Genghis Khan, Motherfucker!

“Genghis Khan, Motherfucker! sprang wholly formed from the steppes of the Willamette
Valley, like warriors sown from dragon’s teeth. We ride fearlessly (but always with helmets and bike lights, because that’s just good sense) across the empire carved out with a ruthless intellect and a uncanny skill at lifting up little plastic monkeys by their arms. The Sexagon? Done. The Septacular, The Octogasm? The very names were invented to enshrine our glory. 2008 Trivia Champions? Modestly, Fuck Yeah! No venue has been spared our restless hunger for gift certificates, Pabst gear, and victory.

And yet, would victory be so sweet against unworthy foes? We say thee NAY! ShanRock invites the finest and boldest of competitors to her arena, and there is where the mettle of the great is truly tested. Has victory slipped from our grasp because Greg is occasionally convinced that all rap music “sounds just like Jay-Z”? Certainly. Have we on occasion lacked the comprehensive knowledge of Adam Sandler’s oeuvre that would guarantee victory? Sadly, yes. Toss Across? The devil mocks our beanbag prowess time and time again…. but, we digress. When Titans clash over Natalie Portmanteau, we are there. When sweat drips from straining brow in dim, smoky barlight, trying to catch little plastic fish with a tiny magnetic fishing pole, there too are we. When five faces emote “WTF?” and ten shoulders shrug right after the token sports question, oh yeah, that’s definitely us.

So when you find yourself, like Butch Cassidy, saying “Who are those guys?”, know that the answer is ‘Genghis Khan, Motherfucker!’”