When you’re
distracted from creating and living a meaningful and positive life, the matrix
wins. When you’ve no time to give to imagining what this life might look like
or feel like if you were in control, the matrix wins.

It’s not
that the matrix is a top-down conspiracy led by a round table of cigar smoking
suits. It’s really a system of compliance, complacency and comfort. In other
words, we all contribute to it in our own way. With our own free will, we all
put bricks in this wall, because it’s what everyone else is doing, and we feel
like it’s what we should also be doing.

This is the
whole paradigm of consumer living, celebrity culture, the endless drama of political
spectacle, and the endless desire to stand out in the herd. Think of the social
media corral and what a waste of energy all that is.

If you’re
paying attention to your life, though, you eventually see through this.

All of the
conspiracy theories, bad news, world events, suppressed history, and collective
speculation at some point must be recognized as necessary stepping-stones on
your way to total awakening.

Their
purpose in your soul journey is to jolt you out of contemporary consciousness and get you looking at the
reality of your life, the brevity of it, and the pressing need to move on with being
yourself in spite of any and all forces that wish to conquer and control your
spirit.

It’s a
process of outgrowing the matrix, and if you’re really paying attention you’ll
instinctively know when it’s time to jump ship and move beyond these narratives
and false realities. Your intuition will tell you when you’ve had enough and
when it’s time to move on.

Carl Jung’s
work details a process he referred to as individuation, which is a keen way of
looking at this. The matrix is the group and we are trained to be members of
this herd. But this is not our truest nature. Deep down, we are spiritual
beings, capable of infinite levels of individuality and awareness, but when
this awareness is choked down and focused on the material here and now, being
part of the herd is what feels good. Until it doesn’t, then you’re on your own.
Blissfully on your own, carving your own path and creating your own trail.

So, have you
spiritually outgrown the matrix yet? Has your spirit seen enough and learned
enough to tell the difference between an existence in the rabbit hole and an
existence in the realm of infinite possibility?

Is your
spirit ready to fly above and beyond the walls of the psychological prison
ensnaring most of us?

It’s
perfectly OK if it has not. It will someday, though, so hang on and don’t give
up.

In my
experience as a member of the alternative media, I’ve learned that the vast
majority of people out there are still seeking confirmation of their worst
fears in the morass of endless information available to us. And it’s often the
darkest and lowest of frequencies that have the most gravity and the most pull.
The gnarly stuff pulls us in and works to keep us down.

It’s our
job, however, as individuals to evolve beyond this and rise above this. When we
do, the fear is the first thing to go, and true freedom is the first reward.

Not to beat
to death the metaphor of the matrix, but there is a short scene in the Matrix
Trilogy which puts images to this idea. Food for thought, so enjoy.

About the
Author

Dylan Charles is the editor of Waking Times and co-host of Redesigning Reality, both dedicated to ideas of personal transformation, societal awakening, and planetary renewal. His personal journey is deeply inspired by shamanic plant medicines and the arts of Kung Fu, Qi Gong and Yoga. After seven years of living in Costa Rica, he now lives in the Blue Ridge Mountains, where he practices Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and enjoys spending time with family. He has written hundreds of articles, reaching and inspiring millions of people around the world.

Feeling Alone: 13 Ways To Stop Feeling So Lonely And Isolated

You’re surrounded by people. They’re laughing, smiling, and talking. Everyone seems to be having a great time – they all seem to feel so connected with each other. But no matter how much you want that feeling, you can’t help but feel completely alone.

A sense of heaviness and hollowness may fill your chest as you watch them all:

“I am alone, completely and utterly alone. Nobody can truly see me. No one truly understands me. No one even cares. I make no difference to them. I am not like them at all.”

Your thoughts may spiral as the emptiness you feel becomes more and more suffocating.

Can you relate to these feelings?

Can you relate to being in a room full of people but feeling totally alone and isolated inside?

If so, I want to assure you that you’re not alone.

So many people (myself included) have grappled with extreme loneliness during life. But although this experience can be so hard to cope with, there is help and there are solutions.

By the end of this article, you should have a good understanding of why you feel lonely and what you can do about it.

Aloneness Can Actually Be Empowering

Here’s the thing: being alone isn’t always a horribly negative thing.

I know this may sound crazy. But hear me out.

“Being alone isn’t always a bad thing because aloneness (or solitude) can help us figure out who we are, do some vital soul searching, and take a break from the insanity of the world.”

Aloneness can be something refreshing, rejuvenating, and open a door into deep inner insight.

Not only can being alone help us figure out who we are at a core level, but it can actually empower us to walk the path less travelled and find our true meaning of life.

Why Aloneness Becomes Loneliness…

Being alone becomes feeling lonely when we can’t find the bridge of connectedness back to humanity.

Aloneness becomes loneliness when we undergo a bout of mental illness, existential crisis, or spiritual awakening that has been so extreme we feel like aliens on this planet.

When you are going through a life crisis or the process of spiritual awakening, you will feel displaced in this world. You’ll come to see through the lies and illusions of society. You’ll see through the “normalized insanity” of other people and will find no interest in what they value. You’ll feel displaced, stripped bare, and deeply isolated from those around you.

You’re Not Going Crazy

You may wonder whether you’re the only one on the planet who feels this way, who feels so isolated and lonely. Perhaps, even a small part of you may wonder if you’re going crazy or if there’s something deeply broken or wrong about you.

There isn’t.

What you are going through is perfectly normal in the context of what you’re experiencing. And no, you’re not alone. I have felt the horrible vacuum of existential loneliness, and I have spoken with and witnessed many others who feel the same way.

There Are Others Like You + You Can Use These Feelings to Your Advantage…

“There is a group of people out there like you.”

They too feel lonely. They too have lost touch with all their friends and possibly even family. They too feel disconnected from the world.

Although you may feel incapacitated with despair or the gnawing feeling of desolation, please know that you can use these feelings to your advantage.

You can use your loneliness to become stronger, braver, and wiser.

You can tap into your inner wolf that is the primal force within you that knows how to survive on scarce human contact and thrive when life becomes dark and barren.

We’ll explore how to get in touch with that inner wolf soon. But first, let’s demystify and de-pathologies loneliness and reveal just how normal it is.

Is Feeling Alone Normal?

It might feel like you’re the only one experiencing loneliness. But you’re not. YES, it is normal to feel alone – and many people struggle with it.

Here are some stats:

According to a recent study, nearly half of all Americans feel lonely. And in the same study, loneliness was found to affect younger people more than older people.

In Australia, a study conducted found that 1 in 4 Australians feel lonelyat least one day a week. Again, the stereotype that elderly people are those who feel the loneliest is false. In reality, international research has found that loneliness tends to be the most common among those between the ages of 16 and 25.

In the UK, 9 million people (nearly one-fifth of the population) report that they are always or often lonely, with almost two-thirds disclosing that they feel uncomfortable admitting it.

Isn’t that amazing? And also tragic?

While these statistics aren’t meant to improve your situation, I hope they help to normalize it. Feeling alone is an experience shared by millions of people worldwide from all backgrounds, ages, and cultures. It’s actually more common than we think it is.

7 Signs You’re Feeling Alone

“That’s where loneliness comes from, it isn’t the lack of company that makes us feel lonely, it’s this feeling of emptiness, of having nothing, of extraordinary uncertainty, frustration and a deep inner void…all that is felt when personal meaning is lacking, so we try to distract it, with books, movies, games, socializing, careers, anything to escape facing that void, from focusing our attention within and what is causing our inner black hole. We need distractions from the void, books, movies, socializing, careers, to escape that emptiness we feel within.” – Krishnamurti

True loneliness is different from being lonesome – which is what most people experience at some point. Lonesomeness is the feeling of mild discomfort a person has when they spend their Saturday night watching a movie alone when they wish someone was there to share the experience with them.

Loneliness, on the other hand, is chronic. It’s not a temporary feeling that comes and goes: it’s there all the time like a shadow following you around.

So are you feeling alone? Pay attention to these signs:

You feel lonely in a crowd of people

You crave quality human interaction

You feel disappointed with your relationships – you don’t feel a deep sense of connection with others that you crave for

You tend to shop a lot or binge (to avoid the loneliness you carry inside)

You struggle to relate to others and feel very different from your peers

You often feel sad or depressed

Physically, you may carry a feeling of that there’s an empty hole or void inside of you

How many signs can you relate to? Obviously, the more signs you resonate with, the more lonely you probably feel. Also, it’s okay if you’re experiencing something that isn’t included on this list (it’s just as important and valid).

Why Do I Feel So Alone?

There are many reasons why you may feel alone and disconnected from other people. You might have experienced:

The death of a loved one

Changing environments, countries, workplaces, etc.

Not fitting in with those around you

Being a primary carer of someone with a disability

Divorce

Mental illness (anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, etc.)

Physical disability (loss of hearing, sight, movement, etc.)

Racism or LGBT discrimination

If you feel severely lonely – and have for most of your life – this might be due to:

If you feel severely lonely, I strongly encourage you to seek out a therapist (I recommend searching for those who are trauma-informed). While this article can help to give you a place to start, working through trauma-related issues is beyond the scope of what I present here. Trauma-trained spiritual counselors and therapists will help provide space, compassion, and tools for you to heal.

Also, keep in mind that it’s perfectly normal to feel lonely without any clear reason. Even if everything feels fine in your life, suddenly feeling alone out of the blue is not unheard of. Often, the feeling will pass quickly. But if it becomes persistent, it’s time to do some soul searching.

The Spiritual Cause of Feeling Alone

“If you were to ask for an antidote to the anguish of human loneliness, I would suggest that you reencounter and re-examine the connection that unites us with the earth, our lost ‘umbilical cord’. I would invite you to recognize the presence of an inexhaustible love that remains unaffected by human affairs. It is not so difficult. Look around, remember the being that sustains us, and realize you are at home, always at home.” – The Teachings of Don Carlos

If you’re not interested in the metaphysical, I recommend that you skip this part.

However, if you’d like to discover the underlying spiritual cause of feeling alone, stick around. I’ll try to be brief.

As spiritual beings having a human experience, our connection to the Divine is just as important as our connection to everyday tasks. We are not just meat suits walking around getting shit done: there is a deeper essence, a mysterious spark within all of us. That deeper essence is the Soul, which is part of the Great Spirit (or Life Force) that runs through all things.

Soul Loss and The Dark Night of the Soul

When we are disconnected from our Souls, we feel alone. This spiritual disconnection is called soul loss, and it’s a great epidemic in our current society.

Soul loss occurs when we have lost touch with that Divine essence within us. When life becomes all about the mundane and material, we can feel like something is missing. This sensation of something being fundamentally “off” hides the craving to unite with something deeper and more meaningful.

If you’re currently feeling alone and are going through an existential crisis (where you’re wondering what the point of life is), you might be experiencing something called the Dark Night of the Soul. When we become aware of our soul loss and become conscious of what we’re truly missing out on, it’s common to go through this gloomy and depressing period known as the Dark Night. If you need more guidance, I recommend that you check out our Dark Night of the Soul article.

“When going through a dark night, at first, you may feel cut off and alone. Clients in therapy often say they feel isolated and have no one to talk to. They may come to therapy specifically to deal with their isolation. They may wish for deep human connection…”

The Ego

Finally, feeling alone is also part and parcel of having an ego – or a clear sense of self, of “me.” By nature, when we are capable of differentiating ourselves from others, the possibility of feeling alone arises. Animals and very young children don’t often exhibit signs of loneliness for a similar reason: they don’t possess an ego. As such, they feel connected to everything. Life happens fully in the present moment and there is a sense of merging with life.

While not having an ego isn’t the solution here (as it’s impossible unless you become enlightened), becoming mindful of your ego and how it influences you is. We’ll explore how to become more self-aware of your thoughts below.

How to Deal With Loneliness

Feeling alone doesn’t have to be a life sentence.

Although you may feel hopeless, unmotivated, and as though you’ll never connect with anyone meaningfully, remember that this is the inner sceptic/judge talking.

No matter how bad the loneliness gets, remember that you have a primal spark of life inside of you (otherwise, you wouldn’t be living and breathing!). This primal source of energy can take many names and forms, but we choose to see it as the inner wolf.

Your inner wolf is your inner guardian, protector, warrior, and primal source of instinct, intuition, and insight. S/he is the fire within you that keeps going, no matter what, no matter how hard it feels.

Below, I’ll show you how to get in touch with your inner wolf. I’ll also offer other practices you can explore:

1. Creatively express your inner wolf

Your inner wolf will empower you to move through your loneliness without drowning in it. S/he will provide you with a sense of strength, helping you to get in touch with your warrior energy.

One of the best ways to reconnect with this primal force of nature inside of you is through art. You don’t need to be good at drawing to benefit from this practice (it’s irrelevant). Just do your best and draw what you feel.

Art activates the right side of the brain which is connected to creativity and the inner child. Art is also symbolic in nature, so it has a powerful impact on your unconscious mind. This, in turn, can help you quickly move from feelings of powerlessness and desolation, to empowerment and vitality.

For this activity, find a blank piece of paper and some pencils. If you only have a pen handy, that’s fine too. Set aside some time to draw your inner wolf. What does s/he look like? What is the name of your inner wolf? How old is s/he? Draw whatever feels right to you and most importantly, try not to think about it too much.

Once you’re finished, notice how you feel. It’s okay if you don’t feel much of a change – with time, you will. Keep your drawing somewhere important in your house that you’ll see every day. This will help to prime/condition your mind to remember your warrior spirit. You carry a force of nature inside of you and it will help you get through these tough times.

2. Visualize meeting your inner wolf

Another way to manage your loneliness and reconnect with a feeling of inner strength and connectedness is through visualization.

Visualizing can be as easy and simple as you like, or as complex as your heart desires. I recommend keeping your visualization short, sweet, and simple.

To begin your visualization, go into a dark room and put on some atmospheric music. You might like to put on some haunting wolf howls or music that reminds you of the inner warrior. (Search YouTube.)

Lie down and take a few deep breaths to ground yourself and relax. Once you’re ready, let your mind drift off with the music.

“Imagine you’re walking down a staircase and at the bottom is the entrance of a forest. As you walk into the forest, you hear a howl in the distance. You keep walking, knowing you’re completely safe and watch as the trees sway and creak around you. Ahead you sense a presence behind a tree. A wolf suddenly emerges and looks at you straight in the eyes. You stop and look back. What does the wolf look like? Drink in the image. If you have any questions, you may like to ask the wolf. Spend some time acquainting yourself with him/her. When you’re finished, thank your inner wolf, say goodbye, and walk back up the staircase to normal waking reality.“

You might like to spend some time journaling about your experience. How did you feel? What did your inner wolf tell you? Remember, one major reason why we feel lonely is that we’re disconnected from our inner selves and our source of power.Reconnecting with your inner wolf in this way will help to motivate you and show you that there is hope and you can connect with others like you. It will just take some time and effort.

General Advice

Once you’ve reconnected with your inner source of power (the inner wolf), you’ll find it easier to put the following general pieces of advice in action.

These tips will help you move through your feelings of loneliness:

3. Take baby steps

If you’re alone and isolated, start small. Throwing yourself into the deep end with other people may be too overwhelming – which could lead to self-isolation. In order to take baby steps, carry out your daily tasks in places where there are people. If you need to walk your dog, for instance, go to the local dog park where other dog owners might be. If you need to do groceries, make small talk with the shop assistants. If you need to exercise more, consider signing up to the local gym. You get the picture.

4. Replace unkind thoughts and repeat gentle ones

When we feel alone, it’s easy to start berating and criticizing ourselves. We may think that we’re “losers,” “recluses,” “broken,” “stunted,” “will never have friends,” etc. If you start feeling horrible about yourself and slip into self-loathing, try to find the underlying thought. Then, replace it with something kinder like “I am a caring and interesting person, and I deserve friends” “I can do this,” “It’s okay to take socializing slowly,” or “I love myself no matter what.” At first, you may feel a bit ridiculous, but when you keep affirming the same gentle thought, you are slowly rewiring your brain.

One of the most powerful ways to use affirmations is through something called mirror work. To practice mirror work, find a mirror in your house, and ensure you have a bit of privacy. As you stand in front of the mirror, take a few conscious breaths and try to relax your body a bit. Gaze into your eyes gently and repeat your affirmation. You can say your affirmation out loud or in your mind, just do what feels comfortable.

It’s normal to experience strong emotions while doing mirror work. Please allow yourself to feel them in an open and non-judgmental way. You might even like to give yourself a hug as you stand in front of the mirror. After about five or ten minutes, finish your mirror work session. I encourage you to practice this ten minutes every day for two weeks and see how you feel!

5. Think about your deepest interests and values

One of the biggest reasons why we feel alone is because we struggle to find other like-minded people. The best way to remedy that is to develop a bit of self-understanding. What are you passionate about? What areas of life interest you? What are your dreams and values? When you answer these questions, you’ll be able to find little pockets of society that you can explore – and perhaps feel a sense of belonging in.

For instance, if you highly value animal rights and love being around dogs, why not volunteer at your local dog shelter? Or you might even like to go to a dog training course in your community. Another example is art and crafts. If you love making things, why not sign up to a local art class?

6. Volunteer your time

It feels good to help people. Helping those less fortunate than you can also help to put your life in perspective. To volunteer, grab your local newspaper or go to your neighbourhood’s website. If you can’t find any volunteer listings, your local library and nursing home most likely accept volunteers. If there’s a homeless shelter nearby, you can also try volunteering your time there as well.

7. Get a pet (or cuddle one you have already)

Many people who experience loneliness benefit greatly from having something to nurture and take care of. If you don’t have a pet, why not check out your local animal shelter? It’s much kinder to give an animal a second chance than to purchase one from the pet store. Alternatively, find your cat, dog, rabbit, etc. and give them a big cuddle. Hugging releases happy hormones in the brain and helps you to feel calm and relaxed.

8. Learn a new skill or take a self-help course

One great and productive way to connect with others is through learning a new skill. For instance, if you’ve always been interested in counselling, why not take a counselling course? If you see an ad for a meditation or yoga class, why not go?

9. Go to a support group

If you struggle with a disability, illness or mental health issue, try to find out whether there are any support groups in your community. It feels so nice to be seen and heard. To have someone hold space for you can be wonderfully nourishing and healing. If you’re nervous about going, talk to the organizer beforehand. Ensure that the group is confidential and doesn’t demand a response from you unless you’re ready to talk.

10. Practice self-compassion and self-care

Feeling alone can be one of the hardest things you ever go through. Be caring toward yourself. Listen to your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual needs as much as possible. Practicing self-care could be as simple as making yourself a soothing cup of tea, going out in nature, or getting adequate sleep. Self-compassion is about treating yourself with love and understanding. If you need help, see our article on how to love yourself.

11. Create a spiritual practice

Don’t surrender your loneliness so quickly.

Let it cut you more deep.

Let it ferment and season you

as few humans and even

divine ingredients can.

– Hafiz

Try to reconnect with the magic and beauty of life again. Although feeling alone can suck, it’s an experience that can actually be harnessed to further your spiritual growth. Some of the wisest and most illuminated souls in history were those who experienced extended periods of solitude. Furthermore, when you connect with your spirit guides, ancestors, and archetypal mentors, the feeling of loneliness can often significantly subside. You may also like to connect with your Soul on a daily basis through meditation, ritual, art, music, prayer, nature immersion, or other sacred practices that call to you.

12. Journal about how you feel

Writing down your thoughts and feelings is a wonderful way to create some inner clarity. When we feel alone, it’s common to have an excess of energy because we don’t have many people to talk to. Try to expel some of that energy through writing. You don’t need to be a talented writer or even good at spelling to journal. Simply express all that you feel in an unfiltered way. Journaling can be a great catharsis, particularly when you feel intense loneliness or despair.

13. Work with your inner child

If you experience chronic loneliness (that lasts for years), it’s likely you have undergone significant trauma as a child. You can read our article on inner child work to get started. But when it comes to trauma, it’s best to find a counsellor or therapist to help work through your pain. Please consider this option seriously as it can have an extremely good and transformational impact on your life. I recommend finding a therapist who specializes in trauma. One great approach is something called somatic experiencing. So if you need a place to start, look up some somatic experiencing practitioners in your area.

Perhaps one of the simplest ways to help with your feelings of loneliness is to recognize the shared humanity of it. What you’re experiencing is part of the human condition. Millions of people around the world only have the cat or TV for company – or worse, nothing and no one at all.

You are not alone. You are not broken. And yes, there is hope.

In many cases, being alone can be a positive thing as it helps you to hear the voice of your soul better. But if it’s becoming too much for you, connect with your inner source of power (your inner wolf). Understand that you have a warrior within you, and you can make it through anything life throws at you.

About the Author

Mateo Sol is a prominent psychospiritual teacher whose work has influenced the lives of thousands of people worldwide. Born into a family with a history of drug addiction, schizophrenia, and mental illness, Mateo Sol was taught about the plight of the human condition from a young age. As a spiritual guide and teacher, Sol’s mission is to help others experience freedom, wholeness, and peace in any stage of life. See more of his work at lonerwolf.com.

A Sunrise Prayer To Start Your Day

I came across this Taoist prayer at just the right time – on a morning that felt particularly challenging.

As a global tribe, many of us struggle to maintain our sense of sanity in the midst of the chaos, suffering and unrest that is unfortunately part of the reality we meet in our news feeds, and in our cities and towns. Yes, it’s important that we acknowledge the truth of what is happening in the world around us, but we also need to give ourselves the space (and permission) to simply be alive and attentive to the cosmic dance that is unfolding around us.

We can turn to the sages and wisdom-keepers of our ancestral past to help jog our individual and collective memory on how to do this.

I printed this out and taped it to our bathroom mirror, so I would see it every morning.

I hope this prayer is helpful for you too!

The Sunrise Prayer

All we need is the morning.As long as there is sunrise,then there is the possibilitythat we can face all of our misfortunes,celebrate all our blessings,and live all our endeavors as human beings.

Spirituality is something that has becomenecessary in these troubled times.Yet it is inherently superfluous.We need it to remind ourselves,to bolster ourselves,to integrate ourselves,to fulfill ourselves.

If we could simply acknowledgethe mystery of nightand the glory of morning,we would need neither civilization nor spirituality.At its simplest, life begins with dawn.That is blessing enough.All else becomes fullness immeasurable.

At dawn, kneel down and give thanksfor this wonderful event.We may think mornings are so commonthey are unworthy of veneration,but do you realize most places in the cosmosdo not have mornings?This daily event is our supreme goodness.

Greet the dawn.That is your miracle to witness.That is the ultimate beauty.That is sacredness.That is your gift from heaven.That is your omen of prophesy.That is knowledge that life is not futile.That is enlightenment.That is your meaning in life.That is your directive.That is your comfort.That is the solemnity of duty.That is inspiration for compassion.That is the light of the ultimate.”

— Deng Ming-Dao

I was really struck by the line: “We may think mornings are so common they are unworthy of veneration, but do you realize most places in the cosmos do not have mornings?”

When was the last time you rose early to watch the sun come up?

Greeting the day with a quiet mind and clear intention is a powerful way to start your day and receive new perspective on any challenge you face.

3 African Proverbs To Live By

My culture has nourished me in ways I could have never imagined. The wisdom that my family and ancestors carry has brought me to where I am today. When I look back at my life thus far as an African child growing and living in America, an array of emotions come to me, from laughter to tears. The more I journey into the wisdom that we hold from ancient times to modern day, the more empowered and strong I feel in my walk in this life.

I’d like to share some of the wisdom that continues to nourishes me.

“A Man Is Taller Than Every Mountain He Climbs.”

You are greater than any problem that you will face. You hold the potential to meet all that challenges you. It is a matter of trusting yourself and all that you carry within and with you. You are tall because you are greater than this physical body and this personality you’ve created or known. You are tall because you walk on the shoulders of many who have come before you. As Linda Hogan eloquently put it “you are the result of the love of thousands.” My culture teaches me that my ancestors are still alive and routing for me, guiding me in spirit.

There have been moments when wisdom has flown out from my mouth but seemingly not from me. When light bulbs in my mind bring solutions to the problems I’m faced with. When I acted in courage, standing up for others, instantly without a thought or fear of consequences. Warriors, healers, ancient grandmothers, kings, queens and many others walk with each and every one of us. There is infinite wisdom and strength accessible to us at any time, much greater than any mountain we will climb.

“To Get Lost Is To Learn The Way.”

I have been lost at times in my life and unfortunately I can’t blame the GPS for all of it. I admit that I have felt bad for being lost because modern day life often makes it seem like we should have it all figured out or together. However it is through being very lost that I was open enough to gain and receive purpose, healing, and wisdom. If I had tried to fill the lost moments and wholes with just any ‘ol thing I could find, I would of missed out on many lessons and a whole lot of meaningful experiences that allowed me to walk strong and purposefully today.

Those that have dedicated their lives to following the wisdom within have appeared lost at times. They’re nomads, their non-conformists, at times they are 20-somethings, or Shepard boys enchanted by lost treasures. Being lost allows you to travel the unpaved road, its challenges you, and forces you to face your fears and deeply look at all that you are honestly. It’s okay to be lost, in fact it’s been my way to a meaningful life aligned with my highest self. I live free when I accept where I am now while not having it all figured out.

“I Am Because You Are.”

What would a post about African proverbs be without honouring community! “I am because you are” is my interpretation of the South African philosophy of ubuntu, which Desmond Tutu explains “Ubuntu speaks particularly about the fact that you can’t exist as a human being in isolation. It speaks about our interconnectedness. You can’t be human all by yourself.”

It can be very easy for us to disconnect, separate, and dishonour our undeniable connection to one another when we make judgments about each other’s actions and/or choose to not understand one another. We say that we just can’t understand how someone could do whatever it is we’ve deemed bad, we don’t allow ourselves to relate, we deny that parts of ourselves that are fully capable of committing the same or very similar acts, but most importantly we can’t understand where they are and thus can’t see from what place they can heal or are healing.

Ubuntu is humbling. Ubuntu brings us back to earth, back to humanity, and allows us to know and express compassion.

“I am living from a place of gratitude for being able to walk tall, supported, lost and humble as I journey deeper and live my life more authentically and creatively. I am slowly but surely living unafraid to be who I am and welcome all that life has for me as I co-create.”

Recommended Articles by Gogo Thule Ngane

About the Author

Gogo Thule Ngane is a Sangoma Traditional Healer, Priestess, and Medicine Woman. She is guided by the Amadlozi, Elevated Ancestors of her lineage. Her work includes divination, traditional healing, and leads workshops, ceremonies, and retreats on ancient African healing and spirituality. She is devoted to awakening ancestral wisdom on the earth.

3 Morning Rituals To Empower And Enrich The Soul

I have to admit that I have mastered the art of staying in bed as long as humanly possible before suddenly jumping up, and rushing through the day to make it to my job or appointments. At least half of the time this appears to work. I get up, I go, and I get it done. However, by the end of the day I feel depleted, soul-less, purposeless, and completely tapped out. I know I am doing myself a great disservice.

Aside from the normal routines of bathing, eating well, and remembering your keys before you leave home, I invite you to join me in committing to at least one soulful ritual in the morning.

A lot of times we tend to try to make a lot of changes and implement all of our goals all at once. We put too much pressure on ourselves to change. Real lasting change is gradual, integrated consciously, and repeated often. You have to give yourself room to see what is no longer working, find ways to let those things go, and then make room for new and empowering practices — all the while being gentle and compassionate towards yourself.

Below you will find three rituals you can do every morning that will help you feel more centered and full of purpose in the midst of your hectic life.

Ritual #1: Practicing Stillness

I know that everywhere you turn, the wellness community is encouraging you to meditate. Well, that’s because it’s important. Yes, meditate, be still, and get quiet. Just 10 minutes a day will transform your life. (Don’t believe me? Learn more about the benefits of meditation here. The studies on this are piling up.)

At the end of the day, when we feel tired or drained, the sting really kicks in and we question what all this work and running around is for. We come home accomplishing what seems like a lot, putting all this energy into other people’s goals and wellbeing, but feel unappreciated. I have come home from work many times, looked around, and wondered, “Well, who is going to put the same level of energy into me?!”

The truth is that you can’t control anybody else, and you certainly can’t expect more from others than you are willing to give of yourself. If you can’t give yourself 10 minutes in the morning, why should anybody else?

So take that time. Pour into you. Meditate. Take deep breaths in through your nose and exhale out through your mouth. Deep, cleansing breaths connect you with your innermost yourself, nourish your spirit, and fill you up with energy before you begin giving to others for the day.

Ritual #2: Purposeful Journaling

I have just recently come to love the ritual or practice of journaling. I know that many of us feel more and more called to search for purpose and meaning in our lives as we get older. At times “purpose” feels like a huge idea, a concept too big and abstract to grasp onto in our day to day lives.

A powerful way to bring more purpose and clarity into your life is to write out your reflections with the following prompt inspired from the text A Course in Miracles. Ask your source the following questions (whether that be God, the Universe, or the angels and ancestors): Who would you have me be? What would you have me do? How would you have me serve?

Prompting yourself in this way daily will begin to open you up to the little pathways where you can have a positive impact in your own life, as well as the lives of others. This will challenge you to find and weave purpose, meaning, and value into your life—all of which nourishes the soul by encouraging you to become more of who you truly are every day.

Ritual #3: Moving Mindfully

Before you get out of bed, take a minute to feel into your body. Pay attention to the areas that are sore or uncomfortable due to possibly sleeping in the wrong position or even areas you just haven’t been honouring. Consciously stretch and move your body in the areas that want or need attention. This is important because as we breeze through our day and focus deeply on tasks and work, we impose large blocks of time where the sensations and signals in our body are being ignored.

The body is one of the greatest sources of information for our well-being. We can feel imbalances in our bodies long before announcements from our doctors and healthcare practitioners. A lot of us have lost this sense of being in touch and in tune with our bodies, because the signals and inner wisdom are drowned out by work, responsibilities, TV, social media, and the many other things that distract us.

Take a few minutes to see what part needs a stretch, gentle massage, and/or affirmations of self-love and appreciation. After all, your body is the temple that houses your beautiful soul.

Hopefully, these small rituals will help you feel more connected to yourself.

“You deserve you, just as much as the rest of the world does.”

A little soulful change in the mornings can empower you for the whole day. Commit often and journey soulfully.

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About the Author

Gogo Thule Ngane is a Sangoma Traditional Healer, Priestess, and Medicine Woman. She is guided by the Amadlozi, Elevated Ancestors of her lineage. Her work includes divination, traditional healing, and leads workshops, ceremonies, and retreats on ancient African healing and spirituality. She is devoted to awakening ancestral wisdom on the earth.