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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

In the three years we've been in this house, I never put up my no soliciting sign. I really need this sign, because I'm a wuss and can't say no.

This afternoon I got a knock at the front door. I peeked out the window and could see the feet of a child. I assumed it was one of the boys friends, so I opened the door. It was a little boy about Carter's age with his dad. He was doing a scout project and collecting donations for the Pennies by the Inch, or our local childrens hospital.
I freeze, I feel cornered. I can't tell this boy the things I tell the lady at Walmart that asks me if I want to donate. Things like, I've paid enough money to this hospital already, or why would I pay for someone to get free health care while I pay until I'm broke because I have insurance?
Again I'm reminded at how having a medically fragile child can make your heart cold. When all you do is fight for things for your child, and pay money you don't have day after day, its tiring. When a collections agency calls because your 100 dollar copay from the hospital went unpaid, because you have so many bills to sort through, sometimes one falls through the cracks. You want to scream...what about my son?? Why can't his 100 dollar copay be covered by all your fundraising? Just once??
I took the little boy's envelope into my house and told him I'd be right back. I stood in the kitchen, staring at this envelope. I really don't have any money for this, I have two prescriptions today to pick up for my own son. And I REALLY don't want to contribute. But this little boy was doing something good, and I couldn't let him down. So as hard as it was, I wrote a check for a measly 5 dollars, because that's really all I can contribute right now. I gave the envelope back to the smiling child, and my cold hearts melts!

We've had this conversation before, and I must say that I don't blame you one bit for not wanting to contribute, but I am so proud of you for doing it anyway. You're right in saying that the little boy was just trying to do something good, and I'm sure that your donation helped his cause. Praying that when you do get to Cali, somehow and in some way you find the care that Jaxson needs. Many many prayers! <3

I don't blame you for not wanting to donate. I think it is great that you gave what you could even though it wasn't much. Every bit matters to that little boy I'm sure. And you're right, the little boy is just doing a good thing!

You did a good job! And - what's even better - caused another little man to do a good job!

I know this feeling when you seem to be run out of all finances and compassion to others. But it is so good that someone gives you a chance of seeing a bigger picture, a good lesson for a small price, a chance to serve and help others.

My comment has nothing to do with the post, but I wanted to tell you - I dreamed about Jaxson the other night, and in the dream, he wasn't hooked up to any tubes. Just a happy little boy. Looking at the pictures of your kids makes me happy.

I can totally agree with you...I feel frustrated and angry when I see people getting free health care..rx..etc., when they don't contribute to their own existence. Sounds harsh I know....but we've had to fight to get our insurance to cover routine expenses. Nothing radical or over the top.. I admire you for donating, I'm afraid that I wouldn't have..I'm angry too..can u tell? Thanks for the good example you are. Susie

I totally understand what you're saying. Kaelyn was in the PICU in June while the telethon was going on and I was definitely a little bitter....Thinking about the $100,000 + bill she was racking up and wondering how their fundraising efforts would even pay for the care of 2-3 kids there for a couple weeks. Not the most positive attitude I know, but having a child in the hospital will do that to ya I guess. I appreciate you example to the little boy though, I probably wouldn't have thought of that :)

Kids are asked not to fundraise door to door here in the NY metro area, for their own safety. There is nothing like be cornered into giving for every group out there. Even the Salvation Army puts out their pots year round! You should feel free to donate to charities on your terms. My answer? "I donated already. Thank you and good luck." Michelle M

You probably didn't have the time, but I think it would have been fine to tell this little guy that as much as you would have liked to donate, you have a medically needy child right now and just can't. Kids (even ones who are out collecting for a good cause) need to learn how to deal with disappointment - it's a part of life. - Maureen

Read about our adoption journey here!

Jaxsons story

About Me

Jaxson was born on Nov.20 2005 with Trisomy 21. He has spent half of his short life in the hospital. He has heart defects,pulmonary hypertension,severe reflux,sleep apnea, and a hypoxic brain injury that resulted in severe siezures.This is his journey.