movie reviews…mostly

REVIEW: Captain Kidd (1945)

It’s time for more pirates! I can’t get enough for some reason. You horror hounds will have to be patient, dirty landlubbers.

First thing you should know is that Captain Kidd was a real guy – and possibly a real pirate. He was tried and executed for being a pirate, but there’s some evidence that he was actually a privateer (a guy who does pirate-y stuff under orders from a King. Kind of like how it’s illegal to shoot a guy in the head unless the President asks you to shoot a guy in the head. Then it’s cool).

Do yourself a favor and read “Pirate Hunter: The True Story of Captain Kidd” by Richard Zacks if you’re at all interested or just a pirate groupie like me. The legendary lost treasure of Captain Kidd has been the inspiration for countless pirate tales, including “Treasure Island,” Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Gold Bug,” and Nelson DeMille’s “Plum Island.”

The film, while excellent, has little to do with the actual details of the life of Captain Kidd. It is, however, a rousing pirate adventure, with plenty of lies, dirty schemes, swordplay, treasure chests and cannon fire.

Charles Laughton is fantastic as Kidd. If you’ve never seen Laughton in a film, this should light the fuse. He is at the same time charming and savage, a glint of fun in one eye and malicious contempt in the other. In other words: The perfect pirate. Other strong performances are given by Randolph Scott as the heroic Adam Mercy and John Carradine as Orange Povey – perhaps the greatest pirate name of all time.

I’m naming my next cat Orange Povey.

The film begins with Kidd and members of his pirate crew hiding a stolen treasure chest from the recently captured English ship The Twelve Apostles. They row into a murky grotto where a hole is dug and treasure is squirreled away. One of the crew foolishly accuses Kidd of treachery and gets a lead ball in the belly for his trouble. The body is unceremoniously dumped in the hole. Ever wonder why there’s always a skeleton hanging around buried pirate booty? Now you know.

Kidd returns to England and passes himself off as a legitimate ship’s captain to King William III, and receives backing from the crown to sail to Madagascar to escort the Quedagh Merchant through pirate-infested waters. Did I mention that this ship carries treasure? Yeah. Indian potentate treasure. The best kind.

Kidd recruits a crew of cut throats and scalawags from the King’s dungeon, promising a royal pardon. Also on board are members of Kidd’s former crew who are scheming to get their hands on the treasure, as well as the son of the slain captain of The Twelve Apostles looking for revenge. Kidd, meanwhile, is trying to sort out a way to kill everybody and keep the treasure for himself.

One word of advice for the Captain: If you’ve taken to the high seas plotting to murder your crew and make off with the booty, best not to hide a list of names of crewman you want to kill tucked away in your desk next to a jolly roger. Just sayin’.

It’s nothing but fun on the high seas with backstabbing, murder and sabotage. Kidd is joyfully blackhearted and sinister. If you like pirates – and if you ever wondered where a lot of the now cliche pirate trappings come from – this is a great place to start.

Laughton’s Kidd shares one trait with his real-life namesake, both were ultimately hanged in the end. Nothing keeps a good pirate down, however. 1952 would see Laughton reprise his role in Abbott and Costello meet Captain Kidd. Oh yeah…