What would two dozen servers from across the country tell you if they could get away with it? Well, for starters, when to go out, what not to order, what really happens behind the kitchens swinging doors, and what they think of you and your tips. Here, from a group that clears a median $8.01 an hour in wages and tips, a few revelations that arent on any menu.

What you should know on Valentine's Day 1. Make reservations early. Restaurants usually don't have an abundance of tables for two. We need to time to plan where to put everyone. You'll get a better table and we'll be prepared.

2. Don't propose. It's so cliché. But if you do, warn us first. We'll put you in the corner. Nothing's worse than a crying woman in the center of the restaurant. Trust me.

3. Since Valentine's Day is on a Monday this year, go out on Friday or Saturday. Most restaurants will also serve their special Valentine's Day menu on those days. Or go out for brunch! Then you can sleep the rest of the day.

I’ve only done this once, but the service was so bad I actually left a one penny tip. I did it to drive home the point that I didn’t forget the tip, but the service sucked. Flame me if you will, but this guy was a REAL jerk and really didn’t even deserve the penny.

2
posted on 02/11/2011 7:26:46 AM PST
by econjack
(Some people are as dumb as soup.)

9. Oh, you needed more water so badly, you had to snap or tap or whistle? Ill be right back in ten minutes

Well, I don't whistle, and I don't snap my fingers. But I like spicy food, and I do tend to drink a lot of water. I say "thank you" every time the waiter fills my glass. And if my glass stands empty for a prolonged time, or if I have to politely ask for a refill, this will always be reflected in the tip.

3
posted on 02/11/2011 7:27:48 AM PST
by ClearCase_guy
(BO + MB = BOMB -- The One will make sure they get one.)

I have had friends look at me in shock when I have told them flat out that I will not have dinner with them again at any place I want to return to. Some people just do not know how to behave to wait staff.

We did this once as well. The waitress followed us out to the parking lot and told us that we forgot to leave her a tip. We responded back that we had not, that her tip was indicative of the level of service we received. She told us she was going to call the police on us. Bless her heart. I hope she found a different line of work otherwise, I fear we’re all paying her expenses each month. LOL

I recently had a waiter who operated on the theory that customers should come and go as quickly as possible.

As I was talking off my coat, he showed up and asked, "Have you decided on a drink yet?" He came to the table seven times before I received my food, just checking on me. Thanks for interrupting my conversation seven times! He asked me how the food was, before I had a chance to put a single bite in my mouth. I ordered a burger. It was large. I cut the burger in half. Before I even picked up the second half of the burger, he asked me if I wanted dessert.

I gave him 15% (I usually give 20%) just because I'm nice.

7
posted on 02/11/2011 7:32:56 AM PST
by ClearCase_guy
(BO + MB = BOMB -- The One will make sure they get one.)

A 28-year-old woman was shopping with her daughter in the cereal aisle at a grocery store when she was approached by a man who offered her a sample of yogurt. After accepting the mans yogurt sample, the woman immediately thought the sample tasted gross and disgusting and spit it out because she said it tasted like semen. (WOW!)

Read more below:

In a handwritten statement, the woman said, I spit it out on the floor many times cuz I was upset. The woman recalled that when she talked to manager Catherine Flores, she told me was a Greek yoghurt. People love it has lot of protein on it.

The woman paid for her groceries and returned home, where she told her boyfriend about the incident. She told of how Garcia had just come with one sample just for me, and that he was so pushy to tell me how taste it. The woman and her boyfriend eventually returned to the market, where they summoned police.

When questioned by cops, an extremely nervous Garcia denied putting bodily fluids in the yogurt container, which he admitted discarding in a trash compactor after the woman complained about the samples taste. An Albuquerque Police Department spokesperson said today that blood and DNA samples have been collected from the incarcerated Garcia, and that results from lab tests are expected later this week.

If youre having a disagreement over dinner and all of a sudden other servers come by to refill your water or clear your plates, or you notice a server slowly refilling the salt and pepper shakers at the table next to yours, assume that were listening.

LOL!

I was waiting for my boys to come out of the pool locker room the other day, and James showed up and said, "Pat won't come because he's listening to people's conversations!"

Worst tip I ever got was a religious tract that looked like a ten dollar bill & no actual tip to go along with it. I was already a Christian, but I can guarantee that method of witnessing will be turn people off to the gospel.

I’ve always found that a little respect and common courtesy goes a long, long way at the resturant. I usually get good service, because I respond warmly and personably to my waiter/waitress as a person.

A smile returned, costs nothing. A polite greeting, with their name included is free - and often appreciated.

I do tip, I’ve had jobs like that when I was younger. But the fact of the matter is that they remember the tip, they remember the table it came from - but they will seldom remember that it was you that gave it. They deal with hundreds of new people every day.

On the other hand, act aloof when they greet you; don’t be surprised if they remain aloof when they serve you.

One of my favorite books (Patric Rothfuss) wrote in “The Name of the Wind”:

A Tinker’s debt is always paid;
Once for any simple trade;
Twice for freely-given aide
Thrice for any insult made.

I went to a religious liberal arts College and all of my friends who waited as their College job (all of them good Christians) told me the worst shifts to have were Sundays and Wednesday nights because people who hit the restaurants after Church never tip or leave tracts as tips.

Yesterday I was having lunch and waitress brought wet plates for our bread. Then had to track her down twice to get refills on drinks. Never inquired if we needed anything. I usually tip meal70% but sadly she only got 2.96 on a 12 dollar meal.

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