Cheap Vodka for pre-game - $10
Admission to TKE Party - $5
Getting Cock-Blocked by Carl Krauser... Priceless
There are some things money can't buy, but for everything else (like like a megaphone to scream "fuck you" at the captain of the #9 basketball team in the country after he piss's off the roomate of the chick who's taking you home) there's debit mastercard... accepted at colleges around the country.

Life is like a midget pissing in a urinal, your always on your toes.
"As christians, we don't believe in jinxes, hoedowns, or yetis. And don't forget gettysburg."
"soak your ipod in bleach and then dip it in raspberry jam and it will be XP compatible." - Bons