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Sunday, September 16, 2007

Working brain cells wanted. Need many as mine have been totally fried by 7 kids, 2 paying jobs, 2 very demanding non paying job (aka Mom and Dear Honey), family that thrives on drama. If you find any of mine that I may have lost (you'll recognize them I'm sure, they will be sporting a Jack and Coke in one hand and have their thumb up in hopes of hitching a ride to someplace warm year round where there is sand, sun, and free drinks :D....and no kids), please scoop them up and send me a comment as to where they were found and where to pick them up. On the other hand, just shoot the lil jerks for abandoning me when I need them LOL.

All kidding aside, if I make it thru my childrens childhood with any of my neurotic pathways still intact it will be a small miracle. I always knew being a Mom wasn't gonna be easy but geez criminy, never knew it was gonna be like this. I know I drove my Mom to the brink of insanity more than a few times, but even with the "your kids will be 7 times worse than you" curse over my head, I never imagined this. I was ornery (ya go figure huh :D) but OMG this surpasses anything I imagined my "payback" to be.

A tomboy at heart, I never got too much into the typical girl stuff that most girls do. Make-up, ya i wore it, but only because I found it much easier to hook up with guys that I wanted when I wore it. (Don't even say what your thinking LOL). Skirts were well pretty much the same thing.....with the added bonus of I looked better in them than most of my competition when vying for the guy I wanted. Hairspray.......ahhhhh now there is a multi purpose item. First use... the empty pump bottle...wash out well, and used to transport alcholic beverages to places that they were banned aka school field trips, prom, dances, you get the picture I suppose. Second use aerosol cans...combined with a lighter made a really great flame thrower that sure impressed the guys. Last but not least, to actually use on your hair (how dull huh?) Oh forgot another use, after finishing a charcoal drawing or pencil drawing, spray it with hairspray so it wouldn't smudge on the way to my drawing class. Ok enough of hairspray, on to other girly items now. Nair :D, now there is a fun one....many guys that were asses to me and/or my friends would find himself without an eyebrow (or maybe two), various other uses including words Naired into their leg hair or chest hair or back hair as a minor punishment for being a jerk :D. Lipstick HAHA, hated wearing it, but it was great to "decorate" things with :D. Not a complete list, but you get the idea.

Keeping that in mind, comprehend this........6 kids total (NO not all of them are biologically mine, if they were well I'd be in a nuthouse someplace pulling my ear, my "blankie" tucked under my arm, and sucking my thumb while sitting indian style on the floor of my padded room rocking back and forth). Of those how many boys do you think we have been blessed with? TWO!!!!Meaning the remaining FOUR are girls! OMG.......and all but possibly 1 of those are girly girls! ( The 4 yr old, there is still hope for her :D) I am lost in a daze of cheerleader lala land. Estrogen seeps from every nook and cranny of our house. It's awful! Being of the t-shirt and jeans fashion club, I feel like the deer in the crosshairs when confronted with "Do these shoes match this outfit?" or "Ewwwww there is a spider" "Ewwwww you squashed it with your shoe....and you're gonna wear it now!" Oh another thing, if I hear IDK (yes said just like that) one more time, I swear I'm gonna......... well swear. Tis enuf to drive a crazy person sane!

Now I know everyone is under this misconception that boys are the hardest to raise. NOOOOOO NOOOOOOO NOOOOOOO.......you try living with a houseful of girls when your not one of "them" (aka girly girl). I dare ya, no I quadruple dare ya on that one. Gimmie the boys anyday!