Blog Abandonment

I wonder what percentage of hardcore WP bloggers stay hardcore forever. My stint was short-lived but I came back, only to find most everyone gone. So I’m leaving this blog as it is and hope everyone who has gone, privatized or become perforated are well or better than well. Goodbye wordpress.

Let us know if you go elsewhere! I had to shut down hellosailor (becase PEOPLE are ARSEHOLES) but I have bonjourmarin.wordpress.com now. I’m not as hardcore at writing, I don’t have the time, but I still read and miss people when they go 😦 xox

Well, I don’t know if you still check this blog or not but I just wanted to tell you I often think of you. I came to visit a couple of times and found the blog gone. I worried but didn’t know who to ask. Unfortunately I missed your comeback and now you’re gone again.

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Ocelot Online

Sitting in the window watching for my kids’ bus. A car pulls up and a boy, 7 or 8 in baseball getup, gets out and runs to the back of the house across the street. The car, silver, idles – a man inside. I start to hear pounding, as of fists on a door. The pitch […]

The depression is ingrained after so many years – there almost every day – but every day seems to have it’s own manifestation. I almost wish I was at my worst so I could hospitalize and be cared for. I wish I was dead but am not suicidal, the ideation is there but not the […]

A few more minor events stand out. There was a girl, 10 or 11, who had a paper route on North Beacon. My little gang – my Lebanese neighbors, a Jamaican girl from across the street – and I secretly mocked her. She must have been the only white girl in the neighborhood besides me. […]

I didn’t know I had Complex PTSD until I was 36 years old. I deliberately turned off my trauma – tossed it, pretended it never happened – when Social Services removed my sister and I from our mother’s custody and placed us with our newly sober and forever ex-criminal father. We never talked about our […]