Relationships: The Inner Circle

“Everybody has blind spots and needs people to speak things into their lives even when they don’t want to hear it. Who do you have in your life that you can call when it’s inconvenient for them? You need to know the value of the right relationships that will lead you towards purpose.

The people who are your inner circle cannot be led by their feelings, they have to be led by their faith. If God can’t lead them, they can’t be speaking into you. Be around people that are committed to the ride even in the midst of challenges. Be around people that can see your future when you are still becoming.” – Mike Todd

I’ve recently listened to a lot of messages about friendships and relationships. The insights have been mind-blowing. One of the messages I listened to recently, was by Pastor Mike Todd. He started an amazing series on the inner circle and I just couldn’t help but share what I learned, hence this post. Pastor Mike Todd has been a blessing in my life. I started listening to him in 2017 and he has been one of my faves since then. His messages are so practical and he’s just too blessed. You’ll do yourself a disservice if you don’t listen to any of his messages. Please feel free to watch these videos about inner circles and be blessed.

He spoke about the circle of purpose and mentioned four things you need to fulfill purpose.

Active relationship wtih God

Discovering and cultivating your gifts

Answering the calling of God

Godly community

One thing that stood out for me was when He said “You can do good things without God but you cannot do God’s will without God” First of, you need an active relationship with God. Sundays after Sundays is not an active relationship with God. It’s about your heart, your daily commitment, discipline and desire to walk with God. It’s about a true devotion life. It’s not about how long you do it but how committed you are towards a cause. If you commit 30 minutes daily to start with, that’s okay. Just be consistent and keep growing.

Romans 12: 6 NLT

In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well.

Secondly, what are those things that you do well than others? Many times we get so caught up in a profession instead of purpose that we think our gifts are our profession and we cannot even see what God has gifted us with. It’s time to start valuing what maybe we have pushed to the side.

Once you’ve discovered your gifts, you need to answer the calling of God. We’ve gotten too complacent that we want to just use our gifts to gain money, to become popular but are we channeling those gifts to what God has called us to do? It might be using that gift in something you aren’t comfortable with. Let’s say your gift is singing but you are called to use your voice to minister to people in prison cells. You might say “but I’m not bold enough to talk to prisoners or to win their souls”, but the beautiful thing about God is that He doesn’t call people that are equipped but equips people that answer the call. The enemy will try to fill our minds with excuses of why we can’t reach purpose.

The fourth thing on your way to purpose is having a godly community. I’m going to address this majorly because I feel this is something we miss a big deal on our way to purpose and it’s my focus of this post.

Jonathan was supposed to be the heir to the throne. He was meant to be in the position that God called David to but Jonathan was in tune with what God was doing. Do you have people in your life who will say that this is what I’m supposed to step into but you’re the one God called to do it? If you don’t have a Godly community you cannot complete your purpose. People who are not perfect but whose directions are set towards Jesus. Not just people that are set on emotions. You can’t have a Godly community with lies and put up a facade.

You’re going to become like the people you continually associate yourself with. Don’t hang around people that don’t have anything you want. If they are not making you better or inspiring you, causing you to grow then you need to make that change. Your destiny is too great to waste it on people that are not adding value to your life.It’s not about hurting their feelings but it’s about you missing your destiny. It’s not enough just to focus on self-development, you have to also focus on what’s around you, what’s influencing you, what you are spending time and attention with. What you are unwilling to walk away from is where you will stop growing. If you know a person is pulling you down and you won’t make a change then you’ll get stuck in where you are. If you don’t get rid of the wrong people, you’ll never meet the right people. You may go through a season of being lonely but God will give you better and new friends. People that will push you up and not pull you down.

Some of the challenges we face are because we didn’t leave who God told us to leave. Are you holding on to what God asked you to let go of? Your seed can’t flourish in a negative environment. You don’t have to make a big announcement by saying “hey I’m leaving”, but little by little start spending less and less time with them. Don’t allow all these choke out your dreams, your vision, and your character. You should be nice to everyone but you shouldn’t spend your time with everyone. Be selective about who you allow in your life. Value what God has given you too much to put your seed in bad soil.

Godly relationships take vulnerability. Many people are getting away from godly relationships because they don’t like what comes with it. Offences are part of the game because people are still growing and are not perfect. Don’t jump off a godly relationship prematurely. Commit to the ride. Sacrifice time. This is why this relationship can’t be with a lot of people. Don’t give up on Godly relationships because it takes a lot of work and investment to go through.

Who are the people that can see where you are going and speak it into existence? Because life and death are in the power of the tongue. Have people who will encourage you. Do you have people to invest in your dreams? If you don’t have that, you are missing out on the circle of purpose that God wants you to have. True life change happens in small groups. Pray about it, ask God for discernment and to bring the right people your path that will propel you to your next level and would help you in making an impact in this world.