Three Explorers Choose Their Deaths

A Frenchman, an Englishman and a New Yorker are
exploring the jungle and are captured by a fierce
tribe.

The chief tells them, "The bad news is that we've
caught you, we're going to kill you, and then use
your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that
you get to choose how you die."

The Frenchman says, "I take ze poison." The chief
gives him some poison; the Frenchman says, "Vive
la France!" and drinks it down.

The Englishman says, "A pistol for me, please."
The chief gives him a pistol; the Brit points it
at his head, says, "God save the Queen!" and blows
his brains out.

The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork." The chief is
puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The
New Yorker takes the fork and jabs himself all
over -- the stomach, the sides, the chest,
everywhere. Blood gushes from every hole.

The chief screams, "What are you doing?"

The New Yorker looks at the chief and says, "So
much for your canoe, a**hole!"