Matt of All Trades blog, like the title suggests, is by a Vermont author and offers offbeat musings on pop culture, media, journalism, humor, weirdness, stupid people, smart people, my life as a journalist, landscaper, photographer, married gay man, dog lover and weather geek and more. It's run by me, Matt Sutkoski, a native Vermonter living in St. Albans, Vt.

Monday, February 10, 2014

Fox News On The Hunt For Those Dastardly Anti-Business Kids Movies. This Time: Lego.

Thank goodness for Fox News, and Fox Business Newsfor once again rescuing the kids of This Great Nation from a movie that that could encourage the innocent children to not fawn over billionaire corporate executives.

Fox Business News says "The Lego Movie"is indoctrinating our kids into hating CEOsand the American Way of Life!

As we all well know, we must teach our children to expect slave wages and to be expected to work 100 hours a week as adults so those poor unfortunate billionaires can become trillionaires.

I haven't seen the movie, so I might be a little fuzzy on the facts, but apparently, a villian in the movie runs some sort of corporation.

Charles Payne of Fox Business News is pained that the villian is, Sigh! once again a CEO. Says he:

"Why is the head of a corporation, where they hire people, people go to work, they pay their rent, their mortgage, they put their kids through college, they feed their families, they give to charities, they give to churches - why would the CEO be an easy target?" Payne wondered.

Um, maybe because the standard movie plot device is the main characters triumph over someone or something much more powerful than they, and CEOs tend to be powerful?

Yeah, I know, that's my Marxism or something talking. (Never mind that I'm pretty much a card carrying Capitalist. I just not capitalist enough for our friend Charles Payne.)

I think Payne just wants to ignore the fact, that a zillion commentators have noted before I got around to it here:

Not to be Captain Obvious, but the movie is in part one great big advertisement for Legos. Presumably the CEO of the company that makes Legos thought it was a swell idea to tie his product in with a popular movie.

It worked. "The Lego Movie" is boffo at the box office,Lego is going to sell stuff hand over fist, he's going to make a lot of money, presumably the workers at Lego are thusly going to keep their jobs, their houses and will feed their families.

Capitalism wins and the CEO of Lego is a hero! Hurray!

Fox Business has been on the patrol a lot in recent years guarding us from such Marxist indoctrination or our children in the form of movies like "The Lorax," "The Muppet Movie" and "Wall-e."

"Hollywood is once again trying to indoctrinate our children," Dobbs warned.

See! I told you the Marxist were indoctrinating our children!

Go on, Lou:

Lou Dobbs said The Lorax was "demonizing the 1% and espousing green energy policies"

Green energy policies! Oh, the EVIL! God forbid our children grow up and get well paying jobs making wind turbines and solar energy installations!

Then those kids working on wind turbines and solar energy will get decent paychecks because the CEOs of the wind and solar companies had the smarts to create these companies because they, are, um, Capitalists.

(The Muppets did it in a sneaky way, too, by not actually mentioning the oil industry in the movie, but still, the subversion was there. Fox News says so)And this did turn into a war, especially when Miss Piggy responded to Fox News by saying the anti-oil charge against The Muppet Movie was "almost as laughable as accusing Fox News of being news."Oh, those leftist Muppets will stop at NOTHING when turning our children into commies!

After all CEOs tend to have a lot of perks that protect them from the rabble: Money, power and prestige among them. And after all, CEOs are a good source of villian ideas. Most are pretty honest, but a few are spectacularly crooked.

Anyway, as I said, thank goodness for Fox News. I'm sure they'll keep protecting us from that brand of capitalism the movie studios torture us with by selling movies and product tie ins and overpriced popcorn in movie theaters.