Q: A man in our neighborhood has just been arrested for a very serious crime. The kids all knew him and he was friendly to all of us. Now my children and their friends are very confused and upset with what this man has done and they feel as if they don't know who to trust anymore. What should I tell them?

A: When things like this happen, it is confusing for everyone, including adults, the Help for Families panel says. This is why you often hear neighbors saying they are surprised and that the person who committed a crime seemed like such a nice person.

"Often people like this are very good at winning over others' trust," says panelist Chad Stefanyak.

Talk to your child about how someone can be charming but have another side, but they can't lose faith in humanity, panelist Pam Wallace says.

"For the most part, humans are good, but a few are evil," says panelist Denise Continenza.

Ask your children about their thoughts to start a conversation, says Stefanyak.

"Let them steer the discussion," he says. "Talk about how some people come across as good but have another side. Don't lecture. Ask questions."

Tell your child about your feelings as well, says Continenza. Explain that you are as surprised and shocked as they are.

Also discuss that sometimes people make mistakes, Stefanyak says. Stress that it only takes one bad mistake to really ruin your life.

Go over safety rules with your children, Continenza says.

Tell them never to be alone with any adult and talk about who to trust and who not to trust, she says.

The National Crime Prevention Council says parents should teach children to trust their instincts. Explain that if they ever feel scared or uncomfortable, they should get away as fast as they can and tell an adult. Tell them that sometimes adults they know may make them feel uncomfortable, and they should leave and tell another adult what happened. Reassure children that you will help them.

The council also says to teach your children to be assertive. Make sure they know that it's OK to say no to an adult.

Also make sure children know there are people they can trust such as a police officer, firefighter, teacher or librarian if they feel unsafe.

"Emphasize if they don't feel right about something or someone that they always can come to you," Continenza says.

There is no wrong conversation and you should reinforce the parent-child bond, says panelist Dante Bruno.

"It should be open dialogue at home," he says. "No topic should be off the table. They don't need to afraid of everyone, but it is a scary world out there, and you need to always be on guard."

Share with your children that while they need to be safe, you have hope that there are more good people than bad, Wallace says.