Cameron assures nation Britain’s gaffe reserves are far from empty

Prime Minister David Cameron today attempted to pour water on Labour’s accusations that Britain’s gaffe reserves are at a dangerously low level after being depleted by the coalition at an unsustainable rate over the last few weeks.

‘There are times in the life of any government when the gaffe supply comes under increased pressure,’ he said. ‘It’s a seasonal effect with demand peaking around budget time and dwindling to almost nothing during the Parliamentary recess.

‘But, together with the Liberal Democrats, we have shown we can continue to produce gaffes at an unprecedented level. We haven’t failed so far and we don’t intend to run out of gaffes any time soon. We can assure everyone we still have plenty in the tank so to speak.’

Though some government ministers believe the situation is much worse than Cameron is letting on with one unnamed source warning, ‘If the nation does run out of gaffes, the Prime Minister may have to visit the Palace. Not to resign but to see if Philip has any clangers going spare.’