Thursday, July 5, 2012

Day 52- Fear of Being Self-Honest within my Interactions with Others

Day 52- Fear of Being Self-Honest Within my Interactions
with Others

It is
one thing to practice self-honesty within oneself, and another to live it
outwardly within and through interactions with others. You never know how
others will take it, and this unpredictability scares me a little bit within
and as my mind. Looking at this point, I see a fear of the unknown, which is
funny because I have identified the fear of the unknown within myself without
realizing that the fear of how others will react is also the fear of the
unknown within self. For example- if there’s conflict, will I stand? Will I
remain self-honest or will I fall and compromise myself? Will I give in to
reactions, or will I remain stable? So, I’m going to have a closer look at this
fear so that I can walk within and as it and through it so that I have more of
a handle on what it is and how it works.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to fear the reactions of others to and towards me as I walk my
process towards self-honesty.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to fear whether or not I will stand up in a given situation,
within the anticipation that I may fall.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to be/become influenced by my future projections/anticipations,
instead of seeing/realizing/understanding that the only way I can and will and
am walking this point towards stability is by walking through it over and over
until I stand no matter what, which involves walking within and through
interactions with others within self-honesty in the moment, over and over and
over until I stop wavering, stop compromising myself and stop falling bck into
the mind of reactions, thoughts, feelings, emotions etc…

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to not trust myself Here in the moment..

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to not realize the investment of time that is required to
develop self-trust.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to want/need/desire self-trust as an experience of self-trust,
instead of living within and as self-trust as Who I Am in every moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to sabotage myself by going into ego within interactions with
others.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to want/need/desire to know all the answers and fix the problem
instead of taking it moment by moment and walking it through from beginning to
end.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to fear I will not stand within and as my interactions with
others because I have, for so long, placed my power within and as others,
instead of standing within and as my power as self-worth, self-acceptance,
self-love,wherein I have accepted and
allowed myself to judge and define myself based upon others.

I forgive myself for Not accepting
and allowing myself to stand as self-worth, self-acceptance and self-love, and
I see, realize and understand that in order to live myself as these things I
must stand self-honestly and express myself self-honestly and fearlessly in
each moment.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to suppress myself due to my fears of how others may react to me
if I am outwardly self-honest within and as my expression.

I forgive myself for accepting and
allowing myself to compromise myself through self-suppression because of and
due to the fear of how others mat react outwardly toward me.

I commit myself to develop myself
within and as self-trust through constantly, consistently and diligently
pushing myself to express myself fearlessly and self-honestly in each moment
until I stand no matter what.

I commit myself to stand within
and as self-acceptance and self-worth, within and through pushing myself
constantly, consistently and diligently to assert myself to and towards my
self-living, standing and breathing within and as presence and awareness and
self-honesty in each moment, thus taking myself back from all the parts of me I
have separated myself into and as.

I commit myself to walking this
process, my process as myself, towards self-realization, despite my projected
fears of what others may think.

When and as I see that I am going
into self-suppression due to fear of others outward reactions to/towards me, I
stop, and I breathe. I bring myself back into awareness by grounding myself
with and as breath, within the realization that nothing and no one can take
away who or what I am. I realize that this fear of confrontation is just a character I play, an is not who I am as Life, but rather a belief developed over time, which is ont real.

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About Me

Hi, my name is Kimberly Kline (nee Doubt). I stand for an Equal Money System- I stand for a dignified life for all beings and I will no longer accept or allow this system of human greed and self-interest that is causing suffering, starvation and abuse for the masses. Every 'solution' we have tried so far has failed- from the United Nations to the United Church. Individual self-change and leadership by example is where it's at. I humbly commit myself to this process and invite anyone who has respect for Life to join me and walk with me, beside me, as self-willed equals, until all are free from the global compromise humanity has created for itself.
Join Desteni for further discussions about world systems and humanity's place within them. Visit Desteni.org and Equalmoney.org.