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So I am up for a job very important to me. Had 2 telephone interviews. Went in person this morning. NYC has over 8 million people. What are the chances that the guy who interviewed me in person is the guy I had sex with a few months ago? I can count on one hand how many people I have had sex with in the last couple of years. He was very professional but obviously recognized me and smiled a few times. All I was thinking was, is this guy ever going to hire someone that fucked him? Did I do a good job of nailing him? Did I land on the dismount? He was asking me all of these business related questions and all I could think of was this stuff. We shall see.....LOL. I was speechless.

So I am up for a job very important to me. Had 2 telephone interviews. Went in person this morning. NYC has over 8 million people. What are the chances that the guy who interviewed me in person is the guy I had sex with a few months ago? I can count on one hand how many people I have had sex with in the last couple of years. He was very professional but obviously recognized me and smiled a few times. All I was thinking was, is this guy ever going to hire someone that fucked him? Did I do a good job of nailing him? Did I land on the dismount? He was asking me all of these business related questions and all I could think of was this stuff. We shall see.....LOL. I was speechless.

Yes, it's an incredible coincidence, but coincidences happen. I would think that if you were composed and professional during the interview, and focused on the job and the business, it would make a big impression on him. Strange coincidences and awkward situations do happen occasionally in business, as well as your personal life, and sometimes they even overlap. This was an opportunity to show him how your handle yourself professionally in an unexpected situation. Hopefully you rose to the occasion (sorry, I couldn't resist the double-entendre).

As a manager in my company, I don't believe I am prevented from hiring anyone that I've had a relationship with in the past (sexual or otherwise). But I would disclose it to my manager first, just to be sure everything was out in the open.

Good Luck!

Henry

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"Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love." - Butch Hancock, Musician, The Flatlanders

I'm also wondering if you disclosed your HIV status to this man prior to having sex with him? If not, well, you really do have an awkward situation on your hands. If so, then I think your story highlights why disclosure up front can avoid messy situations later.

Regards,

Henry

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"Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me two things: One is that God loves you and you're going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth and you should save it for someone you love." - Butch Hancock, Musician, The Flatlanders

I'm also wondering if you disclosed your HIV status to this man prior to having sex with him? If not, well, you really do have an awkward situation on your hands. If so, then I think your story highlights why disclosure up front can avoid messy situations later.

Regards,

Henry

I hope the OP is not offended, but I did find this very humorous. I mean what are the odds? I am surprised that I haven't had this happen to me in some sort of way other than rounding the corner at the Y and bumping into someone who had their dick up my ass at one time or another. As Henry brought up, I really hope you disclosed otherwise a funny incident ends up not so funny. Sometimes we don't know how our "urge to merge" will end up.Good luck on the job interview!

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"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it." Nelson Mandela

Yes thankfully I did disclose. I remember it so well because he said that's what condoms were made for. If this were not so ridiculously funny I would probably be more worried about the job. I think I am still in shock. When I walked around the corner and saw his face I about died. On the inside I was like..hey I fucked you, hire me. On the outside of course all professional. Stuff like this NEVER happens to me. I lead a very boring life! But it will be a good story to tell I suppose.

lol what a small world!! do you really want this job? Is he the hiring manager aka the boss? If so, I would definitely look for other opportunities. Imagine once he becomes your boss, you will have so much in common, same job, same colleagues, same coffee break, same team dinner, oh you will use the same toilet...

Is he single? what if he wants more? what if he has a big mouth?

also once someone finds out, both of you will be deemed the office sluts...run! far far away!! hope the sex was good tho... :-)

Wow that is a very awkward situation! And a very rare one too! I hope you get the job man!

@GSO: Seinfeld episode! So true! I can see it now... To me it sounds like an Elaine story-line. LOL

Dan

Awkward is when you had sex with a co-worker, I have been to a lot of places before, but I have NEVER been there I did when I was in the NAVY, but we were on 2 different Ships, so he wasn't really someone I worked with, I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's like he worked @ another location

« Last Edit: March 22, 2011, 11:19:25 AM by denb45 »

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"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

lol what a small world!! do you really want this job? Is he the hiring manager aka the boss? If so, I would definitely look for other opportunities. Imagine once he becomes your boss, you will have so much in common, same job, same colleagues, same coffee break, same team dinner, oh you will use the same toilet...

Is he single? what if he wants more? what if he has a big mouth?

also once someone finds out, both of you will be deemed the office sluts...run! far far away!! hope the sex was good tho... :-)

Didn't you read the OP? He said the job is important to him and that they were both highly professional. Plus, you gotta give other professionals the benefit of the doubt that they handle themselves professionally too. All sorts of affairs go on in the workplace and it doesn't equate with being deemed office sluts as a net effect.

Neither of you acknowledged you knew each other biblically? Sounds like a Seinfeld episode.

Sounds like they both knew it and "didn't go there" and why would anyone, in such a highly professional and scripted kind of encounter.

Anyway, cause he smiled, my guess he's cool about it and the past won't hurt and might help. How was the sex anyway? And was he in HR or would he be an office colleague? I think him being in HR would be a small extra bonus in your favor because he would be even more professional.

« Last Edit: March 22, 2011, 03:54:33 PM by mecch »

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“From each, according to his ability; to each, according to his need” 1875 K Marx

Hope you get the job, sounds like there is already a connection. I had a situation like this, once I was diagnosed with HIV. I just found out and went to my initial appoint at the Immune Deficiency Clinic at the hospital where I was recommended to go. The nurse did all her stuff and than the social worker came in and yes, I had sex with him, a couple times in fact. Its been awhile and we definately knew and later after the interview of finding the place where I am, we talked about our meetings, and I now look forward to seeing him at my appointments. We both have significant others...not partners. He always talks to me both b4 and after my appointment, I am wondering if he does this to all the patients or just me. Maybe someday I will ask him.

Reminds me of when Jack McFarland was marrying Rosario in order for her to get a green card. They had to meet with immigration. The gov't worker interviewing them turned out be a trick Jack hooked up with. Those are all real people, right?

Well I guess my dick wasn't big enough. (Ha). I went in for a second interview and in addition they had me come in to work for a few hours (paid of course) to see how I worked. It's the kind of job that you have to prove your skills. Anyway the guy I "did" was pulling for me, the coworker I would have had really liked me a lot, but another person there was very challenging and I believe it was because of him I was not chosen. He grilled me about my resume saying things like, a bachelor degree means nothing to me (I graduated in December) and why do you have your GPA on your resume because A's mean nothing. I of course remained calm but mentioned that yes, good grades do not mean you will be great at your profession, however they do prove dedication and effort. In the end the guy I had sex with was kind enough to personally call me to tell me they chose the other candidate. It was actually a good experience as they had interviewed 8 people and it came down to 2 of us. I wasn't sure I was going to take it as the benefits were lacking. He did say at the end of the call he hopes to run into me again. No complaints here.

Sounds like the 'means nothing to me' dude may have some issues. Keep the GPA on the resume because A's do mean a great deal. I think maybe that one has a bit of an inferiority complex and you brought that to the surface. He saw you as a threat (from my dispassionate point of view).

I'm sorry, but, I just cannot get behind that concept of fucking where you have to work everyday, I mean I've seen this before in my 25 yr career, and I can tell you all that doing THIS doesn't end well, and that's no lie, I've seen it many times when you throw-in STDs, AIDS, sexual harassment law suits, pregnancy, divorce, it's really not a pretty picture in the workforce

« Last Edit: March 28, 2011, 11:06:09 AM by denb45 »

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"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

My boyfriend at the time was hired to work on the same psychiatric unit I was working, same shift. We also worked with a married straight couple and a lesbian couple. No problems for any of us.

There isn't a problem until you start having sex w/ other workers, then things can go SOUTH really fast, your otherhalf or a married couple, well that doesn't count, and not what I'm speaking of here, of course there wouldn't be any problems in your situation

« Last Edit: March 28, 2011, 11:32:46 AM by denb45 »

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"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

I don't think I would want an office romance. I've never had one before, but I can see how it could be disastrous: rumors, gossip, people taking sides if the relationship goes sour, lots of drama and stress added to work...

That's relationships... having sex on the side is a different matter I think (Both parties would have to be honest with each other that it's just sex and nothing more... or am I wrong?)

Dan

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“I tried to drown my sorrows, but the bastards learned how to swim, and now I am overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling.” —Frida Kahlo

I don't think I would want an office romance. I've never had one before, but I can see how it could be disastrous: rumors, gossip, people taking sides if the relationship goes sour, lots of drama and stress added to work...

That's relationships... having sex on the side is a different matter I think (Both parties would have to be honest with each other that it's just sex and nothing more... or am I wrong?)

Dan

Or maybe not honest is always the best policy, but sometimes it's not, ever heard of the DL=Down-Low

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"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

Speaking of affairs, my wife works with a guy who has slept with two of their coworkers, both married. About 6 months ago my wife and him had to go to Mexico to do an audit for one of their manufacturing companies. When I first heard of it I didn't think anything of it. I just figured I know my wife and I trust her, she's a grown woman.

Well, I have to admit-- when she called me from the hotel bar while having a couple of drinks with the guy it bothered me. And, when she got back and told me she asked the dude if he slept with Wendy, it bothered me some more.

I accepted it because, like I said, she's an adult. I trust her to make decisions that will always honor our marriage...

But I have to admit, with these new circumstances and a lot of things left unanswered, I wonder. Most of my friends say something is not right. I've decided to let it play out- waiting to see where it goes from here.

Sorry Joe for the hijack, I know this wasn't what you were necessarily talking about. The subject came up and I just felt the need to vent a bit.

Speaking of affairs, my wife works with a guy who has slept with two of their coworkers, both married. About 6 months ago my wife and him had to go to Mexico to do an audit for one of their manufacturing companies. When I first heard of it I didn't think anything of it. I just figured I know my wife and I trust her, she's a grown woman.

Well, I have to admit-- when she called me from the hotel bar while having a couple of drinks with the guy it bothered me. And, when she got back and told me she asked the dude if he slept with Wendy, it bothered me some more.

I accepted it because, like I said, she's an adult. I trust her to make decisions that will always honor our marriage...

But I have to admit, with these new circumstances and a lot of things left unanswered, I wonder. Most of my friends say something is not right. I've decided to let it play out- waiting to see where it goes from here.

Sorry Joe for the hijack, I know this wasn't what you were necessarily talking about. The subject came up and I just felt the need to vent a bit.

PREACH Tomas, I understand your delima, my otherhalf isn't Poz, but he's a grown man, and I cannot tell him what he should or shouldn't do with anyone on Manhunt or adam 4 adam, I told him, that if you get teh aids, don't blame me

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"it's so nice to be insane, cause no-one ask you to explain" Helen Reddy cc 1974

I'm sorry, but, I just cannot get behind that concept of fucking where you have to work everyday, I mean I've seen this before in my 25 yr career, and I can tell you all that doing THIS doesn't end well, and that's no lie, I've seen it many times when you throw-in STDs, AIDS, sexual harassment law suits, pregnancy, divorce, it's really not a pretty picture in the workforce

His untill then unknown child contacting you at work...........

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"If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people ." Tony Benn

Hah, what a classic story! It's that bloody small world syndrome striking again. Life is so full of coincidences. At least you know you were down to the final 2, and all job interview experience is useful for next time. Better luck with the next one!

Have to say, regarding the topic of getting off with co-workers... it's easier said than done. Christmas parties = minefield! When I was a lot younger, one girl wouldn't take the hint... I told her I was gay. She burst into tears. In the middle of the Christmas dinner. Roughly 200 people in the room sat at various tables all went silent while she left sobbing and I sat there looking like a total douchebag.

So next year when almost the same situation happened, I just took the path of least resistance!