breast cancer question

my mom has had swelling around her elbow for like a month or two now. she told us recently that they had found something in her breast - i didn't think much of it because for years she has had cysts in her breasts and fatty tissue . however , she now told us that it may be cancer but that they had to do a biopsy first . then a couple hours later told us that they didn't need to do a biopsy that it was cancer . i saw a letter she got a couple weeks ago from a radiology clinic saying she may have a "potential breast issue". i don't want to accuse her of lying but something doesn't feel right . i don't know if i'm just in denial or if she is jist exaggerating an illness - as she has done before . any insight ? on anyone who knows about anything about breast cancer ?

Comments (7)

No direct experience with breast cancer, but I'm familiar with radiology clinics. It's normal for the clinic to not state a diagnosis or suspected diagnosis. Only doctors interpret the scans. So if they sent paperwork to the house, it's not unusual for it to be vague. I'm frankly surprised it specifies the body part.

It's also pretty normal for a doctor to have a hunch, but to withhold formal diagnosis until pathology and radiology get a look.

Her changing her story is on the odd side, but she might be explaining it badly. Or not handling the (potential) diagnosis well.

It's pretty feasible for someone with a history of her breast issues to develop breast cancer. It could also be pre-cancerous.

So I'd lean towards a legit diagnosis until presented with more evidence to the contrary.

No direct experience with breast cancer, but I'm familiar with radiology ...

Posted
02/13/2018

No direct experience with breast cancer, but I'm familiar with radiology clinics. It's normal for the clinic to not state a diagnosis or suspected diagnosis. Only doctors interpret the scans. So if they sent paperwork to the house, it's not unusual for it to be vague. I'm frankly surprised it specifies the body part.

It's also pretty normal for a doctor to have a hunch, but to withhold formal diagnosis until pathology and radiology get a look.

Her changing her story is on the odd side, but she might be explaining it badly. Or not handling the (potential) diagnosis well.

It's pretty feasible for someone with a history of her breast issues to develop breast cancer. It could also be pre-cancerous.

So I'd lean towards a legit diagnosis until presented with more evidence to the contrary.

thanks i think i'm just in denial . i associate cancer with death so i'm just so scared about losing her . she also said that they found where the cancer is and have to see to where else it has progressed . i feel so scared . on top of that she also had to apply for a special insurance to help cover the costs and told us that if she is not approved that she won't be doing treatments as the cost would be way too much . i'm just so scared

thanks i think i'm just in denial . i associate cancer with death so i...

Posted
02/13/2018

thanks i think i'm just in denial . i associate cancer with death so i'm just so scared about losing her . she also said that they found where the cancer is and have to see to where else it has progressed . i feel so scared . on top of that she also had to apply for a special insurance to help cover the costs and told us that if she is not approved that she won't be doing treatments as the cost would be way too much . i'm just so scared

Hugs. I know it's scary. DH (dear husband) lives with a chronic cancer, but it's way less aggressive than breast cancer can be. Not really the same.

There's a very good chance she'll get the cancer insurance. A lot of states have programs that will help with payments for treatment.

If she doesn't get it, or if treatment goes poorly and she still has energy to fight, be sure you look into clinical trials. Especially if it's a phase 2 or 3 or higher. (Or if it's a highly anticipated phase 1 trial.) Basically, a phase one trial is new for humans. Higher phases test drugs with some evidence of working to help further tune or understand the effects and risks.

The vast majority of the time, participation and treatment in a clinical trial comes at zero cost to the patient except time and travel (if needed). She will need to find a doctor who is willing to help get her into one, but once you're in.... they can be anywhere from 0 to 100% effective.

Hang in there, mama. It's going to be a long, hard ride. Make sure you get a support group for yourself. And getting one for her can help too.

Hugs. I know it's scary. DH lives with a chronic cancer, but it's way less aggressive than breast cancer can be. Not really the same.

There's a very good chance she'll get the cancer insurance. A lot of states have programs that will help with payments for treatment.

If she doesn't get it, or if treatment goes poorly and she still has energy to fight, be sure you look into clinical trials. Especially if it's a phase 2 or 3 or higher. (Or if it's a highly anticipated phase 1 trial.) Basically, a phase one trial is new for humans. Higher phases test drugs with some evidence of working to help further tune or understand the effects and risks.

The vast majority of the time, participation and treatment in a clinical trial comes at zero cost to the patient except time and travel (if needed). She will need to find a doctor who is willing to help get her into one, but once you're in.... they can be anywhere from 0 to 100% effective.

Hang in there, mama. It's going to be a long, hard ride. Make sure you get a support group for yourself. And getting one for her can help too.

thank you ): it's just hard - i'm pretty young only 23 and still live with my parents and it's so scary to think about something ever happening to them . she's only 50

thank you ): it's just hard - i'm pretty young only 23 and still live...

Posted
02/13/2018

thank you ): it's just hard - i'm pretty young only 23 and still live with my parents and it's so scary to think about something ever happening to them . she's only 50

Oh, that's rough. Your world is going to change on a daily basis. So, support groups are going to be super helpful for you. There should be a cancer caregiver group in your area. Meeting someone face to face for a hug, or to scream and yell, or to cry is really helpful.

Oh, that's rough. Your world is going to change on a daily basis. So, sup...

Posted
02/13/2018

Oh, that's rough. Your world is going to change on a daily basis. So, support groups are going to be super helpful for you. There should be a cancer caregiver group in your area. Meeting someone face to face for a hug, or to scream and yell, or to cry is really helpful.

Do videos of her. As much as she'll let you.

i just don't want to accept that she may not be around for long . i find myself pushing it to the back of my mind and trying not to deal with it even though i know it's reality . she does get mammograms often so i am hoping it is not too advanced . i asked her if she had any symptoms she just said swelling of her arm/elbow and her breast had some dimpling . for the past few months she was in so much pain to the point she couldn't get out of bed - and she was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. they gave her some medicine and she seemed to be a lot better . it's just all so confusing

Keep in mind that breast cancer is not a death sentence. Both my step-mum and mother-in-law have been diagnosed with it.

My step-mum was diagnosed when I was maybe 15, went through the mastectomy, treatment, reconstructive surgery then a decade of medication afterwards with periodic checks to make sure it hadn't come back. It was definitely rough during treatment, she spent a lot of time cuddled up in a blanket feeling like cr*p, and it took time for her to feel like herself again once it was done, but the past decade she has been living her life, she is officially done the medication for more than a year now, and just as full of life and love as she has ever been.

My mother-in-law was diagnosed this past year and has gone through the mastectomy and treatment and is doing well, still independent and going about life as she always has (she's 76 years old).

I can't say anything in regards to how treatment is paid for/how the medical system works in the States as I'm in Ontario.

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