This Website features the
book
"Queen & Freddie Mercury - INNUENDOES"... ISBN
0-9531189-75
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Online... If you have difficulty obtaining this book, please feel free to
write into us, and we will do what we can to help you...

Much
has been written about Freddie Mercury and even Queen - But not all has been
said. This site which is the Official Web Site, contains just some quotes
taken from a book called INNUENDOES (ISBN - 0-9531189-7-5).

Freddie
was born 5th September 1946, his real name was Faroukh Bulsara. Although
there are many different spellings of Freddie's first name Faroukh, this we
have found to be the official spelling, hence us using it. Being born a
Persian, Freddie was also born into the Zoroastrian Faith, and much of his
beliefs surrounding this Faith, have been incorporated into the music of
Queen. This comes under the title of The Lily and Phoenix story - which in
itself, is part of the Queen Concept, which also incorporates the Cosmic
battles between Ahriman and Ahura - as found in such songs as The March Of
The Black Queen. Freddie moved to England with his parents when he was 18
years old, in 1964. Shortly after this, he attended college, where he took
his exams. He became an artist for a children's book, whereby he drew
pictures of Space. But finding this job somewhat constricting, he then went
on into Music, which was were he felt, that he could really fulfil his dreams
and ambitions. A few years after that, came Queen, and the Queen concept
truly began to come to life.

Freddie
died from Aids November 24th 1991, aged 45. A special Zoroastrian Service was
held, and his body was cremated and his Soul set free, as is the custom of
the Zoroastrian Faith.

His
ashes were collected six months later, by Mary Austin. Freddie had asked that
his ashes should be placed underneath the Cherry Tree in his back garden - so
as he jokingly put it "he could keep an eye on everyone".

Much
of Freddie's history has been written about in detail within the book of
INNUENDOES. This includes details of everything from his so-called Cocaine
habit, to his habit of collecting Cats. Although a lot has been written about
Freddie in other books, none talk about the real Freddie - as in the man
behind the mask. So instead of the usual "Pop-Bumf" as found in
most books, INNUENDOES, deals with what made Freddie tick, and what he was
really like as a person. But however, as stated, much of the book has been
written as a Detective Story - whereby you the Reader of the Book, or
Listener of Queen Music, have been left to decide what Freddie's main hopes
and dreams were, where his ambitions were concerned.

For
instance where the Spirit of Lily in connection to the making of music was
concerned, Freddie would have had no problem dealing with the concept of Lily
as a whole. If anything, Freddie would have ran the risk of becoming too
personally involved with the actuality of Lily, as opposed to her remaining simply
an idea or project. But then in all fairness, Freddie was brought up to make
allowances for the fact that there is more to life than that which we see as
being obvious, or of the so-called acceptable norm. For instance, accepting
the fact that the Spiritual Realm is as in everyday life, and that the
Afterlife exists. And as a result, there are many different Forces (Spirits)
at work, anyone of which, could have a bearing on your life - such as with
Lily.

Apart
from parties, and being a Pop-Star, Freddie was notorious for preferring
strange and interesting people. He hated being bored and as such, he showed
his distaste of boring people. He loved interesting conversations and would
spend hours at a time, talking about everything from the Universe, to his
cats, which he treasured like children almost. The makings of the Universe
and subsequent theories were often a basis for serious discussion.

Although
however, it should be pointed out, that Freddie was very particular about who
he chose to talk with about such subjects. As a result, this is possibly one
of the sides to Freddie, that eluded the notice of the public and as a
result, not much is known publicly about Freddie's own personal interests.
Although obviously, the Cosmic Battles and Struggles of his own religion were
of conversational interest, just how much of it he discussed within his own
circle, is all together debatable.

For
instance, within one circle of his friends, the subjects covered, would only consist
of musical terms, whilst another group of friends, would be allowed so-called
light banter. As for the lengths to which Lily was discussed, is again
debatable. Often questions would arise, as to just what the meanings and
implications of such statements as "The Phoenix rising from the
Ashes" were, but more often than not, instead of giving a direct
explanation, Freddie would simply shake his head, and then walk off.

But
then considering the nature of this book, it is hardly surprising really, is
it? As for the actual involvement of Queen themselves, again personally I
would say that they did not understand the full implications of what Freddie
was planning to do, or perhaps that is just wishful thinking. Take for
instance, when Freddie died. When the question - "How long have you
known that Freddie had AIDS". The answers from the same person
questioned, ranged from anything from a few months, to years. Such was the
security of secrets held. But even though the Lily concept was totally different,
it seems that it was equally as private.

And
even if she did turn in, and say "Guess what people, here I am and this
is what I know", no one would stand up for her - would they, or would
they? And even if they did stand up for her, what could they do. Just imagine
if you were Lily; and were the one writing down all of this information; in a
book just like INNUENDOES. How would you make yourself known if no-one knows
about you and the people who do know, use the excuse that they can't be seen
to be interfering. So much for secrets held - it kind of backfires doesn't
it! So much for planting seeds - And as for Lily, well it looks as though
she's been left to stand-alone.

But
then you know what they say - There's no point in owning up to something that
technically doesn't exist - After all Lily doesn't exist, she's only a
Spirit. It's a case of the old adage - What you don't know, I don't have to
worry about or divulge. There is another adage however, that states - Never
talk about a plan, in case it doesn't work, so nothing is lost, and nothing
is gained. It's a slight case of Damned if you do, and Damned if you
don't.

And
anyway, the chances are that even if Freddie had explained that he had AIDS,
or had explained the concept of Lily, and/or he had explained any of his
personal beliefs, people wouldn't have understood him anyway. Because as with
most things, people tend to see only that which suits them and as such, often
get the wrong end of the stick. Needless to say though Freddie still had a
big influence on those around him, even though most of his thoughts, he kept
to himself. And those feelings that he did wish to express publicly such as
with the case of Lily, he left in his music.

Freddie
knew exactly what he wanted from his music, and demanded perfection. And as
such, those around him were often caught up in the frenzy to perfect the
details and sounds of the songs. And if things weren't going right, or a song
seemed to be taking far too long, he would often run the risk of almost
exploding into a fit of anger, which highlighted his frustration as can be
seen on the making of One Vision. The feeling of frustration, was one of
Freddie's biggest problems, and it would often show itself through what most
people would term as a temper tantrum. And the older Freddie got, the worst
it got.

He
had been known to smash his forehead against a brick wall, until it bled,
just through frustration. On another occasion, he had been known to
completely smash an entire porcelain dinner set, which was worth thousands of
pounds, just through a fit of rage. Although in later years, he did begin to
calm down, it was only during the last three years of his life that he
finally calmed down.

Most
of this inner frustration, was caused by the knowledge of having AIDS and not
being about to do anything about it, or tell anyone about it - But some of
his frustrations did come from other quarters. Freddie was often known to go
off on one, for no apparent reason at all, and this would often get blamed -
as mentioned earlier in the INNUENDOES book, on his so-called Female
Counterpart - better known as Lily - be it joke or coincidence. But then to
pull on foreign affairs, can sometimes have diverse effects, which is why
this explanation was used by Freddie.

In
Spiritual terms, "To Pull On", means to pull down, or drawn in - In
other words, to be influenced by. To put this into more understandable terms,
it can be likened to someone who is religious and pulls on GOD (say by
praying) and then receives influence. Or take for instance, a young child who
pulls on an older brother, and as such gains influence from that older
brother. It should be pointed out however, that even if you do seek advice
from other quarters, it is still for you to make the final judgement. Say for
instance, your brother says go and steal a car - It's still for you to know
better. And even where GOD is concerned, if it's wrong, then you know that
GOD is only testing your morals. This is known as an Ahriman or a Trick of
Ahriman, which is set to test you.

The
diverse effects that Lily seemingly had on Freddie, ranged from everything
such as pretending to be pregnant (which was only a joke at the time), to
mood swings and displays of strange behaviour - he called it, living in
someone's pocket. Just out of interest, if you have a close relationship with
a Spirit, you might have shared dreams and experiences, which might account
for the fact that Freddie nearly strangled a girlfriend (Barbara) in his
sleep. It took several people to pull him off her throat - such was the
frenzy of his dream, and the frenzy of Lily's experience perhaps.

This
so-called relationship with Lily, has been termed in the Fairy Tale as
Freddie Breast Feeding himself - a term as used in such songs as Life Is
Real. Other than that, Lily is referred to as a Cat (as in Queen = female
cat). But however, perhaps the most important point to add about Lily, is the
fact that Lily is a real person, as in a living person. And as such, many of
the experiences that Lily had, were shared by Freddie, and visa-versa - hence
Freddie's piss-take of Lily being Pregnant. As for the actual kind of
relationship he had or has with Lily as the case may be, it's known as a
Love/hate relationship.

In
many ways, it would be unfair to take direct quotes out of the book of
INNUENDOES where Freddie's actual real life story is concerned. This in the main
is due to the fact that if a quote were used for this Web Site, it would then
be taken out of context, because as stated, most of this book deals with the
"Man behind the Mask" as in the real Freddie. But perhaps one of
the most prominent quotes as taken from this book, goes as so -

"Once
the party's over and you are left in the dark, life is still the same, ever
diminishing, but never finishing - So much for the Throne".