Query of Manijri M.Shevde

While surfing on internet, I came across your site and got your email id from there.

I am a resident of a Co-operative Housing Society residing in Dombivli, Mumbai – Maharashtra State. I stay with my father who is 73 years old and have undergone coronary bypass surgery an year ago. I myself am suffering from severe migraine.

We have been having problems dealing with an extremely noisy, insensitive and arrogant neighbour staying exactly above us. There are 6 members in this family – mother-in-law, 2 sons, 2 daughter-in-laws & a grandson of about 8-9 years old.

They slam the doors, drop heavy objects with loud thuds, drag furniture, and do all sorts of noisy nuisance at late night, say it starts around 10-11 at night and sometimes continues till 12-1 am. They all including the grandson just keep on screaming all the day. They don’t talk, instead they shout and disturb us.

I told this verbally to our secretary but he said they will not listen and we have to ignore.

Earlier they used to call many people at their home and party entire day till late night 3 a.m. 2 times I and 1 time my father had gone upstairs at about 1:30 a.m. and requested them to stop the noise, but it did not work.

Then I myself once went in the evening to them and explained them that as they keep on shouting we are not able to hear what we speak to each other in our home or even if we receive a phone call, but the mother-in-law argued that their voice is loud and that they talk in their homes and that they will continue doing that.

I explained to them that there is no personal issue with them. Only thing is that their voice and noise disturbs me and my father and that we cannot even talk in our own home and that they should not shout and talk to each other. But they told me to leave the house and shift somewhere else.

Once for continuous 3 days they had some called some people at their home and they made noise entire day – talking loudly, shouting crazily, laughing loudly, etc. and this continued till late night 3:00 a.m.

Then we requested our neighbour staying just besides them to talk to them. When he spoke to elder son he said they all have loud voices.

Still their noises continued. Finally I gave a written complaint to our chairman. Then chairman and secretary went to this family and told them that as they have got the complaint in writing from us, they had to tell them. But the family denied that they disturb anyone. Even this argument was heard in our flat.

Still the problem continues. That mother-in-law stands out of our flat and talks loudly to our neighbor on other side. When I requested her to go inside and talk or talk slowly as it disturbed us, she said, “u do anything. I will do noise purposefully.”

Even when it is decided that no one should wash their homes as it leaks and damages the entire society, these people keep on washing and say that it is their home and that they will wash it whenever they want and that they will make noised and talk loudly and do anything they wish in their home.

Pls tell me what we can do in this situation. My father and I, we both need peace and we just want that their noise should be stopped from coming to our homes and disturb us during any time of day and night.

I C Naik

It is a very tough and frustrating situation.

In Cooperative housing societies maintaining peace and an atmosphere conducive to good quality of life is every ones’ moral duty with monitoring responsibility resting in the Committee and especially the office bearers. There are many options including legal remedies to file a complaint to Police at the relevant time or to complaint to District Consumer Forum against the Society for its failure to deal with a situation like this arising out of deficiency in service.

One harmless and the least troublesome option befitting the goal of cooperatives is to seek the help of well meaning residents to win over the confidence of your Neighbors to discontinue such anti-social activities and show some empathy towards ailing Senior Citizen and a woman. I give below a draft of the Appeal to the residents and you may send a hard copy to each one of them or preferably by an e mail to them. This will help you form a group of like- minded positive thinkers in the Society.

From: Flat No

“Dear Members/Residents of …. Cooperative housing society Ltd.

As most of you might be aware, I stay with my father (aged 73) having had a coronary bypass surgery an year ago. I am myself suffering from a severe migraine having extremely low tolerance to noise. I wish to share the facts causing unbearable mental stress by an extremely noisy, insensitive and arrogant neighbour staying exactly above us. Sole intention of writing this letter is hopefully some members might be in a position to persuade this family members to mend their ways.

The Nuisance

1.There are 6 members in this family – mother-in-law, 2 sons, 2 daughter-in-laws & a grandson of about 8-9 years old.

2.They slam the doors, drop heavy objects with loud thuds, drag furniture, and do all sorts of noisy nuisance at late night, say it starts around 10-11 at night and sometimes continues till 12-1 am.

3.They all including the grandson just keep on screaming all the day. They don’t talk, instead they shout which disturb us.

4.They invite all many people at their home and party entire day till late night 3 a.m.

5.Once for continuous 3 days they had invited some people at home and they made noise the entire day – talking loudly, shouting crazily, laughing loudly, etc. and this continued till late night 3:00 a.m.

6.Their voice and noise disturbs me and my father and that we cannot even talk in our own home

7.That mother-in-law stands out in front of our flat and talks loudly to our neighbor on other side

8.Even when it is decided that no one should wash their homes as it leaks and damages the entire society, these people keep on washing and say that it is their home and that they will wash it whenever they want and that they will make noised and talk loudly and do anything they wish in their home.

Our futile persuasion

Twice I had and once my father had gone upstairs at about 1:30 a.m.and requested them to stop the noise, but it did not work.

I discussed this matter with our Hon. Secretary but he said they will not listen and we have to ignore.

Later I myself once went in the evening to them and explained them that as they keep on shouting we are not able to hear what we speak to each other in our home or even if we receive a phone call, but the mother-in-law argued that their voice is loud and that they talk in their home and that they will continue doing that. I explained to them that there is no personal issue with them. Only thing is that and that they should not shout and instead talk to each other. But they told me to leave the house and shift somewhere else.

Then we requested our neighbor staying just besides them to talk to them. When he spoke to the eldes son he said they all have loud voices.

Finally I gave a written complaint to our chairman. Then chairman and secretary went to this family and told them that as they have got the complaint in writing from us, they had to tell them. But the family denied that they disturb anyone. Even this argument was heard in our flat.

Once I requested the mother-in-law to go inside and talk or talk slowly as it disturbed us, she said, “u do anything. I will do noise purposefully.” Pls tell me what we can do in this situation. My father and I, we both need peace and we just want that their noise should be stopped from coming to our homes and disturb us during any time of day and night.

Appeal to members and Residents

We feel that we both deserve better treatment from the social view point since we are not blessed with the health which almost all of you by the grace of good have, it is my fervent plea to all of you nice people to please do us this favour. As we are craving for a peace in the Society we have not accepted advice from experts taking any legal steps to buy peace as that may spoil the atmosphere further.