Action, over-reaction and fighter-jet escorts

A DRUNK man flying with Air Tran from Atlanta to San Francisco on Friday refused to take his seat when told to and later locked himself in the loo. Here's what happened next:

Out of an abundance of caution, the captain elected to divert the aircraft to the nearest airport which was Colorado Springs Municipal Airport in Colorado Springs, Colo. The captain requested the local law enforcement officials meet the aircraft on arrival in Colorado Springs, Colo.

The plane, escorted by two F-16 fighters dispatched under the direction of Continental U.S. North American Aerospace Defense Command Region (NORAD), landed safely in Colorado Springs, Colo., at 11:55 a.m. MST and taxied to a remote location of the airport where law enforcement officials detained the individual in question.

The same day, two drunk passengers about to leave London Heathrow on an Emirates flight to Dubai apparently made some sort of a bomb threat. Here's what happened next:

Armed police boarded the Boeing 777 at about 9.15pm on Friday as it was taxiing for take off after some remarks made to cabin crew prompted them to alert the authorities.

The men were subsequently charged, one with being drunk, the other with being drunk and making a bomb threat.

Two days earlier, last Wednesday, a Hawaiian Airlines flight from Portland, Oregon to Maui turned back to Oregon after a passenger, angry that he couldn't stow his carry-on luggage at his feet (he was in a bulkhead seat), filled in a comments card and handed it to a flight attendant. She gave it to the pilot who considerd the words threatening enough to warrant the U-turn. NORAD duly scrambled two jets to intercept the plane.

I thought I was going to die, we were so high up. I thought to myself: I hope we don't crash and burn or worse yet landing in the ocean, living through it, only to be eaten by sharks, or worse yet, end up on some place like Gilligan's Island, stranded, or worse yet, be eaten by a tribe of headhunters, speaking of headhunters, why do they just eat outsiders, and not the family members? Strange ... and what if the plane ripped apart in mid-flight and we plumited (sic) to earth, landed on Gilligan's Island and then lived through it, and the only woman there was Mrs. Thurston Howell III? No Mary Anne (my favorite) no Ginger, just Lovey! If it were just her, I think I'd opt for the sharks, maybe the headhunters.

Odd, certainly. Really, seriously scary? No.

At 36,000 feet, with the safety of hundreds of passengers in their care, pilots should clearly react with ultra caution. And yet—from the safety of an office building—Gulliver finds it hard not to wonder what exactly is going on. None of these individuals sounds remotely threatening, although I can sympathise with the removal of the bomb-hoaxers. But fighter-jet escorts for aircraft with non-violent problem passengers? When cockpit doors are secure?

What precisely is the threat that warrants such a waste of everyone's time and money?

I've flown to Cuba on many occasions for holidays. The last time we were flying back to Canada on a Cubana airliner - an old Soviet plane with Russian signs and jump seats: as soon as we entered U.S. airspace we were intercepted and escorted by two U.S. fighters. Although the Americans were serious our flight crew founds it hilarious. Here they were at 30000 feet, smoking their Cuban cigars, passing the head-sets around, and playing peek-a-boo with the side window curtains in the cockpit. After about an hour the fighters left a plane full of intrigued Canadian tourists wondering. What a waste of money and resources just to see if we got properly tanned.