i forgot why its been long
ive changed because im not so angry anymore
im learning to control my temper
i was in therapy and i see people now
i see a social worker
and an eating disorder specialist
and things are settling down regading my temper
ive matured alot
obviously u cant see that atm becaus i am panicking and very stressed
im sorry for everything i done to people here
i knwom you probably wont take me back
just need some serious spport before i do somethign stupid
i dont know anymore

my close friend is in hospital
she took a lethal overdose
she has severe bulimia and is severely malnutritioned
her liver is damaged
she has low b/p
she is not doing well at all
im so scared ill loose her
i need her
shes my baby girl
i love her so much
shes like a sister tome...

Hey, hey, hey. Stop. Nobody has the right to feel worse than me. :hug: I'm fighting a baaaaad Xanax addiction, poor diet myself (about a meal a day) and can damned depressed.

It takes a fair serious breech to get banned around here, and I've only been here a year so probably don't know ya.

I know pain when I here it though and you're neck-deep in it. I empathize with you being so low, 'bout as low as you feel you can get maybe? Worried sick over your friend? Hey buddy c'mere :hug: :shake: Damn, wish could do more and holding back from saying "I'm sure SF will..." because I just know and it be pretty reckless to comfort you that way.

And so I echo Hazel: Keep talking to us, most definitely.

Oh. And give them a little time to deliberate and stuff as these guys have a lot to oversee.

I believe I do know and I have never hated you, nor could I. I am glad to hear she has been released from the hospital. That is a good thing. Maybe you can celebrate the fact that she is still alive. She may need your support right now. I know it is hard when you are feeling so badly yourself, but maybe it will be good for both of you. It is okay to cry. Sometimes we need to do that. :cuddle2: :hug:

I do agree with you ToHelp. Clearly this person is going through a lot and it would be wrong of us to shut them out. BUT saying that, the staff know the reasons behind this persons ban. And they may be unsure as to whether said person will do it again. I can understand why the staff are deliberating. It's a hard choice to make. But, unregistered, please keep talking to us. :hug:

ive been very nasty to people but i have changed
my temper is the worst or it was
thats a reason whyh
but
i dont even have enough energy to yell anymore
or to even put up a fight
or defend muyself
i feel so lowa
just i want to cry so much
im in bed so much of the time
im losing weight fast(good thijng as im a fat cow though)
myu body is messed up
i dont know anymore what to do
please tke me backim a girl btw..
my name
was
...
*sigh*
no ulll all hate me i cant say it

To not let such a lonely soul back into SF, the last refuge for most of us... is simply sad. We all know what it's like being rejected.

Mark Twain (I love this guy) - "None of us likes to be hated, none of us likes to be shunned".

Especially we on this forum, who have been through so much hatred and shunning. I know that this person has been banned for breaking the rules, but she has come back, and she is literally begging.

SHE HAS WILLINGLY THROWN AWAY HER DIGNITY for the privilege of being on this site. It's that important to her. If that doesn't make up for whatever she has done, nothing will, because she can't possibly do any more than this. It's impossible. I don't believe in denying her even a trial account.

Of course, we all know sorry doesn't cut it sometimes. But rejection from even here, the stadium of rejects... I don't know how I would bear it.

BUT saying that, the staff know the reasons behind this persons ban. And they may be unsure as to whether said person will do it again. I can understand why the staff are deliberating. It's a hard choice to make.

Click to expand...

Yeah I can imagine. DO OR CAUSE NO HARM to fellow members was likely the infraction and if such was the case then a good majority of all 17 or so mods must pretty much be in agreement.

i jus
want to come back
to the place
i felt
was once
my home
im sorry
for everything ive odne
to all thelovely peopole here
i know some peopl e cosndider me scum
and worthess
and horrible
adn dont want me back
i deseve that
im so sorry
please let me come back