Survivor: Micronesia - Assuming What CBS Wants us to AssumeThursday, April 24, 2008

Survivor: Micronesia has been taken over by the ladies. Of course, you already knew that if you've turned on CBS anytime in the past week. Survivor: Fans vs. Favorites is lady-heavy right now, thanks to Ozzy's surprise ejection last week. We see in the CBS promos that the females appear to rise up and join forces on tonight's upcoming episode. Even though this is what the promos insinuate, that doesn't mean anything. CBS likes to throw viewers off the scent – but, that female majority is still difficult to ignore. So, just for fun, I want to see what would happen if the ladies actually do what CBS is leading us to believe they will – pick off the remaining men one by one.

James Clement is the likely first target, followed by Jason Siska, and then Erik Reichenbach. Let's assume that the ladies stick together, don't turn on each other and systematically get rid of all the testosterone on the island. What then?

There would five women remaining on the island: Favorites Amanda Kimmel, Parvati Shallow and Cirie Fields with Fans Natalie Bolton and Alexis Jones. Cirie will probably, again, act as the swing vote in this situation. Cirie is the unsung hero of this Survivor season, the puppet master who's been involved in every big decision and has been manipulating fellow castaways all season. If it gets down to the five women, only two things can happen – everyone will jointly turn on Cirie and vote her out, or Cirie will make the decision whether to vote off a Fan or a Favorite. Of course, I'm assuming that Amanda and Parvati stay together – ditto with Natalie and Alexis.

Natalie and Alexis are tight, at least that's how it looks, but Amanda and Parvati have shown signs of weakness as a duo. Parvati, especially, looks willing to leave Amanda if the right opportunity presents itself. The goal for Parvati, Amanda, Cirie and Alexis will be to take Natalie to the final tribal council, because she's easily the least dynamic player out of the five. Another thing to keep in mind: Where will Amanda's head be at now that her man Ozzy is on the jury?

OK, so with all of this in mind, assuming that the final five on Survivor: Micronesia is all-woman, here's how I see that final five working out.

5th Place: Amanda Kimmel

Parvati and Cirie will team up and put a sad, puppy-dog faced Amanda out of her misery and into the arms of showmance Ozzy.

4th Place: Cirie Fields

Parvati will make a great play and remove the mastermind from the game.

3rd Place: Natalie Bolton

In the final, three-person tribal council, Natalie will receive no votes, because she's a floater.

2nd Place: Parvati Shallow

Good ol' Parv will have a good case with the jury, but I don't she'll make it as well as Alexis.

1st Place: Alexis Jones

Alexis is a motivational speaker for a living. She's can convince the jury, and with Cirie gone will be able to take credit for some of the big plays, including taking Ozzy out and getting the women to join together.