Random crap I think about. Important Disclaimer: Posts are for entertainment or amusement only. Posts do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of the writer. Cannot guarantee the accuracy or factual nature of anything on this blog. Do not taunt Blog.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Absurd Rhetorical Trivia

Occasionally, I have bizarre questions that pop in to my head. And honestly, they are usually pretty morbid or juvenile. Like, I'll be standing in line somewhere and as I do some people watching, I think, "I wonder who in this room will be the next to die?"Or maybe something like, "How many people in that neighborhood are having sex RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT?!?!?"

There are many variations, but those are good family friendly examples.

It's pretty well established that my mind is a frightening place. Frightening not just in the "dark" sense, but also in an absurd, insane way.

"Ignoring food and water needs, if I was in a sealed room, what combination of plants would I need to sustain me with oxygen while being able to survive on the carbon dioxide I produce?"

"Is there, somewhere on Earth, still a store that has original Star Wars action figures still in the packages for sale because nobody that shops there cares about them?"

So, today, I had a real doozy:

"I wonder where the shoe is that holds the current record for most deaths caused by a shoe?"

But then, I had to kind of break it apart between "direct" (the shoe itself was somehow used on the person killed, like kicking, stomping, Soviet Hammering, Presidential Projectiles) and "indirect" (foot used to kick a soccer ball at somebody's head, gas pedal on a car that runs somebody over).