Saturday, January 15, 2011

Rock, Chalk, Ubel Sucks Cock

Cam Newtwon is too smooth, creepy and fake in an OJ Simpson kind of way....The future NFL flop is likely an accessory to his dad's extortion attempts and likely a laptop thief. But the NCAA is cool with that, as long as dead-broke no-name athletes don't accept a ride across campus in a snowstorm.

Testing the Big 10's new division names? What exactly are the criteria for testing names? The public has already said they suck, does this not count until the public says they suck during the season?

Husker Uber-Nerd Brandon Ubel is confident the Huskers will win in Lawrence Saturday. PYB is an admitted Jayhawk hater and knows they're perennially overrated, but Ubel might want to make an impact in ONE Big 12 game before predicting a win at Allen Field House. Actually, he might want to go just one Big 12 game without thoroughly embarrassing himself and reminding Cornhusker fans that he likely would have trouble cracking the starting lineup at Nebraska-Omaha.

Vegas oddsmakers aren't nearly as confident as Ubel, installing KU as a 16-point favorite. We know the Jayhawks hate covering the point spread, or actually can't do it because they're never good as their name. But they love pouring it on at home against overmatched teams....it takes some of the sting out of their annual second-round NCAA Tournament meltdown.

If NU is to prevent a bottle blasting they will need to: actually guard the three-point shot, shoot better than 25% from the three-point line, make free throws, establish some sort of post presence on both ends of the floor. Paging Mr. Diaz....paging Mr. Diaz.....

At least NU fans can blame any big loss Saturday to the dismissal of Kamyron Brown. Sounds like he hated going to class. Well, back to the west coast, Kamyron, to flounder around doing nothing while telling your boys you played D-I and got screwed by the coaches. The guys at the local gym should love hearing that story for the next 30 years.

If you see something creeping at a snail's pace in Big Sky country in upcoming months, it's either a glacier on one of the mountains or now former Husker RB Dontrayveous Robinson running on the football field. Robinson was introduced at Montana State this week, and said his transfer to Bobcat nation was due to NU's offensive style. Translation: he sucked and is too slow to even dream of playing for a D-I team. Good luck, though.