O Me of Little Faith

Simple Answers to Difficult Questions

Sometimes, as a writing exercise, I just decide to start writing about an idea and see where it leads. That’s what today’s post is.

My tendency is to over-analyze and over-explain when someone asks me complicated questions, especially theological ones. So I thought it would be a fun exercise to just sit down, think of random questions, and type out the simplest answers that came to mind. Because in most cases, simple answers make me happier than convoluted ones.

As these sorts of self-administered Q&As tend to go, the whole thing eventually turned weird. But at that point I was committed to it. Anyway, this has been sitting in my blog queue for a few days. I guess it’s time to post it.

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Can you prove to me that God exists?No.

Can you prove to me that God doesn’t exist?No.

Can I know God’s plan for my life?Yes. It’s in Matthew 22. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” Don’t forget about the “mind” part, because a lot of Christians often do. Also, “love your neighbor as yourself.”

That’s it?Oh, I forgot. Ephesians 2:10 says you were created to do good works, and God has prepared in advance for you to do them. So I suppose that’s his plan for you.

But doesn’t God have, like, a whole script for me about what career I should have and where I should go to college and who I should marry?I doubt it. If he wanted you to do something so particular, why would he make figuring it out such an ambiguous process?

Should I worry that the world is going to end on December 21, 2012?No. Don’t worry about it any more than you should worry about the world ending on December 22, 2012. Or that it will end tomorrow, for that matter.

But the ancient Mayans predicted it!They predicted the collapse of our civilization on December 21, 2012, but didn’t predict the collapse of their own civilization at the time of the Spanish conquest 500 years ago? Interesting.

Are you worried that President Obama is a Muslim?Where did THAT question come from? I’ve learned to stay away from politics.

But couldn’t he be lying as part of a Marxist/Islamic conspiracy?I guess. But as a Christian, are you in the habit of not believing people’s personal testimonies about God? Like, how would you feel if you came up to me and said, “I am a Christian,” and I insinuated that you were lying? That’s not very charitable. Does grace only apply to you and not others? Obama is your neighbor, right? I suggest you follow God’s plan for your life and love him as you love yourself. Do unto others and stuff. Also, don’t forget the part about loving God with your mind.

Wait, are you a liberal?I have no idea.

Are you a conservative?I do like to conserve things.

As a Christian, doesn’t it bother you that we can’t post the 10 Commandments on government buildings?Do you have the 10 Commandments posted in your own home? If not, you’ll need to do that first before I take your question seriously.

Fine. I just finished posting the 10 Commandments on the wall of my living room.The answer is no. It does not bother me that government buildings can’t post the 10 Commandments. It sort of bothers me that you now have them posted in your living room, though. But now that I think about it, my grandmother used to have a brass plaque of them posted in her house, and she’s awesome. So that’s OK.

What Bible translation should I use?Whichever one you find clearest and most informative to read.

Should I get a tattoo? Sure, if you want one and if you think it’ll still look awesome when you’re 73.

But the Bible outlaws tattoos in Leviticus 19:28.Correct. Also, two verses ahead of the no-tattoos verse, it says not to eat meat with the blood still in it. And Leviticus 19:27 says not to cut the hair on the sides of your head. If you’re going to worry about a tattoo, you should also follow a kosher diet and stop going to Supercuts.

Do you have a tattoo?Yes. I have Leviticus 19:28 tattooed across my back as a reminder to others.

I’m not sure what the original context is, but Leviticus 19:28 sounds awesomely non-sequitur. “You should not drink and drive because of the leprechauns, and you also shouldn’t be wearing bowler hats. I’m on a HORSE.”

Why doesn’t the bible talk about dinosaurs? Or the infiniteness of space? why doesn’t it address the extreme inefficiency of the universe if the universe has billions of trillions of stars in it, but life on only one rock orbiting one star? Why doesn’t the bible talk about any modern scientific discovery?
Is it because it wasn’t really written by the hand of god through man and the writers of the time had no idea about such things? Or was it because god saw fit not to address such thing when man wasn’t ready for it?
These are questions I’ve learned to not ask anymore. I’m still working on not being content with not being able to have an answer.

“Why doesn’t the bible talk about dinosaurs? Or the infiniteness of space? why doesn’t it address the extreme inefficiency of the universe if the universe has billions of trillions of stars in it, but life on only one rock orbiting one star? Why doesn’t the bible talk about any modern scientific discovery?”
Because it has nothing to do with the redemption and reconciliation narrative of the Bible.
* Simple answers are much easier to give.

“Why doesn’t the Bible talk about dinasaurs?” Why doesn’t the Bible mention America? Or the UK (where I live)? Because God doesn’t care about nations and politics, only human souls. Or maybe God doesn’t notice anyone who doesn’t live in the Middle East….

Are you worried that Obama is the Anti Christ?
Nope. If he is, what can I do about that anyways? If he isn’t, then good for him.
Do you think babies go to hell?
Yes, I do actually. If we’re born with a sin nature, why wouldn’t they? Why do you think Satan is using the abortion movement so frequently?
Do you have a problem with the Pope?
No, Billy Graham is the Baptist Pope equivalent. The runner up was Jerry Falwell.
What kind of bee makes milk?
Boobies.
What if Hilter went to heaven?
It wouldn’t surprise me. We say anyone can get saved, yet deep down inside we tend to put a limit on who Jesus saves.
Do you think time travel is possible?
No, I agree with Stephen Hawking on this one. Nobody from the future has come to visit us. Which in reality would be us.
Do you think listening to secular music is wrong?
No. If it was, I guess you need to throw out that Bach and Mozart CD’s you have though.

How should I deal with whackos from both sides of the religion question? With loving, reasoned responses to their arguments.
What if they won’t stop arguing and accept that you’re totally and completely right? Say “Bless your heart” and give them a side hug…, wait, that’s Acuff’s thing. Oh well, it still works.

JB, your blog rocked today!! Made me smile. Okay a few questions and answers:
1. Are frontal hugs immoral and do they lead to having affairs with others?
Uh, no, not as far as I’m concerned. Getting a side hug from someone is the equivalent of eating sugar free cake when you are in need of comfort food. If you can’t handle giving a man or woman a frontal hug without lusting after him or her, you may want to look into becoming a monk.
2. Do unicorns exist?
Probably not because if they did, people would be trying to ride them.
3. Did unicorns once exist?
Definitely. Not only does the Bible talk about them, but there are tons of pictures of them in medieval type books. Okay so they could be pictures illustrating fictional works, but there weren’t a whole lot of fictional works in medieval times so I stand by my belief that they once existed, along with dragons.
4. Did dragons once exist?
See above.
5.What is the biggest enemy of the Christian faith?
Christians. We have single-handedly alienated more people from Christianity and driven more people away from the cause of Christ than all the atheists in the world could ever hope to do.
6. Why do you say that?
Because a lot of Christians do a lot of talking, a lot of condemning, a lot of pointing of the finger, a lot of judging, and a lot of sneering at others who don’t line up with their theology, but very little loving, caring, comforting, grieving, forgiving, and asking forgivness.
7. Did Jesus promote a certain kind of political structure?
NO! Jesus said “love thy neighbor” and that’s about as far from politics as you can get. Should we support political advocates that want to care for widows and orphans? Definitely, but how do you know they’ll really do what they promise? That’s the problem. The best thing we can do is care for those who need help in our own towns, neighborhoods and churches. If everyone would do that, then we wouldn’t have to depend on politicians or government to do what Jesus said we should be doing ourselves.
Okay, I’m done after Lucky Seven. Oops, one more–
8. Do you have a lucky number?
yes. Number seven.
9. Are you a heretic?
No, just a misfit.
10. Is this the last question?
Yes. :))

AMD52 In reading this for the first time in a long time the laughs were great but also, very true for i guess we as one all in one, should also, listen and be mindful for in great responses in a (lack of sharing) funny also, gives us the intent for the way we act and behalf towards one another amen to all have a great day.

Can I show you God? maybe! can I prove God exists maybe!
can I prove God dose not exists No
Can I know Gods plan in my live today Yes , tomorro No
As a Christian, doesn’t it bother you that we can’t post the 10 Commandments on government buildings. Yes because It’s the foundatsion of law for all not just for this Country!
Put the 10 Commandments in your heart you will never lose them! And thay won’t get knot off the wall!
But the ancient Mayans predicted it! If you live like thay have yes!
OK Jason I have got them all but one or two and them I have say in it!.
now
Are you worried that President Obama is a Muslim? Yes because the Muslim live like the Mayans!
What Bible translation should I use? King James He was not a King for nothing!
But aren’t some of them, like, Satanic or something? I see nothing wroung with only good works (that) should tell you something!
Should I get a tattoo? Not for me I am already a work of art!.
Do you have a tattoo? No but I have a few cuts and crapes and scars that have a story or two!
I have one “How can you follow someone like God or Jesus if you don’t know he is there or not” what I see is I do by Faith trusting Faith He is there so I follow Faithfuly!.
Three thing I do. Seek God with all my heart mine and body, I shell find it,ask it shell be given to you what you ask, knot and it should open up to you! Thes three things I do.
I keep telling you this is Gods Country and I can’t unstand why no one take’s that to heart! “You can not take away what already has been given WE gave it to God whan We first came here!. you can place him were you want but you can not kick Him out!. but I realy don’t think you can place Him anywere!. WE are His ,He is not Owned by Us
I say again You can not change the Will of God if He spook it, it will not come back void! he handed this land to you to tend to it untell He returns 2000 years is about over and the Jews has been accounted for!. so how much do you know about your God?. better yet the Father of Jesus because Jesus will point you to the Father! do you know that!. and you shell see the Son of Man soming with all power and mite his reward is with Him!. Is He handing out rewards now by your works?!.
I not reading form a book I telling you what I see!.

i have learned that it is written to do everything in the name of christ, go into life fully commited to being a follower of christ not a fan. but am i not supposed o then enjoy the simple pleasures of thelittle things like watching football, am i suppose to not do tings that please my immediate satisfaction, how is it possible to be 100 percent commited give up everything, only think of god always, never think of my wife or daughter or anything else that isnt the lord?
do you believe i will remember this life once i enter the next, i love my life why would god not let me remember my wife or my daughter, why would he strip me of not being with them in heaven and praising together for eternity

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