All The Things You Need To Know About Demisexuality

While you may surely know about bisexuality and maybe pansexuality, there’s a chance that you’ve not heard of Demisexuality. If you’re one of those people that haven’t heard of it, a demisexual is a person who is not sexually attracted to someone until they’ve forged an emotional connection such as a trusting friendship.

Sex Therapists believe that the typical person is going to meet someone and there is usually some degree of physical attraction that is formed within seconds. With demisexuality however, there’s no physical attraction and it is more concerned with romantic feelings, love, and friendship coming first.

Sexual desires and attraction come second and is usually not a driving force. More so, demisexuality has little bearing on the genders or orientations of the people demisexuals are attracted to.

Here are some facts about demisexuality you should know. means—and what it doesn’t.

The Origin
According to Wired, the term demisexuality first appeared on the internet in 2006 on an Asexual Visi­bility and Education Network (AVEN) forum. Researchers however believe that demisexuals have always existed, but there was no clear definition of this specific sexual identity until recently.

This makes it difficult to identify the specific time it started or an exact number of the people that identify as demisexuals. It is believed that more women than men are demisexuals but the phenomenon is also believed to be fairly uncommon.

Are Demisexuals, Gray Asexuals?
People that are demisexuals tend to refer to themselves as “gray asexuals, but experts believe that the term has many different meanings. Gray asexuals, gray ace, gray-a, or grace are people who all fall under the big umbrella of asexuals and demisexuals but all appear to have a completely different process for realizing sexual attraction.

Gray aces tend not to view sexual attraction as being attracted to someone or not being sexually attracted to anyone. They would rather create space for the idea of ‘sometimes.’

Gray space is reserved for people who don’t usually experience sexual attraction but may someday. The difference between gray asexuals and other people is that they do not feel sexual attraction enough to conform with societal or cultural norms.

Do Demisexuals Enjoy Sex?
Sex Therapists believe that demisexuals can enjoy sex, especially when they have it with people that they have been able to form an emotional attraction with beforehand.

The thing with them however is that they believe in building romantic connection prior to having any sexual interaction.

Is Demisexuality A Moral Thing?
Doesn’t seem so. Nothing as so far indicated that demisexual people have a higher moral code or ethical choices than other people as it seems like the reason for their primary attraction lies in having an emotional connection with people.

Is Demisexuality A Disease?
Surely not. Experts believe that Demisexuality should not be categorised or seen as a disease or psychological problem in any way. While it may not fit into the previously existing traditional model of human sexuality, it does not in any way indicate a pathological problem.

What society needs to do is to allow anyone that feels better labeling themselves as demisexuals live and enjoy themselves.

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