An Englishman went to Spain on a fishing trip. He hired a Spanish
guide to help him find the best fishing spots. Since the Englishman
was learning Spanish, he asked the guide to speak to him in Spanish
and to correct any mistakes of usage. They were hiking on a mountain
trail when a very large, purple and blue fly crossed their path. The
Englishmen pointed at the insect with his fishing rod, and said,
"Mira el mosca!" The guide, sensing a teaching op­por­tu­ni­ty, replied,
"No, senor, 'la mosca'... es feminina."
The Englishman looked at him, then back at the fly, and then said,
"Good heavens... you must have incredibly good eyesight."

An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German were sitting around, and
they started talking about how each of their languages was the most
beautiful.
"Just listen," said the Englishman. "Butterfly."
"Oh, that is nothing," said the Frenchman, "compared to
'papillon.'"
They turned to look at the German, who said, "And what is wrong
with 'schmetter­ling?'"

Two Finnish parliament members woke up in a hotel room. They
had ap­par­ent­ly spent the last night drinking, and couldn't remember
any­more where in the world they were. Kekkonen asked Ahti to find it
out. Ahti wen­t out­side the room, came back and said:

I think were in India.

How so?

There's a sign in the corridor that says:
WC liegt an der anderen Seite des Ganges. (= The toilet is on the
other side of the hall).

A man who speaks no english walks into a clothing store. The manager
comes to meet him and asks what he's looking for. After realizing
that the man does not understand English, the manager begins to run
through every item in the store. Con­sis­tent­ly, the customer says,
"No, eso no." (trans: no, not that.) Eventually the manager comes to
a pair of socks. He points to them and the customer exclaims, "Eso
si que es!" (trans: THAT'S what it is.) To which the manager
replies: Well, if you knew how to spell it all along.....

>What are the Chinese words for going to the beach?
Wai So Tan?

A British ship was in danger, and radioed a mayday signal to a
German port nearby. The British ship's captain said "We are
sinking".
The German radio operator said "What are you sinking about?"

A Finn and a Swede were arguing which ones mother tongue sounds more
beautiful. Since they couldn't find any solution they asked help
from an English linguistic, who asked both of them to translate the
following poem into their own languages.
"An island, island, island of hay, a maid in island of hay"
It was the Finn's turn first. He translated: "Saari, saari,
Heinäsaari, Heinäsaaren Morsian."
Then the Swede translated: "Ö, ö, Hö-ö, Hö-öns Mö." (asta ii pe
bune, verificati in Google Translate)