Alexander in the open part 9 – Alexander pushes his limits

It’s Wednesday morning, the day of my event and we are all in the kitchen sorting breakfasts and lunches.

“I’m looking forward to mini golf later.” Jay says to Peter.

“Me too it’ll be fun.” Peter says.

“You’ll be finished in time for Alexanders talk won’t you? Will you meet us there?” Brian asks.

Peter gives a look of panic and disbelief.

“Shit I forgot. Of course we’ll be at the talk. I’m really excited.” Peter says.

“But Adam paid for our spot already.” Jay says.

“It’s fine if you don’t want to come. You won’t hear anything you don’t know.” I say.

Brian hugs me from behind.

“Stop being so nice, let them have it.” Brian whispers in my ear.

I shrug and head out.

Later I meet Peter for lunch.

“Are you mad at me?” Peter asks.

“Yeah. For making plans without me again.” I say.

“It’s just 3 way dates are difficult when we are doubling with others.” Peter says.

“I guess so. What did you decide to do?” I ask.

“Are you kidding? We’re coming to your event. I can’t believe you have to ask.” Peter says.

“Thanks, I’m really glad you’re coming. It’s a good job, the tickets are in your name.” I say.

“Let’s do something just us on Friday.” Peter says.

“No.” I say.

“What do you mean no?” Peter asks.

“I can’t be a hypocrite. I hate when you make plans without me, without even letting me know.” I say.

“You’re really struggling with this? We used to make separate plans all the time.” Peter says.

“I guess so. I’m just so fucking jealous. I didn’t expect to be.” I say.

“Well you make me feel wanted.” Peter says and we kiss quickly.

That evening I’m excited, a bit nervous about how I’ll be received and a lot confused about why people are coming. Still it’s raised some good money for the college clubs and a teen shelter in the city.

Barley makes the interview easy. We get enough laughs and catcalls that we know it’s going well.

We get through all his questions he had prepared me well and I had enough stories ready to be interesting and then the floor is opened, the part I am dreading.

“Why have you shunned all the gay groups on campus before tonight?” The first person asks.

“I just never thought of going. I’m not much of an activist. I was lucky that my first roommate was gay and I had made half a dozen gay friends by the end of the first week. So I didn’t feel the need to join a group to meet similar people.” I say.

“How did you find so many gay friends so fast?” They follow up.

“My first roommate and I held hands at our first dorm meeting and at our orientation tour. After that guys just introduced themselves to us, fortunately we got on well with most of them.” I say.

“Do you experience much homophobia on campus?” The second person asks.

“Last year nothing, this year a bit of name calling. All the guys I live with, including the straight one have experienced it in the last couple of weeks.” I say.

“We’ve had a lot more reports of incidents this semester than ever before, more in the last 2 weeks than the whole of last year. We’re working with the dean and campus security to investigate.” Barley says.

“Did you mean to deprive a student of opportunities when you took the acting prize last semester?” Ben asks.

Terrific. Asshole.

“I declined the prize, as both of us who won already had agents the meetings were given to other students at the festival. Had I known there was an acting prize I would have withdrawn myself from consideration at the start.” I say.

“But you stole those roles from people who needed them. You took them by deception.” Ben follows up and I role my eyes.

“How much did the celeb mags pay you for your lies about me? Stop being so bitter, I took part in an activity open to students and I am a student.” I say.

“That’s the guy. Wow. Okay we have time for one more question before we head off to party.” Barley says.

“Are you single?” The last person asks.

“No, I have a wonderful boyfriend who I adore. He is my everything, he has helped me through my bad times and celebrated the good. We survived long distance this summer which was utterly miserable. I love him, he’s my rock and I hope we never have another day apart.” I say looking straight at Peter who is smiling like crazy.

“And you met him here?” Barley asks.

“Yes on that orientation tour, we were attracted to each other straight away but it took us a few missteps to get there.” I say.

I wait for the room to clear, thank Barley and all the tech guys. I’d arranged to meet the guys at the side door. I’m just heading down when Peter calls.

“Hey you were amazing baby.” Peter says.

“Thanks. Sorry for gushing. Meant it though.” I say.

“Thanks, I feel the same way about you. Jay isn’t feeling good so I’m taking him home. Will you be okay to get a cab or walk?” Peter says.

“Wait, I’ll skip the party. I’m just coming out now. I’ll meet you at the car.” I say.

“Uh we’re home already.” Peter says.

Fuck them. I’m going to party anyway. I head back to Barley and we walk over to the party hall with Patrick and some of their other friends.

Once I’m in there I realize it is so not my scene but I try to make the best of it. I find Felix and Grey and Harry and Bobbie who all say the dutiful nice things. Brian comes over and pulls me aside.

“Jay is really pissed at you.” Brian says.

“Why? What did I do now?” I ask.

“He felt you didn’t make clear how special he is to you, calling him roommate number one. He was especially annoyed when you went overboard about Peter.” Brian says.

“Is Blondie here with you?” I ask.

“No, he is with his roommates tonight.” Brian says.

“Want to get out of here, get some dinner?” I ask.

“Sure.” Brian says.

We head out to noodle place close by.

“Tell me to fuck off if I’m getting to personal but how do you make it work between you, Blondie and Ray? Do you have jealousy issues?” I ask.

“No jealousy, no. During the week Blondie and I are boyfriends, equal partners. I accept he has to do some stuff with his roommates and I don’t ask much about that, it’s not sex anyway and as you now I like space. On the weekends we explore out kinkier side, I’m pretty submissive and we’re trying lots of things, together and with Ray. Ray is Blondies plaything, pet, fucktoy.” Brian begins explaining.

“But Ray is utterly in love with Blondie, he’s okay with not being a boyfriend?” I ask.

“He worships the ground Blondie walks on, he is totally devoted. He is way more submissive than me and loves the way things are, he loves knowing his place is at the bottom of the chain. Honestly the only thing he doesn’t like is not being able to visit more. Hopefully he’ll be able to transfer somewhere near by once he gets his associates this year. I know it sounds strange. I feel strange explaining it but it is what works for us. I’m really happy.” Brian says.

“I can see that. I thought you were happy with Eric but you’re a new guy now. So much more confident. And Peter is working you into good shape.” I say.

“Peter was great this summer, and Jamie. We all needed each other and we became really close. I love that my body is becoming better though I’m struggling to gain weight. Still Blondie likes me as I am, he has Ray for the big muscles.” Brian says.

“Yeah Ray has a great body.” I say.

“So how are things for you? You mentioned jealousy issues.” Brian says.

“I’m trying to let things just happen and I’m trying not to be jealous that Jay always choses Peter and Peter mostly choses Jay. But it’s really hard. It’s hard to know if it will work out or if I should cut my losses now. But I’m not ready to lose Peter yet.” I explain.

“You need to stand up for yourself more. Start saying no. I don’t know what the fuck is going on with Jay. I was talking to Eric, we’re both pretty surprised you’re not all loved up. I wondered if Jay was trying to make you jealous by paying attention to Peter. Maybe he thought he’s get more from you that way. It’s backfired as you just want Peter. I mean Jay has wanted you back for ages, he had no interest in Peter.” Brian says.

“So you think if I start paying more attention to Jay he’ll back off from Peter?” I ask.

“It’s worth a try. If you really want it. But if you don’t have feelings for Jay then you need to stop this.” Brian says.

Brian has given me a lot to think about.

The next day after class Peter and I meet up for coffee.

“I changed my mind about tomorrow. We should have a proper date.” I say.

“Okay, I’d like that.” Peter says.

“What would you like to do?” I ask.

“You.” Peter says grinning.

“Really? Want me to book a hotel?” I ask.

“Nah home is good I love our big bed.” Peter says.

“That is not a date but I’ll take it.” I say.

Our last class on Friday is our lab together. We’re extra affectionate all class, touching his leg or him brushing my cheek, whatever we can get away with.

As soon as we finish he grabs my hand and we head to get our bikes. When we get home Peter is looking decidedly green. I offer to put the bikes away while he heads straight to the bathroom. Poor thing is sick as a dog.

I help him up to our room and put him to bed with a bucket. Glad that our bathroom is just a few steps away. I try my best to make him comfortable he’s got a fever and is struggling to keep water in. Jay comes in and I ask him to leave me to it and sleep elsewhere. I feel like a bitch but I don’t want the bed getting too hot.

Peter is sick all weekend and isn’t looking great on Monday but his temperature is back down and he can finally eat and drink a little. We drive in together as I don’t want him riding when he’s shaky.

“Sorry I ruined our plans.” Peter says.

“It’s okay. You looked after me when I was sick. I at least got lots of alone time with you.” I say.

“I really liked that bit. I liked knowing you were with me all the time.” Peter says.

I track Jay down at lunch and ask him to dinner which he agrees to readily which surprises me.

We go to an Italian place I like, I order a huge tuna salad, feeling starved of greens after existing on snack foods all weekend.

We make small talk for a while before I dive in with my issues.

“I feel like you don’t want me around. I thought you wanted this relationship more to be with me than Peter but it has not turned out that way and I wondered what I’d done wrong.” I say.

“I did come into the relationship because I wanted you. I didn’t care about Peter but I knew he would end it if I monopolised you. I thought if I spent lots of time with him he would be less likely to complain when we spent time together.” Jay explains.

“I get that, and I kind of expected it but why be so shitty with me? Have you fallen for Peter?” I ask.

“You’ve not made a move towards me.” Jay says.

“You literally turn away from me when I try to join in in bed.” I say.

“Ugh I can’t be doing with threesomes all the time.” Jay moans.

“So you do prefer Peter?” I say.

“No. I love you. I want us to be together.” Jay says.

“Just us?” I ask.

“No I like Peter too now. We just need to work things out a bit. Now Peter and I are used to each other we’ll spend more time with you.” Jay says.

“Okay. I was ready to give up.” I say.

“It’ll be okay. I’m sure of it.” Jay says.

The rest of the evening is okay we talk more normally about school and our friends. I’m not convinced Jay is being honest with me. I’m really not sure I care.

The next afternoon I tutor Paul again. I like him he’s funny and hot. He’s catching up fast, which I’m a little sad about as I like spending time with him.

The next week is a little better, I spend a little more time with the guys. Outside the bedroom things are almost back to normal with Peter and with Jay they’re a bit less frosty. In the bedroom, well I might as well not bother getting undressed. I’ve been able to please the guys a little but nothing is reciprocated.

I’m pinning everything on our upcoming weekend alone. I watch the videos Peter sent, one from behind my fingers. I really want to understand Peter better, what turns him on, what I can do that doesn’t push me too far from comfort. I read stories and watch porn and ask questions online. I’ve been out toy shopping. I’m prepared if not at all confident in my plan. I wish we were exploring this together from the beginning, not because it’s what I want to explore but because I feel like I have to jump in deep to make it work for Peter. If I can make it work for Peter then it’ll be easier to convince him to go back to just us.

On Friday morning I’m having breakfast with Peter in the kitchen, we’re being silly feeding each other and being generally affectionate.

“I can’t wait for classes to be done. I get you all weekend.” I say.

“Me too. I’m so, so ready for this, for you. I love you so much.” Peter says kissing me.

Jay comes in.

“Can I have the car keys?” Jay says.

“Are you driving in today? We’ll come, we want to get home fast. Do you need a lift to the airport later? What times your flight?” I ask.

“Uh I’m driving to Marlon’s place.” Jay says.

“No way.” Peter says before I even have a chance to.

“What do you mean no?” Jay says.

“You’re not driving all that way on your own, especially as you’ve not given us time to check the car over. You didn’t even ask.” Peter says.

“The car is practically new. Why would I need to ask? You wouldn’t need to ask.” Jay says.

“I would ask, of course I’d ask. But you arranged this trip before we all got together, surely you had other plans.” Peter says getting louder and louder.

“I was going to get the bus but that was when Brian and Eric were still coming. I don’t want to be on the bus alone for that long.” Jay says.

“Can you get a flight now?” I ask.

“It’s going to cost loads last minute.” Jay says.

“I’ll pay half.” I say.

“That’s not right.” Peter says.

“I really want Jay to make this trip, he’s been looking forward to it for ages.” I say kicking Peter under the table.

He looks at me oddly for a moment then realizes what I’m saying.

“Okay come on lets all look for flights now quickly, we need to go in a minute.” Peter says.

I hand Jay my credit card.

“You have to pay me back your half though.” I say.

“Thanks.” Jay says not sounding too thankful.

I hug Peter from behind.

“Thanks baby, I need this weekend.” I whisper in Peter’s ear.

“Me too baby.” Peter whispers back, giving me a big kiss.

There is no problem getting Jay booked and we head off to class.

I have lunch with Eric, we’re on much better terms now.

“Are you working this weekend?” I ask.

“Yes tonight and tomorrow. Don’t worry I know it’s you weekend with Peter, I’m staying with one of the other dancers tonight. I will on Saturday too if you want.” Eric says.

“Thanks, Brian has said he’ll be at Blondies and Jamie expects to be with his new mystery woman all weekend.” I say.

“Yeah we all want you to sort things out.” Eric says.

“Don’t say anything to anyone but I’ve a plan in place to end things. I’ve book a aparthotel room for a couple of weeks.” I say.

“Good. Though you shouldn’t be moving out but I get it. Do you not think Peter will agree to going back to just you?” Eric asks.

“I think he might. If this weekend goes well I might suggest it but I think I need a clean break, even if it’s just temporary. I don’t want to play games and be testing him but I do want to see what he’ll do, if he’ll stay with Jay.” I say.

“Short term maybe but Jay’s a dick. He won’t put up with him for long. I’ve no idea why you started this thing.” Eric says.

“Jay was different this summer, he was amazing and I totally started to fall for him again. As soon as we got together my feelings vanished. I was an idiot and he totally played me. Hey we’ve all been dicks at times.” I say.

“Yeah I was a total dick this summer, I’m still so embarrassed.” Eric says.

“You’ve pulled it back together now. You’re amazing in the club. I hope we can work on the showcase piece together, I’ve been writing.” I say.

“Cool, I hope so too. I know I’ve not had much time to get together. But it would really help me out, it’s hard to break in to the friendship groups on my course. Though actually you calling Ben out the other day helped, bit of bitchy bonding.” Eric says.

“Have you spoken to Blair recently?” I ask.

“Yes, did you know?” Eric asks.

“Yeah, so will you do it?” I ask.

“I’ve spoken to my advisor and he thinks I should do it. I’d only miss a week of school.” Eric says.

“Yay! Do over on our film adventures. As long as you keep your feet on the ground this time.” I say.

“Will you really miss next semester?” Eric asks.

“I don’t know, I’ll see how this semester goes. It might not be worth starting late if I can’t do the classes I want to.” I say.

Later in our lab together Peter and I are extra flirty with each other. We’re both looking forward to some proper us time and can barely get our work done.

We pick up dinner on the way home. We sit at the table and light candles and have a romantic time.

After we make out on the couch, it’s bliss.

“I have missed this so much. Please don’t make me share you anymore.” I say.

“I’m not making you do anything.” Says Peter.

I press my feelings down once last time and go back to kissing my man.

And we kiss and kiss and kiss.

“I love you baby.” Peter says.

“I love you loads and loads.” I say back.

“I’m looking forward to tomorrow so much.” Peter says.

“I hope I’m not a let-down. I know it won’t be the same for you as other times.” I say.

“Don’t say shit like that. You have to own it else it won’t work.” Peter says.

“Hey tonight we’re boyfriends and you have to be all nice and supportive. Tomorrow is a different matter.” I say.

“I won’t know what’s hit me.” Peter says.

“Oh you will know exactly, over and over.” I say.

“Oh fuck.” Peter says and lunges at me.

“You’ll let me know when we need to stop?” I say.

“I trust you but yes if I need to stop I’ll let you know.” Peter says.

“Though I’m not sure you know how to say it given that black eye you had last semester.” I say.

“Don’t worry, we’re just going to have some fun.”

I push him off the couch and onto the floor.

We roll around the floor kissing and wrestling, pinning each other until we’re tired out.

We sleep in. I wake first and shower, get ready and take things downstairs.

I decide to get things started. I message Peter and tell him he has to be clean and showered and downstairs in 20minutes. In the clothes I’ve left on the bed.

I try and rid myself of nervous energy, I need to be fully in control once he steps in here. It’s just another character to play I tell myself and I’m ready.

Peter comes down on time and I stare at him. He grins then looks down, he’s ready.

“You’ve been very naughty recently. You’ve not given me enough attention. You’ve left your homework to the last minute and you stood me up.” I say as sternly as I can.

Peter stares at the floor. His shorts are tented.

“Do you have anything to say?” I ask.

He shakes his head and stares at the floor.

“Are you sorry?” I ask.

He nods but barely looks up.

“I don’t think you’re very sorry. I think you need some discipline.” I say.

He shakes his head then looks at me pleading. Wow he’s playing his part, I’m almost aroused.

“Take off your shorts.” I say.

He does quickly and folds them up.

I stand in front of him and move my hands to his ass and rub and pinch at his cheeks.

“Do you think you’ve been naughty?” I ask as I continue to caress him.

“I’ve been naughty. I am sorry. I need some discipline.” Peter says quietly still looking down.

The beautiful silk grey boxer briefs I bought for him are straining at the front, they also make his ass look amazing.

“Good boy. Let’s see if we can remind you to be good in the future.” I say.

I lead him to the couch and I pull him over my knee.

I spank his behind firmly but not too hard, 6 times each side before rubbing him letting my fingers enjoy the feel of the silk. Peter yelps a little but not too much, he doesn’t flinch at all.

I repeat the same again, feeling the bounce of his ass then the smooth silk of his underwear. I rub another circle then push my thumb through the fabric of one leg and tear the boxers across the middle.

Peter gulps in surprise.

I rub his bare ass through the hole in the fabric.

“You feel good. We’re just getting you warmed up nicely.”

Peter

I can’t believe he is doing this, he’s amazing. So many things flood my head as we begin, I barely register the slap of his hand until he rips my beautiful new underwear to pieces.

He slaps me again and I begin to focus on the glorious sting. I’m still hard.

He surprises me again reaching in the front of the remains of my underwear with a lubed hand and jerking me, emotionless and firm, it feels amazing. He gets me going a little then the spanking continues, smack, smack, smack he goes, longer this time and I start to soften then he reaches in again, jerking me, adding extra pleasure to counter the sting.

He pulls off the remains of the underwear and smacks me again, harder, firmer. I begin to drift into a zone and my emotions of the last few weeks flood my mind. How much I know Alexander is hurting and how I keep getting it wrong, how I can’t seem to find the words he needs. I need to make it right. This will make it right.

My focus goes as he jerks me again, right to the edge this time, oh fuck that is glorious, then without warning thwack, thwack as a wooden ruler is brought down on me. Ouch the sting I let out small yelps, the hits comes short and fast then again rubbing my ass and rubbing my cock oh, oh, oh, so, so close.

Alexander

He’s mewing, he’s actually mewing as I rub his ass with one hand and his cock with the other, mewing. I can’t believe it.

I take up the ruler again and assault his ass some more, with a few hits on the back of his legs His cheeks have gone from a light blush after my hand to a slightly darker pink.

I’m taking longer breaks between sets, rubbing him, feeling him, trying to be clinical about it and not loving. Again he mews, yelps and mews.

“I don’t think you’re there yet. I think you’re liking this too much. I think you a stronger reminder to be good. Stand up.” I say.

Peter stands and I lead him to the desk. He bends over without asking.

Peter

Alexander is doing better than expected, he’s not talking much which is keeping everything so intense. I’m barely here.

I bend over the desk for him, my cock still dancing from his last stroke when the strap hits the back of my legs and I cry out. Wow he has been shopping. Fuck.

He repeats the pattern, less strokes but the pain is harsher and the jerking is more intense as he’s really bringing me to the edge each time now. Shit he’s working me right over.

I try and breathe, I want to see this through. It’s hard. It hurts. I love it and hate it all at once.

I never believed he’d get me so well so fast.

Alexander

When I can bare it no longer and Peter’s ass resembles that of a baboon I lead him back to the couch.

Back over my knee I keep the slaps short and the stroking long. Then I stand him up.

“Are you ready to be a good boy?” I ask, holding his chin up so he has to look at me.

He nods.

I sit down and pull him into my lap like a baby, I put his arms round my neck and I resume the action on his beautiful dick, bringing him as close as I can several more times before bringing him to the end, when he cums I think he’s more shocked than pleasured. He shoots beautifully. I keep on jerking his cock longer than necessary, he squirms in my lap at the discomfort, his sore ass gives him further discomfort as he wiggles. He lets out all manner of groans and yelps.

I finally let him go and make him stand up one last time.

“You’ve done great today, I love how strong you are. You’ll be a very good boy from now on.” I say and hug him.

He collapses into my arms and kisses at my neck and face. I kiss him back and then lie him on the sofa. He’s looking a bit out of it. I crouch down so I’m level with his face.

“I’m going to let you have a quiet few minutes to think. When you’re ready come up to the kitchen.” I say.

I head upstairs. It’s a nice day for October. I drag a couple of rugs out to the deck then go back inside for a quick shower. I decide to stay nude and am just making some cereal when Peter comes up.

He throws his arms around me and begins to cry on my chest. I worry for a moment but he’s smiling and kissing me with his sticky wet face.

“Shall we get you cleaned up?” I ask once he calms down.

He nods enthusiastically, I take him in the bathroom and wash him with a face cloth, running an icy cold cloth over his still red bottom he mews again.

“Do you need cream my little kitty cat?” I ask.

“ROOOOOAR this big tiger needs cream please.” Peter replies.

I rub the arnica into his cheeks and give him lots of kisses.

We head back to the kitchen and he joins me in a bowl of cereal, eating his standing up.

“I thought we could lie out in the sun as it’s a nice day, do our homework outside.” I say.

“Sounds good. Are we having a nude day?” Peter asks.

“Yes, I’ll clear these up. You go and get our laptops and stuff, mines all in my bag.” I say.

Peter bounces up the stairs happily, after his crying he seems to have a lot more energy.

We lie outside in the nude on our bellies, I run my fingers over Peter’s beautiful globes now and then. We work together on some physics problems and make quick work of it together.

“The upside to having a tiny cock is no one notices when I get an untimely erection.” Robbie says grabbing the front of Dan’s shorts.

They start making out oblivious to us.

“If you guys want to put on a show feel free.” Says Peter cheekily.

“Oh fuck, don’t encourage us, we are total exhibitionists.” Dan says.

“We love to watch.” I say.

Robbie slips off his shorts and sneakers. He is indeed very small, more head than shaft. I’m fascinated.

I lean back to get a kiss from Peter. He can’t stop grinning.

Dan is naked and the pair are kissing on the deck. Robbie, his tiny cock dancing lies on his back on the deck, knees held up wide apart. Dan uses spit for lube and works his way in.

I can’t take my eyes off of Robbie. He’s clearly having great pleasure from Dan. Shocking myself as much as anyone I lean in and take Robbie in my mouth.

“Oh fuck that’s hot.” Says Dan.

“Suck me hard.” Squeals Robbie.

Their reaction relaxes me and I enjoy running my tongue round his ridge and I suck away on his head. Peter moves round and laps at his balls. Dan is clearly delighted and ups the pace.

I move away when Robbie is close to coming and watch the little guy shoot a huge load. Dan pulls out and covers his man with his cream.

“Oh man, so good, so good.” Dan says diving on top of Robbie.

Peter pulls me into a nice kiss and then I think we both feel a bit embarrassed.

“Uh we actually came out to tell you our news.” Robbie says once he’s caught his breath.

“What’s happened?” I ask.

“My screenplay is going in to development and I’m needed out there, I am so excited.” Robbie says.
“And Phil has sold a pilot and has asked me to come join his writing team, he asked both of us but Robbie got his news at the same time.” Dan says.

“Oh congratulations to both of you. When do you go? What about the writing position here?” I ask.

“School don’t expect the yearlong full time commitment. As long as I do the agreed workshops and talks they’re happy.” Robbie explains.

It’s getting colder and the light is going so we say goodbye and head inside.

We put together some dinner and eat a little, then a lot more as half way through we realize we’re both ravenous.

We just need to relax together so find a film to watch, I sit on the sofa and Peter lies on his side with his head in my lap. I feel happy. Really happy.

“We cheated on Jay.” I say.

“What? Oh shit we did.” Peter says.

“Do you think he is doing Marlon?” I ask.

“Nah. They didn’t over the summer so I doubt they will now.” Peter says.

“Will we tell him?” I ask.

“I dunno. Do you want to? It was barely anything.” Peter says.

“I feel bad.” I say.

“Fuck it, we were together, it happened. We’re having a great day lets not think about it.” Peter says.

We relax all evening together and head to bed early. We’re both tired, it was an intense day.

I lie on my back and Peter sprawls across me on his front.

“Still sore?” I ask.

“Not unless I sit on it.” Peter says.

“Was it okay?” I ask.

“Yes, very, very, very, okay. Totally different, totally unexpected, I don’t usually like being held off like that but it was really great. I feel good, really good. My head is clear, I feel confident, sexy, yours.” Peter says.

“Thank-you. I was so worried about getting it wrong. What do you mean unexpected? I tried to do what was in the videos.” I say.

“What? No it wasn’t, what did you watch?” Peter says grabbing a tablet.

I show him.

“I totally sent the wrong links. I’m sorry that middle one was extreme, I would never have suggested that. I don’t know if I’d want to try.” Peter says.

“You don’t mind I got it wrong?” I ask.

“Stop doubting yourself, you should be on top of the world. There isn’t a wrong here, just what works or not and it worked. You got nothing wrong, except this conversation. I love you. I love you even more now. All I want is for you to be happy. I’ll do anything to make you happy.” Peter says.

We sleep in again and mooch about not doing much until Jay gets home.

“Can we all talk?” I say.

We all sit at the kitchen table.

I breathe out slowly and as I’m about to speak.

“We cheated this weekend but it was only a little thing and we’re really sorry.” Peter says in a rush.

I throw him a look and he shrugs.

“Define little.” Jay says.

I burst out laughing and Peter joins me.

“We watched Robbie and Dan fuck and we uh joined them orally.” I say.

“Together?” Jay asks.

“Yeah it really was just a few minutes. It was just an opportunity, if you had been here you’d have joined us.” Says Peter.

“Okay, if you were together and it was just that I’m okay with it.” Jay says.

I’m surprised, I thought he would fit.

“Cool, I told you not to worry. Okay what shall we do tonight?” Peter says.

“Uh Peter, I’m glad that’s out in the open but that wasn’t what I wanted to talk about.” I begin.

“Really? Sorry. Go on.” Peter says.

“It’s no secret that our arrangement is not working out for me. I hate it. I’m very unhappy. So I’m out. I won’t hold you to the rules. If you want to be together that is okay with me, I’m glad you’ve found each other again. I’m moving out for 2 weeks give us all time to adjust. When I get back you’ll have moved out of my room.” I say and stand up to go. The car is all packed with my stuff and I just want to be gone.