Thursday 25 November 2010 19.31 EST
First published on Thursday 25 November 2010 19.31 EST

Hello Ray. Hello Small Talk, how are you.

Very well, thanks. First things first, how's life treating you as frontman for all things football at ESPN? It's terrific, it's really great. We've got a breadth of stuff they've asked me to work on: Premier League, FA Cup, SPL, Europa League and a little chat show. So yeah, I'm really enjoying it.

But there's no snooker in that list, Ray. No darts. Surely you miss your annual excursions to the Crucible Theatre in Sheffield and Lakeside Country Club at Frimley Green? I do miss the Crucible and the Lakeside, but it doesn't mean that I can't go there and enjoy the snooker and the darts anyway. They were a big part of my career for quite a while when I was at the BBC, but now I'm in this new chapter, it just means I can enjoy them in a different way. In the Lakeside in particular, I can stand among the mayhem and the madness and view it from a different perspective.

Speaking of mayhem and madness, in an interview with Irish magazine Hot Press in 2006, Noel Gallagher from Oasis declared that "Ray Stubbs is a fucking legend". Are you aware of that? Am I aware of that? I've got the article blown up, framed and made into wallpaper for my house. Actually I haven't, but it's given me a good idea.

Can you remember why this Mancunian wild man of rock thinks you're a legend? I can remember the incident vividly, yes.

And would you care to share it with our readers? It was at the World Cup 2006 wrap partyand we were playing a drinking game that the younger generation of the BBC staff present launched. When the challenge was set, I felt I had to stick up for the old brigade and try to hold my own.

According to Gallagher, you downed two steins of German lager in the time it took the assembled throng to sing the theme music to Match of the Day. That's impressive ... I can't remember the exact details, but it was something like that. As an observer from afar, Noel was probably in a better position to remember than me. As someone who admires his music so much, I was incredibly pleased when I heard he'd said that.

It seems to have been quite a party, with Gallagher there, alongside Alessandro Del Piero and Spike Lee, among other celebrities. It was fascinating. Martin O'Neill was there, Marcel Desailly ... Leonardo. In fact the final line of the Fiver the day after was that the "the BBC's wrap party wasn't as dull as the coverage".

You present classic matches on ESPN and you played yourself ... [Interrupting] I didn't play.

Eh? Yes you did, for Tranmere Rovers. I don't think you can class Tranmere Rovers reserves and Bangor City [and two other teams Small Talk didn't quite get the name of] as playing.

They're considerably higher peaks than Small Talk has ever scaled, don't do yourself down Stubbsy. Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly proud to have represented my hometown team, but I am officially the worst left-back in the history of Tranmere Rovers Football Club and am quite honoured to hold that position.

Do you think football was better in the old days: muddy pitches, sixpence to get in, wooden crossbars ... that kind of thing? No, I don't think it was better, I just think it was different. I love all the debates we always have about whether this team would beat that team, or if this player was better than that player, but I've always just felt that you are a player of your era in a different set of circumstances.

Who are your own favourite players these days? When he returns to his best, Wayne Rooney.

Do you think he'll return to his best? Absolutely yes. What a waste it would be if he doesn't. I also wish I'd had a bet at the start of the season on Nicolas Anelka doing really well. Given what he went through in the summer, I just thought 'This fella will be absolutely motivated to give of his best.' I like Anelka and I tell you what, if Drogba can play like he has been suffering from malaria ... wow! Other players: I've enjoyed watching Van der Vaart, I watch Robin van Persie with great interest, because I remember Arsène Wenger saying a few years ago that he has it within him to be anything he wants to be, so I'm interested to see if that's the case. But the Premier League is so competitive at the moment that you can pick any team and find somebody great playing, because you just don't know what's going to happen on any given day.

Now, your charity work for Sport Relief. Which is more scary: being dropped into a pile of cardboard boxes from 100 feet, or strapped to a pole and being hit by thousands of stinging jet balls? I look back on all that stuff with great affection. The whole point of it was "Let's try and create a little bit of decent telly that will get a bit more money in the pot for a very worthy cause". As you can imagine, there was quite a few people in regard to health and safety around as well, and it was just great fun.

Who are your favourite pundits? I now work alongside Kevin Keegan at ESPN and having done so for a while I can completely understand the charisma and personality that he brings into a football club to get the best out of people.MarkLawrenson and Alan Hansen were the centrepiece of that great Liverpool team and they were a fanastic centrepiece for Match of the Day for a long time. I enjoy Terry Venables's company and I'd pick out Lee Dixon as a very strong pundit. I also think Garth Crooks is very under-rated as a pundit and Marcel Desailly too. I think in broadcast terms, I'd also rate Steve Davis and John Parrott as highly as any of the football pundits I've mentioned. But if you're talking of pundits, without exception, they all have to bow at the feet of Bobby George.

Despite being quite an enthusiastic Tweeter, I notice you haven't posted anything on your Twitter page since August. Why Stubbsy? Why? I've actually never been a user of Twitter. There was a person purporting to be me on Twitter and I hope they enjoyed themselves.

Really? Yes, really. A couple of friends of mine started tweeting whoever it was really impertinent questions, then finally asked 'How can you be tweeting this when I'm standing right beside you?' It kind of stopped then.

That's very strange, because most of the entries seemed ... em ... eh ... So dull it could have been me?

Yes, but we didn't want to say that. Well I'm happy to say it for you. It wasn't me, but maybe I ought to start. I'm plucking up the courage.

Cheese or chocolate, Stubbsy? Oh, both.

Who do you think would win a fight between a lion and a tiger? I think the tiger would have too much pace and would be able to use the ring to better advantage.

Football in 3D or football in 2D? I like the idea of wearing those glasses, so 3D works for me.

OK, Ray, thanks for your time. Thanks Small Talk. Bye.

•Ray Stubbs was speaking at the launch of an initiative between 188BET and Top Up TV, who are offering British fans three months of top class sports action on ESPN for free. Click on the link for more information.