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I’m sure you know by now humans evolved from primates (macaques and apes). In fact, some studies say we share up to 99% genetic similarity!

While driving back home from work this evening, an incident in Kathmandu traffic planted a thought: Are some of us more closely related to our ancestors than others?

Monkeying with my mind a little, I realised it must be so. After all, no humans are alike.. so some of us must be more ‘monkey’ than others. Maybe by a small fraction, maybe by more..

I did a quick search, and (with due respect to our ancestors) found the similarities could often be striking!

So, here I have compiled a set of questions to help rate one’s proximity to our ancestors. View the videos for behavioral clarity, and rank yourself from one to 10 for each question, to find out ‘how monkey are you?’

(Score index below)

1. How likely are you to drive like this?

2. How often do you leave food packets exactly where you finish eating?

3. How often do you do this while somebody is trying to have an honest conversation?

4. How often do you steal from others, and pretend like the stuff has always been yours?

5. How much do you tend to harass strangers of different race, color or sex?

5. How likely are you to do such horrible stuff to members of your own race, and find it funny?

Score index:

0-20: You are more human, i.e. only if you are not lying. If you are, you are a lying monkey. Visit a therapist.

21-40: You need to check on yourself buddy. Maybe hire a monkey trainer. In your case, it will not be illegal.

41-60: Congratulations! You belong in a zoo!

P.S. On a serious note, this is the ‘Year of the Monkey’ as per the Chinese calendar. Macaques and apes are just amazing..much more than many of us can ever be! Here’s a good piece to start learning about them: 11 things you didn’t know about monkeys.