Sunday, March 13, 2011

Hello all! So as most of you know from facebook, I had my scans March 9th, and it was completely negative, making it a full year in remission. BUT, I had my post Allo vaccinations before I left NYC on Thursday, (5- 3 in one arm, 2 in the other) and I woke up Friday running terribly high fevers (highest got to 102.9), body aches, chills, the works. So, I have been taking Tylenol around the clock, and by last night, the Tylenol wasnt holding my fevers anymore. I thought this was probably just my immune system reacting to the vaccinations, but I took a look at my arm, and there is a red, hard, area about the size of a baseball spot on my arm that was very hot and painful. So, I called the docs on call in NYC and she was suspicious of cellulitis in my arm, since my fevers werent so low grade. So now, Im on antibiotics and it seems to be helping. Some of the redness is going away.

So, now Im completely and totally freaked out. I was planning on getting my feet back in the water and maybe start working again. But I just dont know if its a good idea. Have these vaccines screwed up my immune system? Why was I so suseptible to infection? Is my next scan going to show something because of these vaccines? Have they freaked my system out?

Im just reminded of laying in the hospital bed at Vanderbilt, fever ablazing, and thinking that was the beginning of the end. Fevers scare me to no end, and so does being sick. Ive been well for a year now,and then this happens. I know it seems insignificant to some of you, but I guess its some sort of PTSD. I have gone back and forth as to wether to fill out the application to my old job, or just wait. Wait for a little longer just to make sure everything is ok after this vaccination/cellulitis scare. I dont know. Im afraid of the cancer coming back again, and if I do go back to work, Ill be dropped from disability, and my insurance through the state, what will I do? This is my main concern about going back to work. I have to have money. Disability isnt much, but its something. I would probably have to go back through the same process that takes about 6 months to get your first check. My doctors want me to go back to work. I just dont know that Im ready.