According to the Bible, the man has all the authority in the home (1 Tim. 3:4) but who gets custody after a divorce?

According to Scripture, only the husband is allowed to initiate a divorce. In Deut. 24:1 it says he gives her a writ of divorcement and sends her out of the home. This is where we get the “put away” from Matt. 19:9. But, do the kids leave with her?

The answer is “no”.

Since the man puts the woman out of the home for breaking her covenant vow, he sends her out of the home with nothing. No kids, no furniture, no money (unless a dowry was discussed) but only a suitcase. The children stay with him. The woman went back home to live with her father in shame.

But what about America and other Western cultures? In Jewish marriages, the man paid a bride price for her. She was considered acquired by the husband. In almost all cultures that practice bride price this is the same from them. However, being in a “bilateral” culture where women are allowed to divorce the legal system looks at everything equally. Scripture does not support this. The man has rule over his wife and children regardless of the culture due to the punishment of the woman (Gen. 3:16).

Even if she did nothing wrong, or was wronged herself she does not get the children.

The problem with our culture is we allow bilateral marriages that practice bilateral divorces. This is unscriptural, unbiblical, and simply illogical. This is why so many men can’t handle a divorce where the kids are taken from them by the US Government. This is simply, unnatural and not according to God’s law. God assigns custody, not man.

There was a time when all men kept their children (back in the 1800’s and before) simply because they were the only ones who were looked at as being able to provide for them but now things are different. Educated women initiate 90% of all divorces in America, AND as long as they continue to get the children and child support there is really nothing preventing these statistics from changing.

In conclusion: Regardless of what others may say, know this, men – your children are your children as long as you were married. And unless you give your children away for adoption, sign away 50% custody or sign any other stipulation the Government can not take away your God-given authority over your children.

I would always recommend sharing your children with your spouse, but Scripture is clear, in a divorce or separation the decision of where the children sleep belongs to the father. Scripturally, man always has 100% custody of the children. The woman does not. Man can decide to share his children, but no one can take his custody from him.