Pigs. My mom got into pigs. So I now have a salmon, terra cotta, wine, pig-decorated kitchen. There was a big silver pig statue by the tv that I stuck on the porch the day after she died as a pig in mourning. Sadly, no one has seen fit to steal the goddamned thing yet. And my mom's sister? Cows. She has a B&W hereford kitchen.

I'm gonna have a tchotchkes yard sale in a month. Nothing but trinkets for a dollar. My mom couldn't go into a Hobby Lobby or a Gordman's or a Ross without buying some dumb bit of knickknackery & I hate 95% of it. I like stuff that has meaning or is just weird.

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"You're cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron. And like a gas chamber, a real fun gal."

GT, I totally hear you on the stupid bowtie geese rage. It's always a blue bow, too, at least the ones i've seen. My mother totally was into those little country tchotckes. She covered every fricking horizontal surface with so much crap I nearly went insane sitting in her place because there was no restful place to look.

Polly, LOL on the "bath" thing...mom had something similar. Like...WTF? And I have to ask now...how does LeBoy's mom fold towels differently from everybody else? Mom didn't do that, as far as I know.

My brothers came to visit and one of them said, "you must not shop much"..I said "why"?? He said "you don't have many knick-knacks". (his wife is a big knick-knack shopper) I said "I'm trying to avoid Mom syndrome!" I like the clean, uncluttered look*. If a shelf is empty it is because I haven't found something special enough to put on it...I'd rather have an empty shelf than one full of junk.

*this is to be said with the caveat that my office/craft room is completely exempt from the clutterfree thing......*

Confession:

I'm supposed to fly to Memphis tomorrow, to go on vacation. On Northwestern. I'm having sort of a foreboding feeling...usually flying doesn't scare me but I'm a little uneasy about this one.....

Oh cod, LeBoy's mom has one of those cement geese that she dresses up.

Most of her decor annoys me. I just don't understand the need to have chotchkies on every wall/surface of your house. I'm far from minimalist, but I try to decorate with things that have personal meaning to me; not just a random piece of mass-produced crap I bought at Bed Bath and Beyond because it matched the couch. In the bathroom that was LeBoy's when he lived there, she had this thing hanging on the wall that's like a basket-woven thing (but not a basket, just flat, but made out of the same...hay?...that they use for baskets) that was painted country blue, had mauve wooden letters that said "BATH" and a little old-fashioned bath tub with flowers... why do you need something that says "bath" in the bathroom? In case you pass out drunk and wake up trying to figure out where you are? I was so tempted to just take the damn thing down every time I went in there.

The way she folds her towels on the towel ring drives me crazy and I "fix" it every time I go there.

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You went to school where you were taught to fear and to obey, be cheerful, fit in, or someone might think you're weird.Life can be perfect. People can be trusted. Someday, I will fall in love; a nice quiet home of my very own.Free from all the pain. Happy and having fun all the time.It never happened, did it?

it's bad. i fly into a horrible rage anytime i see those goddamn geese with bows around their necks. you know like on towels curtains n stuff. i HATE IT. i see red. an ex gf's mom used to actually have a 2ft goose statue outside her door that had seasonal outfits for every month. i so wanted to kidnap it. oh the bad things i had in mind....

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"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve

confession: women who decorate in cows ( & ducks & pigs, hearts, bows etc) irrationally Annoy me. Bad.it's like chicks that play softball- I must wear a beacon that is seen only by them "please beat me up" only it's me wanting to do the beating.

A cucumber collins does indeed sound superb; might try making them this summer...

Confession: My life is very likely to change for the better across the board in two months or so in fundamental ways: a good house move, a great job opportunity. Yet while I'm abstractly excited and grateful for these developments, I seem to be veering between unfocused rage and a kind of despair. I just can't seem to care about most things right now and I keep wanting to tell everyone to just get out of my face already.

Some of this is hormonal but damn if it doesn't feel much bigger than that, it feels existential.

Yum! Reminds me of that cucumber martini I got at Silver Cloud when we went there before that book reading, star!

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You went to school where you were taught to fear and to obey, be cheerful, fit in, or someone might think you're weird.Life can be perfect. People can be trusted. Someday, I will fall in love; a nice quiet home of my very own.Free from all the pain. Happy and having fun all the time.It never happened, did it?

"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve

Confession: I feel like I am moving away from the woman I "thought" I would be. I feel like I am moving into the woman I am meant to be. I feel good about that. Change is hard, lots of setting of boundaries, ending of unhealthy relationships, but, I feel the wealth of good friendships in my life and the love of my parents are proof of the positive outcome of it all.

Confession: I've learned the difference between needing and wanting in a relationship. Also, the work I need to do for a healthy relationship.

Confession: While in Boston, I had a Cucumber Collins and I thought about rudder's love of Vodka Collins.

I'm coming out of about 2 years of working really hard and feeling trapped in a life that isn't mine. Now that everything looks set to change for the better, I realise I have been harbouring a lot of anger and resentment, and now it's all coming out. I understand its existence, and even think it is valid, but I'm torn between being afraid of what I will do or say... and wanting to tell everyone involved to go to hell.

"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve

culture phone: ditto what Gt said.you Are stronger than you know. and competent and capable and scary smart to boot!sometimes that first step is the hardest but left foot follows right from that point on and just keep going.you are totally supported here. ((((((((CH))))))))

confession: I cannot believe that the car dealership gave me the jeep for the weekend.ME !

confession: I will NOT be afraid of the mr's reaction to it. not not not!

culture, you are more than strong enough for this. i know you are. i know you are afraid, but i know you can do it. you will be stronger and better for it. take those baby steps, little bites, don't think about the big picture, or you will keep feeling overwhelmed.

you can do this.

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"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve

"what a swell farewell party! we said goodbye to everything, including the lining in my stomach." - garvey, from the film, born bad

"That's one career all females have in common, whether we like it or not: being a woman. Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted." --margo channing, all about eve