Calling my parents to let them know of our plans to see my parents over the Christmas break, they could barely contain their excitement. And it wasn’t so much over the actual visit but more to do with the delight of what they had bought for the kids.

“Just you wait until you see what we got you!” my mother would say to my twin sons in her sing-song voice, like she was dangling a huge carrot.

I would sigh in frustration but also with surrender. So many times, there were arguments about the constant giving of extravagant gifts – expensive remote toy cars, scooters. With every visit and special occasion the presents seem to just get bigger and flashier.

So when I saw the expensive bright shiny red Mini Cooper S “mini”cars – one for each twin – parked and waiting for my boys to ride them, I knew it was a losing battle.

Do I just give in now? Or do I mention to my parents, yet again how hard I try as a parent to keep my boys grounded and gracious; that presents such as these are not helping my cause at all.

Despite her son being the only grandchild, and spoilt accordingly by her mother, Tegan from Far North Queensland also thinks it’s important for a parent’s wishes to be respected by grandparents.

“My parents absolutely spoil my son but my mum always checks with me about the bigger stuff and if I say no, then she respects that.”

Let’s face it. Size matters.

South Coast mum of two, Jen recalls when she told her mum repeatedly to stick to small presents to cater to their small place.

Instead, her mum bought an entire toy kitchen set, including oven, stove and fridge, leaving very little left for their tiny lounge room.

Then there’s that little game of favourites. Sydney mum Stephanie fondly remembers her own mother and Nan spoiling her to bits.

However, when it comes to her own children, her mother has her two favourites and leaves the others out. Now teenagers, there’s sadly very little love between them and their inequitable grandmother.

Mrs P has a similar issue with her step mum who clearly goes OTT with her own grandchildren but sticks to a strict $50 limit with her step granddaughters.

Looking from a grandparent’s perspective, Denyse loves spending the time “seeking out of ideas and fun of putting the gifts together”. From movie vouchers to homemade envelopes with cash, the grandma of eight says, “I couldn’t be happier at how the each enjoy their surprises”.

Maybe my friend Donna, a Canberra mother of three is on to something. Maybe it just comes back to remembering that with thelimited time we have with grandparents, their role is simply “to create amazing memories for us to remember for the rest of our lives.” And as Donna plainly put it “If that means to let them have the joy of giving, then so be it”.

Obviously, there are no ground rules that can be set for grandparents and gift giving. From most of the stories portrayed, they most likely wouldn’t pay attention to them anyway.

Besides, each family will have its own unique ideas and conflicting definitions of appropriateness. The different dynamics will also reflect this.

Maybe it’s not about losing the battle with grandparents. Maybe it’s just accepting the complications and knowing that like with most things – including the festive season – it’s all over before we know it. Why spend precious time in angst?

I reached an ultimatum with my folks. The boys get to keep their fancy little cars on the condition that 1) the contraptions stay at my parents’ place as we clearly have NO room and 2) these cars are also presents for their birthday coming up in January.

***This is a review for the Junior Storyteller app. No monetary payment was exchanged. 5 promotional codes were provided for the giveaway. All opinions are, as always, my own***

Like most parents with young children, we find that when it comes to comfort during sickness and a cure for boredom there are 2 things that are indispensable: the iPad and television.

But with all good things in life including an inviting chilled glass of wine, everything has a happy balance; all things in moderation.

Last Monday, I was really looking forward to the Mother’s Day afternoon tea at daycare. All mums were asked to come by 3:15pm, have some fun with the kids in their classroom environment, get to know other mums and have some civilized tea and scones.

Supposedly.

I wouldn’t know. I never got there.

The twinions had other plans.

Seeing Mama at pick up time immediately means home time. And home means kicking back and watching some TV or playing on the iPad until dinner. (Tough life being 4…sheesh).

So, when the usual routine of grabbing their schoolbags and walking to the car didn’t happen, they started to of course, whine.

They were busting for their “computer and TV” time.

The whining turned into rolling around the floor and crying which turned into…well, you know the rest.

When it comes to television, deciding on what’s appropriate and educational can be a straightforward decision. You can never go wrong with ABC 4 Kids. Ever.

And even with movies, it’s a matter of quick channel flicking or simply switching it off.

Finding the right apps for the iPad, I’ve discovered, is an entirely different cart of Apples (geddit?)

There’s a plethora of educational apps for young children and so many of them similar to each other. Unfortunately it’s not until you purchase and download the app only to determine its true educational value.

I also think it can be a bit of a joke when providers claim their app for children is “interactive”.

I thought interactive meant “communication” and “discussion” rather than having a computer voice tell a child to press a button or swipe a picture without said child uttering a single word.

Junior Storytellers is something unique, though. And yes, in the true sense of the word, it is interactive.

First conceived in 2006 by writer and blogger, Maria Tedeschi from Mums Word, Junior Storytellers is designed for children from 4 to 9 years to create their own stories but to also record them.

A child can design their own setting and characters then also choose the character’s emotions.

By giving children options to create and animate their own stories, you can see how Junior Storytellers encourages imagination, creativity and language development.

The twinions are at a stage where they love telling stories.

An app like Junior Storytellers can assist them in expanding their interests and also encourage them to create their own stories, independent from what they’ve already seen or played with (namely, dinosaurs and trains…and did I mention dinosaurs???)

And how fun that we can record their little milestones?

The actual app is a free download but to get even more features, there are different price options for the various in-app purchases available. Or there is also the option to buy the entire Story Bundle package ($4.99).

I have Junior Storyteller Story Bundle apps to giveaway to 5 lucky readers!

And while it was all very exciting (especially for Mr Surfer) at first, the reality is that having only one parent speak the second language does add extra responsibility and pressure for said parent.

For the purpose of this post, let me clarify that the term ‘bilingual’ can be wide and varied. Just as ‘fluent’ can be perceived in different ways. However, for me and my family and for now, it simply means to be able to converse and comprehend in another language.

The twinions are picking up Indonesian at an alarmingly fast pace. Their vocabulary is around 100 words, they know how to count to 10, they know about a dozen songs by heart and now they’re stringing sentences together. It’s kinda scary.

They’re becoming so confident, they correct their linguistically impaired father with his pronounciation:

“No Papa. Not ‘Sepe-DA’ (Bike). It’s ‘SE-peda”

During a drive (where I was absent), K-Bear asked his father what ‘house’ was in Indonesian. Catching his father by complete surprise, K-Bear was not satisfied with the “I’m sorry, I don’t know” answer.”

Throughout the entire 20 minute trip, he screamed from his back seat, demanding his father tell him. Right. NOW!!!

Below are some tips for raising bilingual kids when only one parent speaks the second language. It’s all based on experiences, trial, error and the occasional tantrum. (And they’re just the ones from me).

1. Talk to them in the language as much as you can from early on.

From Day 1 in NICU, I would hold the twins and sing to them all the Indonesian nursery rhymes my mother sang to me. Then, when it was just us 3 at home and they were tiny tots, speaking to them in Indonesian felt somewhat strange. Was it soaking it? Was it making any difference? Was I better off talking to a wall?

2. Use resources that work for you.

Books:

We have scoured high and low for books in Bahasa Indonesia and bought a couple from Amazon.com and Asia Bookroom. However, it’s now just easier (and cheaper) to ask my relatives to send some over. It’s generally a hit and miss as some books are too wordy or just too old for them. But we’ll just keep building that library. Just in case.

DVD’s:

We came across a fantastic language DVD resource on a website called Dinolingo.com.

We searched “Bahasa Indonesia for kids” on YouTube and these crazy, random clips of dancing dinosaurs and hippos in balloons appeared…speaking in Indonesian. The boys loved it! So, we went to the website and bought their educational pack, which consists of 5 CD’s and loads of flashcards, posters and other visual aids.

A little pricey (around $150 US) but we’ve definitely seen the value.

The packages are in other languages that aren’t too common like Swahili, Albanian, Tagalog (Filipino) and even Urdu.

Songs:

When my mum made a trip to Indonesia 2 years ago I asked her to bring back DVD’s of Indonesian children’s songs. The great thing about the DVD’s are that not only are they extremely visual, the lyrics appear at the bottom – karaoke style. There are plenty of songs (it’s a 4 DVD set!) I don’t know but because the lyrics are there, I get to learn along with the boys.

Another great educational website is Mama Lisa which has a collection of MP3’s and YouTube videos of children’s songs from all around the world.

3. Have grandparents involved

I’ve specifically asked my parents to only speak Indonesian to the twinion. In fact, over the weekend, mum decided to throw a bit of her own dialect (Batak). The boys took to it like parrots.

I happened to be in the other room when l I could hear my mum counting to 10 in Batak and the boys repeating her. My own childhood memories (especially of getting into trouble) started flowing back when I heard her tell them to “Hatop!” (Hurry up!) and “Unang!” (Don’t do that!)

When their carers at daycare ask the twinions if they’re going to visit their ‘grandparents’, they’ll promptly correct them. No, they say. They’re going to see their ‘Opung’ (Grandma) and ‘Tata’ (Grandpa).

4. Make it part of your daily schedule

When the twinions come home absolutely baked from a full on day at pre-school, we switch on DinoLingo for them to wind down while I cook dinner. So, if we haven’t spoken Bahasa all day, we make sure that there’s at least 30 minutes of it at the end of the day.

5. Fine line between encouraging and “forcing”

My twinions will tell me when they feel like talking in Bahasa and when they don’t.

We can have half an hour straight driving in the car, when the boys will enthusiastically tell me when they see a ‘pohon’ (tree), ‘rumput’ (grass), ‘awan’ (cloud) or the ‘matahari’ (sun).

But then there are moments when it’s a bilingual boycott. Don’t wanna talk. Don’t wanna converse. And that’s cool. Best to just leave it.

The twinions may, or may not keep an interest in learning Bahasa as they get older. What’s most important in exposing them to another language is that, subconsciously, they’re also assimilating into another culture. And if there’s anything they take away from all of this, I hope it’s that; an understanding of their heritage and background.

There are arguments that introducing another language causes confusion and delayed speech. I have my own thoughts about all of that. Best though, to leave it for another post.

Do you speak another language at home? What are your tips? What challenges do you face? Are there any languages you’d like to teach your child/ren?

When it comes to this whole parenting gig, I’m still skeptical of the phrase, “It gets easier”

When? When exactly does it get easier?

When will the sleep deprivation cease? When will my house no longer look like an excerpt from the Guns of Navarone? When will I EVER get to finish a cup of tea???

Almost exactly this time last year, as I was pulling my hair thinking of activities to keep the twinions occupied (without damaging our home), I thought that maybe, just maybe, it was safe to do a little cooking with them.

What was supposed to be a simple pancake making afternoon full of fun and immense joy, turned out to be unstoppable utter madness.

Hardened flour and water all over the kitchen floor and bench tops took two kitchen mop head replacements and weeks to scrub off.

Anywho. Let kitchen craziness bygones be crazy.

Last Sunday, I bit the bullet and made another attempt.

Taking a deep breath, I used my best I’m-a-fun-a-little-too-enthusiastic-mama sing song voice :“Who wants to make pancakes???”

“Me! Me! Meeeee!”

The response was unexpectedly overwhelming. Maybe even scarily so.

Terrified I had just signed myself up to the sequel of “Junior Masterchef Disasters”, I cautiously led them to the kitchen.

And using the hand-me down Junior Masterchef Cooking Kit from a friend, we made special shapes.

“Mickey Mouse” was the big favourite.

Looks like we’ve found ourselves a new Sunday morning activity where the twinions have awesome fun and most importantly, us parents survive the aftermath.

They didn’t taste too bad either.

It’s astounding how things change in a year. And while twin wrangling may not so much be getting “easier” (not yet, anyway), these days, it’s a lot more fun and a lot less messier.

Speaking of fun, I have a fantastic Peppa Pig giveaway!

Peppa Pig Backpack

Peppa Pig Easter Treat

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Peppa is a lovable, cheeky little piggy who lives with her younger brother George, Mummy Pig and Daddy Pig. Peppa loves playing games, dressing up, visiting exciting places and making new friends, but her absolutely favourite thing is jumping up and down in muddy puddles. Her adventures always end happily with loud snorts of laughter. Here’s your chance to win the ultimate Peppa Pig collection, valued at $40 – just in time to celebrate Easter and the holiday season! Check out even more new and exciting products now instore at www.Bigw.com.au. For more info, visit peppapig.com.au I facebook.com/officialpeppapig.au

To enter, all you have to do is leave a comment on this post telling me:

Camping in Yosemite National Park with family, she desperately needed to go to the toilet situated deep in the woods. As her breastfeeding mum was kinda tied up with her little baby brother, she instead gave Anna instructions on how to get there.

Adamant there was a bear down there, Anna didn’t want to go on her own.

But her mum persisted, telling her there was no such creature.

Until an irate adult brought Anna back, wondering who was the irresponsible parent who kept sending their 6 year old to the shower blocks alone?

There was a BEAR down there!!!

This story made Anna come up with the most awesome Mama Mantra I’ve discovered since entering this crazy gig called parenting:

“I tried my best, it wasn’t enough but it could’ve been worse”

So, I’ve thought about mine.

For all the times I’ve clipped the inside of my boys’ legs with their seat belt or almost scalded their mouths with overheated expressed breast milk and for all the future faux pas awaiting ahead:

“I WILL survive this. And one day, I’ll even laugh about it”

What’s your mantra? What’s been one of your epic parenting blunders?

Did your mum make you go down to the toilets when there was a bear down there?

2. Sign up to the awesome Digital Parents community ( if you haven’t already done so). DP was created by Brenda Gaddi who happens to be the creator of FYBF. She’s also created 4 gorgeous kidlets. In case you’d like to know. Or maybe not. But we’ll share that info just the same.

3. Add your post URL to the linky. Please only link up one post.

4. Grab the funky FYBF button and post it on your sidebar. Help spread the blogfloggin love.

Slowly the little lump of boy stirs from the covers but as his eyes eventually open, he affectionately nudges closer in. He reaches over to my shoulder beckoning me to lean in and hug him.

Obliged, I gaze into his tiny face.

In front of me is the magical transformation from new born baby innocence to feisty pre-schooler; all in a blink of an eye.

The days go slow but the years speed past.

And as his long lashes flutter and tickle my cheek, the saying couldn’t hold any more truth.

Early mornings used to carry so much anxiety and stress from the night before. Little sleep caused by the constant worry of work and the heavy burden of trying to be the best in whatever corporate game I was playing at the time.

Terrified that motherhood was possibly not part of the game plan, I wrote in my journal countless pleas to the Greater Universe to grant me one of life’s greatest wishes; I prayed earnestly to the God I believed in for my one final request.

Then the gift of parenting was finally bestowed but the tempestuous journey of trial and error began. Learning to heed to natural instincts while keeping the harsh external judgments at bay. There are days that barely touch the surface of survival but holds the desperate hope that your children don’t detect your weaknesses or your flaws.

After many mornings of being asked, I slowly realized that it wasn’t about emotional scarring or prolonged hurt feelings.

There was actually nothing to feel guilty about.

That’s the stuff us adults – within our tarnished, cynical personal lives – automatically assume because no one ever is genuinely concerned about the state of our disposition anymore. Unless it’s for their own benefit, right?

But his little boy of mine was asking because of his own innocent intentions.

In the midst of chaotic parental duties, ensuring that the children are fed and clothed; keeping up with the milestones and thriving as I unnecessarily compare them to others; there was something far more important my son wanted me to know.

It goes without saying that despite being identical, the twinlets have their own very different personalities.

For some reason though, this fact seems to mind boggle people sometimes. And I guess that’s understandable.

Even from a mother’s perspective, the twinlets aren’t dissimilar in many aspects, they’re also not at all similar in others. Does that make sense? Or have I completely thrown you off?

What I’m trying to say is that at this age, their differences in personalities don’t really present themselves until it comes to a particular situation.

Despite being the eldest (by a whole 2 minutes), Nunu tends to let his brother dominate a conversation.

K-Bear is Mr Chatterbox and when a question is asked to both of them, K-Bear will be the first to jump in with the answer.

It’s not that Nunu’s an introvert or shy. In fact, as Mr Sociable, he loves approaching other kids at the playground to introduce himself then ask them for their name. Sometimes, he’ll do it several times – to the same kid. The poor child being targeted will look at Nunu in bemusement (occasionally in annoyance ) as if to say, “Wait. Didn’t we just go through this???”

Ah, my son. He’s just practicing his social skills.

Problem is, there is a tendency of being overshadowed by his brother. And this has started to be a growing concern for us.

On the rare occasion when time and exceptional organization skills work harmoniously together in our household, we separate the boys for one on one time.

Sometimes we’ll take one to the shopping mall and the other to the airport. One of us might travel in the car while the other takes public transport. Whatever we do, it’s usually impromptu.

On Sunday, we both decided to catch a bus, albeit separate ones. The destinations hadn’t been decided.

We also hadn’t told the twinlets of our plans but minutes before we left the house, Nunu reached over to his brother and gave him a random hug. Kinda like a “Dude, this might be a bit tough for you, but you’ll be fine. Trust me, I’m your older bro” embrace.

I don’t particularly look out for these “twintuition” moments but when they do happen, I sit up to see and soak in how magical it is.

I took K-Bear and wasn’t quite sure where we would go.

Mr Surfer decided that he would just let Nunu lead him.

“I’m just going to let him tell me what he wants to do…”

After boarding the bus and realizing that his mother and brother weren’t coming along, Nunu asked his dad where we were.

“They’re catching a different bus,” was the reply.

“Oh, okay…” and nothing more mentioned.

K-Bear on the other hand, despite usually being the more confident one, held my hand very tightly when our bus arrived. It then occurred to me that maybe, he relies on his brother to be that pillar of confidence for him.

He constantly asked for his brother and his father for the first five minutes then as he kept holding my hand, he slowly slouched into his seat and fell asleep.

Meanwhile, Nunu was having a ball. Time on his own with his dad all to himself and potato chips to boot! For this twin, what wasn’t there to love? More importantly, what or who was there to miss?

As it worked out, we both ended up doing the same thing, catching the bus then the train to Circular Quay. Both had an ice cream and a wander, checking out the ships and ferries.

A quick mobile phone conversation, we decided to meet up but not tell the boys.

The look on the boys’ faces when they first spotted each other could’ve melted my heart like fire to candle wax.

As the twinlets grow into active, independent little boys, I see the need to separate them on a regular basis. It doesn’t need to be for long, massive periods of time.

Just enough to give them the space they need to help discover themselves and become even more confident in who they are.

Because with twins, it’s a given finding strength in numbers. But it takes a conscious effort to build the power of being one.

About Me…

Indonesian-born, Grace spent extensive time living and working overseas, primarily in Japan. She now resides in Sydney where she is mum to identical twin boys and wife to an avid surfer. While she has happily replaced office life with motherhood, Grace has discovered that a 10 year career in corporate sales and being fluent in 3 languages is futile when dealing with toddler tantrums and singing “The Wheels On The Bus”