Wednesday, August 15, 2012

I can't believe I just discovered this

I like popcorn. I kind of got into it in the 90's when microwave popcorn first got big. I used to not go to the movies much, which is why (1) I have a huge blind spot for movies, meaning I haven't seen a lot of movies that make people go "Wow, you haven't seen that?" when I tell them I've never seen that. I've never seen Sophie's Choice or Dances With Wolves or any of the American Pie series. I just saw Blade Runner a few months ago, and didn't finish it. Wow, I am really, really getting off topic here, and (2) so I got into microwave popcorn first and theater popcorn second.

So microwave popcorn sucks. Only half the kernels ever pop, and it just doesn't have the right texture or taste. So The Wife bought me an air popper which is awesome if you like to chew on styrofoam packing peanuts.

Then I saw this article about making popcorn on the stove like our ancestors did and I tried it last night and HOLY SHIT I HAVE FOUND THE SOLUTION TO POPCORN. It was so fucking good. I literally can't wait to go home tonight and do it again.

Here's the recipe, if you can even call it a recipe, from the linked article above:

1. Put the oil in an 8-inch saucepan over medium-high heat. (If you’re using another size saucepan, just use enough oil to cover the bottom in a very thin but unbroken layer.) Add the popcorn; the bottom of the pan should be covered in a single layer of kernels. Cover partially and cook undisturbed until the kernels begin popping. Once the corn is popping in earnest, give the pan an occasional shake.

2. When the popping slows to the point that there’s an interval of 1 to 2 seconds between each pop, remove the pan from the heat and transfer the popcorn to a bowl. Season with salt and serve immediately.

(1-3 servings my ass. 1-1 1/2 servings, more like.)

I mean, GUH-DOI, why did it take me 25 years of popcorn eating to finally realize you could make it like this?

I worked at a movie theater for eight years, and I never got tired to eating movie theater popcorn. I got tired of smelling like movie theater popcorn. I would go to a bar after work and eventually someone would say, "Why does it smell like popcorn in here?" But I digress.

I think microwave popcorn is fine, but it's not my favorite. My husband bought me a Whirley Pop (check it out on Amazon). The popcorn is so good!

I've ALWAYS eaten stove-top popcorn. Microwave popcorn is for chumps. Growing up popcorn was our go-to snack. I even have a pot dedicated to making popcorn. I consider my job as a parent almost complete. I've taught my oldest to make coffee, and to make popcorn on the stove.

Yeah, it's totally A Thing, one that is also sometimes dinner because it feels like cooking a real meal.

I actually take a different approach to the timing of the kernels so that they all pop: Put the oil in with just three kernels. When those testers pop, THEN put in the rest and there will be no stragglers.

I'm with ap, gussy that stuff up with some nutritional yeast or furikake or swedish fish and you'll never get tired of it.

I grew up on Jiffy Pop, which is basically the same thing, but with the added excitement of watching the foil on top of the pan slowly expand. My parents didn't buy popcorn in the theater because it's kind of a ripoff, so I don't really associate popcorn with movies.

About Me

TK lives and works in San Francisco. He occasionally travels to places east of the Caldecott Tunnel, but not very often. His interests include bars, reality TV, and irony. Things seem to be going fine.