Ask Sam letter

To Sam11 May 2016

How to give someone advice

Hello,

lately my cousin, who is also my best friend, has been having panic attacks, well at the start they were, but theyve changed into kind of 'episodes' where she cant calm down and she gets sooo angry, she punched a wall the other day for literally no reason, she also hasnt been sleeping at all and she has been seeing things like spiders crawling on her when theres nothing there! she cant calm down ever and all days have been bad days for almost a month now, she has her gcse's coming up and im running out of things to try help her. :(

anything you could say would be helpful thanks :)

Sam12 May 2016

Hi,

It can be really worrying if one of your family or friends is having problems, but youve done really well to get in touch and get advice about helping them.

Managing feelings and emotions can sometimes be difficult. The way we feel can affect everything we do. Anxiety is really common, and can start off as a simple worry. But this can grow into a panic which can sometimes lead to panic attacks. Panic attacks can seem scary for the person experiencing it or watching but its important to remember that no physical harm can come from having one. We have helpful advice on how to control panic attacks.

It's natural to feel angry sometimes. But it can start to become a problem if someone is hitting or physically hurting themselves. There are lots of reasons why your cousin might be feeling angry. And it could help to talk to them about how they deal with their feelings. You could also encourage them to take a look at the message boards where other young people have shared helpful advice about coping with anger.

Letting your cousin know youre there for them if they want to talk shows that you want to help and support them. But dont be upset if they dont feel ready to talk to you. It can sometimes be very difficult to talk about whats wrong. They may feel scared or worried about what will happen if they do talk. If they dont want to talk to you, you could try to encourage them to talk to an adult they trust like a relative, teacher or doctor about whats happening. And they can always talk to one of our counsellors.

If you feel like your friend might be in danger or youre really worried about them, you could tell an adult, like a parent or a teacher, even if your friend doesnt want to talk to anyone.

You sound like a really caring person but its important to make sure that youre also looking after yourself while supporting your friend. You can always speak to a counsellor in confidence. They're here to listen and support you.

Take care,Sam

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