POSITIVE SELF-TALK ・THAT CONVERSATION YOU HAVE WITH YOURSELF

“If I am not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?”

Maya Angelou

We all do it, talk to ourselves.

Out loud or in our heads, we’re constantly in a conversation with our inner critic and/or bestfriend. Sometimes, we’re marvelous and channelling light from all angles, while other times we’re hopeless, not good enough or not enough. Our inner dialogue determines how we conquer our day and deal with conflict and the world around us. If you’re in a “why me” victim mindset, chances are a lot higher that you will always see the world as being against you and focus on everything you believe you’re lacking as opposed to practising gratitude. A mindset that allows us to see opportunities instead of obstacles will always persevere and enrich us in the long run.

Positive self-talk is the conversation that goes on in your head. It determines who you believe you are in that very moment. Who we believe we are on the inside, the world around us will accept. People who believe they will achieve success and envision their rise, often do. Those with a poorer outlook remain submerged in their own self doubt and negative bubble. This inner chatter and self awareness is what separates those who are winning, to those left behind.

You are Amazing.Fantastic.Talented.Worthy.

Don’t feel it? Don’t look it? It doesn’t matter.

Positive affirmations about yourself go a long way on the road to a stronger well being. Everybody has crap days, that’s why we are blessed with a tomorrow. You should wake up each morning knowing that you are capable of achieving anything you desire, even if you woke up on the ‘wrong side of the bed.’

While it is quite easy to slip into old bad habits and negative thought patterns, take a step back and remind yourself these sneaky forms of procrastination do not allow you to move forward, toward your better self. Nobody and nothing can break your stride unless you allow them to. That’s a bit of stoic philosophy for you.

Ever wondered how certain people don’t let petty things get to them? These are people who choose their battles wisely within themselves and those around them because they don’t allow their stronger sense of self to be compromised by things that are not aligned with who they are and what they believe.

“I can’t” vs. “I can”

Henry Ford was right when he said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.” I’m certain you’d rather kick your goals, than kick yourself for not even attempting after life has passed you by.

Imagine turning 80, looking back at your life and spending your last years alive living in regret?

If you’re discontentedly sitting in a state of inertia, ask yourself what is really holding you back. What are you afraid of? People who practice positive self talk refuse to see the obstacles before any journey. They acknowledge they are there but are devising a way to make it happen. While those convincing themselves they can’t do something, end up doing nothing and never move forward.

We all want to be happy, fruitful and prosperous but with this comes a lot of hard work and effort. When you find yourself in a position where you can either sink or swim, find the way to swim because even by trying, you’re already ahead. Trust the process, if you strongly believe you’re destined for something greater than what you’re experiencing now, keep getting up and try again. One of these days, the door will eventually open.

Find the Positive in the Negative

Is the glass half full or half empty? Our interpretation of what we see and what happens to us leaves an impressionable mark on our self awareness. There is a lesson to learn from every setback, preparing you for the next round. Positive self talkers are wired to see the best in people and situations. They too, are faced with challenges but a positive outlook loosens the chains of negativity and keeps them moving forward.

In an idealistic world, negativity would be abolished but without the tough times and dark holes, how are we to determine the value of the good times when they arrive?

What is your unhappiness trying to tell you?

“A positive outlook loosens the chains of negativity and keeps them moving forward.”

You are who you hang out with

Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Take a look around you, who do you drink with? Who inspires you? Do they believe in you? What exactly do you talk about? Do they bring out the best in you or are you left pondering in self doubt and pity?

Life is not a competition about who has a better job, degree or income. Good people are able to connect and devote altruistic ventures to absolutely anyone they meet. They also know when it’s time to close the door on those that are a compromise to their values. They inspire your better self to shine in the light by taking a risk and following your dreams. People that hold you back are a distraction to your soul and personal development.

Negative people are just as contagious as negative thoughts, they will make you sick over time. You probably won’t even notice but this is a distraction your inner self will not appreciate. If you’re around people who judge, gossip, struggle with addictions and plague your thoughts in the wrong places, you’re wasting time and time is our most precious gift of all.

Be wise enough to know when to walk away from those who no longer feed your soul.

GRATITUDE

You’ve heard me harp on about it, every self-help guru on the planet places large emphasis on it, even Gary Vaynerchuk has devoted videos to this one word and most pivotal part of our personal development, gratitude. Gratitude is being grateful for the gift of being alive and every aspect of what you already do have.

Gratitude and positive self talk go hand in hand because as you are focusing on all the positive aspects about yourself and life, you’re also giving thanks to it all. When we focus on the good in ourselves and live, we leave no time and space for our limitations.

I hate how many people think, “glass half-empty” when their glass is really four-fifths full. I’m grateful when I have one drop in the glass because I know exactly what to do with it.” Gary Vaynerchuk