January 3, 2009

to all smokers2 out there try isap rokok n drinks sumthing yg ada caffeine.please try..aku dah stat addicted dah..caffeine with tar n nicotine its really not a great combination..its killing all our brain cell, i guess..i sucks in science.so, i just made out my own conclusion n i think, i stress out I THINK its killing me slowly n softly..die n smile.wow, tahts not to bad.not at all..like a i previously, if we gonna go to hell, might as well enjoy the ride..if we wanna die, might wanna do sumthing that worth killing urself for.if we gonna go down, better go down swinging not surrendering..call me crazy, i dun care. cuz im gonna still do it.because again, its a wrong thing to do in the first place.i shouldnt try it..well, since i started theres no going bax.its one bullet train away straight to nirvana.well, if its exist..so my attemption its not for me n just me, its for everybody sake as well.so, enjoy the ride guys.

p/s-if none of the above make sense, well its not what it seem to be..actually, my not writing to tell a tale bout smoking n caffeine..theres another story there..sorry, another metaphor.whats its really bout, go figure! ops! chow! rox in, peace out!

who are we kidding? bluffing around.. believingg on sumthing that surely is just another illusion of tricky mind that contruct ourself to this massive mess.trying to fix the world that clearly can be save, destruction created by the people who sworn gonna save them from extinction.and still, as brilliant creation as we are that we'll alway claim to be, still dumb enough to believe in every damn word they throw out of their ass-licking mouth.sometimes, is confused me, whos dumber? we or them? maybe us cuz at least their r doing sumthing bout anything not like just, just nogging our head n swallow everything.till when this drama gonna keep winning oscar? till when this blockbuster movie gonna steal the magic hour? some of us, realize whats going on but, money blinds them.ya, the new religion for human..money..thats what people believe in nowadays, trustee, will-to-die-for possessive items..of cos, money make the world go round.but we didnt realize that is been sinning our world faster then before.nothing more that we can do actually..is to late already..we r all going to hell.hell on earth..it just been picture perfect so that no one freak out n start praying n believe.well for some that already realizing, its a lost cause.we lost it..everything..well, but thats doesnt mean we should give up.if we all are goin to hell, might as well enjoy the ride

ya, again..another love addiction some might say..but seriesly i guess not..its not an addiction..shes ruin my life..in a positive way of cos.. i cant eve laugh while watching My Name Is Earl cuz in my mind there only her images.everything that i could possibly remmber bout her last nite, all stuck in my mind n it wont come out easilt..maybe its cuz i dun want it to go away.. maybe i want to remember her..i dun wanna forget her.seriesly..

story began, last nite after i cancel my PAD(code pa ntah) class cuz lec didnt come..me n my boys went out to fill in our stomach with something delicious..otw the kenyangkan perut trip something happened in front of the laiberi..as we walked to the laiberi theres a bunch of girl waited there.waithed for somebody i guess.as we pass by them, 4 or 5 of them there she is..in a white sweater, cute, kinda gudv looking, free hair, skinny jean..thats all i can remember bout her.what shes id next change my life for the moment n afterword until now.. she gave asmile.ifreak out...i dunno why.. i look behind me to make sure that shes smiling directly to me, not anyone else..there no one behind me..so shes definitely smiling at me.. abig long stoodstill smile..hiow long? well its pretty long i guess. cmon let face it..how long do a person take to raise a smile..she smiled for bput 5 or 6 second..that really long..as freaked out, i still acted cool.i smil back at her..thats it..one big msitake taht i've donw last nite..at least i should say HYE or something..or even wave my hand.. but i just smile bax..fuck it adam, u suck!that incident haunted me..seriesly..(ble guna ke word haunted ni?)..but still, i cant realy figured why did she smile at me? is it bout the way i look? cuz i look like chines dude? or maybe its cuz my appearance.. or maybe cuz my t-shirt..graffic t-shirt which have a writing "we are not schoolmates, we are not war buddy, we are colourful"..maybe taht the reason.or maybe she noe me before..i dunno..i wish i knoe.i hope i cna still meet her face to face again, n this time im gonna make it rite..im gonna make a move.butlet face it, UiTM Kedah is without a doubt is a small campus but how often u cross by a complete stranger which u can remember twice a day? or eben a week? or even a month? maybe i'll never see her again after this. i dunno.lets just hope that i get asecond chance okay.. i really need it..ok, that all..im out..CHOW!!!

December 30, 2008

lil' sis..im proud of u..7A's n 1B..thats damn good babe..(orait r b sejarah dah dia menci sejarah)..one thing for sure, shes still gonna be in that prestige skool(skolah men sains tun syed sheik shahabudin..tol ke aku eja ni..ranking no 23 dlm skolah men mesia), not as shes expected, well she thought that shes gonna get an ass kick from that skool..shes even prepared herself mental n physical to fit in to normal skool(skolah harian r..)..sorry babe, trust me, u wont fit in..u too good to be in normal skool..one more thing, sejarah B? thats cool..just try to keep up cuz in form 4 there essay that u have to write in history subject.. n choose the rite stream okay..shes wanna choose accounting n bio stream..well, shes said she love math but hate bio, but they cant be seperated.so, do what ur big bro did..juts study to get pas.. which i did ok..i get 8E for bio..hahaha..accounting? good.. after this u can teach me accounting cuz im sucks in this fucking subject..haha(kalau la dia taw aku fail account kat U conpem dia xmau ambik accounting pny, u noe why cuz she look up high for me..in her mine, his big bro is some genius boy that have xtraordinary mind..ooh lil sis..u dunno how untrue that is)..well u beat me again on PMR..well i only got 7B n 1C for PMR..well i totally deserved that..n im proud of her..shes can do much better than me in academic.i admit that..im just somehow got lucky all the time.she n my big sis is the brain of the outfit..im just the mastermind of problems..haha..well Hajar i hope u read this entry(i noe u wont) so that u noe that im very proud of u..n i love u soo much..sometimes i just dunno how to express it..really..seriesly..but shes still love me more than big sis..i just dunno why..maybe its cuz that im the only bro she have n no matter how screw up i am, im just the one to turn in..n remember, no matter what, no matter what stream u choose, i'll alway support u..our family alway support u..dun worry.the pressure is not n u..u r the youngest..its not u that leads the way..big sis carry that respo..im next..u r the last..well, i really am glad that mummy drop the pressure of pursuiting u on medic(eventhough she didnt noe that shes applying the pressure on u, but i noe..), n now ur choice is wide open..just be anybody that u want..(well to be honest i still hope that u'll someday be a newscaster.so that everynite i turn on the TV on 8 n i ca proudly say that-that babe on Tv is my lil sis!..haha)..well thats all i wanna say to u, my lil sis..love u so much..now i just need to accept that u are no longer our baby gurl..u have grown up..all of us need to..u can be indie u just need to believe in urself more as much as we believe in u..n remember, i'll have ur back..im gonna take ur hand everytime u fall, im gonna shield up the bullet for u if i have to..cuz no matter what, u still r baby gurl in my heart..u r the reason i wont do any bad things in life cuz i dun want anybody hurt u..n im sorry if im being to tough on u..im just trying to build up ur confident on urself..thats all..

p/s-sumthing bout my lil sis-shes fragile.not confident in herself as much as all of us trust her..vunerable sometimes..soft hearted-really2 soft..softer than a feather..easily influece(this one is my own conclusion.)..not so indie as me n my big sis.so, as a big bro i have to take care of her..the respo lies on my shoulder.i really have to

one more thing, since im now in my beloved campus, i think im ready.. ready to be hurt again.ready to fall in love again..but this time, im gonna make it rite.. no more foreplay..im not gonna hook up with any gurl that just come by..im gonna search for Miss Right this time..if i dun find her, will stay single ja la..pa susah..bkn aku xble idup kalau xdak gurlfren..btw, i msg nabilah sblom bertolak td ckp kat dia yg aku nk blah dia mai cni, i ckp gudlux n bye2..i told u, were good.. no heart feeling..we still can be frens..we used to be gud frens..nothing gonna change that.. the chemistry we share, gonna make us pull it through though..just wait n see.im not bluffing..

well its kinda sad tahts im gonna leave penang tommorow(teruk2 nk blk kedah ja pun..kn jauh mana..setgh jam je dah sampai)..so i guess this gonna be the last entry i wrote from penang(for now)..so a month n half past by while im hanging in penang on my sem break, what had happen?

I Got A Job at Kareoke Site

i Quit Kareoke job

i Got my old job back-Swenz Kopitiam

I broke up wif Nabilah

Im Single again..pewit!!!

i make a nu frens in blogs

i make nu frens in real life

i'd scandal with amoi Myanmar

i lost 3 kg

i gain 4 kg..wow!!!!

i fall in love but i ignore it..because its just another addiction

someone fall for me n i ignore it..im an idiot

i reconnect with my old buddies

i hanged a lot

i eat a lot

i sleep less

i smoked less

well thats all i guess..except for something that i rather not write bout it..well evnthough its kinda short sem break (at least thats how i felt) but a lot of things happened..so, yeah i love penang no matter what..i love seberang jaya precisely..no doubt bout that.u can say what ever u want dudes but penang its the best place in teh world..no matter where i go this is my home n this is where i will come home to..theres no place like home, man..

so gudbye for now..one thing for sure, my next entry wont be from seberang jaya, penang anymore.its gonna be from merbok, kedah..i love that place too..chow!