Proposed “Clean Sheets” Male Birth Control Pill Does What You Think it Does

Buried in Irin Carmon’s wonderful, informative Salon piece about male hormonal contraception and why there isn’t any is this odd little tidbit about the proposed “clean sheets” pill:

So far, there’s been less visible enthusiasm for the so-called clean sheets pill, which would be taken before sex for a semen-free orgasm. Lissner is enthusiastic that this could double as an HIV prevention pill for men (including men who have sex with men and aren’t worried about pregnancy). [Salon}

Whaaat? How cool would that be? The guys quoted in the piece weren’t into the idea, but I think it opens up a whole new world for guys and their boners! You could fake an orgasm! If you don’t need to wait for more semen to build up, does that mean you can easily have multiples? What happens to it and where does it go? If it’s just hanging out in your vas deferens, how do you know when you’ve come?

The idea of a jizzless male orgasm completely reframes all of the thinking around men and their orgasms. I mean, the generally accepted narrative is that for a guy, things build and build and build, then stuff shoots out and they’re done. But what if that isn’t true? What if the male orgasm is as “mysterious” as the female one? I mean, baby prevention and AIDS prevention is great, sure, and I guess keeping the sheets cleaner is a bonus sort of, but a male fluidless orgasm just tears the conventional thinking about men and pleasure wide open. Neat!

I wish we could all get some and experiment, but according to the Parsemus Foundation, which is helping to develop it, we’re still a long way away. Still, maybe Sting and those tantric people are onto something, after all.