September162014

It could happen to anyone. People bury a person alive to scare them or to get rid of them. In this situation, rely only on yourself.

Do not waste oxygen. In a classic coffin there’s only enough oxygen for about an hour, maybe two. Inhale deeply, exhale very slowly. Once inhaled - do not swallow, or you will start to hyperventilate. Do not light up lighters or matches, they will waste oxygen. Using a flashlight is allowed. Screaming increases anxiety, which causes increased heartbeat and therefore - waste of oxygen. So don’t scream.

Shake up the lid with your hands. In some cheap low-quality coffins you will be able to even make a hole (with an engagement ring or a belt buckle.)

Cross your arms over your chest, holding onto your shoulders with your hands, and pull the shirt off upward. Tie it in a knot above your head, like so: This will prevent you from suffocating when the dirt falls on your face.

Kick the lid with your legs. In some cheap coffins the lid is broken or damaged already after being buried, due to the weight of the ground above it.

As soon as the lid breaks, throw and move the dirt that falls through in the direction of your feet. When it takes up a lot of space, try pressing the ground to the sides of the coffin with your legs and feet. Move around a bit.

Whatever you do - your main goal is to sit up: dirt will fill up the empty space and move to your advantage, so no matter what - do not stop and try breathing steadily and calmly.

Get up. Remember: the dirt in the grave is very loose, so battling your way up will be easier than it seems. It’s the other way around during a rainy weather however, since water makes dirt heavy and sticky.

July052014

July042014

June142014

Europeans: I drove forty minutes to the Netherlands for some groceries
and then I popped into Germany to see some of my relatives before
driving back home.Americans: I was in Florida, I drove for nine hours, now I'm still in Florida.
#australians: i drove for nine hours #now i'm nine hours away from home
#no one is here #the streets are empty #how did this happen #where has
civilisation gone #i am alone in the universe #oh wait no there's an
echidna it's okayCanadians: We left Toronto 2 days ago, We are still in Ontario, food is
scarce. We are lost, soon we will have to eat each other to survive, oh
wait there's a tims we're good.Russians: I was in Yakutia, I drove for twenty eight hours, now I'm
still in Yakutia, I travelled by train for 6 days, I'm still in Russia.
Don't even try to leave Russia. Don't forget: you're here forever.
Accept it and suffer.The British: I drove for six hours, now I'm in the sea.

March242014

October242013

March072013

“Marina
Abramovic and Ulay started an intense love story in the 70s, performing
art out of the van they lived in. When they felt the relationship had
run its course, they decided to walk the Great Wall of China, each from
one end, meeting for one last big hug in the middle and never seeing
each other again. at her 2010 MoMa retrospective Marina performed ‘The
Artist Is Present’ as part of the show, a minute of silence with each
stranger who sat in front of her. Ulay arrived without her knowing it
and this is what happened.”