100+ Cowbell Tracks: Game Over

Holy Fuck, can we all agree that I need to put this whole cowbell obsession to rest, once and for all? Below I’ve listed the 6 CD’s that I put together for my sister for Xmas. It was a 2 month job, and I spent as much time on the flow of the tracks on the discs as I did hunting through my CDs to find them. I can’t say I did a great job, but 108 tracks of cowbell without relying on any typical classic rock tracks disqualifies any arguments against quality.

I named the collection Cowbell++ as a nod to the nerds* and made her color coded CD covers to make them look a little cooler. And even if you think the whole thing is retarded, who can argue with a title like “Cowbell++ Volume 2: The Wrath of Khow”?**

The first 2 CD’s make no distinction between analog and digital cowbell, but the last 4 are solely analog. No matter if you are a cowbell purist (ANALOG OR DEATH! DINK DINK!) or loose hiphop cowbell aficionado (Whatcha gonna do with all that bell, all that bell up in them jeans?), there should be at least a disc that you can appreciate.

I can easily say that this is the most time I spent on an present. The first 2 are for dancin’ when no one is lookin’, the second two are for drivin’ when no one is clockin’, and the final two are for seducin’ rich old timers when the nurse ain’t around. I’m proudest of the tracks on the first two, the covers on the second two, and the fact that I pulled the fifth and sixth out of my ass in a mere two days right before Xmas. And if you can believe it, there were actually a few tracks that didn’t make the final cut. With this post, I am officially putting the cowbell talk to rest. Happy Xma-birthday, Sis. Game Over.

*Putting ++ after a variable in some programming languages is a way to increment the variable. For example, if $x=665, then $x++ will increment $x to 666.
**The subtitle of Star Trek II was “The Wrath of Khan.”

Cowbell++ Vol. 1: WTF (What the Funk)?

Sir Mix-A-Lot – Baby Got Back

Jay-Z – Big Pimpin’ (Feat. UGK)

Z Trip – All About the Music (feat. Whipper Whip)

Sugar Hill Gang – Rapper’s Delight

Beastie Boys – Hey Ladies

Marvin Gaye – Got to Give it Up

Stevie Wonder – Don’t You Worry ’bout a Thing

KC And The Sunshine Band – Sound Your Funky Horn

The Chemical Brothers – Orange Wedge

Aretha Franklin – Rock Steady

Ohio Players – Love Rollercoaster

Con Funk Shun – Too Tight

Gap Band – Steppin’ (Out)

Lipps Inc – Funkytown

KC And The Sunshine Band – Get Down Tonight

Dj Shadow – The Number Song (Cut Chemist Party Mix)

KC And The Sunshine Band – (Shake, Shake, Shake) Shake Your Booty

Nelly – Hot In Herre

Lyrics Born – Do That There (feat. Cut Chemist)

Stevie Wonder – Pastime Paradise

Cowbell++ Vol. 2: The Wrath of Khow

Gap Band – Party Train

Chemical Brothers – Come Inside

The Chemical Brothers – In Dust We Trust/Song to the Siren

Missy Elliott – Work It

Shannon – Let The Music Play

Beastie Boys – Alright Hear This

Nelly – Na Nana Na (ft Jazze Pha & Jasper Cameron)

Newcleus – Jam On It

Nelly – Flap Your Wings

The Chemical Brothers – Chemical Beats

Chemical Brothers – Hold Tight London

Missy Elliott – Go To The Floor

N.W.A – Gangsta Gangsta

Chemical Brothers – Close Your Eyes

Barry White – Can’t Get Enough Of Your Love, Babe

Cowbell++ Vol. 3: Rockin’ Without Dokken

Fu Manchu – Ampn’

The Donnas – All Messed Up

Fu Manchu – Mongoose

Guns N’ Roses – Nightrain

Skid Row – Monkey Business

Cinderella- Shake Me

The Dirtbombs – Maybe Your Baby

The Donnas – You Wanna Get Me High

The Dirtbombs – Little Miss Chocolate Syrup

Southern Culture on the Skids – Voodoo Cadillac

The Donnas – On the Rocks

Guns N’ Roses – Mr. Brownstone

Fu Manchu – Separate Kingdom

Guns N’ Roses – Welcome To The Jungle

Cowbell++ Vol. 4: Rock… ’til you Drop

Fu Manchu – Blue Tile Fever

Fu Manchu – Urethane

Guns N’ Roses – It’s So Easy

Dirtbombs – Livin’ For The City

Fu Manchu – Time To Fly

Fu Manchu – Trapeze Freak

Son Volt – Drown

Southern Culture on the Skids – Fried Chicken and Gasoline

Dirtbombs – Do You See My Love (For You Growing)

Fu Manchu – Mega-Bumpers

Guns N’ Roses – Think About You

Beatles – Everybody’s Got Something To Hide Except Me and My Monkey

Fu Manchu – Wurkin’

Fu Manchu – Freedom of Choice

Guns N’ Roses – My Michelle

Rage Against The Machine – Killing In The Name

Cowbell++ Vol. 5: Lounging Around

Perez Prado – If you knew Susie (Like I know Susie)

Esquivel – Cherokee

Tito Puente and Woody Herman – New Cha-Cha

Tito Rodriguez – The Magnificent Seven

Stan La Baum and His Orchestra – A La Salud

Yma Sumac – Gopher Mambo

Esquivel – All of Me

Jackie Davis – Glow Worm Cha-Cha-Cha

Martin Denny – Hawaii Tattoo

Laurindo Almeida & The Bossa Nove All Stars – Recado Bossa Nova

John Buzon Trio – It Must Be True

Jack Costanzo and Don Swan – Bei Mir Bist Du Schon / La Furiosa

Tito Puente and Woody Herman – Mambo Herd

Esquivel – Speak Low

Paris Combo – Moi, mon a me et ma conscience

Rinky Dinks – Choo Choo Cha Cha

Dean Martin – Cha Cha Cha D’ Amour

Tito Puente and Woody Herman – Tito Meets Woody

Yma Sumac – Taki Rari

Perez Prado – Ola Conga

Sounds Orchestra – Mas Que Nada

Los Albinos – The Swinging Conga

Mallet Men – 80 Drums Around The World / Dark Eyes / It Happened In Monterey

Holy Crap!.. That’s too cool for words… I’ve always if anyone would take the whole Christopher Walken cowbell thing and run with it to its required end.. Any chance of getting these tracks along with the artwork online somewhere?

Hell, I’ll even make an account for you on my webserver and host the damn thing, just for the fun of it.

see? see? you are a creative genius!!! and i’m not just saying that because we’re related and if you’re a genius, i must be a genius too. we should be a team. i’ll come up with the ideas and you spend tireless hours bringing them to life. we could be called….”dyerama”. ok, maybe i need to work on that. see what hours spent away from jerry springer can do for your creative juices? you should try to sell them online. i bet you could. you could just burn copies for people. nobody will want to go to the effort of downloading all those songs when they can send 3 easy installments of $19.99 to the address on your screen (does not include shipping and handling). aaawwww yeah. you opened the door of the cowbell and you won’t be able to close it.

Missing is Northern State – Last Night. Bad song, but it has cowbell. Also, I apologize for never sending you a mix cd. I wrote the tracklist out and everything, I just never burned it. Maybe one day, we can all dream.

What you should do is sign up to be an iTunes affiliate. Then go to iTunes and create your own playlist. Then link to the playlist you created and when people buy the songs, you get a kickback. It’s the only legal way to do it.

Good suggestion, Matt, I’m not sure about being an affiliate. I don’t think I really want to support the whole iTunes thing. It’s the same reason I’m not an Amazon Affiliate. I guess they’re ok companies, but I just don’t want to get into that.

I want to buy all of these from you. You are my hero for putting these together and I really wish you were my brother. I’m completely serious. If you don’t want to sell them, may I send you CDs and cookies? “I’ve got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell.”