Poetry: 'Canis Gaudius' by Brian Doyle

Now here's the weird story of the week. Trust me, Nothing you read in the paper will trump this one: Our dog went on strike on Wednesday -- followed Promptly by every other dog in our neighborhood. It turns out they plotted it ahead of time; no walks, No chasing balls, no humping the legs of strangers, No sniffing butts, no eating dead birds in the street, No sneering at dog food and waiting for something Better to fall from the sky during chicken trimming Procedures by the careless man making the dinners, No napping on the couch which is strictly off limits, No long ecstatic scratching episodes on the beds of The kids who shriek when they find mounds of hair On their pillows, no quick peeing on the deck posts, No gazing intently for an hour at the terrified crows And sending telepathic messages about eating them Slowly feather by feather with a light squirrel sauce, No leaping up madly and crashing into chairs in hot Pursuit of flies and moths and one time those wasps, No sprinting for the door when someone says walk? None of that. It was really odd and sad. It turned out They thought we were taking their grace for granted. It turned out they were right. We swear to remember. -- Brian Doyle, Portland

Brian Doyle is the editor of Portland Magazine at the University of Portland, and the author of many books, notably "Mink River." He will read at 2 p.m. Jan. 27 at the Hood River Public Library, 502 State St., Hood River; and at 6:30 p.m. Feb. 2 at the North Plains Public Library, 31334 N.W. Commercial St., North Plains.

Submissions to the Poetry column may be emailed to poetry@oregonian.com or addressed to Poetry, The Oregonian, 1320 S.W. Broadway, Portland, OR 97201. Please include a self-addressed stamped envelope and/or full contact information (email address, phone number and postal address). If your work is selected for the column, you will be contacted. All poems are read; only those chosen for publication will receive a reply.