Top Five Bacon Dishes in Miami

If you're like any sane person in this universe, bacon is one of your favorite foods.

In fact, society has become so fixated on the bacon craze that we fret over a "baconpocalypse" and other general bacon shortages. We put bacon on everything. We fashion costumes out of it. We put our dogs in costumes made of it. We make bouquets and centerpieces out of it. We charge extra for it. Um, it's just bacon, right?

Exactly.

It's just bacon. Its deliciousness garners every bit of attention from the world, and a world without it -- well, we shudder at the thought.

Miami knows its fair share of bacon dishes, and though the decision was painstakingly tough (for there are so many noteworthy options), we've narrowed the list to the top five.

Cue the baconpalooza.

Bacon-wrapped dates at Sugarcane, $11.

Alex Rodriguez

5. Bacon-wrapped dates at Sugarcane
A finely tuned symphony begins to orchestrate when bacon and dates and cheese come together. Timon Balloo's recipe includes Manchego cheese and linguiça sausage -- with a little salt and pepper to taste. A plump, sweet, and juicy date houses a fine concoction of tender cheese and meat, and once it's wrapped in perfectly cooked, smokey bacon, baby angels sing. Is that cheesy to say? Who cares. It's the truth.

Bacon and pecan sticky bun at Acme Bakery, under 4 bucks.

Alex Rodriguez

4. Bacon and Pecan Sticky Bun at Acme
When we're not trying to hoard strips of bacon onto our breakfast platter in the morning, we're busy trying to find ways to incorporate it in everything else we eat. Because surely, everything that exists must taste better with bacon added to it. Case in point: the sticky bun. At Acme Bakery, a pastry platter behind the glass enclosure holds a tray of sticky buns loaded with chunks of bacon. We won't even try to put it delicately. Whoever came up with these, wasn't shy, and definitely unabashed by their love for bacon. In fact, it's more of a "I'll have some sticky bun to go with my bacon" dish.

Bacon and Egg Udon at Gigi, $14.

Lesley Elliot

3. Bacon and Egg Udon at Gigi
Noodles for breakfast doesn't exactly sound appetizing. Unless, of course, you're the type of person who likes dinner for breakfast and pancakes for dinner. Whatever your preference may be, Gigi's got it going on. After a long night at Bardot (or, anywhere else in Miami), Gigi's got a piping-hot plate of bacon and egg udon ready to help you soak up your night. The slippery noodles make the perfect host for your typical bacon, egg, and cheese flavor combo. You're all just jealous because you didn't think of it first.

Maple Bacon Corn Muffin, $2.85.

Alex Rodriguez

2. Maple Bacon Corn Muffin at Lee & Marie's
Sometimes, life hits the jackpot. No, we're not talking about money (though a little extra from time to time would be swell). We're convinced that if the maple bacon corn muffin from Lee & Marie's suddenly turned into the world's currency, we would have a stronger global economy. The worth of our dollar muffin would go up, and we'd no longer have to buy Euros and Pounds for half and double the price of a measly dollar. We would all just use the maple bacon corn muffin. Those who prefer its sweetness would value its worth in millions. Those who prefer its muffin-moist perfection would value its worth in billions. And, well, those who just outright love the damn thing, would value it as priceless. [But $2.85 ain't bad!]

Bacon and Blue at Ms. Cheezious, $7.

Ms. Cheezious

1. Bacon and Blue at Ms. Cheezious
They say the world was created in seven days. A little known fact is that the bacon and blue cheese sandwich from Ms. Cheezious was created on the 8th, and everything else came after it. It was created so that adults could re-live their childhoods in real-time (with a broader palate). Hankering for a grilled cheese sandwich? Skip the traditional Kraft squares and toasted Wonder Bread (which may or may not even exist in the coming years). One-up your childhood with the bacon and blue with green onions on fresh baked sourdough. You'll never live in the past again.