Work, school, sports, clubs, family, and friends can make it seem like you’re being pulled in so many different directions that you have little time to yourself. While being busy isn’t necessarily a bad thing, you shouldn’t let such obligations dominate your life. Doing something new and outside of your daily routine can help you break out of the daily grind. Consider such doable options as starting a new hobby, making spontaneous—and safe!—choices, and shifting your perspective in order to feel more carefree in your everyday life.

Steps

Method1

Choosing the Right Mindset

1

Learn to recognize the things you can’t control. If you were to glance at an inventory of all the things you worry about every day, chances are that you’d find at least half of them were issues you couldn’t control. Worrying about these things isn’t just a waste of time, though: it can also hamper your ability to enjoy things you love like playing sports and hanging out with friends.[1]

For example, catch yourself next time you find yourself agonizing over whether your college application will be accepted of if your soccer game the next day will get rained out. Think about how and why this particular concern isn’t a valid use of your mental bandwidth, and then do a breathing exercise or read a chapter of a book to cleanse your mind.

As you get more practice doing this kind of self-monitoring, you’ll become better and more efficient at it. You’ll be able to recognize futile worries and dismiss them without the aid of breathing or other distracting exercises, and eventually, you’ll find yourself avoiding these worries altogether.

2

Keep school and free time separate. Leisure time is essential for everyone. It affords your stressed-out brain some time to regroup, recuperate, and reinvigorate, while elevating your mood and overall health.[2]
Even if you’re affording yourself plenty of recreational time outside of school, though, you might not be taking full advantage of it.

For example, if you’re thinking about your Biology exam while halfheartedly watching a movie with friends, you’re actually cheating yourself out of the benefits of meaningful relaxation. Make a rule with friends and family that down-time stays down, so no school topics or grade-stressing allowed!

3

Write down your worries in a journal. It may seem counterintuitive, but devoting your worries to a journal or blog can make a huge impact on your stress levels. You get to reflect on them and understand what things typically trigger your anxiety. Just be sure to let your worries go after writing them down: allow yourself to worry for the time it takes to write your journal entry, but call it quits once you’re done. Watch a movie, read a short article on your favorite website, or go for a jog to clear your head.[3]

For example, devote a chunk of your daily entries to problems and frustrations from the day. After writing about other things, write something like, "I've been feeling really bogged down by soccer practice recently. I want to hang out with friends more, but it seems like all my day is devoted to this one activity. I almost told my parents that I want to quit, but I don't want them to be mad at me." Talking through your thoughts and impulses will help you to process your emotions and decide the right way to address your stress.

Studies have shown that it can also help to physically “throw away” negative thoughts. For example, if you write a particularly negative journal entry wherein you vent personal doubts and insecurities, try an exercise where you rip out the entry and throw it in the garbage or burn it. This symbolic gesture can make you feel cleansed of negativity and refreshed from the release.[4]

4

Evaluate effort rather than results. While it’s good to try to get good grades, you shouldn’t worry too much about the letter grade you receive for a particular assignment. Rather, you should focus on the effort you put into researching and writing a paper or studying for an exam. This effort-not-outcome approach has been shown to help process failure in a productive manner while wasting minimal thoughts and energy on things you can’t control.[5]

For example, if you dedicated many hours of time to a research paper but only received a B- from the teacher, congratulate yourself for the honest effort you put into it rather than berating yourself for the letter grade.

In the same way, if you got an A on an exam for which you barely studied, don’t crow over your victory. Dismiss any positive results you attain if they were achieved through insignificant effort.

5

Reassess your goals. Setting goals constitutes an important and beneficial part of life: it encourages success, focuses behavior and attention, and builds self-esteem.[6] That being said, not all goals are created equal: stressing out over goals which aren't actually important to you adds unnecessary guilt and pressure to your life while planting the seeds of conflict in your future. So, next time you're stressing over getting into Advanced Physics, ask yourself why you're doing so: is it because you truly care about the subject, or is it because your mother expects you to get into a prestigious Engineering program at university?

If you think your goals for going to business school or getting a sports scholarship come from your parents’ wishes and not your own, try talking to them about your feelings. Chances are, they worry more about your happiness and sense of fulfillment than they do the specific nature of your professional or sports career.

For example, find a quiet time after dinner or before bed when your parent isn’t distracted by work or household problems. Approach your parent and say, “Hey, can we talk about my plans for college? I’ve been thinking that I’m not so sure I want to go into Business as we had planned. What do you think?” Be calm, respectful, and open to their opinions, but also firm about asserting your own point of view.[7]

6

Practice breathing exercises and meditation techniques. Mindfulness exercises like meditation and controlled breathing can be useful. The tangible benefits of these mental exercises has been well documented. In addition to making you feel more centered and clear-minded, it can help lower your blood pressure and anxiety while boosting your immune system.[8]

These exercises are deceptively difficult to master, so make sure you start out small. Find a few quiet minutes in your day when you can practice some slow breathing and focusing on your breath and body posture, and then slowly work up to deeper meditation techniques.[9]

Method2

Being Spontaneous

1

Mix up your daily routines and tasks. It can be easy to fall into a rut with your schedule and feel like every day resembles the one before. Just because many of your daily activities are the same, though, doesn’t mean that your routine has to be unchanging and boring. On the contrary, even little variations in your routine can make a big difference in your life, making you pay sharper attention to what you’re doing and think more creatively about your work and life.[10]

Simply trying a new cuisine for dinner can inject variety into your life while motivating you through the less exciting, mandatory segments of your schedule. For example, schedule dinner with some friends at a new restaurant so that you have this exciting prospect to look forward to after school or soccer practice.

If you’re feeling bored with your daily jog or workout routine at the gym, try something different like a pilates class or try a new weight machine! You’ll work new muscles, re-engage your mind, and maybe even meet some new friends.[11]

2

Take up a new hobby. Studies have shown that new hobbies and skills can elevate your self-esteem, amp up your energy levels, and make you feel more satisfied with life. And, while you might think your day is already jam-packed with class, sports, and other extracurricular activities, you’d be surprised how little time a new hobby can demand from you and how much it can add to your life.[12]

For example, if you have work or club commitments until dinner time, think about trying out a low-key hobby that you can do at home, either alone or with other family members. Jigsaw puzzles, complicated card games like bridge, knitting, and cooking are all rewarding, affordable hobbies which are easy to fit into the evening.

If you’re already overextended in your evenings, think about whether or not you could fit something into the morning hours before school. For example, swimming, jogging, and reading are all beneficial health-wise, and they can also have a positive influence on your mood and performance throughout the rest of the day.

3

Say 'yes' to new opportunities. It might seem like your daily routine is monotonous through no choice of your own—that is, it seems like you’re required to do the same things every day and given little opportunity to do something different. You’d be surprised, though, how many opportunities you turn down in favor of maintaining your routine. Saying ‘yes’ more often can relieve pent-up stress, broaden your horizons, and bolster your self-esteem and interest in life.[13]

Just because you take your friend up on their last-minute invite to a concert or hockey game, doesn’t mean you have to slack on your other responsibilities. Make a deal with yourself to do your homework in the car on the way to the concert, or ask a family member to cover your afternoon babysitting gig.

4

Try adventurous activities. Many activities are too expensive or impractical to turn into regular hobbies—for example, hot air ballooning, white-water rafting, or skydiving—but there are also plenty more affordable options, such as hiking, camping, geocaching, and laser tag. These kinds of exciting, outdoorsy activities have been shown to have long-lasting impacts on people’s lives and perspectives, making them feel more appreciative about what they have, less bothered by petty concerns, and more self-confident about their abilities.[14]

If money is an issue, save up over time for big recreational treats like helicopter rides or rafting. Tell your parents about your goal and ask if they’d be willing to contribute to your savings if you consider it a birthday or holiday present.

Method3

Maximizing Your Time

1

Do fun things that make you laugh. While it’s important to follow through on your commitments and fulfill your responsibilities, it’s also important to do things that you love. Carve out a portion of each day when you can participate in activities which make you laugh and feel happy, even if you can’t get school credit for them or put them on your college application. After all, time spent laughing doesn’t just cheer you up in the short-term: it also stimulates blood flow and oxygen levels, thus reducing physical and mental stress.[15]

If it feels like you can’t find a spare minute in the day, try to combine your recreational activities with things you have to do. For example, let yourself watch your favorite comedy while you run on the treadmill or make posters for your school club.

2

Spend less time with people who make you anxious. Most people have a friend or two who stresses them out. Maybe they make every situation dramatic, or they demand tons of emotional energy from you, or they tend to say passive-aggressive things that make you feel insecure. Whatever the case, you can lower your stress levels significantly by cutting these people out of your life and spending time with those who make you happy, energized, and positive about life.[16]

If you know a friend makes you anxious or sad, but you don’t want to lose them entirely, try talking to them. Say something like, “I really value your friendship, but I get stressed out when you say mean things about our other friends. Could you tone it down so that we can continue to hang out in the future?”

3

Simplify your life. In general, it’s good to be busy. A full schedule helps you avoid boredom and fight depression, but it can also apply unhealthy amounts of stress on your life and mind. Ask yourself how many of your commitments make you feel good and rewarded, and if any of them seem to strain you more than the others. If one or more of your activities stress you out and keep you up at night, you should consider cutting them out of your life. This simplification will free up some time in your schedule to do something you love, as well as make you more productive and engaged in the activities you continue.[17]

This doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing negotiation. For example, if you feel your babysitting workload or volunteering is taking up too much time but you still love it in principle, consider reducing your weekly hours. Ask a coach, parent, or boss to help you tweak your schedule to make it more manageable and rewarding.

4

Do regular physical exercise. It might seem that physical exertion will sap your energy and make you feel even more exhausted, but in fact regular physical exercise will energize your body, increase your stamina, and positively impact your mood. Aim to get at least twenty minutes of aerobic exercise—for example, jogging, brisk walking, or cycling—a day in order to release natural endorphins, improve performance and brain power, and boost your immune system.[18]

If you already spend a lot of your time shut up alone in your room doing homework or studying, consider taking up a group physical activity such as rowing or yoga. This will give you all the physical benefits of running or cycling while also providing a valuable social stimulus.

5

Get nine hours of sleep a night. According to recent studies, teenagers are one of the most sleep-deprived demographics in society. This lack of sleep both reflects heightened stress levels and causes them.[19] Not only does this nine hour downtime allow your brain and body some precious time to unplug from daily worries, it also enhances your performance in school and sports while brightening your overall mood.[20]

Some concrete ways to improve sleep include being more active during the day, limiting caffeine intake, and removing distractions such as laptops and television in the bedroom.[21]

If you’re feeling sleepy in the middle of the afternoon, don’t assume you have to fight through the drowsiness. Instead, take a twenty-minute nap to recharge your energy reserves and freshen your perspective on the task at hand.[22]