My journey to become an atheist was a very long one. I had my doubts from back when I was around 10 years old (I'm 25 now). I remember back when I was a kid I was terrified about going to Hell. I would ask myself often if I really believed in Jesus and I tried to convince myself I did.

I grew up in a Christian family and was surrounded by Christians my whole life. I went to a Lutheran school and went to church there everyday as well as another church outside of school every Sunday. Christianity was a big part of my life back then.

I was always a skeptical person and tried to use logical reasoning. I guess because of Christianity being such a big part of my life I never questioned it until I got older. I was always scared though.

As I got older I slowly started to realize how absurd Christianity is. This is where the brainwashing comes into play. Even though I knew how stupid some things were, I ignored it thinking that there was some bigger purpose.

The big turning point for me was a couple years ago. I was unemployed and had a lot of free time. I would think a lot about myself and my future as well as religion in general. So I started to do some research and what I found was incredible. Something that would change my life forever.

First thing I did was I researched the history of Christianity. Wow! Christianity borrowed things from other religions. Even the cross is a pagan symbol coming from the Wheel of the Zodiac. Imagine that, all those people who wear crosses and don't even know where it came from.

Next I went for the Bible itself. I really started to study it and what I found was sickening. Entire cities being destroyed, kids being murdered, the owning and beating of slaves, etc. As well as things that are just plain silly such as men who lived to be hundreds of years old. The list goes on and on.

There is so much suffering, pain and fear in the Bible that I couldn't believe it. It was like a smack in the face for me to wake up. Then and there I decided I wasn't going to be a part of such a thing. I'm a good natured, peace loving person and I wouldn't harm a fly. This went against
everything I am.

I then started to think about all the wars that religion has caused over the years. All the advances in technology that were halted due to religion. We as a people are limiting ourselves because of this. I just couldn't go on knowing that I in some way was a part of it.

When I finally decided not to be religious anymore a strange thing happened, I wasn't scared anymore. I also found a new appreciation for life. I realized I couldn't rely on some fairy tale to save me from whatever was happening. I needed to do things on my own and create my own purpose in life. I also never felt so free.

So here I am now. I'm no longer worrying about going to Hell. I don't care about what the "Christian" thing to do is. I just do whatever I think is right and listen to my heart. I'm just...happy.

I would like to leave you with a thought that really struck me as I was researching. It's from a documentary that, unfortunately, I can't remember the name.

Let's say that Christianity was true and you end up in Hell. Wouldn't you wished you had believed? No, because Heaven wouldn't be much better knowing that there are millions of people in Hell suffering horribly and there was nothing you could do about it.

The Bible is considered to be the Good Book, and the Gospel Truth. We swear an oath in court with one hand on a Bible, and have as our motto, "In God We Trust". God is agreed to be the God of the Bible, particularly the New Testament. Many Americans also believe the Bible is to be taken literally, even though a story of human sacrifice linked with another story about the first human couple seems mythological rather than historical.

Christianity is founded upon these two stories from the Old Testament and the New, forming a religion unlike any other. Though human sacrifice to appease the Gods was a common basis for most ancient religions, the story of Adam and Eve adds a new twist:

Genesis Chapter 2:

"And the Lord God commanded the man, "You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."

Chapter 3:4:

"You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. 5 "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."

22 And the Lord God said, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil..."

In Romans 5:12, the doctrine of "sin" is introduced:

12 "Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned— "

Yet, "sin" is not mentioned until Cain's wrongdoing in Genesis 4:7! Before eating the fruit, the first couple were naive and obedient just as children before they begin to mature. They were incapable of moral responsibility. So, their "sin" has nothing to do with morals or personal responsibility. It was invented in order to ground the human-god sacrifice of Jesus, because without sin, there can be no salvation.

The sacrifice of Jesus restores us to what we were before the Fall. God desires us to be sexless, naive, immature, dependent, obedient children. We will be "sinless" and incapable of moral responsibility. Heaven is the New Eden where human nature is sacrificed to appease God.

By viewing human nature as sinful and ungodly, the way is made for the punishment hell provides. However, the story of the Fall wasn't about that. The couple didn't die when they ate the fruit, but became morally conscious and aware of their moral responsibilities. They had to learn to make moral decisions on their own. God told them a half truth because He couldn't tolerate human maturity.

If we see Genesis as myth, it makes perfect sense. The story is an allegory about our dependence upon our parents, and the difficulties we must face to become mature adults. Rather than being the solution to life's challenges, the Plan of Salvation exacerbates them. God's intention to save the world becomes an utter failure when we consider that 99% of all life that ever existed is condemned and will be destroyed.

The foundation of a mature morality begins with empathy, compassion, and justice. It will also include the goal of coexistence. Salvation begins with a cynical view of human nature and divides humanity. We are either saved or unsaved, bound for hell or heaven. Without sin, there can be no hell. Without hell, there can be no heaven. Neither can there be anything to be saved from. Finally, without Salvation, there is no need for a Savior.

A literal interpretation of the Fall and Jesus' Sacrifice is like a house built on sand:

Matthew 7:27: "The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash."

Through history, the prevailing consensus on what and who God despises has drifted on the cultural currents. A seemingly continuous anchor point for Christians has been that God hates sin, although whether he hates the sinner too is contested.

Even more contested is which sins he hates. Does God really hate shellfish consumption and blend fabrics and beard trimming as much as he hates anal sex, for example? The book of Leviticus seems to say so. But most modern Christians and Jews simply can’t bring themselves to care about these things, and so they find it almost impossible to believe at a gut level, that God does. A similar laissez faire attitude can be seen among young people toward homosexuality. Having been raised on Modern Family and Little Miss Sunshine and Glee; having encountered openly gay relatives and friends from childhood on, they simply can’t find it in themselves to think that God cares terribly much who we love.

Half a century ago, a social psychologist named Fritz Heider made a series of observations that he distilled into what he called “balance theory.” His theory is useful in thinking about why our images of God change. Heider found that positive and negative feelings in relationships need to be balanced to be stable. For example, if I love my gay brother (positive), and I worship the biblical God (positive), but the Bible says gays are an abomination (negative), then my loyalties are in conflict and so unstable. In this case, I might start feeling more negative about my brother, or I might start feeling more negative about the Bible. Either would help me resolve my conflict and create balance. Over the years, other scholars have refined Heider’s theory, but the general ideas of balance and stability persist.

Think about social balance as it relates to me and a god. This is a relationship in which one party (the god) either exists exclusively in my mind or is highly ambiguous, which means I have a great deal of latitude in what I imagine his attitudes to be. In a human-to-human social relationship, I can’t resolve conflict simply by adjusting another person’s attitude, at least not without putting out some good arguments and evidence. But in the human-to-god equation, I can. And, in fact, adjusting a god’s attitudes to fit mine may be quite a bit easier than the reverse.

At the heart of humanity is a sometimes sweet, sometimes not-so-sweet narcissism that makes it almost impossible for us to get outside ourselves. This narcissism is visible in a small child who can feel another person’s distress but doesn’t know quite how to respond and so offers the comfort she herself would want. A two-year-old may offer her crying mother a stuffed animal or a soggy cookie. But even adults make a similar well intentioned error. What makes you feel really loved by a partner? For some people the answer is sex. For some it is gifts. For some it is being told, “I love you.” For some it is having a task or burden taken off of their shoulders. To communicate love effectively, one has to know what makes a specific recipient feel loved. But spouses often make the mistake of offering whatever they most want to receive. When a partner is feeling distant or sad, they ramp up efforts to givewhat they themselves would want—and then are disappointed in the reaction.

Have you ever noticed how utterly indifferent God is to how humans treat fish?What I’m trying to illustrate is that by default we use ourselves as the measure of the world. The Golden Rule acknowledges this: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” In other words, start with what you know—yourself—and imagine that others want the same (and you’re likely to treat them fairly well). By contrast, the Platinum Rule, “Do unto others as they would have you do unto them,” can bring us a mental screeching halt, because it asks us to step outside ourselves. That’s tough. In the XTC song, “Garden of Earthly Delights,” the refrain, “don’t hurt nobody” is repeated –and then, just once, it is followed by “ ‘less of course they ask you.” The listener is startled and maybe laughs. Most of us don’t want to get hurt, even for titillation, and so we don’t expect the exception.

In a similar vein, we tend to assume that God shares our perspective and priorities. Have you ever noticed how utterly indifferent God is to how humans treat fish? Jesus himself magically multiplied fish so they could be hoisted in nets and subjected to slow suffocation. Fish brains are very unlike ours, and the more alien a mind is, the less we are able to empathize. This may be why we concern ourselves less with the treatment of octopus than chimpanzees, even though scientists tell us that octopus are some of the most intelligent creatures on the planet. Unless we can somehow resonate with an animal’s experience, meaning feel it, at least at a tentative hypothetical level, it falls outside our moral sphere—and God’s priorities.

Our ability to empathize with other humans, though one of our great gifts, has similar limits based on whether they are familiar or alien to us. We care about their happiness and suffering in proportion to several factors such as attachment, proximity and similarity. In other words we care about people more if we spend time with them and they are like us—same country, same religion, same race, same gender, more shared DNA . . . . When other people get hurt, it hurts us less if they are more alien. Our moral outrage at a child being “collateral damage” isn’t the same if they live in Iraq as it would be if the bombs fell in our neighborhood.

We relate only distantly to most people on this planet. And even though believers insist that “Jesus love the little children of the world”—equally-- their behavior in the practice of Christian living suggest otherwise. Consider: Thoughtful people sometimes balk at football prayers, the idea that God will favor one team over another. But who balks at grace before dinner? Almost no-one. And yet, those who believe God loves the children of the world equally should. If you had two children, one who had goldfish crackers and juice and cheese sticks and peaches for lunch and then an after school snack; and one who hadn’t eaten since yesterday—and then only a thin gruel—which would you feed meat and potatoes tonight? In a less self-centric world, deities wouldn’t be thanked for directing the food to American dinner tables; they would be scolded or politely declined.

“Jesus loves the little children.” “His eye is on the sparrow.” “Ask and ye shall receive.” – these soothing verbal mantras work their magic because what is really at stake for each individual believer is a vortex of well-being that centers on him or her, thinning as it reaches beyond family, friends, countrymen and co-religionists to a hazy netherland of alien cultures and creatures. Unfortunately, those of us who lack person-gods have little cause to be smug. The vortex is the same; we merely lack the validation that comes from a deity sharing our personal priorities. Only a mindful commitment to compassionate living can carry us through life in a manner that draws the world into the self-- whether or not the self includes some concept of God.

Seven years ago I was thirteen years old and I remember going to my church to pick up a big box of candy bars from my youth leader.She said to try to sell as many as you can around your neighborhood or to whoever you can.She said we should sell them for a dollar each.That didn't seem to hopeful if I was going to get to Mexico in four months. I thought, "What the heck am I going to do? Stand on every street corner in the summer heat and beg people to eat chocolate till I have hundreds of dollars?" But I knew that was about the biggest fundraiser the church could afford so I figured I better do what I'm supposed to do and go on a mission trip. I sold like twenty. My family bought half of them to help out, and I had the chocolate sitting in a box in my house once again haha. But when the trip got close my dad had to give me 200 extra dollars or I wouldn't have gone anywhere. My dad pretty much had to bail me out even though money was slow with his own business. I hated that.

I continued to try to ''serve'' God for a few more years after that.It was a constant battle of getting my mind to shut up. All I really wanted to know was why God seemed a million miles alway and I was basically doing charity work on my own. But I knew thats not a question you ask God or the church so I tried to turn off my mind.I went to a Christian school, my parents had most of their social life at church and were pretty sincere in their faith, and my best friend was the daughter of a preacher and I'd been there since I was six. Naturally I stopped questioning my faith because I didn't want to risk my entire social life. Plus, the fear of hell was there. And, as anyone who's been in that situation of being indoctrinated would know, you do whatever the hell you have to do to avoid hell!

So life carried on... I went around in one big circle and was on my way to Mexico again. But this time I was eighteen and doing a car wash to raise money. I stood outside this store and held signs for it, watching car after car pull in and people getting out to buy food, not get a car washed. I looked over at another boy who was holding signs by the door and telling bad jokes to get people's attention. They just looked confused. I had to laugh cause I knew this was getting pathetic. We barely made it to the trip, and my dad bailed me out once again. This time he had to give 800 dollars. It was hard (he still had his own business to run), but as a Christian he felt he had to do it for God's word to be spread. I still didn't want to question God, but I was pretty angry about my dad going through that again.

On the trip something in me started to snap. We had a worship time every morning and they said we should enjoy time with "the creator of the universe." At that point it was pretty much impossible not to think, "Do they mean to tell me that the God of the entire universe sent me on this trip and he is so 'powerful' that he has no better plan to save the world then to raise money at some stupid car wash? Or to sell candy for a dollar like last time?" Sadly I was stuck in Mexico for five more days after that doing plays about Adam and Eve. I was the tree. Exciting, huh? But as I did the lame play I started to notice that all we could give these kids was lunch. These kids needed a lot more then lunch and God didn't bring much money with his "car wash plan."

It took me about another year after that to totally leave my faith.It had been such a huge part of all my life after all. Other things pushed me away too, like reading the whole Old Testament (yikes!). And, finally meeting people who were not believers that pretty much encouraged me to get the hell out of there. But God's total inactivity on the mission trip really sealed it for me. If thats not a sign of his absence in the Christian world I don't know what is. So that's my story of Christianity being a dead end. I agnostic now and I don't have all the answers but I would say it beats running around in endless circles trying to serve a God who clearly isn't there.

While browsing a christian forum to pick up possible opposing arguments to the pro gay marriage stance that I take, I saw a question asking something along the lines of: "Why is gay marriage unnatural?" The response from one of the priests on the website was frightening:

We don’t have individual, subjective natural laws. Natural law is objective and applies to all people. Our awareness of it derives from right reason and not from feelings. There are some people who choose to take pleasure in incest. This doesn’t mean that such activity comes from the natural law. It’s quite the opposite. The taboo of incest comes from natural law. Because some people feel an attraction doesn’t make it natural. The vast majority of humans are repulsed by incest because it threatens the integrity of the family which is the central cell of human social life. The vast majority of humans are repulsed by same sex attraction and so called same sex marriage for the same reason. Most people with same sex attraction are actually repulsed by it as well—despite the attraction they feel for members of their same sex.

I realize that these statements can enrage many people because they don’t want them to be true. But this doesn’t make them untrue. It is only when we recognize the hunger for meaning lying at the core of our being that we open ourselves to the Creator and recognize that we are not enough for ourselves and that ultimately we cannot be happy by following only that which gives immediate pleasure.

How dare he compare same-sex marriage to incest. Two men or two women that are attracted to one another is a completely different thing from, say, a father and a daughter.

To claim that the vast majority of humans are repulsed by same sex attraction is preposterous. This is a projection of his own homophobia upon the rest of the world, and is utterly false.

To go further and say that most people with same sex attraction are repulsed by it as well is a ridiculous assumption. Just because he finds same sex attraction repulsive does not give him the right to say that the people who actually feel these attractions share his views.

I will admit that some people that have homosexual tendencies are, as a result, homophobic, but I believe that this is a result of church teachings that homosexuals are evil and go to hell.

"I realize that these statements can enrage many people."

Well that goes without saying. How can you expect to preach such an intolerant and ignorant doctrine and expect people who are not brainwashed by your fear tactics to believe it as true?

I am so frustrated and tired with the intolerance and ignorance plaguing our world. Hopefully one day we can look back, as with interracial marriage, and ask ourselves, how was that ever not legal?

I've always been an outcast in my church, for a number of reasons, I was "saved" at age 8, I was very intellectual, which my basic knowledge and curiosity, and limited experience with science came to this conclusion of there is a "God" which explains why "God" made the sky and water blue, and many other things an imaginative mind like mine could ponder. The two most important things in my life that made me an outcast of the church was that 1) I was a skeptic and 2) my mother was a single parent.

My mother, a very liberal Southern Baptist among Southern Baptists, told me that I had a "sky daddy" which brought up more issues with my friends in elementary school. For example a friend whom I'll call Joe:

Joe: Well do you have a daddy?

Me: Yes and no?

Joe: What do you mean?

Me: (Thinking) mmm..

Joe: Well?

Me: *Starts walking back and forth then stops* Yes I do!

Joe: What's his name

Me: God!

Joe: Huh?

This went on until 4th grade when religion started to seep into the rest of class I went into school with, by this time I started saying things like, "Yes, but he passed away" and "Well, he divorced my mom" the latter no one was really buying since my mom was a volunteer at the school. What really broke my heart was the fact that even though the Church members parents where being nice to me and helping my mom out with items like food, and clothing for me, they were talking behind her back and putting her down. Sometimes the older members of the church told her upfront "we're not doing this for you but your kid", that irritated me even more. These comments made me resentful to some of the members of the church, whom some have passed away and some I refuse to speak to even now.

My skepticism has been with me since I was 5, I've done my best to keep it from my mom, but it seeps out when I get stressed, or when I'm worried about a payment, at this same time my mother got married, to a very self-centered "christian" at the same time he was an idiot, and controlling, as I was required to listen nothing to "christian music" on Sundays, must attend both services, and be involved in the high school youth group. Also I was in high school which was no help in my life there. These factors help push me toward my "atheism" (lack of a better term).

In my mother's church, just like high school, there were "cliques", most large churches has them, it runs church politics, if you can fit in with the one's closes to either the head deacon or the pastor, you can practically get away with "murder". My high school youth group, had this problem, well, to a point, the older grades and the younger grades had "cliques", I was alone, the "outcast". Unless it was a bible trivia game, I rocked at those.

While I was blind to see this, I wanted to do so much in the church, I help start classes, start an instrumental music ministry with the music pastor (who had a master's in music) and helped to make a teen choir. Something was bugging me, something just didn't felt right.

On my final year in the youth group, and the point where my mother's church drops the ball on all it's college age students, I made a new friend, another "outcast", this friend of mine was resentful to "God" and intellectually better than me, which felt a relief to me, since he also rocked at bible trivia. One Sunday as we talked before Sunday school, I explained to him, I was a skeptic, which shocked him. He asked me how I did so much in the church and still not fully believed? I explained to him, I was just "phoning it in". Not really caring about it, while this talk was going on, he explained to me about his resentment towards "God" and then his knowledge of the old testament. My skepticism felt relieved, I felt better. I decided that I didn't believe in "god" or anything religious.

Fast forward to college, I've officially left the church, I feel better, like I belong, no longer an "outcast". My mother isn't happy with my decision but she's ok with it as long as I visit her church.

I know this story doesn't seem to fit in and it seems all over the place, but as with life,I realized that it completed my de-conversion.

I was raised in an Irish Catholic home. I don't recall having much belief in any of it. I got in trouble once for saying Mass to my stuffed animals. My parents wouldn't say it but it was because GIRLS CAN'T BE PRIESTS. Church was boring and the stories were the same thing. I just didn't "get" it. Catholic school was good only for making me smarter than the public school kids.

When I was a teenager, I told my parents the Bible didn't make any sense and they flipped out on me. It was so strange to see normally rational people flip out like that. So I lied and said I didn't understand some of the names and terms like Nebuchadnezzar. They totally calmed down after that.

My Catholic school shut down because it was in a small town and no one had money for tuition. My parents sent me to catechism classes, which devolved into nonsense, especially when it was time for sex ed. I'll never forget when the teacher wrote "Sex, You, and Reality." It was a lot of dumbness about platonic love and waiting until marriage. None of it was realistic.

After I left for college, I went to school a few times because I felt like I had to.

Then my mom got sick with cancer. She was going to die. I sat with her for four months. Every few days the priest would show up to give her Rites for the Sick. My family had never gotten over Vatican II, so I knew they just watered down the name from Extreme Unction. My grandfather asked me all the time if she'd gotten her last rights. He's a total ahole.

She seemed to get a lot of comfort out of it, but I sure didn't. In fact, it only made me angry. She told me she wanted to be cremated, but later dad convinced her to be buried (remember the Vatican II BS). That made me really angry. I know that they were a married couple making a decision together, but knowing that my father had a real fear that my mom would go to hell just for being cremated freaked me out. Normally he's rational and smart. Besides, no god would put my mom in hell for putting up with all our sh*t over the years.

She was in fact buried in a Catholic cemetery dedicated to the souls of aborted fetuses. They just had to work their politics in through my grief.

That was my first step to my breakup with the church.

Later I moved to Portland, home of the Archdiocese of Portland. I started hearing about men who had been molested by priests. At first I didn't believe it, because I reflexively sided with the church. This is absurd because I'm a rape victim myself and I know how painful it is when people blame the victim.

I still went to church sometimes, but only because I wanted to get married in the cathedral like my parents. Parish members get a steep discount.

But then the stories were too many to discount. I started to doubt.

Then the archdiocese severed my ties to church or religion by declaring bankruptcy.

That was it. Now, I was able to side with the victims. The church was a behemoth that wasn't interested in protecting children once they were out of the womb and safe from the threat of abortion. They would rather plead poverty than provide money for the people they harmed to get help.

It's only gotten worse over the years. The church's stand on women, gays, condoms and every other backward idea has just reaffirmed that there is really no god, just a patriarchy that uses the threat of god to keep people in line.

Well, in a way, I felt I was kind of lucky in that I had a headstart. In 1960, I was being indoctrinated to do something called a First Communion. I had no idea what that meant, due to the fact that as a 7 year old, of course, I had the attention span of a gnat.

I did as I was told and marched up, prayer hands in position, and want to get a cookie the man in the pretty, golden dress was giving everybody.

Walking back to my seat, I felt immediately nauseous, and this being a poor Catholic church in a small Mexican American community, had an outhouse for it's parishioners to use.

I immediately threw it all up, all the while this large butch nun who had chased after me, beating me across the back and telling me that because "you had rejected the body of christ, you are forever damned, and will burn in Hell forever!!", a premise that, to this TV fed 7 year old, was the ONLY part of their story I thought I found interesting and absolutely THRILLING!

I went home that day and told my mom that I did not believe a word of this and did not want to go to church. While she and the rest of the family attended church regularly, she never pushed me to attend. This freed me up to spend my formative years and most of my life, educating myself to the many avenues of the faith industry, and ultimately realizing that I simply could never believe such nonsense. I suspect that I was also born without the FAITH gene.

I grew up innately believing that every time I did something, I then got to see the results or effects of my actions.
It was something I did, and I was seeing the results.

It never occured to me of crediting a god or some lame, culturally popular little saviour for something I clearly did. Although my family was religious, on this topic, I had made it clear very early on that I did not buy a single word of it. I was not going to play along.

Seeing the effect that christianity, in particular the catholic version I was mentally molested with as an adolescent, had in dumbening down the stupid and superstitious of those in my immediate community, I got the hell away from it all by educating myself far away from my imposed upon reality. From the age of nine years old, I spent most all of my free time at the neighborhood library, reading and listening to anything I could get my hands on, challenging, educating myself to understand topics that appealed to me, immediately eschewing the popular, fearing I would be 'like everyone else', while living in this big, strange and wonderful world. In my teens, I was scoring free tickets to any performances I could find, anything from John Cage music to ballet, poetry reading to stage productions, opera to classical performances, while I should have been playing sports,getting in fights and finding friendships among my (ugh) peer groups.

All the while, being so obviously not like the others, and gay to boot, I heard the usual deathwishes that christians would curse me with for not being a believer. Or even caring about their faith.

With every pronouncement of my going to hell, it only reminded me of just how stupid the religious were. And while I am sure that my child self had a more visceral response to this christian hatred than I can hardly muster up these days, this only confirmed to me that all I needed to do was grow up and get far away from these ignorant people. Oddly, this taught me patience.

I purposely and consciously chose the road less traveled. And then I ran like HELL.

Niccolo Machiavelli (who actually devoted much of his life and work to free republics, which leads some to think "The Prince" was a sort of satire) pointed out the sad truth that people will more readily follow someone they fear than someone they love. He goes on to say "I conclude that since men love as they themselves determine but fear as their ruler determines, a wise prince must rely upon what he and not others can control." It breaks down like this: you are less likely to revolt against someone you are afraid of then you are to revolt against someone you love. Love can be a fickle thing, if the ruler does something you do not like you may decide you do not love them anymore. This is what Machiavelli means when he says "men love as they themselves determine."

Religion, especially Christianity, has found a way to harness and balance both of these powerful emotions to get people into a lasting submission. Machiavelli says a ruler should invoke both feared and loved for a reason. The more people fear you, the more they want to avoid your disapproval. The only flaw with being feared is that sometimes the fear turns to hate. Machiavelli says with good reason to avoid being hated. That's where love comes in. The more people love you, the more atrocities they will forgive. They will also be good servants, going above and beyond what you ask of them. Common methods of evangelism give people a reason both to fear and love god.

The common way that many evangelists open is by convincing you that you are not a good person or at least that you can't be one on your own. (Not even "The Prince" sunk that low) They usually use a mix of the ten commandments and the sermon on the mount to peg you as a liar, adulterer, a blasphemer, and more. Then they give the person a reason to fear god by saying something along the lines of "If you were to walk out into the street over there and get hit by a car and you were standing in front of the judgment seat of god, what would you have to say for yourself?" They don't even have to mention hell because it's already so engrained into our culture. By doing these two things the evangelist has established that 1) you are nothing without god and 2) you better do something quick because you could die in an instant and be sent to hell. You know, maybe the term Machiavellian should be revised; I think Niccolo was a good guy. Why not rename the word for manipulative, two-facedness something like Evangelian or Christian.

Fear? Check. Now for the love. The guy that wants you to believe you need him to not be worthless and deserving of the eternal torture pit he made to scare people into submission gives you a chance to be good. "He wants to help you and have a personal relationship with you! You are saved!" If the evangelist was successful in making the person feel worthless and afraid, then this is very good news to them and they are likely to become a Christian. What worthless person doesn't want to feel that someone loves them unconditionally and wants to make them worth something?

Now that the Xian loves and fears god, they will forgive atrocities like the great flood, genocide, child sacrifice, bigotry, and the like. Even more, they will try and defend these actions as just. They will also believe that they need to force others into the submission because they feel that it is a good thing and they want to share it. Also the big guy tells them to.

Of course the "loving relationship" is based on a lie. No healthy relationship involves one feeling worthless if it were not for another. Can you imagine a husband trying to teach the same lesson to his wife? He would say something along the lines of, "Without me you have no money, no marketable skills, and no friends. You need me, but the good news is I love you and will always provide for you. You don't have to worry!" We would call this man a manipulative bastard, why is it different with god? If he truly loved her he would want her to feel that she has value independently and he would want her to choose him willingly, not because of fear and feelings of self doubt.

No healthy relationship involves one feeling worthless if it were not for another. Can you imagine a husband trying to teach the same lesson to his wife? He would say something along the lines of, "Without me you have no money, no marketable skills, and no friends. You need me, but the good news is I love you and will always provide for you. You don't have to worry!" I must make a point here to acknowledge that some insecure people have probably found some help in religion. If they already felt worthless the thought of a loving god was probably comforting and helpful in overcoming their insecurity. This combined with a new community of friendly people that welcome the person can make life a lot better. The problem with this "solution" is that it is sort of like a drug. Rather than solving the core of one's problems, one is likely to just dive deeper into their religion. They are just as dependent as a crack head and many of them would proudly admit that. Evangelists are really just unknowing drug dealers.

Should we support a religion ran by a fictional character that makes the "ideal" Prince from Machiavelli's famous work look like a noble figure? Should we support a philosophy that relies upon feeling worthless as a vital pillar? Should we believe that a relationship started by fear and self doubt is one that has love in it? Obviously not, but if you are that insecure person living in a social circle that accepts you only as long as you believe as they do, it sure is hard to break free.

Too often we non-theists are abrasive. We usually focus on the cold logic behind why god doesn't exist in our rebuttal to theism. A Christian is such because of emotional reasons so we are more likely to reach them on that level, however we hardly ever give them any replacement for the comfort they had from Christianity. On top of that we probably often seem self righteous and judgmental. I'm not saying we shouldn't keep up the attacks on the logic of Christianity, I am simply proposing we use more tact and offer something a replacement for the void created in someone's life after leaving Christianity.

I was approached today by a bubbly red-head that used all of the above techniques of evangelism on me. She was nice and I knew she was just misguided so I didn't feel any ill-will toward her. I even wondered if I had a right to make her question this thing that was giving her such happiness. People like that make the best evangelists because others want what they have, but what many don't see is that you can be happy, at peace, and together without any religion. This is my challenge: show people that you have that "something" they want. Be kind to people, show them what it means to actually love someone. Show them how happy and content you are with yourself.

When you debate with someone on theism, don't think about the many asshats and their illogical bullshit. Those thoughts will just make you angry and the theist will not react well to your anger. Focus on the living, breathing person in front of you and care about them. Want them to be free from the lie and the drug that is making them a slave. The world will be plagued with religion until we show people by example that it is oppressive and that non-theism is a healthy, freeing alternative.

I realized something after I left xtianity. A lot of those people I thought were my friends, were not. This may be a "duh" moment to some of you but looking back I think not only do most xtians not want to be friends, they dont know how to be friends. My hubby and I didn't go to church for many years until we met a couple who we shared common interests with. We liked them a lot and spent a lot of time with them. Finally we went to their church. It seemed cool (at the time). Better worship and more laid back. As we became more involved in that church our friends who had led us there did less and less with us. It's as if they only wanted us to get into the church and then they would push us off onto others. After about 10 or so years we left church never to return. We made our new beliefs know and that was the last we heard from those original "friends". Later a mutual friend suggested that we were only a project for them. We needed to be brought to the fold and they took it upon themselves to do just that. I see it now.

I have heard xtian people I had thought were friends say "we cant really be friends, it has to be about god." and "we stopped being your friend when we became your mentors" and so on. One even suggested that the notion of a friend who loves another enough that they would gladly give their life was "weird" and "not normal".

Hello! Isn't that what their supposed Christ did for them, and what a slap in the face to our military and police who put their lives in harm's way for strangers everyday. One church we went to even went so far as to keep the small groups shuffling so that no one became to attached to anyone else in the group! EEK! A friend?!?! Get thee behind me weirdo!! I have managed to keep in touch with a handful (maybe half a dozen) xtian people who I think really are my friends. They are aware of my disbelief but we still hang out and have fun together. But the majority of the xtian people I had known blew away with the wind that washed my mind clear of xtianity. I think it's too bad really. They are missing out on what it means to have a friend and be a friend, and are passing up alot of great relationships. Maybe there will be an afterlife where they look back and realize what a bunch of suckers they were and what all they missed out on...but probably not.

I've heard it said that the United States as a nation is losing it's intellectual capacity. That we are quickly becoming (or already have become) a culture of mindless consumerism propped up by the hollow promises of fulfillment by the corporations taking our money. When I look around a Wal Mart parking lot, it's not hard to see some truth in this. A trip through the local shopping mall reveals the same. Browsing the Internet seems only to illustrate a concentrated essence of stupidity and ignorance in many of it's darkest corners.

Yet I do find that there are many intelligent and intellectually honest people out there. Their own capacity for reason lays mostly dormant as there is not much call for it during the nine to five grind. They are keeping their heads down as they struggle to keep the family fed and the bills paid. They simply don't have the time nor the interest to engage the least of us in public forums. I am speaking of the average citizen here.

We gage the intelligence of our counterparts by what we encounter in social mediums like the news, documentaries. game shows and of course, the Net. It seems that we are beaten over the head with an expectation of mediocrity on a near daily basis. Very few of the Mass Media Networks are interested in taking a stand against ignorance. They appear more interested in exploiting and profiting from it. In this light, I wouldn't expect them to promote the brightest programming. I do believe this further perpetuates the myth that we all posses the mental acuity of cattle. My outlook for humanity isn't quite this bleak however.

I would argue that the Internet itself is where logic and reason now live. It still exists in libraries but there are few who still venture into the dusty volumes contained therein. As with any game that everyone is allowed to play, even the hard core fundamentalists have a voice here. They don't have immunity against reason or impunity to act and thus they lock themselves into members only sites that moderate comments with only the brand of deluded paranoia that they could muster. This applies to many different groups good or bad.

Does it appear that intelligence as a whole is waning because the public is steeped in mindless drivel? Or is it that fact that just about every idiot with an opinion (myself included) now has access to the world wide forum of the Net? Answers in Genesis would be a mere shadow of itself if it relied exclusively on paper correspondence. Their brand of idiocy would have never been so widely broadcasted. Pat Robertson would be even less of a nobody had he not have created his little media empire.

It would appear that having access to information in real time has done much to give the illusion that we're getting dumber by the minute. Idiots are entertaining and thus what is promoted? Religion just as any other business venture has witnessed the exploitable nature of the Internet as a tool to promote their brand of ignorance. I don't think they quite expected the amount of push back that they have encountered however. They can't dominate a conversation unless in is behind the walls of their fort. (Rapture Ready anyone?) For every view, there is an opposing view not far away. Enlightenment depends on which position you choose to hang your hat on.

In conclusion, I don't think that humanity is any less intelligent that it has ever been. Then again, I don't necessarily believe that it is in any way more so either. We simply have more access to each other now. We interact with each other in a way and magnitude that has never before been seen. Bad ideas seem more rampant because they are now capable of growing wings and flying across the ethereal landscape instead of dying on the vine locally. Who will carry the day will be decided by whoever has the most concise and intelligent shot gun with which to dispose of these bad ideas before they find a purchase and procreate.

I am a mother of two, & I by no means deny them the right to any one religion. They attend church with my mother who is a Baptist in every sense of the word. She is against so many things but is accepting, in the 'its them not her' way. I am up in the air. Not sure if I believe or not. I guess you could say I rely on the more scientific facts rather than the "adult fairy tales" I heard growing up.

A few weeks ago my son asked me, 'Mommy, what does God look like?' Not Jesus, who as we all know is portrayed as having long hair & a beard. (Much like most hippies in the 70's but were they worshiped? No, they were cast aside without another thought.) Needless to say I was at a loss of words. What do I tell my 4 year old? I stumbled out that God can look like anyone, that he could be a man or a woman, of any race, and, yes I said it, he has magical powers.

I had to laugh at myself for saying that. I was brought up to believe that God (being what exactly) made the world in 6 days and rested on the 7th. How exactly? I was also raised to believe that magic is merely an illusion, not real in any way. Isn't that contradicting itself?

I also find myself wondering, how, if God made all of us, do the so called Christians think that it is ok to cast the homosexuals, thieves, murderers & liars aside like they're last weeks trash. Are they not the ones that need God the most? The ones that need to be present in church week after week? God made them just as he made us according to the Bible, so why are they considered outcasts? And, since he did make them, does that not make him a bit tarnished?

Organized religion, to me, is an excuse for gossipers to get together & talk about the neighbors yard or sex life or delinquent teenager. Its an opportunity for them to make their lives seem so much more important than those of us that do not attend church.

I guess I believe in evolution more than the mythical illusion of God & his magical powers when it comes right down to it. Maybe I'll be struck by lightening after this is submitted. At the same time, maybe I'll just go on living my life loving everyone & everything as one.

Alternative content

I am an American college student. When I was 21 years old I had an existential crisis and decided to drop everything I was doing and follow my life-long dream of going to Africa.

After much deliberation and contemplation I organized a trip to Kenya where I could use my skills to teach English at a school. I made arrangements with a school: Filadelfia School for the Destitute and Orphaned. After a day or two or getting acclimated to a new culture, it was time to dive in. Suddenly I was the teacher of 55 first graders. I relished in the chance and by the end of my three months there I had grown close to every one and loved Kenya.

This school compound was founded and supported by Danish Christian missionaries. I myself am an atheist, but I didn't see a problem. After all, I was teaching English and there was no need for my beliefs to be brought up or for me to try to 'indoctrinate' any one else; just stick to the English.

Over my three month time there, I wasn't the only white foreigner on the compound. People would come and go, some to teach, some to help in one way or another. I was, however, the only non-missionary.

By the end of my time in Kenya, I learned a lot. A lot about myself, a lot about the world, a better grasp on what I wanted in life, etc. I also learned that missionaries are one of the most contemptible people out there.

"Are you a Christian?" he asked. Uh-oh I thought. But I wasn't going to lie. "No" I said simply. He gritted his teeth "Then what are you doing here?" he asked with a tone of anger in his voice. I knew I was in a potentially troublesome situation so I tried to keep it simple. "Teaching" I responded. He stood up and sighed "Why would you be in this country if you weren't a Christian!" and walked off. Their entire mission there is to turn on as many people to Christ as they can. A mission like this can't help but show ugliness. It started one day when my students had been pretty good and I thought they might like to hear some songs from my country. One of the missionaries on the compound had a guitar and since I play a little bit, I went to ask if I might borrow it for an hour or so. I explained the situation to him; that my students had quickly got through today's assignments and behaved very well (as anyone in charge of 50 some 5-6 year olds will tell you is a rarity demanding reward) and that I might borrow his guitar for about an hour to see if they'd like some songs. "What kind of songs were you going to sing?" he asked. I hadn't really thought of it, "I dunno" I said "some old folk or blues songs. Some old love tunes. Just something nice they might like to hear from my country."

"Were you going to sing any Christian songs?"

Of course I wasn't going to sing any Christian songs as I wasn't a Christian but I respectfully said "Oh, I don't know. I hadn't thought about it. I guess I don't know any."

He told me he didn't want the kids passing his guitar round and "grubbing it up". I assured him I wouldn't pass the guitar around, but it was no dice. Instead I sung some songs with the kids without a guitar and we all shared some songs and went out to play soccer. So much for charity.

The incident I'll never forget happened outside the compound. The head Danish honchos had come down around Christmas time to see how things were going. I had ran into one outside and we talked for a moment. He asked me how I liked it here in country and I told him I loved it, as I did. I asked him and he said that he couldn't wait to return home. "It smells here" he said. "Are you a Christian?" he asked. Uh-oh I thought. But I wasn't going to lie. "No" I said simply. He gritted his teeth "Then what are you doing here?" he asked with a tone of anger in his voice. I knew I was in a potentially troublesome situation so I tried to keep it simple. "Teaching" I responded. He stood up and sighed "Why would you be in this country if you weren't a Christian!" and walked off.

This missionary found Kenya so disgusting that he was only here because he thought that he was getting his ticket to heaven. I can't lie and say I didn't go for myself, but I loved every minute. I learned so much! I have a dozen more stories about the lack or morals exhibited by missionaries during my time in Kenya, some worse than others, but I think it's all summed up in the last story. Every missionary I met didn't seem to enjoy it there, didn't want to be there.

Seems to me, if I was god and perfect-- or at least if I was god and not perfect-- I'd have made my birthday in the Spring or Summertime, not at the busiest time of the year when all my friends and family are so distracted with stuff like parking space and wrapping paper. I woulda, at least for the American version, come down to earth in March, April, June, or August (hell, I got here in the middle of May and I'm not even god), 'cause over here we got nothing going on then in the way of competing federal holidays, except Easter and Father's Day, but they're always on a Sunday anyway. Really, if god so verily, verily cared about us, wouldn't he have thought ahead and given us another 3-day weekend during those months? Just more evidence that god is as artificial as that plastic tree and ornaments I got.

Still, if you're as sympathetic as I am about all this, I've started a Secret Santa list of things we can all get jesus for his birthday-- or Christmas-- or whatever it is. Now, it's not easy to make this list for a man who has everything. But I have noticed some things he seems to lack--

A Bible Concordance: So he can see that that some of the passages he taught or inspired his disciples to teach aren't there and don't say that.

A Facebook Page: So he can friend and keep track of his twelve disciples, because he listed them wrong in the lists in his book.

A Copy Of "Twas The Night Before Christmas": Just to hint that, hmmm, it coulda been better to stick with eight instead of twelve tiny disciples and give them rhythmic, rhyming names to help keep them straight-- Dasher, Dancer, Prancer and Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder and Blitzen. And I woulda liked the idea of a "Gospel According To Cupid."

A Copy Of The DVD "The Wizard Of Oz": Happier ending, similar fantasy, really.

A Twitter Account: So he can tweet us if he does anything he thinks we'd notice. And he can update us on what he's been doing for the last 2000 years. And the zillions of years before Zero-Zero A.D. (I'm really not interested, though, in what he says he's gonna do in the next zillion-zillion years, seeing that his word's not that good anyway.)

A Noah's Ark Playset: So we can see if he drowns all his toys as a little boy, just like dad.

Clothing And Accessories: A WWJD t-shirt. Or wrist band. Or headband.

Cookies And Milk: Now that's a celebration, Santa Claus. But that little plain wafer and low octane grape juice? Seriously?

A Red Letter Bible: So he can watch what he says. 'Cause, well, a bunch of it has me wondering whether a decent, honest man really said it.

A DayPlanner: So he can see he's late.

Music: Pretty much anything that'll drown out that stuff in his head. (Except, no, nothing by Nine Inch Nails or Judas Priest. Be sensitive, dude.)

Awww, wait-- I just realized-- Jesus gets Hanukkah AND Christmas. The rest of us don't.

So, never mind then.

Oh, well, it doesn't look like I'm getting enough extra money this Christmas anyway. But it's the thought that counts, right? ("Whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart"-- spoken like a true monk that crawled out of the caves of Qu'mram and across the wilderness of the mideast to tell the rest of us normal people what we should think about god-- but that's another story.)

But..... If you get any extra money at Christmas, do you wanna go all in with me and get him a really nice suit for Good Friday?

Disclaimer: Although my thoughtfulness toward Jesus here could be considered irreverent by some, I want to make sure you understand that I do have a reverence for life and I would say the same things about, say, the gods Zeus, Thor, the Egyptian gods, the Aztec or Mayan gods, and others if we celebrated their birthdays right in the middle of Christmas. (And you can tell that I do maintain that decorum of reverence for life by the fact that I didn't spoof Mooohamed's god.)

Bishop Eddie Long has been linked to a controversial mortgage scheme. CBSAtlanta reports:

CBS Atlanta News has found Bishop Eddie Long and another local megachurch leader, Gary Hawkins, are linked to a questionable mortgage venture that is being investigated by the feds.

CBS Atlanta was the first to report on Matrix Capital’s long list of victims. The company promised to lower people’s mortgages for $1,500 upfront. Police say thousands of homeowners paid Matrix money, but according to investigators, most of them ended up in bankruptcy and losing their homes.

So many people trusted Matrix Capital front man Fred Lee because he made promises of lowering people’s mortgages in the sanctity of their local church.

FAYETTE COUNTY, Iowa - A Westgate pastor was sentenced Monday in Fayette County District Court to 20 years for sexually abusing a 12-year-old girl in June 2009.

Timothy Parker, 40, a former pastor with St. Peter Lutheran Church in Westgate pleaded guilty to two counts of third-degree sexual abuse in November. Each abuse charge carries a 10 year prison term and judge ran them consecutively.

According to the criminal complaint, on three separate occasions, Parker fondled or performed oral sex on the girl. Deputies said the alleged incidents took place at the church parsonage in early June 2009.

Victim impact statements were read during the sentencing but First Judicial District Judge John Bauercamper would not release the written statements to the media. .

Parker still faces four counts of violating a no contact order in September. He is accused of attempting to contact the victim and family members by giving letters to Pastor Ronnie Koch, who was visiting Parker at the Fayette County jail. Koch, 44, of Fredericksburg was charged as an accessory for allegedly mailing the letters.

OREGON CITY, Ore. – The simply-lettered white, rust-streaked sign on Molalla Avenue for the Followers of Christ Church sways in a cold December breeze, its simplicity masking the complex and contentious stories that have come out of the insular religous organization over the years. Now, a former member of the church has come forward to shed some light on what church members’ lives are like under the tight control church leaders exert over their followers.

Christians are told that they must believe the salvation story of the bible or be damned. The threat is often put in such threatening, frightening words and images that the fear of a mistake is pushed very, very deep. Many people suffer constant, life-long anxiety for their occasional doubts. I don’t have this fear, and perhaps my reasons for that can help someone else. And so I offer the following.

How could it make sense to punish me with eternal torment because the bible and preachers were unable to convince me of something? Is it really my fault that they made a weak case? Maybe their case was good enough for some, but I found it unconvincing. After all, no Jesus or god appeared before me to prove their case. All I ever got, to base a decision on, were the words of the bible, and its interpreters and promoters. I never saw any direct – in this world - evidence. I got no more evidence for the salvation story than I got for the divinity of Mohammed. A claim in a book, that’s all. So I believe in neither. And you’re already halfway to my position.

If a philosopher fails to convince a reader of the correctness of his theory, is it the reader’s fault? If you tell me a story full of miracles (scientific impossibilities, by definition) and I can’t believe your story, should I really be blamed? Should I be punished? If I told you that I saw two cows flying over my neighbor’s house last week, should I blame you for not believing it? It seems to me that the burden of proof is on the one making the claim. To punish me (or you) for someone else’s failure to make a convincing case is absurd. I refuse to take responsibility for another’s failings, and I cannot believe a sensible god would fault me for this.

Some of the faithful would argue that I have “hardened my heart,” and that is why I cannot believe in the salvation story. But how would that be possible? How does one simply decide he is not going to believe something, if it is true, and there is at least some evidence? Could I just decide that the sun is not warm? If the evidence is before me, and it is convincing, like the heat on my face on a sunny summer day, how could I deny the fact? And even if I could, why would I gamble my life? I am of sound mind. If I thought there was even the slightest chance that the salvation story was true, I would want to do everything I could to ensure my salvation. Only a fool or an idiot would do otherwise and risk eternal pain. No, I have not hardened my heart; I don’t know how to do that, and, anyway, the stakes are far too high.

If we think about this a bit, shouldn’t we be suspicious when someone tells us that we just have to take their word for something? Doesn’t that make the claimant sound just a trifle desperate? Doesn’t that suggest he may be trying to “sell us a bridge?” The bible doesn’t tell us how we can be sure that we can live forever, it only tells us that we must believe it. That is a key point. But, if the bible told us how we can be sure this claim is true, then we WOULD believe it. We wouldn’t need to be told that we MUST believe it. If the bible really provided the proof, then no one would doubt it, and the bible would not demand that we believe it.

Shouldn’t we be suspicious when someone tells us that we just have to take their word for something? Do you begin to see why I have very serious reservations about this salvation claim the bible makes? The bible doesn’t tell me how I can know that it’s true, it doesn’t prove it; it merely tells me I must believe it. Sorry, but that just makes me suspicious. It sure looks to me like the guys who wrote this stuff didn’t know for sure, and that fact is shown in the way they wrote about it. Their claims are simply not convincing to me.

How cruel and insensitive would a god have to be to allow me to miss out on an eternity in the bliss of heaven, just because his spokesmen made a weak, unconvincing case? Do you think I would deserve such a punishment? If you were on the jury, could you say, “Guilty,” knowing what my sentence would be? Could your god be less understanding and compassionate than you, do you think?

Consider for a moment that it’s the use of our brains, our power of reason, which saves us from being sucked into the schemes of religious scammers like Jim Jones (Guyana), David Koresh (Waco, TX.), and Mohammed. That can’t be a bad thing.

I don’t believe the salvation story of the bible (there are actually several). There are just too many inconsistencies and miracles in it, and too little evidence for us to examine today. And you don’t have to believe it either. No god worthy of the name could fault either of us for doubting a poorly argued claim; that’s what our brains are for, after all.

I submitted the following to the Letters-to-the-editor page of a local weekly newspaper, where I have published many times. That it was not printed proves, in my estimation, that there are areas where free speech is not welcome.

[I stand corrected. Believe it or not, this letter, without any edits, was indeed published the week following, in the Lincoln County News, here in Maine. This is one courageous, dedicated editor.]

No Offense Meant

"Editorially Speaking," of 12/02/10 reminds us to loosen up, so to speak, in our observances of the coming holiday season, of our varying interpretations of Christmas. The editorial insists, “We respect the rights of all Americans to life, liberty...and we would add that liberty includes the option of being offended, and for those so inclined, offers plenty of opportunity to take offense." (I’m not sure what "plenty" of offense means.)

One of my favorite melodies belongs to an American folk-hymn which begins with the words, “I wonder as I wander out under the sky, why Jesus our savior was born for to die." This is the central message of the Nativity. Many years ago I came across a quote by a famous man who was asked what he thought of a Christmas service he attended. He remarked quite honestly, “It would be a beautiful story, if it were true." I'm sure that some who heard those words were offended.

Every year when the Yuletide season arrives, I am reminded of this remark, as it differs so much from everything else that is said. And I must say after much thought, in spite of the fact that one is taught to believe and not think, I must disagree with the man; it is not a beautiful story, either. If the only purpose for a child to be born is to be slaughtered, then I reject it as devaluing a human life, rendering it no more valuable than that of livestock, whether one believes the story or not. To demand that another human being suffer and die an agonizing death, when alternative compensations are available to the parent, is especially indifferent and repugnant to a moral person. I am offended that others are not offended by these things. I protect my children, and if I can prevent them from coming to harm, I will. And, if I knew my child would die a horrible death, and I would not be able to prevent it, I would not have that child to begin with. Not all the glory in the universe could replace his life.

Are we not human the same as you? Do we not feel if you hurt us, do we not bleed and bruise when you strike us? Just because you are off fighting a spiritual war with the enemy and his minions, are we "heathens" only concerned about the flesh and gratifying the pleasures within?

Are we some lowly thing that needs your preaching and your knowledge?

You pretend you have it all figured out. You have answers to all the questions, and your stance depends on the denomination that suits your preference of how god should be the best.

But I know deep down you are the same, questioning, doubting, searching for an answer. Why do we know this, because we may have been you, a week, a month maybe years ago.

You find comfort and security in your blanket of religious beliefs, regardless of how ridiculous they may seem. I believe because I believe! Why because you have a personal relationship with your god. We do too, yes even now, because we have come to the place where maybe with some shame we can admit that our religious convictions weren't from an all knowing powerful god, but from within. From the inner parts that cry out for love, acceptance, from our own imaginations. What a wonderful place to be, indeed.

But that is your world, and mine is different. I cannot stand by falsehood and the agenda you present me with. You argue your religion with much debating and merits, and yet you too are scared to touch on the pool of evidence and facts. The mighty spirit that lives within you does not make you a new creation; it does not make the foolish of this world look wise.

It makes me sick to the stomach when you ask why we would need encouragement! Why do you come here to spew your beliefs and opinions? Do you really not understand that realizing god is a fairy tale hurts; many of us were just a zealous about our faith as what you are. To come to the end and realize that it was all just in our heads, much as what it is in yours!

It makes me sick to the stomach when you ask why we would need encouragement!

I may speak for many when I say that my Christianity controlled every aspect of my life! It is so deeply ingrained in everything I did. My work. My family. My friends. My reading choices. My movie choices. The way I dressed. The way I presented myself. I came here to connect with others, who have more compassion and caring, who KNOW what it is that I am going through, more than your religion with an agenda! Think you are getting that extra shiny crown when you are up in heaven because you think you can argue with people who have gone through the questions and used their own brain to figure out it’s a fantasy! Your circular reasoning makes no sense and your answers mean nothing.

Seriously don’t you get it? We have been there! We have argued it over and over again if not with others with ourselves. Wake up!

Stop being an asshole, and just realize if we wanted you here, wanted your opinion, we would have gone to the Christians around us. As I am no longer welcome in the church as a sinful, rebellious, heathen, your comments and clever revelations are not welcome on my posts!

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