HARTMAN: Do any of you people know who Charles Whitman was? None of you dumbasses knows? Private Cowboy?

COWBOY: Sir, he was that guy who shot all those people from that tower in Austin, Texas, sir!

HARTMAN: That's affirmative. Charles Whitman killed twelve people from a twenty-eight-storey observation tower at the University of Texas from distances up to four hundred yards. Anybody know who Lee Harvey Oswald was? Private Snowball?

SNOWBALL: Sir, he shot Kennedy, sir!

HARTMAN: That's right, and do you know how far away he was?

SNOWBALL: Sir, it was pretty far! From that book suppository building, sir!

HARTMAN: All right, knock it off! Two hundred and fifty feet! He was two hundred and fifty feet away and shooting at a moving target. Oswald got off three rounds with an old Italian bolt action rifle in only six seconds and scored two hits, including a head shot! Do any of you people know where these individuals learned to shoot? Private Joker?

JOKER: Sir, in the Marines, sir!

HARTMAN: In the Marines! Outstanding! Those individuals showed what one motivated marine and his rifle can do! And before you ladies leave my island, you will be able to do the same thing!

Coco LaFemme:Does it matter that subby got the # of years wrong? It was still a senseless and brutal act, perpetrated by a deranged nutball for no good reason. If you don't like the President, you vote him out. You don't kill him. That's not how the system is supposed to work. It's offensive.

Everything I've read about Oswald suggests it was in no way related to policy. He had this incredible egotism and desire to be famous, and lo and behold, here comes this huge crime of opportunity when he learns the President's motorcade route will be passing right in front of the building where he happens to be working at the time. It really doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.

Also, for those who haven't read it, Stephen King's book "11/23/63" is actually his best effort in years and worth the read. Your basic time travel / try to save JFK / what would happen type novel.

Coco LaFemme:Does it matter that subby got the # of years wrong? It was still a senseless and brutal act, perpetrated by a deranged nutball for no good reason. If you don't like the President, you vote him out. You don't kill him. That's not how the system is supposed to work. It's offensive.

Oh come on. Let the farkers have a bit of fun. They have fun with everything else. Ain't nobody here happy that somebody shot JFK, but humor is part of how folks deal with tragedy.

first i will prefix this statement with "i am not a conspiracy nut" but.years ago while in Dallas we were downtown and walked over to Dealy plaza.paid ten bucks for the tour in the old depository.the window he shot from was blocked off but you could look out the window next to it.when you look out that window and try to imagine being Oswald for that brief moment you are struck with the the thought that there is no good reason to fire when he did as the car and his target were traveling away at a bad angle. 10 seconds earlier it would have made for a head on shot much closer and the car would be barely moving because of the turn.

so i'm left with the thought of perhaps someone walking by or his gun jamming or he was coordinating with some else.

Coco LaFemme:Does it matter that subby got the # of years wrong? It was still a senseless and brutal act, perpetrated by a deranged nutball for no good reason. If you don't like the President, you vote him out. You don't kill him. That's not how the system is supposed to work. It's offensive.

seriously, we should greenlight this headline every day until the cia apologizes.