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Vigilante

For almost a year I could boast I was Seattle’s most notorious vigilante, an identity a couple of homeless activists gave me. They’re too scared to go for a walk in Seattle’s woods with me. It’s not because I’m fearsome, it’s just that they’re afraid, not of me, but what they would find.

They don’t want to walk that mile in the other guy’s shoes. Recalcitrance is not a particularly American character trait, irony plays in matters big and small.

Now another has been branded in public as a vigilante. He’s a two-generation South Ender who admits to carrying a handgun when he walks his neighborhood. Controversy around his public stand has prompted flame mail on a local listserve – what doesn’t? – but also some jerk posted fliers in the neighborhoods about him, featuring a photo taken from another publication. The poster, however, still lacks the courage to identify him or herself.

Hot buttons surround us: the Constitution is our common reference. If any discussion proves the worth of the First Amendment, it is the Second Amendment, the right to bear arms.

When I work in the Jungle, I carry some tool I can use as a weapon. No, I’m not paranoid. I’ve been jumped by drug runners in the past, and though I resolved that situation non-violently by telling them to move on, I’d be delusional to believe that all of the people who wander Seattle’s woods are as harmless as elves and unicorns. I and other park and forest stewards in Seattle have carried machetes – Parks tells us not to, but there are times when nothing else will do for clearing invasive plants. My preferred long blade is a German sapper’s bayonet, circa 1916. It was meant to up end a Mauser, an engineer would use it to clear fields of fire.

Regular readers of this irregular column can attest I’m not a fan of Beacon Hillers buying heat and hanging with posses. There are two and only two groups of gun owners, responsible ones and idiots. Membership is pretty even in those groups.

Of fools I’ve known who’ve shot themselves, a couple stand out. One was an idiot I knew in college who shot himself with a .22 Ruger revolver while practicing his “quick” draw. He wasn’t very quick.

The other was a former Marine colonel who worked at a prestigious local law firm. He kept in his attaché case a large modern automatic, which blasted a hole in him in his office one day.

In some workplaces, yellow-livered redneck peckerwoods have sidled up to test my caliber. My answer is always the same.

“My weapon of choice is a recoilless rifle, but the government doesn’t want me to own an antitank weapon.”

No, I’m not a vigilante. Neither is the man whose picture appeared on fliers posted anonymously on Beacon Hill power poles this week.

The Second Amendment is a reality for the United States: what we make of it as citizens is what we choose. Some support it, some don’t.

Since Seattle has a professional police force, I don’t need to carry firearms. If I lived in the country again, I would own certain guns, as there is no reasoning with rabies or feral dogs.

I figure if you kill it, eat it and bear the consequences.

That includes traffic fatalities.

Most weapons I now own I found in the woods or on the street. My wife gets nervous with things I bring home: I’ve found paring, steak, folding, throwing, and filleting knives. I’m fashioning a handle for a 10-inch long skinny blade of Chinese steel, the sort of knife you likely can’t buy in China. It came to me without a handle, I’m crafting a new one from buckhorn.

Then I’ll carry it.

Am I a vigilante?

No. I’m considering a t-shirt with a large V on it, just to make hypocrites mad.

Five years ago, other fliers appeared in my neighborhood. A wannabe politico posted hundreds saying all of King County’s homeless sex offenders lived on Beacon Hill. He was an idiot.

He scared Asian American elders so they wouldn’t go out in broad daylight, so they couldn’t be the eyes and ears of the community while younger neighbors were at work. Crime escalated those rough days.

Do I know who posts provocative political flack at the expense of public safety?

Yes and no.

I’m not sure the guy who made a mess of Beacon Hill years ago really meant any harm, he was just trying to be important.

I’m not sure the person who posted this most recent flood of anonymous fliers means real harm, either.

What we make of the Second Amendment is as important as what we make of the First.

With freedom of speech comes responsibility.

Would the person who put up these latest fliers offer your own face and name?

Note: This is a seattlepi.com reader blog. It is not written or edited by the P-I. The authors are solely responsible for content. E-mail us at newmedia@seattlepi.com if you consider a post inappropriate.