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dreamer

Tomorrow morning I leave little ole MO, the only state I know to go to T-E-Double N- E -SS- E Boys (bonus points if you know what song that comes from)

I’m really excited. I’m really nervous. God is in control.

My best friend at school Jessica is also working with CSM this summer at the NYC sight. So check out her blog and mine this summer to stay caught up on the adventures!

I will have limited computer time but will blog whenever I get the chance and fill mom in whenever I can as well.

Please feel free to e-mail me or comment or mail me anything you want! If I don’t return your phone calls please know it’s just because I wake up at 6:30 and finish with groups around 9-10:30 and we don’t use our phones at ministry sites.

Here is my address for the summer though in case you feel like making my day and being old school with some sweet snail mail! 🙂

I love you friends. Have a great summer. Challenge yourself. Dare to love completely. Seek reckless abandon. Let Jesus push you beyond your limits. Grow. Bask in the love that He has for you. Sweat that love. And wear your sunscreen.

With our kids at youth group we are challenging them to be owned by Christ and to own Him. We are challenging them to be aware of how they act at school and home and what that says about them when they say I follow Christ. We are teaching them (sorry Whitney have to say it) to be authentic.

I think it’s something adults and youth leaders have yearly challenged their kids with. And honestly, they learn it best by seeing it acted out by the adults. So, if you’re up for the challenge, start with one day a week and live this song. Pray it, like really pray it. Be warned that it will rock your world in joyous and painful ways. You will lose the support of people while you gain the encouragement of others. You will see pain that you overlooked before and notice how far small acts of Christ-like love carry. You will be heartbroken and healed by the opportunities. You will be scared and confused. You will be changed and have the chance to change the world. And that’s just with one day.

What would your world look like if this is how you viewed it once a week?

What if you began to truly cultivate a heart and eyes like His? What would your life look life if this song became your heart?

I always think of things to post when I’m in bed. 🙂 last night was no exception. I was laying there with my night time music on and heard this song and it just slapped me in the face. Then I checked out for a bit and then heard another song that just built perfectly on the first one.

Bah. I tried to link my itunes to here and can’t figure it out! And well, I don’t much feel like figuring it out. So I will give you lyrics and you will have to use your ninja powers to find the tune if you want it.

The first one is by a new band (in my world) called Nevertheless. The song is I Needed This All Along

I am here
But am I still alive?
You broke me down
But somehow I survived
I never thought that I could leave it
I can't believe it
It's gone
You'll never hear me say
That I wanted it this way
It hurts me every time I breathe
No matter what I'm told
I'm left out feeling cold
But I know I needed this all along
Say farewell
To everything that binds
Take this heart
It was never even mine
I never thought that I could leave it
I can't believe it
It's gone
.
Your bloodstains and scars
Are much worse than ours
And Your breaking and healing
Has taken me this far
I never thought that I could leave it
I can't believe it
It's goneI was struck with how disappointed we can become with where we are. And well, it's gonna be ok.
Then I heard a Jeremy Camp song called Beyond Measure and one line stuck out to me.
The fog has finally cleared to see,
The beautiful life you’ve given me
To feel the breeze of my newborn’s gentle breath
With one to walk hand in hand,
To share this life that you have planned
It’s like a storybook with dreams
That are meant to see every next step is an extraordinary scene
[CHORUS]
I know that I’ve been,
Given more than beyond measure,
I come alive when,
I see beyond my fears
I know that I’ve been given more than earthly treasure,
I come alive when
I’ve broken down and given you control
I’ve faced a great tragedy,
But have seen the works of what you bring
A display of faith that you give,
I don’t know if I will ever understand
The depth of what it is you’ve done inside,
But I know I won’t find any worth apart from you
Everything that I have
Has been given so unselfishly
And shown that even when I don’t deserve
You always show the fullness of your love
So, when you find yourself in a place you never would have thought, just know that the fog will clear when you give up control.
Give it up.
Give it up.
Give it up.
Give it up.
Give it up.
Give it up.
Give it up.

I can not remember what year it is. Twice now I have had to ask mom if it’s 2009 (i think it’s 2010). Bah.

I feel since it’s a new year I should type some inspirational post, but I’m not really inspirational or inspired.

I feel I should do a 2008 in review. But the past is the past good and bad.

I feel I should do a picture review. But you all have seen my pictures.

I feel I should make resolutions. But I can’t resolve to do anything without Jesus and he didn’t send me a list yet. And considering what I ate yesterday, I think I already broke the one I was thinking of.

I feel I should find something profound to say, but Danielle has not updated anything for me to steal.

I feel I should have a new header. But I’m really not good at that stuff and would just get frustrated.

I think some of you might think I’m a pouty patty, but truly I’m not. 🙂

So those are all things you won’t see in my first post of 2009. I’m not really sure what this year will be but I think it’s a year of dreams. A year to let some go. A year to see some come true. A year to explore what God implants in my heart. A year to be fearless and reckless of living out a dream. I’m more of an idea girl than a dream girl. But I think that just might change. I make no promises though.

So, as I have sat around and eaten a pan of rice crispy treats and enjoyed homemade strawberry limeades, I thought up some potential blog posts.

In 2009 you may see:

*To release or relish: What to do with dreams

*Babysitters club: Jody Training

*If you chew like that we can’t be friends

*Boots with the fur; Hats with balls

*Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego

*No

*When I grow up

Happy New Year Friends. I hope the things you enjoyed in 2008 will be good memories and continued in 2009. I pray the pain you felt in 2008 will not disappear but will be used in a way you may not understand to bring peace and growth. I pray we are all brave enough to start the year realizing how dirty we all are without God’s grace and willingly grab hold of it and live it.