Vinny: Hey, need a lift?Stacy: Vinny! What are you doing here?Vinny: I was just driving around the neighborhood. Last night I did something– Look, it’s like this. It’s Christmas Day, I’m sitting around my house, right, I’m all alone. . .so, uh, I hop in the limo. . .24 hours later, I wind up in Chicago. And I say to myself, Vincent, where the hell you going? That’s when it hits me. . .I’m coming to see you.Stacy: You drove all that way just to see me?Vinny: Hey, only 4 days and, what, 18 speeding tickets.

Joe: I mean what I said before. You’re really good. . .singing.Donna: Thanks.Joe: Especially since I’ve. . .like, I’ve never heard of you or anything.Donna: Do you watch sports?Joe: Basketball.Donna: Well, there must be basketball players that are really good that you’ve never heard of.Joe: Nope.Donna: No?Joe: No. If they’re professionals, and they’re really good, everybody’s heard of them.Donna: Well, singing is different. It’s a matter of taste. Luck. Whatever.Joe: Oh.

Uncle Wayne: One day you’re gonna wake up with some chick, spooning, you know, thinking about love. And at that moment, you have gotta get up. You do not walk, You do not get your shoes, run the hell out of there. Because maybe not the next day or the next week, but sometime in the future, you’re gonna get crushed. Again. And you don’t wanna feel that way, do you?Teenage Connor: No.Uncle Wayne: No.Connor Mead: Yep.

Hal: Let me ask you something. Who is the all-time love of your life?Mauricio: [ponders] Wonder Woman.Hal: Okay. . .let’s say Wonder Woman falls in love with you. And everyone else in the world didn’t find her attractive.Mauricio: It wouldn’t matter. Because I know they’d be wrong.Hal: See! That’s what I had with Rosemary! I saw a knockout, I don’t care what anybody else saw!Mauricio: I hadn’t thought about it that way. I guess I really did screw you, huh?