Contents tagged with harvey brownstone

Episode 205
- Internet Dating with eHarmony

Grant Langston of eHarmony goes into more depth on safe Internet dating.
Experts tell us that almost 80% of couples meet each other online. And why not? It's incredibly easy to connect with people, near and far, without ever leaving your home. And it can be fun, and exciting, and of course, romantic. But you need to be cautious, because not everyone you encounter online is the person they claim to be. What are the best practices and pitfalls you should be aware of?

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Grant Langston of eHarmony goes into more depth on safe Internet dating.
Experts tell us that almost 80% of couples meet each other online. And why not? It's incredibly easy to connect with people, near and far, without ever leaving your home. And it can be fun, and exciting, and of course, romantic. But you need to be cautious, because not everyone you encounter online is the person they claim to be. What are the best practices and pitfalls you should be aware of?

Next season Family Matters will be dedicating an episode to spousal support. Spousal support is one of the most contested issues in separation and divorce proceedings in Canada. While each province has its own legislation to deal with common law spouses and married couples that separate but do not divorce, the dominating piece of legislation is the federal Divorce Act. The following includes some of my reflections when exploring the topic of spousal support.

After doing some background research on spousal support, I was surprised at how many goals and purposes are behind spousal support decisions. I was also surprised that some of these goals and purposes conflict with each other. The unfortunate result is that all courts have to perform a balancing act between these purposes and it often results in less than clear decisions. Considering that divorce isn’t the most cooperative process (to say the least), it is easy to see how this unpredictability can encourage costly court battles. To demonstrate this point, I will try to briefly describe three of the many purposes of spousal support.

One purpose is to compensate a former spouse for any investments they lost from the divorce. The typical scenario is when someone sacrificed a career to care for children. That sacrifice saved child-caring costs and allowed the other spouse to build a career with a stronger income, but prevented the stay-at-home parent from increasing their earning potential. When divorce strikes, that stay-at-home parent bears a bigger loss than the other spouse, so courts recognize they should balance that financial impact between the parties.

Another purpose is to ensure the financial needs of both spouses are taken care of.If one party no longer has the means to provide for themselves, then the other party should continue to provide for them. On the other hand, spousal support shouldn’t be granted unless the other party is actually able to pay it. Both parties needs have to be addressed before a reasonable conclusion can be made.

The big competing purpose (against the disadvantaged spouse) is that spousal support decisions need to encourage self-sufficiency of a disadvantaged spouse. If there wasn’t a push, some ex-spouses may never try to provide for themselves. They may try to just live off the other for as long as possible. Since that would hardly seem fair to a payer, courts recognize they have to try and prevent freeloading.

These are just three of many different purposes considered in spousal support decisions and already it is easy to see a balancing act. Real cases are much more complex so it is usually much less clear cut as to what the courts will decide. Unfortunately, this gives hope to both spouses that they may win a court battle, so it encourages fights instead of settlements.

Court battles cost large amounts of time and money. Often the amount a spouse can gain by a favourable judgement is not as much as the costs of litigation. Instead of sitting down and coming to a fair agreement themselves, many divorcees find a big chunk of their money go towards lawyers and legal fees to fight in court. That being said, court battles are often based on bitterness instead of any financial incentive, so financial sense may not prevent many cases from going to court.

In an attempt to address these issues, the Department of Justice of Canada supported the creation of Spousal Support Advisory Guidelines. These Guidelines are not law. Instead they are just a formula to assist in determining a fair number for support, and don’t address whether a spouse is entitled to spousal support. They have been a tool to help maintain a focus on the issues and to help parties resolve the issue before it goes to court. Judges also refer to them when they make decisions. Real cases are much more complex than can be captured in a formula, but the Guidelines can be regarded as a useful starting point.

Complex issues in inherently confrontational areas of law, such as divorce proceedings, will never have a simple solution. A broad general framework with many purposes and principles is required in order to be flexible enough to deal with the complexity of divorce cases. Unfortunately, a broad framework also usually brings uncertainty and litigation. Hopefully we are moving towards a legal system that can better manage these costs.

Tyler Holte is a J.D. Candidate at the University of Victoria Law School. He completed his B.Com at University of Alberta in 2012 with a major in Business Economics and Law with a minor in Accounting. Tyler is currently the First Year Representative of the Intellectual Property, Information, and Technology Law Club at University of Victoria. He formerly taught probability and statistics lab at MacEwan Univsersity.

The views in this blog are not necessarily representative of AdviceScene and do not constitute legal advice.

Next season, one of our episodes will be on the theme of "Family Court 101" and will discuss the basics of Family Court and its court processes. The following is an introduction to the topic.

What is Family Court?

For many Canadians, the court system can seem complex and inaccessible. For those who are also dealing with the emotional strain accompanying family legal issues, the task of navigating Family Court can seem particularly daunting.

A look at the larger court structure can help break down what Family Court is and how it works. In Canada, there are two courts which deal with family legal issues: provincial courts (“Family Court”) and Supreme Courts. Family Courts are simply branches of the provincial courts that deal with certain family law issues. It is important to note that while there is some overlap in what issues the two different courts can address, there are also jurisdictional requirements that state that certain issues are to be addressed in a particular court. When considering what court can address a particular family law issue, it is important to keep these differences in mind.

Family Court Jurisdiction: What Issues Can be Addressed in Family Court?

Family Court can address issues related to:

child custody and guardianship,

access to children,

parental, spousal, and child support,

child protection orders and

personal protection orders.

Family Court cannot deal with cases involving:

divorce,

adoptions, or

the division of family property.

The last three must be addressed in Supreme Court as they fall under the purview of federal laws. In B.C., Family Court’s jurisdiction is governed by the Family Relations Act, the Family Maintenance Enforcement Act, the Child, Family and Community Service Act, and the Adult Guardianship Act. If you wish to obtain a divorce, have assets divided or make an adoption order you cannot address these in Family Court.

The Application Process

The application process for Family Court varies depending on what the particular family law issue is. Some carry certain pre-court requirements that applicants attend programming such as Parenting After Separation courses or meet with a Family Justice Counsellor to explore alternative dispute resolution options. The family law clerk at any provincial courthouse can help applicants understand the requirements for their particular issue and what steps they will need to take to apply to the court. If the situation is such that one of the parties or the parties’ children are in danger, such as in domestic violence and abuse cases, personal protection orders may be obtained to protect individuals during the legal process.

Basics of the Family Court Process

There are two ways in which Family Court may resolve legal disputes. First, a settlement of the parties’ dispute through negotiation or mediation may resolve the dispute before it goes to court. Negotiation is a bargaining process where parties attempt to reach an agreement regarding the dispute with or without lawyers. In mediation, a trained and neutral third-party meets with the parties and tries to help them reach a settlement. If negotiation or mediation processes are successful, the settlement can be put into writing and will confer legal obligations upon the parties. This is called a consent order.

In some cases, judges may require that the parties attend a pre-trial “Family Case Conference” over which the judge will preside. These conferences are private, informal meetings where the judge can ascertain what issues are disputed, mediate these disputes, try to assist the parties to reach an agreement and determine what other alternatives to a trial might be feasible. If an agreement can be reached, the judge can make a consent order during the conference.

If alternative dispute resolution methods fail or are not feasible, the parties will go to trial before a Family Court judge who will weigh the evidence and both parties’ arguments to make an ultimate order regarding the dispute. Witnesses may be called by both sides to support their arguments, but in some cases the only witnesses are the parties to the dispute themselves. Parties may self-represent in Family Court and do not require lawyers.

After trial, final decisions in Family Court may be appealed to the Supreme Court. Decisions from the Supreme Court can likewise be appealed to the Court of Appeal. This is an expensive process which may outweigh the benefits from a positive ruling.

Accessibility and Self-Representation in Family Court

Certain structural aspects of Family Court make it more accessible to lay litigants. The court rules are written in plain language that is easy to understand, making it much easier to self-represent in Family Court than in Supreme Court or a Court of Appeal. The court forms are also written in plain language, allowing applicants without legal training or counsel to fill them out themselves. Family Court also does not charge litigants court fees, making it considerably less expensive than pursuing a claim in Supreme Court or the Court of Appeal. Generally speaking, Supreme Court and the Court of Appeal have much more formal and structured court processes than Family Court. They carry more complex rules governing court processes and adhere to them more strictly.

Family Court Today

The number of cases initiated in Family Court has been on the rise since 1995, and the Court’s emphasis has shifted to alternative dispute resolution and informational programming in an attempt to alleviate some of the resultant pressure. Today, efforts are generally made to resolve the family law dispute before it goes to trial before a judge. Despite this, the number of Family Court cases remains on an upward trend and the consequent overburdening of the court system has led to criticisms that taking claims to Family Court is an arduous and slow process.

Shari Willis is a J.D. Candidate at the University of Victoria Law School. She completed her B.A. at Simon Fraser University in 2010 with a major in Women's, Gender, and Sexuality Studies and an extended minor in English. Shari formerly worked as a support worker and was active in campaigns and initiatives dedicated to ending violence against women.

The views in this blog are not necessarily representative of AdviceScene and do not constitute legal advice.

Episode 113
- Online Security and Privacy

Guests: OMAR HA-REDEYE, GUY ROSARIO

In today’s world everyone, even children, have daily multiple Internet connectivity (social networking, banking, shopping). And the experts tell us this is just the beginning of the huge potential that the Internet has to impact the way we live our lives and conduct our businesses.

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Guests: OMAR HA-REDEYE, GUY ROSARIO

In today’s world everyone, even children, have daily multiple Internet connectivity (social networking, banking, shopping). And the experts tell us this is just the beginning of the huge potential that the Internet has to impact the way we live our lives and conduct our businesses.

Episode 111
- Remarriage

Guests: PAULA BISACRE, KARINA SACCA

What are the potential obstacles to achieving a lasting happiness the second or third time around? What are the pitfalls you should be aware of in creating a blended family? It looked so easy on the Brady Bunch, but our guests are here to tell us that real life can be very different.

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Guests: PAULA BISACRE, KARINA SACCA

What are the potential obstacles to achieving a lasting happiness the second or third time around? What are the pitfalls you should be aware of in creating a blended family? It looked so easy on the Brady Bunch, but our guests are here to tell us that real life can be very different.

Episode 105
- The Smart Divorce

Guests: DEBORAH MOSKOVITCH

Learn how to minimize conflict and enter into child-focused decision-making, reinvent yourself from an “ex-partner” to a “co-parent” and surround yourself with the people you need to maximize your opportunities for success in dealing with an ex-partner. Conversation with Debrah Moskovitch, author of The Smart Divorce.

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Guests: DEBORAH MOSKOVITCH

Learn how to minimize conflict and enter into child-focused decision-making, reinvent yourself from an “ex-partner” to a “co-parent” and surround yourself with the people you need to maximize your opportunities for success in dealing with an ex-partner. Conversation with Debrah Moskovitch, author of The Smart Divorce.

Episode 101
- Parental Alienation

Guests:
LORNE MACLEAN, RHONDA PISANELLO

In recent years a new buzz word has evolved in the family law world: "parental alienation". This is a term which refers to the very concerning practice among many separated parents of doing everything within their power to turn their children against the other parent.

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Guests:
LORNE MACLEAN, RHONDA PISANELLO

In recent years a new buzz word has evolved in the family law world: "parental alienation". This is a term which refers to the very concerning practice among many separated parents of doing everything within their power to turn their children against the other parent.

Family Lawyer Magazine spoke with Judge Harvey Brownstone, who has been sitting on the family law bench for over a decade, and asked him to share some advice for family lawyers on how they can be more successful and better serve their clients. Judge Brownstone shared six outstanding tips with us.

1: Know and respect your client’s emotional stage.

It’s rare that divorcing spouses are at the same emotional stage. It’s far more common – in fact, it’s the norm with very few exceptions – for one spouse to have emotionally disengaged from the marriage months, or even years before formal divorce proceedings begin.

And while it’s an overstatement to say that even the most emotionally prepared spouse is 100% ready for what the real divorce experience holds in store – with all of its uncertainties, stresses, procedures, complex children’s issues and of course, costs – it’s true that the spouse who initiates the divorce is almost always in much better shape to make key divorce decisions: what to do with the house, how to tie up the loose ends, and so on.

Family lawyers therefore do their client – and themselves, for that matter – an immense service by paying close attention to their client’s emotional stage. Are they emotionally disengaged, and therefore capable of seeing their divorce as a business transaction? Or are they reeling from having the “divorce bomb” dropped on them from above, and can’t separate the emotional issues from the practical ones?

If it’s the latter – and it’s not difficult for a perceptive, attentive family lawyer to quickly evaluate this – then my advice is clear: family lawyers should get their client into heavy duty counseling at the earliest possible opportunity.

Why? Obviously because their client is suffering deeply and perhaps even emotionally shattered, and attending to that serious problem ASAP is why professional counseling exists in the first place. But in addition to that, in the context of the divorce, family lawyers need to equip and empower their clients to separate the emotional issues from the business ones, so they can make wise, long-term decisions now — and not later, after the divorce is finalized, and when it’s too late.

I won’t suggest that counseling during divorce can totally heal clients – for most spouses divorce is traumatic, and it can take years for the healing to completely finish (if ever). But with that being said, counseling helps clients get to a point where they can make objective, well-considered decisions regarding their divorce. And frankly, that’s what clients want, that’s what their children want, that’s what judges want, that’s what family lawyers should want, too.

First TV show ever hosted by a real judge! Expert guests include authors, judges, lawyers, and counselors. All your family law questions answered in an entertaining talk show format.Season 1, Episodes 1 - 5, Disc 1 of 3

Episode 1. Parental AlienationGuests: Lorne MacLean, Rhonda Pisanello

In recent years a new "buzz word" has evolved in the family law world: parental alienation. This is a term which refers to the very concerning practice among many separated parents of doing everything within their power to turn their children against the other parent. Why is it so difficult for some parents to accept that their children have a right and a need to enjoy a happy, healthy, loving relationship with both parents? How effective is the family justice system in addressing this serious problem? There are some very innovative and ground-breaking solutions being implemented by the mental health profession. What are they and do they succeed in re-integrating alienated children with their non-custodial parents? Learn all about this fascinating phenomenon in this special episode of "Family Matters".

In this new age of "cyberlove" and casual relationships, the family law world is seeing an avalanche of short term relationships that fizzle out quickly - but they last long enough to produce children. There is a new-found emphasis on the rights and responsibilities of grandparents, particularly when people become parents at an early age. What does the law say about the role that grandparents are allowed to play in the lives of their grandchildren following a family breakdown? How do the courts treat grandparents? Join Justice Brownstone in this groundbreaking landmark episode featuring experts who will share their advice on this increasingly important topic.

Episode 3. Parent CoordinatorsGuests: Shelagh Kinney, John-Paul Boyd

One of the most exciting new fields that has arisen in recent years is parenting coordination. A growing number of separated and divorced parents have opted to resolve their disputes privately, without going to court, by relying on the assistance and expertise of specially trained social workers and mental health professionals who serve as parenting coordinators. What are the pros and cons of using this form of alternative dispute resolution? How much does it cost? What kinds of parental disputes are best suited to parenting coordination? How do you find parenting coordinators in your community? Join Justice Brownstone and his expert guests for a lively and highly informative episode where all of these issues will be discussed, and much more.

Episode 4. Marriage ConfidentialGuest: Pamela Haag

What is happening with marriage in North America today? Both as an institution and as an evolving construct for relationships and partnerships? This episode looks at Marriage Confidential. The goal on this show is to explore all aspects of family and marriage. The guest is Pamela Haag. She has written an insightful and controversial book entitled, Marriage Confidential: The Post-Romantic Age of Workhorse Wives, Royal Children, Undersexed Spouses, and Rebel Couples who are Rewriting the Rules.

Episode 5. The Smart DivorceGuest: Deborah Moskovitch

One-on-one conversation with Debrah Moskovitch, author of The Smart Divorce. Learn how to turn a relationship breakdown into a positive life-changing experience. Learn how to minimize conflict and enter into child-focused decision-making. Learn how to reinvent yourself from an "ex-partner" to a "co-parent". And best of all, learn how to surround yourself with the people you need to maximize your opportunities for success in dealing with an ex-partner.

First TV show ever hosted by a real judge! Expert guests include authors, judges, lawyers, and counselors. All your family law questions answered in an entertaining talk show format.Season 1, Episodes 6 - 10, Disc 2 of 3

Episode 6. A View from the BenchGuest: Judge Michael Porter (retired)

This episode provides the rare privilege of hearing from an outspoken retired family court judge from Alberta who spent 22 years resolving all kinds of parental disputes. We will have a frank and candid discussion and I have invited him to unleash his most forthright insights into the family justice system. He will also tell us why he left the court in 1997 to pursue what he believes is a much healthier and effective way to help parents resolve their conflicts.

Given the advent of the Internet with its seemingly limitless availability of sexually explicit content, it should come as no surprise that this can be a serious challenge for many people suffering from potentially addictive personalities. What are sexual addictions? How does such an addiction develop? What is the impact on relationships and families when a parent is suffering from a sexual addiction? What are the signs that partners and loved ones should look for if a sexual addiction is suspected? How, if at all, do sexual addictions affect one's parenting capacity? What help is available for people suffering from sexual addictions and their partners? Join Justice Brownstone as he probes all of these issues with experts in the field.

In the last half-century, parenting dynamics in many families have changed, as more moms have entered the workforce, requiring more dads to share the parenting duties. In fact, it's no longer that uncommon to find some families with stay-at-home dads, with moms who are the breadwinners. How has this shifting culture been reflected in parenting arrangements after separation? Courts make custody and access decisions based on the best interests of the child, not the parents. But many people continue to express a very disturbing perception of the law and the justice system, and there's a lot of advocacy for 50-50 shared parenting. What does the law have to say about that? And what can be done to make mothers and fathers more child-focused in their parenting decisions?

Episode 9. Pets and DivorceGuests: Rebeka Breder, Dr. Rebecca Ledger

Any pet owner will agree that pets are family too! What happens to pets when family breakdown occurs? What is the best way to keep children and their pets emotionally bonded even if they can't live together? How do you get pets to become accustomed to living in two (or more) different homes? How do you ensure a harmonious household if new pets (for example, a parent's new partner's dog or cat) are introduced into the home? Is it a good idea to give a pet to a child experiencing the angst of parental separation, to help relieve the child's stress and loneliness? Do pets experience grief and anxiety when a family breaks up?

Episode 10. Domestic AbuseGuests: Judge Gary Cohen, Carolyn Fast

Although this topic only infrequently receives public attention, it is a sad reality of North American life that many homes are fraught with domestic violence. Quite apart from the trauma that this imposes upon victims, it is now well-accepted that when children witness their parents arguing and fighting, this is a form of child abuse. How prevalent is domestic violence? Why does it occur? Can it be prevented and treated? What can be done to insulate children from this situation. How effective are the courts in addressing this serious social issue? Justice Brownstone will address all of these issues in this much-anticipated episode.

First TV show ever hosted by a real judge! Expert guests include authors, judges, lawyers, and counselors. All your family law questions answered in an entertaining talk show format.Season 1, Episodes 11 - 15, Disc 3 of 3

What are the potential obstacles to achieving a lasting happiness the second - or third - time around? What are the pitfalls you should be aware of in creating a blended family? It looked so easy on the Brady Bunch, but our guests are here to tell us that real life can be very different. What are the special needs of people who are contemplating or already in a new relationship, especially if there are children and ex-partners involved in the big picture?

Episode 12. Family Law AccessGuest: Judge Jane Cartwright

One of the most contentious issues that can arise for separated parents in conflict is the question of how to divide a child's time between parents. Regardless of who has custody, and even in cases of joint or shared custody, the fact remains that a child cannot be in two places at once. Many parents have great difficulty devising a parenting schedule which maximizes the child's time with each parent, in a way that best meets the parents' schedules and most importantly, the best interests of the child. This is particularly challenging with very young infants, or in cases where parents do not live close to each other. Also sometimes a parent alleges that the other poses a risk to the child's safety and well-being. Judge Jane Cartwright of the BC Provincial Court will discuss the legal principles and practical considerations that apply when a court is asked to make decisions about parental access to children.

Nowadays, everyone has daily multiple Internet connectivity: social networking, banking, shopping and a variety of others. The experts tell us this is just the beginning of the huge potential that the Internet has to impact the way we live our lives and conduct our businesses. How secure is our confidential information that is stored online? We hear about major corporate databases being hacked, and mass breaches of online security. We are told that identity theft is one of the fastest growing crimes. What can we do to protect ourselves from these risks?

Episode 14. Divorce with DignityGuest: Karen Stewart

Have you ever heard of the term "the divorce from hell"? Probably every marriage breakdown has hellish aspects to it, but everything is relative, even high conflict divorces. In this episode you will meet author Karen Stewart, who emerged from "divorce hell" with a mission: to ensure that no one ever makes the same mistakes that she and her ex-husband made. Her book, Clean Break, urges separating couples to learn from her "poor choices and misplaced trust". In this episode she will explain the pitfalls that so many couples contend with as they navigate the complicated and often frustrating family justice system. Her own experiences form the foundation for the innovative process she founded as CEO of Fairway Divorce Solutions.

Episode 15. Fairway DivorceGuest: Karen Stewart

In recent years, members of the legal and mental health community have been exploring new ways to assist parents in conflict to resolve disputes in a non-adversarial, cooperative and cost-effective way. In this episode, Justice Brownstone, who has long advocated for keeping parents and children out of family court, will interview Karen Stewart, CEO of Canada's biggest and most popular dispute resolution company, FAIRWAY, about their unique and innovative process of spousal dispute resolution.