Oh! Someone you adore is getting married!?! And you want to do throw the best bachelorette party ever? I can help.

I have been doing sex ed classes for bachelorette parties for more than a decade. I have been to more bachelorette parties than I can even count. Each one is different because it is centered on a unique group of friends and their bride-to-be. Here are some tips that I hope will make your job a little easier.

1. Decide who is the event planner and who’s there to help.

Usually it’s the maid of honor, all the bride’s maids, a family member or sometimes the bride herself. The leader can then delegate to those who are ready to help. Pass the responsibility of food, drink or other elements someone, and make the affair fun and easier for everyone involved. The leader should then follow up with everyone along the way to ensure things are coming together as planned.

2. Create the guest list.

Have your bride gather up her favorite people. Does she want a big party or just her closest friends? Have her think back through various times of her life like childhood, high school, college, past jobs, social groups and family. Ask her to really think about who she will be comfortable being herself around. If it’s someone from work who may be offended seeing her after a few drinks or a family member she has not seen in years, she may want to think twice about inviting them. And if she has a guest who does not live locally, it can be fun to tell her they can’t make it and then coordinate their arrival as a surprise!

3. Pick Your Date

Some brides will have the party a month or two before the wedding, other wait until a day or two before the wedding. But keep in mind that schedules fill up fast so as soon as you know the bachelorette party date, send out “save the date” notices. Use email, evite, or paper invites via mail. Sending save the date notes and invitations via social media or text is a sure way to have them go unnoticed or forgotten. If you are having trouble coordinating a date, punchbowl has a really “date decider” feature that can help guests chime in and narrow it down.

4. Please the Bride

It can be impossible to please everyone so focus on pleasing the bride. Use her wants as a guide and then do a twist on her ideas. Does she like to dance or sing karaoke? Or is she more of a quiet, spa day sort? Does she want a whole weekend affair or just an evening event? What are her favorite foods? If she says she hates the idea of male strippers, don’t get her a stripper. Put her wants first. It can also be so fun to keep the details of the event a secret from the bride, but let her guide your plans but don’t let her know exactly what you have planned.

5. Plan Loosely

The party should be fun and stress free. Plan the big stuff, but don’t feel like you have to plan minute by minute or pack the evening with events. Leave some wiggle room for late arrivals, snacks, catching up, lounging around and getting from place to place.

6. Define Your Budget

Usually the lead party planner will decide how the party will go, define the cost and let each party guest know how much they need to contribute. Or sometimes one person will cover some or all the costs. If everyone is chipping in, you can do a poll and ask each guest what they can reasonably afford and use this as your guide. If one person is insisting upon doing something that is beyond the budget, it is appropriate to ask that person to help cover the costs for those who cannot afford it. And be sure to factor in the cost of the bride, as she should not have to pay for anything that evening. Again, you may have a hard time pleasing everyone but letting them know the costs ahead of time is a fair thing to do.

You can have them send money in advance or bring cash the night of the event. This is easier than trying to split the bar tab or restaurant check at the end of the night.

7. Location

Limiting the locations will be more cost effective and make logistics much easier. People often start the party with finger foods and drinks at one person’s home or in a hotel room. Then they will go to a restaurant or club later in the evening. If there are lots of people traveling in from other cities, it can be nice to have the party happen at the hotel where everyone is staying. One person will rent a suite and that will be the home base for the party. You can then use the hotel bar, pool or spa as destination points.

8. Drinks & Food

The possibilities here are endless. Is there a chef in the group who wants to cook? Finger food all night long? A pot luck? The bride’s favorite restaurant? It all depends upon how big your budget is and how little or much work you want to put in to preparation. The very best experiences seem to happen when the food is prepared in advance or catered so that no one person is stuck in the kitchen for the whole affair.

Drinks are a similar thing. Make it easy on yourself. Everyone brings a bottle of wine or champagne. Have a signature mixed drink that you can mix in advance and pour over ice. Also, if the party is going to last for hours, consider mixing drinks on the lighter side. You want to have drinks at the affair but you also want to make sure everyone is safe and happy the day after as well. Have bottles of water and nonalcoholic drinks available for anyone who may need them.

It’s hard to find really amazing sexy cakes. I think the best ones I have seen are usually homemade. They are so cute, lopsided and loaded with love! If you have a baker in your group of friends, check out this penis cake pan, these cup cake pans, and these penis cookie cutters. Write something cute and dirty like “The best is yet to cum!” on the cake.

10. A New Experience

Learning something new together gives the group a chance to bond and something to remember. This is usually where I come in. I do super fun sex ed classes.

I bring the sexy factor to a party, giving the bride (and everyone at the party) new skills that she can use on her honeymoon, bedroom, kitchen floor, etc…! What I do is fun and as mild or wild as the group who invites me. I bring props, diagrams, real information and laughs. Plus the cost of the workshop includes a goodie bag full of sexy items for your guest of honor presented by me on behalf of all the people at the party. Other new experiences might include wine tasting, a cooking class or some other activity that excites your bride.

Here’s what people have said about me:

“I just wanted to let you know that the wedding was a few weeks ago, and every two minutes someone was making a crack about ‘that night.’ Everyone had such a good time, and I have a feeling no one is going to be forgetting that little session any time soon! Thanks again, and I am sure I will call you again when my friends start getting married!!”

“We all had such a wonderful time. You did a great job, and I had the most amazing romp with my hubby the next day (like all day!) …hehehe. Thanks for all. I am holding onto your contact info for future reference…”

“You were absolutely a blast, and we all learned soooo much! We all couldn’t stop talking about how great you were all night long.”

11. Transportation

If you have multiple locations for the evening, plan how the group will move from one location to the other. If you are drinking, be safe and designate a sober driver or plan for taxis. If you are in a walking city, seek locations that are within walking distance. And if walking is on the agenda, encourage guests to wear or bring flats.

12. Stay Together

Try not to let the group dynamic fall away. Everyone should feel included and get to spend time with the bride. It’s important that you call your venues well in advance to make reservations for a larger group. This will ensure the whole party can stay together all night. .

13. Document with Care

Take photos! Your bride will be happy to have them. Take a photo of each guest with the bride so everyone has a photo from the night. And if you get wilder with your photos agree to no posting on facebook or twitter so everyone can let loose. Have everyone sign up for an app like flock for instant, private sharing.

You might also get a blank book and have each guest write a note to the bride, it could be a favorite memory, how they met, some advice on how to build a strong marriage or even sex advice. You can then add photos and gift it to her.

14. Room for the Groom

Let him know where he can drop off some flowers or other little gifts in advance. A gift from him will make her feel very special.

Also, don’t rule the guys out all together. Old school bachelorette party rules can be broken. Build the party that suits your brides desires. I have done sex ed classes for the girls and then gone to the guy’s party in another hotel suite and done a sex ed class for them too! I have been a part of parties where the guy meet up with the girls later in the night.

15. Shine Light on the Bride

Think about dressing her up in a sparkly bride tank top or hat, a sweet tiara, a sash or feather boa. Make it obvious to everyone who sees here that it’s her special night.

What kind of music does she like? If she’s not specific, build a mix of happy dance tunes on your iphone and dock it on some speakers. Turn the music off when you want to pull everyone’s attention for a game or a toast.

18. Ice Breaker

If the party guests don’t know each other it can be fun to have the bride introduce each person. Gather everyone in a circle and go one by one and tell each person’s name. She can tell everyone how they met and what she loves most about them. This will help blend the group together and remind everyone they are all there for the same reason, to celebrate the bride. You can also do name tags, like these hilarious penis name tags.

19. Play Games

If I am part of the party I always play at least one game. I bring sex toy prizes for both the bride and some of the party guests.

There are also loads of bachelorette party games you can find by googling. Some of my favorites include:

Almost Newly Wed Game: Do a bride vs. groom question and answer trivia game. Gather your questions and have the groom answer his by email in advance. Then she can guess what his answers were in front of everyone. Think about questions they should both have the answer to. Like what is his favorite color? Where was your first kiss?

Lingerie Drinking Game: Everyone buys a pair of panties in the bride’s size. You put them all in a bag. The bride pulls each pair out and has to guess who bought them. The purson who bought them owns up and if she guesses wrong then she has to take a drink.

Ultimately the point of a bachelorette party is to smother the bride with love. It’s a huge celebration and expression of what she means to you and all her friends. Take good care of every party guest. Make sure no one is driving under the influence. Bring extra cash, maps, phone numbers and addresses of the locations of your stops along the evening. And have as much fun as possible!

Like this:

Can you believe I have performed for more than 240 bachelorette parties? All those crazy, beautiful brides-to-be… where are they now? (Probably knocked up and blaming me. Ha!)

“Wow! Ducky ‘teaches’ sex in an all new way; with humor and absolutely no guilt involved!”

Gather your friends together and let me edu-tain you! I will give you your own private Sex Ed Party – and give your bride-to-be or guest of honor new skills that she can use on her honeymoon, bedroom, kitchen floor, etc…!

It’s simple. I swoop in with lots of props, diagrams, real information and laughs! Plus the cost of the workshop includes a goodie bag full of sexy items for your guest of honor presented by me on behalf of all the people at the party.

Learn, have fun and make your party an event everyone will always remember!