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Wednesday, 16 November 2016

Simple Secrets of Great Communicators..

You Can Improve Your Workplace Communication Skills

Would you like to become an excellent communicator? Convincing reasons exist
for why you will want to enhance your ability to communicate effectively.
You will create more opportunities to accomplish your work mission. You will build better and more
rewarding relationships with your co-workers and manager. You will achieve more
goals with less energy and reduce the opportunity for misunderstandings and
cross-purposes.
Great communicators are viewed as successful individuals by co-workers. They
become go-to people in an organization because people equate efficacy with
effective communication. Great communicators contribute more in their
organizations and receive more opportunities for promotion and recognition
in their careers. Are you motivated to learn the secrets of great
communicators? Here are few of them.

Build the relationship first - always

When a great communicator approaches a co-worker, he takes the time to say,
“good morning” and “how’s your day going?” “Did you have a great weekend?” The
effect of the relationship-building forays is incalculable. He sends the
message, each time he communicates, that he cares about the receiver of the
message. He demonstrates that, no matter how busy or overextended he is, he has
time to care about you.

When I worked at William D Goodrich’s Legal Process, I was reminded of this
secret – loudly.

One morning, I answered an international phone call, “Josh
(as this is the name I used to be known in my professional field, AKA Alias),
how can I help you?” My caller’s response was a silent pause, and then he said,
“Hi Josh, how’s your day going? Has it been a good week since we contacted on
Monday?” Something about the way he deliberately slowed our entry into the business
discussion got my attention.

Practicing this behaviour was difficult for me at first because my tendency was
to jump right into the business discussion, but I’ve never regretted that I
took the time to remind myself. My international or internal call greeting
became, “Hi, this is Josh, how can I help you in this wonderful morning/evening?”

Build the relationship first for successful communication. For even more
successful communication, continue to build the relationship in all
interactions in any setting over time. Goodwill has an accumulative effect.

Know What You're Talking About

Obtain the knowledge, insight, and forward thinking ability necessary to
earn the respect of your colleagues for your industry or subject area
expertise. Your co-workers won’t listen if they don’t believe that you bring
expertise to the table. Your successful co-workers spend time with you because
they respect your knowledge and the value that you bring to the conversation.
They won't respect or listen to, let alone be influenced by, individuals who
do not know what they are talking about. So, when you think about secrets of
great communicators, subject matter expertise may head the list.

Listen More Than You Speak

I received feedback recently that a manager held a performance development planning meeting with an employee and
talked 55 minutes of the hour. This is an egregious example of a manager
dominating a discussion, but it serves as a reminder.
Great communicators listen more than they speak. When they speak, they are
frequently asking questions to draw out the knowledge and opinions of their co-workers.

When you allow yourself to listen, you often hear what is not being said. You
can read between the spoken lines to understand the whole context of the other
person’s thinking and needs.

This does not mean that they never speak, but it places the emphasis on using
the knowledge of the team. It affirms for the team members that their opinions
matter and they are valued. It marks you as a great communicator who cares
about what others think.

Focus on Understanding What the Other Person Is Saying

When a colleague is speaking, don’t spend the time preparing your response
in your mind. Instead, ask questions for clarification and to make certain that
you thoroughly understand what the other person is communicating. Focus your
mind on listening and understanding.

If you find yourself (and that little voice in your head) arguing, prepping
your response, or refuting what your colleague is saying, you are not focused
on thoroughly understanding her communication. You have stopped listening and
have refocused the discussion on your needs.

Use a Feedback Loop

Say, "here is what I heard you say" and repeat the gist of the
content of the message that you received from the other person’s communication.
Don’t ascribe meaning to your co-worker’s communication. You are using a feedback loop to check your
understanding and to make sure you shared
meaning.
When you check your understanding, you avoid miscommunication and
misunderstanding. You circumvent hard feelings and protracted explanations
about what your co-worker meant.

Listen to the Nonverbal Communication the Other Person Exhibits

Nonverbal communication is a
powerful voice in any interaction. The voice tonality, body language, and
facial expressions speak more loudly than the verbal communication (sending) or the actual words in many
communication exchanges. Your co-worker’s posture, how he holds the whiteboard
marker, and his distance from you as he speaks are all powerful messengers.

This is why you find that great communicators seek in-person interaction. They
know the amount of information that they lose when they communicate via email,
phone, IM, or texting. The youngest generation at work may not recognize the
importance of talking with co-workers in person.
They are enculturated to use
electronic methods, and this must change. For facts, these methods work. If you
want information that is richer and deeper, and for discussion and exchange,
you seek out your co-workers. Great communicators listen with their eyes.

Watch for Patterns, Inconsistencies, and Consistencies

In any communication, the opportunity for misunderstanding is ever present.
A key indicator that your co-worker is not stating his/her true feelings or
that he/she is going along with the group, rather than agreeing with the
decision, is a combination of factors that you can observe.
You want to watch for patterns (is this how your co-worker typically reacts)
and inconsistencies (is this consistent with what you expect from this person).

You also want to watch for matching words, message, the tone of voice, and body
language. If any of these verbal and nonverbal
communication factors are inconsistent or sending different messages,
communication failure is imminent.
Co-workers tend to listen to the nonverbal communication over the verbal. If
you are coaching an employee who sends contradictory messages, this is a
powerful factor in the misunderstanding that can happen with co-workers. It’s
simple, preventable, and often overlooked as a key factor.

If Something that Another Employee Is Doing or Saying Bothers You, It's
Your Issue

You are the person who is bothered by the action or communication of your co-worker.
His actions or communication may have triggered your reaction, but the response
belongs to you. You will never effectively communicate if you are pointing your
finger and trying to make it your co-worker's issue. He was just trying to
communicate.

You need to take responsibility for owning your own emotional reactions. Use
"I" messages to demonstrate that you know that you
are responsible for the reaction. For example: "You really messed up that
customer interaction" is much less effective and honest than, "I was
upset watching you interact with that customer for these reasons…"You-being a co-worker is rarely effective communication.
You will most likely receive a defensive response which makes the communication
fail. Delivering an honest I message instead is powerful.

Wait to Give Critical or Controversial Feedback

If you are going to say anything critical or controversial, or if
you're angry or emotional, wait 24 hours before you say it, send it, or post it
to see if you still feel that way. Pausing before communicating is an
under-appreciated skill of great communicators. You don’t need to communicate
what you think or feel immediately. In fact, your communication will be more
powerful and thoughtful if you allow the circumstances to marinate for a period
of time.

In this era of immediate and constant communication, thoughtful communication
goes by the wayside. The instantaneous reaction is promoted and reinforced. It
is often ineffective and demeaning. Great communicators collect their thoughts
and develop significant “I messages.”

Open Your Mind to New Ideas

New ideas live or die in their first communication to a person who has power
in an organization. Using the other communication skills presented here, you
can make a new idea flourish or fail in an instant.
Rather than immediately rejecting a new idea, approach, or way of thinking,
pause and consider the possibilities. Consider what might work in your
organization rather than what will fail. Think about the possibility rather
than the impossibilities.

Don’t be guilty of the lethal sins of rejecting, putting down, or diminishing
an idea before it has been articulated and explored. Great communicators listen
for opportunities and pursue them.

All Communication Will Go Better if Your Co-worker Trusts You

It is not enough to be a good listener
and to draw out the other person’s opinions. They will not level with you or
share their real thoughts if they don’t trust you.
You gain trust in your everyday interactions with people when you tell the
truth – even when it’s difficult. When you consistently exhibit integrity and trustworthiness
in your daily interpersonal conversations and actions, you build your ability
to be an excellent communicator.

The co-workers with whom you interact will open up to you. They will be more
likely to problem solve with you without concern for losing, and they won’t
fear to look bad, stupid, or uninformed if they trust you. Do you see the power
of communicating when you have the other party’s trust? It’s amazing.

If you work to enhance your own communication by practicing these skills and
taking these actions, you can become a great communicator. Becoming a great
communicator will enhance your career, make your days at work rewarding and
fulfilling, and reinforce positive relationships with co-workers who love to
work with you. Can it get any better than that?