Pregnant womanA 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman.
Boy: Why do you look so fat?
Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me.
Boy: Is it a good baby?
Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby.
Boy: Then why did you eat it?!

Pee in the showerQ: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

SkeletonQ: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

AdeleQ: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

How were people bornA child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

ClaustrophobicWhat do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.