As verified by multiple eyewitness reports from supermarkets across the Northampton area, the real estate agent and mother of three is capable of scanning the contents of any low-income person’s basket and rapidly identifying those items which people like that don’t need to be buying, based on the products’ nutrition and cost. Additionally, Gaither, 48, is widely regarded as a leading expert in determining which groceries they would purchase instead if they had any common sense or restraint.

‘There’s no reason she should be loading up on those pricey TV dinners if she’s getting the government to pay for it,’ Gaither told reporters at a local Super Stop and Shop, training her prodigious faculties on a welfare recipient using a benefit card in front of her in the checkout line. ‘If I were on food stamps, I’d just buy two whole chickens and a bag of potatoes—you could feed a family for a week on that and still have money left over.’

‘All that junk she’s buying is just loaded with sugar, too,’ said Gaither, identifying with uncanny speed another critical flaw in her fellow shopper’s grocery selection. ‘No wonder her kids are acting out like that.’

Sources said that Gaither, in addition to being a noted scholar of how the indigent squander her tax dollars at the supermarket, is able to detect with astonishing frequency instances in which poor people claim they are unable to pay their own grocery bills yet, seconds later, pull out a brand-new cell phone that’s far nicer than the one Gaither herself owns. Moreover, as one of the most respected voices concerning the poor’s flawed eating habits, Gaither reportedly possesses the ability to instantly assess when people on public assistance keep coming back to the same fatty foods that pretty much explain how they came to look like that in the first place.

I hope you have better sen than to act like the fictional Carol Gaither, but I bet all of us have seen this woman or her ilk on our Facebook friends list, or perhaps in an email forward from a conservative relative. You could send back this article, but they wouldn’t get the joke.

Housekeeping notes:

Please review our About Us page if you need a refresher on site rules, and

We encourage you to use our flag system — if you see an abusive comment, user or post, please flag it rather than replying. We review every flag and take the best action available to us.

If you have questions or concerns about Firedoglake-specific issues, please limit their discussion to Watercooler posts rather than starting new posts or making off-topic comments in others. But remember,

Firedoglake editors and staff are not allowed to comment on any moderation decisions.

The Watercooler is an open conversation. Ask questions, share links and your thoughts.

3 Responses to Monday Watercooler

I worked in grocery for years. One thing I can assure all. As the price of diesel fuel rises, food costs increase. Heck maybe in a consumer driven economy we would have more money to spend if we did not waste so much money using, gasoline? Maybe instead of being concerned about the eating habits of those who receive food assistance not being frugal enough to make dollars count, the concerned citizen should look at the negative consequences of Americans effectively wasting 1.1 billion dollars driving after purchasing 1.3 billion dollars worth of gas, in one day? A few more greenbacks in the system daily might create a little opportunity?

1.1 billion dollars should not be squandered driving in one day. This amount of money should be put to better uses rather than going to a one percent? BTW, nothing living can waste 80% of its stored potential energy when fueling movement and sustain life as folks do when driving?

Welcome to FDL

Sign in with Facebook or Google+

OR use your MyFDL username

Toolbox

MyFDL is Firedoglake's community site. Anyone can participate by commenting on posts or joining groups to find other people in your area. Content posted to MyFDL is the opinion of the author alone, and should not be attributed to Firedoglake.