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Rosé Jelly Beans Are Here

Labor Day is behind us, which means that the time for rosé, better known as “summer water” in some circles, has passed. Or has it? Well, if Jelly Belly has their way, we won’t just be drinking rosé this fall, but eating it.

That’s because the candy company who’s never met a potential jelly bean flavor it didn’t like (including draft beer and Tabasco) will be launching a rosé flavor in October. Though this pinkish wine variety can feature a variety of flavor profiles, these rosé beans are informed by a sparkling variety that a press release describes as “deliciously dry, yet sweet.”

As you’d expect, the presentation really leans into the whole “wine, but jelly beans” thing. They’ll be available in miniature 1.5 ounce bottles, the perfect format for wedding and shower gifts. If you want to go bigger, you can opt for the larger 5.6-ounce wine bottle that comes with a foil-wrapped neck. But you won’t just be popping the cork and guzzling those beans all at once, because the larger bottle is actually stuffed with “20 petite bags ideal for snacking and sharing.” And degenerates who don’t care about presentation can just buy ‘em up in bulk.

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Since you’re already wondering, let’s just get it out of the way now: no, there’s no booze in these rosé jelly beans, since “all flavors of Jelly Belly jelly beans, including rosé, are free from alcohol.” Feels like a real missed opportunity! At least there’s no gluten in there, for what it’s worth.

So if you’re looking for a fun little gift or the perfect source of sugar to keep the party going after bottomless brunch is over, Jelly Belly wants you to say “yes way” to jelly beans that fall somewhere on the spectrum between white and red wine. I can only imagine that a spiked seltzer (non-alcoholic) jelly bean is already in the works.