Social workers join politicians in hand-wringing over Egypt

Social workers were quick to join politicians today in hand-wringing over the chaos in Egypt.

The head of Social Workers, Maggie Whistance, said:'We love an opportunity to say how terible something is without actally doing anything about it. Usually it's yet another child allegedly in our care who has been murdered, but this time we have a whole country to do nothing about. It's great!'

The foreign secretary, William Hague, said:'I welcome the hand-wringing involvement of social workers, as they are very good at it. We're meeting this morning for a couple of hours so we can all say how awful the situation is, before we head off for a decent lunch. We might do some more hand-wringing afterwards if we can still remember who we are after numerous bottles of wine.'

The shadow foreign secretary, Douglas Alexander, said: 'It is typical of this government that all they can do about this is just to say how awful the situation is. Whereas we in the Labour party are saying how terrible it is!'