4.20.2013

Kid smarts

I went to pick up my daughter today. She was having cake with her mother and sister. It's her seventh birthday today and it's all she can talk about.
I was glued to NPR on the radio today. They had live coverage of the capture from one of the neighbors of the property where that kid was hiding in the garage and boat.
I got my hugs and kisses and helped her pack up all she wanted to bring; a new dress she wants to wear to her birthday party, her coat, her boots ("Yes you need to bring boots hunny, it's really snowy and it's gonna be cold and wet."), and some dolls. We loaded into the car and took off for home, still listening to the radio.
We talked for a bit about her day at school and how excited she is to go swimming. After about half an hour she asked, "What are they talking about? Why do the police want to get this guy?" I replied curiously, "He might be one of the bad guys that made those bombs that hurt and killed those people, baby." She just looked at me, vacant eyed, "I don't know what you're talking about, Daddy."
I know that her mother and I have differing parenting styles, and that's fine, but it floored me that she hasn't heard about this on TV, from friends, or saddest of all at school.
Some people in her life want to protect her from hearing anything about the disgusting parts of our world and some want to protect her from just select issues or happenings. I personally want her to know and understand how dark and scary things can get sometimes. This will prepare her to cope and not fear in that moment when things get dark and scary.
"Why would somebody want to hurt those people, Daddy?"
"There are bad people out there hunny, and they do bad things sometimes. It's sad, but that's why we need to be careful and safe."
"What if a bad guy comes in the house, and has a gun, and wants to take our stuff, and he says... (long little kid rant that doesn't really go anywhere, you just gotta wait while they get through it.)"
"What ifs don't really matter hunny. If things get scary or bad, you need to listen to me, do what I say, and you'll be fine."
"Why?"
"Because listening to me will keep you safe. Because a daddy's first job is to keep you safe and teach you to be good."
"Why would those guys be so bad? What made them so mean?"
"It doesn't matter what made them that way or why they are that way, baby. What matters is that we are good and do our best to be good and do good things for everyone."
"Like how you are good and keep me safe? Like if we are good then it makes their bad go away?"
"Yes hunny, just like that. If we are good and enough people try hard enough to be good and do good things, the bad things don't matter. Because there is more good than bad and we win."
"OK Daddy. I think we're gonna win."
I don't tell this story to show you my parenting or show what kinda dad I am. I couldn't give two shits what you think of me. Just gotta say, I think this kid's getting it. Things are turning up aces.