My 4-skin is no longer attached to the head of my dick because my GF wanked my banjo string off once while high on ecstacy. I thought the blood was hers.

Is that the kind of thing your teacher is looking for?

Also my work frequently has meetings and such where we have to introduce ourselves. Gah makes me want to jump out the window. Awkward isnt even the word. I'd love to be totally honest one time

"Hi there my name is ****. I dont like a single one of you and am only here to get paid. When i leave this shithole i generally slip into heavy denial because if i accpeted that i had to look at you c*nts every day i'd just blow my brains out. I enjoy gaming, playing bass and bizarre internet p0rnography. I value my dogs life far more than the rest of this room put together and often fantasise about going postal on you lot"

Pure Gold.

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from someone who allegedly lives in the same town (on another forum). 12 isn't really surprising when she allegedly had sex with a 50 year old man (lol, notsure if srs) as well as with "multiple men"- not to mention ppl have been saying she started having sex when she was 13.

Hey guys, one black person stole something from a McDonalds, didja hear? Forget the Civil Rights Movement everyone, I guess it was all just a sham. Ditto's single experience obviously outweighs everything else I ever knew about black people. And to think, I just wasted a whole four years of university studying about Martin Luther King Jr. and the like when I could have just gone up to Ditto and been like "hey man, so I know you're an expert on race relations working at a Mickey D's drive-thru, can you tell me some stuff about black people?" And he'd just be like "yeah totally, things at this one McDonalds were completely under control, i mean everything was as cool as an oreo mcflurry, until this black guy came in and starting jacking all these cheeseburgers, so really, that just confirms that black people steal stuff, ya know?" Sounds pretty legit. Maybe we can sort this out by instituting some sort of McPartheid to help our friend Ditto out.