Be An “Encourager,” Not A “Hater”

3 min read

“Don’t Hate – Congratulate.”

Most of us have heard the above statement. We may have said it to others, or we have heard someone else use it, as a way to let a person know, not to “hate,” but encourage others. Well, this is the line I recently used with my students, after noticing their “hater” behavior.

Not too long ago, my students stood in front of their fellow classmates, requesting their support for student council. As they spoke, sharing why they were the best person for President, Vice-President, Secretary, or Treasurer, I noticed their audience of peers, laughing, snickering, giving disdainful looks, and making hurtful comments. When it was over, a number of the candidates left the room in tears. They felt discouraged, annoyed, and dejected.

Of course, the student’s behavior warranted a lecture by me. I explained that they were being “haters” and their peers needed to be encouraged and congratulated for their bravery. I also shared that it is not easy to stand in front of others, and speak about one’s strengths and ask for a vote.

Most of the students seemed to understand my disappointment in their attitude, as they agreed that their behavior was not kind. Yet, after that talk I continued to think about this situation and how this kind of “hater” attitude occurs, beyond my classroom and in the world.

We live in a society where people spend so much time “hating” on others. I see it too often on television and on social media, where people spend their time spewing negative insults. They speak with judgmental attitudes, giving their opinions, as if they have the right answers on how someone should live their life. These same people rarely see strength, bravery, and success in others. And most of them are proud of their harsh criticisms, and don’t see any fault with their behavior. Yet, there is something horribly wrong with them.

The problem with a “hater,” is their inability to be happy with the success of others. This causes them to spew malicious insults and expose the person’s faults. Sadly, this behavior from the “hater” is nothing less, than immature and toxic. It will eventually effect others who are also too immature to notice and stop, the hater behavior. Sadly, this world has created a cycle of people that hate.

This world needs to do better and end the cycle of hating. They must learn to look for the best in people, seeing the heart, strength, bravery, and courage of others to do something they would not attempt to do.

So make the decision to be happy for others, being an encourager…… and not a hater.

Thanks for trying to get them when they’re young and not set in bad ways. I have always thought the opposite of hate is not love, but creating (something of your own). It is easy to criticize kids running for office; harder to ask “what am I bravely doing/creating?”