Mutterings of a Mad Woman

Gather round kiddies. Ol'Ghoul is going to tell you a tale that is like a teaching fairytale for adults: interesting characters, surprises, that moment where our protagonist gets into a bad situation because they didn't do what they should have...all the good stuff. The moral of my tale? Get dressed by 11 am even on your day off.

Once upon a time, there was a woman who'd had a whirlwind week (read: month). Her house was ramshackled. Her front lawn neglected. And she was expecting a visitor later in the day, a visitor who had never seen her home before and might be bringing a camera. The visitor - we'll call her Amy - was set to arrive around 5 pm.

The woman began cleaning her house early that morning. She had errands to run also, and thought about getting dressed. It was getting close to noon, after all. She decided to wait. She'd only be getting dirtier as the house got cleaner, and there was much left to do. And she wanted to make a good impression, of course.

It's important to make a good impression, isn't it?

Dusting, sweeping, sorting, washing, stopping only to brush her teeth (no time for the hair).

Doorbell rings.

The woman pauses her work, looks toward the sound, then looks down at her Popeye-themed pajama bottoms and oversized dress shirt she's wearing (she can't see the dirt, but she can feel it).

It's only 11 am. No packages expected. No visitors until later. Just leave it.

Doorbell rings again.

She throws on her red hoodie as she moves to the front door.

A man in a black helmet (no not Vader) and sun glasses is at her door, holding a large envelope.

A bike courier?

They share salutations and he asks if she is Ghoul Friday, which catches her off guard a little, but postal carriers do sometimes address her by that name.

She tells the man yes, and he hands her the large envelope, decorated with spooks and ghouls, her name in the branches, her address on the tombstone (blurred in the image so I could show it to you).

Tonight is Creature Feature, the opening solo show of Toronto artist Andie Wolf. With subjects ranging from monsters to mammals, Owl Song (as she's known online) explores nature and the unnatural in equal parts. Always fun, and often beautiful, her work is a refreshing take on imagery we thought we knew.

Join Andie Wolf at Playful Grounds (in Little Italy) tonight at 8 pm for the opening. If you can't make it tonight, the show will run into November, and a second installment will continue until year end. Playful Grounds, 605 College St. (between Bathurst & Ossington) Toronto, Ontario 416-645-0484

I had a grand theme planned for this year. Several large sculpting projects. One huge build.

When September 1st hit, I realized I wasn't going to have the time or the budget to execute the plan this year (but maybe next year). As the start of September crept closer to mid-September, I started to panic. I couldn't decide on what to do. Finally I asked myself "if you could incorporate any theme into your Halloween party decor, just for your own enjoyment (as opposed to what I think would look really cool), what would it be?"

Well, THAT'S easy. Twin Peaks.

Huh.

And just like that, this year's theme was decided.

I'm a big Twin Peaks fan. I would drop everything and run away with Agent Dale Cooper in a heartbeat. I've been to the real Twin Peaks (twice), sat in the real Double R Diner, and had coffee black as midnight on a moonless night with a plate of cherry pie.

I've refined the theme a bit, of course. I could do a general Twin Peaks party, but I wanted to stay true to the Halloween element. I'm designing the decor around the Black Lodge/White Lodge concept (for those who never watched the show, basically it's believed there are good and bad realms the spirit must to pass through, and where evil/goodness presides).

Yesterday (our Thanksgiving Monday) while Canadians everywhere were chowing down on Turkey dinners, I was painting.

I was able to get a number of figures completed (and a few close to completion). As you may know, I'm having my Lucky 13 sale on Etsyup until October 13th, at which point I will put the shop in vacation mode until after my last show of the season.

Every year I try to come up with a new "thing" for shows, especially for the Bazaar of the Bizarre (Oct 21st in Toronto) where people tend to like my stuff vs my art if that makes any sense at all. One of the new items for this year is my Halloween in a Jar dioramas. I'd done a handful of prototypes for FanExpo and all sold.

This time around, I've picked up some fairly large jars and some very tiny jars. The pumpkins seen here are for the tiny jars. To put it into perspective, note the size of the penny beside the pumpkins. Teeny weenie!

When they invented Halloween products for dogs, they had people like me in mind. They saw me a mile away.

My budget for this year's Halloween decor is tight. I mean stranglehold-tight. And with the exception of a couple purchases for this year's theme, I put myself on a Halloween diet: no spending besides what is on the list.

Here in Canada, we don't get as many Halloween-themed foods as our friends south of the border. It's a novelty I lament missing out on, though most of the products are foods I wouldn't normally buy (like sugary cereals or waffles). It would just be nice to see them in the grocery aisle.

The other day, Yetch came home with Pillsbury Cookies that had ghosts on them.

Generally speaking, on the rare occasion when cookies are in the house, they are usually homemade. I don't enjoy baking (love cooking, hate baking), but if I'm going to indulge, I want it to taste really good.

I am familiar with Pillsbury products. We had them growing up, and when I was in the my early 20s, it was the closest thing to baking that I attempted.

I knew where to set the bar flavour-wise.

Regardless, there is something magical about ready-stamped cookies with Halloween images!

I unwrapped the pucks of dough and looked at the back of the box for cooking instructions. Printed across the package are suggestions of ways to "fancy up" your cookies. One suggested rolling them in sprinkles. Well, I have sprinkles, I thought, and if I add them, it's almost like I made them myself, right?

"At the end of September, the outbreak began. By October 4th, the entire city was overrun. Now it’s up to all of us to head to the safe zone on October 25th to survive.

On October 25th, 2012, we are calling on you to help us break the Guinness World Record for CPR training at The Undeading At Wonderland – Presented by the Heart and Stroke Foundation.

For $14.99 – 60% off of regular admission, not only will you be a part of this historic and exclusive event, but you will also have full access to the park and Halloween Haunt and learn how to save lives with CPR.