Well, that settles that. Tito, you have fooled us for the last time. Just as E! banned Speidi, CagePotato will now enact a news ban on Tito Ortiz until he actually does something newsworthy. Seriously. Even if it’s the slowest of slow news days, and the only story going around is that Tito is "very close" to signing a deal with DREAM to participate in their "Super Douchebag Tournament," we won’t cover it until it actually happens. That’s our promise to you.

I know what you’re thinking: That’s just too much sexyness for me to handle; I must turn off my computer for a while and walk around the block until my head clears. And Fabio knows you’re thinking that too, and he’s cool with it.

Apparently, the above image was shot during an infomercial-taping for Fabio’s Healthy Planet Protein System, and since we just came into the possession of some very cool prizes, we’re using it as the basis of a caption contest this week.

Please submit your captions to the above picture in the comments section below by noon ET on Friday. The best one will get the book, the second best one will get the shirt, and any other runners-up that we deem worthy will get the Hall of Fame. Cool? Well, get goin’.