Sid Waddell Quotes

Dart
Players have came to love Sid Waddell for his commentary on darts, but he
is best remembered for his famous one liners. All of his sayings were
unrehearsed, unscripted and unprepared in both sense of the word.

Judge for yourself here are a number of his famous sayings. I have
listed my favourites at the top and recorded others by approximate date
order. if you know of any more please let me know.

Sid was not just a commentator for darts but also for Pool, He was an established
novelist and writer of a number of dart books.

Visit Sid Waddell's Official Web Site to learn more about Sid
click here

"This lad has more checkouts than Tescos."

"He looks about as happy as a penguin in a microwave."

"That's like giving Dracula the keys to the blood bank"

"Steve Beaton - The Adonis of darts, what poise, what elegance - a true roman
gladiator with plenty of hair wax."

"The atmosphere is so tense, if Elvis walked in ,with a portion of chips.....
you could hear the vinegar sizzle on them"

"Look at the man go, its like trying to stop a water buffalo with a pea-shooter"

"He may practice 12 hours a day, but he's not shy of the burger van!"

"He's as cool as a prized marrow!"

"Darts players are probably a lot fitter than most footballers in overall body
strength."

"Keith Deller is like Long John Silver - he's badly in need of another leg."

"Cliff Lazarenko's jumping up and down like a gorilla saying "give me back my
banana!"

"Bristow reasons . . . Bristow quickens ... Aaah, Bristow."

"It's just like taking a sausage from a boy in a wheelchair."

"As they say at the DHSS, we're getting the full benefit here."

"The players are under so much duress, it's like duressic park out there!"

"That was like throwing three pickled onions into a thimble!"

"Big Cliff Lazarenko's idea of exercise is sitting in a room with the windows
open taking the lid off something cool and fizzy."

"Jockey Wilson . . . What an athlete!”

"He's about as predictable as a wasp on speed"

"If you're round your auntie's tonight, tell her to stop making the cookie's and
come thru to the living room and watch these two amazing athletes beat the
proverbial house out of each other"

"It's the nearest thing to public execution this side of Saudi Arabia."

"It's like trying to pin down a kangaroo on a trampoline"

"Well as giraffes say, you don't get no leaves unless you stick your neck out"

"His eyes are bulging like the belly of a hungry chaffinch"

"That's the greatest comeback since Lazarus."

"Under that heart of stone beat muscles of pure flint."

"He is as slick as minestrone soup"

"There hasn't been this much excitement since the Romans fed the Christians to
the Lions."

"John Lowe is striding out like Alexander the Great conquering the Persians"

"There's only one word for that - magic darts!"

"Keith Deller's not just an underdog, he's an underpuppy!"

"I don't know what he's had for breakfast but Taylor knocked the Snap, Crackle
and Pop outta Bristow"

"When Alexander of Macedonia was 33, he cried salt tears because there were no
more worlds to conquer....Bristow's only 27."