Stephen Hawking will now be studying apocalyptic robots

My friends and I will save the world from threats you are too dumb to understand.NASA

Remember how we told you about that think tank in England that think tanks about really weird stuff, like how human beings might avoid being destroyed by robots? If that freaked you out and you were like, “Shit, I hope those people at the Cambridge Project for Existential Risk are smart enough to figure out how to save us from killer robots,” well, you have more reason to feel secure under their protection, because Stephen Hawking is joining them in their efforts.

Hawking, 71, brings his 50-plus years of experience in theoretical physics, cosmology, and general all-around genius to the group. No word on whether he will focus on killbots, extreme climate change, “emerging technologies” (meaning, in this case, stuff that seems great that could turn around and kill us all, other than robots which are already covered), or any of the other crazy threats that normal people can’t wrap their mind around, but we have every confidence in him. We’ll just be home trying to figure out how to wrap duct tape around a frayed cord, because when it comes to emerging threats, that’s about all we can handle.