"We're Pregnant": Ga Ga or Gag?

"We're Pregnant": Ga Ga or Gag?

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At a party, an acquaintance's husband approached the group of women I was chatting with and joined in the conversation by asking, "Did you hear, we're pregnant?" After a few minutes of congratulatory comments, the husband walked away.

My friend turned to me and launched into a ten minute tirade against the phrase, "We're pregnant." "Is he carrying that baby," she asked. "Is he spending his days and nights hugging the toilet as he fights off morning sickness?" "Is he going to have to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a grape?"

Very well put, phatE. You can't just focus on the physical but there is the emotional aspect of pregnancy. I've never met a hubby who went through THEIR pregnancy a zombie and completely out of touch with what was happening- to both of them.

I just don't get how people don't see having a child as a "team" thing.. It's sad they look at the whole experience as about them, and their needs only.. Like I said, it takes 2 to make a baby for a reason.. I think the mentality that the dad really has nothing to do with it is incredibly self focused, and it's honestly grossing me out how much of that I see in people going through this phase of life..
I really agree with whomever said that it's ridiculous for women to go off on men for being dead beat dads, when they've spent the entire time saying it's not their pregnancy, or experience..It's proven that men have a harder time bonding because they aren't carrying the baby, and so I think for the sake of the child and ya'lls happiness it's in the mother's best interest to involve the dad as much as possible and make it a team.. Instead of reminding him he's not carrying it, pushing it out, etc.. Consider the mental and emotional side of things too.. I am willing to bet money that those who try will benefit from it. Marriage is about 2 becoming one, and having a child is a part of that..

TheWozzy, you said it perfect. Too many times guys are slammed for being deadbeats, but yet when a father is excited and wants to have a part he's considered cheesy? I think the phrase is absolutely adorable, and I love when my husband says it. Much better than "yeah, the b*tch is knocked up* :oy:
Yeah, the husband/man may not actually carry the baby, but you tell him that he's not part of this pregnancy equation when he's running out to Taco Bell at 2am for soft tacos, running to publix to get a pack of cupcakes, or catchings the wrath of my hormones.

I'm fine with the saying; he sounds involved and excited about the pregnany, I wouldn't nit-pick which phrase he uses to announce it. So he says "We're pregnant" while the saying is only half true, if he is that exicted let him say it. Doesn't harm anything.

i don't agree with the phrase,....it's just wrong! He is not pregnant! That's all there is to it...he can offer support but he's not pregnant.
it bothers me and really got me thinking when a couple a weeks ago a female friend called me and said " we gave birth yesterday!"....i was like...." Really your husband pushed the baby out?" he carried it to term? how clever of him.
my husband gave me excellent support while pregnant etc....but he was never pregnant himself and never said so....

i did not have an easy pregnancy, but i dare say the pregnancy was harder on him than it was on me. he had to stand by helpless when things went wrong, when i was upset but couldn't articulate what i needed or how to make it better. by no means were our experiences the same, but we certainly both experienced "being pregnant."
now, giving birth? that's a whole 'nother issue ;)

Not only did she make a smart-ass comment, which I'd understand, she went on for TEN MINUTES about what an awful person he was for using it.
I totally get a rolling of the eyes and "Ugh, I hate that phrase." I do that when someone says "the twins" or "the girls" for breasts, for instance, or when someone refers to my daughter as "the girl" or "that baby." But I don't go on for ten minutes about it.

phatE, the way I read it, it was somebody else's husband, not the husband of babysugar's friend. I don't think the woman was railing on her own husband, just venting about an expression she doesn't like. Either way, though, it does seem like a bit of an overreaction. :)

macneil, you said it perfect, there are PLENTY of other things to worry about before the misuse of a pronoun.. the thing that irked me most about this article was the woman's attitude.. her husband came up and talked to her friends, asked if they had heard, were obviously excited, and then he walked off and the wife made some smart ass response.. i don't understand the disrespect, if the tables were turned, and the husband commented like that on his wife, the wife would be ticked off.. i don't get the 2 sides to the issue, they both made the baby, and they both have a significant part in the babies life.. for the people who think the process of being pregnant and having the child are the only things to consider, then those to me seem like the ones who were more in it for the wedding than the marriage.. either way, there is nothing i hate more than women who put their husbands down and belittle them in front of others, it's disgusting and just wrong.. especially when the husband is trying to be supportive, and excited, etc. it's not his fault he can't "have" the baby so don't treat him like it.. and to the person who commented on the "man" that had the baby, it's a former WOMAN, so really it's just a load of crap.

i'm with many of you- especially phat e . i thought the same thing when i read the beginning of this post!
WE have been trying to get pregnant for well over a year, with no luck so i would imagine that when the time comes to announce OUR pregnancy to people, i wouldn't care if my husband went around saying he was pregnant!

Ha ha, I LOVE it, and always use it. It doesn't stop me whining constantly about being pregnant and telling him he does nothing and has no idea. It's just that it basically means the same as having a baby (the man isn't 'having' the baby either) and my god, modern men completely have to share in child care these days (my husband does, anyway) so the hardship of pregnancy will eventually be less a part of the whole child experience. Anyway, really, there are worse things to be upset about than a misplaced or casually used pronoun.

I think it sounds a little cheesy and, to be honest, if he said it while I was actually in labour, he probably WOULD get his head ripped off. But I'd one hundred times rather have a husband who went around laying equal claim to the pregnancy than one who didn't give a damn about his unborn child or suggested that "we" get a termination instead.

Some of you women are unbelievable. Who cares if a guy says, "he's pregnant." If there's one thing I can't stand, it's women who try to marginalize a father's role and then bitch about deadbeat dads or not having enough help around the house. Some of you even go so far as to say you'd behead your husbands for saying this. I guess if he makes the money, you can't say "our money" or "our house" since he bought it. Equal rights is a two-way street and some of you backwards types needs to get with the 21st century.

I thought years ago women were trying to get their men to say "We're pregnant". Now it's back to "I'm pregnant" only? Like the husbands are infringing on the women getting all the credit for going through the difficulties. I think most people understand that the woman carries it and pushes it out.
I wouldn't care how it was phrased and I would be glad that the husband was taking part, whether it was my husband or someone else's husband/partner.

I've never heard a guy say, "We're pregnant", but some people get really excited when they're telling the news to people. I don't care what people say. As long as they're happy about being good parents for their child(ren).