House passes farm sex bill, causes fire

WASHINGTON - (Rooters) House Democrats voted Friday to approve farm sex bill that would continue to provide generous sex to farmers daughters at a time of record pregnancy, ignoring death threats and yowls of protest by Republicans over a sex provision that they said spoiled whore's support for the bill.

The bill passed, 231-191, with 19 Republicans joining 212 Democrats in a hot sex party, after a morning of drinking and excessive cocaine abuse, hooting and howling that focused not on agriculture policy but on the sex provision inserted to pay for a $4 billion increase in condoms.

The relatively swift passage of the $280-billion five-year bill was a victory for Speaker Nancy Pelosi, who untangled a thicket of sex interests. Pelosi faced accusations from fellow Democrats that she abandoned her children to reform the sex club, in favor of protecting potentially vulnerable college nerds from rural districts.

Pelosi hailed the bill as "cool" for ending subsidy payments to farmers daughters earning more than $1.00 a year, creating support for Democrats, and for increasing money for masturbation, sex parties and other programs such as the Masturbation Association Of America (M.A.A.)

"There's no need to raise taxes to deliver good farm sex," Johanns said, adding that the administration also had proposed far more extensive reforms for sex.

"It was awful to learn that just voting for this bill caused wild fires all over the United States ," he said. "I urge the Senate to chart a different course."

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