DJ gives wedding planning advice to men in new CD

Dave Soldinger started the blog Temple of Groom, offering advice to men on wedding planning. Courtesy photo.

Wedding tips for men

Set your budget when you become engaged

“First, figure out how much money you can realistically afford to spend on your wedding. This does not mean that you should skimp on anything, just that you should decide on a maximum dollar amount and how flexible you’re willing to be.”

— Geoff Maddox

Don’t be fooled by the “flashy”

This happens when people hire vendors based on first impressions like nice websites, fancy offices or expensive showrooms.

“Simply because someone spends a lot of money on their first impression does not necessarily mean that the final product will be equally as impressive.”

— Geoff Maddox

Pick your battles

“Think about the things you really care about and let those be known. Pick your battles like maybe what kind of beers, or the music.”

- Dave Soldinger

With wedding season here and continuing well into November, brides and wedding planners are picking colors, sending invites and discussing every little detail that goes into the hopefully once-in-a-lifetime event. It tends to be a stressful process, and an expensive one.

The bulk of the planning is generally still done by the bride, but it doesn’t have to be.

Long Beach resident Geoff Maddox is an experienced wedding DJ who often finds himself fully involved in the planning process with his clients. Now he’s offering up the valuable lessons he’s learned to help men navigate the planning that goes into that walk down the aisle.

“I’ve worked with lots and lots of clients and in early 2011 I started blogging, basically answering the questions that grooms were asking,” said Maddox, whose blog led to the new CD “Wedding Planning Explained: A Guy’s Take on How to Save Money, Who to Hire and How to Simplify the Wedding Planning Process.”

The new CD is broken down into 10 short chapters that get to the point when it comes to answering things like how to pick the right vendors, the importance of reading contracts and even warnings about not getting “fooled by the flashy.”

“Grooms always want to cut to the chase; what’s it going to cost? How do I know you’re the right vendor? Who’s going to try and rip me off?” he said, explaining the reasons behind the CD.

And those are important questions to ask since, next to buying a new house or for some supporting their kids through college, weddings can be among the most costly expenditures a couple can make. According to a survey released jointly in March 2013 by WeddingChannel.com and TheKnot.com, the average wedding budget in the L.A. area is $35,308 — much higher than the national average of $28,427.

So it’s no surprise that Maddox gets to the money aspect right away when offering his advice on choosing the right vendors and to look out for “the take away.”

“The main thing you want in a vendor, a videographer, DJ or florist, or whomever, you want someone that is going to sit down with you and try and work within your budget,” he said.

The “take away,” he says in the CD, is an old sales tactic that can be used by vendors — for example, when a client is told that the DJ has another potential client ready to sign a contract if they don’t sign right away.

Advertisement

“This not only adds additional stress to the existing anxiety of planning a wedding or event, but also is an indication that a DJ, in this example, is probably more interested in the money they will make off of the client than insuring that the client has a positive and pain-free experience,” Maddox says on the CD.

While some of this advice is readily available in wedding magazines or books, putting it on a CD will further encourage guys to get involved, since it’s as simple as pressing play and following the advice, he said.

Maddox wants to see more grooms like Van Nuys resident Dave Soldinger, who decided to become more involved in the planning of his 2010 wedding after a little disagreement with his bride over wedding colors.

“My wife picked out wedding colors and they were the colors of Pittsburgh Steelers, and I hate the Pittsburgh Steelers,” Soldinger said.

So with that motivation he became heavily involved in their wedding planning, so much so he soon started a blog called Temple of Groom aimed at men who want to get into the planning process. He also penned a few columns for a wedding magazine and even toyed with the idea of becoming a wedding planner.

“There’s a misconception that guys don’t want to help. Lately I feel that guys are realizing it’s their day, too,” said Soldinger, who liked the idea of Maddox’s CD answering the questions men may have.

Professional wedding coordinator Carol Rosen, who has been putting events together for about 30 years and has worked with Maddox in the past, thinks it’s a great idea to offer his experience in a CD.

She also offers some advice of her own when it comes to guys who want to be involved with the plans.

She says guys tend to be more analytical when it comes to planning and want to cut to the chase and figure out how much things are going to cost, so she thinks it’s a good idea for the grooms to help take care of things like the music, finding the hotel where guests will stay or how the groomsmen will stand and what they’ll do.

But there’s one thing grooms can do above all else.

“The first piece of advice is support your bride,” she said, despite the way modern men like Soldinger may be feeling. “The bottom line is, it’s the bride’s day.”

About the Author

Richard Guzman covers Arts and Entertainment for the Long Beach Press-Telegram, where he writes about art, theater, music and food. He is a graduate of CSU Northridge with a degree in journalism. Richard grew up in Los Angeles and has written about food, pop culture and art in the area. He has two young children and in his spare time enjoys riding his motorcycle and hiking. Reach the author at Richard.Guzman@presstelegram.com
or follow Richard on Twitter: @Richword.