FBI Celebrates the First Unofficial Political Corruption Raid Day

The only people celebrating this rogue, previously unknown holiday are FBI agents, but, with three raids on allegedly corrupt politicians across the country on Wednesday, it is possibly the hottest new holiday since Arbor Day.

Let's start with New York because New York is the most important place on earth, the center of the universe and the only place anything interesting happens. For instance, today FBI agents raided the Albany offices of Queens Democratic Assemblyman Bill Scarborough as part of an "ongoing investigation" into his activities. What indiscretions interest the FBI remain unclear, exactly, but the New York Daily News reports it possibly involves Scarborough's travel expenses.

What about the heartland, you ask? FBI agents did not leave it out of the fun! After a four-year investigation, the FBI arrested Charlotte Mayor Patrick Cannon on Wednesday for taking bribes from undercover officers. "Cannon... solicited and accepted cash bribes and other items of value from undercover FBI agents, who were posing as commercial real estate developers and investors who wanted to do business in Charlotte," according to the Charlotte Observer. He's also something of a local hero, despite only getting elected five months ago. Cannon was the city's longest serving politician. Now, it sounds like he was American Hustle'd.