That’s it, Chad. We’re done.

An ill-advised reference to Chad Barrett as “my boy” on the It’s Called Football show earlier this year has led many to believe that I have some deep-rooted affection for the moody, Rooney-looking goofball. In reality, I don’t, other than normal human sympathy for any person who tries so hard, but is so completely useless at what they do.

But after last night, even that emotion has gone out the window, replaced by the anger and disappointment at (barring a sporting miracle) having to watch Vancouver in this year’s CONCACAF Champions League instead of Toronto. With the Reds down 1-0, in a game where a draw would have clinched the Voyageurs Cup, Barrett was the recipient of a positively beautiful swinging free kick off the foot of Dwayne DeRosario that left him with a completely free header, six yards away from the goal. All he had to do was put any sort of movement on it, any sort of angle that would drive it into the net. Instead, the ball went directly into the bread basket of Whitecaps keeper Jay Nolly. Toronto, as you probably know, went on to lose 2-0, all but eliminating them from this year’s Nutrilite Canadian Championship.

Barrett has missed countless sitters in his career before. But this one was the last straw. Chad, you’re no longer my boy. I can no longer put up with this abuse. I stood by you, stupidly, even as everyone around me said what a fool I was being… but now, finally, I’ve seen the light. You tell me you can change, but I no longer believe it. So we’re through. It’s not me, it’s you.

Thanks for the support, guys. But now that I’ve had a day to think about it, maybe he’s not so bad… he’s told me he can change, and y’know what, I think I believe him… yeah, yeah, he’ll change! He’ll change for me! I know it! I’m going to send him a “tweet” right now…!