I have gone through my entire life thinking I had to keep someone in my private sphere just because they share a bloodline with me. Well, guess what? That’s not the case! Once you realize this, every emotionally draining family tie you have comes into question, and a sense of relief hits you. Here are five reasons you can justify ignoring your great aunt Cathy at the next family gathering:

1. You shouldn’t let them control your happiness.

No one, I repeat, no one should be the reason why you wake up every day and feel utter despair towards yourself or a situation. You have the right to what makes you happy, and if this relative shows no sign of supporting you with positivity, cut them OUT.

2. Blood is not always thicker than water.

I don’t care if there is a quote written on a canvas in your house that goes like “family is the most important love,” because I call BS on that statement. I consider my close friends more like family than I do towards some of my actual relatives. Don’t let the word “family” guilt you into keeping every member of it close.

3. Your mental health is more important than their feelings.

I don’t care if your second cousin twice removed starts crying because you don’t respond to their invite. If they are emotionally draining, you shouldn’t put how they’re feeling above your psychological health… EVER.

4. They cause unnecessary drama.

Have you ever been at a family gathering where you talk about your political stance and suddenly the whole room looks at you like you just killed the roast turkey on the table? If a group of people truly “love” you yet cause an uproar when you express the things you believe in, are they truly worth keeping in contact with?

5. You deserve to put yourself first. Period.

No one is going to put you first, so why are you not letting yourself be that person? I know a lot of us want to care and put others first. But for goodness sake, you deserve the same love you are giving others. If you are questioning whether you put yourself first in certain situations with these blood relatives, cut ‘em out, honey.