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Monday, 28 February 2011

Valentines Day...

I know this is a late post and some people have certain opinions on valentines but this is mine.

Yes, it is too commercialized and you shouldn't need a day to show each other how much you love one another, this can be done any and every day of the year! However, for me, valentines is a pretty big thing! I am obsessed with hearts..I don't know anyone quite like it...most of my birthday presents I get off people are all heart related..the valentines before this, Liam even opened loads of haribo packets, took out all the hearts and put them into a big bag for me! :) It was so lovely :) I also LOVE me to you bears, especially ones with hearts on them! So, for me, to see heart balloons everywhere, just all that makes me smile enough! <3

The valentines just gone, was mine and Liam's second one together :) I went to Manchester for the weekend before and the day of so felt like we were doing something for it just doing that!

Liam is a huge Tottenham Hotspur fan and he has really got me into it! I have to admit, I am a pretty big supporter now, but love it! :) Two summers ago we went to see them play in London for the first time together :) Now, any chance we get to go and see away games, we do. We booked to see them play Sunderland on Saturday 12th February and had a lovely day trip out.

Spurs shirt I bought with official signings for Liam's 21st :)

It was a 3hour journey each way on the megabus, but it was so nice just to relax together, see new places, and for Spurs to win their game!! The atmosphere was amazing, and I would love to go again!

On the Sunday we just lazed about, we wanted the weekend to be totally relaxed! The Monday Liam had to be in uni, but at lunchtime when he came back to see me, we gave presents - (last year we decided not to do any, even though Liam spoilt me! and this year, we weren't going to, but then thought we'd do a little something...again, he spent too much!-not that i'm complaining :)

After everything that happened with my grandad, I knew I wanted to raise as much money as I could for Cancer Research and the Macmillan nurses. At my grandad's funeral this is what the donations were put towards, but I wanted to raise money myself for such a great cause.

The cancer research charity is truly inspirational, and I want to help them towards being able to hopefully one day finding a cure to cancer. If fund raising events did not happen, my grandad would not have had all the help he did get, and my dad may not have been so lucky so this means a huuuge amount!

I decided I would take part in the annual 'Race for Life' in my hometown in 2010, with my mum, a friend of hers and my best friend. Before we had begun training and fundraising for this event, we had bad news..we had been on holiday the summer of 2008 as a family, and Dad hadn't been very well. He is one of those stubborn people that doesn't like going to the doctors...says that his body will just get on with it etc etc. In the end, mum told him he had to go and get checked out as he just wasn't himself at all, and I'm so glad she, well, forced him to go!

I was at uni at the time in my second year, and didn't actually know at this point that Dad had gone to the doctors, let alone been sent to the hospital for scans! Unfortunately, it was bad news :( Being at uni, mum didn't want to tell me over the phone nor tell my brother first, so didn't let on anything bad was going on. When I went home for a weekend, mum sat my brother and I down, and said she needed to talk. This never happens, I think the last time it had, was the talk about my grandad so I panicked..

My heart sunk once the word cancer had been mentioned. Everything kind of blurred, so mum had to keep repeating things as I just wasn't hearing straight. I knew that when we heard about grandad, he had 9months and I was praying that this would not be the same. Thankfully, mum had told dad to go to the doctors in enough time so that they could start treating the cancer that had been found. Although I was terrified of losing my dad, like I did with grandad, I had to stay positive, for everyone, especially my dad! He was so scared understandably and I hated being at my first year at uni and the fact that I couldn't see him every day. I came home as much as I could to help mum with everything and just to be of a support.

Dad started chemo and radiotherapy pretty much straight away to see if an operation was needed. Quite a big one was, but I still thought then what if mum hadn't told him he HAD to go to the doctors, what if...I am just so thankful for everything, that he was seen in time. I had time off from uni whilst dad had his operation but really didn't enjoy the time in which mum was the only one that could visit, me and my brother just sat at home hoping everything was going okay. Over the time that he was in hospital, I loved going to see him, keeping him company, just telling him what we had been doing that day, having a chit chat :) He told me loads of funny stories, and had become friends with people on his ward, even starting up a fantasy football type game! I never wanted to leave him because I hated seeing him in pain and looking worried.

Thankfully, with all the help of the doctors, Dad was given the all clear at the end of 2009, and could celebrate his 60th in January 2010.

Dad and I at his 60th party :) x

This made me even more committed to raising lots of money, but also to have a great time doing it! We raised about £300 altogether, more than we anticipated, so it all felt really worth it!

Sarah, Tasha, Mum and me :) x

Again, this year mum and I are going to attempt to run the Race for Life. It is so important for us, and I can't imagine us not doing it now after all that we have gone through.

As many of you may have read in my 'about me' section, this is a huge part of my life for me, as my grandad passed away just over 3 years ago :( but my dad also had a cancer scare which will be on another post, so I'm sorry if this post goes a bit rubbish and is an essay but it feels better to get it all out!

My grandad was a truly amazing man and he is remembered every single day. I was really close to him, always round at his and my granny's house and the farm as a child through to until he died, so was understandably devastated when he had to leave us.

Apparently when me and my brother were a lot younger, there had been a cancer scare but wasn't brought up and begun to be treated without any of the grandchildren becoming aware. When it made a big reappearance a couple of years later (as we have now been told), it turned out that because of his age (thankfully he had lived a long life) that there wasn't really much that people could do. He really looked out for me, as well as the rest of my family, always making jokes and continually keeping everyone so happy.

I would have loved for him to see where I am now, to meet my boyfriend Liam as I've mentioned before as they would have got on so well, and I am sure he would have been so proud to see me so happy, doing well at uni, and generally just enjoying life. One of the things I dislike about being at uni is not being able to see people as much, in particular my Granny and Nan.

The day my brother and I were told of the news about my Grandad definitely brought us even closer together as a family, but also made me want to spend as much time with my Grandad as possible. I wanted to be there constantly to help look after him as the doctors had given him about 7-9months. Luckily, over the summer (about 6 months) he was still fighting and we all got to spend the summer with him.

It was so so hard to see him get weaker and weaker, but there was no way he wanted to go into a home or anything like that - when it was once suggested, he said he may as well give up if that was going to happen, so it was never mentioned again. Although he obviously depended on all of us to help him, he wanted to fight this battle his way. The Macmillan nurses did such a great job coming out nearly every day towards the end and I will always be thankful that it was them, that allowed him to stay in his own home, where he was most comfortable.

He also had the local vicar to come round and say a couple of prayers for Gran & Grandad every weekend, as he couldn't attend the Sunday service that he liked to. As this was the vicar that took the service at his funeral, it meant a lot that he had fulfilled wishes that my grandad had.

9months after the doctors said we should be prepared for the worst he was still here. He really was a true fighter and stayed for just over the maximum time had been predicted :)

I remember the day so clearly when my Grandad left us..I came downstairs for breakfast at just after 8am after the phone had just rung and saw Mum in floods of tears with my dad. I knew instantly, without asking that this was it. The worst was to be expected for 9months and this day had come.

Many things that have happened in my life really do make me have certain beliefs..I am not going to start preaching at you! but I know that there is someone who wanted my Grandad to be where he wanted when he died..and it was all as if it was meant to be in a weird way.

My uncles always come into Gran & Grandad's house for 11 o'clock cup of coffee on a break from their work, and they all live so close together which means we all see each other so often :)

On that particular morning, my Gran knew that this was it, and needed someone to help. As she went to the door to run and get my uncle (who lives right next door), my other uncle was just coming inside..this was what was meant to be. They helped my Grandad to his favourite chair in the conservatory, well, his chair..no one elses! where he used to sit and watch the sheep and cows all day long, and he died peacefully doing what he loved, just peacefully watching his herd :) To hear mum tell me all of this, made me so happy that it couldn't have ended more perfect.

The funeral was such a lovely service..I knew I had to be strong for everyone as we were all feeling the exact same. We expected there to be a fair few people as my grandad was such a well loved man, but as I sat by my gran in the funeral car and we pulled up we never did expect to see what we saw before us..there were hundreds! People had to be stood outside for the service as they couldn't fit in, even standing!! My Gran turned to me and said 'I can't do this,' to which I replied 'course you can' and squeezed her hand. It's weird how clear I remember everything. She held my hand so tightly whilst walking in and it made me so proud to be part of that family.

I was supposed to read out a poem I had found and asked to read, but I just knew I would break down, something I was trying so hard not to do, so my uncle read it instead for me.

The Broken Chain

We little knew that morning that God Was going to call your name.In life we loved you dearly, In death we do the same.

It broke our hearts to lose you, You did not go alone; For part of us went with you, The day God called you home.

You left us peaceful memories,

Your love is still our guide;

And though we can not see you, You are always at our side.

Our family chain is broken,

And nothing seems the same;

But as God calls us one by one, The Chain will link again.

I thought it fitted so perfectly with how we were all feeling and still do feel. I know that he will always be looking down watching me so I want to do everything to make him proud of me :)

Tuesday, 22 February 2011

This is something a friend told me to watch a while ago. She had been told to watch it, and since then it had really worked for her and so I want to share it with you..Since watching, she had job interviews for a top fashion company, her and her boyfriend had got back together, and she had a lot more good feelings than before. You may think it's a waste of time but it's hard to explain so when you have a free 20mins I advise you to watch this clip from 'the secret' video. (The very first bit seems like it is the beginning of a horror vid though!! haha.)

It is all to do with how you always attract certain things into your life...your friends, how you live, everything even things you hate about your life...you've attracted them all.

If you keep saying to yourself, "I'm going to be late," "I am so screwed with all these bills I have,"obviously you will be more aware to it all but you're also attracting it to yourself so it is ultimately going to happen.

It is hard to explain exactly how it works without watching the video, but since I watched it, it may sound stupid but I've just tried to have more positive thoughts since watching this clip, and yes, I believe it is actually working. - "If you're feeling good, you're creating a future that is on track with what you desire."

Just try it, watch this video, it won't work straight away but for me I can see how things are changing within my life...hope it works for you too!

Tuesday, 8 February 2011

Thought I'd start my very first blog post off with a bit about me and lots of photos!

I'm 21 and currently live in Leeds while I finish my final year of uni off..but my hometown is near Shrewsbury in Shropshire.

I am completely and utterly obsessed with hearts and anyone that knows me, will know this! - I don't know what it is, and mum always said I'd grow out of it, but I really haven't!! I love them!

I have naturally curly hair, but love when I've just got it done at the hairdressers and they straighten it all for me :)

The most important things in my life are: my family and my friends...they are my world!

Us at christmas minus mum who was taking the photo - she hates being in them!

I have always been very close to my family, grew up with my cousins around me (although have no baby photos on my laptop so ones from my 21st will have to do!)

I think this just sums up the relationship we all have together...and is one of my favourite photos from my 21st..us all messing and joking around!

The girls, Hannah (eldest girl cousin), Jen (youngest cousin-even though she doesn't look it! will be 18 in june!) and me!

James (eldest male cousin), (Rich - same age as me), and (my brother, 18)

We were always round at my grandparents house and are a very close knit family..as Liam always says, everyone always knows everything that's going on with everyone straight away! Although I don't really remember my dad's dad who sadly died when I was about 1, I was very close to my mum's dad who passed away just over 3 years ago :( He really looked out for me, and I would have loved for him to meet Liam and know that I had his 'seal of approval' :P I'm sure Liam would have fitted in just fine with grandad..well, better than fine, as he has a huge interest in sport, which is something my grandad would have spent hours talking about with him :) One of the things I dislike about being at uni away from home is not seeing my gran and nan as much, as well as other people! - I love getting the random phone calls off them just to know they are thinking of me :)

The cousins and my gran and grandad..who we all miss so much! x

Me and momma at my 21st :)

Moving on....I am totally a complete mummy's girl...she is my rock and I don't know where I'd be without her and I hope she knows just how much she means to me! I can tell her anything at all and I know that she would just tell me the truth, but wouldn't judge me whatsoever.

Me and dad at his 60th :)

Me and dad :)

My dad is definitely the quiet one of the household...and says that me and my mum are too alike..that's why we easily get into silly arguments! Dad is someone I can turn to when I just want a giggle....we always take the mick out of him but he knows that it's only harmless fun and I'd be lost without him.

Here are a few pics of lil old mee! If I do say so myself, I was a little cutie...what happened?! Haha! Most people hate their baby pics but I love mine, and definitely making sure that when I have children I will be taking lots of them too :)

Us two :)

Annnnd this is a photo of me and my brother when he was born :)

My brother and I are 3 years apart..although as he's grown up he looks the same age as me if not older, and am sure could get in places to go out drinking before I could!..From a young age I was very protective of him, and even now amongst all the things he does to annoy me (on purpose!) I would be there like a shot if he needed anything..

I've always seen myself as a bubbly person, although very shy around people I don't know, but once you get to know me you'll soon see there's no shutting me up!! I've been lucky that I've always had a close set of friends..although a few have grown a bit distance since being at uni, but I've met even more having gone to uni!

Helen and I (I don't drive like that anymore! ha!)

Lauren, Helen and me at playschool :)

The picture above is when I was at playschool, so about the age of 4..this is where I met one of my bestest friends anyone could wish for, Lauren. :) She's still a great friend to this day, and even going to uni 2 and a half hours away from home hasn't separated us :)

The other friend, Helen, is like a cousin to me..we grew up together and her mum is my godmother which means we see each other lots around birthdays, christmas etc. Unfortunately, I don't get to see her nearly as much as I'd like to, as she now lives up in Scotland, but their family lives near my home so we make sure to see each other when they come down to visit...at least Scotland isn't as far as Canada which is where they did live for a while...and was an amazing holiday when we went to visit!!

All of my friends and I went to the same playschool, same primary school and same secondary school, and it was after that, that some of us went separate ways. I feel so lucky that at secondary school as well as having all the close friends I had throughout everything, I was also friends with lots of others :)

All of the people I grew up with always said I was 'the popular one' which is possibly why I find it harder now that people have moved on, and have what it seems like, a lot less friends..but that's life I suppose...everyone grows up...people who want to be in your life will make that effort, and they're the ones worth sticking to!

Me ready for prom!

Secondary school prom with Lauren, Jade and Becky

Me ready to go to sixth form leavers ball :)

Some of my friends at sixth form :)

<3

At sixth form, as well as sticking with the close friends I had made since primary school minus a few, I met lots of other new friends :) including one very special person to me, Liam :) Unfortunately, we didn't get together at sixth form but stayed good friends and 3 years (ish) later when I was at uni, after seeing other people, we did!! :)....I didn't mean to hurt anyone in us getting together (if I did), but my life motto is 'Never regret anything that makes you smile,' and this really fits that. Liam and I actually have a pretty good love story behind us, and just makes me so happy every time I think about it! I do believe in fate and even more so after all that happened..if it gives you that second chance to have what you want, you really need to jump at the chance (which I did and I'm sure will be in another post at a later date)! He is my best friend, boyfriend and soulmate and I couldn't imagine ever being without him. His family are like my second family now, the amount of time I spend around there when I go home!! Through him, I've made so many new friends which makes me so happy that I get on with them all soo well :)

Liam and me N.Y.E '10

Anywayy, back to sixth form..after then, I didn't really know what I wanted to do...but I have always been interested in art so went to do a Foundation Art course year. Even after that year, I didn't know what aspect of art I wanted to go into, so applied for a course where I could do it all..which is where I am now! in my final year!! I know now that I really want to do photography of some sort or be a primary school teacher..bit of a difference! but as I've grown up I've always loved looking after younger children..so we will see what happens once I finish this course!

I've met lots of great friends while at uni, you all know who you are!...including one of my besties that I went to Hong Kong with which was amazing! However, another best friend and I, Tasha, became best friends through both of our ex's..that's all in the past, but we've made an everlasting friendship out of it! :)

About Me

I'm just your average 24 year old girl..obsessed with hearts, photography, fashion, beauty and love a good bargain!
Any questions, (readers / bloggers or PR) please just email me: ginab1989@hotmail.com xx ♥