7 Reasons You’d Be Crazy Not To Partake In These Crazes

I don’t know if it’s that time of the century or something, but there do appear to be a lot of plonkers out there. When I was a lad I remember there being a table-tennis craze, a yo-yo craze and a Pogs craze. These days though such frivolous activity has been replaced by the need to lie flat and have someone take a photo of you. I am, of course, referring to the art (or lack of) of planking. And now I see there is a new phenomenon sweeping the world. Owling. I hardly need to explain the concept. This picture says it all.

Owling (Or as I like to call it 'pratting about')

While I find these addictions creatively unfulfilling, I can see the opportunity. That’s why I have come up with seven crazes that I anticipate will sweep the county, country, continent, world and galaxy within the next few months. All I need is for you to take one craze and spread it amongst your social circle. It would also be good if you could add the photos to our Facebook page. Right, here are the options.

1. Tarzaning. This involves the participant climbing a tree, removing their shirt and beating their chest before falling back down to earth. It should be noted that Tarzaning differs from Gorillaing in the fact that the latter is limited to those with all over body hair.

2. Frogging. This is the art of jumping over unsuspecting bystanders. The ‘froger’ should approach the ‘frogee’ from behind. Having placed their hands on the ‘frogee’s’ shoulders, the ‘froger’ should then thrust themselves up and over the ‘frogee’s’ head before running away giggling.

3. Bushing. A variation on the already established bush jumping craze, bushing differs in that it does not involve jumping. It takes a more artistic approach to positioning yourself within a bush. It’s also particularly useful if you need the toilet.

4. Stacking. This craze involves the building of a stack – using any stacking material you can find – and then sees the participant balancing on the top. The aim is to create as tall a stack as possible without it toppling over when you attempt to climb on it. It is also important to note that each stack must be made out of the same material. So, for example, you can make a stack entirely out of CD jewel cases, but you can’t make one out of CD jewel cases and DVD cases. This method is unofficially known as shafting.

5. Hatting. Particularly popular at music festivals, hatting is the art of wearing as many hats at one time as you possibly can. It should be the aim of each participant to achieve hattacular status – a level attained by someone whose combined hat height is equivalent to that of their own height. (Regretfully, midgets are excluded from hatting.).

6. Arching. This involves bending over a popular landmark. For example, the Blackpool Imitation Tower in Paris. Obviously, actually bending over the Tower of Eiffels is an impossibility which is why arching is only concerned with apparent bending. A suitable distance away from the landmark, participants bend over. With both hands and feet touching the ground the body forms an arch shape. It is then up to the photographer to capture the landmark so that it appears under your arch. (While this is a family craze it is regretful that some people use it for other means. As such please only agree to bend over for people you know.).

7. Wapping. The craziest and most potentially dangerous of the seven crazes mentioned today. Wapping involves going to Wapping. All participants are advised to change their mobile phone pin numbers before entering the area.