Jokes with Realistic Endings

Via Something Awful. This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. Highlights:

bq.. A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar, sit at the end and start having some drinks. Two hours later, they come out with a better understanding of each other and a mutual respect, the beginnings of a friendship that last a lifetime.

bq.. What do you get when you cross a chicken with a centipede?

A media circus about the debate over the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

bq.. How do you drown a blonde?

Hold her head underwater until she can no longer breathe and stops struggling.

bq.. Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?

Repeated absences and stealing.

bq.. A man walks into a bar.

He drinks 6 Newcastles, 4 shots of Jack Daniels, hits on the waitress unsuccessfully, takes his wedding ring off, tried again and fails, drinks 3 more shots, drives home, beats his daughter for coming home late, and cries himself to sleep realizing that he hates his life.