Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Noodle War!

Notice anything different about the V-Bar?Take a closer look:That's a very large and broken window, my friend. I swear to God that this kind of stuff doesn't happen very often in Belltown - especially on a Tuesday evening - but last night there was a full-fledged dumbass street fight going on right across the way. Here's how I saw it: I was in bed sleeping, when the sounds of a loud argument woke me. Two guys were screaming at each other, liberally peppering their remarks with the n-word, and a woman with a super-annoying voice was apparently shouting at one or both of them. I couldn't tell what she was saying. Stuff like this usually defuses itself in minutes, if not seconds. The two shouting parties separate, head off in opposite directions and tell their buddies just how much they're gonna mess that other guy up if they should ever cross paths again. That didn't happen. It got louder and more aggressive. At this point, I'm still in bed. I can't tell where this conflict is coming from. The acoustics on this part of 2nd are weird. Sometimes stuff happening right under my window sounds far away and things down the block sound like they're happening inside my apartment. This yelling match actually sounded like it was happening down the block. It wouldn't have mattered at all if there hadn't been this leap in volume, even more n-bombs falling, then these two huge crashing sounds. I got up and looked across the street. The V-Bar's window was broken just like you see above (only glass was everywhere) and a bunch of guys were scuffling on the sidewalk. You couldn't really call it a fight. It was just some guys (all of whom appeared to be Asian; so why employ the n-word, dudes?) running in, throwing a punch or two, missing, retreating, then repeating the process again. The action flowed along about a hundred feet of sidewalk. I couldn't tell whose side was doing what or who the good guys were. At the same time, people were fleeing the V-Bar. One woman jumped in her car, made a U-turn and began driving into oncoming traffic. All the while, these guys were trying unsuccessfully to brawl. It was mesmerizing, and it lasted many minutes. I knew the cops would eventually show up. I could see a guy from Under the Needle calling them. But these dumbasses were committed to fighting. I think that in all that time, I saw only one punch land. Every other one missed its mark. Grappling was minimal, since everyone was all about throwing their punches and running away. Just as the action seemed to fizzle, somebody fired a gun. I couldn't see who it was because of the stupid tree in front of my window, so I don't know whether they were firing at somebody or not. All I know is that it really was a gun and nobody was hit. The cops eventually showed up and calmed things down. It took them about ten minutes to get there. I expected them to be in full nightstick-swinging mode, but no such luck. They initially did a lot of yelling and things quieted remarkably quickly. I don't know if anyone was arrested. The woman with the super-annoying voice from the beginning of the festivities spent a long time shouting at somebody. Everybody eventually hit the road. That left the job of cleaning up the glass to the V-Bar staff. It was really loud. It took me more than an hour to get back to sleep.

I'm pretty sure that this wasn't gang-related. These guys fought too poorly and had no intention of getting away before the cops arrived. But it was a strange sight. I've seen lots of fights before; they usually involve just two guys (girlfights are very rare) who, instead of going toe-to-toe, immediately clinch and fall to the sidewalk, roll around for a bit until both are filthy and exhausted. This action was a completely different animal. I've never seen as many guys involved before. If there were a few more on each side, it would have been a total street riot. I haven't been able to find out anything about this incident from the local rags, so I'll give the cops a call and update when I find out something new. Till then, welcome to Belltown, home of the Battle of V-Bar, first (and hopefully last) action of the Noodle War.

Seattle is quite a beautiful city, no doubt about that. The Belltown neighborhood doesn’t swing that way. Much of it is downright hideously ugly. If not for all that ugliness, there’d be nothing to see. I’ve lived here for 20 years and I’ve only just started taking notice. Please join me on this odyssey of unsightliness as we try to figure out why poor Belltown looks so bad.