The Florida State Board of Education approved revisions to the Common Core State Standards, now known as Florida Standards, or ‘Don’t worry, we’ll help you graduate because the new numbers will look better for us.”

Board members also expressed support for a simplified school grading formula opting for temporary suspension of the longstanding A-F system and replaced with one going from A-G.

“The ‘A’ will still be the benchmark for excellence and a ‘G’ will stand for ‘without a clue’.

The popular ‘F’ grade will now become passing which will enable many failing students to graduate thereby increasing the grad rate by pushing them out of the schools and onto the streets without a viable way to support themselves.

“We know this will be a drain on social services throughout the state, but we can’t afford to have an educated population around here. It makes the job of the legislature much more difficult,” said state representative Orville Butts, R-Lehigh Acres, Chairman, select committee on uneducated citizen reform and manipulation.

The overhaul of the grading system began when Tea Party activists said the Common Core was an example of federal intrusion into basic principles of education.

Their system of education seems to be a literal version of the bible which has been translated in over 500 languages by people with their own interpretations over the course of human history.

I think that makes it clear.

“We know in our heart that the Earth was formed 6,000 years ago when God had 6 extra days on his hands and a plan to create something wonderful” said Reverend Billy Jo Watters.

“The standards for education will apply everywhere except in Tallahassee”, a spokesperson for the Governor said, “We do things different here (sic).”