Sunday, August 14, 2016

The way we deal with grief has a lot to do with whether or not the grief
heals and strengthens us, or ends up depriving and starving us. We’ve
learned a lot of things about grief over the years, like that strong
“grin and bear it,” stiff upper lip response to grief which involves
denial, and is not an optimum strategy for dealing with a mourning
period.

My own reaction to people that are grieving is to really give them a lot
of support in grieving, and letting the process run its course. That
means not just the grief of the loss of the person, but the grief of the
loss of any dream in life, of anything that you’ve invested that was
lost. There is a reaction to a loss that is a grieving process, and if
you don’t deal with the grieving in a way that is true to your being,
it’s untrue. It’s just as untrue to grieve when you’re not feeling it,
as to not grieve when you’re feeling it.

“Spirituality means to detach from thoughts so that we may perceive the
nature of the being. When the mind silences, the being shines. As this
occurs, we see ourselves as fragments of light. This light that we are
divides into different rays that are expressions of the self. Within
these rays, we naturally find the essence of forgiveness, gratitude and
selfless love. This is the true nature of the self.”

In
Zen they say that you have to ask with the pores of your skin and the
marrow of your bones. A Zen saying points out: Great questioning, great
awakening; little questioning, little awakening; no questioning, no
awakening.