Vayikra (Lev. 1:1-5:26)

Fasten your seatbelts, keep your hands completely inside the ride, hold onto your hats and small children. We are about to begin the gripping, chilling, heart pumping action of Leviticus.

Or not.

Yeah, I definitely may be off on that one.

The fact is that splattering blood is chilling in a Hitchcock movie, but somehow it loses it’s gruesome appeal when it’s done by a priest wearing a bath towel around his head and jingle-bells on his pastel-colored robes, and the victim is a defenseless pigeon. Actually, I think that’s a “Far Side” I saw once.

Depending on your guilt (it’s always about guilt, isn’t it?) you can bring goats, sheep, birds (anybody have a copy of Tom Leherer’s “Poisoning Pigeons in the Park”?) or flour (“meal”). The interesting thing is that the flour has to be pure – without leaven. Chametz, the word for leven with which we’ll become constipatingly familiar in a few weeks can also mean “sour”. And the idea was that the leaven soured the offering.

Therefore, limited only by your creativity and the category of food assigned, please bring something which is either pure (unsoured) *OR* something which requires an ingredient which has soured.