August 21, 2008

New Olympic Sports That I Would Like To See

Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. I know you’re all heartbroken. I haven’t had frequent access to a computer for a while (my laptop fried it’s motherboard), but here’s a short post to make up for it for a little while:

let’s face it, the olympics are awesome, but who really wants to see eleven trillion synchronized diving events? i say we get rid of a few of those and add at least a couple from the following list of things that i thought of while at work instead of being productive.

– ultimate frisbee — because then i could tell everyone i’m training for the olympics during pick up games

– ashbourne royal shrovetide football — look it up. its one of the best sports you’ve never heard of.

– the backwards 100m dash — it would be EPIC. let’s see usain bolt prance around after looking like an idiot for 100 meters.

– backwards 100m hurdles — hilarity would most definitely ensue.

– beer pong — it’s the best of the beerfest events, so the real olympics should just adopt it

– tethercat — it’s just like tetherball, but with an angry, wounded cat tied to a string. trained athletes punching a cat? sign me up!

– tug of war — not really all that crazy, but come on, you know you’d watch.

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“competitive lying to small children — another sport i would dominate”

AHAHAHAHAHA! ROFLZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How about a “laughing contest”? You could go to both extremes:
1) see who will be the LAST to laugh while confronted by a stand-up comedian. or,
2) see who can laugh the longest and hardest (genuinely – which would be rated by judges).