Teen Ink Forums

Can boys and girls be friends?

Okay! So my best friend is a guy! I mean he is practically my brother. We can talk about anything and it doesnt get weird. He has a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend. Does that mean we shouldnt be friends? A lot of people say that we should NOT be friends! But that seems stupid to me, because everyone that tells me that is an adult! So can I get some opinons from people my own age?!

My best friend is a guy too. But people say that we shouldn't be friends for different reasons, like he's a bad influence or whatever. We were in the same situation as you, pretty much, because I had a boyfriend and he had a girlfriend. But he was friends with my boyfriend (kind of). I think that girls and guys can be just friends. It's stupid that adults would tell you otherwise. My mom has been best friends with guys her whole life. Right now her best friend is a guy who is married, but they have only been just friends the entire time they've known each other. People can be so ignorant sometimes, but it is perfectly okay to be friends with a guy and have no kind of romantic relationship with him. That's my opinion.

Yes, guys and girls can be friends. My best friend is a guy but their has been complications along the way. A few weeks back, we were both at my house, alone and we were watching Misfits. Nothing really happened, we were just lying on my lounge watching TV, except I was lying on the lounge in a way that I would lye with my boyfriend. We were cuddling kind of, it's hard to explain it exactly. But then my friend, Fishie (his nick name) started to say something but all he said was 'you'. And then he said 'I have never been attracted to anyone else, except for Em.' Em is his girlfriend and they had been dating for about six or seven months. And of course, he was right, their was an attraction between us, we both admitted this, but we both made a pact and we said that we would never act upon it because we were both in trusting relationships. A couple weeks after this, my boyfriend had another falling out with one of his friends who was my best friend and she knew what had happened that night with Fishie. She had told my boyfriend that I had cheated on him so I had no choice but to tell him what had really happened. Fishie told his girlfriend and their relationship almost fell apart. The worst part for Fishie was that his girlfriend was more upset about the fact that it was me, because we have a closer bond then they do.
Their is absolutly nothing wrong with having a guy as a best friend, I used to think it was less drama, but now... My point is that if people are telling you that it is wrong for you to have a guy that is a best friend, don't listen to them. Don't let anyone tell you who to be friends with.

Of corse it's okay for you to be best friends with a guy. I find that in any relasionship, it's nice to be able to see different points of veiw. If you're talking to a gender different from your own, they will almost certainly have a different veiw. Sorry, off topic, anyway it is fine. Society really twists us, why shouldn't you be friends with him?

I really hate when people are weird about girls and guys being friends. Especially my parents: I can't talk about having guy friends or they ask if he's my boyfriend and start teasing.
Like, yes, it is possible to just be friends with guys and it's perfectly fine. You should never let anyone tell you that you can't hang out with someone just because they are of the opposite gender.

Funny story: I made one of my guy friends a gift for his birthday, it's this little paper puzzle thing, and I was quite proud of it, so I showed it to my parents and when they found out I was giving it to my guy friend they got really weird. They asked all sorts of questions, including the ever-popular "is he your boyfriend", basically being way more inquisitive and prying much more than they would have if I was giving it to one of my girl friends, which really set me on edge.
Sorry for the long reply, I just get very passionate about this subject. Long story short; be friends with whoever you want and don't let anyone convince you that you can't do that.

of course boys and girls can be friends. its completley your choice. if you both are in relationships then its fine but being single an having a best friend of the opposite sex can complicate a relationship.

But of course! Honestly, parents and other adults can be SO DUMB sometimes and not understand. I have several female friends, and while I've made a few HUGE mistakes, we got over it and are communicating regularly and cordially (right word? I don't know). That is a sign of real friendship; when you can move past things like that. So yes, it can happen.

I grew up with guys and I just get along with them better, so I have the exact same problem. Most people think that most of my guy friends and I are more than jusst friends, but that isn't the case at all. I mean, if your boyfriend and his girlfriend understand that you guys are just friends, then I don't see the problem. I mean, i personally love my guy friends and some of them are just like brothers to me.

Of course it's all right, my closest friends are guys, I don't see why some people think it's weird or something. For some reason my mom used to think that I had some sort of crush on my guy friends, but it proved her wrong (I hope). For me guys are easier to hang around with than girls, and for guys it may be vice versa. :)

I'm a guy and talking to girls is not my forte. Doesn't matter if I find them attractive or not, I stutter and they are hard to approach for me. That beinf said 4/5 of my REAL friends are girls, but they approached me, not me approaching them. My best friend is a girl, I like her a little but we both have that special someone we have a huge crush on and we even talk about it with eachother. We did make it clear that we are good friends nothing more, nothing less. My parents are still skeptical as are many people that we are in a "secret" relationship or something. I told my parents who I like and yet, even after all the fear and upset stomach I faced to tell them who I like, they still don't 100% believe me. Sooo aggravating. I've never been in a relationship(I'm 17) so they think I'm hiding it for some reason. Ohhh well. To answer simply, YES guys and girls can just be friends:)

People often tend to romanticize the whole concept of being friends, because of the movies and books we read. That being said, it is very common to fall in love with a best friend, because the foundation is set up, of having things in common and having trust in each other, both of which are usually required to be in a relationship. Even though that is the case, it is completely normal to be friends with a boy if you're a girl and vice versa. Don't worry about what other people say as long as you both know that what you have is friendship then everything shoud work out fine :)

Read Teen Ink in Print!

Get a real, paper Teen Ink Magazine delivered to your door 10 times a year. Makes a great gift!

Chat with otherTeen Ink members

Teen Ink's chat is available to Teen Ink members only. If you're aged 13-19, please sign up or log in.