10:32 AM – picture frame mysteriously falls from wall, throwing Mommy’s prized Gallery Wall off balance. I become aware of this when Medium sheepishly announces, “Um, I have something to tell you, and I’m gonna be in BIG trouble.” This never ends well.

10:58 AM – restart WipeOut, so we can watch it AGAIN.

11:14 AM – Medium: “Did you know that Justin Beiber sings 'Eenie Meenie Miney Moe'? And so does his best friend Utcher.”

1:07 PM – see neighbor boys outside with their mom, who is taking them to the tennis courts, and they want to know, can Large and Medium come? Gee, I just put Small down for a nap . . . “I can take them,” says neighbor mom. Well-played, Boy Mommy. Well-played.

1:08 PM – After admonitions to use their best manners, be good listeners, etc., Mommy sits on couch to catch up on the world news. (Afghanistan? Midwest Flooding? The upcoming Presidential Race?) And also, Real Housewives of New Jersey.

2:00 PM – they’re back.

2:14 PM - Overheard from basement: “Whoa. It’s a good thing you were wearing a helmet.”

2:36 PM - Medium: “Is Pluto just a really small planet, or is it big but just really far away?” F*ck if I know, kid.

3:07 PM – Medium begins doing laps around the kitchen and living room on the Ride-On vehicle intended for the baby and complete with a set of headphones. At last count, he was on lap 75. He’s perfectly content.

4:00 PM – Know what time it is? It’s Happy Hour! We’re just gonna have one glass.

About Me

I am a Stay-at-Home Mommy to three boys. My daily goal is to keep my head out of the oven. Ask any one of my children what lesson Mommy has taught them, and they'll tell you "to never ride in the back of a police car." Because they can sit in the front, but if they're ridin' in the back, they're in BIG trouble. Like time-out trouble.