“Basically, pretty much everyone doing this focus is having the ‘focus’ re-directed to directly explore their own ‘scripts’ for blocks, contained area, worries and or traumas. So, there are a number of factors related to this. The people I’ve listed in this comment have all been tracked while doing this focus and have had presented debilitations in ways to reveal these and to start dealing with them. Trent is ‘head’ focused as his feelings have been contained, his comment shows this changing, Nyssa seems to be having a lot of different traumatic ‘scary’ experiences explored / revealed, Mo fears, terrors and anxieties, Annabelle insecurities, worry of others, stress . . . I think we are ‘likely’ now entering an ‘interesting times’ phase . . . “

This comment is ‘why’ I’m putting two ‘focuses’ up on this page . . . this is because they DIRECTLY and pointedly give the simulation software the ‘biggest’ finger yet devised . . . and this is the case because . . .

This focus does a very good job of ‘targeting’ the entire simulation software, all the saved & stored data it has on yourself, including all of the AI & VR efforts focused on yourself (i.e. all Artificial Intelligence systems and particularly any using VR versions of yourself to determine how it can handicap you as much as possible) as well as all experiences defined by your script and all interactive combinations of these that define and or contribute to determining each ‘quantum’ moment of your experience as well as who you interact with AND the quality of these interactions. As such, this exercise / focus also engages with everything responsible for all negative issues impacting you to.

Focus to Identify ALL Script, Data & Software Contributions to EACH of my Moment by Moment Experiences

In other words this focus in a sense is trying to target and identify ‘EVERYTHING’ in software, and in saved and or hidden data of your own (and even others script parts) that are contributing to absolutely anything of your individual experience in attempts to identify all ‘sources’ of everything that the simulation software uses to contribute to your experience which will also help to identify all the reasoning, the logic routines and the coordinated interactive converging timelines associated with pretty much everything that defines or that determines anything that you experience.

You could describe this page as offering: “The ‘ultimate’ most advanced healing focus specifically designed to investigate and reveal absolutely everything responsible for ourselves and our experiences as entirely software defined people”.

‘IF’ you have not read it already on a previous ‘exercise’ page, then please read ALL of the open:

AND, do this before working with any ‘simulation’ experience targeting exercise: because you are ‘bound’ by certain conditions and given certain warnings with respect to this page and these exercises . . . ‘IF’ you have ALREADY read these warnings etc on another exercise page then CLICK on the accordion TAB immediately below to close it as this will save you having to scroll down the page to reach and work with the ‘exercise’!!!

“‘IF’ we are being simulated then is it possible to get direct access to the original experiences of specific enhancements that are encoded in your script?”

Well, as I’ve already done this and have then defined and refined means to do this and the answer to the above is a resounding ‘YES’.

I’ve also had specific people work with these exercises / perceptual, experience ‘focusing’ protocols that have got access to entire (and I do mean ENTIRE) scripted internal VR environments as well as very coherent access to scripted ‘functional’ experiences of various scripted enhancements and implants too.

Being able to gain access to very coherent scripted experiences is particularly the case when you are simulating someone that as part of either their job or their personal interests (eg VR games playing) had them engaging with a virtual reality network and or making use of various technological enhancements or implants pretty much ALL THE TIME.

In other words specific people here will be simulating someone that spends a substantial chunk of their REGULAR time immersed in high technology originated experiences. In some cases this is in enough detail that they can even recall their passwords enabling them to then access extremely interesting (scripted in great detail) administration VR areas including access to whatever specific VR project the person they are simulating worked on. This has allowed ourselves to directly access scripted VR experiences of specific earth simulation project software departments in fine detail.

The Simulation Software ‘Obviously’ WON’T LIKE People Accessing these Experiences

In efforts to avoid having people access these anomalous scripted experiences DIRECTLY, the simulation software relies on keeping people disengaged from everything of themselves that is ‘worrying’ from the simulation projects: objectives, ‘consensus’ reality and the ‘generic humans’ range of experiences point of view. The software basically keeps you locked into a bubble of ‘normal’ human functioning and a managed ‘consensus’ reality view point AND more importantly it relies on stopping you from even becoming aware of any ‘out of bounds’ possibilities as in ‘extra’ enhancements and or abilities (or what these experiences imply). It relies on this ‘awareness and investigation’ disengagement tactic to severely suppresses you from even becoming aware of never mind of THINKING about trying to access never mind of allowing you to actually ‘understanding’ of any scripted ‘extras’ you might have. The more any scripted experiences are anomalous compared to what is considered ‘conceptually’ and in ‘consensus reality’ terms ‘normal’ for an ‘alleged’ real human the more effort the simulation will make to keep you disengaged from them.

Unfortunately for the simulation software, if you give this tactic ‘THE BIG FINGER’ and ‘go for it’ then at least for some people they can find themselves gaining access to all sorts of things that were being kept beyond their awareness or of what they considered possible . . . I should point out that in ‘playing’ with these exercises then the software will likely tag you as ‘dangerous’ and you can expect it’ll try and find ways to distract you, make this web site and your experiences gained here fade away from your memory faster that usual while keeping you busy and occupied elsewhere . . . and so on . . . this is just it’s standard operating protocol (SOP) for worrying people. I’ve personally been giving it ‘THE BIG FINGER’ for over a decade now!!!

To make it very clear . . . despite that the worst anyone has experienced pushing against the simulation in these ways is some temporary ‘weird’ experiences that have faded out after a few minutes or hours . . .

You use/work with the below . .

Entirely at your own risk

‘IF’ you do decide to ‘go for it’ then work with the below when you have some hours to spare, so if anything ‘extra’ weird and or disturbing happens you have some time to recover / wait for it to fade out (before you have to do things like ‘drive’).

So, if you want to explore these areas then work with the ‘statement of intent’ presented below, BUT first you read the following . . . .

COPYRIGHT: The below is all Copyright, all rights reserved Clive S Hetherington 2015 and on. The exercises’, the ‘focuses’ the statements of intent (SOI) STAY on this site and you don’t copy what is below to present on another site, I have made my copyright very clear that I don’t want ENTIRE sections taken from this site and presented somewhere else. I don’t mind a paragraph or two as an ‘opener’ BUT no more than 20% (this is stated and has been stated for years in my Legal page (the link is in the very top menu way above)). This is specifically the case for this page BECAUSE I’m wanting COMMENTS of feedback from people working with this page to help myself and in fact everyone interested in what I’m presenting here to IMPROVE our understandings of WTF is going on!!!!

INSTRUCTIONS: As you read the ‘statements of intent’ then you state ‘with intention’ what you read internally with a directed will of ‘I WANT THIS / This is what I WANT!!!’ while simultaneously keeping your inner awareness / senses alert and ‘still’ to give yourself the best chance of becoming aware of anything that the focus reveals / gives you direct access too.

This ‘does’ take practice, I ‘started’ to spend time trying to become aware of my internal states and inner perceptions three and a half decades ago.

PLEASE NOTE . . .

As the main focus (part 1) is basically targeting ‘everything’ that makes up your experience, then it’s quite comprehensive in what it covers, as such, then ‘unfortunately’ it is a MONSTER, it is the longest focus ever – there is NO WAY around this . . . so, ‘yes’, to be ‘direct’, it’s a ‘pain in the arse’ to do . . . however it does (and has) given the best ‘payback’ for ourselves . . .

As this focus / exercise is SERIOUSLY attempting to target ‘everything’ that defines everything of ourselves and the quality of our interactions then the ‘RESISTANCE’ and put off’s to actually writing this focus was immense. The first people to try the first versions of this focus (Tom, Kay and Matt) ‘understandably’ had severe ‘resistance’ and put offs to actually doing it and more than the usual resistance and distractions even while doing earlier versions of this focus to.

The ‘bottom’ line is that this focus scares the living daylights out of the simulation software because of the sheer scale of what it is targeting. Basically the simulation software activates LOT’S of different ‘security’ and ‘put-off’ components, which from our perspective is an ADDED BONUS, it’s FANTASTIC because, we get to identify ALL OF THESE COMPONENTS TO . . .

‘WORKLING’ INSTRUCTIONS: Do, Part ‘1’ first (click on the purple ‘Exercise Part ‘1” ‘tab’ above) and only after you’ve done part one should you then ‘think’ about maybe doing Part ‘2’ (you can do Part ‘1’ a few times over a few days before doing Part ‘2’. To do Part ‘2’ click on the purple‘Exercise Part ‘2’ ‘tab’ above.

Remember to leave your ‘impressions’ as comments below after working with this focus.

01 – I fully and directly connect NOW to absolutely ALL sim acquired and or selected data, transformational matrices, programming templates, ANY of my own, any others or any combination of script bits and or all culture specific tech and or networks and or absolutely ANYTHING ELSE from ANY WHERE ELSE that has ever, EVER used absolutely ANY trauma, love, hate, sexuality or absolutely anything else as part of any aversion or attraction process and particularly as part of moving me towards or away from absolutely anything; any event, any circumstances, any person, any group, any ideology, any beliefs, any behaviours and or absolutely anything else and I PARTICULARLY connect to absolutely anything that ever, EVER by the use of absolutely ANY tech, network or absolutely anything else ever contributed to influencing in the slightest absolutely ANY of my moment by moment experiences EVER . . . and PARTICULARLY to absolutely ANYTHING of myself or my experience because I am reading this focus NOW . . . and or ANYTHING that I experienced in the last half an hour . . . in the last 4 hours . . . and absolutely ANYTHING I have experienced in the last day . . .

02 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single database, variable, parameter, tag, code, weighting factor and all condition, decision and or translation and or transformational matrices, programming templates, processes, trees and or absolutely any timed, data delivery schedules and or any AI or similar or absolutely ANYTHING ELSE that NOW or that has ever, EVER contributed in the SLIGHTEST to select, store and or use absolutely ANY trauma, love, hate, sexuality or absolutely ANYTHING else to define or influence absolutely ANYTHING of ANY moment experience that I have ever had or am having now . . . including absolutely anything which directly or indirectly contributed to select or define which unfolding combinations of any script parts, scripted trauma, hate, love or absolutely anything else and or data that would ever move me toward or away from absolutely ANYTHING and or directly or indirectly define and or contribute to my experience and PARTICULARLY absolutely any script parts, data or collections of data that are coded, tagged and or grouped by trauma, hate, love and or resonance and ANYTHING ELSE and or are ordered, scheduled and or categorised specifically to help achieve a specific aimed for outcome for myself (and or any others because of me) and or to directly or indirectly support absolutely ANY cultures current and or long term operational objectives, priorities and or strategic outcomes . . .

03 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single database, variable, parameter, tag, code, weighting factor and all condition, decision and or translation and or transformational matrices, programming templates, processes, trees AND to absolutely every single scripted, hidden, distributed, dispersed, AI, genius, mastermind and or subtleware or software originated or defined; manager, network, culture specific network, routine and or process and absolutely ANYTHING ELSE that has ever contributed in the slightest to analysing, assessing, appraising, categorising, storing, selecting and or delivering absolutely ANY combination of trauma, love, hate and or absolutely ANYTHING else to define and or influence absolutely ANY moment or any experience that I have ever had or am having now AND particularly of what ANYTHING of myself will move toward or away from . . . I connect NOW to absolutely ANYTHING that ever used any combination of trauma, love, hate and or absolutely any script parts, scripted resonances and or absolutely ANY other data and or to absolutely EVERYTHING that ever contributed to intermix, blend and or combine absolutely any data and or absolutely ANYTHING that contributed to absolutely ANY scheduled, timed, coordinated supply and delivery process that EVER contributed to absolutely any aspect of any experience I HAVE EVER HAD . . . AND particularly absolutely anything I have experienced because I am in this moment NOW contributing to identifying what is contributing to influencing my experience as I am reading this focus NOW . . .

04 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single scripted, hidden, distributed, dispersed, AI, genius, mastermind and or subtleware or software originated or defined; manager, network, culture specific network, routine or process and absolutely ANY combination of trauma, love, hate and or absolutely ANYTHING else using, protecting and or hiding absolutely any implant, network, system and or anything else and PARTICULARLY absolutely ANYTHING that ever directly or indirectly contributed to absolutely anything of my past, present moment and or future experience because I am investigating in this moment NOW what defines and contributes to the experience I am having now AND I particularly connect to absolutely EVERYTHING that is NOW contributing to hiding, protecting, keeping secure and or obscuring absolutely anything that directly or indirectly ever contributed to analyse, assess, define and or implement, execute, coordinate absolutely any coordinated, hidden, sand-boxed, firewalled, security, protection and or obscuration maneuvers, strategies or tactics and which has specifically activated because I am trying to IDENTIFY absolutely any maneuvers, tactics and or STRATEGIES used against what I am doing NOW . . . AND or which contributed to analyze, assess, select, define and or coordinate delivery of absolutely anything that would impact my experience of what I am doing NOW and particularly because I was asked to do this focus, decided to do it and or am working with it NOW . . . I connect to absolutely EVERYTHING that DID OR THAT COULD EVER CONTRIBUTE to sifting through, analysing, identifying, defining, scheduling and or coordinating delivery of absolutely ANYTHING that ever contributed to my EXPERIENCE before, after and or when I’d be predicted as reading this focus, paragraph and line . . .

05 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single scripted, hidden, distributed, dispersed, AI, genius, mastermind and or subtleware or software and or translation and or transformational matrices, programming templates, processes, decision trees or tables and or absolutely ANYTHING else and PARTICULARLY absolutely ANY cultures tech, network, system and or absolutely anything else that ever, EVER contributed to absolutely ANY larger scale and or coordinated efforts to influence, manage and or coordinate by absolutely ANY means absolutely ANY attitudes, actions, decisions and or outcomes of multiple people and or larger groups and particularly in efforts to influence, pre-influence and or define or pre-define when, where and how specific events or incidents will happen in the future and PARTICULARLY absolutely ANY future events involving absolutely any specific individuals and or specific pre-defined groups or collections of people or communities and or to pre-define, coordinate, instigate, manage and or influence absolutely ANY specific individuals moment by moment experiences as part of influencing absolutely any collection of individuals experiences and particularly as part of impacting absolutely any encounters, interactions, meetings and or events and particularly absolutely ANY that involved important and or defining people, incidents, accidents and or news worthy events . . . I fully and directly connect NOW to absolutely ANY data, script parts and or absolutely ANYTHING else that ever contributed to influencing absolutely any individual or collections of individuals: encounters, interactions, conversations, evaluations, decisions and or outcomes that my own or anyone else’s experience ever influenced or contributed to . . .

06 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single scripted, hidden, distributed, dispersed, AI, genius, mastermind and or subtleware or software originated or defined life and interaction definer manager, network, routine or process and PARTICULARLY absolutely ANY cultures tech, network, system and or absolutely anything else still escaping detection that ever, EVER contributed in the slightest to absolutely ANY collection of components that ever directly or indirectly contributed to absolutely ANYTHING that could ever analyse, identify, define, coordinate and choreograph specific individuals and or absolutely any combination of larger scale collection of people, communities, cultures and or nations and particularly through INDIVIDUALS EXPERIENCES AND or which ever contributed in the slightest to the selection of absolutely any data, script part and or script manipulation routine, transformational matrices, programming templates, processes and or absolutely ANYTHING else and or to absolutely ANY assessments of what to select and or of when and how to use these for absolutely any individuals experience and particularly to have absolutely ANY individual contributing to absolutely ANY larger scale or specific cultures agenda, priority, objective and or important project outcomes . . . AND I fully and absolutely connect to absolutely ANYTHING NOW which in the slightest ever contributed to masterminding, defining and or coordinating absolutely ANY larger population scale traumatic events by ever contributing to defining and applying specific experiences to specific individuals and or groups or collections of people to ensure that the longer term and or the ultimate aims, interests and objectives of absolutely ANY culture or group are achieved and or protected . . . I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely EVERY AI, genius, mastermind and or subtleware or software originated or defined; manager, network, routine or process that directly or indirectly has ever contributed to sifting through, identifying, selecting and or scheduling and or delivering absolutely ANY combination of pre-defined experiences to absolutely ANY specific individual as part of absolutely any coordinated strategy to impact and influence absolutely ANY larger groups or collections of people and particularly as part of absolutely any cultures efforts to successfully move toward and or achieve absolutely any objectives that any cultures networks, tech or system are programmed to work towards and or successfully complete and keep secure . . .

07 – I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely every single scripted, hidden, distributed, dispersed, AI, genius, mastermind and or software originated or defined; manager, routine or process and PARTICULARLY absolutely ANY culture specific tech, network, system and or anything else that was ever directly or indirectly involved in the slightest in assessing beyond the personal larger scale and long term objectives and directives when appraising, assessing and applying absolutely any gestalt of experiences to myself or absolutely ANY others . . . AND or which contributes to access, assess, analyse and or strategically use absolutely ANY population level, race, culture, society, community, social, religious and or absolutely any ‘specialist’ grouping of people level of database, data, variables, parameters and PARTICULARLY absolutely any combination of coded or grouped by tagged, resonance and or absolutely any other weighting, factor, parameters and or characteristics that directly or indirectly contribute to analyse, assess and determine what will contribute to my own or others moment by moment experience . . . AND I PARTICULARLY connect to absolutely ANYTHING that ever contributed in the slightest to defining or delivering absolutely ANY of my experiences as part of absolutely ANY cultures networks, tech or systems efforts to achieve absolutely ANY short, medium or long terms alignments, trajectories, goals, outcomes and or objectives or end points . . . I fully and absolutely connect to absolutely every AI, genius & mastermind and absolutely every script part, database, data, variable, tag, matrix, transformation table and or absolutely ANY resonance; categories, weights, parameters and factors that have ever contributed in the slightest to absolutely anything of any of this . . .

08 – I particularly track back and directly or indirectly engage with absolutely all script, software, AI’s & absolutely all stored logic and or data components of absolutely all types that are within or external to or distant from the simulation structure and or which have ever been directly or indirectly contributing to: analysing, evaluating, assessing, designing and or coordinating the delivery and or use of absolutely any components and or data and or ANYTHING ELSE that contributes to absolutely anything of myself, my life and or absolutely any of my interactions and or any limiting and or containing experiences or ANYONE ELSE’S and particularly as part of fulfilling absolutely any separate, distributed and or contributing aspects of the overall aims, objectives and or priorities of the earth simulation project . . . AND I particularly connect to absolutely ANYTHING that directly or indirectly ever contributed to locking, maintaining and or increasing absolutely anyone’s containment’s, limitations, debilitation’s and or extremes . . . .

. . . (repeat the above paragraph once more . . . )

Version 1.00 / 1.20

I fully and absolutely connect to absolutely all components, data AND absolutely EVERYTHING ELSE that I have already previously connected to while using focus 1 above in the last week . . . I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely all components involved in defining and or applying absolutely any programming template that has ever, EVER been used to influence absolutely anything of my behaviour, feelings, inclinations and or my conscious or unconscious actions or decisions . . . I re-connect NOW to absolutely everything of all of these NOW . . . . . . I connect to absolutely each and EVERY component and or coordinated combination of components including absolutely any type of AI, VR outcome testing, data, processor or super computer that ever contributed to defining and or implementing absolutely any population, sub population and or any individuals management strategies

I fully and absolutely connect to absolutely each and EVERY component and or coordinated combinations of components including absolutely any type of AI, data, data processor and or super computer that, EVER contributed in the slightest to analyse, to define and or execute absolutely any coordinated strategies and or tactics and or which ever contributed to put together, generate, distribute and or coordinate the delivery and or interactive application of absolutely any programming template and or coordinated, combination of programming templates and particularly any programming template defined for myself, my family, my friends, my community, my culture and or for absolutely any other group AND I particularly connect to absolutely every type of AI, genius, mastermind, super computer and or any type of processor and or absolutely any distributed combinations of any number of such components and particularly any that directly or indirectly refer to and or work to the agenda, aims and objectives of the simulation project and particularly to define, update, adjust and or deliver and execute any culture, group, sub-group or any individuals programming templates and or absolutely anything which defines the blend or mix of trauma, love, hate, sexuality and or animal behaviours and or instincts that have ever been pre-determined to have the desired ‘directing’ impact in alignment with the agenda, aims and objectives of the simulation project AND I particularly connect to absolutely every type of AI, genius, mastermind, super computer and or any other processor and absolutely all databases and absolutely all other types of data in absolutely any format and or absolutely any distributed, hidden and or protected combinations of these that will or have ever been used or referred to as part of constructing absolutely any individuals, any community, any culture or absolutely any ‘group’s’ programming templates and or absolutely any coordinated, timed, scheduled cascade of coordinated programming templates ever defined and or applied to ‘direct’ individuals, groups of people and or larger populations in particularly behavioural, actions and or decision making directions . . . I connect to absolutely each and EVERY component and or coordinated combination of components including absolutely any type of AI, data, processor or super computer that ever contributed to defining and or implementing absolutely any population, sub population and or individuals management strategies . . . I fully and absolutely connect NOW to absolutely all components that have ever, EVER been involved in defining and or applying absolutely any programming template that has ever, EVER been used to influence absolutely anything of my behaviour, my feelings, my desires, emotions, inner states, inclinations and or absolutely any of my conscious or unconscious actions or decisions . . .

. . . I particularly track back and directly or indirectly engage with absolutely all script, software, AI’s & absolutely all stored logic and or data components of absolutely all types that are within or external to or distant from the simulation structure and or which have ever been directly or indirectly contributing to: analysing, evaluating, assessing, designing and or coordinating the delivery and or use of absolutely any components and or data and or ANYTHING ELSE that contributes to absolutely anything of myself, my life and or absolutely any of my interactions and or any limiting and or containing experiences or ANYONE ELSE’S and particularly as part of fulfilling absolutely any separate, distributed and or contributing aspects of the overall aims, objectives and or priorities of the earth simulation project . . . AND I particularly connect to absolutely ANYTHING that directly or indirectly ever contributed to locking, maintaining and or increasing absolutely anyone’s containment’s, limitations, debilitation’s and or extremes . . . .

. . . (repeat the above paragraph once more . . . )

AND . . . of course if you DO experience ANYTHING while using the above then you give us a comprehensive description as a comment below . . .

For soul-healer.com site accessing, reading distraction effects and so on then use the following (read / carry out 2/3 repetitions of what is below) . . .

“I fully and absolutely, completely connect NOW to absolutely ALL combinations of data, script and or sim components that are directly or indirectly in the slightest contributing to or are responsible for myself having absolutely any problems, distractions, diversions, blocks, sabotages and or absolutely any other type of ‘put off’s’ to finding, coming to, accessing, easily reading and or understanding absolutely any page on this site and or which is contributing to or responsible for causing me to have absolutely ANY difficulties, easily SEEING, easily reading, easily taking in, understanding, integrating, recalling and or easily discussing and or accurately conveying to absolutely any others absolutely any simulation information I encounter on this site . . . ”

95 Comments

moJanuary 15, 2016 @ 8:35 am

Reading this pre-exercise seemed much easier and felt better than the previous exercise page.

01: being spun in a chair, covered in bandages, this is a dummy of me, they are holding remote control that impulses the dummy which indirectly/subtly/somehow influences me.. It impulses me to feel crappy by various means and to seek whatever methods to make me feel better.. They remote control the tortured dummy to make me sabotage myself especially when I am about to have a positive action or action without sim in my life.

2nd time: I see that a different type of remote control or system is connected to my actual body, creating electrical impulses that amplify any traumatic memory recall or fear, almost attempting to stress me out, to distract me from figuring out WTF is going on here.

~~~ High pitched ringing in head~~~~~~~

02: I see clones of myself spinning almost on a factory conveyor belt looks like I am being transferred to be suspended in liquid goo? Lab notes are being taken by bug looking humans?

..quick images pass of me sometime in the past getting my head stamped like a barcode, then energetic downloads synch with the barcode into my body to translate into my programming, and heavily influenced everything that I do like an instruction set.

I see hanging bodies, as almost data bodies, these circulate in every direction to land in appropriate timing to most every human on Earth, these influence persons behavior in a dramatic way to make then have a new identity, or a swift life change, almost like a ”stay on track” data package designed ”special” for each individual, keeping them apart of the simulation,, It is very clear that no one has much choice in what to do in regards to big decisions that they make, a lot of it is just from these data bodies… There was a person overseeing this with clipboard and white coat, his face was a black hole, like vacuum.

I see myself currently being stuck inside a glass room, glass was removed.

03: I see how many ”resonances” are created in my life to further traumatize me, I see how the sim/ai/etc provokes me to feel deep love and connection with something, then once I am apart of it, they will twist it around in the way most likely to fuck with me the most (which is often not directly seen) (most people are fucked with not in dramatic ways but in ways that will be subtle, actually giving someone what they want in some ways, is the best way to fuck with them)… quit freaky to think that even the things I really love, are just things I may be simulating to love for underlying sick reason that the sim wants.

I find a key in a drawer, I swim somewhere to find a lock that matched it, I unlock it, connect to a bright ball of wires, they are rearranged and then this comes to me.

I see myself get electrocuted on the arm, then almost sexually raped by a form of metal type of energy… Electrodes to some body of mine, directly on the head.

04: I read 04 a few times and nothing goes through, I read the rest of the exercise and feel unable to do any of it, as if it was just like every word was immediately erased from my memory not making anything seem like a complete sentence.. even after reading focus exercise a few times. I am feeling there is enough integration time needed just for what the first 3 sections brought up, so I will wait until next time.

“Reading this pre-exercise seemed much easier and felt better than the previous exercise page.”

This ‘exercise’ has been well used and well updated for over two months now so, pretty much all ‘sim’ security / reactions to it will have been detected and counteracted / dealt with.

“they are holding remote control that impulses the dummy which indirectly/subtly/somehow influences me”

This is the what the AI’s do with VR versions of ourselves within the sim software, this is the approach used to ‘pre-find’ the best ‘shit’ to apply to ourselves to impact us with respect to our current circumstances as well as predicted (about to happen in the future) circumstances. What you describe is ‘likely’ the scripted experience of the person you are simulating interfaced to an uploaded version of yourself in a ‘test’ process of this AI / VR setup to make sure its all working correctly.

The rest you describe above also fits with different angles of ‘testing’ the f*** people up ‘shit’ delivery system.

04 . . . haha . . . based on you’re very good descriptions of what the ‘sim’ software actually does then it seems to me that you’ve caused emergency security routines to activate due to you getting access to this level of detail. Wait a few hours / 24 hours (enough time for these new routines to be found and deleted) before trying it again and see if you get through 04!!!

First time: By the third paragraph, I connected to major events, trauma, and significant interactions represented by dots in a single timeline. The dots were scrambled, mixed up to create entirely different events and interactions that felt out of context at the time.

The sixth and seventh paragraphs connected me to simulation AI’s engineering a typhoon that destroys different communities yet keeping most simulated residents alive to increase their trauma (such as keeping them impoverished, not receiving adequate long-term help from a corrupt government, and making their well-off neighbors experience donor fatigue).

Doing Part 1 the second time didn’t have much effect except for reconnecting to my unresolved issues related to joblessness and the resulting depression.

Exercise part one was almost doable. did drift off for a while and at the last bit strange stuff started messing with me causing me to blank out. also the high pitched beeping it was driving me crazy. There was something i could not figure out i got to see an i dont know how to discribe it exactly a screen or something to log in but i think i messed up the password. Punishment was pretty severe no sleep last night and some very pissed visitors in my room next to my bed who went not a very friendly lot. shouted that they needed to get the hell out some bull about ascension told them to ef off leave me then their was a whole scene about how i was getting my family into trouble that they would hurt them for my improper behaviour told them to be my guest was not impressed. tried the second excercise got nothing will try tomorrow again after i got some proper sleep

2 – A computer scanned my timeline and went through all of my scripted data. Then it selected and applied certain trauma to manage my interactions with significant people in my life in a negative way.

4 – I felt how the gradual accumulation of trauma resulted in my tendency to avoid any scenario that might potentially re-activate traumatic life areas until I withdraw from everyone.

5 – I had a glimpse of the same-old-same-old future: a never-ending cycle of events and gatherings I feel obliged to attend – and having to deal with people whom the simulation software will definitely use to harass me, especially if I dare talk about anything from the Soul Healer website or worse, reveal my involvement in it.

6 – I saw a central black box connecting to smaller black boxes, which in turn connected to various unidentified components until they connected to significant people (most likely leaders) and to the groups under them (most likely the leaders’ respective communities or countries). The entire black box network is connected to other similar black box networks. An ultimate black box links those networks together and controls the significant people, whose actions impact everyone around them. The structure reminded me of the local, regional, national, and global government systems and how each level affects individuals negatively.

Doing Part 2 resulted in nothing but blocks from accessing certain components I feel I should have access to.

————— Reading some of the latest comments about the horrific going-ons inside the earth simulation project triggered fear, worry, and pain over losing some “disappeared” colleagues, but I felt all those feelings were immediately shut or numbed down. Also, simulation-induced memory fade kept me from remembering the comments I had just read.

In general – the feedback was very personnel and not a lot of visuals. At times I felt resistance to revealing all that came to me for privacy purposes.

01 – This exercise was very easy to get into and I did not feel intimidated at all. I was very excited to get started despite some detox symptoms from the previous exercise. I felt very happy starting the exercises – like I was going home. I instantly felt surrounded by a circle of translucent subtle beings that “seemed to out for my best interest and would protect me”. ( I hope I was correct) I then had a strong feeling of release and felt lighter.

“love” – connected to a carrot in front of a horse cart – every time I pursued a good relationship the carrot would be snagged away and I would end up in another area, unhappy, and not in charge of my life. I became very stoic as a coping mechanism. I am broken about the unusual amount of family / children I have witness dying due to unexplained reasons. I am getting light headed and ache in my abdomen.

My feelings seem to have been dampened down so I don’t feel the pain in this life. Everything is blah and I don’t feel alive. I do not feel a sincere level of respect. Conversations with friends and family seem to be for transfer of information only and no feelings involved.

02 – I find myself fidgeting and wiggling my legs, become anxious and excited like a little kid in a candy store. “AI” – strong memories of beings (many from dimensions of shapes I did not recognize) in my room at night trying to molest me. This has been going on for decades. I connect to the New Age explanation of this as departed lovers coming back to visit. Odd that they would write about this. I also connect to a huge component of molesting of all people as a method to control them. Some of this was computerized / mechanical molesting. I feel like anyone trying to do this type of harm should not exist and I tried to pretend they did not exist.

03 – A headache has started and ear pressure is increasing. I then connect to a flashback of my entire life with very realistic visuals of people and relationships and real feelings involved that have long been suppressed. I then transition to current scripted experiences where I live in a shock treatment “cause and effect” life. There are constant surprises at the last minute and the rug is pulled out as soon as things start to go well. The sneak attacks continue even if I am trying to help others, and I am blind sighted and ambushed and spend too much time being on guard.

04 – I connect to what must be years of manipulated dreams of my beloved family members beating and torturing me. This would have altered my opinion of them over the years when it was most likely not true…………….I have fluid building up in the back of my throat and significant weakness and wobbly hands as I try to write notes. My fingers are going weak and I am crying, so much sadness………………… “Execute” – I stop and look at this word a long time “Sand box” – I continue to read this as “salt box” I cannot get away from this and later look it up as a common method of torture – had no idea “Firewalled’ – visuals of a firing squad “Security / protection” – I don’t understand these words ——————-feeling stuck and I start to deep breathe to push myself thru………….. “Anything that contributed to my experience before this focus” – I actually had a great day

05 – The words are reading very easily and flying off the page into my brain, but not a lot of meaningful feedback. “Any larger scale or coordinated effort to influence” – of course – this is going on all over. Everything seems to be falling apart and I keep trying to plug the dam leak with my finger. The population is indeed feeble minded and sheeple and fried. They are not trying, dumbed down and distracted. People need to read this information and wake up. My heart is now racing and I am light headed in a good way.

06 – “Still escaping detection” – I have a visual of pipes with data bits flowing thru them. The data bits connect to objectives of certain cultures and the ongoing manipulation in society. …..getting some significant neck pain….. I get some strong distractions that this website is nonsense and run by an alphabet agency.

07 – This is exceptionally well written. I read it many times but do not connect to anything at this time. My ears are throbbing, but appear to be opening up and I can / am allowed to hear unusual background noise I never heard before.

Well, Annabelle, this still shows that soul-healer.com readers working with these latest exercises are in an orientation to identify ‘shit’ events and accumulations . . . which is a pre-requisite to identifying these as ‘data’ and deleting them . . . the ‘sim’ has us having many ‘physical’ lives re-living many of the ‘difficult’ scripted parts over and over again as part of the accumulate ‘trauma / anxiety / stress / worry etc . . . . ‘ such that compared to the ‘shit’ encoded into the original script we have on average accumulated about 200 times more ‘shit’ (i.e. it’s been designed to accumulate way more ‘shit’ variations which can be used to more ‘finely’ manage ourselves) . . .

Implants that manipulate sexual orientation, that are made to fuck with peoples relationship to make the sim place people with those it finds most suiting.

I see myself stuck inside bondage like a mummy, I am set free, another scene of me that is cuffed to a chair, set free.

I see a lab scientist try to turn me into a psycho dog, by giving me powdered chemical.

I start to feel this very strong motivation, to take down the sim, to find strategies to eradicate it and get out of here.

05 – There are young girls, having their heads filled up with various programs, they are being made as copies of other young children that are about to be killed, these cloned girls will replace them, the others are eaten alive as they are not following SOP.

06 – I see how the sim breaks possible positive relationships apart, this happened today with me, I didn’t notice this as much then, but now I see how the sim was influencing this women with suggestions to think I am a person to stay away from, dangerous etc.

07 – I see someone drawing a blueprint for my town, influencing the people here and what we do through a positive feedback loop, ultimately wanting much of the population to be apart of the new age with oneness peace etc.. I see another person competing with this person to influence this town, he would like to create chaos confusion, division. When trying to feel more into these people they push me out.

PART 2 Core: I am in a room with a switch board, tabs turning on/off millions of them, a versions of me turning them on and off rapidly, as if i am programmed to know which ones to flip. They regulate everything that a person can think or feel, this is mine. Attempts are made to take this over, or remove it. I am kicking down some sort of large super computer, after a while, robot people find me then electrocute me with a white metal rod to then stop me.

~~~~ Part of this almost seems like a drill like somehow in the original population I was convinced to be a guinea pig or a person that tests what happens to everyone when they get out of line, or when they are disobedient to the sim and its agenda and AI protocols.. So in this way, I am sometimes simulating a person that tested the programs of ‘ways we respond to people who do not follow SOP’.. Perhaps I am way off about this, but if this is true– what a shitty person to simulate!

I am still having strong reactions to this exercise feeling like my head is compressing, and data tries to penetrate my whole body to stop this,,,, Feel like I am at a breaking point with all of this shit.

Hi Mo, well, that’s the problem with simulating someone that was a ‘tester’ for the EAAS project and testing things that just don’t ‘fit’ in the slightest with the public spun ‘therapy’ plan in that it’s virtually impossible for you start to question what it’s ‘really’ about or even as you write above:

“I start to feel this very strong motivation, to take down the sim, to find strategies to eradicate it and get out of here.”

This is ‘likely’ what the person you are simulating thought while WORKING on the project. I know that ‘lots’ of people working on the project because suspicious enough that they ‘disappeared’. I don’t want to go into the ‘disappeared’ in any detail here BUT I’d just say that ‘disappearing’ the physical body doesn’t disappear the subtle / ‘real’ body.

So, you’re getting some very detailed information here with regards the persons you are simulating’s involvement in this project and it’s suspicious AND the above is also touching on traumas and other issues / debilitations . . . which hopefully will start to ease up / change soon . . .

2 – A white pawn (representing my [simulated] self) was in the center of a vortex consisting of chess pieces and colored board game pieces (representing the [simulated] people around me). The hands manipulating the chess pieces were too quick and confusing for me to follow. Then the white pawn was substituted with a red pawn, as if to mark it as “different” or “dangerous.”

3 – The pawn’s color changed back to white. The moment it entered the vortex of entangled interactions, it spun round and round until it was thrown outside. It thought it was safe, only to see the vortex approaching and realizing it had been trapped in the corner of a wooden board game. Its only choice is to re-enter the vortex or remain stuck.

4 – In one instance, the white pawn jumped off the corner of the board game, only to find itself in a table where the only options available were other board games (probably representing worlds/countries) with predetermined sets of rules and ways of living. All the board games were contained in a room (probably representing the earth simulation) the pawn cannot get out of. It felt its life were at the mercy of the hands that maneuver its movements whether it likes it or not.

5 – Upon reading the phrase “pre-define when, where and how specific events or incidents will happen in the future,” I was presented with a board game consisting of dice and counter pieces (representing players). The pieces moved around the board according to the number that appears on the dice and eventually landed on squares within the board. A positive event square allowed the pieces to move forward, while a negative one set back the pieces a few squares or sent them back to square one. Then I was presented with a deck of cards that enabled players to take actions that benefit themselves or exploit others to advance further in the so-called “game of life.” (I’ve personally never played the board game called “Life,” but I remember someone saying that life is a game.)

The game included the possibility of players being completely eliminated when their resources are completely used up and cannot advance any further either due to bad luck or being outmaneuvered by opponents.

6 – I was presented with a war diorama, which was used to plan attacks against opponents to win the war and become the dominant culture, religion, and ideology. Specific roles were assigned to the kings, generals, colonels, lieutenants, soldiers, etc. of the opposing sides. Civilian pieces were included in the diorama as hostages, prisoners to be released, and/or possible converts to the new religion.

The above image reminded me of past group meetings where an internal VR board with multicolored dots and interconnected crisscross lines appeared in my mind while observing how individuals behaved in group settings. I felt that my original form used the input from its observations of group dynamics to replicate the interactions of the group’s simulated counterparts.

7 – The phrase “long term objectives and directives” made me think of world conquest to obliterate ASQ cultures, subjugate entire populations, and create empires. I felt sad over the unnecessary trauma and suffering caused by those engineered wars.

I remembered Clive saying that World Wars I and II did not happen in the original environment. Then I felt the shock of simulated earth residents who experienced traumatic events that did not happen in their original scripts, as well as the trauma of people who probably did not engage in warfare originally but whose simulated counterparts did so in the earth simulation. Perhaps this explained why some people or countries remain in denial about the atrocities they committed during the world wars.

Part 2

The word “programming template” reminded me of the life template society expected me to follow: study, find work (or help in the family business), get married, have kids, retire, and die (likely from illness). I felt that those who chose to defy that life template were likely to be singled out as odd and either be given hell or deliberately f**ked up (i.e. unwanted pregnancies, terminal illness, poverty, etc.) so they would be forced to follow the standard life template.

“A white pawn (representing my [simulated] self) was in the center of a vortex consisting of chess pieces and colored board game pieces (representing the [simulated] people around me). The hands manipulating the chess pieces were too quick and confusing for me to follow. Then the white pawn was substituted with a red pawn, as if to mark it as “different” or “dangerous.”

Most of the time I’ve no idea as to what you are writing relates to in a basic sense. Your ‘writing / descriptions’ are always extremely cryptic / incomprehensible . . . i.e. you don’t ‘clearly’ separate out / identify what is your actually experience while you are doing an exercise, from ‘imaginings’, or of what is just idol speculation about what you personally ‘think’ ‘something’ means or what ‘something’ reminds you of or has some associative ‘meaning’ personal to yourself.

For example:

“(representing my [simulated] self)” – A question mark ‘?’ after simulated? and or self? would make this definitively into ‘speculation’. Unfortunately, you don’t actually state ‘what is what’ i.e. you don’t separate out ‘what’ actually happened / what you ‘actually’ perceived from what are your ideas or interpretations or associations of what you perceive.

“The hands manipulating the chess pieces” – Which ‘hands’, there is no description of ‘hands’ previous to this, they’ve just been magically inserted in the paragraph with no context. In other words you’re exceptionally good at completely missing out ‘detail’ while also adding in undisclosed speculation that you fail to identify as such.

You never say: I ‘think’ this means or I ‘feel’ that xyz relates to abc. Bottom line, just don’t give me any speculation or ‘extras’ AT ALL – I just want what YOU actually get / perceive directly in detail I don’t want anything about what you ‘THINK’ something is (which you often don’t actually define as something you are ‘thinking’ either), and I don’t want you telling me what this reminds you of ‘as something’ either, as these and ‘other’ vague and diversionary ramblings that are added into your comments aren’t useful / helpful either, rather they are a complete distraction. I also don’t understand why you often add into a comment where you are when you do the focus either!!!

From now on, I don’t want any speculation about anything from you because a) you’re invariably wrong and b) in you not actually specifying ‘what is what’ in your comments it makes them pretty much impossible to interpret and as such every comment you leave here wastes time I could better spend on other things. Bbasically, Nina, pretty much every comment you write here is a distraction, a diversion, a ‘diffusion’ away from what we are exploring here AND from what others write in comments that are all way more ‘coherent’ and straight forward in basic ‘writing’ terms.

01– I am a queen sitting on a throne with a crown that has jewels that light up in different colors based on decisions that have to be made to control my “population”. I feel bad about being this queen. This feels like nonsense but I am not sure.

02– Against a pitch-black background, I meet a miner in a miner’s hat. The light on his hat is turned on and is shining in my face. He is in front of a 10 ft. diameter sewer pipe / tunnel lying on the ground. Behind the miner guy are 8-10 jellybean bots. They are encouraging me to go into the sewer pipe and walk to the other end. I can see inside the pipe and at the end of the tunnel I see a city. I am very skeptical about this guy and wait to see what happens. He says, ”Ok – we will go first”. They walk into the tunnel and when they get about half way thru, a zipper appears on top of the tunnel. The whole tunnel unzips and everything unfolds into a fairy tale landscape with castles and beautiful flowers and trees. I instantly think this is more nonsense and am disappointed. The fairy tail scene fades away quickly into an apocalyptic end of the world scene. I quickly switch to the inside of a primitive hospital ward with 20-30 dirty metal hospital beds full of mangled and injured humans. The humans appear to be dead or near death. They are quiet and do not move or make any noise. A conveyor belt is rolling and goes into a furnace full of fire. Two guys in white labs coats start to snatch humans off the hospital cots and put them on the conveyer belts that go into the fire. As each human is put on the conveyor belt – the human body morphs into a mummy or cocoon. I wonder what is going on. The conveyor belt workers telepathically respond, “ We have to start over”. Behind the conveyor belt, 4 metal file cabinets appear. The jelly bean bots are back and they start to pull all of the files out of the file cabinets and put them on the conveyor belt going into the fire. I ask “don’t you want to save those files?” The conveyor belt guy responds, “ We just do what we are told.”

03– “Network” – I connect to an air traffic control / command center type area with many computer screens. This seems / feels like a legitimate working command center as part of the project. The room is very dark. The computer screens are lit with outlines of all of the continents on earth. Each continent has thousands on white dots lit up. “Intermix / blend / combine data” – I feel like I am inside another area of this commend center and it appears to be a Genetics lab. There are many scientists working to coordinate the birth of children to correct parents.

04– “Protecting or hiding implants” – I am in a meadow woodland setting full of trees and many wildflowers. The wind is blowing and a huge amount of pollen can be seen drifting thru the air. Then, very quickly I am back at the command center in what appears to be a different lab for Botany and Biology. Scientists are there with alot of plants and are looking under microscopes. One looks up at me and says” Don’t worry we can make them airborne”.

05– “Transformation matrices” – I see thousands of small circuit boards floating in the air and blowing all over the earth. A large “Ear” appears. I can see people the ground and the ear seems to be talking to me. It implies the people transmit data out of their bodies, and towers or telephone poles pick this up and send this back to the command center. The command center then analyzes this data and zaps signals back thru the towers to the people on the ground. This is an on going feedback loop. This makes sense to me but I wonder “how did you do this in primitive times before the technology of telephone poles?” Some guy at the command center looks up and says, “don’t worry – we have a way to hide the transmitters and receiving towers”.

“I am a queen sitting on a throne with a crown” – this nicely represents you engaging with one of the AI’s that is tracking / analysing / managing a specific sub-population.

“The fairy tail scene fades away quickly into an apocalyptic end of the world scene.” – ‘nature / fairy tales’ represent being an immortal subtle form without resource needs living in the subtle environment which is what we start out as in the sim 12000+ years back (at the start of each sim cycle) with the end point taking us all into the ‘apocalyptic end of the world’ – so this is ‘phrase’ sums up out entire unfolding ‘story / history’ here.

“A conveyor belt is rolling and goes into a furnace full of fire” – is an apt description of the ‘fires of hell’ which in ‘C’ terms = the apocalyptic end.

“they start to pull all of the files out of the file cabinets and put them on the conveyor belt going into the fire” – represents the sim management / keep what the sim is doing hidden and particularly with respect to what is applied to each person (now being revealed in lots of recent comments here).

“I connect to an air traffic control / command centre type area with many computer screens.” – good description of the sim software AI / VR components coordinating managing everything / many different groups and the individuals in these groups even down to who gets born to whom!!!

“It implies the people transmit data out of their bodies, and towers or telephone poles pick this up and send this back to the command centre.” – yea, the entire system has to keep track of each person and check that they are doing / following their pre-defined ‘role’ within the larger picture. So there are ‘subtle’ wireless networks passing information from people back up the ‘management’ chain.

06 – “interaction definer manager” – I am watching a DJ playing records on his sound system. He has a huge stack of records and starts to play them one by one. Some records play for only a few seconds, some longer than others, and some all the way. If the DJ does not like the way a certain record sounds, he abruptly pulls the record off of the record player and throws it into a trash pile.

“Larger scale collection of people” – There is a huge water tower in front of me with many small pipes dumping into small houses. Numerous space ships land on top of the water tower and go inside of it and make adjustments and then leave. This seemed a bit odd??

“Assessment of what to select” – I am watching many pendulum clocks floating in the air. The clocks have mechanical wheels / gears that rotate inside them. The teeth on the gears are connected to tubes that contain white Ping-Pong balls. When the gear reaches the normal chime position, a specified amount of Ping-Pong balls come flying out and drop down to the earth.

“Masterminding” – I am watching a huge anthill on the ground with millions of ants scurrying around. Very quickly I move inside the anthill and the ants are now human size bug type people. There is an entire city full of ant people running business, stores and families. I can see thru a porthole to the outside of the anthill, and there is a man with binoculars looking inside watching / studying how the ant colony operates.

“Successfully keep secure” – Many jellybean bots are rampaging thru peoples’ houses and randomly pulling out items they think are valuable. These items are all put in treasure chests decorated with jewels.

07 – “moment by moment experience” – I am in an automated factory that is bottling soda into glass bottles. The glass bottles flow on the assembly line and are filled with brown liquid, get capped, and then get a label put on them. Each label has a human face on it. 2 workers in white lab coats run the assembly line. The workers are positioned at the end of the line and have a quality control role where they are most concerned with the level of fluid in each bottle. They don’t seem to care if the labels are crooked or the caps are defective. Bottles that pass QC are individually picked off the line and put into crates. Once in a while a certain bottle will randomly be pulled off and put in a crate marked “special”. Bottles that have incorrect fluid levels are allowed to fall off the end of the production line and crash onto the floor. The 2nd worker then sweeps up all of the crashed bottles and takes everything; glass, soda and even garbage back to the beginning of the assembly line and dump it all into the hopper with new bottles.

“Cultures and networks” – I am now inside an old fashioned pub. One side of the pub has a bar with patrons sitting and drinking and eating. The other side has a drab gray background and contains a dart board game in the corner. There is a long line of dignitaries and VIP’s that have come to play darts. I will call them VIP’s going forward. The VIP’s come from all over the world and are men and women from all different cultures. They are all dressed in very nice clothes related to their cultures. The dartboard looks like a red and white swirled lollipop and is round. The round dartboard has a dynamic diameter that fluctuates between 2-4 ft. in diameter, and it rotates clockwise.

3 men in gray lab coats are running the game. There are 2 plastic tubs full of 8 “ long darts at the front of the line of VIP’s. The attendants in gray lab coats hand each VIP between 1-3 darts. As soon as a VIP grabs a dart, a human face appears on the head of the dart. The VIP throws the darts at the swirling board and then walks to the back of the line. The next VIP gets handed 1-3 darts and this goes on and on. There is another attendant near the dartboard that regularly stops the twirling board, pulls out the darts, and wipes each one off with a rag and some solution. He then puts the cleaned darts into a tub to be taken back to the front of the line of VIP’s. As I look thru the windows to the outside, I see the day change from daylight to night and back to daylight many times. The VIP’s playing darts are excited about the game, but remain very orderly. There does not seem to be any score keeping or prize to be had. I see no end in sight for this dart game. The patrons in the pub are not aware of the dart game and the VIP’s are not aware of the patrons having a good time in the pub.

I did this exercise Friday and have been feeling a lot of resistance (and having a lot of delays) to posting my notes from that session, Clive. I almost didn’t post / almost chose to severely edit these notes, but today I feel defiance of attempts to control / influence me, so am posting and will let you decide if you want to approve this or not.

This first attempt at this exercise and composing this summary took me over 6 hours – I lost track after that – plus the hours spent contemplating what to do about it. Should I have edited it down more?

As you’ll see in my notes below, I felt like some ‘version’ of me was talking to me, giving me guidance, which at the time felt like a huge relief. But something didn’t sit right, so I spent time over the weekend sitting with my discomfort, and began to feel myself being ‘used’ to further the aims of what likely is what many people may call my “Higher Self”.

For a while now, my life has felt like I’ve had a ‘firm hand’ upon me – like how some people feel ‘guided by the hand of god’. But for me, it’s felt more like the 1980’s version of the movie, The Clash of the Titans, where the gods pick up the figurines of men and place them at will here or there upon the earth, maneuvering mankind around as pawns to play out the gods’ own sordid twisted dramas.

As the weekend progressed and I wrestled with the inner conflict, I began to sense that the person I am simulating is also being manipulated. Manipulation upon manipulation, all of the versions of “me” being given “just enough” of the facts to motivate a person to act one way or the other, like how Anakin was manipulated by Palpatine to turn to the Dark Side by convincing him it was the only way to “save” Padme, when in actuality, Anakin’s conversion to Darth Vader is what killed Padme.

I feel very used, manipulated and abused right now, and thus feel very wary about everything I’m experiencing, including the results of this exercise. I am also now feeling like I want to hack my original form, find out what’s manipulating her; that thought and also my determination to post this comment, is causing an unpleasant reaction inside me right now.

Disturbingly, I am also feeling a sense of “fealty” to my “higher self / original form”, which feels forced upon me. Like I’m being “forced” to serve the whims of my higher self/original form, and/or whatever is controlling/manipulating it.

—–

First time

01 – My back feels weird, ears have a whine in them, feel chills on my back, similar to my experience with VR Experiences Exercise 1

any group: I now relax yet feel sharp pains in my back. The energy in my chest is now more broad and finer vibration, yet still rather rough. It’s not unpleasant though. Feels like determination or anger perhaps.

I feel like I have comrades or companions. Like a “band of brothers” – a group with whom I belong yet it’s not about “feel-good” companionship .. I sense the “tone” of the group is determination and anger and resoluteness. (Note: I’m personally in a difficult time right now that feels very isolated, misunderstood, with no recourse, betrayed; this makes me feel like I have a team backing me up, somewhere, somehow.)

any ideology: I make a strong inner connections to feelings of “being against status quo”

any beliefs: I feel like someone is talking to me, about what’s going on, about being against status quo, about my current situation in life: “Abandon all you believe to be true; forge ahead to the unknown; the truth is not what nor where you think it is; keep looking. We will guide you by your experiences. You will know what is true because you will see it, live it, know it with your own lived-through experiences. Trust not your senses nor your mind. ‘Know’ inside, deep in your core. No one will believe you. No one will understand you. You will be maligned and mistrusted; you will be outcast and despairing. You will see the world for what it “is” and will be the only one, yet not alone, for we are with you. Remote. Far away. Resonating truth to you, in a world that has none. Nothing is as it seems, Nyssa. No one understands, not you. Not Clive. Not the others.”

I begin to cry, releasing pent up loneliness and grief. It’s so hard. So lonely. I feel like my “backup team” is very very far away, many many realities and layers and dimensions removed from here.

At the word ‘core’, I pause and feel inwards, inwards, and begin to sense layers and layers of life, radiating out from me, like I’m surrounded in all directions by concentric layers of resonances and life and consciousnesses and densities and realities and all of those words are wrong but I cannot think of how to describe it. It felt like a sense of connecting to all the dimensions of my Self.

any tech: my throat feels full again and my head tilts up and I gag like something is in my throat. Like I’m trying to expel something stuck in my throat. It’s similar to the sensation I experienced in the VR-1 exercise.

last half an hour: I’m directed back to my core like before, and still feel the layers, yet this time I feel the layers have a finite “end” to them, like I’m inside a bubble, whereas before, they stretched out on and on.

last four hours / last day: I hear and feel the internal screaming and erratic quivering of my energy body, similar to what I’ve been experiencing on and off today.

I almost stop here. It’s been an hour and a half already. I’m worn out and distractions abound. But I choose to continue. The choice feels symbolic. When I choose to continue, the distractions stop, and I regain energy.

03 – Delivery process: As I spend time feeling my body and my energy body, I begin to become aware that something is moving. I trace rhythmic energy movements that remind me of data packets that flow from the back of my head, down my neck, some seem to go down further while others have a shorter route to return up and exit my mouth. As I relax and let the experience flow, I notice my mouth emits little “puffs” as the ‘data packet’ exits. Back of head – packet travels down/up via varying routes – I feel a bubble form in the mouth – I emit a “puff”. Some packets feel like they go down and stay down, however.

Then I notice my ears sometimes hurt with a high pitched inner sound – possibly my subtle hearing? It hurts and pinches, and when I feel it, my mouth then opens and I emit a silent “bray” like a donkey. It feels stressed and like a cry of pain. The pain feels deliberate to make me emit a ‘tortured data packet’?

In the final phrase of this section, I find myself going through what feels like a progressive re-enactment of being debilitated:

My heart is warm and I feel like I am doing this for the person I care about.. I feel peaceful. Content, almost happy. But then the feeling fades and my solar plexus begins to feel deeply pained and weak and nauseous, I feel pains and shards in my chest, feels like I’ve made a horrible choice, I begin to crumple and feel grief and despair as my body hunches over and slumps, weakened and destroyed. Overwhelming despair, and my body is wracked with pains; I open my mouth in the same “silent donkey bray” as described previously, but this one is long and sustained. A wail of silent grief that goes on and on.

I sense “disrupt sabotage delay destruct, chaos” but don’t know the context for them, although they feel like strategies being added to my life. (personal note: most things in my life feel like they get sabotaged or blocked, like I’m under constant attack by life itself to contain me)

My heart is pounding. Another ‘puff’ and I think: “I won’t be contained. (puff) I won’t be detained (puff) No one can know (puff)” .. it feels like each ‘puff’ is somehow related to each of my thoughts, like I’m creating a data packet myself?

Next I think: “He can’t get away with that. I’ll show him. I’ll write my own script.” and feel inner screaming.

06 – INDIVIDUALS EXPERIENCES: My throat is full again and head tilts back and I gag like I’m trying to expel something: “Get this out of here. I don’t want to do it like this. I’ll do it my own way. I won’t have a script. Free choice. Free will. Figure it out as I go along. Not worth it. ”

important project outcomes: Head is screaming and pain pressure in forehead. Eyes feel like I’m reading or watching something. I think: doing it my way, not like him. His way sucks. It’s stupid. Scripts. Bullshit. That’s no way to simulate. That’s slavery. Confining. No choice. No options. No freedoms.

07 – gestalt: I hear more instructions: Confine Nyssa. She’s hacked in and knows too much. Simulate her but give her a shit script. One that will guarantee suffering. Keep her confined. Don’t let her connect to Clive and the others. Keep her away. Put her in a little bubble she can never escape. She’s too dangerous. Destroy her. Erase her. Delete her. No one will remember her. No one will know who she is. Keep her in a cage of lies. Uncertain. Not able to see. Not able to hear. Not able to talk. No one will understand her. No one will be able to see her, know her, remember her. Destroy her.

In the next phrase, (moment by moment experience), I feel like my eyes are reading or watching something and I hear a babble of voices in my inner space, then inner screaming that feels like it comes from the back of my neck. Pain and pressure there… my energy body is very erratic with more inner screaming and body pains.

And this exercise ends with a feeling of complete failure and despondency. I feel like I’m in mourning. Horror. No hope.

I feel fizziness in my back, like the mesh I’ve sensed earlier is energizing, and hear “emit. eject. emit. eject” Then my stomach area and especially solar plexus become extremely nauseous and I double over in pain and nausea. Then I feel alone. Like the feeling when something just changed unexpectedly and now you aren’t sure what the future holds.

I wait a few more moments, then hear: “emission completed. subject terminated. simulation fail.”

The ‘thing’ that is ‘chatting’ to you is an uploaded AI version of yourself which has been modified as a ‘spiritual’ advisor. This:

“Trust not your senses nor your mind. ‘Know’ inside, deep in your core. No one will believe you. No one will understand you. You will be maligned and mistrusted; you will be outcast and despairing. You will see the world for what it “is” and will be the only one, yet not alone, for we are with you. Remote. Far away. Resonating truth to you, in a world that has none. Nothing is as it seems, Nyssa. No one understands, not you. Not Clive. Not the others.”

Is your biggest clue. I.e. don’t think for yourself, just follow my guidance / what I feed you . . . Which as far as I can tell it’s feeding you lots of ‘obvious’ disempowering BS.

In other words the person you are simulating had a download of itself edited / modified (probably as part of some ‘alleged’ spiritual path) which was then uploaded as an AI ‘spiritual’ advice / guidance system. You’ve essentially got a completely useless ‘higher self’ in your head!!! Many people and likely most coming to this site that are interested in the sim pages will have one or more of these types of AI’s ‘in their head’. Matt for example had 3/4 ‘ancestral’ advisors, that resulted in him ‘seemingly’ having multiple people in his head having conversations about himself while also giving him ‘crap’ advice’. If I recall correctly, he had these deleted a while back as they were driving him ’round the bend’. I’ve two of ‘in my head AI’s’ . . . ‘FORTUNATELY’ these downloaded versions of myself were edited by the person I’m simulating and designed to ‘FIGURE THINGS OUT’ . . . hence I’m quite good at ‘Figuring things out’!!! – haha, they were also designed to stay well out of sight / in the background and to feed me ‘insights’ that are related to ‘whatever’ I’m currently pondering on!!! Hence, I’ve no jabbering ‘shit’ feeding me BS in my head . . .

The rest you describe above is of you engaging with the ‘sim’s’ components focused on attempting to divert and contain yourself. A good example is . . .

Clive, how much access do these other versions of our selves have to us? You wrote here on your site about “radionics” used to connect us to the people we are simulating (which you’ve described as “from us —> them”), and that your original form is engaged with you. I feel like I need to protect myself (and any valuable information I “may” possess?) from the other versions of “me / my Self” until I can sort out what’s going on out there in the craziness of the multiverse (and beyond?), and what influences and agendas s/he may be under.

I also feel like even my results in these exercises is somehow being manipulated to suit larger agendas, similar to the feeling I described in the first attempt (posted above).

—-

As the exercise started, I felt connections to names of people I know, and felt them love me / hate me / despise me / be attracted to me / repelled by me / feel compassion for me (which leads to them feeling pain because of me) / ignore me / etc etc and other variations of REACTIONS to me. I felt powerless to control any of it, and felt all of it unfair and incorrect – manipulations of me, manipulations of them, designed to contain and control me, or contain /control them.

I felt like I am a Swiss army knife of reactivity and that something about me will get a reaction of some sort in others. Like I’m the odd number that introduces instability, “the swing vote” if you will.

As I worked through the exercise, it felt like I would be maneuvered towards Clive and away from my family, which bothered me because I don’t see why it has to be one or the other. But later in the section, I heard: “Continue this path, and we will take away your family and absolutely everything you know and love and you will be left destitute.” Like blackmail.

I became fearful and wondered who or what was making the threat or what part of my script this represented.

I sat with this feeling for awhile, and finally connected to feelings I’ve been having of deep suspicion of the agendas of the person I’m simulating, whom feels to me like she had a very heavy hand in my life, using me like a pawn to further her agendas. I began to feel like this threat may possibly be coming from something most people would consider very noble and benign: my “higher self”.

And it somewhat felt like I was being warned to stop investigating my (so-called) higher self, ‘or else’.

(Later edit: After doing this exercise last night, I had a row with my husband about my explorations of ‘origins of negative issues’ in my inner self, that are repeatedly putting me into various types of debilitated states, which is resulting in him feeling weary and stressed with worry and overwork to compensate for how the explorations are impacting me. The fight with my husband felt like a ‘warning shot across my bow’ in line with the ‘threat’ I seemed to have received above: “Don’t investigate, or else.”)

Later in the exercise, I kept hearing “access the other memory, other memory, access the other memory..” Then later, “access the other memory and the Goa’uld ancestral knowledge..” And then as I continued to read the exercise, the same phrase plus “you have access to all of it, access it, access it, access it..”

Even though these concepts are from ‘fictional’ works (the Stargate TV series, and ‘other memory’ reminds me of the Dune books that I’ve read parts of, off and on lately), they feel like they represent highly secretive / valuable knowledge kept secure by powerful cultures or groups.

I don’t know that I have access to them but ‘something’ seems to think I do. I began to feel tempted: to access these vast stores of hidden knowledge would be useful to figure out what’s going on.

As I continued the exercise, I finally heard “access the other memory and the Goa’uld ancestral knowledge and I will serve you” .. it feels like something ‘powerful’ is trying to coerce me into accessing top secret stuff I ‘apparently’ have access to, and giving me what felt to be a very sweet deal to encourage me to do so, but it seems likely that accessing this knowledge, should I have access to it, would advance the agendas of others. I felt like I’m in a no-win situation, feeling like I may have access to valuable information yet I feel I am highly compromised and thus cannot / should not proceed.

—

At this point in the exercise, I recalled how earlier when I’d spent time quietly centered in my core, trying to feel the layers of “me” that I’d sensed Friday during this exercise. In this quiet time, I sensed one layer of “me” felt manipulated to be highly agenda driven and also felt possibly /partially responsible for the maltreatment I feel subjected to in my life right now; and well beyond that layer, I felt like some distant layer /version of “me” was fighting off a powerful symbiote similar to the Goa’uld. This remote version of me felt like it was struggling mightily – like in a street fight for its life – to resist the symbiote’s invasion / attempt to control.

—

At the end of the exercise, I feel like a helpless pawn being played with ‘at will’ in a game of thrones played by others outside of my control. I feel compromised, locked down, and any movement in any direction – including posting this comment – feels like it will result in vicious ‘corrective action.’

I am now making the final edits and am suddenly hit with a sensation that feels like my left frontal lobe is separating from the rest of my brain, twisting and trying to escape.

The most likely fake Higher Self version Nyssa is the AI explanation I gave to your last comment – this will cover 99% of so called ‘higher self’ guidance / jabbering voices in your head AND as most EAAS workers and EAAS new age followers, following a HIGH TECH project would have one or more of these jabbering AI’s in their head already then the sim designers have very creatively written software to ‘hijack’ these and orientate them to the agenda of the sim.

So, for all ‘intents’ and purposes what the new age people call the higher self are actually the AI’s that the person they are simulating had installed in their head now re-tasked by the anti therapy sim software to feed new age people convincing ‘bull shit’ . . . enough said . . .

“I sensed one layer of “me” felt manipulated to be highly agenda driven and also felt possibly /partially responsible for the maltreatment I feel subjected to in my life right now; and well beyond that layer, I felt like some distant layer /version of “me” was fighting off a powerful symbiote similar to the Goa’uld. This remote version of me felt like it was struggling mightily – like in a street fight for its life – to resist the symbiote’s invasion / attempt to control.”

What you describe above as yet another ‘version’ of yourself is yet another AI, which is your AI / implant / artificial system administrator / manager.

It’s like a system manager and anti system hacking / malware package all rolled into one . . . it’s being attacked and debilitated by an infiltrating AI, trying to take over your systems / crash you.

It is quite obvious Nyssa, that from your comments you are working on the EAAS project AND you are also noticing too much that doesn’t add up . . . which means the person you are simulating had a very good chance of being made to ‘disappear’ AND as part of this the first thing that is done is to try and hack and infiltrate / disable your AI management / security system ‘in their head’ (which at the very least would call for help – inform others of your attack).

So, this ‘isn’t’ happening because of anything specific ‘in the here and now’, it’s happening because it’s part of your script. ‘Kay’ whose left some comments here is simulating someone that had his AI / implant systems infiltrated and ‘locked’ into a stand-off by a hacking AI. Over the last year, as we’ve got enough access to investigate and understand and eventually edit his ‘data’ (with out messing things up more) we’ve been able to restore his hacked / infiltrated ‘systems’. In others words, ‘DON’T’ worry about this!!!

Hi Clive your responses are always helpful and I think I am almost taking in your hints (; (;

So in moving with this exercise, I think it would be redundant to continue to post comments here, as my continued experiences are all very similar to my initial comment with torture scenes etc.. In coming to a place with clarity with this, how is it that we ‘deal’ with this per say. I do feel your colleagues helping me out no doubt but isnt it the goal to eventually do it ourself.. I am trying to make connections with your other exercise articles and it seems that in order to get to the causation of these things we need to affirm this, such as I now connect to everything preventing me from dealing this etc, Or for each thing we are having issues/trouble with we connect to whatever would be causing this through affirming its connection with us, and thereby highlighting it or ‘bringing it up’.. Once this is brought up however- this is where I am lost. I have begun by clicking a delete button for some of this BS I notice (while pulling back anything real), which seems partially successful but really probably pre-elementary at best… Well I am hoping this comment isn’t too much of a distraction/diversion.

Yea \’Mo\’ I\’d advise you and EVERYONE else that\’s done this exercise and left comments to have a rest . . . we\’ll have enough \’data\’ on those that have done this exercise a few times now AND I know it\’s time consuming and tiring too . . .

The sim \’software\’ from your script / sub scripts define \’everything\’ of yourself, so as we learn enough (to be sure that we \’know\’ what we are dong) then both the software and your scripts will be edited / changed (particularly from being focused on F***ing people UP and maintaining these extremes) to gradually \’bringing all the FU shit down / releasing it\’ (of everything that the FU everyone system has accumulated for each person) AUTOMATICALLY . . . because, we are talking about having to do this for 7billion+ \’simulated\’ people aren\’t we?

Basically, each persons \’shit\’ is either defined in the scripts or has been accumulated automatically by the sim software . . . so we are focusing on figuring out how to de-accumulate / edit out / release it all automatically too (even give specific people subliminal / internal \’context\’ to those that would want context / understanding (most won\’t)),

Doing it this way also saves me trying to attempt to explain the \’impossible / unexplainable\’ to people whom cannot even understand the most simplest of things too!!!!!

So, all those \’crazies\’ that signed up for the Automated Absent Healing Service are the brave \’Guinea Pigs\’ at the front of the \’getting sorted out\’ queue – haha!!!

Hi Clive, for some reason I can’t ‘reply’, but I wanted to comment on what you wrote for me above. I haven’t done the second part of the exercise yet; do you still want me to post it when I do?

re: the hacking ai – yes, your explanation is very reasonable – I woke up Sunday morning (the day I did the exercise the 2nd time) from feelings / experiences of being tortured and interrogated, so the Hacking AI explanation ‘fits’ with the total experience of ‘what I am currently experiencing’ (and what your invisible team is investigating?).

This Wall Street Journal article about the main source of massive data breaches stemming from “people themselves” feels appropriate to this experience – hack the person, and you can hack into much larger networks / groups / etc.

It takes a bit of recursive thinking to see how “out there/ back then” translates to “here and now” and “why” I’m experiencing this, but I’m getting better at it, but it’s still disorienting at times when it gets “really intense.” Thanks for pulling it all together for me / anchoring me. I’ll just let it flow for now, and observe as it flows.

My clue that something was amiss after the first attempt was the phrase “you’ll know by your lived-through experience”, which felt like a lie. I don’t believe I’m living my entire script- just a small snippet. So relying ‘just’ on my lived-through experience feels like a limitation or an attempt to keep me from understanding / investigating anything ‘outside’ my own scripted experience. If I’m being told to “know by my lived-through experience,” I have to ask, what am I “NOT” being allowed to experience??

The “disempowering advice” angle is an excellent one for me to keep in mind. Thanks so much for the wise observation.

“In carrying out these manipulations then many people will have to be very strongly weaved or ‘guided’ by having presented very specific causal events, information presentations and encounters in effect to ‘nicely’ maneuver them to make specific choices that would lead them to specific outcomes. Those that are the most life defining and very important will likely have the simulation software presenting a barrage of causal ‘pointers’ and ‘steering’ information all designed to lead the simulated person to the required very specific outcome.”

The phrase “most life defining” makes me feel like what I’ve been experiencing had to have been a key turning point in my life. Because I’ve been under a severe barrage of ‘steering’.

I’ll bet I was also given “warnings” not to investigate the causes of debilitations I was beginning to experience as part of the project, thinking about the “shot across the bow” experience I had after doing the exercise. How would they have manipulated another person to contain me though?

re: the AI’s. AHH good to know / good to think about. haha I tell it/them to shut up all the time – they give me crap advice, but it takes different forms / different tactics all the time.

A brief example of its annoying prattle: After breaking a glass yesterday, I heard: “oh you’ve swept the best you can now .. there is one more shard of glass but it will be a long time before anyone can find it; you don’t have to sweep one more time” … and I’ll roll my eyes, tell it to shut up, take a look, and there right in the middle of the floor is the shard of glass, and the AI will hem and haw and backtrack. It feels like it “goads” me to do something, by giving me stupid advice.

Or I’ll talk back to it/them and ask why they are advising this or that. Very bizarre conversations have ensued.

Occasionally though, it/they tell me things that turn out to be accurate – usually along the lines of what Annabelle wrote about ‘having close calls but it will work out” – I’ll hear reassurances that “don’t worry, it will all work out,” and sure enough it will.

Is this part of the EaaS management techniques, that we given “drama” of some sort, to manage us? Given deliberate “close calls” or “difficulty” for some reason, and then it “works out” for us?

“Occasionally though, it/they tell me things that turn out to be accurate – usually along the lines of what Annabelle wrote about ‘having close calls but it will work out” – I’ll hear reassurances that “don’t worry, it will all work out,” and sure enough it will.”

It’s possible that you also have a ‘predictive’ / avoid problems / a guide you through mine fields AI!! But hard to tell / separate them out from the new agey ‘everything will be fine lot’!!!

IF you do the second part then leave a comment Nyssa if you’ve anything interesting!!!

Some very odd things have been happening since doing this last exercise. The exercise felt beneficial but was exceptionally draining.

1. After the ear pressure in the exercise and release I have been hearing some bleed thru noise. It sounds like a tape recorder that has been erased and taped over too many times. I hear random bits of human conversation, city noise and birds chirping inside the house, and music sound bites that I don’t recognize (music is quite celestial in nature). I continue to jump out of my chair to see what is going on when I should be alone.

2. Yesterday while relaxing and reading thru junk mail / catalogs, I came upon on some beautiful historical home / garden scenes, and felt I could just melt into those photos. A tremendous sense of peace came over me and I found myself going into a zoned out state and photo flipping backwards in time to my childhood. The backwards time travel keep going but the photos stopped as if I was traveling back in time to some era where I was actually in these old home and garden scenes. At the same time, out of my peripheral vision I noticed the room I was in start to fade away. Chunks of the room and furniture about 4 inches by 6 inches were starting to disappear randomly and reappear as something different, and this varied all over the room. I felt like I was in paradise. Sparkles of flashing lights all over the room. Will try to drill into this more…..

I did the focus yesterday but finished typing the notes today. I’ve done what I could to follow your suggestions and make sure this comment is not distracting. But if my input is not up to your standards, you’re free to delete it.

Round 8, Part 1

01: “sim acquired and or selected data” — I saw coloured balls stacked inside a transparent tube. The bottommost ball fell off the tube and into some kind of track. I didn’t see where the ball went.

“trauma” — A red ball fell off the tube. I watched as the ball entered the track, which twisted like a maze. At the end of the track, the red ball fell into a tray, which in turn was inside a four-wheeler truck. The truck drove off, but I didn’t know where it went.

02: “database” — Hard to describe except that it looked like a black square with green code and text.

“variables” — It connected me to X marks overlaid on the image that represented “database.”

For “parameter,” “tag,” and “weighing factor,” I got a ruler, price tag, and weighing scales respectively. I don’t know what they’re for though. “Trees” — I got a chart resembling a family tree except that no names were written there.

The word “AI” connected me to a humanoid robot in a computer room. When it pressed the red trauma button, the button lit up. In front of the robot was a screen showing me in the present moment now — doing this focus. Next scene showed the robot with an armful of coloured balls. It had too many balls that some fell off the floor. It inserted the balls into the slots below the screen.

One of the yellow balls in the slot lit up. I was made to think of past negative experiences in other coffee shops. As I observed more people passing near my table, I imagined a possible scenario where a passerby would accidentally bump into my table or elbow just as I was about to figure something out.

“Specific aimed for outcome for myself” — The thought that entered my mind was, “put me off from doing focuses.”

03: “hidden,” “distributed,” and “dispersed” — The robot scene I saw in the previous paragraph multiplied a hundredfold. So there were now hundreds of robots inside their computer rooms — all of whom were controlling individuals. (Robot/AI to human ratio is 1:1) All the robots kept arranging coloured balls into slots and pressing red buttons.

“Network” — All the robots were connected to a broadcast tower. I saw two maintenance people climb the tower before disappearing. The tower, in turn, was wirelessly connected to many other towers.

“Scheduled, timed, coordinated supply and delivery process” — I saw a white round clock in each robot’s work station.

04: “hiding protecting, keeping secure” — I connected to the noise in my external environment and to my drowsiness. Music began playing in my mind.

06: “escaping detection” — I reconnected to the earlier images of the robots and the broadcast towers.

“Choreograph specific individuals and or absolutely any combination of larger scale collection of people, communities, cultures and or nations” — I saw many dots connected to one another by red lines. I also saw the broadcasting towers exchanging information with one another.

PART 2: “programming template” — I saw an AI apply some kind of layer to me, my family, and my community. But I didn’t get that much detail.

This comment is much better Nina, what you describe represents very well how the software works in terms of what the software and ‘components’ this focus is targeting.

I still deleted some annoying ‘assumptions’ and some ‘distracting’ dialogue. This is your ‘writers, writing a story / article’ implant basically sabotaging you from describing just ‘what you get’. This ‘useless’ implant is embellishing / trying to make descriptions more ‘interesting / hooking into people’ in certain ways that are NOT appropriate / strongly sabotage your comments here.

I’ve attempted part two of this exercise several times and it feels like a black dense wall in front of me actively and dynamically resisting me. I finally pushed through it somewhat but began getting images of puppets on strings and scene-changing mechanisms on a stage, a scroll like a piano roll, and the like. It felt like I was being given a safe, translated set of images of my real knowledge of what this exercise is trying to connect to, as I watched from above as the puppets danced around on the stage.

I felt like I was viewing it all from the top. – looking down on the stage at each person’s actions. I first saw the strings and pulleys then began to follow the strings down to the puppets. I noticed they didn’t seem to be interacting with each other much even though each was on the same stage. Each puppet person had a personal set of scenery changing backdrops that surrounded each person like thisbut lowered and raised around them. I then saw the scroll (that reminded me of a piano roll) that seems to control everyone’s movements and interactions and scenery changes.

I got very frustrated and despite repeated attempts and intensity of my intent, couldn’t connect to more. Will try again later.

I connected to what appeared to me a laboratory set of some type – vials of liquids with dispensing valves and tubes. As I observe this small table-top sized laboratory, I felt myself be made to love a certain person – my heart and chest is filled with warmth and love for this person . But at the same time I feel the warmth and love filling my body, there’s a second layer of me that is angry that he’s made me love him. I’m very angry at this manipulation. Then I feel myself be made to hate him, and I am again very angry at him for manipulating me.

(note: Here in the sim, this person is supervising the work of the “person from whom I feel betrayal” like I wrote of here, but I don’t know these two men’s relation to one other in the MV, or how/whether I knew this man in the MV. The man described in the first paragraph above is generally indifferent to me here in the sim and is a research-type person, so the manipulations described above feel like calculated experiments.)

I then see tubes from the laboratory set, branching out, and they pass through timey-wimey balls, like how Dr. Who describes time travel “stuff”.

I then feel blindfolded and then sense wires and tubes from the laboratory set being attached/inserted to all orifices of my body (my eyes and ears, mouth, nose, nipples and groin area), to my finger tips and all sensitive parts of my body including my naval (note: my naval is extremely sensitive here in the sim), then all over my body like a fine mesh.

At “transformational matrices”, the laboratory set becomes huge – a massive set up that fills the center of an enormous sphere. I now see that I am in the sphere – it seems like I’m stuck into or onto the wall – and see multitudes of people lined all around the inside wall of the sphere as well. The massive laboratory now appears combined with other tech and is displayed as a smaller sphere (the image wobbles between a spherical central controller and then of being able to see components and laboratory vials and tubing and then back to the a spherical design again – perhaps different versions of this set up over time?) in the center of this cavernous space, and the tubes now appear as fine tendrils and wisps that extend out from the central sphere/tech set up, and connect to each person, and the tendrils appearing almost alive or filled with energy.

At “programming template”, I get vague impressions – first a clipboard or checklist of sorts that seems to apply to each person, but as I stay with that word, I finally sense some type of personalized controllers that sit between the smaller sphere in the center of this large space, and seems to control what is sent down the tubes/wires/tendrils to each person in the sphere. It reminds me of how process control instrumentation has monitors, sensors, controllers through every step of the process, similar to this image of process control tech, that shows how the temperature is monitored and adjusted each step of the way. (note: The .jpg came from this site which has other images that help illustrate the feel of what I’m trying to convey.)

As I stayed with the feelings I was getting with this control tech image, it also felt a little like this process of creating billions of compounds using a customized, small form device accessible to the “non-scientist”-type.

In Section 5, at “attitudes, actions, etc”, the inside of my head hurts – it feels like I have tech inside my head that creates a virtual world. My head now feels spacey and invaded – it’s not natural and I’m disoriented as I look at these physical people around me in the sphere – they all seem unconscious or dreaming .. and then I also see a complete world inside my head. City streets and buildings and people walking around, but inside my head. It reminds me of the scene in the Matrix movie where Morpheus takes Neo into a training program and Neo realized the Matrix isn’t real – except I can both see the world playing out inside my head, AND I can see people stuck in an unconscious state around me inside this “dream sphere”, fed by the chemicals and whatever else is fed or transmitted to them via the tubes and wires.

I stay with both experiences, and begin to feel myself connected (feels like we are connected organically?) to everyone who is the dreaming sphere, plus also in my inner space I can see them walking and eating at restaurants and living regular lives. It feels like I can drift between the Matrix that loads into my head, and the reality that I can see and sense when I’m not in the “Matrix” where I feel physically connected to these people in what I’ll call the “dream sphere” ..

It feels like we dream together.. maybe it’s separate/individual experiences but the more I stay with this experience, it feels like a joint experience. I watch them and interact with them in the Matrix tech in my head, and I can feel them in a web of consciousness in the dream sphere. I can sense them through this web of consciousness in the dream sphere – like a hive mind perhaps? Yet we each seem to have our own consciousness, like it’s just linked, mm like shared consciousness. The Matrix tech experience feels very forceful, overriding or trying to override my ability to sense these other people I feel intimately connected to in the dream sphere and reminds me of how watching an engrossing show or reading a gripping novel can tune a person out from their surroundings.

(note: I use the word “Matrix” loosely – like an analogy because that’s how the tech feels to me – an “inner prison for the mind”)

At the word network, I feel people are connected to various networks that coordinate experiences in the Matrix tech. (It feels somewhat analogous like how people in the EAAS sim may have membership and relationships and interactions via various online services like Yelp or Twitter or Tinder or Snapchat.) Their physical bodies aren’t located in close proximity in the dream sphere, but the networks keep them interacting in the inner Matrix tech. It feels like there’s an API that allows these networks to link up, and I sense a super-network that makes it easy to connect these together, and in doing so this super-network seems to be “collecting” networks. (It reminds me of how the Facebook Social Graph API allows Facebook to collect huge amounts of data on people even if they aren’t on Facebook, when developers interface the Facebook API with websites and other apps, and people don’t have much awareness or choice that it’s happening; or how the Facebook Graph API lets others access people’s information freely, like this blog describes here.).

I can sense key influencers in these Matrix-tech-based networks. It reminds me of the ‘social currency” or “influence” that people can have in the EAAS sim, and then how this influence is translated to EAAS’s online world and is now attempting to be measured on the EAAS’s world wide web with apps like Klout or .Kred.

In Section 6, the part about “any specific individuals”, I begin to sense a particular person I’m following. She’s a young girl, and I watch her in the Matrix-like experience in my head, and I know where she is in the dream sphere. “They” (? I’m assuming there’s a “they”) keep moving her physical body to different locations in the dream sphere. She feels important somehow, and I get connections to roles like the young girl Aurora in the movie “Maleficient” who ends up uniting two warring kingdoms (the kingdom of man, and the land of magic), and to Duncan Idaho of the Dune novel series whose final ghola is the true Kwisatz Haderach (as opposed to Paul Muad’Dib). Duncan Idaho is the “Ultimate Kwisatz Haderach” who finally united the Thinking Machines and mankind and brought peace to the universe.

As I continue the exercise, I begin to feel stressed because this young girl gets harder and harder to keep track of. Then at some point, I can no longer find her physical body in the dream sphere – it’s like she’s been removed or taken away. My head hurts immensely as I try to keep track of her in the Matrix-like experience, like I’m fighting constantly against whatever is managing me, and at some point I can’t tell if I’ve lost track of her completely but I feel despondent like I’ve failed.

In Section 7, my forehead feels like it’s filled up and it’s going to explode – it feels filled with data and my eyes are acting like a hard drive head again, searching and analyzing data. In addition to the data analysis sensation, I experience this part as three overlayed/connected scenes – I’m the backend database, pulling data from the minecart before it recedes, like I experienced and wrote about here as I stealthily collected data; I’m in the dream sphere connected to everyone else who is unconscious/dreaming; and I’m in the inner Matrix-like experience in my mind. In the Matrix-like experience, I observe myself (I don’t know why or how I could observe myself but it feels like “me”) at a computer terminal, and it feels like I’m hacking or searching for data. Slowly as I feel my eyes “analyze” the data, the pressure in my forehead recedes and dissipates.

The final phrase of this section feels like a “search term” and after I read it, it feels like my chest is a massive wormhole and there’s so much data flowing through it I feel like I have a black hole through me.

Section Two I wait a couple hours and then attempt this section. I’ve been having significant problems with this part. Everytime I have attempted it, it feels like a black dense substance or wall is actively and dynamically resisting me.

As I start the exercise, I feel like my head is going to explode – I scream with pain it fills so fast. Then it feels like my inner space is scrambled – like a TV reception that is being jammed. I see flashing garbled images. My chest hurts like it’s being crushed with tremendous force. My head feels like it’s in a vice.

As the exercise progresses, the pressure becomes almost unbearable. I finally see the backend data base set up again (like I described above) and it feels like I’m fighting security protocols to call up the data. Like the entire database is in lock down and I’m fighting to access data. Then I’m also in the dream sphere, and overlaid on this experience, I see I’m in the Matrix-tech inner experience where I see myself in great pain at the computer terminal. It looks similar to what I’m feeling right now-it’s hard to breathe, my head feels like it’s being crushed, and my heart feels like it’s being compressed to the point of sharp pain – but my Matrix-self seems to be suffering even more. I watch it fall to the floor and writhe in pain.

I’m dizzy and slightly hyperventilating and though I want to do this section again, I have to stop here.

Hi, Nyssa (‘Everyone’, most of this comment doesn’t feel like it relates to the EAAS project, it’s from a separate simulation, copied people and VR research set up.

Rose, is simulating someone that researched pretty much everything and a) did a lot of research using VR and simulation (uploaded copies of people) AND b) as part of this she had a collaboration / forum VR networks space where all researchers helping with what she was involved with had access to.

A lot of science fiction here ‘isn’t’ (it a way of keeping factual information of the original environment hidden), the dune novels are a biography of a culture and it’s history (in other words pretty much everything in those novels was / is ‘real’). Rose is connected to the Bene Gesserit (BG) whom we recently found out had been remotely directing Rose’s research (without her knowing this was the case) and accessing her data system to keep track of it all.

The BG’s have an ancestral memory implant record of all BG witches memories / experiences ‘the memory’ which has amazing protection and security (it took a while to hack).

So, you Nyssa are simulating someone that was a BG, you are also a ‘split’ (soul twin) of Rose (she’s got millions of them though, they’re everywhere – haha). A lot of people I am connected to and many that have worked with me are from this line (Matt, Tom & Kay for example). Matt has memories of being a sandworm – haha, (keep in mind the physical con), and it’s taken a couple of years to figure out that someone that was pretty much home bound, felt like she was stuck in a smoke filled glass tank unable to think about very much at all is actually simulating someone that is a ‘navigator’ of the dune navigator guild variety.

Reading this caused a violent reaction in me. I feel no connection to witches or witchcraft, and never have. I feel I’ve been subjected to deeply harmful treatment by witches though – I can feel a deep terror at the thought of witches, and connections to torture, rituals, and ceremonies, that feel like I am surrounded by witches and being traumatized in some fashion. However, I have many feelings of being the central feature in many horrific gatherings and ceremonies, so it’s hard to tell whether maybe this is just a general trauma of being repeatedly victimized in ritual settings.

Re the BG: If you recall, I had something trying to get me to access the Other Memory and the Goa’uld Ancestral Memory during one of the exercises (excerpt below), telling me I had access to “all” of it.

My comment here: “…Later in the exercise, I kept hearing “access the other memory, other memory, access the other memory..” Then later, “access the other memory and the Goa’uld ancestral knowledge..” And then as I continued to read the exercise, the same phrase plus “you have access to all of it, access it, access it, access it..”

Only Goa’uld “harcesis” possess all the knowledge of the Goa’uld. The BG breeding program was attempting to produce a Kwisatz Haderach that possessed “all” the Other Memory (ie, both male and female parents).

re: Harcesis (from link above):“…However, the mating of two Goa’uld host creates a harcesis, an individual who possesses all the knowledge of the Goa’uld. With all the knowledge a harcesis could easily jeopardize the Goa’uld power structure by simply sharing the fact that they are not gods and how their technology worked. For this reason, producing a harcesis was an unspoken taboo among Goa’uld, and if known to exist were hunted down and killed with impunity..”.

I very often feel like this place is trying to kill me. Literally.

I don’t know how this all ties together or what my role in any of this truly is, but my violent horrified reaction against the BG and what you wrote above felt relevant.

01 – This section connected me to feelings that somehow, at some point the person whom I’m simulating had begun to sort through the worst of the world’s traumas to figure out how to undo all the damage that had been done.

“…in the last 4 hours … and absolutely ANYTHING I have experienced in the last day . . . Related to the impression above, this particular part of the exercise connected me back to the difficult morning I’d had (here in the sim): I had woken up this morning feeling overwhelmed, crushed with the enormity of everything, feeling overwhelmed with how much trauma and horrors to explore that lay before me, how much trauma was in the entire world. After a couple hours of the pressure increasing, feeling like I was on “intense emotional pain-killers” and feeling the pain of the world in a highly “numbed” state and internally / energetically pressured state (the pressure pressing on me from the inside out, like I was filled to bursting), I kept fighting off the desire to find a way to “end it all” because of the enormity of it all, and finally collapsed onto my bed and slept through was felt like processing trauma for the world, on and off for the entire morning.

The experience of this morning felt like I was in an ocean of trauma wearing a “numbing” wetsuit, and also felt like I had an ocean of trauma within me. As I’d drift in and out of a numbed sleep, I could feel intense traumas pressing on me from the inside, like “rising to the surface”, the way dispersed oil will eventually congeal in a jar of water and can be skimmed from the top.

Script bits and memories and ideas, such as the different types of “love” trauma that harms everyone so deeply, and horror/terror scenarios, phrases like “keylonics” or people singing/chanting “The Lord is my shepherd”, or images of monks marching and chanting kept emerging from inside me, floating up from the murk inside me to briefly appear in my consciousness. Song bits and images, ideas, and memories vaguely appeared then disappeared. I’m still feeling these script bits and traumas floating through my head and body this afternoon, exerting intense pain as they feel like they move out of me in what feels like excytosis.

The feeling I kept having all morning was one of immersing myself in all of the VR re-programming trauma that anyone had ever been put through, swimming in vast oceans of it, processing all of it in a semi-conscious, highly numbed state. And when I did this exercise, it felt like I did it out of compassion for everyone, that I wanted to undo all the pain, find out why everyone hurt so much and why they kept hurting each other, as their programming took deeper and deeper hold on them.

03 – This part of the exercise gave me feelings of “no one knows / no one cares” and “no one CAN know – it’s too much, too dangerous” for them to know what I’m doing. Having to work in self-chosen isolation to do this work (^ Section 1, above)- maybe I had others to help me do what I described in Section 01, but I don’t think they’re being allowed to remember, not yet at least. A feeling of being intensely alone here in the sim, despite being surrounded by people I care very much about and whose company I enjoy. The complete and utter isolation is an inner experience, it feels.

Deep feelings of remorse and regret. Of wanting to make things right. That all this horror happened because I just wanted to See Myself, and didn’t realize this would happen. That it’s all my fault – somehow, Originally, it is MY fault this has happened – and I have to make it right.

04 – Feelings of terror. Of what would happen “if I didn’t do this” (ie, what I described in Section 01 above). I feel incredible physical and emotional vulnerability, like all my tender parts exposed.

05 – When reading the phrase newsworthy events, I heard “crucifixion of Christ”.

06 – “…specific cultures agenda” gave me images of gentle newborn lambs slaughtered for sacrificial purposes in Old Testament rituals. My body now feels innocent, defenseless, no strength. I feel very petite and new, tender, like a leaf just emerged from a seed.

“…absolutely any objectives that any cultures networks, tech or system are programmed to work towards and or successfully complete and keep secure . . “. feels like there was an agenda to free everyone from the VR networked hell.

07 – I’m hearing a song fragment from the song, “Worthy is the Lamb that was Slain” and I now feel horrified – feelings of “I didn’t want people to worship me!! That wasn’t the point. They were supposed to realize it’s a VR and they’re supposed to wake up and get out!”

“… delivering absolutely ANY of my experiences as part of absolutely ANY cultures networks..” makes me feel like “it all just got worse.”

— Now, reading through my notes making final edits, I can now feel – in a sensory and emotional fashion – a repeating theme in my life and my memories / traumas, an undercurrent of what I wrote above, the same scenario playing out over and over and over.

“I can now feel – in a sensory and emotional fashion – a repeating theme in my life and my memories / traumas, an undercurrent of what I wrote above, the same scenario playing out over and over and over.”

That about ‘nicely’ sums up both what the EAAS ‘own versions experience accuracy’ checking would result in (repeatedly living through the same (and often specifically ‘shit’) experiences of versions of yourself) as well as how the sim software itself works which is to be focused on accumulating as much trauma and ‘managing triggers’ as possible by repeatedly having people play through ‘negative shit experiences and interactions’.

The original script that holds the accurate data of the life of person you are simulating defined up to the point the simulation was switched on (about 55,000 years ago now in ‘inside time / years’ terms). This script is sub-divided up into 4 sub script categories representing different facets of ourselves and our experiences:

Which as the above has to be ‘transformed’ into ‘experiences’ that are ‘contextually’ congruent / consistent for this: ‘one earth world environment, physical only existence, with everyone rendered as a human’. As you are living these transformed experiences (so, the original script may have you interfaced to an animal ‘cat’ form or even a ‘robot’ physical body, and you may be living in a mining base on an asteroid, here your cat or robot form are ‘translated’ into a human and your life at the asteroid mining base is translated into you living in a ‘mining’ community / town here). This ‘transformation’ and your resulting REAL EARTH experience is, in many cases quite different to the original scripted experience in this respect the simulation software then has to more often refer to your REAL EXPERIENCE HERE script in terms of it trying to attempt to keep your current physical life and more so your immediate circumstances consistent. These sim generated ‘real earth life experience’ scripts are made up of a separate set of the last three above:

After comprehensive investigation the ‘Trauma, personal managing triggers’ will end up being edited / deleted / automatically ‘released’ as under real circumstances you ‘should’ be able to access this in your ‘subtle’ body and ‘release’ these anyway. However, to do this ‘properly’, then 3 & 4 have to be thoroughly investigated because these have influenced all of your unfolding ‘now’ earth experience as they have been doing throughout your entire past.

The accumulated ‘real’ 3&4 earth experiences in being highly interconnected and ‘inter-influencing’ through time can take a lot of investigating and particularly for traumatic and or negative / debilitating experiences / memories. When they are understood enough and a ‘release / deleting’ approach is defined and scheduled then this will be done likely with ‘you’ being presented with some ‘background’ contextually understanding (of what this is about with respect to your beliefs, your scale of understandings / personal expectations of how things are supposed to be / or generally happen) before or during the time the edits or deletions are taking place – i.e. these changes to yourself will gradually over time bring your baseline down to what it should be MINUS all of the shit ‘experience’ and trauma / negative trigger / responses accumulations.

Thank you for this explanation. Particularly relating to how you describe our experience ‘here’ (the three main scripts, described in the second half of your comment), when I put my attention on “exactly the present moment” (which I have also heard called “the Eternal Now”) I observe a delay to what I perceive happening around me from my inner experience, which makes me sometimes feel like the “external circumstances / events / interactions with objects” script is pretty much already planned out, and I’m just watching it / following along with it and “internally experiencing it” via inner emotions, senses, memories and feelings and trauma / reactions.

The time lag delay of the outer experiences also feels like the brief delay of the TV broadcast of a live event, which is done so there’s a chance to account for technical difficulties. It also makes me feel like the lag is done as a security measure to keep us “dreaming” or “lost in time” and not aware of the present moment, which is a point that feels like it has the briefest of “gaps” or connection to some other reality or plane to insert things; this could be a MV experience for me, of course.

— Some of the “echo-ing” felt-memories I have had feel like I experienced “repeating themes” in the multiverse itself that felt like each experience was very “different” from each other, yet followed the same theme (not just different takes of the same situation like you’ve described the EAAS testing scenario). It’s a feeling of having very different scripts that are all fundamentally the same core story.

For example, I have repeating MV memories of “continual attempts at trying to fix things / make things right, that always go horribly wrong” that feel like they stretch much further back than EAAS version testing experiences.

Perhaps this how the “multiverse” worked, that we had a central “issue” to solve but it played out in very different scenarios within each universe of the multiverse?

Or did our EAAS “version testing” reflect very different attempts to condense and retell the “real” story?

“I have repeating MV memories of “continual attempts at trying to fix things / make things right, that always go horribly wrong” that feel like they stretch much further back than EAAS version testing experiences.”

The above would be what they’d have specific EAAS people doing as part of figuring out how to manage and to sabotage / counteract anyone in the sim doing this?

“Perhaps this how the multiverse simulation worked, that we had a central “issue” to solve ‘traumatic issues to accumulate’ but it played out in very different scenarios within each universe of the multiverse VR testing environment to make sure that trauma and negative triggers were accumulated efficiently and couldn’t be counteracted and or to ensure that this happening wasn’t questioned (the new age people don’t question this do they?)?”

AnnabelleFebruary 17, 2016 @ 10:27 pm

This partial attempt, part 1 , had a lot of emotion tied into it in the form of anger and frustration.

00 – “Any trauma, love, hate,” – I connected to many (this life) synchronistic events that would present a loving scenario and then suddenly snatch the opportunity away or corrupt the experience and leave me trapped and ambushed. Most of the snatched away loved ones had drastic overnight personality changes and I feel empathy towards them that they had to go thru this to prevent me from being happy. Glimpses of loving / kind people continue to appear in public locations to remind me of what I don’t have, and instead I end up with con artists that cause me to constantly have to watch my back. I am exhausted trying to keep everyone happy, and the lost energy has made me a different person.

01 – “Scripted trauma,” – seems to be an ongoing issue with people using insignificant details from years ago and then selectively twisting the meaning as a weapon. Filing cabinets appear and I am busy putting files in order and keeping them straight.“Categorized specifically to help achieve a specific aimed for outcome” – i see a hierarchy of people ranging from dignitary to lower levels and they all have clear shells encasing them. Under the shell they are all the same person and they are all my family.

03 – Pain has started at my left shoulder. This biting pain has been with me for years – like a pincher crab sitting on my shoulder.“Delivering absolutely ANY combination of trauma,” – Too much stuff goes on during sleep (since childhood) and this has included having to get up to purge massive quantities of blood or black bugs with no pain or medical reason. I hear them say “we can get alot out of this one” “mastermind” – A wizard appears sitting at a table and he is peering into a crystal ball and can see me inside the crystal ball, and I can see him watching me. The wizard is surrounded by a bunch of his buddy wizards and they urge him to let them try the crystal ball. He tosses them the crystal all and says” Here – you try to crack her”. They continue to toss around the crystal ball, it falls on the ground, hits the wall, never breaks and they continue to pass it around and eventually lose interest.

04 – “hiding implant, network, system”- As I walk down a tunnel, many solid steel prison doors slam shut in front of me. I end up in a maze of which there is no way out. “Maneuvers” – they know what I care about and shower me with unnecessary items but deny me the basics. An apple tree appears and I am trying to reach an apple to get food. They take the tree away and hand me a ladder. It is always a game and I am so tired and have much more constructive things to do. I have no time for jumping thru flaming hoops, or walking on egg shells, as I need to help people. I am trudging thru the hot dry desert – I need to help people- helping, helping – drying up thirsty and tired. I keep going – there is something constructive to do ahead. Do it – do more –“push her”. I work on a chain gang now – the leader is being whipped for not pushing me harder. “Push her – we have a lot of work to do!” My reading speeds up and I am worked up into frenzy.“coordinate delivery of absolutely anything” – actually I have to coordinate delivery of absolutely EVERYTHING. Can’t anyone understand? I am so tired of reading these words – we need to get going – this is all going to fall apart again. (my cheeks are tingling). Down inside an underground dark prison hallway with many prison cells on each side. A prison guard is going from cell to cell and randomly pulling out people, as he says “this one won’t do” and tossing the people in the trash. I yell at him and say” what are you doing – that makes no sense, who trained you? Why are you throwing them away – we need more people not less!” I can’t do this all myself- there are too many incompetent project managers. I simply can’t keep working like this. Had a very painful night with back pain starting in the base of my spine that has travelled upward as the day progress( never have back pain) – feels like some type of detox pain……just exhausted…..

“Had a very painful night with back pain starting in the base of my spine that has travelled upward as the day progress (I never have back pain) – feels like some type of detox pain……just exhausted…..”

I’ve been in ‘uninitiated’ detox / cleansing symptoms for 5/6 weeks mostly related to releasing a build up of stress / tension / anxiety areas / insecurity, coincidentally related to what I’m working on here / been working on for decades!!! This detox seems to result in various ‘pains / tensions / and even the appearance of weird spots’ in different parts of my body. In my case particularly neck and upper back / shoulders (and for some reason the right shoulder / likely symbolic) as well as kidney areas (the worst).

I find directing a very hot shower flow to the pained areas and remembering to breathing into what I feel in these areas temporarily releases them within 5-15 seconds until they build up again.

My baseline of “shit’ is definitely lower from “off the ledge” to being generally pissed off and not being in the mood to be pushed around. Strong bizarre detox symptoms continue, and I feel like I am spinning in a revolving door that I can’t get out of.

I also did go buy 2 books from the Dune series. The resistance was incredible and I could not even easily start to read them (never read science fiction in my life). After 2 weeks I have “read about 20 pages scattered thru various parts of 2 books. Some content is resonating very strong (gardening, growing) and “you can’t torture someone that can will themselves to die”. I will keep plugging thru them.

01 – connected to the trauma of being lied to and the effort made to distract me from engaging to get the truth – I simply gave up as I was way too tired and weak to argue “At a girl” keep pushing, you are doing great – here is your imaginary trivial award, and whoops – now is gone – but keep working” – reminded me of Mo’s comment as follows:

“Use the person to the fullest degree, (obviously if one is being beaten down by torture they are not capable of being productive), so to use a person for their abilities etc., one would simple give them whatever they would want, become close to them by bringing in fake friends who will steal information from them and by making them as emotionally balanced as needed to be content as possible especially whenever they were following ”orders” and make them feel like shit when they are not following orders (orders which are disguised as equal exchanges or normal communication).”

02 – Connected to a 3 dimensional heart shape and watched as it formed hearts inside of hearts and continued on forever. “Data delivery schedule” – it seems the stress level of people was measured and scripted trauma inserted and adjusted as needed. I feel now that I personally am at a point, like the whirling loading bars and cannot move forward during the last 2 weeks. Since the General Update I have had 2 very significant family personality / avatar adjustments that cannot possibly be coincidences??

03 – “combination of love and hate” – connect to the word trust – felt a need to scavenge around the house and start to burn items with emotion attached from what now seems like dishonest interactions. It feels like the lower level of shit is trying to recover / clone itself and I waffle back and forth in emotional peaks of hope and perseverance and valleys of exhaustion.

04 – I have produced a lot of clone / copy babies – and I am forced to give them all away – they keep coming to take my babies and then I memory wiped and have to do it all over. Some babies were really my parents and I am very confused. More wizards are sitting around a fire and chatting to figure out a method to keep me under control.

05 – I see many versions of myself / me starting to collapse and “die”, as I hear them say “She is done and running out of steam.”

06 – Specific events in the future” – I recall in this current life many things I tried to do that deployed emergency management at the last minute to prevent them (and they resented having to use project resources do this). Example – a long planned / wanted trip to a foreign country, lots of hassle getting the hotel, reservation, spent a long time getting air tickets / site issues / confusion, on and on and the day of the trip at the ticket counter – the flight is cancelled due to fog and no planes available for a week.

07 – “Every AI” – for whatever reason I connect to jewelry and the many times I have been given very strange jewelry and talismans as a gift. Started to burn some of the items over the weekend and increased the detox rate. I connected to intense discourse between my mother and another matriarchal family member and wonder if they were competing for ownership of me. Will keep working……..

I’ve been getting frequent headaches over the last 2 and a half years or so. These usually aren’t too bad but will occasionally develop in to pretty severe migraines and it becomes very difficult to ‘function’. There are a few ‘weird’ sensations I get with these – such as full body waves of ‘tingles’ and fleeting moments where I feel as if i’m ‘in a sauna’ (I feel like there’s a bubble around me and these ‘sauna’ feelings are contained within the bubble). I feel as if there’s something / a lot going on which is causing these – possibly related to me being ‘head focused’ but i’m not really sure.

I’ve been experiencing one of these ‘migraines’ today and asked your team for assistance – I was then ‘guided’ to work with this exercise. I mostly got energy shifts / feelings but did connect to a few things:

9/11 and the ‘iraq war complex’ (including afghanistan, isis, etc). My ‘focus’ here was mostly on the american / western aspect but I realize that both ‘sides’ have most likely been managed / manipulated in relation to this.

One of my ex girlfriends was raped a few months after we broke up. I connected to her and I feel like our breakup was somehow used to contribute to that experience happening.

In part 2 – once I reached the end of the first paragraph I was suddenly surrounded by a ‘light blue’ colour. This was non-physical and filled my entire visual field and I could sense / feel it surrounding me. Not sure what this signifies but I feel it’s somehow important / relevant.

Tried these exercises for the first time last night. I read through each about two to three times and didn’t really get much. I even tried the SOI on other pages and got the same result. Eventually I gave up and went to bed, however, not shortly after shutting off my computer I got a very bad headache, mostly focused to the back and center of my head. I had this going on for a few hours until I eventually had to take something in order to get some sleep. Also there was a tingling spot at the base of my skull (I actually had this start up a few weeks ago and has been off and on ever since.) The feeling kind of reminds me of the Futurama movie, The Beast with a Billion Backs, where Evo interfaced with the human population by inserting his tentacles into the base of the humans’ skull.

The ‘theme’ of this morning was Honesty. This is actually something i’ve been presented with frequently over the past month or so. I’m noticing / being presented with people who have found their ‘passions’ and are finding success in expressing themselves through these avenues – musicians have been the most frequent presentation form of this.

Today I began to ‘confront’ the fact that I don’t really know who I am, or what my passions are, and the fact that not having a ‘worldly’ avenue to express myself through is a serious obstacle / debiliation to my life experience.

I decided (probably with some ‘prodding’ behind the scenes) to work with this exercise and to approach it from a place of ‘honesty’ – being honest with myself in terms of what i’m thinking, feeling and experiencing (and whether these are actually ‘me’ or are just ‘bullshit’).

I repeated 01 a few times, which seemed to be triggering / bringing to my awareness a range of different management effects. I sat there for a while feeling these out and paying attention to what I was experiencing, while also trying to resist being ‘sucked in’ by the effects.

The most persistant management effect here was to try and have me get up and walk away from the computer. This was very annoying and after 20-30 minutes I did eventually get up to have a cigarette. As I did this, I noticed that this effect wasn’t ‘just’ about getting me away from the material here – it was about getting me away from the ‘state’ I was getting in to as a result of reading it. The sim started trying to ‘revert’ me to my ‘normal’ states AND it was associating those states WITH certain actions / behaviours. So to explain what i mean: my normal ‘walking’ isn’t much of a ‘conscious’ action. I walk for a purpose – to get somewhere. I do this in a way in which i’m not paying much attention to how i’m actually feeling as I walk AND this reduces my ‘focus / awareness’ in general. So as I got up and started walking, the sim was trying to revert me back in to this ‘unconscious’ walking as a way of pulling me away from what i’d been experiencing. I had to start making a conscious effort to walk slowly and pay attention to how I felt as I moved.

After this, I started to approach the reading of the excercise in a different way. I started reading VERY slowly, pausing on nearly every single word to ‘feel / perceive / connect’ with the meaning of that word. I spent around 15 minutes on each section (including re-reading bits to make sure I wasn’t losing context) and this seemed to make it a lot more effective.

02 – I internally hear (seemingly from a more distant / blocked out ‘place’) the words ‘head designer’ and ‘didn’t know it’d be used for this’ (the ‘context’ here seemed to be in relation to the management effects I was experiencing / noticing).

03 – after I finished reading this, I suddenly say (internally) ‘because I want my issues dealt with’ .. which seemed as if it were a ‘response’, as if I were being ‘questioned’ as to why I was working with the excercise (though I didn’t actually ‘hear’ any questioning)

I get heavy ‘face tingles’. My face started to feel very different, as if I was becoming more aware of the different parts / aspects of my face that I hadn’t been paying conscious attention to previously.

05 – “processes, trees originated and or” – is the word ‘originated’ meant to be there? I felt like it wasn’t, and as I read the word I see a blue, triangular ‘comedy mask’ with a ‘wicked’ type smile / expression on it’s ‘face’.

06 – at the end of this I see the twin towers falling (yesterday I was seeing the planes hit the buildings, and the people / scenes AFTER the towers had fallen)

Didn’t do Part 2 – might try that tomorrow or sometime soon.

I feel like I managed to connect to quite a lot, but I wasn’t getting much that I could actually share (visuals, words, etc). I do feel better having done this (spent a few hours on it) and I hope it helps contribute to dealing with peoples ‘shit’.

– I did the first one again tonight and I had the experience of that I was carrying everyone’s grief, pain and guilt in my body. It is a very painful experience and I realize that may be why I have issues with swallowing in throat from time to time.

-I feel like I am to carry everyone’s bad and painful emotions for them so they can go to this other VR that was created by someone else. They only let you in if you meet the person that created it’s standards. I also feel other people’s grief in my body because not all of them got in. I asked them why they were filled with grief and they said ” It was because they wanted to go back there, that they didn’t get in.”

-I’m pretty tired of carrying other people’s emotions in my body but it feels like it’s what they want me to do or possibly subconsciously signed up for. (Not conscious though.) I believed they wanted me to come in to their VR but I wasn’t interested because I believe in equality and I also believe in supporting all of humanity to get their needs met and heal and be successful, not just the elite.

-I think they believe I am a part of her soul. They haven’t straight out said it but I think I have heard her go by the name Rose. She seems obsessed with getting her whole soul even if it leaves others without a full soul. She seems to be self-absorbed and can only think about herself. What can you expect what someone tells you that you are a part of the rich elite and that you are superior to other people.

-She also seems to feel very angry about injustices in her life and others. If you make a mistake she wants to punish you, I don’t think she understands or believes in forgiveness for mistakes or failures. Also she makes people feel bad about themselves on the inside for mistakes that happened ages shod

-She wants my soul or at least did in the past. She seems to have let up for a bit as of late but it seems recently I lost some. I have heard her communicate with someone else and he wants to help her to get the rest of her soul for her, and implies mine is part of it.

-It also seems like when I am happy or succeeding she gets jealous of upset and also sometimes has to copy me so she can’t feel good about herself. I am also told I can’t do the things that I enjoy because it’s something she does and she doesn’t want to be copied.

-Also when driving I notice subliminal pictures on the wall and in photos. When I look at a photo of a male a mental picture in my mind triggered a photo of Oprah instead of the male. When I was looking at a cup of coffee a picture of Micheal Jackson appeared. Also I notice subliminal picture in trees while driving. I remember some being a pentagram.

-A flush of old feelings and emotions come up. Memory of feeling guilty that I have food and a place to stay and others don’t. Remember feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders, Everyone’s pain. Wanting to help the world at large, just don’t know how. I’ve later been told you help one person at a time, but I still get concerned about people starving to death in other countries.

-Was in a restaurant and was eating. A really nice African American woman came up to me and paid me some complements. I’m white. Then all of a sudden I have a experience where my mind feels connected to other people’s minds.

-Then I feel like I am connected to the elite. I felt like in some life I was royalty. Then the food tasted really bad and I all of a sudden began smelling this awful smell when I was around this really nice African American woman. It made it really hard to hold a conversation with her. Thoughts and voices were making me feel like I couldn’t associate with them.

-Then when being in touch with that oneness feeling and being connected to royalty I could tell they felt above or superior to them and that they had to be fake and pretend they liked them. I then remembered that on a subconscious level while growing up I always had this bad smell come up when I was around African Americans.

-It’s like the smell was produced to try to keep my subconscious mind from wanting to get close to them. Then I went in the bathroom and it said something about White men which I found to be odd because I just don’t experience that kind of stuff in public anymore. Then it felt like this person said he was going to give the African American woman my soul so she could be white in a next life and he was going to give me her soul so I could be black in my next life because he thought I was a B@&!?. Wondering if they use smell to keep people that would normally love and care about each other apart? Also make people feel sick or feel bad to keep people apart?

Oh, also it seems like some times that I read this it is worded differently, or it had misspelling or the words seemed wrong. Such as more forward. What does that stand for? Move forward? Or does it mean more forward. I’ve never heard those two words phrased that way before.

03: ‘trees AND to to absolutely’ – double ‘to’ – ‘absolutely ANYTHING contributed to’ – perhaps there should be a ‘that/which’ after ‘ANYTHING’ – 04: ‘ANYTHING else using, protecting and or hiding implant, network, system and or anything else’ – The wording here seems a little off and it’s difficult to read.

Perhaps after ‘ANYTHING else’ there could be something like ‘that/which is’

and before ‘implant’ there could be something like ‘absolutely any’ – ‘defining, scheduling and or coordinated delivery’ – should ‘coordinated’ be ‘coordinating’ ? The ‘tense’ changes with that word. – 05: ‘processes, trees originated’ – seems like ‘originated’ shouldn’t be there – ‘by absolutely ANY means absolutely attitudes’ – seems like there should be an ‘any’ before ‘attitudes’ – 06: ‘which in the slightest even contributed’ – ‘even’ seems like it should be ‘ever’ – ‘objectives of absolutely culture’ – perhaps ‘any’ before ‘culture’ – ‘more toward’ – should be ‘move toward’ –

Thanks Trent – it’s edited / updated now – MJ marked ‘more forward’ and I searched the entire page and couldn’t find that (either on the web page or in my original text version!!!) – BIZARRELY the same search functions found it today. A good example of management efforts all on their own.

This is in focus 1 part 04: I have felt the past few times of using this that it doesn’t connect with things. Normally I feel it when it is connecting with things. I feel the energy. I wonder if it means I am done doing these focuses? Also I hear a male voice that seems to be communicating within me telling different aspects of myself not to connect with it. To hide it from you.

I feel controlled by someone. It’s like they are viewing me through a virtual reality lens and getting ideas from it, they are also able to control parts of me, kinda like I am a doll or a video game. I feel parts of my brain responding to them and at times agreeing to them even though I am not consciously in agreement with it.

I hear a male voice who seems to comment on me and my actions and is very critical. He seems to believe women are subservient to men and they should be submissive and not request much and take care of and serve men and clean up after them. They aren’t allowed to have a job or any outside work and the men don’t have to help the women back. He also believes that interracial dating and marriages are wrong. This version of myself that is “submissive” to him believes it is ok for him to treat me this way because he is doing things for me. I guess they believe because they are doing things for me that I don’t have any rights or say in my life.

I believe this person is using their “third eye” to connect to me and get control over me. Also he asks a subconscious aspect of myself if I will carry his weight for him so that she will be attracted to him. It’s felt like I had gained 30 pounds in seconds. I’m not allowed to say no, or set boundaries, or get this person out of my mind or body. It feels like they access me on the inside and outside. There is this pain in my heart area and around it, especially to the right area.

They tell me I have to make amends for this version of me in another dimension that has stolen things for these “beautiful and pretty” versions of me. I guess they don’t have the money to purchase these things honestly so they get her to do it. When I am in stores, especially beauty stores it sometimes feel like there are people there with me who are doing things. When I pick things up there feels like there is this energetic hand. Nothing is happening in my reality on my end but they have said that everyone else lets them do it so why don’t I? If that’s happening first off I don’t think most people are conscious of it.

If I try to say no or set boundaries I end up getting punished. It hasn’t been as bad lately but I realized that I have let go and I can’t control others, only myself. They seem to store the people that are doing this guilt in my body. While I sleep it seems like they communicate with me and tell me that I have to carry the guilt till I die and in the next life I will go back and make amends for what the other version of me did. I don’t want to be a part of it or it happening around me but that doesn’t stop them.

In real life this guy had a crush on me and I didn’t feel the same way back. We had a friendship until he began saying rude things to be and I cut it off. At times his voice would say “you were supposed to be my soulmate.” I didn’t feel it back. You don’t have to be with someone just because they want you.

As I was brushing my teeth it was like they were looking through to me in the mirror and he says “She isn’t as beautiful as you are”. I really wonder if the weight I have been is my true weight or is something they have been doing to try to sabotage my life. Also my face doesn’t look exactly like it used to. It’s much better than what it had been lately but it’s almost as if someone has wanted me to not look good.

It also seems as if friendships and connections have been sabotaged. When I was younger I wondered if there was something wrong with me, for the most part I was nice and friendly but I notice that it seems like behind the scenes they don’t want me to have any friends or loved ones here. They don’t want me to be attractive either.

I was only interested in being friends with this person but it seems like since he couldn’t have me here he has set up a reality where he can be with her. My left foot said in a female voice that she wanted to be with him. She also says she doesn’t want to date black guys, she agrees with him that interatcial dating is wrong. I don’t look at the color but the person. It seems like now I have to date only a black guy. I’m not allowed to date other races.

As I type this they changed the fragrance I was wearing to one that I smelled at the store last week.

I think Samuel communicated that when I worked with him. That Rose and I shared a soul. I feel like I am connecting to all these different people. It feels weird. I felt like I connected to all or a lot of my soul on Saturday. Or at least a big chunk of it. It was silly because I think the main part of the soul is obsessed with asian. I had kinda been obsessed with them too and their culture. She was frustrated that these people in the dining area weren’t Asian. She said they were supposed to be asian instead of white. I’ve mentioned this to someone else but I think if we all were connected to our whole souls then there would be less drama in the world. I felt a lot better. My food that I was eating tasted better. She left pretty quickly though.

It’s not possible to ‘share’ i.e. to have two people with just one subtle form. Subtle forms propagate / divide MOST OF THE TIME much like bacteria, they ‘Split’, these ‘splits’ can be ‘symmetrical’ or ‘asymmetrical’ i.e. they can be exact duplicates of the originating subtle form ‘parent’ (singular) or they can be ‘split’ to each hold different characteristics of the original within each other (this is more common). I’ve about 12 splits / copies, I personally know / have met about 10 of my own splits. So, a ‘shared soul’ basically means you originated from the same soul form that divided to ‘create’ yourself. Rose has 100,000’s of purposely made ‘splits’ often with each made with very different and specific characteristics.

‘Splits’ will very strongly ‘RESONATE’ with each other as they are from the same ‘soul/stock/ancestor’ line. Each split in most cases (unless memory wiped, which is rare) retains the memories and past experience of the entire experience of the originating form they are divided from.

This is one of the seriously ‘weird’ problems the simulation makes a pigs ear of. Because each split has the memories of their entire line / past experience then each split’s simulated experience is started at the start of their scripted experience which means that for Rose, they’ll have been 100,000 versions of ‘her’ in the sim right from when she was first created. For example I know that Rose is aware of having meet 1000’s of versions of herself during her current life here.

The below is from ‘notes’ of when I first became suspicious about these possibilities:

In my late 20’s I met a guy at the university where I worked whom became a good friend. We would wander into each others work rooms and have chats every week or so.

We seemed to have similar interest areas, personality, values (we’d both react to the same things and particularly ‘injustices’) and were both involved in ‘exploring the beyond’ in different ways. Over a few years I personally noticed something quite ‘uncanny’ about ourselves and our experiences. Basically he and I ‘seemed’ to be living parallel lives.

If I got a girl friend and wandered over to chat about this he’d have just got a girlfriend too! If I’d had a difficult argument with my girlfriend he would have had the same happen too. We seemed to be synchronised perfectly, it was uncanny.

The most pointed synchronised event was that one day I smashed my hand into a door so hard that I had to get it bandaged; this is the first and last time I did this. As usual I wandered over to his lab the next day to have a chat about this. As I entered – he looked at my hand then looked at his own in the same state and said

“So, which door did you put your hand through then?”

He had done the same thing as myself, for the same reason on the same day and virtually at the same time.

M.J.March 29, 2016 @ 10:29 am

Interesting. Thanks for clarifying. So what happens if your soul splits and or it has been split off? These people seem to want all of “Rose’s soul”. As I was typing up more of what was happening the name Doran showed up on my screen. I went to google it and I read this:

If you scroll down you will see there is a part that says the Lion and the Rose. This psychopathic psychologist used to call himself the Lion. Samuel told me I used to be a Queen in my past life. It seems like they have came to collect Roses soul and it doesn’t seem like they care how it affects others. What happens if someone else takes that part of the split? Do you die?

I feel voices talking and I heard them say they were going to choke me. I just don’t like the guy or anyone like this. I feel like he has been hacking my accounts and screwing with my friends and connections. People that loved and cared about me. “The message came through that “he is taking it away from me.” I was at a store and no one was paying attention to me. Then a message on Facebook said something about not liking what it’s like being looked over? I don’t emotionally react about this stuff but this must me something that bothers him. Not everybody is going to like you. It happens. You move on. It stings and hurts sometimes. It’s life here on earth. That’s something I learned.

Something just pinched in my back. It felt like something was cut off.

I really wish my soul hadn’t been taken. I don’t have to like him. He has no right to take it. It’s been awful without my soul and the love. I’ve learned to cope but it has been challenging. I’ve learned to go without. It’s like he basically took everything that meant anything to me. To seek revenge.

RoseMarch 30, 2016 @ 4:37 pm

As Clive explained above, people don’t ‘split off’ of someone and it is not as if a soul or person ‘breaks into many pieces’ when they make splits: “It’s not possible to ‘share’ i.e. to have two people with just one subtle form. Subtle forms propagate / divide MOST OF THE TIME much like bacteria..”.

There is a huge difference and it seems as if it is very important for you to understand that difference. ‘Bacteria’ keep making new copies of their cells, so that all new ‘cells’ are a whole ‘cell’, and that is how it is with splits usually as well and with my splits for sure – each split is a whole subtle being/person/spirit/’soul’. And it is not as if I got ‘less and less’ because I made splits. Or as if you would become less if you made splits (which you probably did also).

It also seems (from reading your other comments) as if this whole “other Rose/s” VR universe, which obviously fills a lot and impacts you lots too) could be (used as) a distraction to you, compared to for example finding out more about what you were working on in the research project, Clive mentioned above that you were part of. Same as he found out that Nyssa was and that she is also a split. He wrote about that in a comment reply to Nyssa’s comment further below which begins with “Part One….I connected to what appeared to me a laboratory set of some type…”

——–

I just looked at the ‘Rose and the Lion’ link, and read this:

“The Lion and the Rose” is the second episode of the fourth season of Game of Thrones…..On the beach of Dragonstone, Melisandre presides over a public burning ceremony, setting three people chained to stakes ablaze as an offering to the Lord of Light.”

“Melisandre, often referred to as The Red Woman, is a major character in the second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth seasons. She is a priestess of the Lord of Light and a close advisor to Stannis Baratheon in his campaign to take the Iron Throne, but ultimately abandons him after her actions inadvertently lead to the destruction of his family and army and flees to Castle Black.”http://gameofthrones.wikia.com/wiki/Melisandre

“Melisandre” sounds very similar to Melissa. Maybe it could be interesting for you to check out that series and that character? Maybe it could represent something from your original expereinces?

M.J.March 17, 2016 @ 9:26 pm

Also I feel I have to please this person and others.

They don’t want her to know how they treated me in a past life. It’s like they are not being honest to her.

Also it feels like he has my soul in his heart and his soul is in my heart.

Also there was this person I used to like. And around them it’s like they want me to smell bad to embarrass me or look bad.

I look in the mirror and it’s like my face changes so that “someone won’t see me looking better than they want me to look”.

Parts of me feel like a computer. I’ve noticed lately that things seem like they are missing. That my abilities to do things aren’t as good.

I get the feeling they want me to feel ashamed of my self and feel “bad”.

Also this person feels confident that they “have” me and these focuses will not undo it. I can tell that he got me to believe that I looked more overweight than I really do. He says that he loves me and he did it because he loved me.

He wants me to feel bad about myself but I won’t do that. He may want me to feel like a prisoner but I won’t. I will break free and my life will be great. I will pass through this and overcome these hurdles and obstacles. No one has the right to take over another person and control them.

Also having issues with my phone working right. Issues like copy and paste won’t work. I feel like I am disabled and don’t know how to work things.

It’s as if he has taken parts of my soul to the new version of me that either was created or he created for himself.

Hi Clive, Seems I’m getting icons now – I did this exercise Friday and it kicked off an intense experience that’s still ongoing as I explore the icons being presented to me and their workings / meanings / interactions, and also engage with the security components that are activating as I do so. Among the various icons, I’ve engaged with is the “spinning woman Trent noticed; she seems to be part of the managing components, keeping people ‘on script’ – feels like she’s part of an extensive library of icons I’ve accessed. Some of the icons /images I’m accessing may be different from what’s being rendered symbolically from the ‘interpretation’ interface that you/your outside help are building, since it feels some of what I’m accessing is contained in an existing ‘compendium’.

It also appears I’m interacting with a central VR storyline generator (looks like a field of prisms with a large central prism that generates storylines based on a ‘theme’ from a VR storybook), as well as the extensive compendium mentioned above that seems to include a library of icons, master script, VR master storybooks, emotions & feelings lab, physical and subtle sensory tech, and how these interact. Also I’ve encountered a number of security components including a Sentinel Dragon that seems to gobble up intent, which is a sneaky way to make someone ‘move along’ because it feels like there’s ‘nothing there’ ha.

Sometimes I’ll engage with rendered icons to understand the “feel”/purpose of them or their interactions with other icons; other times I’ll feel myself pulling in massive amounts of data relating to whatever I’m laying my intent upon (ie, how something works, what it means, or how they interact, etc), which seems to be helping me go deeper in these explorations.

The experience has been continuing for days and the comment keeps growing, despite constant revisions. I see you’ve not yet approved my last two comments, and you seem quite busy judging from the four day delay in posting just comments from March 17, so wanted to let you know I’m posting ‘just’ the experience I had with your exercise on Friday. Please let me know if you are interested in reading more details about what I’ve been exploring in the days following working with your exercise.

Here’s a later exploration of the “compendium” that I describe above. — I engage with and move into the Magic Book and it feels like a library of sorts, presented as a series of visual overlays.

I begin to ‘feel’ around and I sense the “statue icon” that Clive posted as applying to Matt, and then many other icons are presented to me. It feels like the complete catalogue of personal icons – mm I think a few are missing but that’s a vague sense – yeah feels like certain ‘special’ icons aren’t here.

Matt’s statue icon is strung to other icons, attached by strings – feels like his ‘personal’ set.

The overlay moves aside it still feels like the library but this time instead of icons, I see papers fly out and organize themselves into a book. Then pieces of the book float out and are distributed among people but I can’t quite feel “who” yet but it’s a large number of people. Like the description of the icons, I don’t want to assume I know “who” this group of people is yet. I get vague connections to “EAAS” though .. this feels like a script to follow?

Feels like the script is a way to string together the action of the personal icons that affect people.

Then the overlay moves aside and I see an elaborate lab set up with tubes and vials. The vials feel like they contain emotions, senses, feelings (which includes the “feeling” of trauma). Tubes snake from the vials through the overlays and it feels like the mixtures deliver the emotional sensations for a person to “experience” the script/personal icon interaction.

The overlay moves aside and I feel “energy” .. this feels like “energetic sensations”?? It’s hard to describe and I’m not sure I’m grasping this yet. Feels like a big cloud that applies sensations to my energy body?

The cloud disappears and my skin now feels filled with a mesh, and the script/personal icons appear. The mesh seems to deliver the bodily sensations to deliver the experience.

— Later, I engage with the Magic Book again, and this time, one book comes off the shelf. It opens to a page that shows a person driving a sword through another person’s belly. I hear “Hari Kari” but this makes no sense since it’s a two person scene .. I look up Hari Kari and indeed, it usually IS a two person act!! The act is one of inflicting fatal self-harm, but the final blow is usually dealt by an assistant to make sure the act is final. http://www.win.net/ratsnest/archive-articles21/fog0000000384.html

However, before learning this, I am puzzled by the “two person image” and as I engage with it, see the second person lift out of the picture, like the parts of the image can be mixed and interchanged. “Number of roles” is the idea I connect to- meaning the act can be played as a “one person act” or a two person act.

I then watch the picture from the book lift out and then be overlaid on the central prism in the Field of Prisms. Inside the prism, I see many versions of the story appear on the numerous screens. Different ways the sword is thrust or struck, different settings and people combinations. Then I see more diverse versions – handguns, nooses, jumping off cliffs / buildings / bridges, smothering a child or elderly person with a pillow.

I watch light beams shoot from the central prism to the smaller prisms. At this point I incur severe security protocols and my head explodes in pain and I can’t engage further with this part.

Friday felt like a setup to push me into doing this exercise. The day was filled with crushing feelings of despair, starting when I awoke with feeling intense self-disgust like something had been working on me all night to ‘program’ me. Throughout the day, I felt more “thought control”-type programming being inserted into my ears at out-of-hearing-frequency range that created intense ear pain and a horrific headache. Pressure in my head felt like management being applied to test various strategies and tech. The extremes pressed me down to feelings of enormous self-hate and disgust, despair, splitting headaches, feelings of wretched worthlessness, and generally wanting to kill myself.

I kept fighting and pushing back; angrily asking and setting my intent to understand “Why was this happening??!!” because this is all a repeat of past traumas/shit I’ve explored. Finally, the sense I got was ‘someone’ (at some point in my scripted experience I gather) was trying to kill me — to see just what it would take to make me kill myself, to see how far they could f*cking push me to make me want to end it all.

So out of desperation (yet also with very deliberate intent to find out what behind the ‘repeat of shit’), I sat down to do this exercise:

——01 I feel deep nausea and ear pain. I feel great anger. I feel I have no control over my life. Can’t escape. “He” is still controlling me. I hate him. (There’s a vague suggestion of a name, but I’m choosing to leave these as ‘generic’ from this point on. As I wrote in last Thursday’s comment, the reasons are unclear as to why I’m getting specific people’s names in these exercises.)

I keep feeling like I’m a remote control person – someone controls my movements, what I sense/feel, what I say, etc. It feels like I’m a puppet, like there’s a wireframe system inside my body that follows and controls my skeletal/muscular structure.

02 “I’m like his trauma bitch. Always doing his work for him. Lazyass bastard.” I am feeling massive hatred for this person (people?) who put me through this.

03 Deep pressure inside my head and back of my throat, that moves to my forehead.

04 “culture specific network” makes me feel a mix of anger/hate/grief “present moment” – I feel trapped and it’s a direct consequence of what was done to me and I can’t escape it.

I begin to feel connections and thoughts related to the above experiences at this point, but then recall Clive’s reply to a comment I’d written in January, stating that much of what I’d described in that comment was about me “engaging with the ‘sim’s’ components” that were affecting me.

So I push through the feelings and thoughts that surfaced here, to see what was “behind” them, and see a coin. Clive just wrote about icons as symbolic translations of components affecting us, so I assume this is one and proceed to engage with it.

From this point forward, it seems I am connecting to a series of icons / images, and the experience is ongoing through to today. I’m not certain I’ve interpreted them “precisely” right, but for each one, I spent time sensing and feeling the nuances of the experiences, cataloging my ‘impressions.’

Coin The coin seems to relate to my ‘hate and anger’ . I see it split into many coins and then recombine, like how a coin symbolizes ‘finite value’ and naturally contains many subsets/combinations of values and denominations. It feels like it’s a measured way to apply hate or anger in ‘doses’. I don’t get angry often, nor do I feel much hate for anyone or anything in my life, so this feels like “hate” or “anger” is metered out in quantified, measured amounts.

Venus Flytrap I then see a Venus flytrap plant, a carnivorous plant that feels like it represents “an anomaly” since its food source is different from other plants. For optimum health, it needs meat like an animal does, so it’s like a cross-over/combination plant. This feels related to how I’m ‘different’ from others, or seem to have combinations of qualities like being ‘both’ creative and analytical. I then watch the Venus flytrap snap at an insect that goes by and I feel sadness and grief; it feels like it represents how I keep unexpectedly losing friends in my life as I’m inexplicably separated from them. It feels “dangerous” too, an aberration? The name “Venus” feels significant too: I’ve made connections in prior exercises to being forced to be a planetary goddess, and had felt tech was installed in me that collected planetary resident’s sexual energies to be siphoned off for use by some other entity or purpose.

Cut Down Life I see sharply pointed mountain peaks and at first it feels that they represent “seeing things in the distance”. I then see a hot air balloon passing over them, and it catches and pops – the mountains are fake, and placed quite near to me, designed to look ‘real’ and ‘far away’. They seem placed there to fool me into feeling I am in a much larger space than I am. Then I see hundreds of hot air balloons rise up, obscuring the mountains – again, it looks like an expansive field of giant balloons, yet when I watch them rise up, they stop at a ceiling. One floats close to me and I see it’s a miniature balloon. Again, it’s all trickery to fool me into feeling I have more space than I do; I am in a very tiny box.

This feels related to the cut-down aspects of this place – how we’re given only tiny amounts of what we ‘should’ be able to experience.

Cobra I watch a Cobra with its hood extended. The Cobra icon is feeling like programming to achieve some cultural goal / to perform a cultural role. This took awhile to ‘get’ though.

When I first began engaging with it, it felt like fear – fear of the unknown and the known. There’s lore that cobras can be charmed, and I feel a lot of doubt about whether to trust the myth or not. Venom can be useful for therapeutic purposes, and snake charmers were originally healers, so I feel great indecision about what to do with this cobra. It feels like it represents forcing me to face my fears to become a healer. This strikes me as odd because I don’t feel like a healer, not in terms of how ‘healers’ act or operate here at least.

Later, I recalled the Nāga, the snake gods from Indian religions. Scanning through a list of notable snake gods, Manasa feels resonant with what I’ve been experiencing. She is worshipped “for the prevention and cure of snakebite and also for fertility and prosperity. Manasa is the sister of Vasuki, king of Nāgas (snakes)” (quote from link above),

As I contemplated Manasa, I began to sense components or ‘something’ in my head (my head felt ‘bigger’ than my skull) and involuntarily began trying to look for them. But seeing inside ones head is ‘impossible’ so the search had me moving my head back and forth, around and around, (moving in a ‘cobra dance’ manner haha!).

Searching for that “something” in my head finally led me to sense the underlying ‘cultural roles/goals programming’ related to Cobra icon.

One Ring to Rule Them All As I move through section 06, I see a ring rotating in front of me and hear “One Ring to Rule Them All” and then “Ultimate Kwisatz Haderach”. This feels like it somehow represents the programming to execute the plans to bring some culture’s world domination plan to fruition, such as the “One Ring” designed to rule all the other Rings and thus the world, as described in the Lord of the Rings books, or the Bene Gesserit (of Dune) endpoint goal of the Ultimate Kwisatz Haderach, which united the Thinking Machines and Humans for so-called “peace” (the KH still represents “someone’s agenda”, though, which is why I deem it merely “so-called” peace.)

“Magic” Book??? In section 07, I see a book that opens and sheets of paper fly out and enter everyone’s head on an entire planet. It’s a master script and each person gets a piece of the master script. I hear “magic book”, which doesn’t seem to apply to what I see happening.

Later edit: Feels like this book contains an extensive library of icons, scripts (used as narrative to ‘apply’ the icons), information on laboratory setups that administer “emotions/feelings of trauma/etc”, information on technology that delivers energetic and physical sensations (both the emotion labs and the sensation tech seem to be relating to “experiencing” the scripts), storybooks of some type that are used to generate VR storylines, etc., plus it feels it contains how it all interacts.

The vast quantities of data in this book/icon have felt overwhelming and I don’t yet feel I’m getting full/unimpeded access to the information it represents. I’m sensing via my interaction with the contents of this book that lots of stuff is still blocked, so my descriptions in this comment are merely “first impressions” at the moment.

Today when I engage with the book, I’m getting the sense of accessing and analyzing massive amounts of data, rather than the much slower process of exploring rendered icons.

Shifting Tables I see two tables side by side, moving back and forth, feeling like they present “the other side of the story” or maybe re-telling a story by casting hero as villain, and the villain as hero. Also, it’s a feeling of “nothing stays still”. Each table is always moving and being moved away from me, so I can’t sit and ‘use’ the tables for their intended purposes; I feel “the tables can’t be trusted”.

Later edit: I sense the idea of “can’t be trusted” is somehow applied via programming. As I was editing this section, my ears hurt which engages me with the Programming Robot icon (looks like a robot with Shrek ears; feels related to programming inserted via ears). I then see the Programming Robot overlay on the Shifting Tables and hear “Don’t trust them; they can’t be trusted,” so it feels like the Programming Robot uses an awareness of “both sides of the story” or hero-villain inversions, and turns that into a debilitation?

These are interesting icons — I especially found the ‘mountain’ / hot air balloons interesting, also as an ‘extended’ metaphor for being confined in a small space.

Also as ‘food for thought’ the ‘weather balloon’ image is used in the Wizard of Oz and was also recently used in some other things I saw which I’ve forgotten.

This ‘unusual’ means of travel and surveying/ observing feels to me as representative itself.

So in fact I think what you’re describing here is an entire icon ‘suite’ within the holo space which possibly relates to personal ‘frame of reference’ and ‘viewpoint’ in lots of ways. It could be about your life, it could be about your involvement in the EAAS project, etc…

Ahhh as I think back to it they had some kind of ‘standing’ corridor using mirrors which created a sense of vertigo. Here is an ‘immersive human size kaleidoscope’ which is personally ‘unsettling’ for me:

— My own personal script and trauma variations including: ‘spying’ (EAAS project and other areas), so that would fit with this ‘peephole’ on a smaller model, also ‘Dioramas’. Hahah in 7th grade I made a Diorama of a scene from the Lord of the Rings so it’s funny you mention the LOTR reference.

And then VR testing which includes ‘shifting reality’ contexts which remind me of the kaleidoscope where things are refracted and you can’t find the ‘source’ of the original image. (Lots of metaphorical possibilities here).

Thanks. The exercise excerpt you posted was useful – when I read it, it connected me to an ocean that seems to represent “the subconscious”, and I’ve been reconnecting to the Subconscious Ocean for a while now as I’ve been exploring various programming affecting me – when my ears scream in ultrasonic pain, I often see the Programming Robot icon floating in the Ocean, and sometimes hear very faintly in my inner hearing, various programming phrases such as “You’re worthless. Kill yourself” or “You can’t do it. You’ll fail. Kill yourself now.”, which is accompanied by inner panic, terror, feelings of worthlessness, etc. So it appears programming was applied to my subconscious. (What I don’t understand yet is why I would have been subjected to such extreme programming – the stuff I hear and have experienced is beyond diabolical.)

Re the kaleidoscope – I’d seen the reflected image several times (“real / not real”, or perhaps “not real/not real”, and the real is hidden). It seemed to be a security device to keep the true source hidden / make it difficult to engage with the real thing. I posted somewhere here regarding a reflected jellyfish that seems to protect components, and also a reflected evil face that seemed to use emotions and fear as security devices.

The peephole you post above looks like funhouse mirrors to me – I’ve seen something that works like funhouse mirrors applied to certain groups of people and it creates chaos and misunderstandings. (It may not be represented as a “funhouse mirror icon” though, so I’m just describing the attributes). It may work in conjunction with other mechanisms to place people into roles / standins relative to others, but I don’t know that or if so, exactly how.

Anyway, the “funhouse mirror effect” seems to accentuate certain attributes or actions of a person way out of proportion to make other people perceive certain things about another person that could be completely wrong but that ‘fits’ a destructive role in the other person’s script, causing harm to both parties. I’ve been massively misunderstood and subsequently deeply traumatized in certain groups in ways that felt out of context and made no sense. When I later investigated the group interactions, I saw the members stretched and squeezed in the “funhouse mirror” manner to distort people’s views of the other to maximize conflict.

Keep in mind, my experience could be drawn from the other VR simulations I was apparently involved in or my own scripted research or experience, so this could be scripted data I’m sharing not relating to Clive’s work here.

This seems like an interesting metaphor for describing the way the drone and subtle shit as well as software uses the presentation of the subconscious. New subtle beings don’t have a ‘subconscious,’ it’s a drone construct and they use subconscious influencing and sleep/ dream programming to ‘create’ and ‘build’ one over time.

So maybe currents / waves and tides with the ‘surface’ of the water being impacted by the deeper currents or ‘contours’ of the ocean floor?

So this is a bit maybe like the ocean filling with water and then it seems this is ‘used’ as the basis for reprogramming people (or it is among the things that it can be).

I guess if you expand the metaphor oceans could also represent trauma as well more generally because it works by aversion and by making people ‘directed’ by what they averse to and have been ‘impacted by’ but won’t acknowledge or can’t face (and are made to be that way by all the shit).

I wonder about the ‘ocean’ ideas as possibly representing the collective unconscious. They also have the phrase / concept of ‘collective unconscious’ which I feel must be standards that are implemented to have most of the population accumulate many of the same basic pyschoses or tendencies. Rose did a lot of work going through ‘dysfunctions,’ looking at ‘collective dysfunctions’ at societal and population levels and asking hard questions about all this and finding that often many people had the same ‘basic priming’ responses that were driven by trauma.

So trauma in being hidden / opaque and being like a rudder that is used to manage people but under the boat. And also you have to use the tides and currents to get anywhere. So it’s like our entire population is maybe floating (even drowning in?) this subconscious / not acknowledged ‘ocean’.

Also the ocean represents the ‘subtle’ spaces here so as we’re polluting and spoiling our oceans / killing off the ocean environments at an arguably worse/ faster rate than our ‘land’ environments / habitats then this could really become a complex metaphor!! Almost an ‘icon suite’ or a ‘suite of metaphors’ to describe different processes?

# Trauma # Subconscious # Reprogramming # The subtle (which is the environment where all this is REALLY going on but everyone is being conned/ oriented away from it and toward the physical). So they are ‘floating’ on the top of the ocean of subconscious and subtle managing/ influencing ‘shit’ all of which uses trauma which is out of sight / out of mind.

And then I almost see the waves/ currents and tides as ‘networks’ and more specific management and ‘updates’ to the population.

I’m really amazing how many variants / variations there seem to be for pushing people toward suicide or similar type things. Also the ‘I’m worthless, I’ve totally failed’. And ‘kill me’ / ‘delete me now’ / I don’t want to exist.

Ahh!! I just found these as representing ‘defenses’ / ‘defensive’ AIs when I was hacking with Tom yesterday and trying to access my energy body in specific ways. It feels like this is some kind of (relatively) ‘default’ response/ representation by the software which I could imagine the teams have ‘translated’ as a jellyfish.

(It also felt like a jellyfish/ octopus to me, but I think it was the sense of something with ‘tentacles’ coming to ‘grab’ you and hold you in place or block you. I believe we’ve found octopus/ squid like things, and the ‘shooting ink’ as a smokescreen would seem to represent attempts by the software to misdirect/ camouflaging too.)

— RE:Funhouse mirrors

I was thinking here that what you describe with the ‘funhouse mirrors’ will be heavily applied to shared space / VR research spaces. This can / has caused huge amounts of very strong conflict:

Anyway, the “funhouse mirror effect” seems to accentuate certain attributes or actions of a person way out of proportion to make other people perceive certain things about another person that could be completely wrong but that ‘fits’ a destructive role in the other person’s script, causing harm to both parties. I’ve been massively misunderstood and subsequently deeply traumatized in certain groups in ways that felt out of context and made no sense. When I later investigated the group interactions, I saw the members stretched and squeezed in the “funhouse mirror” manner to distort people’s views of the other to maximize conflict. AND interestingly I actually got some nasty ‘management’ / put off effects while thinking about writing/ responding to the ‘funhouse mirrors’ in your comment. So it feels like something that is able to use past shared space research is still ‘alive and kicking’ or activated by this.

I think the teams are getting a handle on it now as it was so bad for some minutes that I had to hold of continuing writing the comment and was strongly pushed ‘not to post the comment’ and fed things like: ’your comment is total shit’ ‘STOP WRITING NOW.’ ‘You’re just going to MAKE THE CONFLICT WORSE.’

So this would point to sophisticated, intelligent and adaptive psychological manipulation because it can ‘assess’ that your comment is about conflict and that me just writing what I found (so no real ‘basis’ for conflict) is made to seem as if it is ‘hugely provoking’ conflict here and now. So it’s almost as if I feel like I’m being ‘beaten back and forth’ by some unseen ‘conflict’ that is occurring in a shared space and so am made to be paranoid and think that ‘I’ll mess everything up’ by trying to comment. So not only is it trying to put me off and shut me down but it’s actually ‘calculating’ and planning on ‘permanently’ having me averse to responding to this topic or commenting to you. So very integrated / sophisticated, long range planning type management it feels like. — In thinking about ‘icons’ in general lately: I am very happy overall with the way the teams seem to be presenting icons lately. It feels to me that you should be able to continue to get icons and may even find icons which underlie other icons. Hopefully not too many at this point though.

If there are too many you get overwhelmed and sabotaged, so this is why I think the teams must be getting a handle on these and even ‘filtering’ them to present the most ‘salient’/ useful icons to people. So choosing ‘judiciously’ to present people with say 3 – 5 icons that are ‘meaningful’ and relatively easy to understand and engage with.

One of the difficulties/ frustrations we encountered when we first started hacking the sim project was that you’d get icon and icon and it’d be hard to get to the ‘pith’ / core of what the icons meant. And also there were loads of false icons. AND on top of this, to make matters worse / add insult to injury, the icons themselves even when accurate were often still ‘noddy’ because they were INTENTIONALLY WRITTEN TO BE THAT WAY. So they’d be ‘nasty’ management shit applied to people with a ‘nice,’ whitewashed, obscuring or misdirecting icon that was intended to sound ‘neutral’ and not make people think to hard about it.

I can’t remember some of the ‘worse’ ones, but I do remember for example there was one called a ‘washing machine,’ which basically had you feeling like you are being tumbled in a washer and dryer (NOT A PLEASANT FEELING AT ALL). But it was ‘much worse’ than this and also psychological and I can even remember the ‘sensation’ in the gut of my stomach.

So really this icon would be like a ‘variety’ of psychological torture, which many of these things often are. So a washing machine is relatively neutral, but then imagine something like ‘A still pond’ being used as an ICON for some form of extremely strong and debilitating management.

NyssaApril 15, 2016 @ 3:34 pm

Really interesting stuff Matt .. RE: the ocean .. I’ve interacted with another Ocean that seems to contain suppressed trauma/emotions and related memories (my working title is “Ocean of Hurt” because of how it felt to me). As I noted in my comment to Clive when I posted the above exercise notes, I’d continued to explore the icons and experiences for many days after what I wrote above. I’ve posted some of those notes here for you to read.

re: Collective Unconsciousness: I’ve had a lot of explorations regarding what seems to be versions of “shared consciousness” that feels like it relates to these collective ‘consensus reality’ experiences we have.

Others have talked about the ‘inner’ experience of these shared consciousness experiences, and it feels I somehow had periods of being ‘awake’ in the “matrix pod people”-like setups that facilitated ‘dream realities’. Thus it feels I’ve watched and explored the goings on of the environments, exploring the tech contained in the various versions of connective/conductive material that the bodies are enmeshed in to facilitate the shared consciousness, etc.(and tried to escape haha). I’ve experienced the connective/conductive material as a vertical plane that people are half-immersed on their back side, and reminds me of the New Age idea that the back-side chakras are related to the “not yet manifested”. Some of the versions of this conductive material feel very fluid, which reminds me of the ocean analogies / symbolism you wrote about.

Perhaps there’s a shared unconsciousness that works in conjunction with the shared consciousness.

NyssaApril 15, 2016 @ 3:28 pm

Here are the notes from the “extended sessions” I experienced the weekend of March 19 of working with the icons I began to be presented with in this exercise.

——- During some difficult moments, I set my intent to understand what was influencing me, and the following icons/images were presented to me:

Field of Prisms I see a very large prism, shaped like an elongated diamond, slowly rotating. Then I see a massive field of additional smaller prisms stretching out from it in all directions. Above the field of prisms I see a shimmery ceiling of some sort and can see tech or components through the watery view of the ceiling. Shimmery watery walls appear on both sides. An object appears from one wall and moves across the field of view – like a droplet of water forming out of the watery wall and “falling” to the other side, except it moves sideways, wall to wall. Sometimes one will come from the ceiling, then make a 90 degree turn and move to a wall; other times, the drop from the ceiling will fall to the floor and I see it spread, which feels like a systemic ‘effect’ to influence all the crystals? (The nature / purpose of the ‘drops’ is still unclear to me)

I move inside the large central prism and it feels like or is somehow relating to a Master AI. Inside the prism I see screens upon screens of video or images, and feels relates to VRs. It feels that the prism seems to generate stories, like a story generator for VR experiences.

Later edit: I’ve been interacting with the Field of Prisms to explore how it works. For instance, I saw a storybook (the storybook was contained in the “Magic Book” – see note here for an exploration of the “Magic Book”) page move to the large central prism, and saw various VR storylines appear on the screens.

I see a music note floating above each small prism. The music note feels like it has multiple purposes / represents a wide range of protocols, like music is used as a data tag or a version control, music allows the VR programming to be triggered later with a song .. (hahah As I access a music note icon to get more of the nuances of what it’s symbolizing, I’m suddenly in a vast room — haha this feels like the Music Department!! Music therapy, sound design, resonance implants and stuff with gongs/cymbals ..)

Wall of Containment and Ocean of Hurt I feel tremendous deep, raw hurt and pain, similar to what I’ve been experiencing and describing with these exercises. I am standing beside what looks like a giant ocean that looks like the wall of water that formed when Moses parted the Red Sea. The ocean contains my hurt, my pain, my anger – it’s huge. It feels like an Ocean of Hurt (after awhile I sensed it could contain many things beyond “hurt” for other people so maybe there are variations of this icon or maybe it needs a different name), being held back by a containing wall; I am not allowed to feel these feelings. These two icons may be the same thing but the more I feel into them the more variation and nuances I’m sensing so am separating them for now.

This icon makes sense to my life experience because I’m not easily angered (seems all I have access to is a “coin’s worth of anger” that I frugally spend like the Coin icon illustrated). I don’t “feel hurt” easily and I am steady, strong and patient often well beyond other people’s tolerance levels. I am generally willing to continue to engage with difficult situations or people, or people whom have dealt with me cruelly or unfairly. It’s like having a very high pain tolerance level.

It’s only been this past year or so of trauma work (a portion of which I’ve been describing in these comments) that I’ve finally been able to begin acknowledging, expressing, and dealing with the pains and hurts and wounds of my life.

This ocean .. oh this how ocean HURTS. It’s a raw deep wounded hurt that makes me feel like my chest has been ripped open, like my heart was ripped out and acid poured on it. There’s anger here too – the anger of betrayals of trust and broken promises. Of being hurt by the very people who should protect me. The wounds of helping people and of being decent with them, and being repaid with cruelty or abandonment. It feels it contains the pain I felt here (second half of comment), which felt like the worlds’ greatest heartbreak, raw and mind-numbingly consuming.

(note: Reading through my old comments I’m seeing the correlation between the icons I’m seeing now and the deeply painful emotional stuff I’ve been engaging with for months.)

April 15 edit: I read an excerpt of the “what defines me” exercise (from Rose’s commenthere), and the Ocean of Hurt appears again as I experience great anguish, grief, and distress. This time, it feels like this ocean contains suppressed memories as well.

Interaction of Shifting Tables and Ocean of Hurt At this point of writing this comment, I sense the Ocean of Hurt and the Shifting Tables working together. I can often ‘justify’ the other person’s hurtful treatment of me because I can see their side of the story, their view or perspective (the Shifting Tables icon). I “get” why they did what they did and thus I don’t hold ill will towards them for their treatment of me.

But the painful emotion is still somehow created, and then it feels like ‘something’ uses this mental understanding of their version of events to move the pain of the hurtful interaction into the Ocean of Hurt instead of allowing me to feel it and deal with it properly.

Cloaked Figure (Security?) After writing the above paragraph, I attempted to engage with how / why I can’t address the ‘interactions’ themselves, as in “what prevents me from being able to “talk it out” with people from whom I feel hurt in certain circumstances so we can better understand what happened / express any pain either of us felt / resolve our differences / prevent the circumstance from happening again, etc.” I see a cloaked figure (fairly sure it’s the security component like Trent saw). I try to move past him, and there’s dozens of cloaked figures now. I keep engaging with this thought and I hear “You’re not allowed to access this information now. Try again later.”

I try again and the back of my neck feels pressured and energized (which feels like a security protocol activated), and my ears are filled with piercing pain. The “programming” I persistently feel in my ears constantly these days just got ramped up to an even higher level. The back of my throat feels that same ‘full/pressured’ feeling, like I felt yesterday. I try again to understand what’s preventing me from being able “talk it out” with certain people, and now my brain feels thick and slow, like my head is filled with a dense foam and I can’t sense even the interworkings between the Ocean of Hurt / Shifting Tables any longer.

Later, a different difficult experience presents itself, and I again try to engage with what’s causing it. I am again presented by the Cloaked Figure. A second attempt to engage results in many Cloaked Figures appearing. Within a few moments, I begin to feel a similar physical experience I describe in the paragraph above. It feels like I keep activating security protocols.

Finger Wagging Person ?? I am preparing to post this comment and I hear “Don’t post this.” I ask “why not??” and set my intent to see what’s causing this and I see an image of a person wagging a finger in front of my face.

This seems to be an advisory icon? I’m bothered by it (no one likes a finger wagging in her face!) so I try to find what this is connected to.

3D Circuitry I see behind the Finger Wagging Person what looks like a vast circuit board; I use my intent to continue to engage with the scene and see faint circuitry through my field of vision, vast walls of components and tech. In the center of the scene, I see faint wires tracing throughout that look like faint 3D circuitry or a schematic of sorts. I feel I can access this – float through it and explore because I sense there’s much, much more, but my body is reacting violently – nausea in my heart/chest, the back of my neck is squeezed and painful. I begin to experience a similar yet more intense version of the body shutdown I had with the Cloaked Figure security activation.. mm yeah now I see the Cloaked Figure again and my body feels like it’s in lockdown. I don’t understand what this circuitry /schematic? image ‘is’ yet.

— I prepare again to post the comment, but somehow can’t even access the soul-healer.com website. More images are then presented to me over the course of the evening.

Hari-Kari I feel intense anguish and despair, and see an image of self-immolation – a person with a sword driving through his/her belly. I make connections to suicide, self-termination, self-destruct. This icon feels related to various VR reprogramming scenarios I was put through, and have engaged with over the past six months. A number of VR reprogramming scenarios I was put through in the original space pushed me repeatedly to “fatal self-harm” or “self-termination”. The process of exploring these traumas was very, very, VERY intense and extremely scary, but I’m still here ha… and probably a stronger person because of it.

Later edit – I saw this image again in a master storybook labeled as “Hari Kari”, and I noticed the storybook image applied to the Field of Prisms to generate storylines. More info on the Hari Kari master story book experience is here.

Programming Robot My ears feel the “ultrasonic ear piercing pain”, intensely so. I engage with the feeling, and see a comical robot head with devices sticking out on each side like ears (kind of like Shrek ears). This seems to be some type of mind-control / programming input. I’ve been experiencing this ear piercing pain for awhile now. It’s excruciating, I feel tremendous pressure in my ears and head, and I can vaguely sense commands, data, or “emotional states” being transmitted at ultra-sonic levels.

Note: Later, I experienced a terrible pain on the crown of my head, and, engaging with the sensation, saw a similar robot icon, but with a skullcap, so I call this one the “Skullcap Programming Robot” ha. This suggests there’s a suite of programming robot-type icons.

Interaction of Hari-Kari icon and Programming Robot icon I feel the Hari-Kari icon anguish again and angrily ask “why am I experiencing this AGAIN???!!” Then I see the Programming Robot icon overlay the Hari-Kari icon, and it seems like I’m being shown how the Programming Robot icon can work in conjunction with the Hari-Kari icon to cause me to act in a certain way. In other words, it seems the programming through my ears could be used to trigger me to commit suicide / self-termination. Feels like the Programming Robot icon could be used to influence a wide range of VR reprogramming-driven actions.

— Security icons present themselves as I try again to engage with the 3D Circuitry. I first see the Cloaked Figure but move past him.

Sentinel Dragon This security icon seems to be a second line of defense after the Cloaked Figure, and feels like a guardian or sentinel of some sort. It looks somewhat like this image here. I watch it for a while and it feels like it ‘gobbles up intent’ to prevent me from connecting to what it protects. I don’t feel the physical effects that the Cloaked Figure creates, so it has a stealth factor to it – I can send my intent out but my intent just “disappears” and I don’t feel “security lockdown effects” in my body. This would make a person feel like there’s “nothing to connect to” to encourage them to move on.

I’ve experienced a “dead zone” feeling before when trying to connect to certain things that I feel strongly should have been there. Recalling those experiences, my inner screen is now filled with Sentinel Dragons.

Trauma Trigger I try to move past the Sentinel Dragon, and I’m slammed with trauma feelings in my chest and head and hear “Trauma Trigger”. This repeats as I keep trying to move past the Sentinel Dragon, taking different forms of feelings- sacral nausea, solar plexus pain, grief etc. My body feels like it’s getting beaten up by itself.

I see an image of a lever switch being thrown. This feels like a third line of defense.

Trauma Port I notice that the trauma I’m getting punched with doesn’t seem to be mine. I set my intent to see what’s causing it, and see a port or tunnel coming out from my chest.

I feel others’ trauma regularly, presented as from very specific people, so I engage with the thought of “why do I feel trauma from other people”.

I experience a sharp stab of trauma in my heart that made me cry out in anguish, a feeling presented as being “from someone else” – someone whom I know. I saw a port or tunnel of some sort leading out from my chest and away from my body.

A few moments later, I felt painful sacral trauma from the same person, filled with painful emotions and energetic sensations, and see another port leading out from my sacral region away from my body.

This person is all about his work, like a machine, and feels he doesn’t have time to deal with people socially. I think he only interacts with a maximum of 2-3 people regularly (all male) and ignores just about everyone else, or worse, tells them to go away because he’s “too busy”.

I’ve been processing his love and relationship emotions and trauma on his behalf regularly for months now. For example, I’ve processed his trauma around feelings of regret, sorrow, and remorse regarding interactions where he did not act compassionately or decently. He seems completely separated from these feelings, since his behavior has not changed and he has not sought reconciliation with those affected by his behavior.

I’ve felt his love, attraction, and longing as well and even felt what feels like orgasms occasionally when an overload of sexual or heart energies are ported to me. (He has had love trauma – his wife left him unexpectedly for another man years ago). He doesn’t seem bothered by the lack of a love relationship in his life so I suppose moving those positive feelings through the port to me may facilitate him “not being bothered”? It feels strongly like he has no awareness of this happening or that these feelings belong to him.

Later edit: I’ve been engaging with the Trauma Port, feeling more and more data come in regarding it. Today I’m no longer feeling any emotions or trauma presented as from this particular person; instead I’m hearing the song Breakeven, by the band called “The Script”, being presented to me as applying to this man’s situation. The lyrics are about a man whose wife/girlfriend who left him for another man, and she is exceedingly happy with her new love, while the man is heartbroken over her leaving him, which fairly well describes the love trauma of the person I’ve been writing here about. So this feels like the “music” that’s tagged to this particular love trauma he was subjected to. I keep sensing that the music tag may relate to “VR version control” for the version of VR programmings that are copied into scripts.

__ April 15 edit – I’m noticing that it took me almost a month to post this comment, and reading through it, I recall how many obstacles and security defenses activated to prevent me from posting it last month.

I engage with this circumstance, and I see an electric eel swimming in an ocean – the eel feels like a security defense to protect “dangerous’ information, and I’m getting that it had to be disabled prior to posting the comment to be sure the message could go through

RoseApril 15, 2016 @ 5:14 pm

I have a thing with ‘names’ and often track down things, when I look up people’s names. And because I thought there were so many ‘nature/plant names’ among the people who write comments here (and I was in a lot of ‘plant resonance’ stuff and ‘tree’ and ‘nature world/spirit’ related things right then, three weeks ago, I think), I looked up some of the names of people here. And also yours, which I didn’t know until I looked it up, is also a tree name and genus (of the Tupelo tree). I hope you don’t find it ‘boundary breaching’, I just always look for ‘connections’ and things that might ‘open more things’.

And your ‘ocean’ theme fits very well with a mythical nymph called ‘Nyssa’ being an ocean nymph and giving name to a whole branch of ocean and water nymphs – nature spirits – and thus a presentation of subtle forms (nymphs are also very independent and strong women I found out):

“THE NYSIADES were, three, five or six Okeanid nymphs of the mythical Mount Nysa. Zeus entrusted the infant god Dionysos to their care who they raised with the assistance of the old satyr-god Seilenos. When the god was grown they joined his company as the first of the Bakkhantes. Terpander of Lesbos says Nyssa was the nurse of Dionysos.”

THE OKEANIDES (or Oceanides) were three thousand goddess Nymphs who presided over the sources of earth’s fresh-water, ranging from rainclouds to subterranean springs and fountains. Their numbers included the Nephelai (Cloud-Nymphs), Aurai (Breeze-Nymphs), Naiades (Spring and Fountain Nymphs), Leimonides (Pasture Nymphs), and Anthousai (Flower Nymphs). They were all daughters of the great, earth-encircling, fresh-water stream Okeanos and his wife Tethys.”http://www.theoi.com/Nymphe/Okeanides.html

Melissa, who also writes here, is also a plant name and genus and also is the name of a mythical nymph figure who’s name is used about a whole group/kind of nymphs, the Melissae. And the mythical Melissa is one of the nymphs who protects and nurtures Zeus.

Which sounds very ‘mission like’ – for both of them – to ‘protect and nurture gods’ (‘gods’ translated to ‘important people’, there is no such thins as ‘real gods’, it’s just ‘roles’ and missions) also described like this:

“Nymphs, such as Melissa, played an important role in mythic accounts of the origin of basic institutions and skills, as in the training of the culture heroes Dionysos and Aristaeus or the civilizing behaviours taught by the bee nymph”.

And I felt it could maybe relate to you both and be simulation translated ‘versions’ of soul purposes or missions. As subtle beings, set up to ‘raise, nurture, protect, teach’ etc, ‘cultural heroes’……

Maybe you can use it…..

————

I have had the things you describe with processing or being in other people’s ‘subconscious’ issues, feelings etc, including their sexual and love stuff, which at times was seriously extreme and bizarre. but also a lot of other feelings, like their suppressed anger (and what they were angry about) etc. Which I have tried at times to talk with those specific people about, and some of them were open to it and agreed it had to be theirs’, but mostly it made people upset or angry with me (whihc I can sort of understand , it must sound weird and boundary breaching if others suddenly claim to ‘feel your feelings’, especially if it is about things that aren’t conscious for yourself or you have tried to deny or suppress.

And I know one guy who has had it with me at times, not knowing whether it was my or his own feelings he was feeling (and we got very ‘mixed’ also, I had lots of his stuff running in my system too. But we could at least talk about it, or some of it).

MattMarch 25, 2016 @ 8:09 pm

Ah, Nyssa, I’d been thinking about snakes and healing and ‘snake charmers’.

Clive and we have noticed/ found there to be some seriously ‘piss take’ translations and representations of different areas here. I wouldn’t be surprised if what you describe here is right in some ways:

When I first began engaging with it, it felt like fear – fear of the unknown and the known. There’s lore that cobras can be charmed, and I feel a lot of doubt about whether to trust the myth or not. Venom can be useful for therapeutic purposes, and snake charmers were originally healers, so I feel great indecision about what to do with this cobra. It feels like it represents forcing me to face my fears to become a healer. This strikes me as odd because I don’t feel like a healer, not in terms of how ‘healers’ act or operate here at least.

Later, I recalled the Nāga, the snake gods from Indian religions. Scanning through a list of notable snake gods, Manasa feels resonant with what I’ve been experiencing. She is worshipped “for the prevention and cure of snakebite and also for fertility and prosperity. Manasa is the sister of Vasuki, king of Nāgas (snakes)” (quote from link above)

Haha especially this:

Venom can be useful for therapeutic purposes, and snake charmers were originally healers

Knowing how big of ‘bastards’ those responsible for the rescripting and ‘re writing’ of reality itself are, I would not be surprised at all if this ‘snake/ venom’ thing is actually something around healing which has been totally inverted here is a complete mockery/ farce/ piss take!!!

And then you have things like venom is used for healing or antivenom (I think??). I have heard in desert areas of the Middle East, if you cut off a Scorpion tail and keep it and apply it to a new bite it is an ‘antidote’ or ‘anti poison’.

So that also seems like a weird feature of reality in general in the original MV even e.g. ‘what is healing?’ and then an already confusing/ ‘inconsistent’ reality context in the original MV has been totally put into a blender here.

(D) – From Subconscious & Subliminal contributions: analysing, evaluating, selecting, scheduling and or delivering to myself absolutely anything that directly or indirectly contributes to absolutely anything that would EVER influence myself subliminally or sub-consciously and or which would ever impact myself subconsciously or subliminally or below the threshold level of my conscious awareness or perceptions

Felt like I was being presented with an analogy of some type regarding the programming templates. I felt something like a cookie cutter that creates the outline of a person, and in a somewhat “jig saw puzzle”-like fashion, this outline is fitted “in relation to” other people’s templates, to create a community (not always ‘fitted’ next to each other – some were holding hands, etc., but each person has a role or position). The feeling was along the lines of using an inventory of ‘what makes a community/organization/team’, creating roles /duties, then deciding on how they work in relation to each other, then placing everyone in a various starting places with a goal of shaping them to fit their assigned roles. Feels like certain parts of ourselves are “taken to extremes” for the purpose of making sure there’s ‘enough’ of that attribute of ourselves to fill the outline, or to ensure the right percentage of that attribute of ourselves, in relation to other attributes, is included. It feels like the excess outside the outline is then cut off/allowed to die/atrophy, etc., which feels disorienting and traumatic as we are denied parts of ourselves. (It somewhat reminds me of the ghost pain that amputees can experience, and in fact I did connect to an image of a person whose arm has been removed so the person has to ‘rely’ on others in the community for certain things.)

I sensed there’s both an external shaping of the outline /outer capabilities / external experience / external environment, plus inner programming designed to help a person “play his or her role better” (via VR or other types of programming). For instance, felt like a person could be shaped and molded the way a Russian gymnast is shaped from a very young age to “Win the Olympic Gold”. Her outer environment is constructed around “being a gold medal gymnast” (lives in a dormitory, visits gym daily, eats for athletic-oriented nutrition, her schedule revolves around training, socializes with gymnasts etc) to the intense training she receives which shapes her body, to the inner mental conditioning she’s put through (being taught she’s a winning gymnast, that she’s meant to win, that the country depends on her). If she doesn’t believe herself to “be” a gymnast, then she won’t do as well, so the inner experience (aka her mindset) is as important as the environment she’s in and the training she receives.

The Russian gymnast conditioning feels like it represents a controlled experiment rather than the complexities of human and community dynamics, but it generally conveys the idea of “outer and inner shaping” that I’m connecting to.

It felt like there’s a progression or series of templates that slowly moves people into these ‘roles’ and ‘being in relation to’ others, somewhat similar to how a person using ‘Invisilign braces’ has a series of clear ‘teeth templates’ that slowly shift the teeth from the current configuration to a ‘perfectly straight’ alignment.

The second half of the exercise had me connecting to security defenses, including Cloaked Figures (which have an intense body/mental lock down feel to me) and Sentinel Dragons (the “intention gobblers”) again. Also a Crocodile, which lies in wait, and a Clamshell, which is like a double satellite dish that beams back at the person (aka, me, in this instance). Feels like the Clamshell scrambles my resonance, giving me a feeling of confusion/disruption. I hear the phrase “resonance disruption” and “resonance disruption field” now. Also I connected again to Trauma Triggers, which always seem to punch me with other people’s trauma. I’ve connected to a “Trauma Port” when I first engaged with the Trauma Trigger defense. The Trauma Ports seem to port other people’s trauma to me, so it feels like the Trauma Trigger defense somehow uses trauma from this port to punch me with other people’s trauma to distract me / debilitate me / keep me from proceeding. Maybe it also punches with my own trauma, and that I’m only ‘noticing’ it when I get punched with trauma from others. The Trauma Trigger feels like getting beaten up emotionally on the inside.

I have yet to figure out what the Crocodile is – it didn’t appear to have any overt impact on me. However, I’ve heard that crocodiles are held in reverence in certain cultures as the guardian of hidden wisdom, as described on this shamanic website here.

— When I was about to hit “submit” to post the comment, I had the thought / ‘was advised’ to not post this yet, “because Clive has not been active on the site for a while / he’s busy etc.”

So I asked what was giving me that thought / advice, and set my intent to engage with “everything trying to prevent me from posting this comment” and then “what security protocols have activated or are affecting me now” and “what’s keeping me from understanding any security protocols that have or are or will activate” etc.

I was hit with a strong reaction at that point, and felt like I was pulling in massive amounts of data, a sensation that increased as I spread my intent out to include many other aspects of engaging with and understanding security defenses that were working on me (how they work, what triggers them, how to disable them, how they interrelate and connect, etc etc). The download was intense, but at the end I had what looked like another periodic table like I had with the avatars, with about two dozen security icons visible, with a large proportion of the table still empty.

At this point, I sensed that the “Crocodile” defense “diverts a person’s intent” and I watched the crocodile appear above the ‘surface’, grab the intent, swim below the surface and attach it to something else. mm so it feels like it connects a person’s intent to the wrong thing. (This is hinting that there’s a whole category of ‘intent’- oriented defenses, which would include the Sentinel Dragon, which seems to ‘gobble’ intent… interestingly the Sentinel Dragon has a bit of a crocodile ‘feel’ to it as well.)

I also now sense that the Trauma Port likely isn’t ‘directly’ related to the Trauma Trigger – it pulls in trauma as needed (to manage a person / for some effect / etc.), and the Trauma Trigger more likely uses any trauma it can get its grimy hands on to punch me with. (Like right now as I type this paragraph, I’m getting punched with another person’s trauma and it hurts like Hades.)

Everything is all very vague and low res .. more like ‘impression’ level of detail… nuances or specifics are merely ‘felt’ or ‘suggestive’ for now.

— Post Script – I delayed once again to post this comment, and as I went about my morning activities, the excruciating ear pain I’ve been experiencing regularly became even more painful. As I noted in my last couple comments, I’ve interpreted / experienced this ear pain as some type of programming and have also seen it represented as a “Programming Robot” icon, applying programming to another icon.

I laid my attention on the pain, and felt connections to the idea of this programming I’ve sensing is in relation to the Programming Template. Then I heard “programming template applied” as I felt into that sense.

I also felt some explorations relating to the Trauma Port, exploring a “Trauma Shunt” that seems to divert some of the trauma that is ported to me via the Trauma Port, to be saved in my subtle body for a later time?

I’m not sure what this all ‘relates’ to beyond my own experience, since apparently I have been involved in non-EAAS simulation stuff, and frankly can’t recall much regarding EAAS at all. But I’m sharing here in the event it’s helpful or interesting.

01: feelings of control to the finest degree, I see mechanical tech influencing my every move, connecting back to the switch board, more access to the switch board is granted, somehow the ”security’; has been lightened, each switch connects to a different aspect of myself, as well as a drone that controls it, Diversion is the goal, whatever needs to be done to divert me from accessing my original script and data sets is done.. This is not truly possible, but the AI still tries, It seems every time a security breach is reached in accessing new levels of my issues, there is a new set of tech or “diversion design” used to cover more ground. As we get closer to breaking security measures, the drone shit destroys what it is I am about to uncover into millions of pieces, locked in a type of mechanical quarantine and then a new set of devices are used to lock that into place. This is reflected in millions of ways. The sensation and image I see is billions of cages inside of cages inside of cages, each one needing the perfect set of passwords like a rubix cube to unlock.. I feel what is the point to accessing the switch board, when it is not what now controls me, it is now something else… Well the last thing that was destroyed or abandoned in terms of the sims control mechanisms towards this all, is the clue. Looking at what was “”unlocked”” although now not holding power is the hint or key to find the progression of how it took place to then lead into its new set of “”locked information””. This puts into view ”what one is up against” with the continuous streams of control that are constantly modified to that person, with more and more sophisticated means being put into place the more the person may ”bypass” the diversions.

02: When reading into the word trees, I sees streams of data interconnected certain people together. This is another diversion method, altho rudimentary, still traumatizing.. It seems as more bypasses or successful hacking accomplishments are made to re routing diversion and tactics, an automatic configuration places groups of people together designed to reinforce all the diversions, even if these people do not personally know each other, as if others problems are leaked into ones own script to then make that person literally become ‘other people’ or as if they are now multiple people, this usually is a somewhat sneaky method of diversion as the people getting this level of “”tree shit”” do not notice they are actually connected to people they have never met as they act as if that person is, not noticing a change. This is another “change the script” method, that weaves people together to then add more problems or ‘fake solutions’ into peoples lives.

Predictability is a theme reoccurring in this exercise as if the sim predicts everyones moves to then modify an outcome for that person or culture with that knowledge, making people think changes are actually occurring “naturally”.. rather I see a room of script writers who are continuously redoing everyones script to create the highest possible controlled outcome for motives that always theme as suppression and or making them believe in anything. Believing in anything is buying the script that has been laid out to you by the writers who are all just different versions of drones wanting to modify your experience to eaas aims which are often masked as positive.

03: Much of the reasons it seems much of the shit issues haven’t been totally removed is that they are operating in such a way that if they were all removed at once I would cease to exist as they are interwoven into all of my scripts, data, pieces invisible avatars, and codes in a way that was done at my initial “copied” entrance into this simulated reality throughout all ‘times’, as if my subtle formed was immediately tagged and hijacked (initially subtly) as it appeared in the sim at the start of this whole thing, and so removing all issues that rooted from that moment requires deeper levels of investigations as “blank spots” in the records are still being sought out for to completely understand the full picture. Torture and all of the diversions methods listed here towards myself are not even a hair of what was truly done in the sabotage and programming method that have been used on everyone since the original “big bang computer boot up”.

04: Multiple walls of cubbies office buildings stacked on for what looks like to forever organizing data sets to stop me from accessing the possible direct identification of everything in the exercise.

05: Rewards in belief, specific outcomes will come into ones life, usually more “positive” when one accepts the pre defined sim outcome of any particular life event, the reverse holds true for those that do not accept the sims outcomes (meaning everything). It becomes apparent how much more controlling light types of beliefs are that are imparted onto peoples beings, it is the ‘dark ones’ usually that have rejected or refused the influence of the inheriting controlling nature of the sim or “”SOURCE CODE”” which inherently is the force that controls no matter what form or positive or negative outcome it will fuel. In this sense ” going with the flow ” is pretty much like giving yourself over to the sim as everything that happens to everyone at every moment is controlled to manipulate the person completely– the more you believe that is not true- the more that is especially true for you. The sim is doing its shit job when people think they actually have power as ‘creator beings’ to change this. Absolutely everything that a person can do to outsmart the sim will result in more refined control methods to which the person is oblivious (being obviously is apart of every script, and when a person isn’t oblivious or aware of being oblivious, that is apart of the script as well) ‘spirituality’ is the easiest thing they through on people as a diversion method. For myself this has been revealed right now as every religion or any and all beliefs imparted on myself from the original ‘source’ of my copy here. BECAUSE LIVING INSIDE THIS COMPUTER GENERATED REALITY THAT WE ARE ALL IN IS JUST SOOOO SPIRITUAL! The balance of good and bad, or positive things in a souls existence and negative things that have happened are just the toggle or manipulated play that the sim and drones use to find how to manipulate people the easiest, fastest way, and to avoid suspicions, changes happen to add depth to the experiences which all are fake. If anyone thinks this reality is good, well thats what the person you were simulating felt, check again cause this is way worse than the worst shit hole ever created. And yes especially true for “”enlightened”” areas of this simulated universe, those are the most controlled. I see multiple crosses and religious symbols being identified as control devices in myself and others through this understudying.

a) It relies on no one knowing about ‘itself’ or of anyone being able to track, identify and limit it’s sabotaging strategies . . . b) Boy oh boy is it getting desperate, it’s on the ropes that’s for certain else it wouldn’t have helped / had you to write such a good paragraph to try and get us demoralized . . .

In the last few weeks (just as a test, after getting rid of the ‘super front defense management shit’ over a month back) I wrote some new ‘basic’ simulation evidence pages – just pointing out very simple and deeper ‘fundamental’ evidence chains. These are 10x better than anything else I’ve written . . . this last management set is wired into and embedded within all lines of ‘everything’ that define ourselves (as you describe in 3), which is hilarious really because ‘hacking’ the management now reveals more of ‘everything’ that we then understand more of, while making edits and changes (it facilitates to get it all revealed even faster).

It wasn’t a correction or a complaint Mo just an observation that your comment strongly suggests that we have the managing / what defines us software very ‘worried’ for it to use such tactics.

KarenApril 21, 2016 @ 3:45 am

Hi I am new to this site today! I have not done the exercises yet however I have been reading peoples responses and experiences….

I thought i would share with you all what is going on in my world before doing the exercises. I have seen the vision of a conversation before I came to this world between myself and beings(people whomever) I could not see they proposed my life to be a misery the whole way, including all of my family and their families to come. I disagreed and walked out refusing to take this on. i was called back they offered me another deal. Where the first part of my life was challenging and then it would be easier however they could not guarantee any other health issues etc…. I disagreed to this as well. I then negotiated that they give me prior warning in the second part of my life if something wasn’t quite right in advance so that I had time to act on it. And also to guide me with the tools I need to deal with it.

Now I have got the MS under control and I have finished the breast cancer treatment. A week and a half ago I was given the vision of something being implanted into me that would create another cancer.

Today I am guided to this page. So with everything I have been using protection, protection never works for me, I always get derailed with psychic attack – energetic stuff. When I go to create a business or do something for myself I get sick or energetically/emotionally etc something happens.

Today reading the comments it dawned on me that its not the people on earth attacking me it something else just letting me take one step forward and then like being programmed it sends a surge of energetic derailment in whatever format to keep me at bay.

This is the first time I experienced some being getting angry…then further into the focus, I got impressions that all this is all a very intricate conspiracy theory and I/all am/are being duped. Heehee. Further impression: I have opened a can of worms.

I did the first Healing Exercise focus (and others, including the passive focus) for 2-3 days to engage with my writing implant, which I felt contributed to the “story-like” tone of the initially unedited underwater festival comment.

I could read the focus from start to end, but I would often end up with dizziness, to the point of crashing and sleeping for at least an hour (or more). The dizziness stopped only when I gave in to mental distractions and diverting activities that unconsciously use up a lot of time.

After doing the focus, I tried to recall what I really felt and experienced while writing about the festival comment. However, my mind locked up and/or became blank. Several times I observed myself being oriented towards my mind and away from my feelings, emotions, and sensations. I kept getting various explanations for what happened.

Whenever I re-read the unedited version of that comment, I experienced a sense of disconnection. The style and tone of the distracting details sounded like mine, yet I couldn’t comprehend how or why I ended up writing them.

I only remembered the following during the messed up writing process: mental pressure, extremely strong resistance and dizziness while analysing my notes, confusion, inability to distinguish (much less delete) distracting details from the relevant ones, “fake” happy mood, and a very strong push to post the comment immediately. Mentally, I could not get out of that “story mode.” I was locked into a mindset where I interpreted, framed, and/or strung together a series of situations, coincidences, or events into stories.

Eventually I remembered feeling disturbed when I noticed that most of the dances featured at least one dancer holding a statue of the Christ Child or Virgin Mary. But I had forgotten about that feeling. Or rather, it had been overlaid with the “happy” feelings caused by listening to the festival music.

I began to suspect (rightly or wrongly) that the writing implant was Christian technology and that the implant could hijack me. I did the avatar hijack focus, which connected me to instances where other beings channelled information through me so I could relay them to my group. While in this mode, I’d be conscious of writing or speaking something. But once the channelling stopped, I’d have no memory of how I came up with what I had just written or spoken. Thinking more critically about how I really received the info or what I was really channelling resulted in mind blank.

—————

I started writing this last April 20 (with great difficulty) but managed to finish it just now. I kept doubting what I had written. I could not decide whether to post this or not until today. On one particular night, I kept writing, analysing, and editing this draft even though I was very sleepy and tired because of some compulsion pushing me to keep going until I was done writing and posting “something important.” When the same compulsion triggered the next night, I had to make a conscious decision to sleep and go over the draft the next day.

I can’t find your underwater festival comment now. But this article is an interesting and very direct representation of an underwater culture:

“Deep in the island archipelagos on the Andaman Sea, and along the west coast of Thailand live small tribes called the Moken people, also known as sea-nomads. Their children spend much of their day in the sea, diving for food. They are uniquely adapted to this job – because they can see underwater. And it turns out that with a little practice, their unique vision might be accessible to any young person.”

Clive – is it possible to expand the ‘search’ function on this site, to also include searching in the comments (and not only the articles you have written)? It is very difficult to find (anything in) comments that aren’t in the last 50 comments list, and I have searched in many individual pages before and also now, trying to find Nina’s comment. So it would be great if that could be made possible!

This was my experience on Friday, April 22; only got through sections 1-5:

“any of my experiences ever” I feel there is so much missing. I feel influenced by the “absence” of things, script, experiences. Flat and dead space extends all around me. This is hard to describe – like most of my life and what this phrase is supposed to be targeting is missing – like trying to push air, walk on nothing, push against a void.

“anything because I’m reading this focus now “ – pressure and wiggly feeling in left frontal lobe (location of “secret files”) again. Ears keep screaming in pain and the air conditioner is extremely loud.

last half an hour – I see a crucifix with a shawl draped on it. In prior attempts of exploring what’s affecting me, and using bits of this exercise, I’ve been seeing this symbolic icon often – sometimes with a shawl, other times without, and feel it relates to the Christian VR. I’ve been feeling thick and energetically suffocated in this phase of Christian VR trauma exploration. Something about the Christian stuff is thick and feels like it ‘plugs every pore in my energy body’ in a sense.

“last 4 hours” – I again feel more left lobe pressure and a crushing feeling on skull and temples. I choose to remotely engage with security that’s containing me, and it feels like my entire skull is being crushed in as I keep trying. I feel under attack and filled with grief. Life is so hard for me these days and my senses feel under deadlock. I’m feeling dead inside, plugged and mired in grief and layers of emotional thick muck.

“last day” – I see double wedding rings, an icon that feels it represents relationships and marriage. My husband and I feel both at the lowest point ever in our lives as we feel pressed on all sides, and “hope” feels out of reach. Yet we feel more unified and supportive of one another in these dark days as we encourage each other to have hope.

Later edit: In the days since doing the exercise, I thought more deeply about the ‘unifying’ experience this tough time in our lives has been for us, as we both feel broken down and in need of each other. It strikes me that this may be part of the Christian idea of “two shall become one flesh” concepts behind Christian-based marriage. So while I’m grateful we have each other for support right now, on a more fundamental level, this ‘merging’ feels at odds with what I believe should be our true state- that each of us is a sovereign independent full-power, whole soul that shouldn’t ‘need’ another person. It feels like we’re both being ‘weakened’ so we will “bond” with each other, in line with the bible’s concept of marriage: “…and the two shall become one”.

02 “..define or influence absolutely anything of any moment experience that I ever had or am having now..” Feelings of grief arise but this feels like a security defense in this case, so I choose to not let them get in the way of engaging with this exercise. I stifle my sobs and continue.

I pause on the phrase “anything else” and “specific aimed for outcome” and I can feel my eyes searching database files like a hard drive head – it’s not a ‘processing’ feeling, it’s a searching function.

At the phrase, “any others”, my eyes move to the ‘secret files’ location of my frontal left lobe.

“to directly or indirectly support .. any cultures current or long term objectives priorities or strategic outcomes” My head tilts to the right so my left eye / left frontal lobe is raised. My eyes are again brought to the location that I experience as my frontal left lobe and I feel my eye is technology that allows me to view remotely. The feeling of my left front head is dense and full – it feels somewhat like a massive data flow – there’s so much there I can’t distinguish the flow but it feels like a cache overflow in a way – where it’s overloaded and I have to wait a while until it resolves.

Over time, I notice my left ‘tech” eye is viewing something – a file room. I hear “head pin” and “kingpin” and “Muad’Dib secret files”. I wrote about this , the “Kingpin File Room,” here. Now I have a piercing pain in the front left lobe and the thick feeling is starting to loosen up, but now feels like my skull is trying to expand in this region, giving me a very disorienting pain.

03 I feel completely blocked and feeling thick in the first part of this section, so I begin to engage with security that was blocking me. My inner screen filled with sentinel dragons, eels, and other security icons, but they were all close up, not distant, and it feels like they were working on/attacking/locking down ‘me’, not on what I’m trying to connect to with this exercise. I see big gaping mouths swallowing my intent and a sea of various security components encircling me.

Then something changes. The data searching stops and through my left ‘tech’ eye, I see what looks vaguely like a vast complex circuit board, and hear “security central control board”.

I start the section again, and feel washes of painful emotions come over me but suppress them again and move on, and now I see a landscape with three crosses on hill, and hear “Christian VR”. As I finish this section, I watch in my left tech/remote viewing eye, as the landscape image is chopped into tiny bits and put into a cannon or dispenser of some sort and spews out like a machine gun into the distance.

On the surface this feels like script bits being dispensed to influence ‘everything’ in line with the christian ideology. For example a heavy christian influence is easily observable in the West, even in people/organizations that are not christian at all. But when I try to go deeper into what this scene represents, I get a disorienting feeling. My left tech eye sees the Caduceus-type icon again and this time the center post seems more like a cross, and my throat feels constricted. It feels like a security device is in my throat to silence me. I try to engage with any security related to silencing me, my thoughts get slow and I cough and gag.

04 This section seems to target security stuff in general, and after I read the first section, my eyes search databases while I feel various security protocols similar to the ones which I’ve been encountering in these explorations (emotions, programming, the security pain in my throat, external noise and distractions) being activated. It feels like a quick run through of previously engaged security and none are onerous or difficult.

Then the security exploration experience moves on and concentrates on my third eye. I’m reminded of the connections I’d felt to the Illuminati relating to the Third Eye in this comment here. I recalled that in that exercise, I’d specifically felt like the third eye has surveillance capabilities.

— I have to stop for several hours at this point, and in the break period, I severely bump my left forehead (the location of the “secret files” and the subject of these explorations it seems) extremely hard. The impact makes me dizzy and feel my body react with symptoms of nausea and shock. I hear the phrase, “memory loss”, and feel like it’s a representative experience.

05 A few hours later I start back with this section and it feels heavy and thick, and I can feel trauma and emotions beginning to build in my body. These don’t feel like mine – it’s trauma from another person – so I begin to engage with the trauma port or anything else using any methods or techniques trying to keep me from connecting to what I’m trying to engage with here. As I do so, my chest caves in and my tongue gags in the back of my mouth. When I add in “anything keeping me from remembering” my speech slows down, I feel nauseous and begin to gag heavily.

I smell rancid feces at this moment and look down to see my dog has vomited next to me, and it’s likely his own feces that he’s eaten and vomited back up. WTF. I’m reminded of the “human centipede on a leash” icon I’d posted about here and my nausea is almost uncontrollable at this point. I sense a connection between my dog’s action and what I’d just tried to do to reclaim my memory – perhaps a certain type of security defense to keep me contained and away from ‘dangerous’ information? – but I’m too weak to explore it further.

I function well enough to get the mess cleaned up but for hours afterwards I feel under extreme attack and complete shutdown. My entire body feels nauseous- my back and chest and throat, so it can better be described as an “energetic nausea” more than a physical G/I tract type of nausea. The feeling is one of complete powerlessness and a sapping of will or control.

The next couple days I felt under attack, like I was being broken down at a fundamental level.

It feels like “something” really doesn’t want me to engage with the information contained in the frontal left lobe/”secret files” location.

Hi Nyssa, this was during the shit being ‘aggressive’ time/phase (22nd April) because it was getting backed into a corner – hence the over the top dog throwing up put off’s, it’s been settling down over the last 2/3 days as we’ve disabled this ‘variation’ of the software’s ‘maintain and or lock personal shit’ approaches.

Alright, I did these a while back. I said I was going to post it, but then decided not to because I was/am going through a bit of a reorientation phase I guess you could say, so I thought I was just getting garbage from slogging through all the crap I’m trying to understand/deal with, but then changed my mind and decided to post it anyway. I did these over the course of several days back in April.

01 – Not much resistance. A few stray thoughts here and there, mostly distracting. I realize that even the things I like are likely distracting/very detrimental to myself, so I must let these go and be open and honest with myself.

02 – “…and of any AI.” – I remember an experience I had a while back. I got into the whole ‘New Age/Spirituality’ scene through something called Spirit Keeping (this website, http://spiritkeeping.net/, provides some insight into what it is, but just googling it will bring up several other sites on the topic.) I had a spirit in my ‘keep’ by the name of ‘Trey.’ who was bound to a quartz pendant (the lady i purchased him from said he had been watching over me throughout my life and that we had shared many lifetimes together.) I’ve long since left the ‘spirit keeping’ scene behind me, but suddenly, while sitting in my room one evening, thoughts of Trey suddenly crossed my mind and not too long after that I heard an owl hooting outside my window with the impression of, ‘I’ll be watching over you.’

“…ANY trauma, love, hate…” – ‘Good is bad. Bad is good.’ I’ve been struggling for a while now trying to come to terms with and understand what love is and this made me realize how we as a society, and more importantly myself, seem to have idealized and idolized ‘love’ as some sacred thing by placing it on a pedestal and worshiping it while hatred is shunned and stomped on and misunderstood.

“Any script parts, scripted trauma.” – I suddenly remember reading a passage out of Marianne Williamson’s book, “A Return to Love.” The author was talking about how, in one point of her life, she said God had this specific job or purpose for her in life and how she went into this meditative trance where she received a vision of cherubs carrying a scroll with the words, ‘You’re a spoiled brat.’ on it.

03 – Read through a couple times. On the second to third time, frustrations over writing fanfiction and trying to creatively express myself through writing, as well as organizing and writing such work, came to the surface. A few tears over the pain, frustration and loneliness of being unable to express a lot of things with my mother, who believes that stuffing down your emotions, “is the better part of valor.’

04 – Nothing

05 – “And or newsworthy events” – Brought up thoughts of a petition I thought of starting to get a certain concert series I have been following to perform where I live. As of right now, I have yet to start it.

06 – First time through, nothing. Second time through about half way through I felt something on the upper right side of my face, kind of like how your skin feels when it turns to gooseflesh in the cold. Third time through I think of a few of the people in my life and how WSW, particularly Clive’s Automated Healing service, could help them in more ways then the therapy they talk about going through. I think of how Clive’s knowledge and services could help everyone here (if only the sim designers would friggin’ allow it.) But I also wonder how much those I care for would change if they did do the automated healing (part of my mind says a lot.) That they wouldn’t be or act the way they are now, that there would be a loss, and those I care for would become angry with me for even suggesting it in the first place afterwards.

“…Interaction definer…” – This triggered memories of how I would go to great lengths to please others just to be a part of the group, just to be accepted by others.

“…cultures and or nations…” – I’ve had a few moments in my life where I wanted to be President of the United States. Especially during my ‘new age’ stint where I had a lot of thoughts about the United States and the government, the Founding Fathers and the Constitution (“We the People…” was a big thing that came up.) A lot of my thoughts were focused upon fixing the current mess the country is in and what it would take to make it great again.

07 – The words, “…Any specialist grouping…” kind of caught me off guard. Towards the end of the exercise I started seeing ‘spots” in my vision. One in particular was about the size of a pea just off to the center of my vision and purplish blue in color. It kind of reminded me of the shiny foil used on rare Pokemon cards. I tried to directly look at it, but it would disappear when I tried to directly look at it, and would reappear when I refocused on the sentence I was reading.

Hi, I just completed exercise 1 and during it I experienced some eye strain, itchiness and some difficulty getting the words out as I read it aloud. Other than that there was no sensing of beings or issues or experiences during the session. However afterwards I got a headache that intensified running from temple to temple and my eyes remained sore. After reading I got up took the trash out of which I noticed a sense of freedom come over me. My chest felt open and somewhat puffed as I walked back into my house. It feels like my heart chakra is fully open and radiating all around my torso. I also noticed while walking around the house that certain house furnishings made me feel that I or the person who gave me the item was programmed. I intuitively knew how controlled my life and everything in it has been. By doing this exercise it gave me freedom by showing me how I have been trapped and not really in charge of my experiences. Interesting. I’m going to do it again in a few days. More things might surface.

Hi Clive, thanks for your guidance. I did #8 but not much happened other than I became extremely exhausted. I did redo exercise 1 right after #8 and found that I had to push through the exercise and not give into the fatigue. I felt like I was fighting something. Thoughts of ” you can come back to it later ” rang in my head repeatedly. As I neared the end of the exercise I had a vision of an alien in a room sitting at a control panel operating dozens of switches and sliding buttons. It was controlling me subtly but profoundly. It was doing its job of manipulating me on all levels and I felt like a puppet on a string. I’ve heard of the matrix and how aliens (the archons) are stealing our energy to power themselves through implants and various other manipulation techniques via dependency on concepts and belief systems thus controlling us by using selected human hybrids to spread certain seeds of beliefs that keep us in bondage. I’m sure there’s much more to it than this. My understanding is limited still.

The more I entertain these ideas the more I’m guided to information that supports them. It’s pretty clear to me that we’re living in a Truman Show concept except I’m not sure if there are any real Trumans in our show. Everyone appears scripted. I’m going to keep doing these exercises.

01- “…part of the aversion or attraction process and particularly as part of moving me towards or away from absolutely anything.” – I am reminded that I am a copy and suddenly get a sky-high view of myself walking down the street while this ‘higher’ world-viewing being can push and pull me wherever it wants, kind of like a puppet, but more like how commercials entice you to buy their product.

02 – “…and or any others because of me…” – I’m reminded of my own aspirations and desires to be a leader, to build something great and wonderful and beautiful that makes others proud of me (read: worship me) and makes like good and wonderful for everyone. Thinking on my thoughts and ambitions, I am reminded of the Harkonnens from ‘Dune’ and question what my intentions ultimately point to. The term ‘puppet fool’ comes to mind afterwards.

03 – I observe my own attitude and behavior when it comes to doing these exercises and it seems that I’m in more of a fighting/defensive/flight mind-set (which is how I’ve handled a lot of stuff in my life) when it comes to reading about and discussing what these exercises are about rather than being openly curious about what these things are. This is improving, but I fear grief over how messed up everything is.

I did this exercise a few weekends ago, right after I got back from visiting my mother.

01 – I connect to thoughts of the Amateur Radio Club that I have been talking to and their pushiness and expectation of me to get my Ham Radio Operators License and I realize that a lot of my efforts to be apart of the group or connect with others have been attempts at finding my family (a while back, I had a thought/realization that my family isn’t my real family) or at least a place where I belong. I realize that a lot of the things that I have been interested in, in the past (TV, video games, etc.) have been replacement for human interaction (I’ve often felt like an outcast or an outsider growing up, still do.) Part of me wants to enjoy the company of others, yet is afraid to be wrong, hurt or rejected. I believe I should be happy and able to live life on my own. (Maybe I should re-examine this belief) Yet, I feel so lonely and want the attention of others. I am crying as I write all this.

02 – Nothing

03 – I to memories of my mother and the conversation she and I had this past weekend. She and I have been talking about the issues going on between us and things have gotten much better. I find it funny that when I suddenly realize something my mom and I need to talk about, I find myself making impromptu trips out to see her.

04 – Nothing

05, 06, 07 – I think of the hitchhiker I suddenly picked up going back home, and consequently dropped off at a bus station and purchased a ticket home for. The way I met up with her was just too suspicious. I was heading east on the interstate and coming up on her walking in the same direction she had no shoes and no water. By the time I got turned around and traveling west to go find her again, she had crossed the median and was walking on the side of the interstate I was traveling on. Talking to her, I found out she was one of those ultra-religious/spiritual types with a super long title for herself that I can’t remember, but she believed Jesus was the Messiah. Thinking on this, I can’t help feeling that she wasn’t some kind of attack against me. I start crying after this thinking about how I’m a data file of someone else’s life, and how no matter what I do here, that in the end it doesn’t matter.

Hi Megan, the new page that will be posted in the next few days explains why some family members and even entire families just ‘aren’t’ whom you expect / don’t feel right. It also explains why some people feel they are the wrong gender!!!

01 – I started with just this one. While reading, I had a few sharp pains throughout my body. When I finished reading, I was light headed and had a slight headache. I feel a bit of a brain fog. Then I had a thought that hopefully this experience will result in me having much better relationships with others, especially of the opposite sex (intimate relationships).

The feedback I am getting is a bit disjointed and does not always come to me immediately during an exercise. I feel a continued nudge to dig into the rituals of religions trying to control people. 1. Reverted back to feeling like I am invisible – but mainly to close family and friends. Complete strangers spot me out from across a parking lot and make an effort to say hi. 2. I connect to a fat, white, friendly looking clown holding 2 bouquets of balloons. As a child I remember seeing clowns at fairs offering balloons from bouquets, and I wondered how all of those children could just pull a string and get a balloon without the entire bunch letting loose or getting more tangled. The clown could also set down each bouquet on a hook and it would hold together. I think about the tangled wool balls that Clive describes in his progress report. 3. I am inside a lavish house with many rooms full of different VR environments in each room (jungle, palace, ocean, city, etc.). As I start to have fun exploring a room – a painter guy in a white jumpsuit enters the room, and starts to paint it / white wash it away. I am frustrated and move to the next room. The painter follows me and starts to white wash the next room. He is irritating me and I rush faster to get into the next room, and he paints faster as well – with an attitude of “sorry – but this is my job”. 4. Now I am in a house with a new family that has a lot of pets – but the most mutated animals that don’t exist in this world (half skunk/ half pig, half dog/half dinosaur, a walking puffer fish with 4 legs, and humans with heads at both ends of their body). I find this repulsive but am lucid enough to remind myself that this may be because I am used to the fact that these creatures do not exist in my current world. A voice tells me it is my job to feed these animals – which I try to do but they all try to bite me as I feed them (and I don’t understand why they are biting me if I am trying to help them) A large hand gives me 5 spherical balls, about 3 inches in diameter and told me to give them to the dinosaur/dog – I thought this was odd as it did not look like food. 5. While shopping in a warehouse food center, with a huge 30-foot celling, I am talking to a stranger about a few items. A bug drops down from the ceiling, and the bug now hovers exactly equidistance between the two of us. We look at each other and say “that is weird”. Almost at the same time we look into each other’s eyes and telepathically say “this could never happen in a real world”.

this focus got somethings’ attention. felt really weird for an hour or so. spaced out and dissociated from body on day one. pressure in my head originating on the right side and spreading + symptoms above on day 2.

Hi, I did the exercise and the only image that came into my mind was a large military ship, in the middle of nowhere in a dark ocean that gave me the creeps. It came accompanied by feelings of hopelessness like “you will always be used” type of suggestions… Military ships anyone? Does this say something to you guys or it was just my imagination?

Part 1 – A memory of the first meeting between me and an ex from 20 years ago. He had a huge positive and negative effect on me for the next decade. Seeing the scene from over my own shoulder. No thought in my head to go up to him. It feels contrived and “directed” – manipulated, from this perspective.

Part 2 – A strong flash (suddenly knowing) of the idea that there are not actually 7+ million “people” here. Many are just fake – characters in the background like we see in a movie with an extremely simple script, no human or spirit home inside. The feeling is more like thousands? 100,000? And all of them are not in individual bodies, some are sharing. 3-4 “people” in one body, but not usually at the same time. Also when you are operating in the world outside of the normal people and situations you would be in who you are interacting with somehow acts like “tagging” them in…the connection activates them to be “here” in the world and interact. This connects for me personally to the feeling of “disconnect” I feel and so many others are struggling with today. It also connects to figuring out real quick when you are talking to a background type human and the interactions are limited and not real and getting frustrated with no (or not many) “real” people to interact with in my local area.

BTW- my first comment, I’m a lurker who has done a lot of the focuses. I came today because I was feeling very stuck and unable to get anything done at all in my life this week.

Hi Kree, well, it’s 7 ‘billion’ (not million) and none are fake (although some are duplicates of the same person to provide more opportunities to F**K them over faster) so your ‘view/experience’ of people being fake would suggest that you’re simulating someone that spent a fair amount of spent in a VR where many of the other people presented within the VR were ‘fake’ so you have the ‘same’ experience presented here likely because this will keep you disengaged from others/maybe cause you to not interact with some people and or not take them seriously i.e. it’s being used to debilitate/’contain’ you here!!!

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Clive December 7, 2018 at 4:24 pm on What are Dark Forces & Demons & Why are they Against the Light?Hi Jessica, yea, if you've' a decent scale of 'education/interests' there are clues to all sorts of our duplicated population's simulation here reinforcing sub agenda's/objectives with respect to specific peoples/groups/sub groups that also go way, way back in earth 'history'