Loveth turned to them. ‘Actually, Philomena, it is not. I just used the empty cup to borrow some relaxer from a friend!’

‘Oh God, my face!’ Philomena screamed.

‘What is happening to your face?’ Georgina said.

‘It’s burning!’

‘Just that?’

‘I’m not joking, my face is on fire! Help me please!’

Loveth quickly got up and guided her into the bathroom.

***

April opened the door and entered.

She saw Philomena sitting on the mattress with her whole face shinning like fried chicken.

‘What did you rub on your face?’ she asked Philomena.

‘Groundnut oil.’

‘What? Why?’

Georgina started to laugh. ‘Our sister here who is indeed a certified Chemical Engineer from St. Theresa’s Grammar School, Ukwu-ube went and rubbed Loveth’s perfumed hair relaxer on her face thinking it was body cream.’

April’s lips formed a sudden O. ‘Aw!’ she said. ‘And I’ve actually told Loveth to get rid of that rubbish Tessy gave her. The thing is too caustic and I guess by now it might have even expired!’

‘It literally burnt my face,’ Philomena said.

‘So sorry, dear,’ April said. ‘Who now asked you to rub groundnut oil on your face?’

Philomena pointed. ‘It’s Georgina,’ she said.

‘Actually, I recommended palm oil first and she refused,’ Georgina said in her defence.

April let out a small smile and shook her head. ‘Please, what’s in the kitchen?’ she asked, ‘I’m dead hungry.’

‘Pots, spoon and plates of course,’ Georgina returned.

‘Wish it had been your face that was burnt!’ April said and walked past.

***

It was some minutes past 6 in the evening.

April was lying on the bed, reading a textbook she’d borrowed from a course mate while Georgina sat on the chair, chatting with Abuchi on Whatsapp.

Philomena and Loveth were out to buy things for egg sauce.

A knock came on the door and April asked Georgina to please get it.

Georgina opened door and it was a guy called Frank. He lived in the lodge too but downstairs.

‘Yes?’ Georgina said.

‘Please I’m looking for Phil,’ the boy said.

‘Who is Phil?’

‘Phil, your roommate.’

‘Nnaa, please go and come back later, inu?’

‘Okay … but why?’

‘Come back later, oh.’ Georgina slammed the door.

***

When Philomena and Loveth walked in, Georgina told her about the boy who had come to look for her.

‘Oh, Frank, what did he say?’ Philomena said.

‘Shut up!’ Georgina said. ‘This is your fourth day here, how did you know him?’

‘I met him yesterday at the gate. They were playing ball and he was shirtless.’ Philomena placed one hand on her chest in desire. ‘Oops, he was such a sweaty sexy god!’

‘Blasphemy!’ Georgina muttered.

‘What?’

‘Nothing. Did you have a lick of his sweat?’

‘I so wish I had. Gosh, there are lots of cute boys in this compound!’

Georgina shook her head. She turned to April. ‘Madam, this is your specialty,’ she said. ‘Over to you.’

April stared softly at Philomena for a while. ‘Philomena,’ she called, ‘you see, there is a standard we have always maintained ever since we were here.’

‘What standard is that?’

‘We don’t mingle with boys in this lodge.’

‘And why is that?’

‘Because they are all loudmouths!’ Loveth shouted. ‘Show one your pant today and tomorrow they’ve all slept with you.’

‘How?’

April stood. ‘My dear, they are young growing boys constantly being nurtured by societal impulses. They would make fun with anything just to stay relevant.’

‘So you mean neither of you have ever had anything to do with any of the boys in this lodge?’ Philomena said.

‘No!’ Loveth shouted again.

‘Really?’

‘Yes!’

April made a gesture. ‘You are free to greet and smile with them,’ she said, ‘but that should be just about it and nothing else. If you need a man, you go out and get yourself one. In this world we live in where girls frequently get shamed for the same thing boys get praised for, every girl needs to wear her cloak of caution all the time.’

‘So what makes you think the men outside will not still insult and gossip about you?’ Philomena said.

‘Oh sure those who will will,’ April said, ‘but, my dear, you should know that distance deadens gossip.’

‘I don’t get that statement.’

‘Philomena, in this lodge I am April. Everybody knows that. Outside here, I am most likely to be ‘just one girl from that campus’. Spot the difference?’

Philomena was silent, just staring at April. It might not really be the words themselves that got her stilled, it could be the way April delivered them. With her characteristic grace and composure.

‘Thanks for the advice,’ Philomena came through at last.

April gave her a slight smile. ‘It’s nothing, girl. Just always remember that a girl is incomplete without her mystery. It’s all you’ve got so always guard yours cautiously.’ She turned to Georgina. ‘Gee Gurl, is there anything you have to say?’

Georgina’s lips went wide apart in a great yawn. ‘Nne,’ she called in a yawn-distorted voice, ‘the first thing you have to know is that a girl is incomplete without food in her stomach! So please, my dear, follow Loveth into the kitchen and make your elder sister proud!’

April picked a book from the table to strike Georgina and she ran into the bathroom.

***

Loveth’s sauce was delicious. Only April did not finish her yam slices. Gladly, Georgina was nearby to render a helping hand.

She did three things at the same time— munching her yam and slurping Loveth’s egg sauce, and still reading a blog story on her phone.

‘Georgina, why not drop your phone till you are done with your food?’ April said.

Georgina shook her head. ‘Mm-mm, this story I’m reading is just as delicious as this sauce!’

by Staff writer Famous American actor and drag queen, RuPaul , revealed on March 15, 2017, during an episode of Hollywood Today Live , that...

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