Check out the latest reason America is a scary-ass place - a Krispy Kreme Bacon Cheeseburger, which made its debut at the Wisconsin State Fair this summer!

The $5 monstrosity - created by Nathan Morrissey of Machine Head restaurant - apparently is a normal cheeseburger with a Krispy Kreme doughnut instead of a bun, and is topped with chocolate-covered bacon and clocks in at about 1,000 calories!

YUM! Can you imagine how quickly that shiz sinks to the bottom of your stomach?

A woman in Utah named Angie Cromar has an extremely rare condition called uterus didelphys, which essentially means that she has two uteruses, and somehow managed to get pregnant with two children - who are NOT twins - growing side by side in slightly different developmental stages!

She confirms:

“(The doctor) said I’m five weeks and four days in one, and six weeks and one day in the other.”

The 34-year-old, who is already a mother of two, is about one in five million with whom this happens!

Holy shiz! It's definitely something we've never heard of before!

Women who DO, however, have the condition, tend to miscarry or deliver prematurely, so we wish her a safe and healthy pregnancy…and then another one!

Hoooooly shit. We've seen a lot of exquisite, truly amazing mugshots, but this one takes the effing cake!

We wonder if that's the face that Lindsay Lohan sees when she over does it on the ambien and meth!

That stud muffin pictured above is Jesse Thornhill of Tulsa, who was arrested after allegedly sacrificing a goat and worshipping his dark master Satan attempting to run over his landlord in a '96 Ford Windstar after an argument!

He was charged with assault with a deadly weapon, and we're frightened to discover that he has been bonded out. Which means, all you fine folk in Tulsa, he's coming for you next!

We want to know where you go to get horns implanted into your head! Do people actually do that?!