Wednesday, October 31, 2012

In lieu of a standard-issue d12 table, tonight's offering comes in the form of a Halloweeny one-page adventure (12 rooms in there, though).
Download at once! While its still Halloween!Flesh for the Witch Queen

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

d12
1. Labor tirelessly on a colossal beehive-like structure of unknown design and purpose
2. Only devour other types of undead
3. Erupt with pressurized jets of noxious gases when punctured
4. Are so vastly ancient, their tissues so dessicated by time, they can only move a total of a few feet per day of unceasing effort
5. Walk effortlessly on walls and ceiling
6. Restrain and carry off living subjects for the necromancer's unspeakable experiments
7. Emit a constant barrage of literally mind-bending shrieks
8. Arise from the mass graves of great battle on each anniversary for grim reenactment
9. Carry the house of their strange master on their innumerable backs
10. Actively seek out select individuals for relentless pursuit and destruction, ignoring all others
11. Comprise the entire population of an otherwise normal fishing village, going about their daily routines as if nothing has happened
12. Have plenty to say on the deplorable conditions of the afterlife, if only someone would listen

Monday, October 29, 2012

d12
1. Lashes out with extensible bandage to bind and entangle foes
2. Dribbles a trail of tiny black puddings from dessicated lips
3. Intends to reclaim time-lost dominion by presenting ancient but progressive policies and entirely sensible arguments to the land's current occupants
4. Upon awakening urgently seeks out those of high station to impart ancient prophecies of the utmost importance to the present day
5. Must restore its tissues in fortnightly baths of the purest virgin blood
6. Seeks out a party of bold adventurers to join, offering knowledge of untapped treasure troves from bygone eras
7. Makes immediate war upon all living things with no exceptions (yes, even plants) until extermination complete or destroyed
8. Crumbled into bits and pieces ages ago, all of which attack the living to the best of their ability
9. Reeks so offensively it could literally kill someone of fragile constitution
10. Upon revival sets itself to the task for which it was created: pyramid building
11. Lathered with fireproof embalming goo
12. Has hill giant size hands for manually decapitating tomb robbers

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

d12
1. The sun has dimmed: civilization scrambles, anarchic panic imminent, vampires rub hands in anticipatory glee
2. Sudden inexplicable arcane feedback renders all magic users not shielded beneath the earth irretrievably insane
3. Nightmare plague crawls up from the bowels of the earth, sweeps across continent
4. Homo Superior shows up, announces primacy: fully half the human population reveal themselves as the nature's new ruling class
5. New gods arrive, kick the crap out of some of the old standbys as example, begin massive purge of clergy, embark upon campaign of terror
6. International tumult in strategic zone rears ugly head, sets powers that be into apoplexy of saber-rattling, back pedalling and marshaling of every available force, martial law declared
7. Accidental penetration of subterranean cryogenic suspension menagerie triggers latest return of the dinosaurs who turn out to be not half as stupid as previously believed
8. Terror grips the city-state as robots from the future start teleporting in and murdering seemingly random individuals
9. Witch Queen shocks the world with demonstration of eldritch arsenal, air supremacy and list of unpleasant demands
10. The dead rise from their graves: totally uninterested in devouring the flesh of the living, they instead attempt to re-occupy former residences, make withdrawals from banking establishments, join the queue for bread at the bakery, show up for work, etc.
11. Reality breach! Planar collision swallows up opposite half of world, interdimensional invasion forces muster at ever-encroaching borderline, physical laws become increasingly unreliable
12. Sorry adventurers! Gold reduced to symbolic status, stripped of monetary value in favor of entirely imaginary state currency, declared property of the state, confiscated for secret stockpile

Sunday, October 21, 2012

d12
1. Enterprising extra-dimensional visitor looking to replace ruling class with androids
2. Under-appreciated demigod needs a hero shortage so he can fill the gap w/own exploits
3. Super rich plutocrat would like extensive list of dissenting voices permanently silenced
4. Demon in guise as messianic prophet requires extermination of kings, queens, emirs, autocrats, popes, lords, presidents, etc. for proper chaos to ensue
5. Wealthy serial killer currently chained to dungeon wall hiring by proxy (extremely well-paid agents) to ensure completion of bucket list
6. Dragon seeks to employ super-assassin or team to whack rival dragon and retrieve favored items from hoard
7. Chief god of the pantheon needs illegitimate offspring out of the way before his celestial wife finds out the extent of his philandering
8. Sorcerer hopes to attain supremacy by annihilating competitors and ascertaining their secrets
9. Symbolic leader of anarchist insurgency thought to actually be secret cabal, now scattered to numerous wilderness hiding places: not a single one can be suffered to live
10. Charlatan high priest needs idle threats issued publicly as "unholy curse" cunningly carried out to avoid career-destroying humiliation
11. Star chamber of research sorcerers have cracked code that will abolish chaos from the universe and prevent destruction of the (campaign) world: they (and their work) must never be seen again
12. Prognostication indicates incredibly dire future should certain individuals not yet born attain adulthood: for the sake of the nation, their parents must die

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

d12
1. Defrocked cleric of chaos w/tentacle beard rants and raves re: the end times (w/100% accuracy as it turns out)
2. The Outdoor Librarian: has books/scrolls/tablets/etchings/etc. on wide range of outré subjects stashed in nooks and crannies throughout city
3. Filthy, reeking, besotted ex-bard, knows a song on most every subject, lucid only for brief window each day
4. Huge ex-magic user, cast permanent enlarge on self before dedicating life to perpetual bender
5. The Human Pincushion: totally unharmed by slicing or stabbing attacks, likes to dare fighters to unarmored duels w/heavy wagering
6. High level pimp (ftr/mu/th), deranged on bad black lotus, on rampage of extreme random aggression
7. Man wearing armor made from street detritus wears stack of helms simultaneously, one of which is rather special
8. Former style consultant to the rich and famous gone psycho-killer using sewing needles dipped in nerve toxin
9. Ascetic panhandlers levitate in lotus position while calling out for alms telepathically
10. Emaciated ogre wearing false beard/heavy cloak to avoid detection sells items on blanket after secretly devouring former owners
11. Retired warrior of supreme talent renounced violence after religious awakening/mental breakdown, proselytizes to fighters relentlessly (if in any way wounded, goes completely berserk, killing everyone in sight with improvised weapons)
12. The Masked Agitator shrieks out anti-plutocratic screeds to all and sundry until city guard summoned, continues lecture while eviscerating pawns of the system then disappears into the night

Saturday, October 13, 2012

d12
1. Pre-dawn intrusion by drunk dungeon acquaintance w/axe to grind (possibly former hireling) and equally loaded gang of armed miscreants
2. Medium tortured by spirits of deceased enemies of PCs who will not rest while denied full airing of grievances
3. Hired assassins making clean sweep of possible loose cannons before employers attempt uprising against current powers-that-be
4. Bearer of bad tidings: in what might be a case of mistaken identity, messenger reports grisly murder of far flung PC relative
5. Government officials, accompanied by special attachment of elite warriors, come to inform PCs of revocation of adventuring licenses for some obscure political reason
6. Dark-robed and masked royal innoculators distribute mandatory anti-plague injections in response to outbreak, refusal results in arrest, imprisonment in wretched quarantine zone
7. Gang of youthful troublemakers vying for entrance into criminal organization, go out of their way to gain entry in hopes of securing an impressive trophy
8. Adventure tax collectors w/squad of bloodthirsty mercenaries present papers authorizing full audit, search and seizure
9. Gaggle of blissed-out religious fanatics called upon by unmentionable deity to convert PCs to cult if its the last thing they do
10. Candidates for trivial local offices (pauper council, alms department chief, street pudding abatement man) going door to door delivering their tiresome pitches
11. Salesman and shills attempting to move new and improved adventuring equipment at premium prices, high end mountaineering gear, specialized weapons and tools, 10, 11, and 12 foot poles, etc.
12. Debt collectors looking for previous occupants of residence, highly sceptical of PCs claims of identity, prepared for rough stuff as necessary

Sunday, October 7, 2012

d12
1. For treason: highly satirical bard with broad fan-base among the city's youth
2. For blasphemy: gaggle of impish street waifs who seem to delight in defacing holy sites
3. For adultery: wanton spouse of city official, now in hiding w/one of many lovers
4. For loan racketeering: extremely clever and elusive Masked Money-changer, protected by hired assassins
5. For illegal arms dealing: former dwarf lord with connections living in exile in thieves' quarter
6. For kidnapping: giant chambered nautiloid w/mind control powers operating in city sewers
7. For unlawful sorcery: recently sacked sub-vizier, popular astrologer to the upper classes
8. For ESP-detected thought crimes: high priest of minor chaos temple
9. For molestation of a person of greater social station: Gandhi-like hero to the underclasses
10. For extortion: entirety of local shipping guild, services being replaced by navy
11. For failure to honor holy days: retired war hero notable for outspoken skepticism
12. For tax evasion: occupants of the rather scary looking ancient mansion on the hill, surrounded by beast-populated moat w/semi-human figures patrolling grounds by night

Monday, October 1, 2012

d12
1. Secret meeting place for halfling conspirators: plot calls for bloody uprising against snooty plutocrats back in the shire, equitable redistribution of wealth, many small instruments of war stockpiled
2. Escapees from imperial chain gang holing up for the night: murderous wretches willing to do anything to avoid capture up to and including bearing torches and 10' poles for pitiless adventurers
3. Powerful mystic enduring year long fast while levitating in lotus position, somewhat irritated if disturbed
4. Troll with unpleasant proclivity for crafting and displaying dolls fashioned from the remains of his victims
5. Lone hill giant, former chief ousted in coup led by dastardly rival, fomenting vengeance while lying on belly in cramped crypt
6. Refitted into shabby temple to chaos gods by man-apes just getting into the religion thing
7. Spiritual infestation by hateful shades of those slaughtered in purges during the ancient king's reign
8. Annexed by predatory subterranean worms for use as larder: filled to the brim w/underworld prey creatures living (for freshness) and dead
9. Clutch of very large eggs of unknown provenance
10. Gaggle of transient performers: lost and on the verge of starvation, numbers reduced due to monster predation, still up for putting on a show at a moments notice
11. God of the Rats: crazed wizard bearing ancient king's crown and scepter, worshipped as a god by great hordes of permanently ensorceled giant rats, carry him around crowd surfing style, see to every need
12. Undead form of the ancient king, subject to instant destruction if he leaves the crypt, but perfectly amicable, talkative and totally uninterested in devouring the flesh of the living