The truth is, I’d hate for those who have never tried bondage before to be afraid of this invasion of ‘shackles’ into their bedroom, into their sex life. To the uninitiated, it can be highly intimidating to feel like your sex life needs anything other than you and your partner, enjoying one another’s embrace and attentions.

What is this ‘bondage’ thing everyone keeps going on about, anyway? Why is it so popular?

When bondage is talked about in a sexual or sensual sense, it refers to the practice of restraining someone’s movements for the physical and psychological pleasure, enjoyment and fulfilment of both the one being bound and the one doing the restraining. Usually, this includes the use of bondage sex toys such as ankle and wrist cuffs, spreader bars, Japanese bondage rope for Shibari and a whole variety of other options.

Bondage has also come to be known as the ‘catch-all’ phrase for all things kinky, ranging from light role play in the bedroom to full-on, hardcore BDSM activities. Strictly, bondage refers only to the practices restraining movement, but words have a habit of evolving or being appropriated as necessary.

Kink and bondage have always been popular with perhaps a more underground area of society. Due to the overwhelming taboo attitude from mainstream culture in previous years, BDSM was forced into hiding – being an activity that took place in the secrecy of private clubs and a hidden part of couples’ sex lives, a shameful secret.

Regardless of what you think of the Fifty Shades of Grey books, there’s no denying that the popularity of this trilogy brought bondage and kink into the consciousness of the general public, making these activities palatable and almost acceptable. More people than ever before want to experience this perceived-as-new way of spicing up their foreplay and sex.

If you don’t know how to begin and unwilling to part with your hard-earned cash for accessories before you even know if you’ll like it, there are some ways to experience a taste of kink and bondage without any extras in the bedroom at all. Aside from your partner, of course.

Here are 7 ‘kinky but cuff free’ ideas to try out the next time you’re feeling a little adventurous.

1. Tell them you want to be held down. Even saying the words aloud will feel kinky enough, but if you’re not quite brave enough to reveal the desires out loud, why not put them in a saucy text message, instant message or email? Or maybe you want to do the holding down. Approach it from a gentle and cautious point of view, with sensuality and eroticism at the forefront of your mind. It needs to be for the pleasure of your partner as well as your own satisfaction, remember. Consent, above all things. Being held down during sex is the most natural form of bondage you can experience.

2. Introduce spanking through role-play. A Dominatrix bullwhip might sound like the sort of thing you’d simply never enjoy, but a firm hand spanking punishment from your partner? A lot more sexy, yet still corporal punishment strictly speaking. Why not lead the way by suggesting some naughty roleplay before sex, perhaps combined with dressing up? It’s easy to move from scenes such as naughty schoolgirl and a Doctor or Nurse’s body inspection session to a sound bottom spanking of a naughty girl or boy.

3. Try some masturbation and orgasm control. Again, there’s no need to dive into the deep end by throwing them under lock and key with a chastity device. Being controlled or having control of your partner’s orgasm and masturbation schedule is undeniably erotic. Depending on their usual masturbation frequency, you can decide between you whether you ban them (or give up your self-pleasure control) for a couple of days or a week. When you’re finally ‘allowed’ to masturbate or orgasm, ideally with your partner present, the result will be so much more intense and dramatic.

4. Call them names. Nice, dirty names, of course. If you’re used to dirty talk before and during sex, it can become a natural progression to include some terms of respect or submission, as well as the usual depraved names such as ‘slut’, ‘whore’, ‘bitch’ and the like. The effects of calling a dominant partner Miss, Mistress or Ma’am, or Sir, Master or Lord depending on their gender is quite profound. Recognising the Dominant and submissive dynamic by using these titles adds an extra hot factor to proceedings.

5. Layer pain amongst the pleasure. If you enjoy exploring one another’s bodies during foreplay and erotic massage, why not include slight tidbits of pain mingled in? Watch for their responses. During the rush of endorphins which happens at high states of arousal, lightly tapping into pain reflexes can add to the pleasure. This might be a slight nip of their skin between licks and kisses, or turning strokes of the skin into light grazes and even a passionate scratch or two with fingernails. This can progress into hair pulling during sex, and from there you can incorporate other ways to deliver the pleasure of pain.

6. Strive for obedience. As your partner what they’d do to please you, then teasingly call their bluff. Suggest that you go for a date night, but request that they wear no underwear. Alternatively you could tell them that you want them to go remove their underwear, then return and hand it to you, while you’re out. Getting naughty in public while no-one else knows what you’re doing is such a turn on, and submitting to your partner and agreeing to be obedient to their whims is an extremely kinky way of discovering new highs.

7. Restrain yourself. We’ve talked about enjoying a natural form of bondage where you’re held down by your partner, but what about having to remain motionless while they do what they will? Not being allowed to move while they perform oral sex on you, or even during the act of penetrative sex, is an incredibly erotic experience for both lovers. Stopping yourself from crying out as you’re being pleasured is another way to give a kinky aspect to sex.

It’s clear that you can enjoy a kinky sex life which includes bondage even without the use of any sex toys or BDSM accessories. Once you discover a little more about what turns you and your partner on, you can then make some informed choices about whether you’d like to add any helpful extras in the bedroom. This might be in the form of comfortable leather wrist cuffs, a slave type collar or a spanking paddle. You can find out more about bondage sex toys over at my site.

Enjoy discovering the many facets of pleasure than a broad spectrum of sexuality and kink can bring to your sex life. It’s a fantastic journey.

Waiting for my SAS husband Jack to come home safe and sound is always a gut-wrenching, heart-twisting time. I have no idea where he is, what jungle swamp he may be lying out in or desert he might be marching across.

So naturally when he returns to me, our emotions can’t fail to run hot and our lust for each other cranks up to sky-high levels. But the one thing about Jack is he lives for the extreme and seizes the moment. I really should have known what would come of me telling him my wildest fantasies.

Oh, yes, he’s a guy who gets results…and when he brings home his colleague Slider, equally tough, equally rough, the pair of them can’t fail to hit the target. That target happens to be lucky old me and I head off on the ride of my life…

It’s the dreams that are the worst when Jack is away. They start off pleasant enough—me riding a bike in the woods, a picnic spread on a blanket with the sea breeze ruffling my hair, my handsome soldier-lover talking of our plans for the future—but they always turn dark, these dreams. Before I wake there’s a plunge into blackness, an abyss, like falling from a plane without a parachute and flailing for something to hold on to—reaching out and finding nothing.

When I do wake I’m left with this gut-wrenching breathlessness, my heart is racing and my limbs are heavy. Often it’s this one section of the night that lingers with me, it’s a sensation of running but not getting anywhere, putting all of my efforts into reaching Jack, battling uneven terrain, steaming uphill, fighting enemies. But my limbs are leaden, my efforts not rewarded.

I’m standing still.

It doesn’t take a psychologist to decipher the meaning. I’m just a deputy manager of a small town garden centre and I can figure out the symbolism.

When my partner Jack is away on a mission and I’m left at home in our little Cornish cottage, I’m utterly helpless. Oh, not that I can’t get up in the morning and get on with my day. That’s fine. I’m just not part of his terrifying world. If something happens to him, then yes, they’ll tell me eventually, but not until it’s too late, not until it’s over for him. If he needed me, was shot by enemy fire, captured and tortured, I’d never know until his ordeal was history.

Until he was history.

“Morning, Ken,” Mary said, rattling a trolley of begonias past me.

I glanced up from the vegetable seed stock chart I was double-checking. “Hey, Mary. How are you?”

“Great, thanks. Busy though, boss. We’ve just had another delivery.”

I grinned. “Good, now stop slacking and go and earn your money.”

She stuck her tongue out, then smiled and carried on towards the aisle of sweetly scented border plants.

Working at Bedding Beautiful was a godsend. Not only did it take my mind off the scary times when my gorgeous Master was away on duty, it also provided me with a kind of pseudo family. Everyone knew and accepted that I was gay and that I was sometimes teetering on the edge of my nerves. They didn’t know what Jack did exactly, that was confidential information, but they knew he worked away and I was left home alone.

Stock check complete, I headed to the cold drinks machine, slipped in a coin and watched a can of Coke rattle to the bottom tray. I then grabbed a muesli bar from the shelf—I’d never have Jack’s honed physique, if anything I was a little on the skinny side—and flipped open my wallet to pay for the shop purchase.

Hot on the heels of the well-received Gratis: Midwinter Tales anthology, published in December last year, a new collection of quality erotic literature is ready to follow in its footsteps.

Bringing some familiar names, as well as a sprinkling of new authors,Gratis: New Beginningsis a refreshing look at the as yet young year in all its glorious potential. Themes of rejuvenation, redemption and personal growth mingle with the tantalising imagery and intense emotion our existing readers are already familiar with.

Spring is a time perfect for falling in love or lust and the ten authors of Gratis: New Beginningsare keen sweep you up in their erotic fantasies. This collection contains stories by Erzabet Bishop, M.J. Carey, Km Dylan, Jason Jaxx, Kay Jaybee, Livilla Sanders, Hedonist Six, Molly Synthia, Chloe Thurlow, and Elizabeth Woodham.

Story blurbs

Notes from a Blue Bike by Erzabet Bishop.

True love began between the spokes of an ancient blue bicycle. They say you can never go home again…but what if home was there waiting for you all along?

Justine returns to her small home town to save money for school knowing it will never be the same without the one true love that got away. Kate is the owner of the internet sensation The Sugar Whip bakery. Vandals threaten her business, but what will shake her up most of all is coming down the road on an ancient blue bicycle.

Home is where the heart is. If you have the courage to let it in.

The Love That’s Sleeping by KM Dylan.

When her best friend Natasha arrived in Paris to throw her a bachelorette party, fashion model Katie Wolfer knew she was in for a wild ride. But little did she know what an explosive night it would become.

This story is chapter two of “First Lady,” the third novel in K M Dylan’s fictionalized erotic memoirs of a supermodel (the Cult of Beauty series), but it stands on its own.

Countdown by Jason Jaxx.

If you catch me, you can have me: a bewitching call that sends Dave in pursuit of a gorgeous brunette. A journey of twists, turns and raw sexuality that seems destined to end, dashed by its illicit nature. Racing against time and circumstance, does the onset of Spring promise the prospect of love?

Unbuttoning by Kay Jaybee.

Rewarding herself for losing weight by buying a new dress, Laura eagerly awaits her lover’s reaction to her new look. Meanwhile, Jenny has her own plans to prove to Laura that she loves her and her sexy figure, whatever size it is.

Having secretly bought Jenny some very special presents, Laura sets out to see if her girlfriend’s stamina is as strong as ever- one button at a time….

Past Perfect by Livilla Sanders.

Tanya McAvoy is forty five, lesbian and an inveterate sexual predator. Her dalliances are as casual as they are brief. A chance encounter with her first lover brings back memories of the wild passionate night that transformed her life from perfect but frustrated student to voracious hedonist.

Holding On by Hedonist Six.

Five years as a sexchat operator have been more than enough for Charlotte. She can’t wait to leave it all behind: the late nights, the dirty talk and the mouthbreathers on the other end of the line.

But there’s a little hitch, a hiccup in her plan. There’s one client she would rather not quit talking to…

Robbie’s Starlets by Molly Synthia.

How can a man with ready access to young, nubile, and sexually motivated girls possibly remain loyal to his wife? Connie can’t accept that her film producer husband isn’t tempted by his starlets or, at the least, disappointed with the sex life in their marriage. She’s determined to become the perfect seductress for him but how far will she have to go to satisfy him?

Khloya by Elizabeth Woodham.

Multi-layered: a Matryoshka, Chloe Merrywell leads a hedonistic lifestyle. The ache in her promiscuous heart is satisfied by lovers, male and female and by the lustful, debauched, Nicholas Kamarovsky. When Chloe meets army medic, Dan, her approach to life undergoes a transformation. She tries to embrace conventionality and takes steps to eliminate old ties. Will Chloe escape the magnetism of her long-term, older lover, or is she forever destined to be Kamarovsky’s Girl?

Arab Spring by Chloe Thurlow.

In a small village on the edge of the Sahara the girl watches her boyfriend David lose $800 playing backgammon with a dark handsome Arab. David doesn’t have the money to pay and the Arab offers to play one more game, double or nothing: the debt swiped clean if he wins, the girl for the next three hours until midnight if he loses. She agrees, not knowing that three hours on a hot desert night beneath the stars can be an eternity.

So, Daniel, after reading His Hometown Girl, the reader understands more about you and how you became a dairy farmer who produces organic dairy products from ethically treated animals. What can you tell the folks who haven’t read the book yet about your situation?

Growing up on a farm was the best. Ever since I was old enough to carry a bucket, I followed my Pop around the barns, helping. I didn’t like waking up so early to get chores done before school, but it was the only way to work and get the education my parents valued. After I graduated from Cornell’s agricultural program, I came home to take over the farm when my father’s Parkinson’s got too bad for him to manage on his own. I’d learned a lot of new methods and I put them into practice when I got home, like using natural alternatives to pesticides and not using hormones. I also upgraded the barns and put in a rotating, circular milker to make things more efficient. Because of that, I’m able to charge more money per pound of milk. For once, my family is not in debt and we’re turning a profit. I’m trying hard to convince my cash-strapped neighbors to join in a co-op with me and make these upgrades. I believe in the farming way of life. It’s shaping your life, molding your future, with your own two hands. You’re your own boss. I value my independence, and I’ll work hard work to keep it. Mostly, farming is a tradition that goes back hundreds of years in Cedar Bay, and it needs to be preserved. Neighbors helping neighbors, the community coming together to celebrate and mourn together means we are all a family. We need to work together to stay together.

Your sister, Sue, was a seriously funny lady! And very smart. Why do you think she won’t go back to Princeton and finish her dissertation on Child Psychology?

My little sister is the most stubborn person I know- besides me. She wants to prove she knows best how to treat autistic children and doesn’t want to present findings using a method her advisor suggested. When Jodi returned home with her son, Tyler, Sue figured she had the perfect chance to use her experimental methods to help the boy talk again. And that’s a good thing. I’d much rather she’d spend her time working with Tyler instead of in the kitchen or mooning over our new farm hand. We’ve had too many burnt pot roasts and potatoes as hard as rocks- or as we call them- ‘Sue’s specialty’. Of course that means I’ve got to do the cooking, but since it relaxes me, and I get a meal cooked all the way through, I don’t mind. Still, I wish I had someone by my side. Farming can by lonely.

You had strong connection with Jodi growing up. Do you think you’ll ever be close again?

Jodi Lynn used to drive me nuts as a boy- still does. She’s smart, pretty and always sure she knows best. I couldn’t help, growing up, wanting to best her every chance I got. Seeing that line appear between her blue eyes always made me smile. At least she knew who I was, even if she seemed like she hated me. Except one summer, the year we worked together after her father’s accident, she kissed me while we were berry picking. That changed everything. I wanted to hold her every chance I got after that, but we had to keep our relationship a secret because our family’s were feuding. My parents loaned her family a machine that mutilated her father’s arm and ended his career as a farmer. The machine was ruined and the cost of replacing it was more than my family could handle without going under. Both blamed each other, but Jodi and I grew closer and closer. Then she overheard me admit that I did resent her family. She accused me of hiding my feelings and pitying her. I couldn’t deny any of it, especially since my mother couldn’t take our financial troubles and was leaving. A part of me was mad at Jodi’s family. But I still loved Jodi. Wished I’d told her. Before I had a chance to explain, she left and never came home again until ten years later.

Were you surprised about how willing Jodi was to return home and purchase her neighbor’s farms for her employer, essentially destroying the community you both grew up in?

Yes and No. I knew that Jodi wanted nothing to do with me or Cedar Bay since she never sent word or came back all those years. Since her dad was hurt in a farming accident, I understood why she thought farming wasn’t the best job. I guessed she thought she might be doing her old neighbors a favor by getting them out of it. But she forgot how special Cedar Bay is and it was my job to remind her of that. I picked her up at Burlington airport and gave her the scenic drive to her Aunt’s house on Lake Champlain. I drove her nuts talking about all the old places and when she reminded me weren’t kids, battling like we used to, I told her that I agreed, because this was bigger. It was war. I wasn’t going to let her get away with destroying a community that had existed for centuries. We have traditions that go far back. In the same way, Jodi and I had a long history and the more time we spent battling each other to win over the farmers- I wanted them to join my co-op and she wanted them to sell out- the closer we got again. It was hard to fight my feelings because she made me forget she was the enemy. Someone that’d broken my heart before and would, I suspected, do it again.

How did you feel about Jodi’s son, Tyler?

Tyler’s an incredible kid. He doesn’t have much to say, but a lot of people who talk a lot don’t have much to say either. He’s got a good sense of humor and he wants to help out on the farm. Kind of reminds me of me. He’s autistic which makes it hard for him to control how he reacts to things, but on a farm, we don’t have to behave any certain way that doesn’t suit us. In fact, the farm suits Tyler. His temper tantrums disappear whenever he’s here, spending time with Sue. He does her therapy which is a lot of hands on work with the animals. He’s really an amazing boy and it kills me that his father abandoned him. If he were mine, I’d be the proudest dad in the world.

When did you realize you still loved Jodi?

I’d like to say it was when she drove the tractor into the strawberry fields, Tyler on her lap. That really impressed me. Or when she helped me birth a breech calf and got her foot fractured in the process without complaining. Maybe it was the moment she stepped out of the terminal and I saw her again for the first time. It felt like a ton of bricks had been dumped on my chest. But no. I never stopped loving Jodi Lynn. Never will.

When she admitted that she loved you, did you hear anything else or were you stuck on that? I’m glad she said it again!

I’m glad too. I couldn’t believe it and needed to hear her say it twice. After everything we’d been through, past and present, she realized she loved me and Cedar Bay. Enough to give us a second chance. I’m the luckiest man for it.

*Thanks so much for inviting me to do this fun interview! It was terrific 🙂 – Karen

*****

Blurb:

He’d always managed to best her…

Jodi Chapman will do whatever it takes to get top care for her autistic son. If that means going home and convincing local farmers to sell their land, so be it. Even if her biggest opponent, childhood rival Daniel Gleason, is equally determined to convince farmers to buy into his co-op plan. And he’s not playing fair.

Facing off against Daniel is the last thing Jodi wants. The attraction that’s always fueled their competitiveness is as strong as ever and just as distracting. But with both their futures on the line, and years of distrust between them, how can they ever be on the same side?

Karen Rock has adored romance since receiving Harlequin Presents books from her grandmother each summer. She formed her Young Adult writing partnership, J.K. Rock- pseudonym for the CAMP BOYFRIEND series, with her sister-in-law and Blaze author, Joanne Rock in 2011. When Karen heard of a call for submissions to Heartwarming, Harlequin’s latest line, she was inspired by the possibilities of writing unforgettable, deeply romantic, tender love stories that mothers would feel comfortable sharing with their daughters. Since then, her first Harlequin, WISH ME TOMORROW came out in September, 2013 and her next novel HIS HOMETOWN GIRL comes out in March, 2014 with three more releases expected this year.

When she’s not writing, Karen loves scouring estate sales for vintage books, cooking her grandmother’s family recipes, hiking the ‘high peaks’, and redesigning her gardens. She lives in the Adirondack Mountain region with her husband, daughter, and two Cavalier King cocker spaniels who have yet to understand the concept of “fetch” though they know a lot about love. For more information about Karen’s upcoming books, check out her website at http://www.karenrock.com, Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/karenrockwrites or follow her on twitter at http://www.twitter.com/karenrock5 . She’d love to hear from you!

Those who say online friendships don’t count/ aren’t real/are of less value than others, are – in my book – wrong.

I was quite late to Facebook; I joined in 2007,abandoning MySpace along with the droves, but for at least five years I had few friends and posted irregularly to say the least. I was even slower off the mark with Twitter, only joining because my first publisher suggested it. However, I took to Twitter like the proverbial duck and enjoyed hours of chatting and joking and information sharing with my new Besties. My family might have enjoyed this period a little less, but, hey, there are always winners and losers. As my love affair with Twitter grew in intensity, ironically, I fell in love with Facebook too. Like most of us, my love is not of a fixed capacity.

There were tweeps I spoke with more than others, and it wasn’t long before plans to meet face to face were hatched. I have become ‘real’ friends with over half a dozen people I met online and ‘real’ acquaintances with many, many more. Of course, geography has played its part. I’ve not hooked up with tweeps in Australia, the US or Croatia, though I do know those who when travelling have done this, and perhaps one day, I might too.

I consider myself lucky to have so many good, solid friends, real and virtual. Not everyone does. My lead in Public Battles, Private Wars, Mandy, has enemies as well as friends and she finds both in the most unexpected quarters.

Writers are a friendly bunch, supportive and kind, rarely competitive, and forums like Facebook and Twitter suit most of us very well indeed. I met the lovely KD on Twitter and I’ve met her in real life (just as lovely there). So, here’s what I say to those who say virtual friendships are shallow: Don’t be a Twerp, come join the party.

Public Battles, Private Wars is published by Accent Press on 27 March.

Yorkshire 1983

Miner’s wife Mandy is stuck in a rut. Her future looks set and she wants more. But Mandy can’t do anything other than bake and raise her four children. Husband Rob is a good looking drinker, content to spend his days in the small town where they live.

When a childhood friend – beautiful, clever Ruth – and her Falklands war hero husband, Dan, return to town, their homecoming is shrouded in mystery. Mandy looks to Ruth for inspiration, but Ruth isn’t all she appears.

Conflict with the Coal Board turns into war and the men come out on strike. The community and its way of life is threatened. Mandy abandons dreams of liberation from the kitchen sink and joins a support group. As the strike rumbles on relationships are pushed to the brink, and Mandy finds out who her true friends are.