How it is: Veterans Day has new meaning in soldier's families

THE PAST FOUR Veterans Days have been different for me. I've always admired our military heroes, the men and women who have sacrificed their time, energy and some their limbs and lives to serve our country. I have always thanked them for their service when given the opportunity or lent a helping hand when I was able.

The faces of veterans are changing, though. Beside a craggy-faced 65-year-old from the Vietnam War or an octogenarian from World War II now stand 22- through 30-year-old men and women. They have lined faces and faraway stares, with visible scars and scars unseen. While many of their friends were in college having keg parties, most of our new veterans were in Iraq or Afghanistan serving their country, witnessing horrific scenes and losing comrades. With life chipping away at their humanity, they persevered.

What I have learned, since my own son and the sons and daughters of my friends became veterans, is with the end of their military career — where staying alive was a primary concern — often comes new problems. From PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and mapping the VA bureaucracy, to finding jobs, to translating rifleman or tow-gunner to a resume, to dealing with people who don't know how to work as a team or how to give it their all, or to having time to mourn their losses, being a veteran can be hard work. Many of them find it difficult to function in a world where there are so few rules and where their brothers are not by their sides and watching their backs. Some of them need help.

I thought when my son got out of the Marine Corps people would line up to hire him. Who wouldn't want a man who could work four or five days in a row with no sleep? Or make decisions with bullets flying at his head? Someone who did not think calling in sick was an option? I was surprised and disappointed to find that some employee applications wouldn't allow him to include his military status or history. How thoughtless of them.

This Veterans Day I salute and thank all veterans that ever served our great country. I realize now, they were all once young and someone's child.

If you have the ability to hire, please consider employing our veterans. It's a great way to say thank you.

Katie Wigington is a Novato resident. The IJ has been asking readers to share their stories of love, dating, parenting, marriage, friendship and other experiences for our How It Is column. All stories must not have been published in part or in its entirety previously. Send your stories of no more than 500 words to relating@marinij.com. Please write How It Is in the subject line. The IJ reserves the right to edit them for publication. Please include your full name, address and a daytime phone number.