Monday, June 9, 2008

Good, but the Worst of the Four

WARNING: Indiana Jones 4 Spoilers in this post. If you plan on seeing it, and haven't, don't read!!!!!

When I'm wrong, I'll say I'm wrong. I may just have been real wrong here. The last time this sort of thing happened it was like 1999, I believe. I went to the theater and watched 'The English Patient.' I walked out of there hating-- scratch that-- loathing that movie. I don't know whether it caught me on a bad day, or I was expecting more than I got, I don't know. The two weeks following, I began to think about the movie. (This one had already won Best Picture and gotten the rave reviews by the time I took my turn so I had high hopes and when it didn't deliver, I couldn't help but think what went wrong.) Well the more I thought about the story, the film, the characters, the more I realized maybe the film was OK and I had just experienced it during two bad hours of one bad day. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Finally, I snuck out of work and went back to the cheap matinee to watch again. I loved every minute of it the second time around. In fact it still rests on my Top 20 of all time and I own the Deluxe Edition DVD that gets watched at least once a year. (I also watched it 5 times in the theatre total. Sorry, I was a film geek and with a Student ID we went to films for $3.00 and $5.00 anytime in LA.)

There has only been three times in my life that this little belch in perspective of a film has occurred. Pulp Fiction, The English Patient and now…. YES, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

To refresh you, Raiders rests at the 1 movie of all time in my book and was the film that started all this ridiculousness for me. So best believe, twenty years in waiting from 'Crusade' to this one…. My hopes were high. I watched the film with my buddy Doug, and I could tell half way through he was miserable. I on the other hand, felt that there were massively cheesy excerpts, but I kept an open mind and didn't let the cheesy one liners and transparent plot twists deter me from enjoying the film. But as the film creeped into its final act some shananigans happened that made it hard for me to keep a positive perspective. First, Shia swinging from the vines with his monkey cousins following him, coincidentally helping wreck the bad guys? C'mon man. And then, freaking Lucas you asshole…. You just had to do it didn't you? Isn't there enough starships and freaking space pods in your other franchise? You had to go ahead do it here and Speilberg, don't think you are in the clear here with your 'Close Encounters Ship' replica showing up to offer a "corridor" at the end of a INDIANA JONES MOVIE!!!!!

OK, so with that crap said, I left the theatre hurt, broken, and betrayed from what I had seen. I was so hurt in fact that I vowed to never speak of Indy 4 again. Well, two weeks has gone by and I haven't been able to take my mind off that film. The more I think about the film the more I feel I gave it a spiteful impulsive review, because honestly, cheesy one liners and stale references of Indy adventures past, I had a good time and that honestly is what Indiana was all about. I had originally predicted that this film would be good, but the worst of the four and that to me was a dead on take of Indy 4. If I completely block out Jones Junior swinging from the vines with the monkeys and the Close Encounters mother ship barreling out of the Amazon Jungle out of my head, I can actually retort my original review and say, "It was Indiana and that's all that matters." It will not get a spot in my Top 20 nor will say it's gonna' be a movie I'll make time to see again in the theater. I will own the Deluxe Edition DVD and I may just go buy the Barnes & Noble Graphic Novel, (I own the previous three films comics as well.) I will just stop reading after the big Jungle Chase and I'll make sure for the DVD that my player's remote is fixed by then so I can hit stop about the time Shia is sprung up in the tree after fighting off Cate Blanchett's Russian Antagonist character on the back of a Jeep.

A Note to George: Dude, a spaceship does not belong in an Indiana Jones movie. Get off your high horse. That stunt nearly crushed a young kids' dream and aura of the Fedora and whip…… NOTICE I SAY, 'NEARLY.'

The Best Film of All Time

16th of All Time (Mostly because it's Indy)

In the low 30s... Until now was the worst of the three.

Fun. Good. But like I said, the worst of the 4 and not planted on SSG's list.