I found myself walking around the Oscar de La Renta exhibition at the Museum of Fine Arts the day before NYE and staring at the most amazing woven tapestry style coat and while I kept strolling, I began to reflect on the past year. It’s weird because I saw this bizarre trend on Instagram where people were turning their stories into these extended summaries of their year, where they posted a snap of each month (which sidenote – who on earth has the time to save all those photographs for a year, then remembers to go back and retrieves them, puts them in an orderly fashion, complete with captions, filters, hashtags – I digress – so I’ll just continue going through them like the nosy person I am) mentioning the memorable moments. Many people posted their personal achievements and stuff they did, and to be honest, it made me feel like a voyeur witnessing shameless bragging.

I was really saddened when I began to feel very unaccomplished and small … don’t you feel small and overwhelmed when you sit on social media for too long? … oh … okay, just me then… Anyway, I tend to get really anxious when I see what people are doing, which more power to them, that is great – but I got sucked into the byproduct of the annoying mosh pit of judgement and jealousy and comparison that appears in the center of all the people who simply came to praise themselves.

But doesn’t that also sound really pompous? Well, on one hand, it is great to feel acknowledgement when you publish a photo on Instagram documenting your weightless journey, or a photo celebrating your anniversary. But on the other hand, with the mosh pit I just mentioned, it really sucks to feel like you aren’t at the same level that everyone else seems to be at, and it seems insensitive and almost offensive (from this bitter and jaded perspective) to receive notifications of people saying “yay me, look at what I did this year, clap for me!”

All bitterness aside, these ideas and feelings flashed through my mind at a mile a minute as I also tried to calculate the price of this tapestry coat (roughly ten thousand dollars if it’s OdLR couture, so not accessible to me in this lifetime) and I came to what I think is the most mature and grown up solution to this self imagined situation.

Quick disclaimer* I hate strongly dislike resolutions as they feel forced and fake to me, and 9 times out of 10 they are not carried out. Something about this tapestry coat spoke to me though. So I made a mental note that I guess qualifies as a resolution because it was within a 24 hour parameter of the end of the year…blehto

1) stop being so negative because it most likely sending out negative vibes and bringing me down

2) stop simply saying that I will stop comparing myself to other people and just do it already

3) stop using social media so much since I clearly have once again developed a dependence on social media and the need to feel validated/acknowledged in order to see myself as someone worthwhile

After coming up with this list I smiled to myself, finally prepared for the new year and finally feeling fulfilled. Okay so moral of the story: I reached my own fulfillment on my own, and I no longer feel jealous of the “new year, new me, new goals” overload that I was bombarded with online****.

ANYWAY, here are some snazzy pictures that my fantastic friend Roya took of me three weeks ago that have NOTHING to do with this post, but made me happy, and on that very weak segue let’s move on.

Bet you thought it was too cold for a skirt. Fashion > practicality. Constance Billard School for Girls uniforms meet Braids and … Boots?I LOVE having my blue phone make an unwanted cameo in my pocket. Said no one ever. I should make this a postcard or something, I really love this look, and this is coming from a recovering skirt hater.

I bought those Ivanka Trump boots in 2014, when supporting the Trump family did not make me gag, nor did it mean anything yet compared to today’s American society. I also cannot just get rid of them, since that would go against my ethical fashion beliefs and they are vegan suede and I really like them and I am getting good wear out of them. That is all I have to say.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

**** PS. I still have tabs open with Google results for “internet detoxing” and “how to get off the grid like Ron Swanson”

I am currently sitting on campus, sporting a beret (I love that all of a sudden people are into wearing them when we fashion lovers are aware that the beret was never really ‘out’ of style) of all things, and a head to toe black look. I feel very much like someone who dropped out of their art history appreciation class in this look. But not relevant right now.

also before I forget, behold a blurry picture of my handmade Fran Fine costume.

I have had one heck of a semester. Challenging? Yes. Tiring? Yes. Fun? OF course! But yes, I was very tired and was overwhelmed a few times, not to mention incredibly stressed, stressed to the point where I was not as interested in writing for the blog. And I don’t mean that I don’t love doing this, because I do, but I do feel like I have no ability to veil my current mindset when I write here. Other writing projects are sacred and I am professional and formal there, but for a blog – and personal blog at that – why on earth would I be anything but candid – ? See my point?

Anyway, I also think that discussing my homework assignments was what I spent 70% of my time doing, so I also considered how helpful it would be for me to dwell on my homework woes with an audience that comes here just for fashion and style musings. I quickly decided that for my own sanity, it was necessary for me to put the blog down and use both hands to juggle my schoolwork and attempts to forge a social life.

On the bright side, Christmas is coming! And I need to really get my shit together to post here more. I recently worked with a photographer in the Austin area (@harleyeldridge so you can stalk him like I did), and by recently, I mean as recently as 9 am today.

Which brings me to a few tips on posing for shoots: (for fashion shoots though, nothing crazy or portrait-y or senior graduation picture-y)

wear something relevant to your surroundings. I had a beret, but I wasn’t about to put that on when we wanted something urban that could exist in a concrete jungle.

be able to listen to a photographer when he tells you that your forehead lines keep appearing. A bit anecdotal advice (ahem, I still like my forehead lines making cameos in shots), but nevertheless useful for some people.

if it will be cold and you are shooting in warm weather clothing, or vice versa, just be prepared to throw stuff on or take off layers in between shots, or you might end up with freezing hands like moi this morning since I was convinced that I had predicted the weather and was 110% sure that it was going to be in the 60˚ range. I wasn’t about to be I-told-you-so’d, and when I saw that other people were fine and not freezing, and that it was just me being nervous and cold, I forced myself to keep my hands out of my pockets.

You’re welcome.

Anyway, just wanted to pop in, say hello, ask for divine intervention as I hit this home stretch of essays that I need to finish, and turn them all in before heading back to Houston tomorrow (in less than 24 hours!!!!) . Also we need to talk about the comeback of 2000’s fashion, which I believe I must have ranted about before somewhere here. WHYYYYYYYYY?????

That is all. Get excited, the fashion returns, but more importantly, the writer with a beret (they were always a thing, don’t listen to what they tell you). (Which reminds me: bucket hats and crocs (hideous foot swallowing beasts, those crocs are) were, are not, and NEVER will be a thing.)

Summer is breezing by, and I am unsure if I am looking forward to the school year, or just confusing those thoughts with being in the humidity too long, and it’s affecting my cognitive abilities.

On the fourth of July, I went to Bayou Bend, a renovated house and property that became a branch of the Museum of Fine Arts. There was a cheesy party for the fourth, and we went for the lemonade and the entertainment. Then we realized getting there, that the fireworks would obviously be at midnight, and we all wanted to be home way before then. So cue my family, making a fashionably late entrance, then taking a fashionably brief walk about the garden, and then making a very chic exit.

On the bright side, we enjoyed some pretty good lemonade. And I signed a declaration of independence that was bigger than one of the walls of my bedroom.

On an ethical note, my tank has been a go – to of mine for a while, I wear it quite a bit. My shorts are a hand me down AND I have worn them more than 30 times. HA. And yeah, my sandals are vegan leather so fight me.

My mouth is slightly agape here. You think I’m trying to pout like Keira Knightley or something…..and what’s sad is that I am actually panting. At least this photo doesn’t include the strange panting noises I’m sure I must have made at some point.

Fun fact: there was a group of little asian ladies who walked up to the gap between the bushes, took one look at me and my brother’s camera, and backed out of the shot, and they whispered a bit nearby (I had to stifle the awkward laughs for this photo).

Possibly not visible in these photos (and very lucky for me – I do NOT need you guys to see me melting into a puddle lol).

Yay summer, yay vacation, ugh no heat.

Also, I feel the need to explain my lack of posts. I recently started writing more, and embarked on a new project that I cannot talk about at the moment. It’s not a top-secret thing, but it has not fully come to fruition yet, so I don’t want to talk about it until it is for sure happening. Honestly, until I have a tangible end product, I won’t disclose it haha.

In other news, I had my second vegan anniversary yesterday! Not on the fourth, or third. Like, yesterday, July 13.

Maybe I will write a vegan post with tips and info and my experience after hitting the 2 year mark! I’m truly grateful to be able to live this lifestyle and thankful that I did make this decision. I feel happy and healthy and like I am making a positive contribution in a way. Yeah, just writing that makes me think that I will definitely be writing a post on that.

I’ll just leave these photos here for you, because I thought my ‘beat the heat’ outfit wasn’t bad at all! Okay — that was me modestly saying that I loved it.

So this is something I have thought of for weeks, so it is nothing new, and came to me after reading Man Repeller and seeing Leandra acknowledge that her uniform consists of denim hot pants, bare legs, and utility coats, and some great white t-shirt. And that got me to thinking – do I have a uniform?

Obviously as time goes on, our style develops into something that can continue to change, or become a general tendency to lean towards specific items. I feel like even though I have grown a bit more, and experimented a lot with my look, I was able to catch onto the pattern. The items I tend to reach for are tight pants, since I have accepted that wide leg pants are not petite friendly. High waisted things are a fixed item in my wardrobe, be they shorts or trousers, or even jumpsuits. Color-wise, the more neutral the items, the better. Black, grey, white, dark blues, greens, burgundies — those colors are the only ones I will look at anymore. It’s easiest when my entire wardrobe has a basic, duller color scheme, since the fabrics are what is nicest. I don’t really wear many t shirts and choose to wear blouse-y things and trousers, as I have realized that dressing down just does not exist for me. Sweats are seriously the antithesis of my existence. << I will trademark that phrase, so don’t take it. 😀

So if I had to coin a phrase to describe the style I have now, it would be

Note: when I say anyone from Mad Men, I really mean just Betty Draper or Megan Draper or Joan Harris.

Top / HM || Trouser-leggings / Zara || Shoes / Call it Spring

The “look at my feet” shot that actually is pretty uncomfortable

I was actually walking, but I made the mistake of talking, hence the weird facial expression * nod of acknowledgement to the high waistedness of the pants *

I think the point of what I am trying to say here is that while trends come and go, I will probably always wear heels to inconvenient places, wear tighter high waisted pants, and hoops. And I finally am getting used to that and warming up to the idea.

It feels so odd to be saying that right now, as I scroll through my old posts and wonder where the time has gone. I feel as if I owe everyone an explanation for my absence here.

So while I know that you all are perfectly justified in being angry with me, here I go attempting an apology. Or at least presenting a solid alibi, whichever works better.

This will also probably become some sort of rant inevitably, so disclaimer – if you aren’t in for the long haul you might want to click away, haha.

First of all, I would like to point out how much work goes into each post. For a professional blogger who made this their full time job, there is a photographer required for every. Single. Shoot… And for every. Single. Post. And unfortunately, my younger brother a few months ago realized that photographing my outfits out of the “goodness of his heart” (my words, not his) was doing nothing for his wallet. To be fair, it was a crap deal we had going on, at least on his end. And I laughed it off. But then I realized I had no one to hold the camera and actually snap the photo, and then the laughing ended. So I hunted photographers, but no one was A) near enough to work with or B) was interested in working with a newer, less followed blogger. SEE everyone? THIS is why bloggers date people who are good with photography; they get free photos. Smart smart smart.

Another reason I was distanced from the blog was school. Always school. Courses got harder, my study breaks became smaller and less frequent, and thus became consumed with me slipping in clips of the show Victoria on PBS (I am a fangirl for that show I swear the costumes must be crafted out of angel hair and swan feathers or something) , or Mad Men (not surprising for me). I also became a bit of a vintage freak, stalking vintage accounts and sellers on Instagram, but never actually bidding on things due to sizing qualms.

So there are my two largest reasons. Another relevant reason was this fear that I was not living in the moment, but instead just thinking of when and what to post, and if I had enough clothing for posts. Which is not the point of ethical living — a goal I am actively pursuing. Shopping mindfully is something I try to do, and if my blog was standing in the way of that main goal, then it had to be put on hold.

BUT I won’t lie, I missed the mini platform I had to write and rant on that was in my control all the time. So here I am, again. It’s summer, and I am here, but I won’t guarantee how active I can be, since I will be a bit busy this summer (more on that another time). For now, I CAN guarantee an outfit MWAH HA HA. Someone’s brother was in a good mood and agreed to being a photographer for the day.

Downtown Houston, how I missed you. Suburbs….well, let’s just say I have a growing fiery pit of lava feeding on fervid hatred and swirling flames of discomfort and a mild allergic reaction when I think of you.

a moment of gratitude to the hair gods for helping me make a bun today. that is all.smiling because I am fighting the bitch face, but look at the shoes *cries*. divinity in a shoe.detailed shot of the perforation of my bag – love that – and the lace top…*yells at the top of lungs* I HAVE BECOME A TABLECLOTH come be my friendactually serious styling tip – cuffing pants makes your legs look longer. I don’t know how many more times I have to say it to prove it to you all.

Outfit Details:

Top/Zara // Pants/ H&M (old) // Shoes/Nanette Lepore // Bag/gifted

** “The Tempest” Playbill not available for sale 😀

There you go! My latest outfits are mostly in grayscale, or at least in dark colors. In lieu of prints I lean towards textures and fabrics, which are more fun anyway. I saw the Houston Ballet’s version of “The Tempest” and was entranced, and stepped out for a second to get these photos of this outfit. My top was actually fished off a rack in Zara that was covered in those pseudo Johanna Ortiz tops. Even though I feel like a human doily, I can live with that. The ruffled shoulders are actually (oh good god I’m about to say it) fun?

Last thing I will say: those shoes. They are precious, and I love anything pointy-toed. If I see a pair of black shoes that threaten to mold my feet into triangles by the end of the day and have sandpaper for soles sign me up. I will gladly break in those death traps for you. Years of practice of wearing uncomfortable shoes left me numb anywhere below my mid calf area, so these were great. I realize now sitting at home with my feet propped up that the skin has been rubbed raw in a few places but THAT IS OKAY. All is fair in love and fashion.

I spent a quaint evening with my family, mostly frolicking with sparklers, dancing about in some fabulously over the top tights (I hate the word pantyhose, fun fact – once its said, nothing else can be said to make up for it), and hogging all of the brussels sprouts.

And here is my outfit, which is probably what everyone came here for:

I am very proud to say that my outfit was very sustainable, with an old dress I managed to make new again with funky tights that reminded me of Fran Drescher as the Nanny and basic booties.

None of what I wore was ‘current’. Isn’t that weird? This is where I will get all corny and reflect on unremarkable things yet explain how they truly mean something much deeper. This year I became much more aware of my impact on the world as a consumer. I learned that having a large closet does not immediately mean being stylish. Once this was presented to me, I was finally able to see the way social media accounts force shove a specific image into the spotlight, and set it as the example to follow. That revelation led to figuring out my style and has allowed me to pare down on unnecessary shopping and the constant need to fit what others think is correct.

Now I will be very cautious with the resolutions I leave here, since I feel uneasy when something is established as important and basically etched in stone (more like etched in pixels), but I do have a few goals for this year.

Obviously to get good grades in college, because law school, and law school… and law school.

Try to focus on writing more

Work on cooking skills

Get better at yoga

Do I need to say the obvious ones- like drinking more water?

Happy New Year, and wish us all luck with our resolutions, no matter how sustainable and realistic they are! **sips water, thinks again, gulps down a cup of water**

I am going to be honest. I’m listening to Michael Bublé’s Christmas album right now.

Today did not make it easy to find something to be grateful for (especially when your leggings are soaked and stuck to you and require surgical removal, or coaxing with paper towels). Nevertheless, I was struck by the amazing weather when I went out later after the rain had moved on. The sky was grey and melancholy, and the wind allowed me to pretend that I was in some moody old town in New England. Seeing the clouds drifting by reminded me that the weekend is coming. Well tomorrow is Friday, which is basically the weekend, right? And that means going home, which means family, which means happiness. And the renaissance festival in Houston!

So thanks rain. You reminded me that just like storms that tear through the area, there is still an ethereal beauty in nature.

That being said, I am still bitter about the fact that you ruined my Toms earlier.

Yay rain! Yay for fridays! I’ll even throw in an honorable mention to my wellies for pulling through.