Quick show of hands: Who here is brave about schooling people when they say "that's so gay" or toss around the word "faggot" in a less than queer-friendly sort of way?

This was the second week in a row when I overheard the young people in line near me tossing around these terms. Last week it was the vapid girls in front of me, referring to something or someone as "so gay." This week it was the drunk guys behind me, referring to someone as a faggot (they may or may not have been referring to the other drunk dudes they'd very nearly gotten into a fight with -- I no longer recall).

This week I knew I wasn't going to say anything, primarily because they were guys and they were guys who I perceived to be drunk (at least drunk when they first arrived). But last week? Last week I really could have said something without having to fear for my safety.

Maybe it was the fact of the SNL line. I mean, first off, when these comments were thrown around, it wasn't like I could school these folks and then walk away -- I was in line for tickets and so were they. We were all committed to being near each other for at least a few more hours. And speaking of SNL, I am so not trying to get into a fight there. This week Paris greeted me with a hug and a kiss -- I love that. If the staff of SNL ever have cause to talk about me, I want to be referred to as "that really nice/polite/friendly woman who's here all the time," not "that crazy lady who got into the fight with the college dudes."

But not saying anything makes me feel like a heel. Maybe I need to sit and watch that Wanda Sykes video about a hundred times, so I feel fully confident and ready to speak.

"That's so gay" doesn't seem to have much relation in people's minds with gay people any longer. I have friends who use if all the time around me, and they're resolutely anti-homophobic.

It's difficult to tell people off or using offensive language, or displaying offensive attitudes.It's probably safer in a crowd though, where the likelihood of getting your head kicked in is much lower. I'd have been like you though, and just kept quiet.