Don't Upset The Herd

Last week, I was watching one of my more favorite movies, Dazed and Confused. I love it because the clothes and the music reminds me of growing up in Richboro, PA.

There was a funny scene in the movie in which one of the characters, Mike, is angry about how he was treated by a bully, Clint, and exacts his revenge. Mike's philosophy is simple: "Look, man, I got it all planned out. Most fights in places like this never get past a punch or two before they're broken up, know what I'm saying? There's almost a natural instinct not to upset the herd. So all I have to do is get in one good punch, play defense and wait."

Mike was wrong, and got his ass kicked by Clint.

So imagine my surprise when at Mulligan's last Friday, someone decides to be Mike.

I'm not sure how it started. It was about 11pm, I was in the back room, shooting pool. My friend Jason is standing next to me, while I am looking at the table and he casually says, "Oh look, a fight."

Jason said it about as casually as someone would say, "Oh look, pretzels."

I turn to look and see two guys, locked together, knocking over tables while some 20-something girl is trying to break it up screaming "That's my husband!" over and over.

Quick segue: Not only do guys get beer muscles, but chicks do too. A 115 pound girl isn't going to stop two guys from fighting, but that still doesn't stop them from getting into the middle of things. My guess? The girl was the reason, somehow, for the fight. I don't have any proof, but 99% of bar fights are over chicks.

The rest of the "herd" is watching this, and I see the one bouncer is rushing towards the two guys, but the crowd just stood there, watching. The two guys were about 8 feet from me, and about 1 second after I process what was going on, I was already in the melee, trying to break it up.

I got in there, bent the one guys fingers back to release his grip, spun him around and put him into a upright half nelson, pulling him away from the other guy. The guy I was holding kept trying to get at the other guy, but he wasn't going anywhere while I had a hold on him.

The other guy fighting was dragged out of the bar by the other bouncer.

I had no idea who started it or why. The crowd was stunned and amused watching the entertainment. After about a minute I released the guy I was holding, who looked like he was young, maybe 22-24, mid length longish black hair, dark rimmed glasses (for friends of mine he looked like a young Charlie B.) and he was upset saying that the other guy spat in his face, for no reason, and he wouldn't put up with it.

We kept trying to calm the kid down, and eventually he did.

I left, leaving the bouncers and bartenders to handle the rest and went back to playing pool.