How To Find Mr. Right Now When You Don’t Speak The Language

My favorite movie growing up was The Little Mermaid, and even now, when I’ve got a cold or I’m feeling a little homesick, I pop in the Disney musical and find myself basking in instant gratification.

But even when I was little, I was always a little weary of the Little Mermaid. It wasn’t that the singing crustacean was a bothersome stereotype or the Sea Witch horrifyingly so, it was that Ariel and Prince Eric’s relationship was built on a couple of nods and glances.

Love forever? Say what?

And it’s a well documented rebuttle for the princess story; that none of these women were ever liked for their personalities. While it’s true, after traveling to places where I can’t speak the language, I have to ask myself: how important is talking anyway?

Don’t get me wrong, when getting to know someone you want to definitely be able to talk about things, but if you’re going out for a night, or two nights, can you get away with a glance or two?

In the name of adventure I don’t stay in when I’m the odd man out, I just stick to three rules: eye contact, body language, and trusting your gut. And if you’re up for the challenge, it could be quite an eye-opener for you too.

1. He’s staring you down from across the dance floor.

Or her. Whatever gender you’re out there fishing for, eye contact seals deals. Sure, it’s nice for someone to appreciate your cute butt or your killer heels—and you definitely should be getting some of that too—but if they’re down for some fun, you should also be able to read their intention in their eyes. Plus, it’s just hot.

If you’re feeling eyes on you, or even throwing your own from across the room, it’s an instant turn-on and bonus: it doesn’t require a translation dictionary. No one stares down something they’re not thinking about getting to know, and there’s no words needed.

2. If he’s touching you, he’s into you.

And vice-versa. It’s a leap, but when you can’t have a good conversation to get things going, grab a hand and head for the disco, because body language talks for itself.

Next on the list? Brush their body, tousle their hair, touch them when you laugh; it may not seem like rocket science, but that’s because it’s not. Without words, your intimacy has to be dictated by closeness. Just make sure you read their eyes; it will tell you whether or not they’re comfortable with it.

3. Intuition is a real thing.

If it feels like it’s happening, then pull off the breaks and let it. There’s no real rule for getting something right, but in the end it’s an adventure and even if there’s the teeny, tiny obstacle of not speaking the same language, it’s a crap shoot anyway—so just enjoy the ride.

The one thing I advise you to remember is that “No” is a universal word that everyone understands, and if at any point you realize it’s your reaction to what’s going on, don’t be afraid to voice your opinion and make it known that you aren’t comfortable. You’re still you, words or not, so make sure you’re happy.

So judge Ariel as much as you like, but you’ve got to give it to her, she made happily ever after happen even after she got her voice back…haven’t you all heard of The Little Mermaid 2? It’s possible to turn something into a little bit of nothing.