Wednesday, February 08, 2012

everything is going to be okay.

I woke up this morning for the first time feeling like everything is going to be okay.

It's been 2 months since my husband moved out. I've been waking up every morning with amnesia and have had to remind myself of my new life.

This morning I awoke in my room and saw this beautiful burst of sunlight and flower pins and hairclips that I had hanging and remembered what I loved. What inspires me. What makes me get up in the morning.

In writing my Painting book I realized that I was writing medicine to myself, my future self. As Helen Keller said:

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing".

Furthermore that the adventure and the daring part is just about aligning yourself to what makes you feel alive.

My husband and I had a beautiful and complex relationship where we loved each other and were artistic allies. There is so much mystery to people. There is so much that I won’t understand, but what I do know is that we must continue to “show the world our magic” and align ourselves to our own truth and aliveness.

Today I decided to paint my own magic for the first time in my studio in months and it felt AWESOME.

I realized while writing my book that what you put on your canvas is really a mirror for your life. By being daring on my canvas, my life broke open in a new way and is waiting for me to begin.

425 comments:

Dear Mati, I am sorry to hear this, but I am sure that everything will be allright! Your post ist wonderful and conforting. Thank you so much for sharing. Yesterday I painted the first time since a long time and it felt oh so good. Ok it´s not the best painting ever but I am so happy to finally have overcome the fear of the blank canvas.

Mati, I'm sorry about the news, but you are right, you will be okay. It's a new beginning and it will be good. You are such an amazing artist. Put your emotions on canvas and create more magic. Blessings to you!

Mati- I'm with everyone else here, celebrating your strength and beauty and vulnerability and wishing you well as this next part of your life begins unfolding. I hate loss but it's so much a part of life. What can we do? It was really upsetting to hear of this - I send my love to you.

Dear Mati, well written.. proud of you !!!! An elderly friend commented on the hardships of her life saying "you can either get bitter or better, with God's help the choice is yours." Blessings as you travel this new road... Love and prayers, Auntie Donna

Mati, that was a brave post to put up there today, and I am so so sorry ... but also glad to see that you were able to go back to painting today ... I hope you find a wonderful new chapter is just beginning for you. x

You've been in my thoughts a lot lately. I had no idea why but you just kept popping into my consciousness. I'm sorry to read that you've been through such a rough patch, but glad to see a peak of optimism in there amongst it. Yes, show the world your magic. It's such a gift. Cxxx

Hi Mati- Glad to see a sunlit post on your blog and hear about your inspiration through disappointment and sorrow. I think about you often. Take comfort knowing that a "village" is rooting for you. Love, Mary

Just now catching up on this blog post and my heart goes out to you, for your current sorrow as well as to celebrate the beautiful spirit you are Mati! Of my memories from my first Artful Journey retreat, YOU stick out most for your humor and genuine kindness and I know those qualities will continue to guide you through this new phase of your life =-)

Congratulations on the book! I've put it in my wish list so I can get a copy!

Dearest Mati, Thank you for this brave post. Yes, everything is going to be glorious...but it may take a while to feel it more than you don't feel it. Be good to yourself and lean on these kabillions of people who love you. xo

Sweet Mati, I'm so HAPPY to hear you are in this illuminating place -- it IS all going to be okay. It will be far more than okay. I love what you write about aligning with your truth and aliveness and painting your own magic! Your life will indeed break open to magnificent experiences -- your future self knows this. xoxo

Oh, Mati! I am so sorry to hear this news. I, myself, have been separated from my husband for over a year and it's been a journey to be sure. If it is any comfort - I will will say, it DOES get better. Sending you good thoughts.

So much love for you. You are standing on the precipice of change and magic and a new path and you are correct...all is right. It is as it should be my love. I separated 18 months ago and I'm telling you, even though you feel like you might burst into a million pieces and melt away into nothing, the sun still shines and the birds still chirp. Keep making happy elephants and smiling suns (like the ones I saw at Pier 1!). XOXOXO

Dear Mati, It is a beautiful post! You are so brave and inspiring to share. Everything is going well for you and your magic painting. Sending you good thoughts and ((hugs)). Enjoy the beginning of your journey! xo

Lovely expression of hope here. I would like to award you the Versatile Blogger award for inspiring me with your art. http://theteacupincident.typepad.com/the-teacup-incident/2012/03/the-versatile-blogger-award.html

sweet you. just making the blog rounds and came by here to see what you might be posting. and here you are letting your big beautiful light shine. a big beautiful life. yours. yes it is. love & light to you.

I'm looking at this old post, your most recent post, and hoping you are doing better. Keep painting and creating, and keep sharing. This is a great community of artists out here who love to hold one another up.

I just bought your book Mati and wanted to let you know it arrived today and I'm reading and loving it and can relate to it. So I thought I'd let you know this - I'm sorry to hear you're having to go through this awful time - I've been there unfortunately and know its not nice - suffice to say, one day you will come out the other end of the tunnel. And the journey will be over and you'll be at your destination.

I came here for the first time today from Martine's blog and I'm so sorry to hear about you and your husband. I am also very HAPPY that you're painting! I too have just started a new big canvas after a very long time of doing tiny tiny work. It's very liberating and so true what you say. Thankyou for sharing such inspiration! :)Jess x x

Remembering back when my life changed, I couldn't bare to listen to music, didn't want to see two people in love, thought all men were cheating, thought everyone knew he had left me... on an on.

I now know that I had to go through that to get where I am today. I needed to feel the pain and the shame to be able to be healed and to help heal. I blog about this and know that sharing is my medicine.

You will find your way, you already are. It's hard to understand what happens and why it happens, but moving forward (painting) is what will help you grow and improve.

Dear MatiJust got your book from the library (I had requested they order it and I LOVE IT!!!!) and am reading it today on a day when I decided that I must shift my perspective and look at the good in my life! And then I came here to find you online and then I see this empowering and inspiring post.THANK YOU for all of it!and for your courage in continuing to share your brave journey!

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wow, i haven't looked at any blogs for over a year now... looks like we both went through a divorce at the same time - i stopped posting on my blog too around that time. it's been a year and i have a brand new life. i hope that your heart is continuing to heal, it is a process that never ends... but there are bits of sunlight along the way. sending you love and hope to see your book or new paintings soon. peace,jennifer mazzuccojennifermazzucco.com

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Dear Mati...I have visited you and admired your talent, but didn't comment.I am so sad n' sorry-I fear this may happen to me. My spouse doesn't share or understand my need to create. I know you will find art to comfort you and support you at this difficult time. Go with whatever sparks your attention and tap those gorgeous shoes. You know Dorothy originally had Silver slippers, not Ruby ones.You are so talented and magic will come through you again and again!Sorry you are having a difficult time~ @>-------------

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