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Monday, March 2, 2015

What constitutes genuine love? I was
sitting contemplating what to do for the hubby on Valentines (yes ladies
Valentines isn’t just about you), when it hit me for this article. What’s the
difference between sex and love? Is there a distinction between the two? Or do
they coincide and work together to create a fulfilling experience?

We all know what the scientists have to
say. At our most basic level, we as humans, need to reproduce, and at a
certain point in our lives we feel that need more than ever. Our biological
time clock ticks the loudest when we’re at our peak of reproductive life. Our
bodies change when we’re on the prowl for the opposite sex. It’s proven that
women and men have an unspoken agenda whether they consciously realize it or
not. The pheromones are strong and the sexual urge even stronger. These two
factors along with several other measurable physical changes occur when we seek
the opposite sex for procreation. But what about the love? How does amour fit
into the bigger scheme of things? Does an attraction automatically constitute love?

Initially, when we’re in love the grass
seems greener doesn’t it. The birds chirp just slightly louder, and we feel like
we’re on cloud nine. We become invincible. And when we actually have sex
with the other person, we’ve fallen so deeply for, the bond seems complete. The beginning is great due to the chemical changes, but in time the chemical euphoria wears off. Have you
ever had someone tell you: “I do love you, but I don’t love you like that any
more.” Or my personal favourite, the one line that really stings. “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” Yeah, and you can bet, I kicked his ass to the curb when that left his lips,especially when I found out he was cheating. Then there are those people who are actually in love
with the idea of being in love. Okay, been there done that, when I was sixteen. I
still romanticize of course. I still like the feeling of being love and the
ideal side of it all, but now my outlook has become more realistic.

What happens when the chemical wears off?
Well, this is what I think. Nothing. Yep, you heard me, a big, fat zero. I think if you’re genuinely in love with that person
the love doesn’t just wear off. Oh maybe that first bit of excitement does, the
titillation, and he or she can walk on
water shit, but the real thing doesn’t. So obviously love is a deeper bond than just screwing.

The truth is we need
that bond. Children require both parents. Mother Nature has reasons for
creating us the way she did. Think about it tomorrow when you gaze upon the one
you’re smitten with. Remind yourself why you fell heal over heals with him or
her. Say it. Don’t be shy. Enjoy the life you’ve created together. Wine and
dine each other and yes…kiss, hug, and make love! I don’t believe the
love actually dies, I just believe we forget why we fell in love with one
another. Regardless whether it's Valentine's Day or Easter or even Christmas, you have to remind each other why you're together.

Now, I’ll let you in on a little secret. Men
love Valentine's Day just as much as we do, ladies. I know they say it doesn’t
matter and we’re the ones that matter, and I say BULLSHIT!

True Story~

Several
years ago, I wandered into the local grocery story and purchased a dozen red roses,
one personalized cake with a chocolate heart on top, lottery
tickets, a card and some heart chocolates. Then I got in line for the till.
This is no word of a lie and I swear on Grandma’s grave.

The teller says, “Wow you’re mom will be
thrilled with all the gifts.”

There were two other women standing behind
me: a black lady and an Asian lady (they were hilarious, pretending not to
listen in).

I looked at the teller and said, “These
aren’t for my mother. They’re for my husband.”

You should’ve seen the horrified look on
her face. The other two women were all ears at this point, almost leaning into
me.

“Well I don’t think a woman should be
buying her husband stuff for Valentines,” the teller exclaimed.

“And why the hell not?” I asked. “I love him
and he deserves a little recognition.”

God as my witness, this was her reply. “It
just isn’t right. The man should dote on the woman. I’d never do it for mine.
He doesn’t do it for me.”

No shit he didn’t bother with her,
considering her attitude. This woman was in her late fifties and not a
prize, I hate to say.

“Aww that’s a shame, no relationship should
be like that,” I said. “Married long?”

“Thirty years.”

“Maybe if you pampered him once in a while
you’d get the same in return. It works for me--the sex is awesome and I get it
every night if I want.”

The teller went bright red and the other
two women were grinning like kids in a candy shop. Next thing I knew, the two
women dispersed and returned seconds later with all sorts of goodies in hand,
telling me they’d try anything once if it meant more sex! LOL