Justin Bieber and Paris Hilton nearly hooked up (???)

Sometimes weird things happen in life and we end up blindsided by occurrences which we just never saw coming. One of those things is the possibility that Justin Bieber and Paris Hilton slept together. In what universe could this have been allowed to happen? Has the world gone too far? So many questions come to mind (the main one being “???????????????”), but luckily, we don’t really need any answers here because things stopped short of real romance between the pair.

Paris and Justin partied in Cannes Sunday night at Gotha Nightclub. There are reports that the 2 got cozy … with the 33-year-old climbing into Justin’s 20-year-old lap … then leaving for his house.

But here’s the deal. We’re told 50 people went back to Justin’s house — Paris was never alone with him. And something else we were told … she said the party was lame and couldn’t stand the fact that Justin was playing his own songs … so she left after half an hour.

LOL, I love that this kid thinks his music is good enough to rock for women (or at all). Talk about delusional. Also, I love that Paris Hilton has standards all of a sudden. She’s just gone about ten levels up in my books because of it. Seems like she really missed out, considering that Justin clearly knows how to treat women right.

You took the herp right outta my mouth! Wait, that didn’t come out right… : / Haaaaa, oh herpes Hollywood! ;) Ya know, these 2 are gunna bone down eventually ’cause they drrty like that. Good riddance to ‘em both.