IN the wake of Baby P – the London toddler who died after he was left with his parents to suffer horrific but undetected abuse – more children are being put into care. And yet there is a desperate shortage of foster parents. In Coventry there are 445 children in foster care, primarily because of family breakdown, drug addiction, mental illness, domestic abuse or neglect.

Two carers, Suzanne Davies and Caroline Gilbey, tell feature writer Catherine Vonledebur how they cope with the demands of modern day fostering.

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AS a foster carer you can never feel fully qualified to deal with unforeseen family dramas and tragedies that can unfold in a child’s life.

Single mum Suzanne Davies became a childminder and foster carer after working in catering for 20 years.

She has fostered five girls and one boy over the past seven years. Suzanne also child minds ten children, aged one to 10, at different times during the week.

The 56-year-old said: “It’s funny, when I was younger I never felt my biological clock ticking. I didn’t have Alex until I was 42 – and now look at me!”

In the cosy mid-terrace in the south of Coventry she shares with 15-year-old daughter Alex, and pet guinea pig Minx, Suzanne clearly thrives on a busy household.

Her first experience taking care of two vulnerable sisters was emotional.

The mum-of-one said: “One day Social Services rang and asked if I could take two little girls – aged four and five.

“Their mother was a victim of domestic abuse and an alcoholic, and it was felt that they were at risk of harm.”

While in Suzanne’s care the sisters lost several close family members in tragic circumstances.

What started off as a four-month stay ended up a two-year placement.

Suzanne had the skills to handle the situation with empathy, sensitivity and common sense.

She said: “I was just worried about how it would affect them.

“It is difficult because you are unsure of their reactions.

“When their grandmother died I had to tell them this other bad news. “I said: ‘Girls, I need to talk to you’. And one of them said: ‘Who’s died now?’ That’s the way children deal with things.

”They were lovable, beautiful kids. I loved them to bits, so did Alex.”

During their placement Suzanne took the girls on holiday to Disneyworld in Florida.

Foster parents are given an allowance to cover the cost of caring for a child in their home from £109 a week for a baby to £164 for a 16 and 17-year-old to include food and clothes.

“I think the allowance you get is quite generous and allows you to do lots of nice things,” said Suzanne.

The sisters are now aged eight and nine, are living with extended family.

Suzanne said: “It broke my heart when they left – it really upset me, letting them go... but the people they went to are wonderful people.

“The girls are doing really well. I still see them regularly and we keep in touch.

“The amount of people who said what a difference I made to their lives.

“It was a real success story from my point of view, the girls’ and the fostering service.”

Eight years ago, Suzanne chose to find out about fostering after a split with her husband. While Alex, then seven, was at primary school she became a childminder.

Suzanne said: “I saw an advert about fostering and phoned up about it. It seemed natural. Alex is very caring as well and I thought it would be positive for her growing up with siblings.”

Her training started with a four-week preparation course, followed by eight to 10 home visits by a social worker.

“They talk you through your life, your family background and upbringing,” said the mum-of-one. “I thought I could empathise with these children.”

Becoming a foster carer has given Suzanne “the greatest job satisfaction”. She said: “When you find something you like doing, you don’t wake up and think: ‘Oh no I have to go to work today’.

“I’ve obviously found something I enjoy doing – it is challenging, but the rewards are a lot greater.

“It’s not a money issue; you have to like children and as a single parent you can be at home with your own children.

“And it keeps me young! I love having fun with the kids whether it’s tobogganing at SnowDome or a day out at Drayton Manor Park!

“As a single carer you have your support network. It’s a big responsibility, you can’t just leave your foster children with anyone – they have to be police checked.”

Not all foster placements run smoothly, she admits. Suzanne cared for one teenage girl for nine months, but sadly it did not work out. She said: “She wanted to be with her friends on the other side of the city. I never knew what time she would come home after school and I needed to know she was safe.

“The Fostering Service don’t expect you to be superhuman.

“I do respite care for another teenager, who is fabulous.

“I am not trying to say fostering is a doddle, but if you genuinely care for the children it’s so rewarding.”

Eighteen months ago Suzanne completed an NVQ 3 in social care for children and young people.

Suzanne said: “I put it off for ages I am a single mum, and a child minder – the last thing I wanted to do was study.

“I actually found it was easy and my trainer was the best in the world. I finished it in no time at all. You can’t take things at face value – as in any job you learn as you go along.

“The training makes you see things from a child’s perspective. I see how important self-esteem is for all children.”

For the last four months Suzanne has been fostering a 10-year-old girl with special needs.

She said: “She’s a lovely girl, one of nine children.

“You have to remember these children need extra attention and care.

“She goes trampolining and horse riding every week. The school says she was a changed girl straight away. Her teacher told me she loves having clean clothes every day.”

Case Study

SEVEN years ago Caroline and Andy Gilbey decided to offer respite care for children with special needs during the summer holidays.

They did not have children of their own, and they had the space and time to spare.

Caroline, aged 37, is a teaching assistant at Woodfield School for children with emotional and behavioural difficulties, Stoneleigh Road, Coventry. Andy, aged 39, is a self-employed builder.

The couple first came to foster two sisters with special needs aged four and seven.

Caroline said: “The girls had been moved around quite a lot they came to us before they were going to be split up.

“Their mum has learning difficulties and their dad had passed away. They had attachment issues and learning needs – but when they came here it just seemed to work.”

Caroline said: “The younger sister was prone to temper tantrums – she would bite, hit and scratch. There were times when we had to carry her out of shops.

“But she hated missing out. If she had a tantrum Andy would take the older one out to the park, and she would want to go too. It was easy.

“It might be because of where I work, I quite liked that challenge.

“In the beginning I was a bit ‘teacherfied’ with them. We had never had children before, then all of a sudden we had them 24/7.

“But the girls settled in really well and we thoroughly enjoyed being able to go for days out to the Sealife Centre or Cadbury World.

“After 12 months the younger one’s behaviour had settled down.”

Three years into the girls’ placement Caroline became pregnant after having IVF.

There was a discussion between the couple and Social Services about the girls going into respite care while Caroline had the baby.

But Caroline and Andy felt it was important for the sisters to feel secure and remain at home.

Two months before Kye was born the family moved to a new house in the village of Wolston, between Coventry and Rugby.

Caroline said: “The girls saw the house being built, they picked their rooms and helped to choose the decor.

“One of the first things the eldest wanted was a plaque on the door with her name on it!

“When Kye was born the girls were allowed to come and see him in the hospital.”

Caroline and Andy fostered the two sisters on a long-term basis.

“They are part of our family now,” said Caroline. “They fitted into our lives – we could carry on having a social life and our friends and family accepted them.

“Kye has never been used to anything different – to him they are his sisters. They have a typical brother-sister relationship.”

The girls are now 11 and 14.

Like many girls their age they enjoy jazz dancing, jigsaws and reading.

The older one goes to Guides, the younger one – “who’s a bit of a tomboy and more outgoing” – goes to Scouts.

As well as her professional teaching assistant qualifications Caroline has completed an NVQ 3 in social care for children and young people.

The couple feel it is their role to stand up and speak out for the girls at numerous meetings, care reviews, school reviews and assessments.

Caroline said: “Andy is so laid-back and takes everything in his stride. When the girls first came I was working full-time so he did most of the meetings.

“I knew the younger one could make it in mainstream school, but at first it felt like no one wanted to know.

“The special school they go to is really fantastic, but at the mainstream school she will see people in the village including her best friend. She currently goes half a day. I’m hoping eventually it will be 50-50.”

Caroline and Paul are extremely proud of the sisters’ progress.

Caroline said: “The most rewarding bit is seeing the change in their behaviour, and seeing the younger one going into mainstream is a massive achievement.

“It is really nice they are so dependent on me.

“This year their school reports were fantastic. I had a tear in my eye when I read the younger one’s – it said: ‘No behaviour issues this year’.”

Grandparents are involved too...

CAROLINE Gilbey’s parents Lawrie and Maureen Tizick were so impressed by their daughter and son-in-law’s commitment to fostering, they followed their footsteps.

The Coventry couple were approved as foster parents in May 2005 for up to three children under 11-years old.

Since then they have fostered 17 children on short-term placements.

They are looking after two sisters who are four and seven years old.

Maureen, aged 60, a registered childminder, said: “We were very pleased Caroline and Andy were fostering. They have done amazingly well.

“We had wanted to foster for a while but I was working full time and my husband was looking after his elderly mother.

“Fostering has to be something you want to do. It keeps us active, it’s very rewarding, but frustrating at times.

“Obviously you get attached. We had one little boy from four days old until he was 18 months – it’s hard not to when you are doing everything for them.

“You’d never believe some of the stories. The baby’s was one of the most horrendous stories but we feel we did him proud – as far as we know he is starting school.“

Lawrie, aged 64, a former development engineer at Marconi for 30 years, is now vice chair of Coventry Foster Carers’ Association, and his daughter is treasurer.

Caroline said: “Dad’s got really actively involved.

“We try and have at least one family holiday together. Last year we went caravanning in South Wales. It was a really nice campsite perfect for all the kids. ”

* Do you have the skills to foster? Call the Recruitment Team on 024 7678 5577.

Fostering Factfile

Of the 445 children in foster care in Coventry:

* Just over 25 per cent are aged between one and four years old but 40 per cent are aged 10 to 15.

* Around 70 per cent come from a white British background but there are significant numbers of children from mixed race backgrounds - Particularly white/Caribbean and white/Asian

* More foster carers are needed for African and Caribbean children.

* The main reasons for children in Coventry coming into care are: neglect and breakdown in family relationships.

* Family breakdowns are commonly linked to alcohol or drugs misuse, domestic violence or long term mental health issues. All of these can have an impact on the parents’ ability to care for their child/children.