still kickin’

your spelling errors have ruined my appetite

(go here to see a bigger size, plus all the spelling errors pointed out)

Look, I’m not a grammar nazi. Sure, I get worked up over extraneous apostrophes, and I tend to get irritated when people confuse you/you’re and their/they’re. But I’m not cantankerous about it. I won’t end a friendship over a misplaced comma or a misspelled word.

However, every once in a while I will read something that makes me want to go on a stabbing spree. For instance, this menu for a recently opened Mexican restaurant in my neighborhood.

The people who own this small cafe sort of place also own a larger restaurant a few towns over, where the menus and flyers are free of errors. So the mistakes in this particular flyer are not because someone’s first language isn’t English. It’s because they were lazy and did not care enough about their restaurant’s image to make sure the damn flyer didn’t go out with at least eight different errors on it.

Seriously. Did someone not proofread this? I can’t even blame a printing company, as this was probably done in the restaurant’s office on a computer. But how could you not know? Maybe they could have looked at their dinner menu to make sure these words were spelled correctly? It’s about pride, people! I’m not being anal retentive here, I’m being, well, unreasonably angry that a business trying to drum up a customer base in a neighborhood plastered the town with flyers that only say to me “we are sloppy and careless.” Which means, dearest South of the Border owners, that I will not eat in your restaurant. If you can’t care enough to make sure your advertisement does not look like you are not even smarter than a third grader, I cannot in good conscience give you my money.

Never mind that you charge $18.50 for a damn quesidilla on the dinner menu. That’s reason enough not to stop by. Also, what you call Mexican food has very little to do with Mexico and more to do with, say, New Mexico. And what part of “south of the border” does Waldorf Salad come from? Excuse me, I mean Waldoff.

While I do applaud you for not using an apostrophe to turn heros into hero’s, I have to give you a failing grade on your flyer, as well as your idea that fajitas somehow belong on a hero.

Also, what you call Mexican food has very little to do with Mexico and more to do with, say, New Mexico

Oh, no you don’t! You’re not pinning that $18.95 quesadilla nonsense on MY state. No, no, no. Besides, say “fajita hero” here and at best, someone will want to know which comic book you’re referencing, and whether you’re maybe a little old to still be reading those things? More likely, though, they just won’t have any idea what you’re talking about. Sandwiches aren’t called heroes here. They’re subs.

I think my favorite error on this is “field grens.” FIELD GRENS. So okay, menu people, you got “field” right, even though it’s got that tricky i-e combination and, considering the myriad special needs on display here, I would totally have overlooked “feild” in this instance–but then you fucked up GREENS. Oh, nice one, menu people. Very nice.