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Truck Stops, Part One: Bathrooms!

Voiding in a truck stop bathroom is a great way to find out whether or not you can hold your breath for the duration of a bowel movement…

If you are going to put a woman’s phone number on the wall, remember to include the area code and if she is actually a woman.

Nothing dispensed from the condom machine in a truck stop is usable or free of STDs.

After you’ve drawn, on the bathroom wall, a stick figure woman with two circles for breasts, you really don’t need to put the word “boobies” with an arrow to the circles. If you’ve done your job, the viewer will KNOW those represent breasts.

There will never be toilet seat covers in a truck stop bathroom because they are all being used on the seating in the restaurant itself.

If the guy next to you in a truck stop bathroom asks if you want to “party”, it probably won’t involve paper hats and noisemakers.

If you use the liquid soap dispenser and it doesn’t lather up, go immediately to the nearest clinic and get a shot. What kind of shot? ALL OF THEM…

If all of the stalls are occupied, look closer: Often, one of the occupants is dead.