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Saturday, January 24, 2009

I cry probably more than anyone I know. I feel my life is falling apart. I don't know where I'm going or where I've been. I guess you could say I don't know who I am anymore. I used to... at least I thought I did.

I'm tired of the constant pain in my hand and arm. I went in to get a cortizone shot to help my postpone surgery until school was over. Now I have withdrawn from school because of the needle hitting the Median Nerve in my left hand damaging the nerve. The simplest things hurt. These are the things I've found I can't do without burning pain: tie my shoes, wash or brush my hair, open bottles, zip up my coat, push myself up, and hooking my bra in the back is damn near impossible.

I want my life back. I want to feel loved.

I don't know who to turn to. Whether I should turn to God, a shrink, my Mom, who????