But if you’re ready to hear the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about everything from having a threesome to warding off unwanted parenting advice, then you’re ready for your latest dose of your new favourite agony uncle, Andy.

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Dear Andy,

Me and my long-term girlfriend are keen on the idea of having a threesome. Neither of us have been involved in one before and it seems like fun.

Should we do it with a person we already know, or hook up with some random dick off the internet?

Thanks!

Kinky Dan

Hi there Kinky Dan,

Once I made the mistake of sharing my girlfriend with another man.

A close personal friend, indeed.

We were naive, feckless and four bottles of cheap red down.

Watching a somewhat racy movie at his Turnpike Lane abode, conversation naturally turned to the group’s most outrageous sexploits. Had anyone tried a threesome? No?

Woozy glances were exchanged.

Up for it? Sure, why not.

Clothes were shed. Comparative dong-length shyly assessed – mercifully both were on a par.

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Then there was urgent groping, sucked-in stomachs, and an ungainly tangle of limbs.