Leno: “Okay, okay. Now what made you become a Republican this time, or made you run as a Republican rather than a Libertarian?”

Paul: “Well, I’ve always been a Republican. I took a break and was in the Libertarian Party for that year, and I’ve been elected to Congress ten times as a Republican. So I’ve traditionally been a Republican.”

Well, there it is. Any Libertarians out there who think Ron Paul still considers himself a Libertarian simply need to watch this video. He’s a Republican. A socially conservative one at that. He wants nothing more to do with the Libertarian Party. Deal with it.

If you’re a Libertarian, then vote for the Libertarian. Not for Ron Paul.

We thought it was painfully obvious, with the hammer and sickle in Lady Liberty’s hand, and with a post that said the word “taint” a few dozen times, that this was a satirical blog. But we hear that some people were actually taking it seriously. If you’re one of those people who took this site seriously, go buy a helmet. You’re too retarded to be walking around without one.

No, we’re not Kucinich supporters. We’re Libertarian Party activists who are extremely loyal to our Party. In fact, the purpose of this site was to show that the only thing more ridiculous than Libertarians becoming Democrats to vote for Kucinich in the primary is Libertarians becoming Republicans to vote for Paul in the primary. Here’s why.

You know those ridiculous essays we posted about how California needs to build a wall to keep economic migrants from other states from “stealing jobs from real Californians” or about how the Second Amendment applies only to state militias and not to individuals, because the Fourteenth Amendment is “imaginary”? Well, substitute the United States for California, Mexico for Texas, and sodomy laws for gun bans, and you’ve got actual Ron Paul speeches from the House Floor. For example, the actual nutty-fringe speeches on which we based:

Our goal was to point out that so-called “Constitutionalist” arguments such as Ron Paul uses to attack immigrants and gays can also be used to attack gun rights and economic freedom. In other words, Constitutionalism does not equal Libertarianism. And it’s time that Libertarians learn this very important lesson. Ron Paul is a conservative Republican, and not a libertarian — at least no more a libertarian than Dennis Kucinich.

So, in short, if you’re a Libertarian who has seriously considered becoming a Republican so you can vote for Ron Paul, then you need a helmet, too.

FORT WORTH – As the vote tallies were announced at the Texas Republican straw poll Saturday, at least one supporter of Rep. Ron Paul of Lake Jackson couldn’t contain his frustration.

“Fix!” he yelled from the back of the ballroom at the Fort Worth Convention Center. “There’s no way.”

Ron Paul barely placed in the 5% mark in his home state! This, in a straw poll that was stuffed with every Ron Paul supporter, and which the major candidates in the race ignored. Meanwhile, he continues to poll at under 2% of the Republican primary vote nationwide.

Just this time last month, Dennis was polling at the same level that Ron Paul was — 2% in the Democratic polls (while Paul was at 2% in the Republican polls).

Despite spending millions of dollars, Ron Paul’s message has failed to win any support in the Republican Party — he remains stuck at 2% and cannot grow, or even win a straw poll in his home state!

Meanwhile, Dennis has over doubled his support in the Democratic primary with a Mainstream Libertarian message of peace, freedom and security through social justice.

Keep in mind that the Republicans don’t have any chance of winning, due to George Bush’s Taint being all over the Republicans (as my colleague Raul Pon has noted repeatedly). A Democrat will win this election.

So we can waste our money on a struggling candidate in the losing party, or we can support the most libertarian candidate in the party that will win the White House.

If Dennis continues his trend of doubling his support every month, continued momentum could make him the dominant candidate in the Democratic Party’s nomination as soon as December.

Ron Paul supporters need to get real, read the numbers, and stop their losing vanity campaign. They’re acting as naive, stubborn, and unrealistic as Libertarian Party supporters!

If we want Liberty In Our Lifetimes ™, we need to support the winning libertarian mainstream candidate with real momentum. We need someone who is getting more support in the winning party — someone with more media access, someone with more popular support among celebrities, someone young, vital and passionate.

Paul supporters should give up their pipe dream, do the responsible thing, and support Dennis Kucinich. Today. Their naive attachment to the no-hope Paul campaign will only hurt the chances of the electable Libertarian Democrat in this race.

Some of the more conservative Libertarians have contacted us to say that Dennis Kucinich is unelectable, because he waited so long to get married, which makes it look like “he’s a closet homosexual.” (Gotta love that Southern phraseology.)

Well, first of all, women who look like this don’t have to settle for being a gay man’s “beard.” He’s clearly straight, or she wouldn’t be with him.

But what if he weren’t straight? Is a gay man really unelectable nowadays? According to a recent Zogby poll, a gay man is not only electable, but even more electable than the conservative Libertarians’ favorite candidate, Ron Paul, who is 72 years old.

“58% would elect a gay person for President — about the same as for an Arab-American (57%), and more than for a person over age 70 (51%)”

Is it fair that septuagenarian candidates for President face such bias? No. But we’ve got to be ready to sacrifice principle for electability. Otherwise, we’d all just support unelectable purist Libertarians like George Phillies and Christine Smith who aren’t themselves willing to sacrifice our liberty in exchange for votes and campaign contributions.

So, as we’ve said repeatedly to our Libertarian friends, if you want to support the most electable Mainstream Libertarian candidate in 2008, it’s time to get on the Kucinich bus. It’s the only way to achieve Liberty in our Lifetimes™.

While it’s great that Ron Paul’s camp now clearly agrees that he and Dennis Kucinich are equally libertarian, the fact that they think a ticket would have Paul for President and Kucinich for Vice President shows that they still don’t quite grasp political reality. Because of George Bush’s Taint all over Paul and the rest of the Republicans, only a Democrat can be elected President next year. So the best hope for a libertarian President is Dennis Kucinich. But as Dick Cheney has shown, even a politician who actually derives his very sustenance from George Bush’s Taint can be elected Vice President, so that’s where we think Ron Paul would do the most good.

But despite the fact that the video above has the positions on the ticket reversed, we love the “crawl” at the bottom. Kudos to Ron Paul’s web campaigners. If we had as many nerdy virgins on our team as Ron Paul does, we could probably come up with something for YouTube that actually showed the ticket the way we think it ought to be. Alas, this blog is probably the most technologically advanced medium we’ll be able to muster, with everyone here so busy dating, spending quality time with their spouses and kids, and socializing with friends. There’s just no way we’ll ever catch up to the Paul campaign’s Internet supporters, which is the only group of people who spend more hours per day on the web than World of Warcraft gamers.

Dennis underscores his libertarian platform against the war, and calls for a third party revolution for libertarian ideas if he is not the Democratic candidate.

Dennis’ bravery and passion inspires me to tears. He inspires every real American, with an anti-war message that long pre-dates anti-war Johnny-Come-Lately Ron Paul.

Let’s make sure the world is safe for democracy and make Dennis the Democratic candidate for president! And if we fail, let’s make sure the Libertarian Party finally gets Dennis — a mainstream candidate with eyes that see through the lies!

While the Libertarian Party is presently hopelessly purist and exclusionary, we have an opportunity to take it back to a more inclusive time.

The LP was never meant to serve as a slave to the wealthy, corporatist interests it presently represents. These powerful interests, using their corrupt money and dirty politics, have taken the party in an extreme right direction and have ignored the Party’s history as a defender of individual liberty.

One of the most dangerous manifestations of this is the Libertarian purists’ assault on one of our most precious rights — the right to health care — and the accompanying freedom it provides. Namely, freedom from fear.

Royal libertarians have long advocated for a system of economic Darwinism that would return our nation to the worst predations of the imperial British system of years past. Our forefathers fought valiantly against this system to get us the rights that we enjoy as Americans today — public health care, free K-12 education, the school lunch program, and the Department of Housing and Urban Development.

Royal libertarians fight this tooth and nail. They have even sought to use federal power to overrule states’ rights to create single-payer health care systems as a violation of the “rights” of corporations! Yet again, the federal government overrules the will of the people to enforce the will of the corporations.

Fortunately, not all of the Libertarian Party has gone completely off the deep end. The Libertarian Reform Caucus is fighting for common sense Mainstream Libertarianism, and posting new platform ideas that remove divisive purist issues and replace them with electable issues so that Mainstream Libertarians can win elections.

We salute the fighters at the Libertarian Reform Caucus for their efforts to bring the Libertarian Party out of the anarchist miasma and into the mainstream of social democracy that represents our future. And we encourage all Libertarians for Kucinich to embrace a mainstream platform by registering as Democrats to support Dennis and, failing that, making him the Libertarian nominee for president.

L4K will also be bringing the Libertarian Party into the mainstream by encouraging the Libertarian Reform Caucus to embrace further social democratic initiatives in the future. Victory is not the best option, it’s the only hope for America!