Tuesday, October 6, 2015

"I'm feeling 32 uh uh uh uh"

I've got to say, I'm loving my 30s. I was a hot mess in my 20s. I felt that everything Claire did was a reflection of my parenting (usually in a bad way) which I beet myself up about constantly. The letters coming home from preschool may as well have said I pulled someone's hair, sip on a class mate and kicked a teacher for all the self-hate I threw my own way. I remember the shame and embarrassment vividly but even if I didn't I could just go back and read my old blogs (those notes home or wounded pride and many others).

We are way too hard on ourselves moms! Now I see those letters and think, sounds about like what would have happened if Claire had been home all day with her sisters. Why did I expect my child to magically transform into an obedient cherub at school? She's a little human with spunk and opinions and Down Syndrome, she is going be herself all the time. What a relief this revolution has been to me! I don't have to feel bad or take blame for her mistakes. My job is to love her and help her learn these lessons in her messy, really life with her real life consequences. Not cleaning up after her and making excuses for her but by letting the consequences be the teacher. Yesterday she wrote an apology note to her teacher because that's what you do when you mess up, not what your mom does for you.

My poor other kids, they totally missed out on that 20 something, kid-centering, do everything for you mama. Forgot your home work, bummer I guess you will need to work that out with your teacher. Broke your sisters toy, you are replacing it. Don't like this meal, guess you'll be making your own PB&J. Trust me precious, you would rather learn to remember your stuff now then in collage or on the job. I'm just training you for real life, your welcome.

Just because I was feeling silly, a little modified Taylor Swift for you 32.

It feels like a perfect night to dress up like princess

And make fun with our toddlers, uh uh uh uh
It feels like a perfect night for potty brakes at midnight
I miss my bladder control uh uh uh uh
Yeaaaah
All our friends have babies at the same time
It's adorable and responsable oh yeah
Tonight's the night when we freak out about the deadlines, it's time uh uh

I don't know about you but im feeling 32
Everything will be alright if you keep caffeine next to you
You know about even if you didn't want to
Everything will be alright if we just keep blogging like we're 32, 32

It seems like one of those nights
This place is too crowded too many hormones
It seems like one of those nights
We ditch the whole screen, get a sitter instead of sleeping
Yeaaaah
We're going to pay for it tomorrow in the best way
It's miserable and magical oh yeah
Tonight's the night when we go to bed at eight fifteen, it's time uh uh

I don't know about you but im feeling 32
Everything will be alright with all these kids next to you
You know about me and I bet you feel me too
Everything will be alright if we just keep zumba-ing like we're 32, 32

mini van for you, 32, 32

It feels like one of those nights
We watch the whole Downton Abby
It feels like one of those nights
We won't be leaving
It feels like one of those nights
You look like a coffee brake I gotta have you, I gotta have you

Laundry pile for days im feeling 32
Everything will be alright if you keep pinterest next to you
You haven't slept soundly but I bet you want to
Everything will be alright if we just keep napping like we're 32, 32

Bloggining like 32, yeah, 32, yeah yeah

It feels like one of those nights
We watch the whole Parenthood
It feels like one of those nights
We may or may not be sleeping
It feels like one of those nights