"There you go, Madam. Thank you." said my master as he picked up my bowl and me to a young woman.

"Thanks. But can you do me a favour? Please tie a bow around the bowl. I want to make it look like the perfect gift." said the woman and handed me back to my old owner. He tied a red ribbon around
my bowl.

"Thanks again. My fiance will love it!" said the woman. She picked up my bowl and walked to her home. Once home, she placed me on a small table. Then she smiled.

"Hi, fish!" she said "I'm Jessica! This is your new home now! Do you like it?"

I looked around. On the walls, there were pictures of Jessica with a man. The house was colourful and smelled like flowers. I liked it. So I started swimming in circles and Jessica giggled.

..................

That evening, Jessica was sitting in the living room when the front door opened and a man entered.

Jessica loved me very much. Kevin went to work everyday so it was just her and me. She would decorate the house, cook dinner, wash clothes and feed me. And when she would be finished of work, she
would sit close to me and I would swim in circles. Jessica was a kind, cheerful and pretty woman. I loved her very much too.

..................

My life was going perfect until one night. One night changed everything. It was midnight and Jessica was worried because Kevin had not come home yet. Kevin always came home in the evening. So
Jessica was terribly worried.

"Oh, fishy. I miss Kevin. Where do you think he is?" She asked me. She sounded like she was about to cry.

Then suddenly the front door burst open and Kevin entered.

"Kevin! Where were you?" cried Jessica "I was getting so worried. I........." she became quiet when she saw Kevin's face.

"Kevin....." she murmured "Were you out drinking.....alchol again?"

Kevin didn't even reply. He started to walk away from her but Jessica grabbed his hand.

"Answer me!" she screamed.

Kevin pulled his hand away.

"Get lost" he said and started to walk away again.

"Kev! You promised! You promised you won't drink again!" Jessica cried. Tears were flowing down her eyes.

"Shut up!" Kevin screamed sudddenly, turning around to face Jessica. Then he pulled something out of his jacket pocket and thrust the thing into her stomach. Jessica gasped. And then fell on the
ground and died. A piece of glass poked out of her body which Kevin had used to kill her. Kevin stared at the body for a while, panting, and then fainted.

.....................

Kevin woke up three days after that night. And the first thing he noticed was Jessica's body.

Great discovery. From its start to end one has to concentrate fully on the words to understand the real meaning. Perfectly told in those few lines. I have also written some stories and would like your views about them. Ab tu ghabrake ye kehtain hain ki marjayenge, marke bhi chain na aaya tu kidhar jayenge.(that is the best shair i remember for your story).

AuthorReply

Comment | 19 words

Mon, October 22nd, 2012 7:24am

Thanks so much for reading. And very good shair. I should hang onto it because I'm terrible at poetry! :)

I like this a lot. I just about lost it laughing when the fish said that humans are the strangest creatures ever. I know that was probably not meant to be funny, but it is true. I like knowing that I'm not the only one who writes from animals points of view. I just wrote from a mouses point of view. Mine wasn't as.. disturbing.. as yours was though. It is true though humans are like that.

AuthorReply

Comment | 83 words

Thu, November 29th, 2012 12:48am

Hahahaha. Actually I wrote it after I noticed my own fish after fighting with my parents. You see, we had a fight in front of the fish and then I spent so much time crying, but then I thought "what does that fish think about us?" so I just made up this story. Yes, it's disturbing, but it's not meant for younger readers in the first place. Thanks so much for reading and I'll make sure to check out what YOUR mice think! :)

This was absolutely brilliant! I could see exactly what he room would look like, the situation. Such an interestin story. In the eyes of a fish. I cannot express how much I like this. It is quite true, too. Bloody brilliant, my friend. In such a shor stor, you grabbed my attention and amazed me. Great job!

AuthorReply

Comment | 33 words

Fri, January 4th, 2013 12:49am

Oh my God! That's so sweet! Your comment totally made my day! It's so nice of you to check in my work. Thanks so much. I'll get to your work soon. I promise. :)

AL QISSATU AL QASEERATU JAYYIDATUN WA JAMEELAH- UHIBBUHA- If you didn't understand it, no problem. I like it, due to the strange way of narration. Thanks! IN TUHIBBU AL LUGHATAL ARABIYYAH, FA UREEDU AL KITAABATA FEEHA- A ANTI RAD-IYAH? Well, I'll try with arabic letters, but I'm not sure. Tell me what you understand...

AuthorReply

Comment | 40 words

Tue, May 14th, 2013 6:17am

Uh......eh I got nothin. You know, I just understand Arabic because it's closely written like Urdu. But yeah, I can get a bit of words but I can't form a sentence without looking at the original text. :( I lose.