The badass apotheosis Test

Go

47% aliveness, 47% benevolence, 67% intellectualism

You are Go, the ancient Asian strategy game. Simultaneously simpler and more complex than chess, you have captivated some truly brilliant minds and destroyed more than a few lives. A simple interplay of black and white pieces, shifting over time and across an enormous field, only the finest intellect can grasp your intricacies. Deep Blue is nothing against you.

All possible test results

Graaah! Aaaargh! You are the Zombie! You once lived, spoke, and loved, but now you stalk the earth, terrifying the living. You exist only to devour brains. Sweet, delicious brains.
You are u... Read more

You are hacking! You grasp the austere, beautiful mathematical relationships behind things. Whatever you need to achieve in life, you translate it into the realm of the computer and perform the operat... Read more

You are Go, the ancient Asian strategy game. Simultaneously simpler and more complex than chess, you have captivated some truly brilliant minds and destroyed more than a few lives. A simple interplay ... Read more

You are cannabis!
Okay, you are Weed. Not everyone can relate to you responsibly, and you have a bit of a bad reputation. But your main function in the world is to help folks have a nice tim... Read more

You are Homebrewing! You allow people to make beer, wine, or (heaven help us) mead, watching the transformation all the way from gross plant matter to delicious beverages. Through you, drinking is ele... Read more

You are Co-ops! You offer people an opportunity to shop, work, and live while maintaining ethical standards and human relationships. Rather than providing a service and spiriting your profits away to ... Read more

You are the Pirate! Yo ho ho, a freebooting life of wild adventure, never a care in the world. Plunder a galleon loaded with treasure, and zip away before the lumbering barges of the navy even know yo... Read more

You are the acclaimed television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer! Emotionally complex, humorous, and totally engaging, you bring your viewers back to the passion of youth -- except this time, their va... Read more

You are Evolutionary Psychology! You are the discipline that studies human psychology from the perspective of evolutionary change and adaptation. By assuming that the human brain evolved to solve pers... Read more

You are the adorable Bonobo! You're a diminutive chimpanzee who eats fruit, forms peaceful coalitions, and has absolutely unbelievable amounts of sex. Bonobo troops resolve tension through group sex, ... Read more

You are The Internet. For those reading this, you require no introduction. You bring us everything from e-mail to the encyclopedia, from content management for distributed activist communities to tran... Read more

You are Love Itself. This test needed a summum bonum, the highest, self-justifying good, and you are it. You are what allows the artist to put themselves into creation and the scientist to dive... Read more