Halfway through 2018: My year so far.

I say this every month, I know, but I cannot actually believe how quickly this year has gone. It feels like only yesterday I found myself crunching through the snow in my massive, marshmallow-esque puffa coat, and now it’s July, we’re in the middle of a heatwave and I’m sneakily trying to angle the office fan towards me instead of my colleague in a bid to get more air. I thought I’d write a little update post, a reflective look shall we say, at what has happened in the past six months, because my life is, in some ways, completely different to what it has been for many years.

2017 for me was the “year of change”. I finally started a full-time job in an industry that I have aspired to work in for many years. I moved back to Cardiff, got myself a little flat that I adore, and made so many friends and memories along the way. I scooted up and down the country with work, I got myself a promotion in the process, and I feel like I’m finally trundling along on my career path and I loved every minute. I graduated with a Distinction in my MA, I was nominated for a Journalism Award, and I felt like I was embracing all things adult.

Additionally though, I feel like I lost myself a little bit towards the end of last year. I started reverting to old habits, where I’d be going out constantly and, while I was extremely focused career-wise, I wasn’t focusing on myself outside of work. My general health deteriorated, I wasn’t blogging or being creative, and even my strict work out regime slacked a little. I feel like it resulted from what I can only describe as a lack of commitment in my relationship, and it left me feeling pretty lonely in the process. However, I vowed that 2018 would be different. I wanted to focus on myself, my health (both physical and mental), and I generally wanted to feel like me again. I definitely feel like I have achieved that, although things have changed pretty drastically.

Without beating around the bush, I am now a single lady for the first time in six years. It was a decision that was not made lightly and I won’t discuss it on here as I want to be respectful, but it’s been really strange getting used to being on my own after being with someone, who I loved very much, since I was just 18. It’s crazy because in those six years I’ve grown from a teenager into an adult. I’ve graduated university, twice, I’ve moved out from home, I’ve worked in London and Cardiff, and have found myself settled in a city that’s different from the town I grew up in. I’ll forever be grateful for those six years, the memories we shared and the things we did and learned together, but sadly things change, and sometimes it turns out that you’re living very separate lives and have very different end goals.

There comes a point where you have to decide whether to stay in a situation that is comfortable, but ultimately isn’t working anymore, or whether you take the leap outside of that comfort zone and embrace all things new and different and ultimately terrifying. Because it was terrifying for me, stepping away from something that was so familiar, especially as I absolutely hate change and all that comes with it. The first few weeks were extremely difficult, but I surrounded myself with good friends, got lots of exciting events planned for the summer, and threw myself into work and my fitness regime. Looking back now, I know that I’ve made the right decision for me and while it was hard, I’m looking forward to embracing the spontaneity that this new chapter of my life brings.

I set myself clear goals for 2018 back in January, to focus on my career, travel more, work on getting myself back in shape by signing up for a half marathon, start seriously looking into buying my own place, and I wanted to focus on myself. And I’ve done just that…

Aside from a few difficult weeks during the springtime, 2018 so far has been pretty amazing. One goal was to travel more, and so far this year I’ve visited Paris, holidayed in Majorca, worked in Cornwall, Nottinghamshire and The Cotswolds, a trip to Canada is on the cards, and I’m also heading away to Center Parcs for Christmas with the family. I think the one thing I’ve learned since my breakup, is that I need to be more spontaneous. I find it really difficult to do anything without a plan in place, but I’m really enjoying branching out and getting more places ticked off my travel bucket list.

I also have really upped it when it comes to my fitness regime. It’s something I lost focus of back in 2017, although working all over the country made things difficult. Back in January I bit the bullet and signed up for the Cardiff Half Marathon, which is taking place in October this year. It has been one of my goals for many years and, despite signing up only being able to run a 5km, I’ve pushed myself and ran my first 10km race back in March, completing the course in under 1 hour. I now aim to run a 10km distance once a week, and it’s amazing how much more focused and determined I am since getting back into fitness properly.

I’ve taken fitness and training a step further too, by signing up to a regime with a Personal Trainer. I never thought to get one if I’m honest, but I’ve absolutely loved the sessions and am finally feeling body confident again after struggling for the last two/three years. I’ve learned so much in the time I’ve been taking the sessions and it’s amazing to finally feel good about myself again.

Another big and extremely exciting change is that my goal of saving for my first home has been accomplished. I’m keeping it on the down low for now as things work their magic behind the scenes, but hopefully I should have some exciting news in the next few weeks!

So, what about the rest of the year? My main focus is to just keep working on myself, to experience more, to continue working hard in my job and in the gym, and to settle in what could be my very first home! It’s all really exciting and I’m looking forward to what the next six months will bring.

It sounds like you are doing amazing and achieved so much this year so far, congratulations on everything!! This is quite a personal question but how did you know things weren't working anymore in your relationship? If that's okay to ask! I am in a comfortable stage of a long term relationship and worry about drifting apart from my partner. So sorry if this is a difficult question, you don't have to answer! 🙂 xxelizabeth ♡ ”Ice Cream” whispers Clara

Thanks very much lovely! 🙂 No of course, I will try to answer as best I can! I think we were getting to a point where it was a bit like a cross roads, I wanted us to move forward and live together etc. but my ex partner didn't want to move away from home, even though his job was moveable and mine wasn't. He wanted me to give up that dream I'd had to move back. He did try moving up to me eventually, but I think by this point I already felt it was coming to an end. I think for me, it was the fact that he didn't want to sacrifice anything for our relationship to move forward, & I guess I could have sacrificed my job etc but I had worked hard for so long to achieve it. That's where I noticed a change! Sorry if that's no help at all. I hope you guys have a wonderful relationship for many, many years 🙂 xx

Thank you so much!! So sorry, I hate to ask personal questions. It sounds like you are doing absolutely amazing by pursuing your dream and doing the right thing by you, that's so inspiring! 😀 I feel like I am completely new to relationships and panic at the idea of the whole 'I love you but I'm not in love with you' idea, especially later on in a relationship when it feels less special than the first days but hard to tell if that's a good thing. Thanks so much for offering me an insight haha! xx

For me, 2017 wasn't necessarily my year. It wasn't my year of change, or action. It was that year of hatred and emotions and things which I prefer to leave behind. 2018,on the other hand, has been my chance to turn life around and realize we only live once. 😀It's great how you have targets set in place for the rest of the year and by what it seems, you're doing extremely well. Keep it up and I wish you well in your goals!Ps: Add me on Snapchat; https://www.snapchat.com/add/bakingboutique 😘😀#sweetreats xx http://www.bakingboutiquebirds.blogspot.co.uk/

I'm sorry to hear 2017 wasn't the best year for you, but I am so glad you're feeling so much better and have made positive changes to ensure your happiness is key. Thanks lovely, I hope this year continues to be great for you too. xx

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Hello and welcome to jessie-ann.co.uk, a lifestyle and travel blog written by Jessie-Ann Lewis. I'm a 25 year old journo, currently working as a TV production researcher in Cardiff. I love to travel, take photos, and blog all about it!