Sunday, 14 September 2014

...OF SAGES, ASPIRING SAGES, AND A WHIRLWIND

In a Rat Race, the eventual
winner is still a Rat. – SirRash (An aspiring Sage or something like that)

Gone are the days when you hear
the word Sage and you think of Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, Sun Tsu, Lao Tzu,
Awo, Zik, Nkrumah, Bob Marley, Baba Fela, and a few others. Today, Sages have
become a dime a dozen, and the most annoying are motivational speakers telling
everybody that cares to pay to listen that they could be anything they want to
be, thus encouraging people who should be busy taking naps for as long as
possible to become motivational speakers (continuing the endless vicious cycle)
all opening their mouths or punching their keypads terrorising us with their
shallow anecdotes, simplistic soundbites,

and one dimensional ideas. The fad
right now is to tell people that paid-employment cannot make them wealthy, that
they have to float their own start-ups, which is ironical because if these
speakers do know the recipe for wealth, why are they not all wealthy yet? I
have always been an advocate of diversity, so I will not want to advocate for
throwing all motivational speakers in jail, some of them do make sense most of
the time, I would rather look on the bright side, they could have been
politicians.

The whirlwind is eerily whirling around and
forward at a pace faster than the speed of light, but instead of feeling dizzy
and puking all over the place I was actually relaxed and I was even penning the
next post for my blog (which is now the Number One Blog in the whole world) and
mentally composing tweets to troll self-appointed Twitter warlords and narcissistic
underscore-abusing Instagram baes. Then an invisible hand gave me a transparent
bag which means I did not have to open it to see that it contains all the high-end
gadgets in the world - iPhone 10, Samsung S9, Samsung Note 7, Sony Xperia ZX,
Blackberry Z100, iPad Invisible, PS8, Xbox5, Google Brain, etc, and they are
all my custom-designed complimentary pieces from the manufacturers as a token
of their appreciation of my contribution to the design and development. Then,
the whirlwind came to a halt and I saw all the rich people in the world,
including a senile Birdman and a grotesque Tunechi (they are known as “Old
Money Much Money Gazillionaires - OMMMG), sitting at a table and the seat at the
head of the table was unoccupied, and immediately they saw me, they all stood
and paid obeisance, obviously, I am the richest man on Earth now. Then a
contraption which obviously reads mind wheezed me to the head of the table...
Actually, I could go on and on, but I think I have reached a point where I need
to stop deluding myself and admit that I have come to the end of my writing
tethers for today.