When Bullying Affects Your Kids

I’m talking about something that has not only greatly affected my 9-year-old son, but also my entire family. Sam was the target of a bully who was relentless in his pursuit. So much so, that we had to pull Sam from school mid-year and move him into a different school.

His heart was wounded. His self-confidence dinged. His stress level was off the charts.

It was all I could do to not take the bully out myself. However, that’s illegal so I decided against it. But I know you can relate when I say… “Don’t. Mess. With. My. Cubs.”

Well slowly but surely, Sam is on the mend. He has been so courageous. He shows such resilience. And we all have seen first-hand that God is in the business of restoration.

Friends, bullying is reaching epidemic proportions with our kids and within our schools and we need to stand against it. The statistics are alarming. According to an article titled “School Bullying Statistics – The ABCs of Harassment”…

Over 75% of students are subjected to harassment by a bully or Cyber-Bully and experience physical, psychological and/or emotional abuse.

On a daily average 160,000 children miss school because they fear they will be bullied if they attend classes.

On a monthly average 282,000 students are physically attacked by a bully each month.

Every seven minutes a child is bullied on a school playground with over 85% of those instances occurring without any intervention.

A child commits suicide as a direct result of being bullied once every half hour with 19,000 bullied children attempting to commit suicide over the course of one year.

Other stats show that a bully:

Is 6x more likely to be incarcerated by the age of 24.

Is 5x more likely to have a serious criminal record when he grows up.

Has been the target of bullying in the past (2/3 of students report this).

And it’s no wonder, because the average child has watched 8,000 televised murders and 100,000 acts of violence before finishing elementary school.

These statistics make me sick to my stomach. You, too?

Sisters, this isn’t God design. And as parents, we cannot be passive when it comes to protecting our children.

Click here to head over to my post onCWAHM (Christian Work At Home Moms). I’m giving a lot of crucial information about the different types of bullying and warning signs to watch for.

Based on our own experience, I’ll be offering suggestions on how to help prepare your kids as well as what to do if they are already a victim of bullying.

Reader Interactions

Comments

I totally share your outrage. I was bullied. Both my girls have been bullied. We have told our girls to use words first, but if it comes down to it, we have given them permission to defend themselves physically, if needed.

My way of fighting back is to start a ministry to support girls, particularly those who have been bullied. If you’re interested, I’ll message you w/details.

Wendi… wow. It is everywhere, yes? It makes me so sad that we’re seeing the incidents increase and now reach our kids. And as a mom, it infuriates me to no end. Just how are we to raise kids with strong self-esteem in a world hell-bent (literally) to destroy them? God. That’s our only hope! And when we lean on Him and ask Him for protection and guidance, He provides… every time. Bless you, sister! And bless your ministry to help those girls affected by bullies! Way to be on the front lines… Go get ’em!

Thanks for your post. My son was a victim of a bully at church. It broke my heart when I realized what was going on especially since it had been going on a for a few months. As soon as I realized there was an issue I went to the Children’s Minister. The issue was immediately addressed but, wow my eyes were opened. I know bullying takes place at school but church is suppose to be a sanctuary for our children. It just reminds me how important it is to pray for the protection of our children everyday.

Mary, I am finding – like you – that no place is safe from a bullying situation. All the more reason that we need to teach our kids about it and be watchful at every turn. AND PRAY like crazy for protection. Right on, sister.

Carey,
Thank you for your post. Two of my three girls have been bullied, and it went on for months before I found out. I too encouraged my girls use their words first, but when I realized that their teachers knew and weren’t doing anything to stop it, I immediately went to the school and talked with the Guidance office. Unbelievably, the worst bullying situation we experienced was at the hand of a teacher! The teacher threw objects at my child, called her names, and ade her sit herself b/c “she wasn’t smart enough to be in the gifted class” with her classmates. I say I was irate doesn’t even begin to cover it. We had a meeting with the school’s staff, and the teacher became so angry that she began bullying me! That’s when she was put on leave and had to go to retraining classes.

God has truly helped us to help the girls to forgive the people involved, and it has caused my oldest daughter to have much more compassion and love for others. God does indeed give us beauty for ashes….

Judi… I am so grateful that you chimed in today! What an amazing story and proof that bullies aren’t only active in our youth… but also in our adulthood. Yes, I’ve run into a few of those myself. I think you mentioned a key component when you talked about forgiveness. It’s for our benefit… not theirs. It keeps the bitterness from decaying our hearts. And how cool that when you daughter did forgive, God blessed her with an extra dose of compassion. I call that victory! You’re a good momma…. Bless you!

I was shocked by the statistics. What a wake up call… obviously God has you in this particular arena for such a time as this Carey. He has given you a heart for the broken… no matter what age they are. The enemy is so strategic in his attempts to steal life and joy. Breaks my heart – challenges me to pay attention to what is happening around me and pray for protection for not only my own children but those around them. Thank you for this.

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Meet Carey

Hi! I'm Carey -- a speaker, author and life coach honest about my life and faith, stumbles, fumbles and all. My ministry focuses on helping women untangle their self-worth from the "I'm-not good enough" messages and reminding them of their immeasurable value. Because when a woman knows her value, she is freed up to live with purpose and joy.