Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

It is believed he was hoisted on to the horse and galloped up the street, shouting "yee haa".

He had an accomplice.

He ran out of gas. He had a flat tire. He didn't have enough money for cab fare. His tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole his car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN'T HIS FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD.