We were told ahead of time that "colorful events will take place" for Dear Leader Kim Jong-il's birthday on Wednesday, but we could have never guessed just how awe inspiring the celebration of his 69th year of life would be. According to the Korean Central News Agency, a "mysterious natural wonder" took place above Kim's magical mountain birthplace, Mount Paektu:

North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il turns 69 today—that is, it is the 69th anniversary of his…
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"The bright sun rose up, throwing its brilliant rays and the area of the Paektusan Secret Camp turned into a fascinating picturesque of spring. Then rarely big and bright halo persisted in the sky above Jong Il Peak for an hour, starting at 09:30."

We can all just shut up now about Kim's rumored kidney troubles and alleged strokes — he was brought to us from the heavens and will never leave.