The Progressive Bible: El Torre Del Babel

11:2 And it came to pass, as illegal immigrants were drawn to Obama’s paradise, that they found a plain in the land of Arizona; and they dwelt there.

11:3 And they said one to another, in their own language, Go to, take steel girders, and forge them thoroughly. And they had a beacon for transmitting, and coax had they for cable.

11:4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a television broadcast tower, whose top may reach unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we decide to illegally immigrate to other nations.

11:5 And Obama came down to see the city and the tower, which these illegal immigrants built.

11:6 And Obama said, Behold, we are a multicultural society, and it is xenophobic to have one language; and this these illegals begin to do: and now since they have successfully jumped the border they may demand of us what they please.

11:7 Go to, let us go down, and provide them with subsidized Spanish language teaching, that future Americans may not understand one another’s speech.

11:8 So Obama presented a huge cardboard check for the first shovel ready jobs: and these illegals set off to build the television tower.

11:9 Therefore is the name of it called Telemundo; and through it Obama did confound the language of future Americans: and from thence did Obama save or create three million jobs.