Recollections of the Private Life of Napoleon — Complete eBook

I recall another anecdote concerning the young son
of the Emperor, which was related to me by his Majesty
himself one evening when I was undressing him as usual,
and at which the Emperor laughed most heartily.
“You would not believe,” said he, “the
singular reward my son desired of his governess for
being good. Would she not allow him to go and
wade in the mud?” This was, true, and proves,
it seems to me, that the greatness which surrounds
the cradle of princes cannot eradicate from their minds
the singular caprices of childhood.

CHAPTER III.

All the world is familiar with the name of the Abbe
Geoffroy of satirical memory, who drove the most popular
actors and authors of the time to desperation.
This pitiless Aristarchus must have been most ardently
enamored of this disagreeable profession; for he sometimes
endangered thereby, not his life, which many persons
would have desired earnestly perhaps, but at any rate
his health and his repose. It is well, doubtless,
to attack those who can reply with the pen, as then
the consequences of the encounter do not reach beyond
the ridicule which is often the portion of both adversaries.
But Abbe Geoffroy fulfilled only one of the two conditions
by virtue of which one can criticise,—­he
had much bitterness in his pen, but he was not a man
of the sword; and every one knows that there are persons
whom it is necessary to attack with both these weapons.

An actor whom Geoffroy had not exactly flattered in
his criticisms decided to avenge himself in a piquant
style, and one at which he could laugh long and loud.
One evening, foreseeing what would appear in the journal
of the next day, he could think of nothing better than
to carry off Geoffroy as he was returning from the
theater, and conduct him with bandaged eyes to a house
where a schoolboy’s punishment would be inflicted
on this man who considered himself a master in the
art of writing.

This plan was carried out. Just as the abbe regained
his lodging, rubbing his hands perhaps as he thought
of some fine point for tomorrow’s paper, three
or four vigorous fellows seized him, and conveyed him
without a word to the place of punishment; and some
time later that evening, the abbe, well flogged, opened
his eyes in the middle of the street, to find himself
alone far from his dwelling. The Emperor, when
told of this ludicrous affair, was not at all amused,
but, on the contrary, became very angry, and said
that if he knew the authors of this outrage, he would
have them punished. “When a man attacks
with the pen,” he added, “he should be
answered with the same weapon.” The truth
is also that the Emperor was much attached to M. Geoffroy,
whose writings he did not wish submitted to censure
like those of other journalist. It was said in
Paris that this predilection of a great man for a caustic
critic came from the fact that these contributions
to the Journal of the Empire, which attracted much
attention at this period, were a useful diversion to
the minds of the capital. I know nothing positively
in regard to this; but when I reflect on the character
of the Emperor, who wished no one to occupy themselves
with his political affairs, these opinions seem to
me not devoid of foundation.