AT&T drew particular criticism, with Legere — like so many others before him — labeling Ma Bell’s network as “crap” in New York City. Verizon didn’t come out unscathed either, with Legere joking, “the way they covered those dust bowl states with LTE I think is admirable.” Shared data plans also came under fire. “A 5-gigabyte, 10-device shared data plan, when Joe Schmoe Jr. starts to watch porn on his phone, isn’t gonna work.” And even after crediting Verizon’s network as “beautiful,” he concluded “they’re not the cool company.”

That’s great. I’ll be more impressed when T-Mobile’s coverage in my area isn’t spotty as hell.

It’s hard to not picture the CEOs of all three of these companies laughing over an expensive meal, taking turns to step out of the room to trash each other to the press, then going back inside to have another laugh.