Posts Tagged ‘birth choices’

Birth without trauma. Birth in which the mother and baby are healthy and happy. Birth which leaves no lasting ramifications, either physical or emotional. A Perfect Birth. That’s what I have now experienced with the birth of my son.

Going into birth this time, I was ready. Ready, educated, and excited. My pregnancy before this delivery was rocky, to say the least. Symphysis Pubic Dysfunction, two hospital stays due to illness, and a last-minute run around regarding getting the delivery I wanted (and needed) posed real issues for me. However, the delivery, a delivery that myself and my doctor agreed to be most beneficial to mother and baby, was such that it set up “a perfect birth.”

My son’s birth story:

I went into the hospital at 11:30, with the understanding that the c-section would take place at 1:00. I was 38 weeks, 2 days and with no indications of imminent labor, I understood that my surgery could be “pushed” for emergency patients. I was made comfortable while waiting for my turn, and an IV was inserted, and any questions I had were answered. A little after 1:00, I was wheeled into the delivery room. I walked myself to the bed and was told how to sit for an effective spinal. All the while, the medical professionals present were kind, understanding, supportive, and reassuring. My spinal was placed without incident and then I was instructed to lie down. Once numbed, I was happy to see my husband arrive by my head. And then, the incision, the surgery, and less than 8 minutes from first incision, my baby boy’s screams as he was born. Perfect baby boy, who was immediately shown to me and then checked out by the nurses (with my husband by his side and in the same room). Once wrapped up, my husband held him by my head as they stitched me up. All the while I felt cared for, informed, and respected. A complete opposite to my previous birth experience. My husband, baby, and I ventured to recovery together where I was able to effectively breastfeed and bond with the newest member of our family. Later that evening, my daughter joined us and our family of four was “officially” all together.

Since the birth, I have managed my pain and was off all pain killers within the first week. I am able to walk now with the symphysis pubic dysfunction drastically diminished. I have nothing but positive memories of the birth and my daily interactions reflect positivity. I am looking forward to noting my progress at my 6 week check-up. The baby is doing wonderfully as well. Over eight pounds at birth, he continues to thrive, both feeding and sleeping as well as a 3 and 1/2 week old should.

The support I have had for this birth experience was immeasurable. Thank you all.

Lately, I have seen a lot written about “natural birthers” versus “hospital birthers.” Women versus Women in a battle for who has a better birth plan, who has a better idea about how we should birth, who has a “safer” way to birth, who has an ideal way to birth.

Ladies, and it is mostly ladies-why are we fighting each other? We are all looking for the same thing- the birth that is right for us. As I have stated previously in my post on birth position, my birth position is that women should have the choice, prenatally, and during birth, to have their babies the way that they want to have their babies while preserving the mother’s health and the child’s health through a balance of the mother’s informed wishes and competent medical professional opinion.

This US versus THEM phenomenon does not need to occur. In fact, it is detrimental to women’s progress when we keep chipping away at each others’ choices and freedoms. There is no need to impose your belief system on others as the only true way. I hope that when people read my blog they realize that this is my opinion, my quest to educate women, their families, and the community about the very real physical and emotional ramifications of birth trauma.

As I have written before, I recognize that birth trauma can arise from hospital births, home births, non-medicated births, medicated births,medically assisted births, and anything else that causes the mother to feel helpless and full of fear. (remember, it’s in the eye of the beholder.) It is not up to me to tell another which birth would be less traumatizing, it’s only up to me to share MY story and help other mothers with birth trauma explore the options right for them.

It is when we reach a quagmire between two opposing groups that real progress stops. Yes, natural birthers make valid points. Yes, hospital birthers make valid points. And, YES, people can educate themselves and make their own decision regarding their birth choices. Let’s stop focusing on the birth and shed light on the issues that can result from any birth. Issues like birth trauma, physical and emotional.