Jay Leno Transcript - March 2, 2005

Jay: [joking with the first guest, Glenn Close] You know, Glenn, you took so much time, we had to bump Gerard! Good night, everyone! [audience screams hysterically] No no, my next guest is a terrific actor from Scotland. You know him as the Phantom in "Phantom of the Opera." His new movie, "Dear Frankie," opens March 4th. Please welcome Gerard Butler. [audience applauds and screams, Gerry comes out and does a little dance] Have you two just met? [audience keeps screaming, not allowing anyone to talk]

Gerry: I'm going to have to say something! [motions for the audience to tone it down] Yeah, we just met, in the dressing room. I just wanted-

Glenn: I was juggling, wasn't I?

G: She- can I just say, we had a full conversation that lasted over five minutes and she never dropped a ball. [audience laughs] She was just like, "[singing] Doo doo doo doo doo" [imitates juggling] and I watched her [during her interview] and Iím like, "What happened?!" [audience laughs]

J: It's me, I intimidate women. That's what it is.

G: Can I say- breakfast with Jamie Foxx, talking about being whipped by his grandmother... I was whipped by my grandmother. I was whipped even more by my mother, and it didn't make *me* a good actor. [audience laughs] Not at all. I'm not very good.

Glenn: They were whipping you because they thought you were a bad actor? [audience laughs]

G: No, but Jamie Foxx- no, no, no, no. My gran was gone long before I was- [She was] whipping me for many other things. I guess I need more of it.

J: Now, you were just in Sydney, vacationing?

G: Yeah. I was down in Sydney, after "The Phantom." It was a heck of a long tour, so I ended up in Asia, went into Bali, then went to Sydney. In Sydney, I - Okay, this is a little weird. [audience laughs] But I saw someone being struck by lightning. I'm, I'm pretty much- I'm pretty sure, but- I was standing-

J: You mean you were *pretty* sure he was-

G: Okay, okay, let me explain. I was standing- This huge thunderstorm came in over Bondi Beach, and I was standing in this restaurant to the side. [I] went out to watch it, because literally the forked lightning was, was right in front of us. And there was a few people on the beach, and I was looking down going, "Why are they there?" And, literally, this- the biggest piece of forked lightning I have ever seen in my life strikes the beach, and I see somebody fall over. And two minutes- two minutes later, there's ten people there, then a vehicle comes out, then there's two ambulances, and then- and four police cars, and, and um- Yeah, and then the next day it was in the paper that somebody had been struck by lightning... But I think heís all right now.

J: Well, didn't I read you saved someone once?

G: [embarrassed] Yeah. Well, I-

J: What was that [about]?

G: Well, it was a far better job than I did in Sydney, I'll tell you! [audience laughs]

J: "Eh, it looks like a guy got hit by lightning. Oh well! Can I get a beer over here please?" [audience laughs]

G: Um, I was, I was in Scotland. It was about a year after filming "Mrs. Brown." I went for a trip with my mother - I always talk about my mum, don't I? But I went for a trip. We went to the hotel where I stayed at. And we- And the River Tay runs through, and I was lying on the banks, and I heard these kids screaming. And I turned around to this woman and said, "Are those kids in distress?" I donít know why I was so formal, but, um- Anyway, I walked over, and this kid came over screaming, "Save my friend! He's in the river!" And I looked in, and he'd gone under the water. He came back up, went under, and, and, so I dived out and possibly performed the *worst* exercise in lifesaving. [audience laughs] I mean, instead of being like that [imitates swimming on his side], I was totally vertical. And I just started to [imitates frantically swimming] touch the water. And then, and then I came out, and of course, *conveniently*, everybody had now noticed *after* the fact, so they were all crowded round. But I didnít know what to do, but a guy gave him the Heimlich Maneuver, and then, and then he was fine. And then- I got an award for that, actually.

J: It was like an opium den when I went in! [audience laughs] What happened?

G: Well, I had, I had asked my assistant in London to send me hypnotherapy tapes to Tokyo so I could take a holiday, and I was going to listen to them.

J: You were going to listen to the tapes-

G: I was going to listen to the tapes, that was going to be my answer. And, um, she- they didn't arrive in time. So halfway through Bali I said, "[angrily] It's *your* fault! I'm not quittin' smokin'!" [audience laughs] But I have to tell ya, I have tried- I've had my veins injected with sodium panthenol, I've had my ears electrolyzed, I've had-

J: Your ears electrolyzed?

G: Yeah, yeah.

J: Why don't you just try to quit smoking? [audience laughs] What am I missing here?

G: I just can't seem to- It's like, 34 times now, in the last two years-

J: *Really?!* Wow!

G: -to quit smoking. The last time I actually checked myself into a spa, trained for 11 days. And I then had to go off to do a photo shoot and that was it. But for 11 days I really thought-

Glenn: There's so many places here now that you can't smoke, and you must suffer!

G: That's right. I, I know, I suffer. [giggles] I suffer. When I stand out in the street- I swear, I spend more time in restaurants out on the street having a cigarette. [audience laughs]

J: Now, I heard when you came to the states you toured with a carnival.

G: Yeah. [giggles] As did you! [audience laughs]

J: I did too. You're better-looking than I am, why would you be in a carnival? You can see why *I* would be in a carnival! What were you doing-

G: I, I had taken the summer off from university and there was a whole bunch of students- A bunch of my friends were in the carnival. I had spent three weeks getting drunk in Venice Beach with three Irish guys that I met, and then when I turned up to do the job that I was supposed to do, the company closed down. So they said, they said, "We'll come and get you, come and join a traveling carnival!" So the next minute- like, within a day I'm in Sacramento, or Bakersfield, or one of them [audience laughs]. I went to both in the end, but- Working with this wacky wire- Has anybody ever heard of the wacky wire?

J: Wacky wire? What is that?

G: Wacky wire, you, you come down with this piece of metal that has a loop in the middle, and you, [demonstrates] you bring it down without touching the wire in the middle. I couldn't even do it for three days! Nobody wanted to play, cuz they were like, "Well, let's see you do it" and I'm like, "I can't!" [audience laughs] "Why, why would I do it if you can't?" And the first kid, [sadly] this little kid came up on his own, and he gave me two dollars and he didn't even get a centimeter, he- [imitates buzzing noise] And I was like, "Take it back, I can't do it." [audience applauds] Yeah, you may clap, but within a few days I was taking money from every kid in the carnival! [audience laughs] And I was like, "I'll tell you what, son, if you give me twenty bucks, I'll, I'll give you an extra couple of shots, and if you win, I'll give you your money back," and I'm taking money off of everybody, you know.

J: It doesn't take long.

G: It doesn't take long. And you, as well, but you did it, you know-

J: Yeah, I worked at a carnival too, but mine's- Yeah, you didn't want to go there. [audience laughs] But let me ask you, I want to ask you about being a student in Scotland. Did you ever study? It seemed like you always were sort of partying and drinking.

G: No, I studied. I mean, I was president of the Law Society.

J: [in an Irish accent] President of the Law Society, were ya now? [audience cheers]

G: Yeah, I certainly was. I fooled them as well.

J: Did you party a lot?

G: Yeah, I partied a lot, yeah. I had a lot of crazy times. In fact, while I was the president, we had a fancy-dress- a Halloween cheese-and-wine ceilidh, right?

J: A cheese-and-wine ceilidh?

G: A cheese-and-wine ceilidh, you know, itís a kind of traditional Scottish dance. But none of that went on, we just all got drunk. [audience laughs] And I dressed up as a Viking, and, and, I swear, a lot of my friends were insane. And the next minute I see six of them kicking the crap out of this guy on the floor, and the guy didnít belong- I had to drag him away. I take him outside and [giggles] and remember, I have horns on [audience laughs], and, you know, and hair, you know, like false hair, and a helmet, and funny boots. And, and I took him outside, and I'm holding him, saying, "You can't go come back in, mate!" And, and he grabs me by the throat, and he's like, "What'd you say?" And he pulled me right next to his face. So I gave him the best Glasgow Kiss, you know [demonstrates knocking his own head against the guyís head] [audience cheers] And he screamed at me, "I'm going to get you, I'm going to get you!" By this point I was really angry, and I'm like, "[growling] Well, remember the face, then!!" [audience laughs] And I had visions of him later on that night with all his friends in the car, and his friend going, "So what did he look like, this guy?" and he's like, "Well he had horns comin' out of his head..." [audience laughs] "And he had funny boots on..." [audience laughs and cheers]

J: And don't forget, that's- now that's the *president* of the Law Society. [audience laughs] So you would, of course, be held up to a higher standard. Now tell us about "Dear Frankie." I read wonderful things about this movie, it's a very nice movie.

G: I am *so proud* of this movie. It's been around for, for a while now, because they held it off until after "The Phantom." And I just hope that the buzz hasn't gone off it, because it's been around the festivals, and, and I've never had such great feedback in a movie. Especially because it was a small thing that myself and Emily Mortimer just loved; [loved] the story, loved the sentiment. And yet it's really refreshing and unusual and just beautiful.

J: What's the story, tell people the story.

G: Well, very quickly- it's this little boy who, you realize as the movie goes on- he's deaf, and he's mute, and he writes- He's moving around with his family, his mum and his grandmother, and he writes letters to his father, who is a sailor. But then you discover that he thinks he's doing it, [but] this is a fiction that's been created by his mum to protect the boy. And, actually, she collects the letters and then writes back. And she's become quite hooked in this herself, because she can find out what's going on in his head. And then it turns out the ship that he's supposed to be on is coming into town. The boy finds out, she's in trouble, and she has to find somebody to play the boy's dad for a day. And thatís where I come in. [audience cheers]

J: Let's see, we have a clip. [the clip is played] [audience cheers] "Dear Frankie" opens Friday. Gerard, always a pleasure. Come back and see us again.