I may have said at one time or another:
"why can't things be the way they were before?"
Maybe the relationship has hit some rocky ground, or
added pressures, or something about my partner has
changed.
People and things change; that's
unavoidable. Sometimes I can have an impact on what
direction the change takes me, such as going job hunting
when my job becomes tenuous, or unsatisfying.
When I want my SO to change their
behavior, outlook, or beliefs to what they were in our
happier times though, I may be flirting with disaster. I
don't have the wisdom to know what type of change is best
for my SO. When I ask them to change to help me be
happier, I'm setting myself up for disappointment, and
their natural resentment at not being accepted as they
are.
What I can do is look more closely at
what I dislike or fear about a particular change. Often I
find that I'm afraid of the unknown. I may be anxious
that the change will bring me more unhappiness, or
turmoil.
What does all this worry get me? Knots
in my stomach. If instead, I simply take the change as it
comes, make the best decisions I can, and accept that
change will always be part of my life, my life will
improve as a natural result.

Just for Today
Today, I will embrace whatever changes
are coming my way, and trust that I will find roses among
whatever thorns they bring.
The only human institution which rejects progress is the
is the cemetery. - Harold Wilson