Welcome

At times, life can present difficulties and challenges that may feel overwhelming. Perhaps the solutions and strategies with which one managed these problems in the past are not working so well now. Psychotherapy can be a very helpful at these times. Some people seek therapy when there is a crisis in their life, and they need help and support to manage it. Other people come to therapy as a means of self-discovery and personal growth. There are probably as many reasons to come to therapy as there are people in this world, but there is almost always a shared sense of seeking to make a change that will bring greater happiness and ease to life.

The Benefits of Psychotherapy

It’s helpful to have a place to discuss one’s concerns, thoughts, and worries. I have been a therapist for over eleven years, and have helped people with a variety of problems including anxiety, depression, marital or relationship conflict, and phobias.

Targeted Treatment

When you come to therapy, you will find that the experience is tailored specifically for your needs. I make an effort to listen carefully to what is bringing you in, and then apply my skills, professional training, and experience in a transparent way to the issues you present. I believe that for psychotherapy to be most effective, it must be highly collaborative. Sometimes the benefits of simply feeling seen and heard in a particular way can be profound.

Exercise with Self- Compassion: Equanimity in Action

The other day I overheard an exercise physiologist advising someone that if they only had one good work-out experience in three visits to the gym a week, that was pretty good. “All you need is one,” he commented. That got me thinking about what the factors are that go into determining that you had a “good workout.” Certainly, the ability to fulfill a training plan would be one; another might be pushing oneself a little further than last time (adding more weight, doing more reps, spending more time on cardio, etc).

These behaviors require internalized, or intrinsic, levels of motivation; and motivation is what keeps all of us coming back to exercise even when the last time was only deemed by us to be only so-so. Evaluating that one had a good work out is also determined by how good or positive you feel about yourself afterwards. Enter: the concept of self- compassion. Self-compassion can be defined as “being kind to oneself in an instance of pain or failure; perceiving one’s experiences as part of a larger human experience and holding painful thoughts and feelings in balanced awareness (Neff, 2011).”

Studies have shown that people who apply self-compassion to themselves are better able to regulate negative emotions, and amplify positive feelings of kindness, connectedness, and presence. In other words, they are better able to interact with themselves in a state of equilibrium. I wondered “what about honing the skill of self compassion in regards to exercise?” Of course, there are no new ideas in this world, and research has already been done on this question. The preliminary findings have revealed that applying self-compassion to exercise results in a greater sense of well-being, and promotes a healthier conceptualization of the self. In short, it is a way to combat that experience of having had a “bad work-out.”

This can be done in four steps:

Stop, and become aware of your thoughts. Are you “beating up” on yourself? Is there a critical, judgmental, or negative dialog going on in your head?

Observe these thoughts and acknowledge that this is not the “truth” about you, but more what your mind gets up to.

Accept that this is your experience right now.

Re-focus, directing kindness and self-compassion your way, just as you might a friend or relative if they were going through the same thing.

So, next time you work out, consider turning your attention, and intention, to being more self-compassionate: directing kindness to yourself in this way can only increase your goal-directed drive, and result in more “good” exercise experiences!