There's something
to be said about birthdays, and how their significance changes as you
grow older. I remember eagerly waiting for the chocolate cakes, balloons
and games of the birthdays of my babyhood. Now it usually means another
step closer to gray hairs and wrinkles.

Anyway. I'm pleased
with the response we've had to the 500 Feat contest. Kudos to all those
who participated…you're all winners, regardless of whether your entries
get picked or not. 500 words is, as our Zulquar puts it, one b****ing
limit!

Zulquar's on cover
this week, along with Sabrina, and the two explore a common phenomenon
that's got most of us hooked: IM addiction.

Two of our MIA columnists
also make a comeback on centre this week…Gokhra and Lancer. Once again
we've shifted Tawsif to backpack. I'll have to ask our readers to bear
with us until we find a fitting slot for him.

Well, I believe
that the GCE exams are due once more, so I'll keep this short, and end
today's tete-a-tete with a good luck wish for all the candidates. Go
kick some exam donkey!

The Other
Side
Once upon a time, there was a river. The Nile River, to be exact. On
one side of the river lived the rabbit, and on the other side lived
the bear. One fine day, the bear was sitting on a stump, enjoying his
breakfast of berries. Then he heard someone yelling at him. It was the
rabbit.
''Hey! Hey, Teddy, get your butt over here. I've got something to show
you!''
''Not now! I'm eating.''
''Oh come on!'' said the rabbit. ''It's really important.''
''No way.''
''Please. It's urgent.''
So the bear decided to go all the way over the wide river. It took him
all day and all night to get over to the other side. He nearly drowned.
And when he finally got there he was groaning and panting, and wheezing
for air.
''Well, rabbit,'' he panted. ''What did you want to tell me?''
''Hey, Teddy,'' the rabbit began, ''look how many berries are on the
other side of the river.''
And that's why bears like to eat rabbits.

Slow
Driver
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers,
a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks
to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"
So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.
Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies -- two
in the front seat and three in the back - eyes wide and white as ghosts.
The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't
understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the
problem?"
"Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding,
but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also
be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit?" she asked. No sir, I was doing
the speed limit exactly... Twenty-Two miles an hour!" the old woman
says a bit proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle
explains to her that "22" was the route number, not the speed
limit. A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer
for pointing out
her error.
"But before I let you go, Ma'am, I have to ask... Is everyone in
this car ok? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered
a single peep this whole time." the officer asks.
"Oh, they'll be alright in a minute officer. We just got off Route
119

Corn
Flakes
Two brothers are getting ready for school. One boy is sitting down,
having a bowl of Corn Flakes, the other is frantically looking for an
item for show-and-tell.
''I know I put it here somewhere'' he says. He then remembers that he
put it in the kitchen for safe keeping the night before. He dashes for
the kitchen and stops at his brother, still eating his cereal.
''Hey, you found my scab collection.''

Animal
Super Bowl
During the Super Bowl, there was another football game of note between
the big animals and the little animals. The big animals were crushing
little animals and at half-time, the coach made a passionate speech
to rally the little animals.
At the start of the second half the big animals had the ball.
The first play, the elephant got stopped for no gain. The second play,
the rhino was stopped for no gain.
On third down, the hippo was thrown for a 5 yard loss.
The defense huddled around the coach and he asked excitedly, "Who
stopped the elephant?"
"I did," said the centipede.
"Who stopped the rhino?"
"Uh, that was me too," said the centipede.
"And how about the hippo? Who hit him for a 5 yard loss?"
"Well, that was me as well," said the centipede.
"So where were you during the first half?" demanded the coach.
"Well," said the centipede, "I was having my ankles taped."

RS
Mailbox

So what happened
to the regulars in the centerfold? They have been absent for weeks.
Niloy and Gohkra usually ruled and not without reason. Both wrote very
well bringing movie, games and science news to the readers in an often
funny package. Are they fired or taking a break? C'mon guys, just how
taxing could watching a movie, playing games, drooling about cars or
searching websites be?
Please come back and stop mentioning about Mars rover. We have heard
it for the umpteenth time.
Reshma Kabir
Finance student
DUReshma,
Niloy's mouse clicking forefinger probably fell off and he is waiting
for it to grow back. Gokhra accidentally watched a Dhaliwood movie and
the shock was too much but he is back this week after the recuperation.
You might think they write well but we don't like to tell them because
then they ask for more money. Anyway, one of them is back this week.
(Translate that to: "Both were on study leave, but Gokhra's back
on centre this week, and Niloy's coming back as soon as his exams are
over.")~ RS Desk ~

Speak
in a different tongue

If you go to a foreign
restaurant in a foreign country and ask the foreign waiter about their
foreign dishes, what you get might not be what you thought. What you
thought meant noodles could actually be stringy thin worms. Then you
would have to throw up in a foreign toilet. Learning a language helps
in so many ways that besides knowing dish you are ordering and which
one is the gents or ladies toilet. It is also an invaluable tool when
printed in big letter in your job resume.

So why not go to
a language club and take up a new course? The Dhaka Language Club has
opened a new branch in Dhanmondi making it easier for those living in
and around the neighbourhood. Courses offered are English, French, Spanish,
Japanese, Chinese, Arabic, Korean, Russian, Persian, German, Italian,
Malay, Swedish and even Bangla for foreigners. Their main office is
located in New DOHS.

I stood by the ocean
watched the sun sink down on its horizon
thought how calm it was
thought as if the ocean and I was in perfect harmony
I felt insignificant in its vastness
my life was like the ocean
the endurance that it endures
the pain that it feels in solitude
is the same that I secured
The ocean was so blue
like the tears in my eyes
it was so deep
like the emotion of mine inside
As I watched the sun at 'set
I realized
my life had neared to an end
and so was the time against my life
I stood by the ocean
with my arms open wide
Lost myself to the ocean
before my last breath on earth
before I would die

Written
by Naome Syed

Fun Facts

Venus is the only
planet that rotates clockwise.
Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike
factory workers in Malaysia > > > combined.
Marilyn Monroe had six toes.
Walt Disney was afraid of mice.
Pearls melt in vinegar.

Compiled
by John Doe

Do it yourself

Hey guys. The hot
days are back again. So why not drink something that is cool as well
as new? How about Gazpacho? Gazpacho is a cold soup that is usually
tomato-based. But this one is made with watermelon!!So just prepare
it and chill out.
You will need:
*Three cups of watermelon cubes with seeds removed.
*One-forth cup chopped apple.
*Half teaspoon dried basil.
*A pinch of coarsely ground pepper and chilli powder and salt.
*One teaspoon vinegar.
How to make:
Puree the watermelon in a mixer and pour into a large bowl. Add all
the other ingredients and mix. Refrigerate at least an hour before serving.

By
Farhana Anita

Very
dangerous mix

This was a story
told to us by our chemistry master at school. A female student wished
to make some potassium hydroxide solution (aqueous) and decided to throw
a large lump of potassium into a bucket of water.
Her professor observed what she was about to do, out of the corner of
his eye and hurried towards her, and after confirming this was what
she was intending to do, asked her first to stir the water in the bucket
for five minutes before adding the potassium.
She was puzzled and ran after him to ask the purpose of this action.
'It will give me time to get away' said the professor.