Friday, February 25, 2011

Recently I heard from a blogger that had disappeared from the scene for sometime. This was someone I had linked to, but after noticing the page hadn’t been updated for some months, I eliminated it from list of ‘Goodies’ that you see to the right. Thankfully, the blogger has returned and I’m offering a hearty ‘welcome back.’

This writer’s resurfacing on the blogosphere has caused me to peruse my blogging list a bit. It saddens me to learn that quite a few of my virtual peers have either eliminated their blogs, or not updated in so long that they might as well. I won’t mention any names, but I will say that I miss reading about their issues, whether it be paying off a car note, living frugally, balancing a fitness routine with motherhood , adventures in France, blurbs about Battlestar Galactica or any juicy tales they might want to share. (If any of this sounds familiar, I might be talking about you!)

Now, it is not my intention to criticize or embarass anyone, especially since it’s well known that I go through periods of blogger malaise. There have been times when the last thing I wanted to do was blog. There have been times where I’ve considered shutting the blog down completely. But, here are a few things that keep me blogging:

-Growth. I like to look back on some of my experiences and be thankful that I survived. And alot of my issues weren't that serious anyway.

-Outlet. Writing is a good target for my rage. Whether I’m writing on the blog or elsewhere, it is one thing that keeps me from killing someone.

-Discipline. Yes, I’ve had my absences from the blogosphere a time or two. But I’m glad to have great blogging friends who send me firm reminders when I haven’t posted in awhile.

-Humor. I’ve always wondered if there are other people out there aside from my mother who think I’m funny. Now I know that there are at least two of you. =)

-Anonymity. Some of you know me, but for those who don’t, I like to imagine I’m shielded behind an iron curtain that allows me to say whatever I want. That’s what I’d like to think anyway.

And for my absentee bloggers, please read this article and know that you are not alone. But you should also know that S/C/W is out here missing you.

Photo from http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-pzr1iQI3NTg/TVWmhXMpM5I/AAAAAAAAAL4/4hPiYknUcc0/s1600/chicken_soup.jpg

Sunday, February 20, 2011

1. It's been so long since I've written a Sunday Spin I've nearly forgotten how to do it

2. If I remember correctly, the purpose is to summarize my happenings in seven brief bullet points

3. And now that I've thrown away two items, I guess now I can mention what a nice relaxing weekend I had

4. I didn't have to work my second job, so that was a plus. I had dinner and drinks with a good friend.

5. We went to a pizza parlor we'd never heard of before and while the pizza was DELICIOUS, we suspect the waitresses were also part of a brothel.

6. But Bambi gave us free wine and free dessert, so who was gonna argue with that?

7. In my efforts to get back into a regular blogging routine, I realize how many blogging heads have done away with their blogs and that makes me sad. Be prepared for me to call you out soon in an upcoming post!

Saturday, February 19, 2011

I appreciate all the rearranging you've done to my work area and giving me a new computer monitor. With all the cutbacks at the company, I'm glad you were able to fit my technical needs into your additional tasks of custodian/payroll supervisor/carpenter. When I saw you leveling that desk the other day, you were less than pleased when I told you about my blank computer screen. Nevertheless, I'm glad you got to it.

That being said, you should know that I keep a variety of items at my desk as a source of inspiration. That Method Man picture you saw, taped to the bottom of my screen? Yeah, I'mmma need that back. There is nothing like a gorgeous, thuggish man staring at me with those possessed eyes, silently encouraging me to represent Wu. Yes, I know he wouldn't want me in all my natural glory, but let me have my fantasy. I'll patiently await my picture to be returned.

Best,

Strength

(week 2)

Dear Dan The Computer Man:

First off, I want to apologize for interrupting you while you were plunging that toilet. Apparently, the unisex bathroom isn't enough for us anymore. And poor you, having to fill in for Craig n dem who rolled out on the company earlier this month. I mean, he could've at least left a uniform behind for you to wear. You look so out of place in your suit and tie, fiercely wielding a plunger.

So it breaks my heart to have to share another computer problem with you. I'm not able to retrieve pertinent documents from my hard drive. Now, I can understand the confusion. When you saw a document saved as 'FUCK YA'LL', you probably thought it was nonsense. Actually, that 12-page document is my letter of resignation. Whenever the Powers That Be give me unneeded stress, I whip out this treaty and add to it. When I leave this company, I want them to know each and every reason for my departure. At least count, I reached reason #274. Please locate my document so I can add reasons #275-#312. Yes, it's been that kind of week. I'll wait for you to work your magic.

Peace and blessings,

Strength

(week 3)

Hey Dan:

Fine, I'll stop calling you at home. But what else am I supposed to do when you don't return my emails or work IMs? I know I scared you when I was sitting at your desk yesterday morning, but desperate times call for desperate measures. If you hadn't called security on me, I would've explained this.

Anyway, my latest computer problem is with my music. In the nearly six years I've been here, I've taken the time to load inspirational music onto my computer. But ever since you did your extreme makeover, I can't find any of my old tunes. I'm a woman who needs to be fed with copious amounts of Eminem/Jay-Z/Me'shell N'degeoHoweverYouSpellIt/Amel Larrieux. And I'm talking DAILY. If I seemed especially aggressive, that was because I didn't get my dose of 'Dead Nigga Boulevard' or 'Way I Am' or 'Kill You.' These are my lullabyes. Once the security guards let me go, I hope to return to a musical computer.

Thanks,

Strength

(week 4)

Hi Dan:

Fine, leave if you want to. You should know that the rumor mill is blazing with tales of your departure. Did you really just erupt when you learned that my latest computer monitor had failed me, and you'd have to get me another one? Did you really storm out of the building shrieking 'FUCK YA'LL!!'? If so, that's copyright infringement, and I hope my check is in the mail.

You'll be happy to know that your replacement is handling my needs. Leo is not disturbed by my bobbleheads, or my Avenging Unicorns. He also has the same musical interests as me. Just the other night at karaoke, we entertained the audience with our duet of 'Renegade.' He did Jay-Z's verses, and I did Eminem's. It was a great time. But I do believe I scared the audience when I jumped up on the table and shrieked 'What did I do (huh)/I'm just a kid from the gutter/makin this butter off these bloodsuckers/cuz I'm a muh'fuckin RENEGADE.' I can't begin to emphasize the sexiness of a man who is strong enough to carry his drunken/deranged colleague off the table, yet gentle enough to hand her another beer and tell her to get back on that stage. I do believe I'm in love.

Anyway, it was great working with you Dan. I heard that a going away party is being planned. Expect Leo and I to be there, carrying microphones and a karaoke machine.