What is a friend?

Friday, June 3, 2011

Webster's dictionary defines a friend as one attached to another by affection or esteem, and while that seems like it may be a correct definition, a "true" friend is so much more. I always thought that the term friend had to mean so much more than that, a "true" friend has so many more facets than just what the brains at Webster's seem to think go into a friend or for that matter a friendship, so this is my opinion of what a true friend or friendship is...

Here we go....

I've known many people over the years, but I would only consider about a handful that I would consider a "friend", a friend to me is someone that you can always trust with either the most important or most trivial thoughts and issues, without judgement or ridicule, not someone that looks at you and tries to tell you what you should look like, talk like and be like, that will listen to you at 3 am without batting so much as an eyelash...when you are so far down in the gutter that you cannot even see daylight, so many times I have found myself in need of my truest friends to help guide me through this miserable thing we call life, not that it's always miserable, but the most miserable parts of it.

Are you with me so far...?

So many I have encountered in my life say...I'm your friend, I would never betray the trust that we have, and then before you know it, you're standing there with the bloody knife in your back...thinking...How the fuck did this happen?!A great lie is realized when you remove said knife from your back, and when does the reality and fantasy of "true friendship become blurred? I don't think I'll ever know the reason, but all I can say is this...FRIENDSHIPS HURT!!!

Now that's not to say that I haven't had really good friends that I would die for, and walk through fire for, because I have and I do...I have had true friends that have done things for me that no one on earth would do, and I'm not talking bailing me out of jail for instance, I'm sure they would, its just that it's never come to that...yet...LOLIt takes "true" friend to deal with me at times...not that I'm so high maintenance in the needs department, just that I have issues...(don't we all???)

But I'm rambling for the moment, let's stay on point, shall we?

Back to the issue at hand...

A friend is someone that doesn't necessarily have to have everything in common with you, look like you, act like you or any of the KLIQish bullshit that comes with a "normal" friendship, you can be a makeup wearing freak and have a straight laced redneck punk as your best friend, true friendship has no bounds...there doesn't have to ANY boundaries when it comes to a "true" friendship...you can be a gothic vampire goddess and be best friends with the prissiest glamour girl on earth...a straight up metal head and a die-hard country music fan can...remember there are NO boundaries when it comes to friendship and "true" friends...A friend is on that you can count on to hold your hand when you have lost everything that has ever mattered in your life...whether it be the passing of a parent, child or even a family pet...a real friend is one that can sense something isn't right when everyone else around you doesn't even realize what hell you are living with inside because of the connection that you share...A friend is one that does for you and you do for them without ever wanting anything in return...so many beggars and hangers-on just cant wait to see what they can bleed from you, but a "true" friend will always just be there when there's nothing to be gained, just to be a decent, caring person...

So that's my take on the issue at hand...I may have not covered it as completely as some may...but it's what I feel on it....if I've missed anything, let me know...it's a big world, and there are many "true" friends for us all, we just have to weed through the bad ones, to find the "jewels in the rough" as it were...