BOFFIN (n)
ISN'T: the thing you got caught doing in high school in the back seat of your car
IS: a scientific expert, especially one involved in technological research, who was probably working on a science project in the high school lab while you were doing that thing in the back seat of your car.

FILCH (v)
ISN'T: felch (no link; if you don't know what it is, trust me, you don't want to know)
IS: to steal furtively or casually

BINDLESTIFF (n)
ISN'T: an erection
IS: a hobo who carries his belongings in a bundle, often at the end of an erect stick.

QUINCUNX (n)
ISN'T: the arrangement of 483 folds of skin, protrusions and crevices otherwise known as the vagina.
IS: An arrangement of five things in a square or rectangle with one at each corner and one in the middle.

PIEBALD (adj)
ISN'T: an absence of pubic hair on a woman
IS: composed of incongruous parts or different colors

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