Thoughts and observations by English poet Roger N. Taber, a retired librarian & poet-novelist.- "Colour, creed, sex, sexuality... these are but part of a whole. It is the whole that counts." RNT [NB While I have no wish to create a social network, I will always reply to emails. Contact: rogertab@aol.com].

Monday, 1 September 2014

Ego in Denial

A loud, talkative businessman attached
himself to me during an overnight stay at a hotel years ago, and offered me
this advice over countless pints of lager: ‘In business, you have to aim high,
be a real go-getter, stay focused on what you want and go for it, no matter
what…or who. And shall I tell you what’s so great about life at the top, young
man? It’s that you don’t need anyone, but everyone needs you. Believe me,
there’s no feeling can match it...’

Regarding the latter point, I believed
him although, needless to say, I was no more impressed then than I would be
now, some 30+ years on.

This poem is a villanelle.

EGO IN DENIAL

Don’t need anyone needing me,

the best way to get by;

(Loneliness, feeding on me….)

Voices cruelly, mockingly,

demanding, why…?

(Don’t need anyone needing me)

Choices, always goading me

to expose a white lie,

(loneliness, feeding on me…)

No one can stop me running free,

though a sandman try;

(Don’t need anyone needing me)

Scathing home truths would see

I get real, brave up, deny

loneliness feeding on me…

Love, it’s a life-and-death poetry

milking rhyme and reason dry;

(Don’t need anyone needing me)

Loneliness, feeding on me…

Copyright R. N. Taber 2005;
2014

[Note: First published as The
Hungry HeartinA Feeling for
the Quickness of Time by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2005.]

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About Me

A gay man. Born in Gillingham, Kent (UK) Dec. 21st 1945. Graduated with BA Hons.(Class 2/1) in English & American Literature, the University of Kent in Canterbury, summer 1973.

Some 700+ poems have appeared in poetry publications worldwide since 1993, excluding any that only appear in my collections.

Better known as a poet, my first novel - 'Blasphemy' was published in the USA, October 2006 ; it is Book 1 of a planned trilogy and was also distributed in the UK & the rest of Europe. Book 2 - 'Sacrilege' -was self-published and only on sale in the UK or on the Internet. [Book 3 - 'Redemption' - has been delayed due to illness. (I have prostate cancer.) Other novels have not yet found an agent/ publisher but are serialised on my fiction site.