The random passing thoughts and weird ideas of Jesse Shearer. Content will range from essays to observations to art, and just about anything one can think of to put in a blog.

Monday, October 14, 2013

That Same Old Feeling Once Again

Shouldn't I be doing something right
now?

No, seriously, I have that same old
feeling I get again where I think I should be doing something
productive, but I don't know what that something might be or where it
is. It's a sense that says there's one specific thing I should be
doing at a particular moment and at a specific place if I don't want
something bad to happen, but won't let me figure out anything else
about it.

For a little more than a year, a while
back, I thought I had it figured out, and that doing just about
anything, so long as it was something, was enough to keep it at bay.
But over the course of the last six months or so, something happened,
something changed, and I've lost my handle on that. I don't know how
or why, exactly, but it really seems to have happened.

If I were to guess when the turning
point was, I'd have to say that it was about the time of the big ice
storm we had this spring. Granted, not the worst weather event I've
ever been through. That falls to the winter of 1996-1997. I might
wind up telling the whole story on that later on, but the short
version is that it started out with a nasty ice storm, right about
this time of year, actually, instead of in the spring, so the ice
stayed around all winter. On top of that, we wound up with a good
six or eight feet of snow on top of that.

Now, the good news is that we've not
had anything quite like that this fall. The bad news, however, is
that we've had quite a lot of snow in the western part of the state
this last week or so, and just as much rain where I live. The
potential is there for a repeat of what happened back in 1996. I
know I can get through it if I have to, because I've been through it
before, but then again, I'm made nervous by the thought of having to
do it again precisely because I have been before.

Anyway, I'm hoping that doing this will
make me feel better about the situation, if nothing else. Maybe the
coming winter won't be so bad after all, either.