Don’t Walk Away! How to Ask a Girl for Her Phone Number

To land a date with the cute girl you’re chatting up, you’re going to need her number. These 10 steps help you know how to ask a girl for her phone number.

As a female, I’ve been in the situation where I’m waiting for the guy to ask me for my number. In fact, sometimes I just give it because I’m tired of waiting. Most of the time it’s because the guy is too busy patting off his sweaty forehead or fumbling his way through asking me the age old question, can I have your number? If you follow these steps on how to ask a girl for her phone number, soon you’ll be busy planning a date.

How to ask a girl for her phone number: 10 steps that work

You shouldn’t look at this as some treacherous and anxiety-ridden task. If you just follow these steps, not only will you not sweat as much, but you’ll also end up with her number on your phone.

#1 Should you get her number? Before you go and put yourself out on a limb, think about if you actually want her number or not. Not because you’re scared of rejection, but think about it—did you actually have a good time talking to her?

I see it all the time where guys get the number of a girl and then never text her because he wasn’t that interested in her. Then why even bother? Are you just practicing your pick-up skills? What’s the point? Listen, it should be simple: if you’re interested in her then get her number.

#2 What’s your goal? What do you want from this girl? Okay, that may have been a bad question, I know at the end of the day what you’re interested in, but let’s just pretend that’s not the only thing on your mind. Do you want to go on a date with her? Or are you just planning on pulling a one-nighter with her?

Because if that’s the case, then you should probably be leaving the club with her right now instead of trying to get her number. Know what you want before you start trying to form some sort of relationship with her.

#3 Pick the right time. This is what most guys worry about—when do you ask for her number? You probably think it’s a good idea to ask her for her number at the end of the conversation—no, not a good idea.

Rather, when you and she are at the peak of your conversation where the conversation is really flowing, that’s when you should ask her for her number. If you ask for her number right before leaving the club or party, it’ll look like you were just trying to score anything. After you get her number, carry on with the conversation. This shows you’re genuinely interested in her.

#4 Don’t ask her. Let’s make this very clear: do not ask her for her number. It kind of gives off a desperate vibe and though women like manners on a guy, we want a guy who knows what they want. Asking for our number makes it appear that you’re unsure.

So, instead, say to her, “I would really like to meet you again, give me your number and I’ll give you a call.” Be confident and completely normal when telling her. She’ll probably say yes.

#5 Be prepared. You cannot tell her to give you her number confidently and then spend the next five minutes fumbling in your pockets trying to find your phone. Have it ready to go. Okay, not to where the screen is opened to “new contact,” but have it easily accessible. You want it to flow smoothly from her saying yes to her giving you her number.

#6 Give her your phone. Just hand her your phone so she can enter in her number herself. Don’t have her yelling the number into your ear and then you don’t get it right and she has to do it again. She knows how to work a phone, let her do it herself. If you’re nervous about handing her your phone you obviously need to clean up some of the photos from your gallery.

#7 Casually bring up some possible dates. As she’s entering her number into your phone, casually bring up some ideas for your date. You can say, “We can meet up for a coffee,” or “If you like sushi, I know a great place in the city.” It shows her you’re interested and you know what you want.

Also, you can see from her reply what she likes and what she doesn’t like, that helps you figure out where to take her.

#8 Text her right away. After she gives you her number shoot her a quick text. I know there’s some secret rule about how long you have to wait until you text her, I heard it was three days. Listen, that’s stupid. You’re a grown man. You don’t have to sit and wait three days to text a girl you’re interested in. If you like her, you text her whenever you want.

I recommend texting her right away just so she knows the number is yours. Text her something flirtatious or keep it casual. The point is, she’ll know it’s you.

#9 Don’t lie your way to get her number. Many guys lie about their intentions when getting a girl’s number. Don’t lie, it’s pointless. You don’t need her number because you’re interested in the health food store she works at or you wanted to switch gyms and you’ve been eyeing the one she goes to.

Come on, we’re not stupid. So, cut the crap and just be straight up. She’ll respect you more if you’re honest than if you come up with a lame excuse to ask her out. To be honest, your odds of getting rejected are higher as well.

#10 Know when to back off. You have to know when she’s not interested in you or feels uncomfortable with giving you her number. In that case, don’t force her. If she’s not comfortable then ask if you can add her on Facebook. Some girls don’t feel comfortable giving their numbers to complete strangers. I know, you spoke to her for an hour, but that still makes you a stranger.

So, just suck it up and add her on Facebook. From there, continue speaking until she feels more comfortable to meet you for a date. What I’m trying to say is, don’t force something that’s not coming naturally to you.

If you follow these steps, you’ll be well on your way to getting her number. Just breathe, no one likes an excessively sweaty guy.