Time to Accept the End of Marriage?

“Is it time to embrace the end of marriage and embrace some new ideas about romance and family? …Does culture have it right or is there something better?”asks Tim Sisarich as he narrates a new movie, “Irreplaceable,” a full-length film about the desire for significance and the need for familyopening in theatersMay 6.

Sisarich’s question summarizes what some commentators have started to wonder about the trajectory of marriage in modern culture. In the 1960s, nearly nine out of 10 children lived with two parents. Fast-forward 50 years: today, more than one-fourth of all children live in single-parent households—most with their mothers. In the 1960s, roughly 5 percent of children were born to single women. Today, that number is over 40 percent.

We know that fathers are critical to child development and there’s a lot of pain associated with fathers not being involved in their children’s lives. And so, women who feel that they’ve been rejected by their fathers, have a fear of rejection, abandonment, they have a fear of commitment, a feeling of being unworthy, and of being unlovable. And for boys, we see high rates of aggression, violence, and expressions of anger. And so we know that boys need these models of manhood, and they’re losing out on that by not having their fathers involved in their lives.

Single parents and their children are also at greater risk of government dependence. In 2011, roughly three-quarters of the more than $450 billion in federal welfare funding for low-income families with children went to single-parent households.

However, fathers’ role in the lives of their children goes beyond economic benefits. Having an involved father influences childhood educational achievement. For instance, adolescents who spend leisure time with their fathers, eat meals as a family, and receive help with homework tend to earn better grades in school.

Teenagers from intact families are more likely to be emotionally healthy and have higher self-esteem. Boys who have grown up with their married moms and dad are less likely to have behavioral problems, such as heightened aggression or substance abuse. Girls with absent fathers have seven to eight times higher teenage pregnancy rates. But teenagers who report close relationship with their fathers are more likely to avoid teen pregnancy and anticipate having a stable marriage in the future.

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Yes, all good. But the key problem is that people don’t want to know the real reasons for this.

The death of the family is directly caused by a 200 year movement that began with the Romantic era. Women were pedestalized and declared to be angelic beings that need to be worshiped and protected. So women started to be excused and exempt from all consequences of their actions. They asked, men complied. Flogging is cruel punishment, so women ought to be exempt, never mind little hungry 12 year old boys who may have stolen a bread or a penny.

Soon the tender years doctrine was crafted and women were given license to steal a man’s offspring should they decide to leave.

Soon various women-instigated women-centric anti-male social panics have caused all sorts of evil, such as the lynchings which Latimer Felton promoted “let there be a 1000 lynchings per weak if it stops (black) men from raping (white) women”. Rape culture has always been rape hysteria.

The myth was born that women suffer under men’s brutality — when that was never true. Domestic violence had always been (and is everywhere in the world) a fairly equal thing both on the perpetrator and victim count. But the myth of the evil man and the suffering woman was immensely compelling. Men love women and wanted to rescue them (once they noted how this mindset was screwing over themselves or their brothers, it was too late.) So a woman could soon falsely accuse her husband of violence, shed a few tears and retire in alimony pension with his children and money. Today that is sold to women to “take the trash out” and the scheme works like a charm.

Only today society doesn’t care any more. There is no more social pressure to keep women married. So they divorce in droves after taking everything (and the kitchen sink) from their hapless ex-husband. 70% of divorces are filed by women, and in the USA men hand over a net 22 billion USD to women via the child support system alone (not to mention alimony and the hefty asset division imbalancess in favor of women.)

But the worst of all the ways by which men had screwed and debased themselves in their mindless worship of women (apart from handing them a vote without demanding anything in return, let alone respect) was the creation of the welfare state.

In the past, a woman had to restrain herself somewhat and seek some fair arrangement in order to prepare some family life to carry her through life before having children. Today, with the welfare system it doesn’t matter any more. Women can do exactly everything they want, and while not terribly luxurious in all cases, can be certain that someone will ALWAYS bail them out. Having hostage of the kids, and under the cloak of the myth of motherhood, women get away with stealing, and murder, but by default get support and at least loads of attention for “women’s issues” and the horrible thing that women may be poor (when they did everything to repel or eject any decent man who would have taken care of her.)

This issue is a major social issue and a UK parliamentarian had recently warned that while the particular single mother welfare system costs 9 billion pound per year (and that is just the tip of the iceberg) the cost of dealing with the mess caused by this family breakdown is 48 billion pounds. The impact of this issue is astronomical.

But there is no solution other than confronting the core issues. What is needed is:

– hold women accountable for their decisions, particularly those stupid selfish decisions early in life

– stop bailing out women, whether young, or old, mothers or not

– dismantle welfare, welfare is the state marrying women and essentially disenfranchising men from any benefit of being responsible providers

– punish all killings and physical harm done by women at the same (measurable) sentences as men, no more “battered women” or “PMS” or “post partum depression” defenses.

– punish abortion as murder, no excuse

– no free birth control to women

In other words, treat women equal under the law and don’t force men to hand funds over to women for nothing in return. I.e., reduce taxes (80% of which are paid by women and the vast majority of which benefits accrue to women), no alimony no community property share to divorcing women, each keeps what they earned with their own hands labor. And no child support, simply allocate the children with the parent who can best provide for them, that is in most cases the father. Treat it as a child’s unalienable right to have meaningful time with both of its parents.

Again, all it takes is equality under the law and no more women-pandering goodies of any kind. After 200 years addiction, women will have great withdrawal pain. There will be howling and gnashing of teeth. But there is no other way. If it isn’t done peacefully in democratic processes, much greater howling and gnashing of teeth will come when western society collapses for the death of the cells of life that brought its existence, the family.

Oh, but it is probably already too late, because unfortunately the biggest mistake western society made was giving women a vote as part of the package of complete indulge and pandering. We shall reap what we have sown.

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