German fox steals over 100 shoes

A fox in Germany has been found in possession of over 100 stolen shoes, Reuters reports.

The cache was discovered in woods near the town of Föhren, in Rheinland Pfalz, by forestry workers.

The vulpine Imelda Marcos had apparently half-inched the shoes from local residents under the cover of darkness.

“There was everything from ladies’ shoes to trainers,” said an unnamed police spokesman. “We’ve found between 110 and 120 so far. It seems a vixen stole them for her cubs to play with.”

Local residents expressed delight at being reunited with their lost footwear, raising further questions about the provision of shoe leather in western Germany.

Food caching strategies are well known among foxes. The poultryman’s lament, frequently heard in anti-bloodsports circles, usually takes the following form: “You wouldn’t be anti-hunt if you’d ever seen what a fox can do in a henhouse.”

Foxes routinely kill more than they can eat: an observation that, to lay observers, implies uncontrollable bloodlust in the animal. However, discovery of unconsumed prey usually indicates that a predator was disturbed before it could carry off all its kills, intended for burial as insurance against future shortages.

Whether the German fox mistook the stolen trotter cases for food, or simply had to find the perfect pair of Jimmy Choos to match her coat, remains to be learned.