Spoof news stories from Saturday 20 September 2008

Many people are wondering today as to who was actually filling the seats in the audience of the Labour conference, as no one with any sense would want to - that is unless they wanted to hurl obscenities at the so called politicians. This confusion wa...

New Yawk NY-- Sir Paul McCartney and Brian Wilson gave a joint press conference at Rocketfella Center to announce the reformation of 'The Beatles'.
The new group will be called 'The Silver Beatles', both to commemorate The Beatles original name a...

OSLO, NORWAY - The leading detective agency in Norway, The Norwegian Wood Detective Agency, is getting ready to break the story that Chinese olympic gold medal winners, He Kexin, and Jiang Yuyuan are not really 16 as they claim to be, but are in actu...

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - George Bush and John McCain revealed on Saturday that their $700 billion dollar banker bailout entails giving one billion dollars to each of the top 700 Wall Street bankers they know.
"Sure one billion dollars sounds like...

There was great excitement tonight, ahead of tomorrow's big match, when Manchester United travel to Stamford Bridge to take on Chelsea in the battle of last season's Premiership Top Two.
United haven't exactly impressed this season, and currently...

I recently had the distinct honor of having a one-on-one interview with Sarah Palin. I asked her about her infatuation with hunting. She replied, "You know, B.Z. ever since I was a little girl, I have just always preferred blasting defenseless animals whether they were moose, caribou, elk, cute little rabbits, harmless little squirrels, or innocent beavers, ah, let's make that woodchucks.
In f...

Pantomime goers are said to be tiring of the same old stories, of charming princes, no mortal danger, and a rousing happy ending where everyone is happy (except for Buttons, and everyone who is left behind while the lead characters go off to a life o...

Is there trouble in Brangelina land? Rumors have picked up pace that things are not quite as rosy as they seem with the Jolie-Pitt famille.
An unnamed source said: "With six kids, lack of sleep and privacy Brad has been feeling more and more li...

President Bush, self-appointed Leader of the World, has announced that all of the world's governments have come together in agreement with a plan that will solve both the energy crisis and global warming in the entire world.
Everyone is asked to r...

The hugely popular game of Monopoly has become unplayable after it became the latest victim of the global economic situation, this reporter has learned.
A spokesperson for Monopoly listed the various problems that have called a halt to the game:...

Following the heart-breaking news that the BBC has had to make some recent budget cuts, ITV has revealed that it no longer employs Badgers in its staff.
Mr Ian TV told us: 'We used to employ Badgers here. When they weren't working for us, they wer...

NASHVILLE - An assistant to country music legend Dolly Parton, 62, has reported that Ms. Dolly will be going on a 73-city tour with The Rolling Stones beginning in April of 2009.
Surprisingly Parton will not be singing or playing music, she will...

London - (Cover-up Mess): Serial children's story thief JK Rowling has given Prime Monster Gorgon Brown a £1m bung.
The backhander follows a lot of No 10 whinging about the credit crunch affecting the price of perverting the course of justice thes...

American teens were shocked when pictures were published of Selena Gomez and Joe Jonas. As everyone knows, Selena was dating Joe's younger brother, Nick. Nick invited her to his brother's birthday party and Selena and Joe immediately hit it off. Insi...

Dog shows have been described by The Royal Epic Society for the Prevention of Evil Cruelty Too (RESPECT) as promoting "unacceptably high levels of disability, deformity and disease" in breeds of pedigree dogs.
RESPECT has announced it will no longer be attending such shows in protest.
Chief veterginarian at RESPECT Brad Pit said: "Dog shows using current breed standards as the main judging...

BNP (British Nutcase Party) activists are due to rally in Stoke-on-Trent to protest the conviction and sentencing of an Asian man who killed a party member.
Habib White, (Asian / brown-skinned), was sentenced to 250 hours of community service and...

After almost a while as Prime Minister of the UK, Gordon Brown realised yesterday that he is leading the country.
Up to now, he thought Tony Blair was in charge, and didn't realise he was actually Prime Minister himself until just before dinner ye...

It started with a small thing and then grew into a complex ecosystem. No, it's not the universe, or the Earth. It's TheSpoof.com. Sometime in the distant past, um ... past 7 years, a lone writer wrote the first spoof on TheSpoof.com. That tiny spoof...

Nick Faldo, the European Ryder Cup captain, may have more on his plate than the US team this weekend at Valhalla, with one of his ex-wives Valerie Bercher claiming that "Nick is crap in bed".
Europe's Odin is in Valhalla with the team to try to re...

Washington, DC - With the full backing of the Fed -- that is the solvency of the nation's backbone: The American taxpayer -- AIG announced today that it changed its name to [Mr.] BIG. So to appeal to the latest report designed to continue to feed and...

The two children at once Bushes under the extreme influence of extremely procreative Sarah Palin and her impotent toadie husband Todd have passed regulations that will block the reproductive rights of women. No abortions, no sterilization, no contraception are the requirements are the lame duck Bush administration.
Bush's post menopausal momma Barbara told her ignorant son to keep his regula...

My perspective from the 60's conjures up a bunch of sewer rat Irish-German kids hunting the garbage cans of the back alleys for enough deposit bottles to finance enough fifty cent bleacher tickets for a gang of ten. On a really lucky day we scavenged surplus profits for five hot dogs and sodas to share.
But fed or starved the real good fortune came from sitting fifty feet away from Mr. Micke...

The dangers of cell phones have been rumored to be relete. Cancer of the ear, jaw and cheekmay be one of the mobile phones hazards. Car smash ups, train wrecks and soon to an airport near you, plane crashes all have been attributed or will be to the...

Day one - Dear Diary,
Ahhhrrrrrrg.Lets get started. Start writing to me what I sense you because I do not know how to write. Although this is my diary, I will not be able to read it when you are done writing it either. That's right, I am illiterate, duh! You ever meet an ape that wasn't? I have never had a need for literacy til now, so although I appreciate your help with this, you'll have t...