In five years' time, what programming language will I be using? How about in ten?

Predicting the future is always hard. Right now, I think that it's particularly difficult, although some things are clear. The problem is that none of the current leaders have the right genes for what the future is going to throw at us, and of those chasing that do look like they have what it takes to last the course, it's not obvious that any of them will eventually emerge the winner.

In this talk I'll give my considered opinions from observing the trajectories of "competitor" languages to Perl, including why half of them seem to be forking (even if they weren't meaning to), and why it's unclear how any of them are going to cope well in the interesting times that are coming our way soon.

In this talk there will be KNOWN KNOWNS and KNOWN UNKNOWNS. I'll miss out the UNKNOWN UNKNOWNS for obvious reasons. I can't promise to rigidly define the areas of doubt and uncertainty, but I'll do my best.