Life 101

Sharing my learning for this week.

I'm not sure how many times I have heard the phrase "Do the thing and get the energy to do the thing" but it is a lot.

So...my experience to date is that life is not predictable, there is no instruction book, no stop, start or pause buttons it just comes before us and we choose how we act. It is up to us to determine our focus the direction we take and the pace that we choose to move.

The key thing is to take action in line with our focus, doing this creates a re-action around us that is congruent with our focus, this in turn exposes us to opportunity, choice, motivation and energy! If we keep repeating the above we gain momentum and the sustained energy to keep doing what we wish to do.

As we move through life we will make mistakes, stumble, fall and at some stage experience life changing events, usually after substantial change we can get thrown of course, we loose our rhythm or direction. It is at this stage that we need to take time to recover, not judge ourselves, allow ourselves to accept the experience and the learning then re-focus and begin to take action again! Without fail we will then start to experience the energy again to do the thing that we wish to do. -

How many of us take the leap of faith and make some kind of change in our life... We talk ourselves into a belief that we cannot change and that it is hard, when the reality is that it is just a decision and that decision brings something new into our lives. The great news is it is easy and when you trust yourself and get clear about what it is you are seeking it brings great new experiences and opens many doors that were not options before. Stay tuned to hear about what has changed here.

FEAR!! we've all experienced it, that unique state, heart thumping, ultra alert, deep breathing, tense... Ready for whatever threat is about to challenge our world. All we have to survive is within, thanks to fear we are now in a state that will give us our best chance of survival. We're running potential sequences, doing our best to estimate what may happen so that we may take evasive action, right!! Fear is a good thing, Yeh...

Now... Change the scene... We're actually safe, no life threatening circumstances, just doing our stuff, just wanting to create the life we want... We've done the hard yards doing all the things that we know we can handle, then... When we need to do that thing that we haven't done before, that thing that can give us big results, life changing results...

What the!!! FEAR's back, heart thumping, ultra alert, deep breathing, tense... It's all there!! Before we know it we're doing what fear does best, running potential sequences, estimating what may happen, all to protect ourselves from outcomes that we have dreamt up. They're not actually real, because remember, we're safe, it's not life threatening, it's just different to what we are used to!

See, the beautiful thing about our fear's is that when we are in that state, we are super strong, we are in the perfect condition to handle whatever it is that we are contemplating, the skill is to be comfortable with this and know that you are in a heightened state that enables you to perform at a greater level. We can use the imaginary scenarios that we dream up as preparedness and therefore be in the best state we can be. So why not "Own your Fear's"

Be yourselfI wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.This is the most common regret she heard from palliative care patients, says Ms Ware.She says when people are facing death, most people claimed they had not honoured even half their dreams, on account of choices they’d made or not made.She says as soon as a person’s health fails, so too does your freedom, so get cracking on what you want to achieve before it is too late.All work and no playI wish I didn’t work so hard.With most of her patients hailed from a generation in which men were typically the breadwinners. Ware says she heard this regret from every single man she nursed.She says they felt like they’d missed out on watching their kids grow up and on the companionship of their partners.This prompted Ware’s decision to simplify her lifestyle to not need as much money as before, and to create more space in her life.

Remember your friendsI wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.Perhaps the most famous ‘friends’ the world has known.According to Ms Ware, many of her patients only realised the importance of their old friends in their final weeks.She says they’d become so caught up in their own lives they stopped keeping track of the lives of their old friends, and in those final moments often had difficulty tracking them down. She says not giving friendships enough time and effort was one of the deepest regrets people would carry with them to the grave.She says that in the final weeks, love and friendship is all that matters.

Why so serious?All we really want is to smile more.I wish that I had let myself be happier.Ware says she found this one surprising. She says people felt they’d allowed themselves to stick with familiar patterns, fearing change and pretending to themselves and others that they were happy as is.She says deep down they wanted to laugh properly and have silliness in their lives, and that on their deathbeds, that is exactly what they would do – she recommends doing so long before that time comes.Speak your mindI wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.Ware says a large number of her patients suppressed their feelings to keep others happy, and ended up feeling bitter and resentful towards those people they were trying to please.She says she learned it is important to be honest to others, which will either raise the relationship to a new level or erase an unhealthy relationship from one’s life.

RISE and shine! Morning time just became your new best friend. Love it or hate it, utilising the morning hours before work may be the key to a successful and healthy lifestyle.That’s right, early rising is a common trait found in many CEOs, government officials, and other influential people. Margaret Thatcher was up every day at 5am; Frank Lloyd Wright at 4am and Robert Iger, the CEO of Disney wakes at 4.30am just to name a few.

I know what you’re thinking – you do your best work at night. Not so fast. According to Inc. Magazine, morning people have been found to be more proactive and more productive. In addition, the health benefits for those with a life before work go on and on.

Let’s explore 5 of the things successful people do before 8am.

1. Exercise. I’ve said it once, I’ll say it again. Most people that work out daily, work out in the morning. Whether it’s a morning yoga session or a trip to the gym, exercising before work gives you a boost of energy for the day and that deserved sense of accomplishment. Anyone can tackle a pile of paperwork after 200 ab reps! Morning workouts also eliminate the possibility of flaking out on your cardio after a long day at work. Even if you aren’t bright eyed and bushy tailed at the thought of a 5am jog, try waking up 15 minutes early for a quick bedside set of pushups or stretching. It’ll help wake up your body, and prep you for your day.

2. Map Out Your Day. Maximise your potential by mapping out your schedule for the day, as well as your goals and to dos. The morning is a good time for this as it is often one of the only quiet times a person gets throughout the day. The early hours foster easier reflection that helps when prioritising your activities. They also allow for uninterrupted problem solving when trying to fit everything into your timetable. While scheduling, don’t forget about your mental health. Plan a 10 minute break after that stressful meeting for a quick walk around the block or a moment of meditation at your desk. Trying to eat healthy? Schedule a small window in the evening to pack a few nutritious snacks to bring to work the next day.

3. Eat a Healthy Breakfast. We all know that rush out the door with a cup of coffee and an empty stomach feeling. You sit down at your desk, and you’re already wondering how early that taco truck sets up camp outside your office. No good. Take that extra time in the morning to fuel your body for the tasks ahead of it. It will help keep your mind on what’s at hand and not your growling stomach. Not only is breakfast good for your physical health, it is also a good time to connect socially. Even five minutes of talking with your kids or spouse while eating a quick bowl of oatmeal can boost your spirits before heading out the door.

4. Visualisation. These days we talk about our physical health ad nauseam, but sometimes our mental health gets overlooked. The morning is the perfect time to spend some quiet time inside your mind meditating or visualising. Take a moment to visualise your day ahead of you, focusing on the successes you will have. Even just a minute of visualisation and positive thinking can help improve your mood and outlook on your work load for the day.

5. Make Your Day Top Heavy. We all have that one item on our to do list that we dread. It looms over you all day (or week) until you finally suck it up and do it after much procrastination. Here’s an easy tip to save yourself the stress – do that least desirable task on your list first. Instead of anticipating the unpleasantness of it from first coffee through your lunch break, get it out of the way. The morning is the time when you are (generally) more well rested and your energy level is up. Therefore, you are more well equipped to handle more difficult projects. And look at it this way, your day will get progressively easier, not the other way around. By the time your work day is ending, you’re winding down with easier to dos and heading into your free time more relaxed. Success!

It would have been better coming from one of your close friends, but since they didn’t do it, I guess it falls on me.

You see, you have a number of nasty habits that are keeping you from being the successful business owner you always thought you would be. And it’s ok; I don’t blame you. We all fall into these ruts, and can use a good kick in the pants from time to time.

So consider this YOUR kick in the pants.

Here are 7 reasons you won’t ever be successful (and how you can prove me wrong).

1. You Spend Too Much Time on Facebook.

I know you need to be on Facebook for your business; we all do. The problem is that you’re not using it for business; you’re mindlessly thumbing through updates that make no difference to your life, falling victim to one of the biggest time sucks known to man.

But of course I’m not just talking about Facebook here…you know your social network of choice. It doesn’t matter whether it’s Twitter, Instagram, Vine or even MySpace (you know who you are).

According to research by Social Media Examiner, 62% of marketers are on social media for 6 hours or more per week, and a whopping 17% are on more than 20 hours per week.

And in case you’re saying, ‘but I’m not a marketer!’ Well, you’re not off the hook. Other research shows that the average American user spends 3+ hours on social networking each day.

That’s a lot of time you’re never going to get back.

2. You Think You’re Working Hard. But You Aren’t.

I’m really proud of you for putting in your 8-10 hours a day! I really am. The problem is that breaks, interruptions and distractions are actually eating away a HUGE chunk of your day. Way more than you even realize.

Have you ever used Rescue Time to measure how productive your day actually is? This software program measures the amount of time you spend in each software program throughout your day. It’s easy to think you’re working hard, but if you actually track how and where you’re spending your time online, you may be surprised at what gets revealed.

Is there something you dream of doing one day? Maybe a side business you’ve been working on here or there?

What do you do when the workday ends? Do you spend your evenings on the couch watching TV? That’s time you could be spending working on your business idea, side project or personal brand that could one day become your full-time job.

If you have a dream, invest your most valuable personal asset – your time – and that dream could come to fruition way sooner than you ever thought possible.

3. You Aren’t Efficient.

Okay, so you’re telling me you do track your time, and it appears you’re working harder than I originally thought. Your time tracking software seems to indicate that you’re making good use of your time, and not letting distractions make too much of a dent in your workday. Well done!

But – and I hate to have to tell you this – you could be doing much better. Yes, you’re working hard, but there are ways your hard work can be even more productive. You know the saying: It’s not just about working harder, it’s about working smarter.

Welcome to the life of an entrepreneur. In the words of Newt Gingrich, “Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did”.

True entrepreneurs work hard, and don’t give up when things don’t go their way. They keep working, they keep trying, they keep banging their heads against the wall until they break through, if they have to.

YOU are a true entrepreneur! You can do this!

5. You Can’t Imagine Payoff Years From Now for Work That You do Today.

Tasks that you can complete in a day or two, and that have immediate payoff are AWESOME. Addictive, even.

But every successful entrepreneur knows that in order to build something strong and sustainable, you have to invest time now; and the results often don’t manifest themselves for years.

If you can’t deal with that, you simply aren’t thinking long-term enough. If you can only think about short-term rewards like what your next paycheck will look like because of work you did this week, it’s time to reevaluate your goals.

Some of what you do will have short-term results, but much of building a sustainable business is doing grunt work now, and reaping the rewards far off in the future.

6. You Aren’t Taking Risks.

I get it. It feels way better not to stick your neck out and do stuff that you could fail at. Playing it safe is warm, cozy and comfortable.

But, (you know what I’m going to say here, right?), there are no rewards without risk. I suppose it’s possible that some good things can happen without risk, but how often is a business built on pure luck? On things being handed to you on a silver platter?

Taking risks is part of the job description, and while failing doesn’t feel very good, you know what does? Failing, failing, failing, and then suddenly, SUCCESS. Now you don’t feel so bad about your failures, because you see that it was only through the failures that you learned the right way to succeed.

7. You Don’t Take Opportunities.

Finally, dear business owner, it’s not just about not taking enough risks. Strangely enough, taking opportunities can also be difficult. And it’s not just because opportunities come disguised as risk.

Have you seen the movie ‘Yes Man’? The main character, Carl Allen (played by Jim Carrey), decides to escape the loneliness and humdrum-ness of his life by simply saying ‘yes’ to every opportunity that comes his way – even simple ones.

Once he starts saying yes, amazing things start happening to him. Things he couldn’t have imagined. And all because he simply said, ‘yes’!

I’m not saying you need to run yourself ragged saying yes to everyone and everything that comes your way. What I am saying is sometimes the greatest rewards come from saying yes to opportunities that may be slightly scary or uncomfortable.

Look for opportunities in unexpected places, and you just might be surprised at what you find.

I hope this didn’t come across as too harsh. I know you’re trying, and that you mean well.

I actually totally believe you can be successful; you just need to get a handle on these 7 bad habits.