Because the one thing scarier than the spooky-sloppy makeup job that most evil clowns have is this clown's red eye shadow, which looks to have come from a deep gash through his left brow. And we petitioned to be given a few extra vowels just so we could express how badly the scraggly, sharpened teeth freaked us out, but we were met with nothing but silence. And then, from right behind us, we heard muffled, deranged laughter.