“Hello, I
just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things
from my shed… Well, you don’t have to worry about them now because of just shot
them.” Then he hung up.

Within five
minutes, three police cars, an armed response unit and an ambulance showed up
at the Waters residents and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the
patrolman said to Roger: “I thought you said that you to shop them?”

Roger
replied,” I thought you said there was nobody available!”

The moral of
this story – don’t underestimate old people!!

Better Than a Flu Shot

Miss
Beatrice, the church organist was in her 80s and had never been married.

She was
admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.

One
afternoon, the Pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint
sitting-room.

She invited
him to have a see while she prepared tea….

As he sat
facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl
sitting on top of it.

The ball was
filled with water and the water floated, of all things, a condom!

When she
returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.

The Pastor
tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater,
but it soon got the better of him and he could no longer resist.

“Miss
Beatrice”, he said, “I wonder if you would tell me about this?” Pointing to the
bowl.

“Oh, yes,” she
replied,” isn’t it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago
and I found this little package on the ground, I read the directions and it
said, to place it on the organ, keep it where it and that it would prevent the
spread of disease.

Do you know,
I haven’t had the flu all winter?”

Did You Enjoy the 70th Birthday JokesWhat's Roger the Todger up to in 10 Years Time? Find Out Here