Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Welcome home??

It doesn't quite feel like ours yet. Living out of boxes, going from 1500 square feet to about 700.

Downsizing.

Good stuff: we're on one level. Luther can roll right out the back door and be outside. Saving some money. Parents right upstairs if we need help.

Not so good stuff: See above, the part about going to 700 square feet.

I haven't written much because I'd say I've had no time. Really though, I have no thoughts in my head. I head out to therapy in a couple hours; there's always a feeling of dread because I have nothing to say. Funny though, I always find a zillion things to say.

Just wanted to check in. Sometimes I come to this blog page and it's easy to write. Other times, like today, it feels like therapy: nothing to say, brain shut down. I looked at that picture above and it feels like my brain. Actually, it looks like my new space! To calm the chaos, I turn everything off. Feelings. Heart. Planning. I know this isn't good. It isn't dealing with the issues that shut me down. That's what therapy is for - to help figure out chaos aversion. Turning in to a robot isn't helpful.

This is really a random post and doesn't feel very illuminating. Must everything be insightful? Thoughtful? Therapeutic? Geez, that feels so tiring. Sometime a nap is more helpful. Or is that robot behavior?