This month we’re digging deep, going around and around in circles, and mortgaging our credibility up to the hilt. In other words, a typical Nerd Nite. No, there’ll be no hearts and flowers for this post-Valentine’s evening—just lots of platonic nerd-love—as a mortgage analyst untangles the real estate muddle, archaeologists dig up dirty deeds from the past, and roller derby bad-asses sprain and explain. Be there and be square!

We all know the economy sucks, but how did we get into this mess? Learn about the $10 trillion world of “shadow banking,” why it went BOOM, and why it’s not going away. Find out how seemingly innocent statistical models became weapons of wealth destruction. Understand leverage: what it is, how it can make you rich, and how it can make you very poor. And for those of you hoping to get some Bay Area real estate for your very own: learn why the government, the banks and your grandma all think you should buy….and why you might be better off renting!

Michael Nierenberg is VP of Analytics for Mill Valley-based Redwood Trust, where he builds models to forecast mortgage performance, home prices and mortgage-backed security valuation. Basically, this means trying to convince otherwise skeptical people that he can predict the future using magical computers made of clouds. He attended the University of Pennsylvania, where he drank a lot of beer, and occasionally took some classes in economics.

Kari Jones is an archaeologist at the Presidio of San Francisco. When she’s not unearthing long-lost treasure and fighting Nazis at work, she spends her leisure time sporadically pursuing a doctorate at UC Berkeley in hopes of one day becoming a bona fide Dr. Jones.

Liz Clevenger is a curator at the Presidio of San Francisco. While she still gets to play in the dirt once in a while, she’s usually in the lab doing scienterrific things to the old stuff that comes out of the dirt. She’s the one who knows exactly where the Arc of the Covenant was stashed in that warehouse full of government goods.

More than just the subject of an angsty Drew Barrymore coming-of-age film, flat track roller derby is the fastest-growing sport in America. Join Tae Kwon Ho, Trixie Pixie and Slaybia Majora of the San Francisco ShEvil Dead as they break down the history, rules and basic strategy of roller derby. Their presentation will instill a strong base of knowledge that will impress your friends and help debunk the misconceptions perpetuated by pop culture for this oft misunderstood sport.

Established in 2004, the B.ay A.rea D.erby (B.A.D.) Girls are a full-contact, women’s flat track roller derby league. B.A.D. is a fully skater-owned and operated 501(c)(3) non-profit with a mission to provide amateur athletic entertainment to the Bay Area. A proud member of the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA)—the official governing body for modern roller derby—B.A.D. is currently ranked #3 in the West. The San Francisco ShEvil Dead was the first home team created by B.A.D. and is currently one of five teams in the league.

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DJ Alpha Bravowill be spinning circular musical media solely of the vinyl variety, and also performing spot-repairs on the turntables. (Be sure to ask him about the huge “dirt booger” he extracted from under the platter last time.) Alpha Bravo is VP of left-field pop label, Radio Khartoum, and was one of the forces behind legendary SF pop-club nights, Anisette and Schokolade.