About Me

Jumat, 21 Agustus 2009

What you're about to read is something I wrote probably 4-5 months ago. Unfortunately, one of my cousins was convicted of a crime and went to jail. Well upon hearing he was actually going in I knew that it was going to be hard on the family. The night before he had to turn himself in (the end of last year) me, my bro, my girl (best friend then), and my cuzz all kicked it out. Well needless to say I ended up way gone off alcohol that night as did he. I remember waking up to a call from him. After saying hello he simply stated "Yous an Asshole you know that." LoL. Apparently I was the cause of him getting fucked up. LoL. Oh what a memory.

Unfortunately my communication with my cuzz has been damn near nothing since that morning. I somehow expected that it would slim though. I know you're probably thinking you can always write him. Well unfortunately, I knew that me being able to sit and write him would be a difficult thing to do. As many blogs, poems, and songs as I write you'd think sitting and penning a few paragraphs to my cuzz would be easy.

Well I will admit that it has been even harder than I expected. I definitely felt bad about it, yet still couldn't get through enough lines to write a letter. However, I knew he was doing okay as he called and checked in with him mom and even my brother fairly often. Well a few weeks ago I got a call from a blocked phone #. Normally I would disregard such a call, but I was expecting an important call so I answered. I was too shocked when I heard it was my cuzz calling me from jail.

When I heard the voice on the other end he sounded his normal silly, jovial, and positive self. Of course I apologized for not writing. But he definitely understood. He actually stated that his mom had been printing out our blogs here and sending them to him. That made me happy that even though I hadn't written, he was still in touch with some of what had been going on via our blog. Well after that conversation I decided to dig out what you're about to read below. Although I hadn't written him a letter I used my other talent and wrote him a song. My intentions when I wrote it some months back were to do a youtube video and actually perform this song. I never got around to doing that.

But for your reading pleasure you can envision me reciting these words below. I wrote it using the "Letter to B.I.G." beat that Jadakiss used. I know everyone was doing their own version of this song back then, so this was my version. The video is below. I would have preferred to have just the instrumental playing while you read but I was unable to find it.

So without further ado, here it is ya'll my "Letter to Britt."

Its been a few months you're probably wondering why I haven't wrote yet/ the truth is/ its no excuse/ I just can't focus/ to think of you being locked down just messes with my mental/ so I scribble/ a couple lines and just put down my pencil/ to explain how much I miss you/ was just hard to do/ easiest way was to sit and write these bars for you/ you behind bars its true/ but I still reminisce about/ the night before you turned yourself in and how we kicked it out/ I drank away the pain I didn't wanna see you go/ my younger cuzz man I used to watch and see you grow/ now you all grown up doing things like a man do/ got caught up in some shit life don't go the way we planned to/ too...just gotta handle what they hand you/ you know the court system they just tryna make examples/ outta young black youth/ the truth is hard to swallow/ too many dead or in jail no one is promised tomorrow/ my motto/ to keep it movin despite circumstances/ we all make mistakes but deserve second chances/ so when we get out/ just take a different route/ so much going on in the world I hate you missing out/ your baby girl getting bigger with every day that pass/ I know you gotta make that cash/ but I pray that's past/ future's yet to be determined they say life's what you make it/ anxious/ for your release but just gotta stay patient/ mean while just keep your head high/ aimed to the sky/ I wipe away your moms tears but I'm too gangsta to cry/ while you facing your time/ try to focus on God/ think of life as a poker game no folding the cards/ knowing its hard/ and I still can't believe myself/ you get out I got your back if you need my help/ this letter is heart felt/ I hope it reach you well/ I pray your time flies by and you find peace in jail/ when you read this mail/ know that when you get home/ celebration on/ got them bottles of patron/ ain't been long/ but it feels like forever to me/ and if you been through this storm then try to weather with me/ whether it be/ just a few months/ or a life sentence/ we all just tryna see through the dark like night vision/ in an instant/ dark nights change to bright days/ when christ came/ we all noticed how your life changed/ its quite strange/ I'm sure it made you a better man/ cuz what you going through man/ I know that I never can/ as the sands of time pass through the hour glass/ know the future ain't always defined by our past!!!

11. Favorite hobby?That i actually do....HMMM I guess scrap booking, although i do love to finish a fun upholstery project

12. Do you have A.D.D.?Is that like O.C.D.? I prefer the title of multi tasker

13. What's one trait that you hate about yourself?I will let you know tomorrow--PROCRASTINATION!

14.If you had to give up one of your senses, what would it be?I would give up being able to smell. Although taste is directly related to smell and i really like food--so maybe hear--I guess i am so thankful for all of my senses and glad this is just a rhetorical question

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.I am sitting in the jury room at superior court--1.I hate waiting2.Why do they think burping on a movie is funny3. Kinda cold and hungryI guess that is really four but i think cold and hungry go together

16.Name 4 drinks you regularly drink?Water, Pepsi(otherwise known as the nectar of the gods) Diet Coke with Lime--Diet cherry limeade from Sonic

17. Current worry right now?How my youngest is going to like and adjust to his new teacher

18. Current hate right now?dirty house/laundry/mopping floors but i hate these things all the time

19.Favorite season?--I love fall--I love the smell of the leaves and the wonderful colors that they trees turn. I miss it alot since we don't actually have fall in AZ

20. How did you bring in the New Years?With friends and their kids--pigging out,playing games and doing a puzzles and the guys play games

21. Like to go?Is this an opened ended question--like make up your own ending or is like take the time to "GO"--often i find i am to busy to stop and take the time to "GO"--I wish i could have others "go" for me

22.Nail polish?Only on my toes--love the dark blue/reds in the winter, pinks in the spring and an orange red in the fall

23. Do you own your own slippers?Yes.I used to love those with the funny animals and such--now i just like warm and comfy ones that i can drive in if needed.

24. What color shirt are you wearing?A green one to match my eyes--after all the years of my mom trying to convince me to wear green it finally worked

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?NO--I am a cotton girl all the way--I just gave away my satin sheets and they were practically brand new--don't like the slip sliding feeling or the snaggy feeling when your heels are rough

26. Can you whistle?Yes,only in...but not very effectively.

27. Favorite color?I love it all in various shades--color makes me happy

28. Would you be a pirate?ARGHHHH yes matey---but i think my integrity would be and issue to the whole robbing and pillaging thing---

29. What songs do you sing in the shower?Not a big shower singer--but get me in the car and watch out!

30. If you could pick your name what would it have been?hmmmm--this is a deep question--I think my name fits me--leigh ann, but not just leigh

31.Bed sheets as a kid--I had holly hobby and then some pretty yellow with tiny little multicolored buds--still like those sheets (yes i still have one)

32. What's in your pocket right now?a coupon to Lowes--coins and beads. What can I say? I live a random life

33. Last thing that made you laugh?watching my husband play the WII

34. Worst injury you've ever had?When i rubbed off all the skin on my shins knee boarding right before graduation

35. Do you love where you live?Although it is hot in the summer you don't have to shovel sunshine and if you want the snow you only have to drive a few hours to find it. I do miss the trees from back east but have learned to appreciate the beauty that is found in the desert

36. How many TV's do you have in your house?I think six or so

37. Who is your loudest friend?HMMMMM--I think Sheli but actually she is my sis-in-law. I think i am probably louder than her at times though

38. How many pets do you have?one really spoiled dog

39. Does someone have a crush on you?It is my anniversary--so i hope my husband

40. What is your favorite book?I go between the mindless dribble and murder mystery. I also love a good coffee table book and love History books

41. What is your favorite candy?Heath Bar or Peanut M&M's--makes me feel like i am making a healthy choice since nuts are good for you

42. Favorite Sports Team?the ones my children are on--although i do have teams i prefer to drive and watch over others--just a perk of my job

43. What were you doing 12 AM last night?Sleeping--what can i say? I am getting old

44. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?"Crap! I have to get up and go to work...again"

45. Worst habit?Cursing and procrastination, but i try not to make that a habit

46. Do you play an instrument?Does the radio count? I can play the first two lines of "My country tis of thee" on the piano--maybe one day i will figure it out

47. How long does it take you to get to work?About 7 minutes or less--depends if i cut through the parking lot when i don't get a left turn arrow in the morning

48. Plans for the weekend?work (story of my life) Party with the friends for New Years--always tons to eat and lots of laughs and a good time--bummer it only happens once a year

49. If you could eat anything in the world right this second what would it be?Panna Cotta! Seriously love that stuff. Just hook up an IV with that in it and i will die a happy person

50. Do you like the person who sent this to you?Since there are very few people that i dislike the odds are YES--only wish i could remember who actually sent it to me