Failed miserably on the work/life balance. I’m in love with my work laptop as it makes things much easier but the downside is I can now work from home. Things were mad last week and I ended up sitting doing a pile of work Saturday night – not good. I’ve found a new nursery so just have to get Samuel signed up there ready to change in November and I think everything is sorted there.

I lost 1lb. I don’t feel very worthy of that pound and was surprised but I will take it thank you very much. Will just be a bit wary of next weeks weight but happy to have lost 5lbs in 3 weeks.

Also on a random note – join a book club is on my DayZero list. I’ve been looking for a while with no success. Out of the blue I was followed on twitter this week by Northampton Literature Group. Not sure why, I do not display any literaery skills! Anyway, I had a look at their website and they have a reading circle. Had a look and they meet very close to where I live. I’ve made contact and will be going to the next meeting 🙂

2. What did you do this week to make yourself feel fabulous?

Nothing. Still struggling this week. Decided on an impromptu trip to Mum and Dads caravan for bank holiday weekend so looking forward to that.

3. What has been your biggest challenge this week?

Our washing machine died on Thursday. I’m just really fed up and feel we’ve had 4 weeks of continual rubbish and upheaval – nursery, illness, Steven’s bike and the garage. I came home from work and Steven told me about the washing machine. After my pathetic attempts to fix it it was clear that best case scenario was paying someone to fix it, worst was a new machine. I wasn’t happy. I went upstairs, locked myself in the bathroom, cried, got it out of my system and then came downstairs like nothing had happened. It can’t be fixed for a reasonable amount of money and we were advised to just get a new one.

I spent the weekend taking my washing to my sister in laws and neighbours so we have clothes to wear. The new one arrives on Wednesday so we’re just getting on with it now 🙂

4. Do you need neatness and order to feel good or does a bit of untidiness not bother you?

I like order but I am very untidy. A room can look like a total tip but I generally know where everything is. I can’t handle too neat – it feels a bit clinical and OCD for my liking. I need some kind of system but its fine if that system is organised chaos.

5. Would you rather be attacked by 20 duck sized horses or 20 horse sized ducks?

I am still totally puzzled by this random and bizarre question. I’ll go with the duck sized horses – I’ll be bigger than them and hopefully can run faster than them.

Positive picture

A random one. My car started making a horrible noise on the way to work this morning. Eventually I found a piece of wood with a nail through it stuck in the front wheel. It was on the edge so I thought I was now going to have to get a new tyre. I managed to get to work. The little garage by my office didn’t do tyres so he recommended someone round the corner (didn’t know this place existed). He looked at it, said straight away that he could repair it and I could leave the car there and he would fix it all whilst I was at work. I left very happy, feeling much more positive with a bill far better than a new tyre.

(Please note, this isn’t my actual wheel – mine are filthy. It does look like that though for accuracy)

I’m going to try hard to be positive and not descend into moaning! Another week I’m pleased is over – been very busy and feel like I could sleep for several days if given the chance. Samuel is still waking stupidly early and Steven has been very unhelpful in letting me have a lie in one morning. Work is still manic and showing no sign of letting up so I’ve got the feeling of being on a treadmill at the moment.

I went to a meeting about the Safe and Sustainable programme on Tuesday night. The department of health is currently reviewing all children’s cardiac surgery and under the current proposals it looks like Oxford could lose surgery. This would means we could have to travel to Southampton or London for Samuel’s treatment in the future. I went to the meeting open-minded and supportive of the theory behind the suggestions made. Sadly I was left doubting the whole thing and very skeptical about the idea. It seems the suggestions made have no foundation and at no time did the panel back up their arguments. I’m worried the decisions have already been made and the meetings are just an exercise in ticking the right boxes so it looks like correct process has been followed. We will be very very sad if Oxford closes and it is already clear that the people working there are looking for jobs elsewhere. I’m feeling the need to put this energy into a good moaning letter to my MP!

But let’s be positive!

I’ve just bought lots of wool on eBay to make myself a couple of things (please, no-one tell Steven as he may ask how much money I’ve spent)

I’ve got a few days off work next month to escape to Mum and Dad’s caravan with Eloise and Samuel. Steven can’t get the time off work so I’m biting the bullet and going on my own. I’m a little scared of the thought of no adult conversation for nearly three days (hence the large quantity of wool to help me knit my way back to sanity)

I’m really enjoying my book at the moment – The Kite Runner. Despite my tiredness and falling asleep mid-chapter I’ve got a big pile of books to work through.

Time for an update. After a flurry of posts last week I lost momentum and haven’t got round to posting but here we are.

Been very busy – work still going well and life is generally positive. Samuel has been ill with conjunctivitis and got sent home from nursery. Another trip to the doctors. I’m finding it a little frustrating that he’s picking little things up and already I’ve missed two days at work through him being ill.

I had Monday off work to get my folksy stuff online. I didn’t get as much done as I’d hoped but its a start. I’m furiously knitting a bag to get that online and I have some ideas for some new bits to work on next. I’m learning to take things at a pace and it doesn’t matter if it takes me a little while to get where I want to go.

I’ve been mulling over going back to university to carry on with my masters. I’ve currently suspended my studies after Samuel was ill but I still have to hand in an assignment that I failed last September. I’ve been struggling with whether to redo it or just forget it and walk away. My head is saying do it but my heart is saying I can’t be bothered. We talked about it in my life coaching session today and I think I’m going to do the essay. I’ve booked some time to go to the library and sort all of the old work out and have a think about things. I’ll see how it goes. Deep down I don’t want to return to doing the rest of my masters but I know I have to to help my chances of promotion. The list has come round for the next group of modules and there is nothing on there that interests me. I’ve decided to look for an alternative course that I could transfer onto and I’ve found one that is 100% online and would be funded by work. I’ve also decided to just aim to get a postgrad certificate first rather than aiming for the full masters. If I do the certificate and I’m happy then I can continue. I’m not putting pressure on myself – I’m trying hard to keep my new ethos of small achievable goals.

Tomorrow we’re off to Nannycaraban for a family weekend. On Saturday I’m doing a sponsored walk to raise money for the Children’ Heart Federation so we’re hoping for good weather (I’m not convinced). It’s also my 30th birthday on Monday so I’m intending to eat lots of cake and drink lots of red wine.