I pray that God will grant me the serenity to accept the things I can't change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I killed because they were annoying.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

I can’t believe a whole lot of things and emotions could bare themselves in less than 8 hours. It happened – just like that.

The transfer was a no-go. I’m staying put. The Dutchman was not happy but he’ll get over it. I hope I will get over the fact that I have caused a stir. Things will be awkward between us for a while but we’ll get over it. At least, I hope we will.

So that’s that and I’m ready to move on.

I had lunch with a couple of good friends – good company is always the best remedy for a troubled soul. In between checking out girls passing by the eatery and stuffing their face silly with good food, they managed to humour me. Thanks guys. You’re definitely the best!

A friend who joined us later on made my day by offering me 3 days 2 nights stay in Bali. Now how can I say NO to that? Yippee!!!

The guys were really cool about it though the whining was pretty obvious. Hahah. I bought them off with Starbucks coffee. You were ‘that’ easy to please, guys! Heheh.

Things were getting better by the minute when the compliance officer confirmed that the 3 risk assessment documents that we filled out were not needed after all. Yey again!

A colleague from IT asked if I was interested in a position they have in their department and that he’s willing to put in some good words for me.

I couldn’t believe my ears! Yey for the third time then!

I was scheduled to see the Big Boss (my boss’ boss) to sign the appraisal form before she leaves the company, which is tomorrow (Friday).

As soon as she opened her mouth and said I got a 3 (meet expectations), all happiness literally vanished and the room seemed to shrink to a ridiculous size. I even thought I saw evil horns growing out of her skull. Sprout fangs and I swear she’s devil’s twin sister from hell - seriously.

I asked her why and she said I did not produce any tangible result and that she had no idea what I was doing. Again, this is the same person that I sent weekly and monthly report to.

She mentioned that I did not ‘do wonders’ to the projects I managed and that delivering things on time are not considered as performing or exceeding the expectation. Unless if I managed to bring millions to the company.

Those were projects that I was asked to take over because it dragged on for more than a year and I managed to get it done within the agreed time. I guess saving a few thousands was not as grand as bringing in millions.

I didn’t know if I was more upset at the rating she gave or the reason why she gave it.

She happily signed the form and wrote the number ‘3’ as clearly as she could on the form. It reminded me of Delores Umbridge in Harry Potter: Order of the Phoenix. The similarity was uncanny - especially when she handed me the form and a pen for me to sign on the dotted line. I took the form and stared at it.

‘I don’t want a 3 for my rating.’

The words escaped my lips. She stared at me and said nothing. I told her that I need to speak to my boss and I am refusing a 3-rating. Took the form and left her room. I was fuming mad. I had every right to, if you ask me.

I told my boss and stood my ground. He agreed that I should get a better rating. He promised to see the SVP of HR on Monday to sort things out.

I couldn’t concentrate on work anymore and it was quitting time. I packed and headed for the door when my boss called me and said, ‘Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of your rating’.

My boss is one good man.

I am really grateful to have the guys and TF to share the story with. They were insane most of the times and I love them to bits. I don’t even want to imagine being in I*G without them.

Monday, February 18, 2008

I have to apologize coz I didn’t get to do anything during those 2 days except eat and sleep. Took the meds and went straight to slumber. Every darn time.

Here’s something that I’d like to share.

Day 1:Boss: So what do you want me to tell him?Staff: Er.. I don’t know.. yet..

Day 2:Boss: Okay. I’m just gonna tell him that I’m not letting you go.Staff: Huh? Well okay then.Boss: I’m meeting the CEO and SVP of HR to discuss our future here. They might ask me to leave, it’s possible. Just be ready for the outcome.Staff: -Gulp-

Big Boss: I have tendered my resignation today and I’ll be out of here by end of the month.Staff: - gulp-

Boss: (after the meeting). We’re gonna stop doing whatever it is that we’re doing and start on 6 Sigma. People are gonna hate us, so brace yourself.Staff: Great. Oh by the way, your boss is leaving.Boss: -gulp-

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

I sat on the bed, hoping that it would pass. That breathing would be natural and easy.

It didn’t work.

The first thing that came to mind was that I had some sort of thick phlegm stuck at the back of my throat. I tried pushing it forward but it was too painful. I tried swallowing but it wouldn’t budge. It’s awful and darn painful too.

I was out of idea. I tried to be calm, knowing that panicking will do me no good.

I walked to the bathroom and checked in the mirror. No luck there. I tried the pushing and swallowing again but to no avail. I ended up vomiting nothing but saliva.

I tried checking it again in the mirror on the closet. Nada. Couldn’t see a thing.

By then, I was on the verge of freaking out. I woke Deli up to help check my throat.

‘Your tonsil’s swollen,’ he said.

‘You need to see a doctor,’ he continued and went back to sleep. Okay. That didn’t sound good.

It was really difficult to breathe by then. I reached for the toothbrush only to put it back to avoid further torture to my throat. I suppose Listerine would do just fine. I hate gargling. I have never really grasped the concept.

Deli was still asleep when I was done with Listerine.

‘Hurry or I’ll die soon!’

That proved to be a pretty powerful statement because he woke up immediately and ushered the kids to the bathroom.

We reached the accident and emergency department at 6.15am but the doctor in charge was working on an emergency case. It was a good 20 minutes wait before I was called.

That was the longest 20 minutes in my life. I could still feel the swelling but it was not as bad as it was half an hour ago. I could practically jiggle the tonsil with my tongue. It was like having a candy stuck in there.

I could barely utter proper words. It was like a bad flu.

The doctor confirmed that my tonsil was indeed the size of Yankee stadium. He bestowed upon me 2 days off to deal with the thingy. I should expect high fever in a day or two. If the swelling persists accompanied by white spots, I should come to the hospital to be admitted and have meds pumped to my veins.

In the meantime, I need to take the meds he gave me and pray to get better soon.

By then, the swelling has reduced to a less noticeable size. I could breathe much better. Thank God. Today’s not my last day on earth (yet).

When we got home, I noticed some rash on my hands. Upon further checking, I found itchy spots especially around my elbows. Like a bad rash or a bad allergic reaction.

Allergy? Could that be the reason why I’m experiencing all these? Oh darn. The doctor mentioned something about infection but allergy was never brought up.

Under Deli’s watchful eyes, I unloaded the meds from their respective packs and stared at them with great interest.

There I was with lumpy throat and there were the meds – big fat tablets that I need to take to reduce the swelling and help with the pain.

Did I mention the tablets were HUGE?

I have constricted throat and huge tablets. How is that possible? Does it make sense to you?

So it’s either do or die (practically la). It was not a pretty sight – shoving the meds down my throat and trying hard not to vomit, but I managed to do so. With great difficulty, of course.

Urgh.

So. That’s my story today. I hope your day’s better than mine.

P/s: I have tonnes of backdated entries. Maybe I’ll make full use of my 2 off days and publish them in here.