Things That Will Make 2012 Feel Like 2011

From the world’s most popular micro blogging site Twitter it seems has taken the mantle of being the world’s largest obituary page. The web page inundated with “R.I.P.s” is bound to make you hyperaware and dizzy about someone’s passing.

All New iDevices will be pooh poohed yet they will sell zillions….

The minute Apple announces iPad3, Itv or iPhone 4SMSG there will be a massive hue and cry about the price/technical glitches/ bland designing/closed ecosystem and there will be widespread reports of Apple hitting a post Jobs slump. Yet a week after its release Tim Cook will be seen leaving for work in an Airbus weaved from $100 notes.

Thy Phone will be passé-

No matter which category of cell you purchase, it won’t survive the year as the hottest item in the class. A handset is like a world’s longest vacation romance. First there is immense joy and thrill and intense smugness inevitably followed by a lull when you see there is someone better. Then you’ll be stuck what will seem like eons, with an outdated piece of junk , weighing down your pockets with lackluster specks and shame.

Something will claim to be a game changer ….

And invariably it won’t be. Game changers has become a nonsensical , loosely bandied around catchphrase assigned to products that are similar to something that already exists albeit, with a wider screen or a faster processor or greater emphasis on cloud computing

Apple and Android Fans will still hate each other…..

How nice it would be if we could simply enjoy our own magic boxes and tacitly acknowledge the virtues of others. But when you swear your fealty to one particular tribe or legion then the other tribe must be construed as evil and bashed incessantly on online comment sections….

A Facebook change will cause distress….

It may be a minor change but there will be public outrage as if Zuckerberg has personally replaced the Facebook logo with him having a poo. There will be cries to bring back the old Facebook. However , if asked nobody will be able to draw how the old Facebook looked like

Call Of Duty will come out at the fag end of the year and smash all records

Been there done that umpteen number of times. It will be released near Christmas and will decimate all records of every kind. It will be the largest selling game of all time , the biggest cultural thing to have graced God’s green earth, will have the highest number of wooden chairs and yet will be uncannily similar to the last four editions in terms of gameplay.

Cameras will take pictures –

There has not been any ground breaking improvement in photo- tech in the last few decades -and no shooting in 3D does not mean a big leap forward. So one can safely assume that this year’s batch will be exactly like last year’s but on an average, with one more megapixel and one more multiple zoom. And they all will be available in black, silver and another colour.

The economy will go for a tailspin after showing definite signs of “green shoots of recovery”.

Blame the Feds , blame the administration or the snooty rich guys prancing around in their suits in Wall Street –blame whoever you want – something inexplicable will definitely happen to the economy and it’ll be déjà vu all over again….