Pirates...

This is a discussion on Pirates... within the In the News: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly forums, part of the The Back Porch category; Isn't it time for several countries to band together and rescue the 300-400 captives still held captive...then destroy what's left?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11754357
Our correspondent said it ...

I found a Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin (in the Sudan ) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania ). The cost is a bit high @ 800 per person double occupancy but I didn't find that offensive. What I found encouraging and enlightened is that the cruise is encouraging people to bring their 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise.

If you don't have weapons you can rent them right there on the boat. They claim to have a master blacksmith on board and will have reloading parties every afternoon. The cruise lasts from 4-8 days and nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double occupancy (4 days). All the boat does is sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get hijacked by pirates. Here are some of the costs and claims associated with the package.

Crew members can double as spotters for 30.00 per hour (spotting scope included).

They even offer RPG's at 75 bucks and 200 dollars for 3 standard loads .
"Everyone gets use of free complimentary night vision equipment and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."

Meals are not included but seem reasonable.Most cruises offer a mini-bar... these gung ho entrepreneurs offer......... get this..... "MOUNTED MINIGUN AVAILABLE @ $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire". Sign my ars up!

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money
back including gun rental charges and any unused ammo ( mini gun charges not included).. How can we guarantee you will
experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia . If an attempted Hijacking does not occur we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia . At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to attract attention. Cabin space is limited so respond quickly. Reserve your package before May 29 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice."

As if all that isn't enough to whet your appetite, there were a few testimonials .

" I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'LL never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!"---- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the
minigun. PIRATES 0 -PASSENGERS-32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks English" Ned, Salt Lake city , Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM. Don't worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got c lose to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty a im--reminds me of a drunken 'juicer' door gunner we picked u p from the motor pool back in Nam" --"chopper' Dan ----Toledo USA.

" Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them bleed and cry in the water like little girls. Saw one
wounded pirate eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot!! This is a must do.--- Zeke-Minnahaw Springs Kentucky USA

I found a Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin (in the Sudan ) and docks at Bagamoya (in Tanzania ). The cost is a bit high @ 800 per person double occupancy but I didn't find that offensive. What I found encouraging and enlightened is that the cruise is encouraging people to bring their 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise...

That was awesome! We need someone to mock-up an infomercial for youtube.