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Aug 2, 2007

I've been reading over at Mocha Momma. She is a fabulous writer and I stop by on a regular basis for a refill of her wit and candor. Most recently she has been discussing racism. Go read. It's good stuff.

I am always flummoxed by this discussion and topic.

As a white woman, brought up in a blue collar family, in a mostly white suburb of San Francisco, by parents who are now entering their 70's, I was exposed to racism. I can, in fact, recall dinner conversations where the "N word" was used. My grandfather was insistent that the "Asiatics" (that's Asians) were taking over the world or at least San Francisco. Equal Opportunity threatened to take my father's job away from him- or at least that's how it was discussed at dinner.

I can remember using racial slurs in grammar school and making fun of the dyke's who lived down the street. Never to any one's face, but I had a circle of friends where this was acceptable or at least tolerated with each other. One of my friends was from the Philippines. I wonder now what he remembers about that time, what he thinks.

Today, I like to think of myself as not racist. I know I don't use derogatory terms other than dyke, but that's generally a word I use to describe myself or perhaps others of my ilk. (Which is another whole subject... along the lines of is it okay for black people to use the "N word"). I don't behave in any kind of racist manner. But, I think the reality is I am racist. I am a product of how I was raised. The kicker is, I also think EVERYONE is racist.

Each of is brought up differently. Religion, Race, Politics, Money, Work Ethic, Speech, Manners, Food, Music, Speech, Sexuality, Education, the list really is endless. If we tried harder to respect one another, tried a little bit of humanity, and dignity... (thanks for those words Mocha) There is so much I don't know, maybe if I said that, openly, clearly, respectfully, I could learn. We could learn. There really is way more to someone than their skin color.

A few years back I was fortunate to see Ave Q on Broadway. I think they covered it well... A bit of a humorous approach- obviously.

Kate Monster:Well, it's a touchy subject.No, not all Monsters are related.What are you trying say, huh?That we all look the same to you?Huh, huh, huh?

Princeton:No, no, no, not at all. I'm sorry,I guess that was a little racist.

Kate Monster:I should say so. You should be much morecareful when you're talking about thesensitive subject of race.

Princeton:Well, look who's talking!

Kate Monster:What do you mean?

Princeton:What about that special Monster School you told me about?

Kate Monster:What about it?

Princeton:Could someone like me go there?

Kate Monster:No, we don't want people like you-

Princeton:You see?!

You're a little bit racist.

Kate Monster:Well, you're a little bit too.

Princeton:I guess we're both a little bit racist.

Kate Monster:Admitting it is not an easy thing to do...

Princeton:But I guess it's true.

Kate Monster:Between me and you,I think

Both:Everyone's a little bit racistSometimes.Doesn't mean we goAround committing hate crimes.Look around and you will findNo one's really color blind.Maybe it's a factWe all should faceEveryone makes judgmentsBased on race.

Princeton:Now not big judgments, like who to hireor who to buy a newspaper from -

Kate Monster:No!

Princeton:No, just little judgments like thinking that Mexicanbusboys should learn to speak goddamn English!

Kate Monster:Right!

Both:Everyone's a little bit racistToday.So, everyone's a little bit racistOkay!Ethinic jokes might be uncouth,But you laugh becauseThey're based on truth.Don't take them asPersonal attacks.Everyone enjoys them -So relax!

Princeton:All right, stop me if you've heard this one.

Kate Monster:Okay!

Princeton:There's a plan going down and there's onlyone paracute. And there's a rabbi, a priest...

Christmas Eve:Yes, I know.The Jews have allThe moneyAnd the whites have allThe power.And I'm always in taxi-cabWith driver who no shower!

Princeton:Me too!

Kate Monster:Me too!

Gary Coleman:I can't even get a taxi!

All:Everyone's a little bit racistIt's true.But everyone is just aboutAs racist as you!If we all could just admitThat we are racist a little bit,And everyone stopped beingSo PCMaybe we could live in -Harmony!

Those lyrics sound like they're for a really good play. And I agree, we are all racist to a certain degree. It doesn't matter how you were brought up, something will rub off onto a child from either family or society and they will accept it as fact, to some degree. Whether or not you "act" on it is a different story. You can unconsciously feel something, and then realize it, rationalize that that is the most RACIST feeling, and try and squash it, only to find the same thought resurfacing in a different situation. It's very frustrating. But all we can do is continue to pay attention to our reactions and thoughts, and the reasons behind them, and CHOOSE to act appropriately.