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Friday, July 10, 2015

The Woman With No Name, Part 3

I ran out into the verdant gardens surrounding our Stiletto Flats compound (they really are beautiful this time of year - here's a picture if you're really interested)

and gave chase to The Woman With No Name. Alas, she'd gotten too much of a head start and managed to give me the slip.However, in her hurry to leave, she left some items lying on the path in the picture above, so I grabbed them up and took them to the guys. "Guys, " I said, panting a little since I had been running outdoors in desert temperatures (kinda makes you wonder how our gardens look so good, dunnit? Well, I'm sure you know how we are fabulously wealthy playboys, so of course we don't do our own gardening - don't be silly! No, we have a team of Unbelievababes who receive a pretty penny from us for working their horticultural magic on our backyard.

This is Valerie.

Birgitte...

Gaby...

and Raquel.

These four do a fantastic job of ensuring our gardens look lush and beautiful year-round.)so, anyway, where was I? Ah yes."Guys, " I said again, "what do you make of this??"

Of course, it wasn't this neatly arranged when I found it, but I didn't really have time to go get my camera and take a picture. Time was, as they say, of the essence. But you get the idea.

"Well," replied Clark, "I'm no expert, but that looks to me like all the tools a person would need to have with them if they were in the massage biz - specifically the holistic therapy kind.""Why on earth would a nameless masked female-type woman of the lady variety be carrying massage equipment-""Holistic therapy massage equipment," interjected Clark. Sometimes he can be a real know-it-all, you know?"Holistic therapy massage equipment, my apologies. Why would she be carrying that while sneaking around Michael's room at night?" I asked.Clark and I both looked at Michael.An awkward silence ensued.Finally, Michael spluttered, "Whaaat!?! What are you guys looking at me for....?""Oh come on, Michael. We do this for a living. We see the evidence, add it all up and come to a logical conclusion.""B-But...""And the obvious conclusion," sighed Clark, "is that that wasn't the Woman With No Name at all, but some massage babe-""Holistic therapy massage babe", quoth I."Holistic therapy massage babe, I'm sorry, Jeff," continued Clark, "who just happened to be giving Michael's gnarly feet the once-over, among other things, isn't that right, Michael?"Michael blushed and fessed up. He'd been secretly having his feet worked on, among other things, by a hot masseuse holistic therapy masseuse because he was so embarrassed about the state of his feet.

NOT Michael's feet. But you get the idea.

So we still don't know who the Woman With No Name is. She could be anywhere, doing anything. She could be this lady...

or this...

or this...

or even this.

But one thing is for sure. When you see her, you'll have no idea who she is.