BIRTHFIT Podcast Episode 127 Featuring Nicole Jardim

The Period Girl

Lindsey: [00:00:00] Welcome to the BIRTHFIT podcast. I’m super excited to have you on. And you know I’ve been a fangirl, I guess you could say, of yours for a while. Thanks to Instagram. You’re also known as ‘the period girl’. So yeah let our audience know who you are.

Nicole Jardim: [00:00:27] OK. Well first of all thank you so much for having me, Lindsey. I’m really psyched to be on this podcast with you. So I’m calling from New York. And I am the period girl. I kind of laugh at that sometimes because it’s kind of a moniker that I got from people who I do work with. People would basically say something along the lines of “Hey so that girl the period girl, Nicole, the girl who does period stuff yeah she’s the period girl”. So that’s kind of how that came about. And I never imagined in a million years that that’s what I be doing for my work. It’s just it’s really weird. But here I am. And I actually got into this work because I had serious period problems when I was younger. And again you just never realize that these really big challenges in your life whether there are health challenges or something else are going to lead you down this path that you had never even imagined.

Lindsey: [00:01:27] Totally.

Nicole Jardim: [00:01:27] And yet right. I mean it’s just–I actually really hope for women to have some sort of like big thing happen in their life because it–I think it’s a humungous learning experience, but it actually opens your eyes your mind to all of these other potential possibilities for your life that you really had never envisioned before and that was definitely the case for me. From the time I was 14, told my mom that I was going to be in film production. That was what I wanted to do. I was a producer I had seen an article in Marie Claire about it. I had no idea what I was talking about but that was what I was going to do. And I studied that in college and that’s what I did in all of my 20s so completely unrelated. But like I was saying you know I had all of these problems from the time I was about 14 or 15. All of these issues like heavy really painful periods. You know heavy to the point where you got to wear shorts other your school uniform pain like really bad. Like really you know as a teenager when that happens to you it’s like the worst crisis in the whole world.

Lindsey: [00:02:28] Well you get so embarrassed and you’re like “I don’t even–I can’t go to school”.

Nicole Jardim: [00:02:33] Yeah. Right. Exactly. Horrifying. I know may as well just like leave the planet because it’s so bad.

Lindsey: [00:02:39] Yeah so what did you do? Yeah.

Nicole Jardim: [00:02:41] And so I went on the pill.

Lindsey: [00:02:42] Of course, yeah.

Nicole Jardim: [00:02:44] My period panacea it was just one of those things that I wanted to go on because everyone else is on it. The cool kids. And I remember my doctor just fully saying “OK let’s do this. Like I’ll write your prescription right now” and because I’ve said to her I have all these problems my period. Also wasn’t coming. It would come every two or three months. And so that’s when she said “Okay no problem let’s just put you on the pill”. This is a solution. And I was excited because like I said everyone else is on it. And also within a couple of months I didn’t have anymore period pain. My periods were starting to lighten. They were coming every month. But there were only a few days long. I was just over the moon about this because these were–this was truly the answer to all my problems.

Lindsey: [00:03:25] Right, at the time it fixed all your issues.

Nicole Jardim: [00:03:29] I know ‘gasp’. Yes it did. It really did.

Lindsey: [00:03:34] A temporary bandaid. Yeah for sure.

A Bandaid, Not a Solution

Nicole Jardim: [00:03:35] For sure. Oh my gosh yes. And I ended up being on it for about five years. And within that timeframe, you know things really, the bad expletive, hit the fan and I ended up having all kinds of issues. My period actually slowly but surely withered down to one day and then there were times where I just wouldn’t even get it some months. Also my hair was falling out developed melasma all over my face. I had chronic UTI, yeast infections. All of these ridiculous problems that nobody could explain.

Lindsey: [00:04:08] How old were you?

Nicole Jardim: [00:04:09] I was like between the ages of about 20 and 23. This is where it all went totally haywire and I went to so many different doctors and this is what I hear continually from women over and over again is that they see a multitude of doctors and practitioners who don’t connect the dots at all. And so I was seeing a gynaecologist and then I was seeing a dermatologist for my skin and I saw a gut health doctor I did a colonoscopy because I have horrible gut issues. I mean you know like again like the hair loss and all the things. So it was really–I ended up in the E.R. because I had an allergic reaction to UTI medication. It was just really bad. And in that time I’ve just come to realise now as I’ve recently been doing exploration into Epstein-Barr virus so that’s another podcast but I developed Mono during that time and that was when the symptoms really got significantly worse. So now it all makes sense to me. My immune system was just jacked.

Lindsey: [00:05:06] Yeah it was totally shutting down. I’m thinking about when you say 20 to 23 I was replaying my life at that time. And I was like “Wow I was going through very similar things which they you said many women probably at the same time were going through them and yes I went to the OBGYN you know that time I was diagnosed or whatever they call it with abnormal pap smears. Then they want to do a LEEP procedure. But then at the same time you’re going to a dermatologist for the shit that’s going on with your skin and yeah it’s the whole gamut. It’s like put everything together oh my goodness.

Nicole Jardim: [00:05:49] I know right. It’s incredibly frustrating as a woman obviously because it’s compounded by the fact that were first not really taught how all of this stuff works under the hood. So that’s the first problem. And then secondly we’re seeing practitioners who don’t really have a clue actually. And that’s not right to say and it may be an unfair statement but they really in my opinion don’t. And then there–you know again there are so they’re so specific in what it is that they’re offering that they have no clue about all the other symptoms and for whatever reason apparently all of our body parts are completely separate. None them talk to each other.

Lindsey: [00:06:30] Yeah that’s the damnest thing. Oh my goodness. So yeah when all of that started going haywire when did you start to kind of put everything together for yourself or was it years later? How did all that play out?

Understanding My Cycle

Nicole Jardim: [00:06:44] Oh yes so I was in college at the time a friend of mine suggested I see her acupuncturist so I was like “Alright I’ve got nothing to lose at that point let me do that. And for the first time I was probably 23. 22, 23. Somebody said to me “Oh well I can explain what’s going on. I think it’s the birth control pill”. And that was when all the light bulbs went off, it made so much sense. And that is the time around the time I got off of it. Off one of his guidence. Yeah and things started to really shift. He gave me a lot of recommendations around changing my diet and my lifestyle and my exercise and where I was going to buy food from and the whole organic things. This was a long time ago and there was just there was no resources at all and so I just all it is advice religiously, semi-religiously, and got a lot better and that was it that was like 16 years ago or 15 years so yeah and I you know I’ve just sort of been an experimenting on myself ever since the most part.

Lindsey: [00:07:51] Ah yeah. So around the beginning of 2000. Yeah now we’re talking okay. So if you were probably at your time which, I was in Texas at this time ,if you were even to consider acupuncture anything alternative people might look at you like “Wait what are you doing. Like what”. And now it’s at least a little more common, you know.

Nicole Jardim: [00:08:16] It’s yes. I mean I live in New York so it’s pretty prevalent.

Lindsey: [00:08:23] LA’s the same.

Nicole Jardim: [00:08:23] Yes exactly.

Lindsey: [00:08:24] But like I think about some of our regional directors in the middle of the country like some of them even have like maybe one or two OBGYNS or there’s no midwives or you know the access they have to holistic carers few and far between.

Nicole Jardim: [00:08:39] So lacking I know. We really have a long way to go still. Yeah yeah.

Lindsey: [00:08:45] So what are some of the biggest changes you made with yourself at first and how you started to work with your cycle?

Nicole Jardim: [00:08:54] I would say that the most fundamental change was though worst the food that I was eating. I went to Whole Foods for the first time under his guidance or on his recommendation and I’d never been there before. So yeah. This was early 2000s and I was living in Orlando because that’s where I went to college. And I think there was there was one Wholefoods in the whole city at the time and it was tiny. And I remember walking in there and thinking “Wow this is like a whole other planet. I don’t even know what to do here. But yeah like that was a first step and you know it was more about bringing more vegetables into my diet. You know I was I was sort of just finishing college. And I you know who knows what is it at that time. There was just all the while there were a lot of pasta dishes things like that. So under his recommendation he was very traditional Chinese medicine geared practitioner, so his whole thing was a lot of broths and a lot of dark leafy greens, a lot of bitter foods and things like that. So I really tried my best and just again started to experiment with going gluten free and really reducing my sugar intake and you know the refined foods like the refined carbohydrates I started to change that as well. I’d bring in more organic protein. Again that was prohibitively expensive as far as I was concerned in my early 20s. So I just did my best and yeah. So I just and then higher fat. I was terrified of eating fat. I just had basically deprive myself of all of that goodness for years because I’m a child of the 90s and you know it is. It’s crazy but it’s true that we just didn’t eat that.

Lindsey: [00:10:32] That was bad.

Nicole Jardim: [00:10:33] That was so bad. Finally I still see a lot of low fat things around but it seems to be slowly dying off as it should. So yeah those were like the big changes that I felt that I made initially and they seemed monumental at the time.

Lindsey: [00:10:50] Yeah for a young female in their 20s. I remember when I started doing shifts with nutrition and similar experience like walking the whole foods you like what is this. This is a different planet. Who are the apple and what are they doing.

Nicole Jardim: [00:11:07] I know it was the strangest thing to walk into the cereal aisle. And there were none of those brands obviously were are so prevalent obviously in the regular grocery stores. Yeah it was just it was very refreshing.

Lindsey: [00:11:21] No Kellogg’s.

Nicole Jardim: [00:11:24] Nope, no Tony the Tiger.

Lindsey: [00:11:25] Yeah I went to start sharing what you and your body have learned with other women or how did your web site come about?

Nicole Jardim: [00:11:36] Yeah oh my gosh we’re really going back in time. you know it’s crazy Because I remember I think back to being you know that age 17, 18, 19 in my early 20s and I realize now that I actually was giving people advice probably unsolicited for a really long time. And I feel like I’ve been doing that for ages and it just I think it just sort of ballooned from there. But what happened was after I got out of school I started working freelance in the film industry. Like I told you that my dream, my previous life dream. and I did that for about I did that until my early thirties and but and it was freelance and I worked on commercials and film productions and things like that. And I remember in my late 20s or so starting to have this realization that this was actually not what I wanted to do and completely freaking out that I had chosen this career that was basically destroying my health all over again because film productions, film careers are not kind to personal schedules or eating habits or any of those things. And so like I said I had this distinct revelation and the Institute for Integrative Nutrition kept popping up because my chiropractors wife was going to school there then I did a course from a woman who had trained there and so just kept showing up and then I decided that I was moving to New York to go to the last live class. I don’t know how I was planning to do this but I was gonna figure this shit out. And so I did. I was married at the time and I moved to New York in 2010. Sorry 2009. A month later I enrolled in the school and then I did it in early 2010. And I also then went through a divorce. So yeah don’t recommend that.

Lindsey: [00:13:19] Life Transition.

Nicole Jardim: [00:13:20] Ending your career. Oh my gosh. I know the whole Saturn return thing that people talk about that was–it was like on steroids. So I ended up sort of continuing to work in film and TV and freelancing and just typing blog posts like in-between making preproduction books and things like that and just working on the night and the nights and the times that I wasn’t working in film and I did then I did more training with Dr. Sara Gottfred and then I got certified as a women’s health coach and with integrated Women’s Health Institute and then I did a training with Triss Pressor. So I really over the years felt that I needed to so hone my skills in this area because I had had no previous training in any of this at all. And here I am now. So it’s been about seven years since I’ve really really jumped into it full time.

Lindsey: [00:14:09] Also that’s amazing because your training is like–I love your training and your background and you know worth what you’ve done over the last seven eight years. Can you share a little bit with the audience about maybe some training with Sarah Godfrey or even Chris Kresser because I know some people out there maybe thinking of you know going each of those routes.

Nicole Jardim: [00:14:36] Oh yeah totally. You know I think with Sarah it was the first time that I ever I had developed a really clear understanding of what hormones actually do and what it means because I think for so many people we’re just we’re not taught at all what hormones do. I feel like they need a bit of a rebrand, actually. It’s true you know when you when you said the word hormones to women I was doing a lot of market research asking questions they would they would say things like “Well when I think of hormones I think of menopause and I think of hot flashes and I think of really bad moods and I think of negative things”. And to me that just felt so wrong. And when I worked with Sarah she was so light and so funny and yet super scientific and really drilled down into the science of what hormones are, what they do, and how they impact every facet of our lives. And for the first time like I said I felt really confident in my understanding of them and talking about them. And so like I said you know we don’t really even realize that they basically dictate every single thing that we do. From the time we’re born ’til the time we die and yet for whatever reason we have just limited them to this really narrow part of our lives that in fact you know is really negative like I said and really what we should be doing is talking about all the positive aspects of hormones and like I said she really–she nailed that it was incredibly helpful.

Lindsey: [00:16:06] I love that phrase “hormones need a rebrand”. And like you said yeah it’s only like we talk about the negative portion of what hormones do or how they play out but it’s like they dictate everything.

Nicole Jardim: [00:16:22] Everything. whether you want to sleep or you wanna have sex or you want to eat chocolate. I mean I could go on.

Lindsey: [00:16:30] Yeah. OK how Chris Kressers training?

Nicole Jardim: [00:16:32] Chris’s training was quite different. Very functional, very masculine. It was also I think above my pay grade. And the reason I say that is because it was actually for doctors and medical professionals and I weaseled my way in there. I wrote a long letter begging them to let me in and they did. But I would say that I probably fully grasped about 30 percent of it just because it’s so much was.

Lindsey: [00:17:01] It’s so huge.

Nicole Jardim: [00:17:01] Yes super scientific and it was a one year very adept course. So I continued to still go back like I’m always going back and re-learning things and things like that. But I would say that in terms of structure it was I mean Jessica’s program is very similar to hers and that you know it’s it’s very functional and just laid out so so well. Jessica Drumin that is. Integrative Women’s Health Institute. So just really laid out so well and so well-thought-out. And I also thought too that tools were just so useful. I mean I know there’s everything from every single gut health issue that shows up there’s protocols for that. I was really blown away by the depth of his program.

Lindsey: [00:17:44] That’s awesome. So is there any point throughout that training or that transition time that you like “OK. I’m definitely on my right path. I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be”?

[00:18:00] Yeah. You know there was there have been it–there have been tons but one in particular stands out to me it was a really long time ago. Gosh it must’ve been four or five years maybe longer. A friend of mine who I grew up with in Antigua where I’m from originally. She and I lost track as we have each other read not been in touch for a really long time and I received an e-mail from her. And I remember distinctly it was freezing, so it must have been around December. I was standing on a train platform just sort of looking at my phone waiting for the train. And she had–she wrote me this message basically saying that I changed her life. And I did not know that yet. But I was about to find out who she was going to tell me. And she basically said that she had been diagnosed with PCOS and the doctor told her she was never going to get pregnant naturally that she may as well try IVF and that she really had no hope. And so she decided to do some research and came across my website and a couple of my PCOS articles and followed all of my practices that I had suggested in the article and change her diet started to lose weight a significant amount of weight and that she you know she did a whole bunch of other things too a lot of supplements things like that. And she then–my husband did as well. And then she got pregnant naturally and after her doctor said no that she’d never get pregnant and that she may as well just go straight to IVF and her due date was you know was coming up but she just was like I really want to let you know that you’ve completely altered the trajectory of my life and you didn’t even know that and for me it was such an affirmation it was the first time that I’d gotten something like that. Where you know someone had said “Oh you changed my life but you didn’t really even know just because I read your blog post” kind of thing and I remember distinctly that feeling of “Wow OK I think I’m really this is what I’m supposed to be doing I’m pretty much on this planet for this world and that’s it”.

Lindsey: [00:20:05] That’s amazing I love that. Awesome story, yeah. So can we go off on a little tangent and see–explore PCOS for a sec. I wasn’t gonna talk about this but since you mentioned in that story that’s like a really common thing and we get that a lot you know people email in and make their question more for answers they like the nutrition side and the training side. You know my doctor–I was diagnosed with PCOS. Now I’m going through IVF sort of thing. But let’s go back to the PCOS diagnosis and what can women do with that and how can they explore that and stay curious maybe even before going the IVF route you know?

Nicole Jardim: [00:20:52] Oh my goodness yes. I feel that everything should be explored and be found out if possible. Just because I think there are so many women who go through the process and they don’t necessarily have to. And so it’s just that has just having the right resources and the right information. So um with PCOS you know interestingly I had a woman say to me the other day I what did say again she was a psych. You know I went to a doctor and I wasn’t getting my period regularly it was coming every two or three months. And my doctor said to me “Oh well you must have PCOS then”. And I was like “Wait that’s now you were diagnosed”. Ang yeah crazy. So that’s how she was diagnosed. So this is really what’s happening now. There’s a lot of that. And I think that you know that’s obviously really unfortunate because there are Hallmark signs of PCOS that we need to paying attention to. So some of those signs are you know I think that–well I should really preface all of this by saying that I really feel that PCOS is a condition that is really dictated by insulin resistance or blood sugar imbalances and that when we get those under control a lot of the symptoms either disappear or they’re diminished significantly. So that’s when you start ovulating regularly again I mean it is amazing. So what we don’t realize is that insulin is a very powerful hormone. It’s a storage hormone. So it makes us store fat which again is one of the hallmark signs of PCOS is being overweight. So insulin’s that storage hormone. I don’t mess with insulin. I feel like it’s one of those you don’t mess with but when you have a predisposition to having blood sugar issues you might eat an apple and that may cause your blood sugar to spike really high and you might go to the doctor and you might have your fasting glucose tested and your insulin tested and everything comes back normal. But that sometimes happens. But what we’re not doing is really paying attention to what how foods are making us feel and whether they are you know causing blood sugar issues and so I do a lot of work around blood sugar testing with a glucometer because I want women to see what exactly certain foods are doing to their body. Bit of a biohacking tactic. And I just really feel that we need to know this information about ourselves. So coming back to PCOS, it’s I think that that’s one of the biggest issues with it is that we just don’t even realize how much or how many foods or lifestyle things are contributing to this blood sugar dysregulation. And we just sort of go our whole lives having these problems don’t realize. And so when it comes to this condition you know the main symptoms that women should be looking out for are acne on their faces or chest or back male pattern hair loss on the head which is sort of that balding that men get. Hair growth even on the face. So that’s another thing as well it’s a sign. Cysts on your ovaries is another sign, although that’s sort of we’re moving away from that a little bit because lots of women have that. But I wouldn’t say that it’s still a marker for it just because it’s a sign that you’re just not ovulating consistently you have all these little cysts, but they’re really all they are is just you know eggs that have not fully formed. And so there you know it looks like when you think about a pancake it looks like all those little bubbles on a pancake.

Lindsey: [00:24:26] Good analogy.

Nicole Jardim: [00:24:26] I Mean I really like it’s helpful to have an idea of what all this looks like. And so when it comes back to insulin in women, insulin it raises testosterone and in men insulin raises estrogen which is why when men eat too much sugar they drink too much beer they get butts, they get man boobs, and you know they even might lose some of their facial hair. Crazy but it’s true. So for women coming back to us we get more testosterone from higher levels of insulin. Testosterone has an effect on our ovaries. It actually changes the way our ovaries function and it causes a sort of disruption in estrogen production. So we don’t have this whole feedback loop happening anymore where our brain is talking to our ovaries, our ovaries are talking to our brain and every single month we’re releasing an egg. So testosterone just comes right in and disrupts our whole process because we have receptors on her ovaries for testosterone. So in the end we end up with a situation where we have all those cyst on our ovaries for instance and we’re not ovulating consistently we have high levels of testosterone potentially or other male hormones like androstenedione or DHEA which is a sort of precursor to estrogen and testosterone and then– and we’re not getting a period. And so we’re just living what do we do now. And of course the doctor is going to say to you “Well you should go on the birth control pill because that is going to help you quote unquote ‘regulate your cycle’. And if you don’t get a period back after you want to get pregnant, then we’ll just what you will send you down the IVF route.” And that is like the worst thing we could ever do because really the pill is so fantastic obviously at masking all of this symptoms that you are experiencing because yes you’re going to go on that pill and you’re going to get that quote unquote period every month which is just a pill bleed and yet you’re not going to be ovulating still and you’re going to continue to exacerbate the problem. Because it’s like I always feel like when you go when you’re on the pill it’s kind of like you know it sort of does a good job of you–just it helps you just pretend that things aren’t it’s not happening. So it’s almost like ignoring the fire alarm and the fire is still blazing kind of thing. And that’s obviously a huge problem and that’s you know–again it’s tricking your body into thinking that everything is okay. And so your body just further shuts down its hormone production again like I said that brain conversation between your brain and your ovaries and to get that back online after you’ve been on the pill for a long period of time can be really quite difficult. So that’s why I just feel that that is you know that’s just not a solution.

[00:27:19] Yeah I like that–well I like your explanation, but I loved what you said about it. It’s a pill bleed. Yes that’s that’s a powerful statement. And I don’t think I was I think probably in the last 10 years I was shifting my perspective into “Oh having a period is healthy” you know looking at the color of your period looking at the color of your cervical fluid and stuff like that we’re I don’t think either one of us or many American women were taught that.

Nicole Jardim: [00:27:54] Well nobody was taught that.

Lindsey: [00:27:57] Yes. so can we shift gears into that like yeah. What’s your opinion on all that?

Nicole Jardim: [00:28:03] Oh my gosh. Are you kidding me? You have all day. You know I often hear from women who are struggling with all kinds of symptoms caused by hormonal imbalances all the period problems know all the things and they feel like their bodies are broken more and that their body has completely betrayed them and that to me is so indicative of a seriously ingrained belief and this belief is that we are you know we’re doomed because we have a woman’s body. We’re in a female body.

Lindsey: [00:28:37] That’s the first doom, yeah.

Nicole Jardim: [00:28:37] Yeah I know it’s ridiculous. And your doctor tells you you’ve got x y z so you’re doomed again. I mean I can’t tell you the countless women who said something along the lines of “I was 15 when I was diagnosed with PCOS and my mother told me I was never going to have children naturally”. Can you imagine carrying that burden for 20 years subconsciously? And how easy is it going to be for you to get pregnant if you’ve been told from a really young impressionable age and so that you know it’s it’s either that or it’s that you’ve been told what you’re experiencing is normal and just part of being a woman. And I you know I think that so many women can relate to that as well. And I actually I’m all about flipping that script on this because I think this is a very damaging belief system to have. And collectively I think women we have to shift that and unfortunately it is up to us because it’s not happening from the powers that be unfortunately right now. And you know this idea that we are broken, we should suffer in silence, or that everything is normal and we should ignore our intuition about what’s happening for us and I share with them that you know well you know I didn’t necessarily experience your exact symptoms that I can definitely relate to that though because I’ve been in that place of complete misunderstanding and disempowerment and seeing 20 different doctors who couldn’t tell me what was wrong and I basically said to them that your body is not broken and that usually they’re like “No way Nicole, I’m pretty sure”. And you know they’ve been told by their doctor they’ve been fed this story for a really long time that you know when their body behaves badly it means that their body is defective and all I want to say to women is that these symptoms are just your body’s way of speaking to you. It’s speaking in another language which is really annoying, not speaking in your current language, English or whatever it is and you know it’s basically just your body telling you it needs attention. Like there’s a specific part of you that needs attention. And again we’ve been told symptoms are a sign that there’s something really wrong. But I say some are a sign that something is really right that your body is actually working. Because if you didn’t have symptoms that would be terrible your body would have no way of communicating to you that something’s wrong. So that’s really I think the most important thing for women to understand is that you know this approach right now that we have to women’s health and women’s body is ovulation and periods and hormones is a huge problem. It’s resulted in a one size fits all approach to women’s health or women’s bodies and that is like to me modern medicine’s biggest flaw. It doesn’t work at all. And you know no two women are alike. Yeah. Right? I mean no two humans are alike, no two periods are alike and what’s normal for one of us may not be for another one. Some women have a six day period. Others have three day periods and that’s OK. And so I think that we have to really work diligently to not be excluded from our own diagnosis and healing protocol because right now as it stands we are excluded from that. We’re really not–our uniqueness is not taken into consideration at all. And so for women it’s important for us to get to the root cause of what’s going on with our health so that we can make changes that will move us closer to getting better and feeling good again.

Lindsey: [00:32:02] Yeah we have you know take responsibility of our bodies because nobody else is.

Nicole Jardim: [00:32:09] Ain’t that the truth. That’s exactly it. You hit the nail on the head. Nobody else is going to know what is best for your body besides you. I mean some people have thoughts and ideas, but ultimately it’s about you. And I’ve always joked about this they say that women are you know they take their bodies to the doctor like they take their car to the mechanic. I don’t know about you but I don’t know anything about what’s going on under the hood of the car. I’m just like can you please just fix this thing for me and I’ve always–I felt like I had in my early 20s too with my body and like my period and everything I was like “Can you just just fix this like I can’t deal”. Right?

Lindsey: [00:32:43] Yeah that’s so great.

Nicole Jardim: [00:32:47] And so I feel like we need to we need to take some ownership at this point and really look into literally what’s going on under the hood, so to speak.

Lindsey: [00:32:57] Yeah. So let’s do a quick like go through the cycles. Yes I know we chatted about this briefly before but because there’s guys that listen to the show too so giving them a bit of insight as to maybe what their significant other is going through or their sister with the phases are of a woman’s cycle and either what colors are normal or a normal variation, cervical fluid, things like that.

Nicole Jardim: [00:33:30] OK. Amazing. But it’s so funny. My partner Hayden he actually he and I wrote an article for Mindbodygreen a couple years ago about you know a guys guide to the menstral cycle. It’s so necessary men really want to know this. I have men writing me all the time.

Lindsey: [00:33:47] And they’re like scared to ask.

Nicole Jardim: [00:33:49] Yeah because usually they ask at the wrong time of the month. That’s the problem.

Lindsey: [00:33:54] Yeah.

Nicole Jardim: [00:33:54] They just need to know it’s so funny, but anyway. Okay so here’s what’s really cool about women’s bodies: we’re not men, it’s awesome. It’s really boring, we have an incredible dynamic cycle that happens over a period of weeks. And so essentially what that means is that we produce different hormones in each week of our cycle and a typical cycle is really anywhere from 25 to 35 days. That’s where I like to say women should fall into and with not a lot of you know fluctuations throughout. So if you have 25 one month and 27 the next month and then 26 a third month that’s OK. But if it’s 25 and then 35 and then back to 25 then you might want to take a look at that. Not that it’s a humungous deal but you might want to just pay attention anyway so we have significant changes that happen throughout this cycle. And we have these four phases. So our bodies are truly I mean constantly ebbing and flowing. I love to compare them to the seasons to the cycles of the moon. Just because it’s really helpful for women to understand this if they’ve never even heard of this information before. And I just also think to like what I was just saying about understanding the, you know, just the intricacies of your hormones and how they work in each phase of your cycle I think is really the key to unlocking happiness. You know it sounds corny but happiness and potential in our lives right? yeah OK I’m glad you’re on board.

Lindsey: [00:35:22] Absolutely.

Nicole Jardim: [00:35:26] That’s so ridiculous but it’s so true. So anyway so to simplify for everyone I’ll start with just saying that our bleeding phase, which is obviously menstruation your period, starts on day one of your cycle. So day one of bleeding is day one of your cycle. And like I said cycles range should range between 25 and 35 days with a 27 to 32 day window being you know what I consider to be ideal for a fertile healthy cycle. And like I said too I like to correlate to the seasons of nature so at first bleeding phase which is menstruation is the winter season and then the second phase is the follicular phase, I’ll explain why, and that is spring. And then ovulatory which is ovulation is summer and then the luteal phase I consider to be the fall or autumn and then we start back over again with the bleeding phase and you can also do this seasons or sorry the phases of the moon if you’re interested in that too and a lot of people are. Like if you don’t have a period for instance then I’d suggest tracking you know just starting to track according to the phases of the moon and that you know there’s a lot we can do with that, we’ll talk about it, but basically the new moon is your period that the waxing moon is or sorry the full moon is ovulation. Full moon is ovulation and the waxing moon is the luteal phase and then we go back to the new moon again. So yeah wait no hold on. New moon, yeah waxing, full moon, and then waining and then yes. So I knew that.

Lindsey: [00:37:07] It’s brilliant.

Nicole Jardim: [00:37:08] It’s really helpful.

Lindsey: [00:37:10] Yeah and for those that are listening them they can maybe they haven’t explored that analogy yet, I used to when I first started to relate it to the seasons and then got more as I got to know Jen more transistion into the moons. It makes so much sense. If you read things it read things in history are related to history that crops were planted a certain time, cultures did things that a certain time like oh it’s brilliant.

Nicole Jardim: [00:37:40] Right? I know I mean and it’s really cool like when you look at it from a scientific perspective too because obviously there’s so much historical data to suggest that this is what people did. But what’s really amazing is that light affects your menstrual cycle. And so artificial light does as well as sunlight and moonlight which is why so many women–so many babies are born on a full moon. There’s definitely something up there. It shifts and Dr Christiane Northrup talks about this in her book, Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom that there’s actual scientific evidence supporting that why babies are born on the full mooon. Why women traditionally ovulated on the full moon and then got there are periods on the new moon in the darkness. So there’s a whole lot of amazing information on that because melatonin is the hormone in our bodies and it’s affected by light. It dictates our circadian rhythm and it also dictates our menstrual cycle it’s really interesting. Women who work shift work tend to have more irregular menstrual cycles and women who are blind also have issues with their menstrual cycle too because there is no–there are no light receptors or there’s no light getting into their eyes and then translating into the rest of their bodies. It’s really cool.

Lindsey: [00:38:52] That’s wild.

Nicole Jardim: [00:38:55] Yeah it’s amazing what they–what studies are done. I mean you never know nobody–How would you ever know that women who work shift jobs have menstrual cycle issues.

Lindsey: [00:39:04] Or blind.

Nicole Jardim: [00:39:04] Just amazing, the study. Yes exactly.

Lindsey: [00:39:10] Are there are things like let’s say nutrition related or even like in your life. We chatted about briefly like cell phones like do you avoid the cell phone during menstruation or you know eat certain things during the luteal phase. I know I have my weird things going on but I’d love to hear some of yours.

Nicole Jardim: [00:39:34] I want to hear yours too. Yes. Should I just start with menstruation and sort of just go all the way through ok I’ll start from the top down. I’m so linear. So with menstruation with a period typically you know I think a period should really be like three to seven days. If it’s any longer than seven days you’d want to look at that. There could potentially be an Estragon dominance kind of situation happening which we can talk about afterwards. But yeah three to seven days if it’s less than two days then it could be that there is a lack of estrogen building your uterine lining. So just think about that. Or what’s what I consider to be normal. Although I hate or normal but you know what I mean. Regular. Anyway so this is really I think the time of your cycle where your hormones collectively are at their lowest. So your progesterone level has basically been going along pretty high in that second half of your cycle. And then it plunges. And that is what causes the breakdown of your uterine lining. And so as your period gets underway all of those hormones are pretty low in fact except for one so faster and has a bit of a bump and it actually causes a lot of women to feel like super horny during their period. And then there’s this whole period sex conversation but sometimes that happens for women. So that’s something to think about if you really want to have sex during a period that could very well be why and it’s totally OK to do it. Anyway on a like on it from a physical perspective, it’s important to make a note to of your cervix. So your cervix at this time is lower. It actually moves it goes up and down. It’s lower, it’s firmer. It’s kind of like the tip of your nose. And it’s just slightly open so it’s going to just let blood go through and the cervix becomes very important. I’ll talk about that. I do find emotionally women feel a huge sense of relief and they feel like it’s I guess it’s how women feel after they’ve given birth. Like it’s a huge relief. Yeah I mean that’s probably on a whole other level. But yeah something like that just like the anxiety and the anticipation and all the things of the PMS time have finally started to dissipate because you got your period. Yeah you’re like yes.

Lindsey: [00:41:53] That just happened to me like yesterday. Like the whole last week or whatever. Luteal phase like why am I crying? Why am I anxious? Like oh here we go. It really does make them more in tune have become the more I’m like “*sigh* there’s my period. There she is”.

Nicole Jardim: [00:42:17] Yes I know you’ve come to save me from myself. Oh my gosh I know. You know something that’s really interesting actually is that oxytocin which is the hormone of love and bonding and you know like the good hormone. It’s it actually is really high leading up to ovulation and it peaks around that time and then drops quite dramatically and is at its lowest level in the late luteal phase so that last week before your period and it either makes you really just not want to talk to a single person or hug anyone or be near anyone in your life just “F off everybody. I got to be by myself”. It makes you really needy and wanting a lot of hugs and a lot of reassurance and lot of love. So you know again there’s always a hormonal explanation for our behavior. So it’s really important for us to think about that too.

Lindsey: [00:43:08] Yeah that’s so interesting. You know I love the analogy of menstruation to winter because it allows me an excuse. And I guess that’s you know it just allows me time to come back and just reflect and yes. Like not be around anybody and have an excuse for that.

Nicole Jardim: [00:43:32] Yes exactly right. And that’s whats so amazing about our menstrual cycles and sort of living in tandem with them is that we actually do. We have valid reasons now to take time to do certain things and I’ll go into more of that. But this really is that time is that winter. Tired and withdrawn a lot of the time you’re really introspective I always tell women to pull a journal our attention to your dreams during this time. There’s a lot going on. And we really think it’s important for us to really recognize that and also from a perspective of the modern woman doing, doing, doing all the time and being busy busy. If this if there was ever a time in your cycle to take some time off this would be and there is a reason your body feels tired it’s because it’s supposed to. You’re not really supposed to feel like there there’s a reason there is a whole red tint thing happening. Yeah. It’s just I think it’s really important for us to keep that in mind too.

Lindsey: [00:44:30] Awesome. So yes. What about the follicular phase?

Nicole Jardim: [00:44:34] All right so moving into the follicular phase I know I can keep going. I feel like I could think of 20 other points for the for the period phase but alright so follicular. So this–actually the follicular phase really starts on day one of your cycle just so everyone knows so it’s clear. I call it the menstruating part of the follicular phase and the non menstruating part. So we’re in a non training part is a follicular phase and that’s the part where hormones start to get back into action. So when we talk about it like it’s the spring season and spring of course is a time of renewal and the time of growth. A time when like things are just bringing back into action. And it’s kind of the same to your ovaries are starting to repair a couple of follicles and then one follicle will be dominant and that’s what we’ll release an egg. And so I think to also it’s always important for women to remember that you know we’re basically always trying to prepare to be get pregnant. And so this is the phase that is the beginning stage just so you know and it’s not a bad thing it’s a really good thing it’s the point of humans and all that, but–.

Lindsey: [00:45:41] Nature.

[00:45:41] Yeah. Nature, reproduction, just continuing this phase all of it. We’re a little bit more involved in that now but it’s just a evolutionary perspective that your body comes from so anyway. You’re now preparing right? So your brain is releasing follicle stimulating hormone, hence the name follicular phase and that is going to stimulate the ovaries those little follicles at first. And then one of them will become dominant like I said and then your brain releases utilizing lutenizing hormone which is LH. So LH is going to sort of push that out the gate. So to speak the little egg. And that’s going to then you know it pushes ovulation and then you ovulate your egg comes out of your follicle and it sits in your fallopian tube waiting for a lucky sperm. And so that’s basically what’s happening leading you know all way into ovulation but that follicular phase is really great because it really is that time where estrogen and testosterone get up go hormones really start to ramp up and you’ll start to notice that your brain skills are better. You’re going to feel more confident you’re going to feel like you look really good because estrogen does that it’s kind of nature’s way of making you more attractive to the opposite sex. I know it’s ridiculous but it is just what it is. You know it’s testosterone and estrogen are going to stimulate your libido. Again your body in this effort to get you pregnant and you’re going to find too that you might be more extroverted you might be really social. Estrogen also suppresses your appetite so you’ll find that you don’t want to eat as much during this part of your cycle and that of course is always nice. And you know it’s on a physical level you’re also it’s also really important to think about your uterine lining. So that’s now starting to build up and that is you know in preparation for pregnancy and it’s also where your cervix where you remember I said it remains low and closed when you’re you know when you’re having your period but it starts to move up and it opens up as well. So it’s allowing this wetter quality cervical fluid that’s going to come through for when estrogen and testosterone are present. So that wetter quality cervical fluid is what we call fertile quality cervical fluid. And when you see that then it means that you’re potentially fertile so for people who are practicing a fertility awareness based contraception method, that would be you know what they are paying attention to or looking for. And it’s really amazing when you think about your cervix moving up it it moves up for a couple of different reasons. One of them in particular is so that the fastest or strongest sperm can get to it because they actually stop at the cervix you know they feed in the cervical crypts which are what releases the cervical fluid. So take a minute, take a break, and then keep going. And so yeah, only the good ones can get there if it’s higher. It’s really cool.

Lindsey: [00:48:43] It’s amazing that nature does that. So yeah it’s like OK there’s a pitstop here’s the floor is like ready to go, the lining’s ready to go, smooth so sperm can just slide right in. Oh god.

Nicole Jardim: [00:48:57] Exactly I mean that cervical fluid is really amazing too because if you look at it under a microscope it actually has channels that allow the sperm to swim easier. Whereas, yeah,cervical fluid after you ovulate is more like a basket weave under a microscope. And so it blocks sperm and it gets stuck.

Lindsey: [00:49:19] Mind blown.

Nicole Jardim: [00:49:19] Yeah I know right. Our bodies do amazing things every one and we don’t even know.

Lindsey: [00:49:25] Like I would have paid a lot more attention in organic chemistry or something if we studied sperm or cervical fluid under a microscope.

Nicole Jardim: [00:49:45] So yes. So like from an emotional perspective now how all this translates is you know as we’re you know again like I was saying know estrogen testosterone is molding. Oxytocin is building. This is a really good time for group classes or exercise for like business meetings or doing job interviews or public speaking. Any of those kinds of things as you inch closer to ovulation are really great around this time just because you’re really on your game. And so that’s something to think about it.

Lindsey: [00:50:19] So plan your calender.

Nicole Jardim: [00:50:20] Yes plan your calender, exactly right.

Lindsey: [00:50:23] Ok so the luteal phase.

Nicole Jardim: [00:50:26] OK. Well that I should say really quickly so that sort of takes us into ovulation. This is a short time obviously that it’s OK. The egg only lives for about 24 hours. But everyone should keep in mind that sperm can live up to five days in your body especially if there’s fertile quality of cervical fluid. So keep that in mind which is why the window for fertility is about seven days. But women, we are only fertile for a maximum of 48 hours a month. And yet we’re taking a pill or reusing an IUD or we’re to have an implant injected into our arm where we’re taking birth control shot for something that we’re really only experiencing for 48 hours whereas men are fertile every single day. Isn’t that ridiculous?

[00:51:19] They are miracles. I completely agree. I can’t believe anybody gets pregnant. I really don’t. It’s like I know too much now. But it’s like crazy because we should not hold the full burden for birth control as far as I’m concerned because the dudes are the ones who are fertile all the time. So that’s really annoying. But again that’s another podcast interview I think.

[00:51:42] Yeah, take responsibility guys.

[00:51:44] Yes guys who ever’s listening. Anyway so I should just say ovulation really is that peak time where your cervical fluid really is that wetter quality. It’s like a egg white watery stretchy between your fingers. Viscus-like so you’ll notice that and it doesn’t last for too long it’s really only about two to four days or so, somewhere around there. And that is a time where leading up to ovulation is really the time where if you were trying to get pregnant that’s when you have sex, because it’s really hard to actually know pinpoint the exact time you’ve ovulated unless you’re taking your temperature and maybe even getting an ultrasound to see if an egg is released which is not exactly possible for most of us. So like I said this is the time where you know all the hard work that your body’s been doing over the last like seven to 12 days. This is where it culminates and you have these peak levels of estrogen, testosterone so you’re really at that time where you are so confident and you’re just you’re on your game. And so everything is you can conquer anything. This is a time where I get so much work done. I’m so super focused. You’re also really wanting to have sex or you’re really horny so go out with your significant other. Or go on a date or do whatever. But like you know have fun during that time of your cycle. It really is. It’s a good it’s a good time. I should say too. Yeah. You know like I was actually thinking about this. There a lot of women don’t feel great around ovulation and this is something to look into you talk about this on my Web site about something called histamine intolerance. And you know I have a histamine issue where basically your body makes too much of this histamine which is kind of like the issue with anti-histamines where they they quells symptoms of stuffy, sneezy, watery eyes things like that. So sometimes our bodies make too much and that’s usually because there’s a gut bacteria balance or we’re not eating the right foods on things like chocolate sadly affermented foods wine and beer and things like that have histamine in them and so if we have a sensitivity to that estrogen also ties into histamines and so when we have this high estrogen might make us feel not so great. So that’s something for people to think about too and I could definitely link a blog post from you on that info. If someone does feel like “Well Nicole I don’t feel good in ovulation” that’s potentially why.

Lindsey: [00:54:08] Ok.

Nicole Jardim: [00:54:10] Yes. And so that takes us into the luteal phase and then we’re done. Oh my gosh this has been a marathon. So the luteal phase is I think notoriously has a notoriously bad reputation and I find that yeah you know it’s really sad. But it can be really good. And so I think what people need to realize is that ovulation sort of slowly tapers off. So we feel pretty grateful that first half of our luteal phase I’d say like the first three to seven days. Usually people feel like they’re just riding high off of the ovulation wave. And so that’s great. And then what happens after ovulation is estrogen and testosterone drop, progesterone starts to rise. So that’s that second the hormone that dictates the second half of your cycle and progesterone is this heat inducing hormone which is why if someone were taking their basal temperature throughout their cycle they would see their temperature rise in the second half if they’ve ovulated. So what’s really cool is that all of follicle that your egg came out of actually starts to release progesterone and it’s microscopic, It’s crazy. But it releases enough progesterone to support a pregnancy if one happens the first three months until you know basically the placenta takes over. So it’s really quite a remarkable thing that your tiny little ovary does that and so Progesterone is one of those hormones that I find is good and bad. And the reason they say that is because it of has to be in the Goldilocks amount in that it’s–too low progesterone and you will likely have severe PMS issues but too high progesterone can also cause things like that too. One in particular is depression and major mood disorders. So it’s really something to think about when we are assessing our progesterone levels. So for progesterone. You know I call it the Keep Calm and Carry on hormones and it’s kind of like a natural valium. It helps you sleep, it helps with our brain function. It’s really one of those great hormones. I’m sorry. There’s a ambulance going by. I don’t know New York is. So like I was saying I think this is a great time to really start to take things off your calendar. And I think that that’s a problem for so many of us is that again we are just not at all aware of these phases of our cycle and the strengths and weaknesses or the strengths of each phase. And so we push through because again we’ve never been told this stuff. And so we pushed through that last week right leading up into our period and then we have PMS symptoms and we wonder why you’re craving massive amounts of carbs and chocolate sugar. You have huge moodswings. Your husband or your wife or your partner never knows if angry you or happy you is gonna walk in the door. I mean you know the whole spectrum. And I think that for women in our crazy modern world we just have to be so respectful of the remarkable cascade of hormonal events taking place simultaneously and that we you know if we can start to wind down so ticking things off our calendar like I said and really using the skills that I think are so important in this second half of your cycle. You know things like analytics and stuff. I do a lot of my accounting and bookkeeping stuff in the second half of my cycle. I do a lot of house clean up an organization. You know there’s a lot of really great aspects of this part of our cycle but we just don’t even realize it because we’ve just been told that it’s a terrible time and we just have to push through.

Lindsey: [00:58:07] Yeah I love it. It’s almost–I hope people hear this episode and listen to you and take take it as permission to definitely take things off the calendar. Switch around some events like book or organization to maybe a time of the month when your body is like “Oh yeah this could be fun now”.

Nicole Jardim: [00:58:25] Yeah I know right.

Lindsey: [00:58:28] Yeah totally.

Nicole Jardim: [00:58:29] It totally could be. Of course obviously there are the days where you just want to be on the couch and that’s totally ok too because again your body is literally telling you it’s time to rest. And that’s the message that you’re going to get in that last week of your cycle so definitely pay attention. I have noticed though by the way and this is what I think is a really interesting phenomenon is that and I know this because I have ovulated and gotten my period–like ovulated on the full moon and got my period on the new moon and gotten my period on the full moon and ovulated on the new moon. And when I switched and started getting my period on the full moon I noticed they would have this huge surge of energy leading into my period which I’ve never experienced before. So that’s something for women to pay attention as well.

Lindsey: [00:59:13] Wow. So that takes, and this kinda goes into one of my last questions but connection, like you really in tune you’re connected to your body and your soul. Are there any things that you do, practices that you have, that allow you to facilitate this connection daily or even monthly?

Nicole Jardim: [00:59:38] Yes. Oh my gosh so many things. I make sure–I know that I can’t keep up with myself, but I really make sure that Hayden, my boyfriend and I we take a walk in the park every morning. And it’s really funny. He takes photos of me every now and again. I hug trees I touch plants I get into the foliage just because I live in New York and it’s a very ungrounding city as you can imagine and so it’s really helpful to just like be in nature as much as possible so we would take like 30 to 45 minute walk every morning in the park and when it’s warm-ish. So yeah that’s one of the first things I do and I find that it is tremendously helpful. I also I I really make an effort to do some kind of meditation. I also love hypnotherapy. So I’m doing hypnotherapy right now for a couple of different things. So make sure I’m meditating or do the hypnotherapy recording that I have you know every morning and every night. I also use a grounding mat and for those of you don’t know what that is you plug it into their grounding outlet on your wall and it is basically an electrical current. And so it really helps diffuse the effect of all the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth and all of these crazy EMFs that we’re exposed to on a basically constant basis. And I know I’ve said this to you before but for everyone who didn’t hear this part. You know EMFs or electromagnetic fields have been connected to low progesterone. They’ve been connected to heavy periods. Electric blankets have even been connected to miscarriage. So you really have to be cognizant of how these unseen forces literally can impact are our menstrual and our hormonal health. I think the other thing more than anything is that I make a massive effort with my food. I spend way too much money on food. But I feel like I’m going to pay the bill now rather than pay it later. Yeah. And I think that for a lot of people having decent healthy food is not all the time at least is not necessarily within their budget or it’s not accessible to them. So I always recommend just doing the best you can. More than anything bringing more veggies into your diet. I don’t feel like there’s ever been a shortage of vegetables in anyone’s diet or there’s never been too much of an abundance of vegetables if you want that like the girl in shortage mode. And so I think that you know like the leafy greens like I make an effort every single day to have some kind of leafy greens in my diet. If it was not a great diet day whether I was traveling or something else or I was rushing I just know that I had made that one effort. So that and a few key supplements I feel like those are the core that if we could all just do those things we’d be much better off.

Lindsey: [01:02:33] I love it. So How can women work with you. I know you have a couple programs on your website but maybe share about how people can find you and what that may look like.

Nicole Jardim: [01:02:45] Yeah for sure. So you can–first of all my site is ‘NicoleJardim.com’ And I have e-courses so I have a fix your period course I have a track one and a track too depending on the symptoms that you have. If you have questions about the symptoms or which track may be right for you then you can just send us an email to support at Nicole Jardim and I also work with very few people one on one but I had to scale that back majorly just because there are so many other projects happening. And then I also do group programs so I do a group fix your period program that’s live and in person. Well not in person but you know live once a year and I, also for women who are health coaches who are curious about learning more about women’s health, they also have an apprenticeship programs that I offer in the spring as well once a year and it’s a six month program. Yeah for anyone who–

Lindsey: [01:03:42] I’m like “Hey”.

Nicole Jardim: [01:03:43] Hi ‘sign me up’. So That’s that’s another thing too that you know I’ve had tremendous success with it and women really really love it. So um there are a couple different ways to work with me.

Lindsey: [01:03:53] Awesome. And don’t you have your own podcast as well.

Nicole Jardim: [01:03:57] Yes I do.

Lindsey: [01:03:58] So what is that called?

Nicole Jardim: [01:03:59] Sorry there’s Another ambulance, hold on.

Lindsey: [01:04:04] What the hell.

Nicole Jardim: [01:04:04] He literally seems like he’s gonna stop right in front of the building.

Lindsey: [01:04:07] They might.

Nicole Jardim: [01:04:08] Yeah that happened the other day. Okay. Yes I have a podcast it’s called The Period Party. We have recorded well over 100 episodes at this point and it’s just I feel like it’s an abundance of information on hormonal health, women’s health, issues that affect women. I mean I could go on but that’s another way to connect with me as well. And then of course social media I love playing on Instagram. It’s one of my favourites. I still post on Facebook but you know Facebook yes. So Instagram is the jam.

Lindsey: [01:04:42] Totally. Well I mean I’ve been a fan like I said forever and I think the information that you put out is fabulous and comes from a really authentic and truthful place. And so my goal is they just giving this is like a teaser for you know our audience and maybe they’ll go and do an e-course or go and listen to your podcast and stay curious and start to do a little bit of work on themselves and fix their period you know. That would be that would be the goal there.

Nicole Jardim: [01:05:12] That would be.

Lindsey: [01:05:12] Yeah. Is there anything that you want to share that maybe I missed before you gotta to go to clients?

Nicole Jardim: [01:05:19] I know right. Oh I don’t think so. I just you know I think more than anything I just want to remind women who are listening in and men too so you can talk to your women that your body is an amazing machine. She is working hard for you every single day of your life. And I know it doesn’t feel that way especially if you’re not feeling well. But trust me she is and she just needs the right ingredients. It is a right things the right combination of food and lifestyle changes and stress management to really work optimally and so pay attention to something that doesn’t feel right and if it doesn’t and your intuition is telling you that, go with that. Don’t look outside of yourself, like look inside to see what’s going on.

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