Not Easy

It's not easy for me, being me
the crazy things i do and say
dealing with feelings sets me reeling
like all my bad behaviors
not to mention, surly attitude
no piece of cake, no bowl of cherries
gazing from behind my eyes
try to rise above petty
mechinizations i devise
good man, gentle , giving
is the essence of my soul
selfish, resentful and dishonest
always fight to control
can't determine who i am
what i want to be, what next i'll do
not easy, for me, being me but,
better than me trying to be you.