Friday, 19 September 2014

On the Ledge

That's a loooong way down...

There are moments in your life when you feel like you're at the edge of a cliff, you can't see what's ahead, just darkness. You're scared that if you step off your ledge, you may plummet to your doom. Yup, that pretty much describes how I feel right now.

I finally have an idea what course I want to go for, but I can't bring myself to make the plunge and tell my parents. My failed Chemistry test isn't going to help things along either.

Back to the cliff-thingy. When you are pushed back on to one of those metaphorical ledges of comfort, you have two options: step away from the metaphorical edge and stay safe, or step forward. If you step forward, one of two things can happen to you: You have a pretty good chance to plummet to your imminent metaphorical doom. Or you could find that you've stepped on to a hidden bridge which will take you to the other side where everyday is metaphorical spring. (Yes, a lot of metaphors. I know.)

I've always hated decisions like those, and decisions in general. Once you pick an option it just seems all the other doors shut right away. Once you step off the ledge, either you survive or you don't. You can't step back. Indecision (and occasionally indigestion) is the bane of every teenager's existence.

Choices are a complicated thing. Each choice could have life-altering consequences. A choice can change your story, for better or for worse. Choices are never black and white, but always a subtle shade of grey. It seems so much easier not to choose. But then, if the hero doesn't make a choice, how will the story move forward? Iron-Man can't defeat the Mandarin if he can't choose whether he will or won't. So choices are inevitable. Yes, they are scary, but your choices become who you are. So if you never choose to be anything, you will end up as Nothing.

Our Choices make us who we are, and that is something no one can change. Things may go bad, our life might end in ruins, we may get kicked, stabbed, beaten down. But we still have the choice to get up and dust ourselves off. I won't go as far as to quote so-called "Success Guides" who advise people to bury their heads underground and think everything will be fine. Nothing will be fine. You can't live your life if everything is just fine. But when you pick an option, sure a few doors shut but perhaps, a few new doors open up too. So, at the end of the day, scary as they may be, our choices are inevitable. And perhaps, they were never so complicated. You just thought they were.

Once more back unto the cliff. We have three choices: a) step back b) fall c) find a bridge to success land. Or may be there's a fourth option. We fly.We can find a place no one else has ever seen, and live our lives as we want them to be. I know, it's a long-shot.
But it's a chance I'm willing to take.