There’s something melodious and calm about Will.i.am’s third solo hip-hop/R&B album — but there’s also something boring about its euphonic electro-funk dolor. Songs About Girls plays like a pop-concept album, showering you with flowery beats and songs about what seems to be a seven-year break-up. “She’s a Star” does sound a lot like Justin Timberlake’s “What Goes Around Comes Around,” except that the chorus about shining stars is neither karmic nor produced by Timbaland — and Will.i.am’s stilted pop and background electric guitar are not at all Timbaland. “I Got It from My Mama” and “The Donque Song,” two tracks about ass, are just not that booty-shaking. The best track is about breaking up and feeling “Fantastic,” with ironic vocals and herky-jerky Jackson 5 sampling. That might not be a bad sign if rumors of a collaboration between Will.i.am and the fallen “King of Pop” are true. But for now, like MJ rumors and songs about shining stars, Songs About Girls is only almost fun.

The Big Hurt: Michael and Steven, RIP Even if I got scooped by everyone else, I believe my inimitable wit will ensure that my reportage goes down in history as the definitive account, so here goes: Michael Jackson died.

40. Mickey Rourke Consider it a badge of honor, Mick: if they gave out Oscars for unsexy, you’d have a mantle full. We predict his comeback won’t last too long, but he might be able to extend his stay at least a little by leaving the hair extensions on the cutting-room floor.

Cutting Loose Her new third album, Loose , celebrates the emancipation of Nelly Furtado.

More than a feeling The centerpiece of the Museum of Fine Arts' "Contemporary Outlook: Seeing Songs" is Candice Breitz's 2005 Queen (A Portrait of Madonna), a wall of 30 televisions, each showing a different Madonna fan singing a cappella to her 1990 greatest-hits compilation, The Immaculate Collection. They wear headphones, bob their heads, sing aloud to music we can't hear.

Mommy, what's with Michael? " After I got HIStory , I played it incessantly. It was the greatest, strangest, angriest, most bizarre thing I ever heard. Michael Jackson is this iconic persona..."

Interview: Jamie Foxx "Until you get a chance to define another side of your career, people will always say, 'You're doing it as a hobby.' "

The Thriller is gone With the release of Bad (Epic), Michael Jackson ends a recording hiatus of nearly five years. He could have stayed away for 10 years and still not have escaped the shadow of Thriller , the biggest-selling album of all time.

When Jacko was king Richard Nixon may be the only figure whose decline in popularity eclipsed Michael Jackson’s.

Culture clash If there were two golden rules worth following for this reviewer gig, they’d be never conflate an artist’s backstory with her product, and never read other people’s reviews.