Funny poems for Mother’s Day

This Be The Verse – Philip Larkin

If your mum’s got a sense of humour – she may enjoy this rather negative portrayal of parenthood.

But make sure she knows you’re joking if you don’t want to offend her on the big day!

They f*** you up, your mum and dad.

They may not mean to, but they do.

They fill you with the faults they had

And add some extra, just for you.

But they were f***ed up in their turn

By fools in old-style hats and coats,

Who half the time were soppy-stern

And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.

It deepens like a coastal shelf.

Get out as early as you can,

And don’t have any kids yourself.

A cheap Mother’s Day gift – Unknown

Mum, I know I owe you the world
And you deserve no less
But circumstances have unfurled;
I’m in a financial mess.
For Your Mother’s Day party
I write for you this ditty.
My poetry skills are hearty
And cheap, but oh so witty!