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Wednesday, 20 January 2016

Sometimes? You Just Gotta Get Sh*t Done.

I am an over thinker. I am also my own worst critic and worry about ridiculous things I am fairly certain other people don't ("is it posher to cut my kids sandwiches into triangles? Will square sandwiches make them less posh" yep I am insane). I have talked before about how the morning rush to get my daughter to school on time really sets me on edge. Sometimes? I wake up gasping for air with the anxiety of what the next few hours will hold. My kids are well behaved. My husband is helpful. Yet? The mornings I am not at work I start to worry about what's going to happen before it's even started.

And I finally think I have figured out what the issue is. I feel that each and every moment with my children should be precious. That I should be trying to spend quality time with them AT ALL TIMES. I should be reading. Or sitting down and having a cuddle. Or just generally being super Mum. So the two hours before school are two hours where I am trying to make breakfast, wash up, get two wriggly humans dressed, wipe bums, clean potty's, put the dryer on, feed pets and also give my kids 100% of my focus, attention and pure love...

The Hulk and a whoopee cushion? Not strictly needed on the school run

...however? THIS CANNOT BE DONE! It just can't. My anxiety of waking up knowing that all this had to happen as well as me having in depth conversations about Mr Potato Head and getting the play doh out was, and I am being totally honest, turning me into a ranty maniac. Shouty Mum was often rearing her head and generally one or all three of us were weeping. So I did what every Mum does and a) not talk to anyone about it and slowly go mad and then b) finally be brave enough to ask other people about their morning routines and it transpires?

They do exactly the same as me but without the crazy "this is supposed to be the best time of our lives!" element. They wash up, they get the kids dressed, they do their hair and they? Just get sh*t done. Nothing more than that. Just live normal life. Just get from a to b with the minimal amount of fuss. High fiving themselves if everyone is clean, fed and happy. Simple as that. And it is as this point I breathed a sigh of relief.

Hide and seek? May be best left after 3:30pm

It's OK sometimes to put the vacuum around and say "I can't read at the moment as I just need to put the washing on bab". There is no guilt to be felt when you are drying your hair and for five minutes you can't play tea parties. It's alright to be exhausted after a days work and suggest "shall we just watch TV for a bit and not build giant castles out of plasticine?".

As that is normal life. That is routine. That is what happens around the other amazing times when we are running across beaches, or sledging down snowy hills. It's the bits in between trips to the park and laughing whilst eating ice cream. It's the plain crap and boring bits that makes the other bits shine so brightly. It's going to take baby steps but I really am going to try hard and smash this. I am going to try and wake up and think "this is all going to get done". And hopefully stupid shouty Mum will only rear her ugly head when my daughter bonks my son on the head with an Elsa doll or someone jumps off the couch Spiderman style.

7 comments:

I had couch jumping this morning. To be honest, it's a rare day I don't have it so I now overlook it for the sake of my sanity. Yes, yes, as per our chat, mornings are just for getting stuff done, they are absolutely not about precious quality time or you may go totally insane! The kids can entertain themselves, you get through that to-do list to make sure you all leave the house on time. Go for it xx

I verge on crazy dragon mum in the mornings. I just worry we're always going to be late so I end up on edge all the time. Plus z gets distracted by shiny things in about 2 milliseconds so putting uniform and shoes on can take forever!!!! Mornings really are for just getting stuff done here x

Bless you! I can't believe you've been trying to be perfect, happy mum while trying to get the kids out of the house! There's so much to do in the morning, it's just not possible to be a lovely happy mum too! I've always just focused on getting stuff done and getting out of the house (preferably without too much shouting, but that's not always guaranteed!). I can be nice later in the day when there's time for it! x

My goodness Em, you're super mum! But we aren't meant to be. You're the perfect mum for your kiddies and they clearly adore you. Children need to learn that we aren't at their beck and call all day long. I think it's an important aspect of growing up. One day the world will teach them that lesson and in a much harsher way. Be there for them yes, but also help them to understand that is not 24/7. Otherwise you'll not only go mad but live in a shit tip! x x