Sunday, December 30, 2012

Resolutions - Just Not Mine

I've said before that I just don't do New Years Resolutions anymore. I never keep them. Three years ago it was to work out more. That's a joke. I hate working out...or really exerting energy. Friday night Kaylen and I played Just Dance on the Wii. After one round of Jump On It I thought I was going to die in the living room.Two years ago my resolution was to wear more high heels. Since that time I have bought a whopping one pair...ONE pair of high heels. I. Don't. Do. Heels.

So instead of boring you with all the goals I'm not going to keep, I will present to you ten New Years resolutions I wish others would make:

Throw away all MC Hammer pants and sleeveless shirts. -Justin Bieber

Sing less and focus more on my fragrance line. -Taylor Swift

Post fewer political rants and pictures on Facebook. -Everyone on Facebook.

Be less of an entitled tool and leave the smoking jackets to Hugh Hefner. -Scott Disick

Break the habit of sloshing water everywhere and drinking it off the floor instead of just drinking from the bowl in the first place. -Dixie

Show more emotion and fix my crooked smile. -Kristen Stewart

Learn to cook and to sing so Alyssa and I can sing harmonies while I make fantastic dinners. -Chris

Quit drinking, don't cheat on this husband (no matter how good looking my next co-star is), get it together and start making good music again. -LeAnn Rimes

Work really hard on growing some money. -Tree in the front yard

Put in extra hours to get Sons of Anarchy back on TV before September. Nine months really is too long. -Kurt Sutter

There you have it. So far it looks like Chris and I will be ringing in the new year at a local bar and listening to The Naked Eskimos (an awesome local cover band). I think I've mentioned them before. Should be fun. Make 2013 a good year!