Monday, September 5, 2011

Cleanliness is close to...........craziness

Picture this-

you start off the day with 16 delicious Oz. of prune juice. the rest of your calorie intake consists solely of raspberry cranberry juice, and three teaspoons of straight olive oil. For all of you who thinks that this nightmare sounds like a dream- don't worry. it continues for three days.

gag, rinse, repeat

repeat

repeat

believe it or not- this isn't a chapter from a worst case scenario book, this is currently....my life.

oh yes, going on a cleanse sounds fun, but what did it really "cleanse" out of my system? my healthy appetite? my energy? my happiness?!?!?

if that was the objective, then i highly recommend this dietary change. (that is, if you have a couple extra hours to spare in the bathroom) but now that i am almost off of it (twelve hours to go, people!!) i am glad that i did it.

it's healthy to do something outrageously hard once in a while- to prove to yourself that you are, in fact, the bomb diggity.

so, if you're self esteem is running on empty, or you need a little HowdeeBangDaBoomble inyour la-dee-da life....

do something hard! do something that you never thought you could do!run a marathon!write a book!go skydive in Guatemala for goodness sake! (although DON'T do it without a parachute, there is a fine line between hard, and deadly)

anyways, go cleanse you life of boring. and if you need a little help, prune juice is on sale at Wal-mart.

WARNING: anything said in this post may and possibly should be disregarded, considering the mental state of the author....I'm running on juice, people!!!

3 comments:

And I just ate everything that wasn't limp or moldy in the refrigerator. Just came off a cleanse that makes yours sound like lunch at Tuscany. And if I didn't have refined taste and a strong sense of aesthetics, I'd describe a 24 hour clear liquids diet followed by prune juice x 1,000. Wait until you're 50+ my dear. Now back to carry-out samosas! (Join me!)

Let the records show that this is the most entertaining blog I've ever read. Love, The stranger....JK. (despite the eery comment from someone you definitly dont know, this is actually your cousin Laurel)