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Tuesday, December 4

bum butt muscles

Just so you know, if you pull a muscle in your ass, participating in a Zumba class will not, in fact, help to "work it out."

Seriously. I wish someone had told me this earlier today.

On Sunday I went to Carberry for a kids Christmas party at the rink/bowling alley. It was great fun. The kids bowled, skated, sat on Santa's knee, helped themselves to multiple helpings of delicious snacks, and spent the afternoon with Grandma.

I had fun too. I totally kicked Mitchell's butt bowling.

But I pulled a muscle in my ass. I first realized it when I slipped around the ice helping my kids "skate." I figured that it must have happened bowling. Of course with my perfect bowling form, and refusal to hop in all the wrong places during my delivery, it's seriously surprising that I did some strange thing to a weird, deeply buried muscle, but I did. Go figure.

Today I thought to myself, "Self, you hardly feel that tender muscle unless you move around. I'm sure a round of Zumba will help warm up all your muscles and in turn work out whatever is going on in your buttock."

Self was wrong. I know, I can't believe it either. It's like, the second time she's ever been wrong. Ever.

To be fair, Zumba didn't all hurt, just the parts where we shook our hips, or bounced, or stepped to the side, or kicked our heels up behind us.

By the end of the hour it was all I could do to not visibly limp in front of all the old people. I mean, people who are slightly older than me, I mean . . . hey! Look over there! Something shiny! (I know that worked on some of you)

Needless to say, twisty, hoppy, butt-shakey exercise wasn't the best medicine. Now you know. Don't say you never get any useful information on this blog.