Brazil:

Economy: Well that's the point, obviously. According to the Centre for Economics and Business Research (CEBR), Brazil has now overtaken the UK as the world's sixth largest economy. Despite growing at a mere 3.5% last year (against 7.5% over the previous few years) the Latin American powerhouse has seen its GDP reach a record £1.6tn. And it's not about to hit the buffers any time soon.

Population: Partly explains the above. As well as being the world's sixth largest economy, Brazil is also the world's sixth most populous country. It has around 200 million people and is (another plus) overwhelmingly young: some 62% of Brazilians are under 29 years of age. The country also has the the largest number of people of Japanese descent outside Japan. Although that's probably not relevant.

Football: Now we're getting to it. As they say in Brazil: "Os ingleses o inventaram, os brasileiros o aperfeiçoaram" ("The English invented it, the Brazilians perfected it"). The most successful national football team in the history of the Fifa World Cup, Brazil are the only national team to have played in every World Cup finals and have lifted the trophy a record five times

Beaches: The Brazilian equivalent of "just my cup of tea" is apparently "é minha praia" ("That's my beach"); that's two different cultures for you. More than 8,000 miles of glorious coastline and a host of cultural icons: The Girl from Ipanema, Copacabana, Havaianas flip-flops, unfeasibly small bikinis, eponymous waxings ...

Tropical rainforest: Loads of it (and disappearing slightly less fast than before).

Exotic indigenous peoples: The national Indian foundation Funai has confirmed the presence of 67 different uncontacted tribes in Brazil.

UK:

Economy: Not so hot. In economist-speak, the politest way to put it is that Britain's recovery "failed to gain any traction in 2011". The latest figures suggest the UK economy grew by a lousy 0.9% for the full year, having actually gone into reverse by 0.2% at the end of the year. The gloomier forecasts for this year predict a further 1% shrinkage. Go Blighty!

Population: Well, we're trying. Britain's population is growing at its fastest rate in almost half a century, but it's still barely a third the size of Brazil's. According to the Office for National Statistics, 62.3 million people were living in Britain in 2010, around 0.8% more than the previous year.

Football: We (at least, the English) drew up the first set of modern rules for the Beautiful Game. We boast the world's oldest association football club (Sheffield FC), the first national team (with Scotland), the first national league and the first knockout cup. Other than that, we apparently won the World Cup, once, a long time ago. Since then the best we've done is fourth.

Beaches: Nearly 8,000 miles of glorious coastline (thanks mainly to the islands) and a host of cultural icons: fish'n'chips, saucy postcards, windbreaks, soggy one-pieces ... What's not to love?

Tropical rainforest: Er, the Eden project.

Exotic indigenous peoples: Have you seen the streets of Newcastle on a Saturday night?