For what seemed like eternity, Nia Vardalos was battling Isis. And the ancient Egyptian goddess of fertility and motherhood emerged victorious every time.

Vardalos had dedicated years to the elusive goal of becoming pregnant and having her own biological child. Numerous painful, bruise-inducing IVF attempts failed. So did surrogacy.

The two were matched with, and ultimately became the parents of, a 3-year-old, a product of the domestic foster system. Her daughter, Ilaria, whose name she reveals publicly for the first time, is now 8. And Vardalos, 50, unflinchingly, honestly and sweetly chronicles her saga in Instant Mom, part maternal memoir, part how-to guide, out Tuesday.

"I have met so many people who think you have to be so pretty and famous and go to another country to find a child. Madonna and Angelina Jolie have broken so many myths about adopting from another country and I commend them for it," Vardalos says. "But there's a way to do it here. I wanted to talk about all the ways that worked for me and show all the ways to adopt."

Look around the entertainment industry, and you'll see just how many celebrities have adopted.

Charlize Theron announced her adoption of son Jackson last March. Sandra Bullock is raising Louis alone, and she famously revealed him to the world on the cover of People magazine after winning her Oscar. Jolie and Brad Pitt have a brood of six, three of whom are adopted: Zahara (Ethiopia), Maddox (Cambodia) and Pax (Vietnam). Denise Richards domestically adopted infant daughter Eloise, and Edie Falco did the same with Anderson and Macy. Madonna has David and Mercy, from Malawi. Sex and the City's Willie Garson adopted a son as a single dad, like Vardalos through the foster system.

"I think the public has the impression that celebrities have an edge on and get breaks with everything, including adoption," says adoption expert Devon Brooks, an associate professor of social work at the University of Southern California. "Having said that, I don't think the public has the impression that celebrities who adopt get to break all the laws and rules. The American public is inspired by celebrity adoptions because they epitomize the American experience."

To some it may appear that an actor goes from tentatively espousing in interviews that he or she wants to be a parent, to having a baby. So the myth persists that if you're rich and famous, you can bypass the legal and procedural roadblocks. Not true, Vardalos says.

"In some ways, (being a celebrity) made it harder because of the prejudice of the kid being able to be anonymous. I don't know any way that it made it easier," she says. "We do get free stuff. We get a lot of purses and clothes. I'm not going to pretend that we don't get perks. But when it came to something so sensitive, we were treated like the average humans we are. When Sandra Bullock announced baby Louis, they'd been waiting for years."

Bullock has explained just how intricate and painstaking her road to motherhood really was, telling NBC in 2010 that "I wanted to do everything exactly the same way everyone else did." In fact, celebrity adoption is nothing new. Diane Keaton, Kirstie Alley, Jamie Lee Curtis and Mia Farrow are all adoptive moms. It's just much more publicized these days.

"America is a country that adopts more children than any other country. But the regular folks don't make the news," says Chuck Johnson, president of the National Council For Adoption. "Celebrities, when they adopt, it's a big deal. There are a lot of celebrities who are adopting, and that's a reflection of society at large."

The reason the public doesn't know about a celebrity adoption in progress is that the process is long, grueling and detailed, and if often involves heart-pounding disappointments. So you won't catch stars blurting out in the media that they're trying to adopt, because it can take years.

'Instant Mom,' a book by Nia Vardalos.(Photo: NONE)

"Looking in from the outside, you can assume a celebrity has an easier time of it because they don't talk about it," Richards says. And suddenly they have a baby, and you wonder, 'How did they get a baby so fast? But there are so many steps and everything has to get done."

Some sketchy people do offer their services, at a cost. Vardalos, honest to a fault, recounts in her book how a Hollywood lawyer told her that for a fee, she could jump to the front of the baby-waiting list. "It made me nauseous," she says.

Yet most experts, and parents, insist that being famous helps only in terms of expense. Those with ample bank accounts, regardless of whether they're on magazine covers or not, are able to work with lawyers to help navigate the system, and keep the process undercover to protect both the child and the birth family.

"I would say that anybody who has resources may have an easier time," Brooks says. "They have the money. Celebrities have resources to hire someone who could find all the adoption agencies that let them adopt privately. They're able to do that. And say the child was in another state; the person with resources is able to pick up and fly around the country in a way that most people can't."

In fact, the more famous your name, the more scrutinized your adoption may be.

"I was able to hire an attorney who was able to help me with the process. With that said, there wasn't a step skipped because of it. I did all the home studies, the medical, the interviews, the classes, the letters. It's not like a celebrity can make a phone call," says Richards, whose youngest daughter is almost 2. "You have to take all the steps you need to take. They are very diligent. The wait is challenging. Once she was born, keeping the privacy of it all was a little challenging. If I talk to people who want to adopt, the biggest challenge is the waiting and wondering if you're going to be connected with a birth family."

But obviously, having a solid bottom line helps, regardless of whether you're Angelina or just Angie. An adoption can cost $35,000 to $50,000. On the flip side, folks without famous last names can openly attend workshops, create online portfolios and meet prospective birth mothers without anyone being the wiser.

"People aren't buying babies because they're celebrities," Brooks says. "Certain things have to be done. There has to be a home study. A social worker has to be involved. People take their jobs seriously. People care about the kids and they are fully aware of what could happen if someone has rules bent and then something tragic were to happen."

For the most part, celebrity adoptions are closed, meaning the birth parents don't know by name who adopted their biological offspring.

"Nobody knew who I was, except the lawyer, and he certainly wasn't telling anybody," Falco says. "It might have been different if the respective birth mothers had been told, you know, (whispers) 'It's Edie Falco.' But that might have made it more likely for them to want me to adopt their kid, or less. I don't know."

Richards, too, kept her process undercover. " I was pretty private about it," she says. "The people who do the home studies were with the agency, and everything is confidential."

And when she brought Eloise home, she stayed indoors, mostly, so the baby could bond with her sisters, Sam and Lola (from Richards' marriage to Charlie Sheen). "We had Eloise hidden for a month. I finally couldn't hide her anymore. It got too stressful to get to the pediatrician, and I wanted to go out with her. I loved that first month we had with her."

Actress Nia Vardalos offers her tips for looking good at 50 and for taming her "rack."

Richards says she never specified gender or race. And while she waited to be matched with her child, quite a few possibilities didn't pan out.

"It's very up and down and disappointing. I had to have faith that the right baby would find us. Obviously she did," Richards says. "I wanted to keep it very private, and sometimes that can take longer. Some couples will build websites and network. I didn't want to do that. I wanted to protect the birth family and myself and the baby. There were situations where the birth family decided to keep the baby or go with a mom and dad (instead of a single parent). When you get close to having your son or daughter, it can be such a heartbreak."

Falco says her quest for parenthood was smoother, even though she, like Richards, adopted as a solo mom both times. "I did one step at a time. I put one foot in front of the other. I didn't know how long it would take. I was not on a time table. I just thought, I'll start this process and see what happens," she says. "From finishing the paperwork to getting Anderson was a year. And with Macy it was like a year and a half."

As for Vardalos, she'd like to be an instant mom again — if it's meant to be. "We're on every list still. So the phone could ring, but it hasn't. I'm staying in the moment and not thinking ahead."