Never Date the Wrong Man Again After 50

Life in the Boomer Lane used to conduct workshops for older singles. They were packed with transforming, life-altering information about creating relationships. In her workshop introduction, in which she introduced herself as a writer, speaker, and workshop leader, she often mentioned that she was recently remarried. At that point, most of the hands shot up. The question was always the same: How did you meet him? In other words, Just give me the place/site/whatever and get me out of here.

The truth is that, often, without a change of attitude, and, without information, no place/site/whatever will result in a meaningful, loving relationship. Many singles spend their time choosing unwisely, then wondering why their relationships don’t work. Relationships will continue to be unsuccessful, unless we step back and take a hard look at who we are, what we really want in life, and have a better understanding of who men are and what they want in life.

Enter Lisa Copeland, the Relationship Guru. Lisa spends her life training people to have what they want: lasting, loving, healthy realtionships. Her website, Find A Quality Man, is packed with information. In addition to personal coaching, she offers free teleseminars. Her latest Never Date the Wrong Man Again After 50, will be held on Tuesday, May 19.

Lisa is real. She is over age 50, she has been married and divorced, she has been through the singles dating wars. Instead of becoming bitter, she took a long, hard look at what she was doing that didn’t work, and came up with a method that would. She changed her own life and she has been able to change the lives of countless others.

So, hey, what do you have to lose? The teleseminar is free. You might actually learn something. Listen, and then let LBL know how it went.

Renee, given that we men are fixer uppers, not dating the wrong man after 50 seems aspirational. Maybe dating a man with the least baggage is more pragmatic. Truth be told, what couples should be told by a minister, counselor or confidante is relationships are hard work and if you are not prepared to put in the effort, then maybe you should think more than twice. There is an old saying, “opportunity is missed because it is dressed up as hard work.” The same could be said of good relationships. Sorry to wax on. BTG

I chickened out. I did take one of her quizzes and aced it, though, but that’s because I seem to have learned the fine art of manipulating men, I suppose. Her stuff just seemed too much like “let’s get a man and here’s how you play at doing it.” Bleah. I’m either destined to meet the love of my life or not, though my own means. The thought of all she was suggesting scared the living daylights out of me.

Thanks for the feedback, Rebecca. As with anything else in life, no one answer works for everyone. My own frying pan-over-the-head moment cam when I realized that my life was great with or without a man, and as soon as I became unattached to results, dating became fun for the first time in my life. Eighteen months later, I met the man who would become my second husband.

Life is too short to date the wrong man, and it’s even shorter after 50. I’m so grateful that I’m not “out there” anymore. I met my husband taking dance lessons. I was having fun whether or not I met anyone and now I have someone to cha-cha with for the rest of my life.

I’m an opponent of systems. I work with 50+ widowed and divorced women. Some of them need confidence building and others need confidence deflation (hence my no-magic-bullet philosophy). The greatest barrier to finding the right partner is resolutely holding out for your opposite number – the person who embodies the right mix of qualities (as check-listed by you). A narrow search for Old Mr. Right obscures the value of developing friendships with men you never want to be permanently paired with, but who are pretty okay as human beings. Spending time with such men will, if nothing else, ease the stress of a resolute search that too often turns frantic when the perfect match doesn’t materialize soon enough.

Right on target. Most people narrow their possibilities before they even start. I wouldn’t have dated Now Husband unless I decided to bypass two of my own requirements. But, as you said, they have to be OK as human beings. or me, that means possessing integrity and authenticity.

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