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Tuesday, April 29, 2014

We are born with certain innate tendencies to think and behave in a n individualistic manner.Sure we can and do modify our habits when they turn out to be counter productive but a little bit of lassitude or complacence,and we are back at our original selves.I guess that is why,while some cannot shake off their workaholic natures,others refuse to be hurried or worried no matter what the stakes.This divine truth stares me in the face these days.I am one of those who think it is a sin to be idle (as if I am holding up the sky on my puny hands).But this constant state of flux does take it's toll.

One day it suddenly struck me --why was I driving myself so hard?Especially because I did not add a dime to the family kitty.At that very moment I decided to just relax and enjoy life at a leisurely pace.My PC was the first casualty because the whole routine of reading and writing blog posts had become strenuous and time consuming.Much though I enjoyed this activity,I decided to shift focus to something less demanding which would allow me greater leisure time.So with a heavy heart and a determined clench of jaw I disconnected my PC and turned my attention to other activities like knitting,sewing and watching TV etc.Let me tell you,I just love to sew but with the whole focus today being on readymades,there is little I can do in that sphere.So i quietly took out a shirt my BH refused to wear and made it into an apron and two lace edged kerchiefs.Another one was embellished and transformed into a cushion cover.My hunger for sewing refused to satiate,so I added some fabric to a single bed cover to make it a medium sized one.Like this,I went on and on till I got rid of many unused garments stuffing the cupboards.What I did not need was given away.That done, I took stock of the store room;discarding what was not needed and finding new uses for old stuff.Old style teapots,milk jugs and sugar pots have now taken on the avatars of plant holders and flower vases.Making use of my new found free time I just had to indulge in a favorite activity of mine--changing the settings of rooms and shifting stuff from here and there to infuse some newness into my home.On top of all this I was saddled with the onerous task of preserving a load of tomatoes from my kitchen garden.And now,there are two brand new books by Amish Tripathi waiting to be read.Over and above all this is the demon of Sudoku hovering over my head to monopolise my attention as soon as I hit the bed--how I love this past time.My craze for it has multiplied manifold.Phew!So much to do and so little time.Relaxing?Who said anything about that?But since this is the title of this post,let me recommend a good site for it.Here it is http://www.wikihow.com/Relax.Relax and rejuvenate!

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Life would be sheer bliss if there were no worries to weigh us down.But this is neither possible nor desirable because worries warn us of looming dangers,stimulate action and aid problem solving.But if carried to the extreme,this habit can result in insomnia,fears,debility,inaction,panic and nervous breakdowns.Those who have a proclivity for excessive thinking,imagination,perfection or lack confidence in their abilities can end up as habitual worriers.Most of them know that this habit is injurious and unrealistic but there are also some who believe it protects them from dangers.If you wish to be rid of it you should first convince yourself that it is unproductive and you shall be better off without it.

Whenever you catch yourself worrying about something,consider the following posers:--*If you are worrying about something which happened in the past--can you redo the it by worrying yourself to bits?

*Is the problem real or imaginary--stemming from your fears or past experiences?"My life has been full of terrible misfortunes,most of which never happened"Michel de Montaigne.

*Does it's severity match the quantum of your worry?You are not catastrophizing,are you?*A small event breeds a slew of dire consequences--are you not making irrational,unrealistic predictions?

*If this matter is not relevant to your life today why not avoid it?

*If it is in your interest to fight the problem, do you think worrying about it will do the trick?*Does worrying about an imminent difficulty armor you or deplete your fighting spirit?*There are problems which can be solved with positive thinking and determination;but there are also some--like natural disasters or accidents--which cannot be predicted.These have to be tackled when we come face-to-face with them.No amount of worry can protect us from them.*Coming to problems which can be solved--why not spin your anxieties into an action plan to be rid of the nuisance?"You can't wring your hands and roll up your sleeves at the same time"Pat Schroeder.*Do you have the requisite caliber and resources to tackle your problem?*If not,then find out the most suitable agency which can help you out, instead of just worrying about it.*If yes, then lay down the various steps you should take to solve your problem.Take them up one by one.*If the worse comes to worst,a rush of adrenalin empowers us to fight the danger.Don't minimize your ability and maximize the difficulty.I am sure many worriers must often have posed these questions to themselves many a times but failed to shake off this habit.It is possible that what really gnaws at their insides is a deep seated emotional turmoil which their subconscious mind does not allow to come up and all this worrying is only a camouflage for it.Only the person concerned can explore his psyche or take help, to reach the crux of the problem.Until this is done real peace will be evasive.Your personality also plays a major role in precipitating worries.Don't always be on your toes to please everyone,to be perfect,or to be ready for any eventuality.Relax,take it easy.Shun kill-joys and find time for some entertainment.Train your mind to warn you whenever you slip into the worry mode,pinch yourself hard and change tracks.You can also ask your dear ones to check you when they see you going into a trance.Do some relaxation exercises like meditation or yoga.A person who worries too much tends to also worry about matters which are not his direct concern.These could extend from social,cultural and political issues to existential questions.Life is not a roller-coaster ride for anyone today and we shall be happier if we did not add additional burden to our minds.It is necessary to filter out anxieties which do not relate directly to us.Make a note of the time slots in which you have intense worrying sessions.Find out an absorbing activity to fill those time slots.When the body is inactive the worry worm becomes active.If you are a believer then there should be absolutely no cause for worry because He will take care of you;and if you are not, then have faith in your own abilities.