Hey, do you like schadenfreude and tears? Well, have I got news for you! Lindsay Lohan’s reality show, Lindsay, is premiering on OWN this Sunday, and it looks like it’s going to be every bit the gigantic sh*tshow everybody justifiably assumed it was going to be. If you’ll recall, Lord Oprah was the first to sink her talons into Lohan after her release from rehab last summer, promising her an “eight-part documentary series” to help her get her life back on track. Because that’s exactly what a troubled recovering addict needs: Cameras following them around, constantly.

Already, the extended trailer has Lindsay fighting with her dad, tears, fighting with her producers, more tears, getting locked out of her apartment, refusing to let cameras into her apartment, questionable sobriety, overall flakiness, cancelling photo shoots… You know, basically your normal experience of dealing with Lindsay Lohan in any capacity.

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“This is exactly what everybody said was gonna happen, and I believed differently,” says Oprah en route to an intervention with her subject matter. Except, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU KNEW WAS GOING TO HAPPEN OPRAH. Cut the disingenuous crap, we all know damn well ratings gold isn’t paved with sobriety and success.

The lady reporting to Oprah on how Lohan’s doing and just flipping through pages like it’s a rap sheet on law and order, good.
Her “Sober Coach” when asked about her sobriety just responds errrmmmm… great.
Lindsay sitting in front of Oprah with that look of fear because she knows she’s going to be confronted with undeniable truth about herself, perfect.