Classic Movies Rebooted

The Movies You Loved As A Kid Are Coming Back

There’s no reason further Gremlins adventures couldn’t be good. It’s not as if they have some intricate mythology that can’t be messed with. It’s just mutant stuffed toys breaking stuff.

Children of the '80s, buckle up, bite down on something and prepare for some possibly upsetting times. It looks like Gremlins is getting rebooted. Or getting a sequel. Anyway, Warner Bros is, according to Vulture, trying to buy the rights from Steven Spielberg’s Amblin Entertainment so it can continue the series. On the one hand, this can only bring us one step closer to the day when someone decides to remake Back To The Future and then humanity will have to end itself on principle. On the other, Gremlins are wonderful and as long as nobody decides it would be a splendid idea to now create them all in lovely shiny, soulless CG and maybe make the film a U in order to catch that valuable pre-teen market, then there’s no reason further Gremlins adventures couldn’t be good. It’s not as if they have some intricate mythology that can’t be messed with. It’s just mutant stuffed toys breaking stuff. Besides, Gremlins is far from the only late 20th century classic currently being kicked back into life for modern audiences.

Who Framed Roger RabbitAfter years and years and years of sequel discussion – at one point it was planned as a big Busby Berkeley-style musical — a follow-up to the majestic ‘80s mix of live-action and animation is finally, actually, definitely, probably on the brink of happening. Although Bob Hoskins, who played Eddie Valiant in WFRR, sadly retired from acting last year for health reasons, director Robert Zemeckis says there is a prequel script with Disney, awaiting the go-ahead (side note to Disney: Approve it or I’ll hurt you). Despite computer animation making everyone’s job much easier, Zemeckis has assured any sequel would maintain the traditional animation — or at least traditional animation look — that made the first film so charming. Which is the correct answer.

Bill and TedGenuinely happening. Mental. Though both Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves are both just a small stumble from their 50th birthdays, the pair have shown interest in once again playing goofy guitarists who save the world. There’s a director attached and everything, Dean Parisot, who made the tonally similar and similarly cultish Galaxy Quest. The script is complete but it’s still awaiting the final nod. Rumour is that it picks up 20 years after the last film, with Bill and Ted still trying to compose the song that will bestow peace upon the world.

TwinsOh the ROFLs and LOLZ we had at the incongruity of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito being brothers, back in the days when ROFL and LOL were just spelling mistakes. As part of Schwarzenegger’s return to acting, he’s agreed to make a much belated sequel to Twins, with the hilarious twist being that it’s now called Triplets and the other brother is to be played by Eddie Murphy. It’s funny because one’s giant and Austrian, another is short and the other one is black. I look forward to the third movie, in which the fourth brother is played by the dog from The Artist.

BeetlejuiceOne of Tim Burton’s weirdest and most entertaining films, Beetlejuice seems an odd bet for a sequel, since it wasn’t a huge hit and Burton has so many other projects on the go. But the character, played so physically by Michael Keaton, is such a hoot that his return would be a welcome one. Seth Grahame Smith, who wrote the lumpen Dark Shadows and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, but also the very funny book Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, has been working on a script, which will take place some 27 years after the first film. Burton has repeatedly said he’d like to explore the character again, for the right script, and Winona Ryder also says she’d be up for coming back if asked.

Jurassic ParkThe second and third movies were, y’know, fair to middling, but that doesn’t make the recent announcement of a fourth dinosaur blockbuster, set for release in 2014, any less thrilling. Because 1) The first film remains one of the most amazing big screen experiences in history, and 2) DINOSAURS. No clue on directors yet, but Steven Spielberg will only be serving as producer. This one will also be in 3D, which is, well, fine, why not. (N.B. I know this one isn’t an 80s movie, like the others, but it’s Jurassic Park so be quiet).

Counting The Days Until... Spring BreakersEx-Disney moppets doing crime in bikinis. James Franco apparently playing that dude who used to be married to Britney Spears for ten minutes. Everyone shouting “BITCHES” every few seconds for no particular reason. A ...Baby One More Time sing-along. Harmony Korine’s has everything you never knew you absolutely wanted in a movie.

If You Watch One Film This Week, Make It… Saving Private RyanSaturday, Channel 4, 10pmIt’s going to be snowing all weekend, so even attempting to leave the house would be a fool’s errand. Instead, heat up a lovely bit of soup, whack the radiators up to full blast and watch a load of soldiers having their limbs blown off in Steven Spielberg’s masterful war movie. Cosy. Also gory