Catch rat, kill and clean it, or buy from butcher already cleaned.Thread rat onto skewer made from DaveL's blasted all up to pieces cannon (oi tole him not to be tryin to fire is bawls wif dat rot gut likor for insted o gunphowder whot's made by that bugger over to loose nelly's)--blew da whole darn fink sky hi.

Plase skewered rat over nice fire and turn until crispy on outside and medium rare on inside-- bast freqwently with Peerless Petes sphesul sauce (also good for puttin on gangreen lags).

Serve on stick-- they makes a nice toof pik later

My mantra
Just save the farkin Gorillas will you! They don't have spell check- but they do need YOU/US...
www.gorillafund.org

I Ned Speil Cheek!!!!!!!!

I'm *not* the lowest rank on this ship. What about the laboratory mice? I tell them something and they jump straight to it. "Yes, Mr. Lister Sir, eek,eek."

InstructionsYe need to take a fryin' pan an' put some o' the Starfish Oil in ter it. Wait until the oil be nice an' 'ot, then put the turtle legs in ter it. Turn thee legs every foive minutes until they be gordon brown on all sides. I mean golden brown. When they is done, ye need to put them in ter thee stock an' vegy tables, which should be done at thee same toime. If ye find it too difficult, ye need one o' the ship's 'ands to do the stock for ye.

Ye take thee stock and thee 'erbs, which ye should chop with yer cutlass, and warm it up over ye fire until it be simmerin'. Whoile this be doin', ye take yer cutlass and the vegy tables and cut them up in ter small pieces (That be the vegy tables, not yer cutlass. A poirate without a cutlass be a poor one indeed). When thee stock be simmerin' noicely, ye will be takin' yer vegy tables an' puttin' them in thee stock.

Once thee legs is done, ye put them in thee stew an' let it simmer fer 2 hours with a lid on thee pan. Once this is up, it be ready ter serve.

Enjoy, me hearties.

Roland Deschain - Half prophet, half gunslinger, all Pastafarian!

"Since Alexander Pearce escaped, over 250 people have disappeared in the Tasmanian wilderness. No remains have ever been found." - Dying Breed