Comedian Hal Cruttenden reveals how his family inspire his stand-up routine.. and he tips Kevin Bridges for greatness

09:56, 28 Aug 2015

ByJohn Dingwall

THE English comic, who was nominated for Best Newcomer at the 2002 Edinburgh Comedy Awards, is going down a storm at the Pleasance Courtyard.

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Hal Cruttenden

HAL CRUTTENDEN is bursting with confidence during his sell-out run at the Edinburgh Fringe – a far cry from when he played to just eight people during an early visit to the capital.

Having been nominated for Best Newcomer at the 2002 Edinburgh Comedy Awards, his latest show, Straight Outta Cruttenden, is going down a storm at the Pleasance Courtyard.

But the softly spoken Englishman, now established as one of the UK’s best stand-up comedians, struggled to prove himself during those early trips to Scotland.

“I’m playing a much bigger room because I have done it all,” Hal said. “I had an audience of eight in 2003 but It was a brilliant gig. I hugged all of them.

“I don’t have to worry about that now. Some people are fans, so I’m not having to win everybody over. And I do think I’m getting better as a comic.”

Cruttenden, who grew up in London, includes his wife and two teenage daughters in his routine.

He said: “I do a joke about being in bed with my wife and her saying, ‘Take me now’ in her terrifying Northern Irish accent.

“All the jokes are about her being a terrifying Northern Irish woman. None of it is true but she said, ‘I really hate that’.

“A lot of people are scared of my wife. She’s lovely but when she is angry, the accent kicks in. It’s a bit like a Glasgow accent. It has that something extra.

“She met a mum at school who said she had seen my act on TV and was a bit scared of her. My wife came back and said, ‘Look what you’ve done’. I have created a bit of a monster. But my kids love the show and think they write my act.”

Scott Campbell/Getty Images

Hal at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in 2013

As well as writing for The Omid Djalili Show and The Rob Brydon Show, Hal has popped up on Mock the Week and Have I Got News for You, as well as last year’s Live at the Referendum with Kevin Bridges.

Hal said: “We are sad that people in Scotland want to leave but I think we’re heading that way. I do a line in the act where I say, ‘I’m so sad about it. All I just think is why, why, why can’t it be Northern Ireland?’

“I said that to my wife during the referendum and she was really fed-up with it. With Northern Ireland, it would be, ‘OK, bye’. It’s kind of flattering that with Scotland we care so much.”

In October, Hal will be back in Scotland as part of a UK tour. His dates include Aberdeen Lemon Tree, Edinburgh The Stand and Glasgow The Stand.

“I really like Glasgow,” he said.

“There is that reputation of it being hard for comics. It’s kind of rubbish. If you go to Glasgow and you are honest about who you are, you’ll have a great time.”

Hal believes Britain is going through a golden age of comedy with Frankie Boyle and Bridges among the best of the pack.

He added: “There are a lot of people around now who will be famous in 30 or 40 years. I do like Frankie Boyle. He is very knowledgeable and always knows enough about a situation. He is a very wise man.

“A lot of comedians slag off Michael McIntyre because he is not seen as cool.

“But Frankie pointed out that no comedian wants to follow Michael McIntyre in a club because he is such a good club comedian.

“Kevin Bridges is going to be one of the best comedians in Britain ever. He is so accessible and clever and he’s bright.”

Having studied acting, Hal had bit parts on EastEnders and Kavanagh QC in the 1990s and he voiced BBC traffic reports.

He said: “I got the odd part and was doing traffic reports at the BBC. When a colleague suggested I do stand-up, I thought, ‘Not for me’. I couldn’t bear the idea of people shouting at me. I thought, ‘I’m too camp and too middle-class. They’ll rip me apart’.

“Then he gave me a VHS of Eddie Izzard and I thought, ‘If that man can be that middle-class with make-up on and go out there and not apologise, I can do this’.

“I was 27, had just split up with my girlfriend and my confidence was low when I did my first comedy gig at a restaurant in Notting Hill.

“It was a middle-class crowd who were very supportive and it went really well. If it had gone badly, I’d never have done it again. It was the only brave thing I’ve ever done in my life. Making people laugh is so addictive.”

● HAL CRUTTENDEN's Straight Outta Cruttenden is at the Pleasance Courtyard at 9pm until Sunday.

Click on the gallery below to check out 26 words that have a totally different meaning in Scotland.