You know, looking back, I wonder what made Jared go off on a Pokemon adventure when all he was told to do was mow his yard. Oak popping up and telling me to get a Pokemon certainly wouldn’t make ME leave MY precious cable jack.

In Jared’s defense, of the seven of those Pokemon there, four are territorial carnivores who are likely to actively try and murder him should he set foot on the field, and Muk may just suffocate him with a hug. Looking at it that way, it’s not hard to guess why he chose Magikarp. It’s by far the least intimidating monster out there.