I get so sad when I see my other friends getting pregnant and having children. I had waited so long to finally have a child. My pregnancy experience was such a tragedy. I just wonder why some women have so many problems or complications trying to have them and others have none at all. Just doesn't seem fair at times that all women can't have a healthy pregnancy. I am happy for those that do, but I can still only think about my situation and the fact that I didn't and it hurts enormously.

I know. I work with someone who is due in Feb. I was due in January. It sucks, bigtime! Today she actually whined to me that she was tired and sick of going to the doctor. It took a lot of restraint not to smack her.

There is just no ryhme or reason why this happened to us, it is totally unfair and reminds us just how random life can be. I've started receiving christmas cards from friends who had their first babies around the same time mine was due and I find that incredibly painful - because they now sign them from their babieso too. I don't like seeing pregnant women that much either, but its the small babies that really hurt, especially if they are girls

Yes, jules it is so very painful. One of my students brought her nephew into my office and he was eight months old. Olivia would have been a little over six months old and it just broke my heart. My heart feels so empty without her. It's just such an indescribabal loss. Olivia was very small when she born and after she passed away I often would dream of very small babies that could fit in envelopes or babies who were smaller than matchbox cars. They were just really bizarre dreams that I had associated with Olivia. If I see a small baby my heart still breaks because it brings back all the pain we expererienced when we lost her. I just dont know if I will ever truly get over loosing her. I cry for her almost everynight.

My gosh, this post made me want to cry, yet im just numb right now. I thought maybe I was the only one feeling this way. I came up yestday morning to Pennsylvania with my sister because I wasn't doing well back at my home (iwith my family im 22) im not working right now or going to school, and well after my mom dropped us off at airport, I started to cry because I had Naomi in my hands (in her little box, I had to bring her with me) and then we got to our gate, go figures, there was about an 9 or 10 month old baby girl on our flight, thank God we were able to go fist class. I saw her with her daddy smiling I jumped up and had to walk around the airport until we boarded. Then I got on the airplane and started crying I couldn't hold it because I thought I shouldn't be on here ishould be with Naomi. No one seems to understand. Even my friend Kylee asked me one day last week if I wanted to go to the beach iwht her and her niece, who isl ike 10 months old. I saw her in the hospital (after she was born) and I was still pregnant about 20 weeks. Does she not know I can't be around babies esp girls? It upset me so much I told her I can't do that. Wherever you go "you can't get away" from the pain I try and tell people. I haven't been out of state since Naomi passed, & its just killing me. I miss her so much. Especially now during the holidays. I sleep because I don't feel the pain, as I get up, im empty again. RIP my beautiful angel & all of you are in my thoughts, I really hate this horrible horrible disease.

This is def a very hard thing.
I should be 34 weeks pregnant today and its been 2 months since I delivered my son stillborn after being on bedrest for over 2 months. Seeing women who dont value how much of a miracle bring a baby into the world is and how fragile it is just breaks my heart. I went to my Church for the 1st time since I had Anthon, everyone there seemed to either be Pregnant, have a newborn and even both. I hate to leave cause it seems like every where I go I see pregnant women and Ive seen a few smoking which I just want to go over and yell at them when I see that. I did everything I was supposed to do for my babies. I went to every OB appt, was seen every 2 or 3 weeks from the day I found out I was pregnant and I turned out to only be 3 weeks along when I found out and seeing the best Peri's in Arizona, which I had had a pre-pregnancy consult with months before I got Pregnant to make sure it was OK.
I am so sorry you are going thru this.

Y'all are definitly not alone and this is totally normal. As I type this I am angered because I had my second miscarriage just yesterday. It's weird, all I want to do is be on here and on americanpregnancyassociation.com. I am assuming for hope, but you would think I would want to be far away from those sites. I cried a lot yesterday, but today just feel kinda numb. It's so hard, at least we all have each other!!
HUGS
Malia

It has been 1 year and almost two months since I lost Jasper and it still feels like I am being kicked in the stomach every time I see a pregnant woman. I also feel like I'm being kicked in the stomach when someone mentions they got their BFP. After having 4+ years of Infertility finally getting pg and losing my son to Pre-e and HELLP doesn't help.