W O R (L) D

Sitting back in my bed looking some cars and trams down there from this 5th floor flat, I now realize that world keep going on no matter what are you doing right now. Rapid change of humanity could be faster than years ago whether we realize or not. Boom! We are here, facing our own life without any other party (like parents did) deciding what’s better for us. So this is what we want, right? No intervention from everyone else about choosing our next step ahead. I mean, we are heading forward like we know everything as this is our life and nobody could mess this up. Really?

Teenage dreams are all about freedom. Let us say that we will live separately with parents someday. To be honest, this case I don’t really like. When I have to go far away to this city, I think I couldn’t be sadder than this. I love my parents, my live in Makassar also. I let them give me the freedom without asking for it, in some other words they are asking me to see the world as I can, when I know deep down inside they are in a turning point to realize that their only one daughter is now old enough to see the world by her own eyes.

You know what, sometime I feel like I am behind the wheel. Having a very huge different world right now is a thing that I should praise not to condemn. Can I say that this is kind a like a new beginning of a new step of my life? There is a lot of works to be done, people to be known (perhaps, not for this time), and places to be gone. Okay, ignore the fact that we are in the same level of hell facing a same model of evil! We live in the same earth but we live in the different world, we sin differently. This is the point.

Being judged is more often I face now on, without any chance to explain those judgments to those judgmental people. Simple, grown up people don’t do that. So, let me be clear that when I get that judgment I will say that those honor judges are immature. Sound’s fair?

There is a linkage for these two points: parents and judgmental people. Being around my parents creates me a paradise, being around those judgmental people of course no doubt gives me a hell. Yet, I think and believe very well that as long as my parents don’t turn into such kind of judgmental, I will live my life happily. See, people who know you well won’t become the opposite even we know that to judge someone at least we need to know them first. Am I right?

Sounds like I am so grumpy?

Now I finally experience what I call backstabbing, being minority, being alone, and the most important is being a survivor. People will come and go as the wind blows and you still walk in your path. Nothing changed.