"Fun Fact: the Porn Version Looks Almost Exactly the Same".

Happy Halloween, everybody! Last year we looked at a children's classic, and this year we're looking at one of the more successful thrillers of modern cinema.

"Paranormal Activity" revived several trends in horror flicks, most notably the hand-held "found footage" set-up popularized by "The Blair Witch Project". The first film especially was a modest effort. Two actors, the director, no camera crew, a WEEK of shooting and a miniscule budget resulted in what eventually became a blockbuster hit, spawning several sequels (including one that comes out this year). It's arguably one of the greatest success stories of independent cinema. Legend has it that while watching the premiere people walked out of the theatre, not because the film was bad but because audience members were so scared that they couldn't take it anymore.

We here at For Your Inebriation have already established that we're skeptical folks. We ain't afraid of no ghosts. So how did we react to this modern-day spookfest? Join us for the "Paranormal Activity" drinking game!

"Authority is Not Given to You to Deny the Return of the King!"

Fans love to joke about the plethora of endings in this film, how every loose end needs to be wrapped up. And yeah, if you're sitting in a theater for three hours it can feel a little annoying to be faked out again and again when all you want is to stretch your legs and relieve your bladder.

I feel like these endings are necessary. After the years devoted to these films, after feeling the passion they inspire, I can wait a little longer to see exactly how things play out for our heroes. After letting these films put me through the wringer, it's nice to see everyone get their happy ending.

When we began watching The Return of the King, Seb and I were largely unaware of how drunk we were. We were so caught up with the story that the booze didn't hit us until about twenty minutes after we finished. We record these things; the recording for this film is composed of equal parts us talking about dicks, quoting the film, proudly declaring that we're very sober thankyouverymuch, and crying. Hysterically crying. The journey ended, the ring was destroyed, there was no more evil in Middle Earth ever again, and we proceeded to fall asleep, content.

No hangover, I might add. So, aren't we the real heroes of this story?

"Who Dares Now to Stand Against the Union of the Two Towers?"

Here's where things start to get silly.

"The Two Towers" is a great action movie. You've got the battle of Helm's Deep, you've got the skirmish at Osgiliath, you've got the sacking of Isengard...in contrast to the "Fellowship", a lot of things are happening. But these big important things don't connect directly to the main plot, which is the journey to DESTROY the RING. The film suffers from splitting its time between Aragorn's quest with the Riders of Rohan, and Frodo and Sam's continuing march towards Mount Doom. The less that's said about Merry, Pippin and the Ents the better.

I still love "The Two Towers". Its only flaw is that it's not as good as the other two films. But Seb and I have seen this movie a lot, and after five beers each we were already paying less attention. So now I get to not only write about the films, I get to write about the GAME.