“Trump Brand Body Parts is going to decimate our national debt and unleash the power of the American economy,” President Trump explained. “The trouble right now is that if you want to sell your kidney, the government gets in your way. We’re going to put an end to that.”

Mr. Trump went on to say that every kidney, lung, liver or relevant body tissue will have the Trump “T” branded on it. As if he was expecting a verbal assault from fiscal conservatives, the candidate assured that buyers and sellers would have an unregulated market to ensure maximum economic freedom. A small 2% federal tax will be placed on every transaction. While the number appears small, the projected size of the body tissue marketplace is so large that the proceeds will fully fund the Trump Wall, Trump Mandatory Breast Implants, and Trump Korean Wars I, II, and III.

Republicans are applauding the audacity of the Trump scheme. For years, the rich and powerful have been exploiting the poor in America. The current situation is so bad that the indigent are looking forward to losing a few pounds and finally earning some real money.

“Do I really need my face? Mother always said it wasn’t much to look at,” said a future face transplant entrepreneur.

Democratic Senator Bernie Sanders is a prominent voice in rallying resistance against Trumpcare. Senator Sanders displayed what has become classic Bernie facial expressions of disgust and disbelief while discussing what is wrong with selling human body parts — especially with no government oversight.

“Do I really need to say that this plan is coo-koo? Iraqis are selling body parts because Republicans invaded that country and now they want Americans to make ends meet by hawking their own bodies?” Senator Sanders spat out.