This was so my favorite song of this album upon first listen. Then the album became just…amazing all around. Listening to this almost makes me mad at Kanye for not putting the good stuff out anymore. (Now see here, I did like 808’s.)

But this morning my trainer was telling me about his coffee addiction and it got me to thinking about how hard it is to stop our addictions. And it’s not always the things that are meant to be addicting. We get how a smoker can’t stop; it’s a chemical addiction. Some people are addicted to shopping, addicted to the internet *raises hand*, addicted to their crackberry *stands up and leaves the room crying*, addicted to sex, addicted to HIM or HER. Our addiction soon becomes our obsession.

It starts off healthy and fun. You like having something to run to, you like having something to hide behind, you like having that person to chase or to love. Then all it takes is one hit of reality and the obsession sets in. You go to work without your phone and you spend the whole day miserable. You went to buy those *Red Bottom* shoes and your C.C. declined. He didn’t call you today. She didn’t stop by after work. Comcast is having issues and your internet isn’t working. This is when the tides turn.

You fight to do all that you can to make sure you NEVER feel that again. You pick up the extra job so you can supplement your spending habits, your phone becomes your third hand, you call, text, email him or her nonstop to make sure they know you LUVVVV them and you just want to make sure everything is ok.

This downward spiral is the worst, but you Just.Can’t.Stop. It’s almost like it sets off endorphins in your body. There’s an adrenalin rush that goes through you at the thought of not having your addiction. It defines you and the addiction itself becomes your newest….obsession.

Outside of my phone and my sexy Macbook, I used to be addicted to him, but I weened myself off. I tell myself never to let someone get *that* close again until we’ve jumped the broom, but you never know, addiction loves to sneak up on you.

addiction |əˈdik sh ən|
noun
the fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity

I used to wake up on Saturdays to the sounds of Al Green or Luther or Tina Turner and the smell of Pine Sol. Those memories about have me in tears. My mom would blast that good music while cleaning the house. I’d get up and meet her in the kitchen, dance around with her and then eat me some good cereal before my cartoons started up.

Now, this is what is supposed to wake me up.

I’m not going to use this time to talk about my love/hate relationship with S Beezy and all ATL music. I’m just using that song as an example of how things have changed and how sad it makes me.

The state of maintstream music (i’ll just say Black Music.. because Coldplay, Oasis, most European groups, etc, still have my heart) today makes me really sad and makes me feel old. I’m too young to have abandoned the radio and the clubs. I’m too young to be out of the loop with the newest sounds, dances, and music related trends. I work at a bar on the weekends, so I’m often exposed to it unwillingly and it’s always a shock to my senses. Hip Hop today is all about the beats. Lyrically it sounds worse than a small 3 y/o trying to string together sentences to let their parents know they just pooped a big one. It’s a mess to say the least. Hip Hop has always been about the sound, but it was just one element. The DJ handled his/her part, the MC did his/her thing, the Grafitti artist was tagging in the background, and the dancer was body rockin. Today, Casio and Autotunes rules the record and the “MC” is saaaaaaaaaannnngggin like thissssssss “yeeaaaaaa gettin monnnnnnanaaaayyy ooooooohhhhhhhh” WTHeck!? Not to mention the dances these days. Stankey Leg? Swag Surfin? Superman/Batman/Spiderman/Juwannaman/I’m not really a man- A Hoe? Crank Dat Anything-you-can-think-of-in-30-seconds?

What’s really going on? I almost can’t take it, and it’s turning this 24 y/o into a serious homebody! But before I get beside myself and forget where I’m from. I give you a lil bit of my homestate flavor and when I’m home in FL you will see me hit it.