Want To Make Your Girlfriend/Boyfriend Bust A SERIOUS Nut? Hit It In The Morning

My homegirl recently squirted for the first time, and if you’ve ever read this blog before, you will know that I consider squirting orgasms the apex of sexual achievement. When she explained to me HOW it happened, it reinforced something I’ve felt for the longest time: Wake up sex is the most rewarding and pleasurable sex a serious couple can have.

Now I’ve written about all different KINDS of sex, such as Anywhere Sex [CLICK HERE], Raw Sex [CLICK HERE], and even Bondage [CLICK HERE] which for the most part can apply to single people and those in the early stages of a relationship [maybe not so much the RAW sex], but when you are in a serious relationship with someone you love, trust and are completely comfortable with, besides maybe Make-Up sex, WAKE-UP sex is probably the BEST way to make your partner cum HARD – HARDER than deciphering auxiliary polynomial theorems – even HARDER than imagining Whoopi Goldberg’s clitoris anywhere near your face or mouth. That HARD.

When my homegirl told me about her freaky introduction into the Sorority of Squirting Sisters, I couldn’t HELP but hear J. Cole’s song in the back of my mind as she gave me the explicit rundown [Press play and continue reading]:

“So me and my man had an argument on Saturday night because I wanted him to spend the night with me watching bootleg romantic comedies and instead he stood me up to go out with his boys to some played out party downtown. I was heated at his punk-a*s, so when he came over to apologize Sunday night I was a b*tch to him the entire day but I figured his a*s deserved it for tryin’ to play me. So that night we ended up going to bed angry even though we don’t like doing that.

In the middle of the night I had a real sexy dream where a long, wet tongue was diving between my legs and licking all over my kitty [women, why do y’all call it that? Sh*t’s wack – anyways], and I was soaking wet and as I slowly woke up out of the dream, I was definitely still wet as hell, but I was still feeling that warm, wet, firm tongue flicking my clit, so I reached down between my legs, half to touch myself because I was so horny and half to convince my mind to wake up and stop tricking me into thinking I was actually getting head [women saying “head” still makes me chuckle – anyways] and to my surprise I found my man’s damn head down there!

He was in the middle of sucking my clit and stroking my spot with his two fingers and I was so lost in his brains [Hysterical – OK, I’ll stop interrupting] that I forgot I went to bed mad at him. The fact that my brain wasn’t even fully functioning helped because I was only focused on what that long tongue and strong fingers were doing to my wet kitty. And before I knew it I squirted for the first time in my life and my body started shaking like it never has before! And my damn man couldn’t even wait for me to stop shaking and let my kitty recover before he put his long-a*s richard in me and started beating it up until I squirted all over him again.

Damn, I never even got to keep being mad at him after that..”

Now granted, she had Make-Up, Wake-Up and Raw sex all at the same time, but the point I’m trying to make is that the WAKE-UP part is one of the most amazing ways to introduce your woman to squirtastic orgasms. But don’t let me confuse you into thinking it’s exclusive only to women, because Ladies, it works for men too. Most healthy men are erect for the better part of the night anyways, so if you want to surprise him with some nocturnal deepthroating that’s definitely what’s hot in the streets to men everywhere.

But once again, this is a COUPLE move, because taking simultaneousness liberties with someone else’s genitals AND sleep is something you should do only with someone you love. But if you do it right, chances are you will need to start investing in waterproof bed sheets.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.