‘Ruzwana Bashir bravely came forward about her own experiences of abuse in the Pakistani community, and the cultural issues that have contributed to the idea of shame around those who come forward.’ Photograph: Rex

The truth is that Muslims have also been silent victims of sexual abuse. Alexis Jay’s report last week raised a number of concerning points regarding the sexual abuse victims of Pakistani heritage, stating that: “The Board should address as a priority the under-reporting of exploitation and abuse in minority ethnic communities.” She went on to conclude that “one of these myths was that only white girls are victims of sexual exploitation by Asian or Muslim males, as if these men only abuse outside of their own community, driven by hatred and contempt for white females. This belief flies in the face of evidence that shows that those who violate children are most likely to target those who are closest to them and most easily accessible.”

Ruzwana Bashir bravely came forward on the weekend about her own experiences of abuse in the Pakistani community, and the cultural issues that have contributed to the idea of shame around those who come forward. This shame is not just restricted to Pakistani culture. I grew up as part of a mixed Muslim community made up of people from many different backgrounds. First-hand accounts from young girls who had been groomed by older men online or at school were not unusual. Girls as young as 13 or 14 were being targeted by those who played on their vulnerabilities. Because many of these girls were already hiding some of what they were doing from their parents, it was difficult for them to speak out when things escalated out of hand.

One girl of Moroccan descent, aged 14, lied to her parents so that she could go for dinner with someone she had met online. He was 21. She felt she couldn’t tell anyone afterwards that she had been raped. As teenagers, we became aware that some younger guys were being recruited by much older men in London who would send them out to find “nice young Muslim girls”, preferably virgins.

The UK Muslim Women’s Network published a report in September 2013 that looked into cases of sexual exploitation of Asian girls and women. It highlighted that they were most vulnerable to men from their own communities who were conscious of cultural norms, using them to manipulate victims into not reporting their abuse. Although based on a small study of 35 cases, the report warned that girls, from mostly Pakistani Muslim backgrounds, were “not being made aware of the predatory nature of some men and boys, and the consequences of being lured by them – they are not being adequately warned in order to safeguard themselves”.

It also said that consequently “most victims had not received or been supported by long-term aftercare and when the family became aware of any abuse they re-victimised them, which meant not believing them, blaming them, forcing them into a marriage, forcing them to leave the family home and in one case forcing the victim to have hymen repair surgery prior to a forced marriage”.

Of course, sexual abuse is not inherent in Islam. It should also be pointed out that this is a problem that needs to be tackled by the community, not a feature that defines it. However, the importance given to reputation, public image and taboo makes it difficult to access and support girls living in some Muslim communities. When authorities are failing girls without these complications, there is little hope for those who fear the response of their families or communities.

There was a feeling among my friends that the charities that dealt with child abuse wouldn’t know how to deal with the complexities of the situations facing children from ethnic minorities. Whether true or not, this image needs to change. More women from ethnic minority communities involved in establishing lines of communication for girls who otherwise remain voiceless would help, as would education for girls about the risks they face, how they can protect themselves and who is available to support them. Schools need to deal with the uncomfortable issues that have been ignored for so long, letting girls know they have the same rights and protection as any other person, regardless of their gender, ethnicity or religion.

Last week’s report on widescale sexual abuse in Rotherham has put huge strain on the South Yorkshire town. With anger directed at the Muslim community, and a growing influx of the far right, Homa Khaleeli talks to residents