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Friday, April 15, 2016

Today's post probably needs a bit of back story, so here goes. When we moved Mom three years ago she was still fairly functional, she just couldn't take care of herself safely living alone any longer. With that in mind, we just moved her and her stuff with no understanding what trouble it may bring down the road. Thinking back in retrospect, how could we know, we had never dealt with this level of dementia and didn't have a clue that Mom's mind would deteriorate to this extent.

Mom's stuff. That's where the fun really begins. When I say we moved Mom's stuff, that's just what we did. No we didn't move her entire house full of belongings, but we moved the items we thought she needed plus the stuff she likes without sorting any thing out. i.e. full dressers, photo albums, books, important papers, etc.

OK, now we can continue.

Yesterday, Mom came out for breakfast carrying two cards in her hand like they were ancient Greek scrolls and made of gold. Once she was sitting at the table with coffee in hand she asked me if I had received these. She continued by explaining they had came in the morning mail. Well I knew they didn't come in the mail, we get afternoon mail, they were from the stash of treasure hidden in her room, but I told her I hadn't received any thing and asked what they were.

She handed me both cards, and like a card she brought out to show me Monday, they were both wedding invitations. I only looked at one of them but it was from 1969. I showed the her the date and explained that I was only 11 years old when that came in the mail. Of course she wanted to argue that it just arrived in the mail, but again I killed the conversation by bringing her food. Once breakfast was on the table all thoughts about weddings were lost.

After breakfast Mom stayed up and watched TV for a bit then shuffled back to bed leaving her prized announcements on the table. Once she was back in her room I grabbed the invitations and hid them away to show Paula later, still never looking inside the second card.

Once Paula made it home from work I handed her the announcements to look over. Within a few seconds she started laughing and handed me the one I hadn't bothered to look at. It was actually the reception announcement from my first wedding in 1977.

Well my announcement gave us a good laugh, but it was a real indicator into Mom's state of mind. Not only does she not know me, she didn't even recognize the announcement was about her son. It also confirms that Mom really has no concept of time or space. If she sees a dated item, that's the current date and that's that as far as she's concerned.