Journey of the Red Thread

An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle but will never break.---Based on an ancient Chinese belief---
This is the story of our journey to follow the red thread to Paul William, and Paul William's journey to his home.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

We are excited to announce that we will be sponsoring the North Alabama Brittany’s Hope Foundation “Walk of Love” on June 27, 2009. Our goal is to raise funds to make it easier for special needs children to find families to call their own.

When: Saturday June 27, 4:30 pm till dark

Where: Delano Park, Decatur Alabama

As adoptive parents, we have experienced the depth of love in the work being done by the Brittany’s Hope Foundation (www.BrittanysHope.org). The foundation places grants on special needs abandoned children around the world who need loving homes and the warmth of a family.

We brought Paul William home from China in June 2007. But while Paul William came home with us, so many children remained behind, wondering when their family would come to get them. Those children still wait for their chance to have the love and safety of a family. We are working to bring these children home to their forever families. Will you please join us? Together, we can help children around the world.

100% of the money we raise will go entirelyto grants on orphaned and abandoned children.

The event begins at 4:30 pm and will last until dark. The walk itself will take place at 5:00 pm. We will have hot dogs and watermelon following the walk.

If you plan on attending will you help by finding people to sponsor you for the walk? Children around the world are waiting for our help.

Please RSVP to greg@sdiscuba.com if you plan on attending so we may better plan how much food to have. If you wish to help us raise money pleas email greg@sdiscuba.com and we will send more information including sponsor sign up sheets.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Re: Elimination of the need to Re-Adopt Foreign Adopted Children in Alabama

Dear Adoptive Parents,

Currently in the State of Alabama parents of internationally adopted children must “re-adopt” their child in order to receive a “Certificate of Foreign Birth” (“CFB”) from the Alabama Center for Health Statistics that is operated by the Alabama Department of Public Health. A CFB is issued in Alabama for children adopted internationally instead of a standard birth certificate. The CFB essentially contains the same information as a birth certificate. It shows place and date of birth, child’s name and adoptive parents’ name(s) and information. The CFB can be used just like a birth certificate.

Why is a “Certificate of Foreign Birth” needed? It is not something that is a “must do”. International adoptions are usually completed in the country of birth and U.S. Citizenship is granted automatically. However, having a CFB may make life easier for both the adopted child and the adoptive parents. When the time comes to enroll in school, sports programs and other activities or seek medical care for the adopted child, that require proof of age, a CFB from the State of Alabama might be easier than using a foreign birth certificate that is either in a foreign language or has been translated into English. It may also make it easier when applying for a passport from the U.S. State Department or requesting services from the U.S. Social Security Administration. It may be easier to use a CFB when it comes time to apply for driver’s license or marriage license. Later in life when the adoptee needs to replace a lost or stolen birth certificate it will be much easier to contact the Alabama Center for Health Statistics to request a replacement of a CFB rather than trying to replace a birth certificate from a foreign country. So while a CFB may not be a “mandatory” item to have, it could very well make life easier for the adopted child.

Currently Alabama law only allows issuance of a CFB for adoptees whose adoptive parents have first obtained a court order from a circuit judge under the Alabama Foreign Judgments Act. In order to obtain a CFB a family must hire an attorney (or even worse, attempt it themselves) to file a petition in court to give effect to their foreign decree of adoption – even though they have already adopted. When a court in Alabama issues an order granting the petition, the adoptive parents may apply with the Center for Health Statistics for a CFB.

This process is unnecessarily costly and burdensome to families who have already completed the adoption of a foreign child. Legislation is being proposed to change this process. Under the changes to the legislation the Alabama Center for Health Statistics will be required to automatically recognize the already complete adoption and issue a CFB.

Proposed changes below:

"A decree of court or other officially recognized and authorized body terminating the relationship of parent and child or establishing the relationship by adoption issued under due process of law by a court of any other jurisdiction within or outside of the United States shall be recognized in this state and the rights and obligations of the parties as to matters within the jurisdiction of this state shall be determined as though the decree were issued by a court of this state. A certified copy of said decree, when presented to the Center for Health Statistics, shall cause the state to issue a Certificate of Foreign Birth, for which the Center may charge a reasonable fee."

The proposed changes to legislation will ELIMINATE the need for a family to “re-adopt” a child they have already adopted. The family will receive the SAME “Certificate of Foreign Birth” that they would receive now after having gone through a “re-adoption”. An adoptive family will no longer need to spend more money, time and effort on “re-adoption”. An adoptive family will be able to simply and easily send their foreign adoption decree along with whatever processing fee the state requires to obtain a “Certificate of Foreign Birth”.

We need your support for this legislation!

If you have re-adopted:

We need you to write a short description of your re-adoption experience. How long did the process take? How much money did it cost you? Did you have to take time off work? What other hurdles did you have to overcome? What are your personal feelings about having to go through the re-adoption process?

If you are planning on re-adopting:

We need you to write a short description of why you have not done so. Why have you put it off? Is the expense too great? Are you intimidated by the process? Are you frustrated by the fact you have already gone through so much to adopt, why should you have to do more? Are there any other reasons for not readopting? What are your personal feelings about having to go through the re-adoption process?

Please send the information to me and I will see that Representative Hinshaw and Senator Bedford, the sponsors of the legislation, receive it. If you don't want to use your name just use your initials and the name of the city you live in. This will only take you a few minutes. Please take the time to write. You may email your reply to my email address: greg@sdiscuba.com

This information will be sent to the sponsors of the legislation to help demonstrate the need for change in Alabama law.

I also have a draft copy of the legislation. If you would like a copy email me at the address above and I will send it to you in pdf format.

It rarely snows here in Alabama, so when it does it is a big deal. We woke up to snow this morning. It really is beautiful when you only see it every few years. Paul William wasn't sure what to think when he was out in it. He grimaced like rocks were falling on his head. When he first looked outside and saw it he was very excited and ran to the bedroom to tell mom to come and look.

Yes, he is in his pajamas in the picture below. He was also wearing his Curious George slippers. (Do they even sell snow boots in Alabama? I've never seen any.)

The down side is that big brother had to leave to drive back to Tuscaloosa just when it really started to fall.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Paul William's cousin Mary V has a cool blog with invitations, announcements, cards and other things that she designs and sells. She does custom design work for clients for birthdays, weddings, birth announcements, holidays, parties or anything else you might need. Check it out by clicking her logo above.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Our third day in China began again with breakfast at the hotel and meeting Lifeng for more sightseeing.

After breakfast we checked out of the Trader's Hotel where we had stayed since arriving in China. We arrived on Saturday night June 9th, 2007. It is now Tuesday June 12th.

This morning Lifeng took us on a tour of the Summer Palace. The summer palace is actually a very large complex with many buildings. The grounds of the summer palace cover several hundred acres. The entire complex is situated around a large (300 acre?) reservoir called Kunming Lake. The lake was expanded at one point by the Mongol Emperor Kublai Khan. We took our time walking around and taking in the sights. Lifeng told us that in the winter the lake freezes over and people ice skate on it.

We saw a stone bridge leading out to a small island in the middle of the lake. The bridge had seventeen arches. Lifeng asked us if we knew why the bridge had 17 arches. We had no idea of course. The reason is that the center arch, the largest, was the emperors arch. Only the emperor could pass through that arch on his boat. In China the number 9 is considered the emperors number. With 17 arches you could count from either end of the bridge and the center arch will be arch number 9.

There were many people on the grounds of the palace. People sightseeing, reading, playing chess or mahjong, exercising or just enjoying being outside in a beautiful setting. We saw men with "brushes" they had constructed by placing an inverted bottle of water at the bottom of a stick with a rag at the bottom to wick the water down and act as a brush. Using their "brush" they would slowly walk along backwards "writing" on the dark grey stone paths. They were writing in beautiful Chinese calligraphy. As they moved along the oldest characters they had created would slowly disappear as the water evaporated from the stone path. It was really fascinating to watch.

We walked to the far end of the palace grounds and then took a boat across the lake back to our starting point.

After visiting the Palace we drove to an area of Beijing in the middle of the site of the 2008 Summer Olympic Games. The games were scheduled to start in August of 2008. 8-8-8 to be exact. Even in selecting the start date of the Olympics you can see the Chinese fascination with numbers. Lifeng stopped at a local restaurant for lunch. Our meal was Chinese and very good. The only thing we really missed was ice for our drinks.

As we were leaving the area Lifeng pulled to the side of the road so I could take a picture of the "Bird's Nest" Olympic Stadium. At this point the stadium was still under construction. With the games set to begin in only 14 months I didn't think they would be ready. Well, as we all now know, they were ready.

The picture of the stadium was taken at about 2pm. The day was cloudless, however the smog was bad as you can see. It looked like an overcast cloudy day. I estimated the visibility on the freeway at less than a mile. I asked Lifeng if the smog was always this bad. His response? "Oh no, in the winter it is much worse." I can't imagine!

Our time in Beijing was now over. After lunch Lifeng drove us to the Beijing airport. After helping us check in for our flight and making sure we made it through security and out to our gate Lifeng left us for the next part of our adventure. We were flying to Chongqing for a 4 day cruise on the Yangtze river.

While waiting on our flight we became keenly aware that for the first time in our lives we were the only Caucasian American people in a large place filled with hundreds, if not thousands of people. We attracted many looks and stares. I felt sure that we must be the first Caucasians that some of these people had ever seen. I was even approached by one man, who with a big smile on his face, proceeded to examine my face from about 10 inches away. We soon came to realize that the Chinese don't necessarily have the same concept of "personal space" as we Americans do.

After being extremely careful to make sure we did not miss our flight or get on the wrong one we finally boarded buses to be carried to our plane. All the flight announcements and boarding calls were being made in Chinese only.

Flying within China can be interesting to say the least. I can't remember now which airline we used to fly to Chongqing. I think it was Sezchuan Airlines and we used China Southern from Wuhan to Guangzhou. The flight was filled to capacity with what appeared to be working men returning to their homes after working in Beijing. You have never had bad airline food until you have had bad Chinese airline food. Some of the offerings were unidentifiable to us. Fortunately the flight was only a little over 2 hours.

Since he would not be with us during this part of our trip Lifeng had made arrangements for a colleague to meet us at the airport and arrange transfer to the cruise ship.

We made it through the airport and were able to meet up with our guide without incident. The guide showed us out to a van and we loaded our bags and began driving through Chongqing.

Chongqing municipality is now the most populated "city" in China with over 34 million residents. Simply incomprehensible.

Our guide was great in telling us the history and customs of Chongqing. She told us that the city was where some of the American pilots were based during WWII. She was very proud of the fact that the pilots that flew "over the hump" flew in and out of her city.

We (I) only had one incident in China that left me very unnerved and at one point frightened. It happened in Chongqing on the way to board the cruise. Our guide suggested stopping at a store so that we could stock up on snacks and soft drinks for the cruise. She said it would be much cheaper than the prices on the ship. She had the driver pull over and park in front of what looked like a convenience store on a major downtown street. The driver and guide got out of the van followed by the 3 of us. Mary Louise and Greg Jr. followed the guide into the store while the driver walked up onto the sidewalk. I noticed that the van was unlocked and I was concerned that our luggage and carryons were all in the van. I decided to grab the backpack that I was using as a carryon since it contained the major portion of our cash. (We were required to pay the Chinese adoption fees in cash. Not just any cash, but brand new American 100 dollar bills. Thus we had several thousand dollars in cash on us.) I was now torn as to what to do. My wife and son were inside the store and here I stood on a street in China worried about our belongings. About this time I noticed 3 locals had walked up behind our van and had actually pressed their foreheads against the back window to look inside at our luggage. Concern was now approaching panic. I looked up on the side walk at the driver and fortunately I caught his eye and I think he could sense the concern on my face. He immediately threw down the cigarette he was smoking and walked to the van and locked all the doors. About this time Greg Jr. came out and said "mom needs you inside". Still very shaken and concerned I told him to go tell his mother to get out here we are leaving right now. Greg then said "but she needs money to pay, her bag is in the van." I handed him my wallet and told him to go pay and get back out here immediately. Upon exiting the store Mary Louise was understandably very annoyed with my actions since she had no idea what had transpired. Our guide was also confused and concerned but we all got in the van and drove off. Had the three men decided they wanted our bags things would have turned very ugly very fast. If we had lost that money we would have had no choice but to make arrangements to immediately return to the U.S. without Paul William. That was not going to happen. I would have defended our belongings, died trying or ended up in a Chinese prison. Thankfully nothing happened.

On the way to the cruise ship our guide explained that due to the very hilly terrain in Chongqing that there had developed a profession only found in this city in China. There are men who will carry things up and down the hills and many steps of this city. They will carry anything. Buy a new refrigerator, they will get it up the steps to your apartment. Need help getting your luggage down the steps to a cruise ship, they can do it. They are called "bong bong". I have no idea what that means, but for $10 they carried all of our luggage (except the carryon's of course) down the steep steps to the edge of the Yangtze River to our ship. I was happy to pay the $10.

We boarded the ship and checked in and were shown to our cabin. I guess you can call it a cabin. The ship was built in Germany for a Russian river cruise line. The little engraved name plates over the hatches and valves were all in Russian. I am pretty sure our "cabin" was originally intended as crew quarters. The cabin was located on the main deck of the ship. Most of the passenger cabins were on the 2 decks above. We entered the cabin and found 3 single beds in a long narrow room. 2 beds on the right side end to end and one on the left at the far end of the cabin. We did have a port hole. When you looked out you realized the surface of the Yangtze was about a foot below the bottom of the port hole. That meant that as you stood in our cabin the surface of the river was about level with your chest. The "bathroom" was about 4 x 4. The type where you can sit on the toilet, brush your teeth over the sink and take a shower, all at the same time. The quarters were tight with 3 of us and all our luggage but we didn't expect to be spending much time there other than sleeping. We were on a tight budget and this was the cheapest way to take the cruise. The website for the cruise line barely mentioned that they happened to have a couple of cabins that would accommodate 3 people and they didn't even show a floor plan or mention the location on the ship.

We settled in and relaxed a little before dinner. After dinner we explored the ship and turned in for a good nights sleep before the ship departed the next morning.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

(I know, I know, it's been waaaaay too long since we posted. I began this post on June 12,2008 and I am finally editing it today January 11, 2009. We have a friend, Lisa W., who reminds me of that fact every time I see her. Well Lisa, we will try to do better. When I started this trip recap the thought of trying to record all we saw and experienced during our 3 weeks in China became overwhelming. I really do want to record it for Paul William to have in the future. Here is attempt 2, maybe I can do it this time.)

Our second day in China again began with breakfast at the hotel and meeting Lifeng in the lobby. Lifeng served not only as our adoption facilitator for Cradle of Hope Adoption Center but also as our personal tour guide. Most of the time CHAC will have more than one family in China at a time, but as it worked out for us we were the only CHAC family there during June of 2007. That meant we had Lifeng all to ourselves. It was wonderful. Lifeng showed us all over Beijing in his personal vehicle and was a very informative tour guide. He knows Chinese history well.

We left the hotel and began driving north and west through Beijing. The road system there is incredible. We quickly came to realize that the lines painted on the roads in China are simply cosmetic, they serve no useful purpose that we could determine. Chinese drivers have a different sense of road rules than Americans. In China the right of way is yours if you can claim it. To do so simply make sure the front of your car is ahead of the car beside you and you can turn in front of the other driver. The other driver will yield. At one point we were only 200 yards from our exit on the right and we were in the far left lane of a 5 lane freeway. No problem, just start crossing lanes to the right making sure your car is ahead of the one to your right and you can make your exit! There were times when we simply could not watch what was going on as we drove. Traffic does not move as fast on Chinese freeways as our do here. The fastest speed is around 60 mph. The thing that is suprising however is that traffic never seems to slow down much or stop. There is some method to the madness that seems to work for them.

We were heading out to the Great Wall of China. Along the way we stopped at a Jade factory. Here we learned about Jade and watched as the artist carved it into beautiful shapes.

The terrain in and around Beijing is generally pretty flat. As we left Beijing you could see the mountains rising in the distance. After passing through some winding valleys there it was, the Great Wall of China. Until you see it yourself you really can't fathom what the Chinese were able to accomplish with it's construction. While standing on top looking down I asked Greg Jr. what he would have said if he came up the same mountain valley we just did on a horse with an army of men and saw the wall. His reply was, "I would turn around and tell my men to turn their horses around that we are going home!" It really would have been intimidating.

The section of the wall that we saw was at Badaling Pass. Here in the mountains I cannot imagine the effort it took to build the wall. I told Greg Jr. that I could imagine the President of the United States standing at a site like this with the Joint Chiefs of Staff and all the presidents of America's biggest construction companies telling them "I want a wall this tall and this wide built following these mountain ridges". I then imagine them all laughing at him and turning and walking away thinking, "the man has lost his mind!"

After our visit to the wall we stopped at a Friendship Store on the way back to Beijing. The Friendship store is a strange mix that could be compared to a cross between a Cracker Barrel and Stuckeys with a very Chinese flavor. The food was Chinese and good. We enjoyed our meal and wandered through the store for awhile before getting back on the road.

Upon returning to Beijing we visited a "Hutong" neighborhood. This area is representative of how the Chinese have lived for generations. We toured the area in bicycle rickshaws. Our tour guide was a young man not much older than Greg Jr. The guide enjoyed talking to Greg Jr. about American basketball and music. As it turns out the young man was a fan of the American artist "50 Cent". During our tour we stopped and visited a local kindergarten. We were able to wander through and see the classrooms and children. This must happen frequently because the teachers and students didn't seem to pay much attention to the fact we were there.

After the kindergarten visit we stopped and visited a local household. We met the lady that lived there and through our guide she told us about life in her home. It was very hot and we sat on stools in a small outdoor courtyard in the middle of her home. She served us tea and talked about Chinese households. She was very proud that her father knew and served with Chairman Mao. There were photos of both men on the wall in her house. Since I enjoy cooking I was very interested in seeing her kitchen. The woman even lit her stove for me to see how she cooks with a wok. I use the term "stove" loosely here. Here in the states we might call it a blast furnace. The amount of heat generated was amazing.

Our last stop on our Hutong tour was a local Free Market. The market was a large open air building where the local population shops for their daily groceries. Here in the states we might call it a Farmers Market. The market sold anything you could imagine. Fruits, vegetable, meat, fish, poultry and more. All of it VERY fresh. One aisle in the market was spices. The smell was incredible from all the spices mixing together. Greg Jr's. eyes immediately began to water and tear. We had to leave quickly before he was overcome.

We really enjoyed touring the Hutong neighborhood. It really gave us a great understanding of how the Chinese people lead their daily lives and how they have done so for hundreds of years.

After our Hutong tour Lifeng took us to a theatre to see the Chinese Acrobats. If you ever have a chance to see them, do so! They will amaze you with what they do. During many parts of their act you will find yourself saying "that's not possible, a human being cannot do that!"

We returned to our hotel to shower and relax until supper. While waiting I walked to the window and looked out.

From the window in our hotel room we could see a beautifully landscaped area below. Protruding from the ground were large greenhouse type windows. My curiosity was running high. I left the room and walked around to the back of the hotel to find out what these things were. I couldn't find any way to get to the area I wanted to see but found a set of entry doors and inside I could see the top of an escalator going down to . . ?

I went through the door and stepped on the escalator. As I went down what I saw was not what I expected. I don't really know what I expected to see at that point but it definitely was NOT a full size ice skating rink! That's right, an ice skating rink in the middle of an underground shopping mall. A VERY nice mall at that. As nice a mall as any I had ever seen. The mall had all the retailers you would expect to see at any nice mall in this country. I also found a Pizza Hut in the mall.

After returning to the room with this information we quickly concluded pizza was what we wanted for supper. The meal was very good. While sitting there eating it was hard to believe we were not back at home.

Our second day in China was wonderful. We had seen and experienced more than we could have imagined in only 2 days. It was hard to believe we had over 2 1/2 weeks left in China.