Wednesday, February 25, 2009

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Family Care:Confused by Marriage to an Older Man from a Different Culture(Nalilito sa Pagkakasal sa Isang Mas Matanda at Kaibang Kultura)

Question: Rose (South Korea) Feb. 26,2009

Ano po bang gagawin? Me, I'm just confused in my life, now I'm merried with an old Korean guy. He's 50 years old, I didn't know korean culture; now (I) hear all their relatives keep asking me. Maybe it's because they feed us coz my husband has no job. Maybe it's my mistake. Sometimes, I hang out with my friends, going to disco to forget the problem, and i sleep in their house.

-----------------Answer:

Dear Rose,

It is difficult to marry someone from a culture that’s very different from your own, and it is also not easy marrying and living with someone who is much older than oneself. These are things that you appear not to have thought about and considered before marrying your husband. These difficulties will be there even if the couple deeply loves each other. I don’t know your reason for marrying your Korean husband, but if there was another reason for marrying him, then it may be very hard for you to try to make this marriage work. In addition to this, you say that he is unemployed, you did not mention whether this is a recent development or if he was already unemployed when you got married. His being unemployed puts you in a position where you have to rely on his family to care for both of you. This problem is something you have gotten yourself into because you may not have thought about things too carefully. You need to resolve this problem, and trying to forget the problem by going out to disco with your friends will only make it worst.