4. They Worry If You Don't Text Them Back

Text messages are a funny thing, aren't they? They take up zero space in the physical world — they weigh nothing, they don't smell, and you can ingest an infinite amount without gaining weight — but as meaningless as they sometimes seem, they secretly are full of meaning. Not all of them, of course — "Brunch at 10 on Wednesday?" doesn't have the same power as "Baby, what's wrong? Why won't you pick up?" But a non-response to the former is a mere trifle compared to a non response to the latter. Admit it: When you choose not to answer your girlfriend's texts — right away, or at all — you're sending a message that they aren't important (and thus she isn't, either.) So be a gentleman, a hero, a knight in shining armor: If she texts you, just text back. (Unless you're driving.)