I know this isn't perfect but I was in a little bit of a hurry. It's written in response to a liberal twit who had a (admittedly clever) multiple choice test for the presidency. It was liberal nonsense, so the local representative of the ORP (Ohio Republican Party) asked me to write a response to it. The carrot for my writing (I've done one other, and will probably do more before the election) is a Bush t-shirt (I'm cheap).

Anyway, here's the editorial:

This is written in response to a piece written by Lynn Last (published 8/3). I'd have to say it's one of the most creative and humorous pieces I've seen. I thought I'd write my own multiple choice test. With mixed messages and candidates that seem to agree with each other at times, it can be confusing. Hopefully this will clear some of it up. In fact, it'll be real easy - each question will have only two options.

1) I choose who to vote for based on: a) their ability to be a competent leader; b) their ability to win in a game of Scrabble

2) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that: a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership; b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

3) War in Iraq is clearly another important issue. My president would: a) support war in Iraq, and do what it takes to get the job done; b) support war in Iraq, but vote against funding the war

4) The economy is currently in a strong recovery, but more should be done. A good President would: a) cut taxes across the board and provide other incentives for business growth; b) raise taxes on those that create jobs, while increasing handouts and government spending

5) Education is always an important issue. Regarding the No Child Left Behind Act, I would like a President to: a) support it, sign it, promote it; b) vote for it, call it "groundbreaking," and then attack it

6) Gas prices are getting higher all the time. The best way to remedy this is to: a) stabilize the Middle East, starting with a more stable Iraq; b) support raising the gas tax by an incredible fifty cents per gallon

And finally, the real question of the next election:

7) The war on terror should be fought: a) on the streets of Baghdad and in the mountains of Afghanistan; b) on the streets of New York

Edit to say thanks to CavVet for the streets of Baghdad/streets of New York thing - I got permission a while back to use it.

Edit to change formatting.

DoubleFeed: I go to the grocery store to the freezer section just to leer at nipples.

Originally Posted By Sniper_Wolfe:I know this isn't perfect but I was in a little bit of a hurry. It's written in response to a liberal twit who had a (admittedly clever) multiple choice test for the presidency. It was liberal nonsense, so the local representative of the ORP (Ohio Republican Party) asked me to write a response to it. The carrot for my writing (I've done one other, and will probably do more before the election) is a Bush t-shirt (I'm cheap).

Anyway, here's the editorial:

This is written in response to a piece written by Lynn Last (published 8/3). I'd have to say it's one of the most creative and humorous pieces I've seen. I thought I'd write my own multiple choice test. With mixed messages and candidates that seem to agree with each other at times, it can be confusing. Hopefully this will clear some of it up. In fact, it'll be real easy - each question will have only two options.

1) I choose who to vote for based on:

a) their ability to be a competent leader; b) their ability to win in a game of Scrabble

2) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership; b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

3) War in Iraq is clearly another important issue. My president would:

a) support war in Iraq, and do what it takes to get the job done; b) support war in Iraq, but vote against funding the war

4) The economy is currently in a strong recovery, but more should be done. A good President would:

a) cut taxes across the board and provide other incentives for business growth; b) raise taxes on those that create jobs, while increasing handouts and government spending

5) Education is always an important issue. Regarding the No Child Left Behind Act, I would like a President to:

a) support it, sign it, promote it; b) vote for it, call it "groundbreaking," and then attack it

6) Gas prices are getting higher all the time. The best way to remedy this is to:

a) stabilize the Middle East, starting with a more stable Iraq; b) support raising the gas tax by an incredible fifty cents per gallon

And finally, the real question of the next election:

7) The war on terror should be fought: a) on the streets of Baghdad and in the mountains of Afghanistan; b) on the streets of New York

Edit to say thanks to CavVet for the streets of Baghdad/streets of New York thing - I got permission a while back to use it.

Is that what you meant?

Snipey, you are gonna be great one day.

In most sports you only need one ball. In my sport you need both.NRA,GOA,SAF.

Originally Posted By Sniper_Wolfe:I know this isn't perfect but I was in a little bit of a hurry. It's written in response to a liberal twit who had a (admittedly clever) multiple choice test for the presidency. It was liberal nonsense, so the local representative of the ORP (Ohio Republican Party) asked me to write a response to it. The carrot for my writing (I've done one other, and will probably do more before the election) is a Bush t-shirt (I'm cheap).

Anyway, here's the editorial:

This is written in response to a piece written by Lynn Last (published 8/3). I'd have to say it's one of the most creative and humorous pieces I've seen. I thought I'd write my own multiple choice test. With mixed messages and candidates that seem to agree with each other at times, it can be confusing. Hopefully this will clear some of it up. In fact, it'll be real easy - each question will have only two options.

1) I choose who to vote for based on:

a) their ability to be a competent leader; b) their ability to win in a game of Scrabble

2) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership; b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

3) War in Iraq is clearly another important issue. My president would:

a) support war in Iraq, and do what it takes to get the job done; b) support war in Iraq, but vote against funding the war

4) The economy is currently in a strong recovery, but more should be done. A good President would:

a) cut taxes across the board and provide other incentives for business growth; b) raise taxes on those that create jobs, while increasing handouts and government spending

5) Education is always an important issue. Regarding the No Child Left Behind Act, I would like a President to:

a) support it, sign it, promote it; b) vote for it, call it "groundbreaking," and then attack it

6) Gas prices are getting higher all the time. The best way to remedy this is to:

a) stabilize the Middle East, starting with a more stable Iraq; b) support raising the gas tax by an incredible fifty cents per gallon

And finally, the real question of the next election:

7) The war on terror should be fought: a) on the streets of Baghdad and in the mountains of Afghanistan; b) on the streets of New York

Edit to say thanks to CavVet for the streets of Baghdad/streets of New York thing - I got permission a while back to use it.

Is that what you meant?

Snipey, you are gonna be great one day.

Yeah that's what they mean.

I changed the original post. Glad you like the editorial.

DoubleFeed: I go to the grocery store to the freezer section just to leer at nipples.

I worked for several years as a writer at a software company working on boring technical documentation. Hope you don't mind the following edit; I cut a lot of words but still kept the basic meaning:

/////////////////////////////////////////////////(__<ARTICLE TITLE>__, 8/3) by Lynn Last was one of the funniest pieces I've ever seen. In response, please consider the following, alternative, multiple choice test:

1) I choose who to vote for based on:

a) their ability to be a competent leader;b) their ability to win in a game of Scrabble

2) War in Iraq is clearly another important issue. My president would:

a) support war in Iraq, and do what it takes to get the job done;b) support war in Iraq, but vote against funding the war

3) The economy is currently in a strong recovery, but more should be done. A good President would:

a) cut taxes across the board and provide other incentives for business growth;b) raise taxes on those that create jobs, while increasing handouts and government spending

4) Education is always an important issue. Regarding the No Child Left Behind Act, I would like a President to:

a) support it, sign it, promote it;b) vote for it, call it "groundbreaking," and then attack it

5) Gas prices are getting higher all the time. The best way to remedy this is to:

a) stabilize the Middle East, starting with a more stable Iraq;b) support raising the gas tax by an incredible fifty cents per gallon

6) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership;b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

And finally, the real question of the next election:

7) The war on terror should be fought: a) on the streets of Baghdad and in the mountains of Afghanistan; b) on the streets of New York/////////////////////////////////////////////////

The 2nd amendment stuff in the beginning shows your hand too early for this audience (ma and pa America), so I moved it towards the end.

Originally Posted By wifeofgunnut:Very good IMHO. Would you consider changing the "it" in the following sentence to a "that?"

Hopefully this will clear some of it up.

Not sure what you're talking about. The second sentence of the introduction? I suppose I could change it to "that it is," but changing it to "that's" doesn't seem to have much of a point.

This is the second time in this thread I've misunderstood advice. Maybe something is wrong with me.

I was talking about the sentence "Hopefully this will clear some of it up." In the introduction. I don't know why, but when I read it the "it" in that sentence just didn't sound right. Just a suggestion, but I am not an expert. "That" just sounded better than "it". "That's" or "that it is" would be silly though.

Originally Posted By wifeofgunnut:Very good IMHO. Would you consider changing the "it" in the following sentence to a "that?"

Hopefully this will clear some of it up.

Not sure what you're talking about. The second sentence of the introduction? I suppose I could change it to "that it is," but changing it to "that's" doesn't seem to have much of a point.

This is the second time in this thread I've misunderstood advice. Maybe something is wrong with me.

I was talking about the sentence "Hopefully this will clear some of it up." In the introduction. I don't know why, but when I read it the "it" in that sentence just didn't sound right. Just a suggestion, but I am not an expert. "That" just sounded better than "it". "That's" or "that it is" would be silly though.

Thanks for the advice. To me, 'it' sounds better.

Does anyone else have a preference?

DoubleFeed: I go to the grocery store to the freezer section just to leer at nipples.

Originally Posted By WolfAR15:Absolutely splendid work my boy!. Tell me how did you vome to be so closely connected with the republican office?

Volunteer and go to meetings. I live in a liberal county so they're more than happy to have me. Usually just meeting one person led to another...I went to a meeting of people volunteering to help GWB out, from there my 'boss' invited me to some other meetings. Other candidates needed help so now I really do more for Jimmy Stewart (state rep incumbent) than anyone else (lots of parades - leaving for one in thirty minutes). For Bush my work is pretty much relegated to lit drops and phone banking. Voter ID/registration will commence one students are back in town.

DoubleFeed: I go to the grocery store to the freezer section just to leer at nipples.

THANK YOU and good job getting off of your ass and standing up for gun rights. Would 1% of gun owners do the same, we wouldn't be in the shitstorm that we're in.

And onto...Well if all the other copywriters are going to jump in, I might as well...

From this:6) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership;b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

To this:6) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor and supports ownership of firearms by responsible citizens;b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, votes to restrict the rights of law-abiding gun owners and demonstrates poor gun safety while posing with a shotgun

Why?- "responsible citizens", "law-abiding citizens" good buzz words.- The phrase "little restriction on firearms ownership" is scary to many without clarification.- contrasts the voting records of a and b.

THANK YOU and good job getting off of your ass and standing up for gun rights. Would 1% of gun owners do the same, we wouldn't be in the shitstorm that we're in.

And onto...Well if all the other copywriters are going to jump in, I might as well...

From this:6) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor, and favors little restriction on firearms ownership;b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, has an "F" rating from the NRA, and poses with a shotgun while demonstrating poor gun safety

To this:6) The question of firearms in America is important to me. I want a president that:

a) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, signed a concealed carry bill as governor and supports ownership of firearms by responsible citizens;b) claims to support the 2nd Amendment, votes to restrict the rights of law-abiding gun owners and demonstrates poor gun safety while posing with a shotgun

Why?- "responsible citizens", "law-abiding citizens" good buzz words.- The phrase "little restriction on firearms ownership" is scary to many without clarification.- contrasts the voting records of a and b.

FWIW...

-Z

Hmm, I wish I would have thought of the "law-abiding citizens" thing before I sent it in. Thanks for the tip, I'll keep it in mind for next time.

DoubleFeed: I go to the grocery store to the freezer section just to leer at nipples.

Lynn Last, a native New Yorker, is a 26-year resident of Southeast Ohio. She lived on a farm in Vinton County for 10 years and in Athens for the past 16. She is a landlord, artist, and part-time assistant to her husband, Dr. Mark Rothstein, whose last name she occasionally uses.

WTF mate?

ETA: I predict Sage WILL run for office. I guaranfuckintee it. Dude, its written all over you.

In most sports you only need one ball. In my sport you need both.NRA,GOA,SAF.