This week's contest:
We're looking for the smartest, funniest, most original caption — a la New Yorker cartoons — for this desert still from the January issue of Vogue.

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It's not a mirage, that is David Strathairn.

What you win:
Grab the eyes of passers-by with handmade jewelry from Metal Sugar. One runner-up will get this amoeba necklace and the winner this sweet cupcake ring. Note the ring is a size 6 and both items are sterling silver.

Submit your captions in the comments only. The deadline for contest entries is Monday, January 10 at 12pm ET. On that evening (1/10), a Jezebel editor will pick two winners(!) from the comments on this post at her sole discretion based on wittiness and originality. We will notify the two winners by email on Tuesday, January 11th by 12pm ET.

Some additional requirements: You must have a valid email associated with your commenter account. You may submit an entry or request a winner's list via mail to Gawker Media, Attn: Weekly Jezebel Bounty Contest, 210 Elizabeth, 4th Floor, NY, NY, 10012. Approximate retail value for prizes is less than $200.