Typical me… I told myself I wouldn’t think about work this vacation weekend since it has been so chaotic, but here I am on my computer on a Saturday morning when I should be sleeping in.

I met up with my good friend Erin, who lives here in Illinois. We became friends while working in the same restaurant and our love for helping people brought us even closer. While chit chatting about her job and how happy she is working as a social worker for the same school two years in a row, she proceeded to ask me what I wanted to do.

I always found those that get asked only question and can continue to spew for the next 30 minutes are passionate about that subject and with Erin’s question – I did exactly that! This is the summer where I am going to plan out my entire future of my career because I am tired of slowly going to school making me feel like my journey to the finish line is getting longer and longer. I want to see results NOW! While I continue to research to figure out my schooling plan, I thought I would share what I want to do since most people don’t know the actual details.

My dream job consists of sex education with a side of therapy.

Where it starts: I want to start young, teaching children about how their bodies are going to grow before they start feeling ashamed of their bodies and “no-no parts”. We aren’t talking sex at this age, just puberty and getting them familiar with their body before it starts to change. Making puberty something to look forward to – a celebratory act not something to fear and be ashamed of. My feeling is we as a society wait until we are too old to start talking about puberty and the changes that come with it. In this current age, children’s bodies are developing much earlier than they used to (think 9 & 10 years of age, not 16 &17) while their brains have not. Why not talk about wet dreams and breasts growing LONG before they actually do, so they are aware and no longer fearful.

Then there is the after puberty, before sex age. Were we talk about our bodies, learning how parts work and basically feeling comfortable all around. We would also work on respecting our bodies and respecting other people’s bodies, teaching about the STD/STI’s and how to prevent them. Teens are going to have sex – it’s inevitable. But if you can give them all the details beforehand and not make it a scary or bashful thing to talk about, they might think twice before doing it. The biggest problem with teens is, they don’t know much and most of the information they have learned was from another friend that didn’t know anything either. So they learn by experimenting – a.k.a. trial and error though sex. If we teach them everything there is to know about sex – the good and the bad, giving them the tools in order to make a more conscious decision, I think we can make a teen think before casually losing their virginity and possibly abstain from sex all together, if not – at least put a condom on.

This teaching will either come in the form of coming into schools as contract labor or by holding classes at a community center or standard location. I would also like to do a class for adults or parents to learn how to talk to their children about puberty or sex education on their own. How many times have you seen the stereotypical scene where the parents are absolutely terrified to talk about puberty or safe sex with their own child? If a grown adult is too afraid to talk to their children about these things, then how can we expect their children to be able to?

Then there is the therapy side. I figured that I wouldn’t be able to make a living off just the classes alone, so I would also work with adults with sex therapy on the side. This will mainly consist of couples that are having intimacy issues but it could be a wide range of things. Obviously that requires a Masters that will take me many years to accomplish.

I am hoping to get a certificate or something along those lines to be able to start my program sooner than later but time will only tell. After just two years of schooling, I am ready to get my theories out in the real world to find out if I’m correct and just the only one with guts to start so young. I understand with today’s society that we are more open to change – except when it comes to sex. We don’t talk about it, even with our own partner. It is considered taboo. But why are we ashamed of our own bodies?

I hope that I can get started sooner than later. Going back to my conversation with Erin, she told me story about one of her kids that I won’t repeat here because I am not sure what I can and can’t say, but the conversation reminds me of a quote from Kindergarten Cop “boys have penises, girls have vaginas”. While we all thought it was cute, we don’t realize how much we blush when we hear it. I want to put the kibosh on all those fears – where you can say penis in a restaurant just as easily as you say nose or mouth. I believe in time (LOTS of time and open minds) it can be done. A place where we feel comfortable with our bodies and no longer ashamed, no matter what religion is practiced or how old the child is. Knowledge is power so let’s start using it to our advantage instead of being afraid of it.

So much has happened in the past six weeks I just don’t know where to start! I guess we will start in chronological order.

I moved out of my parent’s house into my own apartment. I originally planned on buying a condo when I moved back to Colorado, but I didn’t find one that I liked AND could afford. Then I ended up with the bartending job which could barely pay the bills that I currently had but since I had never been to school before, I didn’t know how school was going to go and luckily that job allowed flexibility with my schedule.

In April, my brother moved back from Japan (he was working over there for the school year) and as much as I love my family, we are all old enough to know that we shouldn’t be living within the same home as adults. That would definitely be a FULL HOUSE! So, since I was unable to buy a place, I decided to rent. Oh… I love and hate shopping for an apartment. I am so particular when it comes to where I will be living. I have specific things that I need (my mother laughs at this all the time)

High ceilings

A big kitchen with lots of cabinets (I have so much kitchen stuff, let’s put it this way, I currently have 4 ovens in my kitchen…yep)

Windows that let in natural light

Space! At least 700 sq ft

That is pretty much for my needs. As for wants, it would be hard wood floors, not a 1970’s style kitchen, balcony and gas stove top are just an example. One of my BIGGEST rules is NEVER pay more than $1 per square foot! Well after looking for over a month, I think I got to point where I didn’t want to look any more. I settled on a place a little farther east of the city then I wanted, as I was looking for more of a neighborhood feel, but I fell in love with this…

A kitchen with enough cabinets! The island even has cabinets and I have filled every single one! There are things that I am not fond of but I think that come with every apartment. Unless you have the money, you have to be willing to compromise. And the thing you need to remember is that I can always move in a year, just like I used to do in the past. It is just nice to have my own space and independence that I haven’t had in almost 3 years when I first moved into my parent’s house to save money for a wedding. Dinner at my house? Yes!

I guess this brings me to my other recent change. In order to afford this new apartment, I also needed to get a new job…which I did! I found a fantastic job working as a Financial Aid Advisor for an online college. The job provides me with enough income plus benefits! I am truly lucky! It is something that I have never done before and it is my first job that is not food and beverage related but I think it will work perfectly with school. You see, it is challenging during the day to keep my mind stimulated…extreme multitasking. But when the day is over, it’s over. I can’t take this job home, mentally or physically! I have only been there one week but I really enjoy the people that I work with and looking forward to getting to know more about them in the future. I will miss my bar “family”, but whenever I feel that way, I can always go and visit them!

And the last change is I have completed my first year of college! I still can’t believe I did it. Now it seems like such a silly thing but I am proud of myself. I decided to take the summer off though to get settled into my job, but am looking forward to registering for the fall semester!

I think that brings everyone up to date for the most part. I still haven’t found a swimsuit (this one below I loved but it was discontinued) and have another two weeks left on my vegan diet.

On a similar note… I wanted to wish my good friend Luisa a big CONGRATULATIONS! She recently made a change in her life too (but I can’t say here because I don’t have her permission) and I am SO happy for her!

CONGRATULATIONS LUISA!!!!

So here it is 2010. So much has happened since the last time I actually blogged. And don’t worry, I would like to get back into the habit of posting much more than I used to. I will forewarn you that this post is long, so before you start to read, understand that it is going to be a lengthy one.

In July I moved back to the beautiful state of Colorado, away from the depressing gray skies of Chicago. Since then I have decided to go back to school full time. When I was 17, I attended college for about a semester and then never returned. Now 10 years later I am attending college as a 27 year old freshman.

While going to school doesn’t seem like an amazing feat for anyone, it is a giant step that I never thought I would be able to take. I spent too much time fearing school due to lack of money or social anxiety but now with a new found sense of self, I am able to start the long process of actually getting a degree in something that I want to do. I started in the field of psychology due to my natural ability to “life coach” and since then I have embarked on a new adventure within school. While I don’t know what I will end up doing in the end, as long as it has something to do with helping people and using my natural ability to solve people’s problems, I think I will enjoy myself.

My most recent struggle within myself is since I am going back to school, I have traded in my salaried job for a bartender position at a local pub in downtown Denver and now feel as though I am now living out my 19 year old life as a 27 year old.

I have to admit that it has been hard to let my ego go. I have been a salaried employee and usually a member of management since I can remember and now that I am working for tips and praying that you make enough money that night in order to pay the bills it is a totally different experience.

I remember a similar time, before I found a job in Illinois, were I was wondering where and if I could afford my next meal. At that time I had completely maxed out my credit cards and any money that I had in savings was going toward bills. It is kind of like that now, except that I bring in some money to pay the bills but never enough to get over the hump of actually being able to pay off the debt that I have accrued.

Which brings me to another dilemma; I am now living with my parents. If you remember, I moved in with my parents back in 2007 when I was originally supposed to get married. When I didn’t follow through with that, I moved into my cousin’s house in between the cornfields of Illinois. I have now been constantly living with someone for almost 3 years. While I am truly thankful I am also very sad that I haven’t had my own place to live for so many years. I originally intended to purchase a condo when I moved back to Denver, however my guaranteed source of income fell through. Now I have pigeon holed myself into living with my parents until I can find a balance of school and work. While I would love to find an administrative job somewhere I know that my brain would not be able to handle the stress of a computer job along with having to type multiple page papers for school.

I enjoy having a “peon” job, one where I am told what to do and never have a conflict arise or a problem to solve. I miss the mind stimulation part of having a more complicated job but I know that it is best for me right now.

I struggle with keeping the goal in mind. That even though I am not bringing in a ton of money, that I am surviving and when it comes down to it, it is all that matters. While I may not seem like an individual that has accomplished a lot, I know that the end result is going to be worth it. I am lucky to have friends and family in my life to keep me going. They continue to boast about how proud of me they are and remind me of the future.

I am sure that it will pass by quickly, but starting off as a freshman makes me feel like was late for the race and found the starting line about 8 years too late. While I will continue to find my way along the path the time will accumulate and at some point I will see the finish line in the distance.

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Wheeww… that’s a lot to get through! Since this is such a big one, I decided to break up my other “bringing you up to date” posts into smaller ones to save you some time. Those will be hitting the internet with in the next week so stay tuned!