I am not a dedicated raider, but I love raiding. Since I can never commit to the raiding schedules that guilds require of their raiders, I am in a constant state of pugging. When I'm not actively in a pug, I am scanning the trade channel looking for one that will have all the qualities required to be successful- gear, experience, patience, and maybe a little bit of luck. When I find such a group, I'm ecstatic. But more often than not, I face group after group of impatient, inexperienced, and under geared scrubs who simply want to be carried to the final boss so they can get their [EPIC LOOT] Those groups often end in a way that everyone who has ever pugged is familiar with- people getting frustrated and leaving. But every now and then, there is a group that fails so bad, the fail is almost a win, in and of itself, for being such a unique level of fail.

Those are the groups this blog is about.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

There are groups that are so fantastical, it's like those little walkways in the airport. You just sail along, zipping past the people sitting waiting for their planes, and blasting past the people stumbling around while texting on their cell phones. It's like being on the fast track to awesomeville. With lots of purple loot waiting for you at your destination.

Then there are groups that also feel like being on one of those walkways.... if it suddenly and sporadically switched between running forward and running in reverse.

Sometimes, there are groups that are a combination of both, combining both good people and bad people. You stick with it because the good outweighs the bad, or the goods just get sick of the baddies and vote them off the island.

This is a story about voting a retardadin off the island.

I jumped into a nice little pug on my shaman healer. I'm heirloomed, the tank is heirloomed, I think a couple others were as well. The run started with a collective /facepalm when we all loaded into gnomeregan. We bounced on over to the first boss and giggled a bit as somebody died to a cave in after the little gnome yelled out "OMG RUN AWAY!!!". After that, the retardadin began to make himself known. He lagged behind us to do something(no clue what) and died when he got lost. Then, he started needing on everything. My curiosity was peaked when he needed a stam cloak, but being a pally, I assumed it was for os. Then I watched him need a spirit hat.

Oh yes.

You know shenanigans and drama ensued.

Now, trust me, I do understand they're crappy little greens. There's is no denying that. And hell, nobody in the group even needed them for upgrades. Had we won a greed roll, we all would have probably vendored them asap. But, considering the previously demonstrated uselessness of this individual, and the fact that he displayed no remorse or willingness to change his erroneous ways, a kick was as appropriate as it was inevitable.

I'd like to go on to /cheer at Zagat - Silver Hand server. I completely agree that tanks and healers don't have to put up with any bullshit from dps, and I'm usually the one to say that to them(you beat me to the punch) Some people bitch and moan and tell us to get off our high horses, but they can go ahead and kiss my horses ass. The reality, whether dps likes to admit it or not, is that the ratio of healers and tanks to dps is such that the good ones really don't have to deal with any crap. We can replace scrubs in the blink of an eye. Scrubs have a much more difficult time trying to replace us.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Somebody mentioned that I hadn't posted any new blogs lately. They then went on to optimistically ask if I hadn't run into any terrible groups lately.

I can assure you all, that is not why there haven't been any recent posts. I just haven't played recently. Had I played, I guarantee I would have encountered a shitty pug. They're not exactly a rare spawn.

I just haven't felt the urge. And when I have logged in, I run smack into a city filled with alliance scum, and a guild that makes me want to /headdesk. I've decided that with my playtime about to become incredibly limited, that I actually want to enjoy myself all the time when I'm logged in, not just once a year. So I'm gonna be gradually moving my toons over to another server where I can play with some of my RL Blizzcon friends.

Friday, January 7, 2011

So I had another fantastically fail pug yesterday. Unfortunately, it wasn't quite so fail that it was a group that required me to leave and re-queue. So I stuck with it.

Our makeup-A fresh, bright faced DK tank, a rogue, a warlock, and a huntard. Imma stress that last one. A huntard was in that pug.

Our instance- Grim Batol, regular mode. I don't know why I'm still doing regular's- I have more than sufficient ilvl. I just worry about running into a group that fails as hardcore on heroic and they currently are on regular. After last nights group, however, I think that I am just about ready to move on to heroics.

We started the run off with the tank running headfirst into the first pat without any cc. And without moving the adds out of puddles that buffed them. We managed to kill them all(surprisingly) and then the first rogue bailed. At that point, while we're waiting for another dps, the huntard threw a trap at the next pull while I was still drinking. The DK then compensated for a pull without a full group while the healer isn't topped off by throwing down DD in the middle of the group. For those of you not familiar with Grim Batol, the second pull without CC looks like this:

About halfway through it, the dps spot got filled and we got another rogue. Somehow, even with DD up, mobs were breaking loose. It might have had something to do with each dps targeting a different mob. But I'm just a healer, what do I know? Anyhow, we managed to survive that one as well. If a GM had been watching, he probably would have banned us all for hacks, cause there's no way we should have survived.

Next pull... Again, while I'm drinking. I had gone oom the previous pull(doh!) and was at like... 25% when the huntard lobbed another trap and the dk dropped another DD. Awesome. I continued drinking until the dk's health had fallen as far as I was comfortable with then jumped into combat with 60-75% mana and healed them all up. The drake run.... Ugh. I dunno who was doing it, but somebody was wasting hits on the groups that nobody ever clears, leaving other groups with lots of delicious hp.

Ok, so the run continued like that. It was terrible. First boss we managed to take out without... too much of a problem. Second boss, though. Second boss is where my left lower eyelid really started to twitch. The huntard was kind enough to explain that when the boss pops his shield, people need to attack from behind, but neglected to explain the rest of the fight. I'm just thankful he didn't pop his mace out and roflstomp the group. The huntard was also then kind enough to stand in a cave in. THE ENTIRE FIGHT.

I did what any mana conscious healer in cata should do: I let him die. To be fair, the boss had maybe around 25% hp left, and I was confident in the other dps's ability to bring him down. So yeah, I let the moron die.

Sorry guy, I didn't have enough spell penetration to get through the rocks that were falling on your head. Mybad.

He then sent me a nice little tell-.

Yeah. Imma get right on that

This guy then kept up the "Heal me" mantra the rest of the dungeon. Too hard for him to eat when he see's me drinking after a pull. Any heals beyond that point were accidental aoe heals intended for other party members, and a topoff before bosses, which the group then proceeded to pull while I was still drinking from toping them off.

Third boss- The huntard again provided an awesome and elaborate explanation, detailing every aspect of the fight.

Uuuhhhh... What about the puddle of evil goop that you're not supposed to stand in?mmmmm. so awesome.

Nevermind. I see the group wants to stand in the goop for that sweet buff it gives. OH! And not kill one of those "he really hits hard" adds. Two party members died that time, the huntard and the rogue. I didn't mean for them to die, but I was really busy spamming everything I had on the tank who was standing in a puddle of the dragons awesomesauce.

The dungeon carried on and finished with more of the same. All in all, it was an INCREDIBLY long dungeon. And because of it, I didn't have time to run another one and get badges for my paladin. But, on the plus side, my mood was improved just by the single "oops" I gave. I was considering tossing in the "spell pen" comment that I tagged to the picture above, but decided against it. It still makes me lol though.

In other news. I am redoing my UI and will post a screenshot when it is completed, along with a list of addons used and detailed instructions on how to achiev the same. Then I'll be submitting the whole thing to wow interfaces UI of the week thing. Hopefully get some more traffic, since the whale shark guide wasn't up to par for mmo champions guide contest.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

So today. I ran into a go-guy. Normally, they sit there and say "Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!" incessantly. I can ignore them and carry on the dungeon at my own comfortable pace. This go guy was different. Huntard type. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Todays adventures started with me logging my priest and getting stuck with a dungeon already in progress. The tank oulined what CC was to happen, placed marks, everyone said they were ready. Then we waited. I'm not sure what for. The tank might have been waiting for the dps to cc pull, and the dps were probably waiting for the tank to pull. After a couple minutes of us starring at the mobs, and them starring back, the druid decided to run up and root the square. The blue square. The blue square that the tank had previously outlined as the hunter responsibility.

The mage then tried very hard to sheep the skull, which is immune to CC. The hunter dropped a trap, at his own feet. And the tank... *sigh* the tank sat there. And sat there. And sat there. As we are all running back from the graveyard, the tank suddenly pipes up with "sorry guys, my kid needed to go potty."

Thanks, dude. You coulda just said "afk" and saved us that unnecessary wipe. The rest of the run carried on like that. It was terrible.

Ok, so my fuse was already short. back to the Go Guy.

I queued up for a random with my tank. Man. My tank so needs ilvl gear and to get into heroics. Seriously. Everytime I'm on my priest, tank gear drops. And whenever I'm on my tank, caster and dps crap. RNG sucks. But I digress. I queued up and got stuck with another dungeon in progress. I zoned in. Grim Baton. Thankfully, not in the middle of a pull. I examine my group for CC's- Boomchicken, warrior, hunter, shammy. Ok... so- trap, hex, and that one tornado thing druids can do. Not to bad.

Fíx from Arthas

I looked at the pull in front of me to start putting marks. All mobs- full health. I figure, maybe they missed that one. I check out the next pull. Full health. I check out a group a few pulls down- full health. I turned around to look for the dragons- gone. I seriously don't know what the fuck they were doing while riding the dragons. The scenery isn't that damned amazing. So after facepalming, resolving myself to a VERY long run, and turning back to the group in front of me to decide CC and marks, the Go Guy makes himself known.

Another facepalm, then I ignore him and get back to choosing marks.

Lo and behold. The huntarded Go Guy decides to randomly throw a trap into the group.

My resolve crumbled. I turned tail and ran out of the dungeon. I can generally tank and heal oops. I can occasionally tank and heal WTF?! also. But I simply refuse to tank and heal stupid.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Most of these bosses has fairly simple mechanics: move out of fire(or other random puddles of evil goop) move away from adds, kill targets in order of A,B,C, move out of more fire, or goop. Most people have got it down. We have relearned that fire burns and that goop will melt our faces off, even though it's on our feet. We've learned that when we're not the tank, we shouldn't be provoking critters in dungeons, lest they come and smash us with a with a [Can-o-Whoopass]

But it seems, even quite awhile after cata release, that scrubs are still scrubs. (Bringing more proof to the fact that you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a damned pig) Even after a fight is explained, carefully outlined, there is always that one guy who refuses to follow a simple mechanic.

"Run away! Run away, run away, runaw-!" KABOOM. "shit."

Worse than not running away from a mob that will blow you to smithereens upon contact, is running two meters. TO THE HEALER. Seriously. This terribad. He didn't run from the first one. Got blown up. THEN. The next one he runs to me, and stands there till it blows us both up. I tried to run. But by the time I registered that he really was actually that bad, I was already burnt to a crisp.

We survived. Then this tool had the nerve to post recount like he was a badass and leave. Total scrub. Guess what, Aveera from Kargath, NOBODY FUCKING CARES. If you can't follow a simple mechanic, you're a hindrance, not an asset.