(click ad) It is inane beyond my comprehension: what a stupid, insulting cliche. Do you dying medium idiots actually think that's going sell any newspapers? And what's with that lame, outdated illustration style? The copy ain't much better (sorry for the low resolution scan). Last line: "Because a little depth looks great on you." Just a little, you ill-informed dumbass Americans. Said Donna Barrett, NAA board member, about the new campaign which is being tested in eight markets:
"Literally, everyone at the agency, everyone on our committee, and then everyone on the board had a 100-percent positive reaction to that headline. It sets a fun new tone for [the industry]. Who doesn’t want to be perceived as both smart and sexy? And if you can tie the two together? All the better!”
Jesus Christ, get a new agency. Ad agency: The Martin Agency, Virginia.
Newspapers: forever terrible at advertising themselves.Related: Magazines: forever terrible at advertising themselves.

(click pics, via) Look at how cute that skeevy public masturbator used to be! Who could imagine, 35 years later, he'd be getting his penis licked in an American Apparel ad? Or holding a dildo in a fake street poster? Or running a successful retail business straight off a cliff? Though, that leisure suit does portend future pervy proclivities. Photos taken in the 70s by his father, Morris.

(click ad, via) I've previously seen this ad on a phone kiosk on the Upper West Side, but didn't have a camera on me. This was snapped in Halethorpe, Maryland. Yay or Nay? I will say I bet the penman/woman of this IN YOUR FACE line is as proud as an asshole peacock. Previously in: The Copywriting Hall of Fame.

(click ads, via) Last week, the California Milk Processor Board pulled their laughably sexist campaign, a campaign the antiquated Jeff Goodby of ad agency Goodby Silverstein & Partners said "served its purpose." (Which, I guess, was to insult most every woman and man who saw it?)
Well, now Mercy For Animals is "borrowing" Goodby's slick art direction for a new Got Ethics? anti-milk print campaign that they say will launch in an upcoming issue of Ms. Magazine. Here's the website. Warning: graphic video auto-plays.

(click image) A fake Weiner billboard, anyway. Otherwise, many people would've snapped it and posted it, but this is the only place online I found it. Whaddya expect from a scam dating site for cheaters? Thanks to Stacy for the tip. Previous real Ashley Madison billboards: London • Los Angeles.

(click ad) My goodness, I haven't posted a condom ad since June 20th! This one for Pronto condoms is not new, but I hadn't seen it before. The selling point is that its package is an applicator, enabling you to sheath your schlong swiftly. Here's video of how it works. The ad? Enough with the cock as cock visuals. Country: South Africa. Ad agency: unknown. Via. Previously: follow the links in this Durex chocolate-flavored prophylactic ad featuring Monica Lewinsky to see about 50 more condom ads.

Monday, July 25, 2011

(click images) From the press note of the Surfrider Foundation (started by surfers in 1990 to protect the ocean and its coastlines):
"Last year's oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico left a deep impression in people's minds. To remember this catastrophe, we have a created a calendar with photos of young naiads covered in oil...This calendar, which will be offered to all members of Surfrider Foundation Europe, is also designed to help recruit new volunteers..."
I call (partial) Photoshop! Also, slimy insensitivity! All male creative team! What a surprise! Ad agency: Y&R Paris. See the rest of the calendar here.Previous uncomfortable girlie calendars:
• The coffin cuties of Italy (nsfw).
• The Matchbox Barbie calendar.
• and the X-ray nudie skeleton calendar.related: nine nudie Russian business calendars (nsfw).

(click images) You, being a Web visitor, have of course seen these faces, and many more, in the last year or so. It used to be stupid dancing people, and these scumbags used to spend $75 million a year to make sure you and everybody else on the Internet saw their ads every goddamn day. I don't know their current ad budget, but their creepy ads are still quite ubiquitous.Related: the hilariously tactless AccuQuote life insurance ads.

Doggystyle the Rainbow. Consummate the Rainbow. Peter North the Rainbow. As you can see by their locked title, this is a Skittles parody directed by the L.A. team "Cousins." So, that happened. Wrigley has probably already fired off a C&D letter. No? Well, it's coming, I'm sure. After three days, the video has over 400,000 views on YouTube. Go here and here to view the real, insane Skittles commercials.
Thanks to both JC and Ryan for the tip.