Dealing With Multiple Pickups & More

The fact that they were sharing a pen and paper is fantastic — really. Go with it.

You're doing fine — just fine. Keep up the great work, and I'll keep working on my hip hop.

reader's comments

I got your book and I've read it twice. It's helped me to pinpoint areas where I need to improve and basically understand some of why women do what they do. However, I have a situation. Normally, I'm a smart ass, I'm always making smart comments and I'm a general joker. The problem is when I go to a club or a bar with gorgeous HBs (Hot Babes), my mind goes blank. It's almost like my brain locks and all I can do is look without anything to say. Needless to say it frustrates the hell outta me. Any advice? Should I do some affirmations? How do I overcome this?

david d. responds

I think your problem is really pretty simple:

You are experiencing something that I have been through a bazillion times. In fact, I think that most guys have been through this cycle at some point in life.

One of the ideas that I teach is "have one good default thing to do in each common situation."

In other words, it sounds to me like you just haven't taken the time to work out a basic system for yourself that will allow you to meet any woman you come across in one of these situations.

Here's your homework:

Take out a piece of paper right now, and write down your one single favorite way to start a conversation with a woman.

Next plan out exactly how the conversation should go in your mind.

Then, mentally rehearse this scenario over and over and over until you have it clearly in your mind.

Finally, go out tomorrow night and use this one introduction to meet 10 women.

The next day, sit down again for a few minutes and think about how it worked for you. Think about ways you could improve your approach, and if you come up with some good innovations, go ahead and do the same process of mentally rehearsing the new ideas until you have them down.

One thing that really makes me laugh is that most guys spend more time rehearsing their voicemail message then they do rehearsing scenarios with women.

You need one good, solid, default thing to do in each common situation with women. So pick one and refine it until your mind no longer goes blank! David DeAngelo

David DeAngelo is the author of the book Double Your Dating: What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful With Women, and several other products that can help men become more successful with women and dating. He also publishes a free online Dating Tips newsletter, available at www.DoubleYourDating.com.