If you ever get that urge to fart (flatulate), but you're in public, then read this and perhaps it will help you out when that special moment comes around.

Steps

Method1

In the Classroom

1

Try to get up and go to the pencil sharpener, and while you are sharpening your pencil loudly, try to fart as silently as you can. As soon as you flatulate, be sure to walk away fast because you don't want the fumes to get stuck to your clothes. But also make sure that the smell doesn't follow you.

2

Always get a seat with a "puffy" soft surface. Not like a wood chair but like your couch. Being in seats like that will reduce a lot the risk of a sounding fart. If you can't get a seat like that, sit on your sweater or jacket.

3

Put your weight on one of your buttocks and lean in the same direction as your buttock (ex. put your weight on your right buttock and lean to the right). This separates your buttocks and makes your fart silent. You could also drop your pencil on the floor and reach for it so you don't look weird leaning to the left or right in your chair. CAUTION: The smell will go to the opposite direction you are leaning in, so aim your gasses to an empty area.

4

Ask to use the restroom. The teacher may say yes, and then you can do it in the bathroom!

5

Drop a textbook or another heavy object to generate a loud noise. Release your fart precisely as the object makes contact with the floor, as this will effectively cancel out the noise. (Warning: Be sure to time your release exactly right. If you fart too soon, the noise will still be heard. If you fart after the book is dropped, the book will draw attention to you and your fart will be noticed by more people.

6

Purchase a noise cancellation device, and arrange it in a comfortable position between the crack on your bottom and the seat of your trousers. Make sure that it has a noise sensor, that is activated by the occurrence of a sound. It should be able to effectively cover up any noise released from your fart. (Note: does not necessarily account for the odor, so be cautious. In addition, practice several times at home before using it at school, in case something goes wrong).

Method2

While Hanging Out

1

Pretend you need to step out for a minute, and fart somewhere where no one is. If your friends are really spirited, then you can probably fart in front of them and they won't really care.

Method3

While Taking a Test

1

Try to flatulate (fart) as gently as possible.

An alternative strategy is to fart loud and be proud, because your classmates will thank you for the disruption.

Method4

On a Roller coaster

1

Wait for the drop where everyone is screaming. While everyone is loudly screaming, you may rip a tasty one. Also, no one will smell this because you are moving so fast.

Method5

On an elevator

1

Get your timing right. Timing is critical in this situation.

2

Be sure to emit only small bursts as floors are reached and the electronic indicator emits the beeping noise. You may also be able to make use of the time during which the doors are opening and closing, depending on the condition of the elevator and how loud this function may be.

3

Be sure to show subtle signs of disgust as if the people who have entered the elevator are those who are emitting a foul smell. This is only if you can smell your fart, however.

4

If all else fails, get out of the elevator and take the stairs.

Method6

While Shopping

1

Go to an empty aisle and let it rip, then get out of there as fast as you can.

2

If you are near people, lean over as if you are going to grab an item on a lower shelf, let it rip, and then blame the nearest person.

Method7

In a Vehicle

1

If you can't help it, and are sitting in a moving vehicle, try open the window before you fart. This way the smell should go out the window quickly and nobody will notice the fart.

Method8

While Eating lunch

1

Get your table to laugh loudly or wait until everyone does start laughing while you secretly let one rip.

2

Try to get everyone to start a clapping contest to see who can clap loudest.

Method9

In The Pool

1

If you have to flatulate in the pool, get out of the pool and into the bathrooms/change rooms.

2

Splash to hide those rising bubbles. This is for if you fart in the pool.

3

Dive to the bottom (or close to the bottom) of the deep end and then swim away before the bubbles reach the surface. If they reach the surface, people think it is you breathing out.

4

Quickly head to the Jacuzzi. Here you can fart unnoticed because of the bubbles that are already there.

5

Jump in the pool, and as soon as you're in the water, fart! All the bubbles surrounding you will cover it up. Also, nobody can smell your fart underwater!

Method10

In the Library

1

Get into a book aisle that is not occupied by anybody. If you can do that, people are less likely to notice.

2

In a situation in which there are people everywhere, try to secretly release bits of your toxins as you walk on by.

3

Walk by the librarian's desk and release, if you're heard, point towards the person behind the desk. They'll look clueless, which may save you from a terrible embarrassment.

4

Lock yourself in a bathroom stall to relieve yourself.

Method11

During P.E.

1

Wait until you start running to flatulate. As you run, release small bursts of your toxins. If your fart is loud, pretend that you aren't the one who farted.

2

During a sport, run to where no one is occupying and let it rip. Pray it's a silent one.

Method12

At A Sleepover

1

While talking, raise your voice as if to emphasize a point. While your voice is raised, release your gas. If this action causes a smell, quickly be the one to ask, "Who farted?"

2

Wait until everyone is laughing hard, and let it rip. Either your fart won't be noticeable, or the fart will cause more laughter.

3

If you can do an armpit fart, walk as far from the group as possible, saying, "I need to fart," as if you're about to do something incredible. Don't turn your back to them. Still in plain sight, do a fake armpit fart (where no noise comes out), and fart at the same time. If it's a silent fart, pretend to have failed at the armpit fart and walk back, saying "Dang, it didn't work." If it sounds too realistic, laugh and say, "I bet you can't do one as good as that!" You may initiate a full-on armpit fart contest!

4

You can play a prank with a fart: You feel the need to fart but you withhold it. Then go to someone at the sleepover ( please choose wisely )wear a sad or strained expression on your face and walk up to him/ her.Stop and slowly extend your arm with your forefinger pointing at the victim,and with a pitiful voice say: ' Please, hold my finger for a while' or whatever you might think convincing.The victim is suspicious and reluctantly holds your finger looking at you in the eye. With a perfect sense of timing you let out a sonorous big fart. The victim is so startled the he/she even jumps back and hollers...everybody split their sides with laughter... and even the victim may join in.

5

While in bed to sleep, try to silently fart without being detected. If the person whose house you're staying over at has a dog, make sure the dog is by you. You can quickly blame it on the poor, unsuspecting animal. If the person doesn't have a dog, try to hold it until everyone is asleep or quietly excuse yourself to the bathroom.

Read the room. If your friends think your gas will be funny, let it rip, and take credit for it. If your friends will think it is gross, hold it in as much as you can, or go to the bathroom to pass gas.

Without telling this to anyone, get up, go secretly to washroom and wash your pants and remove the poop before it starts spilling. Be sure it does not get on to your outer wear, otherwise you have to change it and someone will know and it will leave a bad impression.

How should I handle it if I pass gas and my friend is embarrassed by the sound?

wikiHow Contributor

Just laugh it off. After all, your friend is not the one who let one go. Next time, excuse yourself and run to the bathroom or outside before it slips out. Tell your friend it happens to the best of us.

If this question (or a similar one) is answered twice in this section, please click here to let us know.

Tips

If you fart when you are sitting down, make sure to lean back in your seat. If you hunch over, it will make a loud snapping noise that everyone in the immediate area will hear, and everyone will know where it came from.

People will be rude and make fun, but everybody does it!

Relax... Tensing up is what makes a lot of farts come out ugly. Take a deep breath and wait for it. You should know when the time is right.

Another tip is if you need to fart, try to do something that makes a lot of noise and fart while you are doing that.

If you are next to a group of people that are talking loudly and don't seem to be paying any attention to you, then feel free to flatulate, but make sure you leave the area soon afterwards or else people will get suspicious.

Sometimes if you hold it in, and you flatulate a bit later, it might become silent.

A vibration can occur if ones buttocks are pressed too firmly against a hard unyielding surface and the particles will often reverberate off it leaving a pleasurable sensation for the person who is farting but a not so pleasurable noise and sound.

Always make sure that whenever you flatulate, you let them out long and silently.

Go with it! If you are about to let one rip, and you can tell it's going to be loud, you can't control it, and there's nowhere to go, try to push it out as loudly as possible, and laugh while you do it. Then, everyone will be laughing with you, not at you.

Well sitting on a seat you can rock from side to side lifting your buttocks up one she get a time and then pressing them down against the seat so that its spread them apart. Then with your full thoroughly exposed push in short increments until you feel the fire right on the edge of the rim. Once you have the entire fired right at the edge of the whole push very carefully for a long time and it will release with nothing but a sound of quiet air.

Warnings

Never force a fart if you're sitting at a school desk. The sound will not only echo off the seat, but it will resonate throughout the storage area beneath the seat, like that of a bass drum, ensuring that everyone in the room will hear it.

The worst type of flatulence you can do is when you are sitting on a chair and let out a fart really fast. It WILL be loud and disgusting, and people WILL laugh at you. ALWAYS make sure you do your releasing of gas as silently and as long as you can.

Once in a great while you will flatulate and you can't control it. Just hope its not a noticeable one.

If you are going to flatulate, and you KNOW you're going to blame someone, don't blame your pets, because others will just be disgusted.