This post is dedicated to women that are the offspring of hammerhead sharks. Most people don’t realize that sharks can re-produce humans… but they can. After a shark eats a human they digest the person and later rebirth it as a totally different person. In every case study of hammerhead shark women, the women are 99% genetically the same as a woman created by two humans. The one percent difference lies in the eyes. Hammerhead shark women retain the eye genetics of the shark 100% of the time. It’s unfortunate, but it’s science.

Leah Miller does a wonderful job hosting So You Think You Can Dance Canada; however, she is often spotted circling the contestants backstage as she awaits her midnight snack to be kicked off the show.

Lucy Liu is without question the hottest hammerhead shark woman that exists but is like tits on a bull when it comes to playing catch in the backyard.

Katherine Heigl made a name for herself on Gray’s Anatomy but it was nearly impossible to make the neck in any of her 27 dresses big enough.

Tyra Banks was the “it” runway model in the 1990s but what the crowds lining the catwalks didn’t know was that the head piece she always wore was not an accessory but rather her eyes protruding out the side of her head.

Torri Spelling is the Eve of hammerhead shark women. She frequents clown academies on a regular basis just to find sunglasses with the width necessary to shield her eyes from the powerful California sun.