I’ve been way behind in my reviews (seriously, how have my loyal but few readers gotten by without my recommendations?), so I’m slimming them down (maybe y’all don’t mind that) and stuffing them all into one nifty post.

First off, The Constant Gardener. Brits are upset that it didn’t get (m)any Oscar nods. I’m not upset by that. It’s an interesting/sad film about the corrupt activities of pharmaceutical companies in Africa, but not as amazing as the other nominees. Laura and I loved the love scenes between Ralph Fiennes and Rachel Weisz. I thought they were hott because it was one of those heartwarming affairs that begin with the couple arguing over some hot topic, and they wind up screwing because they respect each other so much. Still, the cinematography seemed inconsistent (at times it was trying way too hard to be avant-garde while other times was perfectly normal–it’s like a mix of Soderbergh and Speilberg). I give it a 7 out of 10, mainly because of the awareness it brings.

Secondly, Andrew Bird. I’m in love. His performance was nothing short of amazing. I wanted to cry though because the Fine Line was way too crowded and I couldn’t see a damn thing on the stage unless three tall guys moved their heads to just the right angle. So instead of crying, I left 40 minutes into his set. The man plays violin, guitar, and Glockenspiel, with another dude who’s name I’ve forgotten is on drums. Before each song, Andrew lays down some (usually) violin loops, which are played over him singing and whistling (a most inhuman whistle, in my opinion) and playing guitar or more violin. He occasionally plays his violin as a mandolin. Andrew, if you’re out there–email me. I’ll even drive down to Chy-town for our date.

And finally we have Hustle & Flow. For some reason when I look back on watching this Oscar-nominated (best actor, Terrance Howard) film, I chuckle. It’s just so absurd, yet realistic. This guy and his friends are so naive. Through much of the film, I figured it’d be one of those “look how hip hop gets us outta the ghetto” movies, but it’s more than that. It’s sadder than that. I can’t take it seriously though, it’s so ridiculous. I give it 6 out of 10 stars.

The song is not written by him, but it’s still very cool that he’s finally releasing it. I know I’ll download it from iTunes.

Available exclusively through iTunes, the song features choppy Tex-Mex style guitar runs and Nelson’s deadpan delivery of lines like, “What did you think all them saddles and boots was about?” and “Inside every cowboy there’s a lady who’d love to slip out.”

So there’s some gender insensitivity, but what can you expect from a cowboy anyway?

Bush Says Cooperation Thwarted 2002 Attack – Yahoo! News: “Under the plot, the hijackers were to use shoe bombs to blow open the cockpit door of a commercial jetliner, take control of the plane and crash it into the Library Tower in Los Angeles, since renamed the US Bank Tower, Bush said. In his remarks, Bush inadvertantly referred to the site as ‘Liberty Tower,’ and immediately afterward, the White House corrected him.”

Dumbass.

But here’s something kinda smart from a Republican: “I presume that if they did not want people to edit, they wouldn’t allow you to edit.”–said by Norm Coleman’s chief of staff, Erich Mische regarding the Wikipedia scandal. He’s right–why are all the lefties upset about this when editing is the whole point behind wikis. It’s biased to say that the government can’t edit posts about them.

I’ve used wikipedia to my advantage similarly. On the Stacia page, I added al ink to my blog. Sadly, someone else deleted it. But I was getting tons of hits from it, almost daily. Then I added something like, “Hey staffers: Stop trying to re-write history.” on Coleman’s page, which has also been deleted. This could be a hobby–adding little bits on random wikipedia pages.

In listening to the Ricky Gervais podcast, I learned that Brits like to call dicks “nobs.” But I watched Love Actually the other day (actually, the commentary) and saw that Colin yells, “And he’s got a big nob” (about himself) as he enters the gate for his plane to Milwaukee. Okay.

Calling their dicks nobs only perpetuates the stereotype that British men have small penises. I mean, a nob. A door (k)nob? Nob brings up pictures of short, chode-like objects, which is not good when discussing the male anatomy.

Make no mistake, Transamerica is a comedy. And it’s funny. Who knew? I didn’t know.

And Felicity Huffman is just as good as everyone says. She deserves all accolades possible for this role in this small film. As my friend Angie put it, “She’s so awkwardly beautiful.” Brilliant performance.

Honestly though, it did take me a bit to really get into the story. It all seemed a bit too convenient at first, but as it went on it became totally believable, though the circumstances were a bit outrageous. Not that a movie normally has to be believable, but when it’s a small movie like this that is so character-driven, I like it to be mostly believable.

I’d also like to make a related point in this post: that Oscar is hella gay this year. Let’s count ‘em up:Capote (gay man)Brokeback Mountain (gay men love story)Transamerica (tranny)Good Night and Good Luck (hilarious Liberace footage)

Perhaps there’s more I don’t know about. Regarding the Oscars, no big surprises in the nominations, except Good Night and Good Luck. I didn’t like it–it has no story, how can it be nominated for best picture? And how can the screenplay be nominated for best original when it’s mostly adapted from news scripts? Seems like a George Clooney fan club to me.

I’m also upset and surprised that Grizzly Man was not nominated for best documentary. It’s an amazing story of a completely nuts man who insisted upon living with grizzly bears despite not having any sort of education to back up his ideas. The kicker is that he’s killed by a bear (and no, that’s not a spoiler).

And thank God for all the small movies getting nominated. It’s about time. If only the Grammy’s would listen to indie releases now. I heard that Munich’s production costs were more than the other best picture nominees combined. Sheesh.I hope this is a new beginning for film where the smaller productions become more acclaimed than the stupid Hollywood productions, as they should be. Out with Spielberg and in with who knows??