I wonder if Urkel is going to catch any heat from the Tree Hugger Crowd, or maybe even some criminal sanctions from the EPA for breaking the CFRs regarding the scattering of ashes...(Twice, no less...)

Burial at sea of human remains that are not cremated shall take place at least 3 nautical miles from land and in water at least 600 feet deep. Certain areas, including east central Florida, the Dry Tortugas, Florida and west of Pensacola, Florida to the Mississippi River Delta, require water at least 1800 feet deep. Refer to the Code of Federal Regulations at 40 CFR 229.1 for details. All necessary measures shall be taken to ensure that the remains sink to the bottom rapidly and permanently.

Disposal location and measures - Cremated remains

Cremated remains shall be buried in or on ocean waters without regard to the depth limitations specified for non-cremated remains in paragraph 2 above provided that such burial takes place at least three nautical miles from land.

(This might be the second offense..."Secret Service security keeps a close watch as Obama, oldest daughter Malia and sister Maya Soetoro-Ng, among others, make their way down to the rocky shoreline. Together, they spread the ashes of Madelyn Dunham. It's the same spot Obama paid tribute to his mother last August. She died in 1995."This seems to me to imply they scattered his mother's ashes here also...)

Where is the EPA on this? Where is the Mainstream Media?

As noted earlier, this guys can get away with anything...Will the media honeymoon ever end?

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Partial list of campaign promises from Barry "Don't use my middle name" Obama:(These are direct quotes from speeches during the campaign, and my comments in blue.)

"give a tax break to 95 percent of Americans who work every day and get taxes taken out of their paycheck every week";

We'll see how this one plays out... (I'm curious what you're going to do for the folks who don't work every day and instead collect that nice fat EBT card every week.)

"eliminate income taxes on Social Security for seniors making under $50,000";

Huh? Non-promise. Eliminate taxes on Social Security? WTF?

"give homeowners and working parents additional tax breaks";

Does it count if the house is in foreclosure? And do I get an additional break for each house I have in foreclosure?

not increase taxes on anyone if they "make under $250,000; you will not see your taxes increase by a single dime –- not your income taxes, not your payroll tax, not your capital gains tax";

I'll be holding my breath here...

"end those breaks to companies that ship jobs overseas";

Which breaks are you talking about?

"give tax breaks to companies that invest right here in the United States";

Invest? Invest how?

"eliminate capital gains taxes for small businesses and start-up companies that are the engine of job creation in this country";Small business and start-ups don't usually have to deal with capital gains... Usually they are barely eking out enough $ to pay their (few) employees.

"create two million new jobs by rebuilding our crumbling roads, and bridges, and schools -- by laying broadband lines to reach every corner of the country";

So, let me get this right... You are going to make construction companies hire unskilled labor to build bridges, schools and lay fiber optic cables? You sure about this?

"invest $15 billion a year in renewable sources of energy to create five million new energy jobs over the next decade";

Huh? 15 Billion a year, to create 5 million jobs over the next 10 years?

"reopen old factories, old plants, to build solar panels, and wind turbines";

Lovely. Have you looked at the efficiency information of solar and wind?You'd have to cover every square foot of land (not just vacant land, Jocko) in Duval County with solar panels in order to generate 10 percent of the daily power needs for the city of Jacksonville.And wind turbines are even worse.

build "a new electricity grid";Huh? Why do we need a "new grid"?

"build the fuel efficient cars of tomorrow";

Who? Your boys in the UAW? Ok... Will we be able to afford them? And even more important, will they be worth a damn?

"eliminate the oil we import from the Middle East in 10 years";

Eliminate? Without either coming up with a new domestic source (Hello? Offshore drilling in FL) or coming up with an efficient alternative energy source (ahem! Nuclear Power, dumbass.) it just isn't gonna happen.

"lower premiums" for those who already have health insurance;

I'll be over here, holding my breath on this one too.

"if you don't have health insurance, you'll be able to get the same kind of health insurance that members of Congress give themselves";

Again, let's see how you plan to engineer this one...

"end discrimination by insurance companies to the sick and those who need care the most";

So, you plan on nationalizing the health care system and changing the complete methodology for covering people...

"invest in early childhood education";

Like Headstart? Like all the other entitlement programs that most of the $$$ wind up in the pockets of the administrators and planners and hanger's-on. Very little money actually makes it to the actual classroom.

"recruit an army of new teachers";

Recruit? Better figure out a way to pay them more than a Pizza Hut delivery driver.

"pay our teachers higher salaries, give them more support. But ... also demand higher standards and more accountability";

Yeah... And your are going to get the money where? And how are you going to appease the NEA?

"make a deal with every young person who's here and every young person in America: If you are willing to commit yourself to national service, whether it's serving in our military or in the Peace Corps, working in a veterans home or a homeless shelter, then we will guarantee that you can afford to go to college no ifs ands or buts";

Waiting...waiting...

"stop spending $10 billion a month in Iraq while the Iraqis have a huge surplus";

Better check your math... It's not 10 billion a month.

"end this war in Iraq";Ok. Let me know how that is going to work... You got a magic wand?

"finish the fight and snuff out al Qaeda and bin Laden";Hmmmm... Better keep that magic wand close at hand.

"increase our ground troops and our investments in the finest fighting force in the world";

But not spend that 10 Billion a month... How much are you going to spend?

"invest in 21st century technologies so that our men and women have the best training and equipment when they deploy into combat and the care and benefits they have earned when they come home";What money are you going to invest? That 10 Billion you aren't spending in Iraq?

"No more homeless veterans"; and

Why just take care of the homeless vets? What about other homeless folks?

"no more fighting for disability payments."

Boy, between revamping the entire health care system, and the insurance system and now the whole Veterans Administration system, you have your work cut out for you. But look at the bright side- your are creating jobs for over a million new government workers to oversee and administer all this new bureaucracy.

Hey- how about this: A government workforce quid pro quo.For every new government job you create, you have to eliminate one that is no longer needed.I know it would be tough, but an American business has to cull its workforce when it can't afford them all... Why should the gummint be different?

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

If I get audited by the IRS I'm going to use the same defense."I had a look. It all looks good to me. Don't worry about it."

Think it would fly?

Then why should we turn a blind eye to The One's assertion?

By the way, what about the comment that if Blago appointed Urkel's choice, all he'd get would be "appreciation"?Doesn't that imply that a conversation regarding "compensation" took place?Regardless of outcome, (quid pro quo or not) wouldn't it be logical and, dare I say, they have a moral responsibility to report Blago to the Attorney General regarding his efforts?

I guess not.If you are The One, you are immune to any kind of accountability for any wrongdoing. TBG - ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

So, Al... How does this fit into your graphs, charts and doom shouting? I know all the folks in the Dakotas were counting on your predictions so they'd have palm trees and mojitos on the front porch in January this year.

I would suggest using something other than the Weather Channel for your forecasting needs... 'Cause these jerkoffs don't know shit about weather.

I don't know if y'all noticed it but they are changing the glow-bull warmening buzzwords-They don't call it "Global Warming" any more; They refer to it as "Anthropomorphic Climate Change", that way they can point to any abberation in the weather cycle and scream about the demise of the Earth unless this or that industry, occupation, task or pastime is measured, calibrated, taxed, and regulated out of existence.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Love is thoughtful and kind. Love knows the difference between' its' and' it's'...Love may 'preserve', but I'd give it 15 minutes in a canning bath so it might also persevere.Love needs to be kept clean lest the words become illegible.Love transcends stupid people getting stupid tattoos in stupid places.

...You've seen it all...WARNING! WARNING!The following link takes you to a place thatis offensive and decidedly Not Safe For Work.If you are a prude, easily offended, goody two-shoes,highly religous, prissy, puritan oroverly-righteous, do NOT click on the link.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

(A word of caution, this clip contains NUDITY.If you can't handle it, go elsewhere and do NOT press the PLAY button. And obviously it would be considered NOT SAFE FOR WORK...Don't blame me if you get your ass in hot water for watching it...

Link:

I'm not sure what they're selling but I may have to order one, just in case.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

This year was going to be different...More people, better food, more fun, less hair cutting.

The trip originally was planned for 15 people...I had about 17 people tell me they wanted to go, but I knew it would be less than that. We had cancellations and no-shows right up to the day before we departed.

The trip was split into two parts, The early crew (5 of us) would go down and get the site ready on Thursday, and everyone else would come down on Friday morning. We'd all depart on Sunday afternoon.

Things started to get interesting as I watched the weather forecasts and the Pulaski Shoals data buoy readings:Windy and cool... and a cold front was on it's way. It would be hitting the Tortugas on Thursday around noon.

Lovely.

We set out from Jax around 6:30 on Wednesday night, had dinner on the way down and made our way to Key West arriving in plenty of time to load the boat at 6:30.

The Captain tried to scare us off..."It's gonna bad out there. The front is coming and it is going to hit us either before or just as we hit Rebecca Channel. We're talking 8-10 foot seas."None of our group of 5, nor any of the other 20 or so additional visitors bailed...

True to his word, just as we hit the end of the Quicksands beyond the Marquesas, the sky turned black, the rain started and the seas were a mess...The crew passed out seasick bags and quite a few were used for the appropriate purpose.

We weathered the storm and arrived at the Dry Wet Tortugas about 10 minutes behind schedule. Sunny Days didn't make the trip at all.

There was a steady rain falling as we stared of offload our equipment.We delayed putting up our tents until after 1pm when the weather started to break.

Rough waters off the south swim beach

It took us a while, but we finally got camp set up and by the end of the day everything was starting to come together.

It was a cool and windy night, and the next day (Friday) there was a sustained wind from the north-north-west.

Friday morning the other three of our crew arrived on the Yankee Freedom II...We sent all the first-timers off to enjoy the Fort tour and a couple of us took care of stowing new gear and getting things squared away. Things were fixing to get interesting...

Constant Readers have no doubt been following the Out of Context quotes from down at the Park... Lots of one-liners, insults, snaps, and digs at each other...At one point I did dust off a classic old joke...Yours Truly: "Dude, you look awful."Anonymous Participant: "I feel fine, though..."YT: "Hmmm. I better check my MedDiags program on my Crackberry..."(YT digs out his Crackberry and starts Application.)YT: "'Looks Bad - Feels Bad' - That's not it."YT: "'Looks Good - Feels Bad' - That's not it either."Concerned looks from other CampersYT: "Loogs Good - Feels Good... Nope."YT: "Ah! Here it is... Looks Bad - Feels Good.... You're a vagina."

There is a story that needs to be told here that I will let someone else detail:The Tale of the Cooler Nazi...Check back for information on how Yours Truly was thwarted in every way possible in my efforts to keep drinks and ice available for the duration of the trip...

A few pictures are in order...

Friday the 12 was a full moon...Full moon over the Harbor.

And of course, the full moon brings out some odd behavior in people...Amanda and Glyn, thankfully oblivious to the Just-say-no-to-Crack Zack-style Full Moon. Ewwww.

Sunrise over the ShrimpboatsThe Shrimpers were lined up down the eastern edge of the Park border, taking advantage of the lee created by the Park's shallow waters.

The sun did come out for a bit, and the swim beach was sheltered from the wind...Erich, Jeff, Zack, Glyn and Frau...

And no trip report from DRTO is complete without the obligatory Sunset Photo...

Watching the sunset...Note Frau's use of the sleeping bag to ward off frostbite.

One last one...

Glyn's run-in with the Physalia physalia...

He got the black eye the the previous evening... I'll let someone closer to the incident tell that story...

There was lots of drinking, lots of good food...

Clothes. Stayed. On... Thankfully- for several reasons...The wind chill had the temps down in the low 60's, maybe even the upper 50's.We had a steady 30kt wind through the night on Friday and Saturday...No one really wanted to risk frostbite in order to re-enact the 2007 Naked Moat Marathon. Besides, with Jeremy and Kim gone, any streaker would be in greater danger... Ranger Sarah is a "shoot-first-ask-questions-later" kinda girl.And no one wants to get their genitalia Tazed...

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Just getting ready to cook dinner for the crew.Last night: Rib Eye steaks with ginger/soy marinade, potatoes, ceviche and a lagniappe of shrimp flame-sauteed with 100-proof Capt. Morgan Rum and a splash of Grand Mariner.

(During dinner, no less...)Jeff: Innocuous comment regarding Zack playing a skin-flute.Amanda: (Sarcastically) "What's a skin flute?"Glyn: "Do you want me to show you or just tell you?"(Long incredulous pause...)Amanda: "Wow. *You* are a charmer..."

First: Blagojevich said he knew Obama wanted Senate Candidate 1 for the open seat but "they’re not willing to give me anything except appreciation. (Expletive) them."

Then David Axelrod says:"I know he's [Urkel] talked to the governor and there are a whole range of names, many of which have surfaced, and I think he has a fondness for a lot of them," said in a Nov. 23 interview.

Then His Urkelness (indulging in some Clintonesque parsing) says:"I had no contact with the governor or his office and so we were not, I was not aware of what was happening."(Note his 'Non-Teleprompter gaffe" where he starts to say something- then has to backtrack to hide the truth.)

Which, if you read between the lines, could possibly be translated as "Someone else was working out all the details for me, but I was keeping my hands from getting dirty." or "I'm getting ready to throw someone under... Uh I mean, Someone is getting ready to throw themselves under the bus to keep me from being sullied by this Chicago-politics-as-usual occurrence."...

So, here come the bus... and..."I was mistaken when I told an interviewer last month that the President-elect has spoken directly to Governor Blagojevich about the Senate vacancy. They did not then or at any time discuss the subject." - Axelrod, 12/9/08

But the Media still believe His Oneness every time he says he's not aware things going on right in front of him. Here are a few examples:

On Rev. Wright: “I wasn’t aware of the AIDS conspiracy statement, which I think is completely out of line and off the wall,” And the ever-popular: “I wasn’t aware of his statements, 'God damn America'. Those statements were not ones that I knew about until the story broke a week and a half ago.”

On Rezko: “I was aware of what was in the newspapers, but I certainly was not aware of the serious charges that have subsequently been brought.”

So now Hussein Urkel will have us believe that you can say anything you like during a campaign and 1) not be held responsible for the veracity of the comment 2) he has no regard for the intelligence (or lack thereof) of the people he is speaking to.

Partial transcript:

"This is fun for the press to try to stir up whatever quotes were generated during the course of the campaign, and you’re having fun. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m not faulting it. But, look, I think if you look at the statements that Hillary Clinton and I have made outside of the heat of a campaign, we share a view that America has to be safe and secure, and in order to do that we have to combine military power with strengthened diplomacy."

No, Dumbass-Elect,They are YOUR words. You should be held responsible for the things you say and the aspersions you cast on others.No, it is NOT a case of "All's fair in love and politics." You can't have it both ways...

If you say her foreign experience is just tea parties with the HoiPolloi and she's not fit to play in the Big Show, then her tea party experience is not qualification to be Secretary of State.And, by the way, Mr. Professor of Constitutional Law, There is no "Office of the President-Elect".And second, you AREN'T the President-Elect until after the Electoral College convenes and votes on the matter.

And one last note (for the moment anyway)...For all Hussein's Barry's suggestion the McCain would be "Bush Part II", it sure as hell looks like Jan 20 will be the beginning of "Clinton Part II".Hope you enjoy the CHANGE...(I would have preferred to have 10s, 20s, 50s and 100s instead of a pocket full of change.)

Monday, December 01, 2008

I don't carry a gun to kill people. I carry a gun to keep from being killed.

I don’t carry a gun to scare people. I carry a gun because sometimes this world can be a scary place.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m paranoid. I carry a gun because there are real threats in the world.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m evil. I carry a gun because I have lived long enough to see the evil in the world.

I don’t carry a gun because I hate the government. I carry a gun because I understand the limitations of government.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m angry. I carry a gun so that I don’t have to spend the rest of my life hating myself for failing to be prepared.

I don’t carry a gun because my sex organs are too small. I carry a gun because I want to continue to use those sex organs for the purpose for which they were intended for a good long time to come.

I don’t carry a gun because I want to shoot someone. I carry a gun because I want to die at a ripe old age in my bed, and not on a sidewalk somewhere tomorrow afternoon.

I don’t carry a gun to make me feel like a man. I carry a gun because men know how to take care of themselves and the ones they love.

I don’t carry a gun because I feel inadequate. I carry a gun because unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate.

I don’t carry a gun because I love it. I carry a gun because I love life and the people who make it meaningful to me.

Additions:

I don’t carry a gun to do a cop’s job. I carry a gun because a cop may not be available when I need him to save my life.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m looking for trouble. I carry a gun to defend my life from the trouble that may find me.

I carry a gun because my I was reared by people who taught me that to be free meant making the price of taking my freedom too high for anyone to pay.

I don’t carry a gun because I hate the world but, because I love my peaceful community and feel a responsibility to keep it that way.

I don’t carry a gun to scare my law-abiding neighbors, but to impress any criminal who comes among us of the necessity for him to actively seek another trade.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m looking for a gunfight, just like I don’t own a fire extinguisher because I’m looking to fight fires. Having a gun readily available evens the odds in a gunfight, just like having a fire extinguisher readily available evens the odds of surviving a fire.

I don't carry a gun to pass judgment on someone. I carry a gun so in case of an unpleasant situation, I can be judged by 12, rather than carried by 6.

I don't carry a gun in order to send someone to the county Coroner. I carry a gun so my wife and/or daughter can hire an attorney to defend me, rather than come to the Coroner's office to identify my body.

Exercise Your 2nd Amendment Rights

Do you have a firearm that you have purchased for home protection, but are not comfortable with your ability to safely maintain, load and fire it?
Uncle Jay would be glad to help.
If you've never shot a firearm or would like an introduction into shooting sports, just let me know.
I can arrange range time and can give you practical assistance in learning about guns, or help you with your personal protection firearm.

Always remember the 5 rules:

1. Always treat a firearms as if it is loaded.
2. Never point a firearm at anyone or anything that you do not intend to kill or destroy.
3. Keep your finger off the trigger until you are ready to shoot.
4. Know your target and what is beyond the target.
5. Don't be a dick.

You can violate one of the rules and you might survive; If you break two of the rules, someone could be hurt or killed.
Violate the 5th rule and the person hurt or killed will probably be you.
Always remember: You are personally responsible for anything that happens while a gun is in your hands.

Ex Libiris

People who should have better judgement than to be following a subversive bastard like Yours Truly