As a teenager, I saw that movie in its original theatrical run and sat through the closing credits in stunned silence, simultaneous feeling reassuringly understood and (therefore) eerily exposed and vulnerable.

21 Comments, 20 Threads

1.
Mel

Excellently done. And good luck to you.
My 89 year old father just spent 2 weeks with us–I know it won’t work out happily for us long term, on either side.
Conversely I just spoke with my 27 year old daughter-in-law on the telephone who presumed that I would take her to the airport, the little snip.
Ah well, an ice floe for me.

I remember watching “Looking for Mr.Goodbar” at the movies and then thinking about killing myself for months afterwords. What is the matter with people who would make that kind of movie or who would watch it on purpose?

If you want to watch black and white movies from the 1930s watch Jimmy Cagny gangster films, screwball comedies, King Kong, white piano movies or “Gabriel Over the White House”. Watching movies that make you feel wretched is sick and stupid.

Unless you are extremely lucky, your life will have plenty of genuine sadness. There is absolutely no reason to sign up for some artificial sadness too.

I watched the clip. If that was supposed to turn on the spigot, it just didn’t do the trick. I’d want to ditch the old bat too. Movies like that are transparent in their contrivance. As you said, she is annoying, and as someone who wants to at least try to make a connection/like a character, that was the equivalent of listening to fingernails being scraped across a chalkboard. Never heard of it, and now I know why.

I liked the scene above – because that’s the way it often is for the very elderly. I was fortunate, as a child, to have two elderly couples living nextdoor on either side of my house. They were like extra sets of grandparents as neither had had any children. They spoiled me but most of all – they taught me a real respect and love for those “age challenged” adults.

I never had to deal with infirm, elderly parents. My parents each died suddenly from one swift and massive heart attack. My mother had every Christmas present wrapped, labeled and waiting in her spare bedroom. Her Christmas Eve delicacies were waiting in the ‘frig – for my annual party. My dad was preparing to go deep sea fishing. Both – tho’ older – were vibrant to the end. I’d like to think had they needed a place to stay – my home would’ve been open. But, I’ll never have the chance to find out.

I love old films (I believe 1939 produced more great art than any year since the Renaissance), but will have to pass this one by. Too close to home. I cared for my infirm father for 13 years, and it took a toll on me that I don’t care to revisit. He tried not to be a burden and I tried not to let him know he was one, but we ended up resenting one another terribly.

No, this is one classic film which will have to remain an unknown quantity in my house.

CSLewis and a friend, during world war 1, to care for and support each others’ family, should harm come to either of them. His friend died. CSLewis took in the friend’s mother, and lived with her until her death. She was a markedly unpleasant woman, according to his acquaintances.

Screwtape Letters talks about a young man dealing with a pettish mother. You might like it. You will probably recognize certain scenes of frustration. Well, is a devil advising another devil on how to lead the young man astray. so there’s some breathing room and humor.

A biography or letters might give you, as well, sustenance for your soul.

First “The Strawberry Blonde” with James Cagney, Olivia Dehavland, and, Before Tim Curry there was the original likeable scoundrel, Jack Carson. A very light and enjoyable movie about Life, Love, Betrayal, and Corruption.

Then there is “The Man Who Never Was” featuring Clifton Webb (not being the Prig Mr. Belvedere) A somewhat heavier classic regarding Espionage and Loss of innocense.

I’ve loved old B&W movies since I was a little kid (when we only had 3 TV channels). I’d never seen or heard of Make Way for Tomorrow. But I lived it the last fifteen years. Only I found a nearby place (Good Samaritan Village has buildings all over the country, btw) where the staff were as loving and caring a person could hope for. (Hint: check out the kitchen and all the other “usual” things — but when you tour the place, look to see how the staff treat the residents. Do they make eye contact, or look over their heads? Do they interact, or treat them like pieces of furniture to be rearranged at set intervals?). When each of my parents was hospitalized, the staff members would, *on* *their* *days* *off* visit them in the hospital that was the opposite end of town from the Village. You honestly can’t pay enough for that kind of loving devotion.

My mother died the 3rd of July, 2003 (age 89). My father died last Christmas Eve (age 96, after just having played Santa Claus in a Village production). I’d give anything to sit and listen to them talk about whatever they wanted to.

My husband’s parents are in their mid-80′s, and just as robust and self-sufficient as my parents had been before my mother’s Parkinson’s took a turn for the worst. I can see a day coming when, they, too, will be more our responsibility than at present. I’ll roll with it as another stage in an ongoing relationship that I treasure.

I sound like Pollyanna, I know – but, everyday, find something to *enjoy* about them. My parents (my father, in particular) were like having access to my own, personal time machine. His reminiscences are deep background in almost every history mystery I will ever publish — and I am a better person, and a way better writer, because of them.

I never identified with movie/TV teenagers even when I was a teenager! I especially hated ‘The Breakfast Club’. I could not stomach those obnoxious brats when I was exactly that age. I can’t imagine what my reaction would be if I watched it again now, at age 43!

I love “Make Way for Tomorrow”. It broke my heart over and over, yet I rate it as one of my all time favorite movies. FYI, I’m a 57-year-old wife/mom very close to my parents. I saw this movie a few weeks before my 80-year-old father died.

Anyway, I’m another lover of old movies who hadn’t heard of “Make Way for Tomorrow.” I’d like to see the whole thing sometime.

One thing I like about many old movies is that they didn’t show “everything.” I might be the world’s last-living prude, but still I don’t believe that its necessary or edifying to be graphic with sex and violence. Many of the movie-makers of old knew that it was enough to suggest. Many great movies were made during the days of censorship. “Gone With the Wind” certainly gets its messages across effectively to adults without being graphic.

Proponents of recent-day Hollywood argue that movies are better now because they can show it all for the sake of realism, or whatever–no more silly priggish hang-ups as in the past. In response I used to think, well, then if they want to be so “realistic,” why don’t they show the actors performing certain excretory functions. Well, sure enough, in some British melodrama of a few years ago with Cate Blanchett and Judi Dench, Ms. Blanchett was actually shown pretty graphically using the bathroom. I don’t know if there were many earlier cases of such, um, scenery in movies, but whenever the first case was, it was not one of the Great Milestones of Film.

There is plenty of drek to wade through in black and white. Not as much I’ll give you that but enough to keep you busy. There is just more jestum now because there are more movies now. Hollywood has been churning out stale tapioca for decades.

There is nothing new really. Just retreads of old tired stories with new updated scenery. The violence is in color, more on the screen (I’ll grant you, it was just implied before), sex is portrayed instead of implied but for the most part the acting, writing and directing is just as bad as ever.

And you’re right I don’t like movies much. I especially don’t like “adult” movies much. Movies where everyone is miserable, depressed and immoral. Where they whine all movie about some consequence of some action they shouldn’t have taken and in the end they all die or someone dies or wishes they were dead (usually me).
If I wanted to see “real” life depicted on the screen, I’d volunteer for social services, go to the mall or volunteer at a mission. I go to the movies to be entertained and human misery, angst, depression and sexual shenanigans do not entertain me.

Loved this article Kathy! I am a real fan of black and white movies which my mother watched everyday before she passed and really enjoyed too. I think it reminded her of her time with Dad during that era! Unlike the movies the kids see today with bad actors who are acclaimed and stories with horrible morals, the black and white pictures are really exceptional with actors who knew how to act and a moral to the story!