Where White People Make the Difference

Lime Pie

Here’s a dessert. It’s easy, cheap, and it tastes great. It’s common lime pie. Common limes are Persian limes, so it could be Persian lime pie too. Unless you have key limes (and unless you live in the Florida Keys, you almost surely do not), then it’s the better known key lime pie.Here’s how to make it:

Action: Zest the limes until you have a few teaspoons. Mix these in bowl with the four egg yolks. Then mix in the milk and the juice of 3 limes. Set aside to firm. Make the crust by crumbling 10-12 graham crackers, mix in a little sugar and half stick melted butter. Stir it up until it’s all coated and sticky, then form the crust in the bowl on bottom and sides, bake it 15 mins to make it slightly browned and firmer. Let cool. When cooled, and filling set, pour filling in pie dish, bake 350 for maybe 15 mins, till firmish in center. Take out, let cool, chill in refrigerator for three hours. Eat with Cool Whip topping or not.

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11 thoughts on “Lime Pie”

You need about half cup (4 oz) of lime juice, which can be got from two ordinary limes. I like lime pie limier than some, so I use three limes. That’s three bezus. There are no cops, yet, watching how many limes you use in your pie. I was able to purchase multiple limes from Hy-Vee on a Friday night in November 2011 without being asked to produce ID.

Can’t say I’m a fan of limes or lemons. Although I wish they’d made a lime starburst as opposed to a lemon. Limes are like a rehabilitated lemon, a little more suited for sweets. Lemons are for cleaning floors. They are not for taking up space in packages of Starbursts, decieving people into thinking that they are buying a whole container of something good to eat. A quarter of it is not. If there is any justice, the backwards confectioner who introduced Lemons into candy died horribly.

Ha…well…there’s no accounting for taste; I like most citrus, both lime and lemon are good. In fact, since you mentioned it, I think I will make this recipe with lemons next time, just to see. The beautiful thing about cookery is there’s no wrong way to do it if it comes out tasting good. I have a few other simple recipes I will post as we move forward, but no mistake, this will ne’er become a cooking blog.

“You really want me to believe that you eat the yellow starbursts? I refuse to believe it. I hold you in too high esteem.”

Not a candy guy, James. I really eat little candry or pastry, just don’t like it much. I like lime pie and one kind of cheesecake, but in general I stay away from that stuff, it’s just too sweet I find as an adult. But I’m afraid if I were proffered a lemon Starburst I would indeed accept it and greedily suckle it into nonexistence.. In general I do like lemon as a flavor, so we differ there. I attribute no greater meaning to it. I do appreciate idiosyncrasies, though. For example, I do not wear shirts with lettering on them, except inside out. Unless I deliberately intend to advertise the entity in question, or it communicates something that needs to be communicated (my status at the gas station; my team number, etc.).

@Lewpus Sucks: It was a restart post, just to see how it took. Besides health problems and the DCMA thing, I quit posting out of disgust at the general suckiness of wordpress, which is somewhat alleviated years later.

Anyway, lime pie you buy is a very different creature from lime pie you make with lust and lemons. A lime pie made with lemons is a like a concentration camp without jews. The tartness is missing. Frozen ice-cream lime pie is not key lime pie, it’s high-priced ice-creamlike carbs in a pieish shell. An actual lime pie is very cheap. In fact, I have subsequently discovered that you can obtain the key ingredient, sweetened, condensed milk, from Dollar General, where it is cheapest of all, not much more than a dollar per can. So…why spend $5 to buy a fake lime ice-cream pie when you can make one yourself for maybe half that price, and it’s tastier?

To complete the pie story… So, I made two lime pies. Then, for the third, I substituted lemons, with only one lime. It tasted ok, but not as tart as with the limes. Lemon doesn’t have the edge the lime does, and the edge makes the pie.

Oh, and for those who fear, I will be adding new recipes as I test and perfect them. In the time I was laid lowest, I had so little energy that I couldn’t even watch tv or read, believe it or not. I started cooking to stay calm and try to recuperate slowly. Never had any interest in cooking or food; now I’m somewhat interested in it, cooking at least. I do not cook obscure things, like boots or exotic roots, or three-toed sloth snoots. I cook normal stuff supernormally. If I can’t do it a little better or differently in a worthwhile way, I will not add to recipe pollution on the internet, rest you assured.

@Lewpus. my ‘thing’ aint diet related as best i can figure. perhaps some time i’ll write up my experiences with ‘ulcerative colitis.’ but it’s an ongoing thing, the story is not over yet. the mainstream view is it is not diet related. i know nothing to dispute this claim, and i have gone a ways to test it, but it just does not seem to be related to diet from my own experience. now, if you search the net you’ll find various people claiming that you can ‘cure’ this ailment by, as you mention, switching your diet, generally to a primal or all-raw-vegetable diet. but the people claiming this are always grown men who are 5’7″ and 130 pounds. that makes me doubt their claims. that and the fact they’re always selling a book and usually associated with mfts of various expensive vitamins and supplements.

i can honestly say that, for me, separating truth from fiction in matters related to diet and nutrition is the hardest thing ive ever come across. it is 100x more difficult than analyzing politics. no matter what the ailment, there is someone on the internet advocating a diet or pill or 100 other ways to cure it. maybe it’s not that solid information is so hard to winnow out, like gold, but that no two people’s bodies are exactly the same so you can’t immediately find which ‘solution’ to use yourself.

i go by the general rules that more you can avoid drugs of any kind, the better. as they say, if it’s strong enough to help you, it’s stong enough to hurt you. i think that’s a solid general principle. there’s something about eating a bunch of pills each day that makes you feel like a decrepit old man, and if you need to feel healthy and strong to have the spiritual brio to wage your wars, pills work against that. but that’s not an absolute, just a general principle, and my way of looking at things. yeah, i could try a raw diet or gluten free but honestly i dont want to. i dont think it would make much difference and frankly id rather die than eat all raw vegetables. i like vegetables, but i like meat too and more, and i just dont want to live the horror of eating only vegetables and not even cooked one. if my way of being worked for 41 years, and i have always been athletic and not fat, then i’m going to guess the MDs really are right – it’s just some combo of genes-environment-immune system that they dont fully understand rather than a dietary problem. there may well be benefits to raw/primal/no-carb diets, but i dont think they are going to cure serious ailments. my belief is like florence king’s; she used to write about how low class it was to be always worried and talking about health, and that’s very much my view. i’m digusted with obesity in the midwest. i think people should have enough pride to maintain some kind of shape. i dont care if you’re descended from thick-thighed peasants, as most of us are, you can still keep some shape. it’s the same with obscene t-shirts, getting metal poked through your nips, clits, brows and lips – wtf is wrong with you? bunch of brain-dead idiots who copy what you think is trendy brainlessly. guess what: taste, learning, sophistication, manners – these things are free but difficult to achieve, hence worth something. that disk stuck your ear is just stupid.

but yeah, maybe i’ve not written on it in here, but i’ve read atkins, the late, and i think he was right, and i dont think it’s a matter of opinion. the problem is carbs, not fat or calories. basically it is better to eat meat and some non-starch vegetables, and lay off the boxed shit that is the middle 80% of most supermarkets.

The all-raw vegetable diet is extreme. I would reject that too as well as anybody peddling their own vitamins, supplements, etc. (The Body for Life diet, which used to be much more popular than it is now, fits that description.)

I don’t see anything wrong with taking what works for you or what you like out of the primal movement, though. You can buy Mark Sisson’s latest book used through Amazon, and his blog is free.

My aunt suffers from ischemic colitis. About every three weeks she used to get a horrific pain and then pass out with bloody stools about half the time. What seemed to link all the mainstream information was slight or significant dehydration. Now she drinks about four glasses a water per day, and this year has only had two episodes (which I think were more stress related than anything else). Not saying that will work for you, but getting at least a little more water can’t hurt.