Winston wrote:There's something I don't get about marriage. How are you supposed to be horny for the same person everyday for the rest of your life?

Marriage is for companionship. Ppl will eventually stop bo*nking, usually between years 3 and 7. Thus, in the end ... P4P but stay with a wife, for friendship. That's the best long term arrangement which a person can pull off esp in an age of instant communication where it's easy for ppl to interfere with one another's life.

In the past, the idea of a mistress was doable, however, since that adds a 3rd party dynamic to a happy household, I wouldn't want a mistress around, if I have a primary spouse. I'd rather bo*nk an esc@rt but then, discuss adding a new roof, fixing the car, taking a class in finance, etc, with the wife.

Many years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

Buying a used car that depreciates without insurance(prenup) knowing that 70% chance you will be in a life damaging major accident. I would rather lease a car ( have a different gf every couple of years) or even better rent exciting new cars every day (be a playboy) and even drive a Tesla for next to nothing ( date an overseas hottie while spending $2 on a dinner date)

jamesbond wrote:Tom Leykis says, women are like cars. When they are brand new they look great! As they get older, they start to get rust, need repair and break down.

In other words, as a car ages, it loses it's appeal, just like women do!

Cars are not a good metaphor, as there are numerous well-maintained classics from the 60s and 70s, which look better and better, by the passing year. If I had the time to waste, doing my own maintenance, I wouldn't mind owning a '67 GTO.

Women are more like the average bottle of milk, once you hit the expiration, it's all downhill from there

Many years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

The key flaw in marriage is that you cannot promise to love one person forever. People change and couples can grow apart. Theres no guarantee that you will love your partner next year. So you cannot make such a promise that you can't keep. It would be like promising to only love eating pizza everyday for the rest of your life. You can't promise that. Yet marriage requires a lifelong promise and commitment. It's not reasonable or realistic.

Therefore in that sense, marriage doesn't make sense and is an extreme promise that can't be kept. Have you thought about this?

But then again, individuality is something recent. For thousands of years, people had no individual mind. They thought collectively as a group and family and simply accepted their role and duty without question or argument. So marriage was set up with this in mind.

Btw in China I heard that in divorce, the man gets to keep everything. The laws there do not protect women. Chinese women there told me that. I wonder what the anti-male USA has to say about that. Lol

Winston wrote:...Btw in China I heard that in divorce, the man gets to keep everything. The laws there do not protect women. Chinese women there told me that. I wonder what the anti-male USA has to say about that. Lol

Yes and No, the new Chinese law, quite similar to Thai law, protects the original OWNER of real estate regardless the gender in case of divorce.

This means, if you have a house, free of debts, registered in your name BEFORE marriage, it will belong to you 100 percent after divorce.
This new law was confirmed by the Supreme Court in 2011 to the displeasure of feminists.

Sept. 21, 2011
.....Last month, the country's Supreme Court rolled out a new interpretation of China's Marriage Law that changes the way property disputes are handled after a divorce. Since then, couples across China have been thinking more seriously about tying the knot: in the southwest city of Chongqing alone, marriage registrations fell by 30% in the weeks after the changes were made.

Under the newly redefined law, which took effect on Aug. 13, any property that was purchased before a marriage will no longer be up for negotiation after a divorce; it will belong solely to who bought it or whose name is on the deed. Also, if a house or apartment was purchased by the parents of either the bride or groom, it will revert to that person only, instead of being split between the couple.

newlife wrote:not to offend anyone, but do you think getting married is the best route to take in life? or maybe just stick to banging sluts and taking your chances with stds?

i'm married to a girl and it is not fun dealing with her insane jealousy. i can't even leave my apartment without her going nuts. never had to deal with that when i was single and free. i feel like i'm chained to the wall now. it's no fun anymore. i don't even have sex with her much anymore because, sexually, she bores me.

i used to just hit up prostitutes all the time. i loved the variety! it's no strings attached fun. i caught quite a few nasty stds and it all scared me a bit. so i decided the time was right for a "nice" virgin girl with a clean v****a.

upside of the whole thing is i don't have to wear condoms nor do i have to worry about stds or aids. downside is i have no freedom to screw whoever i want anymore. i also dont get much sex because it's so damn boring.

what do you think? is marriage the wrong way?

Is married life the best way to live? Well, I'm a Christian, so the choices are marriage and celibacy. Celibacy is a more noble way to go, especially for missionary types like St. Paul who could travel around preaching without being tied down with a family, with no family members for the persecutors to torment in front of him and that sort of thing. But next to that, I'd say married life is the best.

It sounds to me like you might have gotten jaded with exploits with prostitutes to where normal sex doesn't do it for you anymore. Maybe you need to readjust your tastes somehow. I've been married for 15 years, and even the most boring sex is still pretty fun.

My wife isn't particularly jealous, but she knows I've never slept with prostitutes. Your wife might have reason to be jealous if you are craving sex with different women to make things exciting for you.

If you want to go out, take your wife out. If you are bored with sex, maybe you could experiment a bit with your own wife. But some rope and a blindfold or a Batman and Catwoman costume and case her around, or something else that floats your boat and play with her. You could also think of how you'd like your wife to be in the bedroom and tell her what you like or try to 'train her' to gradually move in the direction of what you want.

Being married is good for me. I get guilt-free sex with no STDs. And my wife is a great cook. I wouldn't keep a house as clean if I lived alone. And it's kind of lonely living alone, eating alone at restaurants, going out to the mall alone, watching all the couples.

Winston wrote:There's something I don't get about marriage. How are you supposed to be horny for the same person everyday for the rest of your life?

Some of them are fine if you are only horny for them three times a week, twice a week, once a month or whatever.

I've been married over 15 years and I still want to have sex with my wife. The desire doesn't just go away because I've had sex with her before.

I think it would be kind of lame to go out to some bar and try lines on girls and try to pick them up for sex, and go home empty-handed (no pun intended) and spend all that time and effort to woo new girls, when you could get married and just have sex with your own wife.

Winston wrote:The key flaw in marriage is that you cannot promise to love one person forever. People change and couples can grow apart. Theres no guarantee that you will love your partner next year. So you cannot make such a promise that you can't keep. It would be like promising to only love eating pizza everyday for the rest of your life. You can't promise that. Yet marriage requires a lifelong promise and commitment. It's not reasonable or realistic.

You mention China in your post. In traditional Chinese thought, is marriage about being in love. You marry your wife and take on the responsibility to stay married to her.

How long have you known your mom. Do you still love your mom? Do you anticipate a time when you won't love your mom? That's not romantic love, but it's a kind of love.

Western culture idealizes an exciting kind of romantic love. So some people watch Disney movies and think if they get married they have to be 'in love' and they are committing to be 'in love' forever, thinking that means some kind of butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling that people get with a new relationship.

I love my wife, but I don't get the feel like I'm going to throw up when around her, fortunately. I remember barely being able to eat around a girl when I was young. That wasn't a very mature kind of love.

I'm not afraid that I'm suddenly going to leave my wife. I made a commitment to take her as my wife. If our relationship has problems and if I didn't love her anymore, I'd know I'd need to repent of that and also work on our relationship, not divorce her. And I don't think we'd ever be condemned to a loveless marriage for the rest of our lives. By God's grace, we are very capable of loving each other. So if we went through a dry spell, we'd have to just get past it.

It's good to feel save in a relationship, not to be in the relationship until one of you starts to experience some waning emotions. The relationship shouldn't be based on some kind of feeling of excitement that is going to fade when the relationship is no longer brand new. There are other forms of love that are deeper and fulfilling in other ways.

Btw in China I heard that in divorce, the man gets to keep everything. The laws there do not protect women. Chinese women there told me that. I wonder what the anti-male USA has to say about that. Lol

I was just looking at some stats that talked about China's relatively high divorce rates, 30 or 40 something percent in large cities, I think. I wonder why women divorce there if they don't get the cash and prizes the courts there give out. Maybe they earn enough money there. Divorces need to be hard to come by. Legal systems shouldn't be designed to make them easy.

Btw, does China give women the kids and make the men pay child support?