It was a weird feeling for Zander to be living in one of the houses in the victors village. They were all so new and none had been lived in. Zander was the first and hopefully not the last to move in here as the responsibility o becoming a mentor was on his shoulders now. He hoped that he could save more tributes from his district. Feeling the soft bedding of his new bed on his back as he laid in his new room looking up at the ceiling. No longer he would have to share everything with Zarah. If only he hadn't had to kill to get to this point. A sigh escaped the seventeen year olds mouth as he laid on his bed in silence.

Hark had on a white tee and jeans, with boots. He combed through his hair a few times, made sure it looked perfect, and made his way over to Zander's place. District Eight's first Victor. Wow. What a feat. Hark saw the huge gates, and was amazed by them "Victors' Village". Now that Zander had won, he could come over his home a lot, and play games, have some real fun. Because now that Zander was back, they'd have a lot of time to spend together this Summer. Hark walked up to the door and knocked on it, hoping that Zander was home.

Zander heard knocking on the front door but he just let his sister get it not feeling too happy. Zander was feeling gloomy ever sense he made it out of that death trap of a arena. Zander heard people coming so he turned on his side away from door hearing a few words." Just to warn you Hark ...he has been a bit gloomy sense you know what happened....so don't expect smiles." Zander mumbled under his breath as he turned his head to look at the visitor in his doorway." Hello Hark... " A slight smile came over him before he looked at his hands and noticed he was still wearing the token he gave him." How have you been? " Looking up at him and trying to put on a smile even though he still felt guilty for what he has done.

When the door opened, Hark found Zander's sister standing there. She then told him that Zander was upset. He had won the Hunger Games, the first ever win for District Eight. Why would he be upset? For what reason? "Thank you," he said as he walked through the door. Zarah then gave him directions to Zander's room, which he followed. He saw him sitting there. So down. So quiet. So.. unlively. "Hey," he said with a smile. Maybe he had missed Hark, was that the problem? If so, Hark would give Zander whatever he wanted. "I've been good. Just worried about you, until after the Games that is. How are you?" he asked. He could see that Zander's smiling was a little different than usual. The teeth were real, but his eyes were shaky, and not real at all. "You seem distant, did I do something?" he asked.

As he looked at Hark in his doorway to his room he felt guilty for being to see the people he loved and the others tributes couldn't. Zander loved the house but it was that feeling of guilt that was keeping him from enjoying it. The image of throwing the dagger at Ramsey and then at that poor Iris's throat just kept going." Hey Hark...Come in, Sit." The victor scooted over on his bed even though it wasn't needed. The bed was big enough to easily it two if he hadn't moved. His ears heard that Hark was worried about him. Zander had heard the same from his sister about his attitude change. He wanted to be happy for them....but the guilt had him chained and anchored with the weight of now being a mentor." You sound like Zarah." He let a laugh come out but it was not joyful...just sort of forced and hollow. His smile was also forced as Zander was just scared about the weight of being a mentor and the guilt of living. Zander looked at Harks eyes when he heard the boy ask if it was him. " No no no....its not you...its just.. " A sigh escaped his lips." I need somebody to hug me and to talk too." The young victor looked at Hark sort of asking for a hug before putting his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands sighing into them sad and gloomy." I think that person should be you Hark." He mumbled sniffling into his hands.

Hark did what Zander said, and went to sit next to him. He hasn't seen him in ages. "I missed you." he said. "And she's a smart girl," he stated. Having similarities with Zarah Zalver, at least from what he's seen, is a compliment. She's a good person. She's strong, a fire, but can contain it, and release it when needed. Now that Zander was a mentor, every year he'd be leaving Hark, so he wanted to spend as much time with him as possible before he got pulled away by the Games again. Hark saw Zander begin to cry and was confused. "Why are you so upset? I'm here now. Do we need to talk about something I don't know about?" he asked. Zander said "I think that person should be you Hark." As if there was another person he was with. But that couldn't be right. Zander was an angel. All the Zalver's were. Hark tried to erase the thought, but what was going on didn't add up.

Zander kept rubbing the token on his bracelet as he sat and looked at his hands. Then there was always the fear how Hark would react when he told him what happened with Fabian. It was something Zander couldn't forget and it weighed more then the mentor or the killing. He cheated and deserved it if Hark never wanted to see his face again. He nodded at Hark taking about his sister. " I missed you too." His hand touched Hark's when the words got to Hark asking if there was anything he didn't know. Yes there was something he didn't know and it was breaking Zander at the thought of what he might say or do." Yes there is something you should know." Lifting his head out of his one palm and holding Harks hand that he was touching. This was hard.. but he had too." I'm upset because I murdered three people...and... because... I-I slept... with ...someone." Zander teared up with guilt but he had just said it. Wiping a tear off his own face as he felt better that he told but guilty." I'm so sorry Hark."

Hark listened as Zander spoke. He wanted to help him in any way he can. When Zander started talking about killing people, his face grew sad. However, he had to get out of that hellhole somehow. One way or another. Live, or die. He just wanted to live. Hark was grateful for him. Then he said that he slept with someone. "The Capitol doesn't have more than one bed, I see. They made you and the girl share a bed?" he said with a laugh. He didn't know why Zander worried about it. He didn't care, they didn't do anything. Hark didn't know what Zander really meant. He smiled and thought "We're catching up quickly,"

Zander was expecting possible anger with possible crying. What he had done could be unforgivable but hopefully Hark could understand. He thought he was going to die and he didn't want his last to be with someone he didn't care about? That sounded stupid and as if he had fallen in love again...which he had but he was just emotionally torn at the moment. The dark eyes boy looked at Hark with confusion at his joke. He must of not understood.. and now he would have to explain or make it clear. This made him afraid and feel sadden so." My sweet Hark....what i mean is...I had.. " He let a sigh out as this was hard for him to want to tell him. But he had too. "I had sex...with someone is what i mean." The words fumbled out as he looked at his face trying to see if it would hint how he would take it." Hark.. I'm so sorry that I did." Guilt came over him more with a wave."Please...please forgive me." He spoke with sadden eyes as he looked his eyes.

Hark got up from off of the bed. He looked out into the lit hallway. Zander got all of this. The riches. The fame. The fortune. He had it all. He could get whatever he wanted, when he wanted it. Hark still faced the hallway. "You-- sweet?" he asked. "How dare you call me sweet. My name is Hark. Hark Warner. I thought you'd know this by now, but I don't think I deserve to be cheated on." he stated. Hark was upset. His eyes were wide, his skin was turning red, and there was a spark that was ready to blow. "Who was it? What made you do it? Did you call him sweet too?!" he asked firmly. Hark shook his head. "There's nothing left to forgive." he said in a clam voice.

Zander could only listen to Hark's reaction. It was understandable for him to react this way. Zander expected this and only listened as Hark talked until he was asked a question. He didn't want to say anything else that could easily make this worse." I know you name is Hark...and no I didn't." His brown eyes watched Hark as he faced the hall. His eyes were filled with guilty tears as he started to speak." It was the new escort. I was just drunk and scared after being used by the district three tribute." He looked down at his token with the wave of guilt and then looking at Harks back again." I-I was just scared and drunk... " Zander felt horrible but he hoped Hark could forgive him for the wrong he did. It wasn't like he could not have escaped that restroom. He had went along annoyingly for a alliance that didn't even happen. What happened with Fabian... that was liquor and feelings for him that Zander was so confused about.

He had been drinking? "You were just in a mindset that you'd never get another chance. I get it. But why you just didn't want it to be with me. I don't know." he said. Hark still faced the same direction as he spoke. "He used you.. Aren't you using me right now.." he stated. Hark felt betrayed. He had composed himself for some time and to find out something like this. He could have hooked up with someone. But he didn't. Only for Zander. "And you decided to do it with someone from the Capitol that you just met?" Hark walked out into the hallway with his back still facing Zander. He was still in the doorway.

Zander continued to look at Harks back. He was hesitant with words now that he got the message of how he felt. He probably felt betrayed of Zander's actions. The brown eyed lad had thought Hark always stayed true and this is how he repaid him. If only Hark had been there...or known what Zanders feelings were in that if I die moment. Getting off the soft bed and standing now looking at Hark's back still."I wanted it to be with you." He spoke but it if Zander didn't think he was going to forgive him. What was the point in trying? Because he still loved Hark that's why. The next state urked Zander to the point of driving him to walk past Hark and facing him while he was in hall with both hands both sides of the doorway." No I'm not using you." Looking into the eyes while he spoke his statement. " I'm not sleeping with you when your under the influence and emotionally torn into a million pieces." Zander felt like maybe if he could get Hark to understand the circumstances that he could understand. He had been drunk and shattered into pieces and he had sex with Fabian when he was torn.. Hark didn't need to know that he had grown feelings for Fabian. Right now Zander just wanted Harks forgiveness and he thought maybe that everything else would be ok." I didn't decide... I was under the influence and in a emotional storm." His eyes begging as he stayed in the doorway not wanting Hark to storm off if this kept going the way it did. "Your the only one I want to be with Hark"

Hark's eyes began to water. He didn't know what to do. From what it sounded like, Zander just wanted to see what it felt like? But he was thinking of Hark the whole time? "But.. your lips. The same ones that touched mine. Touched another man's." he said. Hark was torn. He didn't know what route to choose. He wanted to stay calm, but there was so much that he wanted to say. What was the solution to this? Hark and Zander had been together a long time. And out of the two of them, you'd think that Hark would slip off track first. But it ended up being Zander. Maybe he'd just do anything before he went into the Arena because he thought that he would die anyway? "So when you see him again.. the escort. You two won't have words. He knows this?" Hark asked. Was Zander making this up? Was he lying? Did he just want to trick Hark into believing him? Had he been cheating on him the whole time? This situation just make Hark rethink their whole relationship. What was real? What was fake? "You kissed me. Before you left. Tell me, Zander. Was that.. Was it real?" he asked. "Tell me the truth, I just want to know." he said. How did Zander have sex with a man at least twice his age, the world would never know. And Hark wouldn't either. "That feeling.. That burning sensation you get.. When you love someone.. Isn't just off of alcohol, Zander. You did have feelings for him." he said. "Or else you wouldn't be trying so hard to prove it to me that you don't now." he said. The tears began running down his face, as his body grew dark in despair.

Zander was trying to not cry. Part of it was because he could tell that Hark seemed emotionally torn. Like he did when the cause of this problem happened. He felt horrible for having done it and now that he saw what he caused he would never do it again. It wasn't like he had gotten up and said HEY I'm going to cheat on the person I love. But he still did it.. and it changed everything." Yes he knows this.. he felt bad about it as well." Zander was referring to the way Fabian had wanted him and Hark to get back together. To not let him or anything else tear them apart. Zander hoped to the sky that Hark could forgive him. He knew he would probably need time and that It wouldn't just happen but Zander could wait. Zander would wait however long it took until he was back with Hark. He loved him and didn't want to let him go. Tears wanted to spew down the boys eyes but he kept wiping them quickly. Then he heard Hark sound as if he was questioning the kiss he gave him when he got his token and hearing the words I love you Zander Zalver. It was the truth now that he still loved Hark Warner.. if only Hark would still love him for his wrong and forgive. " When I kissed you it was so real. I meant everything in that magical moment...and I mean everything now." Zander looked at Hark now that he had walked around him and was facing him it was easier talking to him now that he knew he wouldn't just leave in the midst of this. Even though he had all right to do so. Zander didn't know how to reply to asking if he loved Fabian. It was the truth.. but Zander had fallen for Hark first without the stress of the games and the feeling of dyeing. Maybe it had all just been the emotion feeling of thinking he was dyeing that made him want Fabian." I had feelings for him.. I wont lie to you Hark.. But I have had and still do have feelings for you longer and without the fear of the games.. "

For some reason, Hark couldn't come to terms with this. He needed to leave. He really did. He feels that if he doesn't he could get really mad and blow up at Zander, but he doesn't want to do that. Everything between them now, would never, ever, be the same. "Does he?" he asked. "He should. Does he know what he has done? What did you say back to him? Were you as mad at him as I am mad at you now? Or were you playing both sides?" he asked. Hark thought it was bullshit. Who ever this man was, wherever he was, is going to get a piece of Hark's mind one day, so be better be ready for it. What grown man, from the Capitol at that, sleeps with a boy that is half his own age? What kind of monster was he? This man, this escort, was a new kind of breed. He had created something that needed to be exterminated. Defeated. Killed. "Do you see that? That thing you're wearing? I gave that to you." he said. "It should mean more than anything he could have said to you. I can't believe that you would do this to me." he stated. "You have feelings for him. And me? You need to make up your mind. Who do you love more? Your expression of love for him compared to mine is living and I was just nonexistent after you left me in that room." he stated. He waited for a second. "Do you know that I sat in that room. And I cried. But not for me. Not because I was being selfish. I cried for you. I stayed in that Justice Building, until they made me come out." he said. "And I did it all for you." Hark's tears began flowing again. "When you.. When you figure out your feelings. Come speak to me." he stated. "Until then, I'd rather.. I'm.. I'd rather us go on a break." he said. Hark walked past Zander and on his way to the front door. He stared at it for a second. Then turned the knob slowly, opened the door, walked out. Then he closed it slowly behind him. Looking out at the sun, he exhaled, and exited the gates of the Victors' Village.

Zander just listend to Hark speak so sad and torn. Tears spewed out of the victors eyes as he realized the person he loved was heart broken. Before the games Zander a angel....innocent in the way he had never done anything besides kissing and innocent in not hurting anybody. He came back a murderer. He had killed to survive and come back to his home. To his family and friends and his love Hark and now that he had told him what happened with Fabian he wanted a break. Zander still would wait for him as long as it took. It was all so confusing for him to try telling and explaining. " Hark everything you've done for me has meant more then he could do....I was just...just" He managed to get out. Tears making rivers on his cheek as the typhoon of guilt and sadness hit him with a side of I still love you hurricane. As Hark walked past him Zander followed him to the front door." Fine take all the time...but you need to know." His voice went into a yell when Hark left the house and he was distracted for a moment by his sister asking what happened." Hark wants a break." He spoke sad and wanting to cry but he had to try getting this message across. Zander ran to catch up with Hark at the gates to the victors village. Reaching out his hand and grabbing Harks hands facing him and looking at him straight on." You need to know that your the only guy for me Hark Warner... the first guy I have ever kissed and the last guy I will ever kiss. If that means I have to wait to be with you then I will wait till I die. I just want you Hark." It was true Zander loved Hark without the emotions of the games and he couldn't be with Fabian even if he had had caring and confusing feelings for him. He had made his mind that he wanted to be with Hark. Forever and Always.

Hark didn't want to listen. He wanted to act. He pulled Zander close to him, and kissed him softly on his lips. Then he turned, and continued walking. Maybe he taught Zander what a real kiss felt like. One that had something behind it. One that had a reason. Love, passion, hope. Hope that Zander would make up his mind, and make it up soon. Because if he didn't, Hark would be moving on from them. Life is like a book. If you read it, you eventually come to the end. Zander's words may be true. But a person isn't defined only by the words of their mouth, but their actions that follow.