Friendship, success, family, purpose and love. (Oh yeah, and a sexy body.) Everybody wants some of that, right? This blog is about one woman's endeavor to find, and deal with, all of those things — and the never-ending struggle to keep her apartment clean.

The Gravity of Things

We have meditation on Sunday mornings before church, and a few weeks ago my mind went off on a strange tangent while we were listening to some music. I was trying to empty my mind out and when I did something else just flowed back in…

I am powerful and intensely attractive. I have my own gravity. Like and astral body. Like the moon, the stars. You’re drawn to me. You have to look. You’re drawn to me — to my light. To my power and my intensity. You want to get closer. To touch me. To learn all about me. To bathe in the radiance and gain some of what I have.

After meditation I wrote that down in my journal. I haven’t tried to figure out if it means anything but it did make me think about the gravity of things. And I can’t help but wonder, what pulls us in? Into a conversation? An event? Another person’s life?

And what kind of gravity do I have?

What kind of things have gravity that affects me?

The moon, my bed, my friends…heck, my TV sure has a lot of gravity on the nights that I’m tired from a 10-hour day at work.

And are we attracted to things that are like us or things that are unlike us?

That boy I still have a crush on… The job I don’t have… Graduate school…

I think about jobs and activities and people and I realize haven’t been very mindful about what is drawing me in. Or what I’m drawing in.

I wonder if people can feel my gravity. Who feels it? Who responds? And who are the people who are responding to something else? Or the people who aren’t still enough to feel the pull of anything because they are busy pushing or running or trudging against the flow.

That’s all I have for today…just the swirl of questions and the reminder that I do feel the pull. I wonder where it’s taking me.

That was definitely profound. Well, now I am wondering how the “gravity” is affecting me? I may try attempt ” the empty my mind” to see if something flows back in. What if nothing flows back? Should I be worried? Interesting post.

This post was an interesting choice to follow the last one in my personal opinion. Reading the comments on your last post made me spend a significant amount of time wondering how you draw your particular readers in and why they care the way they do about your personal life/ choices. I have a completly different type of following and just thought it was interesting that we attract opposites yet share a best friend.

An interesting choice, eh? I actually didn’t put much thought into it. It’s just what I had ready to come out. Sometimes I plan ahead. (I planned Monday’s post for a couple of weeks.) Sometimes it just comes out of me.

A lot of the people who were concerned (and/or negative) about my last post are people I know from church. Or my Christian college. They are people who are still in the church and still trying to protect her. Although, the church really doesn’t need to be protected from me. I’m not trying to bring it down. I tried to change it for a long time. But now, I just worship somewhere else. Heck everywhere else.

I have a lot of great Christian friends who I’m sure read the post and were immediately worried about me. But they didn’t lash out and they didn’t preach at me. They might mention it the next time we speak. They might not. They might be praying for me. They know I’ve read the Bible verses. They believe me when I tell them that I am searching for God. And they trust that God is big enough to be found.

And as for our friend…he’s just been here for so long. He knows things about me that I don’t even know. I wonder if we would be friends if we met for the first time today. I’d like to think so.

Of course you would be friends. I didn’t mean anything negative about the people who commented on your last post or your readers at all. I’m sorry if it came off that way. I was just thinking that you are a bright sunshiny kinda person and I’m a dark cynical person. The people that gravitate towards you seem to be sunshiny as well. I just thought it was interesting is all. Genuinely kind lovely people usually avoid me…lovely as I am 😉 It’s probably all the black I wear.