My girlfriend posts really nasty memes when we have a fight, including hash tags like #cheater, #liar, #dog, etc. and doesn't see a problem with it. Then, she'll post love quotes and stuff, which I feel is attention-seeking. When I confront her, she says it's not about me (when I know it is). I've asked her to stop, but she won't.

After a recent fight, I asked her to block my daughter because it's not right my little girl sees our private stuff. Again, she refuses. One time, I told her to delete her posts or else I'd walk... she didn't, so I broke up with her. Immediately after, her bagging posts started again. I was a fool and came back.

Am I just a fool that I can't see the big picture? I think relationship stuff should be private... am I being petty?

At the End of My Rope

Dear At the End,

Let me answer your questions backwards.

Are you being petty? No.

You have every right to be upset. Passive-aggressive behavior is never healthy, let alone on social media for all to see. It's damaging because it points a shameful finger at you in public without allowing you to answer in a respectful way. She might say "it's not about you," but yes... all her friends (and yours) know who she's talking about. Also, it puts you in an awkard position -- you either 1) stay maturely silent or 2) get into a public fight over personal matters, which just seems unnecessarily dramatic.

Now... onto the second question. Are you a fool? Well, I won't call you a fool. But, you can't keep on walking back into a relationship that is unhealthy. The reason why your GF posts passive aggressive posts after you fight is to validate her hurt and to feel better about herself. Notice, there was no mention of you in that reason... well, because... it's not about you at all. It's all about her. And that's a problem... since love requires you to care more about the other person. The truth is, she might not actually be ready for a real, grown-up relationship. And look, we've all been where she is. I've certainly had my moments of immaturity and insecurity in relationships, too. And when I look back at those moments, I realize now that I wasn't ready to love in an healthy way.

At the end of the day, you have to follow your heart. But I'll leave you with this: if you want a relationship that is guided by love, then don't stand for anything less. Someone who loves you -- as a person -- and values your relationship will prioritize and realize that your feelings and preserving the integrity of your relationship are more important than "immediate" (but temporary) self-therapy through social media attention.

Hope this helps.xo,Natalisep.s. Fighting in relationships are natural. Just make sure you're both fighting fair. Listen to John Legend's "All of Me" to remind yourself what love sounds like.