I guess in many ways, we’re doing the same at Empire of the Kop – although with utter transparency and some genuine analysis (we hope)…

The story, in short, claims that we had the monster bid rejected in January, with Chelsea interested about purchasing the young Spain international in the summer as well. The article reckons Asensio would prefer London and a Real Madrid exit having been underused by Zinedine Zidane this term.

But none of this has actually happened. Liverpool have not made a bid worth £131m. It was never rejected. Asensio has told nobody whether he’d prefer Merseyside or London, Klopp or Conte (or Luis Enrique)…

Would EOTK take the 22-year-old at Anfield? With open arms! He’s exceptional, has a an enormous ceiling for improvement and would replace Coutinho’s guile and central creativity immediately.

But we’d quite like Lionel Messi on a loan spell and would probably take David de Gea in goal if our rivals fancied giving him away.

Ironically, Don Balon will now probably take the last sentence (which was a joke, we assure you) and spin their own exclusive from it.