The torch is coming!

You don’t get many chances to lead with a 3-foot statue doing rhythmic gymnastics in downtown Yangzhou.

I’ll be doing quite a bit of writing over the next few years, but I’m willing to bet this is the only time I’ll get to mention a rhythmic gymnastics-themed statue blowing kisses to a crowd of Chinese camera-phones in the middle of a crowded business district.

The reason the traffic on Wenchang Road was forced to dodge dozens of small children posing for their parents’ camera-phones is the arrival of the Olympic Torch in Yangzhou. The torch will be carried through the city tomorrow, including what should be a pretty dramatic stop at the traffic circle in the center of the downtown shopping district.

To prepare for the torch’s arrival there, the city has outfitted the traffic circle with statues of the Beijing ’08 mascots competing in their favorite Olympic events. The more obvious events are strangely missing, in favor of some of the less celebrated contests. The non-revenue events, if you will.

You won’t find swimming or basketball at the head of Wenchang Road, but pole vault, shooting, and weightlifting are all represented, along with ping-pong, karate, and, of course, rhythmic gymnastics.

There are five mascots for the Beijing Olympics, one for each of the Olympic rings. Their names, Beibei, Jingjing, Huanhuan, Yingying, and Nini, combine to form the phrase “Bei Jing Huan Ying Ni,” which means “Welcome to Beijing.”

Jinjing the Panda represents the harmonious bond between man and nature, which makes it a bit strange to see him holding a handgun.

Proving once again that he is by far the manliest of the mascots, Jingjing drew shooting and weightlifting. We’re still waiting for the results of his drug test.

That’s me with Yingying the Tibetan Antelope, who is representing the host’s national sport. I’d speculate that they chose Yingying for the ping-pong statue as a subtle olive branch to the troublesome Autonomous Region, but I think that’s reading a bit too much into it. That’s a real ping-pong paddle, though. Got to love the authenticity there.

Don’t mess with Huanhuan, the Olympic Torch. He knows karate.

Here’s Yingying the Tibetan Antelope on the pole vault. (That’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.)

According to the official bios, Yingying is strong in the track and field events.

This badminton player is Nini the Swallow. Her bio says she’s strong in gymnastics, so she’s stretching a bit here.

And finally, we come to Beibei the Fish. Not surprisingly, she’s strong in the water sports, but she somehow beat out Nini in the rhythmic gymnastics qualifying.

I’m not ready to call her the George Mason of the Yangzhou Torch Relay, but maybe she’s a Davidson.