Summerfest offers quirky contests

Making music: Last year’s Summerfest was first planned as a concert celebrating the 20th anniversary of the Hilltown Ramblers; other bands, vendors, and community groups joined in Here, Jim Selkirk, at right, guitarist with the Hilltown ramblers, played with other acoustic musicians at last year’s event. This year, on Aug. 23, live music will be heard all afternoon at Berne’s town park into the evening. The line-up, after an open mic, starts at 1 p.m. and proceeds in this order: A Bunch of Guys; The Bluestones at 2:30 p.m., Shine Hill Road at 4 p.m., Red-Haired Strangers at 5:30 p.m., and The Hilltown Ramblers at 7 p.m.

BERNE — The second annual Summerfest, to be held Saturday at the Berne town park, will feature food, fun, crafts, and community — and quirky contests.

Gad-Zukes! It’s Sas-Squash in the Hilltowns!

It lurks in the back corner of your garden, growing, growing, growing. With seeds the size of hubcaps, it waits for the chance to burst out of the garden and into the kitchen!

No modest little stir-fry candidate, this is the Big Brother of zucchinis. Bring your biggest and best zucchini to the First Annual Hilltowns Squash-off! Prizes will be awarded for the Zuki-ville Slugger (heaviest), the Zu-Conda (longest) and the Sas-Squash (largest around).

Special categories: the Imper-zu-nator, the zucchini that looks most like a famous person, and the Zoo-kini, most like an animal!

No registration is necessary. Succhinis only; no other squash need apply.

Bring your Zukes early; judging is around 4 p.m.

Gee Whillikers!

Look at all the Whiskers!

Abe Lincoln wore one; so did Dr. Seuss. Don’t forget Moses and the Egyptians. Then there’s that pirate, Jack Sparrow. And the best known of all — Santa Claus! What did they all have in common?

Beards and moustaches!

How does your beard measure up? Full and fluffy, sparse and scratchy?

A pencil-thin moustache or a goatee? Mutton chops or a handlebar?

Join the Handsome Hilltown Hirsutes — that’s all the bearded men in town at the First Annual Beard and Moustache Championship at the Berne Summerfest.

Prizes and ribbons will be given in every category — Beards: Longest, Bushiest or Freestyle; Moustaches: Trimmed and slender with upward tips, Longest with downward tips, or Most Creative, uniquely shaped or cut.

No registration is necessary. No artificial beards are allowed.

Join the unshaven at the Berne Town Park at 1883 Helderberg Trail (Route 443) on Saturday afternoon, Aug. 23, around 4 p.m.

And stick around for the fireworks at dusk.

Editor’s note: Phyllis Johnson and Mary Alice Molgard are members of the Summerfest Steering Committee.