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We’re halfway through January… Can you believe it? That means Valentine’s Day is just a month away! I think of Valentine’s Day as the Super Bowl of the Intimate Apparel industry. I can’t think of any other Holiday that almost requires a lingerie purchase, can you?

I’d love to hear your innovative merchandising strategies for increasing sales between now and February 14th. Are you having a sale? Offering a Gift-with-Purchase? An in-store event? Last year, Margo Andros of The Pink Slip in NYC’s Grand Central Station marketed a “Dear John” campaign which targeted the men that frequent her store. She sent out a hand-written note to her best male clientele. Margo recognizes the fact that men appreciate convenience and ease of purchase (especially when it comes to buying underthings for their loved ones!) So she offered three Ready-To-Give “Packages” to remove the guesswork for the fellas, including optional delivery / messenger service. It was genius, and proved to be a real success. What do you have up your sleeve? If you are planning something special, please let me know. I would be happy to post it in my Weekly Column.

Here are a few upcoming “Intimate Affairs” (some of which are Valentine’s Day centric):

Tonight, Bare Necessities is hosting fashion’s first LIVE webcast featuring bra fit experts, sexy models, real-time audience Q&A, and lots of special features (and a viewer-only secret deal). The “Intimate Affair” is being hosted by Bra Fit Expert Freddy Zappe of Eveden and Bare Necessities’ Erin McLaughlin. Log on at 7:00pm EST and use hashtag #BAREFIT.

Linger in Spring Lake, N.J. is hosting the “Linger Mingler,” a Men’s Night Out on January 31st from 6:30-8:00pm. The “Intimate Affair” will feature a LIVE Fashion Show and complimentary cocktails.

The Underfashion Club is hosting its annual FEMMY Gala on Tuesday, February 5, 2013 at Cipriani 42nd Street, NYC. Again this year, the “Intimate Affair” will be hosted by Carson Kressley. This year’s Student Design Contest is sponsored by Penn Asia Co., Ltd., Regina Miracle International Ltd. And Stretchline Holdings Ltd. The theme is “Midnight Garden” – Seduction of Flowers. The Underfashion Club will be presenting FEMMY Awards to Bloomingdale’s, Cosabella and The Lenzing Group, the Innovation Award is being presented to Hautelook, and the Lifetime Achievement Award Recipient is Josie Natori of The Natori Company. For additional information regarding ticket purchase or to sponsor a table or to advertise in the event program, visit www.underfashionclub.org.

Sweetest Sin in Red Bank, N.J. is hosting their annual Valentine’s Day Soiree on Thursday, February 7th from 6:00-9:00pm. You can expect free gifts from brands such as Hanky Panty & Booty Parlor AND the event will feature special guests from LELO, the world’s leading designer brand for intimate lifestyle products.

Last week was a busy one here in New York City. Buyers were in town for Market appointments; and business dinners and other events ensued late into the evening. And it’s not over yet! It seems that the wholesale Market Week is going to last for two weeks this year….. Still lots of appointments on the calendar!

On Wednesday, May 2nd, the Intimate Apparel Council hosted “Retail Mobile Engagement” at the Union League Club, a panel discussion on mobile marketing. The panelists covered topics such as the different types of action codes and how to develop companion apps for iPhone and android platforms. Panelists included Leslie Burke, Director of Interactive Print at Conde Nast, John Puterbaugh, Ph.D, CEO & Founder at Nellymoser, Inc., and Liz Smith, Vice President of Marketing at Wacoal America, Inc. The Intimate Apparel Council is a division of the American Apparel and Footwear Association. Guests at the Intimate Affair included Gwen Widell and Victor Vega of Wacoal America, Steve Chernoff of Rago Shapewear, Joel Fertel of Womens Wear Daily, and the event’s host was Debby Long-Gedney of Biflex (current president of the Intimate Apparel Council,) among others.

Lorna Laurentino

The Fashion Institute of Technology held their annual end-of-year runway show, “The Future of Fashion,” last Wednesday evening. The best work of FIT’s graduating fashion design students was presented in the professional runway show including sportswear, special occasion, knitwear, intimate apparel, and children’s wear. Design student Lorna Laurentino presented in the Intimate Apparel category. Cotton Incorporated presented awards for the “Best Use of Cotton.” Lorna received the 2nd place award for her use of cotton in her designs. The annual event was held at the college’s east side Manhattan “campus” and notable guests included Josie Natori, Calvin Klein and Joe Zee (Host of BRAVO’s “All on the Line with Joe Zee.”) Follow tomorrow’s Intimate Apparel talent today at: www.lornalaurentino.com.

Also on Wednesday evening, International Intimates, Inc. (Rene Rofe) held an “invitation only” Launch Party to present their latest licensed brand, Isaac Mizrahi New York Intimates. The Intimate Affair was held in a Penthouse Suite at the Dream Downtown Hotel. Buyers and media were in attendance…. They enjoyed light snacks and an open bar while admiring Isaac’s Intimate line which places emphasis on body shaping. Isaac himself attended the event along with his design team and executives from the brand’s owner, Xcel Brands. Here’s the “Behind the Scenes” Video of the Isaac Mizrahi New York Intimates photo shoot:

On Thursday evening, I attended the monthly membership meeting of the Intimate Apparel Square Club. Like usual, we enjoyed dinner and discussed Club business. But this month, we were also joined by one of the administrators of NYU Langone Medical Center’s RUSK Institute of Rehabilitation medicine. Pediatric Rehabilitation at the RUSK Institute is the primary beneficiary of the Club. At Thursday’s meeting, we learned how our generous donations directly impact the lives of these children. The institute is currently treating an infant with severe Cerebral Palsy. This disability makes it virtually impossible for the child to function normally. Per special request, a portion of the Club’s funds were used to purchase an iPad for this child. Using a specially designed app, this 20-month old child is now able to communicate with his parents for the first time! This story brought tears to my eyes and reaffirmed my personal commitment to the Club. To find out more about the Club and the work we do, go to www.thehugaward.org.

On Thursday, May 10th, the girls from ILOVEAGOOD are hosting a “Spring Fling” in collaboration with BedHead Pajamas at 252 Elizabeth Street, NYC. The Intimate Affair is a press preview by “invitation only” and will feature fun drinks, great décor, and cute models in BedHead printed shorties. This will be BedHead’s very first New York store!

Bra La Mode is having an Intimate Affair on Saturday, May 12th at Bra Smyth in NYC! It is a “Celebration of Women” in honour of Mother’s Day including An Afternoon Tea Party (and champagne, of course) hosted by Chambre de Sucre Imported Gourmet Sugars. The Intimate Affair is sponsored by luxury French lingerie brand Simone Perele in collaboration with The Lingerie Journal. Our featured guest is Fine Lingerie Stylist and Personal Shopper, “The Lingerie Goddess” Margaret Shrum. Guests are encouraged to RSVP to bralamodemothers.eventbrite.com. Bring Mom in for a free bra fitting, enjoy some scones and tea, receive free gifts with purchase and gift bags AND receive 10% off all Sleepwear throughout the Event. Special thanks to Bra Smyth for hosting the Intimate Affair and to the Event Sponsors and Participants: Simone Perele, The Lingerie Journal, Chambre de Sucre, “The Lingerie Goddess” Margaret Shrum, Naked Princess, Affinitas Intimates, Jene Luciani and The Bra Book, Fashion Forms and SOAKWash.

If you’re “down the shore” for Mother’s Day, stop into Sweetest Sin Bras on White Street in Red Bank, NJ to celebrate “Support Your Girls.” Each year, downtown Red Bank becomes “Pink Bank.” Paint the Town Pink strives to educate local women about a very significant fact that “early detection is a woman’s best defense against breast cancer.” Sweetest Sin Bras is hosting an Intimate Affair which is sponsored by Chantelle Paris on Saturday, May 12th to “Support Your Girls.”

Got Insight? Having an Intimate Affair? Let us know! Everyone can be an Intimate Insider!

October just came to an end, and that means breast cancer awareness month is now over. We had pink ribbons, fundraising walks, and merchandise up to our eyeballs. NFL players wore pink; my hometown of Red Bank, NJ held the “Paint the Town Pink” event and called itself “Pink Bank”. My daughter’s school had a “dress in pink” fundraiser. You couldn’t go to the grocery store or diner without a cheery request for a donation and your name on a small piece of pink paper, for all to see your charitableness.

Sounds great, doesn’t it? It’s a cause that unites all of us – breast cancer is easily a woman’s greatest fear, and we all know someone who has had breast cancer. It’s the one social fundraising cause you can’t object to.

Or can you?

My mom was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 1996. She had a full mastectomy, lymph nodes removed, chemo and radiation. In 2001 she was diagnosed a second time, in the other, intact breast. She opted for a mastectomy over the lumpectomy, because she said she didn’t want to be told she had breast cancer a third time. We joked. She got reconstruction, and after some minor issues with that, went on with her life. In 2004, when my daughter was a newborn, my mom was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. For the last 7 years (my daughter’s entire life), my mom has been on and off chemo nonstop. She has had breaks of maybe 3 months at a time.

In the beginning, we did the walks. We fundraised like mad, we had a great team of walkers and a cute name – Brass Knockers. We walked with a SURVIVOR. We felt sad for those people who’d lost their loved ones, but we were grateful, happy. We were lucky. We bought a lot of pink, breast cancer themed stuff. I had t-shirts, I had slogans. I had the Melissa Etheridge song on my iPod.

By the third diagnosis, the worst one, we were over the pink haze. My mom, my family and I, we no longer fit it. We’re not in the “survivors” camp and we’re not in the “lost a loved one” camp. My mom is literally a breast cancer patient’s worst nightmare. She is a living horror story, a walking, talking worst case scenario. This is no recovery. There is no “all clear” or SURVIVOR emblazoned on the back of her pink t-shirt. She will never be cancer-free and we will never, as a family, have that sweet feeling of relief again. There is only sickness and drugs and trials for her to endure, and years of grief and coping for my dad and me.

Liz and her Mom

There is joy, yes, and gratefulness, and thanksgiving. We thank God every day for every day. But October is a hard month for us. With all the pink waving about, the support for women like my mom and our family isn’t there.

I can tell you what I have learned about breast cancer; early detection saves SOME lives. The “reduce your risks” suggestions don’t significantly reduce your risks. Family history doesn’t significantly increase your risks. Being “strong” or “a fighter” doesn’t mean anything where cancer is concerned. Cancer, unlike everything else, doesn’t discriminate. A woman who “survives” simply had cancer that responded to treatment. There is no way to prevent breast cancer from coming back. These are truths I wish weren’t, because they are hard and sad and make me uncomfortable. But they are true nonetheless, at least for now. Cancer “facts” change all the time, as we learn more from the men and women who lose their lives to it.

Now that October has come to a close, I’m asking you to do something a little more extraordinary than a walk or a dollar donation. I’m asking you to remember the 155,000 women in the United States like my mom. Remember them and their families. Educate yourself on metastatic breast cancer, even if it’s only by clicking on this link – the Metastatic Breast Cancer Network. Spread the word. Use your Facebook status or Twitter to tell more people about the other side of breast cancer. After this month of pink ribbons and survivors and courage, please be aware of those who will never be “clear”, who will not triumph in the way of t-shirts and slogans, but who will live day in and day out, hoping to keep this disease at bay, hoping to feel good for a weekend road trip or a child’s wedding. These stories don’t have a Hollywood ending; they don’t put a happy face on it. But they are real, and they matter.

My mom and I thank you for taking the time to read this post. We wish you a long, happy, and cancer-free life.