Home of a mother, wife, writer

Posts tagged ‘excerpt’

This is from the WiP I’m doing a read through of before editing. So, the following excerpt is still in first draft mode. This is the first 500(-ish) words of Chapter 2.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Garren drove out to his parents’ ranch after catching a few solid hours of sleep at his apartment. He still had not heard from Connie and had left her another annoying message. Maybe that was why she hadn’t called him back. Maybe his parents had heard something. He certainly hoped so as he parked in front of their house.

He walked into the kitchen and saw his mother in front of the sink. He walked up to her and wrapped his arms around her. “Two days in a row, Garren? What’s the occasion? We never see you this much anymore.”

“That’s not true, Mom. I still come around. When I can.”

She laughed, but he could hear the tears behind it. “I know. I was teasing. It’s good to see you, whenever you come.”

“What’s wrong, Mom?” He asked, turning her toward him. And he saw the tears weren’t just in her voice, but in her eyes as well and streaming down her face.

She shook her head though and waved him back. “No, it’s nothing. I’m just being emotional. I’m sure your dad’s right, and they just decided to stay longer. Probably enjoying their time together and forgot what day it was.”

Garren shook his head. That was even less like Connie than just not calling. “You know she would have called by now, Mom. Connie’s not that irresponsible. Not that inconsiderate. She should have called.”

“I know,” she said and dropped her head to Garren’s chest. “I know that. And I can’t let myself think about the reasons she hasn’t. And I can’t stop thinking about them.”

Garren did not know what to say to her. He didn’t want to lie. And he knew his mother would see right through any he told. And he didn’t want to think about why she hadn’t at least called either. He knew nothing he said would ease her mind until they did hear from Connie.

Garren turned when he heard the footsteps on the porch and tensed as his father walked into the house. He didn’t want to be told he was overreacting or being paranoid again. He saw the lines of worry etched into the older man’s face, and the panic starting to show in his eyes. It only took him a moment to realize what must be going through his head.

The older man’s shoulder’s sagged in relief. “I thought…,” but he trailed off and shook his head. “Are you staying for dinner then?”

Garren knew she needed to hold onto that. But, he didn’t think the call they would get would come from Connie. He had seen too much during his years on the street, even before getting his detective’s shield, to believe it would all turn out just great. He wanted to believe that, but he thought it might hurt more to hold on to that hope.

This is an excerpt from my novella that I am currently editing. It is from the beginning of Chapter 2 and the protagonist, William Jensen has just left town heading back to his ranch after being gone for about a week.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

William stopped beside the stream that he knew meant he had less than an hour to go until he was home again. Even though he was eager to be home, he let the horse have a few minutes to drink from the stream and pull up some grass to eat. While he waited, he pulled out some jerked meat to chew on. It was not much of a meal, but he just needed something to hold him over until he would get a home cooked meal again.

When William figured the horse had enough rest, he swung back up into the saddle. “We’re almost there,” he murmured and kept repeating it as if it was the only think keeping him going. As if he felt his rider’s excitement, the horse picked up his pace. But, as he rode through the gate of his ranch, William yanked on the reins, bringing the horse to a quick stop.

“No.” The single syllable was a strangled sound in his throat that barely made it across his lips.

The house he’d been looking forward to getting back to no longer existed. Smoke still rose from the ashes of what he had called home for just over half a decade. “Anna. David,” he breathed the names of his family. Had they been there when the fire started? He hoped not. But with a lead weight in the pit of his stomach, he started the horse forward. “Please, God, please let them not be here.”

The horse pulled up several yards from the house, stamping the ground and snorting as he threw his head from side to side. William knew the smoke and the smell left over from the fire made him nervous. He slid from the saddle and rubbed a hand along the horse’s neck. “It’s all right, Boy. Stay here. I’ll check it out.”

He left the horse standing there and made his way closer to the house. As the acrid smell of smoke and burnt wood started to overwhelm him, he pulled the bandanna he wore around his neck up over his mouth and nose. And he told himself that the tears pooling in his eyes was from that smoke and not the fear of what he would find as he started through the rubble of what had once been his home.

I am going to start to post a short excerpt(less than 500 words) from whatever I’m working on. I will post this on Tuesdays when I don’t have a flash fiction piece to post. I’m thinking these excerpts will only be from drafts that have been finished. I had thought about sharing one from what I’m working on now, but I feel weird about posting it before the first draft is even done. Today would be one of those days with no flash fiction. So, here is an excerpt from from the novel I finished this past January. This is from about the middle(and almost to the end) of the prologue that I may or may not keep.
***
“He’s not going to appreciate us being here,” Casey said, his gaze skimming the faces in the crowd.

“I know, but we’re just here to pay our respects. We did our job. There was no way to know that homicidal maniac would be able to even find the safe house, let alone get through all the alarms to get to her. And as it is, he should appreciate the fact you could have died trying to protect his daughter.”

Casey shook his head, fingering the spot on his neck where the knife had bit into him not even a week before. Alex was right. He could have died doing his job. But, that did not matter now. “He’s burying his daughter though. What could have happened to me doesn’t matter. Having someone to blame does. Right now, I’m that someone.”

Alex knew what Casey was thinking as he saw the pain in his friend’s eyes as he scanned the names on the gravestones. “Marie was not your fault either, Case. You weren’t even here when she was killed.”

“But, I should have been,” Casey said before stepping away from him.

Casey saw the large man heading for them and braced himself for the attack. He did not have to wait long. “What the hell are you doing here?” Ashton Turlington shouted at him. “You killed my daughter and now you’re here to rub it in my face?”

Casey shook his head. “I did not kill her, Mr. Turlington. The man who did, the man she was married to, is in prison now. I am only here to pay my respects.”

“You can pay your respects by staying out of our lives. Now, get out of here before you bring any more distress on my family.” When Casey stayed where he was, he added, “If you do not leave on your own, I will have you removed.”

It was then that Casey saw the two men behind the oil baron. He recognized them as the muscle Turlington kept around his oil wells to keep any troublemakers away. “We’re not here to cause any trouble. Like I said, we only wanted to pay our respects.”

“You have no right to do that when you’re the reason we’re burying her today. Now, get out. And don’t expect to see any more money from me. You’ve gotten all you’re going to get. And I’ll see to it that no one else has to bury a daughter because of you.”
***
Any thoughts? I’ve been debating about this prologue since I wrote it(and even before that). Still not sure what I’m going to do with it. Do you want to read more excerpts? I am always willing to hear any feedback(as long as it’s not “this sucks. you should never pick up a pen again” kind of thing. ;)).