A blog about a not so perfect me. My love and walk with God, prayer, food, nutrition, being bi-polar and day to day life is what you will find here.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Monday
Fast day. Beginning of the week. Time to put my thoughts together about what I want for this week.
I want more me time, to spend with God.
I want to read the bible more. So, today I am going to dig out my 365 day bible, and even though its July, I must not let that put me off because part of me says you have to start it from the beginning first.
I want to pray more.

Today I ask that the words of my mouth and the mediations of my heart, be pleasing to you oh Lord, my rock and my redeemer.( ps. 19.14)
I ask that my eye's be continually drawn to You today and not to the rumbles of my tummy.

Looking back at my journal I notice that one of my recent Monday prayers( 20 June) is: Teach me how to speak kindly to my family. I have noticed that I have a harsh tone with them when I am displeased.
I can see a difference. I am quicker to change my tone when I catch myself talking this way with my kids. I still have a long way to go with my husband. As we both work together, a lot of my grumbling is over work, and the way I talk makes it seem if its his fault. Apparently I also pull my mouth. I am grateful that he is pointing it out, even though "in the moment" I am not. Its not easy to change a habit. Richard Foster (celebration of discipline) says the purpose of prayer is to be continually transformed into the image of God. I love that saying. For me its comforting to know that its a process.

One of the aims of my Monday fast is to pray for our business. This is an area that we should all continually bathing with the Holy Spirit, especially in these economic times. Its a struggle to hand it over to the Lord as its an area that is very much about me. How hard I work, What I am trying to do and succeed. I, I, I.I hold tightly onto it, and thus hold onto all the worries that go with being self employed.
God says we are to" cast your burdens onto Him, and He will sustain you". ( ps 55.22)

Lyrics Sally De Ford Church Music Contest: Anthem division--Award of Distinction 2005 (version with organ).Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will make it lightCome unto him, ye heavy laden; find your rest in ChristBring him your sorrows, all your griefLay every weakness at his feetHe will sustain you, give you peaceAnd lead you into lifeCast your burden on the Lord and he will heal your soulPlace on his altar all your sin and he will bear its tollBring him your blindness born of prideGive him your broken heart to bindIt was for this he bled and died:That he might make you wholeCast your burden on the Lord and he will carry you homeHe will attend you and defend through perils yet unknownPut your unwavering trust in himChrist, your constant heavenly friendHas graven you in the palms of his handsAnd never forsakes his own