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Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Around 6:15 this morning I was awoken by the roosters' alarm calls, harmonizing with terrified hens clucking. I leapt from bed, grabbed some pants and a sweatshirt, sent Ulani and the cats ahead of me. Hey, I'm no fool.

Once decently attired and with duckie slippers to keep the dew from my toes, I raced to the barn. Organized chaos greeted me. While the alarms kept going off, all birds seemed to be in their places. I turned on all the lights and talked gently to help things settle down. Then all of a sudden there was a massive crescendo. I turned around and saw it, there, climbing the wall to get to the second floor, squishing itself through the space between the floorboards and the siding.

Raccoon.

Is anyone surprised? Not me. I made some loud cursing noises, threw a few things for good measure. Then I left the barn for five minute to allow things to settle a bit. And to plan my next steps.

I returned with a sharp pair of scissors. And with them, I started cutting more of my green plastic mesh fencing to staple over all the spaces between the floorboards and the siding leading to the second floor of the barn. Bang bang bang! I stapled one section, then moved junk out of the way so I could relocate the ladder for the next section. Bang bang bang!

Suddenly a loud Bang rang out behind me! "G*d d#@n sh)^t f@$X!!!" I screamed. Then I turned and saw Barnard, looking a little perplexed at my outburst. Oops. A bit trigger happy. She sat on her ledge while I bang bang banged along. Until...

She began hissing and screaming. I turned around, and saw the raccoon exiting the upstairs of the barn through the spaces between the flooring and siding on Barnard's side, right by the door into the dog yard. Apparently the raccoon was too busy looking over its left shoulder at Barnard, for it failed to see Ulani over its right shoulder until it was on the ground. When her barking began. Sending the 'coon climbing the barn right up to the soffit and back into the upstairs.

Aargh.

So I finished the west side and now I'm taking a break in case the raccoon wants to come out this side. Of course Ulani is staring at the barn. I would welcome the opportunity for her to grab that sucker and shake it until its neck snaps. But I don't think that's going to happen.

I will close up the east side spaces, then leave the chickens inside today. It will be hot in the barn -- forecast high of 80 -- so I'll try to staple mesh over the open door to deter wayward raccoons.

I don't think plastic fencing will present much of a deterent to a determined raccoon. It will thwart only hasty passage. I've heard they can bite through chicken wire but I don't know about that. They like to prowl quietly at night. The dog would certainly make that impossible.

They are the worst. I "third" the live trap. My father had an entire family ( and extended family and distant cousins) move into his attic and as fast as he has them relocated new ones arrive to take their place.

On solitude and chickens

I would rather sit on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion. -- Thoreau

There are days when solitude is a heady wine that intoxicates you with freedom, others when it is a bitter tonic, and still others when it is a poison that makes you beat your head against the wall. -- Colette

I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people: that each protects the solitude of the other. -- Rilke

As innocent as a new-laid egg. -- W. S. Gilbert

Raising children is like being pecked to death by chickens. --Anonymous, but my mother gave it to me!

Language...has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone. --Paul Johannes Tillich

Life begins when you plant a garden. -- Chinese proverb

The great omission in American life is solitude...that zone of time and space, free from the outside pressures, which is the incubator of the spirit. --Marya Mannes

If you were born lucky, even your rooster will lay eggs. -- Russian proverb

When the superficial wearies me, it wearies me so much that I need an abyss in order to rest. --Antonio Porchia

Cocks may crow, but it's the hen that lays the eggs. -- Attr. Margaret Thatcher

I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. -- Henry David Thoreau