All posts tagged Indian Standard Time

It was second Saturday of January 2011, the day I was supposed to go and visit D’s step mom-P as suggested by D’s dad. I was not really looking forward for meeting D. As I said in one of my previous blogs, at this time I was still a wreck and recovering from the back stabbing from my X. I was still waiting for the jerk to return from India. I had to drag myself out of the bed and get ready to go, only out of respect to D’s dad. (I don’t know if I said this before, but D’s dad is almost old enough to be my grandpa). So, the Indian principle of “respect elders” is the reason I obliged him. P wanted me to be at her place at least 1 hour before “D” shows up so we could have P and R time, (we loved spending time with each other and playing dominoes). Even from the beginning, P loved me very much. I told her I was worried what will happen to our relationship if the thing with D does not work out. (more…)

As I said in my previous post, our relationship started during some of the most painful times of my life. I was desperately praying, asking God to give me strength to get through this very tough time in my life. I did not want to do anything stupid because what’s the point. I had a history of harming myself at times of stress, but this time I wanted it to be different. I cannot cause my family more pain. There were times I wanted to kill myself. The minute I got any bad thoughts, I told myself that I was tied to a chair and cannot move. This was a way to stop myself from going into the kitchen for knife. (more…)