Alice B. Grist

It's ok to feel how you are feeling. You don't need my permission of course. I just think there is such a massive pressure in this self help / spiritual game to feel happy, or to always be aiming for happy. But how you feel right now is part of that process, it is important. So go easy on yourself.

Allow yourself to process emotions good, bad and indifferent. Try to recognise why you feel how you do. What are they are symptom of? Don't rush past them In the belief that they don't matter. It's an education you must undertake. Having a grump or feeling low, sad are bad are not evidence of soulful failure. They are simply part of being human. And being human is kinda the point right now.

Your unhappiness is real, be with it, aim to learn and grow from it. So feel your feelings. They won't last forever. And they will help make the happy moments, when you reach them, all the happier. Accept your humanity, have a little cry, sulk in a corner, indulge your frustration a little. Allow these things to seep into your understanding so that you can create from a space of truly knowing yourself. It's ok to feel how you are feeling. Check my blog and sign up to my newsletter for regular readings and guidance to you direct!

Ok I'm not going to bullshit you here. Sometimes the death card actually means death. In all my 20 something years of reading cards I've never had this crop up at the time of an actual death either. But today is different...

Yesterday my husband lost somebody and then up pops this card. Not so much an omen, but a startling reflection. The thing with the 'death' card is that it heralds so much hope. Because whilst it can reflect the loss of so much, it also points us to the fact that from loss new beginnings can spring.

With each person that we lose, we are gifted the chance to consider what that person meant to us. To love them for all their good, and to take lessons from their life, apply it to our lives and continue their legacy. And if you are spiritual then death also represents a return home, to the true home, to a place where the aches and pains of body and mind are no longer felt. A place where the larks and jests of earth are relieved. A compassionate, loving place where we feel the light of source pumping through our metaphorical veins.

So yes, sometimes the death card means actual death. But there is no bleakness in that. Only hope and if you want to look for it, inspiration, love, inevitability and release. If you are grieving a death I hope this helps you. With love, Alice

This is relatively shallow but... I remember when I really wanted my long hair back like when I was 17. I didn't know if it would do what it did in my youth. But I kinda opened a prayer to the universe for it. And the universe delivered.

Two kids later and without paying any attention to my locks, it is suddenly precisely how I hoped it would be. A very simple example of how we can accrue those things we wish for without even realising. Make that wish today, then forget about it. Consider this too, what did you dream of years ago that now you have? How far have you come, how much has grown, hair or otherwise?

In this same walk I passed a house which shared the name of a street I used to live on. That was a dark, lonely, weird time. And now i'm elsewhere and its lighter and happier. It is too easy not to recognise the shores travelled to get here. But when I saw that house sign I chose to recognise it. I've made it out of that jungle. What might the future hold? Exciting. What did you dream into being??? Share below!

"I thought that my appearance was what would make my life matter." Geez this was me way back when. Part of me looks at this and thinks wow (the part conditioned by society). The other part knows the inside story. I felt so uncomfortable. Every part of my heart railed against my modelling attempts but for some reason my head kept overruling. I was miserable.

This was my slimmest and whilst I escaped any kind of eating disorders I was on the Atkins diet and felt foggy headed and awful most of the time. I thought that my appearance was what would make my life matter. I don't know why I thought that because at the same time I knew better. Society really pits us against our better selves. Dumb culture as I call it in The High Heeled Guide to Spiritual Living is insipid and can turn you against your own truth. I'd been brought up by goddess worshipping feminist hippies. I know a woman's worth.

And yet I was so keen to barter my flesh because that dumb culture made me suffocate my better self. And whilst there is nothing wrong with modelling or nudity or bikinis, there is something wrong with ignoring the voice inside that knows that beauty is a myth and that our worth is so much more. I don't regret it, it's part of my journey. But for any young girls who may see this, or any women who look and think this is something to emulate. All I can say is, it didn't make me happy. The only thing that did that was an inward search, beyond the flesh and into something far more divine than even flashy pink lingerie! Don't believe the hype. Your beauty is your juicy, loving, bubbly, ever living soul. Oh and even though this was my skinniest I'm pretty sure this is photoshopped. My armpits just never looked so smooth! It's not real. Love is. The voice of your heart is. Listen.

I nearly got my family killed today. Only last night I was remarking to my husband that we should be grateful to be alive. And roughly forty minutes ago I very nearly wasn’t. I would have taken two kids with me and left my husband a lonesome widower. Yes, my gratitude just got amped up a few storeys.

I feel quite the village idiot telling this tale. And I am sure that somewhere on social media, or in someone’s workplace this morning my name is mud. Perhaps the other party in question is receiving tea and sympathy from colleagues about her near miss - as well she might, I hope they bring her chocolate cake. Whereas I’m using valuable child free time to process what the heck just happened. And to open a dialogue about gratitude.

Basically it goes like this. In the car. Not tired, kids not screaming, not distracted. I was actually paying very close attention to the road. So much so that I was fixated on a tractor opposite me at a crossroads. I was overly concerned on whether he was going to pull out at the same time as me. I was so consumed by this that when I pulled out onto the speedy A road, I didn’t see a silver bullet hurtling towards my back end. When I heard the beep, I naturally assumed I’d made a wrong call and the tractor was being pissy. At that point a silver car overtook me close and fast.

It took me a second and then I realised, shit, she nearly went into me. And it’s my fault. And that would have been bad, really really bad. Other than feeling silly. I felt grateful. Thankful she had swift reactions. Thankful that there was nothing coming towards us, so that she was able to manoeuvre around me at the last second. Thankful that we carried on our journey, my daughters blissfully unaware what had happened. Oh goddess yes, that, my daughters blissfully unaware, safe, alive, breathing.

I wish I could thank the woman driving the silver bullet that nearly took us out. What an angel she was this morning. Not only did she avoid the death or serious injury of four people, but she has made me feel just so grateful, so alive.

Often in life gratitude is something we say we have, but actually until aspects of our life is threatened we don’t really indulge it in the way we think we do. As I said, just last night I was spouting platitudes about being grateful to be alive. But it feels very different to live that scenario, even if just for a second on a rainy Friday morning. Digging deeper into that pit of gratitude is a powerful thing. It takes on a multitude of aspects when we are forced to actually confront it.

I’d really love to take this opportunity to start a chat about what you are grateful for? But not in a generic, ‘I love my dog’ kinda way. I want to talk about why you are grateful for the things that you have, or the near misses and curves that have brought you to this moment, unharmed, breathing, comfortable. Let’s amp up our gratitude… Leave your thoughts in the comments below!