funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people

P.S. Text me at work if you want to talk!!

Anniewrites, “This a note my roommate left me expressing her discontent with me because I would, while straightening up, put her placemats back in the drawer. I was putting away her placemats to clean up…but also because they are the most hideous things I have ever seen [see exhibit b]. She also got mad at me for putting out my old bathmat while I was washing hers. I especially like that she assumes I will ‘trash it’ when I am ready.”

Oh my god, those placemats are just plain hideous! I wouldn’t have just put them in the drawer Annie, I think I would’ve probably thrown them in the fireplace (while a fire was in it)! If I were Bonnie I not only wouldn’t have bought the placemats, but I certainly wouldn’t lay claim to them as my own! Bonnie, find something else of yours to decorate the house with!! As for the bathmat, Annie, you don’t have to part with yours until you are “ready” – don’t rush the separation process though, it’s not good for the psyche.

But I do have to say the note is very well written with paragraphs and just beautiful penmanship, and don’t get alot of that here on this site!

id love to see a reciprocal note about having replacement place mats ready to go for when the roomie is ready to trash hers, as they slide about on the table.

there has to be either more stress in the house for someone to freak out over putting place mats away…i only put mine out when i have company so it looks nice…or the note-writer needs to take a nap and stop being cranky.

So, yeah, not many people are going to like those place mats, but heh, in life you have to compromise. It sounds like she really likes them and what’s the harm of having them out on the table if it makes her feel good? Lighten up and stop being a style nazi. And embarrassing other people to make yourself feel superior= LAME.

Gahd! I don’t miss the wasted evil energy housemates bring out in one another. My housemate Brad used to label all his food, but would try to be funny. Like “Eggs O’Brad”. Then I found a six-month-old dozen of that effer’s eggs when moving out, and I wanted to stuff em in a box and mail them to him. No denying they were his at that point.

Team Compromise here. If Bonnie hates the bath mat and Annie hates the placemats, why don’t you agree to remove both? If it’s really an issue, Annie, which it seems to be for Bonnie, you need to work on integrating your two styles. Go shopping together for new bath mats or placemats that you can both agree on. Then if Bonnie still wants her placemats she can use them for end table covers in her bedroom. Problem solved.

This one smells of impending escalation. It’s like passive-aggressive theater:

“I’m pretending to put these away to be neat and conscientious, but I’m really making a PA statement about what I think of your taste.”

“Rather than ask WTF about my placemats and what you are implying about my taste, I will leave the fifth draft of a note in my best 8th grade handwriting after discussing it at length with my mom and two of my best friends from summer camp.”

Constantly putting away the (admittedly) hideous placemats is definitely PA. And really, the note’s not PA. It says very clearly what the problem is, that Annie’s decorated the place to look the way she wants it to look, without letting Bonnie do her share of the decorating in the common areas. Every time Bonnie tries to put something of hers out, Annie puts it away, replaces it “temporarily” or whatever.

At least Bonnie’s started a conversation about what’s bothering her, unlike Annie, who just briskly hides everything of Bonnie’s that she doesn’t like. They need to sit down and negotiate. Annie can’t stand the hideous placemats, but maybe there’s something else Bonnie would like to put out that would be more tolerable that they can compromise on.

I agree with Trevor and Ursula. The point of this site is to mock passive aggressive notes, not a person’s taste in furnishings.

Also, the people who think it’s also in bad taste for Bonnie to be upset when Annie has cleaned, why is that even relevant? Maybe it was Annie’s turn to clean.

Annie is being passive aggressive too, because she’s admitted to us that she put away the place mats because she finds them ugly. If they had been her place mats, she likely would have set them aside while cleaning the table and then put them back. I’m sure Bonnie knows this, and because she feels like nothing in the common areas reflect her taste it’s ticking her off.

Both of these girls are guilty of PA behavior, and I agree with Anon in #22 that they should solve the problem by picking out something they both like for the dining and bathrooms.

What prevents Annie from simply stating to Bonnie “Hey, I don’t care for the fugly mats, so when we’re not eating I’m going to put them away”?

I’m kinda on Bonnie’s side here. She seems to want to work things out politely, at least. Unless they live in some kind of goddamed show palace and entertain foreign dignitaries on a nightly basis, the fugly placemats don’t seem like such a ridiculous concession on Annie’s part. DON’T BE A SNOBBY BITCH!

I’m with Bonnie on this one. She wrote a perfectly pleasant note, and everything she asked seemed reasonable. If Annie had a problem with that note, she probably would be hard to live with, and Bonnie should get some credit for putting up with what seems like a controlling roommate.

I was immediately struck by Bonnie’s sweet, childlike penmanship (not a good thing, in my experience, as it usually indicates emotional immaturity).

Then I was struck by that place mat. Seems a bit racy to me. What are those three in the middle doing?! Is that one naked? Is the one in the back going to kiss the others or is he just enjoying the antics of the other two? And what on earth is under the shirt/dress of the one on the right and why is he caressing it!?

For an emotionally immature chick, she sure seems to appreciate a little of the salacious with her meal.

It’s a little PA to put your roommates’ ugly place mats away under the guise of cleaning, but Bonnie should really lighten up before freaking out that all of her stuff has gone missing. As this site proves, she’s lucky enough that she has a roommate who cares to clean. This whole thing could be solved by compromise.

As someone who has been roommates with a person who was already living in the house before I moved in, and had to keep the vast majority of my very nice household stuff crammed into a storage shed in the backyard, I know how Bonnie feels. Lighten up, Annie. Is it your place and is Bonnie just renting a room from you, or does the place belong to both of you? Do you want it to feel like home to her, or do you want her to feel like you wish she would just stay in her bedroom and only creep out after you are asleep? While you’re at it, why don’t you post some pics of your decor? I’m sure we could all have fun trashing your idea of what looks good.

Good lord . . . those are fucking ugly. Why in the world would she find those “nice”? SERIOUSLY!? What are they made of? Plastic covered felt? Looks like they came from a dollar store, a really crappy dollar store.

I’m with team “Annie is a Twat.” That was a nice note, it wasn’t passive aggressive or even aggressive. Annie sounds like a vile human being, a terrible snob, and someone who communicates by posting private messages for the whole world to see.

I know it’s nice to be 23 and know everything about life, but being an adult is about compromise. Someday you’ll grow up — hopefully — and laugh at yourself for being such a bitch.

#38…you beat me to it. I like the placemats, I think they are cool. That being said, if you’re not eating at the table, put ‘em away. I don’t know of anyone in my life that considers placemats as decoration.

Agreeing with its a PA contest. “Text me if you want to talk” and leaving notes – what is this 5th grade. Grow up and have a conversation. It’s called talking to each other. And sending the note and the pix in – come on – begging for sympathy or at least snide comments.

If I were to be invited to a dinner party, and sat down at the table with those placemats in front of me… well, I don’t think I would be able to eat, instead I would concentrate on just how much I hate those mats and I would most likely say something about them to my host…

Time for Annie and Bonnie to go to Pier 1 or World Market and pick out some placemats and bathmats together that they both agree on!

Tempest in a teapot. This roommate situation is really too small to get worked up over, in my opinion. What’s the big deal about having to take your placemats out of a drawer at mealtime? They should only be out when you eat on them anyway. Or in this case, when you are carrying them to the too-ugly-to-use trash. And if she wants other stuff of her own, she should hang a painting or two, preferrably not of wierd fat Italian chefs, but whatev.

I think those placemats were on sale at Garden Ridge like 3 years ago. I think they are discriminatory to overweight chefs. What about their feelings?? Although, it would make a great diet plan. Always eating off of those things…looking at what you will become if you keep eating. It’s better than bulemia!!!

Heathen and others of like mind:
Any time you communicate with your roommate about something sorta contentious like this, and where there’s clearly tension going on, in a NOTE, it’s automatically PA in my book.

Also, I do think if it’s true that Bonnie doesn’t have much stuff in the apartment that’s hers, that she should be able to put her placemats out. However, not these. Hideousness is in the eye of the beholder, and while the consensus reveals they are considered such by most, that’s not the reason for why they must go. In any shared housing situation “neutral” is the key, and these are not. Like neon beer signs, only a very small and specific set of people would like these mats. Bonnie should find mats she likes that are a little more neutral.

P/A is all about the moment when, probably in reaction to some mundane or trivial disagreement, you decide to pick up a pen and spend 10 or 20 minutes putting your frustration into prose instead of having a face to face conversation . We’re all fascinated by the thought process that goes into that moment.

Although the placemats are hideous, and it is tacky to leave them out in between meals, annie sounds like the p.a. one to me in this situation. Hiding the placemats in order to clean? Have you made it clear just how much you dislike the placemats? In a face-to-face conversation? Sure, the note is p.a. too, the p.s is classic. But I think hiding the ‘mats in a drawer instead of vocalizing one’s dislike is far more p.a. than leaving a timid, obfuscating note.

Umm… not that I love them but those are super kitsch. And super fun! I think both roomies are major bitches.
PS My boyfriend’s mom leaves out her placemats. But this gets better: they’re meshy/grids that crumbs and liquid go right through.

1. All placemats are hideous. I have never seen beautiful placemats. As placemats go, they’re halfway decent (is thinking of the flourescent pink, green and yellow vinyl ones present in my house as a child).
2. Maybe Bonnie’s dead grandma gave her those ugly things, so they’re all sentimental. Ever think of that?
3. It’s her house too. It’s really terrible when you feel like you don’t belong in her own house. You should be putting your roommates happiness ahead of your petty dislikes.
4. If you really hate them, maybe you can go shopping together for a bunch of new things that you can both compromise on and split the bill. That way you’ll both feel at home.
4. Annie, you’re a total style nazi, and you were a jerk to post this. Bonnie seems like a pretty cool chick, actually. Who cares if she likes ugly placemats? DEAL. I’m sure she hates your hideous curtains or something. I encourage Bonnie to hide things (ie BATH MAT) and replace them with more of her own stuff. Preferably in colours you hate.

Team Notes are PA. Also, I have placemats, and I see nothing wrong with leaving them out all the time, since my table is new and I want it protected but not covered. That said, my placemats are a plain black satin, not dancing chefs. Also, has no one noticed the food splatter on this placemat? Are they putting away dirty placemats? Ew. The fact is that these two girls really need to have a discussion about shared living space. Neutral is definitely the way to go.

everyone is saying how vindictive it was for her to send pictures of the placemats in, but you know if she didn’t everyone would be saying “now, we need to see what those placemats look like in order to make a proper call on this thing.”

I am totally with you on that on laura! As for the P.S. I was thinking about this earlier, and if there were only a way to scan them in, they could start a spin off website called “passiveaggressivetexts.com” – Lord knows I have sent a few (okay, ALOT!) in my time!

I agree with PatHMV. At least Bonnie tried to discuss the issue with Annie, whereas Annie just posted the note for all to see. That’s maturity, jeez. Who cares how ugly the mats are or whose are used in the bathroom-the issue is that if Annie doesn’t like something of Bonnie’s-she hides it, and Bonnie is bothered by this and she has every right to be. She pays half the bills, half the rent-she has as much right to put her stuff out as Annie. The note is not PA, its simply one roommate trying to communicate with the other. Annie comes off as a control/neat freak. How exactly is putting place mats away considered cleaning?

She writes a nice and polite note and ends it with a “hope you had a good time with your family” and you rush to the internets because omg you like that passiveaggresive site and this might qualify so screw Bonnie. Right?

It sounds like the passive-aggressive is the one putting the place mats in the bedroom…..
If the rest of the place has your stuff, she is entitled to use her placemats.
I’m sure if you told her you were only using the thin, old, dirty bathmat while the new one was in the wash, I’m sure she would understand.
It sounds like you should live alone.

My girlfriend is in a similar situation, with a few exceptions. She cleans everything AND she has the placements she wants to leave out. Her roommate who doesn’t clean anything puts the placemats out of sight when she sees them… they aren’t anything like this placements though! They’re just regular, red fabric placemats. I’d say team placemats though, just because it’s frustrating when you have only a few decorations you like in a room full of your roommate’s and then the roommate hides yours…. cleaning has nothing to do with decorations in this argument.

how is putting placemats in a drawer passive aggressive? That’s where mine go – you know, in between meals. Who said anything about a bedroom?

In addition to the fact that she could have more easily said this all to Annie, Bonnie’s being PA by ascribing motive to her roommate’s actions. A simple “Please leave the placemats out, ” (with or without “because I like the house to look like a diner”) is better than “I know you don’t like them, but you’re being mean.”

They are not placemats in bad taste; they are frightening – possibly meant to for Bonnie to discourage herself (or Annie) from eating too much. Annie is undermining the aversion therapy! How PA is that?!?

Annie should leave a letter saying that she bought a new placemats to replace the ugly ones that won’t stay in the drawer and a new trash can to put Bonnie’s placemats in whenever she is ready.

Have you checked out any of the other notes??? We go insane here reading too much into these notes. We can almost figure out everything about a person by the note they leave from what their romantic relationships are like to what undies they probably have on. (At least we think we can.) And we love, love, love doing it.

After today’s comments, I realize I have never thought so much about placemats in my entire life. I am totally rethinking every placemat and table linen I own now.

My mom used to make placemats out of calendar pictures and Contact paper, bless her heart.

The note does have hallmarks of passive-aggressiveness: complimenting on your style taste, while saying her stuff is rammed in her room, the dig at your natty bathmat (and offer of her new one), and the “okey-dokey”.

However, to really judge the placemats, I’d have to see them in total context of the kitchen. Most things look horrible close up. That said, those mats aren’t the worst thing in the world, but not my cup of tea.

The putting the mats you hate away while cleaning is definitely p/a. Actually, a great solution is to “accidentally” leave them on the stove and melt them, then have to throw them away. Again, P/A, but effective.

Or, you can GFY and eat off the damn ugly mats. You say potato, I say fuck you.

I’ve lived in a house where I wasn’t allowed to have my own things in the common areas, and let me tell you its not a very nice feeling.
While those place mats are defiantly UGLY, she DOES have a right to have them out.
And I do tend to agree, humiliating someone else to feel superior is pretty lame, and immature.

joobs, you are right, I was debating the same thing earlier today – why are we talking about placemats so damn much? answer, because that’s what’s in the note! it’s sad but unfortunately a way of life for us now…

oh, and btw, I think that annie is prolly wearing white bikini briefs (or possibly boys spiderman underoos) while bonnie definitely has on a leopard print thong that shows when she sits or bends over… anyone who likes placemats like that has to be a little bit of a risk taker!

Mrs. Bender – According to everyone else here, Bonnie even liking placemats in the first place is not normal. I agree with the underwear selections of each girl. So what do my plain black satin placemats say?

Gee whiz, I hope that there is more to their rivalry than this and that there is some other pent-up anger. If this were the worst problem I had with ANY of my former roommates, I would be very happy.
As for the placemats, they look pretty similar to the ones on my table right now. I went out of town for a week, and my boyfriend’s mother visited and put these on our table. They were to replace the ones she had made herself, which we had stained. We don’t really care enough about the placemats to care about whether we like the design or not. We don’t usually even eat at the kitchen table. And yeah, we leave the placemats out all the time.
Team Annie Needs to Lighten Up and be happy if this is her only issue with her roommate (although I suspect it is not the whole story).

I agree with joe up in comment #44. I moved into a house with people who had been living there for a while before I joined there household and the whole place was decorated to their tastes. Anything I wanted to put up was met with a chipper “We’ll see!”

It is very grating to live with someone who is theoretically a partner in your living space but who takes a “possession is 9/10″ view of the public spaces.

I think that if Annie doesn’t like the placemats (and I’m not saying I do) she should probably suggest a day when they can redocorate the public areas together so they are both happy and feel at home.

Bamboo sock, Mrs. Bender? I’ve never heard of that! Can they do that with bamboo? What are they like? I need to shop more, I guess.

Bamboo undies. Just be careful walking past giant pandas.

Doesn’t anyone here besides me have placemats or towels you use everyday, and then really nice ones for company?

Bathmats that slide around are dangerous. I hate stepping out of the shower (and into my bamboo undies) and slipping around. Now, placemats are just annoying, but not inherently dangerous. Unless you are dancing on the table…

Annie must really dislike her roommate if she chose to send this note in to PAN, rather than talk about it with the roommate or leave her a note. It might have been a minor issue before, but there’s no going back now. These two should not live together.

joobs, I don’t know about you, but I have to have non-skid backings on my placemats because I find myself dancing on the table quite often… hee hee. I have my nice paper towels for company – they have designs on them! The bamboo socks – they feel just like cotton, but they are supposed to give your feet more breathablity and keep them drier – adidas and their sports technology! What will they think of next? A smart shoe that senses your foot and the terrain that in turn will adjust to give you the best support possible? Already done and it comes with a CD-ROM!

1. They pretty totally suck, and I mean that in a good way. :0)
2. Annie is a control freak bitch who can’t be bothered by other people and/or their needs/wants/desires, and needs to make enough money to live alone.
3. I dig kitch. This shit is not kitch. :0)
4. Annie, I want badly to get or give a note to send to P/A.. it’s likely not to happen, but I understand why you did this, you had to get in on the action.. ::cough::cough::COW:: I lived with my brother and his wife for a while, had to crowd all my shit in my room, just like poor Bonnie. I hated it, felt all the time like I was an unwanted (albeit rent/utility bill paying ) visitor. So,
Team – Bonnie

Those placemats are hideous. Simply hideous. Bonnie should have her brain put in a drawer if she feels those are a nice touch. It might be harsh, but I lost eyesight for 10 minutes after witnessing that travesty

1. the bubbles are by his butt and his butt only. i hope he is using eucalyptus bubble bath.
2. that poor ducky is staring STRAIGHT into the crotchal region.
3. the hat.
4. the little neckerchief or whatever that thing is

i think annie should be relieved that these arent the floor mats in the bathroom. kinda makes the placemats almost livable.

I agree with Joe #44. I also moved into an apt. that had been occupied previously by my new roomate and she wouldn’t let me put ANYTHING around the apt. signifying I too was paying rent. She even removed a sticky-note reminder I had put on the fridge. Annie keeps it up and she’ll be looking for a new roomate soon. Her new roomate’s placemates may be worse.

Aw, Bonnie should be allowed to have her stuff out, too. Does Annie pay more? Why should she get to decide what is nice and what isn’t for the whole apartment?

Something does seem fishy. Annie says that she was just putting the matts away to clean up. So why is it necessary to complain about how ugly they are? She seems to have wanted to take them out of the common area.

The thing that strikes me about the whole situation is how the roomates’ communication is so bad. Each one has a point (ugly placemats, thin, slippery bathmat) but why can’t they TALK (face to face) about this. I don’t get the sense that they’ve tried that.

If they’re splitting the rent evenly, both roommates should be able to feel at home with some of their things. I think if Annie could be more flexible on this point the roommate probably wouldn’t feel the need to make such an issue about her (quite ugly) placemats.

If you want to have a home decorated completely the way you like it without compromise, plan to live alone!

Dear Bonnie, your tasteless crap is crammed in your bedroom because it is truly hideous and shouldn’t be inflicted on anyone. Being constantly surrounded by such a horrible assortment of kitsch trash has clearly driven you insane, hence the fact that you think that those so-called placemats belong on the table, or anywhere other than in the rubbish bin for that matter. PS – I trashed your new bathmat because it, too, is horrible. Text me if you want to talk, but don’t expect a reply.

cre8tivewmn, you bring up a valid point about the lack of communication. I was thinking about the line “text me at work if you want to talk.” Do you ever wonder if people are losing the skills it takes to have a good, meaningful conversation because of technology?

One of my students said at the bus stop where she waits each morning, there are about 12 kids and no one talks. They are all on their cells texting, or have their i-pods plugged into their ears. I think that’s sad.

How about “call me if you want to talk?” Or, “let’s get coffee or have dinner together?”

Maybe you have poor taste when it comes to picking roommates. I feel sorry for your future husband. Hopefully, he’ll notice the nitpicking early, and leave to have a life that includes someone who can compromise. Living alone with all your pretty, pretty things may make you happy.

Truly being passive-aggressive: One good idea: She should put the placemats up for bid on ebay. I know there is some big woman living in the midwest who will say, “Oh, my! I just gotta have them dar placemats! I bet theys from Paris, France!”

Bonnie is ungrateful. Annie does laundry, is courteous enough to put out another bath mat while the ‘good’ one is in the wash…and Bonnie complains. Sheesh.

I don’t like place mats, but when I was living at home we never left them out. They were taken off the top of the fridge, used, wiped down with Windex and put back at the end of the meal. I don’t like to look at them, either. It’s cluttered.

I really really really hate to say this, because those placemats will NEVER be allowed in my house, but, while I’m never on Team Write-A-Note-When-It-Would-Be-Quicker-To-Just-Talk-To-Them, I am on Team It’s-Her-House-Too-Ugly-Placemats-Regardless.

It’s not passive aggressive to put placemats away when you’re cleaning. However, it IS passive aggressive to let your roommate know that bothers you in a note, instead of just saying “Hey, Annie, can we leave out the placemats when we’re not eating? I really like them.”

She cleans? She dose laundry? She recognizes passive aggressive notes for the juvenile bullshit they are? Team Annie for life.

I have seen those place mats in person, and let me tell you: that shit has GOT TO GO. Side note: the word “yours” does not have an apostrophe before the “s.” Bad grammar and bad taste? Bonnie should be grateful that Annie is there to decorate, clean, and compose appropriate sentences.

It is always passive aggressive to leave a note, rather than talking it out, when you’re having a problem with a roommate.

But don’t blame Annie for submitting the note to this website…the whole point of this website is to submit passive aggressive notes, right? And if she hadn’t included the picture of the placemat, everyone would have asked what it looked like.

Its called compromise. If both are sharing the rent, then giving in a little is not a ball breaker. If Annie feels its hideous, then don’t look. As for the bathmat, the test whether its to be replaced or not is if as Bonnie had claimed, it is slippery. There is un underlying safety issue that has to be addressed.

I don’t like the mats, but there’s been a lot of stuff I didn’t like in houses I’ve shared. I just ignored it. Shared living space requires tolerance.
I have a ‘style nazi’ friend who rents out a room. She often complains to me about the ‘style crimes’ of her lodgers (who generally don’t stay long – funny that…)
Crimes such as replacing her potted herbs in the wrong order after using them (‘can’t she see it’s a decor choice?!’), or leaving a bottle of shampoo on the bathtub (she hates to see ‘products’ in her bathroom).
She’s a good friend, but if lived with her, I’m pretty sure we’d soon be communicating using notes like this one!

Nope. I agree with the note-writer. She undoubtedly doesn’t like some of the craptasticness that Annie has around the place, and I bet she leaves it alone. Putting ugly things away is a lot more passive-aggressive than any notewritingness.

they ARE bad place mats, but with my roommate from hell experiences, id probably just shut it if someone cleaned up after my messes and such and put away placemats, no matter how much i liked them. its not like a painting on the wall that gets taken down. its PLACEMATS.

if they are sinking to this level of pettiness, i expect a very nice passive aggressive note of why they cant live with each other, much like the one i left for my roommate who literally had a litter box with 2 inches of cat crap out the top of it.

Can you imagine how long this thread would be if the note were actually about something seriously important and/or life threatening?!

I make typos, too. And I’m nervous because I’ve called out a couple of people. But, I only do it when they’ve been snotty in the first place, like that master’s degree in psychology person trying to do a drive-by Freud on Mishee, yet couldn’t spell “recommend.” I mean, if you’re going to talk the talk…

Ohhhhh! Thats what my mouth uttered when the picture popped up. Wow she really does have her own style. I’m glad I don’t have a roomate, I would only move in with someone that had a VERY similar style to mine and then we could trade off who can decorate what and when. I recently got an offer to move in with a male friend,but this makes me re-think it even more.

Makes me ever so grateful I live alone. I hate the very concept of placemats. Just one more thing to wash. Give me a glass table with a bottle of windex and a wad of paper towels nearby and I’m good to go.

If you choose to live with someone you have to compromise, there’s no way around that. When each roommate pays 1/2 the rent, each of them have the right to have 1/2 the apartment decorated with their crap, regardless of how ugly it might be.

If you don’t like it, either choose roommates more carefully, or go live by yourself.

I used to live with this girl in college who had a taste for decoration that was very different than mine. She bought plastic placemats with SUNFLOWERS AND COWS on them…not to mention very ugly towels in the bathroom. But hey, I go to hang art decor the way I wanted and to make the kitchen pretty to my taste.

Compromising is part of having roommates…I hate the fact that she posted the pic of the placemats for everyone to mock them (although I find them ugly, so what? Obviously Bonnie doesn’t.) That’s way more PA than the note.

Personally, I hope that Bonnie bought those placemats for no other reason than to horrify her prissy roommate. I think her next step should be to FRAME them and hang them up like artwork, and get more fat-chef accessories like this stunning wall clock and cookie jar.

So the placemats are hideous, but if it’s her one bit of decoration in public, just suck it up and roll with it, okey dokey? Then maybe she won’t mind that the rest of the (what I assume are tasteful) decorations are yours.

I like the placemats too, but that is beside the point. It seems like the roommate that left the note was being very nice and maybe some understanding on your part would be in order. There has to be give and take in any relationship. We all have different ideas of what is tasteful and what is not and you both need to learn how to work together to have a more cohesive adult relationship. Good luck…

Actually, I think you posting her note on here is passive aggressive. Her note was pretty clear and thoughtful. Sure her place mats ain’t great, but till you can afford to own your own house and no longer need to have roommates, that’s the stuff you have to deal with. If you split expenses with this chick, then you split the house decor. If you don’t like it, get another roommate or learn to compromise.

What’s truly sad about those mats? An actual artist painted that picture, and it is just ONE in a series. I worked at a department store where we sold not just the mats, but the co-ordinating napkins. If you felt like going all out-you could also purchase the 40×60 cast of the original oil painting for your apartments walls! Just think, you could enjoy that lovely art in EVERY room of your home.

Ah there’s too much history we don’t know… like did they go 50:50 on the apartment? If so, Bonnie has every right to get crabby about her place mats, if she’s renting a room in someone else’s apartment, then no, she’s no right to get crabby.

I think the bath mat swap is a great idea… the place mats are a trifle naff, after all, even if you do like the Muppets… then again, that looks like a vintage/antique table with 1960s bent plywood chairs… if that’s so they both deserve imprisonment for taste crimes.

I think the issue isn’t about the percentage stake in the apartment at all. It comes down to ownership of the table. My table, my placemats.

Bonnie is clearly concerned that Annie’s stuff seems to dominate the apartment but is that because Annie has invested more in furnishings? If so, Bonnie needs to take her placmats and stash them in her closet with the rest of her thrift store junk.

Sorry? Annie has the issue here. She is PA and
a bully. Why does she need us to say she’s right? Because she knows that what she is doing by putting the note and picture up is wrong. It is spiteful and she wants everyone to tell her Bonnie is the “bad” roommate. Sorry girlie – YOU are the bad roommate. I also noticed you didn’t post anything illustrating your discerning eye and good taste for us to oggle either.

I actually agree with #8. The note is pretty clear, and I do not think it is very aggressive. I am sure there is more to your relationship problems than some home decor issues. Perhaps you two need to communicate more effectively. If you don’t it is easy to get your toes stepped on (eg getting your feelings hurt by comments like “ready to trash it”)
God, having room mates is hard. Its like dating someone you don’t love. And no sex, either!

This all depends on who was in the place first. If it was originally Annie’s place, predecorated, then Bonnie needs to just leave it be….after all in that case, Annie would be the more stable and probably more responsible for the shared dwelling.

I live with the owner of my flat and I hate most of her tacky pictures and ornaments. I hate that I can’t leave a newspaper or TV Guide on the coffee table (it’s swiftly put in the drawer when I am out). I hate that there’s nothing of me in my home. I pay enough rent for that! I’m with Bonnie, love, you may be mental and have terrible taste, but I know how you feel.

OMG i totally sympathize with bonnie. even though we split 50/50 on everything (even cable tv that i never watched) my roommate last year at school would either ask me to put stuff away or do it for me when i wasn’t there, even if it was just something small like mail or something. BUT she’d leave ALL of her shit laying around. so basically the only space in the apartment that was truly mine was my bedroom. everything else was basically my roommate’s just because of how controlling she was over it. things did not go well that year….

I don’t think the note was passive aggressive. I think Annie is the passive aggressive one. She cleans and puts the placemats away despite her roommate asking her not to put them away (you can clean the table and put them back). The note, to me, was articulate and well thought out. I’d rather have her for a room mate than Annie.

mats for sale at upyoursalley along with dozens of other fugly stuff. bad taste is killing the fat chefs of europe. look out or that motif will spread all over.not that ugly really . if she can’t wait while you clean to see her stuff show her where the washer/dryer are.

straight up, if Annie is not allowing someone who pays HALF the rent add their own decorative touches, then Annie is a SELFISH BITCH. I’ve lived with people like her and I fucking HATE people who think their personal style is better.

and those placemats weren’t THAT bad, Annie. If you’re gonna actually DICTATE what can be in the house then you should get your OWN goddamn place, bitch.

point is annie is probably the fat one whos unhappy with her life and takes it out on her cute roommate who is trying to be nice but stand up for herself against her overbearing, bitch ogre of a roommate.

this girl is actually trying to approach the situation instead of posting it online behind her roommates back like annie.

Who cares about what the place mats look like, you people are missing the point. Bonnie has a valid request. Annie is being mean for making fun of her request. It is quite obvious that there is an underlying issue of Annie being a control freak in the apartment.

I am painfully familiar with this design. This was the wallpaper border at my last job. It could be much worse – in the bathroom, we had a wall hanging of one of those creepy chefs sitting on the toilet. Yikes.