I have a 10 year old daughter who is really keen to go to a vocational dance school and although I will support her in whatever she does, I am not convinced that she has the potential they are looking for. The bottom line is that in most areas I would say that she is almost, but not quite what they might consider suitable for intensive training. She is petite, with longish legs, for example, but her legs do not "go up to her armpits"; her technique is strong and she always achieves a distinction in exams, but not a 95% sort of distinction like some; she is reasonably flexible and can do the splits, for example, but is not super bendy. She has had quite a lot of success with auditions so far, but I wonder how much of this is based on being quite cute and quite a good little dancer in the here and now, rather than what might be achieved in the future.

Now, I know none of you have seen her and this is all very subjective, but does anyone have any thoughts about whether this is a realistic dream or not? Are the schools looking for absolute perfection, if that exists, in all aspects? Is someone who is quite good at everything preferable to someone who is brilliant in one area but a little lacking in another? What, in fact, are they looking for and how can they determoine the final potential in one so young?

I am new to this site and have been impressed by the honesty of some posts, so please don't feel shy to reply if your real thoughts are "not a chance" - I'll welcome any feedback!

Greetings, prettypointe, and welcome to CriticalDance! Thank you for your thoughtful post regarding your daughter. It is very clear that you support your daughter in her dream to become a dancer. Of course, as you say, we cannot advise because we cannot "see" her. But, it sounds as though she has some success with auditions and has done well with her exams. Just for the record, I am not an RAD instructor...you might call my background "international mix". A dancer need not be "super bendy" to become an accomplished dancer. In fact, sometimes extreme flexibility can present challenges for jumping and turning. Your daughter is only ten years old...She sounds like she has some talent and ability as well as a love of dancing. Perhaps, just support her in her love and enjoyment of dancing for the time being. This is what my parents did for me, and I will be eternally grateful. Whether she makes it to higher levels of professional dancing or not, she will learn so much about herself in the process that she will carry with her into her life as an adult. Her teachers will be able to help guide you both as time goes forward...

Many thanks for your reply, Gina Ness, and your wise words. I am quite happy to just let her continue as she is for the time being but she has to change schools next year and is quite determined to go the vocational route if possible. A Rhetorical question, perhaps, but do I let her audition (some school auditions are in as little as 9 months time!) and face possible dissapointment, or do I steer her in another direction? I remember this whole school choice thing being so difficult with her brother and he didn't have the added dimension of a speciality! Sadly, her teacher has no experience of students who aspire to any more than a weekly recreational class so, while she thinks she has potential, I'm not sure sure she sees it in the context of the bigger picture. Oh for a crsytal ball....

You should absolutely let her audition. That more than anything else will let you and her know if her ambition is realistic. Disappointment will be experienced eventually by all children, and it may be better earlier when they are still able to be comforted and led by their parents rather than later when they will be more likely to reject it.

Thank you. You are, of course, both right and I should let her audition. I'm sure that I will, in fact, as she wants this more than anything. I do know that dance is a good preparation for so many things in life, with all its ups and downs, and I'm sure my daughter will ultimately be happy with any outcome. Time will tell!

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