Shortly after midnight last night, eyewitnesses reported a "tired-looking"
Aspect of Death hammering a sign onto the tree near Death's Realm. The
green wooden sign, painted with a strange blue glowing liquid, read
"Death's Realm Is Full: No Vacancy".

The next morning, scavengers stole the sign. This act did not go unnoticed
by the Greater Spirit, who was reportedly seen chasing after the mortal
thieves. "I saw the whole thing," says Koan Argent. "[Death] just hiked
up his black robe and took off after the scavengers. He started screaming:
'<click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click><click>,
There Is No Escape!' That's when his hat fell off."

The sign is still missing, and Loketh Uutog of the Ebon Order reports that
there is a "substantial reward" for its return.

Tick: <two grunts and a squinty gesture that either meant "I
can't read your writing" or "I left my bifocals in my other dinner
jacket">

Militia charging trolls at stone bridge.

Lord Tempus, in an effort to raise revenue, has started charging trolls at
the stone bridge. When asked how attacking trolls would help, he
clarified: "No no no, we're charging -- requiring payment -- of trolls."
Apparently, trolls are valid currency in Galen, but how they're going to be
shipped back is not so clear. "Hopefully Lord Ruprik will just open a gate
and we can stuff 'em through."

Ask Merriam:

Dear Merriam: What's the difference between "Governess" and "Governor"?
And which is the right word to use here?

--Confused in New Galen

Dear Confused:
Well, a "governor" is an administrator, usually a political figure who
oversees lands. A "governess" is completely different: a woman who
oversees the raising of children.

Don't feel bad: given the political leadership of your lands, and the
nature of the settlers in those lands, I can see why there might be some
confusion.

--Merriam Webster

Darklocke and Tomo's Social Column is an OOG production of Mike Magelinski
(Darklocke) and David Leung (Tomo). Dave is very apologetic for brutually
ripping off The Onion (www.theonion.com), but he still had a
lot of fun doing it. :) Credit also to Jessi Jaffe for the No Vacancy
idea.