Monday, March 22, 2010

And if you writer folk ever wonder if my job as a composer is different: it's not. I sit in my chair and I stare at a piece of paper and then write something down. Some days I write something, anything, to get the juices flowing. There are days when I'm amazed at how much this job has in common with sweeping the floor or digging a ditch. It's work, and it's hard.

But I like that it's hard. It beats anything else in the world that I've done. Except writing stories, but I never seem to finish those. Still, writing prose has made a difference in my composing, because I can talk to people in terms of the story and drama.

Also, I'm really happy the health care bill passed. There's a "tunnel at the end of the tunnel" in the words of Paul Krugman, but we're on our way.

The coffee doesn't taste so bad now. And I'm crowing about the $2.50 (plus the 10.25% SALES TAX our illustrious Illinois government has on Chicago merchandise) I'm saving by not running to the nearest 7-11 to get creamer. Not to mention, I'm noticing some weight loss. And it's just from making this one simple change.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Day 2 of the "no cream in my coffee" regimen. Not enjoying my morning coffee nearly as much, but I feel a tiny sense of accomplishment from staying away from the cream yesterday. Also managed to get in my yoga for three days in a row. Muscles are a little sore, but I feel better overall.

Bad news is I'm really behind on one of my assignments. Deadlines are looming. Not sure I'll be able to keep up the routine all week.

EDIT: I've decided to give this little adventure a name. Operation Ass Reduction is in full effect.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

For years I never remembered my dreams. When people talked about theirs, I would listen with some measure of jealousy, since the last dream I remembered having was the night before an audition for a jazz group, which was horrible (the dream was horrible, although I didn't really enjoy the audition, either). I dreamt I was in a warehouse with a group of people and a priest with the weirdest eyes showed up, and everyone had to bow down to him. I won't say what happened, but it was bad. And Michael Stipe from REM was in the dream, too—although he didn't take part in the mayhem. In the dream, anyway.

I think after that I was scared to dream.

But lately I've been having lots of dreams, and, if I interpret them correctly, they're mostly dreams questioning my competence. A few weeks ago I dreamt I had moved to a new city and was really lonely, and Chris Eldin entered my dream and offered to be my pet turtle. So she turned herself into a turtle, only in my dream I knew NOTHING about caring for turtles, and had to start my research from scratch. Naturally I was under a deadline, since even turtles in captivity will eventually die without care, so I spent the dream racing around trying to keep her warm. I put her under blankets, wrapped her in towels and kept asking her if she was cold. Being a turtle and not being able to talk, she kept nodding. Eventually I found a heat lamp and put her under that in her aquarium. I don't think she'd mind my recounting the dream, as she said it should be a story. Perhaps someday it will be.

My last two dreams have been just as weird, as dreams are wont to do. In one, I dreamt I was waiting tables again, and the restaurant filled up and I felt woefully out of practice (not that I was ever a good waitress to begin with), and things kept going wrong. In the second dream I was an actress who forgot to study the lines for her play until the night before the performance.

I think it may just be graduation freak out time. But in a way, I'm glad I'm remembering my dreams. Makes life more interesting.

Friday, March 12, 2010

I just had a big steak and a beer, and it wasn't as much fun as I thought it would be. I don't know why I got a hankering, but I did. I didn't even like the steak much. And the chicken I fixed last week is now slowly turning to gelatin in the fridge. The truth is, I don't think I like meat much anymore. Yet I don't like veggies much, either. If I stop liking fruit, I am definitely screwed.

Going to start the new yoga DVD tomorrow. The fruit smoothies I've been drinking are great; I feel so much better! But I've not lost any weight, despite the copious amounts of yogurt I put into my smoothies. Maybe a little bit, but . . . see above. I've not really changed any of my other habits. I keep thinking once I get to L.A., I'll suddenly leap into this ultra-healthy lifestyle (counting on you, Sarah - heh). We shall see. It's hard to stay healthy in the city of the Deep Dish Pizza. Right now I'm getting on the treadmill for a half an hour about once every week and a half. That's not good.

But I've been doing a hell of a lot more composing, and that IS good. I just have to clean up my room and stop screwing around in the morning when I get up. Yeah, yeah, I "need" that extra cup of coffee. (Some mornings I do, but . . . )

And honestly, I think that's the biggest problem right there: caffeine. I don't know whether it can make you gain weight, but all the freaking cream I drink can't be helping matters any. I've thought about cutting it out, but I don't like black coffee, and the thought of going without coffee kind of scares me. (I guess that means I'm an addict? Caffeineaholics Anonymous, anyone?) I'm trying to either drink the soy or fat-free creamer, but more often than not, I find myself in 7-11 picking up the sugared, fatty sweet creamer just because it's conveniently available. What I might do is just drink the coffee black throughout the week and then on the weekends have the cream too, as a treat. Hmmm. Have I bored you enough???

I've been a little better about turning off my light at night when I sleep, but I'm still going to bed to take "naps." I'm looking into one of those alarms hard of hearing people have, where it zaps a finger or something. We shall see. And one of the contacts in my last set ripped, so now I'm wearing the glasses that have unremovable spots on them. Sexy.

Getting a few more samples here and there. I have one nearly mixed and it will go up on the website and in the libraries of which I'm a part. Some exciting things are happening, and when I know more I'll be sure to keep you posted. Just one of those "in the works" things.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

So. Private composition lessons are going very well. I'm definitely experiencing some real growth as a composer, and I know that's due to Hummie's methods and his insistence that I make a sketch of my pieces by hand. "Make the sketch clear," he keeps telling me whenever put my chicken scratches in front of him.

I knew the first day he started teaching us that THIS was the stuff I had been looking for as a composer. He's uber-organized, and I'm taking a cue (no pun intended) from his song book about that. I still have a long way to go both organizationally and compositionally, but for the first time in a while now I'm making progress. I feel a lot more confident when I sit down to score a scene. It's like we're pushing that boulder of doubt out of the way. The only bummer is that I only have a couple of months left under his and Andy Hill's tutelage. I'm trying to make the most of it.

My biggest problem right now is my sleeping. I've gotten into the bad habit of sleeping with my light on. I go to bed with work unfinished, intending to "take a nap." Usually the nap last 6 - 8 hours, but I never really feel rested because I left my contacts in, my jeans (and sometimes shoes) on, and my light on. Hence I'm writing this post at 3:30 in the morning. Undoubtedly I'll be tired tomorrow, too.