Fargo, ND – An area 4th-grader was recently denied the privilege of dessert after his mother overheard him voice his disapproval of dinner. The boy, said by his mother to have been watching an “inappropriate movie” with his father, is alleged to have called dinner “cold and shitty by the time we all sat down to eat”. The mother, upon hearing the child mutter these profanities under his breath, immediately sent the child to his room which, in turn, revoked his privilege of dessert that the rest of the family was able to indulge in. The Observer caught up with the boy to get his side of the story:

“Liver and onions is fucking shitty and I hate it, so…”

The lesson learned here is simple: avoid liver and onions at all costs, even if it costs you dessert.