Who says you can’t keep enjoying life in the midst of difficult challenges? Regardless of the catastrophe, when life hands you the proverbial lemon don’t settle for lemonade. Grab yourself some tequila, salt and a blender – then savor your lemon margarita with a smile on your face.

Cancer Fatigue

Last week I went to my breast cancer support group (it’s called Bosom Buddies – clever, huh?) to hear a guest speaker talk about cancer fatigue. I have been going to this group off and on since shortly after my diagnosis and this was the first time we had a speaker. I was especially interested in this topic because fatigue is my biggest challenge at this stage of the game. I sleep A LOT and getting out of bed in the morning sometimes feels like it takes superhuman strength.

So that morning my husband got up and got ready for work while I was still in bed. Like every morning he came over to kiss me goodbye and asked, “So what are you doing today?” I sleepily answered that I was going to my support group to hear a speaker talk about cancer fatigue. Then I said, “I’m sooo tired.” Bill laughs and says, “Now wouldn’t that be funny if you missed the talk on cancer fatigue because you were too tired to get out of bed?” Ha! Too true.

Well I made it to the group after all, though I was about 15 minutes late. When I came in she was talking about how researchers have confirmed that cancer fatigue is a real thing. No duh! We already knew it was real. We didn’t need researchers to figure that out for us. But I got her point. Basically what cancer survivors have been complaining about for years has finally been validated by science. I guess that means we are vindicated; science has confirmed that it’s not all in our heads, we’re not just lazy, and we’re not “milking this cancer thing”. My friends and family have been very understanding, but unfortunately that’s not true for everyone. And even for me, I feel pretty self conscious about the fatigue, like people aren’t going to believe me.

So as the talk continued, I waited anxiously to hear what we can do about it – that’s what everyone in the room wanted to know. What we got, though, wasn’t much. She talked about a few drugs you can take, as well as some herbs, and encouraged us to exercise. But she qualified everything with, “It may or may not help, but you can try it.” So basically she was telling us that there’s not much we can do. Researchers have confirmed that it’s real, but they don’t yet know how to solve the problem. For now cancer fatigue is something that can only be managed and not cured. Which means we pretty much just have to deal with it. Which, of course, sucks.

This was disheartening for all of us, and some women got emotional about it. Out of a room of 20+ people only two people still work full time. One woman tearfully shared that she had to quit a job that she loved because she couldn’t make it through the day without falling asleep at her desk. Another woman choked back the tears as she shared her struggles about still working, but barely being able to hold it together. I can relate. Before cancer I worked 10-hour shifts, 4-days a week, on my feet the entire day. Even back then it was tiring – there’s no way I could do that job now. I currently sleep 9 or 10 hours a night and then I still need a 2-hour nap every day.

When Bill got home from work I told him, “The cancer fatigue thing sucked. Basically they told us researchers have confirmed it’s a real thing but they don’t have much to offer when it comes to fixing it.” I hugged him and then said, “I don’t want to be tired forever.”