The Blossom and the Blue-Fin Tuna

Monday, February 2, 2009

Ok, I have a small problem. I have a poster that I possibly cannot live without. You know what it looks like. You know you do. I absolutely have to hang it in my apartment. I just don't know where. I fear that if I hang it, I will bring my classy bachlorette pad down to a college dorm room. Yet, if I don't hang it somewhere visible, I feel I am denying an essential part of my personality in all of its quirkyness. In all of its Yvette-ness. So, do I hang it in my bedroom? The shoe/massage room? The hallway? The kitchen? I know I don't want to hang it in my living room, but it must be hung. It must be hung. Sigh.Love,YvettePS- If you don't know me, here is what it looks like.

Have I abandoned this blog?--No.Have I simply been very busy?--Yes.Do I intend to return to this blog?--I sincerely hope so.What have I been doing all this time?--Well.....1) I applied for a new job, had an interview and made it to the top 3. Then the position was froze due to our lovely state budget issues. It may or may not thaw out. Same work I do now, but down at the hospital level and (so I thought) safe from state budget cut issues like my current job is. 2) Decided to have a work mid-life crisis which led to many sleepless nights. I'm trying to find a way to make following my dreams and earning money and being a productive member of society NOT mutually exclusive. 3) I've joined a Lance Armstrong Foundation LiveSTRONG Challenge team. Me and my bike, 100 miles, San Jose, July 12th. I will be hitting you up for your money to meet my fundraising goal of $1,107.01 4) Half Dome: The Rematch. It's still on, we just don't know when. Possibly June or late September. My friends and I are still trying to nail down a date. 5) My friend and colleague Carolyn who was diagnosed with an aggressive brain cancer died last month. It was painful to watch her deteriorate. I'm glad her pain is over now, but I'm saddened by my loss. Also, since we worked together at the central registry, the mourning is compounded by the fact that now we are one man down. Work stress is elevated right now. 6) Instead of drowning my stress and sadness with bottles of reposado or anejo tequila (and yes, I can drink it straight up without making a face) I have been distracting myself to past the point of obsession with the Twilight series. From January 1 to January 28, I read the entire Twilight series plus the partial manuscript Midnight Sun (Twilight, from Edward's perspective) not once, but twice, AND saw the movie Twilight in the theatre 7 times. In my defense, it's not my most seen movie. Back in 1998-ish I saw Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon in the theatre 8 times. I fully admit, Edward makes me swoon. The book Edward, not the movie Edward. In my opinion, the adaptation didn't do any of the characters justice, especially Alice.7) The soda issue: I am still Coke free. If I make it to tomorrow night (Tuesday) 8:00pm, I will be soda free for 12 weeks!!! 12 weeks, is my record from 5 years ago. I saved 8 for last since it's happy news (depending who you ask).8) I'm moving! Got a place of my own- way past due. WAY WAY past due. A simple apartment, two bedrooms one bathroom. A room for me, and a room for my shoes (I own more pairs of Chaco's than allowable by law- I love you REI!). I'm halfway moved in, only because I'm not taking any time off from the day job (see #5 above). I'm very tempted to leave the living room empty, gives me a good space to dance (see #2). What stops me is that my sofa would look ridiculous in the dining room and my massage table is already destined for the shoe room. I'll figure something out. Did I mention that this is way past due?That's it for now. Have I lost my mind?--Probably....Love,Yvette

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Yes, it has been a while since I last posted. I have been spending my time reading some books and thinking about stuff.

I have decided to not post as much. I want to go from quantity to quality. I want to slow down and savor life. There are lots of things that I would rather be out doing than sitting here trying to recount my day. If I were a more interesting person, doing more interesting things, maybe it would be worth it. But on a daily basis, I’m just not that interesting of a person.

I’m still going to continue blogging, because I have some genuinely interesting projects coming up, just expect a post once a week. I definitely recommend adding me to your Google reader, so my updates will come to you, instead of you checking my site daily for updates.

If you’re interested in reading my random thoughts throughout the day, you can follow me on Twitter. It’s easy to sign up and easy to use. If you don’t want to get sucked into it, you can read my tweets from here on my blog directly. It’s up to you.

This past Tuesday, December 16th, has been 5 weeks without Coke. Personally, I am amazed. I would normally have caved by now. I still feel strong in my resolve. I wish what has been my influence came years ago. I think a friend from my past, Kara, would be proud. I haven’t had any conventional candy bars either. So far I’ve only had one chocolate bar that fit the bill. It was free trade, organic, and didn’t contain HFCS. Oh, almost forgot, haven’t had any potato or corn chips either. It sounds like I’ve gone quite militant, n’est-ce pas? Maybe I have, maybe not. Blame REI, blame Michael Pollan, blame that I’m a liberal, blame turning 35, or blame not making it to the top of Half Dome. Blame all of the above, or none of the above. I don’t think the reason matters much to me, quite honestly. All I know right now is that I’m having some surprising results. J This hasn’t come all of a sudden out of the blue. It’s been growing little by little for some time now. Part of it is the slowing down.

I had started telling a story about myself, but I removed it because it wasn’t really necessary. I spoke of growing up in the 80’s and never learning to make tortillas from scratch. Basically I was posing a theory that I had sabotaged my future eating habits growing up because I had refused to learn how to cook.

So what projects do I have coming up worth sharing? The Half Dome rematch is a big one. I still haven’t determined a date. May feels too early, August too hot. I like the thought of early June, but I know that June and July are the busiest months to hike Half Dome. I just want to make sure that I won’t have to worry about another storm on the horizon.

I mentioned this next one before, as I was contemplating even attempting it. I have made up my mind, and I have made the commitment: I have joined a LiveSTRONG challenge team. I have committed to raising $1,107.01 for the Lance Armstrong Foundation, and I will finally (FINALLY) be riding in my first century. (I’ve only ridden metrics in the past). In case some of you are wondering why such an odd amount of money, it’s because my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer on 11/07/01. The ride takes place during July in San Jose. I wish Lance could be there, but I’m pretty sure he won’t because he’ll be in France riding in Le Tour. Don’t panic yet-- I plan on waiting until after this holiday season before I start my passionate plea for your money.

Oh, and that thing that I wrote of previously, I have decided NOT to do it. I can’t. It’s just way too personal. I sense the contradiction in that statement, I’m blogging about my life for potentially all the world to see, yet wanting to maintain a sense of privacy. It’s times like this that I’m relieved that less than ten people read my blog. (And that’s on a good day)

There is one last thing, but I can’t talk about it just yet. It wouldn’t be prudent. If you are my friend on Facebook, you already know. I promise all will be revealed as soon as I think it is acceptable to do so. Definitely sometime in January, I think.

Monday, November 24, 2008

How are you? I'm doing okay. Nothing major going on. This past Saturday I put in some hours at REI. Felt really good to be wearing my green vest again. I missed that place. It's my peeps. REI is genuinely the best retail job I have ever had. I do have to admit that I might not feel the same way if REI was my only job, the one I rely on for my livelyhood. Since I don't rely on that job, it's not really a job. No stress, nothing to take home, I leave the job at the job. I go in, I be myself- that friendly person you all know and love: I sing, I dance, I laugh, I help customers, I share experiences with them. I love asking my customers where they are going. Talking shop, I suppose. It's great, I love it.

I spent two weeks ago in Porterville. Good time to catch up on my reading. I read a very good book about the origin of some of the foods we eat in Omnivore's Dilemma. I definitely will be doing more research on what I read.Early last week I was working in Merced at the Cancer Center, and Friday I worked at the Treatment Center in Porterville. Now those of you who are my Facebook friends and/or follow me on Twitter, you heard that I had lunch with a certain doctor. Yes, it's true I did have lunch with him, but my sin of omission was that I was not the only one he took to lunch. There was five of us all together. I would not have minded having lunch alone with him, but alas, it was not to be.

It's time to pull out the bike again. I've been invited to participate in a LiveSTRONG Challenge. A century bike ride in July that is a fundraiser for the Lance Armstrong Foundation. I want to do it. But I'm scared. Not of the 100 miles. I'll be able to do that defintely. It's the fund raising part that scares me. Those skills suck. So if I do decide to do it, please look kindly and favorably on my pathetic plea for your money. If you also see me out on the loop (up Auberry, down Friant) say hi and throw out some encouraging words for a fellow cyclist. That's pretty much it. Getting ready for Thanksgiving. I'm baking my yams again. The kids love it. It's all the high-fructose corn syrup that goes in it. This will most likely be my last year baking yams because I'm on an anti-high-fructose corn syrup (HFCS) kick right now and I'm massively reducing my intake. It's been very hard since it's nearly in everything that isn't raw food (fruits, veggies, meats/seafood). One good thing that's come out of this is that I haven't had a Coke in almost 13 days. Amazing since I am a serious Coke fiend and it has been my biggest single weakness in every attempt to lose weight over these years. Another amazing thing is that I am currently not even tempted in the slightest. Even another amazing thing is that in these past almost 13 days, I have lost weight, without really trying. The things that make you go hmmmm. Okay, I'm out. Off to Merced again tomorrow. Going to be doing some casefinding at the path lab. Happy Thanksgiving to you all!!!

Friday, November 7, 2008

The main reason I am giving you the quick and dirty update is because I'm going out of town next week for work and I will be gone all week. Good thing cats are easier to leave with a sitter than kids!!!Work has been busy. Every October is a major reporting deadline. Hospitals report to the central registry (me), we report to the state registry, the state reports to the feds in Washington D.C.- okay, technically Virginia. So, since Half Dome I've been working with my head down trying to get all my cases in before what is known as a "call for data". It's the first step in all studies and trials. That is over and now we start a whole new cycle of investigation for the new reporting year.Halloween was a blast. My costume this year was Ugly Betty. I sooooo rocked the costume. For those of you that don't know, my family takes Halloween very seriously. We plan our costumes months in advance. This is how serious we are. I am already thinking of what I want to be next year. I have to think of several possibilities because I won't know exactly what my situation will be next year. I might be single, I might have a boyfriend, I won't know until then. We have a costume contest with prizes, and I have found that partner costumes fair better than an individual costume. I actually won a prize this year! I won third place. Second place was Granny and Jed from the Beverly Hillbillies, and first place was Mr & Mrs Homie the clown. Their schtick was hilarious. This year was a pretty good year for me because I ended up wearing my costume for three parties. I've never gone that many before. It would have been one more, but my shift at REI was cut.Speaking of REI, business has been slow, so I have had zero hours. I'm not hurting for money, but I am a little bummed that I'm not earning any Christmas money for gifts just yet. I'm certain once we get into the Christmas season my hours will pick up. I miss my co-workers. I'm pretty much there to hang out with all my friends than to actually earn some money. One of my co-workers has left to take a position at our Encinitas store. I will miss her, but I'm excited about the potential future road trips. Of course this is a huge leap of faith on my part. My car does not like to drive south. It only knows how to drive north, but I have friends down in LA I miss and want to see them soon. Especially before Jenny's wedding date!Back to Half Dome. It's going to be a reoccuring theme in this blog. I should just rename my blog The Blossom and the Half Dome :) I have a tentative date set for August 2009, but it will all really come down to when campsites are available. I want definite summer, so storms won't be as much of an issue, and later so the water level is low enough that the Mist Trail won't be so Misty and therefore slippery. I will keep you posted as that develops.I thought I was going to have to cancel my gym membership but it turned out that I didn't have to. I'm glad because I'm going to train right this time, and I really do still want to make it to the top of the climbing wall. I don't know why, but I just do. I may never make it out to do trad climbing out in nature, but at least I want to have some climbing skills.

This kind of brings me to a new topic so to speak I'm contemplating bringing to my blog. Key word CONTEMPLATING. This thought absolutely terrifies me. Two of my favorite blogs are Fat Cyclist and Ragamuffin Soul. Both of these blogs have tackled the weight issue. The original goal of Fat Cyclist was to chronical Elden's (aka Fatty) effort from going from a fat cyclist to a thin one. He called this tool humiliation. Carlos at Ragamuffin Soul recently renamed his weight loss topic Ragamuffintop Challenge. Carlos called this tool public accountability. Sounds less painful but just as vulnerable.I don't know, it's a terrifying prospect. It scares me on several levels. One, that I have to admit to all the weight I gained over the last ten years. Two, what if it's not enough and I'm just not disciplined enough to do this. I've already failed at Weight Watchers twice. But... there is so much I miss: *insert heavy sigh here* I miss dancing, terribly. Oh you cannot imagine how much I miss it. I don't need to quit my jobs and move to New York and audition for a company. If I was physically able to take a class once a week, be it ballet or modern, it would feel so wonderful to move like that again. To express, to emote, like that. Words- and grammar- don't come easily to me. I can't find words to express what are whole thoughts in my head, which is why I talk so flipping much. I'm better with body language which is why my emotions are so transparent. Yes, I'm rambling.Okay, back on subject. Another thing I can't help thinking about is the fact that I wanted to lose twenty pounds for Half Dome and didn't. I keep thinking that had I been disciplined enough to lose the weight, it would have made me fast enough to make it to the summit. It's an agonizing what-if. I love dancing and I love hiking and I love facing my fear at the climbing wall. I hate that my body is not able to do what my spirit wants to do. On a side note it also really sucks that I don't fit into any of the clothes I sell at REI. Our largest sizes in the store are a 14-16. Extended sizes are available online for the REI brand clothes but it's not on all items. But I want to wear the other brands too.Well that's pretty much what's going on with me. Oh, wait. I forgot something. After Half Dome I went to the California Academy of Sciences. It’s a really cool place if you’ve never heard of it before. It’s a natural history museum, an aquarium, a planetarium, and now they’ve added a rainforest exhibit. Back in September CAS reopened after having a new building built. It’s green and very recycled, and I love it. I have pictures, but I haven’t been able to get around to formatting them. Well, I’m going back tomorrow, because I really like the place, and I’m taking my niece Sarah with me. I’m excited because I love sharing educational stuff with “my kids” even though it goes in one ear and out the other-- Proof they are my sister’s kids and not my own.Here’s a Halloween picture of me as Ugly Betty:Love, Yvette

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

An interesting thing happened on the way to work today. I stopped by my 7-11 that's right around the corner from my office to pick up a cup of coffee and a newspaper. As I was serving my yummy cherry cappucino I could hear a dude complaining about the outcome of the presidential election. I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying, but he was upset and therefore loud, so it was hard to ignore him. All I heard was: "Blah blah blah... I can't believe Florida voted for him... blah blah blah... He has ties to the Russian mafia... blah blah blah... People just fell for it because he's charismatic... blah blah blah"

I felt really sorry for the cashier, poor girl. The guy looked like the type that would stand there and talk her ear off until someone told him to stop. An object in motion will stay in motion until acted upon by an external, unbalanced force. And, quite frankly, she looked like the type of girl who didn't want to be rude and ask him to stop. I guess that would make me the unbalanced force. Unbalanced force- yup sounds just like me ;)So I put my stuff on the counter in front of him, forcing him to step back from the counter. I said in my uber-polite voice (The voice I use when I'm trying to sweet-talk my way into an uncooperative doctor's medical records), "I'm sorry, but I have to get to work." He said, "That's okay, I understand, I have to get to work too." He talked through my entire transaction, but I wasn't listening. He ended with, "You have a good day sweetheart." I turned to him, flashed him my awesome smile and said, "I will, because it's a beautiful day." Before I got to the door, I turned to him -- and yes, this is where I asked for it-- I said, "Don't be a sore loser, it's not cool" then walked out the door. Of course the dude followed suit. As I was unlocking my door he said to me, "If I were a sore loser, I'd probably call you a bitch right now, but I'm not." To which I replied still in my nicey-nice voice, "You just did. Have a good day sir, and God bless you." To that we both got in our vehicles and drove away.Yeah, uhm, wow.Love, Yvette

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Starting on a tanget. Bones isn't on tonight, so I'm watching Pushing Daisies. It's cute!Man oh man! It has been a million years since Half Dome, it feels. It has been a challenge to return to my life. Truthfully, it has been a challenge to return to my life. I came back a mess, somewhat in pieces, because I didn't make it to the top. Fortunately, I came back in big pieces, not shattered, so I know I can be put back together again. I know life is full of color; but sometimes I get stuck in black and white thinking. Half Dome was one of those moments. Do or do not- there is no try. I did not go up to Yosemite to try hiking Half Dome. I went up there to do it. Failure was not an option on the table. Yes, there was fear, but it was fear of failure more than anything else to be afraid of. More than my fear of heights, spiders, and blue M&Ms. I would have eaten a whole bag of blue M&Ms and stepped on a spider (I can't kill spiders, I have to be rescued) if would have avoided me my epic fail. The fact that the last 400 feet (the cables) are the scariest and most dangerous part of the hike goes to show that I was willing to fight through my fear of heights to get'er done.There's more to be said, but Criminal Minds is coming on and tonight's episode has Wil Wheaton in it. But don't worry, I'm okay. What doesn't kill me, makes me stronger. I'm already working on a plan, for Half Dome 2: The Rematch! :)Love, YvettePS- My Yosemite pictures are up. They suck, but they are there. Take a peak if you haven't already. Hit my Flickr link!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

My whole two pictures from my Half Dome trip are up at Flickr now. Check it out. Link is on my list on the right ----->Love, YvettePS- Hub sighting on Sunday. I saw Vera Guerrero from high school!! Her name is Kennedy now, but she looks pretty much exactly the same!

Monday, October 6, 2008

Yeah,yeah, yeah, I'm still thinking about it. I will be for a while. A bad thing, because I like to obsess. A good thing, because it shows me that I haven't given up. I will try again, and I will make it to the top. Through the hike, all I could see was the backside of Half Dome. Coming around a bend, this was the first glance of Half Dome from the side. When I got to my stopping point, I did not want to take any pictures. I did not want any documentation of my failure. On my way back down, I started cooling down, and when I returned to this particular bend, I changed my mind.

So this picture is a picture of a little further back than as far as I had gone.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

My cell phone epic failed me on this trip. I could only squeeze out one tweet, and I wasn't 100% sure it went through.So in a nutshell, I did not make it. Missed it by that much. For those of you familar with the trail, I had my epic fail at the base of the final staircase. About a mile from the very top. I felt totally tapped, and I still had to make it back down. I had hiked for about 8.5 hours already, and regardless of where I stopped, it was still only half way. And to make things more hopeless, there was a storm rolling in. So unless I totally booked it - which I absolutely could not- I wouldn't be able to beat the storm to the summit. I'm just giving you a recap, I need time to recover physically and emotionally. The emotionally part, those of you who know me can remember how upset I get when I do not have a favorable outcome. And unfortunately, there are very few picture of the trip. I'm just glad I came home with my camera. I wanted to chuck it over the side of the mountain. Love, Yvette

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Depending on how my action list goes tomorrow, this may be my last post before my journey. I would love to finish my countdown, but I have a lot of things to accomplish tomorrow morning.

The weather has me nervous. There is no guarantee of good weather. If the weather is bad, we won't hike. Man o man, I do not want to imagine how disappointed I will be if that happens. It's supposed to rain on Saturday, hard. That is going to be fun, but I admit I would be willing to put up with some Saturday rain in exchange for a beautiful Friday.

Another slight bummer is that I'm not taking my tent. :( Since we have limited space available in our campsites, I've agreed to share a big tent with others. Boo.

I can't believe the time has come. I can't believe it's already here. These past 3 months have flown by so fast, it crazy. I'm excited, and to a certain degree I still can't believe it's actually happening. Maybe part of me thought that I would never actually do it. I still don't quite believe it. It will start feeling real to me tomorrow when I'm in the Valley.

So just in case you don't hear from me tomorrow, wish me luck, and say a prayer for me. I'm going to need all the help I can get. :)

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

At least the sky is improving. Top picture is at 12:30 this afternoon. I've been checking the park site and NOAA, things should definitely be clearer by Friday. I'm getting soooooooo excited!!!!!!

This bottom picture is at 3:45 this afternoon. It's looking good. Wow, I can't believe we're at three days!!!! Sigh, I'm excited.

Today I made a promise to Carlos, owner of my favorite Half Dome video, that if I made it to the base of the cables, that I would continue on. It's a promise that I really want to keep.I feel that as my days are winding down, that my posts are getting lamer and lamer. They are. It's because I am running out of things to say. Do you have any questions for me? I guess if you want, you can ask me any questions about my trip and I'll try to answer before I go. I really can't think of anything else.Love, Yvette

Monday, September 29, 2008

See this picture? This is a web cam shot from today!!!! Not cool, not cool. This sucks. I’m keeping my fingers crossed. If we have clouds like this on Friday, chances are we won’t hike. There is no ascending the cables in inclement weather. Lightning strikes Half Dome every month of the year. People have died up there from ascending when they should not have. So the sun better shine on Friday!!!!

In 99% unrelated news, it’s been one year this past Saturday (9/27) that I found Carlos’ Half Dome you tube video. It was a year ago that I first voiced (to you) my desire to hike Half Dome. I think that’s kind of cool.

In 115% unrelated news I thinks it’s kind of strange that I know four Carlos’.

Oh, I forgot to tell you. Yesterday I got an employee appreciation award at REI. (Read: employee of the month) Not too shabby, eh?

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Getting closer, getting closer!!! Had my meeting tonight, we worked on organizing campsites, car pooling, timing and plans. As of today, the cables are still up. My friend who was on the ledge is still in. Now it's packing time! Woo-Hoo!!!

About Me

I am a blossom, a spiral, a shing. I am quiet. I am loud. I listen. I annoy. I like Science. I am imaginative. I am literal. I am passionate. I am pensive. I love, and I love some more. I am willing to try new things. I am dark and twisty. Worst of all I am warped because I loved high school. Don't be afraid to talk to me, I'm just really really shy.

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