Is the U.S. Waging a ‘War on Moms’?

By Sue Shellenbarger

The story that opens the new book “The War on Moms,” would be a heart-stopper for any parent. After suffering a stroke in utero, a baby is born prematurely, with a hole in her heart, to a middle-class Long Island couple. Five-figure medical bills swamp the couple’s woefully inadequate health coverage. The mother loses her job because she has to take so much time off work. The hard-working young family spirals downward into poverty.

Many such compelling stories can be found in journalist Sharon Lerner’s book, which offers a refreshing take on the hard-core economic issues facing middle- and lower-middle class families. (While the title focuses on women and Ms. Lerner addresses family problems in the context of women’s historic advances in the workforce, she points out that all the problems affect families as a whole.)

You will have heard before about the issues she addresses: Working parents pay more annually for good child care than for a year’s tuition at a public university. Only 42% of working mothers in the U.S. stay home for even three months after childbirth. Pregnant women have great difficulty getting health insurance right when they need it most.

I approached this book with skepticism, thinking I had read it all before.

But Ms. Lerner’s examples are fresh, reflecting the recession’s crushing effects, and her treatment of these important work-family problems is concise and forceful. Her argument: Women need paid maternity leave, good affordable child care, health coverage and flexible work options. Even the three months’ paid leave some higher-earning women are able to take is too short for many, and too many other women can barely eke out six weeks at home with their newborns. And heaven help the middle- or lower-income mother who gives birth to a child with disabilities or health problems so severe as to require full-time parental care.

The family-friendly safety net in the U.S., in fact, works better for high-paid professionals than for the poor: Twice as many high-earning parents have paid days off to care for sick children, compared with those on the low-wage end of the scale, Heymann has found. That is because most work-family supports here are based on employer rather than public policies.

Business groups have fought proposed expansion of family leave or paid sick days, countering that such measures are too expensive. Some employers, in fact, are cutting back the short-term disability pay that is the foundation for most paid maternity leave in this country, pressuring many mothers to rush back to work even sooner.

While critics might argue that women have a choice about how they manage the juggle, Ms. Lerner documents the fact that only a privileged few women really have a choice about whether to work–affluent women with high-earning husbands or accumulated wealth. The rest, who must work, have too few choices that usually are limited to rigid, long-hours demands that keep them away from their families far more than they would like.

Readers, do you regard U.S. policies as the equivalent of “a war on moms?” Do you think more needs to be done to provide a safety net for mothers? Or is an expansion of family-supportive policies too much to expect at a time when government is swamped in debt, taxes are rising and employers are struggling to provide jobs?

Comments (5 of 155)

really - why do we continue to lead people to believe that it is only the women that can raise a child....... dad's participate to you know.

4:29 pm June 18, 2010

P Brick wrote :

This isn't a war on moms, it's a war on families. It used to be in the past that only the wealthy could afford to let other people raise their children, now in order to survive almost everyone has to rely on other people to raise their children, and then people wonder why our young people are all running wild, sexting each other and having sex before they even hit their teens. As a country we need to take a good look at how we are perpetuating our culture, if you aren't part of the solution, you are part of the problem!

3:05 pm June 17, 2010

Michelle wrote :

While I feel for families who experience financial difficulties, I am a little skeptical of calling it a "war on moms" especially when the solutions include more government spending and regulation. Instead of seeing the western European nations as the model for healthy families, it seems like many of those socialist-leaning countries indeed could be said to be waging a "war on moms" as evidenced by the fact that few women in those countries want to have more than 1 or 2 children, if any. My own family falls into the "lower middle class" category where mothers supposedly don't have the means to care for their children. We have lived off of one income by choice. Even though at times we could have qualified for a lot of government services, the reality is we are not suffering want. We have had to make choices--old cars, a small house, less activities for our children--but believe they are worth it so that I can stay at home with our children. In the US, families have more choices. If the government starts paying for "quality childcare" what happens to families like mine who are on the borderline financially? We can't afford to pay more taxes to support the feminist ideal that others want to pursue. I am not saying that there aren't real needs out there and sad stories. Let's try to help those families without creating government solutions that squash the hardworking families who believe their children need more than 6 months or a year of paid maternity leave--but need a mother in the home. And let's not become another Greece, where the government keeps everyone fat and happy, but then crumbles because it isn't sustainable. Good government policy should support families having the means to take care of themselves. A healthy economy is a good priority for government. The desire to make good life choices is something that needs to be instilled by families, churches, and community organizations--the government can neither make our choices for us, nor be responsible for mopping up the wreckage caused by bad choices.

11:27 am June 15, 2010

Melissa Josephs wrote :

Of course the U.S. should enact a paid parental leave policy since this would benfit our society as a whole and especially employers, who benefit by their employees and others continuing to populate the planet with healthy, future consumers. As for enacting such a policy at this time,, remember that the minimum wage was passed during the Great Depression. - when it was needed most..

About The Juggle

The Juggle examines the choices and tradeoffs people make as they juggle work and family. The site provides readers with news, insight and tips on parenting, workplace issues, commuting, caregiving and other issues busy readers with families face. It is also a place for readers to share and compare their own work-and-family experiences and to seek advice and recommendations. The Juggle is includes regular contributions from other staffers at the Journal. Contact the Juggle with ideas or suggestions at thejuggle@wsj.com