Do you need help now?

Be the One to talk

If you are worried that someone is going to kill themself, it can feel hard to talk about.

But YOU could be the person who makes a difference:

If you see someone in distress and something doesn’t seem right, ask them if they are okay. It might just start a conversation that will stop them killing themselves.

If you’re worried about a friend, work colleague or family member, talk to them. Have an open conversation; don’t be afraid to say what you’re thinking. “I’m worried you’re going to kill yourself. Please will you talk to me about how you’re feeling?”

Be the One to listen

You don’t have to be an expert. You just have to listen.

Talking can help people to work through their problems. It can make them feel less alone. It can encourage them to seek professional help. Most importantly, it makes them feel listened to – and that can save lives.

Be patient – it might take a few attempts at getting them to talk before they open up.

Don’t judge – allow them to speak openly without fear of being criticised.

Say things like ‘tell me more’ to keep the conversation going.

Be the One to care

Nobody knows exactly what other people are going through in life. Everybody has lows and bad times and everybody responds to them differently. If we all resolve to care more about other people we can help make the world an easier place for people who are struggling with mental health problems.

Be the one to take action if you’re worried about someone killing themselves.

How to recognise that someone you know may be thinking about suicide

It can be very hard to tell if someone is thinking about suicide, especially as they will often do everything they can to hide the true situation from family and friends.

Looking out for some of the signs below may help.

Changes in the way they are behaving

Such as:

Significant change in mood – do they seem more anxious, agitated, depressed, quiet?

Significant changes in appearance, personal hygiene, weight loss

Loss of interest in things they previously enjoyed doing – perhaps they don’t want to see family or friends or have lost interest in hobbies

Increased alcohol/drug use

Things they are saying

This could be things they say in person or online.

‘I can’t sleep’

‘I don’t want to wake up’

‘I feel hopeless’

‘There’s no point in going on’

‘Nothing matters anymore’

‘All of my problems will end soon’

‘No one can do anything to help me now’

‘I wish I was dead’

Recent trauma or stressful event

Has the person experienced a bereavement, the loss of a partner, breakdown of a relationship, redundancy, diagnosis of health problems?

Making preparations

This might include:

Giving away possessions

Looking for means to hurt or kill themselves such as hoarding tablets

Someone to look after their pets

Saying goodbye

How to talk to someone you don’t know who may be at risk of suicide

How do I tell if someone is thinking about killing themselves?

There are no hard and fast rules, but some signs that someone may be at risk could be standing alone or in an isolated spot, particularly at the train station, near woodland or on a bridge or looking distant, withdrawn or upset.

You won’t do any harm by speaking to them so go with your instincts if you feel something isn’t quite right.

What should I do to help them?

Try to start a conversation. You could simply ask “Are you okay?” or “Is everything alright?” If you’re at the train station you could ask them which train they’re getting. Or talk about the weather. Introduce yourself. Simply interrupting their thoughts might be enough to encourage them to get help.

If someone is in immediate danger you should dial 999. Don’t do anything to put yourself at risk of injury.

How do I talk about suicide?

There is no special language. Don’t be afraid to use terms such as ‘suicide’ and ‘killing yourself’. There is no evidence that this will make someone more likely to kill themselves.

Speak openly, ask direct questions and encourage them to get help and support. Being listened to will make them feel less alone.

What if I say the wrong thing?

Don’t worry about saying the wrong thing. What’s important is letting someone open up about what they are going through.

Be patient. Don’t be judgmental about what they tell you.

You don’t need to offer advice yourself but could make sure they know about services that can help.

Should I call 999?

If you feel you can’t deal with the situation dial 999 and ask for the police. If you are busy talking to the person involved, see if you can get a passer-by to call for you.

Always dial 999 if the person is at immediate risk of injury or harm. Do not put yourself in any danger.

Should I tell someone?

You don’t need to manage on your own. Depending on where you are, you could get the attention of a member of staff or ask a passer-by to alert somebody or call the police. Ask the person if there’s someone you can call for them.

Talking to somebody who is feeling suicidal could save their life, but remember to look after yourself too. You might be left feeling upset or distressed afterwards and it’s important that you have someone to support you.