This Study Says If You’re An Angry Drunk Guy, Odds Are You’re Also Thin Because You’re A Genetic Freak

Fark pointed me to this Medical Daily report on a study that shows the gene which makes bros angry, reckless drunks is also responsible for giving them thin, healthy bodies. Cue “Bittersweet Symphony” by The Verve.

Or, maybe those skinny drunk bros are angry because they’re hungry af. I dunno, could go either way. The title of the study is “The effects of a HTR2B stop codon and testosterone on energy metabolism and beta cell function among antisocial Finnish males”, which sounds pretty vague. We’re gonna need more detail to figure this whole thing out.

98 Finnish males, aged 25–30 with “antisocial personality disorder” (ASPD, ” a mental condition in which a person has a long-term pattern of manipulating, exploiting, or violating the rights of others”), were divided into groups based on those who have this gene mutation (linked to impulsive behavior) and those who don’t.

Body mass index (BMI) was determined.

Those who carried gene mutation were protected from obesity due to higher insulin sensitivity, which means lower blood glucose levels, which means lower BMI.

As a fatty, I don’t get angry when drunk. Hugs not knucks. Most times. I definitely got supremely pissed when a couple girls we brought back to our backyard hot tub didn’t take their bras off. I believe I yelled, “What are we even doing then? What did you think was gonna happen?” In my defense, I was seriously Atkins-ing. No excuses. Play like a champion. I apologize. But, hey, at least I didn’t get so angry that I poured vodka in their eyes. I’m an @sshole, not a caveman.