I Ain’t Dead

Dude. Where they hell are you? Word has it that you were attacked and eaten by wild baboons while on a quest to find dank cocoa beans in West Africa. I guess if I don’t hear back from you in a few days, I’ll assume that’s true and I’ll just spread the rumor on the Internet. Hope you didn’t get your sack ripped open by apes.

Best,

concerned4u”

Hi concerned4u,

No, I’m not dead. While I did suffer a broken rib while in Africa, the real reason I’ve been MIA is because (as HamDog said), Mrs. PlanetoftheCrepes and I had our second kiddo and I’ve been vacationing at home for two weeks (cleaning up poop and spit-up, painting the garage, weeding the driveway, changing my oil… you know, vacationy kind of stuff).

HamDog and I are brainstorming ways to make the site more interesting instead of doing a bunch of long drawn out essays. That kind of shit doesn’t pan out with the unwordy types. We’ll probably have lulls for a bit, but don’t worry… Snort Ramen will soon pack a bigger punch that may or may not make a black hole or two. Stay tuned, Snorters.

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You've reached "The best junk food review website on the Internet". Junk food reviews, stoner concoctions, and vintage snacks. Saddle up and ride, we’re hittin’ the junk food game hard. We’re tapping the veins for sodas and doing lines of ramen. If you don’t think you can hang with some of these concoctions and reviews, you’re gonna get left in the pixie dust. Eat a burrito and listen to Slayer.