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What would you eat for your last meal? You know, say if some ancient people predicted that the world was going to end on December 21st 2012 and it was well, December 21st 2012? Hmm? Chocolate cake? Lobster? Vodka? For me, it’s a trip down under! Wait, no…that sounds oddly sexual…by down under I mean Australia…not genitalia…get your mind out of the gutter…who me?…my mind isn’t in the gutter…it’s you, you weirdo…

Ooops, all of this genitalia talk made me lose my train of thought. This is the wrong picture. My mom made us stop at the Tractor Supply Store for Chicken Feed before dinner (the amount of camouflage sold here is disturbing, more so because they start with toddler sizes…in pink….Plus side, they do have every single flavor of beef jerkey ever invented…who knew Honey Nutmeg would go well with dried and salted beef?)

My favorite meal (which I have on my Birthday every year…which hopefully I’ll get to do again on January 3rd…if there is a January 3rd…the day’s not over yet) is at…

Here it is folks! My single favorite meal of all time!

We start off with some Wallaby Darned’s (basically a frozen peach daquiri that is like 700 calories but is crazy delicious).

Then we order a sensible side salad with ranch dressing (is it still cool to overuse the word sensible? I’m gonna roll with it anyway)…

Don’t forget the bread and butter…a delicious staple at the OBS.

Then comes the bestest most delicious 2 food items on the Earth…

1. Cheese Fries

2. Bloomin’ Onion!

hallelujah! hallelujah-hallelujah-halleee-lujah!

(that’s the sound of 3 million fat angels wetting their pants over the deliciousness that is these 2 glorious appetizers)

Mmmmm….if we have to be passed onto the after life, or imprisoned by eight legged zombies, (or absolutely nothing happens before midnight tonight) it will be all good knowing that I’ve finished this world as we know it with this glorious meal.

(I cropped out my forehead wrinkle in this shot… something to worry about on December 22nd…botox)

Plus, my fab Mom (who has lost over 50 lbs and is now signing up to run a 10k…woot woot!) received a gift card from her employer yesterday…it’s a sign!

Hey there adoring fans (I mean it, anyone who’s read any part of this out there)!

So here it is, 12:30’ish am December 21st 2012. I’m still s*itting my pants about the space zombies but I’m going to go ahead and say right now that this blog is the best thing I’ve ever done for myself. Whether or not the world ends, I’ve taken the time to get back to being myself (a disgusting weirdo)…being creative…and taking risks. I cannot thank all of you readers enough for supporting me along this production. The love and support (and amazing comments…if the world doesn’t end, take note that you can leave comments…) that I’ve received from you guys has been incredible. I have accomplished so many things in these last 66 days that I never would have made a point to do. I’ve also missed a few…

I never met Tina Fey…

I never saw a live taping of SNL…

And…

I never fell in love…

wait for it….

In all of my pursuits to fall in love… man hunting, online dating, hookery (j/k) , I have yet to find that “special someone” (although I have “made out” with several non-special someones…just to be sure). But guess what? I didn’t need to find a man to fall in love with (gasp!). I (as my friend Rebecca predicted) have fallen in love with…myself. I really don’t mean for that to sound vain. Seriously. I didn’t know I had it in me. All of my life, I hadn’t realized that I could become anything except a cute blonde chorus girl (who makes occasional fart jokes) wishing and hoping that one day a gorgeous prince would come along to complete me. Well, news flash to me…you don’t need anyone to complete you…if you are complete yourself (I know, go choke down a bag of granola why dontcha?! Maybe hug a unicorn?!). I’ve grown so much in my 29.95 years of life and it is 100% thanks to all of the terrific friends and family that I have surrounded myself with (PS: my mom’s computer doesn’t have that spell check thing where there is a squiggly red line under anything you spell wrong so this blog post could be pretty bad…plus I’ve drank a bottle(s) of wind…whatevs, it’s the end of the world!). I could go into further detail about these people these “life changers”, but A: they know who they are. And B: I’m going to spend our last hours calling them 🙂

Here’s a fun shot of me and my (amazing) Dad…just cause I love him.

In conclusion: I am so happy to have lived the life that I’ve been blessed with and to have met the most amazing people that the world has to offer. Thank you all for reading my silly little blog, and I wish you all a “Happy Apocalypse!”