Posts Tagged ‘airport’

Smuggling drugs is one of those strange things we all know is a bad idea, but at the same time, still seems reasonably sensible.

I know that doesn’t make sense but bare with me.

Smuggling drugs is bad because if you get caught, your totally fucked. And you get someone’s hand up your bum. Double lose.

What’s more, its not one of those crimes that can be classed as “white collar” or a moment of madness or greed like online fraud or stealing from the cash register. It means you went somewhere, bought a massive fucking pile of mind-exploding substances and then tried to take them somewhere else, with the intention of both getting totally blasted off your face and making a pretty penny at the same time.

But that is exactly why it seems such a good idea as well. What other crime can you make thousands and thousands of pounds simply by transporting something from one country to another? And what crime also promises that if you are successful, you can celebrate in face-melting style by using some of your cheap cheap ‘import’.

Why, I fancy doing some smuggling right now!

Unfortunatly for Chris Lewis, he obviously fell into this trap and got totally busted. With £200,000 of coke. Whoops.

Chris Lewis is a successful English Cricketer for those not in the know and whilst I’m sure he isn’t rich, he isn’t I’m sure by any definition ‘dirt-poor’ like most drug mules. Almost certainly the man has a serious white powder addiction and I’m not just saying that because he’s big and black. Not all big and black people have coke habits you know. Just look at Barack Obama. His dad didn’t.

But either way, cricket and drug smuggling is a bizarre clash of recreational activities – let’s hope Chris doesn’t spend the rest of his days being hit for six in Brixton showers.

The beginning of a short series I shall be running after neglecting my blog for awhile due a lack of inspiration. The plan: Choose a topic (the theme being my disgust for said topic) and then write. Then submit. No spellcheck. No readingthrough. Just raw, uncensored hate. Apologies for the inevitable language. Dickface. People with […]

A game for all the family! Gather round, gather round. It’s the start of a new and exciting year – 2009 to be precise. What will happen over the next 12 months? Hopefully something exciting. But one inevitability is that this year, people will die. 😦 I know, quite a depressing thought. So, to lighten […]

Top 5 Things to Forget About 2008 5. Britney’s Comeback I think the world was a slightly more interesting, and also morally superior place, when Britney was the laughing stock of celebrity culture, barred from seeing her kids, in rehab for alcohol, depression and anger pretty much simultaneously and with her career obliterated into teeny […]