How to get the Perf Beach Bod on a Sloth’s Diet

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Sloths are a majestic species, they are healthy and more active than we realize. Inhabiting the rain forests of Central and South America, sloths are slow yet active in their own way. Moving at the speed of molasses, sloths climb trees, swim on occasion, and take hella naps. Here’s how we will get the hot bod of our dreams by climbing a few trees and napping in between:

Tip 1: Eat While Laying Down

Photo courtesy of animalisttoo.com

Buy a ton of carrots, slice them up, place them in a bowl and proceed to lay on the ground while you eat them. Sloths lay down when they eat and they seem to stay in shape just fine. All the chewing from the carrots will allow you to burn maybe 12 calories. Good job.

Tip 2: Take a Snooze

Photo courtesy of slothsanctuary.com

Sleep. Running a mile burns calories, sure…but so does sleeping. A sloth sleeps a majority of its life, sowhy shouldn’t you? An averaged sized human will burn about 50-60 calories sleeping.

Tip 3: Crunch on Some Salad

Photo courtesy of slothsanctuary.com

Vary your dieting foods. A bradypus sloth (three-toed sloth) eats 96 different varieties of leaves, which means it doesn’t usually spend more than 2.2 days on the same tree because he eats all the leaves in sight. Better find a leafy tree now before the sloths take all the good ones.

Tip 4: Say “Cheese”

Photo courtesy of friendsoftherainforest.org

Smile. Okay so this may not have anything to do with losing weight, however, smiling consistently reduces facial wrinkles. Sloths have big smiles and so should you. Also, you want to start wrinkle prevention now while you’re young, it’s never too early for that.

Tip 5: Always Have Milk

Photo courtesy of animalisttoo.com

Drink milk to get strong bones. Sloths follow this advice ritually. Granted, they are drinking goat’s milk, but you can drink soy milk, cow’s milk, or almond milk. Calcium is good for your bones and is an overall good choice in beverage when you’reon a diet.

Too bad sloths don’t live in our very own backyards, having them around just might be the motivation we need to get fit. Furry and slow, sloths hold the key to success when executing a successful diet. Lots of greens, veggies, milk, sleep, smiles, and slow digestion is what keeps these creatures in tip top shape. Sloth’s diet, more successful than Jared was at Subway? I think yes.