So it turns out Neanderthals were pale, freckled redheads with O blood, had a gift for gab and a fondness for bone marrow. Oh boy, like Mrs. Chief needed more ammunition to bust my balls.

This information is a result of new discoveries recently in Spain reported in the Telegraph, but it’s not entirely new info. Previous studies have shown there were ginger Neanderthals, too. Unfortunately, I think the reporter for the Telegraph made an error, at least I hope it was his error. See if anything here sets off an alarm for you:

The report, published in BMC Evolutionary Biology, concludes that: “These results suggest the genetic change responsible for the O blood group in humans predates the human and Neanderthal divergence” but came “after humans separated from their common ancestor … chimpanzees.”

I’d like to read what was replaced with “…”, wouldn’t you? Any guesses what that was? Perhaps “they share with”, or “which is also the ancestor of”. Now it’s possible human and chimp ancestors got it on, but humans didn’t come from chimps, and that’s something that commonly gets confused by people ignorant of evolution, like for instance every Creationist.

Anyway, I do find it amusing that Neanderthals were gingers, or should we now call them “Gingerthals”? The study suggests the ginger traits manifested before the human and neanderthal splits in the branch, but what if they didn’t? Maybe it was that ginger prejudice we still see today that drove early humans to dispatch the Gingerthals and ginger traits manifested independently in humans, or perhaps our ancestors couldn’t resist those ginger girls and, well, that’s how we got the magical MC1R ginger gene.

Whether Lindsey is a lesbian or not doesn’t matter. I’m sure she wouldn’t want you anyway, Mr. Anonymous.

The “problem” with lesbians is they’re off the market for us straight guys, but like I said to our anonymous friend, the “problem” assumes that you’d have a shot otherwise, and generally those who see a “problem” would never have a shot in hell anyway.