Thursday, August 30, 2012

Remembrance and 3 Months

Today August 19 is a day to remember the babies and infants we have lost. I remember my beautiful newborn baby girl. Skylar Jean Wyatt, Who was born into the loving arms of Jesus on May 18, 2012

A child was never wanted or loved more than she is. Some days are easier than other's, What I miss the most is all that I am missing out on. I would love to be the overtired mom of 7, I am a Mom of 7 just one resides in heaven.

Today, When we went to Old Navy I saw the cutest little 0-3 months romper that would have been cute on Skylar. Except it probably would have been to small by now at 3 months.

Some days it is so easy to be mad and say it just not fair that my baby is not here. I am truly trying to stop this but it is not easy. As for the depression, I would say right now I am having a hard time at times. I am truly trying to ease up on it and in time I know it will get better. I just have to take it one day at a time.

I guess I am at the denial stage of the grief journey. I know Skylar is gone, Yet I cannot wrap my mind around the actuality that she is not coming back. I mean it's just weird at times. I know my baby girl is not here, yet I want her to be so bad. I just feel like this is a bad dream at times. Yet, it is not it just seems to hard to try and move past things.

I cannot forget that Skylar was here or born. With my family here lately I have been talking about her a little bit and showing them her pictures. We just have to go to visit her spot and take her the butterfly solar light. I am sure she will love her nightlight.

Another thing to add is that with all the kids in school it can make the depression come on stronger but I will be trying my best to make sure I am going to not feel so sad. Anytime kids go to school it makes things a little more sad. Yet my two boys will keep me entertained.