Keep Paris Hilton In The Slammer

It has come to my attention that there are some sick puppies in this world (http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/PH21781/) who would like for Paris Hilton to evade her 45-day jail term for driving under the influence.
THESE PEOPLE ARE SICK AND WRONG.
This petition is my humble attempt to keep the wonky-eyed bint safely locked up for her full prison sentence.
My reasons for her sticking in the slammer are thus:
1) She obviously can\'t drive. If she could she wouldn\'t have got caught in the first place.
2) She could have killed someone.
3) Did I mention her wonky eye
4) If she was a young ethnic minority in LA her sentence would have been a lot more severe.
5) She\'s a bit too orange and botoxed for my liking. If she\'s banged away for 45 days we get to see what she REALLY looks like.
Okay that\'s all.

Sponsor

I am a disgruntled self-rightous individual who is sick of divvies clotting up the gossip columns of my papers and space on my TV.