Fuck you, Johnny Walker. The only thing women find scary about scotch is that it can lead to unwanted pregnancies that grow up to head advertising campaigns as myopic and shameful as yours. Boycotting.

I’d be the first to admit there’s some right weird buggers here in Brum – but drinking your own pee, and washing your face and hair with your piss, because you think it has health benefits and will keep you young looking ?