THE WEST BANK, Syria -- The reputable UK newspaper the Guardian reported today that a source inside the Israeli government has leaked documents which prove a Zionist conspiracy to harvest, process, and eat organs of Palestinians, as well as members of the Druze minority and certain Orthodox Christians.

This is not the first time the world has had to accommodate Kosher dietary laws. Coca-Cola, for example, produces and distributes kosher for Passover Coke, made with cane sugar instead of corn syrup, in the U.S. during Passover since RabbiTobias Geffen certified Coca-Cola as kosher 1935.