Happy Gilmore

“We’re on Long Island, baby, where men are men!” one fan yelled. “Put that umbrella down!”

I don’t know. When I think of places where men are men I think of Texas, Montana, Wyoming, or my home state of Tennessee. But Long Island? Has the term “manly men” ever even been used in the same sentence as Long Island? Seriously, I’m pretty sure of all 50 states and any number of countries that contain manly men, Long Island is way down at the bottom.

Hell, my bet is Liechtenstein has more manly men than fricken Long Island.

And Tiger Woods? These manly men actually heckled Tiger Woods? The man has more talent and class in his big toenail than they all have together. And I’m not even a golfer. Or a golf fan.

And neither are they evidently.

Makes you wonder about that old joke. You know, “Long Island, Where men are men and sheep are scared.”