Many temporarily unrequited lovers could be hearing this plaint come Saturday.

Hundreds of Britons are being urged to attend what is being branded as Europe's first "Masturbate-a-thon", a leading reproductive healthcare charity said on Friday.

Marie Stopes International, which is hosting the event with HIV/AIDS charity the Terrence Higgins Trust, said it expected up to 200 people to attend the sponsored masturbation session in Clerkenwell, central London, on Saturday.

"It is a bit of a publicity stunt but we hope it will raise awareness," a Marie Stopes spokeswoman told Reuters.
I have to admire their nerve, but I wonder at the, um, logistics.

Participants, who have to be over 18, can bring any aids they need and can take part in four different rooms -- a comfort area, a mixed area, along with men and women only areas.

However, the rules on the event's Web site states there can be no touching of other participants nor are people allowed to fake orgasms.How do they propose to regulate that? Sorry, guys, but in the end you can't really know for sure.

"The amount you raise will be determined by how many minutes you masturbate and/or how many orgasms you achieve," the Web site said....

...Similar events have been staged in San Francisco for the last six years raising $25,000 (13,000 pounds) for women's health initiatives and HIV prevention.
You know, if they just made this concept into a porn flick, they'd probably raise 100 times that.

No individual licensed by a health regulatory board shall assist with or perform any intervening medical technology, whether in vivo or in vitro, for or on an unmarried woman that completely or partially replaces sexual intercourse as the means of conception, including, but not limited to, artifical insemination by donor, cryopreservation of gametes and embryos, invitro fertilization, embryo transfer, gamete intrafallopian tube transfer, and low tubal ovum transfer.

This bill was prefiled on Jan 2nd by R.G. Marshall. Just from the brief info it seems to be along the same lines as the "unauthorized reproduction" bill, that was introduced in Indiana this past October. ::::warning PDF link::: The obvious intent is to bar unmarried women from becoming pregnant by artificial means. The bill will be offered Jan. 11th, so perhaps more detail will be available soon.

Stuart Lawley, chairman of the ICM Registry, could not be immediately reached for comment. In an interview last year, Lawley said that .xxx domain names would cost around $75 and come with no restrictions except that any sexually explicit content feature only adults. "Apart from child pornography, which is completely illegal, we're really not in the content-monitoring business," Lawley said.

The ICM Registry plans to handle the technical aspects of running the master database of .xxx sex sites. A second, nonprofit organization called the International Foundation For Online Responsibility will be in charge of setting the rules for .xxx. It's intended to have a seven-person board of directors, including a child advocacy advocate, a free-expression aficionado and someone from the adult entertainment industry.

I'm kind of ambivalent about pornography. On the one hand, it seems 80-90% of it is all about objectifying women. (Yes, I've been in a porn shop. Yes, it was good for a few chuckles. No, I didn't buy anything ... though the football-sized vibrator would've been a nice curiosity piece for the lobby at the office.) On the other hand, I feel that the more seed spilled in excitement over a website means the less seed spotting some guy's shorts as he follows me down the sidewalk, hands in pockets. In other words, I see some merit to the idea that porn helps keep the dogs off the streets.

But I have to object to the $75 registration fee. Don't they know what kind of dough these pimps are making? A few years ago, I moved into a town right when they published a business journal overview of the region. In the video production category, the top company was a porn producer. They were making some $30 million a year. The next company down the list was at something like $1.2 million, and they were catering to the A-list agencies. If mom-and-pop.com has to pay 8 bucks to register their domain, it seems only fair that bighotcocksinaction.xxx should pay $240.

Now let's talk about something this might presage, something we won't like. Let's go back to what Lawley said:

"Apart from child pornography, which is completely illegal, we're really not in the content-monitoring business."

What concerns me is this: If we've set aside a triple-x wasteland of ejaculation-worthy online entertainment, does this mean that we can look forward to thought police for the rest of the web? Is that the real meaning of AOL's slogan "a better internet"? I'm not sure I like the idea of Big Brother deciding whether my content is up to .org snuff.

AN UPPITY WOMAN CAN BE WHATEVER SHE WANTS
Women Are Not Defined by Men
Posted at The Heretik
MADONNA AND WHORE?
Why Do Names Matter?
We All Can Say Madonna and Whore, Madonna or Whore, Madonna is a Whore, Whatever! One thing we can say about one Madonna Louise Ciccone is that we cannot say just one thing. A woman with one name wears many personas: Madonna. Wear the mask, vogue, come on let's vogue, whatever! Madonna! A woman wears a cross and crosses every line in her path: Madonna. Whatever! Cherry picking musical genres, cherrypicking musical youngblood cherries Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera. Whatever. Madonna!

A WOMAN DEFINES HERSELF!
F**k, no, F**k Off Whoever Gets in Her Way: Madonna!
As a concept, the Christian Madonna has been hailed and derided. Mother of God and handmaiden! Opposites non attractive to some, no matter to others. Woman as mother of god elevates woman to level of greatest respect in a world that shows little respect to those without a title. Handmaiden of the Lord makes a woman a servant in a master's house. Madonna!

KILL BILL, ONE AND TWO
Consider Bill Clinton, if only for a moment. Clinton of the blowjob and the dress, Clinton of the scandal and the mess. The Feminist Curse or Consort to the Queen? What does it mean when a man is defined not by what he does, but by what is done to him? Is this question defined by the famous is? Is any sex consensual? Can a woman choose to be a whore? Can a queen rule from a prison cell?

What does it mean when a blowjob almost blows a Presidency away? Without intent to belittle the matter and who did what to whom and the power equation, who was on their knees first and who ended up on their knees later? And who used blowjobs to blow smoke up our collective asses?

Bill Clinton does not define the women he most is attached to in history. They define him. The putative persona of whore Lewinsky defines Clinton as pig, the elevated persona of madonna and queen Hillary defines him as tool for her agenda. Make no mistake. Clinton was and is attacked for what his wife believes.

A WOMAN CAN BE EVERYTHING SHE WANTS
Where Men Are Doomed to Certainty, Women See a World of Choices

Why does The Heretik love Uppity Women? Not to define, but only to say this. Women are natural heretiks, ever pointing out what does not fit, what does not sit right in the world of stand up guys. Women admit possibility. Possiblility is the greatest heresy in a certain world.

Recently The Heretik has come to know Chalicechiq a wise woman who admits more possiblity than most. Her blog is entitled Light. Do not so easily pass up her young wisdom.