I’m sure most of you are familiar with the strip club review site TUSCL. If not, it’s basically a site where members post reviews of national and international strip clubs. TUSCL requires people to register with the site before posting a review. Reviews are *supposed* to be screened by an admin before getting approved. I posted some reviews on TUSCL in order to get VIP access to the reviews, but recently decided to let my membership lapse. It’s become apparent to most members that the quality of the site and its reviews has plummeted. The number of frivolous reviews is ridiculous and I’m starting to suspect that strip clubs are having employees post fake reviews. Consider these two examples:

About a month ago, a new user (who had just registered) posted this review for Visions Men’s Club (all misspellings and grammatical errors were left in place to emphasize how stupid this guy is/was):

Here quality and quantity is present. Also unlike some clubs if they are not customers of the girls out on there ass. The clubs awsome, Girls are Beutiful, and you would think they walked out of penthouse. If you go anywhere else your wasting your money, Drinks are priced the same as if you went to the bar down the street!! Management is really running this establishment top notch with customers #1 , and instead of hiding in office all night there at door or walking around to make sure you have a smile on your face.

To give TUSCL credit where it’s due, I flagged this as a “frill review” and an administrator removed the post that night. Thank God strip club employees are so dumb – they make themselves obvious. For the record, regular neighborhood bars don’t sell beers for $4 and single-shot mixed drinks for $8+.

This next review for the Penthouse Club is a little less brazen, but I still suspect it’s a club employee (also consider that some clubs hire ad agencies for online marketing and posting overhyped reviews is a marketing tactic):

I’ve been going to the Penthouse in New Orleans for quite some time now and must say: for anyone passing through, the Penthouse on Iberville is a must-see. Three levels, gorgeous girls, beautiful club. Well lit. Not “seedy” as compared to other NOLA clubs. This place is amazing to say the least. Seemed to be at least 100 girls and each one making money. Also worth a mention, as someone who’s coming from the place that claims to have “invented the lap dance” (Tampa), this club allows the patrons and girls to have a lot more fun than it’s Tampa counterpart. While Tampa is obeying the “two finger rule” (dancers wear thongs that are two fingers wide all the way around) and forcing their girls to wear “titty tape” (flesh colored medical grade tape that appears to be more of a torture device than having any relevant or logical explanation behind it), Penthouse NOLA allows their girls to get creative with ther outfits, in turn allowing their personalities to truly shine through. And what a mix of personalities you will find here. So much to choose from. After having visited a few of the others off Bourbon St., (namely Rick’s Cabaret, Deja Vu, and Hustler Club along with a few others) it is clear Penthouse NOLA is a cut above the rest. FUNFACT: according to the waitresses it’s not uncommon for famous faces to wind up in the PH club.

First, concerning the “each one making money” line – why would customers care? How is that relevant to the customer experience? That sounds more like self-promotion for the club.

Second, the comments about Tampa strip clubs is just flat wrong. There are several high-profile, fully nude strip clubs in Tampa – including Mons Venus and 2001 Odyssey. And girls at topless clubs in Tampa are NOT required to wear pasties, latex, etc. What the hell is the “two finger” rule?

Third, as for girls “getting creative with their outfits” – again, why would the customers care? The point is to see the girls without their clothing. I realize that some customers have fetishes for cheerleaders, nurses, school girls, etc. – and if that’s the case you won’t like Penthouse. I’ve never seen the girls at Penthouse in costume (unless it’s Halloween). They’re all dressed in traditional dancerwear.

Finally, if any “famous faces” wind up in Penthouse, they’ll be in a private room separate from everyone else and you won’t see them. What a stupid comment.

Considering TUSCL requires people to pay to see member reviews (unless they’re actively posting reviews – which gives you free VIP access), I think the quality is outrageous. The reviews have become painfully vague, irrelevant, and ultimately worthless – which is why I stopped posting there and started this blog. Are there still quality reviews at TUSCL? Absolutely. I don’t want to get into a TUSCL bashing war. But when 100% of your content is user submitted, the content should be free. Period.

Guys, I apologize I’ve been absent for so long. Work’s got me stressed right now, but I will have a follow-up review for Lipstixx and for Stiletto’s soon. I promise.

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4 Responses to My Gripe with TUSCL

Odyssey 2001 and Mons Venus are the only two fully nude strip clubs in Tampa because they are BYOB/the bar is in a separate room. All other topless clubs in Tampa do require pasties and most use flesh colored medical tape. A two finger rule actually does exist and most clubs adhere to it, although it’s gotten more lax since the police stopped raiding the Tampa clubs. Though I do agree the review is by an employee solely based off the “all the girls are making money” line.

Reviews are always at your own risk. Just like anything else on the internet. You can not believe everthing. One stellar review amongst the rest being horrible should stand out. The really good clubs will have 100 reviews, so no questions there. Also a correction. Pink Pony, Scarletts and Deja Vu are full nude in Tampa.

My blog isn’t the word of God. If you dig back through some of my posts, you’ll see instances of me saying a club is terrible and then singing its praises just a few months later. You can’t judge a club from one (or even two or three) experiences. You may go on a night where the top girls decided to stay home, or at a time when the club is in between managers. Those bad nights may be an anomaly. I write these reviews based on what I see. I’ve been to Visions dozens of times, so I think my reviews are pretty good there, but I rarely go to places like Deja Vu and Rick’s Sporting Saloon. If I go on an off night, my review will reflect that. Take everything with a grain of salt…