If you are a member of a group of friends, and you are not an asshole, you will occasionally find yourself ferrying about your less-than-sober friends. You may realize that this is necessary, and good, and lowers drunk driving fatalities (all really good things!), but that doesn’t change the fact that drunk people are sometimes really freaking annoying. With that in mind, and several memorable DD-ing experiences under my belt, I bring you five ways to entertain yourself as the designated driver:

Play 90’s music on the car ride home: The mid-to-late 90’s are the period in life before people grew up and potentially quit listening to the radio as part of their “developing good taste in music” phase. As a result, everyone that you ferry home will know “Bye, Bye, Bye,” “Hit Me Baby One More Time,” and the entire Destiny’s Child Greatest Hits CD. If you play this music while they’re drunk, they’ll belt it out and–bonus points!–quit talking about whatever just happened at the party.

Try to convince your friends to recite the entire PowerThirst commercial: Will they be able to do it? No. Will their failure be hilarious? Yes. Read the rest of this entry »