Spookie’s report card

Spookie, the rough and tough kitty we’ve been trying to teach and tame, has been with us several weeks now. Most folks in the neighborhood just shook their heads when we took him on and started serious instruction. But, the poor cat! People were throwing rocks at him. Nobody wanted him around. He didn’t get a square meal anywhere else. Indeed, he was a sorry, scruffy outcast. And we simply couldn’t turn him away. So, anyhow, Spookie got neutered and had his shots. Then classes got in session. Every morning and every night the teacher (me) has been out in the yard, trying to cram civilized behavior into his furry head. We (and he) have had varying degrees of success. But it’s now time for his first report card:

GROOMING. Spookie, the formerly scruffy, is looking good and gets an A. He’s furrier, fatter –and he’s taking pride in keeping his black and white coat very clean.

EFFORT. B plus. Spookie seems to be trying to figure out what behavior is expected and then to do things right. There are lapses, of course, in this regard. Sometimes he still swipes at the teacher if she doesn’t put the food down fast enough. He also nearly knocks her over when she comes out of the door with the Meow Mix. But he’s much improved.

SCHOLASTIC ACHIEVEMENTS. B. Spookie has learned to snooze peacefully on the porch and to roll in the garden like he owned it. He has mastered staying around and seldom wanders as he did in the past. He has discovered the fascinating possibilities of soft cat beds and has found out that cute outdoor rugs are for sleeping on, not scratching to pieces. And he no longer ignores cat toys but finds them intellectually stimulating.

GETS ALONG (and plays well) WITH OTHERS. C minus. Well, what can I tell you? Spookie Cat still knocks every cat out of the way at dinnertime and insists on stealing his classmates’ lunches, which doesn’t bode well. He still eats out of every bowl and his feline friends watch with both deference and disgust. He just watches Cinnamon and Mao at play and doesn’t join in. Spookie must work harder to improve here. His teacher also must work harder to help him, but she is worn out.

As for the feline’s future–there’s hope.

Recently an assistant teacher (Muffin) decided to join the staff, which consists of me. Muffin, my beautiful and fluffy yellow cat, has ventured close to Spookie and has been showing him the best places to study birds while staying cool in the yard. (“Over there by the pecan tree is best, Big Boy.”) Muffy also has been taking the rough, tough kitty to task when he has acted up in class or at recess. If he comes over and tries to steal her lunch, she simply gives him a bop on the head as if to say: “Shape up.” The first time this happened–well, you should have seen the surprised look on the big and formerly intimidating guy’s face. The second time–well, he quickly learned that Miss Muffin the Schoolmarm meant business.