I like big fake titties. The bigger and fakier, the better. Thus, I am opposed to rebuilding the Berlin Wall. We need those raw materials to make more fake titties. Get your priorities straight, Sprocket.
Right choad is hover-handing that tasty morsel. Party foul.

3:04 pm November, 26Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Now dancing on the main staaaage, lets give it up for Porsche (or Mercedes or whatever stupid fucking name she thinks makes her sound classy). She looks like a pro around a pole (stripper- and man- )

4:21 pm November, 26Nancy Dreuche said...

How did women get any attention pre fake boobies?
.
And hover hand needs to be added to the list of douche gestures. All it is is posturing. Obviously they don’t know the girl well enough to touch her but they want it to look like they’ve totally tapped it. Well, if you had your penis inside of her recently whats so scary about touching her side for a photo op?

4:32 pm November, 26Nostradouchus said...

‘Roids on the left, totally original tattoos on the right. Poor career moves all around.

5:29 pm November, 26The Dude said...

Svetlana makes me svet.

5:31 pm November, 26Douche Springsteen said...

Is that our old friend Donkey Douche? I’m 2 days into a bourbon bender with my brother so things are looking a bit fuzzy.

5:47 pm November, 26Jeet Kune Douche said...

Yo Wedgie,
I wouldn’t worry about Reverse Red Cap Choadboi. Something tells me Blonde Bionic Boobage feels about as sexually threatened by him as she would by her kid sister.

6:12 pm November, 26YodaBag said...

She has legs exactly like I like them….

Feet on one end, pussy on the other.

6:46 pm November, 26DoucheyWallnuts said...

Women got all kinds of attention before fake boobies. Ask Sharon Tate and Natalie Wood, to name a pair.
.
Pectorals

7:11 pm November, 26Wedgie said...

^Mansonite

7:25 pm November, 26Nancy Dreuche said...

@DW, exactly. I’m just wondering why women get them is all. Like what’s the point? It can’t be to impress guys like Wedgie, because really where’s the pay off there?

8:00 pm November, 26fatness said...

Never had much use for ‘enhanced’ boobies. Always have been a connoisseur of the natural product, myself. There is little better in life than cozying up to the soft warmth of a nice pair of naturals at 3 AM.
.
what?

8:09 pm November, 26wonderdouche twin said...

@Nancy they want something to show their neighbors grandkids at the old home when they are 82. Look how perky my tits still are you want to touch them for a piece of candy? and the kids run off yelling cause the crazy lady asked them to touch her lumpy stomach. Same as the douchbags with their tats on their overbuilt arms, really what will they look like at 70? Hell Jack LaLanne didn’t look THAT great at the end and that guy was baddass his whole life! If he had gotten tats in his golden years they would have ended up pretty rough.

9:50 pm November, 26stickdaddy said...

They want to DP her badly.
.
Because they pine for the hidden friction of each other’s weenus through the wall of her grainy fart-box.

10:33 pm November, 26Guid is Good said...

She is too short for her breasts.

11:25 pm November, 26The Dude said...

Svetlana likes my svetty balls.

11:30 pm November, 26The Dude said...

Svetlana’s breasts come with a local GPS for areolial circumnavigation.

11:37 pm November, 26The Dude said...

Svetlana’s nipples are in a Lagrangian halo orbit around the L2 point between the mutual gravitational center between each breast and my svetsticles.

11:40 pm November, 26The Dude said...

^L2 point around
.
.
okay, my fingers were drawn by the Lagrangian thing into making me sound like an orbital artifact.

Further update on my first Thanksgiving party: viddles included a turkey the size of an Irish Wolf Hound, several stuffings & numerous salads featuring walnuts in their composition, pecan and pumpkin pies, ice cream, chantilly cream, fruit salad. The only thing missing: we didn’t fry up a mess’o’catfish. Isn’t that a traditional thing?

Allen’s Woody

6:16 am November, 27CB Popped said...

This site is making me appreciate fake breasts.

Douchebag prototypes 1 +2.

6:40 am November, 27Et Tu Douche? said...

@Tall Guy,

Re; a mess’o’catfish. It depends on what part of the country your in.

7:07 am November, 27Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, we fry up a mess of mule meat stuffed inside of horse meat, stuffed inside of a cow. It’s a delicacy in my part of the country.

@Tall Guy
.
In Canada we go noodling for catfish (they are called barbute here by the quebeckers)in frozen sluiceways in the light of burning rubber tires and eat them raw in the cool glow of dioxins from the effluent of our once proud industrial base. I’m so hung over I bet I look like Nancy Dreuche’s loose, HPV infected anal fish.
.
Warts

8:10 am November, 27Nancy Dreuche said...

@Rev, you’re not really a morning person are you. Hey, use this current mindset and channel into some rants for me. The deadline is fast approaching. My Douchie isn’t gonna write itself.

8:15 am November, 27Charles Douchewin said...

Thanks DB1.

I thought I’d come out of the anonymous category and claim responsibility for my Khrushchev comment.

Perhaps I should mock more often.

Looking forward to the Douchie awards.

10:30 am November, 27DarkSock said...

I love the smell of thread-meme attempts in the morning…ergo:
.
Her stare could make Khrushchev shit in his loafer and THEN put his shoe back on.

fake boobies aside for a mo, isn’t she (that gal up top surrounded by the two homosexuals) about 14 years old or something?

Anyway, my thank you note to Saturday’s host went out with yesterday’s mail and after having my Thanksgiving cherry popped I can honestly say its given me a feeling of wanting more. Kinda like how a girl once described her first sexual encounter to me. In writing this, I’m actually hoping that both Dreuche & Kroeger will reveal the more juicier details from the trauma of their defloration. Over to you, you two…

11:35 am November, 27Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, I just updated my Facebook status from “In a relationship” with RevChad to “No fucking way” with RevChad. So you’ll have to get the deets from him. Unless he makes it up to me by doing me a solid and getting this Douchie business off my plate. I will tell you this, the whole Jesus sized cocck description is a bit of an exaggeration.

Anton presents his ever impressive invisible porch beef. From the spread of his grip he’s sporting a fairly large slab of meat.
.
Or cradling Lil’ Smokey.that’s just too shy to stick its head out. Either way short shorts and boobs make for a perfect Sunday.