Monday, December 19, 2011

Some TV spots for the upcoming John Carter movie have starting appearing. I like them well enough, though I still find the Tharks skinny and Dejah Thoris comparable. Despite that, it's still recognizably based on Burroughs's classic tale, which is more than anyone can say of any movie made about one of Robert E. Howard's stories (Pigeons from Hell being the exception).

I don't need the Green Martians to look like Lou Farigno, but they should really dwarf humans in mass and height. When I first heard Defoe was doing Tars voice, I thought it was perfect for a big brute. They don't look like brutes. I don't know what canon says, but I always assumed that Greens evolved from White Apes which are big and broad beasties.

If you read the text carefully (which I have in researching for Warriors of the Red Planet) - the Tharks are described as being quite skinny. And looking at the trailers you can see they have beefed up the Warhoons to increase contrast between the types of green men of Barsoom.

All of that will not matter much. It will be the story and characters that will either pull us in and make us believe the world, or fall flat.

The only person I know who has the body of a frank F. painting is Kim Kardashian, I'm not sure what people really expected from the Princess? Did you want a fat bottomed buxom princess of mars? The other option I hear here is super model, the third is some sort of aryian female ubermensch? She's a beautiful women get over it--does she need bedroom eyes and whisper like marilyn monroe? She's a queen, not some sexed up harlot.

Accent? Thomas Jefferson was from Virginia, do you think he sounded like Cletus P. Redneck? "get'r done mr. Adams!"

I would have wanted an actress with arresting and memorable looks, the kind of person who, when she appears onscreen, rivets your attention. (My example, though YMMV, is Catherine Zeta-Jones in Mask of Zorro.) This actress may do a fine job, but I'm not seeing that in her.

Accent? Thomas Jefferson was from Virginia, do you think he sounded like Cletus P. Redneck? "get'r done mr. Adams!"

Well, gee, no I didn't. I'm a Southerner myself and well aware of the various regional and class differences in accent. There is indeed a very distinctive "aristocratic Virginia" accent that would only have been stronger prior to the influence of television. For Carter, a Civil War era Virginian, to have no discernible Southern accent at all is ludicrous. They have either changed his backstory (which is very possible) or decided to thumb their nose at history by making an 1860's era son of the South sound like a flatfooted Midwesterner. It's exactly as ridiculous as having someone with a strong Australian accent playing Hercule Poirot.

Again, the promo is very noisy (even more so when I saw it in the theater) so he may have a Southern accent that I'm just not hearing. But I don't think so. Hollywood is notorious for stunts like that - The Vampire Diaries (which I'm sure no one here will admit to watching) is supposed to be set in Virginia and exactly zero characters have any kind of Southern accent. Not even the crooked sheriff! Why they didn't just set it in Illinois, I'll never know.

John Carter is being played by a Canadian underwear model named "Taylor Kitsch"? Ha ha ha that name is too perfect. It's like an SNL sketch. I guess I'll have to let the lack of a Southern accent slide, since he's Canadian and not Nathan Fillion.

There is indeed a very distinctive "aristocratic Virginia" accent that would only have been stronger prior to the influence of television. For Carter, a Civil War era Virginian, to have no discernible Southern accent at all is ludicrous.

I agree, but this is something I held out no hope of seeing transferred to the big screen. The John Carter of my mind speaks with an Old Virginian accent and his Southern-ness and service to the Confederacy are important parts of the man he is. I expect the movie to soft pedal both those things and I can live with it, even if it's not what I'd have done, given the chance.

I'd have preferred a harder looking Carter, less of an underwear model, but I'm not sure where you'd get that these days - 'combat veteran' and 'Hollywood actor' just don't overlap the way they did back in the day. And I wouldn't want Carter to be a steroidal WWE type.

Really, it does look pretty decent. Bit of a red tinge on the rocks would be nice though!

I'd have preferred a harder looking Carter, less of an underwear model, but I'm not sure where you'd get that these days - 'combat veteran' and 'Hollywood actor' just don't overlap the way they did back in the day. And I wouldn't want Carter to be a steroidal WWE type.

All very true. I can live with the actor they got for Carter (just as I can live with the actress they got for Dejah), but he's not even close to what I have in my mind when I think of the character.

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