Angry Drunk Elephants Are The Biggest New Threat To Humans

They’ve tasted our booze and now It’s only a matter of time until that get a taste of our sweet sweet human blood!

A herd of elephants all sauced up on moonshine recently went rampaging through the streets of India. According to metro the giant belligerent drunks busted through a store, three houses and ruined crops in Dumurkota, India.

I have never trusted the elephant community in the past, mainly because I never trust anything that eats with its nose. Now that I know these giant ugly creatures are sipping on moonshine and stumbling down the streets like a drunken abusive uncle, you can bet I’m never taking my eyes off them. I’m all about getting drunk and partying, but I don’t want to drink with anything that will potentially flatten me like a one of Betty White's breast when it finds out we don’t have any more booze.