Troilus and Cressida

Breadcrumb

ACT I

PROLOGUE

In Troy, there lies the scene. From isles of GreeceThe princes orgulous, their high blood chafed,Have to the port of Athens sent their ships,Fraught with the ministers and instrumentsOf cruel war: sixty and nine, that woreTheir crownets regal, from the Athenian bayPut forth toward Phrygia; and their vow is madeTo ransack Troy, within whose strong immuresThe ravish'd Helen, Menelaus' queen,With wanton Paris sleeps; and that's the quarrel.To Tenedos they come;And the deep-drawing barks do there disgorgeTheir warlike fraughtage: now on Dardan plainsThe fresh and yet unbruised Greeks do pitchTheir brave pavilions: Priam's six-gated city,Dardan, and Tymbria, Helias, Chetas, Troien,And Antenorides, with massy staplesAnd corresponsive and fulfilling bolts,Sperr up the sons of Troy.Now expectation, tickling skittish spirits,On one and other side, Trojan and Greek,Sets all on hazard: and hither am I comeA prologue arm'd, but not in confidenceOf author's pen or actor's voice, but suitedIn like conditions as our argument,To tell you, fair beholders, that our playLeaps o'er the vaunt and firstlings of those broils,Beginning in the middle, starting thence awayTo what may be digested in a play.Like or find fault; do as your pleasures are:Now good or bad, 'tis but the chance of war.

SCENE I. Troy. Before Priam's palace.

Enter TROILUS armed, and PANDARUS

TROILUS

Call here my varlet; I'll unarm again:Why should I war without the walls of Troy,That find such cruel battle here within?Each Trojan that is master of his heart,Let him to field; Troilus, alas! hath none.

PANDARUS

Will this gear ne'er be mended?

TROILUS

The Greeks are strong and skilful to their strength,Fierce to their skill and to their fierceness valiant;But I am weaker than a woman's tear,Tamer than sleep, fonder than ignorance,Less valiant than the virgin in the nightAnd skilless as unpractised infancy.

PANDARUS

Well, I have told you enough of this: for my part,I'll not meddle nor make no further. He that willhave a cake out of the wheat must needs tarry the grinding.

TROILUS

Have I not tarried?

PANDARUS

Ay, the grinding; but you must tarrythe bolting.

TROILUS

Have I not tarried?

PANDARUS

Ay, the bolting, but you must tarry the leavening.

TROILUS

Still have I tarried.

PANDARUS

Ay, to the leavening; but here's yet in the word'hereafter' the kneading, the making of the cake, theheating of the oven and the baking; nay, you muststay the cooling too, or you may chance to burn your lips.

TROILUS

Patience herself, what goddess e'er she be,Doth lesser blench at sufferance than I do.At Priam's royal table do I sit;And when fair Cressid comes into my thoughts,--So, traitor! 'When she comes!' When is she thence?

PANDARUS

Well, she looked yesternight fairer than ever I sawher look, or any woman else.

TROILUS

I was about to tell thee:--when my heart,As wedged with a sigh, would rive in twain,Lest Hector or my father should perceive me,I have, as when the sun doth light a storm,Buried this sigh in wrinkle of a smile:But sorrow, that is couch'd in seeming gladness,Is like that mirth fate turns to sudden sadness.

PANDARUS

An her hair were not somewhat darker than Helen's--well, go to--there were no more comparison betweenthe women: but, for my part, she is my kinswoman; Iwould not, as they term it, praise her: but I wouldsomebody had heard her talk yesterday, as I did. Iwill not dispraise your sister Cassandra's wit, but--

TROILUS

O Pandarus! I tell thee, Pandarus,--When I do tell thee, there my hopes lie drown'd,Reply not in how many fathoms deepThey lie indrench'd. I tell thee I am madIn Cressid's love: thou answer'st 'she is fair;'Pour'st in the open ulcer of my heartHer eyes, her hair, her cheek, her gait, her voice,Handlest in thy discourse, O, that her hand,In whose comparison all whites are ink,Writing their own reproach, to whose soft seizureThe cygnet's down is harsh and spirit of senseHard as the palm of ploughman: this thou tell'st me,As true thou tell'st me, when I say I love her;But, saying thus, instead of oil and balm,Thou lay'st in every gash that love hath given meThe knife that made it.

PANDARUS

I speak no more than truth.

TROILUS

Thou dost not speak so much.

PANDARUS

Faith, I'll not meddle in't. Let her be as she is:if she be fair, 'tis the better for her; an she benot, she has the mends in her own hands.

TROILUS

Good Pandarus, how now, Pandarus!

PANDARUS

I have had my labour for my travail; ill-thought on ofher and ill-thought on of you; gone between andbetween, but small thanks for my labour.

TROILUS

What, art thou angry, Pandarus? what, with me?

PANDARUS

Because she's kin to me, therefore she's not so fairas Helen: an she were not kin to me, she would be asfair on Friday as Helen is on Sunday. But what careI? I care not an she were a black-a-moor; 'tis all one to me.

TROILUS

Say I she is not fair?

PANDARUS

I do not care whether you do or no. She's a fool tostay behind her father; let her to the Greeks; and soI'll tell her the next time I see her: for my part,I'll meddle nor make no more i' the matter.

TROILUS

Pandarus,--

PANDARUS

Not I.

TROILUS

Sweet Pandarus,--

PANDARUS

Pray you, speak no more to me: I will leave all as Ifound it, and there an end.

Exit PANDARUS. An alarum

TROILUS

Peace, you ungracious clamours! peace, rude sounds!Fools on both sides! Helen must needs be fair,When with your blood you daily paint her thus.I cannot fight upon this argument;It is too starved a subject for my sword.But Pandarus,--O gods, how do you plague me!I cannot come to Cressid but by Pandar;And he's as tetchy to be woo'd to woo.As she is stubborn-chaste against all suit.Tell me, Apollo, for thy Daphne's love,What Cressid is, what Pandar, and what we?Her bed is India; there she lies, a pearl:Between our Ilium and where she resides,Let it be call'd the wild and wandering flood,Ourself the merchant, and this sailing PandarOur doubtful hope, our convoy and our bark.

Alarum. Enter AENEAS

AENEAS

How now, Prince Troilus! wherefore not afield?

TROILUS

Because not there: this woman's answer sorts,For womanish it is to be from thence.What news, AEneas, from the field to-day?

AENEAS

That Paris is returned home and hurt.

TROILUS

By whom, AEneas?

AENEAS

Troilus, by Menelaus.

TROILUS

Let Paris bleed; 'tis but a scar to scorn;Paris is gored with Menelaus' horn.

Alarum

AENEAS

Hark, what good sport is out of town to-day!

TROILUS

Better at home, if 'would I might' were 'may.'But to the sport abroad: are you bound thither?

AENEAS

In all swift haste.

TROILUS

Come, go we then together.

Exeunt

SCENE II. The Same. A street.

Enter CRESSIDA and ALEXANDER

CRESSIDA

Who were those went by?

ALEXANDER

Queen Hecuba and Helen.

CRESSIDA

And whither go they?

ALEXANDER

Up to the eastern tower,Whose height commands as subject all the vale,To see the battle. Hector, whose patienceIs, as a virtue, fix'd, to-day was moved:He chid Andromache and struck his armourer,And, like as there were husbandry in war,Before the sun rose he was harness'd light,And to the field goes he; where every flowerDid, as a prophet, weep what it foresawIn Hector's wrath.

CRESSIDA

What was his cause of anger?

ALEXANDER

The noise goes, this: there is among the GreeksA lord of Trojan blood, nephew to Hector;They call him Ajax.

CRESSIDA

Good; and what of him?

ALEXANDER

They say he is a very man per se,And stands alone.

CRESSIDA

So do all men, unless they are drunk, sick, or have no legs.

ALEXANDER

This man, lady, hath robbed many beasts of theirparticular additions; he is as valiant as the lion,churlish as the bear, slow as the elephant: a maninto whom nature hath so crowded humours that hisvalour is crushed into folly, his folly sauced withdiscretion: there is no man hath a virtue that hehath not a glimpse of, nor any man an attaint but hecarries some stain of it: he is melancholy withoutcause, and merry against the hair: he hath thejoints of every thing, but everything so out of jointthat he is a gouty Briareus, many hands and no use,or purblind Argus, all eyes and no sight.

CRESSIDA

But how should this man, that makesme smile, make Hector angry?

ALEXANDER

They say he yesterday coped Hector in the battle andstruck him down, the disdain and shame whereof hathever since kept Hector fasting and waking.

CRESSIDA

Who comes here?

ALEXANDER

Madam, your uncle Pandarus.

Enter PANDARUS

CRESSIDA

Hector's a gallant man.

ALEXANDER

As may be in the world, lady.

PANDARUS

What's that? what's that?

CRESSIDA

Good morrow, uncle Pandarus.

PANDARUS

Good morrow, cousin Cressid: what do you talk of?Good morrow, Alexander. How do you, cousin? Whenwere you at Ilium?

CRESSIDA

This morning, uncle.

PANDARUS

What were you talking of when I came? Was Hectorarmed and gone ere ye came to Ilium? Helen was notup, was she?

CRESSIDA

Hector was gone, but Helen was not up.

PANDARUS

Even so: Hector was stirring early.

CRESSIDA

That were we talking of, and of his anger.

PANDARUS

Was he angry?

CRESSIDA

So he says here.

PANDARUS

True, he was so: I know the cause too: he'll layabout him to-day, I can tell them that: and there'sTroilus will not come far behind him: let them takeheed of Troilus, I can tell them that too.

CRESSIDA

What, is he angry too?

PANDARUS

Who, Troilus? Troilus is the better man of the two.

CRESSIDA

O Jupiter! there's no comparison.

PANDARUS

What, not between Troilus and Hector? Do you know aman if you see him?

CRESSIDA

Ay, if I ever saw him before and knew him.

PANDARUS

Well, I say Troilus is Troilus.

CRESSIDA

Then you say as I say; for, I am sure, he is not Hector.

PANDARUS

No, nor Hector is not Troilus in some degrees.

CRESSIDA

'Tis just to each of them; he is himself.

PANDARUS

Himself! Alas, poor Troilus! I would he were.

CRESSIDA

So he is.

PANDARUS

Condition, I had gone barefoot to India.

CRESSIDA

He is not Hector.

PANDARUS

Himself! no, he's not himself: would a' werehimself! Well, the gods are above; time must friendor end: well, Troilus, well: I would my heart werein her body. No, Hector is not a better man than Troilus.

You have no judgment, niece: Helenherself swore th' other day, that Troilus, fora brown favour--for so 'tis, I must confess,--not brown neither,--

CRESSIDA

No, but brown.

PANDARUS

'Faith, to say truth, brown and not brown.

CRESSIDA

To say the truth, true and not true.

PANDARUS

She praised his complexion above Paris.

CRESSIDA

Why, Paris hath colour enough.

PANDARUS

So he has.

CRESSIDA

Then Troilus should have too much: if she praisedhim above, his complexion is higher than his; hehaving colour enough, and the other higher, is tooflaming a praise for a good complexion. I had aslief Helen's golden tongue had commended Troilus fora copper nose.

PANDARUS

I swear to you. I think Helen loves him better than Paris.

CRESSIDA

Then she's a merry Greek indeed.

PANDARUS

Nay, I am sure she does. She came to him th' otherday into the compassed window,--and, you know, hehas not past three or four hairs on his chin,--

CRESSIDA

Indeed, a tapster's arithmetic may soon bring hisparticulars therein to a total.

PANDARUS

Why, he is very young: and yet will he, withinthree pound, lift as much as his brother Hector.

CRESSIDA

Is he so young a man and so old a lifter?

PANDARUS

But to prove to you that Helen loves him: she cameand puts me her white hand to his cloven chin--

CRESSIDA

Juno have mercy! how came it cloven?

PANDARUS

Why, you know 'tis dimpled: I think his smilingbecomes him better than any man in all Phrygia.

CRESSIDA

O, he smiles valiantly.

PANDARUS

Does he not?

CRESSIDA

O yes, an 'twere a cloud in autumn.

PANDARUS

Why, go to, then: but to prove to you that Helenloves Troilus,--

CRESSIDA

Troilus will stand to the proof, if you'llprove it so.

PANDARUS

Troilus! why, he esteems her no more than I esteeman addle egg.

CRESSIDA

If you love an addle egg as well as you love an idlehead, you would eat chickens i' the shell.

PANDARUS

I cannot choose but laugh, to think how she tickledhis chin: indeed, she has a marvellous white hand, Imust needs confess,--

CRESSIDA

Without the rack.

PANDARUS

And she takes upon her to spy a white hair on his chin.

CRESSIDA

Alas, poor chin! many a wart is richer.

PANDARUS

But there was such laughing! Queen Hecuba laughedthat her eyes ran o'er.

CRESSIDA

With mill-stones.

PANDARUS

And Cassandra laughed.

CRESSIDA

But there was more temperate fire under the pot ofher eyes: did her eyes run o'er too?

PANDARUS

And Hector laughed.

CRESSIDA

At what was all this laughing?

PANDARUS

Marry, at the white hair that Helen spied on Troilus' chin.

CRESSIDA

An't had been a green hair, I should have laughedtoo.

PANDARUS

They laughed not so much at the hair as at his pretty answer.

CRESSIDA

What was his answer?

PANDARUS

Quoth she, 'Here's but two and fifty hairs on yourchin, and one of them is white.

CRESSIDA

This is her question.

PANDARUS

That's true; make no question of that. 'Two andfifty hairs' quoth he, 'and one white: that whitehair is my father, and all the rest are his sons.''Jupiter!' quoth she, 'which of these hairs is Paris,my husband? 'The forked one,' quoth he, 'pluck'tout, and give it him.' But there was such laughing!and Helen so blushed, an Paris so chafed, and all therest so laughed, that it passed.

CRESSIDA

So let it now; for it has been while going by.

PANDARUS

Well, cousin. I told you a thing yesterday; think on't.

CRESSIDA

So I do.

PANDARUS

I'll be sworn 'tis true; he will weep you, an 'twerea man born in April.

CRESSIDA

And I'll spring up in his tears, an 'twere a nettleagainst May.

A retreat sounded

PANDARUS

Hark! they are coming from the field: shall westand up here, and see them as they pass towardIlium? good niece, do, sweet niece Cressida.

CRESSIDA

At your pleasure.

PANDARUS

Here, here, here's an excellent place; here we maysee most bravely: I'll tell you them all by theirnames as they pass by; but mark Troilus above the rest.

CRESSIDA

Speak not so loud.

AENEAS passes

PANDARUS

That's AEneas: is not that a brave man? he's one ofthe flowers of Troy, I can tell you: but markTroilus; you shall see anon.

ANTENOR passes

CRESSIDA

Who's that?

PANDARUS

That's Antenor: he has a shrewd wit, I can tell you;and he's a man good enough, he's one o' the soundestjudgments in whosoever, and a proper man of person.When comes Troilus? I'll show you Troilus anon: ifhe see me, you shall see him nod at me.

Is a' not? it does a man's heart good. Look youwhat hacks are on his helmet! look you yonder, doyou see? look you there: there's no jesting;there's laying on, take't off who will, as they say:there be hacks!

Look ye yonder, niece; is't not a gallant man too,is't not? Why, this is brave now. Who said he camehurt home to-day? he's not hurt: why, this will doHelen's heart good now, ha! Would I could seeTroilus now! You shall see Troilus anon.

HELENUS passes

CRESSIDA

Who's that?

PANDARUS

That's Helenus. I marvel where Troilus is. That'sHelenus. I think he went not forth to-day. That's Helenus.

Mark him; note him. O brave Troilus! Look well uponhim, niece: look you how his sword is bloodied, andhis helm more hacked than Hector's, and how he looks,and how he goes! O admirable youth! he ne'er sawthree and twenty. Go thy way, Troilus, go thy way!Had I a sister were a grace, or a daughter a goddess,he should take his choice. O admirable man! Paris?Paris is dirt to him; and, I warrant, Helen, tochange, would give an eye to boot.

CRESSIDA

Here come more.

Forces pass

PANDARUS

Asses, fools, dolts! chaff and bran, chaff and bran!porridge after meat! I could live and die i' theeyes of Troilus. Ne'er look, ne'er look: the eaglesare gone: crows and daws, crows and daws! I hadrather be such a man as Troilus than Agamemnon andall Greece.

CRESSIDA

There is among the Greeks Achilles, a better man than Troilus.

PANDARUS

Achilles! a drayman, a porter, a very camel.

CRESSIDA

Well, well.

PANDARUS

'Well, well!' why, have you any discretion? haveyou any eyes? Do you know what a man is? Is notbirth, beauty, good shape, discourse, manhood,learning, gentleness, virtue, youth, liberality,and such like, the spice and salt that season a man?

CRESSIDA

Ay, a minced man: and then to be baked with no datein the pie, for then the man's date's out.

PANDARUS

You are such a woman! one knows not at what ward youlie.

CRESSIDA

Upon my back, to defend my belly; upon my wit, todefend my wiles; upon my secrecy, to defend minehonesty; my mask, to defend my beauty; and you, todefend all these: and at all these wards I lie, at athousand watches.

PANDARUS

Say one of your watches.

CRESSIDA

Nay, I'll watch you for that; and that's one of thechiefest of them too: if I cannot ward what I wouldnot have hit, I can watch you for telling how I tookthe blow; unless it swell past hiding, and then it'spast watching.

PANDARUS

You are such another!

Enter Troilus's Boy

Boy

Sir, my lord would instantly speak with you.

PANDARUS

Where?

Boy

At your own house; there he unarms him.

PANDARUS

Good boy, tell him I come.

Exit boy

I doubt he be hurt. Fare ye well, good niece.

CRESSIDA

Adieu, uncle.

PANDARUS

I'll be with you, niece, by and by.

CRESSIDA

To bring, uncle?

PANDARUS

Ay, a token from Troilus.

CRESSIDA

By the same token, you are a bawd.

Exit PANDARUS

Words, vows, gifts, tears, and love's full sacrifice,He offers in another's enterprise;But more in Troilus thousand fold I seeThan in the glass of Pandar's praise may be;Yet hold I off. Women are angels, wooing:Things won are done; joy's soul lies in the doing.That she beloved knows nought that knows not this:Men prize the thing ungain'd more than it is:That she was never yet that ever knewLove got so sweet as when desire did sue.Therefore this maxim out of love I teach:Achievement is command; ungain'd, beseech:Then though my heart's content firm love doth bear,Nothing of that shall from mine eyes appear.

Exeunt

SCENE III. The Grecian camp. Before Agamemnon's tent.

Sennet. Enter AGAMEMNON, NESTOR, ULYSSES, MENELAUS, and others

AGAMEMNON

Princes,What grief hath set the jaundice on your cheeks?The ample proposition that hope makesIn all designs begun on earth belowFails in the promised largeness: cheques and disastersGrow in the veins of actions highest rear'd,As knots, by the conflux of meeting sap,Infect the sound pine and divert his grainTortive and errant from his course of growth.Nor, princes, is it matter new to usThat we come short of our suppose so farThat after seven years' siege yet Troy walls stand;Sith every action that hath gone before,Whereof we have record, trial did drawBias and thwart, not answering the aim,And that unbodied figure of the thoughtThat gave't surmised shape. Why then, you princes,Do you with cheeks abash'd behold our works,And call them shames? which are indeed nought elseBut the protractive trials of great JoveTo find persistive constancy in men:The fineness of which metal is not foundIn fortune's love; for then the bold and coward,The wise and fool, the artist and unread,The hard and soft seem all affined and kin:But, in the wind and tempest of her frown,Distinction, with a broad and powerful fan,Puffing at all, winnows the light away;And what hath mass or matter, by itselfLies rich in virtue and unmingled.

NESTOR

With due observance of thy godlike seat,Great Agamemnon, Nestor shall applyThy latest words. In the reproof of chanceLies the true proof of men: the sea being smooth,How many shallow bauble boats dare sailUpon her patient breast, making their wayWith those of nobler bulk!But let the ruffian Boreas once enrageThe gentle Thetis, and anon beholdThe strong-ribb'd bark through liquid mountains cut,Bounding between the two moist elements,Like Perseus' horse: where's then the saucy boatWhose weak untimber'd sides but even nowCo-rivall'd greatness? Either to harbour fled,Or made a toast for Neptune. Even soDoth valour's show and valour's worth divideIn storms of fortune; for in her ray and brightnessThe herd hath more annoyance by the breezeThan by the tiger; but when the splitting windMakes flexible the knees of knotted oaks,And flies fled under shade, why, then the thing of courageAs roused with rage with rage doth sympathize,And with an accent tuned in selfsame keyRetorts to chiding fortune.

ULYSSES

Agamemnon,Thou great commander, nerve and bone of Greece,Heart of our numbers, soul and only spirit.In whom the tempers and the minds of allShould be shut up, hear what Ulysses speaks.Besides the applause and approbation To which,

To AGAMEMNON

most mighty for thy place and sway,

To NESTOR

And thou most reverend for thy stretch'd-out lifeI give to both your speeches, which were suchAs Agamemnon and the hand of GreeceShould hold up high in brass, and such againAs venerable Nestor, hatch'd in silver,Should with a bond of air, strong as the axle-treeOn which heaven rides, knit all the Greekish earsTo his experienced tongue, yet let it please both,Thou great, and wise, to hear Ulysses speak.

AGAMEMNON

Speak, prince of Ithaca; and be't of less expectThat matter needless, of importless burden,Divide thy lips, than we are confident,When rank Thersites opes his mastic jaws,We shall hear music, wit and oracle.

ULYSSES

Troy, yet upon his basis, had been down,And the great Hector's sword had lack'd a master,But for these instances.The specialty of rule hath been neglected:And, look, how many Grecian tents do standHollow upon this plain, so many hollow factions.When that the general is not like the hiveTo whom the foragers shall all repair,What honey is expected? Degree being vizarded,The unworthiest shows as fairly in the mask.The heavens themselves, the planets and this centreObserve degree, priority and place,Insisture, course, proportion, season, form,Office and custom, in all line of order;And therefore is the glorious planet SolIn noble eminence enthroned and spheredAmidst the other; whose medicinable eyeCorrects the ill aspects of planets evil,And posts, like the commandment of a king,Sans cheque to good and bad: but when the planetsIn evil mixture to disorder wander,What plagues and what portents! what mutiny!What raging of the sea! shaking of earth!Commotion in the winds! frights, changes, horrors,Divert and crack, rend and deracinateThe unity and married calm of statesQuite from their fixure! O, when degree is shaked,Which is the ladder to all high designs,Then enterprise is sick! How could communities,Degrees in schools and brotherhoods in cities,Peaceful commerce from dividable shores,The primogenitive and due of birth,Prerogative of age, crowns, sceptres, laurels,But by degree, stand in authentic place?Take but degree away, untune that string,And, hark, what discord follows! each thing meetsIn mere oppugnancy: the bounded watersShould lift their bosoms higher than the shoresAnd make a sop of all this solid globe:Strength should be lord of imbecility,And the rude son should strike his father dead:Force should be right; or rather, right and wrong,Between whose endless jar justice resides,Should lose their names, and so should justice too.Then every thing includes itself in power,Power into will, will into appetite;And appetite, an universal wolf,So doubly seconded with will and power,Must make perforce an universal prey,And last eat up himself. Great Agamemnon,This chaos, when degree is suffocate,Follows the choking.And this neglection of degree it isThat by a pace goes backward, with a purposeIt hath to climb. The general's disdain'dBy him one step below, he by the next,That next by him beneath; so every step,Exampled by the first pace that is sickOf his superior, grows to an envious feverOf pale and bloodless emulation:And 'tis this fever that keeps Troy on foot,Not her own sinews. To end a tale of length,Troy in our weakness stands, not in her strength.

NESTOR

Most wisely hath Ulysses here discover'dThe fever whereof all our power is sick.

AGAMEMNON

The nature of the sickness found, Ulysses,What is the remedy?

ULYSSES

The great Achilles, whom opinion crownsThe sinew and the forehand of our host,Having his ear full of his airy fame,Grows dainty of his worth, and in his tentLies mocking our designs: with him PatroclusUpon a lazy bed the livelong dayBreaks scurril jests;And with ridiculous and awkward action,Which, slanderer, he imitation calls,He pageants us. Sometime, great Agamemnon,Thy topless deputation he puts on,And, like a strutting player, whose conceitLies in his hamstring, and doth think it richTo hear the wooden dialogue and sound'Twixt his stretch'd footing and the scaffoldage,--Such to-be-pitied and o'er-wrested seemingHe acts thy greatness in: and when he speaks,'Tis like a chime a-mending; with terms unsquared,Which, from the tongue of roaring Typhon dropp'dWould seem hyperboles. At this fusty stuffThe large Achilles, on his press'd bed lolling,From his deep chest laughs out a loud applause;Cries 'Excellent! 'tis Agamemnon just.Now play me Nestor; hem, and stroke thy beard,As he being drest to some oration.'That's done, as near as the extremest endsOf parallels, as like as Vulcan and his wife:Yet god Achilles still cries 'Excellent!'Tis Nestor right. Now play him me, Patroclus,Arming to answer in a night alarm.'And then, forsooth, the faint defects of ageMust be the scene of mirth; to cough and spit,And, with a palsy-fumbling on his gorget,Shake in and out the rivet: and at this sportSir Valour dies; cries 'O, enough, Patroclus;Or give me ribs of steel! I shall split allIn pleasure of my spleen.' And in this fashion,All our abilities, gifts, natures, shapes,Severals and generals of grace exact,Achievements, plots, orders, preventions,Excitements to the field, or speech for truce,Success or loss, what is or is not, servesAs stuff for these two to make paradoxes.

NESTOR

And in the imitation of these twain--Who, as Ulysses says, opinion crownsWith an imperial voice--many are infect.Ajax is grown self-will'd, and bears his headIn such a rein, in full as proud a placeAs broad Achilles; keeps his tent like him;Makes factious feasts; rails on our state of war,Bold as an oracle, and sets Thersites,A slave whose gall coins slanders like a mint,To match us in comparisons with dirt,To weaken and discredit our exposure,How rank soever rounded in with danger.

ULYSSES

They tax our policy, and call it cowardice,Count wisdom as no member of the war,Forestall prescience, and esteem no actBut that of hand: the still and mental parts,That do contrive how many hands shall strike,When fitness calls them on, and know by measureOf their observant toil the enemies' weight,--Why, this hath not a finger's dignity:They call this bed-work, mappery, closet-war;So that the ram that batters down the wall,For the great swing and rudeness of his poise,They place before his hand that made the engine,Or those that with the fineness of their soulsBy reason guide his execution.

NESTOR

Let this be granted, and Achilles' horseMakes many Thetis' sons.

A tucket

AGAMEMNON

What trumpet? look, Menelaus.

MENELAUS

From Troy.

Enter AENEAS

AGAMEMNON

What would you 'fore our tent?

AENEAS

Is this great Agamemnon's tent, I pray you?

AGAMEMNON

Even this.

AENEAS

May one, that is a herald and a prince,Do a fair message to his kingly ears?

AGAMEMNON

With surety stronger than Achilles' arm'Fore all the Greekish heads, which with one voiceCall Agamemnon head and general.

AENEAS

Fair leave and large security. How mayA stranger to those most imperial looksKnow them from eyes of other mortals?

AGAMEMNON

How!

AENEAS

Ay;I ask, that I might waken reverence,And bid the cheek be ready with a blushModest as morning when she coldly eyesThe youthful Phoebus:Which is that god in office, guiding men?Which is the high and mighty Agamemnon?

AGAMEMNON

This Trojan scorns us; or the men of TroyAre ceremonious courtiers.

AENEAS

Courtiers as free, as debonair, unarm'd,As bending angels; that's their fame in peace:But when they would seem soldiers, they have galls,Good arms, strong joints, true swords; and,Jove's accord,Nothing so full of heart. But peace, AEneas,Peace, Trojan; lay thy finger on thy lips!The worthiness of praise distains his worth,If that the praised himself bring the praise forth:But what the repining enemy commends,That breath fame blows; that praise, sole sure,transcends.

AGAMEMNON

Sir, you of Troy, call you yourself AEneas?

AENEAS

Ay, Greek, that is my name.

AGAMEMNON

What's your affair I pray you?

AENEAS

Sir, pardon; 'tis for Agamemnon's ears.

AGAMEMNON

He hears naught privately that comes from Troy.

AENEAS

Nor I from Troy come not to whisper him:I bring a trumpet to awake his ear,To set his sense on the attentive bent,And then to speak.

AGAMEMNON

Speak frankly as the wind;It is not Agamemnon's sleeping hour:That thou shalt know. Trojan, he is awake,He tells thee so himself.

We have, great Agamemnon, here in TroyA prince call'd Hector,--Priam is his father,--Who in this dull and long-continued truceIs rusty grown: he bade me take a trumpet,And to this purpose speak. Kings, princes, lords!If there be one among the fair'st of GreeceThat holds his honour higher than his ease,That seeks his praise more than he fears his peril,That knows his valour, and knows not his fear,That loves his mistress more than in confession,With truant vows to her own lips he loves,And dare avow her beauty and her worthIn other arms than hers,--to him this challenge.Hector, in view of Trojans and of Greeks,Shall make it good, or do his best to do it,He hath a lady, wiser, fairer, truer,Than ever Greek did compass in his arms,And will to-morrow with his trumpet callMidway between your tents and walls of Troy,To rouse a Grecian that is true in love:If any come, Hector shall honour him;If none, he'll say in Troy when he retires,The Grecian dames are sunburnt and not worthThe splinter of a lance. Even so much.

AGAMEMNON

This shall be told our lovers, Lord AEneas;If none of them have soul in such a kind,We left them all at home: but we are soldiers;And may that soldier a mere recreant prove,That means not, hath not, or is not in love!If then one is, or hath, or means to be,That one meets Hector; if none else, I am he.

NESTOR

Tell him of Nestor, one that was a manWhen Hector's grandsire suck'd: he is old now;But if there be not in our Grecian hostOne noble man that hath one spark of fire,To answer for his love, tell him from meI'll hide my silver beard in a gold beaverAnd in my vantbrace put this wither'd brawn,And meeting him will tell him that my ladyWas fairer than his grandam and as chasteAs may be in the world: his youth in flood,I'll prove this truth with my three drops of blood.

AENEAS

Now heavens forbid such scarcity of youth!

ULYSSES

Amen.

AGAMEMNON

Fair Lord AEneas, let me touch your hand;To our pavilion shall I lead you, sir.Achilles shall have word of this intent;So shall each lord of Greece, from tent to tent:Yourself shall feast with us before you goAnd find the welcome of a noble foe.

Exeunt all but ULYSSES and NESTOR

ULYSSES

Nestor!

NESTOR

What says Ulysses?

ULYSSES

I have a young conception in my brain;Be you my time to bring it to some shape.

NESTOR

What is't?

ULYSSES

This 'tis:Blunt wedges rive hard knots: the seeded prideThat hath to this maturity blown upIn rank Achilles must or now be cropp'd,Or, shedding, breed a nursery of like evil,To overbulk us all.

NESTOR

Well, and how?

ULYSSES

This challenge that the gallant Hector sends,However it is spread in general name,Relates in purpose only to Achilles.

NESTOR

The purpose is perspicuous even as substance,Whose grossness little characters sum up:And, in the publication, make no strain,But that Achilles, were his brain as barrenAs banks of Libya,--though, Apollo knows,'Tis dry enough,--will, with great speed of judgment,Ay, with celerity, find Hector's purposePointing on him.

ULYSSES

And wake him to the answer, think you?

NESTOR

Yes, 'tis most meet: whom may you else oppose,That can from Hector bring his honour off,If not Achilles? Though't be a sportful combat,Yet in the trial much opinion dwells;For here the Trojans taste our dear'st reputeWith their finest palate: and trust to me, Ulysses,Our imputation shall be oddly poisedIn this wild action; for the success,Although particular, shall give a scantlingOf good or bad unto the general;And in such indexes, although small pricksTo their subsequent volumes, there is seenThe baby figure of the giant massOf things to come at large. It is supposedHe that meets Hector issues from our choiceAnd choice, being mutual act of all our souls,Makes merit her election, and doth boil,As 'twere from us all, a man distill'dOut of our virtues; who miscarrying,What heart receives from hence the conquering part,To steel a strong opinion to themselves?Which entertain'd, limbs are his instruments,In no less working than are swords and bowsDirective by the limbs.

ULYSSES

Give pardon to my speech:Therefore 'tis meet Achilles meet not Hector.Let us, like merchants, show our foulest wares,And think, perchance, they'll sell; if not,The lustre of the better yet to show,Shall show the better. Do not consentThat ever Hector and Achilles meet;For both our honour and our shame in thisAre dogg'd with two strange followers.

NESTOR

I see them not with my old eyes: what are they?

ULYSSES

What glory our Achilles shares from Hector,Were he not proud, we all should share with him:But he already is too insolent;A nd we were better parch in Afric sunThan in the pride and salt scorn of his eyes,Should he 'scape Hector fair: if he were foil'd,Why then, we did our main opinion crushIn taint of our best man. No, make a lottery;And, by device, let blockish Ajax drawThe sort to fight with Hector: among ourselvesGive him allowance for the better man;For that will physic the great MyrmidonWho broils in loud applause, and make him fallHis crest that prouder than blue Iris bends.If the dull brainless Ajax come safe off,We'll dress him up in voices: if he fail,Yet go we under our opinion stillThat we have better men. But, hit or miss,Our project's life this shape of sense assumes:Ajax employ'd plucks down Achilles' plumes.

NESTOR

Ulysses,Now I begin to relish thy advice;And I will give a taste of it forthwithTo Agamemnon: go we to him straight.Two curs shall tame each other: pride aloneMust tarre the mastiffs on, as 'twere their bone.

Exeunt

ACT II

SCENE I. A part of the Grecian camp.

Enter AJAX and THERSITES

AJAX

Thersites!

THERSITES

Agamemnon, how if he had boils? full, all over,generally?

AJAX

Thersites!

THERSITES

And those boils did run? say so: did not thegeneral run then? were not that a botchy core?

I would thou didst itch from head to foot and I hadthe scratching of thee; I would make thee theloathsomest scab in Greece. When thou art forth inthe incursions, thou strikest as slow as another.

AJAX

I say, the proclamation!

THERSITES

Thou grumblest and railest every hour on Achilles,and thou art as full of envy at his greatness asCerberus is at Proserpine's beauty, ay, that thoubarkest at him.

AJAX

Mistress Thersites!

THERSITES

Thou shouldest strike him.

AJAX

Cobloaf!

THERSITES

He would pun thee into shivers with his fist, as asailor breaks a biscuit.

AJAX

[Beating him] You whoreson cur!

THERSITES

Do, do.

AJAX

Thou stool for a witch!

THERSITES

Ay, do, do; thou sodden-witted lord! thou hast nomore brain than I have in mine elbows; an assinegomay tutor thee: thou scurvy-valiant ass! thou arthere but to thrash Trojans; and thou art bought andsold among those of any wit, like a barbarian slave.If thou use to beat me, I will begin at thy heel, andtell what thou art by inches, thou thing of nobowels, thou!

AJAX

You dog!

THERSITES

You scurvy lord!

AJAX

[Beating him] You cur!

THERSITES

Mars his idiot! do, rudeness; do, camel; do, do.

Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS

ACHILLES

Why, how now, Ajax! wherefore do you thus? How now,Thersites! what's the matter, man?

THERSITES

You see him there, do you?

ACHILLES

Ay; what's the matter?

THERSITES

Nay, look upon him.

ACHILLES

So I do: what's the matter?

THERSITES

Nay, but regard him well.

ACHILLES

'Well!' why, I do so.

THERSITES

But yet you look not well upon him; for whosoever youtake him to be, he is Ajax.

ACHILLES

I know that, fool.

THERSITES

Ay, but that fool knows not himself.

AJAX

Therefore I beat thee.

THERSITES

Lo, lo, lo, lo, what modicums of wit he utters! hisevasions have ears thus long. I have bobbed hisbrain more than he has beat my bones: I will buynine sparrows for a penny, and his pia mater is notworth the nineth part of a sparrow. This lord,Achilles, Ajax, who wears his wit in his belly andhis guts in his head, I'll tell you what I say ofhim.

ACHILLES

What?

THERSITES

I say, this Ajax--

Ajax offers to beat him

ACHILLES

Nay, good Ajax.

THERSITES

Has not so much wit--

ACHILLES

Nay, I must hold you.

THERSITES

As will stop the eye of Helen's needle, for whom hecomes to fight.

ACHILLES

Peace, fool!

THERSITES

I would have peace and quietness, but the fool willnot: he there: that he: look you there.

AJAX

O thou damned cur! I shall--

ACHILLES

Will you set your wit to a fool's?

THERSITES

No, I warrant you; for a fools will shame it.

PATROCLUS

Good words, Thersites.

ACHILLES

What's the quarrel?

AJAX

I bade the vile owl go learn me the tenor of theproclamation, and he rails upon me.

THERSITES

I serve thee not.

AJAX

Well, go to, go to.

THERSITES

I serve here voluntarily.

ACHILLES

Your last service was sufferance, 'twas notvoluntary: no man is beaten voluntary: Ajax washere the voluntary, and you as under an impress.

THERSITES

E'en so; a great deal of your wit, too, lies in yoursinews, or else there be liars. Hector have a greatcatch, if he knock out either of your brains: a'were as good crack a fusty nut with no kernel.

ACHILLES

What, with me too, Thersites?

THERSITES

There's Ulysses and old Nestor, whose wit was mouldyere your grandsires had nails on their toes, yoke youlike draught-oxen and make you plough up the wars.

ACHILLES

What, what?

THERSITES

Yes, good sooth: to, Achilles! to, Ajax! to!

AJAX

I shall cut out your tongue.

THERSITES

'Tis no matter! I shall speak as much as thouafterwards.

PATROCLUS

No more words, Thersites; peace!

THERSITES

I will hold my peace when Achilles' brach bids me, shall I?

ACHILLES

There's for you, Patroclus.

THERSITES

I will see you hanged, like clotpoles, ere I comeany more to your tents: I will keep where there iswit stirring and leave the faction of fools.

Exit

PATROCLUS

A good riddance.

ACHILLES

Marry, this, sir, is proclaim'd through all our host:That Hector, by the fifth hour of the sun,Will with a trumpet 'twixt our tents and TroyTo-morrow morning call some knight to armsThat hath a stomach; and such a one that dareMaintain--I know not what: 'tis trash. Farewell.

AJAX

Farewell. Who shall answer him?

ACHILLES

I know not: 'tis put to lottery; otherwiseHe knew his man.

AJAX

O, meaning you. I will go learn more of it.

Exeunt

SCENE II. Troy. A room in Priam's palace.

Enter PRIAM, HECTOR, TROILUS, PARIS, and HELENUS

PRIAM

After so many hours, lives, speeches spent,Thus once again says Nestor from the Greeks:'Deliver Helen, and all damage else--As honour, loss of time, travail, expense,Wounds, friends, and what else dear that is consumedIn hot digestion of this cormorant war--Shall be struck off.' Hector, what say you to't?

HECTOR

Though no man lesser fears the Greeks than IAs far as toucheth my particular,Yet, dread Priam,There is no lady of more softer bowels,More spongy to suck in the sense of fear,More ready to cry out 'Who knows what follows?'Than Hector is: the wound of peace is surety,Surety secure; but modest doubt is call'dThe beacon of the wise, the tent that searchesTo the bottom of the worst. Let Helen go:Since the first sword was drawn about this question,Every tithe soul, 'mongst many thousand dismes,Hath been as dear as Helen; I mean, of ours:If we have lost so many tenths of ours,To guard a thing not ours nor worth to us,Had it our name, the value of one ten,What merit's in that reason which deniesThe yielding of her up?

TROILUS

Fie, fie, my brother!Weigh you the worth and honour of a kingSo great as our dread father in a scaleOf common ounces? will you with counters sumThe past proportion of his infinite?And buckle in a waist most fathomlessWith spans and inches so diminutiveAs fears and reasons? fie, for godly shame!

HELENUS

No marvel, though you bite so sharp at reasons,You are so empty of them. Should not our fatherBear the great sway of his affairs with reasons,Because your speech hath none that tells him so?

TROILUS

You are for dreams and slumbers, brother priest;You fur your gloves with reason. Here areyour reasons:You know an enemy intends you harm;You know a sword employ'd is perilous,And reason flies the object of all harm:Who marvels then, when Helenus beholdsA Grecian and his sword, if he do setThe very wings of reason to his heelsAnd fly like chidden Mercury from Jove,Or like a star disorb'd? Nay, if we talk of reason,Let's shut our gates and sleep: manhood and honourShould have hare-hearts, would they but fattheir thoughtsWith this cramm'd reason: reason and respectMake livers pale and lustihood deject.

HECTOR

Brother, she is not worth what she doth costThe holding.

TROILUS

What is aught, but as 'tis valued?

HECTOR

But value dwells not in particular will;It holds his estimate and dignityAs well wherein 'tis precious of itselfAs in the prizer: 'tis mad idolatryTo make the service greater than the godAnd the will dotes that is attributiveTo what infectiously itself affects,Without some image of the affected merit.

TROILUS

I take to-day a wife, and my electionIs led on in the conduct of my will;My will enkindled by mine eyes and ears,Two traded pilots 'twixt the dangerous shoresOf will and judgment: how may I avoid,Although my will distaste what it elected,The wife I chose? there can be no evasionTo blench from this and to stand firm by honour:We turn not back the silks upon the merchant,When we have soil'd them, nor the remainder viandsWe do not throw in unrespective sieve,Because we now are full. It was thought meetParis should do some vengeance on the Greeks:Your breath of full consent bellied his sails;The seas and winds, old wranglers, took a truceAnd did him service: he touch'd the ports desired,And for an old aunt whom the Greeks held captive,He brought a Grecian queen, whose youth and freshnessWrinkles Apollo's, and makes stale the morning.Why keep we her? the Grecians keep our aunt:Is she worth keeping? why, she is a pearl,Whose price hath launch'd above a thousand ships,And turn'd crown'd kings to merchants.If you'll avouch 'twas wisdom Paris went--As you must needs, for you all cried 'Go, go,'--If you'll confess he brought home noble prize--As you must needs, for you all clapp'd your handsAnd cried 'Inestimable!'--why do you nowThe issue of your proper wisdoms rate,And do a deed that fortune never did,Beggar the estimation which you prizedRicher than sea and land? O, theft most base,That we have stol'n what we do fear to keep!But, thieves, unworthy of a thing so stol'n,That in their country did them that disgrace,We fear to warrant in our native place!

Now, youthful Troilus, do not these high strainsOf divination in our sister workSome touches of remorse? or is your bloodSo madly hot that no discourse of reason,Nor fear of bad success in a bad cause,Can qualify the same?

TROILUS

Why, brother Hector,We may not think the justness of each actSuch and no other than event doth form it,Nor once deject the courage of our minds,Because Cassandra's mad: her brain-sick rapturesCannot distaste the goodness of a quarrelWhich hath our several honours all engagedTo make it gracious. For my private part,I am no more touch'd than all Priam's sons:And Jove forbid there should be done amongst usSuch things as might offend the weakest spleenTo fight for and maintain!

PARIS

Else might the world convince of levityAs well my undertakings as your counsels:But I attest the gods, your full consentGave wings to my propension and cut offAll fears attending on so dire a project.For what, alas, can these my single arms?What Propugnation is in one man's valour,To stand the push and enmity of thoseThis quarrel would excite? Yet, I protest,Were I alone to pass the difficultiesAnd had as ample power as I have will,Paris should ne'er retract what he hath done,Nor faint in the pursuit.

PRIAM

Paris, you speakLike one besotted on your sweet delights:You have the honey still, but these the gall;So to be valiant is no praise at all.

PARIS

Sir, I propose not merely to myselfThe pleasures such a beauty brings with it;But I would have the soil of her fair rapeWiped off, in honourable keeping her.What treason were it to the ransack'd queen,Disgrace to your great worths and shame to me,Now to deliver her possession upOn terms of base compulsion! Can it beThat so degenerate a strain as thisShould once set footing in your generous bosoms?There's not the meanest spirit on our partyWithout a heart to dare or sword to drawWhen Helen is defended, nor none so nobleWhose life were ill bestow'd or death unfamedWhere Helen is the subject; then, I say,Well may we fight for her whom, we know well,The world's large spaces cannot parallel.

HECTOR

Paris and Troilus, you have both said well,And on the cause and question now in handHave glozed, but superficially: not muchUnlike young men, whom Aristotle thoughtUnfit to hear moral philosophy:The reasons you allege do more conduceTo the hot passion of distemper'd bloodThan to make up a free determination'Twixt right and wrong, for pleasure and revengeHave ears more deaf than adders to the voiceOf any true decision. Nature cravesAll dues be render'd to their owners: now,What nearer debt in all humanityThan wife is to the husband? If this lawOf nature be corrupted through affection,And that great minds, of partial indulgenceTo their benumbed wills, resist the same,There is a law in each well-order'd nationTo curb those raging appetites that areMost disobedient and refractory.If Helen then be wife to Sparta's king,As it is known she is, these moral lawsOf nature and of nations speak aloudTo have her back return'd: thus to persistIn doing wrong extenuates not wrong,But makes it much more heavy. Hector's opinionIs this in way of truth; yet ne'ertheless,My spritely brethren, I propend to youIn resolution to keep Helen still,For 'tis a cause that hath no mean dependanceUpon our joint and several dignities.

TROILUS

Why, there you touch'd the life of our design:Were it not glory that we more affectedThan the performance of our heaving spleens,I would not wish a drop of Trojan bloodSpent more in her defence. But, worthy Hector,She is a theme of honour and renown,A spur to valiant and magnanimous deeds,Whose present courage may beat down our foes,And fame in time to come canonize us;For, I presume, brave Hector would not loseSo rich advantage of a promised gloryAs smiles upon the forehead of this actionFor the wide world's revenue.

HECTOR

I am yours,You valiant offspring of great Priamus.I have a roisting challenge sent amongstThe dun and factious nobles of the GreeksWill strike amazement to their drowsy spirits:I was advertised their great general slept,Whilst emulation in the army crept:This, I presume, will wake him.

Exeunt

SCENE III. The Grecian camp. Before Achilles' tent.

Enter THERSITES, solus

THERSITES

How now, Thersites! what lost in the labyrinth ofthy fury! Shall the elephant Ajax carry it thus? Hebeats me, and I rail at him: O, worthy satisfaction!would it were otherwise; that I could beat him,whilst he railed at me. 'Sfoot, I'll learn toconjure and raise devils, but I'll see some issue ofmy spiteful execrations. Then there's Achilles, arare enginer! If Troy be not taken till these twoundermine it, the walls will stand till they fall ofthemselves. O thou great thunder-darter of Olympus,forget that thou art Jove, the king of gods and,Mercury, lose all the serpentine craft of thycaduceus, if ye take not that little, little lessthan little wit from them that they have! whichshort-armed ignorance itself knows is so abundantscarce, it will not in circumvention deliver a flyfrom a spider, without drawing their massy irons andcutting the web. After this, the vengeance on thewhole camp! or rather, the bone-ache! for that,methinks, is the curse dependent on those that warfor a placket. I have said my prayers and devil Envysay Amen. What ho! my Lord Achilles!

Enter PATROCLUS

PATROCLUS

Who's there? Thersites! Good Thersites, come in and rail.

THERSITES

If I could have remembered a gilt counterfeit, thouwouldst not have slipped out of my contemplation: butit is no matter; thyself upon thyself! The commoncurse of mankind, folly and ignorance, be thine ingreat revenue! heaven bless thee from a tutor, anddiscipline come not near thee! Let thy blood be thydirection till thy death! then if she that lays theeout says thou art a fair corse, I'll be sworn andsworn upon't she never shrouded any but lazars.Amen. Where's Achilles?

I'll decline the whole question. Agamemnon commandsAchilles; Achilles is my lord; I am Patroclus'knower, and Patroclus is a fool.

PATROCLUS

You rascal!

THERSITES

Peace, fool! I have not done.

ACHILLES

He is a privileged man. Proceed, Thersites.

THERSITES

Agamemnon is a fool; Achilles is a fool; Thersitesis a fool, and, as aforesaid, Patroclus is a fool.

ACHILLES

Derive this; come.

THERSITES

Agamemnon is a fool to offer to command Achilles;Achilles is a fool to be commanded of Agamemnon;Thersites is a fool to serve such a fool, andPatroclus is a fool positive.

PATROCLUS

Why am I a fool?

THERSITES

Make that demand of the prover. It suffices me thouart. Look you, who comes here?

ACHILLES

Patroclus, I'll speak with nobody.Come in with me, Thersites.

Exit

THERSITES

Here is such patchery, such juggling and suchknavery! all the argument is a cuckold and awhore; a good quarrel to draw emulous factionsand bleed to death upon. Now, the dry serpigo onthe subject! and war and lechery confound all!

Exit

Enter AGAMEMNON, ULYSSES, NESTOR, DIOMEDES, and AJAX

AGAMEMNON

Where is Achilles?

PATROCLUS

Within his tent; but ill disposed, my lord.

AGAMEMNON

Let it be known to him that we are here.He shent our messengers; and we lay byOur appertainments, visiting of him:Let him be told so; lest perchance he thinkWe dare not move the question of our place,Or know not what we are.

PATROCLUS

I shall say so to him.

Exit

ULYSSES

We saw him at the opening of his tent:He is not sick.

AJAX

Yes, lion-sick, sick of proud heart: you may call itmelancholy, if you will favour the man; but, by myhead, 'tis pride: but why, why? let him show us thecause. A word, my lord.

Takes AGAMEMNON aside

NESTOR

What moves Ajax thus to bay at him?

ULYSSES

Achilles hath inveigled his fool from him.

NESTOR

Who, Thersites?

ULYSSES

He.

NESTOR

Then will Ajax lack matter, if he have lost his argument.

ULYSSES

No, you see, he is his argument that has hisargument, Achilles.

NESTOR

All the better; their fraction is more our wish thantheir faction: but it was a strong composure a foolcould disunite.

The elephant hath joints, but none for courtesy:his legs are legs for necessity, not for flexure.

PATROCLUS

Achilles bids me say, he is much sorry,If any thing more than your sport and pleasureDid move your greatness and this noble stateTo call upon him; he hopes it is no otherBut for your health and your digestion sake,And after-dinner's breath.

AGAMEMNON

Hear you, Patroclus:We are too well acquainted with these answers:But his evasion, wing'd thus swift with scorn,Cannot outfly our apprehensions.Much attribute he hath, and much the reasonWhy we ascribe it to him; yet all his virtues,Not virtuously on his own part beheld,Do in our eyes begin to lose their gloss,Yea, like fair fruit in an unwholesome dish,Are like to rot untasted. Go and tell him,We come to speak with him; and you shall not sin,If you do say we think him over-proudAnd under-honest, in self-assumption greaterThan in the note of judgment; and worthierthan himselfHere tend the savage strangeness he puts on,Disguise the holy strength of their command,And underwrite in an observing kindHis humorous predominance; yea, watchHis pettish lunes, his ebbs, his flows, as ifThe passage and whole carriage of this actionRode on his tide. Go tell him this, and add,That if he overhold his price so much,We'll none of him; but let him, like an engineNot portable, lie under this report:'Bring action hither, this cannot go to war:A stirring dwarf we do allowance giveBefore a sleeping giant.' Tell him so.

PATROCLUS

I shall; and bring his answer presently.

Exit

AGAMEMNON

In second voice we'll not be satisfied;We come to speak with him. Ulysses, enter you.

Exit ULYSSES

AJAX

What is he more than another?

AGAMEMNON

No more than what he thinks he is.

AJAX

Is he so much? Do you not think he thinks himself abetter man than I am?

AGAMEMNON

No question.

AJAX

Will you subscribe his thought, and say he is?

AGAMEMNON

No, noble Ajax; you are as strong, as valiant, aswise, no less noble, much more gentle, and altogethermore tractable.

AJAX

Why should a man be proud? How doth pride grow? Iknow not what pride is.

AGAMEMNON

Your mind is the clearer, Ajax, and your virtues thefairer. He that is proud eats up himself: pride ishis own glass, his own trumpet, his own chronicle;and whatever praises itself but in the deed, devoursthe deed in the praise.

AJAX

I do hate a proud man, as I hate the engendering of toads.

NESTOR

Yet he loves himself: is't not strange?

Aside

Re-enter ULYSSES

ULYSSES

Achilles will not to the field to-morrow.

AGAMEMNON

What's his excuse?

ULYSSES

He doth rely on none,But carries on the stream of his disposeWithout observance or respect of any,In will peculiar and in self-admission.

AGAMEMNON

Why will he not upon our fair requestUntent his person and share the air with us?

ULYSSES

Things small as nothing, for request's sake only,He makes important: possess'd he is with greatness,And speaks not to himself but with a prideThat quarrels at self-breath: imagined worthHolds in his blood such swoln and hot discourseThat 'twixt his mental and his active partsKingdom'd Achilles in commotion ragesAnd batters down himself: what should I say?He is so plaguy proud that the death-tokens of itCry 'No recovery.'

AGAMEMNON

Let Ajax go to him.Dear lord, go you and greet him in his tent:'Tis said he holds you well, and will be ledAt your request a little from himself.

ULYSSES

O Agamemnon, let it not be so!We'll consecrate the steps that Ajax makesWhen they go from Achilles: shall the proud lordThat bastes his arrogance with his own seamAnd never suffers matter of the worldEnter his thoughts, save such as do revolveAnd ruminate himself, shall he be worshipp'dOf that we hold an idol more than he?No, this thrice worthy and right valiant lordMust not so stale his palm, nobly acquired;Nor, by my will, assubjugate his merit,As amply titled as Achilles is,By going to Achilles:That were to enlard his fat already prideAnd add more coals to Cancer when he burnsWith entertaining great Hyperion.This lord go to him! Jupiter forbid,And say in thunder 'Achilles go to him.'

He's not yet through warm: force him with praises:pour in, pour in; his ambition is dry.

ULYSSES

[To AGAMEMNON] My lord, you feed too much on this dislike.

NESTOR

Our noble general, do not do so.

DIOMEDES

You must prepare to fight without Achilles.

ULYSSES

Why, 'tis this naming of him does him harm.Here is a man--but 'tis before his face;I will be silent.

NESTOR

Wherefore should you so?He is not emulous, as Achilles is.

ULYSSES

Know the whole world, he is as valiant.

AJAX

A whoreson dog, that shall pelter thus with us!Would he were a Trojan!

NESTOR

What a vice were it in Ajax now,--

ULYSSES

If he were proud,--

DIOMEDES

Or covetous of praise,--

ULYSSES

Ay, or surly borne,--

DIOMEDES

Or strange, or self-affected!

ULYSSES

Thank the heavens, lord, thou art of sweet composure;Praise him that got thee, she that gave thee suck:Famed be thy tutor, and thy parts of natureThrice famed, beyond all erudition:But he that disciplined thy arms to fight,Let Mars divide eternity in twain,And give him half: and, for thy vigour,Bull-bearing Milo his addition yieldTo sinewy Ajax. I will not praise thy wisdom,Which, like a bourn, a pale, a shore, confinesThy spacious and dilated parts: here's Nestor;Instructed by the antiquary times,He must, he is, he cannot but be wise:Put pardon, father Nestor, were your daysAs green as Ajax' and your brain so temper'd,You should not have the eminence of him,But be as Ajax.

AJAX

Shall I call you father?

NESTOR

Ay, my good son.

DIOMEDES

Be ruled by him, Lord Ajax.

ULYSSES

There is no tarrying here; the hart AchillesKeeps thicket. Please it our great generalTo call together all his state of war;Fresh kings are come to Troy: to-morrowWe must with all our main of power stand fast:And here's a lord,--come knights from east to west,And cull their flower, Ajax shall cope the best.

He eats nothing but doves, love, and that breeds hotblood, and hot blood begets hot thoughts, and hotthoughts beget hot deeds, and hot deeds is love.

PANDARUS

Is this the generation of love? hot blood, hotthoughts, and hot deeds? Why, they are vipers:is love a generation of vipers? Sweet lord, who'sa-field to-day?

PARIS

Hector, Deiphobus, Helenus, Antenor, and all thegallantry of Troy: I would fain have armed to-day,but my Nell would not have it so. How chance mybrother Troilus went not?

HELEN

He hangs the lip at something: you know all, Lord Pandarus.

PANDARUS

Not I, honey-sweet queen. I long to hear how theysped to-day. You'll remember your brother's excuse?

PARIS

To a hair.

PANDARUS

Farewell, sweet queen.

HELEN

Commend me to your niece.

PANDARUS

I will, sweet queen.

Exit

A retreat sounded

PARIS

They're come from field: let us to Priam's hall,To greet the warriors. Sweet Helen, I must woo youTo help unarm our Hector: his stubborn buckles,With these your white enchanting fingers touch'd,Shall more obey than to the edge of steelOr force of Greekish sinews; you shall do moreThan all the island kings,--disarm great Hector.

HELEN

'Twill make us proud to be his servant, Paris;Yea, what he shall receive of us in dutyGives us more palm in beauty than we have,Yea, overshines ourself.

PARIS

Sweet, above thought I love thee.

Exeunt

SCENE II. The same. Pandarus' orchard.

Enter PANDARUS and Troilus's Boy, meeting

PANDARUS

How now! where's thy master? at my cousinCressida's?

Boy

No, sir; he stays for you to conduct him thither.

PANDARUS

O, here he comes.

Enter TROILUS

How now, how now!

TROILUS

Sirrah, walk off.

Exit Boy

PANDARUS

Have you seen my cousin?

TROILUS

No, Pandarus: I stalk about her door,Like a strange soul upon the Stygian banksStaying for waftage. O, be thou my Charon,And give me swift transportance to those fieldsWhere I may wallow in the lily-bedsProposed for the deserver! O gentle Pandarus,From Cupid's shoulder pluck his painted wingsAnd fly with me to Cressid!

PANDARUS

Walk here i' the orchard, I'll bring her straight.

Exit

TROILUS

I am giddy; expectation whirls me round.The imaginary relish is so sweetThat it enchants my sense: what will it be,When that the watery palate tastes indeedLove's thrice repured nectar? death, I fear me,Swooning destruction, or some joy too fine,Too subtle-potent, tuned too sharp in sweetness,For the capacity of my ruder powers:I fear it much; and I do fear besides,That I shall lose distinction in my joys;As doth a battle, when they charge on heapsThe enemy flying.

Re-enter PANDARUS

PANDARUS

She's making her ready, she'll come straight: youmust be witty now. She does so blush, and fetchesher wind so short, as if she were frayed with asprite: I'll fetch her. It is the prettiestvillain: she fetches her breath as short as anew-ta'en sparrow.

Exit

TROILUS

Even such a passion doth embrace my bosom:My heart beats thicker than a feverous pulse;And all my powers do their bestowing lose,Like vassalage at unawares encounteringThe eye of majesty.

Re-enter PANDARUS with CRESSIDA

PANDARUS

Come, come, what need you blush? shame's a baby.Here she is now: swear the oaths now to her thatyou have sworn to me. What, are you gone again?you must be watched ere you be made tame, must you?Come your ways, come your ways; an you draw backward,we'll put you i' the fills. Why do you not speak toher? Come, draw this curtain, and let's see yourpicture. Alas the day, how loath you are to offenddaylight! an 'twere dark, you'ld close sooner.So, so; rub on, and kiss the mistress. How now!a kiss in fee-farm! build there, carpenter; the airis sweet. Nay, you shall fight your hearts out ereI part you. The falcon as the tercel, for all theducks i' the river: go to, go to.

O, let my lady apprehend no fear: in all Cupid'spageant there is presented no monster.

CRESSIDA

Nor nothing monstrous neither?

TROILUS

Nothing, but our undertakings; when we vow to weepseas, live in fire, eat rocks, tame tigers; thinkingit harder for our mistress to devise impositionenough than for us to undergo any difficulty imposed.This is the monstruosity in love, lady, that the willis infinite and the execution confined, that thedesire is boundless and the act a slave to limit.

CRESSIDA

They say all lovers swear more performance than theyare able and yet reserve an ability that they neverperform, vowing more than the perfection of ten anddischarging less than the tenth part of one. Theythat have the voice of lions and the act of hares,are they not monsters?

TROILUS

Are there such? such are not we: praise us as weare tasted, allow us as we prove; our head shall gobare till merit crown it: no perfection in reversionshall have a praise in present: we will not namedesert before his birth, and, being born, his additionshall be humble. Few words to fair faith: Troilusshall be such to Cressid as what envy can say worstshall be a mock for his truth, and what truth canspeak truest not truer than Troilus.

CRESSIDA

Will you walk in, my lord?

Re-enter PANDARUS

PANDARUS

What, blushing still? have you not done talking yet?

CRESSIDA

Well, uncle, what folly I commit, I dedicate to you.

PANDARUS

I thank you for that: if my lord get a boy of you,you'll give him me. Be true to my lord: if heflinch, chide me for it.

TROILUS

You know now your hostages; your uncle's word and myfirm faith.

PANDARUS

Nay, I'll give my word for her too: our kindred,though they be long ere they are wooed, they areconstant being won: they are burs, I can tell you;they'll stick where they are thrown.

CRESSIDA

Boldness comes to me now, and brings me heart.Prince Troilus, I have loved you night and dayFor many weary months.

TROILUS

Why was my Cressid then so hard to win?

CRESSIDA

Hard to seem won: but I was won, my lord,With the first glance that ever--pardon me--If I confess much, you will play the tyrant.I love you now; but not, till now, so muchBut I might master it: in faith, I lie;My thoughts were like unbridled children, grownToo headstrong for their mother. See, we fools!Why have I blabb'd? who shall be true to us,When we are so unsecret to ourselves?But, though I loved you well, I woo'd you not;And yet, good faith, I wish'd myself a man,Or that we women had men's privilegeOf speaking first. Sweet, bid me hold my tongue,For in this rapture I shall surely speakThe thing I shall repent. See, see, your silence,Cunning in dumbness, from my weakness drawsMy very soul of counsel! stop my mouth.

TROILUS

And shall, albeit sweet music issues thence.

PANDARUS

Pretty, i' faith.

CRESSIDA

My lord, I do beseech you, pardon me;'Twas not my purpose, thus to beg a kiss:I am ashamed. O heavens! what have I done?For this time will I take my leave, my lord.

TROILUS

Your leave, sweet Cressid!

PANDARUS

Leave! an you take leave till to-morrow morning,--

CRESSIDA

Pray you, content you.

TROILUS

What offends you, lady?

CRESSIDA

Sir, mine own company.

TROILUS

You cannot shun Yourself.

CRESSIDA

Let me go and try:I have a kind of self resides with you;But an unkind self, that itself will leave,To be another's fool. I would be gone:Where is my wit? I know not what I speak.

TROILUS

Well know they what they speak that speak so wisely.

CRESSIDA

Perchance, my lord, I show more craft than love;And fell so roundly to a large confession,To angle for your thoughts: but you are wise,Or else you love not, for to be wise and loveExceeds man's might; that dwells with gods above.

TROILUS

O that I thought it could be in a woman--As, if it can, I will presume in you--To feed for aye her ramp and flames of love;To keep her constancy in plight and youth,Outliving beauty's outward, with a mindThat doth renew swifter than blood decays!Or that persuasion could but thus convince me,That my integrity and truth to youMight be affronted with the match and weightOf such a winnow'd purity in love;How were I then uplifted! but, alas!I am as true as truth's simplicityAnd simpler than the infancy of truth.

CRESSIDA

In that I'll war with you.

TROILUS

O virtuous fight,When right with right wars who shall be most right!True swains in love shall in the world to comeApprove their truths by Troilus: when their rhymes,Full of protest, of oath and big compare,Want similes, truth tired with iteration,As true as steel, as plantage to the moon,As sun to day, as turtle to her mate,As iron to adamant, as earth to the centre,Yet, after all comparisons of truth,As truth's authentic author to be cited,'As true as Troilus' shall crown up the verse,And sanctify the numbers.

CRESSIDA

Prophet may you be!If I be false, or swerve a hair from truth,When time is old and hath forgot itself,When waterdrops have worn the stones of Troy,And blind oblivion swallow'd cities up,And mighty states characterless are gratedTo dusty nothing, yet let memory,From false to false, among false maids in love,Upbraid my falsehood! when they've said 'as falseAs air, as water, wind, or sandy earth,As fox to lamb, as wolf to heifer's calf,Pard to the hind, or stepdame to her son,''Yea,' let them say, to stick the heart of falsehood,'As false as Cressid.'

PANDARUS

Go to, a bargain made: seal it, seal it; I'll be thewitness. Here I hold your hand, here my cousin's.If ever you prove false one to another, since I havetaken such pains to bring you together, let allpitiful goers-between be called to the world's endafter my name; call them all Pandars; let allconstant men be Troiluses, all false women Cressids,and all brokers-between Pandars! say, amen.

TROILUS

Amen.

CRESSIDA

Amen.

PANDARUS

Amen. Whereupon I will show you a chamber with abed; which bed, because it shall not speak of yourpretty encounters, press it to death: away!And Cupid grant all tongue-tied maidens hereBed, chamber, Pandar to provide this gear!

Exeunt

SCENE III. The Grecian camp. Before Achilles' tent.

Now, princes, for the service I have done you,The advantage of the time prompts me aloudTo call for recompense. Appear it to your mindThat, through the sight I bear in things to love,I have abandon'd Troy, left my possession,Incurr'd a traitor's name; exposed myself,From certain and possess'd conveniences,To doubtful fortunes; sequestering from me allThat time, acquaintance, custom and conditionMade tame and most familiar to my nature,And here, to do you service, am becomeAs new into the world, strange, unacquainted:I do beseech you, as in way of taste,To give me now a little benefit,Out of those many register'd in promise,Which, you say, live to come in my behalf.

AGAMEMNON

What wouldst thou of us, Trojan? make demand.

CALCHAS

You have a Trojan prisoner, call'd Antenor,Yesterday took: Troy holds him very dear.Oft have you--often have you thanks therefore--Desired my Cressid in right great exchange,Whom Troy hath still denied: but this Antenor,I know, is such a wrest in their affairsThat their negotiations all must slack,Wanting his manage; and they will almostGive us a prince of blood, a son of Priam,In change of him: let him be sent, great princes,And he shall buy my daughter; and her presenceShall quite strike off all service I have done,In most accepted pain.

AGAMEMNON

Let Diomedes bear him,And bring us Cressid hither: Calchas shall haveWhat he requests of us. Good Diomed,Furnish you fairly for this interchange:Withal bring word if Hector will to-morrowBe answer'd in his challenge: Ajax is ready.

DIOMEDES

This shall I undertake; and 'tis a burdenWhich I am proud to bear.

Exeunt DIOMEDES and CALCHAS

Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS, before their tent

ULYSSES

Achilles stands i' the entrance of his tent:Please it our general to pass strangely by him,As if he were forgot; and, princes all,Lay negligent and loose regard upon him:I will come last. 'Tis like he'll question meWhy such unplausive eyes are bent on him:If so, I have derision medicinable,To use between your strangeness and his pride,Which his own will shall have desire to drink:It may be good: pride hath no other glassTo show itself but pride, for supple kneesFeed arrogance and are the proud man's fees.

AGAMEMNON

We'll execute your purpose, and put onA form of strangeness as we pass along:So do each lord, and either greet him not,Or else disdainfully, which shall shake him moreThan if not look'd on. I will lead the way.

ACHILLES

What, comes the general to speak with me?You know my mind, I'll fight no more 'gainst Troy.

AGAMEMNON

What says Achilles? would he aught with us?

NESTOR

Would you, my lord, aught with the general?

ACHILLES

No.

NESTOR

Nothing, my lord.

AGAMEMNON

The better.

Exeunt AGAMEMNON and NESTOR

ACHILLES

Good day, good day.

MENELAUS

How do you? how do you?

Exit

ACHILLES

What, does the cuckold scorn me?

AJAX

How now, Patroclus!

ACHILLES

Good morrow, Ajax.

AJAX

Ha?

ACHILLES

Good morrow.

AJAX

Ay, and good next day too.

Exit

ACHILLES

What mean these fellows? Know they not Achilles?

PATROCLUS

They pass by strangely: they were used to bendTo send their smiles before them to Achilles;To come as humbly as they used to creepTo holy altars.

ACHILLES

What, am I poor of late?'Tis certain, greatness, once fall'n out with fortune,Must fall out with men too: what the declined isHe shall as soon read in the eyes of othersAs feel in his own fall; for men, like butterflies,Show not their mealy wings but to the summer,And not a man, for being simply man,Hath any honour, but honour for those honoursThat are without him, as place, riches, favour,Prizes of accident as oft as merit:Which when they fall, as being slippery standers,The love that lean'd on them as slippery too,Do one pluck down another and togetherDie in the fall. But 'tis not so with me:Fortune and I are friends: I do enjoyAt ample point all that I did possess,Save these men's looks; who do, methinks, find outSomething not worth in me such rich beholdingAs they have often given. Here is Ulysses;I'll interrupt his reading.How now Ulysses!

ULYSSES

Now, great Thetis' son!

ACHILLES

What are you reading?

ULYSSES

A strange fellow hereWrites me: 'That man, how dearly ever parted,How much in having, or without or in,Cannot make boast to have that which he hath,Nor feels not what he owes, but by reflection;As when his virtues shining upon othersHeat them and they retort that heat againTo the first giver.'

ACHILLES

This is not strange, Ulysses.The beauty that is borne here in the faceThe bearer knows not, but commends itselfTo others' eyes; nor doth the eye itself,That most pure spirit of sense, behold itself,Not going from itself; but eye to eye opposedSalutes each other with each other's form;For speculation turns not to itself,Till it hath travell'd and is mirror'd thereWhere it may see itself. This is not strange at all.

ULYSSES

I do not strain at the position,--It is familiar,--but at the author's drift;Who, in his circumstance, expressly provesThat no man is the lord of any thing,Though in and of him there be much consisting,Till he communicate his parts to others:Nor doth he of himself know them for aughtTill he behold them form'd in the applauseWhere they're extended; who, like an arch,reverberatesThe voice again, or, like a gate of steelFronting the sun, receives and renders backHis figure and his heat. I was much wrapt in this;And apprehended here immediatelyThe unknown Ajax.Heavens, what a man is there! a very horse,That has he knows not what. Nature, what things there areMost abject in regard and dear in use!What things again most dear in the esteemAnd poor in worth! Now shall we see to-morrow--An act that very chance doth throw upon him--Ajax renown'd. O heavens, what some men do,While some men leave to do!How some men creep in skittish fortune's hall,Whiles others play the idiots in her eyes!How one man eats into another's pride,While pride is fasting in his wantonness!To see these Grecian lords!--why, even alreadyThey clap the lubber Ajax on the shoulder,As if his foot were on brave Hector's breastAnd great Troy shrieking.

ACHILLES

I do believe it; for they pass'd by meAs misers do by beggars, neither gave to meGood word nor look: what, are my deeds forgot?

ULYSSES

Time hath, my lord, a wallet at his back,Wherein he puts alms for oblivion,A great-sized monster of ingratitudes:Those scraps are good deeds past; which are devour'dAs fast as they are made, forgot as soonAs done: perseverance, dear my lord,Keeps honour bright: to have done is to hangQuite out of fashion, like a rusty mailIn monumental mockery. Take the instant way;For honour travels in a strait so narrow,Where one but goes abreast: keep then the path;For emulation hath a thousand sonsThat one by one pursue: if you give way,Or hedge aside from the direct forthright,Like to an enter'd tide, they all rush byAnd leave you hindmost;Or like a gallant horse fall'n in first rank,Lie there for pavement to the abject rear,O'er-run and trampled on: then what they do in present,Though less than yours in past, must o'ertop yours;For time is like a fashionable hostThat slightly shakes his parting guest by the hand,And with his arms outstretch'd, as he would fly,Grasps in the comer: welcome ever smiles,And farewell goes out sighing. O, let notvirtue seekRemuneration for the thing it was;For beauty, wit,High birth, vigour of bone, desert in service,Love, friendship, charity, are subjects allTo envious and calumniating time.One touch of nature makes the whole world kin,That all with one consent praise new-born gawds,Though they are made and moulded of things past,And give to dust that is a little giltMore laud than gilt o'er-dusted.The present eye praises the present object.Then marvel not, thou great and complete man,That all the Greeks begin to worship Ajax;Since things in motion sooner catch the eyeThan what not stirs. The cry went once on thee,And still it might, and yet it may again,If thou wouldst not entomb thyself aliveAnd case thy reputation in thy tent;Whose glorious deeds, but in these fields of late,Made emulous missions 'mongst the gods themselvesAnd drave great Mars to faction.

ACHILLES

Of this my privacyI have strong reasons.

ULYSSES

But 'gainst your privacyThe reasons are more potent and heroical:'Tis known, Achilles, that you are in loveWith one of Priam's daughters.

ACHILLES

Ha! known!

ULYSSES

Is that a wonder?The providence that's in a watchful stateKnows almost every grain of Plutus' gold,Finds bottom in the uncomprehensive deeps,Keeps place with thought and almost, like the gods,Does thoughts unveil in their dumb cradles.There is a mystery--with whom relationDurst never meddle--in the soul of state;Which hath an operation more divineThan breath or pen can give expressure to:All the commerce that you have had with TroyAs perfectly is ours as yours, my lord;And better would it fit Achilles muchTo throw down Hector than Polyxena:But it must grieve young Pyrrhus now at home,When fame shall in our islands sound her trump,And all the Greekish girls shall tripping sing,'Great Hector's sister did Achilles win,But our great Ajax bravely beat down him.'Farewell, my lord: I as your lover speak;The fool slides o'er the ice that you should break.

Exit

PATROCLUS

To this effect, Achilles, have I moved you:A woman impudent and mannish grownIs not more loathed than an effeminate manIn time of action. I stand condemn'd for this;They think my little stomach to the warAnd your great love to me restrains you thus:Sweet, rouse yourself; and the weak wanton CupidShall from your neck unloose his amorous fold,And, like a dew-drop from the lion's mane,Be shook to air.

ACHILLES

Shall Ajax fight with Hector?

PATROCLUS

Ay, and perhaps receive much honour by him.

ACHILLES

I see my reputation is at stakeMy fame is shrewdly gored.

PATROCLUS

O, then, beware;Those wounds heal ill that men do give themselves:Omission to do what is necessarySeals a commission to a blank of danger;And danger, like an ague, subtly taintsEven then when we sit idly in the sun.

ACHILLES

Go call Thersites hither, sweet Patroclus:I'll send the fool to Ajax and desire himTo invite the Trojan lords after the combatTo see us here unarm'd: I have a woman's longing,An appetite that I am sick withal,To see great Hector in his weeds of peace,To talk with him and to behold his visage,Even to my full of view.

Enter THERSITES

A labour saved!

THERSITES

A wonder!

ACHILLES

What?

THERSITES

Ajax goes up and down the field, asking for himself.

ACHILLES

How so?

THERSITES

He must fight singly to-morrow with Hector, and is soprophetically proud of an heroical cudgelling that heraves in saying nothing.

ACHILLES

How can that be?

THERSITES

Why, he stalks up and down like a peacock,--a strideand a stand: ruminates like an hostess that hath noarithmetic but her brain to set down her reckoning:bites his lip with a politic regard, as who shouldsay 'There were wit in this head, an 'twould out;'and so there is, but it lies as coldly in him as firein a flint, which will not show without knocking.The man's undone forever; for if Hector break not hisneck i' the combat, he'll break 't himself invain-glory. He knows not me: I said 'Good morrow,Ajax;' and he replies 'Thanks, Agamemnon.' What thinkyou of this man that takes me for the general? He'sgrown a very land-fish, language-less, a monster.A plague of opinion! a man may wear it on bothsides, like a leather jerkin.

ACHILLES

Thou must be my ambassador to him, Thersites.

THERSITES

Who, I? why, he'll answer nobody; he professes notanswering: speaking is for beggars; he wears histongue in's arms. I will put on his presence: letPatroclus make demands to me, you shall see thepageant of Ajax.

ACHILLES

To him, Patroclus; tell him I humbly desire thevaliant Ajax to invite the most valorous Hectorto come unarmed to my tent, and to procuresafe-conduct for his person of the magnanimousand most illustrious six-or-seven-times-honouredcaptain-general of the Grecian army, Agamemnon,et cetera. Do this.

PATROCLUS

Jove bless great Ajax!

THERSITES

Hum!

PATROCLUS

I come from the worthy Achilles,--

THERSITES

Ha!

PATROCLUS

Who most humbly desires you to invite Hector to his tent,--

THERSITES

Hum!

PATROCLUS

And to procure safe-conduct from Agamemnon.

THERSITES

Agamemnon!

PATROCLUS

Ay, my lord.

THERSITES

Ha!

PATROCLUS

What say you to't?

THERSITES

God b' wi' you, with all my heart.

PATROCLUS

Your answer, sir.

THERSITES

If to-morrow be a fair day, by eleven o'clock it willgo one way or other: howsoever, he shall pay for meere he has me.

PATROCLUS

Your answer, sir.

THERSITES

Fare you well, with all my heart.

ACHILLES

Why, but he is not in this tune, is he?

THERSITES

No, but he's out o' tune thus. What music will be inhim when Hector has knocked out his brains, I knownot; but, I am sure, none, unless the fiddler Apolloget his sinews to make catlings on.

ACHILLES

Come, thou shalt bear a letter to him straight.

THERSITES

Let me bear another to his horse; for that's the morecapable creature.

ACHILLES

My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirr'd;And I myself see not the bottom of it.

Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCLUS

THERSITES

Would the fountain of your mind were clear again,that I might water an ass at it! I had rather be atick in a sheep than such a valiant ignorance.

Exit

ACT IV

SCENE I. Troy. A street.

Enter, from one side, AENEAS, and Servant with a torch; from the other, PARIS, DEIPHOBUS, ANTENOR, DIOMEDES, and others, with torches

PARIS

See, ho! who is that there?

DEIPHOBUS

It is the Lord AEneas.

AENEAS

Is the prince there in person?Had I so good occasion to lie longAs you, prince Paris, nothing but heavenly businessShould rob my bed-mate of my company.

DIOMEDES

That's my mind too. Good morrow, Lord AEneas.

PARIS

A valiant Greek, AEneas,--take his hand,--Witness the process of your speech, whereinYou told how Diomed, a whole week by days,Did haunt you in the field.

AENEAS

Health to you, valiant sir,During all question of the gentle truce;But when I meet you arm'd, as black defianceAs heart can think or courage execute.

DIOMEDES

The one and other Diomed embraces.Our bloods are now in calm; and, so long, health!But when contention and occasion meet,By Jove, I'll play the hunter for thy lifeWith all my force, pursuit and policy.

AENEAS

And thou shalt hunt a lion, that will flyWith his face backward. In humane gentleness,Welcome to Troy! now, by Anchises' life,Welcome, indeed! By Venus' hand I swear,No man alive can love in such a sortThe thing he means to kill more excellently.

DIOMEDES

We sympathize: Jove, let AEneas live,If to my sword his fate be not the glory,A thousand complete courses of the sun!But, in mine emulous honour, let him die,With every joint a wound, and that to-morrow!

AENEAS

We know each other well.

DIOMEDES

We do; and long to know each other worse.

PARIS

This is the most despiteful gentle greeting,The noblest hateful love, that e'er I heard of.What business, lord, so early?

AENEAS

I was sent for to the king; but why, I know not.

PARIS

His purpose meets you: 'twas to bring this GreekTo Calchas' house, and there to render him,For the enfreed Antenor, the fair Cressid:Let's have your company, or, if you please,Haste there before us: I constantly do think--Or rather, call my thought a certain knowledge--My brother Troilus lodges there to-night:Rouse him and give him note of our approach.With the whole quality wherefore: I fearWe shall be much unwelcome.

AENEAS

That I assure you:Troilus had rather Troy were borne to GreeceThan Cressid borne from Troy.

PARIS

There is no help;The bitter disposition of the timeWill have it so. On, lord; we'll follow you.

Both alike:He merits well to have her, that doth seek her,Not making any scruple of her soilure,With such a hell of pain and world of charge,And you as well to keep her, that defend her,Not palating the taste of her dishonour,With such a costly loss of wealth and friends:He, like a puling cuckold, would drink upThe lees and dregs of a flat tamed piece;You, like a lecher, out of whorish loinsAre pleased to breed out your inheritors:Both merits poised, each weighs nor less nor more;But he as he, the heavier for a whore.

PARIS

You are too bitter to your countrywoman.

DIOMEDES

She's bitter to her country: hear me, Paris:For every false drop in her bawdy veinsA Grecian's life hath sunk; for every scrupleOf her contaminated carrion weight,A Trojan hath been slain: since she could speak,She hath not given so many good words breathAs for her Greeks and Trojans suffer'd death.

PARIS

Fair Diomed, you do as chapmen do,Dispraise the thing that you desire to buy:But we in silence hold this virtue well,We'll but commend what we intend to sell.Here lies our way.

Ha! ha! Alas, poor wretch! ah, poor capocchia!hast not slept to-night? would he not, a naughtyman, let it sleep? a bugbear take him!

CRESSIDA

Did not I tell you? Would he were knock'd i' the head!

Knocking within

Who's that at door? good uncle, go and see.My lord, come you again into my chamber:You smile and mock me, as if I meant naughtily.

TROILUS

Ha, ha!

CRESSIDA

Come, you are deceived, I think of no such thing.

Knocking within

How earnestly they knock! Pray you, come in:I would not for half Troy have you seen here.

Exeunt TROILUS and CRESSIDA

PANDARUS

Who's there? what's the matter? will you beatdown the door? How now! what's the matter?

Enter AENEAS

AENEAS

Good morrow, lord, good morrow.

PANDARUS

Who's there? my Lord AEneas! By my troth,I knew you not: what news with you so early?

AENEAS

Is not Prince Troilus here?

PANDARUS

Here! what should he do here?

AENEAS

Come, he is here, my lord; do not deny him:It doth import him much to speak with me.

PANDARUS

Is he here, say you? 'tis more than I know, I'llbe sworn: for my own part, I came in late. Whatshould he do here?

AENEAS

Who!--nay, then: come, come, you'll do him wrongere you're ware: you'll be so true to him, to befalse to him: do not you know of him, but yet gofetch him hither; go.

Re-enter TROILUS

TROILUS

How now! what's the matter?

AENEAS

My lord, I scarce have leisure to salute you,My matter is so rash: there is at handParis your brother, and Deiphobus,The Grecian Diomed, and our AntenorDeliver'd to us; and for him forthwith,Ere the first sacrifice, within this hour,We must give up to Diomedes' handThe Lady Cressida.

TROILUS

Is it so concluded?

AENEAS

By Priam and the general state of Troy:They are at hand and ready to effect it.

Prithee, get thee in: would thou hadst ne'er beenborn! I knew thou wouldst be his death. O, poorgentleman! A plague upon Antenor!

CRESSIDA

Good uncle, I beseech you, on my knees! beseech you,what's the matter?

PANDARUS

Thou must be gone, wench, thou must be gone; thouart changed for Antenor: thou must to thy father,and be gone from Troilus: 'twill be his death;'twill be his bane; he cannot bear it.

CRESSIDA

O you immortal gods! I will not go.

PANDARUS

Thou must.

CRESSIDA

I will not, uncle: I have forgot my father;I know no touch of consanguinity;No kin no love, no blood, no soul so near meAs the sweet Troilus. O you gods divine!Make Cressid's name the very crown of falsehood,If ever she leave Troilus! Time, force, and death,Do to this body what extremes you can;But the strong base and building of my loveIs as the very centre of the earth,Drawing all things to it. I'll go in and weep,--

SCENE III. The same. Street before Pandarus' house.

It is great morning, and the hour prefix'dOf her delivery to this valiant GreekComes fast upon. Good my brother Troilus,Tell you the lady what she is to do,And haste her to the purpose.

TROILUS

Walk into her house;I'll bring her to the Grecian presently:And to his hand when I deliver her,Think it an altar, and thy brother TroilusA priest there offering to it his own heart.

Exit

PARIS

I know what 'tis to love;And would, as I shall pity, I could help!Please you walk in, my lords.

Exeunt

SCENE IV. The same. Pandarus' house.

Enter PANDARUS and CRESSIDA

PANDARUS

Be moderate, be moderate.

CRESSIDA

Why tell you me of moderation?The grief is fine, full, perfect, that I taste,And violenteth in a sense as strongAs that which causeth it: how can I moderate it?If I could temporize with my affection,Or brew it to a weak and colder palate,The like allayment could I give my grief.My love admits no qualifying dross;No more my grief, in such a precious loss.

PANDARUS

Here, here, here he comes.

Enter TROILUS

Ah, sweet ducks!

CRESSIDA

O Troilus! Troilus!

Embracing him

PANDARUS

What a pair of spectacles is here!Let me embrace too. 'O heart,' as the goodly saying is,'--O heart, heavy heart,Why sigh'st thou without breaking?where he answers again,'Because thou canst not ease thy smartBy friendship nor by speaking.'There was never a truer rhyme. Let us cast awaynothing, for we may live to have need of such averse: we see it, we see it. How now, lambs?

TROILUS

Cressid, I love thee in so strain'd a purity,That the bless'd gods, as angry with my fancy,More bright in zeal than the devotion whichCold lips blow to their deities, take thee from me.

CRESSIDA

Have the gods envy?

PANDARUS

Ay, ay, ay, ay; 'tis too plain a case.

CRESSIDA

And is it true that I must go from Troy?

TROILUS

A hateful truth.

CRESSIDA

What, and from Troilus too?

TROILUS

From Troy and Troilus.

CRESSIDA

Is it possible?

TROILUS

And suddenly; where injury of chancePuts back leave-taking, justles roughly byAll time of pause, rudely beguiles our lipsOf all rejoindure, forcibly preventsOur lock'd embrasures, strangles our dear vowsEven in the birth of our own labouring breath:We two, that with so many thousand sighsDid buy each other, must poorly sell ourselvesWith the rude brevity and discharge of one.Injurious time now with a robber's hasteCrams his rich thievery up, he knows not how:As many farewells as be stars in heaven,With distinct breath and consign'd kisses to them,He fumbles up into a lose adieu,And scants us with a single famish'd kiss,Distasted with the salt of broken tears.

AENEAS

[Within] My lord, is the lady ready?

TROILUS

Hark! you are call'd: some say the Genius soCries 'come' to him that instantly must die.Bid them have patience; she shall come anon.

PANDARUS

Where are my tears? rain, to lay this wind, ormy heart will be blown up by the root.

Exit

CRESSIDA

I must then to the Grecians?

TROILUS

No remedy.

CRESSIDA

A woful Cressid 'mongst the merry Greeks!When shall we see again?

TROILUS

Hear me, my love: be thou but true of heart,--

CRESSIDA

I true! how now! what wicked deem is this?

TROILUS

Nay, we must use expostulation kindly,For it is parting from us:I speak not 'be thou true,' as fearing thee,For I will throw my glove to Death himself,That there's no maculation in thy heart:But 'be thou true,' say I, to fashion inMy sequent protestation; be thou true,And I will see thee.

CRESSIDA

O, you shall be exposed, my lord, to dangersAs infinite as imminent! but I'll be true.

TROILUS

And I'll grow friend with danger. Wear this sleeve.

CRESSIDA

And you this glove. When shall I see you?

TROILUS

I will corrupt the Grecian sentinels,To give thee nightly visitation.But yet be true.

CRESSIDA

O heavens! 'be true' again!

TROILUS

Hear while I speak it, love:The Grecian youths are full of quality;They're loving, well composed with gifts of nature,Flowing and swelling o'er with arts and exercise:How novelty may move, and parts with person,Alas, a kind of godly jealousy--Which, I beseech you, call a virtuous sin--Makes me afeard.

CRESSIDA

O heavens! you love me not.

TROILUS

Die I a villain, then!In this I do not call your faith in questionSo mainly as my merit: I cannot sing,Nor heel the high lavolt, nor sweeten talk,Nor play at subtle games; fair virtues all,To which the Grecians are most prompt and pregnant:But I can tell that in each grace of theseThere lurks a still and dumb-discoursive devilThat tempts most cunningly: but be not tempted.

CRESSIDA

Do you think I will?

TROILUS

No.But something may be done that we will not:And sometimes we are devils to ourselves,When we will tempt the frailty of our powers,Presuming on their changeful potency.

AENEAS

[Within] Nay, good my lord,--

TROILUS

Come, kiss; and let us part.

PARIS

[Within] Brother Troilus!

TROILUS

Good brother, come you hither;And bring AEneas and the Grecian with you.

CRESSIDA

My lord, will you be true?

TROILUS

Who, I? alas, it is my vice, my fault:Whiles others fish with craft for great opinion,I with great truth catch mere simplicity;Whilst some with cunning gild their copper crowns,With truth and plainness I do wear mine bare.Fear not my truth: the moral of my witIs 'plain and true;' there's all the reach of it.

Enter AENEAS, PARIS, ANTENOR, DEIPHOBUS, and DIOMEDES

Welcome, Sir Diomed! here is the ladyWhich for Antenor we deliver you:At the port, lord, I'll give her to thy hand,And by the way possess thee what she is.Entreat her fair; and, by my soul, fair Greek,If e'er thou stand at mercy of my sword,Name Cressida and thy life shall be as safeAs Priam is in Ilion.

Grecian, thou dost not use me courteously,To shame the zeal of my petition to theeIn praising her: I tell thee, lord of Greece,She is as far high-soaring o'er thy praisesAs thou unworthy to be call'd her servant.I charge thee use her well, even for my charge;For, by the dreadful Pluto, if thou dost not,Though the great bulk Achilles be thy guard,I'll cut thy throat.

DIOMEDES

O, be not moved, Prince Troilus:Let me be privileged by my place and message,To be a speaker free; when I am henceI'll answer to my lust: and know you, lord,I'll nothing do on charge: to her own worthShe shall be prized; but that you say 'be't so,'I'll speak it in my spirit and honour, 'no.'

SCENE V. The Grecian camp. Lists set out.

Here art thou in appointment fresh and fair,Anticipating time with starting courage.Give with thy trumpet a loud note to Troy,Thou dreadful Ajax; that the appalled airMay pierce the head of the great combatantAnd hale him hither.

'Tis he, I ken the manner of his gait;He rises on the toe: that spirit of hisIn aspiration lifts him from the earth.

Enter DIOMEDES, with CRESSIDA

AGAMEMNON

Is this the Lady Cressid?

DIOMEDES

Even she.

AGAMEMNON

Most dearly welcome to the Greeks, sweet lady.

NESTOR

Our general doth salute you with a kiss.

ULYSSES

Yet is the kindness but particular;'Twere better she were kiss'd in general.

NESTOR

And very courtly counsel: I'll begin.So much for Nestor.

ACHILLES

I'll take what winter from your lips, fair lady:Achilles bids you welcome.

MENELAUS

I had good argument for kissing once.

PATROCLUS

But that's no argument for kissing now;For this popp'd Paris in his hardiment,And parted thus you and your argument.

ULYSSES

O deadly gall, and theme of all our scorns!For which we lose our heads to gild his horns.

PATROCLUS

The first was Menelaus' kiss; this, mine:Patroclus kisses you.

MENELAUS

O, this is trim!

PATROCLUS

Paris and I kiss evermore for him.

MENELAUS

I'll have my kiss, sir. Lady, by your leave.

CRESSIDA

In kissing, do you render or receive?

PATROCLUS

Both take and give.

CRESSIDA

I'll make my match to live,The kiss you take is better than you give;Therefore no kiss.

MENELAUS

I'll give you boot, I'll give you three for one.

CRESSIDA

You're an odd man; give even or give none.

MENELAUS

An odd man, lady! every man is odd.

CRESSIDA

No, Paris is not; for you know 'tis true,That you are odd, and he is even with you.

MENELAUS

You fillip me o' the head.

CRESSIDA

No, I'll be sworn.

ULYSSES

It were no match, your nail against his horn.May I, sweet lady, beg a kiss of you?

CRESSIDA

You may.

ULYSSES

I do desire it.

CRESSIDA

Why, beg, then.

ULYSSES

Why then for Venus' sake, give me a kiss,When Helen is a maid again, and his.

CRESSIDA

I am your debtor, claim it when 'tis due.

ULYSSES

Never's my day, and then a kiss of you.

DIOMEDES

Lady, a word: I'll bring you to your father.

Exit with CRESSIDA

NESTOR

A woman of quick sense.

ULYSSES

Fie, fie upon her!There's language in her eye, her cheek, her lip,Nay, her foot speaks; her wanton spirits look outAt every joint and motive of her body.O, these encounterers, so glib of tongue,That give accosting welcome ere it comes,And wide unclasp the tables of their thoughtsTo every ticklish reader! set them downFor sluttish spoils of opportunityAnd daughters of the game.

Trumpet within

ALL

The Trojans' trumpet.

AGAMEMNON

Yonder comes the troop.

Enter HECTOR, armed; AENEAS, TROILUS, and other Trojans, with Attendants

AENEAS

Hail, all you state of Greece! what shall be doneTo him that victory commands? or do you purposeA victor shall be known? will you the knightsShall to the edge of all extremityPursue each other, or shall be dividedBy any voice or order of the field?Hector bade ask.

Therefore Achilles: but, whate'er, know this:In the extremity of great and little,Valour and pride excel themselves in Hector;The one almost as infinite as all,The other blank as nothing. Weigh him well,And that which looks like pride is courtesy.This Ajax is half made of Hector's blood:In love whereof, half Hector stays at home;Half heart, half hand, half Hector comes to seekThis blended knight, half Trojan and half Greek.

ACHILLES

A maiden battle, then? O, I perceive you.

Re-enter DIOMEDES

AGAMEMNON

Here is Sir Diomed. Go, gentle knight,Stand by our Ajax: as you and Lord AEneasConsent upon the order of their fight,So be it; either to the uttermost,Or else a breath: the combatants being kinHalf stints their strife before their strokes begin.

AJAX and HECTOR enter the lists

ULYSSES

They are opposed already.

AGAMEMNON

What Trojan is that same that looks so heavy?

ULYSSES

The youngest son of Priam, a true knight,Not yet mature, yet matchless, firm of word,Speaking in deeds and deedless in his tongue;Not soon provoked nor being provoked soon calm'd:His heart and hand both open and both free;For what he has he gives, what thinks he shows;Yet gives he not till judgment guide his bounty,Nor dignifies an impure thought with breath;Manly as Hector, but more dangerous;For Hector in his blaze of wrath subscribesTo tender objects, but he in heat of actionIs more vindicative than jealous love:They call him Troilus, and on him erectA second hope, as fairly built as Hector.Thus says AEneas; one that knows the youthEven to his inches, and with private soulDid in great Ilion thus translate him to me.

Alarum. Hector and Ajax fight

AGAMEMNON

They are in action.

NESTOR

Now, Ajax, hold thine own!

TROILUS

Hector, thou sleep'st;Awake thee!

AGAMEMNON

His blows are well disposed: there, Ajax!

DIOMEDES

You must no more.

Trumpets cease

AENEAS

Princes, enough, so please you.

AJAX

I am not warm yet; let us fight again.

DIOMEDES

As Hector pleases.

HECTOR

Why, then will I no more:Thou art, great lord, my father's sister's son,A cousin-german to great Priam's seed;The obligation of our blood forbidsA gory emulation 'twixt us twain:Were thy commixtion Greek and Trojan soThat thou couldst say 'This hand is Grecian all,And this is Trojan; the sinews of this legAll Greek, and this all Troy; my mother's bloodRuns on the dexter cheek, and this sinisterBounds in my father's;' by Jove multipotent,Thou shouldst not bear from me a Greekish memberWherein my sword had not impressure madeOf our rank feud: but the just gods gainsayThat any drop thou borrow'dst from thy mother,My sacred aunt, should by my mortal swordBe drain'd! Let me embrace thee, Ajax:By him that thunders, thou hast lusty arms;Hector would have them fall upon him thus:Cousin, all honour to thee!

AJAX

I thank thee, HectorThou art too gentle and too free a man:I came to kill thee, cousin, and bear henceA great addition earned in thy death.

HECTOR

Not Neoptolemus so mirable,On whose bright crest Fame with her loud'st OyesCries 'This is he,' could promise to himselfA thought of added honour torn from Hector.

AENEAS

There is expectance here from both the sides,What further you will do.

HECTOR

We'll answer it;The issue is embracement: Ajax, farewell.

AJAX

If I might in entreaties find success--As seld I have the chance--I would desireMy famous cousin to our Grecian tents.

DIOMEDES

'Tis Agamemnon's wish, and great AchillesDoth long to see unarm'd the valiant Hector.

The worthiest of them tell me name by name;But for Achilles, mine own searching eyesShall find him by his large and portly size.

AGAMEMNON

Worthy of arms! as welcome as to oneThat would be rid of such an enemy;But that's no welcome: understand more clear,What's past and what's to come is strew'd with husksAnd formless ruin of oblivion;But in this extant moment, faith and troth,Strain'd purely from all hollow bias-drawing,Bids thee, with most divine integrity,From heart of very heart, great Hector, welcome.

O, you, my lord? by Mars his gauntlet, thanks!Mock not, that I affect the untraded oath;Your quondam wife swears still by Venus' glove:She's well, but bade me not commend her to you.

MENELAUS

Name her not now, sir; she's a deadly theme.

HECTOR

O, pardon; I offend.

NESTOR

I have, thou gallant Trojan, seen thee oftLabouring for destiny make cruel wayThrough ranks of Greekish youth, and I have seen thee,As hot as Perseus, spur thy Phrygian steed,Despising many forfeits and subduements,When thou hast hung thy advanced sword i' the air,Not letting it decline on the declined,That I have said to some my standers by'Lo, Jupiter is yonder, dealing life!'And I have seen thee pause and take thy breath,When that a ring of Greeks have hemm'd thee in,Like an Olympian wrestling: this have I seen;But this thy countenance, still lock'd in steel,I never saw till now. I knew thy grandsire,And once fought with him: he was a soldier good;But, by great Mars, the captain of us all,Never saw like thee. Let an old man embrace thee;And, worthy warrior, welcome to our tents.

AENEAS

'Tis the old Nestor.

HECTOR

Let me embrace thee, good old chronicle,That hast so long walk'd hand in hand with time:Most reverend Nestor, I am glad to clasp thee.

NESTOR

I would my arms could match thee in contention,As they contend with thee in courtesy.

HECTOR

I would they could.

NESTOR

Ha!By this white beard, I'ld fight with thee to-morrow.Well, welcome, welcome! I have seen the time.

ULYSSES

I wonder now how yonder city standsWhen we have here her base and pillar by us.

HECTOR

I know your favour, Lord Ulysses, well.Ah, sir, there's many a Greek and Trojan dead,Since first I saw yourself and DiomedIn Ilion, on your Greekish embassy.

ULYSSES

Sir, I foretold you then what would ensue:My prophecy is but half his journey yet;For yonder walls, that pertly front your town,Yond towers, whose wanton tops do buss the clouds,Must kiss their own feet.

HECTOR

I must not believe you:There they stand yet, and modestly I think,The fall of every Phrygian stone will costA drop of Grecian blood: the end crowns all,And that old common arbitrator, Time,Will one day end it.

ULYSSES

So to him we leave it.Most gentle and most valiant Hector, welcome:After the general, I beseech you nextTo feast with me and see me at my tent.

Thou art too brief: I will the second time,As I would buy thee, view thee limb by limb.

HECTOR

O, like a book of sport thou'lt read me o'er;But there's more in me than thou understand'st.Why dost thou so oppress me with thine eye?

ACHILLES

Tell me, you heavens, in which part of his bodyShall I destroy him? whether there, or there, or there?That I may give the local wound a nameAnd make distinct the very breach whereoutHector's great spirit flew: answer me, heavens!

HECTOR

It would discredit the blest gods, proud man,To answer such a question: stand again:Think'st thou to catch my life so pleasantlyAs to prenominate in nice conjectureWhere thou wilt hit me dead?

Do not chafe thee, cousin:And you, Achilles, let these threats alone,Till accident or purpose bring you to't:You may have every day enough of HectorIf you have stomach; the general state, I fear,Can scarce entreat you to be odd with him.

HECTOR

I pray you, let us see you in the field:We have had pelting wars, since you refusedThe Grecians' cause.

First, all you peers of Greece, go to my tent;There in the full convive we: afterwards,As Hector's leisure and your bounties shallConcur together, severally entreat him.Beat loud the tabourines, let the trumpets blow,That this great soldier may his welcome know.

Exeunt all except TROILUS and ULYSSES

TROILUS

My Lord Ulysses, tell me, I beseech you,In what place of the field doth Calchas keep?

ULYSSES

At Menelaus' tent, most princely Troilus:There Diomed doth feast with him to-night;Who neither looks upon the heaven nor earth,But gives all gaze and bent of amorous viewOn the fair Cressid.

TROILUS

Shall sweet lord, be bound to you so much,After we part from Agamemnon's tent,To bring me thither?

ULYSSES

You shall command me, sir.As gentle tell me, of what honour wasThis Cressida in Troy? Had she no lover thereThat wails her absence?

TROILUS

O, sir, to such as boasting show their scarsA mock is due. Will you walk on, my lord?She was beloved, she loved; she is, and doth:But still sweet love is food for fortune's tooth.

Exeunt

ACT V

SCENE I. The Grecian camp. Before Achilles' tent.

Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS

ACHILLES

I'll heat his blood with Greekish wine to-night,Which with my scimitar I'll cool to-morrow.Patroclus, let us feast him to the height.

PATROCLUS

Here comes Thersites.

Enter THERSITES

ACHILLES

How now, thou core of envy!Thou crusty batch of nature, what's the news?

THERSITES

Why, thou picture of what thou seemest, and idolof idiot worshippers, here's a letter for thee.

ACHILLES

From whence, fragment?

THERSITES

Why, thou full dish of fool, from Troy.

PATROCLUS

Who keeps the tent now?

THERSITES

The surgeon's box, or the patient's wound.

PATROCLUS

Well said, adversity! and what need these tricks?

THERSITES

Prithee, be silent, boy; I profit not by thy talk:thou art thought to be Achilles' male varlet.

No! why art thou then exasperate, thou idleimmaterial skein of sleave-silk, thou green sarcenetflap for a sore eye, thou tassel of a prodigal'spurse, thou? Ah, how the poor world is pesteredwith such waterflies, diminutives of nature!

PATROCLUS

Out, gall!

THERSITES

Finch-egg!

ACHILLES

My sweet Patroclus, I am thwarted quiteFrom my great purpose in to-morrow's battle.Here is a letter from Queen Hecuba,A token from her daughter, my fair love,Both taxing me and gaging me to keepAn oath that I have sworn. I will not break it:Fall Greeks; fail fame; honour or go or stay;My major vow lies here, this I'll obey.Come, come, Thersites, help to trim my tent:This night in banqueting must all be spent.Away, Patroclus!

Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCLUS

THERSITES

With too much blood and too little brain, these twomay run mad; but, if with too much brain and toolittle blood they do, I'll be a curer of madmen.Here's Agamemnon, an honest fellow enough and onethat loves quails; but he has not so much brain asearwax: and the goodly transformation of Jupiterthere, his brother, the bull,--the primitive statue,and oblique memorial of cuckolds; a thriftyshoeing-horn in a chain, hanging at his brother'sleg,--to what form but that he is, should wit lardedwith malice and malice forced with wit turn him to?To an ass, were nothing; he is both ass and ox: toan ox, were nothing; he is both ox and ass. To be adog, a mule, a cat, a fitchew, a toad, a lizard, anowl, a puttock, or a herring without a roe, I wouldnot care; but to be Menelaus, I would conspireagainst destiny. Ask me not, what I would be, if Iwere not Thersites; for I care not to be the louseof a lazar, so I were not Menelaus! Hey-day!spirits and fires!

So now, fair prince of Troy, I bid good night.Ajax commands the guard to tend on you.

HECTOR

Thanks and good night to the Greeks' general.

MENELAUS

Good night, my lord.

HECTOR

Good night, sweet lord Menelaus.

THERSITES

Sweet draught: 'sweet' quoth 'a! sweet sink,sweet sewer.

ACHILLES

Good night and welcome, both at once, to thoseThat go or tarry.

AGAMEMNON

Good night.

Exeunt AGAMEMNON and MENELAUS

ACHILLES

Old Nestor tarries; and you too, Diomed,Keep Hector company an hour or two.

DIOMEDES

I cannot, lord; I have important business,The tide whereof is now. Good night, great Hector.

HECTOR

Give me your hand.

ULYSSES

[Aside to TROILUS] Follow his torch; he goes toCalchas' tent:I'll keep you company.

TROILUS

Sweet sir, you honour me.

HECTOR

And so, good night.

Exit DIOMEDES; ULYSSES and TROILUS following

ACHILLES

Come, come, enter my tent.

Exeunt ACHILLES, HECTOR, AJAX, and NESTOR

THERSITES

That same Diomed's a false-hearted rogue, a mostunjust knave; I will no more trust him when he leersthan I will a serpent when he hisses: he will spendhis mouth, and promise, like Brabbler the hound:but when he performs, astronomers foretell it; itis prodigious, there will come some change; the sunborrows of the moon, when Diomed keeps hisword. I will rather leave to see Hector, thannot to dog him: they say he keeps a Trojandrab, and uses the traitor Calchas' tent: I'llafter. Nothing but lechery! all incontinent varlets!

Exit

SCENE II. The same. Before Calchas' tent.

Enter DIOMEDES

DIOMEDES

What, are you up here, ho? speak.

CALCHAS

[Within] Who calls?

DIOMEDES

Calchas, I think. Where's your daughter?

CALCHAS

[Within] She comes to you.

Enter TROILUS and ULYSSES, at a distance; after them, THERSITES

ULYSSES

Stand where the torch may not discover us.

Enter CRESSIDA

TROILUS

Cressid comes forth to him.

DIOMEDES

How now, my charge!

CRESSIDA

Now, my sweet guardian! Hark, a word with you.

Whispers

TROILUS

Yea, so familiar!

ULYSSES

She will sing any man at first sight.

THERSITES

And any man may sing her, if he can take her cliff;she's noted.

DIOMEDES

Will you remember?

CRESSIDA

Remember! yes.

DIOMEDES

Nay, but do, then;And let your mind be coupled with your words.

TROILUS

What should she remember?

ULYSSES

List.

CRESSIDA

Sweet honey Greek, tempt me no more to folly.

THERSITES

Roguery!

DIOMEDES

Nay, then,--

CRESSIDA

I'll tell you what,--

DIOMEDES

Foh, foh! come, tell a pin: you are forsworn.

CRESSIDA

In faith, I cannot: what would you have me do?

THERSITES

A juggling trick,--to be secretly open.

DIOMEDES

What did you swear you would bestow on me?

CRESSIDA

I prithee, do not hold me to mine oath;Bid me do any thing but that, sweet Greek.

DIOMEDES

Good night.

TROILUS

Hold, patience!

ULYSSES

How now, Trojan!

CRESSIDA

Diomed,--

DIOMEDES

No, no, good night: I'll be your fool no more.

TROILUS

Thy better must.

CRESSIDA

Hark, one word in your ear.

TROILUS

O plague and madness!

ULYSSES

You are moved, prince; let us depart, I pray you,Lest your displeasure should enlarge itselfTo wrathful terms: this place is dangerous;The time right deadly; I beseech you, go.

It is no matter, now I have't again.I will not meet with you to-morrow night:I prithee, Diomed, visit me no more.

THERSITES

Now she sharpens: well said, whetstone!

DIOMEDES

I shall have it.

CRESSIDA

What, this?

DIOMEDES

Ay, that.

CRESSIDA

O, all you gods! O pretty, pretty pledge!Thy master now lies thinking in his bedOf thee and me, and sighs, and takes my glove,And gives memorial dainty kisses to it,As I kiss thee. Nay, do not snatch it from me;He that takes that doth take my heart withal.

DIOMEDES

I had your heart before, this follows it.

TROILUS

I did swear patience.

CRESSIDA

You shall not have it, Diomed; faith, you shall not;I'll give you something else.

DIOMEDES

I will have this: whose was it?

CRESSIDA

It is no matter.

DIOMEDES

Come, tell me whose it was.

CRESSIDA

'Twas one's that loved me better than you will.But, now you have it, take it.

DIOMEDES

Whose was it?

CRESSIDA

By all Diana's waiting-women yond,And by herself, I will not tell you whose.

DIOMEDES

To-morrow will I wear it on my helm,And grieve his spirit that dares not challenge it.

TROILUS

Wert thou the devil, and worest it on thy horn,It should be challenged.

CRESSIDA

Well, well, 'tis done, 'tis past: and yet it is not;I will not keep my word.

DIOMEDES

Why, then, farewell;Thou never shalt mock Diomed again.

CRESSIDA

You shall not go: one cannot speak a word,But it straight starts you.

DIOMEDES

I do not like this fooling.

THERSITES

Nor I, by Pluto: but that that likes not you pleases me best.

DIOMEDES

What, shall I come? the hour?

CRESSIDA

Ay, come:--O Jove!--do come:--I shall be plagued.

DIOMEDES

Farewell till then.

CRESSIDA

Good night: I prithee, come.

Exit DIOMEDES

Troilus, farewell! one eye yet looks on theeBut with my heart the other eye doth see.Ah, poor our sex! this fault in us I find,The error of our eye directs our mind:What error leads must err; O, then concludeMinds sway'd by eyes are full of turpitude.

Exit

THERSITES

A proof of strength she could not publish more,Unless she said ' My mind is now turn'd whore.'

ULYSSES

All's done, my lord.

TROILUS

It is.

ULYSSES

Why stay we, then?

TROILUS

To make a recordation to my soulOf every syllable that here was spoke.But if I tell how these two did co-act,Shall I not lie in publishing a truth?Sith yet there is a credence in my heart,An esperance so obstinately strong,That doth invert the attest of eyes and ears,As if those organs had deceptious functions,Created only to calumniate.Was Cressid here?

ULYSSES

I cannot conjure, Trojan.

TROILUS

She was not, sure.

ULYSSES

Most sure she was.

TROILUS

Why, my negation hath no taste of madness.

ULYSSES

Nor mine, my lord: Cressid was here but now.

TROILUS

Let it not be believed for womanhood!Think, we had mothers; do not give advantageTo stubborn critics, apt, without a theme,For depravation, to square the general sexBy Cressid's rule: rather think this not Cressid.

ULYSSES

What hath she done, prince, that can soil our mothers?

TROILUS

Nothing at all, unless that this were she.

THERSITES

Will he swagger himself out on's own eyes?

TROILUS

This she? no, this is Diomed's Cressida:If beauty have a soul, this is not she;If souls guide vows, if vows be sanctimonies,If sanctimony be the gods' delight,If there be rule in unity itself,This is not she. O madness of discourse,That cause sets up with and against itself!Bi-fold authority! where reason can revoltWithout perdition, and loss assume all reasonWithout revolt: this is, and is not, Cressid.Within my soul there doth conduce a fightOf this strange nature that a thing inseparateDivides more wider than the sky and earth,And yet the spacious breadth of this divisionAdmits no orifex for a point as subtleAs Ariachne's broken woof to enter.Instance, O instance! strong as Pluto's gates;Cressid is mine, tied with the bonds of heaven:Instance, O instance! strong as heaven itself;The bonds of heaven are slipp'd, dissolved, and loosed;And with another knot, five-finger-tied,The fractions of her faith, orts of her love,The fragments, scraps, the bits and greasy relicsOf her o'er-eaten faith, are bound to Diomed.

ULYSSES

May worthy Troilus be half attach'dWith that which here his passion doth express?

TROILUS

Ay, Greek; and that shall be divulged wellIn characters as red as Mars his heartInflamed with Venus: never did young man fancyWith so eternal and so fix'd a soul.Hark, Greek: as much as I do Cressid love,So much by weight hate I her Diomed:That sleeve is mine that he'll bear on his helm;Were it a casque composed by Vulcan's skill,My sword should bite it: not the dreadful spoutWhich shipmen do the hurricano call,Constringed in mass by the almighty sun,Shall dizzy with more clamour Neptune's earIn his descent than shall my prompted swordFalling on Diomed.

Would I could meet that rogue Diomed! I wouldcroak like a raven; I would bode, I would bode.Patroclus will give me any thing for theintelligence of this whore: the parrot will notdo more for an almond than he for a commodious drab.Lechery, lechery; still, wars and lechery; nothingelse holds fashion: a burning devil take them!

Exit

SCENE III. Troy. Before Priam's palace.

Enter HECTOR and ANDROMACHE

ANDROMACHE

When was my lord so much ungently temper'd,To stop his ears against admonishment?Unarm, unarm, and do not fight to-day.

HECTOR

You train me to offend you; get you in:By all the everlasting gods, I'll go!

ANDROMACHE

My dreams will, sure, prove ominous to the day.

HECTOR

No more, I say.

Enter CASSANDRA

CASSANDRA

Where is my brother Hector?

ANDROMACHE

Here, sister; arm'd, and bloody in intent.Consort with me in loud and dear petition,Pursue we him on knees; for I have dream'dOf bloody turbulence, and this whole nightHath nothing been but shapes and forms of slaughter.

CASSANDRA

O, 'tis true.

HECTOR

Ho! bid my trumpet sound!

CASSANDRA

No notes of sally, for the heavens, sweet brother.

HECTOR

Be gone, I say: the gods have heard me swear.

CASSANDRA

The gods are deaf to hot and peevish vows:They are polluted offerings, more abhorr'dThan spotted livers in the sacrifice.

ANDROMACHE

O, be persuaded! do not count it holyTo hurt by being just: it is as lawful,For we would give much, to use violent thefts,And rob in the behalf of charity.

CASSANDRA

It is the purpose that makes strong the vow;But vows to every purpose must not hold:Unarm, sweet Hector.

HECTOR

Hold you still, I say;Mine honour keeps the weather of my fate:Lie every man holds dear; but the brave manHolds honour far more precious-dear than life.

Brother, you have a vice of mercy in you,Which better fits a lion than a man.

HECTOR

What vice is that, good Troilus? chide me for it.

TROILUS

When many times the captive Grecian falls,Even in the fan and wind of your fair sword,You bid them rise, and live.

HECTOR

O,'tis fair play.

TROILUS

Fool's play, by heaven, Hector.

HECTOR

How now! how now!

TROILUS

For the love of all the gods,Let's leave the hermit pity with our mothers,And when we have our armours buckled on,The venom'd vengeance ride upon our swords,Spur them to ruthful work, rein them from ruth.

A whoreson tisick, a whoreson rascally tisick sotroubles me, and the foolish fortune of this girl;and what one thing, what another, that I shallleave you one o' these days: and I have a rheumin mine eyes too, and such an ache in my bonesthat, unless a man were cursed, I cannot tell whatto think on't. What says she there?

Go, wind, to wind, there turn and change together.My love with words and errors still she feeds;But edifies another with her deeds.

Exeunt severally

SCENE IV. Plains between Troy and the Grecian camp.

Alarums: excursions. Enter THERSITES

THERSITES

Now they are clapper-clawing one another; I'll golook on. That dissembling abominable varlets Diomed,has got that same scurvy doting foolish young knave'ssleeve of Troy there in his helm: I would fain seethem meet; that that same young Trojan ass, thatloves the whore there, might send that Greekishwhore-masterly villain, with the sleeve, back to thedissembling luxurious drab, of a sleeveless errand.O' the t'other side, the policy of those craftyswearing rascals, that stale old mouse-eaten drycheese, Nestor, and that same dog-fox, Ulysses, isnot proved worthy a blackberry: they set me up, inpolicy, that mongrel cur, Ajax, against that dog ofas bad a kind, Achilles: and now is the cur Ajaxprouder than the cur Achilles, and will not armto-day; whereupon the Grecians begin to proclaimbarbarism, and policy grows into an ill opinion.Soft! here comes sleeve, and t'other.

Enter DIOMEDES, TROILUS following

TROILUS

Fly not; for shouldst thou take the river Styx,I would swim after.

DIOMEDES

Thou dost miscall retire:I do not fly, but advantageous careWithdrew me from the odds of multitude:Have at thee!

THERSITES

Hold thy whore, Grecian!--now for thy whore,Trojan!--now the sleeve, now the sleeve!

God-a-mercy, that thou wilt believe me; but aplague break thy neck for frightening me! What'sbecome of the wenching rogues? I think they haveswallowed one another: I would laugh at thatmiracle: yet, in a sort, lechery eats itself.I'll seek them.

Exit

SCENE V. Another part of the plains.

Enter DIOMEDES and a Servant

DIOMEDES

Go, go, my servant, take thou Troilus' horse;Present the fair steed to my lady Cressid:Fellow, commend my service to her beauty;Tell her I have chastised the amorous Trojan,And am her knight by proof.

Go, bear Patroclus' body to Achilles;And bid the snail-paced Ajax arm for shame.There is a thousand Hectors in the field:Now here he fights on Galathe his horse,And there lacks work; anon he's there afoot,And there they fly or die, like scaled scullsBefore the belching whale; then is he yonder,And there the strawy Greeks, ripe for his edge,Fall down before him, like the mower's swath:Here, there, and every where, he leaves and takes,Dexterity so obeying appetiteThat what he will he does, and does so muchThat proof is call'd impossibility.

Enter ULYSSES

ULYSSES

O, courage, courage, princes! great AchillesIs arming, weeping, cursing, vowing vengeance:Patroclus' wounds have roused his drowsy blood,Together with his mangled Myrmidons,That noseless, handless, hack'd and chipp'd, come to him,Crying on Hector. Ajax hath lost a friendAnd foams at mouth, and he is arm'd and at it,Roaring for Troilus, who hath done to-dayMad and fantastic execution,Engaging and redeeming of himselfWith such a careless force and forceless careAs if that luck, in very spite of cunning,Bade him win all.

Enter AJAX

AJAX

Troilus! thou coward Troilus!

Exit

DIOMEDES

Ay, there, there.

NESTOR

So, so, we draw together.

Enter ACHILLES

ACHILLES

Where is this Hector?Come, come, thou boy-queller, show thy face;Know what it is to meet Achilles angry:Hector? where's Hector? I will none but Hector.

Exeunt

SCENE VI. Another part of the plains.

Enter AJAX

AJAX

Troilus, thou coward Troilus, show thy head!

Enter DIOMEDES

DIOMEDES

Troilus, I say! where's Troilus?

AJAX

What wouldst thou?

DIOMEDES

I would correct him.

AJAX

Were I the general, thou shouldst have my officeEre that correction. Troilus, I say! what, Troilus!

Fare thee well:I would have been much more a fresher man,Had I expected thee. How now, my brother!

Re-enter TROILUS

TROILUS

Ajax hath ta'en AEneas: shall it be?No, by the flame of yonder glorious heaven,He shall not carry him: I'll be ta'en too,Or bring him off: fate, hear me what I say!I reck not though I end my life to-day.

SCENE VII. Another part of the plains.

Enter ACHILLES, with Myrmidons

ACHILLES

Come here about me, you my Myrmidons;Mark what I say. Attend me where I wheel:Strike not a stroke, but keep yourselves in breath:And when I have the bloody Hector found,Empale him with your weapons round about;In fellest manner execute your aims.Follow me, sirs, and my proceedings eye:It is decreed Hector the great must die.

I am a bastard too; I love bastards: I am a bastardbegot, bastard instructed, bastard in mind, bastardin valour, in every thing illegitimate. One bear willnot bite another, and wherefore should one bastard?Take heed, the quarrel's most ominous to us: if theson of a whore fight for a whore, he tempts judgment:farewell, bastard.

If it be so, yet bragless let it be;Great Hector was a man as good as he.

AGAMEMNON

March patiently along: let one be sentTo pray Achilles see us at our tent.If in his death the gods have us befriended,Great Troy is ours, and our sharp wars are ended.

Exeunt, marching

SCENE X. Another part of the plains.

Enter AENEAS and Trojans

AENEAS

Stand, ho! yet are we masters of the field:Never go home; here starve we out the night.

Enter TROILUS

TROILUS

Hector is slain.

ALL

Hector! the gods forbid!

TROILUS

He's dead; and at the murderer's horse's tail,In beastly sort, dragg'd through the shameful field.Frown on, you heavens, effect your rage with speed!Sit, gods, upon your thrones, and smile at Troy!I say, at once let your brief plagues be mercy,And linger not our sure destructions on!

AENEAS

My lord, you do discomfort all the host!

TROILUS

You understand me not that tell me so:I do not speak of flight, of fear, of death,But dare all imminence that gods and menAddress their dangers in. Hector is gone:Who shall tell Priam so, or Hecuba?Let him that will a screech-owl aye be call'd,Go in to Troy, and say there, Hector's dead:There is a word will Priam turn to stone;Make wells and Niobes of the maids and wives,Cold statues of the youth, and, in a word,Scare Troy out of itself. But, march away:Hector is dead; there is no more to say.Stay yet. You vile abominable tents,Thus proudly pight upon our Phrygian plains,Let Titan rise as early as he dare,I'll through and through you! and, thou great-sized coward,No space of earth shall sunder our two hates:I'll haunt thee like a wicked conscience still,That mouldeth goblins swift as frenzy's thoughts.Strike a free march to Troy! with comfort go:Hope of revenge shall hide our inward woe.

Exeunt AENEAS and Trojans

As TROILUS is going out, enter, from the other side, PANDARUS

PANDARUS

But hear you, hear you!

TROILUS

Hence, broker-lackey! ignomy and shamePursue thy life, and live aye with thy name!

Exit

PANDARUS

A goodly medicine for my aching bones! O world!world! world! thus is the poor agent despised!O traitors and bawds, how earnestly are you seta-work, and how ill requited! why should ourendeavour be so loved and the performance so loathed?what verse for it? what instance for it? Let me see:Full merrily the humble-bee doth sing,Till he hath lost his honey and his sting;And being once subdued in armed tail,Sweet honey and sweet notes together fail.Good traders in the flesh, set this in yourpainted cloths.As many as be here of pander's hall,Your eyes, half out, weep out at Pandar's fall;Or if you cannot weep, yet give some groans,Though not for me, yet for your aching bones.Brethren and sisters of the hold-door trade,Some two months hence my will shall here be made:It should be now, but that my fear is this,Some galled goose of Winchester would hiss:Till then I'll sweat and seek about for eases,And at that time bequeathe you my diseases.