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Saturday, December 29, 2007

If you take that blonde broad right there...Throw a tight black polka-dotted dress on herCurl her hair, add heelsAnd maybe a red boa for effect.

Will she act classy?Polite, even?

Or will she still swear like a sailorChug back her beerEat everything in sightAnd allow people to throw candy Rockets at herSo she can 'expertly' catch them in her mouth?

Well.

When she woke up yesterday morningRemembering the entire bag of chips she ate.That complimented her beer and the pizza that had gone coldAnd as she found the Rockets on the floor that she had shaken from her bra the night before

She became pretty damn sureThat you can dress her upAnd take her outBut she'll always beThe foul-mouthed, beer-sluggin', grease-devouring metalheadThat she has always been.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Just be thankful that I haven't posted any metal versions of regular Christmas tunes. Wait, maybe I'll do that tomorrow....

It's Tuesday already. I feel like I didn't have a weekend. On Saturday and Sunday I didn't leave the house, didn't even have ONE cigarette (proud? anybody? no? screw off.), ingested no alcohol, wore no makeup, and sat on my ass. I'd say it was uber productive.

Today I will continue to write damn articles... cuz that's what I do. Perhaps I'll work on the book that I've been neglecting for the past few months. I'm kind of an asshole like that. I start something with ya... put a little time and effort in... then ignore you cuz there's other interesting things to play with. Oh, 'yet to be named novel'.... I'm sorry. Let's have coffee and talk about our feelings.

I also need to mention that there's a new superhero hittin' the streets... he goes by PseudoBoy. He doesn't fight crime or anything. He just stops traffic with his hot ass. And DAMN, does he ever rock those tights. I think I'm kinda bajiggety about him, maybe one day I'll kiss him or something.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

This broad... is all class. I don't really remember wearing Raf's hat, and taking a picture while he wore a Marilyn Monroe wig... but I guess it happened. I was fairly sober on this eve, as well.

Whaaateva.

I love my Sammy... especially while she's got on her old man hat and singing "Rock rock rock rock, rock & roll Asians", dedicated to a great man.

I'm snowed in, as many people are. All my plans for the day have fallen by the wayside. No wonky dinner thing (which is good), no going to Toronto to visit my sister for her 30th, and no going to see the boy even though I haven't seen him all week. Boo-friggin'-urns.

Anyway... I don't really mind staying in, cuz I tend to be a bit of a hermit. If I'm not at a bar, I'm at home. Er... switch that. I'm at home more than bars. Really. I swear.

I did pretty well this week... I only went out on two nights. That also means that I only left my house twice.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Every once in awhile I allow myself to become negative to the point of insanity. I'm so neurotic and over-analytical that I just don't think straight.

These are the days when it's SUPER fun to be around Kristen.

Yes, on these particular days I'm even known to speak in third person.

So although most of my friends and family don't even know I have a "blog" (quotations cuz it's not a real blog..), some of you do. Therefore:

If Kristen (yup, third person again) has, at any point today, : insulted you, pushed you away, ignored you, confused you, growled at you, bitten off a piece of your flesh, eaten your food, tried to steal your baby, or made you sad in any way, shape, or form.....

Friday, December 14, 2007

Looking back at pictures from awhile ago, I realize how much has changed in a few short years. How much I'VE changed.

Maybe not so much in appearance, but in so many different areas. Jobs, home life, relationships, the people around me... they have all changed and fluctuated a lot.

As a chick who's big into nostalgia, I have a lot of things saved and documented so I can always look back and see where I've been, what I've done, and how I used to feel. It can be a really sad thing when you realize that you aren't as happy as you thought you'd be. Or when you see that the things you loved are gone.

The thing about pictures specifically is that they only show the good times. You never take a picture of a fight. Or heartbreak. Or when everything is going wrong. Pictures are false that way - we play happy for the camera, in hopes that we won't be reminded of the bad times when we look back.

In that respect, I'm lucky. The happy faces in the majority of the pictures I have are real. And I'm glad to see a few main people alongside me in those happy pictures. People that have been with me through the breakups, the worst bouts of depression, insecurities, and other bullshit.

So yeah, key people leave you... insignificant people come and go... but the important people are always there. The past few years may have included a lot of pain and confusion, but they also included great times with my best friends. And looking at these pictures, I see that I may not be exactly where I want to be in life... but I'm farther than I've been in the past. I can deal with that.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Because of it, I can keep in touch with my best friend who moved away. It keeps her psychiatric bills lower, cuz hey... I'm free.

I can talk to my 'pseudo boy' at all times, which makes me happy because no one puts me in a better mood.

I can communicate with people that I don't actually want to talk to. I'll be honest, I dislike a lot of people. If I have to converse with some of these ignorant bastards, I'd rather do it without hearing or seeing them.

One of the greatest things about the interweb... is that I can work from home, in my sweatpants, with messy hair and no makeup, possibly hungover, and still fool people into thinking that I'm some sorta professional.

The universe smiles down on geeky hermits like me.

Thank you, Bill Gates. Your cheque's in the mail. Like you need a friggin' nother one.