Ghost Haunting Frat House Files Sex Abuse Charges

The Delta Chi house has long been swirled in controversy. For years there has been a rumor that the house is haunted by the ghost of a 24 year old female that hung herself in the 1800's. The frat house has been there for forty years and is known to be the notorious 'party fraternity' of the entire campus. The Delta Chi house is now in hot water after an incident that took place last week. Apparently after a long weekend of hard drinking was winding down, four Delta Chi brothers decided to summon the ghost of Anjelica Delica in the hopes of sleeping with her. They thought it might be hot to "bang a ghost" after they watched a porn called 'Ghost Whores 7'. Legend has it that if you say Anjelica's name three times in the mirror in pitch black dark, her image will appear. The boys did this and when she appeared they allegedly began to behave very inappropriately towards the ghost, calling it degrading names and being very aggressive, trying to pour alcohol down its throat.

The next day the ghost reported this incident to the police via a ghost medium. A sheriff had this to say; "She was very upset. She feels violated and didn't even know that that was even possible to do to a ghost." The defense lawyers for the frat boys had this to say; "This apparition has a vast checkered sexual history. She has slept with Moses, Caligula and most recently Colin Farrell." A frat brother had this to say, "I saw what happened and the ghost was totally leading them on. I mean when you hover above a 21 year old guy's bed at 3 am wearing only a thin sheet you have to expect something is going to happen right?" We tried to talk to the ghost but apparently it has gone into hiding and is living in the cellar of an abandoned warehouse. The ghost medium told us; "This whole thing has been very hard for her. The only reason she hasn't killed herself is because she's a ghost and she can't. So she literally has no escape. It's partly the porn industry's responsibility. They are presenting a very poor image of female ghosts. Not all female ghosts are sluts."

Unfortunately this disturbing trend seems to be spreading. Just two days ago another group of fraternity members in California tried to get in on the whole 'ghost sex' thing when they tried to have sex with actor Patrick Swayze. Swayze was very confused and had this to say; "These guys just attacked me out of nowhere and for some reason thought I was a ghost. I kept telling them that I had only played a ghost in the movie 'Ghost'. They were very inappropriate."