When do you remove your profile from Internet dating sites

As Internet dating becomes more popular, I hear (semi-)singles debate when to take down their profile — or at least “hide” or “disable” it.

This is a good question.

While there are no firm rules, the world of Internet dating is different than traditional courting. It almost encourages (AKA forces) a “where are we”-type conversation.

I’d saying if you just started going out– say a few weeks, or even a month — keep the profile posted. Even if you exchanged flirty e-mails and virtual winks or roses, the real dating didn’t begin till your first face-to-face.

A few lunch meetings, dinner dates and even an overnight or two, does not make you boyfriend and girlfriend. In fact, if your get togethers are infrequent, and unpredictable, there is a good chance the man or woman you met online is also still sowing his or her oats.

If, on the otherhand, you’ve been hot and heavy for a solid six months, and her profile clearly says she’s seeking “serious” or “long-term” relationships, and her account is still active (complete with new photos and an updated “about me” section), you’re as good as gone.

2 Responses

Maybe this could be an appropriate thing for a “ten-date rule.” Three is a bit too soon, and four is not really an indication either. By the tenth date you probably already had at least one conversation about what your intentions are and “where this is going.” Not necessarily to make major plans, but just to decide if there is something there. If there really is something there and you are going exclusive, at least for a probationary period, then hide your profile. It doesn’t cost any money and just takes one click. If and when the status changes, you can always change it back. It takes two seconds.

I agree with Mike – that was a well thought out answer and very appropriate. I also don’t find it inappropriate to “hide” or “block” your profile from the people you have met, regardless of what your status is. Though that could be a bit wierd of an explanation as to why you blocked them if they decide to “monitor” you, should they really be monitoring you’re activity if you’re not yet exclusive? There is nothing worse than when people continue to “wink” you every day after you’ve already talked on the phone and even have met, and when people check to see if and how often you are on the site. Those wierd situations add some drama and creepiness to what could’ve been a pleasant social encounter, but got ruined because someone is overenthusiastic (optimistic view) or absolutely psycho (worst case scenario).