On Washington Post Live

Dan Steinberg here.

Do you care what I think about Washington Post Live, our exciting new venture into the world of boring live TV talk shows? No, you do not. How do I know this? Because of my seven phone numbers and 14 e-mail addresses and multiple blog comment spaces, I've received a total of maybe 20 responses about the first two days of the show, 15 of which were mostly indifferent, four of which were negative, and one of which made me want to jump off a bridge. But since I'm spending all my paternity leave driving back and forth to Bethesda and thinking about my next career move, I have nothing else to write about right now. Yes, that's right, we're slaying the Bog in order to make me look bad on TV. Awesome.

Anyhow, some notes:

Personal highlight: Our makeup lady, Kim, told me yesterday that if I keep appearing on TV I might want to consider something called thermage, which involves lasers beating on the bags under your eyes until they explode or something like that. Seriously, Kim is very nice, but I should have just left the building at that point. Then my friends at Comcast SportsyNet broadcast a clip of Kim applying my makeup. Thanks, friends. Appreciate it. I've said many times that my only TV goal was not to completely humiliate myself, and I already failed on Day Two. Oh, and Kim also told me I needed to shave.

Viewing highlight: When host Russ Thaler paused yesterday to say something like, "I still can't believe we have Robert Novak on our set." I mean, I love Russ, but it's not like it was the Pope, or, a Geico caveman, or someone really important like that. It was Robert Novak. Robert Novak has blabbed on every television station ever created. And even if you're impressed with your guests, you have to pretend you're not. You just can't appear sad and striving. Like, last night I interviewed Leslie Nielsen at a party featuring the Stanley Cup. A bad question would have been, "Oh my God, I can't believe I'm interviewing Leslie Nielsen." A better question would have been, "What's older, you or the Stanley Cup?" Although Leslie Nielsen answered that question with something about the Canadian premiership, which I didn't exactly understand.

Best line I never used: Yesterday I made reference to George Washington's Farewell Address. I wanted to add, "an event Bob Novak actually covered for The Post," but I chickened out. Two demerits for me. Anyhow, when I started quoting George Washington, my colleagues looked at me like I had Bloody Mary-flavored celery stalks growing out of my ears, so I just tried to wrap that bit up as quickly as possible.

Best way to suck up to Georgetown and GW fans: As I've said all along, I have no strong feelings about any local schools, but I found myself filled with that lower NW D.C. sense of slight yesterday, when the show featured three special guests talking about Maryland basketball and zero special guests talking about Georgetown's men or GW's women, both of which are in the Sweet 16. For counting purposes, let's note that Maryland has a combined zero teams in the Sweet 16. The Colonial women wouldn't even have been mentioned once yesterday had I not snuck in a quick reference right at the end of the show. Please, someone, book Joe McKeown as soon as possible.

[Edit: I've just been informed that Joe McKeown will be live on set today. So I take it all back.]

Wardrobe highlight: I kept telling the Comcast SportsyNet execs that I would look dumb without a suit on, that I would look sloppy and immature and stupid. They disagreed, arguing that I had to look like me. So for two days, I've looked like me. And then people started writing in to tell me I looked sloppy and immature and stupid. Including my wife. Anyhow, I don't own any suits that fit, so don't expect a change if you watch today, which you won't.

Most optimistic thought: I realized during yesterday's show that if I just start enthusiastically cursing on set one of these days, they'll have no choice but to kick me off, and then I can get back to writing summaries of Gilbert Arenas's blog.

I watched most of the episode the first night. I didn't have a chance to see it last night. At parts the show is really great and kinda funny, and at other parts the show is painfully dragging on. That's comcast's fault for making it an hour and a half show. And I think you should continue to go sans suit but + backwards hat/fedora. That is you, Steinz! If it's any consolation, my mother said you looked like "a cute little boy."

A lot of bog readers live outside of the Washington area so we don't get to see your TV show. We do, however, note that your replacements are basically ignoring the sports bog, with 1 or 2 posts per day max.

What is it with Post reporters obsession with telling everyone in print all the funny things they wish they'd said on television? You and Tony K are like Costanza chasing that guy around trying to use the "Jerk store" retort.

Well in my eyes the best part of the show is the 5 minute Bog TV segment and not just because I was on it last night. (I didn't like that you could here me laughing while filming) Believe me I think Littles and Beenie are doing a great job but the same stuff comes out of the guests as on any talk radio and TV show with writers.

Dan
i saw the show on Monday. i think first of all Wise needs to dress his age. He should consider going on the show:
"What not to wear"
Why does Wise try to be 'ultra chic' and swank?
He's on a talk show not American Idol, so he should wear a suit and tie - as should you. Wise should dress his age, he is what 40? why does he tr to dress like a 22 yr old going out to a club like 'Play'

I'm sorry! I guess I just sorta thought a superstar like yourself doesn't need feedback and ego massaging, but now that I think about it... I guess I should've said something other than on my blog that you don't have time to read these days ;-) Thanks for the shoutout! I, of course, thought that was the best part, but then again, I haven't seen last night's yet and the presidents race stuff will probably trump my own 5 seconds of fame.

1) Steinz, I think you need to speak clearer and project more. I don't really know what "project" means in this context, but it sounds like a good TV thing to say.

2) I don't really care what anyone wears or if they shave or not. If I like the content, guests, and conversation, I'll watch it.

3) So did I like the show? It was a bit awkward in places, but I'd give it a 7.0--and that's based on just the first night, which means it will probably get better (I turned it off at 5:05 after I didn't see Dan's shiny head anywhere. Ego boost delivered.).

4) How is it that Ovie was quoted in yesterday's Post but couldn't talk on Monday night? Did he draw little stick figures for Tarik?

I get the feeling Ovy didn't wantto be seen on the tube with a bunch of thread in his lip. I completely understand as that's probably not a pleasent sight. I would also agree that you should bring the fedora back Dan. It was definately something unique to you and I thought it looked good on you. Hopefully you will all get some time to let the program find its way before it gets canned.

I've seen all of 10 seconds of the show. The one day I had time for TV and was home, my roommate that is entirely disinterested in sports was watching Discovery HD already. I feel like the time slot is your biggest foe.

Thanks for the support, Jim Hrivnak. Believe me, I placed a call to my editor last night saying he needed to get me off the show asap, but sometimes it's not that simple. Do you have a boss, Jim Hrivnak? Has he or she ever made you do anything you didn't want to do? Like, for example, use regular writing styles but then suddenly BUST OUT THE CAPS?

Got home uncharacteristically early yesterday and caught you on the show.

Friends will tell you the truth straight out, so chalk me up as a friend:

On TV you are potentially very interesting and funny. But you are hamstrung. That closing bit about "what do you say about that?" or whatever was *lame.* You and the other guests aren't given enough to interact and speak extemporaneously, which I've no doubt would be a good format for you. Just answering questions from a too-rigid, too-un-ESPN_fun guy, is too, um, boring.

I *loved* it when you said we needed a new closing bit. See, that's edgy and bog-like -- like those self-referential digs Letterman does about NBC.

I loved the Stanley Cup piece -- but, hey, see, that was you getting to kick it with some people without some lame, corporate structure superimposed.

Someone's got to let you guys talk more, have less control from the host, and let the stuff get more real casual and less forced casual.

It's not you. It's the show.

"but it's not like it was the Pope, or, a Geico caveman, or someone really important like that" LOL!