Monday, June 17, 2013

Ever since the day i got the call telling me i would be the father of a baby girl I immediately began thinking about how i would raise her. I thought about how i would go about instilling our values effectively, and how i would avoid the mistakes the adults in my life had made when i was a child.

I also began looking at every little girl and even the women i saw on the street, or on television, to deconstruct exactly how this little person grew up to become a girl. Since I've never been a little girl its hard to know exactly what things a little girl likes but i certainly do my best to be supportive, and at this age (15 months) theres not much difference between the two genders. Soon however, it will be time for toys from one of two sections in the Toys R Us store, the boys side or the girls side.

When you walk into the girls side you're immediately overcome by all the PINK and the princess dolls, princess costumes, princess balls, princess shoes, princess chairs, in short: princess themed EVERYTHING. I'm sure most people are asking, what exactly is wrong with a princess themed toilet seat? The short answer is: nothing. The longer answer is, everything, and heres why.

I consider myself a feminist and to me that means a woman has carte blanche over her life decisions from the menial ones, to the major ones, so i fully support my daughter (and any girl) who wants to play with princess dolls, or pretend they are a princess and that one day their prince will come to rescue them, but i don't support pushing said interest in princess culture on my daughter. Especially considering that, from the ground up, its about as anti-feminist as it gets. Waiting to be rescued by a man? just, no.

So what is a feminist dad to do? Well, i haven't gotten that far yet, for now i'll supply her with all types of toys but in time i'm sure she will begin to develop a preference for one thing over another. As of now she loves Mickey mouse and Doc Mcstuffins, so we're all good....but i can already see it...Madison comes home from school with a princess doll hidden in her bag, it falls out, and i scream in horror....THE HORROR!

For the shorter version of why im not fond of princess culture, this image has made its way around the internet, for quite some time actually. I wouldn't take it too seriously, however it does make some good points.

Monday, May 20, 2013

We all knew it had to happen sooner or later, a babysitter. Eventually we would HAVE to find someone to watch the LO on the rare occasion we wanted to set foot outside of the house to see a movie, go on a date, or just get some fresh air. It was extra difficult for us as we don't live near any family and the majority of our friends live pretty far away in the city and don't have children so we were pretty much out in the cold for getting help from anyone we knew personally. Thankfully i do have one friend here in my area who can watch her but we needed an additional babysitter for when she wasn't available.

So after much soul searching we finally settled on Care.com. I was highly averse to finding a babysitter on a website as its so impersonal and you don't know who or what you're getting, but we were at our wits end and needed to find someone.

After dozens and dozens of emails with local people we finally found some local people who are experienced and had good references, which means we can finally leave the house without baby in tow.

Now if i can just leave the house without calling 900 times to make sure she hasn't fallen in our non-existent backyard pool, or run into the middle of the expressway, true its about 2 miles from our house, but hey it COULD happen.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

I've always thought meatloaf was a lazy dinner option for when there was no time or resources for anything else. Then i made my first batch of the stuff....i was in heaven.

I've made this recipe for the past two weeks, last week i came down with a 24 hour stomach bug which hit JUST as i finished chopping the onions. It came on so fast that i could barely get it in the oven before almost passing out while standing upright. Obviously i didn't get to eat any, so i made it again last night and this time i absolutely devoured it.

I always try to use fresh ingredients and with a recipe like this as there aren't a lot of bells and whistles and each ingredient really shows in the final product. I'm VERY loose with my measurements, so feel free to modify this as you go and add or subtract amounts of things based on taste.

Start off by preheating your oven to 375

I use enough for a small batch as that's the only size my grocer sells, so this is for approximately 3/4 lb of ground turkey.

Loosely chop up one jalapeno, 1 small onion, half a bell pepper (i use red), and add them to a bowl.

To that, add one beaten egg, half a cup of bread crumbs, and your ground turkey

chop up a few sprigs of parsley, roughly 1 TBSP, and add that to the mix.

Finally add about a half tsp of cayenne, 1.5 tsp of salt, and 1.5 tsp of pepper (fresh ground if possible)

Mash it all up nicely then turn out into a baking pan, spray with cooking spray if needed. Remember this is for sandwiches so it needs to be nice and uniform in shape.

Last take about 1/4 cup of ketchup and put it in a tiny bowl. Add 1 tsp of cayenne pepper and mix thoroughly then spread uniformly across the top of the loaf. I would also suggest making more for putting on the sandwiches if your as big a fan of tomato sauce as our family is.

Then toss in the oven for roughly 35-40 minutes or until the internal temp reads 170 degrees.

Slice up and serve on a freshly warmed bun with pepper jack cheese (FYI this is almost as important as the meatloaf) as the flavors balance quite nicely.

Tuesday, May 7, 2013

We had just finished a walk through downtown Key West in the blistering and unforgiving heat of a late August day when we happened upon a little food stall with a french transplant who made the most delightful sandwiches. What follows is my adaptation of her recipe as I felt there was no way I would be able to survive without ever tasting the best tuba recipe I had ever tried.

Unfortunately (for the reader) i'm generally not one for measuring so the entire recipe is 'to taste'. Im a seafood junkie and id even go so far to as to call myself a tuna snob....if its not well made i just wont be able to eat it, so i promise you this recipe is well worth your time.

Begin with canned white albacore tuna, I prefer the type in water as the other additives will have a bit of oil and you don't want oil overload.

Separate the chunks so they're manageable, then chop up some marinated artichokes and add them in.

Next chop up some capers unless theyre too small, keep in mind the salt content as you add them. If you like it saltier add more and you can even add a bit of the juice. Or if you're a caper addict like me, you can just dump the entire thing in, i'm joking of course....

Or am i?

Next add some black olives, canned is fine, slice them up if they aren't pre-sliced. I tend to go light on the olives as they can be overpowering.

And.....

PARMESAN!! Add oodles of it, don't skimp as it really warms up the flavor.And if that wasn't enough lastly add some Mayo and even though it is to taste I would still suggest doing it sparingly. Sometimes i even add it as im putting it on the bread so that i dont have to add it to the mix...it will store better and longer that way.

Finish it off with a sprinkling of fresh lemon juice, freshly cracked pepper, and some Parmesan chips (if you so choose) Serve on toasted sourdough.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Ever since the day we brought her home one of the biggest things we have had to think about was what we would do with her during the day. Pre-child it seemed like such an easy question to answer, take care of her during the day at home until kindergarten of course! I mean, why pay a stranger to do something i can do for free? Not to mention i can raise her the way we want to and i can also oversee her nutrition and have no fears for how well she is being treated in whatever day care i decided to try.

Then the first tantrum happened. Well i shouldn't say first tantrum as it wasnt a tantrum, it was more of a meltdown because i had dared leave her alone and go to the other room without her. Eventually i found out that daycare is not only a necessity for parents who work, but for children to experience the world as it is away from their parents.

Until we do get her into daycare i do everything i can to ensure she gets time with other kids, Gymboree, the play center at the mall, the park, but aside from leaving her with her daddy (im Papa) she still doesnt get time away from me.

Next step: Dropping her off for some time with our new babysitter! Lets hope this is a success.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

If youve seen my reviews before, you know im scathingly honest about whether or not something works. Usually there is good and there is bad, in the case of the Diaper Dekor Plus Pail its a case of a true 50/50.

Lets begin with the good:

It looks nice, well, as nice as a diaper garbage pail could possibly look without spending a ton of money. It also holds in the smell until it begins to get full to capacity, or unless the little one has particularly pungent presents for me. Its relatively stable and can be locked so the baby doesn't get tempted to try to climb inside and do some digging, however its not perfect which brings me to the less than stellar elements of the item....

Now for the not so good:

Its difficult to get into, i could overlook this when i have a nice big wet diaper and i dont mind futzing around with it (oh yes, i went full Yiddish on you there), but when its something more, erm....substantial its impossible to do without first unlocking the entire top and propping it open in order to get the diaper in. You see that little squarish opening? Thats what the diaper has to fit into and its a trap door with a spring on it.....so even if you push it open with one hand you still cant get the diaper in without getting poo on the sides.

So typically our changed go:

1) Sniff

2) If dirty prop pail open and get everything ready
3) Give baby something to play with so she keeps her hands out of the soiled spots
4) Remove/wipe/set aside
5) new diaper/powder/yada, yada, yada (ok that ones not Yiddish but, close enough)
6) Then the process of dealing with the pail....Pull the entire top off (which makes the built up smell come wafting out.WHOOOO!)
7) Insert diaper very carefully and replace lid
8) Wash diaper/liner if necessary (we use cloth diapers with disposable inserts)

If its just a wet diaper usually the wipes just end up propped between the lid and the trap door until i get the chance to insert them fully. The trap door is REALLY that small.

And my least favorite, however not a deal breaker if i had to repurchase, it uses proprietary bags. Which means you cant go to the corner store and buy some trash bags when it runs out....you have to buy THEIR brand. They do last a long time though and they arent ridiculously expensive, just be sure to read the instructions as its slightly complicated the first time around.

In short it works, but its a pain to use and if you have Man Hands (Seinfeld reference #2) like myself the trapdoor is null and void.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Before I had a baby I thought the hardest part would be the
diaper changes, or possibly the feedings, nothing could've prepared me for what
was to trump my biggest baddest fears…..other parents.

From the day I stepped out of that Sierra Vista hospital
with Madison ive been subject to one of the following responses by other
parents:

1)Where is the mother? (This is the overwhelmingly
largest question im asked)

2)You’re taking her out by yourself?

3)Do you need me to hold the baby for you while
you do (whatever im currently attempting to do)

Even worse than the above three, just yesterday I heard the
cringe worthy “GOOD JOB DAD!!” because I had dared to take her out in her push
car. At times it’s enough to make me
want to throw in the towel and not leave the house until she is able to drive,
or at the very least tote around a female companion to quell the constant
stares, questions, and assumptions.

Perhaps the most irritating time was when I was at the
airport flying alone with her at approximately the age of 9 months. In a thick
creole accent the bag check guy asked “Where’s the mama??” to which I replied “It’s
just her and myself this trip”. His reply: “Yeah, likely story”, as if a male
is incapable of taking care of a baby.

At first I used to offer an explanation, that my husband and
I had adopted her so there is no “mother”, or rather that I was the one who
filled that role, but that became too time consuming. Next I began to just say,
“I’m the mother”, which of course opens a whole other line of questions and
stares. So now I just smile and nod and leave it at that, it works well for me
as people really don’t need to know my life story.

And when I stop to dissect why questions 1, 2, and 3 are so bothersome,
aside from the obvious that I have to answer the same question yet again, I can
scarcely blame the people asking the question. Nosey-ness is a bad trait,
however it’s a trait we as humans are all cursed with, so I cannot hold that
against them. Its that people assume a male can’t put his bumbling aside for a
few hours a day in order to take their child out.

There is another layer to the story and one that is not
completely lost on me even in my day to day irritations with the outside
world. Stereotypes, however bad they may
be, usually have a root in reality and the truth is many men would NOT be good
at of taking care of a baby, but then again neither would many women. The sexism that tells women that they are baby
machines and incapable of anything else, is the same sexism that tells men they
are laugh-worthy, bumbling idiots and are only good for bringing home the bacon….or
in my case, the vegetarian strips.

Moral of the story? Sexism hurts us all. Don’t assume next
time you see a man with a baby and a
cart of groceries that the mom is home sick in bed and he is ‘stuck’ with the
kids for the afternoon. Maybe he is the caregiver in the family, or maybe he Is the ONLY family the child has.
Before you ask him about his life story or ask (as a complete stranger) to hold
his baby so he doesn't spill his beer all over it, or drop it in front of a
moving car, you just enjoy the sight of someone breaking gender stereotypes.

Monday, April 22, 2013

One of the main staples of a country kitchen is atmosphere, how you feel when you walk in and sit down. And what better way to establish atmosphere than a heaping pile of fresh buttermilk biscuits right out of the oven.

How do you make them you ask?

Its easy, and then again its not. I had to do trial and error multiple times before i worked out the kinks to figure out exactly what it needed to be perfect.

These are the basic tips that can give you mountainous flaky buttery biscuits.

1) Think cold, think FROZEN, the colder your ingredients are the better it will come out. I freeze my buttermilk when i get it so that when im ready to go i just pop them out of the trays and toss them in the microwave until they are just melted enough to work with (but still COLD!), Its also good because it makes your buttermilk last a long time if you don't use it every day. I also freeze my butter, when its time to use it i cut it with a large knife into small bits as fast as i can. Additionally i keep my flour refrigerated, not a necessity but it doesn't hurt.

2) Don't touch it more than you have to. I suppose this goes back to number one, but thats how important it is. Cut in the ingredients and use tools instead of hands to incorporate, the heat from your hands can melt the butter. When i cut in my (frozen) butter i barely cut it in enough to be incorporated. you can actually see chunks of butter in the dough and this is good.

3) Make sure it's rolled THICK before you cut it, at least 3/4 of an inch. If not you wont get that rise that you need for it to be a flaky biscuit. after you combine the wet and dry ingredients do a few quick turns on a floured surface to get it ready to be rolled and cut.

4) Use a cast iron skillet. Anyone who uses them can tell you, they are magic. They make everything taste better, and no thats not an exaggeration. If you put them on too thin of a surface to bake the bottom will cook too fast and they will be too hard on the bottom.

That's basically it, whether you use this recipe or another if you follow those four tips you will be good to go.

4 cups of flour

2 cups of buttermilk

4 teaspoons of baking powder

1 teaspoon of baking soda

1-2 teaspoons of salt

2 sticks of butter (unsalted)

Pre-heat oven to 375

combine the dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl

cut in the butter using a pastry cutter if you dont have one you can use two knives. (if you use frozen butter cut it into small pieces before adding to the flour)

add the buttermilk

Gather ingredients and turn dough onto floured surface

Do a (very) few quick kneads until it is the right elasticity to roll out and cut.

Roll to 1" thick (very important)

Cut using a cup or biscuit cutter make sure they are large (3 inches across)

Place in cast iron skillet, or pyrex dish if you dont have a cast iron skillet.

One of my favorite things used to be spending time working in the yard., this was when i actually had time to spend doing anything except change diapers and clean up baby toys. Now since we have moved into a new home i have a nice little plot of land in the back with just enough space (and sunlight) to do a comfortable size garden.

Apparently the house sat for at least one and a half years before we moved in and the previous owners put very little time and effort into taking care of it so its been quite a chore getting it ready for fruits and veggies.

This weekend consisted of digging up every little rock in the garden (and there were more than quite a few LARGE ones as well), tilling it, putting down compost, then fresh topsoil. After that was done in went the plants!

We've got strawberries, and every variety of heirloom tomato you could want. Next came building an outdoor compost bin. It went surprisingly well considering i had no idea what i was doing. I just saved a palette from a previous delivery and then stopped by home depot to snag one of their. A few hours of banging later plus i built a nice little frame. All thats needed is a some strong chicken wire then its all done.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Its been a harrowing experience, seeing her start to walk that is....but milestones are always bittersweet. My biggest fear is her running off and getting hit by a truck (thanks Pet Semetary), or running into the corner of a table, but all attempts to prevent the inevitable have failed.

So here we are.

I suppose i should be happy, the next step is getting a job and taking out the trash right? Based on my observations so far as the all powerful all knowing "Papa", i would guess she would excel as a food smearer, or possibly as a water spiller. Whatever she chooses ill be right there cheering her on!

Sunday, March 31, 2013

I've felt a bit guilty over the past year for not making each event a grandiose budget busting newspaper worthy affair. But when i stop and think logically about it i feel better in the end, after all she wont remember most of these days and most of the money + time spent would be for us.

Today will be no different.

When i was a kid and had my first Easter with my adoptive mother i remember waking up to a big basket of toys and goodies at the foot of the bed. Even though she probably wont remember it i want to have a similar experience to me so I bought her first Easter basket and filled it with a few 1 year old friendly items.

For eggs i just used vinegar and red cabbage which i then boiled and placed in the refrigerator overnight so the color would set then deepen.

I was going to use turmeric as well for some yellow ones but i only had so much time on my hands.

Anyways if your interested in giving it a try the basic instructions are below:

Cut up some red cabbage, i used half a head and sliced it into smaller pieces so the color would really seep out quickly.

Add your eggs to room temp. water, a 1 year old can only eat so many so i used four.

Then 2-3 tbsp of white vinegar and 1 quart of water, or slightly more if you have a lot of cabbage.

Add the cabbage then turn on he heat til it boils. Let it boil for 10 minutes then turn it off, let it sit til cool. at this point transfer to the refrigerator overnight. In the morning you will have nice blue eggs waiting for you're L.O. to eat, hunt, and enjoy however he/she sees fit. Just be sure to let air dry as the color can be wiped off until it is dry, you can also use a hairdryer on low (or no if you have the option) heat.

Monday, March 25, 2013

As we sit here, early for a late flight, I'm forced to think about the lessons I've learned today:

1. Motion sickness spitup smells worse than regular day to day spit-up. MUCH worse.
2. Always, Always, Always pack a spare set of clothes for the baby in the diaper bag.
3. Boiled crawfish are better on Fridays.
4. Discount bins at drug stores rock for finding cheap toys.
5. Vacations are draining and only fun for the baby.
6. Apparently a bottle of orange juice next to a bottle of formula make the TSAs spidey senses tingle.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

That we go to the doctor for more shots. I feel as though i hear taps being played in the background whenever i get up on a day that includes doctor visits for the baby. Unsurprisingly Madison HATES shots....as do I since I'm the one who has to force her to get them and then calm her cries of "Waaaaah" which loosely translates from babynese to "When i'm sixteen i'm so going to get even by crashing your car into a tree."

Crazy eyes AKA chipmunk and me at the doctor.

Still its one of those things that HAS to be done, and for those who aren't parents yet I've got some bad news, they get them every 3 months. Even worse is that after 2 or 3 times simply bringing them to the office they know whats coming so the screams of horror begin immediately.

Tip: One way to keep her from going into a frenzy post shot is to reassure her and give her a bottle. Cel phones and keys are another way if you're short on formula/milk, anything to get their mind off of it.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

First birthdays only come around once a lifetime so i figured what better way to celebrate than to make one from scratch here at home. After all, the store bought ones are so impersonal right? Plus i had been dying to break in my new stand mixer!

Set aside and in a separate bowl cream together 1.5 sticks (3/4 cups) of room temperature unsalted butter and 2 cups of sugar. You'll know its done once it looks light and fluffy and you cant see granules of sugar.

Grate 1 teaspoon of lemon zest and add to the mixture. Beware, lemon graters and thumbs dont play well together....

Add in 1/3 cup of lemon juice to the wet mixture. To that beat in 4 eggs one at a time, it should be nice and yellow when you're done.

With your mixer set to a very low speed sift in your dry ingredients a bit at a time and 1 cup of buttermilk. Alternate adding in dry and wet about 1/4 of each at a time.

After its all combined gently fold in (by hand using a spatula) 2 cups of blueberries.

Next fill an three 8 inch round nonstick cake pans with 1/3 of the mixture and bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes or until its done and a toothpick, inserted into the center comes out clean.I sifted flour on mine to help it come out clean but you can also use cooking spray or nothing at all if you fancy.

Let cool completely then transfer to a wire rack until you are ready to ice and stack.

Now, the FROSTING!!!

Cream 2 sticks of room temp unsalted butter in a large bowl then with the mixer on its lowest speed slowly add 1 lb of powdered confectioners sugar, 1/2 teaspoon of vanilla extract and 2 tablespoons of room temperature whole milk.

Once done, place your first layer on a cake tray or plate, ice the top of it, then place the second tier on top. Repeat to the top then ice the sides. Be sure its cooled completely as it will make the icing thin out and drip.

When done, decorate the top with remaining blueberries and if its your first birthday, oodles of sparkly candles.

Im an earth nut AND a gardening nut which means anything that combines recycling and beefing up my plants is an automatic no brainer. Since we are in a new home and my outdoor compost heap hasn't been built yet i wanted a way to start my heap indoors that didnt stink up the joint.

Then, she stepped into my life.....

The Norpro kitchen compost crock is an odorless way to save all your kitchen scraps and turn them into compost and it doesn't look too shabby to boot. I cook most if not all of my food from scratch, I mean, I even feel guilty for using pre-made pie crusts.....THE SHAME! So this usually means lots of rinds and berries and stems and shavings with nowhere to go except the trash. This solved that problem, it eats a good amount of trash without using red wigglers (i dont think there would be enough oxygen for worms to survive in there) and once its done you can go straight to your garden or flower pots with the brown gold known as compost.

The black thing on top is the air filter to keep all the methane smells at bay.

I highly suggest this one for any gardeners or even if you just have house plants and want to keep them in best of health.

For some info on HOW to compost, check out this link, or the book "Compost" by Ken Thompson its not particularly difficult but there are a few things to keep in mind: acidity, moisture level, temperature, worms if you choose to use them, nitrogen levels. It may sound confusing but its very easy after you do a wee bit of reading.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

There are a few things i will never forget in this lifetime, the birth of my daughter, my wedding day, the first time i set foot on foreign soil, and the first time i sunk my teeth into Dominican fried chicken. It was a great little Dominican restaurant called El Conuco complete with live dancing, lots of great music and side dishes that made me feel complete. A word of advice for travelling abroad, if you like to cook and enjoy the local cuisine buy spices at the local market to bring back with you....many times you cannot find the same things at home and they often cost little to nothing by comparison when you buy them overseas.

But i digress......CHICKEN!!!

the above served a home, complete with all the fixins'

Since i cant afford to fly to Santo Domingo every time i want to get my fix i decided to make it at home, what follows is the recipe that will turn you into an immediate Chicharrones de Pollo addict.

First you will need to make your marinade, its really the key to the whole conglomeration:

First take some garlic, about 4 cloves should do.

To easily access the garlic press down on it with a knife and it will pop right out of its little shell.

Then mince it or use a garlic press and add to a large bowl. Then get your limes ready, you will need enough lime juice for a cup so i would recommend at least 10-12 depending on how juicy they are. Roll them with the palm of your hand to get them to release their juices before you cut into them.

Add your cut up chicken to the marinade, i use both breasts and legs with bone in but you can do whatever type you want. Typically when you go to a restaurant in Dominican republic and order this dish you will get legs that have been fried and chopped into pieces but since my household prefers white meat i add in breast pieces.

Traditions-shmaditions...

After it has sat for at least a few hours, (not overnight though as you dont want the lime juice to turn the chicken into a ceviche) you can begin to make your dry ingredients which you will dredge the chicken pieces in before tossing them in your fryer (or pot of hot oil).

Combine 2 cups of flour, 2 Tsp of paprika, and Salt and pepper to taste to a paper bag. I only had a leftover diesel bag which, while nice looking in its own right, is absolutely horrible for dredging chicken as it all came out of the sides. If you dont have a paper bag you can just put it in a bowl but the paper bag absorbs some of the moisture and makes for a better even coating. Shake it up in the bag, then grab some tongs.

set your deep fryer to 350, or if your using a pot like me you may have to just do it by eye and check each piece as it comes out.

Drop in 3 or 4 pieces at a time keeping in mind larger pieces and pieces with bones will take longer to cook than boneless breast pieces.

When its done it should look like this....Serve with tostones a very easy recipe can be found here, and some nice white rice + beans.