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Customer Service

Customer service people are great. Their entire job is to listen to people complain. Can you imagine that? All day long. Yet they always manage to sound so helpful.

I would be horrible at customer service.

Example number one:

Annoying customer: “Well, I gave my phone to my toddler to play with, and she was chewing on it, and now I can’t get it to turn on.”

Me: “Seriously, you let your toddler chew on your phone, and now it doesn’t work?!”

Annoying customer: “Yes. I think there must be a manufacturing defect.”

Me: “Right.”

Annoying customer: “So can you replace it for free?”

Me: “Sure! And while we’re at it, how about we replace the part of your brain that you think with. I think it has a manufacturing defect.”

Customer service people are saints.

Example number two:

Annoying customer: “I ordered a pair of pants, and they don’t fit.”

Me: “Did you receive a different size than you ordered?”

Annoying customer: “No. They just don’t fit.”

Me: “Did you order the right size?”

Annoying customer: “I ordered the size I wanted to be, and they don’t fit.”

Me: “What do you want me to do about it?”

Annoying customer: “I think your sizing is off.”

Me: “AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”

I would not be able to put up with that for 1 call, let alone all day!

Next time you call customer service, thank the person who has been putting up with people like you all day.

So, thank you Jimmy from Boden customer service. We had a very nice chat. Even the part where I said ‘thank you’ seven times hoping you’d get the message that I wanted to hang up. You see, you were too polite to hang up on. And you even tried to be helpful. I’m astonished how you can do that every single day. I hope you get a promotion soon.