I developed religious OCD during my teen years, but I went for the next 11 years without a diagnosis or help of any kind.

I constantly sought reassurance from spiritual mentors, completed my devotional activities with anxious precision, and drowned in constant rumination. What should have been the best time of my life — college days — were eaten up by overanalyzing intrusive thoughts.

Was it God’s voice or my voice telling me to walk left around the cafeteria instead of right? Maybe it’s a test of faith. I feel like something bad will happen to me if I don’t go left. I better go left.

I never told anybody about my symptoms. I thought every true disciple of Christ had these emotional struggles. Doesn’t the Bible say to work out our salvation with “fear and trembling?”

But after 11 years, my emotions couldn’t handle it any longer. I plunged into depression.

It was while seeking treatment for major depressive disorder that I finally was diagnosed with religious OCD — aka “scrupulosity.” During the road to recovery, it hit me like a slap in the face…

Overcoming scrupulosity isn’t a matter of finding better answers.

It isn’t about squashing our doubts.

It doesn’t involve better apologetics or stronger reassurance.

And it doesn’t involve forcibly preventing anxious thoughts.

I realized that the way to beat scrupulosity is a return to the REAL meaning of faith.

You see, us obsessives are addicted to certainty. We crave absolute knowledge about the things that bother us the most, and we get trapped in a cycle of trying to “know for sure.”

Other obsessive-compulsives check the oven over and over again for absolute certainty that it’s really off. But us? We check our hearts and our spiritual experience over and over again, scanning for sin or religious deficit.

And guess what?

Faith only exists in a context of uncertainty. That’s why the gateway to beating scrupulosity involves admitting that we will always have doubts and uncertainties…

…that often, God does not take away biological predispositions to mental health illnesses…

…but that despite all this, we can train ourselves to lift the mighty hand of faith heavenward to cling to the promises of God.

The way forward with scrupulosity involves:

Recognizing religious OCD as a real mental health condition, not a spiritual problem.

Redefining “faith” in the context of a mental health disorder that tries to keep us in a constant state of uncertainty.

Creating new, Biblical understandings of the character of God and the nature of salvation.

After several years of offering informal support to fellow sufferers of scrupulosity and receiving very positive responses, I decided to take the next step in supporting the scrupulosity community. That’s when I started this blog and the accompanying YouTube channel to discuss strategic ways to move beyond religious OCD.

Believe me when I say that no matter how you feel, you can beat this thing!

Even if you’re twisted into an anxious ball of knots and strung out on YouTube sermons (don’t worry, I’ve been there too), you can definitely do this.

Tell yourself, “I’m ready to do this.” 🙋🏼‍♀️

Ready to say goodbye to religious OCD? Here’s what to do next:

Book your first consultation at a time that’s easy and convenient for you.

We’ll set up a Zoom meeting to talk about your symptoms, goals, and potential solutions. I’ll tell you more about my 3-month and 6-month discounted coaching packages and then we’ll roll up our sleeves and get started!