Thursday, January 26, 2012

I've found it! The Key to Staying Sane As a Stay At Home Mother!

I've discovered something pretty amazing. The key to staying sane as a stay at home mother. I've been testing this two part technique out for a year now and I'm pretty sure it's a winner.

Part one:

SUPERMOM DAY

"Oh my, I wasn't expecting company! Please, have one of my famous sugar cookies just out of the oven! Would you like to stay for beef bourgogne?"

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The Supermom day is a happening that can't be planned. It happens organically. You just have to be ready for it. You wake up one day and just feel good. You feel motivated. You feel rested. On a morning like that, you decide then and there that this will be a Supermom day and you make it happen. You get up and get dressed in clothes that are a combination of, "I'm a mom so I'm comfy, but it's a Supermom day, so I look awesome too". Make-up is required. Then you get to work. You tap into that extra energy as long as it lasts. I have a list of Supermom Day chores that just wait for these days. Organize the pantry, clean the baseboards, clean the light fixtures. I might organize the toys with the kids, tickling and playing while we clean. Also, I do a lot of baking and cooking on Supermom days. Almost always, I make cookies or muffins with the kids and a big pot of homemade soup. (Made this soup on a recent Supermom day.) During the whole day I try to include them and play as much as I can. The key to a Supermom day is being able to realize when you have the right attitude and energy to have one, and then to make it last all day. I can't tell you how much I get done on these days. Usually Shane comes home to a spotless home with a beautiful dinner and very happy kids.

Of course, the caveat is that you will be totally and utterly exhausted at the end of the day and you will probably be asleep at 9pm. So your husband won't be getting any action that night. I said Supermom day, not Superwife day.

Supermom days should not be attempted too often. I have one about twice a month. Of course, I'm doing a lot of these things on every other day of my life, but Supermom days are special. They are a positive day of exhaustive constant work to catch up on all of the things that you just can't get to on normal days. At the end of the day I feel happy and satisfied.

Part 2:

THE "I NO WORK TODAY" DAY

"What do you mean? I am dressed for the day."

The "I no work today" day is crucial to a stay at home mother's sanity. See, stay at home moms don't get Saturdays in the conventional sense. Remember how when you worked and Saturday was a day that was different from every other day? A break from the routine? Maybe even a day to yourself? Well, that isn't the case for stay at home moms. Everyday is the same. Everyday you make 3 meals, wipe bums, clean up toys, wash dishes, deal with tantrums.....every single day of your existence. And of course its wonderful. But sometimes you just need to rest. Every once in a while you have to have a "Saturday" when your day focuses on something other than the routine.

This is when you have a ""I no work today" day. You don't plan it. It just happens. You wake up and feel crappy. You are tired, unmotivated or on your period. What you want is a day off. The "I no work today" day is the closest you are going to get. First of all, to really be a "I no work today" day, you must announce it to your family.

And you have to do it in an old Chinese lady accent.

"Hey! I no work today!"

It's the only way it's official. I don't know why, but that's how it works. I don't question.

Now the key to a "I no work today" day is make a goal to do no more than is totally essential. Normally if you just laid around, you would see it as a failure of a day. But making a it a goal to do so? Well then you have set yourself up for success. My my, what a wonderfully successful day of unwinding. Getting dressed? Who needs it? Breakfast? Emergency pop tarts of course! Spending time with the kids? Well, I'll be reading on the couch, so you guys enjoy some serious cartoon time. Lunch...the gas station has a drive thru! Diet coke for me, corn dogs, popcorn and slurpees for the kids! Dinner? Well, luckily I froze some soup from my last Supermom day, so I will drop that in a pot.

Usually I will make myself spend 30 minutes quickly cleaning up before Shane gets home so that he will be able to walk through the door without breaking his leg. (I always let him know when a "I no work today" day is in the works.) He comes home to a lack luster dinner, messy home and very happy kids. They LOVE an occasional day of TV and junk food. At the end of the day I feel happy and rested. So rested, I'm usually able to be a very good wife later on.

For me, "I no work today" days usually happen about twice a month. You can also claim several weeks of "I no work today" days during your first trimester of pregnancy, your 9th month of pregnancy and any time when you had nights dealing with colic or puke. Click here for a recent post from a "I no work today" day.

It seems simple, but adding these two days into your routine just might save you. Try it out and let me know if it works for you too...

Ok that was too funny. I've been doing that since we decided that I needed to stay home almost two years ago, I just never had a name for the days. We just called it my "Awesome day" and "just one of THOSE days" I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who does that.

Baha I love this! I am not a mom but as a student and wife I could spend 24 hours a day doing homework and still not do it all. So, some days I declare war. I'm sure it will be even more effective when I am a mom.

Lol, I love this! It's so nice to hear another mom who operates like a human being. Sometimes as a SAHM I feel pressured to have things perfect all the time, but maintaining sanity is way more integral to a child's upbringing than a perfectly organized house!