Adventures, Culinary and Otherwise of a New Life In a Small Town

I like making lists and I cannot lie

Hello and Happy Year of the Goat… I freakin LOVE LOVE goats, I had a goat as a pet once her name was Gabby and she lived in our house, and she loved to eat everything but most of all banana chips. She was super friendly and would cuddle on the couch and chase us around the house.

One night my mother and her boyfriend at the time,Marco Vassi a well known pornographer, who oddly enough spent the last years of his life living next door to me in NYC, were having a drumming party, this being the 70’s they were rather the thing to do. At one point during the drumming a speaker fell and hit Marco in the head, an ambulance was called… when the ambulance arrived they found several people drumming and dancing in circles around a man bleeding from the head and a goat. It is a wonder child protective services were not called.

I hope everyone had the Valentines Day they wanted to have.

I finally got my hair cut, its shorter than I planned but it was very dry, its very dry here

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So V-Day was nice, Xtian bought me red roses even though I wanted orange rose and a heart shaped box of chocolates, the box of chocolates was fun because I like to take a bite out of every one and then put them back, it’s something I used to do with my Grandma Bella. She had a secret stash in the silverware drawer and every so often we’d bite and discard chocolates and feel like Elizabeth Taylor. When they are very good chocolates I feel bad wasting them.

I got him a bottle of bourbon and some ear plugs and a Groupon for a whiskey tasting, plus I made him a card and some special chocolates. Ok, so maybe I am just good at giving gifts but no so good at the receiving of gifts, this is a constant theme.

That night during the not blizzard we went out for Scorpion Bowls and Pu-Pu Platters which was totally fun!

On Sunday we lay about like walruses and watched a ridiculous amount of television… including Broad Citywhich is amazing and brilliant and I love those two crazy Jewish Girls so much!!!!

We also watched the six hundred hour long SNL 40th anniversary show which was just really more sad than funny, the Californians skit just sucked and went on for way longer than it needed to, there was probably much smarter funnier way to get Bradley Cooper & Betty White to make out, and uch Sarah Palin that asshole, at least she looked terrible. Bill Murray was great, of course, he is the funniest person on the planet and even though I do not know he seems like a pretty great guy..a real mensch.(if you need evidence of that read THIS)

TV watching snackThis Week’s MenuRice Bowls moved to Wed to Thurs because of Chinese New year..also we had dumplingsMonday Nights Pizza which I changed to Zucchini & Mushroom

But I digress. Lists, I LOVE to make lists. I make shopping lists, and activities lists and things to do lists and sometimes just random lists of things like flavors of ice cream I would make if I had an ice cream shop:

White Chocolate Curry

Carrot Cake

Bitter Chocolate Bergamot

Pink Peppercorn Peppermint

Roasted Banana Walnut

Coconut Cream Pie

Toasted Almond/Caramelized Almonds

Burnt Vanilla/Pink Grapefruit

Honey Sherbet

Coffee Molasses

Sometime I make lists of words I like

Affenpincher

Stroopwaffel

Pamplemousse

Asinine

Uxorious

Strachiatella

Babushka

Luxe

Indubitably

Or of things that I want to fix the house

Repaint cabinets that blue color or something cool because I HATE THEM

BOOKSHELVES

Curtains every where

Curtains in dressing room

Chair in dressing room (BD couch??)

Do Stuff to Kitchen island(pegboard, baskets, hooks)

Throw out everything

Hang pictures

Glitter eggs

Shopping lists are my favorite, right now I have one going for a trip to Trader Joe’s, always a bit of an event because in theory there are only 5 or 6 things there that I don’t want, and only 10 or so that I actually need at any given time. And my editing skills are such that even though I know editing usually means removing items/word I always seem to end up with more…

I have dreamed of these and now they are a reality

This is the practical (ish) version of the list, things we need in the house that we use or have run out of that are cheaper, better or only at Trader Joe’s

Olive Oil

Capers

Almond butter

Wine (case)-NOT 2 Buck Chuck that is total shite- however Revolution Chandonnay and Pontificus Cotes Du Rhone blends are great and LESS THAN $8 a bottle, also they have a totally drinkable German sparkling wine for like $

Sherry (dry)- for cooking, $4 natch

Vermouth (white)

Coconut oil

Pizza dough

Cheese – Parm, Cheddar, Mozz, Goat, String

Brown rice

Risotto Rice

Gerolsteiner water

Kale sprouts

Bacon

San Marzano tomatoes

Whole wheat pitas

Quinoa

Tulips

Aaaaand then there’s the other list, the stuff I want list. This stuff that’s better at or only at TJ’s or they don’t have it at our supermarket and I’m not paying Whole Foods Prices for it…. but it’s all stuff we can do without.

Truffled Marcona almonds

Pretzel bagels

Hazelnut Milk

Dates

Meyer Lemons

Amaretti cookies

Ghee

TJ’s Salsa Verde

Everything Crackers

Frozen Dumplings

Frozen Scallion Pancakes

Frozen Shrimp

Frozen Artichoke Hearts

Frozen Wild Mushroom Mix

Frozen Root Veg Strips

Lemon Curd

Cara Cara Oranges

Tahini Sauce

Marscapone

Smoked Salmon

Kouign Amman

Then there are the things I would pick up if we weren’t going to go to the regular supermarket

And this is why Christian has a fucking heart attack walking through the doors, I’m at probably $250-300 which is a helluva a lot more than we usually spend on groceries, though a lot of it is pantry items that will be used throughout the next few months. I can justify anything.

In other news it’s snowing. AGAIN. And I am CRAVING cake, yellow cake with chocolate icing, and I have absolutely no reason to bake a cake like that, nor should I have one in my house and there are NO decent cupcakes of that sort available here in Brunswick, Maine.

What I Miss About Philadelphia

My friends….you know who you are, even if you are not in this picture.