Sunday, 6 December 2009

HOME THOUGHTS FROM A FRAUD

The first inkling I had of what retirement would be like was when I found myself buying a pair of bright yellow 'Marigolds'. For the unititiated, these are rubber household gloves used when washing dishes or for other domestic chores. Naturally I only wear them when no-one can see me. Except of course for Dearly Beloved who no doubt derives some perverse pleasure in witnessing my indignity.

I jest.

I have no problem with helping out at home and anyway, I was forewarned. I attended not one but two pre-retirement courses (not that I was eager to stop work or anything you understand!) and the first thing I learned there proved to be very true. We were told that in cases where our wives were still working when we retired, we would be left lists. Each morning there would be a verbal or written list of tasks to be completed before our spouses arrived home - and so it came to pass.

I have become intimately acquainted with the dishwasher and with the hoover. You can stop thinking your smutty thought right now! I have my own apron. I also took a crash course in how to put up the ironing board which thankfully I am rarely called upon to use.

However, I have a confession to make. I'm a bit of a fraud. My apparent inability to fathom the workings of the washing machine are shall we say, a trifle embellished. I trust you dear reader to keep this secret to yourself and on no account let it reach the ears of my dear wife.

4 comments:

Tony my wife is a big believer in "pinesol"for cleaning which has a very distinct fresh smell. I have been known to put a bowl of pinesol beside the fresh air intake to the furnace then the whole house smells like pinesol and she thinks I have been cleaning

Tony, when Devoted Spouse retired, I kept working and I did leave him lists of things to do, but he was having so much fun that I simply quit my job - we got a housecleaner, and now neither one of us wears the yellow gloves! Although while I was injured he DID do the laundry, supervised of course! And, Joe, I'M TELLING... just kidding! Hugs!

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About Me

Batty Brit who won life's lottery when I retired. Now I can do what I want when I want with chocolate, cream and a cherry on the top.
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