If I’m Going to Stare At An Ass…

The other night when I was wandering in a zone I saw some players on the area chat discussing the ever-popular question of who was what gender in real life. Are all the female avatars here really girls? I was, but I don’t always speak up in this kind of conversation. In this case I first watched a little, just to see what other players were saying.

One player confessed to being male, but then used the old line “If I’m going to stare at an ass for 60 levels it may as well be a hot ass.” Another person then said “LOL,” as if this was a new quip that he had never heard before and was truly a cause for laughter.

Both of these young men should be fired from videogames; they should have their videogames cards revoked immediately for their lack of awareness and cleverness.

I couldn’t shut up after hearing that, so I mocked them. Sometimes even those of us that moderate other games have our moments of weakness. To be fair, “if I’m going to stare at an ass…” is not exactly a reportable offense, just an annoying joke that I’m tired of hearing. I said it was the “second-oldest one in the book,” right next to “get back in the kitchen.” Here it is, live in the wild, in 2004. I’m not sure if the line actually originates in the PVP comic, but even if it does, that makes the gag almost a decade old now! I believe it might actually be older.

Another pragmatic reason is that in games where third-person perspective is used, men prefer to stare at a female body rather than a male body. This is tied closely to the Laura Croft Syndrome – the appeal of being able to view and, more importantly, control a female body that is sexy but deadly. Feminists have argued that male gender-bending is really just a new way for men to dominate female bodies.

While there might be some aspect of this going on, it probably is a little more complicated than that. I think a person’s real reasons for choosing an avatar can vary a lot. I know I do tend to choose the female avatar not just because I identify with her better, but because she tends to be more attractive than male avatars. I don’t necessary even mean in a sexualized way, since I’ll often rough up my avatars with a few scars and the avatars I identify the most with aren’t always the “sexiest.” It’s not about “seeing a hot ass.” I just mean ladies are attractive to look at and fun to dress up.

It’s perfectly culturally acceptable for me to say this, but if a man were to say the same thing about a male avatar, it would easily be turned into a sexualized thing regardless of his intentions. Derek Burrill gave a speech at the Gotland Game Conference that discussed how game culture displays and defines masculinity. The video is an hour long, but worth watching if you have the time (as is Heidi’s video, above; I loved every talk at this conference). In his speech he dissected in particular a construction of masculinity that, in part, explicitly denied homosexuality. Declaring, swiftly, “No homo!” becomes a way for a young man to explicitly declare his true manhood to other men. In that way, I think the “stare at a female ass” construction is a way that male players try to deflect any accusations of homosexuality from having a gender-swapped avatar… while, at the same time, perhaps subtly suggesting that those who choose a male avatar may be, themselves, “the gay ones.” Along with that is the implicit assumption that homophobia is OK and that homosexuality is something to be ridiculed. Derek himself asks, is there perhaps something homo-erotic implied about staring at another man’s ass for hours of game time? Maybe! Should that matter? Many people equate homosexuality with being effeminate; thus, if you want to look at a man, you aren’t “a real man.”

Casting a spell on the neighbors.

So what’s annoying about the “if I’m going to stare at an ass” comment? Well, I hope I’ve pointed out sufficiently that it’s pretty old and stale by now. It’s kind of homophobic. And it assumes objectification of a female avatar as her default state. That particular avatar exists to be looked-at by you rather than be something you embody. I think I’ve made my position clear in that I’m okay with objectification (of any body or gender) as long as it’s done on purpose with some kind of thought. I’m okay with very sexy characters. I’m annoyed however by female objectification as the assumed default.

My Neverwinter Noble’s Chest came with a statuette of the lovely Valindra: a woman who happens to be dead, but is using her lich magic to appear totally stacked. While this is her prerogative as a liberated ghoul and woman, I can’t help but feel like this statue itself is not an item “for me.” It really feels like a character I’m supposed to want to just stare at. It kind of assumes that I am a straight dude and would want an item a straight dude would be interested in having on his mantle. It’s cool swag, but a dragon or a giant or something that didn’t make that implied assumption would’ve been cool too.

I will say one thing: from now on, when that conversation comes up in a chat, I won’t hesitate to say “Yes, I am a woman.” Not because I want to draw attention to myself, but because I’m a competent player and women in MMOs deserve to be acknowledged and not invisible. Maybe if we keep speaking up, we won’t seem so unusual anymore.

And if you see the “I’m going to stare at an ass” line, please, feel free to call the perpetrator an asshole. Do it for me.

You make a dozen fascinating points with this post. I’m one of the guys that absolutely prefers to play as females. I explain it as “they usually have the more-interesting dialog options.” But it probably goes deeper and beyond that.

I also prefer my femme Sheps, Rogues, and Wastelanders dressed a tad more conservatively, and experienced from the first-person (if an option). Again, not sure what that says about me.

It might be a little more of that ludo-narrative thing. But it could also be a more my Christian conservative convictions playing out. The one thing that I do know for sure is that if Lara is gonna survive that island in her new game, she needs something warmer than that tank top. If there’s anything I know, it’s that getting thunder-stormed-on for more than a few seconds with nothing protecting your torso other than a tank top and bra will lead to some serious body temperature issues if not hypothermia. Rhianna Pratchett should know better than to write protective clothing as optional DLC.

Also, have you played the new TR? Playing it after Last of Us has me constantly thinking “Dang, this is such a videogame.” From a narrative sense, this is bad. From a gameplay perspective, it’s favorable. But I find myself completely divided on it.

I never created a female PC in a MUD or MMORPG, but I can imagine a male player doing so for no other reason than to explore a character with a significant difference from his real-life conception of himself.

I’m a roleplayer. I currently roleplay in Lord of the Rings Online, even though I’m not very active in it. For me, RP is a combination of cooperative storytelling and a personal exploration of people that I am not, but maybe could be. My RP characters are not me, but they are all drawn from me. I’m not a woman, but I can empathize with women. In fiction and television shows, I can sympathize and even strongly identify with female characters. It doesn’t have to be about sex or gender identity. It can just be about empathy, about discovering who you might be if you were someone else.

I stopped myself from creating a female character on an MMO once, because I was uneasy with all the pervy and sexist connotations that people associate with a male playing a female character. But I have played female characters in single-player games, and I would not read any implications about someone’s prejudices or sexual preferences based on what gender they play in an RPG.