Why do stand-up comics need an audience? Well, we can’t grow in sunlight, only artificial light. Creative hydroponics. And what you say can’t be solidified until you’re able to say it on the stage, and if it doesn’t work, you either find a better way to say it, or you come up with another and better idea. Why? Only because you stood in that light. And there’s no getting around it. If you’re going to truly stand-up have to put your time in. And it shows.

If your passions become your hobby then you’ve watered-down your dreams. Hey, if you workout, comfort food never tastes good.

Okay, ideally the world can be a trampoline to bounce off, but when you hit the part that’s concrete–well, that’s when you have to eat the adult portion.

When you hit bottom, sometimes you have to bounce a few times before someone can catch you.

The reason Republicans like Trump is he is he talks like the worst of them: He talks like a boss who doesn’t think the law applies to his place of business. That’s why they can’t govern. They don’t know how to represent anything but their own interests.

The turning point in fighting cancer is when you stop saying, “I don;t deserve this.” Sure it’s a great excuse, but you don’t want an excuse from favcng the day, You realize energy directed at self-pity drains you from fighting cancer.