Dear Fr. Joe: Why is pride a sin – what about pride in your work or family? Is there a good kind of pride? If so, what kind of pride is sinful?
Great question! I am glad someone finally asked me about pride because, frankly, I am the master of humility. I am the most humble man I know; a virtual standard for humility. So much so that I am currently working on a book called Humility and How It Made Me Great. I am sure it will be a best-seller. Then, I will write a sequel called The Three Most Humble People In the World and How I Trained the Other Two. I could keep going you know ...
Back to the question, the glossary of the Catechism of the Catholic Church describes pride as “One of the seven capital sins. Pride is undue self-esteem or self-love, which seeks attention and honor and sets oneself in competition with God.” Let’s break that down ...
In order to grow in holiness, we need to grow in self-knowledge. The Holy Father wrote about this in his book, The Acting Human, and he has spoken about it in numerous addresses. Self-knowledge is when we have a realistic view of ourselves and an idea of what our weaknesses and strengths are. We need both of these things to have a healthy concept of ourselves. Now, the opposite of that healthy self-knowledge is found in pride.
So, to figure out what is good and what is sinful, let’s look at some specific examples and see what we learn.
Okay, first, let’s say that we are good at something. If we are good at something, and we are aware that we are good at it, it is not prideful to acknowledge that fact. That is speaking the truth. St. Francis of Assisi is quoted as saying, “True humility begins with our ability to recognize our weaknesses as well as our strengths.”
On the other hand, if we know we are good at something and then say we aren’t good at it, that is lying. This is called false humility. This is when we refuse compliments and deny our goodness at certain things. We may even claim that God cannot love us and that “sets oneself in competition with God.”
If it is hard for you to take compliments, then try this: the next time people compliment you, let’s consider it a prayer. That person making the compliment is thanking God through you for the gift you manifest.
That does bring up an important point. I think one of the reasons that we all have trouble accepting compliments is that we don’t have any practice. Think about how hard it is for us to compliment and receive compliments.
I firmly believe that one of the greatest weaknesses among the Catholic family is that we are so very specific with our criticisms and so very general with our praise. I challenge myself and everyone reading this column today to take this Easter season and dedicate ourselves to studying people, looking at their lives and seeing where they are strong. We do the opposite naturally and easily – ever notice that? When we then see someone’s gifts, we must take that truth to them and honor them for it. Think of how far a very generous compliment will take you and then share that joy with someone else.
Believe it or not, this will help us all be more humble.
With all this in mind, I hope we see that it is a good thing to take pride in our work if we are good workers. It is a good thing to take pride in our family if we love and honor them and are encouraging them to be faithful to the mission of Jesus and the church.
I think that in the end, the key to a healthy balance between too much pride and false humility is to recognize where our gifts came from and be grateful to God for giving us them. Another key is to make sure and observe our brothers’ and sisters’ strengths and share them in a specific way. The final point is to then take the strengths we see in ourselves or that others have seen in us and dedicate them to working for Jesus and his bride, the church.

"The precepts of the Lord are honest, joy for the heart; the commandment of the Lord is pure, light for the eyes.
The fear of the Lord is pure, lasting for ever; the judgements of the Lord are true, upright, every one,
more desirable than gold, even than the finest gold; his words are sweeter than honey, that drips from the comb.
Thus your servant is formed by them; observing them brings great reward.
But who can detect his own failings? Wash away my hidden faults.
And from pride preserve your servant, never let it be my master.
So shall I be above reproach, free from grave sin.
May the words of my mouth always find favor, and the whispering of my heart, in your presence, the Lord, my rock, my redeemer.

Psalm 19 verses 8-14

__________________JESUS who died once for all persons
who gives Yourself wholly in Communion to billions throughout time
please pray in me for every person
as if each person is the only loved one.JESUS please welcome each person with love, healing, and great joy!
Thank You JESUS

Mother Mary at the wedding feast of Cana (John 2:1-12)
though JESUS protested it was not yet time for miracles
you successfully interceded with Him for a family's temporal need
please now intercede with your divine Son
for each person's temporal and spiritual needs.
Thank you MotherJESUS please grant our prayer for this person

Wonderful posts! I was accused recently of lacking humility when someone saw me playing a Scrabble game on my phone and he asked me if I was good at it. I replied that I was very good at it. When he said "hmmm... some humility", I just said it's the truth. As the post says, humility is knowing our strengths AND our weaknesses. Why should I lie and say I'm not good at something I'm very good at? My life has become about being honest.

Now if we went fishing and he asked me if I was good at it, I'd have to say HECK NO.

I have great trouble with pride and humility. I feel ashamed to smile when given a compliment, I feel it is prideful. I'm certain that this is excessive. How can you tell if it's false humility? I feel that many of the compliments I am given are for things that don't warrant praise, and to accept that praise would be wrong.

I have great trouble with pride and humility. I feel ashamed to smile when given a compliment, I feel it is prideful. I'm certain that this is excessive. How can you tell if it's false humility? I feel that many of the compliments I am given are for things that don't warrant praise, and to accept that praise would be wrong.

I don't think it's wrong to accept praise, encouragement, or validations (blessings). We must learn to accept "good" things from the Lord...for He is Good. I assure you that when God looks at you He is not zooming in on your faults. "You are all fair my love, there is no flaw in you," song of Solomon.

I think what offends God more than our flaws is that we let our flaws be a barrier to being in relationship. We have so much pride and shame that we hide our faces from Him. If only we could turn to look at Him and see the look of tenderness in His eyes, we would know how much He loves us and even thinks we are beautiful. "You have ravished my heart, my sister, my bride; you have stolen my heart with one glance of your eyes" Song of Solomon 4:9

When Jesus loves someone He does not heap insults upon them, rather blessings, heart-felt compliments and validations. It wounds His heart when we do not receive all that He wants to shower on us. Jesus wants to lift us up. And in my experience He lets us know if we are doing something that offends Him, we need not dig for things.

Anyhow, learning to accept being loved more than you know you deserve is the first step to having a deeper more intimate relationship with Jesus.