Saturday, January 28, 2012

Sympathetic help for unacceptably fat women

Some of these women are the victims of passive fatness. On the bus to work they watch other women scoffing chocolate bars and cream cakes, they inhale too deeply, and before they know where they are they find themselves wolfing down unwanted chocolate bars and cream cakes themselves.

But other women are gratuitous, wanton, self-inflicted fatties. They have adopted a militant, fattist, anti-man lifestyle. They luxuriate in the epithet "fat slag". They meet at secret, single-sex cholesterol parties solely with the intention of achieving an adipose high.

They patronise dress shops which use curtain material and stage hangings for ball gowns. They indulge in deep Rabelaisian laughter which makes them wobble all over.

They walk around with pink wheelbarrows supporting their bellies. They emit a pungent odour of whale grease and burnt tires.

Persons of this second kind cannot be tolerated by a civilised and caring society. We urge the United Nations and the World Health Organisation to take preventive action.

We do not advocate the mass culling of female fatties as some are doing, but it is important that a fair and transparent international flab tax be levied on those of female gender whose expanded dimensions have become an eyesore to people of sensitivity and discrimination.

This blog has never ducked the issue of female size. We have always addressed the matter in a focussed and scientific manner. Some examples of our research are linked below.