R U KIDDING ME? Last week, Rosie O’Donnell kept her controversial tenure on The View rolling when, during a discussion of Danny De Vito’s lubricated appearance on the show, she managed to pull off a Chinese "impression" that would have them rolling their eyes during morning recess.

"I certainly hope that one day they will be able to grasp her humour," Cindy Berger, O’Donnell’s representative, told the New York Daily News. The problem is that a child can "grasp" Rosie’s humour; an adult rejects it for being puerile and childish.

This week, though, O’Donnell published an apology, of sorts, on her blog, responding to Ben, an offended Asian fan, who wrote that "You say how you dont understand what the fuss is about, but its hard 2 understand w/o having grown up Asian. Imagine a derogatory gay joke. If YOU got bent outta shape about it, I WOULD understand…"

"i am sorry it hurt u / i didnt think of it the way it was taken / i will b more sensitive / promise," O’Donnell responded.

Which sort of settles the whole issue; either Rosie’s hired a 15-year-old who text messages her all of her material, or she’s been secretly replaced by Prince.

YAY! A NEW LOW! The BBC is recreating a rape trial to be judged by a celebrity jury, according to a story on the Fox News website.

The four-day trial of two footballers accused of rape will be filmed in a real courtroom with a presiding judge, and celebrity jurors will include novelist and disgraced peer Jeffrey Archer, former footballer Stan Collymore, onetime Bond girl Honor Blackman and ex-Tory cabinet minister Michael Portillo. And so we move one step closer to televised executions.

IT’S A GOOD THING, POTTYMOUTH: Martha Stewart will be interviewed by fellow Sirius satellite radio host Howard Stern on his show starting today at 7:30 a.m.

The interview is a celebration of Stewart’s one-year anniversary with her own show on the network. No news yet as to whether Stern will ask her to make out with a stripper.