Latest Made-Up Rumors Suggest Cher Will Play Catwoman in Next Batman Movie

In case you haven’t heard, the newest nonsensical casting rumor concerning the not-yet-announced (and probably not-yet-imagined) sequel to The Dark Knight is that Cher is Christopher Nolan’s “first choice” to play Catwoman, whom, according to a poorly sourced report in the Telegraph, Nolan wants to portray as “a vamp in her twilight years.” As untrue as this probably all is, wouldn’t it be totally awesome?

Sadly, the Telegraph also claims that Johnny Depp has already signed on as the Riddler (which he surely hasn’t) and that shooting on the movie (under the completely made-up name The Caped Crusader) will commence in Vancouver early next year, which we’d imagine will be a difficult without a screenplay. The story notes that Cher hasn’t acted since she played herself in the Farrelly brothers’ crappy 2003 conjoined-twins comedy Stuck on You, but what really probably makes her casting unlikely is the fact that her speaking voice is as deep as Batman’s.