Report: NFL Teams to Gauge Michael Sam’s Willingness to Wear a Blindfold in the Shower

Michael Sam’s NFL future may ultimately come down to how well he does at the NFL Combine, particularly in interviews with prospective employers. According to several NFL sources, there is one question teams want Sam to answer.

“There is going to be an adjustment period for him, and there needs to be some compromise on his end, too,” said one NFL GM about the former Missouri defensive end who recently revealed he is gay. “One question I’m going to put to him is if he’s willing to wear a blindfold in the team shower. At least for his first season while his teammates figure out if they can trust him.”

A scout for another NFL team, who also wished to speak anonymously, said his team would seriously consider taking Sam in the 4th or 5th Round if they can be sure he won’t check out his teammates.

“I’m wearing my tightest polyester coach shorts to the interview, for one,” said the scout. “If he checks out my package, I’ll have all the answers I need. Beyond that, yeah, we’ll ask him if he’ll be willing to wear a shower blindfold. Or maybe one of those cones you put around dog’s heads. We’d just have to make sure the water drains out the bottom so he doesn’t drown.”

Sources close to Sam say that he will not agree to wear a blindfold in the shower.

“He showered with his teammates at Missouri last year and they went 12-2,” said a friend. “These fears about him are ridiculous.”

But an NFL assistant coach says no one can really know what the locker room dynamics of having a gay player will be like in the NFL.

“Sam’s supporters keep pointing out how Missouri went 12-2,” said the coach. “So what? Maybe they would have gone 14-0 if he had stayed in the closet. His teammates could have been off their games in those two losses because they were rattled by Sam checking them out. Do NFL teams really want a player who single-handedly causes two losses every season?”