Tuesday, 27 September 2016

The Journey of Forgiveness

By Peter
James Field

This article was kindly authorized to be uploaded to
my blog by Peter Field, Fellow of the
Royal Society of Health, a British psychotherapist andhypnotherapist in Birmingham and London (UK).www.peterfieldhypnotherapy.co.uk

Are you currently dealing with a damaging circumstance
that's using way too much emotional energy? Possibly you've been hurt in a love
relationship or maybe cheated financially. Maybe the damaging attitude or
behavior of a friend, member of your family, colleague or neighbor continues to
antagonize you as well.

Reaching farther back, do issues from childhood still
worry and also cause you harm?

There is a approach to lighten up your load, reclaim
your life and have things back on track. That way is forgiveness. Working
through a procedure that leads to forgiveness is a potent antidote to emotional
pain. Releasing damaging emotions as well as arriving at that place where
forgiveness is possible is often the ultimate way to move forward with your
life.

For those who have been hurt by someone else, you
might pause to ask, 'Could forgiving
someone end up being self-defeating -- even harmful? What if I forgive and then
find this person returning to hurt me once again?'

Understand that it is possible to implement measures
for self-protection and still work towards forgiveness. You can decide to look
for suitable safeguard in the event that someone is stalking you, for instance.
Or, you can move away from the person who is interfering with your life.
Forgiveness does not mean foolishness.
It might have been a costly lesson, but the learning is yours now.

Through learning how to forgive, we take back whatever
strength we might previously have lost. If it's suitable to tell the other
person that we choose to forgive them, this could diffuse tension too. Once
verbalize our forgiveness, it can relieve tension, bringing with it a calmness
that had previously been denied. Alternatively, we may choose to forgive and
not tell the person who has offended us, and this is fine, too.

Perhaps we could see forgiveness as a boundary,
something which restricts negative energy from actively poisoning our personal
space. When we forgive, we're proactively saying, 'I release my self as well as
my emotions from your grip. I'll not hate you. I will not let that negative
energy to affect my life.'

First and
foremost, remember that forgiveness is for you - not for the person you need to
forgive - something that frees you from the
crippling emotional weight of the past and its damages. In forgiving you
undoubtedly can find the internal harmony that you deserve.

The process of forgiving, of shifting from anxiety and
harm to a much more tranquil, balanced internal state, requires us to consider
what exactly took place. The person or people who have harmed us had reason for
what they did, regardless of whether they or we recognize those reasons. Most
likely they too, in their very own way, happen to be the victim of others, hurt
or damaged by their very own particular past. While there may be missing parts
and pieces in the puzzle, it is we, and not they, who decide the way we choose
to respond to what has took place.

Through this process we may reach a more profound
understanding: though we've been treated unfairly or even unkindly, it is now
in the past. And it is there that it needs to remain if we are to move forward
with our life in a more balanced, and much freer manner.

Arriving at the place where forgiveness is possible
cannot be accomplished overnight. It can take time to process the pain.
Therapy, support groups, or self-help tools can all be profoundly valuable.
It's perfectly acceptable to fully realize the true impact of what the person
or people did. Anything less is not honoring ourself. It's healthy to get all
of it out in the open.

Taking the high road is always the mature, benevolent
and wise thing to do. Yet, proactively deciding to forgive is not the same as
ignoring the truth. To forgive does not necessarily mean that we forget. The
goal of forgiveness is to release yourself from the anger, the harm and the
hate, not to deny what happened.

If you are hurting and filled with anger, perhaps
forgiveness really is the key that can unlock those shackles that are keeping
you in pain. Finding your own way to forgive may not be straight forward, but
it is one of the most liberating things you can possibly do. Maybe now is the
moment to move on from the past and forgive. Your life awaits you and there is
no real need to delay. Begin your journey of forgiveness right now and move
ahead a wiser, more balanced person.

Friday, 9 September 2016

“A pet
is a medication without side effects that has so many benefits. I can't always
explain it myself, but for years now I've seen how instances of having a pet is
like an effective drug. It really does help people.” Dr.
Edward Creagan, Oncologist at Mayo Clinic, Rochester, MN.16

Foreword

In 1669, John
Locke argued that the relationship with animals, had a socializing function. The use of pets as conventional
assistants in mental illness therapies dates back to 1792 inEngland. Later,
in 1867 inBethel (Biefeld,
Germany).
animals were involved as well in the treatment of epilepsy In 1944, the
American Red Cross organized, a the first therapeutic rehabilitation program
for airmen at the Air Force Convalescent Center in New York,

Animal-assisted therapy (AAT)

Zootherapy or
animal-assisted therapy (AAT) is an activity where the mission is to select,
train and certify animals for supportive treatments and therapies for patients
of all ages affected by debilitating
diseases which compromise the social,
emotional and cognitive level.

Our limbic system is responsible for regulating the emotional component of our
behavior. Contact with nature generates the release of substances called endorphins,
which stimulate feelings of tranquility that distend and gratify our thought
processes.

These results are apparently larger and more noticeable in children, because in
them affective thoughts predominates over rationalization. 8. The species most used are dogs, cats,
horses, birds, rabbits and dolphins.

In 1996 the Faculty of Veterinary Science
at the University of Buenos Aires (UBA)
signed an agreement with a Therapeutic Community of Temperley (Province of Buenos Aires) , whereby mentally
disabled patients (young and adult males) would concur to interact with animals. This is the first
precedent in this institution regarding animal assisted therapy.

The Animal Assisted TherapyCenter was created on April 8, 2003, by
Resolution. CD 712/03) . 18

The Animal Assisted Therapy Centerhas
signed agreements since 2005, one with the Tornú
Hospital, where works and research
in the palliative care unit are being carried; and another in 2007 with the Faculty of Medicine UBA, which appointed
the IREP (Institute of Psychophysical
Rehabilitation) to work and investigate assisted therapy with horses (Echinotherapy in adult patients with
chronic strokes sequels.

In our country, the riding school Hippocampusestablished an Echinotherapy center at
the Club Hípico La Horqueta. In this
last trained horses help in the rehabilitation and treatment of diseases,
especially motor ones. 2

In Argentina there
is a free access AAT Unit with trained dogs in the pediatric Hospital Pedro de Elizalde. These techniques are very useful for autistic
patients and children with mental retardation.

The
dogs in AAT

Canine involvement in the military dates
back to some of the earliest forms of organized combat. In ancient armies and
battles dogs were trained and employed as canine soldiers and companions
(Forster, 1941). In modern military combat this involvement continues with dogs
as scouts, in communications and logistics, in battle, as a means of
integration and intimidation, and in detecting weapons. During the Second World
War canines were used for the first time in therapy, providing emotional
support for those injured in battle. A celebrated war dog, Smoky a four-pound Yorkshire terrier is credited as the first military therapy dog
for his work assisting nurses with the provision of care in 1944 inNew Guinea .4

Empathy: The relationship with the animal favors the fact of standing in someone else's shoes

Relationships: An
emotional safe communication channel is established between therapist and patient.

Acceptance: Animals have a particular way of accepting people without judging them. They do not care how
patients look or what they
may say.

Entertainment: Animals provide fun and are ideal for geriatrics.

Socialization: Animals provide more socialization making people more sociable with others, reduce anxiety and
stress and improve mood.

Mental Stimulus: Through increasing communication with others thus helping the evocation of memories.

Physiological benefits: Many people feel relaxed when animals are present and have a decrease in their blood
pressure. There may also be a strengthening of the muscles and
improved recovery of heart disease.

Service Dogs3,12,17,19

The service dog is specially trained to help undertake tasks for which the
patient is incapacitated. This is the case of dogs that help the blind (guide
dog) or help epileptics. These dogs can turn on the lights and open doors,
carry emergency medication and help ambulation. They also assist the veteran
into performing certain exercises.

The Emotional Support Dog

The Emotional Support Dog (or PSA
Psychiatric Service Dog) helps patients with mental conditions. These dogs do
not need special training. Such dogs are able to identify the different
patterns of behavior of each patient and incredibly fit each.

Proven benefits of emotional support dogs:

Reduce medical and psychiatric costs.

Reduce suicidal tendencies.

Reduce the risk of violence, alcoholism, abuse drugs and depression.

Reduce the incidence of severe mental crisis.

Emotional support dogs´ mechanism of action and war veterans.7

Dogs use the action of their body weight to
reduce anxiety and panic. This is called Deep Pressure Stimulation.

Through licking or nudging they interrupt
flashbacks or nightmares.

They watch the veteran´sback cover when queuing or when being in a public environment thereby
reducing their hypervigilance.

Dogs cause increased levels of oxytocin which improves confidence and the ability to
interpret facial expressions overcoming paranoia and other harmful
effects of PTSD. 11

Researchers at the University
of Melbourne (Australia) found that the link between man
and dog is so strong than their heartbeats come to be
synchronized. 10

Note:

Oxytocin apart from being a hormone
produced in the hypothalamus and secreted in the pituitary gland is a neurotransmitter linked to trust,
altruism, generosity, training links, empathy and regulation of fear
eliminating responses paralysis- It is also involved in learning and memory,
face recognition and recognition of emotions in others. Oxitocin activates
reward centers producing pleasure (occurs during orgasm).It´s related to
monogamy and fidelity, allows the cohesion between groups of people and is
closely linked with interpersonal intelligence. For all this is known as the love hormone or linkages´ hormone.

The Emotional Support Dog and PTSD3,4

One of the current
strategies for treating veterans with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is
the use of dogs for their emotional support. (Klontz, Bivens, Leinart, & Klontz, 2007; Sockalingam et al.,
2008). This approach has massive support from organizations and the public
in general. 13

Veterans
who use a PSD (Psychiatric Service Dogs)
to manage their PTSD reported that their psychological symptoms decreased as
result of the assistance and support from the service animal (Esnyra & Love, 2008).

Dogs help the veteran to not isolate themselves increasing their social
participation (Camp, 2001;. Rintala et
al, 2002.The
introduction of a dog or PSD improved social relations within family structures
(Yount, et al., 2012; Beck et al., 2012).

A third social benefit
of PSD was its perception as a non-stigmatizing therapeutic intervention (Taylor et al., 2013).

Allen and Blascovich (1966)
demonstrated in a randomized study that emotional support dogs offer an
excellent cost / benefit level.

The case of an American veteran of Iraq and
Afghanistan1,15

Robert Soliz was one of the 300,000 US veterans of Iraq
and Afghanistan
diagnosed with PTSD. According to a study by the RAND Corporation 50 per cent
of those affected veterans with mental illnessnever received the treatment they needed. (Tanielian & Jaycox, 2008).13

Soliz (31) was an Army specialist. He was discharged in 2005 but his life was
destroyed by fear, anxiety, depression and drug abuse. He said: “I would constantly be
scanning for who was going to come stab me from behind,” .He could not show
affection or hug their children.

His life took a new twist when he entered the program Paws for Purple Hearts is one of four pilot programs in 2008 caused
nationwide using dogs Labradors and Golden Retrievers for war veterans affected
with PTSD.

Golden Retriever

“There is no psychiatrist in the
world

like a puppy licking your face.”

(Ben Williams)

Travel and accommodation of emotional
support dogs

These dogs are allowed to fly free in
the aircraft cabin with their owners without crates and without weight
restrictions. The owner must submit a letter from a mental health professional
who so testifies. 3

Lufthansa supports the ability to bring dogs aboard therapeutic and psychiatric
assistance, free on flights to / from the US operated by Lufthansa. There are
restrictions on connecting flights outside the US.

On connecting
flights outside the US
operated by Lufthansa, pet dogs for therapeutic or psychiatric purposes are
only supported paying the surcharge.

Depending on your weight or size also they must travel inside a container
inside the cabin ('pet in cabin') or in the cargo hold. 9

https://es.pinterest.com/pin/231794712051242775/

The Fair
Housing Amendments Act of 1988, Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973,
and Title II of the Americans with Disabilities Act protect the right of people
with disabilities to keep emotional support animals, even when a landlord's
policy explicitly prohibits pets. Because emotional support and service animals
are not "pets," but rather are considered to be more like assistive
aids such as wheelchairs, the law will generally require the landlord to make
an exception to its "no pet" policy so that a tenant with a
disability can fully use and enjoy his or her dwelling. 6

Veterinary
care3

VA does provide veterinary care for service
dogs that are deemed medically necessary for the rehabilitation or restorative
care plan of Veterans with permanent physical impairments

Pets for Vets5

In USAPets for Vets help to heal the
emotional wounds of military veterans by pairing them with a shelter dog that
is specially selected to match his or her personality. Professional animal
trainers rehabilitate the dogs and teach them good manners to fit into the
veteran’s lifestyle. Training may also include desensitization to wheel chairs
or crutches as well as recognizing panic or anxiety disorder behaviors.

The first thing we need to do when it comes to living more courageously is to understand what courage is and what it is not.

There are a lot of misconceptions around the word, and many of us go through life never really understanding what it means to have courage or to be courageous.

From our earliest years we have known of people who are courageous. They might be real people we know, or simply know about, people who have won through despite the challenges or the odds. Or they might be fictional characters we've seen on television or read about in books. Usually they are people who don't seem to feel the fear that we feel. But if we reflect for a moment, we may just realize that fear itself isn't the actual problem. It just might be our relationship with fear that keeps us from being courageous.

Courageous Preconceptions

Most of us like and admire courageous people. We want to be like them -- or at least feel like them. We want to never have to suffer fear, self-doubt, or anxiety again. The problem is that most of us will never experience this perfect 'fearless' self. That sort of courage might exist in story books and movies, but it is not real.

Psychologists now largely agree that courage is not the absence of fear; it is the determination to take action even in the presence of fear. It is pushing on, despite the fear, because you have a goal that you believe is worth the effort and discomfort. So many people feel bad about themselves for being afraid or anxious. They believe 'courageous' people simply don't experience these emotions. But they do.

The real difference is that courageous people just don't allow their feelings of fear prevent them from doing what they really want to do. Courageous people do uncomfortable, knee-shaking things all the time, and they, too, feel fear. It's just that they consider their fear and discomfort to be a necessary part of living a full life, and so they push on, in spite of it.

It is natural to feel nervous on a first date, or at a first kiss. Driving for the first time can be both intimidating and exciting. The first day at school or in a new job can be absolutely terrifying! Yet fear is part of what makes these experiences meaningful. As Mark Twain once said, 'Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear -- not absence of fear'.

Normalizing Discomfort

One of the most important things to understand about fear, is that it is never going to completely go away. It's part of every single human being's emotional vocabulary, our repertoire of feelings. Doing something new, something daring, something important, is always going to challenge you, often bringing with it those feelings we know as 'fear'.

According to Bren&eacute; Brown, qualitative researcher and TEDx speaker, when we try to repress one emotion -- such as fear or shame -- we effectively numb all other emotions, even positive ones like joy, excitement, and even love.

Simply avoiding fear triggers -- snakes, job changes, public speaking, or a difficult mother-in-law, for example -- is no solution. Run, and you'll be forever running. Instead, Brown encourages people to face their feelings of vulnerability, and see them as a crucial part of being human -- courageous and daring -- even if it means opening up to judgement, hurt or disappointment.

Being daring is all about leaving your comfort zone and jumping into the arena of life. Choosing to live how you want and being yourself can be uncomfortable at times. Understanding and accepting your feelings of discomfort are the first steps to being truly courageous.

Prepare Yourself

What gives a person courage can be deceptively simple at times. When you are feeling challenged in reaching a goal, realizing a dream, or making a decision (be it asking someone out on a date or climbing Mount Everest), sitting down and scribbling a list of what you need in order to move forward can be really helpful.

If you want to be a writer, and you haven't written anything since high school, then of course writing a novel is bound to feel overwhelming, even terrifying. What about joining a writer's group, or taking a single weekend workshop in writing where you'll meet others struggling with similar difficulties? The trick lies in beginning -- and then keeping on. Take things one chunk, one step at a time. Begin with those first few steps and let yourself be surprised by your own ability. If you're feeling nervous about asking someone out on a date, ask yourself what would help you feel more confident -- a new haircut, your best pair of shoes, a session at the gym? Off the top of your head, what are the two or three things that would make the biggest difference to you feeling braver?

Maybe you need more support, a new location, some more training, or just a new attitude. Perhaps it's something concrete and basic, like equipment, software, clothes, licensing, or money. What are the first things you need to prepare in order to bring just a bit more courage into your life and help you realize your dreams? Don't let this be an excuse for inaction, telling yourself you just can't do it because you don't have this or that yet. Decide what you need -- and then go for it!

Telling Stories

Our lives can be either enhanced or restricted by the stories we tell ourselves. A single, isolated event that produced feelings of intimidation or fear can alter a person's story, casting him or her into the role of victim, a role in which they live their life believing they are small, afraid and weak. A whole sense of identity can be based on such negative experiences. But it really doesn't need to be this way. It is within our power to change our stories, and we can do this whenever we choose. Here expert hypnotherapy can help clear past programing so that you can move forward, writing your own story.

You are the author of your life. Make a decision about how you want to progress with your life: who do you want to become from now on. When things are getting tough, take another look at your situation, your script. See it from another perspective.

Remember to acknowledge your accomplishments, your talents and your gifts. Write a list of the times when you have pushed through in spite of fear or anxiety, times when you acted courageously or in a more confident manner than usual. Is there a pattern? What can you learn from these experiences that you can apply going forward?

In your present circumstance, see yourself now as a person who is doing something (or contemplating doing something) that scares not only you, but possibly other people, as well. Maybe you'll want to overcome your fear of public speaking by joining a group of like-minded people in Toastmasters International, or be really brave and challenge your fear of heights by skydiving or bungy jumping. Hypnotherapy can be really useful here, too, helping you to condition your mind to let go of past experience, face your fears, and live much more in the now. Mindfulness can help, too. How about something a little less challenging to begin with? Learning to cook or ride a unicycle? You get the idea.

No matter the roadblocks, the setbacks, or the anxiety, praise yourself. You are ahead of the rest of the crowd who are not yet willing to try. Consider the worst case scenario, the one where you crash and burn and fail in every possible way. How bad is that, really? What is the positive that might come from that experience? Going there in your mind can de-sensitize the subconscious fear response, lessening the anxiety.

This really can take the venom out of the deepest fear; it demonstrates that even if the worst came to the worst, life still goes on; we will survive. Ask yourself to think of three or four positive things that you might get from such a worse case scenario that will help you going forward. Mental rehearsal in which you succeed can be a powerful way of conditioning the mind to do just that.

Living courageously takes effort. It takes practice. But each time you do it you increase your inner steel, you win through and grow stronger. Go ahead now -- strike out! You just might surprise yourself.