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Boss’s Day At A Paranormal Investigations Firm

The generous administrative assistants and wonderful supernatural support staff here at Mystic Investigations threw the executive’s a surprise Boss’s Banquet in honor of Boss’s Day. We donate a small amount of every case we solve to a General Employee Cash Fund. It’s a cash safe in our place that the employees can collectively vote to use for anything they like within our facility without coming to us bosses for permission. It comes in handy when they want to throw a surprise party but sometimes they’ll buy something frivolous like that Pac-Man arcade game console in the employee lounge. Although I guess I’ve played the thing just as much as anyone else.

A Surprise Party Was Afoot

At Noon we all expected to go to the cafeteria as usual, and instead, we were greeted by all our employees leading us up to our rooftop garden to enjoy a lavish lunch amid the warm windy sun surrounded by fall foliage. This was an issue for our Executive-Vice President Drake Alexander since he’s a vampire who bursts into flames if he stays in the holy Sun too long. Unfortunately, not everyone on staff knows this nor believes it when they hear it. Interestingly some people who work here haven’t a clue they’re at ground zero in the world of the supernatural, and they explain away every enchanted event they may see. This is quite common for the average person who can’t deal with the heart-stopping fear of paranormal perplexities even at the sub-conscious level. The dashing 740 something Scotsman Drake didn’t want to let the enamored employees down. Especially the ladies who constantly fawn over him. So he dipped into his emergency reserve of Gnomes Blood. It’s difficult to come by but it’s one of the few things that will allow a vampire to exist in the sun for at least a few hours. Since Gnomes are creatures of darkness it’s unknown why their blood grants vampires access to the daylight.

An Alluring Autumn Nymph Materializes

There was some minor paranormal activity during our Boss’s Day celebration. As a kaleidoscopic flood of fall foliage fluttered around us majestically an Autumn Nymph, aka low-level Earth-based seasonal nature deity, materialized from the Paradise Plane to join us for lunch. Or more exactly to join Drake who was only sparsely eating bits of food by dousing it with blood from his trusty pocket flask. It’s one of the few ways a vampire can consume real food. Some people thought it was ketchup or barbecue sauce! The crimson-haired beauty, dressed in nothing but fall frondescence of all colors, was named Magenta. She was replacing another Nymph as the Curator Of Autumn in this particular localized area. As Magenta partook of food, and drink her tanned skin slightly shimmered in the sunlight. Thankfully not to a Twilight vamp degree! She had briefly introduced herself to our resident Demi-Mermaid Witch Rebecca Abernathy but Magenta only had eyes from Drake. Oddly enough a fair number of supernatural beings on the good side of the spectrum are attracted to vampires even when they’re evil. In this case, of course, Drake fights on the side of righteousness in a world teeming with denizens of darkness!

A Baby Ghost Dwells Within Mystic Investigations

After the two-hour fall feast with a spectacular roof view of the colorful countryside, it was time to get back to the supernatural investigations crime-fighting game! Magenta and Drake mysteriously disappeared for about thirty minutes. Drake finally appeared again and said Magenta had left. As he walked past us we noticed a red maple leaf stuck in his wavy raven hair. 🙂 Rebecca came into my office, and said Magenta had bid her farewell while informing us we had a ghost living in our offices! There surely wasn’t one sign of a ghost which is unusual. It’s even more unusual that the supernatural members of our team didn’t feel it’s presence. I called upon our Ghost Hunter Rob Edmunds & Psychic Julia Hathaway to deal with the issue. We discovered that the ghost was, in fact, the ghost of a newborn baby! After focusing on the tiny ghost Julia got a psychic vision of the baby girl being born and abandoned by its young mother who was shamed into hiding her pregnancy. Apparently, she had planned to anonymously leave a message with someone to get the child but the Mother was kidnapped by malevolent mountain men. After that, she was never to be seen again! Unfortunately, it was irrelevant since the baby died of birth complications almost immediately.

A Ghostly Baby Is Released Into The Arms Of A Heavenly Angel

It seems the baby girl ghost had been lying in the woods for well over 150 years, and then in our facility once it was built on that spot. Generally, a baby will go straight to Heaven when it dies. Although the usual weakness of a baby’s metaphysical-astral body coupled with the spot being a mystical Native American ritual site somehow trapped, and cloaked the ghostly child. Julia indicated the baby was in some manner of happy perpetual womb dream unaware of the outside environment. With the help of an ancient talisman, Rebecca cast a spell to briefly materialize the metaphysical baby into a physical form made of solidified photons. In essence a child of pure light. Julia used her mental powers to allow the baby to perceive biological physical sensations as they brought her out into the sunlight to finally experience the real world. Some of us took turns holding the miracle baby until Julia, and Rebecca saw a white light appear. Julia carried the baby into it, and she had tears of happiness in her eyes. Rebecca became emotional as well while witnessing an extremely enchanted event! For both of them saw an Angel take possession of the child. An Angel who was its Mother! They say there is no supernatural sight more breathtaking than that of an Angel. And of course the indescribable, and unique joy of a Mother being reunited with her child after well over a century! Happy Boss’s Day To All And To All A Productive 9 To 5!

The Return Of The Supernatural Slender Man!The sinister Slenderman appeared in a flash of eerie emerald light in the midst of the nocturnal Mystical Forest of Woodland Springs, Colorado. This most malicious monster from a parallel dimension teleports with ease when fully powered up on the life force of the innocent children he preys upon. Of course in their case, he merely kidnaps them and holds some semblance of reverence for their magical purity as his dimension contains no kids. Slender Man’s real nefarious nature flies free when mentally torturing adults, and instilling the Slender Sickness upon them. He relishes driving them into a paranormal madness that leads to the manipulation of their minds to murder others, and then commit suicide. Rarely does he directly kill his intended target. He gains more pleasure in being the puppet master of unwitting humans in his real-life chess game of doom! However, when attacked he will eradicate all who dare to defy him! Slender Man was sentenced to Earth by his own people for unknown crimes many centuries ago, and now his only mission in life is to prey upon us!

The Slender Man walked in a ghoulishly graceful manner about the dark lush forest teeming with normal, and paranormal life whose sounds could be heard bellowing about the many evergreens, and minority deciduous trees. The light of the half Moon filtering through the tree canopy revealing the pale faceless figure dressed in a black business suit with a black tie that is known to turn scarlet when his prey has been targeted for termination. As a limited shapeshifter Slenderman also grows a plethora of sharp tentacles that can be deadly to anyone! The foliage of the forest crunched beneath his shiny black dress shoes causing a chorus of crickets to fall quiet leaving only the sound of the warm summer winds rustling the trees to, and fro. Two gentle water nymphs, aka minor nature deities, swam au naturel giggling with glee in a slow flowing stream. Slender crossed a small bridge over the stream staring at the metaphysical beauties with his unique vision devoid of actual physical eyes. Both lovely ladies were startled by his ominous presence and quickly shifted into non-corporeal form appearing only as transparent specters. He left them behind knowing, at least in his mind, that he was the apex predator in this particular neck of the woods.

Slenderman’s earless head translated sound waves into information that told him humans were nearby. Just then two vampires pounced from a thick block of brush briefly surprising him. The male and female vampires had been waiting for a human to come into the forest by themselves and were eager for a quick bloody meal. They neglected to get a good look at the Slender Man as they immediately bit into his neck, and shoulder from behind. However, they stopped the instant they ingested the first line of his vile tasting pitch black blood. Slenderman quickly shook them off with his supernatural strength. This caused the demonic duo to fly into two different tree trunks. One tree fell down loudly as the female vampire screamed,”Oh crap it’s the Slender Man!” Both were instantly ill and weakened by his poisonous blood that would give them the Slender Man Sickness for all eternity. Slender grew a black tentacle that went around the male’s neck, and then beheaded him with glee! This caused the vamp to burst into unholy violet colored flames. Nothing but a pile of ash was left while the female vampire lay helplessly on the ground crying,”Please don’t kill me! I want to live forever! I can be of use to you!” Slender Man knew he had complete mental control of the vampire now that his extra-dimensional blood was in her forever. He decided to let her go as a potential useful puppet in the future. He temporarily suppressed the Slender Man sickness in her as if nothing had ever happened, and she ran away into the night at super speed.

Slender neared the edge of the treeline where a crowd was gathered on Luminary Lakejust as the iridescent Independence Day fireworks began to blast across the Moon and starlit skies. The last embers of the sunset were nothing but a faint blue light on the western horizon. Slender viewed the pyrotechnics as mindless and was only interested in the children at their parent’s safe side viewing the spectacle. He could clearly make out their unique energy auras that no normal human could witness. Something struck him about a young five-year-old boy playing near the waters edge with a golden retriever. He knew the child would be an ideal source of mystical energy as he was starting to run low on paranormal power.

The Slender Man shapeshifted into an almost snake-like form as he slithered on his stomach along the ground into the lake. He eyed the boy from beneath the water’s surface but the golden retriever entered the water barking wildly trying to warn everyone of impending danger. Slender then shot up a tentacle and dragged the dog underwater casting him out flying into the center of the lake. Thankfully the dog wasn’t harmed and swam back to shore later on. A good number of people in the crowd took notice of the catapulted dog and began screaming as Slenderman sprang up out of the water, and grabbed the child into his slimy slender arms. Everyone was shrieking in sheer terror at the sight of the faceless Slenderman! The boys parents lunged forth but Slender sprang through the crowd at what seemed like light speed knocking several people over. Both Slender and boy disappeared into the dark foreboding forest with his cries for help fading to nothing in the great distance! The rockets red glare flashing everywhere on a most unfortunate fourth of July!

The Woodland Springs Police were called to the scene of the boy kidnapped by Slender Man in front of a shocked crowd of people enjoying the July 4th fireworks still bursting colorfully in the air. As usual cantankerous Police Chief Spencer Cantrell refused to believe in the world of the paranormal. He called every eyewitness in the crowd a bunch of hysterical July 4th drunks as he noted the coolers full of beer, and wine coolers strewn about. Thankfully a true supernatural believer in law enforcement heard the call on the emergency radio. Comanche County Sheriff Blake Maverick raced to the scene with sirens sounding, and lights flashing. Upon arrival at the park, the Sheriff ordered the useless police to leave the area. After a brief shouting match amid the loud booms of the fireworks. Cantrell and his men sped away down the road after the Sheriff finally threatened to arrest them all for obstruction of justice. After getting brief statements from the witnesses Maverick called Xavier Remington, President of Mystic Investigations on his cell phone. That would be me!

I was across Luminary Lake on the opposite shore in the backyard of Remington Manor. My palatial estate lies on the edge of the Enchanted Woodland. A mostly deciduous wooded area as opposed to the mostly dense evergreen foliage of the Mystical Forest. It’s also not as full of paranormal life. Most of the Mystic Investigations team was at my house for my Fourth Of July party which naturally had an excellent view of the fireworks over the lake. Everyone was there except for my Executive Vice-President Drake Alexander who was in London helping a secret agent friend in MI7 to identify the Devil. The Devil had been seen with The Plague Doctor at Stonehenge. Drake, a vampire, is one of the few people to actually see the Devil in his current human-like form. His British friend decided Drake would be indispensable in helping to identify and locate the Devil along with ascertaining his intent on the British Isles. Also as a vampire, Drake has demonic based DNA that allows him to sense when the Devil is near. Since Slender Man has recently worked with the Devil, despite being a centuries old loner, we’re thankful he wasn’t anywhere near Woodland Springs. It’s also probably a good thing Drake isn’t here since his last encounter with Slender caused him to drink his blood. Despite cleansing him of the Slender Sickness it’s suggested that such extra-dimensional blood can never be completely eradicated which leaves the door open for Drake possibly being controlled by the Slenderman.

Most of us were near my boat dock ready to go out on to the lake when Julia Hathaway, our psychic, got a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. She suddenly blurted out,”Slenderman!” I then replied,”What the hell?” She then had a brief vision, and told us,”OMG Slenderman kidnapped a child!” Unfortunately, when it comes to Slender there is a psychic delay which is why she got the vision too late. Everyone hopped into my speed boat except for Rebecca Abernathy, my girlfriend, a white witch, and a Demi-Mermaid. She was already wearing a bikini since it was a warm night. So all Rebecca had to do is kick off her sandals, and dive into the dark waters reflecting the pyrotechnic skyscape. A raised line of water with waves radiating outward could be seen racing across the lake at superhuman speeds. I revved up the boat and followed in fast pursuit. Ahead the opposite shore grew closer while seeing Rebecca launch from the water to the side of the crowd so only a few children saw her. That’s when my cell phone rang, and Blake said he needed Mystic Investigations. Rebecca smiled and tapped him on the shoulder. He said,”Wow that’s quick service!” Our boat came ashore, and our team got to work.

We assured the parents we would find their boy and bring him home safely. Although in my mind I was thinking the worst since our encounter with Slender Man last summer. We barely got away with our lives! Thankfully Slenderman does not hurt children. Rather he absorbs their innocent magical energies. Energies Slender needs to stay at peak power. The iridescent kaleidoscope of glittering glory still roared across the skies while trekking into the Mystical Forest. The Sheriff stayed behind with the clearly shocked crowd. That’s why she got the vision of the kidnapping too late, and couldn’t sense that Slender was in Woodland Springs.

Julia Hathaway and Ex-Navy Seal Hunter Jackson lead the team forging forth into the foreboding darkness. I was hoping Julia could sense the supernatural Slender but his mind works differently than any other being paranormal or otherwise. We lucked out that Slenderman was walking rather than teleporting so Hunter could track his trail. Perhaps Slenderman has an encounter with some powerful enemies, and his energy was drained. If he teleported it would be next to impossible to find him as you could be anywhere on Earth. Our luck ran out when the trail ended in a babbling brook.

Rebecca then gently seemed to be talking to thin air as she said,”Oh sweet Nymphs of the babbling brook please reveal yourself to us.” Suddenly two extremely beautiful women wearing virtually nothing but green leafy vines, and flowers appeared first as apparitions. Then they were fully physical as they emerged from the cool waters. They said Slenderman scared them as he walked directly down the brook that turns into a stream, and then empties into a large pond past the treeline. The Nymphs sensed he was growing weaker from a previous attack. From various reports over the past 10 years, we gathered that Slender needs to partake of a certain ritual to gather energy from children. So he had to get the child to some mystical location.

We bid the Nymphs farewell and split up. Rebecca activated her Mystic Sphere, a translucent pink levitating energy bubble that forms around her. I joined her along with Zack Powers, our bionic boy wonder, and we flew away. Unfortunately, there’s only so many who can fit inside so the rest of the team went on foot down the brook into the larger stream. Rebecca directed her sphere toward the large pond while communing with the supernaturals of the Mystical Forest who could help her locate Slender.

Some hours later Rebecca managed to find Slenderman’s location in an underground cavern that lies in between the Earth’s surface and the Underworld. The Mystic Investigations team gathered various supplies and trekked downward. What we found was quite shocking and we may be the first to make this finding and survive. We happened upon one of Slenderman’s hidden locations around the world where he keeps children in a stasis state to mine them for enchanted energies. These locations tend to be on Mother Earth energy centers. In this case, it’s The Heart Of The Mystical Forest. Interestingly enough, it seems a new child must be added regularly to in essence recharge the grander metaphysical battery. These kids remain in an ageless dream state for years, decades, and even centuries in some cases. The dreams need a new mind to invigorate the imaginations of everyone. This thereby stokes the supernatural energies Slender needs to power up his spooky ass!

Rebecca, Julia, and Drake couldn’t sense Slenderman’s presence but he had recently been there. We sneaked into the large cavern cautiously. It was lit by eerie colored orbs hanging from the ceiling. They encompassed all the colors of the rainbow but in a deeply unfamiliar way. At least a hundred kids were lying on flat raised stones evenly spaced about the cavern. Closest to us was the kidnapped boy as identified by a photo his parents gave us! Cryptozoologist and Doctor Ashley Abercrombie examined the boy and determined he was in what appeared to be a coma like state with rampant REM sleep in progress. The rest of the kids appeared the same. As some of us milled further through the young crowd the clothing on them looked more and more dated. At the far side were kids clearly dressed in clothing from the late 1800’s to early 1900’s! And even a few Native American kids that Julia sensed may have been from the early 1800’s or earlier. Our town Woodland Springs was founded in 1861!

Rebecca attempted various spells along with potions to wake the boy up as Julia tried to enter his mind. All efforts failed. The child was under the diabolical control of Slenderman! We even tried to use Drake’s healing vampire blood to wake him up but it had no effect. We made the decision to take him and everyone we could out of there. We would have Drake hypnotize an army of volunteers to get the rest and then make them forget what they saw. Unfortunately, before we could leave we were blocked by an extremely angry Slenderman at the exit! He psychically forced his bellowing voice into all our heads so loudly it brought us great pain! He screamed,”How dare you enter my sacred temple of innocence! All whose eyes lay upon my domain shall die! Place the children down and prepare to meet your final end you misguided fools!”

The pain subsided and we placed the children on the ground away from us for their protection. Last time we faced Slenderman we barely got away with our lives! Now we were on his home turf and Julia sensed he was powered up from the kid’s energy! We had no chance to attack as he psychically forced so much agony upon us that we all collapsed to the floor! We writhed in pain unable to move. His tentacles began squeezing around us! It seemed our death was imminent! Then it miraculously stopped as we realized Slender was fighting someone in the cave that exited the main cavern. We crawled to it and saw it was the infamous huge stick figure known as The Slenderman Assassin!

It’s believed the Assassin is from Slenderman’s home dimension. A hit-man sent by people he offended outside of the prison sentence on Earth given by his own government. This was the fight that had previously weakened him. It seems the Assassin managed to track him here and now Slender was getting a sweet beat down! As we regained strength we rooted the Assassin on. The two were engaged in an almost mesmerizing shape shifting battle. The sheer force of it was causing the gradual collapse of the cave thereby trapping us in the cavern! There was no way to get past their chaotic battle and the only other way out was another cave that descended into the Underworld of Dark Gods and Demons! All of that was irrelevant as we refused to leave the kids behind!

The cave collapsed on the two shape-shifting fighters as a cloud of dust flew into the cavern of kids. We believed they were dead but we learned much later they weren’t! Although Slenderman must have been weakened or knocked out cold because every kid in the cave awoke deeply confused. It’s no easy task to reassure over a hundred kidnapped kids that all is well in a dark cavern! All we could say is that we would get them out of here and back to their parents. Unfortunately for many, their parents were long dead! In addition, the sudden reappearance of ageless kids would violate The Supernatural Secrecy Pact. Possibly the government would attempt to take the kids for paranormal research!

We reluctantly led the kids down the cave to the Underworld as there was nowhere else to go! We hoped there would be a side cave leading to the surface. Our flashlights lit the dark caverns and we knew the Underworld was at hand when an unholy orange glow began lighting the way. On the cave walls, odd looking moss and flowers began to appear in colors of black and crimson. Suddenly a dark fairy appeared buzzing around us amused by our presence. She giggled as her black wings flapped furiously while trying to bite us. She bit into Drake and was momentarily startled by the vampire blood. Drake was able to catch her in his hand and she begged to be released. Drake said he would if she showed us how to get to the surface. The dark fairy knew the way but it was a perplexing maze to the surface and she would turn to ash if she ventured too far away from the Underworld.

She said she used to be a good field fairy who was lured into a demons dark web due to her lust for power. She regretted her decision and wanted her former status restored. Rebecca said she could cast a spell to temporarily protect her. Then once at the surface, she would call upon local nature deities to attempt to welcome her back into Mother Nature’s fold. Indeed we made it to the surface in the Mystical Forest and the fairy was made whole again by a flock of fairies.

Now we had to figure out what to do with the kids. Julia read their minds along with Rebecca boosting the process with a spell. Only 5 kids could be returned to their parents without supernatural explanation. This included the kidnapped boy that sparked this adventure to begin with. 47 more would have to grow up before being reunited with their families. The rest had families long gone! We loaded them on a chartered jet and flew to North Pole City! Only our friend the Demi-Angel Santa Claus could clean up Slenderman’s mess. We’ve spent every Christmas with Santa since 2011. Something open to those of us in the real paranormal community.

Once there Santa, Mrs. Claus, and several elves greeted us and the children. The once scared and confused kids were now beyond elated at being in the happiest place on Earth! The kids who could never go home would remain forever young in the confines of Santa’s winter wonderland. Santa contemplated utilizing his chronokinetic powers of time travel to everyone home despite the overwhelming power drain. However, the Archangels of heaven frown upon overuse of temporal incursions. Not to mention the fact that Slenderman would just re-kidnap them again! Once he targets a child there’s no changing his mind. Even if that was the case then another child would be lost in their place! The 47 kids who needed to be of a certain age to cast away supernatural suspicions would be allowed to grow up and then decide if they wanted to return home or remain at the North Pole City. If they returned home they would need a permanent glamouring spell cast to further advance their age to the proper level. We placed a big mess in Santa’s hands but he handled with grace as we bid him farewell. We can only hope that Slenderman is someday eradicated from existence!

If this was a television show this would be the song running in the end credits of this particular episode:

With Easter coming upon us soon, we at Mystic Investigations gave thanks for the miraculous resurrection of Rebecca Abernathy, our beloved good witch. Unfortunately the mood at Mystic was anything but joyous for we were mourning a fallen soldier among us. The tragic death of Drake Alexander, by the hand of an extraterrestrial vessel explosion, was fresh in our minds. Julia was closest to him, and she was in charge of planning his funeral. Although we were all involved as it was a quite a task to track down everyone who might have known him and it wasn’t like he kept a big address book with everyone’s name in it. We tried to put the word out worldwide in an effort to contact anyone he might have known over his 700 plus years on this Earth. Frankly he was the last person we ever expected to die. As a vampire he was expected to live for eternity. Sure there’s the sun, and stakes to the heart, but who could ever imagine that the explosion of an alien matter/anti-matter annihilation energy engine would do anyone in. It’s just not that common a death, but I guess someone had to die from that eventually.

We closed our office doors for over a week to mourn, and recover from our battles with the two extraterrestrial space crafts full of little gray monsters. The funeral should have a good turn out since we confirmed the arrival of about 200 of Drakes past acquaintances. A good number of them are vampires or other supernatural beings so we’ll have to be on our toes due to the fact that many of these beings may be evil. Drake was a rare ray of goodness in a world of demonic based living dead forms. Naturally it would be quite impossible to have the funeral at a church due to it being hallowed grounds which can be deadly for such dark beings. Father Tom Davis, our go to guy for exorcisms, and holy water, doesn’t seem to understand why we won’t have the funeral at his sainted Holy Church Of Light. The Father is kind of rigid in his Catholic beliefs so we never told him Drake was a vampire. It’s odd he never suspected anything that time the Father gave Drake a holy cross as a present and Drake’s hand started smoking. The Father is also deeply concerned about Rebecca practicing witchcraft. I know it’s not nice but we kind of laugh at him when he gets all serious about such things. So we’ve decided to hold the funeral at Drake’s home which we affectionately call “Drakes Lair“. Although the official name is “Alexander Manor”. After the service there will be a reception, and then a private reading of the will by myself since I’m executor of his estate. There’s also the matter of many guests who don’t exactly enjoy the sunlight. We decided a Midnight service on Monday April 18th, the day of the full Moon, would be appropriate for a vampire, and those mourning his untimely passing. Julia was hard at work preparing a eulogy while me, Rebecca, and Hunter planned security. We had to be ready for anything just in case the crowd got out of hand. Luckily our white witch Rebecca, had some magical Kryptonite up her sleeve to deal with any paranormal menaces.

Finally the night of the funeral came. It was an unusually warm breezy spring night, and the entire Mystical Forest was brightly illuminated by the full moon. In fact it was the Pink Moon, the moon of Easter, which is known to cause less aggression in werewolves so at least we shouldn’t have those hairy horrors to worry about. Although I doubt any werewolf would have the guts to crash a vampire funeral where dozens of vampires will be in attendance. Drake’s Lair is located deep within the magical Mystical Forest which is teaming with tons of paranormal life for reasons not fully understood. It’s for this reason Drake felt so at home in his fortress of solitude nestled within the majestic pines which also shaded him from the suns incinerating rays. The entire gang was inside the mansion preparing for the guests which would start arriving soon as the witching hour approached. Rebecca, and Elizabeth were preparing refreshments for the funeral reception. Call me crazy but I had no interest in partaking of the cow blood punch. Rebecca magically altered it to supposedly taste like human blood so as not to offend the vampire guests who consider cow blood to be for low-level sub-vampires. Certainly the few drops of fairy and woodland nymph blood should make them happy. Luckily Rebecca has some magical friends who were willing to donate to Drake’s funeral.

The dark limos, and other vehicles began filing into the long cobblestone driveway which wound around an illuminated water fountain at the front entrance to the stately forest manor. Our bionic boy wonder Zack Powers would not be attending high school the next day due to being up all night for the service. Since he was just learning how to drive, we thought having him be the parking attendant was a good idea. Many of the guests had drivers so he merely directed them where to go, but Zack was able to park a few cars himself. We greeted the guests at the door because it was polite, and of course we had to invite them in. As you may already know there’s an ancient global curse in place that prevents vampires from entering a home unless invited. Since I now own the house, as per Drake’s Will, I had to do the inviting. Rebecca stood nearby glaring at the guests as Julia used her psychic powers to inform her of the evil she felt from many of the mourners. Hunter stood in the shadows with his machine gun loaded with silver bullets, while Elizabeth marveled at the spectacle. Ashley, our Cryptozoologist, was also enamored by the plethora of paranormal beings gliding through the doorway. Rob stood nearby wondering if any of the guests would be ghosts. Then all the sudden it seemed as if time stood still as one guest stood out from all the rest. I must admit I felt guilty when I lost all sense of my reality and forgot about Rebecca as I gazed upon one of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen.

Her exotic beauty was beguiling, or maybe it was her vampirical hypnotic stare. She was clearly of middle eastern descent with tanned skin, shoulder length black hair, and dark sapphire blue eyes. Her sensual stare was intense as she smiled seductively, and held out her hand to be kissed as she said,”Good Midnight sir, I am Princess Duanna Sargon of The Akkadian Empire and High Priestess of the Moon God Nanna.” I kissed her hand as I barely heard Rebecca gasp in the background most assuredly with a scowl on her jealous face. I even felt like I had to bow a little since her royal presence was quite intimidating. Especially in the revealing flowing low neckline black satin gown she wore. I then replied,”Pleased to meet you. I’m Xavier Remington, President of Mystic Investigations, and Executor of Drake’s Estate. May I ask how you knew Drake?” She continued to smile and answered,”Yes my dear, You see I’m Drake’s vampirical mother. I brought him across the great expanse of mortal death, and secured him into his immortal life” I then said,”Interesting. He was always secretive about certain things, and never spoke of how he became a vampire. So I guess I should officially invite you in Princess.” She giggled sweetly, and said,”Oh my dear I must insist you call me Duanna” Before I could reply Rebecca pushes her way past me, and walks right up to Duanna to exclaim,”Excuse me Miss Princess but Xavier’s taken so paws off Vampira!” Duanna’s smile turned to a serious stare instantly and she replied,”My my little girl I hope for your sake you can back those words up with something substantial.” Rebecca angrily responded,” Listen bitch I got more power than you could ever imagine, and….” I interrupted,”For the love of God Rebecca this is Drake’s funeral! Show some respect!” Rebecca looked hurt, and said,”Sorry!” as she strode away quickly into the kitchen. I apologized to Duanna because despite Rebecca’s spirited personality, that outburst in this setting was unlike her. Duanna was smiling again, and took my arm insisting I show her to her seat in the grand ballroom. She sat down, and lit up a cigarette. I was surprised because I’d never seen a vampire smoke before but she reminded me that vampires can’t get lung cancer. Although it had a very pleasant almost soothing aroma. I can’t imagine what it’s made of. As I got up to attend to the other guests she grabbed my hand, and looked up at me while softly saying,”Any time you’re ready for a real woman just let me know honey. A lady learns a lot after living over 4000 years.” She then winked at me, and I replied nervously,”Ahhh yes I’ll keep that in mind. Now please excuse me Princess…..I mean Duanna.” I felt like I was under a spell of some type. Clearly she was using her vampirical hypnotic powers on me or perhaps she was just naturally enchanting. It’s hard to say since I never met a 4000 year old woman before.