Monday Morning “Impediment to Productivity” – 20060724

Hi,

And here we are again, bright eyed bushy tailed (unlike last week).

There are a few of you out there who and a tad bandwidth challenged, so here is a bit specially for you. These disturbingly funny conversations allegedly took place between air traffic controllers and pilots around the world. They are very funny but sadly the authenticity of these alleged conversations cannot be guaranteed.
Here is the first couple

Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!” Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!”

“TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.” “Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?” “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”

From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored!” Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!” Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f…ing bored, not f…ing stupid!”
The rest can be found at http://www.businessballs.com/airtrafficcontrollersfunnyquotes.htm
(This reminded me of the “Canada Coastguard story,
It is said that one stormy night, the captain of a warship peered through the gloom–and he spotted a light, barely visible in the fog. With a loudspeaker on the ship, the captain bellowed, “Unknown vessel, change your course to starboard!”

A voice across the water replied, “You must tack to starboard!”

Angrily the captain shouted back, “This is the ship’s captain you are speaking to. You are in our path. Tack to starboard immediately!”

Again, a voice in the mist: “This is seaman first class Jones. Change course to starboard immediately!”

The captain bellowed his ultimatum: “This is a warship of the U.S. Navy. Tack to starboard or be destroyed!”

The voice replied, “Sir, this is a lighthouse!” ) Sorry, it always amuses me.

Now onto “Blame”ÃƒÂ This from Mark.
“A fun game for all to play…
http://addictingclips.com/Content.aspx?key=BC59B4307C52214A&refCode=&brand=ag
Enjoy your day
MARK”
Not work safeÃƒÂ not really safe at all when I think about it.
And on a similar hysterical theme.
Movies are made to be seen.
http://tinyurl.com/lnryd.
(Blame JoolsÃƒÂ she found this one)

The Game (I hear you cry) The GameÃƒÂ . So what happens when you take Asteroids, add a bunch of other players, and kind of lose the the asteroids? You get Multiplayer Asteroids. It’s a fast-paced Flash space shooter sort of based on asteroid and then bungs in a dozen or so players. The controls? Nothing’s changed Left and right rotate your ship, up and down move you forward and backward, and the space bar fires. With three or four players there’s a little more strategy involved than when there’s 10 players, in which case the screen is a blizzard of projectiles. (Where’s Bruce Willis when you need him).
http://cogames.net/asteroids/