…next to a dumpster of a now abandoned school building behind our place.

From what I can tell, the album documents a 1995 school trip for a class of Chicago high school students who visited a farm and campground in Wisconsin.

Most of the photos are boring (a lot of kids standing around trying to look too cool for school), but a handful of them are amazing. I’ve decided to post these gems one at a time and caption them along the way.

Here’s the first one:

“Don’t take my picture, Brad!” slurred Denise, who was joyously drunk on a near-lethal mix of Jolt Cola, Cool Ranch Doritos, and Bubble Tape. But as she coyly turned away from him, Denise softly whispered to herself, “Take my picture, Bradley. Take it, process it, print it… and then fall in love with me forever.”

…but that didn’t stop teachers from giving me some sweet awards over the years.

First, I got this Certificate of Citizenship (whatever that means) from Principal Josie B. Gray and my fourth grade teacher Mrs. Koury of Lowell Elementary in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. This certificate was for “continuous effort” and “development of responsibility,” which you’ll notice are underlined. You may also notice that “good behavior” and “practice of courtesy” are crossed out. Yeah… sounds about right.

I hit that milestone on June 10th, 1986 at only nine years old. BOOM, Y’ALL!

And on April 23rd, 1990, at the obnoxious age of 13, I got this Certificate of Award (pretty sure that’s not even proper English) for “Acting a Fool in Music Class” from Principal I.M. Nutty of Reform School. Or, more accurately, Mr. Ellington, my chorus teacher at Jackie Robinson Middle School.

…for these amazing gifts that included stripper glasses (both male and female), a “Bitch, please. I’m from Chi-Town” coffee mug, a framed Wisconsin puzzle piece, some 4×5 and 120 film (more on that later), and two onesies for Grey.

In fact, she wore the “Chicago Style” one home from the hospital yesterday.