When I was a kid, one of the few things my parents fought about was money. That planted the idea in me that money was scary and sad. I was also taught that it was rude to talk about it and shameful to want it. The career advice I got at home was “Ambition is not a very attractive quality.” It wasn’t until I took business classes in college that I heard people speak openly and unapologetically about wanting to make big piles of money and I found it kind of shocking. It was like talking about your pap smear at a dinner party. It just wasn’t done.

My parents certainly had only good intentions. Neither of them came from wealth (to put it mildly) and they both worked really hard to provide for us. For them, and therefore for me, money was hard to come by and most of their decisions were made around getting money or avoiding running out of money.

I didn’t connect these dots about my underlying limiting beliefs about money (and a bunch of other stuff too) until pretty recently. It was only after many tears were shed in a Heal Your Life intensive workshop. But now that I’ve shone a light onto that particular demon, I’ve changed the way I approach money. I have committed to myself that I will no longer make life decisions based on fear. I affirm that I live an incredibly abundant life and that all my needs are met. I am enough and I have enough.

Creating financial prosperity is really the same process for creating other types of abundance. Try these steps on for size:

1. Identify your own beliefs about money.What did your parents teach you, implicitly or explicitly, about money? What emotions do you feel about money? Are you fearful about not having enough? Do you love having it and spending it? Do you have money and feel guilty about it? Here’s a big one…Do you truly, honestly, really believe that you deserve to have money? Many people don’t. And if you feel unworthy of money, you block it from coming to you. What meaning do you place on money?

2. Watch your words.What you believe about money will inform how you talk about it. “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” “I can’t afford anything.” “Rich people suck.” Any of these sound familiar? Thoughts become things, and this type of thinking focuses on scarcity. Therefore it creates more scarcity. If you think that rich people are a-holes, your subconscious won’t want you to become one. If you think that money is for other people, but not for you, that will be true as well.

3. Don’t compare.There are people in the world who have much more than you do. Most people have much less. That will probably always be true. It’s not a competition and it’s not a zero sum game. There is enough money (and food and love and everything else) in the world for you. Really. It’s important to define success and abundance for your self. Comparing yourself to others is a form of self-abuse.

4. Manage your money intentionally and simply.You want to be smart about money, obviously. Are you spending on things you don’t really care about? Are you denying yourself simple pleasures that you can afford? There’s a balance between spending it frivolously and being miserly with it. Money is energy - it should flow freely to serve your highest good. You want to honor it without obsessing about it. So, more introspection may be needed. What is your intention for your money? How much do you need to live your best life? Is your behavior with your money in alignment with your values and intentions? In other words, do you feel good about how you make it and how you spend it?

4. Focus on your gratitude.You move the direction you’re looking, so let’s look at the good - what you have, as opposed to what’s missing. Gratitude is an incredibly powerful tool in creating joy and abundance. Even your bills! Rather than hating them, try thinking about your bills as symbols of your prosperity. Your mortgage or rent payment is a reminder that you have a warm place to live. Your credit card statement is a reminder that you had the ability to buy the things you need and want. Next time you pay a bill, tell it “thank you” and see how that changes the experience.

5. Affirm what you want.For money to come, you have to be open to receive it. Tell yourself again and again -

I always have what I need. Money serves my highest good. I deserve abundance and I welcome it with gratitude.

Visualize your financial prosperity. Feel how it feels to not worry about money at all. Changing your thoughts is like changing any other habit. It takes time and practice. Keep at it.

I find people’s relationship with money to be a fascinating topic. What are your thoughts and experiences with money? Leave me a comment. And if this strikes a nerve for you, let me know if I can help. meg@demandingjoy.com