I stumbled upon this site, www.warholian.com, through one of my FB friends. Among the many messages in this picture, lies one that can be related to negotiation.

As I’ve mentioned before, negotiation outcomes are closely tied to our relationship with the other party and to our ability to empathize with them. If we restrict ourselves to a narrow circle of relationships with people just like ourselves, we deny ourselves the opportunity to broaden our perspectives. When it comes time to sit down at the negotiating table, an artist’s tendency to “mix with all classes of society” should provide an advantage in being able to relate to a broad spectrum of people.

Are you sometimes your own worst enemy? Do you find excuses for why you can’t or won’t do something? Let’s look at some misconceptions about negotiation that may be keeping you from getting more, because negotiation is the fastest money you will make or lose.

Misconception #1:Negotiation isn’t relevant for me.

Often, people associate negotiation with labor union vs. management disputes. They envision picket lines and angry people shouting across the table at one another. It’s not surprising, therefore, that artists might shudder at the thought of any association with it, believing that nice guys don’t engage in such distasteful practices. But union negotiations are just one of many types of negotiation situations.

In fact, we negotiate daily with nearly everyone we encounter, in business and in our personal lives. Procuring funding from a wealthy patron is a negotiation; so is deciding whose turn it is to walk the dog. Because resources are so precious for artists, it’s critical to acquire good negotiation skills in order to stretch your resources as far as possible.

Misconception #2: Negotiation is not socially acceptable.

Some of our misconceptions about negotiation are cultural. Most Americans do not grow up learning to negotiate. Words such as haggling or chiseling add to the negative connotations of negotiation. But, bargaining is a way of life in 75% of the world! It’s accepted, it’s expected and it’s respected.

Learning to negotiate provides a double payback. You will benefit when you are in the role of the seller, e.g., selling an artwork, as well as when you are the buyer, e.g., purchasing things you need for your studio or your personal life. Both will improve your bottom line.

Simply put, negotiation is seeking agreement. It need not be a contentious process. William Ury, co-author of Getting to Yes, defines negotiation as a discussion leading to agreement or to the decision to walk away and pursue other alternatives. Another definition: Negotiation is the art of persuading someone to do something they don’t want to do. My personal favorite: it’s letting other people have it your way. However you define it, you are negotiating every day, whether you recognize it as such or not.

Misconception #3:Negotiation is a business skill, so I won’t do well.

Historically, negotiation has been considered an art; ergo the “art of negotiation”. Indeed, negotiation involves interpersonal skills, the ability to convince and be convinced, and to know how and when to employ various negotiation tactics: these activities engage the creative side of the brain. Yet many artists consider negotiation a business skill, and therefore harbor the misconception that it is something they would not be good at. Given the context of negotiation as an art, this is simply not true.

More recently, negotiation has also been recognized as a science, in that it involves systematic analysis for problem solving. In his book, The Art and Science of Negotiation, Professor Howard Raiffa purports that less is known about the scientific side, though research continues in this area.

One thing is certain: there is no shortage of disputes. Raiffa (and most other professional negotiators) believes that, “many disputes could be more efficiently reconciled if the negotiators were more skillful.” So artists, let’s get started.

GETTING STARTED

The first step in becoming a good negotiator is to develop a negotiation mindset. Everything can be negotiated, but you have to ask. The other party isn’t going to willingly give up profits or savings to you if you don’t ask for them. Would you?

As validation for the above, I turn to research by Professor Deepak Malhotra, who is currently on the faculty at Harvard Business School.

The research stems from a negotiation class that Professor Malhotra was teaching at the Kellogg School of Management, to students who worked during the day and took classes at night. Professor Malhotra asked the students to negotiate something in real life and turn in a written report about the experience. Thirty-five of the forty-five students negotiated something for themselves; the remaining ten negotiated something work-related. The results were impressive: for those who negotiated something for themselves, the median savings was $2200; those who negotiated something for their employer produced a median savings of $390,000. These results are testimony to the power of negotiation training. But even more illuminating is the students’ response to the question of what tactic they used to attain this success. The students reported, “Choosing to negotiate at all.”

If you don’t ask, you won’t get. Negotiation opportunities present themselves on a daily basis, but if you don’t adopt a negotiation mindset, you may not recognize them. You can choose to seize these opportunities or to ignore them and get less.

As with anything, practice makes perfect, so use situations where the stakes are low to practice your negotiation skills for catching bigger fish. For example, if I want cremini mushrooms for a recipe I’m making, but the grocery store is out of them, I ask for a discount on the white mushrooms I purchase as a substitute. I’m a regular customer; their job is to have basic ingredients in stock. They’re happy to accommodate my request. It’s not about the $2.00 per pound that I save, though that adds up over time. It’s about practicing my negotiation skills, so that I’ll be ready when I face a $2,000 negotiation. These small negotiations do not take much time. They require only that you have a negotiation mindset and the confidence to ask.

A COMPETITIVE EDGE

Because of its universal applicability to work situations, many employers give preference to candidates with negotiation training. If you are an artist who is seeking employment or advancement in your current position, good negotiation skills can help your profile cut through the clutter and give you a competitive edge.

Copyright Nancy J. Fox, January 2012

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This article is the first in a series of posts that will appear at the beginning of each month as part of the strategic partnership between Negotiation Fox and GYS*T Ink.

Sometimes people want to try before they buy. They may want to see how your artwork fits into their environment or their collection before they commit to owning it. If you put artworks out on approval or consignment during 2011, end-of-year is the perfect time to settle those arrangements.

If the pieces have been out on approval past the originally agreed upon period, or if the period of time for the loan was not expressly stated or committed to writing, you might consider a tactic called the presumptive close.

In the presumptive close, you will use language that implies that the transaction is, so to speak, a done deal. Here’s an example:

Let’s say you put a piece out on approval three months ago. When you contacted the interested party thirty days later, s/he indicated that s/he wanted to return the piece. However, s/he didn’t return it. Perhaps you left the piece there a little longer in the hope that s/he would change their mind. (Btw, hope is faith’s sister.)

Instead of contacting the other party again to plead for resolution of the situation, try the presumptive close, i.e., send the other party an email stating, “Happy New Year! I hope you play your best golf yet this year. In closing my books for 2011, I noticed that I forgot to invoice you for xxx piece. I’m pleased to have my artwork in your collection.” If you’ve received any press, awards, etc., this is a good time to promote your work, so the other party will feel good about the purchase. Then, continue with, “Attached please find my invoice.”

By using the presumptive close, you should get action: either the other party will pay for the artwork or s/he will return it. Either way, it’s better than having to leave countless voicemail messages begging for resolution. In the worst case, you will get your artwork back. That artwork is an asset that can be re-deployed in 2012.

If properly used, the presumptive close has the potential to turn stagnant transactions into sales, while preserving the relationship with the other party.

Jump start 2012 by learning how to get more through effective negotiation!

On Monday, January 2, 2012 at 2:00 p.m. PST, I will be a guest on GYST Radio. If you’re not available for the live broadcast, the segment can be accessed anytime afterwards on their blog, through the same link.

We sometimes feel pressured during a negotiation to make a decision. Perhaps that pressure comes from the other side, or perhaps it is pressure that we put on ourselves, because we perceive indecision as a sign of weakness. Regardless of the source, it’s important to allow ourselves time to make complex decisions.

Research conducted by Maarten Bos, et al, shows that distraction, whether for a few minutes, overnight or a few days, can facilitate the processing of information, help us prioritize, and result in better decisions. By taking a break from the problem, we allow our unconscious to do some of the work while our conscious self rests. If you need time during a negotiation to reflect on a critical decision, take a break or schedule a second meeting on another day. While away from the issue, do something you like to do, work on something else and get some rest. The need to reach a decision won’t go away, but chances are you’ll have a clearer picture of the alternatives afterwards. When faced with a complex decision, give yourself permission to sleep on it.

The norm of reciprocity is firmly ingrained in our culture and is a very useful tool in negotiation situations. If I do something for you, you feel an obligation to do something for me. However, if the favor that we do for someone is not immediately reciprocated, the value of that favor begins to diminish in the other person’s mind. Conversely, in our mind the value tends to increase with the passing of time. As our respective perceptions of the value diverge, the possibility increases that the favor could actually damage our relationship, because the party who has done the favor will feel that he or she has been taken advantage of, or that the other party is ungrateful. Here are a few tips on how you can prevent this from happening.

1. At the time you do something special for someone, mention that you know they’d do the same for you.

2. When the time comes that you need something in return, mention how happy you were to help them out a while back when …

3. After you’ve done them the favor, ask them if it helped them. In other words, before too much time has passed, get them to tell you how much it meant to them. Verbalizing their gratitude while it’s still fresh in their mind will help them remember it later.

4. If you are the party who needs to reciprocate, try to do it sooner rather than later. When you do, mention how happy you are to be able to help the other party out in light of the recent favor they did for you. That lets them know that you think the score has been settled.

Statements like, “paybacks are h__ll” are usually too crass. C’mon, we can do better than that.

Reciprocity is a valuable tool in negotiation, but it’s important to manage it properly.

Relationship is a crucial component of negotiation. Our relationship with the other party in a negotiation will have a strong influence on the outcome. A well-known tenet of fundraising, which is a type of negotiation, is that people give money to people, not organizations; development professionals know well the importance of relationship in procuring philanthropic gifts. Furthermore, the very act of coming to agreement with someone creates and amplifies a relationship.

But relationship can work against us if we let it get in the way of common sense. Sometimes we think that because we have such a good relationship with someone, we can skip some steps. But in any negotiation, regardless of how good the relationship may be, it’s important to discuss all the issues. Don’t assume that the other party is in agreement with something, unless you have discussed it. It’s better to bring everything out now than find out later that there is a point of disagreement that you failed to address, because you thought any reasonable person – and for sure someone with whom you have such a good relationship – would see it the same way you do. In the moment of agreement, with the high fives, the clicking of champagne glasses and other acts of celebration, it’s important not to let the emotion and euphoria of coming to agreement cloud your thinking. Everything is always fine…until it isn’t.

As important as it is to put all the issues on the table during negotiation, it’s equally important to document the final agreement carefully. Don’t leave anything out, assuming that “we’ll remember that.” People forget, people interpret things differently and people leave organizations to go work somewhere else. In Robert Frost’s poem, Good Fences Make Good Neighbors, he reminds us that the purpose of fences is not to settle disputes, but to avoid them; you put the fence up before a problem arises with your neighbor. Similarly, written agreements and contracts – even if nothing more than an email confirming the agreement – serve to avoid the eruption of disputes later on, and foster a good relationship with the other party for the future.

To paraphrase the beloved poet, Robert Frost, “Good agreements make good relationships.”

I’ll be presenting a three-hour workshop for the Center for Cultural Innovation in Los Angeles on November 9, 2011, from 6:30 – 9:30 p.m. The workshop will be held at the Japanese Cultural and Community Center (more location details at the link). To allow time for interactive activities and exercises, participation is limited to 25, so if you’re interested, register soon.

Let’s face it. Sometimes we make deals that we later wish we hadn’t made. Or, under the pressure of negotiation, we agree to a specific point in a deal to which we really didn’t want to agree. In hindsight, we often gain perspective on what we should have said or done to express our disagreement. Sound all too familiar? If this happens to you, keep in mind that it’s not too late to change things. You can try to re-negotiate.

A friend recently mentioned that he regretted agreeing to a stipulation in the agreement with his new employer and wished he had negotiated over that point. Here are a few tips for re-opening negotiation, based on my friend’s situation, i.e., an employee/employer situation. These tips can be tweaked to fit other situations, also.

1. To re-open the conversation, you could say something like, “I’ve given some thought to our agreement, Joe, and I’d like to go over a few points again. I really enjoy working here, so it’s important for me to understand your position. When would you have a few minutes to meet with me?”

2. When you meet with your boss, be sure to thank him/her for their time, and reiterate that you like your job. Adopt a problem-solving attitude and indicate that you’re sure that if you put your heads together, you’ll be able to come up with a solution.

3. Use standards to argue your case. For example, let’s say you disagree with the commission structure. The reason for your disagreement could be based on what similar companies are paying (the standards: fairness, competitive bids). Whenever possible, frame your points as questions, e.g., “Other firms in town are paying 5% commission. I know you want to have the best talent; that’s why I came to work here. Can you help me understand how you arrived at 4%?” Now you’ve asked the other party to explain their standards!

If relevant, you might also craft an argument about what you need to earn to pay your bills. Though that’s your problem, it can become your employer’s problem if you quit because you can’t make ends meet (standard: your quality of life). “It’s important for me to be able to maintain my existing quality of life. It affects my self-esteem, as well as my discretionary income to network regularly.” Self-esteem and networking will help you sell more, so this might have an impact on your employer; it’s the so-called WIIFM. Follow that with a question such as, “How do you think we could resolve this?” Perhaps your boss agrees to a monthly expense allowance for networking/ social expenses. Help him/her along by throwing in some of your ideas. You’re not trying to get the job anymore, you’re just working together to solve a problem.

4. Your goal is to find a solution that works for both of you. In this case, perhaps you can negotiate a sliding commission scale, benchmarks for you to meet in order to get a higher commission rate, an equivalent year-end-bonus, a car or gas allowance or a networking allowance. Be creative!

So, if you’ve made any deals lately that you’re not happy with, go forth and re-negotiate. You’ll be glad you did!

Many people don’t take advantage of opportunities to negotiate better deals, because they are afraid to ask. They may be concerned about offending the other party, thereby damaging a relationship, or perhaps they fear rejection. But not all relationships are equal. Here are two tips on how to overcome this obstacle to getting more in life.

1. Differentiate between personal relationships and transactional relationships; the former are friends and family, people with whom you interact frequently in your private life, often on a more emotional level. The latter are people with whom you do business; this category includes vendors, contractors, service providers, retail establishments, and even colleagues at work. A salesperson may try to come off as your best friend, because s/he knows that creating confusion in your mind about the nature of your relationship may cause you to accept a less lucrative deal. Don’t become prey to this tactic; keep in mind that you may never see this person again. Even if you do business with someone on a repeat basis, it’s important not to confuse the nature of the relationship. In a transactional relationship, asking for what you want is just good business practice. With regard to colleagues at work, consider that despite rapport you may have established, you still compete for promotions and raises, i.e., the relationship is transactional.

2. Ask yourself, “What is the worst that can happen if I ask for what I want?” Assuming that you give a reason for your request and don’t threaten or insult the other party, the answer is probably that the other party says no. You are in no worse position than before.

Everything can be negotiated, but you have to ask. I hope these two tips will give you the confidence to ask for what you want.