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Friday, November 26, 2010

Shopping: One Woman's Pleasure Is Another Man's Hell

SHOP PHOBIA: All Men Have It!

I hate shopping. I hate the process. Electronics are cool, but when it comes to clothes and boring appliances, men and women have very different ideologies. The truth is that Men and women shop in very different manners. For starters women actually enjoy shopping, men on the other hand, find shopping to be enjoyable as a chain saw swinging dentist appointment...with the dentist in question being blind; Simply put, men will keep rescheduling for as long as feasibly possible.

For The Gals who Rather not go through Child Birth

Men require an iron clad reason to shop, usually when their female loved ones reallocate their wardrobe to the trash bin. Women shop on an impulse, albeit of the planned 'lets spend all day at the local stores just looking around' variety or the, I need new clothes because everyone has seen my wardrobe disorder, coupled with an infection of month old, twice worn clothes. Whenever possible, men are perfectly happy to let their female loved ones shop for them.We know you enjoy it, and you know we hate it.

Dunno what it is, but whats the harm in buying it? My Wallet Feels Heavy

Men, whose mothers and wives shy away from shopping for them, are drawn to one stop shopping solutions, if there was a mythical store where they could acquire a DVD player, Bare essential Clothes and a Bun Kebab, that would culminate in the perfect shopping experience. A Lassi would be nice too. Women have the tendency to work rather differently, preferring to visit as much shops as possible to evaluate the ware almost as if they fear the shops might suddenly close down.

Oh, yes, we love carrying your bags for you.

If a man skips a store on his shopping spree, he doesn't really care. On the other hand, a woman is devastated due to the minute possibility that the store may have re-stocked some new happening wardrobe since the last time she was in the store (in all likelihood the day before).

$$$

For women, shopping is an Olympic sport that combines finesse, debating, charm and the proverbial threat....to leave the store without buying anything. Men consider shopping a sport as well, however it's more akin to the 100 yard dash. The faster you get to the finishing line the better.

The Kind of Shopping Men are Happy to do with Women

Men will do all that is possible to prolong the use of their clothes to prevent future shopping. Whether it's keeping their clothes well, or simply being ambivalent to the presence of mildew and a healthy dose of patches (we were really excited when tatty clothing was 'in'). Women on the other hand, feel the necessity to discard their clothing with regularity. No self-respecting, straight man feels the urge to replenish his wardrobe on a seasonal basis.

The Heavier the Bag the Tighter the Noose

When men are forced to shop, they tend to select items that will match their current wardrobe, women have the proclivity to buy items that require a whole new array of other items....the cycle is endless. Much to the joy of the consumer industry.

Haggling; Despite putting together complex mergers and acquisitions deals and negotiating multi-year contracts, very few men know how to haggle properly, one can attribute this to their general lack of experience and the general comatose state of mind Men are in while being dragged from store to store by their significant others. Men will very simple look at the price quoted, if it's considered fair they'll pay it.

An approximation of what a woman looks like when you deny her shopping rights

Across generations and hordes of crying shopkeepers lying in their wake, women have developed haggling into an art form worthy of Sadequain; Mind Boggling. Any layman lucky enough to properly observe a woman indulging in her dark art, the words 'Hostage Negotiator' come to mind.

Kim Kardashian Secretly Buying a Sweater for Gorilla Bananas

In addition women are hardly strangers to manipulation, my own little sister, in her early shopping days, once swooned when a jeweler quoted her a price for an item, proclaiming her poverty, once the gentle shop keeper pointed out that the substantial wad of rupees sticking out from her purse.

What do you $%&$ Mean Credit Limit!

She immediately switched tactics and questioned the man's honor for charging so much from a such a young girl. At which point, the jeweler realized that there was no winning the argument. He reluctantly brought the price down to more acceptable levels.....My sister was 9 years old at the time.

Haha, I'm pretty enough to make you go broke

A guy is far more likely to buy the cheapest possible clothing substitute and brag to his friends how little he paid for it (After adding a 20% discount on what he actually paid). A woman on the other hand, tends to shy away from such indecency but will, to her friends and husband aka financier, typically add 20% to her buying price, not to mention add a brand label.

The Good Kind of Shopping

Making Clothes: Men don't make clothes; they tend to have an affection with all things ready made. You give a man a chunk of cloth and he'll wonder if the shop keeper mistakenly thought that his customer either asked for new sheets or was preparing to go to hajj. Women on the other hand, like nothing better to get their hands on some kapra (cloth) and go to work on it; apparently 'fashion designer' is embedded in their genetic makeup.

Women, wherever possible will shop in packs, whenever a hostile negotiation over the price of tooth picks is ongoing, their team will either participate or look judgmentally at the said shopkeeper. It's a team effort. It's also a social factor and a way for womenfolk to bond. Men, shop alone, it's not an outing, it's a solo drive-by laden with as few receipts as humanly possible.

Getting Married for the Gifts

Shopping is a part of all of our lives, but for those who shop; Proceed with caution. Women Don't Mess Around....

Shopping is never on the agenda when it comes to spending time with my husband. He'll drive me nuts. I rather leave him at home...with the the children...and go solo.http://www.ashafullife.blogspot.com

are you kidding? i hate shoppping. with a passion. i'd much rather prefer having a personal shopper. unless it's for books. then i'm all over it. and i absolutely despise kapra shopping. i leave that up to the other females in my family..

I normally hate shopping. It's so hard to find stuff that I like and I can wear that isn't a bazillion dollars. I am cheap. I hate spending money if I don't need to. Over the years my mom has spent lots of money to make the wardrobe that I have now. Some items of clothing I've had since I was 12. I only discard items if I never wear them, they don't fit anymore, or they are worn to the point of looking ratty. I don't want to look like a homeless person.

This is keeping me from studying you know and I have two consecutive midterms tomorrow.

I like shopping but I suck at haggling. That's what mommy's there for! (I get too shy to haggle damnit!)

I loooove shopping. Its so much fun, there are so many pretty things and so many different types and so many shoes and tops and pants and cloth and colours and shiny and pretty and sparkly and happy! Pata hai Tiara has the prettiest and softest shoes and just for 450 too! I use them for uni and they wear out really quickly so then I just get another pair cause they're so cheap!

Men shop when they need something, and women shop as a sport, leisure activity, way of life, and all kinds of other dumb things that shouldn't factor into the event of buying crap. We just see it differently.

I have to go shopping tomorrow, but it's with my nephews, so I don't mind.

Does ditching the last five marks question because you have to go to the bathroom constitute as going great? :(

Oh dude I so can't haggle, I just count on the guy being nice and dropping a few rupees off on his own, like taking 900 instead of 920 and the like. That happens very little. :D

Duh, because they're all so pretty and we can't choose! Oh you know what, my mom has to go shopping in the evening to get shoes for my brother's engagement, and I'm tagging along. I'll probably wrangle a pair of gladiators out of papa, and new shoes for the engagement maybe, because I've worn both pairs of my fancy shoes to the bhabi's and they've admired my shoes too so I can't wear old shoes to my only big brother's mangni!

Although I like your blog I shall seriously have to DISAGREE with you here!. You cannot really generalize like this!

I happen to know a really nice, (and totally straight) guy who just LOVES to shop, not only for himself, but occasionally accompanies his sisters and mom to the stores as well to help pick out clothes for THEM.

I was rather surprised when he told me this, and then once he offered to take me shopping along with him as well, and it was actually quite nice, he is a real patient shopper when it comes to giving advice or bargaining for things and such.I was really quite impressed.

But I guess exceptions are everywhere... I know a few girls who simply HATE to shop! Imagine!

Well yeah, but it only gets me a measly 18-something out of 25. And its a total marks scoring subject too, I was really hoping to up my GPA this semester, 3.3 is nothing impressive after all. :(

I disagree I'm too shy to haggle. :D

Well, would you still say that if I told you that every time I buy a pair of shoes, I find an older pair to give away, even if I could still wear them for a few more months? Ditto for clothes as well, if there's no space in my closet, that means there's space in the closets of my maids and so I give as many clothes to them as I can. Besides, I changed my mind, I'll wear the Vincci heels, they're really pretty. :D SHOES!

Haha, I remember my first shopping experience with my fiancé. He accompanied me to a Niké store so I could buy some running shoes. I ended up taking more than an hour looking for the perfect shoes, the perfect pair of shorts to go with them, and of course, the perfect sporty top to go with the shorts. After 30 minutes, he was already in a sour mood and told me he had expected it to take about 5 minutes, 10 minutes tops. I was like "Are you effing kidding me? 5 minutes?!" Man, I've been known to take an entire day trying to decide what to buy! Well, an hour later that day, I had sneakers but still couldn't make up my mind about shorts and a top. I decided to have mercy on him and told him I'd go back alone, so he wouldn't have to wait anymore. But needless to say, he learned a very valuable lesson that day! ;)

Hehe. This post sure made me laugh. Very true. I never try to take guys shopping---heck, I don't take women either, because I'd prefer to shop alone. I don't want anyone to suffer through the experience because of me!

Okay I have to tell you that I hate shopping and I have been asked when my balls are going to drop but I have proof I am a women just look at my stretchmarks on my stomach from my son...battle wounds that I gladly display

I love to buy shoes...heels to be specific. They just sit there and see how great they make my legs look and yes, I will probably pay for it when I get older...wearing heels will do that to a women eventually. But right now...Hello, gotta have those shoes. woo!

And I love a good bargain as muxh as anyone...I don't like to haggle price. If it's doesn't have a tag...I ask and if it's outragious over priceed...screw it. I don't deal with people that change prices at a moments notice or lie to me. that alone tells me he or she is not honest. And I don't do business with dishonest shop keepers.

Kiddo you have met the exception to the rule with myself and my dear husband. He loves to shop, lives to shop. I'd rather get a root canal. Interesting. I love this posting though. It's a hoot. Good job.

I don't think I particularly love shopping unless I'm on drugs or really depressed - and then I actually look around and "impulse buy" something I actually needed but forgot or missed before in the rush to just get stuff (like cigarettes) and get out of (usually stuffy) shops. And you know what, I just CANNOT understand this weird shoe fixation (almost a fetish) that women talk about with such pride. It's mildly disturbing and mostly annoying. And heels are just stupid because they make me feel unbalanced and unnatural. Maybe I'm not "normal" but I only have stuff I actually use all the time and I like it all because - well, why get something you don't really use or like anyway? And nobody can possibly like everything, can they? Maybe I'm just in a rotten mood. Working all day and dealing with women gushing about shoes and clothes can really piss me off.

new clothes = desi clothes.although why i would need desi clothes anywhere besides Pakistan is wayyy beyond me. but whatever. I get new clothes which make me feel pretty. so they can just do their magiccc

About Me; Master of the Universe in Training

Some people feel the rain, others just get wet.
As for me...either ways, I don't bother owning a rain coat.
Live the life you love, love the life you live....and make sure you have money saved up for therapy just in case.