Slow Swiss #3 - Round 4

Well, TALminator and I attempted to have this game on Wednesday only SOMETHING wasn't cooperating on his end and he was disconnected at least three times with the last resulting in a "WIN" via aborted game for me. That doesn't seem fair (especially since I was under the impression that I was really losing that game), so I offered to do the game over.

Let's recall. I'm a beginner and I SUCK (oh hush, y'all. It's true). I'm working on it though, trying really hard to see more things and get better and not give up. There is SO much to know though! Development, watch for safety, candidate moves, trying to decipher what the opponent is doing, calculating.... the list is almost endless, isn't it? No WONDER it's so hard for an adult who started trying to learn this at age 44 for pete's sake.

Nevertheless, I'm STUBBORN and I use the "Criss Angel" philosophy of not giving up despite my "failures" (which are not all really failures, just "tries".... I DO try to learn from them so I can't really consider them failures so much.....).

I get knocked down... but I get up again..... I took a VERY hard hit about a week ago that dang near made me quit but luckily some very dedicated and kind individuals helped me through that little crisis.

So here we are.

My goals:

1. Focus as much as possible. Feel that I am doing my absolute best given my skill level.

2. Do NOT give the opponent an easy win.

3. If in a winning position, for cripe's sake, don't blow it. (well, this one is kind of non applicable. I don't think I ever had a winning position but I think I DID get it back to fairly equal, all things considered).

SO, this is a triumph despite it being marked in the LOSS column. I really tried. I was VERY focused. As per the rules, I do NOT write my thoughts as I'm going along so I might forget why I did some things. I DO try to note my time, however, and might start to write that down as that IS allowed but I'm afraid I'll be distracted by that. **sigh** I'm easily distracted.

Funny side note: I WISH I could blame the distraction I'm going to describe on my final move but it was me not seeing something.... My daughter came into the room babbling about something and I asked her to be quiet so I could concentrate and she said, "oh, Mom! You're going to lose anyway!" NICE..... My own family certainly has confidence in me, don't they! Oh well! Unfortunately, she was RIGHT this time and as I said, I can't blame that. I seriously didn't see it coming as you will see.