To the girl who took my “first” virginity

Dear ex,
You’ve probably forgotten me or never expected to hear from me. Am the guy you took his virginity and later him for granted. Remember me now? Last time I called, my voice was rough because flu was taking me down but I am the guy with the manly voice. Did you move on? Not with that wretched guy with a frozen heart. Oh wait, that sounds hate-ish?? I hate you ever since you took off with my virginity.
Honestly, I do miss you. Am on meds now because my friends “claim” I hallucinate. Aren’t you the curvy girl I met at bus stop today? I told them I saw you rock a lingerie ad on a certain billboard. Every time my neighbor’s kid cries, I hear your moans and screams reverberate in my heard. Anyway, one thing I do recall for sure is the staged virginity theft.

Am in my twenties, and you know what, I am a virginity avatar. Remember Stacy? Your girl that saved you with a pill to skive motherhood? Yeah, she too took my virginity but in a more dignified way. It was my birthday so she ripped my second virginity to shreds. With you, it felt nice but hey, you just explored 9% of my ice-berg but Stacy shattered my virginity to million pieces. Your cousin Angel paid me a visit in hospital. My blood pressure was low and I wished I could die. But then, Angel faked she was my sister and demanded to help me bath at 4pm. Well, I was reincarnated by her lust as she took my “third” virginity. Truly your cousin Angel is an angel. Well, its six months since we broke up but my 19th virginity was taken yesterday by a girl I met at the psychiatrist.

Got a question for you; Is virginity broken just once? Well, your reply is highly valued. Got to go. Amanda, my co-driver is at the door.
Your once-lovin’
Ex.