Cuz I loves me a glass of milk.

Written on Saturday, December 30, 2006 by Jessica

Written on Friday, December 29, 2006 by Jessica

"A terrible thought has moved into my mind....It's gonna take a hundred thoughts to make this one disappear." --Poe, "Terrible Thought"

I swore off the news a few weeks ago. A family took a wrong turn in a blizzard and got stranded in the Oregon wilderness. If you don't already know the details and would rather not hear them, I suggest you quit reading now. The family didn't have any supplies save a few jars of baby food. After they ran out of gas, they burned their tires for heat and to signal for help. The mother nursed her seven month old and four year old to feed them. After a week, the father went searching for help in his street clothes. I can't even imagine the despair of the situation. Knowing that no one is looking for you. Having two hungry children who don't understand why you can't feed them. Nursing the children while you can but knowing your milk will dry up due to stress and lack of nourishment. And to make matters worse, the mother and children were rescued, but the father died due to exposure to the elements. Imagine what it must be like to be his wife, knowing that if her husband had only stayed, he'd be alive, too. What kind of conversations did they have before he left? Did she beg him to stay? Or did she desperately scream on the inside for him to stay but put on a brave front and tell him to look for help, it was their only hope.

I tried not to think about it. I tried not to cry. But I kept imagining it over and over. It was all so horrific that I swore off the news. No more news for me.

Written on Friday, December 29, 2006 by Jessica

Written on Friday, December 29, 2006 by Jessica

I just realized that I made it six months breastfeeding.

I can still remember when I was pregnant, imagining how I was going to breastfeed for a year or more. No pacifiers, no bottles 'til I returned to work. Just me an' my baby. I'd heard that some people had difficulty nursing, but I figured I wouldn't be one of them. I might have problems in the beginning, but I'd get them ironed out and would be effortlessly nursing in no time.

Then the reality of a child latched to my nipples set in. At six weeks, I was in such despair. I didn't know how I was going to survive even three months, let alone an entire year. The pain was so much more than I imagined possible. I couldn't nurse long enough to increase my supply. He was getting one bottle of formula every one to two days. I felt like a miserable failure. (And I wasn't even dealing with anything serious like mastitis!)

But I kept at it, and slowly things began to improve. I worked tirelessly on the latch. We never got it exactly right b/c it always hurt, but it helped to have a decent latch. I took herbs to boost my supply (being fuller made nursing less painful). I alternated sides, nursing on only one side each session. By far, this helped the most. Once he started eating every three hours, it meant that each side would get a six hour break in between nursing sessions.

And now here I am at six months, toting my pump around work, making enough milk to be formula free (yay me!), and knowing I can nurse as long as I like.

Written on Monday, December 18, 2006 by Jessica

Seth is sitting up now. Plus, Santa gave him his wish early, and he got to try pureed bananas last week. He's also had pureed bananas with oat cereal, pureed bananas with rice cereal, and mashed potatoes. He didn't like the mashed potatoes at all, not even when I added a little gravy! It's the least sweet food he's ever had. Maybe if they'd been mashed using breastmilk instead of cow's milk... :)

Written on Thursday, December 07, 2006 by Jessica

I don't particularly like wintertime. The cold and endless snow and short days can be depressing. (Fortunately, Baby's Daddy does all the shoveling and plowing, so it could be worse.) Anyhow, I'm compiling a list of its good points to help me feel better about winter.

1. No bugs.2. You can buy perishable groceries during lunch and leave them in the car until you get home.3. It's a free-for-all in the parking lots because all the lines are covered by snow. You can park anywhere you want!4. Christmas.5. [Your list item here.]

Written on Sunday, December 03, 2006 by Jessica

It's days like today, or rather middle-of-the-nights like tonight, when I feel like chucking breastfeeding. Been treating thrush now for five weeks. Baby shows no sign of it, but I still have an uncontrolled yeast overgrowth on my nipples. I'm sick of boiling toys, bottle nipples, and pacifiers. I'm tired of the endless pain and itching. I also have a plugged milk duct. Boo hoo. Poor me.