When a man loves a woman, he loses a governorship

When a man loves a woman Can’t keep his mind on nothin’ else He’d trade the world For a good thing he’s found If she is bad, he can’t see it She can do no wrong Turn his back on his best friend If he puts her down When a man loves a woman Spend his very last dime Trying to hold on to what he needs He’d give up all his comforts And sleep out in the rain If she said that’s the way It ought to be— Percy Sledge

Eve. Delilah. Cleopatra. Elizabeth Taylor. Angelina Jolie.

When you think of famous temptresses the name Rebekah Caldwell Mason will not come to mind to anyone outside the state of Alabama. But just as these other famous seductresses were able to do, Mason seems to have charmed our septuagenarian governor right out of office.

Gov. Robert Bentley clearly (and rather pathetically) loved a woman (who happened to be his top political adviser) and could not keep his mind on nothin’ else, except making sure his Viagra shipments made their way to the governor’s mansion.

He did turn his back on his best friend (former head of Alabama Law Enforcement Agency Spencer Collier) when he put her down … or at least when Collier told him he really needed to break up with her because using state funds to carry on an affair with his married boo could become a crime. Bentley told his friend (who incidentally was Alabama’s top law enforcement official at the time) he would dump her but he didn’t. He supposedly called him up and said he just couldn’t because he was “madly in love with her.”

Bentley could not resist Eve’s sinful fruit. Though it was not the apple in this case, as we all know our Eve skillfully used the melons our governor so famously loved to hold.

Bentley fired Collier. And Collier repaid the favor by spilling the beans. Bentley divorced his wife, Dianne, who he had been married to for almost 50 years.

And so now, after a year of dealing with secret tapes and various convenient political appointments, it seems like America’s unsexiest sex scandal may be coming to a close.

Rumors are swirling in Montgomery that Bentley will be resigning from office in the coming weeks to avoid being impeached. There are numerous investigations that are reportedly still ongoing by the Attorney General’s office, the Alabama Ethics Commission and the House Judiciary Committee into whether he used state funds to facilitate and/or cover up his inappropriate relationship with Mason.

Rep. Ed Henry, R-Hartselle, who has led the effort to impeach the Luv Guv, told al.com earlier this week that even if the governor stepped down, he expected the Alabama Ethics Commission to pursue criminal charges against him.

Even as these investigations were underway, Bentley took Mason and her husband (arguably the only man more pathetic than the Lovernor) to Trump’s inauguration.

That woman truly is something else.

In a small way I feel sorry for the Guv. I genuinely believe he was so infatuated with Mason, he just lost his damn mind. And he was such an easy target. Goofy and old, the former dermatologist married young and spent all day looking at irregularly shaped moles and popping pimples. Even one ounce of female attention would have been difficult to resist. And clearly it was.

It’s hard to believe Rebekah Mason, a sophisticated woman 30 years his junior who was a former beauty queen and TV journalist, had really found her soulmate in Bentley. It seems far more likely she fell in love with the power and the way she became what some described as the “de facto governor.” Not to mention the hefty salary she was paid by some shady fund. Oh, and her husband got a pretty sweet gig and salary out of this as well.

You have to wonder now when Bentley sits all alone in the mansion at night if he still thinks she’s worth it. All signs point to yes. He is probably doodling hearts and “Mrs. Rebekah Bentley” on his official stationery to this day.

If she plays him for a fool, he’s the last one to know, loving eyes can’t ever see.

But it will be interesting to see if he stays just as lovesick as this continues to play out. He will no doubt use close to his “very last dime” in legal fees related to fighting this. And as he most likely loses the office he described as the “greatest honor of his life” and potentially his freedom, will he still think she’s the “good thing’s he’s found.”

About The Author

Ashley Trice is the editor and publisher of Lagniappe Weekly, which she co-founded with fellow publisher Rob Holbert in July 2002. Lagniappe has steadily grown from a 5,000 circulation biweekly into the 30,000 weekly newspaper it is today.
Originally from Jackson, Alabama, she graduated cum laude from the University of South Alabama in 2000 with a BA in communications and did some post graduate work at the University of Texas. She was in the 2011 class of Mobile Bay Monthly’s 40 Under 40. She is the recipient of the 2003 Award for Excellence in In-Depth Reporting by the Mobile Press Club and for Humorous Commentary by the Society of Professional Journalists in 2010 and 2018. In 2015, she won a national writing award presented by the Association of Alternative Newsmedia for “Best Column.” She won the Alabama Press Association Award for Best Editorial Column in 2017 and for Best Humor Column in 2018.
She is married to Frank Trice and they live in Midtown with their children Anders and Ellen, and dog Mattie.