Nightmare Angel

Summary:
Edward looks through Bella's window. He has been gone for six months, two weeks, a day, and five hours. He knows every minute because it hurts so much. All he wanted to do was see her one more time. What happens when he learns what he has done to the only one he will ever love? banner that actually shows up made by the FANtastic iris!

Notes:
This will switch between Edward's thoughts and Bella's. Disclaimer: I own nothing.

“Thank you,” I whispered, and the gigantic vampire kissed the top of my hair.

Then he was gone. Alice stared at me.

“You’re my best friend, Bella, you know that? Like a sister to me. Do you know what you’re asking from me, from all of us? From Edward?”

“I know it isn’t fair to you. Why do you think I lived this long? I didn’t want to hurt anyone. But I can’t do it, Alice. I can’t live without him, and now I can’t kill myself without help.”

“You don’t have to live without me, Bella! I swear I love you. I swear it!” Edward interjected. I closed weary eyes.

“I’m leaving, Bella. I can’t do this,” Alice muttered.

“Good-bye.”

“Bye…”

And she too disappeared.

Carlisle was silent. What was there for him to say? I could see quite clearly that he could not kill. Could not break his four-hundred-year streak of self-denial.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “To both of you. I cannot live with blood on my hands.”

“I know.”

Edward and I were alone. He stared at me, shocked, almost awed. “Bella, do you know how beautiful you are?” he asked.

I just laughed. “Nice try.”

“I swear I’m not playing games or tricking you. I love you. Is there nothing I can do to prove that?”

“You know what. Go ahead.”

He bowed his glorious head, closing perfect eyes. “Very well. I will damn myself to hell still more thoroughly. I will place the blood of an angel on my hands. I will slay my only chance at happiness and wander the world forever alone. Because I love you. I will prove it.”

Maybe he isn’t lying… ridiculous. Still, this is the only way I can end my life. And I can’t go on. I don’t have Charlie to live for anymore- I can never see him again. I might as well not live at all.

“May I ask one favor, first?”

I acquiesced.

“Before I kill you, may I have a kiss?”

It would hurt… but it was the one thing he asked of me. And he had agreed to end my suffering. So I nodded, and he stepped closer to me, pressing my body to his, lifting me a few inches off the ground and inclining his face downward to meet my upturned lips.

I did not pass out or pant for breath as I had, human. Yet his lying lips planted doubt in my mind. He is so good at this. Such an excellent manipulator…

And these thoughts were knocked from my head by his lips on mine, pressing firmer.

“Edward, I love you…” I whispered against his mouth.

“I love you,” he promised, and I almost believed.

He pulled away and raised a hand, bringing his strong fist crashing on my arm. I felt the flesh tear from my granite body.

He was ripping my physical form into pieces, just as he’d torn my soul.

I watched him sob as he worked, the dry tears falling metaphorically to pool on the ground I imagined. And I realized he had convinced me again. I might just give him another chance, because I couldn’t resist him.