Friday Fictioneers: Magic

And if you can, please help out Merbear. Just click The “Save A…” link on the left..

Every week, Rochelle Wisoff Fields posts a photo, and challenges her readers to write 100 words (ish) inspired by the picture. This week’s picture is from D. Lovering at 40 Again, and it’s followed by a story exactly 100 words long, with a beginning, a middle and an end.
(I figured since it’s my first time, I should follow the rules.)
Click over to her site to read some other great entries, and maybe leave your own!

They entered the canopy and the air smelled cleaner, the laughter of children around the square louder and more vibrant.
The man in the suit turned to their guide.
“Odd decoration for the entrance to a missile defense, isn’t it?”
The guide smiled. “No entrance. This is it.” He whipped out a handgun, pointing it at the man, who barely had time to cringe before the trigger was pulled.
The bullet dribbled from the barrel, bouncing harmlessly off the pavement.
“H-how…?” sputtered the man in the suit.
“The magic of the Maypole”, answered the guide. “Don’t you believe in magic?

All criticism is welcome. Hell, since you’re reading, it’s in your interest to help me write better. 😉

My office is on 8th at 39th. I may do the mad dash to buy 1/2 price tix again after work tonight. (Saw Of Mice and Men last night = phenomenal!!) And I still have remnants of the Ebola. But, if you’re up to a coffee we could try to coordinate a day/time. I’m leaving for the airport at 9:30 am tomorrow but could do an early morning coffee. Assuming you aren’t afraid of early mornings. Or ebola.

Next trip might make more logistical sense since you’ve got the concert and I (hopefully) have a show. Unless you’re thinking in the a.m. around 8:30? Just thinking I’ll need to be back at hotel for a 9:30 pickup at 8th/45th.

Guapo, you did it! Yay! You make this look easy. You’re a pro at this. Intricate, unique take. I was not sure how you would get magic out of a defense missile, but you did it with flying maypole colors. This is great!

Guap, I would not have thought along those lines for a story to go with this picture, but that’s why you’re a creative, prolific writer and I’m just, ahh… doing what I do over here. Seriously, you’re GOOD!

I’ll have to go check the other submissions and see what more creative people have come up with.

Actually, the lists are written in a more biblical –
“And yea, thou shalt place the canned goods inside the cart, but woe unto thee that does crusheth the eggs with them, for the consumer shalt be mightily displeased, and demonstrate his wrath upon thine potato chips, crushing them innest to smaller and smaller chips until BEHOLD! There is only dust.
Thus turneth down the aisle.”

Had to read it twice– this feels like something I would dream, where I’d be trying to shoot someone and it would just fall to the ground a la The Matrix.
Not that I dream about shooting people.
Okay, only bad people.

I know what you mean. I’m easily my own worst editor.
I’d rather just tell the story until it’s done, then walk away.
The challenges are good for making you think about exactly what words and ideas you’re using.

I don’t know how you got so much story into only 100 words. I definitely want more details, but I guess that would defeat the purpose, huh? I really enjoy the abrupt change from realistic to fantastical and totally unexpected!

Bravo! Welcome to FF! It’s fun to see you jump in and come up with such a creative story. You’ll see, this is very addictive. No surprise… you have more comments than anyone else! What a way to make an entrance. 😉

I’m awestruck… I love how you set the scene with the air smelling cleaner and the vibrant laughter of the children. To be able to transport someone in one sentence… I can’t even. I’m still in denial that I’m a long-form blogger. I refuse to tag my posts long form, I don’t want to write long posts. If I could write a short, engaging story like this in 100 words, well I would just shut my laptop and decide that I was done. Writing: accomplished.

Thanks. I’m in the US, and I’ll leave myself a note about the comma placement.

I had several more words to set that tone with the cleaner air that I had to pare down to get to 100. I’m glad the intention carried in what was left – i thought it did, but I’m a terrible interpreter of what I’ve written.

Well played Sir Gaupo!
I’m having so much fun tonight getting caught up on everyone’s great work. Masterful story in a very short space!
For the Amtrak residency, I had to answer two questions in 100 characters including spaces–they were both 108 words. One of the most challenging things I’ve ever done!!
At least I’ve got access to learn from the best. Loved it!
(Did you see Christy and Mary’s 50 word stories from the weekend?)