The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, February 10, 1916, LAST EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

f8S?--mLUNCH AND LITERATUREThe large and husky Mr. Moozehad recently been deprived of severalinternal organs by the surgeons andwas recovering so rapidly that hebegan to dream of hashed brownedpotatoes, T-bone steaks smotheredin onions, custard pie and other delicacies. The hospital diet of warmmilk was beginning to make himpeevish.Finally the nurse gladdened his.soul by the announcement that, to. day he was to have "some food."But the "food" consisted of a fewspoonsful of grueL"Huh!" remarked Mr. Mooze afterhe had gulped the disappointing"meal," "now you might bring me apostage stamp, nurse.""What for?" asked the nurse."Oh, I think I'll do some reading!"o oVALUE OF A HORSEIn an Ohio town there was a groceryman who kept the most emaciated-lookinghorse in the wholestate. One day the delivery boy droveone of the nags a bit too hard, and,finding a soft spot in the lower endof the township, the horse lay downJand peacefully died. ."I'm awfully sorry, Mr. Brown,"said the agitated boy. "I didn't goto do it""You are sorry, are you?" "yelledthe agitated Mr. Brown. "Well, isthat going to pay me for the loss ofthe horse?""No, sir," answered the "boy. "Iwill pay for the horse, all right Youcan take him out of my next week'swages."o oTODAY'S BELLRINGERClerk (to Tommy Atkins who hasasked to see some silver namebrooches) Here you are. Take yourchoice. Ethel, Maud, Gladys, PearLDolly any of these?Tommy Yes, all those but Gladys.And I'll have Polly and Alice too, iftyou've got 'em. Punch.SHE UNDERSTOOD CHILDRENMrs. Smith My new girl left because of our children.Mrs. Jones I thought you advertised for a woman who understoodchildren?Mrs. Smith She did understandthem that's why she lefto oCORRECT"What was the gist of LloydGeorge's plea for more munitions?""WarisshelL"-o o-6abml&tbRemember, girls, if you look at avalestine real close you'll find it don'tlook much like a marriage license,after all!