Shame. Remorse. Guilt. These are the emotions that, alongside the smack, are coursing through the veins of Peter Doherty this week. Yes, the Babyshambles frontman has confirmed the phone footage of him shooting up last weekend is the real deal.

The Sun's top goth Victoria Newton, who is on fire this morning by the way (more on this later), not only assumes a respectable degree of decorum on the issue, but tries as best she can not to give in to the "nah nah nah ne nah nah" reflex:

"Our exclusive mobile phone footage showed the Babyshambles frontman injecting the drug last Friday, hours after returning to the UK from the MTV Europe music awards in Munich.

"The shocking film of Doherty taking the killer drug is a clear breach of magistrates' warnings he will face jail unless he stays clean.

"The troubled junkie's desperate fans have been flooding internet message boards claiming the video could not be so recent. But he yesterday ADMITTED the Sun was right and that the shocking scene took place just last week at his Wiltshire home."

To which we respond: Have you ever met a junkie who wasn't troubled, Vicky? And can anyone really claim this footage is shocking? Twice?

As for Pete's confession, it can't help but tug at your heartstrings. In a statement released yesterday on the singer's behalf, an EMI spokesman said: "Peter Doherty would like to apologise to the medical staff, fans and well-wishers who have helped and encouraged his progress in fighting his addiction to heroin.

"His ongoing rehabilitation was a source of such pride that Peter and those closest to him thought he was close to winning his battle with the drug.

"However, Peter sadly relapsed last week and is now looking to check himself back into rehab so he can try to continue the excellent attempts he has made to break free of heroin. He realises he has not only let himself down but has let down those who trusted and encouraged his efforts. He is filled with remorse."

While the patent sincerity of these words is enough to appeal to In the News's better nature, Vicky's tea and sympathy has run dry.

"He had only just dodged jail and is mocking the system that keeps giving him these chances."

Sadly for Vicky, we have to refer to Babyshambles bassist Drew McConnell for the final word on the matter. He blogged on this very site yesterday: "We're all fucked up humans, we all know that story about casting the first stone. I love my friends. That's all that anyone needs to know."

Don't think we've forgotten the whole "Vicky Newton is on fire" claim made just paragraphs ago. Here's the evidence:

Example one, in reference to a certain video shoot and a certain "troubled" singer who failed to turn up for it:

"Amy's burned more bridges than she has dessert spoons." Brilliant!

The story goes on to explain how Amy (Winehouse, as if you didn't know) has annoyed staff at Pinewood Studios by not showing up to shoot a vid for her single Love Is a Losing Game. Sadly none of the rest of the story is quite as good as that opener so we'll just summarise: Amy went AWOL, studio staff were appalled at waiting around for 15 hours for no good reason, but no one is very surprised.

Example two: Vicky is catching up on the old Prince threatens to sue fans story and alongside the copy - "Purple pain Prince is once again being, er, dwarfed by his ego by trying to ban his own fansites from using pictures of him" - is a picture showing the blacked-out silhouette of the singer with only his purple phallus of a guitar in full sight. As in "we can't use pictures of him so this is what we are reduced to". Fierce!

Sadly all that creativity leaves Vicky spent and from then on out it's all "Jimmy Page finds it hard to play the guitar with a broken finger" and "Alex Turner and Alex Chung go rollerskating"... Still, on the whole, good work today, Vicky. Fierce.

We end with some light relief from all this terribly serious news stuff, with the help of the Star's Kim Dawson, of Kim Dawson's Playlist fame. After revealing the troubling news that purveyors of melancholy indie the Feeling are planning on their next album being a cross between Donna Summer and the Who, Dawson also reveals that they recorded said album in the same studio as Britney Spears. "I didn't talk to her," says Feeling singer Dan Gillespie-Sells. "What would you say? How are the kids?" Well, it's a start Dan.