Gush!Every Woman CanFemale Ejaculation & Relationships

In the final editing stages of the book! Here are the first two chapters... all you need to get started!

Pleasure takes mefarther and farther from the shorein a series of breakers, eachtowering higher before itcrashes and spills flat.

I am open then as a palm held out, open as a sunflower, withoutcrust, without shelter, withoutskin, hideless and unhidden.How can I let you rideso far into me and not fear?~Marge Piercy IntroductionDo you ever relax and blend?~Heidi Shaban Women love to ejaculate. Every woman can, and those who do, don't want to stop. It can be learned. You give birth during a great ejaculatory orgasm. It kills you and drives you crazy. You get sad, angry, needy, ecstatic. In the end, it relaxes the hell out of you, and we all have plenty of hell that we need relaxed out of us. This book has two audiences: 1. women interested in ejaculating, 2. lovers of women who want to help them ejaculate. All the words are for everyone, but, when I use blue italics I'm talking particularly to the women interested in ejaculating.You can gush. You can help!A man writing about female ejaculation bothers some women – it seems socreepy. Sorry. It bothers me that I have to write it. Gushing should already be known! It’s healthy and fun. I’ve been watching and waiting for the culture to evolve by itself. I’m done waiting.

Chapter 1 – My First Time Last night the moon came dropping its clothes in the street.I took it as a sign to start singing,Falling up into the bowl of sky.The bowl breaks.Everywhere is falling everywhere.~Rumi

I had no idea what was happening the first time a lover squirted, and neither did she. We had not explored below her belt before, and neither one of us had had many partners. We were on a carpet on her living room floor, soaking in the sun. Soon we would be soaking in something new. As I was going down on her I remember she tensed her hips, leg and stomach muscles a lot. After her first orgasm I slid up to her side and began kissing her while stimulating her yoni with my hand. Yoni is a Sanskrit word for vulva. Her next orgasm was a big one, and at the top of it she shot clear liquid from her yoni to her shins. The clear stream arched two feet up, sparkling in the sun. Her eyes jumped open and she blurted, Was that pee?!I don’t think so, I said, examining it. It’s clear, and smells fine.Is it normal? she said, breathless, and excited.I don’t know. It seems healthy. VERY healthy, I teased. Lost, I said, What should we do? Shyly she asked, Can we keep going? We kept going. I have tried to understand and teach gushing ever since.

Chapter 2 – Quick Start InstructionsA B C is easy, it’s like counting up to 3 singing simple melodies that’s how easy love can be 1 2 3, baby, you and me.~The Jackson FiveWarning: Ejaculating evokes strong emotions. A lover you trust – at least a little – makes it easier to learn. She has to relax to squirt. Women sense the intense emotions welling up and get tense. Many think the fluid trying to escape is urine and tighten, not wanting to pee on their lover or bed.It's not urine. Let her know that squirting is fine and delicious and safe. Spread out three or four layers of large thick towels on the bottom sheet. The towels may not be enough to reassure her, so be ready to move your lovemaking to a hardwood floor, the kitchen, the bathroom, a bathtub, or a houseboat. Once you realize that it's really not urine, you will resign yourself to soaking the mattress and drying it later. It will not smell bad or ruin anything, and, it's sexy.

Relax. Squirting brings up deep emotions, and that's awesome.

You can pee before you start. After you have played for a while, and you feel any urgency to pee again, go to the bathroom if it makes you feel more certain that you will not pee on your lover. No matter how much you urinate before sex, you can still gush, because it's really not urine. Believe me.

B. Orgasm Two With your lover on her back, start giving her a second orgasm. She may hesitate because it feels too intense, so back off some if she tells you to. Especially back off the clitoris, but reassure her: It will be okay.Let it happen.Relax.Go for it. Gently, encourage her to keep going.Let your lover keep going. Whatever resistance you feel, experience it fully and let it pass through you. Put the palm of one hand on your lover’s heart frequently, especially if it seems to excite and/or relax her. Breathe and listen with your heart for her emotions. Encourage her feelings to flow up and down her body, especially through the passage between her womb and her heart. Look deep into her eyes, undulate, lick, bite, massage, moan, spank, squeeze, caress – whatever it takes, whatever she wants.Breathe and listen with your heart for your emotions. Let them flow up and down your body. Let your emotions connect your womb and your heart. Don’t be afraid of something uncomfortable or very intense. Let it happen.

Assuming you feel and are safe and ready to go deep, it can help to hear any inner: “No, no, no!” and feel that intense resistance, then let your body relax anyway.

You may want to actually yell No, NO, NO! Your lover better stop! But explain that you want him/her to continue and that you'll use a safe word, like "RED", if you really want him/her to stop.

It is sometimes easier to let something happen physically when you have pushed against it emotionally. It gets your fear and your will out of your way. Insert at first your middle finger, then also your ring finger into her yoni. Your palms will be facing upward. Keep your fingernails trimmed very short so you do not hurt your lover. Straighten the inserted fingers with your bent wrist on the mattress and your fingers pushing pretty hard against her G-Spot. Your wrist is between her butt cheeks (see drawing). Let her pump on your hand at her own pace and with her own level of force while you continue to pay attention to her clitoris with your tongue. Add more pulling and thrusting against the G-Spot and increase the pressure. Take your time. Breathe fully, matching her breath from time to time. Keep your senses and your heart wide open. If and when she seems overwhelmed, remove your fingers and attend to her clitoris with your tongue and fingers. Pull the clitoral hood back with the first two fingers of both hands and give her a head-bobbing blowjob and a long tongue-lashing by suctioning the clit into your lips. But do not let her come again. If you sense that she is starting to orgasm, stop what you are doing and quickly skip to C!When your lover removes his fingers, try pushing your yoni inside out. You do this by pushing steadily as if you were pushing something out of your yoni. Hold the tension for as long as you can and then push again. This will show her/him the G-Spot. Ask her to push her vagina inside out and watch the beautiful G-Spot emerge, luscious and pink with little horizontal grooves.

C. Squirt Now, when the time is right, probably just as her second orgasm ends, curl your two middle finger tips against the G-Spot, on the vaginal ceiling, beneath the clitoris. Pull hard along the G-Spot with your two hooked fingers. Alternate between a finger curling come-hither motion and sometimes a rigid, hooked-yanking movement from the elbow and whole arm. Rotate in the first and middle finger and other hand so you don't tire and slow the pace. Listen for the deep sloshing sound. When you hear and/or feel the sloshing, and when her excitement level seems high, really pump her G-Spot with the two curled middle fingers of the same hand. Speed up and BE VERY, VERY FIRM, applying most of the force on the out stroke. The G-Spot is the female analog of the penis. Stroke it with a similar rhythm and maybe more force.Tell him that it is fine to pull hard, harder, even harder. Let him know that you will tell him if it is too hard. It probably won’t ever be. Try this first with your dominant hand, propping yourself on your other elbow, and place your hand under her upper back or shoulders. Keep your head near her head. Be loving, attentive and reassuring. The other – and sometimes better – position is to have your lover get on her knees and maybe hold your neck or shoulders. Sit on your heels to one side of her, so your body does not get in the way of your elbow. Your mouth can pleasure with one breast. Her legs must be fairly wide apart. A third good position is her on her side, the upper leg up towards her head, foot on your shoulder. Add force and speed sensitively but eagerly. Ejaculation requires much stronger and faster motion than stimulation of the clitoris or penis.Experiment with the tension in your body. SQUEEZE your lover’s fingers. Soften a layer of tension and holding in your belly. Let your legs be wide open, giving your lover total access.PUSH when you feel the urge to push, as if you were giving birth. Relax and push especially when you feel full and like peeing. TRY TO PEE WHEN YOU FEEL THE URGENCY. It's really not urine. PUSH and RELAX and SQUEEZE and LET IT ALL GO as you feel moved.

Remember, it helps to fight, fight, fight, then give up completely.Let go of any performance anxiety. You don't need to prove or do anything. This is just for fun and love. Take your time with it. Sometimes it feels better if you have been stimulated for a long time, sometimes you will want to gush without much foreplay. Squirting does not mean finishing. It is more like diving: you just keep going until you are exhausted, but the thrill of it might keep you diving again and again!

D. Play and Don't Stop The ejaculate is watery and will often wash away lubrication. After a gush you might therefore feel more friction, like the squeaky, grabbing friction of water on rubber. Be sure to slow down or stop pulling until the thicker lubrication returns. It only takes seconds. Saliva works well too. It is wise to splash and play in the ejaculate. Drink it! Rub it on your faces and bodies. You want your lover to get that it is not urine, not unpleasant, not something shameful or bizarre. During certain times of the month, for some women, the ejaculate can have a less pleasant taste and smell more like urine. Maybe splash and share a little bit less, but relax – you do not always smell like a bed of roses yourself! Once you get started, you will not need any more advice! Just repeat and repeat until your lover begs you to stop and, perhaps, come yourself. If you are a man or a single-orgasm woman, be sure not to come until you are absolutely sure that she is really done. For the day or the night. And “done” can take hours. You are going to need all the energy you can get. Warning: After squirting, she will often sob suddenly and without clear reason. Your job sometimes is to keep ejaculating her. Your job other times is to get your hands and mouth off her yoni and onto the comforting places. Hold her chest-to-chest, head to head, eye to eye. Put your hand on your lover’s heart and kiss her. Sometimes you will need to both comfort and keep on sexually stimulating her. Don’t be afraid to encourage her to go deeper, even if she seems upset. She is discharging old distress, and it needs to come out. What is coming up, is on its way out. Light stroking of the hair is very comforting. So is encouraging her gently to inhale and cry on the exhale. In crying, as in ejaculation or pooping, it is always best to GET IT ALL OUT. If your lover is a man he may not understand at first that you just need to cry, and that there is not usually much to say. He might ask annoying questions and be uncomfortable with your tears. Be patient with him. Tell him to help you keep crying. Let him know that you feel good crying, and that it is a way to release old tension. Tell him that you might want to talk AFTER all the tears are out, but not during. Sometimes the crying is not the end of the session, just a clearing of the tubes in preparation for the next round. Be sure to try to keep giving her orgasms and gushings until your she is truly done. She may protest that she is done when she really could, and probably should, keep going. Definitely keep offering and be generous and insistent within reason. Your lover may resist out of politeness because she thinks that she has taken up too much of your time and energy. Let her know you love giving to her, that her pleasure turns you on too. Don’t be concerned about your own orgasm, or fairness or equal time. The better she feels, the more she discharges, the better you will feel and more you will discharge. It's like magic. Feel her ecstasy with her. Let her pleasure be yours in every part of your body, especially your heart and breath. When she has been loved fully and deeply and completely, your time will come, and it will be fuller and deeper and more complete than ever.Let your lover keep on loving you until you are absolutely sure you are finished. Let yourself try again, even when you think you are probably done. Allow yourself to be fully pleasured and emptied. There is more where that came from!