As seen in the Red Light District of the Summer 2013 issue

4 People to Avoid Watching the NHL Playoffs with:By Michael Grossi, Features EditorTheFourthPeriod.com

1. The Devil's AdvocateHis favourite team is long out of
the playoffs. As a result, he will now root for whoever is playing against your
favourite team.

2. Band-WagonerWatched five games all
season, but shows up decked out in team gear and knows every stat the local
media has spewed out on game day. You'll feel like you're watching the game with
Pierre Maguire as they point out the junior teams of half of your roster's
players.

3. The GamblerSeen on his laptop
during television timeouts trying to 'live bet' during the game. Often heard
saying, "I don't have a gambling problem, I only bet during the playoffs." Avoid
him by calling him on game day and mentioning your Wi-Fi connection is down. He
will find a more suitable place to watch the game.

4. King of BeersThere is a game on and cold beers in
the fridge. That's enough for this guy, he's coming over. You're not sure who
invited him and he doesn't care. When the beer runs out, so will he. Favourite
accessories include beer helmet and spare tire.