Inspiration

Yesterday, I was inspired to spend time reflecting on 2018 and planning for the year ahead.

Even though rituals aren’t always my thing, I stumbled into one that I’d love to share with you. Maybe it’ll inspire your own.

Working with natural cycles, like the end of a year and the beginning of a new one, is a powerful way to work with the energy of the universe. For me, it helps me to feel more in tune with the Earth and with my own intuition. It’s a time for me to access guidance from a source that feels much larger than myself.

Collaborating with cycles in your life & career will smooth out the sometimes bumpy ride while bringing pleasure to the process.

(Working with cycles is a part of Surrender Strategy – a set of steps designed to help you become stronger and stronger at manifesting the life and career you want).

Let’s dive into what I did to mark this New Year transition. I hope you’ll celebrate this transition in your own way.

My first step was to reflect on the year that’s ending.

What were the high points of your year? What points were lows? Is there anything you see now about your year that you couldn’t see while it was happening?

When reading Tarot or seeking any sort of guidance, it’s important to step into the energy of the highest version of yourself & what you’re creating. If you’re feeling anxious or scattered, lacking connection and confidence, that’s sure to come through in the cards. So, when you’re doing this at home, make sure you’re taking time to get in the right head space first.

For my 2018 reflection spread, I pulled a card from each deck for each quarter of the year. (A total of eight cards). I surrounded the spread with some crystals and gifts that I’ve received this year.

As I read about the cards I’d pulled for each quarter, I looked through my calendar to remember what’d been happening during the three months in question. I jotted down some notes in a special notebook I keep for times like these.

I remembered that this year has been amazing, and amazingly challenging, full of super high highs and the lowest of lows. In hindsight, I see so clearly how it all unfolded and where I might’ve focused my energies differently.

What are you learning from 2018? Take some time to remember and reflect on your year.

If you don’t have cards to use and you want to try something similar, it might be fun to pick a book and flip to a different page for each quarter of the year, looking for clues about helpful guidance and takeaways. You could also check out the Galaxy Tarot app for your phone or browse through the Tarot online. Or, of course, skip this part all together, and simply reflect!

The second step of my ritual was to release what I don’t want to take with me into 2019.

What patterns of thought, beliefs, behaviors, or material items can you release now – to walk into 2019 a little bit lighter and more focused?

I’ve been wanting to burn some of my morning pages for some time now, so I figured this would be the perfect time to do it.

I gathered up as many of these pages as I could find, got a metal bowl and a lighter, bundled up, went outside, and started burning.

Quickly growing cold and impatient with the burn, nervous with the wind, I went inside.

My morning pages burn-fest became a tear fest. I tore up a year’s worth of morning pages into little pieces, put them all into my big metal bowl. Before I disposed of this, I smudged with some sage – an herb held sacred by Native Americans, used to purify negative energies and attract positive ones.

While I tore things up, I found myself reading through some of my thoughts from the year and reflecting some more.

(It’s worth saying that I write my morning pages on the computer now. As much as I love writing by hand, I love being able to review and delete regularly without using paper. I’ve also found that this encourages me to write more professionally, because it’s all happening in the same place).

While I had the sage out, I took the liberty of walking around the house to smudge each room. I focused my thoughts on blessing and clearing everything that’s taken place up until this point, asking for safety, love, and abundance to fill our space in 2019.

I’ve also been spending lots of time cleaning and organizing, donating as much as possible, getting rid of what’s no longer needed. This is another great way to release and work with the energy of the New Year.

What can you release right now to better prepare yourself for next year? Is there anything you’d like to do to symbolize this letting go?

For instance, you could write some things down on one sheet of paper, then burn that or tear it up. It doesn’t need to be the time-consuming act of tearing a huge stack of paper.

The third and final step was to look forward to the year ahead.

I chose to do another Tarot spread with the same decks. I pulled a card from each deck for each month of the upcoming year. Again, making sure to select my cards from a calm, confident, connected energy, focused on my life purpose and what I’m creating.

As I went through month by month, I jotted down some more notes in my notebook reserved for Tarot readings. I took three sittings to get through the whole reading, plus a couple of snack breaks!

I received some inspiration for how I can organize my year. For instance, I’ll set aside plenty of time for learning in March. I’ll plan some time to focus on love and relaxation in July. In May, I’ll be ready to lovingly nurture my creative projects, even if that means making some sacrifices to get the work done.

I noticed a theme for the year ahead. It’ll be a year of professional focus, a year of being unapologetically myself even in the face of adversity.

Sounds like it might get a little uncomfortable at times, but hey, isn’t that always true? I’m excited.

What are you expecting in the year ahead? What would you love to see happen? How will you organize your year?

How will you make this ritual your own? Please share with us in the comments.

I hope that we’ll stay connected in 2019.

A last reminder – over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing the steps of Mental Wholeness one-by-one here on the blog.

Mental Wholeness is designed to get you deeply connected with yourself (and something greater, if you believe in that sort of thing) so you can magnetize the perfect people and opportunities to you. It’ll help you find success in the New Year regardless of what resolutions you’re setting.

Make sure to follow me here or on social media if you want to stay in the loop.

Thanks for reading. I hope you’ll enjoy celebrating the turn of the New Year. See you in 2019.

Daily practice of these exercises keeps us sailing smoothly when life gets rough… when mistakes, losses, and the unexpected happen.

They help us love ourselves and others more fully.

READ: Significantly fewer “blow-up moments” that become shorter, scarcer, and actually more enjoyable over time.

(Mental wholeness takes us a step further… teaching us how to plant beautiful green grass & a flower garden exactly where we are in life – so we can create the world we want, rather than wistfully dreaming about the other side of the fence).

Emotional Alchemy deepens our experience in life, whether we’re new to emotional work or we already know our emotions deeply.

Saying “yes” to something like this doesn’t mean we’ve failed in any way, or that we can’t handle our shit.

Investing time and energy into this means we’re smart. It means we’re playful and curious. It means we’re open and willing to expand in all areas of life.

With these tools in hand, we’ll be better together than we could ever be alone.

Wildly successful people focus on their goals every single day, 365 days each year.

A real sense of fulfillment comes with identifying what you want, then focusing on it every single day until you have it. This is true regardless of what your specific goals are or what “success” means to you.

Still, many people set goals on January 1st. Some common choices are becoming healthier, becoming more organized, or living a more adventurous life.

What goals will you be working towards in this new year?

It’s ALWAYS a good idea to reflect on your goals, so you can regularly make sure you’re heading directly towards them.

These 3 steps to achieve your new year’s resolutions will ensure consistent success, whether you’re a year-round goal-setter or a “New Year, new you” type of person:

1. Manage your expectations.

It’s been said that less than 10% of people actually accomplish their New Years Resolutions.

Still, we often set very strict and rigid expectations in place, only to lose steam or quit entirely when our progress slips even the slightest bit.

If you’re often hard on yourself, lighten up a bit by managing your expectations.

Change doesn’t happen in an instant. It requires consistently focused actions over a long period of time – throughout this entire new year and every year that follows.

Rather than setting yourself up for a sprint in January, break your big goals down into small, incremental steps. Be willing to adjust rather than quitting when challenges come up. Moving through failure is an important part of accomplishing your goals.

What is your goal? Why is that important to you? How will you know that you’ve succeeded? What will you feel?

Not only does understanding your intention keep you motivated, but it also helps you set more deeply satisfying and realistic goals for yourself.

Let’s take getting healthy, for example. Do you want to lose weight and feel lighter? Is feeling at home in your body the priority? Or, is there something specific you want to achieve through improving your health – like living a longer life or being in a more loving relationship?

Each of these versions of “becoming healthier” come with completely different action plans.

Identifying exactly what you want and why that’s important to you can keep youfocused while helping you identify the most direct route to truly fulfilling success.

We do not create long-lasting results for ourselves in a vacuum, despite the fact that we often value our independence highly in our society. This point of view can keep us disconnected from each other.

Going it alone ensures that our results will come much slower and more painfully than they would have, had we provided ourselves with the proper support.

It’s essential to consult with loved ones, mentors, and specialists when the way forward doesn’t look clear. You WILL encounter obstacles while making changes in your life. Enlist people you trust who can support you when that happens.

When you set goals and move towards them every single day, nothing will be out of your reach.

I’m here to help.

If you’re looking for personalized guidance, support, or just to continue the conversation, feel free to email me any time – info@briannamcinerny.com. I’d love to connect with you.

Generosity is readily giving more of oneself – more time, more money, more kindness – than is necessary or expected considering the situation. I’m sure you know, generosity is an extremely desirable quality to have.

It also has a dark side.

Unfortunately, the desire to give weighs heavily on some generous people when they don’t practice giving to themselves first and foremost. Generous people often give to others, to their own detriment.

The pressure we feel to be generous often doubles during the holiday season.

For instance… We donate money or buy gifts before accounting for our own financial well-being.

We always say “yes” to new responsibilities or events, when we’re already worn paper thin.

We force smiles and niceties with people and family members who don’t make us feel good, just to maintain the status quo.

When we neglect our own needs like this for the benefit of others, we nurture a breeding ground for resentment, anger, and eventually burnout, when we have absolutely nothing left to give.

This is not the spirit of generosity. True generosity happens naturally – inspired and overflowing from a full cup, without creating any hardship whatsoever for the giver.

To the contrary – true acts of giving always carry an element of receiving too. Contributing to someone else’s life from an inspired, loving place always feels genuinely enjoyable, abundant, and fulfilling for everyone involved.

When you’re NOT enjoying the process of giving – when you feel like you don’t have a choice, or you feel that you never get anything back in return – that’s a sure sign you’ve stepped into the territory of self-induced self-sacrifice.

So let’s take a step back, shall we?

These tips will help your giving spirit thrive throughout the holiday season.

1. Take 100% responsibility for the way you feel. Let other people take 100% responsibility for the way they feel, too. Your #1 job is to care for yourself – let that be your priority. It’s not your job to make other people happy. It’s not up to anyone else to make you happy, either. People will survive and thrive without you, or they’ll learn how with practice. That is a very, very good thing.

2. Learn what your “full body yes” feels like, then follow it. Close your eyes, take deep breaths, connect with your body, connect with the wisest part of you, and ask – what does a full body “yes” feel like? Say NO to everything that doesn’t elicit that solid YES reaction. You’ll still have plenty of amazing things to fill your calendar, especially during this time of year. Your time is valuable and in high demand – spend time following your “yes”, not pushing down your “no”.

3. Only commit to projects, parties, and people when you KNOW you will deliver. Everything on your to-do list will subtly drain your energy until it’s complete, so be deliberate, be selective, and be realistic. Don’t stretch yourself too thin. You don’t owe an explanation to anyone – you’re allowed to say “no” (or at least stay temporarily non-committal).

When you give generously to yourself first, a joyful generosity towards others will naturally emerge – because nothing feels better than making an impact in the life of a loved one or someone who needs it.

You know that feeling when you’ve just accomplished something you really care about?

Or the experience of having a brilliant idea?

When you feel passionate about what you’re working towards, with plenty of energy to get the necessary work done, what’s that like for you?

All of these things are involved when you’re aligned with your creative flow.

Think of a person you know who’s very healthy, happy, and successful. Do you think they’re connected to themselves like this?

You can hear it in someone’s voice when they’re in this creative state. Their voice has a whole different resonance to it, doesn’t it?

You can see the glow of their skin and the light in their eyes, regardless of their age, size, or gender. They turn heads when they walk into a room. They seem to attract opportunities effortlessly, they seem carefree and confident. They feel comfortable in their own skin, and everyone around them can see it.

Not only do these people feel inspired themselves, but they inspire everyone around them.

They’re easy to remember, but they can be difficult to emulate… even if you’re usually one of them.

When you’re feeling out of sync with those amazing creative juices, give these steps a try:

1. Move your body. Get out of your head, and into your body. Slow down & stretch. Get up and go for a walk. Focus on your breath. In a locked, uninterrupted space, breathe and bring your conscious awareness to the sensations in different parts of your body. Explore how those sensations feel. This can be uncomfortable to do, but it’s almost guaranteed to move you past whatever’s blocking you. If emotions surface, just let it happen & let it pass. Everything is normal.

2. Get back to the basics. Who are you? Where do you come from? Where do you want to go? What’s important to you? What are you really passionate about? Take some time to reflect on these questions. Journal about them if you’d like. Cancel your plans if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed. Unplug from your devices, stop checking social media, let go of what others think. Watch some favorite movies or listen to your favorite music. Remember, anything is possible. If you can believe it, you can achieve it.

3. Connect with others. Who’s someone who never fails to bring out the best in you? Reach out to them. Brainstorm your thoughts & ideas with someone else, so you can get out of your own head and use the feedback from others. When we’re open to collaboration, we can take each other’s ideas to the next level, and we can have fun while we do it. Incorporating different perspectives makes for dynamic success.

When you reach that extraordinary creative connection with yourself, remember how much you deserve it. Be ready to repeat the process over and over again, as long as you live. Don’t forget to enjoy every second of the ride.

Desires often get a bad reputation for being frivolous & nonsensical, dangerous to indulge. But, honestly, when we’re not able to look closely at our desires on a moment to moment basis and freely step into accessing desires that come to us, we usually end up repressing them & misunderstanding them entirely – which is a problem, because desires serve a pretty important purpose in our lives. When you CAN examine your desires, there is generally a way to fulfill them immediately, without making any changes to your life or compromising any of your relationships – most importantly, without compromising your relationship with yourself. Give this video a watch & let me know what you think.

I’ll be taking a break from Tuesday Musings, probably for the rest of 2017, definitely for the next few weeks! Don’t worry… get connected here & “like” my facebook page – there will be plenty of content coming through to hold you over. Please, email me & tell me what topics you’d like to hear about once these come back!! – info@briannamcinerny.com. Love you all, & talk soon.

Unfortunately, with busy streets, busy schedules, & even busier minds, silence is also a rare commodity these days.

We’re surrounded by noise from automobiles & other people & screaming children. We hear the squeals of public transportation and buzzing from crowds, classrooms, conferences, concerts & cities all around us. Even when the noise quiets, it’s normal to be stuck on overdrive with a mind that races and expands to fill the empty space. It’s becoming harder & harder to shut off.

Finding silence today is not easy. It takes intention & persistence. Still, making an effort to find silence is important, and it’s worth it.

Sitting in silence for awhile is like pushing a reset button on our brains. Silence can help us find more clarity, & greater connection to ourselves & others & the world around us. It helps us spark creativity, & it even regenerates our brain cells.

When we carve out quiet time for ourselves, we tune into our senses & calm our bodies. We feel safer, centered, & grounded. We can sort out the clutter that keeps us scattered. When we’re comfortable with silence in each passing moment, we can become a grounding force for everyone around us, to truly impact our world & everyone in it.

Valuable silence gives us the spaciousness we desire. When we swim in silence often enough, we learn we’re already whole, & we already have access to everything we need. Silence helps us slow time & get more out of our every effort. Silence makes room for the reflection & insight we need to move forward effectively & consistently towards our goals.

Are you ready to make silence a priority in your life? Here are a few steps to get started:

Calm your mind. Quiet the noise between your ears first. If your mind moves very fast, short guided meditations might be a great place for you to start. You can work up to 5 minutes of silent time, slowly making silence a habit & scheduling it into your day. Get comfortable having solo conversations with yourself, & get curious about the thoughts & feelings that come up during silence. Everything is normal.

Unplug. Turn off your phone & other technology. Seek out nature. Nature might not be 100% silent, but it’s a lot quieter than a busy street or a crowded workplace, & gorgeous natural scenery can compliment quiet time beautifully. Go for a walk in a quiet area & opt for silence over headphones. Focus on your body & your breath while you try to keep your thoughts slow & to a minimum. Afterwards, notice how much fuller you feel.

Get support. Let your people know what you’re up to, & ask clearly for you need to make your silent time possible. Make a sign to hang on your door when you don’t want to be interrupted. Invest in noise blocking headsets, silent retreats, & outside accountability as you make this the new normal. Make silence a family event, knowing that growing the habit of silence with your loved ones is providing them with a tool for success & happiness that they can use for life.

You may want a pen & paper to record insights you receive during your silent time. Don’t re-join the noise until you feel refreshed & inspired to act. Congratulations on prioritizing silence for yourself moving forward – you definitely deserve it.

If you’ve attempted removing even ONE chemical from your life – from your food, your cleaning supplies, or a daily habit like nicotine, alcohol, sugar, or caffeine – you know that cutting down on chemical consumption is way easier said than done.

It’s a growing trend to minimize our exposure to chemicals, for benefits such as weight loss, more energy, mental clarity, or better skin. Minimizing our chemical consumption is often an important part of providing for our body. Loving our body helps us feel mentally whole, which impacts every area of our lives.

Still, the process is often filled with maddening obstacles. Temptation & exposure to chemicals is everywhere we look. Attempts to cut back are often full of mood swings, feeling drained, & terrible headaches… not to mention endless trial & error with new products that aren’t always worth their salt. Not to mention the time & learning it takes to prepare chemical-free food… it’s all enough stress to make anyone lose their cool.

There has to be a better way! Cutting out chemicals is supposed to feel good, right? We’re looking to gain clarity here, not lose our minds. Try these three steps to get you through:

Don’t judge. Go easy on yourself & keep it simple. Tell yourself that your efforts are good enough. Allow yourself to do what feels good for you, and accept every part of your personality that comes up along the way. Judging yourself harshly regarding your progress will only push you back into the arms of the chemicals you’re trying to avoid. When the pressure comes off, it can be much easier for the habit to fade out naturally.

Substitute. Figure out what need that chemical has been filling for you, and brainstorm some other ways to fill the need when it hits. Write your ideas down on paper & consider this your go-to action plan when cravings or urges hit. Are you looking for energy? Try drinking some water or going for a walk. Are you looking for sweetness or connection? Seek out a hug, or give a compliment to someone you love. Drink teas, find something to fidget with, take a bath. Try making your own bathing & cleaning products. Find alternatives that really work for you.

Get support. This is truly the biggest key to lasting success. Surround yourself with people who support you, & support yourself by avoiding tempting situations at first. Get a therapist or coach to talk to. Surround yourself with people making similar changes in their life. Find books that share stories & advice from people who have successfully done what you’re attempting. Learn how to ask for what you want from others. Connecting with other people for support is one of the strongest things you can do, and when mentally whole people come together for a purpose, amazing things are possible.

Above all else, make these changes for yourself – because you want to. Focus on the outcomes you’re trying to achieve. And – always know you’re good enough & you deserve love, right now, regardless of what chemicals you choose to consume.

It is very natural to compare ourselves to other people, & to feel like we’re left out as an outsider somehow. Feelings like this… “I’m not enough” or “Nobody wants me” or “I’m unlovable” are all related to core fears that we ALL experience as humans. On a primal level, we can’t survive if we’re separated from our tribe, so these feelings & fears developed to keep us safe on a very basic level. They’re actually worth celebrating. They have good intentions. Still, you deserve to feel good enough right now, & your happiness & success depend on it. You’re unique, & you offer something to the world that no-one else does.

There’s not another person on this Earth who’s exactly like you, so there’s really no use comparing. We’re all on our own individual path, and every single one of us is an essential part of the whole, even when we’re only a small part of the picture. On that note, this week’s Tuesday Musings offers some suggestions you can use to overcome comparison & start feeling good enough right now. I’ll be back with more on July 11th, talking about the first component of mental wholeness – Acceptance. Make sure to leave a comment below & tell me what you think! Thanks for watching.