The Anxious Student

Rabbi Ishmael ben
Yossi was once in the market of Jerusalem when he saw one of his
students walking behind him. Rabbi Ishmael noticed that the student
appeared to be frightened and anxious.

“You must be a sinner,” he remarked. “As it says, ‘The
sinners in Zion are afraid’ (Isaiah 33:14).”

“But does not Scripture also praise fear?” countered the student.
“As it says, ‘Fortunate
is the person who is always afraid’ (Proverbs 28:14).”

Rabbi Ishmael rejected the student’s argument. “No, that
verse refers to Torah.” Regarding Torah study,
it is proper to be vigilant, lest we forget what we have learned.
This concern ensures that we constantly review our studies.

Why should fear and apprehension be a sign of sin? Why are such feelings only
appropriate with regard to Torah study?

Trust in God

When teaching about the trait of bitachon, placing one’s
trust in God, the Sages quoted Psalm 112. This chapter
describes the righteous individual as one with an unwavering faith
in God, one whose life is unburdened by fears and worries:

“מִשְּׁמוּעָה רָעָה לֹא יִירָא;
נָכוֹן לִבּוֹ, בָּטֻחַ בַּ-ה'.”

“He will not fear evil tidings; his heart is steadfast in
trusting God.” (Psalms 112:7)

The Sages explained the first part of the verse — “he will
not fear evil tidings” — in two ways. Lack of fear is
an expression of genuine trust in God. Additionally, it is a
reward for one’s righteousness.

The famed scholar Hillel lived his life according to this teaching. Once, when
returning home from a journey, he heard troubling sounds of uproar
coming from the town. Hillel remarked, “I am confident that it
is not in my house” (Berakhot 60a).

What is the source of this attitude of confidence and equanimity?

Bitachon is based on the realization
that even that which appears to be troublesome should not unduly worry
us. We recognize that all events in this world are Divinely
ordained. If one’s heart is genuinely “steadfast in trusting
God,” there is no place for fear and anxiety.
Everything is ultimately from God; in the larger scheme,
nothing is absolute, unredeemable evil.

The most debilitating aspects of suffering are
not physical but psychological. When a person
can see the world as it is, yet remain full
of trust in God, even his hardships are not true
afflictions. Such a person is content with his portion,
and is able to face life’s challenges with composure and grace.

But for those who are resentful and embittered,
troubles await at every corner. One
cannot be composed and content
without learning to flow with life and accept its ever-changing vicissitudes.

Fear and Sin

What is the connection between fear and sin?

Fear is the result of a state when the soul is at odds
with the outside world. We do not fear that which
is normal and expected. One who is unburdened with sins and
maintains a healthy connection with society will not
suffer from excessive worries and fears.

Those whose lives are beset with conflict and unethical conduct,
on the other hand, have strayed from the proper path and
lost their standing in society. Due their estranged lifestyle, such
individuals suffer from anxiety and apprehension.

Furthermore, those living an ethical life are following the
moral dictates of the intellect; while those who abandon the
path of reason are subject to the whims of the imagination
and its fears.

Never Enough Torah

Why did Rabbi Ishmael teach that there is one sphere of life where
anxiety is appropriate — regarding Torah study? Why should we be
afraid of losing our Torah knowledge?

There is no reason to fear that we might lose something that
we deserve, as long as we act appropriately. But when
aspiring to acquire qualities that are beyond our natural
level — such as the Torah, which transcends the
ordinary human level — there is room for concern. Even
those who live their lives with integrity, following the
dictates of the intellect
without suffering from imagined fears, may
be concerned lest they lose this extraordinary
gift.

Unlike other fears, however, this concern need not disturb
our equilibrium. There is an obvious method to
neutralize it: dedicated effort to study and
review.

Only with regard to Torah study is dissatisfaction a
positive trait. This feeling motivates us to work towards
greater spiritual perfection — a goal that can never be
attained, since there is no end to spiritual growth. As long
as we recognize that this sense of discontentment is meant
to prevent stagnation and stimulate further
growth, this concern will not discourage our spirits.
Rather, it helps us overcome any lazy tendencies,
ensuring that we are not satisfied with spiritual
attainments already acquired. With this awareness, our
spirits are filled with joy and resolve, as we
continue to grow and succeed in our spiritual endeavors.