MARIO Balotelli, Manchester City’s entertaining striker, has been having sex with Jennifer Thompson, aka Juicy Jeni, the woman who allegedly had sex with Wayne Rooney, of Manchester United. The Sun says:

“Balotelli’s Nights With Rooney Hooker”

Poor Jennifer Thompson. She is, as ever, a makeweight in a story about her own body and what’s been inside it. Hooker and tart was how the tabloids described Thompson last time round, a woman reduced to her job – work that was said to earn her £1,200 a night. Why did he do it, eh? Why didn’t she get a proper job sat in an office at her work pod and get off with the head of accounts?

Thompson soon become a “dodgy woman“, a cautionary tale about “us” all when the Mail’s Bel Mooney asked: “What have we come to when middle-class girls like this see whoring as a career choice?” Sod it that Helen Wood, the other woman said to have shagged Rooney for cash was intelligent and made a case fo legalised prostitution. Instead we read of Thompson’s “suicide” hell and how the woman who had allegedly shagged 13 Premier League footballers was under attack:

Jenny reveals some of the most menacing abuse she’s suffered has come from another high-profile footballer – astonishingly from United’s rivals Man City. Whenever he sees me out in a club or a restaurant, he starts screaming ‘slag’ and ‘whore’ and then starts throwing ice cubes at me. He’s relentless,” says Jenny, fighting back tears.

She also told us:

“I haven’t worked as a high-class hooker for more than a year, but that doesn’t matter to them. If people can forget what Rooney’s done, why can’t they forget what I’ve done?”

Well, you could stop talking to the press, Jenny, and selling your story. Also, if prostitution operates on a class system, shag ‘n’ tell Jenny may never have been all that high class, more middle-class with delusions of grandeur.

And so to today’s news that Balotelli allegedly “bedded Jennifer, 24, even though he once taunted her over her 2010 romp with Man U’s Rooney”. The Sun says Balotelli hooked up with Thompson behind his the abck of his lover, Raffaella Fico.

Jennifer became notorious in 2010 when it was revealed Manchester United superstar Wayne Rooney paid her and hooker pal Helen Wood £1,200 for a seedy threesome in a hotel.

It was a five-star hotel, the Lowry. So. Not seedy. Jennifer was not notorious. Rooney was. She was dong her job. What is a woman described first and foremost as a “hooker” supposed to do? He was the happy family man (see Hello! photoshoots). She made no pretence.

A “pal” says:

“It wasn’t just a one-off. Jenny saw Mario five or so times and they had sex twice. The first time was after a night out in Manchester and he invited her back to a party at his mansion. A fair bit of champagne was flowing and things moved on from there. Jenny had no idea he had a girlfriend. He was acting like a single man. He knew she was the girl who had the threesome with Rooney. But that didn’t put him off at all. He asked her all about it.”

An it be that Man City star Balotelli was turned on by squiring a woman who was once with his Man United rival? The “pal” adds:

Jenny has been burned by her involvement with footballers before but she fell for it.

Burned? She sold her story. It was more of a tanning – in Ibiza, if memory serves, where she modelled her new bosoms – than a scalding. (Although she once was rescued from a house fire.) The “pal” adds:

“He was caring, loving, sensual and made her feel special. But she hasn’t seen him since her birthday last month. One night he told her about Raffaella and that was the end of it.”

Good old, noble Jeni. No sign that Mario Balotelli hired her for sex. This was an alleged fluid and free metting of unmarried genitals. But it’s not the end of it because Jennifer told a “pal” and the “pal” tolf the Sun…

Update: Balotelli’s agent Mino Raiola says in a statement:

“Mario is a young and impulsive football player and as such he is an easy target for tabloids looking for stories and people seeking to benefit from being associated with him…Lately I feel that the chase has become more purposeful and women, in particular, are targeting Mario looking to make money from him directly or by selling stories to newspapers. In this regard, we therefore wish to confirm that Mario has had a brief involvement with Miss Jennifer Thompson, a well-known figure amongst tabloid readers in England. Mario prefers to admit what has happened, has refused any means on offer to try to keep the matter silent and will deal with any consequences his actions bring in the way of public attention. However, he prefers to deal with his personal life in private and had told those close to him about this situation prior to any suggestion of this matter becoming public.”

Or as Juici Jen says:

“When we were in his house and Mario asked me if I wanted to go to the bedroom. He didn’t waste much time. Before I knew it we were in his bed and having sex.”

Like the requirement on meat products to contain a minimum amount of meat to be considered a meat dish.Newspapers should be required to have a minimum amount of actual news for them to be called NEWS-papers. The ones that dont qualify should carry a health warning:Not to be read by anyone who can count past 10, or risk of apoplexy and exasperation could cause head to explode.