May 05, 2012

Business 101: Tit For Tat

Tit for tat. Butter for fat. If you kick my dog, I'll kick your cat.

Most people only know the first line.

The rest of the phrase I learned from my grandmother.

The original phrase was Tip for Tap, a very old expression that evolved into tit for tat in the mid-16th century. Tip meant a hit or a shove. Tap was a retaliatory hit. The meaning is a punishment meted out to pay back an offense, measured to be equal and proportionate.

A word of advice to would-be bakery owners regarding tit for tat: Resist.

Resist the temptation to answer hurtful comments some people feel compelled to utter. You may feel better for a short bit, but their hunger for the last word will never be satiated. You say something. They reply. You reply to their reply. It never ends when you both have to have the last word.

Resist the urge to correct falsehoods people may tell about you to their friends and family. They don't really care, won't believe you, and will never take your side. So don't bother. Let them have the last word. They'll eventually get bored and move on to a more interesting target.

Resist the anger and the hurt. But also resist the inclination to buy into the offense or take it personally. The customer is NOT always right, but it doesn't really matter and you have absolutely nothing to gain by pointing that out.