Porndogs: A Preview

The director of Marilyn Chambers' last movie gives AVN the lowdown

SAN FRANCISCO - Critics have been saying for years that porn is going to the dogs - but sometime this winter, they'll be right. But is the world ready for a mass-market hardcore dog movie?

"The story is basically about an innocent who's about to be spayed by her owners, and she can't understand: 'Why would they do such a thing to me?' explained Greg Blatman, director of Porndogs: The Adventures of Sadie. "Essentially, before they decide to get her spayed, Sadie comes into heat, and for the first time in her life, she has these longings and feelings and she has no idea what to do with them, and so when her owners tell her that she's going to be spayed, not only does she not want the surgery, she needs to fulfill her biological and physiological desires. So when she goes to the big city, she's on a quest to experience life as a girl. And she has a number of trysts along the way."

ADVERTISEMENT

Normally, such a movie would be done as an animation, but Porndogs has a live-action all-canine (almost) cast, starring Blatman's own yellow Labrador as the lead - and for several reasons, Blatman decided that Marilyn Chambers would be the perfect choice for Sadie's voice.

"We chose Marilyn because we were looking for star status and we were aware that Porndogs, because of the nature of the project, is going to receive not only attention but it's going to get some sort of notoriety, controversy, on the order of, did you harm these dogs or whatever," Blatman said. "And Marilyn was the perfect choice because she's somebody who's experienced that sort of notoriety in her career, plus she's been in the adult film industry, and she was a beautiful blonde."

"When we chose her, we didn't know, first of all, if she would accept the part, and we didn't know that she loved animals, and that was one of the most beautiful coincidences," he continued. "We arranged a lunch with Marilyn and Peggy [McGinn], and we got on famously, and her biggest concern was, how were the animals treated? Because she wasn't there for the filming; she was just doing the voiceovers, and I assured her, 'Sadie is my dog; I would never let any harm come to her,' and for her that was enough; as long as the animals were safe and the animals had fun, then she was going to have fun too. So we arranged the studio dates and we worked with her. She did maybe 20 takes at different times. She was eager; she loved it; she had a lot of fun, and she performed wonderfully, and when the film comes out, you'll hear her voice work, and it's like she was just the perfect choice."

What is particularly weird is, the shoot turned out to have a lot in common with the typical adult movie.

"I did a lot of research ahead of time," Blatman assured. "My concern, as a dog lover, was for their safety. So I talked to two veterinarians, I talked to a couple of animal trainers and made sure that there was absolutely no chance of harm. And then for the male dogs, we used professional stud dogs, and the parody of human sexuality is played out perfectly also in the production. First, we had to check all the dogs for sexually transmitted diseases, because breeders can't have that passed on, so we had to do this. We're not going to put a condom on the dog, but we had to check. And also, it's the female that makes the decision, so we brought in the professional male stud dogs, but Sadie only chose who she wanted to have sex with. The males could do all they wanted, but Sadie's a big girl, and she told them exactly what she wanted, and when she was satisfied with the partner or the pairing, she went at it."

And yes, the movie actually does show dogs having sex with each other - but there's a lot more to this comedy than that.

"Tera Patrick's in it," Blatman detailed. "She plays a wonderful role and she was great to work with. Evan Seinfeld is in it as well. Tera plays - you know how most adult videos begin with some sort of an advertisement? Well, Tera plays Trisha, who is the 'Call 1-800 for a good time' girl. She's a French bulldog - very different from the way Tera looks, because Tera is stunning. And then Evan plays a smaller part: Three kinds of junkyard dogs, or let's call them construction workers, who are sitting at a fence, who heckle all of the girls, or dogs, who walk by, and they meet Sadie and they have a few words to say with her. Heidi Fleiss is in it, and Heidi plays a Rhodesian Ridgeback , and we have the most wonderful girl-on-girl scene you have ever imagined or never could imagine that dogs could possibly perform. This is hardcore, up close and personal. These are the things you never wanted to see your dogs do."

"We also have Ron Jeremy," he continued. "We first brought Ron in to do a small cameo. He's the only human face that we see in the film, but we were talking and he said that he can do a voice impersonation of somebody who I'll just leave unnamed at this moment, someone in the adult industry, and I listened to Ron do the voice, and I said, 'That's great!' And we had him do two takes, and he did one in his own voice and one with this celebrity impersonation. He plays the producer of the film, and he's in a series of outtakes at the end of the film where essentially he's playing the producer who's auditioning the dogs. It's very comical."

Most of the cast is comprised of mainstream performers, but a few have industry connections.

"Dustin Diamond 's in it," Blatman said, "and we know about his film. Then we've also got the rapper Too Short, who plays a one-eyed Doberman, and it's a very, very funny scene. And there's the comedian Paul Ogata , and he plays a Shar-Pei. He's a Japanese-American, and I needed an Asian to do the voice, and he did a great voice for the Shar-Pei. And Paul Rodriguez is in it, and he plays the Chihuahua. Paul's not involved in the adult film industry but we're still hoping. He just finished Beverly Hills Chihuahua, now he's done Porndogs, and his next film is Cats And Dogs , so I guess he's carving out a niche for himself."

Blatman doesn't know when Porndogs will be released, since it's still being edited, but he isn't ruling out the possibility of a Christmas opening. After all, everybody likes animal films ... even if this one is just a bit different.