Thanks again for so many replies. Its definitely echoed my thoughts on the fact this guy is hookey.

Spoke to friend again and showed her the many responses. She is happy to clarify a few things.

1. Seeing my OP, with the situation written out so plainly, she says its a lot more obvious that he was being odd, and it wasn't just her being over sensitive. Its thrown her rather than worried her.

2. The drink was a medium diet coke, they don't do refills in British cinemas as far as we are aware.

3. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. To all those people that said you SHOULD have said this, yup she knows that now. Friend is back on the dating game after a long time, and has in the past been accused of being a bit too forward and pushy - (this was a works criticism) and with this in the back of her mind she says it was a first date and she wanted to make a good impression, so was more reserved than perhaps usual. By the third incident, she was indeed thinking "that the heck?".

4. The "Leave it" bit. I think this was the bit that threw her the most. She says he had already stepped out of the seat and was putting his coat on in the aisle. She was stood in front of her seat still, and then turned her back to him to pick up the popcorn, when she heard him say in an exasperated voice (not bellowing as has been suggested) "Just leeave it!" in a hurried sighing type way. She said it sounded like the way you might address a child!

At this point she said she is bit shocked, but when she turned BACK around to face him, his face and demeanor, friendly and smiling at her was totally different, like he hadn't said anything at all (she knew it MUST have been him, but it threw her enough to not to say "wait what the heck did you just say to me, Chuckles?"). She said she was thinking it, but it made her second guess herself just long enough for it to then feel weird walking out to the cars to say anything. By then, it was pretty late, she had work in the morning and just wanted to get home rather than stand in a car park and discuss it, and then the next day he was continuing with the funny, fun happy guy routine again.

If anything, its left her confused about the whole thing, as she was pretty darn sure he was being an oddball, but then his instant demeanor would change to happy, funny guy again.

Now she is one tough gal though and hasn't taken any of this to heart, She is going to go tonight after the gym for a planned chickeny dinner and a few drinks, she has a get out clause (she can call me or her housemate if there's a problem - though I doubt she won't be able to handle herself).

As this incident has also become a bit of a joke to us all too, I dont think she is taking the thought of them dating full term seriously since the popcorn incident last week, and in her words, although he is really funny on line, she is full on wary of this guy and waaay suspicious. She said she is almost going with a morbid curiously to see if he pulls anything again, especially as she is looking forward to eating in front of him tonight, and she says she is going to order an extra portion of something to see what he does . I think when they are in the middle of a Nandos she is not going to be worried about keeping quiet this time. Gah I wanna be a fly on the wall for this one!!

I lost a friend to actions similar to this. On his second date with a girl she reached into his pockets took out his cigarettes and said "I don't loike people smoking around me." Crushed them and threw them away. My response would have been to leave her where they were, his was to continue dating her. She pulled a ton of other control games like that, even worse after he married her. When those games started to effect my wife (she would RSVP to things and then call sick at the last moment so much it became a joke) when she pulled a stunt for a party that was planned entirely for her we cut them off. Oddly enough he hasn't ever tried to contact any of our group of friends since then, she decided he needed to make new friends so thats what he did.

So did she leave it or pick it up and keep it? I'm wondering if he was all happy and smiles again because she did as commanded or because he realized he'd been ridiculous/possibly come off like a jerk and was attempting to smooth it over.

I remember going back into the dating pool after dating Mistake for many years. I so wanted it to work out that I told myself and him that I felt a connection. I didn't. I think there might have been a little of that going on for the OP's friend.

...she is looking forward to eating in front of him tonight, and she says she is going to order an extra portion of something to see what he does . I think when they are in the middle of a Nandos she is not going to be worried about keeping quiet this time. Gah I wanna be a fly on the wall for this one!!

I think you need to show up at Nandos with your video camera and sit a few tables away. For the safety of your friend and for the study of Science/Psychology. And to provide us with full details.