AND ANOTHER THING...

Putting hurt on Reinsdorf

September 29, 2002|By Steve Rosenbloom.

A Steve-mailer named Jim Eberle came up with an idea that is devious, spiteful and conspiratorial, so, of course, I just had to share it with the class.

"Here is how to help the [White] Sox, in my opinion, and stick it to [Chairman Jerry] Reinsdorf at the same time," he writes. "I'm not sure if you have a vote in the MVP. If you do, great. If not, talk to all your buddies who do. Get them to vote for Frank Thomas, say, oh, about [No.] 5 if they go that far down in the ballot. If enough of your writer friends do that, Frank should finish in the top 10 of MVP voting, thereby preventing Reinsdorf from invoking the `diminished skills clause.'"

Eberle points out Thomas is pushing 100 RBIs in a down year, so he favors honoring the remaining $41 million over the next four years of Thomas' contract instead of allowing Reinsdorf to defer all but $250,000 annually, and besides, "Do we really think Chairman Reinsdorf is going to spend the money on a front-line pitcher?"

Hard to argue that point. Hard to argue this line in Eberle's Steve-mail too: "That is so sneaky I bet you wish you thought of it!"

Jim Eberle, your table is ready.

Thomas gets a standing ovation in his final home at-bat of the season and then gets mad at the media for it. Must be part of the Sox's annual Fan Depreciation Day.

The Sox closed their home season by winning 13 of their last 17 to retain their title as the Best Team When It Doesn't Matter.

The Sox are supposed to face the Giants next year. Jim Parque already has walked Barry Bonds twice.

You watch, those mouth-breathing Ligues who jumped Royals coach Tom Gamboa will find some lawyer who will sue the Sox for not having enough security measures to prevent them from doing something stupid.

Bruce Kimm said managing the Cubs is like "coaching football at Notre Dame." Yes. Well. Looks like we know who's playing the part of Bob Davie.

The Cubs need help in the bullpen--no, wait, they need a vaccine--and they will have kids at first base, second base, center field and maybe third and catcher next year. Oh yeah, manager too. So, here's the deal: No one handles kids and a pitching staff better than Felipe Alou. Look, if the Cubs are going to be Sammy's sycophants--and they are, believe me--then try getting a respected baseball man from Sosa's home country who also can refine Jim Hendry's minor-league ore.

The sun got in Leon Johnson's eyes and the dog ate John Shoop's homework.

All those injured defensive starters injured, coming off a loss, facing the hottest passer in the league--this is where Jerry Angelo wins a game as a general manager with the depth he supposedly brought in.

Angelo has signed 21 of the Bears' 22 projected starters through next season, except the guy who leads the team in sacks.

Carolina is 3-0, beating three teams that have combined for no victories. The teams the Bears have beaten are a combined 1-5.

Every team in the NFC North has allowed more points than it has scored.

Randy Moss obeys traffic rules only when he wants to.

Vikings tight end Byron Chamberlain said Moss is "one of the leaders of our team," and I'm wondering, when did the NFL start scheduling the guys from "Oz"?

Looks like the Vikings got the jump on that promotion for Visiting Day.

Moss and the Ligues--now there's a party.

Eric Daze goes down, and I'm thinking it would be a lot easier to replace the team's leading goal scorer if GM Mike Smith actually had been able to sign Tuomo Ruutu, the big Finnish winger he's always bragging about.

Here's what Daze did in the first 12 games last season, which is the length of time he's expected to miss this season: eight goals, six at even-strength, three on the road, one game-winning, one game-tying, 14 points and a plus-minus rating of plus-7 for a team that was five points from missing the playoffs.

The best player to fill the hole left by Daze will be Jocelyn Thibault.

Buccaneers defensive lineman Warren Sapp, on the block he delivered on Rams quarterback Kurt Warner during an interception return: "If you're standing on the tracks when the train comes, you get hit."