Here's an announcement from the editors over at REDBOOK. I know you have great relationship advice, so read through this month's Hard Stuff Q+A, and send your thoughts on the answer to REDBOOK assistant editor Anna Davies at adavies@hearst.com. Your thoughts might appear in print!

Each month, REDBOOK advice guru Karen Karbo helps our readers solve their toughest dilemmas in our column, The Hard Stuff. Now, we'd like to hear what you think about that advice!

Below is a question from one of our readers and Karen Karbo's advice to that reader both of which will appear in an upcoming issue of REDBOOK. We'd love for you to read that question and answer and let us know this: Do you agree with Karen's advice? If so, why do you think it's good advice? Or do you disagree with Karen's advice? If so, why and what advice would you give to this reader instead? Whatever your opinion and advice, we want to hear it!

Your response may be included in an upcoming issue of REDBOOK, so please send your thoughts, along with your full name, age, city, and state, and a photo (photos will run with the responses) to adavies@hearst.com by Monday, February 9 with "advice" in the subject line. You will be contacted if we're planning to run your quote.

THE QUESTION FROM A REDBOOK READER:
A year ago I met a man who was recently divorced from his wife of nine years. Since we met, we've dated each other exclusively. The problem is that each time we make plans to spend quality time together his ex happens to call and he ends up taking care of his child instead. At first being a single mom myself I understood, but now it's getting out of hand. I try to suggest to him where the boundaries should be but his excuse is always It's my kid and I'm just trying to be a good dad. Now our quality time comes down to whenever he can fit me in and maybe if I'm lucky a session in the sack. When I try to walk away he begs me to stay and tells me that he loves me like no other. But lately I've felt that our relationship has been more like a booty call, and I'm too old for that. Can you help me to understand why I'm allowing myself to feel so cheap?
CG, 40

THE ANSWER FROM KAREN:
I don't think there's any deep psychological problem that causes you to subject yourself to this. The simple truth is that love makes us a little crazy.
It's great to be understanding, but remember that you can understand something without condoning it. Your ability to empathize with your guy's desire to be a good father gives him a ready-made excuse for breaking his dates with you, whether he's conscious of it or not. He knows that whenever he plays the daddy card, you'll understand, and so you do. But there's the rub. Because you don't walk away, your man has no motivation for standing up to his ex-wife, and possibly suffering a nasty confrontation.
There is no reason on earth why in any given week he can't make concrete plans with his ex-wife about when he's going to see his kid, then honor the plans he made with you. Unless said plans include the summiting of Everest, where there's a chance he'll be out of cell range for a week or more, the man should be able to shut his phone off and go to a movie.
If his ex-wife has some last-minute thing she has to do, she can call a friend, a family member, or a baby-sitter. The last time I checked, paying a responsible 14-year-old girl to watch your kid for three hours doesn't make you a bad parent.
I know the situation is more complicated than this. Being in a relationship where there are ex-spouses and kids in the picture is always hugely, messily, ridiculously complicated. Your guy may say that if he's not available to his ex-wife, she'll turn his child against him. He may say that if he's forced to say no to her, she won't let him see his child. There will be many reasons why he can't just make his plans and turn off his phone. Tell him you understand, but that you also think too highly of yourself to be treated this way (and by the way, you also have your own child or children to think of; you need to be a good mom, and that involves modeling self-respect). Unless he can figure out a way to fix this — and yes, if he wants a relationship with you, he will figure out a way — you're walking away and staying away. Your priority is to feel loved and cherished, and the amazing thing is that once you acknowledge and embrace that truth, he probably will too.