Connecting Life’s Dots •-•

There is a writer whose strap line is ‘Tattooing great things on willing minds’. Her name is Brain Tattoo and she lives up to it. You will agree with me that her style is simple yet profoundly deep. Like tapestry, her well woven words always paint a great ‘bigger picture’ in the end. Happy reading!

I remember waking up last Monday to the news of his death on BBC, and feeling very sad … in the same way that Princess Diana’s death affected me (understandably, she was our modern day Princess, the closest thing to all the fairy tales we read as children).

I am not sure why for I am not particularly techie and do not even aspire to have an i-pad, i-phone or any of those i-gadgets. However, I was left hating cancer, pondering its cruelty and thinking that there must be some way out.

Perhaps, it was because his death came so close to that of Professor Wangari Maathai who had also passed away from some form of cancer. Perhaps it was because her death had awakened an instinct to protect myself. Perhaps it was because my gynae, while doing my annual pap smear, had discussed with me the availability of a vaccine that protects against the virus that causes cervical cancer.

Whatever the reason, I found myself listening yet again to his famous 2005 Stanford Commencement address, “Stay hungry. Stay foolish.”

I had listened to it a couple of years back, and been inspired. But now… in light of his recent death, his words seem to have more gravity, more meaning. It felt like he was speaking to me from beyond the grave and reminding me ever so subtly, that life is not a rehearsal; we only get this one chance to do it. I think that on that day, I could have conquered Mt. Everest if it was the challenge before me, but it wasn’t.

It has been a week since then; a week of pondering his message and trying to fit it into my life.

I’ve gone through a myriad of feelings; jealousy, for people like him who know from very early on what they want to do with their life; envy for the others who have the courage to pursue their dreams; confusion on how to go about living my dream… ; and finally, acceptance that there is no single method of living purposefully. What should matter is whether I am pursuing meaning in my life.

I am reminded of a saying I’ve heard; that life is like a tapestry. From up close, you can only see the threads woven together looking messy but if you stand far away and look at the whole picture, the view will be perfect and meaningful.

Perhaps, while some of us may know the path required to start out on our life’s journey early enough, for the majority of us, the picture may only become clearer when we look back on the criss-crossing of our life’s paths.

In my life so far, I’ve worked in so many sectors that from where am sitting it is hard to see the bigger picture. I’ve been a customer service rep in retail, worked in a bank, been a nurse assistant and physiotherapy assistant, done development work and actually managed to raise funds…etc

Today, I can say that my customer service experience has come in very handy in my job. I don’t know where the rest of the experience will fit in but for right now, I can sincerely say that his death was a reminder to ‘trust that the dots will connect somewhere in the future’.

It was a reminder that whatever I do (so long as am doing it), I must weave that thread to the best of my ability if it is to contribute to the perfect picture.

So… until I can move on to the next thread, colour, pattern; here’s to weaving this thread picture perfectly.