Meaningful questions UC Berkeley students ask

When we’re walking around campus in our coats, sipping some hot chocolate in this cold weather or even enjoying our short time in a warm shower, chances are we’ve often slipped into a period of observing and questioning our quirky campus. Even though it’s almost the end of midterm season, we still have trivial, yet meaningful questions left unanswered. We at the Clog put together a list of these questions that the average UC Berkeley student might ask.

Is Berkeley time actually real time and the rest of California is just ten minutes early?

Do the Golden Bear Cafe’s chicken strips still exist, just in a secret dimension?

Are our GSIs more like awkward friends or low-key professors?

Is Oski’s identity super secretive because he’s just Chancellor Dirks in disguise?

When is “Netflix and chill” really just “Netflix” and “chill?”

Are all Berkeley residents really just UC Berkeley alumni who have separation issues with our beautiful campus?

Was Dwinelle Hall originally constructed to be a pseudo-Hunger Games setup to see how quickly students could escape from a maze?

Why is boba called boba in Berkeley when it’s called bubble tea in other places?

Is Alexander Coward secretly a philosophy or public policy professor?

Is UC Berkeley even that liberal?

Why is there a Mexican restaurant in the “Asian Ghetto?”

Why did we take so long to figure out that there’s a coffee shop on top of Dwinelle Hall?

Will the Campanile bells ring to the beat of Drake’s “Hotline Bling” 50 years from now?

Why do the deer walking around Foothill not flinch in the presence of walking humans?

Are there more squirrels than students on the UC Berkeley campus?

Why is Late Night not open for Friday and Saturday nights?

Why are midterms called “midterms” if they happen every other week?

Why are club applications so long and extensive?

Why do we think Northside is so far from Southside when it really isn’t?