Monday, June 30, 2008

THE MIKE AND THE MAD DOG BUCKET LIST

With the end possibly near, we've decided to compile The Mike and the Mad Dog Bucket List - all the things we would like to see Mike and Chris do before their show kicks the bucket. Here goes:

- Have Mike do the show open the way Chris does it- Take a call from Jerome- Show Mike on YES during the commercials- Apologize to Tim Russert's family for trivializing his death- Ask Michael Strahan to cohost a show- Let Chris predict the ratings- Hug- Do a fist pump at the end of a segment- Go a week without Jon Heyman- Invite Phil Mushnick into the studio for some tea- Take picture in a booth with 'Mike and Dog - BFFs forever' written below- Do a top 10 list of their least favorite guests ever- Switch seats- Do an over/Under predicting what age they will die- Mike does Marquis de Sade wearing crotchless panties- Sing the Mike and the Mad Dog theme- Have John Sterling guest host a segment and let him play audio clips of all the incorrect things you have said over the last 19 years- Treat people like human beings- Admit that Tampa Bay just might be for real- Come prepared- Inform the audience that you are going to resolve your decades long dispute with a game of Rock Em Sock Em Robots. Winner stays at WFAN. Loser is out.- Have Mike sing 'If I Only Had a Heart' from the Wizard of Oz- Learn how to use the internet- Mike admits everything he's been wrong about- Never talk horse racing again - Car pool to work everyday and spend the first segment of the show discussing the ride- Mike and Chris tell the audience that they have cut the caller off but are going to continue talking like he's still there- Reveal the special phone number that allows Bruce from Bayside to get on whenever he wants- Admit that they should never talk about anything outside of sports because they don't know enough about movies or the news or politics- Mike eats a salad and drinks a bottle of water while on air- They do an entire show with Chris sitting on Mikes lap- Mike admits that Bronson Arroyo is not good

37 comments:

1. mike and chris end a show with "i love you mike. i love you chris."2.mike asks dog how he is after dog greets him in the open to the show3. mike admits he only read the last few pages of all those kennedy books4. russo chews through his earphones5. chris uses the computer6. chris says "say something funny mike" and mike actually says something funny7. they both admit to thinking susan waldman is hot

Nice job with the plug on the Fan. At least Dog admit he's wrong, unlike Fatcessa.

This is a great list too. My suggestions:

1) Admit Somers is a better radio host than they are. 2) Write a check on air for the rights to every golf/tennis/baseball/football game they've done play by play on from the TVs in their studio. 3) Have Mike admit to his major cosmetic surgery done on his face, while passing on the gastric bypass recommendation.

Great list. What frustrates me the most about MMD is that often it seems like they don't even read the paper or check anything before they sign on. Don't you have to prepare before sitting in the big chair?

I'll admit, I spend WAY toomuch time on sports, but as I drive all across the Northeast with my job, it drives me nuts how unprepared they are.

That said, there are so many bad talk show hosts, they still rank high.

I laughed my ass off today when Evan Roberts said that the 1986 Mets captured New York. That may be true, Evan, but you were 4 years old at the time, how do you know.

How about "Russo finally learns that wins and losses have NOTHING to do with how the pitcher pitched, and more to do with the batters' performances (can be linked to forcing Russo to look at Mike Mussina's career numbers as proof that a era over 4 can produce 19 wins in the win column).

And not sure if I missed this on the list, but "Never talk about tennis ever again."

and while we're at it, how about "Russo and Fatso admit hockey is a sport that New Yorkers watch!"

and last but not least, "mike admits hes got a massive weight problem (and its name is not chris russo)"

I heard one of you guys plug the blog on the air today, so I thought I would check it out. If this post is typical of what you do, I will be back. This is "tremendous." You did an "enormous" amount of work. Seriously, very funny and accurate take on the show.

This is a great site, thanks for mentioning it on the air. I actually don't mind when Russo throws in some tennis and some other sports. Too many of these sports hosts spend their whole shows talking about the NFL or whatever sport is popular in their area. I mean ESPN radio and FSR talk football because they don;t really follow baseball. ESPN talks basketball because they are told to because ESPN broadcasts NBA games.

But, when MMD come off as experts on all sports, it's comical. My bet is that Mike hasn't watched an NBA game in three years. He picks the Spurs because he likes the Spurs and he figures that they will win the NBA title every two years.

Russo hasn't watched a regular season college basketball game in years, yet he can tell you that Hofstra got shafted in 2006, even though the team they beat twice, George Mason went to the Final Four.

How about they admit that they were two of the only people stupid enough to think a dominant middle reliever is more valuable than a dominant starter? Notice how they downplay everything Joba does as a starter now?Also, Mike could masturbate on the air to a picture of Brandon Inge.

I do agree with Dog. Santana has been a disappointment. The Mets are not paying for Santana to make quality starts (6IP, 3 ER), they are paying him to make dominant starts. Where is the 7 inning 0 runs, 8 inning, 1 run, 8 inning 0 run starts.

Going 6 innings and giving up three runs....that's what Andy Pettitte does, but according to Mike, Pettitte is great!

Here we go again, ranting about NBC's tennis coverage. This is what NBC does. We know that they don't do a great job covering live matches, but how many years can you complain about the same thing over and over and over.

NBC is going to show Americans when they can---live or not. Doggie is tennis fan, he knows all the players; the rest of America only cares about Americans. I guess Doggie has not heard of the Tiger Woods Effect.

Once again, Doggie doesn't get it. NBC is going to show Olympic Trials coverage BECAUSE THEY BROADCAST THE OLYMPICS. They are trying to build up Tyson Gay so if he wins the 100 meters in China, the table will be set.

1. Mike says "Say something funny Dog"2. Replay the "One Time!" tirade in its entirety3. Mike admits that at least one caller over the past 20 years knew more than him about something.4. Chris leaves the Giants to be a full-time Yankee fan.5. Dog does Mike's handwave to get rid of callers.6. One last 24-hour Mike and the Mad Dog marathon to end the show, with the entire thing being aired by YES with the incompetent Eddie Erickson producing, plenty of Sweeny killing, Sterling calls, and replays of Suzyn's call of Roger Clemens return while the two of them continuously mock & laugh.7. Tony Russo calls in to talk about how he got up last night to go "wee wee."

guys tremendous job with the list, but I can't get too excited about it. I don't want to fall in love with the idea of MMD going away. Gotta be careful here. I would like to go waaay back though and hear Chris carry on about Louie Carneseca and the St. John's basketball team. Noone says Carneseca like Doggie.

learn that minor league players, especially in the Yankees organization, actually can fill voids on the team. no need for Bronson Arroyo. learn the name Mark Melancon, bonus points for pronouncing his last name correctly the first time.

and part 2 to that: learn that a team can't just "go get" a CC Sabathia or Erik Bedard or Rich Harden, etc.

I'm really a 1050 listener, but i bounce back and forth sometimes. I heard your plug and was intrigued, because I used to love Mike and the Mad Dog. I stopped listening for most of the reasons I have come to read here. i have something to put on the bucket list:

Puppy needs to not say the time before going to break or an update.

Puppy needs to also put a spit guard on his mic ( I feel bad for whom ever uses his mic after him)

Contributors

Mad Dog.wav

Mike and the Mad Dog Glossary

Be careful: Mike and Chris' way of telling sports fans not to fall in love with a player or team ("Be Careful about falling in love with Pagan")

Let's be fair here: Russo's counter-argument to callers that attack someone ("Let's be fair here. If you are going to knock Rick Peterson, you gotta give him credit for John Maine")

This whole notion: When Francesa or Russo declares something to be fact when in actuality, they are making it up themselves ("This whole notion that Mike D'Antoni is going to make the Knicks a playoff team is a joke")

Pipe Down: Russo's way of telling a player to shut up ("Pipe down there Figueroa")

Tough Spot: This is usually a negative. 'Tough spot. Aaron Heilman. Can't trust him.' They rarely say, "I really like Chauncey Billups in a tough spot." Even though Mike and Dog don't trust a lot of athletes in a tough spot, you can earn your way out of this label. For example, they couldn't trust Eli Manning in a tough spot until the Super Bowl. Now he can basically retire and still be a legend. He proved he can perform in a tough spot. This phrase is used by both Mike and Dog.

Tricky Spot: This really means an awkward position. For example, Ian Eagle running into Marv Albert at the Garden. Or I'm sure that the Giants last game of the 2007 was a tricky spot. "Coughlin wants to get ready for the postseason but you have to try to end the Patriots' undefeated season. Tricky spot, Mike." And for clarification. This phrase is used primarily by Russo.

Say Something Funny Mike (When Russo can't control himself and breaks out into laughter and tries to egg Francesa on to keep it going. Picture Russo hysterically laughing followed by "Say Something Funny Mike")

First time, long time (this term is announced by a fan calling to the show, who has been a long time listener of the show, but is making his first ever call in - hence, first time (caller), long time (listener)

I can't go too crazy - This is a Mad Dog special. Dog uses this phrase to throw cold water on enthusiastic callers("I can't go too crazy about the D-Rays in May. Talk to me in September.") or admit that he doesn't have strong feelings about a subject("I can't go too crazy about the Olympic torch protesters.").

A-Game - This is Mike's new terminology that he applies to a Yankees win in which the starter goes 7 innings, Joba pitches a perfect 8th and Mariano closes it out. "The Yanks need an A Game tonight."

Bad Job: This is Mad Dog's way of criticizing something. It can be applied to players, coaches, general managers, fans - even networks, as in "That's a bad job out of NBC on the Derby Broadcast."

I'm not a big believer in: This is mainly a Mike comment. It means he doesn't have much confidence in something. And just like other comments, this is mainly used in negative, eg. 'I'm not a big believer in starting someone on 3 days rest.'

The whole bit - Russo's phrase when he is alone and wants to keep the conversation moving along. Without Mike there to add any details, Russo will use 'the whole bit' to sum up a person or issue. 'Selig will make it into the Hall of Fame. Steroids, the whole bit.'

Mike and the Mad Dog Photos

One of the more uncomfortable shots you will ever see of them

Mike and the Mad Dog Photos

On Location (yes, the show does sometimes travel forcing the duo to sit awkwardly next to each other)

Chris Russo

Russo going off on Pacman Jones, one of the classic rants in show history (see Video section for link)

Mike and the Dog Photos

Posed (notice Francesa has to be slightly more upfront and center)

Mike and the Dog Photos

At work (the traditional YES split screen - Dog on the left, Francesa on the right)