The sandbags were piled high and deep around Scott Walker, the goggle-eyed homunculus hired by Koch Industries to manage their midwest subsidiary formerly known as the state of Wisconsin. And, on Thursday, his masters got everything they'd paid for, and more. There now is only one Republican presidential candidate under active criminal investigation — Chris Christie. Rick Perry, of course, remains under indictment.

Writing for the majority, Justice Michael Gableman found a key section
of Wisconsin's campaign finance law is "unconstitutionally overbroad and
vague" and that the activities prosecutors had investigated were not
illegal. "To be clear, this conclusion ends the John Doe investigation
because the special prosecutor's legal theory is unsupported in either reason
or law," Gableman wrote. "Consequently, the investigation is closed.
Consistent with our decision and the order entered by Reserve Judge (Gregory)
Peterson, we order that the special prosecutor and the district attorneys
involved in this investigation must cease all activities related to the
investigation, return all property seized in the investigation from any
individual or organization, and permanently destroy all copies of information
and other materials obtained through the investigation.

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So, not only does this decision pull Walker's cojones out of the fire, it also demolishes whatever was left of Wisconsin's campaign-finance regulations. This is particularly piquant in this case when one notes that Wisconsin also operates under the Second Worst Idea in American Politics — The Elected Judiciary.

In February, the special prosecutor asked that one or more justices drop out of the case,
presumably because they have benefitted from spending by the Wisconsin Club for
Growth and Wisconsin Manufacturers & Commerce. The Wisconsin Club for
Growth is estimated to have spent $400,000 for Ziegler in 2007; $507,000 for
Gableman in 2008; $520,000 for Prosser in 2011; and $350,000 for Roggensack in
2013. WMC spent an estimated $2.2 million for Ziegler; $1.8 million for
Gableman; $1.1 million for Prosser; and $500,000 for Roggensack. In addition,
Citizens for a Strong America — a group funded entirely by the Wisconsin Club
for Growth — spent an estimated $985,000 to help Prosser. The spending
estimates come from the Wisconsin Democracy Campaign, which tracks political
spending. The justices did not give a reason for why they don't view that
spending as a conflict, but court rules say political spending on its own is
not enough to force a justice off a case.

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If you're keeping score at home, the same organizations that were the subject of the criminal probe gave hundreds of thousands of neatly laundered dollars to the judges who ruled that those same organizations did nothing wrong on behalf of Scott Walker because fk you, that's why. If this happened in Myanmar or Kazakhstan, we'd all be laughing at it. Instead, let's once again congratulate Justice Anthony Kennedy for his immortal observation that: "...independent expenditures do not lead to, or create the appearance of, quid pro quo corruption."

So Walker's winning streak goes on, even though it is identical in its authenticity to those winning streaks once put up by the Harlem Globetrotters over the Washington Generals, or Hulk Hogan over the rest of professional wrestling. His presidential campaign is going to have to crater on its own which, if Walker keeps stepping on his own dick, may well be inevitable. The other day, he opined that keeping gay people from becoming Scoutmasters in the Boy Scouts kept children "safe." There was the predictable outrage, and Walker responded with the lamest walk-back since Jeb (!) tried to get out from under his contention that we're all not working hard enough.

A spokesperson for Walker's campaign, said in a statement on Tuesday
evening: "The previous policy protected Scouts from the rancorous political
debate over policy issues and culture wars. Scouts should not be used as a
political football on issues that can often be heated and divisive." And during
a press conference in South Carolina today, the New York Times reports that
Walker himself attempted to clarify his remarks, saying the ban protected
children "from being involved in the very thing you're talking about right now,
the political and media discussion about it, instead of just focusing on what
Scouts is about, which is about camping and citizenship and things of that
nature."

Outside of four justices on the Wisconsin Supreme Court, it's hard to imagine anyone dumb or bought enough to buy that nonsense.