Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Mmmhmmm, he’s leaving the Republican Party and joining the Dems (gasp) because what’s left of the GOP in Pennsylvania is planning to get their purge on through the primary and remove the moderate Specter.

Oh my, now that’s gotta sting.

‘Tis hard to get a handle on where the schadenfreude is coming from…the GOP’s inability to come up with decent snark-based spin statement about this divorce (come on now y'all, give your faithful something tweet worthy!)...the GOP’s willingness to let the party indulge in a quest for far right party purity (political consequences be damned)...or witnessing them turn on each other and rend flesh from bone in a frenzy that would shock a shark.

A bitch spent yesterday in Jefferson City getting my Lobby Day on! Congrats to the coalition of pro-choice organizations that gathered to lobby Missouri legislators to support prevention legislation. This bitch was impressed by the many first-timers who approached the day with passion and energy!

Fantabulous.

As I was riding the bus back home I monitored the PPMissouri twitter site and noted that a certain Rep. Cynthia Davis chose the day to add a pharmacy denial amendment to a piece of legislation. Rep. Davis, well know to Missourians for her illogical logic and public displays of legislative confusion, offered up the following declaration in support of her amendment to protect pharmacies from having to…umm, well dispense emergency contraception that they find morally objectionable…

"I have trouble understanding why anybody who is an American, who is not in favor of Communism, would want us to dictate what we're going to say people can and cannot stock.”

Yeah, she really took it there...and, since the amendment passed, that shit actually worked.

Which led this bitch to ponder how many locally owned Missouri pharmacies and businesses are struggling to keep their heads above water due to our state’s fubar economic situation while the Republican majority let Rep. Davis indulge in yet another public display of ignorance…this one being the protection of businesses over the rights of individuals all wrapped up in her latest attempt to resurrect the Red Scare.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Pause…think of Wilbur telling Charlotte to go fuck herself and releasing a plague upon the masses…continue.

Who knew?

Despite my initial concern, people do not catch swine flu from consuming bacon.

Whew!

Swine flu is…well, a strain of influenza that used to be a pig problem and is now a people problem. The regular flu kills people every year and this version has been deadly in Mexico, so officials are proactively alerting the public in hopes that folks will take their illish Swine Plague symptoms seriously.

As reported on CNN.com, White House spokesman Robert Gibbs said the outbreak "is of great concern to the White House."

"I would tell people it's certainly not a time to panic."

Word of advice, B-Gibbs - when you tell the masses not to panic we panic. And if people weren’t planning to get their panic on, morning television’s Swine Flu frenzification will take care of that shit if they have to break out the computer generated path-o-plague map of the world to do it!

Sigh.

Anyhoo, B-Gibbs went on to say...”If you're sick, stay home, get treatment, go see a doctor."

Oh, now that’s precious.

A bitch instantly had a vision of B-Gibbs skipping rocks on a pond!

Shit.

Of course people should stay home when they are sick…but most people do not for fear of looking undedicated or lost wages. A pattern of illness denial that has only intensified with our current state of fubar economics.

Of course people should seek treatment for illnesses…but doctors and medicine cost money and lots of folks don’t have coverage or extra money.

In Mexico, many of those who have lost their lives to Swine Flu waited until they were very ill to seek medical treatment...and if anyone thinks that couldn't happen here in America is kidding themselves BIG TIME.

Nothing highlights the public health threat to national security that is our lack of a functioning healthcare system like an outbreak of some serious and easily spread shit.

The advice…to wash your hands, cover your mouth when you cough, stay home if ill and be safe rather than sorry by seeing a doctor early.

The reality...people may or may not wash their hands (nasty motherfuckers!), don't cover their mouth when they cough (ugh...NASTY!) and tend to avoid or can not afford safer rather than sorry medical care.

Friday, April 24, 2009

The first thought that jumped up into Shark-Fu’s afro…If I have to hear that song one more time a bitch is going to dream the dream of getting some merciless correction on with the mainstream press!

The next thought that replaced that thought up in Shark-Fu’s afro…Ain’t it a damn shame that people are so conditioned to think traditional definitions of beauty go hand-in-hand with talent that they are actually fucking disturbed by a person who proves that narrow minded shit wrong.

Pause…consider…continue.

Which doesn’t make any fucking sense, does it? No amount of hair color or lip-gloss can hide a lack of talent. Haven’t we learned anything from our extended exposure to Ann Coulter?

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Longtime readers know that this bitch is a mentor. My sister C-Money is also a mentor and her mentee is my mentee’s older sister.

I have shared a lot of our mentoring experiences…the good, the bad and Lawd have mercys…and I want to thank folks again for offering advice and encouragement through the years.

C-Money’s mentee has struggled with a lot of shit. She is a mother…a sister…a daughter…and she takes all of that seriously. She is also a student and has demonstrated amazing strength as she juggles poverty, parenting, school and work with little assistance from the system and a lot of drama from multiple sources.

Well, y’all…this May Ms. C-Money’s Mentee will be a high school graduate!

Oh shit, there goes the mascara.

Pause…sniffle…continue.

I am so very proud of her!

And I am beyond proud of C-Money for mentoring without the guarantee of academic success or some 'big moment' huge accomplishment. She’s a great big sister and put those skills to work…big time!

As an activist who works with teen mothers and young women who live in poverty and with want, there aren’t a lot of traditional celebratory moments. I have learned to celebrate other things…a month of perfect attendance at school, getting and keeping a job, completing parenting classes or just making it through a difficult day. Those celebrations are precious in a way I would have never imagined they would be.

This rather traditional high school graduation celebration will be precious too.

It’s been a challenging week for my family of friends for reasons I won't get into.

But there is hope that things do get better...that our support and love of each other will get us through tough times...and that we will celebrate making it through the difficult days together.

C-Money’s mentee will have new decisions and choices to make post-graduation...and she will continue to have our support and advice.

For now, she’s gotta get ready to walk up and accept the diploma she sure as shit earned.

A bitch looked at the tape whilst drinking my morning coffee and…well, I think she may be right.

Catch the knee before you put someone’s eye out!

Shit.

I hope Miss California is right because this bitch thinks her answer was unattractive as a motherfucker, un-American and worthy of costing a contestant a crown.

Oh no, she didn't?!?

Oh yes, I did!

I’m not saying that people don’t have the right to be wrong…to express their wrong as hell fucked up from the floor up values…and even share their opinion that their beliefs should be the law of the land even though the law of the land was intended to protect the minority group from the whims of the majority.

A bitch is a proud ACLU supporter and I’ll fight like hell to protect the right of the citizen to have public displays of ig’nance…mostly because that shit protects this bitch’s ability to indulge in public displays of bitchitude-based brilliance (wink).

But what Miss California doesn’t get and probably won’t ever get is that no amount of MAC eye shadow or lip gloss or ‘no disrespect intended, for sure…I just think y’all aren’t worthy of the thousands of rights associated with legal marriage anymore than I think brunettes should win this title!’ can make her opinion of marriage being an exclusive man-on-woman right attractive.

And, since pageants are subjective as a motherfucker…just look at who made the final cut, for the love of all that’s the return of the 1980’s Seventeen magazine cover model…the judges were in the right to judge that answer to be unpretty.

Monday, April 20, 2009

A bitch adores hockey…even though it can be a heart breaking, stress inducing, emotional roller coaster from hell.

Gulp.

The Blues are now down 3 games to 0 against those Canucks from Vancouver. It would be easier to take if they’d had their asses handed to them…but this series has been more about missed opportunities on our side than the absolute ass-whooping it looks like on paper.

Ugh!

Anyhoo, C- Money and this bitch will be at the game Tuesday to cheer on our beloved Blues.

A bitch’s first thought…Damn it to hell and back again if Governor Palin didn’t sum up the brand identity problem of the GOP with one speech. The marriage of traditional Republican values (small government and low taxes) with the modern social conservative bent (anti-choice, anti-separation of church and state, anti-equality and anti-intellectual) is the reason most regular folks can’t get down with that elephant. Most people are turned off by one or the other…and since all the multiple personalities trapped within the ravaged carcass of the GOP are vocal as a motherfucker, people don’t have a chance to fall in love with one for dislike of the other.

If a voter likes the fiscal responsibility angle…and can overlook the evidence of party bullshit that is the last eight years of The Great Republican Pork Festival…then they still run straight into a social agenda that hermit monks find oppressive.

If a voter adores the social agenda angle…and can get past the evidence of individual bullshit that is the last eight years of The Great Republican Failure to Walk that Walk that they Talk…then they still run straight into an economic agenda that is at best a well dressed corpse, lacking clarity beyond a series of historically inaccurate tea-based temper tantrums.

Once a bitch got past that fascinating ponderfication…During her speech Governor Palin shared her experience of being unexpectedly pregnant and choosing to continue her pregnancy. She offered that she understands what other women face when confronted with an unplanned pregnancy...and a bitch can’t help but wonder at her lack of inner-work there.

Palin spoke of thinking about her options…pondering the decision and knowing that no one would know her choice…and then choosing to continue her pregnancy to term based on her personal faith. That is the experience her audience would like to deny women…choice. Palin's confidence in her decision is the emotion her audience seeks to destroy…her clarity of purpose is what they would like to dismantle for women.

Yet they applaud Palin’s choice even as they raise money towards the effort of denying other women the ability to make reproductive decisions…oh no....oh shit!

Fuck a duck, now my Afro hurts.

Wince.

In conclusion...Even as I wonder at the current state of Palin and her party I know that one should not sleep on this shit.

Republicans have an amazing ability to find the spin that makes otherwise rational people vote against their best interest and for that well dressed corpse-like split personality having hypocritical as a motherfucker knavish elephant.

It is important to note that the layoffs that make news are also layoffs that force families to make hard financial decisions about healthcare...like “is that a cough or an infection?” or “do we need this prescription or will things clear up on their own?” or “groceries, utilities or Timmy’s asthma treatment?”

One of the elements of the federal stimulus plan that this bitch liked was that it funneled money to states that are sure to have funding gaps so that those states could continue crucial programs that are more needed than ever given the ramifications of fubar economics.

But the majority in control of Missouri’s House and Senate have decided to play politics…to basically guarantee the failure of the stimulus plan by refusing funds, cutting programs and forcing families to shut down instead of move forward.

Expanding S-CHIP would extend healthcare coverage to the children of the newly unemployed.

Expanding S-CHIP would mean that a child with asthma would get proactive treatment instead of an emergency room visit…and save all of us money in the end.

Expanding S-CHIP should have been a no-brainer.

But expanding S-CHIP was just too much like right.

I guess this is one way for legislators to support those traditional values they are always talking about…if by tradition they mean their history of callous disregard and willful neglect.

May decency prevail when this bill is discussed in the House-Senate conference committee…

…because it sure as shit was a no-show when the Senate took this vote.

Although I’m tempted to put StLtoday.com in the fuck it column, I’m going to have one last chew first.

Shall we?

The Post would like us to believe that their comment policy…which is pretty much to leave up anything that doesn’t use profane language (and damn it all if the comments don’t illustrate the flaw of what is considered profane and what isn’t) or threaten someone (a damn it all once again if the comments don’t demonstrate the editor’s confusion over what some of us consider threatening and why)...exists to encourage participation by a variety of opinionated folks rather than a festival of politically correct agreement.

Clearly some of those folks making comments feel very welcome in the land of anything goes…so welcome that one might believe that they have lacked a safe space through which to manifest their bigotry (a bitch will get to that in a minute).

But the anything goes = stimulating conversation position is bullshit. Not only because the quality of anything goes is fucking pathetic but because anything goes pretty much guarantees that only one set of ideas will…um, get going.

See, what the comment policy fails to appreciate is that people of color…and Jews and Muslims…and LGBT people…and all the other “others” who are open targets in the comment section do not need to be reminded that there are rancid bigots full of hate out there.

Trust a bitch…we know!

Contrary to editorial belief, those assholes aren’t starving for opportunities to express their views…that’s the lie that keeps on lying. True, they may not have The Dearborn Independent anymore…but that hasn’t stopped them. Google a racist term and you’ll find plenty of sites where bigots are free to express how hard it is to be a bigot and how they don’t get any respect and how the (insert "other" here) are trying to take over the world.

The voice of the American bigot has a guaranteed presence in the mainstream media, who are forever fearful of being branded liberal thus always willing to allow Ann Coulter or Pat Buchanan or Michael Slavery Was a Good Thing Medved to come on and insult the hell out of some group that is already regularly insulted by the fans of those same assholes at work, at school, while driving, on television, at the movies, while shopping and when reading the motherfucking newspaper.

Cough.

If a bitch gives The Post the benefit of the doubt - the comment policy is an attempt gone wrong to remind that other “other”…those people who talk of a color blind society and a post-racial America…that one election does not social justice make.

If a bitch goes with my gut – the comment policy is an attempt to generate controversy and thus readership as rancid bigots and those who can stomach opposing them engage in arguments.

If a bitch gets my conspiracy theory on – The Post is really trying to make their web site so intolerable that people will pick up the printed paper again in desperation.

Monday, April 13, 2009

A wee bit ago this bitch posted about the launch of the St. Louis Post Dispatch’s newish blog venture, A Conversation About Race. I took a wait and see approach…which is to say that I was waiting to see when that shit would blow the fuck up.

Background – St. Louis is a racially polarized city that carries the Missouri baggage of midwestern segregation barely dismantled and poorly addressed. Catch that knee…the truth is the truth and no one gets anywhere denying the fucking undeniable. We may have come a long way since the murderous race riots of the early 1900’s, but we’ve got a long way to go.

Some more background – a bitch is not a fan of the school of tolerance or the avoidance it teaches. In order to heal we must expose and treat the wound, so I support folks having difficult conversations about race…religion…immigration…the economy…and hockey fan-based adoration (wink). But I’ve learned that those conversations must be carefully monitored lest they be high-jacked by knavish trolls who take them off topic even as their threatening rhetoric discourages others from entering the conversation…which can basically turn a blog post conversation attempt into a Hitler youth rally.

Sadly, that last sentence brings me to the St. Louis Post Dispatch and their Conversation About Race blog.

Cough.

The Post ran a piece in their Go! Magazine about best places to get your kiss on. The cover featured a couple kissing…a local couple kissing…a local inter-racial couple kissing…A BLACK MAN KISSING A WHITE WOMAN!

Gasp.

Oh, the humanity.

Pause…check date to make sure my ass didn’t accidentally wake up in 1962…continue.

Mercy.

Certain readers felt that the picture was staged (it wasn’t – the couple ‘tis indeed a couple) to inflame their sensibilities. They wrote in the express their disgust over that public display of inter-racial affection.

The Conversation About Race blog decided that this dust up deserved some …umm…conversation, so they posted about it. And, keeping with their blog style, opened the comment section up for thoughts and opinions.

Sigh.

Well, I suppose a bitch should be grateful that the editor has deleted the overt violent racists comments…those being a violation of Post policy.

Since they left up the one comparing the kiss to a bloody deer carcass a bitch shudders to think of what the fuck they decided to delete.

Blink.

Lawd, give me strength.

Dear Post posters - If you intend to have a conversation about race then you need to appreciate the history of violence and intimidation that accompanies race in America…and moderate the comments in such a way that folks don’t feel assaulted just reading that shit.

'Tis a difficult task, I know...but one that comes along with having a motherfucking conversation about race!

Otherwise y'all might as well embrace your inner Town Hall and change the name of the blog to The Bigot’s Round Table About Race…

Thursday, April 09, 2009

A bitch is catching up on the latest Somali pirate breaking but sorta-developing so let’s get some awkward as hell interviews with emotional family members to fill time news.

I double-checked with my family’s resident pirate expert, C-Money. She claims that the Somali pirates tried to take the Maersk Alabama, occupied it for a spell, were overthrown by the crew, entered into some sort of negotiation for prisoner exchange but ultimately took the Captain hostage.

I highly recommend The Take, which is about workers in Argentina taking over a factory that was closed down due to fubar economics. I found myself cheering in my couch-based area and fretting over the twists and turns of the worker’s struggle to gain control of the factory.

A bitch gives The Take four out of five fierce Afros.

I can also recommend The Trials of Henry Kissinger. I wasn’t nearly as familiar with Kissinger’s role in certain historical events as I thought I was…and this documentary has inspired this bitch to get my research.

This bitch gives The Trials of Henry Kissinger four out of five Afros.

Warning – The Trials of Henry Kissinger does feature a lot of Chris Hitchens, but he’s the political thinker Hitchens not the women can’t take a joke one.

Oh he’s still Hitchified but not so Hitched that one can’t watch the film for fear of a detour into the birth stories of the ancient gods…or random Kipling quotes.

The loss of La Clinica highlights multiple needs…for quality affordable healthcare, for multi-lingual healthcare options to address racial disparities in care…and for the reform of immigration policy that forces people underground, discourages them from seeking medical care for fear of deportation and puts all of us at risk.

There are several providers serving the uninsured and under-insured in the city. Some have bi-lingual staff…others may or may not ask a patient’s legal status.

But the loss of La Clinica, a trusted provider, demonstrates the far-reaching impact of our economic crisis.

A bitch thinks this was the rocket launch equivalent of clearing one’s throat after having gone unnoticed whilst hovering impatiently on the edge of a conversation…say, a recent world leader kickball tournament that a certain Dear Leader didn’t get invited to.

Now, the sorta-world will gather…issue overly crafted resolutions…and then, hopefully, get about the bitness of trying to figure out what the fuck Kim Jong-il wants.

And then they’ll sorta-give it to him…slowly and with a lot of eye rolling...and heavy sighing and trash talking behind his back.

Sigh.

Such is the way of things with nations that can flex their nuclear capabilities…much like it was back in the day when the class asshole was the only person who remembered to bring a kickable ball.

Friday, April 03, 2009

A bitch has been involved in a piece of legislation here in Missouri that would require insurance companies to cover treatment for autism spectrum disorder. This bill was opposed by insurance companies but a bitch had hope that the power of the autism coalition and the voters it represents would overcome the entrenched power of the insurance lobby.A bitch’s hopes were dashed yesterday…on World Autism Day…when Missouri Republicans in the House Rules Committee refused to send the bill to the floor for debate. The Senate’s bill is also curiously hung up in committee.

On World Autism Day, House Speaker Ron Richard threatened to appoint a special committee to study the issue...which is pretty much a death sentence for this legislation.

So, Missouri Republicans celebrated World Autism Day by pretending to be confused by the fact that 1 out of 150 children have autism spectrum disorder… 1 out of 150 families can legally be denied insurance coverage for proven treatments that radically change people’s lives and futures…1 out of 150 families must now wage a losing war against insurance companies, who take our money and then deny our loved ones coverage.

Just when you think they can’t get any more panderific to special interests, they show you that they’ve just gotten started.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

A bitch’s 38 year old brother is profoundly autistic and aphasic. April may be Autism Awareness Month, but this bitch lives with autism every day of every month of every year. As a result, the realities of having a sibling with autism are my family’s definition of normal. We’re used to the sounds, the behaviors and the never ending battle to protect and defend the services that make my brother’s life possible.

Autism is not a childhood disorder. It is a brain disorder that, despite claims made by some celebrity authors, will continue to be a brain disorder once a person with autism reaches 18 years of age. Since there have been several high profile celebrities who have a loved one with autism…and since we now know that autism spectrum disorder impacts 1 out of 150 children who, Gawd willing, will become adults with autism…many a lawmaker has championed funding for programs that serve autistic children.

And a bitch is not going to bitch about that shit, since we need to fund programs for autistic children that will likely increase the independence and quality of life of those children when they grow up.

Note – that Fuck You is immediate for those of us who have an adult loved one with autism.

Don’t be fooled into giving them a pass on this budget shit just because they are pandering to the voting block that is parents of autistic children.

And do not allow yourself to assume that your child will not need support…will not require a job coach…will be able to live in an apartment downtown, drive a car and so forth and so on.

I hope they will and many adults with autism are living independent lives.

But many are not and many will not - families need to prepare for that shit…need to protect the programs with make the difference between people like my brother living in a glorified institution isolated from the world or living in residential facilities while actively participating in their community.

So, I’ll say it again - when Missouri lawmakers fund legislation for programs for autistic children but hack away at funding for programs that serve adults with autism they are telling parents and their autistic children and the adult their child will become to Fuck Off.

And they are doing it despite the fact that many states received federal funds designed to prevent cuts to programs that serve the most vulnerable residents. That shit isn’t responsible legislation, y'all…it’s a classic pander.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

There’s a lot going on in the world…the Justice Department plans to drop charges against Senator Stevens, the G20 Summit, the protests at the G20 Summit, Conficker confusion and so forth and so on…but a bitch has received several emails requesting my thoughts on the Diddy color struck casting call drama.

Blink.

Alrighty then!

Shall we?

This bitch grew up in a time when lighter skin was considered prettier by magazines and casting agents and even by certain members of my family who were the very definition of color struck. So coming to adore my Hershey brown (dark chocolate in the summer) skin tone took some time…a lot of inner work…and the blessings that come from the dedicated study of bitchitude.

But the recent re-do of the landmark baby doll test tells us that internalized notions of black not being beautiful and darker black skin being even more not beautiful are alive and well. Despite the protests of many, we are not post-racial and the wounds of bigotry are often visible when many a person of color looks in the mirror.

When I ponder the drama over some sort of casting call sent out for a Ciroc vodka commercial (Diddy is a spokesperson…more on that in a minute) in which lighter skinned women of color were specifically requested, I initially felt the sting of a lifetime spent in a community that often frets getting darker in the summer sun the way some white people fret losing their tan over winter.

Whoever sent that shit out should have anticipated some serious drama even though casting calls are the very definition of insulting as hell for one reason or another.

I dislike the poor production quality of the commercials…they come across as if Diddy’s friends decided to film him over a weekend spent indulging in every possible materialistic excess using their fucking cell phones or hand held cameras.

I dislike the definition of luxury sent out by that shit…and trust a bitch, Diddy announced his relationship with Ciroc stating that he was going to take that brand to another level. Well, he sure as shit took it some place, but it twasn't to the land of luxury. Instead, Ciroc vodka commercials look like cheap hastily put together music videos and feature depictions of women of color as objects in a Diddified world where we are necessary decorations for cars, parties and King like happenings.

Before this bitch can even ponder the skin color of the women in the commercials I must get past their hanging all over a perpetually bored looking Diddy, sending him looks of adoration and lust while they all fly across some body of water on a motherfucking speed boat...and then tossing out final looks of complete smug agreement as Diddy declares himself a king.

Pause…sip coffee…continue.

Suffice it to say Ciroc has a lot of explaining to do when it comes to approving Diddy’s brand identity…and the light skin color specificity shit is just the latest.

One of these days this bitch will land an endorsement deal and launch my Absolut Blackness campaign where all will be welcome as long as they aren't trifling.