The tales of a Ghanaian Swede in Accra.
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Thursday, 14 August 2014

Grief, worries and loss

After a fantastic summer, (at times, Gothenburg has been hotter than Accra), it seems the weather has turned to reflect the mood. As the rains pour down over Gothenburg, everywhere I turn, people are in mourning; over a dead celebrity, a friend gone too soon or the passing of a relative. I thought I'd find out what my friends were up to on Facebook this evening, only to realise a friend has just been diagnosed with cancer.

It makes my heart sink any time I hear of anyone being caught by this horrible disease. I truly hope she gets through it with good medical care and the support of her friends and family. After going through a very tough time last year, I realise how sad it is when in your sorrow, those you thought were your friends desert you. Thankfully, in my own situation, I had a great support team within my own family, otherwise I don't know how I would've made it. Still, it's been more than a year and I still mourn the friends I lost*, because when I needed them the most, they chose not to be there for me.

4 comments:

Maya Mame, as always, great to read from you! A very powerful post. I hear you on adversity showing you who your real friends are. Also hear you on cancer. Although its been a couple of months, I am still reeling from the fact that one of my friends lost his battle with cancer. He fought long and hard and bravely. Like is indeed too short.

I am so sad to hear about your friend, Abena. I hope you are/have been able to grieve him, as it seems in this fast-paced world we're expected to bounce back to happiness as if nothing happened. Life really is too short and it seems some don't get a fair opportunity to enjoy it.

As regards friends, I doubt I'll ever understand why anyone would choose to desert a friend in their most fragile time. Who knows, maybe one day, I'll confront one of my former friends, just out of curiosity...

Hi Maya maame,I just found your blog. Hope you have recovered the fully from the difficulties you had last year. With regards to friends it takes adversity to find out who are fair weather friends. Often when things are going well you find a lot of people drifting to you pretending to be friends so that they can enjoy what you have with you or benefit from the contacts you have. Once they think they can no longer get those things they desert you without even knowing. Take heart. Seth London

Thanks Maya Mame, I think me not being in Ghana makes the loss so surreal. I know it will probably hit me more when I am back in Ghana....eventually.You really have to confront one of these former friends. I find it so sad that they were not there when you needed them.