Simcha

Want your peen to look two inches bigger? No, this is not spam from a third world pyramid scheme promising to enlarge your manhood. Designer and reality TV show whore Andrew Christian has invented underpants with a padded cup bulge built into each pair. And it's surprisingly life-like and, get this, uncircumcised! Basically,…

Earlier this week, I broke down the "23 Weapons Every Sexy Woman Needs In Her Arsenal." But how could I ignore you, my beloved, Frisky gentlemen? I’m sure you’ve got this lovin’-the-ladies thing down. Obviously, you’re reading this site! But because you hotties asked (thanks @Maegara), here’s the formula for what women find…

It’s new tunes Tuesday! Yay! And even though this week is light on the new music, it’s more like lite. Seriously, this week, the fat has been cut and the three releases I bring you are tasty! First off, M.I.A. has just released a mix tape called Vickileekx in support of Wikileaks founder…

In this vid, see father-daughter duo Jorge and Alexa Narvaez perform the most adorbs version of Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros' "Home." Warning: Watching this video may have a negative effect on your form of birth control. [The Daily What]…

I whip my hair belt back and forth! Well, I would if I had this combination belt and cat of nine tails. Hint, hint, boy toys! But you don't have to bend over to purchase this kinky item. Made by dirty designer Incoqnito, it retails for a mere 89 bones. Think of it…

Being a sexy lady isn’t just fun; it’s empowering. There’s nothing quite like making a man weak in the knees when you walk through the door. But like anything thrilling, it takes some adventurous accoutrements to be a vixen. After the jump, find out everything you’ll ever need to be va-va-va-voom!

Gather round, girls, let me tell you a story. Before the late-'70s, when Aunt Flo came to visit, women would have to wear contraptions called sanitary belts. They were diaper-like and came all the way up to an elastic waistband. Oh, the horror! Needless to say, when adhesive-back pads and tampons came around,…

As y'all know, I'm obsessed with the eleganza and extravaganza that is "RuPaul's Drag Race." But behind all those rhinestones there is even more eye-catching hotness: the Drag Race Pit Crew. Those bikini bottom-clad boy wonders have amazing bods and, as it turns out, mad sexy dance moves. RuPaul knows how to pick 'em!

One man, four puppets make for a sweet sporting event half-time show. Yes, dude has the balls to cover the Village People with dummies, shave his legs, and strut around athletes. Why didn't I think of this?! Oh, because I wanna be a "Macho, Macho Man," and this guy clearly has that look on lockdown.

One New Year's Eve, back in college, I literally had to duck to avoid the kid who lived down the hall (who looked like Jesus and smelled like he hadn’t bathed since then) from drunkenly planting a kiss on me at midnight. He had been dancing with his pet snake for hours before he tried…

Ladies, prepare to have your heart melted. There's a new teen crooner in Tinseltown, Charlie Williams, and he sings as pretty as he looks. Plus, he can play drums, beat box, and is about to get his pilot's license. Clearly, this 16-year-old dude doesn't need a swagger coach—he's got the awesome thing down.

This slogan is more effective than even the ol' right hand. Hand sanitizer really is the perfect addition to any masturbation station. But be careful you don't get this squirt bottle confused with your lube! [CVXN]…

With the slippery slope that's been the economy, we all want to know how to avoid getting our businesses buried in an avalanche. Lucky for us, JWT Intelligence has broken down the big picture of 2011 commerce trends into an amazingly cool cartoon. Wow, who knew economics could be so entertaining?

When it comes to getting a man to settle down with you, we’ve all heard advice like “hold out on sex” or “be unavailable.” But if that worked, nuns, Olympic athletes, and frigid work-a-holics would be like dude catnip. So, clearly, we need to go straight to the source to find out what…

Recently, while perusing the dollar store with a wad of ones burning a hole in my pocket, my friend Matt found this bath thing. Uh, what exactly is a "New Century Sanitarian Thing"? Dollar store, you so craaaaazy!

In Nanning, China, teens and condoms go together, well, like teens and cell phones. Apparently it’s all the rage for kids to sport cell phones with prophylactic charms. Safety first! The condom accoutrement come in a variety of colors decorated with zodiac, cartoon characters, or cool designs. While it’s great that the message to use…

Simply Irresistible

Over the years, we've poked fun at a lot of "based on a true story" movies that turned out to be bullshit. But then we thought that maybe we should stop giving Hollywood shit for embellishing history a bit if it lets them tell a slightly better story. So instead, we decided to give Hollywood…

As you slog your way through the myriad not-yet-April Fools' Day pranks that plague this nation, revel in this: no one has ever pranked someone better than Michael Jackson pranked Russell Crowe, and he did it for years. In an interview with The Guardian, Crowe revealed that despite having never met Jackson,…