Sam Pepper I’m Sorry

Sam Pepper I’m Sorry

[Sam Pepper:]Source: LYBIO.net
Okay. Firstly, I don’t really know how to start this video and to be honest with you I’ve always kind of been awkward when I am sitting one on one with a camera, however you like it, look very comfortable, but I’m going to do that without any cuts and I’m going to try and talk to you as if I was talking to one of my friends or someone I know, because I want to be completely honest with you now and get everything of my chest and tell you everything and make sure what I’m saying to you is 100% from my heart, it’s not acted and it’s not. Yeah, as if I’m not talking to a camera as if I’m talking to you. So, sorry if I am a little bit all over the place, just want to make sure okay everything out there.

Um… as you can see over the last few days of I have kind of disappeared from social media and I’ve never really been at a point in my life where I’ve just wanted to like completely give up and stop doing things that I love and something – you know – my job, it’s my life.

YouTube’s my life as much as how lame that sounds. YouTube’s my life.

I have never really been at that point and I shut down all my networks, I took of all my videos and was ready to give up. But I thought wow, I might as – I might as well talk to you guys first and tell you everything, and tell you everything from the beginning, and tell you how I have got to where I am now and how I got in this situation; where I ended up shutting down all of my stuff.

And explain it to you, and be honest with you for once. Like honestly sit down and talk to you and be real, and be honest, and be 100% myself because that’s not what I have been. I can really – […]

I started YouTube like six years ago and I’ve always made pranks, since day one. Even before YouTube I was very much that kind of person, I was like mischievous. I liked making people laugh, I was always like the class clown in school and I’ve always – you know, enjoyed doing that.

When I started YouTube, I started doing pranks. And there was like three channels that made pranks, there was me, there was Prank Vs. Prank, there was Edbassmaster, really they were the only kind of known prank channels out there. And I – and I did silly pranks. I just did stuff to make people laugh. I did stuff to make people smile. And just really silly harmless dumb stuff. And it was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it. And the people who are involved in the videos, they would always laugh and people would laugh watching them and was [no problems].

And before I go any further, I wanted to say something this at the beginning – this – and I’m not telling you this for any sympathy or whatever, I’m in a situation because of me. This is completely my fault. No one else’s fault. This is not for sympathy there is nothing for [us].

I just want to tell you everything honestly no, B.S. none of that. This is me to you. What ever happens from here on, what ever, it doesn’t matter. This is just for me to you.

I – I was one of the first pranksters, prank channels what ever. And then all these other prank channels, they started coming out and they’d be doing more and more and more crazy stuff.

And obviously I’ve watched these videos and because I come from doing pranks, I feel like there is no way they could be doing that. Like, you can’t do that. Like, if you do that, you are going to get in trouble; and that’s when I worked out, even back to TV, I used to watch as a kid, like all this stuff is fake. But we believe it all, but its really fake and all it was about was the end goal. You know – when someone watches it, whether they laugh, whether they’re angry, it was all to do with the reaction of the person who is watching it, more than the reaction of the persons being pranked.

So I worked out oh… okay, I can do these pranks, that these other channels are doing. And I can just fake them. I can just like, make prank videos.

Because its – its like any other industry, like anything music, art, anything, movies, everything moves with a trend. And when something happens, like clothes for example, you don’t wear clothes that are in season – you don’t wear clothes that were in fashion like three years ago. You wear current things and that is the same as my YouTube channel, I wanted to keep it current, I wanted to obviously get views, I wanted to get money like that’s what my YouTube, its my job. I make videos, so I can live. I want to keep my channel active. I want to keep it relevant. And any big YouTubers that is watching this, you know, how you constantly have that fear at the back of your head up, when am I going to go irrelevant.

When is, this video didn’t do as well as this one, this one didn’t do as, its always in your head and you always think it.

So I started making fake videos and I upload them like, you know – and some were good, some were like whatever, then this whole is like, picking up girls face, came along and I was okay like I can do that, I can make videos doing that. I did that.

[Sam Pepper:]Source: LYBIO.net
And what I wasn’t thinking this whole time is, if I have to fake a video, that means that it is too crazy for me to actually do for real. If yeah, if – if, you know – if you can’t do that in real life and you can’t do as a real prank. Then you shouldn’t be doing that as a fake prank. Because – I know I’m now, I would never kidnap someone. I would never do this. I would never do that. I know that – I know who I am as a person, but the viewers; you guys, and people who don’t normally watch me, or are watching and seeing me and are thinking ‘who is this douche’, why he is doing all this stupid stuff’ and that’s right, like. I was making myself look like a douche to everyone. And no wonder people hated me, like I’ve been an idiot, like I’ve been stupid.

Start from when it first – like all the kind of hatred towards me when I first made myself look like a massive douche was when I did the fake uh… fake ass pinch prank. Where I like made the fake arm and then I went up to girls, and I pinched their butt. Of course, I know in real life, that I can’t do that. That’s why I faked it. And I asked everyone before I did it, ‘hey, I’m doing this video. I’m going to come up to you. I’m going to ask you for directions. I’m going to pinch your butt like with my hand I have got hidden here, I’d show them, I’ll explain my YouTube channel, and I explain everything’.

And I know and they know, and no one from that – you know – that video was hurt or upset for that, but when I put that video up of course people like – ‘I’m stupid, I was stupid. And I’m an idiot’.

But people are of course are going to think I’m a douche, because I am acting like a fucking douche like, I’m acting like an idiot. I’m pinching random girls butts in the street without asking them – of – I’ve asked them okay, ‘I want you to react like this. I want you to be like super shocked and jump back’ – like I – I – all I was thinking was this video would be really like people will laugh, it is funny, but I’m not thinking, oh no – they are going to see me pinching the girls butt and think, who is this creep.

And then so then I made that video, I put that up and of course I got a like a ton of hate, and I was like I’ve never had that, its started from like the very beginning, I kind of got slung into YouTube, like I chose again; no sympathy, nothing.

I got into YouTube really young and I haven’t come from like a famous background, like I don’t have parents who are like in the industry or – you know, I’ve had not kind of management or people who have said like; this is how you do this, this is how you do that like. Again no sympathy, I’ve done everything myself.

And I – I – I did not know how to handle that hate, and I did not know how to handle that whole scenario. And my first like instinct, I’ve been making fake videos and like I’ve be faking it my whole online persona, like, this is not me, I’ll be faking every.

Why don’t I just try and twist this into something else, which was number one, the stupidest thing I could have done. I should have just came out and said ‘hey guys, I’m an idiot. I fake this video’. ‘I wanted to – I want to make content, get views and I’ve been trying to follow the trends and I’ve just messed up and I’m an idiot. And I should have not done what I am doing now’.

But instead I said like said all like, all I’m doing this social experiment like I’m – you guys know, it was bullshit. And I’ve made a bullshit story and I made a bullshit video.

And it – and just – I just made my situation worse because then everyone wanted to attack me even more. And then stories were coming out like people were saying like, Sam’s done this, Sam’s done that like. To the point that people where people were saying I raped them.

And like I feel just so stupid even talking to you about this right now. And half the reason why I haven’t talked to you like my current girlfriend, I’ve been with her like a year and a half now. It took me like four months to even build up the courage to talk to her about this like, oh by the way like people online think I’m a rapist Like he wants to say that. That’s like he messed up like just because of a stupid video I’ve made or which was stupid and again, it’s my fault.

But people have come out and said like complete bullshit about me and like of course I’m the rapist. I wouldn’t be sitting here right now today.

And I don’t want to say that. I don’t want to have to say I’m currently be like, ‘oh, hi guys, like I’m not a rapist’ like that’s messed up like who wants to say that. I don’t want to say that my girlfriend and like.

Its just shit situation to be in. I brought it on myself again, but to an extent you don’t want people just making up lies about you and all of that.

So after like that whole scenario, I was just like I’ve never felt that way before in my whole entire life.

Like I just lied on the floor and you know -my friends who were around all the time. They know the state I was in, I just lied there and I just couldn’t do anything, I couldn’t move. I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t think what to do. I was lying on the floor and I was just lied. I was completely destroyed, I thought my life is over there.

You – like you know how it is there is, this Google; there is everything like I was scared, like oh, whenever I meet new people they are going to Google me, this is what they are gonna think of me like – like I – but of course – I [brought] it all on myself, by put on that image [towards] of me, not like the real me.

[Sam Pepper:]Source: LYBIO.net
And so… then… I… so then I… kind of like pulled my shit together, I thought like, I can’t give up like, I’ve never given up in anything, my whole entire life, like I’ve lived on my own since I was 16, I’ve worked my whole entire life like I’ve never given up, no matter what situation I’ll be put in, I am never giving up and I always find a way around it.

So I start making new videos. I start making like new content it was like, a little you know, just silly, back to beginning like completely real; silly pranks just fun stuff.

And of course everyone hated me from that video and what I’ve been doing, and how I presented myself. So people were obviously were like ‘oh now Sam is back to normal’. Like that’s just – they of course people aren’t going to be like that. And so no one really liked the videos and really watched them and my channel just kind of stayed here like, no views and it’s again it’s my job like I don’t do anything else, I just do YouTube, so I am obviously worried about my rent. I’m worrying about all of this stuff and I’m still making videos, making videos and then it gets to a point where I am like okay, well. I’ve made fake videos before and they’ve done well and they’ve got like decent views. Why don’t I – why don’t I make another, you know – another video and that brings me on to making the “Best Friend Killing Prank”’. And you know exactly what I’m going to say now of course, it was fake.

And I spoke with Sam & Colby about doing the video and I said I want to do something. You know I want to do some big. We’re going to do a video together. I have this idea. I – I want to do this — like I know it’s crazy and – and I mean potentially a few people are going to be a bit mad by it. But I think it will go really viral, and get a lot of views and again like pushed towards the side that people we get mad at this like, you can’t kidnap your friends. You can’t kill your friend like.

I pushed that all to one side and instead of thinking then okay, ‘if people aren’t going to like it why would I am going to put out there’.

People are going to be even the smallest, bit, mad at me. Why would I want people thinking that about me? That’s not who I’m.

So… again I put the video up and I got a huge backlash. Again because I put in forwards the wrong image of myself. I am putting forward like a character that I have created that who doesn’t give a fuck, who will just make crazy videos, who will kidnap his friend – who will grab –

Sorry, my battery died.

And as I was saying I call the video and I put across an image of myself that I didn’t want people to see. But I’m not thinking that I’m thinking about the views and thinking about oh… I’m going to be able to bring my channel back and its stupid.

All of this — my whole thought process was stupid. I was an idiot. I put across this image and there is all these channels making videos about me and people saying stuff about me and I’m watching them like ‘wow, yeah, like’, ‘I guess like that’s – who I – that’s who I made people think – and I have fallen into that category like I can even play that character or I can give up. That was my thought process. And I never wanted to give up on the – I never wanted to sit here and had to make this video like I, this whole time… its like… you have pride and everyone has pride and I’m going to be real with you so that’s what I’m trying to do.

No one wants to admit they are wrong. No one wants to like ask for someone’s forgiveness or ask for second chance or anything like that. It’s just that’s normal human pride and I – the reason why I haven’t made this video up until now is because I don’t want to talk about these things like I pushed them to the side like, I push… I’m the type the personal that will just take a problem and okay, it doesn’t have to be a problem… I’ll push it to the side. And I’ll move on and sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn’t – and it doesn’t work with this because you guys don’t know. My friends know who I am. My friends know – all them – them videos were fake, them videos like they know that. But you guys don’t know that.

You guys that’s who you think I am and I can’t go on making videos even if I was to change my content. I can’t go on making videos unless I made this video for you guys. And to tell you like yo, this is me. This is who I’m. And I’ve messed up and I’m an idiot. I know why you think, what you think of me. And I know why you think I’m an idiot. And I know why you think I’m a douche because I’m being acting like one, I have been acting like a complete idiot online and that’s the image I put across to you and its completely understandable. But that’s why you think of me. What you think of me.

So I’ve been thinking these last few days and I know I want to do and I know what’s right to do and I want to ask you guys again like tell me – I don’t want you to feel sorry for me but I feel like stupid having to ask this but I want a second chance, like, I’m really asking you guys, like, please give me a second chance. And I’ll prove to you that I can make content that – that represents me as a person, that inspires, that makes – I would like to adventure. I would like to travel. I would like to meet new people, I like to do really cool things.

And I want to show you guys. I want to make like awesome vlogs of my life. And I want to make videos where I show you like me exploring, me going to like an abandon mall I know, going cliff diving, doing cool things like I want you guys to watch my videos and be like that’s really cool. I want to get out. I want to do that.

I want to talk you guys and give you my advice on, like – life situations, because if anyone I’ve been through like a pretty tough time these last again being mindful but being through pretty tough time this last year and a half and I know a lot of you guys like don’t have it easy. And I’ve not had it easy since beginning of my life, but I’ve always fought and I’ve want to put that across like, I want to speak to you and be honest with you, and not have to put on this stupid character and this stupid role and just try and do stuff.

And you know, cause this will go viral, cause this will get views, like if you got two million subscribers Sam and why are you only getting this many views and I’ve got to stop that. I’ve got to like, just make stuff that represents me as a person, no more pranks, no more like stupid videos.

[Sam Pepper:]Source: LYBIO.net
Only want to represent me as who I am and that’s – that’s why I have deleted every video on this channel and I’m – I am only going to put up back up the ones that represent me.

So even when this video goes up or in a day’s time, I’ll put the videos back. The ones that represent me and I know that are real and I know that are honest, and I know that come from a good heart and I made them because I love them.

At the moment, I don’t want to show people my videos, people I meet in real life they are like: ‘what you are doing’ and I am like ‘I make YouTube videos’ and they are like, ‘oh can I see one of them’ like ‘no’ like, ‘I don’t want you to see because I’m ashamed of what I’ve been doing’.

And I want to start again.

And to all themchannels out there you know, who made videos about me, [hate, hate, hate] — you know, all you guys that have liked made fun of me, you are right, like I’ve been an idiot.

And I want to change, like I want to change my conduct honestly from the depths of my heart, I want to do this as my job. But I want to do it right and I don’t want to make crap that, that makes people mad or upset anymore.

I want to make everyone smile. I want to make everyone happy. I want everyone to be positive. And I’ve got to be positive in myself. And I need to make this video.

I know there is still going to be people who will say stuff and there is still going to be people that are gonna hate but, if I said and done this and then I am making content that I believe in then at least I’ll feel a bit better myself and that’s pretty much everything [go inside].

I hope I haven’t missed anything.

And thanks very much for watching this, I know this video is really super long.

And… thank you very much for watching and honestly if you can give me a second chance, I won’t let you down.