‘Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that’s not what Rome is about. We should totally just *stab* Caesar!’ – Gretchen Weiners.

‘Gretchen, I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. And I’m sorry for telling everyone about it. And I’m sorry for repeating it now.’ – Karen Smith

‘Somebody wrote in that book that I’m lying about being a virgin, ’cause I use super-jumbo tampons, but I can’t help it if I’ve got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!’ – Bethany Byrd

‘Don’t have sex. Because you will get pregnant. And die.’ – Coach Carr

‘On Wednesdays we wear pink!’ – Karen Smith

‘Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each others awesomeness?’ – Janis Ian