For one off events, yes absolutely I wake them. I am a very punctual person and think it's the height of rudeness to be late. Obviously emergencies happen, but a sleeping child doesn't qualify as an emergency in my eyes. They may be cranky later but I find my kids cope just fine with less sleep, I can deal well with crankiness most of the time.

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I wake mine for things like kindy drop off/pick up, appointments and important one-off ceremonies such as weddings/christenings etc. I wouldn't usually wake them for a lunch (even if its a birthday), I would *try* to work it so they would have napped and woken before we're due to leave though but sometimes it's not possible.

I guess how little they are at the time depends on it all too. If I had a 6mo then their sleep would come first, then socialising, otherwise they're overtired and cranky anyway.....and that means a crap time for everyone!

If it is a special occasion (Christmas, party etc) I will plan my boys nap around it. For example if bub sleeps from 1-3 and lunch is 1:30 I will arrive early 12:30 and put bub down for a nap in the porta cot at 1. Or if I am meeting people for a birthday party at the park at 2:00 I will arrive at the park at 12:30 and go for a big walk in the pram, so bub would hopefully get at least an hour and a half. If its an informal lunch with family I would probably still plan ahead like that.

I don't have much patience for people who commit to a time and then arrive an hour late because of lack of planning. If they say from the get go I won't be able to make it on time then that's OK. Or if something unexpected came up (sick child) that's totally fine. Or even if its a really young bub I would understand.

I can see where your BIL is coming from. People put a lot of effort into planning Christmas lunch. A bit like a wedding they want it to go off like a hitch. Eating before key guests arrive is not cool. Either is turning up extra late. With my family though it probably wouldn't be an issue as we are never on time with Christmas lunch...

Agree.

Worst is when people text you to cancel or say they will be late 5-10 mins before you are meant to meet. And they know it takes you 20 mins to get there so obviously you have already left. So rude!

If I was your BIL I'd be annoyed too.
I try as much as I can to work around sleep times- my kids are shocking on too little sleep, it mucks up their night sleep and makes them generally grumpy. They also only sleep well in their own beds. But if I've agreed to a time in advance I do what I can to make it, including wake the baby. If I have to wake the baby that inconveniences me, if I delay going somewhere to let her sleep that's just transferring the inconvenience elsewhere. Doesn't really seem fair.

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It depends really. I don't think being half an hour late is such a big deal, particularly seeing as you let them know - it's not like you just didn't turn up until later without notice.

Waking my first wouldn't have bothered me because he would have kept sleeping in the car and possibly once we arrived. Waking my second wouldn't have inconvenienced me at all, but it would have made the lunch pure hell for everyone else. How is it rude to shelter everyone else from a feral, cranky baby who won't stop screaming?

Perhaps your BIL was the one in need of a day sleep? Might have avoided the tantrum..

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Absolutely wake them, if I agree to be somewhere at a specific time regardless of what we are doing we will be there.

We would just put DD in the car and hope she went back to sleep.

Christmas lunch to me is an important family event and I think it's very rude to be late unless absolutely unavoidable (traffic, flat tire ect) and I think it is rude to ask people to start without you as it is a important occasion

I would have been peeved as your BIL too to be honest. Xmas lunch is generally a lot of planning/buying/cooking etc. It's a once a year event, surely babies naps can be planned around it.

I try not to wake my boys in general, as that's when they would end up a little cranky, which no one wants! But I simply put them down earlier if need be, or request the time of a catch up to suit around their sleeps (if close friends or family).

Christmas Day lunch? With family that someone has presumably spent a lot of time planning amd preparing? I know how much work goes into a Christmas Day breakfast/lunch/dinner.
Yes, I would plan around it so we arrived on time

Christmas Day lunch? With family that someone has presumably spent a lot of time planning amd preparing? I know how much work goes into a Christmas Day breakfast/lunch/dinner.
Yes, I would plan around it so we arrived on time

What if waking your child meant that, whilst you arrived on time, you couldn't eat with everyone any way because bub was so upset and vocal, they had to be taken out of the room so as to not disturb everyone else?

Surely arriving later and having everyone else eat on time is preferable?

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