You need to see a mental doctor so he can get you on anti-depressants. The cure for your depression is only a pill away. Trust me I've been where you are except I took 70 sleeping pills one night and woke up from a coma three days later. Then I went to a mental hospital where I met my doctor. He got me on the right meds so I'm not suicidual anymore. I'm a schizo but its the same feelings as far as suicide goes.