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Topic : 01/03 Love Resolutions

Number of Replies: 128

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Created on : Wednesday, December 28, 2005, 12:02:44 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

It's a new year and time for resolutions! If you're looking to put the spark back into your marriage or find the relationship you've always dreamed of, this is your year to turn your love life around. Dr. Phil's first guests say they've lost that "lovin' feelin'" in their marriage because they bicker about everything -- from what to watch on TV to who should drive the car. Will they learn to become the stars in their own marriage? Then, Dr. Phil follows up with Janet and Noelle, who are determined to find a man. After reading Love Smart and brushing up on their dating skills, how will their next dates go? And Jeannie and Jo-Ann are back to get more dating advice from Dr. Phil. It's time for these guests -- and you -- to get a love fix in 2006! Share your thoughts.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

Other way around

Sure Jo-Anne has her issues but I really think the problem is that guys today just don't see any benefit to being in a serious, committed relationship with one woman. They think getting married is about torturing themselves and would rather use women for sexual gratification. Anything else is just "prudish" and "old-fashioned." Why is love old-fashioned?

Today's single women are too good for the single guys that are available!

Dear, you have it backward. It's the other way around. WOMEN are the ones who cheat and use MEN. Women are always scanning the malls-while their man is in tow. Women are always fantasizing about Brad Pitt or Donald Trump. It's WOMEN who use MEN for financial gratification.

Today's American single women are cheap, unfaithful liars.

I have been faithful. It's the chicks (if they were ladies, I would have used the term!) who believe that marriage is old-fashioned and prudish. They want to jump any guy with a fast car. Then, when their bodies start falling apart in their early 30s, they settle with YOU.

The reason why men fear marriage

In my single days, it seemed that men avoided marriage like a proctology examine. I finally did marry in my 30's and even though my husband was fearful of marriage he knew it was important to me and he loved me enough to commit.

If all single men want is a "roll in the hay" why not go to a bar and pick up a drunken floozy, and leave the nice marriage minded ladies alone.

The real reason why men fear marriage has NOTHING to do with FIDELITY. Rather, it has to do with the fact that WOMEN choose to DIVORCE and then STEAL 50% of the husband's money-whether or not they earned it!

Women are the unfaithful ones

Sure Jo-Anne has her issues but I really think the problem is that guys today just don't see any benefit to being in a serious, committed relationship with one woman. They think getting married is about torturing themselves and would rather use women for sexual gratification. Anything else is just "prudish" and "old-fashioned." Why is love old-fashioned?

Today's single women are too good for the single guys that are available!

No. Women (who are supposed to be independent and roaring) are the unfaithful ones. I ALWAYS wanted to get married since I was IN MY TEENS. I NEVER wanted to go down this road. But, years of torture have made me realize that American women are worse than priests. They abuse men psychologically and financially. While women claim that WE are unfaithful, it is THEY who wear short skirts and plunging necklines IN PUBLIC and say that flirting is harmless.

Wow

Jim you really sound like you've been worked over by someone. Or were you always this misogynistic?&nbsp

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I'm sorry you feel this way about American women, but you must know how ridiculous it is to make such a grand generalization. The only way you could get away with this would be if you had, in fact, dated every American woman. You've just had some unfortunate experiences and it sounds like you've been going for the same type of woman each and every time. Maybe that's your problem.&nbsp

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I think it was a reknown therapist who said, "to repeat the same (disfunctional) behavior is insanity". Look back at the women who hurt you and see their similarities. If you weed through and eliminate the negative similarties you should find yourself attracted to and also attract someone more compatible for you.&nbsp

You're kidding right?

There ARE NO marriage minded women (not ladies) in this country. They want to spend, spend, spend and send the poor guy into bankruptcy. Then they dump him and go to the next poor fool.

To American women, marriage is nothing more than a platform where they try to control us. Now, "ladies," I'm not talking about men who cheat (but most husbands who cheat wouldn't have to if wives just do their job and put out!). MEN are the rulers of the house and the kings of the domaine. Women follow the orders.

And there you have it.. the real reason women are always on guard and impossible to aproach. Are you kidding me? Follow orders? Jim! C'mon man! you are giving the old fashioned gentlemen a poor name. It's best, if you decide to have any children one day and dont want to give them a bad name, you have them illigitimately.

I will not dissagree that the majority of women like to spend. I've dated my share of them. However, you cannot generalize the entire female population in this country like so. If you find yourself being controled or submissing in a relationship, and not happy with this outcome, maybe consider dating women that are not of the materialistic nature. Most times, you can look at a woman and within a few minutes know if she is about material or heart. Far too often us men go for the materialistic woman because she projects herself out there. Wants to be seen. Is showing off what she has accomplished with herself. Next time maybe look over her shoulder at the gorgeous self reliant woman sitting in the corner eating her bagel and mindiung her own business. Now, find a way to aproach her, and all your problems are solved.

By the way, when you find said apraoch, write back asap! Inquiring minds want to know!

Geez

No. Women (who are supposed to be independent and roaring) are the unfaithful ones. I ALWAYS wanted to get married since I was IN MY TEENS. I NEVER wanted to go down this road. But, years of torture have made me realize that American women are worse than priests. They abuse men psychologically and financially. While women claim that WE are unfaithful, it is THEY who wear short skirts and plunging necklines IN PUBLIC and say that flirting is harmless.

I'm the best-and I'm finding a real woman....outside of America.

Jim it looks like have been dumped on more than once. But not all women bow down to the almighty dollar, and the majority of us are nothing but faithful.

In my search for a spouse money never played into the equation you can be rich and still be sleaze ball i.e. Larry Flynt. It may be a southern thing but down here if you sleep with a man for money and prizes you are a prostitute.

Also I have know my husband for more than three years and I have never so much as glanced at another man.

remarrying ex

On Nov 12,2005 I remarried my ex-husband, We married the first time in 1994 divorced in 2000, Following my husband's near fatal motorcycle accident, the day before our plan weekend together. we are back together. this is where I should be, but don't want to make the same mistake as before which let us to be apart. Any suggestions?

I live with my ex-husband (after 3 years of divorce). We have not yet remarried (not sure if we will), but I, too, am afraid of making the same mistakes. I try real hard to think about what happened the last time (breakdown in communication, not spending time together, etc), and I try to NOT let those things happen again. However, it is really hard when I'm the only one that sees some of those things. You know men don't really look at things the way we do. So, my advice, as long as you can acknowledge what did happen the last time, you will know what to do (or not to do) this time. I think it is real important to get him involved as well (good luck on that note!!)

01/03 Love Resolutions

There ARE NO marriage minded women (not ladies) in this country. They want to spend, spend, spend and send the poor guy into bankruptcy. Then they dump him and go to the next poor fool.

To American women, marriage is nothing more than a platform where they try to control us. Now, "ladies," I'm not talking about men who cheat (but most husbands who cheat wouldn't have to if wives just do their job and put out!). MEN are the rulers of the house and the kings of the domaine. Women follow the orders.

I am very offended by that comment you just made for many reasons.
1. I am a woman and young lady and I am not looking for any man for his money. In fact, I ALWAYS offer to pay for at least my half of the date and I do take my man out and pay for both of us to keep things "fair".
2. I am in my early 20's and I have been thinking about the kind of wife I want to be since I was 16. And working on myself and accomplishing the things that I want to before I join with someone else so I can be the wife I want to be and have a WONDERFUL marriage. I also expect the guy I marry to do the same...put in some work into our relationship and be for me what I need him to be in my life and I of course want to be his helpmate his encouoragement his support his everything (including sexually) I don't want my husband or a boyfriend to be destroyed by me or any one else...that;s not love and doesn't come from love and the man I marry I am going to love unconditionally!
3. I think you got the whole thing wrong about men being in charge of the household. You seem to veiw it as a powertool as a way to control and demean women. I do believe the man is the head of the home (because of religious beliefs) but that title doesn't come with the right to abuse anyone in your home. It doesn't give you the right or final word...it's still a partnership and a true man would lead his family in a loving honorable way and have a wife and children WILLING to follow. We don't follow orders you are not our owner or our boss or anything and if you cross that line where you think you have all the power and your wife should OBEY you then your marriage is doomed!
I think it is you that is very bitter! If you find love and happiness in a woman who is not in America...Awesome...but look at yourself and fix yourself before you start pointing the finger at all of us American women and telling us we are horrible and should change.

Agreed with Cheeky and Dan

Jim you must have had some very bad experiences in the past. I am for a fact a marriage minded woman. I am not looking to marry for money. In fact I am making good money for myself now and I am in school to eventually make great money for myself. Not every woman out there is looking for a man just for his money.