I agree - that's irrelevant as the OP wasn't in a relationship when she was 10 and her boyfriend was 20. That would be a COMPLETELY different thread! Most people's age gaps are pretty sick when you work back to when one of them was a child.

The truth is that there is no right or wrong answer - what matters is that you are happy, can trust this person, and that you both feel on a similar level.
Sadly we never make decisions in life knowing absolutely everything, but think about your future carefully. Where do you see yourself in 5, 10 years time?
Hope this helps, and I wish you courage whatever your decision. All the best. x

I don't think age really matters to be honest. My sisters 15 and she's with someone 9 years older than her. As long as you're partner's good to you and you're both happy, then it's no-one elses business And don't worry about telling your parents

(Original post by Anonymous)
Am currently in a relationship with someone ten years older than me, (Im 20, they are 30). I know I am coming up to the point where Ill have to tell my family about my partner, but am unsure how to do it as I feel that they will be under the impression that Im being taken advantage of.
Many of my friends believe that I should get with someone my own age. As a lot of people on here are around my age, I thought Id get some honest thoughts from my TSR peers, forums tend to make people more honest as they are so anonymous.
In summary, Id like to know how many of you think that being in a relationship with someone ten years older than you when you are 20 is bad idea, and if anyone has any senisble advice to give me about how to broach the subject with my family, Id be glad to hear it. Cheers guys!

I am also in a relationship with someone 30 years old, and I am 20. I don't think it matters at all. HOWEVER. In my experience, whilst the age gap may not pose a problem now, it may do so in the future. Unfortunately we are now experiencing problems such as attitudes to cleaning the flat (although obviously this is not exclusive to age gap relationships!) social lives (I kind of just want to be young and free with my friends and he just sees them as too young) futures (he wants to have kids, i want to have kids in about 10 years) uni (im not at uni yet, living in halls after living together may be a problem) and so on..(sorry can't really be bothered to go into every aspect).

Whilst I'm not suggesting this would happen to you, I find I sometimes feel patronised and belittled. This may just be due to his personality (he is quite arrogant) If we're having a debate it's as is there is no way he could be wrong, he is older and he knows more.

Another problem is that you made find him telling you what to do. It's more to do with the person feeling that they want to protect you from mistakes they may have made at your age, but it's still an issue.

Having said all this, there are many many people who make age gap relationships work. My experience is unique to me and not necessarily rule for all. I didn't have much of a teenage life due to illness and now want to live my 20s as a should so this may be the big influence on my view.

Give it a try, but do realise it wont be the same as a relationship with someone your own age; this sounds obvious, but it's easy to do.

My stepmum met my dad wehn she was 17 and he was nine years older. They've stayed together almost 10 years now and here very happy together.
As long as the age gap is too freeky you'll be fine 10 years is nothing once your older.

i think it depends on the man. Like if he has been the sort of person who always goes for girls around the age of 18- 21ish then no. But if he just likes you because you are you and your maybe the first partner he has had who is a lot younger them himslef then its all good. good luck with telling your parents

I'd seriously question the mindset of anyone who wanted to date someone 10 years older (or younger) then themselves when you're only around 20. He may 'love' you, and you may 'love' him... but honestly; do you really expect your lifestyle and life experiences would be anywhere near his?

(Original post by Reue)
I'd seriously question the mindset of anyone who wanted to date someone 10 years older (or younger) then themselves when you're only around 20. He may 'love' you, and you may 'love' him... but honestly; do you really expect your lifestyle and life experiences would be anywhere near his?

(Original post by tinktinktinkerbell)
my lifestyle was (and still is) very much like my bfs

A 32yr old acting like a 20yr old? Hmmmm..

And as always, there are exceptions to the rule.. however I very much expect the % of relationships which actually last for any decent amount of time where there is a large age gap is considerably less then those who are of similar age.

And as always, there are exceptions to the rule.. however I very much expect the % of relationships which actually last for any decent amount of time where there is a large age gap is considerably less then those who are of similar age.

more like a 20 year old acting like a 32 year old, back then i would have much rather went with a older man than someone 20/21 who was very much into going out clubbing/drinking/taking drugs etc as i wasnt into any of that which i think is why i got on with my bf cause he had gone past that 'needing to go out on the lash' all the time stage