It is a time of fear in the face of freedom, a time of an emptying country and swelling cities, a time for the widening of previous roads and the opening of new paths, yet a time when these paths are mined by knowing algorithms of the all-seeing eye. It is the time of the warrior's peace and the miser's charity, when the planting of a seed is an act of conscientious objection. These are the times when maps fade, old landmarks crumble and direction is lost. Forwards is backwards now, so we glance sideways at the strange lands through which we are all passing, knowing for certain only that our destination has disappeared. We are unready to meet these times, but we proceed nonetheless, adapting as we wander, reshaping the Earth with every tread. Behind us we have left the old times, the standard times, the high times. Welcome to the irregular times.

Mike Huckabee Sings Kiss the Devil

Republican candidate for president Mike Huckabee knows the truth is coming out. He’s a Satan-loving Sinner and he’s proud to scream and shout: Kiss the Devil! Oh yes. Smooches for Satan too, you know.

What? Whaaaaat? Is that offensive? Offensive to your religious sensibilities? But, wait, gee… wasn’t Mike Huckabee telling his supporters that electing him is the Lord’s work? Wasn’t Mike Huckabee telling crowds last week that his job as president was to rewrite the Constitution to fit his idea of God’s standards? Hell’s bells, it’s OK for someone to use the office of president to turn narrow Baptist sensibilities into the law of the land, but it’s not OK for an image of Mike Huckabee to propose giving Satan a little smooch? Whose standards are that? Whose rules are that? Whose politics is this? Whose nation is this?

i’m afraid this is the sort of approach that will, if you’ll pardon the ironic metaphor, only ring true with the choir. the people who will be offended by this are the same people who already think it’s OK that Huckster wants to replace the bill of rights with the list of shants, and this won’t persuade them that this is an illogical or irrational or unfair PoV. they really want a christian government, and most of them either don’t care what brand of christian or firmly believe that their brand will end up on top, since it’s obviously the one true way.

Oh, you’re probably right. I’ve done the sincere version too, and I wanted just to have fun with this one. I’ve gotten tired of the whole can’t-disagree-with-someone-who-says-he-communicates-with-the-lord-of-the-universe game, so I’m just blowing out the other side of the whole thing.

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