Why we shouldn’t conform

I used to feel guilty and although I know I had no choice but to conform as a child, I thought it may be helpful to write from my own view point, why it’s important for us to not to conform to other people’s rules and why we should learn to follow our own path more.

It stands to reason that if we live by our own rules, we will live with less stress and we’ll have more peace. We will be free to make our own choices so that we can live our own lives, but when we conform to fit our life into another person’s life, we will always live by the other person’s rules and life, which can never be our own.

When we think, and speak for ourselves, we will live with and get to use our own values and that to me is so important.

The following may act as a guide:

Break away from letting others tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. If what they’re asking of you doesn’t fit into your plans, make your own choice;

Make friends with people who like you just the way you are. From personal experience, when we try to match up to other people, it usually means we’re trying too hard to find a level of acceptance. No one should have to find a level of acceptance with anyone. We should automatically fit in;

Be comfortable around any changes you make. Change helps you grow mentally, physically and spiritually and needs to happen;

For those of you who go on to struggle with any new changes, will already be struggling. It’s not something that just happens because we choose to change.

Try not to care what other people think. When you stop caring what other people think, you stop conforming and that’s the way it should be. My own thought is that as long as we’re not rejecting other people’s rules because we feel like it, no one should make us feel bad about following our own values and doing our own thing.

Doing our own thing for our own reasons is fine. It’s our life to do as we choose and please.

I know exactly what you mean. I was the same growing up. I conformed for many years until I realised I was miserable!

I believe you can Randy. If you can put the past behind you and start making your own decisions based on what you want, you will eventually listen to yourself and will stop listening to what others want.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. From what you say here in your response, it could be that although you were a non-conformist, you also had other things to deal with which made you shy away and become more introvert.

From my own experience being a conformist and then a non-conformist, didn’t make me an introvert. My CP made me an introvert. Please let me know if that resonates with you.