Is it ok to cry during an interview?

After a long dry spell, I had an interview for a job I really would have liked. I did my prep work, practiced what I was going to say, which stories to tell and which ones NOT to tell. And then I got hit with two questions that dumbfounded me. I had no idea what to say. Needless to say this threw me off my game, then I had a case of the Ummmmmms. I tried to make a joke out of it, but to no avail. I didn't actually cry, but I think I may have looked like it. The one woman actually told me to breathe, cause I was turning red. Do you think I still have a chance?

Well unless it was a for an acting job (or economic development ), I would say that crying would not be a good way to get the job.

The advice you got from the interviewer was actually pretty good. I would add that if you don't know the answer, say so, it is very easy to spot someone who is trying to bs their way through. Relax, be yourself, and keep in the back of your mind that the interviewers are just people too. Although, they are people that can affect your future, so don't get too chummy!

To get better with the interview process, I suggest you got for jobs you don't really care about getting just to practice your interview skills. Of course you want to show that getting the job is very important to you for a job you actually want, but don't be in the frame of mind that your very life hinges on getting it. You'll be able to think more clearly.

If you get hit with a question you can't answer, be honest about it. Take your time and say that I've never had that experience or whatever and then try to redirect the question/answer to something that you're more familiar with. It's okay to not know the answer sometimes. People can't expect you to know everything. Those questions could have been a test to see how well you respond under pressure. I can think of countless presentations to the planning commission, advisory committees, general public, etc. where I've been asked at least one question or given a comment that I couldn't really respond to. It happens to the best of us. You just have to learn how to gain control of the situation without losing your composure.

I read an article the other day about how women cry too much at work, and it can really hurt your career. I have now cried twice at work in a year (once during a really bad evaluation, the other when I got diagnosed with a disease over the phone). I am trying to prevent this from happening again, but I'm kind of an emotional person- some people are just criers! I think its best if your employer discovers this after he hires you, however. A good way to prevent tears is to press your tongue to the roof of your mouth- it really helps!

You know, it may not officially be "okay" to cry during an interview, but look, we are all just human beings here trying to do our best, you were under pressure, and you clearly must have really wanted this position to feel so invested in a successful outcome that you nearly cried. Interviews are about the most unnatural social situation there is and it's easy to psyche yourself out.

Were I interviewing a candidate for a position, I would not hold it against them were this to happen as long as it were clear that the candidate possessed the other worthwhile qualities that I'd be looking for.

I'm guessing they now assume you don't function well under pressure, and you should probably start looking for a different job elsewhere. Believe me, a better job could more than likely come along. And now you've gotten that out of your system, and you know what to improve on.

I would say that it depends on the type of position you're interviewing for.

That being said, if I was interviewing someone for a planning position which would require dealing with citizens and developers, and this person cried at the interview, I wouldn't even consider them.

If you can't hold up under pressure during an interview, how are you going to react when John Q. Citizen calls you a commie dictator and threatens to sue you? Or a developer tells you you're incompetent and just drying to squeeze all the money out of him you can?

Interviews are tough. Often you have four people staring at you, grilling you and judging you. The advice about admitting you don't know the answer is good. I've done that and I still got the job.

I agree. I had a question when I was interviewed for my current job - something about what sort of company culture am I most comfortable in, and I didn't know how to answer because I've never worked for this type of company before, plus I'd only recently arrived in Canada and wasn't sure if things might be a bit different over here. I asked the guy to explain a bit more about what he meant by culture, which he did, and then he laughed and said something about how well I turned the question around and used it to get info from him.

I don't think it's okay to cry in an interview. Sure it's one of the most nerve-wracking experiences, but as btrage pointed out, the interviewers won't know whether this is out of character for you, or a regular occurrence!

It's hard not to be nervous but it's important to remember that an interview is a two-way process: you're also there to find out if it's a good fit for you. You wouldn't have been asked to the interview if you didn't have some valuable skills and/or experience that are of interest to the employer, so have confidence in yourself and use the opportunity to ask them a few questions. This approach has helped me be less nervous.

Add me to the list of people who would hesitate to hire somebody who cried at an interview. I am assessing the potential employee's reactions to pressure situations, because as planners, we are often put into a difficult place by the public. If somebody were to attack a planner or his/her work, your first response to try to laugh it off would be a good one. Of course, you have to follow it up by looking relaxed and not acting flustered.

I am occassionally an examiner for a certification exam that includes an interview. It is amazing to see how many of the people - who are required to have several years of experience to sit for the exam - are visibly nervous. There really is no reason. There are two things you need to do:

1) Be confident in what you know. You really do know what you know you know. And you also know when you do not know. Answer questions with confidence and share an example from your past where you have dealt with the issue in the question. If you do not know, then start by admitting that you have not had experience with that, then then follow up with something like "I would have to check, but it seems similar to..., in which case...," or "I would start by looking at the state statute and also research how other communities are dealing with...."

2) Go into the interview with the thought that you do not NEED the job and that you are as likely to decline it as to accept it if it is offered to you. We get nervous and flustered when we put too much emphasis onto things like job interviews. Relax. You really should be checking them out as much as they are checking you out, which makes it an even playing field. Two of the last three jobs I got were ones I was not sure I wanted, and I am sure it showed in the interview. In one case, my hesitation was one of the factors that made them want me even more.