Like half of the US population, my friends and I went to see Batman its opening day. The theater was crammed with people, almost every seat filled, so I didn’t mind that much when someone I didn’t know sat down next to me.

When the movie was over and the credits started rolling I stood up, when I felt something brush against my ass. I shrugged it off as an accident, but then it happened again, but with some actual grabbing action. I spun around to look at the guy, but he had already begun to walk down the aisle. My guy friends (all six of them) didn’t notice.

After the movie, I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. It was the same guy I had suspected– and now know– touched my ass earlier. He was in his early thirties, bald, and very, very repulsive. Then he actually grabbed my hand, pushed something into it, winked, and ran off into the crowd. I was so shocked that this perv had the nerve to touch me, I froze. Scrawled on this piece of popcorn bag were the words, “You’ve got a tight ass. Let’s fuck.” Complete with phone number.

Did I mention I’m only 17 years old?

When I finally got a hold of myself, I told my friends, who promptly started looking for this asshole, but the security guard said it was probably a fake number. We dropped it after that, but I was so angry and violated I did something: I enrolled myself in self defense classes.

Next time an asshole decides to grab my ass, he’ll be dealing with a broken nose and burst ear drums.