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Landscape Urbanists and New Urbanists to Settle Debate After Class, Behind the Gym

April 1, 2011, 10am PDT

After months of debate over which ideology should guide the future of cities and urban development, New Urbanists and Landscape Urbanists at Harvard University are planning to settle the argument with a fistfight.

The New Urbanists, led by Andres Duany, argue that the subdivisions of the suburbs must be rejected wholecloth, while the Landscape Urbanists, led by Charles Waldheim, argue that ecologically sustainable landscape methods can be used to make the suburbs better and more resilient places.

The debate has sent a rumble through the once solid foundations of urbanism at Harvard's Graduate School of Design.

The two factions have been at loggerheads, and decided that the only reasonable resolution would be an old fashioned rumble, this afternoon, after class, behind the gym.

"We're going to show them where they can stick their quaint front porches," one Landscape Urbanist said as he prepared for the fight.

"They want to talk about ecological infrastructure," said a New Urbanist. "Well, we're going to re-arrange their facial infrastructure."

Campus police have been informed of the scheduled fight, and have agreed not to intervene.

New Urbanists will win!!

As they are pumped up with all that coffee sipped while furiously banging away at their laptops, trying to redesign the catastrophic projects of the 20th century into a 21st century walkable community.