The summer bucket List
How to make your summer productive
Ah, summer. The season we all look forward to and dread the most. Some of us love it
and some of us can’t stand it. One thing’s for sure, though: almost all of us look back at
our summer in August and think how much time we wasted. Time does indeed fly, even
if you’re not doing a damn thing. Lucky for you the regret remains.
Yes, summer is a time for vacation, but you’ve got about three months’ worth of free
time. You can sit around and watch a marathon of Dexter later. It’s time to make your
summer more lucrative and memorable.

F

irst off, you should make a list of the things
you’ve always wanted to do but never
had the time. Maybe you really wanted
to take up painting or start yoga. Add it to the
list. This is your time and your opportunity to
add a new skill to your belt. Prioritize by level of
importance, and start fulfilling the list after an
allotted relaxation time.
While you start taking up some hobbies, it’s
probably a good idea to look at some summer
internships. Unfortunately a lot of them are
things you should’ve applied for back in March
or April. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t a
few left out there.
Internships are a great way to get your foot
in the door and it looks fantastic on resumes. Of
course, a lot of them aren’t paid (cheapskates)
but you can’t get a job without experience.

If you couldn’t get an internship or just didn’t
have the time to deal with it, you can always
take up learning a new skill. Try learning another
language. Three months’ time will give you at
least a basic understanding of a language. You
can brag in your next interview about how you
spent your summer learning a new language
instead of slacking off like most people.

take the time and effort you can learn how to
code too. Sometimes it’s not the degree that
impresses employers, it’s the quality of work.
Learning the basics of HTML and CSS could
help you in more ways than you think.
If you learn coding, you can eventually build
your own website and use it as a portfolio. I’m

You can brag in your next interview about how
you spent your summer learning a new language
instead of slacking off like most people.
Maybe you’re not down to learn Spanish or
French or German. You could always begin an
independent study of something that’s not in
your field. Computer programmers and web
developers are huge right now, and if you

not saying you could make a super-professionallooking website in a matter of three months, but
you can have a basic site up for picky employers
who demand online portfolios.
For a really professional-looking website,

just google how to create your own website
and you’ll see thousands of websites that can
help you out. Make sure to review them first,
though, so that way your portfolio doesn’t
look like a high schooler’s Myspace.
Summer can be incredibly hot, but it’s a
perfect opportunity for traveling, too. Use
this time to expand your mind and your
capabilities. Maybe that knitting class may
come in handy later when you see an opening
on a website for a marketing consultant.
Don’t rule out things just because they seem
like they can’t relate to your field of study. It
can help you in more ways than you think.
The more well-rounded you are, the more
attractive you seem to employers.
Celine Suarez

TICKET
GIVEAWAY

UWEEKLY

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May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

FOR DETAILS VISIT FACEBOOK.COM/UWEE
KLYAUSTIN

Storage options for students
Storage alternatives to avoid packaging nuisances

Congratulations. You’re almost done with finals. The long hours of studying and wiring
your body to energy shots filled with the constant drudgery of having to cover a semester’s
worth of information is almost over. And sadly when all you want to do is sleep, you still
have to pack and organize all your belongings and cram them in numerous boxes to haul
out of your dorm room into your car. Sounds time-consuming and boring, right? Well,
even when you still have to move everything out of your dorm, you can possibly avoid a
few other things: the cramped up space in your car while traveling, the hours of unpacking
your things once you arrive home and the repacking of everything once fall approaches.
Fortunately, UWeekly has a few storage solutions to avoid some packaging nuisances.

Your Storage Solution

car into the storage unit, so your parents and
wallet will be happy with your financially
conscious decisions. If interested, call 512213-4262 for available options.

Located on North Lamar, Your Storage
Solution offers numerous storage units
ranging from 5x5 to 10x30 depending on
how much of a rat-packer you are and how
much money you’re willing to spend. It’s
your typical storage option but a fair deal
nonetheless. The pricing is $40 a month
for 5x5 but offers a 10% discount and an
incentive of a first free month of storage,
leaving you to pay for the two extra months.
The attentive and courteous staff will also
assist you in unloading your items from your

CollegeBoxes
CollegeBoxes is an easy storage alternative
available for any student at UT. It’s free to
create an account and the movers come
to your dorm to pick up all your items so
you don’t have to break a sweat moving
anything. However, the only free pickup
date available is the 14th on Monday from

10 AM to 2 PM. Any other special pickup
dates and delivery dates must be scheduled
for an additional fee. Unfortunately, you
may also have to find some boxes because
it takes up to 2-3 weeks for the supply kit
to arrive. If you’re living off campus next
year, they also offer off-campus delivery,
but only for boxes, so if you have any
furniture or appliances, you will be charged
for UPS shipping charges. If interested, visit
collegeboxes.com or call 866.BOX.IT.UP.

for free. Just make sure to register soon
because it takes up to five business days
for the supply kits to reach UT. And don’t
worry if you plan to move off campus for
next year; they will deliver your boxes to
your new place. Make sure to sign up soon
at dormroommovers.com because pickup
and delivery dates sell out fast.
Alex Ramirez

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UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

5

Could you
really
handle
more finals?
Grad school may
not be the answer
Congratulations. You’ve made it to your
graduation after all of your hard work. It starts
to sound like a sorry tune after a while, but
you can’t get enough of it. It’s been the day
that you’ve been looking forward to and/or
completely dreading. You’re stepping into a big
new world of opportunities, but somehow you
feel like you’ll miss that routine of school.
Should you go to grad school? Is it even
worth your time? Most of us have the choice
of being able to return to school, but the
question lies in whether or not you’d sincerely
think it’s a good idea.
An elderly professor once spoke to my class
about how grad school is something you
should really want to do, otherwise you’ll end
up hating it. Although he may have been trying
to scare us, he did bring up a good point. Grad
school isn’t for everyone and should really be
thought through. I know it may seem like the
easier decision to make when deciding on your
future endeavors, but it’s not meant to be your
next step if you’ve got nothing else to do.

across opportunities on the way. Taking in new
cultures can make you a more well-rounded
person and it looks great on a resume. It’s
not often that you’ll get the chance to travel
without obligations like a career.
Try not to think of grad school as something
that you can use to put off planning for your
career. At that point you’re just prolonging the
inevitable. Not only will you have a Master’s
degree, but way more debt than you had when
you started. Back to square one.
If you think that grad school will help your
career in the long run, then go for it. You’ve
got to have that passion for learning that you
had when you first discovered your major. If

Networking with professors could give you a
huge boost in finding a career, but then again
it all depends on what field you’re in. Letters of
recommendation will always be a huge help, so
be extra nice to those professors that already
liked you. You’ll need those letters to get into
the school you want.
Don’t just go to the closest grad school either,
do some research and see what’s financially
and academically viable. The best school for
you may be in Iowa, but it may cost you a little
too much to move up there. Take advantage
of the friends you’ve got living around the
country, a nice visit could show you what kind
of town you could be living in. You don’t want

Most of us have the choice of being able to return to
school, but the question lies in whether or not you’d
sincerely think it’s a good idea.
Grad school is much more work than college
and requires a lot more time and patience from
the student. If you have to end up being a TA,
would you really be ready to handle a bunch of
kids straight from high school graduation?
It may be a fun new experience for you, but
you can also do many other things in those
two years that you would’ve spent in grad
school. I know this depends on your major,
but going out and seeing the world can be
a much better option and you can stumble

6

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

you never really cared about your major and
did it just to do it, then the extra work you’ll be
putting in won’t be as rewarding.
With grad school, you’ve got the potential
to learn something completely different
in your field. Building towards your thesis
is like one long research paper, but this
is something you cannot put off. It’s a
continuous process but you’ll get the chance
to network with some great professors
and
other
like-minded
colleagues.

to end up in a town with zero places to go to.
Grad school can be a great opportunity if
you really work for it. You get to meet great
new people, further your studies, and start to
become a true scholar. Even if you want to go to
grad school but feel burnt out, you can always
wait a year or two. The GRE will be a little more
difficult as time goes by, but you can see what
it’s like to have a free schedule without school.
It’s a lot weirder than you think.
Celine Suarez

Two for the road
Children or animals?
Summer’s here and I bet you all are ready
to burn all the books you couldn’t sell back
to the university bookstore. Although this is
a notoriously hectic time of year what with
finals and moving out of dorms and back into
your parent’s basement, it’s still no time to
forget about giving back to others and getting
involved in things you care about. That’s why
UWeekly has decided to give you an option
(that way you don’t feel so forced into altruism)
of charity events to chose from. So before you
pack it all up and hit the road, check out at least
one of these two great events coming up.

Party at Parkside
Down Syndrome Association of Central Texas
Is it just me or are more and more kids these
days being born with devastating diagnoses
like autism and Down syndrome? It also seems
like more people are suffering from illnesses
like cancer and tumors than ever before.
While the causes of these illnesses might never
be truly revealed (mainly because the government
doesn’t want you to know that they’re secretly
poisoning you), they still affect the lives of untold
millions worldwide. Even if you don’t currently
know any child with Down syndrome, at a startling
rate of 1 in 691 babies born with the disorder,
chances are you will in your lifetime.
This event isn’t just for those who care
for children, it’s also for the parents and
community members that care of those with
autism. As anyone who’s ever taken care of
an ill family member knows, to take care of
another is incredibly taxing, both physically
and financially. That’s why the Down Syndrome
Association of Central Texas provides help
and services both to the diagnosed and their

caretakers. So come and help those who help
others at this upscale benefit.
May 10, 7 PM, 301 East Sixth St, $75

Free Love
Emancipet Luncheon
Admit it: dogs are (hu)man’s best friend for
a reason. Even if you’re a cat person, you can
still appreciate the qualities inherent in a dog.
They’re friendly and loyal. They’re always
there and they love you unconditionally. If

What’s worse is the absolutely mindboggling practice of killing dogs at shelters.
Thank goodness for organizations such
as Emancipet, who offer free or low-cost
spaying and neutering operations in order to
help keep dog and cat populations low, thus
lowering the number of animals that end up
in shelters, on the streets or euthanized. In
order to celebrate their 13 years of service
to the Austin community, they’re holding a
“free love” luncheon and all are invited! It
will be sponsored by H-E-B and will be held
at the Four Seasons Hotel. How bourgeois!

“Before you pack it all up and hit the road, check out
at least one of these two great events coming up.”
only we can be as caring towards ourselves
and others as dogs are to us.
That’s why it’s such a travesty that some
people abandon dogs, abuse them and
throw them out like yesterday’s garbage.

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

So if you’re interested in attending, simply
contact Asha Thune at asha.thune@
emancipet.org for more information.
May 14, 11:30 AM-1 PM, Four Seasons Hotel
Amanda Chappel

May 15
Wouldn’t it be nice to eat as much as you want
and not gain any weight? Well, the people over
at Bites of Wellness are offering a “lunch-andlearn” series about eating out without gaining
weight. While it might seem easier said than
done, guest speaker Gayle Timmerman will
present key strategies and techniques to
keep in mind when you’re ordering drinks,
appetizers, entrees and dessert. Yum!
AT&T Education and Conference Center, The
Carillon (Private Dining Room 1), 12-1 PM

The social network
May 16
As Facebook, Twitter and MySpace have
taught us over the years, networking is much
more than just “liking” someone’s status.
In fact, networking is a very useful skill to
have when trying to make it in this tough
economy, or any economy. Unlike what most
people believe, networking isn’t about using
other people for your own selfish gains, it’s
about connecting with people whom you
can help and whom can help you. If you’d like
to learn how to take your networking skills to
the next level, this one’s for you.
Flawn Academic Center (FAC) 328, 12-1 PM, $5

Lavender Graduation
May 16
Calling all UT homos! If you’re graduating this

8

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

year and have a roving eye for persons of your
same gender, you’re eligible to partake in this
special and unique event celebrating the
accomplishments of UT’s queer community.
Graduates from May, August and December
are all honored at this program. To learn more
about how to participate in the Lavender
Graduation ceremony, contact Elizabeth A
Elsen at 512.232.1907
Student Activity Center (SAC) 4-7 PM

LGBT alumni reception
May 16
Calling all graduated UT homos! The Texas
Exes LGBTQ network is now welcoming back
UT alumni and friends to a nice reception
following the UT Lavender Graduation. This is
a great way to mingle with your fellow alumni
and show the ropes to some of the younger
kids. Remember, in the gay community,
fellowship is key. So don’t forget to RSVP by
May 11 with Ryan Miller at 512.471.7295
Etter-Harbin Alumni Center (UTX) Legends
Room, 5:30-7 PM

Last call
May 17
Third Thursday’s back for one last and final
opportunity to sweat it out yoga-style at the
Blanton. Even if you’re not into yoga, you can
always join in the book club or tour the museum.
Blanton Museum of Art, 5-9 PM
AMANDA CHAPPEL

Air
It
Out

CISPA is the
biggest troll
of the internet
What you should know about the bill
We all remember the horror of SOPA.
Then there was ACTA. Now we have to deal
with the Cyber Intelligence Sharing and
Protection Act (CISPA). It wasn’t too long ago
that we barely won the fight against SOPA,
but the sneaky bastards in Congress set up
another bill to censor the internet.
CISPA wasn’t very publicized, and
now it has been passed by the House of
Representatives. All of
a sudden people are
wondering what the
hell CISPA is.
I’ll tell you, it’s
definitely a lot worse
than any other bill that
censors the internet.
What you need to
know is that CISPA allows the government
to obtain information from websites that
they deem cyberthreats. That doesn’t sound
so bad right? Well imagine if they consider
Facebook a cyber threat. Your private data
and information will be browsed by the
government for security purposes.
What’s worse is that you won’t have the
right to know what type of information
they are collecting. Addresses, phone

numbers and credit cards are fair game.
Say goodbye to freedom of speech,
because once you are considered a
cyber threat, they will monitor you
continuously. CISPA defines a cyber
threat as anything that makes an “effort
to degrade, disrupt, or destroy” networks.
It’s meant to destroy privacy—ahem, piracy
altogether. It’s a damn shame that Congress is
more concerned about
taking care of bigger
corporations than creating
jobs for the unemployed.
This bill rewards
companies for sharing
information
with
the
government.
It’s
sickening,
and
companies like Facebook and Verizon
are actually supporting the bill. Over 800
companies are in favor and only a few have
backed out of their support (like Microsoft).
President Obama said he’d veto the bill if it
ever got that far along, but with the power of
the Senate and the House, it may be too late.
Contact your Senator and demand that he
or she vote against CISPA.
Celine Suarez

Addresses,
phone numbers,
and credit cards
are fair game.

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

9

Photo: Akira Kouchiyama

Shooting
the shit

How does Floyd Mayweather’s
win over Miguel Cotto affect his
status as an all-time great?
-Liliana Llamas
So glad you asked, Liliana, because
as a dedicated boxing fan myself, I hardly
ever get to write about the sweet science in
print form given boxing’s lack of popularity
in the mainstream, but this past weekend
was different. This past weekend saw Floyd
Mayweather and Miguel Cotto square off in
what was the best fight in boxing, five years
ago. OK, so maybe this fight was a bit past
due since everyone from Gotham to Frisco
Bay has been clamoring for a Pacquiao bout

people wanted to see from Floyd Mayweather
before he called it a career, and while a matchup with Manny Pacquiao is at the top of that
list, proving his ability to gut out a win was
among them. Never in Mayweather’s 43
professional fights has he ever truly been in
trouble or even really tested all that much.
That certainly changed when Cotto, a 6-1
underdog in some estimations, took the fight
to Floyd and put on one of the more impressive
performances of his career given who he was

In boxing, we like our all-time-greats to
have this little thing called “cajones,” and
Mayweather did everything in that fight to
prove just how “grande” his were.
and nothing else, but just a few years ago, this
was the fight to be made in boxing. Although
it lost a little bit of its luster, the fight proved to
have all the elements we would have possibly
wanted out of it sans the extreme delay.
For starters, there were still some things

10

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

fighting. The same can be said for Mayweather
as well, who displayed a tremendous heart in
standing toe-to-toe with the Puerto Rican star
for the first eight to nine rounds only to catch a
second wind and dominate the fight down the
stretch. In boxing, we like our all-time-greats

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

to have this little thing called “cajones,” and
Mayweather did everything in that fight to
prove just how “grande” his were.
The win was also that much more impressive
when you consider who the opponent was.
After all, Cotto is no slouch as he has a pretty
good chance of getting into the hall of fame
when it’s all said and done, although some
have been quick to write him off ever since
he suffered his first two career losses (one of
which got avenged in brutal fashion). Against
Mayweather, however, Cotto proved that he’s
still passionate about the sport of boxing
and is still among the sport’s elite around

154 pounds. Does the win do enough to
launch Mayweather past Pacquiao in the eyes
of boxing’s current pound-for-pound list?
I’m sure to many it will seem that way, but
before Mayweather’s legacy can totally be
sealed as one of the true all-time elite he still
has some unfinished business and it comes
in the form of a 5’6’’ Filipino congressman.
Even if the fight never gets made, however,
Mayweather still gets heavy consideration
for greatest fighter of this era and, in truth,
his mastery in the ring has supported
every shred of evidence to that claim.
Brian Bogart

Rollin’
the
dice
The final stretch

of the 2012 NBA season
As we enter the second round of the NBA tournament, there are still
many questions left surrounding this year’s basketball season. The sad part,
however, is that UWeekly won’t be here to share those moments as this is
our last issue for the semester. So instead we did the ballsy thing and full-on
predicted what the championship rounds of the playoffs are going to look
like. Your favorite team not on here? Well that’s too bad because chances are
they just didn’t make the cut in UWeekly’s farewell to the NBA. It’s been fun,
guys; either way we’ll see you again next year. Enjoy.

Western Conference Finals:
San Antonio Spurs vs. Oklahoma
City Thunder
Age before beauty? Hell, it just might happen.
While the Thunder currently occupy the
media’s special spot for teams they consider
“sexy,” the Spurs are just chugging away,
stringing together double-digit winning
streaks by an average margin of victory of
about 18 points. Um, hello? Why do people
keep underestimating the Spurs? This
definitely isn’t last year’s crotchety squad that
got manhandled by Memphis. If anything, this
Spurs team has been a revival of what made the
Tim Duncan/Gregg Popovich era so great, and
now that Tony Parker has been playing like an
MVP essentially the entire season, what’s not to
like about San Antonio?
On the other side of the coin, however, are
those sexy sons of bitches in OKC. If there was
still any doubt that the Thunder didn’t quite
have what it took to defeat a truly veteran team,
those doubts were quickly erased when the
Thunder completely dismantled the defending
champs, the Dallas Mavericks. Doesn’t get
much more veteran than that.
At the end of the day, though, I think I’d have
to roll with the Spurs in this series because, and
I know I’ve said this before, I truly feel this is
their last real chance to win a ring with the Big
Three altogether before Timmy D retires. The
Thunder will get theirs, and they’ll get it soon,
but I’m going to have to ride with the Quiet
Dynasty for one last rodeo.

playoffs thus far. With so many
of the top teams in the region
having a defense-first mentality
and with the number of the
stars going through a proverbial
revolving door of injuries, suspensions and firehydrant punching, the East just hasn’t been as fun
thus far. I don’t care that y’all have LeBron.
Assuming the C’s meet the Heat, however, that
should change as everyone watching would be in
for one hell of a chippy series because, shockingly,
these two teams don’t seem to get along.
Who could forget LeBron’s emotional release at
center court when the Heat exorcised those pesky
Celtic demons that possessed them by beating
them in the playoffs? While the Celtics have
continued to have luck against Miami throughout
the regular season, the Heat seem to flip a switch
(imagine that) whenever playoff time rolls around.
But just how good are these Celtics? Because
all season long I don’t think we ever got a
straight answer, and seeing how they could
be horrible against the Hawks one night but
absolutely dominant the next, I still don’t even
think they know exactly who they are as a team.
Even if the Heat have struggled with
some spurts of inconsistency throughout
the season, they have the athleticism to
make up for whenever they do struggle,
and at this very moment in the season, I feel
they just have a little more left in the tank.
I say the Heat take it in either six or seven, as
they will always have their problems with
the Celtics, no matter what the stakes are.

Eastern Conference Finals:
Miami Heat vs. Boston Celtics

NBA Finals:
Miami Heat vs. San Antonio Spurs

Let’s face it: The East has not made for exciting

It’s the rematch again, part two. Yes, even

12

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

though last year’s NBA Finals was a rematch of
the 2006 playoffs that saw Dwayne Wade win
his first ring at Dirk Nowitzki’s expense, Spurs/
Heat would be a classic rematch for LeBron
James, who got swept by San Antonio back
when he was with the Cavaliers in the 2007
Finals. Now LeBron’s a wee bit older, wiser and
with a completely different team. The Spurs are
still the Spurs. So how can we possibly predict
this potential match-up of basketball powers?
We can’t! It’s a damn tough series to predict
because literally anything can happen.
After watching the Heat lose to the Mavs last
year, it’s hard to pick them over a veteran team,
and for my money, the Spurs are the veteran
team in the NBA as far as I’m concerned.
Now, for the Spurs, it’s a matter of how their
Big Three will fare against Miami’s Big Three
(really, Big Two) and how much their bench
can contribute when it’s all said and done.
Even though the importance of a deep bench
is usually minimized in a playoff setting, that’s
just not who the Spurs are. They rely heavily on
their depth, and Gregg Popovich is not going to
make Tim Duncan play a full 48 minutes simply
because he’s the team’s superstar. The way
I see it, the Spurs have it in them to outsmart
the Heat in a fashion similar to the Mavericks,
but the main question will be will they have
enough physically to execute what they know
in their minds they must do to win?
My answer is yes, in seven games.
Brian Bogart

got a terrific matchup on Saturday when
Floyd Mayweather and Miguel Cotto squared
off for the welterweight crown. Throughout
his entire career, Floyd has excelled in not
only winning all of his fights, but by hardly
losing any rounds in the process. That all
changed when Cotto put “Pretty Boy Floyd”

If there was ever a team
that made me nervous in
the playoffs, it’s Kobe
Bryant’s Lakers.

The

Highlight

Reel

I mean I know a lot of people had the
Thunder beating the Mavericks in the first
round of the playoffs, but who honestly
expected Oklahoma City to also sweep the
defending champions? I’ll be honest and
say not this writer, as I thought the Thunder
had them in six. Now with a pending date
with the Lakers on the horizon, the Thunder
will have all the momentum in the world
as they continue their quest for their first

Baron Davis’ dislocated knee cap, Caron
Butler’s broken hand and, oh yeah, there
was also the ACL tear of a fellow by the name
of Derrick Rose. Injuries suck, but as anyone
will tell you, they’re just a part of the game.
But mostly they suck.

championship. Don’t count out the Lakers,
though; if there was ever a team that made
me nervous in the playoffs, it’s Kobe Bryant’s
Lakers. Just sayin’.
Sure, the fight may have been about five
years overdue, and sure no one really seems
to care about boxing anymore unless the
fight that’s being made is Floyd MayweatherManny Pacquiao. Boxing purists, however,

through what appeared to be the first real
fight of his life. All through his career, people
have wanted to see Floyd, at least just once,
truly gut out a win and win in a way that
was uncomfortable for him. Well, now we
know, and as far as I’m concerned, Floyd
Mayweather continues to sit comfortably on
the upper echelon among boxing’s all-time
elite. That is not a declaration I make lightly.
Casualties so far at the expense of
the playoff gods: Iman Shumpert’s ACL tear,

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

Just around 15 weeks left
until football season starts. Can you
feel the tension? I know I can.

Speaking
of
college
football, are we witnessing the
death of the BCS before our very
eyes as things appear to be geared
more and more towards an NCAA playoff
system? I’ve been declaring the death of
the BCS for the last couple years now, but
these days it looks like it might actually be
coming sooner than we think.
So the Nationals are currently one of
the top teams in baseball, you say? I think I
just felt the ground below me get real chilly
all of a sudden. And what’s that fat thing
doing flying across the sky?
Brian Bogart

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

13

Photo: UFC

Diaz and
Hendricks
earn title
shots at UFC
on FOX 3
The UFC’s return to FOX set up the
organization’s next title challengers in both
the lightweight and welterweight divisions,
as the company continues an attempt to
build pay-per-view stars through network
TV. Lightweight Nate Diaz won for the third
consecutive time, becoming the first fighter
to stop Jim Miller and the process, as the
younger Diaz stepped out of the shadow of
his popular older brother Nick with a second
round submission in the night’s main event
in New Jersey. Diaz will now take on the
winner of the rematch between lightweight
champion Benson Henderson and former
champion Frankie Edgar, which will take
place in early August.
At welter weight, former four-time
NCAA All-American wrestler Johny
Hendrick s became the top contender for
the 170 -pound title with a split decision
win over Josh Koscheck. The back-andfor th bout made Hendrick s a clear No. 1
contender at 170 pounds, but he’ll have
to wait until the muddied
title picture is cleared
up a little before he
gets his title shot. First,
champion Georges StPierre will have to return
from injur y to defend
his title against interim
champion Carlos Condit,
and that f ight likely won’t happen until
at least October. Still, Hendrick s said
he is willing to wait for what will be the
biggest f ight of his career.
Middleweight Alan Belcher also inched
closer to a title shot with his first round
TKO win over dangerous submission
specialist Rousimar Palhares, although a
title shot is not guaranteed for him. More
likely, he’ll have to take at least one more
fight in order to stand out in what has
become one of the organization’s deepest
divisions with the inclusion of former
Bellator champion Hector Lombard and

with fighters like Michael Bisping, Brian
Stann, and Mark Munoz knocking on the
door for a title shot. Heav yweight Lavar
Johnson was also victorious on the night ’s
main card, as he secured a first round TKO
over veteran fan favorite Pat Barry.
On a preliminary card filled with veterans

season last Friday, and the home stretch
in the organization’s six season got
underway with lightweight champion
Michael Chandler’s first fight since taking
the title from Eddie Alvarez last November.
Chandler took on veteran fighter Akihiro
Gono in a non-title “super fight,” and
Chandler passed the test
with flying colors, as he
dominated Gono in a
first round TKO, sending
the Japanese legend into
retirement in the process.
Chandler will now take
on the winner of the
season six lightweight
tournament, and the final between Brent
Weedman and Rick Hawn is set for later
this month.
Welterweight Bryan Baker moved
one step closer to his second Bellator
title shot, as he picked up a unanimous
decision over UFC veteran Ben Saunders
in the night ’s only tournament action.
He’ll now take on the winner of the other
tournament semifinal between Karl
Amoussou and David Rickels for a shot at
undefeated welterweight champion Ben
Askren in the fall.
David McKinney

Heavyweight Lavar Johnson was also
victorious on the night’s main card, as he
secured a first round TKO over veteran
fan favorite Pat Barry.

14

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

of “The Ultimate Fighter,” five of them were
victorious: lightweight Michael Johnson,
flyweights John Dodson and Louis Gaudinot,
featherweight Dennis Bermudez, and
bantamweight Roland Delorme. Other
preliminary winners were John Hathaway,
Danny Castillo, and Karlos Vemola. Endof-night bonuses of $65,000 went to Lavar
Johnson (knockout of the night), Nate Diaz
(submission of the night), and Louis Gaudinot
and John Lineker (fight of the night).
Bellator returned to its regular Friday
night after the only break of its 12-week

LIVE MUSIC

LIVE MUSIC

EVERY NIGHT

EVERY NIGHT

“The Whiskey’s on Ice and the Music’s on Fire”

Every Night With Live Music
FIND US ON FACEBOOK, FOLLOW ON TWITTER
AND GET #ONSTAGE WITH @THESTAGEAUSTIN

www.TheStageOnSixth.com
UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

Now that the Spring semester has come to an end and students can finally
catch up on all that necessary sleep after finals, it’s time for summer vacation.
Unless you’re taking summer school, then that’s a bummer. However, unless
you’re one of those college kids that heads back to your hometown to visit family,
here’s a list of festivals happening in Austin for those that decide to stay behind.

Pachanga Latino Music Festival
May 11 and 12, Fiesta Gardens
pachangafest.com
Celebrating all things Latino in music, food and
cultural arts, Pachanga is back at Fiesta Gardens
bringing this year’s Grammy-winning Calle 13
from Puerto Rico, La Santa Cecila from Los Angeles
and Girl in a Coma as well as local acts such as
Peligrosa and Brownout. That’s just the tip of
the iceberg. Also performing are local favorites
Maneja Beto and Tejano veterans Ruben Ramos
and the Mexican Revolution. Get ready to party.

School’s Out Forever
Rockaway Beach Party
May 19 and 20, Spiderhouse
Speaking of parties, this party fills over 50 bands
including Shakey Graves, The Boxing Lesson
and A Giant Dog on four stages surrounding
the “Best Patio in Town,” Spiderhouse. Also
celebrating the birthday of Joey Ramone are
The Converse All-Stars and Crooked Bangs who
will cover all of the favorite Ramones tunes on
the Rockaway Beach Stage. And when you need
to cool down from all the excitement and heat,
there’s always the Spiderhouse swimming pool.

not only the best folk music around, but
it ’s also a hotbed of ar tisans, vendors and
cook s. Don’t let the name fool you, as there
will be rock , blues, countr y and jaz z there
to soothe your ear drums. Showcasing
more than 1500 singer-songwriters over
the years, some of the greatest musicians
in the world have graced the stages of
the Kerr ville Folk Festival, including Willie
Nelson, Lyle Lovett, Mar y Chapin Carpenter
and Rober t Earl Keen, to name a few. Oh,
this festival also goes on for two week s, so
make it out when you can.

Revival Festival
May 26, Seventh Street and Trinity Avenue
revivalfest.com
It ’s the f if th annual Revival Festival
featuring rockabilly and Americana. This
year ’s headliner is the Reverend Hor ton
Heat, which is endearing, because Revival
Festival executive producer and founder
Orlando Rios stated on the website
that the band was the f irst band he
thought of when he formed the idea for
the festival. O ther bands on the lineup
include Three Bad Jack s, Nek romantix
and Holy Moly! Those that enjoy the
Smiths might enjoy Rios’ tribute band, The
Smites, also per forming at the festival.

Chaos in Tejas
May 31 through June 3, various venues in Austin
chaosintejas.com
It may be cliche to say, but this festival is not for
the faint of the heart. No, seriously. This festival
features a collection of bands in hardcore, punk
rock, metal and anything else that induces
mosh pits filled with sweat and testosterone. So
if any of that scares you, you should probably
stay home or head to some of the shows that
feature synth pop rock bands such as Sphynx
and Fresh Millions or bounce what your mama
gave ya with “Queen Diva” Big Freedia. Though,
whichever way you partake in this festival
during the Texas summer will leave you sweaty
no matter what.

this will be the first year for the ATX Television
Festival. Kind of in the same vein of the
Austin Film Festival, the weekend will feature
panels on industry-related topics, Q&As with
TV shows’ cast and creators and, of course,
screenings on classic TV shows, never-beforeseen episodes and new series premieres.
Kicking off the festival will be a night of USA
Network’s original series Suits and Royal Pains
with appearances from the cast of both shows.
Special guests also include a reunion with the
cast of Friday Night Lights.

Free Press Summerfest
June 2 and 3, Houston, Texas
freepressummerfest.com
If you’re up for a road trip, this music festival in
Houston has a pretty good and diverse line up
with headliners including Snoop Dogg and Willie
Nelson. Not to mention Flaming Lips, Descendents,
Primus and Erykah Badu. Something for everyone.

ATX Television Festival
June 1 through 3, various venues in Austin area
atxfestival.com
The city already celebrates film and music
through various festivals throughout the year,
so why not television? After all, several of
Austin’s popular fixtures have been featured
in movies and TV shows such as Robert
Rodriguez’s Machete and the TV show that
tugged everyone’s heartstrings, Friday Night
Lights. Founded by Caitlin McFarland and
Emily Gibson (both worked in the industry),

Blues on the Green
June 8-August 17
Every other Wednesday @ 7:30 PM
Blues on the Green is a great way to get
outside, get together with friends and
enjoy a big concert experience without the
commitment of purchasing a big concert

ticket. Put on each year by KGSR, it ’s also a lot more laid
back, relaxing and dog-friendly than other concerts and
festivals that roll through Austin.

Keep Austin Weird
5K Festival
June 23
Festival @ 2PM, 5K @ 7PM
Combining two things that Austin does
best, music and marathons, the Keep
Austin Weird 5K is sure to satisfy. But
why? Why combine music and running? Because it’s weird, that’s
why! While other festivals come to town and bleed Austin and
her citizens dry, this fest is meant to breathe life back into the
city and celebrate what makes her unique. Think of it as the
ultimate celebration of Austin’s essence.

Up in the air: Leslie Fest
June 24
There’s been a lot of talk about a “Leslie Fest” on June 24 to honor
Austin’s favorite fallen homeless transvestite Leslie Cochran. As
of now, there’s a lot of speculation as to whether this will actually

materialize. Not to sound crude or judgmental, but since this is
a festival organized by many of Leslie’s other homeless friends, I
wouldn’t be surprised if it just doesn’t come together. But here’s

Why combine music
and running? Because
it’s weird, that’s why!
to hoping that it does!

Quesoff 2012

July 21, The Mohawk
Ok, so this isn’t really a festival, but we’re in Texas. Who
doesn’t like queso? The three defending champions from
the first Quesoff last year, Frank, Thomas Lombardi and
April Henshaw and Allison Morgan will return to defend
their titles in their respective category: meaty, veggie or
spicy. Those wanting to throw their queso into the ring
should email their interest at queso@mohawkaustin.com.
Otherwise, show up and get cheesy. Yes, I went there.

Bat Fest
August 25
Although you can see
the bats any night of
the week as the sun
sets over the South
Congress bridge, it’s
so much better to see it in festival form. As with any festival, there
will be music, food, dancing and bat-themed activities. Oh, there
will also be a costume contest, so put on your best Batman garb.
Sarah Vasquez & Amanda Chappel

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

17

remember The
Alamo Drafthouse
When you think of keeping Austin weird,
you might also think of keeping Austin local.
When you think of keeping Austin local,
there might be a few key businesses and
venues that come to mind as unequivocally
Austin. If you previously thought the Alamo
Drafthouse was one of them, you’re wrong.
The Alamo Drafthouse at South Lamar
owns the entire complex that surrounds it,
including Heart of Texas Music, South Austin
Gym and many others. As the landlord of
the complex, it
has the power to
do what it wants,
when it wants.
Apparently,
it
wants condos.
The tenants of
the complex have
until the end of
July to vacate the premises and relocate
their businesses, some of which, like Whole
Spirit Books, have been there for 30 years.
Why the rush? It seems that the Alamo
Drafthouse has struck a deal with some
developers and plans on constructing
high-rise condos in place of the locally
owned and operated businesses that have
kept Austin unique for so many years.

What compounds the issue is the
location. Along with “So Co,” South Lamar
is considered a pivotal street contributing
to the local flavor of Austin. When visitors
come, they often visit this stretch of road in
order to figure out what’s happening and
to be a part of the local culture. A few years
ago South Congress Avenue was given the
face-lift similar to the one South Lamar will
be getting. Gone are the small mom and
pop businesses of So Co. With new high-

Photo: Julie Patterson

Nowhere near the franchise that is
McDonald’s or Whataburger, there’s still a
sense of betrayal by this business that was
born and raised in Austin. As a local business
keeping it weird, we as fellow Austinites
expected the big wigs to know their
customers and their demographic. Perhaps
we expected too much. The fact that the
majority of Austinites don’t want any more
high-rise condos, the fact that the majority
of Austinites do want to keep it local and to
keep Austin from growing too big too fast
are of no concern to the Leagues. Maybe they
don’t care. Maybe they’re just concerned
with making more money, as their business
has clearly expanded
beyond
film
and
cinema. Who knows?
But one thing’s certain:
Austin ain’t what it used
to be. We can now only
hope it will be better
than before.
Oh, and don’t even
get me started on the architecturally
hideous building that houses Alamo’s
latest location on Slaughter Lane. In a
town full of techies, design junkies and
other artists, I’m sure I’m not the only one
that thinks the Drafthouse could have
come up with a better design for their
latest complex.
Amanda Chappel

Gone are the small mom and pop businesses of
So Co. With new high-rise condos moving in, we
can only expect more of the same for “So La.”

18

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

rise condos moving in, we can only expect
more of the same for “So La.”
But is Alamo Drafthouse really to blame? If
one takes a closer look, or follows the money
trail, one can clearly see that the Alamo isn’t
as local as it appears to be. Although it was
founded in 1997 by Tim and Karrie League here
in the capital of the Lone Star state, it is still a
cinema chain that’s spread all over the country.

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

How to handle
rejection
It happens to us all

It doesn’t matter who we are attracted to, as long as we’re in the dating
game, we all have to deal with rejections. Even if you are in a relationship, the
issue of rejection and abandonment can still come up. No matter what kind of
relationship you are in, rejection still hurts, but the way you deal with rejection
can really shape the way you view yourself and others. It is also a tell-tale sign
of what kind of a person you are.
Unfortunately, some of us experience it more than others, even though it’s
a universal experience. So that’s why it’s important to know how to deal with
rejection when it happens and to hopefully stop it from happening again.

How to deal
Turning inward

It’s natural to want to shut down and shut All that matters is how we use the outside
other people off when you’ve initially world to soothe and heal us. Riddle me this:
experienced hurt and rejection. What’s Is it healthier to turn to drugs, booze or
worse is rejection often goes hand-in-hand other self-destructive tendencies to make
with humiliation. So, at the end of the day, you feel better, or is it healthier to turn to
you might have a few wounds to lick when friends, family, exercise or even therapy to
trying to brush off a bad dating experience. help move past your present block? I think
But there’s a difference between taking you know the answer to this question.
time out for yourself and self-isolating.
When emerging from your shell to rejoin
It’s also very important to analyze the the world of the living, you must always
quality of care you give yourself. Do ask yourself if your actions are healthy
you talk down to yourself? Do you beat or unhealthy. Most of your activities fall
yourself up for things gone wrong? Do into either category. When turning to the
you blame yourself? Do you harbor anger, material world for comfort, make sure that
hatred or jealousy in your heart? Turning when you ask yourself this question, you
inward is perfectly healthy and natural, feel good about the answer.
just make sure that when you do, you’re
It’s not them,
treating yourself with kindness
it’s you
and respect. Just because
Once we’ve moved
someone else doesn’t want
“The way you
past the phases of
to be with you doesn’t
turning
inward,
mean that you shouldn’t
deal with rejection
then
outward,
continue loving and
honoring yourself.
can really shape the way it’s then time to
refocus,
recoup
you view yourself and
Turning outward
and regroup. It’s
It’s completely healthy
usually at this point
others.”
to turn towards others
that we can analyze
for comfort and support
our actions and our
whenever we’ve been wounded.
role in the situation with

20

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

objectivity and clarity. Learn to take
responsibility for your part in this whole
“rejection” mess. How did you handle
yourself? Did you encourage this by
ignoring red flags, deceiving yourself or
others? Did you lower your standards or
compromise your beliefs in any way? Now
is the time to be perfectly honest with
yourself if you haven’t already.
It’s also a great time to analyze any
dating or behavior patterns you have that
lead to you feeling rejected. Do you go
after the same type of person just to be
met with the same fate? Did you go after
someone who’s all wrong for you? Notice
how you invited this situation into your
life and make changes accordingly. But
be patient, often times removing a bad
pattern takes time and trial and error.
Don’t be hard on yourself and take it easy.
And always remember that rejection is
a two way street. Although it sucks being
dumped or blown off, just remember you’ve
done it to others. Every person old enough
to read this article has had the opportunity
to reject someone they weren’t interested
in, and they might not ever know how
badly they’ve hurt others as a result.
Amanda Chappel

celine suarez

IDLC Pack for Skyrim
Coming Soon
Just when you thought your favorite game
couldn’t get any better, Bethesda (creators
of Skyrim) announced that downloadable
content will be available this summer. The DLC
pack will be called Dawnguard, and from the
looks of the poster, it looks like something
very sinister is coming our way. Of course
everything is very hush hush, but more will be
announced at this year’s E3 in June.
Hopefully it’s more than just weapons and
loot (we’re all secret hoarders). I’m also curious
as to how this will interact with the Kinect
features. I admit that I haven’t tried the Kinect
voice commands for Skyrim but why bother?
Anyone with a Kinect can tell you that face
recognition is shit and voice commands are
never accurate. In the trailer for the Kinect
features, Bethesda advertises that you can
do a quick save before making some stupid
decision. What’s the point if the Kinect can’t
even recognize what you’re trying to say? The
DLC has a lot to live up to.

Thoreau Makes a
Video Game
Out of all the ridiculous ideas I’ve seen for
a video game, this has to be the most mind
blowing one. By mind blowing, I mean
mind blowingly stupid. I love Henry David
Thoreau, I find his works to be enlightening.
Walden was a transcendentalist journey into
nature and highly philosophical. A group
of academics at the University of Southern
California were inspired by Walden so much
that they decided to make a
video game off of it. Yea
you read that right.
The game is
an FPS (without
the guns and
weaponry
of
course)
and
will take place
in a cabin in
Massachussetts
that’s fashioned
after the cabin
Thoreau stayed in.
Actions in the game

involve contemplating a bush, going fishing,
checking out the woods, and dealing with
life’s most difficult questions. I’m not too
sure how the questions thing is going to
work out, since Walden doesn’t have too
many people to create dialogue with.
In all honesty it’s flabbergasting. You can’t
discover self reliance and transcendentalism
by emulating being in the woods. The
creators made it clear that this isn’t
supposed to be a replacement for nature,
but more of an insight. I know gamers avoid
the sun like the plague, but this just takes
idiocracy to a new level.

Free Game: Realm of
the Mad God
Realm of the Mad God is a super
cool fantasy multiplayer
game that draws on 8-bit
themes similar to the
Legend of Zelda. If you
watch the trailer you get
to see how crazy this
game can get as far as
battling goes. Apparently
up to 85 players can play on
one screen, and with the type
of spells you can cast things are
always flying around in all directions.

Anyone
with a Kinect can
tell you that face
recognition is shit
and voice commands
are never
accurate

You get to play as a wizard, and you must
find your way out of Oryx’s (the mad God)
cavern. He intends on gobbling every single
pixel, so you must fight with your 8-bit cane.
The game was released on Steam in late
February and has been slowly gaining users
since. It’s available for download in the
Chrome Web Store too. You use W,A,S,D, to
move and cast your spells with the spacebar.
The tutorial is quick and simple and makes
you fight evil chickens. They obviously
understood what Link was going through
when those chickens attacked him. There’s
plenty of quests for you to go through as well.
All in all, it’s 8-bit goodness that you
can enjoy over the summer. We all know
you probably won’t be doing anything
productive anyways.
Celine Suarez
UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

21

22

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

leton

Photos: Jess Pend

24

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

e
& Michael Huerequ
Photos: EliWatson

Kappa Delta Chi ’s
Young, Wild and Free event
@ Karma

You’re
this week’s winner!
Contact us on Facebook
to collect $25!*

*If your face is circled, you’re this week’s winner of Barstars! Contact us Mon through Wed (9–5 p.m.) to collect $25 cash! (Be sure to Facebook us to let us know you won!)

UWeeklyATX.com | May 9. 2012

25

Super Crossword

Crypto Quip
This is a simple
substitution
cipher in which
each letter used
stands for another. If you think
that X equals O,
it will equal O
throughout the
puzzle. Solution is
accomplished by
trial and error.

26

May 9, 2012 | UWeeklyATX.com

the minimom

Clue: u EQUALS b

Sudoku

fresh millions
To clear things up, the name Fresh Millions is two words. Yes, there are two
Facebook pages out there: one with the name as one word lowercase and one with
two words uppercase. Geoff Earle from Fresh Millions explained that he first made
the page with one word before they played shows, but promoters ended up spelling
it as two words. So he wanted to change it, but after you get so many followers on
your page, you can’t change it. His solution? Create a page with the name as two
words. Along with this tidbit of information, Earle also discussed with UWeekly the
band’s start and people’s first impressions of the members.

How long as Fresh Millions been around?
Geoff Earle: That’s hard to say. We’ve had a lot of different
members. It may be because I’m too controlling of a
personality, but now we’re on 11 total for a three-piece band.

11 members?
GE: Yeah. Not all at once, but slowly. I think that it first
became a thing years and years ago when I was making
beats in my bedroom that I had grand plans to sell to pop
labels, because I had a friend that had an in who worked
for a pop label and asked me to make some. We made a
couple together that almost got picked up. Then I came
home from New York after this one trip where we made
one that was about to picked up, and he was like, “Make
some more. You know you can do it,” and that encouraged
me to do it. So I made a bunch of beats. None of them got
picked up. They were all a little too weird. A couple of
those are actual Fresh Millions songs today. “Forever” and

“I think people are turned off
by the fact that Cody’s really
built, which is bullshit.”

GE: Yeah. Maybe early on, I should have
switched the name of the band whenever
we started using lyrics and actual singing or whenever we
switched members the first time. But now it’s way too late
for that, so maybe everything I ever do will be called Fresh
Millions, because that distinction is no longer existing.

It doesn’t seem to fit you. I’ve seen
some of your shows. It’s very energetic
and a dance party.
GE: That’s part of the deal, yeah. But now recently, I started
singing on tracks. Nothing that’s released. There’s vocoder
on some songs that are out there. “Hot New Jam from ‘73”
is out there that has a vocoder and so does “Control Freak.”
That’s on the web. That’ll be on album number two as well
as a bunch of songs with me singing.

You are a pop guy, and I’ll be honest.
I’ve heard of Fresh Millions and I’ve
heard some songs and when I saw you
on stage, you were not at all what I
thought you would look like. I’m sure
you get that a lot.
GE: Why is that?

“Monty” are the two that are definitely from that era. I think
those are the only two that made it. I also have just tons
of crappy old ones that will never see the light of day, but
that was the beginning. Then we got a guitar player, my
friend Danny (Fuller) who was in the band. That was three
years ago. Then about two years ago now—yeah, almost
exactly two years ago—Danny left for New York and Cody
(Skinner) came. Our old drummer Mike (Fonseca) quit,
and we got our new drummer Dan (Skarbek). Also in the
brief in-between time, we had the drummer and the bass
player from The Sword playing in our band. Plus we’ve had
vibraphone players every once in awhile.

Because it’s a lot more funky and I
guess stereotypes. I don’t know. I just
was not expecting that. You know
Cody, he’s like athletic-built. I’m OK,
making funky, danceable pop music.
It’s weird to me.

You just had different extensions of musicians?

GE: Yeah, yeah. I can’t remember the name of the blog.

GE: I think people are turned off by the fact that Cody’s
really built, which is bullshit, because it doesn’t matter
if someone has muscles. I think that’s hilarious just
because of this guy’s physique. Anyway, I read this really,
really mean blog post about us this one time.

Really?

Fresh Millions’
next show is May
11 at ND Austin
with Rickey Jean
Francois and
Orthy.

Do you feel people have this misconception
about you when they see you? Like they get
thrown off by how you look?
GE: Maybe so. Oh yeah, that negative blog thing... It was
something I hadn’t heard of, but it popped up in my
Google feed. It was a big old hate thing about how we
were buff, and, like, “they should be playing football and
not making music.” I’m not even buff by the way, but we
both did play football in high school. I think that some
people do see that and walk out of the room, because
our jeans are not exactly tight. Well, these are. I have to
wear these for work. But our frames aren’t exactly svelte
and, yeah, I think that people have to have a certain
look to... Well, I’ve always been so vehemently opposed
to that, but the dudes eventually were like, “Dude, you
just have to dress nice when we play, please,” because
I would not think about it. Then wear my shitty t-shirts
and not like a shitty t-shirt that had a cool band name on
it, but the actual shitty t-shirt.

That has been through a washer a
couple of times. You’ve had it for years.
GE: Yeah, so I realized that image is important. On tour,
it was really indicative in hipper places. People would be
less into it. I think that’s true of anywhere with any kind
of music. People are more into music in Birmingham,
Alabama than they are in Williamsburg. There’s no
question. Shows in the nicest, most crowded places,
those people are jaded so to speak. Same here. We’re
way jaded. But, yeah, in Lousiville, Kentucky, people
were fucking amped to see us. So that’s not necessarily
this way or the other. But I feel like in more highly
densely populated areas, people would be turned off
by the fact that A) we’re really excited and B) that we’re
not very skinny, which, by the way, is total bullshit. You
should be able to be excited about your own music.
Sarah Vasquez
UWeeklyATX.com | May 9, 2012

27

Wednesday

thursday

Neil Young Hoot Night
@ Hotel Vegas, 1500 E 6th

No other figure looms as large in the
annals of rock n’ roll history than old
man Young. From country fried southern
rockers (Kings of Leon and My Morning
Jacket) to the introspective folk leanings
of the indie rock world, Neil Young’s music
is pure democracy in its eclecticness. Austin’s local music will band together to give
tribute to this old master’s rich catalog at
the very un-vegas like Hotel Vegas.
Tickets: At the door

Three Amigos:

All You Can Eat Tacos
@ Alamo Ritz, 320 E 6th

Before Steve Martin became a banjo-picking,
no-fun art snob, before Chevy Chase got all
fat and appeared as minor character on community, before Martin Short disappeared into
irrelevance, there was Three Amigos. A staple
of the ’90s comedy canon, these three former
comedy stars play naive actors who somehow
save the day from some evil banditos while
getting the chicas bonitas. Feel left out? The
Alamo will provide moustaches, cap guns, and
margaritas to help you celebrate the people
from whom we stole the state of Texas.

friday

Pachanga Music Fest
@ Fiesta Gardens

No doubt Austin’s music scene is a quite
vanilla-flavored one. Now we can add some
of that tasty mexican vanilla to that bland
Blue Bell stuff this weekend at the Pachanga
Music Fest. Forget the WASP-like Psych
Fest, ACL, and FFF; Pachanga celebrates the
browner side of life showcasing the latino
music community in Austin and beyond.
Grammy award-winning band Calle 13 will
headline the event; Los Lonely Boys, Alejandro Escavedo and more will serve as the side
dish to this mucho caliente musical weekend.
Tickets: www.pachangafest.com

No need to travel all the way to Bulgaria
to get a taste of Gypsy Jazz. Forget the
passport, just check out some expedia.com
deals to the eastside.

R. Kelly
@ The Mansion, 8110 Springdale

There is no better way of showing your mother how
much you love and appreciate her on Mother’s Day
weekend than spending an intimate evening with
her and R. Kelly at The Mansion. The fabled R&B star
will be performing at this venue that sounds like a
strip club (hopefully it is).
Tickets: www.rkellyaustin.eventbrite.com

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles:

Pizza Party

@ Alamo Ritz, 320 E 6th

A staple of any child’s salad days, Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles harkens back to the age of innocence when we
didn’t require 3D to be entertained. All that we asked
for was a little karate, skateboarding, and killer tunes.
Ninja Turtles definitely satisfies those above criteria
and more. Bonus Level: All you can eat pizza (don’t
worry, no anchovies) with your ticket and a surprise
ooze desert thing, mmm.

►►Also Worthy

Rock N’ Roll Karaoke
Beerland, 711 Red River

The Whiskey Sisters

Continental Club, 1315 S Congress

Michael Mordecai Jazz Jam
Elephant Room, 315 S Congress

tuesday

Blood Diner
@ Alamo Ritz, 320 E 6th
►►Also Worthy

►���Also Worthy

MSTRKRFT

Dat Boy Supa

Emo’s East, 2015 E Riverside

Red Eyed Fly, 715 Red River

Two brothers are guided by the disembodied brain of their favorite occult uncle to find
a virgin and prepare a blood buffet to raise
cannibal goddess Sheetar! Don’t believe me?
Find out for yourself at Terror Tuesday.
Tickets: www.originalalamo.com

Everybody was kung-fu fighting! Well, not exactly, or else everybody
would have been promptly escorted out of the bar, but you get the
idea. Kung Fu Saloon is a fun time on West Sixth that combines the
sophistication of the west side with some of the novelty that makes
Dirty Sixth so fun.
Loaded with arcade games, a fun atmosphere and 24 beers on tap,
Kung Fu Saloon also features a specialty sake menu. Not bad for a place
with the word “Kung Fu” in the title, eh? Hi-yah!

Brian Bogart

►►Cuatros

301 Lavaca

306 E 6th

1004 W 24th

Service Industry Night

$2 Domestic/Wells/Jello Shots

$2 Tecates and Modelo Esp. $5 Deer and Beer

►►Cuba Libre

►►Lavaca Street Bar

►►Third Base

409 Colorado

405 Lavaca

1717 W 6th

$2 Wells

Big Beer Mondays. $6 25oz

$2 Lone Star/Fireman/Shiner

►►Treasure Island

►►Bikini’s Sports Bar & Grill

►►Rain on 4th

413 E 6th

6901 I-35

217 W 4th

.25¢ wells, $1 triples and kamikaze shots, $4 bombs

$4 Big Daddy Drafts

$1.50 Lite Beers, $2.50 Wells

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Beard & Bang is currently seeking new talent to represent in Austin, Tx.
Send in your sample mp3s, music links, and other band info to Michael@beardandbang.com
If we like what we hear, we’ll get in touch!

Stylish Furniture Package Included w/ 32" Flat Screen TV in Each Living Room · Green Living · Wi-Fi throughout the community
24 hour Play Action Lounge · Concierge Service · Controlled Electronic Building Access · Elevator with electronic key access