We hear it everyday-- "With so many, it's hard to choose."
"DDS or DVS?" "MPA or
MPE?" "Choices, choices, choices." Frankly, the International Association of Fake
Universities (IAFU) is disappointed by this either-or thinking. Where does
it say one can't have multiple degrees? Four? Certainly. Nine? You
bet.

Yes, IAFU encourages you to graduate
every
way you want. And to prove we mean it we've put everything we offer on a handy
check sheet. Before you matriculate use this
tool to easily identify every degree you've ever wanted.
After you obtain your degrees, use it to easily remember you've graduated.

Context
for IAFU heavy users

To
help you better understand what you're getting yourself into as an IAFU mainliner, we
want to take a moment to discuss semantics. First, let's address the word
"real". It's a designation you see a lot on product packaging, as in
these crackers contain real cheese or these chips are made with real
potatoes. Well, to us the "r word" is best left in the snack
aisle.

We
like the "f word" better. It's a term synonymous with efficiency
and boldness. Faking something is faster than actually doing it.
Even weaving tangled webs is quicker. Faking is what Eddie Haskell
did, but Beaver couldn't. Who was bold in that duo?

Let's
move on to "fraudulent". This is an ugly word. We've found
it's a favorite with the same crowd that calls wild flowers "weeds"
and calls puppies "little trouble makers". IAFU has no time for
these individuals and advises you to avoid them as well.

Finally,
we would be remiss without mentioning "humbug". Before
Scrooge used the term, it was a nice, funny sounding word, but we're afraid he
ruined it by his strong association with ghosts and a crummy Christmas.

Context
is important. IAFU hopes we have imparted the insights necessary for the
successful heavy use of our service.