Halloween Special. The tale of the dreaded dreads.

So my dreadlocks are getting closer to a whole year old. Being almost 9 months old you’d think that somewhere along the line I’d probably regret them. Well that’s what people without dreadlocks assume.

In fact the whole experience has been the total opposite.

Having dreadlocks really is an experience, not just a hair style.

Nothing can prepare you for the weird looks, strange questions, the total change of some people’s opinions of you.

In order to choose dreadlocks, I had to accept that a lot of people would not accept me. That they would look at my hair and judge me or turn away. So being totally ok with that first of all was really my first step before even touching my hair.

Once I finally committed and did them all, I then had to face the world. I was over the moon and very proud of myself for ‘letting go’ if not a little self-conscious. I knew people would talk, I knew people would walk away. I was going to wait for school holidays as I didn’t want my hair to influence what school teachers or other school mums would think of my kids. In the end I knew I just had to do it.

Christmas holidays or not!

My hair is in no way related to how I raise my children. With or without dreads I’d still treat them the very same.

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So I woke one morning determined to try out the backcombing method which I’d been researching for weeks.

I began with one.

I got excited and created another 2.

I’d originally planned to just stick with 3 and see how I felt about them in a few days but as the day wore on, I couldn’t help myself. By the weekends….end, I had a head full.

I was over the moon.

I did it.

People don’t like change, they don’t like different even if it doesn’t affect them in any way at all directly.

People I knew kind of looked away or made eye contact, specifically avoiding to look at my hair. It was like some scary taboo thing now sitting on my head. Perhaps a cobra and if they looked at it, it would strike! Inside I giggled. “It’s just hair!” I’d think to myself. I’d comment on your new hair colour or cut even if I don’t exactly like it.

It’s just nice to acknowledge it.

But instead most people, if they still had the guts to talk to me, avoided the whole situation up top there…..

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My hair since putting it in dreadlocks has not done a single thing I’ve wanted it to do. Everyday I guess has been a ‘bad hair day’ but in saying that I’m enjoying that it is just doing what it wants and not once have I thought it’s looked bad.

I’m in love and I cannot see myself without them. Now that they’ve settled into what they are, they are bumpy and knotty, messy and all over the place, 2 have actually decided to almost merge into one.

I figure they are lovers or something.

Whatever, go for it.

The biggest changes have been within me. All because of my hair! I feel so much freer of everything I once thought was important. For example the moment I began my dreads I knew I would have to let go of everyone’s opinions. No longer could I concern myself with what people did or did not think. Yes, they probably gossiped for a while…oh well, hope it was worth your time to chat about my hair.

This was just for me.

Me alone.

I felt like I’d put up a fragile barrier once my hair was done. Those who were only able to see me for my hair couldn’t, well didn’t want to get through. Those who saw my choice as a sign of personal strength pushed on through.

I love the way a simple thing like hair has totally changed the type of people who want to be around me.

I’ve grown so much. With each bump, with each new knot…..I’ve learned to just be me, to just accept that perfection is just a vague illusion and that there really is no such thing.

I’ve learned so much about others and their closed minds. New things or different things really do scare some. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders and my hair kind of was like the ticket to being able to just…I don’t know…..breathe easy.

I feel like I’ve gained a new kind of confidence within myself.

Everything seems easier and life seems lighter.

I feel like there is just so much more me-ness to….me.

It really is hard to describe just how much my silly hair now means to me.

I guess you’d have to get some dreads to walk the path I have and experience the changes of others toward you and the changes you make toward yourself.

It is something I didn’t expect. To kind of awaken.

To become more carefree.

Anyway. My dreads are now 9-ish months, I plan to keep them forever. Slowly but surely I’ve been wrapping them in 14k gold and sterling silver wire and adding little crystals. If ever I decide to get rid of them, I plan to have them all decorated in gold and silver and jewels so I can shave for a cure and auction off each bedazzled dread. I’ve already gone through the phase of adding felted wool dreads which then led me to making them to sell to others through The Eco Princess. I won’t wear them again until perhaps winter. They were so very cosy and warm.

I added a tiny silver bell just this morning but I’m not sure how long it will stay especially if it tinkles away while I’m trying to sleep.

I love that they have a life of their own, growing and changing and doing their own thing.

Sophie still doesn’t like them but that’s ok. I don’t want her to think that just because I am her mum that I am not a person. I will always probably do and say things that my kids don’t always like. Bella still wants some, Violet and Molly like them and Buddy loves to look for little treasures through them when we sit quietly together.

To me, they a like a little representation of life itself. As much as we tend to it and straighten it, bleach and dye it, cut and shape it….there is nothing more beautiful than nature doing as it pleases.

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A little extra info on dread heads.

Most dreadheads do wash their hair. Personally I wash mine every 2-3 days (that’s more often than some non-dreaded people) Majority rule is once a week, but like I said, it depends on the individual.

Dreadheads I find to be very open honest people. They’re connected to a bigger picture, I guess it could be called a life switched on to the natural order of things.

Dreadheads I’ve found to be some of the kindest, warmest, most intelligent people I’ve met. Seriously….meet some!

Just because someone has dreads does not mean they are criminals, drug addicts or unemployed -or a hippie!- take people for what they are, not for what they ‘appear.’ Don’t be afraid!

Lastly, it’s just hair people. We’re going into an age where if you don’t have a tattoo your weird and they are forever!….so come on…..?!

Yager

Married with 5 children should say it all; The insides of my head and heart are splattered all over this blog! This isn't your typical mummy blog. Sometimes I say too much, sometimes not enough. The cake on my face says it all. I think honesty is the best quality someone can have. I think happiness is the best choice someone can make.
email me: yagerbabies@gmail.com