"Come on you greens!" No, this is not a new battle cry to rouse the eco-minded folk among us. It happens to be the closest I can get living in Cornwall to hearing either a Football League or Premier League chant.

Yes, Plymouth Argyle are based in the neighbouring county of Devon (boo, hiss), but that doesn't stop the Penzance-to-Plymouth trains filling up with Cornish supporters wearing green shirts on the Saturdays when the Pilgrims are playing at home.

The irony, of course, is that the Pilgrims are far from being green in the environmental sense. Due to being located deep in the West Country, they are probably the most travelled set of supporters in the entire Football League. Just think about what those poor Pilgrims will have to endure in two weeks time.

The Championship fixture computer has dictated that on Tuesday, October 28, they play Sheffield Wednesday away in the league, then just four days later they return to the Steel City to play Sheffield United. Those two return journeys mean the Pilgrims will have to travel 948 miles in four days. And two weeks later it's Coventry City away. (Just think if they were playing in Europe, too. OK, now I'm getting carried away.)

But if there were a league of environmental purity for football teams, who would be champions? It's a question being asked in the forthcoming edition of Ethical Consumer magazine. It largely sticks to assessing Premier League sides, but the results are interesting nonetheless. When looking at just the environmental credentials of the stadium alone, then Manchester City's Eastlands comes out top with its recycling initiatives, on-site electric vehicles, and experiments with rainwater toilets and solar energy. (Apparently, plans to install an 85-metre wind turbine to power the stadium are on hold due to fears about ice falling from the blades in winter!)

"Most significantly," says Ethical Consumer, "Man City has also worked with the local council and public transport providers to co-ordinate buses and trains and to promote safe walking and cycling routes. According to Pete Bradshaw, head of corporate responsibility at the club, this has led to a 50% cut in the number of parking spaces needed, with over 70% of fans coming to matches on foot or by bus." (Non-league Dartford actually gets the top marks for its new "eco stadium" which collects 20,000 litres of rainwater a day to water its pitch.)

But haven't Man City just been bought up by Abu Dhabi United Group, which is owned by the emirate's oil-rich family? How does that affect Man City's eco rating? Well, Ethical Consumer has also assessed the clubs in terms of the environmental and ethical credentials of their owners. Needless to say, most of the Premiership clubs fare pretty badly on this front with their rag-tag mix of super-rich owners, many of whom, according to the magazine, have their fingers in all manner of unethical pies.

In fact, none of the Premier League teams achieve an "ethiscore" higher than 10 out of 20. Aston Villa, Bolton Wanderers, Hull City, Middlesbrough, Portsmouth, Stoke City, Sunderland, West Bromwich Albion and Wigan all achieve this "winning" score. However, it's not the Big Four that prop up the table (Arsenal, 9; Man Utd 8.5; Liverpool, 8; Chelsea, 8), but Blackburn Rovers who score just 6 out of 20. They are marked down for being "majority controlled by a trust representing the Walker family, whose money came from enterprises including Flybe and steel manufacturing".

Ethical Consumer rounds off its analysis with a grading of the teams according to the ethics of their principal sponsors. Stoke City win big (13 out of 20) by having Britannia Building Society emblazoned across their players' chests, whereas Arsenal and Man Utd prop up the bottom of the table for once for having Emirates and AIG on their shirts – two companies that the magazine has roundly criticised in the past.

Ranking teams by ethics rather than goals scored is an illuminating experiment, but it has one obvious flaw: as a rule (yes, we all know the exceptions), people don't shop around for the best football clubs like they do with, say, supermarkets or energy suppliers. We're lumbered with the clubs we grew up supporting. Football is a logic-free zone, and will remain so. Despite all the protests about the often whimsical and illogical decision-making by owners (see Newcastle's treatment of Kevin Keegan and Man City's treatment of Sven-Goran Eriksson in recent months), very few fans ever boycott or change their club.