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Monday, September 19, 2011

Fishstix, Cross Balls and 5th Grade Math

On 60 Minutes yesterday I heard a quote, “The only
difference between men and boys is the price of the toys.” Lie.
There’s no difference at all. Yesterday
in the first ever combined Cat 1/2-Elite Masters OVCX race all 50 men and boys
on the starting grid were no stranger to the podium. In the past few years of stricter upgrade
practices, everyone in the combined field got there by landing podiums. Everyone knows how to hit a hole shot, thread
a bike through a 14 inch gap, and isn’t afraid to make a gutsy pass. Hands down, I haven’t been in a race this
fast and competitive since a Detroit UCI event in like 2005. Being the runt of the litter, a Cat 2 45+
Master racing with the best in the Ohio Valley, I learned quickly that tiny
mistakes can turn into big gaps in the clang of a cowbell. Here’s two things I’m taking away from the
first OVCX race at Fisherman’s Park to raise my game.

More Balls Than Most: Elite Masters Women Podium

Growing A Big Pair of Dangly CX Balls

Through all my training so far, I haven’t sharpened my cross
fearlessness. It’s the drive to keep driving forward in the
mayhem, the trust in your skills and fitness to thread the needle, the mantra
of forward momentum, the heightened alertness to be calm and calculating grabbing
every opportunity to climb the ladder toward the front in the first half lap. In July I got back into Yoga, core work,
running, intervals and skill work. Now after
9 weeks of dedicated CX training, I felt as if I came into my first race more
fit than I have been in years. At the
same time, with a combined Elite/Masters field, the competition was stronger
than it’s ever been in years. Every guy
on the starting grid knows how to win a cross race. Everyone is fit. Everyone is strong. Mistakes and missteps cost double. A wince, missing a pedal, a botched shift or
a touch of the brakes is an instant gap.
They add up quick.

A log killed Corey Green's wheel

Sunday I bobbled my front row start, usually a strong suit, missed
my clip-in and was immediately swarmed on both sides by the first two rows of
riders. I didn’t panic, but I kept
sprinting to the holeshot, eventually getting the click. Into the banked first corner, two riders, one
on each shoulder took the high and low lines simultaneously. The exit had one good line and all three of
us wanted it. Sandwiched, with handlebars
lined up as even as school desks, I chickened out. I touched the brakes and escaped being a
pinched loaf, giving up position. The
second the course opened up to a flowing straightaway, with the accuracy of magicians
throwing swords, dudes were driving bikes through holes so tight, I swear I
brushed knuckles once. I should’ve been
taking instead of surviving. It’s time
to add a little risk taking to practice.
Maybe mass start drills combined with a holeshot, a short straightaway
and a 2nd corner to give it that real cross race flavor.

Young Spencer Petrov out of Juniors on top of the 4's

5th Grade Math

It’s easy to get discouraged if you had a bad race, 50
meters may as well be a mile. But I like
to break things down. Your commute to
work isn’t a 20 minute drive. Its backing
out of the driveway, 5 stop signs, an on ramp, three lane changes and hunting
for a parking spot. Look at the finishing splits from Sunday. Pick out a person or
two that you think you can contend with.
If you finished top ten, look at top 5 or the bottom rung of the
podium. If you finished 40th,
look at the top 25 or 30. You may not
have seen them most of the race. They
likely finished 3 minutes in front of you.
However, when you twist and crunch the numbers, you’ll realize it’s not
much more than finding a route with less stop signs.

A Deer in the Headlights

3 minutes per hour, is one minute every 20 minutes, is thirty
seconds every 10 minutes, is 15 seconds every five minutes, is 3 seconds every
minute is 1.5 seconds every half minute.
That’s miniscule. I don’t have a
power meter, but in the course of an hour, something tells me that might be a handful
of watts, a kg or two of body weight and/or simply having the balls not to
touch the brakes as often. At 6 feet
tall and 158ish pounds, it’s crazy, but I’m one of the chunkier monkeys on the
start line. I don’t need a power meter
to tell me that my avg watts/kg (fancy talk for strength to weight ratio) could
be better. I saw more boney ribs Sunday
than a Hollywood BBQ. Some guys didn’t even
have pecs, making me feel like man boobs.
I can tell right now that I’d be better served by crunching the numbers
on the side of the cereal box and bathroom scale than those of a $1000 power meter. People
like to make racing out to be science, but according to the quarter inch deep hole
I call a belly button, it’s really 5th grade math at best.