…the literary wanderings of Brian G Ross

My friend Steven was over from Canada for a flying visit last weekend. I’ve known him for half of my life, and the last time I saw him was here, over three and a half years ago. We have not kept in touch as often as we probably should have, but that’s more my fault than it is his. Still, it’s good to know that with some friends you can just fall back into your relationship no matter how long it has been dormant.

Over a lovely Italian meal and some adult beverages we caught each other up on where our lives are currently and – as most friends our age do – spent some time reminiscing about the old times as well. If nothing else, what the conversation did show me, was that I am in a much better place emotionally than I was in 2014, and that can only be a good thing.

Unfortunately I have not made the trip to North Bay to visit him in the near decade since he has been overseas, but with the promise of free accommodation should I ever pitch up on his doorstep, the temptation is always there.

My personal life is (finally) great, and after a long time in the wilderness, I have a job that I actually enjoy and that doesn’t expect my soul in return for my payslip every month. The only point of this triangle currently amiss is my writing.

This year started off with promise. I finished Slipwater – a novel I am extremely proud of – and it has been sitting with a number of agents since early February, but since that feeling of accomplishment I have not done much to maintain the momentum. A short story here, a revision or two there, but that’s about it.

Well that stops today.

I received another rejection letter this morning. I’ve been getting them for over half my life now. No big deal: that’s just part of the constant struggle for acceptance… and I don’t only mean acceptance of a particular story, but also the wider definition of every writer’s desire to have his or her words heard, and for them to mean something to someone.

But this rejection is one too many, so I need to pull my fingers out of my ass and put them on the keys again.

A new line-up it may have been, but they were every bit as talented and enthusiastic about the Eagles legacy as I had come to expect. Three of the six on stage were younger than I am, which is simultaneously good to see, but also a little disheartening to be reminded of my advancing years in such an innocuous manner.

The one guy on the entire upper level who decided to stand and shake his tailfeather was right behind me – drunk, and shouting all of the right words, in all of the wrong notes. At one point he slapped me in the back of the head, and I turned around to find out what the hell his problem was, only to find that the staggered seating had me staring directly at his gyrating crotch. I never did ask him, and for what it’s worth he just kept on thrusting.

The first half of the performance was taken up with a celebration of the Rumours album which is now forty years old. As such, they performed every song, featuring one of my favourite Mac tracks, the Stevie Nicks fronted Gold Dust Woman. It’s no secret that I think Stevie has one of the sexiest vocals in rock music, but Jess Harwood – the girl who embodies her on stage – runs her pretty damn close.

I got a letter from my dad today, which would not have arrived as such a great surprise had my father not died in 2004… and this letter had been written at least five years before that.

In the two pages of emotive prose, my father apologises, says that he loves me, and basically asks for forgiveness in a way that he would never have been able to do in person. He also left his address and phone number should I ever wish to get back in touch and rebuild a few of the bridges he had spent years burning.

At the end of the letter, in capitals, are the words EDDIE LIVES! It’s a phrase that means nothing unless you’ve seen Eddie & the Cruisers II… something which carries a crazy ironic weight, because that movie was about a famous singer presumed dead only to be discovered alive twenty years later.

Of course, I didn’t get the chance to reconnect because the letter was kept a secret from me for two decades. Maybe I wouldn’t have contacted him at all; or perhaps I would have done so just to tell him to fuck off. The truth is I don’t know how I would have reacted twenty years ago, but the point is, it should have been my decision to make, and not just another skeleton in an already bone-riddled closet.

But let’s be honest, that’s a little like showing your mum your homework and having her pat you on the head and say that it’s good… isn’t it? (I’ve heard) that women can fake orgasms, so I’m sure they can feign a little glowing praise in other departments too if required.

Still, it is extremely gratifying for someone to recognise the hard work that has gone into producing it – even if she is just keeping me sweet because Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. There are worse things that she could lie to me about!

I only hope that I find an agent or editor who is as enthusiastic about Slipwater as she has been, because if I do, I’ll be a very happy little writer indeed.

A fast-paced police thriller at its core, with science fiction undertones, Slipwater is above all else, a tale of love lost, and hope regained. It is the story of one man’s blind desire to chase the second chance at the life he saw ripped away, no matter what the cost; and of his best friend’s quest to stop him.

That is part of the synopsis for Slipwater that I have sent off to five agencies over the last few days, along with either the first three chapters or the opening 10,000 words.

Agencies (and publishers, should you choose to go to them directly) dont want the entire manuscript, and that’s fair enough. I’m sure you know if you’re enjoying a book before reaching the end, and similarly, they don’t need to read every word you have written to know if it’s any good. What they ask for does however seem like a narrow window: a lot of stories are only just taking the training wheels off at that point. But, this is not my game, and these are their rules.

The girlfriend is currently reading it as well. She says she is enjoying it, but then again… she has a dog in this race, so it will be difficult for her to be completely blunt and honest. Hopefully there are no glaring plot holes or silly continuity errors that I inexplicably missed in all my edits – and I don’t think there are – but however she responds to it, it will be good to hear the opinion of someone who doesn’t know what is coming next.

Post navigation

I am a Scotland based Australian with over 100 publications - humour (Defenestration) to horror (Murky Depths), mystery (FMAM) to mainstream (Underground Voices), and everything in between. My work also appears in several paperback anthologies, including Read by Dawn (Volume 1, 2, 3), The One That Got Away, and Damnation & Dames.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive new post notifications by email.