Monday, 31 December 2012

Happy New Year to all. Here's how I end 2012 and
start 2013, that is, to list down my fav quotes and try my utter best to live a
fraction of them up:-

1) "Feed the elephant; don't weigh the
elephant." For me it means to nurture relationship by cherishing and
giving and not judging and taking.

2) "I would rather carry a plastic bag with
$5000 inside, than to carry a Prada Bag with only $100 inside." For me it
means to be contented with what I have as a late philosopher once said,
"He forgets that to be without some of things you want is an indispensable
part of happiness."

3) "Idleness is not doing nothing. It is
being free to do anything." Life's tragedy is to end up being totally free
to achieve nothing. So, this 2013, I would like to live life, family and career
with a passion and passion is defined best by Einstein under the covers of
being a genius. He said this, "Genius is childhood recovered at
will." I want to have the curiosity, joy and the effervescent spirit of a
child and not the cynical, arrogant and begrudging spirit of an old man. It's
never too late to have a happy childhood, so they say.

4) "The only lies for which we are truly
punished are those we tell ourselves." I want to be true to myself. Walk
my talk and talk my walk. I want to live my life measured more by my deeds and
not by words.

5) "All men should strive to learn before
they die what they are running from, and to, and why." Sometimes I feel
like I am living a life escaping from one fear or dread to another. I lack
courage to face them so I run. But then I recall that courage is not the lack
of fear but it's about facing it. One author defines it this way: "Courage
is the willingness to act towards a moral or worthwhile goal despite the
presence of risk, uncertainty and fear." So, 2013 will be the year I step
up to the plate. And whenever my feet wobble and knees buckle, all psyched up
to run away, my heart will stand firm and allow God's spirit to whisper these
words, "Son, try overcoming it. Let fear run away this time, not you."

6) "In our infinite ignorance, we are all
equal." Humility is the operative word for 2013 and beyond. A friend of
Socrates once asked the Oracle of Delphi if there is any man wiser than
Socrates, and the reply was, "There is none." When Socrates was told
about this, he was puzzled. He eventually concluded that what the Oracle meant
was that true wisdom consists of knowing one's ignorance. I have learnt that
the moment you think you are better than others, someone or something will come
along and prove you dead wrong; sometimes even humiliatingly wrong. So, for me,
knowledge in servitude is humility but knowledge in attitude is stupidity.

7)
"The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are." Let me end with
this: "Every man has a vocation to be someone: but he must understand
clearly that in order to fulfill this vocation he can only be one person:
himself" (Thomas Merton). Cheers out for 2012!

Thursday, 20 December 2012

Doomsday cult?
Predicting the end of days on 21 Dec 2012? (which happens to be this Friday actually).
So much for the perky acronym "TGIF"! I guess the church is a
lighthouse in the sea of absurdity.

Honestly, if this
Friday is my last day on planet earth because some ancient Mayan calendar has
run out of paper, then this is my BUCKET list of things to do:-

1) Forgive thy
enemies. Currently, I can think of only one. It's that purple dinosaur called Barney.
"I forgive you, dude...from the heart."

2) Repent of all
transgression. Short of a confessional, this will take a few hours.

3) Honor my
parents. Maybe bring them out for a ride on the singapore flyer as we come full
circle together.

4) Romancing the
wife. Ahh...this is a bit private. It's for me to know and for you best not to
know.

5) Enjoy with the
family. Gather the children and wife together to talk heart to heart. It will
be a time full of hugs and kisses.

6) Give to charity.
Just reserve enough for the few days and give the rest to, say, children cancer
society. Ain't no earth maggot chomping off my meager material possession.

7) Friendship
renewal. Gather a handful of close friends and their spouses on the eve of eve
and have a hearty meal.

8) Do a dare. Maybe
a bungee or a sky dive or sit through a “Lord of the Ring” movie marathon just
for kicks (because god knows I am not exactly a LOTR fan, but after holidaying
in Port Dickson last week, I am more of a “Lord of the Ring-git” fan now).

10) Finally, this
last category is special. It's individual-specific. I call it “Leaving a Legacy”.
You fill in your own blank for this. For me, I might put a message in a bottle
for what it's worth and throw it into the ocean. The message will read:

"Never do
anything out of revenge. Instead do it out of love. It will not guarantee you a
long life but at least it will be a meaningful one."

So, come what may,
21 December 2012, I am ready for you (actually I have a few Christmas dinners planned on days after the end of days. So let’s hope that the Mayans are
dead wrong).

But wait a minute,
stop the mope float. Isn't my BUCKET list applicable to my life now whether the
end falls on Friday or not? Why do I need to wait for the imaginary end of the
world to fulfill them? Mmm....

I guess this leads to one reflection here as I
end: "Why can't we live our life with a sense of urgency without the
urgency?"

Cheers and see you on the other side of the
apocalyse this Christmas!

Oops, almost forgot…and have a “Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!”

Saturday, 15 December 2012

I have a confession to make. When I read about Michael
Palmer's resignation yesterday, I felt a waft of self-indignation. I asked
myself, almost knee-jerk, "how could he?" Then, almost immediately, I
was reminded of what Confucius once said, which I paraphrase here, "When
you see an upright man, emulate him. When you see a fallen man, examine your
heart."

As I read more about michael, I begin to identify with
him; that is, his follies, his foibles. I guess the only difference between
michael and I is opportunity (not to mention his good looks). Because of his
wide exposure, he was constantly tested. Even as a Christian, michael fell like
many great biblical giants before him.

Alas, while the father yearns for the prodigal son to
return for a banquet, politics and society sent him away with a postcard
farewell. I guess the sore reality is that you are only as good as your last
fall and nobody really remembers your best score.

One wise man asked, "Is the chain of marriage so
heavy that it requires two, sometimes three, persons to carry it?" I have
no doubt that michael loves his wife (an Oxford graduate who gave up her
promising law career to take care of their son). So, love is not the issue
here.

I think the greatest wrecker of marriage is not
falling out of love. There's nothing ironic about that. The enemy of love is in
fact routine. Routine is a silent killer. Like a rooftop sharpshooter, it waits
patiently for the headshot and pulls the trigger when one least expects
it.

Routine leads one to take what's important for
granted. And this leads to neglect, even inadvertently. It is like sleepwalking
off a cliff. When you have awakened, it is usually too late.

Routine is like an assassin who bid his time and waits
for it's fellow accomplice, opportunity, to set the stage for the kill. Without
time and opportunity, routine will fail miserably. Given the time and
opportunity, it attains a perfect score.

So, from this unfortunate episode, I've learned to
jealously guard my marriage. To treat it like a child, constantly requiring my
attention and care. A counselor once said that a marriage is like building
an edifice of your love on a daily basis. And when you are so consumed by this
love monument, you would have no time for other distractions.

So, this is the ultimate consummation of love: To fall
in love, over and over again, for a lifetime and with the same person.
Cheers.