To Be Successful, You Need More Than Just Goals — You Need Friends

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By Natalie Burg

Yes, goals need to be specific. And yes, they also need to be measurable, achievable, results-focused and time-bound — all qualities of the popular SMART goal-setting strategy.

Goals may be all about looking forward, but to be truly effective, you’ll need to take account of what’s worked for you in the past and what hasn’t — and then consider why.

“Taking inventory of the past is critical,” said life and career coach Jane Scudder. “While there’s a shift in their popularity, there is a reason why companies do annual reviews.”

Scudder suggested keeping track of six-month goals on a calendar. Twice a year, stop to consider what helped you achieve the goals you reached — and what got in the way of those you didn’t.

Scudder suggested keeping track of six-month goals on a calendar.Getty

Establish A Positive Intention

If your goal reminds you of a personal failing, you’re going to lose steam pretty quickly.

“Frame your goals in a positive way,” advised Jonathan Alpert, a psychotherapist and author of “Be Fearless: Change Your Life in 28 Days.”

In other words, if you want to avoid eating junk food between meals, don’t focus on how you’ll stay away from those tempting snacks. Instead, try setting goals around adding healthy, appetite-satiating lean protein to each meal to help you feel fuller longer.

Take Baby Steps

Having a vision of yourself achieving your goal is great. But without some idea of the steps you’ll take to get there, how will it ever be realized?

“Develop a simple action plan,” Gonzalez Freeman said. “This can be as easy as listing out the first five steps you are going to take to get closer to achieving your goal.”

Science agrees. A 2015 Dominican University study found that goal-setters who created specific action commitments and shared those commitments with a friend were more likely to achieve their goal than those who simply set goals.

Tell Your Friends

How important is the friend part? Very. Accountability is critical in goal achievement, and it’s important to find someone who is seriously committed to your success, such as a good friend.

According to Gonzalez Freeman, when clients share their goals only with her, she encourages them to also tell someone with whom they have a genuine connection.

“Sharing your goals with others strengthens your commitment to achieving what you said you wanted to achieve,” Gonzalez Freeman explained. “And it may open doors to more resources that can help you accelerate the process or assist when an unforeseen obstacle appears.”

Celebrate Incrementally

If your goals are big and they’ll take time to achieve, motivation can become a challenge. The solution? Pat yourself on the back.

“Celebrate small achievements regularly,” said life coach Nick Hatter. “Did you lose those 2 pounds? Celebrate! Incorporated that company? Celebrate!”

Prepare For The New You

Often, when reaching for your goals, you’ll change and grow along the way. That’s natural. It’s also something you should be conscious of — and leverage.

“When we make big changes and hit big goals, the reality is that we often step into new versions of ourselves. Being clear on what these versions of ourselves have to include is a powerful way to achieve what we most want.”

Jane Scudder, life and career coach

For example, if you need to be more decisive to perform well in a leadership role you’re pursuing, then looking for opportunities to increase your confidence and decision-making skills will help the future-you succeed.

Keep An Open Mind

Speaking of your future self: That person might not want the same things you do today. Be prepared to adjust, rather than doggedly pursue goals that no longer resonate.

“Remember that your goals and your action plan are living documents that are ever-changing, as you are ever-changing,” Gonzalez Freeman said. “Be open to lessons you will learn along the way — they may be the very ones that inform the next steps of your journey.”

A former downtown development professional, Natalie Burg is a freelance journalist who writes about growth, entrepreneurialism and innovation.