Sequential Septimus Samopfey

The man of sequence didn’t quite realize his influence.
He knew he had some sort of extraordinary power, but not that much.

He was born 2 years before his parents met, which meant he had to wait around for a while before he was given a name.
They called him Septimus Samopfey because he was the first of seven sons that they didn’t end up having.
And besides that, Septimus does not mean seven, it just sounds like it should.
Septimus became a mathematician because, like mainly most modern, meaningful, master mathematicians, he could speak mind-numbing numbers better than he could speak worldly-wise words.
Septimus loved to observe the rational behavior of actions.
He was obsessed with the consequences of A causing B which caused C&D which of course, divide to create EFG and possibly HJ&K.
He then published his findings in popular book form, with the catchy title of ‘The Formula for the Secret Sequential Situations Suffering Synonymously with Septimus Samopfey’s Systematic Study of Simple Systems’.
It became a top seller and friends of Septimus Samopfey used to fondly refer to it as the FSSSSSSSSSSS.
Apart from over 2480 earlier studies of the same subject, Septimus was the only popular one.
Overnight, mathematics became a social phenomenon.
On the internet, Mathbook became the social rage for cool teens, millions would upload their latest formula and eagerly correct each other’s theses.
Some would even get into fights over incorrect mathematical procedures.
It is rumored that one fellow gave up drugs completely and then died of a mathematical overdose, just weeks later.
Parents couldn’t get their beloved little ones off Mathbook, all they wanted to do was write formula, all day and all night.
It’s just not healthy.
Even graffiti changed its face and unused walls would overnight, become giant blackboards with wild formulae and outrageous hypotheses scrawled across the scratchy surfaces.
MathTube was overloaded, as millions of videos were uploaded each day demonstrating hitherto unknown mathematical structures.
Mathoogle became monstrous as the youth of the world revolted and searched out every single corner of every mathematician’s desk, looking for that one formula, that someone might have missed.
Mathematicians became heroes, demanding millions for their wild numerical concerts.
It is reported that there were some serious undertones of calculus popping up here and there, but the police have been alerted via Mathbook.
Thanks, Septimus Samopfey for slapping us in the face with this completely unnecessary social phenomenon.
The world has enough problems without Septimus Samopfey introducing dreaded mathematics into main stream popularity.
What’s the next big thing?
It’s like the search for hidden fountain of youth, you’ll die of old age before you find it.
The world is driven by economics and power games that only a few can afford.
As much as they try to control it, there is always the element of the unexpected and unpredictable, unwanted surprises at the end of the day.
Try as humanity may, life is not controllable.
Life has its own hidden path to some exotic future, way beyond the understanding of immature mankind.
Maybe tomorrow or the next day or next year they will see the light.
No one knows when or how, but it will happen sometime, perhaps in 1000 years from now everything will be hilarious and understood perfectly.
In the meanwhile, laugh more, be quiet more and listen to your heart more.
And get off Mathbook.