June 2010

Ummm… not so much wordless, but it’s Wednesday and I’m posting a picture. 🙂

Photo by the wonderful Johnny.

We have a friend who has the same birthday as me… well actually I know two or three people who share my birthday (all in different years), but this is our newest friend with the same birthday, we met him after moving here and after Johnny started working at Walmart (they work together, and I worked the same shift as both of them for awhile too). So yesterday both Johnny and our friend had the night off (it was Johnny’s last night on vacation) and our friend and his fiancee were heading up to his Dad’s cabin in the local national forests and they invited us up for a bbq and some time out of town. They are spending the next few days camping there (they’ve got a tent set up by the river, they are actually camping even though the cabin is right there if they need to go inside) and we all thought it would be great for all of four of us to get out there, let the kids run around and get some time just hanging out. 🙂 We got a bit lost trying to find where we were going … long story, lots of reasons for it, it’s not on just one person that we ended up lost, I think there were 4 or 5 of us (adults) who played a role lol. So we were able to drive around in this beautiful national forest for awhile, before we ended up spotting our friend parked along the road on the way out so we could follow him back to the cabin. The above picture is the view from the porch of the cabin, where we sat and talked while the food was being bbqed. After we all ate (well, all meaning the four of us and our friend, as his fiancee slept most of the day since both she and our friend had worked all night the night before) we started grabbing fishing gear, using bug spray (biting flies are nasty creatures) and getting ready to walk down to the river and let the kids, Johnny and our friend fish. 🙂 Duckling tried for a few casts with Johnny, but (as is typical of our stubborn girl) got bored very quickly when she didn’t get her way by catching anything lol. Johnny fished a bit, Gamer fished for somewhere around 30 minutes to an hour, and our friend was fishing as well. No one caught anything, but it was nice just to be out of the house, out of the city, and out in the forest. Awhile later we headed back down into the city, but it was very nice to relax for part of the day up there. And I just had to share a picture of one of the views we had. 🙂

So … One of my … jinxes I suppose, one of the things I thought for sure if it happened I’d lose yet another pregnancy, was buying or being given baby clothing or items. A few friends and family members have given us baby things, one a couple of weeks after we found out, the others during my trip to visit family and pick up Duckling and Gamer. I was extremely scared when I got the package in the mail from the one friend, and a bit less scared when I was given the other clothes about two weeks ago. Today I caved and bought a cute outfit on clearance for $3. I’ve got a box of baby clothes going now. We’re still holding out for 12 weeks before we announce to anyone else, and we’re waiting until further than that (probably in the fall) before we really do any baby related shopping or do a registry or anything, but I couldn’t resist that little outfit today! I bought a size 3-6 months since I’m guessing we’re going to get lots of newborn sized clothes right away and it would be good to have a mix of sizes (though so far I have a good mix thankfully) so we don’t get through the first few months, then run out of clothes.

In other news, less than a week until my 25th birthday, and a week and a half (or so) until we announce the pregnancy! 😀 I honestly cannot believe we’ve made it this far with the pregnancy! According to the two ultrasounds I’ve had through the pregnancy, which have agreed on where I’m at in the pregnancy, I’m at 10 weeks and 5 days today! 🙂 This is over twice as long as I’ve ever made it before!!! The longest pregnancy before this was 5 weeks.

Eventually I’ll post about my latest OB/GYN appt, and about the trip I made and some other things, but I wanted to let everyone know that things are still good with the 6 of us (Johnny, me, Gamer, Duckling, Mischief, Littlest).. 🙂

This is such a weird place to be. To quote a blog post by Busted Kate “It was so easy for me to laugh at my infertility… yes, it was a lot of pain for so many years. But I felt comfortable there, I knew what to expect from it. I could have a sense of humor about it.
Now I’m in uncharted territory. And I feel like I’m a stranger in a strange land. I’m getting to the end of the first trimester–a landmark that I had almost convinced myself would never come. So why can’t I settle in? Why do I still feel like an Infertile in maternity clothing? ” … it’s an odd.. I almost want to say limbo, but I’m not quite sure that’s the right word. I’m pregnant right now, but I keep waiting for someone to tell me it was just a joke and I’m not pregnant anymore, I was just dreaming or something. I’m in such a strange place here… further than I’ve ever made it before… completely uncharted territory here. And I keep waiting for the same old thing (miscarriage) to happen again. Also, as much as I hate to say it, I was comfortable there, at least in that I knew what to expect. It wasn’t a comfortable place, most days I was crying over it rather than finding humor (though there was humor some days as well), but it was someplace where I knew what to expect. There is a part of me that is terrified and waiting for a miscarriage, and there is a part of me that wants to shoot to the world that I’m pregnant and everything is going to be alright this time. I go back and forth on which side is winning day to day. Today is a day where I’m split between the two pretty evenly… I’m happy and excited, but I’m also scared to get too excited. I will be 10 weeks on Monday… 5 weeks further than I’ve ever been before!!!! 😀 I am still in shock over having made it this far!
I just lost my train of thought so I’ll post more later, maybe on this topic, maybe a post to catch everyone up on how my trip went! 🙂 (And the ER visit, don’t worry everything is still fine… just needed to be checked!)

I will eventually do an update on my trip, on Littlest, on Johnny, and on Duckling and Gamer (or maybe a few posts?) but I am currently VERY tired from the trip, needing to be full time mom again (not that I’d trade it) and on a different sleep schedule, and the pregnancy. I’m getting ready to take my second nap of the day, as I didn’t sleep as long last night as I needed to, so as soon as I eat it’s nap time again.