HO! HO! HO! Holiday Hell....so far.

This is a very stressful time of year for everyone over the age of 16 or so, as gift giving, shopping, more constant family interaction and DRIVING are major stress factors...and stress is bad...and holiday stress is uber bad.

So... i will describe my holiday adventures...so far.

First off i live in Manhasset Long Island, for those of you who know about Long Island and Manhasset you understand some of my pain, frustration and anger. If you dont know about where i come from...lets just say if you not a socialite or at least drive a 7 series bmw most people treat you like shit. I am proud to be a long haired, pot smoking ,beetle(old beetle) driving , caring person who always put others ahead of myself, unlike 99% of the dicks here.

I am lucky enough to have some money to throw around, and my parents did make some good decisions for me early in life which paid off…so I feel it is my obligation to buy everyone in my family gifts.

So now off to the gifts….
I got fucked, on the first day of shopping. I go online at a boutique store to buy my mom a designer wallet. My moms nickname is the “Prada Whore” shes a 56 year old woman who dresses like a 18 year old trendy college girl. Whatever, a prada addiction is better than cigarettes I guess.
So I go online thinking ill save some money cause that shit is expensive, and I find a web site with good feedback which promises authentic designer merchandise at 20-70% off. (I will not list anyweb sites) I find the wallet I want for her and its only $109! At the Prada retail store its $350. SO I buy the wallet….well it came the other day and its FAKE AS SHIT! A really good fake but nevertheless it is not a genuine prada billfold m170 nylon wallet. I got sucked into the “it too good to be true” thing I guess. I will try to return it. And I really know my parda, Gucci Tiff’s, Dior, ect…no fake can really fake me once I hold it.
The next night I go to my local mall and buy my dad a coffee maker peculator thing, it WAS about $60. I was driving my old 1984 Volkswagen rabbit…so I walk to my car and saw what appeared to be a huge puddle of liquid under my car and dripping down the parking lot. SHIT….not good. I put the new coffee pot on the roof unlock the door and pop the hood……I discover I ran over a huge cup of soda and gave the appearance that I blew my car up….good car was FINE. SO I SLAM THE HOOD AND THE NEW COFFEE THING TOPPLES OFF THE ROOF AND SMASHES TO SHIT ON THE GROUND. Well now it’s a $120 coffee thing. I had to get another one.

Since it was a very nice day today and I woke up without a hangover, I decided to take my classic 1947 vw bug to a drive to the Manhasset mall. Now my 1947 bug is nearly restored to original specs, it only has about 30 horse power it is very slow.

Long story short I had at least 4 Mercedes driving pricks tailgating me all the way there….and it’s a 2 lane road the whole way…cant you GO AROUND?
The speed limit is 30-40mph here and that all I do…mostly because that’s all the car can do…and there is stop lights every 20 feet…so its not like your are really gonna go anywhere flooring the shit out of you $100,000 car, cept hi another 10 minute light.

So I get to the Miracle mile mall buy the real deal prada wallet for my mom which cost about $400 after taxes. So now the wallet cost me over $500 because I got duped with the fake. I spend way too much money by the end of the day, which is my fault but I got all my shopping done.

Oh yeah on the way home I got a flat tire….the tire somehow got a hole in it on the sidewall and now I need a new tire which is about $200.

Now its 539am and I think I need to do some last minute shit, and im gonna stay up all day and just get it done.

So all this crap along with the “usual” stress factors…really take the magic outta the holidays.

And the thing that really pisses me off is that I spend so many sleepless nights shopping and researching stuff on the net to buy my fam and friends…which is a lot of work!…and what DO I get as gifts…usually cash…..geeeeeeee…you got me cash how thoughtful. So this year I told everyone…if your gonna give me cash don’t bother giving me anything at all! Put some FUCKING THOUGHT INTO IT PEOPLE!

In the end I really don’t care….i just want x-mas to come fast and go…..

Hope some of you can relate to this…and laugh about it as I am doing now…but I just wanted to share my vent with you!