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Like a Beaver Dam

Samantha is really frustrated. “I have been doing my healing work for years. I have tried many different techniques and they all helped, some more than others, but why am I still at this point in my life? Why have I not reached all my goals of abundance, health and the perfect relationship, yet? Why do I have to do more work? I want to finally be done.”

Samantha is not the only client sitting in front of me who express frustration with the fact that their inner work is still not complete. Their Inner Critic tells them that they should be clear and enlightened with no issues or struggles whatsoever because, after all, they have already worked on themselves, their fears, their beliefs, their emotions and their relationships.

At that point, I usually share with them my latest piece of personal work. And they typically say something along the lines of, “But you have been in this field for fourteen years! You should be done!” I also tell them that in my experience, the work never ends. Why is that? Doing our personal work is like peeling away the layers of an onion. Each layer allows us to go deeper. Life unfolds and we are nudged to peel away yet another layer.

Sometimes it is like working away on a beaver dam that blocks the flow of the river of our consciousness. This dam represents all our obstructions and blocks due to our limiting beliefs, fears, emotions and shadows. With each piece of debris we pull out, the river can flow better and we become more whole. With each stick, we broaden our conscious awareness of ourselves and the world.

When we do deeper work, it is also quite normal that resistance comes up. Our subconscious has many useful programs in place, in fact programs that help us to function and survive. If it was easy to change all those programs, our survival might be in danger. Changing subconscious programs requires engaging this resistance in just the right way and using techniques to access the subconscious mind. Dhebi DeWitz’s L.E.E.P.s are such Life Enhancing Energy Processes that can assist us with our inner work.

The past week held two bigger pieces of work and learning for myself. What came up for me was a shadow trait I needed to integrate and an emotional interference pattern I needed to release. An individual had been mirroring the shadow of being argumentative and opinionated to me. Being opinionated and in some way closed and inflexible is often a trait which is looked upon as difficult. I am the first to admit that at times I can be opinionated and I am sure others find that difficult or discouraging. Many topics I just let go of, because I frankly don’t care enough about the subject at hand to argue with anyone. Yet, when it comes to work-related topics where I have a certain expertise I can certainly come across as having a strong opinion and expressing it clearly.

I usually minimize time with people who want to argue but this particular person had asked repeatedly to spend an extensive period of time with me and my initial judgmental approach was, “oh, no, I can’t take this arguing”. It was time for me to shift how I feel about being opinionated. In fact, I should have done this personal work much earlier when I first noticed a desire to avoid this energy.

I used a process which I apply with my clients and also teach in my workshops: a Shadow Integration Process. For this method, another person stands in for the shadow part that is the trigger. We take note of what the initial relationship between the person and the part to be integrated is like. Usually, people report dislike, judgment, anger, fear or a feeling of disconnect from this part. We then use a meditative and intuitive process to befriend this shadow and to understand the gifts of this energy. Afterwards, the person gets to meet their now integrated part again and observe completely different feelings towards this energy. Disconnect, anger, or fear have made way for understanding, tolerance, acceptance or even friendship towards this part of us. We are able to love ourselves with this trait and are able to tolerate and accept others with it.

The second piece of work I had to do this week went deeper, as it touched a core wound that required some more healing. All of us have experienced negative or unhealthy emotional extremes at some point. When those emotions feel overwhelming, they can lodge themselves in our body-mind-energy field. They send out a continuous interfering resonance that can cause health issues but also hijack our peace of mind. We perceive our reality through our emotional pain.

With an open heart, I had made an offer to somebody about a week ago who I don’t know that well but always quite appreciated. This financial discount offer was well-thought through and even muscle tested. I felt good about being giving. I was stunned and shocked when I received a reply in which this individual indicated she felt unfairly treated by me.

When I checked in with myself later that day, I realized that in response to her feeling unfairly treated, I had flipped into the same emotion of being unappreciated and feeling this was unfair towards me. “Our emotionally driven subconscious mind has the uncanny ability of bringing people and situations into our lives that force us to face, and feel, whatever we have previously resisted, denied, or suppressed because that is what it has stored there.” (Dhebi DeWitz, The Messenger Within) My emotional interference pattern from long ago had, despite all good intentions, drawn the same emotional issue into my field.

So whose work was this to do? Mine, of course. This emotion showed up in my reality and it vibrated something much older in me, a core wound, in fact. What needed to be done was not so much to explain and make her understand my position, but to release the emotional interference pattern from within my body and field. The Emotional Release Process, often used with my clients and also taught in the Shadow Energetics Workshop, turned out to be the right tool to resolve the emotional pattern.

When we resolve the interference pattern, the vibration brought to us by the other person does not resonate anymore with our own emotions and we can let the matter go with our heart at peace. Once I had released the emotion, I was also able to see things from the other person’s view. I was able to hear the overwhelm she was experiencing and able to relate to it, free of needing to be defensive. A non-judgmental and loving communication could unfold at that point, which she responded to in kind. After all, we are usually more alike than we can see when we are lost in hurt or emotional pain.

Do you want to embrace a shadow and be less triggered by others, release an emotion you feel stuck in or learn these processes and more in a workshop? You can either contact me for an individual session or join me for this four day workshop:

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