You can’t handle the truth!
Simply put, I hate when people ask me personal stuff. Deep down, I love when someone shows interest, but I have a huge problem: I always have the urge to completely open my heart when people make me questions!

That’s probably the worse thing you can do for yourself, to open up. Now don’t take me wrong, I don’t think evryone should just shut themselves and never share their feelings. Quite the opposite, frankly – people who never share and the worse to live with, in my opinion.

But we should, at some point in our lives, to learn whom to share feelings and opinions with. For some reason, I learned to trust everyone. There’s nothing more dangerous than trusting everyone!

Not everyone is making you questions because they homestly care. Some will use the information you shared with them to harm you or someone else.

So don’t ask me anything personal. I’ll struggle inside to quickly decide if you deserve my trust or not, and then will most likely regret telling you something. And you also take the risk of hearing something YOU won’t like – because speaking my head out also means I’ll tell you what I really think about things. And you might not like it after all.

I admire many people. My mom is a great example, my husband has attitudes I really wish I could learn (especially at work), and many famous leaders, of course.
What makes me admire someone?
I guess anyone who has a high spirit, classic values like character strength, honor, respect for others. But also people with a vast knowledge, culture, appreciation for education, arts, philosophy.
In the end, whom I admire is not as important as how much I am closer to this ideal myself.
Being someone I myself can admire is what really matters.

If we are talking about last night's, I have to say that behind the door I find a bad dream based on A Clockwork Orange – I can clearly remember those eyes and evil atmosphere when the thing looked at me.

The most interesting is that I have NEVER watched that movie. Or read the book. And don't intend to.

My earliest memory – I think – is of my mom reading me a book before I slept. It seems to me that’s the earliest I have. My sister wasn’t born yet, so that’s before I was 5. I remember being in bed and SO happy she agreed to read me a story! She was sitting at a stool from the kitchen (look how much work I gave her, to bring that from the other side of the apartment!) and not very pleased to be reading to me. It didn’t matter, though. I was freaking happy. And, of course, it probably just took her a minute before I fell asleep. So people – when your kid asks you to read something for him or her, just do it. That’s a lovely memory. 🙂

The bookstore was swamped. It was a big place, but something brought people to it that night. ‘could it be that Bill’s sister is that famous and I never heard of her?’ Jane started to worry about making a fool of herself.
It was of Jane’s favorite bookstores, because of all the great books she could browse and not being bothered while doing it. Not to mention the couches, that were so comfortable that the place that created them for the store decided to put its name on the model – and it sold like no other couch they’ve ever designed. Even Jane had one at home.

The bookstore was swamped. It was a big place, but something brought people to it that night. ‘could it be that Bill’s sister is that famous and I never heard of her?’ Jane started to worry about making a fool of herself.
It was of Jane’s favorite bookstores, because of all the great books she could browse and not being bothered while doing it. Not to mention the couches, that were so comfortable that the place that created them for the store decided to put its name on the model – and it sold like no other couch they’ve ever designed. Even Jane had one at home.

Bill parked the car about two blocks away from the bookstore. He asked Jane about it first, to make sure she wouldn’t mind walking a little. She wouldn’t mind, of course!
The street where the bookstore was used to be quite busy at night, because of the bars and restaurants in the neighborhood. There were lots of people around, and the air was filled with the sound of friends talking and laughing.
Bill was walking beside Jane, and for a moment she thought he tried to hold her hand – which he probably thought it was too soon to do, since he apparently gave it up.
They walked slowly. There was no rush to get to the book signing, and they had all night.
“It feels great not having to worry about time,” she said.
“Are you always worried about time?”
“Feels like it, yes… I probably just need a little vacation.” Jane smiled when she thought of traveling a bit.
“Where would you go to?”, Bill asked.
“Oooh, that’s the hardest part for me. I always want to places, so picking just one or two is very hard!”
“I didn’t know you liked travelling, Jane! Have you visited many places yet?”
“Well… Not really.”
“Wow,” he said, laughing. “You sounded very disapppointed!”
“Well, I am!”, she said laughing, too. “Life is too short, and I can never be sure I’ll have time to see everything I want.”
“Maybe you’re just waiting for the right company to see the world with you.”
Jane looked deepply into his eyes and said “Yes… That could be it.”
And they entered the bookstore.

Jane walked outside her building, looking for Bill. He had parked his car across the street, and was waiting for her standing on the sidewalk. He was handsome, indeed.
“wow, do I really deserve that, Jane? You look stunning tonight!”, he said in a very low voice, looking her as she approached the car.
She couldn’t help smiling.
“Thanks, Bill. You look very nice, too.” jane had already forgotten how she played that game well. The smiling, the walking, the moving of her hands – all very charming, she knew that. Men had already told her before, after being caught in her ways. She loved the feeling while doing it, and she loved the fact she didn’t lose it.
Bill opened the passanger’s door and Jane went in.
After a few seconds, he took the driver’s seat, fastened his seat belt and turned the sound on.
“Maggie said you’d like these songs.”, he said, smiling.
‘He is really putting an effort in pleasing me! I’m so happy!’ she thought. Then the music filled the car, and it was a live album by Pearl Jam – one of her favorites!
“Maggie was right! I love this album.”
“I never get tired of this one, either.”, was his answer.
By this time, Jane was making an effort not to completely fall for that guy. She knew better than that, but the music was a big deal for some reason, so she tried to focus on the present, and stop imagining their future together.
‘It might not happen, so enjoy the evening before marrying him in your head, you crazy woman!’, she firmly said to herself.
Then she looked at him, sitting by her side, so good looking, smelling perfectly, with great music in the background and willing to make her happy for that night…
‘ah, it’s not going to be easy, though…”, was the conclusion.