Welcome to the Game Day Fire Drill, for this, Calgary’s 81st game of the season on April 8, 2010. Flames/Wild. A matchup for the ages.

Years from now we will tell our children of a game between two titans, neither of whom made the playoffs and both of whom, based on their performances over the past couple weeks, seem too bothered by it.

One team has a captain that is an excellent leader and even better player. The other team has Jarome Iginla.

I have a number of jokes written in this vein, and...

Oh who cares. It's still a hockey game even if it doesn't matter. Watch it or don't.

Who

The Calgary Flames (40-31-9 for 89 points. Ninth in the West, third in the Northwest) and the Minnesota Wild (37-36-7 for 81 points. Thirteenth in the West, fourth in the Northwest).

When

Where

Pengrowth Saddledome, Calgary, Alberta.

Calgary is 20-17-3 at home this year, and has one goal in two games against Minnesota in Calgary. The Wild are 12-24-4 away from home, and haven't beaten a non-playoff team on the road since March 3 (when they played the Flames, of course).

What (to hate about the Wild)

Andrew Brunette — At 36 years old, he's having an excellent season. He's scored 25 goals and assisted on 35 others. That's more goals than everyone on the Flames but Iginla and Bourque, and more assists than everyone but Iginla.

Guillaume Latendresse — He has 25 goals in 55 games for Minnesota, and four have been against Calgary.

Niklas Backstrom — He's 3-1 against Calgary this year, with a 1.49 GAA and a .941 save percentage. Yikes.

Why

Because why not endure the horror for another two games? Enjoy the game, and remember you have a lot to live for in the comments section.

Yer ol' buddy Lambert is handsome and great and everyone loves him. Also you can visit his regular blog at The Two-Line Pass or follow him on Twitter. Lucky you!