Use the right tool for the right job. Grep harder. Appeal to authority. Fowler invocation asserting Turing completeness. That's not NP complete. Try to grok harder.

UR doing it wrong

I suggest you try it again. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct. Finding a needle in a haystack isn't hard when every straw is computerized. Spare me your space age technobabble, Attila the Hun! Soothe us with sweet lies.

There's a cat in that computer. It's running a custom Mint Distro. That's a meme!

Use the right tool for the right job. SRSLY. Down-voted into oblivion. Obscure Spolsky link justifying contrarian position.. It's a Atwoodian tautology.

Accusations of intellectual dishonesty

Off-handed reference to FizzBuzz, dreamy reminiscence of Programming Pearls, reference to my first Altair and frustration at the current state of affairs.

CmdrTaco name drop, dig at Digg, Y-Combinator sour grapes. I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks *and* blows. Yes, if you make it look like an electrical fire. It's a go-cart, powered by my own sense of self-satisfaction.

Reference to pointless diagram and misplaced frustration at Large Company. Comment directed at patent trolls combined with acerbic witty statement with regards to Lessig and software patents pointlessness.

About Scott

Scott Hanselman is a former professor, former Chief Architect in finance, now speaker, consultant, father, diabetic, and Microsoft employee. He is a failed stand-up comic, a cornrower, and a book author.

long-winded comment attacking the "young-ens", declaring their rubies, gems, perls and all other stones to be garbage! Oh if only development were the way development used to be. Maybe even a smattering of assembly code thrown in for good measure.

Completely superflous comment that I insist on making solely for the purpose of feeling like I have something to contribute to a conversation that is above my head and outside of my personal area of expertise.

Random never-ending statement completely unrelated to the post. But I must explain to you how all this mistaken idea of denouncing pleasure and praising pain was born and I will give you a complete account of the system, and expound the actual teachings of the great explorer of the truth, the master-builder of human happiness. No one rejects, dislikes, or avoids pleasure itself, because it is pleasure, but because those who do not know how to pursue pleasure rationally encounter consequences that are extremely painful. Nor again is there anyone who loves or pursues or desires to obtain pain of itself, because it is pain, but because occasionally circumstances occur in which toil and pain can procure him some great pleasure. To take a trivial example, which of us ever undertakes laborious physical exercise, except to obtain some advantage from it? But who has any right to find fault with a man who chooses to enjoy a pleasure that has no annoying consequences, or one who avoids a pain that produces no resultant pleasure? On the other hand, we denounce with righteous indignation and dislike men who are so beguiled and demoralized by the charms of pleasure of the moment, so blinded by desire, that they cannot foresee.

Hi My Name is JACK WALKER. I'm a specialist recruiter always searching for THE BEST IN THE INDUSTRY and always on the look for someone with MAD NINJA SKILLZ (and I've read in a book I believe I bought via an Amazon top 20 list - or was it in SLC airport that you need to seem FRESH to be attractive?) in JAVA, c# and if you're really good at PROGRAMMING HTML it would be awesome. Would you mind send me your CV?

Huge block of code with rewrite of code sample to get it to "work" in some other circumstances. Decades later, frantic Google-Search-Copy-Paste certified developers will try this code when the above code doesn't work for them.

This code in fact does compile, but introduces a severe logic and / or security bug.

Comment from sysadmin gods telling you that this is a duplicate and a link to said duplicate with different question. Your entry will be removed right after a few other people have commented telling you what a fool you are that you did not google it first. Thus blaming you for sites lack of searchable content.

Hey!!!! You say that this blog is about CONVERSATIONS but why do you MODERATE?!?! I'm a super important socialmedia guru and actually too busy to post on your niche blog, but I actually made an exception throwing characters of digital puke and you should be happy.

Mention of insight into my new world view which is my new religion that you can be a part of for 22.95. Link to said religion. Sideways comment to previously mentioned pharmaceuticals and other radicals that should be destroyed.

"Title of the Song" by Da Vinci's NotebookDeclaration of my feelings for youElaboration on those feelingsDescription of how long these feelings have existedBelief that no one else could feel the same as I

Reminiscence of the pleasant times we sharedAnd our relationship’s perfectionRecounting of the steps that led to our love’s dissolutionMostly involving my unfaithfulness and lies

Penitent admission of wrongdoingDiscovery of the depth of my affectionRegret over the lateness of my epiphany

CHORUSTitle of the songNaïve expression of loveReluctance to accept that you are goneRequest to turn back timeAnd rectify my wrongsRepetition of the title of the song

Enumeration of my various transgressive actionsOf insufficient motivationRealization that these actions led to your departureAnd my resultant lack of sleep and appetite

Renunciation of my past insensitive behaviorPromise of my reformationReassurance that you still are foremost in my thoughts nowNeed for instructions how to gain your trust again

Request for reconciliationListing of the numerous tasks that I’d performOf physical and emotional compensation

CHORUS

Acknowledgment that I acted foolishlyIncreasingly desperate pleas for your returnSorrow for my infidelityVain hope that my sins are forgivableAppeal for one more opportunityDrop to my knees to elicit crowd responsePrayers to my chosen deityModulation and I hold a high note…

I'm going to unfollow you on Twitter now. I think it's not only important that you know this, but I expect you to feel a reasonable level of guilt for leaving me no other choice based on your actions that I won't point out without using ALL CAPS.

Shaun

Thursday, December 15, 2011 10:41:02 PM UTC

Post announcing that I'm signing off for tonight, but that I will return tomorrow to reply to all counterarguments to my argument expressed here, thinking that you all actually care and will return to here to bask in my wisdom.

TorgoGuy

Thursday, December 15, 2011 10:42:22 PM UTC

INSANE IRRELEVANT POLITICAL RANT. MISTRUTHS ARRIVED AT BY CIRCULAR LOGIC. EXHORTATION FOR YOU TO WAKE UP AND GET THE FACTS!!!!

Over-eager developer trying to earn MVP status, who has just created a CodePlex project to try to address the issues in the OP, and posts <link to said project> with invitation to everyone to please help contribute!

"Comment about how it is absolutely absurd that once again the user interface here has been redesigned and I'm being forced to use a different view of a service that I pay nothing for."

^^^ This!!

-e

Espen Andreassen

Thursday, December 15, 2011 11:53:50 PM UTC

This starts an interesting discussion but I can't be bothered to paste it here so I'm posting the link to my blog that noone ever heard about. Here it is: link-bait hacker slash news not dot com <.........>...

Smug comment pointing out that the post misses the essence without providing a supporting argument.

Stacy

Thursday, December 15, 2011 11:58:34 PM UTC

l o l

bartek

Thursday, December 15, 2011 11:59:18 PM UTC

Appreciative comment on blog in general. List of agreed points and unsolicited personal opinion. List of disagreements with more unsolicited personal opinion. Point out minor grammatical error. Reaffirming comment to author so as not to appear offensive and apply the sandwich criticism technique.

Wishes the community knew who I was, claims a command-line example is better, it sounded leet. Messes up my 1337 and now sound like a poser. IronRuby-Python, GitHubbers rule, HTTP is really only an implementation of REST, not actually REST. Goes back to writing ASP.NET CRUD app in VB.NET with DataGrids, hard core postbacks, FTW! Links to own blog, congrats to whoever posted the one, hopes for Adsense revenue.

Meta-comment complaining of all the meta-comments. Explanation that the OP is either a lame joke or 2012's template for all blog posts. Sudden realization of meta-ness. Meta-meta reference. Infinite loop due to recursion, head 'splode.

Comment praising author and commenters. Claim this is proof of superiority of technology community A over technology community B. Closing claim of platonic affection for all of you. Link to Wikipedia article on <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Platonic_love>Platonic love</a>. Snarky comment on position of article title relative to picture of some random Wikipedia author.

Request for support asking help and email on a technical issue with the dial-up modem, assuming this is the modem product's website/blog.Ex: (Can u plz email me how to solve this **random modem issue** ASAP?)

5 Minutes later,On presumption that no one listened, relentless frustration with the inability to solve the problem, slamming support personnel

Comment by a toadie with hopes that you will notice me, maybe recognize me from previous comments, and hopefully trigger some response from you. Crossing my fingers that someone will follow the link to my blog and like something I have written myself.

Angry comment stating that I, TorgoGuy, *obviously* am not HosieryMarionette and further stating "how dare you question my integrity". Statement that I'm never coming back to this blog. (Return occurrs two weeks later with no change to the endless trollish pattern.)

HosieryMarionette

Friday, December 16, 2011 2:56:05 PM UTC

Lamentations that I have arrived too late to have my impactful comment read and taken seriously. Heed it anyway.

So I looked at the IL and A and B actually yield the same result, so you won't really see a performance gain using either one. I did that after I used reflector to inspect what Microsoft's code is doing.

Philip

Philip Holly

Friday, December 16, 2011 3:40:39 PM UTC

Comment not so subtly praising myself for actually having read ALL the comments. Snarky statement accusing others of NOT having read ALL the comments. Annoying use of CAPS for emphasis instead of html tags. Gratuitous praise of OP. Longwinded statement bemoaning how we've lost the thread of the conversation. Pointless final statement.

Confusingly useful, insightful, and relevant comment which happens to a spammy URL. Did someone working at that spammy place leave an insightful comment? Was it just spam that happened to look relevant due to complete coincidence? Moderate and wonder about it later?

Scott,Your post is evidence of the vast community-reach your blog has earned you.

Thanks for giving us all with this post, a place to shamelessly act like script-kiddies, trolls, and mega-nerds in the name of cathartic humor. I don't know many authors who would tolerate it much less support such expression.

Rushed warning that comments made by Scott Hanselman (having nothing to do with this actual post) have actually been discovered on a Slash News Dot website and predicting possibly certain inevitable (maybe) crash of his underpowered website and domain host due to overload of webtubes by geek hoards rushing to check out posts...or at least a few bonus hits by cats napping on keyboards.

Obligatory comment from a 3rd-world reader guilting you for living in America and shaming you for assuming that we all have technology x and running version y.

Proceed to tell you to be grateful that you don't have to crank your computer for 30 minutes and run windows 1.0 on a black and white monitor with no mouse and several missing keys and can only use it between 6 am and 7 am on even numbered days...

THIS IS THE WAY-LATE-TO-THE-PARTY COMMENT. IT DEMONSTRATES THAT I DID NOT READ THE COMMENTS ABOVE AS MY POINT REHASHES WHAT WAS ALREADY SAID 4 TIMES (6 IF YOU COUNT INDIVIDUAL POSTS BY TORGOGUY)

I WOULD HAVE POSTED THIS BRILLIANT COMMENT / CALL-TO-ACTION SOONER BUT FACEBOOK / GOOGLE DOCS / WINDOWS 8 / TWITTER / X-BOX / JQUERY PLUGINS / HANSELMAN.COM HAVE ALL CHANGED THEIR LAYOUTS AND I COULDN'T FIND MY WAY AROUND THE SITES TO REPLY WAS BUSY POSTING ANGRY COMMENTS ABOUT THEM FIRST.

Frankly, “link baiting” sounds to me just like “being a good webmaster”. If we want our website to be considered worthwhile, then we need to add content to it that people want to link to naturally. Really appreciable post.