‘Game of Thrones’ Recap: ‘The Mountain and the Viper’

“That was worse than Ned Stark,” my wife screamed as tonight’s “Game of Thrones” episode – an aptly titled “The Mountain and the Viper” – cut to black, the Red Viper’s head now splattered on the stone floor of King’s Landing’s arena. It was a bloody conclusion worthy of a Nicolas Winding Refn film. The showdown was a stunner, though, leaving Jen chanting, “Yes! Yes, say her name!” over and over as Prince Oberyn cut into the weak breaks in Gregor Clegane’s black armor. Having read through “A Storm of Swords” I knew what was coming: Yet another one of George R.R. Martin’s rug pulls, reminding us that we really shouldn’t have much hope that anything will work out for anyone in this show. Even knowing the outcome, I don’t think my heart has beaten this fast since Ned Stark was marched before the rabble all those years ago.

“I just wanted [the Mountain] to say her name,” Jen sighed, despondently forking her chicken salad. In an episode full of instances where women must acquiesce to men in order to survive, the belated vengeance for the murdered Elia Martell wouldn’t have compensated for it all, but it would have felt good. So, we got the escalating chant of Prince Oberyn on behalf of his sister – “…you raped her. You murdered her. You killed her children” – colored by Tywin and Cersei’s squirms, Jaime’s admiring gawk, and Tyrion’s widening, hopeful eyes. But, not unlike Tyrion’s cousin’s beetles, sometimes things get smashed.

I just now read that line about the beetles to my wife, who responded: “Like women in this show. All the time. Women are the beetles.” From Gilly in Mole’s Town, to Danaerys on her throne in Meereen, to Arya in the Vale, women are abandoned by men, betrayed by men, or just left adrift in the world. Upon discovering that her aunt was, in fact, dead and that, no, there would be no ransom for her after all, Arya let out a wonderful laugh (officially my favorite moment of the season). She laughed at the Hound and his silly hopes, and laughed at herself for how truly, utterly wretched her situation has become. At that point, why not?

As for the rest of Westeros, it’s not looking good. Theon/Reek managed to rouse his sanity in order to help Ramsay Bolton capture Moat Cailin. Had this been any other show – where, you know, things go well – Theon/Reek would have rekindled his courage and reclaimed his name and, with his fellow Ironborn, stuck it to Ramsay. But this is “Game of Thrones,” so everyone got flayed and Theon/Reek returned to his station. But, for capturing the fort, Ramsay was finally accepted by his father, and joined Roose Bolton, Lord of the North, on a cold and windy ride to Winterfell.

Way, way up north, Ygritte and the Thenns slaughtered the denizens of Mole’s Town but, proving that she is not a total butcher, Ygritte spared Gilly and her infant. But up at Castle Black, Sam presumes her killed. The Night’s Watch stays put, however. There will be no revenge for their murdered brothers and the women of the town. Mance Rayder is riding south and they have to stay put.

In the Vale, Sansa shows how much she learned from Cersei, Margaery, Varys the Spider, and all the whisperers and plotters of King’s Landing. She chooses to lie for Peter Baelish rather than see him executed for her aunt’s murder. Her logic is simple: She needs to survive and, while Littlefinger can’t be trusted, she at least knows what he desires: Her. She plays her part perfectly, ensures his freedom and, at least for now, her own skin. When last we see her she has emerged transformed, adorned with avian epaulets to match the mockingbird of the House Baelish.

Across the Narrow Sea, while not contending with Grey Worm’s growing attraction to her assistant, Missandei, Danaerys must grapple with the betrayal of her oldest, closest friend. In the beginning, Jorah Mormont worked for Robert Baratheon to spy on the Targaryan children. He long ago converted to the cause, but a small child slipped Ser Barristan Selmy a copy of Jorah’s pardon from the late King Robert, evidence of his earlier treachery. As unpleasant as it was to see the Red Viper get his eyes gouged out, when only moments earlier he seemed thiiiiiiis close to getting the Mountain to submit, it was satisfying to witness the chilling finality of Mormont’s expulsion. Danaerys spoke with a scythe, bloodlessly slicing him out of her presence, leaving him to wander the wilderness, powerless and alone.

It would have been cool, though, if Arya had popped out from behind a rock to laugh at him too.

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