I hate Tristan
May you die and rot in hell
You are a broad-shouldered bullshitting so-called friend
You promise, but only to break them
you say, but only to spit them
You shit, but only to eat it
Now I know why your hair is curly
So you can hide so much in it
Trying hard afro-ass
You wear a mask of an angel to be my friend
Only to find out you are my destroyer
Your core is black so as your ass-face
And your teeth are your weapons, Mighty Weapons
I hate you!
Beacause you don’t know how to hate, you only kill.

Awake for approximately 15 hours. Work from night till morning. 8 hours passed by so fast. I thought of you the whole time. How you had turned to hate me. This hurt I’ve been keeping will soon kill me. Will soon eat me. No pride left. DAGA AT IPIS NALANG ANG NATIRA. I am not sure if you are happy right now. What I am certain is you are hoping, hoping so bad that your dreams, impossible as it can be will come true. Me, out of the plan. Me, out of the picture and even out of your world. Just the three of you. There’s no one to comfort me here. No one cared. No one dare to ask or even give a tap. Fragile as I can be. I stood on top the shelf, will soon jump and break me. The “me” that risked it all but will now come the fall. VERTIGO. I tried to talk it out. I tried to elbow my way up to you, only to find out you were not there on top…

Did I really love you?
How come losing you was easy?
How come breaking up with you went so smooth?
How come tears don’t come down?
Where are they?
Have you dried my eyes all up before you go?
so that when its time for you to say goodbye they’d be ready?
Where is the pain they had all been crazy about?
Have you absorbed them all up for me to be safe and sound by this time?
I was just as how when I haven’t met you yet.
Have I really given you the best of me? Or you just had the smallest part of it?
Who’s unfair now? Was it you or me?
You, for being untruthful, or me for not feeling the pain I suppose to be feeling by now?
I believe I don’t hate you but Im not certain If I love you.
My mind just went completely blank after all,
so I guess I didn’t really love you.
I was just in love with the idea of being in love.

“Going up to the summit is optional, but coming down is mandatory,” Ramos said, quoting the first Filipino mountain climbers to scale Mount Everest. “You cannot stay at the top forever.” – Philippine Inquirer 17 July 2009