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[CHALLENGE] Crack Relationships

Challenge: Okay this is very simple. Here in this post, there will be two tables. A table for male champions and a table for female champions. You use a number randomizer for each table to get two champions. (Or you can roll twice on the same table. I'm not against slash.) Then you write a quick one shot describing a romance between those two characters. After a page or so, I'll pick my favorite. Then that person gets to pick their favorite from the next page and so on and so on. Basically this is just for fun.

Having veritably ambushed the ape just after his training as he was returning to the institute, LeBlanc had found herself strangely interested in Wukong... the nation of monkeys unknown and perhaps a threat to her power base. Unlikely, but her near constant paranoia led her to inquire.

"Hmm... Done so early? I would think Yi would make you work 'till you dropped."

Wukong jumped at the surprise, turning to face the mage just as she had snuck up on him.

"Bah! Give me a heart attack... Y-yeah. I don't usually stop this early. I have a match here in a few."
"Ah... Inconvenient. I just wanted to ask a few questions... hmm?"
"Uh, alright. You are..."
"LeBlanc. And you are Wukong, no? I'd be surprised if another monkey were a champion here I didn't know of."
"Nah, that's me. Wukong." - He flexes a couple of times in jest before her, which is met by a strange look.
"Quite... But I would like to know... Your homeland, what was it like there?"
"A lot less boring than here, that's for sure. And all the people there had fur. This place is a lot stranger."
"Ah. And, how many were there? Was it a peaceful place?"
"Not really, something was ALWAYS going down. Oh! You meant as in war. Not really, maybe a few fights with a giant daggerplant or something."

They talked for quite a while, even after Wukong came back from the League match, LeBlanc actually finding herself interested in the prankster. In under a week they had formed a fast friendship. LeBlanc tactfully dodging around the unpleasant practices of her homeland.

One evening as they sat under a tree looking out to the stars, their conversation had died down to nothing more than her leaning on his shoulder, she ventured for a kiss - and in a puff of white smoke the ape disappeared. A half-eaten peach lay on the ground, to which the deceiver stared at in confusion.

"Oh! That's where my dinner went!" Called Wukong from behind the tree. "Oh, hey LeBlanc. Sorry about the clone, was practicing with Yi and I think one got loose. We can talk after, ok?"

She didn't reply.

"Ok?"

In a puff of smoke the deceiver disappeared as well. Wukong shrugged and continued his training.

Just for the fun of it, I rolled twice on the male table and ended up with Singed and Malzahar. I also rolled twice on the female table and ended up with Lux and Leona. I might do something with those tomorrow.

Malzahar walked slowly into the room, this section of the institute surrounded in a clear material sealed tight. The entrance was an airlock, and he soon learned why it was necessary. The tangy pinch of chemical odor hit his senses like a brick, and the bipedal abomination behind him voiced his complaint as well.

"Ahck! Shmells like... I unno."

Malzahar didn't reply, but Kog'Maw was obviously sick... He was suffering from some sort of illness since his match earlier that week, and Malzahar was worried for the poor creature. That had led him to seek out the aid of someone with medical experience... At least enough to identify the problem. Unfortunately, only one chemist in the League, most likely Valoran as well, would get anywhere near Kog'Maw.

"Singed? Sorry to interrupt your work, but I have an issue."

Only the bubbling of various concoctions answered him. The purple-robed sorcerer continued deeper into the chamber, alarmed that he didn't need to discourage his void companion from eating anything. To his surprise, he heard a voice, a deep and suave one call out from behind him.

"Who's in here? If it's you again Soraka, help me, I'll put you through the ****ed wall." The chemist entered his chambers with a slight bit of annoyance, his rarely seen naturally strawberry blonde hair, slightly sunburned skin - however little of it was visible - and surfboard indicating he had been away for a while.

"Ah, it's you Malz. Sorry about that. I've been away for a while now."

"So I see..." The sorcerer looked over the chemist, completely unused to the man's unburnt hair and general... attractiveness? Malzahar perished the thought.
"I had a question, Singed. My friend here is suffering from an unknown illness. I need professional help."

"Hmm..." Singed bent down to examine the creature, before standing back up and away realizing how terrible of an idea that was. "Maybe it was something he ate?"

Malz responded with a blank stare. "We've already had that one figured out. More important is how to cure him."

"Not my strong suit, but I can always give him something to induce vomiting."
"That would be unadvised - wait, you know what? He hasn't been vomiting as much lately as he should. We should give it a try."

Kog'Maw was too busy daydreaming of how the chemist would taste to notice the bottle shoved into his mouth. He swallowed by reflex. But nothing happened. Bewildered, Malzahar bent to look at th-BLRGHLRG!

It worked instantly, the acidic slime burning through the majority of the mage's clothing. Luckily enough to still leave him decent. Singed couldn't help but chuckle. He found himself oddly enraptured by the sorcerer's tanned skin and perfect body seemingly chiseled from stone.

"I uh... Am glad I could help."

Malzahar picked up on Singed's stare and returned it.

"You know singed, you should really fix yourself up like this more often..."
"You should take off your robes more often."

Almost in shock, Malzahar let the words float in his mind before impulse caused him to embrace the chemist, drinking in his body, still warm from the sun. Singed pressed himself closer, feeling every hot breath from the sorcerer in the cold, sterile laboratory. Malzahar was pained as he tore himself away, blushing madly and saying.

"I-I'm sorry. I think I have a match in a few moments..."

Malzahar and Kog'Maw turned to walk out of the lab, leaving Singed to stand a while in thought. And an idea struck him, and he sprayed suntan lotion from the bottle on his back all over the mage, the sticky substance pinning him to the ground.

"You aren't going anywhere yet~"

Come on, someone other than me has to be interested in doing these. My next one's going to be Leona and Lux! You won't want to miss it! And every other person who contributes before I post it I'll make it that much better!

Out of curiousity just to see what I would get, I actually rolled on it yesterday. I ended up with 1/22. Thats right, Alistar/Tristana. It only took me 5 minutes to give up on trying to make that one work. So I rolled again, 38/3. not wanting to impinge on a certain angry croc god's territory, I just decided to give up there.

Out of curiousity just to see what I would get, I actually rolled on it yesterday. I ended up with 1/22. Thats right, Alistar/Tristana. It only took me 5 minutes to give up on trying to make that one work. So I rolled again, 38/3. not wanting to impinge on a certain angry croc god's territory, I just decided to give up there.

You're not trying hard enough! Can't you grasp that true love comes from the soul, no matter who it is between? Teemo's coercion is slowly driving Alistar mad while he can't get to his true love, Tristana. Her eyes have been dull and grey as she's been growing increasingly dissatisfied with Teemo... He never takes her anywhere and never satisfies her emotional needs!

Orianna was walking around the institute having just been inducted to the league she was eager to explore. She was casually following ball when it turned a corner suddenly speeding off into a dark chamber.

"Ball? Where are you hiding? Orianna said as she entered the pitch black chamber. Ball you know I dislike hide and seek. Then she saw it. Ball's faint blue light could be seen some distance away darting to and fro.
She could hear a voice next to it. " Some new toy used to play games with me?" it said. "When I'm free your... pathetic little toys will not stop me from hunting every...last... one of you."

"Ball does not like being called names." Orianna said. Nocturne immediately turned his blades at the ready thinking "Who would be foolish enough to enter my prison...? Unless... its another one of their tricks." Nocturne saw the illuminated sphere float gently towards a woman. Laughing to himself he was amazed at the gall of these summoners. He would savor this kill having been so long since his last. He wanted...no needed to milk every iota of fear from his prey.

"Are you ok Ball?" Orianna said curiously seemingly oblivious to the danger surrounding her. It circled her head rapidly as it often did before an attack. Nocturne lunged out of the darkness his blade aimed to decapitate the intruder. Before his blade could meet her neck it was inexplicably bent backwards from a field surrounding Orianna.

Orianna looked down at the hunched form "That looked painful...You are made differently from the others." Orianna said coldly. Turning Nocturne projected himself as her worst fear but was amazed to find that he couldn't read her it was then he noticed that she was a machine.

"AGHRRH. MORE GAMES SUMMONERS." yelled Nocturne in the dark room lit only by the faint light of Ball. Orianna could not sense his anger but she loved games. "Do you play games as well?" she asked. "I think they look fun myself. Do you play games often?" She asked Nocturne still seemingly oblivious.

"Go away from my chambers, leave me to my torment." Nocturne said floating away. Orianna was confused "Maybe Ball did something?" she thought. "Ball did not mean to break you." Orianna said emotionlessly. "They send a machine to further my torment expressing no fear to ease my pain." Nocturne said aimlessly. "Fear?" quipped Orianna. "I do not feel fear nor anything for that matter." she said. "But since you seem to need it lets play a game."

Nocturne turned facing the emotionless construct. A alien emotion surging from him. His thoughts trailed at the machines request and apparent concern. He would play her game...and he would have fun.