Kids and Smoking: What's the Worst Thing to Say?

Talking to your kids about smoking can be extremely difficult. But believe it or not, research suggests that kids actually do value what their parents tell them about smoking and other addictive substances. So before you have the big smoking talk with your kids, take our quiz to make sure you know how NOT to answer some of their questions.

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Question 1 of 20

Why is what you say about smoking different from what I read on the Internet?

You should listen to what I say, not what you read somewhere else.

Don't insult your children's intelligence by telling them to listen to what you have to say if they can easily find opposing facts or opinions. Kids are extremely savvy these days about finding information on smoking (and everything else) from sources like the Internet. So be up front about the facts, and do your own research first.

You're right, I wasn't being 100 percent truthful.

Not everyone agrees on everything when it comes to smoking.

Question 2 of 20

Is smoking really that bad for you?

Yes. As soon as you start smoking, it will get harder to breathe and play sports.

Yes. The health effects of smoking will eventually catch up to you, someday.

You should try to give your children an idea about the long-term health effects of smoking, but try to focus more on short term effects. Kids are great at saying to themselves "that's 30 years away; I don't have to worry about that now."

Yes. It will even start to stain your teeth and give you bad breath.

Question 3 of 20

You smoke. Why shouldn't I?

Because becoming a smoker is something I regret.

Do as I say, not as I do.

Don't try to put up a front with your kids. Using the "do as I say, not as I do" approach won't get through to them. Instead, be honest about the fact that smoking is bad for you, and you know that it's something you should try to quit.

Because smoking is bad for you and me, and I could end up sick from it, too.

Question 4 of 20

Can I smoke these new "e-cigarettes" instead?

E-cigarettes are so new, the government has not even regulated them yet so it's better to stay away.

E-cigarettes haven't been extensively tested, so they're not safe enough for you to try.

E-cigarettes don't have any tobacco in them, so they are safer than regular cigarettes.

Manufacturers of e-cigarettes frequently claim that, because their products don't have any tobacco, they are much safer than regular cigarettes. But don't pass this along to your children. E-cigarettes have not been widely tested by government regulators or independent scientists, so there's no telling how safe or unsafe they may be.

Question 5 of 20

Why is there so much smoking on TV?

You might think smoking on TV makes characters look cool, but they don't explain what happens when you smoke in real life.

Some people smoke in real life, so some people smoke on TV; it's only natural.

It's important to make clear to your children that TV doesn't reflect reality. While people on TV might look cool when they smoke, the shows almost never portray the long-term health effects or other risks of smoking. Make those facts clear to children so that they don't think the laid-back smokers on television represent the reality of smoking.

Sometimes people smoke on TV because of product placement from the tobacco companies.

Question 6 of 20

Can I smoke as long as I don't do it in the house?

You can't smoke at all, at least until you're 18.

Absolutely not.

I don't like it, but I can't stop you from smoking when I'm not there.

It's important to have a clear no smoking policy in the house. Statistics show that children are less likely to smoke if they grow up in households with these rules. But just because you can't control what your child does at school or with friends, you need to make it clear that you have a zero tolerance policy for smoking.

Question 7 of 20

How can I quit smoking if I've already started?

We can talk to your pediatrician about options to quit smoking.

Quitting is up to you. You got yourself into this mess.

Never tell your children that quitting is up to them, and also don't give them an ultimatum like "quit or you're grounded." It's important to be supportive and thank them for being honest with you. Quitting is hard enough for an adult. Without your support, your kid might not be able to get through the pain and discomfort of nicotine withdrawals.

First we need to make a list of your reasons for quitting to help motivate you.

Question 8 of 20

What if I slip up and have one cigarette after I decide to quit?

If that happens, it means you're grounded for a week.

Don't use punishment to try to motivate your kid to quit smoking. The best thing to do is simply encourage them to immediately get back to quitting if they slip up. That's what professionals tell adults, so kids should try to do the same thing.

If that happens, go back to quitting immediately. Don't let one slip-up ruin all of your hard work.

If you slip up, you'll have to go through all of the withdrawals and cravings all over again.

Question 9 of 20

My friends say it's okay to smoke so why can't I?

Because we agreed that you aren't allowed to make that decision until you're old enough.

Because we've talked about the dangers of smoking, and you know it's not a good idea.

Because I said so.

Trying to order your kids around without explanations can often backfire, so don't go for the "I told you so" approach. Explain the reasons you've discussed in the past for not smoking, and use those to persuade your kids. Making a stand without explanation is more likely to encourage your kid to use their friends' cigarette offers as a chance to rebel.

Question 10 of 20

Won't I be okay as long as I quit smoking before I get older?

No. Any amount of smoking is bad for your health.

No. Smoking is extremely addictive, and there's no guarantee you'll be able to quit.

Yes. It's okay to experiment with smoking a little while you're young.

Being a kid might be the time for experimenting, but it's not a good idea to turn a blind eye and allow kids to experiment with smoking. The nicotine in cigarettes is extremely addictive, so it's better to make it clear that the best way to be a non-smoker later in life is never to start.

Question 11 of 20

What should I say if a friend offers me a cigarette?

Tell them that you think smoking is wrong and bad for your health.

It isn't always the easiest thing to turn down a cigarette, especially if peer pressure is at work. So don't tell your kids that they have to take a moral stand. It might be easier for them to make up an excuse, even if it's a little fib, to avoid being pressured further.

Tell them no thanks. That you don't want to smell like smoke.

Tell them no. You don't want to get addicted because you're saving your money up for a car.

Question 12 of 20

Should I stop being someone’s friend if they start smoking?

Absolutely stop being their friend.

Try to lead your child to make good decisions by asking questions like, "Is a person who wants you to smoke the best person to be friends with?" Ordering them not to be friends with someone is more likely to drive them to do the opposite, especially for teenagers.

No. You should continue to be their friend.

Maybe you should think about whether someone who pressures you into smoking is the best person to be friends with.

Question 13 of 20

I heard chewing tobacco isn't as bad as cigarettes. Can I do that?

Yes. If you feel strongly about it, chewing is at least safer than smoking.

The popularity of chewing tobacco as a safer alternative to cigarettes is based on myth. So don't allow your child to chew tobacco if you wouldn't allow them to smoke it. Explain instead that tobacco is just as dangerous if it's chewed as it is when it's smoked.

No. Chewing tobacco has just as many health consequences as smoking.

No. Chewing tobacco is still addictive.

Question 14 of 20

Are menthol cigarettes less addictive?

Yes. Menthol cigarettes are less addictive than normal cigarettes.

It's a myth that menthol cigarettes are less (or more) addictive, so don't spread this rumor on to your kids. When it comes to hard data, there is no proof that menthol cigarettes are either more or less addictive than regular cigarettes. Chemically, the two are almost the same product.

Honestly, there is very little difference between menthol and regular cigarettes.

No. Menthol cigarettes are extremely addictive, just like regular cigarettes.

Question 15 of 20

Are you going to quit smoking?

Quitting smoking is a struggle, but I will quit if you promise not to start.

I have tried to quit smoking before, but I'll try again if we can do it together.

I don't need to quit smoking.

For smokers, kids asking about smoking can be the time when they realize it's time to give up the habit. Don't refuse to quit if your children ask you to. Even if you don't want to quit, try not to have a double standard that your children will see through. Limit your smoking to outside the house, or when your children are not present.

Question 16 of 20

How addictive is nicotine really?

Nicotine is more addictive than heroine.

Nicotine is one of the most addictive substances in the world.

Nicotine is addictive, but it's always possible to quit.

When you're talking to your kids about smoking, make sure you make it very clear just how addictive nicotine can be. Don't focus too much on how it's possible to quit unless your child has already admitted to smoking. Talking about quitting might encourage them to think they can start and easily quit later.

Question 17 of 20

Can't I smoke every once in awhile without becoming an addict?

Yes, 10 percent of people don't become addicted, so you do have a chance.

Scientifically, it is true that about one in 10 smokers are not addicted to nicotine physically, but they do have a mental predilection. But don't focus on this when talking to your kids. Instead, talk about how those odds are actually not very good, and that nicotine is extremely addictive.

It's true that not every smoker is addicted to nicotine, but it's not worth the risk.

Smoking once in awhile can be a slippery slope. Once you start, it can be very hard to stop, even if you're not addicted.

Question 18 of 20

If it's so hard to quit smoking, why bother trying?

Quitting smoking is always a good idea, because your health will improve once you stop.

Quitting smoking is hard, but you can do it with your family's support.

Because you have to follow the rules of my house, and I'm telling you to quit.

Setting rules is important, but once you find out that your kid is smoking, and trying to quit, it's better to try to focus on how you can help them and support them, and not on what you can order them to do. Don't say they have to quit because it's the rule, explain why they should quit, and promise to be by their side every step of the way.

Question 19 of 20

If smoking is so bad, does that mean smokers are bad people?

No. People who smoke just made a bad decision.

No. Smoking is very addictive, and used to be very popular, so a lot of people who might not want to smoke still do.

Yes. You shouldn't associate with people who smoke.

You want to be honest with your children about smoking, so you can answer complex questions with complex answers. Explain that smoking is a choice, and a tough habit to break, but don't tell them that everyone who smokes is bad.

Question 20 of 20

If smoking is bad, why did you used to let me buy candy cigarettes?

Candy cigarettes used to be a lot more popular, but people have realized that they can make kids think smoking is okay.

It clearly wasn't a good idea for us to play with those candy cigarettes when you were younger.

Candy cigarettes aren't that bad. They were just for fun. Cigarettes are much worse.

Make it clear to kids that candy cigarettes, and make believing about cigarettes in general, probably isn't a good idea. It's not smart to try to draw a line between the two, since studies have shown that playing with candy cigarettes makes people more likely to be smokers.