This has been building up since this album’s release day. Like I literally have stuff piled in my computer’s lil memory bank dating mid-September just for this post. This is a blog post about Rainbow and how it completely changed and saved my life, and how I live my life everyday with the lessons and empowerment I’ve taken from this woman. I think I’m going to divide it up by Rainbow-album-song-increments, but also just showing you guys the Rainbow pre-order bundle I got along with other Rainbow merch and concert Rainbow merch too. So yeah lots of Rainbow shit. I’m both incredibly proud and also fully prepared to walk you through my world of Rainbow that I’ve created from the one and only, my favorite album of the year, and of all time. The most moving, the most inspirational, the most empowering, and the strongest fucking woman I know of.

Don’t let the bastards get you down, don’t let the assholes wear you out. Don’t let the mean girls take the crown, don’t let the scumbags screw you round, don’t let the bastards get you down. – (track 1, Bastards)

I’m not going to tell you my life story with Rainbow because that is an ancient tale, 3 months of being in love, but this album saved me when I was getting out of a really rough relationship. It saved me from myself, from people affecting me, and it taught me that fear is a choice and so is being strong. So I fight everyday, and I’ll fight forever.

Shake that ass, don’t care if they talk about it. Just let ’em talk about it! Do your thing, don’t care if we make them jealous. Do whatever makes you happy and screw everything else if you ask me! Haters, just forget about them. – (track 2, Let ‘Em Talk)

The first things I got were my pre-order bundle, I ordered it from Kesha’s site a couple weeks before the release date. I got the 3-item bundle with the shirt, poster and CD. I got the CD on August 16th, and by August 26th I finally received the shirt and poster (they came separately but I don’t remember which came first) and then I had the whole crew. But by the time I got it all I had also ordered the Japanese version of the Rainbow CD which isn’t much different, it just comes in a jewel case and has one bonus track (Emotional) because I had already realized I was OBSESSED with the album and I was so fucking excited to kickstart this collection. I’ll show you that later I guess. Let me show you the pre-order bundle.

The shirt is so simplistic but comforting and ADORABLE and this is like my favorite poster ever. So not too bad for $54 or something including shipping. I’m completely in love, but this is not even close to the best parts/the most amazing surprises.

I know that I’m perfect, even though I’m fucked up; hymn for the hymnless, don’t need no forgiveness, ’cause if there’s a heaven, don’t care if we get in. (track 4, Hymn) If we die before we wake, who we are is no mistake, this is just the way we’re made! If you know what I mean? You on the team. This is a hymn for the hymnless, kids with no religion, yeah we keep on sinning, yeah we keep on singing.

The album was released into the infinite cosmic universe, and it played over and over in my head. It was always on repeat, making me cry or dance or laugh, I JAMMED to this shit! I was so so so excited about it! And like I felt like the Kesha Candle was the one that got away… until a little bit later they started SELLING IT SEPARATELY and then it definitely became my goal to get it! When I was FINALLY able to get this candle I was finally able to get the bolo tie too! This seriously makes me wanna cry so hard I’m so incredibly in love.

You brought the flames and you put me through hell, I had to learn how to fight for myself. And we both know all the truth I could tell, I’ll just say this is I wish you farewell.(track 5, Praying) I hope you find your peace, falling on your knees, praying.

Learn To Let Go was the song that changed everything. It saved me from myself, it saved me from holding on to toxicity, it taught me how to be as strong as I motherfucking am right now. I will forever love that song and it will forever mark a new time in my life, a new time of confidence, life, experience, and depth.

I know I’m always like telling everybody “you don’t gotta be the victim, life ain’t always fair but hell is living is resentment; choose redemption; your happy ending’s up to you.” I think it’s time I practice what I preach, exorcise the demons inside me. Learn to let it go! Learn to let go, learn to let go. (track 6, Learn To Let Go)The past can’t haunt me if I don’t let it, live and learn and never forget it. Learn to let it go!

And now we move on to me + the concert. The amazing concert. I was blown away. I’m not going to type too much about the concert itself because I’d be typing for days, but it was incredible. I’m sprinkling concert videos throughout this post but I also wanna show you guys what I wore to the concert, and some little selfies and pics and stuff from it.

“Get Sleazy” Kesha shirt to get pumped

Ticket!

Ready for the concert

At the concert

The drunk ppl next to me had confetti

Outfit

I’m gonna search for your love, right through hell and heaven. Millions of years yet to come, and in all dimensions. I know that you’ll always be my happy ending. I know forever don’t exist, after this life I’ll find you in the next. So when I say forever it’s the goddamn truth, I’ll keep finding, finding you.(track 7, Finding You)

The shirt I wore to the concert says “Everything you go through grows you” plus that jacket I had on TOTALLY was Kesha as fuck when paired with the Kymajesty lip metallic. I’m so passionately in love with that outfit choice but more in love with the actual concert. It was amazing. She has beautiful powerful vibes that seemed to take ahold of the room. She is such a strong woman and I am so in love with her messages, her power, her ability to make the entire room shake their fucking asses, and the fact that above all she wants to be more than human. Honestly, after the concert, that’s when my Spaceship obsession started. I had spaceships everywhere, even carved one into a pumpkin with my boyfriend and his family, because the song Spaceship (last track) is real and special to me and I can’t wait to tell you about that one. I love to listen to this album top to bottom, I know this album word for word beginning to end, I don’t need lyric sheets for all the lyrics I’ve been writing in this post. They’re in my fucking heart. And I’m listening to the album of course.

Yeah maybe my head’s fucked up, but I’m falling right back in love with being alive, dreaming in life. This kitty kat lost her mind, been looking for stars and signs that I’ll be alright, look to the skies…You’ll find a Rainbow, Rainbow baby trust me I know, Life is Scary but just put those colors on girl, come and paint the world with me tonight. You gotta learn to let go, put the past behind you trust me I know, the ghosts will try to find you but just put those colors on girl, come and play along with me tonight. (track 8, album title track Rainbow also the first song she wrote for the album, back in rehab around Nov 2014-Jan 2015) I can’t lose hope, what’s left of my heart is still made of gold!! And maybe I’m still fucked up, but aren’t we all my love? Darling, our scars, make us who we are; when the winds are howling strong, and you think you can’t go on hold tight sweetheart… you’ll find a rainbow.

See, when I listen to Rainbow, I try to listen to understand it, and not to judge it. I listen to interpret and feel it and not try to take it apart and poke holes. Kesha has these subtleties about her and she’s incredibly clever and her IQ is scary high and she’s just a powerful woman that makes me realize what life really is… And that not everyone belongs here, and that’s okay. Because we are all LOVED, even if it’s just by fucking Kesha!! You guys have the strength and the power and the love, you can’t give up! I love you all too! Come and paint the world with me tonight 🙂

I ain’t never hurt nobody, never buried a body, never killed no one no no but I ain’t afraid to get a little crazy baby when I’m in love! You say you’ve had your fun but that you’re done and I’m the one, just know, if you fuck around, boy I’ll hunt you down. (track 9, Hunt You Down)

And now we get on to the best part. The concert merch. I got there moderately early (around doors) and got in line for the merch and eagerly looked at my options and tried to think quickly and skillfully; first, I decided to get one shirt instead of two shirts, so that I could get some sort of accessory. I got the hat and the spaceship pin, with the album cover shirt, and I love it ALL. I spent $80 for all three, and created this shoot from it. Low key freaking out that I get to rep more Rainbow.

The shirt has the album cover stuff but on a black background, and the colors are vivid and I LOVE it. I paired it with my ripped-knee jeans but I wasn’t wearing makeup for this. A lot of it I was just dancing like CRAZY for because I was blasting Rainbow simultaneously! I also got the cute spaceship pin and then there’s the hat that says “Kesha” in a Rainbow font on the front and on the back is says “rainbow tour 2017”! so cute!

Some people seem mean and nasty, but I think they’re just unhappy. The body needs a good shakin’, to let the brain fill up with the good vibrations! I wanna go get down, you wanna come with me? (track 10, Boogie Feet) Dance with me, dance with me please.Or are you scared of these boogie feet?

Why waste your time in your mind? There’s no wrong, there’s no right, koo koo bananas unite; Life’s a hello, a goodbye, the last laugh then you die. I boogie ’cause I’m alive, are you scared of these boogie feet? (track 10, Boogie Feet)

I was dancing like crazy in that last one. LOL. That’s just a couple random pics. But okay, now I gotta talk about something serious. How seriously awesome it was for Danon to drive me to the Showbox SoDo (; for the concert. We blasted Kesha in the car and got some awesome videos and you are ADORABLE and I’m so thankful that you’d do things like that for me, especially because you know how much she/it all/this means to me. Cutest videos ever though I gotta add them.

And now, some awesome pictures featuring lots of random Kesha merch (it’s not random it’s all the same stuff just organized differently) and I do wanna explain more about this shit!

So this is all the Rainbow merch that I have: 2 shirts, candle, spaceship pin & bolo tie, poster, CD and Japanese bonus track CD. I’m rolling in Rainbows. I’m so in love.

Old flames can’t hold a candle to you, no one can light up the night like you do. Flickering embers of love, I’ve known one or two…but old flames can’t hold a candle to you. (track 12, Old Flames (Can’t Hold a Candle To You) duet with Dolly Parton which was originally just Dolly Parton’s song but it was written by Kesha’s mom back in the day, Pebe Sebert, and she’s always loved it so she wanted it on Rainbow even though she did a stripped version on her Deconstructed EP)

Now I wanna show you guys some funny outcast pictures. Like these are all really funny to me and I love them, and I just have such an attachment to this album it’s like glue idk.

Lol this is funny

I was high af when I did this

What even

Ok

Yup

SAme

HAHA Boogie feet

What do you get when you take Godzilla to meet your mom? He rings the bell and she looks out the window, calls the cops. I try to explain that he’s mostly tame, as long as there’s pizza and video games (; that’s what you get when you take Godzilla to meet your mom. (track 13, Godzilla. So Pebe Sebert (Kesha’s mom) also wrote this and Kesha knew a couple years back that if she were ever to actually get Rainbow made she had to have this song on it, which I think is adorable. It’s a strange song but it’s adorable and I love it. She performed it too, and that was such an experience. I wonder if I got any videos of it.) While everyone else is running and screaming, I just love being with you. I guess they don’t see all the things that I see that make you so uniquely you, you, you. What do you get when you meet Godzilla and fall in love?

So then starts Spaceship. This song is my current obsession. Spaceships are my obsession. Like I love this song and I love the meaning, I love her vocals, I loved it live and cried, I feel evolved, and I want to listen to this forever. Spaceships are everywhere in my life now. It’s like… Well, from here down, let me reference Spaceship.

I knew from the start I don’t belong in these parts. There’s too much hate, too much hurt for this heart. Lord knows this planet feels like a hopeless place, thank God I’m going back home to outer space.

I’m waiting for my spaceship to come back for me, it’s coming back for me. I don’t really care if you believe, it’s coming back for me. I been living in a lonesome galaxy but in my dreams I see them come and rescue me, look up in the sky and there they’ll be, bet you’ll think of me then. You’re gonna say “Oooh, look at that oh yeah, yeah”…Damn, if it ain’t true. They’re coming back for me, they’re coming back for me yeah.

“As I leave this earth and sail into the infinite cosmic universe…the wars, the triumps, the beauty, and the bloodshed, the ocean of human endeavor, it all grows quiet. Insignificant. I am nothing more than recycled start dust and borrowed energy, born from a rock spinning in the ether. I watch my life backwards, and forwards, and I feel free. Nothing is real, love is everything, and I know nothing.”

The bonus track is beautiful, but I think the album is more whole without it. To wrap things up, my favorite tracks are Spaceship, Let Em Talk and Boogie Feet but I love EVERY track. This is an amazing fucking album.

Try to keep my shit together, when will this get any better? I’m trying so hard not to breakdown… God I’m only human, trying to face it all, but I don’t wanna get emotional. (Japanese bonus track 15, Emotional)

But the thing is, I think she wrote and recorded that song before she found salvation within herself. Within her rainbow, and on her spaceship. She grew, she became so much stronger, and she’s able to sing so powerfully about things that make waves and affects like a shock of love-lightning striking every pole attatched to a fan’s head. I love Kesha, and I’m so grateful she exists. I’m so grateful she has this power, and I’m so grateful she’s showing me what it means to be alive and take control of my own consciousness and willpower and dreams.