CONVERTED INFIDELS.

Christian logic is a curious thing. There is nothing like it, we should
imagine, in the heavens above or the waters under the earth. Certainly
there is nothing like it on the earth itself, unless we make an
exception in the case of Christian veracity, which is as much like
Christian logic as one cherry is like another.

It is a long time since Christians began arguing—it would be an outrage
on the dictionary to call it reasoning. They have been at it for nearly
two thousand years. Their founder, Jesus Christ, seldom argued. He
uttered himself dogmatically at most times; occasionally he spoke in
parables; and whenever he was cornered he escaped on a palpable evasion.
His great disciple, Paul, however, was particularly fond of arguing. His
writings abound in "for" and "whereas." The argument he most affected
was the circular one. He could run round a horseshoe, skip over from
point to point, and run round again as nimbly as any man on record. In
a famous chapter in Corinthians, for instance, he first proves the
resurrection of the dead by the resurrection of Jesus Christ, and then
proves the resurrection of Jesus Christ by the resurrection of the dead.
It is in the same chapter that he enunciates the botanical truth (a
truth of Bible botany, observe) that a seed does not bear anything
unless it dies. Altogether the great Apostle is a first-rate type of
the Christian logician, and there are some who declare him to be a
first-rate type of the Christian truth-teller.

Speeding down the stream of time to the present age, we see that
Christian logic (yes, and Christian veracity) has undergone little if
any alteration. It is as infantile and as impudent as ever. Arguments
that would look fallacious in the nursery are used in the pulpit,
generation after generation, with an air of solemn profundity, as though
they were as wise as the oracles of omniscience. To select from such
a plethora is almost impossible; the difficulty is where to begin. But
happily we are under no necessity of selection. A case is before us, and
we take it as it comes. It is a "converted infidel" case, in the report
of a recent sermon—the last of a series on "Is Christianity Played
Out?"—by the Rev. Dr. Hiles Hitchens; the gentleman referred to in one
of our last week's paragraphs as wishing for an old three-legged stool
or something made by Jesus Christ. Dr. Hitchens, alas! cannot find the
stool, and has to put up with the creed instead; though, perhaps, he
gets as much out of the creed as he would make by selling the stool to
the British Museum.

Dr. Hitchens preached from the text, "The earth shall be full of the
knowledge of the Lord"—a statement which, after the lapse of so many
centuries, has still to be couched in the future tense. The delay has
been excessive, but Dr. Hitchens is hopeful. He believes in the ultimate
and speedy fulfilment of the prophecy. One of his grounds for so
believing is this (we quote from the Christian Commonwealth), that
"Out of 20 leading lecturers, authors, editors, and debaters on the side
of Infidelity 17 have been brought to Christ within the last 30 years,
have left their infidel associations, openly professed the religion of
Jesus, and engaged in Christian work." The last he named, we are told,
was "the case of a National Secular lecturer, of whom the sceptics were
greatly proud, who has recently been received by, and now lectures for,
the Christian Evidence Society."

We leave the consideration of these "facts" for a moment, and deal
in the first place with Dr. Hitchens's peculiar logic. It is truly
Christian. The species is unmistakable. Seventeen Freethinkers have been
converted to Christianity! Wonderful! But how many Christians have been
converted to Freethought? Ay, there's the rub. For every specimen Dr.
Hitchens produces we will produce a thousand. Not only were the rank and
file of the Freethought party very largely brought up as Christians, but
its leaders are of the same category. Charles Bradlaugh was brought up
as a Christian, so was Colonel Ingersoll. Can Dr. Hitchens produce two
names among his "converts" of the same weight, or a half, a quarter, or
a tithe of it? Every leader of Freethought in England, we believe, is a
convert from Christianity. As to the "leading" men Dr. Hitchens refers
to, we presume they are the persons initialed in the late Mr. Whitmore's
tract, and those among them who were leaders were not converted, and
those who were converted were not leaders. The real leaders of the
Freethought party, those who were long in its service, and were
entrusted with power and responsibility, were never converted. And the
cases on Mr. Whitmore's list are old. They have an ancient and fish-like
smell. Dr. Hitchens will perhaps be good enough to tell us the name
of any man of real distinction in the Freethought party who has been
"converted" during the last twenty years. We defy him to do so. If he
goes back far enough he will find a few men who were not trusted in our
party, and a few weaklings who could not fight an uphill battle, who
went over to the enemy. Real leaders of our party fought, suffered,
and starved, but they never deserted the flag. Christianity could not
convert a Bradlaugh or a Holyoake; it could only bribe or allure a
Sexton or a Gordon, or others of the "illustrious obscure" in Mr.
Whitmore's fraudulent catalogue. In short, the "conversions" to
Christianity so trumpeted are mostly dubious, generally insignificant,
and all ancient. If the prophecy which Dr. Hitchens preached from is to
be accomplished, it will have to quicken its rate of fulfilment during
the past twenty years. We convert tremendously more Christians than you
do Freethinkers; the balance is terribly to your disadvantage; you can
only make out a promising account by setting down your infinitesimal
gains and making no entry of your tremendous losses.

The only recent case that Dr. Hitchens refers to is that of "a National
Secular lecturer, of whom the sceptics were greatly proud." Dr. Hitchens
evidently takes this gentleman at his own estimate. That he thinks
the sceptics were greatly proud of him is intelligible; it is quite in
keeping with his shallow, vulgar, And egotistical nature. But the truth
is "the sceptics," in any general sense, were not proud of him. He
was a very young man, with a great deal to learn, who had a very brief
career as a Secularist in East London. In a thoughtless moment a
local Secular Society gave him office, and that fact is his entire
stock-in-trade as a "converted Freethinker." He was never one of the
National Secular Society's appointed lecturers; he was neither "author,
editor, or debater"; and he was utterly unknown to the party in general.
Dr. Hitchens has, in fact, discovered a mare's nest. We are in a
position to speak with some authority, and we defy him to name any
Freethinker "of whom the sceptics were greatly proud" who has of late
years been converted to Christianity. It is easy enough to impose on an
ignorant congregation, and Dr. Hitchens is probably aware of the lengths
to which a reckless pulpiteer may carry his mendacity. But candid
investigators will conclude that "converted infidels" cannot be very
plentiful, when the majority of them are so ancient; nor very important,
when an obscure youth has to be advertised as "a leader" of whom the
sceptics (nine out of ten of them never having heard of him) were
"greatly proud."

We should imagine that Dr. Hitchens is rather new to this line of
advocacy. In the course of time he will learn—if indeed he has
not already learnt, and is concealing the fact—that the "converted
infidels" will not stand a minute's scrutiny. The only safe method is to
drop questionable cases and resort to sheer invention. Even that
method, however, is not devoid of peril, as one of its practitioners
has recently discovered. The Rev. Hugh Price Hughes must by this time
be extremely sorry he circulated that false and foolish story of the
converted Atheist shoemaker. The exposure of it follows him wherever
he goes, and illustrates the truth of at least one Bible text—"Be sure
your sin will find you out."