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Sunday, June 20, 2010

A Daddy and a Daddy's Girl

There was once a little girl who was daddy's little princess. He was her prince charming. They would do things together. She uttered her first word while lying on his tummy. He brought and picked her up from school, sometimes even staying there, waiting for his little girl. They'd do things together as her mommy's super busy with work. Her favorite word was daddy and her world revolved around him. She even asked him, "Daddy, will you marry me when I get older?" which brought a huge smile on his face and even on her mom's.

The little girl then started growing up and wanted to know what's out there in the real world. But her daddy never allowed her to go out with her friends, even though she was already in high school. When she was 14, she once asked him, "Daddy, how come you never allow me to go out with my friends? The mall's just a few minutes away from here. I'm the only one who can't go malling with them." He simply told her, "Your mommy and I just want to spend all the time with you while we still can as you will eventually get older and would want to hang out with other people more than us." But she refused to understand what he said and became rebellious. She even said some mean things to her dad that broke his heart and made him say that she's no longer the same girl that he used to have, but still, he continued to love her as she is his child.

After a year, the daddy found out that he has cancer and was told that he only had 4 months left to live. When his daughter got home from school, the dad hugged her tight and started crying while he told her that he's sick. That's when she realized how wrong she was and she regret being a bad daughter. While he was under medication, they did their best to rebuild their relationship. She took care of him and prepared his medicines, served him breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He was finally doing better and lived beyond the 4 months he was told. Even though he was not allowed to have meat, he still cooked for her. And it was still delicious even though he never tasted it. He'd still wait for his daughter by the gate after school and would carry her bag for her as they go inside the house. They thought everything was going well for them.

Then the summer of May 2000 came. Everyone was busy for college applications. He was going to accompany her to get application forms for the UPCAT on 11 May. On the evening of 10 May, the whole family spent the evening playing cards and laughing their hearts out. It was kind of odd as he never played cards with them before. He doesn't like cards. The 11th of May came and he told his wife and his daughter that they'll go to UP on another day as he was having tummy pains. After the mom gave him meds, he told her to go to work as he'll be fine. During lunch, he asked his daughter to buy ice cream and they shared it.

It was already mid-afternoon when he told her to call his in-laws as he can no longer bear the pain in his tummy. They came and rushed him to the hospital. The daughter realized her dad was in so much pain as he kept bugging the doctors for pain killers but they won't give him any as the signs are not good. She felt utterly helpless as she cannot do anything to help ease the pain of the man who has protected her from all the pain out there all throughout her 15 years and has done everything to cheer her up when she's sad, made her smile on the days when she was feeling blue, and gave her the best hug that made her stop crying when she was hurt. She stayed beside him and told him to wait for her mommy as she is on her way to the hospital and he nodded. Then after an hour and a half, everyone started rushing to her dad's bed and tried to revive him. But it was too late. Her dad was gone. Then the mom came just as they proclaimed he was officially dead. Her world fell apart and she felt like a helpless little girl without her prince charming and uttered the words, "You said you'll never leave me" on his funeral.

After a couple of years, while fixing his things as they were preparing to move to another house, she saw a card that has her name on it. She opened it and found out that it was a card he wrote on her very first birthday. It even told her to read the card when she's old enough to understand. She was supposed to be named Paul as he was expecting to have a baby boy. Instead, he had a baby girl. On the card he wrote, "I was expecting a baby boy but when I first saw you and your smile, I told myself that you are my child and it no longer matters if you're a boy or a girl. I love you so much that my whole life would be nothing without you. I love you, child." And he spent 15 years loving her unconditionally.

It has been 10 years since my dad passed away and I terribly miss him. I once remember an interview where the interviewer asked me that if I have just one wish, what would I wish for. Of course, it's to have my dad once again. I had no intention of posting anything like this but someone at ym sent me a message with a happy father's day greeting and told me to go hug my dad. I told him that I'd give anything just to be able to once again hug my dad and feel the same comfort and love that I'll never ever feel in the arms of any other man. I used to hate this day as I thought it was so unfair that other girls get to celebrate this day with their dads and I can't. But you know what, my thinking has changed. I smile just by seeing little girls and their dads being sweet to each other. At least through that picture, I get to remember how my dad and I used to be and I'll never lose that image of him holding me.

So to all of you whose dads are still alive and kicking, spend all the time that you can with them as they won't forever be here with us. I so envy you. :)

I'm currently at work today and reading this post made me teary eyed. I tell you, I'm having a hard time controlling my tears. It would be too awkward to cry here. You're truly a Daddy's Girl. You're still lucky because not all daddies are as loving as your dad. Now I know why you love my Father's Day post. Let me give you a warm hug. *hugs*

^_^

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness but of power. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and of unspeakable love.- Washington IrvingYou cannot take credit for beauty at sixteen. But if you are beautiful at sixty, it will be your soul's own doing.

- Marie Stopes

Taking joy in living is a woman's best cosmetic.

- Rosalind Russell:)

“Beauty is about perception, not about make-up. I think the beginning of all beauty is knowing and liking oneself. You can't put on make-up, or dress yourself, or do you hair with any sort of fun or joy if you're doing it from a position of correction.”

― Kevyn Aucoin

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