How do you discipline?

Obviously I'm not going to be disciplining a newborn but I'm wondering how mums of older children discipline their kids these days? I grew up in a divorced household- mum would paddle me with the wooden spoon and send me to my room. Dad hated smacking me so he'd give me a little tap on the hand and make me write lines. Both of them would tell me they were really disappointed in me (which was so much worse than them being angry! I hated disappointing them!).

Has the way your parents disciplined you affected how you discipline your own kids? What do you find most effective? I read on Hot Topics a while ago about locking your child OUT of their room so they can't play with their toys and I thought it was a brilliant idea! I'm not adverse to giving a smack on the bum (not in anger, more just to shock them) but it needs to be done in the right situation.

How old are your kids and what works best to keep them in line?

Obviously I'm not going to be disciplining a newborn but I'm wondering how mums of older children discipline their kids these days? I grew up in a divorced household- mum would paddle me with the wooden spoon and send me to my room. Dad hated smacking me so he'd give me a little tap on the hand and make me write lines. Both of them would tell me they were really disappointed in me (which was so much worse than them being angry! I hated disappointing them!).

Has the way your parents disciplined you affected how you discipline your own kids? What do you find most effective? I read on Hot Topics a while ago about locking your child OUT of their room so they can't play with their toys and I thought it was a brilliant idea! I'm not adverse to giving a smack on the bum (not in anger, more just to shock them) but it needs to be done in the right situation.

I will not be smacking my children. Many of my memories of childhood revolve around getting hit by my parents in the name of discipline. I was afraid of my parents and to this day struggle to respect them. I have started using 1-2-3 Magic, a counting & time out process that is as much teaching parents to discipline & control their emotions as it is about the kids. It has worked so far with my ds.

I will not be smacking my children. Many of my memories of childhood revolve around getting hit by my parents in the name of discipline. I was afraid of my parents and to this day struggle to respect them. I have started using 1-2-3 Magic, a counting & time out process that is as much teaching parents to discipline & control their emotions as it is about the kids. It has worked so far with my ds.

I was smacked and believe myself to have turned out ok but my boyfriend is against it and just says there's nothing positive about it- he says discipline will be more effective if the child is sent to their room or has something taken from them so they are able to think about their actions. Ah he states the case much better than I do. Guess we'll be doing it that way. Tho to be honest my boyfriend hardly does anything because his mum has done it is whole life- eg. if he didn't wash up after she asked him she would just do it herself. So I don't see he would have gotten much discipline when he was younger.

I was smacked and believe myself to have turned out ok but my boyfriend is against it and just says there's nothing positive about it- he says discipline will be more effective if the child is sent to their room or has something taken from them so they are able to think about their actions. Ah he states the case much better than I do. Guess we'll be doing it that way. Tho to be honest my boyfriend hardly does anything because his mum has done it is whole life- eg. if he didn't wash up after she asked him she would just do it herself. So I don't see he would have gotten much discipline when he was younger.

I have never been smacked nor has my husband and will never smack my children!! I have friends that have been smacked and they have turned out fine, but for so many reasons I just don't believe in it. I think there are many other positive ways of teaching your kids about the world and behavior than resorting to smacking.

I have never been smacked nor has my husband and will never smack my children!! I have friends that have been smacked and they have turned out fine, but for so many reasons I just don't believe in it. I think there are many other positive ways of teaching your kids about the world and behavior than resorting to smacking.

Once my brother and I were old enough to value our possessions our mum used to take something we valued and lock it in her cupboard everytime we were naughty. One day when my brother and I were really naughty we ended up with nothing in our rooms but our beds. We had to earn our stuff back by being good.

Once my brother and I were old enough to value our possessions our mum used to take something we valued and lock it in her cupboard everytime we were naughty. One day when my brother and I were really naughty we ended up with nothing in our rooms but our beds. We had to earn our stuff back by being good.

TBH-it depends on the naughtiness... For example-running out on a road, I might tap their bums for a shock, drawing on walls, I'd make them cleanIt then remove the pen etc. It's all very personal. You have to do what your comfy with.

TBH-it depends on the naughtiness... For example-running out on a road, I might tap their bums for a shock, drawing on walls, I'd make them cleanIt then remove the pen etc. It's all very personal. You have to do what your comfy with.

Peanut sorry had to laugh at writing lines as a form of punishment. It actually makes sense. I might use that for my older children. My mum also chased me around the house with a wooden spoon, I'd lock myself in the bathroom or hide under the kitchen table so she couldn't get me lol. Its hard to say what form of punishment should be used because it can be a instant reaction as to why you're punishing in the first place. What I tend to do is get a plastic bag and walk around the toy room and fill it up with the kids toys and bits n pieces etc. Sometimes the room does need a bit of a clean out too as my kids tend to hoard things. My kids know that I mean business when I mention the bag haha.

Peanut sorry had to laugh at writing lines as a form of punishment. It actually makes sense. I might use that for my older children. My mum also chased me around the house with a wooden spoon, I'd lock myself in the bathroom or hide under the kitchen table so she couldn't get me lol. Its hard to say what form of punishment should be used because it can be a instant reaction as to why you're punishing in the first place. What I tend to do is get a plastic bag and walk around the toy room and fill it up with the kids toys and bits n pieces etc. Sometimes the room does need a bit of a clean out too as my kids tend to hoard things. My kids know that I mean business when I mention the bag haha.

It depends on what my LO is like. I think smacking works for some kids and not others. I was smacked and have immense love and respect for my parents. DF was such a little sh*t he says he needed a good smack for discipline growing up otherwise he would have been wwaaay out of control. In saying that though not all kids respond to smacking so I'm just going to see if I have a little sh*t or a little angel and then I'll figure out what works best.

It depends on what my LO is like. I think smacking works for some kids and not others. I was smacked and have immense love and respect for my parents. DF was such a little sh*t he says he needed a good smack for discipline growing up otherwise he would have been wwaaay out of control. In saying that though not all kids respond to smacking so I'm just going to see if I have a little sh*t or a little angel and then I'll figure out what works best.

It is an interesting topic Peanut! As a teacher I think I am good at discipline with kids at school, but my lo could be a totally different story! I was smacked, but really don't feel I could do it myself. I do believe consistency in following through with discipline makes a HUGE difference. Kids at school know when a teacher is 'all talk'. If you say 'you can't have your toys if you .... ' or whatever, you need to follow through no matter how big of a tantrum. Takes a lot more effort, but works!

It is an interesting topic Peanut! As a teacher I think I am good at discipline with kids at school, but my lo could be a totally different story! I was smacked, but really don't feel I could do it myself. I do believe consistency in following through with discipline makes a HUGE difference. Kids at school know when a teacher is 'all talk'. If you say 'you can't have your toys if you .... ' or whatever, you need to follow through no matter how big of a tantrum. Takes a lot more effort, but works!

I think taking away something the child values is probably the best form of punishment and plan on doing so. PP was right- you definitely have to follow through on it! As for writing lines, I hated doing it and I think it was a really good punishment now that I look back. And as a bonus, I have ridiculously neat handwriting and am very good at spelling.

It's interesting to see how many parents wouldn't smack their children. I think it has a time and a place- like I wouldn't smack my child if they hit another child because it's setting a bad example. I think a smack would be my last resort, if I had tried other methods and my kid was just being a horrid little brat I would give them a small smack on the bum and send them to bed.

My mum actually broke the wooden spoon on my bum when I was about ten! I don't love my parents less because they smacked me, I know my dad only did it as an absolute last resort because he hated it, and it was so effective coming from him because it shocked me. So I think used rarely, it can be a bit of a wake up call for some kids.

I think taking away something the child values is probably the best form of punishment and plan on doing so. PP was right- you definitely have to follow through on it! As for writing lines, I hated doing it and I think it was a really good punishment now that I look back. And as a bonus, I have ridiculously neat handwriting and am very good at spelling.

It's interesting to see how many parents wouldn't smack their children. I think it has a time and a place- like I wouldn't smack my child if they hit another child because it's setting a bad example. I think a smack would be my last resort, if I had tried other methods and my kid was just being a horrid little brat I would give them a small smack on the bum and send them to bed.

My mum actually broke the wooden spoon on my bum when I was about ten! I don't love my parents less because they smacked me, I know my dad only did it as an absolute last resort because he hated it, and it was so effective coming from him because it shocked me. So I think used rarely, it can be a bit of a wake up call for some kids.

We have a toy room specifically so I can send my kids to their room. But normally I smack or take things off them...nikolas is 3 and 1/2 and Levi is 17 months. Nik gets a good smack on the bottom but Levi gets a tap on the hand for now. Nik wouldn't pack up his toys one day so I packed up all the ones on the floor into a garbage bag and put them in the shed, I told him he could have them back when he knew how to do as he was told. That's what I mean by take things. Tried time outs with Nik they just didn't work for him. All kids are different, I find I'm disciplining my kids the way my parents did to me, even though I swore I never would, I turned out alright, a good smack (flogging at times) never did me any long term damage.

We have a toy room specifically so I can send my kids to their room. But normally I smack or take things off them...nikolas is 3 and 1/2 and Levi is 17 months. Nik gets a good smack on the bottom but Levi gets a tap on the hand for now. Nik wouldn't pack up his toys one day so I packed up all the ones on the floor into a garbage bag and put them in the shed, I told him he could have them back when he knew how to do as he was told. That's what I mean by take things. Tried time outs with Nik they just didn't work for him. All kids are different, I find I'm disciplining my kids the way my parents did to me, even though I swore I never would, I turned out alright, a good smack (flogging at times) never did me any long term damage.

My mum used the wooden spoon on me too! Once I was playing on the corner of a busy rd with the kids next door after she told me not to so she broke the wooden spoon on my arse in the backyard while all the kids spied through the fence. She taped it up to use again after! as I got older I'd fight back and we had lots of struggles while she was trying to take me to the 'police station' lol i turned out good but when I'm angry It's hard to not express it in a physical way like throwing things. I hate seeing her disipline my little sisters, it instantly makes me frustrated that she yells. I love my mum though and do anything for her but No way will my son be smacked. He is only 3 but when he went through terrible 2's we done time out in his room. He has no toys in there, just books. Most of the time he would take himself to his room after he was naughty. He responds so well when I explain things to him and why its wrong instead of yelling. this has worked so far cos we haven't even had to do time out in a long time. He's so well behaved I didn't think it was possible to have such a good kid! So I'm going to stick to this method.

My mum used the wooden spoon on me too! Once I was playing on the corner of a busy rd with the kids next door after she told me not to so she broke the wooden spoon on my arse in the backyard while all the kids spied through the fence. She taped it up to use again after! as I got older I'd fight back and we had lots of struggles while she was trying to take me to the 'police station' lol i turned out good but when I'm angry It's hard to not express it in a physical way like throwing things. I hate seeing her disipline my little sisters, it instantly makes me frustrated that she yells. I love my mum though and do anything for her but No way will my son be smacked. He is only 3 but when he went through terrible 2's we done time out in his room. He has no toys in there, just books. Most of the time he would take himself to his room after he was naughty. He responds so well when I explain things to him and why its wrong instead of yelling. this has worked so far cos we haven't even had to do time out in a long time. He's so well behaved I didn't think it was possible to have such a good kid! So I'm going to stick to this method.

I hate smacking, there are very few occasions that I have with my girls who are 7 & 9. It's been years since I have and it was always the last resort. I much prefer to stuff them up emotionally by being really really disappointed!!! That usually works a treat. Not sure if it's a girl thing, will find out when my 10 week old son gets bigger I guess. But would much rather take things off them than smack

I hate smacking, there are very few occasions that I have with my girls who are 7 & 9. It's been years since I have and it was always the last resort. I much prefer to stuff them up emotionally by being really really disappointed!!! That usually works a treat. Not sure if it's a girl thing, will find out when my 10 week old son gets bigger I guess. But would much rather take things off them than smack

I think I will use different things depending on the situation. I was smacked as a kid and it worked fine for me.When/if I do decide to smack it will be with a wooden soon, as I want my hands to be for love/comfort/hugs etc... I will also make sure it's not excessive, but just enough to give a shock and bit of a sting. I think I might save it for big things, like safety ie. not touching hot things on the stove, road safety, running away in public places. I'll probably try time outs and taking things away also. I also like the writing lines for when they are a bit older!

I think I will use different things depending on the situation. I was smacked as a kid and it worked fine for me.When/if I do decide to smack it will be with a wooden soon, as I want my hands to be for love/comfort/hugs etc... I will also make sure it's not excessive, but just enough to give a shock and bit of a sting. I think I might save it for big things, like safety ie. not touching hot things on the stove, road safety, running away in public places. I'll probably try time outs and taking things away also. I also like the writing lines for when they are a bit older!

My DH and i both believe in smacking, not beating or really hurting to make a bruise or anything horrible, but we both know we will do it to our children, not in public as its "illegal" but what is wrong with a tap on the hand?

well thats my point anyway

I and all my family have all grown up beings smacked and so has DH

My DH and i both believe in smacking, not beating or really hurting to make a bruise or anything horrible, but we both know we will do it to our children, not in public as its "illegal" but what is wrong with a tap on the hand?

My children are 12 and 8. I very rarely smack either of them. My oldest is devastated if she gets smacked (although she's getting too big for that now) and if my youngest gets smacked it just makes her 10 times more psycho. My oldest generally just requires a look and will apologise to me later but the youngest is tricky. Generally I take things from her eg her easter eggs, her favourite doll house or Barbies. To be honest though, nothing really works with her. I am a teacher and have many strategies for getting children to do what I want, but my youngest doesn't respond well to any of them, she is a real handful. I have 2 very different children. I am hoping this baby will take after her oldest sister and be a good girl. My mum used to smack me with the wooden spoon all the time and I was such a good kid. I would hate to see what she would've done had I been awful. If Dad ever disciplined, it was a lecture which we probably found worse than the spoon!

My children are 12 and 8. I very rarely smack either of them. My oldest is devastated if she gets smacked (although she's getting too big for that now) and if my youngest gets smacked it just makes her 10 times more psycho. My oldest generally just requires a look and will apologise to me later but the youngest is tricky. Generally I take things from her eg her easter eggs, her favourite doll house or Barbies. To be honest though, nothing really works with her. I am a teacher and have many strategies for getting children to do what I want, but my youngest doesn't respond well to any of them, she is a real handful. I have 2 very different children. I am hoping this baby will take after her oldest sister and be a good girl. My mum used to smack me with the wooden spoon all the time and I was such a good kid. I would hate to see what she would've done had I been awful. If Dad ever disciplined, it was a lecture which we probably found worse than the spoon!

My mum only hit me once and I would have been about 14 at the time. I remember being so shocked. I couldn't ever hit/smack my children. My Aunty did it a few weeks ago to one of hers and I was so shocked and horrified by it joolz and I both felt the same and said its not something we could do. I know, never say never but I just couldn't. I literally sat at the table with my mouth open for a few minutes. It was horrible.

My mum only hit me once and I would have been about 14 at the time. I remember being so shocked. I couldn't ever hit/smack my children. My Aunty did it a few weeks ago to one of hers and I was so shocked and horrified by it joolz and I both felt the same and said its not something we could do. I know, never say never but I just couldn't. I literally sat at the table with my mouth open for a few minutes. It was horrible.

I've used a spoon very gently only on my 3 year old once and now when he is getting to the point where I may have to smack him I say "should I get the spoon?" seems to work a treat, his pride was hurt the day he got the spoon so he remembers, and no permanent damage, he loves me more than I ever thought he would, he is constantly wanting cuddles, he doesn't hate me that's for sure! I have smacked him in public, and would do it again. DH worked in childcare until recently and they had to do training on what was abuse, not that they ever smacked a child but were told that a smack on the bottom as long as it wasn't excessive wasn't illegal, it's illegal to hit with a weapon (ie, spoon) and it's illegal to hit above the shoulders. So when an old woman in the shopping centre told me she would call the police I firstly told her to mind her damn business and that how I decided to parent my child was my choice and then recited that to her about weapons and above the shoulders and asked that she go ahead and call the police, she just shook her head and walked away.

I've used a spoon very gently only on my 3 year old once and now when he is getting to the point where I may have to smack him I say "should I get the spoon?" seems to work a treat, his pride was hurt the day he got the spoon so he remembers, and no permanent damage, he loves me more than I ever thought he would, he is constantly wanting cuddles, he doesn't hate me that's for sure! I have smacked him in public, and would do it again. DH worked in childcare until recently and they had to do training on what was abuse, not that they ever smacked a child but were told that a smack on the bottom as long as it wasn't excessive wasn't illegal, it's illegal to hit with a weapon (ie, spoon) and it's illegal to hit above the shoulders. So when an old woman in the shopping centre told me she would call the police I firstly told her to mind her damn business and that how I decided to parent my child was my choice and then recited that to her about weapons and above the shoulders and asked that she go ahead and call the police, she just shook her head and walked away.

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