The altruistic art of lifting about half of the money from each of our wallets every year and spending it with prudence, enlightenment and efficiency.

40% of our fellow adults are gleefully satisfied with the benevolent outcomes of this arrangement. You know this because when it’s election day, they don’t vote.

“I’m not going to vote, I hate politics.”

“Really? That’s amazing, I thought you loved politics. When I reach over the table and grab one fry from your plate you throw a complete conniption. But every year when your politicians take, in total, more than half of your hard-earned money, you don’t vote to do a thing about it. So I think you secretly love having a bunch of rich, old white men take your money and do whatever they want with it, no matter how demeaning and controlling their laws are to your life and to the lives of the people you love. That's quite a fetish you've got going on there, I hadn’t realized you were such a political submissive.”

Republican: This is what Jesus would want! Bombings, oil pipelines, war, huge deficits...surely God agrees with the PNAC mission statement for America to dominate the world!

Democrat: If Jesus were alive today, he would be a Democrat, because He was incapable of sin, just like all Democrats are! We Democrats exist solely oppose the evil, satanist Nazithuglikkkanazis, just like Jesus!

The art of making it look like you are actually helping those that your represent in a government organization while actually creating more problems and blaming them on other politiicans so you can get re-elected.