Parenting is about so much more than diapers, bandaids, homework and curfews. Parenting is being there; listening, talking, forgiving, asking forgiveness and most of all, loving. I know this to be true because Momma D says it is.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

I wasn’t able to attend Mackenzie’s first soccer game of the
season a few weeks ago, so I called her that evening to see how it went. When
she came to the phone I asked, “How did your soccer games go today?” Without
missing a beat she replied, “I made a new friend!” She then proceeded to tell
me her new friend’s name and a few other pertinent details including that they
were both born in the month of July.

I can’t even begin to tell you how proud I am of Mackenzie
for her answer to my question because her answer revealed her true heart—a
heart that is more concerned about friendship and the socialization aspects of
being 8 and playing soccer than it is winning. To Mackenzie, being on a soccer
team is about making friends AND learning to play with her peers instead always being the winner and of
getting a head start on being in line for a college scholarship.

Parents, if reading this starts your head to nodding and has
you saying things like “That’s the way it should be” or “Good job, Mackenzie”,
keep up the great work!

If, on the other hand, reading this causes you to shake your
head, cringe, and say things like, “If she’s not going to play to win, she
shouldn’t even be playing”, or “I’m glad she’s not on my kid’s team”, then
shame on you.

First of all, having great social skills and caring more
about people than winning is something every parent should want for their kids.
Secondly, eight year-old sports teams shouldn’t really be about anything but learning how to be a team-player and
how to be a gracious winner and looser. And lastly, college should be the last
thing on your mind regarding your eight year-old. Enjoy your kids for who they are
now. Don’t miss their childhood by focusing on the future. Trust me when I say
that the time passes way to fast without trying to rush it.

The bottom line here is this: Friends are way more important
that winning a game of soccer…no matter how old you are. And as a parent, it’s
your job to let your kids know it’s perfectly okay for them to feel this way.
It’s also job for you to feel this way, too.

Love,

Momma D

Copyright 2016 Darla Noble. No part of this can be used or copied without permission from the author.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

If I had a dime for every time I’ve said one of the
following to my kids or grandkids, I’d be a very wealthy woman and I’m sure I
wouldn’t be alone because you’d be counting your dimes right along with me.

·Hold my hand—parking lots are dangerous

·You have to hold my hand so you don’t get lost

·If you let go of your balloon we won’t be able
to get it back

·Don’t drop that

·Make sure you hang on to your book bag so you
don’t lose it

·Hold on tight

As parents we’re all about making sure our kids have a good
grip on the tangible things they need to stay safe, have a good time, and learn
to be responsible. But what about giving them the emotional/mental/spiritual security
they need? Are we as concerned about giving them something to hold on to in that regard as we should be?

For the last few weeks I’ve been sharing with you some of
the life-lessons my children said they learned from me. This week’s lesson is
the last one I’ll be sharing, but it’s an important one, to be sure. The
lesson: The importance of giving your
children faith and values.

One of my daughters put it like this, “I loved the way we
all took turns praying at the table. It was a way for us to know we all need
Jesus.”

Another one of my daughters said, “You taught me how to
teach my daughter to know and love Jesus. You didn’t just tell us—you showed us
what it really means.”

Giving your children a set of values and a faith to hold on
to is important—even scientists and child psychologists agree on this one. Numerous
studies show that children whose parents raise them in a home where religion/faith and strong moral character is
both practiced and taught are decidedly more confident, possess better
social skills, and are overall, more likely to grow up to be law-abiding,
compassionate, responsible members of society.

We don’t hesitate to make sure we give our children the hand
they need to hold on to when they are too small to navigate parking lots,
shopping malls, grocery stores, and crosswalks by themselves, so why not finish
the job and make sure we give them what they need to safely navigate life in
general?

Love,

Momma D

Copyright 2016 Darla Noble. No part of this can be used or copied without permission from the author.

Monday, October 10, 2016

When asked what they had learned from me, all of the kids
had something to say in regards to learning to treat others the way you want to
be treated. As I thought about some of the ways I had tried to teach them this
lesson, many things came to mind, but one incident especially stands out in my
mind of how I exampled this attitude to Zach when he was a six year-old little
boy who was fiercely protective of his (then) two baby sisters…

Zach was six, Elizabeth was three and Olivia was just over a
year-old the day we walked into the grocery store and were ‘confronted’ by an
elderly woman who was well-known in our small town. Her name was “Virgie”, and
in addition to suffering from dementia, she was living in poverty, completely
alone, wandered around town all day long talking to whoever would give her a
minute or two of their day. On this particular day "Virgie" was living in the
part of her past that included small children. When she saw Olivia in the cart,
she took her out quicker than I could bat an eye, and began to pat her back and rock her gently back and forth
saying, “You’re my sweet baby. Isn’t my baby sweet?” while I was tying
Elizabeth’s shoe.

It took only a second for me to realize Olivia wasn’t scared
and that Virgie wasn’t going anywhere. In fact, Olivia was completely
unaffected, but nevertheless, I quickly and gently proceeded to take Olivia
back while agreeing with “Virgie” that yes, she was a sweet and beautiful baby.
Zach, on the other hand, was not nearly as calm or forgiving of the intrusion.

“She’s not your baby, she’s our baby,” he repeated two or
three times. “Tell her, Mom, Olivia is our baby. She needs to give her back.”

The whole incident lasted no more than a couple of minutes, but
it was time enough to provide a HUGE ‘teachable moment’ and I didn’t want to mess it up. So
once Olivia was back in my arms, I moved the kids away from "Virgie" and
reassured them that I wouldn’t have ever
allowed her to hurt Olivia. I told them I knew she wasn’t going to because she
really did think Olivia was her baby. Elizabeth accepted my words without much comment,
but when I asked Zach if he understood, he said something to the effect of “You
didn’t want to hurt that lady’s feelings because that's not nice and because you didn’t want her to hurt
Olivia.”

Yes, that was pretty much it. In not lashing out at "Virgie" I
taught my young son that no one is
undeserving of being treated the way we want to be treated. Or in this case,
the way I wanted my loved one to be treated.

I knew “Virgie” was harmless and that she posed no risk to
my daughter, so by not ‘going off’ on her that day I was able to give her
a brief moment of the joy of memories past AND teach the kids what kindness to
strangers looks like. I know this isn’t always the case—that we most definitely
need to teach our children the whole stranger-danger ‘thing’. But I also know
that equally important is our job to be consciously and deliberately teaching
our children that everyone deserves to be respected and treated the way we want
to be treated…even people who are different from us, because we never know when
extending that kind of kindness might be the brightest spot in their day.

Love,

Momma D

Copyright 2016 Darla Noble. No part of this can be used or copied without permission from the author.

About Me

Hi! Thanks for stopping by. As an author/writer, I spend much of my time putting words on paper (both the real and virtual kind) in hopes that you will read them...be encouraged by them...and become a better person for having read what I write.

Nonfiction is generally my 'gig' and storytelling is how I do it best. When you read what I write you will feel as if you are talking with a trusted friend.

In addition to writing my own 'stuff', I offer reasonable freelancing and ghostwriting services. The work is top-notch and the rates are as reasonable as they come.

I am also available for speaking/teaching at Christian women's and/or teen events, retreats, camps and so on. Hey, what can I say...I like talking about Jesus!