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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Confessions

First off, I should stop writing my blog posts when I'm angry/depressed/revising/hungry/working/up too late. Wait. That's all the time. So yeah. I apologize to you, my dearest readers, for taking out my...whatevers here on the blog.

Anyway, today is confession day here at the Elana Johnson blog.

Mine?

I hate (hate hate) how Twitter makes me feel like an utter and complete loser/outsider.

There, I said it.

Twitter is by far my least-favorite social medium. Because there's all these people that you "know" and they're all having these exclusive conversations with each other. Not you. Oh, no. You're not funny/smart/famous enough. You haven't been to NYC. You haven't been to SCBWI-LA. You don't vlog. You're a loser!

So there. There's my confession. I don't like Twitter. And as irrational as my feelings may be, I hate how I feel like a freaky sixteen-year-old who doesn't fit in with the cool crowd on Twitter.

I adore the #kidlitchat and the #YAlitchat on Twitter. And last week, we dished about social media. One of the big things that I swear I knew, but don't do, is that you should do what you love. Love blogging? (Yes.) Do that. Twitter? (No.) Don't do that.

So I'm going to be taking that advice. I might still lurk on Twitter, but as soon as I feel the I'm-a-loser vibe coming on, I'm closing it down. Sound good?

What about you? Do you like Twitter? Hate it? In between? What else do you feel like you need to get off your chest today?

I'm still trying to figure out Twitter. I agree with you. I can't follow the discussions and feel like I'm eavesdropping. Or like you said, like I'm a 16 year old who doesn't fit in. And I so hate that feeling.

Wow, um, me too! There I said it too and it feels good! I love Facebook- but that's where my family and friends are. I think the worst thing is when I see a whitty comment from someone on Twitter, like from an agent for example, and I want to respond back but if/when I do I feel like I'm a stalker.

I was on, got off got on again. The thing is, I have to go to twitter dot com. I like stuff to come to me. :D If I could get twitter feeds on my homepage or in my inbox? I'd be gold. So, now I have an account under a pen name and she only follows industry people...and I still have no idea what they are tweeting. I am not better off for having that account. :P LOL on the other hand, if i sold something, I would probably tweet that... and I think as a selling professional it could be usable.

I'm going to have to go against the flow here. I LOVE Twitter. It's my favorite networking site. I can make a list of my peeps and check out their status in a matter of moments. I don't have to sift through all the BS on Facebook. Because posts are limited to 140 characters, the updates are succinct and don't go on and on about mundane coffee brewing episodes like I find on Facebook.

Another thing I like about it is that it is more industry driven as far as writing goes. People tend to post about releases, sales and retweet quotable posts. My favorite is links to industry articles. Loads of agents, editors and published authors are members.

As far as the inside conversations, I ignore those. I also don't put them in my list of people to follow. They stay on my home page, but I rarely read their updates. There are a couple of aspiring writers who do nothing but talk cryptically to one another, so I get what you are saying, Elana. It's irritating.

As for feeling outside, it's the internet. We are ALL outside. Once again, I get what you are saying and it makes total sense. I guess it's just a personal thing. I prefer to be the tiny little fish in with the big boys than be the one on the inside. I learn a lot more that way. I love to be surrounded by people more in the know and further up the food chain.

Still, I totally understand your feeling, Elana. It's why some folks (like me) don't like to blog. I feel inadequate when I do because I've nothing unique to share that's worthy of a full post. I prefer the 140 character tweet and run. Facebook is still going strong because Twitter is an acquired taste. I just happen to have developed a taste for it.

Bwahahaha.....you are so NEVER an outsier! really! As for Twitter, I have friends I chat with there...and others I see only on FB. So, yeah, I keep both. I do get social media burnout from time to time, so taking a break is something I MUST do.

Good luck wth everything, and I agree with the idea that you should just do the forms of social networking you enjoy!

I haven't started Twitter yet - and now I'm feeling like I'm in no rush. Thanks for giving me the permission to hold off! What are your thoughts on Facebook? I keep hearing I need to have a page, but I'm dragging my feet on that too.

I honestly have stayed completely away from Twitter on purpose. I just know that if I begin using it, it'll be another time-suck that drains away all my available time - while not really giving me anything useful.

I always feel like a loser on twitter- always left out of the conversation. It's not my favorite medium, but I feel like if I'm not on it, I'm missing out on something (doesn't make any sense) Also, for a writer, 140 characters is just annoying. I mean, that's why I blog. So I can babble endlessly without limits ;-)

I'm in between. What's tough about it is that you don't see the parts of the conversation that come from people you don't follow. So if someone you follow replies to someone you don't, you've no idea what they're talking about.

I use twitter somewhat sparingly, usually I try to tweet about my blog posts.

I'm ambivalent towards twitter. I think it's kind of fun to read some of the tweets - I like knowing about events and new blog postings. I don't really like to tweet much myself though. I don't feel left out - secure enough with myself not to care. I can join the conversations if I really want to - usually I don't want to.

I signed up to Twitter back in December of last year when a blogger friend kept bugging me to join. I don't think I've done a hundred tweets there.

I hate the obligation of trying to come up with something interesting to say(tweet). I much prefer to be a lurker. I feel the same way about Facebook. One day, I might get into those things... probably the same day I get published and need to promote myself.

Twitter makes me insecure. I like it, but I am almost scared of it in a "OMG. If I post something that sounds funny now, I can't edit it and what if it isn't really that funny and they notice and also see the toilet paper stuck to the bottom of my shoe." Weird. I know. I think the other thing is it is so available. I have clients that can find me and I don't like it! They think I'm smart and here I go using the word poop again in a post.

I'm what marketers like to call an 'Early Adopter', and I tried Twitter a long time ago before its popularity boomed. I have to say I couldn't see the draw, and still don't. I have a Twitter account that I still lurk on from time to time, but I never tweet. For me, with time a valuable commodity, this is one social medium I can do without.

Hi Elana. I like Twitter, but I often feel exactly as you describe. Outside the circle, watching the cool kids, trying not to act like a complete dork. I've been to SCBWI LA and NY and I still feel that way. Even at the conferences, aside from the small group of friends I've made, I feel on the outside. I suspect it's just my perception of the world and not reality. But that doesn't make it any easier. I hope you won't give up on Twitter, mostly because I think the chats you mentioned are so good. That's when I'm on there the most, and have found when I jump into the chat conversations, I've been welcomed by everyone.

I signed up because I knew a gazillion people doing it. It's so not for me- I totally felt like the odd kid out. And since I was always the odd kid out in gym class I'd prefer not to repeat that feeling.

I'm what you call a spatz twitter. I have moments I'll go in and it seems entertaining. Then I'll have that "ugh" moment and stay away for a few months. Facebook I think is another high school popularity contest. The only reason I keep it up is my daughter. I shut down the applications and still it's kind of blah.

I don't and won't sit there and comment on what I'm doing every single moment of the day. Who has time for that? (Hugs)Indigo

Twitter? Not signed up yet... no plans to sign up in the near future... So see... don't feel too bad. And also don't feel bad if you don't vlog. I personally am not a fan. It's hard to do a vlog well (John Green style) and most of the time I'd rather read an author's blog rather than listen to them talk: You are a writer, right? So... write! :D I think you're doing a smash up job!!

I agree completely. I feel totally out of place on Twitter. I signed up quite a while ago--months ago--but I think I've only done like 50 tweets. It might be less than that. I just can't get into it. But I love blogging, so that's what I put the bulk of my energy into. Great post!

Hmmm. I'm torn on Twitter. At first I completely did not see the draw. After being on it for some time now, I find that I like what it has to offer, even though I still feel like bit of a lurker/uncool kid/stalker/you name it. I think I'm going to continue on it, but probably not invest as much time in it.

Thanks for this post. I've been on the fence about twitter for ages. I've had an account for almost a year and have never used it. It's confusing and I haven't wanted to take the time to figure it out. And I'm with Eric about the time-suck concern. Elana, I appreciate your advice about using the online tools that feel right. I totally agree.

Great one Elana. All social media sites are tough for me. I am better one-on-one, or at least in groups that are smaller than ~5 people. I crave eye-to-eye contact and don't enjoy yelling over the fray.Blogging is the closest SN medium I have found to this kind of intimacy... but even then, I prefer writing my novel(s).When I am eye-to-eye it is so much easier to convey goofy sarcasm... sound bites make my brand of humor (I am not saying it's any good) come off as snarky. Keep up the posts.

I just can't get into it, and it's too much of a time suck, because I like blogging. I love reading other blogs, and I like to go back and read old posts when I first discover a blog. If something exciting happens on Twitter, I'm sure someone will blog about it the following day. ;)

I'm sticking to blogging, because it's what I like, and it's what I'm good at.

Never tried Twitter. I don't even have time for blogs anymore. If I was a speed blogger like this awesome girl I know, maybe it'd be different. ;o) As it is, I read, like, 5 of my friends' blogs once a week or so. :-D

When you commanded us to Confess at the end of your post, I stammered a bit, trying to think of something to confess. So maybe my confession is that I get nervous when I'm put on the spot. ;o)

No, here's my real confession - I always get this irrational fear as I'm leaving the library that it's going to beep and people will think I'm stealing books. Like, really, my heartrate goes through the roof and I feel like a fugitive as I sneak out the doors. But on the rare occasion that it does beep, the nice librarian lady just smiles and waves me through because she knows she just signed those books out to me mere seconds ago and that I'm not a criminal. So, yeah. There's my confession for the day. ;o)

I'm another one who *adores* twitter...I've connected with some fabulous authors, I follow industry professionals that I may not interact with much, but the wealth of information they share is mind-boggling, and I love the sense of community that #writegoal and #amwriting give to my late-night writing stints. #writechat is mind-boggling to try to participate in, but there's great information to glean just watching it go by.

Sure, there are people having conversations all around...it's just like any party, where people are chatting with friends, and sometimes you jump in, sometimes you just watch and listen. The thing is, if you don't want to feel like an "outsider", you have to be willing to jump in - join conversations, add your opinions, or even just offer congratulations/support. Offering a kind word or congratulations to someone is the best way I've found to strike up friendships on twitter - show you care about others, and they'll care about you.

You and I must miss each other a lot there (though I don't participate in the chats you mention...I don't write YA) - I'm sure if I saw something from you come across my tweet stream, I'd respond back...I'm more than happy to chit chat with anyone. :-)

Not sure if you caught it, but one of my bits of advice during that SM chat was to be inclusive, not cliquey or coded. This is EXACTLY why. I unfollow people who only go back and forth with their buddies and/or talk inside jokes / coded comments, etc. I think the same goes for blogs.

There can be some of that but it shouldn't be the majority of what you tweet/post.

I love Twitter. The thing I love about it is you get out what you put in. If I do a zillion tweets for the day, respond to other people's tweets and just use the heck out of it, then it comes back to me just like that. But, if I want to just not use it for a day then my stream stays pretty quiet.

Now facebook... I hate facebook. It's this weird mix-up of professional contacts, fellow mommies from around town, and then high school friends. Sometimes someone will 'tag' a picture of me from high school and I have to jump on FB and get rid of it pretty much faster than you can say OH CRAP That's Jamie and she was (FILLINTHEBLANKWITHSOMETHINGSTUPIDHERE).

If I had to pick just one of the social-y things to do, it would definitely be twitter. The writing contacts alone make it worthwhile.

Hi Elana! I don't...tweet. Is that the right word? But I confess having similar feelings about FaceBook. (*gasp*) I don't have enough time to read blogs (which I love to do), write (which I love to do) and pretend to clean house (LOL) as it is. Chatting with high school "friends" I don't remember and hearing every detail of my loved ones' days just holds zero appeal. Of course, my four sisters campaign for me joining FaceBook for the first five minutes of every phone call they have to make to me, since I'm not on FaceBook. Annoying.

Now...if an agent or publisher told me to get my a$$ on FaceBook and start marketing myself, I'd do it in a heartbeat :D

I've decided that I won't twitter right now. Too much to handle for me.I get what you're saying too. I saw someone's tweet somewhere to another person I know and I got this sad little feeling (seriously) and wished that I was chatting too.But I don't have time for that so...I have to get over my own dreams of "coolness". LOL

I SO know what you mean about Twitter. We use it for posting random thoughts (ie The bachelor was weeping last night and I just felt the world needed to share in that lameness with me), but that's about it. We ignore the cliques because we're cool like that. Ha!

I was on Twitter before it blew up everywhere. It wasn't too fun then, mostly because like 2 of my friends were on it and 1 of them barely ever used it. I finally got back into it a few months later (after graduation) when a bunch of my friends from college started using it. I like it because it's an easy way for me to keep up with the friends who don't live anywhere near me. I mean, I can chat with them w/o their having to actually be online at the time. It's also made keeping up and chatting with, say, online writer friends easier.

It's also a random enough forum for me to share amusing links and random observations. Those types of things are a little too random for like a blog or facebook, I think.

So give it some time and don't be afraid to be random! Just don't be a RT spammer. ;)

I Tweet. We've even tweeted to each other. Say... why don't we use the hashtag #ht when we Tweet (ht = Hate Twitter). That way, all of us losers can commiserate about our loserness. But still Tweet and respond to each other. No?

I'm not a Twitter kind of girl -- maybe it's a personality thing. I have read a YAlitchat transcript but that's about it. I'm not stressing about it because I think you have to do what feels right for you. I'd rather put my energy into things like writing/revising followed by social networking I actually enjoy (Facebook, blogging).

Yeah. I have no idea how twitter works. I have an account that I have logged into once. I love facebook (unless they do some kind of update to the page and make it wonky for a while.)

My secret confession is that I hate editing. Unless it's someone else's stuff. I could edit for others all the time. I, however, should be writing the perfect first draft and have a hard time finding distance from it.

Thanks for being HONEST. I've been holding off on participating with twitter,(I've joined, but I'm not active) because, frankly, I think what I do for social networking already takes up too much time (what I can justify giving to it). I really like blogging, but every time I've checked out twitter, I felt overwhelmed, I don't understand all the short cuts or the culture.

I do see the benefits of twitter as a marketing tool, so when I get to the point where I have an agent and a book deal, I will hop on twitter for that reason. At least give it a shot.

Brian!! Yes, we have chatted on twitter - the only place we've chatted. This is true. And I'm so using the hashtag #ht from now on. SO TOTALLY DOING THAT.

I wish I had time to reply to every one of you. I've been getting to some through email, but I appreciate the validation that it's not just me. (You have no idea how apprehensive I was about this post today!)

I'm glad there are some positive voices for twitter. Let me just say that I DO stalk literary agents, publishing people, etc. on twitter. I like that. I click on links and articles I wouldn't see otherwise. And I do love the chats, as I said. So it's not a total bust. It's just not "my kind" of social media. I far prefer blogs and facebook.

I have to say... I do like twitter. MOST of the time. But I definitely need breaks sometimes too, because I get that SAME feeling that you just described. I always go back though, because I've met some really funny and sweet writers through the medium and I love to keep in touch with them :-)

I have to confess that I don't "get" Twitter. I'm not a subscriber, but when someone like you provides a link to what is supposed to be some fascinating conversation, I'll click it. And what I see makes absolutely no sense to me. It looks like everyone's just repeating what the last person said. I know there's got to be something I'm missing, but who has time to figure this stuff out?

It took me a while to figure out the basics of Twitter. At first it looked like some type of video game with all these little heads, lol.

I like twitter because it's immediate. And, I like all the links people post. And, I like connecting with people. I'm pretty isolated most of the day, so a short twitter break helps me to feel less so.

Time is important and so is happiness. There are so many ways to connect with people these days, I think, if possible, it's important to enjoy the networks we choose to participate in.

That said, I've got a facebook account but it feels pretty foreign to me. That's where I feel like a loser:-)

I have become a Twitter lover. It took me some time, though. And honestly, I thought you were one of the cool kids, so don't we all have our little insecurities? I have made a few amazing connections through Twitter, and I have deleted a few very lame tweets, but I'll still throw out congratulations, or mention something we have in common (like Ali tweeted about writing and Cinnamon bears and I had JUST blogged about the SAME THING, laaa, friendship born)and you can bet if you, Elana, post a link to something, I check it out, because I read your blog and trust your judgement (no pressure). And now, since I know you are accepting new kids to sit at your table, I will reply, RT, #FF, and all that other stuff I had to look up to figure out how to do, and happily join you.But yeah, sometimes I take a few days off. It is a dream of mine to enter the tweetdeck after an absence and be greeted with "Krista!" just like Norm on Cheers.I'm kidding.But it's a great networking tool once you get past the ????. I'll look for you.

The embarrassing truth? I wouldn't know how to Twitter if my life depended on it. I'm barely catching on to the whole blogging scene, and I find that intimidating enough. I'm definitely out of the loop as far as Twitter goes. Thanks to this blog, I don't feel so bad about that:)

We've chatted a few times ;) I love stalking the agents and editors - never comment, but follow their links too. I enjoy some of the discussions on there like on Sundays is #writechat - check it out if you haven't!

My confession: I still haven't even tried Twitter. Never even gone to the site. Why you ask? Because I am too addicted as it is to blogging and can't waste any other time doing something besides writing!

I'm VERY happy to hear your venting post since I've been an UBER-LOSER and not even joined Twitter. So thank you.

And for the record - I totally think you rock and love your newsletter!

I am also not a huge fan of Twitter. I'm a member of several group blogs, and I love that...but Twitter, not so much. It has it's purpose I suppose, but still - I don't use it for much besides saying random things. :P

I tweet on twitter, but not all that often. If you're seeing tweets that you don't like or don't want to read, drop that person from your follow list, then you won't see their tweets. As my daughter said, you do not have to follow everyone who follows you.

I feel like a stalker when I'm on Twitter. I'll post updates occasionally and I'll respond to other people's comments, but I'm not into the back and forth conversations. Makes me feel like I'm at the uncool table, too:(

It took me a long time to learn my way around twitter, and I do like it. I like following agents and following the kidlit chat and Yalitchat... but...I also feel like I'm begging for attention or intruding into people's conversations when I reply to a comment. For a while, I'd open my tweetdeck on my phone a gazillion times a day to see if someone had replied to me, and if they didn't, I'd feel left out. I know it's so dumb to feel like this, but I can't help it. So I try not to even go to twitter much anymore.

Wow! I've never signed up for Twitter, simply because I ... well I thought it was stupid. :DI'm really glad I didn't. I was on Myspace for the longest time, now I'm on that and FaceBook. I never thought I would like FB as much as I do. I have to say, though, I can't stand the new MySpace look. I've got over 500+ friends and suddenly I feel like I am no longer the networking force I used to be. Oh well. FB is better anyway.And hey, don't worry about laying out your issues in a blog. People like to know you're human. ;D Keep up the good work!

For me, Twitter is an unknown. Like time-travel and sushi, I just don't get it. When I don't get something, I dabble in it. After the trial run, it's either my favorite new thing (blogging) or I wish I could time-travel three months and sixteen days and avoid trying certain things (Twitter).

I fluctuate between loving and hating Twitter. On a lot of days, I feel like you do: a Twitter loser. I feel like it takes up a lot of time to keep up with Twitter. You have to be on all the time in order to keep conversations going--and if you go for a few days without checking Twitter, you feel very much out-of-the-loop when you return.

It's an awesome place for lurking and getting writing advice, and sometimes, for meeting new people. But it's very easy to lose track of, and easier to feel like an outsider.

Ultimately, I think you just have to choose what's the best social medium for you. For me, it's still blogging. I can keep track of blogs much better than I can tweets: because I can do it on my own time and at my own pace.

I, personally, do not Twitter. I know that if I did, I would always have it open on my screen and would suck an hour or more out of my day. I already have enough time vampires without inviting another one in.

I am not a huge fan of twitter. I feel the same way - left out of conversations. Some of my favorite bloggers are constantly tweeting "replies to" each other, but I mostly just get on there and post a snarky comment or two, and then I'm off. I just use it for myself, really, more than to dialogue with anyone. Of the big three (for me those are facebook, blogger and twitter) I use twitter the least - by a mile.

I haven't used twitter since earlier this year to announce my blog. Since then I don't have time to keep up with all of it(Blog, Facebook, my own writing, critiques.) so Twitter got left behind. So I completely understand where you are coming from Elana.

I'm glad you shared your thoughts. I've heard how it's a good tool for social networking but I barely have time to read my blogs so haven't signed up for it yet. As it is, sometimes I feel bad that my blog comments are almost always at the end because I'm at work when everyone blogs. There's no way I could keep up a twitter conversation in the day. Thanks for making me not feel so bad.

First of all, look at this blog - you have darn near 100 comments on this post (and most of your posts actually). You are so far from being a loser it's not even funny. You are awesomeness darlin :)

Having said that, I totally agree with Twitter. Mostly because I just don't get it, like, at all. I have no idea what all the # and @ thingys are, I have no idea how to do them or how to talk to anyone or how to find out if anyone is talking to me. I occasionally post, like once every month or three, but for the most part, I don't bother with it.

I'm starting to feel the same way about FB now that it's got its new format. I used to jump on for a quick look at what is going on with everyone. Now it only shows a sampling here and there, and frankly, it rarely shows the people I really want to know about. So, yeah. I'll stick with my blog for now :)

Okay, I'll admit I've never tried it, but only because I feared I'd feel EXACTLY the way you described!! I mean, I've earned every year of my age and I'll be darned if I have to live through the I'm-a-teen-dork-loser thing again.

Plus, I'm kind of a hermit at heart. I want to read blogs because usually the writer has something to say...Twitter? not so much. I don't really care too much if someone is shopping or just ate a great cupcake....

This is fantastic! I thought I was the only one who isn't in love with Twitter. I hate the pressure to convince people of my unmatched wit in 140 characters. If you gave me 140 *pages*, I still don't think I could manage it.

I understand your pain. I'm a Twitter twit who can't figure out how to tweet. Just can't get the hang of it. I have two Twitter accounts, one personal, one public and I can't keep up with either. Not only do I feel like a loser, I feel like some kind of a Luddite for shunning progress. Give me blogging any day.

My problem with Twitter is that I still don't really get it (after 5 months too, which is embarrassing). I've gotten to know a few people, but it seems like even getting to know all my "friends" would be impossible.

I like blogging, because it's so much deeper than a 2 second conversation. I think you've inspired me to become a twitter lurker and stop worrying so much about trying to make it work. :)

You really hit a note with folks today! I completely agree with you about Twitter. It's like hanging out with the "mean girls" and not understanding the code. Sigh.Thanks for bein' honest, apparently you are SO not alone!

Even though you're not a Twitter fan, I still <3 you. ;) I guess being on the outside of all those conversations doesn't bother me so much. I love all the information I get, and the laughs. In order to participate in the conversations you'd have to be on Twitter *all day long* and there are some people who are. I pop in a few times a day, take a look around, and then leave.

I got on Twitter months ago and I so completely don't understand it so I'm with you on feeling like the dumb kid in the corner. I wanted it because of the writing chats and that so many agents and writers are on there, but I can't figure it out! I love Facebook and blogging, and I get so envious on FB when someone says "go check out such and such @blahblah on Twitter" and I'm like.... "what???"

I don't understand a lot of the twitter convos/functions. It is really useful for me as book reviewer. I'm able to put when I post a review, which has gained more interest in my blog. It's easier to keep up with publishers, and I include them in the tweet with my review. I only joined so I could do that. I chat with a few people, and I'm getting more contact with fellow book review bloggers in the UK and also authors (its really nice to be in touch with people on my home turf).

I like Twitter, but yes, feel that I'm an outsider in many conversations. I add my own thoughts to the pipeline, but mostly feel wallflower-ish. But then again, I'm still a young pup in the writing world.

Hi, I just found your blog by way of another blog post so I'm already feeling left out of the conversation, but I did JUST join twitter this month and I actually kind of like it. I know, but I do! I have app on my phone and my laptop though that make it easy to use. But, I have noticed that SOME friends don't tweet back or are exclusive in who they tweet so I think I know what you are referring to and for that I totally understand and I say close out of the conversation at that point if it is no longer enjoyable. What I do like about it is those that are willing to converse with "everyone" especially when it comes to authors, writers, artists, etc. to share in mutual interests and conversations and for that it is really fun and good for networking. I have noticed that some "friend" people when they aren't really interested in tweeting at all. :) I am still learning how it all works as it has just been a couple of weeks, but that has been my experience so far. It does seem really nice to be able to add links in it as well.

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