I'll start. I was at work. I worked as a customer service/teller supervisor of a retail bank. I was standing behind the teller line with my purse sitting on a chair while I was digging through my purse through my purse for something - and a condom wrapper flipped out of my bag and landed on the chair my purse was sitting on. There it was, just out in the open! I snatched it up and put it back in my purse and THEN looked up to see if anyone saw. Horrible.

1) Walked thru my office at work with my dress tucked up in my panty hose. I was not wearing panties. The 1st person to notice was the only guy in the office and he didn't tell me.
2) Went to a basketball game my daughter was cheering in with a pair of hot pink panties stuck to the back of my lime green sweatshirt. No one told me.
3) Most recent was at a night club. The girl dancing next to me was flailing her arms around and somehow she snagged one of my extensions out of my hair. It was stuck on her nail and she was trying to shake it off and trying to figure out what is was. Once it fell off her nail my SO hurried and kicked it under the stage. After the dance we could see her and her partner looking around the floor for it. We were laughing so hard.
4) One day I was walking out of a sports bar and my SO was behind me. He said there was an extension stuck on my butt and it looked like I had a tail.

But most recently I was crossing a street and slipped on a patch of ice in the crosswalk and fell. Tried to get up, slipped, and fell again. Two more attempts (with cars trying to make right turns and other people walking across with no problem) before I finally made it to my feet and finished crossing the street.

But most recently I was crossing a street and slipped on a patch of ice in the crosswalk and fell. Tried to get up, slipped, and fell again. Two more attempts (with cars trying to make right turns and other people walking across with no problem) before I finally made it to my feet and finished crossing the street.

I insisted on doing hurdles when I ran (ok, "ran" is a very, very generous term) track in high school. One day I was practicing with them, and my back foot got stuck on it and I proceeded to fall on my face and got a huge gash on my knee. People were watching, including all of the hot senior boys. They laughed. Whatever, MALES!

I once puked next to a drink machine in a sandwich shop.

Last summer I was at an arts festival in the city. It was so, so hot that day and even shorts felt too hot/constricting. So I was wearing a (short-ish) skit. We were in one section that was basically a wind-tunnel because all of the tents were in between two buildings. Anyway, as you can imagine, my skirt flipped up like 10 times. No exaggeration. Also, I wasn't even wearing cute underwear.

1) Walked thru my office at work with my dress tucked up in my panty hose. I was not wearing panties. The 1st person to notice was the only guy in the office and he didn't tell me.
2) Went to a basketball game my daughter was cheering in with a pair of hot pink panties stuck to the back of my lime green sweatshirt. No one told me.
3) Most recent was at a night club. The girl dancing next to me was flailing her arms around and somehow she snagged one of my extensions out of my hair. It was stuck on her nail and she was trying to shake it off and trying to figure out what is was. Once it fell off her nail my SO hurried and kicked it under the stage. After the dance we could see her and her partner looking around the floor for it. We were laughing so hard.
4) One day I was walking out of a sports bar and my SO was behind me. He said there was an extension stuck on my butt and it looked like I had a tail.

You know those Staple's "Easy Buttons"? You push the big button and it says "That was easy". Well, I had one in my purse. And I was at a restaurant for brunch. I went to the bathroom, and as I was coming out of the bathroom, passing the table right next to the bathroom, I bump my purse and it says, loudly, "That was Easy". The couple at the table looked at me like I was a freak. But I pretended I had no idea what it was and looked around like I was looking for the source myself. Oh man. I'm sure I turned bright red. I mean, who comes out of the bathroom and announces to strangers "That was easy" during brunch?!

You know those Staple's "Easy Buttons"? You push the big button and it says "That was easy". Well, I had one in my purse. And I was at a restaurant for brunch. I went to the bathroom, and as I was coming out of the bathroom, passing the table right next to the bathroom, I bump my purse and it says, loudly, "That was Easy". The couple at the table looked at me like I was a freak. But I pretended I had no idea what it was and looked around like I was looking for the source myself. Oh man. I'm sure I turned bright red. I mean, who comes out of the bathroom and announces to strangers "That was easy" during brunch?!

I was with a couple of friends, and one of them said to the person behind me 'would you like to sit in the front?' (we were getting in a car)
I thought she was talking to me and acted like it was an honour and said 'are you sure?', all happy, she gave me a look like I was a freak and said, 'uh, no, not you'. Turns out she was talking to the person behind me.
It was humiliating.

...I was leaving a crowded movie theater after the movie was over, and I thought my friends were right behind me. One of the women right behind me (who I thought was one of my friends) said to her friend "Man, I really have to pee!". I, thinking it was my friend, turn around and exaggeratedly exclaim "ME TOO!". Yeah, it wasn't my friends. They were perfect strangers.

I once walked into a glass door. Just like in a cartoon or in one of those windex commercials. To be fair the whole wall was glass and it very clean.

Whenever I eat anything greasy or fiber rich (ie., most fast foods, some fruits & vegetables, etc) my body digests it noisily. There's usually always enough ambient noise around me that I've never paid it any attention. That is until I had to work in an office where they valued being quiet. These people whispered when they wanted to carry on normal conversations. When somebody cleared their throat on the other side of the room, everybody heard it. So, you can imagine how I felt when, my stomach started up. I couldn't control and it took me a minute to find out what the culprit was. I was so embarrassed. For while I was just eating plain rice and pb&j sandwiches because they didn't give me any trouble.

I have too many to remember, my life is others entertainment. and I have one, I do remember, that I will never ever mention ever. It will go into my grave, and the grave of the person who was with me when it happened. It's so embarrassing that I've never discussed it with that person....and we never will. Ever.

One day, when I overcome the mortification of it, I might...might tell it. Probably never because it's too mortifying and I just can't.
It happened over a year ago and I just can't get over it.

Ughhhh I hope that person forgot UGH. I'm dying of embarrassment remembering. It would be funny.....but I can't laugh because I'm still embarrassed.

So when I was a kid we lived in the south in an apartment complex with a pool. I loved swimming so I was at the pool constantly. I never took off my bathing suit except to bathe. I even slept in my bathing suit. I was like that little girl in Mermaids.

So my mom comes home from work and says 'wanna go to the pool?' I was so excited I'm like YES! I had been up there with a friend earlier that day so I grabbed my stuff and ran out the door. We set up our stuff and I can't wait to get in the water so I whip my shirt off and pull down my pants, and my mom gasps...

I'd forgotten that after I went swimming with a friend I took a bath and changed my clothes and I wasn't wearing a bathing suit.