Momentary lapses of reason?
Skating away?
Learning to fly?
Naaah ... just too old to rock'n'roll, too young to ...

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Faltu

In last Thursday’s paper I came across this extremely erudite and innovative take on the right options for India’s next budget. Such gems of lateral thinking. Impose stiff taxes on sugar, thus not only raising Rs. 25,000 crore in revenues but also – now why didn’t PC think of this?! – reducing the incidence of diabetes. Presumably this would also reduce expenditure on health by 17,000 crores? Also, impose further taxes not on cigarettes but on beeris, because they outsell cigarettes by a factor of 4 and this would raise a further 15,000 crore. Genius, of course, lies in simplicity.

The author was one Moloy* Choudhury, founder of a unique educational institution that dares to dream. Mr. Choudhury has amply demonstrated his own ability to dream - he has earned degrees in 1962, 1964 and 1968 from an institute in Berlin that was only established in 1970. I am lost in adoring reverence. How about quadrupling the duties on all energy sources, thus not only raising revenues by a billion zillion crore but also diverting India to an infallible energy source, to wit, hot air?

All this was brought to mind by an ad for a Bangla film in today’s paper. “He is coming soon”, it said. “In search of an identity”. The film (produced, of course, by our home-grown rival to Pixar and Warner Bros., Planman Films) is named Faltu (Worthless). Too obvious, too easy. I shall refrain from further comment.

* - thank you, Swati

**** ****

Kudos to Outlook magazine for initiating the Indian Razzies. They call them the Follywood Awards. (Sadly enough, a film I quite liked, or at least didn’t dislike, is nominated in three categories.) High time, too. But wait a minute – to judge which of these films is most truly awful, surely one has to watch the films? If serious cineastes now watch the films to evaluate them fairly, they could boost viewership to “hit” levels. Then .. could it be that even sheer putridity is now used to market films?

of course, given the institute in question, the REAL solution to kick-starting India's economic growth is even simpler - we just advertise that we have the highest GDP per capita in the world and it'll automatically become true. If necessary we can claim that our poor Indian rupees were actually Deutsche Marks all along, thus instantly creating an economic superpower.

You're welcome JAPda. Apparently, this "Faltu" film has two Bombaiyya stars, none of whom speak Bangla. I just don't get it. Is there really such a clamour from the Bengali audience for movies with wooden actors and actresses, who can't even speak Bangla to save their lives?

really disappointed that salaam namaste didn'y make it... deserved atleast a couple of awards.1) worst costumes for a straight man...2) The height of living disproportionate to income...3) Best misrepresentation of a foreign country