In defense of goats …

So every once in a while the heavens part and down comes a PR person — a PR person who actually reads The Poop instead of simply including us on some mass market mailing list that begins with something like, “Dear Michael Peter, have you ever had that unfresh feeling?”

I admit they DO look cute. But they also look kind of hungry — hungry for human fingers.

While this might be right up Peter’s alley, I admit it drives me crazy.

But every once in a while — once a year, I think, if even that — we get something that is wholly charming and wonderful and just … perfect.

But I was so taken by the delightful acknowledgment of the fear I wrote about earlier along with the casual defense of these apparently “wonderful” animals that I admit to thinking twice. That’s how good the pitch was.

Take a look:

“I have a secret confession — I used to be kind of freaked out by goats too. I think it started when I found my older brother’s Rolling Stone album cover for Goats Head Soup and continued with every petting zoo visit. But over the years, I’ve come to love these animals and all they do to help humans and our planet. Some say that facing our fears is the best way to overcome them and there’s never been a better chance to get your goat on than this Saturday at the first-ever GOAT FESTIVAL where you can sample goodies made from goat’s milk, meet adorable baby goats from Redwood Hill Farm & Creamery (see GoatKids photo attached — much less scary than the goat photo you posted — although it did crack me up) and talk to the Goat Girls of Northern California who live and work with goats every day — Mary Keehn of Cypress Grove Chevre raised her 4 daughters and now her grandchildren on goat’s milk and goat’s cheese, and Laura Howard of Laloo’s Goat’s Milk Ice Cream is raising her 3 year old “kid” on it too. Together we can help you overcome your secret parenting fear of goats.”

Is that not just pitch perfect? You had me at ice cream, Kris. You had me at ice cream.

I was so enamored by the email that I just knew I had to spread the word right away.

So here you go, Kris: The Goat Festival is this Saturday the Ferry Building in San Francisco. It begins at 10 a.m. and features all manner of free goodies and apparently cute baby goats.

Unfortunately, we’re going to be out of town this weekend, otherwise I might have had to go stand a few blocks away from the Ferry Building and spy on the whole thing through binoculars. It was, after all, an incredible defense of goats … but these things take time. Maybe next year, Kris. Until then, thanks for trying. And keep up the good fight. You face an uphill battle in redeeming these horrible creatures in the eyes of humanity, but you’re on the right path.