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PTSD TW:rant and suicide

So i got fucking diagnosed with PTSD today. like what the fuck. I'm so upset. I'm literally shaking and i'm so irrationally angry at the doctor and i feel like this shouldn't be happening. One more mental health diagnosis to add to my growing list. awesome. I'm so embarrassed that I actually told a doctor what's going on; i never want to show my face outside again. i want to crawl in a hole and die. I shouldn't even be upset about this; i am no different today than i was yesterday before my diagnosis. but i feel like this isn't real, i can't have ptsd, that's for like soldiers or whatever. i know actually it's not, there are many causes of ptsd, but not for me, i can't have it. they walked me through the diagnostic criteria today and i definitely fit with all the symptoms, but i still don't want it.

i know my brain is not functioning normally right now and i may regret this post; i'm sorry if i've offended anyone. but i need to say it somewhere; i have no one to talk to and i cannot deal with this. i want to die

Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .
-- C. S. Lewis

I can really relate to you and please no appologies necessary! You're post is definitely not offensive in any sort of way at least to me
I was diagnosed with PTSD last year and also had a hard time wrapping y head around it but the more I've learned the more I see that it's pretty common (especially in people with a history of trauma). I know 'society' thinks it's a soldier illness but most psychiatrists know it's related to some sort of abuse. If you have had any abuse (sorry if this is a sore subject) have you been able to come to terms with it? Thats what helped me with accepting that I have PTSD. To admit that I was abused in different ways. Or even if a stressful life event occured (such as a loss of a loved one) one can develope PTSD.

I guess I just want you to know that you aren't alone. And remember, a disgnosis doesn't not define who you are as a person. It's just what the medical community does to assign a 'label'. Remember...it's just a diagnosis and doesn't define you as a person.

thank you for your response i appreciate hearing that i'm not alone, even if it's from someone on the other side of the internet. i think i'm making this into a bigger deal than it needs to be and just freaking out a little. i've been researching ptsd almost constantly since yesterday, and i recognize most of the symptoms in myself. but thinking about it so much has made the symptoms so much worse; like i feel like i'm barely functioning right. having a doctor give me that label was the opposite of helpful. and i know that going to therapy for the next little while will be no picnic, because she'll want me to talk about stuff that i've put so much energy into trying to forget and i know it's important to do that for recovery but i just think it will put me over the edge. I hate that i'm letting this affect me so much.

Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .
-- C. S. Lewis

So i got fucking diagnosed with PTSD today. like what the fuck. I'm so upset. I'm literally shaking and i'm so irrationally angry at the doctor and i feel like this shouldn't be happening. One more mental health diagnosis to add to my growing list. awesome. I'm so embarrassed that I actually told a doctor what's going on; i never want to show my face outside again. i want to crawl in a hole and die. I shouldn't even be upset about this; i am no different today than i was yesterday before my diagnosis. but i feel like this isn't real, i can't have ptsd, that's for like soldiers or whatever. i know actually it's not, there are many causes of ptsd, but not for me, i can't have it. they walked me through the diagnostic criteria today and i definitely fit with all the symptoms, but i still don't want it.

i know my brain is not functioning normally right now and i may regret this post; i'm sorry if i've offended anyone. but i need to say it somewhere; i have no one to talk to and i cannot deal with this. i want to die

your diagnoses do not make you who you are, your illnesses do not define you. ♥

The above replies are exactly right. Diagnosis aren't meant to marginalize people but are meant to provide a point of reference for medical and mental health professionals to communicate and offer particular treatment. Think of it as an eye colour. Your eye colour doesn't define who you are nor restrict what you can wear but can serve as a reference to others as to which colour of clothing suits you best. That's the best analogy I could come up with haha.

Anyway, don't get down about a diagnosis or think that your struggle is secondary to a soldier or something. Trauma can happen to anybody at anytime and the effect it has on you only makes you human.

Okay, so: A new diagnosis does not mean new symptoms. It means a name for symptoms that you already had. Symptoms you have already been dealing with. All a new diagnosis means is new help.
I know it still suuuucks. I hate watching the diagnoses pile up. It makes me feel like a crazy person. But a crazy person who's getting help at least.

thank you for your responses; i'm doing a little better now. It's definitely true that this is just a name for symptoms that I've already had for a while now. Maybe it's a good thing because now that I know what to call it maybe there's a clearer way to treat it. I do feel like a crazy person, but getting help is worth it, i guess. i can't keep going like this.

Friendship is born at that moment when one man says to another: What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .
-- C. S. Lewis