As we revealed last week, for the photo shoot on a SPORTS ILLUSTRATED article, we’ll all be treated to one of the choicest dimepieces the world’s ever seen. Also, next to her will be Ron Artest, who we’re told plays the “basket’s ball.” Never heard of him, really, and haven’t we already talked about him enough? Yes, we have, and let’s talk about Natalin Avci instead.

(Ho. Lee. S**t.)

Natalin, as you’ve probably deduced, is the friendly young lady seated next to Artest (how’s that even pronounced? Like “artist,” or with the accent on the second syllable? Seriously, never heard of this guy ever).