As part of an ongoing campaign to convince everyone to quit being Catholic, an Italian priest used his annual Christmas message to expound on a very Christmasy topic he'd spent many years studying in Priest JuCo — domestic violence. And like most instances when a celibate male Catholic official comments on what women should or should not be doing, it was epically stupid. His advice? Basically, ladies, if you don't want your husband to kill you, then you should probably stop dressing like such a skank.

Of course, he didn't say "skank," partially because that word was barred from sermons by the Second Vatican Council's Twat Accords, the same rule that allows priests to space out during mass sometimes and imagine who they'd have sex with if everyone who wasn't in church suddenly died and they were responsible for repopulating the world. But the main reason the priest didn't use the word "skank" is that Father Piero Corsi preaches in the Italian village of San Terenzo di Lerici, and thus used the Italian equivalent of "harlot" or "harridan" or "slattern" or "stank bitch" or whatever in his Christmas Day message, entitled (shitting you not) "Women and Femicide, How often do they provoke?"

Here's what the BFF of Christ had to say to his female parishoners, according to Reuters: that ladies must use "healthy self-criticism" to examine why so many women in Italy are abused/murdered, and that women's dress and manner is to blame for "provoking the worst instincts [in men], which then turn into violence and sexual abuse." But the cherry, so to speak, atop the shit sundae: "The core of the problem is in the fact that women are more and more provocative, they yield to arrogance, they believe they can do everything themselves and they end up exacerbating tensions." Just look at them! Walking around and having breasts, hips, and butts. Who the Sam Hill do they think they are?

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The offending remarks were written down and tacked up on a church bulletin board, apparently because Corsi didn't have the stones to look actual women in the face and say what he really thought of them. In the message, Corsi blamed all manner of problems on immodest women refusing to properly obscure their sex-parts— from poorly kept houses and understimulated children (I mean, have you ever tried to scrub grout or teach children the alphabet in a skintight bandage dress and 7-inch-heels?) to our old friends rape, domestic abuse, and murder at the hands of their husbands. Merry Christmas, whores!

Thankfully, since Corsi posted his misogynist rantings in easily capturable form, pictures of the message quickly went viral. NPR reports that Corsi's holiday tidings of great what-the-fuckery were met with anger and backlash in his home country, which bears the dubious distinction of having the highest domestic violence-related murder rate in Europe; thus far in 2012, 118 Italian women have been killed by their husbands or partners, and some international organizations estimate that a third of Italian women will be the victims of serious domestic violence in their lifetimes.

A pretend-chastened Corsi issued an apology, and for awhile there was confusion about whether he'd remain a priest or if he'd resign to pursue freelance jerk opportunities. He's dismissed rumors that he's leaving the Church, however, saying that he's still got important work to do. Which is true, since he hasn't yet laid out an argument that implicates children in their own sexual abuse, and that's the last square on the Asshole Bingo Card he needs to fill out before he wins a free Sharper Image massage chair.