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dragon

So here’s the next two chapters of my incredibly weird story. Weird on.

~~~

“We have defeated the mighty dragon!” Apple Jack’s voice rang through the streets of Equestria as she and her two bird friends returned home after the battle with Alexor.
“Oh, you have?” said Ashley in a tone that suggested she did not care much about whether or not Apple Jack defeated the dragon. “Really? I didn’t know. Hey, Dakota, baby?”
“Yes?”
“Do you know where my necklace is?”
Dakota gasped. “No! What happened to your necklace?”
“I don’t know! I had it one minute and the next minute it was gone!”
“It must be the Shadow Horses,” said Apple Jack. “Fiona probably took it.”
“What?” said Ashley slowly, not responding to the “Fiona probably took it” part.
“Shadow Horses,” Apple Jack repeated.
“Fiona and May,” said Clementine. “And Romeo, too. They’re all Shadow Horses.”
“Yeah – wait – what?” said Ashley. “Oh my goodness! I knew it! Your little boyfriend,” she looked directly at Kayleen, who was standing about fifteen feet from her, “is a Shadow Horse!”
“What?” said Kayleen.
“Yes, Romeo!” said Ashley enthusiastically. “Your boyfriend! He’s a Shadow Horse!”
“No,” said Kayleen, unable to comprehend what Ashley had just said. “It couldn’t have been him.”
“It was!” said Ashley pompously.
“It was,” said Apple Jack gravely.
“Raak! It was! It was!” said Phoenix matter-of-factly. “We fought him!”
“But he disappeared at the last moment,” said Clementine. “Awark! Stinking piece of tripe.”
“Wh-what?” said Kayleen, and burst into tears.
“He’s a Shadow Horse,” said Ashley impatiently, stamping her hoof.
“Just forget about her,” she said casually. Then she turned to Drover, who was peeking between the planks of a fence around one of the barns. “Drover, I don’t know what you’re feeling. You are just so weird.”
Clementine clucked her tongue. “For once, I have to agree with her.”
“Oh, come on, guys, be nice,” said Apple Jack. “I like him because he’s really cute.” She kissed him on the nose and walked away.
“She kissed me!” said Drover in his weird voice. It was high and wobbly. “Heehee!” He jumped away on his hind legs.
“Huh,” said Clementine, watching him bounce around the perimeter of Equestria Square. “Never heard him talk before.”
“Heehee, hello, have a nice day,” said Phoenix, trying to imitate the ridiculous horse. Clementine just looked annoyed.
“I just hope we didn’t hurt Kayleen’s feelings,” she said. “That wouldn’t be good.”
“Yeah, she really liked you,” said Phoenix, abandoning his attempt to sound like Drover. “Raak!”
“Maybe we should’ve let off a little easier,” said Clementine. She walked over to where Drover was, chipper as ever, still bouncing resolutely, although he had just ran into a wall and missed the door to his barn. “Araak. You Ok?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah…”
She looked annoyed. Suddenly Andy burst out of the king’s barn where he worked. “Apple Jack!” he yelled. “Where are you?”
“Right here,” she said in a pleased voice, walking up to him. “I love you.”
“You’re not a unicorn anymore!” said Clementine.
“Yeah, okay,” she said. “Everybody, we can go to sleep now.”
“Definitely,” every horse in Equestria said. They had stayed up all night the previous evening due to Alexor’s roar, and it was evening anyway.
“Goodnight,” everyone said, and all over Equestria Square barn doors closed as the sun went down. Except two.
One was Drover, who was still singing, “Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah”. The other was the one that belonged to Kayleen. She had enclosed herself at the far end of her pasture and was silently weeping for her Romeo as her barn door creaked gently, and at the end she cried herself to a deep, dreamless sleep.

In the middle of the night, Apple Jack gasped. “Oh my goodness!” she cried. “I’m a unicorn!”
Clementine yawned. “What are you doing, yelling at the top of your lungs in the middle of the night? Wake up half of Equestria, you will!”
“But I’m a unicorn!”
“I know, I know.”
“But that’s impossible!”
“Remember when you put Alexor in the air? I think he must have cast an enchantment on you. A unicorn by night and a horse by day.”
“Oh no!”
“I’m sorry, but that’s the truth.”
“Oh no! How do I break it?”
“I don’t know.”
Apple Jack paused. “They say in fairy tales that a kiss can make or break a spell,” she said. “I’ll get my brother to kiss me in the morning. But by the morning …” Clementine looked at her with wide eyes. “By the morning it’ll be too late! I have to go wake him.”
“No, no, no,” said Clementine, shaking her head. “He’s assistant to the king now, remember? You’ll wake the king, too, and who knows what he’ll do. Banish you to the Forests of Chanter to say the least. Raak!”
“Oh, no, you’re right!” cried Apple Jack. She thought for a few seconds before saying, “Thunder!”
“You don’t need Thunder,” Clementine said. “I think – ”
“I’ll get him to kiss me!” Apple Jack cried.
“No, I think it’s the Shadow Horses,” said Clementine.
“I have to get kissed by a Shadow Horse? Eeew!”
“No,” said Clementine with a frown. “When the Shadow Horses are gone the enchantment will be broken and you will get to remain either a horse or a unicorn forever.”
“Oh, a horse hopefully,” said Apple Jack.
“Yeah, unicorns are cool, but I couldn’t give up wings. Oh, hello, Phoenix.”
Phoenix had just stepped up to them. “I’m really sad for her.”
“Who?”
“Kayleen.”
“Yeah. I don’t know how she can bear it all.”
“Well,” said Apple Jack, “I’m going back to sleep, and hopefully this nightmare is going to end!” She left for her barn and slammed the door.
“Somehow I don’t think it’s a nightmare,” said Clementine. “Do you, Phoenix?”
“Slap me.”
Clementine thwacked him hard on the back with her wing. “Ow!” he yelled. She did it again. And again. “Okay! Not a nightmare! Oww! Ow! Okay! That’s enough!” It had become a wrestling match between the two siblings.
“Okay, not a nightmare,” said Clementine, satisfied. “Just don’t tell our night mare.”
“What about the nightmare? Oh my goodness, what about the night mare? Could she have cast the spell on AJ?”
“The night mare?” said Clementine, annoyed. “You don’t get it, do you?”
“I have nightmares about her!”
“I’m talking about Apple Jack, you dodo!”
“Oh, sorry,” said Phoenix. “I’m just tired. I’m going back to sleep.”
“Okay. I think I’ll go check on Kayleen, though. I haven’t heard a peep out of her all night, and she usually snores something terrible. See you.”
“Well, okay. Just try not to wake her up.” Too late. Clementine had disappeared. “Okay. Whatever.” Phoenix left to go to bed.

The next morning, when the rooster crowed atop the hay bale that was Cinnie, Equestria Square was still fast asleep. Except Dakota. He had risen bright and early that morning, and with a slight yawn he leapt over his fence. “Life,” he said. “Oh, come on, Star of my Life.”
“You know, Ashley would do,” said Ashley, annoyed. She had been asleep. “But hey there anyway.” She jumped the fence and gave Dakota a little kiss, and together they walked off.
As they left, Clementine landed on top of Cinnie. He was still a hay bale. Apple Jack was awake too. “Hey, Clementine,” she said.
“Raak,” said Clementine. “Hi there, Apple Jack.”
“Hi.”
“What are you doing?”
“I’m getting my apples for the day.” There was a smack as she kicked them down.
“You know, today might be the day,” said Clementine. “We could defeat the Shadow Horses, and you could be a horse forever.”
Apple Jack was too busy admiring her fresh, shiny apples to listen. “What nice apples,” she said to herself. “I’ll put them in the refrigerator later. They’d make a spanking good apple pie, and – hey, Thunder, what’s up?” The pinto stallion was looking at her.
“You mean in the sky? What?” He looked up, squinting.
“The clouds, the sun – no, silly, I meant what’s up today. Like, with you.” She touched him on the nose with one hoof.
“Oh, not much. Just a-hanging out, BABY!” He started prancing circles around her.
“You’re weird.”
“I know. I’m not as weird as Drover, though.”
“Oh, Thunder!” Clementine said.
“What?”
“We wanted to ask you something.”
“Yep-e-dadoozles.” He gasped. “Is this about my dirty hoof? I’m sorry, I didn’t clean it! Oh my goodness, this is terrible!”
“It’s not about your hoof,” said Clementine with a frown. “As you probably know, Apple Jack has been having a bit of a… unicorn predicament, and we wondered if something you could do could help her.”
“What?”
“You know, like in the stories, a prince’s kiss breaks the spell?” Clementine was half-holding her breath. She could imagine only too well the reckless stallion’s reaction to her indirectly calling him a prince.
He gasped. “MY APPLE JACK!” he said, grabbing her with his two front hooves as well as he could without knocking her flat on her back. “MY BEAUTIFUL APPLE JACK!”
“Okay, you don’t have to do that,” said Apple Jack, annoyed. “Here, just – go ahead…”
Then they kissed.

~~~

So… if you’re reading this that means you probably just sat through Part 3 of the weirdest story on earth. Thumbs up to you.

Here’s the next two chapters of the weirdest story in the world. Enjoy, and don’t be afraid to stare at the screen thinking “What did I just read??!!”

~~~

The rooster that lived in the streets of Equestria crowed to announce the new day’s beginning. Rose, who had been left unconscious in the streets, groaned and stood up.
“Hey, Rose, you’re up!” said Dakota, who had just walked out of his barn. “You fainted and we just left you there.”
“Oh, well that’s nice,” said the eight-year-old filly grumpily.
“Oh, what a beautiful day,” said Ashley, galloping into the streets to join her boyfriend. “And the Prissy family isn’t around here anywhere.”
“Neither is the dragon, thankfully,” said Rose.
“So, hey, did you hear?” said Ashley, always one to spread gossip. “Romeo is actually in the work of the Dragon Lord.”
“I know,” said Dakota. “We found out after you passed out.”
“What? Why Romeo?” said a familiar voice. “I’d blame it on those two Prissies any day.”
“Whoa, when did you get here, Kayleen?” said Dakota with a small jump.
“When did I get here?” she said testily. Just now, but long enough to know that you’re blaming all that on my little Romeo.”
“Well, he did,” said Ashley in a rude matter-of-fact voice. “They said that there was a black horse up on the mountain with the dragon, fighting the birds.”
“Are you saying that was Romeo?” said Kayleen fiercely. “It could’ve easily been someone like me.”
Dakota gasped. “So you’re saying you did it.”
“No.”
“You did it!”
“I didn’t do it!”
“What’re you guys talking about?” said Spirit, marching up to them. “Wait, I already know. Hey, Dakota, son. I know who we could ask. Hold on, just a moment.”
“Phoenix, come on!” said Spirit. “Yes?” he said sleepily, walking up to the horses.
“Were the horses on the mountain boys or girls?”
“Well, there was, let’s see, two boys and one girl. Raak!”
“What did they look like?”
“They were all black horses, for one thing. Raak! There was one that looked like he had dead eyes, and there was a second one, raak, that was black with a star on his face, and two white hooves. Then the last one was a female, and she kind of looked like you, Kayleen.”
“Any differences?”
“Well, yes. She looked just like the last male. Still, it could be make up. Raak!”
“What? It wasn’t me! You believe me, don’t you, Spirit? You know I never would!” There was a tear running down Kayleen’s cheek, and a note of desperation had crept into her voice.
“You could be putting on a show,” said Ashley with a scowl.
“Of course I’m not!” cried Kayleen. “You know I’m not.”
“Hey, so what’re you guys talking about?” said Apple Jack, walking up to them cheerfully.
“The dragon,” said Kayleen dully.
“Oh, yeah, Romeo was up there,” said Ashley in an almost cheerful way.
“Oh, sorry, I won’t say the word,” said Kayleen.
“What word?” said Apple Jack.
“The D word. D-R-A-G-O-N.”
Apple Jack shivered. “I’m getting cold.”
“I didn’t mean to,” said Kayleen worriedly, taking a step back. The by-now familiar unicorn chime sounded somewhere in the distance. Apple Jack was once again the snow-white, glittering unicorn.
“Hey, unicorn!” said Phoenix abruptly, spinning around. He gasped. “You can fight the dragon!”
“Don’t say it,” said Kayleen, but it was too late. The transformation wasn’t coming easy. Apple Jack was rolling on the ground, white hooves flailing in the air. It was actually pretty funny.
“Counter that,” said Kayleen quickly. “Dragon.” Apple Jack stopped at once and got up. “Okay,” said Kayleen, turning to Ashley, Dakota, and Spirit (Rose had long since walked away). “None of you say the D word. She needs to stay a unicorn. How else is she going to fight the… thing?”
“What’s going on over here?” yelled a voice. It was an appaloosa named Andy. “Where’s my sister?”
“Charlotte?” said Kayleen.
“No, my sister’s not Charlotte! My sister’s Apple Jack!”
“Well, there’s been a slight bit of a…” Her voice trailed off.
“I’m Apple Jack,” said the unicorn.
“No, you’re not,” said Andy.
“Umm… Andy?” said Kayleen tentatively. “Your sister’s a unicorn.”
“What?” said Andy incredulously.
“She’s the only one who can fight the – thing,” said Kayleen.
Clementine walked over. Disgruntled by the sudden amount of crowdedness, Ashley left.
“Can I finish the story now?” said Phoenix impatiently.
“We’ve heard all we need,” said Apple Jack. “Now we can go up to the mountains!”
“You can do it!” said Kayleen encouragingly.
“Raak! Is your wing still hurt?” asked Phoenix.
“Nope, all better,” said Clementine. “Seems that unicorn’s magic made it.”
“Okay.” Apple Jack jumped into the air – and stayed!
“I can fly!” she yelled down, although she was barely six feet off the ground. Clementine and Phoenix lofted into the air to join her. “We could always fly,” said Phoenix. “But good for you.”
They gained altitude at a surprisingly fast rate until, at last, they reached the huge mountains. They were full of rocks of all colors: gray, white, red, gold-like beige, and even a strange bluish color. “Wow!” exclaimed Apple Jack. “We can see all of Equestria from up here!” The land of Equestria – and even Chanter, a wilderness beyond Equestria, folded out beneath the mountain.
“I see something else,” said Clementine, squinting. “Hey, it looks like a horse!”

Romeo!” said Apple Jack in surprise. “I thought you were with Kayleen!”
“Huh, Kayleen,” said Romeo, and the three friends noticed his eyes were gray. Dead eyes! Although no one said it out loud, each knew what the others were thinking. “Couldn’t care less about her. Nor could my master, Alexor, the Dragon Lord of the Mountains!” He stepped back
“I knew it! Raak!” yelled Phoenix as the terrible sight greeted them.
Alexor was there. He was dark green with yellow eyes and huge yellowish claws. His wings were as big as rooftops and had humongous claws on them. His teeth were as long as daggers, and he had two horns that curled behind his head. He was majestic, but in a horrible way.
Alexor roared. It seemed to shake the very mountaintop on which they stood; he was thunder and an earthquake and a tornado all rolled up in one. His eyes glinted evilly as he slashed out with one claw. Looking directly at Apple Jack, he struck, missing her by a bare inch. “Stand and fight, horse!” he roared, swaying his long green neck menacingly. Apple Jack took a few steps back.
“Raak! Raak! Raak! I will defeat you! I am a Bird Warrior! Hiyyaa!” Phoenix knocked him into the rocks behind the bird with a force that knocked his breastplate off, but the mighty Alexor wasn’t fazed. While he was still knocked over on the side of the mountain Clementine rolled him over the edge of the cliff with one smack with her talons, but with one beat of his vast scaly wings, he was back up, eyes glinting dangerously, huge spiked tail swaying behind him.
Apple Jack, though sweating profusely, took a few kicks against his chest that ended in the same smack sound she loved so much that always rang in her ears when she kicked down her beloved apples. With one easy swoosh of his mighty claws Apple Jack went spinning. “My horn is hurt,” she said through gritted teeth, wincing in pain.
Phoenix covered up for her. With one bite from his large black beak he sent Alexor sprawling headfirst, then he and Clementine lifted the huge dragon up by the tail.
“Raak! I got him! I got him!” Phoenix squawked. “Raak! Raak!”
With a deafening swoosh and an immense wave of freezing air, Alexor flapped and pulled free of the two bird’s grip, but the Bird Warrior and his sister were not giving up so easily. Again Clementine seized on of the mighty dragon’s horns while her brother grabbed his tail. Phoenix was flapping like a mad bird, all the while yelling, “Meet your fate! I am the Bird Warrior! Raak!”
Apple Jack was not fighting. While the air filled with deafening screeches, roars, and “Meet your fate!”s, she was struggling to rise.
Clementine too was beginning to get the warrior flair her brother had. “Raak! The dragon’s reign shall end today! Araaaaak!”
Phoenix was crying his crazy battle chants, Clementine was batting Alexor over the head, and apple Jack was now standing, weak but raising her horn ferociously. She wasn’t attacking, however.
“What about AJ?” said Phoenix. “She’s not fighting with us!”
“She’s the only way we’ll ever defeat him!” squawked Clementine. “Get up, get up! Fight!”
“I’m too scared,” whimpered Apple Jack. “He hurt my horn, and I certainly don’t want to do that again!”
Alexor roared again, and Apple Jack groaned. She stepped backwards.
“Apple Jack!” said Clementine. “We can hold him back, but we can’t destroy him. Get up, get up and fight with us!”
“So, I’m the only way?’ said Apple Jack hopelessly.
“Araaaak!” cried Clementine, aiming a slash at Alexor’s neck.
“Yes you are, you’re the only way!” cried Phoenix, landing on Apple Jack’s snow-white back.
“You’re the way! You’re the way!” yelled Phoenix, beginning his wild battle cries again.
“You’re the only one that can do it!” cried Clementine urgently as Apple Jack reared up to join the fray.
“Araaaaaaaak!” Clementine cried as she felled Alexor with a blow to the side of his neck. Now crying “Meet your fate!” again, Phoenix began slashing at the great dragon’s tough, leathery wing, but his hide was so strong he barely left a mark.
Gathering her strength, Apple Jack concentrated the magic in her horn and, with it, made Alexor rise. His eyes widened, and he gave a confused half-roar. Higher and higher he rose until he was lost in the clouds. Apple Jack turned him sideways and dropped him. With another roar that grew softer and softer, Apple Jack dropped him over the side of the mountain and onto the land below, not on Equestria Square, but over into the moorland beyond where he could never harm another living creature again.
“Yay!” cried Apple Jack, prancing atop the mountain. “I defeated him, I think.”
“You did it, you did it!” said Clementine joyfully.
“I did!” Apple Jack brayed. Romeo walked up to them, chest puffed out, and said, “What have you done?”
“We defeated your Dragon Lord, evidently.” Apple Jack answered him proudly. She emphasized every syllable of the last word.
“There was no use for him anymore, as it was,” Romeo growled. “Today, a new reign shall begin.”
“Not you!” said Apple Jack fiercely.
“The reign of the Shadow Horses!” He held his head high. “And I have a few friends to show you. Come on out, girls!”
A horse stepped out of the shadows. “Fiona!” cried Apple Jack. And then another. “May?” They had been stripped of all their various apparel; May wore only a green rope tied around her neck and Fiona kept only her purple saddle blanket. One other thing was different, too; their eyes had attained that deadened look that Romeo’s had.
“Have you ever wondered who fathered May?” said Romeo. “Let me tell you that it was I that was Fiona’s husband.”
But Apple Jack was not listening. “Your eyes!” she shrieked. “What happened?”
“We too are now a part of this clan.” Now Fiona spoke. “The Shadow Horses are our true family.”
Phoenix leapt up onto Apple Jack’s head. “Raaaak! What have you done? Why are May and Fiona like that?”
“I thought I could trust you!” squawked Clementine angrily. She and Phoenix made to rake at the three Shadow Horses with their talons, but they vanished into thin air.
“Where’d they go?” said Clementine confusedly.
“They could be right behind us!” shrieked Phoenix, spinning around. “Reeeee! Everybody run around like crazy!” He calmed down slightly and looked confused. “Wait – where are they?”
There was a whacking noise, and Apple Jack was flat on the ground. Clementine hopped over to her. “They are Shadow Horses, aren’t they?” she said profoundly. “That we cannot comprehend, but we can fight this evil. Let us now return to Equestria to see our true friends and tell them about – ”
“Don’t you care about me?” yelled Phoenix. “I’m being tossed around like a ragdoll here!”
“Sorry, Phoenix,” said Clementine. “Our unicorn is – oh, for goodness’ sake, flip over.” Phoenix was rolling around on his back, bawling at the top of his lungs.
“I DON’T CARE!” he yelled. “RAAK RAAK RAAK RAAK RAAK RAAK RAAK!”
“I don’t care how loud you are,” said Clementine, drawing herself up proudly to her full height. “I shall fight by your side forever.”
“Oh, finally,” muttered Phoenix, and stalked off. “Something you can do with me.”
“Oh, well, you talk,” Clementine called after him. He turned around. “I thought birds took grammar class. Well, I took one, anyway! ‘Take me my sister’? Seriously?”
“Okay,” Phoenix said, “I messed up. Raak! Now, I can take the unicorn by my talons, on her horn… no, no, that’s not going to work…” He switched sides of the injured unicorn. “I can get her up by her back. Come on, Clementine. Raak!”

Like this:

I went to see this in theater a week ago with Amber and another of my friends. Amber’s a big How To Train Your Dragon fan, and she was planning the trip weeks in advance.
I have to say, I was not disappointed. The plot was totally different from the first movie, which was good, since a rip-off continuation of it wouldn’t sell very well. It was a good story, with a big twist about a quarter of the way through. It’s a giant change in the story, but I liked it a lot.
The animation was awesome. It must have taken forever to pull off scenes with giant dragon battles and… well, I don’t want to spoil anything!! All of the dragons were very well done, not to mention the people. The only thing I have against it is, even with the war scenes, there isn’t any blood shown. Then again, it’s animated, and animated blood is usually very awkward.
I honestly don’t know how to talk about this movie without spoiling things. It’s a very tightly knit story, with one thing leading to another, and it makes it easy to give spoilers.
The only thing you’re getting from me is that someone dies.
For awesome action, great story, and, of course, unforgettable characters, I give How To Train Your Dragon 2 four and a half stars. I recommend it for ages 5 and up.