Oxford Dictionary Reaffirms Definitions of ‘Stable’ and ‘Genius’

The Oxford University Press released an official statement today to reaffirm the definitions of the words “stable” and “genius.” This reaffirmation, as it was explained by Oxford, had become increasingly necessary due to confusion created by the statements and actions of United States President Donald Trump.

The Oxford English Dictionary has been regarded as the authority for official definitions of English words since 1857. This organization, as the arbiter of lexicon, has a duty and responsibility to ensure that words have absolute definitions. While misuse of vocabulary is common in society, we must stop short of allowing the unnecessary redefinition of common words.

It is a fact that the President of the United States, regardless of his lack of amicability, has a great degree of power and influence worldwide when he speaks. Several months ago, U.S. President Donald Trump announced that he is a ‘stable genius.’ However, given the fact that Trump has never demonstrated any meaningful degree of ‘stability’ nor ‘genius,’ we believe that he made this statement either out of ignorance or malicious intent to redefine English words.

These are the official definitions of the aforementioned words, as they have always been and continue to remain:

Stable – Adjective1. (of an object or structure) not likely to give way or overturn; firmly fixed.
2. (of a person) Sane and sensible; not easily upset or disturbed.

Genius – Noun1. (in general) Exceptional intellectual or creative power or other natural ability.
2. An exceptionally intelligent person or one with exceptional skill in a particular area of activity.

In reference to the word ‘stable,’ President Trump has never demonstrated any degree of stability beyond that of his ability to stand upright without falling. This is demonstrated by his behavior at NATO, his capitalized Tweet to the president of Iran, and his ongoing inflammatory rhetoric toward his country’s media.

In reference to the word ‘genius,’ President Trump has disqualified himself from that designation on several occasions, such as when he dramatically miscalculated the amount of people who attended his inauguration, and his staunch disagreement that the Earth’s climate — within which he is a resident — is warming.

As the arbiter of English definitions, we also feel we have an obligation to suggest alternate phrases that more accurately describe President Trump, while also doing justice to the integrity of the English language.

May we suggest any or all of the following replacement phrases:

Unstable Idiot

Insufferable Buffoon

Egocentric Lunatic

Arrogant Reprobate

Blithering Imbecile

In closing, we want to make clear that all people are free to use (and misuse) words in whichever way they deem necessary to express themselves. Our intent is not to encroach on the basic human principle of free speech, but rather to maintain the integrity of the English Language.

Thank you,

Oxford University Press

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