“In ‘The Speed-Dating Pool,’ the pool water still turns blue when you take a leak.”

.

See: skinny, pale choad with back bling in rear of photo

3:25 pm September, 13wonderdouche twin said...

And when I’m not a Red Bull girl during the day I’m taking night classes! I’ve been going to the local community school to become a blood draw nurse, its really gross though so I think I’m going to fall back on plan E since my cosmetology license expired, and go back to work for my dad at the Allmendinger Pancake House he pays me like thirty dollars an hour to seat people……….

Ugh I can’t believe she is still talking, she’s got some hips

on her! more cushin’ for the pushin’! groo up top!!

3:41 pm September, 13UFO Destroyers said...

“So, you’re telling me that your lips were sliced off by a garbage disposal that you thought was a bong?”

3:44 pm September, 13UFO Destroyers said...

“You like these frames? I can get you a pair too. I just gotta wait for my Aunt Edna to fall asleep tonight when I go home. Do you want the chain that comes with ’em?”

6:23 pm September, 13Magnum Douche P.I. said...

So first the pus-like discharge came out, then the sores showed up. But its all cool, they went away like a day or so ago.

6:26 pm September, 13Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Yeah really, before the operation my name was Steve.

7:24 pm September, 13Douchble Helix said...

Sure, I’m always happy to do DB1’s fucking job for him. Like *I* don’t have important things to do.

7:58 pm September, 13Et Tu Douche? said...

“Seriously, he peed in a horse once”

8:21 am September, 14Douchble Helix said...

There will never be enough Yom Kippurs to atone for Snooki and the gang.

1:08 pm September, 14DarkSock said...

“I don’t think I can hold them in any longer. I told you 6 eggs was my limit…”

2:09 pm September, 14DarkSock said...

“Honey, you’re supposed to get in the pool before you pee…”

2:18 pm September, 14Vin Douchal said...

Fucken bastids. Since when is it open season for getting dirty looks and people moving from their (free grandstand) seats while glaring at me like I’m fucking a goat while beating a child for smoking a cigar?

You can suck cocks in public but no cigars. You could use a man like Schwartzenegger again. (to the ‘All In The Family” theme). I think Chris Christie lighting the boardwalk on fire and Putin’s new role as POTUS got Douchey Wallnuts all verklempt and shit.