The Most Epic Cheesecake Recipe Ever

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We may have Joy the Baker's infamous "Man Bait" Apple Crisp recipe committed to memory, but it's not the only reason we're loyal to this self-taught dessert maven. Joy's hilariously soulful commentary, undying devotion to butter, and steadfast belief that cake is a perfectly acceptable breakfast choice are what really keep us coming back for more.We may have Joy the Baker's infamous "Man Bait" Apple Crisp recipe committed to memory, but it's not the only reason we're loyal to this self-taught dessert maven. Joy's hilariously soulful commentary, undying devotion to butter, and her steadfast belief that cake is a perfectly acceptable breakfast choice is what really keeps us coming back for more.

I feel like a good amount of high school girls read my blog. I know this because most of them write me emails asking how to get through high school. Usually the only answers I have for them include trying out for volleyball and journalism, and cutting their hair awkwardly short. That’s really the only experience I have, and I really shouldn’t push that on strangers. I recently received a question from a dear and darling high school senior in Chicago. She called into the Homefries voicemail to ask us a question. She didn’t have a Chicago accent (I was listening). The questions boils down to this:

I’m in high school. I’m a senior. I’ve liked this dude since my freshman year. We’ve texted a few times. I think he likes me. I just don’t know if I should keep pursuing this guy because we’re never going to see each other again once I go to college.

My answer is this:
You’ve liked the same dude since freshman year? Dang. It’s too bad dudes in high school don’t know how to act. I’m 30 and most dudes my age don’t know how to act. Here’s the deal. You can sneak this dude behind the bungalows to make-out with him… that’s it. Simple. (Mom, I didn’t do any of this. Seriously. That’s not even a lie to spare your feelings). Mostly you just have to wait for this dude to grow up. That will probably take a while. Sorry high school is so awkward and confusing. We’ve all been there, except without the text messaging confusion. Make-out or don’t, but don’t make it too complicated. In short, go to college, don’t sleep around, learn how to be an awesome and independent woman. No biggie.

Oh! Also… learn how to make an awesome cheesecake and feel good about your life.