SPORT FOR PLEASUREWhat women say

nd sweat just for the hell of it. I’m more into a couple of beers in the afternoon, a few more after dinner and then onto cans bought home from a Chinese man in the early hours.

But one day – sick of pulling in the nocturnal jungle alongside all the DJs, waiters, public relations people, managers, record label owners, music journalists and hangers-on – some friends suggested doing something different. It was a change of scenery, something daring and unheard of: join a gym. The idea of sweating uncontrollably in front of strangers in a closed and claustrophobic space didn’t really appeal to me, so I decided to start with running out in the open air. I’m not going to tell you about the effort – the breathlessness, the fiery red skin and all the suffering that a runner goes through when starting out – because that is pretty easy to imagine. I’m going to tell you about something else. I’m going to tell you that I went running early one morning and at that time of the day my friends, the streets are teeming with ‘fit’ sweating men, with muscles the size of my head, and it’s impossible not to get a cervical strain from turning your head when they go past. Sounds great but it’s also really frustrating as it is impossible to start up a conversation or for them to catch you eyeing them up when they are going by at 10kph. Still, I began to realise that another man was possible and that there are a lot of fit men in the world of sport and while I was having these ‘very deep’ revelations, I began to realise that my libido was on the rise. Day by day, the more sport I did, the hornier I felt. Some sportsmen and women more experienced than myself revealed that it was a secondary effect of this practice. And so I began to understand the footballers and the tennis players and all the stories that were always circulating around them; maybe they weren’t such scoundrels after all. I can’t help but remember the story that came to light after the Barcelona Olympics, where it was said that the Olympic Village was more like a club for swingers and that since then a good supply of contraceptives are always left in the rooms of these elite athletes during the competition. And so, from that moment on, I can confidently say that sport is life, sport is sex and sport is pleasure.