I actually picked up 3 books at the library today. I'm sorry to say I haven't been there in years. I read one already (only 160 pages) called "two whole cakes." The next one is "real gorgeous." They're both books on body image and learning to accept ur body since I have real issues with that

I know how you feel. Thing is none of the stuff we think will make it all better does.

When I was young I was alone and depressed. Now I'm married, and I STILL get like you're feeling these days! Now, DH isn't the best at cheering people up (well not ME anyway.) so that's neither here nor there.

I think the key is finding out why we feel so bad and not letting others dictate our mood. It's hard and I haven't mastered it myself.

You can PM me if you'd like. If I don't respond right away I'm not ignoring you. I just forget to check it sometimes. But I'm available to listen ( read) to your problems.

Originally Posted by BlackAngelPlayah

What's DH? Something husband? I always think that finding a guy who likes me will make me feel better, but I guess I shouldn't. I want to be happy without one too, but I never have been. The only ones I've dated or talked to have all treated me poorly and I always put the blame on myself for not being good enough :-/

If you constantly tell yourself that you are not good enough and that you don't deserve a loving relationship, I'm afraid that those thoughts and beliefs have become true for you, because that is what you have been telling your mind repeatedly.

Try saying a few positive affirmations throughout the day that will make you feel good. You don't have to believe what you are telling yourself at this moment, but with practice/repetition your mind will start to believe the new, positive thought.

Having a companion is nice but I wouldn't rely on anyone to make you happy. Happiness comes from within. I know, that's so cliche, lol.

If you constantly tell yourself that you are not good enough and that you don't deserve a loving relationship, I'm afraid that those thoughts and beliefs have become true for you, because that is what you have been telling your mind repeatedly.

Try saying a few positive affirmations throughout the day that will make you feel good. You don't have to believe what you are telling yourself at this moment, but with practice/repetition your mind will start to believe the new, positive thought.

Having a companion is nice but I wouldn't rely on anyone to make you happy. Happiness comes from within. I know, that's so cliche, lol.

Hey ive had depression since I was quite young as well and I was recently diagnosed with bipolar 2. I know when youre depressed there never seems to be any light at the end of the tunnel but you just gotta take it on faith that there is. Try to be functional hon, thats what I di. Just fo through the motions if you can. If not cry, write, PM me if you want.

If you constantly tell yourself that you are not good enough and that you don't deserve a loving relationship, I'm afraid that those thoughts and beliefs have become true for you, because that is what you have been telling your mind repeatedly.

Try saying a few positive affirmations throughout the day that will make you feel good. You don't have to believe what you are telling yourself at this moment, but with practice/repetition your mind will start to believe the new, positive thought.

Having a companion is nice but I wouldn't rely on anyone to make you happy. Happiness comes from within. I know, that's so cliche, lol.

Hey ive had depression since I was quite young as well and I was recently diagnosed with bipolar 2. I know when youre depressed there never seems to be any light at the end of the tunnel but you just gotta take it on faith that there is. Try to be functional hon, thats what I di. Just fo through the motions if you can. If not cry, write, PM me if you want.

I know how you feel. Thing is none of the stuff we think will make it all better does.

When I was young I was alone and depressed. Now I'm married, and I STILL get like you're feeling these days! Now, DH isn't the best at cheering people up (well not ME anyway.) so that's neither here nor there.

I think the key is finding out why we feel so bad and not letting others dictate our mood. It's hard and I haven't mastered it myself.

You can PM me if you'd like. If I don't respond right away I'm not ignoring you. I just forget to check it sometimes. But I'm available to listen ( read) to your problems.

Originally Posted by BlackAngelPlayah

What's DH? Something husband? I always think that finding a guy who likes me will make me feel better, but I guess I shouldn't. I want to be happy without one too, but I never have been. The only ones I've dated or talked to have all treated me poorly and I always put the blame on myself for not being good enough :-/

Originally Posted by sKorpio1190

Supposed to be "Darling Husband." Though they don't always live up to that sentiment.

Anyway, the last thing you want I to get a guy and always feel like you have to prove to him that you're good enough. Because you never will. You are great, but he'll use that insecurity to make you do things because you feel you have to.

Girl I have done storied I could tell you about looking for a man to make it better. SMH.

I know how you feel. Thing is none of the stuff we think will make it all better does.

When I was young I was alone and depressed. Now I'm married, and I STILL get like you're feeling these days! Now, DH isn't the best at cheering people up (well not ME anyway.) so that's neither here nor there.

I think the key is finding out why we feel so bad and not letting others dictate our mood. It's hard and I haven't mastered it myself.

You can PM me if you'd like. If I don't respond right away I'm not ignoring you. I just forget to check it sometimes. But I'm available to listen ( read) to your problems.

Originally Posted by BlackAngelPlayah

What's DH? Something husband? I always think that finding a guy who likes me will make me feel better, but I guess I shouldn't. I want to be happy without one too, but I never have been. The only ones I've dated or talked to have all treated me poorly and I always put the blame on myself for not being good enough :-/

Originally Posted by sKorpio1190

Supposed to be "Darling Husband." Though they don't always live up to that sentiment.

Anyway, the last thing you want I to get a guy and always feel like you have to prove to him that you're good enough. Because you never will. You are great, but he'll use that insecurity to make you do things because you feel you have to.

Girl I have done storied I could tell you about looking for a man to make it better. SMH.

Originally Posted by BlackAngelPlayah

Dunno why I always want a guy in my life. I just can't help but see women (friends included) in relationships, or being pursued by guys, or flirted with by guys, etc and wonder what makes me such a bad person that no one will give me the time of day. Granted I'm not the best looking woman out there but damn, I'm not a bad person either :-/

I am horrible at the feeling but maybe if you got a pet. It doesn't have to be a cat or a dog but something small even like a ferret or a hamster or a rabbit. I feel like my dog has taught me a lot about love and acceptance. He gives me something to live for and I never come home to an empty house.

I am horrible at the feeling but maybe if you got a pet. It doesn't have to be a cat or a dog but something small even like a ferret or a hamster or a rabbit. I feel like my dog has taught me a lot about love and acceptance. He gives me something to live for and I never come home to an empty house.

I used to have 2 cats and a horse. I've noticed I've become more sad after having to let them go from my life. I'm in an employment situation now where I can't even have a dog. Dammit, it's depressing when I start focusing on what I can't & don't have rather than what I do have. I guess I need a waaa'mbulance, lol!

I used to have 2 cats and a horse. I've noticed I've become more sad after having to let them go from my life. I'm in an employment situation now where I can't even have a dog. Dammit, it's depressing when I start focusing on what I can't & don't have rather than what I do have. I guess I need a waaa'mbulance, lol!

I've struggled on and off with depression, too. I've gone through periods like what you are describing.

My advice:
Meditate. I know it might sound "stupid" but it helps. You don't have to chant or anything weird like that. You can just close your eyes, breathe deeply, and focus only on that.

Exercise helps. It doesn't have to be vigorous. Just stretching and walking. Bike riding. Yoga is great. Whatever you enjoy.

Diet makes a difference, too. I was told to cut back on caffeine. I didn't. Lol! But certain foods can help. Things high in magnesium are good. I eat almonds daily. DARK chocolate covered raisins. Leafy greens. Raw (or lightly cooked) veggies. Fruits. TONS of water.

You say you only have a couple of friends - and I won't pull the "go out and meet new people" thing on you, though that's always good to do I guess. But cherish the relationships you do have. Make time for those people and spend time with them.

Escapism is good sometimes. If you enjoy reading, getting lost in a good story is always helpful. Or rent a good series from netflix.

Always remember when you are in these "lows" how you feel when NOT in them, and that they do pass.

I hope you are seeing a counselor. I understand you've been on several meds with little success. If you are still seeing the same Dr you might think of going to another for a 2nd opinion. Maybe they know of a better med or a combination that might be more suited to you.

I'm terribly sorry you are dealing with this. I have seen many people deal with it, have dealt with it myself, and recently witnessed a student of mine have a mental breakdown before my eyes.

Mental health has got to stop being something we look down on or feel ashamed of, and be something we respect and treat as much as any other medical condition!!

Trust me girl I feel you. Recently upped my zoloft and added xanax for panic attacks and I'm still having trouble. Unfortunately I don't have words of wisdom, but just wanted to let you know you're not alone.