Love Me Like You Do.

I posted a photo of my senior pictures the other day on instagram (@passingwhimsies if you want to check it out), and it was interesting the responses I got from people. Nothing bad at all (lots of super sweet comments!), but people were just saying how princess like I looked and how the vintage look suited me. Sometimes I miss dressing in vintage; I really do. Posting that photo reminded me of who I used to be and how much I've changed. Not that I don't like who I am right now and how I dress, because I do. I guess I just never saw myself like this. I didn't ever expect to start getting into the style of clothes I am now or wearing my hair a certain way or looking to certain things for inspiration. I just figured I would always dress in vintage and it would be a passion of mine. And it still is-- I still drool over photos of beautiful vintage dresses and when I come across them in the thrift store I almost always can't pass them up. But as a day to day dressing style it's just not conducive with my life anymore. It became a persona for me and I felt like people weren't seeing me for Lauren, but for the 'retro girl' who was fun to look at. I wasn't into what I was wearing and sacrificed warmth, comfort, and accessibility for wearing these super delicate pieces. As a college student going to and from classes and living in a state where the weather stinks about 85% of the time, it just got too hard.

I miss aspects of vintage style dressing like the awesome community of gals it is. It's such a niche style of dressing and all of the friends I made when I wore head to toe vintage was amazing. And I miss just the respect of it, as silly as it sounds. People respected me and noticed me a lot more. It wasn't an every day thing to see someone dressed that nicely or a style so different, so I was able to be treated in a different way and admired differently. As vain as that sounds (super vain and I hate myself for it admittingly) but, I miss it. I just feel ordinary now like there's nothing particularity special about how I dress. Anyone can dress how I do-- it's not hard, it's not definable...it's just kind of 'meh' to be honest.

I don't know, I'm just in a really confused state of my personal style right now. Posting that throw back photo of me wearing vintage brought up a lot of feelings. I feel like people don't like me as much when I'm not wearing vintage. It sounds weird and stupid but it's true. There's not something quirky, interesting, and sweet about me anymore. There's just this confused style that can't make up its mind. The problem is, I don't want to necessarily go back to the style I was doing. That wouldn't fix things because I don't feel like it represents me anymore after all the experiences and growing I've had. So I'm trying to find a new place where I feel confident and secure in my way of dress like when I found vintage. I don't know if it will be more boho like in this post; European; or the slight retro twist on modernity. It also doesn't mean I still don't love vintage and want to dress in it from time to time because it does make me feel beautiful and it is still a part of who I am. I guess what I'm trying to say is I just don't want it to be what I'm known for and expected of. I want the outside of me to fit the new inside I feel.

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lovely little notes:

Girl, I think your style right now is super inspiring! I love your taste, and am constantly impressed by the way you put pieces together. And you definitely still have a vintage flair that we see now and again, mixed with more modern pieces. And just generally, you're a fantastic thrifter, which sort of has the same essence as wearing vintage -- the idea of giving new life to old garments. I think your style is so on point!

I loved reading your blog when you were an all vintage girl, but I love it even more now! You have grown up so much and you get more beautiful with every passing year, both inside and out! The vintage phase was really fun and great for occasional wear, but I think what you wear now is so much more creative and fashion-forward! I love this outfit a ton, and I would definitely stop to tell you how nice you looked (or I would if I was more brave, I'd be likelier to admire you from afar). You look like a seriously cool chick, and this is perfect for Nordstrom!

The thing about personal style is that it's ever changing. When you stopped wearing solely vintage clothes is when you actually started embracing your personal style. It's totally okay if you want to wear a dress one day and trousers the next--that's what personal style is!

You didn't get the readership you have from vintage dressing, you got it from your own personality.

You're just as interesting now than you were when you were vintage. So no worries!

Sweet Lauren - the wonderful thing about personal style is that it is always evolving, and you shouldn't feel guilty that your aesthetic has changed a bit. It's especially difficult as a college student to wear beautiful vintage things. I barely had any sense of style in college, and it wasn't until after I graduated that I really started to get into fashion at all. You shouldn't be worried about not fitting into a certain category of style or disappointing followers by not wearing retro-inspired clothing. Your style will continue to evolve as the years go by, and I think it only makes you more interesting that you have a different mish-mosh of styles in your wardrobe! Your fashion has to suit your needs at a particular point in your life. Maybe you'll embrace vintage clothing again at some point, maybe just for certain occasions, or maybe you won't. We grow and change, and our fashion sense does too! Anyone who is worth his/her salt will love going on that journey with you.

I immediately thought you looked beautiful in this outfit. The colors suit you nicely!

Interesting thoughts on clothing. I suppose to a certain extent people do judge/treat you based on your clothing (I actually just wrote a post about that!) Bottom line-wear what YOU like, what YOU feel comfortable in. If you dress for other people, or to be noticed, you'll end up being miserable and wearing clothes you don't even like (btdt!) NatashaA modest fashion blog: www.natashaatkerson.blogspot.com

One word: experiment. I've been reading your blog for a while and I really dig your style. Even if it changes everyday. And I think what you're going through is what I'm going through, the "WHO AM I" phase. One thing that has helped me is dressing around a theme or aesthetic. Like listen, I'll wear an outfit inspired by Lara Croft Tomb Raider... but that's not wholly who I am. A part of me is a total badass, but a part of me is hippie and vintage. Use your style to play with elements of who you are, which I think you already do... so just go bigger in pushing your style. Push yourself - find out who you are.

And that's the beauty of personal style: it changes as you change. I personally went from being an all-black kind of girl to a vintage / frilly dresses lover to a classic work appropriate style. And I love how my blog documented these transitions. I was looking at you on Instagram a while ago and noticed how much you have changed, but in nothing but a very positive way. You have become a very beautiful woman and I hope that you can find "you" again soon! xo

It's so weird that you would say that because I was honestly just thinking about how much I feel your style has improved over the years?! I dig the vintage look, but long hair and lots of black is way more my style. I think your new look really suits you lady.

I love how honest you are in your post! I think, our style evolves with us and our experiences, I'm sure you will find a style that fit your new mentality. I was just wondering if maybe you could write a post about your experience in Italy. I plan on studying abroad in England next autumn and I'd love to hear about how you found your time there !! :)

I think the hardest part about finding your style is patience - because it doesn't come when you want it to, and it's very hard to track down. But you knew that already. ;)I want to wish you all the best in your style journey - and for what it's worth, I think you're doing a marvelous job at dressing elegantly, even in the interim.

I feel the same way! I use to wear vintage dresses almost every day and now, it just doesn't fit my stage of life. But honestly, I love your style! You have a unique and different take on style and I appreciate it.

i liked your style then, & i adore your style now. i don't think that just anybody can put outfits together the way you can because you have your own unique point of view. that artistic eye & creative part. that's you lauren. i also think you're brave with your openness & honesty. i admire your writing & style. you're more than just one thing. you're many things. of course you're gonna grow & change. we all do. if we didn't life would be boring & stale. it's nice to see how strong you are. i'm proud of how you are taking care of yourself.

I’m Lauren. A 23 year old recent transplant to NYC and the blogger behind this nook of the internet. This is the place where I write out my soul, bare my heart, and welcome you to do the same. Grab a warm cup of something and stay awhile. x