Who says you can’t keep enjoying life in the midst of difficult challenges? Regardless of the catastrophe, when life hands you the proverbial lemon don’t settle for lemonade. Grab yourself some tequila, salt and a blender – then savor your lemon margarita with a smile on your face.

Immovable Foobs

Yesterday I took the dogs out for some exercise and I was trying to encourage them to run. I decided I was going to run around and let them chase me. So I start running and I notice that my foobs are not moving. Not at all. Not even a tiny bit. No bounce. No nothin’. I wasn’t wearing a bra either, mind you. That’s how stiff these stupid expanders are.

The expanders don’t hurt anymore, not really, but they are awkward and uncomfortable. I am ever-conscious that they are there. It feels like I’m wearing something. Well I guess I am wearing something, but it’s weird when you’re wearing it inside your body. And the fact that they are so rock solid feels rather bizarre. Instead of moving when I move they are at attention constantly, and when I do certain movements they actually get in the way. Seriously!

This picture has no real significance other than it’s an uncooked potato and it’s funny.

This is temporary. I know that. The reason the expanders are so hard is because they are there to stretch my tissues. They are pumped up to the point where they are pushing against everything, making my tissues taut. They aren’t there to simulate real boobs; they are there to make room for implants that will simulate real boobs. So in the mean time, I guess I’ll be walking around with boobs shaped like half-coconuts and as firm as an uncooked potato.