Wednesday, April 19, 2017

A Downside to Adding Up the Years

I vaguely remember the old
folks – my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles – sitting around the dining
room table, lingering over coffee and pie while discussing their aches and
pains, past and future doctor visits, and whispering when news was particularly
bad.

Fast forward a few decades
and the old folks are my friends and I. The scenario came to mind during a
breakfast at a local restaurant.

Every few weeks my yoga
class, composed mostly of retirees, gathers for breakfast. We walk into the restaurant, still stretching and
massaging sore muscles, sit around a table, a dozen or more of us, and order
coffee and fairly healthy food. I don’t think anyone wants to appear a glutton
and, for instance, order potatoes with their omelet–a side of sliced tomatoes will do. Work
hard in exercise class; cancel the benefits with a satisfying meal. My routine,
but most of my yoga friends have more motivation and willpower than I.

Conversation ensues.
“Getting up early, going to the gym, sometimes I just want to turn over and go
back to sleep. Not today. Looked forward to breakfast.”

“Me too, once in a while I
don’t make it. But the exercise helps ward off the evils of osteoporosis, or so
I’m told. Probably just another old wives tale.”

“You know what, if you don’t
come every week nothing much happens. On the other hand coming religiously will
not make you beautiful.”

“But not coming ever will
make me stiff and fatter, I know…”

A handful shun eggs due to high cholesterol concerns. The ordering initiates a discourse on how best to lower
cholesterol-foods to eat, foods to avoid, meds to try, meds to avoid…

The conversation over the
course of the morning encompasses a variety of topics, from good reads to bad
movies, current events and politics,
kids and grandkids, holiday plans and recent travels.

Health-related issues dominate
dialogue when setting a time for the next breakfast.

On the first date suggested the conversation proceeds
generally like this:

“I hate to admit it and it
took a long time to come to terms with this, but I have cataract surgery that
day, so can we get together another time?”

“Let me see…I can’t make it
either. Dentist. Need a cap.”

The next date proposed a couple of folks pipe up:

Outpatient surgery. Nothing
major…”

“Follow-up from hip
surgery.”

And on the third date, voices heard:

“Big day for me. Never
mentioned it before because it definitely means I am OLD, but a few months ago
got shingles. Mild case, but have to wait six months to get the vaccine. Marked
the momentous day in red on my calendar. But I can go after breakfast. It will
be a kind of celebration.”

“Hair appointment. Time to
color the gray–again.”

“Since we are on the
subject…any of you wear hearing aids? I know I need them but don’t want to
spend the money. I’ve heard mixed things about how much they really help.”

“By the way, can anyone suggest
special exercises for my arthritis?”

“I just started meds for
high blood pressure. Tried keeping it down with diet and exercise, but didn’t
work. Doctor said some people can’t fight genes, and aging.”

Meryl, your post reminded me of when I used to go off to lunch with my mom and her friends from the Senior Center. It was hilarious fun... as most had hearing problems and the conversation never made a lot of sense as people answered what they "thought" the conversation was about. Now mom and her friends are gone... and my time is here. Hope others get as much enjoyment from my conversation as I used to get from mom and her friends.

Of course we talk about our health or diminishing health, whatever the case may be. Isn't conversation made up of what is in our experience? I find it encouraging that you all are still going to yoga; you're still managing your health with exercise and diet. You're still socializing. You're still making plans for the future. We need to talk about how we manage our lives as we age. Ageing is not negotiable but what we do with it certainly is.

So true, we need a positive attitude. A 94-year-old woman in a class I take at a community center is always asked how she keeps going and stays healthy. Her reply, "I have to keep moving. If I stop moving people will think I'm dead."

Tapping the Source

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A Bit About Me

Once upon a time I worked for a financial firm in a strait-laced, crazy-in-its-own-way kind of world. I eventually quit and moved to the New Jersey shore.

Over the years I accumulated a wonderful husband, two sons, two daughters-in-law, five grandkids, assorted relatives and friends. Every summer they pack bathing suits and sunscreen and make their way to our door at the shore.

No one visits in winter, so I write...

about whatever I want - travels,

food-a favorite passion and pastime,

current events - whatever is happening in a life lived.

Thanks for stopping by and spending a few minutes of your time with me. I would love to hear from you.