OK, apparently, they actually limit the list to current players. Like Mike Green of the Washington Capitals and Mike Fisher of the Nashville Predators, who make the list again.

(When a player drops off the list, like Zach Parise and Kris Versteeg have, does that indicate a precipitous decline in hotness?)

There are some things the list captures well. Like, apparently, its praise for Marc Methot’s back end, based on this assessment from Psycho Lady Hockey. (“A certain Marc Methot has a butt that won’t quit! I had to restrain myself from pulling the old pass-n-squeeze as he lingered next to our table.”)

Ah, but there are some truly ridiculous selections and explanations as well. Here are five of them …

“This sexy center is an alternate captain for the New York Islanders. But with hotness like that, we think he should be captain.”

First off, this is a direct slap in the face of New York Islanders captain Mark Streit and his Andrew-Lincoln-by-way-of-Vince-Vaughn looks. Secondly, when did sexiness become a mandatory requirement for NHL captaincy? Do they realize Brind'Amour was a captain?

Lies About Phil Kessel

Look, beauty is in the eye of the yadda yadda, so far be it for us to say that Spencer Pratt isn’t a good-looking gent. But we simply won’t swallow your lies, Cosmo. “This sexy right wing helped Team USA win silver in 2010.” One goal in six games?!