Thursday, December 15, 2016

Unfriending your friends to parent your pets

For those who know me know that I like pets even though I don't currently have any. That being said, I treat them like a pet, not a person (although it's not a popular opinion among animal lovers).

In short, a pet doesn't talk, is covered in fur/feathers, doesn't vote or pay taxes. Not too long ago they were regulated to the outdoors, but ever since they've been - super - domesticated, they've lived the life of riley, with many people raising them as if they're children.

My friend Z is the embodiment of this kind of pet person.

Even though she's passive-aggressive to most things in life, she's more caring than what she lets on. Her pets have meant a lot to her (this stems from abandonment issues related back to her absentee father who later left the family and divorced her mother), and that's an issue. She's far too attached to them.

She's bailed several times over her pets. One dog of hers was never healthy from the time she adopted it from the pound (it has acupuncture, physical therapy, and even takes the occasional dose of anti-anxiety medication), so she stresses over it. She's a parent to her pets. And because of this, the dog takes precedence over most things in her life - especially human relationships.

And while pets offer "unconditional love" (I don't believe this since there are many pets that are real bitches), they're not the ones who will date you, be there for an emergency, answer the phone when you need help, or tell you when you look good in that pair of pants (even if you look fat in them).

When you're always pushing people aside for the sake of your pet, they feel neglected and begin to fade away from your life. They shouldn't be surprised when they realize they no longer have any friends when they put their pets first.