Save Yourself From A Depressing Retirement

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In retirement you must be reborn or else wither away. That’s the premise of a new book, The Retirement Maze (Rowman & Littlefield, 2012), which explores tactics to help retirees on the path to a new and improved retirement. It looks at who would benefit from taking a “bridge” job, why it’s important to build non-work-related friendships before retirement, and it recommends that retirees have more sex. Seriously.

“When you retire, you’re going through a major life change; you have to reorient yourself to figure out who you are,” says co-author Dr. Louis Primavera, 68, a psychologist and former marriage counselor and now Dean of the School of Health Sciences at Touro College. Co-author Rob Pascale, who retired at age 51 after 31 years in corporate market research, floundered at various ventures including importing produce, before returning to social science and working on the book. It’s not a typical “rah-rah book that tells you how great retirement is” (Primavera’s words) or a personal finance book but a book about how folks adjust to retirement overall, for better or worse.

The team reviewed existing retirement literature, surveyed 1,500 retirees and 400 pre-retirees online, did in-depth in-person interviews, and reflected on their own experiences. The outtake? You have a better chance of success if you’re mentally ready to leave the workforce, and have a well-thought out retirement plan. But many folks are pushed into retirement early, and most folks, even those who choose to retire early, don’t have a plan at all, or not a well-thought out one. Hence the floundering and dissatisfaction. One out of four retirees has a difficult time and is not at all adjusted—they actually suffer from a mild form of depression, the authors found.

What differentiates successful retirees from unsuccessful ones? Successful retirees have a positive attitude and are more motivated. High income folks tend to be happier, but still only 51% of them said they felt completely adjusted to retirement. It takes time—while only 18% of those retired 6 months or less felt they were completely adjusted in the author’s survey, that percentage climbed to 35% with 2 years in retirement, 41% with 3 or 4 years, and to 55% with 5 or more years, topping out at 59% at 11 or more years.

Here are the five main takeaways from the book for a well-adjusted retirement.

Put Back Structure, Purpose, And Direction. This means planning and goal-setting and most importantly--carrying through with those goals, whether small everyday matters like taking a shower every morning or big goals like taking on a volunteer job. Establish routines, and stick to a schedule.

Manage Your Expectations. “Having high expectations can lead to depression,” warns Primavera. But doing nothing can be very stressful, especially for a couple. Before you retire, imagine what a typical week or six months would be like, and discuss with your partner or best friend how you would realistically fill the new free time you’ll have.

Stay Socially Connected. For most retirees, their social network plummets as they lose their work friends. “Human beings don’t do well without connectedness to others,” Primavera says. Call up an old friend. Join groups to make new friends. Don’t limit your social life to your family.

Get Your Finances In Order. Before you retire, take a hard look at where you spend money, and put together a detailed financial plan. What one considers enough money is very individual—one interviewee with $5 million in assets was still nervous he didn’t have enough. If money issues are stressful for you while you’re working, know that finances can be even more unnerving once you stop getting a paycheck.

Keep Searching And Experimenting. If your first stab at retirement doesn’t work out, try again. A retired police officer who was interviewed for the book tried being a private investigator and hated it, turned down a town manager job, and happily settled on a volunteer position working on missing children cases alongside other retired cops. “The only way you’re going to find something is to experiment ‘til you find something that clicks,” Primavera says. So keep an open mind.

I'm an associate editor on the Money team at Forbes based in Fairfield County, Connecticut, leading Forbes' retirement coverage. I manage contributors who cover retirement and wealth management. Since I joined Forbes in 1997, my favorite stories have been on how people fuel...