Saturday, September 11, 2010

When in doubt. don't pull the trigger....

Bang Bang, Shoot Shoot. I feel like someone has taken a gun, put it to my head and pulled the trigger. I have been laying here in my own misery, contemplating the night before. Time flies when your having too much fun and there is always a consequence for every action. Hence why I am laying in bed with a missive hangover. The one that's just sitting over my shoulder snickering to it's self for doing a good jobs work, making my day a living hell. I didn't know that one person could get this sick just from having a few drinks too many. One thing I love about this life is what you learn from your experiences. I have learn a very, valuable lesson from my choices last night: Drinking dirty martinis can be like a loaded gun that you bring to a knife fight. It's always messy. So I have been wallowing in this painful state all day. Back and forth from the bathroom, hugging my porcelain prince, wishing it would have been last night I was sick instead of today. Not being able to move without wanting to vomit. Head pounding as if it's been beaten with a sledgehammer. Fever so high, my cold, wet washcloth gets warm after a minute. Ah, the joys of being in my mid 20's and wanting to rebel against the night. And so we learn. And we live. Feeling this pain only makes me feel ever more alive. It also makes me laugh. It makes me want to crawl into a hole. But it mostly makes my short life of only 24 worth every minute that passes and giving me stories to take with me as a get older with time.

"I was still interested in the youth rebellion but never-the-less I stopped being a victim. Stopped trying to attack the establishment realizing that it takes too much of your energy. " ~Vivienne Westwood