Love at a distance

Keeping in touch is harder than it looks. losangelesfamilylawadvocate.com

Long-distance relationships seem to be the perfect solution for many couples entering university. But does this commitment really work as well as it should? Now that summer is over and reality is looming, will those promises of faithfulness be kept? Will the “Skype every day” rule be observed? While some may argue that long-distance relationships are possible, they may prove to give more trouble than anything as time passes.

After graduating from high school more than a year ago, my friend Lisa was convinced by her boyfriend, who was going to attend university in the U.S., that they should continue their relationship. However, their trust slowly turned into mistrust, and their daily communications changed into arguments. Lisa and her boyfriend ultimately spent one year in their long-distance relationship before they decided to go their separate ways.

The years that we spend in university change us. They expand our thoughts and let us discover new things about ourselves. It comes as no surprise, then, that Lisa and her boyfriend ultimately ended their relationship. Not only did they realize that they were each in love with a person who was undergoing personal changes, but they also discovered that their perception of what a significant other should embody had perhaps also changed. Physically meeting is, obviously, a huge problem; even phoning may be quite costly, and in university, finding time to connect at all may be difficult. Such circumstances are out of the average individual’s hands, and they certainly take their toll on any two people in love.

Another contributing factor is the waning of trust. Trust is the key to a successful relationship, and if trust is lost, the chances of maintaining a successful relationship are low. For couples in long-distance relationships, simply not speaking on a daily basis may be enough to shake a steady relationship. Other entities, such as Facebook, may also stand in the way of mutual confidence (think of those pictures from last weekend’s rager). Furthermore, the time that a long-distance relationship couple spends apart may lead the two to the realization that there are other individuals in the world who may be a better fit for each of them. The world is full of different opportunities, and no campus community experience falls short of changing how you think.

It is never easy to say goodbye to someone you’ve shared so much time with, but sometimes it is necessary to examine the bigger picture and make an objective decision based on fact rather than emotion. For those who are brave enough to make such a difficult decision, do not dwell on negative thoughts. Instead, give yourself time to grieve and then move on with your life. For those who plan to defy the core message of this article (and there will be some few such individuals), be sure to focus on trust, consideration, and have a happy relationship.