How thrilled are you today? I am THRILLED…well, not beyond words 🙂 but I am super thrilled for you let me tell you!

Over the last 21 days you have demonstrated your commitment to living your life at the highest level possible. I am thoroughly impressed with that effort.

Your magnificent life is now, even more so than before – YOURS!

♫♫♫♫♫ C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S !!! ♫♫♫♫♫

Thank you for the joy of leading you through this process.

Now what?

Give thanks

Get the lessons

Get Going!

First and foremost give thanks, be grateful, and take a moment to appreciate your efforts over the past 21 days. Setting new goals without having some gratitude for your hard work and your accomplishments would short circuit your success.

When others do a great job we know how right it is to congratulate them and encourage them even if they didn’t reach their mark.

YOU DID!

(AND even if you stopped and started or stopped completely…you took on this challenge and gave it your best , given the reality of your life, so please, still give thanks!)

Please extend the same treatment to yourself. I recommend that you get a physical symbol to commemorate this accomplishment.

I have pebbles, rocks, beautiful stones (from free to $$) that serve me well as reminders of significant moments in life. You will be encouraged by honoring and appreciating this accomplishment appropriately.

2) Get the Lessons.What did you do really well over the past 21 days?

Highlight these things and write them down. That’s right, record them for future reference. There might come a day when you need reminding.

Look also at those things you could have done better. Record those and write a little about how and why you would do them differently.

3) Get Going. Don’t sit on your laurels. Move on to how this new habit can help you to create other new success habits.

And if there’s nothing that needs improving right about now ( compulsive self-improvement is NOT a good thing) then maybe you can get going by helping someone else to create this same success habit in their life?

Paying it forward is what it’s all about.

Can you think of a way or a person to help?

Just imagine, if most of the people in your family, or business or community or church had the powerful success habit you just created, would there be more peace, joy and prosperity in the world?

Just get going with this new and powerful success habit.

Keep it powerful too! Don’t rest this new habit on the shelf, now ☺. It’s a sure way to loose it.

Work on it by doing whatever is necessary to maintain the potency of the habit.

When someone speaks to you as if you are dim-witted, slow or generally incapable of doing something, do you feel good?

Perhaps you might be motivated to prove them wrong, if you’re “lucky.” But most folks are de-motivated.

Depending on when this takes place in your life and who does the damage, the impact on your sense of self-confidence can be devastating. Research does confirm this dynamic but even without the research, it’s a pretty self-evident fact that negativity breeds more of the same.

The negative words and messages that you or someone else puts into your psyche will, if you don’t interrupt the cycle, produce negative outcomes.

So tell me, if we know and accept this, why do we continue to engage in negative self-talk? If we don’t want others to speak to us in negative ways, why is it OK to do it to our self? (reminds me of the ‘N’ word controversy!)

In creating new success habits, negative self-talk produces the complete opposite mental posture that you need. Things like “I can’t do this,” “I always mess up,” “This is too hard for me,” don’t help you to increase your resolve and commitment. They do the opposite.

You need a positive, optimistic, self-confident posture. Changing, breaking and making habits are undertakings that require your most positive outlook. They go against everything your body yearns for – patterns are so very comfortable for humans! (especially the ones that bring some pleasure)

A negative self-image will NOT motivate you to take action daily with something as challenging as creating new and powerful success habit.

Have you ever taken a major exam or made an important presentation where you wanted/needed to do well? How did you prepare? Did you stay out all night? Did you show up to the exam hungry and dead beat? Did you not bother to study or prepare? Did you walk with no materials, pen or pencils?

If you wanted to do well, the answers here are pretty obvious. Chances are you did everything you needed to do in order to be rested, fed and prepared.

Apply that thinking here and check your self-talk. Your daily preparation for this ‘major exam’ of creating new success habits is checking your thoughts before they manifest. Before you even have a thought, you have an emotion…monitor these. They can lead down a path of self-sabotage.

Of course you can acknowledge negative emotions and maybe even sit with them for a bit – within reason, this is a good thing. However, you must exercise control over these negative emotions by not having them produce unhelpful, negative thinking and behaviors.

Remaining conscious and aware throughout this process is essential.

The things you say and the questions you ask during this crucial time will determine your success.

How to create successful habits is all about your thoughts. What are you thinking? What questions are you asking?

Is it “why am I doing this anyway?” or is it “what can I do to succeed with this effort?”

Is it “why do I always mess up?” or is it “how can I approach this project with a better attitude, this time?”

Whatever you ask, the answer for THAT question will manifest. Whatever you think, the behavior for that thought will manifest.

Think thoughts and take actions that lead to the consistently magnificent life you wish to live.

Share some of your power thoughts or questions; we would love to hear how you approach the challenging moments.

…For life to be truly balanced it has to have a ‘reach out’ component. It can’t be all about you, your family and the business. Giving something back to the community is crucial. Service is actually one of the essential habits of prosperity. Fellow-shipping with fellow church members, with neighbors and the business community is a vital part of success. And not just for the socializing piece either. We have to be part of or lead programs that help other people who are not as fortunate as we are. We all live in a community and we have a responsibility to be a player, active in some aspect of that community’s well being. Being on the sidelines is not an option.

Above is an extract from the conceptual framework of our Success Habits in 21 Days Program. I firmly believe that success is not success without service.

Today is Dr. Mani’s Tweetathon on Twitter.com/tweet_a_thon where he is tweeting for 24 hours straight to bring awareness to congenital heart disease. He’s raising $36,000 to fund 12 heart operations. He is a heart surgeon, by the way.

I got to thinking about a response I received from realmatrix – “we must do a better job @ REALLY helping people in our own Hemisphere…it will do much too repair our damaged global image…”

As I worked out today, his concern lingered in my spirit. It’s something we’ve talked about here with friends and family again and again.

Is it appropriate for our nation to run around the globe helping people with their economic or even political development when people right here in the US are not having basic needs met?

Likewise, is it OK for a Pastor/Priest/Rabbi to tend to his flock but not to his family? ( have witnessed this many times!) On a family level, I find it so sad that our boys tend to treat their friends better than they do each other. So sad to me.

Here’s how I think about it. Integrity is everything. Doing some, even a lot of good deeds all over the place may help some people but it won’t have the lasting, life- changing, legacy building kind of impact we seek IF the activities are not coming from true compassion.

Benefit to recipients is maximized when the energy of sincerity is behind a good deed. Just think about how you respond when someone helps you with true compassion versus help that comes from insincerity or obligation. Big difference, right?

If the compassion is real, the people right next to you will be attended to first, or on the basis of priority (based on a real assessment of urgency.) If the compassion is real, you won’t need to second guess yourself. No one will be able to honestly question your motives.

But a sure sign that either priorities are skewed or the compassion is insincere is taking care of the world when our own people are suffering. Or, tending to the flock when your own child needs you. That’s just not right. It’s expedient, political, “good” business and Oh so transparent!

Like a pebble rippling on the surface of a pond, with tiny circles expanding outward, start your commitment to service on the home front. Then move outward as resources – time, energy, money and manpower permit.

My Mother always taught us that “charity begins at home.” She was right. Real service begins at home.

It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home for this is where our love for each other must start.Mother Teresa

As we create new success habits, let’s be sure to think about and build the essential skill sets that support and maintain success: organization, goal-setting/gratitude, communication, continuous learning and SERVICE.

Tomorrow is the 9th day of our program – a good time to be in touch with your accountability partner.

Powerful Success Habits in 21 Days – PSH 21

Day #2

Accountability is an essential principle.

For any society to function and for any person to perform at their highest and best accountability is key.

Think of all the ways you are accountable each day – you speed or break a law, you will have a consequence if caught; you leave late for an appointment, you will be late; you behave a certain way, you get a particular response – most of the time! We couldn’t exist without accountability.

In creating new habits, we’re going ‘against the grain.’ As humans we don’t gravitate easily towards change. Accountability – basically being responsible for your actions (or no actions) makes daily commitments more reliable. Support groups are effective to the extent that accountability is part of the expectations.

In this Success Habits in 21 Days Program accountability is being used for a specific purpose: motivation. I know from personal experience of having a coach/accountability partner, I get more done, more consistently when I have to report in to someone at a specific time! From professional experience as an executive coach, without a doubt accountability works every time.

To be an effective source of motivation, there’re certain guidelines that must be followed.

Basic Guidelines of Accountability:

An attitude of Service: to be a great accountability partner, you have to want to do it; a desire to be of service is a key ingredient. Wanting the very best for your partner is essential. Wanting to do everything you can to help them stay on task is equally important. Your partner will respond at a higher level if they’re motivated by your genuine interest and desire to see them succeed.

NON-JUDGMENT: No matter what goes on with daily action items, it is not our role as an accountability partner to make any judgments about why something wasn’t done, or about our partner. Think of being judged – TOTALLY demotivating!

Consistency: Stick to the agreements of the partnership. If you agree that you will be in touch with your accountability partner to give an update – do so. And if you don’t hear from your partner, reach out to them. Create an agreement about what the ‘consequence’ will be if action is not taken as committed. And what ever is agreed to should be invoked. Hold your partner accountable! This is the whole point.

Some additional and necessary characteristics of an excellent accountability partner for this program:

Integrity (confidentiality is crucial)

Curiosity and interest in meeting new people

Commitment to self-improvement

Excellent ‘listening’ skills

I strongly recommend that you adhere to these guidelines and come to an agreement with your accountability partner about:

Frequency of contact – each person is responsible for checking in with their partner

Clarity on daily actions committed to

Consequences for IF action is not taken

Reward for when you’ve successfully created your new powerful success habit!

Congratulations on making this decision to create your powerful new success habit!

I am so *excited* about this program. It’s powerful. I find great joy in helping you to craft your magnificent life.

I hope you are equally excited about this adventure we’re on. For the next 21 days you will operate at your highest and best as you create a new and powerful success habit. It’s important that you tell your brain that you will be doing something new for 21 days – just 21 days! It will be easier to accept.

GRAB THAT IMAGE OF YOU LIVING WITH YOUR NEW HABIT and place it firmly in your mind, spirit, heart and soul. Only total commitment to action will work.

Dr. Therman Evans says, “you must behave your way into a new way of thinking and you can’t think your way into a new way of behaving.”

As a group you are working on a wide range of habits, you live all over the world in a variety of cultures but you have one powerful thing in common. You have decided to take charge of some aspect of your life and create a powerful new habit!

This blog will provide support, motivation and information. Visit it regularly throughout the 21 day period.

Be aware that the more closely you adhere to the guidelines and suggestions of this program, the more likely you are to create your new and powerful success habit.

Guidelines & Suggestions for Day 1 Activities:

1. Purchase a notebook or journal and dedicate it to this process – use for the following exercises and for daily logging (or blogging!)

2. Write a very specific and positive commitment statement about this habit. For instance – “For the next 21 days I will enjoy gaining control of my health by eliminating caffeine and replacing it with water. My new success habit is constant hydration!”

3. Write a very specific gain/loose statement. What will you gain from this new habit (be very descriptive and very specific) and what will you loose if you don’t create this new success habit? Create two columns and fill in a page of specifics.

4. Place any items, pictures, quotes or symbols that will help to keep you focused and motivated, in your journal

You may think, “I know all of this in my head, I get it.” Let me tell you, it is not enough. Writing your precious thoughts, insights and plans is mandatory if you hope to act on them and get the most benefits from them.

There’s another point too. Your willingness to follow the directions of a program is extremely significant. Often there’s this silent resistance to following guidelines that distract us from taking action. Then of course we fail to realize the results we keep seeking.

A healthy dose of humility and willingness to be guided is critical. If you sow resistance into your life, your life and all its glory will resist you back! We do reap what we sow.

Here’s another opportunity to practice non-resistance . The following 7 step strategy is your guarantee of success.

The Seven Step How-to Create Successful Habits Strategy:

1. Be committed and passionate about creating the habit you selected. It has to MEAN a lot to you. You have to be clear about the compelling reasons to do this!

2. Have a plan – Think ahead of what you will need – resources, people, time, etc- to make this happen, write out a plan of how you will approach each day. If you have a regular routine surrounding a habit you’re changing, create and commit to a substitute routine. What is your strategy for dealing with “friendly” sabotage (those ‘friends’ who don’t quite get what you’re doing and why) and challenging situations – which will appear in the form of moods, needs, emotions, “bad” days and frustrations…What’s your plan of action for handling these situations? If you have spiritual rituals or activities, it’s vital to make them part of your plan.

3. Be organized – journal daily and follow these directions. Also, block time in your day to consciously take action on your new habit.

4. Get Light! – Clear the Way – A magic moment for me this morning: I was at my kitchen window and saw a bird in my driveway, perched on top of a tarpaulin that was dropped on the ground but wasn’t flat on the ground (the blue ones, very light material.) I was thinking how amazing it was for this bird to be landing and staying on the top of a pocket of air practically. Then it walked around!…the image of it prancing around, not weighted down by any baggage, concerns or grudges actually made me laugh out loud.

The application to this program was obvious.

How light are you for this journey?

What troubles from yesterday are you taking into tomorrow while robbing you of today?

Consider what excess baggage you can leave – you can even decide to pick it back up later (let’s see if that’s going to appeal to you after NOT being weighted down by it for 21 days!)

And here’s the magic of that moment for me. I was thinking, if that bird had some piece of leaf or crumb on his wings, weighing him down, it would no doubt shake it off before flying off. And as if on cue, the bird did a shake, then another and flew off light as a feather. The bird was working along with me!

So, what can you shake off today? Habit breaking and forming can be a challenge, are you light enough for the journey?

5. Speak Success to yourself daily. This is part of having a plan too. Watch how you speak to yourself about what you’re attempting to do. VERY powerful. You know, “as a man thinketh, so he is” Also, speak with or email your accountability partner regularly to motivate them and help them to remain on task.

6. Get your heart right. Think of the best reason possible for achieving this goal of creating a powerful new success habit. With this new habit, other than yourself, who will benefit? Family? Employees? Clients and customers? The masses waiting for your product or service? How can you pay this forward? Who can you help with creating a new habit?

7. Apply what you already know, get more information only where needed. If you permit yourself, you’ll recognize how much knowledge you already have about this process, “successful habit creating” strategies. I call this APK – acknowledge your present knowledge, build on what on you know and stop wasting time re-learning old information ( a sophisticated form of procrastination.) Do research only where needed.

Reading up on the research done by Maxwell Maltz – father of this material on creating habits in 21 days, is a good idea if you’ve never heard of him or read his work. Also, finding relevant information regarding your particular habit is useful as well. ( please note: doing this “research” should not replace taking daily action with this program!)

Follow these guidelines and I promise you, you will be successful! Every successful undertaking requires a systematic strategy and, commitment to the action steps required.

Many of you have attempted to create your new habit before. All of those efforts were to prepare you for this time. This is the right time and the right place to take your life to whole other level: where your magnificence and alignment with your purpose will prevail.

How do I even get excitement of this caliber to be on paper, screen or whatever???

***Deep Breath***

How thrilled are you today?

Over the last 21 days you have demonstrated your commitment to living your life at the highest level possible. I can only be thrilled and thoroughly impressed with that effort.

Your magnificent life is now, even more so than before – YOURS!

♫♫♫♫♫ C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S !!! ♫♫♫♫♫

I’m late in posting today because I actually had a hard time containing my excitement and focusing my energies on this specific task at hand. What a joyous one it is though.

Thank you for the joy of leading you through this process.

Now what?

Give thanks

Get the lessons

Get Going!

First and foremost give thanks, be grateful, and take a moment to appreciate your efforts over the past 21 days. Setting new goals without having some gratitude for your hard work and your accomplishments would short circuit your success.

When others do a great job we know how right it is to congratulate them and encourage them even if they didn’t reach their mark.

YOU DID!

Please extend the same treatment to yourself. I recommend that you get a physical symbol to commemorate this accomplishment.

I have pebbles, rocks, beautiful stones (from free to $$) that serve me well as reminders of significant moments in life. You will be encouraged by honoring and appreciating this accomplishment appropriately.

2) Get the Lessons.What did you do really well over the past 21 days?

Highlight these things and write them down. That’s right, record them for future reference. There might come a day when you need reminding.

Look also at those things you could have done better. Record those and write a little about how and why you would do them differently.

3) Get Going. Don’t sit on your laurels. Move on to how this new habit can help you to create other new success habits.

And if there’s nothing that needs improving right about now ( compulsive self-improvement is NOT a good thing) then maybe you can get going by helping someone else to create this same habit in their life?

Paying it forward is what it’s all about.

Can you think of a way or a person to help?

Just imagine, if most of the people in your family, or business or community or church had the powerful success habit you just created, would there be more peace, joy and prosperity in the world?

Just get going with this new and powerful success habit.

Keep it powerful too! Don’t rest this new habit on the shelf, now ☺. It’s a sure way to loose it.