Beautification effort circles F.C. drains

Over the past few years, utility boxes and electrical transformers around Fort Collins have been gradually painted over by community artists in an effort to spruce up the eyesores and curb graffiti.

Fort Collins also is home to some of the sexiest cobblestone alleyways you ever saw. So inviting are they that it’s just a matter of time before they start stealing away biped-traffic from the bland sidewalks lined with all those storefronts.

Well, Fort Collins has set its sights on its next pretty project: sewer drains and manhole covers.

Fort Collins Utilities and Art in Public Places are holding a design contest for some 3,000 storm drain markers and 75 manhole covers. Request for proposals are available at www.fcgov.com/purchasing. Submissions are due by Jan. 3.

The 2011 contest theme focus is on aquatic insects in the watershed, but The Eye would formally like to submit its own likeness for the drain markers.

Not only would the markers look handsome, but they would serve as a watchful eye over potential polluters considering pouring their motor oil, plutonium or fracking solutions down the drain.

Wait. On second thought, placing The Eye on manhole covers could be a bad idea, perhaps proving somewhat disconcerting for anyone wearing a kilt. No mind in the gutter here.