Kendall Jenner's recent appearance in a Fausto Puglisi double-slit gown has heralded the emergence of a disturbing new trend: pubic cleavage. Or rather, "pevage" — which theNew York Daily News claims is the "increasingly accepted term" for the area.

"Like it or love it, you may be revealing your own pevage soon," says the publication, claiming that the pelvic area has supplanted both actual cleavage and sideboob as the red carpet's new 'it' private part. Thanks, but my pevage already gets exactly the right amount of attention, even in this pevage-concealing regime.

Speaking of: I appreciate a good portmanteau but "pevage" sounds like a disorder and "pelvic cleavage" is a misnomer. If the word "cleave" refers to a split, then "cleavage" is the hollow. You can't indiscriminately apply the term to any vaguely titillating expanse of skin. There has to be clefting, or it's not cleavage.