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8.23.2015

[she is 39 weeks pregnant]

How far along: 39 weeksSize: Small ripe watermelonSymptoms: Very achy and tired. Pressure everywhere. And now I'm swelling. I can't wear my wedding ring anymore and I just feel puffy and waterlogged in general all the time. Definitely the most I've ever weighed as well. Prepping for baby: Still trying to gather my anxious mind. Josh has scheduled a lot of a last minute work around the house so the chaos here isn't helping. I know that it will all get done and be so pretty when it's done. I waited to order a few of her non-urgent things because her stroller was on backorder and I wanted the reward points from Nordstrom. So in the waiting, I actually found another stroller in my late night researching that I love more. But since its estimated delivery is too close to when we will be in the hospital, I will just order the rest of her stuff once we get safely home rather than risk boxes sitting on my porch. Our bags are packed for the hospital. Please keep us in your prayers for a safe delivery and healthy baby/momma.

Sleep: Still hard to sleep. Even harder because I get caught up enjoying her late night wiggling. Sleeping on my right side also makes my hips hurt like crazy so I'm mainly on the left most of the night and wake up with crazy sheet indentations on my skin. Movement: Her movements are pretty pronounced to anyone who looks at my belly and if she finds a cozy spot on one side, I'm completely and noticeably lopsided. I am truly going to miss how incredible the movement is.Changes from last week: The swelling is the biggest part. I found the very first piece of jewelry that Josh ever bought me; a little silver and brass "H" ring when we were dating that we fondly called my promise ring. It was a size too large but the only one in the store and I loved it. I had even told him that we didn't need an engagement ring and I would proudly wear this one forever (well, he got a beast of an engagement ring anyway but I really would have worn this one forever). Who could have known that God saw I would need this ring again in the future; that I would need it at the very end of carrying our sweet little girl. I absolutely hate being ringless and this little sentimental ring of metal has fixed that problem completely.Best moment of the week: Final date weekend. Josh and I have been together for over six years (married for almost five of them). That's a lot of time to know, grow, and love each other. I am so glad that we had all those years to ourselves and were able to plan this next chapter of our lives. Word on the street is our lives will be forever changed and we vowed to never lose our roots this weekend. I can only imagine how easy it is to get caught up in our new life of baby priorities but our most loving mentors always advise: God first, marriage second, children third. And not in the sense that you abandon your child for each other but that you love your children so much that if you don't work hard at your marriage, your children cannot thrive like they would in a house built on love. Marriage, like children, isn't easy. But with hard work and commitment they both will bear the most rewarding fruits of this incredible life.

Looking forward to: God breathing sweet life into my baby with the miraculous sound of her first cry. Holding her close, locking eyes with her, and being able to say "I love you" with a power I've never experienced before. Seeing Josh's eyes well up with grateful and joyful tears as he gets to hold his precious daughter for the first time. Getting to know this incredible life God has made - from how she eats and sleeps to how she reacts to everything around her. Watching her grow into the incredible woman I know she will be and being able to share my testimony of God's love with her as she forms her own walk with Him. There's so many things to look forward to, I cannot even put it into words without absolutely bursting into tears like I am now. My heart is full. And my heart has never been more thankful. (And of course, rinse, repeat...) Still every single moment left of this pregnancy. I cherish every ache and discomfort because I realize how fast this chapter has gone and I can't wait to hold my sweet love in my arms but I sure have enjoyed carrying her.

Scripture for the week: God makes His people strong, God gives His people peace. - Psalm 29:11 ---- Worrying can cause straightforward things to be blown out of proportion (my "chaotic" house combined with my impending labor, for example). God is telling me to keep it simple. He has all the strength I need and all the peace necessary for this time. I need to banish fear and unbelief. I need to eradicate negativity. He has made me capable and given me His composure; peace that surpasses all understanding. I need to rest in His promises... Father, I strip away the complicated and get back to the basics. You have made me strong and given me peace. I take that into the labor and delivery of my baby and into my home. In Your Most Holy Name, Amen.