On Tuesday we posted an article about how gratitude can help you on your journey to acceptance after an affair. The author’s mention of the practice of gratitude intrigued us and motivated us to do a little bit more research on the subject. Today we wanted to delve a little bit more into this whole […]

by Tim Tedder There are few pains deeper than those caused by an affair. Among thousands of infidelity cases I’ve encountered, I do not know of a single betrayed partner who escaped those wounds. The path toward healing is long and difficult, leaving many to wonder if they will ever feel “normal” again. Most eventually […]

We’ve had this blog now for almost five years, and over that period of time we’ve had the honor of communicating with thousands of people who have been affected in some way by infidelity. It just so happens that about 85% of the time it has been with those whose spouse has been unfaithful. In […]

“Healing means recognizing that The Trauma You is just one aspect of who you are. Sure, right now it may be the dominant aspect, but it’s still only one part of the whole you. Recovery gains strength by learning to (re)recognize the rest of who you are with more and more clarity.” Betrayed spouses and […]

“It’s time to move on.” “I know I screwed up and I know I won’t do it again.” “Digging up all these past wounds doesn’t do either of us any good.” Have you heard (or said) any – or all – of these phrases in the past? Of course you as the betrayed also want […]

I was talking to my father the other day and he mentioned to me that it was the ten year anniversary of my grandpa passing away. I hadn’t remembered that at all, but after hearing that I started to travel down memory lane just a bit to think about my grandparents. One thing that always […]

“We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” – Kenji Miyazawa The pain of being betrayed by your spouse is a strong feeling that can be difficult to process. Why? Because the trauma of the betrayal creates within us many emotions, such as fear, confusion, shame, guilt, anger, and resentment. These […]

Reflections on what I’ve learned and what I wish I’d known twenty years ago. by Tim Tedder I remember one particular afternoon in college when, for some reason, I became deeply contemplative during a walk from class to my dorm room. My considerations turned to future expectations, imagining what path my life would take. What […]

My mother had to have a cancerous kidney removed this week, so needless to say we’ve been spending a lot of time at the hospital. Thankfully, the cancer that was discovered was determined to be fully contained within the kidney, so at 80 years of age, my mother has a pretty clean prognosis going forward. […]

One thing that is at the core of the healing process and is very crucial to be aware of and to understand is the difference between pain and suffering. It took me awhile to catch on to this myself, but in my experience I’ve learned this to be true: Pain is something that occurs in […]