the unexpected mission…

October 18, 2007

I keep a running list in my head of the cool people/parents I want to know at Jack’s preschool. I sometimes admire from afar and wait far too long to introduce myself. It’s a shame really, because my intuition is almost always spot on and I end up wasting perfectly lovely friendship time in the process. Brea Doutt has been hanging out at the top for over a year now. Pretty much anyone with 2 kids with cool names AND a tiny nose ring should be at the top, ya know what I mean? Besides being a fashonista, Brea has a matter-of-fact kind (as in kindness) way about her. It is with this kindness and deep heart that she has found herself on a mission she was not expecting.

Brea’s mom was diagnosed with ALS in March. It’s a destructive, mean disease that moves quickly and destroys everything in it’s path. I’m not sure anyone knows exactly how they will feel and respond when faced with something so big, so hard. Especially when we are mothers and we never really stop needing a mother. Brea did not waste any precious time. She just started moving, holding the space for hope by educating, spilling her newly acquired knowledge to those close and far away.

I listen to her speak, I watch her face.

“I can’t explain it, it’s just my life now.” she says. There is no wavering in her voice, it just is. This mission, this path that was so unexpected and yet Brea embraces it with grace and determination. She speaks from the knowledge of mother love, my mind starts to wonder how proud her mom must feel.

All I can think is how crappy it is for this to be the way you find a new purpose you didn’t discover yourself or imagine you would ever be choosing to look so squarely in the face.

“Can you believe that there are as many people living with ALS as there are MS in the United States?” …..she goes on. We discuss the need for research and what role people’s perceptions about the disease play. It seems there is not nearly enough funding which makes it difficult to drum up hope and the possibility of progress. This is where Brea’s path is laid out so clearly for her. She has to tell her story and listen to others, and then hope the word will spread. She will forever organize walks and dinners, constantly thinking of ways to generate awareness. At the end of the day she will return to her mom, who must have known all along that her girl would take this mission, even the unexpected one, so deep into her heart….

Oh I wish Dan…well maybe, I’m still not sure. We have reservations to camp this weekend and have yet to figure out if it’s a good idea with the weather forecast. I would love a chance to walk and meet both you and Alicia…it’s been too long coming. Alicia has always been at the top of my internet- cool-people-i-need-to-meet list….if I don’t see you all I hope Sharon’s Angels and Hoppe’s Hellraisers have great turnouts.