Thoughts from Nicole McDermott

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Complaining

I went through a period a few months ago where I felt like everyone around me was complaining all the time. It seemed like everything was an issue. It seemed like everything needed attention, or a comment. But, really, not everything requires something of us.

Most things, they can simply exist. Things don’t have to be issues if we don’t make them issues. It really can be as simple as that.

I get that when things are challenging or stressful, sometimes a small thing feels like a big thing because it’s one more thing. But, again, that’s only if we make it that way.

We can do hard things.

We can problem solve.

We can triumph even in stress.

We can make another plan when the first one isn’t going our way – or when circumstances get in our way of being successful.

We can be uncomfortable for a short time, and we can persevere.

We don’t have to see everything through a negative lens.

The thing I started to notice about complaints is that often very little solution is offered. The complaints I’ve heard lately are more like announcements: announcements of negative energy that filter to everyone and everything in the room. It’s like when suddenly you can see dust particles everywhere if something has been disturbed; these complaints, they are like that. You can’t see them, but you can feel them. And they don’t feel good. With complaints, what’s been disturbed is the energy, the atmosphere, the space – and me!

So, if you don’t have a solution, and you don’t want to add more to your responsibilities by seeking one out, please consider keeping quiet. Or, how about making other sort of announcements? I think we can all use more positive energy. I love the people who surround me with announcements of good news and good feelings. It’s so valuable. And uplifting. As Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor said, “Please take responsibility for the energy you bring into this space.”

Any space. All spaces. Please.

There is a reason why that old expression, “If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all,” still exists.