If it were the 1700s, or even 1950, all we would have would be newspaper clippings about this absurd man who as mayor of a prominent North American town possibly did drugs. It would do the insane gentleman running the city of Toronto today no justice. None whatsoever. Thankfully, we live in the internet-era, where this entire saga is playing out in real-time, a time where moments after Rob Ford says he has plenty of pussy to eat at home, we get to see it immediately. Like we were there.

To add to this man's internet opus, we give you this GIF of Ford making fun of a Toronto councilman who also supposedly drank and drive.

We owe Rob Ford an apology. He has been providing internet gold FOR FREE for months now. Let the man do as he pleases.