Posted
by
CowboyNeal
on Friday March 17, 2006 @12:16AM
from the justice-served dept.

Gosalia wrote to let us know about an article which opens with: "In a legal win for Google, a federal judge dismissed a lawsuit filed by a writer who claimed the search giant infringed on his copyright by archiving a Usenet posting of his and providing excerpts from his Web site in search results." Thankfully, we can all still read Usenet articles on Google as well as other archive services.

I have always wondered what those guys suing for anything _really_ think ? For example, does this guy honestly thought Google was violating his copyright ? Or did he sue just to give a try and maybe obtain easy money via financial compensation ?

I own this classic, and seminal, guide and happened to notice that you only gave the concise form of the `genius plan' (as the author frequently calls it). The plan branches into two detailed versions based on frequency of occurence. I figured the Slashdot crowd (of all crowds) could benefit from the detail.

The uncommon form, but `the one most guys, idiots, anticipate' (69) is:

Sue Google.

Win

Profit!

Get laid!

This is the uncommon form because rarely do you ever win the lawsuit. If you should happen to win, however, we can explicitly extract `Profit!' from `???' in the concise form to get the uncommon form just above. In this case 4) is a corollary to 3); everyone knows that `when you've got the riches you can lay the bitches' (138). But we really do not expect to win the lawsuit, so the above information is included mainly for completeness.

The common form, the `one you paid $43.95 to see' (inside flap), is:

Sue Google.

Lose.

Get Laid!

The main gem of this classic work is the knowledge that `hotties love losers' (207).

So, to sum up, hotties love money and hotties love losers. By suing Google you are destined to either lose or get rich. In either case, you will get laid!

The following words were posted to various groups on Usenet by RayGordon (aka Gordon Roy Parker) in the hours following the terroristattacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon:

"There was no significant loss of life in those towers. Nota one."- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)

"This attack happened in my HOMETOWN, a hometown I do notlive in or work in because of illegal behavior. I hope thosewho swiped my ability to live there enjoy the message they gotfrom GOD today.........."
- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)

"It is so PATHETIC how we are making angels out of some of theworst corporate criminals in America just because they suffereda little bombing."
- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)

"Do not mourn the trader trash."
- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)

"All I have said is that most of the victims who worked in that buildingwere not moral creatures. In fact, many of the very powerful types whodied in that blast used to say 'let God deal with them.' I did. Godhas."
- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)

"It's not my fault that Bin Laden unwittingly took out a large segmentof American TRASH, and while I'd never do something like that, I haveto say those victims were anything but angels. They were greedy,capitalistic employment discriminators with no regard for thecivil rights of anyone but themselves. Looks like GOD wanted me aroundand not them. Who am I to question the lord?"
- Gordon Roy Parker (aka Ray Gordon)