The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion/Stop right there, criminal scum!

The meme became so popular, Bethesda Softworks decided to make a sequel based on it.

Stop right there, criminal scum! is a meme derived from the totally awesome game, Oblivicocks. In the game when you are caught committing a crime the Imperial Guard will Buttsex you until you pay the fine of over 9,000 dollars. Before long 4chan picked up on this and started spamming it across the internets until its ass bled. Because of this very meme, Oblivion became win.

Contents

My name is Imperial Guard, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are low endurance, low intelligence troublemakers who spend every second of their day looking for laws to break. You are everything bad in Tamriel. Honestly, have any of you ever bought something? I mean, I guess it's fun stealing shopkeepers' property because of your low score in mercantile, but you all take it to a whole new level. This is even worse than pickpocketing wandering traders when no guards are around.

Don't be a criminal. Just hit anyone within eyesight. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the running team, and starter on my shouting team. What sports do you play, other than "commit senseless acts of violence and theft against those who cannot defend themselves"? I also have full Imperial Armor, and have arrested the hero many times (She just paid the fine; Shit was SO gold). You are all criminals who should have just payed the fine. Thanks for listening.