Annie: Woman keeps trying to take what doesn't belong to her

DEAR ANNIE: Six months ago, I was fired for stealing from my job. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone, so I lied — to my parents, my friends, everybody. I told them I quit so I could go back to school.

Then I lost my house because I didn’t have the money to pay the mortgage. My parents told me that I’m almost 40 and need to stand on my own two feet. They wouldn’t let me move in with them. My best friend felt sorry for me and said I could camp out in her guest room until I got back on my feet.

In that time, I’ve fallen in love with her husband. I couldn’t help it. “Alex” is amazing — smart, charming, kind, athletic, attractive, the total package. But it makes me uncomfortable to see him being so affectionate with his wife, always holding her hand and stroking her hair. I can’t figure out why their marriage has lasted 10 years. He’s outgoing, and she’s shy. She’s also rather plain. Alex doesn’t seem to realize that he could have somebody so much better looking and smarter. He could have me.

I know his wife took me in when nobody else would, but you can’t help who God tells you to love. My mother says I need therapy. I don’t agree. I simply want to know how to deal with my feelings so I can be around my friend without wanting to smack that sweet smile right off her face. Any advice? — Crazy in Love

You steal from your job, lie to your family and then try to seduce your best friend’s husband. Alex is smart enough to know a good woman when he marries one. The longer you stay in that house the harder it will be for you. Get any job, maybe two of them, so you can afford another place to live, even if it means multiple roommates. Then take your mother’s advice and get some counseling to understand why you keep trying to take things that don’t belong to you.

DEAR ANNIE: Next fall, my boyfriend and I will be abroad at the same time. “Dex” will have graduated college. I will be a junior, studying in Europe for six months. He will be in Japan for twice that time.

My father recently told me about having a failed long-distance relationship while he was in the armed forces, saying, “You know, when you go abroad, that will probably be the end for the two of you. Just enjoy it while you can.”

Dex and I are already in a long-distance relationship (about five hours from each other). He knows it will be difficult but says he’s willing to wait for me, and we will discuss living together when he returns. What should I do? I know I’ll enjoy Europe to the fullest, but I’m afraid I’ll be so lonely. — Student Abroad

Your father’s failed relationship has nothing to do with yours. Yes, sometimes distance can create insurmountable barriers. If you are afraid you cannot be without a man in your life for a year, then you aren’t ready to commit to Dex, and we suggest you go your separate ways now. That’s an OK decision to make, and you shouldn’t feel guilty. But if you are determined to stay with Dex, friends (not boyfriends) can alleviate your loneliness.