Hot guy #1: Sometimes her vagina smells like old cheese, and I feel like I’m suffocating down there and I’m gonna die.Hot guy #2: Just use a snorkel.Hot guy #1: Does that work?Hot guy #2: I don’t leave home without it.

Tourist lady: Excuse me, do you work here?Employee: Yes, ma’am. Can I help you?Tourist lady: Yes. Where are the toilets, please?Employee: Up the escalators and take a left.Tourist lady: Thank you. Number one or number two?Employee: Well… You can do either, ma’am…