Things GUYS Always Do in Movies and Never Do in Real Life

Oh, yes. You didn't think we'd let the men get off easy, did you? Heck no. Though I suspect that the male gender's collective pulse doesn't get too heated over being represented right in chick flicks, I think we, as lifelong fans of men, can safely say there's some stuff they just. Don't. Do.

That being said--I think my favorite part of writing this post will probably end up being you ladies hollering if your man has pulled a move straight out of Matthew McConaughey's playbook. Don't be stingy with the stories!

Without further ado... here are some things I've pretty much only seen two-dimensional men do.

Have access to their apartment building roof and a no-shame flair for twinkle-light stringing.

I mean, masks just make people uncomfortable. Nine guys out of ten choose the woman not wearing a mask every time. Because MASKS ARE WEIRD. So don't let Hilary Duff and Chad Michael Murray trip you up. It's not a good idea to wear a mask.

If I ask my husband to meet me somewhere in ten minutes, he's going to forget. If I tried to recreate this Serendipity scene, here's roughly how his response would go: Bring your what? Glove? What glove? A black glove? In a bag? On the top shelf? I don't like to mess with the top shelf. OK, OK. I'll see you at Burger King. You did say Burger King, right? Hey, I'm here, I'm getting a Whopper, what do you—the ice rink? Why there? Fine, I'm on my way. No, I didn't bring your gloves, I could only find the one.