CSI: Miami Season Premiere: The Origin of Horatio Caine's Sunglasses

CSI: Miami's producers have finally realized who the true star of the show is: Horatio Caine's sunglasses. In a perfect world, the sunglasses would talk (preferably voiced by Mo'Nique or Emo Philips), helping Horatio solve his cases, but they're doing the next best thing in the show's eighth season premiere: giving the sunglasses a backstory.

Actually, it's a backstory of how the team originally met, but does anyone really care about the emotional origins of these characters? No, we just want to know how Horatio gets his sunglasses, and it's (*spoiler alert*) partially revealed in the preview above. Poor Horatio was "standing out there in the Everglades, kind of shading my eyes because I don't wear sunglasses," when some other team member who's name I don't know because I don't actually watch this show presents him with a pair of polarized (fancy) shades.

The show will premiere Monday, September 21, on CBS. Of course, if you're not a fan, network TV offers you lots of other options Monday nights at 10, such as, um, Jay Leno's ego and Castle, which has nothing to do with an actual castle.