The luxury sweet

The real race lies in who can give celebs the best free stuff

Around the same time that Oscar night became Oscar week, “gift” became a verb.

Swag bags and gifting suites offer the sublime and the ridiculous, ranging from life coaches (does an Oscar nominee really need one?) to custom-designed pearl necklaces that could serve as down payment on a house.

The swag granddaddy is none other than the Academy itself, which first offered gift baskets to thank its presenters back in 1988. Although the Academy’s collection may well be the most lavish of them all — the value of last year’s haul was north of $100,000 — the first rule of the Academy gift basket is you don’t talk about the Academy gift basket.

“It has become annoying to some people that we give out these baskets,” says Academy spokesman John Pavlik. “So we don’t talk about them.” (Basket organizer Sequoia Prods. Also takes a vow of silence.)

That stoicism is unthinkable for other organizers. Like Christmas, Oscar week is often less about giving and more about creating a marketing experience.

“We don’t do agents, publicists or celebrity assistants,” says Nathalie Dubois of the non-transferable invitations to her Diamond Lounge. “We gift everyone well, but they have to be there with their talent.”

In turn, celebrities know they’re expected to wear the loot in public and, if possible, sing its praises.

“They used to come in like a deer in headlights, but now most of them really get it,” says Britt Johnson, whose Mediaplacement creates a “Luxury Lounge” for award shows and festivals. “Brands always want to meet with talent and celebrities (and) celebrities know that wearing items on the red carpet is a huge coup for these companies.”

They also know that all swag is not the same.

“This is the first year that celebrity publicists have been asking me what the value of the goodie bag is,” says Edward Lozzi, publicist for the annual Night of 100 Stars Oscar-watching party at the Beverly Hills Hotel. “Some are being asked by their clients to find out so they can get the best bags.” (For the record: this one is worth about $10,000.)

Some might see it as a fair trade.

“When you pick up an Us Weekly, you see the stars with the product,” says Melissa Lemer, a partner in Silver Spoon Entertainment Marketing. “All of a sudden, everyone wants that gift. And the more you gift, the more you have a chance of getting in that picture.”

Some vendors even find instant gratification. Sue Gabriel, whose Carry a Tune turns CD cases and album sleeves into purses, found herself with overnight coverage on CBS News and USA Today after India.Arie walked onstage at MusiCares praising her James Taylor purse, fresh from the event’s Jewels and Pinstripes gift bag.

Samantha Haft, whose On 3 Prods. Creates the Independent Spirit Awards gift lounge, says a bag can take a year to assemble. “It’s narrowing down thousands of (gift) submissions to less than 100.”

“Gifting” is now taught at the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York. “It’s better not to have a goodie bag than to have a bad bag,” says Jane Ubell, who is preparing to teach a third semester in the Art of Creating Dynamic Event Goodie Bags. “There are many events where you come away with a magazine and a Tootsie Roll.”

However, one of the best ways to ensure celebrities will want what you’ve got is to promise some of it will go toward a good cause. “A lot of these lounges have a charity element built in,” says Jenna Seiden, a partner in swag-tracking site Swagtime.com. “Many celebrities won’t attend without one.”

To which single-moniker fashion commentator Jayneoni says: Oh, relax.

“Everyone knows that it’s not my way to take it so seriously,” says Jayneoni, whose Boom Boom Room at the Hilton will feature a display of couture Oscar gowns through history, stripper poles (“Vivica Fox told me, ‘I am there for the stripper pole!’ “) and — Charmin.

These suites bill themselves as a respite from the frenzy of Oscar week, but their sheer number is dizzying. Variety Weekend sifts through the lip plumpers and Swarovski crystals to find the goods worth taking. Note: Parties such as Elton John and the Night Before were not included.

Suite/Swag: Madison & Mulholland’s Ultimate Nominee bagValue: $75,000The Standout: $20,000 in plastic surgery from Dr. Faramarz DavidiAnd…: Expect an educated gift bag: Jane Ubell has made a cause of literacy and includes books in every M&M bagNo. Served: 30Charity: All bags are assembled by ARC, a job service for developmentally disabled adultsLocation: Delivered to celebrities and nominees in the week prior to the Oscars

Suite/Swag: Luxury LoungeValue: $7,800-$40,000 depending on who you areThe Standout: Tahitian pearls from Pearlparadise.com; Cosabella underwearAnd…: It pays to be Charlize Theron: PearlParadise created a necklace for her valued at $24,000 more than the pieces made for other best actress nomineesNo. Served: 75Charity: A gift basket is donated to Access Hollywood’s charity auctionLocation: Peninsula Hotel, March 2

Suite/Swag: Diamond LoungeValue: $30,000The Standout: Fileena coral jewelry and an $8,000 vacation package to Bora BoraAnd…: With vendors like Boucheron and Giorgio Visconti, this one has an international flairNo. Served: 150-175Charity: Donating two bags: one to the widow of an Iraq soldier and another to an injured veteran and his wifeLocation: Petersen Automotive Museum, March 3-4

Suite/Swag: House of FlauntValue: North of $30,000 (for the few who get diamond-studded sunglasses)The Standout: For the A-list: Emre Italian leather handbags and custom-tailored Hugo Boss suitsAnd…: Nightly entertainment includes Very Be Careful, Cut Chemist and Merle Jagger. If you don’t have a good time, it’s your fault.No. Served: 2,000 people over the weekCharity: Flaunt’s casino sponsor, Bodog.com, donates all bets to a different charity every night.Location: 2321 Castillian Dr., Feb. 28-March 4

Suite/Swag: EXTRA Awards LoungeValue: More than $12,000The Standout: One hour on XOJET’s Citation X, which can fly from L.A. to N.Y. in four hoursAnd…: Your dog will get Oscar-shaped biscuits from Chi-Chi CoutureNo. Served: 75Charity: Autographed gift bag to be auctioned online to benefit Race to Erase MSLocation: Le Meridien Hotel, March 1-2

Suite/Swag: SWAGG (Sustainability, Wellness and Green Gifts)Value: $5,000The Standout: A trip to Mexico’s eco-resort Loreto BayAnd…: Green with envy? The gift bags are only available to celebs taking Toyota and Lexus hybrids to the Acadamy Awards.No. Served: 20Charity: Each company that participates in the gift bag must donate “significantly” to Global GreenLocation: Presented inside the hybrid Oscar rides of their choice, March 5