A woman admires an ornament during the 11th annual Memorial and Tree Lighting Ceremony at the Old Bermuda Inn, Rossville.
(Photo courtesy of Cecilia Scalia-Moron)

STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. - ROSSVILLE - Ten years ago, when John Scalia began hosting his Memorial and Tree Lighting Ceremony at the Old Bermuda Inn in Rossville, just 75 people showed up to place ornaments on one tree in honor of deceased loved ones.

These days, the total number of participants is around 1,000, as each family pays tribute by trimming a total of six trees.

"These are the people who need a little guidance and comfort," said Scalia's daughter, Cecilia Scalia-Moran, coordinator of the 11th event of its kind at the Old Bermuda Inn.

The family organizes the free holiday event by inviting family members and friends of those who have planned funerals at the funeral home.

In previous years, the event was held in one night, but since it's grown dramatically in the last several years, organizers expanded to two nights – Tuesday and Wednesday of last week.

"It gives them an opportunity to spend an hour just thinking about a relative or friend. This is a busy season and people rush through it sometimes," said Scalia, director of the John Vincent Scalia Home for Funerals, Eltingville.

"There's hundreds and hundreds of ornaments on these trees," said Scalia, "All have a name on them."

The trees, labeled alphabetically for the participants, are covered in lights and ornaments with a deceased person's name on them. Some reflect the loved one's interests or passions – like pets, a sports team or cars.

"Every one has a different story. In a lot of cases, they really reflect the person's life," said Scalia, as he scanned the trees.

The hour-long event included an invocation by Rev. Alan Travers, of Holy Child R.C. Church in Eltingville, as well as informative words from John Scalia Jr. for families that recently lost a loved one.

Some of the suggestions from Scalia Jr. included: Making a list of strengths, being with a pet, forgiving someone, calling friends and family members, writing down good things done in a day, and refusing to feel guilty.

The Holy Child Bell Choir rang in the Christmas season, and Larry Oliveri, a student at Bishop Ahern High School in Graniteville sang "Joy to the World" and "Ave Maria."

Marie Mazella, of Great Kills, checked out one of the trees before speaking up.

"I think it's wonderful," she said of the event.

Mrs. Mazella has come every year since her mother died in 2006. Her aunt passed away a year later.

"It's almost like they're never gone," said the woman, calling the tree lighting something you'll never forget. "It makes you feel good that people care."

Cousins Emily Nicholson of West Brighton, and Richard Olsen of Westerleigh, were at the event to remember numerous family members.

"It's nice to be around all these people and listen to those bells and the music," said Olsen. "It brings back memories."

Ms. Nicholson said this event provides solace, especially for those who recently lost loved ones.

Charles Teleki, an Oakwood resident who turned out to honor his deceased mother-in-law, said he'll never miss the opportunity.

"I'm very pleased the funeral home does all this for us," Teleki said before speaking of his wife's mother. "She loved me like I was her own son."

Emma Marino of Eltingville had just scheduled a wake for her son, John Marino Jr., who died last week. She put it off a day to attend the service and credited the funeral home for planning the community memorial service.

"(The other people here) are going through the same suffering that anyone else is. You're not alone here," she said.

Also in the audience were Annette Romano of Brooklyn, and Elizabeth Bauer of Eltingville.

Mrs. Bauer was mourning the loss of her husband, Frank, who died 19 years ago.

"It's peaceful," she said of the tree lighting. "It makes me feel good."

Mrs. Bauer decorateD her husband's ornament like a deck of cards, making a straight flush.

"I know right away where it is. It makes me happy," she said – happy to participate and see the other people present.

"I cry every year," admitted Mrs. Bauer. "This gives me a lot of comfort and a lot of joy that we can all get together for the people we care about. It's a tribute to them."