This is such a special post to me because it is written by my dear friend, Katie. Katie and I have been friends since our awkward middle school days and here is my oh-so-awkward proof:

Man. I remember thinking that blue polo shirt was “super nice”. Notice that big, dark spot under my nose? It’s from a zit I picked at too much. Insert embarrassed eye roll here. And who is that boy between us? Oh middle school- you were the worst.

Katie blogs over at And Baby Made 4 and she has oh so graciously helped me get my blogging act together. Especially since I am a hot mess of house projects and detoxing at the moment. Katie is brave, kind, thoughtful and intentional. And my whole life I have loved her joyful heart. I just know you will love her too! Take it away, friend!

A good friend of mine just had a baby. Like two weeks ago. And she’s beautiful and precious and has these squeezable cheeks. I went to see them the day after she was born and as I listened to her labor story, it made me remember both of mine. No one really talks about it, but sometimes (lots of times really, unless you’re a unicorn), giving birth is actually kind of traumatic. There are all these things to be worried about and people putting their hands in places you’d normally never allow and lots of chaos and sweating and if you’re me, lots of vomit. But then eventually you have this little person in your hands. And you have all this love exploding in your chest and also this feeling of great responsibility. Even though birth can be quite messy and terrifying, I believe we are designed to forget most of the icky stuff the minute we stare into that newborn’s face.

Bringing home a baby is one of those strange things in life that maybe happen to you only a couple of times, but you know they’re moments you’ll never quite be able to forget. One minute it’s just you and your spouse, maybe a dog, maybe a sibling. And then all of the world changes in an instant. You’re staring at your newborn in utter disbelief that this human actually came out of your body (yes, this even happens with baby #2 and I suspect others after that). You’re feeling these huge feelings, from overwhelming gratitude and love to a paralyzing fear and self-doubt. You’re not sure how to move on from this point, with your life and your family being forever changed. But you do. Because you are a strong mama. This is what you were meant for.

Looking back on those first few weeks with both of my babies, I remember the complete and debilitating exhaustion. I remember the lonely late night feedings while I let my hubby sleep because he had to work the next day. I remember staring mindlessly at bad crime show reruns as the baby slept during the day because I wanted to do something adult-y. Sure, I fell into a predictable rhythm, and as the weeks went by, it got easier. But the beginning was SO. HARD. And I remember there being a sort of darkness (you can read more about my specific darkness here). However, I was so lucky to have supportive friends and family who brought light into my darkness and helped me to feel strong and confident and back to myself very quickly. So that’s why this really isn’t for the new mamas out there, but for their girlfriends, their families, their tribes. There are so many great ways to be a light to a new mom, and here’s my list of the best and most practical ways to do just that:

1. Pray for them and with them.

You don’t know how much comfort it brought me to just know someone was out there praying specifically for me, especially when I was too tired to even utter a prayer for myself.

2. Take them a meal.

This one is huge. Those first few weeks are like learning how to become human again. And cooking is just a thing that doesn’t usually get done. Also, there’s so much healing that comes with a homemade meal. You know someone planned and prepped and spent time making something they thought you would enjoy. It’s a simple act of kindness, but one that is profound. And bring dessert. Dessert is the best. Here’s one of my go-to take-to-a-friend recipes.

3. Offer to babysit.

Or just come sit with the baby while mom takes a nap. Or work out a system where someone takes all the kids for a few hours so that one mom can go do something for herself. A pedicure, a solo movie, a Starbucks run without kids. It so helps to just get away for a little bit before diving back in. One of my good friends took big sister to the park for an hour one day while the baby napped and I got to enjoy an hour of blissful silence. I was so grateful.

4. Be humble enough to share your own struggles and “fails”.

Especially if you are a mom, don’t hold back the horror stories of saying naughty words at your baby under your breath in the middle of the night after she’s already been up twice. Or the time you burned dinner because you were changing the most epic of poopy diapers. Or the time your 4 year old puked in her carseat and you just took it out and left it in the garage for later because you just couldn’t. Share those stories with the new mom, I promise they will make her feel better and so much less alone in this journey.

5. Be present and LISTEN.

This doesn’t have to be an in-person thing. Some of the best advice I received as a new mom came from friends responding to panicky text messages. To know someone is simply on the other side and is truly listening to what you are saying and taking the time to send back some “you got this” or “I’ve totally been there” or “this too shall pass” is so encouraging.

6. On that note, only offer advice when it is asked for.

Holding your tongue can be a powerful way to support a new mama. (I’m going to be honest here and say I really struggle with this one even though I know it to be true. I am a fixer, so my unsolicited advice is always give in love, but I’m working on it!) She may just need to vent or cry or complain, and she’s allowed. But when she asks for advice, give it to her in the most non-judgmental way possible. And don’t be offended if she doesn’t take it. Remember that we were all new at this once, and we all have the find the right path for our own selves and our babies. And hers might not match yours and that’s okay.

7. And last, if the new mama is breastfeeding…

bake her some of these lactation cookies and tell the husband they are off-limits! If she’s not breastfeeding, make her some cookies anyway, just leave out the yeast and flax and stuff, because cookies are life.

Being a brand-new mama is a season that lasts for such a short time, even though it may seem like forever when you’re in it. And it’s hard. But it gets better and more comfortable. The support and love from family and friends makes it so much easier to tackle. My greatest prayer for all new mamas is that they are surrounded with these kinds of people. Because, yes, the baby is cute, but ultimately caring for that baby is mom and dad’s job. The rest of us need to take care of mama so she can do her thing.

I am a wife and mama of two, an aspiring writer, and a joyful baker. When I’m ignoring the laundry or the endless dish pile, I love to read, snuggle my babies, create delicious things in the kitchen. I’ve known Erica since we were practically babies ourselves and have enjoyed going through this mama journey alongside her. Head over to www.andbabymade4.com to see more of my posts! Thank you so much Erica for having me!

I have mixed emotions about my birthday. Not because I’m getting older, just because I never quite know how to feel. The truth is, I honestly hate being the center of attention. This may come as a shock to those of you who know me- the me that’s always been on stage or telling stories. There’s a side of me that’s really good at being the center of attention, but that doesn’t mean that I actually enjoy it. All that to say- being sung the birthday song is my worst nightmare. I hate it. For a birthday in my young twenties I was attending a missions conference in Waco and somehow an entire, packed hotel lobby started singing Happy Birthday to me. I wanted to die. Like literally run out the door and straight to my death DIE. Instead, I stared at the floor and tried not to cry. IN MY TWENTIES, PEOPLE. As I awkwardly tried to find the song leader in panicked bursts throughout the song, I saw a boy who was just staring at me with wide eyes and mouthed the words, “I’m so sorry” as he shook his head. He got me. So I married him.

There’s another side of me that is totally Jessica Day from New Girl. Confession: I’m a TV junkie. Have you seen that episode where it’s her birthday and she has completely unrealistic expectations? I GET YOU, JESS. I have been blessed/cursed with a crazy vivid imagination and I am a dreamer. I fly high into those dreams and deep, deep, deep into those trenches.

So with all these conflicting thoughts and feelings I just did nothing on my birthday. Nada. I laid low and maybe ate my weight in cinnamon rolls. But a couple years ago I had a friend tell me that they only wanted to do their favorite things on their birthday, which made me think “YASSS”. So that’s what I do now: all my favorite things. This year that means: cinnamon rolls, delicious coffee, going on a walk, buying some planks for our wall planking project, maybe cutting those planks? Taking a nap, not cooking dinner, and time with my family. Ahhhh. Yassss.

I’ve been talking to Ella about having a thankful heart lately. It’s so easy to fall into complacency or comparison whether you’re 5.5 or 32. So this birthday, I wanted to document 32 things that I am overwhelmingly thankful for. I started this practice back when I read A Thousand Gifts and it really is something that is refreshing to the soul. My hope is that 1) as I write this my heart will begin to soar and spill over with joy and gratitude and 2) as you read this, you will be encouraged to do the same. It doesn’t have to be your birthday to write down the things you’re thankful for. You can do 1 or 2 a day and I promise it will start to turn your life into something more beautiful than you thought it could be.

Jesus’s never stopping, never giving up, unbreakable, always and forever love. He loves me. That will always be enough.

Nathan. His smooth cheeks, his patience, the daddy that he is to our girls, the passion he has for me and our family.

Ella. Her sweetness, her empathy and compassion. Her ability to be so “others” focused at such a young age.

Emmy. Her sass. Her spice. Her intense “HEY!’s”. Her humming cuddles.

My pups’ passion for left over eggs.

Cuddles from little things ALL DAY LONG.

My parents & in-laws. Like how did I get so lucky?

My siblings- I went from 2 to 6 and they are such treasures in my life.

My Tribe. The support and love that we have for each other is something I’ve always dreamed of and now I’m living it.

So let’s talk about Christmas Break. Because LORD KNOWS you are as tired as I am if you were stripped of your blessed kid-at-school-time. Don’t get me wrong here- I freaking love my girls. But I noticed that my heart sure has gotten ugly and selfish since Ella started going to school full time, leaving me with a glimpse into the world of actual “me time” during nap time. Now that school has started back up, I feel like I’ve gained a bit of footing back and like I can actually handle life again. Am I an awful mom? Probably.

Anyway, over the break I often found myself saying, “HURRY UP!!! or “FASTER! FASTER!” to my girls. Like did I give births to mutant children who have slowly turned into sloths? It’s the worst. I’m not in denial about it- I seriously struggle to be patient. I would never dare to call myself a patient person. Never. And if you’ve been reading along with me for a while, I’m sure you can understand why this word on going slower is really such a challenge for me. A great and healthy challenge, for sure. But man patience is hard.

I know that Valentine’s Day is still a bit away, but it is Ella’s absolutely favorite holiday. Just the other day she told me, “I just love Valentine’s, mom. Because it is a day when everyone is kind and happy and there are no problems in the whole world.” Luckily she couldn’t see my face when she said that because I had a look of bewilderment written all over me. Like where the heck did she get that nonsense from??? My girl- she’s 5 years old and already a total romantic.

I spent the better part of my twenties as a Jr. High Pastor. Boy did I have the grace for those awkward, hormone filled kids. Over this Christmas break, I’ve been thinking on an exercise I used to do with my Jr. Highers and it’s really been challenging me. I wanted to share it because it’s such a great teaching for kids of any age, but I’ve mostly found it to be great for ME and my selfish and at-times-ugly heart.

I’m sure you’ve read/heard of 1 Corinthians 13- the “Love Chapter”. I mean who hasn’t? It’s become such a widely known verse, recited at every wedding and more. I don’t know about you, but when someone does a teaching on such a common verse (John 3:!6, anyone?) I basically check out, close the tab, stop listening, etc. I just tend to feel like I can’t possibly hear something about it that I haven’t heard before. And that’s why this concept really caught me off guard- it was such a different spin than I’ve ever heard before and it really cut right into this ugly heart of mine.

The verse goes a little something like this:

Now what if we take out all the “love” and “it” words from this verse? It looks a little something like this:

If you are familiar with this verse at all, I’m sure that you can’t read this version without automatically inserting “love” right back into it. It’s like literally impossible for me to not see it in the blanks- I’m just so familiar with it. But here’s the part where it gets interesting:

What if you were to enter YOUR NAME into those blanks?

Yikes… amiright?

When I first did this, my heart sank on the very first line. I couldn’t even write my name into the first blank (____ is patient) because OH MYLANTA I AM NOT.

I decided to show you what my name in this looks like. It’s simply an honest evaluation of me and my heart- not some “beat myself up” thing. Though up against such bold statements it really might seem that way. I’m just gonna close my eyes and plug my ears while you read this.

Man. This post really feels like a downer right now.

Don’t leave though! I have such great news!

There is one name that fits into every one of those blanks seamlessly and perfectly. One name that is sweeter than any name. One name that brings redemption to my short comings and failures. One name that makes me feel at peace and hopeful.

Ah. Man. I love this.

I love this because so many people have this twisted view of who Jesus is lately and it’s the worst. Jesus IS love, friend. I could read this all day every day and never get sick of it. It fills me with hope and peace and reminds me that I can do it. That I can simply ask Jesus to live in my heart, breathe His Spirit into me and give me His strength to do these things when I just can’t even.

And the fact that Jesus is patient? Doesn’t that just quiet your inner insecurities? To know that wherever you are at- Jesus is patient with you? To see that He is not easily angered and keeps NO RECORD of wrongs? Amazing.

I need these reminders in my life. I need to remember who my King is and who He’s asking me to be. I need to be reminded that when I am not enough for my husband, my children or others- He is. I need to write these words in my mind, on my heart and see them on my walls. And I need to live my life- without the heaviness of thinking I can BE all these things- but rather knowing that Jesus is the one who IS all these things. And that amazing Guy lives in me.

Friend, wherever you are today- you can trust Jesus to be the Love you need. I don’t know what that means for you, but I think that you know what it means for you. If you’re lonely- He’s the Love you need. If you’re tired and spent- He’s the Love you need. If you’re at your wit’s end- He is the Love you need. If you think that you just can’t love anymore- He is the Love you need.

So today, this week, this year: let’s actually let Jesus be the Love we so desperately need in our lives. Let’s quiet our busy lives, turn off the distractions, quiet our thoughts and just ask Jesus to come. Come be what I can’t be, Jesus. Come be the Love in me. Come be the Love through me. Come help me love when I just can’t anymore. Come move inside of me and help me be patient when I am just DONE. Come help me to use kind words when I’d rather tear someone apart. Come help me to put others before myself and let go of the list of hurts in my heart. And come help me persevere like only You can.

This is your year, friend. This is your year to shine and grow and love more deeply than you ever have before. You can do it. Because He always comes when we ask Him to.

Craft Time

I am a total Silhouette fan. Like for real- I have used the heck out of my Cameo machine for the past few years and this Christmas I was given a Mint… I can’t even. I love being able to create whatever the heck I want. It’s the bomb dot com. (This isn’t a sponsored post, by the way. I just really freaking love them.) I am dreaming of the day I can justify buying a Curio because then I’d be a legit Silhouette addict.

I’m so aware that not everyone has a cutting machine, so don’t worry- if you’re a non-silhouette haver this craft is still for you. If you do have a cutting machine, I am giving you this free SVG file to make it that much easier. You can also purchase this vinyl decal on my Etsy shoppe for an incredibly easy and sweet project. (<– coming soon!)

If you do have a Silhouette/cutting machine, simply cut this bad boy out of your favorite colored vinyl (or oh my goodness, have you seen these beautiful options??)

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You can even cut this out on cardstock or patterned paper and glue it to a back ground- the sky’s the limit here. Think on what colors you want it in- for example, is it just for Valentine’s Day decor? (So you can get fun pink + red patterns to play with) or are you wanting it up year round? I need to have this reminder up on my walls for more than just Valentine’s Day, so I’m going the simple style it’s in right now.

Next, you’ll need to find a frame you love. This file is meant for an 8x10 (which you can totally change in your Silhouette program), so 8x10 is what I’m going with.

If you have a Silhouette, go ahead and cut this bad boyout. If you don’t have a Silhouette, you can print this onto paper and cut it out with an exacto knife. OR you can just use this little Printable I have here for you. Who has time to cut something out with a tiny knife, anyway?

I’m also cutting one out to put on my mirror as a nice reminder… and probably I should just put one over my kitchen sink, in front of my stove and all the places that I lose my patience. Kidding. Kind of.

Where will you put yours, friend?

Love to you this Valentine’s Day. This is your year!

]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2018/01/17/the-love-you-need-free-svg-printable/feed/69034 Mama Goals That Are Actually Attainable.http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/31/4-mama-goals-that-are-actually-attainable/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/31/4-mama-goals-that-are-actually-attainable/#commentsSun, 31 Dec 2017 06:25:27 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=648I can’t believe that we’re on the cusp of another year. How in the world is it already New Year’s Eve?

I should mention that New Year’s Eve is our 7th wedding anniversary. Here we are- young and in love… and babies. Good Lord we were babies.

And a mere 7 years later…

What a life we’ve lived so far.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this upcoming year lately- the things I want to do, the things I need to do, the things I HAVE to do and I’m feeling either really peaceful or really stressed out about it, depending on when you ask me. I should mention that I freaking hate “New Year’s Resolutions” and want no part in them. Mostly because I’m lazy and they make me feel guilty. There- I said it.

But I am a fan of goals. Goals make me want to work towards them. They make me want to earn the title of “Goal Conquerer” and they make me feel way less judged when I say that I’m setting goals instead of inevitably failing at my resolutions.

So I decided to let you in on my Mama Bear Goals for 2018. If you’d like to join in on these- yay! But if not- this is a judgey pants free zone, girl. You do you. Also, I should note that these are the type of things you aspire to do but don’t beat yourself up over. Because oh MYlanta will I mess up at these. I’m more of a “big picture” gal so this year when I fail at these my mind script will be, “Well crap. That wasn’t ideal. But this is a marathon and I’ve only just begun. Onward.” No beating yourself up in 2018, friend. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

I seriously struggle with slow. Actually it drives me nuts and I hate it. But that’s where I’m at in life right now: slower. If you haven’t read this post on the matter that will clear it all up.

2. Be Present.

Probably based on my problem with speed, my mind is always moving a million miles a minute. I can barely sit still knowing that the dishes need to be put away, along with the laundry and the the floors need to be cleaned and oh yeah I have to feed my children… The List goes on. Endless to-do’s and stressors have been filling my mind as of late and it’s just so dang hard for me to sit and really be present with someone. Has that ever happened to you? It’s become my new norm and I hate it. This year I want to learn to quiet The List, set it aside, and spend time doing what I was created to do: Love others the way He loves me.

3. Listen More.

To everyone, but especially to Jesus. He’s always talking. But there I am, zipping around freaking out about something or another and I’m too frantic to actually ask Him for help. My goal is to be mindful of His love for me and invite Him into all the messes of my life. And friend- there are some MESSES in my LIFE.

4. Come Alive.

This might be my favorite one yet because it sounds the nicest. I’ve realized lately that when I get into a funk the quickest thing to pull me out is to create something. I turn on some of my fave worship songs, lock myself away for a good 10-60 minutes and just make something beautiful. I have a list of projects a mile long that will just bring me so much joy and make me feel alive. So I’m gonna do the heck out of them. And I’m gonna feel God’s smile on me when I do them because I know that He made me to create.

Friend, these goals are attainable because you can give yourself grace this year. You can do maybe 1 this week and that means you won. ALL YOU DO IS WIN, in fact. And if you don’t get around to doing one of these until June- OMG YOU DID IT!!! YOU’RE AMAZING AND TIME IS RELATIVE.

What goals are you setting in 2018? What makes you come alive? I’m dying to know!

Happy New Year from #teampelzel!

xoxo

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]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/31/4-mama-goals-that-are-actually-attainable/feed/9648No More Shame, Dear Eve.http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/20/no-more-shame-dear-eve/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/20/no-more-shame-dear-eve/#commentsWed, 20 Dec 2017 19:43:27 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=640I should let you know that I’m on the verge of ugly crying as I write this.

I came across this picture on Facebook today as I scrolled through my feed. I almost passed right by it but thankfully it caught my eye and now my heart is exploding from all that this painting symbolizes and means to my soul. Look at it again, my friend. Look at Eve’s face. Then Mary’s. And pay special attention to their feet. I’ll get you a tissue.

You can purchase prints of this painting and while you’re at it- how about you buy like 78 for me to hang all over every square inch of my house so I can live and breathe this reminder every day. It is accompanied by this poem that a fellow sister wrote:

O Eve!

My mother, my daughter, life-giving Eve, Do not be ashamed, do not grieve. The former things have passed away, Our God has brought us to a New Day. See, I am with Child, Through whom all will be reconciled. O Eve! My sister, my friend, We will rejoice together Forever Life without end.

Do I even need to write about this? I feel like I could post just this- all day every day and it would breathe freshness into your soul every time.

If I can pick myself up off the floor for a minute to squeak some words out- it will be these: No more shame, dear Eve.

While there is a ton of deep theology we could get into here, I want to focus instead on what this means for you, dear friend. Don’t get me wrong- deep theology feeds and fuels my soul in such a special way, but what are all those historical facts and meanings without letting it touch your soul? We hear a lot about “the Second Adam”- referring to Jesus. There are countless verses that talk about Jesus redeeming the mistakes that Adam made, surrendering His life to the Father in the Garden of Gethsemane. Gardens are where things go down, I guess. And there is beautiful theology wrapped all up in those teachings.

But rarely do we see Eve redeemed.

I’m not going to get all women’s rights on you here- that’s not where I’m going with this. After I had Ella, I wrote about her birth in a post called “Dear Eve”. I’ve long since lost it (cue ugly crying) but all through Ella’s birth I kept thinking of Eve. How scared she must have felt, how terrifying the pain must have been without knowing the joys that would follow with her sweet babe. Adam, wondering if his wife was dying. The regret they must have felt for the choices they made in the garden.

Adam and Eve are by far at the top of my “To Meet In Heaven” list. (Paul? NO THANKS. That guy would make me feel bad about myself, I’m sure of it. Peter is probably number 3. Because that dude is hilarious.) Everything about Adam and Eve’s story intrigues me. I’ve spent hours and hours reading, studying and gleaning all that I can from their time in the garden, wondering what it would have been like to be them.

If you’ve never read The Jesus Storybook Bible, you are missing out friend. It is by far my favorite thing ever. Here’s a video of their story:

The thing is- I get Eve. I SO get her. People are harsh when they speak of her- angry, even. But who on this Earth has never heard that same lie? “Poor you, perhaps God doesn’t want you to be happy.” That lie she believed led her to more heartbreak and shame than she ever thought possible. That one bite, that one slip up- total shame.

How many of us have had the same experience, friend? When I look into Eve’s face, I see my own. The pain, the shame, I’ve felt it too. The hopelessness from being entangled in one of Satan’s lies- it’s almost too much to handle. And yet here we see such a beautiful, peaceful “No more.” I wish this painting could have happened in real life. I wish that Eve could have peered at the redemption of her confusion- seeing that God’s goodness really is bigger and better than any mistake she could make.

Friend, are you Eve today?

Do you have a lie wrapped around you, blocking you from seeing God’s goodness or redemption in your life? Shame is one of the ugliest tools I’ve ever seen Satan use. Shame is sticky. It’s hard to shake off. Once you think you’re rid of it, it likes to pop back up like a sticker you can’t get off your dang finger. And Satan knows this- he’s such a jerk.

But today, this Christmas, this next year and beyond: what if we looked instead at the babe in Mary’s tum instead of the fruit in our hand? What if we dropped our shame and failures and used that hand to reach for Him instead?

Friend, wherever you’re at, whatever season you’re in- there is hope for you this Christmas. There is redemption for your mistakes and healing for those failures that have become wounds. We are loved by a God who never lets us go and never gives up on us. He is making a way for you, dear sister. Where there seems to be no way- He’s already started making a way for you. Where there seems to be no hope- He is bringing the hope TO you. He’s already on His way. There is no shame too big for Jesus. No failure too ugly for Him to redeem. No set back big enough to tear us away from all that He has for us.

Do not fear, dear Eve. There is no more shame for you. A babe has been born in Bethlehem and He will be called “Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father and Prince of Peace.” And that Wonderful Counselor, He can heal you. Our Might God- He’s bigger than any mistake. Our Everlasting Father- His love for you can never be swayed. And The Prince of Peace- He can calm your storm, dear friend.

Christmas seemed distant to me until today. Here, seeing this miracle in a new light, I am reminded of the beauty that Christmas is. The bustling Bethlehem, a filthy stable, the screams of labor, then the Holy Moment– at last. And just like that- He made a way for Eve. For all the pain her choices caused her and her children. For all the regrets, set backs and lies believed- He made a way that Christmas night.

And this Christmas night I will remember- He can and IS making a way for me and every other one of Eve’s daughters. Reach out for Him this Christmas, friend. He’s made a way for you.

xoxo

]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/20/no-more-shame-dear-eve/feed/16405 Tips to Dominate Craft Shows and Pop Up Shopshttp://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/11/5-tips-to-dominate-craft-shows-and-pop-up-shops/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/11/5-tips-to-dominate-craft-shows-and-pop-up-shops/#respondMon, 11 Dec 2017 05:32:30 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=594I’ve been doing craft shows for about 6 years now with my crafting BFF, Marisela. She and I started out as total rookies, but we’ve learned a ton. We both started our Etsy stores before we entered the craft show game and while there are a few similarities there are TONS of differences!

I wanted to share all these things because when I first started there wasn’t a ton of info out there. Some, yes. But not THESE goodies. And friend- I want you to be the Belle of the Ball! Whether you’re just starting to enter craft shows, are starting a pop up shoppe, or are wanting to see your sales boost at your shows- these will help you get there.

1.Your display is everything. EVERYTHING. Maybe even more important than your products themselves.

Yeah, yeah, yeah- that sounds terrible, I know. As an artist, of course you want to put your time and energy into designing your projects. But I have seen so many incredibly talented artists, sitting in their booths with their products on a table… and no one even stops to look at all their hard work. However- if you want to WOW people with those very same products, here are some things to think on.

If you had a store front, what “feel” would you want? There’s a reason why Starbucks is a huge hit- the atmosphere there is FANTASTIC. Comfy, stylish chairs, fun music, the aesthetic is YASSS. As a pop up shoppe you want people to feel your aesthetic the moment they see and walk into your booth. What does that mean, logistically? Decide on your vibe: rustic, modern, vintage, industrial, cottage chic, etc. Look around on Pinterest if you need help.

Once you’ve nailed down your vibe, start looking for display pieces to match. I buy tons of used items from garage sales/thrift stores and make them into what I want. You will need to spend the same amount of time/money on your display items as you do on creating your product. This is a non negotiable. You want your store’s aesthetic to breathe who you are. This attracts the right buyers to your booth/pop up before they ever even see your products.

Don’t forget the details: Packaging, clear pricing, product descriptions. All of it should be well thought through and executed- don’t skimp out here.

Think vertically. Make sure that you have your products at multiple levels. Don’t ever just leave your products on a table. Think shelving, hanging, high and low. We love to hang bunting through our booth- it raises your eye line and looks so fun that it just draws people in.

2. Be Friendly.

This should be a given, right? But oh friend- it is not. So many artists around us make the fatal mistake of quietly sitting, head down, only talking to shoppers if they are spoken first. No! Friend! No! I know it is such a scary thing to put yourself out there but you HAVE TO be brave and outgoing! You can do it! So many times people were about to walk past our booth without looking at our product, but because we said “Hi!” with a smile, they came in and often made a purchase! But make sure that your kindness doesn’t fade if they don’t buy. Be kind and thankful- no matter what.

3. Be Cautious About Custom Orders.

I was originally so desperate for business that I thought “custom” was the way to go. But there are some tricky, unforeseen circumstances that can arise when you do so. If you decide to go for custom orders, make sure your boundaries are clear and that the agreed upon final product is understood completely by both parties.

You could also use PayPal or Etsy readers but I just really love Square the most. It has the easiest to use interface, is fast and easy to set up and I personally think it trumps the others. The simple reader is free and costs a small fee every time it is used but FRIEND- you NEED it!! People just don’t carry cash around like they used to. Having a card reader is a MUST.

5. Offer Multiple Price Points.

If you have a super fun booth everyone is going to want a piece of the pie, but not everyone will come ready to drop serious cash. By offering multiple price points/items, you increase your chance of more sales by appealing to a wider audience. However, don’t take this so far that you underprice your work.

I hope these few tips help in your venture! What other tips are you looking for for your upcoming show? Tell me! I want to know!

xoxo Erica

]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/11/5-tips-to-dominate-craft-shows-and-pop-up-shops/feed/0594Slower. Just Slower.http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/07/slower-just-slower/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/07/slower-just-slower/#commentsThu, 07 Dec 2017 17:01:25 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=585I never wanted to be a stay at home mom.

When we were engaged, Nathan excitedly told me, “And when we have kids I want you to stay at home with them!!” My response was an ugly, “EXCUSE ME? I will NEVER stay at home. I am a CAPABLE and CONFIDENT WORKING woman WITH A MINISTRY and I will NEVER give that up for kids.”

And then I got pregnant with Ella and I was like “Oh. Oh crap. I want to stay home.” It’s safe to say that exactly zero of my life plans have panned out like I thought they would.

That used to make me really angry, and it still does today if it’s kind of sprung on me. But now it’s become such a common thing that I just shrug my shoulders at it and say, “Welp. Another one bites the dust.” Driven, teenage Erica is shaking her head in cruel judgement right now. 30 something Erica is saying “Shut the heck up, kid- you wear weird clothes and need to ditch those judgey pants.”

Young Erica walked fast, talked fast and was a girl on a mission- so get the heck out of her way. Today’s Erica is slower to speak, is more of a marathon runner than a sprinter (ok fine let’s be real- I’m lucky if I can walk quickly) and has had everything that can be shaken in her life shaken the heck up. Young Erica had a plan. Today’s Erica realizes that she can plan her steps but the Lord directs all her ways. PRAISE THE LORD THAT WE GROW UP, FRIEND, AMIRIGHT?

On the note of walking- I come from a family of fast walkers. My mom? Holy crap. That woman can WALK. She zips around here, there and everywhere. It’s incredible. And I USED to be a fast walker… ah, the good old days. Whenever I’m out shopping with my mom these days, my heart starts fluttering when I realize that I can walk fast. It takes me a while to get in the groove of it, but once I do I feel like the freaking Flash.

I should mention that I married the slowest walker on the planet. It’s not that he can’t walk fast, it’s just that he chooses not to. Nathan’s whole self emanates peace and calmness. When we first started dating I was charmed by his peaceful nature and desire to walk slowly, taking it all in. But once we got married it became something we fought about constantly. I’d be like, “Babe. Please. You’re killing me. Can we pick up the pace a little bit?” And he’d respond with a simple, “Why? Why are you always in such a rush? Can’t we just be together?” To which I romantically respond, “NO. WE HAVE TO WALK FAST. I AM LITERALLY DYING INSIDE WALKING THIS SLOW. YOU ARE KILLING ME. KILLING ME SLOWLY WITH YOUR SLOW WALKING SONG.”

Like what the heck is wrong with me that I can’t just slow down for a minute and be with my husband? Slow is just not in my DNA. Not how I was made. Before Nathan, I had a serious speeding problem. I got who knows how many tickets- easily in the teens or twenties. I was always going fast in my little red car. After we’d been married a while, my sister came down to stay with us and she made a comment about my driving. “You’re going like SO SLOW, sister. Ever since you got married you’ve turned into a sloth and it’s freaking me out.” Estrada DNA- it’s fast.

It’s been a busy few weeks around our house. We went to Dallas for Thanksgiving and the following weekend I had my biggest craft show of the year. Now Christmas is only a few weeks away and I’m like WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW. Emmy started walking while we were in Dallas and it’s so freaking adorable because her diaper and chunky thighs make it more of a forward leaning waddle. I can’t even. She’s gotten pretty sturdy on those feet and walks around 24/7 now. All that to say, she’s doing great and I no longer have to coach her or hold her hand walking around- Girl can get wherever she wants. On one hand, I’m sad about this because I know that after her first steps come her first homecoming dance and then marriage. But on the other hand I’m feeling like a little more freedom is coming my way.

At least I did feel that way.

Over the past few days, Em has developed a new favorite thing in life: holding my hand. It’s so sweet, I know. Like for real, painful sweet. She’ll waddle up to me, reach for my hand and then beam like crazy when she can grab my pointer finger and we walk together. She’s visibly giddy when I do this, looking up at me- smiling. Shrieking out with joy, unable to keep her excitement inside. And we walk around together- going nowhere in particular- just holding hands and walking. I don’t really know how I feel about this, if I’m being honest. My Flash DNA tells me that this is the worst thing that could possibly happen to me, my life and any ounce of freedom I have left. I struggle because I don’t want her to get in the habit of only wanting to walk around if I’m with her. And yet my mama heart knows this is not forever.

I was having a introspective kind of day today when this happened again- she reached for my finger as we walked down the hall. All I wanted to do was speed up and get to the kitchen to do who knows what but I heard Jesus whisper to me in that moment, “Slower. Just slower.” Suddenly, my perspective changed. The world stopped turning for a moment, and that moment was hanging there in space- glowing. I looked at my baby girl and drank her all in. Soft, golden hair slowly wafting and shining. Her deep, smokey blue eyes growing wider and then completely squinted from her cheeky smile. She looked up at me and squealed with delight as we walked down our little hallway.

Waddle, waddle, pause. Waddle, waddle, pause.

She’d stop every few feet to just stare at me and smile that toothy, underbite grin. She can walk fast, this girl, but when she’s holding my hand she doesn’t. She just wants to walk by my side.

The weight of this reality is not lost on me. A moment like this- frozen in time- what any mama wouldn’t do to bottle that up and keep it forever. So then why, I ask myself, why does it make me so angry sometimes?

Friend, I need Jesus and I’m not in denial about it. The truth is- I’m always in a rush. And why? I don’t even know. Sometimes I get so frantic in this messy life we live. If my house is a disaster I just start running around yelling and grabbing things, trying to bring the “peaceful clean” back. But there is nothing peaceful about it. I know you’ve never Rage Cleaned before, I’m sure. But oooh honey do I do it at least 8 times a week.

The thing is, nothing ever really gets accomplished when I do this. It’s just sheer madness and there I am at the end of it: with a clean house and I hate everyone. #superhealthymom #momgoals #bestmomever

After my moment frozen in time with Emmy, I just kept hearing that whisper over and over: “Slower. Just slower.”

Ugh. I hate slow.

And yet this life I’m living out- it seems to be stuck in the “slower”. Bending lower, moving slower. Waddle, waddle, pause.

I know that all dreams and good things need a season of slower. A season to form, to breathe, to walk and then run. I’m just so dang impatient sometimes. BFF always tells me that I’m the balloon fighting to fly higher while she’s holding my string, pulling me back down to earth. This could not be more true. I dream and want to DO right away. I see a mess and I NEED to clean it- right away. I hear my baby crying and I get up, make her a whole meal and do a load of laundry while I’m at it- right away. And the truth is I’m really terrible at just BEING.

Mary and Martha are coming to mind right now- those two sisters who hung out with Jesus a lot. There’s a story starting in Luke 10:38 that goes like this:

“As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him.She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said.But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

I used to totally identify with Mary. Young Erica would think, “Martha, you uptight fool, can’t you see that being with Jesus is all that matters? Don’t you know that sitting at His feet is all that we’ll ever need?” And Today’s Erica totally identifies with Martha. Like whoa. All I can think is, “Mary, you lazy jerk, get the heck up and help me already. And Jesus- what the heck? If you cared about me at all you’d make this fool realize she’s being THE ACTUAL WORST and that loving her sister means HELPING her sister.”

(Can you tell that I’m an Acts-of-Service-Love-Language kind of gal?)

Sometimes I really hate Mary, but with this word of “becoming slower” I’m starting to think that maybe I should BE Mary. To walk slowly with my husband, making him my main focus and not our errands. To let Emmy grab my finger more and slowly lead me wherever she wants to go. To say yes when Ella asks if we can “have a chat on the porch” and really BE WITH HER, ya know? Bending lower, listening deeper, being quieter. Taking it all in.

This Christmas season that’s upon us, I don’t want to miss it. I feel like I usually rush all around the Stable. I see all the poop and the hay and I’m like, “MARY. GIRL. You’re bleeding all over the place and like why did you choose that bale of hay to sit on? Let me get you a towel and a freaking midwife. And Joseph- get this woman a SNACK for crying out loud- she just pushed an ACTUAL HUMAN out of her HooHa in a DISGUSTING STABLE so you better get up and help me pick this place UP.” I run around picking everything up for everyone, buying gifts left and right, accepting the wise men as they come and thinking “Don’t you dare sneeze on that baby, when was the last time you washed your dang hands?” and tending all the livestock because by this time they’ve realized that I’m their only hope and friend in this world.

But I never really stop and look at Jesus.

I never let the holy moment come. I rush around making sure everyone else has what they need, when in reality what my family needs is my heart: fixed on the King. Instead of bending low, listening in and quieting my to do list I choose the chaos instead. Why, friend?

This year, my Stable goal is to be slower. To recognize the holy moments in front of me. To see the newborn babe, to touch His face. To remember all the promises of hope and restoration that God has made and realize that there they are: right in front of me, in Him. To hold the King of Kings, so tiny, in my arms? The thought makes me weak. To know that all God has been planning and working on for His kids is here- in this moment- in a dirty, messy place.

Maybe my dirty, messy place can be the space for a holy moment too. Maybe I can look at my girls this Christmas and think, “There they are- my promised girls- He gave them to me.” Maybe I can really kneel into the manger, smell the hay, and remember that Jesus came into messes and “messes” are where He lives. Oh Jesus, will you come live in this mess? Here?

Friend, my heart is for you this Christmas. Wherever you’re at- whatever mess you’re in. Whether you’re a slow walker or a fast walker, my dream for you this Christmas is that you would bend lower, listen deeper and be quieter. If we see each other running around the Stable freaking out, let’s remind each other of this. Let’s stop the chaos together.

I’ll take your hand as we walk together to the manger. We’ll see His face. We’ll let the holy moment come. We’ll turn our hearts towards the King and our families will never be the same.

Slower, friend. Just slower.

SaveSave

]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/12/07/slower-just-slower/feed/6585Then Sings My Soulhttp://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/11/27/then-sings-my-soul/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/11/27/then-sings-my-soul/#commentsMon, 27 Nov 2017 15:21:45 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=574It’s Thanksgiving today and our family is in Dallas celebrating with my in-laws.We’re rarely all together since we’re now spread across the country so this is a special treat.We drove through the night to get here so that our youngest, Emmy, might not scream her head off the entire 10 hours of our drive.It kind of worked… kind of.I mean, is there such a thing as a peaceful road trip when you have a teething sassy pants on your hands?No.No there is not.

I’m a sleeper and I make no apologies about it- I love sleep like a fat kid loves cake.I think about sleep ALL DAY LONG.I long for it and I fantasize about the coziness of my bed.Unfortunately, when I became a mom sleep and I broke up and have had an on again off again relationship ever since.It’s exhausting.I’m like Sleep- listen- we can do this.We can figure it out, you and me.Don’t keep leaving me and returning for rare one night stands.Just stay with me forever and we’ll be so happy together.

Unfortunately Sleep is an unfaithful lover in my life.

I bring all this up to say that driving through the night was probably Sleep’s last straw in our relationship.Goodbye, dear sweet friend- parting is such sweet sorrow.We kind of tried to catch up once we got here, but seriously- I’m a Hot Mess Express without sleep and it’s totes obvious.

This season of motherhood has left me WORN OUT more than I knew I could be.It’s better than it was just 8 months ago but losing out on this much sleep year after year has morphed me into a completely different person.When I actually get good rest I feel like I’ve put on my old, chipper self like it was a pair of comfy jeans.And after stints of no sleep I feel like a busted can of biscuits when I try squeezing back into my “self” and eventually I just give up and sit there like a freaking zombie.

Some people are just drowsy or lethargic when they get tired but not me- I’m like all out irate and a monster.I’m raw and I cry a lot and it only takes one little thing to set me off into a fit of rage.Kind of like the toddler I’m currently raising.Cool.Cool cool cool.

I’ve learned something in the midst of that, though- that Jesus always meets you in your rawness.It seems counterintuitive for Him to do that, like shouldn’t you be in a right- or at least coherent- state of mind to hear His voice and understand what He’s saying to you?That’s what I’d prefer.I’d love to be able to hear Him right when I want to so I could write it down and really get a minute to process through it.Really soak it up and let it sink in.But that is not my life.Instead, Jesus speaks to me at the moments when I’m boarding the Hot Mess Express with a one way ticket to Anywherebuthere.

We were having a family devotion time this morning and I remembered something beautiful- we’ve been given a spirit, inside our little bodies, that can commune with the Living God.When we’re tired or angry or lacking, the Holy Spirit Himself can speak to our spirits and stop our bodies in their tracks.

During our devotion, a song started playing through my mind and I couldn’t get it to stop.The funny thing is I don’t even like this song.I mean I do, I guess, I just can’t sing it to save my life.The beginning goes a little something like this:

It’s as if the writer has looked upon all that God has made and his soul just begins to sing to Him.Like it’s a reaction he can’t even control.I just love that.

When I think about my life, there have been definite seasons when my heart’s response is similar.Situations that have taken me out of my struggle and brought such profound beauty to God’s love for me.There have also been seasons that seem quite the opposite- where I’m struggling to even pray let alone burst out in song.

I find myself in the latter season much more than the first.Especially in this season of motherhood where my “time with the Lord” is few and far between and never looks the way it used to.Before I was married I remember a time when I could not get enough of the Word.I was reading my Bible for 2+ hours every morning and just soaking it all up.And if I’m being truly candid right now, I can’t tell you the last time I read more than a paragraph in my Bible let alone a whole chapter.

I knew back then that there would be a season when I couldn’t read my Bible for hours a day.And ta da- here I am.I harvested so many verses and hid them away in my heart.And because of God’s goodness, He reminds me of them now when I need them most.As a former legalistic teenager this concept seems lazy.But as a mama with some years under her belt, I now understand how kind Jesus really is.

It’s not like it’s a surprise to Him that I never sleep.He knows.He sees me running around frantically all day and you know what?I truly don’t believe that God is a guilt-tripper.There.I said it.There is so much guilt tripping in the Christian community sometimes and I’m just over it.Does God love us and want to spend time with us?Yes.Does He offer us life, wisdom and joy through His Word?Absolutely.Does He desire complete communion with us everyday?Definitely.But does He guilt you into it time and time again? Nope.Not a chance, sister.

Now I definitely believe that God calls out to us, longing for our hearts to turn towards Him and spend time with Him.That’s who He is- the Lover of Our Souls.After I had Ella, I struggled with what my relationship with the Lord looked like.It had changed somehow, but I wasn’t really sure how or if that was ok.What I learned was this: there’s spending specific time with Lord and there’s inviting the Lord into your whole day.

Can you do both at the same time? Sure.But we shouldn’t limit God’s presence and voice to our allotted 30 minutes with Him.Instead, the bible calls us to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17).And as a mama bear- this verse could not be sweeter.I need Jesus, friends, like FOR REAL.I need Him when I am a grump in the mornings.I need Him when my kids won’t stop fighting or whining.I need Him when it’s dinner time and I’d rather die than cook a meal.And OH MYLANTA DO I NEED HIM AT BEDTIME.

While I haven’t been great at reading the Word in this season, I am hearing God’s voice more than ever before.I talk to Him a lot throughout the day, in a sentence or two here and there.And finally, I think I’m starting to understand how your soul can just break out in song to God.

I’ll be cleaning our ever-messy house when I feel my soul start to rise up and tell me to change my negative mind.I hear my soul sing when Emmy kisses my cheek after screaming for 2 hours at 3am; reminding me of God’s answer to my desperate plea for her.I hear my soul proclaim God’s faithfulness in my marriage when I’d rather be frustrated instead.Our spirits, designed completely BY God FOR God to use as an instrument of communication to us, His kids.Amazing.

What does your relationship with Jesus look like right now, friend?Is it boxed up- only letting Him into one area?Or is it permeated with His love and voice?Our spirit is just like a muscle- if we work it out, it grows.If we ignore it, it fades. Maybe you’ve never heard the voice of God before because you’ve never nourished your spirit.Well friend, it’s time.It’s time to open your heart to Him, to ask Him to join you in every part of your day.It’s time to let Him out of the box you’ve kept Him in and ask Him to seep into every inch of your life.It takes practice, for sure.But little by little, inch by inch, when we let Him into our lives He grows our spirits.When our spirits grow, we can hear Him more clearly.And when we can hear Him more clearly, we can hear our souls begin to sing to Him– our Creator and our Friend.

It’s time, friend.It’s time to trust Him with an area you’ve never trusted Him with before.It’s time to dive in and seek Him more than you ever have before.It’s time to give up your control and ask Him to be the boss instead.

And then you’ll feel it: the faint but distinct flutter in your soul- the Living God speaking to you through the spirit He gave you.Stretch out your hand, take His.Dive in.And sing, soul.Sing!

The hard part about this, though, is that I really love a clean house. I just don’t want to be the one to clean it. I often find myself fantasizing about my children picking up all their shoes and a little fairy dusting every last surface in my house right after she’s put away my laundry and deep cleaned my carpets. This has been especially true lately because Emmy is nearly 15 months old and literally all she does ALL DAY LONG is move crap around my house. Ella and I were trying to quietly walk down our hallway yesterday and kept tripping on/kicking all these rattles and snack cups. It’s the worst.

Growing up, people just dropped by our house without warning. I thought this was totally normal until Nathan and I got married. These days, the thought of someone dropping by unannounced makes my stomach drop to my ankles because our house is YIKES, people. Our life group had a season about two years ago where we split the couples for “Guy’s Night” and “Girl’s Night”. We (the girls) were all at a Fro Yo place when Nathan sent me a text about how the guys’ plans fell through… so he invited them all to our house. My initial response was, “Wow! My introvert husband is being so hospitable!!” Followed immediately by “OMG BUT NO. OUR HOUSE IS A WRECK AND I’M SO EMBARRASSED AND DID YOU PUT THE LAUNDRY AWAY? DID YOU CLEAN MY CRAFT SUPPLIES OFF THE COUCH? I THINK MY UNDERWEAR IS SITTING ON THE KITCHEN TABLE.”

I tried to hide my terror as all the wives started getting texts about their hubbies heading to my house. There was a moment of silence. And then everyone looked up, wide eyed and said “I would never be ok with this happening at my house!!” As everyone started pouring out stories of how embarrassed they’d be by their dirty floors and dusty mantles my heart calmed a bit. I thought to myself, “Well, at least they’re all dads and they know how messy a house with kids can get.”

The next day my walking BFF, Meghan, and I were out for our bi-weekly walk and we were recapping the night’s events. She said that after her hubby saw our house in it’s prime time mess, he felt better about theirs. Usually, when we have social events in our group they are planned and houses are immaculately cleaned. So when you arrive as a guest you end up thinking, “What a clean, beautiful home they have.” And while we know that kids make messes, it certainly doesn’t help you stop the comparisons. I so often think, “What’s wrong with me and my family that we can’t get our freaking kitchen clean? Why can’t we get our shoes picked up? And when will the clutter end?”

While I was initially embarrassed that our messy house made him feel better about his, I thought to myself, “Why?” What a freeing thing to be released from the expectation that your 3 year old is going to be tidy. I decided that every time those feelings of embarrassment popped up I was going to shut them up with this new thought: “I gave them a gift“. A gift of freedom. A gift of knowing that other families are like REALLY messy too. A gift of lifting the burden of perfection and comparison.

Years ago, I read Table Life by Joanne Thompson. In it, she talks about how we need to invite people into our messes, because that’s when they can feel like part of the family. She puts emphasis on leaving something undone and purposely not having dinner finished so your guests can help prepare the meal. And my favorite part: you don’t want people to leave your house feeling good about you, you want them to leave your house feeling good about themselves.

Yeah. Yeah that’s exactly what I want. And while I pretend like I can make that happen by planning a 6 course meal with absolutely no hiccups along the way- that’s just not real life.

Over the summer we threw Ella her 5th birthday party. We decided on a Unicorn theme (ahem, I decided and manipulated the heck out of her to get what I wanted) and I initially believed that I would throw a party of Epic Pinterest Proportions. But by the time the party actually came it was anything but epic. Real life, amiright? I gave up and just thought, “Whatever, she’s getting some presents and has rainbow clothes so we’ll be fine.” Instead of the crazy Pinterest-unicorn-everything I could have made, I decided to settle for quiche and donuts and call it good. We do morning parties around here because all the little kids are still happy and our swamp cooler is nicer to people when it’s not blazing hot yet. So I woke up, actually felt relaxed and popped the quiche in the oven. I told Nathan something along the lines of, “Wow! We’ve really done it! Planned and executed a peaceful kid party!”

About 15 minutes before everyone started arriving, the oven timer went off and I opened the oven to find BURNT QUICHE. ALL OF IT. BURNT. My main dish- totally unusable. Over 40 people would be arriving at my house in a matter of minutes. And I lost my freaking mind. I started frantically running around, screaming things and nearly ended up in a pile of tears on the floor. Nathan and I brainstormed about what we could do cheaply and fast and we landed on making breakfast burritos. (We always have around 10 dozen eggs on hand. Nathan’s an egg guy. More on that another time.)

As I pulled out ingredients, everyone started to arrive. When I told the mama bears about what had happened they all just jumped in and started making food in my kitchen. And I let them. Meghan cooked the eggs, Jess wrapped burritos, Danielle watched the kiddos and I made coffee. Jess leaned in and whispered, “Erica, I would have cried. You’re doing so well.”

I have the best tribe.

Something that would have destroyed me if I was trying to “have it all together” instead became a total bonding experience. If I had let my pride in and said, “No- I don’t need help, I’ll figure it out”, it would have resulted in me feeling embarrassed and my guests awkwardly watching me freak out. No bueno. Instead, I had no choice but to let them in and accept their help. And my soul is healthier because of it.

What is it about needing help that makes us feel so… ugh? I like to blame it on judgey moms. But the truth is, it’s just my own insecurities and feeling like I’m not enough. Friend, there are so many things out there that are making you feel way more insecure than you need to. Maybe it’s Pinterest. Maybe it’s that mom on facebook who can’t stop bragging about how freaking awesome her life is. Maybe it’s just this voice in your head reminding you of how not-awesome your life is. Whatever it is- shake it off.

Like, for real. Just stop. Don’t be that mom. Don’t be that friend. Instead of trying to always look like you have everything together, give people the gift of grace instead. I’m sure i don’t need to tell you this, but the truth about life is that it can get so ugly and hard. There are seasons of joy and there are seasons of such intense pain that I cringe just remembering mine. What saved me the most in those seasons of life weren’t the moments I actually “had everything together”. No way. What saved me in those seasons were the people in my life who were honest with me. The people who let me into their messy homes. The people who opened up to me about that struggle in their life, in their marriage, in their parenting journey. The women who told me about their major mom fail the night before. The wives who told me about their “did I really just do this?” freak out on their honeymoon. The friends who told me that sometimes they didn’t really believe that God was good.

Be that friend to someone, girl.

Be the friend who gives the gift of relief. Be the friend who extends grace and an embarrassing story of your own. Be the friend who builds up the people around you instead of tearing them down by only revealing the “perfect” areas of your life. And when someone gives you the same gift in return- say thanks.

In order to build a healthy tribe around you, it takes vulnerability. It takes letting them into your messy home and intentionally not cleaning up while they’re there. It takes bravery to tell your most vulnerable stories to empower the women around you. And sometimes it takes burning all the quiche at your daughter’s unicorn party.

We’re better together, dear friend. We’re better when we’re 100% us. We’re better when we’re honest and so freaking beautiful when we are a hot mess of LIFE.

Give someone that gift today. Give them the gift that you so desperately need yourself. Give and give and give some more. And when a friend offers to give you the gift you need- don’t you dare turn her down. Let people help you, friend. Let them see you when you’re weak. And take their hand as they guide you to Jesus when you can’t get there yourself.

We really do need each other.

Don’t hold back.

Give the gift.

Craft Time

I have to confess- I probably have way too many words on my walls. #sorrynotsorry. As a stay at home Mama Bear, I am in my house ALL THE FREAKING TIME. And I’ve found that I just really need visual reminders of what God is doing in me, through me and around me. And the other problem is that I like change WAY TOO MUCH. Nathan has to give me time stipulations for things- like he’ll agree to a big house change as long as I’ll leave it up for x-amount of time. Years ago he told me I could only repaint if I left it on the walls for two years. What kind of insane person can agree to something that long term??? I’m kidding. Kind of.

Anyhow- getting to change out simple things- like words on my walls- helps me to keep my time commitments to my husband. And I thought I would give you a super simple tutorial on how to do basic calligraphy. Ok fine- it’s more of “tips for chalk calligraphy” because who do I think I am!? I’m no expert here. Just a bored mom with commitment issues.

What you’ll need:

Chalkboard Paper. I get mine from Hobby Lobby and it’s a cheaper way to practice your chalking. If you hate it you can just get a new sheet and not feel wasteful. You could also just practice on a chalkboard, but unless that chalkboard is primed and your markers are superb you will have to repaint that chalkboard and take it from me- it’s just easier to use chalk paper.

Chalk markers. Again, Hobby Lobby is my BFF. I just get their chalk markers and they are a timeless classic. Also pictured below are a chalk pencil and a chalk crayon. Both are great options when you get a little more confidence under your belt. But for beginners I really recommend a chalk marker. They’re erasable if you make a mistake and they’re so easy to use.

Q-tips and water. When you mess up (because you will. And that’s totes ok.), I’ve found it’s easiest to dip a q-tip in water, ring it out a bit and then erase your mistakes with it. It will take a little more clean up work than you’re imagining this way, but it really is the safest way to hide the fact that you’re a human who makes mistakes.

First things first- decide which font you want to use. I usually scour Pinterest for something I like and then practice copying it. Copying will be your best friend as you learn to chalk. You can get fancy and creative after you’ve got a grip on it all- but to start just flat out copy someone else’s work. I can’t tell you how many things I copied until I was brave enough to make designs on my own.

DaFont.com is a great resource for this as well. You can find a font you like, click on it and then type what you want to write in the “custom preview” box. It will show you your words in that font and ta da! just copy the heck out of it.

I decided to go for a simple calligraphy font here. Notice how this picture is just the “bare bones font”. No thick lines yet, and it’s definitely not perfect. But it doesn’t have to be because the next step is where you hide everything.

So next what you want to do is make the “down” lines thicker. I’ve outlined where I want to do this as you’ll see below. The “down lines” are exactly what they sound like- wherever your marker stroke went down as you were writing it. I’ve found that if you decide on a simple rule like that it’ll help your font look uniform and intentional. Go ahead and thicken all your “down lines” with an initial outline and then start filling them in.

Sometimes you may have to do two coats of marker to get what you want. Sometimes not. Just feel it out.

Notice how the bottom outline of “grace” is nowhere near perfect. This is why I recommend chalk markers because they really do hide a multitude of sin, people.

After you’ve filled them all it, hang it up, step back and study your work. Are all the “down lines” matching thicknesses? How’s your spacing? I tend to want a big difference between the width of my down lines and my skinny lines. So I try to never thicken up the skinny parts- makes for a more dramatic/calligraphy feel!

Bottom line to chalking: practice, practice, practice and practice some more. You seriously can’t practice enough. The more you do it the more you’ll feel confident and confidence is key.

What words will you put on your walls?

xoxo Erica

]]>http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/11/03/give-the-gift-of-grace-calligraphy-tutorial/feed/4473Tell Their Storyhttp://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/10/17/tell-their-story/
http://www.ericapelzel.com/2017/10/17/tell-their-story/#respondTue, 17 Oct 2017 20:15:54 +0000http://www.ericapelzel.com/?p=413I’m not gonna lie friends, I am OBSESSED with Hamilton.It’s ridiculous.Nathan was crazy into it for the longest time and I was like “yeah, uh-huh, whatever”.BUT NOW I GET HIM.

I’m also a bawling mess through it.I can’t listen to most of the second act.The other day I was driving to pick Ella up from school and the little “shuffle” button was active on my music app.The last song, “Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story” came on and I just instantly started crying because I remembered all the pain at the end of this poor guy’s life.Even typing- I’m a teary mess.It’s embarrassing.

I’ve been thinking a lot about stories lately.I’ve even started talking about my life in “chapters” and seeing this season as mid-story instead of the end (like it can feel like sometimes).

Yesterday I was changing Emmy’s diaper when all of a sudden I just started telling her her story.I’m not even sure why- it was just like it erupted out of me.Usually what erupts out of me while changing her diaper is a lot of anger and “No ma’am”’s because she’s in that stage where she flips over and grabs her poopy booty and screams during diaper changes.It’s awesome.

But all of a sudden- instead of my normal “no”’s came:

“Emmelina, let me tell you who you are.You are my miracle baby.That’s right, baby girl.You are a miracle.Your sister… Jesus surprised us with her because we didn’t even know we needed her yet.But Jesus said, “oh yes you do!You need this baby girl!” So He gave us Ella.Then Ella made us realize that we could love lots of babies, and that’s when we started to want you.We prayed and prayed for you to come, but we had to wait a really long time.Before you came, people told us that you would be a fighter and that you would see God’s face!And then finally- there you were!And we were so thankful.You’ve had a really hard first year, baby girl.But that doesn’t mean that you aren’t a miracle.And it doesn’t mean that the years ahead will be terrible.It just means that what was sewn with tears will be harvested with abounding joy.You are a fighter.You are an overcomer.You are a miracle, my Emmelina Clementine.And you will see the face of God.”

As I spoke these words over her, she grew calm and quiet.She looked up at me, studying my mouth as I poured love on her with my words.Do I think she knows what I said?No.But I think her spirit could feel it.

We need reminders of our story, friend.Someone to tell it back to us in a more lovely way than our broken mind can.

The truth is- some days I wonder why I wanted a second baby so badly.Don’t get me wrong here- I love that girl fiercely.But man is my life harder now.It’s true what they say- two kids isn’t double the work, it’s exponentially more work than you could imagine.And while it’s exponentially more love and joy as well- my mind doesn’t always go there when I’m spiraling into a bad day.All it takes to start down that spiral is one bad night.Or one broken belonging.Or a thousand of those all mashed together in what seems to be an unending mess.Motherhood is so messy, isn’t it?And my oh my the hormones DO NOT HELP ONE BIT.

I have enormous mom guilt.After fighting so hard for Emmy, she has been so difficult in so many ways.And it’s easy to believe the voice of the enemy over everything else when you haven’t slept for a year.

I’m not proud of this and I wish it never got to that point, but the trenches of motherhood can be deep, friend.And Satan- he doesn’t play fair.The Bible tells us that his main jobs are to steal, kill and destroy.And yup- I’d say that too often I’ve given him the authority to do it in my life.He has stolen so much of my joy.He has killed off my hope time and time again.And there are so many days when I am convinced that my life has been destroyed by the choices I’ve made and people I’ve created.

And I’m freaking sick of that guy.

What I love about Jesus is that He was and is a story teller.Thousands of people gathered around Him to hear Him tell stories.He knew that the human heart found stories irresistible- He made them that way.And when I imagine Him telling the parable of the sower or talents, I picture the crowd’s eyes locked on Him and His mouth as He poured love on them with His words.

What story are you telling yourself today?Is it one of hope, courage and perseverance?Or is it the one I too often rehearse in my mind, “It’s not getting better”, “They don’t care about me”, “Things will never change…”All too often I find myself agreeing with these lies without even noticing that that’s what I’m doing.But not today.Today I take captive my thoughts and the attitude of my heart.Today I say no to hopelessness and ungratefulness.And today I say yes to Jesus’ never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love.

I’m done listening to the wrong story, friend.I’m done believing the lies over the blatant truth.And GOOD LORD I will not allow Satan to tell my girls their story.

My girls need ME to tell them their story.They need me to be the bridge to Jesus, reaching my hand out to them and showing them the way.They need to hear how they are wanted, destined and so deeply loved.And how can I do this if I am not believing the same for myself?

The buck stops with me, Satan.You’re a puny fool and we’re done with you here.My girls will rise up with power and fierce hope.They will look fear in the face and laugh their heads off at it.You’ve fought the battle in your sneaky little ways here- but the victory belongs to the Lord.I will listen to Jesus alone.I will tell my girls their story, especially when I’m tired and when I’d rather scream instead.I will let the Holy Spirit reign in this house and in this heart.And the story that has been written from the beginning of time- it will resonate in this home louder than any lie ever could.

This is our story.The anthem we scream on the mountaintop and in the valley, the Author of OUR story: He is good.