True Blood Seasons: Worst to First

If you love government, especially the Vampire Authority, you must have loved Season 5. Tara became a vampire thanks to Sire Pam and Russell Eddington was finally put to rest by Eric. Sookie had a dalliance with Alcide and Terry... WTF was Terry doing? He was in his own world of PTSD with supernatural forces. The season was all over the board and kind of a mess.

Sarah Newlin took up with the Governor in an attempt to eradicate vampires. Eric created a new vamp in the Gov's daughter. Billith eased out of the picture and Warlow blew in, then out. Terry got even more depressed than he was for five seasons and arranged to die; which he did. Tara and Pam got closer making them interesting to watch. Eric fled and burned up all nekkid like in the sunny snow. Well, it does lead us up to the final season.

Russell Eddington ruled as a sarcastic villain who could be deadly. Bill and Sookie broke up before we really began to care about them. Tara generally annoyed. Werewolves were a big thing and Alcide was hot. Season 3 was middle of the road fun in this ride.

Sookie lost a year in faerie land and Eric got amnesia, two things that brought them together as a romantic couple. That might seem odd, but it worked as they were hot hot hot. Marnie was a horrible evil, but her arc brought our heroes together in the end. It was a season of dreams; Jessica & Jason, Sookie and her threesome come to mind quickly. As campy as it was, characters seemed to deepen, such as Jessica. Sam met his birth family. Tara was killed in the finale. Season 4 was scattered, but worth it because of the steamy, sexy qualities.

Everything was new. We were just meeting the characters and even the slightest provocation made us hungry for more. The season focused more on humans and their reactions to the new world of vampires as part of society while giving us glimpses into the vampire world, its order and mythology.

Bill faced the fact he wasn't human anymore, we met Queen Sophie-Anne and the Cleopatra life she lead, Jason joined the Fellowship of the Sun and Eric forced Sookie to drink his blood, drawing them together in dreams and in real life when his maker, Godric made the ultimate sacrifice. Even Maryann couldn't kill the momentum. Season 2 encompassed the best of everything, which is why it leads the pack.

I don't know what it is about me that makes people think I want to hear their problems. Maybe I smile too much. Maybe I wear too much pink. But please remember I can rip your throat out if I need to. And also know that I am not a hooker. That was a long, long time ago