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Funny satire stories about High speed

The government has given the green light to the HS3 project that will see trains travelling from London to Dublin in under 30 minutes.
The all new trains will be fitted with custom made nuclear reactors that will pump out nearly 2 million horse po...

Only weeks into the project of moving the Pennines thirty miles east, it has been decided to move them back again. However, due to the nature of the move, the Pennines will have to be completely moved thirty miles east before moving them thirty miles...

The Pennines, a range of hills that run down the back bone of England, are to be moved thirty miles east to make room for a high speed rail link between Leeds and London.
"High speed rail links need flat land," said engineer, Ray L Weigh. "The Pen...

Dorking, just south of the Great British Capital that is London, encircled as it is by the chastity belt of the M25, has been announced as the southernmost end of the High Speed Rail link.
"This is great news," said local resident, mobile hairdres...

The brand spanking new high speed rail link that will allow people in Manchester get to London in under an hour, even if they have to stop in Birmingham, has hit yet another snag.
Before a train even rolls along the rails, there are no trains.

The proposed high speed rail link between London and Manchester, with the shortest possible stay in Birmingham as is technically feasible, has been given the green light to be built, despite opposition.
However, protesters against the new rail lin...

A man officially identified as a Darwinian 'missing link' has been fined $2,000 for filming himself masturbating while speeding along the highway in his convertible.
The man is in jail until August after pleading guilty to growing high-speed cann...

Upyers Press - Amtrak Officials have been working on a highly controversial, yet secret project at a test facility located in northern Alaska. The train has been under development since 2000 and has reached speeds as high as 666 mph, but would only a...

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Holiday tips from Santa!

When interviewed, Santa clause was quoted saying "Remember, if you're going to jingle then please jingle all the way". So remember folks, Santa doesn't like a half-assed jingler.

Trump Names Sarah Palin as Chief of Staff of...

...the Upstairs Maid Crew for the White House!

Fidel Castro's Death Leads to 9 Days of Mourning

Trump's election is 22 days of mourning and counting.

Irish Priest Barred by Vatican

Controversial Irish Catholic theologian, Fr. Finnbar O'Murphy has been excommunicated by Pope Francis for declaring that "Jesus Christ did not want to suffer... for humanity or anything else."

Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

He thinks "The Deputy President," or even "President, Jr." would be acceptable though.

Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

The Deputy President, or even President, Jr. or would be okay though.

New Category in This Years Oscars

The new category is "The Dumbest Lyrics in a Musical".Fav is The Bodyguard where... Whitney Houston sings to Kevin Costner..."We both know I'm not what you... you neeeed..." What he needed was specs.

George W. Bush and Barack Obama Are Secretly Glad Trump Was Elected

They know that when Trump's term is over, no one will ever call THEM "Worst President Ever" again.

Thanksgiving Pardon

Today President Obama pardoned all the turkeys who voted for Donald Trump.

They will live out their lives standing in unemployment lines, waiting for Mr. Trump to Make America Great Again.

Trump Says He Forgot His Secret Plan to Defeat ISIS

"It's so secret I was afraid to write it down. But it'll come to me, I'm sure" said Trump.

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