Help in Deciding to Leave or Stay Community Group

This group aims to gently help people decide about leaving or staying in their abusive relationship. This support covers whatever is needed to help the person be ready and able to go or stay; to actually make that decision and be confident it is the right one. The decision is a personal one and nobody can tell anyone what to do. We can only be with another person and help...

Whats wrong with me???

so i ended it for good yesterday. We'd been going back and forth for weeks.
this morning was awful. i had awful dreams last night about jon and how its over and he doesnt want me anymore, i kept waking up feeling like i was going to be sick.. at 4 this morning, i was freaking out so much that i finally started throwing up. i took an ativan, its helped me sleep a little but i kept waking up every couple hours to be sick. I thought this is what i wanted??? im the one who broke it off with him and now that its over, im so devastated about it its making me sick. what the fuk is wrongwith me??? what do i do???? i could really use some support or advice today if anyones out there :(

You did the hard thing....and it&#039;s scary....but trust me, the devil you don&#039;t know will be better than the one you do. The devastation is from acknowledging that the dream is over, that the man you thought you loved didn&#039;t really exist. So many hard realizations...but just keep one foot in front of the other. It will get better....it really will, and now you have an opportunity to create a life of JOY for yourself....

thank you so much for the support. this is so hard. i guess ur right, its just the loss of a dream.. of one that didnt really exist. the thing that scares and hurts me the most tho, is that he&#039;s going to move on and im going to be stuck here always wondering what could have been. one of the hardest things about it all too, is that he has two little girls that i got very attached too and they were very attached to me. thinking of them with a new &#039;stepmom&#039; just kills me. not being able to see them is killing me. him being with someone new kills me. im just feeling very lonely and sad right now :(

jamie, I joined this group because I saw you were in it. I had no idea you were struggling so before the holidays. There is nothing wrong with you. When you go through something like this your body reacts like it is in detox. You can have all of the physicals that come with extreme upset and detoxification of the nervous system. Jamie you are a young and talented woman who deserves all of the &quot;Good&quot; in life and that includes a good relationship. Be patient...work on yourself, prepare yourself like the &quot;goddess&quot; you are so that when the moment is right...you will be ready...L

things are still tough. :( im still having a hard time with it. i got back with him for a little while.. i was having such a hard time and i was just feeling so sick, i couldnt take it anymore. then about a week ago we got into it really bad and it turned physical. i havent seen him since but he keeps texting me with how much he loves me and missses me and pleeeaaase will i see him. i&#039;ve refused everytime but it hasnt been easy.. i have 2 broken fingers. i feel my strength slipping because the sadness and lonliness is starting to hit me, but theres no way i could ever go back. this is really hard and i dont know what to do to keep myself busy enough to not feel lonely and bored and want to be with him. i dont know.. this is all just so SAD. i lost my 2 little step daughters that meant the world to me and brought a smile to my face everytime i saw them. but i know i cant be with him just so i can stay with them. :( i dont know, i could still lots of support if anyones out there.

Jamie, I am so sorry about this. Unfortunately, the common path of abuse is that it escalates....and it obviously did. I am so sorry about the girls...Maybe you can stay in contact with them through another path? Like through their grandparents....

It&#039;s hard...when I moved out I had to leave my 15 yr old son w/ him, and then had to repair that relationship too, tho it is now better than ever, without my ex&#039;s intervention and influence. But I know that it&#039;s different w/ little ones, they don&#039;t have cell phones or any autonomy to allow you access to them. Just try to stay in touch any way you can....I know of people who have become friends w/ their ex&#039;s ex&#039;s (previous wives of ex&#039;s) and have relationships with the kids that way.

Hi Jamie -- Just wondering how you are doing now that you are months out? I am trying it like you and let me tell you I can relate!! So wondering how you are doing. i am okay but it is very hard.... hard to stick to your guns.... stick to what your mind and body wants you to do.

theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??

I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...

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