Divine Sealing (Genesis) review

"Its all Masters’ fault. Let me explain…
"

Its all Masters’ fault. Let me explain…

One night, while talking to Marc, he suggested he attempt to finish every shoot-em’-up title the Genesis has to offer. While helping compile the long list, we obviously traded comments on past experiences we’d had. Somewhere, amidst the list, Marc mentioned one Divine Sealing. Having never heard of this title, I asked about it – all I remember were the words ‘naked’ and ‘girls’…

So, facing the title screen of this Japanese only shooter, I was mildly surprised to find it gave nothing away. On with the game then, I thought – those girls must be somewhere. The next few screens gave me hope – a goddess like girl sporting a few choice clothes spouted intangible Japanese symbols at me – but sadly, no nudity.

Into the action I finally went, recoiling at the hideous backgrounds. I had no time to be distracted though as huge bees swarmed towards me relentlessly. Bugs crawled around the screen hindering my sight, one after another. Power-ups were strangely sparse, yet luckily so were enemy bullets. Soon I had the boss creature in my sight and only a few seconds and a light spray of fire held me back.

The cut scene brought me back to my senses. The same goddess from before was back with her Japanese again, but this time was she removing her bra? Yes, she is. Bless you Marc. Nipples after one level – get me back to the action.

Straight into level two with more optimism this time. What treat awaits me on completion of this level I wondered? Same enemies again, this time they shoot back. Not too much of a problem, I laughed as I weaved carefully between the enemies offerings. Another boss came and went without too much problem.

A beautiful green haired girl this time and clothing is scarce to begin with. This time as well as an ample show of breasts, there is full nudity to be had. Two or three poses were spent before any sign of action returned. Now I was wondering what the next girl could do to better that.

Just as the next level started, a through ran through my mind. This is a shooter, not some cheap excuse to look at cartoon females undressing! It was then, in the next couple of minutes that the horrible truth hit me. This game is terrible! Again the same foes were coming at me, guns blazing – yet this time some formations crossed giving you twice as many bad guys on screen. I had powered up a couple of times all told, with a pointless rear gun that never sees any action from one wave to the next. The graphics are not impressing me too much either. The large, inanimate beasts just drift on and off the screen with absolutely no interest and ferocity whatsoever. The backgrounds are still unappealing and dull, whatever they are meant to be. Another boss, with its random moving projectiles gets hammered into submission just as sadly as the last.

But another girl appears and my joy is returned. This one is fully clothed in flight gear though… but not for long. Girl sans outfit is again shown through various positions as you ready yourself for the next level, although to my disappointment, she is not as risqué as I was expecting.

Oh no! The game has gone mad. Several formations of enemies are thrown into the mix all hammering me at once. Suddenly my rear gunner is in action (on my ship of course!) but I’m overcome – there is far too many too take in at once. Not being able to see the incoming projectiles due to the clash with those horrible backdrops doesn’t help. I thought graphics clashing had been buried with the Sinclair Spectrum? My poor eyes cannot keep up after ogling all those pictures and alas, I’ll never know how far girl number four would have gone for my triumphs.

Then reality hit me again - this is one of the worst of all the shooters I have ever played on the Genesis – something that is quite a feat indeed. I expect tons of deadly weapons I can unleash over my sad, pathetic enemies. Enemies that come to die in spectacular, varied attacks making me think as well as shoot. Failing this, some nice visuals would be nice. Sadly, neither is available with Divine Sealing. You are just expected to plug through tedious, repetitive levels in hope to see anime girls take off a little more clothing. An experience I won’t be repeating again… Well… maybe once. Damn you Masters!

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