Boards

I worked in a shop, which happened to be at the top of a hill in Falmouth. For some reason (defying its location on aforementioned hill), the shop started to flood. When the water reached about knee height, the female manager dropped something in the water. We all intuitively knew this was bad, however she ignored our protestations, and put her hand into the water to fish it out. Suddenly, a huge scorpion/lobster type creature with no head, just a raw bloody end full of teeth, bit off her hand, and blood spewed everywhere. It became clear that we had to arm ourselves, but it was too late - the headless scorpion/lobsters had HUGE machine guns, and they were peppering the place. Everyone they hit exploded in a bloody effusion of cooked mince beef, largely from the head and torso. At this point, I realised it was time to go next door to the sandwich shop to get help. However, there I met a lovely man friend, and I thought I'd leave them to it.

Earlier in the week, I dreamt that all my friends had a huge purple rash, but that before helping them get rid of it, I first had to travel the world with a huge purple and green space gun (which looked as though it should belong to Buzz Lightyear) to rid the world of Comic Sans MS, by shooting at all offending signs and placards.

i went into work and my managers found loads of drugs on me. they were initially quite pissed off because they thought it was cocaine but i told them it was mdma. then they were totally fine with it.

then all the seats in work were replaced by sofas so me and the fit girl in work went to have a little cuddle on them whilst listening to fleet foxes (that's why you should always have a chill out/sleep playlist to listen to for when you're asleep).

that I'd met this guy, and some other people but it's hazey now, who was, I think, kind of Fry but smarter in flesh and blood mixed with a guy I knew once, and we were going to form a really good book club but then I woke up. I feel really disappointed that I'm not getting that book club.