Tuesday’s Bulletin Board included a note from Hudson Sam: “Until I moved to Wisconsin, I never realized the reverence in which Vince Lombardi is held. So every time I get in a bar or group of Wisconsinites, I have been in the habit of announcing: ‘I bet I’m the only living guy in this state that actually saw Vince Lombardi PLAY football in college.’ Never got a taker.

“Recently I realized that was 71 years ago. No wonder I get lots of interest but no takers!”

We soon heard from Swedge of Rochester: “I think Hudson Sam is on to something here. A flock of birds, a pride of lions, a bar of Wisconsinites. Makes sense to me.”

Ah, the smell of it!

Revenge Division

Grandpa Wiggs of the Cabbage Patch: “This time of year always reminds me of one of the tales my buddy Tim has told me.

“He was raised on a farm in Colorado – and since this was many years ago, they used an outhouse. Well, it seemed like a good prank to the city boys to go out in the country and knock over outhouses on Halloween.

“This had happened too many times, and Tim’s father had tired of it, so on that Halloween evening, before the family retired for the night, he went out and moved the outhouse about four feet forward, leaving the gaping pit in shadow.

“I don’t know how much time passed, but eventually Tim’s dad heard a lot of yelling coming from that direction. He soon found two teenagers trapped in the ‘pit.’ It seemed one had fallen in, and the other had tried to pull him out but had slipped and joined him.

“I know not what words were exchanged, but Tim said his dad did give the boys a rope so they could climb out – but refused to let them use his hose to wash themselves off, so they had to drive home in the smelly condition they had gotten themselves into.

“His outhouse was never tipped over again.

“I imagine he slept very well that Halloween night, so many years ago.”

Our theater of seasons

The Old Woodchopper of Eagan: “I blew the leaves out of the gutters and raked the lawn yesterday. Couldn’t tell the difference today.

“Last night’s campfire flares up again as I toss small twigs into it while I rake again.

“The flowers and plants that have been outside all summer have now begun to be rotated into the living room by the Bride of 38 Years. As I watch the ballgame, I am reminded of the Como Conservatory or the Flower Garden at the Bellagio casino in Las Vegas.

“With the leaves gone, the sun now peeks into the living room during the day. The moon, the same during the night.

“The walking path between the house and the woods is covered by leaves again. And again.

“The leaves on the kitchen floor need to be swept up again.

“The seasons, they are a-changing.

“My apologies to Bob Dylan.”

Life as we know it

Al B of Hartland: “I enjoy going into the woods and discovering something new, as I do on each visit, and then leaving it alone. It is a source of endless fascination for me.

“It’s nice to be able to go to a place and view something that hasn’t been changed much by man. It’s the perfect place to rest the mind. Man gives himself too much importance. We want the world to be the way we want it to be. We want to say which creatures are good and which ones are bad; which ones shall live and which ones shall die. We strive to improve on things that need no improving.

“We have been given a thrifty world – no living thing goes to waste. Everything is here for a purpose.”

The simple pleasures

Old-Fashioned Names Division

Dee: “My husband had the most wonderful aunt and uncle. They were the sweetest people in the world. Their names were Bertha and Al – Albert. They had one daughter, and her name was ‘Albertha’ – though they did drop the one letter in the name. I thought that was pretty clever of them, considering they did this 75 years ago. I hope my husband’s cousin doesn’t mind giving away her age.

“They were just the loveliest people in the world. Aunt Bertha had a memory that was unbelievable. She could remember people’s wedding dates, to the year – when she hadn’t even been at the wedding. It was a miracle!”

Sergeant Bilko of St. Paul: “I was just reading Mabelle‘s comment about ‘Albert’ as a woman’s name. My cousin Alberta was named after her father, Albert – and when she became of age, she legally changed her name to ‘Gretchen.’

“Can’t blame her.”

What’s in a name?

The D in Scandia: “My dad’s sisters were named Edna, Eva, Emma, Ida and Viola.

“On my mom’s side, we had an Elsie, a Bertha, and another Ida.

“Fortunately neither I nor my sisters were named any of these.”

The Egarian Exhorter: “I remember my father telling us, many times, about three brothers who all lived just a few miles from each other (and us) in rural northeast Nebraska. The three brothers were named Arsenius, Alzerius, and Longenius – who was called ‘Long’ for short.”

“I had on a pair of white cotton anklets – almost exactly alike, except that one sock had a half-inch ribbing around the top, and the other was plain. As I was wearing slacks, I don’t know how she even saw them.

“So, now let me tell you who was critiquing my attire. It was my 13-year-old granddaughter, who was wearing blue jeans – much too long, so they were dragging in the mud, and frayed. She was also wearing a sweatshirt with the cuff ribbing torn and hanging half off.

“I guess I should be more careful about choosing my clothes.”

Band Name of the Day

Long for Short

Web Site of the Day

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