But Chipper's a compassionate conservative, so instead of firing his shotgun into the air or unleashing coyotes on them, he just gathers them all up in the back of his truck, gives them some food and water and immediately calls the border patrol to properly dispose of them. What else is he supposed to do?

People say that it's mean to call the border patrol, but who else are you gonna call? I mean, I'm not gonna spend my whole offseason driving illegals back…"