Social intelligence is the foundation of your game. You don't have to become a party animal or trendy hipster, but in general you should learn to communicate and vibe with people.The problem is that many of us are trapped in our own heads due to extended periods of isolation. We work and study alone, get worn out and go home to plug into the television […]

While the Law of Attraction is getting quite a bit of publicity these days, the concept has been around for centuries and has been known (and used successfully) by great minds throughout history. According to books like The Secret, there’s evidence that the law of attraction was used by Beethoven, Einstein and even Jesus, but you’ve also used it in your own […]

Everyone has at least one phobia, myself included. A phobia is defined as an irrational fear of something- although for a phobic this fear seems very real and very rational. Some phobics can even suffer from panic attacks, which are signified by heavy breathing, profuse sweating, a feeling of dizziness, and sometimes even fainting. Phobias can affect everyda […]

METHOD
Base Crush biscuits in a food processor or with the end of a rolling pin. Add melted butter and mixed spice and stir well to combine. Press into the base of a 20cm springform cake tin. Refrigerate until set.

Filling

Beat cream cheese until smooth. Add sugar and beat well. Add eggs and vanilla, again beating well. Chop half of the mango in to small pieces and fold into cheese mixture together with the yoghurt. Pour into chilled base and bake at 180 degrees celsius for 20 to 25 minutes or until firm. Allow to cool in oven with door slightly ajar. Refrigerate when completely cool.

Everyone has at least one phobia, myself included. A phobia is defined as an irrational fear of something- although for a phobic this fear seems very real and very rational. Some phobics can even suffer from panic attacks, which are signified by heavy breathing, profuse sweating, a feeling of dizziness, and sometimes even fainting. Phobias can affect everyday life, and many phobics would rather rearrange their lives than face their fears if given a choice.

Windows security looks like it’s already on track for its worst year this decade. The latest attack is a worm called Downandup, Downadup, Kido!, or Conficker (all the same thing), and it primarily seems to be being delivered via infected USB drives.

How’s it work? By tricking you into running the virus by modifying the way “autorun” works when you plug in a drive. Look closely at the screenshot above and you’ll see two entries for “Open folder to view files.” The one at the top is a phony entry that actually installs the virus on your machine… but of course it’s the default selection that pops up when you plug in a drive. Once installed, the virus spreads like crazy via a separate flaw in Windows networking system (now patched, so be sure to run Windows Update if you haven’t lately) and can quickly infect a whole office. F-Secure has more analysis on the clever way it tricks you into installing the malware yourself.

How bad has it gotten? Estimates range from 3.5 million infected in the first four days after it bean spreading to 9 million impacted… and gettng worse. By now I figure the numbers could top 15 or 20 million.

From an antivirus standpoint, fixing Downandup isn’t easy. The worm is particularly problematic because of the tricky way it involves the user in installing the software, bypassing auto-installation safeguards, plus its sophisticated way of avoiding detection, as it morphs its code constantly (using randomized elements) to make traditional, signature-based detection almost impossible.

Your best strategy for avoiding Downandup? Turn off AutoPlay/AutoRun on your computer (with Windows XP, TweakUI is the easiest way to do it). If you do see an AutoPlay dialog box like the one above, just close it and eject the disc or thumbdrive; browsing the drive manually for individual files should keep you uninfected, but you’re best off not using the drive at all. And of course, make sure your system is fully patched via Windows Update.

What if you already have Downandup infecting your machine? Try your standard antivirus utility as a fix.

We’ve officially reached a new level of creepy virtual interconnectedness, folks. If a recent study by Intel is to be believed, our society is thisclose to trading good old-fashioned carnal pleasure for the sweet humming of our laptops. That’s right—our daily google search sessions are officially (almost) as satisfying as sex. According to the study, a whopping 46% of women said they’d rather give up sex for two weeks than their Internet connection. Men, believe it or not, weren’t too far behind, scoring 30% in favor of the Internet. So it may be safe to venture that a solid 1 out of every 4 would rather wake up to a list of CNN news blurbs than sore and sweaty after a night of passion. Interesting. Scary. But perhaps this will cut down on STI’s? The Internet has been slowly and steadily taking over our lives for awhile now, but who would’ve ever thought our favorite gossip blog would etch such an unapologetic groove in our daily comfort zones? The Internet was also, not surprisingly, in the top position for most coveted extraneous expense. Eating out, shopping, cable television, and gym memberships were no match for the mighty world wide web. Of course, this just reinforced and green lighted the tech-heads’ vision of pitching products by intel chips. While I will never underestimate reading about the plummeting Dow, YouTubing all those “Put A Ring On It” Beyonce impersonators (don’t act like you haven’t), and the root and cause of all time wasted—Facebook, one last question remains: Would that male 30% remain steady without Internet porn? Now that’s the million dollar question.

Ever find yourself thinking about that special someone… and then slapping yourself as you realize it’s a terrible idea? Maybe she’s just too young or maybe he’s your subordinate at work. Whatever the reason, having a crush on someone is not the problem. The real issue is your own restraint and self-control.

Steps:
1. Examine why the crush is a bad idea. First, ask yourself why you would be so interested in this particular person over all others. Obviously, there is the primal attraction factor – there are just certain people you will find attractive, whether it’s appropriate or not. But the key here is to voice your objections in a way that your sense of propriety hears you. If she’s a lot younger than you are, why are you interested in a young woman whose interests and priorities will be very different from your own? If you are into a guy who works for you, are you more into the idea that you can call the shots than the actual person? If you have a crush on your brother’s girlfriend, is it more about getting one over on your brother than actual interest in the girl?
2. Project the potential fallout. If you were to get involved with this person, how would the fallout affect you? Her/Him? Your friends, family, co-workers? Think as if it were a chess game – visualize the next several moves: “If I do this, then s/he will do that; then my brother will hate me; then the first time we argue I will lose my job; then I will die homeless and penniless and nobody else but my parents will ever love me.” Well, it might not really be that dire, but you get the idea. Is the potential relationship with this person worth all the trouble you will endure, and what are the chances the relationship would survive all of the chaos that will ensue?
3. Consider your reputation. What will other people think – will they think more, or less of you? It’s not cool to try to steal your buddy’s girl. You might end up with her, but you will lose your friend. If you’re older, and the boy is a minor, you will be considered a cradle-robber – and on top of that, if you actually pursue that relationship into a sexual situation, you could be looking at jail. Sex with a minor is worse than inappropriate – it’s a crime. You may be feeling warm fuzzies when you look at that middle schooler, Mr. High School Sophomore, but if you think you can take a 12-year-old to the prom, think about how your peers will look at you. They’ll think you couldn’t get someone your own age – you had to go for someone a lot younger, not as savvy, not as sophisticated, and not as educated. That’s not a good way to be looked at by your peers. And it’s nothing compared to what the adults (especially her parents) will be thinking.
4. Think about your future. If you get involved with someone inappropriate, you will not just be dealing with problems now. You will be dealing with the fallout far – maybe years – into the future. Let’s say the person you are crazy about is really kind of a … well… not very nice person. She’s nice to you, but she isn’t very nice to your friends or relatives. You start ditching your friends and family to spend time with her. She’s super flaky, and you become flaky, too – going back on your word because she wasn’t willing to do whatever it was you promised you’d do – and won’t let you do it, either. Even after you break up with her, everyone you know will still view you with distrust. They will question your judgment for ever getting involved with someone like that in the first place.
5. Distract yourself. Now that you’ve analyzed, considered, and really meditated upon how terrible this idea is, you need to stop obsessing on this person. No matter how tempting it is to think about him/her, fantasize, and get yourself all tingly doing it, stop it. Do something else. In loose psychological terms, it’s called redirecting behaviors and thought patterns. Train yourself to think about something else every time you start thinking about him/her – think of being at Disneyland. Think of being on a train with your family. Think of being a superhero. Whatever. Just think about something else. Turn on the radio or TV, and get some other thoughts running through your head. If you still feel yourself reverting to thoughts of your forbidden crush, call a friend. Go see that friend – get out of the house and out of your head.
6. Avoid the person. If you can remove yourself from that person as much as possible, the crush will weaken. In order to sustain our adoration for someone, we generally need to reinforce it by seeing the person. (Absence usually doesn’t make the heart grow fonder, actually.) Of course, this isn’t always practical, but do what you can to minimize contact with the other person.
7. Focus on the negative. Almost by definition, a crush involves an idealized picture of someone else. But everyone is human, and even your crush has characteristics that are probably not pleasant. Perhaps he says mean things to people, or maybe she listens to music that you think is dumb. Or perhaps he or she merely ignores you. Try to work up some negative energy about the person that you can focus on in order to weaken the crush.
8. Wait it out. All crushes fade with time. If you can avoid doing something regrettable and keep your feelings in check, eventually those powerful emotions will run their course.
9. Ask someone else out. It doesn’t matter if that person does not measure up to your “wrong crush.” What does matter is that you spend some time in the pleasant company of someone other than that person. Start dating others, and keep an open mind. That person is off limits to you, and you have to start re-wiring your brain to think about being with someone else.
10. Make it right. Let’s face it: sometimes, you can’t convince yourself that you don’t feel the way you feel. If you’ve tried to fight it, all to no avail, and you still find yourself sighing over him/her, then make it right. There are ways to make an inappropriate crush totally appropriate – the most important thing to remember is to make it right FIRST – and then, and only then – get involved. And then, true love wins the day!

* If she’s your brother’s girl, then you have to behave as a gallant gentleman, and never hit on her. If your brother breaks up with her, you can ask your brother if he’d mind you asking her out. Maybe he wouldn’t mind, and there certainly is precedent for it. If he doesn’t break up with her, or if he won’t give you permission, you’re out of luck unless you are prepared to accept the consequences – your brother may not speak to you.
* If you’re interested in someone much younger, wait for him/her. Don’t get involved with anyone. Bide your time, remain friendly, but don’t get too close. Love him or her from afar until it is appropriate. For example, you are Mr. High School Sophomore and she is Miss 6th Grade Middle School. You will need to graduate from High School, go on to college, and maintain a friendly relationship with little Miss 6GMS until she is close to the end of high school herself. Once you are both finished with High School a 5-year age difference becomes unimportant – but while she is a minor, it could be deadly to your future. And then, what good would you be to her?
* If you are into a subordinate, let him know of your interest, but you must agree that one of you must transfer to another department, or one of you must resign (assuming that the feeling is mutual, of course) before you can act on your feelings and develop a personal relationship.

Tip:
* Remember that emotions or physical attractions can and must be controlled to match different social situations. Just because you have them does not mean it’s okay to act on them all the time. Taking the time to create healthy relationships now gives you a long-term way to explore all your feelings safely.

Warning:
* If you date another person to keep your mind off your crush, make sure that you are actually attracted to this person. It can be annoying and hurtful to be led into a ‘fake’ relationship.

In college, I took a class called “The Author’s Intention,” which analyzed whether readers (and even the authors themselves) can ever really understand the meaning behind a piece of writing. When we read a poem or a story, we bring our own experiences into the text and that often yields vastly different interpretations. Thus, the meanings of things such as songs, which can be interpreted as poems set to music, become blurred and stretch far from what their writers might have originally intended.

Because many of us use music as an outlet for our deepest feelings, we are often shocked when the meanings that we have given to certain songs prove false. Just as some literary works are commonly misinterpreted, there are songs with meanings that are consistently misinterpreted. All too often, we find out that the songs we put on mix tapes for our crushes, or those we listen to on repeat in the midst of bad breakups, were written from a completely different view.

1. “Born in the U.S.A.,” Bruce Springsteen
Almost everybody knows the chorus of this song, but fewer know the rest of the lyrics, which is why Springsteen loudly singing, “I was born in the U.S.A.” is often taken as a patriotic proclamation. However, it’s really about veterans returning from the Vietnam War and facing the harsh realities of how they’re treated post-war. The misinterpretation only grew after both Ronald Reagan and Bob Dole used the song on their campaign playlists.

2. “Losing My Religion,” R.E.M.
When Michael Stipe sang about being in a corner and losing his religion, he wasn’t referring to a relationship with a higher power, as many believe. To “lose one’s religion” is actually a Southern phrase that means to run out of patience or to be very frustrated by a person or situation. This song is actually about having a crush on somebody and constantly looking for assurances that the love is not unrequited.

3. “Every Breath You Take,” The Police
How many people foolishly chose this song for their first dance as newlyweds? I’m not sure why this song is misinterpreted so universally as a love song. Do people listen to lyrics? If someone says to you, “Every game you play, every night you stay, I’ll be watching you,” wouldn’t you be more than a little creeped out? I guess that’s the power of Sting—even his stalker anthems are considered romantic.

4. “Hollaback Girl,” Gwen Stefani
I’ve gotten into arguments with people over this song. Many believe it means that, by not being a “hollaback girl,” Stefani is saying that she won’t respond to guys who “holla” at her or treat her poorly. Actually, she’s using a cheerleading metaphor—a hollaback girl is one who repeats back the cheers that the head cheerleader yells. With this song, Stefani is stepping away from the pack and proclaiming herself independent. She’s the head cheerleader giving orders, not one of the cheerleaders who simply repeat them back.
5. “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds,” The Beatles
Many assume that this song refers to drug use, especially since the capitalized words in the title start with the same letters used to denote a particular hallucinogenic drug. However, John Lennon stated that the origins of the title come from a drawing that his son did of his friend, Lucy. The title of the picture was “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds,” so John used that for his song. Whether the actual meaning behind the song is about drug use is debatable, but the title itself is not meant to refer to an LSD trip.

6. “Crash into Me,” Dave Matthews Band
I’m pretty sure I put this song on a mix CD I made for a crush my sophomore year of high school. At the time, I thought it was a beautiful love song about longing for someone else. Well, it is … but the person singing is actually a perv! These lines give him away: “Oh I watch you there through the window and I stare at you. You wear nothing but you wear it so well.” How did I miss the peeping tom aspect? The part about him wanting to be “tied up and twisted” is a bit off-putting as well …

7. “The One I Love,” R.E.M.
It sounds like the perfect song for a radio dedication when Michael Stipe sings, “This one goes out to the one I love.” Oh, except until he gets to the line about the one he loves being “a simple prop to occupy my time.” Ouch! This song hardly inspires romantic feelings; actually, it makes Stipe seem like kind of a jerk. He’s basically saying the one he “loves” is nothing more than a waste of his time that he’s abandoned. Not exactly an uplifting declaration of true love, but people seem to focus on that first line before listening to the rest of the song, hence the constant misinterpretation.

8. “This Land Is Your Land,” Woody Guthrie
I remember singing this song in elementary school and thinking it sounded so pleasant and positive. It’s actually a critique of the idealistic version of the U.S. that Irving Berlin sang about in “God Bless America.” His displeasure is subtle, but made obvious upon careful examination of lines like “As I was walkin’, I saw a sign there and that sign said—No trespassin’. But on the other side, it didn’t say nothin’! Now that sign was made for you and me!” This song is often grouped with “God Bless America” as patriotic tunes, but Guthrie had the opposite intention.
What music essentially boils down to is not necessarily the meaning songs are meant to convey, but what meanings we actually derive from them. After all, more important than what messages artists intend to get across is their desire for people to connect with the music. However, considering how striking the differences are between what the aforementioned songs mean and how they’re interpreted, it might be wise to stick to the author’s version. I know I’ll think twice before putting “Crash into Me” on my next mix CD.

A woman named Natalie Dylan is auctioning off her virginity. The top bid is currently $3.7 million.Click image for the link.

Now the last time I mentioned when a lady was doing this almost everyone went nuts and thought she was totally wrong for doing it. But if you think about it, $3.7 million is a ton of money for a one night stand. I see people compromise their principles for $50. I also hear of people that lose their virginity in less that perfect settings. $3.7 million for a one night stand. Would you have sex if offered $3.7 million?