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Greetings, literarians, Derby Day is upon us! With less than 24 hours until the greatest 90 seconds in all of sports, we present to you with the latest line-up of tomorrow’s beautiful horses and their crazy names! We’re pulling for the 50-1 long-shot Rousing Sermon.

And of course what Derby Day would be complete with a picture of the original Gonzo master. This julep’s for you, Hunter. S. Thompson. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.