Aw, This Minions Honest Trailer Is Just Mean, Watch It Now

Hating the Minions can make you feel guilty. Sure, they deserve it for being so incessantly noisy, evil, and speaking non-stop gibberish, but they’re just so cute to look at that wanting to repeatedly punch them in their faces isn’t good for the soul. That’s why those of you that feel that way should immediately stop what you are doing and watch the video below. Because Honest Trailers have savaged the recent Minions film in a brutal and enjoyable fashion, all for your pleasure.

Simply sublime. Those diminutive, jaundice bastards have been asking for that for a very long time. Or have they? Yes. Yes they have. Because while we all chortled and laughed at the presence of Gru’s evil henchmen in both Despicable Me and Despicable Me 2, at no point did anyone ever even briefly think that an entire film of their gormless antics would be enjoyable.

Unless if you were 6, maybe, at a push, 7. But the movie business doesn’t work in this fashion. And with Despicable Me and Despicable Me 2 having grossed over $1.4 billion at the box office, and the Minions generating even more cash through their merchandise, the spin-off was always going to happen.

Because of this success, and the fact that Universal was very much aware children can bother and annoy their parents into buying them anything, we were subjected to an overwhelming wave of promotion for Minions from the studio. This saw the Minions plastered on billboards, on the sides of buses, and even on an array of confectionary. The most impressive promotional push saw the Minions and an oversized banana take over the roof of the Pacific Theatre’s Cinerama Dome on Sunset Boulevard. Basically if you didn’t watch Minons at the theatre below then you didn’t watch it at all.

As most moviegoers assumed it would be, the common critical consensus for Minions was that it didn’t match the enjoyment levels of its predecessors for the same reason that most television spin-offs fail – they were fun in small doses but having to spend an entire film with them proved to be brutal. The mediocre critical reaction didn’t matter, though. Because the fact that six-year-olds repeatedly made their increasingly depressed parents take them to see Minions resulted in it grossing even more than both Despicable Me and Despicable Me 2, as it amassed $1.157 billion at the box office. Capitalism at its finest.