Cat and Mouse: Catching Your Cheating Spouse

Is he frequently coming home late, working overtime, or going on business trips? Is she distant and unavailable, always preoccupied with her computer or mobile phone? Do you have that terrible feeling that something is wrong and you don’t know what to do about it?

With the boom of online dating websites and social networking apps, cheating has become more and more convenient. Some websites are even marketed to people who are married or are in a committed relationship, with such provocative slogans as “Life is short. Have an affair. ” The harsh reality is people want to cheat, and they do.

According to a survey, 74% of men and 68% of women would cheat if they knew they wouldn’t be caught. And 33% of the respondents admitted to infidelity. These respondents claim to have cheated just once (around 20%), two to five times (around 30%), and more than five times (over 40%) with an average affair lasting two years. There’s a wide range of where they met their lover: at work, while traveling, online, at the gym, in the bar, at weddings, the list is exhaustive. It might even be someone you know: 32% of women and 21% of men had an affair with an old flame – a previous boyfriend/girlfriend or crush.

If you seriously intend to catch your spouse in the act, be prepared to deal with the consequences. Here are four ways to find out if he/she is cheating:

Check his/her mobile phone…

…or straight up invasion of privacy. This is the quickest way to find out. Given that your spouse doesn’t have a password, once they leave their phone around, simply check their call history and messages. Check all the recent messages, don’t focus on names because they might be using an alias. Check their photo albums if there are any pictures that are inappropriate. If they have a password, figure out how to get access. Be very cautious. If you are caught doing this without permission, it might lead to a confrontation.

Bugging your home

Again, this is another approach can lead to a confrontation if they find your apparatus. You can remotely access your computer’s webcam and setup a surveillance camera in the bedroom. You can also keep a sound recording device to hear any suspicious phone calls or if you’ve been having unwanted visitors when you’re out of the house.

Invasive apps and websites

If there are apps and websites that make affairs easy, then getting caught is pretty easy too. If your partner is not careful with what he/she posts on social media, what places they’ve been checking into, and their photos getting tagged – then you’ll get to the bottom of your sleuthing in no time. But if they’re smart about hiding it, consider contact spying apps and GPS tracking apps to find out who your spouse is talking to and their whereabouts.

Hire a private investigator

Maybe you’re still on the fence about this whole thing and you don’t want to personally catch your significant other and offend him/her. The easiest and fool-proof way is to hire a private investigator to do the job for you. A licensed investigator will evaluate your situation and offer different ways of obtaining evidence such as: photos, videos, call logs, GPS logs, and other reports of investigation. You can use these materials to confront them now, to file a lawsuit, or to keep for future reference.

Having doubts about your spouse takes a toll on your emotions. Consider all your options before taking any action. Do not jump into conclusions. Sometimes, the best way to find out is to ask directly. And honestly, if you have any inkling of doubt, maybe it’s time to take a good hard look at your relationship and what you want to do about it.