Tuesday, May 17, 2011

I guess you could call me a TLC junky. Whether it’s Say Yes to the Dress, Hoarding, Extreme Couponers or The World’s Largest Man, I’m watching it. But the truth is that most of these shows leave me feeling a little uncomfortable. They are so ridiculous. I usually find myself jaw-dropped after most shows. $5000 for one dress?? Let’s get real, people. But nothing--absolutely nothing, shocks me more than Toddlers and Tiaras. Have you seen it? This show is in a realm of its own. It's about super young girls doing beauty pageants but, mostly it’s just hours and hours of footage of mothers (and occasionally fathers which is disturbing) physically and emotionally abusing their daughters (and occasionally sons which is also um…weird). Has no one turned these people in to social services yet? Just kidding. It's probably not that extreme. But for reals, have you seen some of the things they do to their children? These girls have been wearing fake teeth, hair, eyelashes and nails since before they could walk. They are forced to be spray tanned, waxed and plucked. They endure hours upon hours of their precious childhood lives rehearsing routines and sassy little struts. But just you wait, it gets better. It’s been recently revealed that there are mothers who personally perform Botox on their eight year old daughters.....I’m sorry, since when does an eight year old face need more plumping? Are they nuts?? This pretty much pushed me over the edge.

Some people say the reason the parents make their daughters do pageants is because they want to relive their glory days or need to live a life they never had. I’m sure others do pageants because they truly believe that their daughter is the bomb.com and a bag of chips which may be true, who knows. Maybe some just do it because it’s lots and lots of fun. I don’t actually know what the motive is and I don’t really care. It’s the principles behind the pageants that really get to me. Pageants teach you that winning a fake crown and a few hundred dollars is more important than whether or not you had a fun time. That it’s appropriate for a four year old to go on a stage in a bikini and dance to Lady Gaga. That screaming and crying will get you absolutely anything that you want. That true beauty comes when you spend hours in front of a mirror or at a salon. That even as a perfect little eight year old girl, she isn’t pretty exactly the way she is. When you tell your daughter that the only way she can win a beauty contest is if she sticks a bunch of needles in her face and pumps it with artificial crud, the only thing that you are teaching her is that she is not, and never will be, good enough. And that just makes me want to scream (I initially wanted to say “hurl” or “punch something” but then I thought everyone would think I’m disgusting and violent—but really, that’s how mad it makes me).

Don’t get me wrong--I don’t feel like these are bad people. I’m sure they are loving mothers and do not have bad intentions at all. My heart just aches for these girls who will never be able to look at themselves and feel like they are beautiful just the way they are. It’s not just an issue in the beauty pageant world, though. I see it everywhere. And do you know what I think? I think that it sucks. And I think it’s the work of Satan. Because Satan wants you to feel not good enough and he wants you to believe that you should be something other than what you are. Because as soon as you believe that, you’ll believe that you aren’t good enough to do anything and so you’ll so stop doing things and you’ll stop being awesome. And it’s a bunch of lies. The truth is that you’re perfect. You’re perfect because you are exactly the way Heavenly Father made you the way He wanted you.

So do yourself a favor and look in the mirror and decide that you like what you see. Decide that that weird crooked thing your lip does is charming and that your extremely bushy eyebrows frame your face quite nicely and that the way your hair curls up at the bottom adds personality. Then, smile at yourself and remind yourself that you’re awesome and move on. Now doesn’t that seem much better than giving yourself puncture wounds? I thought so, too.

Monday, May 16, 2011

So, one of the things I do to help Reed is get him ready for bed. This process usually includes brushing his teeth, washing his face, helping him go to the bathroom and getting him a drink (all of this is done while I tell him some sort of bedtime story that he generally sleeps through because I’m annoying). Next, I tuck him in and turn off the lights.

Then, at 2:56 in the morning I make my way up the stairs and completely crash on my bed. And then do you know what I do? I think to myself,

“Crap”

Do you know why? Because that is the moment when I remember that I still have to brush my teeth, wash my face, go to the bathroom and get a drink. And that moment is the worst moment of my whole day. Seriously. (I know, I know-I have a really hard life)

All I’m saying is that sometimes I think that Reed is living the dream.

Friday, May 13, 2011

There are few things in this world that I love more than Zumba. Seriously. It's the bomb. And just when I was thinking it couldn't get any better, we learned a new dance to this great song. And I couldn't stop laughing the whole time because Jamie and I spent WAY too many hours of our junior high lives watching this ridiculous video. Those were the days. These are the days, too. It's a good life. Thanks to Gary for making it even better.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

You know that moment when you're just laying in your bed

and suddenly it hits you that in a month you're going to get on a plane all by yourself and fly to the other side of the world to a place with no toilets or clean water where you will try your best to make some lives a little better and make really great friends and see elephants and monkeys and sleep under a mosquito net and then you get those faint jitters deep in your stomach and your heart starts slowly coming out of your chest and then you think to yourself that your life is awesome?