Month: August 2016

And how we went to the Royal Quays afterwards where (sadly) the hubster didn’t get his football boots (for anyone who is overly concerned about this and his football career, he did come home with some last night. He was match ready for that all-important Tuesday night 5-aside kick-about-skive-out-of-the-house. Not forgetting that Sunday Morning league. But hey – he probably needs a different type of boot for that. What do I know).

Well, we had a venture to the DW Sports Store as a last resort in search of said football boots.

While the OH wheeled Ella over to the footy boots, I sauntered over to the women’s trainers. On the guise that, although my current pair fit, they’re a little snug and thus prohibiting any attempt at running this damn cake weight off, I started trying on running trainers.

In the middle of doing long strides along the wall of trainers in my second pair, a bloke from the shop asked if I needed any assistance. Other than a miracle cure to melt cake fat, I smiled and said I was OK and just trying different styles of running trainers. I obviously looked as clueless as I felt amongst the ‘cushion’ and ‘support’ footwear.

So it went a bit like this (not the exact words but from what I recall and artistic licence, here’s what went down).

‘Why don’t I get one of the girls to do you a pronation assessment?’

A what? Hmmm why not?

‘We get you to run on the treadmill and film it, slowing down the footage to assess your feet’

That’s why not.

A) Running in the middle of a shop in my skinny jeans and a vest top that’s slightly too low for this activity. The jacket that would hide my modesty would need to be discarded for practicality

B) My fat ass would be on film – slowed down so every ripple and lump could bounce and wobble in spectacular fashion

‘It’s free.’

Why the hell not? I’m always making up excuses that I don’t have the right footwear and here’s my opportunity.

So I took it.

One of the shop assistants came over. She went through a form for me to sign and we discussed taking two shots; one in a pair of support trainers with cushioned insoles and another with just cushioned trainers. I signed the form. There was no going back now.

First pair of cushioned trainers strapped on and the jacket tossed aside, the OH rocks up with the pushchair in tow, looking rather bemused. His unsuccessful attempt at locating any football boots was quickly forgotten about when I explained what I was about to do.

It took everything in him not to film this torture and the fact that he had to walk away on the pretence he wasn’t going to watch so I wasn’t put off meant he was pissing himself laughing. He blatantly perched himself behind the trainer stand and witnessed the entire humiliation.

Take one and I got the speed up, shouted ready and then ran for about eight seconds. Yes, that’s all – they only needed a five second shot anyway. Thank God.

I got off and went to join two assistants (yes another had turned up to witness my atrocity) who were stood behind the treadmill studying a computer.

A computer that had my whole backside slowed down, my ass swishing and swooshing all over the place. I wasn’t paying any attention to the ‘pronation’ discussion initially as I was horrified at the fact that my one and only pair of skinny jeans made my legs look like sausages wrapped in elastic bands. Why did no-one tell me?

Stuff it.

I’ll just have to suffer a few weeks more. I desperately need a whole new wardrobe for Autumn. After maternity clothing and then wearing to death any summer clothes that are flattering, I’m looking forward to a change in season. Hopefully these trainers will turn me into Jessica Ennis-Hill and I’ll lose those last few pesky pounds. Then I’m raiding H&M.

Back to the pronation. Here’s a link to the Runner’s World website with video clips and a better explanation than I could ever offer if you’re interested.

I was diagnosed with ‘Under Pronation’ – an insufficient inward roll of the foot after landing. This places extra stress on the outside part of the foot. In short – I do need cushioned shoes with support.

Take two and I’m trying on support shoes with an in-sole cushioning. My feet feel strong – like they could run a marathon (let’s not get carried away – they feel like they can run).

This time I completely ignored the ass swooshing and focused on my feet looking stronger in the video.

By now I was feeling confident and asked the most bizarre request – could I run with the cushioned shoe on one foot and the support and cushioned in-sole on the other. You know, just to compare them.

Which I did despite the amused look on the assistant’s face.

It sealed the deal and I made my choice; support with cushioned in-soles.

I bought my New Balance Support trainers. I mean, I’m not too crazy about the look as there was a pair that I thought looked so much better. But these do the job.

Now to put them into action.

I was scouring Facebook and came across a post from Blyth Valley Children’s Centre advertising a running group in Cramlington where you can take your buggy. Perfect!

The group is These Girls Can Run and it’s ran by a lovely lady called Kim. They hold sessions every Mon, Wed and Friday morning at 9.30 for the buggy and baby brigade. They also do evening sessions at 7.30. It’s £2 and you meet at Northburn Sports and Community Centre.

Image from These Girls Can Run Website

I was apprehensive as I haven’t done anything like this in my life, let alone with a baby in tow. I contacted Kim and she was amazing. I explained I had a buggy and I’m not a very good runner at all. She encouraged me to come along and tagged a fellow buggy runner in the post so I had a familiar face to meet on arrival.

The night before, the route was posted up on Facebook. Luckily I used to live in Cramlington so I had an idea of the route although my memory is not particularly great at the moment. No sweat, I’ll probably be last so I can follow everyone else.

Kim was actually off the day but Adele took the group instead. She was just as nice and even brought her dog along too. In total there were three of us with buggies, one of which was a double one, a solo runner who was also beginning and Adele and her dog. The route was 3 miles and the weather was wet but slightly humid.

For someone who is awful at running, I did pretty impressive by my standards to do a mile and a half without stopping. We all have to start somewhere and this group is really supportive for that. Funnily enough, I found it easier pushing a buggy, especially alternating using one hand to push and the other arm for momentum (or whatever the terminology is).

At one point I was alone – I was in the middle of the pack but couldn’t see anyone in front or behind, so I kept going the way I thought I should be going. I forgot to set my phone as well to track the distance and I don’t own a fitbit boohoo.

There was a part of the route where you could do another loop if you wanted to. I didn’t (surprise surprise). Little steps though.

I got back to base and we did some cool down stretches. It was then, to my horror, I realised my top was inside out. Argh! It could only happen to me! In my defence I’d thrown it on under a long-sleeved top thinking it looked cooler than it was outside, not paying attention in my usual mad-dash rush to get out of the house. Never mind.

I loved my first session with the group – I learned some breathing techniques and I found running in a pack is way better for your morale than out there alone. I think Ella enjoyed it too – the look on her face when she woke up mid-run to see my panting, beetroot-red face was priceless. But she’s used to this crack, I’ve been to many a buggy bootcamp now.

I’ll definitely be back – I missed this Monday with it being the Bank Hol but with a choice of Wed and Friday as well I’m sure I can fit it in around all the baby groups.

How I imagine I look when I’m running – wistful and graceful haha! Image from Unsplash

This girl wearing an inside out top can and will run. I refuse to have sausages-in-lacky-band-legs any longer.

Oh. My. God. I am on a complete and utter high after this weekend’s Tall Ships Event held in my very own hometown of Blyth!

Fave Ship Everrrr

Seen as though I am on my ‘summer holiday’ (private uh-hum ‘joke’ between me and the OH. Won’t bore you with the details but yes we did join the whose-had-the-hardest-day-brigade. Something I vowed I would never do. Bah). Sorry where was I? Oh yes, so seen as though I was off on Friday and I live right across the road from the beach, I thought it would be a marvellous idea to troop on over and watch the ships roll in (!)

So, having fed, washed and dressed both myself and the baba in record time we managed to get out the house and over to the beach just after nine (major woohoo and high five). It was perfect timing to get caught up in the build-up atmosphere as staff, volunteers and visitors were trickling in.

It looks deceivingly quiet on this pic!

The weather was unreal – blue skies with that lovely sunshine shimmering off the sea. Perfect Tall Ship Hunting Weather. Although there was a slight breeze which meant I couldn’t put the parasol up on the pram (had an experience down the beach once where this nearly blew off towards some unsuspecting sunbathers. Needless to say I was impressed at my most unlikely ninja reaction and I caught it just in time. Very unlike me).

Waiting for some Tall Ships, is that one in the distance??!

So we sat and waited. I was a bit frightened In case I mistook random boats as Tall Ships – I mean, how tall are they anyway? Plus Ella was restless once we stopped so I did a lap of the beach, only to find I’d missed one as I came back to our Hunting Spot.

Never mind, like buses, none came and then two came at once. Just after an old lady pushing a dog in a pushchair asked me the way to the harbour (true story).

Yey, I got my Ship Fix and we went home, saving ourselves for the evening where we could scoot off down to the harbour as a family to see them all.

As soon as the OH was in from work, we scrambled out the door and headed towards the Harbour via Ridley Park. Being a resident of Blyth and so close to the event itself, I was anxious that there’d be utter chaos with traffic and the temporary one-way system. Needless to say I was impressed the whole weekend with the organisation of not only the Tall Ships Event but for the traffic and parking measures that were put in place. As a resident it was minimal disruption and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed seeing Blyth come alive these past four days.

Ridley Park was a hive of activity itself with fairground rides, market stalls and it’s oh-so-famous playground water feature. We ventured along to the Quayside and swooned at the ships (and I also at an Orlando Bloom look-alike from the what I call Pirate Ship. I’m not too sure what it’s actual name was?? I couldn’t see the side or the flag on the top properly).

.

My other favourite ship was the ‘Dar Mlodziezy’ near the end of the harbour right next to the stage and the bar

Where I spied them serving prosecco hurrah.

How convenient!

A bit pricey (£9 a round for fizz and beer) but what the hell – what maternity leave? Remember I’m on my s-u-m-m-e-r h-o-l-i-d-a-y. So we had two rounds of drinks. YOLO

We finished our night with a beer and a burrito (from the Zapatista stall). We got to eat in peace after Ella’s grandma kindly offered to take her back to hers and feed her while we ate. We sat in the lifeboat hanger where there was a band warming up and (selfish mother alert) I relished in the pretence of our old life and that we were out on a date.

Saturday we did it all again (minus the alcohol) with some friends and more family.

This time I purchased some amazing Cheesy Peasy Pease Pudding from the Pete’s Puddin Stall. Nom Nom.

Sunday we gave it a miss as it rained in the morning and by the time the sun got out we resigned ourselves to the fact we were going to have a lazy day. So we stayed at home and ate Sunday dinner and drank wine.

As we have a baba it meant we missed out on the fireworks at 9pm (although if you stood in a certain part in our garden you could see them between the houses).

You could hear them though.

Which made me want to see them even more. By the time I decided to change out of my pj’s and run to the front of the estate to catch the finale, it was over and I was just a strange lady standing on a street corner breathless. Not something I want to be known for.

The calm before the storm – beating the rush at the Coastline. Major Tile Love for this place

So Monday I desperately needed my Tall Ship fix. We made a day of it; getting up early and heading to Coastline for our breakfast and then walking down to the Harbour.

This time we walked through the back of Ridley Park car park to the Harbour which we’d missed entirely in our previous trips. This was really good as it had the navy ship and helicopter’s.

We walked into the town centre to see the fair at the market square, then back along the Harbour to see the ships one last time before they set sail.

We had a pit stop at Ridley Park where tea and pudding was sorted for the evening by purchasing Sausages from The Geordie Banger Co and a Chocolate Tiffin Brownie from The Brownie Bar.

For a Bank Holiday Monday the weather was unbelievable – perched on deck chairs by the water park while feeding Ella with all the hustle and bustle you’d have thought we were on holiday abroad somewhere.

Never seen Blyth Beach as busy!

It seemed like everyone else had the same idea as us – to watch the ships sail out from Blyth Beach. Which is obvious really I don’t know why I was surprised. Despite the crowds we still had an amazing view of watching them roll away again (!)

What else was there to do now it was all coming to an end?

Sit on the dock of the bay wasting time? Or sit in the back garden drinking vino blanco? Guess what we chose.

Well done to everyone who was involved – you did Blyth proud and no doubt well and truly put us on the map.

Last Friday we had the time of our lives(!! couldn’t resist) at Baby Power Ballads.

Image from Gateshead Library

I’m not so sure I would’ve ventured to something like this on my own (which in hindsight is a trifle sad as I would’ve missed out on what was an epic afternoon out).
One of the mammy friends who I met at Pregnancy Yoga (which was awesome – shout out to Lush Tums) invited me along and how could I refuse? An hour of introducing Ella Bells to power ballads while I unleash my ‘voice of an angel’. Perfect!

Tickets were £4 with a £1.07 booking fee and I booked mine online through a link on the Facebook page. I intended to print the ticket off but got caught up in all the mental checklist of things to do to get a baby out of the house that I forgot. This dawned on me as I drove towards the Tyne Bridge with a whingeing Ella in tow (drive time was meant to equal nap time – but no. I blame myself, I put her car cover down so I could see her in the mirror. She took this as an invitation to fight for my attention instead. Not ideal when fighting Friday afternoon traffic).

Image from Gateshead Library

The event was held at Gateshead’s Central Library in their Caedmon Hall and ran by a company called Chalk.

Chalk are Jen, Jilly, Roxy and their mini Chalkers who are the inspiration behind the family focused organisation based in the North East.

Image from Gateshead Library

The Baby Power Ballads was part of their Cineplay Festival held 19th-21st August across Newcastle and Gateshead.

Gateshead Central Library had plenty of parking but it did fill up quick. Luckily there is on street parking and a smaller car park just opposite. There is a lift from the ground floor to the first floor but it’s only big enough for one buggy at a time. This wasn’t a problem for me, I seem to think lugging a car seat around is an Olympic sport at the moment – which I’m sorely regretting!

Never the less, I needn’t have worried about my ticket, a lovely lady from the Chalk group greeted me at the door of the Caedmon Hall with ‘The List’. Flashbacks to numerous-not-getting-into-VIP-areas-in-clubs ensued. But have no fear – my name was well and truly on this list. Hurrah!

By this point Ella was on top form, flashing her biggest smile with no trace of the whingey

Image from Gateshead Library

tired baba from the car journey. We got settled in the middle of the floor, where there were musical instruments laid out on a circle of rugs and cushions in front of a projector screen.

Songbooks with lyrics were handed out – I think I squealed in delight. One of the members from Chalk sat with us and played the guitar, leading the tune-fest that included (I’ve had) The Time of My Life, I Will Always Love You, Dolly Parton’s 9-5, Here’s To You Mrs Robinson and – wait for it – Bohemian Rhapsody! That was hilarious introducing that one to Ella.

Even more exciting was that the films the songs belonged to were projected onto the screen! The atmosphere was incredibly jovial; babies happily playing with instruments while the mammies pelted out the songs – like we used to with a hairbrush in front of a mirror (or was that just me?) It seems that by having a child, you loose your inhibitions somewhere along the way.

Ella loved it and powered through for forty-five minutes of sitting on my knee doing what she does best – people watch. I saw the signs that an imminent hunger cry was threatening to escape and quickly shoved a bottle in her mouth – to which she promptly passed out just before the end of the event. She lasted longer than my friend’s little boy – he slept through the whole thing! Way too cool for school that kid.

Once it ended, we were encouraged by the Chalk team to sit around for a bit and not rush off, which was nice. Especially as Ella had done what she rarely does and fallen asleep on me – I didn’t want to move. But it was short-lived and as soon as she was awake, out the car seat came and along with it the suggestions of what to do next.

Image from Gateshead Library

So us mammies did what we did best – sought out the nearest coffee and cake establishment, which fortunately happened to be downstairs in the library. It just took a while to get there as the mammies got in the lift one-by-one hurrah hurrah. Gotta love a coffee and a chocolate brownie after a baby event.

Another Saturday morning and another Wilford adventure in search of a local haunt to stuff our faces.

I was originally booked onto two exercise classes at Xercise4less (trying to escape for a couple of hours me-time and leave the baba with the hubby, see how he likes it. Payback for when he sods off to football on a Sunday morning) but when I woke up, that flipping mam guilt voice told me we ought to do something as a family.

So, sounding like I was doing him a favour, I suggested I skip the classes and we all go out for breakfast (again!) I know, I know – I had an opportunity to escape and I didn’t take it. I’m sure I’ll regret it when he’s off to yet another NUFC match (eye roll).

Surprisingly, we arrived at a decision really quickly (which doesn’t happen often in our household – especially over what to eat and where).Turns out hubby wanted to visit The Royal Quays outlet in North Shields to have a look in the Nike store for some football boots. I struggled to think of somewhere near there to go so when he suggested we go to Crusoe’s in Tynemouth en route, I agreed. Wow.

Crusoe’s is on the beach overlooking the sand and the sea down from The Grand Hotel (where we had our wedding reception nearly nine years ago. Crikey it’s our ten year wedding anniversary next year eeek! I want to go back to Vegas to celebrate – minus a child in tow. He doesn’t. I’ve got a year to work on him plus I’m open to babysitting offers – please apply within).
Before I go any further – I know I’m not the most maternal of folk but I do want to add a ‘P.S I love my child’ in here. Despite the underlying moan tone I have on this blog toward little people – it is all in jest and I do have a heart.

I’ve cried twice this weekend; once (well numerous times actually) at the story, picture and video of five-year old Omran Daqneesh injured in the airstrike at Aleppo. I’m sure I’m amongst millions of parents who hugged their children a little bit tighter that night. His little dazed face and lack of tears are harrowing at how he accepts this as a way of a life; no emotion other than the sheepish look when he wipes his bloody hand on the chair after touching his little injured head. Totally and utterly heart breaking.

The other time was at a heart wrenching story that I came across on Instagram yesterday morning that I just can’t get out of my head.

Michelle and Andy Cottle experienced the stillbirth of their daughter, Orla, back in May. They’re cycling from Vancouver to the Mexican border in San Diego to raise funds for the Stillbirth and Neonatal Death charity (SANDS). I can’t begin to imagine the pain they are going through but the strength they’re showing is incredible and inspiring. They’re website is called Dear Orla and you can read more about it and follow their journey here. They both do a brave video (which you can also view on the website – have plenty of tissues handy!!) where they tell their story #CyclingForOrla. You can also donate here.

It puts everything in perspective and is all the more reason to spend time together as a family. I know I am lucky and I am thankful for what I’ve got.

Back to Saturday morning and after cruising along the coast from Blyth, we parked opposite Tynemouth Park again and walked down. We passed an early morning running club – a brutal reminder that I’d ditched my own morning of exercise in favour of food. Ooops. Oh well, I’m trying out a buggy running club today so I’m hoping that redeems me. Should be interesting!

We both had bacon sarnies; I had my usual filter coffee and he had his usual diet coke. So predictable. I spied a gingerbread latte on the menu and made a mental note to return nearer Christmas for this festive tipple ummmm.

I’ve been to Crusoe’s once before and it was every bit as beautiful as I remember; cosy and welcoming with it’s wooden furniture and twinkly lights giving it an almost festive feel. This was heightened by the slight autumnal chill on Saturday morning; grey skies and drizzle meant cardies had been replaced with coats. Otherwise we would have opted for outdoor dining.

Of course, nosy parker Ella couldn’t resist snapping up a perfect people-watching opportunity so out of her pram she came, perched on the table, catching the eye of a young couple across the room. I’m bias but she has such an infectious smile and she was bestowing it upon anyone who would take notice.

You see, I have an addictive personality and I shouldn’t be allowed to download games like this. When I was younger, I lost countless school holidays and early evenings to Super Mario and Sonic the Hedgehog. I’m in danger of losing my maternity leave to Pokémon Go.

Or am I?

If I’m completely honest, I haven’t got a clue what I’m doing. I don’t understand the game or characters, I just love the thrill of seeing a pidgey-me-choo or whatever they’re called and firing virtual balls at them.

I only walk around my house and into the garden to catch them as well, I can’t be bothered to go any further afield looking for them.

Maybe adulthood has quashed this addiction, or maybe I’m holding back as I know how life-consuming these games can become.

My thought process was that I could go Pokémon hunting while taking Ella for a walk(!)

I know. Life has hit a new low.

I don’t recommend it. Pushing a pram with one hand and holding your phone searching for these virtual creatures with another is not a great combination. Pram-in-sand-dune-bush springs to mind (those warnings to take note of your surroundings blatantly aimed at the likes of me).

I sometimes have a flick on the game when I’m feeding Ella (I know, bad parent but sometimes bottle feeding can be sooo boring. This is when I’m normally on Facey or Insta.). So instead of catching up on social media I’m trying to catch any Pokémon hanging out in my house.

It tends to change with the seasons; I embrace the blonde bombshell and beach waves in summer and the toned down caramel colours with a fuller fringe in the winter.

Just before I fell pregnant, I experimented with balayage. It just happened. A tinkering of

Pregnant hair don’t care.

dark at the roots migrating to softer caramels at the bottom. It quickly turned into my signature pregnancy hair as the longer ‘roots’ pasted on made my hair feel in better condition and gave it a break from the blonde.

Although my hair is naturally a boring mousey colour, I usually don’t think the darker colour suits my skin tone. I find that I have to overcompensate on the eye makeup too. But balayage was the perfect combo as the blonde ends balanced it out.

So where does the pink hair come into this equation?

With my hair being super blonde at the moment, my roots are uber dark. Despite getting my hair done every six weeks, there’s a couple of weeks where I need to do some route disguising tricks; a bit of dry shampoo/a messy parting/ back comb the roots.

Well this summer, I’ve added a hint of pink to the mix.

My sister went through a phase of having a tint of pink in her hair earlier this year. When I asked her about it, she referred me to the fab range called Bleach London.

Now these are perfect for blonde hair.

With the standard silver shampoo to even out brassy tones (a must-have shampoo for us blondies) they’ve added a range where you can get a hint of colour to your blonde hair too. I’ve also spied their hair colour crayons now.

I’ve opted for the Rose Shampoo. It’s a wash in, wash out shampoo so it’s ideal for those couple of weeks. My thinking is the pink distracts more from the dark root. Plus I’m on maternity leave and have no work to be professional for so now’s the time to experiment.

Yup – pink hair don’t care.

A rare straight hair day too. It was a Sunday and I had time to blow dry it straight.

I mean, it’s not outrageously adventurous – it is just a hint of pink after all – as this pic will show you. But in the right light (I was struggling to get a picture of this), it gives me ‘candyfloss hair’.

You can get other colours in their range (check out the Washed Up Mermaid colour – argh!). They do semi permanent one’s too which I think I might experiment with towards the end of my next hair cycle (may have to run this one by my hairdresser first!)

Although there’s a product I’m dying to try now that I’ve found while googling an image for this blog post (I’ve ran out of Matt and Messy and don’t have a bottle to take a pic of oops) – Wild Stylers Beach Waves.

Anyway I’ve been doing the lazy girls beach hair for years – I’m super lazy when it comes to dealing with my thick-takes-years-to-dry mane.

When my hair’s this blonde, it needs a lot of moisture so I use Aussie Miracle Moist Shampoo when I’m not using Bleach London (I cheated on Aussie temporarily with Herbal Essences when I was early pregnant. I couldn’t stand the smell. Now I’m wary of Herbal Essences as it reminds me of those funny days. Bah).

Again, this is just my hair care routine that I’m boring you with I’m not an ambassador to Bleach London or Aussie.

We seem to have fallen into a wonderful habit of going out for breakfast on a Saturday morning.

There’s nothing quite like us all piling into the car and going for an early (ish) morning drive along the coast in search of a bacon sarnie.

Our pit stop this Saturday was Tynemouth Park. We frequented this last summer in the early days of my pregnancy. A lifestyle of eating and drinking on a weekend took a quick u turn when a panic-stricken husband was desperately finding things to do to entertain his sober, now insanely food-fussy wife.

So Friday evenings were spent with me losing at the Lost Adventure Golf – alternated with losing copious amounts of two pennies in the nearby Whitley Bay arcades.

Thankfully on this visit, my appetite was fully restored and I wasn’t subjected to an ass whooping at the golf. Baby in tow, we went straight for bacon (and sausage) sarnies at the Clock Tower Café. They were delightful; both on brown buns and plenty of meat on them. We didn’t realise until after we ordered that if we wanted any sauces that they cost extra (25p each) so I trooped on back to the counter to grab a couple of these.

Washing it down with a filter coffee with warm milk (and a can of coke for the hot-drink-a-phobic that is the other half), we were both eyeing up the new Pirate Quest maze (can’t wait to take Ella bells in there when she’s older).

I wiped the crumbs off my jeans and the sauce off my face (I’m worse than a child) and we headed to show Ella the golf and the Jungle Wipeout.

Not that she was particularly interested.

She was just pleased with herself that she’d managed to ‘negotiate’ with her dad not going back in her pram. A sign of things to come I suppose. Daddy’s. Little. Finger.

So we walked around the Boating Lake, me pushing an empty pram (still good exercise with an overstuffed changing bag attached) and the OH carrying a smug Ella. We remembered to stop and take some pictures this time as we’re usually rubbish at capturing family outings.

We passed a really cute old couple out walking their dog. They were so happy and content, when we walked by the old man grinned ‘you’ve got a better job than I have’ he said to hubby as he motioned to the dog tugging on his lead. The old man was on doggy toilet duties bless him – I was tempted to say he should see the state of Ella’s nappies. Or worse still, the tornado like explosions that splatter her clothing. Which normally happen in public (the Zoo in the lakes, a visit into work blah blah blah).

Not today though.

Phew.

We’d done it! Five months on and it’s still a pat on the back to escape unscathed from any embarrassing baby-related incidents. Hurrah!

Our Saturday morning snaffling and cruising along the coast was a success!

For the record this blog isn’t always going to be about maternity and baby stuff – I get bored so I’m writing about what’s going on in my life. Which other than keeping a small human alive and successfully getting us both up and out of the house every day, doesn’t really consist of much.

So here’s my ramblings about my Maternity Makeup Must-haves.

Forgot to take the label off the mascara and wipe the smear off the lip gloss lid ooops. I’m not taking the picture again (it’s dark now – so the lighting’s not right haha).

Obviously the ultimate factor drummed into you from the moment that embryo attaches itself to your uterus is that you will never have time for yourself again. Ever.

I jest – if you’re pregnant with your first please don’t panic.

You will.

It’s hard and it takes time to get a balancing act going but you will nail it. Those first few new-born days are a whirlwind.

I know it may be the last thing on your mind but to me it was psychological.

If I could manage a shower and to put a bit of slap on everyday, I was ready to take on anything – including a nocturnal baby who had just found her vocal chords.

Maybelline Lash Sensational Luscious Mascara with oil blend – Makes you instantly feel human as it frames but disguises your hideously tired eyes. Oh – and it also withstands any happy/hysterical tears. It’s just a bit of a buggar to take off (might want to leave this one until you’ve got a bit more energy to scrub your face on a night time). I was scraping the last of my Mac Extended Play lash at the beginning of Mat leave and once that died I used my good old Boots points to try this one. It’s actually my fave mascara yet!

Mac Powder Blush in Melba – Instant injection of humanity in my face. Nothing screams healthy and glowing like a good Mac blush – especially handy on those days where you feel like death.

Benefit Browzings – even if you just do your brows you’ll feel like you’re winning at life. Kit includes mini tweezers, pigmented wax and a natural powder

I know the above may seem a lot of effort when you’ve got a wee one and I don’t always wear all of it. But this is my basic kit and I mix and match it up depending on the day/weather/activity. Honestly, a bit of mascara and lippy can make you feel like you can conquer the world.

My teen years were a bit unkind and left me with a few lovely silvery stripes in various places. From the moment that pregnancy test was positive I was straight to Boots racking up the points (they come in handy when your SMP kicks in!) on Stretchmark potions.

It smells great, absorbs well and leaves your skin silky smooth. I still use it now in hope the ‘Bounce Back’ will blitz my uh-hum baby (easter egg) fat. Psst it’s also on offer for £6.99 at the mo instead of £10.49 so if you’re pregnant I highly recommend stocking up. I used to order online and go and pick up in bulk at the Boots Pharmacy in Blyth.

Another product I invested in (it’s a bit steep in price at £69.95 but I was obsessed and sucked in by these things) is Secret Saviours.

You get a day cream to lather on and then wear a fancy bump band that has suction pads on to hold your skin in place. This band was a god send to me as it provides under bump and lower back support. I’ve got a bit of a shitty back with me being so lanky. Plus a physio once told me I have weak back muscles. I clearly didn’t take heed to this advice and do enough exercises to support my own body, let alone grow a small human.

Team that with the sexy Maternity Belt from Jojo Maman Bebe and big Primarni knickers I was a treat for anyone with a warped Pregnancy S&M fetish.

Image from Jojo Maman Bebe website

Hot stuff. I’m so pleased I was pregnant over the autumn and winter months so I could hide all that crap.

Secret Saviours also comes with a night time lotion that smells of lavender, which you can lovingly massage onto your bump (or quickly rub in after you’ve rolled into bed).

I bought this at the beginning of December when I was about twenty five weeks pregnant and the bottles lasted me for about ten weeks. I didn’t bother buying any more as I got towards the end (you can buy the bottles separately) and just relied on Bounce Back Body Butter.

I also went through the odd bottle of Bio Oil as well as Mummy and Me cream from Boots too.

I’m not saying these are miracle workers but all of them combined seemed to be my weapons in the stretchmark battle – touch wood I’ve escaped thus far.

Either that or it was just massaging Aldi’s Lacura Dry Body lotion (about a quid a bottle) into my stomach for the past five years.

Before I begin I’d like to state that I’m a full on subscriber to Birchbox and I’m not receiving anything for this blogpost. For all you ladies out there, especially those of you on Mat Leave – this one’s for you.

I’m hitting the brassic time of Mat Leave where every penny counts. Yawn. I shouldn’t complain as I’m lucky to be allowed nine months off. I saw an Instagram post yesterday of a friend in America who was going back to work after twelve weeks.

So, other than sporadically now spending my Boots points on makeup (which I accumulated buying all the baby crap) I’ve subscribed to Birchbox.

Once a month, I receive a little box through the post (exciting! I love receiving post).

This month they came in a fabulous dove grey neoprene Scuba Birchbag with a range of four cool neon accents. The bag is super handy as either an everyday essential make-up bag or a travel bag for your jolly hols beauty products.

For those in the mammy tribe who carry a changing bag – this Scuba Birchbag is an ideal size to fit inside and slip your own essentials in.

August’s products are definitely one for the mammy tribe too – check this lot out:

Philip Kingsley One More Day Dry Shampoo – need I say more

Merci Handy antibacterial hand cleansing gel – a given

Balance Me Congested Skin Serum – skin sos is a necessity

Anatomicals Body Scrub – ‘brimming with energising grapefruit’ ‘sloughs away dead cells’ – we need all the help we can get

Marcelle Waterproof Eyeliner – just because.

Oh and I nearly forgot – a delightful little sample of a perfume called English Laundry. To mask the smell of baby sick and the likes.

If you subscribe monthly it’s £10 plus £2.95 P&P. Keep an eye out for money off codes on the internet as well as I managed to get my July box for about £6.

You can accumulate points and receive offers for inviting friends to join.

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Lifestyle and Literature ramblings of a geordie gal.
Lover of fizz and all things fictional.
Mother to the Little Lady.
Full time career-loving parent.
Well and truly Winging It.
Sheryl Sandberg and Beyonce are my idols.

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