Topic: I am so depressedPosted By: christainwoman
Subject: I am so depressed
Date Posted: 11 October 2005 at 10:09am

I don't know who to talk to or what to do with my life. I am so depressed and want to be happy again. I try to read bout Islam because I really want to learn...but I can never consentrate. I donno what to Do I am so lost and confussed. Can someone please help me? I just need to fully love Islam to be happy and can't. Please someone help me!!!!!!!!
Taryn

Replies: Posted By: Abeer23
Date Posted: 11 October 2005 at 10:46am

May Allah guide you. Sis, none of us can make you love Islam. You have to love it for yourself. We can't make you study, you have to want to and then study for yourself. But, if you have any questions, we'll all do our best to answer

Have a blessed Ramadan

Salaam

Posted By: Jenni
Date Posted: 11 October 2005 at 12:29pm

Take it easy sister, try to just read the Quran and go to
www.soundvision.com and look through all the books, dvds ect and you
can order some things that seem interesting to you. It is ok to learn
little by little, learn to pray, understand ramadan and paying
zakat(charity) all converts go through a learning period an no one
should expect too much from you. Don't get discouraged and you can
allways make Dua(pray in your own words or in your heart) any time you
need to. It doesn't have to be just in the formal prayer. Inshalla you
will feel better... Peace

-------------You cant be a good muslim if you are not decent and have a cold heart. Be a decent and kind person and care for women and children and the elderly.

Posted By: karimah
Date Posted: 11 October 2005 at 2:35pm

Salam Alaikum

I would just like to say you cant love something until you understand it. The more you learn about Islam the more you will love it dont give up trying we all had to start somewhere and remember everything takes time

Posted By: herjihad
Date Posted: 11 October 2005 at 5:48pm

Bismillah,

I learn a very little bit at a time. Keeping at it over time has helped me learn more than I thought I could have.

I heard a story, which I think was about Omar, May Allah, SWT, listen to him. The point was that he didn't study something new in the Holy Quran until he had implemented what he had just learned.

You could pm me or someone else to help keep your spirits up. We all need each other. May Allah, SWT, our creator and supporter give you strength, wisdom, and comfort.

-------------Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.

Posted By: queenie
Date Posted: 12 October 2005 at 7:58am

i am speaking from experience here and think you should increase doing good deeds and decrease your bad deeds. good deeds are not always big things like giving charity but they can be the smallest of actions like smiling at a sister for the pleasure of allah swt, or removing an obstacle from someones path to please allah. to pray regularly on time and to keep company with people who act as a reminder of allah. Before I felt like this at once stage in my life too. It was really weird because I was extremely popular, had so many friends and I would always be out socialising with them. But whenever i would get a minute to myself i would feel really sad. Like as if I'm in search of somthing. It sounds weird...but I can't explain. then somthing major in my life happened and i went into deppression. soon after that one of my close friends started practising islam for a while and then she leaft it. I think that was due to her company which included me. Then I don't know why i started to dislike her because she turned away from islam yet i didn't understand because i was not very islamic myself. slowly slowly i started to learn about islam i started going to talks and there i would often here the importance of good deeds and how action you should do should be for the sake of allah and allah alone. so this made me change my lifestyle. sis i can't explain but i think it made me a more humble person and i tried to do things that i would never have done before because i never use to think they were a big deal. i started reciting the prayers before eating, before entering the house, before making a journey. I would constantly try to remember allah. Because at talks I heard that Allah swt says that he will remember those who remember him, praise him and thank him. then i tried to be friends with these people and practise my religion at the same time. but everytime i sat down to learn i'd get confused or lose concentration. because i was distracted by my social life. it was like i was leading a double life. so automatically i drew further away from my crowd. because i felt it was the right thing to do. i stopped going out late at night with them, parties everything. they all thought i was going mad but i wasn't. they were. i was content. and i wasn't deppressed any longer. i could be on my own and not feel sad. so sis there can be a number of things why you feel like this. but from my experience it was my lifestyle and the lack of islam. reading the qu'ran really early in the morning and really late at night really helped. i think islam is practical more than theoretical. implement it in your life everyday and insha allah you will experience and notice a difference. so seek knowledge and use it is my advice.

Posted By: Abeer23
Date Posted: 12 October 2005 at 10:15am

Queenie, Ma sha allah beautiful post. I agree with you 100%

Salaam

Posted By: karimah
Date Posted: 12 October 2005 at 12:59pm

Salam Alaikum

Queenie i wish you were around a few years ago you would have made my life so much easier.

Posted By: Henna
Date Posted: 13 October 2005 at 4:50pm

I am depressed too.. Because of some problems and because of my naive imaan :(

But i try to think the other muslim people in Pakistan now, in
Palestin, Chechenia, Africa.. So many poor people who are in war, who
can't find food or even water, who loose their loved one day by day,
who have nothing except their imaan... And then i found myself so
stupid, so stupid woman who cry.. who is depressed for such stupid
problems...

I am not in war area, i am healthy elhamdulillah, i have a shelter on
me, i can go to kitchen and i can eat whatever i want.. And still
i find so stupid things to worry and to cry..

It was not a good night for me tonight.. But i forced myself to think
about my sisters and brothers in poor regions.. We should always be in
shukr. Even we are in the most poor condition we should be thankfull
because we are muslims elhamdulillah...

If we think we haven't got anything, it means we didn't understand the
islam. We have Allah, we have imaan, we have the love of our prophet
(sav)..

I am such a stupid woman :(

Dear sister christainwoman;

as you see.. i'm in depression as well (time to time) but where can we go,
where can we lead to except Allah.. Allah is the only one who can hear us
and who can solve our problems.. and who can put the real imaan in our
hearts. The only thing we should do; just praying, praying,
praying..and obeying as well of course :)

ALLAH is the great... I know Allah is hearing our du'as and absolutely
will respond them...maybe in this world, maybe in the other... But
absolutely will answer them...

Posted By: herjihad
Date Posted: 14 October 2005 at 6:16am

Bismillah,

May Allah, SWT, cure you of your depression.

Exercise, no matter how little or what it is, will help alleviate depression. I have found the advice stated in a hadith helpful also. It goes something like: If you are sitting, stand; if you are laying down, stand up; like that; then, make wuduu, and if that doesn't help, say a couple rakas of prayer.

-------------Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.

Posted By: Hayfa
Date Posted: 14 October 2005 at 11:32am

A few things that have helped me on a functional level..

1. Go out and do something good for others

2. Make a list of positive things you will do for yourself. Depending upon what you already do this might be:

-prayers

-call a friend, meet for tea

-go to a lecture or class, take up a hooby you've always wanted to learn

-eat your favorite food

-find a way to laugh. I make sure to stay connected to people who help me laugh.

3. Exercise in some way. This has been shown to help peoples' mental states.

As far as Islam.. I would get really stressed about it. Take your time. Have patience and take care of yourself. It takes alot of time to absorb it all. Do what you can do, not what others might expect or you 'ideally' would want. We are all on a journey. you can only do what one step at a time. Sometimes I would mentally have to take a step back. Absorb and relax. As you see from others here it is a on-going process. Any person, whether Moslem or non-Moslem, trying to better themselves, will have struggles and at times confusion and different types of doubts. Our utter human-ness is revealed in this struggle.

-------------When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi

Posted By: Henna
Date Posted: 15 October 2005 at 9:27am

Yes, Islam is a journey; here is my journey story :)

Year 2002- Spring: I read the first time whole Kur'an-i Kerim in my own language. And i wanted to become a "real muslimah"

Year 2003- Spring: I started to pray few times.. i.e. 2 times per day, 6 times per week..

Year 2004- Spring: I wanted to wear my hijaab.

Year 2004- Autumn (Ramadhan): I started to wear my hijaab.

Year 2005- Spring: I started to pray 5 times per day.

Year 2005- Autumn: Elhamdulillah...

Posted By: herjihad
Date Posted: 15 October 2005 at 5:46pm

Bismillah,

That's sweet Sister Henna. I never drew up a timeline!

-------------Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.

Posted By: Abeer23
Date Posted: 16 October 2005 at 1:12am

Sister henna, beautiful journey ma sha allah.

Posted By: firewall
Date Posted: 16 October 2005 at 6:07pm

Posted By: Henna
Date Posted: 16 October 2005 at 9:34pm

Dear herjihad;
i think i am "too much" orginesed

Dear Abeer23;
Jazaak Allah..

Dear firewall;
I am agree with you.. Dear sister needs some friend..
I always wanted to go to Canada (Christianwoman is in Canada )

Posted By: sinful servant
Date Posted: 19 October 2005 at 1:54am

as salaam mu alaikum all!

o have just become a member of this forums thing(iknow i should be more computer litterate but im getting there slowly)

i was depressed at one stage too..but i didnt know it if that makes sense.i also felt like iwas fine around pple but when i was alone....i couldnt me alone.sleeping alone made me scared.and now being ramadhaan i have tried to change my bad habits and to learn alot moe about islam and i read salaah more regularly and i find that i am a happier person!that i can sit on my musallah and face Allah and beg him to forgive me...cos im not a saint as my nickname suggests.anywya my point is that i think if u sincerely sit and ask Allah to help you concentrate and to forgive the sins you hVE COMMITTED then that would help.

Posted By: herjihad
Date Posted: 19 October 2005 at 5:55am

Bismillah,

I agree with you ss.

-------------Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.

Posted By: Mishmish
Date Posted: 01 November 2005 at 4:09am

Assalamu Alaikum:

I am new on this forum, but I found the posts so interesting I had to reply to a few.

I too have gone through periods of highs and lows in my Islamic journey. That is natural as Imaan is always changing. But I always tell myself to be patient and I remember that Allah did not reveal the entire Quran to the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) at one time as it would have overwhelmed the Sahaba. They took 25 years to perfect Islam, and they were the best of us and in the company of the Prophet. I'm just a simple woman who was blessed enough to find Islam.

When I look at it this way, I don't feel so bad.

-------------It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, what is essential is invisible to the eye. (The Little Prince)