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HELLO. EVERY YEAR SINCE MY SON WAS IN PRE-K I HAVE HAD PROBLEMS WITH HIM IN SCHOOL RANGING FROM BEHAVIORAL TO ACCADEMIC. HE IS NOW IN 5TH GRADE. I HAVE FOLLOWED ALL THE APPROPRIATE STEPS....IEPS, CLASSIFING, SPECIAL ED. ASSISTANCE, DOCTORS, TUTORING, NEUROLOGICAL BIO-FEED BACK, COUNCELING..(NO MEDS FOR MEDICAL REASONS)....I AM TIRED NOW DIVORCED NO FRIENDS NO FAMILY..... I HAVE LOST NUMBERIOUS JOBS DUE TO SCHOOL MEETINGS AND LOSS OF BABYSITTERS. MY SON IS NOW IN FIFTH GRADE AND HAS A READING LEVEL OF A SECOND GRADER. I DID FIND THE ARTICLE HERE ABOUT NON-VERBAL LD WHICH HE DEFINATLEY HAS.....FUNNY NO ONE COULD EXPLAIN THAT TO ME THE HUNDRED TIMES I ASKED DOCTORS AND OTHER PROFESSIONALS WHY HE COULD NOT DECIFER SOCIAL CUES? I WILL TURN THE ARTICLE IN TO SCHOOL TOMMORROW. ANYWAY MY FEELING IS NOW...OR SHOULD I SAY QUESTION IS...HOW DO I FIT IN ANYTHING EXTRA NOW TO HELP HIM WITH HIS READING? AND HOW DO I MAKE THE OTHER KIDS STOP PICKING ON HIM CAUSE ALL THE TEACHERS DO IS YELL AT HIM OR PUT HIM IN ISS. WHAT DO I SAY TO PARENTS HOW TELL THEIR CHILDREN NOT TO BE FRIENDS WITH MY SON BECAUSE HE DOESNT LISTEN TO THE TEACHERS?

OK JUST THE READING STUFF. HE IS SO FAR BEHIND AND WITH ALL THE OTHER SCHOOL STUFF I FEEL IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO GIVE READING THE TIME IT NEEDS? CAN THIS BE DONE IN A PUBLIC EDUCATION SETTING? IF NOT I AM COMMITTED TO TEACHING MY SON, BUT I DONT HAVE THE FINANCIAL MEANS TO HOME SCHOOL. HE DEFINATELY NEEDS ONE ON ONE TEACHING AT THIS POINT.
HOPE ALL OF THIS MADE SENSE. I HAVE BEEN AT THIS FOR A LONG TIME RESEARCHING AND INVESTIGATING, BUT WITH ALL OF THIS ADVICE NOTHING IS REALLY REALISTIC. OR MAYBE I AM DOING SOMETHING WRONG.

Your son is three years behind in reading why isn't he qualified for special education? I see fustration from your son and yourself. When was the last time he had a psychological evaluation if it has been less than two years work with a teacher to push for him to be retested. If it has been three years he can be tested again. Write a letter to request that he be retested.

You need to join a support system for yourself. I would contact your intermediate school district they can direct you to a support program.

Take your documentation to the meeting. Do not be emotional at the meetings and take someone with you that can listen if it becomes overwhelming I recommend taping the meeting.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR REPLY HE WAS TESTED INDEPENDANTLY LAST YEAR BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO SEND HIM TO A SCHOOL FOR TROUBLED KIDS. I AM CONVINCED HE HAS NON VERBAL LD. I COULD HAVE CRIED WHEN I READ THE ARTICLE ON THIS SITE. IT FITS HIM TO A TEE. HE IS NOT A BAD KID HE JUST DOESNT GET THE WHOLE SOCIAL THING. WITH ALL OF HIS SCHOOL YEARS THE STAFF HAS BEEN MORE FOCUSED ON HIS BEHAVIOR THAN HIS ACADEMICS. YOU WROTE ABOUT SPECIAL ED. WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THIS? WHEN I ASK HIS SCHOOL THEY SAY THEY KEEP THEM MAINSTREAM THAT THERE ARE NO SPECIAL ED CLASSES JUST RESOURCE WHICH HE GETS. DO YOU THINK I CAN GET HIM MORE ONE ON ONE HELP. I ALSO STARTED TAPEING THE IEP MEETINGS LAST YEAR I GOT MUCH MORE RESPECT FROM THE SCHOOL AFTER THAT.

PS HE IS A GREAT KID NOT A MEAN BONE IN HIS BODY AND CAN LEARN WELL WITH ONE ON ONE TEACHING. ALTHOUGH AS HE GETS OLDER I SEE THE FRUSTRATION IN NOT KNOWING HOW TO RESPOND IN SOCIAL SCHOOL SETTING. I HAVE EVEN HAD THE VP TELL ME HE JUST DOESNT KNOW HOW TO NOT GET CAUGHT. IT MAKES ME VERY SAD. DO YOU KNOW OF A SPECIFIC TEST TO ASK FOR, FOR NONVERBAL LD

I suggest that you have him assessed by a developmental pediatrician. Honestly it sounds like your child may be on the autism spectrum or have NVLD. A developmental pediatrician should be able to diagnose your child along with other testing to provide the present levels of performance for your child academically, social and physically so that you have something to bring to the school for services and appropriate intervention. Your insurance should cover the testing if he has not had it done before independently thru a developmental pediatrician.

You could also use a psychiatrist or psychologist but you want to make sure they have extensive background and training in identifying and working with children on the autism spectrum disorder.

In helping my daughter with learning disabilities she needed a lot of one-on-one tutoring. There was no way I could afford such tutoring. And the school just doesn't offer one-on-one help. All they offered was resource room. So I had to do it myself. This meant every night at home we would spend hours with tutoring. All my hard work paid off she was finally able to learn pretty well in school and I bought her up to grade level in many subjects. But she always needed me to hold her hand all the way through high school.
James Nuttall -- Michigan
Good Luck