Food fight: Planning menus for finicky toddlers

War has been raging, but the point of contention isn’t a border dispute, genocide or an ousted government.

Instead, combatants are fighting over Chicken McNuggets, and the conflict has ravaged a Clarendon Hills kitchen.

Jessica Young

War has been raging, but the point of contention isn’t a border dispute, genocide or an ousted government.

Instead, combatants are fighting over Chicken McNuggets, and the conflict has ravaged a Clarendon Hills kitchen.

“My 6-year-old son is a super-picky eater. All he wants is McDonald’s or peanut butter and honey sandwiches, so we’re working on that,” mom Fran Shultis said. “It’s been a big issue. I present other foods to him regardless, and I bargain with him, telling him he has to eat three bites of a pork chop and five green beans before he gets to have something else, but I don’t know how to solve this.”

It’s an age-old battle waged between concerned parents and finicky kids who refuse to eat anything besides grilled cheese, hot dogs and tater tots. What’s a mom to put on the menu?

Shultis has tried mixing vegetables into rice, which her son can tolerate. She has baked whole-grain bread in the shape of a cake. But he won’t have any of it.

“I remember being a kid and sitting at the table staring at my plate of brussel sprouts, and I don’t want a repeat of that,” she said. “But he’s developing, and I’m concerned he’s not getting the proper nutrients, vitamins and minerals. I’ve started putting a liquid vitamin into his chocolate milk to combat his fussiness.”

Playing chef to a persnickety tyke can be a frustrating and thankless job. Yet with a little guidance from some childhood development and nutrition experts, mealtime can be less painful.

“Parents get really uptight when their kid isn’t eating right or enough during a meal, but we often fail to realize that their appetites aren’t as predictable as adults,” said Dawn Lantero, a Hinsdale author of the “S.P.L.A.S.H. Parenting Principles” handbook. “But it’s also not healthy to cater to the every whim of your little one because it sets a pattern for control issues. You don’t want to get in the habit of making secondary meals or constantly supplementing with kid-friendly stuff.”

• Behavioral insight: It can take seven to 10 introductions to the same food for children to really have a basis on which to reject it, she added. Exposure is important, and if something keeps reappearing on their plate, they’re more apt to accept it.

That being said, kids love finger foods and dipping sauces rather than utensils because they still struggle with coordination, according to Michelok Di Vito, chief clinical dietitian at MacNeal Hospital in Berwyn.

“Exercising some independence in eating — whether in menu choices or in the physical act of consuming food — is a way for them to take ownership of their life at a time when mom is still helping them get dressed and tying their shoes,” she added.

• Repetition: It’s common for 2- and 3-year-old toddlers to experience something called a food jag, or a period of time where they request the same food item for meal after meal.

“If it’s cheeseburgers they want every day, you can give them a small portion as long as it’s accompanied by other food with the expectation that ‘Yes, you do have to eat more than just that,’” said Drusilla Banks, a food science and nutrition specialist at the University of Illinois Extension Office, which has offices in St. Charles, Naperville and Joliet, among other locations.

• Choices: Offering a child an option between two or three dishes is OK, but parents should make sure it’s not an open-ended question that they can’t control, Lantero said. More personal choices should be available at lunch rather than dinner, when the entire family should share the same food.

• Time: “They’re at the developmental stage where they’re working on fine motor skills and exploring senses like touch and taste,” Banks said. “So don’t get mad if they don’t enjoy chewing tough beef or seem to be chomping for an inordinate amount of time. And be patient if they play with their food or pick up a single pea or blueberry at a time.”

• Cooking solutions: Using cookie cutters to make shapes out of sandwiches can go a long way, Di Vito said. Tacos and other tortilla dishes like cream cheese or turkey rolls often appeal to toddlers, and homemade English muffin pizzas are a healthier alternative to frozen ones, she added.

Interactive kitchen experiences can be a parent’s savior as well.

“Children always want to taste what they had a hand in cooking, so engage them as much as possible,” Banks said. “Let them contribute to the meal by opening a package, mixing some ingredients, stirring, putting scraps in the garbage or setting the table.”

• Balance: According to Lantero, rather than agonizing over the daily nutritional intake of their child, parents should track meals throughout the week to determine whether the diet has been balanced.

“My 2-year-old niece has a pattern of eating very large breakfasts, medium-sized lunches and tiny dinners,” she said. “So adapt to that and offer healthier sides like smooth yogurt or melon at those times when they’re hungrier to go along with the cereal or pancakes they beg for.”

• Reading: Banks suggested that parents attempt to teach acceptance of different culinary tastes by reading “Gregory The Terrible Eater” by Mitchell Sharmat and “The Runaway Tortilla” by Eric A. Kimmel with their picky children. Or consult “Baby Bistro Cookbook” for ideas on how to adapt recipes for the young’ns.

• Other tricks of the trade: Always serve an old standby with a new food that’s being introduced so the association is positive, Banks said.

To ensure toddlers are hungry come lunch and dinner, parents shouldn’t let them sip on juice or milk before mealtimes because liquids will prematurely fill them up. As for dinnerware, the use of smaller plates and cups can help kids feel less overwhelmed by the amount of food they are required to consume.

“You might not always be popular as the cook if you don’t let them indulge on lollipops and ice cream cones for dinner, but you’re in charge, so show some authority and don’t be a wuss,” Banks said. “They’ll be healthier in the long run if they’re conditioned to a variety of foods.”