New Jersey’s ‘Tan Mom’ Seems A Lot More Sane Today (Video)

Claims to be victim of lifelong fat, ugly person conspiracy

Yesterday the whole world sat up from their collective tanning bed, took the cucumbers out of their eyes, and shook their head in disgust over the tale of New Jersey’s Patricia Krentcil, the 40-year-old mother who stands accused of trying to give her 6-year-old a nice base color.

Today was Ms. Krentcil’s court date, and of course TMZ was there to capture Mr. Krentcil sounding like a completely in-control person who should be allowed to have custody over her daughter.

“There’s somebody out there for my whole life that doesn’t like me because they are jealous, fat and they’re ugly.”

Why do the most train-wrecked among us always think that people hate them because of their beauty? (See also: Lindsay Lohan, Samantha Brick, everyone on a Real Housewives show.) Well, we all know the obvious outcome of this one…the court should sentence Ms. Krentcil to her own reality show.