Limerick Poems About Trees | Tree Limerick Poems

MrsSanta on last Christmas Eve
Was so naughty , at trying to deceive.
Not the slightest bit coy
When she met her toy~boy....
Now , believe what YOU want to believe
Rudolf the randy raindeer
Took his lady friend out for a beer.
Then he took off his clothes.
Showed~off his red nose..
Saying.who the hell said, I was queer...
What's the worst place at Christmas to be ?
Perhaps a turkey~dish laced with gravy....
It's more painful and airy
To be some poor fairy
With your +++ on the top of the tree
A COOL YULE , TO ALL YOU GOOD SOUPERS.....

I would like to tell you the story
Of a drunken man named Rory
Who liked his pint of ale
Every day with-out fail
In the morning he looked rather gory
He would make his way to the pub
Where he would have a drink and some grub
Then go merrily on his way
Drunk as a skunk they would say
Home to bathe in a tin tub
He would walk the several miles home
Down the country lanes he would roam
Weeing were all could see
Singing the rose of Tralee
While carrying a garden gnome
One night he spotted a man
He spoke to and asked if he can
Give him a light
No reply so a fight
But it was a tree he battered then ran
Waking in the morning hands sore
Found bandaged fingers all four
He decided that day
No more drink he did say
And he never drank a drop more

For New Brother Saved A Gift
White snow softly fell to the ground;
Wild animals would roam all around;
Saw a Christmas tree shining bright;
God had made us such a pretty sight.
Gifts under a tree were there all laid;
Near fire place we played and played;
Parents did have to make a decision;
Tell us Santa is real not just a vision.
That night we had started off to bed,
After all of our prayers had been said;
Make sure Santa comes to our house,
Brought a gift for our little pet mouse.
On top of roof sound had been heard;
A miracle on Christmas night occurred;
Our mother we love beyond all worth,
To another new son has given birth.
After Christmas was over and done,
Each of us a gift we had saved one,
So to our new brother we could give,
Who with us together here does live.
Jim Horn

Why are you coming around again?
Unlike Bo Derek, you are no ten.
Your head’s full of air.
For you, I don’t care.
Go and try your luck with other men.
Didn’t you get the message the first time?
To see you back here seems like a crime.
You should hit the road.
Haul away your load.
A nearby tall tree is what you should climb.

Ddddddddddddddt, Dddddddddddddt
By
Tom Wright
There was a man, who had two wooden legs,
Who was attacked one day gathering eggs.
The woodpecker thought,
It was the tree he sought,
Until he’d whittled both his legs into pegs.

Once long ago on a school visit to the zoo
My little one had just begun elementary school
High up on a tree branch sat a lonely owl
With his huge eyes shut, he could pass for any old fowl
Suddenly, he opened them and questioned, “Who? Who?”

I asked the old fruit tree out back
To bare something sweet for a snack
Went back the next day
His root was displayed
I chopped him down quick in one whack
an original poem by the poemdog Daniel Turner

We’re not called upon to choose anything we live through;
Neither parent nor sibling nor school nor form of sinew;
Neither colour of hair or eye or skin,
Nor love or hate, nor loss or gain
Nor opportunities nor whence we comeSo much is true.
But as much as this truth I hold as true as sunlight,
I know that painful times will time to time alight
When with bitter phlegm you curse
The earth where you breathed first
And wish your day of birth were scratched by He with might.
I knowSame feelings have plagued my adult soul
And the wish for better home to make each day whole
Has been dashed by shameful news,
Where Hope, seeing Hitler, and 94’s Hutus,
Needs to hide its youth to stall the death toll.
But amidst pain, hate and bottled despair rife
There’s the rare love, innocent and hardly grasping to life.
For here, we can give our all
When we choose to keep you from a fall.
We really do it: humble, loving…just like the Lord’s life.
Yes, it’s easier to perceive the weeds in one’s garden
For the pastures beyond gleam in our myopia, hiding their burden.
And seeing that weed can cast a shadow
On all that’s sweet, but cause much ado
About the bitter parts, and it day by day your heart will harden.
Think of the evening breeze on the night grill,
Feeding the flames of a delicious family fish meal.
Think of hitting the unadulterated
Lands of hills where ancient rivers percolated
And happy goats skip, and cattle graze and one can feel
Life whizzing through rustling leaves of dancing old tree or reed,
Playing the music our ancestors learned to read,
Making your lungs touch their purpose,
Dazzling your eyes like a Jabbawockeez pose,
The music we’ve forgotten as we focus on some RSS feed.
Think of the youths wise with tradition re-enacting solemnly
The dances and music handed down from before when Ptolemy
Phrased ancient philosophical data,
To the time of the expansive empire of Sundiatta
Beads stomping the dust frantically in musical poetry.
Picture the pure darkness which crowds the silent night air,
Unveiling the marvellous dotted and scattered there
In the moonlit heavenly canvas,
Watching us from light years past,
And we fascinated by the sparkling magic they share.
So to sum it all up, I know it cannot be perfect,
And sometimes I rant and make massive graffiti of its defects,
But this home my parents chose
Still draws my spirit close,
For the bond is deeper, far deeper than human senses can detect.
(c) Nyonglema

There is a Mouse named Virginia,
who goes out with a Squirrel named Spike,
She went to his house for Christmas,
and brought him a little Squirrel bike
He looked under the tree with excitement,
at what Virginia had brought him that day,
It's seat was shaped like a banana,
that would carry him and Virginia away
This is meant to be a double Limerick...Enjoy all my critter friends...Taz

oo
WW
vvvvvvv
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Adam an Eve went to the market with a bag of Thalers
A round and round A round and round they saw one of plant sellers
Is there a tree of knowledge?
Is there a tree of knowledge?
"Go to urban college then, and pay me two hundred dollars".

A happiness tree is growing in this old guy's back yard
Damn thing makes me giggle even when life's a tub of lard
Thought of cutting it down
Was afraid of a perpetual frown
So it now explains why this dude is always a happy bard

While out on the playground sitting on grass
Teacher asked question of her third grade class
What will you all do
When you finish school?
Little Johnny replied quick as a flash
A tree is what I want to be when I am all grown up
“You cant be a tree” said the teacher stuttering tuts
“Why Not”? he exclaimed
To the teachers disdain
“We both have limbs, trunks and nuts”

My neighbor MrsSpree was on a spending spree
She spent million dollars for a talking tree
The tree was a sludge
It was camouflage
She mucked about in muck absolutely free
My neighbor MrsSpree (C) rajat kanti chakrabarty

Part 1 - Denial set the tone for my transgressions It all began on this day , the day she decided to help with what I’ve come to know as temporary heartbreak She told me it was going to to be okay , but in that brief moment of reassurance I looked into her eyes , trying to find something i had lost ; ”comfort” but She however , was void of this factDays went by and within these days I took it upon myself to dedicate a specific period of my day to continually intoxicate myself with her presence as it provided me with the emotionally healing drug which I had found with her that day and like all drug dealers, She provided this bountifully After a while, addiction became the new name for what I was doing To those around us , it was condemned not only because of its dangers but for the important fact that presented itself as her lover Of course I denied this fact But unfortunately , they had planted the seed of question in my heart and like every other seed , it took its roots and grew into a tree I found myself constantly being tormented with thoughts of whether or not I had feelings for this girl , my supposed helper , had I stupidly fallen in love with her ?These were the questions that ransacked my mind , when suddenly , I was brought back to reality by the sound of her voice, asking me if I was alright I looked at her , I looked into her eyes , and at that very moment , I felt it The ultimate surge of a thousand memories , rushing in and playing themselves scene after scene before my very eyes and then I knew Then I knew ,what I had stepped into and my feet sank , it sank and kept pulling me along with it ; and to my amusement , I did not resist I had let myself fall into this endless abyss , that is called love”I’m in love with you” , I said , and as she turned to reply …

My black cat stares out the front window
On the lookout for neighborhood foes
Then one instance at night
When I had on the light
Her reflection fought back blow for blow
The desert is a sweet hunting ground
My cat, Ace, sneaks about without sound
But, more wily than she
A coyote, hungry
Up a Mulberry, Ace had to bound
I recall my cat’s first Christmas tree
A huge playground was all this could be
Up the tree in a flash
To the floor they did crash
Think she saw eight of her nine lives flee
September 5, 2016

Kate stared out the window as the snow fell,
singing “Frosty the Snowman” very well
She walked to the isthmus,
thinking about Christmas
Kate played “Jingle Bells” with a shiny bell.
She spotted a sled in wanted to ride,
nervous looking ahead as she down slide
“Winter Fairy land” heard playing,
with joy as she was slaying
She enjoyed the sled bells jingle with pride.
Her cousins came over with their new toys
Her mom trimming the Christmas tree with boys
Mom singing “ho ho ho” clear
We were like “no no no” dear
Everyone laughing loud echoes loud noise.
Kate feeling jealous of her cousins gifts
Wonders if Santa Claus got to her lists
Elves stood in her room with bags
Kate face showed the brags
Gloats gifts with joy, noticed in the mists.

Trump Maintains His Sobriety
Trump is well-known for his notoriety
Telling lies and fibs quite a variety
Much stupidity does amass
Poorly relates while passing gas
Yet still maintains his sobriety.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
http://www.poetrysoup.com/poets/top_100_poets_most_poems_all_time.aspx
Should start a Limerick Tree and put it
on other side of entry hall coming into
the library.

There once was an ornament named Al
He loved to hang around with his pal.
To pick up a date
They often left late.
So the gals hung around fem fatale.
From a therapy tree they would listen.
Late Al never knew what he was missin’.
Bi-polar snow man,
Hit Rudolf with flan.
Santa gave Elf the new job of kissin’.
Christmas therapy session soon ended,
The old snowman outdoor remained frosted.
Santa ran out and squealed.
Now, I know I am real.
Snowballs flew through the air; boy exhausted.”
Al and pal alas came for their date.
The gals refused to go; it was late.
When laughter was found,
They all hung around.
Until the Christmas tree met its fate.
12/26/2016

There was once a man who used leaves to cure ,
He was loved for this for his heart is pure ,
“don’t touch me”,-a leaf says
“must you cut us, always?”
perturbed!, he walked off as he came before
He called his friends to tell this weird story ,
Some went with him to the tree of glory ,
to see the leaves talking,
is like a stone walking,
they were surprised as a leaf said “sor..ry!”
DATE:9-17-16
CONTEST:"Leaves Talking" by

Us humans
The dumbest and most genial creatures on Earth
Having eaten from the forbidden tree of knowledge
I could quite easily write a work of genius
Or likewise perform the dumbest act of all
Yes - I could sit here and imagine that
I could do both in fact
Already enacted one super successfully
The other there is still to do
But lifes a bitch
I am not saying which
The knowledge hangs there in mid air
Like nasal fluid urgently needing to reverse so...
( sniff)

I sat under an oak tree in fall
I must have fell asleep I recall
I awoke on a boat
with a frog in my throat
an elephant making a trunk call.
20/10/2017
Contest surreal and daft
Sponsored by Kevin Shaw.