“Can you do my hair like this,” really is the classic client request! It’s one of those heartfelt, emotional pleas that goes something like this, “I want my hair to look totally natural, like Jennifer Aniston’s,” and there it is, that name, ‘Jennifer Aniston’, probably my most requested hairstyle! Over the years there have been many others, Jane Fonda, Joanna ‘Purdy’ Lumly and Farrah Fawcett have got to be up there with the most requested, as have Mary Quant’s French Bob and Mia Farrow’s urchin style cut.

My first ‘can you do my hair like this’ request, was in 1974 when I worked for Ricci Burns, for a Mia Farrow, who played Daisy Buchanan in The Great Gatsby. My saddest was in 1978, when a gaunt, mousy looking woman brandished a cut-out of Farrah Fawcett-Majors and said, “My husband wants me to look like this.”

Most hairdressers love pictures of celebrity hairstyles, they’re great conversation starters. I love them. However, all photographs need interpreting and putting into context: who’s the person. why was the photograph taken. what are they selling. is it their normal, everyday hair. has the image been altered, enhanced? And when I’m presented with a celebrity’s picture, my aim is to translate it into a style for my client.

Over the last ten years, or so, we’ve seen the rise of social media, which has had a profound impact on television, mainstream journalism, the celebrities themselves, and of course the general public. The image of the self (the selfie) – user-generated photos – take on a new meaning and importance – everyone and anyone can suddenly become a celebrity!

I find myself questioning celebrity culture; I wonder why so many celebrities feel they have the qualifications to tell us how to live our lives and what to think? Is it because they have transcended their own selfishness and become ‘global’ brands? (They’ve disappeared up their own arses and come out the other side, like a gurner in a horse collar.) Or is it because we all love a liberal nonconformist, an anti-establishment provocateur, a court jester on a short leash?

I feel that there’s a dichotomy between how celebrities like: Lily Allen, Russell Brand, Charlotte Church, Bob Geldof, Eddie Izzard (to name the bloody obvious, but there are many more), live their lives and how they expect us to (and how we are able to) live ours.

Boris Johnson and Sirs at The Spectator, that really was such a massive stitch-up, or to quote the man himself, who recently criticised David Cameron by saying, “This is a bigger stitch-up than the Bayeux Tapestry.” However, let’s be realistic, I’m sure the choice was ‘semi-political’, and anyway, I wouldn’t want to be ‘named’ and summoned to the court of the Turkish Sultan Erdogan, like poor old Jan Böhmermann and be given a turkey slap.

Anyway, I thought I’d write kindly riposte (Recep Tayyip Erdoğan the President of Turkey is unable to do this because his time is being taken up designing and building a new petting zoo in Ankara. Oh, and he has absolutely no sense of humour):

Boris Johnson

The glamorous politician Bo Johnson,
Like a Minoan he can leap over oxen,
However, his rhyme was a crime,
And he should do some time,
That glamorous politician Bo Johnson.

I wrote about five limericks for the competition, two of which I sent in to The Spectator. They’re far too rude for my website folks. Send me a Twitter message, and I’ll send them to you :-) xXx

What I love about Marilyn is that she has been so many different shades of blonde – Golden, Ash, Champagne, Honey, Bleached, Strawberry, Platinum and White Blonde – you’ve got to love that in a person. This image: Marilyn Monroe by Bert Stern (the last sitting, June 1962) is a White Blond (Bleach + 6% / 20 vol peroxide + toner).

Thinking of going blonde this Summer? Thought I’d point out the different versions for you :) There are three main categories: warm (red spectrum), cool(blue/green spectrum) and neutral!

Varieties of Blonde:

Flaxen Blonde: the original neutral, natural blonde. Very light but not white blonde.

Yellow Blonde: obviously a blonde with a yellow hue – slightly gold maybe, hopefully! At its very best a Champagne Blonde.

Platinum Blonde, White Blonde: often extremely light, a whitish looking blonde; almost all natural platinum blondes (tow-headed) are children. Technically, a platinum blonde is blueish and therefore a cold blonde. It is sometimes called a Silver Blonde.

Strawberry Blonde, Venetian Blonde or Honey Blonde: think of red then add it to what you think of as blonde! It’s a reddish blonde.

Dirty Blonde, Dishwater Blonde, Grey Blonde, Mouse: a natural dark blonde that is the perfect background for highlights. Naturally includes flecks of golden blonde and brown, but is often flat and dull, and quite frankly, mousey.

Ash-Blonde: technically ash means green! However, green counteracts and neutralizes red. A cold and very natural looking blonde. It can come out as a smoky steel blonde.

Bleached Blonde, Peroxide Blonde: an artificial, yellowish blonde that is trying to be a platinum blonde, but it’s not. The base blonde of a ‘bleach and toner.’

Dark blonde: when natural, it looks a shade of light brown in the Winter and lightens in the Summer. If your natural colour was brown, but is now grey; go dark blonde. Yet another classic blonde for highlights.