Now to convince myself to turn here everyday. It is hard to go through life changes alone, espeically when someof us have not chosen "aloneness" so much as chosing "un-abusedness". If you've never been in that situation you won't understand what... Read more

nine months ago I lost my daughter and I've kind of lost em too, along the way. Both the youngest and i are still mourning, jsut not ever second of every day now. So muc we could have said, or done. Oddly, I know that if she were here right now,... Read more

Well, i made this a post and realized its more of a blog. I lost my 27 year old daughter this past month, and haven't been "right" since. sorry, but that is how i feel. i don't even know that i'm back yet....but this last six months has been awf... Read more

So I decide to take the dog for a walk, because all I've been able to think about since midnight is Ben and Jerry's and thank goodness the kid is spending the night at friends', or she and I would be on our way to the grocery.... But...I digress... Read more

So why do i sit here
eating these crackers
when I know the calories
make me go quakers
I know that the wheat
makes me feel fatter
makes tummy puffy
and never grow flatter.
I eat and I snack,
I chomp and I chew
and all the goo... Read more

Finally decided to invest. Works like a dream if you follow the directions. I will give it some time to see if the liquified fruits and veggies works for me -- i love veggies but hate fruits and this is an effort to balance my diet a little.
... Read more

So even though I ate junk, I stayed below my calorie and carb limit. Trying hard to think of stuff like frozen greek yogurt as alternatives to hardcore junk foods. So far, so good. I could have eaten the whole container, instead of soemthere bet... Read more

2013 has been very stressful. I don't think i know anyone that hasn't had a death either in their family or close circule of friends in 2013. Tomorrow is the service for my dear friend and religous advisor, my "cousin from a different oven". He ... Read more

I spent this week detoxing from coffee. I felt like I was coming off heroin (and I have a child that was addicted to heroin, so we know what it is like). Did real well. I think I finally shook it.
THEN I GOT SICK. Like S*I*C*K. You guessed... Read more

Finally forced myself to get back on the scale and yesssss indeed I am back at 280. I'm actually surprised it is not more, but still. The combination of the holidays and a very traumatic death in the family just about did me in.
Methinks i... Read more

In my work, I had a client request that I do a study on "diabesity" for them. I'd never heard of it. Much to my surprise, many parts of the world are calling the combination of diabetes and obesity "diabesity". It's not a very complementary dise... Read more

Not at my house, it doesn't.
Scary. Today I made a great casserole (very tasty) that served 4. Carefully I split it up and put half in the fridge for lunch tomorrow. Angel and I had our serving.
We worried about food all evening.
... Read more

Clearly there's an on-and-off pattern in my behavior! It seems that Spark People is the first thing to go when I'm under stress, even though I'm literally desk-tied. You'd think that with being forced to be on the computer all day, Spark People ... Read more

Wednesday, September 12, 2012 - Fitting pledge for today!
"Today, I promise I will not quit.
I pledge that no matter, how many ups and downs I pass through, I will continue on my journey.
I pledge to make a NEW START today, and... Read more

Quite late in the season (it took a while to warm up this year) I spotted two mystery plants growing where no one had planted anything. They are huge, now expanding roughly 15 feet into my driveway. These pix were taken about 2 weeks ago. The bl... Read more