"For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord..." Jeremiah 29:11

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Intuition - 1. Medical Professional Results - 0.

Well hello there weekend! So glad to finally see you again. I wish I could say the same for my frequent, unwelcome visitor, who happened to grace me with her presence Thursday. Yes, I'm referring to non-other than the b*@^h herself, Flo... ugh! (excuse my language) Not only does this mean the obvious, I'm not pregnant. This also confirms the suspicions I had in regard to my actual ovulation date. Allow me to refresh your memory, according to the ridiculously expensive medical testing (although covered by insurance... one of the only things that is) and their results, I ovulated the day of IUI, Cycle Day 17 and 11 days prior to Flo's arrival. Hmmm... that's 2 days earlier than when she should have arrived and while on progesterone, which is said to keep her away. I have also never had a luteal phase that short. (luteal phase is the period of time between ovulation and Flo's arrival.) According to MY calculations/feelings (non-scientific, nor medically confirmed, although...FREE) I ovulated on or about Cycle Day 15-ish (2 days prior to IUI) which would have given Flo an estimated arrival date of... oh... right about THURSDAY! Have I mentioned the chances of getting pregnant AFTER ovulation are slim to none and 2 days post ovulation is basically impossible. Well, in case I didn't, now you know. And have you ever had one of those moments when you think, "if ever there was a time I didn't want to be right, let it be now"? Well, I'm having one of those moments. Darn intuition.

Seeing as there is nothing I can do about changing the outcome of this cycle, but learn from it for future cycles, there is no point in dwelling on the negative. Right? Right! In fact, as you all know, I wasn't feeling too confident about this cycle anyway, so I'm chalking up Flo's early arrival as a blessing. At least I didn't have to wait for her for 14 days past IUI plus an additional 5 after stopping the progesterone.

I called Dr. D's office, (we're talking about the fertility doc this time, not the vet. It's a good thing I don't have them both in my phone as Dr. D. That might be a little embarrassing should I call the wrong one.) yesterday to schedule my cycle day 10 ultrasound and blood work and to ask about doing a medicated cycle this go around. My cycle day 10 U/S and BW is scheduled for next Saturday at 8:15am and I had to leave a message for Dr. D's nurse to discuss the rest. When his nurse called back she asked that I come into the office yesterday before 1pm for another ultrasound. That wasn't happening. I was working an hour away from their office and it was already noon. She was able to schedule me at 9am this morning. I'm kind of over spending my Saturday mornings at a doctor's office. At least I was out of there before my 10:30am yoga class. This ultrasound was needed to clear me for follicle stimulating medication. If any cysts showed, I would not be allowed to take anything for fear that the meds would cause the cysts to rupture. I was all clear and left with a script for meds. Don't go getting all excited now, the dosage is a joke and the drug is one I tried before without a positive result. He is putting me on Clomid, cycle days 3-7 at 25mg. I honestly, have never heard of anyone taking such a small dose. My OB/GYN put me on the same drug for 4 cycles at 50mg and an additional 2 cycles at 100mg. It did nothing, which is why I moved on to an RE to begin with.

As you probably already guessed, I'm a bit annoyed and frustrated, but not as annoyed and frustrated as I would be if this was a left ovary cycle. I don't know, yet, that it's not but it would appear I switch sides every other month pretty consistently. Last cycle was left, so this cycle should be right. This will give me a chance to schedule a follow-up consultation with Dr. D himself to find out why he is so apprehensive about being just a little more aggressive. It should also show that I need more than 25mg of a drug that did nothing for me before, to help generate more than just one follicle every cycle. I sound like a crazy drug addict begging the doc for MORE! I can assure you, the side effects of "more" can make PMS look like a cake walk so it's truly not something I'm looking forward to. Aside from the chances of the desired outcome being a bit better.

While on the subject of meds, I would like to take this opportunity to thank my cousin's wife for reaching out to me this week, probably when I needed her the most to prevent me from going completely insane. Unbeknownst to me, she and my cousin went through something similar to our experience not long ago. They now have a beautiful baby!!! YAY!!!! She offered to send me the left over meds she had from her last cycle (which was successful, obviously) and they arrived yesterday. Should Dr. D finally agree to me taking this medication, my cousin's wife's donation will have saved us about $500. Praise God!!! Now just as a disclaimer, people donate unused fertility drugs all the time. It's not illegal or dangerous or anything like that. We're not sharing needles or taking something without doctor's orders. A great big, huge, thank you to my cousin's wife (not sure she wants to be named so I would like to protect her anonymity). You are such a blessing, not only for the meds but also for your wealth of knowledge! You comforted me when I needed it most!

Another great big, huge thank you to every one who has sent their love and prayers. You have helped me get through some extremely tough days and I don't know how much more we could take, if it wasn't for your support! There is a lot of love in this house for each and every one of you!!! We're eternally grateful!

Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. Psalm 51: 10-12

My dang google reader wasn't showing me any of your posts and now I just got 6! :( So sorry this didn't happen how you'd hoped. You are in my prayers that God will bless you guys with a little miracle SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!