We all have days when things go wrong – some we can avoid
and others not. Today being Monday was
one of those mornings when I needed to get into work for an early client. I was there on time, but at 10 after the hour
she wasn’t. So texted, it had slipped
her mind, and we rescheduled.

So I came
home only to find that my key wouldn’t work in the front door lock. This lock has been sticky and odd for a while,
and it seems to decide on a whim to allow a key to work or not. I had left through that door using the same
key, but it decided not to work when I got home. Around to the side door I went and let
myself in to deal with the other little tragedies of the morning.

My computer has been particularly pesky, seizing
all the time, so that was my morning challenge to resolve.
I actually think I had it figured out by lunchtime when I
had to go back to the office for my next client. So out the front door I went, putting my key
in the lock, locking the door, only to find that the lock doesn’t want to let
go of the key – it obviously likes it now!

What to do? I couldn’t leave the house unlocked with a key in the
lock, because it was a rather bold opportunity for someone to come in and steal
us blind. And now I am waiting for the locksmith to remove the key
from the lock before my evening client. Somehow, my computer seems to be up and
working enough to get email, and a friend who also has been having similarly
bizarre problems today said perhaps Mercury is in retrograde. Supposedly when that happens one just has to
go with the flow and not get too frustrated because things are happening to
everyone. Well, it isn’t in retrograde
until the end of June so I don’t have that for an excuse.

What is important here? Things happen that get in the way
during our daily lives. If they happen
to trigger a memory or emotion from the past, we can find ourselves making
things all the worse for ourselves. For
example, if I were to have allowed myself to blame myself for my client not
showing up this morning – after all I usually text her reminders but didn’t
yesterday – then I could have started the morning out blaming me and feeling
bad. This then could have continued into
my adventures with the faulty lock and key. I could be very upset and agitated
by the situation, which would have caused me to become more careless in dealing
with the lock and might have caused me to break off the key. At this point it is a maybe whether there
needs to be a new lock, but that would definitely have caused it. So instead of
shutting down, I reached out for help.

Were all my decisions today good decisions? Maybe yes and maybe no; but the point is
that I also didn’t spend any time blaming me for something beyond my control.
So what makes the difference for you between an event that
is an annoyance one day and tragedy the next?
Much of it is our own attitude and our sense of grounding and stability
in ourselves. If one is fully grounded
and centered, life situations may be unpleasant but resolvable. When one isn’t, it is easy to encounter
emotional turmoil. Why is this so? When
we are ungrounded, our inner selves relate to other times when we felt the way
we feel in that moment. If I had felt
that I was stupid for having the key stick in the lock, I would likely have
linked in to a time in my past when I felt stupid and vulnerable. That would have increased my sense of
vulnerability today, and I would likely have become further ungrounded.

Give yourself a break.
If you are beginning to feel overwhelmed by annoying events, take a
moment and center and ground yourself before acting. That little break can give
you space to center yourself, recognize any emotional ties to the past that
might get in your way, and breathe. Once grounded allow yourself to acknowledge
emotions you are feeling so you are aware and awake. Sometimes the simple act
of acknowledging fear or anger or anxiety can allow some of the tension to
release and move you out of a fight or flight response. And when you are out of
that reactive mode, you are then able to think again.

We all have things happen that seem to be piling up on
purpose to give us a bad day. However, if you stop and think and ground, you
will see that the only thing that has happened many times is the event itself,
and everything else is the same. I am
the one who can control my emotional response, and I always have the choice of
whether to react or respond - even if my lower self doesn’t always choose
wisely.