Here at Jezebel, we get a lot of emails. Many of them are nice, helpful emails! Quite a number, however, are totally bizarre. Below, our favorite batshit email of the week.

This week we heard from a guy who wanted to buy "WAGON WHEELS," a guy who wanted to sell "barmuda shorts" for "mens" and "womens," and a lady who wrote "I wanted to follow up with you in this unique and stylish new bag for women" (I hope someone let her out of the bag). But our favorite message this week came not via email, but on Facebook. In a Facebook comment on Cassie's "choking game" post, a reader/poet wrote,