Finally! After months of mental prick and clit teasing, Julianne Moore has finally, officially, signed on to play the tyrannical mother in the highly anticipated remake of Carrie. It's not the first time she's taken on the classics — playing Lila Crane in Gus Van Sant's 1998 take on Psycho — and if Chloe Moretz in the lead wasn't proof enough that they're going to do a good job of it then Moore's signature certainly seals the deal. But what can we expect? Well, not the apparent cakewalk that was the original, says Moretz, this one is going to get darker. "It's darker and much more psychological. More Black Swan," she said. "You're really looking into her mind and it really looks into the relationship of Margaret and Carrie. It's set in modern time, so it's a lot different." [The Sun]

Mariah Carey is just the best. Rather than whore her twin babies out to the highest tabloid bidder she launched their very own website called Dembabies.com. Featuring an intimate family album of her playing with Morocco and Monroe, everything looks totally cute and normal — except for the fact that Mariah's wearing a formal dresses and shitloads of diamonds. Celebrities are just like us! [Dembabies]

Man, someone needs to remind Charlize Theron to take her ginkgo biloba. Showing the early stages of what is commonly referred to as Mommyitis, the actress says she can't even recall what life was like before adopting Jackson and getting hit with the memory erasure of motherhood. "I feel like I can't remember anything prior to him," she said. "I feel like it was always just meant to be what it is." [Us]Charlize and Kristen Stewart were clearly given the same memo when it came to dressing for the London premiere of Snow White And The Huntsman: "Sheer. Black. No, sheerer." [Radar]

Considering her drug and baby doll-clad past it was probably more like a real-life flashback than pedestrian anxiety attack, but Courtney Love freaked the fuck out at the scores of "identical blond models in pink nighties" who were "taking pills, writhing on a couch or smoking cigarettes" at interactive play Sleep No More's latest spinoff, The Forgotten. "You'd turn a corner and suddenly there'd be another girl up against the wall. Walking through, Courtney started saying, ‘Get me out of here. I have to get out of here!'" said an onlooker, another adding, "She bolted for the exit, albeit the wrong one — mid-performance — which did nothing to calm her anxiety. All these models acting like pill-crazed lunatics then came out of character to console her. She felt trapped and claustrophobic." It sounds genuinely terrifying. [Page Six]

If she has her way, Barbra Streisand is going to be the chart-topper of your grandchildren's generation. Proving you can't keep an icon down, there is talk she's going to duet with the likes of Rihanna and Adele. Which would just be the best. [Popdust]

Do you want to see inside the house that Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux will soon be sleeping and sexing in? No? Too bad! [Trulia]

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's new house is so big we're only treated to aerial shots. [E!]

Also, Angelina Jolie just splurged $1.6 million on a helicopter and flying lessons for Brad Pitt. Just cuz! [Page Six]

Tyson Beckford doesn't care if his jerk-off tape hits the interwebs. Which is promising in terms of size and performance. [Page Six]

An afternoon of drinking goes belly-up for Scott Disick, who spent much of Saturday throwing up into a garbage can in Atlantic City. What a catch! [Page Six]

By the by, Kristen Stewart referred to Robert Pattinson as "my fucking boyfriend." [Celebitchy]

The men and Sapphic ladies of Manhattan were in for a treat the other evening when Sofia Vergara and pals, including Jessica Stam, had a single ladies night out in the city. [Page Six]

Drew Barrymore celebrated her engagement to Will Kopelman by throwing an engagement party for 300 friends at the Press Lounge rooftop on Friday. Making like a Real Houswives castmember she served guests her own personal wine label. [Page Six]

In true Real Housewives style, Drew knocked a woman on her ass and acted like she didn't realize. [NYDN]