When England lose this Test match, the score will be 1-1, but you can lose a match in different ways. You can affect opposition players to the extent that they’ll have a different outlook in the next Test and a different outlook will make people play differently.

Take England’s bowling. With only four bowlers and two getting carted, the wheels could have come off, rolled down the hill and exploded, the ash later being worked back into the earth by rain and worms. However, Chris Tremlett stood unavoidably tall and Australia’s batting still feels like it’s pretty much just Mike Hussey as a consequence. England think that. Australia think that too.

Now England’s batting? Well, most of the batsmen opted to wave slightly fatiguely in their second innings, which is never a good tactic. Previously remorseless, after two collapses in two innings, the batting’s now taken on a fairweather hue.

Is 1-1 always the same?

If the opposition’s win seemed to come with joyful ease while your team had to slog and slave to inch over the line, how will you feel if you fall behind in the next match? You’ll feel like you can only compete when you’re at your best and you’ll believe that a slight drop in standards will see you overwhelmed.

Conversely, if you closed in on your victory enduring only the friction of a luge track, you won’t get dispirited by big batting partnerships or the loss of a couple of wickets. You know you don’t need to be flawless, so success seems so much more attainable. This keeps you buoyant and buoyancy keeps you determined. Without determination, you’re basically relying on blind luck.

Yes, v much agreed. We need Prior and Bell to at least keep the ship afloat for a few hours tomorrow, if only to reduce the schadenfreude somewhat. Bugger and balls, though. Can’t believe two capitulations in one match. ahem, our rabbits have a nasty dose of Mitchellmatosis. Other fatalism and shite puns here:

I knew it would be a waste of time starting to feel optimistic about this series. Glad I didn’t. Typical bad old England was bound to reappear some time. When the chips are down they’re still a useless bunch of pathetic spineless chumps. Delighted I haven’t been staying up to listen to TMS to follow this pathetic excuse for a batting lineup.

Bell really is wasted down at 6. Even if they don’t jettison Collingwood for Morgan next time out he has to move up at least one spot so he can actually have some influence on what happens.

There were a few loose shots and the Aussies started to bowl like a cricket team and not a group of badgers on a ride at Thorpe Park (whatever that means) but we are actually still better than them.

It was back to the wall stuff for Australia and still only Hussey looks like he knows which end a bat works. Yes their bowling was better than before, yes they bothered catching and throwing the ball in the field but the position we are in is more down to England’s inability to kill them off than the Aussie’s ability.

Meh. It’s 1989, 1990-1, 1993, 1994-5, 1997, 1998-9, 2001, 2002-3, 2006-7 all over again. Mostly 1997, I guess, with the false early optimism of a good win (looking back at the scorecards from that series though, that really was atrocious batting done properly…).

I know how this goes. I’m much more comfortable this way, believe me. At least I know the words. I don’t much go in for this fancy modern winning rubbish. Following English cricket is meant to be soul-crushingly disappointing. At least it’s familiar to me – get up, check the score, feel depressed, let it ruin the whole day, start to feel optimistic when you go to bed, wash, rinse and repeat.