Family Research Council nutjob Tony Perkins is railing against candy maker Just Born, Inc. because its latest ad has longtime confectionery couple Mike and Ike splitting. Though the campaign never suggests the duo’s relationship was romantic, Perkins went off during a recent radio spot and criticized the company for “sexualizing candy.”

“It’s just another subtle example of society chipping away at the value of marriage,” he said. “And I don’t know what’s more disturbing–that advertisers think divorce appeals to kids or that sexualizing candy will make people buy more. After a year-long build-up, the company will reveal if the couple reconciles. Until then, look for Mike & Ike to have a distinctly liberal flavor.”

Um, who thinks Tony is revealing more about himself there than anything else?

Well, to irritate Perkins (not that it’s hard to do) Tees with ‘Tude has just released a line of satirical shirts, hats, aprons and other Day-Glo green merchandise bearing the phrase “Mike & Ike: The Original Fruity Gay Candy Corrupting The Youth Of America.”

A link to the site was sent to Queerty by TWT founder Larry Peck, who’s also responsible for “Chick-fil-gay” and “Gay Marriage Killed the Dinosaurs” shirts.

I haven’t had Ike & Mike since I was a kid. I was at Walgeens the other day and they had them at the checkout stand. I bought some since Tony (or is it with an “I”) brought to our attention that since the breakup they have been injected with sex. So I got home prepared for an orgasmic experience but alas, it was anti-climatic :-(