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Sunday, July 31, 2011

Good for me because today is the final day of my personal challenge! And I not only met my challenge I exceeded it. I'm not sure how many outfits I actually did. I think I should count.

Today's outfit:

Okay so I counted and it ended up being 42 different outfits. I have to double check still that they were all different. But I think they were. Originally I did the challenge to combat my anxiety over choosing an outfit. I thought since I felt anxious about it I would challenge myself to do one outfit per day for the entire month of July. That would have made 31 outfits. I actually outdid that by 11. You know by the end I felt less anxious and now I actually have a much better idea about what looks good on me.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Where I am it is currently 4:24 and I am supposed to be trying to finish up my homework for my last class!!! But alas, my brain is not on planet homework. So here I sit typing(avoiding) what I need to finish! I've been trying to work at it for over an hour and my brain is so sluggish I think I am trying to convince myself that it would be easier tomorrow. What a nasty little way to avoid something I clearly don't want to write about because it would appear as though I can still write, as in I'm writing right now! Okay so my brain is still functioning, it really does come down to what I want to do huh?

Enough pontificating!

The outfit for today is:

Wow, I just counted, only three more outfit days left in the challenge. Good for me.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

I have read about more than one person that calls themselves a cross dresser or a transvestite but they want to surgically alter themselves to have boobs. Many guys also take various forms of drugs to help their breasts grow. This seems a little past cross dresser status and directly into transexual. Once someone starts to permanently alter their bodies I personally say that goes to transexual. Just my opinon.

I thought I would share with you how I go about creating the illusion of breasts. The great thing about my method is that I can take off my shirt, as a guy, and not have man boobs! I can still look like a man when I want to. Wow. I know revelatory!

picture 1 - Obviously no shirt, just a typical, albeit in shape, guy.

picture 2 - This is my cleavage bra. It is a 36A, convertible. It is form Maidenform. I don't have fake breasts on. What I do have is a couple of pairs of cutlets.

picture3 - In this picture I now have on a shapewear top. It is pretty tight, which they are supposed to be. It is a medium. It is also from Maidenform.

picture 4 - This picture just shows my torso with the above undergarments on with a regular shirt. From this camera angle my cleavage is not noticeable.

picture 5 - Obviously this is a different top, but everything underneath is the same. The difference in this picture is a few things. 1 - I pull up my chest skin/pectoral muscles. 2 - The angles of the photo. 3 - This is possibly the most important, the lighting in the photo.

picture 6 - This photo also adds to my cleavage with the necklace that I am wearing in having the pendant rest between my boobs. It adds to the depth effect.

picture 7 - Another picture where my breasts look very large. Nothing different has been done, just by moving the camera angle, this shot was achieved.

picture 8 - My last boobs picture. Again, nothing in my clothing has been changed, the only change was the angle of the camera and hence the angle of the lighting.

There you have it. I posted these pictures to hopefully show that you don't need to surgically alter your bodies to achieve what you may be wanting. With a little help from my clothes I can easily gain the illusion of breasts.

BTW this illusion is good enough that when I walk around frequently men talk to me by staring at my chest instead of my face. I have to say that feels very odd, considering I have no interest in them whatsoever. As a guy it is very educational though in how obvious it is when someone stares at your boobs. Some guys are so crass they don't even try to hide it in any way.

I had other things to do today and I did not get around to trying on an outfit until this evening. I went to my dresser, thought about a skirt I wanted to wear, one of my favorite Guess skirts. Which actually used to be The Favorite Guess skirt, but I got another, if not two more. I really like Guess. I think it is a mental thing as to me it seems very girly, and I love when I can fit into their clothes. Now that I think about it, another thing I like about Guess clothes is that they are very girly. I know I just repeated myself, but its true, I think of Guess as girly, but the clothes themselves are indeed girly. The styling, the cut, the embellishments, I just love em!

Now the shirt is a different opinion for me. I like the under the boob strap. It squeezes me at my smallest point. But I think it is a little flowey. It tends to hang away from my belly and makes me look a little chunky. Which I am not. So I am unsure about the shirt.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Went up to Fresno today. Had a good lunch. I had a doctors appointment later. The doctor ended up being a dink. He did what I wanted but it was not exactly comfortable. The only thing I did like about the experience was what I wore. Him being a dink by the way had nothing to do with me being dressed as a girl.

I read yesterday about various trans people getting discriminated against. Some very sad stories out there. That is one thing that keeps me going. I enjoy going out and being an intelligent unashamed ambassador of being a transvestite. It helps me to sleep better at night. How do you sleep?

Monday, July 25, 2011

It is Monday and here I sit, finding out another way to avoid my homework. Hmm, unusual, no? Oh well.

Here is my outfit for today:

There are only 6 days left in my outfit challenge. I'm doing pretty well with it. But I'll tell ya, the anxiety about accomplishing it really hasn't diminished. I still feel as though I won't be able to accomplish it. It's foolish, I know, because it will actually be quite simplilstic. But the feeling is still there.

Have you ever listened to Dr. Laura Schlesinger? I think she is off the air now. She got fired or quit, I'm not sure, for supposedly saying some racist remarks. Personally I've heard what was said and it really was not what people said it was. It was typical Dr. Laura. Anyways, she was very well known for telling whiny people who were explaining in great detail how they felt about a situation that she didn't really care in the least how they felt about something.

There is right and wrong in the world. Do what's right, regardless of how you feel.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Today was a homework day. I've stayed home and worked on finishing my class. I did manage to continue my outfit challenge.

Yesterdays outfit - worn for driving home:

Today's outfit:

I really like this dress. I saw it in the JCPenny flier a few months ago and I had to go get it. I'm pretty sure I got it for about 50% off. I love watching the ads and spotting a perfect little dress for me. It is a little short though. Also with my heels on it looks a little shorter. But boy my legs sure do look long and lean.

Friday, July 22, 2011

I tried writing about this the other night and things just did not seem to come out very well. Let's see if things go better now.

I've always been very torn about what I choose to do. In the past when I have decided that I will not explore crossdressing I have been very unhappy. But it is weird in that when I do choose to crossdress I have also been unhappy.

I think that my unhappiness has come from not knowing who or what I am. If I could just choose one thing or the other then I could just go for that one thing and then decide to be happy, but if I don't know what I want then I have just felt sort of lost. I've had kind of a tough time coming to the realization of what I want.

And what is that magical mysterious thing that I want? I want to do what I have been doing. Which is doing both. I know now that I am happy being me. Happy being both.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Do you know about being covered in bees? It's an Eddie Izzardism. This is the shirt I got at the concert. It was a very good show. I like his sense of humor and the messages he puts within his comedy. Like atheism. He has a point ya know? Anywho...

Yesterday was the 20th day of my challenge and I wore about four or five outfits. I started off wearing this when we went to the Aquarium of the Pacific in Long Beach:

Shortly thereafter I had to change into a something a little cooler, which I also wore to dinner:

We went to see Eddie Izzard last night at the Hollywood Bowl! How fun! If you do not know of Eddie Izzard then you are out of touch my friend. You really need to go find out about him. A really good introduction would be his HBO special Dressed To Kill. Too funny. And if you are like me, a crossdresser then you will LOVE him.

That's it for now. Its still early in the day and I need to go shower!

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

I know that you can't see it very much in the picture but I am wearing my new hair. I just got it the other day and I really like it. I have the same wig in black but I think I look much more natural as a blond. Its funny, for a long time I avoided blond. I kind of always thought it was very typical. You know the tranny thats dressed up as a little blond tart. That was one and the other thing was that I thought I would get more looks from people if I was parading around as a blond. So I avoided it. I have had many blond wigs over the years but I never really felt comfortable in them.

Recently though I have decided that I just don't care what others may think and besides I look much better as a blond. Back when I actually had my own hair, it was blond. Pretty dang close to the color of the wigs I currently buy. Interesting, no? Obvious, maybe?

The other thing I was pondering today was acceptance. I think that is what I am experiencing more with myself the older I get. Maybe its not acceptance, maybe it is just knowing who I am. I'm not sure, maybe I'm too tired and full of beef, we just had a hugey huge dinner.

I think this is a topic for another day as I just typed and erased like five sentences trying to say what I am thinking about so blah......

Monday, July 18, 2011

So for the last week I have not posted any updates on my July challenge, but I want you all to know that it is still going strong. I may not have posted the outfit pictures, but I have continued with my one outfit per day challenge. Currently I am more than half way done! Woo-Hoo. I'm excited because I have kept up with the challenge and am proud of myself for accomplishing it this far. I'm actually a little disappointed that I am reaching the end as I am finding it more and more enjoyable to prove myself wrong! How so you ask? Well I challenged myself to do this partly because of a nagging little voice that I couldn't. So far I have proved that voice wrong and it feels great, liberating, and confidence building. Hmmm.... Maybe there is something to that whole accomplishing what you think you can't stuff.

For the last week my challenge became more interesting for me as I went camping. I generally do not dress as a girl while camping as it is a little dirty. However I found a way to stick with my goals! But I did not find a way to update my blog while out in the wilderness. Now you get to see a weeks worth of outfits in a single post. How exciting, right?

July 18th

July 17th

This dress is just too cute and I found it at Goodwill for 10 bucks! I have no idea at all where I would ever wear such an item, but I will now need to find one. What do you think of the shirt under the dress? I'm still undecided.

July 16th

July 15th

July14

July13th

July 12th

There you have it. Seven outfits for seven days. I'm pretty pleased with myself. I hope you are happy with yourself also!

Monday, July 11, 2011

Hello there. Today I went rafting down my local river and imagine my surprise when I encountered a brand new tree fall crossing the river. Woo-Hoo good times were bound to follow. Needless to say, I hit the branch, tipped my raft, and got swept down river. I got to ride down the rapids mainly by bonking my butt on the rocks, bonking, okay, scraping my butt on the rocks. Somewhere along the way I bashed my left leg against some boulder and now it feels as though I have a giant charley horse. Ouch!!

Okay well the outfit for today is:

Top - Merona

Skirt - Guess

Shoes - Aerosoles

For now folks, I'm going to go nurse my sore leg. Hope you all are well!!

Sunday, July 10, 2011

In a previous post, July 7th, I wore a really cute red skirt. What I neglected to mention on that particular day was that I had a hell of a time trying to find the right shape wear to wear under that thing. I really like the skirt, but when I bought it I didn't really understand how tight it was and how much would show from whatever, and I mean whatever I wore underneath it. So I went through about an hours worth of changing through various shape wear items trying to find the right pair that wouldn't show through the skirt. I thought what I went with was okay, but not the best. Maybe I should try Spanx? Have any of you tried them? What are your thoughts on them?

My wife feels that shape wear items are for girls that are already skinny. I somewhat agree. I see her point, which is that when she tries on certain items she gets a little overflow where the garment stops. That is a problem, but what I think is going wrong is what items she is choosing to wear. I have found shape wear items that are just a little larger than panties, some that go to my knees, and some that go to my calves. They also go up higher as well. I try to match the shape wear to the clothes that I am wearing.

My choice is to wear it. First of all I generally wear some sort of tighter short boxer like panties. These help to hold the foam pads I wear to help fill out my hips. When I wear a skirt I wear longer shorts that go down to about my mid thigh. These are nice because then I don't wear any panties and have Mr. Happy go down my leg and its not quite as noticeable or as painful as tucking.

Secondly I often wear a tight tank top. The tight tank top combined with a padded A bra and some cutlets is my personal secret to gaining some cleavage. Here is a tip for putting on a tight fitting tank top, but it only works for small hipped girls or guys. Don't put it on over yoru shoulders, which are often larger in guys. Pull it up from your feet. It's much nicer.

Okay I am way tired and have no idea if what I am typing is spelled correctly or makes any sense at all!!!

On July 9th we decided to go wine tasting. It was super hot where we were and I thought it would be nice to wear my new skirt.

Top - Max Studio

Skirt - Guess

Shoes - Bear Claws

A couple of things I have discovered about wearing such a short skirt. It's super comfortable, which is nice. But I am constantly tugging at it, as if it is going to blow up in the breeze and expose my parts. Also while getting in and out of the car you really need to be concerned about showing too much.

Outfit for July 10th

Today I hung out at home and got some homework done. It was a very boring day, but I feel good that I got some work done! Woo-Hoo.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Today I went to several different places and I decided to change my outfit for just about every one of them. The first outfit for today was:

Top - Guess

Skirt - Guess

Shoes - New Balance

This is what I started off wearing today. It is easily the shortest skirt I own and I felt a little as though I be showing my chocha. (Check out, Daddy Likey. She hasn't blogged in about a year or so but it's worth it to look at her blog.) I really like the skirt but when we went to breakfast and had to sit on a broken up piece of vinyl on the bench. Ouch! Then the next thing was my legs totally stuck to it! Lovely! Anywho after that we went on a hike. We forgot water or hats or suntan lotion, but we had a good time. I also felt a little silly hiking in such a short skirt, but it was so nice when the breezes came up and helped cool me off.

After that we came back and decided to go bowling before we had nail appointments. So I changed my skirt:

Top - Guess - same from earlier

Shorts - Guess

Flip Flops - Mossimo

I changed my skirt cause I feel a little self conscious when I go and get my nails done in skirts. We were also going to go bowling so I thought with bending over and throwing a heavy ball I just might be shwoing a little more than I would be comfortable with. We went to the bowling ally, but it was too crowded and we ended up shopping at a local Goodwill instead. Woo-Hoo I got three new things for about 25 dollars. One of the things is a totally cute little dress that I have absolutely no where to wear it, but oh well, it was like 10 bucks!

We shopped and then got our nails done. The salon was nicer, I think we can find better, but it was a nice time. We came back, got dinner reservations and I changed my outfit again:

Top - Guess - the same

Pants - Guess

Shoes - Guess

We had a nice dinner and now I am blogging! Love it. Lovely day. Hope you had a good day also!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Do you know what SFMOMA stands for? I didn't until today. My wife and I went to there, which is the San Francisco museum of modern art. They currently have the Stein collection and we went to see it and the rest of the museum. I can highly recommend it. Well worth the cost. It is a very substantial museum. But I do have to say, what is up with modern art? It is something I really don't get, for the most part. I did learn today the difference of modern art vs. contemporary art. Interesting. Hmm...

Okay so the outfit I wore to the museum for July 7th is:

Shoes - Converse

Jeanrs - LEI - Target

Black Top - Myth NYC

Blue Top - Espirit

I know, I wore the same blue tank yesterday, but it is so cute and such a strong pop of blue. Wonderful! I love it. I chose this outfit for today as it was pretty comfy for walking around the city and the museum. Boy my legs get so tired walking around museums. I really like them, museums that is, but I am always surprised by how tired my legs get!

We came back and I changed into this outfit before dinner:

Shirt - Guess

Skirt - Charlotte Russe

Shoes - Merona

This skirt is a new one I got while shopping yesterday. I really like it, it gives me a great shape. I really like stretchy skirts. The hug the skinniest part of my waist, and hug in on my knees, which is great! The only thing I don't like about the skirt is that it shows every single seem from whatever you are wearing underneath. I think it would be a great skirt to wear with no undies! But for me, that would not be so good! So shape-wear to the rescue! I personally love my various shape-wear items. I should write about that someday. I have so many shape-wear items that are invaluable! Love it!

Oh, bonus picture of my butt. Sorry, but the skirt really makes my butt look so good, I had to show it off!

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Okay so this outfit I wore specifically to go shopping in. We were out and about shopping at a giant outlet mall today. I wanted to wear something easy to get on and off while trying on clothes so I wore this top that is so loose and easily put on and off. The skirt, which is one of my faves, slips on and off so quickly and easily, it is just a pleasure to wear.

July 6th Dinner Outfit

White Top - Guess

Blue under shirt - Espirit

Jeans - Guess

Shoes - Nine West

This outfit is a new one that I got today. I have been wanting Guess jeans for awhile now and decided it was time to find them. I really like the colors on them. I didn't notice it at all, but they are really bleached on the fronts of them and dark on the edges of each side of the leg. It really makes my legs appear to be very skinny. I mean my legs are in pretty good shape, but they don't always look thin while in girl clothes. These jeans really do that. Wow the little things about clothes!

Okay another weird little thing. I can buy Guess jeans for guys in size 32 or 31. But when I buy them in girls clothes, I bought a size 28 today. Okay, that is weird. Same comapny, but different sizes for boys and girls. Hmmm.... Interesting.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Hello folks. Today is the 4th of July and I did next to nothing. I did go rafting down my local river but it was not fun today at all. Have you ever noticed how when you're unhappy fun things just aren't fun? Well that is basically what was going on today. So blah!

Okay I tried on two outfits today. It is the same skirt in both outfits with a different top. One of them the top is loose and over the skirt and the other is a tighter top with it tucked into the skirt. This skirt is one of my favorites ones as it is tight and stretchy. I like how it cuts in at my stomach and my knees. It really helps give the impression that I have hips, which is neat.

So those are my two outfits for today's requirement for the July challenge. Oh can you see my new pair of shoes? They are Guess, platform, and my tallest pair of heels. I am so darn tall with those shoes on. I got them at TJMax for about $32. What a steal!!! I tried them on and left them. Then for the next two days I thought and thought about those cute shoes. Eventually I had to go back and buy them. I mean really, Guess platform shoes that fit, are cute, and actually hurt my feet less than a lot of other shoes I own! Here is a closeup.