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Author
Topic: Dating thread: Part XXI- March right in and kick some ass (Read 36768 times)

Wendy, I am clueless on such things. I'll probably ask my brother's gf, who worked on the Geek Squad, to just come over and show me. I bought the computer, damn it, I want to use it!

Queen, sweet of you to say about me being your inspiration. Now don't think that too much; I'm known for falling off my cloud at times. I'm sure you'll do fine. You're a strong woman, and can handle yourself well.

Well, I talked to my bff tonight and now I'm a little excited about going to Indy this weekend. I think it might be the ticket. Nothing else to really report. Life goes on, and on we go........

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Damn it, Betty. If I say you are my inspiration then that's what you are. I could care less about you falling off your cloud, I will just push your ass back up on it. Now go back to your cloud and be my inspiration this minute... I'm glad you are looking forward to your trip and can't wait to hear about it when you get back...

Betty, don't be fooled! Queen is just trying to butter you up with one hand while she's doing Timitation with the other (and who knows what to poor Sharkie)

Now what gives you that impression? *EG*. I don't need my hands for Thunter Bunny, all he has to do is bend over and spread 'em... Ooooh, did I say that? As for Sharkie, I'm all for him working out my kinks...

My son had stopped over for a late night visit. He asks me had I heard from Kevin and then my cell rings, it's Kevin. He wanted to answer my phone but I just ignored the call. If he had anything to say why in the hell would he wait til after 1 in the morning to call me? It really doesn't matter because there is nothing he could say that would make me want to date him again. And if it was anything I needed to know, he could've left a message. I think he was just calling to see if I am still pissed or if I was going to answer my phone. Now that I think about it, I did leave a cd in his car but I don't even want it back. I can make another one.

I forgot to mention that I got the latest gas bill. As usual, it doesn't seem like I am making any type of progress in getting it down. Last month, a program covered the so called budget plan. But even with that and the latest usage, the bill looks to be over a grand now. This is nuts. When it gets warmer, I am so out of this place.

Nothing scheduled for tomorrow so I guess I will pull a late nighter and try to sleep in. Everytime I say that something happens and I am up early.

Edited to add: Kevin just called back again and it is after 2 am, WTF? This time he decided to leave a message saying some shit I couldn't understand and then to say he doesn't like what I am accusing him of. What? And of course, he mentioned the cd which he says he plans on returning. I think he's going to try to show up today and give some weak ass explanation. I am not trying to hear it.

I haven't a clue as to why I'm up at such an ungodly hour. I was up until after midnight last night. I'm sure I'll nap sometime today.

Queen, what does Kevin mean, he's not liking what you're accusing him of? Is someone you've talked about it to talking to him? I just don't know what else he could be talking about. Didn't you say you talked it over with a couple people there? Hmmmm...........

I feel pretty blurry right now. I might even go back to sleep before the morning's over. I don't know what to attribute it to. Since being on the Kaletra, my sugar's been pretty fucked up, which is a common occurence with that med. I only ate one time yesterday (1/2 cup of soup, 1/2 sandwich) and my sugar ran around 329. And that was four hours after eating! Next week I go for my first set of labs being on the Kaletra, so will see if it's making any difference.

Check back in a little later. Have a good one ladies-

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Queen, I thought you'd jump in by now. Where are you girl? You've got me a little concerned.

I'm just waiting for my therapist. He should be here any minute. Other than that, I have my final 'ethics' class tonight. So, no homework for the weekend! And it couldn't have been timed better so I won't have to worry about that when I'm in Indy. I hope this day goes by as fast as possible and tomorrow gets here. My bff and I will be leaving tomorrow about 1:00. Don't want to rush it, running around frantically in the morning. Also want to beat rush-hour traffic, especially in the little towns between here and Indy. Indy is a couple- 2 1/2 hours away from here, so the timing should be perfect. For the first time in months, I'm actually looking forward to something. I'm going to indulge in the 24 hour meetings, maybe meeting some new people, hearing some good speakers etc. They usually have formal dinners at these conventions, but I've never gone to one. The tickets are usually around $50, people get all dressed up etc. Not really my scene at an NA convetion. Now don't get me wrong, I can dress up, attend formal events etc. Just not my thing right now. They always have a dance also. Doubt I'll be going to that either. With my knees, I'd probably fall down and re-injure them. I did used to be quite the dancer, though. Could always boogie to the 'Electric Slide,' doing Charlie-Brown, walking it up etc. I know, I know that's old news. I'm in awe of the dances the people do now.

OK ladies, I'm waiting!

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Thank all for the warm welcome,i really need this place. I have to respond to this dating thing.I am 50 (3-15-58), will be in a few weeks.I really want to tell you I have had a big life change! I'n not stressed any more about work or kids, I dont work anymore and I retired from being a foster parent. After years of taking care of others being in an abusive marriage,being divorced for 5 years, and being braninwashed that my life was over,no body wants to date me, and that i was gonna burn in hell if I had sex out of marriage (lol) ,I have finally come into my own.Turning 50 is great! because I am enjoying my life again !And i don't care what anyone thinks! not my family or the church! I am partyin a little and drinking apple martinis . i dont have a relationship yet , but I am dating, and its not that bad ladies, i have had 3 dates( movies dinner the works) with two men,one poz and the other not.The one who is not poz I really like. I also have disclosed my status to him one after some heavy petting lol and he took it well, so I thought,bu tthe next day he exspress he was paronoid, that he could get the virus from saliva, so I calmly told he no, chances were nill but to talk to a doctor if he felt like.By then I thought this relationship is doomed! I told him we didn't have to talk or see each other again,if he felt uncomfortable, but he is still going strong. He said he like me a lot, a wants to continue dating, Ladies i have a date with him tonite, dinner and movie. I don't plan to even kiss him on the cheek ! so lets see what happens!! The 2nd guy who Is poz is very nice also ,but we don't have a lot in common,I am a party animal and he is a couch potatoe! I have a dear friend who just turned 50 and met another lady friend who is 53, these ladies are professional women whom are not poz, and they have embrassed me with love and support, we do lot of things togehter , like shop , eat out and go to the beach and party, so I am happy to have my 2 buddies in my life,no matter what.

Hi Betty-Geez! You were up real early! Did you get to take a nap? I think I am going to go take one myself before I have to pick up the kids. I was reading the posts earlier but I had to leave real quick to go pick something up and then I went grocery shopping, they were having a buy 1 get 2 sale, got to love the sales. I hope you were able to eat more today and I hope your sugar is doing better.My sons doc called today and I have to take him in the morning to find out the results of his lab work. I hate having to wait for that stuff, it is so nerve wracking. Then hopefully I can make it to the first support group for 10:30 and then go volunteer for that lady I help out.Your weekend sounds like it is going to be great and I hope you have a wonderful time. Have a safe trip !Snow

Netta, That is great. I am glad things have turned around for you. I have been around the abusive relationship block and it is a hard nut to crack. Silly rabbits just don't have a clue how strong a women can be . I have never had a apple martini but they sound yummy. I hope you have a great time on your date tomorrow, the guy seems pretty cool and I am glad your disclosure went well.Have fun and take care,Snow

Alright, here I am. I got up close to 1. Actually Queen Nefertiti had gotten me up around 8 am so I had deposited her little ass in the kitty jail. She is in heat and the boy cats are at her. She doesn't meow loud but she does what we call the booty dance and the boy cats are on her. After putting her in the cage, I passed back out.

As I said Kevin started calling me at 1 am and when I got up there was a message from him as late as 3 am. I am so glad I turned my phone off. Now he is trying to apologize after leaving the first message saying he doesn't appreciate what I am accusing him off. What am I accusing him of? Just wanting some ass and not even trying to get to know me. Now his messages are saying how much he misses me. Yeah, whatever. Betty, the only person I have talked to about the situation are my roomie and my bff who set me up with him. He hasn't talked to either of them. He has blown his chance and I am just turned off. I don't want to be bothered anymore. But I am finding out he is lying about things too. He tried to tell me that I am the only one he has been intimate with but found out from my bff that the woman he was seeing before me, he had gotten pregnant. She had an abortion but he doesn't know that I know any of this. That tells me he is a liar. And to be lying this early on is just messed up and makes me feel that he can't be trusted. Not to worry, I am fine and not affected by any of this mess. I am just so glad that I didn't have sex with him for numerous reasons now and not just the disclosure issue.

Betty--- I am glad you are looking forward to your trip and don't have to worry about doing school work when you get back. You can enjoy yourself. Have some fun, girl.

Netta-- Good to hear from you and glad things are going so well for you. Dating 2 men, huh. I am catching hell just trying to find one. I hear 50 is the new 40...

Nothing else going on with me. I think I am going to go into a gaming coma. I will check back later....

I thought maybe I was going to be a loner today. So glad everyone's chimed in.

Netta, go girl! I haven't dated in a long time. The last relationship I was in, well, the guy pushed me down a flight of stairs. So, that ended. My first husband was an extremely abusive alcoholic. He died 3 days after I tested +. My second husband I met in N.A. (Narcotics Anonymous) and he went back to mainlining and wiped out my bank account. I haven't had a very good picker with men. I do get some occasionally.(very occasionally). I am a self-proclaimed lesbian, but that's just mainly when it comes to relationships. I had a LTR with a woman and it was good. I just listened to my 2nd ex and that ruined that. We just pick ourselves up and dust off..... Good luck on your date tonight. Now when you feel more comfortable here, you know we'll want some details. I have a couple very close friends. It's always good to have.

Snow, good luck on getting your son's lab results. What are these for?

Queen, are you sure it's the cat who's in heat? (referring to Sharkie and Timmy). I'm glad you're not dealing with Kevin anymore. You deserve way better than that.

Well, nothing to report. I'm going to school in a couple hours. If I wasn't diabetic and in recovery, I would definitely celebrate with a few drinks. Oh well, I can dream.

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Just wanted to say hi. My date with the negative man went well last night. I really liked him alot. He brought me flowers. He remembered me telling him that I like tulips so that is what he brought me. I was floored in a good way. He has asked me out but not sure when that is going to happen. I am just going to try and take my time, but there is some stress on my level about the disclosure part. I kept my self awake last night thinking of how to tell him if it gets to that point. Which I am still not sure of what to say or how to bring it up. I guess I will know when the time is right. He said some very key things to me last night about relationships and we think a lot along those same lines. I just keep thinking positively (no pun intended) that when I do tell him he will be ok with it. I am just struggling with the fact on how to tell him so it does not seem like a big deal. I would love any suggestions from you girls on how I might or should bring this up and what should I say.

Netta- Glad to see you are enjoying life. I love apple martini's and have been drinking espresso martini's you should give those a try.

Queen- Kevin has his head up his has, I can't wait to hear what his excuse his and what he thinks you are accusing him off. It sounds like its an excuse to me so you will talk to him.

OK well back to work I go, decided the coast was clear without to many coworkers around where I could write now. I will check back in later.

Queen - Men think we are crazy. Im like Madea. I can ask you a question in April and come back in November and ask you the same question to see if I get the same answer. (LOL) My per peeve is a man that lies. It seems as if they are trying to get over on you

Sun- Its great that your dat went well

I myself dont have to worry with the dating issues right yet. I am with my b/f who is positive also. We are think about getting married lat spring, early fall

I still have not made it to my gaming coma yet. I been busy downloading smiley's. Thanks to Winiroo and Iggy. I have to try to find one for every occassion. You ain't never lied, Betty, I think I am in a bit of heat, I am just not doing the booty dance like Queen Nefertiti over here. I was going so strong in Sharkie's thread, I thought I was going to bust a nut...*LOL* I am going to miss you while you are gone but have noticed Sharkie is doing a disappearing act too. Now what is really going on? And he talking about brushing up his oral technique, uh huh..

I am still waiting to see a therapist but hopefully can find one somewhere other than the people I was trying to get with. It depends on my insurance and hoping to find one closer to my house so if I have to walk, I can just pop the cd player on my ears and roll out. I think I have been just a bit too inactive, my thighs are killing me like I have been doing bench presses. I can't wait for it to get a bit warmer so I can do some walking.

Yes, this grading session is over! Thank heaven, the Great Spirit, whoever.

Queen, I know what you mean about being in heat. I'm gonna have to find some, maybe in Indy this weekend. I will miss you also, but will certainly fill you in on the details. The convention is being held in a Marriot, so trying to find a place won't be a problem. *slaps self* Hey, don't give up on trying to get a therapist. I had a really good talk with mine today. Having a good therapist has helped me many times. Oh, about Sharkie. I know he said he had to work today. Maybe we're giving him too much dirty talk. You know, some people can be all talk. I guess we'll see......

Keepingfaith, congratulations on the bf situation. If you get married, you're going to have to post pictures. What a happy occasion that would be!

Nothing really going on. I packed earlier, except for makeup etc. So I'm all set to go. Of course, I'll check in tomorrow morning. Now, when I'm gone, you ladies behave yourselves.

I'd like to learn how to post those images that you're doing Queen. Maybe sometime over the weekend or something, you could pm me and tell me how to do it. I think they're way cool. OK, have a good one ladies........

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Keepingfaith- I second the congrats on getting married. I am happy for you!

Betty- WOW! Your convention came at a great time, now you can really enjoy yourself. If anyone need to behave, I think it might be you My son had labwork done because over vacation he kept throwing up and complaining of back pain and he had a that blood in his urine b4 vacation so I think they just wanted to make sure. I wish they could have told me over the phone, I hate waiting for this kind of stuff.Sun- Glad to hear your date went well. Unfortunately, I don't have any disclosure help for you, I am trying to figure that out myself these days, the best thing is to follow your gut...I guess.Queen- Glad you are over Kevin. Your son sounds like a great kid/young man. My son said something to me in the car on the way home today. He goes " Mom, I see people checking you out and giving you looks" and I am thinking he is talking about at his school because kids in the past have commented on him being black and my being white. He's like no, like checking you up and down and looking at your butt- He goes and, I don't like it, it was just so cute how he said it. My little protector, already.Hope everyone has a good night!I am hoping to be able to get some sleep tonight.Night, Snow

I am finally done with my gaming coma and thought I would check in before I go to bed. I have to dog sit tomorrow. This ought to be entertaining, the other cats are use to Boo but Queen Nefertiti hasn't laid eyes on him yet. But then the other cats are bigger than the dog too so maybe that is why they don't really pay him any attention.

Kevin called a few more times but I just ignored him. You would think he would get the hint. Nothing planned for tomorrow, just the same shit. Hopefully, I will get a call back from Sue who is the Supervisor of the Case Managers at my ASO. After telling my clinic nurse, Leah how frustrated I was with my current case manager, she passed it on to Sue. But her reason for talking to Sue was hoping she could find me a therapist since the place I was trying to get with has not returned my calls. I am hoping I can get a therapist at the hospital which is close by my house so I can walk and not have to worry about transportation. I'll keep you posted on those developments.

Keepingfaith- Congrats on the upcoming wedding. I love happy endings or should I say beginnings?

Betty- If you do get some booty, let out a few screams for me... Now what images are you talking about? When you get back we can talk more in detail and I'll show you whatever it is you're talking about.

Hasn't it been a few days since we heard from Cindy? I hope she is alright. I thought she said she is not feeling too good but also not going to be with Ice this weekend. And about posting more since she is going to be alone, hmm, maybe she is just waiting.

Well, I am going to check out the other threads. I see there is only 3 other people online other than me, members that is. I guess that is a sign to take my ass to bed....Night to one and all...

Snow, that's cute what your son said. My daughter was like that also, and still is a bit. She always used to be my character judge when it came to guys/women. Actually she got along quite well with Shelly (the woman I had the relationship with). She's always telling me "ma, find a lady. You do better with them." Our kids just want to see us happy and being treated right. About your son's lab work, I remember you talking about the physical stuff going on with your son. Well, please let us know what you find out.

Queen, oh, if I get laid, I'll let out some screams for all of us. I hope you get a therapist at that hospital you're talking about. It'd be convenient, so you wouldn't have to worry about getting a ride. I read in another thread where you used to keep a journal, but because of trust issues don't anymore. I agree with what Philly told you about doing one on your laptop. I believe it's an excellent form of therapy. Please keep us updated. Oh, those images I was talking about are those emoticons.

Yes, it's very unusual that Cindy hasn't posted on here. She did say she was feeling sick. Maybe she'll post this weekend.

Ok ladies, I'm off to check out a few more threads, then get my ass ready. Have a good one, and behave! I don't want to have to kick some ass when I get back!

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Keepingfaith--- I think that is a cute name for the puppy. My kitties names are Lucifer Damien and Nefertiti Cleopatra, it fits them, one being a demon and the other a queen.

Betty--- Do you have a digicam? Would love to see some pics but the most important thing is to have fun.

I do hope Cindy is doing alright. As I mentioned before, I am now dog sitting Boo, the cats don't seem to mind except for Nefertiti who is giving looks of WTF? Boo loves the cats but growled at Lucifer for being on his blanket. And Lucifer looked at him as if to say, "You can have your stinky dog blanket, I sleep on beds!"...It was funny, maybe I'll sneak a picture of Boo and post it later. At the moment, my roomie is entertaining Boo.

We're suppose to get hit with another 1-3 inches of snow but then Monday it is suppose to be in the 50's with rain. This is some crazy weather we're having. I haven't heard back from Sue yet. Nothing else planned so I guess I'll go into another gaming coma. Chat later.....

Yes this weather is bonkers...but im not going to complain about any warm weather thats for sure...Hey, i got asked permission to use some of my comments from my DWI thread, in the magazine...KEEEEWWWLLL...(thats how my son says it in the most screeching tone you can think of)..I dunno where he comes up with some of faces and noises...lol..i cant do photo bucket from here but im gonna post some pics of my babies soon...

HI LADIES, OKAY, I NEGLECTED TO MENTION, I WAS VISITING MY BEST FRIEND IN VIRGINIA BEACH, FOR HE 50TH BDAY PARTY, THATS WHY IVE BEEN HAVING FUN, I AM GOING HOME NEXT WEEK TO MY LONELY APARTMENT IN GEORGIA, SEE I HAVEN'T DATED IN YEARS, NOR LESS A VACATION, BOTH MEN I MET HERE IN VA. MY BEST FRIEND WANTS ME TO MOVE HERE, I DON'T KNOW IF I COULD LEAVE MY GRAND BABIES AND DAUGHTER. I LIVE ALONE BUT THEY HAVE BEEN MY LIFE. OF COURSE I NEED TO GET A LIFE! MY DATE LAST NITE WAS FINE, ONLY HAD A CHANCE TO GO TO DINNER,BECAUSE HE HAD A REPORT DO FOR WORK.THIS GUY IS NOT POZ . I RELLY LIKE HIM A LOTAND HE LIKES ME,WE HAVE CHEMISTRY,HE TURNS ME ON. OF COURSE I PACKED MY EMERGENCY KIT JUST IN CASE- CONDOMS , KY AND A LITTLE WARMING JELLY LOL. KY IS FOR MY DRIED OUT VJAY JAY, SINCE HYSTERECTOMY LOL. WELL WE HAD ITALIAN AND HE CONFESSED HE IS GOING THROUGH A ROUGH DIVORCE,AND THATS WHY HE WAS STRESSED AND OVER REACTED OVER THE SALIVA SITUATION THE LAST DATE. HE ASSURED ME AFTER HIS DIVORCE IN APRIL HE WANTE TO "START OVER"( WHATEVER THAT MEANS) FROM THE BEGINING WITH ME. HE SAID HE WOULD BE HAPPY IF I MOVED HERE, THANKED ME FOR THE GOOD TIMES,( DANCING AND DATING).OK SO WHY DO I FEEL STRANGE??? LIKE IT WOULD NEVER WORK CAUSE HE IS NEGETIVE AND MIGHT NOT WANT TO USE CONDOMS ALL THE TIME,? ETC ETC? IVE JUST STARTED DATING SO I WILL BE TAKING THINGS SLOW AND CONTINUE TO DATE POZ MEN ALSO. I HAVE MET A LOT OF THEM ONLINE, I FEEL LIKE A KID IN A CANDY STORE!1OF COURSE U MUST BE CAREFUL AND WEED OUT THE NUTS!SUNSEEKER;I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE, I GOT DRUNK THE NIGHT I TOLD MY FRIEND I WAS POZ, BUT I WORRIED FROM THE THE MOMENT I MET HIM.!!!!BETTY: IVE BEEN WITH WOMEN TOO AND THOUGHT ABOUT PLENTY OF TIMES!QWEEN: YOU ARE A TRIP, 50 IS THE NEW 40!! LUV YA, YOU MAKE ME LAUGH!!KEEPING FAITH:CONGRADULATIONSHELLO AGAIN TO EVERYONE!

Welcome to Netta and Latrice. Glad you ladies joined the party. Great bunch of people here. Hope Betty is having the best time and getting her Groove on. I could use some of that. Not much going on here. I got my hair cut, modified page but it looks better since all the split ends are gone. I might get a curling iron for the ends. Just wanted to check in. Later Cristy

Hi everyone!Hope everyone is doing well! I am stuck in the house with kids, we are having snowfall here, we got probably 5 to 6 already I am going to find a craft to do to keep everyone occupied. My older sons Pinewood Derby got cancelled so we don't have to go anywhere. He just got a Chris Brown CD and everyone is dancing so at least I have some entertainment, I'm sure they will get tired soon. I made it to my first support group yesterday, it seems to be a great bunch of people and I look forward to going back again.Queen- I have a full house too. I have 2 pits and 2 ankle biters, right now. Thankfully, everyone gets along good. My Mom will be here tomorrow to get her dog, the female pit. A cat adopted us when we first moved here. He had a such sweet disposition and was great with the kids but he passed the winter before last. If it was up to me we wouldn't have any dogs, my plate is full already. My SO brought them all home and that's about all he has done Glad you have Sue advocating for you now, that should help.

Viv- Good Luck wading through all that paperwork, you must feel good when you get it all done.

Netta- I would be careful about picking up and moving, I know it must be nice to find someone you are interested in but seeing you just met him, see how you guys can handle a long distance relationship first. You don't want to leave the love and support of your daughter and grandbabies for someone who doesn't deserve you. LOL..weeding out the nuts is putting it nicely unfortunately the one and only thing they want is a NUT.

cjc- I sported a page for a long time, I love that cut. Doesn't it feel great to get your haircut.

Moon- Sorry to hear you will be without Iceman this weekend but I'm glad to hear that you alive

keeping- That is a cute name, what kind is she? Don't forget to hide your shoes

Yep, the house has been full for sure. Those who knows us know we love our cats, if we had a whole house, we'd end up having more. We have talked about it before. The cats are like our babies. We consider Boo as a frequent visitor or he shall be. His owner goes out of town a lot and Boo seems to take to only me and my roomie. Other people he snaps at. He should be leaving in about an hour. But I have noticed most of the cats have stayed out of my room except for Lucifer. But Lucifer has known Boo longer than the other cats. I am ready for a nap though, taking Boo out for potty breaks has interrupted my sleeping schedule.

Other than pay a few bills, I guess I will be lazy most of the day. Go back into a gaming mode and just chill. I cooked dinner last night so it will be left overs. I hope Betty is enjoying her trip. Cindy, I know you're missing Ice but we are missing you so I can't wait for you to update us. Netta, not sure how long you have known this guy but I agree with Snow and you should see how things go before planning a move. There are a lot of things to consider besides just the guy, ya know. I could tell you some horror stories about moving and a guy doing a complete 360 once I was in his town.

I'm going to peep the other threads and try to catch me a nap. I'll check in later.

Nothing to really update here, made it through the end of the month chaos at work beautifully. I had some labs done and the doc wants to treat me like a lab rat bec of "low iron." I am going to exercise my right to say "no" and just start taking Fe supplements in the meantime.

Low iron could very well be the reason for my fatigue and dizziness that I have been experiencing over the past 5+ years or so....but it could be the Sustiva, it could be the bad neck......

Just breezing through for a moment. I just got done taking a nice hot steamy bath. I think I stayed in there til my skin almost shriveled up. I had my cd player on listening to some Prince. Yeah, Winiroo, Boo is a dog, I forgot to post a pic of him. Next time he comes over I will. After Boo left, I went back to sleep for a few more hours. Once I got motivated, we decided to just chilll and veg out today. We had pizza, ordered some beer and watched a few hours of NCIS since USA had a marathon of it today. I called my bff and talked to her for a few then I turned my phone off. It shall remain off for the rest of the night. Kevin called again today. I think I am going to have to get my number changed. It's going to be a pain because I am going to have to give out the number again.

Nothing special going on. Going to pull an all nighter going into gamer mode. I'll talk to you guys later...

Yes, it's early and I've been up for a while. I managed to get 3 decent night's sleep in row which is what I usually get in a month. But, looks like those days are over yet again. I'm exhausted and may try to get back to bed for a few (minutes). I've not been posting here, or anywhere really, for a while. Going through some crap that seems to be over now. Either that, or I've gotten so used to it that it's not bothering me as much.

We should see some sun today and I think that'll help some, too. I'm tired of seeing gray skies and white ground. Couple that with no sleep, restless kids, a perpetuating something that's been holding on since October, and a mid-life crisis, and that's me. Not the prettiest of sights.

Morning Mum-I'm right there with you with getting 3 nights of good sleep, somethings always seems to happen. I hope that you are feeling better. Yes, it does says "fried dick". I'm thinking it is supposed to be fried duck, just a misspelling that made me laugh especially since it was on a business.I wish I could go back to bed now, the dogs were antsy to go outside this morning, it is supposed to be in the 40's today and even the 50's tomorrow, that will feel like summer . I stayed up late making some chili for my Dad to take home today and I have to run to the grocery store this morning to get stuff to bring lunch with us today. Win- I know you are loving the weather down there, 71, I would be in shorts. How's the baby and Amber doing? Is this Billys first grandchild? My Dad is so goofy with my kids I am very Thankful for him, he was one of the positive male role models they have.

Snow~ You said I could only "get stuck" so much. Well, I'm diabetic as well and don't mind the 10 vials they draw every 3 mos for labs, but......My doc wants to do an upper and lower GI to check for internal bleeding, some kind of gastric thing which he thinks may be the reason for my low iron.

This certainly gives "stuck" a whole new meaning.

I would have to be put under anesthesia, or maybe not fully under in case they need to ask me anything during the procedure?!?!?!? Is that while the scope is down my throat or up my *** ! See where I'm going with this?

I have never been put under anesthesia, its very complicated being diabetic and fasting, let alone being under while my sugars may be going nuts from not eating. The sugars have been all over the place my entire life, so I avoid anesthesia like the plague.

Did I mention that my doc didn't ask ONE THING about my diet? He just thinks I am "bleeding somewhere" internally. This is very tough as this doc has never let me down (he has been my primary for 10 years). I am going to take the iron pills and eat my spinach salads, see what happens with my labs in April. The doc also wants me to return to the neuro doc I saw last May for my dizziness. That doc didn't find anything after 4 MRIs, an xray of my C-spine and a partridge in a pear tree. My PMP also wants me to go to a GI doctor to find this mysterious "bleeding." My monthly cycles are light, so its not that. If I was bleeding internally anywhere from my esophagus to my ass, the proof would be in the pudding, and I am FINE. PMP also wants me to wear a 24-hour heart monitor for the dizziness as well. Oh and he also wants a "sample" from me, as in like when you take your dog to the vet.

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Leave me alone and stop looking for something to be wrong just bec I am poz! My PMP even admitted he didn't know much about HIV.

I did some research last night on WebMD and other women with fibromyalgia feel like they are going to faint sometimes. One had a doc who said her neck muscles were so tight that it was cutting off the oxygen supply to her brain, hence the passing out. Remember last January at my data entry job when I almost passed out, had low blood pressure and all? My neck muscles were incredibly fatigued.

My new insurance kicks in this week and I am going to go see my chiropractor, whom I haven't seen since last June. I have been getting the neck massages every week, though, since June. I may need to have a longer session.

Damn if I'm getting an anal probe without putting up a fight. I have enough "shit" to worry about, tyvm.

(OK, done venting....)

Any of you have probs with low iron or anemia? Is it a side effect of Sustiva/Truvada (Atripla)? ANYONE who has any feedback, it would be greatly appreciated, but I think its the injured neck, and the low iron is just low iron. They say you're more prone to it if you have thyroid probs and drink lots of caffeinated drinks. That's me!

On a happier note, today is 4 months for Iceman and I! (first date was 11/2/07)

Last night was a good night and has carried over into today. I have still left my cell off. I just don't want to be bothered, I have days like those, not about being depressed or anything. I call who I need to and everyone else can just catch me tomorrow. I am going to be running like crazy anyway. I have to go see my primary which I think is a waste since I am not sick. But since he has not seen me since September, I complied without any argument. Later on, I have to go get my depo shot which I was suppose to had gotten done last month. In between those appointments I have to pay some more bills and meet up with my son. It's going to be hectic maybe that's why I just took the weekend to myself.

I have always been anemic. Neither one of my doctors have done any probing, they usually just prescribe some iron pills and send me on my way. Do you get any iron in your diet? Ugh, my last draw my potassium was very low. If you get them to prescribe you the red iron pills, I suggest having some stool softner on hand because the pills can make you constipated. I don't take the iron pills anymore and must be doing something right in my diet because for the first time, I am not anemic or iron isn't dangerously low. But this potassium thing is new to me, my ID doc prescirbed some pills that I have to take with food. I have been taking them off and on along with eating some bananas. That reminds me, I need to get blood drawn for that, something else to do tomorrow. Cindy, why does your doc assume you are bleeding somewhere? I don't get that.

Snow--- Fried dick just doesn't sound too appealing to me....But I thought the sign was funny as hell..You can't order beer? Where you at again?

Mum--- I can't wait for my freaks, uh friends to come back... I miss them and it has been quiet without them around...

Just wondering...Has anyone heard from Dragonette lately? You know I get paranoid when one of us drops off. I am still missing Ms. NY too. I hope they both are doing ok. I have been in a Warcraft frenzy so I am going back to it. I'll check in later...

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Leave me alone and stop looking for something to be wrong just bec I am poz!

Any of you have probs with low iron or anemia? Is it a side effect of Sustiva/Truvada (Atripla)? ANYONE who has any feedback, it would be greatly appreciated, but I think its the injured neck, and the low iron is just low iron. They say you're more prone to it if you have thyroid probs and drink lots of caffeinated drinks. That's me!

Sounds like your doctors been talking to mine LOL I swear mine doesn't know shit and is guessing or googling or using webmd to diagnose me or something.

I've done the down the throat bit. Wide awake and scary as hell. They didn't inform me I wouldn't be able to breathe during the procedure. It only lasted less than a minute but when you are being choked unexpectedly it freaks you out big time. They gave me an appointment for the gastro clinic in July. Supposedly they are going to do an ultrasound. I'm sure it will take till next year to get it done LOL I wouldn't let them poke around in my ass unless the poop test came back showing blood.

I've always been anemic or borderline anemic. I cant take AZT or anything with AZT in it because it makes me severely anemic. I cant stand those iron pills Queen was talking about. They sit too hard on my stomach.

New docs generally will ask me about my thyroid and whether I have had problems with it because apparently big eyes is a sign of hyperthyroidism. But thats not a problem for me. And I live on caffiene.

Alright you bad bitches, I'm back. I think I went through a little 'forums withdrawal' when in Indy.

I had a wonderful time and I'm in a very serene place right now. There was 3, 248 years & 15 days worth of clean time at the convetion. (They add up all the clean time of everyone who's there). The dude who was the main speaker got clean on Feb. 14, 1960. So he has, yes, 40 years clean. He talked about when he first got clean, how he was sleeping underneath people's houses, etc. in New York (the Bronx). The police picked him up and took him to the hospital. They had to de-louse him, he was covered with body lice from being on the streets. He talked about how when he didn't have anything to get high with how he would drain hair tonic through moldey bread, and drink the alcohol that formed. And now he runs a recovery house with 40 years clean.

I went to a workshop entitled "Illness in Recovery." One of the speakers was a man who tested HIV+ in 1983, before they even had AZT. (Not from the needle, he's gay). He had a cerebral hemorrhage and had to learn how to do everything again (talk, walk, piss etc.). His kidneys shut down and he had to give himself dialysis. His windpipe is partially paralyzed, so he has to be careful when he swallows anything (alright ladies, don't go there, even though I'm sure he's done his share of swallowing). He's been clean for 13 years. The other lady who spoke at the workshop got clean in 2000. She has a terminal brain tumor which has caused her to lose her eyesight twice. She also has lupus and has had 43 inches of one of her intestines removed. She's had 18 surgeries, and is going to have #19 next month, when they will have to give her a colostomy. The message? You just go on and do what you gotta do.

The lady I heard today had been arrested 66 times in her addiction and now runs the women's ward of the jail she was in when she was using (drugs). The message there, no matter what, homeless, no money etc.-one never has to use drugs again-ever. And ladies, I haven't felt so serene in a long time. Nothing like 700+ addicts forming a circle, having their arms around each other and just supporting each other. Addicts of all types-black, white, hispanic, gay, straight, bikers, etc. We all just held onto each other. And nothing like seeing a guy with 10 days clean who's desperately clinging, willing to do anything not to go back to active addiction. So another addict paid the guy's way for the whole convetion i.e. the cost of a hotel room, registration for the convention etc. That's just the way these people are-they'll do anything for the still-suffering addict.

Then they had a kareoke thing. No, I did not get up and sing. One guy (yes a man) sang 'Like a Virgin.' I thought, 'now that takes balls.' Anyway, there was a Native American guy who was there that I hadn't seen in about 15 years. We went outside to chat and have a cigarette. Ladies, this man is hot. He's older, has semi-long hair pulled back in a pony tail, smooth face. We were talking (we used to be extremely good friends), talked about some Indian stuff, how I (and this is true) had a medicine man from the UP in Michigan take a spirit out of me etc. etc. He had some turned on eyes that kept looking into mine. Glad I brought condoms. 'Nuf said. Yes ladies, I moaned, I almost damn near screamed. OK, yes I am a self-proclaimed lesbo, but that mainly applies to relationships. When it comes to sex, I'm extremely open-minded. And I do have a weakness for tan-skinned men. My first husband was 1/2 Indian (Native American), 1/2 Hispanic.

There were four of us women in a room. And we're all tough as nails bitches. And we were walking together, no one fucked with us. Nothing like the NA sisterhood. Talk about bad bitches.

OK, I've prattled on long enough. I'm not implying anything, not trying to say anyone here needs recovery from drugs. No. But it was just what I needed. When we left Indy it was 67 degrees and sunny. Damn, had to come back to South Bend where it's grey and cold. Oh well. It was definitely worth it.

Nothing new to report. Weekend is going by fast and have a training class next week so its going to eat up some of my days off that I get during the week. My roommate is also gone for the week at another training class. So its going to be weird to have the house to my self again. I have gotten so use to having someone around. But oh well I am sure that I will manage. Today I went to breakfast with some friends then my girlfriend and I came back and walked off breakfast. I decided to run some errands and found my way to the health food store and picked up some Vitamin D since my mother is only 64 and has advanced stages of osteoporosis as well as I picked up some fish oil and green tea. Everyone keeps telling me fish oil is good for you and green tea helps for so many different things. So I figured what could it hurt.

Well, the guy front is going well. The flower guy or Whitey as we will call him since he is not Latin and I have been talking everyday. He has his son this weekend so we did not do anything this week, which is OK. We have been talking just about everyday and today he told me that he was wondering if we could see each other for a couple hours while his son is at school. His words were to me that he did not want to wait until next weekend to see me. I sure hope that he will fill the same way after I disclose to me. Its weird, I have a different feeling about him than I have had with other men in the past. I am not in a hurry to jump into things with him, like I was with the Latin Lover. Is it that I maybe deep down I really like this guy and want him to get to know me before we sleep together if it gets to that point. I guess I am hoping that if I take things slow he will see what kind of person I am and he will be OK with my status. Like I said its just weird that I am not in a hurry to jump into things with this guy and its not because I am not interested in him.

Well, Queen I am glad you are sticking to your guns about Kevin. If you decide to let him back into your life you need to make him work for it.

Betty-You go girl. I hope moaned so loud that you kept everyone awake. I love my men dark. When I found out that I was positive I was dating this guy and he was 1/2 Native American and 1/2 Latin. I think we would still be together if he was not so damn jealous. But we are still friends and boy could he cook, he was Chef. God I miss his cooking.

Moon- I hope you get figured out what is causing your low iron. I doubt that you are bleeding internalling. Wouldn't you see blood in your stool? But I am no doctor, but I will say I believe in the Chiropractor thing. I was an officer manager for one for 10 years before I got into law enforcement. I miss working for one, got free adjustments whenever I wanted. My neck and shoulders never felt so good.

Winn- I don't think that I ever said congrats on your new grandchild. Enjoy

Hi Snow I hope you are doing well. How did your chili turn out and did your Dad like it?

Mini- I hope that your restful sleep continues. I am having trouble keeping me eyes open now and its only 630pm in California. And I hope that your perpetuating something that's been holding on works its self out.

Thanks to all of you who gave me feedback on the iron stuff. I am taking a pill called "Slow Fe" which digests less rapidly than traditional iron pills. I took my first last night, and was regular today, so all is well.

Queen, you asked why the doc thought I might be bleeding internally. Usually if iron levels are low, it could be from diet or heavy periods or a "leak" somewhere in the gastric system. Perhaps a bleeding ulcer, gastritis, etc. My digestion has never been a problem for me, and I agree with you Sun, I am sure I would see some evidence in the bowl if I was having probs.

Queen, why don't you shock the shit out of Kevin next time he calls and just answer? LOL Tell him you aren't interested and maybe he will stop his stupid games with you. You shouldn't have to go change your number for a toad, ribbit, just tell him the deal. Tell him to leave you alone.

Betty, sounds like you had an awesome weekend. In more ways than one! OMG WHO would've thought BT would be singing soprano at Indy? LOL At least you were prepared Way to go, SO GLAD you enjoyed yourself!

Sun, Whitey sounds great. Its nice that he wants to see you and can't wait, lol. I love that kinda stuff. Isn't it nice when a man is mature enough to respect you but sweet enough to be a kid at heart, too? GO SEE HIM!

I went to Iceman's tonight to visit for a few hours. I got to his neighborhood as he was leaving and he flashed his lights at me, he was taking his kids back home. I just looked straight ahead and drove past him. I could see his youngest in the back seat, just the top of a head, and it nearly killed me. I haven't met the kids--its not time yet, but gosh I want to be a part of their lives so badly. I will be patient.

Iceman and I went to dinner tonight, not what I expected to do. Aunt Flo's plane is delayed and she hasn't come in for landing yet so I thought we would be going straight to the bedroom, lol. I wore a leather jacket, a long-sleeved H-D shirt and my 4-inch high heeled leather back boots. And some tight-ass jeans. I turned some heads on the drive through town. It was a good feeling, but its mild here today, I think everyone was horny, lol!

Then Ice says lets go out to dinner, some guy asked if we were out riding our Harley today, lmao. I had on the shirt and Ice had on a new leather H-D riding jacket. I have never been on a Harley in my life, Ice just bought me the shirt this Christmas. We had a nice dinner at a Mexican restaurant, and then went home and exchanged massages in front of the fireplace. VERY soothing. OMG, I thought I already knew everything there was to know about this man, but we had a most DIVINE evening.

And I am actually looking forward to going to work tomorrow. I'm just not going to have my ass probed. Nope, nada, executive decision on that one!

Oh and he also wants a "sample" from me, as in like when you take your dog to the vet.

Moon-Like you don't feel bad enough already! Have you seen the website where they actually do this for a turn on? It is friggin nasty!! Happy 4 mos, you guys celebrated in a nice way. My mans idea of going out to eat is McDonalds I hope you and your docs get everything figured out soon.

Sun- It sounds like Whitey is a cool dude. I hope things work out with him, the disclosure goes well and you can get your "groove" on. I hope the training goes well this week too. I so wish I was in CA right now. My parents and I took the kids to VT today and some of the streets signs were barely visible because the snow was high. As long as my father didn't have to make it , he will love the chili. I made it spicy just for him How is running going? I am going to see if I have any mula I can send out to you? I hate fundraising. I did March of Dimes last year and I got the $150. OOOhh. I might have better luck this year, I can hit up the lady I volunteer/work for

Queen- I am a Masshole and we don't have beer delivery as far as we know. I literally live right around the corner from where the poor Dominoes pizza delivery guy got killed ,so I wouldn't deliver anything in this town either. I wouldn't want fried dick either but wouldn't mind doing it to some of the deserving dicks in my past. It would be bring a whole new meaning to "Fry Daddy"

Betty got some booty, Betty got some booty! YeeHAH! You go girl. I am so glad you had a great weekend and are in a serene place right now. Those must have been some amazing and uplifting stories to listen to. Glad you made it home safe and sound.

Win- We are getting there, its going to 50 tomorrow. Geez, I don't know what Im gonna do. Oh, I know drive back and forth to school and...nothing. I hope you are enjoying the new baby too, I didn't mean to leave you out when I posted earlier.

The sleigh ride was nice today. Cold as hell but what can you do. The horses were strong as hell. I think they said they can pull like 10 to 12,000 pds, something crazy.

Hope everyone has good night and a good start to a new week. I can't believe it is March already.Snow

Well I finished what I could and am just going to take care of the rest tomorrow. I just couldn't look at the computer anymore.

Moon- I was severely anemic right around my diagnosis last year. My ID doctor referred me to a Hematologist. He did blood and stool test. That wasn't a big deal. You just do the sample "swipe" at home. What was bad was the bone marrow test he performed. He wanted to make sure the problem wasn't the marrow. It was extremely painful. There is a description on Webmd...LOL! My mother, who can handle anything, went with me and she almost lost it. She said she had never seen anything so barbaric. If I ever have to do anything like that again I will demand they knock me out. I was very sore for a few days after too. Hopefully they won't have to do that to you. In they end they just determined it was because of the HIV and the meds.

I got another message from Kevin saying that we need to talk. I don't think so. I don't think he is saying it because there is something I need to know but just cause he wants to try to explain himself and I'm not trying to hear it. I heard it when I was there. I'm just going to get my number changed, I had been talking about doing it before he came along anyway. And my ghetto cell phone company allows you to do it for free but only after you pay your bill...LMAO, how ghetto is that.

Betty got some bootyWell, amen and hallelujah girl. I think you were overdue for some. I'm glad you got it on your terms. And an Indian, oooooh, my mind went straight to the gutter.... Sharkie got some competition now. Betty got laid by the Shaman of Sexy (catch phrase I took from wrestling but it works here). You go, girl!!!! I wish I was a fly on the wall, well, not really but am buzzed at the moment. Drinking and toking so I am feeling a bit horny right about now. But I'll deal with that later. I'm also glad that you had such a good time at the convention. And you were going to pass it up...Give your friend who paid your way a big kiss from me. I am happy you had such a nice time.

Sun----LMAO@the name Whitey...No, I am done with Kevin. I guess I'll just fall back into celibacy cause it's not likely I will run into a poz man around here. I am not happy about it but I guess that is the way it is meant to be. And at this point, I am tired of trying. I gave it a whirl 3 times and all of them ended badly for one reason or another.

Snow--- Masshole? Not familiar? Massachusetts?

I am off to play some more Warcraft before bed. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow with the primary. I will keep you all posted...

Sun, I hope this guy works out for you. I'm sure you know from your past experiences how to take things. Don't go falling head-over-heels before you truly know him. My first husband was extremely jealous. There was this one time when we were driving home, another car with guys went by and they stared at me. My husband yelled "I'm fucking her!" What an ass.

Cin, you've never been on a Harley? Why was I thinking you have? You'll love it, trust. They call Harley's the 'ladies choice' because they vibrate. And that's a turn-on in itself, being on a bike, not much space between your legs and the guy's ass on a bike. Well, you get the picture. I really hope this iron thing works for you. Please let us know.

Snow, I don't know what Masshole means either. It's 54 here right now, but it's supposed to be falling into the 30's by late afternoon. I am so sick of this shit. Hopefully things will be getting better, I mean, we are heading there anyway (to spring).

Viv, are you still working on report cards?

Queen, what the hell does Kevin 'need' to talk to you about? If you get some flowers delivered, maybe. You know how to handle the man. Yes, that man (Indian in Indy) could have been termed the Shaman of Sex(y). He's older and his hair's grey, but the way he looked with it pulled into a ponytail, and those goddamn eyes. Sharkie is going to have to come up with something to get my attention. Oh, are you going to watch 'The Wire' today? I'm anxious to see what happens, especially with McNulty. Yes, let us know what happens at your doc's today.

I thought I'd get more sleep than what I did, but what the hell, I went to bed around 10:30 last night. I've got another 1/2 pot of coffee brewing. I didn't post anywhere else in these forums yet, just did a little looksey last night. I was exhausted, but it was a good type of being tired. Today I'm just going to pay bills, do a little grocery shopping and I guess that's about it. My new class starts tomorrow night. I've dropped one class, so things should be better there. I'll check in later- *listening to Erotic City by Prince*

Logged

I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Im just just stopping in. Im at work. The sun is shining here. The weather has been 76 the last couple of days. Its great. It is supposed to rain today with large hail. Well I'll just be damned.

Betty- congrad's on getting you some. Since we found out we were positive it has not been much sex my way. We will do it like every now and then. Right now I'm horny as hell. Its just so much a Bullet, a Beaver and a Jack Rabbit can do for me. Shit I thought about sex yesterday and almost had a spasm.

Snow- What is masshole???

Just a question to everyone. I know that we are supposed to have sez with condoms "safer sex" I was just wondering would it hurt to start of with out a condom and put one on mid way or may if he pulled out. Just asking.