just another 3fc blog

Well. It happened. I am finally at a normal BMI. I took so long at 152-150, I kind of thought hitting 149 or below would just be whatever. But, no, It was emotional. Overwhelming. I’m no longer overweight. It was a big goal, and I reached it.

next mini goal is to get to another decade (hello 130s!).

I am planning on skydiving when I get to goal, whatever that may be. For now, i want to get to 140 by Halloween. I really want to wear a sexy outfit (hence is why I am part of the sexy by halloween challenge on 3fc’s 20 somethings).

Halloween 2011, I squeezed my size 3x into a Size 1x/2x Gypsy costume at 275 lbs. and, i felt pretty good. Halloween 2012, I wore the same gypsy costume but I was at 220 lbs. the size 1x/2x fit a lot better and I felt like I looked awesome.

halloween 2013. Hopefully I’ll be at 140. Right now, I fit into smalls and mediums. I kind of want to be a gypsy again, but I have to buy a new outfit for it. I tried on the one from last year, and it hangs on me. I will post those pics when the time comes. I am so excited.

ughhhhhhhhh. where’s my motivation? It’s seems to be dwindling. I really want to lose more weight, and at this point I’m really unsure what I want my goal to be. Sometimes 128 looks good, sometimes 140. 135. 145. I don’t know how to choose!!! It doesn’t help that most people I know are shocked when I say I still want to lose weight. They ask me “from where are you going to lose the weight, you’re thin”. So may be that number (which is really BMI based) shouldn’t be how I base my goal. But then how? The 160s and 150s were soooo hard. I just want to see a damn 4 as the middle number. Something to get me re-motivated.

also, why can’t I comment on anyone’s page!!! It’s so frustrating. There are all these blogs I read, and I make posts, only to have an error message saying posting is temporarily disabled. this has been going on for months!!!

okay. I need to get motivated. Must get motivated. It doesn’t help that I started work and there are all these snacks here. I actually just finished like 4 tea cookies and 4 mini hersheys (probably about 400 calories). I skipped breakfast too, I just didn’t have time. Well, I guess that those damn cookies are my breakfast argh.

I am almost at goal. 149.5 would put me at a normal BMI. It’s so close. I never thought that I would get to this point. When I first started losing weight, I never thought I could go from 299 pounds to under 200. As I started to lose weight, getting to onderland seemed more and more possible. Then, when I got there, I thought “okay, I can get to 175, and then I’m done”. And I got there. These last 25 were especially hard. I felt like I’ve had to work out harder, be greater. But, I’ve done it.

Even though I told people that I was going to do this (lose weight, and lose big), deep down inside, a part of me didn’t think I could do it. When I started, I couldn’t honestly say I was going to lose 150 pounds. That number was daunting. Terrifying. Unrealistic. I basically have lost half of me. I’ve lost a person.

When is it time to call goal? 90 percent of the people I talk to tell me I should stop losing weight. They say I look great and I should be proud of my accomplishments. But, I’m not sure. I AM proud. But, I’m not sure if this is the weight my body should be at. I really want to invest in getting a body fat measurement done. I just don’t know whether or not this is my goal, if this is my happy weight. BMI-wise, I can be as low as 119. Is my body made for that? Or is it made for 130? 140? 150? I guess time will tell. But, I am happy.

This summer has been awesome. I had about 8 weeks off of work, and I spent it hiking trails, running, being active. I dated ALL summer. Got experience, went out and had a good time. I have a boyfriend, and I’m very happy with him. But, I’d be happy without him too. I’m happy with me. I put myself out there. I never thought I would be this person. And I love myself more than I ever have before.