Thursday, July 23, 2009

As most smart folks do, I usually solve all of the world's problems while showering. This is where I developed the idea of the World's Worst Sandwich contest, too. Just so you know, it is banana and horseradish, for reals, trust me.

Anyhoo, with the "healthcare" thingy in my head, I entered the Think Tank this morning. As usual, I cut the ever-loving SHIT out of my throat while shaving. The morning delirium tremens usually provide the shaky hands that make shaving inherently dangerous. Being an incredibly heavy drinker (read Catholic) there are some quality of life issues that take a nutpunch in the morning.*

Now, this morning's game show attacks the "healthcare" VICTIM hierarchy. With the throat cut-ty thing going on, I wondered how I would place in the RIGHT to medical services. So, I decided to develop in my opinion the ULTIMATE PATIENT. You take a shot in the comments, too!

Here's my PRIORITY PATIENT: An illegal Haitian Muslim immigrant parolee on the sexual predator list from a child rape conviction, that is a transgendered homosexual with full blown AIDS, who pulls a HAMMY while running from the police after committing a gun murder during a botched drug deal in the 'Hood.

An unemployed, Iraq War Veterans Against the War, Black Muslim, illegal immigrant, who is shot by the IDF after attempting to take 'humanitarian aide' to the Palestinians via sailboat off the shores of Gaza.

Oops...outta town so I just now noticed that your opening paragraph was meant to call me out. Because we (the mean one and I) along with one other guy actually did this in Junior High...I'll offer my entry. Bologna and Whipped Cream. hehe Remember that?

Gnut, I do remember bologna and whipped cream, but I cannot actually remember ever eating any of them, though. You never comment, I thought you hated me, now. Or either your wife hates me, even though she has never met me.

Gnut, I do remember bologna and whipped cream, but I cannot actually remember ever eating any of them, though. You never comment, I thought you hated me, now. Or either your wife hates me, even though she has never met me.