Read Cat Marnell’s $500k Book Proposal, Which is As Horrible As You’d Expect

“Between you and me,” Cat Marnell confides in the recently leaked book proposal with which she wrangled a $500,000 advance from Simon & Schuster, “half the time I feel very little remorse. AND I have a massive ego, if I really think about it.” Well, yes. The proposal, which you can read from over at Jezebel, is full of stories about drugs and sex and general debauchery, all explained with Marnell’s trademark poor-me-aren’t-I-glamorous style that never fails to make us roll our eyes.

If Marnell’s Twitter feed can be believed, she’s not too happy about the leak. She tweeted a string of all-caps explanations/complaints, beginning with “I HATE MY FUCKING BOOK PROPOSAL TOO. IT’S ME TAPDANCING OUT ALL THE WORST MOMENTS OF MY LIFE TO PUBLISHERS FOR MONEY IN AN OUTLINE. OKAY?” Okay. Another tweet: “AND I HATE MYSELF WAY MORE THAN YOU ALL HATE ME.” We want to say something snide here, but she’s probably right.