5 Creative Ways to Protect Your Bike from Thieves

Let’s face it… If you’re into cycling (like, big time) chances are you routinely splurge on your set of wheels. A new tire, a cool brake system that works better than the one you bought 2 weeks ago, a lighter frame that’s so much faster and easier to lug around, an aerodynamic helmet that will help you break your latest speed record, a better suspension for that epic downhill trail you spotted yesterday… the list goes on (and on). Am I not right? Case in fact is that your awesome bike is probably worth quite a bit and you wouldn’t want anything bad happening to it. Or, worse… you wouldn’t want to get your bike stolen! It’s always important to protect your bike by locking it up or storing it in secure location once you’re done. Of course there’s the obvious key lock and chain, but here are 5 creative ways that you can use to protect your bike when you’re not using it…

(Please note that CycleMap is not responsible for anything that happens to your bike if you happen to use any of these techniques mentioned below. We are not responsible for any stolen bikes or missing pieces. Thank you for understanding.)

1. UGLIFICATION

Yes… It means exactly what you think it means. Make your bike ugly. Add tape to it (you know, the kind that peels away without leaving any residual glue) or make parts appear as though they’re being held together by rope or string. Use washable paint markers to leave fake scuff marks here and there on the strategic places of your bike frame. Tape sponge to your bike seat to make it look as though it’s torn up. Basically, let your creativity go wild. Have fun with it and uglify your bike to your liking. (Heck, you can even make a family activity out of it! #ArtsNCrafts) If you do this, nobody will even want to take it from you. It’ll be so ugly it won’t warrant any attention.

2. TIE YOUR BIKE WITH A STURDY FISHLINE

Okay… So, this one sounds a little strange, but it really works. Tie your bike to a tree or pole with sturdy fishline. Be sure to keep your line loose so that the robber gets a taste of his own medicine if he tries to rob it. Don’t think it’ll work? Think again. These guys gave it a go and look what happened:

3. ADD AN AIRBAG TO THE SADDLE

Again, the guys from TwinzTV created an awesome technique that involves integrating an airbag to your bike’s saddle. Once the thief decides to run away with the bike, you can set a timed airbag off that will send the criminal flying. Take a look:

4. USE AN EXCESSIVE QUANTITY OF LOCKS

If you add over 50 locks to your bike, you can be darn sure that nobody is even going to attempt stealing it. First of all, it would be way to long to dismantle; the person would surely get caught. Secondly, nobody will even want to go near it. Especially, if you booby trap a motion sensor alarm system.

5. MOTION-SENSOR ALARM BOOBY TRAP

Now, this one is quite entertaining. If you’re savvy enough you might just be able to pull this one off with style. Imagine, setting off an alarm that says, “Please, step away from the bike! I repeat, please step away from the bike!” or “Hey! What are you thinking?!” or even “Sorry! Try again! Better luck next time buddy!” Just think; if the alarm is really loud it’ll bring attention to the thief and you can be certain that he won’t be taking your bike. Plus, it could be quite entertaining.

BONUS: ADDING FRAME PROTECTION

But let’s be serious here… If you’re really looking to protect that bike of yours you should add frame protection. It won’t look ugly, and it won’t ruin your paint. Watch and learn people:

What did you think? Will you be using any of these crazy techniques to protect your bike from bad guys or evil vilains? Let us know what you think! Oh, and don’t forget to share this with a fellow cycling friend if you’re looking for a good laugh!

PS- If you’re still looking for a good laugh you might want to take a peek at the European Bike Stealing Championships. (Yes, they really have an official bike stealing championship!) Have fun laughing! 😉