I ask myself that question, quietly, on occasion, when I’m looking over my seven-year-old’s homework and identify something he might not have done quite correctly.

“Matty, are you sure about this one?”

“Yes, Dad. I’m right.”

“Hmmmm, I don’t know. What about this?”

“Dad, you’re wrong. Look!”

And I’m wrong. Just like that, I can no longer achieve a perfect mark in Grade 2.

Now, you could just chalk that up to me perhaps not focusing. We adults are distracted, right? Can’t always be on the ball, right?

But Tuesday confirmed for me that it’s a good thing I finished high school, because I would clearly struggle if I had to go back and do it all over again. The smartypants in Grade 5, Izzy, had her French play. She was Papa, a poor sucker who gets taken advantage of by his naughty children. They replace his shampoo with caramel.

* shakes fist at naughty children *

The play was very funny. The girls, who all combined to write the script, were fantastic. But I realized, as I sat there smiling and laughing and nodding, that I had little idea what they were saying. That for all the years of French immersion and Alliance Francaise classes and trips to French-speaking places, I was lost. The 10-year-olds? Not so lost. The 45-year-old? Smiling and laughing and nodding and, frankly, edging into senility

Are you smarter than a second-grader? Maybe, just barely. Are you smarter than a fifth-grader? Are you kidding me?

But — aha! — do I ever know my sports! Here’s the 2 O’Clock:

TALKING THE TALK, WALKING THE WALK

Richard Sherman, the oft-controversial and outstanding cornerback for the Seattle Seahawks, has signed a four-year extension and is now booked to work for the Super Bowl champs through the 2018 season.

He announced the news on his blog today, and was classy about it. I was interested to see that he had no hesitation telling people exactly what the terms were, since athletes usually won’t bring up the numbers. Sherman, brought up in a working-class household in Los Angeles, is guaranteed $40 million, which is quite lovely news and makes him the highest-paid CB in the NFL.

And here’s some nice timing, with the start of the NFL draft on Thursday: a Sherman spot with the Oberto beef jerky people:

Frankly, I’m delighted for Sherman. I’m intrigued by athletes who are complex people. Sherman’s a complex person who also knows how to put bums in seats, who knows how to endear himself to those crazies down the I-5 who pack CenturyLink Field. Here’s hoping he has a long, outstanding career.

WHO ERRED ON HAIR DEBATE?

Fascinating story last week about the baseball coach in Pincher Creek, Alta., who asked his teenage player to cut his hair.

The kid, Liam Nazarek, didn’t want to. After all, he was growing out his hair for a cancer charity; that hair would end up being cut off and made into a wig for someone who’s had the misfortune to lose their hair.

But the coach, Bryan McKenzie, had his rules. And he wasn’t going to bend his rules for Liam.

So Liam’s mom recorded a nice little chat she had with the coach.

Now, the former pro pitcher Dirk Hayhurst has weighed in. And it appears he’s siding with Coach McKenzie, who Keith Olbermann highlighted in his regular “worst person in the sports world” feature. But Hayhurst also isn’t too happy with Liam’s mom, and thinks this could set off a wave of angry-parents-who-are-going-to-get-back-at-the-coach videos.

As for Olbermann, you have to take what he says with a grain of salt. After all, you’ll recall he said the Canucks’ Tom Sestito was one of the sports world’s worst people (about two minutes into this video):

Although you do have to give Olbermann for referring, two minutes into this next video, to John Tortorella as the “soon-to-be-ex-coach of the Vancouver Canucks.” Intriguing call to make in mid-January; it took the Canucks three-and-a-half months to get that done:

INDEED, NETS MIGHT BE NUTS

When, among other things, you put out a newspaper, you hope that the people doing the editing and the layout take that extra five seconds to make sure everything is good.

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