What do you call a burnt Tesco burger? Black Beauty... and other meat scandal gags to leave you horse with laughter

Since it was revealed last week that a sample of Tesco Everyday Value Beefburgers contained 29 per cent horse meat, the internet has been buzzing with equine jokes at the supermarket’s expense. Here, ALICE-AZANIA JARVIS rounds up some of the best (and worst) quips.

I went to a Tesco café yesterday and ordered a burger. They asked me if I wanted anything on it, and I said: ‘Yes — a fiver each way.’

Does anyone have a tooth pick? I had a Tesco burger last night and there’s still a bit between my teeth.

My daughter has always wanted a pony, so I’m buying her a Tesco Quarter Pounder for her birthday.

Content: Last month, one of the Tesco burgers was found to consist of 29 per cent horse meat

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Bare: Empty shelves at a Tesco supermarket in Bristol, pictured after staff removed the contaminated burgers from freezer compartments

A motorist gets pulled over by a police officer, who asks him to blow into a breathalyser. The machine beeps.‘I’m sorry Sir,’ says the officer. ‘You’re over the limit. Can you tell me what you have had tonight?’‘Nothing Officer,’ replies the man. ‘Just a burger from Tesco.’‘That explains it,’ says the policeman. ‘I knew I could smell Red Rum.’

I won’t be switching to Tesco Finest burgers. They’re so expensive that buying enough for a big family dinner won’t leave you much change from a pony.

I was going to give up fast food for January, but I fell at the final hurdle and had a Tesco burger.

Just been to Tesco and bought a bottle of Bacardi, a bottle of Lamb’s and some burgers. So that’s white rum, navy rum and Red Rum.

Unused HMV vouchers are now being accepted at Tesco. Just tell them HMV means ‘Horse Meat Voucher’.

Despite the recent scandal, Tesco insist they use only meat of the highest quality. A spokesman said: ‘Our meat has to clear several hurdles before it goes on sale.’And the most groan-inducing . . .What’s in this burger? It just jumped over my chips. I don’t know why there’s a fuss all of a sudden. There’s been horse meat in Tesco burgers for donkey’s years.