Saturday, December 29, 2018

The Body Electric: Pulse

A visit with my long time friend and her fam at the Hirshhorn for Lozano-Hemmer’s Pulse and Kruger’s belief & doubt. Lunch at Museum of Native American. Afternoon at Air & Space and awe for the brave insanity of the space program. Dinner at Sandovan. Laughter. Memories. Conversations about Oumuamua, Fibonacci and the mysterious order of things, coincidence and congruence, and Jung’s Red Book as a devotional, and tsutsugamushi and the importance of human intuition in medicine. And missing her. And gratitude for the way our friendship spans time.

Tuesday, December 25, 2018

The Sleigh Has Landed

"It is in the imagination with which you perceive this world, and the gestures with which you honor it." - Mary Oliver.

Our annual Solstice party was delightful and in a blink it was Xmas. I made all mater of tasty eats during our winter break. We had Marcella Hazan's cabbage soup on xmas eve, Chocolate bread, hot out of the oven Xmas morn and our usual Tomato Risotto for xmas Eve. The jolly ole elf waited til near midnight to be sure the mancub was asleep before placing gifts beneath the tree. My son bounded into my room at 3:23 am squealing, “MOM wait til you see what Santa left in my stocking!” I mumbled that I was happy but go back to bed until daylight. He went back to bed then was up at 5 am. I finally crawled out of bed near 7, made myself a giant latte sprinkled with juniper sugar and watched him merrily unwrap his gifts.

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

This month is National Domestic Violence Awareness month. Most people think of domestic violence as physical abuse. But there is another form of violence against women that is equally harmful, yet invisible. Financial abuse is a form of domestic violence. Financial abuse is controlling, demoralizing and chips away at a woman's self esteem. Financial abuse causes fear, and anxiety, depression, and emotional trauma.

A few examples of financial abuse are:

Not including you in financial decisions.

Not telling you about bonuses or financial gain.

Not providing a joint bank account.

Not giving you access to finances, ie. not putting you on his bank account, making you have to ask for money.

Taking money that belongs to you without your permission.

Most victims of financial abuse suffer in silence, learn the warning signs and offer support. If she reaches out to you, here's how to talk to someone who is being financially abused:

Let her know this is a judgment-free conversation and she is not alone.

Offer your support.

Listen

"I know this is difficult to discuss, but please know you can talk to me about anything."

"You are not alone. I care about you, and I'm here for you, no matter what."

"You are not responsible for what's going on."

"No matter what you did, you do not deserve this."

Do not hijack the conversation to talk yourself.

If you've experienced abuse in a past relationship now is not the time to compare and contrast your experience with hers, ie. "my ex took my entire savings" or "my pushed me off the steps". This isn't about who had it worse, it's about supporting a victim who reached out to you.

For more information about Financial Abuse, where to seek help or to help some one you know, click on the photo above. You are not alone

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

55

Dear 55 year old me,

Happy re-birthday. You've been through a lot of crap in your lifetime, but you have always made it to the other side intact, and stronger for it. Not to bypass the suffering in any way, you didn't deserve any of that. You won't hear me say "there's a reason for everything" or it's part of God's plan". I know that you won't bow to any God who harms. Maybe we should rethink the adage "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger" because scar tissue is dead tissue and that's the reality even though the divine body has ways of compensating for injury. Bless the scars! Bless not the scar-makers, for they can go suck it!

I admire your way of looking at the big picture and trying to find the right path forward, without insulting your soul in the process. I admire your humanness, your raw honesty, and your strong boundaries, your creativity, your determination and your kindness. You navigate challenges by feeling all the feels in that moment so you can step over them and keep moving, rather than swallowing and silencing and carrying their weight. You have keen intuition, because you have learned the language of your body, the voice without words and you allow this to guide you.

You have learned that there are tricksters, some quite obvious, and others who somehow evade your radar. It's not because you invite them - no - or because you are naive - no - it's because masks make it difficult to read faces. But masks do slip eventually, and then you see clearly the shadow behind it. Remember this, in those rare and shocking encounters, these shadow beings have never been able to steal your muchness, your passion, your creativity, your sense of wonder, your truth, your love of nature, and your pursuit of beauty. At most, these shadow beings have left behind a wall of scar tissue on the area of trust. But don't forget there are nanotubes, between scar tissue and healthy heart cells, which electrically unite. The scar wall will protect you, and the nanotubes will connect you to truth.

Use your tools skillfully, calling into circle the trustworthy souls that care about you and the safety and the truth telling and the insight. When in doubt consult. You are wiser than you know, it's just that you are unable to see where this odd, unfamiliar and unconventional path is taking you. It's not a clear or easy path. There has been, there is, and there will still be obstacles. You will navigate them, as you have always done. Assess the terrain. Look for the markers. Trust the knowing.

Don't lose yourself on this journey...you, the maker of all manner of things, you are the mama bear that gathers and shares, you of the mountains and the Manahatta, you healer of foxes and sniffer of flowers, you holder of stunned birds, you advocate of spiders and speaker for trees.

Go ahead - Open your mouth and let the bees fly out, most bees are female, they only sting when threatened. Remember to eat the cake and howl at the moon with your pack who loves you. On this, your 55th ride around the sun, may you hug all the years you've lived and love all the hers who've come before and especially the her riding this twirling chunk of space rock right now. She deserves it.

Friday, July 06, 2018

Kingdom of Swoon

Friday, June 15, 2018

Thirteen: Sleeping with Wolves & Other Birthday Adventures

As part of our son's 13th birthday rites of passage, we took him to NY for a sleepover with wolves. It was unforgettable!

The wolf conservation center’s mission is to save wolves from extinction while educating humans about their essential purpose and debunk the myths you may have heard about them. This is not a place to get your photo taken with a drugged wild animal. We don’t support those immoral roadside attractions. At the WCC the only thing between 30 acres of wolf territory and you is a chain link fence. What that means is, while you will likely not see all 51 wolves, you WILL hear them loud and clear as they are often nearby in the brush. Wolves are wild animals and naturally afraid of humans. However, there are 4 teacher wolves who have been conditioned to humans so they will visit you near the fence, close enough to smell their wild breath. They will nap near you, and sing near you for their medicine is to teach you. They are free to roam so when they wish to leave you, they will do so at will. Because the 4 teacher wolves have been conditioned to accept humans, it also makes them the most dangerous because they are unafraid. Therefore no hands on the fence EVER. If a teacher wolf were to bite a human, it would have to be killed. The WCC is trying to protect wolves because they are endangered, it would be devastating to lose a teacher wolf due to human carelessness. The last wild wolf in NY state was killed in 1890. That should give you a clear picture of our inhumanity. For more information about WCC and all their hard work to save these soulful creatures, please visit their website. If you are able, book a sleepover there. You won’t be disappointed. The guides are friendly animal scientists and conservationists. They are a wealth of information and empathy. And the howling will touch something deep inside you, and you will leave changed, and awestruck.

The next day we drove out Long Island to visit Elizabeth Morton Wildlife Refuge where birds fly out of the trees to eat out of your hands, and chipmunks crawl into you palm. We went for a dip at Wildwood State Park, a beach I went to with my late father. We would gather all sorts of cool stones to take home and polish. It’s a rocky beach with gorgeous bluffs. I wanted to bring my son there on father’s day in memory of my dad. On the way back we stopped by Wardenclyffe the lab of Nikoli Tesla. We stopped to visit with friends and family in between adventures.

About Me

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Mother, Artist, Vegetarian, Chocoholic, Joyologist
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CONTACT: wendy(at)wendycook(dotcom)
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This is the journal of Wendy Cook. I come to this page to write about our days so that my son will have a diary of our life together. Perhaps you will find something useful here as you navigate the terrain of your own path. ...........................................
Topics are categorized by subject in the chapters section on my sidebar. Useful links are located in my sidebar also.
For information regarding product reviews, please refer to the footer. ...........................................

Words to live by...

"To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty...
To leave the world a bit better,
whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition."

Mother Rising Featured In

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"Imagine a mother who believes she belongs in the world.
A mother who celebrates her own life. Who is glad to be alive." - Patricia Lynn Reilly