Married Info

Building a God-Honoring Marriage

No one plans to become a broken family or a miserable couple. We marrybecause we yearn for a life-long, thriving relationship. How can believersbecome intentional about building a God-honoring marriage?

PRIORITY ONE – Discover God’s Design for MarriageWe must understand that every marriage is intended to be a masterpiecereflecting THE marriage between God and His people. Marriage is themost frequent metaphor used in the Bible to describe God’s relationshipwith His people. In fact, writing to the Ephesians, Paul called marriage a“profound mystery” because the man represents Christ, the groom, whilethe woman represents His bride, the church. The marital union of husbandand wife is a sacred reflection of the gospel itself.

PRIORITY TWO: Commit to a Covenant MarriageToday’s civil marriages are much like business contracts—easy to get intoand easy to get out of. God’s covenant with His people was a promise toremain eternally faithful even if His people weren’t faithful in return. Incovenant marriage, both spouses are committed for a lifetime—in sicknessand health, for better or worse. They don’t threaten divorce or consider itas an option.

PRIORITY THREE: Pursue a Passionate MarriageCouples aren’t supposed to just stick it out and find a way to make theirmarriages survive. God calls us to pursue a passionate, thriving marriage.The Song of Solomon expresses the kind of love, joy and celebration Goddesigned for marriage. That passion is built on much more than infatuationand sexual desire. It is rooted in the physical, emotional and spiritualintimacy God created couples to experience as a foretaste of the eternalunity, communion and intimacy we can have with God.

PRIORITY FOUR: Become Heroic in MarriageChrist made the ultimate sacrifice to rescue humanity. Writing to theEphesians, Paul connected Christ’s sacrifice directly to marriage:“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gavehimself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25) and “Now as the church submits toChrist, so also wives should submit to their husbands” (Ephesians 5:24). Inother words, mutual submission to one another requires giving up our owninterests to heroically serve the other person.

PRIORITY FIVE: Fight for Your MarriageEvery couple will mess up. Too often, however, they also choose to giveup. Throughout scripture, God fights for His relationship with Hispeople, remaining faithful in the face of unfaithfulness. He forgives againand again. No couple can avoid strife and arguments, but we can avoidgiving the “devil a foothold” in our marriages by keeping short accountsand quickly restoring the relationship regardless of what happens.

GOING FURTHER - Resources

Recommended Books It Starts At Home (by Kurt Bruner and Steve Stroope) explains whymarriage is a key path of our spiritual formation and providespractical advice for intentional couples.