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The Cresset, a journal of commentary on literature, the arts, and public affairs, explores ideas and trends in contemporary culture from a perspective grounded in the Lutheran tradition of scholarship, freedom, and faith while informed by the wisdom of the broader Christian community.

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In space, the hearts of astronauts become rounder. According
to the scientists who have studied this phenomenon, the hearts of those who
spend long periods of time in space were transformed into a shape that averaged
nearly 10 percent more spherical after six months.

2

In
Minnesota recently, the hearts of moose have often faltered too soon, causing
the moose to suffer a cluster of early mortality so profound that they have
been wired and followed from a distance by veterinarians. When interviewed,
one of the vets explained that when a moose heart stops beating, it sends a
text message to their phones that says, “I’m dead at x and y coordinates,”
directing them quickly to the downed animal so they have a better chance to
decipher the clumsy heart.

3

My sister, who has examined the human heart in the
commonplace of gravity, has prepared herself for surgery on her own faulty
heart. The doctor is a friend, the anesthetist a colleague. A volunteer for
study, my sister has already been monitored a dozen ways, details of her heart
and the outcomes of her surgery to become averages or anomalies.

4

One
afternoon during eighth grade, I stood with my classmates around the cow’s
heart that Miss Hutchings unwrapped on her desk. Inside and out, she said, we
need to know ourselves, and she halved that heart to show us auricles,
ventricles, valves, the wall well-built or else. Her fingers found where
arteries begin. She pressed the ends of veins. She said we were learning the
circulatory system the proper way, observing firsthand.

5

The cow’s heart Miss Hutchings displayed looked nothing like
the ones that had been suggested on Valentine’s Day, during cartoons, and in
art classes beginning in first grade with Mrs. McIntyre, who had us draw a
sweeping arc from near the top of our red, folded construction paper down to
the very bottom. “Now cut, children,” she said, “very carefully along that line
and then unfold.” And though some of them were V-shaped and others looked more
like balls, in a minute all of us had the suggestion of a bright red heart upon
which to write “I love you” and carry home to our mothers.

6

Previous studies have shown that astronauts are exposed to a
range of health issues when taking prolonged trips into space, including losses
in bone density and muscle mass and vision anomalies, but now it’s been shown
that there is more to be concerned about than those problems. The rounder the
heart becomes, the weaker it gets. A rounded heart is a heart at risk.

7

Once, riding in her car while I was visiting Maine, I
listened to my host tell a story about hitting a moose on the stretch of
highway we were traveling. A family had pulled up behind her on the shoulder,
the father asking, “You got a use for that moose?” I smiled, thinking that was
the punch line, but there was more. A moment later she described the haunch of
moose she’d bartered from that family. “That moose was all mine, by rights,”
she said, “but the father dressed it out, so it was a fair trade.” Even though
it was raining heavily, she accelerated, our speed feeling like an exclamation
point, the air inside the car so rich with story. Because I love to eat organ
meat, I asked her whether she’d received part of the heart and liver. “Not the
heart,” she said. “Not that.”

8

And last week, in Pennsylvania, when my vocabulary for
encouragement stumbled and stalled, I offered my sister the weak consolation of
listening to her analyze the pros and cons of heart surgery. The muscle, she
said, can regain what’s been lost. Just in case, I’ve updated my will. Three hours,
on average, this operation takes, she went on, though by then I was fixed on
the sort of planning that included a will revision, the summary she provided
about how post-operative rehab is organized failing to adhere to the moist
walls of my memory.

9

Both of us had listened for years to our father’s reports on
his aging heart. About the tempo at first, the pacemaker fresh under his skin
after he’d fainted at the wheel and drifted, through luck, into a field as
level as his crab-grassed lawn. Sixty, he’d say, counting the beats for a
minute as if he were in training. The first time he exposed its shape near his
shoulder I imagined his body penetrated by some circular alien who would,
inevitably, invade his blood.

10

After our class had inspected the cow’s heart, Miss Hutchings
unwrapped the hearts of chickens and turkeys, the hearts of swine and sheep.
She arranged them by size on the thick, brown paper sack, leaving a space, we
knew, for ours. Richard Turner, whose father’s heart had halted, examined his
hands. Anne Cole, whose father had revived to cut hair at the mall, stepped
back, turning away from the entry to the steer’s aorta, the four chambers we
were required to know.

11

A long-held belief of many traditional cultures and their
healers is that eating the organs from a healthy animal supports the organs of
the eater. For example, eating the brains of a healthy animal supports clear
thinking, and eating animal kidneys will cure people suffering from urinary
disease. That logic means that the best way of treating a person with a weak
heart is to feed the person the heart of a healthy animal. There are countless
reports about the success of these types of traditional practices. None of them
have been verified by scientific testing.

12

“Feel this,” my father said, guiding my hand to the simple
Braille of his new pacemaker. “Sixty,” he said, “over and over like a clock.” I
told him about the billion heartbeats of the mammal, how the shrew had three
years to live at 800 beats per minute, and the cat had twelve at 200. “We have
thirty years,” I said, “because we use up 100,000 beats per day, but we get
more because of science and medicine and help from how slowly we mature.” When
I told him this, my father was well over eighty, closing in on three billion,
and I was past two billion.

13

Some statistics I didn’t tell my father:

The human heart usually weighs about ten ounces, but the
heart of the blue whale often weighs about 1,300 pounds. It averages about
eight to ten beats per minute that can be heard two miles away. On the other
hand, the tiny hearts of hummingbirds are the largest proportionate to their
minuscule body weight. Their heart rate runs to over 1,000 beats per minute
when they’re active, but it slows when they sleep to less than 100—a necessity,
or they would starve to death before morning.

14

According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, the
average weight of a moose heart is three pounds. Trying to make things clearer,
a spokesman for the department claims, “It’s like holding a football.”

15

“The heart doesn’t work as hard in space, which can cause a
loss of muscle mass,” says the lead scientist for ultrasound at NASA and senior
author of the study of astronauts’ hearts. Though the astronauts’ hearts
returned to their normal, more oval shape, shortly after their return to Earth,
what’s left to learn is whether there are serious, long-term consequences,
something that can’t be known for years.

16

“You know these things when you teach in a medical school,”
my sister says. “I’ve known for quite some time my heart cannot heal itself.” She
talks as if I, too, have always known she’s had what she calls a “persistent
disability,” something “nagging, whose voice has gotten louder.” As if that
voice could carry hundreds of miles, revealing her heart’s distress. She says
the surgery is a choice that’s been made by her body. She is thin. Skeletal, I
think, and all I can think to say is, “It’s good you have the inside
information on your surgeon.”

“I’m thankful that I know these people,” she says. “I trust
them.”

17

I looked forward to the ritual of tiny candy hearts being
shared at the Valentine’s Day parties we had in grade school. Love You Much, it
said in blue letters on the pink candy. Be Mine was repeated in red letters on
pale blue hearts. From fourth to sixth grade, I looked at Susanna Frank or
Nancy Harris or Kathy McMichaels each time I swallowed one, sending sign
language their way.

18

The ultrasound pictures of the long-term-in-space astronauts’
hearts are stunning. The hearts look as if they’ve been molded like clay,
becoming so round they appear to be incapable of working. It doesn’t surprise
me to learn that astronauts often get lightheaded and faint upon standing when they
return to earth because of a sudden drop in blood pressure. I think of my
father, hospitalized at last, admitting he had, despite the pacemaker, fainted
twice when standing, the third time after bending to place his ball on a tee at
a public golf course. Despite my father’s protests, his friend had called an
ambulance. Within a week he underwent his second heart repair, this time triple
bypass surgery.

19

The day after we looked at animal hearts, Miss Hutchings
asked us to take our pulses. Using the stethoscopes she’d brought to class, we
listened to each other, boy to boy, girl to girl, because of the chance we’d
touch. The images of those butcher hearts faded while I dreamed of pressing my
ear to the rhythmic hearts of Sharon Rolfe and Janelle Fisher, whose breasts,
so far, had brushed me a few times while dancing. And then Miss Hutchings
recited the quart total of our blood, the distance it must travel, leaving and
returning. We learned all of the names for the routes it followed, ending with
capillaries so close to the surface I understood, though she didn’t say it, we
could nearly reach them with our lips and tongues, rushing the blood to each of
the sensitive sources for joy.

20

The sugar Valentine’s candy I loved in grade school are
called “conversation hearts” in the ads for them on the Internet. They come in
two sizes—small and large—but both kinds still feature the familiar messages
from my childhood: Marry Me, Sweet Talk, Darling, all of the speaking hearts in
pastel colors, three pounds for $15.76.

21

Now there are variations on that candy:
Heart-shaped Twizzlers
Heart-shaped lollipops
Heart-shaped sucker rings that fit on a finger
Heart-shaped candy strung into bracelets

A woman named Mercy Brown was once exhumed for public
autopsy. The people in the town in which she had lived believed that a local
cluster of consumption might be worsened by those who had died from that
disease, but it could be bettered by burning the uncorrupted heart of the
victim. Not only might there be an end to an epidemic, there was a chance,
people said, that her brother Edwin might be cured of his tuberculosis by
eating the ashes of her heart. Mercy’s father had to watch his daughter be
raised from the grave after being months buried. He had to endure the burning
of her heart. Edwin, at last, swallowed the ashes, but he died, regardless, in
two months, leaving his father to live alone and remember his daughter being
twice buried. This happened in Vermont in 1892. Mercy Brown was also thought by
many to be a vampire.

23

The rounding of the heart could mean trouble for people who
want to embark on long-term missions to Mars. Astronauts currently spend up to
six months at the orbiting International Space Station, which is staffed by
rotating crews. Missions to Mars would take about eighteen months and may offer
no return trip.

24

As if she wants me to be convinced her upcoming operation is
routine, my sister tells me our cousin has undergone his third operation, that
he has flown from Virginia to a Texas hospital for the latest surgery. So thin,
she says, his pants want to fall down, his shirts hang like curtains, reminding
me how, every late August, my mother held up what he’d outgrown, what I’d grow
into, dressing me for school and church for a year, two if we were lucky, teaching
the lesson of the threadbare, the ill-fitting and the out of style, learning
what was good enough. He’s still standing on his own two feet, my sister says,
wearing her hand-me-down language, adding he’s in our prayers and he’s a
fighter like a litany, like I should say amen or sing the Doxology before a
recessional hymn of hope. My sister, who learned to sew her own clothes, who
wore homemade, but new, who needed to perfect the careful cut and stitch
because she was older than every female cousin, declares, “Our time will come,”
like some minister for fatalism. She’s at the window of the spare room where
I’ve slept, saying the weather, so sunny and mild, is heavenly while I try to
ignore the sewing machine, the half-finished skirt and the thick file of
patterns collected in the good light I have to tear my eyes from.

25

Is it safe to eat a fresh raw moose heart?

Someone has already posted that question in an Internet forum
about large game animals. He received half a dozen responses:

“I wouldn’t. Chances are you will be just fine afterward, but
eating that heart raw isn’t very smart. As a rule of thumb you shouldn’t eat
anything raw from a game animal, especially an internal organ like the heart.”

“No, it’s not safe to eat the raw flesh of a moose or a deer
or any wild animal, you can get heartworm.”

“Apparently you forgot why we let large game animals hang
after we gut them and then let the carcass chill to near 32 degrees. It’s to
kill the intramuscular parasites.”

26

Now it is understood that in order to keep the heart healthy
in space, astronauts must know the amount and type of exercise they need to
perform to guarantee their safety on prolonged spaceflights. It’s been
suggested that exercise regimens developed for astronauts could also help people
on Earth who have physical limitations also maintain good heart health. Those
models could also give doctors a better understanding of common cardiovascular
conditions for ground-based patients.

27

During the last years of his life, as he approached ninety,
our father wore sweaters even in summer. So cold, so often, he kept the windows
shut in his un-air-conditioned house. He would probe for his pulse, reporting,
“Still there.” After that small, brief joke, he’d wait five minutes, sometimes
ten, before listening to his wrist again, head bowed, leaning forward, as if he
needed to coax a heartbeat with prayer.

28

When I attended my fiftieth high school class reunion
recently, there was a large poster that was labeled “In Memoriam.” It listed
those from my class who had died, a bit reminiscent of the Vietnam Memorial,
complete with a few small, impulse tributes of programs and table favors laid
beneath it. Sharon Rolfe and Janelle Fisher, I discovered, had each been dead
for more than twenty years. Except for our war dead, causes weren’t listed, but
like all the others, their hearts had stopped.

29

In the midst of writing this essay, I take a heart- age test
and learn my heart is a year younger than my age but I have a twenty-two
percent higher-than-average risk of problems in the next decade. I remind
myself that I’ve lowballed my answers, that this is a worst case scenario, but
there’s no denying my mother’s heart failure when she was younger than I am, my
father’s bypass and pacemaker, my sister’s impending open heart surgery.

30

A few answers to the raw moose heart question were more
condescending:

There is an Animal Planet TV show about humans getting animal
parasites. You stand a good chance of being their next guest star.

If you want to take the chance, it’s your body.

31

Everything points to a glass or two of red wine being
heart-helpful, but I drink only white wine and even then only rarely,
preferring beer. There is evidence that hearty laughter is good for the heart,
but I seldom laugh out loud. I blame it on my family history, all those dour
Germans drinking beer and frowning until they tumbled with heart attacks and
strokes.

32

There seems little question that eating organ meats has
fallen out of favor among people I know. I tell them that liver, kidney, and
heart are some of the most nutrient-rich foods you can eat, but there aren’t
any takers. At the grocery store, when I look for veal or lamb kidneys, there
are none, and when I settle for a package of chicken hearts, the clerk goes
“Eeew!” and acts as if she’ll pass it through without ringing it up just to
avoid touching it.

33

Even when, in the assisted living home, my father stopped
watching television, when he slept twelve hours a day and napped three times,
his fingers went to his wrist as he woke, repeating, “Still there.” Even when
he gave in to the wheelchair. Even when half his weight vanished although he
ate, like always, everything that was served. Even when his sentences turned
shorter, the ends lost like addresses, phone numbers, and the names of the
dead, his fingers returned to his wrist to read the braille for “still there,”
while I waited, despite reason, holding my breath for his up-to-the-minute
news.

34

Although raw moose heart is uniformly cautioned against,
there are several methods posted on the Internet for how to prepare moose heart
for cooking, most of the directions similar to this:

When the heart is still fresh, soak it in a bucket of cold
sea water or fresh water to flush out the blood. Rinse well. Trim the fat and
the tops of the valves off well so that the final product is mostly red and the
top is relatively level, with clear access to the chambers of the heart. At
this point, the heart can be kept in the freezer if wrapped well in Saran Wrap
and butcher paper, however it is best when eaten fresh.

This morning, the day of my sister’s surgery, a waitress spread
whipped cream into the shape of a thick, valentine heart across my son’s
banana-walnut pancakes. She did it carefully, making sure, she said, you know
it’s a heart and not a circle, so unashamed of her public sentiment, her heavy
body turned delicate in the sweetened air.

36

All this afternoon I regret the impossibility of omniscience.
And yet I am thankful. At last, from the nearby table, my phone sings its song
of incoming text. And though the news, this time, is good, in the altered
atmosphere, I believe our dependable, dangerous hearts are becoming spheres.

Gary Fincke is the Charles B. Degenstein Professor of English and Creative Writing and director of the Writers Institute at Susquehanna University.