Monday, December 27, 2010

The Aunt Who Disowned Us

My mother's youngest sister, Pauline Meinzen - or Aunt Polly, as we always called her - was born this day in 1927. The photobooth photo at left was probably taken when she was 10 or 12.

I don't know what her childhood was like but her sisters have told me that she was spoiled and often got her way. Looking back from my adult perspective at my interactions with her and observing her interactions with others, it seems that she quietly barrelled her way through life, setting goals and achieving them.

Aunt Polly was the aunt who disowned her family - all 3 sisters and all 8 of us neices and nephews - after her father's death. There was a disagreement about who would pay for the funeral. I wasn't involved in the funeral payment problem but I was also disowned. That one action on her part darkened all the previous happy, childhood memories of her when I actually thought she loved me.

What happens to people to cause money to become more important than people and love and family?

Aunt Polly passed away several years ago. I hope she's having a happy birthday.

14 comments:

I have an uncle who disowned the family, my fathers youngest brother. It's so sad to have the family torn apart that way. He is still alive so now is not the time for me to blog about it but someday I will. Thanks for sharing.

That is sad I agree, funny how money can cause problems in families. We have had those problems in my parents generation and though people were not disowned there was always an under lying un happiness. Could happen in my generation if things do not get talked out.

I almost didn't publish this post.... It seems like this kind of thing happens more often than one would think. It's so good when these tendencies in families can be averted because relatives actively choose not to make the problem bigger than the people.

Nancy, Aunt Polly may have had some form of borderline personality disorder. We have a case like this in our own family. Her behavior sounds so familiar. Our family motto is "don't engage". Its hard, but its the only thing that doesn't make things worse. I'm sorry things didn't end well.

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Sometimes I want to jump back in time, into the lives of my ancestors. Not to stay, of course -- too many modern conveniences I'd rather not do without -- but to meet them and watch their interactions with each other. Since I can't do that, I spend time learning about them and the times in which they lived. I look forward to meeting them. I've been seriously searching for my ancestors for nearly 8 years. I plan to continue indefinitely.
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