Its been a glorious spring and most of us here at the Center for the Study of Absurdity have gotten our gardens planted and are awaiting the wildflowers of summer. Welcome to another edition of Tea Party Potty Tricks where we pledge to "keep the stupid in the news."

Today we start off with the Joe the Plumber, who told parents after the latest university shootings, "your dead kids don't trump my Constitutional rights." While this may be legally true, only a morally bankrupt sociopath would say this in such a way. But as you know, we here at the center would be out of business without Tea Party sociopaths and religious crazies.

Next on our list would be Ben Carson calling Obamacare, "the worst thing that has happened in this nation since slavery" fame. This time around, the crazy neurosurgeon without a prefrontal cortex informs us that Obamacare is also worse than the terror attacks of 9-11. Not kidding.

In the anti-science crackpot community, Rep. Jeff Miller (R-Fla.) has a brilliant new idea to combat those tree-hugging commies. Miller says that man-made climate change is a hoax because the dinosaurs went extinct without global warming. Not kidding.

George Will doesn't disappoint us either with his latest claim. Being a victim of sexual assault is a coveted status in campus life. Not kidding.

Oh, we forgot Tony Perkins of the Family Research Council saying that Christians being forced to bake cakes for gays is like forcing Jews into Nazi ovens. Not kidding.

Winning our award for best satire of the week is AZ Starnet's article, "500,000 'Impeach Obama for leaving an American behind in Afghanistan' protest signs found in dumpster behind RNC. We are not sure this is satire, yet given the state of Tea Potty Land. . .

Our Republican with a brain this week is Bruce Bartlett, a former Reagan adviser who used the terms morons, stupid, bigots and ignoramuses to describe the Tea Party on the Ed Show. Now yer catching on! And who cannot love the Oklahoma gun dealer Rich who opines, "Open Carry Tarrant County is like the demonic offspring of Westboro Baptist Church and Boko Haram." Beautiful.

While we are in the Teanderthals, we can't let Fake News off the hook. Brian Kilmeade told viewers that Bergdahl's dad, a registered Republican by the way, looks like the Taliban and that is un-American. Wait a minute, the slovenly looking guys on Duck Dynasty who look similar actually believe in some of same things the Taliban does. Phil Robertson has advocated anti-gay beliefs, racism, more God in government and marrying young girls. Sound rather Talibanny to us!

Okay, we are running out of space because its been especially crazy lately so lets just string some stuff together. Gun-nutter and all around lunatic Alex Jones claims the Isla Vista and the Las Vegas shooting Sunday were government operations to discredit gun-loving patriots. Patriots or escaped mental hospital patients? Jones, who runs the website infowars, even explained how he would have carried out the Las Vagas shootings if he were a government agent. Not kidding.

Right-wing Family Research Council senior fellow Ken Blackwell linked the Isla Vista mass killings to marriage equality laws. Todd Starnes of the 'American Family Association' can't wait for a president who loves America. Lyle Grover and Ben Shapiro are concerned about the increasingly successful crazification of the far right by liberals. Hello.

Just wanted to publicly thank Ken Goodman for recommending the concert by Gathering Time this past Saturday at the Belknap Mill. WOW is the only way to describe the evening. They next show up in N.H. the month of January in Wolfeboro; if you get a chance, go.

As Ken mentioned, you can google Gathering Time to see what you missed. Hopefully they will return to Laconia next year.

In the news, not so much is being said about our veterans, since the trade for one deserter for five top Taliban leaders. Was that the plan of the administration?

Bergdahl has been receiving treatment in Germany, while honorable veterans are still waiting. Illegal aliens can go to any hospital and get treatment immediately while our veterans have to wait for appointments and treatment. . . . or are denied treatment.

Friday, it was announced that the administration will hire 100 lawyers for the large number of illegal underage immigrants that have crossed the border. I understand their homeland is a dangerous place and promises for a good future for the children is slim.

Our veterans cannot go to a hospital without approval of the VA. Soldiers are fighting for the benefits they were promised. They have to fight on their own, and yet our president is hiring lawyers for illegal aliens. What is wrong with this picture?

Marine Tahmooressi is in jail in Mexico for taking a wrong turn. He called 911 for help. Did our president hire a lawyer for him? What is the White House doing to help him?

Bergdahl's family took part in video conferences. As far as I know Tahmooressi's mother is trying to get her son out of jail in Mexico. The White House is not helping her.

With the hiring of lawyers, more and more illegal children immigrants will be sneaking into our country.

So instead of taking care of our veterans, we will take care of the illegal alien children. And what is more, our president is encouraging more to sneak into our country.

I am a mother and feel for these children. I would do anything for a better life for my child. To not give care to our veterans and give to others is a disgrace. Our country would not be the country it is without our veterans.

The president is renewing "Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals", which gives work permits to illegals younger than 30 years of age.

Yet he sits back and waits for others to do something for our veterans. He has a pen. Why can't he write a law to give our veterans care NOW!

The federal government transferred some of these children to Arizona and asked Arizona for medical help for these children. Did the federal government ask Arizona to give medical attention to our veterans? Not that I know of.

Why do illegals get better treatment than our veterans? If our federal government treats illegals better than our veterans, the federal government will treat illegal aliens better than the ordinary citizen.

Elections are coming. I do not want a representative who just asks for someone to be dismissed as was done with Shinseki. I want action. What is their plan?

There is no person running that will vote the way I want 100 percent of the time. I want the same beliefs. I want a plan of action not just voting. What are they going to do if elected? What have they actually done while in office?

In the primaries — are we going to vote for better treatment for our veterans? Are we going to vote for a better America?

On behalf of the Advisory Board and all the volunteers of Got Lunch! Laconia, we would like to sincerely thank the eight restaurants for participating and supporting our fourth annual Eat Out for Got Lunch! Laconia fund-raiser. It was a great week of fun, food and friends while raising funds and awareness for our summer healthy lunch program.

We were able to raise $2,182.93 from the donations given by T-Bones/Cactus Jack's, Village Bakery, Burrito Me, Hector', Patrick's Pub & Eatery, Tavern 27, Brick Front and Fratello's.

It takes $110 to feed a child a healthy lunch for the the summer break. This will help feed 19 of Laconia's finest kids.

We also want to thank all the wonderful members of our community that went out to eat lunch/dinner at one of these wonderful restaurants to support a very important cause to help end childhood hunger in our city.

Please visit our website www.gotlunchlaconia.com to learn more about this fabulous program and see how you can get involved or make a donation. We also have our own Facebook site so go on and "like" us.