My partner Grace and I, on a recent beach stroll, passed a friend who was holding hands with his teen age nephew. We were warmed by the sight and we both commented that many men are making positive changes in Australia. Later we noticed a number of proud dads pushing a stroller and a few others with a baby in a carry sling.

These male behaviours, long established in certain European countries, are indicative of Aussi blokes becoming more nurturant and involved with their children. More and more men are embracing the consciousness of partnership and shifting away from the old “power-over” or “dominator” method of structuring society.

Some of us may find those actions threatening in some ways. Sadly we have been programmed to be more comfortable with pictures of men fighting than holding hands. One thing is for sure – with humanity’s enormous military and industrial powers, the planet will not be saved by more of the old warrior mentality.

Today many prominent sports stars are also modelling healthier forms of masculinity and they provide some balance to the bad role modelling of men like Carey, Warne, Cousins, Henjak and D’Arcy, who, did not have a solid healthy masculine core to draw upon.

Kris Massie, from the AFL club the Adelaide Crows, is one young man working to improve himself and use his sport to model healthy and sustainable forms of masculinity. Kriss was featured in my book “Kicking a Goal for Masculinity” where he talks about the influence of good masculinity role models within the AFL

I’m proud of all the men who are doing the hard work to improve themselves – I know for myself I had to expose many shadows lurking in the hidden corners of my being. I know it takes big heart muscle to look at the unsavoury parts of ourselves without resorting to drugs, sexual addiction, alcohol, or other “soothers” as a bandaid or crutch for the pain we must face.

I’ve long said that big heart muscle, big heart courage, big heart integrity are the most important qualities for men to build and are the basis of emotional fitness – the fitness that can make or break our lives.

After all, how can we save the planet if our leaders do not have those qualities and how will we recognise them if we don’t have them in ourselves?

Please write and tell me if you have some stories of men courageously striving to become more conscious and I’ll feature them on my website.