Thursday, June 21, 2007

The Urkobold in Art

Ah, yes. Bernini's Anima dannata or "Damned Soul". Sculpted in 1619 in white marble and now housed at the Spanish embassy, Palazzo di Spagna, Rome, Anima dannata is frequently believed to represent a soul damned to hell. This belief is mistaken. In actuality, it's a self-portrait of Bernini after a brief encounter with the Urkobold.

Here, we have represented the piece with a modern art flair, just to piss off Bernini's shade a little bit more. The Urkobold has had it in for Bernini ever since Bernini gave the chair that the Urkobold commissioned to some pope.

For your aesthetic enjoyment. Feel his pain, and, through the reflected emotion of the piece, try to see and hear the Urkobold in action.

6 comments:

I always liked this sculpture--Bernini was great. Back when I was the webmaster (and a director) for a local nonprofit, we had toyed with the idea of doing a Halloween event called, Dormir con los Muertos, which was to be an all-nighter at our supposedly haunted building. I played around with the Anima dannata image, with this being a test of the various effects that I could do in Paint Shop Pro. I ended up superimposing the image on the building.

You know, jimmydageek could use the center image (the head-on, undistorted photo of the sculpture) for the bibertarian shirt. Just insert a pacifier and some text and voilà! The horror expressed on the face says it all, doesn't it?

I tried to look up a full-sized picture of this statue and so Googled "anima damnata." That is, apparently, the name of a Polish death-metal band. Thought y'all would like to know.

Bernini was always my favorite. I dragged my husband over a five mile hilly Roman sidewalk to see "The Ecstasy of St. Theresa" when we were on our honeymoon. The Bargello was being remodelled so we missed the Classical subjects in Florence. Still, nobody made marble live like he did.

Oh, and this thread is vaguely art-related. I don't have the same horror-response to Thomas Kinkaide that other people do, believing there's a place in the world for inoffensive landscapes. Still, that particular picture is screwed up. Note the sun being over the gable on the far right side of the frame, but the sun splotches on the lawn being perpendicular to it. How does that work?

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Taktix®: - Details are still coming in, but it appears that he signed on recently merely for the opportunity to "really stick it to the Urkobold."

BakedPenguin - Said to be even tastier than barbecued puffin, he has been spotted plotting against the Urkobold, real name: Cornjob Crapulent Purpleknob, but you can call him "Corny"

Viking Moose - The Ruminator, the Angry Economist, his plot to destroy the Urkobold has just taken shape

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Sage - Resident Straight Man (that term is understood to be relative), he is the progenitor of Haiku Day, a much respected man, he tries to stab the Urkobold in the back on any occasion

Pro Libertate - The Guzzler, Gator, God, Discoverer of the Urkobold, he is the unabashed geek-lover of Mrs. Libertate, Judas to our savior Urkobold

Koko, the Signing Gorilla - Fine Animal Person Gorilla

Jimmy Da Geek - The Art Director, he is the safe cycling expert, obsessed with taints, his attempts to poison the Urkobold have all failed

Mr Steven Crane - The Dark Horse, the bearer of Nehi Cola and Formula 409. sometimes known as the Fairy Defense Force, surely the most likely to betray the Urkobold

highnumber - The Founder, he is a handsome devil, loves accents of all sorts except Californian, is a proven replicant, and is an accused Betrayer of Monkey Tuesday, the last one the Urkobold suspects, therefore probably the one to fear most

Nick M. - The Continuity Director, he determines what Urkobold lore is canon and what apocryphal, he probably doesn't belong on the sidebar

smacky - Filling the gender gap at Urkobold™. Trails Koko, the Signing Gorilla in a recent attractiveness poll by only a small margin of votes

dhex - The Wild Card, Arbiter of Taste, AKA Acid Damage McGee, some suspect that he is also the Technoviking, not trusted by the Urkobold due to his shifting loyalties

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