I write here to those who I cannot write to, Here you read from those who don't write to you.

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Open letter to my ex

In case you didn’t realize! It’s my birthday today. I don’t expect you to wish me and well you have 22 hours to prove me wrong. That shouldn’t be too hard! You have proved me wrong a hundred times, haven’t you?Let’s not get bitter, after all it’s my birthday.

As I lay here on my bed, I think of my first birthday we spent together. How you were considering to visit your parents that weekend and my very obvious anger had changed your plans! Birthdays weren’t such a big deal to you, you had said. An excuse I can still not accept. But you did make that birthday special. You cooked something sweet and fed me like I was a baby. I remember asking you for a gift and you had sent me to the adjacent room only to find a book from my favorite author. For a non-reader like you, remembering his name was a real feat. No fancy wrappers, no tiered cake, no crowd of cheering friends. It had just been you and me in that little apartment.

The next birthday had been quite the same. Just you and me, a little trinket as a gift that I still hold dear and a blog you created for me to showcase my talent to the world. We had both forgotten the site address in a few weeks!

The last birthday I spent with you was surely the most special. You had actually planned the day for us, I was so surprised cause we had already broken up! Boating across that lake holding hands without thinking of our fate, having lunch in that fancy place, holding you tight I sat behind you on that bike. That evening I was pretty sure I had won you again! But I was naive, I tried to test my new found faith and failed. You scolded me but I begged you to forgive and attempted to make some space for me again. And then I did that again and again, until that one day when I just didn’t want to get back to you ever again!

No I’m not writing to complain. I’m only upset because each happy memory with you is stained by all that separation bitterness. It’s such a shame cause my happiest moments so far have been my your side.