1. Preheat oven to 350 F. Grease or line your cupcake pans. Spread coconut on a baking sheet and toast until golden (watch carefully that it does not burn). Set aside to cool.2. In a large bowl, beat butter and sugar for about 5 minutes, until light and fluffy. Stir together flour, baking powder and salt. Set aside. Combine egg whites, milk and vanilla and coconut extracts. Add 1/3 of the flour mixture to the butter mixture then add half the milk mixture. Continue to alternate beginning and ending with flour mixture, until mixture is well combined. Set aside 1/4 of the coconut for topping. Working over the bowl, rub the remaining coconut between your palms so it is finely crumbled, stir the crumbled toasted coconut into the batter.3. Fill cupcake pans 3/4 full. Bake cupcakes 20-25 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean. Set aside to cool.4. Stir together dulce de leche and cream cheese until smooth. Spread on cupcakes, top with remaining toasted coconut.