When one imagines the organisation of a wedding, one always imagines that the
whole thing is put together by the bride and her mother and that the groom's
tasks extend to no more than accepting congratulatory rounds in the pub and buying a few trinkets for the best man and ushers.

One imagines wrong.

The groom's duties start at the beginning of the whole affair with the purchase
of the engagement ring. The first few months of organisation are when the major
decisions of wedding and reception venues are decided as well as the choice
of photographer, videographer and caterer. The decision also has to be made
as to what kind of wedding it should be. It would be unfair to the bride to
expect her to reach any of these decisions alone.

Next comes the guest list; who is to be invited to the ceremony and who to
the evening festivities? The groom should co-ordinate this with that of his
parents and present a finalised list to the bride's mother.

The Wedding Day

The bridegroom and the best man should arrive at the wedding venue about twenty
to thirty minutes before the service is due to start. The groom would generally
not engage in much conversation during this time but would wait quietly, seated
on the right front pew or row of seats.

After the ceremony and signing of the registry the groom walks back up the
aisle with his new wife on his left and then usually on to the formal photographs.

After the photographs the next event is the reception. The bride and groom
stand at the end of the reception line up and at this time the groom should
introduce the bride to members of his family or his friends who she has not
already met.

The meal and speeches are next and the groom's speech follows that of the bride's
father. His speech should thank everyone who helped organise and who contributed
to the wedding, to thank the bride's parents for giving him their daughter and
should always end with a thank you and toast to the bridesmaids.

Following the meal and the speeches comes the cutting of the cake, and then
shortly afterwards the first dance. Traditionally, the bride's father cuts in
and the groom invites the bride's mother to dance. The bride's father cuts in
again and the groom resumes the dance with his new wife.

After this, the bride and groom have no more duties as such, and can spend
the rest of the evening mingling, dancing and chatting.

If you are leaving on honeymoon from the reception you should change at the
reception venue, make sure the best man and bridesmaids are left in charge of
any clothing and gifts that you may leave behind. If you are not leaving from
the reception and plan to stay until the end, get the best man and chief bridesmaid
to make sure that everyone knows this, since some people won't expect to leave
until the bride and groom have done so.