To the American way

Meet lead, bite and (Dodger) blue

In the wake of the July 4 holiday weekend, we pause to celebrate some true Americans, people who embody what it is our country is all about:

Rod Blagojevich

A jury said Illinois' former governor attempted to sell Barack Obama's vacated U.S. Senate seat. Sure, you could call it corruption, but real Americans call it capitalism.

Florida grandmother

Still unidentified by police, this great patriot gave her granddaughter's teacher an end-of-the-year gift box that included a loaded .22-caliber handgun, because she knows that a real American doesn't just exercise her right to bear arms, she also forces other people to exercise theirs.

Don Gorske

Back in May, this Wisconsin resident ate his 25,000th McDonald's Big Mac, putting him atop the U.S. food pyramid, because the only thing more American than mass consumption or fast food is the mass consumption of fast food.

The Los Angeles Dodgers

Baseball might be America's game, but bankruptcy is quickly becoming America's pastime, so the Dodgers are pretty much as American as a bald eagle playing the national anthem on a hot dog.

Ryan Seacrest

Not only is he the face of "American Idol," but he is probably the only person who can actually convince Americans to vote for something.