For better or worse (answer: worse) the Emmys are an L.A. event. A pre-Emmys disaster always makes for good ratings, as the numbers on the Katrina Emmys were the best since 9/11 Emmys. And who are these critics that annually bleat the same damn exact gripe about these damn shows not being “entertaining,” or, even more ridiculously, not “edgy.” Shut the fuck up already, we’re just here to check out Eva Longoria and that’s it.

Love this press release. Way to use Hurricane Katrina as an attention getter for a new magazine rollout event. (How can a “free” event have “proceeds”?) This is for a home & body event promoting another one of these Martha Stewart/Real Simple rag knockoffs that promote stress-free, breezy, color-coordinated better living through common sense and conspicuous consumption. Mainly the latter. But they’re giving away samples and offering free classes and even manicures for the ladies, so maybe load up on freebies you’re in Venice.

This isn’t exactly new news–that Downtown has broken ground on the biggest goddamned shopping mall ever–but for some reason, the People’s Daily Online Chinese (and government sanctioned) website ran this as big news over there. I think you know where we’re going with this.