His is what happened on the first 15 minutes of my lifetime; read this and try not to laugh.When I was born, I didn't want to come out. I wrapped the chord around my neck, so I wouldn't have to come out. The doctors couldn't get me out so they had to suck me out with a vacuum cleaner. If you want to know why I am so messed up, here is your answer.

Why are you saying that that's the reason you're so messed up? when I was born, I decided to scare my mom by not breathing. freaked her out pretty bad I guess. She still talks about it. But, guess what. I'm perfectly normal, with a few extra quirks here and there.