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Creating your guest list is no different from many other projects as you will start with a monumental idea only to realize the need for a more practical outcome. Whether you are planning a small, intimate ceremony or one to which you invite hundreds, there are some that should NEVER be included and others whom there is no obligation to extend an invitation to. Here are just a few of those….

Certainly, there are people you see often and seemingly know every detail of your life, whether your manicurist, co-worker, boss etc. Therefore, you have had conversations about your upcoming marriage and perhaps each aspect of the planning process. However, neither that knowledge nor the amount of time spent together necessitate an invite.

There is no need to include all members of your family as, most likely, you have relatives with whom you don’t keep in contact with unless via holiday cards or see every few years if you happen to pass through their town or attend a family reunion. A great way to include them in your celebration (while alleviating feelings of guilt) is to send them an announcement along with a photo and personalized note.

It goes without saying that you exes belong in the “should NEVER be invited” category even if you have been apart for years and remain friends. Perhaps he/they has moved on as well but there is no assurance that seemingly long gone emotions won’t be stirred up. However, you can likely guarantee that his/their attendance would create an uncomfortable situation for your fiancé.

Plus ones are often expected to be included as some feel more comfortable attending an event which is a celebration of love, happiness and unity with their significant other rather than going alone. Of course, you should encourage your close family and friends to bring a guest. However, if you are not including certain relatives or others with whom you spend much of your time, there is no requirement to surround yourself with people you have never met.

Friends from high school with whom you only exchange occasional hellos with on social media, neighbors and friends of friends also fall into the “should NEVER be invited” category as you would not expect them to attend, mind if they didn’t or notice if they did. Also, it may seem as if their inclusion is merely an attempt to get more gifts as many do feel obliged to respond to an invitation in such a manner.

Chances are that you have heard all about weddings that you were not invited to and probably didn’t even give a second of thought to it. It is your day to be surrounded by those who mean the most to you. Including many who are either strangers or acquaintances casts a shadow over the value of ones you hold nearest and dearest.

Likely, your initial thought when choosing who to celebrate your marriage with is to include everyone who has ever meant anything to you in your life. Then reality sets in, you realize your fiancé has a guest list as well and that, as the number goes up, so do your expenses, forcing you to reallocate your budget.

There are many reasons for selecting a venue among those being a place with sentimental value, somewhere you just happened upon and had a feeling about or a location which may not be your first choice but will accommodate the numbers of guests you have invited.

While every person you do invite most likely hopes to attend, not everyone will be able to. Some may immediately let you know via your RSVP cards but others cannot predict unforeseen circumstances and cannot inform you until much closer to the date.

One thing to consider is the number of guests coming from out-of-town. If they are family or very close to you, the likeliness of attendance is much higher than if they are friends from college for example. Typically, when averaging the two, approximately 55% of those coming from different locations will actually be present.

Local invitees are much more prone to commemorate your day with you so expect relatively 90% of those to attend. However, something may occur which keeps them from attending as well.

Therefore, your site should be chosen not by the capacity it is able to accommodate according to the number of invitations you send out (given it is not significantly less) but rather by what feels right and seems to be the ideal location. After all, if your heart is set on one particular place, modifications can always be made so as to execute what you’ve dreamed of.