August 5, 2009

This Week On Stardates Of Our Lives

You know how the first Star Trek series was just a string of adventures, and then Next Generation a little, but definitely by Deep Space Nine, the whole thing was a giant soap opera in space?

If you didn't think so before, then just read Amie's recap of the episode from the last series, Star Trek: Enterprise, where a hot alien accidentally impregnates Trip the hillbilly Scotty, and morning sickness hilarity ensues, and just tell me it doesn't sound exactly like Spaceport Charles:

Trip is still having a hard time adjusting to the alien ship, so Ah'len insists he take a nap. Apparently, that fixes everything, and Trip is good to go. He works with her to fix the engines. Apparently, also, the best the Xyrillians can do to approximate water for Trip to drink is to make these jello-like water cubes. He seems to like them. What else will this wacky ship have in store?

A holodeck! Ah'len takes Trip into a room with some trippily holographic glittery wallpaper, and it turns out this is their holodeck technology, the first of its kind witnessed by a human. Trip is very impressed. He seems to really like getting to know Ah'len. She plays a "game" with him that involves sticking your hands in a bowl of granules which allow you to read the mind of the other person.

And we all know what happens next: he gets pregnant!

Seriously, right now I feel like every minute of Star Trek I've ever watched in my life might as well have been All My Children.

I tried watching Enterprise a few times and it just disappointed me, except for the mirror universe one I caught in re-runs; the "humanity's evil achievements" opening montage alone is worth looking up the episode...

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