Goodbye Stanford

Goodbye Stanford

If the first day of 2016 is any indication of things to come, then we are headed down the right path for change.

At approximately 4:21 in the afternoon of December 31st 2015, my wife Jacy Franceschi walking under her own power stepped out of Stanford Hospitals E1 BMT wing a mere 30 hours after 2015 gave its final shot to our family with the loss of my father.

Take that 2015! That’s right suck on that! You can go to hell you rotten shitty damn year! You tried your best to take everything away from me, you tried your best to destroy our family! 2013 and 14 really had me weak and on the ropes but neither of you got us and you 2015, well you failed to finish the job! Oh you did your best to bring us down, but I’m not that easy and in the end it wasn’t even me that gave you the last middle finger for you see 2015, my wife was much tougher than us both!

Watching her smile as Heather our nurse disconnected the final IV line from her arm, seeing the light in her eyes grow brighter as each second grew closer to discharge. Packing all her belongings up, which after 6 months was an entire car load and then some. It was an amazing experience.

At 4:15 she put on her HEPA filtered mask, walked to the door of her room, looked around it one last time, took a deep breath and opened her door to freedom. Walking down the hallway she was greeted by the entire working staff. Applauding and cheering with homemade signs congratulating her it was more than she could take. Tears streamed down everyone’s eyes, hugs were had and the pure love from every person who ever made contact with my wife was more than evident.

To say we felt like family while housed in this unit is an understatement. Each person there is special. To be a nurse, nurse’s aide or doctor in that unit is to be a remarkable human being. Every day I walked through those doors to see my wife I felt at ease. Never in the entire 6 months, even when things were rocky did I feel as though I really had to worry. When Jacy was transferred to Intensive care these people fought to get her back where she belonged. There was never a moment where her needs were not met and as is my wife’s personality she made sure every single person within E1 who crossed her path knew just how much she appreciated them.

As we made our way out the door, Jacy cried. I am sure she was crying to finally be free, but I also know she was crying because she was leaving so many special people behind. It is what everyone wanted for her but there is an intimacy that comes from creating bonds with your caregivers and every now and again those bonds become stronger than just the patient caregiver relationship. If you are lucky that happens with one or two, but if you are really lucky it becomes the whole damn staff!

I cannot express adequately just how thankful I am to the entire staff at E1. I tried my best to hug each and every one who was there before we left. To everyone I hugged and to everyone I missed, I love you, you helped save my girl, you always treated myself and my children as though we were your family and for that I am forever grateful.

I never want to see you again!

Just kidding we are coming by to visit!

Jacy got into the car took a deep breath and as we drove away, she sat quietly. Parker asked her if it was weird sitting in a moving car after being in a hospital for so long and she said yes. The 30 minute ride to her dads was silent. I could tell she was taking it all in, and trying her best to not be nauseous.

We arrived at her dads and were met with hugs and happiness. Moving her belongings into the apartment it became official. We were finally on to stage two.

Her dad had completely repainted and redone the apartment just for Jacy. It is vibrant, comfortable and Jacy loves it! We spent the better part of the afternoon putting away her things and sorting her 23 medications that need to be taken three times a day. Uggh! Makes my stomach hurt just thinking about it! Within a few hours, people dwindled away, Jacy and I were alone for the first time in forever. We talked about the future, upcoming appointments and what it will take to care for her. She finally got a shower with no nurse, no lines, no hospital towels, and a nice soft warm bed to climb into afterwards. She was exhausted and ecstatic all at the same time.

Jacy Franceschi, my wife, my hero, the woman I love and adore, welcomed the New Year in by drifting off to sleep…..

Just the way it should have been….

2016 will bring some major new challenges to our family, but as it arrives and we travel through its first month I want each and every person who follows my blog, has helped my family or has been there for me to actually cry upon to know.

I do love you all and I don’t use that word lightly.

Whether it has been a kind word, uplifting passage, or deed done, I thank you. You are all part of my family. We couldn’t have done this without all of your support. We still have a long road ahead but it feels a little less bumpy and the directions a little easier to follow.

Dear James, I saw a link to your blog in a Facebook friend’s comment and started reading it the day your dad passed away. It is odd to write to someone you don’t know, but through your beautiful writing, I feel like I know you after all. I would like to express my condolences and I also want to express how happy it made me to read that your beautiful wife is on the road to healing. I wish you and your family a healthy and happy 2016 and that normalcy returns to your life. You are a very gifted writer.

This makes me so happy for you and your family!! I have been reading your posts and thinking about Jacy, you and your children. I continue to pray for all of you. What a wonderful way to start the new year!
I have to agree wholeheartedly about 2015. I have never been so happy to kiss a year goodbye! It was the year of my husbands diagnosis of AML, his transplant, my mother’s passing and a friend’s passing after a long battle with breast cancer. Here’s looking to a brighter 2016!! God Bless!

You, Jacy and your entire family are in our prayers. God Bless you all as you step into the New chapter of your lives. God put you in my life many years ago for such a time as this and I have been honored to be able to pray for you all throughout the years. God is Good All The Time.

Love the holding hand photo. You are amazingly strong. I pray that 2016 is a year of many, many blessings for you and your family.
We lost my mother in law in 2015 so putting the year to rest is good for us too. 2016 who knows what it has in store for any of us but…my prayers are for the good times to outweigh the rough. For strength to face the difficulties with faith. Prayers for many rejoicing moments awaiting us all. A new norm awaits your family, carry on as you have.
Your year started on a high the next week or so will be tough. You are far tougher, you are still standing and 2015 is done, flat on the ground and stomped on with your cowboy boots.
Hugs!! Debbie Duncan

Thank you so very much for sharing with us James in photos and with your words. Tears in the eyes, lump in the throat wonderful! I will continue to pray for Jacy, you and your family. You come to mind many times each day. The two of you are truly an inspiration for all of us. Thank you for sharing from your heart with all of us. Susan Joyce

I always received updates from your Dad and Mom……so glad to hear you are both moving forward ….

Yes, good ridence “2015”. It was some year ! Everyone I know had a rough year…I lost my mom to cancer in 2015….:( it did have its grand finale w/ the loss of your father…I am so sorry to hear your dad passed…..I lost so many friends this year. I have to say , I was not really expecting his passing. It blind sided me….

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I’m sure there are no words truly strong enough to describe your relief at finally making it to this stage in Jacy’s recovery, but thank you so much for this update & for all of your blog posts!! It means so much to all of us to be in the loop on all the highs & lows as we pray & pray everyday for a full recovery — and WHAT AN AMAZING HIGH THIS NEWS IS!!!!!!! HALLELUJAH!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

James, to all of us that 2015 was not nice to, I applaud your kiss off to the year. You are one blessed man my friend. I’m so sorry for the loss of your father. He holds a special place in my heart and always will. My Parents send their condolences as well. Be strong and keep loving your wife, you are her best medicine.

Your stories and your resilience have touched so many. Thank you for sharing such a tremendous struggle; it has been an opportunity to learn (or be reminded of) very important things like love, commitment, and triumph. We will keep you and your family in our prayers for the next year of healing. God bless you all.

Being confronted with adversity in your life is inevitable. Just keep in mind that it does not have to defeat you. Adversity is often short lived. Giving up is what makes it permanent. As a certified fitness professional, this blog is my way of helping you feel capable of anything.