how do you make it work....?

So, at this point I would do just about anything to stay home with my children (12 weeks and 22 months). My oldest had been in daycare since 12 weeks and I'm going back full time next week. With both there, we are paying $900/month. Even with that expense we still need both my Husband's and my salary to cover our bills and live comfortably.... I don't see how people make it work. I just want to be the one raising my babies and don't want to feel like someone else spends the majority of their time with them! Any suggestions? Tips on what you do to make being a SAHM work? Do you plan to go back to work when they get older? I am a speech pathologist working for a non-profit.TIA

So, at this point I would do just about anything to stay home with my children (12 weeks and 22 months). My oldest had been in daycare since 12 weeks and I'm going back full time next week. With both there, we are paying $900/month. Even with that expense we still need both my Husband's and my salary to cover our bills and live comfortably.... I don't see how people make it work. I just want to be the one raising my babies and don't want to feel like someone else spends the majority of their time with them! Any suggestions? Tips on what you do to make being a SAHM work? Do you plan to go back to work when they get older? I am a speech pathologist working for a non-profit.TIA

Hey - I'm an SLP as well! I am going to be a SAHM for at least 1 year. We do have enough to do it based on the money my husband brings home. That being said, we created a budget and saw what extras we could cut out ( for us it was eating out less often), and ways we could save(clipping coupons, combining cell phone plans). I also plan to look for part time work in 6 months or so, probably through a contract agency or maybe a per diem position, so I wouldn't have to put lo in daycare, and could hopefully use a sitter or work around dh's schedule. Speech is such an awesome field! Maybe finding work that has opposite hrs of your SO so he could watch lo while you work? You could probably work less hrs since you would be saving on childcare. Hth!

Hey - I'm an SLP as well! I am going to be a SAHM for at least 1 year. We do have enough to do it based on the money my husband brings home. That being said, we created a budget and saw what extras we could cut out ( for us it was eating out less often), and ways we could save(clipping coupons, combining cell phone plans). I also plan to look for part time work in 6 months or so, probably through a contract agency or maybe a per diem position, so I wouldn't have to put lo in daycare, and could hopefully use a sitter or work around dh's schedule. Speech is such an awesome field! Maybe finding work that has opposite hrs of your SO so he could watch lo while you work? You could probably work less hrs since you would be saving on childcare. Hth!

Really depends on the definition of comfortable. We bought a small house (much less than we were approved for). We don't have any kind of cable tv. We drive inexpensive cars and ever have more than one car payment at a time. We don't use credit cards... If we don't have the money we don't get it. It is more important to me to be with my children then it is to have a big house, fancy cars, and cable tv.

Really depends on the definition of comfortable. We bought a small house (much less than we were approved for). We don't have any kind of cable tv. We drive inexpensive cars and ever have more than one car payment at a time. We don't use credit cards... If we don't have the money we don't get it. It is more important to me to be with my children then it is to have a big house, fancy cars, and cable tv.

I am breastfeeding and using cloth diapers. I garden and can we eat at home most times. I pack my husband's lunch. We don't have credit cards. We use coupons and shop in bulk. We pay cash for our used cars. We budget budget and budget some more. We make it work because it is important to both of us for me to be home for our children.

I am breastfeeding and using cloth diapers. I garden and can we eat at home most times. I pack my husband's lunch. We don't have credit cards. We use coupons and shop in bulk. We pay cash for our used cars. We budget budget and budget some more. We make it work because it is important to both of us for me to be home for our children.

Have you thought of maybe selling Mary Kay, Avon, Pampered Chef or something like that that will help you bring in some money and you'll be able to make your own schedule. That way you can spend the majority of the time with your babies but still get out of the house form some adult contact. That's what I'm thinking of doing after my 2nd baby comes in late November.

Have you thought of maybe selling Mary Kay, Avon, Pampered Chef or something like that that will help you bring in some money and you'll be able to make your own schedule. That way you can spend the majority of the time with your babies but still get out of the house form some adult contact. That's what I'm thinking of doing after my 2nd baby comes in late November.

It really depends on how you define "comfortable" and I won't lie, how much your husband brings home in relation to your bills (the essentials not the frivolous, i.e. mortgage/rent, utilities).Â

For us we sat down and wrote out how much we were spending on everything, we printed out the previous few months of account activity to have a realistic idea of where our money was going not just trying to guesstimate in our minds. From there we highlighted what we could do without, eating out less, going to the movies less, things like that. I also cut coupons and plan our menu around what coupons I have and what is on sale. It takes a bit of time and practice but if you compare prices at local stores and follow the price cycle you will find what is cheaper and when. I only go to the grocery twice a month (each pay day) to get our pre-planned menu groceries and that's it, if I don't buy it then it has to wait until next trip (for us this made a big difference because when we would go a few times a week we spent a lot more). We also buy in bulk and sign up for Amazon Mom subscribe and save for our baby needs (we save up to 25% off diapers - our son wears Pampers size 2 and the box is $45 for 174, because of the program we have it shipped to us each month automatically for $29!).Â We also do not use our credit cards, our only debt is our mortgage and car payments. We live in a smaller house than what we have been approved for (we have been approved for around $300,000 but our home is $150,000).Â

Now, I will be honest before my son was born my income wasn't much to begin with because I was just a bartender still attending college while my husband is a government contractor making over $90,000. We do have 2 brand new cars that are financed but because we budget our overall spending and live well within our means we save at least 20% of my husband's income (our goal is around 25%). So although my husband makes that much we try to live on a $50,000 salary, just in case of catastrophe and we stick to it! The only time the higher income comes into play is at Christmas (which is also our son's birthday). It takes dedication and serious budgeting but it is possible on any income level - I know couples who do it on an actual income of less than $50,000.

It really depends on how you define "comfortable" and I won't lie, how much your husband brings home in relation to your bills (the essentials not the frivolous, i.e. mortgage/rent, utilities).Â

For us we sat down and wrote out how much we were spending on everything, we printed out the previous few months of account activity to have a realistic idea of where our money was going not just trying to guesstimate in our minds. From there we highlighted what we could do without, eating out less, going to the movies less, things like that. I also cut coupons and plan our menu around what coupons I have and what is on sale. It takes a bit of time and practice but if you compare prices at local stores and follow the price cycle you will find what is cheaper and when. I only go to the grocery twice a month (each pay day) to get our pre-planned menu groceries and that's it, if I don't buy it then it has to wait until next trip (for us this made a big difference because when we would go a few times a week we spent a lot more). We also buy in bulk and sign up for Amazon Mom subscribe and save for our baby needs (we save up to 25% off diapers - our son wears Pampers size 2 and the box is $45 for 174, because of the program we have it shipped to us each month automatically for $29!).Â We also do not use our credit cards, our only debt is our mortgage and car payments. We live in a smaller house than what we have been approved for (we have been approved for around $300,000 but our home is $150,000).Â

Now, I will be honest before my son was born my income wasn't much to begin with because I was just a bartender still attending college while my husband is a government contractor making over $90,000. We do have 2 brand new cars that are financed but because we budget our overall spending and live well within our means we save at least 20% of my husband's income (our goal is around 25%). So although my husband makes that much we try to live on a $50,000 salary, just in case of catastrophe and we stick to it! The only time the higher income comes into play is at Christmas (which is also our son's birthday). It takes dedication and serious budgeting but it is possible on any income level - I know couples who do it on an actual income of less than $50,000.

I've typed up a lot of ideas on how to cut back (both minor and major ways) on my website. I'm asked these sorts of questions all the time, so rather then type it over and over, I just put all of my ideas on a website! Just check this link:

In addition to this (things I have yet to add on my website), there are also lots of ways to cut back around the house. For example, did you know that baking soda has dozens upon dozens of uses? Here's just a few:

AMAZING hair cleanser

Helps to remove grease from dishes/BBQs/etc

Great for removing grime from sinks/tubs/toilets

Effective for polishing silverwear

Odor eliminator on carpets, in the dishwater and in shoes

So for a good hair cleanser, grease remover, household cleaner, polish and deodorizers you can expect to pay perhaps what...$25. Two boxes of baking soda can handle all of those chores and at Walmart you can buy large boxes for only $1.11 each. So $2.22 vs $25...THERE'S your savings.

There are also other household items which have many different uses. If you have rolled oats (the natural stuff, not the flavored kid's brands) you also have yourself an effective bath soak which is great for your skin and you also have a very effective anti-itch paste which will work just as good as any expensive store bought brand. (instructions for this will be on my website soon!)

Hope this helps! :)

A lot of sacrifices, budgeting, couponing and tricks of the trade. ;)

I've typed up a lot of ideas on how to cut back (both minor and major ways) on my website. I'm asked these sorts of questions all the time, so rather then type it over and over, I just put all of my ideas on a website! Just check this link:

In addition to this (things I have yet to add on my website), there are also lots of ways to cut back around the house. For example, did you know that baking soda has dozens upon dozens of uses? Here's just a few:

AMAZING hair cleanser

Helps to remove grease from dishes/BBQs/etc

Great for removing grime from sinks/tubs/toilets

Effective for polishing silverwear

Odor eliminator on carpets, in the dishwater and in shoes

So for a good hair cleanser, grease remover, household cleaner, polish and deodorizers you can expect to pay perhaps what...$25. Two boxes of baking soda can handle all of those chores and at Walmart you can buy large boxes for only $1.11 each. So $2.22 vs $25...THERE'S your savings.

There are also other household items which have many different uses. If you have rolled oats (the natural stuff, not the flavored kid's brands) you also have yourself an effective bath soak which is great for your skin and you also have a very effective anti-itch paste which will work just as good as any expensive store bought brand. (instructions for this will be on my website soon!)

To be honest - I think it comes to prioritizing. My husband is a graduate student and we are living on his salary in the 6th most expensive city in the world (Geneva). I do not have a work visa, so working is not an option. Prior to moving I was a part-time FNP.Â

We don't eat out - occasionally we get pizza from theÂ restaurantÂ at my husband's work (1-2x/month). We don't have coupons, so I just try and budget our meals well. They're not always asÂ glamorousÂ as things I would make at home, but they are nutritious and tasty.Â

Our biggest expense is housing - we opted to live in a one-bedroom (with a 2 year old). We are paying the same amount that we paid for our 3.5 bedroom in the States. We also only have one car here (paid off) and my husband rides his bike to work (part of the reason our rent is higher) or I drive him. AnÂ adjustmentÂ for our 2 car family.

The cutting back on clothes shopping and food shopping have been the hardest for me. I love buying new clothes - nothing terribly expensive, but I loved a pick me up from Target!Â

Anyways, I'm sure that many of these other ladies have better advice and more experience - but it can be done, I'm proof ;)Â Â

To be honest - I think it comes to prioritizing. My husband is a graduate student and we are living on his salary in the 6th most expensive city in the world (Geneva). I do not have a work visa, so working is not an option. Prior to moving I was a part-time FNP.Â

We don't eat out - occasionally we get pizza from theÂ restaurantÂ at my husband's work (1-2x/month). We don't have coupons, so I just try and budget our meals well. They're not always asÂ glamorousÂ as things I would make at home, but they are nutritious and tasty.Â

Our biggest expense is housing - we opted to live in a one-bedroom (with a 2 year old). We are paying the same amount that we paid for our 3.5 bedroom in the States. We also only have one car here (paid off) and my husband rides his bike to work (part of the reason our rent is higher) or I drive him. AnÂ adjustmentÂ for our 2 car family.

The cutting back on clothes shopping and food shopping have been the hardest for me. I love buying new clothes - nothing terribly expensive, but I loved a pick me up from Target!Â

Anyways, I'm sure that many of these other ladies have better advice and more experience - but it can be done, I'm proof ;)Â Â

for us it was the smart choice. i was only working part time and after paying daycare (for one at the time) and gas in my truck i wasnt bringing that much in. so when we planned on having number 2 we our extra car payed off the truck and didnt really "need" my income plus we get more time together and hubby can work more hours. so no we dont have new cars r wear designer clothes but im raising my babies

for us it was the smart choice. i was only working part time and after paying daycare (for one at the time) and gas in my truck i wasnt bringing that much in. so when we planned on having number 2 we our extra car payed off the truck and didnt really "need" my income plus we get more time together and hubby can work more hours. so no we dont have new cars r wear designer clothes but im raising my babies

I will work when my kids are older. For now, we make it work by doing what the previous ladies suggested. We live a fine life, but it's no frills. Do the math on how much you actually after taxes. Subtract out daycare, extra expenses related to working (gas, eating out, etc), then see what the difference is. Then look at your budget and see what you could cut back. Even trimming $10/day from your budget could make a big difference. For some people that just means packing lunch rather than eating out.

I will work when my kids are older. For now, we make it work by doing what the previous ladies suggested. We live a fine life, but it's no frills. Do the math on how much you actually after taxes. Subtract out daycare, extra expenses related to working (gas, eating out, etc), then see what the difference is. Then look at your budget and see what you could cut back. Even trimming $10/day from your budget could make a big difference. For some people that just means packing lunch rather than eating out.

I dont want to steal the OP, but I am reading all comments and I have a follow up question. Maybe with all the siggestions above we could somehow make it on one income. But what about my career? I am making pretty good money but I really want to be the one raising my children. I am really afraid that going back to work will be next to impossible if I have been out of a job for 8-10 years. Plus loosing all the benefits(401k, health INS, etc) will really hit me hard... Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with these type of issues?

I dont want to steal the OP, but I am reading all comments and I have a follow up question. Maybe with all the siggestions above we could somehow make it on one income. But what about my career? I am making pretty good money but I really want to be the one raising my children. I am really afraid that going back to work will be next to impossible if I have been out of a job for 8-10 years. Plus loosing all the benefits(401k, health INS, etc) will really hit me hard... Does anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with these type of issues?

I am in the same position. I get paid really well and have all of the benefits. I have decided that it is totally worth it for me to give it all up for a while to be with my little girl. I can handle being behind and getting back Into my career but I can't handle not raising my lo. Sorry, not much of a choice for me. I know there are women that have kids and continue on with their FT careers but it isn't me.

I am in the same position. I get paid really well and have all of the benefits. I have decided that it is totally worth it for me to give it all up for a while to be with my little girl. I can handle being behind and getting back Into my career but I can't handle not raising my lo. Sorry, not much of a choice for me. I know there are women that have kids and continue on with their FT careers but it isn't me.

Regarding getting back into the workforce later, may I suggest the book What Color Is Your Parachute? Great advice about networking and career.But I especially love his view that every job hunter has a "handicap" when it comes to career, and your role in job hunting is to find the employers who are not turned off by what you perceive as your handicap, and ignore the rest -- but there WILL be those who want you. I told my mom this a few years ago. It encouraged her and she applied for and got a job she ended up loving, after several years not working, and she was in her sixties.

That said, it is hard for us SAHMs to leave work we enjoy. That is our tradeoff for a few years, I guess.

Regarding getting back into the workforce later, may I suggest the book What Color Is Your Parachute? Great advice about networking and career.But I especially love his view that every job hunter has a "handicap" when it comes to career, and your role in job hunting is to find the employers who are not turned off by what you perceive as your handicap, and ignore the rest -- but there WILL be those who want you. I told my mom this a few years ago. It encouraged her and she applied for and got a job she ended up loving, after several years not working, and she was in her sixties.

That said, it is hard for us SAHMs to leave work we enjoy. That is our tradeoff for a few years, I guess.

I stayed home while my older three children now 13,15,17 were little. Â We survived on $12 an hour. Â Honestly I am not sure I how we did it. Â I then went back to work full time as a loan office making about 40,000 a year. Â When I found out i was pregnant with my 4th child who is now 14 months old my new husband and I decided it was extremely important for me to stay home with her and with the older kids too.Â

We moved out of our rental house which we were paying $1000 a month and used some of our investments and bought a 2200 sq foot forclosed house for 60,000 and dropped our housepayment down to $600 a month. Â We sold both of our cars that equaled $760 a month in loan payments and used the extra money from selling them to buy two cars outright. Â Neither of them are awesome but they both run and are reliable. Â I started using coupons and buying groceries when they were on sale instead of when I needed them and stocked up. Â My grocery bill has gone from over $700 a month to $250 for a family of 6 including diapers and formula. Â I shop at mom2mom sales and consignment shops for all our clothes and furniture stuff. Â We got rid of cable. Â I also grew a garden this year and have been canning everything I can.

All in all We have dropped our monthly expenses by about $2000 a month which is more than I was making in my job. Â Â

I also work 12 hours a week for my local elementary school for a little extra money for me.

I thought my older kids would have a huge issue with all the cutbacks and sacrifices we had to make for me to stay home but I am proud and amazed that they have started cutting back on the things they buy also. Â They all say that they love having me home when they get home or to help run them to their activities much more than the material things.

I personally think that if you really work at it most family can survive on one income. Â It is difficult and takes a lot of sacrifice but for our family it has brought us closer together and taught us all a little bit about money management and the difference between wants and needs.Â Â Â

Â

I stayed home while my older three children now 13,15,17 were little. Â We survived on $12 an hour. Â Honestly I am not sure I how we did it. Â I then went back to work full time as a loan office making about 40,000 a year. Â When I found out i was pregnant with my 4th child who is now 14 months old my new husband and I decided it was extremely important for me to stay home with her and with the older kids too.Â

We moved out of our rental house which we were paying $1000 a month and used some of our investments and bought a 2200 sq foot forclosed house for 60,000 and dropped our housepayment down to $600 a month. Â We sold both of our cars that equaled $760 a month in loan payments and used the extra money from selling them to buy two cars outright. Â Neither of them are awesome but they both run and are reliable. Â I started using coupons and buying groceries when they were on sale instead of when I needed them and stocked up. Â My grocery bill has gone from over $700 a month to $250 for a family of 6 including diapers and formula. Â I shop at mom2mom sales and consignment shops for all our clothes and furniture stuff. Â We got rid of cable. Â I also grew a garden this year and have been canning everything I can.

All in all We have dropped our monthly expenses by about $2000 a month which is more than I was making in my job. Â Â

I also work 12 hours a week for my local elementary school for a little extra money for me.

I thought my older kids would have a huge issue with all the cutbacks and sacrifices we had to make for me to stay home but I am proud and amazed that they have started cutting back on the things they buy also. Â They all say that they love having me home when they get home or to help run them to their activities much more than the material things.

I personally think that if you really work at it most family can survive on one income. Â It is difficult and takes a lot of sacrifice but for our family it has brought us closer together and taught us all a little bit about money management and the difference between wants and needs.Â Â Â

I stayed home while my older three children now 13,15,17 were little. Â We survived on $12 an hour. Â Honestly I am not sure I how we did it. Â I then went back to work full time as a loan office making about 40,000 a year. Â When I found out i was pregnant with my 4th child who is now 14 months old my new husband and I decided it was extremely important for me to stay home with her and with the older kids too.Â

We moved out of our rental house which we were paying $1000 a month and used some of our investments and bought a 2200 sq foot forclosed house for 60,000 and dropped our housepayment down to $600 a month. Â We sold both of our cars that equaled $760 a month in loan payments and used the extra money from selling them to buy two cars outright. Â Neither of them are awesome but they both run and are reliable. Â I started using coupons and buying groceries when they were on sale instead of when I needed them and stocked up. Â My grocery bill has gone from over $700 a month to $250 for a family of 6 including diapers and formula. Â I shop at mom2mom sales and consignment shops for all our clothes and furniture stuff. Â We got rid of cable. Â I also grew a garden this year and have been canning everything I can.

All in all We have dropped our monthly expenses by about $2000 a month which is more than I was making in my job. Â Â

I also work 12 hours a week for my local elementary school for a little extra money for me.

I thought my older kids would have a huge issue with all the cutbacks and sacrifices we had to make for me to stay home but I am proud and amazed that they have started cutting back on the things they buy also. Â They all say that they love having me home when they get home or to help run them to their activities much more than the material things.

I personally think that if you really work at it most family can survive on one income. Â It is difficult and takes a lot of sacrifice but for our family it has brought us closer together and taught us all a little bit about money management and the difference between wants and needs.Â Â Â

Â

I stayed home while my older three children now 13,15,17 were little. Â We survived on $12 an hour. Â Honestly I am not sure I how we did it. Â I then went back to work full time as a loan office making about 40,000 a year. Â When I found out i was pregnant with my 4th child who is now 14 months old my new husband and I decided it was extremely important for me to stay home with her and with the older kids too.Â

We moved out of our rental house which we were paying $1000 a month and used some of our investments and bought a 2200 sq foot forclosed house for 60,000 and dropped our housepayment down to $600 a month. Â We sold both of our cars that equaled $760 a month in loan payments and used the extra money from selling them to buy two cars outright. Â Neither of them are awesome but they both run and are reliable. Â I started using coupons and buying groceries when they were on sale instead of when I needed them and stocked up. Â My grocery bill has gone from over $700 a month to $250 for a family of 6 including diapers and formula. Â I shop at mom2mom sales and consignment shops for all our clothes and furniture stuff. Â We got rid of cable. Â I also grew a garden this year and have been canning everything I can.

All in all We have dropped our monthly expenses by about $2000 a month which is more than I was making in my job. Â Â

I also work 12 hours a week for my local elementary school for a little extra money for me.

I thought my older kids would have a huge issue with all the cutbacks and sacrifices we had to make for me to stay home but I am proud and amazed that they have started cutting back on the things they buy also. Â They all say that they love having me home when they get home or to help run them to their activities much more than the material things.

I personally think that if you really work at it most family can survive on one income. Â It is difficult and takes a lot of sacrifice but for our family it has brought us closer together and taught us all a little bit about money management and the difference between wants and needs.Â Â Â

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