Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Roll it up, take a hit

Friday:

I crashed the entire flight there. Dad’s driver picked me up from the airport and I crashed in the car again. Got back to the apartment, stunning view as always, then met up with gym rat bro GRB for dinner at the shopping mall below my apartment. Quick story about my dad’s apartment in HK:

I stayed there for the summer of last year when I did an i-banking internship there. The apartment’s in an extremely prime location, right beside the W Hotel, above a luxury shopping mall, and I remember when the A&F store first opened in HK, there were 100 A&F models parading around the mall every day for a full week. I was heavily heavily distracted by them everywhere I walked. Girls would go weak in the knees when they saw them, and I swear one of them in a makeup store squealed when one fittie waved at her. Looking back, if I was out as a gay man, I would have totally scoped out all the parties that they were attending and found a way to get into the invite lists. I’m not kidding: before I die, I want to meet a male model. Not necessarily A&F model, but a male model.

Now I know A&F has been receiving loads of flak recently for a really old interview that CEO Mark Jeffries (who totally fucked up with his botox and shit, dude looks shitass nasty yo) did for saying that A&F ain't for fatties and only for hotties (okay honestly though, I don't own anything by the brand because I think it's completely unfashionable and boring, also the cuts are obviously only for dudes with bulging muscles) but whatever, all these models are really stupid but really attractive and really incredibly in shape so I'll still watch this asinine lot:

Basically, abs abs abs abs abs.

Anyhoo, back to dinner with GRB. He came in a nice fitted gray suit with his chest bulging underneath a light pink shirt. The thing about Hong Kong is, everyone dresses so well, it makes me feel so at home haha. The people in my country however, are usually dressed horrendously for work. Not only do most guys not wear suits (because the weather is too hot? Dude, same weather in HK), the girls are the worst. I’ve seen chicks come in knee-high boots, Ugg ankle boots, crocs, frilly dresses that just barely cover their butts, and I look at all of them with disgust. Maybe it’s because I’m gay, but whatever, I hate it how people dress so badly.

We catch up over Japanese and soon both of us got a pretty good buzz from the sake. Dude’s a legal assistant about to take the New York bar. Both of us are now working for local firms that have a dearth of international folk, which we sorely miss. We lament over the fact that it’s pretty hard to connect with the locals, because let’s face it, international school students are hands-down the most fun. I realize that this is one social bubble that I still find very difficult to get out of: the international school bubble with its crowd of trust fund babies. Almost everyone dresses well, is uniquely wealthy, better-than-average looking, and speaks perfect English, while still passably being able to converse in their mother tongue. And every single one of them loves to drink and party. Totally my type of crowd. Of course, you have to sieve through the arrogant assholes that think they own every single shit in the atmosphere – I’m talking more about the more humble folk, nevertheless still with a slightly more generous wallet.

We then head over to some bar and he gets four Macallan on the rocks, and I get 3 GnT. After running out of topics to talk about, he asks me about the “girlfriend situation.” He told me he hasn’t really found anyone that he can connect with, plus he’s really busy and for now would prefer to focus on himself…and um his muscles (I added the last part, seriously, I couldn’t stop checking out his body back during our sauna days.) I decided there and then I was gonna come out to him. He asked me how are the women in my country, and I say they’re fine and everything but the reason why I haven’t found anyone is because I’m not attracted to girls. I give him a short summary of my coming out journey, and he handled it really well. Initially he was confused when I said that because he thought I meant I wanted to be a monk lolwtf um no, I’m way too horny to be a monk, of course I could be a Catholic priest though…I kid.

He told me I’m the first non-feminine gay guy he knows, and so he started pouring out all these questions that he has been wondering about to me. He said he never felt comfortable around the one gay friend that he has because the guy is practically a girl and always tried to be mildly flirty with him which made him uncomfortable, which made me uncomfortable since I totally molested him in the past but I guess I was “bro” enough for him not to care. Some of the questions were extremely odd. He asked me if I was disgusted by vag. He also asked me if I prefer trimmed or shaved pubes, what determines a pretty penis, whether I am turned on by going to a men’s locker room like a guy would if he went into a girl’s locker room. He even asked me to rate him, from a gay man’s perspective. This question was hilarious. I didn’t want to answer him directly because tbh, I think he’s cute and his body is to die for, so I told him that if he went to a gay bar, he would be molested quite a lot. He did a fist bump and was like, “hell yeah!” Hahahah, oh the simplicities of a straight man’s mind. After that, we made plans to have lunch on Sunday before I leave again (alas he couldn’t make it to gym with me on Saturday morning due to “parental problems,” I hope he wasn’t nervous about going to the gym and sauna with me lawl, but yes bummer I totally would have checked that boday out), and then I headed off to a gay bar by myself. I’ve covered that in my previous entry.

2 comments:

Good job coming out to your friend. He must feel comfortable around you to ask so many personal and probing questions. Like you said, he's a guy with a guy's mentality on sex, so if he isn't getting any, he wants to hear about how much you are getting. it's a weird competitive dynamic.

BTW, are you still doing your compulsory military service or are you done already? Must have been very distracting to be surrounded by some many guys in uniforms. :-)