She’s Intimidating

One of the things I’ve been thinking about the last few times I went to
the Neon Cactus and now that I’m looking at personals again is this:
Some people can be intimidating and not even be trying. The example I
gave Big Joe was to have him look around the bar, think about the women
he might actually approach and try to have a conversation with, then
look again and think about which ones you wish would come talk to you.
My suspicion is that those groups may have some overlap, but for the
most part will be different.

Now
I’m not talking about some women being scary, but rather that some just
seem to have it together, are having a good time, and are very
confident in themselves. Generally these women are also high on the
attractive scale as well. These are the women you figure could have most
any guy in the room that they want, and why would she want me? This
group is typically considered to be "out of one’s league".

There
are the women who are fairly attractive, but seem lost, or lonely, or
just sad. I don’t want to say that these are good "victims" but one
certainly can feel a lot more confident trying to start a conversation
with these types of women rather than the first type. We’ll call these
women "in league".

There will of course be women that one feels
are not to his standard, and as such they can be ignored for the
purpose of this entry. What I find most interesting is that one would
steer clear of that which he desires most for an added comfort level. I
also wonder about the conversations and how they’d differ from
each other, like how the sad lonely woman might drag you down with her,
but whereas the confident, happy woman might make your night magic just
by talking to you.

The other side of this thought is that I am
guessing women see guys much the same way. They see Big Joe as a
strong, happy, confident individual, and steer clear of him, but the
see the poor shy guy in the corner and see an easy mark. So my thought
here is that I can’t change the way people operate, but I can operate
differently myself so as to put myself in the way. I’ve been thinking
about how timid people look, how do sad people show their sadness, how
do people appear lonely, and I haven’t got a whole lot yet. I still
want to use my body language to convey to my friends, hey I’m havin’ a
rockin’ good time, but I want to be inviting to those with a little
less back bone than me. Hmmm.

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One Comment

Hi Will! When I was in highschool, and before I met Ben here at college, I always had to be the one to make the first move. No one wanted to approach me. My friend James told me that its because I’m intimidating. I’m a strong willed person and for some reason this was a turn off I guess. But yeah, most of the time people tend to be chicken shit so if you want to get the girl, you have to suck it up and go after her. And the worst that can happen is they say no. So you move on. There were so many times that I wanted someone to ask me out but they never did. Even after I found out that they liked me. If you want someone, go for it. Chances are they’ll say yes because you might be the only person with balls enough to ask them. Once again, most people are chicken shits lol!
–Pocket