Friday, September 11

Spanish Antics

We accomplished our mission to find out what the Argentine ants are up to in Spain by virtue of running a camera continuously while Whiplash and I bombarded the Spanish ant scientist with questions. It was a bit like when they send children out to interview celebrities. Among other things we established that;

a) The Argentine ants in Spain are indeed part of a global supercolony*

b) Human activity makes exactly the right conditions for invasive species

c) The ant scientist's favourite colour is yellow and he often has a croissant for breakfast

Our work done, Whiplash and I retired to Cadaqués, a ridiculously picturesque seaside town close to the French border. Salvador Dali made his home there, and it is impossible to turn a corner without seeing his famously mustachioed face. We visited Dali’s very theatrical house which is stuffed with all sorts of things; bottoms, bosoms, mirrors, taxidermied swans, the odd bear and a boss-eyed owl.

I had completely misunderstood the importance of the holy toast (see last post). Too late I realised that, rather than eat it, I should have hung it medallion-like around my neck to ward off the series of temptations placed in my path by Whiplash. I shall not go into detail (I have many episodes on film and plan to start up a sideline business). Hauling the bottles up the hill to the apartment was great for our lungs and biceps but the positive effects might be outweighed by the fact that I’ve started smoking again. I’ve also come home with ‘prickly heat’ – at least I think that’s what the rash is, either that or I’ve picked up something from the daily foam party.

Pop-tastic video courtesy of Whiplash on her mobile phone

*most species of ants make a nest that works like a self-contained state, when they meet ants from another nest, whether of their own species or different one they behave aggressively and often kill each other. Ants of the same species that have formed multiple nests and act in a friendly way towards each other become a supercolony - a sort of federation, they will all be related to each other. Usually a supercolony extends over a few metres or even kilometres of land area, the Argentine Ants have formed a supercolony that extends across continents

But did you smoke Ducados? I used to love those, and their added advantage was that nobody else did, ensuring that they wouldn't get cadged before you'd smoked them. And is that you with the hat and the lovely auburn hair in a plait??

Went for a walk the other evening with a few other folk, and we became covered in flying ants. But only the men. What was that about? Are flying ants female? Or selective about pheromones? Don't like scent? I was wearing a pink shirt...

If that's your plait then it must be your jawline too (well, not exactly, I seem to have muddled my pronouns, but you know what I mean). Hmm, I had a jawline once, I think hickory-shafted golf clubs were involved [totters off dribbling senilely]. I wonder where I put those teeth...

Brother T - that's a nuptial flight when the new ants all go off and try to establish a new colony, it only happens once a year so you were jolly lucky but taking a risk, don't you know that a pink shirt makes a man irresistible?

Welcome Wendy - It's not a complicated back story, I bring news of exotic delights such as foam parties Prayer Ladies.

Loved the foam party vid. And, hanging out at Dali's place, boobs and bottoms notwithstanding, I'd like that. Just recently watched a documentary on him and his later work, and much of the film took place in that domicile.