For a while, there didn’t really seem to be much happening on the political scene. Of course, that’s all changed since the Republican and Democratic Conventions. I hope everyone that is able to vote come November will do so. I know who I am going to vote for, and I don’t need to talk about it, or convince anyone that they need to change how they feel, or convert anyone to my way, or hate anyone for not voting the way I do. Or bring up the racist issue of the color of anyone’s skin.

What else? Oh, fracking will happen in NC because the loudest opponent MADE A MISTAKE and “accidentally” voted FOR FRACKING. Not that it probably ever could be stopped. I’m just noticing things, that’s all. But it is kind of bizarre how it passed. Fracking the earth is just the next step in fueling the electrical power plants that supply the energy needed to be on this computer typing this post, doing my job, communicating with folks, and yes, sharing *.

Which brings up the topic for today’s post, the many ways in which we can be using our dear, dear, friend, our smart phones.

TIME magazine recently featured 10 WAYS MOBILE TECHNOLOGY IS CHANGING OUR WORLD. Did you read it? I found it so very interesting.

“Just as remarkable as the power of mobility, over everything from love to learning to global development, is how fast it all happened. It is hard to think of any tool, any instrument, any object in history with which so many developed so close a relationship so quickly as we have with our phones. Not the knife, or match, the pen or page. Only money comes close – always at hand, don’t leave home without it. But most of us don’t take a wallet to bed with us, don’t reach for it and check it every few minutes, and however useful money is in pursuit of fame, romance, revolution, it is inert compared with a smart phone – which can replace your wallet now anyway.”

People from all age groups and income levels in 8 countries, the U.S., the U.K., China, India, South Korea, South Africa, Brazil and Indonesia were asked questions to find out and better understand attitudes concerning technology, being connected, and the average age thought appropriate for a child to own a mobile phone, which is 13 years!

I am in the minority in how I feel about it, that it is not good. For instance, I do feel like being constantly connected by technology is mostly a burden: 13%, vs. 76% that find it helpful.

That I place my cell phone in a different room from where I sleep (13%) vs. the 68% that sleep with it next to their bed. Three quarters of the group between 25 – 29 years of age sleep with their phones. Rather intimate I think, and stupid, since not one study has ever been funded to prove that the amount of radiation given off of our phones is harmful, or harmless!

32% of all respondents said they they would prefer to communicate via texting. Which broken down by age groups shows another surprising find:

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In response to the question, “Have you ever used a text message to…”, 73% of the 18-24 age group said yes, that they use texting for flirting with someone. 55% of the 25-29 age group said they used a text message to send suggestive pictures. And 36% of the 25-29 age group said they used texting to coordinate or commit adultery. Hmmm…what is going on? I think I need to get with the program, give the smart phone a 3rd chance to dominate my life, and start to rekindle the sexual excitement that I am lacking in my menopausal life with my partner, or, someone else.

Well, it doesn’t seem to be something that is going to stop or slow down any time soon.

The only question I have is with all these ways to be in touch, are we really connecting?

I’ll leave you with a couple of pictures of some flowers that my partner brought home from the tailgate market for me. It wasn’t a tweet of how much he loves me. Call me old-fashioned, but I love flowers, and you can’t do that via a text tweet (thanks Lisa for educating me on what can be done with a text!).

The one below is the Moon flower that opened the other night…I smelled something divine when I went out to dump the scraps on the compost pile, and realized that after waiting all summer for it to open, it had!

Peace, Joy, and Love, and I ain’t J/K-ing!

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Annette Dunlap, who has been a contributor to Oops50 in the past, has written a fascinating new book called The Gambler’s Daughter: A Personal and Social History, which weaves together a history of gambling among Jewish people through the ages with her own childhood experiences as the daughter of a compulsive gambler father. The book offers the religious and cultural origins of Jewish gambling as the backdrop for Annette’s father’s own personal history.

Here’s an excerpt that shows both Annette’s command of the English language and her unique and very insightful perspective on life:

“America is a nation of vast contradictions between what we promote as our values and how we actually put those values into action. We like to point to someone who emulates the rags-to-riches newsboy, Horatio Alger, but our preferred national heroes are those who have rapidly accumulated wealth through speculation and a streak of good luck. The American story gives lip service to hard work leading to financial success, but our tax code rewards those who have figured out how to make their money earn them more money” (p. 153).

This quote seems particularly compelling in this election year!

I could go on about the book, but what I really want to talk about is my friend’s courage in writing it.

I’ve known Annette, or “Netty,” since we were in high school together in suburban Maryland in the late sixties.

Annette

Back then, she was sometimes not an easy friend to have. She was loud and outspoken, when I was struggling to figure how much of my Southern upbringing I could hold onto and how much I wanted to discard. She used cuss words. She protested things, loudly and without apology, if she saw injustice lurking—from the Viet Nam War to school policies. I remember vividly how she marched up and down the hall outside of the yearbook office yelling her grievances—as I recall, she was upset about the extreme predominance in the yearbook of pictures of “cool” kids—to a completely unsympathetic audience of students passing nervously by her, their newly-formed personalities visibly shuddering from the encounter. But it didn’t faze Netty. She just kept marching.

I wasn’t sure what to make of her—except that I knew I was impressed at how she could do stuff that I would never have the nerve to do.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that she was dealing with things at home that I couldn’t even begin to imagine—her father’s compulsive gambling that had led to overwhelming debt, her mother’s extreme unhappiness and frustration at being forced to carry the lion’s share of the family’s financial burden, and Netty’s own burden of being compelled by her father to be a partner in deceit, when he would make her take his phone calls from creditors and lie to them about his whereabouts.

Granted, it took Netty a while to write this book, but it’s understandable that she had to wait until after her father and her mother were both dead. The important thing is that, once she decided to open herself up to the topic, she dove in. And I just want to salute her incredible courage in deciding to take this very personal journey. So, here’s to you, Netty, a brave and adventurous woman over fifty—and an excellent researcher and writer! Gambler’s Daughter is available on Amazon! Check it out!

I read a book that everyone seems to have read, and I found out it’s been made into a movie a while back. It’s called “Sarah’s Key”. I guess I am not on top of things, but that’s never bothered me before.

Hey, I just discovered The Public Library again too. It’s so great, because as much as I long to be swimming in the ocean these days, or relaxing in a thermal bath in Switzerland, I can’t. But getting lost in a good book is the next best thing, so go out and get your library card and start to read: and, it’s free.

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I have a friend who is so cool. His name is Tosh, and he has this site that has his book reviews. Whatever book he has said is great, well, it is. Check it out. You will find a book that is new to you, and perfect for your next mental get-away.

The beauty of flowers, the color of the blue sky, the smell of honey and clover and fresh-cut grass in the air…it sure makes me smile and feel like there is nothing wrong with the world.

I am feeling grateful and drinking in what is here in my garden.

I’ll finish this week’s post with a poem that I thought was by Rumi, but one that is actually by Rashani Rea. It’s a poem that you might want to read out loud: Enjoy!

VERBENA AND OUR HENS

There is a brokenness out of which comes the unbroken,
a shatteredness out of which blooms the unshatterable.

There is a sorrow beyond all grief which leads to joy.
And a fragility out of which depth emerges strength.

There is a cry deeper than all sound whose serrated edges cut the heart as we break open to the place which is unbreakable and whole.

When I was forty-four years old, I experienced a run of bad luck that culminated with a serious accident on my horse leaving me with a broken hip. Add this to a major midlife crisis, empty nest syndrome, and a slow steady weight gain of more than forty pounds and you will understand that I was in a real funk.

When I was able to put my walker aside and make a slow unassisted stroll, I found myself staring at a community bulletin board and reading a poster which advertised a police position at our local department. The key words that caught my eyes were, “No age is too old.”

I started exercising, eating less and striving toward a nearly forgotten teenage dream. I turned forty-five years old, passed all the department requirements and went to the police academy. Against all odds, I passed the rigorous physical and psychological torture to become the first female officer in the small Arizona town where I live.

I am now fifty years old and our first female detective. My daily shift consists of major felony cases including homicide with my specialty being sex crimes. I’ve written two books about my true-life adventures and write a weekly blog post at http://badluckdetective.com about the humorous side of my job.

I’m a menopausal woman with a badge and a gun. I can’t think of a better place than Oops50 to meet other women who are achieving their dreams or looking for inspiration to take life by the horns and make their mark.

Oops50 puts a smile on my face as I see what incredible women are achieving regardless of age and sometimes in spite of it. If the space program is brought back, my goal for age sixty-five is to be an astronaut. What could possibly stop me?

There are a handful of people I’ve met that have touched me deeply, and Nan is one of those. I met her in my freshman year at a college in a small town in Ohio way back in the fall of 1976.

That period is my least favorite in my entire life. In fact, Melinda, another long-time friend from way back in high school who went with me to Miami, feels the same. We have this ongoing argument as to who was the one who convinced the other to go to this college. And I know it was her who convinced me!

I first met Nan in the laundry room of the dormitory of McCracken Hall. I think I took Nan’s clothes out of the dryer, and she came in and asked what I was doing, and I yelled at her. I don’t remember really, but she does! I guess I like to show my strong emotional side (some have called it bitchiness) right away, as a sort of test. Wow, that was over 35 years ago, and whatever bond was made, it is still there.

It turns out that Nan thinks I am funny, and I think she is funny. That’s important to me. No one can be my friend if they don’t have the same sense of humor as me. I feel understood by her, and often communicated with her back then without talking. I know from experience that we are all multidimensional beings, and that language is overrated. Just ask my husband. I feel the same about Karen, who is in the picture on the lower right. I hope to write about her sometime soon.

I tend to have this curious nature in general, and value my friends opinions for new things and good products.

So I asked Nan a few questions:

What was the name of the first record you ever bought?

Hmmm, let me think a moment. Oh, it was Sukiyaki, the song that came out in 1963 that was sung in Japanese. My mom couldn’t stand it; it drove her crazy!

What is your favorite lipstick?

I usually use the Clinique freebies that they give out. And then, for special times, I have this one from Guerlain that is a little luxury, because it is so expensive (LIKE ALMOST $50!), and the case is so over the top, but the color and the way it makes my lips feel is really great. I really wish Guerlain would make it cheaper by not having the heavy metal case and mirror.

Which group did you like more growing up, The Beatles or the Rolling Stones?

Oh definitely The Beatles. There was something that I found dark and disturbing about the Rolling Stones.

What is the one thing you have to put on or have on that makes you feel good about leaving the house?

Thanks for sharing Nan. I still think my friends are cool, even if we are getting older! I’m really looking forward to this summer’s get-together. Melinda? Tina? Teresa? Mary Ann? Are you guys coming? Karen has a pool.