Wacky Jacqui Smith says whole country crusading against CCTV

Impales self on own negative, and boosts Tories

Home Secretary Wacky Jacqui Smith has conceded that there is zero support for CCTV cameras in UK communities. In a shock letter to the Guardian, she claims massed phalanxes of irate burghers are poised to join a Tory march on Whitehall to overthrow the hated devices.

Apparently... Jacqui herself still seems massively enthusiastic about CCTV, insisting that the Graun's coverage has been "disappointingly one-sided", and claiming that "CCTV has helped to reclaim our town centres and public spaces for the law-abiding majority..."

But then she falls off her bike. "I know of no community that has yet to join the crusade of some in the Conservative party for fewer CCTV cameras. Quite the reverse."

That's right, she doesn't know of a single community in the country that isn't crusading for fewer CCTV cameras. And she's an ex-teacher too, with a brace of teachers for parents. Crack (shurely shome? - Ed) teams of Home Office sentence structural engineers are currently racing to the scene of the accident, we understand. ®