Yeah, it has been over eight years

Note from MindanaoBob

As I have previously announced, this is the 10th Anniversary of LiP, and I have invited back some previous writers on the site to give us an update about how they are doing, what they are up to and how their lives are going.

In that interest, I would like to welcome back John Miele. John was a long time writer on LiP and always had interesting things to post here. Of all of the writers that we have had on LiP, John is probably the person that people ask me about the most. People always want him to come back and write again! John is somebody that I consider a good friend and he is always welcome to contribute here! John’s article below will explain a bit about why he is not writing here. Maybe we will hear more from John at some point. Thank you, John, for submitting this anniversary contribution!

Recently, Bob requested that I write an article for LiP’s tenth anniversary. I was once one of the regular writers on this site for four years, from 2008 through 2012. This article is sort of a random collection of thoughts and answers to questions that have been posed to Bob and myself recently.

John Miele

Why did you write for LiP?

I started contributing articles to this site because I found the site quite useful before I moved to the Philippines. At the time, there were very few online sources of reliable information about the country, and I find the situation much the same in the present day. Yes, there are tons of sites on the web for expats. Most of them are highly biased, poorly written, or are little more than reposts of articles from other sites. There is an awful lot of ranting and general nonsense on many of them, as well. In other words, a waste of time.

LiP is different.

This site presents reliable information that is generally unbiased and balanced in nature.

So… I started writing on this website because:

I hoped that relaying my experiences could help others who were moving here.

I enjoyed writing on here.

I always attempted to keep my articles factual, and researched all of them. I will also note: myself and the other writers on here were never paid to write. Bob helped us with promoting other web sites, or discounts on his services, but we all write because we enjoyed doing it, rather than for financial gain.

Why did you stop writing on LiP?

There were a number of reasons:

First and foremost, time. I am not retired. I have a full time job that must take precedence. I have a wife and a seven year old son, with whom I get very little time due to a heavy business travel schedule. In order to write a decent article, it would take me an hour or two, possibly more if I needed to research something that I wrote (like the articles with legal citations). I always prided myself on presenting correct information. It wasn’t always non-biased, but it was usually correct. This takes time. However, even more time consuming was answering the number of comments posted to each article. Some articles that I wrote (like the ones about visas or squatters), received over 300 comments (Some articles still get comments to this day. Even my article about my 13A visa, which is way “out of date” and inaccurate now). I always believed that if someone took the time to respond, I should also take the time to respond. It became a “Catch 22”. Take the time to write a good article that generates a lot of response, but also take more time to answer all of the questions.

Secondly, I was getting tired of online arguments. My opinions attracted a number of trolls, and, quite frankly, I started wasting too much time that I did not have arguing with idiots (If you don’t like what I have to say, then don’t read it or write your own article). The final factor that made up my mind was that I received three death threats due to this article (two on Facebook and one via email). I do not care if someone threatens me personally online. I have found that most Internet Tough Guys are really just a bunch of hot air. However, I will not risk the safety of my family… period. Since those events, I have greatly toned down my presence online, and rarely respond to Facebook requests, etc. unless I know the people personally. Furthermore, it started many pointless arguments on the costs articles (“Well, you paid too much… I ONLY pay ____ Pesos per month”) or on any article where I voiced any opinion other than “Gee, it’s swell living here!”. I will also note that in all of the articles that I wrote, the threats and nastiness almost always came from other Americans or expats. I very rarely had any hostility expressed by Filipinos towards my opinions.

Thirdly, I was starting to stagnate. You can only write so many articles about cost of living, visas, and daily life before you start repeating yourself. It gets harder to think up new topics.

What happened with the squatters?

Rebecca won the court case (it took over five years), the Sheriff came out, and evicted the squatters with a whole lot of drama (we paid the bill on that, too). They moved to a vacant lot 100m away, that happened to be owned by the mayor, and did not leave that property until the threat was made to revoke their license to offer a “game of chance” at the annual fiesta. We encountered her at a funeral last year and she started making a lot of talk, but pretty much was ignored by everybody and she gave up and went away sulking. The whole process cost almost ten times the price of the land by the time all was said and done.

Any other drama?

Becky had a cousin who was killed in political violence after the last election (in 2013). I will not go into details, and I made a very strongly worded Facebook posting at the time it happened, but I will reiterate a warning that myself and Bob have written on this site many times before: Foreigners have no business getting involved in politics in the Philippines, and voicing a political opinion here can be extremely dangerous. Foreigners have a habit of ignoring this advice, but I will say that what happened in our family hit very close to home and, trust me when I say this: you do NOT want to deal with the consequences. Enough said.

Becky and Juanito were denied tourist visas by the US embassy. This infuriated me when it happened, being that, as a US citizen, I am still subject to paying the income tax that pays the salaries of these useless wastes of space. As you can tell, I am still angry, and, quite frankly, ashamed to be an American (If they are not good enough to get a visa to visit Disney World, then, in my opinion, the United States is not good enough for them to visit.) They said that we could not show ties to the Philippines. Very well.

We have lived here over seven years (at the time)

I am under a long term employment agreement and a permanent resident

We have no bank accounts in the USA. All are in the Philippines or elsewhere.

Our son is in school here. The same school he has always attended.

Rebecca owns land and a house here.

Rebecca owns a business here.

All with stacks of documentation. The helpful advice given by Ms. Embassy Employee? For me to move back to the USA, petition them on a green card, uprooting my family and probably costing me my job (I do, after all, handle the Asian market for my company.) Yeah, I am sure they read this site. At this point, I really do not care. Their attitude disgusted me so much that I want nothing to do with any of these leeches on society. Now, were I to be able to do things differently, I would have brought Rebecca to the USA on a K1 visa before getting married. Something to think about for those who are contemplating moving here.

3. My neighbor died, and quite suddenly. He was the only other expat in our compound (he was Dutch) and I lost a good friend. It is difficult to put into words, but when you expatriate, there are times that you will feel very much alone. Those times get much less frequent the longer that you live here, but for a month or so after he died last year, I felt very much by myself.

4. I had a particularly nasty encounter with a Canadian expat at my agent’s office late last year. He was an employee there. I had just met him, and we were in the van going to dinner. Thirty seconds in, he started lecturing me about how “All Filipinos are thieves” and “You cannot trust any of them”, ad nauseum. I glared at him, told him “My wife and son are Filipino, and they are not thieves” and advised my Filipino hosts that they needed to keep a close eye on him. He was out of a job within a week, and I truly hope he is suffering (Funny enough, for some reason he was unable to return to Canada).

Have I learned the language?

No, I am still embarrassed to say. I remain a complete idiot in this area. I do pick up new words and phrases, but I have reached a level of acceptance that it will still be difficult. My level of travel this year is also on track to be around 250 days, which makes regular classes / retention still more difficult.

How is living here now?

I have mellowed quite a bit in some ways. I tend to accept that things are different a little easier now. Queues at the mall, government offices? No problem. Traffic? Annoying, but it is what it is (no road rage). Filipino time? Ok. Plan for it. Tampo? A mini vacation. Silly documentation for mundane things? No problem.

There is a sole exception: “Customer Service” hotlines here are about one step from useless. I have had two infuriating instances: Internet and the Bank. Both were asinine. Both were instances where large companies know that you have few options other than to bend over and accept an anal intrusion. To be 100% fair, “Customer Service” hotlines and I did not particularly get along before I moved here. As an aside, I discovered two ways of dealing with it:

I have a very extensive LinkedIn network. I connected with board level people who are on LinkedIn, and a private message there bypassed all of the hotline nonsense and resolved the problem immediately.

I sent an invoice to the companies in question for the value of my time that they wasted (I pay myself P5,000 per hour). I kept a log of the nonsense calls and how long they kept me waiting. I mailed the invoice to accounts receivable, never seriously thinking that they would pay, but I felt better. I did receive an amusing phone call from a bank’s legal department informing me that THEY were not amused. Funny thing is, my problem was immediately resolved after our conversation.

Any advice for those thinking of moving here?

Accept that things will be different.

Stop over thinking the visa process.

Stop worrying so much about security. Fear can be rational, but what is irrational is letting fear control your life.

Cost of living is what it is, and it will never get cheaper. Do not obsess over the price of chicken. It is not a contest to see who can live “cheapest”. Cheaper does not always mean better.

Stop worrying about exchange rates. This is not so prevalent right now, due to a high USD, but a couple of years ago there was a hell of a lot of “doom and gloom” BS being tossed around on the Internet. You cannot change the rates, and you WILL need to deal with it when they go down again (and they WILL). Nobody cares about your “fixed income”.

Except for this site and a couple of others, believe only about half of what you read on expat web sites. There are a lot of barstool pontificates living in the Philippines, and a lot of stuff that is simply untrue or that is pure crap is written online.

Make friends with your neighbors.

If you are moving here for love, think with your big head and not your little head (especially if there is a huge age difference between you).

You will not change things. Only Filipinos can change things. This country belongs to Filipinos. You are, and always will be, merely a guest here.

There will be things that you miss from home.

If it is available in the USA, it is probably available somewhere in the Philippines. It may be expensive, limited quantity, limited choice, or limited to “only in Manila”, but it is available here.

When you move, take the amount that you think you need to ship and cut it in half.

Be extremely cautious about buying real estate, especially before living here for a while. Land and real estate is a minefield here.

Don’t think that your white skin makes you more qualified for a job.

Don’t think that your white skin means you know more than everyone else.

Don’t think “they are all out to get you”.

Nobody in the Philippines really gives a damn about US politics. There is little Obama hate here.

Yeah, you are a “rich” foreigner. You may be over charged. Get over it. Accept the fact that you were born into greater privilege than 90% of the rest of the world merely by chance.

Yeah, her family may ask for money. You knew what you were getting into, right? Or are you really that selfish and stupid? See bullet point number 8 above. No sympathy from me.

When you start referring to Filipinos at “They” or “Them”, then perhaps it is time to seriously start thinking about returning to wherever it is that you came from.

Every public official or police officer in the Philippines is not corrupt. I have met many who are just trying to do their jobs.

Will I write any more articles?

Perhaps in the future, if I have more time. Bob has told me that I can submit an article whenever I wish. There have been a few times that I almost did (When the squatter issue was resolved, when I got my Philippine Driver’s License and let my US license expire, when I renewed my ACR for the first time this year), but I got very busy and never found the time to write.

In the near future, my travel schedule is extremely tight, and I do not see much free time. If Bob asks me to write an article for a specific purpose, I certainly will agree to do so for my friend.

I will also note the following:

I still find LiP to be the best resource on the Net for people thinking about moving to the Philippines.

I consider Bob a friend.

Bob’s other services are useful, and he does a very good job with delivering value. In the past, I have:

Used his web hosting services.

Used his web design services.

Bought flowers for delivery.

Bought one of his E-books.

I can honestly state that in my business dealings with him, he has performed as promised, with honesty and integrity, and I would not hesitate to use his services again, should I require them.

John Miele is a Citizen of the World, having spent time in many locations around the globe. Currently, he finds himself in Manila, but travels throughout the Philippines. John joined the Live in the Philippines Web Magazine in mid-2008.

Good article. Good information. I almost hate to ask you a question on here because you kind of mentioned that you didn’t have time to reply always. Sorry, if you don’t have time maybe some of the other readers can answer. I know you are well traveled and you also mentioned something about letting your U.S. drivers license expire. Got me thinking:
I am going back to the states in July of this year. My drivers license expires in 2017. So, can I (a) renew it now in 2016, and (b) since I sold my home in the U.S and now live in the Philippines, what address do I use to obtain a license?

Also, my passport expires in 2018. Can I apply for a new passport while in the U.S even though the old one has not expired? And again, what about the address issue?

Hope you or someone has answers for me. Good to see your articles once again.
Dennis Glass

Hi Dennis, in case John does not have time to answer, I will jump in, but of course John is also welcome, I don’t mean to jump in out of turn.

1. Since you live in the Philippines, and not in the USA, why do you need a US license? You can drive in the USA with your Philippine license, that is not a problem. So, as far as I know, there is no reason or need for you to get a US license.

2. As a person living in the Philippines, you should do your passport renewal at the US Embassy in Manila. It is all very simple to do. Here are a few links for articles on the site of how to renew a US passport:

John:
I absolutely agree. Bob hosted and did the fixes for a client of mine and there is no way I could have been happier. The client paid me as part of his overall package for my consulting work so my name was on the line with the client.
I cannot recommend highly enough.

On the driver’s license, it is state by state. Some, like Florida, make it very easy to renew online. I will state that getting a Philippines license is MUCH easier if you do it before your US license expires.

As to passport, it is now taking about 3 weeks. I would renew when you have about a year left on it.

Great and insightful updates, thanks for sharing! I’m sorry to hear about Becky & Juanito not getting their visas as well as losing your Dutch friend. I agree w/ Jim above – I can sense the passion in your writings, no wonder you’ll find it exhausting & needs to take a break from it (& of course those nasty threats). Stay safe.

John,
Thank you for your article, I enjoyed reading it. 1 question and ignore if I am being nosey. But if u are married why have u not gotten a USA visa (I think it is K3) for ur family. I am interested in ur opinion on the matter as I know very little about it. For my wife we went the K1 (found it to be tiring in dealing with the Government, asking for the same info over and over again) but it got finished and now my wife is dual citizen which makes it easy when we travel internationally, plus easy for her to own land and do business here in the Philippines. Plus after I retired we moved here which I truly enjoy.

So this is advised to do this instead of marrying in Ph ? I would have brought Rebecca to the USA on a K1 visa before getting married. Something to think about for those who are contemplating moving here.

You know in all my dealing with first Immigration and Naturalization and now Homeland Security I have only ever run across one Immigration Official that was friendly and helpful. I have always said that people only complain about the IRS because they have never had to deal with INS or the VA.

The update on the squatters was much appreciated since I was just thinking about the situation the other day as the wife was talking about buying land again.

Sorry to hear about the death threats some people are just stupid. Especially since your only stated opinion in that article was that it is a very bad idea for a foreigner to own a firearm in the Philippines. Other than that it was facts about why it was a bad idea. This coming from someone that is a Staunch US 2nd Amendment supporter, which does not apply to the Philippines.

As to the travel, WOW! Most of those aren’t so bad but France is a long haul. Wife and I talked about travel once we move to the Philippines since travel to South East Asia out of Clark, Manila, and now Cebu is so easy and relatively inexpensive. Of course she now wants to see Europe as well. Might need to visit there before we move. Do not envy that much travel especially since it is the business variety and not the for fun variety.

Hi John, good to read one of your articles again you tell it like it is no messing about that’s why people connect with you, served that Guy from Canada right
Wonder where he is now lol, thanks for sharing Derek in pasig.

Good article John. You might try giving Cherry Blossom in Hawaii a call at: 808-889-6209 to ask about getting your wife and son to the US. They have a lot of connections as they have been in business since 1974 and I do believe if anyone can help you, they can. I know several people they have helped personally and it is fairly painless. Good luck.

I enjoyed reading this and your previous articles. I think I started reading and writing the occasional article after you stopped writing. I have a parallel to your Canadian expat. We were at one of the pot luck type parties here in the Raleigh, NC area where the Filipina wives talk in one place and their Kano husband drink beer and talk in another. This guy boasts that, “He could have any woman he wants in the Philippines.” My response was, “My wife is from the Philippines and you could not have “had” her without marrying her.” He rephrased his statement. We are both lucky I have stopped drinking heavily or things would have gotten ugly.

Jay,
I always enjoyed your articles, although I did not find this site til you were about to stop writing your articles, but I did go back and read all your articles, quite some time ago. Sorry to hear about your wife and son not being able to get a tourist visa to come to the US, I cant for the life of me figure out what the Hell the US Embassy actually considers to be adequate ties to a persons home country to be able to get a tourist visa, we will be trying to get my wife a tourist visa also, but I fear I already know what the outcome will be, although she has 2 Aunts that got them in years past, but I think it may have been easier a few years ago than it is now, and if Trump should win, he may lock the borders to everyone from entering the US.

I also can see why you would have stopped writing articles here after your explanations. I very seldom leave comments here anymore mainly because of one of your reasons that you posted.

Best of luck in your future, and I wish you much success in whatever you do!

When I was working on my last project in Singapore I managed to get a tourist visa for the US very easily for my wife and child. My colleague had trouble getting a US visa for his wife though and the reason was that her Singapore temporary residency card was only valid for a few months. The explanation given to her was that she never had due reason to return to Singapore despite the fact that she presented the renewal forms to the embassy.

Her Singapore residency card has since been renewed and she got a visa without any problem.

We will try, but most I have known or heard that tried were turned down. She does own a house there that she rents out,she is 45 years old , and her family members have a pretty good size rice farm, but other than that not a lot to show for wanting to return to Philippines other than thats where we will soon be living, so that being a short period of time wont help us much, I doubt. I just want to get it so she can come to US with me when I return for visits, but doudt we will stay over a month at the most.

I really enjoy your generally unbiased insights into various subjects. I cannot understand why your wife and son were denied visa’s. My wife had no problem getting a 10 year multiple visit Tourist Visa in 2013, though she does own a sizable piece of property. He interview lasted less than 5 minutes. Another thing they take into consideration also is travel outside the Philippines, which the more of that, the better your chances for approval.

Your right. Don’t waste time with people that don’t know what they’re talking about. I was a moderator on a site for a long time. I kept telling a new moderator to stop wasting his time trying to persuade someone that his point of view was right. But he wouldn’t stop. Finally he got burnt out and quit.

We had a friend who went 7 times to the US embassy to get a tourist visa. She said I guess they got tired of seeing me and thus finally gave her the visa.

I can see why the OP attracts quite a lot of dissent from readers of this site. Many of his points can and ought to be rebutted:

4. There is no competition to splash out and outspend anybody either. I like a good chicken for 100 peso that I can eat over two days.

6. What makes your opinion more valid than those coming from other expat forums?

7. I live in a condo. People come and go.

9. You can’t change things even in your home country but if something is on the books then you sure can have it enforced. Most kanos are just too damn lazy and are content to be used as a door mat and walking ATM.

10. No, not really.

11. Is this LiP (exclusive to Americans only)? There are other kanos from other countries you know.

13. It’s illegal to buy land. End of story. No your wife owning the piece of land doesn’t give you any rights either. Using a Filipina dummy is also illegal. Anyone that does this and houses the family is a fool.

16. Maybe not, but you will always be first in line when the Barangay captain comes a knockin. You will also not get the benefit of doubt in a dispute and the locals generally stick together no matter who is wrong or right.

17. Again, not all of us are Americans. I don’t have any Mates that go on about Obama nor care. Is this addressed to all foreigners or just Americans once again?

18. I don’t think it’s wise to tell anybody to “get over it” or to “accept” an act that is illegal. Filipinos voted to get rid of such dishonest practices. Perhaps the Manila Bay analogy is an appropriate one? Is it an analogy?

19. And you always have the right to say no. Foreigners are not and never have been obliged to support the relatives of their wives. They survived long before the foreigner came and they’ll survive long after the foreigner is gone.

20. Well I don’t know their names how else can I refer to them?

21. Nothing is 100% absolute but why is it that corruption is so talked about regarding public officials in comparison to other countries? Why is it common for someone on a scooter to have 100 on him just incase and why do things suddenly speed up once pera is exchanged hands?

From what I see, this site does a good job in promoting the positives but deliberately accepts the negatives and refuses to even acknowledge it. These things are real whether the OP likes to acknowledge it or not. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy myself in the Philippines. I’m just a realist.

What, exactly, is a citizen of the world? I was born and raised in America, and lived in the Philippines for three years. I am a “citizen” of the US in that I need a passport and their “permission” to travel outside the country and I’m forced to give up a percentage, a large one at that, to those who claim dominion over me. To that extent, they do, but I consider myself a citizen of nothing, because I do not accept that anyone has the moral right to rule me, you or anyone else. As long as you live your life without infringing of the life and liberty of others, nobody should have dominion over you.

Sadly, the Philippine people, absolutely wonderful folks by and large, are especially keen on obeying authority. The obedience to authority has resulted in genocide at levels unimaginable by individuals acting of their own volition throughout human history.

You can keep your citizen status. I’m do my best to try to avoid obeying any authority that infringes on my rights as a human being. I’ll do so peacefully, but with all my heart and soul. Nobody owns me except the Lord, to whom I will one day return. Until then, I will do my best to remain free.

Well John, sounds like we are in agreement on that, then. I think folks are a little hysterical in their fear of Trump, although I find it comical that people elected the clown. Xenophobia is very real, though.

People are really spun up about Trump and his wall, yet they don’t seem to realize it is a CRIME to cross the border illegally, so he’s actually only enforcing the laws. The fact that there is a border is the issue, and that’s what people miss. Either eliminate the border, or enforce the laws.

BTW, I happen to love the Philippines, and its people. I met my wife at the US Naval Hospital. My wife was doing her internship there at the time and our eldest was born there. Our daughter plays soccer for the Phil National Soccer team, and I hope to spend at least half of my retirement (God-willing) in the Philippines. Although I’m a white dude from the US, part of me will always be there.