Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Last week, we, the good people of Et tu, Mr. Destructo?, were pleased to help launch the premiere of "O.T.P. (One Term President)," the debut rap of Wolverines, a group of people who probably doubled their number of faithful listeners when their case was assigned to a Secret Service agent.

The group took their name from the American insurgents in the delusional right-wing fantasy and unintentional comedy classic Red Dawn. This seems only fitting, because, as we explained, these people are homophobic, racist, loathsome and insane, on loan to freedom from World Net Daily, the internet's #1 resource for Birther conspiracies and trying to figure out how the Toyota recall fits into the bigger picture of America's takeover by the New World Order. These are also the sort of people who would grow a skullet, wear a black bandana, dye a handlebar mustache and spray paint "nWo" on people's backs to protest the NWO and think it makes sense.As said, these people made a rap. It looks like they accidentally popped a game into their Xbox called "RAP HERO" and got confused because when they mashed buttons, black people were making music instead of getting blown away all tidy-like. If you asked them what "flow" is, they'd assume it had something to do with cleansing the lower 9th Ward. Unfortunately in rap there are consequences. One of them is that—unless you're Puffy—when you suck at it, people who know what they're doing get to use you as a punching bag. For instance, an MC might notice that:

Like it or not, hip hop clawed to prominence from a minority culture, and attempting to co-opt its sound to further an agenda that actively works against that same segment of America is ugly and brainless. Also, these kids rap like a fucking Fruity Pebbles commercial.

So in the interests of fairness, we'd like to turn the mic over to the MC who made that observation, Satellite High:

I have no control over that. I didn't record a thing (although I'm takin' credit for "White check, white check/is this thing brown?"), and that's all Satellite High's doing. He basically wrote the piece based on my review of "O.T.P.," so I figured the least I could do was try to pimp his stuff out as much as possible and give people some context. Admittedly, that draws attention to me, too, but I thought it would be cool to have a one-stop shop that explained the track and also had links to SH's Youtube channel, site and Facebook page. That's the whole of my involvement here.

I loved how the video pulsed and throbbed when it focused in on a sign that mentioned Hitler. I know that I also pulse and throb a lot whenever I think of Hitler who was, of course, the original Grandmaster Sexay.

Third Reich + mega-bass sub-woofers = we'll be riding panzers into Moscow by the end of summer, tops. Awwwwww-yeaaaaaahhh!

Et tu, Mr. Destructo? is a politics, sports and media blog whose purpose is to tell jokes or be really right about things. All of us have real jobs and don't need the hassle that telling jokes here might occasion, which is why some contributors find it more tasteful to pretend to be dead mass murderers.