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Category: Parenting

As parents I find that we tend to look down on our childless friends; the single buddy or the newly married couple. We assume that they have no idea how to help with the children and make comments to then like: “You’ll understand when you have kids.”

But the other day I was the one who was shocked by three family members, who don’t have kids and who were able to deal with a situation better than I was. We were at a family BBQ and Livey was eating her supper. She wasn’t in the best mood this afternoon after not having napped and being at a family event where there were more faces that she wasn’t used to seeing, she was feeling very shy. So she’s eating her supper and she bites her tongue. When a child has this kind of ‘injury’ there is nothing you can do and it can be very frustrating to parents because they become the biggest actors in the world and it is like their arm has been cut off. Yes we all know it hurts, but it will get better! I was trying to console her but I kept focusing on the tongue and telling her it was going to be okay.

Right away my sister-in-law and Livey’s uncle asked Livey where her nose went. They made a big deal about how her nose disappeared and where did she leave it. She laughed and got so focused on the joke the whole problem about the tongue bite was gone. I was completely impressed by this idea and went out of my way to let these other adults know how much it helped. Such a small like joke, but it helped avoid a huge disaster with Livey!

This morning Livey woke up, as we say in our house, on the wrong side of the crib.

I was busy trying to put Brella back to sleep, so the rest of us could start our morning, and all that Livey wanted was Daddy. Mom went into her room to get her, but she was not having it. (If she had all her words, I’m sure this is what she would say) “Where is daddy, I was crying for daddy and he didn’t come in… this is unacceptable”. So Livey had a meltdown in her crib still waiting for daddy. The issue with Livey when she has any kind of a meltdown is she has no volume control and can be so loud!

I finally went in to get her and got her to calm down. She only wanted to get dressed on ‘mommy & daddy’s’ bed, so we went there (even though we never get dressed there in the morning). Once dressed, Mom was going to tie her hair, but she wasn’t having it. She lied down in mom’s lap and had another meltdown, so mom took Bee and went downstairs to tie her hair, leaving her with me.

I got dressed and in trying to calm Livey down and give her a hug, she threw her head into mine and my nose started bleeding. I tossed her back onto the bed to try and deal with this new problem and my nose drips onto her shirt. Great! Now she needs a new shirt. I grab a Kleenex in one hand and block my nose and throw Livey over my shoulder, go downstairs and drop her on the couch, where she proceeds to continue her meltdown.

Mom finally got to tie her hair, but when she tried to get her coat on her, she had another meltdown and we left her on the floor at the front door sounding like fire trucks coming to a five-alarm fire, while everyone else finished getting ready.

When we finally got her calmed down, I took her hand to walk outside. I looked down at Livey and said “Are you finished now, is there going to be anymore crying?”. She looked up with puffy eyes and red cheeks and said “Yes, I’m finished.”

She didn’t say boo all the way to daycare…

(The bonus in all of this, Bee, our opinionated 4 year-old, who never wants to do what we need her to do, was an angel all morning. She even came upstairs to get Livey a shirt (to replace the bloody one) and asked me if my bloody nose was okay! You have to look at the brighter side of things sometimes I guess!)

Here is a compilation of some of the silly and hilarious things that my kids say, I’ll keep it updated.

On Aug 18th, 2017:

Let me give this one a little context… Livey has recently changed classes at daycare, going from the stars to the ladybugs. Her educator has been telling her she’s a big girl and using her height as a measuring stick with how much of a ‘big’ girl she is becoming.

Bee was playing with little pieces of Lego and Livey was trying to get involved. Mom told her that it was for big girls and the pieces were a little too big for her and this is what she said.

Livey: …but mommy I am a big girl!
Livey: …but I can reach the shelf!
Livey: …but I’m a LADYBUG!!!!

On Aug 6th, 2017:
Bee was playing with her pretend food and putting it all in a backpack.

Dad: Wait take that brown one back out, what is it?Bee: I dunno what this is…Dad: It’s a chicken drumstick.

She laughed and walked away. A few seconds later she called me from across the room and said “Like this daddy?“. She was using the drumstick to hit the music toy with the drums on it!

I then tried to explain to her that a Chicken Drumstick and an actual Drumstick are not quite the same thing. She was very confused….

On Apr 4th, 2017:
(I will preface this with the fact that my kids have been obsessed with the trolls music and the Justin Timberlake song. Also Livey’s teacher had told me a story about getting stuck in the mud at daycare while playing in a puddle.)

Lying in bed the other night during our nightly cuddles Bee starts to tell me a story about how she acted out Sleeping beauty with some of the other children at daycare.

She was playing the part of Aurora, got pricked by the spinning wheel and feel to the floor cause she was put under the spell. One of the boys in her class was playing the prince and I asked her what happened next. She tells me the boy kissed me to wake up the princess! Right away I asked her where did he kiss you? She said on the lips, “that’s where prince Philip kisses Aurora in the movie!”

I don’t know about this kissing thing… I’m going to have to talk to this boy! 😉

When Bee goes to bed every night she loves to cuddle. She loves to have one of her parents lie down with her while she falls asleep, which she never does. It’s more like, ‘lie here while I try and do every little annoying thing that I like to do in and out of my bed, even though I’m supposed to be falling asleep’.

It has slowly turned into ‘Can I tell you about my day?’ or ‘Can we talk about something?’ Which honestly I find completely adorable. She’ll tell me about who she was playing with at daycare, or confess something about her day that she did that she isn’t necessarily proud of or tell me cute stories about what she wants to be when she grows up, currently it’s Princess Teacher Police Officer but she’s not sure how to actually become a Princess cause all of the girls in the movies are Princesses from the start!

The other night we had this little banter:

Bee: Daddy, I love you all the way to Florida!

Me: Aww thanks sweetie, I love you too. Did you know Nonni is on her way to Florida?

Bee: How is she getting there? It’s far away right?

Me: On a plane, you can drive there but it will take a really long time. Do you remember that you’ve been to Florida two times. The last time Livey was a little bigger than Brella and she was almost crawling.

Bee: And Brella was in mommy’s belly?

Me: No Brella wasn’t there yet. We didn’t have her…

Bee: So she was at Nonni’s house, with Nonni?

Me: No we didn’t have her…

Bee: So, where was she?

Me: (Kind of unsure where to go with this with the 4 year old) So what do you remember about Florida…?

Bee: ….there are pools and grass and sand….

The conversation went on but I got to change the topic and she barely noticed. I really wasn’t sure where I wanted that conversation to go and right then I wasn’t getting into how Brella got into mommy’s belly!

My little family started 4 years ago and we’ve gone through so much in so little time. At the end of every day my wife and I collapse on the couch and give each other this look that says “We survived another day.”

Our 3 little princesses, Bee, Livey and Brella are adorable and a handful. Bee is an outgoing, constantly moving, energetic 4 year old. Livey is an assertive, silly 2 year old, constantly hoping around like a bunny. And Brella is 5 months old, still trying to find her own space in this silly family.

My wife and I constantly find ourselves telling stories to our friends and family about all of the hilarious and ridiculous situations our kids get into so I thought that this would be a great place to put all of those stories for everyone to hear.

I am by no means an expert in the world of parenting or being a father, but in 4 years of changing diapers, dealing with tantrums and holding back proud tears, I think I’ve learned a few things and picked up a few tricks, so maybe I can pass on some of that wisdom.

I hope you enjoy the stories and would love for you to leave you own stories in the comments.