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Sunday, December 18, 2011

Reasons it's good being single during the holidays

Since it’s December and all the single people out there are sick of seeing couples doing cute, couple-y things like ice skating hand-in-hand, making snow angels and drinking egg nog in front of a fire while gazing into each others eyes, I’m here to tell you that being single during the holiday season isn’t that bad.

I know all that stuff sounds like SO much fun, but before you write your “are you there Santa, it’s (your name here),” letter to some old dude who likes to rub his belly, read this.

It’s good to be single during the holidays because:

1. Think of all the money you're saving on gifts and now able to spend on yourself. Also think of all the coats you can buy at year-end sales! So many coats!

2. If you want to spread holiday cheer in bed with something new and festive, now’s the time to try that snow blowing thing you heard about. Because trust me, if you do it to your boyfriend, I’m pretty sure you will be single this holiday season (unless that’s your thing, I guess).

3. You can eat and drink whatever you want because you don’t need to worry about how you look in bed. So stop eyeing that gingerbread house and eat it already.

4. You've only just met that person you're dating, so what the heck do you buy them? Or do you buy them a gift? Wait, are they religious? Do they celebrate Christmas? Or do they hate the holidays because they had a troubled childhood? <-- did I stress you out yet?

5. You don’t have to pretend you like the scarf your boyfriend gave you. You saved money on not buying a gift for someone else so you can just buy whatever you want.

6. You can finally go to that naughty holiday party your deviant friends keep inviting you to. You know, the one where the girls wrap themselves as gifts but are just wearing bows around their chests?

7. There are tons of parties this time of year, so flirt your little heart out. I’m serious. Tape mistletoe to your hat. Why not?

8. You don’t have to worry about going to family parties for his or her side. Nor do you have to worry about buying gifts for people you don’t really know and aren’t sure if you will know next year. Ek.

9. It’s New Years Eve: be slutty. Okay, maybe only a little slutty.

10. If you’re one of those people who loves singing really good-bad Christmas songs at the top of your lungs: sing them. No one’s around to be turned off.

BAHAHAHAHA! I'll admit I had to Google snow blowing. I didn't know there was a name to that. Most of your list applies to married girls...they have the ring and the piece of paper making it legal. There's no need to impress him anymore. ;) Have an awesome holiday season!