“Let’s not play this game. Just write your childish Chickpea Salad Sammich post, as difficult as we’re sure it will be, and then maybe we can move on to matters that require a little more brainpower. Like, I don’t know, tying our shoes, or a game of tic-tac-toe, or I know, let’s count to ten*!”

OK, I get it. Why don’t I just put up a recipe for Peanut Butter And Jelly. But, listen.

Not everybody knows! Not EVERYBODY knows that you can mash chickpeas up, just like tuna, and it is fanfreakintabulous. You can throw it on some whole wheat bread with tomato and lettuce and it will taste like childhood, but better. Most people, yes, but not everybody knows. And so I’m here to spread the word. Not to you. Of course YOU are brilliant and you’ve known this forever and maybe you even invented it you’re so freaking smart. But this is for the lost souls in the far corners of the internet. If you don’t know, now you know.

*OMG why is the internet so mean??!

This post is part of my Homemade Mayo[1] series, where I’m highlighting a few basic recipes that call for mayo. However, you can use storebought, if you like!

Recipe Notes

~You can really dress this up or down. This is the recipe at its most basic. Add some dried seaweed for a more fishy taste. Add some chopped sunflower seeds for more bite. A curried chickpea salad? Sure! Add a tablespoon of curry powder and some red grape halves.

~You can accomplish this recipe in a food processor if you prefer it to a cutting board. First, process the chickpeas into a chunky mash. Do NOT puree. This isn’t hummus. Transfer to a bowl. Now process the carrots and celery into small pieces. Add to the bowl. Throw in everything else. Yum!