Get Lost

I wrote this spring about following my dreams, even if I didn’t know what they were. At the time I felt completely lost, and had just taken a job with a law firm that would never make me happy, for the money, and quit two days later. We all have dreams. Sometimes I think we’ve just spent so little time on them that we may not even know what they are, what they mean, or how to pursue them.

I guess that makes sense, since most of us spend most of our waking day doing something we wished we weren’t doing, leaving us exhausted, with little left to give. So I’ve been thinking that to get to where I wanna go, I’ve first gotta let go of enough of the stuff that’s been dragging me down, to be able to get lifted up when these dreams present themselves. I’ve already got to be the me I want to be. The me that deserves that next awesome thing.

But letting go is hard. Maybe so, but it’s easier than hanging on to a sinking anchor. Which is what sticking with something that’s bringing you down is like. Makes it hard to breathe.

So dream detection. How do I know when I’m on to something, versus just being an idiot? You just know. Ya know? The problem is that we’ve got all these little voices in our heads – our own, our father’s, our girlfriend’s – telling us we’re wrong. Foolish. Unprepared. Under-resourced. Less than capable in some way.

My friend Stephen recently told me about a book that he loves called “The Secret of Letting Go” by Guy Finley. I’ve got about 40 pages left and have thoroughly enjoyed every one so far. If you’ve ever, like me, felt trapped in your own life, this book is a winner. When you open the cover, the first page reads simply: “Nothing in the universe can stop you from letting go and starting over…”.

It really is a wonderful book that beautifully encapsulates much of the Eastern wisdom I’ve long held as truth, and presents it in an easily digestible format. It also, of course, was presented to me right when I probably needed it the most. As “they” say; “when the student is ready, the teacher appears”. So maybe today is your day to get lost too.

I said recently that just because you don’t know where you’re going, doesn’t mean that you don’t know what you want. I’ve always known what I’ve wanted. To be happy and feel like I did my life job. I’ve just been too busy trying to force things to be the way I was taught and thought they were supposed to be that I feel like I almost could have missed the point all together. Wouldn’t that be a pity.

A poem.

oh you pretty thing
found yourself lost in a dream
bought the lie
sold your soul
gave up your rock and roll
now arrived at the end-zone
there you lay all alone
looking back low
no life to call your own

2011’s been a whacky year for sure. And I KNOW it’s not just me. Let’s send it out with a bang and start again.

…and what it all comes down to my dear friends… is that everything is just fine fine fine…