Saturday, January 9, 2010

I Will Never Know

She called him Maxie.

The early love letters were written mostly in Yiddish, and she kept them carefully into her old age, tied up with an ivory ribbon and tucked into a corner of her sewing table where we discovered the packet after they had both gone on.

The letters went missing, for the first time in 70 years, when we packed up their house. I came to believe that they had not wanted us observing their secret moments and the letters were lost by design rather than accident...yet several years later, they turned up again, mysteriously. I looked at them this time, even removing the old papers from their envelopes, staring at the Yiddish written out in two very different hands, his bold, dark and straight, hers lighter and with a slant...yet, I put them back without translating.

Too be honest, I think your integrity has already told you what you should do. What better person to discover these letters, and to maximise their potential by filtering them through your good self first.

The greatest of stories can always be told without ever revealing the full contents of the script.

How could you not read them. I mean I understand not wanting to publish them but . . I have love letters from long ago tied with a red ribbon in the big red suitcase of my life. I wonder what my kids will think when they finally find them? Why else would I keep them?

Im a sucker for romance and our old folks did it best because they didnt have instant access to each other. They had to craft their letters carefully to avoid being crass or overblown because such damage could result in a suspension of the friendship and any query of terms used and subsequent apology could take months to achieve. They couldnt just text to rectify a misunderstanding.Id love to know what the letters said but it would feel like an intrusion. And yet, everyone loves a love story, especially in today's climate where romance seems to be dying a death in favour of kiss and tell for filthy lucre...

Brian: I've long wondered about the contents...I wonder whether I'd see my grandparents differently from a reading of their private letters...

Willow: it's a good thing that my Yiddish isn't strong, so I could glance at the letters without having their contents fully revealed! Like a secret code...as my grandparents intended...

nick: I've been debating back and forth about it. I even got Sarge into the conversation. But we still can't decide...

Alan: Sepia Saturday is so great! It's inspired me to begin a scanning project--my mom has dozens of photo albums, so it'll be a long haul--as for the Yiddish translation, I think that between me and my sister, we can do the translation ourselves. I read the Yiddish words fluently, but without their meaning--I would need a dictionary to understand a lot of the vocabulary. My sister knows Yiddish grammar and syntax much better than I do. Perhaps perhaps...

Jimmy: I think you are right. If they were to be told, it would be through my filter...but I'm even debating whether or not to read them myself. For some reason, it seems like a big deal. Like opening a Pharoah's tomb, maybe I'm not supposed to be in there...It's the fact that it's in another language that makes all the difference, and Yiddish was the language they used to keep secrets, even when I was a child.

Megan: I seem to have taken a stand along the way on this issue...but I'm definitely wavering...

otin: I think I feel very differently about the love letters between my parents. It's just too proximate for comfort. I have no desire to read those, but I do have a desire to read my grandparent's love letters.

savannah: I would hate like heck for Hedgie to read some of the letters between me and Sarge...but maybe I wouldn't mind my grandchildren reading them.

Merely Me: I agree that it would be incredibly illuminating as a piece of family history! A whole other side of those two, that we never knew.

Pat: Yes, definitely a difference between a granddaughter and strangers reading those...but as Jimmy said, it's all about the filter.

Betsy: that must have been an incredible revelation to read your parents' letters! I guess we're old enough now that we aren't devastated to learn certain things...we know they were all human...but still, it has potential for discomfort (to say the least, lol).

Baino: I don't think I would want to destroy any of my love letters, either from Sarge or from those who came before him. But when I go the extra step, and imagine them being read...

Kat: I'm leaning toward some compromise...I would love to post even just little bits, as they are very beautiful even as artifacts, even without knowing the meaning behind them.

Mme: I don't think I'd be disappointed, but I might well be mortified! Especially as I have a possibly misguided image of my grandma as a gentle, inoffensive sort of person...

mago: indeed. I wasn't planning to translate them, but after reading the comments here, I'm tempted all over again.

C.M.: I love Yiddish too. I hope I can get Hedgie to learn it, even just a little!

Princess: I really wonder whether those letters contain anything naughty! I would be absolutely staggered if they did...

Candie: I am thinking that I will read them myself, just a little bit...

lettuce: isn't that a good photo? They really look as they are in love. Which I think they were, even into old age, and even to death. It was a very passionate, sometimes stormy relationship.

Joanna: thanks for stopping by! I agree heartily with everything you say here. You are so right about hand-written letters, versus texting and emailing. That you couldn't take things back so easily, that you had to consider your words.

UB: I value your opinion highly. I am leaning in that direction.

Karen: I am extremely nosy too! Rest assured, if they were in English, they would have long since been devoured by me. The fact that they're in Yiddish just gave me some extra time to rein myself in...

Cinnamon: their smiles are so incredible. Just their expressions alone tell a love story...

Stephanie: like I said to Karen, I too am nosy! A buttinsky and a gossip! And anything else you can come up with, that's me. I'm frankly amazed I've resisted reading them for so long.

It does raise an interesting question.Who are letters for after they are read? Bloggers dont have the same problem = we alone "own" the delete button.An interesting possesion !They Look Beautiful Together.

I have a great, great Aunt that kept a diary about her world travels in the Victorian days. I transcribed it and shard copies with some relatives that I knew would appreciate it. I hope I did the right thing.

The deceased might feel flattered that there is interest in their lives so many years later!

I can understand your reluctance. I have a bundle of leeters my grandparents wrote while they were courting. I read a few of them and was shocked. They'd been old as long as I had ever known them. In their letters, they were young, lusty and full of life. It was unexpected. The letters are safely bundled up and waiting for a time when it just won't feel so weird to read them again.

Mark: so is that your first name? I've been thinking all along it was Emerson! I should have just asked you. And by the way, your new pic, the one on your profile, is seriously smokin' hot. Yes, I am undignified, but come on, it had to be said!!!!

Kat: that's a really cool idea! I've been toying ongoingly with the idea of a podcast. I feel so completely uninspired of late...

Skeeter: that is thrilling~it's always amazing to see another side of people you were sure you knew.

RC: that is a very interesting idea, actually. I will have to give it some thought...

JGH: a Victorian travel diary? that is remarkable. And in that case, absolutely had to be shared.

Keith: might just have to take your advice~

Tony: that's exactly what I can't decide--to whom do those letters really belong? Do they still belong, in some cosmic sense, to my grandparents although they're dead?...