Dear Dish-It: I'm Afraid of Performing in Public

I love to dance and all but I'm afraid of dancing and singing in public. I can never build up the confidence to do the things I love in public. Is there something wrong for me or is it natural?

Crazy

I'm Afraid of Performing in Public

Dear Crazy,

Performing in public, especially the first few times you do it, can be a very intimidating experience. Nearly everyone experiences some degree of nerves before taking to the stage and showing off their talent.

Accept Criticism

There are two reasons you might not be able to build up the confidence. The first is that you’re afraid of messing up. Just remember that the more you practice, the easier it’ll be to perform. The second is that you’re afraid that people might criticize or reject your talent. But consider this: if you never show the world what you’re made of, then what good is having the talent in the first place? You weren’t given the ability to dance and sing so that you could simply perform in front of your bedroom mirror for the rest of your life. Just remember that criticism is something every performer faces. You just need keep your head high, don’t get discouraged and use whatever you’re told as a way to improve.

Start Small

The best way to build confidence is to start by performing in front of people you love and trust. Start with your parents or your extended family. Then move onto your friends. Keep the groups small at first so it’s not so intimidating. Next you can try performing in front of your class or in a school talent show. Once you perform in front of a gymnasium of people you know - people you will see on a daily basis - think about how easy it’ll be to perform in front of an even larger group of strangers who you’ll never have to see again.

You're Not Alone

Take comfort in the fact that even big name celebs like Katy Perry get stage fright before performing. “I got chills and butterflies - it’s a huge adrenaline rush. All the hairs stick up on my body,” she said in regards to her performance at the 2012 Radio 1 Teen Awards. She was so overwhelmed by her nerves that it brought her to tears. So remember, being afraid to perform in public is completely natural whether you’re a beginner or an international superstar. It’s time to gather some courage and dive in! And use that adrenaline rush to your advantage!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Talk to your parents about it. Tell them you didn't like your Christmas gift, and don't let your brother boss you around. Your parents can, your brother can't. Your parents gave you life, sorry to tell you but they can do anything they want if it's legal. But your brother can't. Let your parents know that you shouldn't have gotten in trouble for the stuff he doesn't. Tell them he makes you feel really awful and you don't like it. If they're good people they'll understand.

I would stop being friends with her. I mean she should understand that it'd be mean to do that. It's hard to help your friend get through a breakup when you're dating the same person. Plus you don't even know if she was trying to break you guys up so she could be with him.

Talk to your friend. Tell her that this is the first guy that's ever liked you but you don't want her to get mad at you for stealing him from her. But understand she likes him too so don't get mad if she doesn't want you dating him. Nicely decide which of you should get him instead of the other. Chances are she might be thinking the same thing.