A three week trip to New Zealand that turned out to be 1 ½ years! Around the age of 22 or 23, my friend and I decided we wanted to visit New Zealand for a few weeks, so we hitch hiked from Vancouver down to Los Angeles to catch a flight. After a short time there, we went out separate ways, and I ended up traveling, hitch hiking and living all over New Zealand and Australia! (SheNOW says: I bet there are some juicy stories here!)

Could you have easily gone on such a trip while married?

No, not as easily. It’s hard to tell a spouse that you are up and leaving on a trip for an undetermined amount of time to have adventures of your own and see the world.

What age did you marry?

37. I met him when I was 30 or 31, and we lived together for seven years before we tied the knot.

Why 37?

When I was a teen and in my twenties, I never imagined myself married or having kids.

What, if any, fears and pressures did you face and overcome as a woman in your twenties?

Then, and to this day, women have to constantly overcome stereotypes, sexism, and antiquated views of what it means to be a woman from men, women, and even our families.

I’ve always been independent, eccentric, and different, which made me strong. When you are the unconventional and the unexpected, it makes life a bit more challenging. Those challenges, however, give you the strength to withstand any hurricane of hardships that come your way.

We are brought up to believe women are supposed to be a certain way, and when we go against that, it takes that learned stamina and backbone to make decisions that are in OUR best interest despite what society thinks is right.

In our twenties, we struggle to overcome that. It’s as if we are brand new fawns, born unto this world. Our legs are wobbly, and we are learning more and more who we are. When you get to 50…now, that is when you truly step into your power.

What do you think women miss out on by getting married too young?

Remember the Fawn analogy from earlier? If they don’t have the chance to build up their strength, there is a great chance of them remaining wobbly. It’ll take longer for them to develop their muscles to run freely and truly walk on their own.

The span before marriage can also teach them the importance of spending time on themselves, and they realize, “I am a person.” Just because I have a family doesn’t mean I have to relinquish me. It is an easier foundation for future balance in life.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of waiting longer to get married?

Women fall in love and think, “Whoa, this is it.” But, what people need to realize is that you can fall in love more then once! Look at Prince William and Kate. They dated, took time apart, got back together, etc. Young people need to sloooow things down.

Advantages:
– If you wait longer, you have all the chances in life…IF you take them.
– You get over your wobbly bit, and you develop the muscles to stand on your own.
– You experience a greater diversity of….everything.
– You become more fully fledged.
– You’re more mature.
– You have the chance to experience more relationships

Disadvantage:

– It delays having children.

Any last thoughts?

All women, the young in particular, have so much potential for greatness. And, they have the responsibility to carry on the work that has been done by their grandmothers, great grandmothers, and great-great grandmothers to empower women. The fight is not nearly over. They shouldn’t take for granted what has been done for them. Keep making changes for your daughters and sons and to make a better world for everyone.