I wish to end my neighbours
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Page 2

Think I'm on the verge of initiating beef with my neighbours. Always felt that being on good terms with your next door neighbours is of high importance and it can literally ruin your life if you're not, but I've had about as much as I can take.

Basically, the front fence between our houses was in a sorry state when we moved in, and when I met my neighbour for the first time, literally the first thing he said to me (in quite an arsey way) was "you need to sort that fence out".

Thing is, we didn't really have the money to do it, and it wasn't actually dangerous or anything, so we left it until other more pressing things with the house had been fixed.

So after three years of him occasionally bitching at me about the state of this fence, we've finally replaced it with an absolutely bog standard little picket fence, not unlike this. Finally I thought the matter could be put to bed.

Just found our that he's had a go at my wife saying the fence is spikey and dangerous, and that we need to replace it.

I can't see any way forward other than for me to tell him to fuck right off.

The fence is kinda on both people's land, but it's become established over time that it's the responsibility of my house. It's a little ambiguous though as it's not in either deeds so it's an odd one.

But anyway, I'm happy to take responsibility (and have) but yes, that being the case he can actually fuck off telling me what I can and can't have. It's not like I've put an electric fence up. It's a standard picket fence. It's not dangerous at all.

Think I'm going to give him the option of reimbursing me for the fence and then he can do whatever he wants there instead, or shutting the fuck up about the fence forever. Seems fair to me.

Does he have a valid reason for being worried about a spiky fence? Tiny kids, or whatever? Or is he just a serial moaner?

We had a guy over the back from us used to moan continually about our large conifers blocking out the light from his garden, despite the fact that we trimmed them twice a year. When we had the extension built we had them all cut down and a six foot fence put up instead (conifers are DAMNED EXPENSIVE). And then he moaned about the lack of privacy and planted some big trees of his own.

If the fence is like the one in your picture then I imagine even the smallest of toddlers is just going to knock it down rather than become hideously maimed. It's not like it's made of metal and set in concrete or anything.

I suspect you have a perfectly valid case for telling him to go fuck himself.

I'm fed up of the police being called out on my neighbours to the left. We hear them arguing all the time and there were some guys shouting for some reason outside their house just last night. The woman who lives there was led away by the police in handcuffs at the end of last year, and a few weeks back we had CID knocking on our door asking if we knew where they were.

Haha they love a good moan don't they? We had an argument when my patents put up a conservatory about "blocking the light" and privacy when they were in their kitchen. It's made of glass you morons and why would we want to sit and watch you old bastards making your dinner?! We could do that already from our garden!

Old neighbour on other side maintained that we were slagging her off constantly and would sit with a glass against the wall whenever we had dinner...

Tell him to get fucked! To be perfectly honest though, any fence you put up, he should be coughing up 50% of the cash. Tell him if he wants to put up a more significant structure you'll pay half. That should shut him up.