July 14, 2007

Not me. You know what I think. But here's some expert opinion, approving, but setting stern limits:

I am so tired of the enormous, giant, and baggy cargo shorts from seemingly every American mall brand...

I'm still trying to find a shorter short that seems right for me.

Check the pictures. Do you look like these guys? They're all slim and tan. But the second picture? The one in the Converse sneakers? That exemplifies the biggest problem with a man in shorts: He looks like a large child. And not in cute, boyish way. In a "I'm standing around waiting for my mommy" way.

I don't know where the sartorialist lives, but if it's Manhattan, as I suspect from some of the other pix on his blog, there are all manner of stores that sell men's shorts that are not baggy.

A clue to the statistically illiterate: shop in stores located in zip codes for which the per capita income exceeds the average per capita income in Manhattan. Generally speaking there is an inverse relationship between wealth and ill-fitting clothes (that is to say: as people's income rises they shed the gangsta image.)

Bjorn Borg looked fantastic in tennis shorts. But then, the guy was an adonis.

Cargo shorts with their bulging pockets right at knee level are just wrong. They make the wearer look like a bowlegged drunken sailor listing first to one side, then the other, as he walks down the street.

As one who wears shorts from April to October I tend to wear styles like the first and last pictures. The other two are for people much younger than me.

As for cargo's I'm not a huge fan unless I'm going somewhere that has bag checks (and the long lines that go along with them) for entrance. Rather than a camera bag I'll use the cargo pockets for spare batteries, memory cards, etc and skip the lines.

As an older man (over 65) with five twenty-thirty something daughters who keep me supplied in casual clothes, I wear what they give me because their take on contemporary fashion is much better than mine. Cargo shorts are a big part of that wardrobe now. In Atlanta, you would be a fool to wear long trou when you do not have to do so.

I pick and buy all of my "business casual" clothes and have no shorts in that collection.

For "party casual" I have mostly slacks, but some tailored bermuda shorts wear polo shirts, short sleeved casual dress shirts and the like with them.

Does a full grown man give a damn what people think about him in his shorts? Despite the profanity, I am not being snarky. It is a legit question. I have such a horrible fashion sense (it comes from being dressed as little lord fauntleroy as a child) that I do not trust my own instincts. But I wonder, Ann, if your fashion hopes for men are wasted like a woman's romantic love for a gay man. It may burn strong, but it will remain unrequeited.

"I am so tired of the enormous, giant, and baggy cargo shorts from seemingly every American mall brand..."

Amen. And living in Madison, I can't shop below 125th St. (Ann, could you pick me up some shorts next semester?)

My take on capri pants: You couldn't afford to spring for the last few inches?

I agree with Trey. Within wide margins, I don't give a damn what other people think about shorts. If it's hot, I'm wearin' em. One limit is respect, of course. You don't wear shorts to a funeral, for example.

Does a full grown man give a damn what people think about him in his shorts?

Nope, not this one. Cargo shorts are excellent because of the side pockets -- a much more comfortable place to carry a wallet and phone (or mp3 player or camera or whatever) than back or front pockets. And, horrors, I've got a couple of pairs of cargo pants, too, for just the same reason.

Would I wear consider wearing shorter, tighter shorts to be more fashionable? Heh -- uh, no, not even for a minute.

I have to agree with all the guys from the south. When it's 90°F plus from March to October, pants should only worn when necessary. Until someone invents air conditioned pants, it's all shorts, all the time.

I guess there's something wrong with my sense of fashion, but I LOVE the look. Maybe it's a generational thing. I recently bought my hubby (who has a great physique) two pairs (khaki and camo green) of the big cargo shorts, and he looks superb in them when he pairs them with his sandals and even in tennis shoes with a polo shirt. I like for men to have a not-so-fitted look in casual wear. You don't have to look like a pencil if you're a guy -- and there's something about them looking comfortable and even a little neglectful of their appearance that I like about the everyday male. The ones that I am wary about are the ones who pay a little too MUCH attention to their silhouette and especially the ones who like their shorts...well, short, as in anywhere mid-thigh or shorter. eek! But, honestly, why should men be relegated to only long pants unless they are playing a sport? That's like putting a woman in a skirt all of the time. And I think that functionality should govern the style of clothing. Isn't this what women have finally freed themselves from? We get more liberated, and the men are now becoming more fashion-conscious. Maybe it's just a turning of the tables. Just some observations. ;)

yes, those of us working in the high rise offices down South pretty much stop going out to lunch during June, July and August. Luckily there's a cafe in the building. We have on our suits and coming back at 1:00 soaked in sweat is uncomfortable and unnattractive. Not that we could wear shorts anyway. :)

Poor Ann, locked into her tiny view of what's acceptable casual wear for men, and in a college town at that. I am a shorts wearer. I hate cargo shorts because they make my fine physique look lardish. I wear a UtiliKilt routinely. 'Nuff said.

Ann, ponder your sentiments in a different flavor: Women should only wear skirts, and only if they fall to the knee or lower. No exceptions.

Aw, everyone can have their opinions. Sometimes things just strike you as fashionably offensive...kind of like the seersucker suits we were talking about a couple of weeks ago. Probably as cool as shorts, but...ugh. For me, being a kind of Generation X-er, I think it would be the Sans-a-belt (sp?) pants, as well as the word "slacks." LOL My parents were born in the thirties, and I think that my dad is a generation that keeps away from shorts for men because it is reminiscent of knickers, which distinguished the men from the boys. It might be a generational thing.