Thursday, January 26, 2012

2x11. Again

The first time Blogger eats a post, it's a huge one. With cut and paste from two separate blogs. Links. Photos. Maps. Graphs. Spreadsheets. A movie. Grrrr. So I'm starting over, and you might not see some of that stuff. Unless this glass of white wine inspires me more than I think it will.

Both SUAR and Xenia tagged me with the recent 11 thing. Since I get an amazing number of readers from SUAR's blog (Hi guys, feel free to comment and say hello!), and Xenia once sent me a Popener just because, I figured I had to respond.

Da Rulz.

1. Post these rules
2. You must post 11 random things about yourself
3. Answer the questions set for you in their post
4. Create 11 new questions for the people you tag to answer
5. Go to their blog and tell them you’ve tagged them
6. No stuff in the tagging section about you are tagged if you are reading this. You legitimately have to tag 11 people!

I'm picking the 11 people by whoever is at the top of my blogroll when I finished this, unless it's one of the above, or someone that has already got their 11 things up on their blog. Unless I think they would enjoy being tagged again.

11 Random things about me. The really great one about my dissolute youth where I won a game of 10 pin bowling, lost my virginity, and did not get into a drinking contest, all on the same night, is gone. And I had it worded so carefully. Sorry guys, maybe another time. Blame Blogger.

I have now lived in this house longer than every other house put together. Without even trying I can remember living in 11 other homes (how's that for a coincidence!) Talk about putting down roots. The book collection is right out of hand. There are times I think we'll never move again, just because of the books. And the wine too, of course.

I've lived in two countries, and in 4 Canadian Provinces. I have not yet visited PEI or Newfoundland. Or any of the Territories.

One of the sounds that most reassures me is to hear airplanes flying overhead. Jets are ok, but it really should be a prop, and especially an old radial engine. It makes my day in the summer if I hear an old radial engined airplane flying overhead.

My go to comfort food is a peanut butter and honey sandwich. Organic crunchy peanut butter. (The Co-op gold brand is really good.) Unpasteurized honey that has crystalized. Fresh whole wheat bread. I got the taste for honey that way because my maternal grandfather kept bees. When visiting we had home baked bread, milk fresh from the cows, the honey, and lots of garden fresh veggies. I didn't know how good it was.

There are 4882 songs in my iTunes collection. The most recent that I know of off hand was recorded in 2011. The oldest was first played in the early 1200's. There may be some even earlier, that just happened to be the first CD I found.

The thing I most want to shout out at people is "Walk faster!"

I like to make lists of things to do. Often I don't get to all of them. Some things have been on my to do list for years.

There are rules about facial hair for men. A beard shall be full, lightly trimmed for neatness and hygiene, complete with mustache. A mustache alone is fine, neatly trimmed, and not sculpted into weird shapes. Anything that isn't one of those two things is out. Especially out are: goatees, soul patches, the thin thing outlining a jawline that isn't there, mutton chops, handlebar mustache, just scruff underneath a jawline and clean shaven above, and anything that involves spending more than 1 minute a day maintaining. Women, I admit, the grow in period is pretty tough, but there are creams for soothing inner thigh rash. And then, after a while, considering always neatness and hygiene, delightful things can happen for you.

Cats, polar bears, and sharks are special. There are not enough of these, and too many humans these days. One day soon I want to travel and visit the polar bears and sharks. Preferably not the same day.

Shaping molten glass with only some wet newspapers and basic tools is fun. There are some wines the exact colour of molten glass as it cools.

I have often thought that current sporting events are pretty boring. What follows are some suggestions for livening them up:

Golf. Tee boxes should be moved closer to the greens, and point both ways, so a course can be played forwards or backwards. A tournament starts with a foursome on each tee box, some going forward, some backwards. They start at the same time and play on through. Final score is number of strokes times number of minutes to complete 18 holes. Extra points for passing another foursome. Only protective gear on the head allowed. It would be permissible to have one me member of the foursome to have unlimited shots as a way of assisting his or her team mates to play through the opposing teams, but they can have only as many balls as they can carry or scrounge.

Triathlon, providing the polar bears agree to cooperate. The bears enter the water 30 minutes after the last swimmer (Ironman distance). They can eat what they catch, but aren't allowed to cut corners. I wonder if cheetahs could be trained to chase down bike riders?

Baseball. A bunch of weenies. The game should be outdoors. Once started, a game shouldn't be stopped for any reason at all, up to and including tornados. There should be a pitch clock rule, obliging the pitcher to throw the ball within a certain number of seconds after the catcher tosses it back to them. Say 5 seconds. There should be a rule about possession of the ball and bodily contact.

Basketball. Make the height of the basket variable for every game, ranging between 12 feet and 15 feet, say.

Hockey. Get in a fight, you're gone for a season's worth of games. Double that for nasty stick work. Forfeiting your salary, of course. And really, since it's a team sport, each player ought to be paid a certain base salary. From there a portion of their additional salary is based on skill at playing or negotiation. But at least half the salary should come based on the number of points the team gets. Win the game, and your team gets full salary. Tie, and you get half salary. Lose, and you don't get that portion of your salary at all. That ought to take care of players calling it in during the season. Plus, only the top 8 teams go on to the playoffs.

Swimming. Enough of the endless discussion about swimsuits and how much they contribute to records. Everybody swims nude.

Speed skating, cross country skiing. I'm sure there is a way to work polar bears in there somehow, but haven't figured out the details.

Ski jumping. Much as I dislike subjective judging criteria, I think ski jumpers should be given extra points for flapping their arms as they jump.

What’s one habit you need to break? I am helpless in the grip of cookie lust. I really should do something about that, but it's easier to ride or run for hours to make up for it.

What’s your favorite book of all time? Damn you SUAR! This is brutal. I've read tens of thousands of books, and I have to only pick one??!! Have a heart. Dancing Aztecs by Donald Westlake. It's probably the funniest book I've ever read. Honourable mentions to Memory by Lois McMaster Bujold, anything with John Dortmunder in it (hint, Westlake again), most of the Regency romances by Georgette Heyer (surprised you, didn't I?), early Larry Niven. As a bonus, the writers I would most like to write like are Isaaic Asimov, and E. B. White.

Have you ever cheated on a test or a partner (don’t need to tell me which one)? No. Been tempted though.

If you weren’t doing your current job, what would be your profession? Giver of Advice.

Do you think Bob Harper is gay? I don't know who Bob Harper is. I know of a Stephen Harper, although I'm pretty sure he is not gay. He's being a big dick lately. Does that count?

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? The night Linda agreed to put up with me for the long term. We were in bed when I proposed.

Would you be able to run further or faster? I can't conceive of needing to run further than 42.2 Km, unless something with big teeth and slow paws is chasing me. I can hardly run slower, now, can I, so I anticipate being able to run faster.

What food gives you gas? Beans are about it. My guts are pretty well behaved.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given? It's only money, and it's easily replaceable. Time with family and friends, irreplaceable. Time spent doing what you think is fun, irreplaceable.

What was your ultimate dipshit moment (so far)? There's been a few times I've gone over the line at work in terms of providing feedback. Sometimes my mouth and parts of my brain get me in trouble.

Marry, f*ck or kill: choose either group – (a) Val Kilmer (current, not young version), Kevin Federline and Russell Brand; (b) Lindsay Lohan, Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton. No brainer. Kill them all. The world will be a better place. Kill those standing next them too, while you're at it.

Which country would you most likely be arrested in and/or shot at and why? Any Islamic country. I have no respect for a religion that treats women like they are not even human. I don't have much respect for religion in general, as I think it is an atavistic holdover from an ignorant and barbaric past.

Which person (alive or dead) would you most want to bitchslap? Stephen Harper. He's fucking up a country I love.

Which special talent or skill do you wish you had? Invisible bitchslapping. There are lots of people on my list after Harper.

Who or what would you consider to be your archenemy? Fate.

Pop or soda? Ick. Don't drink either. Tried flat coke at the second last aid station at GWN, and nearly threw up right there.

What’s your favorite holiday? Plaid day.

How would you prefer the apocalypse to go down? Swiftly, if it must at all.

Last, my questions for the tagged.

What moment of your life, if captured on video, would go viral?

What do you most want to shout out at people?

How old were you when you lost your virginity?

Related to #3, did you respect yourself the morning after?

What is your comfort food?

If you couldn't live in your current country, where would you live? (Assume they would let you in.)

What book do you most want to see made into a movie, and who plays the lead roles? Alternatively, what book should never be made into movie?

What movie should never, ever be remade? Yes, I know it's too late for the Italian Job.

Is there anything conceivably better than hot, willing, twin red-heads, with whipped cream and chocolate?

What is one thing that "they say" is bad for you, that you will not give up?

Would/do you clean your house before the cleaning services comes over? WHY?

Thanks for playing along, Keith. I confused you with question #9 though--I meant what do you call it (pop or soda), not do you like it. I'm not sure if it's similar in Canada, but carbonated beverages are commonly referred to by one or the other term depending on which region you're in in America. Actually, I've heard in the south they call all of it Coke. Typically in New England they call it soda while in the center of America they call it pop.

I've been tagged by several people, so I'm not forwarding the tag, just answering in comments. And the basketball hoop should only be 4 feet off the ground, so being 7 feet tall is a disadvantage and you look stupid if you dunk.

1) Countless number, but the first that comes to mind is when I dislocated my hip during a race and put it back and continued the race (with several volunteers worriedly walking with me).2) "Stop shouting!" (usually to people on cell phones)3) I'll let you know.4) I never have respect for myself, just to fit in with the crowd.5) I claim I'll marry the woman who'll make me potato pancakes from scratch.6) I'd do okay in the Netherlands, Denmark or Canada.7) "Everybody Poops" starring SUAR.8) "Freaks" (1932, Tod Browning). Fascinating, but offensive now.9) Yes. Each of those taken individually.10) Running when injured.11) I'd have to clean the house to be able to get to the phone to call for cleaning service.

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The suggestion/rant about the WTC and it's "Access Club" and overfilled events is here. I still don't understand what's so hard about managing a wait list.

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"The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out; the brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. The brick walls are there to stop the people who don't want it badly enough. They are there to stop the other people!" -- Randy Pausch

My question: Is pain a brick wall? You can discuss in the comments section of that blog posting.

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About Me

I'm hooked pretty good on this triathlon stuff. I'm now about 3/4 the man I used to be, size wise, and there's still some flab around the middle to work on. Even though I'm still really slow, I don't care. I enjoy getting out and doing the training, and I'm really enjoying getting to know this body. After all these years, I'm pleasantly surprised at what it will do.