Ridiculous expenditure of the Year

Shit. This is like a strip-bar buffet. What isn’t up for grabs and what isn’t gross and offensive?

And the envelope is opened and the winner is: A tie. Which is like kissing your sister, but we digress.

This needs an atrium

The Hearnes Hall Atrium and the Cadaver Lab. (Stay tuned, we have runners up!)

The atrium is probably the grandest display of Presidunce Council hubris. We can live with the “one stop shop” bullshit. We might even understand it in its community college kind of way. But to justify this monument to useless spending by claiming Hearnes Hall needs to be the fucking Taj Mahal because it will be prospective students’ first impression is (surprise) insulting our intelligence.

Let’s be honest. Missouri Southern isn’t goddamn Stanford. Most prospective students are here because it is a) inexpensive (We still think a real VALUE with excellent faculty), b) close to home and c) less than highly selective in admissions. Most prospective students would be here anyway. You dickwads want to walk into work through a grand overcompensation for your tiny dicks (and whatever Jo Jo is overcompensating for).

The atrium, in the words of Maxwell Smart, missed this outright by “this much.” (Visualize two fingers only slightly separated by the approximate length of LL Cool J-Regift’s dick) But the goddamn cadaver lab got just enough votes at today’s Watch confab at Casa Montez.

Why the fuck does Missouri Southern need a cadaver lab? OK. We know Pitt State has one and it has an academic purpose and shit, but do we have the money for this NOW? Once again, MSSU isn’t goddamn Stanford. It isn’t like this is a hotbed for pre-med majors (see above reasons prospective students come here). And after the whole KCUMB mess, we don’t see this situation changing anytime soon. Side note: If you want to get into the growth area of health education, build a fucking building that has a roof that FITS.

Also receiving votes:

Architectural plans for the medical school and indoor practice facility (disqualified for not being this year)

Stress Balls

Bruce Speck’s salary (this got some real early juice, but lost momentum as we approached Montez in our AMC Gremlin)

The Staff Senate (These are a collection of ass-kissing fucknuts, sure. But the sick leave pool alone is worth the cost of this group. That was a great move. And Debbie Dutch going along had us shitting our pants in surprise)

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