Are Women Less Tolerant of the Bullshit That Comes With "Success"?

In April 2011, the Wall Street Journal convened nearly 200 top leaders in government, business, and academia as a task force for their “Women in the Economy” initiative. (You can learn more about the initiative and the conference here.) The conference was called to address the growing evidence that while women make up more than half the workforce in the nation, the progress of women in America’s workplace has stalled—and it’s now actually “falling backward”.

Ladies, does your "traditional" job give you a headache? You're not alone. Put down the pills and read on!

My colleague Christine Jacobs rightly pointed out in her April 15 Forbes.com post: “Who would have thought that in the year 2011, there would still only be 15 women CEOs in the Fortune 500? Who would have thought that only 15% of American corporate board positions would be held by women? Who would have thought that only 17% of the US Congress would be women? And we are frustrated.”

I’ve heard many reasons for this phenomenon, from all angles—women aren’t as driven as men, we aren’t cut out for business, we just can’t handle the pressure as we near the top of the ladder, etc. And there are all kinds of data sharing that our ambition peters out as we add to our family. A February 2011 McKinsey & Co. survey shares as our families grow, women, unlike men, show less interest in advancement and believe their chances of promotion fade. Women express a greater desire than men to maintain what they consider a healthy balance between work and life outside their job.

Yes, that’s it.

Did you catch that?

Women simply don’t want to sell our soul to all the B.S. that comes with fitting into the traditional business model. (Key word there being traditional.)

I don’t see this shift as a bad thing, or a sad thing, or some huge problem that needs to be addressed. I see it as a celebration that women are standing up for what we want. We simply want to choose where, when, and how we want to work. And the traditional, male-designed workplaces don’t offer this option. That’s why women are running away in droves from climbing the corporate ladder.

At the conference, Harvard economics professor Claudia Goldin confirmed that today our barriers aren’t what they used to be. Instead they are “the intersection between what women would LIKE and what they’re being offered by occupations, firms, corporations, sectors, institutions….”

She went on to share one interesting example regarding M.D.s: 36% of all female pediatricians of all ages choose to work part time. “That is how they have a profession they are proud of, that’s fulfilling, that is their identity, and they can also mesh with this thing called life,” she explained.

And this “choosing better” phenomenon is not limited to the United States. At the conference, Wei Sun Christianson, chief executive of Morgan Stanley China, shared there is also a glass ceiling in China. “You see very few women on the top,” she said. “However there’s one interesting phenomenon. With the government encouraging the development of the private sector, you see private business and family business thriving. That’s already one-third of the Chinese economy, and 21% of these entrepreneurs are women.”

It makes sense, doesn’t it? Long and hard hours, dreaded commutes, and being cut off from our families for the majority of our day just isn’t how we thrive best. And if we do want to work really hard and make bank, why not work for ourselves… the way we want to?

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Amen Ali! Your statement that women are not willing to sell their souls to all the B.S. is spot on in my opinion. I had an epiphany moment after getting my fill of the bull one afternoon after a dreadful meeting. I stopped for coffee, sat in the sun, and started the plan in motion to change my life. I have never looked back. Thank you for this article. I am going to follow you.

Ali, this article is great, thank you for writing it! It goes to show that you need to look at all the numbers to get a good understanding of the whole picture.

Did you know women-owned businesses account for 40% of all privately held businesses?

At the Center for Women’s Business Research, we strive to give women the valuable information like you provided today. But it takes the support from women business owners to help inform women business owners.

Our W-Biz Insight survey is now open and we are seeking participation from women business owners to take this quick 4 minute survey.

If you are a women business owner, represent! Take the W-Biz survey here: http://bit.ly/jA1aO7

And Ali, thank you for your ongoing support for women business owners!

Really well written piece, Ali, I couldn’t agree more. It has always been my biggest belief that it is possible to have it all- the job, the family, the social life- without compromising the most important part, happiness. “Choosing better” is a great way to term it because it isn’t about sacrifice or suffering through a terrible position and following the traditional rules anymore. It’s about making the conscious effort, the choice, to ensure that through your own success, you refuse to settle for anything less than what you’re worth.

I’ve found that the women I know that are driven to be completely in the corporate world do it for a short time or they are pre/post children. I have seen so many colleagues of mine leave high paying corporate jobs only to return as a P/T consultant or contractor.

Lifestyle should be important. What’s the point of being a wealthy country with access to everything we need, if you cannot enjoy what you have with your family?

This has also been my experience. Women committed to creating the lives they want AND the success they want at the same time. If that means creating a new game on a different playing field – so be it!

I was taught (decades ago) that I needed to follow the rules. However, I was also told that if I couldn’t follow the rules, it was my responsibility to see to it that they changed. So, that’s what I did – I made up new rules. And a new game.

I believe that is what we are doing now. I salute the rule breakers and the game changers!

If you look at the Entertainment Industry as a microcosm of the “business world” it is on par with this article. Many more men at the top. We’ve had a few female studio heads, and if you read their biographies, you’ll see that they made a lot of sacrifices in their personal life to get there, sacrifices they weren’t necessarily happy to make, nor did they feel were necessary to make, but men insisted they do it because “that’s the way it is done.”

I can’t tell you how many women I’ve worked with in the entertainment industry who’ve sacrificed getting married, having a family, and being with the family and friends they have out of fear of “missing an opportunity” or “falling out of the loop.”

You’ve shown women there IS a different way. This way translates to the entertainment industry. With you as my mentor, I aim to follow in your footsteps of showing women how they can take control of their career, and be successful while still having a life that fulfills them.

So happy to have found all of you like-minded women here! This is the “struggle” I had while working my corporate job, and then I found my calling through my health and wellness business. I, too, believe we can have it all! And I get to show other women they can also!

Through it all, I have designed the life of my dreams … may all the women “out there” who don’t know they get to design their dream lives be blessed with knowing that yes they can!

Super post! I left a traditional job as a corporate attorney back in 2000 and have never looked back. I did it because I knew I wanted to have more control over my personal and professional lives. I was starting a family. I was getting married. I had been successful as an attorney, but didn’t want to trade my soul for a corner office and a leased BMW. Today, I am happier and more successful than I ever could have been working for someone else. I chart my own course, create my own opportunities, and collaborate with amazing entrepreneurs all over the world.

The joy of my life is teaching other women how to create this kind of freedom for themselves. It’s empowering and gratifying and I wouldn’t trade it for the best corner office in the world!