spigot: I WOULD PREFER YOU NOT SQUEEZE AND GROPE WHAT YOU DESCRIBE AS MY "DOODLE DONG"
pants: THIS BONG IS FILTHY !!! WE'LL NEED RUBBING ALCOHOL AND RICE
spigot: MY NUTS HAVE FEELINGS TOO AND ESPECIALLY WITH THE KICKING, ETC
pants: THE RICE IS TO TRAP THE REPUBLICAN GUARD HERE AND ABROAD
spigot: I'M UNDER ARREST JUST BECAUSE FOR NO REASON
pants: I CAN SEE YOUR BUNKER BUSTER (DRINKING THE RUBBING ALCOHOL)