Traitor

I’m confused too, John.

How could you do this to us? How could you treat us in Natstown like this? Don’t you know the pain this causes us? And around Christmas, the timing could not be worse.

John Lannan has signed with the Philadelphia Phillies. He has joined our most hated rival, all for $2.5 to $5 million. Was it worth it? Was it worth becoming the most hated man in Washington aside from every member in American politics?

The most powerful feeling for me right now is confusion. What did we ever do to you to make you sign with Philly? Sending you down to Syracuse wasn’t meant to upset you. It was giving you a chance to see how beautiful upstate NY could be. And finding 5 better starters than you wasn’t meant to put you out of a job. It was just to give you some more rest. Everyone loves vacation days at work!

Well LeBron, enjoy your time in Philadelphia. I’m sure all the Lannan jerseys in DC have been burnt, and all the posters taken down and also burnt. All 17 of them!