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During my daily 40-minute commute to work, I have quite a bit of time in the car to think, pray, and even preach (to myself). The interstate I take branches into 5 different lanes and while I was driving along the other day, I had the most beautiful thought: all of these cars are traveling in the same direction and though we may be going to the same city, we all have different destinations within that city. There were cars all around me and regardless of speed we had one thing in common: we were all moving forward in the same direction. Our final destinations didn’t matter at that time because during that brief snapshot of our journeys we were all in the process of getting there.

Leave that Fruit on the Tree

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” 2 The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,3 but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’ 4 “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman.5 “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves. 8 Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden.9 But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” 10 He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” 11 And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” 12 The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.” 13 Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” — Genesis 3: 1-12, (NIV)

In Genesis 3, the serpent challenged Eve with a question that led her to doubt God and what He had commanded about not eating the fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. She knew that she was not supposed to eat from it but she started reasoning and justified her decision to violate God’s command. Her reasoning did not change the fact that eating the forbidden fruit was sin and introduced death into the world. Fact will always be fact despite human reasoning.

The Comparison Game

I’m a Christian and I often struggle with what I call the comparison game. Daily, I have to shut down lying thoughts that try to tell me stupid stuff like:‘you probably missed God because you are over 30 and single’

‘God is holding out on you; you’re missing something good’

‘you are wasting time waiting, you need to put yourself out there and make it happen on your own’

‘your friends are all married with children and you’re not; there’s something wrong with you’

‘did you really hear God, is He even with you?‘

The enemy is out to destroy my relationship with God, he wants me to doubt the Lord’s authority, love, and concern for me and every detail about my life. When things don’t arrive on my timetable, I can’t give into discouragement because what I thought was something good didn’t work out the way I had imagined or hoped. More often than not, whether it was a relationship, a job, or an opportunity that didn’t work out, I can trust and believe that it wasn’t God’s best for me. Rest assured, the Lord will always come through with the upgrade.

I’ve settled on this– if the Lord thought so much about me that He didn’t think twice about giving me Jesus- His one and only perfect Son to secure my eternal life, how much more willing is He to give me good things that would enrich my earthly life?

Unpack Your Bags Now Instead of Later

I realize that God has graced me in my single life to work out a lot of things before I get married. He’s disciplining me to be a godly wife not just in the spiritual things, but in the practical things because honestly, if I can’t manage my own laundry by keeping my hamper empty, why would He add my husband’s and children’s clothes to it?

Seriously, there are a lot of things that I want to overcome; whether it’s being too emotional at times, overly analytical, or healing from past hurtful events. These and other issues are areas the Lord is growing, pruning, and maturing me through because frankly, I don’t want to expose my husband or my children to a bunch of emotional baggage.

There’s so much more on the table than we realize. God loves us–there’s a purpose for every season and every challenge that you and I encounter. We can’t waste time looking at other people around us and measure our life by what they present on the surface. Don’t assume that everyone who is married has “arrived” and overcome everything that you are trying to master and overcome as a single person. Prayerfully, they are continuing to grow in their relationship with their spouse by the Lord’s leading. Let God measure your progress and set your standards. Stop trying to keep up with the Joneses.

Submit to The Lord

As a single woman with a desire to marry God’s best one day, the temptation to believe that I’m not where I need to be will always be there. Unless I deny these thoughts access into my mind, I will constantly second-guess and doubt God, His provision, and His plan for how He wants me to live the life He’s given me. That doubt will lead me away from His guidance and further into my own pursuit of what I think is right. That’s a dangerous place to be. I can’t lead or submit to myself but with the help of the Holy Spirit, I can submit to the Lord and He’ll lead me to where I need to be.

When you are waiting on and serving God, you don’t have to worry about time. Trust the Lord, He made eternity and is not limited by measurable time on a calendar. Don’t compare yourself to others around you, just keep moving forward to your final destination.

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Happy Thanksgiving, dear ones! Celebrate by living a grateful life, stop and take note of the changing season, and love on those around you. You never know who’s love tank is approaching “E”. Why don’t you get to them first before the warning light comes on ♥

Ten Things to Be Thankful For

10. Life and freedom. It’s a privilege, never take it for granted.

9. My car. Lord knows I loved my Sebring and all 160K of its miles, but when it’s time to change, it’s time to change.

8. Work experience. Okay, this is random, I didn’t understand the process at the time but those previous jobs (although challenging at times) were moving me right along to my true purpose. #Dietetics

7. Nutritious food to eat and a nice, warm, safe place to call home. This time of year when it’s cold and the weather is bad, my heart is on those who don’t have enough food or shelter.

6. Grace, favor, and mercy. It would have been a different story if these weren’t in my life.

5. Every gift that God has graced me with; even the small ones. My warm spirit and ability to make others smile and feel at ease; these gifts are straight from my Father. I just have the joy of walking in them.

4. My friends. You may be few and far between, but each of you has a special place in my life. You probably don’t know how often you cross my mind, but you need to know that I think of you often and smile.

3. My family. Whether we are blood-related or not, you have enriched and supplemented my life to make it great. Thanks for the love.

2. Social support. Big dreamers like me sometimes (more often than not) need a boost of confidence and reassurance that our ideas are not crazy. Thank you for understanding my vision.

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Good morning, lovelies! Below is a great blog written by Bernadette Love to encourage you to not compromise during your season of singleness. Remember, the Lord has your best interest at heart, He has not overlooked you. Stay the course and keep smiling; enjoy your season before the next one arrives. Much love and enjoy your day today.

Lamentations 3:25-26 (New International Version)

25 The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; 26 it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.

We all have an idea of that perfect relationship. We know what we desire in our hearts and pray daily that these desires will come true. The Word today is don’t compromise. Set your sights on what you want and believe God for. Too often loneliness and the fear of never being happily in love will cause us to lower our standards and settle for the first smiling face that comes along. Our guts tell us that there is something missing, something not quite right…but here comes that still small voice saying, “Go for it, you might not get this chance again”. When this happens, when that small voice tells you to throw caution to the wind and get it before it’s gone, tell it to hush.

Stick to your guns. If you desire to be with a person who loves the Lord like you do and then you meet someone who goes to church for Christmas and Easter, please don’t think that being with you is going to change that person. They may have other attributes that you can live with but eventually you will have a problem because you compromised. This is what the Bible means by being
unequally yoked with someone. There are so many differences that can break relationships. For instance – you believe in being healthy…they don’t; they are frugal…you like to shop; you love hanging out with family and friends…they can’t stand being around people; they have a servant spirit and like to help others…you, not so much. These differences may seem minor in light of the fact that this person looks like everything you want, but be careful.

Take some time and prayerfully make a list of the attributes that are important to you. Sure, everyone wants to wake up to Common or Halle, but let’s be real. At the end of the day looks aren’t that important. However, I honestly believe that when God sends that person that was designed just for you, you will be excited no matter what they look like. But back to the list…there are some qualities that you know are important to you, qualities that you desire for your mate to have. These qualities should not be ignored nor compromised…why? Because I don’t believe that God would have us settle just to say that we have someone. God is not the author of confusion and confusion is what you will have once you settle.

This single time in our lives is the perfect time to re-evaluate our values…where we are and where we want to go. We must love ourselves enough that we only want what God wants for us! Waiting for your best friend to find you is never easy. We are an instant society. We want what we want and we want it now! For this reason, we often jump into stuff that we later wish we hadn’t. It’s time to sit back and learn to love ourselves all over again. Get excited about who you are in Christ. Love up on yourself while you wait for your best friend. Pour yourself into others and this will take the edge off the loneliness. Don’t compromise your standards or your values. If you have to lower your standards to be with a person, trust me, they are not God sent!

The holidays are right around the corner. Don’t let the fear of spending another Christmas alone goad you into compromising your standards and values. Take the focus off your loneliness and your desire to be with someone and watch God move! He has your best friend waiting in the wings!