1.13.2011

what is it with life? always throwing you curveballs? just when you start to get comfy *wham*.

there's something different now, though. things really have shifted in my life. lately, the *wham* is something i utterly and totally believe in with all my heart. like it's here for a reason, and it holds these gifts deep inside of it, and if i'm patient and stay true in my feelings, i will see them. i will see them and hold them and they will become a part of me that sticks.

2011 has been full so far, already. and i know i have asked for these little curveballs. i know when i say outloud to the universe "i'm ready!" at the top of my lungs, that its listening. and i'm just now figuring out that not only is it listening, but its smiling like a cheshire cat as well ;)

what i know deep inside is that it's all about love. i am learning love in new ways. unconditional ways, and super-charged-feeling ways, and across time & space ways. unsegregated ways. there's really no box you can put it in. it's showing me so clearly that the energy of the heart is a force to be reckoned with.

and this trust thing i keep talking about. i wish i could box it and share that with everyone. because that is the key to everything in life. we spend so much time pushing it away, worrying, fretting, fearing, gossiping, getting caught up in hairballs of drama when if you just go back to the beginning, the childlike ease, and TRUST things just work out. and let me be clear here - that doesn't in any way stop the curveballs or the *wham*. those come with the territory, it seems, but you have a choice: look at them and trust that they are coming at you for a reason, or run for your freaking life in fear. and wash, rinse, repeat: create more of the same. believe me, i've done my share of both. but door number one works best for me, since i've been choosing it consistently for a while now. thank god i caught the clue.