So, sometimes, the Clog gets a kick out of Craigslist personals. Don’t judge. If we weren’t kind of creepy, we wouldn’t have discovered this.

The title of the ad? “Professor/Author Seeks Barely Legal Bookworm.” The hook? He’s looking for “highbrow conversations and bouts of polymorphous perversity” — “an intellectual giant in a Lolita body.”

The catch? This ad was posted in Berkeley.

Incoming freshmen better watch out. Our very own Humbert Humbert is waiting in office hours for you to “tell [him] which antinomian proclivities animate the secret regions of your soul.”