Jay Leno returns to 'Tonight Show,' takes on Trump and Clintons in monologue

The former "Tonight Show" host tagged in after Jimmy Fallon "pulled a muscle," to deliver the NBC show's opening monologue on Thursday. Leno's barbs targeted a range of people: from reality star Kim Kardashian to President Donald Trump.

"Trump said he won't throw out the first pitch [at the Opening Day of baseball]. He's skipping the correspondents' dinner. Is he that thin-skinned?" Leno asked aloud. "You know, if this guy was any more of a p—y, he could grab himself."

"And where are all these jobs? Where are all these jobs Trump promised?" he continued. "You know, Sears just announced they're closing 42 stores. You know what that means? Lost jobs for 42 sales clerks."

The comedian also reprised his signature "economy is so bad" one-liners.

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WASHINGTON, DC - OCTOBER 19: Honoree Jay Leno poses for a photo with fans at the 2014 Kennedy Center's Mark Twain Prize For American Humor honoring Jay Leno at The Kennedy Center on October 19, 2014 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Paul Morigi/WireImage)

BURBANK, CA - SEPTEMBER 24: Jay Leno poses for a portrait at his car garage on Wenesday September 24, 2014 in Burbank, CA. The longtime host of The Tonight Show, continues to tour extensively performing comedy. Leno is going to be the next recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)

BURBANK, CA - SEPTEMBER 24: Jay Leno is interviewed at his car garage on Wenesday September 24, 2014 in Burbank, CA. The longtime host of The Tonight Show, continues to tour extensively performing comedy. Leno is going to be the next recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)

LANCASTER, PA - SEPTEMBER 21: Jay Leno changes clothes after performing at the American Music Theatre on Sunday September 21, 2014 in Lancaster, PA. The longtime host of The Tonight Show, continues to tour extensively performing comedy. Leno is going to be the next recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)

LANCASTER, PA - SEPTEMBER 21: Jay Leno performs at the American Music Theatre on Sunday September 21, 2014 in Lancaster, PA. The longtime host of The Tonight Show, continues to tour extensively performing comedy. Leno is going to be the next recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)

LANCASTER, PA - SEPTEMBER 21: Jay Leno is interviewed before performing at the American Music Theatre on Sunday September 21, 2014 in Lancaster, PA. The longtime host of The Tonight Show, continues to tour extensively performing comedy. Leno is going to be the next recipient of the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. (Photo by Matt McClain/ The Washington Post via Getty Images)

THE TONIGHT SHOW WITH JAY LENO -- Episode 4610 -- Pictured: Host Jay Leno reminisces on his 22 year run as host of the Tonight Show on February 6, 2014. (Photo by: Chris Haston/NBC/NBCU Photo Bank via Getty Images)

BURBANK, CA - FEBRUARY 06: Comedian Jay Leno appears onstage during a commercial break on the final episode of "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno" at The Burbank Studios on February 6, 2014 in Burbank, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images)

Comedian Jay Leno during an interview with guest host David Letterman on July 4, 1979. (Photo by Paul Drinkwater/NBCU Photo Bank)

Jay Leno arrives on May 5, 2014 for a demonstration in support of Women's Rights and LGBT groups across from the Beverly Hills Hotel, owned by the Sultan of Brunei, who also owns the Bel-Air Hotel in Los Angeles, in Beverly Hills, California, which passed a resolution demanding May 7, 2014 the Sultan of Brunei, Hassanal Bolkiah, sell his hotel in the posh US city after he announced last week that he would push ahead with implementing sharia law, despite criticism both at home and internationally. The city council said they will send the resolution to the State Department asking Washington to 'take appropriate action to condemn the Brunei government's policies.' AFP PHOTO / Frederic J. BROWN (Photo credit should read FREDERIC J. BROWN/AFP/Getty Images)

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MAY 5: Comedian Jay Leno participates in a rally to protest draconian punishment of women and gay people announced by the Sultan of Brunei outside the Beverly Hills Hotel, which is owned by the Sultan, on May 5, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. The Sultan of Brunei is planning to implement a brand of Sharia Penal Code which calls for the stoning of people for various offenses including homosexual acts, adultery, sodomy and extramarital sexual relations, a move that has been criticized by The United Nations. (Photo by David McNew/Getty Images)

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MAY 5: Comedian Jay Leno participates in a rally to protest draconian punishment of women and gay people announced by the Sultan of Brunei outside the Beverly Hills Hotel, which is owned by the Sultan, on May 5, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. The Sultan of Brunei is planning to implement a brand of Sharia Penal Code which calls for the stoning of people for various offenses including homosexual acts, adultery, sodomy and extramarital sexual relations, a move that has been criticized by The United Nations. (Photo by David McNew/Getty Images)

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MAY 5: Comedian Jay Leno participates in a rally to protest draconian punishment of women and gay people announced by the Sultan of Brunei outside the Beverly Hills Hotel, which is owned by the Sultan, on May 5, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. The Sultan of Brunei is planning to implement a brand of Sharia Penal Code which calls for the stoning of people for various offenses including homosexual acts, adultery, sodomy and extramarital sexual relations, a move that has been criticized by The United Nations. (Photo by David McNew/Getty Images)

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MAY 5: Comedian Jay Leno participates in a rally to protest draconian punishment of women and gay people announced by the Sultan of Brunei outside the Beverly Hills Hotel, which is owned by the Sultan, on May 5, 2014 in Beverly Hills, California. The Sultan of Brunei is planning to implement a brand of Sharia Penal Code which calls for the stoning of people for various offenses including homosexual acts, adultery, sodomy and extramarital sexual relations, a move that has been criticized by The United Nations. (Photo by David McNew/Getty Images)

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"The economy is so bad, the only people jumping the White House fence are contractors trying to get Trump to pay their bills," he said. "The economy is so bad, Kellogg's had to sell Tony the Tiger to a Chinese zoo. ... The economy is so bad, a family in Africa has adopted Madonna. ... The economy is so bad, Kathie Lee and Hoda have taken side jobs as bartenders just for the free drinks."

Fallon then joined in with a few of his own economy jokes: "The economy is so bad, Kendall Jenner just did a commercial for RC Cola. The economy is so bad, the CEO of Netflix is using his neighbor's password."

Leno's jabs didn't discriminate though, as he also took aim at the other side of the aisle.

"After Anthony Weiner's last scandal, he actually called Bill Clinton to apologize," he said. "See, that's when you know your life has gone off the rails: when your sexual behavior offends Bill Clinton."

"Speaking of the Clintons, last Saturday, Bill asked Hillary to renew their wedding vows," he continued. "Yeah. Well, it's something he does every April Fools' Day."

"The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon" was taping in Florida following the grand opening of Universal Studios Orlando's 3D motion-simulator attraction "Race Through New York Starring Jimmy Fallon."

LOS ANGELES, UNITED STATES: Show hosts actress Kirsten Dunst (L) and her fiance Jimmy Fallon clown around with a prop at the 2001 MTV Movie Awards at the Shrine Auditorium in Los Angeles, 02 June 2001. AFP PHOTO/Lucy Nicholson (Photo credit should read LUCY NICHOLSON/AFP/Getty Images)

Jimmy Fallon and Mary Louise Parker backstage at the MTV Rock & Comedy Concert at Battery Park in New York City, 5/10/02. The concert was staged as part of the first Tribeca Film Festival. Photo by Frank Micelotta/ImageDirect.

Comedian Jimmy Fallon perform at the MTV Tribeca Film Festival Rock and Comedy Concert in Battery Park in New York City. May 10, 2002. Photo by Frank Micelotta/ImageDirect

Jimmy Fallon jokes with and dresses identical to host Carson Daly on TRL at the MTV Studios in New York City. Jimmy will be hosting this years Video Music Awards live from Radio City Music Hall on August 29th. 8/14/02 Photo by Scott Gries/ImageDirect

NEW YORK - FEBRUARY 10: Actors Jimmy Fallon and Maya Rudolph attend attends the Marc Jacobs Fall/Winter 2003 Collection fashion show at the 26th Street Armory during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week February 10, 2003 in New York City. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Getty Images)

HOLLYWOOD - DECEMBER 8: Actor Jimmy Fallon arrives at the Warner Bros. premiere of the film 'Ocean's Twelve' at Grauman's Chinese Theatre December 8, 2004 in Hollywood California. (Photo by Vince Bucci/Getty Images)

Actors Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon make an appearance on MTV's Total Request Live on April 5, 2005 in New York City. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Getty Images)

Producer Nancy Juvonen (L) and actor Jimmy Fallon arrive for the premier of the film 'Music and Lyrics' in Los Angeles, California, 07 February 2007. (Photo credit should read ROBYN BECK/AFP/Getty Images)

NEW YORK - JUNE 04: Actor Jimmy Fallon attends Columbia Pictures' screening of 'You Don't Mess With The Zohan' on June 4, 2008 at the Ziegfeld Theater in New York City. (Photo by Rob Loud/Getty Images)

NEW YORK, NY - FEBRUARY 28: TV personality Jimmy Fallon attends the Museum of the Moving Image salute to Alec Baldwin at Cipriani 42nd Street on February 28, 2011 in New York City. (Photo by Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images)