Exactly what it says on the tin.

YSaC, Vol. 586: Deer Agony

Commercial Swing Set and Slide – $850

Commercial Swing Set and Slide : Heavy Duty
This is the Type used at Elementary Schools.
An Additional Slide is also available, and can
be purchased seperate. Additional Playground equipment
is also available
Deer is not included.
$850.00 or best offer

Boy, playground equipment sure has evolved over the years. When drmk and I were kids, you had your basic monkey bars, usually over an asphalt playground. Yes, those were the days… (and we still have the scars to prove it).

But look what we have today! All those nice soft weeds to break your fall! And a deer! I wish my playground had a deer carcass hanging from it. That would have been awes…

Great, now I gotta go get my tetanus shot. Just looking at that thing…

Comment from the other side of the aisle, as a hunter I wish I had a swingset like that for hanging carcasses. But honestly, are they so much in a hurry to get rid of it that they couldn’t wait until after butchering to take the pic?

[corey] Every swing set I have installed/removed has had the legs secured by concrete footers. Unless you are bringing your own cutting torch or tow-truck, its $50 for the swing set and $800 to get it out of the ground. [\corey]

She Who Must Be Obeyed volunteered me to help a neighbor remove one in exchange for beers and burgers afterward — demanded scotch, rib-eyes, and a signed hold-harmless; she thought I was kidding.

This is probably the earliest ever that this site has made me throw up in in my mouth a little. And it’s the original post, not a comment!

I grew up where people hunted; I know where meat comes from. Dead animal carcasses don’t, generally, freak me out. But this? It looks like the setting for a rural horror movie. Any chance the OP is from Maine? Even if not – “Paging Stephen King!”

First off, let me say I’m biased in the following because I, like many of my corn chucking friends in the midwest, hunt.

This is so lacking in class that I almost, ALMOST believe it’s a publicity stunt by an anti-hunter group to gather support for their viewpoint. I’ve seen that kind of thing before, and I’ve leared that people will go to amazing lengths to convince others that they are right.

However, this is probably just some clueless hick doing his best to screw it up for all the responsible hunters out there who try not to draw unwanted attention by flashing their carcasses at everyone.

I never hunted in Washington, though I’ve always loved venison and loved to target shoot. My mother was opposed to the idea of hunting and guns in the house, and my father didn’t really want to spend the money on the equipment. Even so, they both loved venison too and always begged a few pounds off my uncle every year.

I only started when I came over to the midwest. It wasn’t exactly peer pressure, it was more like gastronomic pressure.

Whenever I’d go over to my friend’s place he’d make something with venison. I’d invariably comment on it and he’d say, “You know, a hunting liscense only costs about $35 and I can lend you everything else you need.”

Crafty fellow. However, we’re the dorkiest hunters ever. Four of us spend all day hunting deer, and as soon as the sun goes down we pull out our D&D character sheets and game until bedtime. Which is why the following comment was made: “I didn’t see any deer this year, but my Pixie killed an orc and Joe ate it.” The equipment checklist I print up every year has “Dice” as the second listed necessity.

OMG. Taco…you brought up deer hunting in the woods and playing Dungeons and Dragons in the down time without even blinking twice! I must introduce you to some of my biker friends. You reign Geek Supreme!

As an aside, I didn’t know that *Snicker*s Bars contained meat. I learn something new every day on this site. Corey on people!

Upstate NY has a lot of hunting communities as well, though I’ve never seen a swingset used as a deer hang.
I should add that despite being vegetarian myself, I do respect hunters, provided they are hunting game, not trophies, and preferably not with machine guns and helicopters. (/liberal rant)

Wow, Lola, here in Wisconsin we mostly just hunt deer and water fowl. I imagine the experience of people hunting must be much more exciting. Do you need to purchase tags for hunting people in rural Washington? Can you go straight for the strapping young lads or do you have a ‘earn a boy’ program?

Andrea,
*snort*
Thanks for pointing out my lazy sentence construction! As I’ve never hunted for people, I don’t know the details.
*shudder*
When I was growing up, the news was full of people like Ted Bundy and the Green River Killer (who has, fortunately, since been found). Actual hunting of people in Washington state is something I’d rather not think about.
*feels ill*

Shame on you hunters killing animals for meat! You should go to the grocery store and buy the meat they make there, where no animals are harmed. (Paraphrasing a real person who commented on an article about hunting for food.)

For the record, I’m a vegetarian, largely because once I became aware of where meat came from, I decided to opt out. I have WAY more respect for hunters (because they have no illusions about how the meat got on their plate, and they still want to eat it), than for people like the aforementioned clueless commenter who go to the supercenter and buy pre-marinated, pre-cooked chik-n-chunkz(TM).

That actually was another reason I decided to at least try hunting. I felt I had to prove to myself that I could actually eat an animal, rather than just packaged meat.

And my group does all the meat processing ourselves. So not only do we see the animal, but we’re extremely aware of which muscle groups are going into which package. It’s more diluted for the hunters who take the deer to a processing shop and walk out with a couple bags of meat.

You should try raising chickens and ducks. After a few weeks of rising at the crack of dawn and walking around a cold, wet pen ankle-deep in droppings while the rooster tries to spur you (After he has woke you at the aforementioned crack of dawn. And they don’t stop when it gets light out. They just keep crowing. All. Day. Long.), you look forward to the day you can cut their stupid little heads off and rip the feathers from their bodies.

TacoMmagic – Just one tip: while giving your significant other a massage, it’s usually not a good idea to point out to them which part of their back would be tenderloin if they were a cow. Unless, like my partner, they’re a hunter and meat enthusiast.

Sarajean, remind me not to leave you alone with any of my cockatiels. 8) I once raised pullets in a 4H class (I was actually taking Small Lab Animals because I thought I could be a scientist. Then I learned there was math involved and changed my thought) and we got to ring their necks, pluck them, cut them up, and cook them. Very tasty, actually.

Ok, being from AK, we might have a couple of hunters around here. And I have with Dad and family dressed out a moose. Now that is quite the chore. Actually the moose were usually divided among friends, so we only had to dress a quarter or a half a moose.

On the other hand cutting and packaging 50 to 90 dipnet caught salmon is just as much work.

I live in an area with a lot of hunters. (I can actually hear gunshots in the woods on the weekends, which I’m hoping is hunters) Most use a sturdy tree branch for draining and cleaning a carcass or have an A-frame just for that purpose. That said, I could name a dozen or so who would look at this and think, “Dat rite dere’s ah gud ahdeer.”

Even scarier is the spit can, which disguises its contents and can fool the unwary. In college I once picked up the wrong beer can and, fortunately, did not swallow before I figured out that the gritty, slightly viscous, vaguely minty stuff in my mouth wasn’t beer. Also fortunately, the kitchen sink was close by. But I’ve known people who swallowed before they realized their mistake. Some of them hurl. Not pretty all around.
A lot of the people Iwent to college with were from metropolitan areas, but some … not so much. I believe we were socializing with the latter group when that happened.

Dad’s polite enough that he will cut the top of the can off and wrap tape around it so that you know it’s not for drinking. My Uncle Billy prefers the portability of a baby bottle. (He removes the nipple so that he can just take the cap off to spit, then put it back on and tuck it in his pocket.)

In my day, we didn’t have no namby-pamby playgrounds! We had rocks! And we threw the rocks at Jimmy Smith, who had an embolism and died and our parents punished us so hard we couldn’t sit down for a week! And that’s the way things were and we liked it that way!

…and then we buried Jimmy in the pet sematary with the undressed deer carcass and Gage and Herman Munster and then the next day they showed up looking for batteries and chewing tobacco for the Tommyknockers; we promised our parents we would never pummel Jimmy Smith with rocks again. We would get Doris Claiborne and Annie Wilkes to do it next time.

You’re leaving out the part where Doris Claiborne and Annie Wilkes were set to pummel Jimmy Smith with rocks, but a red ’57 Chevy chased the two into the school gym, where Carrie locked the doors and set the place on fire.

Where I come from, all the elementary school equipment has deer carcasses hanging from it, so this doesn’t actually seem that weird to me. That’s one of the perks of growing up in a hick town, I guess…

I’m not *that* jealous. I grew up in the deep South and didn’t have any carcasses on the playground stuff. And one of my dad’s cousins is a hunter, to boot! He loves it. He’s got mounted deer heads all around his living room. Fairly sure there’s a moose in there, too. My dad’s brother is also a hunter, but I never saw deer heads on his wall.

That was always normal for me, though, seeing the deer heads. Just about everyone in the family had them. But they never. Ever. Hung the carcasses from playground equipment. They did it *right*, with all the fancy equipment and whatever. Thank you, relatives, for not shaming me in front of the YSaC crowd. I love you all.

None on my relatives have deer heads on the walls, but Dad’s got several mounted bass. The largest has a chunk out of the tail where the cat had a nibble.
I do have an uncle who has a bearskin(with head)hanging on the basement wall. Guess who gets to sleep in the basement whenever we visit?

I am _so_ disappointed the deer doesn’t come with it. Not only do I have fond memories of swing seats shaped lke horses, I won’t be able to teach any neighborhood yardapes the song from “Sound of Music”:

“Doe, a deer, a female deer
Ray, the name I gave my gun.
Me, a guy with buckshot
Far, a long long way to run….”

Falchion, Rapiers, Cutlery, we come not to use the Tetnus Play Set but to barter it.
Ignore the venison, as it gives the Playset dishonest value.

Ack, no, no more I aver; I cannot butcher the Bard anymore than this. And guilty enou be, for e’en thinket “Out, Out, dam’ CL spot!”

Or, Look, dear Horatio, yon cerf, i knew him well. There are more things in our febrile imaginings, but only the scabby swingset, and not the noble venison. O the slings an’ arrows of Outrageous Listings, do pierce us most rudely. A Hit! a hit1, a most palbable headslap.

I remember learning so much from my experiences playing on the playset growing up: how to take turns; interacting well with others; unstructured fun is best; how to skin and disembowel a carcass. Learning not to waste…that one lesson has served me best these last 30 years.

I hate to go all corey/ on everyone, but further study of that pic makes it necessary. Unless I miss my guess, that deer has not been field dressed. (If someone can get a better close-up, please (PLEASE) do so to disprove me.)

One of the responsibilities of being a good hunter and sportsman is to properly care for your kill, and it should be done immediately otherwise the quality of the meat is compromised. I typically gut the deer on the ground (weight being an issue) and then hang it by the back legs with the rib cage propped open to cool it down (key to preserving meat quality). I’ve never hung up a deer by the neck because I feel it prevents proper draining. Also, I think it’s better by the back legs if the head is to be mounted.

I hesitate to guess the reason for the deer hanging there. Was it just killed, hung up and left? If so, those responsible need a serious lesson in humanity. I am disgusted.

Arch – elebenty hunnert for the graphic corey-ism. An observation, though, from another hunter *me waving*. This is a fresh kill, hung by the neck for skinning prior to gutting and then flipping for drainage. Although, with the size of the deer to skin it would probably take enough force to bend that awesome swing set nearly in half. We generally use a chain and a truck, to give you an idea of how much oomph you need behind such an activity.

Maybe it’s just up there as a WARNING to other deer. You know, kind of like those shrunken heads they always seemed to throw in to those old Johnny Weissmuller Tarzan movies (very subtle foreshadowing).

“DO NOT proceed any further! If the obligatory quicksand doesn’t get you, the angry natives will tie you up [apparently always very loosely] around the big burning campfire and cauldron—until Tarzan comes with the elephants and Not. A. Cheetah to rescue you. ”

I would field dress it; however, the bikini I would put on it is something I’m wearing at the local funeral parlor, where there’s a service in its memory. (BTW, does anyone know how to get deep-down mud stains off a 4×4?)

Maybe it’s just me, but my first thought on seeing the pictures was, “Wow, that playset is so much ‘fun’ that the deer committed suicide…” Actually, I think my first thought was, “Hold it, is that a DEER?” but close enough…

True Story- I once took my grandson (then about 4 or 5 years old) to a birthday party. They had a petting zoo service bring in some animals (lamb, goat, pony, chickens) for the kids to see. After an hour or so, they removed the animals, and set up a pinata. Directly. Over. The. Grass. where the animals had been… doing what animals do on the ground. When the pinata was busted open, and the kids were scrambling for the candy in the grass, (along with the barnyard candy) I casually brought to the attention of some parents what the candy was marinating in. Their looks of realization and horror were priceless. At least I think the cake and ice cream were O.K.

Given the hanging carcass prominently featured (but not included!) with the pictured set, one can only wonder what’s not included with the additional playground equipment available for “seperate” (sic) purchase. A bag of mixed body parts? A haunted graveyard that brings the dead back to life with serial killer tendencies and a vague smell of dirt? Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?

So, as part of my job (being a Landscape Architect – see link), I design playgrounds. To be honest, that’s the *best* part of my job.

While I have never before been tempted to design Dead Animal Fun into a kids’ play area, I have to say, I kind of am. “Hey, kids! It’s an outdoor classroom experience! Bring the biology class outside!”

Or, at the very least, to sneak it into a bunch of “precedent images” for a discussion at a community meeting.

As a kid, we had a set like this in the back yard – sans deer. It was involved in one of the pivotal lessons of Big Uncle John’s development. I don’t exactly know how I did it, but while I was just sitting on the swing I managed to fall off backwards, hit the ground, and knock the wind out of myself. As I lay there gasping for air, my father (known to the cousins as Giant Uncle George) walked up to me and said, “You know, son, if you’re going to be dumb, you have to be tough.”

Uhhh, I did that last winter… Even had my 6yr old help me gut it and hang it on the swingset. It was getting to 10 degrees for the week so the dinner was ‘flash frozen’ pretty quick.

You see, I was under pressure to fill my tag as we were leaving N.Idaho to go to Disneyland for Christmas week!

(bty: that was a great Christmas! No presents -really, the kids got too much crap they don’t play with after the first week; No decorations around the house, not even a tree! It was Dad’s dream come true!!)

Is anyone else wondering if that earlier YSAC-featured Viking stove is lurking adjacent, but just out of frame, to this swing set? I mean, the swingset is also rusty, it’s also old, it’s also in a field. Perhaps it, too, comes from the land of the ice and snow. Aaaaaah-aaaah-AH!

I’m trying NOT to think about what could be lurking adjacent or anywhere near that thing.
But my mind keeps playing a scene, like a dream, where I’m running toward the swing set, and as I get closer, my running slows…WTH?…Then, as I turn to run away, I’m impeded by a pair of feet…I look up to see a giant man-beast in flannel, with a shotgun resting on his shoulder…He spits into the weeds…

Funny, you should call that a nightmare. That’s one of my favorite fantasies. But, always, just as I aim the shotgun and begin squeezing the trigger, I wake up.What color is my flannel shirt in your dream?

This reminds me of what happened at my school in 4th grade. A deer ran through one of the school doors, down the hallway, and out the other door into the playground… That was highly interesting. And then at recess me and my friends went to investigate where the deer had banged against the fence hoping to get freedom. We got new doors with smaller windows after that.