Sunday, May 11, 2014

Dressing Down .. Sissy Avenged!

She definitely had it in her .. well, not the way they originally planned.

Wrote this one up about three weeks ago, and waited to see if I could improve upon it before posting. Other than changing a repetition of "mouth" to "gaping maw" I left it as it was. I really don't like repeating the same words over and over unless its part of a hypnosis caption, so when I saw it ending two consecutive sentences in a row, I made the change. It doesn't make the caption any better per se, but its something that can stick in my craw stylistically.

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I wrote this last night and didn't post it then because I thought I was being bitchy. I certainly was. Also, very opinionated but I think everyone knows me here and kind of expects that. Believe it or don't, I actually wrote stronger things that I had self edited I don't know many of the people's situations, sissy blogs I found through interacting with Kaaren, Leeanne, Sara and a few others. Perhaps they are all more fiction with a smidgen of reality. Maybe they are all 100 percent truth. I left what I had saved last night here because I was pretty passionate about it at the time and why not show what I had written, warts and all. My big "mistake" is that I really shouldn't be telling a domme and their subs what they should do, other than, real life actions have consequences that you can't wipe away with the roll of some dice. There aren't any 'take backs' or 'free spins'. Read at your own peril and don't say I didn't warn you. I certainly won't mind discussion. Never backed away from it before so if you think I was being a bitch when I wrote it, tell me! I don't mind, and I'd probably agree. I do hope thought that you do ponder what I've said before spouting off.

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So yeah, yet another blog exclusive and another caption I like to think presents a twist on the usual TG sissy caption. I think that everyone deserves respect, even when degradation is supposed to be on the menu. Its not supposed to be the sissy's place to stand up for themselves during playtime,
and bad form for them if they do, but its worse if they aren't getting proper support from the Mistress. There has to be boundaries, and if they aren't followed, then the Mistress has to step in and enforce the rules. If not, then the game is over, end of story.

And sissies, if there is something going on that you don't like, SPEAK UP! If she respects you and cares for you, she'll listen and make adjustments. Just because you are a sissy, you aren't a doormat. YOU are BOTH supposed to be getting pleasure from the arrangement. As a dominant person, I need to know the boundaries, and push them. I need to know where the line is drawn. If you just say, "well, she's my domme, she must know what's best for me!" or "if she's enjoying it, then I'll go along with it because I love her!" Its my job to be creative and cunning and resourceful, but guess what? Not everything I think up is going to be wonderful and fulfilling to you, or perhaps even to me. I would much rather do something we both love and can commit to fully, rather than have you go along for the ride because you feel that you have to capitulate. There are going to be compromises, but that is part of the give and take. Otherwise, you aren't my lover and partner, you are a sucker. Treating me like a god(dess) is one thing, but if you act like you aren't worth my time, and mean it, then why SHOULD I spend my time on you?

I realize that perhaps that read a bit harsher than I meant, but the main point is that you should have your say, and it should matter. I know more than a few people laugh when I say that subs in a relationship have power, but its true. You always have control until you let someone take it from you.

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Reading it through again, I think I did neuter it fairly well last night. Still, I welcome comments on both the caption, and also what I said, and possibly implied, in what I had written last night.

Pop songs in the 1970's had so much more back story and substance to them. I mostly remembered Sparks from their duet with Jane Wiedlin fro the Go-Go's. A much older guitarist got me into Sparks in the late 90's. Definitely an acquired taste, but I think of them as a pop music version of Frank Zappa and I do think that definition fits them snugly.

9 comments:

Dee, I have always believed what consenting adults do in private is their own business. If it Harm none... It always saddens me to see other people laying down the law and sticking their nose in places it shouldn't go. As long as it's consensual and does not involve minors, it's nobody elses damn business. Life's too short as it is. As long as its a role that someone is 'embracing', I'm good with it, even If I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. Should a sub have power, absolutely, ultimately they should be able to choose to stop if things get out of hand, then their real power is to endure, and not choose to Stop -- ultimate choice should be there's. Wow I don't believe I wrote this post, guess you struck a nerve.

First off, GREAT cap! Like many of your real gems, you take the expected routine and turn it completely on it’s ear in a loving and through provoking way. Bravo!

As for your post… wow. I think you’ve touched upon a very deep, convoluted, and complex subject. Let’s face it, there are infinite variations on what a Dom wants and needs as well as infinite variations on what a sub wants/needs. Just like a real relationship both have to be on the same wavelength to really mesh.

Another wrinkle to consider is how much time is spent in the Dom/sub realm. Is this a lifelong pairing where the Dom is always the Dom? Is this a weekend setup where both are playing rolls? Is this a ‘date’ type setup? All of them would have different ways to set up and move on from the situation you’ve laid out here. If it isn’t full time, then the sub always has the time to open up and let the Dom know what they are thinking. Two consenting adults talking about a scene they want to play or going over a scene that they just played has a lot of room for the sub to say what worked for them or not. If they’re honest with their Dom, then things will go smoother.

I think the real problem lies in the lifelong committed Dom/sub relationship. Yes, the sub should be open to speak their mind, but there should also be times and places where that’s allowed and encouraged. And let’s face it, no one just falls into a willing and committed Dom/sub relationship. It’s something that develops over time. One would hope that the sub’s feelings, limits, and desires have already been built into the relationship.

In any of these situations I can imagine both Doms and subs that would actually WANT that God/slave relationship. They key to that though, is to ensure that is exactly what both of them want. A Dom that wants to care for their sub probably wouldn’t enjoy being with a sub that honestly desires to be a doormat. The same works on the flip side, a sub that wants to be cared for and looked after wouldn’t enjoy being with a Dom that wants to be God and Lord over their sub.

I have a post lined up in the queue I wrote last night, knowing that I have many things to do on Monday after work. Its about 85 percent done, and I might finish it off at lunch today here at work and set it up to post tonight or it will go up on Tuesday.

I do plan on revisiting this, and responding to certain parts of peoples comments here. My question is, do you want me to reply HERE in the comments, or make it a new blog post? I would suggest replying to THIS comment as to which I should do, and just a regular comment if you wish to talk about the caption and/or discussion.

I am also glad to see that what I had to say has not overshadowed the caption itself. That was a big concern for me after I posted. Its been my goal in May to try to stretch within the captions I have been making (probably going back to the Eater Sunday caption) even when it limits production or promptness in returning trades.

I'd say the best bet is to continue this in a post. In line replying to comments is great, but if the conversation gets too big, it can be hard to keep up on when something new has been added, and what exactly they are replying to.

On the Domme/Sub/Humiliation thing. It's easy to get it wrong, but people normally get it more or less right if they're in a committed relationship.

Based on my experience, most submissive sissies crave the humiliation aspect of the whole thing, especially if their Dom brings in a 3rd party. It's actually pretty rare for there not to be at least some humiliation, when a female Dom brings in a male 3rd... Of course, common sense prevails. The 3rd has to assess the situation, taking their lead from how the Dom treats the sissy.

If the sissy enjoys being humiliated, it will be readily apparent from the way they are treated by their Dom.

In all Dom/Sub relationships, it's ultimately the sub that holds all of the power. They are the one that gets to say "stop" or "that's too far", and the Dom MUST comply. If they don't, it's not Dom/Sub, it's true slavery, and not erotic or sexy, just degrading.

This storyline/plotline would never even occur to me... Firstly, because as I mentioned above, a majority of sub/sissies crave humiliation, and secondly, because you'd have to be clueless fucktard to start heaping humiliation and abuse on someone you just met, without first finding out if that is what the sub or her Dom wants out of the evening's entertainment... Most people who would be open to a threesome with a Dom/Sissy in the first place would know better...

Dee-constructing Dee

Admin / Guardian Dee-mon at Rachel's Haven.
Fruit wrangler for Carmen Miranda.
Stealer of Rachel's shoes.
Affectionally known as "The Bat".
Lover of razor sharp wit and the absurd.
Commenter on many other TG blogs.
Connoisseur of Pop Culture.