Good sports: Teaching kids to play the right way

Friday

Worried that your kids aren't learning good sportsmanship? Here's what you can do.

Albert Pujols stands lingering in the batter’s box after hitting what he thinks will be a home run.

When it becomes clear the ball he is admiring won’t be leaving the park, Pujols, the St. Louis Cardinals’ star first baseman, begins to leg it out, only to be thrown out easily at second base.

It’s a poor display of hustle from one of the most respected players in baseball, setting a bad example for every youth league player who likes to mimic Pujols’ every move.

Liz Finney, however, doesn’t worry that her kids are being negatively influenced when they witness all-star athletes dogging it on the field.

“For us, these are times to use it as an example of how not to act and explain how they should act,” she said.

While trash-talking, showboating and lollygagging are common in professional sports, sportsmanship still matters in the youth arena where coaches and parents want their kids to play the game the right way. (See below for tips parents can use.)

“My players are not allowed to talk to the umpires. If there’s a strikeout, they turn around and hustle right back to the dugout,” said Tony Mattera, who has coached youth baseball for 18 years.

Mattera, of Springfield, said there are many opportunities in every game for a player to choose to react positively or negatively. He says it’s important to keep tabs on his kids’ attitudes, along with their grades and how they handle responsibility, because they all go into making a better ballplayer.

Mattera coaches the Bulldogs, a 10-year-old traveling team, but is also a long-time coach of the Springfield Statesmen, a competitive-league team for high school-age players. In his experience, the younger kids are much easier to mold, while the older ones are more likely to emulate what they see on TV.

“They watch the home run derby, and the next practice after that you’ll see a lot of kids with their hats turned sideways,” he said of the cockeyed style preferred by sluggers during the All-Star competition.

At whatever age, he insists that the brim be positioned toward the front.

No one said life is fair

When it comes to good sportsmanship, a coach can only control half of what goes on. Sometimes, a coach competes against a team whose coach is less concerned about teaching fair play to his or her athletes.

Mattera has witnessed his share of unethical behavior on the field. He recalled a situation when a team from Chicago had a fast runner on third base and a slower guy on second.

“They got a timeout in and the players came over to talk with the coach, and when they went back to the bases they switched places,” Mattera said, adding that he caught their ruse and called them on it.

Other teams will teach their kids to cut in front of the bag by a few feet when circling the bases to reduce the distance to home plate. Some coaches justify this as gamesmanship, although Mattera considers it bush league.

The extent to which some coaches will go to win goes well beyond bad sportsmanship — it’s sometimes fraudulent.

The Bulldogs travel to tournaments in Champaign and St. Louis, often facing teams they’ve never seen before. To ensure no one is using ineligible players or picking up ringers, most organizers require that each player produce a birth certificate. Mattera recalled one such tournament where a team had forged a birth certificate because one of its players was too old to compete at that level, breaching an ethical line.

“That team couldn’t get in a tournament anywhere. In fact, that team folded,” he said.

Mostly OK

Paul Marconi has been the director for the YMCA’s youth soccer league for four years. The former collegiate player and high school coach is overseeing close to 2,100 players in the spring season. Each of the 148 teams comes with a coach or two, dozens of parents and guardians, and countless family members.

Just by sheer numbers that would seem to spell trouble, yet Marconi said there are surprisingly few bad apples when it comes to sportsmanship.

“Very rarely do we have problems with coaches. Or parents, for that matter,” he said.

In 490 games last season, only 10 yellow cards were issued and zero red cards. (A yellow card is issued as a caution to a player or coach who exhibits un-sportsmanlike behavior. A red card is given for more serious or repeat offenses and results in dismissal from the game.)

Marconi’s volunteer referees have told him that 95 percent of the games they work are enjoyable.

“It’s the other 5 percent that make that Gatorade and hot dog they get for compensation just not worth it,” he said.

The worst incident Marconi can recall is when it took four referees to remove a belligerent coach from the field.

The best incident occurred when a coach asked the referee not to call offsides on an opposing player who had Down syndrome, in hopes that the boy could score a goal.

“That is just about the top of the heap when it comes to good sportsmanship. That coach didn’t care if he won or lost the game if he could give that kid a chance to score,” he said.

Everyone’s responsibility

Marconi begins each season with a coaches meeting where he spells out what is expected in terms of proper behavior toward referees and opponents. Coaches are expected to relay this information to their players and families.

If sportsmanship on the soccer pitch has improved over the years, Marconi attributes it mainly to an increased understanding of the game. Parents from a previous generation, who grew up playing baseball and basketball exclusively, may have had trouble interpreting soccer’s rules and culture, leading to conflicts. A good number of today’s young parents have played the game and know what to expect.

While coaches and league organizers play an important role in demanding good sportsmanship, a key role of instilling those values still falls to the parents.

Finney has three boys and one girl involved in various sports throughout the year. She appreciates the health benefits her kids are getting, as well as the camaraderie and spirit of competition it builds. Finney also said it provides her children an incentive to maintain their grades, a condition of their participation.

Kathy Zanger of Springfield also has four sports-loving children. The advice she gives them on sportsmanship could translate to the highest levels of competition.

“I have always told my kids to let your actions speak louder than words. Go out and play the game with your head high and you’ll do fine. Have fun, hustle, listen to their coach and have a good attitude,” she said.

Dan Naumovich is a freelance writer and business copywriter. He can be reached at dan@naumo.com.

What parents can do

Most people involved in youth sports are committed to providing a safe and enjoyable activity for their players.

But what if it stops being fun because of someone’s bad behavior? Here are few ways a parent can step up and restore order:

1. What if your child is being a poor sport?

Take matters into your own hands. Liz Finney said that if it came to it, she’d have no problem yanking one of her kids from a game if they went over the behavioral line.
For lesser offenses, a parent can talk to the child after the game or ask the coach to address the issue.

2. What if a fan is being a poor sport?

Ask someone else to handle it. A referee or umpire will call timeout and address an unruly fan if the person’s behavior disrupts the game. If the umpire doesn’t notice, find a league representative at the park or field who can handle complaints. Usually, they have the authority to eject an unruly fan from the premises if the situation can’t be resolved.

3. What if an opposing coach or team is being a poor sport?

Contact the league president. A single act of bad sportsmanship can usually be handled immediately, but if an entire team is flouting the rules and razzing the opponents, the problem probably runs too deep to address on the field. The league president can investigate and determine what disciplinary steps need to be taken.

Another option is to contact the team’s sponsor and let the sponsor know that its good name is being tarnished by bad sportsmanship.

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