Saturday, July 28, 2007

I know I went missing again but those who are following my blog will know I'm a lazy bum and keep disappearing without any interesting post. SORRWWWEEE.....And while I'm packing for my Chiang Mai trip, here's loads of pictures so that you guys wont miss me much.

Date : 22/JulyVenue : Ee's placeLast Sunday me and my bunch of crazy colleagues went to Ee's big house for a barbecue feast. I craveeeed for BBQ so much. It has been some time since the good old days with my friends, BBQing at either Deb's or Nai's house.It was a rainy night but this keep us cool and not too hot while BBQing.

Only fishballs and sausages? Where's the wing? Where's the wing???? How can we BBQ without any wingsss???

Girls preparing the food.

Guys preparing the stove.

Here's the chicken wing. Hehe.

Wong!! You lazy bum. Everyone is helping but you.

Cooking. Cooking.BBQ is always tedious but tonnes of fun.

Everyone is happy with the food. Cook or not I'm not sure...but we're already too hungry.

All full now.And who has the biggest belly?

Group photo time. How boring.But for a piece of memory, it's priceless.

Hehe..

Date : 14/JulyVenue : McDAt last, Lulu came back from the states...after how many years, 6? 8? I don't remember....it has been too long. But ppl just never change. She's still as cute as ever.She bought along her DSLR camera (Yokie insisted her to bring along, dunno how many time she reminded Lulu) and Yokie was hugging the camera like a baby for the whole night. But the camera was undeniably a photography miracle. It transformed our ugliness(although not much, haha) into beauty.

We love black and look good in it. keke.

I don't know what else to pose and Yokie keep snapping the camera.

We are so prettyyyyyy!!!!!!

Lulu scolding Yokie for being such a nuisance with the camera.You'll notice she's not in any of the pictures (except the one above).

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

2005 is a bad year for me and I had a hard time going through by myself. Losing someone (my grandma) I loved dearly was a painful experience. She was as close to my as my parents. Her funeral was on the third day of my second job. I never gave her any money after I graduated. First job paid me a scratch RM1200. I was just too happy to get a new job that pays me double. But unfortunately, she could not wait for me. On her funeral, I believe there's no one that cried more than me. But on the day of cremation, there's no more tears to cry. And that was when I felt my heart ached.And also going through a staling relationship was definitely another reason why 2005 was a bad year.

2006 was a superb year. There were just too many reasons why it was so great. I was having too much fun that year and just a few days before celebrating the New Year of 2007, I ended up lying in Hospital Pantai Putri....and that was a very bad indication for the coming year.

Despite the super bonus and promotion I got from work, everything else was going downhill. Another painful incident happened to me which will be the burden and resentment for the rest of my life. And I had to carry this burden of guilt for the rest of my life without telling anyone. And then my dad. I always know cancer illness runs in the family but only when it hit my dad I could feel the shock and anxiety. But don't worry, my family and I are going through this strongly.

And then suddenly I realize I'm in a relationship that doesn't promise me anything. Am happy. But what is happiness? What does happiness promise me? Does happiness promise me any future? Happiness is intangible. I always thought I have happiness but actually, I don't really know if happiness is there. I can't touch it, taste it or feel it. I just think I have happiness. Ignorance is bliss.

But it's just a matter of time on how long I can ignore. And wait.

Everyone sees me as an optimistic and smart gal, which I have to keep on portraying, which is tough. Especially during a bad year like this one.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Ok...a quick one here. I'm coming up with a longer post but I'm too tire now. Woke up 6.15am early in the morning (I never woke up so darn early even on working days, aaakkkkk) and went all the way to Sungkai for my colleague's wedding ceremony. Sungkai is a small and quiet town but they has a popular hot springs park. I'd been there last year and I know Yokie is dying to go there. hehe...Lots of lovebirds are tying their knots today because of the significant date 07.07.2007. Almost everywhere we went to, there's kenduri or wedding ceremony and decorated rows of cars parading the streets and restaurants jam-packed with wedding dinners. Ain't that lovely? Couples tend to pick the best date to represent their happiest day. Same will happen next year 08.08.2008 and also 09.09.2009 (I believe this will be the hotcake because of the number '9' longevity meaning). Sigh...some couples are just so romantic. And I don't even have my own official relationship anniversary date.

Erm, the quick post is a bit too short but I wanted to write something before I take my noon nap.

Here's two song that I'm listening over and over and over again and still can't get enough of them. They are such beautiful song with dramatically sad lyrics. Sing along with meeeeeee.

Title : The Pieces Don't Fit Anymore (so good that it's haunting)Artist : James Morrison (can't stop drooling at his curls)I've been twisting and turning,In a space that's too small.I've been drawing the line and watching it fall,You've been closing me in, closing the space in my heart.Watching us fading and watching it all fall apart.

ChorusWell I can't explain why it's not enough, Cause I gave it all to you.And if you leave me now, oh just leave me now.It's the better thing to do,It's time to surrender,It's been to long pretending.Theres no use in trying,When the pieces don't fit anymore, Pieces don't fit here anymore.

You pulled me under,If I had to give in.Such a beautiful myth,That's breaking my skin.Well I'll hide all the bruises,I'll hide all the damage that's done.But I show how I'm feeling until all the feeling has gone.

Title : What Hurts The Most(Listening to the song is sad enough, watching the music video made me want to cryyyyy)Artist : Rascal Flatts

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty houseThat don't bother meI can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em outI'm not afraid to cry every once in a whileEven though going on with you gone still upsets meThere are days every now and again I pretend I'm okBut that's not what gets me

What hurts the mostWas being so closeAnd having so much to sayAnd watching you walk awayAnd never knowingWhat could have beenAnd not seeing that loving youIs what I was tryin' to do

It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I goBut I'm doin' ItIt's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm aloneStill HarderGetting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regretBut I know if I could do it overI would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heartThat I left unspoken

What hurts the mostIs being so closeAnd having so much to sayAnd watching you walk awayAnd never knowingWhat could have beenAnd not seeing that loving youIs what I was trying to do

What hurts the most was beingso closeAnd having so much to sayAnd watching you walk awayAnd never knowingWhat could have beenAnd not seeing that loving youIs what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving youThat's what I was trying to do

Done karaoke-ing. Time for my beauty nap now. And then dinner at Menglembu (so far errr...) and then hanging out with my friends.