Now since you claim to invoke artistic license onto this photo I'm going to have to give you a composition 101 lesson because you clearly need it.

First, by arbitrarily choosing a point around which to draw the tilt shift you inadvertently draw the viewer's eye not to where you want it to go (the teams on the ice rink) but instead to the point which causes the viewer the greatest amount of stress: the box at which the photo becomes blurry all around the photo. This first part is completely unnecessary by itself. This photo does not need tilt shift. At all. But I'll give you a pass on that one because this isn't personal after all.

The second problem is that your actual execution of the effect to the photo is the sloppiest thing I've ever seen. On the first photo alone you cut the standing guy's head in half with the effect, you blur out a couple of the players on the edge along with a huge portion of the ice rink (again, your image's focus) and at the same time you leave complete focus on a random blob of people in the background right above the rink only to be cut off again at a random point above their heads. Just by blurring out the guy's head that's so close to the camera that you could see whether or not he had lice (well of course only if it wasn't blurry) you immediately force the viewer to wonder what the hell is wrong with the photo.

But the main problem is that when you do all of this you completely ruin your photo with respect to the purpose for which it was taken: to show the damn hockey teams in the first place. Every eye that sees this photo is going to wander around because nothing is in focus! Eyes need focus and it makes them uncomfortable. There's a reason why tilt shift sometimes works on cityscapes (and even then just about never) and that's because the detail is all around to focus on and when they tilt shift those photos it's because the photographer wants you to focus on a few building in particular.

Now before you take all this personal I know that this kind of shit is all the rage on Instagram and Pintrest and that's probably what you took this photo in the first place. But the reason you shouldn't use an effect like this at all on these photos especially is because there's already a huge damn focal point that draws the eye to where you want it to go in the first place: the huge damn white spot with the super dark contrasting figures standing on it. Now if there's one thing that eyes like as much as focus it's contrast. If you don't believe me go show these pictures to a bunch of people and ask which one they prefer. Not a single person is going to like the blurry shit given a choice between the two and I promise you that not a one is going to think that what you did to these was in any way "artistic."

I don't mean to beat an already pulverized horse but I'm not even in the liberal arts program at RIT and I know this shit. Just remember that you asked.