Possible Future of Fragrance II.

(A fictional comic drama.)

Now that the only fragrances available, due to regulation is Eau de Eau and it's flankers Eau de Noir, and Eau de Pain, two of the three remaining companies are closing down distribution in order to increase sales, closing for vacation, discussing retirement plans, in order to improve bottom line profits and now having problems with acquisition of natural resources (h2o) and looking into possible synthetic h2o which, is cheaper.

Re: Possible Future of Fragrance II.

And non-sparkling, still, bottled mineral water might be sold as the new and most expensive niche fragrance, even if it will not be obtainable from a natural source any longer and will all come from the same lab or factory anyway (I just hope this dramatization, comical or not, does not go as far).

Re: Possible Future of Fragrance II.

I find it delightful that the Emperor's New Clothes-style pisstake about the "future of fragrance" is in fact not as far from what's happening right now than one might think. People are already buying this type of silliness in the form of homeopathic products.

Re: Possible Future of Fragrance II.

Originally Posted by N_Tesla

(A fictional comic drama.)

Now that the only fragrances available, due to regulation is Eau de Eau and it's flankers Eau de Noir, and Eau de Pain, two of the three remaining companies are closing down distribution in order to increase sales, closing for vacation, discussing retirement plans, in order to improve bottom line profits and now having problems with acquisition of natural resources (h2o) and looking into possible synthetic h2o which, is cheaper.

The fate of fragrance is, no doubt, in safe hands.

As a representative of [Random Big Name Perfume House] I am shocked and astounded by your accusations, sir! Our products are made just as they always have, using the formula written by Saint Augustine of Hippo as given to him by the angel Gabriel, guarded by an order of Benedictine monks who gave it to us on the condition of strict adherence to tradition! The organic unicorn tails, fairy tears, essence of Egyptian Pharaoh (TM), distilled absolute of Louis the 14th, tincture of Beowulf, and Yggdrasil concentrate are all macerated in the Holy Grail and stirred with the finger bone of a saint by blond Swedish virgins before being bottled in ancient pottery crafted by Qin Shi Huang, the First Emperor. We would never think to deviate from this long and proud tradition of perfumery and can assure you that even though the IFRA has forced its ghastly regulations on us, effectively outlawing all ingredients except water, we have never changed our ingredients or formula. Our perfume today is made exactly as it was thousands of years ago, if thousands of years ago it was made with only water. We have also patented a secret process using the Large Hadron Collider and Sumerian blood alchemy to transmute the water (not that we are using water) into the original formula, the one we have never deviated from and would not on pain of death. Sincerely,
Your Friends in the Perfume Industry