Marines in Afghanistan Banned From Making Audible Farts

The military has banned Marines serving in Afghanistan from emitting audible farts, as such gastrointestinal expressions offend the Afghan people.

According to the Military Times, this is just the latest lifestyle restriction on our Marines, who have already been told not to cuss or talk about religion, politics or girls when they are serving in combat zones in Afghanistan.

It’s also possibly the most short-sighted — as everybody knows it’s the silent ones that are the most deadly.