Have you ever met someone who does the same thing over and over or who has the same thing done to them over and over and you just sit there thinking, ‘you’re the common denominator, dude’?

What does it mean to be the common denominator?

It simply means your energy and actions are producing the effects in your life not other people or circumstances. If something is happening to you repeatedly or you are attracting ‘bad’ relationships — there is but one commonality, you.

You may, in fact, be an asshole (‘why do people always leave me?’, ‘why do people stay away from me?’, ‘why don’t I have any friends?’, ‘why do my staff always drop me?’, ‘why does my dog roll his eyes at me’, etc)

If people make a dash for the door upon your arrival, it may not be that every time you enter a room people suddenly have emergencies they need to take care of — YOU may be the infamous *big, scary, booming voice* COMMON DENOMINATOR.

I know some of you may be laughing, thinking that anyone who scares people away on that scale surely has to know it’s them, right? You couldn’t be more wrong.

There are people out there (and I know a few) who, surprisingly, have no clue that they are the reason behind the scattering of people when their presence is felt. They are so pumped up on their own ego tripping that they wouldn’t even consider that perhaps they are at fault.

What Can You Do if You Fit the Criteria or Know Someone Who Does?

If you know someone like this (and I never normally condone following the masses) run! Be like sheep and herd your way out the nearest available exit.

If you fit the ‘common denominator’ persona then I strongly suggest you take a long hard look at what vibes you are putting out. How can you better yourself?

Can you take a softer approach? Can you be humble?

Can you catch yourself when you feel your ego taking command?

Can you see things through the eyes of others (i.e. have ’empathy’ or ‘compassion’)?

Can you bite your lip instead of having to have the last word?

Can you let someone else win an argument even if you know you are right (i.e. save a friendship instead of having to always be right)? This is where wisdom and knowledge take effect. A wise man would rather save a friendship in lieu of being right and a ‘know-it-all’ will want to be seen as right even if it means he has no friends.

Can you pick your battles instead of feeling that you must be the victor of every fight out there?

Can you put the needs of others ahead of your own, every once in a while, when you know it could be important to do so?

Can you give without expecting?

Can you be kind in the face of unkindness?

If you can start to do some of the things listed above, you may start to move away from being disliked to being — dare I say — liked! Now, wouldn’t that be nice!

There is nothing like radiating love, kindness, compassion and joy — people respond really well to it and your life will take on a very rewarding shape.

People may actually gravitate towards you when you enter a room.

Cherie Roe Dirksenis a self-empowerment author, multi-media artist and musician from South Africa.

To date, she has published 3 self-help and motivational books and brings out weekly inspirational blogs at her site www.cherieroedirksen.com. Get stuck into finding your passion, purpose and joy by downloading some of those books gratis when you click HERE.

Her ambition is to help you to connect with your innate gift of creativity and living the life you came here to experience by taking responsibility for your actions and becoming the co-creator of your reality. You can follow Cherie on Facebook(The Art of Empowerment — for article updates). She has an official art Facebook page (Cherie Roe Dirksen – for new art updates). You can also check out her Facebook band page at Templeton Universe.

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