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HE SAID
Very, very nice profile. I think we have a few things in common. I like Kafka’s writings especially In the Penal Colony, the Metamorphosis and one short story about strange people in a roadside ditch. Forget the title.

I loved how you described your love of cooking and how it’s your art. I can definitely resonate with that, not the cooking, but the passion. I love to paint, draw and write. Very surreal work. But I do love good food very much so and believe it is a definite art. Even though I’m vegetarian, I don’t preach about it nor does someone who eats meat around me bother me in the least. I think people should eat what they want. What are some of your favorite dishes to cook?

I too am a huge Iggy Pop fan, especially when he was in the Stooges. But he has a some great solo albums as well. Ever see him live? Such amazing energy.

Many of your favorite things are some of my faves too: crackling fire, nutella (god so good!), oak trees, first kisses, coffee in bed etc. I would personally add to that: chimney smoke on a cold autumn evening, the smell of fresh basil, hot showers, walking in the rain etc. Yeah, I’m a bit of a romantic

Ok, on that note…take care. Hope to hear from you.

SHE SAID
Iggy? Let’s talk about John Foxx! I love(ed) John Foxx back in the day – no one knows who he is – and it almost makes me wonder if our paths haven’t crossed during our youth.

I’m sitting here, in the Seattle Airport, on one of those airport pletherette ( my new word) chairs waiting for my flight home. I wish I could say this waiting creates the perfect canvas for a creative email in response to yours, but my surroundings are bereft of inspiration.

Penal Colony is one of my favorites and, well, Gregor Samsa and Metamorphosis introduced me to Kafka, so it will always be close to my heart, but I don’t think I’ve read about roadside ditch people – I must seek it out. Please let me know if you remember the name.

I would love to hear from you again – please do write back if you’d like.

HE SAID
Ah yes, John Foxx. His solo album Metamatic is excellent. In fact I like it better than his stuff with Ultravox. It’s a wonderful, cold, visual album. It’s on my iPhone right now in fact! ha! It’s funny how much another of my fave musicians, Gary Numan, took from him. Numan has actually said Ultravox was a big big influence on him. God, I love music.

So you were in Seattle. Business or pleasure? I hope your trip went well regardless. I always find airports to be excellent places for “people-watching”. I’ve seen soooo many characters during my times waiting in terminals. I’ve also filled up many sketchbooks with art while waiting.

Yeah, I’ll have to track down that Kafka short story. It had an impact on me. It was deeply atmospheric. I’m drawn to atmosphere in writing or art or film very very much so. Another of his stories that I love is The Hunger Artist. I think Kafka wrote that–it’s about a “thin-man” in a carnival from what I can remember. I love to read and write 🙂 How about you? Do you do any creative writing? I can tell that you already have a way with words.

I love Metamatic, too. I never realized Gary Numan credited John Foxx for his work. I always thought he was heavily influenced by his early stuff. I was looking at my vinyl the other day, trying to determine how best to sell it (sob!) , when I came across a 12” Gary Numan (with Bill Sharpe) called “Change Your Mind.” While doing a quick online search to determine its value (not much), I found the video on YouTube. If you don’t know it….I highly recommend you watch it. It was cutting edge at the time – oh, those dot matrix printers! Regarding Ultravox, I’m a full-fledged Midge Ure fan. (God, I wish I was as in-tune – pun intended – about music in 2015 as I am about the 80’s).

So, you write, paint, drawn…is one a profession and the other two hobbies or all hobbies or ??? If you could only do one, which would you choose? What do you like to write?

HE SAID
Ok. You are an amazing writer! Your tale of Mr. Poka-Dot Sock Guy was hilarious!!! I loved the line, “he OJ Simpsoned through the terminal”. HA! Genius and so damn funny 🙂 But wow, what an adventure. I think you did the right thing so I wouldn’t worry about your traveling karma points. His socks, oh Jesus, so funny! So surreal. Your experience sounds like something that would happen to me. Seriously, I think my life is one long David Lynch film. That is of course both awesome and scary but oh well. I wish you could’ve taken a pic of his socks. It’s like you found some strange mythological species out in the wild. Heh.

Ah so for your question about whether or not I write/paint/make art as a profession. Nope would be the answer. The notion of being a starving artist, especially with the work I do, holds very true for me. And that’s ok. I don’t make art for others or for money. I make it because I enjoy the process and exploring different sides of myself and how I see things. Thankfully I have a full-time 40 hours a week job. I’m lucky to have a job in this economic climate so I’m not gonna complain especially since my life-path to this point has been anything but linear.

As for the type of stuff I write: it comes down to two areas. 1. poetry and 2. novels. In terms of subject it’s all very heavily atmospheric and surreal stuff. I wrote a small poetry book about the atmosphere of autumn. Specifically, for that project, many of the themes dealt with ideas concerning small spooky coastal towns, chimney smoke, secret meetings inside sleazy motel rooms, night drives through old neighborhoods, ancient Victorian houses, ghosts, people going missing etc. etc. It was a fun project. I’m currently working on a first draft for a strange, I suppose existential horror novel, that’s both erotic in parts and deeply disturbing in others.

All of these themes can also be seen in my drawings, collages and paintings. If you’re mildly curious to see some of my art, my Tumblr site is: xxxxxx. It’s very strange stuff, but I make no apologies for it even though it’s not everyone’s cup o’ tea. That’s ok. I just love doing the work.

It would be difficult to choose just one passion to do be it either art or writing. Each is so damn unique. And I can do things in art that I can’t in writing and vice versa. I guess I’d choose visual art. Tough choice.
Anyways, enough of my babbling. How has your day been? Are you re-cooperating from your trip? I always find that I sometimes need a vacation from when a trip/vacation is over 🙂 Tell me more about yourself. Anything random 🙂

SHE SAID
Thank you for the compliment but, I really don’t deem myself a writer. I have friends who are Writers (capital W) and I consider myself more of a dabbler – in most pursuits. My use of the term “dabbler” frustrates a friend greatly. He says I should either do something or not do something and he finds dabbling apathetic. At least I’m resolute in my apathy.

I’d prefer to play rather than focus. Technically, I’m a classically-trained Chef, but I would never use that term. In addition, I write about and photograph my food, but I don’t consider myself a food writer or photographer. I see stuff on LifeandThyme and realize how far I have to go to produce my vision. At one point, I took a ceramics class to make my own bowls/plates, but never became serious about it. It was fun to play with mud. I’ll probably pick it up again at some point, although never earnestly.

I checked out your Tumblr site. I’m a huge fan of German Expressionism as well as of Francis Bacon, so the fact that you stuff isn’t classically pretty and is a bit unsettling doesn’t bother me in the slightest. I prefer art that arrests the thought process (hmmm….no wonder she likes Kafka). I have a painting in my dining room that I’ve nicknamed “Angry Man” – he disturbs most of my dinner guests. My favorites of yours are Queen and Make a Wish. Tell me about them.

I’m convinced that whatever esthetic draws me towards outlier art is the same that makes me find scars so fascinating – there’s more to it than meets the eye, there’s a story behind it, it’s interesting. I’ve always wanted to do a B&W series of scars lit in the style of George Hurrell. Something else to dabble in.

HE SAID
Oh don’t sell yourself short when it comes to your skills as a writer. I for one think you’re excellent and you have a wonderful way with the written word and are very articulate–kinda sexy in my book. Do you have a blog where you write about the food you make? I’d love to see it if you’d be willing to share [Phoren: Ha – if only he knew he’d be a topic].

I personally find nothing wrong with “dabbling” in this or that. I think it’s good to explore. Why not? Life is short. I’d like to see the ceramic bowls you made sometime. I took a few ceramic classes here n’ there but I was never good at it. But I’d try it again. I did enjoy getting dirty with the wet mud. I enjoy getting my hands dirty when I make my art. When I make acrylic paintings, I don’t even use a brush but my fingers instead. I love texture and literally feeling my way through the process. The dirtier the better . Geez that sounded perverse. ha!

Thank you for taking a look at my Tumblr site and for your nice comments. Francis Bacon is one of my heroes. A truly wonderful artist. The two pieces you like, Queen and Make a Wish, were made at the same time if not during the same day. I can’t remember. It’s difficult to explain them in words–after all they’re purely visual and exist beyond the logic of words. But I’ll give it my best shot! Queen is yet another in a long long obsession I have with re-configuring the beauty of the female form. I also like to create strong, almost dangerous women. I get the sense of defiance in her expression mixed with beauty. There’s a sharp elegance to her lips and chin. She has the type of lips that I could spend hours kissing and toying with.

As for Make a Wish, that’s a spooky one alright. I like the texture in that one. It’s of a man who, like almost all of my figures, is either physically damaged or going through some sort of transformation. I’m not sure. But there’s also an elegance to him as well. I like that. I’m constantly exploring what others deem “ugly” in a more beautiful way.

It’s much like you said about scars. They tell stories. And I love stories. I love experienced people. All my figures have gone through so much, but have survived and it’s their wisdom that makes them wholly unique and compelling I think. And I think your idea of doing a b&w series of scars would be excellent. You have wonderful ideas.

Ok, switching topics for a sec. Would you like to get a cup of coffee or dinner sometime? Something casual. Or maybe talk on the phone beforehand? I’m very open and flexible.

SHE SAID
I’m afraid my schedule is very odd the next few weeks. We could meet on Thursday for coffee or a drink, but then I’m traveling for work again and won’t be home until the 22nd. Could that work?

HE SAID
Sure that might work. How much traveling do you do for your work on average?

SHE SAID
During the busy time, which is Spring, I travel 50%. The rest of the year, about one week a month. July and around the holidays, travel is strictly saved for my own enjoyment. Traveling for work is decidedly different than traveling for fun, and I’ve never quite been able to combine the two.

HE SAID
I see. That’s quite a bit.

SHE SAID
And…

HE SAID
Well I was just wondering if you have the time to date someone. I’m kinda looking to develop a deep meaningful relationship with a woman.

SHE SAID
I’m not interested in dalliances, either. I’ve had serious relationships in the past with my travel schedule but I won’t say it’s always easy. I find that we spend quality time together when I’m home and the time I’m away can be used for laundry days and errands. But, at this point, I think you may be over-thinking things a bit – we haven’t ever met for a drink yet. You may find my travel schedule the least of our shortcomings.

HE SAID
I’m like totally suffering from writers block right now in how to respond 😦 Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong era with all this email and internet stuff. I’m better on the phone and in person I think. Who knows. Sorry, I’m not making any sense. But please know that I’m not over-thinking things. I just was curious about your schedule and what you’re looking for. You’d be surprised by how many people don’t know what they want or need and beyond that, aren’t able to express that.

We could go see a movie: innocuous night spent hand-holding in a darkened theater with a post movie make-out session.
OrYou could come over and watch a movie: let’s roll around, sweaty and naked, in my bed!

I’m seeing him again on Wednesday. He gave me these choices. It’s been a very long time since I’ve “come over to watch a movie” – a very, very long time. I really need to come over and watch a movie – in fact, I need to watch a dozen or so movies. I think that’s why I haven’t been sleeping well. If I mess this up, I may not get a chance to come over and watch a movie again for a while, but yet I hesitate.

I agreed to go see a movie – not to come over, yet. My body says “YES! Right now!” but my mind wants to wait. I’m concerned that I’m postponing for unrealistic reasons, waiting for a certain someone to come around – who never will.

p.s. when TG asked me what I did this weekend, I told him the truth – I went on a date. Suppressing what looked like surprise, he didn’t ask questions. It probably hurt me more than it did him, but he looked like I had just punched him in the gut.

I agreed to two dates this weekend. That’s about two times more than usual. The first one was Friday night, after work and right around the corner from my office. Why are we attracted to whom we are attracted to?

Date #1 – older man – 58, distinguished grey, good job, likes wine, likes to travel, kids are older, has all of his hair, polite, smart. DUD. No chemistry. I was trapped – I didn’t want to be with this man. I don’t even want to have a second glass of wine with this man. Nice enough, but I feel every minute spent with him is a waste of our time. White bread. I kept thinking he’d be perfect for my older sister. I can hear my best friend in my ear as I write this, “Aw, come on, give the guy a chance!” A chance to do what, exactly? Grow on me? Become interesting? Morph into someone else? No, no, no. Next, please…

After Date #1, I wasn’t looking forward to Date #2 on Sunday. Why bother? On my drive to the wine bar, I was blasting Beck on the stereo attempting to raise my energy level enough to slog through another disappointment. I’m not sure if my expectations were set so low after Friday’s fiasco that anyone even remotely facinating was going to spark my interest, but I actually didn’t throw up in my mouth upon meeting him. In fact, I liked him.

I wouldn’t expect to connect with this man. Not very tall – I’m not sure exactly how short, I was wearing my killer heels, but I’d guess about 5’8”, four (four!) boys under 16, scout-master, learning how to figure skate, separated, but not quiet divorced yet, and I’m pretty sure I’m NOT the only girl he dated this weekend. I can hear my best friend commenting on this one, “WTF? He doesn’t sound like your type at ALL! How tall is he?!”

With all that said, I had a great time with him, good conversation, I’m attracted to him (he has these smooth, sleek arm muscles – yum) and we’re going out again on Friday. Yay! I’m looking forward to it.

Yellow flag: we haven’t had a Saturday date – yet. I think that’s because he has a Saturday date already. I’m giving him slack – when he arranged his Saturday dates, he hadn’t met ME yet. I’m hoping after our second date that his priorities will adjust.

I have a new contact in my cell phone. His name is listed as “Jaques the French man!” He added it himself. He wants me to come to his apartment and cook him dinner. He says he’ll make a tarte de pomme for dessert. Really, though, he wants me for dessert. He’s not shy about telling me what he wants.

Jaques is a French acrobat.

We “meet” during his performance last night. My friend, P, was the first to notice him noticing me. Each time he walks past our table, each time he takes the stage, he steals glances at me. I don’t notice at first – until P points it out, and points it out again, and again. He’s waiting for me after the show, inviting us out for drinks.

His friend is right on his tail – a pretty-boy Asian with long, frosted hair. Handing P my card, he tells her I should call him “if I want someone cool and available” (in contrast to my French acrobat). His card reads “Style Editor and Social Ambassador.” In actuality, he’s a bartender at the dinner cabaret where we met Jaques. Again, less than ideal.

What the heck has been going on these last few weeks? I seem to be attracting the men – a lot of them. My pheromones must be high – well, at least my haven’t-been-touched-in-almost-a-year pheromones, that is. Unfortunately, I seem to be stuck attracting those who are, as Irish Katie says, “less than ideal”.

These LTI’s gives me a bit of hope, though. For every ten “less than ideals,” there’s got to be one potential worth dating, right? This month, there’s been married, clueless, crushed by divorce, married acrobat and self-ascribed “social ambassador”. What’s next? Who’s next?

An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, or circumstances. The thread may stretch or tangle but will never break.

This morning, while I was in the shower, which is where I do my best thinking, my mind wandered over to contemplations of the red thread theory – the Asian legend that the gods tie an invisible red string around the pinky (or ankles) of those that are destined to meet each.

Such a beautiful concept and imagery – two bodies, gently bound by a red thread, knotted and tangled as they weave their way through the world.

Last week, within a matter of days, I received three confessions from men who admitted to some form of attraction towards me. The first, who is unavailable, has discovered some unresolved sentimentalities from a long-crumbled relationship. The second man, a customer of mine, admitted that he’s been attracted to me since 2008 and just now got the courage to tell me so. Attracted to me physically, mind you; he knows nothing of me as a person. The third, a co-worker going through a divorce (and substantially lubricated), admitted that he’s desired me since the very beginning – nine years ago. I like and respect this man, though we have nothing in common, and am not entirely opposed to what he was suggesting. However, by morning and with a clearer head, he could only sheepishly look me in the eye as he remembered what he professed the hazy night before.

Last week, they were coming out of the woodwork. It’s not a dearth of men that fetters my romance, it’s my challenge of finding the man at the end of my string.