When Negotiations Go Wrong

For most professionals, negotiation is standard operating procedure: receive a job offer, respond with a counter-offer, and then engage in a little back-and-forth until the parties arrive at an outcome that satisfies them both.

But sometimes negotiations go spectacularly awry. The higher-education blogosphere has been on fire this week since a young philosophy professor’s offer of a tenure-track job was rescinded after she started what she probably assumed would be a typical process.

The academic, who was referred to as “W” in the original post on the blog Philosophy Smoker, asked in a brief email for five sweeteners, including a salary bump to $65,000 (it’s not clear what the original offer was), a pre-tenure sabbatical, and a semester of maternity leave.

Her would-be employer, Nazareth College in Rochester, NY, responded by withdrawing its offer, noting that her requests indicated the philosopher would be happier at a larger and less “student centered” university.

What went wrong?

Many observers suggest that, even in the age of Lean In, sexism was at play, especially given the request for maternity leave. Indeed, if W were a man and had asked for all the same sweeteners, minus the maternity leave, would he have been so handily dismissed? We’ll never know in this specific case, though plenty of research suggests that women negotiate less, and are viewed as too aggressive when they do play the game.

Deborah Kolb, an expert on negotiations and gender and an emeritus professor at the Simmons School of Management, says the not-quite-negotiation involved errors on both sides, and some had nothing to do with W’s sex. In fact, she’s seen offers retracted from plenty of cocky male M.B.A.’s who made excessive demands and were laughed out of a job.

She offered a few suggestions on how both sides can improve their odds of coming to a successful arrangement:Do your research and then put your requests in context.

If you want a higher salary, show why it’s reasonable – for instance, others at your experience level, whether inside or outside the company, earn $5,000 more than what the firm is offering.

Understand your bargaining position. This applies to each party in a negotiation. In a weak job market, no matter how terrific they are, candidates can only ask for so much. Similarly, employers all hunting for the same few data scientists might have to pony up more than they planned to keep their prospects from heading to the nearest competitor.

If you’re the employer and a prospective worker makes what seems like outlandish requests, don’t just close the door and declare that person dead to you. Maybe there was some miscommunication or poor setting of expectations. Simply say “We’re really surprised at this response” and leave the next move in the candidate’s hands. Chances are, says Kolb, she’ll backtrack and return with a more reasonable request.

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