Extract the archive, right click in the folder, run command window here

In the console, run this command: abd devices

If you’re still like me, you’ll see a message about the daemon not running and then starting successfully.

Close the command window

From there, repeat the initial steps, and all should be sweet. Except when you realise the issue you’d wanted to debug appears to have been fixed in an unrelated task and is no longer an issue and you’ve spent half a day swearing at a stack of mobile devices for nothing.

Note: The ADB driver may not be required - I’d installed it before grabbing the platform tools, but hey, up-to-date drivers can’t hurt.