Location: A far away place where one can read under the tall maple tree, feeling the warm breeze...

Gender: Female

Posts: 110

Do you ever find it hard to trust other people?

I find it hard to trust people as being my friend, because everytime that I find a friend that likes me for me, they end up forgetting about me and stop talking to me. So the whole friendship was a lie. And now I have so much trouble finding friends, i'm almost afraid of making new friends because how can I know if they're trustworthy? Or they won't stop talking to me because they've found new friends?

Whenever I meet someone new I'm full of expectations that friendship will come from it but am no longer disappointed when it doesn't. I'm as much to blame as them I suppose as I never give the expect social contribution to these relationships. I've learnt that apparently being a friend means saying yes to every social opportunity to refuse results in not ever being asked again. Though even when I do say yes I always feel my presences is surplus to requirements, or at least that was how I felt when I last tried socialising in my teens. Those are the years when all socialising seems geared towards mating rituals and when you're not considered part of the catch, you're ignored. Perhaps with the maturity of years people would be different and want peoples' company for itself and not as potential partner material for them or their friends. However the new problem arises that a lot of people are now paired up either as married couples or live in partners, so singel people tend to effect the evenness of the numbers.

I find it hard to trust people as being my friend, because everytime that I find a friend that likes me for me, they end up forgetting about me and stop talking to me. So the whole friendship was a lie. And now I have so much trouble finding friends, i'm almost afraid of making new friends because how can I know if they're trustworthy? Or they won't stop talking to me because they've found new friends?

I used to think this about certain friends that I've lost in the past. But recently I've started to realise that you can only really ask so much of even the best of friends. If it's too much work to keep in social contact with you because of SA, then your friends will eventually move on naturally. I don't think it invalidates your friendship though.

I don't know if that holds true for you, but it certainly helps me to be positive about friendships I may find in the future.

Accordin 2 my expectations I only have 2 real friends. Anyone else is an aquaintence that I really don't care for. When I call or text someone when I clearly no their off work but they dont answer they can go 2 hell. Especially if you've known these people since 5th grade!!!

Yes. I feel like I've met a lot of dishonest people in my life. It's hard for me to imagine that someone would be interested in me for who I am. My mind always creates reasons to be skeptical about people who seem to be friendly.

Im a majoooor cynic. i doubt people on everything they do...its a Biiiig problem.alot of people get annoyed with me allways questioning them and there intentions.

"Eckhart saw Hell too. He said: The only thing that burns in Hell is the part of you that won't let go of life, your memories, your attachments. They burn them all away. But they're not punishing you, he said. They're freeing your soul. So, if you're frightened of dying and... and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth."﻿

Yeah I find it hard to trust people. In school I meet this guy, during lunch time he came up to me begging for 50 cent, telling me " aw please, I swear i'll pay you back etc." The next day I asked him if he had my 50 cent since I needed them for the bus ride home, to no surprise he acted stupid not knowing what I was talking about and made up some half *** story why he didn't have my money. It's been a week and I still haven't been paid; I gave up already. This other girl did the same ****...

Yeah I find it hard to trust people. In school I meet this guy, during lunch time he came up to me begging for 50 cent, telling me " aw please, I swear i'll pay you back etc." The next day I asked him if he had my 50 cent since I needed them for the bus ride home, to no surprise he acted stupid not knowing what I was talking about and made up some half *** story why he didn't have my money. It's been a week and I still haven't been paid; I gave up already. This other girl did the same ****...

my trusting people was a major factor which cost me my last job. I "opened" myself up to them then I realized later when they used what they knew about me against me that I didn't even know what they were really like out of work. It wasn't too good. They were fairly intolerant of SA people. I couldn't stand it anymore due to the anger and fear of how I would be harrassed next. forget about my supervisor/boss. they knew all about me too, just used me as a gopher and treated me rudely like an imbecile.

mainly, you learn to trust a "friend" or someone, and later under different circumstances they violate your personal boundaries(when they wouldn't do it to someone they respect) and trust anyways, and think they've done nothing wrong and when you protest they call you the bad guy anyways.