Since “The Decision” was such a crowd pleaser on ESPN, how will LeBron James keep his next announcement more low key?A) He’ll do it by unfriending Pat Riley on Facebook. B) He’ll just fill out a change of address form at the post office. C) He’ll do it on Fox Sports 1. D) In the personals at the Akron Beacon Journal.

Speaking of LeBron, what are the Pistons’ chances of getting him to come here?A) Zero, zip, zilch, nada. B) About the same as picking a perfect NCAA tournament bracket. C) Or repeating as Kentucky Derby champion. D) Or getting bitten by a shark and a soccer player on the same day. E) So ... there is a chance?

Why is Prince Fielder posing naked in ESPN the Magazine’s “Body Issue”?A) This year’s issue is rated XXXL. B) Dr. Oz needed “before” photos for his miracle diet products. C) This time the “Bodies We Want” feature is sponsored by McDonald’s. D) It doesn’t matter. He’s over it.

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