We lie to you. We're selling a product - the sex, the persona, whatever. Like actors do press tours, everything a porn star (or any other king of sex worker) does on social media is advertising to convince you to buy. So we tell you we love it, that we're all a happy family, that we think you're great and thank you for supporting us. Anything to make you click and pay. You would think I wouldn't have to say this but unfortunately you're wrong. It's not real a huge amount of the time. We are paid to lie and behind the scenes it can be very pressurised if you even let a little bit slip that makes things sound less than 100% happy-go-lucky sluts. It's incredibly stressful if you experience a scene you don't want to do but can't really tell anyone because people get pissed off when you ruin their fantasies or they don't believe you because of the lies the industry sells that we're all about sex all the time.

So much abuse. Drug abuse, emotional blackmail. Rape is more common than anyone wants to acknowledge and one of the things that made me quit and get intense therapy was the knowledge of how many rape scenes are real. I experienced what was packaged as a "rough sex" scene, I had bruising and tears and it was traumatising. I cried in the scene because my partner (who had his own issues to be fair) was too big for me and not acting his roughness. Our buyers enjoyed it, I was told.

There are so many victims stuck in the industry. You don't know right away but then you talk, or you watch in between filming and you just know, you hear the rumors .... Buyers have no idea except in the back of their minds that there are so many abused people stuck in the industry, and they don't want to think about it because it ruins the fantasy. But you have no idea what it does to you when you meet a very young guy glazed out of his poor mind on god knows what, needing drugs to get hard, and underneath it all you realize he's scared and ashamed. Or the women who do so many scenes but who barely see any money from it, kept poor because keeping them poor keeps them stuck in the industry.

A lot of people work sick. Which is just uncomfortable. So many scenes where someone is hurling into a bucket off camera or running into the bathroom. Fainting isn't uncommon. Weird sensations like numbness or tight chests or muscles which I guess is drugs or stress or exhaustion.

Other "stars" can be worse than the staff. Because if you make the industry look bad, people start asking questions, they might lose buyers and money. They can push you more and sometimes get away with more under the guise of "encouragement" or "protecting [their] image".

Young men from all over Asia are heavily exploited. It breaks my heart. So many of these guys are so young and poor and put into uncomfortable gay male scenes.

The trends towards extremer and extremer acts is disturbing and makes me glad I am safe from it. It's worst in gay male & straight scenes. I have no experience of the former because I'm not a guy, but I've heard stories and scene enough footage. It's just not healthy, emotionally or physically, where things are going. People have become normalised and desensitised to previous stuff, it's not enough for them, or it gives them the taste for more. So now gaping, extreme stretching and prolapse porn is a very "hot" trend.

When you say this stuff people send you death threats and rape threats, doesn't matter if you're a guy or girl. You get told the most vilest things. People are terrified of getting violent threats if they speak out about.

We lie to you. We're selling a product - the sex, the persona, whatever. Like actors do press tours, everything a porn star (or any other king of sex worker) does on social media is advertising to convince you to buy. So we tell you we love it, that we're all a happy family, that we think you're great and thank you for supporting us. Anything to make you click and pay. You would think I wouldn't have to say this but unfortunately you're wrong. It's not real a huge amount of the time.

Yeah, it's surprising to me when people are like "but Star Y on this podcast talks about how awesome the industry is and how she loves her coworkers etc etc etc". Yeah, no shit. She might be telling the truth, but why do you trust her? She's 100% incentivized to make things sound great.

A surprising number of older guys are quite happy having a young attractive women even pretend to like them or be interested for a bit.

Some strippers pull in quite good money being a scanty clad therapist. Her impression was a fair number of dudes just are in environments where they can't just unwind and talk, and it's really hard to be less threatening then that.

Now the places where it's pole/stage dancing only I agree with ya. Been in one of those once a decade ago and no interest again.

When I end up at strip clubs I tend to do more people watching than anything else. My friends will be all at the stage the whole time and I'll take some time to watch the customers and workers. You notice a lot when you see a girl's face when shes not interacting with customers. Some are always happy and seem like their enjoying it but others just deflate until the next interaction.

I've known a few strippers personally and they all tell me they enjoy it and do it because they want to, not because they have to, and I believe them. But I feel so many are there because they think its the best way to make money.

I know some strippers and they did sometimes have great nights where they talked to some decent guys and enjoyed the compliments and looking sexy and dancing. Also free drinks and drugs. Even had a stripper bring back 3 guys who were over from America to my house because she liked them. Very against the rules but she was young and kinda stupid/lots of mdma. Most the time though yeah they don't like you unless you have a lot of money.

Also as a side note if you are going to a strip club don't fuck the girls around they don't get paid unless you pay them and they also have to pay the club to work there. Don't chat for 15 minutes then be like "nah I don't want a dance" just tell them right away they won't be offended.

I've gone to a strip club something like 3-4 times in my life. I think it's because the first time I went I was with a co-worker. I was 20-21 chubby nerd, he was 100. Ok, probably was super old at 32, but we thought he was old. He was bald.

Just so happen 2 strippers came up to us and started talking to us. One just happened you love bald dudes. The other loved thick guys. I was young punk, sure, but that seemed an unlikely encounter in the wild.

And why are the strippers always going to college for something insane, like PhD in Neuro biology. Like sure, I'll agree I may have met one, but if the cost of school for that particular doctorate is so high that I meet 3 girls all going for it? And you're not even close up a college that offers it? Man, just tell me you dance, or your learning welding. Don't go over the top on me

I've gone maybe a dozen times with two different friends. They knew I wasn't really into that scene for the same reason, so the general agreement was that they paid for everything except my drinks, and I kept the bill reasonable. It always felt far too business like for me. If you're going to try to convince me that you actually give a shit about me then you're gonna have to work at it dammit. The people watching in those places is awesome, especially in the high rent joints. The skeezy places are just...gross. But the nice ones? Met a couple pretty cool chicks in there. Once they've established that you're not a creep, and you're not paying them for anything, occasionally they'll stop by just to get a few minutes off their feet, or look busy to get away from someone else.