How to raise a happy child (ages 2 to 4)

Member comments

MrsMiggins,I think it's nice to share stories like that of DesiDaddy. Stories from other parents help us relate to each other and gain a better understanding of the world of parenting. Even if you find stories about parenting that differ from your own style.

I'm sure your son is happy. Children are generally more attached to their mothers at this age, I believe. However, I watched a show on TV years ago that had a comment that stuck with me all these years: "The best thing you can do for your child is to love your partner." Kids learn how to interact with people by copying our actions, so your relationship with your husband is shaping the person your son will become. Usually, kids personalities are developed by the age of seven. I would make it a point to work out your problems with your husband. You loved each other enough to marry so I'm sure there is lots of love hidden beneath all the bickering. A good book to read is "Getting the Love You Want" and if you can afford it, I would suggest a session or two of couples counseling. The counselor can help you learn to communicate better and acts as an unbiased soundboard. Everyone would be happier if you two could communicate better. Imagine a life with less yelling!

I was actually enlightened by my 2 1/2 year old daughter when I asked her if she was happy. She said, "Yes, because I love you." That was very grounding, I thought. So now if we're having an argument and she asks me if I'm happy, I say "Yes, because I love you. But I would like it more if you (finish eating, take your nap, or whatever we're discussing) ...".

This article makes me wonder about my son...He's 2 now and he seems to be happy most of the time. He plays, shares, smiles, etc...But sometimes I notice him covering his eyes when theres something unfamiliar or 'scary' on tv...And he is very clingy to me...I mean, he's a sweetheart though. He'll reach for me and give me big hugs, etc... But the problem is, unfortunately, for the biggest part of his life he had to witness arguing between his father and I.. As much as I tried to avoid it, it happened pretty often. When my husband would start yelling, i would make him leave and then comfort my son. I feel like this is why he's so close to me..? I mean, sometimes he won't even eat for his father but when I give him a bite he'll eat from me. I guess my question is--would he be considered unhappy?? The only negative signs are attatchment and covering his eyes?! And if so, is this going to effect him for the rest of his life?? =\

In response to the question from the mother of two. I'm a young mother and my daughter turned two recently, but it may help to ask about their time with them and mention well maybe next time you could do this activity or something similar. Talk positively about the events they share and about the stepmother and father. I hope this was helpful and I am sure your children are happy with you :p Reading through the article though, I found the biggest thing was that if you're happy, they're happy, so I think being positive while approaching this touchy subject would help. Good luck.

My children and 2 and 4. As of now they are in Vegas with their dad and stepmother, and I am in Florida. They always tell me they want to come home but a while back their stepmother told me that my daughter woke in the middle of the night screaming that I was going take her from them and she wouldn't see them anymore. I know that they are going to miss their other family, but how will I know if they are truly happy here with me when I get them back? And what could I do to make it a little smoother for them?

I'm divorced from my son's father, and right now thre's a big physical separation. I know it's tough on my son, and it makes me very sad and nervous for him. I've found, though, that the best thing I could do was give him plenty of one-on-one time with me and to not try to avoid his feelings. It's tough when he tells me he misses his dad, seeing as how we didn't exactly leave off as best of friends, and it's hard not to feel rejected or even a bit hurt. But I have found that if I respond with "I know sweetie, and it's okay. he misses you too and you'll see him soon" even though it's harder on me it helps him out and that's the point of it all, right?

to the first comment my 4 and a half year old does the same.. but my husband is gone a lot in the military. I think it's a security issue .. so much at that age they have no control over, but parents are the one thing they can rely on to feel safe. as for the second comment my two boys do the same.. my youngest is just 1 so I imagine it will be worse.. as moms we want the best for our kids but we cannot divide ourselves in two. Make sure in the time you have if possible to set aside a special time for each of them where it is just them. Maybe the older one, after the younger is in bed..and the younger while the older takes a bath. Just something to allow them each their own mommy time.. it's what I do.. and while it does not erase the arguing over me.. it does ease it.. at the end of the day.. they just both love their mommy.. and that's a sign that your doing the right thing regardless!

I think my boys (ages 3.8 and 2) are generally happy -- they love to laugh and play. They hum and sing to themselves while they do things on their own like get dressed or do a puzzle. My biggest concern is their fight for my attention. My older one throws tantrums, or withdraws if his brother decides to join in our play time. If the scenario is reversed, then it's my younger one who reacts by getting aggressive. I work full-time, so I try my best to spend LOTS of quality time with them, both individually and together. They're positively angels when I'm alone with one and the other is not around, but it's a different story when they're both around each other. They are affectionate towards each other, but act out when it comes to my attention. They love their Dad, but it's always me they want. They're both VERY attached to me, but I'm not sure how to deal with these distress signals and this competition for my individualized attention. Am I doing something wrong? Any suggestions?

my son laughs and giggles at all time even when he cries so that might mean that his a happy little boy. I'm trying my best for him to be a happy little boy and so that he won't go through what i went through my childhood. I want the best for him.

The happiness of our children is paramount above other considerations; we as parents need to ensure that happiness radiate around us. A happy family makes happy children BUT we most spend quality time with them.

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