Blog Post

If you are a Dom, there is a sub looking to obey you. The issue you may be running into is part of being a sub is a feeling of being out of control. This can cause your sub to act out and be kind of wild. It does not mean your sub does not want to obey, it just means you need to be doing a better job as the Master. It is your responsibility to keep your sub in line, so it is time for you to start stepping up to the plate.

To make sure your sub is being given all the direction needed, you need to pay attention to the actions. The kind of problems you may encounter is a sub who is acting out, being defiant or will not leave your side. These are easy to fix as long as you are willing to be patient and work with your sub to overcome the current state of affairs.

Acting Out

“Have a healthy BDSM relationship”

If your sub is acting out in strange ways, it is because there is a feeling you are not being controlling enough. This is a way to test the boundaries of what can be gotten away with. It is your responsibility to see this behavior for what it is and lay out the ground rules for what you expect as the Master. You do not need to be harsh or deal out any punishment at this time. Only if your sub cannot follow your rule should there be any call for punishment.

Being Defiant

When your sub is defiant, it is a plea for attention. The best way to calm this kind of behavior is to first subject your sub to isolation. Blindfold your sub and use restraints and a gag to make your sub feel completely cut off from the world. This should be done for a period of no more than one hour. You are not looking to torture your sub, but trying to teach a lesson. When the lesson is over, you should sit your sub down and explain why they were punished. Let your sub know you still care and will be more attentive to needs. Follow through with paying more attention to your sub to make sure you do not have to deal with these problems again.

Your sub Is Attached at the Hip

Another problem you may have is when your sub is too clingy. It is one thing to have a healthy relationship where your sub needs you, but quite another thing when your sub depends on you for everything. Make sure you educate your sub on what your role is and how boundaries are being overstepped when nothing can be done alone. Communication is normally enough to correct this problem.

Making sure your sub is obeying you at all times is the best way to make the Dom/sub relationship work. Pay attention to the problems and correct them as soon as you see them emerge and you will have a lot more fun.