Working from home has its perks. For starters, the commute can’t be beat—it’s bedroom to desk in five seconds flat (give or take depending on hallway traffic and how many pets I have to step over).

Working solo has its negatives too of course. Like, if I choke on a carrot stick nacho chip during my lunch break, it’s up to me to heimlich myself—there are no helpful bystanders standing by to help.

As well, if a daylight thief should happen by to burgle me, I’m on my own to fend him off (yes, I said him. I’m sure there are female cat burglars too but in my head they’re always big scary men. Sorry men. No offense). And if a homicidal maniac should hideout in my basement, I’ll be the one to get the call to inquire about whether I’ve “checked the children.”

Remember this?

So the other day as I was working hard at my desk (absolutely NOT watching Jimmy Fallon You Tube videos and bookmarking hairstyles that suit my face shape or entering an online contest to try to win a food dehydrator…) the home phone rang. I jumped. In light of recent PTSD stimulating circumstances, I’m a little on edge. I grabbed the phone and immediately looked to see was calling in case it was my kids’ school.

It wasn’t the school. The name on the call display was L. Thornbury (that’s me!) with MY phone number. Had I somehow called myself without knowing it? How could this be unless the call was coming from inside the house??

I quickly weighed my options. I could back up slowly and quietly and escape through the backdoor out into the yard—but that could be a trap. Or I could make a run for the front door but I’d have to pass the basement door and risk being dragged downstairs if the caller was hiding there, waiting.

In the end I chose neither option. Instead I answered the phone with a cautious, “hello?”

The recorded voice on the other end of the line advised that I should call them back immediately to find out how I might be eligible for lower interest rates…

Are you kidding me??

This was a sales call. A damn scam. I have no love for con artists. Get a real job, scammer! Your mother would be ashamed if she knew that this is the career path you’ve chosen. Unless this is a family business in which case she’s probably proud that you came up with this tricky new phone ploy.

Turns out this phone scam technique isn’t that new. It’s been around for a few years. It works like this…

“Technology makes it easy for scammers to “spoof” caller ID information. They can make it look like they’re calling from a different place or phone number. Even your number. Scammers use this trick as a way to get around call-blocking and hide from law enforcement. They hope you’ll be curious enough to pick up. Bottom line? These calls from your own number are illegal. Don’t pick up — or press buttons to be taken off the call list or to talk to a live person. That just leads to more calls. It’s best to ignore them, and move on with your day.” source

So instead of checking the children (impossible anyway since they’re at school) I’ll check my email instead while silently placing a curse on the heads of telescammers everywhere.