I said wait Come over here and pile some food on this plate I ain’t going to gym bitch, I ain’t lifting no weights Look at me I’m sickening, yeah yeah yeah I’m sickening I may be fat bitch, but you’re ugly and I can lose weight -Weight by Latrice Royale I’ve spent too many minutes in my life thinking…

I’m eight years old and we are in Benue. My family and I had been travelling for hours and had just gotten into Ucha. We children are gathered round the biggest bowl of pounded yam I have ever seen. On the white mound of the pounded yam, there is a small splash of brown water from hastily washed hands. But…

My grandmother Aya used to pull her children and grandchildren to her side every Christmas holiday. We came from Lagos, Jos and Zaria and would stay at Aya’s compound in Zaki Biam, my hometown. Zaki Biam is a tiny place almost dissected cleanly into two by a major road. It rose to the national conscience in 2001 after soldiers killed…

Modest Mouse, is probably best known for their Grammy nominated single ‘Float On’ from the album “Good News for People who Love Bad News”. It has that fantastic line “A fake Jamaican took every last dime with that scam.” From the same album, the song Ocean Breathes Salty talks about death but with upbeat-ish music. The first line goes: “Your…

When Princess Diana died, I was in Makurdi. Sitting on the cold tiles on the floor of my parents bathroom, crying. Yes, I let drama wash over me sometimes. When Aaliyah died, I was at university and seriously worried about my friend Nkem. Nkem absolutely adored Aaliyah. She dressed like her (wore half top in Gwagwalada), mimed and performed all her…

Right at the end of 2015, I walked out of a one month old job with no new job in sight. I needed to keep myself busy. A friend and I had talked about making a podcast, had gone as far as buying a microphone (thanks Festus!), but still hadn’t done anything with it. I decided to do one by…

It was the last day of my life in Lagos. I make it sound like I am writing this from beyond the grave but I just mean that I moved. What else do you do when you feel a city doesn’t want you anymore? The next morning I was going to get on a 6.25am flight to London. But that…

Feminism is a “dirty” word. And as with any dirty word, people would rather not be labelled with it. They twist themselves into knots to avoid the tag even if they believe in its basic tenets. Sometimes they call themselves humanist, which is another kettle of fish. Even the Oxford dictionary links the definition of rabid (marked by excessive enthusiasm for…