They discovered the unconditional love of those who were not Mormons

We wish to remain anonymous, but you are welcome to include our story
on your page. My husband and I were both raised in staunch Mormon
families. After more than a year of reading, questioning, and
discussing some historical documents found in the archives of the
church, we have come to the point where we recently requested our names
be removed from the records of the Mormon church.

Several issues have been of most importance for us during this difficult
time of separation. First is the realization that we have been anything
but Christian. The Mormon theology is so completely judgmental, that
through direct or indirect teaching, members believe that they are more
blessed (therefore better) than anyone who is not a member. Much
service is rendered to fellow Mormons; but more often than not,
non-members receive service only in hopes that they will someday be
converted to the faith. It was a huge eye-opener when we moved away
from Utah and had neighbors who had such unconditional love for us, and
for everyone in their lives, that I was yanked out of my vainglorious
pretense. I felt like a spiritual ant next to them. And yet when I
went to Mormon meetings I kept hearing the missionary push to "lift
people up" and "share with them", "we have so much", blah, blah, blah.
I had totally missed the boat. I didn't have crap next to my neighbors.

One thing we never realized about ourselves when we were Mormons was how
little control we had of our lives. We thought we were in control. We
were taught to be self-reliant and truth-seeking (but only within the
limits of the church's doctrine.) Only when we left the church did we
realize how we'd been duped. They make it so easy not to think for
yourself in the Mormon church. There is an answer for every question.
Your entire life is planned out for you and your children. Your
afterlife is even planned out.

We felt like we had to "throw the baby out with the bath water" since
our trust in authority and ourselves was completely devastated.
Everything was suspect. How can you trust your own judgment when you
have received (what you thought to be) personal revelation that the
Mormon church and its prophets were true? All of the big cosmic
questions have no answers for us now. It has been hard for us to decide
the smallest things; it is all so overwhelming. We deal with
depression; grief for the loss of support; deep sadness for hurting
people we love; and anger for being deceived. However, we have no
interest in "proselytizing" what we have found. We do not wish this hell
on anyone. Indeed it is far easier to remain a Mormon in ignorance.

The bottom line is that we are now trying to find purpose in our lives
day to day. The level of dependence in the Mormon church is truly
frightening. Isn't it sad that we struggle with the idea of just being
good people? We have also realized that there is no way to argue any of
the church's responses to our apostasy. "We must not have been strong
enough in our testimonies," etc. We will go on with our lives in spite
of "being made an example", trying to take the best from what we have
learned, and live knowing that if nothing else, we have integrity.