Shoulda, coulda, woulda -- enough with the self-blame already. Whip negative inner chatter into submission with these power phrases.

Why it Works:
It's the weary chugging forward, not the giant leaps -- think The LittleEngine That Could -- that paves the road to success. This simple phrasewill help silence what Laura Berman Fortgang, author of Now What?90 Days to a New Life Direction, calls "heart-stopping fear." So kick a"can" in the face of your doubting inner voice that says, "Who do Ithink I am?" -- or whenever your otherwise-capable feet feel paralyzed.

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Power Phrase:
"I choose."

Why it Works:
Like it or not, life is not happening to you -- it's happening with you."We'll never be without problems, but we choose how we respond tothem -- only we decide where we go from here," says New York City–based life coach Jeree Wade. Bottom line: You call the shots.Reminding yourself of that can make it easier to choose happiness.

Power Phrase:
"It's not too late."

Why it Works:
You feel like you're lagging behind -- reentering the workforce after havingkids, or still single five years past your "must get married by" date. Andthe anxiety mounts when everyone else seems to be shooting past you."Stay in your own life," says Fortgang. "Your greatest success maycome at 60, and you don't even know it." Our favorite late bloomers:Toni Morrison (who didn't publish her first novel, the critically acclaimedThe Bluest Eye, until she was 39) and Grandma Moses (who at 80 yearsold gained international recognition as a folk artist).

Why it Works:
Sure, if only you'd made the cheerleading team in junior high, hadn'tgotten tongue-tied in that meeting with your boss, taken a right turn atthe light instead of a left -- your life would be different. But "different"doesn't mean "better." And that regret you're torturing yourself withisn't doing you any good. "When we're so caught up in our past,or our future, we get stuck," says Fortgang. "But when you acceptwhere you are right now, you can move forward. It's like saying, 'Fromhere, I can stretch. From here, I can grow.'"

Power Phrase:
"My best is good enough."

Why it Works:
Calling all perfectionists! Here's a mind-bender: "You're always doingyour best, even when you're not," says Fortgang. So give yourself abreak. Today, you may be exhausted, fed up, or suffering cramps -- andyour all doesn't feel like much. But tomorrow (or 10 minutes from now,when the Advil kicks in), you may have that brilliant brainstorm, run thefourth mile, or accomplish whatever feat you wish you could realizenow. Your best, and the varying degrees thereof, is infinite, not ultimate.

Power Phrase:
"Stop."

Why it Works:
"Stop" is the ultimate redirect for your brain, says Fortgang. AsWade puts it, you're telling yourself, "I'm not going down that road."And once you do stop, you have a choice: Get back on the well-wornpath of negative chatter, or head in a new direction of positive intention.