Friday, April 3, 2009

In response to my extreme laziness this week I've decided to end the week on a high note. Today Junior from the Brooklyn based We Are All Savages took the time out of his busy day as a librarian (no joke, he works that the NYC College of Technology library in Brooklyn somewhere. Go ask him if he has Twilight. He fucking loves that shit.) to shoot the shit with me (online... more specifically over instant message because I can't be fucked to transcribe taped interviews) about the band, life, nuclear war and the mysterious "Jersey Stranger."

Here's our very special version of 20 questions.

Jack Crank: Uh ok I'm going to ask you questions about WAAS

Junior “Boobs” Tidal: sure

JC: Answer as you see fitWho are you?

JBT: I'm Junior. I run the guns in this outfit. I play the chainsaw and yell a whole lot.

JC: Do you always lie to make friends or just this time?

JBT: I never tell the truth, but that's also a lie.

JC: Good answer. So your band is called We Are All Savages. Why didn't you call it We Are Super Savage or something so you could spell your acronym right? You wass.

JBT: Well, we think that everyone is savage in one way or another. Plus we named it after this legend about these french fur traders who joined a group of native americans to be brutal and awesome. I guess being native american is more metal than being french? Also, WAAS just looks rad.

JC: I still think you're a wass. You know, like in that Manic Hispanic song where the dude comes out to his friend and he's like, "No dude, I'm in to the wass!" Yeah like that.

Anyways, about your look, your logo looks like the sped metal version of the Nausea logo. Is that your schtick? Are you like the sped metal bastard sons of Nausea? YOU THINK YOU'RE GOOD ENOUGH TO COP NAUSEA? IN THIS TOWN?!

JBT: Ha! Totally. Maybe we'll write a song about wass

JC: You definitely should

JBT: Even if we all had dreads, didn't take a shower for six months and have a lady singer, we still wouldn't be as good as Nausea. That band is fucking siiiiick.Yeaaaaah dude, Nausea is fucking sick. So if you don't sound like the sped metal, showering, not as good version of Nausea what do you sound like?Well, we take our influences from a wide range of places.

Riff, our drummer is from Seattle so he's got that Pacific NW metal sound. Like Melvins influence and stuff. Adam and Brendan are from the midwest and their type of hardcore is totally different from the coasts. I was raised on southern crust like His Hero and Buzzoven.

It's hard to say what we sound like. Maybe if someone threw up in a blender after too many shots of whiskey and beer we'd sound like the sounds the blender would make.

JC: Wow... that's... savage. So do you actually write your own lyrics or do you just have one of those random spam generators pick headlines out of the news from the last couple of years?

JBT: We usually just use Mad Libs and a Portuguese dictionary. Right before the show, we try and memorize them and throw in some radical politics for good measure.

JC: Sounds about right. I mean seriously dude, who the fuck is writing about slavers anymore anyways? How long have you been a band?

JBT: We've been a band for almost two years. It takes a long time to figure out what kind of sound we wanted to go for.

We don't just write about slavers though.We also also write about nuclear war and jersey strangers

JC: This is true, some times you write about zombies and media control. Jersey strangers, is that like the Boston strangler?

JBT: The jersey stranger is a special technique. I think you can look it up on urban dictionary.

JC: Remind me to do that after work. So nuclear war is pretty bogus, what else bums you out?

JBT: The current economy is a big let down. That's totally weak sauce. CEOs getting big bailouts and using them for bonuses is really lame.We're also bummed out on weak mixed drinks and hang/bangovers

JC: How bout meat? That get you stoked? What's your best story about beef?

JBT: Ha! I'm not down with meat and I don't have any good stories about beef. I think I've forgotten what it tastes like...

JC: Why the hell am I talking to you again? Is everyone in your band a wuss? I mean veg?

JBT: Nope, Riff rocks the carcass, but he's the only one. I'm vegan cause I really hate plants. Harvest 'em all and fry 'em up! The other kids eat eggs and diary.

JC: Excellent. So what's next for WAAS? You jut put out this CD thing, vinyl? Touring? When will we see the We Are All Savages: INTENSITY IN 10 CITIES!?

JBT: Let's see, we're going to record soon with Brendan Tobin at Sterling Audio. We're trying to talk to some friends on the west coast about a split, but you know punk rockers. We have a tour scheduled for the 3rd week of June where we'll hit the east coast! Then there's going to be that awesome show with Haunted Castle and Nanda Devi before all of that on April 16th, so we're totally psyched.

JC: You say that like you don't already live on the east coast. Cheater. Fuck yeah, that show's where it's gonna be at. I hear you have some other bands that are better than WAAS, is that true? Do your band mates know about this?

JBT: Ha ha! Yeah, I think we get reminded about this at shows. I'm also the drummer for Rats in the Walls. I'm pretty sure the other WAAS dudes know this.I'm not sure which is better. I'm usually tanked at both practices

JC: Yeah that's a good point, you were pretty wasted last night. Are the rumors of WAAS covering Ginuwine's Pony true?

JBT: They are in fact. We're also going to cover R. Kelly's I Believe I Can Fly and a Hall and Oates cover.

JC: Dude Hall and Oates? Step up your game sally. So we're at something like 17 questions and my snark is running thin. Why don't you ask me a question?

JBT: Okay this is a rather personal question, so I understand if you don't want to answer but Reign in Blood or Kill 'em All?

JC: Oh fuck dudeShit

JBT: Yeah, right?

JC: The nuances of that question are just too deep. I guess the short answer would be how many beers in?

JBT: Let's say a sixer

JC: Dag, got me on that one. It's a coin toss. I'd say Kill 'Em All for the bedroom, Reign in Blood for the bathroom. How's that?