3. Assertive behaviour

Assertive behaviour (win/win) entails standing up for your own rights without violating another person’s
rights. It involves expressing your needs, wants, opinions, beliefs and feelings in a direct, honest and
adult way. The aim of assertive behaviour is to communicate productively with another person achieving
what is often described as a win/win outcome.

Aggressive behaviour (win/lose) means standing up for your rights in such a way that you violate the
other person’s rights. It involves expressing your needs, wants, opinions, beliefs and feelings in
inappropriate ways, often ignoring or dismissing the rights of other people. The aim of aggressive
behaviour is to win, if necessary at the expense of others.

Submissive behaviour (lose/win) means failing to stand up for your rights or doing so in a way that
others feel they can disregard them. It involves expressing your needs, wants, opinions, beliefs and
feelings in apologetic, tentative, self-effacing ways or even dishonest ways. Often the aim of
submissive behaviour is to avoid perceived conflict and to please others.