New Year Resolutions, Being Strong, Letting Go

The new year is coming and we are preparing ourselves for the things that are in front of us. Sven just wrote a tweet that inspired me to write this:

“In case you still need a good New Year’s Resolution: Stop doing things half-assed!”

Which is only half of the truth in my eyes, because you can’t just stop doing things half-assed if your clustered with stuff that you do half-assed. The art is to find the things that burden your life and to let go of these, so that you have more time and energy to focus on the things that are important to you.

And that is easier said than done. This brings me once more to Priorities. What are your priorities? Do you have a plan in mind or do you still need to figure things out? It is not bad if you are not there yet, but you should try to have one eventually. It is what makes the difference.

Sometimes I can’t see far ahead of me. In stressful times I can only see the next couple of days. When I’m really really good I can have a vision for the next 6 months. To imagine what the next 4 years are going to look like is an art I try to master at the moment. I can’t do that for everything. I can envision my business for the next 4 years1. I can’t envision how my relationship is going to look like for that time. Those two things are entirely different in my view. There are things where I rely on external guidance, there are things where I can only imagine a foundation. In those cases it is good to have someone else build the roof and the walls, so that I can fill in the blanks, hang the pictures, and color the scene. Maybe you can identify yourself with this, and if you do, maybe you can get an external guide. Whether this is your partner, a coach, a therapist, whatever, just have the strength to admit that you are not strong enough and let this guide help you.

Strength has nothing to do with external factors like rigidity or doing “tough” things. A strong muscle isn’t strong because it is inflexible. The opposite is true. A weak muscle is inflexible. When a muscle is strong, it is strong because it can let go. Admit that you are weak to become a stronger person.

Admit that you do things half-assed and be strong enough to make a decision what to do with these things. Is that thing something that you still really really want or is it just here because it was here all the time? Do you need an external guide to help yourself finish that thing, in case you really really want it, but are just not strong enough? If you don’t want it anymore, and you don’t need it anymore, can you be strong enough to let go? Can you have enough oversight to accept that someone else can see even further than you?