Greetings my Libidinous Love Muffins, are you all ready for the Easter Bunny? Referring to the trial of the unfortunate Miss Ruby Tuesday, my Editor (the stud muffin Mr. Steve Nelson) and myself spent the better part of an afternoon witnessing the public humiliation of a poor woman who only wanted her day in court. Unfortunately my column is not the proper venue to discuss what transpired at the Ventura County Courthouse so this is just a quick update as a courtesy to some of my readers who requested a follow up to my previous story about Ruby.

[Ruby plead guilty to the charges of extortion and stalking in the case involving her and Las Vegas politician Jim Day. She was visibly upset when changing her plea to guilty. She will remain incarcerated until her sentencing on March 21, 2002. Her attorney's only words to us were "no comment", however the prosecuting attorney declined comment after a brief introduction. -Ed.]

This is Kid Vegas to you known Porn People. I have been quiet for too long. I am a Director, Producer, & of course a well known Star too. I will continue making great sex movies, with or without these young new chicks you have, because I have more, & I have people bringing them to me. I will use your chciks (sic), because they eventually meet me in person & see for themselves what a good person I am, not only that, they see the conections (sic) I have, & how much work I can get them, yeah, no agent fee, no money requested, I hook the ones I like up with tons of work. If any chcik (sic) is being discouraged in anyway for working for me, please call me, I will fix these jerk offís! (sic) I will give you an Award too, plus tons of work if you are hot. I try to help all talent in need, I am not a cowboy, I am not hardcore like Max (thatís a relief), I am to you talent WORK.. (sic) I am a major bridge, don't burn the bridge you have not seen, or met in person. We all know who will lose, oh, I have money to waste now, I don't use drugs anymore, so I can afford to throw out a little here & there, if you get what I am saying to you. Porn is my full-time job, I will not go away!

Wow! Itís a good thing he is not using drugs anymore! Can you imagine what this character would be like if he were high? Okay normally I would not pay too much attention to this emotionally deprived underachiever whose mama never paid him too much attention because she was too busy turning tricks. However, I did bother to visit his web site and it deserves my grudging admiration. To see more Kid Vegas go to www.generossextreme.com

And speaking of Moms, remember when your mom was always nagging you to eat your vegetables? Hereís why:

John (redacted)@yahoo.com>
Subject: how do they do it??????????
To: Antonia@AINews.com

Hello
All of us guys were wondering how those pornstar men are able to cum in such large quantities. The average guy ejaculates only a couple of teaspoons but these men on the screen seem to shoot buckets at a time. How do they do it? Are they taking some kind of supplements or doing a special exercise? Any information would be appreciated.
Thanks
Kyle

Antonia Responds:
My dear the answer is, Diet, Exercise, and a Healthy Lifestyle, but mostly they are just blessed with a Goddess Given Gift. Imagine how motivated little boys would be to eat right if instead of being reminded of the starving children in Africa, they were told they could grow up to be Porn Stars!

This next Horatio Alger has obviously never heard of Vivid:

Adam (redacted)@rollads.net wrote the following....

I am with a group looking to take some of the best performing Adult Businesses public. I am looking to find out where I can find financial information for said companies. Thank you for your time.

Adam Darling my broker is Dean Whitter and if you lean forward I will whisper his financial secrets into your sexy ear. Sh! Get closer. Can you see my cleavage? Okay now you are close enough. Psst!

Here is an email from someone who longs to be the Rhett Butler of Porn:

From: Scott (redacted)@hotmail.com
To: antonia@ainews.com

Hi Antonia,
First of all here I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your rapier, cutting edge sarcasm -- have it myself so can relate here haha.
(Duh Gee Thanks Dude!)
Not to be same song different verse but have a hopefully more targeted version of a common question -- I'm an college educated professional whose grown discontent with the stuffy corporate image and lifestyle, and would like to do something totally out of character here -- in essence I want to be able to lay on my deathbed with a funny lil' smirk on my face that folks won't be able to figure out *S* -- I would like to know where to look in the southeastern US for prospects to dabble in the adult film industry as male talent -- I realize its tough and most of the work is in The Valley, however any leads you can give would really be appreciated.
Thanks Again For Your Spitfire Prose
Scott J

Hey thank you for the complement, but frankly my dear I donít give a damn! Porn in the Peach State? What would Ted Turner say? I donít think so.

Okay gotta go and use my sharp tongue to sand down the paint on the walls of my office.

All materials constituting text, articles, press releases, stories, columns, photographs, graphics, and code on the AINews.com domain are protected by copyright, and either owned by Adult Industry News (AINews.com), or reproduced with permission from other copyright owners. It may be downloaded and printed for personal reference, but not otherwise copied, altered in any way, or transmitted to others, without the written permission of Adult Industry News (AINews.com).