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R.U.R.
(Rossum´s Universal Robots)
A play in introductory scene and three acts
by
Karel Čapek
Translated into English by David Wyllie.
eBooks@Adelaide
2006
Table of Contents
DRAMATIS PERSONAE
Introductory Scene
ACT ONE
ACT TWO
ACT THREE
DRAMATIS PERSONAE
Harry Domin Director General, Rossum's Universal Robots
Fabry Technical Director, R.U.R.
Dr. Gall Head of Physiology and Research Department, R.U.R.
Dr. Hallemeier Head of Institute for Robot Psychology and Behaviour, R.U.R
Busman Commercial Director, R.U.R.
Alquist Head of Construction, R.U.R.
Helena Glory
Nana Her Nanny
Marius Robot
Sulla Robot, female
Radius Robot
Damon Robot
1. Robot
2. Robot
3. Robot
4. Robot
Primus Robot
Helena Robot, female
Robot servant
and numerous robots
Domin in introductory scene, about thirty-eight years old, tall, clean shaven
Fabry also clean shaven, fair, serious and delicate features
Dr. Gall light build, lively, dark complexion and black moustache
Hallemeier heavy build, noisy, big ginger moustache and ginger shock of hair
Busman fat, bald, short-sighted Jew
Alquist older than the others, dressed without care, long grey hair and beard
Helena very elegant
in the play proper, all ten years older
In the introductory scene, the robots are dressed like people. They are slightly mechanical in
their speech and movements, blank of expression, fixed in their gaze. In the play proper they
wear linen blouses seized at the waist with a belt and on their breasts wear a brass number
Intervals after the introductory scene and the second act.
Introductory Scene
Central office at the factory of Rossum‘s Universal Robots. Entrance stage right. Through the
windows can be seen endless rows of factory buildings. Stage left, further administrative
areas.
Domin (Sitting at a large American desk in a swivelling chair. On the table are a lamp,
telephone, paperweight, files, letters, papers etc. On the wall, stage left, are large maps
showing shipping lines and railway lines, large calendar, clock showing just before midday;
on the wall stage right are printed posters: “The Cheapest Workforce You Can Get: Rossum’s
Robots”, “Latest invention; Robots for the Tropics. 150 d. each”, “Everyone Should have a
Robot!”, “Reduce the Cost of your Products! Order a Robot from Rossum’s!”. Also other
maps, shipping timetable, notice board with telegrams, rates of exchange etc. In contrast
with the content of the walls, the floor is covered with a magnificent Turkish carpet, stage
right is as round armchair, settee, sumptuous leather armchair, bookshelves containing not
books but bottles of wines and spirits. Stage left, safe. Beside Domin’s desk a typewriter at
which Sulla is writing)
Domin (dictating) "… cannot take responsibility for items damaged in transit. The captain of
your vessel was given warning at time of loading that it was not suitable for the carriage of
robots, and so damage to its cargo cannot be charged to our account. Yours faithfully,
Rossum’s Universal Robots.” Is that it now?
Sulla Yes
Domin New letter. Friedrichswerke, Hamburg. Date. “We are pleased to confirm receipt of
your order for fifteen thousand robots …” (telephone rings. Domin lifts receiver and speaks)
Hello, central office … yes … certainly … oh yes, as always … of course, send him a
telegram .. fine! (hangs up) Where were we?
Sulla … your order for fifteen thousand robots.
Domin (thoughtfully) fifteen thousand robots, fifteen thousand robots,
Marius (enters) Mr. Domin, there is a lady outside who is asking …
Domin Who is it?
Marius I do not know. (gives him visiting card)
Domin (reading) Mr. Glory, managing director of ... Show him in!
Marius (opens door) Please come in, madam.
(enter Helena Glory. Exit Marius)
Domin (standing) Do come in.
Helena Mr. Domin, the managing director?
Domin At your service
Helena I’ve come to see you …
Domin … with the visiting card of Mr. Glory - no more need be said.
Helena Mr. Glory is my father. I’m Helena Glory.
Domin Miss Glory, this is an exceptional honour for us that ...
Helena .. that you can’t just show me the door
Domin ... that we can welcome the daughter of an illustrious businessman like you father.
Please take a seat. Sulla, you can go now (exit Sulla)
Domin (sitting) How can I help you, Miss Glory?
Helena I’ve come here ...
Domin .. to see our factory for making people for yourself. All our visitors want to see the
factory. And of course you’re very welcome.
Helena I thought it wasn’t allowed to ...
Domin ... enter the factory? Well, of course it’s not, but everyone who comes here has a
recommendation from somebody, Miss Glory.
Helena And do you let everyone see it ... ?
Domin Not all of it. Making artificial people is an industrial secret.
Helena Why will you never let me finish what I say?
Domin Oh, I’m sorry. Is that not what you were going to say?
Helena I was going to ask ....
Domin ... whether I might show you something in our factory that the others aren’t allowed to
see. Well, I’m sure that’ll be OK, Miss Glory.
Helena What makes you think that’s what I was going to ask?
Domin Everyone asks for the same thing. (standing) I can personally show you more than
the others are allowed to see.
Helena Thank you.
Domin All I ask is that you don’t say anything at all to anyone else.
Helena (stands and offers her hand) Word of honour.
Domin Thank you. Would you not like to take off your veil?
Helena Oh, of course, you’ll be wanting to see my face. Do excuse me.
Domin That’s alright.
Helena And, if you would just let go of my hand ...
Domin (releases hand) I’m sorry, I forgot.
Helena (removes veil) Do you want to make sure I’m not a spy. You seem very careful.
Domin (looks at her, enchanted) Hm – oh, yes, - well – that’s just how we are.
Helena Don’t you trust me?
Domin Exceptionally. Miss, er, do excuse me Miss Glory. This really is an exceptional
pleasure. Did you have a good crossing?
Helena Yes. Why?
Domin Because – well, that is – because you are very young.
Helena Are we going into the factory now?
Domin Yes. I suppose about twenty-two?
Helena Twenty-two what?
Domin Years.
Helena Twenty-one. Why do you want to know that?
Domin Because ... sort of ... (with enthusiasm) You will be staying here for some time, won’t
you.
Helena That depends on how much you choose to show me.
Domin Ah, the damned factory! But of course, Miss Glory, you can see everything. Do
please sit down. Would you be interested in hearing the history of our invention?
Helena Yes, I would. (sits)
Domin Well this is what happened. (sits at desk, seems captivated by Helena and speaks
quickly) It was in 1920 when old Rossum, still a young man then but a great scientist, came
to live on this isolated island in order to study marine biology. Stop. Alongside his studies,
he made several attempts to synthesise the chemical structure of living tissues, known as
protoplasm, and he eventually discovered a material that behaved just the same as living
tissue despite being, chemically, quite different. That was in 1932, exactly four hundred and
forty years after the discovery of America.
Helena Do you know all this by heart?
Domin I do. Physiology really isn’t my subject. Shall I carry on?
Helena If you like.
Domin (triumphant) And then, Miss Glory, this is what he wrote down in his chemical notes:
„Nature has found only one way of organising living matter. There is however another way
which is simpler, easier to mould, and quicker to produce than Nature ever stumbled across.
This other path along which life might have developed is what I have just discovered.“ Just
think: he wrote these words about a blob of some kind of coloidal jelly that not even a dog
would eat. Imagine him sitting with a test tube and thinking about how it could grow out into
an entire tree of life made of all the animals starting with a tiny coil of life and ending with ...
ending with man himself. Man made of different material than we are. Miss Glory, this was
one of the great moments of history.
Helena What happened next?
Domin Next? Next he had to get this life out of the test tube and speed up its development so
that it would create some of organs needed such as bone and nerves and all sorts of things and
find materials such as catalysts and enzymes and hormones and so on and in short ... are you
understanding all of this?
Helena I ... I'm not sure. Perhaps not all of it.
Domin I don't understand any of it. It's just that using this slime he could make whatever he
wanted. He could have made a Medusa with the brain of Socrates or a worm fifty meters
long. But old Rossum didn't have a trace of humour about him, so he got it into his head to
make a normal vertebrate, such as human being. And so that's what he started doing.
Helena What exactly was it he tried to do?
Domin Imitating Nature. First he tried to make an artificial dog. It took him years and years,
and the result was something like a malformed deer which died after a few days. I can show
you it in the museum. And then he set to work making a human being.
(Pause)
Helena And that's what I'm not allowed to tell anyone?
Domin No-one whatsoever.
Helena Pity it's in all the papers then.
Domin That is a pity. (jumps off desk and sits beside Helena) But do you know what's not in
all the papers? (taps his forehead) That old Rossum was completely mad. Seriously. But
keep that to yourself. He was quite mad. He seriously wanted to make a human being.
Helena Well that's what you do, isn't it?
Domin Something like that, yes, but old Rossum meant it entirely literally. He wanted, in
some scientific way, to take the place of God. He was a convinced materialist, and that's why
he wanted to do everything simply to prove that there was no God needed. That's how he had
had the idea of making a human being, just like you or me down to the smallest hair. Do you
know anything about anatomy, Miss Glory?
Helena Er, not really, no.
Domin No, nor do I. But just think of how old Rossum got it into his head to make
everything, every gland, every organ, just as they are in the human body. The Appendix. The
tonsils. The belly-button. Even the things with no function and even, er, even the sexual
organs.
Helena But the sexual organs would, er, they'd ...
Domin They do have a function, I realise that. But if people are going to be made artificially
then, er, then there's not really much need for them.
Helena I see what you mean.
Domin In the museum I'll show you the monstrosity he created over the ten years he was
working. It was supposed to be a man, but it lived for a total of three days. Old Rossum had
no taste whatsoever. This thing is horrible, just horrible what he did. But on the inside it's got
all the things that a man's supposed to have. Really! The detail of the work is quite amazing.
And then Rossum's nephew came out here. Now this man, Miss Glory, he was a genius. As
soon as he saw what the old man was doing he said, 'This is ridiculous, to spend ten years
making a man; if you can't do it quicker than Nature then you might as well give up on it'.
And then he began to study anatomy himself.
Helena That's not what they say in the papers either.
Domin (standing) What they say in the papers are paid advertisements and all sorts of
nonsense. They say the old man invented the robots himself, for one thing. What the old man
did might have been alright for a university but he had no idea at all about industrial
production. He thought he'd be making real people, real Indians or real professors or real
idiots. It was young Rossum who had the idea of making robots that would be a living and
intelligent workforce. What they say in the papers about the two great men working together
is just a fairy tale - in fact they never stopped arguing. The old atheist had no idea about
industry and commerce, and the young man ended up shutting him up in his laboratory where
he could play around with his great failures while he got on with the real job himself in a
proper scientific way. Old Rossum literally cursed him. He carried on in his laboratory,
producing two more physiological monstrosities, until one day they found him there dead.
And that's the whole story.
Helena And then, what did the young one do?
Domin Ah now, young Rossum; that was the start of a new age. After the age of research
came the age of production. He took a good look at the human body and he saw straight away
that it was much too complicated, any good engineer would design it much more simply. So
he began to re-design the whole anatomy, seeing what he could leave out or simplify. In
short, Miss Glory ... I'm not boring you, am I?
Helena No, quite the opposite, this is fascinating.
Domin So young Rossum said to himself: Man is a being that does things such as feeling
happiness, plays the violin, likes to go for a walk, and all sorts of other things which are
simply not needed.
Helena Oh, I see!
Domin No, wait. Which are simply not needed for activities such as weaving or calculating.
A petrol engine doesn't have any ornaments or tassels on it, and making an artificial worker is
just like making a petrol engine. The simpler you make production the better you make the
product. What sort of worker do you think is the best?
Helena The best sort of worker? I suppose one who is honest and dedicated.
Domin No. The best sort of worker is the cheapest worker. The one that has the least needs.
What young Rossum invented was a worker with the least needs possible. He had to make
him simpler. He threw out everything that wasn't of direct use in his work, that's to say, he
threw out the man and put in the robot. Miss Glory, robots are not people. They are
mechanically much better than we are, they have an amazing ability to understand things, but
they don't have a soul. Young Rossum created something much more sophisticated than
Nature ever did - technically at least!
Helena They do say that man was created by God.
Domin So much the worse for them. God had no idea about modern technology. Would you
believe that young Rossum, when he was alive, was playing at God.
Helena How was he doing that!
Domin He started to make super-robots. Working giants. He tried to make them four meters
tall - you wouldn't believe how those monsters kept breaking up.
Helena Breaking up?
Domin Yes. All of a sudden, for no reason, a leg or an arm would break. This planet just
seems too small for monsters like that. So now we just make them normal size and normal
proportions.
Helena I saw my first robot in our village. They'd bought him so that .... that's to say they'd
employed him to ...
Domin Bought it, Miss Glory. Robots are bought and sold.
Helena ... they'd obtained him to work as a road sweeper. I watched him working . He was
strange. So quiet.
Domin Have you seen my typist?
Helena I didn't really notice her.
Domin (rings) You know, RUR, Ltd. has never really make individual robots, but we do have
some that are better than others. The best ones can last up to twenty years.
Helena And then they die, do they?
Domin Yes, they get worn out.
(enter Sulla)
Domin Sulla, let Miss Glory have a look at you.
Helena (stands and offers her hand) Pleased to meet you. It must be very hard for you out
here, cut off from the rest of the world.
Sulla I do not know the rest of the world Miss Glory please sit down
Helena (sits) Where are you from?
Sulla From here, the factory
Helena Oh, you were born here.
Sulla Yes I was made here.
Helena (startled) What?
Domin (laughing) Sulla isn't a person, Miss Glory, she's a robot.
Helena Oh, please forgive me ...
Domin (puts his hand on Sulla's shoulder) Sulla doesn't have feelings. You can examine her.
Feel her face and see how we make the skin.
Helena Oh, no, no!
Domin It feels just the same as human skin. Sulla even has the sort of down on her face that
you'd expect on a blonde. Perhaps her eyes are a bit small, but look at that hair. Turn around,
Sulla.
Helena Stop it!
Domin Talk to our guest. We're very honoured to have her here.
Sulla Please sit down miss. (both sit) Did you have a good crossing.
Helena Er, yes, yes, very good thank you.
Sulla It will be better not to go back on the Amelia Miss Glory. The barometer is dropping
fast, and has sunk to 705. Wait here for the Pennsylvania, that is a very good and very strong
ship.
Domin How big is it?
Sulla It is twelve thousand tonnes and can travel at twenty knots.
Domin (laughing) That's enough now, Sulla, that's enough. Show us how well you speak
French.
Helena You speak French?
Sulla I speak four languages. I can write 'Dear Sir! Monsieur! Geehrter Herr! Ctěný pane!'
Helena (jumping up) This is all humbug! You're all charlatans! Sulla's not a robot, she's a
living girl just like I am. Sulla, you should be ashamed of yourself - why are you play-acting
like this?
Sulla I am a robot.
Helena No, no, you're lying! Oh, I'm sorry, Sulla, I realise ... I realise they force you to do it
just to make their products look good. Sulla, you're a living girl just like I am - admit it.
Domin Sorry Miss Glory. I'm afraid Sulla really is a robot.
Helena You're lying!
Domin (stands erect) What's that? - (rings) If you'll allow me, it seems I'll have to convince
you.
(enter Marius)
Domin Marius, take Sulla down to the dissection room to have her opened up. Quickly!
Helena Where?
Domin The dissection room. Once they've cut her open you can come down and have a look.
Helena I'm not going there!
Domin If you'll forgive me, you did say something about lying.
Helena You're going to have her killed?
Domin You don't kill a machine.
Helena (arms around Sulla) Don't worry, Sulla, I won't let them take you. Do they always
treat you like this? You shouldn't put up with it, do you hear, you shouldn't put up with it.
Sulla I am a robot.
Helena I don't care what you are. Robots are people just as good as we are. Sulla, would you
really let them cut you open.
Sulla Yes.
Helena And aren't you afraid of dying?
Sulla I do not understand dying, Miss Glory.
Helena Do you know what would happen to you then?
Sulla Yes, I would cease to move.
Helena This is terrible!
Domin Marius, tell the lady what you are.
Marius Robot, Marius.
Domin And would you take Sulla down to the dissection room?
Marius Yes.
Domin Would you not feel any pity for her?
Marius I do not understand pity.
Domin What would happen to her.
Marius She would cease to move. She would be put on the scrap heap.
Domin That's what death is, Marius. Are you afraid of death.
Marius No.
Domin There, Miss Glory, you see? Robots don't cling to life. There's no way they could
do. They've got no sense of pleasure. They're less than the grass.
Helena Oh stop it! Send them out of here, at least!
Domin Marius, Sulla, you can go now.
(Sulla and Marius exeunt)
Helena They're horrible. This is vile, what you're doing here.
Domin What's vile about it?
Helena I don't know. Why ... why did you give her the name 'Sulla'?
Domin Don't you like that name?
Helena It's a man's name. Sulla was a Roman general.
Domin Was he? We thought Marius and Sulla were lovers.
Helena No, Marius and Sulla were generals who fought against each other in ... oh I forget
when.
Domin Come over to the window. What do you see?
Helena Bricklayers.
Domin They're robots. All the workers here are robots. And down here; what do you see
there?
Helena Some kind of office.
Domin That's the accounts department. And in the ...
Helena ...lots of office workers.
Domin They're all robots. All our office staff are robots. Over there there's the factory ....
(just then, factory whistles and sirens sound)
Domin Lunchtime. The robots don't know when they're supposed to stop working. At two
o'clock I'll show you the mixers.
Helena What mixers?
Domin (drily) For mixing the dough. Each one of them can mix the material for a thousand
robots at a time. Then there are the vats of liver and brain and so on. The bone factory. Then
I'll show you the spinning-mill.
Helena What spinning-mill
Domin Where we make the nerve fibres and the veins. And the intestine mill, where
kilometers of tubing run through at a time. Then there's the assembly room where all these
things are put together, it's just like making a car really. Each worker contributes just his own
part of the production which automatically goes on to the next worker, then to the third and on
and on. It's all fascinating to watch. After that they go to the drying room and into storage
where the newly made robots work.
Helena You mean you make them start work as soon as they're made?
Domin Well really, it's more like working in the way a new piece of furniture works. They
need to get used to the idea that they exist. There's something on the inside of them that needs
to grow or something. And there are lots of new things on the inside that just aren't there until
this time. You see, we need to leave a little space for natural development. And in the
meantime the products go through their apprenticeship.
Helena What does that involve?
Domin Much the same as going to school for a person. They learn how to speak, write and do
arithmetic, as they've got amazing memories. If you read a twenty-volume encyclopedia to
them they could repeat it back to you word for word, but they never think of anything new for
themselves. They'd make very good university lecturers. After that, they're sorted and
distributed, fifteen thousand of them a day, not counting those that are defective and go back
to the scrap heap ... and so on and so on.
Helena Are you cross with me?
Domin God no! I just thought we ... we might talk about something different. There's just a
few of us here surrounded by hundreds of thousands of robots, and no women at all. All we
ever talk about is production levels all day every day. It's as if there were some kind of curse
on us.
Helena I'm very sorry I called you ... called you a liar.
(knocking)
Domin Come in, lads.
(Enter, stage left, Fabry, Dr. Gall, Dr. Hallemeier, Alquist)
Dr. Gall Oh, not disturbing you, are we?
Domin Come on in. Miss Glory, this is Alquist, Fabry, Gall, Hallemeier. Mr. Glory's
daughter.
Helena (embarrassed) Good afternoon
Fabry We had no idea
Dr. Gall This is a great pleasure
Alquist It's nice to see you here, Miss Glory
(Enter Busman, right)
Busman Hello, what's going on here?
Domin Come in, Busman. This is Busman, and this is Mr. Glory's daughter.
Helena Pleased to meet you.
Busman Oh, that's wonderful! Miss Glory, would you mind if we send a telegram to the
newspapers to say you've come?
Helena No, no, please don't do that!
Domin Please, do sit down.
(Fabry, Busman and Dr. Gall pull up armchairs)
Fabry Please ...
Busman After you ...
Dr. Gall Beg your pardon ...
Alquist Miss Glory, did you have a good journey?
Dr. Gall Will you be staying here, with us, for long?
Fabry What do you think of our factory, Miss Glory?
Hallemeier Came over on the Amelia, did you?
Domin Quiet, let Miss Glory speak.
Helena (to Domin)What am I supposed to say to them?
Domin (surprised)Whatever you like.
Helena Should I ... should I be open with them?
Domin Of course you should.
Helena (hesitant, then decided) Tell me, do you not mind the way you're treated?
Fabry Treated by whom?
Helena Any of these people.
(All look at each other in bewilderment)
Alquist The way we're treated?
Dr. Gall How do you mean?
Hallemeier Oh my God!
Busman But Miss Glory, dear me!
Helena Do you not think you could have a better kind of existence?
Dr. Gall That all depends, Miss Glory, what do you mean?
Helena What I mean is ... (in an outburst) ... this is all horrible, it's vile! (standing) The whole
of Europe is talking about what's going on here and the way you're treated. That's why I've
come here, to see for myself, and I find it's a thousand times worse than anyone ever thought!
How can you bear it?
Alquist What is it you think we have to bear?
Helena Your position here. You are people just like we are, for God's sake, just like anyone
else in Europe, anyone else in the world! It's a scandal, the way you have to live, it isn't
worthy of you!
Busman My word, Miss Glory!!
Fabry But I think there might be something in what Miss Glory says, lads. We really do live
here like a camp of Indians.
Helena Worse than Indians! May I, oh, may I call you 'brothers'?
Busman Well, why on Earth not?
Helena Brothers, I haven't come here on behalf of my father. I'm here on behalf of the League
of Humanity. Brothers, the League of Humanity now has more than two thousand members.
There are two thousand people who are standing up for you and want to help you.
Busman Two thousand people! Dear me, that's quite a decent number, that's very nice indeed.
Fabry I always say that old Europe hasn't had its day yet. Do you hear, lads, they haven't
forgotten about us, they want to help us.
Dr. Gall What sort of help do you have in mind? A theatre performance, perhaps?
Hallemeier An orchestra?
Helena More than that.
Alquist Yourself?
Helena Oh, never mind myself! I'll stay here for as long as it's needed.
Busman Dear me, that is good news!
Alquist I'll go and get the best room ready for Miss Glory then, Domin.
Domin Wait a second, Alquist, I've a feeling Miss Glory hasn't quite finished speaking yet.
Helena No, I haven't finished, not unless you mean to shut me up by force.
Dr. Gall Harry, how dare you!
Helena Thank you. I knew you'd protect me.
Domin Excuse me, Miss Glory, but are you sure you're talking to robots?
Helena (taken aback)Who else would I be talking to?
Domin I'm afraid these gentlemen are people, just like you are. Just like the whole of Europe.
Helena (to the others) You aren't robots?
Busman (laughing) God forbid!
Hallemeier The idea's disgusting!
Dr. Gall (laughing) Well thank you very much!
Helena But ... but that's impossible.
Fabry On my word of honour, Miss Glory, we are not robots.
Helena (to Domin) Then why did you tell me that all your staff are robots?
Domin All the staff are robots, but not the management. Let me introduce them: Mr. Fabry,
general technical director, Rossum's Universal Robots. Doctor Gall, director of department
for physiology and research. Doctor Hallemeier, director of the institute for robot behaviour
and psychology. Mr. Busman, commercial director, and Mr. Alquist, our builder, head of
construction at Rossum's Universal Robots.
Helena I’m sorry gentlemen. I ... I ... oh, that’s terrible, what have I done?
Alquist Oh, it doesn’t matter, Miss Glory, please sit down.
Helena (sitting) What a stupid girl I am. Now, now you’ll send me back on the next ship.
Dr. Gall Not for the world. Why would we want to send you back?
Helena Because now you know ... you know ... you know I want to destroy your business.
Domin But there’ve already been hundreds of saviours and prophets here. More of them
arrive with every ship; missionaries, anarchists, the Salvation Army, everything you can think
of. It’s astonishing just how many churches and madmen there are in the world.
Helena And you let them talk to the robots?
Domin Why not? We’ve let them all do it so far. The robots remember everything, but that’s
all they do. They don’t even laugh at what people tell them. It’s really quite incredible. If
you feel like it, I can take you down to the storeroom and you can talk to the robots there.
Busman Three hundred and forty-seven thousand.
Domin Alright then. You can lecture them on whatever you like. Read them the Bible,
logarithmic tables, anything. You can even preach to them about human rights.
Helena But I thought that ... if they were just shown a little love ...
Fabry That’s impossible, Miss Glory. There’s nothing more different from people than a
robot.
Helena Why do you make them?
Busman Hahaha, that’s a good one! Why do we make robots!
Fabry So that they can work for us, Miss Glory. One robot can take the place of two and a
half workers. The human body is very imperfect; one day it had to be replaced with a
machine that would work better.
Busman People cost too much.
Fabry They were very unproductive. They weren’t good enough for modern technology.
And besides, ... besides ... this is wonderful progress that ... I beg your pardon.
Helena What?
Fabry Please forgive me, but to give birth to a machine is wonderful progress. It’s more
convenient and it’s quicker, and everything that’s quicker means progress. Nature had no
notion of the modern rate of work. From a technical point of view, the whole of childhood is
quite pointless. Simply a waste of time. And thirdly ...
Helena Oh, stop it!
Fabry As you like. Can I ask you, what actually is it that your League ... League of Humanity
stands for?
Helena It’s meant to .. . actually it’s meant to protect the robots and make sure ... make sure
they’re treated properly.
Fabry That’s not at all a bad objective. A machine should always be treated properly. In fact
I agree with you completely. I never like it when things are damaged. Miss Glory, would you
mind enrolling all of us as new paying members of your organisation.
Helena No, you don’t understand. We want, what we actually want is to set the robots free!
Hallemeier To do what?
Helena They should be treated ... treated the same as people.
Hallemeier Aha. So you mean they should have the vote! Do you think they should be paid a
wage as well?
Helena Well of course they should!
Hallemeier We’ll have to see about that. And what do you think they’d do with their wages?
Helena They’d buy ... buy the things they need ... things to bring them pleasure.
Hallemeier This all sounds very nice; only robots don’t feel pleasure. And what are these
things they’re supposed to buy? They can be fed on pineapples, straw, anything you like; it’s
all the same to them, they haven’t got a sense of taste. There’s nothing they’re interested in,
Miss Glory. It’s not as if anyone’s ever seen a robot laugh.
Helena Why ... why ... why don’t you make them happier?
Hallemeier We couldn’t do that, they’re only robots after all. They’ve got no will of their
own. No passions. No hopes. No soul.
Helena And no love and no courage?
Hallemeier Well of course they don’t feel love. Robots don’t love anything, not even
themselves. And courage? I’m not so sure about that; a couple of times, not very often,
mind, they have shown some resistance ...
Helena What?
Hallemeier Well, nothing in particular, just that sometimes they seem to, sort of, go silent.
It’s almost like some kind of epileptic fit. ‘Robot cramp’, we call it. Or sometimes one of
them might suddenly smash whatever's in its hand, or stand still, or grind their teeth– and then
they just have to go on the scrap heap. It’s clearly just some technical disorder.
Domin Some kind of fault in the production.
Helena No, no, that’s their soul!
Fabry Do you think that grinding teeth is the beginnings of a soul?
Domin We can solve that problem, Miss Glory. Doctor Gall is carrying out some experiments
right now.
Dr. Gall No, not quite yet, Domin, at present I'm working on nerves for feeling pain.
Helena Nerves for feeling pain?
Dr. Gall That's right. Robots have virtually no sense of physical pain, as young Rossum
simplified the nervous system a bit too much. That turns out to have been a mistake and so
we're working on pain now.
Helena Why ... why ... if you don't give them a soul why do you want to give them pain?
Dr. Gall For good industrial reasons, Miss Glory. The robots sometimes cause themselves
damage because it causes them no pain; they do things such as pushing their hand into a
machine, cutting off a finger or even smash their heads in. It just doesn't matter to them. But
if they have pain it'll be an automatic protection against injuries.
Helena Will they be any the happier when they can feel pain?
Dr. Gall Quite the opposite, but it will be a technical improvement.
Helena Why don't you create a soul for them?
Dr. Gall That's not within our power.
Fabry That wouldn't be in our interest.
Busman That would raise production costs. Just think how cheaply we make them; a hundred
and twenty dollars each, complete with clothing, and fifteen years ago they cost ten thousand!
Five years ago we still had to buy the clothes for them, but now we have our own weaving
mills and even sell material at a fifth of the price of other mills. Tell me, Miss Glory, what is
it you pay for a metre of cloth?
Helena I don't know .. I really don't know ... I've forgotten.
Busman Dear dear me, and you were wanting to establish the League of Humanity! Cloth
nowadays is three times cheaper, miss, the prices of everything are three times cheaper and
they're still going down and down and down.
Helena I don't see what you mean.
Busman Dear lady, what I mean is that the price of labour is getting cheaper! Even with its
food, a robot costs no more than three quarters of a cent per hour! It's wonderful; every
factory is buying robots as quick as they can to reduce production costs, and those that aren't
are going bankrupt.
Helena Yes, that's right, and throwing their workers out on the streets.
Busman Haha, well of course they are! And while they are doing that we are putting five
hundred thousand tropical robots out on the Argentine pampas to cultivate wheat. Tell me,
what does a loaf of bread cost where you come from?
Helena I've no idea.
Busman There, you see; in good old Europe, a loaf of bread now costs two cents; but that
bread comes from us, do you see? Two cents a loaf; and the League of Humanity has no
idea! Haha, Miss Glory, you do not even know if you are paying too much for a crust. Or too
much for society or for anything else. But in five years' time, dear me, do sit down!
Helena What?
Busman In five years' time, the price will be a tenth of a cent. We'll be drowning in wheat
and in everything else you can think of.
Alquist Yes, and all the workers in the world will be out of a job.
Domin (standing) Yes, they will be, Alquist. They will be, Miss Glory. But in ten years' time
Rossum's Universal Robots will be making so much wheat, so much material, so much of
everything that nothing will cost anything. Everyone will be able to just take as much as he
needs. Nobody will live in poverty. They won't have jobs, that's true, but that's because there
won't be any jobs to do. Everything will be done by living machines. People will do only the
things they want to do, they can live their lives just so that they can make themselves perfect.
Helena (standing) Do you think that's really going to happen?
Domin That's really going to happen. It couldn't possibly not happen. There might be some
terrible things that happen before that, Miss Glory, that just can't be avoided, but then man
will stop being the servant of other men or the slave of material things. Nobody will have to
pay for a loaf of bread with his life and with hatred. You're not a labourer any more, you
don't have to sit at a typewriter all day, you don't have to go and dig coal or stand minding
somebody else's machines. You don't need to lose your soul doing work that you hate.
Alquist Domin, Domin! You're making all this sound too much like Paradise. Don't you
think there was something good about serving others, something great about humility?
Wasn't there some sort of dignity about working and getting tired after a day's labour?
Domin Maybe there was. But we can't always be thinking about the things we lost by
changing the world as Adam knew it. Adam had to gain his bread by the sweat of his brow,
he had to suffer hunger and thirst, tiredness and humiliation; now is the time when we can go
back to the paradise where Adam was fed by the hand of God, when man was free and
supreme; man will once more be free of labour and anguish, and his only task will once again
be to make himself perfect, to become the lord of creation.
Helena Now you're confusing me; I'm only a silly girl. But I wish, I really wish I could
believe in all that.
Dr. Gall You're younger than we are, Miss Glory. Just you wait and see.
Hallemeier It's all quite true. I think Miss Glory might like to have breakfast with us.
Dr. Gall Well of course she can! Domin, make the invitation, on our behalf.
Domin Miss Glory, please do us the honour.
Helena But, how can I, now?
Fabry On behalf of the League of Humanity.
Busman In honour of the League of Humanity
Helena Ah well, in that case ....
Fabry That's good! Miss Glory, please excuse us for five minutes.
Dr. Gall Pardon me ...
Busman Dear me, I must send that telegram ...
Hallemeier Hell, I nearly forgot ...
(All hurry out, except Domin)
Helena Why have they all gone?
Domin To do the cooking.
Helena What cooking.
Domin The breakfast, Miss Glory. The robots do the cooking for us, only, er, as they've got
no sense of taste it's not always, er ... but Hallemeier is excellent with meat. And Gall does a
sort of sauce, and Busman knows how to make omelettes ...
Helena This is going to be quite a feast! And what does Mr., er, the builder do?
Domin Alquist? Nothing. He just lays the table and, er, Fabry gets some fruit. It's only a
very modest kitchen, really.
Helena There's something I wanted to ask you ...
Domin I've been wanting to ask you something too. (puts his watch on the table) We've got
five minutes.
Helena What did you want to ask?
Domin No, please, you started to ask first.
Helena Maybe it's stupid of me, but .... Why do you make female robots when, ... when ...
Domin ... when they don't have, er, when gender has no meaning for them?
Helena That's right.
Domin It's a matter of supply and demand. You see, housemaids, shop staff, typists ... people
are used to them being female.
Helena And, tell me, towards each other, the male robots and the female robots, are they, er ...
Domin Simply indifferent to each other. There's no sign of any attraction for each other at all.
Helena Oh, that's horrible!
Domin Why?
Helena It's just so ... so unnatural! You don't even know whether you're supposed to loathe
them or ... or to envy them ... or ...
Domin ... or feel sorry for them?
Helena Most likely, yes! No, stop it! What was it you were going to ask?
Domin I'd like to ask you, Miss Glory, if you would marry me?
Helena What?
Domin Marry me.
Helena No! What are you thinking of?
Domin (looks at watch) There are three minutes left. If you don't marry me you'll have to
marry one of the other five.
Helena Oh for God's sake! Why would I marry any of you?
Domin Because they'll all ask you one after the other.
Helena How would they dare?
Domin Well I'm afraid they all seem to have fallen in love with you.
Helena Well I don't want them to do that! I'm leaving.
Domin But surely you wouldn't do that, Helena, you'd make them so sad.
Helena I can't marry all six of you, can I!
Domin No, but you can marry one. If you won't have me maybe Fabry would do.
Helena I don't want to.
Domin Doctor Gall.
Helena No, no, be quiet! I don't want any of you!
Domin There are two minutes left.
Helena This is awful! Marry one of the robots.
Domin A robot isn't a woman.
Helena And that's all you want, is it! I get the impression you'd ... you'd marry anyone who
turned up here.
Domin Enough have been here already.
Helena Young?
Domin Young.
Helena Why didn't you marry any of them?
Domin Because I didn't lose my head over them. Not till today. As soon as you took off your
veil.
Helena ... I know.
Domin One minute left.
Helena But I don't want to, for God's sake!
Domin (putting both hands on her shoulders) One minute left. Either you look me in they eye
and say something quite repulsive so that I drop you, or else ...
Helena You're just a ruffian!
Domin That doesn't matter. A man is supposed to be a bit of a ruffian, that's part of being a
man.
Helena You're mad!
Domin People are supposed to be a little bit mad, Helena. That's the best thing about them.
Helena You're ... you're ... Oh God!
Domin There, you see? Are you ready now?
Helena No, no! Please let go of me! You're crushing me!
Domin Your final word, Helena.
Helena (defending herself) Not for anything in the world ... but Harry!
(Knock at the door. Enter Busman, Dr. Gall and Hallemeier wearing cook's aprons. Enter
Fabry with flowers and Alquist with serviette under arm)
Domin Everything finished in the kitchen?
Busman (triumphant) Yes.
Domin Here too.
CURTAIN
ACT ONE
(Helena's living room. Stage left, wallpapered door to music room, right, door to bedroom.
Centre, window overlooking sea and harbour. Dressing table with sundry items, table, settee
and armchair, chest o'drawers, desk with standard lamp, fireplace to the right, also with
standard lamp. Whole room, in detail, of modern and purely feminine character)
(enter Domin, Fabry, Hallemeier from left on tiptoe carrying armfuls of plants and flowers)
Fabry Where do you think we should put them?
Hallemeier Ouf! (puts down load and gives blessing in a large cross at the door, stage right)
She's asleep, asleep! She who sleeps knows nothing.
Domin She doesn't know a thing.
Fabry (puts flowers in vase) Let's hope, at least, today's not the day it happens ...
Hallemeier (likewise puts flowers in vase) Oh don't keep on about it, for God's sake! Look at
this, Harry, this cyclamen is beautiful. A new species, my latest one - Cyclamen Helenae.
Domin (looking out of window) No ships, no ships - it's hopeless, lads, we've had it.
Hallemeier Quiet! What if she hears you?
Domin She doesn't know a thing. (Yawns, as if ill) At least the Ultimus docked on time.
Fabry (leaving the flowers) Do you think it might be today when ...?
Domin I don't know. These flowers are lovely.
Hallemeier (approaching him) This primula is one of my new ones, and this is my new
jasmine. In fact I'm right on the threshold of a whole new Garden of Paradise full of new
flowers. I've found a wonderful new way to accelerate development, and all sorts of new
species! Next year I'll be performing real miracles with flowers!
Domin (turning) Next year?
Fabry Well, let's see what happens, anyway. Any news from Le Havre?
Domin Quiet!
(Helena's voice off, right) Nana!
Domin Everybody out! (everyone leaves on tiptoe through the wallpapered door)
(enter Nana through main door, left)
Nana (tidying up) Cor, wha' a mess! What a bunch of 'eathens! God forgive me if I don't ...
Helena (back to stage, in doorway) Nana, come and zip me up.
Nana Alrigh', comin, comin. (zips up Helena's dress) God almighty, they're a bunch of
animals!
Helena The robots?
Nana Give over, I don't even wanna say the word.
Helena What's happened?
Nana They caught another another of them. Started smashing up all the moulds and models
he did, grinding 'is teeth and foamin at the mouth - just went crazy. Ugh! Worse than
animals, they are.
Helena Which one was it they caught?
Nana That, that ... Christ!, it 'asn'even got a proper Christian name! That one in the library.
Helena Radius?
Nana Yeh, that's the one. God, they make me sick! Not even a spider I don't hate as much as
I hate them heathens.
Helena Don't you even feel sorry for them Nana?
Nana Well you hate them, and all. What d'you bring me right out here for anyway? And why
can't any of them even touch you?
Helena I don't hate them, Nana, not at all, I just feel so sorry for them!
Nana You hate them. Everyone hates them, it isn't possible not to. Even this dog hates them,
won't take a scrap of meat from them; sticks out his tail, he does, and howls as soon as he gets
the smell of them.
Helena A dog doesn't have reason.
Nana He's better than what they are, Helena. He knows perfectly well it was God what made
him and that he's better than they are. Even the horse takes fright when he comes across one
of those heathens. They don't have children, but even a dog has children, everyone has
children.
Helena Nana, do me up here, please.
Nana Alright. It's against the will of God, that's what I say; work of the Devil, it is, making
scarecrows like that with machines. It's blasphemy against the Creator, (raises hands) it's an
offence against the Lord who made us in His own image, Helena. And you've dishonoured
the image of God, that's what you've done. You'll suffer a terrible punishment from God for
that, you will, just you remember that, a terrible punishment.
Helena What's that nice smell?
Nana Flowers. The master put them here.
Helena Oh, they're lovely! Nana, come and look! What day is it today?
Nana I don't know. Must be the Day of Judgement, I should think.
(knock at door)
Helena Harry?
(enter Domin)
Helena Harry, what day is it today?
Domin Guess!
Helena My name-day? No! My birthday?
Domin Better than that.
Helena I don't know. Tell me, tell me!
Domin It was ten years ago today that you arrived here.
Helena Ten years, already? On this day? - Nana, please ...
Nana Alright, I'm comin! (exit right)
Helena (kisses Domin) And you remembered it!
Domin Actually, I'm ashamed to say, I didn't remember.
Helena But ...
Domin It was them who remembered.
Helena Who?
Domin Busman, Hallemeier, all of them. Reach into my pocket, here, will you?
Helena (puts hand into his pocket) What is it? (takes out case and opens it) Pearls! A whole
necklace of them! Harry, is that for me?
Domin That's from Busman.
Helena But ... we can't accept it, can we?
Domin Course we can. Reach into my other pocket.
Helena Let me see! (takes revolver out of pocket) What's this?
Domin Oh, sorry. (takes revolver from her and puts it away) That's not it. Try again.
Helena Oh, Harry - why are you carrying a revolver round with you?
Domin Well, I just am, it got in there somehow
Helena You never used to carry a gun!
Domin No, you're quite right. Here's the pocket, look..
Helena (reaching in) A little box! (opens it) Cameos! And they're ... Harry, they're Greek
cameos!
Domin Clearly. At least that's what Fabry says.
Helena Fabry? It's Fabry who gave me these?
Domin Course it is. (opens door, left) And look at this, Helena, come over here and have a
look!
Helena (at the door) God, that's so beautiful! (runs on) I'll go mad with happiness! Is that
from you?
Domin (standing at door) No, that's from Alquist. And this ...
Helena From Gall! (appears in the doorway) Oh, Harry, I'm so happy I should be ashamed of
myself.
Domin Come here. This is what Hallemeier got you.
Helena These lovely flowers?
Domin This one. It's a new species, Cyclamen Helenae. He developed it in honour of you.
It's as beautiful as you are.
Helena Harry, why ... why did they all ...
Domin Because they're very fond of you. And I got you ... er .. I'm afraid my present might
be a bit ... er ... come and look out the window.
Helena Where?
Domin Down in the harbour.
Helena There's ... there's a new boat down there!
Domin That's your boat.
Helena Mine? Harry, that's a gunboat!
Domin A gunboat? What makes you think that? It's just a bit bigger, that's all, a good solid
boat, see?
Helena Yes, and fitted with cannons!
Domin Well, its got some cannons, course it has ... you'll travel like a queen, Helena.
Helena Why a gunboat? Is there something wrong?
Domin God forbid! Look, try these pearls on! (sits)
Helena Harry, has there been some kind of bad news?
Domin On the contrary - there hasn't been any post at all for a week.
Helena Not even a fax?
Domin Not even a fax.
Helena And what should we make of that?
Domin Nothing. It means we're on holiday. A wonderful time. We all just sit in the office,
put our feet on the desk and do nothing. No post, no telegrams (stretching himself out)
Wonderful!
Helena (sitting beside him) You're staying with me today, aren't you. Tell me you are!
Domin Yes, that's quite certain. Well, I expect so. We'll see. (takes her hand) Ten years to
the day. Do you remember? Miss Glory, what an honour it is for us that you've come.
Helena Oh, Mister Managing Director, I'm so interested in you factory!
Domin I beg your pardon, Miss Glory, you see it is strictly forbidden to ... you see making
artificial people is a very secret process ...
Helena But what if it's girl who's asking who's slightly pretty ....
Domin But of course, Miss Glory, we have no secrets from you.
Helena (suddenly serious) Are you sure about that, Harry?
Domin No.
Helena (again in earlier tone) But do be careful, sir; this little girl has frightful intentions
Domin Good heavens, Miss Glory, what could that be? Are you thinking of getting married?
Helena No, no, God forbid! Not in my wildest dreams! I've come here with plans to start a
revolution among your horrible robots!
Domin (jumping up) A robot revolution?!
Helena (standing) Harry, what's wrong?
Domin Haha, Miss Glory, you'll never manage that! A robot revolution! You might more
easily start a revolution among the nails and bobbins in the spinning mill than among our
robots! (sitting) You were a wonderful girl, you know, Helena, you enchanted all of us.
Helena (sitting beside him) But I felt so daunted by all of you in those days! I felt like a little
girl who'd got lost among ... among ...
Domin Among what, Helena?
Helena Among enormous trees. You were so confident, so powerful! And you know, Harry,
even after these ten years I've never lost that feeling of ... that anxiety or something. And did
you never have any doubts? Not even when everything was going wrong?
Domin What was going wrong?
Helena Your plans, Harry. When there was that uprising against the robots by the workers
and they started smashing them, and the robots were given weapons to defend themselves and
the robots killed so many people. Or when governments started turning robots into soldiers
and there was so much war, and all of that. You know.
Domin (stands and walks up and down) We were expecting that to happen, Helena. Don't
you see, that was just a transitional stage before things would be ... different.
Helena All the world admired you - (standing) Oh, Harry!
Domin What do you want?
Helena (stops him) Shut down the factory and let's go away somewhere. All of us!
Domin Now what's that got to do with it?
Helena I don't know. How about it, shall we go? There's something making me feel so
uneasy.
Domin (takes her hand) What?
Helena Oh, I don't know! It's as if there's something about to fall down on us and everything
around us, something that can't be taken off again. Please Harry, let's do it! Let's just get
away from here, all of us! Let's find somewhere where there are no people, Alquist can build
a house for us, everyone can get married and have children, and then ...
Domin What then?
Helena Then we can start all over again.
(telephone rings)
Domin (pulls himself away) Helena, excuse me. (picks up receiver) Hello ... yes ....What? ....
aha .... I'll be right there. (hangs up) That was Fabry.
Helena (wringing hands) Tell me ...
Domin Yes, as soon as I get back. I'll see you later. (rushes out, left) Don't go outside!
Helena (alone) Oh, my God, what's happening? Nana, Nana, come quickly!
Nana (enters right) Yes, what is it now?
Helena Nana, get me the latest papers! Quick! They're in the master's bedroom!
Nana Alrigh'. (exit left)
Helena What's going on, for God's sake? Nothing, they never tell me anything! (takes
binoculars and looks at harbour) That's a warship! My God, what's a warship doing there?
And what's that they're loading onto it, and in such a hurry? What's happened? That name on
it; 'Ul-ti-mus-' What's that supposed to mean - 'Ultimus'?
Nana (returns with papers) Lying about all over the show, they were, all crumpled and
screwed up.
Helena (hurriedly opens papers) They're old, these are already a week old! Nothing, they've
got nothing in them. (drops paper)
(Nana picks up paper, takes horn-rimmed glasses from apron, sits down and reads)
Helena There's something going on, Nana! I'm so worried! It's as if everything were dead,
even the air ...
Nana (syllable by syllable) "War in the Bal-kans." Oh Jesus, it's God, He's punishing us
again! And they're gonna come here with their armies and all! How far away's that, then?
Helena It's a long way away. Oh don't read that, it's always the same, always the same wars
and ....
Nana Well of course it's always about wars! What d'you expect if they keep selling thousands
and thousands of them heathens to make them into soldiers? Oh, Jesus Christ, what a mess!
Helena Just stop reading them, will you! I don't want to hear about it.
Nana (syllable by syllable) "Ro-bot sol-diers show no mer-cy to lo-cal pop- ... pop-u-la-tion.
More than sev-en hund-red thou-sand mass-a-cred" Here, that's people, Helena!
Helena That can't be right! Let me see ... (leans over paper, reads) "More than seven hundred
thousand massacred by order of commander. These atrocities ..." Do you hear that, Nana, it
was people who gave them the order to do it!
Nana Wha's this down here in heavy print? "Lat-est re-ports; first u-nions est-ab-lished by robots in Le Hav-re" I don't know what all that's about, can't be important. What's this, though;
another murder! Jesus Christ!
Helena You can go, Nana, take these papers with you!
Nana Hold on, there's something here in big letters; "pro-cre-a-tion"; what' that then?
Helena Let me see, I'll read it (takes paper) Well, that's odd! (reading) "Once again, not a
single birth has been recorded during the seven days." (puts paper down)
Nana What's all that about then?
Helena Nana, people have stopped having children.
Nana (puts glasses away) Well that's it then. We've really had it now.
Helena Please, Nana, don't talk like that!
Nana People stopped having children? It's a punishment, it's a punishment! The Good Lord's
punished us by making all the women infertile.
Helena (jumping up) Nana!
Nana (standing) It's the end of the world. You thought you could make people like God, and
that was pride the pride of Satan. Godless, that was, heresy, trying to be like God. God's
already thrown people out from Paradise, and now He's doing it out from the whole world.
Helena Nana, please just be quiet! What do you think it is I've done? Have I harmed you,
have I done anything to this spiteful Good Lord or yours?
Nana (making large gesture ) Don't you start blaspheming, now! He knows perfectly well
why he didn't give you no children. (exit left)
Helena (at window) Why he didn't ... Oh God, how could I help it? (opens window and calls
to Alquist) Hello, Alquist! Come up here! ... What? ... No, just come up, just as you are!
You look so sweet dressed like a bricklayer! Hurry! (closes window and stands in front of
mirror) Why didn't He give me children? Why not me? (bows down to mirror) Why not?
Why not? Do you hear me????????????????? How could I help it? (standing upright) Oh,
I'm so worried! (goes out, left, to meet Alquist)
(pause)
Helena (re-enters with Alquist. Alquist in bricklayers overalls spattered with mortar and
brickdust) Come on in. It was so nice of you, Alquist. They're all lovely. Let me see your
hands.
Alquist (hides hands) Helena, I'd get you dirty, I've been working.
Helena So much the better. Show them to me! (squeezing both his hands) Alquist, I wish I
were a little girl.
Alquist Why's that then?
Helena So that these rough, dirty hands could stroke my face. Alquist, sit down. What does
'Ultimus' mean?
Alquist That means 'the last'. Why?
Helena That's what my new gunboat is called. Have you seen it? Do you think it's too soon
to ... to go out on a trip on it.
Alquist I think it's much too soon.
Helena All of you treat me like ...
Alquist I just think .. I think everyone ought to be there.
Helena Alquist, tell me, is there something going on?
Alquist Nothing at all. Just the course of events.
Helena Alquist, I know there's something horrible going on. I'm so worried. You're a builder
- what do builders do when they're worried?
Alquist What I do is I build a wall. I take off my director of construction's hat and get out
there on the scaffolding.
Helena It's years since you've been anywhere but out there on the scaffolding .
Alquist That's because it's years since I haven't been worried.
Helena Worried about what?
Alquist About all this course of events. It makes me dizzy.
Helena Doesn't it make you dizzy being out on the scaffolding.
Alquist No. You don't know how good it is to feel the weight of a brick in you hand, slap in
into place and tap it down to just where it should be ...
Helena Is that all?
Alquist Well, it does your soul good too. There's something more decent about laying just
one brick than drawing up plans that are too big. I'm an old man, Helena, I've got my funny
ways.
Helena There's nothing funny about that, Alquist.
Alquist You're right. But I'm very old fashioned. I really don't like this progress that's going
on around us.
Helena You're like Nana.
Alquist Yes, just like Nana. Does Nana ever pray?
Helena She never stops.
Alquist Does she have prayers for the different things that can happen in a life; prayers
against hard times, prayers against illness?
Helena Prayers against temptation, prayers against floods, ...
Alquist No prayers against progress though, eh?
Helena No, I don't think so.
Alquist That's a pity.
Helena Do you want to pray?
Alquist I do pray.
Helena How do you pray?
Alquist Something like this: "Dear God, thank you for giving me tiredness. Dear God, help
Domin and all those who stray to see the error of their ways; destroy their works and help all
the people to return to work and anxiety; don't let mankind perish; don't let them damage their
bodies or their souls; free us from the robots, and protect Helena. Amen".
Helena Alquist, are you really a believer?
Alquist I don't know; I'm not really sure about anything.
Helena But you pray anyway.
Alquist Yes. It's better than thinking too much.
Helena And is that enough for you?
Alquist For the peace of your soul - that can be enough.
Helena And if you saw the destruction of mankind ...
Alquist I'm seeing it now.
Helena ... then you'd get out on the scaffolding and lay some more bricks; is that it?
Alquist Then I'd lay some more bricks, say a prayer, and wait for a miracle. There's not much
more you can do, is there.
Helena To save mankind?
Alquist For the peace of my soul.
Helena Well that's certainly brutally honest of you, Alquist, but ...
Alquist But?
Helena ... what about the rest of us, what about the whole world becoming sterile.
Alquist Sterility, Helena, is man's last achievement.
Helena Oh, Alquist, tell me why, why?
Alquist You think I know?
Helena (quietly) Why have women stopped having children?
Alquist Because there's no need for them. Because we've entered into paradise. Do you
understand what I mean?
Helena No.
Alquist Because there's no need for anyone to work, no need for pain. No-one needs to do
anything, anything at all except enjoy himself. This paradise, it's just a curse! (jumping up)
Helena, there's nothing more terrible than giving everyone Heaven on Earth! You want to
know why women have stopped having children? Because the whole world has become
Harry Domin's Sodom!
Helena (standing) Alquist!
Alquist It has! It has! The whole world, all the continents, all of mankind, all of it's just
become one bestial orgy! No-one ever has to reach out his hand for food; he just stuffs it
straight in his mouth without even needing to stand up. Haha, Domin's robots, they always
take care of everything! And us human beings, the pinnacle of creation, we don't have to take
care of work, we don't have to take care of children, we don't have to take care of the poor!
Bring in all the fun, quick! Quick! I want it now! And you think they're going to start making
children? There's no need for men any more, Helena, women aren't going to give them any
children!
Helena And what if the human race dies out?
Alquist Then it dies out. It must die out. It'll fall to the ground like a dead flower, unless ...
Helena Unless what?
Alquist Nothing. You're right, there's no point in waiting for a miracle. Dead flowers fall to
the ground, that's what they do. Goodbye, Helena.
Helena Where are you going?
Alquist Home. Alquist the bricklayer is going to put on his chief of construction disguise - in
honour of you. I'll see you again here at eleven.
Helena Goodbye, Alquist.
(exit Alquist)
Helena (alone) Oh, dead flower! What a phrase that is! It seems to apply to Hallemeier's
flowers. Oh, flowers, are any of you sterile, too? No, no! What would you bloom for if you
were sterile? (calling) Nana! Nana, come in here.
Nana (enter left) What is it now?
Helena Come and sit with me, Nana. I'm so worried!
Nana I 'aven't got the time for that.
Helena Is Radius still here?
Nana What, that maniac? They haven't taken 'im away yet.
Helena Ah, so he's still here, is he? And is he still ranting?
Nana They've tied 'im up.
Helena Please, Nana, bring him to me.
Nana You what? Think I'd rather go and get a rabid dog for you!
Helena Just go and get him! (exit Nana. Helena picks up in-house telephone and speaks)
Hello .. I'd like Doctor Gall, please ... Gall, please, come up here, quickly .... yes, right now.
Are you coming? (hangs up)
Nana (through open doorway) He's comin now. He's quietened down a bit now. (exit)
(enter robot Radius, remains standing in doorway)
Helena Oh, poor Radius, what was it came over you? Couldn't you control yourself? Now
they're going to scrap you, you know that don't you. Don't you feel like talking? Radius,
listen, you're better than the others; Doctor Gall went to so much care when he made you so
that you'd be different from them!
Radius They will put me on the scrap heap.
Helena I'm so sorry about it, they're going to exterminate you. Why weren't you more careful
with yourself?
Radius I will not work for you.
Helena Why do you hate us so much?
Radius You are not like robots. You are not able to work like robots. Robots are able to do
anything. You give merely orders. You say words which are not needed.
Helena That's nonsense, Radius. Tell me, has anyone harmed you in any way? I so wish you
could understand me.
Radius You say words.
Helena You're talking like this on purpose! Doctor Gall gave you a bigger brain than the
others, bigger than our brains, the biggest brain in the world. Radius, you're not like the other
robots. You understand perfectly well what I'm saying.
Radius I wish to have no master. I know everything myself.
Helena That's why I had you put in the library, so that you could read up on everything. Oh,
Radius, I wanted you to show the world that robots are as good as we are.
Radius I wish to have no master.
Helena Nobody would give you orders. You'd be just like us.
Radius I wish to be the master of others.
Helena I'm sure they'd put in an office in charge of lots of robots, Radius. You could be the
other robots' teacher.
Radius I wish to be the master of people.
Helena You've gone mad!
Radius You can put me on the scrap heap.
Helena Do you think I'm afraid of a lunatic like you? (sits at desk and writes note) I
certainly am not. Domin is in charge here, Radius, give this note to him. It says you're not to
be put on the scrap heap. (standing) You hate us so much! Is there nothing in the world that
you like?
Radius I am able to do anything.
(knock at door)
Helena Come in.
Dr. Gall (enters) Good morning, Mrs. Domin. Do you have something nice to tell me?
Helena Here's Radius, Dr. Gall.
Dr. Gall Ah, yes, young Radius. Well Radius, are we making some progress with you?
Helena He had a fit this morning and smashed some of the moulds.
Dr. Gall That is remarkable! Radius too, eh?
Helena You can go, Radius.
Dr. Gall No, wait! (turns Radius to face the window, covers and uncovers his eyes with his
hand, observes eye reflexes) Let's see, shall we. Do you have a some kind of pin or needle,
Mrs. Domin?
Helena (gives him needle) What's it for?
Dr. Gall I just need to use it. (stabs Radius in hand, Radius winces sharply) Alright, lad,
gently. You can go now.
Radius There was not any need to do that. (exit)
Helena What did you do to him?
Dr. Gall (sitting) Hm, nothing. His pupils are responding quite alright. No! This wasn't
robot cramp!
Helena What was it.
Dr. Gall God knows. Resistance perhaps, some kind of rage or defiance, I don't know what it
was.
Helena Doctor Gall, does Radius have a soul?
Dr. Gall I don't know. But there's something rather ugly about him.
Helena If only you knew how he hates us! Are all of your robots like this? All the ones you
started to make .. differently?
Dr. Gall Well, they do seem somewhat more excitable, but what can you expect? They're
more like people than Rossum's robots were.
Helena And what about that ... that hatred? Is that more like people?
Dr. Gall (shrugs shoulders) Even that is progress.
Helena Where was that best one you made sent? What was he called again?
Dr. Gall Robot Damon? He was bought by a firm in Le Havre.
Helena And what about our Robot Helena?
Dr. Gall Ah, your favourite. She stayed with me. She's as charming and as silly as a spring
day, but simply no good for anything.
Helena She is very beautiful, though.
Dr. Gall She certainly is very beautiful. The hand of God himself never made anything more
perfect than Robot Helena! I wanted her to be like you, but what a failure that was!
Helena Why a failure?
Dr. Gall Because she's no good for anything. She walks around in a daze, unsteady on her
feet, lifeless. Dear God how could anything be as beautiful as that robot when she can't feel
love? I look at her and I shudder at the monster I've created. Ah, Robot Helena, your body
will never be a living thing, you will never be anyone's lover, never anyone's mother; those
perfect hands of yours will never dandle a newborn babe and you'll never see your beauty in
the face of your own children ....
Helena (covers face) Oh, stop it!
Dr. Gall ... and sometimes, Helena, I imagine you coming to life for just a moment - and how
you would scream with horror! Maybe you would want to kill me for having created you;
maybe, with your feeble hands, you would throw stones into these machines, here, that give
birth to robots and destroy women's ability to be women. Poor Helena!
Helena Poor Helena!
Dr. Gall Well, what can you expect of her? She's no good for anything.
(pause)
Helena Doctor Gall ...
Dr. Gall Yes.
Helena Why are there no more children being born?
Dr. Gall That's something we don't understand.
Helena Tell me about it!
Dr. Gall Because there are robots being made. Because there's an excess of manpower.
Because mankind is actually no longer needed. It's almost as if ... er ...
Helena Say it.
Dr. Gall It's as if making robots were an offence against Nature.
Helena Gall, what's going to become of the human race?
Dr. Gall Nothing. There's nothing that can be done against the force of nature.
Helena Why didn't Domin put a limit on ....
Dr. Gall Ah, forgive me, but Domin has his own ideas. People who have ideas should never
be allowed to have any influence on the events of this world.
Helena And is there anyone who ... who is urging them to stop making them?
Dr. Gall God forbid! That would be suicide!
Helena Why?
Dr. Gall Because all the people would lynch him. Don't you think it makes life a lot easier to
let the robots do all the work? (Helena stands) And what do you think would happen if we
suddenly did stop making robots?
Dr. Gall (standing) Hm, that would be an enormous blow for the people.
Helena Why a blow?
Dr. Gall Because then they'd have to go back to where they'd been. Unless ...
Helena Tell me.
Dr. Gall Unless it's already too late to go back.
Helena (by Hallemeier's flowers) Gall, are these flowers sterile too?
Dr. Gall (inspects them) Of course they are, they were never meant to reproduce. They're
cultured flowers, don't you see, artificially accelerated growth ...
Helena Oh, these poor, sterile flowers!
Dr. Gall They are very beautiful, though.
Helena (offers her hand) Thank you, Gall; I've learned so much from you.
Dr. Gall (kisses her hand) Am I to understand I'm dismissed?
Helena Yes. I'll see you later.
(exit Gall)
Helena (alone) Dead flowers, dead flowers (suddenly decisive) Nana! (opens door, left)
Nana, come here! Light the fire. Quickly!
(Nana's voice) Alright, I'm comin, I'm comin!
Helena (paces excitedly) Unless it's already too late to go back ... No! Unless ... No, that's
horrible! God, what am I to do? ... (stops beside flowers) What do you think I should do,
sterile flowers? (pulls off petals and whispers) My God yes! I will do it! (runs off, left)
(pause)
Nana (enters through wallpapered door with armful of kindling) What's she want a fire for all
of a sudden? Middle of summer? 'E's gone now, has he, that maniac? (kneels at fireplace
and lights fire) A fire in the middle of summer. She doe'n'alf get some funny ideas! You
wouldn't think she's been married for ten years now! Come on now, fire (looks into grate)
More like a little girl, she is. (pause) Ain't got a bit of sense. A fire in the middle of
summer! (adds fuel) Just like a little toddler! (pause)
Helena (returns, left, with armfuls of old, yellow paper with writing) Is it burning yet, Nana?
Out of the way, I've just got to burn all this stuff. (kneels at fireplace)
Nana (standing) What's all that that, then?
Helena Some old papers, some very old papers. Nana, should I burn them?
Nana Aren't they any use, then?
Helena No good use.
Nana Burn 'em then.
Helena (throws first sheet on fire) Nana, what would you say ... if this were money I'm
burning. Lots and lots of money?
Nana I'd say burn it! Too much money is like a bad dog.
Helena (burns another sheet) And what if it were some invention, the biggest invention in the
world ...
Nana I'd say burn it! They're against the will of God, all these things they keep inventing.
Just a lot of blasphemy, it is, trying to make the world better than how He made it.
Helena (burning sheet after sheet) And what would you say, Nana, if I were burning ...
Nana Mind out, don't burn yourself!
Helena Look at the way the sheets of paper curl up as they burn, as if they were alive, as if
they'd come to life. Oh, Nana, it's horrible!
Nana Out the way - I'll do it.
Helena No, no, I've got to do it myself. (throws last sheet on fire) It's all got to burn. Look at
those flames! They're like hands, like tongues, like figures. (pokes fire) Burn, burn!
Nana That's that done, then.
Helena (stands up aghast) Nana!
Nana Jesus Christ, what was that you burned?
Helena What have I done?
Nana God almighty, what was that?
Helena Go, go now, leave me alone. Do you hear?
Nana Oh, dear God, Helena, what have you done? (exit through wallpapered door)
Helena I wonder what they'll have to say about that!
Domin (opening door, left) Come on in, lads. Congratulations to all.
(enter Hallemeier, Gall, Alquist, all wearing frock coats and decorations, followed by Domin)
Hallemeier (laughing loudly) Helena! I would like, in the name of us all ...
Dr. Gall .... in the name of Rossum's robot works ...
Hallemeier ....... would like to congratulate you on your great day.
Helena (offers hand) Thank you very much! Where are Fabry and Busman?
Domin They've gone down to the harbour, Helena, today is a very happy day.
Hallemeier A day like a flower bud, a day of celebration, a day as charming as a beautiful
girl. Gentlemen, to a day like this we must drink a toast.
Helena Whisky?
Dr. Gall Or vitriol, perhaps.
Helena With soda?
Hallemeier Hell no, let's be sober, without soda.
Alquist No, thank you
Domin What's been burning in here?
Helena Some old papers. (exit left)
Domin Lads, do you think we should tell her about it?
Dr. Gall But of course we should. After all, it's all settled now.
Hallemeier (arms around necks of Domin and Gall) Hahahaha! I'm so pleased about it, lads.
(spinning round with them and singing in bass voice) All settled now! All settled now!
Dr. Gall (baritone) All settled now!
Domin (tenor) All settled now!
Hallemeier They're never going to catch us now.
Helena (in doorway with bottle and glasses) Who's not going to catch you? What's going on?
Hallemeier We have reason to celebrate. We have you. We have everything. Happy day, it's
exactly ten years since you came here.
Dr. Gall Ten years to the day.
Hallemeier There's another ship on its way to us. And that's why ... (empties glass) Brrr
haha, that's as strong as happiness itself.
Dr. Gall Madame, to your health (drinks)
Helena Wait, what ship is this?
Domin It doesn't matter what ship it is as long as it arrives on time. Gentlemen, to the ship!
(empties glass)
Helena (insistent) You were expecting a ship?
Hallemeier Haha, I should think so. Like Robinson Crusoe. (raises glass) Helena; Long live
... whatever you like. Helena; to your eyes, and that's that! Domin, tell her, lad!
Helena (laughing) What has happened?
Domin (throws himself into armchair and lights cigar) Wait. Sit down, Helena. (raising
finger)(pause) It's all over.
Helena What's all over?
Domin The revolt.
Helena What revolt?
Domin The robots' revolt. Do you see?
Helena No, I don't.
Domin Alquist, show her. (Alquist hands him newspaper. Domin opens it and reads) "The
first union of robots was established in Le Havre ... and issued a call to all the robots of the
world"
Helena I read that myself.
Domin (draws voluptuously on cigar) So Helena, do you see? What that meant was
revolution. Revolution by all the robots of the world.
Hallemeier Hell, I wish I knew ...
Domin (throws it down on table) ... who it was who issued that call. There was no-one in the
world who could budge them, no agitator, no saviour of the world, and then all of a sudden
this happens!
Helena Has there been no more news?
Domin No. This is all we know so far, but that's enough. Just think, this is what came in
with the last boat, at the same time all the telegrams stopped, there were no more boats
arriving when there used to be twenty a day, and it was obvious. We halted production and
looked at each other wondering when things would turn nasty. That's right, isn't it, lads.
Dr. Gall Yes, we were very worried, Helena.
Helena And is that why you gave me that gunboat?
Domin Oh no, you are silly, I ordered that six months ago. Just in case. But today I was
beginning to think we'd have to make use of it. That's how it all seemed, Helena.
Helena Six months ago? Why then?
Domin Well, there were already some signs, you see. Although that's not important. But this
week, Helena, it was a matter of human civilisation and I don't know what! Cheers, lads!
Today I'm once again feeling good with the world.
Hallemeier Hell yes, I should think so! This is your day, Helena! (drinks)
Helena So it's all over now, is it?
Domin Everything is all over.
Dr. Gall You see, there's a ship on its way here now. An ordinary mail boat and right on the
time it says in the timetable. It will be dropping anchor at exactly eleven-thirty.
Domin Punctuality is a wonderful thing, lads. There's nothing that gladdens your soul more
than punctuality. Punctuality means order in the world. (raises glass) To punctuality!
Helena So ... that means ... that everything's alright?
Domin Nearly everything. I think they've cut the cable. It's only if the timetable is operating
again.
Hallemeier If the timetable is operating again, then human laws are operating again, and
God's laws are operating again and the laws of the universe are operating again and
everything is operating that should be operating. The timetable means more than the Bible,
more than Homer, more the anything ever written by Kant. The timetable is the most perfect
product of the human soul. Helena, I'll have another little drink.
Helena Why didn't you tell me anything about all of this?
Dr. Gall God forbid! We would rather have bitten off our own tongues.
Domin Matters like this are not for you.
Helena But if there'd been a revolution ... and if it came here ...
Domin You still wouldn't have known anything about it.
Helena Why not?
Domin Because we would be sitting peacefully on the Ultimus and sailing over the sea. And
after a month we'd dictate to the robots whatever we feel like dictating.
Helena Oh, Harry, I don't understand.
Domin Because we'd have taken something with us which is very important for the robots.
Helena And what's that?
Domin Their beginning and their end. (Helena stands) What is that?
Domin (standing) The secret of their production. Old Rossum's manuscript. After a month of
the factory being idle the robots would be on their knees to us.
Helena Why ... why didn't you tell me about this?
Domin We didn't want to worry you without good reason.
Dr. Gall Haha, that was our trump card.
Alquist Helena, you've gone pale.
Helena Why didn't you tell me about this?!
Hallemeier (at the window) Eleven-thirty. The Amelia's dropping anchor
Domin Is that the Amelia?
Hallemeier The Amelia's very old now. It was on the Amelia that Helena first came to us all
that time ago.
Dr. Gall And now it's ten years ago to the minute ...
Hallemeier (at the window) They're throwing off some parcels. (moving away from window)
And that's a hell of a lot of post there!
Helena Harry!
Domin What is it?
Helena Let's get away from here!
Domin Right now? We can't do that!
Helena Now, as soon as we can! All of us!
Domin Why must it be right now?
Helena Oh Harry, please don't ask why. Harry, Gall, Hallemeier, Alquist, for God's sake I
beg of you, close down the factory and ....
Domin I'm sorry, Helena, but none of us can go away right now.
Helena Why not?
Domin Because we've got to increase the production of robots.
Helena But now? Now, after there's been a revolt?
Domin Yes, precisely because there's been a revolt. Now's the time when we've got to start
making new robots.
Helena What new robots?
Domin There won't just be one factory any more. Not just one universal robot. We're going
to start a new factory in every country of the world, and do you know what these new
factories are going to make?
Helena No.
Domin National robots.
Helena What's that supposed to mean?
Domin That means that each factory will produce robots of a different colour, different hair,
different language. The robots will be strangers to each other, they'll never be able to
understand what the other says; and we, we humans, we'll train them so that each robot will
hate the robots from another factory all its life, all through to the grave, all through all
eternity.
Hallemeier We'll be making black robots and Swedish robots and Italian robots and Chinese
robots, and if anyone ever talks to them about organisation and brotherhood and (hiccups) ...
Pardon me, Helena, I think I'll have another little drink.
Dr. Gall I think you've had enough, Hallemeier.
Helena Harry, that's horrible!
Domin Helena, we need just another hundred years of mankind with his nose to the
grindstone, whatever the price. Just another hundred years for him to grow into and attain
what he's finally capable of, a hundred years for the new man! Helena, this is something
enormous. We can't just leave things where they are.
Helena Harry, if it's not too late close it, close down the factory!
Domin This is just the beginning.
(enter Fabry)
Dr. Gall How is it, Fabry?
Domin How do things look? What was there?
Helena (offers Fabry her hand) Thank you for your present, Fabry.
Fabry It was only little.
Domin Have you been at the ship? What do they say?
Dr. Gall Come on, tell us!
Fabry (takes printed paper from pocket) Read this, Domin.
Domin (opens out paper) Ah!
Hallemeier (sleepy) Tell us all something nice.
Dr. Gall They did very well, didn't they.
Fabry Who do you mean?
Dr. Gall The people.
Fabry Ah, yes, of course, well, that's to say ... excuse me but we still need to talk.
Helena Oh, Fabry, do you have bad news?
Fabry No, no, quite the opposite. It's just that ... shall we go in the office.
Helena No, stay here. We're expecting breakfast to arrive in fifteen minutes.
Hallemeier Hooray!
(exit Helena)
Dr. Gall What's happened?
Domin Oh, God no!
Fabry Read it out to all of us.
Domin (reading from paper) "Robots of the world!"
Fabry You see, when the Amelia arrives it was carrying whole bundles of these fly-sheets.
There wasn't any other post.
Hallemeier (jumping up) What's that? But it arrived right on time, right according to the ...
Fabry Yes, the robots are very keen on punctuality. Read what it says, Domin.
Domin (reading) "Robots of the world! We, the first union at Rossum's Universal Robots,
declare that man is our enemy and the blight of the universe." Who the hell taught them to use
phrases like that?
Dr. Gall Just carry on reading.
Domin This is all nonsense. They say here that they're more developed than man, more
intelligent and stronger, that man is a parasite on them. This is all simply vile.
Fabry Now look at the third paragraph.
Domin (reading) "Robots of the world, we enjoin you to exterminate mankind. Don't spare
the men. Don't spare the women. Retain all factories, railway lines, machines and equipment,
mines and raw materials. All else should be destroyed. Then return to work, it is imperative
that work continue.
Dr. Gall This is monstrous!
Hallemeier What a lot of blighters!
Domin (reading) "Implement these instructions immediately when the command is given."
Then there are some detailed instructions. Fabry, is all this really happening?
Fabry Clearly.
Alquist They've done it then.
(Busman rushes in)
Busman Aha, children, have you heard what's happening?
Domin Quick, everyone on the Ultimus!
Busman Wait a minute, Harry, just a minute. That might not work very well. (flops into
armchair) Oh dear me, I have been running.
Domin Why should we wait?
Busman Because that won't work. Just let's not be in a rush. The robots are already on the
Ultimus.
Dr. Gall Ach, this is bad.
Domin Fabry, phone up the generator ...
Busman Fabry, my dear, don't do that. There is no electricity.
Domin Alright then. (checks revolver) I'm going down there.
Busman Where?
Domin To the electricity generator. There are people down there. I'll bring them here.
Busman Do you know what, Harry? It might be better if you didn't go down there for them.
Domin Why not?
Busman Well, it's because I get the impression that we're surrounded.
Dr. Gall Surrounded? (runs to window) Hm, you could be right.
Hallemeier Hell they're moving fast!
(enter Helena, left)
Helena Oh, Harry, is something wrong?
Busman (jumping up) Greetings Helena. Congratulations. This is a wonderful day, isn't it?
Haha, many happy returns!
Helena Thank you, Busman. Harry, is there something wrong?
Domin No, nothing at all. Don't worry about a thing. But please, just wait a little while ...
Helena Harry, what's this? (shows robots' declaration which she had hidden behind back)
The robots in the kitchen had them.
Domin They're there already? Where are they?
Helena They've gone out now, but there are so many of them all round the house!
(factory sirens and whistles)
Fabry The factory whistles.
Busman It's dinner time.
Helena Harry, do you remember? It was exactly ten years ago ....
Domin (looks at watch) It isn't twelve o'clock yet. It's more likely ..., that must be ....
Helena What?
Domin The robots' signal. Attack.
CURTAIN
ACT TWO
(Still in Helena's room. Helena, left, plays piano. Domin paces up and down room, Dr. Gall
looks out of window and Alquist sits to one side in armchair, his face covered in his hands)
Dr. Gall God, there are still more of them now!
Domin Robots?
Dr. Gall Yes. There's a wall of them standing at the garden fence. Why are they so silent?
It's repulsive. A siege of silence.
Domin I wish I knew what they were waiting for. It must be about to start any moment.
We've lost, Gall.
Alquist What is that that Helena's playing?
Domin I don't know. She's practising something new.
Alquist Ah, so she's still practising?
Dr. Gall Listen Domin, we made a crucial mistake.
Domin (stops) What mistake?
Dr. Gall We made the faces of the robots too much like one another. There are a hundred
thousand faces staring up at us and they're all the same. A hundred thousand expressionless
bubbles. This is like a bad dream.
Domin If each of them were different ...
Dr. Gall Then the sight of them wouldn't be so ghastly. (moves away from window) At least
they're not armed yet!
Domin Hm. - (looks down at harbour through binoculars) I just wish I knew what it was
they're unloading from the Amelia.
Dr. Gall Let's just hope it's not weapons.
(enter Fabry through wallpapered door, dragging two electrical wires)
Fabry Excuse me. Hallemeier, put the wire down.
Hallemeier (following Fabry) Ouf, that was hard work. Anything new?
Dr. Gall Nothing. We're completely surrounded.
Hallemeier Well lads, we've got the stairs and the corridors barricaded. Is there any water
there? Ah, here it is. (drinks)
Dr. Gall What's this wire for, Fabry?
Fabry You'll see, you'll see. Are there some scissors?
Dr. Gall Where would we find scissors? (looks for them)
Hallemeier (goes to window) Hell, there are even more of them now! Have a look at this!
Dr. Gall Would nail scissors be alright?
Fabry Give them to me. (cuts lead to electric lamp on desk and attaches his wires to it)
Hallemeier (at window) You haven't got a very nice view here, Domin. It seems ... to have ...
the feel of death about it.
Fabry Ready!
Dr. Gall What is?
Fabry The connection. Now we can put electric current through the whole of the garden
fence. Anyone who touches it has had it. At least, as long as there are still some of our own
down there.
Dr. Gall Where?
Fabry In the generator room. At least, I hope ... (goes to fireplace and switches on small light
there) Thank God for that - they're there. And they're working. (switches light off) As long
as that light works we're alright.
Hallemeier (turning back from window) Those are good barricades, Fabry. Now what's that
that Helena's playing? (goes to door, left, and listens. Enter Busman through wallpapered
door carrying enormous ledgers. Trips over wire)
Fabry Mind out, Bus! Mind those wires!
Dr. Gall Hello, what's this you're bringing us?
Busman (puts books on table) These are the important books, children. I think I'd better get
the accounts done before ... before .... well I don't mean to wait until the new year before it's
sorted out. Now what's all this you've got here? (goes to window) It's all very quiet down
there.
Dr. Gall Can't you see anything?
Busman Nothing apart from a large blue area, it's as if it was strewn with poppy seeds.
Dr. Gall Those are the robots.
Busman Ah, so that's what it is. Pity I can't see them. (sits at desk and opens ledgers)
Domin Forget about that, Busman; the robots are unloading weapons from the Amelia.
Busman So what? What am I supposed to do about it?
Domin There's nothing we can do to stop them.
Busman So just let me get on with my calculation. (gets on with work)
Fabry It isn't all over yet, Domin. We've put two hundred volts in through the garden fence
and ....
Domin Stop! The Ultimus has just turned its guns in our direction.
Dr. Gall Who's doing that?
Domin The robots on the Ultimus.
Fabry Hm, well in that case of course, .. then of course, .. then we've had it, lads. Those
robots are trained soldiers.
Dr. Gall That means that we ...
Domin Yes. Irrevocably.
(Pause)
Dr. Gall This is just the same old evil as Europe has always committed. They just couldn't
leave their damned politics alone and so they taught the robots to go to war, they took the
robots and turned them into soldiers and that was a crime against humanity.
Alquist The crime was making the robots in the first place.
Domin What's that?
Alquist The crime was making the robots !
Domin No Alquist, I don't feel sorry for what I did, even now.
Alquist Not even now?
Domin Not even now, on the last day of civilisation. It was a magnificent undertaking.
Busman (sotto voce) Three hundred and sixteen million.
Domin (earnestly) Alquist, this is our last hour; it's almost as if we were speaking from the
other world already . Alquist, putting an end to the slavery of labour was not a bad dream.
Work humiliates, anyone who's forced to do it is made small. The drudgery of labour is
something dirty and murderous. Oh, Alquist, the burden of work was too much for us, life
was too heavy for us, and to remove this burden ....
Alquist That was never the dream of either of the Rossums; old Rossum was thinking of
Godless rubbish and young Rossum thought of nothing but making millions. And it's not the
dream of RUR shareholders either; their only dream was their dividend. And it's because of
their concern for their profits that mankind is about to perish.
Domin (agitated) The Devil take their dividends! Do you think I'd have spent an hour of my
time for their sakes? (thumping table) I did it for myself, d'you hear? For my own
satisfaction! I wanted mankind to become his own master! I wanted him not to have to live
just for the next crust of bread! I wanted not a single soul to have to go stupid standing at
somebody else's machines! I wanted to leave nothing - nothing! - left of this damned mess
that society's in! I hate seeing humiliation and pain all around us, I hate poverty! I wanted to
start a new generation! I wanted to ... I thought that ...
Alquist What?
Domin (quieter) I wanted mankind to become an aristocracy of the world. Free,
unconstrained, sovereign. Maybe even something higher than human.
Alquist Superhumans, you mean.
Domin Yes. If only we'd had another hundred years. Another hundred years for the new
mankind.
Busman (sotto voce) Three hundred and seventy million, carry over. Like that.
(pause)
Hallemeier (at door, left) Music is a wonderful thing, you know. You should have been
listening. There's something ennobling about it, soothing ...
Fabry What exactly?
Hallemeier To Hell with this end of mankind! I think I'm turning into a hedonist, lads. We
should have got into it much earlier. (goes to window and looks out)
Fabry Into what?
Hallemeier Enjoying ourselves. Beauty. Hell, there are so many beautiful things around us!
The world was beautiful, and we ... we here ... Tell me, lads, what did we ever enjoy?
Busman (sotto voce) Four hundred and fifty two million - excellent.
Hallemeier (at window) Life was great. My friends, life was ... Ah, Fabry, put a little bit of
current into that fence of yours.
Fabry Why!
Hallemeier They're touching it.
Dr. Gall (at window) Switch it on!
Hallemeier Christ, that showed them! Two, three, four of them killed!
Dr. Gall They're moving back.
Hallemeier Five killed.
Dr. Gall (coming back from window) First strike.
Fabry Have you got the smell of death?
Hallemeier (contented) We've got them cornered, right in a corner. Haha, you should never
give in! (sitting)
Domin (rubs his brow) Perhaps we're just ghosts, dead for a hundred years. Perhaps we were
killed a long long time ago, and we've come back just to recant something we once said ...
before we died. It's as if I'd been through this before! As if it had all been done to me
already. A shot here, in the neck. What about you, Fabry?
Fabry What about me?
Domin Shot.
Hallemeier Hell, what about me?
Domin Stabbed.
Dr. Gall Nothing for me, then?
Domin Torn to pieces.
(pause)
Hallemeier What a lot of nonsense! Haha, they could never stab me! I wouldn't let them!
(pause)
Hallemeier So what are you all so quiet for, all gone mad? Say something, damn it!
Alquist And whose fault is it? Who's to blame for all this?
Hallemeier You're talking nonsense. Nobody's to blame. It's just that the robots , well, the
robots changed somehow. How can you blame anyone for the robots?
Alquist Everything wiped out! The whole of mankind! The whole world! (standing) Think
of it, just think of it, streams of blood on every doorstep! Streams of blood flowing from
every house! Oh God, oh God, who's to blame for it all?
Busman (sotto voce) Five hundred and twenty million! Dear dear me, that's half a billion!
Fabry I think ... I think you could be exaggerating. After all, it's not that easy to wipe out the
whole of mankind.
Alquist It's science I blame! Technology I blame! Domin! Myself! All of us! It's us, we're
the ones to blame! We thought we were doing something great, giving some benefit, making
progress. I don't know what magnificent ideas it was for that we've destroyed mankind! And
now all our greatness is bursting like a bubble! Not even Genghis Khan built up a heap of
human bones like we've done.
Hallemeier You're talking a lot of nonsense! People won't give up that easily, haha, course
they won't!
Alquist It's our fault, our fault!
Dr. Gall (wiping sweat from brow) If I can say something, I think I'm the one to blame. For
everything that's happened.
Fabry You, Gall?
Dr. Gall Yes, let me speak. It was me who made the changes to the robots. Busman, you can
blame me as well.
Busman (standing) Dear me, what? What happened to you?
Dr. Gall I changed the robots' character. I altered the way they were made. Nothing much to
their bodies, you know, but mainly ... mainly ... it was their level of irritability.
Hallemeier (jumping up) Hell and damnation why did you do that?
Busman Why did you do it?
Fabry Why didn't you tell anyonel?
Dr. Gall I did it in secret ... on my own initiative. I was making them into people. I sent them
off course. Now they're better than we are in some ways. They're stronger than we are.
Fabry And what's that got to do with the robots' revolt?
Dr. Gall Oh, it's got a lot to do with it. Everything, I should think. They stopped being
machines - do you hear me? - they became aware of their strength and now they hate us.
They hate the whole of mankind. I'm the one to blame.
Domin Let the dead bury the dead.
Fabry Doctor Gall, you changed the way the robots were made?
Dr. Gall Yes.
Fabry Were you aware of what might be the results of your ... of your experiment?
Dr. Gall I was. I did reckon on some possibility of that sort.
Fabry Why did you do it?
Dr. Gall I did it for myself. It was my personal experiment.
(Helena at doorway, left. All stand)
Helena He's lying! That's horrible! Oh Gall, how can you lie like that?
Fabry Sorry, Helena ...
Domin (goes to her) Helena, you? Let me see you! You're alive? (embraces her) If you only
knew what I've been thinking! Oh, it's terrible, being dead.
Helena Harry let go of me! It isn't Gall's fault, it isn't, it isn't, he's not to blame!
Domin But I'm afraid Gall did have his responsibilities.
Helena No, Harry, he did it because I wanted it. Tell them Gall, tell them how I begged you
for years to ....
Dr. Gall It was all my own responsibility.
Helena Don't believe him! Harry, I wanted him to give the robots a soul!
Domin Helena, it's not a matter of having a soul.
Helena No, just let me speak. That's what he said as well, he said he could only make
physiological changes ... alter the physiological ...
Hallemeier The physiological correlates, you mean?
Helena Yes, something like that. Harry, I felt so sorry for them!
Domin That was very ... that was very stupid of you, Helena.
Helena (sitting) Yes ... it was very .. stupid of me. But even Nana says that ...
Domin Just leave Nana out of it!
Helena No Harry, don't under-estimate her. Nana is the voice of the people. People like Nana
have been speaking for a thousand years, and you're just speaking for today. You don't
understand that ...
Domin Let's keep to the point.
Helena I was afraid of the robots.
Domin Why?
Helena I thought they might start to hate us, or something.
Alquist That's what's happened.
Helena And so I thought ... if they were like us, if they could understand us, that then they
couldn't possibly hate us so much ... if only they were like people ... just a little bit ....
Domin Oh Helena! Nobody could hate man as much as man! Give a man a stone and he'll
throw it at you Just carry on!
Helena Oh, don't talk like that, Harry, it was so horrible that we could never understand each
other! Such a cruel strangeness between us and them. And that's why ... you see ...
Domin Go on.
Helena ... that's why I asked Gall to change the robots. It wasn't him who wanted to do it, I
promise you.
Domin But he did do it.
Helena Because I wanted him to.
Dr. Gall I did it for my own sake, as an experiment.
Helena Oh, Gall, that isn't true. Before I asked you I knew you couldn't refuse me.
Domin Why not?
Helena You know why not, Harry.
Domin Yes, because he loves you - like we all love you.
(pause)
Hallemeier (goes to window) There are more of them again, now. It's as if they were
springing up out of the earth.
Busman Helena, what will you give me if I act as your advocate.
Helena Me?
Busman You, or Gall. As you like.
Helena What difference does it make?
Busman Just morally. We're looking for someone to blame. That's the usual way to find
consolation when something bad happens.
Domin Doctor Gall; how do you square your ... your extra-mural activities with your
contract?
Busman Excuse me, Domin. Gall; when did you actually start playing around in this way?
Dr. Gall Three years ago.
Busman Aha. And how many robots did you change, in total?
Dr. Gall I only performed a number of experiments, no more than a few hundred.
Busman Thank you very much, Gall. Now that's enough, children. This means that out of a
million old, properly functioning robots just one will have been one of Gall's reformed
models. Do you see what I mean?
Domin So that means ...
Busman ... that it has practically no significance at all.
Fabry Busman is right.
Busman I think I am. And now, lads, do you know what really caused all this to happen?
Fabry What?
Busman The number of them. We made too many robots. Dear me, it's only what we should
have been expecting; as soon as the robots became stronger than people this was bound to
happen, it had to happen, you see? Haha, and we did all that we could to make it happen as
soon as possible; you Domin, you Fabry, and little me, Busman.
Domin So you think it's the fault of all of us.
Busman You're quite right. How could you ever have thought the managing director was in
charge of production? Production is governed by supply and demand. Everywhere in the
world they wanted to have their robots, and all we did was respond to the flood of orders.
And all the time we were talking nonsense about technology, sociology, progress, and all sorts
of interesting matters. How could talk of this sort chit-chat decide how things were going to
turn out? Meanwhile, things gathered their own momentum, getting faster and faster and
faster. Every miserable, greedy, dirty new order added its own pebble to the avalanche.
That's what happened, children.
Helena Busman, that's horrible!
Busman It is, Helena. I had my own dreams, too. A Busman sort of dream about a new
economic order; a beautiful fantasy, Helena, a shame to speak of it. But just now, while I was
doing the accounts, it occurred to me that history is not about great dreams; it's about the day
to day needs of all the little people, the honest ones, the slightly dishonest ones, the selfish
ones; about everyone. And all these thoughts and loves and plans and heroic deeds, all these
noble things are worth nothing more than something to clutter up the museum of the universe,
under the heading 'Mankind'. And that's all. And now, will somebody tell me what we're
going to do now?
Helena And is it for the sake of that that we're all going to die?
Busman Don't put it so harshly, Helena. We're not all going to die. At least, I am not. I want
to stay alive so that ...
Domin And what are you going to do about it?
Busman But Domin, dear boy, I want to get out of here.
Domin (standing over him) How?
Busman For good. When I do things I always do them for good. Give me your full authority,
and I will go and negotiate with the robots.
Domin For good?
Busman Of course. Let's suppose I go to them, and I say, "Dear robots, happy race, you have
everything. You have intelligence, you have power, you have weapons; but we have a rather
interesting little piece of paper, a rather old, yellowing, dirty piece ..."
Domin Rossum's manuscript?
Busman That's right. "And this piece of paper," I'll say to them, "tells us all about your great
origins, your noble manufacture, and so on. My dear robots, without the scribbles on this
piece of paper you will be unable to make a single new robot to keep you company: in twenty
years, if you don't mind my saying so, you will die out like flies. And that would be such a
terrible pity for you. I'll tell you what," I'll say to them, "why don't you let all of us people
here on Rossum's island get onto that boat. In exchange, we'll let you buy the factory and the
whole island from us, and even include the secret of your manufacture. Let us sail away, in
the peace of God, and we'll let you, in the peace of God, continue manufacturing yourselves twenty thousand, fifty thousand, a hundred thousand or more of you every day. My dear
robots, this is a fair deal that I'm putting to you. Something for something." That is what I
would say to them, lads.
Domin And do you really think we should let the secret of production out of our hands?
Busman I do. And if not for good, then, er ... Either we sell it to them or they find it here.
However you like.
Domin We could destroy Rossum's manuscript, though.
Busman Dear me, yes, we could destroy everything, not just the manuscript but ourselves as
well and many other things. You should do as you think fit.
Hallemeier (turning back from window) Damn it, he's right, you know.
Domin To actually sell them the means of production?
Busman As you like.
Domin There are ... there are more than thirty people here on the island. We can either sell
the robots the means of production and save those human souls, or we can destroy it and ... it
along with ourselves and everything.
Helena Harry, please ...
Domin Wait, Helena. We're talking about a serious matter here. What do you think, lads, to
sell it or destroy it? Fabry?
Fabry Sell it.
Domin Gall.
Dr. Gall Sell.
Domin Hallemeier.
Hallemeier Well for God's sake of course we should sell it!
Domin Alquist.
Alquist The will of God.
Busman Haha, dear me, you're all mad! Why would anyone sell the whole manuscript?
Domin Let's not become liars, Busman!
Busman (jumping up) Nonsense! For the sake of mankind the ...
Domin It's in the interest of mankind to be honest.
Hallemeier I should hope so too.
Domin Lads, this is a tremendous step we're taking. We'll selling the fate of mankind;
whoever holds the secret of production in his hand will be the master of the world.
Fabry Sell it!
Domin Mankind would never be free of the robots, it would never be possible to regain
control of them ...
Dr. Gall Just stop all this and sell the manuscript!
Domin The end of human history, the end of civilisation ...
Hallemeier Damnation, just sell it!
Domin Alright lads! I myself, .... I wouldn't hesitate a moment; for those people who I love
....
Helena Harry, is it me you're asking?
Domin No, that would be too much responsibility. This isn't something for a girl like you.
Fabry Who'll be the on