Tuesday, January 6, 2009

There she goes again with the baking fantasies

Not like anyone writes checks anymore, ha ha, but I did actually get the date right on the one I wrote this week. I think this means I am OLD but not yet beginning the decline. Happy 2009!

Since I was here last I had a nice vacation to the mountains, snow! Blizzard! Sledding! and then my dad had emergency surgery on Christmas Day, and me being the worst daughter on earth talked to them early in the morning Merry Christmas love you bye and then pranced back into my no-cell-phone-bars vacation hideaway and didn't get the call that my family had all spent the night in the ER and hospital transfer in an ambulance and everything being good and loyal family members without any word from me,The One Who Knows About Medical Things. (He should make a full recovery.)

And then there was more snow and more flights and oh! We met this family in SeaTac airport who had been there snowed in for four days with two boys, you know back when Seattle shut down because we don't know what snow is and have no trucks. So they went out to the parking lot and built snowmen and played video games in the USO lounge until the Red Cross brought them toys and one of them grabbed a big fancy toy garbage truck and then Hugo found him because of the garbage truck radar he has and they all played happily and got on our plane with us.

But then I got all woo-woo, which is really not so hard for me to do but sometimes I can get caught up in peanut butter sandwiches and diapers and such and so get a break from all that crap but up there in the mountains it hit me kind of hard so I was all look, an eagle, it's a sign, and look, I'm snooping in my in-laws' bookshelf and here's a book I think it's a SIGN meant JUST FOR ME. And then I made Jeff all you know DEAL with my woo-woo and made him read the silly marriage book and then he went and built a robot with his uncle and his uncle gave me more hugs than he's ever given me in his life so I think they all think I am GOING THROUGH SOMETHING probably because of my father and my new job but they all also think I'm a good mother so I'll take it. And then Hugo got his very own enormous green garbage truck from great-grandma with a mechanical dumping thingy and a GUY who doesn't really fit in the cab and it was all very exciting except we had to ship it back instead of carry it. It was THAT big.

And then we got back and I started my FULL TIME JOB this week, what is up with that? How do you people do it, this working thing? I used to, back when I just had myself to worry about a million years ago. I LIKED it, I THRIVED. But heavens! I am no longer cut out for this. I know I wrote a dissertation and all but that was playtime. And this is a pansy job, in the grand scheme. It's still technically training, and lots of working from home and flexibility and such. But I may still faint.

So back in the woo-woo now, baking fantasies coming on strong. And kind of tired. I know, I know, TRANSITION, give it time, blah blah. I had the uh-oh feeling at a first day of a job once, and this wasn't like that, except it kind of was. I'm determined to make it till the first paycheck because hi ho that's what it's really all about, no? So ask me again when I'm rolling in a (small) pile of $100 bills--my eyes will have turned to dollar signs and I'll be making the ching ching sound (do cash registers still make that sound?) I'll be all working is the best thing ever. Baking fantasies are for pansies!Now someone go bake me a scone and I will throw some cash at you! Be gone!

Not sure I've ever been "working is the best thing ever." And as you've got a little one likely who hasn't mastered the art of sleeping through the night every night? Don't hold your breath. Working plus mommyhood is hard stuff. I've been doing 14 years of it, and not full time either. I love many aspects of working but there is a limit to my energy and organizational ability.

Having done 14 yrs of doing the working mom thing, not sure I've ever reached the point where I've felt that "working is the best thing ever." And as you've got a little one who likely hasn't mastered the art of sleeping through the night every night? Don't hold your breath. I love many aspects of working but there is a limit to my energy and organizational ability.

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