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Monday, June 4, 2012

Day 50- 'I Don't want to Change'

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to live the thought out of 'i don't want to change' due to accepting my desire that its too much and I can't do it direct me to not walk the change because I believe that I am not capable enough.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to accept and allow the thought that I cant change because I am not capable enough realizing and seeing this is due to the point of not wanting to face myself and standing up and pushing through all resistances I face as I see and realize all it take within me is a decision and live it out breath by breath.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to not desire to face myself and walk through the resistances as I want to relax and not have to walk the walk that it will take to in fact walk the change that is required to be walked within and as this process of equalizing self as the mind to the physical as it will be a long walk.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow desires as resistances to 'have a nice time' and its so long direct me into self sabotage where I will compromise my process for a feeling and an experience to feel good when what I realize and understand within who I am here is that I must change to equalize self with the physical to stop the separation of myself in this world and the enslavement of ourselves within as as this physical existence to the mind consciousness system, which is not a feeling nor an experience to strive for or gett a feeling from, but a living, here, in breath as I walk, no experience a being.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to indulge in the point of overwhelmingness direct me into self sabotage where i resist change because its a long process when I realize this process is walked step by step and thus in time will accumulate to what it will be as time, but what I work with is here in breath moment by moment and thus it is manageable and actually simple in terms of the walking of it, it require to slow down which is cool anyway to walk as breath.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to desire to always chase experiences as good feelings instead of facing who I am and walking what needs to be walked to change what is here as this world as I realize the only way to get this done is if I in fact change myself for real through actually doing it and living the correction as myself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to abdicate myself to the mind as nice feelings as experiences instead of facing what I have created, taking responsibility, and changing to walk the correction to create a better world for all which will be better for me too.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to indulge in self interest for my own happiness and comfort while many others suffer due to the lack that this greed balances out as and thus create suffering in this world due to my desire for more.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to not change because I want to get my happiness through energy as feelings which is easy.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to desire the easy way out, the quick fix, but realizing that the quick fix is just that quick and doesn't consider all that is here thus will always fail.

When and as this point to want to indulge in the thought to not want to change, and get a quick fix by getting easy energy through experiences as the mind, I stop, breath, and re-align with my physical as I realize I am life and life is worth it to walk in breath in patiences and get this done for real once and for all. So I breath to stabilize myself and say 'I am one and equal with life' and push through all resistance.

I commit to re-align with breath and stop indulging in the mind as thoughts, feelings, experiences.

I commit to walk the change that is necessary and walk my process to self correction.

I commit to walk one and equal with all those who are willing to create a world that is best for all and do my part to stand equal within this change and live the solution in equality and oneness to all in this world.

I commit to walk through all resistances in practical living and walk what is needed to be walked to correct myself and stand as life one and equal as the solution to end suffering forevermore on this planet.

i dont want to change, i dont care, life is too hard, why is life hard, hardships, stress, no trust, solutions, equality, equal life, eqafe, desteni, journey to life, 2012,