Maybe Generousity Isn’t Enough

by admin on October 10, 2011

Background : My brother just celebrated his 50th birthday with a big party on a boat on the New Jersey Shore. It was a fun time but two of his and his wife’s oldest friends ( Bob and Jill) could not go because of a disability. The next day the four met up at one of Atlantic City’s casinos where my brother loves to go and is extremely lucky. He gets comps on rooms, meals and shows constantly and is very generous in sharing. I have spent many a week-end in the casino for only the $5.00 in taxes. End background.

So Bob and Jill decide they want ice cream at one of the casino’s shops. My brother wanted coffee so he gave them comps for free ice cream and went to another store. My SIL decided to get some ice cream and went up to Jill and gave her $4.00 . Jill took the money and got my SIL the ice cream. However, the free coupons covered the entire cost so Jill stole $4.00 from my SIL.

My brother and SIL did not realize this until much later and were gob smacked ( thanks British E-hellers) to say the least. This couple has been over their house for more holiday meals that they could count and were considered close friends. 0713-11

Maybe this was an oversight, a mistake they made. Could it be possible that Bob conducted the sales transaction after Jill gave him the money so that Jill was unaware that SIL’s $4.00 was unneeded?

Maryann, if the person had physically taken the money out of SIL’s purse that would be stealing. This is more of an oversight. Why didn’t SIL just ask for her money back? Also what is a couple of dollars or pounds between firends?

$4? These people are prepared to throw away a friendship over $4? Okay I admit to being cheap, and it bugs me when people keep my money when they shouldn’t. But I wouldn’t throw a friendship out the window over what is clearly an accident.

When I’ve had friends accidentally forget to give me back my change, I just make an offhand comment asking how much change there was and they say ‘Oh yeah! I almost forgot. Here you go’ and that’s that. It’s not that I enjoy being a miser or anything, I’m a student and therefore am on a very tight budget. That $4 your brother lost out on could get me to class and back, so yeah it could be a big amount to me. But I wouldn’t hold a grudge for an oversight.

If it was a constant thing by these people then yeah I’d be annoyed. But everyone is entitled to a once-off. A real and truly generous friend would not be complaining behind his friend’s back about how they ‘stole’ $4 from him.