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May 11, 2017

For My Mom

Ghing is the strongest woman I know. Her positivity empowers her to do anything even the unthinkable. Her influence is just simply remarkable. Friends just indulge in her presence for she is a source of inspiration and hope. She lived a wonderful life, fought a lot of battles. Her life is a true testament of endurance and compassion. In her absence, life was never the same.

Here's a little story about me and my mom and the lessons I have learned through her life and beyond it. We had a lot of disagreements. There were even times that I feel like she hated me. I always wanted to be the apple of her eye, because having her favor will be my greatest advantage. But when she left, I realise how much love she has for me, how she was always there for me. That the day she was born was the biggest blessing that the Lord has ever given me, long before I was even thought of. How she has always believed in all my dreams and ambitions, no matter how I change them on instants. To believe in myself, no matter what I want to do or who I want to be, is of utmost importance to her.

She prepared me well before she passed. In her vulnerable state I was trembling deep inside but I refuse to give in to
the thought of losing her. For I know she wanted our family to be strong as her, that even
to her last good-bye, she wants us to celebrate her beautiful life. I even went to work that very day after all that happened because I know that's what she wants. She polished everything before it was her time to go back to her real home in heaven, and for that, she showed how her love strands even beyond her living days.

The love she emits to her family extends to all of her friends. I think that is something I got from her - a heart exuding with love and care and concern despite the disparities. She is someone who gives her all and invests her cares, which also spells out her sorrow whenever she feels that a friend is drifting away from her presence. I got that from her, and I am thankful for it.

It's been six years since she finished fighting her battles, but honestly, I can still feel that she is with me. Cliche as it sounds but 'they never go away for they live in our hearts forever' is true. Saying goodbye doesn't lead to forgetting them - it's on us to let them live within ourselves and that's what makes a person eternal. That's what makes a person live beyond a life they have lived, with that, my mom lives on. On every adventure I embark on, every laughing moment, and even at times when I just cry and release my sadness - She is there.

To my Mom, thank you for the things you have taught me. They may not be the typical moments between a mother and a son but I apologize that it took me to loose you before I realize all of them. For teaching me how to love and how to value friends, which led to be one of my prized virtues in life, I thank you. To give up on a person no matter what, but also letting go, though may be hard, of people who gives up on you. Most of all, thank you for loving me in your own special way. Your imperfections make you the perfect mother for the son that I was and the person that I am today. We shared a special bond that only us can understand and learn from. I promise to live a life that will make you proud - it won't be that hard because all you want for me is to live a happy life, be a blessing to others, and to be a good person inside and out.