DP just said he's regretting us being pregnant :(

I'm so upset. DP just said today that he's regretting us falling pregnant and the upheaval/loss of our lives. I'm really hoping he was just voicing his concerns & isn't seriously upset about us being pregnant. Granted bubs was a very big surprise. We'd only been together 6 months when we found out but were already living together. He had seemed excited when I told him. I don't think I'd misinterpreted his feelings either as I was absolutely crapping myself, I already had a 6 yr old and her dad just upped and left when I was 6 mths pregnant so already had all of those fears in the back of my mind.
He's back in his hometown in NSW running his dads company as his dads wife is due to have a baby anyway now, so I can't really talk to him properly about it all as I'm in SA.
I just don't know what to do. Should I just pretend he never said any of it & move on. Should I be concerned? He'll be home late next week so by the time he gets back I dunno if it's worth talking to him about it.
Sorry about the scattered post, just really emotional.

I think it's worth talking about it.. if you dont you'll have the doubt in your mind that he's not that keen.. It's always a good thing to talk about it.. wait til he gets back or if your really upset give him a call ask him when would be a good time to talk and talk about it then.. but try and wait til he's back.. these things are often done best face to face.

It's normal for people to regret the loss one part of their life as they move on to another.. is this his first kid? if so it's going to be a big deal for him becoming a dad and he may have concerns for the relationship..

History doesn't necessarily need to repeat it's self like it did with your ex (DD's daddy).. it has the chance of going well.. it might just be him expressing himself.. not all feelings are nice to hear. you may need to open up to him about yours too so he knows this might be a sensitive one for you as you might be afraid he'll do what history has done to you before.

good luck.. I'm sure he's just being a bloke and voicing feelings without thinking first... talk about it together and see where you both stand..
((hugs)).

talk to him and express how you feel and listen to him also. If this is his 1st child he may just be scared or worried how much your lives will change, in a good way though. Children are a blessing they are very hatd work at times but they are still worth it. I have a toddler, 4 stepsons and twins on the way omg it can be a handful at times but there are alot of good times too. good luck hun

I agree, you should definitely talk about it with him when he gets home. My partner had alot of doubts when under stress or emotional. I think its a bloke thing, And i know how hard that can be. And im glad he expressed them too me. I too had not been with my DP for long when we found out we were pregnant, only 2 months to be exact. There were ALOT of ups and downs but once he held his baby girl for the first time he didnt want it any other way, and look at us now.. 5 years later and number 3 on the way :) Everything will be alright hun. Must be just as scary for them as it is for us, of only they could experience what we feel. Xx

My husband and I have both had doubts about me being pregnant - and this was completely planned! It's just a shock to how much your lives are going to change. I've even said I've regretted getting pregnant because the pregnancy has been so hard on me (lots of anxiety and depression). In fact, I had always wanted two kids, but we are both now seriously considering only having one. HOWEVER, we are both really excited about having a baby and being parents. Sometimes it's just hard. These things tend to come up when we are both stressed and I think that's understandable and normal. All of my mom friends I have talked to said they had doubts the first time they were pregnant. I think it's something you should definitely talk about when he gets back, but I don't think it necessarily means that he really wishes you weren't pregnant. Good luck!!

Thanks ladies. I really appreciate being able to come on here and talk to you all. It's not exactly a topic you want to bring up with close friends & family.
We have had a bit of a chat about things but I'm still a little worried, probably will be until he's home.
He said he never meant he didn't want our baby or that he didn't love me, just that he wished we'd had more time alone before this one came along. He said he's missed me like crazy but really enjoyed being able to catch up & have a drink with his old mates and he knows he won't be able to do that so freely when little miss comes along. I completely understand him feeling that way, I miss my independence after having miss 6 but I wouldn't change it for the world. I think I've gotten so upset because of my past and also because we haven't seen each other in such a long time, I feel a bit like I've lost "us" if that makes sense.

It sounds like he is having perfectly natural feelings (you've maybe had them too?), especially given you got pregnant so soon into the relationship. What I'm mainly thinking though is that you've got yourself a good guy who will talk, open up and not keep it to himself - it sounds like a very open, honest relationship you have there!

I agree with laurasophia5... I'm glad you both talked and it went well although it's left you a little worried it sounds like it went Ok..Also it sounds like your ready to move on from your past a bit which is why it came up and you worked out exactly what it was?.. never would have happened if you were not ready.. not a nice experience but the more this happens the more we move forward from things rather than act unconsciously and end relationships or sabotage them without knowing why... I think you and your guy will work it all out.. it's never easy when stuff like this comes up so just take it easy for a few days... but now you know what it is and you'll spot it's wooly head when it pops up again. Just remember to acknowledge it and talk about it next time you see the wooly bugger....

I am the partner of a pregnant mum to be... we are a same sex couple and I am finding it very difficult coping with her tiredness, moods and lack of physical contact. I already have two children and I'm 10 years older than her and when we started a relationship I made it clear I didn't want any more children but over the past three years her longing for a child became stronger and I fell in love with her so I have had to adjust and basically give in or lose her.
It's a difficult situation now because she is over the moon with happiness and so is her whole family.. I on the other hand am just starting to see how we quickly are going to fall apart since what I really want is my life to head in a different direction.
It's a difficult situation and one of mixed emotions. I'm lost and confused.
I think talk and talk and talk... there can never be enough of it.
Things have a way of working themselves out. Hope it all works out for you x

good luck and all the best, Im sure that things will get better as kids are a true blessing. She just needs some reasurance that you still love her and that you are happy. Maybe try to have some time out together and just talk be open and honest about how you both feel.

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