My Decade in Review

I can’t say that this has been the best year, bookended as it was by job loss and a miscarriage, with the deaths of two uncles and a high school friend sandwiched in between. There have been high points — I finally started a business that is well on its way to being successful; I finally finished the first draft of a novel I’ve been trying to write since 2004, and another novella besides; and I got to work at home all year, which has been a blessing. Otherwise, it’s mostly been a year of loss, and coping, and struggling to stay afloat, both financially and emotionally, and I’m ready for it to be over with. I don’t think I realized just how ready until I started writing this.

So let’s review the decade instead, shall we?

Overall, on a personal level, I’d call the Oughts a win, full of milestones on the highway of life: I turned 30, finished my degree, met the love of my life, got married, and became a homeowner, in that order. I know most people have that stuff over and done with by the time they’re 30, but I’ve always been a late bloomer.

On the downside, there was that falling out I had with a group of close-knit friends, and that still makes me sad, but I think I came out of it a better person than I was going in. I went through a lot of jobs, and had a couple of failed attempts to start a home business, but all of those taught me new skills. I managed to go all decade without getting published (save for a short article I sold to a Canadian magazine at the very start of 2000, which I was sure was going to launch me into a decade of publication and pro-writing), but I’m earning enough income writing online that I still qualify as a professional writer, and hey, I finished that novel, so now I actually have something to sell, which gives me a goal for the new year.

I also went through a lot of soul-searching and questioning regarding my faith, and the things I was taught about who God is and how He works and what He wants from me. As a result, my faith is stronger, my understanding of and trust in God is deeper, and I have a firm grasp of my identity in Christ, all of which have allowed me to weather the storm that has been this decade’s final year with a sense of peace and steadfast hope.

In short, I became a grownup. I don’t think that’s a bad way to spend a decade.

Here’s hoping this next decade is full of God’s grace and blessings. ?
I know it will be. I just hope we pay attention enough to notice them. Getting to know you was one of the biggest blessings of the last decade, dear Sunny. Happy new year to you, my friend.

It was quite the decade for the both of us. I spent it with two teens. Exciting times, indeed.
I remember your Internet fallout. It happened shortly after I’d experienced the same in real life. These things become so wicked and crushing. It seems once they start, there is no stopping them until they steam roller over the object of derision. I pray I will never be part of that pack mentality that delights in circling the prey looking for openings to dart in to do damage while the rest of the pack howls in delight. Even so, I grew from my experience with the wolves; hopefully, I’m a better person for it.
I’m glad to leave 2009 behind. May 2010 be a kinder one.

Falling out with friends is never fun, and I’m sorry you went through that, too. As for the Fandomwank fallout, I kind of view that as karma for all of the times I was on the torch-carrying end of the FW mob. I had no idea how soul-crushing and damaging that could be until I ended up on the bottom of the dogpile. I look back at my FW participation with deep shame and regret.
What really hurt, though, was the participation of my supposed friends, who were some of the first to rush to public judgment against me. I can see why some people might have thought asking for my novel to be crowd-funded was in poor taste, even though today it’s common practice for indie writers and artists and a lot more widely accepted. But I’m still confused as to how it was construed as asking to be paid to write fan fiction. That was something I would’ve been first in line to kick somebody else’s butt for, and the people who claimed to be my friends should have known that. It tore me up that they didn’t give me any benefit of the doubt. The ones who did, and who asked me about it in private instead of ranting about me in an open forum, are still my friends today. But that’s a really tiny number, sadly.
At any rate, it taught me who my real friends are, and that I didn’t want to be that kind of gossipy, viciously judgmental person, two lessons I’m happy to walk away from the last decade having learned. It’s just too bad that personal growth sometimes comes with the worst kind of growing pains.
Happy New Year, Bojo. Here’s to a better one for both of us.