NOFX… the
men, the myth, the mildew…From their beginnings as a snot-core band in
1983 through personnel changes (they've managed to retain three out of
the four original members) and personal growth, NOFX continues to evolve.
With their new release, Ribbed, they've achieved their most powerful sound
yet. Set to embark on a third European tour in April, we caught up with
singer/bassist Mike and tossed around questions of philosophy and Fat.
Interview by Emily Soares and Devon Morf.

MRR:Do you think that working with Epitaph has
changed NOFX’s sound at all?The
production values sound so high.

Fat
Mike:I don’t think our sound has changed, but our
music has a bit. Brett put a lot of money into the record this time around.
We spent a lot of time in the studio. We didn’t necessarily want to, it’s
just that my vocals were so bad we had to spend more time on them. I’d
never sung so bad before.

MRR:I thought you sounded good.

Fat
Mike:It sounds good now because I spent so much
time singing a lot of different takes.

MRR:Who did all the band’s background vocals? At
times it almost sounds like you had Sha Na Na in the studio with you.
(laughter)

Fat
Mike:Steve, our guitarist, did most of them. His
friend Mark, and Brett did some. Just friends of ours, it’s not like we
had professionals do it for us. We had a horn player too. We tried some
new stuff on this album, but I think it turned out all right.

MRR:“Where’s My Slice” is a song many people might
get misconceptions about. Would you care to expand on what transpires
in that song?

Fat
Mike:I wrote it about a friend of mine named Eric,
this peace punk guy who lives on welfare lines and government checks.
He doesn’t do shit and he’s always complaining about how the world owes
him a living. He just drinks. He’s always going to demonstrations and
complaining. The guy’s a bum. He’s living off the system, but he doesn’t
do anything. The song is about him. You can also insert different groups
of people into the lyrics and it fits in a general way.I suppose you could put women in it, poor people, some minorities,
basically anybody that hasn’t gotten a fair shake. A whole bunch of different
groups will fit. But I wrote it about a guy named Eric.

MRR:Speaking of peace punks, is your new song “Shower
Days” NOFX’s homage to being crusty? (laughter)

Fat
Mike:No it’s just personal. The other guys in the
band take showers often. It’s just me who hates them. My girlfriend made
a chart she put up in our bathroom. It tells me that every Wednesday and
Saturday I have to take a shower. I have to shave too, and mark it off.

MRR:What about brushing your teeth?

Fat
Mike:I do that every day.

MRR:Do you mark that off?

Fat
Mike:No, no. (laughter)

MRR:Is your song about touring a love song dedicated
to Erin?

Fat
Mike:Yeah. It's kind of a calypso number.

MRR:So you’re gonna cash in on Operation Ivy’s
success?

Fat
Mike:Someone has to cash in on it…they didn’t. Hey,
Operation Ivy were the greatest band, but they’re stupid for breaking
up. Two of our songs are ska-ish, that’s not crossing over. We do a jazzy
song too, “Together on the Sand.”

MRR:Are NOFX sexy, sexist or just plain horn?

Fat
Mike:I’m the least sexist person, really, I make
my girlfriend take out the garbage just as much as me. (laughter) I don’t
make girls do anything I wouldn’t do. I don’t treat them special either.

MRR:What goes on in your song “New Boobs?” That’s
another song that could be misconstrued.

Mike:“New Boobs” is about LA, Eric and Steve know
all these girls that are getting boob jobs. It’s just like the thing to
do. “Oh, Karen got a boob job last week.” It’s just so stupid. They spend
$2000 to get their boobs enlarged or shrunken or whatever. That’s what
the song’s about. I’ll tell you a story about sexism. There were these
people in Frankfurt, Germany on our first tour of Europe…a big feminist
group that got on our backs about our song “On the Rag” which I wrote
about my old girlfriend. They yelled at us, and we argued, then finally
we agreed that we wouldn’t play that song that night. We felt that was
fair. So we’re up there, not playing that song, and these girls start
throwing full bottles of beer at us. What a waste. (laughter) They started
shouting at us, they unplugged the PA, then some big guy came after me
and we got in a big fight. They were dumb, they were at all. Bigger bands,
like the Accused or DOA, that have songs that are much worse, get to play,
no problem. These punkers that are so hypocritically politically correct,
love to pick on the little guys.

MRR:What about your song about some woman who was
following the band around like the Grateful Dead.

Fat
Mike:Some girl named Jenny from Lincoln, Nebraska
started driving around and following us to every town. She was with our
drummer Erik. He didn’t want to be with her. She had a Jimi Hendrix tattoo
which was really stupid. Not the guy’s face, just the words, “Jimi Hendrix,”
So she was a real pain in the ass. She was crying every night, creating
a big scene, because we kept leaving. What did she expect, we were on
tour for god sake!…Hey, Jenny! (laughter)

MRR:So what about this summer, will you be touring
again?

Fat
Mike:We’re going back to Europe in April. They’ll
be a US tour in August. Europe should be a lot of fun. We’re going to
England for the first time.

MRR:They have a lot of beer there, you guys should
probably do pretty well there.

Fat
Mike:Yeah, but I don’t drink that much on tour.

MRR:Come to think of it, you came back quite slim
from Europe last time. They must not have been feeding you well enough.

Fat
Mike:Oh, they feed you great in Europe. Lots of
pasta, lot’s of vegetarian food.

MRR:That must have been hard on you.

Fat
Mike:No, actually at most of the clubs we played
at, everybody was a vegetarian. So they would have a big thing of spaghetti
and a huge bowl of vegetarian sauce and then right next to it a smaller
one of meat sauce. That gave that to us, which was nice of them.

MRR:So what’s next in terms of projects, are you
going to do anything on your own?

Fat
Mike:As a matter of fact, I’m starting a record
label called Fat Records. I’ll probably put a NOFX record or 12”…a couple
of 7”s. I’m gonna put out a band called Slang who have 3 members of RKL.
So that’s my next project.

MRR:You just graduated from college.

Fat
Mike:Yeah, I’m a college graduate from San Francisco
State University. Just graduated today. Now I’m a professional punk rocker.

MRR:So will NOFX be leaving Epitaph to be on Fat
Records?

Fat
Mike:We’re not really leaving Epitaph. I’m putting
out a seven or eight song 12” for NOFX. We’ll see how it goes, we may
do another record on Epitaph. It’s a good label.

MRR:I know you want to be a professional musician,
but in the punk scene there's such a stigma attached to selling out, would
you like to continue putting out your own records?

Fat
Mike:Yeah, we’re not gonna go to a major label,
it’s either Fat or Epitaph. Sure I’d like to make a living off this but
we’re just playing shows. Like Fugazi, they make fucking tens of thousands
of dollars. But it’s because a lot of people come to see them. They don’t
have high door prices. They’re not selling out, but they’re making, or
could be making a living off of it. Then Bad Brains, they go to Europe
and charge $25 a show. There’s a difference between bands like Fugazi
and Bad Brains.

MRR:What’s the song “Moron Brothers” about?

Fat
Mike:It’s about our drummer Erik and our roadie
DJ. They really do stuff like that. At parties they piss in people’s ice
trays and put them back in the refrigerator. Crazy things like that. Feed
your dogs Ex-Lax so they shit all around the house. They even tattooed
on their toes “Tits & Booze.”\So
anyone reading this, don’t ever let those two tattoo you. They’ll tell
you they know how to do tattoos and they’ll do one on you but they’re
not very good. They bring a tattoo gun on tour with them and give tattoos
to people. Erik showed some guy this good tattoo he has and said DJ did
it. So they guy’s all. “Cool, can you do this on my back?” DJ’s all, “Sure,
no problem,” so DJ put an“SK,” on his back. It looked exactly like a
“5K.” His initials are “SK,” but it looks like 5 kilometers.

MRR:Do they get paid for this?

Fat
Mike:No, but Erik did a Misfits skull on one guy
and it looked really, really bad. They were drunk with a tattoo gun. So
they’re the moron brothers.

MRR:Is one of you’re new songs you sing about something
like, “There’s no lesson to be learned if there’s nobody here to learn
it.” Are NOFX actually getting sensitive or peace punky?

Fat
Mike:Oh, no. Not at all. It was either Stephen King
or Harlan Ellison who wrote a story about everybody dying of the flu.
So it’s like all that nuclear power, peace punk stuff is bogus, it’s just
a virus that killed everybody.

MRR:Let’s talk about something controversial. How
about the Persian Gulf?

Fat
Mike:I won’t go. I already have a plan if they start
a draft.

MRR:What’s that?

Fat
Mike:Move into my mother’s house… and not leave.
(laughter)

MRR:I recently heard criticisms along the lines
of, “ The singer NOFX is an asshole.” How do you respond to that? (laughter)

Fat
Mike:I don’t know. I’ve met some politically correct
people in San Francisco and they kind of think I’m an asshole, but that’s
because they’re dumb and don’t know me. All of those people that are trying
to be politically correct disagree with my lyrics, but I don’t think they’ve
thought about what they believe in very much. Mykel Board is the coolest
guy in the world. Most of the things he says are logical and make a lot
of sense. He doesn’t side with anybody. He sides with what makes sense.
That’s what I try to do. A lot of people try to take sides on issues that
are stupid.

MRR:So what do you think of the scene in general,
do you think there’s more of a political allegiance among a bunch of bands?

Fat
Mike:It’s the same old thing. There’s all the
vegetarians in San Francisco and all the politically correct people that
like to limit themselves too much. Certain clothes, certain foods; you’ve
got to try everything.

MRR:I heard that the band had a strong pro-homosexuality
stance on their last US tour…

Fat
Mike:I’m not pro homosexuality, I’m pro sexuality.
People should do whatever feels good to them. What people don’t need to
do is label themselves a certain sexuality and limit themselves to one
sexual orientation. There was this one place on tour where we met all
these stupid skinheads. Not that skinheads are stupid; but these particularly
stupid skinheads would go to this gay bar and look at all the fags and
then pick someone out and beat them up or something. So we got into this
big fight with them because they had gone to this bar and come back, and
said, “Oh, look at those guys kissing, gross.” But from what we understood
they used to go there all the time. We kind of got the idea they kind
of enjoyed looking at these guys. Because they would go there a couple
times a week. It definitely appeared that they were attracted to the place.

MRR:So what’s your overall view of NOFX in the
big picture?

Fat
Mike:We’re progressing but we’re not changing our
style.

MRR:Where do you see the band five years from now,
do you see punk as changing?

Fat
Mike:I don’t think punk changes very much. I think
it’s getting bigger than it ever has. Bands like Bad Religion and Fugazi
are selling tons and tons of albums. I don’t think it’s changed much,
I just think that bands are getting better. I think this band, Snuff,
I saw are great…Green Day are pretty great. Back in LA in the early 80’s
bands were great, like Agent Orange, Social Distortion and Bad Religion.
I guess there were 5 or 6 years where the bands just got bad. They started
getting faster but not good. Maybe from ‘84-’88 bands were getting worse.

MRR:We talked a little bit about your feelings
on politically righteous bands and individuals, but where do you stand
yourself as far as political position?

Fat
Mike:I try to be very irreverent. I take a political
stance but I’m more of a reactionist. I believe in morals but most of
society’s mores are totalbullshit,
like all the sexual mores.

MRR:You mean in terms of conservatism?

Fat
Mike:Yeah, like picking out certain sexual acts
to be illegal, like that guy in Atlanta who got 18 months for having oral
sex with his girlfriend. California is pretty conservative, but SF is
really cool. So my political stance is that I don’t have a political stance.
I just take charge of what I believe in. I’m consistent in that way. But
I don’t have to be consistently on the liberal side. A person can consider
themselves left wing and they’ll always stay on the left wing whether
it’s right or wrong. It’s like the pay to play thing. Should some club
let some stupid band play their place where 5 people will show up and
they’ll lose $300? No. A band has to get a following, and you have to
pay to do it or play parties. We used to play parties when we were a smaller
band. It wasn’t any problem. It’s free. Pay to play makes total sense.
Open up a club that doesn’t do that and you’ll go out of business, unless
you can get a big headliner every night.

MRR:So the more objectionable thing is more the
club’s, a place like the Stone for Instance, general attitude?

Fat
Mike:At the Gilman St. shows they try to make sure
there's a fair amount of good bands to draw people. They can’t book four
bad bands in a night cuz no one will go.

MRR:NOFX did a song on pornography called “Vanilla
Sex,” could you comment on it?

Fat
Mike:Well,to
get out of college my big thesis paper was on pornography. It was a 30
page paper. The problem people have with pornography is that it can be
violent and often degrades women. But violence and degradation against
women is much more prevalent in the mass media. Millions of people are
exposed to the mass media. Movies like Gone With the Wind depict rape
in a totally positive light. Values are instilled within us at a very
young age when you’re watching TV. By the time you’re 18-21 and read pornography
you already have your values instilled in you. If you’re gonna attack
something, attack the violence and degradation against women, not just
because it’s X-Rated.

MRR:What do you think of censorship, particularly
in reference to 2 Live Crew?

Fat
Mike:I hate that band, I think they’re really terrible,
but that’s beside the point. I think they should be allowed to play but
I think they should pay clubs that are 18 years or older. I think that’s
totally fair. They should only be able to sell records to people that
are 18 years or older. They are just as pornographic as any dirty magazine,
so only adults should be allowed to see them.

MRR:Isn’t that a double standard in terms of them
being called sexist as opposed to all the other sexist stuff that goes
on?

Fat
Mike:There should be a sticker on their record saying
you have to be over 18. If they rate X-rated movies why not rate records.
If it’s an X-rated song, you should be over 18 to get it. I don’t necessarily
believe that one has to be 18 to look at pornography, but I don’t see
any reason why movies and magazines can be rated while music while music
can not.

MRR:Do you anything wrong with the fact that nobody
objects to sexism in music until the point where it becomes explicit?

Fat
Mike:Yes.

MRR:So you’re saying that since you think 2 Live
Crew are such an explicit example that there should be some form of control
instituted?

Fat
Mike:Absolutely. They should be able to play whatever
they want to but artists and musicians seem to have this feeling that
they’re better than everyone else and that this feeling that they’re better
than everyone else and that censorship shouldn’t apply to them, but it
should. A song can be X-rated just like a movie can. “Artists” have to
be just as responsible as other people. They are a part of this society
and they should have to live by the same rules that we all have to live
by. So they shouldn’t bitch about being labelled. If a kid can’t see an
X-rated movie they shouldn’t be able to hear an X-rated song. I don’t
see any problem with that. Magazines are rated, movies are rated, books
are rated, why the hell can’t records be rated? Art even? I wouldn’t want
a six year old to go see the Robert Mapplethorpe exhibit, that showed
a photograph of some guy’s dick nailed down to a board, and some fist
fucking scene. I saw it, but I’m over 18.