USHER arrives… pockets of thoughts.

Sun In Bloom has undergone magical transformation. If you have not experienced Sun In Bloom since our renovations, I encourage you to stop by to experience the delicious inspiring and creative space we’ve unveiled. It’s everything I dreamed it would be. With patience and hours of hard work and determination, I now walk into Sun In Bloom feeling that I’ve arrived home. It is a reflection of me and everything I always wanted you to experience.

We are all very proud of our work at Sun In Bloom and the gifts in return have been so fun. Most recently, USHER walked into the restaurant to sit down for our weekend brunch. Yes! Usher. Humble and quiet at first, he soon felt at home, released his guard and expressed how much he was loving his experience. His favorite food was clearly the Strawberry fudge cake. Hands down my favorite dessert too!
And last weekend I attended the Vegetarian Food Festival at the Met Life Center to introduce Sun In Bloom to 3000 expected attendees over the course of two days. We prepped all week leading up to this event and arrived with 3000+ gluten-free vegan cookie samples. I had so much fun watching the delighted responses to our samples, especially children trying these delicious healthier cookie option and parents beside themselves with the bright-eyed happy responses they witnessed. It was simply an energizing weekend. We also raffled off a $50 gift certificate and after drawing a business card from over 200 that entered…the WINNER IS…..Jaclyn Barth.

We are so blessed to be here with this opportunity to be part of the change we hope to see in the world. And it is all because of your support. Always grateful. Always thankful to all of you!

And here’s my most recent personal journal entry…

Can you imagine what a daily log would look like if you recorded every thought that passed through your conscious, but you chose not to speak or share because of an insecurity or doubt?

10 years ago I was diagnosed with systemic candida. It explained my history of chronic fatigue, constant stomach aches, severe bloating, constipation, anxiety, depression, memory loss, and a serious sugar addiction. And even after being diagnosed with something so damaging to every system in my body, I continued to maintain all of my unhealthy habits that supported the growth of yeast. I just couldn’t find the strength to face everything this “dis-ease” was supporting me to hide from and somehow found comfort living in a heavy fog.

Eventually I did hit rock bottom. And it was this fall that pushed me forward in my journey.

Although my awareness for the importance of what foods I was choosing to nourish myself with became increasingly present in my thoughts, it was discovering Bikram yoga that nourished me with the strength I needed to begin deconstructing the walls I had surrounded myself with.

I sweated out years of abuse and faced my fears in the studio mirror every day. The transformation was significant. My light turned ON and it was so bright. Just like a baby bird chipping away at it’s egg shell, every day I was chipping away at mine until eventually I stepped out from the dark into the light. This moment I will never forget.

But as soon as I stepped out of my shell, my desire to shed layers I was clearly still withholding grew deeper. Also, Candida continued to show up present in my blood stream. This is when I turned to my choice to live a raw food lifestyle. As soon as made this commitment, I began to cleanse at an even deeper level – on both physical and spiritual planes. And the combination of practicing yoga daily and consuming beautiful organic live foods opened the curtain to a life of truly being ALIVE. Life became an exquisite show.

My experiences were extraordinary and I never imagined the possibility of falling down again. But the reality of my story is that I have… I’ve fallen hard again. And although my sabotaging habits are leaps and bounds “healthier” than those I was choosing 5-10 years ago, I’ve continued to live with a secret.

I am addicted to sugar.

Definition of addiction: Physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects.

Since opening Sun In Bloom (2+ years), I have become 100% physically and mentally dependent on sugar (agave, dates, fruit, grains, rice, cookies, cupcakes, muffins) to support me in powering through my days and the loneliness I experience in holding up all of the responsibility of owning a restaurant.

And although I drink green juice religiously and now very consistent with creating space for my yoga practice and gym routine, my secret is that I find every way to sneak sugar into my blood stream because my reality is that as soon as I inject, I can go another mile.

And in my quest for living the most full life possible being in alignment with my higher self, I am more aware than ever of the pocket of thoughts I hold onto. They are my secrets. Thoughts that enter into my consciousness and I hide them away because for whatever reason I do not have the courage to share them. I might feel self-conscious or that I need to protect someone from hurting their feelings. The reasons for justifying why not to share are endless, but all stem from fear and insecurity.

So, here I am… making a commitment to a sugar-free lifestyle for the next 90 days. No fruit or grains, dates or sweet treats of any kind and very low glycemic vegetables. Serendipitously I started started just 90 days before my next birthday. Living my life again fully is the perfect prize to keep me motivated on this journey. And if I can succeed, this will be the first time in 10 years since my diagnoses of candida that I’ll truly accomplish doing the anti-candida diet and on the path towards living an candida free lifestyle. I just know the light is going to be brighter than anything I’ve ever experienced!

8 responses to “USHER arrives… pockets of thoughts.”

Greetings,
I just wanted to comment on the candida issue, I was diagnosed with a genetic mutation in 2007 that actually turned into 2 forms of cancer. I like you love,love, need sugar. It is why I had my own bakery in Austin Tx where we used more complete sweeteners but still “sugar” non-the-less.
After having surgery for 1 cancer and going through 14 months of therapy for the 2nd(with no avail). I stumbled on a protocol where you ate mainly beans, tofu, tempeh, soy, vegetables and little to no carbs. I started feeling lethargic, and drained. Then I went back to my normal fare with not much change. I was meditating this morning and it came to me what the problem is. CANDIDA, it is so funny that I read your blog this morning which was addressing the very same issue. Thank you for sharing! I want to give the Body Ecology protocol a serious try( I have tried it but not 100%) and see how I feel with that. So good luck with your 90 days! I wish you health and wellness above all.
Peace, Love and Chocolate
Brian

Thank YOU for sharing your thoughts Brian. I feel that I’ve allowed Candida to control me for a decade now and just have to put discipline into action and move through my mental challenges. I read Body Ecology years ago… And everyone I know who has followed her protocol has had great success. I am removing all grains from my diet for 90 days, but following my cleanse I will open up to bringing small amounts back into my diet. I have to stay away from soy… just doesn’t agree with me. Integrating more living foods has supported me beautifully. All my best to you!

Hi,
I’ve tried the Body Ecology option many times, I have never had much success. Macrobiotic lifestyle has also worked the best, so I am transitioning back to my roots so to speak. I do think that the food combining might enhance macrobiotics.

Thank you for your honesty. I’m dealing with the exact same thing: candida, chronic fatigue, stomach issues, and yes, sugar addiction. It is strange how we eliminate these things that make us feel bad, and then when we start to feel better we start eating them again! I’m restricting MY diet right now and it’s really tough. My hope for the both of us is that even once we make it past 90 days of staying low-glycemic, we learn to keep all things sweet in low moderation.

hi aimee,
i finally got to your amazing restaurant for brunch yesterday and to say i loved it is an understatement. so inspiring! all of it… the space, the food, the drink… thank you! i came away feeling so nourished and moved to spread the love. i am considering both IIN and the natural gourmet institute chefs training program and i would really appreciate your opinions/advice if you have a moment.
THANK YOU again + again,
jenny

I am reading this blog following my first visit to Sun In Bloom a couple of days ago, while visiting Brooklyn from Nashville. First, I loved the restaurant (and I am not vegan so it was a very different experience for me), secondly, thank you for bravely sharing about your insecurities and self-doubt about exposing your very private thoughts and struggles. I needed to read that. Its time for me do something very similar in my business but I have been fighting it. You have just inspired me to pull the curtain back on a personal health issue that would help others if I make it known. Best of luck to you.