I want to be a mother….and I am just 17.
No I am not out of my mind, nor am I planning to have a baby yet, but in future. Maybe when I am 27 or something.
But the point here is that IT IS my dream.
I mean whenever a person asks me what you want to be when you grow up, I simply answer “I want to be a mother”.
Tell me what is bad in that and why do people judge?
They never asked me what career I want to pursue, just what I want to be. And no I ain’t nuts, not at all.
Its just that pregnancy and motherhood fascinate me.

Oh and before I talk about the fascination ahead, tell me why do people just assume I am saying “I want to have sex” whenever I say “I want to be a mother“. Seriously?
People have sex because they want to have sex, not always to have kids. Get over it. Mature!

So where was I? Yeah. Fascination for pregnancy and motherhood. I mean what is there to not be fascinated about.
You have a human developing inside you. Your body has two hearts. Whatever you eat or drink is being shared with a little human, even if you don’t want to share that scoop of chocolate ice cream. You just don’t have an option to not share it. Its so funny. (am i the only one that finds it funny? Okay ). Your breathing for 2 bodies. Your somehow connected to it. A thing growing inside you which would eventually be telling you it loves you mom with its gestures, after a couple of years it would say “your the best mom ever”. You may not be the best daughter, not the best wife, but for that child, that baby you had inside you for 9 months, your the best mom, the most beautiful person,their first love. All the labour you have gone through is forgotten the day the child calls you MOM for the very first time.
You might have fights when the child grows up, but both of you know how much love you have for each other.
The smile on the childs face when you would say “yum” when they try their hands on cooking for the first time, even if its really bad would be equal to the smile you would have on your face the first time they walk.
Being a mother is difficult I know but nothing else is equally rewarding.Being a mother makes a woman stronger than ever. You can hold your baby in your hands the whole day and still be on your feet. To all the weightlifters, can you?
Being a mother makes you glow. The same glow your mother had when you were inside.
If you are a mother be proud.
People who say love at first sight exists claiming that a mother falls in love the first time she sees the infant’s face are obviously not aware of the connection, the bond, the love that started when the human was inside her, just a single cell. They don’t know you loved it even before you saw its face.
I want to say hats off to the females who have adopted children. You are strong. You may not have created that human from a single cell, but you surely will make a good human being. I trust you.I am happy and proud to be a female.
I know half of the males reading this wouldn’t understand my fascination towards motherhood and pregnancy but all the mothers out there would.
People out there think of me as naïve, maybe I am, but I understand that being a mother is a full time duty which people who think being a mother is a joke wouldn’t understand.

Self acceptance.
I throughout my life have been struggling with self hatred.
Any over weight person out there will understand what I am saying. Being fat doesn’t just make you unhealthy but leaves you hating yourself more and more everyday. You start isolating yourself.
I was an overweight child and at that age the children around you aren’t old enough to understand what it feels like when they shout out fatso on top of their voice. You cry and cry in a corner. But you say you are strong and fake a smile and make it seem like everything is alright but your heart knows its not. When your mom asks you is everything alright and you breakdown. You don’t want to go to school. You don’t want to go shopping. You cry in the trial rooms because you are a child but have to wear adult clothes. You shy away from wearing shorts. You shy away from talking to people, making friends because you think all they will see is the fat and not the real you.
But wait. You lost yourself in the journey itself. You now hate yourself. The thoughts inside you don’t reflect the other person’s thought about you but your own! You lost your confidence, your carefree nature, your love for yourself!
All you see you see yourself as is a fat ball.

Now you have to find yourself! Accept who you are and appreciate that.

I had lost myself in the rush of life.
I didn’t have very many friends. I didn’t have a person I could cry my heart out to. I was fat!
I thought me being fat was the reason everyone left me. But I was wrong! The only reason people left me was that I hated myself. All I did was rant!
I hated everyone around me because I hated myself!

But then I had enough of it.
I was no more gonna cry myself to sleep.
I was no more gonna cry for the guy who doesn’t even care.
I was no more gonna cry sor the guy in class that made me feel bad about me.
I was no more gonna cry for the friends that betrayed.
I was no more gonna cry for ths girls who bitched about my weight.I was no more gonna hate me!!

I just did 2 things which actually boasted my confidence, my love for myself.(P.S they are weird but you have to try this if you are struggling with self acceptance)

Stand stark naked in front of the mirror. Stare.
The first few weeks you might not like what you see. you would hate yourself but still do it everyday. You reach a point when you actually start appreciating yourself. You start loving your curves, the flaws, the way your body is crafted. Each flaw, each curve, each mark is a part of you, appreciate it and love yourself. Love the way you are, because if you don’t love the body you are in, you wouldn’t be able to craft it the way you want. may it be gaining muscle or losing weight.

Dance and sing like no ones watching.
I actually mean it!
Lock yourself in a room, turn the music on and start rolling!
I like it when the lights are turned off, in the dark.
Dance to any song, just any! Sing on top of your lungs!
It is a party with your body, soul and mind. They are connecting to one another. Admiring each other and falling in love.
Just sway away!!

You are unique, there is no one out there like you. You are you! Love yourself!

I do! I love myself, though I always would have a regret of not falling in love with myself before. I mean hating yourself is such a painful feeling while loving yourself is the best feeling ever. I regret the time wasted in self hatred.

If you don’t love yourself, you can’t love any one. You have to accept yourself before wanting to be accepted.

I have heard many people say that ‘no, love is not what you need, love doesn’t help you survive, it doesn’t pay your bills, etc.’

Do you agree? Atleast I don’t.

Love, helps you stay sane in times of crisis because you know there is someone you can pour your heart to, someone is there to hug you and tell you that every storm ends with a bright day. Love makes you strong, it encourages you to follow your dreams, it stands by you on the bumpy roads of achieving your dreams.

Love doesn’t pay your bills but it makes you realise your worth and what you are made of, which pushes you forward, nearer to success. It makes you feel complete!

Well having a guy best friend is really fun and amazing, and to be frank this is something many people can relate to. So without saying anything further here are 5 reasons why having a guy friend is amazing,

Egos don’t clash. A guy’s ego clashes with his guy friend, a girl’s ego clashes with her girl friend but in case of a guy-gal friend, egos rarely clash. Continuing from that, fights are never THAT serious (most of them), but even if they are serious, things solve pretty easily as there is no ego problem as compared to a fight with one of your female friends.

A guy friend is the best person to discuss about your boy friend problems as he will be able to tell you what’s going in his mind, I mean being a guy they would think similarly.

Talking is easier. You aren’t continuing bitching about someone like gal friends do, which leads to mental peace (I mean I end up having a headache if I continue bitching for a long time, I don’t like it at all!).

You don’t have to give him gifts, even if it is his birthday (well its true in my case).

You can discuss about sex with him freely. Ask queries about things related to it. Its like seeing sex by a guy’s point of view.

“A good friend will come and bail you out of jail, but a best friend will be sitting next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’!”
― Kate Angell, Curveball

“Seeing longtime couples break up reminds me of what is so often forgotten…that love, relationship love, is an ultra-marathon, not a sprint, and far too many lack the stamina and dedication to keep running together…maybe it means it wasn’t true love, or maybe it just means it’s easier to quit than to keep going, I don’t know, but since I am single I am thinking this is a good place to stay for awhile and if I ever do sign up for another marathon I hope I will be able to see that stamina and dedication in my partner before we begin to run together so that we don’t end up running away from each other.”
― Christian Pilosi

According to me you can be anything for the person you love. If I love someone I would be a sister to him if he wants, go away from him if he wants, be his best friend, anything if thats what he wants and if thats what makes him happy. Your happiness doesn’t matter then. Its second priority. Thats why people say love only happens once. You can give so much selflessly to just one love interest in a lifetime. If you don’t get him and are in a relashionship or married to someone else you are a bit greedy a bit selffish. You WANT the love now you WANT the attention. If I don’t get that person, because you can’t force anyone to fall for you, I would cherish the time we had spent together, be happy that he is happy. At least in future I can say i loved this person truly and purely without any demands. The point is that to me love is soul not life as other people say. For me he is my soul, once the soul is lost my body shall live, my heart shall beat but my soul shall die.

Everyone has different point of views on love and everyone is correct.

Well I haven’t actually ever written about a book, I mean a book review or anything, so well this is my first time, and to be frank this is not a book review. I was not into reading romantic novels at all. I was more into sci-fi mystery sort of stuff. Actually THE NOTEBOOK was my first romantic novel. This book somehow changed the way I think, the way I feel, the way I look at things, everything. It was sort of a life changing book for me. Everyone has that life changing phase, may it be due to an experience, a person, a movie, or maybe a book, like it was for me. The reason I bought this book was its cover, and the fact that girls of my class were gushing about Nicholas Sparks. Before you judge me saying that I judge a book by its cover, I DON’T! I did in this case because it was my first time buying a romantic novel. So yeah as I was saying I bought this book, came home, got comfortable on my beanbag and the once in a lifetime journey began. Yes, it was like A ONCE IN A LIFETIME JOURNEY FOR ME, though now I have read it like 10-11 times but I still remember the way I felt when I read it for the first time. I read MIRACLES (people who have read it would know that it is the 1st page) and started admiring Nicholas Spark’s way of writing, the way he has described THE OLD MAN and the surroundings, the way he has conveyed how many years have gone by, everything. By the time I was at page number 7 i.e. GHOSTS, it was just me and the book. I remember having not eaten anything for 29-31 hours (I don’t exactly remember but it was like more than 1 and a half day or more than that). You could actually feel what Noah’s thoughts, Allie’s dilemma, her fiancé’s jealousy or even the mother’s possessiveness for her daughter. You can not say who was right or who was wrong as everyone was right in their own way, everyone’s feeling were justified. I am a very pessimist sort of person, always looking at the darker side of life, this book taught me TO BELIEVE that everything can be right if you truly want it to be. I did not believe in true love or anything of such sort but this book taught me that love exists. It taught me that if you truly love someone let them go and if it is meant to be you will spend rest of your lives together. It taught me that you don’t have to be together to love each other, you can be at far off places and still be together, you don’t have to be near each other to love. It taught me to keep loving even if I might not get any in return. It taught me to keep trying even if I fail. The main thing it taught me is was YOU ONLY LOVE ONCE! Any relationship before or after that specific relationship is attraction, liking, lust, or maybe somewhat close to love, but never love! If you love someone truly, your life from now is not your own, its theirs’. LOVE IS SELFLESS and if you think you love someone but your life is more important to you than theirs’, then you don’t love that person truly, its just a feeling close to it but not love. The second most important thing it taught me was FOLLOW YOUR HEART!

“Poets often describe love as an emotion that we can’t control, one that overwhelms logic and common sense. That’s what it was like for me. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, and I doubt if oyu planned on fallin gin love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us. We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me, love like that has happened only once, and that’s why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I’ll never forget a single moment of it.” ― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

THE NOTEBOOK according to me is a must read to understand what love is! THANK YOU and keep loving! ❤