New Chelsea Drama As 'Guus Hiddink' Discovered To Mean Something Rude In Holland

There was a new twist to the Chelsea managerial saga this morning, when language experts who had worked through the night discovered that the strange-sounding name of the new boss, Dutchman Guus Hiddink, means something rude in Holland.

Hiddink, 26, took over the reins this week from sacked former coach Scolari, and was due to watch his team in their FA Cup fifth round tie at Watford today, but the discovery has shaken Stamford Bridge to its foundations, and owner Roman Abramovich is said to be "livid" at the news.

Dutch is a bit of a funny language all round, and, although details of the meaning of Hiddink's name have not been released, you can be sure it must be something pretty disgusting.

One of the linguists, Dr Johan Broffelcreeper, explained:

"We can't say what it means, but it's pretty filthy, and it would be extremely dicey to explain it to those of a nervous disposition."

Hiddink, who has taken the Chelsea role on temporarily, is still the full-time coach of Russia where, apparently, his name means something even more lewd!

The news is just the latest in a series of such cases which included the name of previous boss Avram Grant, whose name was found to mean 'Hangdog Expression' in Hebrew.

Make Mister Meaner's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

Las Vegas, NV Las Vegas casino owners concluded a study and released the findings today. They found that gambling on anything, but especially sports, is very therapeutic and has many benefits, including lowering the risk of heart attack, stroke, and...

TALLAHASSEE - In 2012, Winston was accused of sexual assault by a female student. The medical examination showed the victim had injuries indicative of sexual trauma; in addition, the victim identified Winston as the attacker. However, the Tallahassee...

Like all businesses, publicity is an important part of the NFL. So important that the NFL is holding a mandatory owners meeting on Monday after the Superbowl to discuss publicity for 2015.
"2014 was such a great year with Ray Rice, a gay player,...

The NFL is now extensively testing players before football games for marijuana usage. This is a recent policy change.
National Footbal League Commissioner Roger Goodell gave an explanation. "The problem with Cannabis is that it is a 'peace" induc...

The Miley Cyrus ban by the Dominican Republic is sidetracking the conversation at the NATO summit currently being held at the Celtic Manor Golf Resort in Newport, Wales, the home of the 2010 Ryder Cup won by Europe 14 ½ to 13 ½ when Hunter Mahan yip...

MANHATTAN -- NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has announced that he will no longer penalize players for domestic violence, noting that consuming large doses of performance-enhancing Red Bull tarnishes the integrity of the game much more than smacking a...

Foxborough, MA - During Friday's post-practice interview, Patriot's head coach, Bill Belichick stated that he would "bet my hoodie that we take home the AFC championship this year." These are strong words from a reserved coach who has coached th...