* We reserve the right not to print them.
</td> <td style="background-color:White;color:Black;font-family:Arial; padding-left:20px; width:40%;"> In a related story, organ donor cards are now available to all visitors to Luna. This wonderful contribution to our community should be snapped up by everyone!
Who knows when YOU might need a spare arm or leg? Or perhaps even a replacement head!
Cards can be purchased for the incredibly cheap price of 10,000 gp each.
Interested parties can make their applications three hundred paces east of Luna's east gate.
For more details, ask for Puffy.
</td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan='2' style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial";font-size:10pt;'> Editor's Note: Readers may wish to take out a 5-year subscription to ensure they do not miss our follow-up article! </td> </tr> </table>

<table style="width:95%;border:none;background-color:White;color:Black;text-align:left;"> <tr> <td style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial Black";font-size:16pt;font-style:italic;'> DRAGONS ARE WIMPS! </td> <td style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial Black";font-size:16pt;font-style:italic;width:45%;padding-left:20px;'> KNIGHTS? WHAT KNIGHTS? </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <div> The citizens are revolting.
Why? The cause seems to be simple - the new breed of Dragons. Our intrepid reporter investigated. Then, we sent a less intrepid reporter out, wearing some armor this time.
Dragons. Now, personally, I like dragons. Keeping one in my dungeon has always meant that my tower was warm in winter, and opening random windows as passers-by came near was always good for a laugh.
However, the new breed of these beasts seem to have many people feeling rather unsettled.
To this, I say, good! Ye SHOULD be unsettled! Have ye not noticed yet where ye chose to make thy home?
I say these dragons need to be made even stronger! Faster! And untamable! Have them take flight, and descend on our towns!

</div> <div style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial Black";font-size:16pt;font-style:italic;'> Skin care specialists flock to Moonglow </div>
<div> Upon hearing of the dreadful plight of the berzerkers who wander about the streets of Moonglow, a contingent of [QWAK], that intrepid band of healers, physicians, and therapists, have descended on the dark side of that town. &quot;We cannot bear to see the poor beasts suffer so!&quot; one noted dermatologist commented. &quot;It is high time that Lord British did something about all the spilled poison potions in the rivers! Just look at this poor creature's skin! Won't someone think of the creatures?!?&quot

A rather confused looking spotty balron was brought forward at this point for demonstration purposes. Please pardon the blood stains on this report. </div>

<div style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial Black";font-size:16pt;font-style:italic;'> Best Chest In The West? </div>
<div> A strange occurance, amidst the strange occurances that bedevil Moonglow of late, has come to our attention.
It appears that the treasure chests which the Dark Wisps occasionally carry with them has become sentient!
Aye, chests in large numbers have been mysteriously travelling upstream towards the dark portal, presumably in order to reach their ancient spawning grounds at the foot of someone's bed!

This, many may have thought, meant the end of The Knights of The Silver Serpent.
It is with great joy that I can tell you that it did not.
This past week, two of the most patient, longest suffering ladies that Siege has to offer, finally put aside their Initiates robes, and became soldiers of KSS! A small portion of the ceremony follows:

"Initiate Angharad,
Initiate Alizaren,
we have heard your oaths, and by Mithras, I bind them!
Thy old life is gone, put to death by thy own courage and virtue!
You are reborn to Mithras!
Rise, Sisters of The Silver Serpent!"

The following speech was also given, by thy good editor and Knight Commander.
"As ye probably know, Lord Py Lethius has heard the call of an honorable quest
tis one that takes him to a strange land. One with little or no magic
One where his loved ones of the House of Lethius dwell
and where he will be focusing all his might on their care
That, to my mind, is more worthy a calling than any battle with dragons
or fighting back a thousand foes
But, he created something great in this land
he created a force for justice
He created, at one time, a sense of security in the minds of the weak
I remember when I was newly born into these lands
the relief that was felt when a wave of blue came crashing into those who would kill the weak
We are far from those days now
I cannot promise to return those days.
But, I can promise to try with all I have to give.
I am not Py Lethius. I can only aspire to be Py Lethius. I began as a crafter. He, as a warrior.
But, ye have my commitment, that, as long as I draw breath, The Knights of The Silver Serpent
will never die."

*KSS will be starting to take applications for new initiates, should any be interested. Details can be found on this scroll. </td> </tr> </table>

<div style='height:1pt;border:solid 1pt silver; width:100px;'></div>
<div style='background-color:White;color:black;font-family:"Arial Black";font-size:12pt'> HELP FOR NEWCOMERS! </div>
New to Siege?
Been PK'd sixteen times already, and you haven't even left your starting point yet?
Wondering what's going on and where everyone is?

Wonder no more!

The helpful, friendly staff at [NEW] are just waiting to help you! (Yes, really. This is not satire.)
Come along, introduce yourself, and let NEW help you start your NEW life on Siege!
More details can be found on this scroll!
</td> </tr> </table>

<table style="width:95%;border:none;background-color:red;color:white;text-align:left;"> <tr> <td style="font-family:Arial;font-size:9pt;"> Disclaimer: The views expressed in this publication are not neccesarily those of the publisher, the editor, anyone sane, or that guy standing over there looking at you funny. I suggest you go and hit him. Right now. Yes, him. No, not that one - the other one. Hit the first one too, just in case. Right. I'm glad we got that settled. Disclaimer: This publication takes no responsibility for readers who go around hitting people for no apparent reason. </td> </tr> </table> </div>

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