Now that awards season is over, Hollywood breathes a sigh of relief because not only can they all eat carbs again, they’re also free from the dreary restrictions of taste and elegance.

Halle? That’s your cue.

Halle Berry attends the premiere ‘The Call’ in Hollywood, California in a black top and skirt paired with Giuseppe Zanotti sandals.

Giuseppe Zanotti Sandals

Gurl. This has to stop. You’re so desperate to be seen as hot; so focused on the tight and the skin-baring, that you seem to have lost all perspective. This isn’t hot, Halle. Oh sure; maybe we’re not the best arbiters of what makes for a hot woman, but everything’s just so muthafuckin unflattering here. The top makes you look broad-shouldered and droopy-breasted, with a wrinkly stomach. The skirt looks like it’s eating you. The chain belt and grommeted lace-ups are two bridges too far. In short, you’re a mess, honey. And you’re starting to look a little crazy, to boot. It’s well past time to retire the smokey eye and the spikey hair.

This outfit just reminded me she was in The Flinstones. That is so bad.

http://twitter.com/foodycatAlicia foodycatAlicia

I disagree about the breasts – I don’t think they look droopy – but everything else is Flintstones Dominatrix and just has to stop.

Annabelle Archer

My personal feelings about her tend to infringe my ability to judge her fashion choices objectionably. I almost always think she looks like try hard, desperate shit and this is no exception.

Sue_Asponte

In general, I think she looks pretty awesome. But the only place I can think of where this look would be appropriate is a biker bar where you go to pick up men after your second divorce. So, nevermind.

RebeccaKW

I was thinking this outfit would be pretty appropriate if she was going out bar hopping on Saturday night. Very “Banger Sisters.”

Annabelle Archer

HA! Banger Sisters. Well done.

http://www.facebook.com/darva.sutra Darva Sutra

Exactly – she an Frau Klum together would be perfect.

Lisa_Cop

After that Julien MacDonald boobtastic Oscar party dress Heidi is in a class by herself.

queeniethebold

She’s so beautiful. How can she not see, or how can someone who might be advising her not see, how much less beautiful it is to be so dreadfully obvious and desperate? She could do anything with her looks and panache. i just don’t get it. Seriously depressing. This is unrelievedly ugly.

Maybe she just has too many people always telling her how perfect she is that she can’t hear anything negative.

BuckeyeLou

This is just Trashy! Totally unflattering. And she needs a softer hair-do as she ages. And I’d like to know the story on those scars on her leg,

Libby Larson

I didn’t think those were scars — I thought it looked like poorly applied bronzer, an opinion that was reinforced by the 5th pic as well.

teensmom99

All I could think of before I read your commentary is that it takes work to make Miss Halle look droopy breasted.

Lori

I saw the trailer for The Call when I was at the movies a few weeks ago. It looks, not good. In that sense this awful outfit is sort of appropriate for the premier. Maybe it’s intended as a public service. Halle fulfills her contractual obligation to promote the movie, but takes pity on fans and subtly signals them not to waste their money. OK, obviously it’s fair more likely that she’s just in some terrible bad taste/fear of aging spiral, but I’m trying to give her the benefit of the considerable doubt.

Monday1900

I saw that trailer too and I didn’t even realize it was Halle Berry until her name came up–although that may be a plus considering how the movie looks. Why is she doing what looks like a low-grade horror flick at this point in her career?

Lori

And why, for the love of FSM, did they let her do that to her hair?

http://twitter.com/Glam_Dixie Glam Dixie

Wow does she look like she has an extended torso and super short legs in that getup. Not good.

call_me_schmeg

this looks like it should be on a mannequin in the front display window at bebe.

EEKstl

It takes a Herculean effort to make one of the most stunning women on the planet not look great. What is with this suddenly chronic lapse in taste lately? PLEASE don’t say it’s because she’s getting older in Hollywood and is over-compensating to prove she’s still hot and relevant. It might be true, but please don’t say it.

http://twitter.com/Nancer Nancer

Sorry, guys, but I love those shoes!

3boysful

I do, too. Very unlike me! But they’d be cute with a simpler, less-trying-so-hard outfit.

Alyssa

I love them too, but not with this outfit.

http://www.serpentsdance.etsy.com/ SerpentsDance

Me too. I really do love them. I’d wear them with something a lot more subtle than her yabba-dabba-dom outfit, though.

MilaXX

The biggest errors for me is that top which looks too small, and as if the cowl showed too much and was then hastily pinned shut, and the belt. I would have given a pass on the tacky skirt and I like the shoes. I have no issue with the makeup, but which the hair was a little softer, and curly as opposed to spikey. Apparently Heidi & Halle are both having the female equivalent of mid life crises, which is sad really because they are both still incredibly beautiful women.

BrooklynBomber

Her hair is reminding me of a cartoon character, and I can’t think who it is. Anybody?

The shoes look like a very expensive version of awful.

DeebaCee

Every male anime character??

BrooklynBomber

Haha – could be. Though it’s a much older character I’m thinking of.

Laurie Bergman

The hair swoop sorta reminds me of the red-headed Syndrome from The Incredibles, though he is not decades old.

kimmeister

Maybe Hades from the Disney Hercules movie???

BrooklynBomber

Good call. The one I’m thinking of is from decades ago, though. Maybe red hair. Maybe flies or runs really fast.

kimmeister

Lion-o from the Thundercats?

BrooklynBomber

Nope. Thanks, though!

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1208138556 Sara Munoz Munoz

Plastic man?

BrooklynBomber

No. More like a kid.

halleygee

Mr. Heat Miser!!

BrooklynBomber

Ha! Not it, but that’s a good one.

BrooklynBomber

I love all the responses. It’s not Woody Woodpecker but I’m going with that because I cannot come up with the other one. It might have been an advertising cartoon character.

YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

Woody Woodpecker?

snarkykitten

Too be fair, the movie looks terrible

MarissaLG

Too 2002.

l_c_ann

I did not know she was reprising her secreterial role in the Flintstones for the (as yet unannounced) Flintstones 3: Quel Horreur!

schadenfreudelicious

“leather mullet skirt”…that should have stopped her in her tracks right there….

altalinda

Yes, I think it’s hot — but in a truck-stop kind of way. Halle, wake up!

Alyssa

Oh, honey, no. I had hopes that since the Oscars, you realized you don’t have to dress so tacky. You & Heidi are both beautiful women who need to realize how to dress in a way that flatters but isn’t desperate.

Indigo54

Oh no you di’ent!? Honey please…. Maybe it’s the minor emergence of crows feet around the eyes that’s making you lose your way. This is darn near B.A.P.S all over again. What would your mama say?!!!

Janet B

Head to toe: Fail.

Imasewsure

And the outfit makes her look short and stocky which is a hard they to achieve. I can live with the shoes for her if the rest of the outfit was better… hair ok, makeup has to go

dress_up_doll

Exactly! After looking at the first pic, I thought, how the hell is it possible for Halle to look so short and squat?

http://twitter.com/PhDKnitter marlie

This is insanely unflattering. And tacky. Oh, Halle, I don’t know what to do with you…

Little_Olive

In short, our girl Halle here needs an injection of class, STAT.

Belvane

Her clothes have been amazingly unflattering lately, but I have to disagree about the hair. If a hair style is flattering and age-appropriate, I don’t see any need to change it just because you’ve had it forever. On the other hand, if it’s unflattering and age-inappropriate (we’re all looking at YOU, Jennifer Aniston), then it’s time for a big change.

http://twitter.com/stellaphone Stella Zawistowski

Okay, Halle, you’ve still got it. WE GET IT!

OrigamiRose

When your hair starts to resemble Bob’s Big Boy, it’s time for new hair.

MzzPants

Hooker at the Thunderdome.

uprightcitizen

Ack. She looks like one of those dowager cougars who gets too much sun, smokes Virginia Slims, and tries to pick up younger men at inappropriate venues. She looks 15 years older than she did two weeks ago at the Oscars. That closeup on her feet and ankles in those frightening shoes is almost as unfortunate as the folds of skin under her arms. I hope someone shows her these pics, especially the zoomed-in ones. She’s still a beautiful, beautiful woman … but she needs an intervention, complete with detailed letters from others telling her how much her behavior has damaged them.

Adriana_Paula

What’s wrong with having folds of skin under your arms? You know, like living creatures do?

leave_Blake_alone

Can someone PLEASE pin her down, strap a weave onto her head and wipe her eye makeup off? At this point she’s had that look for 20 years now, right? Also, that dress sucks.

Trisha26

Halle Berry is never restricted by taste and elegance, is she?

zuzu

This is reminding me of her costumes from The Flintstones. And that’s not a good thing.

YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

How do you manage to make HALLE BERRY look stumpy?!

MaryAtRealityTea

It’s so depressing when you open the link and the first thought that comes into your mind is: ‘Oh. That’s bad.”

jmorino08

If she’s going to keep doing that with her hair, she’s going to have to get it trimmed every once in awhile. She looks like the Heat Miser.

lobsterlen

If I was a costume designer for a movie and had to create the wardrobe for a desperate recently divorced middle aged cougar I would pick this dress and shoes.