Seventeen-year-old Gossip Girl star Taylor Momsen is not very happy, and blames her parents.

Taylor says: "Everyone's like, 'Wow, why is she upset and why is she so miserable about things? My parents signed me up with Ford [modeling agency] at the age of two. No two-year-old wants to be working, but I had no choice." And: "My whole life, I was in and out of school. I didn't have friends. I was working constantly and I didn't have a real life." Jeez, when you put it that way, it all makes sense. Use all the eyeliner you need, honey. [NYDN, Us, Star Pulse]

Rihanna has been traveling and partying and drinking champagne and lots of other things completely appropriate for a rich twenty-something pop star. [The Sun]

Lindsay Lohan had oral surgery earlier this week — some teeth were removed — and she is not taking any painkillers. My gums are throbbing in sympathy. [Radar Online]

Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp! On the cover of Entertainment Weekly! Gemini power! She says: "We're both not that social. I don't think either one of us goes out of our house, especially in France. We're both locked away." Hey, if I had a lush European mansion, I would be too.[Just Jared]

Perhaps you heard that Demi Lovato called her father from the treatment center; but Demi's rep says "She hasn't spoken to her dad in a long time. He is making false claims." Congratulations, Patrick Lovato! You are the new Michael Lohan. [Showbiz Spy]

Russell Brand says the rumors that he bought Katy Perry a tiger as a wedding gift are untrue: "I'm a vegetarian, you don't give people tigers. It's stupid, it's dangerous. The tiger won't like it." [Daily Express]

John Mayer's rep says of rumor he shagged Giada De Laurentiis: "The claims are absolutely ridiculous." [Daily Express]

Poor Pink. Good Day LA host Jillian Barberie Reynolds Tweeted about Pink's pregnancy — which Pink has not confirmed — with the words "see I CAN keep a secret." That shit is effed up. Jillian tried to take it back, but whatever. [People]

Kristen Bell doesn't want a massive wedding: "I get enough attention as it is on a daily basis from being in this business. I'm not craving that idea of, 'I want to be a princess for the day'. I think I get enough of that. I see enough pictures of myself." [Digital Spy]

Bonus additional awesome Kristen Bell quote: She says that when she worked with Russell Brand on Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and was an infamous womanizer: "I made it really clear from the beginning that I would sock him in the balls if he tried ­anything. So he was intimidated, truth be told." [Contact Music]

Remember when Samantha Ronson's bulldog killed a Maltese? The lady whose dog was attacked is suing for almost a million dollars. [Radar Online]

Breaking: Cruz Beckham and Shiloh Jolie-Pitt own the same T-shirt. What does it mean???? [Radar Online]

Natalie Portman has written a raunchy comedy that folks are calling a female Superbad. Plot: Ttwo very different twentysomething ladies who are unlucky in love decide to throw a party to which each female attendee brings an eligible bachelor. I went to a party like this once, and it didn't go well. The key is to specify that the guys be straight. [LA Times]

Here is Kristen Stewart trying to give a lapdance and swearing like a sailor in a clip from Welcome To The Rileys. [Celebuzz]

Chord Overstreet, the new blond boy on Glee, will not be posing for Playgirl. FYI. [E!]

In other Playgirl news, the publication turned down those Kanye West cock shots that ended up on the web. [E!]

DeVante Swing — lead singer of Jodeci — was arrested at a Subway sandwich shop last weekend for being do drunk he couldn't walk straight. See a picture of him sprawled on the floor at the link. [TMZ]

After serving 8 years in prison, the rapper Shyne has converted to Orthodox Judaism, is studing the Torah in Israel and says: "I naturally stopped using the N-word, I naturally stopped being misogynistic. My connection to God is the water that nourishes who I am and allows me to grow." Is this an appropriate time to yell "challah!" ? [AP]

Hot In Cleveland is still on the air, and the second season will have awesome guest stars: Mary Tyler Moore, Illeana Douglas, Bonnie Franklin and Melanie Griffith. [UPI]

"I wanted to do something that would be a great vacation for my kids. I got a phone call saying, ‘Okay, the film's shooting in Venice,' and I said, ‘I don't know what it is, but I'm going to say yes.'" — Angelina Jolie on The Tourist. [Showbiz Spy]