For some, figuring out that they are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender is a long journey, and for others it's the clearest answer in the world. The next step after this realization involves not only accepting but being proud of who you are. This article will aid you in accepting your LGBTQ+ identity.

Steps

1

Come out to your closest friends. If you're out to supporting friends, they'll love you through it, and they'll aid you in the journey ahead. They'll be a constant reminder of what you want to achieve with yourself—accepting yourself, and all of yourself.

If you have no in-person close friends, try coming out on an online support network. Be sure to use a screen name for safety purposes.

Do not come out if it puts your health or safety at risk. If your parents are potentially abusive, or they might kick you out of the house, do not tell them.

2

Build your support network. For different people, this network will vary; it might be your family, your close friends, or new friends you make in the LGBTQ+ community. Regardless of where you find support, hold onto it and nurture it. As you come out to people or meet new people who seem to accept who you are, fully, work to make them your friends.

3

Surround yourself with media that shows varied sexuality/gender identity in a positive light. While the media once included few gay role models, there are now many more shows and movies that highlight LGBTQ+ individuals and culture in a positive or neutral way; focus on those, and ignore media that still relies on stereotypes or even ridicule for a laugh.

If a show you like starts making bigoted jokes and upsetting you, quit following it. It is not worth the emotional pain. Find an LGBTQIA-friendly show instead.

Ask LGBT+ people on the internet for recommendations.

4

Keep a journal. Journals can be great outlets for all kinds of emotion, from negative to positive. If you're having a bad day and need to vent, write it down. If you're feeling proud and happy about how accepting your friends are or how amazing your newest crush is, write it down. It helps to get your feelings out, and you can refer back to your positive points when you need to be cheered up.

5

Realize you are normal and can live a very happy life. Members of the LGBTQ+ community find partners, have families, thrive in their careers, and can enjoy all of life's ups (and downs), just like anyone else. Watch coming out stories on YouTube, as well as read coming out advice on the internet. Realize this is your human condition, this is how you were made, and it's awesome. By looking into coming out, you'll see that most - not all - LGBT members have acceptance when they come out. Remember, if you embark on that process, make sure it's safe and a good time to do so.

6

Get rid of the bigots in your life. The problem is with them, not with you. Be selective about who you let into your life. If they're a drain on your energy or make you feel worse about your identity, don't invite them in, metaphorically or literally.

Alternatively, you can try to have a discussion with them about it and see if they'll consider opening their mind. But don't do this at the expense of your own happiness. If they're adamant about their beliefs, don't wear yourself out by arguing. Drop them.

If you can't get rid of them (e.g. they are your parents), keep your distance. Do what you need to do to protect your mental health—you are not obligated to spend time with people who damage your self-esteem. Leave as soon as you are able.

7

Embrace your identity. Recognize that it is okay to be who you are, and there is nothing defective or immoral about you. You are okay—every single part of you, including your gender identity and sexual orientation.

Start taking steps towards being more open. You may begin feeling much better.

Even if you are stuck in the closet, you can still love yourself. Embrace positive media, network with other LGBTQIA people, and practice radical self-love.

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Coming out can be very challenging, especially when you are young. Have a discussion in a quiet place with both of your parents, tell them who you are and that you know you experience love just like everyone else.

It's recommended that you separate yourself from them. If they harass you outside of church, take legal action. Nobody deserves that. If you are religious, consider becoming a member of an LGBTQ-friendly church.

If they do, then they're wrong and you have the opportunity to educate them about what bisexuality really is. Most likely though, your friends will love and accept you for who you are rather than questioning your sexuality.

I want to tell my grandma that I'm pansexual but she says nasty things about people attracted to both genders. Any advice?

wikiHow Contributor

If your parents/close family know that you are out, then you can ask them for help on the matter. However, I would ask myself why I wanted to talk to my grandma about my sexuality. I'm not sure that's a conversation you really need to have. You could just introduce whoever you are dating as "my girlfriend/boyfriend" and leave it at that.

I am scared to tell my best friend that I am bi. I am afraid she will tell her parents and we'll lose our friendship. I don't like her that way. What should I do?

SakuraUmi

Try to see if you can figure out her standpoint on the LGBT+ community. If she's okay with it and/or supports it, then feel free to tell her. If she's truly your friend she would keep it as secret (make sure you ask her not to tell anyone). If she does tell, and you lose the friendship, she wasn't a very good friend in the first place because she didn't respect your wishes.

I'm 14. My school is Catholic, will it be safe for me to come out as bi?

wikiHow Contributor

It might be risky. Religious schools aren't generally known as the most accepting. You might want to ask around and try to find out if there are any actual rules/regulations on the subject. Most of the time, LGBTQ+ students aren't expelled or anything, but there may be policies against dating someone of the same sex, bringing them to school dances, etc.

Tips

Dress as you like, and ignore those who think clothes are somehow linked to sexuality.

Confide in your friends when you're conflicted about your identity. They'll serve as a means to cheer you up, as well as a source of constant support.

Know you're not alone. Many others identify the same as you and are living happy lives. You can too.

Come out to your parents if it's safe. They can lead you to accepting yourself.

Take advantage of the countless self-help sources on the internet.

If you ever need to, phone the Trevor Project. "Our trained counselors are here to support you 24/7. If you are a young person who is in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgment-free place to talk, call The Trevor Lifeline now at 866-488-7386." "A national 24-hour, toll free confidential suicide hotline for gay and questioning youth."

Warnings

Never come out in a situation that could put your safety at risk.

Coming out in public can cause bullies to take notice and attack you. This is not your fault, but unfortunately the burden lies upon you to stay safe.