(RIP) Bodacious The Shepherd Cat

I had to have Bodacious put to sleep late Friday afternoon, on 1 February, Imbolc, traditionally known as the first day of spring in Ireland. This day is more commonly known as Saint Bridget’s day.

These past 3 weeks, he had been under the weather. We had been to his vet several times. Bodacious even stayed over night on several occasions to receive intravenous antibiotics to combat a high white blood cell count from possible infection.

Bodacious’s Veterinary Visit

He seemed to have rallied and was headed towards recovery. When I took him for his check up Friday afternoon, I hoped we would have an all clear blood test with his seemingly good road to recovery. Everything on the surface looked fine. Bodacious was relatively chipper. He had enjoyed a great healthy and unusually posh diet of roast chicken with diced raw liver and heart. He demanded his egg whenever our refrigerator door opened.

Bodacious on the Aga during his final days in his Peaceable Kingdom

The vet questioned me about him. I said that Bodacious seemed to have improved and was eating well. But I was concerned about how his belly had swollen. He seemed better because his appetite had returned and he must be eating well and perhaps had gained weight. But I also explained how his tummy made an unusually loud grumbling sound when he lay down after a good meal.

As I held him the vet felt his abdomen and started to shake his head.

“Not good. Not good. This is not good news.”

He had felt a growth which had not been obvious before or was much less noticeable, when he had assessed Bodacious two weeks earlier. At that time he had taken bloods for analysis and also had prescribed stronger antibiotics when his high white blood cell count was discovered. All other tests had been normal for kidneys, liver, leukemia, feline aids, etc. Even his calcium was at a good level which is, I understand now, usually a flag for any possible cancerous tumor.

I helped hold Bodacious while the vet did an x-ray of his abdomen in hopes to distinguish the tumor mass. The vet couldn’t see the mass clearly but the x-ray did show a section of his intestine full of gas.

Bodacious Got X-Rayed

I was given 3 options.

1. Take him for second opinion to Dublin on Monday.
2. Agree to surgery to see if the extent of the tumor was operable, but if it was bad they would put him down on the surgery table.
3. Take him home and think about it.

I opted to ‘take him home and think about it’, as it was late Friday afternoon.

Just as I got home the vet phoned and asked asked me to bring him right back again. The vet practice group had met, reviewed his x-ray and thought maybe he had an obstruction in his intestines. They proposed to do an ultrasound on his belly and maybe surgery to remove said obstruction.

I recaught Bodacious who protested as I put him back in his hateful cat carry crate. Inca escaped as I went to the car so came with me.

I can never leave Inca locked in my car because she knows how to set off the car alarm. This wasn’t the moment for a noisy disruption. I tucked her into the front of my coat as I carried Bodacious in his cat crate back into the veterinary surgery.

As I entered the building I was met by four of the practice vets. We brought Bodacious into a room equipped with an ultrasound apparatus. As one vet and myself held Bodacious, Inca, still tucked inside my coat, trembled uncontrollably in her own fear of a potential sting of needle or humiliation of a thermometer stuck up her bum. I helped hold Bodacious as his belly was clipped of all his glorious hair. Two vets held Bodacious while two others took turns to press the ultrasound detector over his belly. Neither could say conclusively whether it was a tumor or a blockage.

I was given 3 options.

1. surgery – A Laparotomy to open him up see if they could do anything and fix things especially if there was a blockage.
2. surgery – If tumor is found see its extent. Then sew him up and bring him home for however a short a time he might have left.
3. surgery – find the tumor and if it’s inoperable put him to sleep while he was still pain free under the anesthetic.

I left him there for his immediate surgery.

Our Final Parting

As I headed out of the practice to drive the 15 minutes home, the car radio happened to be tuned to RTE Radio One. Ray Darcy was on the air. A group of musicians were in studio with him to sing.

As I swung out of the village onto the road home the young woman, Sibéal, started to sing “The Parting Glass”.

It was a most beautiful rendition of this song I had ever heard, maybe because I was in such a heightened state of emotion. I instinctively knew then as I listened to this song that I had left Bodacious alive but that would be the last time I would see him as such and that we were about to face the worst case scenario.

I realise this song was Bodacious parting gift to me. I wept as this stunning rendition of “The Parting Glass” was sung all the way home. It couldn’t have been a more beautifully timed tribute to our friendship.

I got home and started to feed sheep their evening meal when the vet phoned me. They had opened Bodacious belly on the surgery table and had discovered a massive tumor in his intestine at the junction of the large and small intestines. The tumor had almost completely closed his intestinal passage. He would have lasted at most no more than a few days. He would’ve suffered incredible abdominal pain before he died. So when I was asked if they could put him to sleep then and there for his own comfort, I could only say yes. And so it was the end of life of a most amazing cat. A cat I had the honour to have known and lived with for 12 years.

As I spoke with the vet on the phone I leaned against the laneway wall as overwhelming grief struck me. I just managed to breathe out enough to ask in a faint voice if the vet could please stitch him back up and place him curled up in his much hated carry box.

As I hung up the phone I collapsed against the wall and wept uncontrollably. I gave myself those few minutes to weep only as I knew I had to finish feeding sheep before going to retrieve his body. I knew I would never be able to finish evening jobs after I had picked his body up.

I phoned a close by friend who lives close by to drive me to the veterinary practice to retrieve his body. At this stage I was incapable of safely doing so.

Once home, his body still warm, I curled him up in one of his Zwartbles wool cat blankets and then placed him in one of the boxes I use to post my Zwartbles Travel rugs around the world.

With his box open I placed him on one of his favorite places, the corner of the Aga. I then put the kettle on to make a mug of tea laced with whiskey. My friend and I drank a parting glass to Bodacious.

Bodacious last rest on his favourite spot.

After my friend had left, I sat at the kitchen table and wrote an email to family and close friends to tell them of the days recent events. As I finished the letter all the dogs and I heard a loud scratching at the back door. It sounded like Bodacious’s traditional request to be let inside. Unusually all the dogs began to bark uproariously and raced for the door. I opened it to find no great handsome woolly cat with his usual polite, grateful meow at being let inside but only the essence of his ghost as the dogs roared off into the night.

The next day a grave was dug.

He had his last ride on the Quad.

Bear accompanies Bodacious on his final spin on the Quad. His last ride stops at his graveside

Ovenmitt stands by as I place Bodacious into his grave

Bear joins us

His grave gifts were:

Fresh spring flowers picked from our garden.

A Saint Bridget’s cross, as he had died on that day. I made it with fresh straw from the sheep’s bedding.

Fresh flowers and a Saint Bridget’s Cross

A nest made of Zwartbles wool in which lay 3 eggs with a few found chicken feathers.

His Favourite Food, 3 eggs

Two photographs, one of his beautiful all seeing eye, the other of him overseeing his flock of sheep from atop gate his post perch.

Two photographs

In attendance were Ovenmitt, Inca, Pepper, Bear, Bramble, The Big Fellow and my Sister and Brother-in-law.

Inca felt it might have been a waste of good eggs and nearly went in after them.

It was a beautiful day with bird song

In tribute to my feline friend:

Imbolc though it be, frost bones lie lacy in patterns reflective of still leafless winter trees.

Bodacious’ fire of life never left, just wained slightly with illness, his pain muffled by quiet enjoyment of companionship.

My heart breaks with the loss of my feline friend.

He walked by my side through wind, rain, sleet and snow.
He followed where no normal feline would dare to go.
He chose to walk with me across flooded muddy fields, through the Beast from the East’s deepest blizzard snow.

He kept me company as long nights lambing stretched into daybreak.
He would sit with me to watch the gloaming indigo sky turn into dawn, then day.
On hot days enjoyed a spin on the Quad, head lifted into the cooling breeze.

Life has gone from Bodacious, his strident demanding yowl no longer heard.

He is buried now where wild flowers grow.

He remains where each day’s rising sun first strikes to thaw the frozen wintery ground.

He rests forever on a hill top with views across fields, the river and to the distant Blackstair mountains beyond.

From his place of eternal rest he overlooks fields where his flock of Zwartbles sheep graze.

Every gate post has a Bodacious memory

The night of Bodacious’s death my niece had special permission to stay up past her bedtime to compose this most beautiful poem in tribute.

I cannot express how sad I am. There will never be another shepherd cat. Thank you for sharing the life of Bodacious with us and for sharing his death so we can mourn with you and celebrate his life. I cannot believe how much I will miss him….a cat I never met.

Dear Suzanna and all your family – human and animal and birds and trees on your farm – I am deeply sorry Bodacious has gone. This is possibly the most beautiful tribute and memorial I’ve ever read. Bodacious would love this and be honoured. He was a rare bold yet lovely cat and a brave wee shepherd. Sending loving thoughts to him at rest. And to everyone at your farm, my thoughts and heart remain with you over these days. Love from Canada.

Thank you for all this posting that I and others could share this heartbreaking news. I’ve been a dog and cat person my whole 81 years and can feel what you have been through. Cats so often are beyond help before they let us know something is wrong. Been through it more than once. Bodacious was part of my life and am so saddened with his passing. But I have his book and his memories. Hugs……Naomi

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend and companion Boadcious, a cat of inestimable character. I am in tears not only for Bodacious but for myself as my older cat Brontë has recently been through surgery & although recovering I can imagine how much I would miss my best friend, as you must miss yours xx

I am much sadder than I have any right to be, as I live in Chicago and never met Bodacious. I have tears rolling down my face: largely because he is gone, but also because you’ve expressed the events and your feelings so beautifully. My heart breaks for you. I just love the burial arrangements you made for him: I cried a little harder when I saw his lovely and meaningful grave gifts. Bodacious and his adventures have provided hours of distraction and stress relief from my urban life, and shown me a way of life I didn’t know existed. I have enjoyed reading and rereading his book, and am so glad to have it. I am sure Ovenmitt and Inca will prove their worth as they carry on. I do hope you and Inca will continue to share your lives with us. Sending love and hugs.

You gave Bodacious the wonderful sendoff he so richly deserved. He passed in his sleep without pain, and then that unquenchable spirit of his visited his favorite places before he came to rest in that beautiful spot with the symbols of his life around him. I never met him, yet I’ve followed his exploits with interest and pleasure, and I’ve cried at your account of the end of his life. So many condolences to you-I know you will miss him terribly. Remember, though, how much joy he brought to so many and to you. He was a one-of-a-kind cat!

My heart aches for you. I am so glad there is family Near to support you. You will miss him everywhere for a long time but he will be remembered more than any cat I have ever heard of by so many people. Take care Susanna. XXX Kate

I’m so sorry for your loss. I didn’t know Bodacious in life, but in his passing he is very vivid to me. I’m sorry that your connection with him had to end while you are apart, but I believe that you had the chance to give him a decent death and you took it, to your credit.

Oh, how my heart goes out to you! Bodacious was so very special, but oh how it hurts, it hurts when our furry family cross the Rainbow Bridge. I pray your memories will give you some comfort at this most sad time.

I am so sorry for your loss. There is no bond like the bond between a cat and his or her human. There is no love like the love shared between a cat and his human. These things are unique because they are pure and unconditional. As time goes by, the grief and pain will fade, but never really leave, because he took a piece of your heart when he passed and left a piece of his heart with you.

Discovering Bodacious and his wonderful family and farm has brought me so much joy. I mourn Bodacious as if he were my very own cat. Thank you Suzannna for sharing your beautiful, meaningful and very special spot in this world.

I am so very sorry to hear this news, and so very sorry for your loss. I am heartbroken for you and with you, though I never had the pleasure of meeting Bodacious. Thank you for sharing Bodacious with all of us – may you find comfort in the knowledge that there are many of us who mourn with you and for you. Keeping you and the rest of your feline & canine family in my thoughts and close to my heart.

I m heartbroken for you & with you… I am so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing Bodacious with us – may you find some comfort in knowing that you are not alone in your mourning. Bodacious was an amazing soul, and he was blessed to have been loved, cared for, and attended to by you. Keeping you and your family – feline & canine included – in my thoughts and close to my heart.

So sorry to mhear of the loss of your cat Bodacious. Over 20 years ago, I too had a grey tiger striped cat with the same name. He was a gift from a friend & our nickname for him was Face since he had such a cute face. I would also call him “Mi perro, since he was very doglike. He could fetch rubber bands, rolled up tea bags with a little catnip in them , came when you called him, & meowed when you said “Hi Face ” to him. He was a mighty hunter & he once even chased a German Shepherd down the street which was hilarious to watch. When I found out he was terminally ill, I cried a lot , knowing we had to put him down, but HE was the one who would sit next to me in kitty bread loaf position to comfort me. Naturally losing him was just devastating, but I believe he’s on the other side of the rainbow bridge, & I look forward to seeing him & all the other cats I have loved in the past as well as all my loved ones that have gone on to another realm. I will never forget my mighty dog, as I know you won’t forget your feline friend either.

I am crying here in my kitchen with my cats by me. So sorry to hear Bodacious passed . He gave me such pleasure and laughs every day . He was so special . Mind yourself. I love all the rest if the gang so surround yourself with them and their love. Maura xx

I am so saddened by this loss, and I was very moved by your tribute to him — particularly the line about “his pain muffled by quiet enjoyment of companionship.” I’ve no doubt the richness, warmth, and peace of his life on the farm sustained him at the end and gave him energy to continue on.

This must be heartbreaking for all of you. Bodacious was one amazing cat, who gave laughter and joy to everyone who knew him around the world. I’m so glad I got to know him online and through his book. RIP wondeful Bodacious.

Thank you for sharing his life and death. Bodacious always reminded me of my cat Tootsie who died several years ago. You never forget them they are with you always. You gave a beautiful tribute to him. It will never be the same bug the others will keep you going especially Inca. Look after yourself. Xxx

Bodacious – Beloved friend and companion. We give our hearts to our animals and our hearts break when they leave us. What happiness and companionship you had – a life of joy and pleasure for a very special cat, whose character has enriched many of your followers. ‘Tis a huge gap in your life. Be comforted by the memories. With love.

Suzanna, I send my deepest condolences to you and all your beautiful wonderful peaceable kingdom as you mourn the death of your most beloved cat shepherd Bodacious. I woke to the news this morning, for a moment not believing the words I had just read. Bodacious was so very special, unusual, bold and proud of his kingdom and his role. He will be missed beyond words. This was the most amazing tribute I have ever read, and I thank you for sharing his life and news of his passing with us. We all have lost a precious friend, and you will be in our hearts and prayers in the days ahead.
Rest in peace, Bodacious.

I will miss this boy! Reading the news early this morning in bed with my own boy purring against me as I cry. You honored him well. I’ll spend some extra time outside with my Oscar today in his memory.💙

I’m so sad to hear about the passing of Bodacious. I loved following your slices of life on Twitter and thank you for sharing his adventures with us to the very end. You gave him the best possible life a cat could have and I could think of no better or more moving sendoff. It is never easy to lose a friend like this, two legged or four. Sunny days to you and yours.

Your heart cat…I had a special one too…where I was he was, Mr Moodles..thought I’d die of grief, I still feel him jumping onto my bed at night & snuggling up…I hope they,re both together, no words will ease the grief, but in time this beautiful Tribute will bring you comfort….so lovely, thinking of you at this heartbreaking time xxxx

Dear Suzanna,
My heart breaks for you. The most difficult thing we face in life is grief. Your words, your tribute to your loyal friend and the beautiful memorial only deepen my understanding of your incredible bond you share(intentional:it will always remain in the present tense) with Bodacious. May God grant you strength at this time.Thank you for sharing this special being with us. Love to you and all the members of your peaceable kingdom.

I never knew Bodacious before today. Just happened to be on Twitter and followed the link. I, too, am weeping, sitting here at my desk in the office. A beautiful love story, and a beautiful family of fauna.

Oh Dear Bodacious how much you will be missed. Thank you so very much for sharing your life on the farm with us all these years. I was always happy to see when you had posted a message, or one of your beautiful pictures, giving me a glimpse into your wonderful farm life; an inspiration from a life well worth living. Thank you Susanna for taking us along with his last days here, for his kind and thoughtful grave gifts, and his beautiful resting place. I can only imagine how much you feel the loss ( I cry when I see the pictures above and think of him having left this world, and I’ve never met him). Greetings and Love, Roland Bol (shepherd cat twitter follower of several years)

A beautiful obituary for a truly special puss. He was a gift from heaven, and that makes parting with him all the more difficult. It was fate that you would both come together in Kilkenny that day. Take comfort from the fact tbat you were his his special person whose company he chose above everyone else even through the worst of the weather! He is now forever in good weather & reunited with Oscar. A big hug to you now & for the days ahead xxx

I’m so very sorry to hear you have lost such a splendid and magnificent companion. I’ve loved seeing his life of work and pleasure unfold and I’ll miss his beautiful face. My deepest sympathy is with you and your extended amazing family. Your tribute to him was very moving – he was unique. I’m certain he will rest well indeed.

“When our body is no longer able to perform its functions in the natural world but is separated from our spirit, which is called dying, we still continue to be ourselves and to live. We ourselves live, because we live not from the body but from the spirit, since it is the spirit which thinks and loves in us, and thought with affection makes us what we are.

Remember, friends, that everyone is born for heaven; and that they are received into heaven who receive heaven in themselves while in this world.”

“When our body is no longer able to perform its functions in the natural world but is separated from our spirit, which is called dying, we still continue to be ourselves and to live. We ourselves live, because we live not from the body but from the spirit, since it is the spirit which thinks and loves in us, and thought with affection makes us what we are.

Remember, friends, that everyone is born for heaven; and that they are received into heaven who receive heaven in themselves while in this world.”

We are strangers, but I follow you on Twitter (which I only view infrequently). I have only just seen this news of Bodacious, and just wanted to offer you my absolutely heartfelt condolences and (respectfully), on behalf of Bodacious, what I feel sure would be heartfelt gratitude for the honour of such a beautiful farewell. What a wonderful Being he was. He lives on in people’s Hearts. Namaste 🤗

I’m crying from the beautiful tribute you’ve given to this amazing cat. I feel your pain, as I mourn my lost friends as well, and have lost several recently. May you get comfort knowing that this fantastic cat was so happy in his life with you, and free in a way most cats do not get to have. You inspire me with your posts. Please keep doing it!

Such a beautiful and unique cat, Bodacious was. Thank you for letting those of us who are so far away share in knowing him online, and seeing the beauty of your surroundings and your lovely farewell tributes for Bodacious. I will certainly remember & think of you all. <3

Dear Suzanna,
I read this some days ago but wasn’t capable of commenting as this saddened me so much. It’s such a beautiful tribute. I’m so sad this beautiful cat had to go, but happy he had such an amazing life thanks to you. If this is hard for me, a stranger, I can not imagine how heartbreaking it must be for you. I wish you strength and light. Thank you for introducing us to this extraordinary cat. Blessings from Switzerland.

Only found out the sad news yesterday. Dear Bodacious, your book is by my bed. I did want to meet you but I will have to make do with your book and watching the videos. Maybe I will meet you in another life. RIP xxxxx