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I can barely described how thrilled I was a couple of weeks ago when the “All-Stars 3” cast for “RuPaul’s Drag Race” was announced. I don’t really give a rat’s ass about most of the contestants; I was just glad that Trixie Mattel is coming back to the show.

Trixie is barely a Virgo, with her sun in the first degree of the sign (a point that is especially powerful, according to many astrologers). I don’t have her time of birth, but I wish I did. She has a fascinating natal chart — the kind I could talk about all day long. Her moon is in either Taurus or Gemini. If the former is true, every planet but Venus sits in one of the feminine signs in her chart. There is no fire in her horoscope whatsoever.

That’s cool, but it is sort of irresponsible to explore Trixie’s chart much further without a birth time, so I’ll just talk about what I do know about her. She’s smart. There is nothing I appreciate more in a drag queen than a good sense of humor, and Trixie is as witty as they come. She also represents a couple of the Virgo archetypes I discuss in my book. As Trixie, she is one of those Virgos who conceives a self-image that makes her look more like an art project than a real woman. As Brian Firkus, the musician, she is more like the “uncorrupted” Virgo I also describe in my book. You can learn more by clicking the “BUY MY BOOK” link at the top of the page. I can’t just give everything away for free. I’m not Katya!

Speaking of Katya, “The Trixie & Katya Show” premieres on Viceland next week. Katya would have been the Taurus entry on my “Dream Team” if Pandora Boxx and I didn’t go way back. One of the most Virgo-like qualities about Trixie is the way that she plays the “straight man” to Katya’s character. Of course, she’s just as goofy as Katya, but her delivery is a little more “considered.” Virgos are thinkers, and they usually take a moment before they blurt out the first thing that comes to their mind. It makes them great comedians when they’ve got their wits about them. Trixie has the discipline that Katya often lacks.

Still, I adore both of them. I can’t wait for Trixie to take the crown on “All-Stars 3.” That would make her the second Virgo queen to wear the crown, along with Jinkx Monsoon. I’m sure that there are plenty of Virgo queens who have lip-synched for their lives (for some reason, I think Pearl is a Virgo), but I’m too lazy to look the rest of them up. Even Michelle Visage is a Virgo. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive her if she fucks this one up for the home team . . .