Sunday, August 18, 2013

French native Ketty Elisabeth tells us about her love affair with Ireland in her guest blog post

Dublin's fair city

Ireland was supposed to be a 6 to 12 months period of my
life. However, after just 4 weeks I met my fiancé and never left.

I fell in love with the country and especially Irish people.
They’re laid-back, easy-going, chatty and know how to have fun. It was such a
breath of fresh air moving from Paris to Dublin and life was much easier all of
a sudden: no smelly metro, no grumpy people and no nightmare bureaucracy. I was
amazed at how easy it was to rent a flat, set up a PPS number and do other
administrative things that are such a hassle in France. I was totally living
the Celtic Tiger dream back in 2004!

I made many expat friends in my first few years in
Ireland, unlike me they didn’t have Irish partners and decided to leave, it was
very difficult for me at this stage. They couldn’t stand the weather, the
drinking culture, the food, the expensive cost of living or they just didn’t
want to be foreigners anymore. Locals have their childhood friends, do stuff
with them after work or go home to their families at the weekends which make it
difficult to make real friends sometimes.

Now it’s different and easier as I get older. I don’t know
people who leave every week anymore and I have friends with Irish other halves
who I’m sure won’t leave the country. Being engaged to an Irish man certainly
helps me feel more at home and more integrated. I’ve now made Ireland my home, feel
I belong here and I’m never homesick. I don’t mind if the weather isn’t great
and I miss Ireland when I’m away. I feel a connection to this little island that
I don’t have with France anymore. Somehow I’m always reminded I’m not from here
but I have to get on with it. People ask me the same questions; ‘Do you like it
here?’ or ‘Do you go home often?’, I often get ‘Welcome to Ireland’ from the
garda at Dublin passport control or people ask me if I’m on holiday. I wonder
if I’ll still get this in 15 years’ time or when I’ll have my little Irish kids
with me.

France lacks of craic. People complain a lot, seem unhappy
and don’t seem to enjoy the little things in life. I don’t miss the use of the
‘vous’, people giving out about the heat, French men who chat you up in a vulgar
way, skinny women who just eat salads, people analysing the way you dress, the
French management style and so on. Sometimes I think about the food and the
healthcare with nostalgia but that’s about it. Of course I miss my family and
friends but not to the point where I’d want to move back.

I think you’re dead right to be back in Ireland. The
rainbows, the atmosphere of the pubs, the Irish wit, the work mentality, the
beautiful landscapes and your family are only a few of the reasons why you
should be happy to return. I still wonder how you managed to cope with the
French for so long.

Thursday, August 01, 2013

Article on the Irish Times today
Au revoir France
They say moving house is one of the most stressful things you can do,
after death and divorce. We made the decision early this year to leave
our beloved France with our two children and head back “home” to
Ireland, a country where we haven’t actually lived in for over 16 years.
The decision was a difficult one as France has been good to us and we
have no regrets. Where we are living is probably one of the most
beautiful places in Europe, with the Med and the mountains within
spitting distance.
Yet, at the end of the day, it’s just not home. We have a close
network of expat friends whom we get on very well with, but most will
eventually leave here. We are constantly saying goodbye to good friends.
We swear we will stay in contact, but rarely do.
Our French friends are equally lovely, but they never really let you
in. We’ve had hundreds of nights out with them, perfectly staged dinner
parties with exquisite food and wines to match, but at the end of the
evening we’d often realise we had had little craic.
Our decision to leave was made in the depths of a very bad French
winter. Personally and professionally we both felt held back and
unfulfilled. Trying to run a business here in France is like beating
your head against a brick wall while the French bureaucrats watch,
mocking and deriding you. It really is that bad.
You realise pretty quickly that France only plays lip service to
Europe and in reality does it’s own thing which reeks of protectionism
and cronyism. On one occasion as we tried to get a business off the
ground, our Irish MEP, Brian Crowley, took our case to the Minister of
Justice because he felt we were being discriminated against as they were
refusing to recognise my accountancy qualifications. France’s answer to
the problem was to change the law, so I had to have a French
baccalaureat (equivalent of Leaving Cert) to work in my chosen field.
All that aside, life in France has been mostly good and we have been
extremely happy here. Now, as the mercury begins to rise, the doubts
about our decision, in direct correlation, are too. I’ve had sleepless
nights wondering are we doing the right thing for the children, now aged
six and eight, who are now completely and naturally bilingual. Will
they fit into the Irish culture? How will they cope with the drinking
culture in Ireland when they reach their teenage years, and will my
daughter want to start dressing like a pop star once she hits Irish
shores? Will we be able to handle the terrible weather?
Our beautiful house with it’s happy memories of all the people who
have visited us and the fun we have had, has gone under the hammer and
we must leave in a couple of days.
We will miss the sunshine, the wine, the food, and our circle of
lovely friends, but for all that, Ireland still beckons. It takes time
living away from Ireland to fully appreciate how warm, lovely, helpful
and genuine Irish people are. “There are plenty of assholes in Ireland
too,” my father warned me when I broke the news of our return, and we
know that we’re not going to have 320 days of sunshine. Yet, we want our
children to be Irish, to have that Irish sense of humour, to have a
healthy working mentality and to be surrounded by our extended family.
We want to be there for the good times and the bad. In a morbid way, I
want to be there for funerals, for sicknesses and the tough times as
well as the celebrations and the good times.
It’s au revoir France for now. Yikes!