Bride-to-be Blogger Stephanie: How Do I Choose My Accessories Without My Dress?

I’m anxiously awaiting the arrival of my dress. When I purchased it, La Bella Moda ballpark-ed February as an arrival date, so the countdown begins!

It seems like such a strange concept to me to order a dress and not see it again for six months. And I believe it’s this withdrawal period that’s producing the anxiety.

I never had the chance to take a picture of myself in the dress. The salon where I originally tried it on did not allow photos, so I’m always trying to recall the image of me standing before the mirror from my rather poor memory.

You know when you were going to prom and trying to figure out how you wanted to do your hair and which shoes and jewelry would complement your dress? Well, you likely pulled your dress out of the closet and simply tried it on. Problem solved.

I wish I could do that! As I begin to think beyond the dress—do I want a veil? Does the dress need a sash? Do I want to wear just chandelier earrings or more subdued earrings and a necklace? Which shoes will look best?—I really wish I had it!

There was one veil that blew me away. I tried it on at a different salon, with a different dress. It was cathedral-length, ultra sheer, and accented with pieces of floating lace appliqué along the edge. All the other veils I tried on made me feel kind of silly. The veils with the blusher and voluminous tulle made me feel particularly ridiculous. And the veils with a wide, intricate lace pattern around the edge made me feel like I was middle-aged. This veil, however, made me feel like a bride, and frankly, pretty magical.

I may just have to go back to the Bridal Garden and order it. I think the fact that I’m still thinking about it—still dreaming of it—is a very good sign. My concern is that I don’t know how it will look with my dress. I never had the chance to try on the two together. I’m not sure if the coloring will be right, and if the additional lace will be overkill.

I tried on some very pretty sashes/belts throughout my dress quest but never quite found the right combination with my final choice. I don’t think the dress needs one—but I do think it could be a beautiful accent.

Jewelry isn’t as big a concern, as it doesn’t involve a long, drawn-out timeline for acquiring it. The problem is that the veil and sash do, so I have to make a decision as soon as possible. I’m holding out hope that my dress will arrive soon, so I can find the perfect veil and sash match in person, instead of merely hoping and praying everything works out.

So my strategy will be to wait a bit longer, but there’s one accessory I’ve been told over and over again that I can’t wait on: shoes. I’ve been told I need them for my first fitting for an accurate hem, which of course makes sense. But I find myself in the same position: How do I find shoes to match a dress that I have no photo of, that I tried on six months ago?

Surprisingly, my friend Emily and I set off on this new quest just a week ago and may have already found success: a stunning pair of Badgley Mischka pumps. The heel size is perfect—substantial, but comfortable. There’s a rhinestone broach of sorts on the top of the shoe that ads some flair. It comes in an off-white/beige and a light blue (something blue?). And while more expensive than my typical pair of shoes, the price is not outrageous. Of the four stores we looked in, none had my size. But I’m going to give it another go soon, and I have a feeling I’ve already found my shoes.

So I will continue to anxiously wait for my dress to arrive, dreaming of that phone call that it’s come in. Fingers crossed, it won’t be too much longer!

Did you choose your accessories before or after your first dress fitting? Were you anxiously awaiting the arrival of your dress too?

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