How you can help

Experiments are currently underway to establish which portions of the sound are the ones which alleviate the symptoms of telomeric shortening. As part of this, Nothing Machine Therapy Recordings (NMTR) have been created using noises captured from the Nothing Machine and arranged for maximum effect. These Therapy Recordings allow the Technicians to spend periods time away from the Nothing Machine without a return of symptoms.

To fund further research increasing the effectiveness of the recordings and to reduce the financial plight of the Technicians, they have decided to set up a fund to enable public donations and, as a reward for donation, make these recordings available to the public.

Nothing Machine Therapy Recording v1

CDRs of NMTR v1 can now be purchased for a donation of £6 (inc worldwide P+P)

Price Including Postage

Price Including Postage

NMTR v1 also can be downloadedfor a donation of £4 from

An Overview

The Nothing Machine is a remnant of the British Z+ Pinch Inertial Energy Program. A project designed to probe further the boundaries of Nuclear Fusion Technology in the hope of finding a solution to the world's future energy problems.

The experiments ran for six months before curious side-effects surrounding the Z+ Machine could be successfully quantified. After a rigorous investigation was launched by Research Councils UK (RCUK) which discovered that the experimentation had effectively torn a 2m spherical hole in space/time which ‘relaxed’ out to a three square mile vicinity due to the elastic nature of reality when the Z+ machine was turned off. The Z+ Machine was then reconfigured to create a Nothing Containment Field (NCF) and ‘suck’ back in these dispersed gaps to return the Reality Density (RD) of the surrounding area to that measured previously.

Because of its creation and stabilisation of what amounts to a pure nothing, the reconfigured Z+ Machine has been christened ‘The Nothing Machine’ by the remaining attendant Technicians.

During the early experimentation phase of the Z+ Machines operation, various unexpected and unexplainable side effects occurred to the small number of permanent Technicians who were spending the most time around the reactor. These side effects varied in severity, the worst being varying degrees of telomeric shortening which brings about the symptoms of premature aging at the cellular level. The audio frequencies drawn in by the NCF have been shown to put the condition into remission and are now being recorded, edited and refined to produce Nothing Machine Therapy Recordings which allow the Technicians to spend time away from the Machine without the symptoms returning too heavily in the medium term.

Latest News

2013 was a busy year for the Nothing Machine Technicians. It started when some worrying data emerged from experimentation at the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) at CERN near Geneva. These readings echoed some of the anomalies that were seen in the data just before our disastrous Z+ Pinch Inertial Energy event in 2011. As a result, the Nothing Machine Technicians were asked to consult with the LHC Safety Assessment Group (LSAG) in Geneva to look at ways to avoid a similar catastrophe befalling their machine and put steps in place to contain it if the worst happened.

On arrival in Geneva, the Technicians found the same anecdotal stories of time-drift and audio hallucinations which were dismissed during the Z+ Pinch Inertial Energy Research. They immediately put an emergency plan into action, averting a larger scale disaster by setting up a dispersing version of the Nothing Containment Field (NCF) at the very centre of the 27km Collider ring to prevent the reality density peaking up to the catastrophic failure witnessed in their own experiment. Unfortunately this meant spending increasing amounts of time away from the Nothing Containment Field back in the UK which was reducing most of the symptoms of their telomeric shortening to manageable levels. It was found that the off-setting effects of the Nothing Machine Therapy Recording (NMTR v.1) were reduced as the year progressed which led to a serious deterioration in the health of the Technicians by the time they'd finished their consultation at CERN. Having now worked on a second Containment Field similar to the one in the UK, it was discovered that the signature energies of the field were completely different and that the CERN NCF had no measurable effect on recovering the health of the Nothing Technicians

It is now believed that the Technicians are ‘tied in’ on a sub-molecular level with the only UK Nothing Containment Field, moreover, as the NCF’s signature energy is slowly changing in time, the effectiveness of the Nothing Machine Therapy Recordings reduces, as they reflect a snapshot of the energy at a certain point in a constantly evolving energy map.