Sharleen Okwara

WHY THESE WOMEN ARE MORE THAN JUST BLOOD, THEY ARE GOD GIVEN EXAMPLES OF STRENGTH

“She’s my sister, break her heart I break your face”

-Unknown

Why we have these treasures in this life, we shall never truly know. One thing is for sure though, they are here for a reason. I don’t know about you, but I have one and I would love to appreciate mine as well as every other sister out there with this post. There is much to learn from your wit and wisdom, your love and your insight, you are more than a relative, you are an adviser, a friend and a source of joy to us all. I doubt that many can disagree with this one fact; sisters rock! If you doubt this, well, I hope you’ll take a keen look and see it for yourself, she is a gift.

This is a personal story, I know it’s kinda easy to say all sorts of wonderful things about one’s fellow family member without demonstrating how she earned her respect and praise. As way to demonstrate my praise, I want to be clear and dedicate this to my sisters, Bertha ‘Kaka’ and Sharleen. Both of you are walking wonders. How you have been with me and supported me all this while, I shall never understand. For never giving up on me, I am truly indebted to you. Keep being such shining examples of what it means to be women of influence and impact. I believe you both to truly be embodiments of the feminist ideals that your hero, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie speaks of (wherever you are, Chimamanda, I hope you are hearing this! You are a sister too so this article is for you).

When I was going through a cycle of my life as a guy, a cycle of low self-esteem, self-doubt, fear…just to name a few, I didn’t have many people that I could count on. There weren’t many people who knew me that well to support me and help me up on my feet and help me become who I am today. Being the first child in my family from both my paternal side and my maternal side to study theology, I had my share of challenges from the very start. I never though much of it initially, but until I went through a long stormy season that rocked me to my core, that’s when I truly understood. Dealing with a calling in this day and age is not easy, sometimes it feels easier to fall away and be someone else–which is exactly what I sought out to do during this dark period in my life.

Trust me, it may not seem like it right now but having that one family member, especially a sister (even that one cousin/family friend), helps. It’s even much better, several times over, if she prays; that is the one thing that astounds me to this day. For when I began to push people away, when I began to act different, when I no longer so my call as being of any worth, my sisters understood and stepped in to pray for me as well as provide counsel. And it was at this very time that I realized that I was merely falling short of the example I had been since the beginning. I did not see it myself until I got out that I sank real low. I wanted to be ‘that’ guy, the kind who could go out, the kind who could be ‘a ladies man’, the kind who could say all the right things but not commit to them. Yeah, ladies, gents, that was me. If you are at this point disgusted at this, I do not take offense, I was filthy, an ingrate.

There are many things guys like me go through, especially ministers and its largely due to one’s own insecurities. Lead a mega-ministry, but be weighed by an equally mega blemish. It is not unheard of. I, do by no means intend to belittle my actions, but intend to make it clear through this story that I am a human being with numerous faults and that I fess up to them and own them. Because of my sisters and their support, I have been able to find my way back to the Lord. I am not fully perfect but I cannot let a day go by before praying for these mighty women of valor. Kaka, Sharleen…I honor you. May the Lord increase, sustain, guide, nourish, provide and hunt you down with his favor and blessings always!

Sisters, we might have grown up with them, but we don’t know what the word means until the crisis comes. May I sincerely be blessed with a wife of such mettle as you.

In tears, I write this. I honor you sisters around the world. Keep making a difference, especially in the lives of your fellow siblings.