Tagobituary

For every action movie there is a huge death count. For an hour of film, there are countless deaths. Mostly in the wake of the heroes brave struggle against evil.

Sometimes, the hero’s love-interest, trusted friend or family member pays the ultimate price. But what about all of those people who are randomly killed during the movie who aren’t the star? They’re minding their own business. They’re going about their life oblivious to the epic battle raging up ahead. They board a bus or a train unaware the fate of the world hangs in the balance a few blocks again.

What about the guy driving home from work being crushed under falling debris? How about the woman zapped by a laser beam from an alien weapon? How many people are crushed under the weight of a giant, rampaging lizard?

Who writes their stories?

Theodore Robert Melkavich, 39, was killed today when part of the Empire State Building crushed his car as he drove home from his job at a local florist. He is survived by wife Linda and two pet parakeets, Maude and Earl.

Jordan Smith Johnson, 22, was incinerated when a last blast from a retreating alien cruise struck him as he waited to cross the street at the corner of 9th and Lee. He lived alone and has no relatives.

Ruth Barbara Caruso, 14, was crushed under the tail of Godzilla as it went rampaging through central park. She was playing in a sandbox when all of the sudden, the creature emerged, raced through the park, crushing her and 13 other children with its tail. Her parents, Ronald and Gwendolyn were also killed in the attack.