1. Kris Jenner debuts a fake North WestFor anyone who somehow resisted the allure of Kris, a new talk show hosted by Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner, newborn granddaughter North West did not make an appearance — but that didn't stop Jenner from trying to trick everybody into thinking she would show up. "You never know who will stop by our show today!" read a post on the show's official Facebook and Twitter accounts, alongside a picture of Jenner holding a baby. (As it turned out, the baby belonged to one of the show's staffers.) "Let [North West] have her privacy for a little bit," said Jenner, while doing everything she could to ensure that people keep talking about her. [Us Weekly]………………………………………………………………………………

2. Kanye West's new clothing line has already sold outIf you were hoping to get your hands on an item from Kanye West's new clothing line, we hope you have a time machine: The capsule collection, designed by West in collaboration with A.P.C., sold out almost instantly after it debuted online on Sunday. The clothing line, which collaborator Jean Touitou said was "two years in the making," consisted of jeans, hoodies, and a few T-shirts. The pieces ranged in price from 120 to 280 in dollars, 91 to 215 in euro, or "way, way too much money" in any currency. [People]………………………………………………………………………………

3. Johnny Depp will probably star in Alice in Wonderland 2Now that America has roundly rejected Johnny Depp and his weird dead crow hat in The Lone Ranger, the actor has reportedly retreated to the (marginally less weird) top hat he wore when he played the Mad Hatter in 2010's Alice in Wonderland. According to Deadline, the actor is in final talks to appear in Alice in Wonderland2, which will come on the heels of his starring turn in Pirates of the Caribbean 5. Unfortunately, our repeated calls for Edward Scissorhands 2: Still Making the Cut remain unanswered. [Deadline]………………………………………………………………………………

4. Everybody wants to read J.K. Rowling's secret bookNow that Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling has officially been outed as the real author behind The Cuckoo's Calling — a crime novel she published in April under the pseudonym Robert Gailbraith — the book has experienced what could safely be described as a boost in popularity. According to The AV Club, The Cuckoo's Calling sales have jumped a whopping 507,000 percent since Rowling's secret was revealed, resulting in the book being "temporarily out of stock" at both Amazon and Barnes & Noble's websites. Any aspiring authors looking to replicate Rowling's incredibly successful P.R. grab are advised to invent their own pen name — like, say, R.K. Jowling. [The AV Club]………………………………………………………………………………

5. Dave Matthews hitchhikes with fans to his own concertOn their way to one of the five-hour jam sessions Dave Matthews devotees are inexplicably willing to accept as concerts, two Dave Matthews fans picked up a surprising hitchhiker: Dave Matthews. The singer was cycling to the concert at Pennsylvania's Hersheytown Station when his bike broke down, at which point he successfully hitchhiked in order to make the concert in time. "We didn't know how to make conversation with him," confessed one of the fans, for whom "What Would You Say?" has now taken on a whole new meaning. [USA Today]