I was conversing with someone this week that commented that a lot of people who are in our age bracket are mindlessly moving through their life wondering if this is how it is supposed to be and wishing for something better. In a bit of a rant she asked “But what is it that’s better and what is the cost? We have gotten comfortably numb in our so called safe modes and what we have created around us. There are shackles of doing the right thing, the expectations of others we have allowed to place on us and the big fear of breaking out or even worse, looking up and realizing this is it. If we are holding all those things up, how can we ever let them down? It sure would be nice just to ….. exhale.”

Sound familiar?

In 2008, I had life pretty good. I was running my own IT company that I had started with a business partner in 2005, we were hoping it would take off and make us lots of money. And when it wasn’t, I started really doubting myself. My inside voice (my Inner Fiend) kept calling me a loser, told me the company wasn’t succeeding because I wasn’t good enough. My business partner kept talking to me as if our lack of success was all because of me and I wasn’t being successful selling enough. In hindsight, I realize that he wasn’t really talking to me that way, but that is how I was interpreting it. I was responsible for all the failures. I never stood up for myself, I just kept trekking along hoping things would improve, but they never really did. And then I got sick, with rheumatoid arthritis.

Since then I’ve been on a hell of a journey and if I knew then what I know now, I’m pretty sure I never would have gotten sick. But getting sick was a huge wake-up call for me. If I hadn’t gotten sick, I wouldn’t know what I know now and I wouldn’t be living how I’m living now.

Over the past year and a half, I have constantly been searching for answers to the root cause of dis-ease, and since my disease is an autoimmune condition I have focused more of my readings in that area. The consistent theme that is resonating with me is that the impact of our thoughts has a strong correlation with autoimmune condition. In an autoimmune condition (rheumatoid arthritis, multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, vitiligo, lupus, thyroid condition, etc.), the body is literally attacking itself. The immune system slips into overdrive and attacks the body from within, resulting in an autoimmune disorder. But why? While the medical community still doesn’t really know the answer to that question, there have been many studies that have shown a tie in between our thoughts and the resulting condition.

Have you ever paused to think about your limiting beliefs? Many of us have the same ones. I’m not good enough, I’m not lovable, if I say what’s on my mind I might offend someone, I’m not worthy, it’s all my fault, I’m going to fail, if I don’t do something perfectly I’ll be criticized for it. The list goes on and on. You probably have a few of your own that resonate with you. Maybe you have mommy issues, or daddy issues, or abandonment issues. We all have them. The more I read, the more this tie in makes sense to me, especially with autoimmune conditions. If I was walking around all the time thinking that I wasn’t good enough, it was all my fault, and I was a failure, then I was literally beating myself up on the inside. It also makes all the sense in the world to me that my body would respond in kind and start beating itself up. And in my humble opinion, that’s exactly where my autoimmune condition came from.

I’ve spent a lot of time over the past year talking to people about limiting beliefs and helping people realize that the beliefs we have really exist only in our own minds. I don’t know anyone else out there that’s telling me that I’m not lovable, I’m a loser, and it’s all my fault. Nope, it’s just me.

So a couple other thoughts have started to show up in a recurring fashion:

Is there a correlation between our limiting beliefs, stress and other types of disease like cancer and heart conditions?

If we could understand and shed our limiting beliefs, would we be less likely to develop disease in the first place?

Even after we develop disease, could we shed our limiting beliefs and have the body return to a condition where it could start to heal itself?

The good news is that there is scientific evidence showing a possibility that all of these things could be true. But you know what, I don’t give a rat’s ass about the scientific evidence. I’m glad it’s there and people that want to look at the scientific side of things can do so, but I just want to be happy. And I want to live every day of my life such that if I were to go tomorrow, I’d have no regrets. There wouldn’t be anything I looked back on wishing I had tried but never got around to it. What I do recognize is that when I’m happy and doing what I’m supposed to be doing, and I’m not beating myself up, then life is really good.

One of the recurring thoughts I have now is “Healer, heal thyself.” And I’m doing the work. And you know what I think of myself now? I am good enough. I’m not a loser. I don’t doubt myself. I’m not responsible for everything around me. That doesn’t mean that fear doesn’t slip in every once in a while and ask me if I’m sure, but I’ve learned how to work with those thoughts.

I’ve also started to get very bold and I want to do something that really makes a difference. My last blog suggested that the possibility of eradicating disease was just around the corner. And I’m sticking to that. And I’m telling anyone that will listen. I’m issuing a Wake Up Call for people to shed their limiting beliefs and start STEPping into their own greatness. I will be encouraging people to recognize what’s going on in their lives that is eating away at them, and to start dealing with those things now before they get the big wake-up call. I wish I had received this wake-up call before my disease gave me a big wake-up call. Having said that, my big wake up call could have been a lot worse.

Everybody is good enough, everybody is perfect the way they are, but not everybody has taken the time to appreciate their own true value. Many are way more worried about the things they can’t do, or how they think they have to take responsibility for other people’s shi+ show. And as soon as people start to realize that they need to take care of themselves first, they can then truly start to STEP into their own greatness. It’s amazing how when they do this, the Universe steps in to help.

“Once we slice away the muddle obscuring our own value, we will have the time.”

“The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself.” (Mark Caine).

Back to that rant from my colleague, I think I’ve answered the question. And now I think I’ll simply ….. exhale.

One Response to The Wake-Up Call Before the Wake-Up Call

Ken, I’ve been enjoying your blog and your ideas. I’ve been having similar conversations with myself lately. I think I create my own stress with my thoughts. I have to do this and I have to do that and my clients are so demanding and there’s no way I’m going to get it all done, etc etc etc…

Now I’m working on changing the way I think with a Buddhist philosophy. Nothing remains the same and everything changes. It all passes and moves on so don’t let it stress me. Clients come and go and that’s just how life works.

I’m also starting to put limits on what I do. Yes, I can do that, but I really don’t like it so I’m not going to do that anymore. I need to have more focus and be good at a few things. I find when I try to do too much in my business, I become paralyzed and that’s not a good thing.