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Wednesday, 21 October 2015

Make Your Relationship Work Jhorr!

It's Wednesday! I want to talk about love and relationships. I don't play with matters of the heart. Permit me if I sound a little touchy.

Making Changes in a Relationship

Gone are the days when people mended things. We live in a disposable world right now. When it stops working, you throw it away. When you feel it's no longer useful, you show it to the door. "Aint nobody got time for that", some say.

This attitude has carried over into our approach towards relationships. When he tells one joke you don't like, you're no longer interested. You thought you really liked her, but you have had with her and, you're done. Off you go.

If one more person tells me "I cannot stress myself because I'm in a relationship," I am going to scream like a lion. Oh no, lions don't scream. What will I do? Erm . . . I will still scream.

Like seriously, if we want a good solid relationship; we have to work towards it. A good relationship requires work and work and more work. One of the reasons divorce rate is so high is because so many of us are reluctant to COMMUNICATE our needs and feelings, while others are not even MAKING EFFORT TO CHANGE.

I'm here to help. :)

Maybe you've found yourself in a relationship you thought had possibilities, but you're starting to have doubts. Maybe you've got issues in your relationship, and you're thinking, "Will it work?" "Will it not work?"

Here's what you should do:

Take some time and work out what is really bothering you. Put a name to it. You can't expect things to change if you don't know what you want/need to be different.

When you've worked out what the issues are, decide which aspects of the problem you need to take ownership of. It is never just one person's fault.

The problem could stem from your reaction to the situation rather than the situation itself. See if you can change the power the person's action are having over you. Is whatever they are doing really worth getting upset about?

Be honest with yourself to see if these problems are real or if you're magnifying them to give to yourself an excuse to end the relationship.

After you've done all the above and have come to understand the problem, it is now time to talk with your partner. Make sure you have a heart-to-heart conversation with your partner. Don't go and turn it into a speech. Make it a dialogue. You hear?

I always want to KISS - Keep It Short and Simple. So we'll continue next week with how to go about a heart-to-heart conversation.

Meanwhile, keep this:

"A relationship is like a shark, it needs to keep moving forward to stay alive."~ Woody Allen