I'd severely injured my knee some months beforehand, and required surgery to fix it. I was still on crutches and a had a knee brace, but was back at work.

A work conference interstate came up, and I had to fly up to attend. I was getting ready to check in for the flight home when it happened. Around 9am in a very busy airport, I went up to the self-check in screen, realised it was out of order, and stepped back - right onto my own suitcase. Naturally, being on crutches and already off-balance, I went down, hard, on my butt. Yes, hundreds of people waiting to check-in witnessed it.

I was quickly surrounded by 4 groundstaff and 3 Federal police officers, who fussed and bothered and fussed again, which made me even more embarrassed. I was helped up, and assisted (not needed, I swear!) over to a counter, where I had to fill in an incident report, and the wonderful groundstaff gave me priority check-in ahead of the hundreds of people waiting. I was treated like the specialest of special snowflakes.

The only redeeming thing was one of the Federal police officers, who joked to me 'Yeah, you did that on purpose to skip the queue, didn't you?' To which I replied 'Curses, my cunning plan has been revealed!' It helps to laugh at yourself when you totally, totally make a fool of yourself!

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Out on the patio we'd sit,And the humidity we'd breathe,We'd watch the lightning crack over canefieldsLaugh and think, this is Australia.

Non-embarrassing background: The day of our original flight, middle son pricked his hand on a needle that had been planted in the bathroom. This necessitated paramedics, TSA and city police. Thankfully DS suffered no ill effects, other than the icky factor of a 6 month round of anti-retrovirals and monthly blood tests.

Embarrassing Part: We were finally able to finish with the medical stuff and get a plane back home. My ticket must have been flagged because as soon as I checked in using the self-check terminal, airline agents and TSA agents appeared out of nowhere to escort us through security, get us anything we needed and in general make our trip to the gate and getting on the plane as pleasant as possible. I think they were bending over backwards in case I decided to sue, but man did our little group attract a lot of attention.

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Some people lift weights. I lift measures. It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

I stopped once for gas after work, so I was still in business casual with heels. After placing the pump into my tank and starting to refuel I decided the best option for me at the time was to step over the hose to put my card back in my purse (which was in the car still). Suffice to say I didn't clear the gas hose. My right heel caught the hose and I did a full side plant. I think I turned six shades of read and really wished the ground would swallow me up, since I was not the only at the station at the time.

Oh bless your heart, I've done similar. Running up on to a curb at shopping center for the mailbox there, the front of my sandals' bottom didn't quite clear the curb and down I went. There's a feeling like everyone in a five mile radius saw or at least somehow knows what you did.

I always say when you're a kid and you fall, you make sure you aren't hurt, but as an adult, when you do a face plant, first thing you do is look around to see how many witnesses there are!

The falling stories reminded me of one of my own. I enjoy ice skating. As an adult, I'm not nearly as spry as some of the kids that go zipping around the ice. Thankfully, the rink I used to frequent had special ice time for adults who were trying to learn actual figure skating (as opposed to just enjoying the ice). I used to go to those sessions all the time, and they were surprisingly popular. I had just finished a class where we had learned our very first "real" jump (a toe loop, I think), so I was practicing. I fell a number of times, but the embarrassing part wasn't just that I fell, but that in one of those I took down this amazingly good looking man along with me, and wound up on my back, on the ice, with his knee and hand pinning me down in places where strangers shouldn't be touching. It took at least a week before I could talk to that man again.

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Some people lift weights. I lift measures. It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

Well, let's see.....Oh yeah, there was the time I was working at a bank in the check processing department and was going through the lobby picking up work from the various stations. I stopped by the restroom first before heading out to the lobby. Upon exiting the restroom, I stopped at the water fountain for a sip of water. One of the loan officers was exiting the men's room, and waited behind me to use the water fountain. I finished with the water and headed toward the lobby with him following me. I was stopped by the lady who took care of the safe deposit boxes. The loan officer passed me and went to his department. She told me that I needed to fix my skirt. Yeah, I had tucked my skirt into the back of my pantyhose, and had walked all that way with the loan officer merrily following me.

Well, let's see.....Oh yeah, there was the time I was working at a bank in the check processing department and was going through the lobby picking up work from the various stations. I stopped by the restroom first before heading out to the lobby. Upon exiting the restroom, I stopped at the water fountain for a sip of water. One of the loan officers was exiting the men's room, and waited behind me to use the water fountain. I finished with the water and headed toward the lobby with him following me. I was stopped by the lady who took care of the safe deposit boxes. The loan officer passed me and went to his department. She told me that I needed to fix my skirt. Yeah, I had tucked my skirt into the back of my pantyhose, and had walked all that way with the loan officer merrily following me.

Your story made me giggle (sorry) but especially because of your user name

As I was walking into work one morning, a very polite male co-worker held the door open for me. He was visiting our office from our site in India, so I didn't know him at all except by sight. As I passed through the door I turned kind of sideways so as not to brush against him and in doing so, the tote bag I was carrying, which contained two cans of diet Pepsi in addition to some other objects, swung around with a good deal of momentum and hit him squarely in the...umm...coconuts.

The Slit Skirt

During a rare quiet moment when I worked at an urgent care I was standing in the reception area with my back to the waiting room, doing some filing. I was wearing a knee-length black skirt with a small V-slit in the back. Suddenly my co-worker Sally, who always spoke at jet-engine-level volume, practically screamed, "Hey bansidhe, did you know your skirt has a slit in it?" Confused, I answered, "Yes, it's supposed to." She shouted in response, "Well it goes up kind of high so I thought I should say something."

So everyone in the very crowded waiting room got to find out along with me that the back seam in my skirt had come unraveled to about mid-butt level.

Pierre

When I worked weekend shifts at an animal hospital, Mrs. Smith frequently came in to pick up medication or food for her poodle Pierre. She'd been doing this for some time so even though I worked emergency shift and never saw her or Pierre when they came in for regular appointments, I always recognized her and asked how Pierre was doing.

One Saturday afternoon Mrs. Smith dropped by the hospital when I was working and I cheerfully, said, "Hi! What's Pierre up to these days? Are you here to pick up food for him?"

She responded, "He died the day before yesterday. I'm here to pick up his ashes."

Mine was super gluing my eye shut, causing a corneal abrasion, and then super gluing the superglue container to my clenched fist. This was my first and last attempt at false eyelashes, and it resulted in an ER visit.

What made it so ironic was I had been yakking on the phone earlier and we were laughing at the instructions on the super glue container to keep this out of your eyes. What kind of idiot needs to be told this?!?

Accidentally farted in class. In Seventh Grade. Got laughed at by my crush. And gained a reputation that stayed with me until High School, just from that one little 'toot' when I shifted in my seat.

That's not so bad compared to some of these other stories, but it pretty much killed my self esteem for a while.

Oh yes. The joys of childhood and jr. high embarassment. I had many. I am very very very nearsighted, and stink at sports. at least any that require the throwing and catching of anything since it takes me time to focus on what's heading my way and usually get hit by it. I also am clumsy and not at all graceful. Add in very shy and no self-esteem at that point in my life. So anything minor was agonizing in my mind.

I can't tell you how many times in elementary school, playing dodgeball in gym, I had the ball chucked at me, deliberately. Then there was the time in gym class playing softball, and tripping over my feet, and somersaulting.

The worst was also in 7th grade. some dumba** gym teacher decided the 7th graders could play volleyball with the 9th graders. Who were much bigger and taller. So I'm doing my best when some huge 9th grade boy spiked the ball over the net, literally into me. Hit me square in the face, and knocked me across the floor, and broke my glasses. I was humiliated, and ended up going home since I can't see squat without my glasses. To this day, even the thought of volleyball makes me cover my face with my arms.

One of many, but THIS is the one that really stands blushing face and shoulders above the rest for me:

<BG>I happen to have gone to college with a now semi-famous actor. I had a work-study job as a carpenter/scene painter for our school's theatre department, so I worked backstage for several plays he was in and got to know him pretty well. We weren't close, but we were friendly whenever we saw each other on campus, and he was very nice and down-to-earth--unlike some of the actors who were real pains in the posterior!</BG>

Anyway, one night after a performance Now Semi-Famous Actor invited everyone over to his house for a cast party. I drank very heavily at that party--and passed out drunk on his living room floor! When I came to, there he was, looking down at me with this expression on his face like, "I know I should be worried about you but this is just too d*** funny!" For getting drunk and passing out was out of character for me, you see.

Now for the REALLY embarrassing part, in retrospect: Though I haven't had much contact with him since college (I did send a congratulatory card when he got a long-term job on a TV series), I am told by mutual friends of ours that he still remembers that incident!

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“The best lightning rod for your protection is your own spine.”--Ralph Waldo Emerson

I'm pretty good at embarrassing myself but the most spectacular embarrassments have all been falls...

1) Hurrying to meet friends and running across a large, crowded, very icy square. I was holding my bag, a sleeping bag, folder and bottle of water. They spotted me just as I slipped on the ice. Because of my momentum I ended up flat on my back with my four objects scattered in various directions. If anyone hadn't seen me fall over my friends cheers and applause made saw I was the centre of attention.

2) At university going to class which was at the bottom of a very steep hill just off campus I stepped off the path to let a couple of people by and ended up sliding all the way to the bottom of the hill. My professor made that one worse by asking me if I was okay before he started the lecture.

3) And the best - I catch the train to work from a small community. You tend to start to recognise all the train people around town. One morning walking up from the train to work I jumped a curb and landed in an oil patch. Straight on to my back with the 200 odd people who catch my train every day coming up behind me. The only bright spot was the really charming and goodlooking man who helped me back onto my feet. For the next three weeks whenever I ran into a train person away from the train they would ask me how I was and if I had recovered from my tumble.

I probably fall in a spectacular fashion once every six months or so... I am learning to handle embarrassment quite well.