June 13, 2011

The "Boneyard".... Not just for dogs.

Oh... I am so happy so not be socializing....

So, I realize that y'all are sick of hearing about our dogs. But at the moment, we're kid-free, so you're just going to have to deal. Okay?...Excellent. (Andrew's Note: If you want, I can talk about the proper way to wear Highland Dress. First of all, when you wear the kilt, don't forget to 23;l534 hey, what?!?ojo4fisdlfkjf309jf3) No husband, no .... Moving on.

Don't you just hate it when people ask you when you're going to have kids? I swear that at least once a week someone at my work asks me, "So... that shirt you're wearing really looks promising!" Really? REALLY???! Just because I like empire cut shirts does not mean I'm preggers... get over it people. I have the ... privilege...!!(?)... ; ) ... of teaching high school band students. They and my 2 dachshunds are my kiddos for now. And while other.... real... parents purchase coloring books and play dough for their kids, I worry about whether the cheap dog food I buy for my dogs will be nutritious enough to sustain them for at least 12 years.... wait, 12 years??.....what the crap??! (We did NOT sign up for 12 years! Cheap dog food! Cheap dog food!)

All this to say, we have it easy. (For the record: The dachshunds peed 2 times this week in the house... not that easy) Dealing with dogs is pretty idiot-proof. This week we decided to spend Sunday afternoon at the local dog park.

Here's the deal with dog parks: If you're dog isn't social (cough.. Chile) ... you (and your dog ) are pretty much screwed. Period. This is Chile all over.
Won Ton, however, has really improved! He'll go up to a group of dogs and like... stand near them! (This is a big deal).

This is Won Ton 'standing near them.' "Hey guys... I'd like to sniff your butt!!!!!

Won Ton: "Hello! Is there a spare section of the Wall Street Journal floating about?"Chile: "How dare you even look at me.... You are in imbecile and I loath the ground on which you tread".

As you can tell, this makes for a rather stressful dog park experience. BUT... no fear, enter the "Boneyard" dog park experience. Thanks to our good friends, the Chenoweths and their dog Walton, dog parks are now a much more pleasurable experience... especially for us, the owners. See, Chile... isn't exactly a social dog. But we're good dog owners and aim to please. Fun + dogs = Happy dog owners! If only it was this easy with real kids. Ha!

And now for a few memorable pictures to document the.... memorable???... experience.

I feel like this picture really accurately depicts the whole dog park experience..."Get me out get me out get me out GET ME OUT!!!!

Ah... the "Boneyard"... lots of tables... lots of space for neurotic dogs..... lots of drinks for neurotic dog owners...

Traitor.....

Dashcuhnds butts!!!!!!! (So lethal) So frikin cute!!

Such a good husband. (I do it for the dogs...you do it for the kids. Isn't that how it works?)No.

Notice the trim waistline: Won Ton has lost a lot of weight (1 lb.) since January. Evidently... the crap diet dog food works.

I will conquer you... tree (couch, kitchen corner... doormat).

Please take me home...

"I just peed on another dog!"

Yay for Karen... the only person patient enough to deal with our dogs....

Karen: "If you do what I say, you'll get a treat".... Won Ton: "Oh... I get it!" Chile: "???"

We love Walton Goggins!... the only semi-normal dog at the Boneyard.

Wait.... Am i being paid to socialize with the dachshunds?

This is on our way home, Won Ton and Chile.... pooped out and ready for a nap.

(By the way, the brightest side to these visits is that the puppies are completely wiped out for the rest of the day. They bury their long puppy selves into the couch pillows and sleep it off. Good times.)