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May 09, 2017

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This article contains potential spoilers for anyone not caught up on the first 6 seasons of Game of Thrones.

There have been a lot of Game of Thrones fan theories over the seasons. Just last season, we had the much anticipated confirmation of the most famous GOT fan theory, which correctly predicted Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark as Jon Snow’s parents. For the upcoming season 7, which premieres July 16, there’s already a ton of theories making the internet rounds. But, here’s one theory that we think definitely has a strong chance of coming true: There’s gonna be f&%king dragons again.

Human on a dragon!

Fans of the show know that in previous seasons there have been f&%king dragons. Beautiful, deadly, flying f&%king dragons. Led by their mother, badass Queen Daenerys Targaryen, those dragons have been f&%king great. Every single time they’ve been on screen, f&%king great. Well, one time they killed an innocent child. But every other time, f&%king great.

But, unfortunately, while many of the human co-stars have confirmed their return, we are left to guess about whether or not there will be dragons again. That’s where this awesome fan theory comes into play.

Dragon breathing fire!

So, the theory, which is gaining momentum on Reddit and in plenty of fan forums, says that the dragons will be back again this next season. So is this the next R+L=J? Or one of the crazier ones that have no chance of happening? We for one think this theory has legs.

When last we saw those f&%king awesome dragons, they were crossing the narrow sea along with an enormous armada. Careful viewers will note that it did not show the dragons dying in this scene. So, as far as we know, there should still be dragons. And, you know what, there f&%king better be. If the very first scene of season 7 is an expository scene where Varys explains that all the dragons are dead now and will never be spoken of or seen again, a lot of people will be furious. Including us.

Barring that, or a sequence that shows that the dragons were always just a dream and there were never dragons at all, there should be dragons again. There really should be.

Dragon close-up!

For those of us who also read A Song of Ice and Fire, we know that the f&%king dragons have also been prominently featured in the novels. They first appeared at the end of book one and some of us even immediately began reading A Clash of Kings even though it was 3:30 in the f&%king morning to hear about those f&%king dragons again. And we had to sit through a REALLY weird blowjob scene and a lot of other words that weren’t about dragons until we got back to the dragons. But it was worth it.

So we really hope this theory holds water.

THAT BABY DRAGON IS SO F&%KING CUTE

Holy sh-t! Eggs! THIS IS WHERE THEY COME FROM!

Look at this f&%king guy. He knows there’s gonna be f&%king dragons this season.

Of course, since the show has now, more or less, surpassed the books in many of the plot lines, there’s always the chance George R.R. Martin plans to never mention the dragons again after book 5 so they won’t be on the show anymore either. In which case, his new name will be George F&%king R. F&%k R. F&%k Martin. Just kidding, his name will still be George R. R. Martin. But we won’t be happy with him.

Here’s why we think there will be dragons: Season 6 ended on a cliffhanger featuring the dragons. Every other season has featured dragons. The dragons are the best part of this amazing show. One of the show’s most interesting characters is called the Mother of F&%king Dragons. That’s a lot of evidence to support the idea that there will be dragons.

And here’s why you might doubt that there will be dragons: You have a dim view of the future. You are a sad person who doesn’t enjoy happiness.

The Pope talking about how there’s gonna be f&$king dragons. Well, he’s the pope so he didn’t curse. But that’s the gist of what he was saying.

I mean, seriously, who the f&%k doesn’t like those f&%king dragons? Even people who don’t like the show love the dragons. If you don’t, we don’t believe you exist. Prove to us you exist because we don’t f&%king believe you. Why are you lying to us about f&%king loving the dragons?! Either you love them, you’re lying, or you’re a demon sent from hell. There are no other options. Sorry, that was a brief aside to anyone reading this who doesn’t like dragons. Hopefully they’re gone now and are getting serious help. For the rest of us, let’s get back to this important theory. The idea that the new season, like the others, would again contain f&%king dragons was first floated on twitter by @iluvdragons:

This tweet definitely caught our eye and we have to agree. F&%k yeah! F&%king F&%k the F&%k yeah!

So sure, maybe also Lady Stoneheart will finally show up. Maybe Cersei will become a mad queen and be killed by Jaime or Tyrion. Maybe the White Walkers will find their way to Westeros. Maybe Tyrion will be revealed to be a Targaryen. Maybe The Hound and The Mountain will face off in brutal brotherly combat. Maybe Ser Jorah will be healed of his greyscale. Maybe Sansa and Jon will have to get married. Maybe Jon and Daenerys will meet. Maybe Littlefinger will die. Maybe Brienne and Tormund will hook up. Maybe the iron throne will be melted down because it contains enough Valyrian steel to defeat the White Walkers. Maybe Daenerys will add seventeen more titles to her name. Maybe Bran will travel back to 1955 and stop Marty McFly’s parents from falling in love. But, one thing’s for sure, there’s gonna be f&%king dragons again. And we can’t f&%king wait. Fuck.