What doesn’t kill you makes you funnier

Recently, I realized a major occurrence: I’m still alive, which in a sense is quite a miracle.

Since I survived many emotional breakdowns, physical crash-downs, natural disasters as well as personal (and family-related) major health problems, I consider myself a lucky person (I thought of another word in this place, but changed my mind due to the fact that coarse language might not be the best choice for a G-rated article).

What prompted me to write the following story has its origins in my recent re-evaluation process that started on the day I turned 40. That number didn’t seem frightening a few digits before, yet, in reality, it turned out to be the scariest thing since Scary movie No 5. It literally terrified the socks off me when I discovered that life could be an ultra tricky thing, putting you through tests that you never even thought possible (and surely didn’t think yourself capable of surviving, at least in your mind).

There was the Berlin Wall falling when I was residing as a foreign student in former West Germany (well, it didn’t fall on my head, so that’s alright). There was the flooding when I was studying for my master’s degree. I helped after hours by putting sand bags around the endangered areas to prevent gushing (as a result we started to drink bottled water instead of tap, so that’s not all too bad). There was certainly the hailstorm in Sydney, Australia, with droplets the size of golf balls while I was writing my Ph.D. thesis as the roof crashed down (ok, I admit it, that’s quite major, but I managed to escape the storm with only minor injuries, so I guess that’s ok).

Yet, none of those fateful incidences came close to the ultimate test I was to face. The most challenging life lesson came rather unexpectedly in the form of my not-as-fresh-as-a-daisy health issues and my mom’s brain tumor.

I don’t think that anybody is prepared to experience the most challenging time of their lives by watching their loved ones brush with never-ever land. Witnessing the people you love with one foot on the other side (I’ve already lost my father at a very young age, which was quite an unsettling experience) can make the strongest person weep and freak out. While I don’t want to go into details of how I almost lost my mom, I’d like to indicate at this point that it traumatized me for life. Plus, it’s doubly tough when you’re in the middle of menopause at the age of 38, while taking care of young children at the same time.

Funny enough, what I thought would have made me a bitter, disheartened and downright hostile person (again, I will refrain from using a bad word here although I’m quite tempted to do so) made me rediscover laughter. I have to confess it’s a rather curious thing that a dramatic situation can make us catch up on lost-along-the-way humor and make us roll in the aisles again in an unexpected manner.

As Erma Bombeck once said, “Laughter arises from tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.”

There is no better quote that would sum up my life’s journey at this point.

Owing to tragedy, I began to laugh at myself, the way I view the world and the whole emotional misery thing. And while it didn’t help me fix my heartbreak, it surely helped me see the world differently and make fun of it. It even let me add another language to my resume: I’m fluent in sarcasm now, so that makes it the sixth language I can speak.

And while I can’t say I’m grateful to life for putting me through all of this, I’m definitely thankful for one thing: It made me funny as hell, and it didn’t kill me!

— Abby L.

Abby L. is a former Ph.D. student and lecturer of European studies at the University of McGill, globetrotter and mom of 7, who is blogging at www.midlifecrisisnut.com about (you’ve guessed it) midlife crisis, turning 40 and living as an expat in France. She’s contributed to Midlife Boulvard.com, shewrites.com, blogher.com and bloggymoms.com.

Erma says

“Do you know what depression is? It's sitting in your doctor's examination room. In a paper dress. On a cold table. And it's the high spot of your week.”
(from "Dumpy Paper Dress--March 31, 1977," which appears in Forever Erma)

Who's publishing what?

Musings

Kaye Curren has written her first book, Memories A La Carte, Essays on a Life. In these selected humorous and heartfelt essays, Ms. Curren relates what it’s been like to be a woman living, growing and surviving in America in the latter half of the twentieth century and beyond. From childhood in sunny California to retirement in snowy Michigan, Ms. Curren has survived depression, divorce, failed opportunities and financial insecurity — and has lived to laugh about them. She delights in writing humor essays, human interest stories and memoir. Find her many musings on her website/blog at http://www.writethatthang.com.

Perfect lipstick

Diane Pascoe has published a collection of hilarious personal essays, Life Isn’t Perfect, But My Lipstick Is: Real Life. Real Laughs. Her funny memoir “collects the mental musings of a wife, mother, and (sometimes) gracefully aging woman.” She lives in North Carolina with her husband, Eric (also known in these stories as “Honey” and “Love God”) and their two dogs.

Idaho potatoes

Bestselling author Elaine Ambrose offers two new children’s books featuring Idaho potatoes, creative stories, and vibrant illustrations. Gators & Taters features seven original stories with four in prose and three in metered rhyming poetry. The book is one of 50 children’s books selected for Bowker’s National Recommended Reading list. The Magic Potato is a creative, educational, bilingual story book that was approved by the Idaho State Board of Education for the statewide curriculum. The read-out-loud story describes in English and Spanish the adventures of children who ride around Idaho on a magic flying potato.