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National Trust launches ‘heritage evictions’

The National Trust is to open its evictions of its tenants to the public.

‘The general public will be able to visit what we are calling heritage evictions of our tenants.’ said a spokeswoman. ‘People will be able to see traditionally distressed families evicted from our many picturesque stone cottages and working farms set in beautiful rural surroundings, onto green fields, orchards and rolling downs – hopefully in the dead of winter.’

The Trust is also promising that the evictions will preserve traditional ways of ejecting tenants from properties.

‘Our bailiffs will dress in historically accurate costume and we hope to seize the small children of tenants who have rent arrears. So we shall be preserving the very best of British eviction,’ the spokeswoman added.

The Trust will open an heritage eviction trail with an enactment of Sir Winston Churchill being evicted from Chartwell.