7:13 a.m. Climb back into bed. Am still tired. Will stay for just 15 more minutes.

7:40 a.m. Damn it!

7:41 – 8:05 a.m. – Take super fast shower, do hair and makeup. Marvel at the power of a good under-eye concealer and mascara.

8:06-8:17 – Get dressed. Thank goodness it’s Friday and I can wear jeans.

8:22 a.m. – Get out the door.

8:23 – 8: 48 a.m. Drive. Notice that by the state of my car, it is clear that I have a cold. Make a note to gather up all the used tissues when I get to work and throw them away. Am gross.

8:49 a.m. – Get behind slow driver in the left lane who won’t speed up enough to let me pass the guy on the right and I really need to get over. I speed up just a little so I can squeeze in between them. And he slams on his breaks. Jackass. I slam on my breaks to avoid hitting his Audi and move into the right lane. I look over at him to give him an annoyed glare and notice his gigantic mullet. Forget that I’m annoyed because I am shocked at the size of it. And think that I’ve never seen a mullet in an Audi before.

11:02 am: Sympathize with the thirst. Even if I just have like one beer, I wake up with cotton mouth in the middle of the damn night.
11:03 am: Marvel at the thought of a mullet in an Audi. Wish that you could have taken a picture to show us.
11:04 am: Continue to want dog. Even if they puke and are annoying.
11:05 am: Wish I had a donut. Or two. Or, okay, seven.

“I look over at him to give him an annoyed glare and notice his gigantic mullet. Forget that I’m annoyed because I am shocked at the size of it. And think that I’ve never seen a mullet in an Audi before.”