Top Ten Fees You Can Only Wish You Could Charge Your Landlords and Tenants!

We asked our Facebook audience what fees they would charge Landlords or Tenants if there were no restrictions or legislation to hinder them.

So here is the wish-list of fees that our audience was able to come up with: (I have added some artistic license in naming these fees)

Firstly and importantly – Are these fees legitimate?

No! They are here for your amusement only. Remember, we can not charge tenants any fees in Australia. It’s always good to have a laugh though!

· $150 Tenant Vacate Annoying Comment Fee – charged when a tenant states ‘it’s in better condition now than when I moved in’!

· $50 Landlord Statement Dumb Question/Query Fee – charged when an owner calls to query their statement without reading the whole statement first! Double the fee if they asked the same question last month as well!

· $75 Tenant Non-original Late Rent Payment Excuse Fee – Charged when a tenant uses the same excuse again when they pay their rent late (because we want them to keep on coming up with new excuses to keep our day interesting!).

· $100 Landlord Stalking Fee – Charged to an owner when they call your landline, then your mobile, then your landline again, then your mobile again, all in a space of 2 minutes!

· $100 Tenant – No Advance Warning fee- A fee to show people through a property when they show up at reception, is only in town for a day and want to see a property then and there but didn’t take the time to set up viewing appointments before their visit to town!

· $300 Tenant ‘but the pet is just visiting’ fee – charged every time you do an inspection and see pet toys, food, blankets and pet beds and the tenant insists the pet is just visiting for a couple days!

· $200 Landlord Ancient Appliance fee – charged to owners when they say the 30-year-old heater/air conditioner “was working when I lived there ” and “the tenant must have broken it”

· $400 Tenant Gardening Boast Fee – charged upfront when a prospective tenant states ‘but I am a great gardener!’ The fee is to clean up the messy garden after the tenant then proceeds to let it become all overgrown and weedy.

· $200 Tenant Keys Early Request fee- A full weeks rent every time a tenant requests to pick up the keys the day before their lease starts (and promises they won’t move anything in)