I'm always making lists, they just make dreams seem more possible, don't they? If it's written down, it's going to happen. Instead of a list of things to come however, this list is more a collection of things that currently are - little everyday dreams that already have come true. Inspired by my girl,

homemade bread and homemade chutney. Adam is really into cooking these days and I think it's pretty wonderful. He's a natural! More please.

Drinking >>

apple juice - a lot. We bought six containers of apple juice for a party last weekend as we were in charge of the warm winter cocktails, and we only ended up using one of them. So we've got a lot of apple juice to get through over here.

Dreaming of >>

cherry blossoms. We are hoping to plan a trip to Japan next year to see the cherry blossoms. Fingers crossed we can make it happen!

Anticipating >>

this little blog of mine moving house. If all goes well it should be set up on squarespace by the end of the week, a move I have been anticipating for months now and I'm so looking forward to it.

Wearing >>

hoodies and sweatpants. It's too cold for anything else.

Watching >>

The very last ever episode of Poirot. That's it. He's gone for good. We are seriously depressed over here.

Enjoying >>

a splash of condensed milk in my coffee in the morning. Have you tried it? It's ever so indulgent.

Making >>

a hat for Adam. We took the bus to the wool shop the other day so he could pick out a yarn for his new winter hat - hopefully I can pull this off (I've never successfully knitted a hat before).

Reading >>

The Book Thief. Oh my goodness, have you read it? I'm loving it so far.

Purchasing >>

some clothes, but I'm still narrowing down my options. I'm currently loving

Last month, when the weather started to cool, I hauled my suitcase full of winter clothes out of storage and set about packing away my summer clothes to replace them with cosy knits, winter dresses and layers upon layers.

Except that there weren't any there... I had a few jumpers, three dresses, and a bunch of boots. Where did all my winter clothes go?! I know it sounds crazy but at some point last spring I must have decided to do a massive purge to get rid of lots of old clothes, and then completely forget about it!

For about a month now I've been recycling the same outfits again and again, which is fine because they're clothes that I love, but eventually I know I'm going to have to get online and buy some new bits and pieces. Especially jeans - I only have one pair that fits properly that doesn't have holes in.

I'm dreaming of neutral colours, masculine lines, chunky knits, wide-brimmed hats, messy hair, natural textures and pops of colour - usually in the form of red or pink lipstick. I would also love a wool blazer and while we're dreaming, a Prada handbag.

I usually turn to asos for affordable fashion, but if you have any online shops that you can't live without, send me a link!

Last time I was in Canada I met up with a friend and she told me that her favourite breakfast to have when visiting Toroing (she lives in London too) is french toast with cream cheese. I couldn't believe I had never heard of such a thing - french toast and cream cheese? Genius!

She did tell me where to find it, but I propmtly forgot the name of the restaurant so I never managed to give it a go. But the idea stuck with me and I've been dreaming about it ever since, and ways to make it just a little bit more amazing.

Then a few weeks ago I was walking through Broadway Market and I spotted some challa bread (pronounced hulla, unless I'm mistaken), which is my favourite bread with which to make french toast. I thought the time had finally come to give it a go! Not too sweet, not too savory, I present to you: French Toast a la Nishaantishu.

for the filling mix together:

half a tub of philly cream cheese

one tablespoon of bonne maman blueberry jam

once mixed, put in the fridge.

for the french toast whisk together:

two eggs (if you're making this for a lot of people the ratio is about one to one, so one egg per slice of bread)

half a teaspoon of vanilla extract

one and a half tablespoons of condensed milk

pinch of salt

Cut off two thick slices of challa bread and soak in the whisked egg mixture until they are squashy on all sides, but not so soggy that they fall apart when you try to put them in the pan.

Fry in butter until they are golden brown - this shouldn't take too long as the egg shouldn't have soaked all the way through the bread like it does with traditional french toast made with slightly stale bread.

When you're finished with the french toast, let it cool a little bit before spreading on the blueberry cream cheese and putting the other piece of french toast on top like a sandwich.

Finish it all off with a dollop of blueberry cream cheese on the top, some fresh blueberries and some syrup - golden or maple, your choice.

I think when Adam and I get married we should change our name to Mr and Mrs Wandering.

It seems like every time we go on holiday, we kind of forget to plan it. I mean, we plan where we're going to go as in what country, region, town, accommodation - that's the bit I find stressful. But what we do when we get there? That's usually left up to chance. Which I love, it's my favourite way to travel, the real adventuring kind. Set out in a car or on foot and just get lost.

Some of the places we ended up while traveling in Tuscany, I can't even remember the name of. We went from town to town, walked up the highest hills around and back down again to pinpoint another location on the map and say "let's go there!"... "sure why not".

My mum gave us some Tuscany guide books and we didn't open them until the night before when we were sitting around the fire thinking about what to do the next day.

I've traveled with people who want to tick off all the land marks, all the museums, all the sights to see. It's not for me I don't think. Having no plan can be a bit on the stressful side, don't get me wrong, but it does mean that you occasionally stumble across a real gem.

What kind of traveler are you? Are you a planner, or do you just wing it?

Happy Birthday to my love today, and to him I wish all the happiness in the world.

I love him because he was my first love.

Because he's just as cheeky and fully of crazy ideas now as he was when we were little.

Because the quote "whoever you are, I always depend on the kindness of strangers" I truly believe was written about him - he is always there when a mother needs help carrying her pram, or a stranger needs directions. He can't help himself, he always needs to help.

Because he has a genuine fear of zombies but he can't stop watching zombie shows, and he loves it when when I do my zombie impression (just not immediately after watching said zombie shows).

Because I never stop finding new things to love about him, and he never stops surprising me.

Because his optimism and encouragement is endless.

Because he takes an interest in everything that is important to me.

Because he is fiercely protective of my best friends.

Because he takes a simple, peaceful approach to life - he keeps my feet on the ground.

Because he is ambitious and works so hard.

Because he squeezes the toothpaste tube from the middle, just like me.

Because he is just too handsome for words.

Because he is hilarious and has such a clever sense of humor.

Because he's always starting dance parties in the kitchen.

Because he always tries to help even if he has no idea what he's doing.

Because he is my best friend.

Because he is my soon-to-be husband and he get's SO happy whenever I point that out which is just the most amazing feeling in the world.

It all started on Friday night where I had the flat to myself for the first time in forever. I lazed around, did face masks, played a game of UNO with Molly (ok maybe that didn't happen), watched movies, it was pure bliss.

On Saturday Adam announced that he was going to learn to bake bread, so we went to Broadway Market to get some ingredinets. He hunted around for fresh rosemary while I hung out under an umbrella, watching the world go by and drinking hot apple juice.

In the evening we went to Street Feast at Hawker House, and it was my favourite pop-up food market experience so far. We got there early and found a seat in a loft area above Breddos Tacos, we sat there all night eating ribs, burgers, steamed buns and drinking lots and lots of hot apple cider and hot buttered rum. It was smokey but so much fun to just chat and people watch for hours, eating and drinking the whole time.

The next day, we woke up smelling a bit like we had slept in a BBQ pit and we were eager to get out and enjoy the sunshine. Some of us also needed to walk off some of that hot buttered rum, but I won't say who...

We drove to Epping Forest and walked for four hours in the sunshine, stopping off to catch our breath and refuel with a cup of tea. We came home to bowls full of steaming venison stew and hot apple crumble with custard for pudding. Before bed we watched The Untouchables, and if you haven't seen it you really must! It was such a happy film.

More weekends like this please! How was yours? If only Mondays were Fridays, right?

I'm going to be honest with you. Marriage is not something I ever really planned for. Commitment? Yes. Loyalty? Absolutely. Romance? Always. Being with the same person forever? That is absolutely for me. But I never really felt like I needed to be married to make those things happen. I mean, I love weddings, I love celebrating with people who choose to get married, but I never felt like I needed it for myself. Does that make sense?

But being married matters to Adam. It doesn't matter why, but if it matters to him it matters to me. And as I'm not opposed to marriage exactly, I thought I would just let our relationship progress naturally. We talked about marriage and getting engaged, but I never put any pressure on him to hurry up and ask me. But as things did progress in our relationship I started to get nervous, almost as though I was anticipating a proposal. I thought maybe I was a big commitment-phobe after all!

I was scared, if I'm honest - not of being with Adam forever though, I knew almost from the first moment that I wanted to be with him. I can't pin down what it is that I was scared of exactly, but when I cottoned on that the proposal was going to happen I was a bundle of nerves.

Then one day I met Lulu at a blogger event and we got to talking about marriage. She had recently had her wedding and explained to me how she felt about the whole business. She said that when you become engaged you start to feel a wonderful kind of security - when you didn't even know you were feeling insecure! She talked all about how being married is just great. And her enthusiasm for it was infectious! (I don't think she even knows how much that conversation helped me - thanks Lulu!)

And now that I'm on the other side, and Adam and I are engaged, I understand what she was talking about. It's not a "thank goodness I finally have a man to take care of me" sense of security. It's a, "ok I was right, he does genuinely does love me and want to be with me forever" kind of feeling. Kind of like a confirmation of what I always believed.

It's all very hard to explain, but it's a lovely to feel settled and secure, and I'm really enjoying it.

We haven't started too much on the wedding planning yet, and I promise this won't turn into a wedding planning blog, but I can share a few bits with you if you like?

What with family here and there, most of our holidays are taken up with visits to Toronto, or Zurich, or even right here in England. So when Adam and I finally hit the road on our own, in our little rented Fiat 500, we were beyond excited! We've travelled a lot as individuals, but we haven't been to many new places as a couple and it was such an amazing feeling to set out on our own to explore Tuscany.

And I have to say, I was nervous to drive on the right side of the road for the first time in eleven years (!!!) but I totally nailed it! With lots and lots of helpful reminders from Adam.

We stayed in this little AirBnb flat, and it was just so wonderful. The owner, Maria, was so welcoming and generous. She left us a bottle of wine and some of her homemade honey, she even opened up her own dining room so that we could use the fireplace on chilly evenings.

It was so homely and just wonderful to have somewhere more personal to come home to every day, much better than a hotel. And it allowed us to cooked for ourselves most nights because I couldn't wait to get my hands on all the fresh ingredients that Tuscany has to offer.

Lately I've developed a sense of determination to bring peace to my life. A feeling of comfort and contentedness. To feel rested, and happy, and to make conscious decisions to do things that I know I'll really love, like celebrate Halloween, instead of doing things just do keep busy. Why do we always need to be so busy?! I find I just say yes to everything and anything, which is great for having new experiences, but it has become a habit and I've definitely said yes to some things lately that I should have said no to. Do you do this too?

I was meant to be on a work trip this week but it got canceled at the last minute for security reasons, as a result I feel like I've gained time - a whole week! I have no plans at all and it feels amazing. I spent all last weekend at home, in my pajamas, doing relaxing things like reading, knitting, a bit of organising, watching movies... I can't remember the last time I had a weekend that wasn't completely full of things to do and people to see.

I've been adding to my >>Life<< board on Pinterest a lot these days, and it's become a real place of inspiration - somewhere to go and rest my eyes late at night when I can't sleep and I need to find some calm. I suppose it's a collection of what I'm working towards, not the reality of the pictures, but the sense of happy calm they give me.

*I'm not sure where most of these photos come from so if you recognize any of them let me know so I can link them up to their rightful owners.

It's been a long time since I've done anything for Halloween. Too long! It was my absolute favourite holiday when I was little and I would plan my costume for months and months beforehand.

When I moved to England I quickly realised that Halloween is not celebrated here like it is in Canada. When I was little we went all out with costumes and candy - it was serious business. I loved it. I loved wearing my costume to school. I loved pretending to be spooky for a day, I think I even loved it more than Christmas, and that's saying something!

This year I wanted to bring a little bit of that trick-or-treating magic to my neighborhood. Part of me didn't expect anyone to show up, and Adam suspected we would be eating all the sweets ourselves over the coming weeks. But we were hopeful...

Last night I ran home to put my pumpkins out early so the kids would know that at least one house on our street was getting in the spirit. All was quiet for a bit, and then suddenly Molly was barking at the door and didn't stop for about three hours - we had LOADS of trick-or-treaters. We had some little baby skeletons that could only whisper a small, scared "trick-or-treat". Some big kids who just had a mask and a plastic shopping bag. We even had some kids who made elaborate costume themselves and tried to bargain for how much candy they got (no you cannot trade that refresher for some smarties, but points for effort!).

I invited my friends Eve and Emma over to help me give out the candy and hold Molly back from charging at the kids, trying to make friends. Adam was out for the night so I made tomato bat blood soup in a bread brain bowl for three, and we had a great evening talking about our spooky experiences (like that time Emma saw a ghost!) and laughing the costumes and the cheekiness of the trick-or-treaters.

We ended the night munching on toasted pumpkinseeds zombie fingernails, huddled on the sofa watching Hocus Pocus until Adam came home and scared the life out of us by jumping at the window. It was the best Halloween I've had in years and I wish I could do it again tonight and every night!

Before Adam and I went to Italy we couldn't decide where to stay. We knew we would be in Lucca but we couldn't figure out if we wanted a country break or a city break. We didn't booked our accommodation until the last minute because we were so indecisive - but by the time the holiday came around we were so in need of some rest and relaxation just the two of us, we opted for a remote country cottage.

We stayed with Adam's sister and her family for a couple of nights in Buti and it was the perfect start to our country vacation. Their cottage was so remote in the Tuscan countryside, and so high up on a hilltop somewhere that they regretted not hiring a truck to get them up and down the dirt track.

When we arrived late at night I whipped out my camera and couldn't help but photograph everything. It was so beautiful and dreamy in the dusk and the fog. We sat around drinking wine and chatting until late, but woke up early ready to explore. Adam and I grabbed our coffees and went for a wander through the olive trees and to check out the view.

There's something about Tuscany that simply demands a feeling of relaxation and indulgence. Everything is so beautiful, there's so much food to be eaten and wine to be drunk. It's just impossible not to feel content.

Right about the time I started peeking into the blogging world, Kinfolk was just emerging as an awesome new magazine - so in blogger years, I've kind of grown up with them.

The simplicity and beauty they communicate to the world through their publication and their website is enchanting - it's downright addictive! It makes you say "I want some of that in my life!". Well, it does to me anyway.

So when I heard they were coming out with a cookbook, I just knew it was going to be wonderful. I'm working on reading it cover to cover at the moment, and I'm so looking forward to trying out some of the recipes.

Some weeks it's hard to find a moment to pause and think about what's going on, everything mixes together and it's hard to tell the good from the bad. So this weekend I made a real effort to do some fun stuff and create some good moments.

This year Adam and I have decided to do Halloween properly. We bought some pumpkins and soon we'll get some candy - I really hope we get some trick-or-treaters. I even bought a "scary" movie to watch and I can't wait, Halloween used to be my favourite holiday when I was little and I've been neglecting these past few years.

I've been loving walks with Molly lately, I look forward to an hour in the park every day especially after spending all day in the office. The air is so fresh and everything looks so pretty with leaves everywhere - I wish I could spend all day every day outside in my wellies.

Chips in a paper wrapper eaten outside just before it rains, covered in salt and vinegar. The tastiest chips I've had in a very long time.

I'm planning on starting a winter garden on my back porch with a few herbs and plants that won't mind the cold. I've started with this heather and I'm hoping to get some rosemary and thyme - do you have any advice on plants that will survive the winter?

I'm so happy that it's stew season again. My Mum practically raised us on stews and I love making a massive one on a Sunday and having it last all week long - I never get tired of it and thankfully neither does Adam. This is a slow cooked venison stew with dumplings, so yummy.

Another moment not pictured because I forgot my camera card: spending Sunday with some of my favourite blogger friends running around Shoreditch on The Photo Hunt, an event organised by some more of my favourite blogger friends. And we won! Go team Drunken Reindeers!

It was a tough week, that's for sure, but it was a good weekend that more than made up for it. Now Adam and I are sat on the sofa watching Ghost Busters and planning on getting an early night. What was the best moment from your week?

Molly is settling in really well. She is such a nervous pup that it took a long time for her to feel at home, and not afraid of everything.

But now that she is feeling more comfortable her personality is really coming out and we're discovering that she's so playful and loving. She captures the heart of everyone she meets.

She's really uncoordinated so when she runs and plays with the ball she's all legs and ears flying everywhere. Other dogs like to chase her and nip at her back legs, my theory is that they are mistaking her for a sheep and are trying to herd her.
We took her to the countryside to visit my mum this past weekend and she loved it! She was so distracted by the smells and chasing rabbits that she nearly got herself lost a couple of times. At one point she was so fixed on sniffing the ground as she ran along that she ran headlong into a fence! And even though she has always been really afraid of the car, by the end of the weekend she could hardly contain her excitement when asked to climb in the back seat - I think because she knew she was going somewhere fun. Her favorite road trip pastimes are barking at the satnav, and barking and other people in their cars on the motorway.

She is also really good at giving fashion advice. Today I held two jumpers in front of her and asked her which I should wear - she had a good sniff of the brown one, but then nudged the yellow and poked it with her paw. She certainly has an opinion!

Other things that Molly loves: tennis balls, not just regular balls, they have to be tennis balls. Kicking fallen leaves with her front paws in the park and then prancing around them a bit. Her teddy, she has so much love for that thing even though she's chewed its face off. Trying to crawl into your lap for cuddles (she's far too big for this). Smooshing her face against yours when she knows she's done something wrong, I bet she thinks this is endearing. Shoving her whole face in her water bowl and drooling all over the flat. Yawning really loudly. Greeting everyone in the park who stands still long enough. Having her lead on in the flat and walking herself around with the handle end in her mouth. And Biscuit Bill, who always has a biscuit for all the dogs in the park.

Time keeps running away from me! Every day I mean to write a blog post, then I blink and suddenly it's 11:30 at night, my hair is frazzled, my clothes slightly askew, and I'm at a loss as to where the day has gone. I'm in serious need of a moment to come back down to earth. I hate the feeling of rushing through life, and not taking a moment to enjoy it!

Which is in stark contrast to what I was doing this time two weeks ago... When we were flying from London to Pisa, I found out that Adam had one last surprise up his sleeve. I told me mid-air that we weren't going where I thought we were going for our first night in Italy, but he had actually booked us into a spa! We going to spend the next two days floating in thermal waters, having massages, and balancing out all that goodness with wine, pasta and gelato!

We stayed in the Bagni di Pisa Palace, where they gave us an upgraded room and free passes to the spa. It was all very swish!

After floating in the waters until we were all pruney, Adam asked at reception where we should have dinner. Naturally the recommended the hotel restaurant, because as it turns out there was only one other restaurant in the town. We opted for the one other restaurant and I'm pretty sure it was the best meal we had the whole time we were in Italy, though when we drank some of their water and said "this tastes amazing!!!", we became a bit suspicious that we were just on cloud nine and anything would have tasted amazing and been the "best ever" at that point.

As everything was in Italian, and neither of us speak Italian, we pulled the old What's Her Face from Eat, Pray, Love trick and asked for the best dish on the menue. We weren't disappointed - but who can be with pasta?

The next day, we hopped on a train the Pisa! But more to come on that soon. I promise!

(Every photo was taken by Michelle from My Creative - I am so grateful for her being there and bringing her camera to capture such priceless moments)

I had known for quite a while that Adam was planning a birthday party for me, mostly because he had asked me for a list of invites. But I didn't know that it was also going to be an engagement celebration! I suspected a lot, but I didn't know anything for sure so my imagination was running wild.

But the reality was much better than anything I had dreamed of! I Bought a pretty new dress from asos, had a mini champagne celebration at home with my mum and Adam's parents (who had flown over to celebrate with us!) - and then Adam had me hop into a cab and put on a blindfold.

After driving down a bumpy road, climbing some steps and trying not to fall over, Adam uncovered my eyes and everyone yelled a big "SURPRISE!!!". Adam thanked everyone for coming and then said that he had asked me to marry him and I had said "yes" (the classic Adam double-bluff) - then there was a massive cheer and everyone ran over to hug us. That will go down in my little history as one of the best moments of my life.

My mum and Adam's parents had decorated the place beautifully. Our friend Lauren made the most amazing bunting I have ever ever seen, with pictures of all my favourite things hanging from it: Molly, a horse, a DAVIDsTEA mug, a camera, a tube sign with London Fields on it, a bowl of pho and a picture of Poirot - kind of weird that last one, I know, but I'll explain another time.

We partied at the Redchurch Brewery until the wee hours with all our friends. Blogger friends, uni friends, school friends, work friends, old flat mates, everyone! The brewery is located in a railway arch under the Liverpool Street to London Fields line and the beer they make tastes so good - Adam even bought a keg of beer and named it Freya's Birthday Brew. He also hired a food truck!!!! The amazing Rainbo who make delicious gyoza and donate 20p from every meal they sell towards ending child labor. Amazing!! They gave us a free bottle of sake (my favourite). Oh and they blog. My kind of food van! Adam could not have done better.

And on top of everything else, Adam also arranged skype calls with my best friends in Canada, and one in Korea, as well as my dad, so that I could tell them the amazing news!

The next day we had a family pizza celebration at Sweet Thursday, and the day after we were on a flight to Italy.

I still can't believe it. I really really can't. But I do know how incredibly lucky I am to be so loved by such a wonderful man.

So much has happened in the past week or so that it would be impossible to pick just five amazing moments. Obviously getting engaged is the best moment, but here are a few little ones from Italy that were pretty great.

Our first night in Italy, Adam surprised me by taking me to a spa! We spent two days floating in thermal waters, I had a massage and also a scrub... I don't think I've ever felt so relaxed and happy.

Just spending time with Adam, exploring a new country and getting used to the fact that we're actually going to be married some day soon!

We got to spend some time with Adam's sister, her husband and baby Felix in Italy too. They were there with family on holiday and we had such a fun time with them - and baby Felix has the most infectious little giggle.

Gelato! Summer was most definitely over in Tuscany but that didn't stop us from cramming in as much gelato as we possibly could.

One of the best moments was when we explored this little town on the side of a mountain. There were more cats living there than people! But more on that soon.

Have you had a good week? What was your best moment? I feel like I've been away for ages and haven't had any time to catch up with other blogs - send me your links?

That's how I spent my birthday yesterday. With that view, watching the sun go down, having a cup of tea with my new fiancé (holy crumbs! that's going to take some getting used to).

At this very moment I am sitting by a fire, in the middle of Tuscany, in a little cottage, in a tiny town called Benabbio which sits at the end of a very steep and winding road. The wind is rushing around the hills, the rain is falling hard, Adam is in the next room planning tomorrow's adventure, and I don't think I have ever been so comfortable or so happy.

We have only a day left in Italy but already it feels like we have been here for weeks - we have done so much. And I have so much to catch up on! Prepare yourselves for London posts, engagement posts, party posts, birthday posts, travel posts, and much much more over the coming weeks.

It happened on Friday night just before a big surprise birthday celebration that Adam organised for me - and we have been celebrating ever since! Friends and family have flown to London to be with us, and we are just so so happy.

And at this moment we are on a flight to Italy to carry on celebrating even more!

I can't wait to share all the photos with you (taken by the amazingly talented Michelle) and tell you all about it soon. Adam went above and beyond to make it all perfect and such a special evening.

Thank you for being patient with me, for all your kind words and good advice. I've spent time with good friends, family, and on my own with Adam - trying to gain some clarity on how much my life has changed over the past few months.

I've often been told that I'm too sensitive, and that I think too much. This is probably true, as it takes me longer to shake things off than what seems normal. But I am a determined little thing, and I have my heart set on happiness. Troubles come and go, and life can be just so painful at times, but there's no pause button and no other option but to just keep going - figuring it out along the way.

Keep those you love safe in your heart, and there they will remain no matter what happens. Then get up, get dressed, and go see some of your loveliest friends for a chat and a laugh. There's no better medicine, no matter how rubbish you're feeling.