Outrage as Johnny Foreigner fails to let Brits win

Britain’s bicyclists were today crying foul after the beastly foreigners did not let Mark Cavendish win the bicycle race. A spokesman said “Our lads were doing really well till some foreigners started peddling faster than us”.
Cavendish’s team mates were heard to shout “come back” and “wait for us” but it is thought the other bicyclists did not understand English.
The Home Secretary has promised to launch a full Judicial enquiry into how these people got into the country without passing the entrance test.
A LOCOG official said, “these are our games and this is a serious matter” he went on to promise a full investigation; threatening to cancel the rest of the fortnight and take his games home with him.