Tag: knockout

Most evidence seems to suggest that Brazilian dance-fighting isn’t very effective in an actual MMA match. But the doubters were proved wrong on Saturday night, as a Capoeira practitioner named Marcus "Lelo" Aurelio (not to be confused with Maximus) scored one of the most epic knockout-kicks in history at a North American Challenge event in North Vancouver. Aurelio’s opponent Keegan Marshall was clearly unprepared for the whirling-dervish routine, and let his hands drop at juuuuuust the wrong moment; the devastation comes at the vid’s 0:31 mark. After checking to see if Marshall is still alive (he was), Aurelio commemorates the moment with a victory dance that lasts about as long as the fight itself. Enjoy it, buddy — these kinds of things don’t happen very often.

Who the hell knows what Yoshihiro Nakao was thinking when he planted a surprise smooch on Heath Herring before their fight at K-1’s 2005 New Year’s Eve show. (Maybe that the Texas Crazy Horse would become blinded by lust, leaving him unable to intelligently defend himself?) Unfortunately, not only is Herring “not gay,” but he resents the implication, and responds by punching Nakao right across his sweet, pillowy lips. Even if the match was ruled a no-contest, it’s still a KO at the 0:00 mark of round 1, earning it an honorary spot on our list of Fast & Furious knockouts. Not since the epic Gracie vs. Howard battle at UFC 3 had there been such a dramatic finish to a fight before it had even technically started. And the nickname “Kiss” still haunts Nakao to this day…

Just two days after Norifumi Yamamoto thrilled a Tokyo crowd with his four-second flying-knee KO against Kazuyuki Miyata, an eerily similar knockout took place in Montreal. Except this time, it was the dude sprinting across the ring who got himself KTFO — and in only three seconds, making this the fastest MMA knockout ever. We can only assume that Lautaro Tucas watched the Yamamoto/Miyata fight and thought, “Hey, I bet I could do that too.” But Chris Clements saw it coming, and stepped in with a sledgehammer right hook just as Tucas was leaving the ground. Tucas’s lifeless body flopped into the ropes, upon which Clements slugged him in the head three times. Awesome. Fun fact: Tucas never fought again after that night. We’re not sure if that’s because he switched to a less painful profession, or because he committed seppuku to make up for the shame he caused his family, but either way, it had to be done.

Though the official time of the stoppage was 0:04 into round 1, that seems more like a generous estimate than an exact measurement. Kid Yamamoto takes a Rickey Henderson-style leadoff before the fight even starts, and dives knee-first into the hapless Kazuyuki Miyata’s face. Miyata clearly hadn’t trained for this scenario, but as he’d find out, ducking into the blow is not the most effective defense. The stunning flying-knee KO was Yamamoto’s 11th-straight win, his ninth-straight win by stoppage, and the fastest knockout in MMA history to that point. Unfortunately, his record wouldn’t last long…

Give the UFC credit, they can spot a nascent, kind-of-but-not-really grudge match in the making a mile away. MMA Madness reports that Matt Hamill will meet Brandon Vera at UFC 101 in Philadelphia to see who has the chops to make it in the light heavyweight division and who will end up on the receiving end of an assholish celebration.

As you probably recall, Hamill head-kicked Vera’s friend and training partner, Mark Munoz, into a briefly frightening unconscious state, then paraded around the Octagon like he’d just hit a walk-off homerun in the last World Series game ever. Hamill would later explain the celebration by pointing out that a) he’s deaf, so vibrations from an excited crowd get him really pumped, and b) he doesn’t head kick that many people, and this one was pretty sweet.

Known for his very un-Gracie-like hard-charging style, Ralph Gracie racked up five-straight first-round stoppages in vale tudo matches during the ‘90s before re-entering competition in 2003 to test himself against modern mixed martial artists. But his PRIDE debut against Dokonjonosuke Mishima at Bushido 1 didn’t go so well — he only won by decision — and he returned to the ring seven months later ready to murder somebody. And that babyfaced little Japanese dude in the red corner, who Ralph’s student BJ Penn had choked out the year before? Yeah, he’d do. But Gracie was a little too anxious to get out there and kick ass (as evidenced by his refusal to touch gloves), and when he shot in right after the bell, his jaw ricocheted off Gomi’s knee; the Fireball Kid took over from there. This was the fight that officially put Gomi on the map — and served as the final six seconds in Ralph Gracie’s MMA career.

#5: Jonathan Goulet vs Joey Brown @ TKO 17 (9/25/04), 7 seconds He calls himself the Road Warrior, but Jonathan Goulet may as well be nicknamed “The Flash.” Twenty-five of the UFC/TKO veteran’s 32 pro fights have ended in the first round, and six have ended within the first 30 seconds. (Luckily, he’s won most of them.) Goulet’s all-time fastest victory was this seven-second KO against Joey “Knockdown” Brown. All it took was a head kick, a quick Thai clinch, and a knee fired right up the middle, and Brown was in dreamland. The win was Goulet’s fifth in what became a ten-fight win streak, which culminated in him scoring a contract with the UFC, shooting down Jay Hieron in his notoriously bloody Octagon debut, and choking out Shonie Carter back in Canada. As for Brown, he still seemed to be dizzy from Goulet’s knee during his next four fights, losing all of them.

Many of you disagreed with our description of yesterday’s cartwheel kick knockout as “the greatest KO ever.” Yeah, we weren’t totally serious about that (ever heard of hyberbole?), but our good friend Matt Brown, editor of Fight! Magazine, took issue with it and sent us the above video to demonstrate what a truly amazing knockout looks like.

These two midgets pull out all the stops in this kickboxing bout, and as you can tell the announcer (is that you, Frank Trigg?) is loving it. So is this yet another sign of the impending apocalypse? Maybe. But we prefer to think of it as a sign that Matt Brown is a weirdo. Don’t worry though, he insists that he only stumbled across the video by accident while searching for midget porn.

After the jump, Kimo Leopoldo is out of jail and breaking bricks with his head. Is that more or less bizarre than the midgets? You decide.

What you’re about to witness is the MMA equivalent of a walk-off home run. Chris “Red Bull” Willems gets a leg-kick checked at the start of this fight, but then reloads and goes upstairs — hard. The sound of foot impacting with face can be heard all the way in the cheap seats, and Akoni Nakila is comatose before he even hits the canvas. We’ve seen some gnarly head-kick KOs in our time, but this one is a freakin’ masterpiece; Cro Cop himself couldn’t have painted it better.