Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Renunciation, Sex, & Power

(written during Lent, 2013)

One of the glaring contradictions within peace advocacy and activism –
and one that makes my own sweeping thesis that war is formative of
masculinity constructed as domination problematic – is that so many men
who are emblematic of peacemaking, or opposition to war, have displayed
in word and deed their own inattention to and apparent denial of the
power that men hold over women in the arena of sexual relations.

It
seems that Gandhi, even and especially after taking his vows of
chastity, slept naked with and bathed with a number of young women, as a
kind of “testing” of his will – one that would occasionally result in
“involuntary discharges.” Some were even the wives of his male
disciples, who he had directed not to have sex with their wives as part
of their pursuit of higher knowledge.

Dr. Martin Luther King, the
great Christian leader of the non-violent struggle against legal
apartheid in the American south, did not preach the “formal” chastity of
Gandhi as spiritual quest; he stepped out on his wife – that is, he
committed adultery with women he encountered while he was on the road.
He even told Ebony magazine that a man’s infidelity was indicative of
some fault in his wife – he gave “nagging” as one example.

Karl
Barth – while not explicitly a pacifist – is counted among the
theologians whose work largely supports Christian non-violence; and he
appears to have been involved in a 35-year affair with his secretary.
His most direct claim about gender and power was that women are
“ontologically subordinate” to men. Especially, one must conclude, a
man’s secretary – who in this case was never credited with her
substantial contribution to his own work – and, of course, his wife.

John
Howard Yoder, whose Christology is canonical for many Christian
pacifists, sexually assaulted or abused dozens of women during his
tenure as a professor at Goshen Biblical Seminary and Mennonite Biblical
Seminary, which he justified as non-sexual because the incidents did
not involve penile-vaginal intercourse. In some ways, his wheedling of
several victims involved a rationale similar to Gandhi’s – that he was
taking relations between men and women to some higher plane.

There
is a tendency among people who admire these figures for some of the
things they did – and they were important things – to write this off as instances of human fallibility.

And I am saying “write them off,” because I believe this is an
intentional form of dismissal. The fact that these are all men and the
fact that these are cases involving sex makes them similar, it makes
them more specific than merely “fallibility,” and it suggests that
something important about these similarities is being missed, or evaded.

We
know that all forms of domination are not directly violent. We know
about hegemony, for example, as Gramsci describes it. We know the
economic domination can be exercised structurally, without direct
violence, for example, when we submit to employers on unpleasant jobs
out of fear of want. These forms of domination are structural. They are
built into the existing self-organization of particular societies in
particular ways, imbricated in networks of existing kinds of social
relations.

What is curious about this pattern of men who oppose
the kind of domination that is associated with war, and often as not the
kind of structural domination that is associated with work (economic
exploitation in workplaces), is that these same men seem so reluctant to
recognize the ways in which women in male-dominated society are left
with fewer reasonable choices in the face of structural male power.
Another failure or recognition is that women are placed in a kind of
milieu of scarcity by patriarchal power that leads them to see other
women as antagonists – as competition, for men as sexual partners or
husbands, yes, but also for the approval of men who are in control of
workplaces, governments, even social movements. Men are not in the
right position to judge when and how women make their accommodations,
but we oughtn't be free to ignore the power that creates this
circumstance.

This failure of recognition underwrites men’s
ability to rationalize the ways in which they can take advantage of
their own structural power as men, vis-à-vis women. Male power has been
so continuous and all-inclusive that it is self-naturalizing. It appears
ontological, even when it is clearly cultural. For me, as a male, that
is a very comfortable and comforting ontology.

One of the things
Catherine MacKinnon wrote, in her critique of the same problem with male
Marxists who participated in the social upheavals of the 60s and 70s, actually sums the issue up very well.

Sexuality is to feminism what work is to marxism: that which is most one’s own, yet most taken away.

Note
that she did not say that people oughtn’t work or engage in sex. She
said that power in either relation alienates the person from her work or
her sexuality. I refer here to the phenomenon of disembodiment (again)
that results from a body that can be alienated, the body as a material possession.

We
seldom talk about alienation, because the term has taken on a more
therapeutic than social meaning in modern discourse – alienation is a
medical symptom of some inability to adjust, not as a state of being
within social relations characterized as domination.

I ran across a
radio program a few years ago that is actually very illuminating,
especially for men. It was aired in 1999. This edition was called
"Lockup." It was about prison. The third act was called, "Who's your
Daddy?" It was a reading from ex-con Stephen Donaldson's pamphlet
telling new convicts how to survive in prison by protective sexual
pairing. The description of this segment was:

"Who's
Your Daddy? A reading of a pamphlet written by ex-con Stephen Donaldson
for heterosexual men who are about to enter prison, about how to 'hook
up' with a stronger man -- a 'daddy' or 'jocker' -- who'll provide
protection in return for sex. He explains the rules and mores that
govern this part of American prison culture. There's no graphic language
and there are no graphic images in this story, but it does acknowledge
the existence of sexual acts. Read by Larry DiStasi."

It
was a matter-of-fact, step-by-step instruction booklet on how to shop
for a strong man, and how to manage the relationship with him. Go to Act
Three, which is about 32 minutes in. It only takes six minutes.Link to Program

There was a very vigorous discussion of this piece at Metafilter. I also recommend this.

One comment: "memo to myself: don't go to prison"

Another
comment: "Disturbing article. I'm not into constantly losing fights
only to get raped at the end. And no way would I catch for someone. I
would either become a jocker, or stay in solitary. Unbelievable -- what a
different world."

More: "Oh. My. God. It's one thing to joke
about 'Federal Pound-Me-In-The-Ass Prison,' but this article's
matter-of-fact presentation exposes the horror. Can't prison authorities
do something about this? Like maybe investigate and prosecute all
rapes?"

And this: "Wow. The section at the end on Adaptation was
really interesting. It must be completely world-altering to start out a
jail-sentence straight and then slowly have your identity punk'd.
Reading stuff like this reminds me of the kind of horrific practices
that happened in previous centuries of human history and in animal
tribes. Not much has changed, in some ways."

Finally: (This one
caused some to get angry) "Ah yes, there's nothing to get red-blooded
men fired up about rape than a good ol' drop-the-soap-story. By the way,
it happens to a woman about once every 2 minutes, according to the
DOJ."

When I heard this on the, I said to myself, "This is it.
This is how difference is constructed as hierarchy... which is what
women's oppression is, a system of oppressive social power... and when
there is no "difference," difference is constructed (you get to be the
"wife," the punk) to construct hierarchy. This is where we can show men
what it is like to be women... how rape as a constant reality (one more
regulated than really prohibited) in the background serves to push all
women into the perennial sexual-contract: protection in exchange for
obedience."

I note in the metafilter discussion how the men try to
find anything to make this different than what happens to women...
women are not locked up by the state... rape doesn't generally happen
"in the ass"... and on and on and on. The avoidance is visceral,
desperate. I can't be a "catcher"! We have to stop PRISON rape... oh
yeah, and all other rape, too. [as an afterthought]

This is a perfect metaphor for women's condition, and for the so-called instant of "consent," because it is not metaphorical... it is real, and it is happening to men, and that makes it an urgent issue all of a sudden.

How
do we now parlay that outrage into an understanding that this is what
feminism is about... the same urgency to end the system of sexual
subjugation of all women. I'm not talking about simply equal pay, but
about the subjugation of women as women by men as men. That is why rape
and battering and the renting of Indian women's wombs as surrogate
mothers and international sex-trafficking and the explosion of
misogynistic internet pornography are important issues. They don't
happen to women because women are the same as men. They happen to women
because they are women.

And if we want to get to the root of
homophobia, then we have to understand that the behavioral expectations
that underwrite it are based fundamentally on women's subordination. The
policing of what Adrienne Rich called "compulsory heterosexuality" is
the enforcement of a sexual binary that is defined by domination and
subordination.

What does it tell us that men's most terrified
reaction to the idea of prison is the fear that women experience all the
time? What does it tell us that the worst punishment is to be made like
a woman? "I would either become a jocker, or stay in solitary."

This
is particularly poignant to me, because some loved ones recently lost a
young man (also a loved one to me) to suicide because he was about to
be returned to prison – where he was abused, and where solitary
confinement was his only protection.

I am not saying that all
women’s choices are as urgent as facing rape (though men can never know
how this possibility haunts the thoughts of women, except perhaps when
men face prison); but that power and comparative powerlessness (the lack
of desirable choices) makes the world of women and the world of men
different. Very different. Blaming women for making accommodating
choices is a refusal to recognize this crucial difference.

The
refusal of Christian men – especially Christian men committed to
non-violence, to opposing domination – to recognize this difference, and
to act accordingly, is a spectacular form of hypocrisy.

The
question might arise, what can men do? And I don’t have any
comprehensive answer to that. But I know a few things men ought to quit
doing. The first is to quit assuming that women think about sex the way
we do; and to never, ever, ever, ever make even the slightest sexual
overture to any woman – including our wives – without a clear indication
that it is welcome. More abstinence would not hurt most of us. We
cannot and should not consider sex to be an entitlement. It is not. Full
stop. And we are responsible for what we do, men.

Women will figure out what they need to do, as they have been for quite some time, without the direction coming from us.

There
is no way to anticipate every encounter between men and women or to
construct pat answers for how to respond in a way that is consistent
with our faith. What we can do – as men – is recognize the structural
power we have inherited, and in every way possible, to renounce it. This
might be our daily struggle. Something to think about during Lent.

Kolkata escorts really showed your creative way hugely and drawn the possibility of your online per clients. The substance genuinely detonated my cerebrum and I discovered uniqueness in your made work style. Paralyzed to see your shaped work constrain and took in a basic measure from you.

Hi,Dear my self preety and i am an enterprenuer.I drive my business in lucknow as a lucknow escorts.My clients are happy with my lucknow escorts serice.I drive lucknow escorts not in lucknow but also available in as an Allahabad escorts,patna escorts,chandigarh escorts and jaipur escorts.I have 3years experiance in lucknow escorts.so that we can say that lucknow escorts service is best service provider in lucknow.

Coll now 09450428614 gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now 09450428614 gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now 09450428614 gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now full details gigolo coll boy play boy services all India ki all city's may services available full secret service providers full maza masti key saath pasaa kamye coll now 09450428614

Offer a very precise beauty to guys who've no troubles with time however who have hassle finding girls he desires to make love. As i've been searching out a Doha Escort, which permits men who need to spend one night time with tremendous pride, without having any issues, i'm able to integrate my presence with you and come up with get entry to to the high-quality possibilities you want. The fine factor this is crucial for this sex experience is that you'll continually have a unbroken and lasting that desires to revel in a amazing and whole love revel in than ever earlier than. as quickly as you have got were given arrived, you may have a persevering with intercourse enjoy at my home or on the surrender of my live, and there may be no obstacles in taking pics happiness in mattress. you can seek the indian escorts in doha from the cellular Smartphone whenever you want; you may virtually damage this trouble thru calling me. you can say hiya to a night that you may continuously leave happy as we're capable of have beautiful times.

Ms Aashi Rana and setup a sexy date with one of our beautiful Goa escorts now. Search some of our glamour girls here and then just give us a call to set up. Escorts in Goa – Goa Escorts Service – Goa Independent Escorts - Goa Call Girls and Goa Escort.

Dear friends My name is Archana kumari and I'm one of the most trusted escort service provider since many past years. If you are seeking a fabulous call girl as a female escort during your visit to any city or abroad and your wife or girl friend is not with you, Then follow me on the links to hire a seductive girl for bed pleasure during night.

Hi!! My dazzling Friends,My name is Eillen Sharma.I Provide Hot call young ladies for sentiment and appreciate over entire night with step home convey for each area. I likewise give Sexy Modal stars and Housewife like your better half to sentiment on the bed of entire night with no hazard folks. On the off chance that you are fascinating for romance with hot young lady you can contact me anyplace.

It is easy to confuse a girl companion with a prostitute, in fact the boundary between the two is not entirely clear. There are company girls who offer, in addition to the Beirut Escorts service, sexual services to their clients, and prostitutes who can offer their services as well as companions. In any case, when we refer to the company girl service, it is indicated that she acts as a companion at dinners, events and public events or even trips in exchange for an economic remuneration.

The call girls are discreet professionals who offer services as paid sex men, and even women. These ladies in general are educated and educated in addition to knowing how to adapt to any type of event or event. Other synonyms of this term are Beirut Escort or company girls. According to the requests of each client, the young lady can accompany the client to an event, a dinner or even a social event. There are many men who decide to hire this company service to impress or enjoy a beautiful and impressive woman without complicating stable relationships.

It is easy to confuse a girl companion with a prostitute, in fact the boundary between the two is not entirely clear. There are company girls who offer, in addition to the Beirut Escorts service, sexual services to their clients, and prostitutes who can offer their services as well as companions. In any case, when we refer to the company girl service, it is indicated that she acts as a companion at dinners, events and public events or even trips in exchange for an economic remuneration.

The call girls are discreet professionals who offer services as paid sex men, and even women. These ladies in general are educated and educated in addition to knowing how to adapt to any type of event or event. Other synonyms of this term are Beirut Escort or company girls. According to the requests of each client, the young lady can accompany the client to an event, a dinner or even a social event. There are many men who decide to hire this company service to impress or enjoy a beautiful and impressive woman without complicating stable relationships.

It is easy to confuse a girl companion with a prostitute, in fact the boundary between the two is not entirely clear. There are company girls who offer, in addition to the Beirut Escorts service, sexual services to their clients, and prostitutes who can offer their services as well as companions. In any case, when we refer to the company girl service, it is indicated that she acts as a companion at dinners, events and public events or even trips in exchange for an economic remuneration.

The call girls are discreet professionals who offer services as paid sex men, and even women. These ladies in general are educated and educated in addition to knowing how to adapt to any type of event or event. Other synonyms of this term are Beirut Escort or company girls. According to the requests of each client, the young lady can accompany the client to an event, a dinner or even a social event. There are many men who decide to hire this company service to impress or enjoy a beautiful and impressive woman without complicating stable relationships.

It is easy to confuse a girl companion with a prostitute, in fact the boundary between the two is not entirely clear. There are company girls who offer, in addition to the Beirut Escorts service, sexual services to their clients, and prostitutes who can offer their services as well as companions. In any case, when we refer to the company girl service, it is indicated that she acts as a companion at dinners, events and public events or even trips in exchange for an economic remuneration.

The call girls are discreet professionals who offer services as paid sex men, and even women. These ladies in general are educated and educated in addition to knowing how to adapt to any type of event or event. Other synonyms of this term are Beirut Escort or company girls. According to the requests of each client, the young lady can accompany the client to an event, a dinner or even a social event. There are many men who decide to hire this company service to impress or enjoy a beautiful and impressive woman without complicating stable relationships.

We've won the best modest teenagers and, moreover, mates, so you can have the best time with them when you're ready to offer them the best time. The Islamabad Call Girls are the best decision without uncertainties, since you can choose them to have fun in the most perverse way. They will be young and can influence you to feel young, compared to any doubt, they all ended up too well, in addition to the possibility of choosing stocks in Islamabad or in case you decide too. In most cases, there is no doubt; This is the best decision, since we are simply looking for a way to choose animated women. So, the MOST IMPORTANT PERSONALS of Islamabad escorts are the best to choose from anywhere.

Mumbai escorts services call girls agency number - 9892955829All Mumbai Our dependably assure that the Our escorts blessings in Model Escorts in Mumbai you request will hotels deal with your problems and that the escort younger women will arrive dates and places hastily.Http://www.allindiacallgirls.Com/ All our escorts model and air hostess do their work willfully and make the maximum in their Job. Our younger girls are attempted for sexually transmitted sicknesses at ordinary durations and Never waver to contact our Coordinator of escorts Rani priya mumbai.Com and reveal to us your desires for the services and what your goals of the escorts are models serices within the mumbai pleasant business enterprise. They can engage in sexual relations with various positions and stances. Our Mumbai Escorts Services are the Provide any type of call girls like: independent, Hotsexy, VIP, High-class Models, High-profile Girls, Beautiful, Hot, Best, etc.We provides Cheap rate for Our female escort service in Mumbai.Young ladies additionally now to improve the situation players and give additional energy according to young men needs. Our group knows how to give brilliant administration to clients around Mumbai territory. They give benefit every single matured man from any area.visit http://www.allindiacallgirls.comre you interested in Independent Escorts in Mumbai and want to have some fun with huge assets? You have to the best place. Now it is our duty to provide you the hottest cheeks in Mumbai. We are working with prettiest and naughtiest Mumbai Independent Escorts who are 24*7 ready to make you excited. These independent escorts are highly dedicated to their jobs and make their entire efforts in making the clients fully satisfied. If you want to get a bulk of pleasure and adventure then you got to book an independent escort. These independent escorts are not an average looking girl because we understand our clients taste and we respect your choice. These are so hot that can make you filled with full of lust when you watch their physique. They have incredible assets and can make you crazy for grabbing them. Just give these escorts a chance to serve you and we are assured you are going to contact them again and again, You can choose the best Mumbai Escort Service according to your need and that fits into your budget. we have plenteous of escorts to make our clients fully satisfied and you can choose among hundreds of call girls who you think is the best for you. Mumbai escorts are the heaven on earth and you can feel when you come to grab these escorts. We are here to serve you like a king because we provide a customer-oriented service and our escorts ensure their clients are 100% satisfied before leaving their clients bed.Best Escorts Service All India,Mumbai Escort Models,VIPS Escorts Service Girls,VIP Call Girls Escort Service,Mumbai Call Girls service,Sexy mumbai Girls Service,High Profiles Call Girls in Mumbai,Hot sexy Call Girls AhmedabadBest Mumbai Escort Service,Mumbail Vip Call Girls,Mumbail All Call Girls for Night,mumbai crazy call girls numberWe are provide you VIP female call girls with very cheap rate in all over India. You can call me any time in day or night. I am available for you 24X7. http://www.taniyapatel.com/mumbai-call-girls-escort-service/http://www.taniyapatel.com/mumbai-call-girls-escort-service/http://www.taniyapatel.com/cheap-rate-call-girls-mumbai/

Kolkata which is known as city of satisfaction Is the most seasoned and recorded significance city of India. Kolkata Is such a place where anyone can consume their time on earth as per their decision. Their necessities and decision are not quite the same as each other. Like that each pick distinctive approach to have and appreciate as indicated by their decision and necessity. In Kolkata, You will get everything the methods for pleasure like bars, bar, Hotels, eatery, night life and some more. You will likewise discover parts escorts kolkata escorts. They are not dependable organization for you. On the off chance that you pick their administrations, It might be opportunity to cause harm in light of the fact that might be the injured individual as duped individual. The general population of Kolkata are nice and clever. Along these lines, how you can be inept picking such an extortion office. Pick astutely and use our administration with full satisfaction with best most magnificence young ladies on the grounds that our office is quickest developing Kolkata Escorts specialist organization Running since fifteen Years. In the event that you are experiencing your depression, prepare to profit the enticed night with prominent hot Russian young ladies Kolkata Independent Escort.

Our administrations are pills of prescription for those individuals who are experiencing its forlornness In the City of Kolkata. It's an ideal opportunity to state bye of your dejection and time to get boundless fun and satisfaction as indicated by your decision with shaking magnificence benefit given by our kolkata Models Girls. Nobody can beat our office in Kolkata Because diverse sort of young ladies benefit accessible like air entertainer, high schooler young ladies, school young ladies, demonstrate young ladies and a lot more as they are constantly prepared to serve you better administration with polite way at just barely one call. In the event that there is loads of dissatisfaction in your life, don't accuse your life as you are carrying on with your life. Simply come once at our Kolkata Escorts organization, we move you that we will wiped out your everything dissatisfaction. Our trustable office is open for with everything taken into account over Kolkata and rest of Kolkata.

BAISHAKHI

Kolkata Escort Service

Holy messenger young lady's sitting tight for you prepared to satisfy you lively requests and sensualize your nerves to contact you sexual dimension.

Our Independent and Russian Escort services are targeted to elite people who are frequently abroad for business and looking for Russian Escort models to spend a pleasurable time with memorable and enthralling experience. Dating at our Independent Escort services we only work High Profile Escorts in Delhi,Mumbai and Chandigarh who are well educated, travelled extensively and fluent in several foreign languages.Delhi Escorts