I’m bored far too easily. I really am. It’s something I’ve tried diligently to repair within myself, but have thus far found no success. It causes my concentration to easily wane and unfortunately it either leaves many projects I start unfinished or it finds me begging for death’s icy embrace the longer it takes to see said projects through to completion.

For as much as I hate it, boredom does at the very least have one redemptive quality. It ranks one easily bored with some of the world’s greatest minds. Bearing in mind of course, that they too hated being bored.

“Perhaps the world’s second worst crime is boredom. The first is being a bore.” -Jean Beaudrillard

“I fell asleep reading a dull book and dreamed I kept on reading, so I awoke from sheer boredom.” -Heinrich Heine

“Sooner barbarity than boredom.” -Theophile Gautier

“I am terrified of being bored.” -Marie Antoinette

One could even make a case that boredom itself killed the great Winston Churchill:

“I’m bored with it all. (Last words)” -Winston Churchill

… just kidding. Churchill actually died shortly following a severe stroke. Also, he was old.

All that to say this: Seminary is a hard place to be when one gets bored easily. People tend to think that the boredom comes from the subject matter of Scripture and that by being bored with it one is most likely on a slimy snot-soaked slippery slope straight to Hell. Well, let me be clear… Scripture doesn’t bore me. Evangelism doesn’t bore me. Practical application doesn’t bore me. It’s actually all quite enjoyable.

So, what bores me? Subject matter I will rarely, if ever put into practical application. The mathematics and sciences of the world. Also, research papers. Especially research papers with extensive citations and bibliographies and blah, blah, blah…

Okay, so sure, if I were to pursue a doctorate (which I shan’t) then I would indeed need all of the knowledge of rigorous research for my impending dissertation. But what about the rest of us..? I feel much the same way about this as I feel about calculus and the Periodic Table of Elements. In my nearly 36 years there has yet to come a day when I was in a real pickle, needing to know the elemental symbol for Potassium (it’s “K” by the way, which makes no sense).

As a result of the fact that I guess the school needs to remain accredited or something and therefore require that I take (and pay for) courses that really have no lifelong impact, I’m forced to make the best of it. Unfortunately, some things are just beyond help. Calculus? Yeah. I could be doing it in a sequined leotard while yodeling and waving pinwheels all around as Parliament Funkadelic blasts from the speakers of a mint green 1976 Ford LTD and you know what? It’s still boring.

Research papers though… If you’re fortunate enough to have an instructor willing to step outside the box with you, then there’s hope! I lucked (I don’t actually believe in luck, just go with me here.) into such an instructor this semester. So, I will not be doing “Jerome’s View of Baptism” or “The Typology of Jonah”. No, no no… I will be contrasting Doctor Who and Jesus! The working title is, “Physician, heal thy self. – How the Savior From Galilee Is Superior To the Savior From Gallifrey”.

I know, I know… it sounds irreverent, but I assure you, it’s not. There are characters all throughout the history of fictional literature that are in some small way a Christian allegory, even if unintentionally. Some are obvious like Aslan and Superman, while others you really have to think about. I happen to think that’s the case with The Doctor. Clearly he’s a type of messiah. He defeats his own death. He preaches a radical message of peace. His hand is present in all of history. He has willingly sacrificed himself on a number of occasions. The possibilities are vast and plentiful! The best part? I can forgo the drudgery of boring library research for additional study of the Gospels (which I genuinely enjoy) and the watching of copious amounts of Doctor Who episodes (which I’d watch anyway!)

At least just this once, boredom is thwarted! Also… I bet I get an “A”.

As an aside, yes I will be acknowledging that Christ is indeed real and that The Doctor is indeed a fictitious character, although if that were my only argument for why Jesus is better, this paper too would be boring!

Anyway, apart from those mentioned in this blog, where have you found a case for Christian allegory of types of Christ in fiction? Let me know in the comments!

I grew-up in church. A good church even. A little white Southern Baptist Church in a town of 600 people, located right next to the train tracks. I learned so much in that church. It essentially set the framework for my theology from a young age.

Through various circumstances, the details of which I’m not entirely clear on, my family and I left that church and joined a church just up the road. It was billed simply as a Christian church, presumably of the independent variety; which as a rule, are loosely associated with either the Church of Christ or the Disciples of Christ. Either way, they maintain a more liberal theology than the SBC.

Near the end of my almost sixteen year run with the aforementioned church, the theology of my wife and I began to charge (or perhaps evolve) and so did that of the church. As they began adopting some of the teachings of the Emergent movement of that time (specifically from Rob Bell and his Nooma video series), we began to take hold of a very Calvinistic view of Scripture. The two views clashed quite violently and we ended-up back at the SBC church I’d left years before (which coincidentally, was non-Calvinistic).

So, what am I apologizing for, as per this post’s title? During the early days of our foray into Reformed theology, we (specifically me) fell headlong into the ditch of Calvinistic elitism. We believed that because we had what we felt was a deeper understanding of the person of God that we were in some way superior to our Arminian brethren. I picked many, many fights and honestly, was a real jerk. Unfortunately, being a jerk seems to be the rule more than the exception amongst Reformed believers.

So, for all the people I was a complete schmuck to, I’m sorry. To anyone I was a theological bully to, I’m sorry. To anyone who’s spiritual walk I questioned or assaulted, I’m sorry. I’ve done a lot of growing since that time. Please forgive me.

So, where does that leave my theology?

Oh, make no mistake, I’m still very much Reformed. Although maybe not enough to really consider myself a Calvinist anymore, at least not in the 5-point sense. I’ve just chosen to no longer make that fact the hill I die on or the standard by which I gauge someone else’s salvation. I am completely over viewing Christianity as a divided camp. We’re either in it or we’re out. Division amongst Christians does nothing but cause a weakened defense against the enemy, and we need all the fortification we can get!

If we can agree on the essentials of the faith (which we’ll address another time), the rest will work itself out and you are my brother or sister in Christ.