75

57

71.7

78.2

78.4

.574

.594

21.9%

64.8%

86.7%

-2.7%

-2.8%

The Rays are 11-13 this month because Joe Maddon hasn't let them dress up like superheroes and this is payback, baby.

2

71

62

70.3

69.4

70.6

.529

.549

1.6%

15.6%

17.2%

-2.3%

-16.0%

Good news: Ubaldo Jimenez struck out 10 and walked none. Where's this guy been all season? The bad news: WHERE'S THIS GUY BEEN ALL SEASON?

3

75

59

77.4

77.5

77.7

.574

.554

16.2%

78.2%

94.4%

-1.0%

-2.8%

If Brandon Phillips was to second base what he is to raising the level of debate, he'd be lucky to ride the bench in a men's league in Altoona.

4

77

56

72.6

73.5

74.4

.559

.539

27.3%

70.5%

97.9%

-0.9%

-1.4%

John Buck had three hits. Put a new uniform on the guy and he goes nuts. The Pirates should wear new uniforms every game. Not because of Buck. Because eventually they'd run out and have to dress like clowns and that would be funny.

5

75

58

74.2

73.8

72.0

.554

.574

21.3%

62.1%

83.4%

-0.9%

17.7%

The A's lost to Detroit 7-6, but Oakland only used 14 players while Detroit used 17 so on a per-player basis Oakland actually won.

81.1

80.1

79.4

.592

.611

76.3%

20.8%

97.1%

-0.8%

4.7%

60

72

62.2

60.8

60.2

.461

.441

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Former Phils manager Charlie Manual was spotted in the Mets dugout wearing a Bobby Valentine mask. Make of that what you will.

8

61

73

54.9

54.9

56.8

.425

.405

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Leadoff hitter Michael Young has a .329 on-base percentage and one stolen base.

9

57

75

56.0

58.1

58.6

.435

.455

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Later, 28,012 Minnesotans claimed they were doing something else.

10

59

74

60.2

63.1

64.4

.464

.444

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

By beating the Pirates, Milwaukee kept Pittsburgh from tying for first place. And ho, they DID sleep on a bed of tears and sadness and misgivings, and lo, it was comfortable, and they DID make snores to wake the Gods.

11

60

73

57.2

58.7

59.0

.442

.422

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

In a change of pace, the Western Metal Supply Company at Petco Park will now sell western metal supplies. Said CEO Jack Goatersly ,"This baseball thing just ain't working."

12

60

73

55.1

59.1

58.8

.438

.458

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Mariners played in Hou don't care Taijuan Walker: T-minus a few hours!

13

59

74

56.9

61.3

62.3

.450

.430

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Searching for a reason behind the Giants season and stumbled across this. Last season the Giants were last in home runs. This season, they're second to last. Ah-HA!

14

44

89

48.0

42.9

45.2

.339

.357

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

You just gotta believe

15

60

74

61.5

59.8

61.8

.454

.474

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Alex Anthopoulos: If I've learned one lesson from this season, itís that John Gibbons definitely isn't the right guy to manage this team to a World Series... of poker!

16

63

72

66.0

65.9

62.6

.477

.457

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

While I was working on this, a giant raccoon appeared on my porch. The animal kingdom has spoken. The Rockies will miss the playoffs! Also, they'll have a hunk of that stale bread, please.

56

76

58.8

58.8

58.0

.439

.458

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The White Sox have the worst on-base percentage in the American League. There's a good reason though. They mixed up research on on-base percentage with a recent study on smoking. On-base percentage may win games, but it gives you cancer. No thanks!

19

60

72

62.7

65.6

64.6

.479

.499

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Only three teams have more hits than the Angels: Colorado, St. Louis, and Texas.

20

49

83

51.6

47.6

48.5

.372

.354

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The player with the highest batting average in last nightís Marlins lineup was Donovan Solano who is hitting .251/.305/.303. In unrelated news, the Marlins were shut out for a MLB-leading 16th time.

21

81

52

81.5

81.0

78.5

.605

.586

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Brian McCann will sign a long-term contract for lots of money. I took that phrase and translated it to Greek then to Arabic then to Dutch, then to Japanese then back to English. As such, I can report to you that, this off-season Brian McCann will conclude long term for shellfish.

22

78

55

82.0

78.2

77.3

.593

.574

56.5%

42.9%

99.4%

0.1%

0.8%

The Cardinals lead the National League in runs scored with 645. They're also the only NL team to score over 581. (Was going to say 600 but 581 is lower!)

23

78

55

73.4

76.1

74.1

.567

.547

99.5%

0.2%

99.7%

0.1%

0.2%

Yasiel Puig for President! Wait, did you see the way he walked out of the dugout? SUSPEND THAT LOAFER!

24

78

55

76.0

75.2

74.1

.570

.590

78.7%

18.3%

97.0%

0.2%

4.2%

Ron Washington was spotted at a local diner where he went in the emergency door, ordered dessert for dinner, and ate it with the wrong side of a spoon. Yes, itís getting to be playoff time and olí Wash is practicing making bad decisions.

25

70

63

65.8

58.9

60.2

.479

.499

0.3%

3.8%

4.1%

0.4%

-5.5%

If Joe Girardi gets this group to the playoffs, he doesn't just deserve Manager of the Year, he deserves Manager of Managers of the Year. Not Manager of the Year of Managers of the Year though. That's going too far.

26

68

64

67.6

65.6

65.8

.506

.486

0.5%

2.9%

3.3%

0.5%

-1.1%

Justin Upton got hurt? See! I told you everything would come up Towers.

89.9

89.1

.635

.653

98.3%

1.0%

99.3%

0.6%

0.3%

69

64

71.0

63.9

64.8

.505

.525

0.1%

1.4%

1.5%

0.7%

0.6%

Baseball loves to lie to us. But sometimes it tells us the truth. Bruce Chen's 2.79 ERA isn't either. It's a hallucination. Just like those sharks swimming around under the carpet.

29

68

65

65.5

65.9

65.3

.498

.478

0.0%

5.3%

5.3%

1.2%

4.2%

Last season 19-year-old Bryce Harperís OPS was .817. This seasonís as a 20-year-old itís .902. By the time heís 100 in 2093, Harperís OPS will be 7.702! Canít wait for that!

30

71

61

70.0

67.7

68.9

.526

.546

1.5%

12.2%

13.7%

4.9%

-3.2%

Chris Tillman won again. He's probably the best starter on the Orioles now. Remember where Baltimore got him? From Seattle for Erik Bedard along with Adam Jones, George Sherrill, and someone named Tony Butler who, considering this deal, is a lock for the Hall of Fame.