Friday, April 16, 2010

More Big Government On The Way!

The next person who says our Dear Leader, Chairman Obama is not a socialist, I am going to personally hold them down and tattoo his latest, frightening quote to their forehead:

"If there's one lesson that we've learned, it's an unfettered market where people take huge risks and expect taxpayers to bail them out when things go sour is simply not acceptable."

Never mind the fact that our less than illustrious Messiah voted for the bailouts when he was a part-time Imperial Senator, we've all learned to expect, and in some circles, accept his Ingsoc-like changing of truths. What bothered me was his use of the word "unfettered". Um, Barry The Magnificent, when in the hell over the last 100+ years have we ever had "unfettered" capitalism ? Ever since your Progressivevik ancestors emerged from the primordial ooze of failed European political theories, we've had nothing but "fetterred" capitalism, often with disastrous results, like oh, I don't know, the Community Reinvestment Act of 1977.

Now, don't get me wrong: we actually do need financial regulation. So, here it goes, and I'll even keep it under the 1900+ pages that is Chris Dudd's Frankenstein monster of a bill:

If a corporation does something stupid, it dies like an old person waiting for medical care under the Obamacareless plan. The federal government won't give them one dime, just like it won't let Grandma see her 89th birthday.

Any CEO caught screwing the public should be forced to view pictures of Ed Schultz bathing Keith Olbermann while wearing a French Maid's uniform. That, I can assure you, would scare anyone straight.

Seriously, it's that simple.

What our Dear Leader and his socialist allies like Chris Dudd and Barney Fwank don't realize is (cue nolstalgic Reagan music): Government is the problem. Anytime in the last 100 years we've had any sort of financial meltdown, there's always some bureaucrat shrugging his shoulders and saying "Did I do that ?" The problem is when Urkel said it, it was in a moderately funny way. When Barney Fwank says it, it means your pension and life savings are gone, like my faith in the government.

Under Angelo's BFF's scheme, Big Mommy would set up yet another government agency that would watch the evil capitalists and force them into bankruptcy if they're deemed "too big to fail." Naturally, this wouldn't be how the agency will be used at all, it would be used as a compliance mechanism to force corporations to do the government's bidding. If you think crony capitalism is ugly now, wait until corporations become yet another tentacle of the federal government.

Gee.....where have I heard of a system like that ? Could it be.....Socialism ?

Even if you're a little skittish about laissez faire capitalism, consider this: corporations are always at war with each other, like the Oceania/Eurasia/Eastasia three way dance. Only the strong would survive in a true laissez faire system. The weak would either fold or be bought out by the strong, thus eliminating the need for bailouts. When a company becomes too big, it will crash and burn under the weight of its own bureaucracy, thus eliminating the need for any stringent financial oversight. That's the beauty of true capitalism, it polices itself.

I'm going to appeal to the Republicans in Congress, although I'm fairly certain to be disappointed yet again, fight this with everything you have. Fillibuster. Name call. Be obstructionist. Give Moron Dowd a nervous break down, I don't care. Whatever you do, you must fight this tooth and nail. If financial reform passes in any way, shape, or form, free market capitalism will no longer exist in the United States.