My wife has no desire to drive my car because she knows how particular I am about it and she is afraid to mess it up.

Agree 95%...

I would like to think that my girlfriend is not afraid of driving my car, but that she doesn't want to explain why she is not being careful with our car.

I'm extremely particular about cars, houses, equipment. I like them clean, well taken care of. Some people are not that particular, some are not particular at all. Sometimes you fell in love with a person that simply does not share that level of "particularity".

You should decide, the earliest the better, if you want to change your "level" for this person or if you are going to be arguing all the time about the "level".

but when i do drive his car i am much more careful with it because i know how much the car means to him. he has a lip on it with sport suspension and i am also afraid to scrape it, but he tells me its ok....that its jus a car, shit happens...

but when i do drive his car i am much more careful with it because i know how much the car means to him. he has a lip on it with sport suspension and i am also afraid to scrape it, but he tells me its ok....that its jus a car, shit happens...

You do realize that they are both of your cars right...? Or are you the happily married couples that has your own bank accounts and split up the bills every month. Now that's the sign of a trusting and sharing relationship.

I let my wife drive whatever car she wants. If I go out in the garage and my 335 is gone, well, she has a right to take it, its hers too. I'll just take our other vehicle.

You do realize that they are both of your cars right...? Or are you the happily married couples that has your own bank accounts and split up the bills every month. Now that's the sign of a trusting and sharing relationship.

I let my wife drive whatever car she wants. If I go out in the garage and my 335 is gone, well, she has a right to take it, its hers too. I'll just take our other vehicle.

Clearly, your wife understands how important the car is to you. I let my girlfriend drive my car on a regular basis because she too understands just how important the car is to me. At the same time, I've noticed that she is far too nervous when I'm in the car while she's driving. I say let her do her thing and have fun with the car. Fun is to be had by all. After all, Bimmers don't discriminate.

don't do it, especially in your car:
1/ while she is learning to drive the stick, u will probably drive each other crazy.
2/ i would go crazy just thinking what a rookie could do to my new clutch and transmission.