I am bent over to shave my right calf and I feel a pop and I am in excruciating pain. More pain than I have felt in quite a while.
I sank down onto my knees and tried to summon up the grit to stand, rinse my hair, put a towel on, and get dressed. That took a half hour of using every curse word that I have.

I knew immediately: I needed to go to the hospital. I am stubborn. I should have called a friend (see Emily...I admit that I was wrong) instead of going in a cab. I get to GW and go through triage and am brought back quickly.

But I wasn't impressed with the ER protocol. Give me drugs (that i already have at home) and send me on my way. T he attending ER doc was all like "trust me, this is what I do" to which I replied "So where did you do your ortho residency?"

I email my surgeon. I call his on-call Ortho resident. On-call just happens to work with my surgeon. I was admitted soon after. We did a contrast dye MRI to see what is going on. They gave me better meds (which explains the typos and why it has taken a few hours to write this [but I have now gone back and fixed some of the typos]) and have been coming by to check on me. The nurses here on 4north understand pain and that with some ortho injuries, time is of the essence.

Sadly, I missed Elbow. But my neighbor John checked in on Jack Cat and brought me Ted and Gatorade. I gave him the tickets and he had an amazing time. So not all was lost.

My Nihal even swung over to check-in on me right before visiting hours ended.

I will update once I get the radiology re report tomorrow. (Hopefully my surgeon will see me before I get discharged.)

So what do I need from you, my friends? Understanding more than anything. I want you to see me fighting for myself. I don't want you to think that I am giving in to my injuries.

Even if this turns out that I didn't herniate a disc, I made the right decision to come. Pain is an important signal to the brain that something isn't as it should be.

[UPDATE: resident came in the morning and he said it wasn't a herniation. Occupational therapist said it was a mild herniation at L3-L4. I wish they would just give me a copy of the radiology report. But i will be discharged sometime today.]

@TL -- it took a while but when i got the help that I deserved things got much better.

@Natalie -- it took me almost a decade to get my diagnosis. One egotistical ER doctor wasn't going to get in my way from getting the care that i knew I not only deserved but also needed. Pain meds and steroids just mask what is going on with my back. I'm much more of a danger to myself in that state.

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About Robby

I'm 37 and have been overweight or obese since I was 8 years old. This is my journey to change not only my body but my relationship with it. And who knows, I might even meet some people on their own journeys along the way. To contact me privately, email me at FatGirlvsWorld@gmail.com