Stepchild physically violent with me during pregnancy

Julie - posted on 08/10/2009
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I am 30 weeks pregnany with my second husband's baby. I have 2 sons age 7 & 10 from a previous marriage and the hubby has 1 son age 8 from a previous relationship. When we found out I was pregnant we incorporated all the kids into it and made the transition a positive one. My son's are thrilled to have a baby sister, but my stepson has displayed unacceptable behavior.

The past few days he's become physically violent with me. Two days ago he was sitting next to me and was pretending to hit my belly saying, "I'm going to punch you in the belly." I told him him that wasn't nice and he needed to stop. I looked at his father who saw the event and asked him if he was going to say anything to his son and he replied, "no."

Yesterday, as I was going outside, my stepson ran up and punched me in the stomach yelling, "I'm going to hit your baby." And that he did. My hubby was sleeping and I was late for an appt. and told my ss that his bahavior was not ok and that I was going to talk to his dad when he got up.

After telling his father what occured, his reply was, "What did you do to make him do that? Maybe he wanted to go with you." Um hello, thats not the reply I was hoping for. His father said he wasn't going to address it with his son because it was NO BIG DEAL, and I was MAKING IT MORE THAN IT WAS.

That day I was having bad cramping and spotting, and was told to come into the hospital because there was no fetal movement. It took the tech 15 minutes to find her heartbeat and I was instructed to go on bedrest. for 48 hours. My hubby didn't even go to the hospital with me, he had my ss grandpa watch him and went to work and made me pick up his son when I was released.

Violence is never acceptable, and I will not tollerate it. After todays events, I am shocked and disgusted at my hubby. And after speaking to my ss therapist, she advised me that it might be safer to seperate the ss and I until things calm down. Personally, my car is loaded and I'm waiting the future exhusband to get home so I can get the hell out of here. My unborn child is far more important to me than either the hubby and ss.

I have to do whats in the best interest of my baby, children and health.

Sounds like your husband has lost his mind! I hope your'e taking the therapist's advice and getting yourself away from your SS. If he is doing this to you while your'e pregant that imagine what he might do to an infant. I would have fliped out on that kid and threatened to punch him back and I'm a very patient person.

Your husband needs to step up and be a man and dicipline his son. If not move on. If that would have happened to me i would have given that kid a spanking I don't spank kids but I'm sorry that would deserve one.

First things first, daddy needs to play an active role in your ss acting out. He could be feeding off of some underlying emotions of his father. I don't know the whole story, was this a planned pregnancy?

Without daddy taking an active role, getting your ss to listen to you alone will be a difficult thing. Maybe get him involved w/ name picking, get his thoughts on what the room should look like; might be a start. I agree w/ you whole heartedly, you need to look out for you and YOUR children; if that is the "position" your hubsand is going to take.

This little boys thoughts and feelings, if not addressed, will only become worse once she gets her.

I'm just wondering what the heck your husband is thinking!! Did he not want another child? Anyway, I'm just writing to let you know that I think you are doing the right thing...you have to take care of yourself and your baby.