Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Satisfaction

FROM LORNA: It’s been two years since my son was diagnosed with Autism. If I would have been asked right then and there if I were satisfied, I would have promptly and emphatically said, “No! No way!” I mean, who is satisfied with that? At the time I was absolutely devastated.

Skip forward two years and that is precisely the question I was asked to ponder. Well, it wasn’t really a question, per se, but a statement. “You must be so satisfied, all the work you’ve done, and the time you’ve put in.”

In all honesty, I was a bit disarmed by the statement. Satisfied. Hmm. What did that mean to me? I had never thought about it quite in that way. Was I satisfied?

My response, in the moment, was to have my eyes tear up a bit and I said, “Yes. Yes, I am.” But the statement has been on my mind ever since. The fact of the matter is, I’ve been “satisfied” the moment I returned from my very first Son-Rise Program® training at The Option Institute.

Yes, my son has made great progress in his socialization. I do love seeing him interact with people. It hasn’t always been that way. However, the moment I finally understood everything about Autism and the moment I began to love and accept him for exactly who he was, I was SATISFIED. More than satisfied. I was crazy about this little boy and I was looking forward to the process of teaching him. I can say with all honesty that even if he never made any so-called “progress,” I would be satisfied. The process of playing with him in his Son-Rise playroom has been satisfaction personified. It’s been fun, and no matter what the outcome, it has irrevocably changed me.

It has taught me that I can be “satisfied” with anything in my life. It’s all in what I believe about it. I believed in so many false “truths” about Autism before I came to that magical place on the mountain. The place where miracles really do happen.

It has reinforced in me the belief that being in the moment is a path to pure bliss. Certainly that has been the case with my beautiful boy and all that he has brought to my life.

But, most importantly, I think, playing with my child the way that I do, has taught me how to love. How to really, REALLY love.