Walmart has everything, including shooting victims. Everyday low prices on 'em, too. You can return 'em within 30 days, no questions asked, unless they're electronic; then you have 15 days and there may be a restocking fee.

So if responding bystander grabs some towels off the shelves to try and stop the bleeding from a victim's injury, is Walmart going to have the good samaritan charged with theft unless he/she pays for the items?

xcv:So if responding bystander grabs some towels off the shelves to try and stop the bleeding from a victim's injury, is Walmart going to have the good samaritan charged with theft unless he/she pays for the items?Nope, just a sale for red towels.

I live in Nova Scotia and I'm always intrigued by these Walmart stories. We just don't attract/get that degree of whackadoodle around here. Sometimes, I gotta admit, I feel cheated. No people in bizarre outfits, hardly any screaming kids, very few hoveround users. And I can't remember a single gun incident. Walmarts here are really pretty boring.

The most important sentence in the story:Army Sgt. Carlos Morales said he, his wife and his kids were in a nearby aisle. His wife played with a hula hoop, then they started walking to where the store displays TVs, Morales said.

xcv:So if responding bystander grabs some towels off the shelves to try and stop the bleeding from a victim's injury, is Walmart going to have the good samaritan charged with theft unless he/she pays for the items?

"We remain concerned for our associate and pray for a quick recovery from his injuries."

Umm...Isn't Walmart rather notorious for buying life insurance policies for its employees (with the company listed as beneficiary) and cashing-in when they die? Those prayers aren't for a quick recovery...they're for a quick payout.

And many of them are just difficult to miss when you pull the trigger.

We should shoot people for being weird/ugly/bad dressers?

Also as a employee, after the Sandy Hook shooting, we have discussed with each other what we think the store would do if someone were shot. Would we close for the day? If it were an employee who was shot? Those kind of things. I guess we know the answer now.

FatherDale:The most important sentence in the story:Army Sgt. Carlos Morales said he, his wife and his kids were in a nearby aisle. His wife played with a hula hoop, then they started walking to where the store displays TVs, Morales said.

They still sell hula hoops?? I'd think a kid's first reaction would be "no battery or USB port? screw that."

Sass-O-Rev:I live in Nova Scotia and I'm always intrigued by these Walmart stories. We just don't attract/get that degree of whackadoodle around here. Sometimes, I gotta admit, I feel cheated. No people in bizarre outfits, hardly any screaming kids, very few hoveround users. And I can't remember a single gun incident. Walmarts here are really pretty boring.

I should hook you up with my travel agent.The Southern WalMart tour is by far the more popular package. It offers a much more colorful view and experience.But the MidWest tour is very popular also. It offers a glimpse into the whole WalMart bathroom meth making experience.

It took a dozen police cruisers, to get a guy in a motorized scooter, and then they removed his prosthetic legs. You know, just in case he tried to overpower them. Cops always come out looking silly in these stories.

mrbach:It took a dozen police cruisers, to get a guy in a motorized scooter, and then they removed his prosthetic legs. You know, just in case he tried to overpower them. Cops always come out looking silly in these stories.

It took a dozen cops to respond to gunfire in a public shopping center with limited information about what was happening.

Can you think of a better reason to go to walmart?We should be thanking this guy and encouraging copycats.I mean seriously have you ever watched the people that go to walmart, Idiocracy has come to life.

The Downfall:Also as a employee, after the Sandy Hook shooting, we have discussed with each other what we think the store would do if someone were shot. Would we close for the day? If it were an employee who was shot? Those kind of things. I guess we know the answer now.

1. CNN would commission theme music and special graphics for the tragedy.2. Walmart would close all stores (alll hourly employees on unpaid leave) worldwide for a week in mourning and in preparation for the re-opening sale.3. The affected store would be shuttered, demolished and re-built as a memorial to the victims and Sam Walton.4. Bricks form the demolished store would be displayed at all remaining Walmarts and serve as a touchstone for pilgrims wishing to express their condolences and receive additional discounts.

John Walton appeared to me in a vision and told me this. I wrote the words down on Maker's Mark toilet tissue to preserve them.