dreams, baby steps and fear

This one is for those of you who have a dream in your heart, a tentative fragile dream, but the fear is killing it. The fear is bigger and stronger than that dream right now and so your dream, that fragile little shoot is not getting the light it needs, or the food it needs to grow.

I believe so strongly in the power of words, so I say to you today. Name that dream, right now, out loud in your study or bedroom, wherever you are reading this.

Name it.

Say it aloud, three or four times.

Now take a big breath, because I know that’s scary. I know speaking out the secret desires of your heart can be one of the hardest things to do. I know in your head you will have a little voice saying “who am I to dream that?”, or “what happens if I try and fail?” or even “this dream is so big, how do I even try to realise it?”.

Do you know what you have done by naming that dream? You have bought it out into the light, you have fed it.

And the more you feed it, the stronger it gets.

So what next?

Gather around your tribe, your closest friends. This is not a large group of people, maybe 3-4 max. These are the people who love you no matter what, who will support you no matter what. They are your safe place.

Now, tell them your dream.

What? I hear you say “Are you crazy?!” … Yes, probably!

But by speaking this dream aloud to your tribe, you have just introduced accountability. These people are going to keep bugging you about your dream. You will be chatting about how their kids are, and they will casually say “so how is that dream of yours going?” They will ambush you with this question at the most inopportune moments. They are now partnered with you in keeping that dream alive. They are feeding it too.

And then it is baby steps, nothing big (although it all seems big), because the dream is big and the fear is huge.

But in reality it can be broken down into baby-steps. What is your first step? Is it buying that blog name, or purchasing your first textile book? Is it signing up for that class or entering a poem in a competition?

And each step you take, you will feel afraid, but at each step you are saying to fear “you have no power over me”. And each step takes you closer to your dream.

And the added bonus of the baby steps approach is that when your tribe ask about your dream, you have an answer; “well, I’m getting closer because I am taking a class in January”.

I am the kind of girl that needs accountability and maybe you are too. This community doesn’t need details about your dream, we all have our own fragile dreams, and we understand that you need to share those in safe places. But if you have spoken your dream aloud to yourself or your friends, feel free to write DONE in the comments.

Or maybe you are at stage of figuring out what your baby steps are. If it is helpful to you, write your next baby step in the comments.