CRAPITALISM features 27 chapters on 27 different cronies who turn their political access into crony-fueled profit. The book has been barely out a week and Mark Levin has already hailed it as “outstanding” and “substantive,” urging his radio audience to grab copies fast.

But rather than go through all 27 names (you should do that yourself!), here are 7 explosive revelations from CRAPITALISM that will leave you mad as hell.

Got an alcoholic beverage ready?

Maxine Waters

As Mattera writes, Rep. Maxine Waters of Los Angeles has carved out a reputation “as the congressional equivalent of your kooky uncle and the most ridiculous cast member from one of those ‘Real House’ of Crazytown shows.” But in reality, he notes, Waters figured out a way to hitch a ride on the American taxpayer and bring her family along for the ride. In order to be featured in one of her election mailers, you gotta cough over big bucks. In fact, because Maxine issues endorsements via a mailer, there isn’t a contribution cap as there is with a traditional political donation. So who runs the mailer? That would be her daughter, Karen, who’s raked in hundreds of thousands of dollars over the years as a result. Then there’s Maxine’s grandson, who was her longtime chief of staff (nah, no cronyism there). And it was Maxine’s grandson who helped orchestrate a special taxpayer bailout for a minority-owned bank in Boston that his grandfather (Maxine’s husband) just happened to own upwards of a million dollars worth of stock. I know, what a coincidence.

Jay Z

Not only did Jay Z partner with a real estate developer to help swindle New Yorkers out of some $750 million to build a glitzy new arena in downtown Brooklyn (read all about it!), but the self-appointed best rapper alive invests alongside a man who has been under several federal and state investigations. That man is David Rosenberg, and his Ohio-based collections agency has been accused of abusive tactics, including trying to secure money from individuals who had already resolved their debt. Rosenberg’s company has been involved in dozens of lawsuits over these illegal shakedowns, settling many of them. Remember Rosenberg’s name the next time Jay-Z shows up at an Occupy Wall Street rally or goes on TV to feign outrage over the plight of the working man in America.

John Doerr

John Doerr is Al Gore’s business partner, and like Gore, believes that we’re on the precipice of global warming Armageddon. And also like Gore, Doerr’s solution to this alleged “crisis” is for the government to “invest” in “clean tech” companies that – wait for it – he just happens to invest in as well. As Mattera notes in CRAPITALISM, sixteen green energy companies that Doerr backed received lucrative government subsidies. One of those companies, MiaSole, a solar panel manufacturer received $102 million in tax credits from the Obama administration. MiaSole was eventually sold for a meager $30 million to a company in that clean energy oasis known as China. You may have heard of them. The scary thing is that Doerr still considers himself a “raging capitalist.”

Zygi Wilf

He’s the owner of the Minnesota Vikings, a team worth more than $1 billion. And, reportedly, so is Zygi. But that didn’t stop him from fleecing taxpayers to the tune of $498 million to build him a brand-new stadium for his football team. As one state senator noted, the taxpayer subsidy is equivalent to $72 per ticket, including the pre-season, over 30 years. Oh, and while Zygi was shaking down the good people of Minnesota for their hard-earned money, homeboy was out buying a co-op in NYC on Park Avenue for… $19 million. Must be nice.

Sally Susman

As the chief lobbyist for the drug manufactuer Pfizer, Susman – an Obama bundler – helped with the PR blitz to convince Americans that Obamacare was the right prescription for healthcare. It turns out that Pfizer, prior to Obamacare, was in bad financial shape. The increasing availability of generic drugs was hitting their bottom line. Moreover, their patent on Lipitor was expiring, the cholesterol drug that had been a significant cash cow for them. But now with most healthcare plans mandated to cover name-brand drugs (at Pfizer’s urging!), the company’s prospects are looking up. And so are Susman’s. She recently cashed in on $4 million worth of Pfizer stock. You and I get stuck with a miserable and oppressive law, however.

Elon Musk

The real-life Tony Stark has an ability to gobble up taxpayer money at almost supernatural speed. Musk’s electric car, Tesla, is largely profitable because successful automakers in the state of California must buy clean air credits from green companies like Tesla. You know, because of global warming and white liberal guilt. Then there’s his other company, SolarCity, which pretty much admits in their SEC filings that if government subsidies for solar installation go away, well, then so may they. If that weren’t bad enough, the U.S. bailout of Tesla that Elon pleaded for early on in the Obama administration happened around the same time a firm in Abu Dhabi, Aabar Investments, purchased a large stake in Tesla. At the time, Tesla was experiencing financial troubles and needed help staying afloat. Aabar Investments eventually sold its stake in Tesla for a whopping $113 million.

That leaves us two ways of looking at the U.S. bailout of Tesla, writes Mattera:

As the head of the Export-Import Bank, you could call Hochberg the “drug dealer” for corporate welfare. He ensures that taxpayers are exposed in order that big businesses like General Electric and Boeing can have access to government-subsidized customers overseas. But, as Mattera reveals often, Crapitalists also get their loved ones hooked up with taxpayer cash as well. Hochberg is partners with the artist Tom Healy. Not coincidentally, Barack Obama appointed Healy to the prestigious J. William Fulbright Foreign Scholarship Board where he is treated to taxpayer-funded hopscotch around the globe to promote cultural dialogues. Healy also gets compensated at the GS-15 rate, which is the highest in government.

And that’s only the beginning. CRAPITALISM pulls back the curtain on 27 different cronies ranging from big-box retail to Wall Street and everything in between.