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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

So, the Queen has come to Canada to visit the distant land she rules and party down with us prarie folk to celebrate the centennials of both Alberta and Saskatchew. This, of course, has re-ignited the old debate of the relavancy of the monarchy to Canada. I've just been kind of daydreaming on this, and I think I figured out how to make it relavant.

See, the whole question of relevancy always comes up because the Queen's way over there in England and just generally doesn't hang out with us. In order to make the monarchy relevant, we need to get more royalty hanging out over here.

What I think the Queen should do is designate one of her kids to be "the Prince of Canada," and boot him over here to live, thus replacing the Governer General. Bam! Now we got the monarchy over here every day, thus brining relevance to our everyday lives.

But then, I started thinking about this a little longer. What would make it even more relevant is if we ditched the House of Windsor altogether, and just got our OWN royal family! Canadian royal blood.

So here's what we do in this scenario. Rather than limit ourselves to just the royalty of England, we put out a job applicaiton to royalty all over the world, offering the job of King/Queen/Emperor/Empress of Canada. I mean, have you ever seen pictures of the royalty of those northern European countries, like Denmark and Norway? They got some hot princesses up there. So, we get one of them to move to Canada and become our ruler. But see, the trick is, we're only using this person for breeding stock. We get them to hook up with a Canadian, and, after a few generations, the family is rooted as Canada's royal family, complete with royal blood!

I will admit, I don't know if there even is a debate. I've never met a die-hard pro-monarchy person, and I've never met a die-hard anti-monarchy person. I think that the average Canadian is indifferent.