World's largest sperm bank says redheads need not apply

It’s bad enough that redheaded guys grew up with playground (or frat house) taunts about their ginger pubes - now they’re being told that their sperm isn’t welcome either. Cryos, the world’s largest sperm bank, says that they now get so many donations that they can be picky, and, frankly, there just isn’t enough demand for redheads’ sperm (this news was reported in the U.K. newspaper The Telegraph – if you think being a redhead in the U.S. is tough work, try being a “ginga” over there).

“I do not think you choose a redhead, unless the partner – for example, the sterile male – has red hair, or because the lone woman has a preference for redheads,” says Ole Schou, Cryos’s director, sounding a little bit like one of those guys who may have taunted redheads on the playground. “And that’s perhaps not so many, especially in the latter case.”

Apparently the only place where redheaded sperm is in demand is in Ireland, where it sells “like hot cakes,” according to Schou. If you want to donate to Cryos, you’ll have much better luck if you’ve got brown eyes and brown hair. Kind of makes you want to secretly dye your hair and infiltrate the system with covert ginger sperm, doesn’t it, redheads? Either that or move to Ireland.