If Cassie Clare’s Shadowhunters Ate In The Mean Girls Cafeteria

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2. ROTC Guys

Alec, unlike his sister Isabelle, is noted for his seriousness & complete dedication to his Shadowhunter responsibilities. Clever, loyal & handsome, he’s sure to have signed up for the ROTC – choosing to spend his weekends training & focusing on his future career endeavors rather than trying to make new friends.

3. Preps

Isabelle is a kickass babe, but she also has class. She’s only ever seen in dresses & totally confident in her own skin. She could definitely sit with the Plastics if it weren’t for her snobbish attitude toward mundanes & Downworlders.

4. J.V. Jocks

A sucker for dollhouses & fancy dresses, her weapon of choice is a pink parasol with flowers. Although she has Shadowhunter blood (& therefore totes qualified to sit at the Varsity table), her total disdain for the Shadowhunter lifestyle (& her killer fashion sense) forces her to sit with JVs.

5. Asian Nerds

OK – so technically Simon isn’t Asian. But you definitely don’t have to be Asian to be an Asian nerd. With his intense love for Dungeons & Dragons & manga, the Asian Nerds would totes welcome him with open arms. Or ignore him completely. Which is fine since he could always join the Sexually Active Band Geeks.

6. Cool Asians

Does this even need an explanation? He’s the High Warlock of Brooklyn & throws the sickest parties. A quarter Indonesian, a quarter Dutch & half demon, Magnus has definitely got the looks & the style to hang with the Cool Asians.

7. Varsity Jocks

Arrogant, charming & extremely awesome at slaying demons, Jace is pretty much the jock in the Shadowhunter world. He’s basically Aaron Samuels & Shane Oman combined. Oh – and did we mention his amazing good looks? If Jace sat in front of us in math, we’d pretty much lose our ability to understand limits, too.

8. Unfriendly Black Hotties

Church isn’t actually black. And, okay, he’s actually a blue Persian cat. He knows everything about the Institute (his hair is full of secrets – sort of like Gretchen Wieners) & while friendly to those that he knows, he’s definitely suspicious of strangers. Approach with caution.

10. Girls Who Don’t Eat Anything

A group of male Shadowhunters who live in the Silent City who are obsessed with archiving Shadowhunter history & look mutilated under their robes, do they even have time to eat? Until North Shore starts an emo table, they’ll be sitting with the Girls Who Don’t Eat Anything – too busy with other things to eat.

11. Desperate Wannabes

A former member of The Circle, Hodge is the tutor at the New York Institute & cursed by the Clave to be unable to leave. With the Circle gone & the Clave shunning him, poor old Hodge doesn’t belong to any group – except maybe the Desperate Wannabes.

12. Sexually Active Band Geeks

If anyone belongs at this table, it’s Eric. He’s in a band with Simon (and obvi plays the drums, which is pretty much as cool as musical instruments can be), his current relationship is with Sheila “The Thong” Barbarino & is often referred to as a sexist pig by Clary. If the Sexually Active Band Geeks had to elect a leader, Eric would definitely win the title.

13. The Greatest People You Will Ever Meet

Artsy, unique, loyal & generally awesome, Clary, Jocelyn & Luke are sure to be at the Greatest People You Will Ever Meet table. Both Clary & Jocelyn would totally be down to go to Janis Ian’s art show & Damian would probably perform dramatic monologues in Luke’s bookstore from time to time. How do we make this actually happen?

14. And the worst: Beware of The Plastics

Similar to the Plastics, The Circle is basically the worst. Valentine Morgenstern is an evil dictator with his high-status man candy (or girl candy in this case), “hot” body (obvi) & army of skanks (The Circle).

17. Not Enough?

This post was created by a user and has not been vetted or endorsed by BuzzFeed's editorial staff. It is also not paid advertising. BuzzFeed Community is a place where anyone can post awesome lists and creations. Learn more or post your buzz!