New E-Mail, Messages, and Blog Comments Policy

I’ve got mail. Lots of mail. Which is awesome. I love hearing from readers and I love responding back. But if you’ve been following me for any length of time or if you’ve sent me an e-mail, social media private message, or blog comment requiring a teaching response from me, you know that finding the time to respond is a struggle for me.

I don’t discuss this frequently (because you’re here for content that will point you to God’s word and edify you in your walk, not to hear about me), but I do my best to keep my life priorities in a biblical order:

1. My personal relationship with Christ
2. Serving and ministering to my husband
3. Serving and ministering to my children
4. Being a faithful, active member of my church
5. Spending time with friends and loved ones
6. Everything else

I think the rightful place for any online ministry I do (blogging and responding to readers) is at #6, or sometimes further down the list if I feel like there’s something more urgent God wants me to attend to at the moment. God has blessed me with a husband and children, and my primary job is to minister to them.

This is the framework I try to work from every morning when I get up and begin to order my day. But, like Paul said, I know the right thing to do, I just don’t always do it. I was talking to my husband about this the other day, and I realized I’ve been blowing it lately. I’ve sinned against my family by not giving them the time they need from me. And that has to stop.

And one of the ways that’s going to stop is that I’m going to cut way back on responding to e-mails, private messages, and blog comments- probably by about 90%. I love y’all and I want to help each and every person who writes to me, but the amount of mail I get is just too overwhelming for me to be able to do that any more.

Also, I will not be responding to (and often, not publishing) blog comments which require more than five minutes of my time to answer. While I love hearing from readers, it is simply taking too much time to engage in long, in depth, or teaching conversations in the comments section of my articles.

However, I do want you to get the answers, information, and help you need, so I’m hoping these pointers will help:

Keep sending me mail.A lot of the stand-alone articles I write are in response to readers’ needs and questions, as well as trends I see in the church and evangelicalism. Even though I probably won’t be able to respond, help me stay aware of things like this by dropping me a quick note (evidentiary links to reputable sources are always helpful) and continuing to ask questions.

The Mailbag– I run a weekly (Mondays) feature on the blog called The Mailbag, the sole purpose of which is to answer readers’ questions. Keep an eye out to see if the question you’ve sent in has been answered. (As always, your anonymity will be protected.)

Click the hyperlinks. If you’re reading an article and see a word in a different color text that’s underlined when you hover over it, clicking on it will take you to another article or resource that will provide you with more information.

Use the search bar. I get lots of questions that could easily be answered by using the search bar and reading the article(s) I’ve already written on the subject. The search bar is located at the very bottom of every page of the blog.

Use the tabs at the top of the blog.(In the blue menu bar.) I’m often asked about teachers whose names appear under either the “Popular False Teachers” tab or the “Recommended Bible Teachers” tab. You’ll also find my statement of faith and answers to other commonly asked questions.

Read the Welcome- Start Here tab.I don’t publish every blog comment or respond to every message. Here’s why, as well as other information I’m often asked about.

Information on false teachersAgain, first use the tabs in the blue menu bar at the top of the page and the search bar. If you don’t find the person you’re looking for, please ask me. If I get enough inquiries about a particular teacher, ministry, etc., I’ll look into it and put the information in an article. If you need an immediate answer, please click here. These are the guidelines I use when researching teachers. I hope they’ll be helpful to you as you do your research.

Objecting to my warnings against false teachers While I understand how disconcerting it can be to see a warning against a celebrity Bible teacher you happen to love, please don’t waste your time commenting (it won’t be published), messaging, or e-mailing me to lambaste me for doing so. Your objection is not unique, clever, or biblical, and it answered in this article: Answering the Opposition: Responses to the Most Frequently Raised Discernment Objections. Additionally, please don’t attempt to manipulate or guilt me out of writing discernment articles by hand-wringingly telling me how sad, grieved, devastated, depressed, etc., you are to have discovered my blog.

Ask your pastor Or your Sunday School teacher, a trusted, godly friend, etc. Sometimes I receive questions about what to do in a catastrophic life circumstance, major situations at church, and so on. As much as I wish I could help with these things, I’m not equipped to do so via e-mail from thousands of miles away. These are situations in which you need to set up an appointment with your pastor for counseling, talk to one of your elders, or ask a godly friend to help you through. (Sometimes a certified biblical counselor is also an option.) This is just one of the dozens of reasons why it’s crucial to join and be an active member of a doctrinally sound local church. Your pastor, elders, and brothers and sisters in Christ in your church are there to help you.

If you need fellowship I often hear from ladies who say it’s hard to find Christian friends, or discerning friends, to talk to. I totally get that. It’s hard for me, too. The primary solution to that dilemma is to find the most doctrinally sound church you can, get involved, and go about the business of proactively investing in friendships. Have lunch. Go out for coffee. Find another lady to study the Bible or a good book with. Have another couple over for supper. Don’t expect pre-fab friends, make them. Secondarily, there are many excellent Facebook groups where you can discuss theology, personal issues, and make online friends. Here, here, and here are a few I’m familiar with.

I’m sorry I won’t be able to correspond as much from here on out, but please know you have my, and my family’s, thanks for understanding.

Sorry, Michelle, this response was intended for your Bible recommendation post – I’m new to WP and apparently I put this in the wrong place! Please know how grateful I am for that Bible recommendation article, which means a great deal to me. Thank you for the time you took to post it xx

Really good and thorough article and I agree with it all. As I have shared with you, I do not do FB (right now) and so those groups wouldn’t work for me. If anyone else knows of a discussion group that is not on FB, I would like to know about it, too. Perhaps, at some point, there might be a way to have a discussion community based on and attached to your blog. I don’t know how to do that, and I know you would have to approve it and have someone moderate and monitor it. Just a suggestion. Thanks for your ministry.

Robin- The discussion community is a good idea, the only thing is, you have to have an online platform for it (such as Facebook, Google+, etc.). I don’t believe WordPress has any sort of social interaction platform, but I will look into it when I get a chance. I know that Theology Gals (one of the “here” links in the article above) has a Facebook discussion group (in addition to their podcast), but I know it requires a lot of time for the admins to monitor, too.

I don’t know if you’d be amenable to Google+ or not, but one of the “here” links above is to a Google+ discussion group.

Robin, I too have been looking for an online discussion group and am not on and choose not to use Facebook. I do have a private online forum which is inactive at the moment but I can easily open it up again for this purpose. Any woman would be welcome to register and engage in respectful discussion there. Do you think something like this would interest you?

Sure Nicky. Perhaps that would help Michelle out not to have to moderate it and add one more thing to her already full schedule. Let’s hold off on doing this until Michelle has had time to look into adding a discussion board to her blog first.

Michelle, your priority list has helped me greatly. Thank you so much for sharing that. These things really matter and the gentle example of someone who has already navigated these waters is invaluable. May the Lord bless you richly for your faithfulness and obedience to Him, wisdom in prioritising your life Biblically, and your graciousness as a sister in Christ xx

I am so thankful for all of your great insight on people to be trusted concerning our Bible. I facilitate home Bible study and want to be very diligent in truth. I have been researching and sharing many of your recommendations. One that I looked into was The Outspoken TULIP. She referenced a few ladies that you have listed as false teachers which concerned me. Is this a new addition to her website? Trustworthy currently? I am so thankful that my daughter’s pastor recommended your website to her! Thank you for all your work.

Hi Diane- Thanks so much for your kind words. Could you provide me with a link to The Outspoken TULIP page that mentions the false teachers you’re talking about? Deb is very discerning, so I’d like to get some clarity. Thanks.

Dear Michelle,
I just wanted to send you an email to say a couple of “Thank You’s” for your blog and encourage you to continue on your courageous path that God has assigned to you….actually to all of us.
First thank you is for the ” how to find a good church.” I went on to look because my husband and myelf needed to get into a good and Biblically sound church after a 4 years at a church which we served faithfully and left for scriptural reason that were discussed with our Pastor and the church board. Anyways, I went on your site and actually found a Pastor that was an actual alumni from The Master’s Seminary and John MacArthur. Mind you we live in a small town in the middle of Wisconsin so this was a true blessing and we are so pleased to be going there now.
The second “thank you” is for the article that you wrote about Beth Moore and why she is not to be trusted for teaching anymore. I went online and did some more research on her and found more than enough evidence to convince me that she is not worthy of studying anymore.
Come to find out the new church that I just told you about……the one I told you I was so happy to be at?…..come to find out that the women from the church were going to a Beth Moore simulcast at another church.
So…..this is where my courage kicked in and when at church the next Sunday I quietly asked our Pastor if he had vetted Beth Moore lately because I could not go to her seminar. He asked why and I told him to just look into it and we could talk more if he wanted to then.
Not only did the women’s ministry cancel going to the Beth Moore seminar but the Pastor got up and from the pulpit and announced that he could no longer support Beth Moore ministries and she would not be taught at our church anymore!!!! One of the elders came and thanked my husband and myself for bringing this to their attention.
Thank you for your faithfulness on your blog. I appreciate you and wanted to let you know that what you are doing is important and has great benefit. Blessings on you and your family.

Robin, it is my greatest joy to be able to help women and their families find good, doctrinally sound churches where they can get plugged in, grow in Christ, and serve. I’m so happy for you! Give your pastor an extra hug for me and tell him thank you for his leadership on the Beth Moore thing. I’m so glad to hear of another pastor who faithfully stands for Scripture!

How can I know I am saved? I feel
Like this lady lost and religious . I don’t have a love for Jesus and feel like my life is for myself.
I have said the sinners prayer over and over again and am involved in church. Being a good person does not save me. It’s Jesus yet I feel
Cold and dead inside. What am I missing ? I am 34 and have always doubted my salvation since I was 15. Am I not one God elect ? How can I get a love for Jesus ? Why am I spitual blind still? How do
I really repent from the heart and not give God lip service ?
Michelle lok

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