‘Revolutionary’ new iPhone can remove stones from horses’ hooves.

Apple has unveiled the latest generation of the popular iPhone mobile. The redesigned device has a range of features new to mobile technology including a tape measure, an attachment that can remove stones from the hooves of lame horses and a novel set of toe clippers.

Speaking at the global launch of the gadget, Apple boss Steve Jobs said: ‘I can say with confidence that this version of the iPhone represents the pinnacle of twenty first century technology. Our designers have been working 24/7 to accommodate the stream of originality cascading from our team of creative guys. This iconic smartphone features a number of killer applications, and I’m not just referring to the handy flick knife included in our street model.’

Mr Jobs continued to explain why the new iPhone included two cameras; one at the front and one at the back. ‘This allows you to take photos of where you’ve been, as well as where you’re going to. I must admit I was stunned when they came up with this one.’

Initial, press reaction was mixed. ‘I loved the stone remover, and the cigarette lighter but struggle to see the point of the telephone feature. That is so yesterday.’ said BBC’s technology correspondent Rory Cellan-Jones, adding, ‘and like every one else, I can’t see why they couldn’t have pushed the boat out and included a decent corkscrew.’

Meanwhile, Steve Jobs provided a hint of things to come. ‘We’re wrestling with the holy grail of digital mobile technology. Once we’ve mastered it we will be able to provide a device that will deal with cellophane and plastic wrapping.’

coming in particularly handy in time for the fox hunting season starting in urbania London. Daily mail considers sponsoring the Royal family. The inbuilt sat nav will also help the hunters to find their way in and out of urbania.

Ostsee, I do. I really have nothing against Apple (the company.) I have plenty against the smug attitudes of their users. "Oh, but it's just so intuitive. And, if you do anything creative, you just have to have it, blah-be-de, blah, blah, blah." Fcuk off.