Developing the next generation of exceptional leaders

Can we coach for confidence in living our own values?

One of our coaches finished up a coaching assignment this morning, and as you do, reviewed with his client what was different at the end of the six sessions.

At the outset of the coaching assignment this coachee’s biggest fear – in her newly acquired and more senior role – was that she would be forced to compromise her strong personal values in some politically sensitive or ambiguous situations.

As the engagement drew to a close, the coachee reflected on the fact that she had developed the awareness that it was in fact her core values that had got her where she was; realising that they were the foundation of her success in her career so far. As luck would have it, shortly after starting out in the new role, life had delivered some very real situations for her to work her way through. In the process of problem solving, planning and reflection, she realised that her values were actually a core strength that allowed her to navigate through some very complex situations and reach highly successful outcomes. This in turn bolstered her confidence, which was another key area that she had identified to work on.

Her final reflections were that she in fact has far greater confidence in her ability than she had previously perceived, and it is that confidence that enables her to achieve what she does in her role.

Can it be too simple to say that getting clear on our values and then ensuring that everything that we do is aligned with those values can actually deliver the sense of confidence in our ability that we perceive ourselves to be lacking? I don’t think so.

Postscript: sadly, it is often women who express the feelings that they lack confidence in new/senior roles. For this reason the Institute has developed our IEC Women’s Program. Learn more

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Since confidence precedes competence, that is a very good question for women executives and coaches to explore.

Women managers bring uniquely feminine styles, motivations and skills to professional life and have learned to use some of their strengths — like empathy, adaptability and strong verbal skills — to their advantage. Unfortunately, another typically feminine characteristic, self-doubt, often follows women into the workplace. Self-doubt and unwillingness to be aggressive can result in lower earnings, diminished stature and missed opportunities, even for women who are qualified and enthusiastic managers.

Since the culture at most companies has been shaped over time by male executives, women are at a disadvantage when it comes to gender-based differences in communication styles.

A report, “Women and Men in U.S. Corporate Leadership: Same Workplace, Different Realities?”, by Catalyst, a New York-based nonprofit, found that 81% of women said that “adopting a style with which male managers are comfortable” is an important or very important strategy to advance one’s career.

Working with an executive coach can help you to be clear on the communication style at your level within the company and to confidently practice this style so you will be heard at work.