SO what becomes a leg end most? Endurance. Even before rave re views of his Oscar-night hosting came in, Hugh Jackman was already outta there. Back to New York. While most of Hollywood stayed partying and BSing, Hugh was already on Delta’s first flight Eastward Ho! The Return to Civilization.

OSCAR’s winning docu mentary short, “Smile Pinki,” is about the work of the world’s largest cleft charity, Smile Train. For the awards, Pinki, age 8, was imported from her thatched-roof mud home in India’s now-famous slums. The Slumdog Millionaires all knew her. For Oscar night, she was bought shoes. Cameron Diaz and Eva Mendes‘ hairstylist coifed her. With extensions. And came The Moment she was announced as the winner? The star herself, Pinki, was asleep in her father’s arms.

March 17, Robin Williams, Candice Bergen, Chris Meloni, Jane Kaczmarek co-host a Smile Train benefit at Lincoln Center. For that, little Pinki is now learning to use a knife and fork.

OSCAR night. Awardee Jerry Lewis wouldn’t meet with the press . . . George Hamilton called his date “My doctor.” Willowy, bosomy, nifty, blond and inside a diamond necklace, she clearly has some great healing technique . . . Speaking of alternative medicine, Russell Simmons stands upside down every day “because it’s healthy, because it makes your heart pump faster, because blood goes in an opposite direction.” OK, fine . . . The Beverly Wilshire Hotel sent its guests statuettes of milk chocolate standing on a film reel of dark chocolate . . . Melissa George, late of “Grey’s Anatomy”? Nobody seems to have noted the bodice of her white gown was a whalebone corset.

ELTON John. I love him. If he weren’t of a slightly different persuasion, I’d zap spouse David Furnish and grab His Sirship myself. For 17 years, he’s done his AIDS fund-raiser Academy Awards night. Despite the sagging economy, this year they raised $4 million. I personally testify that co-host Victoria Beckham nearly smiled.

Maybe because names like Sharon Stone, Josh Groban, Eva Longoria Parker and Kiefer and Simon and Chace showed up, maybe because Chopard sponsored it and His Sirship flashed enough diamonds to make that other queen, Elizabeth, envious – but they had such security that it’s easier to drive straight into the lobby of the US Embassy in Baghdad.

Said Elton: “I arrived at the Pacific Design Center venue at 3 this afternoon to do seating personally and check the flowers. I also visit every single table during the evening to say thank you.”

The night included an auction. One item brought $60,000. It was an invitation to go, after Elton’s event, to the Vanity Fair party.

OSCAR week stuff: The Independent Spirit Awards after-party at Shutters in Santa Monica included mini bagels, franks and pretzels. Even the caterers must be homesick for NY! . . . Sir Ben Kingsley seen around the beach with his glistening bare head compensated by his wife’s large picture hat . . . Mariah Carey pushing her movie “Push: Based on the Novel by Sapphire” with: “It won three awards at Sundance. It’s coming out in April.” . . . James Franco of “Milk”: “I’m just glad to be here and around movie people.” . . . Illeana Douglas now producing films for the Web.

EXCUSE me, but having returned with a lousy head cold – my bones do not do well in sunny warm Southern California – I share my thoughts with you.

LA is a drought fashion-wise. A 100 percent serious severe disaster. Forget awards nights when nobody wears anything they actually bought or own and where even shoes feature labels still stuck to the underside. Minus stylists, Hollywoodites look like bag ladies. Bag ladies with no taste. Take one afternoon function. I saw:

SO out in La-La Land ex ists a gas station bearing the sign: “Oil Change & High Speed Internet Access.” It means while your car’s being serviced, so can you. Plug in and get Wi-Fi the same time your vehicle gets a lube job.