Yum Yum – canned uranium ore!

The really funny thing about this can of uranium ore webpage is the associated comments, for example...

Do you remember way back in the mists of time when I wrote a blog about a Radiation Dose Chart? Following this, I built myself a DIY Geiger Counter … but my Little Beauty didn’t count.

I didn’t know whether this was simply due to the fact that I didn’t have a source of radiation, so I sent it off to my friend David Ashton in Australia.

Almost as soon as I'd dropped my Geiger Counter in the post, Nick Bricteux sent two radioactive marbles to me, thereby allowing me to proclaim in all honesty that I am the proud possessor of a pair of Radioactive Balls.

Happily, Davis sorted out the problem, and he even wrote a column about it called How to make a Geiger counter count. And as soon as the little rascal was back in my hands (the Geiger counter, not David), I took a video of it clicking away in my office.

But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about…

A few days ago, a reader emailed me with a link to a can of uranium ore that you can purchase from Amazon.com. Give me strength! They really do sell just about everything these days, don’t they?

One funny thing about all of this is the section that says "Customers who viewed this item also viewed…" Would you care to make a guess? Well, how about:

Actually, all joking apart, I think I have sufficient Wolf's Urine on hand to satisfy my current and foreseeable requirements, and the canned unicorn is rather tasty (or so I've been told). But the really funny thing about the can of uranium ore page is the comments, for example:

Example #1:Ran out of toothpaste, and remembered how you're supposed to be able to use baking soda to clean your teeth, so of course, I accidentally used this instead, and Wow! all I can say is, my teeth have never been cleaner! They sparkle, they tingle, and for some reason, they STAY clean now, no matter what.

Example #2: Is this U-235 or U-238 I need the right isotope for my home-reactor with the correct atomic properties to ensure the flux capacity for power peaking.

Example #3:I bought this product for my son's science fair project and now he has created a swarm of ZOMBIES. Please help they cut off our phone lines and locked us in the computer room. Our Address is 1234 Brainless Dr.

Example #4: I have been using this product (well, I bought about a hundred of them), and I still have not gotten my super-powers. Is there anyway the manufacturer can send me some info and maybe a timeline as to how long this is supposed to take? I have these bits duct tape all over my body, but all I'm getting is an annoying rash and these weird lumps on my head and testicles. I hope this doesn't mean I'm getting some lame ass unicorn powers, because the one lump is on the side of my head and that would look bloody silly to have a Power Horn there. Not to mention I'll have to do some severe work on my jockey shorts if the horns sprout there.

Example #5:Did not work as I expect! I buy for project, we make great reactor! Suddenly reactor turns too hot, big explosion! Now city is destroyed and horror movie is made about place... Worst of all we make Sweden angry! They say we give them radioactive animals! Is lie, we only contaminate little bit of Russia! I put picture of result in customer images. Not happy with this.

Since there are approximately 350 such reviews on Amazon, this should keep us all busy for quite some time (I'd love to hear which comment you think is the funniest).

If you found this article to be of interest, visit Programmable Logic Designline where – in addition to my Max's Cool Beans blogs – you will find the latest and greatest design, technology, product, and news articles with regard to programmable logic devices of every flavor and size (FPGAs, CPLDs, CSSPs, PSoCs...).

Also, you can obtain a highlights update delivered directly to your inbox by signing up for my weekly newsletter – just Click Here to request this newsletter using the Manage Newsletters tab (if you aren't already a member you'll be asked to register, but it's free and painless so don't let that stop you [grin]).

http://www.amazon.com/2009-2014-Outlook-Toilet-Seats-Greater/dp/B001SNVXYA/ref=pd_sbs_indust_3
Though 'The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification' might be more in your price range.
http://www.amazon.com/Stray-Shopping-Carts-Eastern-America/dp/0810955202/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342728737&sr=1-1&keywords=shopping+carts

I also got the link to the outlook for wooden toilet seats in China. I guess there are a lot of bottoms in China, if you could sell 0.1% of them a wooden toilet seat you'd probably get rich pretty quick.
Seems these links are random and you don't get the same ones every time? I guess it makes life interesting though.....

nope, in china, inside ppl's house will have real toilet seats. Squat is for travelers and foreigners, chinese don't want to share a toilet seat with a stranger like you, they are afraid of all kind of weird diseases...

I've got a chunk of uranium ore around here somewhere. It was a mineral sample, stuck to a small card, which they used to sell. I remember getting it as a boy, but I don't remember where. Do they still sell mineral samples like that? Mine was about an inch across.
I never had it tested. My son was going to try it out in his science lab, but I think he lost the nerve (in case he was discovered carrying uranium ore in his pocket).

Andy_I, Along the same lines, I remember as a boy, our neighbor was a miner engineer of some sort, and his son always dazzles us with his latest finding.
I remember very clearly receiving a small vile (perhaps couple ounces) of mercury to "PLAY" with.
Not realizing the toxic nature of it at the time, remember how my friend would play with the mercury in his hands, creating interesting ripple effects while poured from hand to hand. :-)

Interesting...Max next time you are on a flight, take your geiger counter with you and test this (I didn't get the opportunity while I had it...) and let us know. Let's hope you don't get arrested at security though...

Been trolling some of these oldie-but-goodie posts, and the Interent meme engine keeps on chugging, like this comment:

It's been almost 100 days since I "disposed" of the Uranium Ore I purchased from Amazon.com. Seeing as how they sent me 10 orders instead of 1 I thought it would be alright to dispose of the two or three cans in the backyard. 91 days later and I'm barricaded in my house, beseiged by mutated grasshoppers, bees, wasps, and ants the size of ponies. My food stores are dwindling; I only have a few gallons ofTuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz left, though a spritz of Uranium Ore has kept it fresh all this time. I'm down to my last box of Fresh Whole Rabbit as well. Even though I had to kill them (again), some of the Uranium Ore I used on the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz has also helped them stay fresh during these past few months.

I think there are ~1,000 of my old "Cool Beans" blogs out there basking in the Internet equivalent of lounge chairs just waiting for someon to find them and re-introduce them to the world. (Tag, you're "it" :-)

For some reason I'm reminded of a pantomime -- I have a vision of myself working at my desk as I am ... looking over the top of my monitors so see a huge audience staring at me, with the wide-eyed kids pointing and shouting"She's behind you!!!"