It's time for a new installment of Deadspin's college football rankings. As always, the teams are ranked according to the logic and values of college football, no matter how bizarre or contradictory they may be.

1. Alabama (1-0)Previous rank: 1

Still the champs.

2. USC (1-0)Previous rank: 2

The Trojans won by 39 and got demoted in the AP poll. Deadspin's rankings may be capricious—college football is capricious—but good gravy. One week ago, the AP voters believed USC was better than the defending national champions. Now, after one game, they've reversed it. What, they were surprised that Alabama won a home game? Why should everyone else pretend the AP poll means anything if the AP voters don't even believe in it?

3. [vacant]Previous rank: 3

When the national playoff comes, the question of who the third-best team in the country is will matter.