Usually I get invited to parties and find that I have no one to go with so I ask my one of my good friends to come. But I find all the time she makes up moany excuses like:
"Oh I've got work tommorow"
"I can't be bothered"

And she always sort of says yes but at the last minute always makes up these excuses and says "Ok I'll let you know later on" which always means no. One time I asked her to come out and she already went out with her friends in central London. We are close friends and chat on the phone and meet each other for lunch because we work nearby and we go to the same school. Also I invite her out loads with my friends and she always declines yet she never invites me out with her lot.

I don't know if she's like this because she's quite restricted (her familys indian and she is a major geek-and I'm neither) but she has let me down sooooo many times and its really pissing me off.

I've invited her out to an 18th tonight but I bet she'll decline. I've asked other people but everyones being a bit wishy-washy. I have another friend to go out with but haven't asked her yet and we hang out too much anyway. What do I do?

(Original post by AP123)
I admit I can be like this friend of yours sometimes, in that I make up excuses sometimes when I can't be bothered (which use to be a lot but I'm changing my ways).

Be honest with her, tell her that she keeps letting you down, guilt trip her. Sounds like she deserves it.

Tbh I'm sick of her moany, granny behaviour, she even criticised my own party saying "How many people were there" IN THAT WAY.
Do you think it would be drastic if I just cut off all contact with her? It seems like the only times she's willing to meet me is during lunch breaks. She never really phones me but she does respond to texts and when we are on the phone we speak for hours and have fun. But it seems like she's never up for anything.

Shall I just stop meeting her for lunch as punishment? Or just ignore her texts and calls (like she sometimes does mine)

(Original post by Anonymous)
Tbh I'm sick of her moany, granny behaviour, she even criticised my own party saying "How many people were there" IN THAT WAY.
Do you think it would be drastic if I just cut off all contact with her? It seems like the only times she's willing to meet me is during lunch breaks. She never really phones me but she does respond to texts and when we are on the phone we speak for hours and have fun. But it seems like she's never up for anything.

Shall I just stop meeting her for lunch as punishment? Or just ignore her texts and calls (like she sometimes does mine)

Well don't ignore her, that's a bit childish imo. But stop inviting her out, often this puts 'friends' in their place and should make them realise the situation. Still meet her at lunch breaks, if you like. But I think you should talk to her about this. How she keeps letting you down and never seems up for going out, yet she goes out with her other mates.

Too many friendships break unnecessarily, communication ftw, tell her what you feel about all of this.

I don't think that the friendship really works in more of a having lunch together way. I think she's just trying to let you down gently, without saying no outright. I've been in the situation boths times on either side, and if don't want to carry on the way you're going then just start stopping inviting her out and just leave it to just lunch times together. Don't break it off completely but just slow it down...

(Original post by Jim-ie)
well i would if i was still in england im not at the minute, wanna ask her to pay for my flight? could be there in 2 hours!

Tis a shame Dont know if she'd want to pay though...are you in Europe?
OP, I think you should just talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. Communication really is key in friendships, maybe she doesnt realise what shes doing. Similar things have happened to me and I've had absolutely no idea that she was feeling so upset about it.

(Original post by kcfch)
Tis a shame Dont know if she'd want to pay though...are you in Europe?
OP, I think you should just talk to her about it and tell her how you feel. Communication really is key in friendships, maybe she doesnt realise what shes doing. Similar things have happened to me and I've had absolutely no idea that she was feeling so upset about it.

Belfast

And OP, if you've been to invited to this party surely you know people there already?