A mother was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her son. Suddenly the
boy burst into the kitchen.

"Careful! CAREFUL! Put in some more butter!
Oh my goodness!
You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!
Turn them! TURN THEM NOW!
We need more butter.
Oh my WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?
They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL!!!
I said be CAREFUL!!
You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never!
Turn them! Hurry up!
Are you CRAZY! Have you LOST your mind?
Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!!"

The mother stared at him.
"What is wrong with you?
You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The son calmly replied . . .
"I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm trying to
play soccer."