“I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity.”

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Oh…K

I guess it is time I talk a little about K. She shall remain K on the blog. I will not be divulging her real name. Actually, I’m sure at some point I will accidentally type it out, so if you pay close attention I am sure you will know her name, because I am a dork like that!

Anywho. K lives about an hour away. She is kind, gentle and wonderful. She is short (will I ever find someone taller than me??), about 5’2″ I’d guess. She has brown wavy/spiky hair and green eyes (actually green, not “I will pretend they are green but they are really quite brown”).

She is generally wonderful. I do wish she liked sports more. We did watch the hockey game on Sunday together, but hockey is about it. And of course, I would love it if she grew a foot!! But I’m not picky about that.

I was telling a friend (Hi Christine!) about her yesterday and she asked me two questions, and I think they are rather important questions. Does she make you laugh? And make you feel safe?

Yes, she makes me laugh, a lot. K is the reason I had 11,000 texts last month. We talk all day long. Telling each other about our days. Sharing useless bits of info about ourselves. She can tell what kind of mood I am in by my texts. Very sweet.

Yes, she makes me feel safe. I don’t like being away from the CLAD. It makes me nervous. But I am okay when I am with K. She holds my hand. Most importantly she kisses my forehead when we say goodbye. She has even asked me if I feel safe around her. I do. I feel comfortable. I know I can tell her everything, even though we have really only known each other for a few months.

She knows all about my ex. She has offered to go with me when I go to sell my rings. She knows it is going to be very hard for me to do, and understands. The first time we met I freaked out. We had brunch and then were discussing what to do next when I simply lost it. I wanted to be away. And I was 100% honest with her about what was going on in my head. And instead of acting like I had the plague, she held my hand and calmed me down. Told me she understood. My emotions are fresh. And still agreed to see me again.

She sees it in my eyes when something reminds me of my ex. And she talks to me about it. She reassures me that she understands. She is so supportive. She isn’t pushy. When we get together is totally based on my time-line.

She knows that I am not ready for forever, and that is perfectly fine with her. She knows that I am not sure that I even want a forever with anyone, and again, she understands. I am blatantly honest with her. I don’t want her to have any illusions or expectations, and she really doesn’t.

This week both Lyz and Joni asked when they are going to be able to meet K. I don’t know. I kinda like that she is all mine right now. Selfish aren’t I? It is like K is my little other reality.

K knows I have a blog, but she doesn’t want to read it, yet. She knows that it is like my journal that I share with my friends. She is so darn respectful.

So, dear blog friends, that is K in a nutshell. She makes me smile, laugh and feel safe. Three very important things.