Earlier today, Bobby Finger—Jezebel writer, rumormonger, and my enemy—reported that Ben Affleck has been dating his children’s nanny, Christine Ouzounian, since his separation from Jennifer Garner. Well, BOBBY, Ben Affleck has responded to these allegations and wants you to know that YOU’RE A LIAR.

Via Page Six:

“The story is complete garbage and full of lies. You shouldn’t be able to hide behind ‘blind sources’ and attempt to destroy families going through a difficult time. The tabloid [Us Weekly] decided to construct stories in order to sell magazines. It’s like story time in kindergarten. It’s shameful and desperate,” a rep for Affleck told Page Six on Wednesday.

“Ben’s focus has been on his family and his work—with family coming first,” a source tells E! News. “Dating is not his focus and it hasn’t been his focus throughout the separation period... There is nothing physical or romantic between Ben and Christine... Ben is super friendly and sometimes that is misconstrued.”

Ben’s reps are currently considering taking legal action agains US Weekly, the tabloid that originally ran the story about his alleged affair with the nanny. No word so far on whether or not he’ll be suing Bobby Finger personally.

(Please note that all my bitterness towards Bobby Finger stems from him being taller and better at Photoshop than me.)