These last three weeks had been the longest and most frenetic of my life as a trying hard tri-media man.

Plus or minus my pretense at the theatrical and some upcoming film project, first with students of my modern Philippine film class at the university and then some wild commercial screenplay projects that have begun with some wild stories of immigrant life--this project so wildly existing in the head, the weeks had been a bundle of joy that today, I fulfilled yet again a guest hosting job at Radio KORL 1180 AM's "Nagmamahal sa Iyo" by Susan Domingo Bald, with today's topic centering on love and its complexities.

As in the previous co-hosting job for three Sundays (Feb 11, 18, & 25) in a row with Danny Agsalog's "Anggulo," that tackled a variety of issues bordering on the comic and the light side of Philippine American life, today's show with Susan was fun--and only fun it could be, with calls coming from a diverse group of listeners.

Susan and I had fun riposting questions and granting the listeners their request that I recite one more time my love poems, the request from two of the callers who are the topnotch decision makers of the Dingrenios Association, a solid group I should say, with no less than their mayor Dr. Modesto Castro flying in from Dingras, Ilocos Norte, to crown the three muses of the grand coronation last February 23, the night before the Fiesta Ilokana and Amianan that we put together at the Philippine Consulate General on Pali Highway.

In Honolulu, Hawai`i, you have no way to go except to become a party animal, which probably explains that there is not much time left in the hands of writers because of the many community activities that they go during weekends.

Many of these social gatherings are worth going into if one were to look at how communities are built from gatherings like these, the gatherings solidifying relationships, contacts, and networks.

As part of the advocacy strategy of the Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program which I coordinate, I cannot miss occasions like this, and in my exchange with Dr Raymund Liongson of the Philippine Studies Program of Leeward Community College of the University of Hawai`i, Charlene Cuaresma of the Asian American Network for Cancer Awareness, Research and Training, and Helene Manzano of Domestic Violence Clearinghouse and Legal Hotline, things are clear in terms of our community involvement--a direction that Dr Liongson is also taking, bringing the academe to the community, and not just simply waiting for the community to come to the hallowed halls of the academe.

I told Dr Liongson: "Our duty is to commit our programs to the people. Our duty is make our programs available to the community."

And so I began my other writer's already dedrazzled self: to be a radio broadcaster and always using such a radio broadcast as the launching pad to educating our people more and more about the urgency of preserving and sustaining the heritage language of all of our peoples, in the Philippines, in the diaspora, and among the ranks of our "hapas"--our mestizos--and our local borns.

My having been a coordinator of a language and heritage program has given some kind of a perspective that is privileged, affording me data and facts and ideas and vantage points that are not readily available to everyone. I can only thank the gods for this privilege.

While coming up with the finishing touches of my own radio show that, I think, I will name as "The Philippine American Radio Show," with segments highlighting the diversity of the cultures and languages of the homeland and the evolved cultures of the immigrants kailian, and delivered in three langauges initially, I thought and thought a lot about the future of the hapas and the local borns in our midst.

My concern is not whether these hapas and local borns will have the boldness and daring to accept their multilayered identities in a spirit of renewed communal vigor.

MY concern is how much space is given the hapas and local borns to questions themselves, their own sets of purposes, their dreams of making it big somewhere beyond these islands. The island fever is not a myth but an ugly reality for those who have the means to unwind even in workdays.

I liked the phoned in request for me to recite my love poems, and I thought that I was prepared, with pieces I drew from two collections I put together way back in the 90s, with only two copies left in my collection because I must have distributed the low-budget books to friends, free of charge of course when they acted as if they were the last poor person on earth like me.The books are "Rugso dagiti Panawen ti Risiris" and "Derrep iti Panawen ti Dangadang."

In the poems, I talked about love in its earnest, its joys, its pain. I talked about love in a loud and proud voice, in a soft and modulated tone, with passion in the heart remaining in there, with passion in the soul, also remaining in there. Some samples:

I am going multipartite now: the radio, the print medium, the stage. I wrestled with Manang Pacing Saludes so now I am directing the komedia at the Waipahu Intermediate come March 31. Let us see how far we can go.

God, I did not know I can summon all the energy! In a couple of weeks, I might formally start my radio program on early Sunday morning, one program meant to push ahead with our advocacy for heritage language and culture and for all other causes linked with Philippine American immigrant issues.

For those with that incalculable savviness in internet technology around the world, you can log on to www.korlam.com. Hear me guesting on Sundays, 12-2PM, Honolulu Time.

The warriors call thisthe spring offensive, a battle born of blooming roses and wild sunflowersin Los Angeles or Honolulu hillsidesas in the plains of Kabulor Baghdad.

We now cometo mourn for the death of these flowers, pretty and faithfulin this spring when life beginswhen the memory of the coming summerspeaks volumes about children's laughtersas we run to gather what petalswe can sniff, not stray bombs,not death, but beginnings we recognizein stalks alive with colorsswaying with the evening wind from the sea,salty and fresh, and taunting the starsflickering their lusting for the earthreciting silences to replace languageand its failure to stop the merchants of death.

They play with words nowas if murder is the same as lovingand the notes to killing the innocentsare decalogues to winning a strange warwith no name except annihilating meaningsand what it takes to mean something.

The times are strange,the clock does not move as beforeexcept to declare that another mananother woman another childanother place another cityanother father another motheranother dream another homelandanother story another godanother river another homeanother memoryanother salvationanother dream

ILOKANO PROGRAM OF UH-MANOA AND PHILIPPINE CONSULATE JOINED HANDS TO HOLD FIESTA ILOKANA AND AMIANAN

By Aurelio S. Agcaoili, Ph.D. Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program University of Hawai`i at Manoa

For the first time, it happened: a fiesta of no other name. And we at the Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program of the University of Hawai`i at Manoa are proud because with the assistance and present presence of the Philippine Consulate General of Hawai`i, we were able to pull it through.

I speak in the first person, but I must speak in the plural, in the “we” that is inclusive because so many named and unnamed individuals and organizations helped us along the way, with many of them giving up so many things in order to be part of this fiesta, that, together with the Philippine Consulate, we hope to institutionalize starting next year. This means that from hereon, we will soon be coming together each February to celebrate the variety and diversity that we are as a people in the Philippines and in the diaspora.

For this year, we limited the fiesta to the areas of Kailokuan, Kordiliera, and Kagayan—the three K’s making up what we would call the geographic continuum Amianan, even if the cultures and languages in this northwestern part of the country are as diverse as some small United Nations. The Ilokanized portion of the Cordilleras and the Cagayan Valley would justify this fiesta concept even if the organizers were cognizant of the differences and the richness of the cultures and languages because of these differences. But somewhere, we had to make difficult choices because this fiesta had to be held.

In December, Consul Irene Susan Natividad asked us at the Ilokano program if we can hold a cultural festival to celebrate the National Arts Month. This was towards New Year, a time when everyone was on vacation or simply busy or too rushed because of the social obligations and expectations of the holidays. I told her right away: we would be happy to do it.

By January, I met with some of the Ilokano faculty and the ball started to roll. Committees of one were formed, but they were formed. And the students, the always-reliable Timpuyog: Ilokano Student Association came in to help, with their fresh and novel ideas on how best to hold a celebration like this, with all the necessary linkage and network building that it required.

By mid-January, organizing work became frenetic and this lasted till a few days before the big day. In all these frenzy, things fell in place because the people and organizations we approached to help offered to help—and came to help with generosity of heart. Some offered to cook their best recipe as in the case of Perlita Sadorra and Mrs. Rose Daproza, both of Gumil Hawai`i, one of the more sturdy writing associations in the State.

Right at the start, Charlene Cuaresma of the Asian American Network for Cancer Awareness, Research and Training (AANCART), a National Cancer Institute Community Network Program, came in to help, soliciting at the same time the help of Domestic Violence Clearinghouse and Legal Hotline’s Helena Manzano. The two organizations eventually joined hands in the putting together of the key concepts for the 4K Creative Writing Initiative of the Ilokano Program of UH.

The 4K Creative Writing Initiative—Kur-itan Kontra Kanser ken Kinaranggas iti Taeng/Writing Up to Write Off Cancer and Domestic Violence—is a poetry writing workshop intended to bridge the gap between creative language use and critical awareness on two health issues affecting the immigrant Filipino communities of Hawai`i. Facilitated and directed by Aurelio Agcaoili of the University of Hawai`i, the 4K Creative Writing Initiative will be offered as a series of workshops for the larger Filipino community. The outputs of the workshop participants will be turned into a book and disseminated help create awareness on these two health issues. The 4K Creative Writing Initiative was held in the morning, with Manzano and Cuaresma giving the context for the 4K Creative Writing Initiative.

The afternoon cultural extravaganza delivered the goods as it promised, with Angel Ugayam and Virgil Apostol leading the participants in the ugayam, a blessing and thanksgiving ritual prayer common the Kankanaeys of the Cordilleras. The former legislator Felipe Abinsay Jr, Executive Director for the Oahu Workforce Investment Board Danny Agsalog, and Consul Irene Susan Natividad addressed those who came to take part in the fiesta.

As in the old times, the rituals of the ages took center stage in the celebration, with Amado Yoro Gumil Oahu, Paul Taong of 1st 2nd Mortgage, and Rose Daproza of Gumil Hawai`i reciting their poems while Nora Cabico of Gumil Hawai`i, Leonora Albayalde of Bilingual Access, Kathleen Aguilar Guillen of 1st 2nd Mortgage, and the pair Prof. Precy Espiritu of the University of Hawai`i and Lydia Abajo of Domestic Violence Clearinghouse soothing us with their songs we have not heard for a long time, their passionate rendition of the tunes of our youth charging us with more energies that are linked with the memory of a culture and its gifts.

Joseph Gabor and his singing group rendered a medley of old and contemporary Ilokano songs, their choral performance extraordinarily one of dolce, delight, and more dolce, more sweetness you cannot help but sing along with them.

And lots of dancing we did, with the tadek and salidsid combined starting off the footwork, the steps fast-faced and age-defying, with Dr. Estrella Pada Taong, Kathleen Aguilar Guillen, Virgil Apostol, and Aurelio Agcaoili strutting their way on the stage, down with the audience, and again in that gift of movement and self that reminded us of earth, sky, the universe, the cosmos in the payaws of the Cordilleras, the movement of the wind, the flight of birds, the romantic movements of men and women, and the mating dramas of animals in the wild. Grace is grace even if youth was not one qualification we had, all of us almost past our prime. Enjoyment was personal, and that was reward enough, psychic and emotional, and memory-filled. For me, it is the thought that for the first time, I did not watch how the tadek and the salidsid are danced—I danced them, with my authentic G-strings, the baag of old, worn by the Ilokanos in the lowlands and the peoples of the Cordilleras as well.

The Sampaguita Dance Group came to dance—it was the day the dancers came as was the case of Bienvenido Santos’ narrative of an old-timer whose dream was to see the beautiful dancers from the homeland in order for him to remember again, the remembering also an act of becoming a member again: re-membering. We witnessed how the old steps of mature women transformed into nimble steps, sure and calculated, and orchestrated to form an ensemble of the visual play of bodies, colorful costumes, and smiling faces. Truly, Fely Unico, Domie Tesoro, Nilda Damo, Chris Barbosa, Nora Respicio, Tessie Facunla, Lourdes Billena, and Florence Lusano were the dancers we came for.

The hula dance of the father and sons tandem of Abraham Flores Jr. and sons Nagel and Nile proved that Ilokanos are not only singers and performers but disciples of Terpsichore as well, the muse of dancers. With their quick and sure-footed rendition of Kahiko Hula Kupe’e o Molokai, the muse could only be joyful and no less.

The day was long, with the dallot of Rizal Aguilar, Roxanne Taylan, and John Henry Acidera and yours truly giving us a glimpse of the communal and dramatic nature of the marriage rituals of the Ilokanos before the onset of colonization and this continuing pollution of its communal rituals of memory and memory-making so that history becomes everyday and lived daily.

Demonstrating the need to re-claim that memory in order to commence the act of self and communal healing was Virgil Apostol who has widely researched the healing arts of the Ilokanos, the peoples of Southeast Asia, the peoples of the Cordilleras and Cagayan Valley, and the holistic arts of the ancient Oriental peoples.

Timpuyog: Ilokano Student Organization of Hawai`i, as in all the activities involving the Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program of the University of Hawai`i was always there from Day One, its officers always supportive of the Ilokano Program’s causes big and small, its advisers Julius Soria and Clem Montero always taking up duties beyond classroom hours. The Timpuyog president, Sarah Agag, as all the other officers and members, were not simply hands but hearts as well, giving their all, many of them braving the heavy early downpour to help fix the venue and get ready with the knick-knacks.

Next year will not be another Fiesta Ilokana and Amianan. It will be bigger. And through the years, we hope to transform this Fiesta into a multipartite affair of those who see fit to celebrate and remember, to gather and re-gather, to come together and enjoy each other’s presence.

The sponsors came with their gifts of food and presence: the Philippine Studies Program of Leeward Community College of Dr. Raymund Liongson; the University of the Philippines Alumni Association of Hawai`i; the Pilipina Rural Project-Domestic Violence Clearinghouse and Legal Hotline; the KORL 1180 AM, the 1ST 2ND Mortgage of Hawai`i Inc.; Annak ti Kailokuan; the Gumil Hawai`i; and the Asian American Network for Cancer Awareness, Research and Training.

Life in exile is a bit sad. But with a fiesta like this one, festive and communing, the sadness inherent in an exilic life can be turned into joy. The able, professional, and persuasive emceeing of Julius Soria, faculty member of the Ilokano Program, and Sarah Agag, president of Timpuyog, gave us reasons to be glad for that one Saturday that we decided to leave all our cares behind and come to the Philippines Consulate to enjoy each other’s company.

At the forefront in the work of advancing, promoting, and preserving the cultures of the peoples of the Philippines in the diaspora is the recently concluded Fiesta Ilokana and Amianan, a one-day gathering that saw the various immigrant communities showcasing their cultural heritage.

The Fiesta was under the auspices of the Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program and the Philippine Consulate General of Hawai`i in collaboration with various individuals, organizations and cause-oriented groups. The Fiesta was also in consonance with the spirit of the Philippines’ National Arts Month, a month-long celebration of the arts and culture showcasing the best of artistic productions of the various communities in the country and held each February.

If at all there is one thing that sums up the event, it is this: communitas.

Communitas in its most pristine and unadulterated form is the same sense by which we go back to the ways of the men and women of the country uncorrupted by other economic and political and cultural interests except to be part of the purok, the place, the pagilian, the home country.

For veritably what happened last Saturday, the 24th of February, was celebration in its most communal form, with boisterous laugher and merriment gaily mixed with some sense of the formality of a cultural program that saw an extravaganza of performances that hinted not only variety but the dynamic richness of a national culture that is a product of the many cultures of the country, including the cultures that the immigrant peoples of the Philippines would become part of, such as the living Polynesian and Hawaiian cultures in these parts.

While there is something nostalgic in events like this, the nostalgia is more of an epistemology of the heart and mind—some sense of a window through which the immigrant peoples of the Philippines can get to have a reading and an understanding of themselves even as they try to become part of the new demographics that include them as Asian Americans—or more specifically Filipino Americans—without the hyphen.

With the various communities and organizations coming together, we can only gather in prayer and thanksgiving—in an ugayam, in an araraw—hopeful that in the years to come, this Fiesta Ilokano and Amianan can get to become the model for other forms of coming together of all peoples of the Philippines, a coming together that is celebratory because joyful, and joyful because it is birthed by a moral remembering of where we Filipino Americans come from and where we are going.

The first time I saw how a bread is brokenI died. Broken into piecesand then lived againto tell this poem.

It was a scene that toremy heart. Bits and pieces,like morsels to feeda hungering soul.The revolutionfor the first time, in 86, in that roadabout all the saints congregatingand telling us of epiphanies whose stories we cannot tellhow they begin--thatwas where it happened,this miracle of the slices.

We were all famished, furious, fiery.Days counted us with our fears,in that road and in some otherswe could gather our wits,or courage or what was left of itby the dictators of our young days.Nights counted us on the streets,sweat on our raging shirts,our angry bodies,our dream of morrowssnatched for decades.

We knew only the lies.And the bread was nowhere to be found.Nor the rice, nor the substitutesto fake loves.None of these was ever on altarsof democracy they promised us.Like many of the fighters,they went missing in action,the right course.

But today, on this Wednesday of ashes,I remember that breaking of bread:two hungry men on that street of our revoltinghalving the only bread left.

Like steps on journey you knowwell, the feet steady on the earthwere the ashes come.

You rush to the templeof that desiring, the peoplerushing as well to take in all the ashesall the ashes can bring to dampenwhich joy you have kept all these yearsof not having gone throughthe same, by force of habitor by force of running awayfrom the mirage of faithgoing awry sometimesas you, exile of the earthexile of a nationexile of yourselfdivine the doors to salvationin mornings when life is direand the straits are dire as well.

But you learn to pray,utter the silences the praying heart knows. You hope for your soulgetting some kind of a quick reliefas you summon the Hebrew you knowto call out to the lord of your lost years.

The tests do come in this exileyou want to turn backand start from where you endedlike the so be it in the beginningbut cannot start to do so.

You remember to bowyour head in benedictionas if all days come to an endand there you are, readybut not prepared to leave it all,this life more sobecause you have just begunto feel the wind on your face,fierce and bitter and refreshing as well.

Even if the news on the national public radiomakes you lose your appetite for coffeeto perk up your day: another writer in GenSan is dead,the first in this year of the color redwhen blessings are for real.

You queue up for the burnedfronds the priest has kept from last year'sentry to Jerusalem, the hosannahsringing still on the immaculate walls,cleaned for this lent of fastingand sacrifice, or so the deacon tells.

You do not hear what the habited of God said. The voices come from some other places you do not know.

In celebration of the National Arts Month of the Philippines held each February, the Ilokano and Philippine Drama and Film Program of the University of Hawai`i at Manoa joins hands with the Philippine Consulate General in Honolulu in holding the Fiesta Ilokana and Amianan 2007.

The Fiesta, to be held at the Philippine Consulate General on Pali Highway, Honolulu on February 24, from 9:00 AM to 4:00 PM, hopes to celebrate and showcase the artistic and cultural practices and achievements of Filipinos in the Philippines and in Hawai`i particularly those Filipinos sharing a common heritage in Northwestern Luzon such as the Ilokanos, the peoples of the Cordilleras, and the peoples of the Cagayan Valley.

The Fiesta will have two parts: a creative writing workshop in the morning, 9:00 AM-12 PM.

Dubbed “Kur-itan Kontra Kanser ken Kinaranggas iti Taeng—Writing Up to Write Off Cancer and Domestic Violence: Creative Writing in Ilokano and in English Translation”, the workshop will be directed and facilitated by Dr. Aurelio Agcaoili, a multi-awarded Ilokano writer writing in Ilokano, Tagalog/Filipino, and English.

The writing workshop—also known as KKKK Creative Writing Project—has been designed for all members of the community who would like to hone their writing skills and become aware of the issues surrounding community health such as cancer and domestic violence. The writing exercises will zero in on these issues as take-off points for poetic and stylized writing.

The cultural showcase, dramatic performance, and cultural exhibit will be held in the afternoon.

Material cultural artifacts from the Ilokos, the Cordilleras, and the Cagayan Valley will be on display for participants to gain insight into the complex cultures of Amianan or Northwestern Luzon.

Poets, writers, dramatists, and other performance artists will showcase their work. Dances highlighting the indigenous and the immigrant cultures of the Ilokanos and the peoples of Amianan will form part of the cultural program.

Also part of the program is a demonstration of the healing arts and other health care practices of the Ilokanos and the peoples of Amianan by Virgil Apostol, a renowned mangngablon from Los Angeles, California and who traces his healing heritage and gifts from the Ilocos.

Other organizations such as the GUMIL Hawai`i, the Philippine Studies Program of the University of Hawai`i-Leeward Community College, and Annak ti Kailokuan ti America have signed in to take part and co-sponsor this arts and creative writing festival. Overall coordination work for the whole day Fiesta is by the Timpuyog: Ilokano Student Association of the University of Hawai`i at Manoa.

Individuals who have signed up to take part in the Fiesta are former representative Jun Abinsay; Prof. Precy Espiritu, Lydia Abajo, and Amalia Bueno of the Pukengkeng Liberation Group; Amado Yoro, one of Hawai`i’s foremost Ilokano poets; Abe-Nile-Nagel Flores dancers; the Ilokano Program faculty; and the Timpuyog Choir. Clem Montero and Julius Soria, both faculty members of the UH Manoa Ilokano Program, will emcee the cultural program.

Cultural workers, artists, and members of the various cultural and civic organizations who are interested to take part in this gathering as performers or as sponsors are asked to contact Dr. Aurelio Agcaoili, Ilokano Program, University of Hawai`i, 956-8405; Consul Arlene Macaisa or Ms. Mod Villalobos, Philippine Consulate, 595-6316 extension 230 and 242, respectively.