Herpes Case A Mystery

ANN LANDERS

February 12, 1997|ANN LANDERS - Syndicated Columnist

Dear Ann Landers: I am a 40-year-old woman who has been married for 20 years. I had a boyfriend in high school but was sexually inactive for two years before I met and married ``Paul.'' I've been completely faithful to him.

I have recently been treated for genital herpes, and I can't get a straight answer from my doctor about where and how I contracted this virus. Paul doesn't seem to be infected.

My doctor and Paul have accepted the possibility that this virus may have been dormant in my body for more than 20 years _ since before I married. The books I have read say the incubation period is as short as a week. I can't help but suspect that Paul has been unfaithful. If I didn't get this from Paul, how did I get it? And if it's from sexual contact, could it have remained dormant in my body all this time? _ Devastated in the East

Dear D.: Because Paul is not infected and isn't accusing you of fooling around, give him high marks for being so trusting.

It is entirely likely that the herpes virus has been dormant in your body all this time. For more information, write American Social Health Association, Herpes Resource Center, ASHA/HRC, PR72, P.O. Box 13827, Research Triangle Park, NC 27709, and enclose $1 for postage and handling. (Internet: http://sunsite.unc.edu/ASHA/)

Dear Ann Landers: My husband and I rent a unit in a quadplex. We don't object to noise. We are over the garage and are accustomed to it.

The problem is our new neighbors. They gave a party and the bass on their stereo was turned up to the max, and we could feel the vibrations through the floor. The neighbors on the other side spoke to them at 10 p.m. I called at 1:30 a.m. The stereo kept blasting until 3 in the morning.

I don't want to call the police or make trouble. Also, I'm not sure of my rights. They own their unit, and we only rent. How should we handle this? _ Sound-Bitten in California

Dear Bitten: Why not invite all three other families in for a Sunday brunch? Don't mention the loud music. If the disturbance continues, tell the offending neighbors and ask for their cooperation. After having been guests in your home, they will, I'm sure, make an effort to be more considerate. Write to Ann Landers, P.O. Box 11562, Chicago, IL 60611-0562.