I did my ten minutes of kneeling last night and crawled straight into bed and fell asleep. I just finished my morning kneeling as well. I feel wider awake today, hopefully this will remain so for I have let things slide which I need to catch up on today.

Yesterday was a mixture of dozing off and on all day and one errand out for my daughter to pick up a birthday present she needed for a party she will go to today. By evening I seemed to feel wider awake and able to keep my eyes open. This was good and was able to hold a short conversation with my Sir before he needed to be off to bed.

In the gifts my daughter picked up a small 3D puzzle. For herself she chose a cat which actually is a momma cat and a baby cat. She was able to put the baby cat together without any problems however the momma cat became more troublesome for her and by the end of the evening we were both working on it. It is a challenge for both of us but together we made some progress but had to put it aside as it became late and I insisted on us both going to bed. This morning she is continuing it by herself.

This morning I put together my schedule for next week and sent it to my Sir. And now I need to go work on the things I have let slide over the past couple of days. And make decisions on regarding what I’ll make for dinner that will serve as well for a few of my daughter’s lunches next week. She has one more month of school then she will be out for the summer for two months. I look forward to the break of not having to get up and make her lunches each morning however time for myself during the summer becomes more limited.

My Sir asked me how I was doing in regards to the additional rules. I’m actually feeling quite good about them. The thought of cutting my hair to suit a style he likes which is also something I like, and dressing to please him is all very appealing. He has also limited me to one orgasm a day and if I desire more I need to ask his permission. I am to use my ben wa balls at least once a week for a couple hours. I have been meaning to use them more often and his rule just gives me the added incentive to do just that.

Sometimes this is what I need. I have found if I should be doing something that is just for me, I generally do not have the discipline to follow through. I focus on what others need more than I do on what I need for myself and in doing so the things I need to do for myself tend to get left undone. Knowing that I now do it to please him gives me more purpose, more incentive and a reason other than me needing to do it for me.

I wonder at times if other submissives are this way, if they tend to ignore their own needs over the needs of others.