It's been said that our bank account and our calendar show where our priorities lie. Does your calendar reflect that your marriage is a priority? So many people go forward in life assuming they have decades to go. It’s easy to get into a “We’ll fix it when we have time” mentality, but this type of thinking can be toxic in marriage. Here are a few steps you can take to be proactive in your marriage: Avoid procrastinating So many times we find ourselves in a difficult season. It’s easy … [Read more...]

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few weeks ago, I wrote a post talking about the gift of rest and enjoying time with family. It’s a great goal, but it’s often easier said than done. I know that all too well. I’ve struggled with my whole life with the idea of resting. I’m not one who finds it easy to sit and do nothing. I started working for a lady down the street when I was probably 12. I had my first summer job at 15, and I worked weekends in high school and around my classes in college. I spent many summers swinging a … [Read more...]

Debt is a fact of life for so many these days, but it doesn’t need to be. From school and cars, to credit cards, so many of us have accumulated a crushing mountain of money that we owe to others. Much of the debt we have begins before we get married, and we bring that into our new marriages with us. For Jess and I, on the day we got married, that number was just over $43,000, all in student loans. For the next few years, we paid the scheduled payments of about $500 a month and would pay a bit … [Read more...]

If you could choose one word to describe your past year what would it be? For us, it would be the word faith. The past year has been filled with chaotic purpose and deliberate decisions. If you would have asked us in our first year of marriage if we would be doing what we are doing now, we would have thought you were crazy. A Voicemail and an Email It really started when Adam had applied for a job this past summer that we were pretty certain he was going to get. He was well-qualified, made … [Read more...]

Rest. It’s an important part of life. Without sleep, we stop functioning well. Without mental rest and time to unplug, we can end up struggling with burnout, overload, and anxiety. Thankfully, we have days off in our week, and extra days off as holidays. Jess and I have to remind ourselves to take this time of rest. We have a tendency to fill our schedule and push forward when we know we should slow down. Even with good things. We are constantly in a state of learning that we need time to … [Read more...]

Are you stressed about the idea of planning holidays with your family, your spouse’s family, and also wanting to have your own traditions? Family expectations can lead to quite a bit of frustration. Honestly, I never really understood how holidays could be stressful or difficult until I got married. With the words “I do”, I suddenly had more than myself or my family to think about. I now had to think about my husband’s family, and also the fact that Adam and I were now our own little family, and … [Read more...]

The year is 1519. Hernán Cortés and a crew of 600 men had just landed on the shores of Mexico. Their mission was simple: To conquer it. Many better-equipped armies had failed before them, but on landing, Cortés gave an order that was brand new. “Burn the boats,” he told his men. As they watched the boats burn, a new resolve was cemented in their minds. They would conquer this new land, or they would die trying. There was no other option. With this resolve, they went on to achieve victory in … [Read more...]

What is rest and why is it so important? In Genesis 2, God had just finished creating the earth in six days. On the seventh day, he rested, blessing that seventh day and making it holy, because it was on that day that he rested from all His work (Genesis 2:2-3). Why did God rest? He didn’t rest because He needed it. He took time to rest to show us that we desperately need it in our lives.
The idea of rest is a difficult concept for me. I’m a driven person and have trouble when I don’t feel … [Read more...]

Did you know that on average women live longer than men? This is true for most countries around the world. Most people just dismiss this as a statistic, but there’s actually wisdom here worth acting on … [Read more...]

Have you ever felt alone? It’s not fun, especially in the hard seasons of life. In contrast, have you ever had someone walk with you through hard times? Ecclesiastes 4:12 talks about the benefits of not walking alone: “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” God has designed us to walk through life with others … [Read more...]

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About Us

Hi, we’re Adam & Jess!

Our marriage got off to a rocky start in 2014 and quickly escalated to a full-out crisis. Jess left just five months into what we thought would be our happily ever after. We spent the next couple years in marriage counseling. We read every book and took every class we could find to save our marriage, and while it was absolutely worth it, it was a ton of work.

We're so glad you're here! We wrote this course to share what we learned on our journey in a simple, easy and clear way. Our hope is that you'll take our stories, failures, and successes and use them to make your marriage the best it can be!

Adam has an MBA and Jess is currently pursuing a Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. We live in San Jose, California and are members of Church on the Hill.