a Topeka tadpole involves first feeding your partner a pound of spinach and garbonzo beans and then having your partner drink laxitives. after about twenty minutes the laxitives should take effect and you sit face up on a car hood while your partner stands over you and expells their bowels onto your face. The barely digested meal will resemble tadpoles as it spills on your face.

Colin needs to lay of those topeka tadpole sessions because it cant be good for his prius.