Confessions of a food whore and reluctant fan of Antonio Banderas. I realize that's sickening. This blog does not seek to educate, only to destroy. I mean only to educate people about Uranus.

June 6, 2002

Baby-Killers, Amy Brown, Thieving Rat Bastards and Puppies

Baby-Killers, Amy Brown, Thieving Rat Bastards and Puppies

E-mail from me to Paul: I am sitting at my desk reading a book under my stuffed puppy.E-mail from Paul to me: I am sitting at my desk.

So this chick we all knew from UC Santa Cruz who had her baby in her dorm room then killed it got community service as her punishment. That's fucking lovely. No really it is. If you get caught smoking pot, you get thrown in jail. If you pay less than you should in taxes you get thrown in jail. But if you kill your baby... pick up garbage along the freeway for awhile and your slate is clean. California judges should be up there on my list of people I hate.

I want like 40 prints from this artist Amy Brown. Although I only have the lighter, good fairy drawings in my apartment, some of the darker, evil fairy ones look pretty bad ass too.

I called my cell earlier to check my voicemail and it takes something like 14 rings to switch to voicemail. What kind of idiots designed this voicemail system?? I can't even get my friends to stay on the phone with me for longer than 3 minutes, much less expect them to listen to my phone ring for 5. Supposedly MCI Wordcom is getting out of the cell phone business THANK GOD. I say that last bit because MCI Worldcom are a bunch of thieving RAT BASTARDS. I got my cell phone two years ago supposedly "at a deal" because Mike used to work there and instead I ended up paying triple each month what I would have been had I been with ANY OTHER SERVICE PROVIDER. I know this for a fact. I did the research. But I stayed with Worldcom because the dickheads would fuck my bill up (the bill they always send 4 months late then disconnect my phone if I don't pay the bill within 2 business days of receiving it) and I'd have to wait for them to resolve it. Plus like 90 people know my cell number and I don't have theirs so if I changed it I would have been removing all possibility for contact. Again, I HATE MCI THOSE THIEVING RAT BASTARDS. Their customer service employees were the worst I have ever had the misfortune to deal with. Not only did every single one I speak to over the course of two years have a combined IQ of 23, they were also rude as hell. One idiot had the nerve to tell me to just pay the bill they messed up on, simply because no one at her company was ever going to remove the extra charges (which they later did). I told her I had a higher chance of winning the Olympic Gold in the Men's Pommelhorse event than Worldcom did of me ever paying that bill. I'm glad your stock is worth 1.40 today and falling MUHAHAHAHAHA. They're right up there on my list of people I hate:

I'm sorry, that was uncalled for. I'm in a cranky mood because I'm in the throes of a really bad allergy attack. My eyes are burning, my face is itchy and my nose is stuffy. I can't take allergy medicine because even non-drowsy ones make me drowsy, so I'm just sitting here. Itchy.

Anyway, Geo and I have decided to make lemonade out of lemons so since we're getting kicked out of our apartment we're going to find a new one that takes pets. Then we're going to get two puppies, I don't want to buy only one because I don't want any dog I get to be lonely. So, one for each of us it is!! Mine will be the cuter one. Just kidding. Anyway, we were thinking of getting beagles and Mike got upset because he says we should pick a dog up from the pound. The thing is, as humanitarian as that is... why would you get a dog you didn't want just to save its life? Especially if you live in an apartment. Like that's a nice thing to do and all, more power to you. But at the risk of sounding like a 5-year-old, I WANT PUPPIES. I WANT CUTE PUPPIES. I'm going to look at shelters and call animal rescue places and all but in the end if I can't find any I like I'm going to a breeder. So sue me. Hey, I should call that woman we got Nookie from. I think she mainly rescues puppies.

The title of this post sounds like a demented version of the Sound of Music song.