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Thursday, 11 July 2013

Planning the Perfect Romantic and Seductive Date Night –
Part 10 of 10

To round off this series of posts on date nights we’re going
to take a look at the concept of getting feedback post-date night. I’m going to
ask you to discuss how your date night went!

Now this sounds way more severe than it actually is! We’re
not talking post-date meetings to give feedback with formal minute taking,
agendas, feedback forms and actions. But it’s worth mentioning that at the very
least you could have a conversation with your partner at some point the next
day, for example, about how date night went. Did you both enjoy it? What was it
that you enjoyed? What would you both like to do differently next time? etc.

If you didn’t quite get what you wanted on your date night
then getting feedback will also help you discover what you can do next time to
get closer to some of what you want at the end of the date. Now I know that
having said this I’m contradicting what I said earlier about date night not
being totally about you getting what you want at the end of it, but I’ll pretty
much guarantee that that’s what will be on your mind at some point during date
night, so if you haven’t had the success that you want this time, then go ask
for the feedback for next time. Do it subtly though otherwise you may just as
well come out and ask the rather direct question of “why didn’t we have sex
last night?”, and that’s really not the greatest of direct questions to come
out and ask!

Wednesday, 10 July 2013

Over the course of these posts on date nights we’ve covered
loads of topics, but so far we’ve mostly covered ideas on ‘staying in’ date
nights. In today’s post we’re going to cover some going out date night ideas.

Going out date
nights

So then - going out or staying in, does it really matter?
No, not really! The main thing is that you both commit to spending time
together with no other distractions. If you remember that rule and that one
alone then you’ll be off to a great start.

Let’s get going with today’s post and the ‘going out’ date
night ideas…

1. Ideas for higher cost date nights:

The first and most obvious idea is for you to
take your partner out to dinner at a local restaurant. Now it doesn’t
necessarily have to be a fancy restaurant (fancy restaurants may help some of
your partners feel well and truly pampered and spoilt though, whilst making
other partners totally unable to relax due to the poshness of the whole
occasion, you know your own partner best so my advise is to choose wisely and
accordingly), but in the end anywhere will do, but just as long as you can both
relax and talk easily.

Take a trip to see a show together (with dinner
first perhaps?), relax and chat over drinks in the interval, and snuggle up
together holding hands during the performance.

Cinema – go and see a romantic film (it really does need to be one that
your partner wants to see as well though! i.e. avoid that totally blokey action
movie that your partner is likely to hate), snuggle up at the back of the
cinema, hold hands, kiss lots and generally be 16 again! Worth noting though
that this one (and the show one too) aren’t ideal, because you don’t get the
opportunity to talk, and therefore to connect, much.

2. Ideas for zero to low cost date nights out:

Go for a walk together; hold hands, enjoy a
beautiful view, escape your house, take a picnic, randomly stop and snog, get a
new perspective on things, go breathe some of that clever fresh air stuff. All
that and you are getting some exercise too, perfect!

Eat dinner together at home (just the two of you
ideally), but then have pudding and coffee at that local expensive restaurant
instead.

Go take a trip down memory lane (preferably a
nice memory for the both of you though!) - drive down it, walk down in or just
visit it. Perhaps do a return tour of where you first met, drive by the first
house you rented or owned together (talking about the romantic (or sexy!)
things you did in each place), go back to the first place you kissed (and kiss
there again), go back to where you proposed (and get down on one knee in a
sillyish way and tell your wife you love her very much) or go to a view that
you both love and watch the view!

Really want to go to the theatre, but simply
can't afford it? Then perhaps find out where your local college or University
is and if they have a drama department or theatre group. They might put on cut
price shows and you can snuggle up at the back of their theatre instead of the
super-expensive one.

Rather go to a grown up theatre production? But
you've got kids and you can't afford both a babysitter and the price of a show?
Then try a matinee performance whilst the children are at school (you've then set
the day up well for a fine evening together later).

Laughter is both a great medicine and a great
way to relax – so drop in on an open mic night at a local comedy club - it'll
be way cheaper than going to see a top named comedy star. It might not be quite
as 'laugh out loud', but you'll both be out of the house, having a giggle
together, holding hands - and you never know - you might even get to see a brilliant
comedy genius talent before they become famous, then you can brag about it
later on in the decade.

Rendezvous in an exclusive hotel - you don’t
need to book a room, both of you put on some fine clothes and stroll into the
place like you own it, meet your partner at the bar at a pre-arranged time -
the drinks might be mighty expensive, but it'll make you both feel great to be
doing something a little bit different and may well rekindle those first date
nerves and passions!

And if none of these are any good at all then
try the ‘date nights in’ ideas from last week’s post.

3. Going out date night tips:

The following section will help you get the best out of your
date night out…

If you’ve both still got children at home and
are planning on going out on a date night, then you’ll quite obviously need to
get someone to look after your children! Whether you are leaving them at home
being looked after by someone else, or if you are taking your children to
family or friends houses to be looked after then make sure that the person that
you’ve left your children with is someone that your partner is happy with.
Ideally avoid the local village nutcase, otherwise it’s unlikely that your
partner will relax as much as you’ll need her to. Do the sensible stuff to
ensure that your partner can relax, i.e. making sure that the person who’s
looking after your children has your mobile phone number, your partners as
well, and for example, if you are going out to a restaurant, the restaurants
phone number. It’s also well worth getting it right in your babysitters head
what would constitute an emergency that necessitated a phone call to you, then
you won’t both get disturbed with non-urgent stuff.

If you’ve got a babysitter at home looking after
your children then you could even go as far as pre-arranging with someone else
that you trust (i.e. perhaps either yours or your partners parents) to act as
the babysitters first point of contact if there is an issue. The benefit of
this is that your partner isn’t sat there on date night with you on tenterhooks
just in case the phone rings with a problem, because someone else is the first
line of defence.

The thing that your partner sees as the
seductive bit is that you’ve been thinking about her, about her pleasure, about
what will help her relax, that you’ve gone out of your way to help her relax
and that you’ve put in some effort. We’re talking the simple stuff here, nothing
complex;

So… having arranged the babysitter.

Having booked the table at the restaurant.

Having helped your partner out with stuff that’s
on her list of to-do’s so that she isn’t thinking of them whilst she’s on date
night with you.

Having made sure that there’s a nice bottle of
something sparkling (or similar) sat waiting in the fridge for you both when
you get home, with two glasses in your bedroom ready and waiting.

That’s it for today. To round off the posts on date nights
we’re going to look at date night feedback tomorrow! Yes, that’s right –
feedback. Bear with it, it’s definitely a very useful thing for finding out
from each other how date night worked for you both, so that you can either
improve it for next time, or keep doing more of the same if it worked
brilliantly this time.

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

In yesterday’s post we started to look at date night
conversations, covering; some stuff to avoid, what you are trying to achieve
with your date night conversations and some general tips. Today we’ll look at a
series of conversation tips that are divided into the following three sections…

Conversation tips for early on in your conversation.

Tips for the middle of your date night
conversation.

And finally what I call ‘later’ conversation
tips.

The purpose of each set of tips are explained under its
relevant section, but suffice to say the later ones are aimed more at seducing
your partner and getting her mind into the right place. The tips are there to
point you in the right direction for the sorts of questions that you can ask
and also to help you for if your conversation goes a little dead.

Now - there are quite a few tips here, there’s a lot to
remember and obviously you can’t go into your conversations armed with a bit of
paper detailing exactly what you want to ask your partner, so can I suggest
that you take the time and put in the effort to prepare for your conversations.
Yes that’s right, I said “prepare”. Why? Because the one time you don’t want to
have to think about what to say to your partner is when you are suddenly stuck
for something to say. All that I’m suggesting is that by memorising one
question from each of the three sections then you can bring that question out
if at any point you need to kick start your conversation again. When you’ve
used one of them, you can just come back here, learn another and then it’s
ready for a time when you might need it.

Early

Early conversation suggestions – these are ideas to use
early on in your conversation with your partner, ie at the beginning of your
date night. These should at the very least start the conversational ball
rolling…

Hobbies are always a great conversation piece.
You’ll know exactly what your partners hobbies are, so you should be able to
think of some questions about her hobby. Where’s she at with it at the minute?
What’s the next thing that she’s going to do with it? etc. Hobbies that your
partner had as a child is also a good one.

Start up a brand new hobby, and do it together,
taking up gardening or growing your own vegetables, for example, might not
sound that exciting on the face of it, but it will give you loads and loads of
new things to talk about.

Ask your partner for her advice on something,
ask for her support with something, ask for her thoughts on a topic you’ve been
mulling over. This will also have the added benefit of showing her that you
value her. If you’re not comfortable with this idea then hey, you could always
pretend you’re valuing her opinion - but do try and make it believable!

Ask your partner “what shall we do for fun this
weekend?”

Try asking your partner what she is thinking and
what she is feeling (she might have asked you the same question countless
times, so turn the table!)

Try complimenting and appreciating your partner,
for example – you could tell her that she “looks nice in what she is wearing at
the moment”, or “you looked nice when you walked in through the door from
work”. Ask her more about the outfit she’s wearing / she wore to work that day.
Where did she get it from?

If she’s made you a lovely dinner then tell her
it’s delicious and then ask questions about it to show you that you care beyond
the ‘thank you’ and ‘it’s very nice’. For example - ask her what she put into
it to make it so nice. Just show some genuine interest.

If you both share a love of food then that very
subject is a great conversation keeper upper – perhaps you’ve seen a new recipe
that you’d like to try out for example, if so go talk about it with your
partner, get the recipe out to show her.

We talked earlier about you listening out for
‘clues’ in what your partner is saying when she answers you in order to keep
the conversation going. With that in mind then here are a few tips to ask
having been given these ‘clues’ by your partner. So, for example, when your
partner is talking about something you could ask her the following sorts of
questions about the subject…

What about that do you love?

What about that makes you happy?

How do you feel about that?

What do you think about that?

The following are questions you can’t ask too
often, but are also great conversation starters, as they will more than likely
also give you lots of opportunities to ask other questions as a result of your
partners answer…

Ask your partner what the best present that
you've given her is – and when she’s finished tell her what the best present
she’s given you is.

Ask your partner what have been some of the
funniest moments you’ve had together.

Ask your partner what she would you give you if
money were no object, and vice versa, what would you give her if money were no
object.

Ask her who her favourite teacher was and why.

Ask her what her favourite three or four films
are, and then this might lead neatly into discussing a film that you’ve heard
about recently that you’d both like to go and see.

Ask your partner a question about success – that
if she was “guaranteed success” in a venture what would she do? Then listen out
for those vital clues to keep the conversation going in the answers that she
gives you. There should be quite a few clues if your partner gives you good
answers.

Ask her how she likes to relax (and it’s worth
noting that you could learn a lot from the answers that she gives to help you).

Ask her what her perfect day would look like?

Who would play her in a film about her life?

Who would she most like to meet, living or dead?

Ask your partner what she’d most like to be
remembered for? Bit heavy that one though!

Middle

Middle conversation tips. These are ideas to use once you’ve
moved on a bit in your conversation, ie you need to have at least warmed the
conversation up a bit first before you can use these…

Ask your partner what makes her happy?

Ask her what music she likes that she’s heard
recently?

Talk about holidays that you've had together
that have been really enjoyable. Talk about the best and worst holidays that
your partner had as a child or just generally before she met you.

Ask her “where shall we go on holiday this year /
next year?”

Get your partner talking about, thinking about
and remembering all of the good stuff that she’s achieved in her life so far –
this has the added benefit of boosting self-esteem.

You could ask about what your partner would like
to achieve by the time she’s 40, 50, 60, 70, etc.

Talk about what you've done for each other that
made each of you really happy.

Say to her “Remember when... (and then add the
name of the event that you will both remember and enjoy talking about)”.

Tell each other what you appreciate most about
each other.

Tell each other what you admire most about each
other.

Laugh about the past, dream about the future and
generally get inside her mind! Share your dreams that you both have for your
future together. Find out what each others dreams and aspirations for your
future together are. Go imagine a dream future together, where money was no
object. Asking “what we’d do if we won the lottery?” for example, would get
this sort of conversation off to a great start.

Think of three words that describe the best
aspects of your partner's personality and share them with her.

Ask your partner “what do I do that makes you
feel loved?” You should be able to learn a lot from this - so listen well and
make mental notes for yourself about what questions you can ask her next as she
gives you her answer.

Talk about some of the most romantic things
you've done for each other.

Has your love for each other ever made you do
strange things? Talk about what, where, when and why.

If you could give your partner anything in the
world what are four things you would choose to give. And then hope that she
asks you the same back in return!

Late

The tips in this section are ideas to get you both talking
about things that will start to invoke the intense desire that you both had for
each other in the early days of your relationship – re-ignite these feelings
and you are well on your way. Don’t forget though that you can’t just launch
straight into these, you’ve got to have warmed the conversation up properly first…

Talk about when you first met. When did you
realise you were in love? How did you know? How did you tell each other that
you were in love?

Talk about what your first impressions of each
other were. What drew you both to one another? Who asked who out on a date, and
what made you or your partner say yes?

What are the things that you find the most
attractive about each other?

Reminisce about your first date, what you wore,
what you talked about, talk about what first attracted you to each other, was
it the way your partner said a particular thing to you, or was it what she
wore, or the words she used, or the way that she flicked her hair, for example.

Talk about things that happened early on in your
relationship - where you met, talk about how you met, what pub you went to
first, your first kiss (and where you were for it), what did it feel like?

What have been some of the most romantic things
you’ve done for each other?

Dust off the wedding album, grab out your
wedding video, reminisce over the great day that you both had. This is some
seriously powerful rekindling magic right there, sat waiting dustily on your
bookshelf.

And it doesn’t just have to be your wedding
album, grab out any old photo album and you’ve got a whole stack of reminiscing
and conversation starters sat right there.

Ask your partner what makes her feel sexy?

Ask her what music she loves that gets her in
the mood.

If it feels right you could also be going for
some sexual double entendre’s at this point. Do test the water to see what
happens though. If she’s moving towards you conversationally then you could
keep it going, but if she’s moving away from you then do go careful. What you
don’t want to do is to pressure your partner towards the bedroom too soon if
she’s not in the right place.

What are some of the most memorable sexual
moments you’ve had together. Where you first had sex for example! What are some
of the most adventurous places that you've had sex? Talk about a fantasy that
you’ve both got that you’d like to try out, just be careful that you don’t
apply too much pressure in then expecting your partner to carry it out.

Tell your partner that she makes you feel good,
tell her that her body really turns you on, or simply tell her that she turns
you on. But do try to use these types of statements only when it’s appropriate
to do so.

These sorts of conversation ideas are only the tip of the
iceberg. There are loads and loads more possibilities, and all I wanted to do
here was to get you started and to give you a few pointers in the right
direction. Look out for a blog post to come soon with more conversation ideas.

In tomorrow’s post we’ll look at some going out date night
ideas and tips. Thanks for reading..

Using
dinner to communicate with your partner, to have a ‘nice’ close chat and a
catchup.

Using
your conversation to invoke those feelings of when you were first together, so
that you can get those vital infatuation chemicals going again that you both
had whizzing around your bodies when you first met.

Avoiding
those same old conversations about “how was your day dear?”, “how are the
kids?”, “who’s picking Gemima up from ballet on Saturday?”, etc. etc., I’m sure
you get the drift…

Now I’m sorry to put the pressure on you – but dull
conversation is not a good strategy for making your partner feel fuzzy duzzy
lovely romantic thoughts towards you. So instead I’m going to point you in the
right direction of some good ideas for effective conversations ie effective at
reminding your partner about how lucky she is to have married / committed to
staying with such a great conversationalist…

So what are we trying to achieve with these tips? (ie why
should you bother to keep reading?)

Firstly
you are trying to “chat up” your partner.

With
these conversation tips you are also trying to get her in the right place, to turn
her on, to relax her - using words as foreplay.

You
are attempting to undertake some “sexy” conversations…

…and
getting some fun banter going between the two of you.

You
are stopping your conversations becoming mundane and boring (because mundane
and boring isn’t going to have your partner thinking of fun bed based things to
do with you).

You
are rekindling and bringing back earlier happy, loving, memories which should well
help lustful thoughts come back up to the surface in your partner.

Let’s look first at some more general tips for good
conversations…

Try and avoid closed questions if you can,
they’ll only lead to very short ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers. This also makes
conversation sound more like you are interrogating your partner! Aim for
questions that will bring some deeper answers back, these should be the ones
that bring back those important ‘feel good’ emotions.

Instead ask open questions, ones that your
partner can’t answer with a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’.

Just listen to her! Perhaps there’s some stuff
that she wants to get off her chest. If there is then she may just want to talk
the issues out at you, and being a great listener is, believe it or not, also a
great way to be a brilliant conversationalist. So let her talk! Its way easier
to listen than it is to talk anyway, so be grateful for it too!

As your partner talks and answers your questions
look for clues in what she is saying. All you’ve got to do is to listen really
well to her! If, for example, you’ve asked your partner if she’s had a good day
then let her talk the day out, listen carefully as she tells you what’s been
going on in her day and you’ll pickup other things that you can ask questions
about. “Oh I’m fine, it’s been a busy day, I took Johnny to the opticians at
10, and then when to visit my Mum in hospital at 11.30, and then I…” would
obviously then give you the opportunity to ask ‘how her Mum was’ and ‘how
Johnny’s eye test went’. Some of this stuff may be less than riveting for you,
but it will allow you and your partner to continue in conversation without some
horribly passion killing conversational pauses.

If you try and keep the conversation mainly
about your partner then she should, in theory, quite like it. Go for
conversation topics about things that you know that she gets excited about; her
passions and hobbies for example.

With your conversation and your questions aim
for making your partner feel good about herself. ie by complementing her as
much as seems appropriate – but do make sure that you aren't going totally over
the top.

With your conversations you’re expecting (and
hoping) your partner to open up a bit, so give her something back by opening up
a bit yourself as well. For your partners sake avoid giving her one or two word
answers as well please. Opening up about passions that you are excited about
will also change your tone of voice for the better, and will make your partner
excited to be around you and to be listening to you.

Having said that do try not to talk about
yourself too much! It’s very possible that you find yourself very, very interesting!
and your partner will doubtless find you more interesting than most, she
married you after all! But talking mostly about you may get somewhat dull for
her no matter how much she loves and worships you. So if you’re thinking that
you’ve been wittering on about you for far too long then say something like
“sorry, I’ve been talking about me for ages, tell me…” then inserting a
question that you have for your partner, perhaps from what she was talking
about earlier for example.

That’s more than enough to remember and think about for
today, in tomorrow’s post I’ll help you structure your date night conversations
with some early, mid and what I call ‘later’ conversations tips. These should
all help your date night go in exactly the direction that you’re looking for.

Sunday, 7 July 2013

Hello and welcome to week 2 of the posts on date nights.
Today we’ll be covering some date night rules! Why rules? Well, mainly to
ensure that you get the best out of each and every date night, because they
need to be a time for each other and absolutely nothing and no one else. So these
rules are around you both agreeing that it’s okay to tell each other off
(nicely mind) if you break the rules…

Let’s get started….

DATE NIGHT RULES

Date
night needs to be a regular, scheduled thing if your diaries allow it. Ideally
once a week for a really good bit of relationship maintenance, but worst case
once every two weeks.

Discuss
in advance when you can have date night with your partner. If one or both of
your schedules are really hectic or you are away from home a lot, then you need
to be super-organised. Plan your date nights like you would your business
meetings, diarise them early. Sit down with your partner, diaries in hand, one
or two months ahead of time if you have to, and plan the dates in amongst all
the rest of your commitments. Once they are in there make sure that you stick
with them and that heaven and earth are moved to ensure that they happen as
planned.

No
looking at your Blackberries, iPhones, etc., no surfing Facebook or Twitter or
(add name of latest social media craze here) – switch the ruddy devices off and
concentrate on each other for once.

That
goes for normal mobile phones too. Don’t let others disturb the precious time
you have with your partner. Switching the phone off also has the added benefit
of showing your partner that she is more important to you than any other work
or personal phone calls or e-mails.

Be
pleasant and respectful towards your partner throughout date night, and have
good table manners, remember all of the “stop it” and “start it” now’s if you
can.
You are looking to romance your partner on date night, and being pleasant and
respectful are definitely two ‘must do’ ground rules.

Remember
that to do list that’s whirring round and round in your partners head?, well, you’ll need to get used to the fact that you’ve got
to help clear her checklist for date night in order to get the best out of it.
You could ask your partner the night before if there’s anything that you can
help her with or if there’s anything on her list that you can remove for her
and do yourself so that she can relax properly with you.

Try
your best not to discuss topics that will send sexual vibes plummeting
earthwards at hyper speed – avoid topics such as decorating your home or who's
going to pickup the kids after ballet at the weekend like the plague! If you
need some help with this then tomorrows post on conversation tips should assist
you greatly…

Look
into your partners eyes regularly when you are sat across from her (remember
not to do it in a nutter / crazed look in your eyes kind of way - instead look
lovingly into her eyes when you are sat across from her at date night or simply
when you are sat talking and snuggling with her.

Go
careful of drinking too much on date night. Drink moderately, otherwise it will
either make you or your partner fall asleep too early or it could potentially
annoy one or both of you, especially if one of you has gone to a whole load of
effort to put your date night together. Having said that though a drink or two
can help to relax you both, and relaxing is essential for a great date night.

Do
lots of kissing throughout date night, kissing will more than likely be really
important to your partner and it’s one of those key ways to get your partner feelings
nice and close to you. Start your kisses light and cheeky and build up slowly to
the whole full on snogging thing.

Not really rules as such, but…

Don’t wait until the end of date night to start
touching, for example try these…

Give her a light peck on the cheek when you
settle down for date night.

Touch her hands and arms lots during your date (but
do try and do so subtly).

You can lightly graze her legs with yours, then
move slowly and subtly on to playing footsie under the table with her, this has
to be done at the right time and not too early though.

If you’ve chosen foods that you can feed each
other – then do so! Done right this can be very seductive, and yes, that
includes if you are both in a restaurant, who really cares what the other
punters think? You can always use your fork to feed your partner rather than
your hands if you want to tone it down a bit.

The less your partner is expecting big romantic
gestures in your date night preparations the more likely she is to enjoy them.
So go for a little secrecy until the last minute!

When you are sat down with your partner having a
drink, connecting, at dinner - clink your glasses together and propose a toast,
say something intimate when you are clinking glasses together. Use it as an
opportunity to get across a nice, loving connection (through the use of sweet,
romantic words [yes I said sweet]) between you both. Use words that will make
your partner feel good. Need some help with the sort of words that you’d use?

“I feel very lucky to be with you”

“I love you very much”

“You make me very happy”

“I never dreamed I'd ever meet anyone as lovely
as you”

“I don’t want to be with anyone else, ever”

This next idea you’d have to do subtly if you wanted
to try it - but it might at least help to get your thought patterns into the
right place for date night; treat your partner as if you were on a first date
with her, as if she were a new woman in your life. This might return those
first date nerves and fears, but should get you in the right place trying to
impress her. Both of you could be in on it to give it a try. You never know, it
might actually turn out to be quite good fun!

Whilst you’re at the supermarket picking up for
the food for your date night think about the next morning as well; you could
serve her breakfast in bed with a themed twist; a French breakfast for example,
with croissant, Pain Au Chocolat, Une Café Aux Lait and all served with a
French kiss! This would also work if you were having date night that evening,
ie start her day off with a little luxury and continue it when you get home at
night as well.

Without fishing for compliments from your
partner make sure that she knows that you’ve gone out of your way to romance
and relax her on date night. Your partner should be able to clearly see this
through your preparations, rather than you telling her point blank that “I’ve
gone out of my way for you”! What your partner will see as the seductive bit is
that you’ve put the effort in and that you’ve been thinking about her before
you’ve even got home. And if you’ve put the effort in there, then she’ll put
some effort in elsewhere…

That’s quite enough rules! and also the end of today’s post.
Tomorrow we’ll take a look at some conversation tips to really help your date
night flow beautifully.

How to prepare your partner well for date night,
making sure that she’s in a really great, relaxed place.

How to make sure that you are well prepared and
looking and smelling great for a brilliant date night.

In today’s post we’ll look at some ideas for a great date
night in…

Ideas for date night:

The most obvious date night in idea is of course
the very traditional dinner with your partner sat at your kitchen or dining
room table. There’s nothing wrong with this whatsoever, it’s a great place
where you and your partner can relax together without her worrying about what
she’s wearing or who’s looking at her or what the waiter thinks of you both or
how much it’s going to cost you both, ie it can just be the two of you to
concentrate on.

Having had dinner watch a romantic film
together, do try and make it one that she’ll actually enjoy and want to watch
though! Perhaps rent the first film you ever watched together, it’ll bring back
those first date nerves and passions. Give imdb.com a go for ratings and
reviews, and perhaps check in with her first to see if she approves of your
choice. I’m sure you don’t need telling that the wrong film will more than
likely be a total passion killer.

Have a cinema night in; turn your sofa into the
back row of the cinema, make a load of popcorn (not so much that she'll feel
really bloated afterwards having snaffled the lot though!), buy or rent a
romantic, sexy film to snuggle up to together. See our post on “Erotic media” for
some really film ideas.

Have a bath together (give your partner the
non-tap end!); take strawberries, olives, etc. and of course some sparkly drink
stuff, etc. to the bathroom with you, setup loads of candles and whack in the
nice smelly bath bubbles. There are some great ideas for nibbly foods and
drinks in Tuesday and Wednesdays posts.

Have dinner and then go and snuggle in bed
together, or have a nibbly picky dinner in bed together. It’s warm there,
she’ll relax and you’ll be in exactly the right place for later on. Just make
sure you both eat lightly, otherwise she could feel so totally put off the idea
of anything more having completely and utterly stuffed your faces! Once you’ve
eaten go have a read of some erotic fiction together. This will help get your
partner in the mood and will invoke those chemicals that you first had flying
around your bods at the infatuation stage of your relationship. See our post on
“erotic media” for some ideas.

None of that floating your boat? Okay then…
think about the different places around your house that you could use to have
your date, you don’t have to sit at your dining room table or slouch out in
front of the TV in your lounge, instead surprise her with one of these ideas,
they’ll increase the sexiness and excitement of doing something together that
you don’t normally do…

If you’ve got a garden then you’ve got the
perfect date location, it’s almost like going out! Grab some candles (the
garden ones will probably be best, or storm lanterns if it’s that bit windier),
lay out a rug and feed each other yummy nibbly foods and sparkling wine or
champagne. A splendid seduction technique! See Tuesday and Wednesdays posts for
some tips on food and drink.

If you haven’t got a garden then perhaps you
possess a balcony? If so what a splendid, and really different place to use for
your date. Don’t just grab the rug and the candles, grab a load of cushions as
well, lie out, cuddle in and enjoy the view whilst idly chatting the night
away. Just try not to set light to your cushions, bit of a passion killer that
one.

Your lounge floor could be another possibility?
You’ll need those rugs and those cushions again, and, if you’re lucky enough to
have an open fire or a log burner then place the rug in front of it, light it
up and go for it. The heat and the dancing flames will do wonders for the whole
romantic ambience thing.

And finally - let’s end on an idea which starts
with a ‘don’t’… It would be somewhat advisable to switch off the TV for
anything other than that lovely romantic film, or if you absolutely must watch
TV then watch something that’ll make you both laugh and relax. Normal, dull,
everyday TV can be a real passion killer with its adverts every 5 minutes, and
the constant arguments on reality TV or the depressing reality of the news!
Instead; sitting down on your sofa, snuggling up and chatting with the TV
switched to the ‘off’ position is best for helping you both connect with each
other through words and some of that lovely staring deeply into each others
eyes stuff.

That’s it for today, in tomorrow’s post we’ll be covering
off some date night rules! Sorry, yes, rules. Why? Well, mainly to ensure that
you get the best out of each and every date night, because date night needs to
be a time for each other and absolutely nothing and nobody else. More tomorrow.

First, how to prepare your partner (bear with it and read
on, this sounds odder than it actually is!)

Your partner

Yes, you need to prepare your partner well for date night!
Try the following to get her into the right place for a really great evening
together …

Run her a bath and make sure that she spends the
time luxuriating in it whilst you prepare dinner for you both.

Have a glass of something alcoholic; perhaps
wine, champagne or sparkling wine waiting for her on the side of the bath.

If you’ve got children at home still then whilst
she’s in the bath make sure that they know that its “mummy” time and that she
is not to be disturbed.

Remember that bubbles in the bath and candles
round the edge of it will go down really well for showing her that you’ve made
every single possible bit of effort for her to relax and enjoy her quiet time.

Try a bath bomb or perhaps rose petals sprinkled
into the water to get her senses going early on in the evening.

If you’ve got time during your dinner
preparation perhaps you could…

Offer to wash her feet whilst she’s in the bath.
If she’s okay with you touching her feet and isn’t totally ticklish there then
she’ll more than likely find it exquisitely relaxing and intensely luxurious.

Sit with her and catch up whilst she’s luxuriating
in the bath.

Or offer to wash her hair or her back.

When she gets out of the bath, and again if
you’ve got the time during your dinner preparation, you could offer to dry her
and / or rub moisturiser in afterwards.

And of course do make sure that you’ve done
everything that you can to ensure that your partner can be as relaxed as
possible during date night by doing the stuff under the ‘House’ topic in
Mondays post.

You

And of course we can’t leave you out of it either I’m afraid,
you need to prepare well in order to impress your partner still…

Whether you are going out or staying in your
partner needs to see that you’ve made some sort of effort for date night, ditch
the baggy, holey jeans or scruffy paint splattered overalls in favour of
something smarter – even if it’s just a decent pair of jeans that fit you well
and a t-shirt. It doesn’t have to be much, just show her that you made an
effort to tart yourself up a bit for date night - be visually pleasing to her
and make sure that she’s reminded why she bothered with dating (and, if
applicable! marrying) you in the first place!

Be clean, don’t be Mr. Stinky – have a shave,
have a wash if you need to, apply your nice, new, decent deodorant – and review
our posts on ‘self-improvement’ if you need more reminders.

Clean your teeth, don’t have stinky breath for
date night.

Apply the nice, new cologne you purchased in
order to smell yummy for your partner.

That’s it for today, and it’s the final post of the week
tomorrow, so to round off we’ll look at some brilliant little date night ideas.