St Johns Southgate

08 Apr 2020

I know that you are scared

A couple of months ago, before one thing and another changed all of our lives, my six-year-old son, Theodore, was excitedly preparing to attend a friend’s birthday party.

As you do, we had Theodore make a card for his little friend, and predictably, as he embarked on that arty and crafty adventure, his three-year-old sister insisted she wanted to join in – the result being that she also was making a card, but for a child she’d never even met! When it came time to write the message, we asked the younger child, Genevieve, what she’d like to say in the card to child X. Without skipping a beat, she said, “Dear X, I know that you are scared. From Genevieve.” Naturally, for a dark humoured bunch, a chorus of laughs went around the table, with Genevieve even joining in. But it got me thinking, why can’t we greet people in such a fashion?

We’re all sick of hearing people say it, but we are living through extraordinary times. And so, we’re all anxious in our own ways, or grieving the loss – if not of a loved one – of our former ways of living and being. So, perhaps it isn’t such a bad idea to cut to the chase with our family members, friends and neighbours. Instead of asking the, “How are you going?” question – which is invariably responded to with, “Yeah, fine” – perhaps one could start a conversation with something not dissimilar to, “I know that you are scared.”

In the 12th chapter of Luke’s gospel we read the words of Jesus stating that, “There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known.” I take this not just as an ushering towards honesty before God, but also as an encouragement to openness in our relationships. If you’re feeling miserable, why not say so? If you’ve got a cough and are terrified it might be COVID-19, why not share that fear with someone? If cabin fever is setting in and the kids are driving you up the wall (could this be self-disclosure?), why not say so on the video chat with the other parents rather than painting a falsely flattering picture? Dropping our defences, conceding our concerns, acknowledging our anxieties to the socially distant listening ear, might just hasten the healing of our emotional turmoil.

The words of Jesus that follow directly on from his sayings on concealment and disclosure are these: “I tell you, my friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more.” Here Jesus puts it all into context for us. Our internal lives – our fears and griefs – meet the external reality of mortal strife. As usual, Jesus really hits the truth button. He is saying to us, I know that you are scared, and no, your fears aren’t neurotic, this is life and death. But even if COVID-19 takes your body, or the body of someone you love, it cannot take the soul – it cannot take away my eternal promise that “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live.” •