Just the fact that you are a member of this community shows how committed you are to doing the very best you can for your daughter and for yourself. Please email or pm me or anyone else on this thread who has offered if you need to talk.

Annette

Flowers, fairies, gardens, and rainbows-- To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.: 10 weeks of crafts, handwork, painting, coloring, circle time, fairy tales, and more!Check out the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. for family fun, homeschooling, books, simple living, and 6 fabulous children, including twin toddlers

I think that should be the forum's official motto-
when you know better, you do better

Flowers, fairies, gardens, and rainbows-- To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.: 10 weeks of crafts, handwork, painting, coloring, circle time, fairy tales, and more!Check out the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. for family fun, homeschooling, books, simple living, and 6 fabulous children, including twin toddlers

I want to subscribe to this thread and get notification when the new forum is up & running. Won't go into details, but I'm finding as ds gets older/more determined (some would call it defiant, but he's only 22 months) I struggle more & more.

I know my motto is, "When you know better, you do better," I think it makes perfect sense to be this forum's motto too.

Hey all- No news on the forum yet, I know CM is working on it tho. Until it is up and running, I just wanted to do a little check in and make sure everyone is ok while we wait... Please anyone, if you are haivng trouble, please PM, Email or IM me if you need to talk!

I'm glad to see there will be a forum like this, but I too, like lasiuslightning, and disappointed the requirements are so high... I don't feel I've gotten to really know anyone on here, so I doubt I'd be let in based on posting history, yet I feel I need support now... my DD is 8 and I've been a terrible mom... and now I have another on the way... I want to break this cycle, but I can't do it alone... I've tried.

Oh well.

And TIA for any offers of pm's or emails... but I don't like to be so one-on-one... makes me uncomfortable... part of my background I guess.

I do not want to presume to speak for Mothering.com, so please know that I am just speaking for myself.

What will make this forum unique and especially helpful to me is that it will be an extension of the mothering community. While the requirements are high (higher than I originally expected!) I appreciate them, because it ensures that anyone who joins the new forum will be active, contributing members of mothering. Cynthia did say that exceptions could and would be made. As a previous poster wrote, stick around. Get to know us, and let us know you. Please do not feel that the requirements somehow label you not worthy. You are worthy of every good thing.

Flowers, fairies, gardens, and rainbows-- To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.: 10 weeks of crafts, handwork, painting, coloring, circle time, fairy tales, and more!Check out the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. for family fun, homeschooling, books, simple living, and 6 fabulous children, including twin toddlers

Posting nervously... After growing up with a father who did nothing but instill fear in me (to say I was relieved when he left my dear mom, and that I was old enough to not have court decide for me if I should have to see him, is an understatement) I am so grateful for this upcoming forum!! I need help working on not yelling (which was a biggy of his, which is why it kills me that I do it at all the guilt the few times I have had that as a first reaction hurts so much)

Yes, that's it EXACTLY!! I HATE that I ever yell, but it's like it is *programmed* in me.

Ditto here. It feels so horribly wrong to yell, and I feel as if I could vomit afterwards. Changing these behaviors is so very difficult that I know having other mamas to confide in and learn from would be helpful.

I feel that we should have a very strict requirement for the forum. Registered for at least a year and a minimum of 500 posts. Or someone with over 500 posts and less than a year registered could be considered based on participation and vice versa. I can see no other way to give us a feeling of the member being here sincerely and with some posting history to know the person a bit and feel comfortable to approve access.

What if the mods don't like me???

Mama to 10 so far:Mother of Joey (23), Dominick (15), Abigail (13), Angelo (10), Mylee (8), Delainey (6), Colton (4), ID girls Dahniella and Nicolette (2 in July), and Baby 10 coming sometime in July 2015. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

I think that should be the forum's official motto-
when you know better, you do better

I love it!!!

Mama to 10 so far:Mother of Joey (23), Dominick (15), Abigail (13), Angelo (10), Mylee (8), Delainey (6), Colton (4), ID girls Dahniella and Nicolette (2 in July), and Baby 10 coming sometime in July 2015. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

Originally Posted by annettemarie
I think that should be the forum's official motto-
when you know better, you do better

I think it is really catchy, but it is true? Because of course I know better and I know the consequences, it's the act of changing that is so difficult and what torments me so. I suppose knowing IS at least half the battle

to give just a bit more of an update.... I don't have time to really PM all of you wonderful mama's individually that filled up my PM box and let me know you were here to help me if need be.....

I am a mother to a now 7 month old daughter.

That screaming in the face thing I spoke of earlier... yeah : : that was at her. : : : : :

That night my DH ralized I have a lot of deep rooted issues I still have instilled in me from childhood. He realized I needed a break. So he let me choose, and I chose 3 days of uninterrupted (except boobjuice feedings and bedtime) time to myself.

I needed it. Today was my first day with my DD without my DH around at all since that incident. And she and I came home giggling at eachother, making goofy faces, and blowing spit bubbles. I did get a little worn thin at the end and began to get snappy, but DH recognized it (thankfully ) before it became screaming again.

The only thing is that I take things out on DH more readily now. Because I *feel* like have have to scream, hit, throw things, etc to get my frusterations out. I **KNOW** I don't HAVE to... it's just... instilled I guess. We fight while she's in the room. She sees us yell and it makes me cry because I dont want her to see what I saw as a kid. I want her to see the love. My DH and I love eachother a lot. I just have difficulty showing emotions aside from anger. I want to get better. I know this day out with my DD was only a SMALL SMALL step.... but I hope it's an improvement.

Thank you mama's for PMing me with your care and concern. I wish I had the time to individually talk to each one of you. But unfortunately, I don't. My life financially is in the pit. (DH lost his job and can't seem to get another for the life of all his trying so I'm having to go back to work fulltime.... I'm very stressed with scheduling in pumpings, feeding, me time, couple time, and quality baby time... not to mention I have the flu this week )

I all you mama's and I long for the day I reach 500 posts....

GREAT MOM to dd (5), dd (1) and )ds( [sept 26 2006]. Married to a Navy Veteran!

I can relate with the feeling of being overstressed and financial on the short end of the stick!

Mama to 10 so far:Mother of Joey (23), Dominick (15), Abigail (13), Angelo (10), Mylee (8), Delainey (6), Colton (4), ID girls Dahniella and Nicolette (2 in July), and Baby 10 coming sometime in July 2015. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

Originally Posted by Cynthia Mosher
I feel that we should have a very strict requirement for the forum. Registered for at least a year and a minimum of 500 posts. Or someone with over 500 posts and less than a year registered could be considered based on participation and vice versa. I can see no other way to give us a feeling of the member being here sincerely and with some posting history to know the person a bit and feel comfortable to approve access.

See, that upset me a lot....

I haven't read all the posts so pardon me if that has been nixed...
...but if not

I can completely understand wanting to provide a safe environment and being fearful of "insincere" posts or what have you, but I think that a rule like that would exclude A LOT of people, me included, who genuinely want to contribute but haven't been here that long (even though I probably average like 10 posts a day already lol)....

Why couldn't you just make it like, must have 100 posts or something...seriously, usually "trolls" etc, will not get to 100 posts before they are reported/banned etc, and seeing as there are SO FEW "bad apples" on here, I think the reporting system would work well....believe me, all it would take would be ONE post by someone being derrogatory or something equally as cruel etc, to incur the wrath or both members and mods alike....

...of course the arguement might be made that no one deserves to even see that ONCE (derrogatory post)...yet at the same time, I feel that the members of MDC who seriously need/want help or support but don't meet the requirements will suffer a lot more if they are excluded, that it is worth risking the RARE occurance of someone "trolling" etc...

The only thing is that I take things out on DH more readily now. Because I *feel* like have have to scream, hit, throw things, etc to get my frusterations out. I **KNOW** I don't HAVE to... it's just... instilled I guess. We fight while she's in the room. She sees us yell and it makes me cry because I dont want her to see what I saw as a kid. I want her to see the love. My DH and I love eachother a lot. I just have difficulty showing emotions aside from anger. I want to get better. I know this day out with my DD was only a SMALL SMALL step.... but I hope it's an improvement.

Oh my, this is us exactly. I'm sorry, this brought tears to my eyes. I HATE that we fight and scream and shout and curse at each other in front of our ds, but it's so hard sometimes, so very very hard. We love each other so much, we really do, but we just simply can't have disagreements without screeching at each other. Sometimes I am so ashamed of myself, and the worst part is how utterly cold I can become during these fights, trying so hard not to show any emotion. That's my problem, I never express my feelings. I just let them build up until I explode.

I don't want ds to see us like this. I don't want ds to see us like this.

Flowers, fairies, gardens, and rainbows-- To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.: 10 weeks of crafts, handwork, painting, coloring, circle time, fairy tales, and more!Check out the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. for family fun, homeschooling, books, simple living, and 6 fabulous children, including twin toddlers

Then a few+ members all said they liked 'Breaking the Chain', but I don't think the discussion went beyond that. (I will look back through again, though, since I had only skimmed for the list of forum name ideas I remembered seeing.)

Wife of 1. Mom of 3. Conquering disability challenges, one achievement at a time.