Several months ago, I thought of a joke that I haven’t had the poor taste to perform, especially since it doesn’t exactly have a punch line. Here’s how it goes:

What the heck do we even know about this Barack Obama? His black half isn’t even American, it’s African. For all we know, his father could have been a slave trader or something. Look at Obama Sr. — he looks like a brother who could own a brother:

Well I was doing some internet surfing, and I figured out why I didn’t have a punch line: because apparently, I wasn’t joking. What follows is an excerpt from a February blog post by retired journalist Kenneth Lamb, whose research was commissioned by what he calls “a NY daily of international reputation,” which is owned by News Corp, so we can guess it was either the NY Post or Wall St. Journal. Mr. Lamb makes it clear in his blog that his work “IS NOT a rehash” of what he terms the “discredited discussion of either [Obama’s] education in Islamic schools, or any other ties to Islam. His religion, and education, outside of citing his Harvard attendance, play no role whatsoever in this article.” With that, I’ll turn it over to Mr. Lamb (emphasis mine):

It wasn’t what I thought I’d find. I documented it, presented it to the Washington Bureau Chief, but was hardly surprised that it never saw ink. As you’ll see for yourself, this is the political equivalent of a nuclear bomb.
…
Why is the fact that Mr. Obama is only 6.25% African Negro not reported?

Because to acknowledge it is to report this devastating truth about him: Mr. Obama is not legally African-American. It is impossible for him to be, in truth, America’s first African-American president.
…
Yet claiming to be African-American is the soul and substance of his claim to fame. It is what he has used throughout his adult life to distinguish himself from other competitors. It is the ethnic identity he proclaims, and it is the ethnic identity he craves. Without it, he is just another mixed race Caucasian Arab with an African influence playing on his skin’s pigmentation.

But no matter what he craves, no matter what he has used to propel himself through life, no matter the racist presumption of seeing his skin and without question calling him black, the hard, cold, genetically inarguable reality remains: he is not an African-American.

Mr. Obama is 50% Caucasian, that from his mother. What those who want Mr. Obama to write history by becoming “America’s first African-American president” ignore is that his father was ethnically Arabic, with only 1 relative ethnically African Negro - a maternal great-grandparent (Sen. Obama’s great-great grandparent, thus the 6.25% ethnic contribution to the senator’s ethnic composition.).

That means that Mr. Obama is 50% Caucasian from his mother’s side. He is 43.75% Arabic, and 6.25% African Negro from his father’s side.

Put another way, his father could honestly claim African-American ethnic classification. He was the last generation able to do so.

Sen. Obama could honestly say, “My father was African-American.” Racist presumptions led an Ivy League admissions committee, and lazy “newspapers of record” factcheckers, to presume that if his father is African-American, then Sen. Obama must be African-American also.

But it doesn’t work that way. Racist presumptions coupled with sloppy vetting don’t turn a lie into the truth.
…The question no one wants to answer - particularly Mr. Obama and his supporters, is, “Why do you think he has an Arabic name? Why does his father have an Arabic name? Why does every ancestor on his father’s side have an Arabic name?”

The answer is obvious: They have Arabic names because his father’s side of the family tree is Arabic.

Need proof? Research the Kenyan records for yourself. You will find that his father was officially classified as “Arab African” by the Kenyan government.

But in America’s current political climate, that truth is heresy; that truth is “an inconvenient truth.” It is the political equivalent in our time to what Galileo’s scientific pronouncements were in his time: it is true, but nobody wants to know the truth because the lie is so much more comforting.

That is why detractors of this truth will do everything to denounce it, except submit to the discipline of actually researching it.
…The further effect is that Mr. Obama would have to convince Americans still reeling from 9/11, Afghanistan, and Iraq, that now is the time for America’s first Arab-American president.

We all know what chance that has of succeeding.

Of course, that would only happen if Mr. Obama told the truth about his racial composition. To tell the truth means Mr. Obama will have to admit that which he has never been forced to admit before, even in the face of the massive lies of his autobiography: Mr. Obama’s entire projection of who he is, and what he is, is a lie.

Mr. Obama would have to say to the world…”I have lied all during my life to play the race card, and use it, cynically, to advance myself by playing upon the racist presumption of Americans to accept, without question, that anyone of color is African-American. I lied to you, and you blindly accepted it, because of your own racist presumptions about color, and ethnic identity. I looked African-American, and your racist presumptions told you to believe it.”
…
Here is the truth about Mr. Obama’s name, and his father’s ancestors:

True Negro tribal members of western Kenya where his father was born have Christian names, not Arabic. His father’s decision to name him with an Arabic name is a matter of his father establishing his ethnic identity in Africa - it is done deliberately to separate him from the African tribes. He may live among them, but he is not one of them. His father’s message is that he is Arabic, not Negro.
…Researching his roots reveal that on his father’s side, he is descended from Arab slave traders. They operated under an extended grant from Queen Victoria, who gave them the right to continue the slave trade in exchange for helping the British defeat the Madhi Army in southern Sudan and the Upper Nile region. Funny how circular is history; now the British again face the Madhi Army, albeit this time Shiite, not Sunni, as in nineteenth century Sudan.

But telling America’s black community that while their ancestors were breaking the shackles of slavery, Mr. Obama’s ancestors were placing those shackles upon their wrists would hardly play as an Oprah Winfrey best-seller.

Being the son of a poor Kenyan goat-herder plays much better than being the son of a highly placed Arab-African who operated at the top of the Kenyan government following his education at Columbia. You see, even the way he portrays his father is a lie.
…
Mr. Obama has struggled all his life trying to prove that he is black enough to be called black.

The truth is that if Mr. Obama is elected, his primary ethnic composition is Caucasian, but of course, that carries no cachet.

So if we look at his next predominant ethnic component, Mr. Obama would be America’s first Arab-American president. The truth is that his name says it all.

What amazes me more than anything else about Mr. Obama’s heritage is the unwillingness of anyone in the journalism profession to want to know the truth. While all this is easily documentable, it is so radioactive that no one wants to be on the receiving end of the racist charges that will bombard whoever broaches the truth…

Barack Obama is the Left’s perfect stealth candidate posing as a “liberal” when in fact he is a hardcore totalitarian leftist, a cultural Marxist, and is made of the same anti-American and anti-Israel stuff that generally comes with that. All while wearing the ultimate cloaking shield in the guise of the “African-American”. How many people would dare attack the “African-American” president even with honest and valid crticism? However, if Mr. Lamb is correct, Obama can not rightfully claim or use this protective shield.

On the other hand, no worries: Muslims/Arabs are supposedly “the new black man” anyway, so actually Obama would be doubly protected. In fact, it may help him if he came out of the Arabic closet.

On that note, I still haven’t come to terms with Muslims being the “new black man” in America. After all, I don’t recall black people committing terrorism left and right, nor the non-terrorists among them tacitly condoning such acts. But if Muslims are the new black man, why are so many blacks converting to Islam? Because they didn’t feel black enough? Because they can’t get enough of that ethnic profiling stuff? Because it doubles their victim status? Because they don’t like Jews or dogs either? Or maybe they just got tired of having music in their lives? (It’s all fun and diversity until you can’t shake your ass to hip-hop anymore.)

On interracial dating, black people came up with the saying: “Once you you go black, you don’t go back.” Well see what happens when they go Muslim and try to go back. “Once you go ‘new black,’ you can’t go back.”

Oh wait a second — I know why so many blacks convert to Islam! Mr. Lamb’s research and analysis gave us the answer: They must want to get in on the Muslims’ lucrative African slave trade!

In case Obama’s occasional Muslim-ness in the past didn’t, this research certainly does lend some subtext to Obama’s gravitating toward the church that he chose: an angry, anti-white, anti-American, anti-Israel church that thrives on taking offense and admires Louis Farrakhan — indeed most of the ingredients needed for a radical mosque. Just like Islam appeals to black anger, black anger appeals to Islam. There is a confluence there. Could the spark of Islam within Obama have been what attracted him to this mean-spirited “church”?

We’ve all heard of the “October Surprise” before a November presidential election. This year, if Obama wins, we shouldn’t be surprised if there’s a December Surprise: a conversion — and with it America’s first Muslim president.