Saturday, 31 December 2016

Goodbye 2016

I feel like this year started off so well, I couldn't of asked for more.

There were lots of pictures I could of chosen to share but these are the ones that stand out for me.

After 6 months of build up and getting so excited we finally became home owners in March. The thought of this still puts a huge smile on my face.

A week later all of my family got together to celebrate my Grandmother's 80th birthday. It was such a special weekend as its the first time we had all been together in years and my Grandma was so happy.

In June Isabelle turned four, FOUR! The years are flying by. We had a party at home which was of course mermaid themed and it was also a chance for everyone to come over and see the new house.

July brought a visit to my old school as it was sadly shutting down and I wanted to take the opportunity to visit again. It was so strange taking the kids there and showing them my old class rooms but I'm so glad I did.

Come August and everything started to go wrong. I handed in my notice at work and actually ended up leaving before it was up. The job was making me ill to the point were I was diagnosed with depression. It was definitely the right decision but it obviously came with consequences.

The beginning of September brought Charlie's second birthday and it had to be Thomas themed. His birthday was exactly what we needed and we had so much fun celebrating. It also brought Isabelle starting school. Three months later and she has come on so far in such a short space of time and we are beyond proud of her.

Halloween came and went and before we knew it we were planning Christmas. Phill had taken on more hours at work and for now I was a stay at home mum. I very much realise this is not ideal and it lives with me everyday. The guilt is overwhelming and I have found it so difficult to find a job that would fit in with the children as childcare is so difficult for us.

Since August lots of little things would go wrong making us feel like we had some kind of hex over us. I'm aware that everyone goes through tough times but when it's constant and it feels like nothing will ever change its hard to keep going on. The children have been our saviour and we have kept pushing forwards for them.

On Christmas Day we had an ambulance out to Phill again (he previously had one out in August for the same reason) as he had severe pain in his side. As I type this he is waiting for an urgent scan appointment to come through and I just cant think about it too much as he is my whole world. We will get to the bottom of whats going on though and we will get him sorted.

I really don't want to end this post on a negative note so I should write down what I want from 2017. I want just the basics, to be happy, healthy and to live in the positive moments more and try not to dwell on the negative so much. All though that is very much easier said than done. I want to push forwards with this blog and my youtube channel as they make me so happy.