Old Fic: Sailor Moon fandom (WIP)

Hey, leni_ba! Lookie what I got for ya! I'm getting ready to pack up my computer for the move, so was trolling through my harddrive and found this sucker. Thought you, at least, might appreciate a good laugh. :P

Operation: CourtshipBy Moonbeam

*****Chapter 1: Establishing the Mission Parameters

Sailor Moon screamed, tripping herself unconsciously when she turned to leap away from the dark energy blast the youma directed right at her. Luckily for her, that klutz attack probably saved her life as the energy beam pierced the space her head had been only a scant moment earlier.

Around her she could hear her friends fighting the wicked monster desperately. They'd been at it for what seemed like hours, but was probably more like ten minutes. But the damn youma just wouldn't die! It was too quick for them, it evaded all their attacks with ease. And it's own attacks were just as fast!

Sailor Moon took a moment to look around at her friends, each of them as battered as she was. Off to her left, Sailor Mercury was typing furiously into her computer, searching for some weakness in the youma's defenses. Mars was standing in front of her, a fierce scowl on her face as she launched fireball after fireball at the creature. She was determinedly keeping it distracted and protecting her friend until Mercury could find the key to it's destruction.

"Jupiter Thunder Crash!"

"Venus Crescent Beam Smash!"

Sailor Jupiter and Sailor Venus's attacks were let loose almost simultaneously, from opposing sides of the youma. The bright flash of electricity and pure energy hurtled toward the youma at lightening fast speeds. The Sailor Scouts looked on expectantly as the startled youma glanced nervously in both directions. A moment later there was an explosion of light as Jupiter and Venus's attacks collided.

"Yeah! Way to go, Scouts!" Sailor Moon cheered, as Jupiter pumped her fist in the air and Venus struck her 'V is for Victory' pose.

Their little celebration was cut short, however, when the slightly singed but still very much alive youma laughed evilly from above their heads.

"You think that can stop me, little girls? I'm Electra! I move at the speed of light, there's nothing faster than m--" The youma's boasting was abruptly interrupted by a razor-sharp red rose cutting through the air in front of Electra's eyes. The Negaverse monster inhaled sharply as one the flower's thorns scratched the tip of her nose.

A caped figure jumped down from a nearby rooftop to land beside the gathered Sailor Scouts. His blue eyes glittered dangerously behind his white domino mask as he conjured another deadly rose between his fingers.

"I do. You have come to steal the energy of innocents for the purposes of evil. I will not allow you to succeed!" His voice rose on the last word, and Tuxedo Mask threw the rose with all of his considerable strength at the scowling youma.

Electra easily dodged the petalled projectile, and countered viciously with a dark energy blast that sent the Scouts and Tuxedo Mask scrambling.

"Sheesh. That was effective," Mars commented scornfully, a few close calls later, from her position behind an overturned car she and the others were using for cover. "Any more bright ideas, Cape Boy?"

Before he could retort however, Sailor Moon came to his defense. "That's enough, Mars! At least he was able to get her to stay still for more than a second, which is more than the rest of us have managed." She smiled proudly over at Tuxedo Mask, who returned the look with a small grin of gratitude.

"Of course, that's it!" Mercury's sudden exclamation was perfectly timed to coincide with a momentary lull in the exchange of fire between Scouts and Youma, and was thus heard loudly and clearly by all. They all turned to look at her in confusion.

"Electra's ego! Tuxedo Mask wounded her ego when his rose cut her face, and she stopped to scream at him! If we can just get her mad enough, she'll probably stop fighting altogether so she can yell at us. Then Sailor Moon can moondust her into oblivion!"

They looked at her doubtfully, but another dark energy blast striking the beaten car was all the convincing the group needed to put Mercury's plan to action. Sailor Mars was the first to jump up, so well practiced as she was in the art of teasing Serena that insults to hurl at the Nega-monster came quickly and easily to her.

"Hey, ya big ugly she-devil! You missed me! What, is your aim as bad as that rat's nest of a hair-do of yours? Don't you know looking like a homeless bum went out of style decades ago?!"

Venus jumped up next, landing delicately on top of the car so she could look down her nose snootily at the enraged youma.

"Nah, that's not it Mars. That," she said condescendingly, while waving an absent hand in the increasingly irritated youma's direction, "was never in style. I mean, honestly, look at that dress?! Who in their right mind would ever wear something so gaudy?" Oddly enough, Venus seemed genuinely offended by Electra's rather unique choice in apparellel.

Electra was practically steaming in rage at this point, so that Sailor Jupiter's final words of "How does she ever expect to catch a cool guy looking like that?" were the final straw. The furious Negaverse monster screamed at the top of her lungs in a wail befitting Serena's skill. Then, her concentration too broken to aim anywhere specific, she released a wide spread energy blast to lance wildly through the air.

"Damn!" Jupiter panted, out of breath from having to jump six different ways. "It isn't working! Mercury, do something!"

But Sailor Mercury's ardent reply was interrupted by the still bellowing Electra. "What do you know of beauty, you little Sailor tramps! I can have any guy I want, I'm perfect!"

The youma's distraction gave Tuxedo Mask enough time to step up to Sailor Moon and take her hand in his own. Surprised, she turned to him questioningly. "I have an idea," he whispered to her, his head bent close to her ear. Sailor Moon barely suppressed a shiver of pleasure as his warm breath tickled her neck.

Producing a another perfect crimson rose, Tuxedo Mask gallantly handed the delicate flower to the female warrior with a slight bow. She daintily took it from his fingers, curious about what he was up to.

Since he was still holding her hand, he brought her gloved knuckles up to his lips to kiss them in a gentlemanly fashion. Then he proclaimed, in a voice loud enough that it carried to the fuming youma, "There is far more to perfection than just a beautiful appearance. Though you, dear Moon, can outshine any star in the heavens." A sidelong glance at the incensed youma verified his plan was working. He gave the blushing super-heroine a dazzling smile. "No being, especially that awful youma, could ever detract from your magnificence, sweet angel." Once again, he brushed the back of her hand with his lips and smiled charmingly. Sailor Moon just tried her very best not to swoon too obviously at the look in his sparkling midnight eyes. As it was, it took every ounce of willpower she didn't even know she had just to stay on her feet.

Behind them, Electra shrieked in jealousy. She slowed herself to a standstill as she drew in her energy to launch her strongest attack yet.

She never got the chance.

"Now, Sailor Moon!"

But Tuxedo Mask's prompt was unnecessary, as Sailor Moon was already in motion to call out the attack which would finish Electra off completely.

"Moon Tiara . . ." She swung her arm around gracefully, letting the glowing discus her tiara had become fly from her outstretched fingers with deadly accuracy. "Magic!"

Electra's scream of fury changed unnoticeably to one of fear before she was moondusted out of existence.

"All right!"

"Yeah!"

"Totally cool!"

"We did it!"

"Yes, well done, Sailor Moon. Congratulations, Sailor Scouts. For now. But never forget, the fight with the Negaverse isn't over until they're all destroyed. Don't let your guards down, Scouts!" And Tuxedo Mask vanished in flash of his black cape as he leapt away.

"Well," stated Jupiter thoughtfully, as the Scouts stood together looking off in the direction Tuxedo Mask had just left, "that guy's a real downer, ain't he?"

The others nodded while Sailor Moon just sighed happily, staring off into the distance her dream hunk had vanished into. "He's so romantic..." she said dreamily.

Jupiter smirked. "Girl, you got it bad." Then she ruined it by giggling.

From the shadows above them, a hidden form smiled.

End Chapter 1.*****

Chapter 2 (the next day): Pre-Mission Reconnaissance

"Oh, my god, I'm so late!" A blonde-haired whirlwind dashed through the streets of Tokyo, leaving the citizens in her wake with only the vague impression of a young girl. Those who were close enough to the whirlwind as it passed may have been lucky enough to catch bits and pieces of the disgruntled mutterings falling unchecked from her lips.

The blonde whirlwind, named Serena by her parents but fondly known as Meatball Head to others, expertly dodged the few pedestrians making use of the sidewalks this fine Monday morning; wishing all the while that she was back in bed and happily dreaming of cute little bunnies in pink tutus. "Ooh, it's not fair! Why does school have to start so early in the morning?!" She couldn't help ranting, even though it used up precious oxygen best diverted to her lungs to fuel these ritualistic mornings marathons. Sometimes, she thought, all the running she did trying to get anywhere on time was the only reason she managed to stay in such good shape. Especially with her appetite!

Seeing the last corner before her school came into view looming before her, the petite blonde poured on another blast of speed until she was at an all out sprint. She had only seconds before the bell rang, and she was bound and determined not to get detention today. She and her friends were supposed to have a very important Scout meeting at Raye's after school, and Serena had promised herself that she would not be late. She would be on time for once, and she would pay attention in class so Ms. Haruna wouldn't be able to keep her afterwards. She had it all planned out, the way the whole day would go oh-so perfectly . . .

SMACK!

Her musings were abruptly cut off when the distracted teenager's headlong flight came to a sudden halt on contact with an unexpected wall. A surprisingly strong wall, she automatically noted, as she felt something or someone catch and steady her before she fell from the force of the impact. Her eyes snapped open and Serena tilted her head up to see who she'd run into.

And found herself looking straight into a pair of amused blue eyes. Annoyingly, familiar amused blue eyes. Her own gaze hardened in response to the laughter she saw dancing in his.

"Darien."

"Meatball Head," he returned. Her icy greeting seemed to do little to douse the fire of amusement highlighting his expression as he smirked at her. As far as he was concerned, meeting Serena Tsukino on the street was a guaranteed bout of free entertainment.

Serena's cheeks flushed red with anger at the sound of her hated nickname, but Darien's grin only grew. She looked so cute when she was mad, he couldn't help it. His hands unconsciously tightened their grip on her delicate arms, bringing the glowering girl ever so subtly closer to his body. God, he loved teasing this girl!

There was just no one else like her.

"Listen you miserable excuse for a man, my name is Serena. S-E-R-E-N-A! Come on, say it with me now. It isn't that hard to pronounce," she mocked sweetly. "Even a dumb jerk like yourself ought to be able to get right." She pulled herself away from him, put her hands on her hips, and tapped her foot imperiously while she waited for is response.

It wasn't long in coming. Darien Chiba--renowned man of stoicism and expert of the poker face--took one look at the self-righteous picture she made standing before him and lost it. He burst out laughing, practically doubled over from the force of his mirth. Serena looked on, too enthralled by the unexpected display of emotions to take offence at his laughing at her.

His guffaws eventually calmed to insistent chuckles as his lungs protested in demand of air. Without even bothering to wipe the tears of laughter that trickled their way down his cheeks, he snuck a glance at her from his bent position. He was overwhelmingly pleased to see the pleasant smile gracing her lips as she watched him try to catch his breath.

Still gasping slightly, he carefully straightened up to bestow a gentle smile down on the adorable meatball-headed girl. "God, Serena, you really are the best thing that's ever happened to me."

It took a moment for his words to register, but when they did Serena froze. Then, using her shocked stupor as a moment to escape, he carefully stepped around her before tossing his parting shot.

"Don't ever change, Meatball Head," he whispered seriously in a voice so low she had to strain to hear it.

And then he was gone.

Leaving a still stunned Serena standing in the street with a dumbfounded expression long after the school bell had rung.

End Chapter 2.*****

Chapter 3: Commence Mission

After leaving Serena standing in shock on the street, Darien strolled happily to the Crown Arcade. He couldn't help thinking, that even though his best friend worked there, he'd never spent so much time at an arcade in his life until the day he'd bumped in to the beautiful Meatball Head. She'd had an affect on him instantly.

Remember, mind. It was intended for my lil' cousin when she was 14 years old. (She's almost 18 now. LOL!) So it is kind of, well... ridiculous. Much like the anime itself. ::snerk:: It's a first season, Serena/Darien romance. Haven't worked all the details out yet, but Mina's with the gang and Darien knows who Sailor Moon is -- she doesn't know he's Tuxedo Mask, though -- but no one knows about the Princess, yet.