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keeping tabs of a series of unfortunate dating experiences

What I Want .. Really

I don’t think I want a relationship with someone, I’ve become far too selfish with my own time to share it with someone else. I’m not sure how I would fit in the responsibility of pleasing another person.

This year is going to be a selfish one for me and as from September I won’t even be UK based anymore, maybe the men on the other side of the world are what I need, instead of these delicate London men who are scared to argue with you and just want to please you 24/7 because it makes their life easier.

So that brings me onto what I want. I want someone to argue with, I want someone who will happily tell me when they disagree with me, someone who tells me no and means it.

I’m bored now, bored of getting what I want at the drop of a hat. I shouldn’t be able to get whatever I want all the time without really even deserving it. I feel like a spoilt child when it comes to my love life, I need men to stop letting me walk all over them. I don’t find it fun anymore.

But seriously, where are the guys who put their foot down, who argue back when you make snide remarks at them. For goodness sake … why won’t you bite at my unnecessary bitchy comments! You know what the best part of arguing with someone is …. the make up sex. And if that isn’t something you knew, you’ve been doing things all wrong.

You know that scene from The Notebook, where she walks away from him and says she’s going off to be with someone else? Yeah, the one where he shouts and screams at her because he doesn’t agree with her decisions and what she’s doing …. where can I find that? I want someone to tell me I’m being crazy or that I’m a pain in the arse and I want them to mean every word.

Stop giving me this platonic bullshit of “oh I’m sorry you feel that way, I can totally understand what you mean, I was wrong” you probably weren’t wrong at all! But I like to push peoples buttons, it’s what I do! So if I try and push your buttons just to find that they’re well and truly off …. well that will bore me. Sorry.

Maybe it’s just me who wants that kind of fire with someone, maybe other people will be happy in their calm relationships, where both people just agree with each other all the time and can sail through life with no kind of passion or intensity?