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"Make sure that what you are doing and striving for is going to be worth any sacrifices you will have to make along the way. If it's a relationship, job, anything in life."

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Tuesdays Tip: Just because you’re not scared doesn’t mean they aren’t

This past weekend Quinn came
downstairs both nights to get me because she was scared after she went to
sleep.I put her to bed at her
normal time and she brushed her teeth, we red some books and listened to
music.I laid her in bed and we
said some prayers and she turned to sleep.I went back down stairs and though I was set to watch a
movie with Hughey and she snuck down.Her little voice whispered “I’m Scared Daddy”.Back up I carried her and went in her room, I tucked her in
and asked why she was scared or what made her scared about her room.She told me there were scary noises and
I know her room is larger so I can see it happening.I told her to try sleeping one more time buy when I got to
the door I could tell she was getting up.I went into my room and when I got back she was by her door upset and
starting to cry.Her whimperjust melted my heart.As a parent if your child does
something they shouldn’t I can understand making them sit in their room, but
when they are scared you just can’t help but let them stay with you.

I remember when I was younger my
parents comforting me and how nice it was.Her room is bigger than mine so I know how scared she must
be.I told her she can crash in my
room and she was excited.She laid
down in my bed by the cat and got all catty.I told her she needed to sleep though and not to get all
excited because she does need to go back to her room.I don’t want her to think this is what she can do every
time.When I went to bed that
night I picked her up and put her in her bed just because I want to make sure
she knows she can sleep there and it is a safe room.That morning I woke to her next to me. Lol.Well she snuck back in!It was okay, I don’t mind because I
don’t see her that much.

The following night I asked her as
we were walking up the stairs if she felt scared and she said she didn’t.We red our books, listened to music,
and brushed our teeth.I was down
stairs with Hughey again just watching some TV and she came down again.My little munchie again was
scared.I took her back up and
talked to her but she was just to upset to hear it.I let her crash in bed again.This night I took her out and put her in her room later that
night.Later I heard her get up
and she walked to my room, I asked if she was okay and she answered “yea, I
just wanted to say bye”.Bye? Was
she going on a trip I didn’t know about?I hope she has her bags packed!I knew she couldn’t sleep so I asked her if she wanted to come stay next
to daddy.She let out an excited
yea and started to climb in.She
realized she forgot her bunny (stuffed animal that is) and ran to go get
it.I don’t mind her next to me
much, she does move a lot and kick me, (lol) but only seeing her as much as I
do I could care less.I know it’s
a phase they will grow out of but I still make sure she spends time in her room
at night because she needs to know it is a safe place.She enjoys playing in it during the day
so I know there is a part of her that loves it.

Sometimes I like to think she
just misses her Daddy…

So
for some tips I would urge you to let your child talk to you and tell you
what’s wrong if they can’t sleep.If they are scared then talk to them and try to comfort them.Always let them know you are listening
and not blowing them offIf a
child feels scared and then feels their parent isn’t listening or doesn’t care
this will only make them more scared and feel less comforted.Letting them stay in your bed is okay
from time to time but they also need to know that their bed is where they sleep
and Mommy and Daddy need to sleep too.Nothing will break your heart than when they cry out that they are
scared however.

Work
on just moving them back to their bed and as time goes on they will stay
there.Heck they may not come back
and you will miss the days when they crashed next to you.Enjoy them and always remember being
scared, and feeling fear especially in a child is different than us.We may not scar as easy but to them the
comfort of a nice bed that Daddy or Mommy use will put them at ease…

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