WASHINGTON — Al Franken had it exactly right in his 1999 bestseller: Rush Limbaugh is a Big, Fat Idiot.

I’m sorry. That was insulting. I chose the wrong words and I certainly did not mean a personal attack on Mr. Limbaugh. It was an ill-considered attempt to be humorous, to illustrate the absurd with absurdity, and I sincerely apologize to Mr. Limbaugh.

He is most definitely not an idiot, just a mean-spirited boor who uses the tactics of a third-grade bully to denigrate anyone who doesn’t conform to his rigid world view.

Oops, I did it again. I’m really sorry this time. How hypocritical of me — demonizing Limbaugh in the language he uses to demonize others.

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I promise it won’t happen anymore and — at any rate — Limbaugh’s got enough problems without having another lamestream media hack getting all self-righteous on him.

Rush Limbaugh’s apology, March 3

For over 20 years, I have illustrated the absurd with absurdity, three hours a day, five days a week. In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke.

I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. I personally do not agree that American citizens should pay for these social activities. What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? If this is accepted as the norm, what will follow? Will we be debating if taxpayers should pay for new sneakers for all students that are interested in running to keep fit? In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone’s bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a presidential level.

My choice of words was not the best, and in the attempt to be humorous, I created a national stir. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices.

No doubt you’ve heard about poor Rush’s troubles by now. Seems the whole American nation — save Mitt Romney — has finally had enough of the bombastic right-wing talker and his poisonous rhetoric.

Limbaugh took the extraordinary step — for him — of issuing an apology on the weekend for an on-air attack against Sandra Fluke, a 30-year-old law student at Georgetown University in Washington.

Fluke became Limbaugh’s target for supporting an Obama administration policy that would have required religious-affiliated institutions — such as Georgetown, a Catholic university — to provide free health insurance coverage for birth control.

In Limbaugh’s mind, Fluke was a “slut” for favouring insurance coverage of contraceptives.

“It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex,” he said last Wednesday. As if not satisfied he had been offensive enough, Limbaugh went further the next day.

“So Miss Fluke, and the rest of you Femi-Nazis,” Limbaugh began. “Here’s the deal. If we are going to pay for your contraceptives, and thus pay for you to have sex, we want something for it. We want you to post the videos online so we can all watch.”

Apart from providing listeners with some creepy insight into his private-time habits, Limbaugh’s tirade also proved the last straw for several major advertisers who pay big money for exposure on the country’s most popular talk show.

Rush, being a man of principle, does not apologize willy nilly.

He emerged unscathed through his “the Clintons killed Vince Foster” conspiracy-theory phase in the 1990s. He survived mocking Michael J. Fox’s Parkinson’s symptoms in 2006. When he recently said Michelle Obama was disliked because of her “uppity-ism,” supporters shrugged off the affront to the first lady. Rush was just being Rush.

For Limbaugh to actually back down, you know the “slut” controversy must have hit him where it hurt most — his pocketbook.

“I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices,” he said.

But the long-term damage may already be done, not just to whatever shred of credibility he had as a proxy for U.S. conservatism, but to Republicans preparing for the fall election.

Even before Limbaugh went ballistic on Fluke, Republicans from Rick Santorum on the presidential trail to Sen. Roy Blunt in Congress had sought to exploit President Barack Obama’s policy making on the contraception issue.

The administration’s stirred outrage among Catholics with a rule requiring religious-based hospitals, charities and schools to provide — against their conscience — free contraception to employees.

A compromise proposed by Obama — that insurance companies provide contraception free outside of the religious employer’s coverage — has not mollified Catholic bishops. But it has satisfied other Catholic groups that were opposed to the initial policy.

Republicans, given some political rope by Obama, chose to hang themselves with it.

Senate Democrats last week blocked legislation proposed by Blunt, a Missouri Republican, that would have allowed any U.S. employer to deny contraceptive coverage by citing moral reasons.

By turning access to birth control into a political wedge issue, the GOP is in grave danger of entrenching the perception it is a party antagonistic to women’s health.

The Obama administration may have botched its initial contraception policy — creating unnecessary controversy when an obvious solution was available beforehand — but it is smart enough to recognize a political opportunity when it sees one.

The Democratic National Committee is already fundraising off Limbaugh’s comments. Obama telephoned Fluke to offer moral support after Limbaugh’s “inappropriate personal attack.”

John DeGioia, president of Georgetown University, described Limbaugh’s remarks about Fluke as “misogynistic” and “vitriolic.”

The response to Limbaugh among high-profile Republicans — who are typically beyond deferential to Rush — has varied.

“Insulting,” said Rep. Eric Cantor, the House majority leader.

“He is being absurd, but an entertainer can be absurd,” said Santorum.

“I think it was appropriate for Rush to apologize,” said Newt Gingrich.

Romney, alas, couldn’t even manage that.

Asked about the “slut” remark, the GOP front-runner dodged rather than denounce the high priest of conservative talk radio.

“I’ll just say this, which is, it’s not the language I would have used.”

In the wake of a Grammy Awards ceremony that disappointed many, from Kanye West to the masses on Twitter lamenting the state of pop music, a historical perspective is key. Few are better poised to offer one than Andy Kim.