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The Banana Splits Movie – Anuddercast Review

The Banana Splits Movie – Anuddercast Review

This is one of those moments when your pal Joe takes a hit so you don’t have to. I waste one hour and twenty nine minutes of my life so that I can tell you that there are a myriad of better ways to spend that amount of time in yours.

If you’re around my age, you grew up watching ‘The Banana Splits’ while shoving Fluffernutter sandwiches into your talk-hole and washing it down with Kool-Aid…the full blown sugar fueled Red Dye #5 kind.This wasn’t top shelf entertainment by any stretch of the imagination, but it was 1970’s brand childhood entertainment at it’s finest.So when you heard there was going to be a ‘The Banana Splits’ movie, you probably thought “Oh no. This is going to be terrible.”.Let’s face it, no matter how nostalgic we are for certain things, they often are held in higher regard in our memories than they would be in reality, should we revisit them.

‘The Banana Splits’ certain falls into that category.

Oh, but what’s that Hollywood? This is going to be an R-Rated horror film with the Splits we knew and loved now existing as homicidal maniacs?Well that sounds…completely fucked up and ridiculous…yet strangely interesting! I’d even go so far as to say if you do this right Hollywood, you could have a cult masterpiece on your hands!

Well…I’m here to tell you that Hollywood didn’t do it right.They don’t have a cult masterpiece on their hands.They have a steaming pile of shit that essentially pisses all over your nostalgia.

The whole time I couldn’t help but think of all the other ways in which ‘The Banana Splits’ could have been creepier and more fun, had they really committed to the premise and stuck the landing.Instead, we’re treated to something that’s just a mess from top to bottom. If this idea and script weren’t conceived and executed over a drunken weekend; if this was something that any real amount of time was spent on, then I could probably work as a screen writer too.Hell, so could the homeless guy that you’ve seen talking to a pigeon about bases on the moon.

Just stay away from this mess.Let ‘The Splits’ live properly where they belong…in your memories.

Anudder Joe

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