HELP

It was 4th grade, I was the youngest in my grade, I loved my life, each day I would wake up, wanting to go to school. Then 1 day this girl just started to harass me, she hurt me PHYSICALLY, she stabbed me with a tack in my hand, it hurt, a lot. She laughed at me and so did everyone else, I was at a catholic school, who does that at a CATHOLIC school? Wasn't God or Jesus supposed to be their role model or something? When I went home i didn't say anything, I thought it was just a joke when she did it. The next day at school, both of my best friends had turned on me.

Why? I don't know, they would call me names with my bully and laugh at me. What did I ever do to them? Again when I went home I didn't say anything, thinking that everything was going to be ok the next day. Nope, it got worse. During recess I would play 4 square with the other girls but, the problem was that my bully would play too. So when it was my turn to play and she was ace, she would say "Pac-man!" (Pac-man is when the Ace would chase you in the 4 square and tag you with the ball.) She would always try to get me out, but she never could, until one day she threw the ball at my face and I fell to the ground, backwards. It hurt and she would just laugh at me, when I cried she laughed even harder.

I didn't know what was happening so I did the same thing, I didn't tell anyone. But, again and again, each day just got worse until I couldn't take it anymore, I finally told someone, my mom, who ended u telling my dad, who ended up telling the Principle, who ended up telling the parents of my bully and the bully herself. I was happy, until the bullying started to get even worse than it already was. This time no one would talk to me, I sat alone at lunch, no one wanted to be my partner in class, no one would play with me at recess and each day my parents would ask me "how was school?" and the same reply was "Great!" with a fake smile on my face. Each day I would cry and cry and cry. An entire school year went by and I was in 5th grade, (this year my scholl was going to close down)The same routine followed, but this time I would come home with cuts and bruises on my knees and my parents would ask me "what happend?" and I would say the same thing " I fell."

Then I realized I was falling under depression, hurting myself, hating myself, wondering "What went wrong?" I had suicidal thoughts, thinking that my life would be easier that way, dead. No one would miss me. I needed and wanted help. I prayed to God trying to pick myself and my life up. One day I couldn't take it anymore, I had the worst day of my life, I thought my life couldn't get any worse that it already was. I tried, I tried so hard to be patient and smile, but I couldn't, I couldn't be patient anymore, I wanted to die, right now. I pretended everything was going to be ok. Then I tried to commit suicide, I took a knife when no one was home and held it against my chest. "No." I finally said out loud. I couldn't do this to myself. My parents would miss me too much, my sisters would cry for hours. I told my parents what was going on and I finally felt better. They asked me if they could tell the principle and I said no. This was my problem and I was going to fix it.

On the last day of school, before my school would be gone forever, I said to my bully, looked her straight in the eyes and said " Have fun spreading hate wherever you go, you made my life a living hell, you are a real bitch, so stay out of my life."

After that I felt amazing. My life got better after that. I love my new school and my new best friends. I picked myself up and felt great about starting a new life.

I was bullied for 2 years and I don't want anyone to ever feel this way.

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