a mothers distress

my son aged 46 has scitzophrenia and is currently going through a psychotic episode and all his anger and frustration is directed at me. he believes all his clothes and shoes are poisoned, and his food. his is in a psyche ward and is refusing medication. he also has somatisation disorder which means he believes he has a lot of physical ailments, bad back, sore knee, shoulder injury etc which causes him to continually go to different drs and hospitals for x rays, cat scans, mris etc. so he gets angry because i wont beleive him. accuses me of neglect and threatened to report me to police, says he hates me forever, and verbally abuses me. now that he is in psyche ward he calls and begs and cries for me to bring in more clothes, shoes and that if i dont he will end up in a wheelchair, be crippled, and says to me i am your son, you are my mother, if you dont help me i will never talk to you again, this is your last chance and then he hangs up. i have been to visit and he is angry and says i know you dont believe me, the nurse doesnt like him, they take all his possessions, and he is refusing to take his meds. i try to be supportive and tell him i love him. this is causing so much stress and emotional despair. before he was admitted to psyche ward he had been reported missing to police, as he was just being assessed by mental health team and did a runner when he knew they were coming to see him. he has no insight at all into his condition, his hygiene is non existent, unable to manage his own affairs. his stay is psyche ward has been extended. injections now to start if still not taking meds.

Re: a mothers distress

Hi @pat1, my son's in late-20's also has Sz and some of your story sounds very familiar. I was the worst dad in the world when my son was admitted and all the accumulated blame went my way. Have a day or two off from visiting. It might be the only chance you get to have some respite.

Re: a mothers distress

@pat1 Hi pat1 and welcome to the forums. I am a parent of a son with multiple problems including schizo. I agree with @patientpatient while your son is in the psych ward it is a perfect time for you to have much needed time out. You must do this as your health both mental and physical needs protecting for not only your son's well being but yourself.

You son is 46, well and truly an adult, so you have been going through this for along time my heart goes out to you. Your son is in a safe place. It is safe to back away atm and give yourself time out.

I am tagging @Dadcaringalone who is a great bloke who has been there with us.

Re: a mothers distress

What you describe is very familiar to me and my son. The combination of the blame, lack of insight and reluctance to take medication is very similar to what I have experienced with my son over the last 6 years. We had 2 hospitalizations last year and it was an absolute nightmare for me his only carer! Please take a rest and do something for yourself!! This is critical because it might be bad now, but it could in fact get worse as you both walk the fine line of trying to get him on the right medication cocktail to stabilize his symptoms. In fact my son ran off from Emergency when we were last trying to admit him and I was at blame for everything, you’ve fxxxxed he would say all the time. His threats of calling the police have even came true for me because he was seriously psychotic and I had to restrain him from self-harm and I got arrested for helping him, so it can unfortunately get a lot worse. Got the best ever advice from my cousin who has cared for my aunty with bipolar for most of her life “self-care, self-care, self-care“ please emphasize this a lot Pat1 because you need to be mentally strong and physically fit. I get it that you want to be in the hospital as much as possible so he doesn’t become institutionalized but try as much as you can to take a break and do something for yourself because you deserve it and need it!

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