How To Handle A Breakup

How To Survive A Breakup

Don’t Stalk Her

Yes, it’s tempting to Facebook-stalk her, but you really need to resist that urge. It will only pull you back into a negative mental space. Unfriend her on Facebook, delete her number and, most importantly, erase all those texts so you don’t end up wading through ancient history. Don’t email or text her trying to get in the last word. Clinical psychologist Dr. Carl Hindysays doing so will only “have you feeling worse about yourself.” In addition, you’re just “making the breakup easier for her and giving her more justification that you’re not the right guy.”

Stay Single

You might be tempted to get into a rebound relationship with the girl who first crosses your path, but that would be a huge mistake for multiple reasons. Dating expert and blogger Yue Xu points out, “How many times have you woken up after a night of rebound sex only to find yourself lonelier?” Truer words have never been spoken. Sleeping with another chick might help you in the short term, but the next day you’ll just find yourself comparing your rebound to your ex. Not only will you feel worse, but you’re also going to make that lucky girl feel like crap unless you made it clear she was just a one-night stand, either way: bad karma.

Learn to Talk to People

Most women have multiple friendsto turn to when they need a shoulder to cry on; guys have it much harder. While you may have a bunch of buddies, it’s probably tough picturing yourself leaning on them for emotional support following a tough breakup. Collins suggests that men build an “emotional cushion.” You don’t need a ton of buddies on call, but having one or two guys with whom you can talk things out will vastly improve your psychological state.

Stay Busy

Instead of relying solely on alcohol to numb your pain, focus on working out or other physical activities that will increase your serotonin levels and allow you to channel your anger into more productive activities. Take up that hobby you’ve been putting off, use the breakup as an excuse to get into those new activities you’ve had your eyes on but never the time for. Go on a guys’ trip or even a solo adventure and just get your mind off of things.

In the end, a breakup can be a good time for reflection and personal growth. Ask yourself what you can learn from the situation, and, instead of beating yourself up or dwelling on the negative aspects of your ex, set yourself goals and expectations for your future relationships. Avoid doing things you’ll regret and wait until your emotions have cooled down before you approach her again, if at all. It can seem like the world has come to an end, but if you focus on how you can better yourself, you can move on with dignity.