Currently- 8/23/19 (Clinic, Laziness, Obligations)

Yesterday my mom informed me that she needed to do something at our actual house which is around a hundred miles away. For context we have a home but its exceedingly far away from where we work so we’re staying in an unusual situation and we just use the house for a glorified storage space for all of the stuff we want but don’t need and can’t fit in our new small space. Anyways so my dad had some doctor’s appointments for the next day so I would have to fill in. Extra annoyance on top of that was I was forced to spend the night with my dad because he’s prone to accidents so I basically just needed to be there in case he needed me. Not wanting to sleep in the same bed as my dad, for a multitude of reasons, I opted to use a very uncomfortable cot in a very uncomfortable position. It took a while but I finally went to sleep and it… wasn’t as bad as I was expecting it to be.

Further adding on to the “Was not as bad as I expected” mood the whole situation with my dad wasn’t the worst. Although we did spend around two hours waiting for a procedure that ended up taking less than ten minutes and then me pushing my dad a pretty decent distance away for another check up, the whole situation was a lot less terrible than I initially was expecting. Not only that but I got some food out of it, a mostly full tank of gas and a hundred bucks for my emergency fund that I had previously drained. So… neat. I guess its sort of my new response to annoying things that has made stuff like this less annoying. I don’t yell and scream about doing something I hate, rather I just sigh and do it. Admittedly that is a bit passive aggressive but… hey, I did it to the best of my ability so you can’t knock me for that.

Something that I’m less proud of is I essentially told myself I wasn’t going to get any work done on my book. I was already expecting the situation to go on for a long time, which it did, and that I wouldn’t have any energy to do any work. Pretty much I just convinced myself I wouldn’t get anything done as an excuse to do nothing. This is something I can be disappointed in myself about. Effort is effort and I can’t blame myself for not meeting expectations. I can, however, blame myself for being kind of dumb. I hope to learn from this.

My current part time job is going pretty decent. The pay is nice, the job is easy and I can fit it into my life sort of well. The one problem I have is it kind of cuts my potential time to hang out with my friend to even lower levels. She’s usually tired after work and I work on weekends so there’s a pretty significant dead zone of any free time in our schedules. I was thinking about potentially getting her on a Friday but texting her today had her say she was playing a game with some friends and would text back later. She never did but I’m not going to hold that against her. Also right now I’m supposed to work right now for a weird time so its put my plan into question. Its been a while since I’ve seen her and that kind of sucks because I feel genuinely happy around her. Oh well, some other time then.