February 13, 2018

Iran's Latest: The West Uses Lizards To Spy

The former chief-of-staff of Iran's armed forces said Tuesday that Western spies had used lizards which could "attract atomic waves" to spy on the country's nuclear programme.

"Several years ago, some individuals came to Iran to collect aid for Palestine... We were suspicious of the route they chose," he told the reformist ILNA news agency.

"In their possessions were a variety of reptile desert species like lizards, chameleons... We found out that their skin attracts atomic waves and that they were nuclear spies who wanted to find out where inside the Islamic republic of Iran we have uranium mines and where we are engaged in atomic activities," he said.

Those must be some really killer waves - do they have championship surfing venues over in the land of the Mullahs? And the lizards have skins that "attract atomic waves"? Do tell! The wonder of Nature and the nefariousness of Western Spies never cease to amaze. I reckon that when OBlamer was bowing to them, a few lizards must have slipped out of his pockets.