you'll soon come to realize im not the girl next door im the bitch across the street! xo

12.12.2009

drunkards....

so last night I fell into a category I've never fallen into when being drunk and that was the crying drunk! i will give myself a pat on the back because i did go outside and the person i was crying about didn't see me! (ya i cried over a boy i apparently do have a heart ha) but why did i steady look like "la llorna"! or the dead prom queen i was 2 Halloweens ago with my MAC liner lookin like tracks on my face! anyways I'm over it and the boy well that's for another post!

but onto the 5 most common drunkards you've all been don't act brand new and front like you haven't! and if you haven't i suggest you try it out:)

Crying Drunk- Unfortunately this drunkard is usually a female. After the alcohol starts flowing, it seems to start flowing out their tear ducts as well and for something more than likely in their past! Most of the time that thing is their ex-boo. Or possibly could be something as serious as their dog dying 10 years ago!

Angry Drunk - This drunkard is usually the one arguing over the win or loss of their favorite football team or threatening to fight you if you look at their girlfriend/boyfriend again! They soon come to think their invisible and can whoop that big ass bitch they really wouldn’t look at on any given sober day! They look for anything and anyone to pick a fight with !

Nurturing Drunk – This drunkard acts like the mother, dd or owner of “your” house. If there is a spill they’d be the ones to clean it up! If someone is about to spit chunks this drunk will be getting water and a trash can! This drunkard will more than likely hold your hair back while their complimenting your shade of vomit !

Hugging Drunk- Don’t get this drunkard twisted with the horny drunk. Hugging drunks are very loving drunks! And they like to hug strangers and express how much they “love you”! This drunkard finds every action deserves a hug! Like you just won the shake that ass contest girl! Lets hug it out! Your girlfriend/boyfriend just macked with someone else! Lets hug on that note! You caught a case of the clap! Lets hug to that!

Drunk Texter – This drunkard realizes right when the club is closing that their not getting no ass tonight, no girl/guy is going to come up to them with a sign on their forhead that says “please F me” That’s when they text their last casual delight and decide they should at this point talk about being a couple which in turn would leave to another casual delight. The texts being sent will also have misspelled words such as “the” “drunk” and “come” ! drunk+text=a wreck