President Obama should have had colonoscopy without sedation

Does anyone out there know why President Obama underwent a virtual ‘colonscopy’ (VC) instead of a conventional colonoscopy earlier this year?

In my gastroenterology practice, we do not offer colon cancer screening to 48-year-old individuals, unless special risk factors are present. Of course, maintaining the president’s health is in the national interest, so I understand why professional screening guidelines might not apply to him. For similar reasons, airline pilots are subjected to routine cardiac testing, not to protect the pilots’ health, but to protect the passengers. Stricter scrutiny of the president’s health is proper.

So, if the national interest required that the First Colon be studied prematurely, then why didn’t the president choose the screening test that nearly every physician opts for when we turn 50? I’m baffled.

It is inarguable that a colonoscopy is more accurate than VC and can remove polyps and obtain biopies at the time of the examination. In every instance that I recommend a colonoscopy, I present virtual colonoscopy as an alternative adventure of the lower bowel. Patients invariably reject it, despite its safety advantage, because they do not want to endure a VC laxative prep to discover afterward that they need a colonoscopy to remove a lesion.

VC also has radiation risk, which is belatedly capturing the attention of the press, physicians and the public. The FDA acknowledges that radiation exposure from VC is equivalalent to about 400 standard x-rays. We have been broiling too many patients for too long. I am also concerned that VC, like all CAT scans, will discover incidental ‘abnormalities’ outside the colon, that will generate anxiety and a medical cascade chasing these faux lesions that are nothing more than radiographic curiosities.

Medicare has declined to cover VC for colon cancer screening, presumably as they have not been persuaded by available data. Interestingly, ABC News reported last week that Julian Nicholas, a former FDA scientist, stated in an interview that “there was an absence of sufficient, valid scientific evidence to conclude that the use of CT devices for colorectal cancer is both safe or effective.” Nicholas alleges that after he declined to withdraw his objection to VC, he experienced a VT, a virtual termination. The FDA states that there was no retaliation against Nicholas for his dissenting view. Yeah, right. Sounds like the agency spokesman was engaging in some VS, or virtual spinning.

Perhaps, President Obama wanted to avoid the sedation that is administered before a conventional colonoscopy. Was he scared to transfer his presidential powers to the Vice-President? Did he fear that during these few hours, that Biden might go soft on Netenyahu, invite Jeremiah Wright to a White House prayer breakfast or simply start spewing ‘BFD’, as he did in the president’s ear — and in ours — just prior to the signing of the health care reform bill?

What would I have done if I were the president’s gastroenterologist? I would have devised a solution that would have met two tests:

Provide premier presidential colonic protection

Permit the president to retain his powers

This is easy. I would have advised the president to undergo a traditional colonoscopy without sedation, as routinely occurs in many nations whose citizens do not have the expectation of comfort that we Americans do. In addition to receiving Cadillac colonic care, there would be a political dividend. The president, by shrugging off a few stomach cramps, would show the world his toughness. This would earn him deserved respect from his political adversaries here at home, and might induce some leaders abroad to reconsider their policies. While all of this is hypothetical, here are some headlines that might have followed a presidential colonoscopy sans sedation:

Mr. President, your colon cancer screening choice had geopolitical ramifications. While this damage is done, there may be a way to restore some of our power and prestige. Find out when Biden is due for his next colon exam. If it’s not due for a while, then declare it to be necessary now by executive order. Direct him to proceed without sedation, so the world can fear and respect the man who is a heartbeat away from the presidency. If he balks, tell him that he needs to take one for the team. Afterwards, at his bedside, let him know that his sacrifice was a ‘BFD’ for the nation.

Unsedated colonoscopy could become a new standard for political candidates. Their handlers would make sure that after the candidates kiss the babies, eat rubber chicken, acknowledge the local mayor and dignitaries, wear a hard hat and reject polling data; that they will jump on board the GI Colon Express with only a bullet to bite on for anesthesia.

Are you listening Mitt Romney? Here’s your opportunity to vault ahead before this procedure becomes as politically required as eating at the local diner. Go for it, Mitt. There will be light at the end of the tunnel.

President Obama should have had colonoscopy without sedation 8 comments

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ninguem

With Reagan, as I recall, he had a negative sigmoidoscopy, and some time later, had a colonoscopy that showed cancer higher up in the colon; by the cecum as I recall, is my memory correct on that?

PAUL MD

Dr. Kirsch,
TOXICaly MEGAfunny COLONblog! Still laughing! If you are as skilled with the colonoscope as you are with the pen, show me the prep! But please, I’ll pay for the sedation cuz it’s a BFD to me…and please while you are in there…GO LIGHTLY!

Its same old same old, The Sheeple get an old fashioned colonoscopy at age 50, Barney Frank gets it for free at a military hospital…
and I think its a cover, hopin the radiation from the scanner will knock out any baby lung cancer cells…
or maybe it’ll stimulate them to grow faster..

Frank

Healthcare Observer

Nice one Michael. but have you had an unsedated colonoscopy done on yourself?

Anonymous

Physician experts from the American College of Gastroenterology recommend to begin colorectal cancer screening in African Americans at age 45 rather than 50 years, (Am J Gastroenterol. 2009;104:739-750) which is probably why Obama got his at 48.

SarahW

Obama is a young man and the test was only a screen. The virtual colonoscopy would reveal any tumor likely to take him out within the year. He’s only going to be there for three more, God willing, and he’ll get a test every year, which is not what other people will get. His virtual test is fine for the purpose. Any significant mass would have been detected.