Lovehoney USB Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand – Sex Toy Review

Guys, I’m going to have to devote an entire room of my house to just vibrating wands. Seriously, I’m out of control. CAN’T STOP, WON’T STOP! Good wands, bad wands, GIVE ME ALL THE WANDS!

So just what wand have I got my paws on now? Why, the Lovehoney USB Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand of course!

First off, I’d like to note that the Lovehoney wand has been extreme weather tested and has survived. It sat in my mailbox for two days in -22 degree fahrenheit weather, I honestly didn’t expect it to work after that. I mean, my car wouldn’t even start during those two days, so why should my budget priced wand? Color me pleasantly surprised when it roared to life right out of the packaging… well, okay, maybe not so much ‘roared’ as ‘buzzed’ to life. So if nothing else, the Lovehoney USB Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand is hardy!

Right off the bat this wand gets a thumbs up from me, Lovehoney lists the material as being silicone, which I feel like is somewhat uncommon for wand heads. Or I just have particularly bad luck when picking out vibrating wands… (*cough* Bodywand Mini Massager *cough*) I feel like I say this a lot, and I don’t mean to be a nag, but remember to avoid using silicone based lubes with the Lovehoney Mini Massage Wand, because it may damage your awesomely silicone wand head! When it comes to cleaning the wan, pay extra attention to those stupid itty-bitty ridges that wrap around the head, gunk likes to collect in those ridges – a good brush with a toothbrush makes quick work of those ridges. The rest of the toy is made from ABS plastic, which you can wipe down as needed. It is not waterproof, so don’t submerge it or run it under water.

Like the name suggests, the Lovehoney wand is rechargeable, and again, as the name suggests it charges via a USB cable (which is included). All you need to do is plug the cable into the round port at the very bottom of the wand and the other end into any computer USB port, easy enough. Normally, this is the part of the review where I would complain about a toy not having a wall charger… but, I had a thought the other day when my Bodywand Wand Plus G Spot wand arrived from Australia. So, mistakenly my wand was sent to me with an Australian plug… which obviously is not going to work in my U.S. outlets… so I had to buy an adapter, pain in the butt! Well, as I was waiting for my adaptor to arrive I thought… man, if only this charged via USB… and BAM it hit me. Even though I royally complain about USB toys not coming with a wall charger, it makes them something that can be charged globally! a USB is a USB is a USB no matter where in the world your computer is located! I mean… I still wish it came with its own wall plug, I’m running out of available iPhone cubes to charge sex toys with. It takes about 90 minutes to charge the Lovehoney Mini Massage Wand to full power and that will net you about 50 some minutes of playtime with it. Not bad. There is no light to indicate whether your wand has reached full charge or not, so you just kind of have to watch the clock and guess.

Operating the Lovehoney USB Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand Vibrator is super easy (easier than typing out this toys ridiculously long name!). The whole thing is operated using a scroll wheel on the body of the wand. Scroll the wheel downwards to turn the toy on and to increase its intensity and scroll the wheel upwards to lower the intensity and to turn the wand off. It is hard to tell just how many intensity settings the toy actually has, they all blend pretty seamlessly into each other, but it feels like you’ve got at least a few options. I always crank every toy up to its highest setting and call it good, I’m addicted to power. The vibrations at the lower end do seem to be much deeper and rumblier (is that even a word?) than its upper end vibrations, which get buzzier as the speed increases.

The wand isn’t quite as Mini as the Bodywand Mini Massager, but it is definitely still discreet and easily portable. It’s total length measures in at 8 inches and the handle is pretty slim and easy to hold, measuring in at 4.5 inches around at its widest point. It’s a nice size, small enough to toss in a bag for travel or to hide easily in a bedside table or dresser drawer (if hiding your sex toys is your thing. Me… you can’t walk two feet without tripping over a vibrator. I stubbed my toe on a Bodywand last night.)

The head of the Lovehoney wand is just large enough that it doesn’t exactly give me pin-point stimulation, but it doesn’t really cover a super broad area either (like the Doxy does), so I’m kind of on the fence about whether I like that or not, like I would prefer it to either be just a little bit bigger or just a little bit smaller. The neck is also pretty flexible, but not crazy bendy, it makes finding a good angle pretty easy. In use I needed to use a lot of pressure to get the vibrations deep enough to do me any good, but I am happy to report that I did orgasm easily using the wand, so it isn’t useless. I could see myself throwing this into an overnight bag, when packing my Hitachi or Doxy might seem like overkill.

My Stunt Cock is the opposite of myself, he does not like powerful vibrations. I can make him jump about 10 feet in the air if I sneak up on him with the Doxy or Hitachi. But he did not find the Lovehoney Mini Massager’s vibrations completely objectionable. The wand is just about the right size for easily running over the head of the penis, around the balls, and over the taint… That sounds like a great beginning to a perverted children’s song… ‘Over the head and around the balls to his taint we go…the wand knows the way to carry the–‘ no, no, I’m going to stop there, I’m getting off track. What I’m trying to say is that if you are a person who prefers gentler vibrations, this wand seems to falls in to that category.

Do I recommend the Lovehoney USB Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand Vibrator? Well, I really appreciate that the Lovehoney wand is cordless. I don’t always like being a slave to an outlet when the urge to masturbate arises. And, for example, my bed is pretty tall and the cord to my Hitachi pretty small, which causes problems. So, any time I find a wand that is cordless, I’m in. Because of its size, you can’t really expect to get a deep rumble out of this wand, but I was surprised that on its lower setting there actually was some rumble, the higher speeds do get buzzy, but not horsefly in my pants, my vulva is going numb, kind of buzzy. It’s the tolerable kind of buzzy. Because I have successfully orgasmed with the Lovehoney wand a few times now, I’m going to give this toy a solid 7/10 – would masturbate with it again. So yes, if you prefer gentle to moderate vibrations, or are looking for something more budget friendly and portable, the Lovehoney Mini Massage Wand is a good choice. And like I said before, it gets bonus points in my book for having a silicone head.

-1 Comment-

I used to do a lot of my shopping at Lovehoney, and I’d see ads for this wand all the time. I already had the MWR so I didn’t feel the need to get another wand, but the lightweightness of this really appeals to me, as does the scroll wheel. I like that you’d be able to go up in intensity more gradually. But I’d also imagine that if you were in the mood for a specific setting it’d be hard to get it just right.