Actually I feel sorry for those poor misguided souls that have no interest in reading. They are more to be pitied than to be scorned I think, though I do wonder if it is necessary to take up a collection for them or not. How can such things be in the early 21st Century? Poor guy doesn't know what he's missing by not being a reader.

Actually I feel sorry for those poor misguided souls that have no interest in reading. They are more to be pitied than to be scorned I think, though I do wonder if it is necessary to take up a collection for them or not. How can such things be in the early 21st Century? Poor guy doesn't know what he's missing by not being a reader.

Different people have different interests. Many of my friends spend all their free time watching TV. Am I to be "pitied" because I prefer to read instead? It's simply a different interest. I think there's a little "intellectual snobbery" in the view that reading is somehow a "superior" hobby to other forms of entertainment. If you enjoy doing something, that's what matters.

My husband doesn't read. I think he read his first "for fun" book after we'd been married a few years, and I teased him when he started bringing home his own books. (He discovered the first in a series one day when he was out without me and only bought the five that were in that series. As far as I know, he hasn't read or purchased any other books since, although I suspect he occasionally reads on the Kindle app on his phone.)

I've never known anyone that reads as much as I do, so I'm used to it being a solitary hobby for me. I find it more important that he accepts that I read and buy books rather than whether or not he reads. We have other interests and activities that we share; reading is just not one of them.

Likewise, I don't judge people because they read or don't read. I have other first impression prejudices.

Different people have different interests. Many of my friends spend all their free time watching TV. Am I to be "pitied" because I prefer to read instead? It's simply a different interest. I think there's a little "intellectual snobbery" in the view that reading is somehow a "superior" hobby to other forms of entertainment. If you enjoy doing something, that's what matters.

True, and I didn't mean it to be taken literally. I was just having a little joke based on the subject.

I wouldn't date someone who didn't read. I find it creepy to be in a house without books. I don't consider reading to be a mere hobby, I consider literacy to be a core value, that a potential mate would have to share. Others are free to set different standards. There are, of course, intelligent people who do not read, but in general, I find non-readers difficult to communicate with. I'd no sooner date someone who didn't read than I would date someone who spent all their time on the couch.

Reading isn't fine wine, expensive sports cars or exotic vacations. Reading is available to anyone, at little or no cost, thus, I don't see my position as elitist. In any case, I get to select my own standards. I'm not going to harrass people for not reading, but that doesn't mean I need to be their buddies. There is plenty of sneering at readers, consider how the media represents the "bookworm". I've had people who, when they see me reading a book, think it is appropriate to inform me that "real men don't read."

My girlfriend at the time and I were living together. We did have a lot in common. Reading was not one of them.
We were sitting in the living room and she turned on the TV. I pulled out my book and started reading. She got mad because she expected me to sit and stare at the boob tube with her. We did not stay together long after that.
Apache

When looking at potential marriage material, yes a lack of books would be a big problem. (and I have mentioned this before, but my now-husband actually tricked me in this way! When I first went to his apartment, he had TONS of books, literary and otherwise. It turns out, he has finished hardly any of them. Ha ha.)

HOWEVER, it doesn't sound like you were looking for marriage-material in your rendezvous. I can't say that a lack of books would bother me, in that case? Maybe you have higher standards than me.

eP

Agreed. A romp would have been acceptabe.

Dated a fellow long-term, and one of the things that most impressed me was all of the book cases stuffed to the nuts. I should have made that quick exit, when months later he admitted they belonged to his room mate.

I could never date, much less marry, someone who didn't read. When my husband and I were courting, I made an obscure Alice in Wonderland reference; the next time we were together he'd not only read the book again, he came back with the next line. We joke that we didn't so much get married as we merged libraries.

I don't watch tv or movies much, don't like sports (do like cats) and I don't know what I'd talk about to someone who didn't read.

Have any of you guys ever dated readers who were simply too full of themselves? i mean, that because they were readers they considered themselves as intellectuals and better than everyone else...?

Yes. Such an incredible turn off. I constantly felt like he was competing with me - he would try to "one-up" anything I said with regards to books or education. Needless to day, we did not date for long.

Quote:

Originally Posted by LovesMacs

I think the real turn-off would be someone who scorns reading for pleasure.

I agree!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Apache

My girlfriend at the time and I were living together. We did have a lot in common. Reading was not one of them.
We were sitting in the living room and she turned on the TV. I pulled out my book and started reading. She got mad because she expected me to sit and stare at the boob tube with her. We did not stay together long after that.
Apache

My husband was not a reader when we first started dating. The fact that he would not bother me while I was reading and he was watching TV (someone watching TV in the same room as me while I'm reading doesn't bother me all that much. I find music much more distracting for some reason) was VERY endearing - if he had expected me to sit and stare at the TV with him our relationship would not endured!

Seeing how much I enjoyed reading got him interested in reading, and he is actually now an avid reader. We often read the same books and discuss them later. I have even managed to turn him on to ebooks, and he is even more devoted to them than I am! He complains loudly when I recommend a book to him that is not available as an ebook. If I were to date now it would take a lot for me to overlook the fact that the person I was dating was not into reading. Perhaps I sensed all along that my husband had a reader hiding inside him! (Or maybe he really was/is just THAT good looking! )

There is plenty of sneering at readers, consider how the media represents the "bookworm". I've had people who, when they see me reading a book, think it is appropriate to inform me that "real men don't read."

yup, we're supposed to put the books down and sit rocking back&forth and drooling over sports and boobs while our women remind us to breathe, just like the half-wit dummies the media loves portraying us as.