Let’s not beat about the bush, here – my blogging days are over. While I see crazy, hilarious, depressing and interesting stuff all over the Internet and in my life everyday about which I would love to write and tell you, I just don’t seem to have the ability anymore. So before (I hope before?) I turn this blog into a festival of rubbish, I think it’s time to shut it down.

It’s been a marvellous five-and-a-bit years of sharing some of the contents of my head with you. Some remarkable things have happened to me, South Africa and the world during this time, and I have really loved being able to muse about them with you.

That you have taken the time to say ‘howzit’ and have allowed me to know your own opinions whether through your comments, your own blogs or in person, has been special and so very valuable and meaningful to me – thank you.

Please do keep in touch. Email me at dbawiw@gmail.com and I will give you the email address I use on a daily basis.

Took in ‘Bridesmaids’ this past weekend, which was very funny and very perceptive in terms of how it portrayed the ‘haves and have-nots’, i.e. the marrieds/soon-to-be marrieds and the those who are not. I greatly enjoyed how the complications were presented, and the wickedly hilarious scenes in which the bridesmaids tried on dresses, and when they were on the plane to Vegas.

Saw ‘Jesus Christ Superstar’, which was excellent. Tight performances by all and a kick-ass prop cross.

Ate and meandered around Art on Main one sunny Sunday morning. Always fun and interesting to be in a green little cultural spot in the heart of the CBD.

Finally, in an attempt to get back into reading fiction, I was advised to try the English version of Afrikaans thriller-writer, Deon Meyer’s ‘Thirteen Hours’. I’m 120 pages in, and I daresay I might actually succeed in finishing this novel.

The last few I’ve started – a fiction novel by my one of my favourite authors that focusses somewhat on incest; a ‘true-life’ account of the drug-taking by a New York Times journalist; a modern classic about a female murderer in the 19th century, and a collection of, sadly, quite unexciting short essays by one of my favourite South African authors – have just not managed to grab me, and I fear I am becoming unused to concentrating on reading for more than 10 minutes at a time, which is about the length of time it takes to read a long-form article on the interweb.

Perhaps this little ‘skiet, skop and donder’ will get me back to where I wanna be.

A Zimbabwean man upstaged 15 others to win the Mr Ugly title at a weekend pageant, a local newspaper reported Monday. Thirty-year-old Austin Mbewe from the second city of Bulawayo won 1,200 South African rand ($174, 122 euros) and a blanket at the contest held Saturday in the border town of Beitbridge, the Herald newspaper said.

“I feel honoured by this victory,” the paper quoted him as saying after winning the title. “I have been a subject of ridicule from society since childhood and the world has seen that there is a beautiful side to my ugliness.” Organiser Lovemore Chonzi said: “Basically, the competition is meant for people to have fun and celebrate who they are, just like any other contest in the world.”

The competition, which is in its third year, has the blessing of the country’s arts council and the government tourism authority. The winner was chosen by a panel of female judges. Two runners-up won 600 rand and 500 rand respectively and a blanket each. A similar competition is being planned for the capital Harare on Monday. Source : Sapa-AFP

FIFA president, Sepp Blatter, has requested the help of former Johannesburg mayor, Amos Masondo, to accurately define the term ‘crisis’ and develop an alternate term for future foul-ups.

On the day on which Blatter was re-elected for a fourth term as president of football’s governing body, it was revealed by a source close to Masondo that the soccer honcho wanted to get together with the ex-mayor to put pay to the term ‘crisis’, once and for all.

This followed the Swiss codger’s denial that FIFA was in crisis, after allegations of bribery led to two senior members quitting, and many more executives under the spotlight for corruption.

“Crisis, what is a crisis?” Blatter told a news conference following an executive committee meeting.

In January this year, Masondo, too, struggled with the c-word. He referred to the fact that thousands of Johannesburg residents’ services were cut off, or that they received bills alleging that they’d run up electricity and rates’ bills amounting, literally, to millions of rand, merely as a ‘challenge’, vehemently denying that there was a crisis unfolding.

According to Demigod Mtshonga, a member of the Crisis Team for the Avoidance of the Term Crisis (CTATC), “Mr Blatter sent a telegram and a Tweet to Mr Masondo, asking to meet at the News Café in Fredman drive, Sandton, this weekend, when the FIFA boss’s schedule opens up a bit.”

Both nay-sayers have been spotted poring over the ‘C’ section of the Oxford English Dictionary in preparation for the meeting. Mtshonga divulged that a task-team of English language professors has also been established in order to suggest a variety of substitutes for the term crisis – a word, which has been banned both in ex-Gauteng mayoral circles, as well as throughout the football world.

The leaked suggestions thus far for a replacement term include “pickle”, “stew” and “fix”. “Right fucking balls-up” was repeatedly scratched off the list.