The Last First

As a singer/songwriter/blogger I spend my days looking for creativity under every nook and cranny. I find that with any dramatic experience, comes the possibility for more material. So when life throws me a curve ball, I welcome it with the hopes that I can at least get a solid song or blog out of it.

However, the challenge then becomes finding good material when life is easy breezy! What’s a girl to write about when there’s no drama to inspire her?

I recently met my good friend Kyle for lunch to help him brainstorm some lavish ideas for his girlfriend’s fast approaching birthday. While he was naming off various idea’s like sky diving or a trip to Vegas, the only opinion he got from me was a big ol’, “Hell No! Don’t ever get ME a gift like that. I’m not adventurous and I don’t care!”. He then asked one of the most profound questions I have heard in a very long time; “Jackie, when was the last time you did something for the first time?”

Boy did that stop me in my tracks. I quickly tried to rack my brain for something interesting…I mean, I’ve done cool stuff in my life, haven’t I? Sure, I’m deathly afraid of heights so that puts the kibosh on a lot, but beyond that there’s got to be something…

Shamefully, after three whole days of marinating and moping, I finally came up with something. Excited to brag, I quickly called Kyle to tell him the news. “I GOT IT! The last time I did something for the first time was back in March (5 months earlier). I played guitar and sang without Brandon (my husband/guitarist) by my side to an entire room full of people at a house party that my aunt was throwing!” He nonchalantly asked me how it felt. “Well…it was terrifying, but a very proud personal moment and I was so happy that I did it.” I said. Expecting him to share at least some of the excitement and enthusiasm I had, I was quite disappointed when all I got back was, “Good, do it more often!”

That conversation has been haunting me ever since. While I came up with something eventually, I hated how hard it was to answer such a silly question. I’m an artist! It’s my job to be adventurously exploring the deep, dark corners of all aspects of life and humanity!

Well…in reality like most people, I have a big goal, and every day I wake up and choose to either work towards it, or on less inspiring days, blow it off for the time being. But is it possible that my struggle for daily creativity without drama is linked to my lack of new experiences?

With this question in mind, I’ve decided to give myself a little homework. I am now required to do something new at least once a month! It doesn’t matter how big or small. It just needs to be new!

So I’m looking for ideas! My only hard pass will be anything that has to do with facing my fear of heights. FOR NOW! …One emotional issue at a time people, please!

Along with your ideas, I’d love to hear about some new things that you’ve done recently. What was it and how did it feel to do it for the first time? Or maybe you’re in the same boat as I am, and we can face this challenge together!

It’s an amazing and beautiful world out there y’all. SOLET’S START LIVING LIFE TO THE FULLEST!!!

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