Drinking Spouses

Gold Member

Sometimes I drink too much. Sometimes my wife accepts an offer of drinks for us, beyond good limits. Fortunately, I have been doing better lately, and my wife usually gives me good counsel to keep within my limits.

Since keeping within my limits needs continual monitoring and cooperation, I thought I would start this thread, for positively discussing the struggles, strategies, successes and falures of relationship dynamics for avoiding over-imbibing in intoxicants.

Gold Member

I ask, what is too much for you, and why the concern? What happens when you have too much? Whose opinion is it that you drink too much?

-FC

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My problem is not that too many people tell me to stop drinking. My problem is that too many peple are ENCOURAGING me to drink MORE.

I have one extended family member who loves to drink wine. He says it is good for your health to drink wine. So the way he says it, is that if I don't drink some more wine, I am bound to get sick and have ILL HEALTH. It is hard to refuse his logic.

Another of my extended family members, loves to drink a 6 pack of beer. He offers me a beer, "Wouldn't you LOVE to have a BEER?" Like he does not really feel that he is even ALIVE if he is not drinking beer. So he makes me feel like I might as well be dead, if I refuse to drink another beer.

If I start drinking, then is easier for me to drink more. So I try to avoid starting, so as to avoid the third drink. I get silly and say insensitive comments. Not that even when I am sober, that I am so suave and sensitive.

Gold Member

Oh I get it. Just turn them down. There are theories that a glass of red wine is good for your circulatory system and your heart, but that is ONE glass. Now, if I have one glass, I am likely to have two. Two is half a bottle, so I am likely to finish the bottle......

If you don't want to get to that third drink, stop at one. If you cannot stop at one, just don't drink at all if you don't want to get buzzed.

I don't have a spouse anymore so I drink alone. :eek

As for those drinking relatives that push you, just laugh them off. They cannot make you feel anything, you are responsible for that. Tell them peer pressure died in high school!

Gold Member

The problem is that they have a problem and don't want to be alone. The more they can convince others to join them the more they will feel better (normal).

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I think Igor hit it on the head. A few years back, when I was playing guitar in bars I got tired of seeing how dumb the drunks acted, and quit drining totally for a while. One woman tried to buy me a drink on a break. When I told her "I don't drink," she replied, "That's Stupid." My wife, ex now, was really happy when I had a drink with her and started having a few beers again. She ended up with a serious alcohol and drug problem. The sex was better with her when she was tipsy though.