Have you ever noticed how love holds us all to ransom? We use it, abuse it, refuse it and confuse it. There are those we love because we ought to, those we love because we have to and those we love because we want to. Then there are those we love for no good reason at all.All these loves bring obligations with them.

If you love me you'll ............. (Fill in the blank)It may not get said -but the meaning is so often there.

Why do you let XXXXXXX say / do those things? Because I love him / her, of course.

We are conditioned to believe that showing love involves making sacrifices.Isn't it time we woke up and realised it doesn't have to?How does this sound, for a change?

"Because I love you, I am going to do the things that make ME happy. That means it'll be nicer for you to be around me.Because I love you, I'm not going to drag you off to shows you don't want to see, or parties you don't want to go to. But I'm going anyway.Because I love you, let's share the things we both enjoy together, but maintain the freedom to enjoy other things apart.

I'm going to do all of these things for you ,,, will you do the same for me?"It's OK to be selfish now and then.