A little wisdom and a little humor found in everyday life as a wife and mother in rural Missouri.

You Said WHAT?

About this blog

By Susan Hillard

Iím Susan. Iíll be your guide on this adventure. As a married (since 1988) mother of three, Iíve accidentally found wisdom in the little, every day events of my life. And if not wisdom, at least Iíve found some laughs that I will share with you. I
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Iím Susan. Iíll be your guide on this adventure. As a married (since 1988) mother of three, Iíve accidentally found wisdom in the little, every day events of my life. And if not wisdom, at least Iíve found some laughs that I will share with you. I was born and raised on a farm and am now doing the same with my own children, Iíve found that each moment is a production of some sort. Drama. Adventure. Horror. Rarely a Chick Flick but always a Comedy. We are 4-H & FFA members, church-goers, sports-lovers and our hearts are faithful to agriculture and the good life it provides.
Our life may seem random to some but to us, randomness is on purpose. Routine is boring. My goal is to never be routine. These stories will entwine my experiences with my children, family and friends and general observations about human nature.

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By Susan Hillard

Feb. 4, 2013
6:54 p.m.

When I was ‘knee-high to a grasshopper’, I was thinking MAN! That’s one big ol’ grasshopper! But at the same time I was thinking that I was ‘finer that a frog’s hair’.
Who comes up with that stuff? I have no doubt some of these ‘wise’ men and women had ‘ants in his pants’ or a ‘bee in her bonnet’.
Frankly, I think children have a unique take on the world around them. I hope it’s all kids that do or that will mean that my kids are just plain odd!
My kids’ innocence has brought me many moments that put a bewildered look on my face and all I can say is “HUH?” which is followed by laughter once an interpreter translates.
Your child learning to read should be a proud moment in your life. Then there comes the monotone, steady rhythm of reading without pausing for punctuation that makes listening while fixing supper a mind-numbing task. One night, my oldest son Nate, was reading a story about something. Yes, I can admit it… I was not paying very good attention. Truth is, I was about to fall asleep. Then, it was like a record skipping and repeating the same thing over and over and over. My son was contemplating what a sentence actually meant. I welled up with pride. My son was gaining knowledge and not just reading the individual words! We were on our way…. or so I thought. The phrase was (imagine you are like me HEARING this and not reading it) “But where did it go? But where did it go? But where did it go?” Then Nate asked the question that crushed my feeling of pride in his contemplating…. “Mom! I think they made a mistake in this book. Shouldn’t it be underwear? Who says butt wear?”
And if you’re wondering….Yes I do many loads of “butt wear” in a week. This has become one of the many embarrassing stories that I, as a parent, is supposed to have and share as often as possible.
My kids also have an odd way of describing things. WARNING: the following content may not be appropriate for all audiences unless of course you can appreciate a child’s limited capacity of comparison material AND have a sense of humor. We all suffered from the dreaded flu several winters back. My two oldest kids were at the age where they no longer wanted Mommy going into the bathroom with them. But as a Mom, I asked if they still had diarrhea. We’re all human. We all know how explosive things can be. The description that follows changed my life forever. To protect the identity of the innocent I will not share which child said this, and this is the part that warrants the warning… “Well Mom, it’s not water poop anymore. It’s more like soft-serve ice cream.” Like I said, limited comparisons available!
My niece called my material scraps under my sewing table “crumbs”. We call the spatula we turn pancakes with a “flipper”. And my youngest son Colt, just a few days ago classified a muddy parking lost as a “chocolate milkshake” and he said he wouldn’t mind falling in it if was really chocolate.
I guess my point is that no matter how silly something may sound, it made perfect sense to the person who said it first. And just because your arsenal of references is hefty, it doesn’t mean that all share the same information. It’s all about appreciating another’s point of view.
Until next time… find YOUR Wisdom… Accidentally.