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Tuesday, March 4, 2014

I just heard the headline of the day that Bill just
regained his title as the richest man in America.

Seventy-six billion and not only the richest but
also along with his spouse, Melinda, are quite the philanthropists.

Here is the official "real wealth" pecking order:

1. God

2. The Pope

3. Dysfunctional British
Royalty

4. The owner of Dubai

5. Bill Gates

6. Some other rich guys

7. Oprah

8. Gay Guys

9. Everyone else on the
planet

10. Me

When I heard the news today that Bill Gates
regained his title I was passing by a Dunkin Donuts, one of the few businesses
that causes me to irk when I see their “tip jar “for the service provided;
wrangling a jelly donut, placing it in a bag and handing the contents to me
expecting favor.

Look I am all for the “little-guy”, my heart goes
out for those who take lower wages but provide excellent
service in order to come close to a possible “living wage”. I tend to over-tip
for real service and I wonder just what those in the pecking order would leave
in a Dunkin Donuts tip jar for a jelly donut.

God-eternal
life (not too shabby) and a Mc Donald’s French fry coupon.

The Pope-The
new guy, Frankie, seems to favor the common folk so I would suspect he would
leave a shiny quarter. He doesn’t have the same power as his boss, no eternal
life, but he could give you a little blessing or a hearty handshake.

Dysfunctional
British Royalty-Tip for what? We thought jelly donuts just
appeared from the air.

The owner of Dubai-watch
closely as he may have his hand in the jar.

Bill Gates-well
he has a philanthropic streak. He would probably be very generous. I hear that he has been known to leave
thousands for a hamburger, pizza delivery and paperboys and millions for
bloggers who suck up and speak very kindly of him
(jaygerardtoday.blogspot.com).

Some other rich
guys-Nothing. “How do you think we got so rich”

Oprah-Give
the entire store-staff a car and trip to Disney world.

Gay Guys-I
am not certain they ever eat jelly donuts.

Everyone else on
the planet-look away and pretend the jar does not exist.