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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Can't we just have normal frosting roses, sprinkles, maybe a spermy-looking bunch of balloons? Even a beanbag-body clown would be ok. I mean, I try to avoid even being in the same room with yukky-looking creatures...do I really have to take a bite out of one with a side of Ben and Jerry's?

This is a Naked Mole Rat. Cousin to the rare Old Navy Sweater-Wearing Mole Rat. This cutie is interesting because he lacks the ability to feel pain.

Yeeeah. I kinda wish I had that trait right about now.

Maybe if we hadn't stored this confection in a grimy cabinet and put a ravioli under the sheets, we could have avoided this infestation, hmm?

And speaking of infestations...

Do you think if you made a cake like this out of Twinkies, it'd be twice as likely to survive a nuclear holocaust? Just wondering.

Hey, ever wonder what you'd get if you crossed a naked mole rat with a roach?

except for the ravioli, i'm kinda impressed by the bedbug cake. same with the roach- especially becuase he looks to be fondant free! i think those are a couple more cases of the subject matter being a wreck, but not the cakes per se. on the other hand, i thought the mole rat was the Montauk Monster.

I had to have a mouse removed from my cupboard last night, and another one this morning. (In a trap, husband removes.) So this cake really did not do it for me this morning. WHY!? WOULD ANYONE WANT A CAKE THAT LOOKS LIKE THAT?! And, YES, I am yelling! Oddly enough, the cake decorators did an awesome job recreating, but again I ask you WHY?!

This post is right up there with the gross podiatrist foot cakes for hurl-factor. REALLY needed a warning label.... "if you've already eaten breakfast or have a weak gag reflex, please skip this post" YUCK-O!

Did anyone notice that Naked Mole Rat had "Happy 9th" inscribed on the cardboard? 9th???? You got that for a 9-year old? I'm gonna guess it was for a really nerdy (in a good way) scientifically-inclined 9 year old.

Is it bad that my only question is: why are the teeth coming out of the naked mole rat's nose? I couldn't/wouldn't eat any of them, but I can totally see our zoo making the NMR cake a couple years ago when they unveiled that exhibit in our children's zoo, or the third cake when unveiling the insectarium.