Thursday, April 9, 2009

Thinking

This past Sunday I heard something I hadn't connected from my brain to my heart before--You can't get to Easter without passing through Good Friday.

I know.

It's early in the morning to be thinking.

But I am.

You can't get to Easter without going through Good Friday.

I didn't hear that last Sunday, I heard it during the week from someone on a mailing list I'm on.

You can't get to Easter without going through Good Friday.

It's exactly the kind of phrase I love, the kind of thing that sits in my brain.

There's a fabulous hymn, written many moons ago, called "O Love, that wilt not let me go." that sums up just how these things work out. I'd never thought of it in the same way until this moment.

(Indulge me!)

O Love That Will Not Let Me Go Words: George Matheson Music: Christopher Miner 1. O Love that will not let me go, I rest my weary soul in thee; I give thee back the life I owe, That in thine ocean depths its flow May richer, fuller be.

2. O light that followest all my way, I yeild my flickering torch to thee; My heart restores its borrowed ray, That in thy sunshine's blaze its day May brighter, fairer be.

3. O Joy that seekest me through pain, I cannot close my heart to thee; I trace the rainbow through the rain, And feel the promise is not vain, That morn shall tearless be.

4. O Cross that liftest up my head, I dare not ask to fly from thee; I lay in dust life's glory dead, And from the ground there blossoms red Life that shall endless be.

It also has one of the most beautiful congregational hymn tunes I have ever had the privilege to sing. Nad it says the same thing as the original quote - until you've gone through the bad stuff you can't get to the good bit.

For me, that gives me hope that no matter how bad things get, there is a joy to come. That no matter how much it hurts, there is hope.

I am living that joy to come now though! I went through that bad stuff with He-Ex, he went through the bad stuff with She-Ex, and now we are living the good bit. There's not a lot of money about, work is a bit of a stress at times, and the Ex's remind us on a regular basis why they are Ex's, but this is the good bit.

There are more good bits to come. More of the pain that we have both been through will be erradicated, replaced good bits.

Just so you know.....

I'm from England - so some of the words I use are different to some of the American words. If you're stuck or confused, just leave a comment and ask!

A little translation -

AC - my Adorable Child, boy, age 12.J - my wonderful fiancé, who has hugged my broken heart back into one piece, and loves the AC who loves him back.

T-boy - J's son, age 14.

Rich - my then fiancé who was killed in July '09BG - Beautiful Girl, Rich's daughter and my stepdaughter, who never saw her father again after her mother chose to take her away to the States at 3 years old in '05.She-Ex - BG's mother. R's ex.He-Ex - the ACs father. My ex.

Frank, Errol and Kevin are cats.

Anyone else I'll add as I come across them, or leave me a comment and I'll explain!