Love in This Time of Chaos

Today, my husband and I woke up in the dark, much before sunrise. It was early morning, the sound from the baby monitor loud and clear for waking both of us up. We smiled through our sleepy eyes. I would have loved to sleep in, but wouldn’t miss this time with the kids, before the morning rush kicks in, for anything in the world. His smile said he wouldn’t miss it either and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Today, I had a pre-schooler shouting from the bathroom for more toilet paper, and a toddler tucking at my jeans. My husband was rushing out the door to catch the morning bus to work. He turned around to look at me, and waved a goodbye with a slight movement with his wrist, clutching his phone. In that moment of chaos, that wave meant more than a kiss, and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Today, the kids slept after a hard evening filled with tantrums, dinner, bath, tears, stories and hugs. When the house was quiet, my husband and I could finally acknowledge each other after the whole day. We had time to look at each other, and even finish a conversation. Instead, we lazily raised our eyebrows, nodded our heads and exchanged some “Hmm”, and that was enough. We both needed our time and we both were comfortable in each other’s silence, and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Today, I coughed every now and then. I probably didn’t even realize it as I was busy taking care of a sick child myself. My husband was dropping and picking the other kid up from swimming lessons, music classes, and even birthday parties. He had added another chore to his list of to-do things, and that was to pick up some cough medicine from the local pharmacy. As I found exactly what I needed on the kitchen table, without realizing that I even needed it, we exchanged glances and my eyes twinkled. He knew that that was my “thank you”, and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Today, my little girl spoke to her grandmother over the phone. She updated her with all that was happening in the house and at day care. I was amazed to hear how she could carry on a conversation almost like an adult, and how much she took notice of all the things that were happening around her. As I turned to look at my husband, he looked at me in the exact same moment. We smiled and silently exchanged our mutual feeling of pride for our not-so-little one. He did not let her see him smile as we didn’t want to make her conscious, and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Today, we fought over a petty issue. We disagreed, raised our voices, and walked away in opposite directions. We had little ones to be tended to, food to be cooked, a unicorn hat to be bought, bins to be emptied, laundry to be folded, songs to be sung, stories to be read, so much to be heard, and so many curious questions to be answered. And we did just that, without letting any of the arguments come in the way. We separated “family” from “us” and worked as a team, and for that reason, I fell in love, just like every day.

Tomorrow will be another day, better or worse, que sera sera. But, I can’t wait to get up, face the chaos, and fall head over heels in love once again.