Paranormal Activity for Pansies and Parents without Girls

A movie review… sort of and an open letter to the makers of Paranormal Activity-Five.

Seriously??

Perhaps you Paranormal movie making people could benefit from a field trip to my home.

No charge.

My two girls share the same menstrual cycle… and quite frankly, the catching-the-bus-scene in my home on any given Monday morning rivals the hell outta the infamous puke scene from the Exorcist.

Furthermore…

Never ever fuck with the dog. That just pisses me off.

*Not a spoiler. I’m pretty sure the dog didn’t die.

Who could tell. I was bored and only like half paying attention.

I mean…

Did you guys even try??

My favorite part was definitely the previews of Channing Tatum in the new Jump Street movie. That can’t suck because he’s in it, so at the very least you get 90 minutes of feel good chemicals flowing warmly through your grey matter and other places.