The 9 Most Asinine Statements by Vile Harpy Joy Behar

It came as quite a shock to the leader of one women’s organization when Joy Behar, ostensibly a comedian, called Sharron Angle a “bitch” on the “The View” last month. Sonja Eddings Brown, president of The Kitchen Cabinet, told The Daily Caller, “We thought Joy Behar was a classier act than this.”

To which we responded, “Ha ha ha ha ha!” followed by, “HA HA HA HA HA!” When our laughter-induced wheezing subsided — and we’re not gonna lie, there may have been some giggle-snorting — the idea for this post was born.

Before the obligatory lefty panty bunching begins in response to this post’s title, you should know that it’s not the first time we’ve been called mean girls and name-callers, and it won’t be the last. But we have refrained from calling Ms. Behar the b-word, and that gives us exclusive claim to the high road here.

Also, we’re bloggers, not holier-than-thou television “personalities” who get off on squawking about how we’re better than you because we vote Democrat. And we may have had a couple of beers while writing this post. Our readers are important to us and we’re willing to go the extra mile. For you.

So, with all of the fanfare a class act like Joy Behar deserves, we bring you her 9 most inane statements, the ones that should have even the Left shuddering in embarrassment. (Yeah, we’re not holding our breath either.)

9. Behar Says White Men Were “Traumatized” By Obama’s Election

According to Joy Behar, white men had a traumatic year due to President Obama‘s election. Perhaps Joy Behar was projecting once again. Because we are pretty sure that lots of men have been traumatized by her and the nails on the chalkboard sound that is emitted every time she flaps her pie hole.

On an episode of her show on HLN back in January, Joy Behar and her fellow harpy Whoopi Goldberg were discussing Chris Matthews‘ offensive, and moronic, remark that during President Obama’s first State of the Union address, he “forgot for an hour that he was black.” Behar and Goldberg made the following inane statements:

BEHAR: Maybe he needs a new TV. (Behar and Goldberg laugh) What do you think he was driving at there? Because he’s a lefty- you know, he’s liberal.

GOLDBERG: Yeah.

BEHAR: And he likes Obama.

GOLDBERG: Yeah.

BEHAR: And yet, he says something stupid like that- you know, I forgot he was black. He would never say I forgot he was white if he was looking at Bush.

GOLDBERG: No. Well, white people (laughs)- you know, this is- this has been quite a year for the white man. (off-camera laughs from unidentified person/people)

BEHAR: (laughs) Traumatic.

GOLDBERG: Traumatic in many ways because the things that people say now, you have to think before you speak. It sounded great in his head, I’m sure, because I know Chris and-

BEHAR: Yeah.

Of course, desperately trying to spin because Chrissy is a lefty, thus they totally heart him. And he likes Obama, so that makes him even more super awesome. It’s funny how the oh-so-enlightened lefties are the ones who only see color and race, always, isn’t it? And if you merely disagree with someone of a different race, you must be traumatized. Because they are so scary and stuff!

Well, Joy, we are not traumatized by having to think before we speak. See, we aren’t idiots, so we always try to think before we speak. We don’t allow others to think for us and then merely parrot their talking points, no matter how inane, like you do.

We also don’t focus on the density of a person’s melanin count. Therefore, we don’t couch our thoughts and opinions worrying about racial implications. We say what we believe, to whomever we believe deserves it, whenever it is deserved. It’s a thing called equality. We treat everyone the same way.

Post-racial; y’all should try it sometime. Perhaps that would be too “traumatic” for you, though.

8. “Isn’t it a little racist to call it Black Friday?”

After a long day of celebrating the racist discovery of America by genocidal maniacs — because nothing says slaughtering the natives like can-shaped cranberry sauce and football — Americans like to switch gears a bit and target another racial group. Enter that quaint tradition of racial hatred known as Black Friday.

GOLDBERG: Oh, hello and welcome to “The View.” Today is Black Friday, all day long, and I’m going to stay black all day because of it.

BEHAR: Isn’t it a little racist to call it Black Friday?

GOLDBERG: [laughing] Well, I would have called it African American Friday, but that’s taking something away from it.

BEHAR: [still serious] But there’s a negative connotation to it? Or does it mean something else?

GOLDBERG: [patiently] No, it’s like when you make all the money — you’re “in the black.”

BEHAR: So it’s positive?

GOLDBERG: Yeah. It’s in the black, so it’s a huge great thing.

BEHAR: A lot of times, like blackmail is negative, black sheep.

This from the woman who said of Sarah Palin’s supporters, “a lot of her base doesn’t even read.” But clearly she has a vastly superior intellect — how else could she offer such keen analysis of the racial animus embedded in the phrase “Black Friday”? And don’t forget, Joy identifies as a liberal, and we know where she gets her “liberal” streak:

It comes from umm, from being smart.

So smart that she thinks Black Friday, the biggest shopping day of the year, is a bad thing? We’d better not let this bobblehead know we’re dreaming of a white Christmas.

7. Behar, Obama and A Moronic Room With A View

In July, President Obama decided that appearing on “The View” was preferable to attending the 100th Anniversary of the Boy Scouts. Which makes sense, I suppose. I mean, the Boy Scouts are just a bunch of kids that other people were “punished by.” Plus, it’s all American like apple pie and stuff, which we know he thinks is super icky.

We thought that perhaps Joy Behar might revisit her scintillating and insightful commentary wherein she accused white men of being “traumatized” by a black president. But, alas, she didn’t. We, as gluttons for punishment apparently, watched “The View” episode. Eyes glazing over and minds wandering off, we heard only hard-hitting questions like this:

“Do you know CPR? Because, you take my breath away”

“Would you say that you are The MOST Awesome, or THE Most Awesome?”

“So, about your ‘laser like focus’ on jobs … your eyes are *gorgeous*, by the way”

“It’s so awful that the “f**king NASCAR retards” don’t get all the nuance-y nuane of your nuance-iness, isn’t it?”

Classy! Only, you know, with a “k.” And the Nazi reference with the Herr comment: so original, Joy! And by original, I mean totally tired and lame.

Another sign of the Apocalypse? That the president of the United States considers Joy Behar and her cohorts on “The View” to be an important source of information and news. Although, to be fair, they may be slightly more credible than most of the members of JournoList.

6. George W. Bush “has no business talking to Jewish people”

You know, the Left doesn’t really spend quite enough time connecting the Bush/Cheney cabal to Nazis. If only they’d thought of that a few years ago, maybe a George W. Bush impeachment would be reality instead of just the source of countless nocturnal emissions among Media Matters “fellows.”

You can always tell when Joy is throwing down the Hitler card because her standard “blah, blah, blah” morphs into “blah, blah, Nazi, blah.” Of course, that means someone has to actually listen to what this door-stopper has to say, and for that, we say, “Thank you, Newsbusters.” From the May 19, 2008 edition of “The View”:

It’s very interesting and ironic that George Bush Sr’s, George Bush, this one, his grandfather, this one, the late, I don’t like to speak ill of the dead, but in this case it’s fun. [laughter] He was a United States senator, Prescott Bush, okay, he was a director and shareholder of companies that profited from their involvement with the financial backers of Nazi Germany, okay? This is his grandfather. He has no business talking to Jewish people when he’s got this right in his back yard, this guy.

The president of the United States should refrain from addressing 1.7 percent of the United States population because of charges that his grandfather profited from dealings with Nazis? The way Joy goes on, you’d think W. and his dad sit around at family reunions oohing and ahing over candids of Grandpappy Prescott and Uncle Adolf. Not to mention the way they gush over scrapbooked records of the family’s Nazi money laundering business.

Is there anyone on daytime television who consistently produces sound bites that make the viewing public stupider? This sapheaded ninnyhammer gets paid to give her opinion. By two networks.

Joy Behar likely doesn’t know what epistemic closure means (you know, because she’s a dum-dum) but she sure does take part in it. In one of her standard fits of hysterical and inane shrieking, she broke out the Hitler card. While I usually can’t in good conscience force one to be subjected to her, this video clip pretty much sums up her up in all her delusional and bitter old harpy glory:

On her April 26 broadcast, HLN’s Joy Behar suggested the new Arizona immigration law that would allow local law enforcement to arrest immigrants unable to produce documents showing they are allowed to be in the U.S. is comparable to “World War II Germany.”

“Do you think it’s kind of — doesn’t it feel like sort of Nazism a little bit?” Behar asked. “I don’t want to overstate it, but ‘may I see your papers,’ you know?”

It’s not surprising that Behar is hyperbolic and clueless, as always. It is however, hilarious. Or it would be, if it wasn’t so vile. Why don’t you talk to people who somehow managed to survive Nazi Germany, Joy? See if they think having to enter the United States legally is the same as being rounded up, dragged out of your home, and thrown into concentration camps under constant threat of death. Of course, you can’t ask the 6,000,000 people who were killed during the Holocaust.

Silly us. Thinking of such things would require a brain, wouldn’t it? And a soul.

4. Having Multiple Children is Immoral and Irresponsible

As Justin McCarthy points out, when even Rosie O’Donnell mocks your eco-fanaticism, you’ve gone too far to the Left. On the March 24, 2008 edition of “The View,” Joy Behar, mother of one, criticized the morally unacceptable, socially irresponsible act of choosing to give birth to multiple children. We’d put the relevant parts in bold, but the whole thing is breathtakingly cretinous:

HASSELBECK: I love a lot of kids. I think it’s great.

JOY BEHAR: Don’t you think that, that’s a little bit- how shall I put this- inconsiderate of the fact that you’re using more energy, you’re using up more gasoline.

HASSELBECK: No, you use one pot for 17 kids as opposed to 17 pots of water —

BEHAR: Oh one pot— Joint you mean.

O’DONNELL: Joy was saying is it irresponsible socially or ecologically to have that many children?

BEHAR: I think it is. I think that you’re using more of the resources of the world. You can adopt 17, that would be morally acceptable, but to give birth to 17 children?

HASSELBECK: I think it’s fantastic.

ROSIE O’DONNELL: I do too. But this is Joy who was an only child and who has an only child. So this is her world view.

HASSELBECK: So, do you think Marie is socially irresponsible?

BEHAR: No because Marie adopted.

[…]

BEHAR: It is very hard and very expensive to raise children.

O’DONNELL: But if they can afford it why shouldn’t they?

BEHAR: Because, I told you why, they’re snorting up the oxygen.

O’DONNELL: All right. We’ll be right back after this break and Joy is moving to China where you’re only allowed to have one child.

Kids, you’re gonna have to do a better job of hiding your oxygen-sniffing habits, ’cause Joy Behar is so onto you. Do you even realize how much carbon dioxide you’re spewing into the air? Um, well, Joy isn’t exactly sure, but it’s obviously too much. Why do you hate Mother Earth?

According to misanthropic environmentalist Joy Behar, the world doesn’t have enough energy and oxygen to sustain large families, but hunting and drilling for oil ought to be off limits and that awful Sarah Palin is “very mean to animals.”

Hey, you know how we can save the polar bears and bolster Joy’s “pro-choice” street cred without taking a single extra gulp of sweet, sweet oxygen? Why not classify those filthy, oxygen snorting babies as pollutants?! Planned Parenthood clinics nationwide will throw a parade in her honor.

Joy’s thoughts on the human plague illustrate the Left‘s utter disregard for human life and demonstrate the bizarre suspension of disbelief required to swallow this anti-human flavor of environmentalism. Maybe instead of going after eco-criminals (aka, moms and dads), Joy Behar should aim for a little firsthand experience with the whole “oxygen snorting” thing.

3. To Joy Behar, Abortion is Hunky Dory. It’s Profits That Are Super Bad. Plus, The Baby Could End Up a Pedophile!

Last year, a Planned Parenthood director, Abby Johnson, resigned after seeing an abortion on ultrasound. “The View” included the story in one of their “Hot Topics” segments, inexplicably calling it a “controversial” story. Although, we suppose in their collective minds someone not toeing the Planned Parenthood line is controversial. Joy Behar jumped into the mix to preach to all about morality and immorality. We know, we couldn’t stop giggling at the thought either.

Behar quickly denounced Planned Parenthood for making money off abortions. She called it “gross” and “obnoxious” before she stated, “I don’t see abortions as a profit-making industry. I think that that is the real immorality of it.”

The real immorality of abortion is the fact that the clinics profit. In Behar’s sad excuse for a mind, profiting is way, way worse than the killing of an unborn child. Of course, this cognitive dissonance, especially regarding abortion, isn’t new for Behar. When Focus on the Family ran an ad during the Super Bowl, featuring Tim Tebow and his mother, Behar and her fellow travelers were all up in Stepford Feminist arms. You see, Tebow’s mom did not abort him, even though there was medical risk involved. The ads didn’t even mention that at all; the ads merely showed the great love between a mother and her son. But that, of course, still didn’t stop the idiotic screeching by the feminist Left.

The only argument against any of it is, that, you know, he could just as easily become some kind of a rapist pedophile. I mean, you don’t know what someone’s going to be

Wow. A beautiful ad about the pride a mother has for her son, and all it conjures up for Behar is “But… but…. he could have been a pedophile.” Well, Joy, it’s true that you don’t know what someone is going to be sometimes. In your case, however, we do know. You will always be an irrelevant, bitter bint.

What they haven’t discussed in any of these debates is how other countries have solved this. France has solved it, Denmark has solved it, England has solved it. Why can’t we solve it? [applause] It’s ridiculous.

Omigosh, why didn’t Joy run for president? Better yet, why didn’t she just draft Hollywood’s favorite multi-millionaire neo-communist documentarian to run for the highest office in the land? With all those public policy lessons learned while filming “Sicko,” Michael Moore could’ve overhauled the health care system and still had plenty of time left over to topple capitalism.

But gee, maybe Joy does have a point. They’re awful sophisticated across that there pond. (Cue the banjo music.) Take the French, for example. They have wine. And stinky cheese. And berets!

Oh, and don’t tell anyone, but they’re looking to the filthy American swine for ideas on health care reform. Last year the Wall Street Journal reported:

As Congress fights over whether America should be more like France, the French government is trying to borrow U.S. tactics.

In recent months, France imposed American-style “co-pays” on patients to try to throttle back prescription-drug costs and forced state hospitals to crack down on expenses.

That brilliant French model of universal health care has been operating in the red since 1989. Their solution was to kick the can as far down the road as possible. And now, their fragile health care system is buckling under the weight of unsustainable entitlement programs and social welfare benefits are being slashed. Hence, the enthusiastic protests (read: violent street riots) taking place across the country.

1. Joy Behar: For The Children ™ – Unless, Of Course, They Are Those “Demented” Homeschooled Kids

Joy Behar doesn’t just loathe people with minds of their own, she also hates their children. Excuse me, their “demented” children:

“A lot of them are demented when they’re homeschooled.”

Nice.

And wrong, as always. As Michelle Malkin notes, these “demented” kids have an excellent record of achievement. Of actual academic achievement and not made up stuff like “best recycler award” or, you know, community organizing. She goes onto say that homeschooled children are scared of other children. Nothing could be further from the truth. But, to be fair, Behar isn’t much familiar with truth.

I homeschool, Joy. My “demented” kid is two grades ahead. My “demented” kid is not afraid of other children; far from it. She plays with children of all ages, since she has not been indoctrinated to believe that she should only play with children her exact same age. Where, besides public schools, is anyone boxed into socializing with people of only their exact same age? That’s cuckoo pants. It would be similar to only working with, or caring about, people that share your lockstep mindset. Oh, wait.

Diversity of thought, freedom of individuality – those are concepts lost on Joy Behar. They are above her pay-grade, apparently.

If you want to see “demented,” Joy, take a look in a mirror. And stand back a bit, just in case it cracks. You’re welcome.

******************************

Joy Behar has said a lot of vomit-inducing things — Ralph Nader is “sexy” springs to mind — and spends plenty of time parroting the standard leftist talking points about everything from Christianity to the stolen election of 2000. But it’s her unrestrained asininity that makes us wonder why she’s on the air at all.

The answer, of course, can be summed up in two words: train wreck.

People tune in to Joy’s shows to see her make a fool of herself and to gawk at the drool and bile falling from the lips of this mouth-breathing numskull of a woman. And she rarely disappoints.