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Oct 7, 2012

Writing, writing, writing....

Haven't posted one of these in a while.. probably because I haven't had the time to write a whole heck of a lot.. Unfortunate, but I've got two whole days to myself, so here we go :)

My book, which is totally in its infancy (practically a fetus), is a completely unorganized, chaotic mess. I'm trying, hard as I might, to form an outline, but my mind is just all over the place. One idea turns into fifty and I can't keep track of my own thought process. LOL. To all those aspiring writers, or even published authors

~ How do you organize your thoughts? ~

Here's a little teaser of what I'm working on...

I go through the motions, knowing full and well that every smile, every fake laugh is just a way to fit in, to stay under the radar. Don't want any attention drawn to the fact that I honestly don't give a rat's ass. Because that's inhuman, and being inhuman is… wrong.

I laugh at something the girl sitting next to me says. Not sure exactly what the conversation is about, but with people, all you have to do is smile and nod, and they think they have your full attention. Little does she know that I've got better things to think about than how she and her husband met, got married, hopefully I'll be as lucky as her one day... blah, blah, blah. Who would of thought the world didn't revolve around her?

Well aware that I'm moping, I excuse myself from the table and make my best effort not to drag my high-heeled feet towards the nearest restroom. I need a moment to fix my smile and maybe reapply my cherry-flavored lip gloss to the approval of the masses. I finally make it through the herd of cattle, close the bathroom door, and lock it behind me. Thank. God.

How do people live like this? Don't they know there's a whole hidden world out there full of danger? Death? Blood? No. Of course not. Why would they? All they have to do is sip their bubbly champagne in denial that anything exists beyond their bloated bank accounts, their biggest worry being a crooked tie or a run in their pantyhose. Ignorant sheep.

I once thought this was my world, but it all seems so small and insignificant now. How will I keep myself from drowning in this lie? This illusion?