There’s good news and bad news. Good news is that tomorrow marks the beginning of September and the new fall television season. Bad news is that it’s still August, which means that the biggest story today is the new “Dancing with the Stars” cast. I know, I don’t care, either. Just bear with me and read these quotes from head of casting Deana Katz:

“It’s like putting together the most bizarre and yet entertaining kind of dinner party,” Katz said of the casting process. “I make a jigsaw puzzle of including something for everybody. And what I think works best is, let’s say you watch because you love David Hasselhoff and you have no idea who Margaret Cho is — what I love is this idea that you go in watching The Hoff but you then fall in love with Margaret.”

Lady, stop right there. No one but NO ONE falls in love with Margaret Cho.

This cast, said Katz, is her “dream team.” Since the show launched in 2005, she said she’s been “stalking” Hasselhoff and Grey to be a part of it every season. But they both had prior commitments and reservations about joining.

And by “commitments and reservations” they mean “reservations.” The only things Hasselhoff has been committed to since 2005 are Night Train and the emergency room for alcohol poisoning.

Join The Discussion

They’d been trying to get Audrina for a couple years too, but she just figured out how to answer her cell phone this summer.

08.31.10 at 2:26 pm

Lenny

They had been trying to get Kyle Massey for awhile too, but even he didn’t know who the hell he was.

08.31.10 at 2:29 pm

No One Cares BUT

Greg Fitzsimmons does a Sirius show & podcast where he’s had Cho on as a guest a few times and she’s talked about sleeping around and going to orgies and stuff. Pretty sure they won’t be talking about that on ABC.

08.31.10 at 2:35 pm

Pulic Frenemy

I’m a big fan of Dog E. Fresh.

Dancing With the Stars? Eh, not so much.

08.31.10 at 2:38 pm

essequemodeia

Nobody puts Swayze in a coffin.

08.31.10 at 3:01 pm

spankyd

‘Lady, stop right there. No one but NO ONE falls in love with Margaret Cho.’

What about a chubby chaser with a thing for Asians? Nah.

08.31.10 at 3:09 pm

spankyd

Who’s greater?

Jennifer Grey

Erin Gray

Erin Moran

Captain Morgan

Graybeard the Pirate

08.31.10 at 3:31 pm

La Favre

That dog picture is very strong. Not as strong as Drunk Orson Wells dog, but marvelous all the same.

08.31.10 at 3:47 pm

Zack

Okay, the synergy of spankyd’s list (featuring the themes of “grey”, “liquor”, and “buggery”) and La Farvre’s avatar is the most wonderful thing I expect to see all day.