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5 Ways To Make a Killer First Impression

Most people will judge you within the first second of meeting you and their opinion will most likely never change. Making a good first impression is incredibly important, because you only get one shot at it.

Princeton University psychologist Alex Todorov and co-author Janine Willis, a student researcher who graduated from Princeton in 2005 had people look at a microsecond of video of a political candidate. Amazingly, research subjects could predict with 70-percent accuracy who would win the electionjust from that microsecond of tape.This tells us that people can makeincredibly accurate snap judgments in a tenth of a second.

How can you ensure people are judging you accurately and also seeing your best side? You never want to give people an inauthentic impression — many people can intuitively feel if someone is being fake immediately. However, any time you meet someone for the first time, you always want to start on the right foot. Here are a few ways you can make sure people’s first impression of you is a good one:

1.Set an intention. The most important thing to do for giving a good impression is to set your intention. This is especially important before any kind of big event where you would be meeting a lot of people — i.e. conferences, networking events or friend’s parties. As you get ready or when you are driving over think about what kind of people you want to meet and what kind of interactions you want to have. This can be an incredibly grounding experience and works very well to focus on what kind of energy you want to have for your event.

2. Think about your ornaments. Clothes, make-up, jewelry, watches and shoes are all types of ornamentation and people definitely take these into account when making initial judgments. I highly recommend getting some of your favorite outfits or ornaments together and asking friends you trust what they think of when they see them. For many men, they do not realize that their watch can say a lot about them. For women, purses and large earrings or jewelry can also indicate a lot to a new person they are meeting. Make sure that what you are wearing and how you do your hair or make-up says what you want it to say to the people you are meeting for the first time.

3. Be Conscious of Your Body Language. Body language is a crucial part of first impressions. Everything from your posture to how you carry yourself to the way you’re angling your body. Often, simply being aware of your body language can result in immediate improvements. Another way to examine your body language is to look at yourself on a video walking around a room. Subconscious cues to keep in mind include noticing where you point your feet, the position of your shoulders, and the way you shake hands.

4. Avoid bad days. People who go to cocktail events or mixers after having had a bad day typically continue to have a bad day. If you are in a depressed or anxious mood, others will pick up on this from your facial expressions, comments and body language. If you’re having a bad day, stay home! Otherwise, find a way to snap yourself out of your bad mood. I find working out or watching funny YouTube videos before events often gets me in a more social, feel good mood.

5. Be interested and interesting. If you are truly interested in meeting people and are open to learning about who they are, they will get this in a first impression. We have all had the experience of meeting someone and knowing instantly that they were dragged here by a friend and are just waiting to get out the door and head home. When you are meeting people for the first time approach others with a genuine interest in who they are. This is often contagious and you will have better conversations and lasting connections when you are interested because they become interested.

Vanessa Van Petten specializes in social and emotional intelligence research and development. She is the CEO of Science of People, focusing on research youth behavior and help adults keep up with young adults. Her company not only reaches out to families, but also works with brands and individuals to help them use social and emotional intelligence to improve website traffic, sales and branding.

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“Mother was always right!” She said, to be ‘interesting’ you must BE interesting. Remembering that is is not about YOU, rather what you can do or how you can be of benefit to the other person not only takes the pressure off of you to perform but allows you to show your true self.

Bring them up to your eyes as quickly as possible so you can connect on an emotional level. No bling, no skin and certainly no sloppy clothes.. Showing up ready is the key! Who was it that said, “When opportunity knocks, it’s too late to prepare….”

In today’s world, the first impression may be made online. Chances are that people will Google “your name” even before you meet face to face or they ask for a formal introduction. Therefore, it’s important to control what people see about you and to publish the information you want to share, rather than rely on what others say about you to make a first impression. Much networking is conducted in the virtual world today. Your online persona shapes the perception new contacts have of you both in real life and through a virtual connection. Debra Feldman, JobWhiz.com, Executive Talent Agent

A truly trivial article that begins by citing a micro-study (reaction to political candidates in some period of ‘microseconds’) and then uses that as a basis for a series of unwarranted generalizations.

The author needs to go back, perhaps, and read Goleman’s “Emotional Intelligence,” and “Social Intelligence” books again to grasp the deeper dimensions of social recognition, typing, and categorization and its relation to social context, norms, and even … mores.

The article is a ‘short course’ on manipulation of the external image of the person, but in ‘real life,’ depending on the social context, we respond instantly to the presence of, or absence of, ‘spontaneity,’ and/or the relative ‘flatness’ or ‘richness’ of affect and mood revealed by the play of facial expression, eye movement, etc.

Wit and humor, irony and sarcasm, flippancy, and gravitas all come into play. But, so much depends on the ‘play:’ the actors, the stage, the lighting, the audience.

This writer once got a lucrative contract as a programmer by posing as a literarily dumb and socially awkward ‘geek.’ But, they didn’t terminate me when they found out, later, that I could quote Milton, Blake, and Whitman, from memory.

Irony about first impressions: “She is the CEO of Science of People, focusing on research youth behavior and help adults keep up with young adults.” If your first impression is through media, maybe do a quick proofread?

If appearance and split second impression carry so much weight, instead of playing the game, the first order of business should be to break out of the game. How much is appearance impacting our decisions negatively in terms of who we hire, who we invest in, and who we listen to?

What are the opportunities lost because the great ideas from the unattractive woman or guy at the table are beat out by lessor ones from the mouths of those that better look the part?

This post inspired me to blog on the subject http://clairification.blogspot.com/2011/12/you-and-your-donors-are-dating-first.html as it relates to nonprofits. All these rules apply, and we really need to be dating our donors. Thanks!

I did all these things today when I went to introduce myself to the hiring manager of a place where I had filled out an online application. Before I left I set my intention(to put a face with the name on the application) Afterwards I felt like I had made a good impression. Even tho I did not get a job offer knowing that I made a good impression made me feel empowered

When you speak about being interested, and interesting, I have found that a key is to try to make a connection with the people you are meeting. Try to ask questions that might reveal similarities. For example, if you ask where someone attended college or where they grew up, maybe you know people in common. You can talk about travel, restaurants, exercise, where you live…in short, anything that might help you make a direct, and memorable connection.