Db Robocop Re-F'ing

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In defiance of the Aronofsky robocop, or perhaps simply instead of, I give you a synopsis of

Darth Bobs Robocop Re-F'ing (A work in progress)

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Film opens on a bank, several cars pull up, men in suits get out, putting on balaclava's picking up guns and storm the bank, taking everyone hostage, a defiant clerk presses the bank alarm, but gets a shotgun blast to the chest for his troubles.

Cut to a dark room, we hear radio chatter about the hiest, suddenly lights come on, and a siren wails, a police car burst forth and across town at high speed to the bank, out get several ordinary police officers and with tactical efficiency they dispatch the bank robbers with ease and no more loss of life, on screen the message appears

OCP: Police Force Protecting the public

we zoom out to a board room the Vice Chairman (Ron Perlmen) turns off the tv with a remote, he smiles and nods to the other members of the board, he mention
Aquisition of the police force (3 to 5 years prior), Loss of public confidence, increased mortality rate (thus increasing danger pay outs), and the decreasing police applications, and the failure of several Ocp employee's to rectify the situation, this leads to an argument with the Robocop project lead (uncast)

" what about the Robocop project?"

"I'd hardly call one cyborg a sucess"

"you talk about failures , but what about your ED-209 project?"

Gets up, mentions aquisition of the security dvd , boardroom chatter, the video starts up , we see several lab coated scientists, behind security glass, briefing an italian american (Joe Pesci or someone with similar voice) and is provided with a gun

Joe goes up to the ED - 209, and waves the gun in a threatening manner, and is told to drop the weapon by Ed, he does so, the Ed stands down the scientists tell him to come out of the room, Joe picks the gun back up

"You want this back?"

ED responds and shoots him and several scientists, tape ends, Ron shrugs and responds

"Well he did pick the gun back up".

End of Chapter 1.

Notes:
this would probably end the plot similarites to the original robocop, though keeping in with the tone and humour of the original.

Obviously this would take place post Robocop creation (it would be told in flashbacks ala Hulk, as Fans would be bored to tears waiting for Murphey to bite the dust, and newcomers need an origin)

Why Perlmen: mostly his voice. it's fantastic. and he's a great actor to boot.

Hi, Im Al gore the fourth, like my grandfather before me, and like the american public, Im just as concerned about the environment as you, but also like the american public, I like to drive fast sports cars,

*pause, nods at screen*

But until now I've never been able to reconcil my love of speed and caring for the environment, so I give you THE S U X ECO WARRIOR! the worlds first commercially produced solar powered sports car!

Now you too can drive fast and dangerously without worrying your destroying the environment! All day long , yes with solar power you can drive all day!

---Breaking news bulletin---

announcer: We interrupt this paid broadcast for some breaking news, we go live to the scene

-- switch to docks, gunfire screaming ect--
Reporter: welcome to detroit dockyards, which until a few minuets ago was a quiet and safe place to work, now it's become another battleground in the fight between the police and drug gangs for control of our beloved city

*cuts to a swat team moving for cover between typical dockyard scenary, just as there about to breach the warehouse door, it rolls open, manaic with a minigun opens fire killing/mortally wounding swat, laughing manically (cus that prooves he manical )*

reporter *ducking to avoid the minigun fire* more of our valient police officers cut down in the line of duty, is there no end to the violence and crime? is there no hope for out fair city ?

Reporter (standing up) : It seems that OCP's robocop has managed to restore order to chaos once again.... but with escalating violence and increasing crime, how can one man or machine hope to stem the tide? this is Tris *paperwight is thrown at the screen and it breaks, cut to ron perlman lookin severly pissed off*