Ahh, it was about time I offered you a picture of our good old Paris public transport system methinks.

This helpful sign gives us some useful tips on having a safe journey, such as not getting off the train when it's moving, ditto for when it's not at a station, and of course not getting on when the door-closing alarm is sounding.

The last one is a bit of a joke, as everyone jumps on and off at the very last second, often getting their bags or themselves trapped in the doors. And what's even funnier is that the driver amuses him or herself by not reopening them so that the munched person panics like mad while half the carriage desperately tries to extract them from their predicament. Ho ho.

The RER - the big suburban trains - are the only ones where I am officially allowed to take my dog, who's quite a big one, but he needs to have a muzzle on, according to the powers that be. The problem is he hates it and is far less calm with it on, desperately trying to remove it, than without, when he snoozes.

Yesterday a whole bunch of 'controllers' got on and I forced poor Dasco to suffer his muzzle for half an hour and the ticket inspectors never even arrived. Oh well. Maybe they got stuck in the doors. Now that would be funny...