The Improved Bullshit Detector Test

Elitist Bullshit

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. You've got yourself convinced that you're the earthly incarnation of all that is sophisticated, urbane and refined. Listen, twatbot. When you talk, I wonder if you draw a halo around your own head in Sharpie on the bathroom mirror. When you haughtily opine that this or that isn't worth your time, or that something your friends enjoy is middlebrow and coarse, you're not convincing anybody you're an intellectual or aesthetic cut above. Give your yammering mouth a rest and watch some television. Admit to yourself that there may be something that others people can teach you, something other people enjoy that you can share. Because until you do, you're gonna be a miserable prick. Happy trails!

All possible test results

Yours really is the worst kind of bullshit: the boring kind. You bullshitted this test. You skipped questions, you answered dishonestly; you play-acted through my hard work like it was some kind of ai... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. You've got yourself convinced that you're the earthly incarnation of all that is sophisticated, urbane and refined. Listen, twatbot. When you talk, I wonder if you... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. One of your favorite refrains is "I hate all this drama". And yet you're manufacturing it, you gibbering diva. You gossip like an elderly Basque matron. You nark l... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. Don't consider this a political barb; it's merely a personal attack. Everyone knows you're an ideologue, asshole. You have not been appointed personal spokesman fo... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. You've got your head so far up your ass, your alimentary canal is becoming a Klein bottle. You conveniently ignore vast swaths of reality in order to support your ... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. You'll happily point out all the ways the people around you are brainwashed, misled, confused, bandwagoning, deluded; evidently you are immune to all of this. My g... Read more

Yours is the worst kind of bullshit. Your forced and stilted absurdity is not quirky and charming, nor is it truly "random". In fact, you overuse the word "random". You're a pile of clichés, all fist... Read more