Having written for this site for a while, I recognize that I use some phrases more often than I’d probably like to, but I’m pretty sure I’ve never referred to something as "slapstick religious splatter" or "the greatest fucking short film that will ever exist." And that’s because we’ve never talked about the superb comedic gorefest Fist of Jesus, a 2012 short created by Spanish co-directors Adrián Cardona and screenwriter David Muñoz, which is currently in the midst of a Kickstarter campaign to become a full-length feature.

This is like Monty Python’s Bad Taste, and I have never felt more strongly about a movie needing to get made in my life. I didn’t want to post the short before letting everyone know this flick deals with Jesus raising a zombie Lazarus from the dead, and contains the most viscerally amusing practical effects you’ll ever see on film, at least until a full movie palms your eyeballs out once it gets funded. Get it funded. Watch Fist of Jesus.

Wasn’t that a spectacle you’d preach about from a mountain? Once Upon a Time in Jerusalem is currently nearing $26,000 on its way to a $150,000 goal that it had better reach. The goal for the feature is to forego all CGI and use only real costumes, effects and goresplosions, all while expanding upon the core story of Jesus having to take on every kind of antagonist imaginable, leading to a body count nearing the action spoof Hot Shots Part Deux. Below you can see concept scenes that will be recreated to greater effect should it all come together, telling the darkly comedy story of Jesus heading out on a dangerous journey with twelve mercenaries, based on the predication of the Oracle of Delphos. Preach the word to your friends.