Thursday Night Football: NY Jets at New England Patriots on NFL Network at 8:25pm ET. If you are a fantasy football player, this is your reminder to check your line up.

Burn Notice on USA at 9:00pm ET. Series finale. WILL MICHAEL WESTON FINALLY LEAVE MIAMI?!? (My knowledge of this show may not be current.) (Also, as someone who has left Miami, I’m not sure why anyone would do that if they had the option and finances to stay. I miss it. Even more so now that fall is happening.)

Wipeout on ABC at 9:00pm ET. Tonight’s theme is “hotties versus nerds” because the producers of these shows haven’t met the Pajibans and still assume that nerds can’t be hotties! Or are deliberately perpetuating the cultural myth that it’s unexpected or unlikely that an individual can be both intelligent and conventionally attractive. Because good hair only grows when it feeds on IQ points, you know.

Owner’s Manual on AMC at 10:30pm ET.

Children’s Hospital on Adult Swim at 12:00am

Genevieve Burgess may have written this after going out with friends to celebrate something so it is possible she wrote this in a semi-altered state of mind.