A recent video notebook entry from “Don’t call me a cougar” Katie Couric talks about the plight of successful single women, and calls the current jobs situation in our country a reason for a “mancession” – A few of the highlights of her “mancession notebook video” entry that appeared on cbs news:

I understand that she lives in a world of affluent people, and is perhaps friends with only well educated and relatively well-off women, so her video notes to them about marrying a guy for the right reasons, and not to marry up the financial ladder because of the current economic situation make sense, but much about this kind of bothers me.

women vs men on payrolls 1970to2008

First off let me say I agree, everyone should be finding someone to date or marry based upon integrity, character and similar values. The way she makes it sound though, if you are not a man with a good job, then you are not considered an “eligible bachelor” – well, what about those three things you said we should be looking for? None of those have anything to do with earning 6 figures. Also saying that having the men-with-jobs ratio to men-without-jobs in their favor, gives them license to behave badly, well I do not agree. Sure there will be people who remain employed taking advantage of the financial plight, perhaps taking on multiple girlfriends or wives or mistresses, but it is the women in those relationships that give men the license to behave badly, not the employed men.

Maybe more men will behave better?

Man kisses Katie "Don't call me a cougar" Couris' feet

For the first time in history we have more women on the payroll in the United States, then men, perhaps that will make some men act better. Perhaps there will be more men working harder to taking care of their female partner in order to keep a roof over their own head and food in the belly?

I see several things coming with this mancession situation

There will be a lot of exposure as to what’s real in people’s relationships, when jobs are lost, and the chips are down, often that’s when people’s real feelings will come out. If you can make it with your partner when you are completely broke – then you have a real love relationship. If your partner goes looking for someone else with money, then at least you know where their priorities are and you can stop wasting your time with them.

Surely there will be women who go looking for and competing with men who have jobs and money, this will lead to more women willing to put up with situations that they may not if the economy was better.

Man with sugar baby threesome

There will be more women dating older men, there will be more women willing to share a man with other women. There will be more women turning to stripping, and prostituting. Places like sugar daddy dot com will be flooded with girls who are going to compete for the money of the smaller pool of men who have it. Prices for sex will go down, girls will accept smaller gifts. More women will stay in bad relationships because their current one offers some semblance of security, and the options out in the dating pool are more meager. None of this will be true of all women, perhaps only some, but certainly it is happening.

There will be more cheating. With so many people having little or no money, people will certainly cheat more often. Men are women who would of left their partner for another may stay with their husband / wife / boyfriend / girlfriend simply for the financial security. With more men and women having less jobs and money, the options for breaking off the current relationship to pursue another with financial security will be smaller. This may lead to more cheating, but less breaking off the current official relationship. If there were more jobs out then, then the options to move on would be greater. We may also see people cheating in order to gain some financial security, sugar daddy relationships (and some cougar relationships) are often part time, and about money, and many of them are entered into with the knowledge that the “sugar baby” or “cub” have other relationships.

Will more women choose lesbian relationships with a lack of financially stable men in the dating pool? Will more women marry other women for the benefits that they can not get with available men?

Men with good jobs, men with money and no job will be able to take advantage of the situation as well, Katie Couric says that men will get the license to behave badly, but really like I said earlier in this post, it’s the women who will give the license. Men with money will have the option for taking care of multiple partners, and will probably have women being nicer to them, just for having money or a job. There are good sides and bad sides to this.

The good thing is that taking care of multiple women makes you feel good sometimes, and it’s good

Man with three wives and kids - big love

for the economy, and the kids of those women if they are milfs single moms and need financial support. With fewer financially secure single men options for women, they are more likely to appreciate the smaller things in life, like food, and cheaper gifts. You are also more likely to keep a woman that you already have, as the younger, good looking guys who may have stirred up carnal feelings in your gal are likely to be more muted by the lack of funding they have access to.

Palyamorous relationships can be fun and fulfilling for all involved as well. Bu polygamist relationships should be about love and not a necessity because of the American job market.

The bad side of this includes the fact that women may stick with you and resent it. I think that resentment is the number one killer of relationships. They could be watching tv everyday and wanting to have those nicer things in life that are constantly advertised, and may resent you for not providing everything they want, whether it’s more money, or more time, or a younger more virile body. When the economy turns around, you may find yourself without a mate, and that could hurt. There is many more things that could, and probably will happen, including girls watching those crime shows on tv and getting the idea to off someone with money somehow so they can get the financial security and then get what they really want in a relationship.

I know all this is extreme, but it is real. Perhaps it won’t be anywhere near this extreme for everyone, but I also think that many people in the media are not truly aware of what relationships and life are like in many of today’s suburban towns. Places like Ohio and Michigan, where unemployment is so broad, must have a very different dating, mating and family situations then places like wall street.

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It sucks that we are in this predicament, I am not a big fan. I prefer people to make their relationship choices based upon love and desire, not about financial well being, or food, or feeding children. But this is reality, not reality tv which is pretty fake, this is the real life situation for many in our society today. It reminds me of how many people have been dating and dealing with a mancession in Russia for many years.

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I am hoping that it is not true for all of Russia, but from what I have read, many men are so broke that they can’t take care of themselves, or women, or kids that come. This is one reason that you find so many Russian brides ready to export to the USA. With the world economy collapsing, I wonder where we will be exporting brides from the US to? Will we have dozens of matchmaking services where people in Suadi Arabia pay 10,000 to import an American bride, with hundreds of thousands of desperate women signing up for such services?

I agree with Katie when she says “marriage (and dating) should be an unlimited partnership, not a leveraged buyout”

However I do believe that men, women and society have put certain expectations with money and relationships. In some cases it is truly a matter of survival, people who stay with a partner to feed themselves and or their kids. On another end of the spectrum, I think a majority of us believe that someone with plenty of money and resources is entitled to taking on multiple wives (or cub boyfriends) if they so choose. With the current mancession, we may see plenty of roles reversed, and we may see new sides of large portions of our society. I hope the economy changes soon.

This post is not finished – I need to come back and edit – please forgive my dark tone and any mis-communications.

Very interesting thoughts about the current dating situation in the current economy. I wonder if the jobs trend will continue and we wil see more women dating multiple men as well. I imagine there will be more men that could become dependant upon women just to eat. We could see more sugar mommas who can keep several men under their thumb with the curent and possible future economic woes.
I too had heard about the mating situation in Russia making it hard for women to find employed men to date abd mate with. Of course there it is just as hard for women to find work. Here in the U.S. it seems that more women have access to jobs and money, which does make it a very diferent situation. Strange times we are living in, that’s for sure!