Rock, Paper, Shotgun has uncovered information that suggests sleazy Half-Life star Gordon Freeman did have an affair with Alyx after all. And the cold-hearted scoundrel then broke up with her on her birthday night, at a party attended by her closest friends and family. Friends of Alyx have explained to RPS that the poor girl was devastated, as the bearded so-called “hero” walked out on her without saying a word. She is said to be recovering with her best friend Barney. We’ve contacted Freeman for comment, but so far the heart-breaker has had nothing to say.

I demand that Episode 3 looks to drop Freeman altogether; instead focusing on poor Barney’s clearly desperate struggle out of the bleak abyss that is Alyx’s ‘Friend Zone’. Also, more Combine and stuff.

GORDON CAN DO WHAT HE WANTS TO DO, HE SAVED ME AND 12 OF MY FRIENDS FROM THE COMBINE AT THE TRAIN STATION SO AS FAR AS I’M CONCERNED HE’S A PRETTY SWELL DUDE, KIND OF WISH THE REST OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS HADN’T DIED IN CITY 17 BUT WHATEVER.