The life and times of one woman, a remodel, two kids, and a memory of her former career. I ask myself the same questions I hope crosses everyone's mind... Why don't they invent drive thru everythings? What does the term homemaker really imply? When did my wardrobe include spitup?

7/18/09

We had been traveling with our daughters for 10 hours now en route from Baja to our home in Central California. It began with an hour car ride to the airport (but not before we scoured the house where we stayed and packed up our scattered life into two large suitcases right after breakfast). The two hour wait to board our plane, which was delayed. The additional 2 hour wait to board our plane, the two hour flight to LAX, the hour in customs, the shuttle ride to our car, a stop at the evil empire-Starbucks, and then we embarked on the 4 hour drive from LA to home. The kids responded well to our bribery and when all the smoothies, gummy bears and chicle (Mexico gum) had worn off, they finally crashed out in their car seats. The clock read 9:37 pm and traffic had finally disappeared as we barreled down Highway 101 towards home.It's amazing the things you realize when stretched to your limits of exhaustion...Did you know that "In n' Out" is open until 1 a.m. on weekdays? And 1:30 am on weekends? That they also have a secret menu that is not on their order screen with code words and everything? For example, on this particular evening we learned that the football players from Arizona who were crammed into every booth in the restaurant hunkered over mountains of greasy food prefer to order "The Four By Four". An item you will not find on the menu but is, in fact, an actual meal recognized by the Official In n' Out Kitchen. Also known as "The 4x4", this hamburger consists of four meat patties interstacked with four slices of cheese. Another item John and I discovered as the clock neared 10 pm and we scarfed down french fries and coffee in our final travel hours, that today is July 14th, the middle of summer, almost August, nearly harvest, July 14th....July 14th, OUR ANNIVERSARY!!!! Yep, after 8 years of marital bliss, we completely forgot our anniversary with only 2 hours left to celebrate. The things you realize when stretched to complete exhaustion.

7/17/09

After 3 solid weeks of absence in wedding hell and vacation bliss, yo regreso a mi casa, y mi vida. I am hopeful I can muster the stamina to share every detail from the past few weeks. But first, a brief recap of my average day in Baja:Wake up with two kids at my feet and hubby to my left (always tight sleeping quarters wherever we went), be sure to look out french doors to sparkling ocean view. Change out of pj's into bikini, apply sunscreen. Repeat for the two teeny weenies, add extra sunscreen. Coffee and water for me, dry cereal for the midgets. Observe sunny ocean view. Kiss hubby for breaking away for this vacation (thank you!). Observe ocean view. Make pancakes while family swims in pool, observe ocean view while pouring syrup. Finish breakfast, open beer. Sit by pool. Open beer, walk on beach. Open beer, swim in ocean. Add sunscreen. Lunch, more beer (consider tequila shot, refrain). More sunscreen, more swimming. Ride quads to hotel, order signature hotel bar drink, "The Chi Chi", sit by hotel pool while kids swim. Chips, guac, another Chi Chi (Basically a pinacolada in a parfait glass, served with a tablespoon of grenadine at the bottom. This perfect combination looks just as it's called, like a chi chi-a boob!). Quad rides back to house, change into a dry dinner bikini, grab a beer. Swim, eat, watch sunset, sleep. Repeat for 14 more days. Aughh.Interested in proof that a place like this exists? Visit rancholeonero.com for a few pics of the hotel we would visit from our house. Sorry I don't have proof of my own since my lazy ass hasn't downloaded any just yet. All this typing is making me thirsty. I need a beer. More details to follow.

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, champagne in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO HOO what a ride!”