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Friday, January 06, 2012

Secret Place - 2012 Memorial Stone

Nearly every year for quite a few years God has graced me with a word. One word (sometimes a short phrase) which clues me in to the conversations and paths Jesus and I will share in the upcoming season. This has become more meaningful to me than New Year's Resolutions (though I do love me some goals). I have come to term these Memorial Stones - you can read the list at the tab above. You can read more about this here as well (no reason to write it all again).

Abba, Daddy God, has already been meeting, encouraging, challenging, motivating me around the word for the year. In theology speak it would be "sanctuary"...in De'Etta speak God has been sharing with me about a "secret place" or "secrecy".....

For an extrovert, who has lived most of life in front of public scrutiny (PK, MK, married a pastor) and has embraced the fish bowl, I was astonished in September of this year to find I was CRAVING solitude. I wanted to find a place where NO ONE knew my NAME, NO ONE knew my POSITION, NO ONE knew my FAMILY, NO ONE NEEDED me or had EXPECTATIONS of me.... I wanted to be anonymous. This became a near driving need. Those close to me heard me say several times, "I want to go hide in a cave," or "Nov 14th, I'm crawling into the cave." (Yes, I've heard my hubs speak on Elijah in the cave and THAT is what I craved. I understand Elijah). I was o.k. with the idea of solitude. In fact I was counting the days until my leadership position would end and I planned to crawl away to rest - for a good long time. Into this countdown, my wise husband calmly asked, "Have you PRAYED about whether you are to be willing to serve another term?"

No, I hadn't. It took a dear prayer warrior and three weeks before I was ready to say, "OK - show me a verse". I got the water in the desert and my plans aren't your plans verses (as I studied the SERMON ON THE MOUNT with Precept). Those are always trouble. Each verse also had a promise of joy - and going forth with dancing and shouting. God began to give me glimmers of vision for another couple of year's of service...BUT I was MOVING in 6 months....I couldn't get away from it and submitted an "application" and decided the selection team would hear from God...I just had to obey. I told them we were scheduled to leave in July 2012....but we'd asked for an extension. They selected me. I cried, I really, really , really well.....it was simply hard. I wanted to hide and God was requiring more leadership. But the verses assured me there would be joy!

I left for 4 weeks of travel in the states....God lovingly began to speak to me...Sweetly...dearly....You can read more about this time in the post - Hidden Treasures/Rest. There has been so much...but secrets are intimate and confidential...and I'll share as I feel released to do so. The bottom line is that God met me and has lovingly showed me things I've known for years at a deeper level about resting, hiding, the Secret Place.

The following is from Dr. Zodhiates' Complete Dictionary of Word study in Pocket Bible.

"secret/hidden" - Strongs 2927 - Kruptos - hidden, concealed, secret, in secret where one cannot be seen by others, to be covered.

"sanctuary" - place set apart and consecrated as holy - also served as a refuge and asylum....

If I MUST choose one word - it would be sanctuary. I tend to like "Secret Place" or "Secret Sanctuary" better. LOL

As I shared in Hidden Treasures/Rest - "In the midst of a public season, taking time to be hidden with Christ in the secret place is my lifeline, the solace and rest I crave. This is the "cave" Abba Father lovingly grants in this public season where I'm not allowed to "go anonymous". I can be hidden/anonymous every time I enter the "secret place" with Him."

I've gone there often these past two months. My journal pages are full of sweet lessons. He is becoming my secret place, my sanctuary in ever-deeper ways....the great thing is He was before...but His mercies are NEW to us every morning. I'm refreshed. I'm peaceful.