I live in Barnsley but could get a train there... Can we all take turns sparring? 3 minutes each? if so I'm game...

Tertieried..thirded..whatever...i'm in London. I suspect Grandmaster will be demonstrating Ninja levels of invisibleness however. He has no personal students nor a public class so I suspect unless one of us is secretly his mum we ain't getting near his cellar dojo.

We can always put a piece of cheese on a string and walk around his general area. That should get the cowardly little fat mouse out of hiding.

Too bad, it would be a perfect opportunity for him to show off and prove the effectiveness of his martial arts. Surely us martial artists that have spent countless hours in the gym, training hard and sparring would be of little threat to this martial arts master...

I mean after all: "these MMA UFC crap, if you come up against someone like me who actually does fight, who actually can hold they're own and you try all this rubgy tackle crap you're going to get your fucking ass handed back to you. You're going to get your head kicked in."

I'm one of these MMA idiots so surely there's nothing to fear from me... clearly he'll kick my head in...

There's an unlimited combination of badass Oriental sounding words to create as many styles as one needs. Just as me, Dai-Hanshi-Soke Permalost of the Black Lotus Tiger Dragon Unicorn Yin Yang Aiki-Hapsambokijutsu school.