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Whether you voted for Donald Trump or not, he’s now the president of all… blah blah you know the rest. The day after the inauguration, millions of women and a peppering of men took to the streets in a global display for women’s rights and presidential discontent. The very same day, Donald Trump made a widely criticized, self aggrandizing freestyle speech straight off the dome on hallowed grounds at CIA headquarters, disputing photographic evidence of the inaugural crowd size. That alone was all the news that’s fit to print… until Press Secretary Sean Spicer, in his maiden voyage, took the lectern in the White House press briefing room.

Flanked by monitors displaying photos of Trumps inauguration viewed from the Capitol building, Spicer came in hot and forcefully accused the media of “false reporting” in an effort to “lessen the enthusiasm for the inauguration” by using photos that were “intentionally framed in a way to minimize the enormous support that had gathered” (for the historically least popular incoming president).

He didn’t stop there. Armed with untrue statistics, Spicer declared, “This was the largest audience to ever witness an inauguration, period, both in person and around the globe.” Spicer then marched out of the room and didn’t take any questions.

OK… well let’s fact check that statement. All you need to do is look at a photograph. By using my eyes, I can see that Trump’s inauguration attendance was sparse compared to presidents’ past. Saying the word “period” after a sentence, doesn’t qualify the statement as factual.

The media quickly struck back with puzzled pundits questioning the motive of Trump sending Spicer out to the press in such a bizarre childlike manner. Political junkies like myself were anxiously awaiting the administration’s narrative come Sunday morning as they made the rounds on the network TV circuit. The pushback was stunning.

In a remarkable exchange between NBC’s Chuck Todd and Trump spokeswoman Kellyanne Conway on “Meet the Press,” Todd pressed Conway on why the president would send out Spicer for the first time ever “to utter a provable falsehood.” Conway hubristically replied, “If we’re going to keep referring to our Press Secretary in those types of terms, I think that we’re going to have to rethink our relationship here. I want to have a great open relationship with our press.”

Like an abusive partner that doesn’t get her way and wields too much power in an unhealthy relationship, Conway subtly threatened the press – maybe we should just break up then. This marks the beginning of the end of the fourth estate’s role in the Trump administration.

Conway alarmingly added, “Don’t be so overly dramatic about it, Chuck. You’re saying it’s a falsehood… Sean Spicer gave alternative facts to that.” Alternative facts, as Chuck Todd pointed out, are falsehoods. There are no such things as alternative facts. Shortly after the interview, Merriam Webster tweeted the definition of the word fact as “a piece of information presented as having objective reality,” adding, “in contemporary use, fact is generally understood to refer to something with actual existence.” You know we’re in trouble when the dictionary has to take to Twitter.

It’s clear that Trump and his strategists are preparing the country for a departure from factual reporting which leads to the absence of accountability. The fact that they sent Spicer out to argue something that is so easily disproved, means they are laying the groundwork for a public soaked in disinformation. People will be forced to choose between their instinctual idea of truth or believing what the administration tells them. The more you muddy the water, the less you see through it all.

The Great Soviet Encyclopedia in 1952 defined disinformation as “the dissemination of false information with the intention to deceive public opinion.” The Russians have used it effectively since the 1920’s to subdue their own people and disrupt the consciousness of others. It is hard to draw conclusions, never mind solve problems, when people are working with different sets of “facts.” This tactic results in a counterproductive discourse that bears no traction in either direction, while the powers that be are able to manipulate the reality in whichever way they please. This is what happens when you allow “alternative facts.” We’d be blind not to acknowledge the similarities of Kremlin tradecraft and the current administration’s path toward social confusion.

It was easy to feel a difference on the first day of Trump’s presidency. Presidential he was not. He was still talking about the election, himself, how many Time magazine covers he’s been on, and how he’s “like a smart person.” He immediately tried to deny the gloomy feel of his rained-on speech, the small turnout and overall ominous vibe of the day he took the oath. It felt different. His first order of business with the media was to scold them for reporting the truth, and then threaten to break up with them if they didn’t fall in line.

It’s definitely a different America under Trump. An America where the president can force government agencies to shut down their Twitter accounts when they tweet information that’s unfavorable to the administration. An America where we are told to doubt our own eyes and believe a short-tempered statement telling us otherwise. An America where facts have alternative facts, and a free press that is not so free. An America where we write essays called “Are Facts Really Real?”

Well we have our two nominees for president. I think there has never been an election that had two candidates that reflect the times better than Clinton and Trump. We have an establishment candidate on the democratic side who led us through a “coronation” of sorts. And we have a reality star, drawing endless parallels to “Idiocracy”, that reflects the frustration of the populist wave that has been sweeping our country for the past 8 years. Since 2008, the veil of politicians and their cozy relations to the people that blockade our progression has been lifted. After no one was taken to task over derailing our economy, the rich got richer and the very same people who got us into a “lost decade” were tasked to pull us out of it. Politicians on both sides are guilty of spurring poor legislation, pay-day loan schemes, and an unfaltering level of student debt. Everyone from Paul Ryan to Debbie Wasserman Schultz has been exposed for who they are. An awakening is happening: where talking points, straw man arguments, partisan strategies, wedge issue placement, and all around bullshit have become unacceptable.

As an example of impeccable timing, Donald Trump runs for president as the whole country screams, “I’m as mad as hell and I’m not going to take this anymore!” At first, his remarks about Mexicans and the wall they’ll build for us stood as amusement. A feeling that reality television invaded our political dialogue for a quick visit became evident. Then the magic happened. We watched Trump, in what I consider the most entertaining election campaign of all time, eviscerate his competition with schoolyard quips, and name calling. At first, this strategy seemed unsustainable. But with huge help from the media blindly dispensing free air time that translated to positive coverage, Trump was able to be the last scam standing.

For the democrats, we watched a historical effort from Senator Bernie Sanders with his brand of left-leaning populism. As his support grew, income inequality and long held myths of capitalism were brought to the attention of the masses. All of a sudden, with an entire generation of young disappointed Americans behind him, Sanders’ socialist ideas were given a seat at the grown up table at Christmas. This campaign pulled Hillary to the left and made people question the long game of this widening class divide. Even the side that was running a successful establishment candidate was showing cracks, with unemployed debt-ridden college kids ready to burst through. But, as expected, Hillary prevailed and made history as the first female major party candidate for president.

So now we’re here…

Even before the party conventions have gathered, we’ve been offered a sneak peek into the general election. It’s obvious that Clinton’s camp is a well oiled political machine with hundreds under her employ. It’s also obvious that Trump has like five guys, none of which actually advise him. So we have one candidate with well staged speeches versus a guy who tweets impulsively. The fact that Twitter has turned into Trumps personal Associated Press wire has to mean the days are numbered for that social medium. But beyond the easy to spot stark differences between these candidates, I’ve been noticing a dark force foreshadowing violent times ahead.

Some weeks back, a Trump rally was met by protesters in what seems to be the new norm. The crowd outside quickly got out of control and many fights broke out. In a sad sight, one female Trump supporter was cornered. Protesters started throwing eggs that cracked upon impact and slowly gave way to gravity down her face. She tried to be defiant, smiling through it. Then more eggs. Then food that doesn’t crack and ooze. Then no more smiling. Fear. She was being pelted with objects as news cameras surrounded her… not to protect her, but to capture the “news.” My heart sunk watching this display. No one was right. This was not political discourse. What have we done?

Trump has made a habit of throwing rallies in locations that have a high minority population, Hispanic and the like, baiting a violent outcome. He’s successful almost everywhere he goes.

He is touching nerves that connect to race, immigration, and social responsibility. He’s garnered support from racists with xenophobia while pretending he is not using dog whistles to point out the “thugs” that disrupt his rallies. I think this is a dangerous experiment, and none of us are wearing protective gear. To see Americans fighting each other in violent scenes culminating all the bad parts of humans is truly saddening.

After the largest mass shooting on American soil, Trump congratulated himself on his view of Muslims and insinuated that our president was complicit in such terrorist attacks. This is different. This election is between a status quo establishment hawk and a madman that is still shocked he made it this far. It’s hard to imagine what a debate between these two candidates would look like.

As we look ahead to election day, I think we have to make a choice on how we, as the people, behave during this election. We can be civil or we can be animals. We can take our choices for what they are or become part of the problem in the choices we have. We can fall victim to “false facts” and galvanize this divide, or we can keep a strong contact with reality.

My hope is peace. My hope is that we don’t allow ourselves to be a part of the demagoguery that is ever present in Trump’s news cycle. My hope is that we don’t engage people from our home towns in bitter Facebook posts. Don’t let the system whose been playing us this whole time play us again. Let’s all be the adults in the room and navigate this shit-show with composure and intelligent thought. No memes. No fake graphs with fake statistics. No noise. Just truth. If that’s what we’re left to work with, I have hope for all of us. That way, in four years, we can elect a true revolutionary that will change the system the way we all want it to be changed.

As time goes on, it’s become clear to me that nobody has things completely figured out. People fake it. Everyone fakes it. In the age of social media, people have become their own public relations firm. Every day people fire out posts, or modern day press releases, letting everyone know that they’re killing the game. Whether it’s a post about a promotion, a weekend trip to Aruba, or a new puppy, it always seems that the person posting is in full control of their life. If anything, the flood of our “friends” feeds passively causes us to question our own “status.” Don’t mean to air quote the hell outta the last sentence but it’s important to note that friends and status, in this case, are purely abstract concepts in this virtual reality we have created for ourselves. This onslaught of information tucks itself in our subconscious here or there. The more these little tidbits of info store themselves away, the more we as individuals question our own path. It’s almost a form of social masochism that we willfully engage in. That being said, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to gauge where you stand in life. It’s easy to convince yourself that you don’t have your life in order by allowing your mind to perpetuate the fantasies that are being sold to you by your own friends.

I think the first step of seeing the forest for the trees is to realize that none of what you see is real. People’s posts are merely marketing ploys and you’re a potential customer. Someone posting a vacation selfie is no different than Windex telling you there’s 20% more in this bottle. It’s a pitch. It looks like a good deal… I’ll buy it. Twenty percent more than what? By the time you ask that question, the Windex is under your kitchen sink. Transaction complete. Scrolling down a social media feed should be visualized as strolling down a city street in a studio backlot. All that you see is a facade and a very convincing one at that. Yes it looks great on screen, but if you try to walk into that corner store to buy some Jawbreakers after the director calls cut, you’ll be a very disappointed person with a pristine jaw. You simply can’t draw parallels from a fabrication to your reality. Recognizing this can snap you out of whatever false reality you bought into.

In horse racing, which I don’t condone, horses wear blinkers. Blinkers, often referred to as blinders, are intended to keep the horse focused on the track ahead, subtracting distractions such as other horses, massive crowds and other visual stimuli. Before social media took over how we operate, most of us had our blinders on. We kept in touch with the people closest to us and relied on performance reports and work gossip to spur our professional tenacity. Then Facebook came along, ripped off our blinders, and we saw everything. We saw too much. Not only did we see what our co workers were up to, we saw what Danielle from 8th grade is doing. All of a sudden our mind put us in a race where our senses are overwhelmed, and our subconscious makes comparisons. Now it’s up to us to curb this intake and decide what’s real.

Even without social media, it’s a false assumption to believe everyone is as rock solid as they appear. Many people are in a perpetual cycle of self improvement. It’s only natural to want to be a better person. Whether physically or emotionally, this want to improve tricks us into perceiving ourselves as not good enough. All of us, except for Tony Robbins, fall into this trap. This means that even the guy who looks like he’s swimming in a pool of happiness and riches, Scrooge McDuck style, still wants to be better. When it comes to self satisfaction, it’s vital to keep focused on what makes you happy, not how happy the next guy is.

In my line of work we joke that your peers are quietly hoping you fail. It was pretty depressing writing that last sentence, but it’s close to truth. When that’s the environment you exist in, it’s important to maintain a sense of self and be plugged into your reality. I recently had dinner with a friend who is a famous comedian with a new TV show. He’s the epitome of professionalism. It was so refreshing to hear how he was handling his success. This is a guy that I imagined would be incredibly prepared for, almost downplaying, his huge network opportunity and all that came with it. Instead I saw a guy asking the same questions I would have asked. Worrying about many of the same things I would be concerned about. He was holding hands with accomplishment and insecurity at the same time. He wasn’t behind a keyboard maintaining an image, he was a friend being a human being.

No one has it all figured out. The answers are not found in an Instagram photo or a Facebook update. The answers are found in real life and within yourself. Not everything is what it seems. We’re not the rapper in the video with champagne, mansions, and yachts. We’re the rapper that left the video shoot and is sleeping at his Mom’s house until this rap thing works out. That’s keeping it real. Do your best to stay in reality and avoid becoming mesmerized by the flash and flare of someone else’s story. Because, as it turns out, you’re doing just fine.

Hair and Teeth Pro-Tip: Deactivate your Facebook account once a year for at least a month. Taking a vacation from useless distracting information will boost your self esteem and productivity. Your account will still be there when you get back and you’ll use it more sparingly upon your return.

I’ve been closet-sober for 90 days. If there is one thing to be ashamed of in today’s society, it’s sobriety. If you’re not drinking drinks and showing the world that you can party, you’re a loser. After the first of the year, I usually slow down my drinking or stop altogether. It’s fresh off the holiday season, where binging on food and alcohol has become as normal as running to the mall on Thanksgiving day to get a deal on a Chinese import. Never mind a “cheat day,” most of us have a cheat season. Naturally, the pendulum needs to swing back the other way – so I like to take charge and initiate the reverse motion. For me, a proactive action eases the task at hand and lessens my own resistance to change. It’s easier to drive through a snowstorm than to sit shotgun – the driver at least has the sense of control while the guy sitting next to him is straight shitting his pants.

January 1st is a good reset button for me. The new year tricks your brain into believing you have a clean slate, even though they’re just numbers on a grid hanging on your kitchen wall. I’ve found that picking a date to start something or to drop a bad habit is the most effective method to affect change. Whether it’s the new year, your birthday, your dog’s birthday, June 26th, October 9th, or whatever, pick a date and stick to it. I kicked tobacco using this method. A date, and a decision to exercise willpower is all you need.

For me alcohol has never been a good companion. Actually, he’s kind of a dick. Either way, I’ve cut down heavily from the amount I used to drink. I was never an alcoholic, just a binge drinking enthusiast. But as you get older you get healthier. There’s a wider reference from which to pick up good habits and you have a better understanding of your body. For me, not drinking after the holidays allows my body to detoxify and gives my liver a break from having to deal with a steady stream of poison.

Come spring or summer, I can then enjoy a cold one after a surf or sitting on the beach with friends. And as the holidays approach, I can celebrate the spirits merrily as I know a period of cleansing awaits me after the ball drops. The key is to ease gently back into the drinking. After a prolonged period of not drinking alcohol, my tolerance drastically drops. Needless to say when I start drinking again I don’t get a 40 ounce of Olde English Ice and pound it outside of a liquor store. I usually phase in with red wine and beer at first, then gradually add the hard stuff over time. Because of this seasonal habit, I now enjoy alcohol like an adult (most of the time). This year I think I’ll be abstaining from alcohol until my brother’s wedding this Memorial Day weekend. Dates. That would make it one-hundred-forty-seven days without alcohol. Not that I’m pretending I’m not counting. This gives me a good break from booze and a half way decent chance at remotely pulling off a summer body.

You are in control of your actions. I’ve found that being able to turn vices on and off is extremely empowering and allows one to feel more in alignment with self control and balance. It’s not about cutting stuff out… live a little. This is it guys, you’re eating the main course. So season it, throw some hot sauce on and enjoy. I’ve become acutely aware of the importance of balance. “Everything in moderation” was kinda right. I’m familiar with addiction and understand it’s power. I know some personalities can’t dabble. But if you can, and want to add to your overall health at the same time, set some limitations and healthy rewards. So when the snowstorm comes, sit in the driver’s seat… and wheel this thing.

Hair and Teeth Pro-Tip: Download a goal app on your phone like Goal Tracker or HabitBull. It’s extremely helpful in keeping yourself in line with your goals and habit limitations.

Phife Dawg (Malik Taylor) of A Tribe Called Quest passed away this week. It is a huge loss for the hip hop culture and music in general. Tribe was my favorite. Q-Tip and Phife were my ultimate dream team. The two emcees complemented each other perfectly, yet I was always proud of Phife when he was given the chance to shine on his own on certain tracks. I learned a lot from Phife as a professional. He was known as the five foot assassin and that’s how he approached his work. He would arrive to the studio or show, open his microphone case, connect to the equipment, and methodically dismantle detractors with his lyrical arsenal – he was a hired gun. Never did he involve himself in gimmicks or any sort of style that could be considered wack. He was widely respected among his peers and back-packers alike, providing an added dimension to a group that was already artistically eclectic.

But what always stuck with me was Phife’s relationship with his microphone. He talked about writing rhymes, being judged by critics, his freestyle prowess, all while involving his closest ally – the mic.

“The micis in effect so you know I’m never stallin’, Walking through the door and all them suckers started haulin’, Talk a lot of trash but no one can seem to beat it, Pull out your microphone and watch the Phifer make you eat it.”

Phife talked of the microphone as if it was an honor to even use it. Just plugging it in was a blessing. In the above rhyme Phife lets you know that we’re under the jurisdiction of the microphone and that substandard emcees will suffer the consequences by law. The mic being the supreme decider – the moral authority of hip hop. Phife often addressed the microphone like a longtime co-worker, a confidant, a consigliere. There wasn’t another emcee with such high regard for the function and code of the mic. The respect that Phife displayed was obvious, natural, and noble. Phife taught me that the mic, above all, should be respected and maintained with high standards. That means both the physical upkeep of it and most importantly, the sounds that actually come through it. Like a Michelin-star chef expediting food at the pass with a close eye for detail in the pursuit of perfection, the mic has the last say of what’s being served. Although it is a tool, the microphone shares an extremely intimate relationship with the mic holder. Only when they work together in a symbiotic flow, do they both achieve optimal purpose.

Because of Phife, I always handle my mics with care. When I’m doing shows at our theaters in Vegas or Hollywood, I always use the same one. I keep it separate from the others so there’s no confusion. I never let anyone grab it. The honor of holding it cannot be freely dispensed to strangers. After a show, I hand it directly to my sound guy like I’m waiting in the car, watching it walk through the front door safely before I drive away. Respect. Just like a fine European automobile, if you take care of it, it will take care of you. Phife taught me to pay attention to the sound quality at live performances. He taught me to be nice to the sound guys and be respectful of their equipment. He taught me that whether you’re doing a room of thirty five people or thirty-five-hundred, the mic is going to be there with you no matter what. Phife taught me that whether it’s a Shure or a Sennheiser, it’s up to you to work with the person controlling the boards to make it sound right. Phife taught me to cringe when someone drops the mic in an effort to be funny. Phife taught me that your microphone is your companion and the governing body of your work. It allows you to live out your dreams performing and spreading happiness to others. It is the thing that makes those paychecks appear in your mailbox. Your mic allows you to live. So thank you for that Phife. And as you leave us, we’ll remember your most telling line about the relationship with your microphone:

With the world breaking apart at the seams, in addition to the over saturation of social media and blogs, I figured there is no better time to release my first blog on this website. First of all, thank you for checking out the site. My goal is to make this a hub for everything in my world. I will not push an agenda upon you or subtly slide in some severely questionable views in hopes to taint your conscious into believing that any of this matters. I’m on my own out here. I’m a comedian who makes my money holding microphones in front of people that have more money than me. I’m not lost in the rat race, yet I’m racing the shit out of these rats. I’m in a world of celebrity, faux connection, self doubt, rejection, and social confusion. Through these blogs I hope to navigate this landscape and shine some light on figuring it all out. I want to discuss issues that get me going while sharing with you the often surreal life experiences that make me who I am. I have a diverse background which includes working on capitol hill, fighting for the homeless, saving animals, and running a celebrity filled variety show surrounded by every vice one could imagine. This perspective may or may not appeal to you. Either way, I promise, it will be worth a glance. The state of the hair and teeth is strong.