World

The kid ruler of anthropomorphized enigma North Korea yet again defied logic with this Hail Mary from his nation’s defense department. Sources were quick to speculate why Kim Jong-un would invest 4.2 billion dollars into Mega Bloks: more toys for his playroom, to have a statue built in his image, build a subservient South Korea […] Read more

According to a leaked CIA internal memo, there’s only one thing that the middle-eastern terrorist group known as ISIS fears more than Allah’s disapproval– lower-middle-class, AM-radio-listening, outspokenly patriotic white men who pose with weapons in their Facebook photos. The memo detailed how ISIS is, as one senior analyst described, “shaken to their core” by what […] Read more

In an unprecedented response to the current Syrian refugee crisis, multiple DailyER foreign correspondents have confirmed that the European Union has closed all entrances to the continent of Europe, with no exceptions. Faced with an influx of refugees fleeing unimaginable horrors in Syria, conservative government officials in EU member states are heralding the border closing […] Read more

Mr. Worldwide himself, otherwise known as Pitbull, announced on Twitter that he was going to change his first name to “Featuring.” “After much help and support from my family, I’ve decided that I’m going to begin performing as Featuring Pitbull,” the rapper tweeted this morning. The Artist Formerly Known as Pitbull has been known for […] Read more

Last week’s meeting between President Barack Obama and Cuban President Raul Castro signified a historic step in the American-Cuban normalization process. No longer the Cold War communist state of Fidel, Cuba’s slow march to embracing capitalist business practices has rapidly accelerated in recent years. The fears of corporate American corruption have been quelled as Obama […] Read more

Call it a sloppy, jolly Christmas. Sources are reporting that Santa Claus was spotted red-cheeked after hiding a recently stuffed stocking the bottom of the laundry hamper at his home at the Northern Pole. “He really spread some holiday spirit,” an anonymous source told the Dailyer. “But we’re still a few weeks out from Christmas, […] Read more

Kids just seem to seem to be getting older and older every year, and with that comes more children. A study carried out by Studeaze, a study research company based out of Lincoln, found that 31 children have been born in the United States since January. “We really believe the information we gather at Sudeaze […] Read more

Following years of extensive research, the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) has named the planet Earth to be the most dangerous place for children. The report cited widespread war, dangerous living conditions and a rapidly deteriorating political and social climate as the primary reasons for the ultimate conclusion. “No child should be subject to the […] Read more

Spectators swooned with delight yesterday morning on Aldersgate Street after seeing what many claimed to be ‘absolutely adorable:’ An unidentified British man wielding a baton and dedicatedly playing pretend policeman. “It’s a little odd, sure, seeing an adult with a shoddy little stick, which is probably made out of plastic, goofing off and pretending to […] Read more