The Road to Equality

Normally, I am not a sexist person. I believe in equality for both genders. I think you would agree with that. After all, I think you do a great job cutting the grass and raking leaves. I know you enjoy those tasks, so I always encourage it.

We have had many discussions about who should drive to Greensboro or to the beach. I always say that, as equals, we should share the experience. Sometimes you drive and sometimes I drive. We have agreed on that most of the time.

Last month you told your sister that since I was recuperating from surgery you would be driving to Greensboro to meet them for dinner. At that time we had nine inches of snow on the ground with about two inches of that being ice. Even though I know you are a good driver, we do have a new car. Neither of us want to wreck the car or get injured. My thought was that we either cancel the plans or I somehow have to get up to speed health-wise in order to drive the car in snow and ice.

I lived in New York, Iowa, and Indianapolis. Fifteen inches of snow was a great beginning of a snow storm, but school wasn’t cancelled and people still went to work. I learned to drive in those conditions. I’m not being mean, but I really don’t think you are qualified to drive in those road
conditions. I am.

Please understand that I’m not being sexist, just practical. Any harsh road conditions, I drive. Any baking cookies, fixing meals, keeping the fire going by hauling wood, while it snows, you handle. I hope you don’t take that the wrong way. I just want to protect us and keep our car in one piece.

She Said

First of all, reread your second sentence and define equality. Never mind….I’ll save you the chore of actually getting up to look for the dictionary. Webster defines equality as “in an identical manner.” That means I cut the grass one week and you do it the next. I rake one round of leaves and you rake the next. I prepare dinner one night and you do it the next.

Do you get my drift?

We both work full-time, although I usually work more hours than you do. I know what you’re going to say…I have all of these board meetings to go to so it evens out. I’ll give you that one. About driving…when we go to Greensboro every Saturday, I drive one way and you drive the other. If I understand you correctly, you want us to participate equally in everything we do. So how about this…we’ll put all of our tasks in a jar with points assigned to each job. As we perform each one of them, we put those points in another jar. Then when it comes time to cash in our points (example…I may not want to drive to the beach, but just ride along and relax) we can subtract points from those accumulated. I kind of like this new plan!

By the way, in February, with all of the snow and your surgery (rendering you disabled), I have a boatload of points already. So let me think, I’ll have tea and cookies on the front porch while you get the yard ready for spring…. following my directions of course

About The Author

Larry Oldham is the most honest and talented salesperson on the planet, as well as the most humble. The Virginia Press Association bought in and awarded him the 2010 Outstanding Sales Professional of the Year. He and his wife Dena are known to debate the finer things in life with a little needling here and there whenever possible.