3/28/2017

In these troubled times, we should take Alec Baldwin in
any form we can. His presence elevates The Boss Baby from tolerable to
enjoyable as he lends his silky gravitas to voicing a baby in a suit that wants
to undermine the world’s love of puppies. Yes, it’s all goofily ridiculous and
overly complicated, like so many children’s movies are these days. But Baldwin
provides an air of dignity that the content probably doesn’t deserve but that older
audiences forced to sit through a shocking number of scenes with nude baby
butts will appreciate.

The Boss Baby begins with 7-year-old Tim (voiced by Miles
Christopher Bakshi), the only child of parents (voiced by Jimmy Kimmel and Lisa
Kudrow) who work at the mega-popular company Puppy Co. Their careers in
marketing mean they’re often busy, but they always have time to play with Tim,
read him a bedtime story, and sing him “Blackbird” by the Beatles (an extremely
odd choice for a child’s favorite
song, given that creator Paul McCartney has said it’s inspired by the American
civil rights struggle). But all of that is upended one day when Tim’s parents
announce he’ll be getting a little brother, and don’t take his “No, thanks,”
for a suitable answer.

From the moment the baby (voiced by Alec Baldwin) arrives,
Tim and his parents are at odds. He’s convinced the baby showed up in a taxi
cab, carrying a briefcase and chatting on the phone. His parents laugh off his worry,
ascribing them to his “overactive imagination.” But as his parents spend more
and more time with the baby, Tim thinks it is trying to usurp his parents’ love,
a concern that seems validated when the nightly ritual of hugs, stories, and
songs stop.

So Tim decides to confront the baby, who admits that he’s
there to shake things up—“I’m the boss,” is a perfect thing for Baldwin to
smugly say—but who refuses to explain why. Piece by piece, his motives are
revealed: On a secret mission from Baby Corp., the world’s provider of infants,
the Boss Baby is there to discover what secret product Puppy Co. is working on.
“We’ve always been a must-have item,” the Boss Baby says of children, but the
world’s newfound obsession with puppies means that fewer babies are being
produced. If Boss Baby can spy on Tim’s parents and learn what the Puppy Co.
plan is, he’ll return to Baby Corp. a hero, and will receive a promotion into the
upper echelons of management. But if he can’t figure it out, he has to stay
with Tim’s family forever—a conclusion neither of them wants.

It’s inevitable that the two will team up, and it’s
inevitable that the head of Puppy Co., Francis E. Francis (voiced by Steve
Buscemi), will have a shady past that threatens both of the boys. But it’s
legitimately surprising that the film is so amusing. A lot of that is from
Baldwin, who delivers his lines with his trademark blend of condescension,
detachment, and self-satisfaction, but Bakshi pulls his weight, too, offering
up an ongoing sense of childhood wonder and rage. (“Are you the baby Jesus?” he
wonders of how mysteriously the Boss Baby entered their lives.) The push-pull
dynamic between the two is clearly the film’s emotional center, and they pull
it off.

The rest of this is all, as expected, pretty standard
kids’ movie stuff, with varying degrees of success. There are naked baby butts everywhere,
including some farting out baby powder; there are various gags with vomit and
kitty litter; there’s an allusion to how babies “really” get made that has the
Boss Baby disgusted when Tim volunteers his parents’ explanation. Some of it is
excellent (we experience a chase scene between Tim and the Boss Baby’s
henchmen, and then realize that our understanding was Tim’s exaggerated
perspective, when in reality the scene was far more tame), and some of it
feels lazy, like when the Boss Baby confidently says that “chicks dig babies.”
The shoddily written moments aren’t pervasive, but they’re noticeable.

Nevertheless, The Boss Baby will win you over with
Baldwin’s commitment to the absurdity. He manages to be both a calming force
and an instigating one, and in a children’s movie that could have relied solely
on expected choices, Baldwin messes with the mundane in an enjoyable, memorable
way.