Getting gorgeous and getting even: This here is a spite-fueled diet and exercise plan.

*spiteful cackle*

You know how overweight women often have two stomach pooches? One is larger and on the bottom and the other is smaller and rests on the top; there’s a crease between the two. I started off having two pooches. Now I just have one. So long, upper pooch! You shall never be seen again! Behold, for now I have only *one* pooch to work off now, and that is positively thrilling. Boo yeah!