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Thursday, 31 July 2014

Symptoms of post-marathon
depression match those associated with general depression. The person’s
thoughts become negative and his energy level is drastically diminished. He
might experience feelings of anxiety, irritability and despair. Runners experiencing
depression commonly have difficulty concentrating, loss of appetite and erratic
sleeping patterns.

I didn’t run a marathon, yet the above symptoms
resonated.It wasn’t something I’d heard
of to be honest, until reading a book the other week when this subject cropped
up.As the author listed the symptoms, I
was mentally ticking them off, yep got that, that too…

It’s safe to say my walking and health have plummeted since
coming back from Nepal.It wasn’t
supposed to work like that.It was meant
to be a springboard, a reward for a year of work.In the 10 weeks after coming back I have gained
16kgs (Over 2.5 stone or 35Ilbs), daily steps dropped by a daily average of
10,000 and the number of walks completed stood at a mighty 2.

I was always going to cut some slack for a week or 2, I
deserved it after all.2 weeks become 3,
then 4 and all the gains drifted past.I
could see it happening, I could see the scales going the wrong way and the
clothes getting tighter.

The JMT is now looking impossible.Confidence is shot.Walking in the wilderness needs a bit of
training and a modicum of health.I have
neither.

My heart says ‘sod it, just wing it like usual’; my head
is full of doubt.The flights and hotels
are booked, so I can’t waste them?Right?