Monday, January 12, 2009

For the win! Esquire on MTV's Bromance

Since witnessing the awesome trainwreck that is the new MTV reality show Bromance, more appropriately titled Douchebag Seeking Douchebag, I've been preparing to unleash a hateful screed bemoaning the recent slate of basic-cable reality show males.

"bro•mance \bro-'man(t)s\ n : (1) the complicated love and affection shared by two straight males, often exhibited through physical acts such as wrestling, playing sports, and half-hugging. Ex: "Shut up, Monica! Chandler and I share a bromance that you'll never understand!"

vb : (1) The act of going to unusual lengths in order to woo a male friend. Ex: "Jeff from accounting hasn't accepted my friend request, so my plan is to bromance him with some Knicks tickets."

proper n : (1) MTV's new reality television show starring The Hills alumnus Brody Jenner as a d-bag man searching for a fellow d-bag man to join his posse of friends, through a process involving intimate chats and outrageous physical challenges, the likes of which manage to achieve a level of unintentional homoeroticism not reached since the Grecian Olympic era of girded loins."