There are two reasons for reading a newspaper. One is so that we have the day's gossip at our tongue's tip for the tea hour and the other is to keep up with history in the making.

Even now at twenty-one if someone would give me the price of four years in a good college I would grab the opportunity. Most girls graduate by the time they reach maturity but I'd be willing to make it to twenty-five!

I wonder what would happen between John and me if I were to acquire a college education.

This afternoon I wondered if reading Keyserling's Book of Marriage or H.G. Wells' Outline of History would ever be beneficial to me! The answer came tonight when Miss Lucy Powell lectured me on India. I was surprised to find how much I'd learned about the caste system and Hindu marriage and life from those two books alone. E. Stanley Jones' book The Christ of the Indian Road, magazine and newspaper articles all helped. It does pay to read. Several times lately I've spoken to John of the fact that people never seem to converse on any subject that I read about. Also today in reading I found a chapter simplified by the recollection of Dr. Morgan's lectures in the fall. Some day I may know something.

John and I saw Viennese Nights* - this evening. It was quite lovely. The story was so sentimental but the music was very good. I enjoyed it and it seems that John did too, in spite of himself.

And I keep on loving him in spite of myself. John is purposely and deliberately trying to change his disposition. I loved him as the idealist that he was - why should he try to be so philosophical. Why does he force himself to be so cold and distant? Why doesn't he deliberately take me into his arms and tell me he can't live without me? Why doesn't he tell me he loves me and that no one else in the world would fill my place? Why does he starve me - if he really loves me? Why do I love him?

This has been an interesting day - free from monotony - at least. When I first arrived at the office this morning Mr. Lexton was there, much to my pleasure and surprise. At lunch time I took a walk and met a classmate of high school days. This afternoon Mr. Dia brought me home - a round about way through beautiful country. I'm proud of Philadelphia and Penn. A pattern I ordered arrived - but alas! It was the wrong one. John called me (no more cheerful than usual). Poor boy, he tried again for another position with no luck. He cannot expect to get one with a bank for months to come.

Tom Bateman called and said he would come see me if I would keep other fellows away. He's cheerful and said he was glad to see me looking so well!

Elizabeth and I talked for an hour and 25 minutes on the flower show, school days, books and other interests. I've laundered my hair and silk undies and answered (accepted) an invitation.

I am sure I should be the President of the United States, the Board of Directors of the Germantown Trust Co. and the manager of all the shops from which I buy. I've had a deuce of a time to get one small dress pattern!!

At noontime Mr. Dia(?) took me for a lovely ride. He had to go through the countryside to look up company billboards so he very generously asked me to go with him. I wonder if John will care when I tell him? I'm afraid he won't!

the bridge at Mrs. Willits' was rather fun. There were three prizes and I had fourth highest score.

Dr. Willits gave Mrs. Willits a unique Christmas present, two dollars worth of flowers each week for twelve weeks.

I've got to reach a conclusion of some kind. It is very hard to know whether or not we should go on. We are not companionable now. I lack many qualities he would have in a wife. John thinks that marriage would settle some of (most of) our problems. According to modern philosophers, marriage is the acceptance of responsibilities and the beginning of new problems.

How can we expect it to solve our problems. If I knew whether leaving John would help or harm him I could decide in an instance what steps to take. If I knew whether we have a beautiful friendship grown out of long acquaintance, a sexual attraction or real love upon which marriage should be based - I could decide.

At twenty-two John is disappointed with life. It would help to know how much I have to do with it if anything. Where love is concerned is there ever any doubt?

Another evening with practically nothing said to me. It is beginning to amound to rudeness.

Mr. Lexton thinks there is never any doubt to real love. "I hope you make the right decision, Miss Scott," he said in his sweet manner.

I rushed today without saying goodbye to him so I had to call from the station to wish him a speedy recovery. I wonder if John will care? I think he won't. A few years ago he would have! but nothing makes much difference to him anymore.

I shall be very, very sorry when Mr. Lexton leaves. It has been a pleasure and a real privilege to know him. He is ever ready to smile and always cheerful without being an optimistic fool. His brother has recently been offered a full scholarship at the University of Edinborough.

Knowing him has increased the complexity of my "inferiority complex" - mentally and morally he is so far above me.

John no longer cares to share my thoughts or to share his with me. If he is not even polite this evening when he calls I shall call his attention to the fact though I have sworn I will not nag him - ever.

Context

This is the journal of Virginia Lee Scott, my grandmother, written when she was seventeen and first dating my grandfather, John Arnold Wilson. It's a dairy published by Media Drug Stores and includes space for two entries per day, with facts about the era printed at the bottom, which I have included in italics. Following, 1928, is the journal of John Arnold Wilson, my grandfather, at age nineteen and in love with my grandmother, followed by my grandmother's journal in 1931.​