Stop it. Just embrace the fact that you are lucky enough to be a happily married man. I mean, I'm actually jealous of you. You've got stability, a great marriage, devoted kids. You know what I have? A Sims* family that keeps getting murdered. So quit whining and be grateful.

...Since I will probably never EGOT, I'd like to take this block on SquareSpace to thank my family and friends. Without them I would be nothing. So thank you, love you. You are my everything and everything I do is for you. Thanks for putting up with me. And to the new friends on the internet, can't wait to meet you either.

*Note: I don't have and never have had a Sims family, but its a metaphor. So throw me a bone.