"Well, his parents are pretty normal -- they just do weird things," Muniz, 14, says of Malcolm's nutty nuclear unit with no last name.

"I do think lots of families are like this. Actually, someone did tell me that their aunt used to answer the door topless. And people do have to shave their backs, I guess, because they're hairy, and when they wear clothes it itches.

"Really I think my parents are good," Muniz says, speaking as Malcolm. "But they're just not that smart."

So goes the hook of Malcolm in the Middle, yet another tubular view of twisted middle-class family life that aims to please young viewers with its astute-kids, addled-parents attitude.

Plus heaps of coming-of-age angst that Malcolm, 13, delivers directly to the camera in earnest monologues.

The show's theme song says it: "Yes, no, maybe, I don't know. Can you repeat the question? You're not the boss of me now, and you're not so big. Life is unfair."

Still, on Malcolm, kids are definitely the master race. Muniz's Malcolm is perpetually puzzled by his parents' off-key antics.

Muniz: "I think he really likes his family most of the time, but when they're really weird he hates them and he wants a better one."

As it happens, Malcolm is a gifted child, IQ 165, amazingly agile at math. His muddled mom works at a grocery store, and Hal -- "well, he has a suit and tie on but we don't really know what he does."

Of course, Malcolm has his klutzy moments. He looks small -- "I'm really the size of a 9-year-old," Muniz says of himself -- but he's a testosterone-tossed teen just trying to figure out the girl thing.

Malcolm's sibs aren't much help.

Oldest brother Francis (Christopher Kennedy Masterson) is away at military school for disciplinary reasons. Next-older brother Reese (Justin Berfield) usually acts out before he thinks. Youngest bro Dewey (Erik Per Sullivan) "thinks he can talk to dogs."

Weirdness aside, "Malcolm is me," Muniz says.

Muniz, who commuted from his New Jersey home to Los Angeles to shoot Malcolm, is obviously one bright kid. He started acting at 8 after he saw his sister, Cristina, in a school play.

"The lights and costumes attracted me."

His resume includes roles in TV movies To Dance with Olivia and What the Deaf Man Heard, the theatrical film Little Man, a coming movie, My Dog Skip, and the Horton Foote play The Death of Papa. He has also appeared on Spin City, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Silk Stalkings and Another World.

But "I totally think like I'm normal," he says. "I don't put myself bigger or better than anyone else. I'm home schooled because I went back to regular school in the seventh grade and I was actually going to quit acting because I missed 30 days one marking period. They were getting pretty mad. So I think home schooling is better for me.

"I want to go to college and study geography. I play all sports, and I have friends all over the country. I love acting, but my mom says, 'If you don't think it's fun we'll stop.'

"But I love being on-set and going like, 'Today I got chased by a dog -- yeah!' I mean I'd rather do a really cheesy commercial than sit around doing nothing."

Right now Muniz is doing promotional tours for Skip and waiting to see if Fox extends Malcolm beyond the 13 episodes already produced.

Meanwhile, Disney has asked him to voice the character Meatball Finklestein in an animated kid show in development.

"He looks like a meatball, and he has no friends except French Fry and Tater Tot."

If Muniz seems well-adjusted and level-headed, it's unclear how alter ego Malcolm will turn out -- given his flippy family circumstances.

Muniz: "He will grow up and become this lawyer or something. Actually I would like him to become the Clippers' owner 'cause the Clippers are my team.

"OK, I don't really think Malcolm would want to be a lawyer but he'll be something good 'cause he's so smart. Like a computer whiz -- but not Bill Gates."