The webiste:
http://members.xoom.com/sailmoonSol/solitair3.html
CHAPTER SIX
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Moon Kingdom
********************************
Endymion couldn?t help but stare at the statue-like figure beneath the
balcony he was standing on. It was growing to the point of
infatuation - her felt like he hated her, yet there was something there
that he knew he couldn't help but be attracted to. Yes, she was more
than beautiful, but the powerful sadness that she unconsciously
emanated was a challenge to erase. None of the others had succeeded
to do it, making it even more tempting for him to try, with the
rewards of such a feat being the greatest prize he could think of. He
was more jealous than having hatred towards her, but he couldn't let
himself be jealous of his generals for the sake of this stranger.
Endymion watched as the woman lifted the champagne flute to her
mouth, the drink slipping between her lips. It was sweet torture to
watch her.
But the moment could only last for so long, as Endymion noticed the
powerful frame of Malachite stand against a pillar in the background.
Endymion knew he would not have to see for himself that Neflite
was watching her too, the three of them all focused on her.
Sometimes Jaedite would look to her as well, and it was only Zoicite
that remained apathetic to her flawless beauty.
Neflite approached Malachite as he watched the woman's figure on
the other side of the ballroom.
"Malachite - " he called to the senior general, but without a response.
He blocked Malachite's view of Solitaire. Malachite's gray eyes met
with his, yet Neflite tried to not be intimidated.
"What?!" Malachite asked annoyedly and angrily, trying to avert
Neflite's gaze, however persistence was written all over Neflite's
face, which Malachite respected and could not ignore.
"I know how you're feeling. " Neflite said sadly, knowing that he
was on a mission. He felt he had to prevent both Solitaire and
Malachite from getting hurt by eachother so that both of them could
have hope in their future.
Surprisingly, Malachite avoided hiding the subject from Neflite,
unlike in the past when his feelings would be known only to him.
"How could you possibly know what I feel?" he demanded angrily,
his anger not directed at Neflite, however, but towards the things that
he had no control over.
Neflite raised a brow to Malachite, who suddenly realized that
Neflite did infact know exactly how he felt. Malachite mumbled
something along the lines of an apology to Neflite.
"You have to understand that she's not doing this on purpose."
Neflite reminded Malachite, who continued to look over his shoulder
in search of Solitaire.
"Right now I don't understand anything." Malachite sadly replied. He
tried to be understanding of Neflite - he didn't know if Neflite still
loved Solitaire.
"Did she mention anything about the future?" Neflite asked.
"What? No. I don't know." Malachite frustatedly replied. His anger
began to mount again.
"I know she had to have said something along the lines of it; she
doesn't know that I know." Neflite replied.
"Know what? What are you talking about?" Malachite demanded.
Neflite realized Malachite was as clueless about Solitaire's situation
as he was about his own emotions. He must really not see why
Solitaire refused to be with him, that there was a driving force behind
her rudeness, behind her coldness. Then again, Malachite could not
foresee the future like he could, and he certainly had little talent in
dealing with people's emotions. "Think about it. Why was she named
Solitaire?"
Malachite stared at the other general. He had no clue what Neflite
was talking about, but he sensed Neflite was only trying to help him.
And strangely enough he found himself actually thinking about what
Neflite was suggesting. Why was she named Solitaire? He had never
even thought about it before. "I...I don't know. She never explained it
to me." Had he been more sensitive, he would have tried to sense the
pain in Neflite's words, but what had just happened with Solitaire
overwhelmed him to the point of selfish introspection. Neflite
understood, nevertheless - Malachite was is friend, and Solitaire he
was forced to love as a sister - his actions were all to prevent the both
of them from getting hurt, because he knew that neither of them were
capable of protecting themselves when it came to others.
"She never told me either, but I thought about it." Neflite replied.
Malachite failed to answer, as his thoughts centered around the
name. But when Neflite's voice broke his thoughts, they morphed
into a new one - why did Neflite leave Solitaire? Could it have been
Solitaire had left him, and all this time he had been angry at Neflite
for behaving so irresponsibly? Had she done the same thing to
Neflite that she had done to him. And now, they seemed as such
good friends. Is that what Solitaire meant that someday he would
understand? "Solitaire" he whispered, trying to find the connection
between the name and her actions, while Neflite watched his
expression change between varying degrees of comprehension.
Neflite knew that shouldn't try to press the issue any more. He was
convinced that no matter how angry or frustrated Malachite would
get, he wouldn't direct his feelings towards Solitaire. And he had to
try to make Malachite see why Solitaire was doing this while
keeping her secret. He didn't realize that Malachite was on the verge
of forgiving him for a crime that he indeed committed - it was infact
he who had refused to love Solitaire, but Malachite would not
understand the reasons why until several weeks later.
**********************************
20th Century Tokyo
*********************************
Darien listened to her, occasionally adding something to the
conversation. When she looked away from him - when he didn't see
her eyes, and only heard her voice, he was convinced she had finally
returned to him. It was only when he looked so deeply into her eyes
- something that he had done so often in the past, even though what
he saw what not always necessarily happiness - he noticed the
difference. It was an energy that he knew had never been there
before.
Solitaire could not look into his eyes for very long. It was as if Beryl
was turning her head away, for the fear that she might realize what
she was doing, and that she might not be able to follow through. Her
soul was aware of what she was doing - it was crying out to her body
to stop, but Beryl?s spell was too strong. The pain of being with
Darien again, but to be here to take him to Beryl, was unbearable and
only made the real Solitaire yearn harder to break free of the spell.
Darien's mind couldn't concentrate on her words. If he had heard
them, they might have seemed somewhat strange, but he was
oblivious. Her hands were on his chest unbuttoning his shirt, moving
past the fabric onto his skin. He closed his eyes, lost to the sensation
that he had been missing for so long. She was here, she was alive and
with him. He wanted to forget about everything else in the world,
past and future, and exist only in the here and now, with her. The
only thing that was wrong was that look in her eyes. He was about to
open his and take another look into hers, but already her lips were on
his, and he was lost to his emotions and sensations. He could almost
say he felt whole again.
********************
Rei wondered about what Serena had said earlier about her "going on
and on" about Darien. Is that what she had been doing? She had
almost even forgotten about ever "dating" him. Deep down she knew
he was only an excuse not only others, but also perhaps to herself.
She didn't want to admit, that somehow, for some really weird
reason, she felt herself liking Chad. He was the exact opposite of
what she had imagined for herself - uncontrolled, infantile,
uncoordinated and worst of all was that hair and that accent! He
lacked any sort of sophistication and charm - he was tactless,
mannerless, and yet she felt safe around him. Something emanated
from him that made her calm in his presence, like he would never
betray her, like he would always be there for her. Rei wondered
where this sudden need for trust and loyalty came from - Grandpa
had never even allowed her to date so no one had ever been there to
break her heart. Besides, she was way too busy anyway. Darien was
just an excuse that she still held strongly to dodge Serena's menacing
efforts to play matchmaker, especially that she had been able to
sense that there was something between her and Chad.
She wondered if she had ever even really liked Darien, or had she
just seen him as an object that she wanted in her possession.
Unconsciously Rei walked with Ami towards the apartments where
he lived. Suddenly a gust of wind blew through them.
"Did you feel that?" Rei asked, putting her hands together and
closing her eyes.
"Feel what?" Ami asked, perplexed, the rain still dripping off the
edges of the umbrella.
"I sense something evil here. It must be the Negaverse." Rei
continued, opening her eyes and looking toward the sky. She noticed
a strange silver haze coming from one of the apartments in Darien?s
building. "Look!" she shouted, pointing to the balcony.
"It must be. I'll call Sailor Moon." Ami replied, fishing the
communicator out of her purse. The two began to run towards the
entrance. "Serena - "
"What is it Ami? Is something wrong?" a surprisingly collected
Serena answered through the communicator.
"Yes. Its the Negaverse. Get here as fast as you can..." Ami replied,
continuing to giver Serena their location. as they moved up the
elevator. As they reached the corridor, Rei could make out a painful
yell that she knew was Darien's coming from the room across them.
*******************************
Nemesis
******************************
It had been two days since Diamond was gone. The palace seemed
all the more dark without him to Solitaire, but she knew he would be
back any minute now. Yet she felt restless, like something was
wrong. This was not at all an uncommon feeling for her, and she
decided to do what she had always done, which is seek comfort in
the presence of the black crystal.
She passed Sapphire in the corridor as she headed to the chamber
where the crystal was kept. She tried her best to ignore him; he
reminded her of the man in her dreams. Sapphire stared after her,
wondering what Diamond still saw in this woman. Her initial
kindness and warmth had faded - now she was not much different
from Emerald. But then Sapphire forgot why being "like Emerald"
was so bad to begin with.
Solitaire meanwhile found herself encased in the crystal's warmth.
She knew if she touched it she would feel even stronger, and more of
her dreams would become memories. She placed her palm on the
glowing dark mass.
"What are you doing?" an angry voice came from the doorway.
Solitaire didn't even bother to turn as she addressed the voice -
"Leave me, Wiseman! I want to be alone."
"Foolish woman! Don't you realize it? Every time you go near the
Dark Crystal you take away its energy. I knew all along you where
here to stop our plans!" Wiseman replied. He was telling the truth
about her draining the crystal's energy, but Solitaire had been
unaware that she was doing so.
"What are you talking about? This is my crystal anyway, and I'll do
with it what I want." Solitaire angrily replied. She hated Wiseman,
and she especially hated Wiseman telling her what to do. Sapphire
had meanwhile entered into the room.
"I won't let you keep Prince Diamond from succeeding. It was you
all along who drained away the crystal's energy so that it would not
be strong enough to use." Wiseman continued.
"I knew you where old, but now I realize you're also senile."
Solitaire replied. She had had enough of this. Energy began to flicker
at her hands and a powerful wind blew through the room.
Wiseman saw the energy coming from Solitaire, and decided that
this was the perfect opportunity to do away with her now that he had
Sapphire as his witness. "Selfish girl! I won't let you destroy it!"
Solitaire's eyes widened at the accusation. Although she had long
forgotten about restricting her actions and emotions like she had
always done, Wiseman's words were by far the harshest she had ever
heard. Meanwhile, Wiseman had already unleashed his own powers,
and Solitaire was too shocked by what he had said to try to save
herself. She could feel her body losing its strength, her energy
weakening as she felt herself collapse on the ground. There was no
silver crystal to protect her. Sapphire watched the scene
apathetically.
*******************
Solitaire knew she wasn't dead - she could hear voices coming down
the hall. One of them made her feel safe once again, even though she
knew it was too late.
"What do you mean she was sabotaging our plans? She was the one
who *gave* us her crystal. True, we took it at first without her
acknowledgement, but when I asked if she wanted it back, she said
no. What where you thinking? Wiseman, you better pray that nothing
happened to her, do you hear me?" Diamond ordered.
"Yes my Prince. I was only trying to defend you best interest while
you where gone." Wiseman replied
"I didn't tell you to do anything. Leave me. I?ll deal with you later."
Diamond replied. Wiseman told him that there had been a
misunderstanding earlier, and that he hadn't meant to hurt Solitaire,
who was now resting in Diamond's room. Diamond didn't infer the
severity of Solitaire's situation - that Solitaire was dying.
He opened the door to his chamber, and his heart nearly stopped
beating. She was lying on the bed, bruised and aching. He could see
she was hardly breathing.
"Solitaire!" he called to her, rushing to the bed and trying to hold her.
He only saw her wince in pain as he touched her. He didn't know
whether to be angry at Wiseman or to focus entirely on her. "Please,
Solitaire!"
Solitaire's eyes opened with the last bit of strength she had. He could
barely make out the words. "I'm sorry, Diamond. I didn't know."
"Shhhhhh." he replied consolingly, brushing his hand across her
forehead and trying to smile. He realized she was going to die, the
crescent moon was gone from her forehead, but there would be time
to be angry after she was gone. "Its alright. I know you didn't mean
any harm. You where the only one who ever loved me, Solitaire.
This is all my fault."
Solitaire smiled as she listened to his voice. There was nothing more
she could want than to be in his presence and listen to his voice. "I
hope you'll forgive me."
Diamond tried his best to hide his anger towards Wiseman. He
would have felt much better if he could punish Wiseman
accordingly, but he knew he needed Wiseman's help to carry out his
mission. Otherwise, Solitaire's sacrifice would have been
meaningless. To him, she would live on in the black crystal. "No, I
should be asking for your forgiveness. I should have never left you
alone."
"Diamond, I'm sorry..." Solitaire replied. Diamond knew he was too
late to do anything. "Let me come back to you when you're happy."
she begged him.
Diamond winced. He knew he couldn't lie to himself - he knew he
couldn't pretend that she was going to live. Tears began to from at
the corner of his eyes for the first time in his life. "I won't ever be
happy until you're with me again."
Solitaire tried to reply, but her words were silenced by the pain and
her eyes shut.
"I love you." Diamond said, closing his eyes and leaning to kiss
Solitaire. The pain washed away from her body as Diamond
transferred his energy to her. Sadly, that was all he could do for her
now. For a moment he felt her lips, but then when he opened his eyes
she was gone, only the wind blew with a silver shimmer. Diamond
could see the haze being carried by the wind out of the room. He
knew where it was going.
******************************
20th century Tokyo
******************************
The inner Solitaire was trying to put an end to this. And yet she
could feel herself doing what she was doing - holding him and he
holding her. Its what she had wanted for so long, and to resist the
temptation to give in to her emotions was a feat that she only could
be capable of, having practiced it all her life. Even so, she was
defenseless against Beryl, and she continued. A tear formed at the
edge of her eye, and she almost managed to whisper "Darien" before
her lips merged with his. She swore she would try to fight what
Beryl was making her do, but how could she when she herself had
wanted the same for so long? This was what she had been thinking
about every day since she 'died'. And knowing that regardless of
what would happen today, Solitaire now remembered Serena, who's
destiny was to love Darien, only making her want to be with Darien
right now even more. She stopped fighting Beryl for only a moment,
saying goodbye to Darien (one way or another) with one last kiss
that was truly hers, the last chance she would ever get.
Darien kissed Solitaire along her neck, but all she felt was the sting
in her fingertip as she cut it on a nearby piece of paper. She wouldn't
let herself lose her control and stop fighting Beryl - she regretted
even doing it just now, even if only a moment. Hadn't she learned
that she only made things worse when she succumbed to her
feelings? The pain in her finger was nothing to the pain she felt
inside when she held the wound to her mouth, letting some of the
green liquid flow between her lips. She knew what would happen
next, and yet she had no way to stop it.
Solitaire lifted Darien's face to hers, looking him straight in the eye.
All what she could see was the love emanating from his warm gaze.
Her soul was torn - she would remember that look forever as the way
he looked at her before she betrayed him. She would never be the
same again, even though she knew she was helpless against Beryl.
Beryl didn't let her look at him, knowing that Darien would realize
something was wrong. Kissing Darien, Solitaire pushed the liquid
down his throat, pulling away from him abruptly and smiling
wickedly. He was surprised for a moment, until his whole body felt
the pain of ingesting the evil that she had given him.
A silver shimmer surrounded the room a Solitaire transformed into
the black silken dress of the Negaverse. It was all part of the drama
she was forced to act out, but had no control over.
"Welcome to the Negaverse, Darien" she snickered as Darien fell
onto his knees because of the pain. It was a more complicated
process for Solitaire to transform Darien than Neflite had
transformed her - she had less evil in than Neflite, and she could
pass less evil to Darien. Therefore Darien fought back much longer,
and he was especially resistant. Had he been weaker, the process
would have gone smoothly, like it had done with Solitaire; his
resistance made it only the more painful for him.
He looked up at her as the energy flowed around him, and he finally
understood what the look in her eyes that he could not get over was.
"Why?!" he managed to utter as his sad and pain-filled eyes met her
satisfied gaze.
"It makes me happy. It makes me happy like you never could." She
replied coldly.
Suddenly the door flew open and Sailor Mars and Sailor Mercury
entered the apartment.
"Oh my God! Darien!" Rei yelled, her face changing from terror to
anger and determination. She looked away from him, noticing the
woman who was standing above him. She paused for a moment,
thinking the same thoughts as Ami
"She looks just like Sailor Moon!" Ami exclaimed horrified.
"Whoever she is, she's got to be part of the Negaverse." Rei quickly
added. They had no time to waste. "Mars Fire Attack!"; her attack
was launched, but Solitaire easily countered it with negative energy.
She didn't care anymore - she had already done the damage she
sought to avoid. She hated herself - she hoped the Sailor Scouts
would kill her. But Beryl refused to let her off so easy - now she had
to go against the scouts.
"Pathetic! You're no match for me, Rei. You never where." Solitaire
teased.
"What? How did you know my name?" Rei asked angrily. Ami
meanwhile tried to help Darien, but she could not stop the energy
that he was engulfed in. Slowly his eyes began to glaze over. Steps
were also coming from down the hall.
Solitaire smiled superiority at Rei, but her smile melted as she saw
the figure ahead of her. "Serena." she spat, her face full of contempt.
"That?s right! I'm Sailor M - whoa! You - you look just like me!
How did you know my name?" Sailor Moon asked surprised.
"Watch her, Sailor Moon, she's more than she appears to be!" Rei
warned, trying to help Ami figure out how to stop the energy that
trapped Darien.
"Darien!" Sailor Moon shouted, as she had turned to face Rei and
noticed him collapsed on the ground.
"Sailor Moon! You've got to heal him! We'll take care of this
Negatrash!" Ami said
"Right..." Sailor Moon replied weakly. She was still wondering about
Solitaire, but quickly she noted the pain in Darien's expression - a
twofold pain that was both physical and mental. She initiated her
healing attack while Mars and Mercury continued to try to weaken
Solitaire, but she blocked all of their attacks.
"Mercury Bubbles Splash!" The attack shrouded the room in its cold
and misty cloud
"Surging Silver Glare Shatter!" Solitaire shouted, her attack
smashing Mercury against a wall as the mist cleared out with the
wind she had initiated. "Don't give me trouble. Its not you I'm after."
"Sailor Mercury!" Rei shouted, her face turning crimson with anger.
Serena had meanwhile managed to heal Darien, and she rested his
body against the bed. He kept on repeating the phrase "why", but
Serena ignored him as she focused her attention back onto Solitaire.
"Sailor Mercury!" Sailor Moon exclaimed, as she flushed with anger.
But looking back at the opponent she could not move. She sensed
that there was something wrong - that the woman was not who she
appeared to be.
"You'll pay for that! In the name of the planet Mars! Mars fireball
Ignite!"
"Mercury Ice bubbles - Freeze!"
The attacks came repeatedly and over and over again, but Solitaire's
wind extinguished Mars' fires and Mercury's water with a smile. She
had always excelled in warfare, whether in combat or tactics. Like
Mars passion, which was indeed like fire, and Mercury's smooth and
flowing love, Solitaire had the emotions of the wind, which blew
away any feelings that she had. It was the great equalizer.
"Sailor Moon!" Rei angrily shouted as Serena continued to stand
dumbfounded watching Solitaire. Who could this woman be, who
looked so much like her? And why was she from the Negaverse?
Why was she attacking Darien? Serena struggled to understand, but
came up with no answer.
"Sailor Moon! What wrong with you!? Why are you standing there?"
Rei demanded, watched Serena's vacant expression as she stared at
Solitaire. "Use you tiara!"
"No." Serena replied solemnly, as Solitaire blocked another of
mercury's attacks.
"No?!!" Rei shouted. "Serena!"
?Rei - there's something in her - I can't explain it. Its like looking
into a mirror." Serena replied in a monotonous voice. "Moon Healing
- Activation!"
Rei had was meanwhile to angry at Serena to listen to her. She
initiated another Fire Attack.
Serena's energy headed towards Solitaire. There was nothing to do
that could block it, as it paralyzed her with its warmth. True, Serena
would have not been strong enough to free Solitaire, but the timing
of Mars' attack allowed the fireballs to penetrate her, knocking her
through the glass of the balcony door and against the cold concrete
of the balcony.
"No!" Darien yelled from bed, stretching an hand towards Solitaire.
He collected the strength to stand up, but collapsed by her by the
time he reached her.
Rei turned to Ami who had since recovered from Solitaire?s blast,
shocked. She didn't understand what possessed Serena and Darien to
act so strangely. Why where they protecting the enemy? Sailor Moon
stood watching the scene play out before her.
"Solitaire?!" Darien called pleadingly to her limp body.
"Darien?" a faint voice came through Solitaire's lips. Her eyes
opened partially, the single tear escaping their expanses. "I wish it
didn't have to be like this. I...I'm so sorry."
"No - its all my fault, its always been my fault. I should have never
left you." Darien replied, his sad eyes filled with pain as he
remembered the morning over a year ago. He refused to let Solitaire
die twice in his arms.
Solitaire smiled a motherly smile. "No, its not your fault. How could
you think it was your fault? Besides, it wasn't meant to be. I know
realize that - one day you will too." Solitaire sighed as it became
increasingly more cumbersome to breath.
Darien didn't want to hear her anymore. He wanted to return to the
pleasure and satisfaction of a few moments ago, before. Her words
sounded too much like something someone would say before they
die. What was she talking about? He now understood that she had
been under someone else's control, but her mere presence was
enough to make him yearn for more. Now he could see she was free
of that evil (he didn't realize that he shouldn't have known why, but
his being Tuxedo Mask allowed him understand things he otherwise
wouldn't, even though he didn't realize he was Tuxedo Mask) - he
wanted to be with her again. "Solitaire, please! You can't mean that!
I know you didn't mean what you said, about this making you happy-
"
"No, Darien. You're the only one who ever made me happy.
Everything...everything I said was a lie."
Her words comforted him, brushing away the frustration he had felt
for her betrayal. Darien noticed the blood coming from her back and
arms where the glass shards sliced into the skin. The blood was red.
"We have to get you to a doctor."
"I'm...alright." Solitaire replied. It was not the glass that was killing
her - it was Mars' attack, that penetrated her as it would nay ordinary
human while she had been under Serena's energy. She tried to smile,
but winced as she felt the aching in her body.
Sailor Moon continued to stare at Solitaire's face. Rei thought she
would vomit, watching Darien care for the other woman so tenderly.
She thought to herself, this HAD to explain so much. Ami
meanwhile took her computer out to scan Solitaire's body. She
looked at Serena, Serena looking back. Ami shook her head from
side to side.
Serena kneeled next to Solitaire. Solitaire smiled at her sister. All of
her memories from the Moon Kingdom had returned with Neflite's
work. "Promise me you'll take good care of him, Serena."
"Take good care of who? How do you know my name? Who are
you?" Serena asked.
Solitaire's face was confused for a moment. She wanted to say
something, but her lips only parted before her face was distorted with
pain. A few seconds later, however, her moment of clarity came and
all the pain washed away from her body. "Darien. Love him for me."
she breathed as her body relaxed. Her eyes closed and her head fell
to the side.
Serena was completely shocked.
"Solitaire! No!!" Darien shouted, as he tried to hold her closer.
Another silver shimmer began to engulf the room his arms
tightening over nothing. He cried into the air. Even Rei felt his pain.
Serena and Ami were crying, it sounded to passionate and sad. As he
inhaled again, he felt the silver air sooth his lungs and his throat. He
let out a muffled sob, "No", smashing his fist into the shattered glass
on the ground. Her rubbed his face with his hands, blood smearing
onto his cheek.
He glared at Rei, the blood on his face emphasizing his anger and
frustration "You - you did this to her!". Darien tried to stand up, but
could only stand holding the rail. Rei stepped back, terrified. Serena
meanwhile stood, her eyes filled with tears. She didn't understand
why she was crying - it was not only because of Darien's pain, but
their was something deeper there, something from the past. She
looked at Darien for an explanation.
Darien turned to her, his chest heaving and his eyes filled with tears
an pain. Looking into her eyes he saw Solitaire - Solitaire innocence.
He couldn't explain it - her eyes were comforting amidst his pain. It
was like having Solitaire looking at him on one of those rare
occasions when pure innocence emanated from her eyes.
Serena too felt something when she looked t Darien. While Darien
was too preoccupied to notice Solitaire's using the scouts' real names,
Serena had understood well and wondered what this strange (and yet
familiar) woman was telling her when she said for e to love Darien.
Instinctively, Serena put her arms around Darien, who melted into
her embrace and cried into her, staining her uniform with blood.
How would she act the next time she saw Darien as Serena? Would
he remember what Solitaire said? "I'm sorry, Darien" she whispered,
comforting him.
Ami and Rei watched as the wind blew into the room through the
balcony. Rei wondered jealously why Darien was getting so
comfortable with Serena, and it had hurt her so much when he yelled
at her angrily. Ami was meanwhile trying hard to figure out how
Solitaire had known their names. She knew that this was not the
time to try and discuss it with everyone as she watched Darien
relaxing in Serena's embrace. Solitaire's attack wore him out terribly
- regardless of what he was feeling, he would soon collapse. Perhaps
he would think the whole thing was a dream.
**************************
Crystal Tokyo
**************************
It had been several years since Solitaire had driven, but she soon fell
back into the addictive pleasure of having control over the machine.
That beautiful car was in her hands - she decided how to take the
curves, how fast to go. She went fast. Somewhere under her
emotionless mask there was a passion that had been building for
several years. The consequences of releasing it could be invitingly
dangerous.
Solitaire had always liked driving Darien's car - it always took her
mind off how helpless she felt in her own life. But the familiarness
of the open road had little comfort for Solitaire now; the car had just
become another means of escape and repression. Slowly the light
trickled under the horizon of the city, showing off its crystal splendor
in all its beauty. Solitaire watched it from the top of the plateu over
the city. But her mind was obviously elsewhere.
So much had changed in these few moments. Solitaire learned that
everything she had thought about in her life had changed. Had the
war with Beryl truly been her fault? If only she hadn't kept that
crystal, perhaps her mother would have been able to repair it.
Nothing good had ever come from her keeping it - infact, Diamond
was going to use it to destroy earth. She had never been able to use it
for anything - other than as a shield both physically and mentally.
Having that crystal, especially after it was strengthened, made her
feel superior - not only was she beautiful, but she was intelligent and
now more powerful than any other woman.
Only now did Solitaire realize that her insecurity over her own
feelings had caused her to keep it for so long, thinking that it
somehow made up for the fact that she couldn't find love. She now
saw it was not that she would never be able to love because of
destiny - it was that she *couldn't* love - and she couldn't handle
being loved either. It had been so smothering to be with Darien in
20th century Tokyo - all he ever thought about was making her
happy - all she thought about was gaining control - over anything
that she could. All this time she thought she would never find love
because of her destiny, but now it was unclear how much of her
actions could be blamed on destiny alone. She realized she was
naive, if not even vain. Why did she do this to herself?
It had been so painful to keep that Silver Crystal - it always bonded
her to her mother and her family - and now solitaire realized not only
had it been pointless to do so, but infact she had ruined the lives of
so many others with her selfishness. What could she do now? Her
own feelings of loneliness and lovelessness where overshadowed by
the guilt of what she had done. Why did she have to keep that
resentment against Serena and Queen Serenity? Why did she try so
hard to distance herself from her family? If only she had returned
that Crystal...her mother and thousands of others would not have had
to die. Solitaire had to bear the weight of an entire war.
The car sped along the thin two-lane highway over the straight road.
Recklessly Solitaire sped through the lanes, her anger and frustration
mimicked by the car's quick and abrupt movements. Slowly she
calmed as her mind began to settle on her thoughts and organize
itself into solving her problems. The car slowed to a safe speed as the
wind danced violently through her hair. Normally Solitaire would be
devising some sort of plan for solving her issues, indeed with the
efficiency of wartime when she was posed with any problem. But
now there was just nothing she could do - Beryl died long ago, her
mother even longer than that. As for her own happiness, Solitaire felt
not only did she not know what love was, but she would never be
able know - there was nothing else out there for her; no duty or
honor to uphold. There was no course of action - already it was too
late. All her sadness and frustration condensed into a droplet in her
eye, for there was nowhere else for it to go. The road grew blurry,
and a sensation of pain pierced through Solitaire's eyes as the tear
slowly slipped onto her cheek, then it was carried into the air by the
wind. There was no one here to see her cry, and there was nothing
else she could do. She tried to fight the tears, but as usual her
emotions got the best of her (even if only for a moment) and she was
helpless. Slowly her throat loosed, and her body relaxed.
Solitaire remembered her time with Darien. It was a mix of pain and
pleasure to recall his love for her. Another tear slipped onto her
cheek, dried off by the wind that had always been a representation of
her masking her emotions. But wind was only a force that shifted hot
air into cold; and Solitaire could only shift her sadness from her
mind to a much more dangerous place - her heart. Wind had no
internal energy - it was what balanced the air scorched by the sun
with the one cooled by the water. It was nothing more than an
elegant and graceful movement.
Then there was Diamond. Solitaire thought how selfish she had been
with him. If she couldn't have Darien, she would have the next best
thing. Diamond was more lust than anything else - he was simply
someone there when she needed him. He didn't know any better - he
didn't know what love was, and he had nevertheless managed to truly
love her with the same devotion as Darien had. Solitaire didn't
realize, however, that her life on Nemesis had been influenced by the
evil force there, and, like with Darien, she might have succeeded to
have truly love Diamond if that force disappeared.
Each thought brought another tear, and with each tear Solitaire's
heart freed some of the pain that was inside it, until her memories
flew through her mind like the car sped across the road. It had been
easier to keep them locked away inside her - she refused to think
about things that she couldn't control, but there was nothing else she
could do now. There was no overwhelming duty for her - a duty and
honor that went above her personal feelings and prevent her from
letting them mature in her mind. The scouts had in a way all wished
that they did not have their duty and honor to abide by during the
Moon Kingdom. Solitaire flourished in it. It was an integral part of
her existence that masked her lack of emotions and her troubles.
Indeed, she had grown to be the authority on diplomatic and wartime
tactics - the energy that others devoted to their personal feelings
entirely focused on another goal for Solitaire. She wondered what
she thought about while she was growing up, for she was not always
so unusually cold and distant to her feelings. Solitaire couldn't
remember; only the constant feeling oh hopelessness dominated her
life, although she never allowed herself to dwell on its origins
extensively. She had grown increasingly less inclined to show her
feelings to others. And yet when she was with Darien in the past
these trends where not always the norm. With Diamond they had all
but disappeared. Was she too exhausted to try again? More
importantly, did she deserve a second chance?
But on Nemesis there was her duty to Diamond's cause that had
prevented her from focusing her attention entirely on herself. Only
when she was with Darien in Tokyo was there a complete absence of
responsibility. Solitaire wondered what might have happened if she
wouldn't have died, but she realized that her life on Earth and
Darien's was inevitably controlled by their ones on the moon. Darien
would have eventually fallen for Serena, one way or another. Just
like Neflite would have loved Lita, and Malachite Venus, Jaedite
Mars, and even Zoicite and Ami. But then again, what had controlled
their lives on the moon, if there was no such things as destiny? Why
did Serenity say she would never find love? It didn't matter really -
she didn't deserve love from anyone after what she had done.
The road drew increasingly closer to the edge of the cliff as Solitaire
took the quick curve. Solitaire stared at the sunset for a moment,
mesmerized by its beauty. Her eyes lost the road and focused on the
golden clouds and the sparkling city as her soul twisted in her
sadness. The car drifted partly into the other lane. For a moment she
almost thought she saw three suns - the water in her eyes had
blurred the headlights of the oncoming car, not to mention the glare
from the sun ahead had made it nearly invisible. Solitaire was
focused only on the rays of light as the thoughts in her head pooled
together into another wave of sadness, blocking out everything else
as another tear caressed her cheek.
What was that awful noise? It had started as brief bursts, but had
grown increasingly loud and steady. Solitaire did not slow down
until the other car was in plain view and it was already too late. She
slammed the breaks, twisting the steering wheel back to the right as
the wheels smashed into the soft earth, spinning. Fortunately for her,
the car did not turn over as it finally stopped in the field. A minute
later Solitaire lifted her head from the wheel, tears flowing full-force
out of her eyes as her chest constricted. Her terror had helped to
unlock more of what was inside her, as her sadness moved freely
around in her mind. She could not try to suppress these feelings
anymore.
"Dammit lady! Why don't you watch where you're going!" A voice
came from behind her.
Solitaire turned, noticing the other car smashed against the railing of
the road. She felt she couldn't care less. Suddenly it occurred to her,
however, that she had almost managed to kill another person, adding
it to the thousands of lives she felt responsible for.
"What do you think you're doing?" the man asked angrily as he
approached her. She looked up at him apathetically, until his face
reminded her of something from her past. Its anger and frustration
forced Solitaire to say something, even though she wanted to forget
her mistake and be alone.
"What?" she whispered.
The man's voice softened as he saw the sadness and pain in her that
he had never seen before. Or had he? He had begun to say something
before he was struck with Solitaire's beauty and pain. He had begun
to angrily say "How the hell am I ever going to make it to the
palace?", but his words trailed off into a mumble once he realized the
woman's unparalleled perfection as well as her tears.
Solitaire couldn't think as her sadness paralyzed her. She had never
allowed it to get the best of her and take control over her functioning,
but at this point she could no longer control her emotions and she
didn't care. "...Oh...sorry...take this car..." Solitaire said as she
stepped out of the car while the engine was running. The car slowly
rolled forward as the man stared at her in awe, both of her
physicality and of the trance-like way she was acting.
Solitaire did not even look back as she began to walk towards the
sunset. The man watched her as he pulled a cellphone -like
communicator out of his jacket. He figured he could call Serenity
and still have time to catch up with the woman walking away.
"Serenity?" he asked questioningly as someone answered the call -
"Yes? Fayate? Is that you? Is everything alright?" Serenity answered,
sensing the anxiety in the man's voice.
"Yes, its me. I'm sorry, but I'm going to be rather late. I ran into a
little road trouble."
"Oh! Are you alright - do you need any help?" Serenity asked with
her usual warmth and caring.
"Well, actually I don't know. This woman nearly ran me off the road,
and while I'm fine my car is basically totaled. I don't know what to
make of it - she see seems very disoriented, although she got up out
of her car and walked away."
"Do you want me to get an ambulance?" Serenity asked.
"I...I don't know. I went over to talk to her, and she was leaning over
the wheel. When she finally heard me, she looked at me and she was
so sad - and then she told me to take her car. I don't think a person
would just give someone else their new BMW if you know what I
mean."
Serenity paused for a moment.
"Hello?" Fayate asked.
"What did she look like?" Serenity worriedly asked.
"Well, actually, she looked ... a lot like you, except for the blue hair."
he replied. Now that Fayate was not so disturbed by the sadness in
Solitaire's expression, he analyzed her face more carefully.
"Oh my God! Solitaire!" Serenity exclaimed.
"Solitaire?" Fayate questioned. He thought he had never heard the
name before.
"Fayate, please would you try to bring her here? Don't worry - take
the car."
"...Sure..." Fayate weakly replied. Things were getting more unusual.
"But do you mind my asking who she is?"
"I'll explain everything later. Just make sure she comes with you.
Please, Fayate" Serenity implored.
"Sure" Fayate replied, but the connection broke. He was already
heading for the car, which had rolled a few meters in the field. He
caught up with it, getting in and turning it around to the road. He
could see the woman standing at the railing at the edge of the cliff,
looking into the sunlight.
****************************
Moon Kingdom
****************************
The war was escalating once again as the generals practiced
swordsmanship in the garden. Tension was written over everyone's
faces - they all fought as if they were in battle. Malachite felt a war
would be unavoidable - they HAD to protect Beryl, even if no one
really liked her. It was their duty.
Neflite struck Malachite with is sword, but the senior general
blocked him, accidentally cutting Neflite's hand as he pulled his
sword back and then finished the duel with the winning move.
Neflite bowed. He didn't feel the pain - he was to tense. They were
all too tense.
Except Endymion, of course. Nothing really ever got to him, but to
his credit the other generals had little faith in him as a leader, being
his elders. Malachite often did not even acknowledge Endymion's
efforts, so Endymion stopped trying. He couldn't be persuaded to
care much about the war - all he felt was his hatred of Beryl. He was
ashamed for once hoping that she would be killed in her battle.
Solitaire tried to concentrate on what Jadeite was saying, but her
mind drifted away from his teachings. She knew soon she would
have to go back to the Moon. Infact, Serenity would probably make
an official invite to representatives from Earth. But her time here was
stolen - and she loved some parts, but hated others. Still, it was better
than being on the Moon, where there was nothing for her to do but
delegate the royal affairs and try to avoid Serena between the time
she spent cultivating her crystal. She loved the freedom here, away
from her mother - and she enjoyed learning swordmanship the most.
If there was no one to protect her, she would protect herself. Still the
power of the wind and the silver crystal was vastly beyond physical
combat, but one day she could be without either.
Nevertheless, Solitaire he had wanted to go home after the incident
with Malachite. She felt she had caused enough pain here, but now
Beryl had done what everyone had least expected her to do, and the
war had escalated. She HAD to be here - she had to help organize the
war effort. If she left, the people of Earth would see such an act as
the Moon's complete betrayal of them, but what was more important
would be the Mineral Kingdom's reaction. Solitaire did not want to
be responsible for re-kindling hostilities between the Moon Kingdom
and the Mineral Kingdom. She also hated always having to wait for
Beryl to make a move - once the Earth is mobilized, once again
everyone would be in anticipation of Beryl?s action. In a week or so
life here would be back to the bitter-sweet slow pace it had been
before, when she was with Malachite.
Solitaire's thoughts always managed to drift back to her mistakes,
even when she should have been thinking about other things. She
felt so stupid and irresponsible for allowing herself to like Neflite,
and she hadn't learned anything, seeing what happened with
Malachite. Indeed, their feelings were at stake, but deep down
solitaire knew that what irritated her the most was the lack of control
she exercised when she involved herself with them. Destiny had
handed down her fate to her, but Solitaire vowed to have control over
anything else that she could have in her life. There where just times,
not necessarily critical times, but nevertheless times, during which
for no explainable reason she felt so alone and hopeless.
Her sword fell to the ground violently. Solitaire looked up surprised
at Jaedite, especially when she noticed his frustrated countenance.
She hadn't been concentrating. Of course, almost anyone could beat
her in a duel (seeing as she had only begun to train, and other men
had been learning since a young age), but Solitaire's beauty was
adequately daunting to tip the scales in her favor. Except, when her
beauty when unnoticed. Jaedite frowned. Solitaire felt ashamed for
wasting his time - her life would probably never depend on these
skills, but his very well might. She felt a moment of weakness
coming on. She HAD to fight it - she couldn't let anyone see what
she was thinking or feeling.
**************************
"I'm sorry, Neflite." Malachite announced as the duel was over.
"I'm fine." Neflite responded, ignoring the wound.
"Oh - well, actually, I wanted to apologize for what I said to you
other evening. There was a misunderstanding."
Neflite smiled warmly. He was happy that Malachite had come to a
realization about Solitaire's situation, but infact Malachite was
apologizing for assuming that Neflite abandoned Solitaire, and not
otherwise. To Malachite, Solitaire had lost her dignity - she was a
selfish courtesan. This was the only explanation Malachite could
find, although it wasn't a good one because if Solitaire made
relationships on the basis of getting more power, she would have to
keep those relationships. Besides, she was already a princess. What
higher position could she hold than that? Fortunately for Solitaire,
Malachite was noble and would not propagate his opinion of her. Yet
he found himself expressing his frustration towards her when the
group discussed the war - he shot down her ideas consistently.
Solitaire interpreted this as her own uselessness, and made her even
sadder internally. The war had made everyone tense and vulnerable.
"Oh. I'm glad you finally realized the truth." Neflite added.
Malachite nodded guiltily. He hated himself for mistreating Neflite.
Neflite continued, "So are you going to be nice to her again? I mean,
you can't keep treating her like that."
Malachite was confused. He thought Neflite would have resentment
towards Solitaire, but he remembered that they were friends now. He
was still unsure. "After what she did to the both of us? I don't know
about you, but I hope I never have to have another experience like
that. I think she deserves what she's getting."
Neflite hadn't thought that Malachite had misinterpreted their talk.
How could someone be so intelligent otherwise, but be so stupid
when it came to others? Now Malachite was crushing Solitaire when
she tried to help them, and Neflite realized he had gone too far. He
had to tell Malachite the truth, so that both Malachite and Solitaire
would feel better. "Haven't you realized it yet, Malachite?"
Malachite awaited Neflite's explanation.
"She couldn't love me - she can't love you - because...of her destiny."
Neflite softly sighed. Malachite clearly needed elaboration. "I looked
at the stars - there's no one for her. Why do you think she always
seems so sad? Her only source of worth is her duty, and each time
you make it harder for her to find satisfaction in that, you're making
everything much worse. You've got to try to treat her better. I know
you're angry at frustrated, but think of what she has to go through.
You'll get over her and find someone else - but she probably never
will. Unless she tries to change herself, and therefore changes her
destiny."
Malachite couldn't say anything to that. he thought he had figured
everything out - but this explanation made more sense than his own.
"She told me one day I would understand." Malachite finally
realized.
"Do you?" Neflite questioned. He had to be sure Malachite wouldn't
misinterpret anything.
Malachite looked towards Solitaire who was talking with Jaedite.
She caught his gaze, but ignored him. He didn't say anything.
"Then you'll see why you can't tell her or anyone else what I just told
you."
"I don't believe it. Of course she'd tell this to you. What I don't
understand is why she keeps doing it." Malachite replied. His
patience was being tested - he didn't know anything about women.
Neflite was getting tired of taking care of two such people as
Solitaire and Malachite, who where both so blind as to be unable to
see such simple things as Neflite saw. "Why don't you ask her then,
if you don't believe me." Neflite replied with frustration.
"Don't you think I tried? She makes no sense - she talks in ideals.
One minute everything's fine, the next ..." Malachite continued, until
he noticed the frustration in Neflite's expression. "Why do you even
bother with her? Doesn't it make you angry that she used you?"
"If I'm not going to be nice to her, no one will. Someone has to be
there for her - she doesn't have anyone."
"She's the princess of the moon, for God's sake - she has everyone
running around her. She's spoiled and she's bored. I don't want to talk
to her - its like talking to a stone wall. I don't see why you put up
with her after what she did to you."
Finally Neflite told Malachite the truth: "She didn't *do* anything to
me. She was sad and vulnerable and I took advantage of her. When I
realized her destiny, I had to leave her. Otherwise I would end up
leaving her much later on when things would have been more
complicated. I didn't expect anyone to take up what I had left."
Malachite's eyes darkened to a stormy gray. If he couldn't love
Solitaire, then he'd have to hate her, but now it was clear that he
could do neither. "How did she expect me to understand if she never
told me anything about herself - about her destiny."
"She didn't want you to worry about her. She doesn't believe she has
any future."
"But you're suggesting she does - why does she continue to do this to
herself?"
"I...I don't know. If she wants something bad enough, she can change
destiny. All I'm asking is that you treat her better, regardless of what
you're feeling."
Malachite was still somewhat unconvinced. He was the type of
person to whom the reasons didn't matter, as long as the final
achievement was something he could understand. To him Solitaire
was too complex - there were too many complications with her. He
recalled his thoughts of a few months ago "It was bad enough that
Neflite had allowed himself to be distracted from his duty by
Solitaire, with the war coming, but now to leave her like this? Neflite
looked pathetic sitting across from him, sipping more white wine as
his blue eyes met Malachite's. He was furious that Neflite had been
so irresponsible to toy with Solitaire's emotions like he had done.
What could have possessed him to leave her - she was perfection
itself; beautiful, cool-minded and quick-thinking, loyal...? Now,
Malachite felt, he would have to pick up the pieces of the mess that
Neflite had made.". He never imagined that the roles would be
reversed, that he would be hurting Solitaire with his words and
Neflite would have to make peace between them. This was enough
of a reason for him to realize that he should treat her with respect.
Soon Malachite would see the others as well.
"I think I understand" Malachite replied. Without even thanking
Neflite, Malachite began to walk towards Jaedite and Solitaire. He
regretted what he had done - even though he did not yet fully
understand why Solitaire was so cold to him, he had become
something that he vowed not to be.
Jaedite saw the other general approaching as his words dwindled off.
Solitaire looked up at him, surprised that he had grown quiet so
suddenly. Then she noticed Malachite.
"I'm sorry Jaedite, may I please speak to Lady Solitaire for a
moment?" Malachite said with an uncharacteristic politeness that
took Jaedite by surprise, especially because Malachite was being
polite in Solitaire's presence.
Jaedite nodded, smiling to Solitaire and leaving Malachite with the
privacy he desired.
Solitaire did not look Malachite in the eye. Whatever he had to say,
she knew it had to do with what happened between them, and she
was determined to not show any emotion. Or perhaps he wanted to
torment her more. Either way, she wouldn't let herself be weak.
Malachite began; "I wanted to apologize..." but his words trailed off
again when she refused to face him. Malachite didn't know Solitaire
was doing this to avoid worsening the situation, rather, he sensed she
was being rude and cold to him. But he remembered how he had
treated her.
Solitaire wanted to end this as quickly as possible. "Fine." she
replied coldly. She didn't really care what he had to say - she
concentrated completely on keeping her resolve.
Malachite was shocked that she hadn't said anything else, but then
again, this was Solitaire. Her silence bothered him - it made him
embarrassed. But he knew things would not be right until he told her
the truth. "I now know what you meant that one day I would
understand."
Solitaire's pose was broken, as she did turn to face him. Had he
managed to figure it out so quickly? He had actually listened to what
she said, contrary to his consistent dismissal of her ideas over the
past days.
Malachite continued. "And I know what I did was wrong. I had no
right to treat you so, when you're here helping us."
"Thank you." Solitaire replied more kindly. Malachite sensed the
sadness in her voice, and saw it even more in her eyes. There where
feelings there after all. "But then you should see how none...none of
this was ever your fault."
Malachite didn't want to get into one of Solitaire's theoretical
discussions - he just wanted to apologize and try to make right on
what he had done wrong. If she could just be quiet for a moment and
not ruin what he was trying to do (he knew he would start arguing
with her if they talked about the past) - Malachite took Solitaire's
hand and pulled her into an embrace. She was quiet, and he felt her
kindness. But soon he realized this was a mistake - holding her
again, he realized he still loved her.
Pain was written over Solitaire's face, although Malachite couldn't
see it. Internally, she repeated over and over to herself how she HAD
to remain strong. She couldn't let herself fall victim to her emotions
again.
****************************
Crystal Tokyo
****************************
Fayate drove the car back onto the highway careful to make sure he
didn't startle the woman. She stood precariously at the edge of the
cliff, even with the metal rail that had saved Fayate from falling to
his death in his car. He turned off the engine as he pulled into the
shoulder, turning the warning-lights on. He watched Solitaire stare at
the evening sky. He had never seen anyone so sad in his life. What
was this woman's connection to Serenity?
Solitaire did not even notice him as he drew closer. Still, her mind
tried to do what it had always done, to find something more
important to dwell on then what was making her sad. But at this
point there was nothing to do. Just like she hadn't known that she
was taking away energy from the black crystal when she touched it,
Solitaire was too young at an age of seven to know what she had
done to the Silver Crystal. To her this made little difference, however
- the war was still her fault. She had managed to ruin the lives of
everyone on the moon. Another tear fell onto the rocks beneath her.
She realized her own helplessness, her mind ceasing its efforts to
produce some sort of plan of action and overflowing with
unharnessed passion. Nothing could be worse than what Solitaire had
to bear.
"Excuse me, Miss..." Fayate called to her softly. She ignored him
completely - she didn't even hear him.
Fayate didn't know what to make of the whole situation. Why did
Serenity have to ask him to deal with this stranger? But he couldn't
help thinking he would have had to talk to her anyway, even if no
one had asked him to - he had never seen anything like her before.
"Solitaire?" he called to her nervously, placing his hand on her arm.
Solitaire quickly turned to face him. She remembered for a moment
that she should be trying to hide her tears, but the familiarity of the
man drove those instincts away. Her voice spoke, but her mind only
comprehended halfway -
"How - how do you know my name?" she asked, the tears choking
her voice.
Fayate didn't want to see her sadness. He would have much rather
liked to marvel at her beauty alone. "I...I'm supposed to take you to
the palace" he replied brokenly as he soaked up the sight of her. She
did indeed look like Serenity, but much more powerful and
dominant. Like a statue. There was no innocence in those eyes.
"I can't go back. I can only look back. There is no future." Solitaire
replied eerily.
Fayate thought she must have had some argument with Serenity -
Serenity had been so worried in her maternal way. "I'm sure they'll
forgive you for whatever you did." he tried to reply kindly.
"Its too late. They're all dead. They can't forgive me - how could I
forgive myself." Solitaire cried. She brought her hands to her face.
wiping the tears down her cheeks.
Fayate didn't know what to make of what she was saying. "The
future is the one you make for yourself."
Solitaire looked at him angrily, but she was angry at herself. If only
she had figured it out sooner, instead of living her whole life with
destiny's iron fist. She could only cry now. "It doesn't matter. You
don't know what its like to be responsible for their deaths." Solitaire
replied. She wasn't exactly talking to Fayate - it was more like
arguing with herself.
Fayate tried to be patient, but there was so much he didn't
understand. "Who's dead?" he asked softly.
Solitaire's eyes widened in complete horror. "Everyone!" she
whispered, out of breath. "I...I should have died! It should have been
me - it was all my fault. Why didn't Serenity ever ask for the Silver
Crystal? I...I would have given it to her." Her voice was quiet and
calm, but her mind was in overdrive.
Fayate couldn't understand what Solitaire was talking about. He tried
to focus on only taking her back tot he palace, as Serenity had asked
him to.
Another tear of remorse fell. Instantly, light shone brightly from it as
it crystallized into the Silver Crystal. Solitaire looked at it as it
floated above her palm. Fayate was amazed.
She wanted to make right what was wrong. Solitaire couldn't bring
back the people from the past, but she could return her Silver Crystal
to the original. And she could die, like she thought she should have.
"Do you know Queen Serenity?" Solitaire implored Fayate, her eyes
full of submission and sadness.
"Yes - I do." Fayate tried to reply helpfully. Finally, the woman was
beginning to talk sense.
"Please make sure she gets this. She'll know what to do with it."
Solitaire asked, resting the crystal in Fayate's palm and closing his
hand around it. Fayate looked up at her suddenly.
"That - energy - Silver Crystal??!! But something is different about
it..." he asked. Solitaire was already walking away. "Wait - where are
you going?" he asked, grabbing her arm.
"I'm going to face fate." Solitaire replied dramatically. She was
beginning to initiate a plan - finally a plan that she could apply to the
situation and take her mind off the sadness! Soon it wouldn't have to
think of anything.
Fayate remembered his mission. "Wait - don't you want to give it to
her?" he asked, trying anything to get Solitaire to come with him.
"No; I don't want them to know. I don't want them to worry. Tell
Serenity I wanted to be alone for a while" Solitaire replied.
Fayate was desperate. "She asked me to take you back to the palace."
Solitaire stood quietly in reflection for a moment. The plan had
already succeeded to block her sadness. She was regaining her
control - she began to think again. The emotion was washing from
her face. She looked at Fayate's hand, which was still holding her
arm. Then she looked at Fayate.
"Please, Solitaire." he begged. His tone contrasted strongly with the
firm grip he held her with. Her eyes didn't intimidate him - he didn't
let go of her. He wouldn't draw back from her emotionless
countenance.
Solitaire was shocked. What was he doing? Why did he care? Why
didn't he buckle under her, like everyone else had. He was so strong
and adamant - even more than she had been. He reminded her of
herself, but without her sadness. He was so beautiful. Suddenly the
accident flashed before her. She remembered almost killing him,
which brought back her memories of the past. Instantly the plan was
forgotten - sadness returning to her as her face filled up with emotion
again. "I'm sorry" she whispered, tears rolling off her face. She
apologized to him - she apologized for her mistakes in the past.
Fayate was disturbed by her emotional instability. One minute she
was fine- the next she broke down into those dehabilitating tears. He
had to get her back to Serenity. "Please come with me, Solitaire.
You'll feel better once you get some rest."
"I've rested all my life. I did nothing - I watched and I hid." she
replied, crying. Fayate knew exactly what to say.
"You're going to run away from your problems - you're running
away from Serenity."
Solitaire looked up at him. He was so right. He said just what Darien
had said, yet he didn't even know her. But she felt that he did. "I'm
doing it to protect her."
"I think she's the one who wants to protect you. Why are you running
away?"
"What is there left for me, if I have no more duty?" Solitaire asked,
crying. She couldn't help it.
"Freedom." Fayate replied.
"No - there is no freedom. I abandoned my duty. I caused all their
deaths. I can't have that duty back - and I don't deserve to be free."
"But why run away?" Fayate asked.
"I...I don't know what else to do." Solitaire replied. How could he be
so right? Why was this man still here? Who was he? Without
understanding why, Solitaire moved closer to Fayate, her eyes
closing and shutting out the tears.
Fayate felt Solitaire's helplessness. He wanted to comfort her. He put
his arms around her, holding her next to him. Solitaire couldn't hold
anything back - she cried into his shoulder, letting herself be held.
She wanted to feel comforted - it was strange that she was finding
comfort in the embrace of a stranger.
Fayate felt himself feeling whole for some reason. He picked up
Solitaire and began walking towards the car. She was too distracted
in her crying to care. He thought how fragile she was, despite how
strong she had appeared earlier.
She thought for a moment about what she was doing - she was being
so inappropriate. But she felt too good in this stranger's arms to pull
away. She could feel her sadness, but he protected it from getting to
her. She had never shared her sadness with anyone before - she didn't
know she could feel so much better than when she kept it within
herself. His embrace had a opiate effect - it dulled her pain and
provided comfort She was beginning to feel drowsy. Instead of
hiding form him (and herself), she wanted to thank him for listening
to her.
"What is your name?" she whispered. She found herself hardly able
to stay awake. She didn't realized how exhausted the inset of
emotions had made her - her body had developed no tolerance to
such fervent passion. Without the Silver Crystal giving her its
strange energy, resting sounded like a good idea. She untransformed,
appearing in her usual attire.
It was unsettling for a moment to realize that Solitaire had
transformed. Could she be a Sailor Scout? She definitely didn't look
like - and she didn't act like one either. Fayate replied with is first
name, as he crossed infront of her car.
Solitaire was confused by the name. She felt she had heard it before,
although she knew she didn't know the man. "What does it mean?"
Solitaire breathed.
"Fate's Dark Shadow" Fayate replied as he placed her gently into the
seat of the BMW. He remembered he was still holding her crystal,
but she was already asleep. He placed the crystal into his shirt pocket
as he walked around the front of the car and turned on the engine.
As he drove towards the palace, Fayate wondered why the woman
had asked him what his name meant - could she that his name was so
unique and unfortunate? Jupiter, Mercury, Venus, and Mars where
all names of Greek origin, and the planets had been named as such
after these Greek characters. Even Serena and Endymion originated
from Greek names; Selenity was the Goddess of the moon, and
Endymion was a protector of the Earth. Then there where all the
names from the Mineral Kingdom - Neflite, Malachite, Zoicite,
Jaedite, Diamond, Sapphire (and Beryl, Emerald, Rubeus - even
Eudial, Zirconia, Mimet, Tellu), which were all minerals having
properties respective to their owners.
"Fayate" was infact a combination of names from these two
Kingdoms - a combination of Fate (a Greek concept) and Fayalite (a
dark-colored mineral). What this meant was that no one knew where
he had come from - as a young man during the Moon Kingdom, the
Earth and Mineral Kingdoms had fought over to which kingdom his
extraordinary power belonged to - his talent with technical planning
and diplomacy (which was the most sought-after trade in those
times) could very easily avoid conflicts and win wars. Some even
suggested that he had the power to read the enemy's mind. In an
attempt to cement his allegiance, Earth had given him the name of
Fate - for indeed, it seemed he had the ability to control fate. But
such talent, like Solitaire?s, had come at a price - Fayate, too, had
grown up much too fast. In his case, however, he had no one to trust
in but himself - he had no family. Consequently, his nature assumed
the openness and kindness necessary to survive alone in one's world
- unlike Solitaire, he could not afford to be cold and apathetic. He
was always popular, and deep down his lack of a home bothered him
less and less as he became closer to the people on Earth and the
Mineral Kingdom.
Beryl's parents had decided to name him Fayalite - in the tradition on
Mineral Kingdom nobility - a dark green mineral (also known as
peridot - the August birthstone) - the name would translate well form
the terran "Fate" and symbolized Fayate's deep brown hair and
brown eyes. Fayalite was a darker green mineral than nephrite,
malachite, jadeite, or zoisite and indeed Fayate did not share the light
hair and eyes as the other generals. Everyone could tell he was not
from the mineral kingdom, but this didn't bother Beryl's parents. No
one knew where he had come from, but eventually Beryl succeeded
in holding his loyalty as tensions rose between the Earth and Mineral
Kingdoms. Endymion had never bothered with Fayate much - he was
jealous of Fayate for many reasons, not only because of his tactical
abilities, but Fayate was infinitely more mature than Endymion, and
that, coupled with his stunning dark features and charm caused his
envy to be even more pronounced. He was almost happy to see
Beryl?s control of Fayate, calling his newfound devotion to Beryl
traitorous (even though the Mineral Kingdom and Earth where
allies), and giving him the nickname of Fate's Dark Shadow, having
learned the meaning of Fate's other name: Fayalite. Endymion was
right, nevertheless, in judging Fayate's departure from their cause as
that of a traitor - but he did not think that Beryl was to be held
accountable for using Fayate, who, like Malachite, Neflite, Zoicite,
and Jaedite had no control over their actions and helped Beryl defeat
the Earth and Moon. But Fayate was forced to stay with Beryl when
the other generals where reincarnated on Earth, only regaining his
freedom once Beryl was dead.
He was able to enjoy less than two years as a normal human, before
the Great Sleep overtook the Earth. Even then, however, it was clear
to those that knew him that he was not normal; his intelligence
outshined the other students in his school, but unlike Ami he was
never seen studying, even with the rigor of Japanese education.
Consequently, one would think he had many enemies, but he was so
likeable no one could hold anything against him. Fayate made an
even stronger effort to be open and kind to others than he had on the
moon, for he was aware of what he had done as Beryl's minion and it
bothered him deeply. Like the other generals he worked to overcome
his past, but it was much more difficult for Fayate because he never
understood what had caused him to become evil - he couldn't get
himself to think that he had been evil all along. He would have to
hide the truth from others (and perhaps from himself), and
consequently he had difficulty keeping friends because it was so
daunting to look into his deep eyes. Each shade of brown symbolized
parts of his complex experience - his eyes were dominated by his
mysterious intelligence, but warm rusts radiated through the cooler
browns like Fayate's kindness overshadowed his wisdom. The pupil
was so black, however, it pierced into the souls of its observer - there
was a deep sadness there; sadness that had come from his loneliness
and his time with Beryl. Everyone liked him, and yet he was so
alone. This caused him to try even harder, but others sensed there
was something different about him always - something that separated
Fayate from them. The slightest hints of green and gold suggested
his great potential for love - a potential that was never tapped by the
shy and weak schoolgirls whose innocence was a slap in the face to
Fayate's past. Had they had the courage to get to know him and
unlock the secrets he kept, they would have realized the sadness in
his eyes would be replaced by the glow of satisfaction.
After the Great Sleep Fayate got the chance to reconcile with
Endymion. Now, after much forgiving and forgetting from both him
and Earth, he was part of Serenity's court here in crystal Tokyo.
Fayate wondered if Solitaire could sense his past. It bothered him to
think about it, because it reminded him that he never knew where he
came from. No one ever talked about it here in Crystal Tokyo - it
was another sad after-effect of Beryl's rule. Fayate had gotten over
abandoning Earth - Serenity suggested that he change his name, but
he said he had nothing to hide and kept his original name. It was one
of the few things he could hold on to as his. Only Pluto's origin's
where as mysterious as his - her name was Greek, but her power was
the Garnet orb, and garnet is a mineral. Similarly, her powers
revolved around death and time, like Fayate and Fate (even though
he didn't actually have control over fate). Fayate had wondered if
Pluto was his sister somewhere, but had decided against it. She had
a home - her planet. All Fayate could remember as a child was where
he was not born - the Earth or Mineral Kingdoms. But now it didn't
really bother him - the moment he met Serenity, he felt like he had a
family. Endymion's jealousy flared once again - he had made it
painstakingly clear that Serenity was his, but Fayate's intentions had
never been otherwise. Serenity was too simple and pure for him. He
felt like they had little in common, even though Fayate respected
Serenity and loved her sisterly.
Perhaps this woman could be Serenity's sister Fayate wondered.
They looked very similar, although Solitaire was unlike anyone he
had ever seen. Serenity's gestures and voice all radiated warmth and
love - this woman's only defining characteristic was her sadness.
That, and her beauty. But unlike Fayate, whose exterior mimicked
Solitaire's in its perfection, Solitaire would never seem warm - her
eyes were filled with pain. Such a combination could be nothing
other than beautiful, as blue eyes usually where. Then again, he
hadn't studied them enough. He'd have to study them more...but now
he could only admire the rest of her as she slept.