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Edinburgh Fringe top 10 jokes 2011

Since its inception in 1947, as an alternative (on the fringe of) to the Edinburgh International Festival, the Fringe has grown to such gargantuan proportions that it is reportedly the largest arts festival in the world.

No longer attracting just the alternative arts performers and the up and coming British comedic talent, the Fringe now attracts the cream of the worlds stand-up talent. Each year the top 10 jokes and gags are published and, rather than just give you the list, we’ve also given linked to the websites for each of the performers so you can check out the ones you like the most.

Sit back and enjoy these quality gags from the world’s finest comedians and comedy writers.

1. Nick Helm- “I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.”

2.Tim Vine – “Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.”

3. Hannibal Buress – “People say ‘I’m taking it one day at a time.’ You know what? So is everybody. That’s how time works.”

4. Tim Key – “Drive Thru McDonalds was more expensive than I thought … once you’ve hired the car …”

5. Matt Kirshen – “I was playing chess with my friend and he said, ‘Let’s make this interesting’. So we stopped playing chess.”

6. Sarah Millican – “My mother told me, you don’t have to put anything in your mouth you don’t want to. Then she made me eat broccoli, which felt like double standards.”

7. Alan Sharp – “I was in a band which we called The Prevention, because we hoped people would say we were better than The Cure.”

8. Mark Watson – “Someone asked me recently – what would I rather give up, food or sex. Neither! I’m not falling for that one again, wife.”

9. Andrew Lawrence – “I admire these phone hackers. I think they have a lot of patience. I can’t even be bothered to check my OWN voicemails.”