10 Dec The Dirty Dozen: 12 Signs of Self-Sabotage (Part 2)

Let’s continue reviewing the Self-Saboteur’s Dirty Dozen—12 behaviors that are sure signs of self-sabotage to your success. In today’s edition, we review numbers five through eight.

How many are you guilty of?

5. Inability to Admit Mistakes or Errors

All too often, people believe that admitting they are wrong shows weakness or ineptness. The danger of this belief is that it backs you into defending poor choices even when you know you have made a mistake. The inability to take responsibility for one’s mistakes leads to blaming and finger pointing. There is no power in playing the victim. If we want to be genuinely successful in both business and life, we need to recognize our missteps so that we can correct and get back on the path to achieving our goals. A willingness to honestly and humbly admit to a mistake allows you to establish trust with others and creates an opportunity for growth.

6. Having Unrealistic Expectations

Unrealistic expectations can leave you feeling constantly let down and frustrated. Although high expectations might make you feel like nothing ever goes as planned, low expectations can lead to giving up before you even start. So what can you do to keep expectations from sabotaging you? Easy: Get rid of them altogether. When we fixate on a specific outcome in every situation we encounter, we are bound to end up disappointed. Things don’t always happen the way we expect; sometimes they turn out even better! Letting go of expectations creates space for more possibility and less disappointment.

7. Critically Judging Ourselves or Others

Judgement is crucial to our survival. It helps us discern what is safe and appropriate as well as what is not. However, too much judgment is guaranteed to sabotage your success. Self-criticism leads to negative thought patterns, self-doubt, and anxiety, which can prevent us from taking the action to create the lives we truly desire. We are human, and we all make mistakes. Instead of beating yourself up over every little thing, practice being compassionate and forgiving toward yourself and others. Try to surround yourself with people who are positive. Chances are if you find yourself interacting often with people who are highly critical of themselves and others, then you will find yourself falling into that same behavior.

8. Constantly Comparing Yourself to Others

The tendency to compare ourselves to others is as human as any other emotion, but the outcome will always impact your emotional state in a very negative way. Comparisons are always unfair. You are too unique to compare fairly. Your gifts and talents are entirely unique to you and your purpose in this world. Besides that, we often are comparing our worst day to someone else’s best day on Facebook. Comparison not only makes us feel badly, but it also puts the focus on the wrong person. When we constantly compare ourselves to others, we waste precious time that could be spent focusing on own lives. Instead of comparing yourself to others, practice gratitude. Focus on your own success, and watch it flourish!

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Laura Richer

laura@richerhealing.com

Laura Richer is a psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, and coach. Located in the Queen Ann neighborhood of Seattle, she is a Licensed Mental Health Care Counselor Associate and has been practicing in the state of Washington since 2011.