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BAD SANTA: Did you tell Santa to save himself a trip this year because there's no question which side of the ledger you're on? If so, then tonight's Naughty Santa party at Stone Lotus is where you want to be, brought to you by the Surreal Chicago, the same promoters known for their lingerie balls and risque Halloween blowouts. Start sniffling at work today to set up Wednesday's sick call. 11p.m.-4 a.m., 873 N Orleans St, RSVP for no cover before midnight or text "surreal stonelotus" to 46786.

ACROSS THE POND: Fish sounds like a good idea right about now, especially with holiday-related food staring you in the face at every turn, but the only "pounds" you'll be saving will be in your wallet at Blokes & Birds' weekly Fish & Chips Feast. The new British gastropub offers up a Tuesday night all-you-can-eat special for only $12. Executive Chef Greg Cannon prepares the dish with malt vinegar aioli, thick cut tartar sauce and served with chips. That's fries for you Yankee types. 3343 North Clark St, 773-472-5252

2014 New Year's Eve Party Planner

OLD JACK SWING: Step back in musical time at The Charleston tonight with a set called "The Gaslight Sessions." DJs spin modern interpretations of such genres as neo-swing, gypsy, new vaudeville-cabaret, circus music, klezmer and steampunk. Resident DJ The Lord Baron Joseph C.R. Vourteque holds things down with a number of guest spinners. 10 p.m., 2076 N. Hoyne Ave., NO COVER