Date: Fri, 11 Dec 2009 11:07:01 -0600
From: Oliver R
Subject: american in canada-chapter 4
This story is fiction. Any similarities with peoples living or dead are
purely coincidence. Meaning that is not an autobiographical story. We just
seem to have the same name lol. Please navigate away from this page if it
is against the law in your country to view this material. Moreover do not
read if you are under the age of majority in you country, state or
province. Please do not copy without permission.
The response that I've been getting from you guys has been incredibly
overwhelming.and I love it! I really do love getting feedback from you guys
and it really means a lot to me that you guys are enjoying the story so
much. Anyways.
This chapter deals mainly with the dinner with Oliver and Colby. The music
that plays in one of the scenes is almost crucial to setting the mood so
please consult the following link to listen to the music when needed. It's
a song called 'The Chain' and it's by Ingrid Michaelson on of my favourite
artists. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fu2gxZDquzA. Other than that on
with chapter 4. Enjoy!
So what does it mean when there's a person who is all you can think
of? Or when you can't look at anyone else because they just do nothing for
you no matter how gorgeous they are? Or when no matter how hard you try to
concentrate, you can't and you seem to write his name subconsciously while
trying to do homework? I'll tell you what it means. It means you're in
love. Damn it, I'm in love.and it hurt.
My mom was right, if I fell in love with Colby, I'd be setting
myself up for getting hurt. If it hurt this much now, then it was going to
be excruciating when we drift apart when I tell him how I feel. I was never
going to tell him.
I went to sleep with Colby on my mind, I dreamt of him, and I awoke
still thinking of him. I felt happy because Colby was taking me out to
dinner that night, but sad at the same time because I knew my love would
stay unrequited. I tried hard to reason all this but one question
remained. Why would he flirt with me? Why would he hug me? Whisper
sensually in my ear whilst caressing them with his soft lips?
I slowly got up from my bed, feeling incredibly lethargic compared
to my usual mornings. I really was a morning person so this was incredibly
unusual. I was feeling everything from one extreme to the other of the
emotion spectrum. I hated this feeling and I knew it was going to dampen my
mood for the rest of the day. I hated it because the thing was that he was
the one that I wanted to want. It didn't matter that he was straight, I
wanted to wanted him. I wanted to love him. I knew I was going to get hurt,
but love skewed my logic.
<> "Oli?" I heard from the other side of my door. "You
up?" It was my sister.
"Yeah I'm up. Come in." she opened the door and came in. "What are
you doing here so early?"
"It's your birthday! Just because I'm married and have moved out
doesn't mean I'm gonna stop tradition! So come on! Get downstairs! I
brought cake and mom is making Filipino breakfast. Hurry up, I'm hungry and
mom won't let us eat until you're down there."
"Okay okay. I'll be down in sec." I said before she left the
room. I brushed my teeth and quickly headed downstairs. As soon as I got
there, my mom, dad, Kevin and Stef started singing happy birthday. They
stood around the breakfast nook table with another cake. I guess there's
some advantages to spreading out your birthday over two days.
"Come! Make a wish and blow out the candles!" my mom said ushering
me over to the table. I thought I'd have to plaster on a fake smile but I
didn't. My family always makes me smile. I made a wish before I blew out
the candles. I bet you can what I wished for, or who I mean. "Okay sit,
sit. Stef, come help me bring in the food. I made a special Filipino
breakfast for you today." my said. She would always do this when it was
either mine or Stef's birthday. I wish mom would make Filipino breakfast
every morning. It consisted of garlic fried rice, langonisa, which is a
sweet sausage, tosino, which is cured pork and eggs. Mmmm, it's so good!
Just don't forget to brush your teeth after, the garlic fried rice does
wonders for your breath.
"So, what are the plans for tonight?" Kevin asked.
"Well first, my friend Colby, the one that you met yesterday is
taking me out to dinner at around 6 and we'll probably be back around
8-8:30. I told my other friends to be here for 9:30." I looked over at my
sister, who had a shit eating grin on her face. I on the other hand didn't
look too amused. When she looked up at me, her grin disappeared and was
replaced with a look of worry.
"Do you want me to go out and get some snacks? Like some fruit,
maybe I'll make some pansit and egg rolls? Oh and did you invite your
cousins?" my mom asked.
"You don't have to get snacks. Maybe just some liquor? And yes I
did invite them."
"Nonsense. What will your guests eat? I will go out this after noon
to go grocery shopping. Your dad will go out and get the liquor." My
parents were okay with drinking, as long as it was in moderation and as
long as no one drove if they were drinking.
"What kind of liquor do you want?" my dad asked.
"Well since we have some vodka already, maybe some gin and some
tequila. Oh and maybe some beer, a case of Harp Lager and Guinness."
"Okay good! I'll go with your dad and we'll pick out some good
stuff for you. You wanna come Stef?" Kevin said.
"Nah, I'd rather wash dishes than listen to you guys talk about
soccer and beer."
"You're loss hon. You'll never know the gratification of watching
soccer." my dad said which got me and Stef laughing and my mom just shaking
her head. "Kevin, you and I will leave after breakfast."
After breakfast, my dad and Kevin left. My mom and sister finished
the dished, they wouldn't let me help cuz it was my birthday. When they
were done, my mom left for superstore for ingredients for tonight, leaving
me with my sister. Her and I just sat in the theatre room and watch some
TV. I could tell she wanted to ask what was wrong but was holding her
tongue. It was creating quite a tense atmosphere which I couldn't stand.
"Okay just ask me already. I know that's why you're quiet. You
aren't this quiet unless something is on your mind."
"Nothing, it's nothing."
"Hey do you smell that?" <> "I think
it's.it's.bullshit! You aren't fooling anyone, especially not me. I know
you."
"Okay fine. What's wrong? I know you too. And if I know you as well
as you know me then I know something is bugging you. You are never this
sombre looking. It's almost like the time when Stephen (a friend) told you
Mortimer didn't exist." we both had a chuckle. "Now come on. I'm your
sister, you can tell me what's wrong."
<>
"Well?" she said again.
"It's Colby."
"Well that doesn't help, I already figured that just by looking at
you."
"I think I'm in love with him. And it hurts because I know that
there is no chance of him loving me the way I love him. God, I've only
known him what, two months, and now, I'm completely head over heels, can't
ever back up again in love with him. And the worst part is that he accepts
me for who I am. I would probably rather him be like Mark and the other
assholes (jocks from high school) and have him beat me up. Cuz getting beat
up hurts much less than knowing I'll never have him. I want to tell him I'm
in love with him so we would drift apart before my feelings deepen even
more, but then I don't want to tell him because I don't want to lose
him. If he hated me, then it would be easier to get over him. But I don't
want to get over him. I want to want him. I'll never get over him, not if
we are still friends. The thing is though, I don't think I'd have the
courage to break our friendship off. He's everything to me." I wanted to
cry so bad. "Can you see it now? One thought contradicts another which
contradicts another until nothing makes sense."
"Oh Oliver, come here." she said as she pulled me into a hug. I
quietly sobbed on her shoulder. "Love is not a thing that is easily
understood. Sometimes we fall for people we shouldn't. I'm not saying that
you shouldn't be in love with Colby. Who you want to fall in love with and
who you don't isn't up to you though. It just happens. I just don't like
seeing you hurting like this. I've never walked in your shoes so I don't
have a clue as to how you would handle this situation. Just do what you
think is right. No matter what happens, just know that your family is here
to support you. Mama, papa, Kevin en ik hou van je heel, heel veel. U komt
voor mij als je een probleem. Oke?"(We love you very, very much. You come
to me if you have a problem. Ok?)
"Oke." (Ok.)
"Belofte?" (Promise?)
"Belofte." (Promise.)
I fell asleep on the couch while my sister watched TV. When I woke
up again, It was already 5. I slept for another 6 hours! Holy crap. Colby
would be there in an hour and I was not even thinking of getting ready. For
some reason I didn't want to go. Ok so I actually knew the reason. After
last night, my feelings for Colby grew exponentially and with that the hurt
also grew. I didn't want to cancel on Colby, so I got up. I went upstairs
and jumped in the shower. I haven't talked about my activities in the
shower because.well.I know you know what a lot of guys do in the shower so
I'll spare you the details. I'm sure you can use your imaginations. This
time though, I just wasn't in the mood. After the shower I was left with
half an hour to get dressed and gussied up for my 'dinner' with Colby. I
wanted it so bad to be a date, but I knew that that was never going happen.
I pulled out some nice charcoal grey dress pants with a matching
grey blazer. I also pulled out an nice light pink dress shirt. No tie. He
did say semi formal. I'd usually be all getting ready, but it almost felt
like torture being around him. I was one sadistic bastard for still wanting
go through with this. I pulled on a pair of Bjorn Borg underwear, some
argyle socks then put the rest of my outfit on. I took one last look in the
mirror with a finishing spritz of my cologne and then I headed
downstairs. My mom and sister were in the kitchen chatting in Tagalog and
getting food ready for tonight when came down. My sister and I were taught
how to speak our parents native tongues because they didn't want us to
forget our culture.
"Oliver! You look so handsome tonight! Come here." my mom said
pulling me into a hug and giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Colby doesn't
know how lucky he is! I know that guys would kill to have a date with you."
"Yeah yeah, you're just saying that cuz I'm your son."
"No it's true. If I weren't straight and madly in love with your
sister, I'd jump you right now!" Kevin said, walking in to the kitchen.
"Hey now, at least go up to his room!" my mom added as they all
laughed.
"Ha ha, why do guys always make fun of me?" I asked, feigning
anger.
"Because we love you!" my sister said.
"Sure sure." I said as I went to the family room to wait for
Colby. I turned on the TV and watched. I guess whatever it was I was
watching was really good because it had my complete attention. Ok so it was
America's Funniest Videos. Great stuff! The break from Colby was welcome
one though. I was so into it I didn't even realize Colby had arrived and
was sitting next to me.
"Hey man. Happy birthday." he said, bumping me on the shoulder.
"Hey. Sorry. I was really into the show. So we ready to go?" I
said, my voice dripping with nervousness as we stood up. I guess Colby must
have sensed it.
"Are you ok? We can skip dinner if you like." he said, looking more
than a little disappointed. "You're having people come over later so maybe
resting for a couple of hours will do you good." he said, rubbing my arm
gently. It's things like that made me melt, but at the same time angered
me. Does he know what he's doing to me?
"No no, I'm fine. I said I'd let you take me out to dinner, and
take me out to dinner is what you'll do." I said, doing my best to give him
a genuine smile. I guess I'm a better actor than I thought because he
visibly relaxed.
"K good. Because I want to give you your gift at dinner. I'd rather
give it to you then when we're alone than when we're in front of all your
friends." he said shyly. Wow can you say cute?
"Why? Did you get me like an engagement ring and you want our
engagement to be an intimate affair?" I said giggling. That was me being
misanthropic to myself.
"Well yeah sort of. Way to pretty much ruin it." he said completely
serious.
"What?!"
"Hey hey, calm down. I'm not going to actually propose to you. You
haven't taken me out on a first date yet." he said giggling, obviously
joking around. I was a little bit disappointed.
"Yeah I knew that." I said nonchalantly. "So let's header on
out. We don't want to miss our reservation now do we?"
"Nope we don't. Let's go!"
"K. Oh man wait, how did you get here?"
"I used my car." he said, as we said goodbye.
"Oh wow. I didn't even know you had a car. I'm guessing you drove
out here from Minneapolis. That's like an 8-9 hour drive right?"
"Yeah about that." he said as we reached his car just in the
driveway. And geez what a car it was. It was definitely the new 2009 model
Porsche Cayenne. Just the name Porsche is sexy. Add that to Colby's
sexiness and you got yourself sex on wheels!
"Wow nice car! Beats out my Jetta any day."
"Eh, it's okay. My parents insisted on getting me something that
was safe and comfortable. I would have settled on something less than a
quarter that this thing costs but my parents insisted. There really is no
arguing with them." We pulled out of the drive and headed out.
It was quiet in car. Something that almost never happens between us
and frankly, it bugged the crap out of me. Unfortunately for me, I seemed
to be getting high from his intoxicating scent. I've never gotten high,
mind you, but it definitely lulled me to sleep.
The next thing I knew, Colby was shaking me awake. "Oliver, we're
here. Oliver, wake up." he said softly. So this is what it's like to wake
up with him next to me! Ha ha ha, I'll take what I can get!
"Sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep." I said sheepishly.
"Don't worry about it. Well, you ready to go in?"
"Where are we?" I was a little disoriented from my little nap.
"Well come out and you'll find out." We got out and I took a look
around. My goodness, I knew exactly where we were. We were pretty much in
the heart of the city right near The Forks. Lobby is one of the swankiest
restaurants in Winnipeg. It was swanky without being pretentious. Yet I'm
sure they still had the steep price in common.
"Wow I've never been here before. I've heard great things of it
though."
"It's really excellent! My parents and I were here just before
classes started."
"Ha ha ha, you've only been here two months and you've already been
to a place I haven't." I said chuckling as we walked down the
sidewalk. Lobby was part of a refurbished hotel in the core of downtown
Winnipeg. The outside walls were dotted with star-like lights that came
flush with the wall. The designers went with a simplistically chic theme
utilising a brown and blue colour palette. We walked up to the Maitre'd.
"Good even sirs. How may I help you?" the older lady asked.
"Hi, I have reservations at 6:30 for 2 under Andrews." She smiled
and looked over the list.
"Ah here we are. Follow me Mr. Andrews and Mr." she said looking at
me.
"Oliver De Koning." I answered.
"Mr. De Koning." she said smiling as she led us to our table. "Here
you go gentlemen, your server tonight will be Kim and she'll be with you in
a moment." she said as she placed a menu in front of both of us and left. I
took a look over the menu and realized they didn't have prices next to any
of the orders.
"I don't know what to get." I said looking up at Colby. He smiled
back. He made me melt without knowing it. The bastard.
"I can order for you if you'd like." he asked shyly.
"Yeah if you want. I mean you've been here before, and now you're
back so you must know what's good." I said smiling back.
"Okay cool then. Um, let's see. You like seafood?'
"Mmhm."
"How 'bout lamb? And a salad?"
"Mmhm to both." I giggled. I really was like a little school girl
around him.
"Good. That was quick we know what we want even before our server
came." he said just as our server came.
"Hello gentlemen, my name is Kim, I'll be your server tonight. Can
I start you off with drinks or have already had time to look at menu?" she
said.
"Yeah we have had time to look at the menu. Can we start off with a
bottle of nice Sauvignon Blanc from a region of the chef's choice to go
with seasonal chilled seafood platter for an appetizer. Then grilled
romaine hearts for the both of us. And last can we get a bottle of Cabernet
Sauvignon also chef's choice paired with two orders of the herb crusted
rack of lamb." he said not leaving my gaze as he ordered.
"Excellent choices sir. Would you two like the Indian flatbread or
focaccia with the with the lamb?" she asked writing down the order and
smiling.
"What would you like Oliver?" he asked me.
"Um.what are you getting?"
"Well it is good with the Indian flatbread. So I'm gonna get it
with that."
"Okay, I'll get that too."
"Good. Okay we'll get that with the flatbread."
"Great, I'll be back with the wine and appetizers shortly." she
said as she walked away.
"So. I have your gift with me. Did you want to open before dinner
or did you want to open it after?"
"Well I'd rather open after. If that's okay with you." whatever the
gift was, I was sure it was going to make me cry. I've just been in an
emotional mood lately.
"That's fine with me, I want you to open it after too." he said.
The conversation between us was great. I completely forgot about my
nervousness. He seemed to put me at ease. The server came back with the
wine and the seafood platter. That was incredibly delicious. I'd never had
raw salmon before but Colby got me to try it. I'm happy he did because
salmon sashimi is now my favourite thing ever. I wasn't too keen on trying
the grilled romaine hearts. I don't know but grilled romaine hearts just
didn't appeal to me. Once again Colby got me to try it and once again I
found it to be incredibly delicious. Between the salad and the main course,
Colby said he had to go to the washroom. I was pretty sure though that he
went to go pay the bill before I saw it. If I knew wine, I knew the white
that was picked fetched at least 80 bucks and I'm sure the red for the lamb
fetched more. I really didn't understand why he'd spend so much. I mean I
would for him but why would he do it for me?
Anyways, he got back just before the lamb came. The way they
presented the food here was so simple yet elegant. It was as delicious to
the eyes as it was to the palette, and I must say that after the seafood
and the salad, I was expecting big things for the lamb. I'm not a sommelier
or professional food critique or anything, but I was taught at an early age
to appreciate good food.
The lamb was excellent. Perfectly cooked and the herb crust was
fantastic. The Indian flatbread paired perfectly with the lamb. The overall
dining experience was the best I'd ever had. After dinner the plates were
cleared.
"So I thought I'd give you your present now." Colby said taking out
a long, wrapped box from his breast pocket. "I really hope you like. I can
honestly say that I've never met anyone as special as you. You are so real
and so honest, all my friends back home were just the opposite. They would
stab you in the back in a second if it meant saving their own. I've never
had a friend like you, and.well.just open it." he said handing the box to
me. I ripped the wrapping off and opened it, and I saw a bracelet. "It's
inscribed on the back. Read it." he said nervously. I flipped it
over. 'Oliver&Colby, Best Friends' I honestly had to choke back the
tears. My mind swirled with sadness, happiness, love, heartbreak. Name the
emotion and I can guarantee I felt it. I'd never had a best friend
before. Sure I had a lot of good friends but not one of them I could really
call my best friend. Of course now when I've found someone I could call my
best friend, it had to be someone that I fell in love with. I just stared
at the bracelet, willing my eyes not give in to let a tear fall. Ingrid
Michaelson's 'The Chain' started playing softly in the background which I
found oddly fitting for the moment and made that much harder not to cry.
<>
"You don't like it do you?" he ask dejectedly.
"No, it's not that, I've just never had a best friend before." I
said shakily, still looking at the bracelet. I know that my eyes were
loosing the battle and that they'd have given in if I looked up at him.
I gave up. I was letting him go. I was settling just to be his best
friend. And it hurt. It hurt so much that my body ached to have him hold
me. 'And you my love are gone' rang in my mind. "I love it."
<>
He got up. "I got one too, see." he said showing me his. "Here, let
me put it on." he said kneeling in front of me. It really was like a
proposal but the farthest thing from it. "There." he said standing up. I
still hadn't looked at him at that point.
<>
"Look at me Oliver." he said. I shook my head, choking back a
sob. He slowly hooked his finger under my chin and pulled me up standing to
face him. I looked into his beautiful grey eyes, one of the first things I
noticed about him when I first met him. His eyes were misty and so filled
with love. It just wasn't the love that I wanted him to feel. I completely
broke down. He pulled me into a hug. My head rested in the crook of his
neck as I sobbed. The feel of hand rubbing against my back and his cologne
on his neck made me sob harder. I wanted him so bad. So bad. "I'm sorry
Oliver, I didn't mean to upset you."
"It's okay." I choked as I pulled away from him. "You didn't upset
me. I." I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him. "I'm just really
happy." I lied as I did my best to plaster on a smile.
"Well good. I'm really happy. You're my first best friend too." He
said. I was so torn at that point that I almost thought of just running out
and not looking back. But I didn't. I wanted Colby in my life, and if being
his best friend was all I could be too him, then that's what I'll do. I was
going to lock my emotions I felt for him out of my heart. But if he ever
felt the same way about me, I'd take the chain from off the door.
I'll never say that I'll never love
But I don't say a lot of thing
And you my love are gone.
"C'mon, let's get out of here. We got a party to get to." he said
smiling at me. Oh that smile.
"Okay."
<>
Okay so I don't know about you guys, but I was tearing up writing this near
the end. Either I'm just really emotional when it comes to 'perceived'
unrequited love, or I'm just weird. Anyways I want to know if reading this
chapter evoked in you the same emotion I felt while writing. Please send in
you comments, suggestions or critiques to me. I really enjoy being able to
converse with my readers and making friends with them so please drop me a
line! cndoliver@gmail.com. Till next time!
Much love,
Oliver