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I voted #4. We don't allow running, but noise is OK. We also allow them to wrestle in their bedroom. Sometimes I'll turn on music and let them "dance" (read: shake their bodies all around) around the living room.

Carrie

Only three things are necessary to make life happy: the blessing of God, books, and a friend.

I have been known to turn my boys out in the rain and yuck. That doesn't stop them...they love it. Not in lightening of course...but they can run their willies out in the rain just as well as the sun...and they think it's fun.
Oh and sorry, I didn't vote...can't decide yet.

Our house isn't set up for a lot of running, but I allow a certain amount of wrestling around, and loud/semi-wild play on yucky days.

What I don't allow is hurting one another or being so out of control that they don't hear/listen to me, or that they are oblivious to what's going on around them. But there's room for a certain amount of horseplay on some occasions as long as they are wise about it.

I have a low tolerance for rough housing so when dh and the kids start a bout of karate sparring or some other activity I just get busy in the other room. Sib to sib rough housing is pretty non existant in our house. I have 2 teenage girls and 1 son, 11. I'm sure if I had another boy things would amp up around here, but as it is everyone is pretty self controlled.

The kids practice karate sparring and kata in the livingroom and garage. Dad engages them in sword battles and nerf basketball, but other than that, we don't have much rough housing going on.

Son has neighbor boys who have outside gun battles, fort building and sledding on a regular basis so I think his rough housing need is met through other physical outlets.

I voted #4. Pretty much what Lisa R. said. We don't allow screaming, punching, or throwing anything but a certain amount of rough-housing is fine as long as they don't get out of control. They do most of their rough-housing downstairs away from the main living areas. When they get on a roll, I keep an eye on them to make sure they don't get out of control. My kids are still quite young so I feel that they should have some flexibility in this area. As they get older, I will allow less and less because there will be more chances for someone getting overly zealous.

EDITED TO ADD ONE MORE THING: Furniture of any kind is off limits. No jumping on or getting anywhere near the furniture. That is why we encourage them to play downstairs because it is far away from the main living areas and nice furniture.

3) I didn't buy into the "boys will be boys" school of parenting. I didn't believe that part of being male was being out of control, obnoxious, loud, disorderly, wild, destructive, and irritating. Jumping on the furniture and running through the house overturning chairs and tables is not good stewardship of what DH has provided for us.

4) I believed that certain behaviors have certain arenas. Loud and physical play is for outdoors. I think home should be serene, peaceful and restorative.

That said...we did allow our kids to have fun. They played imaginatively. Sometimes that got "exuberant" but I didn't let it slide over into wild.

Now our family can get loud at times. We were playing Taboo the other evening and it got VERY loud. But we were all having fun together and laughing so hard we were falling out of our chairs. That is different from one person trying to read while someone else is screaming nearby and jumping up and down on the couch.

I voted #4. When the kids were small, much of the rough, noisy play was with my husband. It sounded like someone was getting killed. The kids would shriek bloody murder and I would step to intervene -- that is until I saw the kids run right back to Daddy, leap on him and say, "Do it again!" After a few episodes like that, I just ignored their pleas for help.

It does get pretty crazy around here with prankish behavior. I have mixed feelings about it.
Lynda

Well, since my kids are teens, it is kind of hard to answer that one! There isn't an option for: no, you can't kill you sister; no you can't smash your brother over the head with his guitar; no, no airsoft guns in the house!

So, I guess if I were to answer the poll, it would be no roughousing in the house at all, they are just TOO BIG!

Edited to say: I agree with 100% of what Charity said! I probably should have read first, posted second, but didn't. She really states my thoughts in her so very eloquent way! And yes, we've traded one type of noise (play) for another type (electric guitar, acoustic guitar, electric bass, piano)! Sometimes, I do have to ask one or both of them to stop the practicing until the other is done with school, or at least put headphones on so no one else can hear them!

I agree with Charity, however, we have an only girl, and she did not have a tendency to be rough. Still, we like our fun, so while we weren't really rough, there was a certain amount silliness but it never got out of hand.

If we had more than one child, I think I would have sent them outside for certain levels of play. The fruit of the Spirit is self control, and we are to be good stewards of what we have. Really wild, rough play can wait until the children are outdoors.

I voted #4. But, I was wondering, is it really possible to roughhouse quietly?

Usually, it's quite sane around here. We don't allow running and screaming, for the most part anyway.

But, I have to share a secret with you. The worst when it comes to horseplay are my dh and our 21 yo ds! Oh, my goodness, I'm afraid that I'll have no house left one day. (Keep in mind that we have a small house!) Then if our 20 yo ds gets in on it, too, it's even worse! Of course, the four youngest ones are all yelling and screaming at this point. (You see, it's dh that instigates all this! )

I voted for #4...no rough play but noise. After DS got rowdy and was jumping around in his 2nd floor bedroom and the china in the 1st floor china cabinet began to rattle and topple over breaking 3 or 4 pieces of my 100 year old antique china we ended rough play in the house. DH's office is part of the family room in the basement. He says that the computer equipment and electronics are too expensive to replace if DS is jumping around and accidently breaks something there. Noise is another issue as DH and DS have hearing issues and need to play music, tv, etc. loud in order to hear it.

Mairi
Soli Deo Gloria

"We are saved by faith alone, but the faith that saves us is never alone." Martin Luther

exuberant play can get noisy fast, especially with airplaines, sirens, construction noises, cowboys, Indians, battleships, etc, etc. that goes with the imaginations of four boys from 7 to 2.

We try and keep in under control, or we go insane. Good, imaginative play is fine, football is done outside, no screaming just to scream. Usually it is fine and getting to *wild* is like the warning that an injury is coming. Somedays though, just the normal dull roar drives me bonkers, and they are sent outside.

I've found the answer to this! You get a trampoline with a fence, but it's not for jumping. Think of it as a giant playpen for overgrown boys. LOL! Dh and the two boys would go out there and thrash around. It was perfect. There's no china cupboards. No lamps. No coffee table corners on which to slice skulls. They can body slam each other and the tramp gives more than a floor does. And if they do a throw, there's a netting to fly into instead of sheetrock thru which to put an elbow.

The day the tramp was gifted to the neighbors was a very sad one for me....

I've found the answer to this! You get a trampoline with a fence, but it's not for jumping. Think of it as a giant playpen for overgrown boys. LOL! Dh and the two boys would go out there and thrash around. It was perfect. There's no china cupboards. No lamps. No coffee table corners on which to slice skulls. They can body slam each other and the tramp gives more than a floor does. And if they do a throw, there's a netting to fly into instead of sheetrock thru which to put an elbow.

The day the tramp was gifted to the neighbors was a very sad one for me....

Charity

You mean you got rid of it? Are your dh and boys through "playing" around with each other already? Goodness, I just figured they'd still have a lot of good years left!

But, I think the Lord blessed me with these youngest four kids. There's only one boy among them!

We have wrestling matches, AKA "War", Tickle Time, and sometimes some loud fun, but the majority of noise is only allowed upstairs in the playroom or outdoors. I'm trying very hard to stifle the "running gene" my husband has cursed upon our children(he's a distance runner), the only way my kids know how to get from point A to point B is to run !

...but they can run their willies out in the rain just as well as the sun...and they think it's fun.

Umm - are "willies" what I think they are? "Willies" in Australia refers to boy bits, but I can't imagine "running them out" in the rain - wouldn't they get cold? Sounds like a Hornblower naval book - "run out the guns"! But "run out the willies" doesn't sound the same...

Your sister in Christ,

Elizabby

Evie is six, Zoe is four, and Benji is two!

Not online as much these days, contact me through email or my blog if you want to talk to me!

My goodness...my husband is usually the instigator and it ususally begins when he teases somebody then waits till they notice-then it is a free for all. We like to have spontenaity (sp?) and laughter in our home and want our kids to remember that. But we aren't always loud and obnoxious either, just some of both.

If you are the mood for a funny story read on.
My husband left one afternoon and my son (about 6 at the time) and I were in the front yard. I screamed at him now you're mine and started chasing him wildly around the yard. Well, we live out in the country so this okay but at the time a very handsome man about five years older then went jogging by, heard me, saw us and watched while I tackled my son and tickled him, let him excape and captured him again. Okay, it was a little boy thing, not really a mom thing and not something I usually do. He kept jogging by, laughing now and I was really embarassed but proceeded of course because I had already lost an decourum I ever had.

I forgot to mention when my kids were too loud and wouldn't stop running or rough housing when I needed them too I made them run on their knees. A couple times through the hard wood floors calmed them right down!

[Updated on: Tue, 14 November 2006 21:04]

I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
~from Ecclesiastes 3:14~

...but they can run their willies out in the rain just as well as the sun...and they think it's fun.

Umm - are "willies" what I think they are? "Willies" in Australia refers to boy bits, but I can't imagine "running them out" in the rain - wouldn't they get cold? Sounds like a Hornblower naval book - "run out the guns"! But "run out the willies" doesn't sound the same...

Um, no, it's not the same here. Actually, I wouldn't use "willies" in that sentence, but basically she means "excess energy," I believe!

Those cultural things between various English-speaking countries can be quite funny--like the time our Australian friend came to visit and my dd took her to Walmart. The friend asked where the "thongs" were and couldn't understand my dd's surprised look until they figured out that in Australia thongs are sandals with no back and a thing between your first two toes--our flip flops. And in America when one refers to, um, s*xy underwear.

My dh usually instigates the rough housing in our home. I voted number 4. It usually starts with dh and ends up with the dog chasing everyone (especially ds) around the house while the cats and I try to stay out of the way. Marshmallows are ammunition around here and NOT a tasty treat (at least not all the time). According to dh, the big ones are regular bullets and a handful of the smaller ones is the equivalent of shotgun pellets. Nerf guns do end up in the house, also instigated by dh. The occasional water fight will also start, but it quickly gets moved outside.

...but they can run their willies out in the rain just as well as the sun...and they think it's fun.

Umm - are "willies" what I think they are? "Willies" in Australia refers to boy bits, but I can't imagine "running them out" in the rain - wouldn't they get cold? Sounds like a Hornblower naval book - "run out the guns"! But "run out the willies" doesn't sound the same...

Um, no, it's not the same here. Actually, I wouldn't use "willies" in that sentence, but basically she means "excess energy," I believe!

Those cultural things between various English-speaking countries can be quite funny--like the time our Australian friend came to visit and my dd took her to Walmart. The friend asked where the "thongs" were and couldn't understand my dd's surprised look until they figured out that in Australia thongs are sandals with no back and a thing between your first two toes--our flip flops. And in America when one refers to, um, s*xy underwear.

Well, that's what we called them when I was a kid, so it's not just Australia, Lisa! (The "thongs" I meant!!!) Does flip-flops still work?

Yeppers, Diane! We needed to clear out the space to build a garage and it really was getting unsafe for them all to be thrashing on it at their sizes. The three of them together is well in excess of 500 pounds. LOL! The neighbor is a single Mom with 3 small kids. They were ecstatic.

And no, they're not done thrashing yet and my china is once again endangered...

We have wrestling matches, AKA "War", Tickle Time, and sometimes some loud fun, but the majority of noise is only allowed upstairs in the playroom or outdoors. I'm trying very hard to stifle the "running gene" my husband has cursed upon our children(he's a distance runner), the only way my kids know how to get from point A to point B is to run !

Jules - off-topic, but I just noticed that you're from Eugene, Oregon. That is where I grew up! I graduated from Churchill High School - too many years ago to mention. LOL!

"a certain amount..." And here's why. I grew up with only sisters and was not used to boy's rough housing. I have two sons - 13yo and 20yo. They like to wrestle and run around. It was really hard when my now 20yos was a toddler to allow him to run and jump in the house. I have wayyyyy!! relaxed over the years.

However, I don't make the rest of us miserable and they have limits, lots!! They are not to throw things in a room where something could break. They are to be reasonable with what they toss about (not rocks or knives!!) but small, lighter weight balls or other objects. They can run but not knock anyone down. They can be loud but not if someone else objects.

They do handstands, hand walking, arm wrestling but not full body wrestling because they are too big for our living space.

Any of this abruptly stops if dh or I say! And, though it's not constant, I do believe I see (or hear) a little bit everyday.

I would let them play hard, only reigning them in if it looks like property damage might be imminent. Boys especially need to get the energy out. Our basement futons often got flipped into the floor to make wrestling mats, etc. when we lived in places where the weather was too harsh most of the year to get outside and they were too old for indoor playspots.

kinda like Janice.

Another thing I would do, if this was available and when they are little guys, would be to take them to an indoor play place, even a fast food one, and let them run themselves ragged.

We have wrestling matches, AKA "War", Tickle Time, and sometimes some loud fun, but the majority of noise is only allowed upstairs in the playroom or outdoors. I'm trying very hard to stifle the "running gene" my husband has cursed upon our children(he's a distance runner), the only way my kids know how to get from point A to point B is to run !

Jules - off-topic, but I just noticed that you're from Eugene, Oregon. That is where I grew up! I graduated from Churchill High School - too many years ago to mention. LOL!

Charity

It can't be that long ago, what are you, 28-29 years old?

We've only lived here 3 years, but we're not going anywhere anytime soon, we really like it.

What a coincidence,my sister lives in Alaska! Big Lake, I think it's called. Maybe you can "accidentally" run into her and possibly "just happen to" witness to her...

We have 2 boys, 5 and 6, and most of the time the roughousing a noise is them, but sometimes our 9yo daughter joins in. The LOVE when daddy gets down on the floor and flips them around and tickles them and chases them. No matter how many times he gets the best of them, they still come running back for more. My 6yo tends to get hurt a bit easier then the 5yo, so usually he's the first one to quit. Our 5yo knows no fear is is VERY rough and tumble. He was raised by hubby alone for first 2 years of his life so that accounts for most of it.

I don't mind if my boys wrestle around as long as an adult is there to referee, they very easily get out of hand. A lot of times, one will inadvertently hurt the other and the other will retaliate and then it's time out cause it will escalate into a fight. They are not allowed to run in the house, or screech and scream very loudly unless we are having family playtime and there is no one who might be disturbed by the chaos.

Hub likes to let the kids play in rain when it's warm out, but I'm always worried they'll get sick or overly muddy! So I usually am the one who says ok, enough, time to come in!

I prefer some quiet moments in my home, but I rarely get them. With 3 kids in a 1200 sq ft house, noise is enevitable!

Cassie - Helpmeet to Bobby, Mother of Jasmine-13, Drew-10, Isaiah-8, Joseph-2, and one on the way in Feb 2011.

I voted #4 also. We don't like running in the house (house is to small anyways) We let the boys rough house a bit, they really don't have the space in their bedroom. They can have music on, sing dance and be silly. My husbands big thing is not pushing into walls doors etc..

I voted #4. I'm not fond of noise and rough-housing, but I'll allow a certain amount. The wildest times at our house happen when our friends' two boys come over (age 6 & 9). They'll be coming over for a couple hours next Tuesday, and tonight the six of them were excitedly planning their activities. Their game of choice is "cops." It involves at least one of them being the "bad guy," with the "good guys" chasing them through the house, hollering for them to stop. My favorite part is when our friends' 9 yo is reading them their rights (his grandpa is a police officer), and he says, "You have the right to a main silence."

After a certain amount of this game though, I can't take the noise any more, and I'll tell them to find something else to play for a while. Now if dh is home, he'll stop them right away and tell them to play quietly and stop running through the house! The last thing he wants when he comes home from work is to have the kids running around shrieking like wild things.

I don't allow hitting, punching, kicking, etc., they aren't allowed to slam doors, and they definitely aren't allowed to jump on, over, or off of the furniture.

Well, I can say, I live in a house with dh and 2 boys. I NEED SOME ESTROGEN IN THIS HOUSE! Boys are sooooooo..... not girls. Give me some nail polish and tea parties anyday. I've had a lot to get used to, with all the sound effects, wrestling, crashes, and just noise. It does tend to drive me bonkers.

What I usually allow is for them to play "rough" without anyone or anything getting broken/hurt/mad. If it's nice outside, I'll send them out to get their energy out.

One of my favorite memories, though, is when dss were 4 and 2, I woke up one morning to the sounds of "Hee-yaaaaa!" in the living room. Dh was wrestling with both boys in the living room and they were having the time of their lives.

Blessings,
Sparrow's Song

Love divine has seen and counted
Every tear it caused to fall;
And the storm which Love appointed
Was its choicest gift of all...

I have 4 sons within 4 years, the oldest is only 12. I am just the kind of person who cannot deal with noise. If they want to be loud and run around it's ONLY done OUTSIDE...rain, snow, cold, no matter. The inside of our home is not a jungle gym.
For some weird reason, I noticed that my boys got hurt more often while rough housing inside the house than when going outside.

Multilevel Homeschooling ... Most moms of several children become experts at multitasking with experience--although don't let anyone convince you that it's as simple to homeschool a bunch as it is one or two.