Jean Claude Van Damme Has An Awesomely Stupid Idea For How He Can Be In ‘The Expendables 4’

If you haven’t seen The Expendables 2 by now, I’m not going to worry about upsetting you with spoilers, because it came out two years ago, and the presumably more awesome The Expendables 3 hits theaters this summer. So if you haven’t even seen 2 yet, how the hell do you expect to follow the intricate plot details of the third installment? That said, we all know that Jean Claude Van Damme’s villain, Jean Vilain*, dies in a spectacular battle with Sylvester Stallone’s Barney Ross at the end of The Expendables 2, and that’s obviously why he’s not in the third one.

However, Van Damme has a pretty interesting idea as to how he could once again take on Ross and the Expendables in The Expendables 4, if it happens, and it’s an idea that is so stupid and hilarious that it can only be better if you imagine that it took him more than a year to come up with it. According to the website Expendables Premiere, Vilain’s twin brother, Claude, would come seeking revenge.

Dear Trevor and the Expendables Premiere fans, I had a great time shooting The Expendables 2 with Mr. Stallone and other big action stars.

Mr. Stallone is an inventive man. He may even create a stronger character than Claude Vilain, the twin brother of Jean Vilain.

Some fans ask me if the next Vilain –if there’s next– is going to be a good or a bad guy.

I would leave it to Mr. Stallone to decide, as I trust his way of imagination. Thank you,

JCVD

So maybe he won’t be seeking revenge. Maybe he’ll be the good twin, the yin to Jean’s yang, so to speak, and he’ll join the Expendables to take down their greatest foe yet. But for the sake of the plot, I’d suggest that Claude would not only have to be a bad guy, hellbent on seeking blood for the death of his brother, but he’d also have to be a cyborg. The Expendables franchise, if anything, is about the evolution of storytelling, so I just want to make sure that Stallone stays true to his roots.

*It still blows me away that the name of the main villain, played by Jean Claude Van Damme, was Jean Vilain. It’s like they meant to write “Jean Villain,” but misspelled villain and eventually forgot to update the script. I love these movies so hard.

Well he’s played twins in a movie before, ala “Double Impact” and this time it would be even easier since there would only be one. He wouldn’t even have to change clothes or stand in front of mirrors or anything. GENIUS.

Burnsy, the moment I read the headline I thought “Cyborg”. That would essentially switch the genre of these films to sci-fi/action, thus propelling them into the next logical progression of this silliness…THAT I WILL PAY ALL OF THE MONIES TO WATCH.

Obviously the twin needs to have amnesia, he doesn’t know if he is a good guy or a bad guy. Then during his journey of self discovery discovers that his dad was a a sailor who knocked up his whore mother and that the sailor is Ross’ dad meaning he killed his own half brother.
Jesus JCVD, is your tropeometer busted, if you wanna go stupid, go big stupid.

The fact that he had maybe 10 minutes of screentime as the bad guy still irritates me. Such a wasted opportunity. The fact that he wants to return proves that even he feels he got the shaft in that film.

How has no one mentioned that this would be a perfect Universal Soldier crossover? Jean Vilain’s body is found by some evil black-ops types, probably Illuminati (Jay-Z), reanimated into the perfect soldier, and sent to task on the Expendables, while Dolph Lundgren has trouble discerning whether flashbacks he’s having to being one of the aforementioned soldiers is real, or acid come back to do him wrong.

I don’t have the link to back this up but I’m pretty sure I heard on a british radio interview when Expendables 2 came out that Stallone had named JCVD’s character Vilain after Paul Verlaine as a call back to people telling him (Rambo) who Arthur Rimbaud was. This way the showdown fight became Verlaine versus Rimbaud, a french poetry smackdown, and the film critic from the radio show was very pleased to have spotted it.