Choosing Love Over Friendship

What happens when a friend makes you choose between her and the guy you really like? Would a real friend make you choose? And how do you know if you made the right decision?

I'm in grade 11 and this is one of the hardest years for me. I recently changed schools. I thought I had a very good set of friends at my new school. Ones that you can count on. There were few interested in drinking and drugs and no real rumors going on, yet. I became close friends with a girl named Jenn. I got to know her boyfriend - the one was dating at the time. I got to know every one of the crowd.

Six months went by. School was almost out again. Jenn broke up with her boyfriend and had dated a few others afterwards. I started liking her the ex from months before. The one that she had cheated on. People found out. The whole group, called friends, turned their backs on me. A few friends didn't care, but it turned ugly. I was called everything and anything. I was betrayed more than anything. I was asked to choose. It was either her or the guy. If I chose her, then I had to have nothing to do with the guy. I chose the guy. For a couple of reasons. Those friends that I had, spread rumors about each other all the time. It was one really bad soap opera.

I was sorry to hurt Jenn, real sorry. Yet how this guy made me feel was wonderful. I am the only girl in his world. I was thinking about friends. I thought about the future. The ones that would always be there for me and the ones that I could count on. In the long run, the guy proved to be there.

I wasn't about to give that up. I couldn't afford it. So therefore, I made a choice - one that left me without friends. However, I am happy. The few friends that I have now, I know will be there for me. They are the ones that I call true friends.

I know that life goes on. Friends will come and go. Those that stay, are the true ones. I want a family and to marry in the future. I learn to take one day at a time. Treat others how you want to be treated. This makes you a happier person.Kidz Submit By:Nickname: SuperwomanAge: 16

My bestfriend and I both liked the same guy, but after she found out someone else liked her she stopped liking my crush. But after she stopped liking him, he started liking her! I was depressed. But when I found out my friend got a boyfriend, I knew she wasn't going to go out with the guy I liked.Kidz Submit By:Nickname: munchkinkadoodlybobAge: 14

I honestly can say that I would not choose love over friendship. Friends don't come and go, you can't just stop being friends with some one and find another friend just like them. But with guys, that happens all the time. I never do that. But my best friend does it all the time. If her boyfriend calls her she'll hang up with me for him, or if I ask her to go somewhere with me and then he asks her, she'll go with him. I hate when she does that.Kidz Submit By:Nickname: Goody2shoes_89Age: 14

Well I think you shouldn't care what others think. You know you like him so go for it. If Jenn didn't want him no more so why should she care since she got her other boyfriend. I mean if a guy makes me happy, why should I leave that for a friend who should care about you and doesn't.Kidz Submit By:Nickname: GtownAZnBbgurlAge: 13

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Touche... I feel alone as well...
I hate myself...
People bully me for the stupidest of reasons, and it never ends!
It's the reason I came on here in the first place. To have people that I can consider friends with a straight face (I have a few of those in real life but I'm not exactly a social butterfly.
Well, I hate myself even more when I have to lie about not having friends, saying I have heaps of them, when that would be 35...
I'm sorry if I offended anyone, but hey, I just assume I offend everyone I talk to... which is why I don't talk much...

Ask your dad why he won't let you go.
If it's cost then offer to pay for it yourself if he won't pay and you don't want your friend to pay. If you don't have enough money right now ask your dad if you can pay him back over time by doing extra chores or something.
Also calmly explain that you really like the band and really would like to see them live.
Is your friend's mom or dad going with you? That might affect his decision if he's worried about your safety.

Everytime I ask my dad for something, its no. Yesterday I asked if I could go to the 5sos concert, he said no, and I asked why. He said there was no one to take me. My friend offered to take me, since she is going. I asked for money for the ticket, and he asked how much it was. I said it was $24, and he said that is too much and that he just bought me a phone yesterday. (my phone was an update, IT WAS 99 CENTS!) My friend then offered to pay for my ticket, and I told her I couldnt let her do it, she has bought me too many things already. WHat d0 i do? How do I convince my parents? It will be my first concert.

"Delancey" wrote:I'm sorry to hear this , but I think you should talk with your teachers. It's really annoying, and I guess you shouldn't care for whatever they say. You're pretty, you're beautiful in your own way. Um, I guess you should talk with teachers/adults about it and I know it'll be tough for you, but ignore what they say and just be you!