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8.14.2009

Crybaby

I'm still super busy at work, but it's slowed enough that I have a few minutes to come post this. Hopefully things will settle back down to a more manageable flow soon. If I had to guess, it won't be until I go on vacation in October.

I had a rough day yesterday, and I really don't have time to go into it, nor do I think I should anymore. I've taken a step and shown my blog to a few coworkers and, while I look forward to their thoughts, I find that I might need to filter my thoughts on my posts and I don't really have that kind of time right now.

I will say this I had an incident where I ended up in tears in front of my boss. Again. Like for the fourth time since I've worked here in under two years.

Mostly, it pisses me off. I wear my heart on my sleeve and my emotions on my face. And the minute someone addresses that, the waterworks come on. It's not sobbing or anything. Just tears. Spilling down my face. Ruining what little make up I wear. No wonder he thinks I'm not even 24 (when I just turned 29!).

So, my quick question is, what do I do? Do you cry at the drop of a hat? Did you? How do I stop from welling up the moment someone says, 'Are you OK?'

I'm not a crier...but I get pissed. So instead of tears running down my face, I'd have steam coming out of my ears. ha! Actually, one time *I* made a girl at work cry. Eeek! But she was a crazy biotch, seriously, and to make a long story short...she started it, I ended it, and everyone came up to me later telling me I was their hero because everyone was afraid to stand up to her. (seriously, I'm the nicest person around, but this one girl brought out the worst in EVERYBODY. She was the hot potato that was passed around from dept to dept because nobody could work with her)

Sheesh, I hope you don't think I'm a biotch now! I swear I'm not! ;)

I hope this week is better for you. Don't worry about your emotions...you are who you are, and everyone deals differently. :)

Well I know how you feel! And I am sorry things are so busy and stressful for you. I cried at work several times at my previous job. One time in front of my immediate boss and several other times I simply left the room and called a co-worker, who would completely understand, yet she was also (and still to this day is) a very good friend. It's tough and I found the only time I really lose it is when I am under SEVERE pressure, which is sounds like that is what is happening with you.

When this happened to me, I was working 60+ hour weeks and had been for almost a year and I just couldn't take it anymore. I ended up going to see a therapist.

I don't know what it is about an independent third party point of view but she really helped me realize how the demands being placed on me from my work were very unreasonable but that it was within my power to change the situation. Not saying you need therapy, by any means, but just that I completely understand how you feel and I'm sorry you are going through this. It sucks.

I'm not usually much of a crier but, of course, one of my only work-related crying sessions was in the CEO's office. It was about 2 years ago - I was 28 - and he was talking to me like he thought I was about 20 or 21. He seemed surprised when I told him I was older than his son. Nevertheless, I still broke down in tears and don't think I did much to prove my point. :-) The stress just gets to you sometimes and the options that come to mind are scream cuss words, throw things or cry. At least crying doesn't get you fired. So, in lieu of any real advice, I think I'll just concur with peewee that Nutella is the way to go. I'm coming up on an incredibly stressful time at work also, so I fully expect I'll have a crying blog before the end of the year!