Tuesday, November 1, 2016

I Don't Think I Can Put Up With This Anymore - Update Nov 2016

Problems mount from left and right for me. I'm stuck. My family sees me as a hopeless idiot. My Youtube hasn't made any real progress. Health Insurance, mental and physical health. Etc. None of it is good. Add icing on the cake that this is the absolute worst time of the year for me.

I guess I'm just destined for failure. I bend over backwards to meet the needs of people that are never satisfied. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm absolutely lost as to what to do. I only hide it so that no one tries to take over and utterly control my life. All the while fighting off suicidal and violent urges.

I don't know what my viewers want, they don't talk. Outside a very select few. None of them talk. Unless I say something they don't like. What am I supposed to do?

I'm still battling with myself. Truth be told I grew to hate people. I never want to be around them. Too many things have happened to me to make this way. Constantly battling haunting memories of my past. I wish I had gone insane. At least then I could be happy. I try not to blame other people for my issues. But its not very successful.

I can't put up with this. I'm at my breaking point. Why am I still on Youtube? Why am I still here? I should just wipe the slate clean. Delete my accounts and start a new life. I'm tired. No one has faith in me. I want to die.

Games

Well I'm done with my bitching. Here's the games.

Skylanders: Imaginators - Probably beat it in a week or so depending on how I feel.