Keep Kids Safe Online

by Judy Dahl

There are roughly 30 million children using the Internet today, according to The Pew Internet & American Life Project. While it's a valuable resource for schoolwork, communication, recreation--and learning essential computers skills--there's a dark side. Sexual predators use it to locate and lure victims; identity thieves lurk; kids bully other kids online. But involved parents can minimize the risks to keep their kids safe.

As part of an undercover operation, an FBI agent recently posed as a 13-year-old girl in an online chat room. Within 40 seconds after she signed on--using a typical teenage-girl-type screen name and mentioning her (fake) age--close to 10 older men had responded, working quickly up to sexually explicit conversations. Sadly, this isn't unusual. The Internet can pose serious dangers for children.

Does this mean you should forbid your children to go online? Absolutely not, says Arnold E. Bell, unit chief of the FBI's Innocent Images Unit, Cyber Division, Calverton, Md. "The 'Net is a necessary tool for success in life today--you have to have cyber skills."

Just as in the noncyber world, parents can allow children to take advantage of opportunities while taking steps to keep them safe. "Common sense prevails," says Arnold, who has teenagers of his own.

The dangers

The risks are real, Arnold emphasizes. "People can pretend to be anyone online. A 49-year-old man might post a picture of an 18-year-old surfer on his Internet profile and say it's him." Predators gain children's trust, and then may send sexually explicit material, request nude photos, or even convince children to meet them--alone.

Law enforcement agencies, industry coalitions, and other nonprofit organizations are all working to prevent Internet abuses.

When accessing a Web site, one wrong keystroke can send a child to a sexually explicit site. "There are also hate group or racist Web sites; graphic violence; information about satanic or cult groups; advertising for alcohol, tobacco, and drugs; even recipes for making illicit drugs and bombs," says Joan Haznaw, professional trainer, LifeMatters/EAP (employee assistance program) and WorkLife Services--NEAS Inc., Waukesha, Wis.

"Kids may unknowingly divulge too much personal information on networking or chat sites that make them vulnerable," adds Danielle Yates, communications director at GetNetWise, Washington, D.C. If they mention their school's name and that they're on the track team, it wouldn't be too hard for a predator to find out their practice schedule, for example.

Add to these the dangers any online user faces, like phishing e-mails that look like they're from legitimate businesses, but ask readers to provide information that criminals can use to commit identity theft or other fraud. It all seems daunting, but you can use a combination of active parenting and technology to minimize the risks.

Active parenting

"Whenever I talk with parents, I tell them to balance their fears with thoughts of the wonderful opportunities the Internet opens up for kids," says Haznaw. "I don't want to scare my own kids about the Internet as something evil; and if we preach, it just becomes more attractive to them. But stay involved and take an interest."

"People can pretend to be anyone online."

First and foremost, she advises, parents need to communicate openly and honestly with their kids. "Let them know of the potential dangers and why it's necessary for you to be involved, and set limits on their online activity."

Particularly with younger kids, make computer use a family experience, recommends Bell. "Don't drop kids in front of it and walk away--you're basically leaving them with who knows who. Sit there and work through things with your kids."

This will help you learn the technology, too. "Most parents didn't grow up using a computer, unlike our kids," says Yates. "Actively understand what they're doing online, whether it's instant messaging or e-mailing friends. Establish trust with your kids so they can come to you if they see something they're uncomfortable with--and don't go ballistic and take away their computer if they do."

You also can use parental-control tools that can help eliminate unwanted e-mails, block sexually graphic and violent content, monitor kids' Internet use, limit their time online, and prevent them from giving out personal information. "Many of these tools are available as free downloads from your Internet service provider (ISP), or from Web sites like ours, GetNetWise.org," says Yates.

Haznaw offers other tips for keeping kids safe online:

Keep the computer in a busy room so you can monitor your child's use.

Set clear rules regarding computer use and enforce consequences for misuse.

Be clear with your children that they're never to give out personal information such as name, age, grade, school, address, phone number, photos, e-mail address, or credit card information without your permission.

Particularly with younger kids, make computer use a family experience.

Keep an eye out for changes in your child's behavior, such as secretiveness, inappropriate sexual knowledge, or difficulty sleeping. Address any concerns right away and if you discover that someone is attempting to exploit, entice, or threaten your child (or any child) online, contact your local police and the Cyber Tip Line, or 800-843-5678.

Check out Web sites such as NetSmartz.org, which have valuable, up to date information for kids and parents regarding Internet safety.

By educating your children early on, you're providing them with tools to keep themselves safe. And, says Bell, "by the time they're teens, hopefully you'll have a good barometer about how your kids normally act," and you'll easily identify unusual behavior. "I don't browbeat my kids any more," he adds. "They're very Internet-savvy."

Prevention

You're not alone in trying to protect your children from online dangers. Law enforcement agencies, industry coalitions, and other nonprofit organizations are all working to prevent Internet abuses.

"It's still a growing problem; the number of child-abuse cases is increasing, but that's partly because law enforcement efforts have increased and we're discovering and working more cases," says Bell. "With coordinated law-enforcement task forces like Project Safe Childhood, we can bring cases into federal court," and minimize jurisdiction problems.

"The Internet is a necessary tool for success in life today—you have to have cyber skills."

"I wouldn't say we have our hands around it yet, but we are attacking the issue in a global way," he continues. "We have a global task force with officers assigned from different countries, because every case we work has international tentacles."

Other coalitions and organizations also play a significant role. "We're not the only online-safety program," says Yates. "A few have federal funding, like the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children There are also industry coalitions, where ISPs have gotten together to pool their knowledge, provide tools, and educate the public."

Resource links

On these sites, you can learn about the risks kids face online, search for Internet-safety products, learn how to identify online trouble, review online safety initiatives, and get law enforcement contact information.