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Gossip Girl Review: Call Me Serena!

If nothing else, the Russell Thorpe story line can no longer be called boring.

In the first installment of Gossip Girl's two-part season finale, Bart's old partner was exposed as a sociopath and possible murderer - one setting his sights on the ultimate revenge, holding the one thing Chuck truly covets in life in a precarious position.

Let's backtrack and break down how Russell and Blair ended up on the roof ...

Despite predictable developments and serious plot holes, "Shattered Bass" was entertaining for the most part and featured some terrific cameos and one-liners.

Blair and Louis' love affair is in full bloom, although I certainly didn't sense a lot of chemistry between them this week. Partly because B was seeing Chuck a lot.

She spends a lot of time worrying about Chuck for someone supposedly so enthralled with Louis, doesn't she? The writers sure glossed over Chuck's abuse fast.

Princess Sophie even had B tailed to prove that she was being dishonest with Louis. This begs the question: If she reveals her dark side, will he still want her?

He claims he will, but it looks far from certain. Those unsavory elements of B's personality are what forms the magnetism Chuck feels with Blair and vice versa.

Princess Sophie was won over, though, thanks to Cyrus. Wallace Shawn once again proved he is the man, and not just because of his Princess Bride reference.

Meanwhile, in thoroughly confusing Chuck news mostly redeemed by the return of Desmond Harrington as Jack, Raina called in Evil Uncle Bass. For REVENGE.

Jack then got in touch with Russell and plotted to take down Chuck, because Raina was to amateurish. Then Jack enlisted some thugs to force Chuck into rehab.

It's a good thing this was a setup - to trap Russell into rifling through Chuck's stuff with him supposedly locked away - because it was unrealistic on many levels.

Russell falling for it was amazing in a sense, but he was pretty desperate. The surveillance tape Russell wanted so hard didn't prove Bart Bass' guilt, but his own.

It was great, and admittedly unexpected, to see Jack take Chuck's side on this one, and noble of young Bass to let Russell walk with the same deal Bart had offered him.

Then Nate had to go and open his pretty mouth.

Having heard the truth from Nate, Raina called her dad to tell him he may as well be dead to her too. Betrayed, reeling and crazy, Russell hatched a plan for revenge.

Just as Chuck went to make a last-ditch effort to win over Blair at her public, royal debut with Louis, she was lured again by her star-crossed flame to Charlies' Place.

The roof of the hotel he's building, that is. Only Russell Thorpe awaited her, not Chuck. Will he bookend his career of torching buildings with Bass love interests inside?

Will Chuck stop him in the nick of time, only to win Blair's heart back from Louis? And is Raina's mom actually dead? We'll have to see when the season wraps May 16.

While all this was happening, Charlie went off her medication.

What she takes it for, why she stopped taking it, why she left evidence of not taking it in plain view, and how missing one dose made her NUTS in about three hours?

All very unclear. But that's where we're at right now.

After Dan invited Charlie to a fundraiser at Constance (which hilariously featured the return of Katy and Iz, along with those Gossip Girl fans who are like 12), Charlie freaked that she had nothing to wear, then showed up in Serena’s Cotillion dress!

This was absurdly awesome moment #1 of Charlie's story line: Serena's reaction and her cousin's insistence that it was a Nina Ricci number she bought once she got access to the Rhodes Trust Fund (another confusing plot element I won't get into).

Awesome moment #2? Charlie deciding she wants to get Humphreyed in Headmistress Queller’s office, slipping out of that dress like it was on fire, thrusting Serena-esque cleavage at Dan ... then breathlessly moaning for him to CALL HER SERENA!

Dan, understandably, backed off at that point.

While this would have been a top five Gossip Girl sex scene (maybe it even still counts, given some of the camera angles), Dan did the right thing coming to his sense there. The question is what happens next week when Charlie becomes even more unhinged.

Vanessa is coming to the rescue there, at least! Appearing out of nowhere and guaranteeing herself at least a 9 on this week's Gossip Girl Round Table, she and Serena called truce so they could share notes on Rufus and Charlie and her meds for some reason.

The more I write about it, the more I enjoyed some of the vintage Gossip Girl elements of this episode. By no means was it one of the show's best, but it'll be interesting to see how next week plays out and what note Season Four goes out on.

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Jen623•May 10, 2011 21:54

I was thinking about how Blair said that Chuck only sees her dark side, not the rest of her and she was unsure if Louis can handle her dark side. It seems like she wants someone who sees her, the good and the bad. I think Dan actually sees her. He knows her good points, he even voiced them to Chuck, but is completely aware of her scheming and her other issues, but still likes her. So, maybe Dan is the best guy for her, I'm interested to see if she realizes that. I loved the scene where Serena sees Charlie in her dress. I thought it was kind of strange for her to look at Charlie and tell her to "take it off". I mean, they were at an event, not her bedroom! I found that to be really funny. I am sad that Jenny and Vanessa are fired as regulars, but I hope that they will have the option to come back once in a while as guests. I never hated Vanessa, and really honestly don't understand why so many people hate her??? I totally saw Thorpe trapping Blair coming, I mean, he would obviously want revenge and Jack Bass told him that nothing messed with Chuck like losing Blair. I can't wait to see what happens next week!

Flawless•May 10, 2011 21:22

OMG!!!! just shut up with all that shit, damn bitchees, "i cant believe blair goes back to chuck after all he has done to her!" stop crying, bitches, he didnt do anything worse than all the other NJBC members!!! serena killed a man, thats okay. blair bullied people so long until they were ready for psychiatry, remember jenny,totally falling apart the first two seasons, or rachel carr, or nelly yuki, she got them all out of her way. blair having sex with two guys at nearly the same time..but thats okay...nate cheating on his girlfriend and future-wife blair with her best friend, giving his best friend up for a girl so many times, hitting and threating his best friend, because he had sex with his EX-girlfriend, and forgetting he did that too...thats okay...but then chuck comes along, sells B for a hotel, that meant the world to him, it was the most important thing besides blair, after he lost both of his parents, nearly lost his fathers company and his uncle tried to sabotage and humiliate him, he breaks a window while he is drunk, and B has a little scratch on her face...then you start to hate him?!?! really?!?!?! dont say that the others did things that werent that bad, cause they were!!!!! stop excusing all the others!!!!!!!! chuck didnt do anything worse than nate, serena or blair...we all know...stop acting like bitches!!!!!

Kathy•May 10, 2011 20:55

I still want DAIR!

ds•May 10, 2011 20:53

finally some exiting stuff is back in GG...why do they wait till finale?? I love BASS Men..I LOVE them...and Jack was great....so interesting to see him good evilin this point ;) really unexpected... Nate pretty tussie pls shut your mouth once :D next time just try to take her focus into your charm bb ;) Go Charlie!!! we definitely need a crazy bitch here...tho I prefer Blair, its enteraining to see some one goes crazy around there...and this was is insane better than crazy ;) Chuck fight for your woman man, fight as hell ;) you love each other cut the fight and make LOVE!! #teamdarkknight FTW!!!

Sal•May 10, 2011 20:53

It is so depressing that people love Blair and Chuck after all he has done to her.

Cara•May 10, 2011 20:25

Loved the episode! I love that Chuck is fighting for Blair! I hope he is the one to save her next week! Then they can go be Chair on chairs lol. I hope this is the start to his redemption. Charlie is crazy but she reminds he of old school Georgina before they decided to only use her from comedy and no longer as a hard core psycho.

joanne•May 10, 2011 20:03

Why are all the crazy bitches wanting to emulate Serena. Charlie is such a psycho. I bet those meds are anti-psychotic drugs. Why do they want her to be a regular next season. The show doesnt need another crazy bitch after Dan, we already have Georgina! I would like all the guys running to save Blair - Louis, Dan, Nate, Chuck and Jack. I would love it if Serena worries about Blair but I bet she will be all about Charlie. I want to see more of Eleanor and Cyrus! Love them to bits.

erin•May 10, 2011 19:48

True love means never having to apologize for making your beloved bleed. Team Twilight FTW

Allie•May 10, 2011 19:36

Loved this episode! Best one since before the winter hiatus, IMO. It was fast-paced, exciting, had twists that actually made sense but I didn't see coming. I loved Jack being on Chuck's side for once! And really, he was just fantastic in every scene. We need more Jack on this show. Charlie going nuts off her meds was hilarious, it's like Dan is seriously lacking in crazy chick radar. First Georgie, now Charlie... the nutjobs really love him. I'm excited for CB scenes in the finale, although I'm sad they probably won't reunite until S5... Chuck has a lot of things to work on then, so it's going to take time.

Chuck: So I thought I'd bring some luxury across the river. Brooklyn needs it. It's all bars, bakeries and babies. No hotel in sight. Charles Place. You up to attend the ribbon cutting?Nate: No thanks.Chuck: Still pissed I lied to Reina about my father?Nate: It was a big lie. Even for you.Chuck: That's why I'm stepping out from under his dark shadow and away from the Bass name.Nate: Whatever you want to call yourself or your hotel, you're still the same person.