Luke wins 'Bromance' and Other Dating Show Updates

Though he failed to stand up for his man while his Boston pals razzed Jenner for his part in "Laguna Beach," Luke edged a stunned Femi, the Jacksonville guy whose main fault was sticking with his Florida girlfriend, though Jenner advised against it (violating the unstated commandment: Thou shall have no other girls before me).

The third finalist and the first to get he boot in the episode was Chris F., and it was probably a good thing he got out of there before more people talked about his porn addictions.The show, oddly patterned after a dating reality show, ended like "Paris Hilton's My New BFF" did, with the two finalists going to two different locations, one a celebratory party, the other an empty parking garage with a TV message."I picked Luke because he's a great guy," said Jenner, who was aided in his decision by his mother Linda Thompson (Elvis last girlfriend and David Foster's ex; they both appeared on Fox's awful "The Princes of Malibu" a couple years back).

Luke wins the keys to an L.A. bachelor pad and got a new vehicle. "I didn't have a ca back home," an ecstatic Luke said in his Boston accent. "I sold my ca."

Of the winner, Jenner said, "He can roll with anything. He'll always have my back and he'll always be there for me when I need him. At the end of the day that's what I'm looking for in a friend. Congratulations Luke, you are my bromance."Then they kissed.No, not really. But the language of the show sure was like that in the dating shows. Thompson asked the finalists hooked up to a lie detector whether they thought Brody was attractive. And Jenner said Chris, for example, was "great guy, he's funny, but we just didn't have that connection."

Which was exactly the same thing Jason Mesnick said of Stephanie, when he eliminated that tall Southern widow and mother from "The Bachelor" at about the same time on ABC.

"You are the most amazing person I've ever met," Jason told her, tearfully. But alas, they didn't have that spark.

But there were other unspoken problems and not just the operatic singing voice she unleashed from time to time. She was also the only single mother left, and because he didn't introduce his own son to the finalists when they all came to visit him in Seattle (though Melissa got to take a peek at a sleeping Ty), he was pretty sure he didn't want to meet her daughter if he wasn't going to ultimately pick her has bride (the constant being: don't raise a kid's hope if all you're going to be is a ultimately betrayed finalist on a reality show). And there was that other "Bachelor" quirk - Stephanie at 34 was older than the other three left, so it will be Melissa, 25; Jillian, 29; Naomi, 24; and Molly, also 24; hosting their own hometown visits next week.

It all seems very classy, this process, but the thinning of the harem process is no different on any other show, from "Flavor of Love" and "Rock of Love" to "Bromance" and the latest one that also began Monday, "For the Love of Ray J."

Amid some circles, Ray J is known as a brother of the singer Brandy who wants to be a singer himself. But while the 14 women gathered to date him probably couldn't name a single Ray J song, but most had seen the sex tape he was in with Kim Kardashian (they waved baguettes to show their approval).

Everything about the show is by the book, from the strippers to the mansion to the star's blend of lechery and ambivalence. Ray J even picked nicknames for them, but none as colorful or badly spelled as the ones Flavor Flav did.

"Of course I gave the girls nicknames," he said. "That's what they do on this show."

A woman with a tiger tattoo on her face was named Danger, a Russian woman was caviar, and a Puerto Rican was called Atom Bomb, though she later said, "I don't even know what an atomic bomb is."

The heavy drinker he named Chardonnay thought she had it in the bag. "I think I'm the perfect girl for Ray, because I can put my legs behind my head."

But she almost went home. The first two who did were Hot Cocoa, deemed too cold; and Naturalle, exposed as an aspiring actress (which for these shows is like having some sort of disease). She probably couldn't put her legs behind her head anyway.

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Roger Catlin is TV critic for the Hartford Courant and writes a daily column about what's on television called TV Eye. He is also on the board of the Television Critics Association. Before all of this, he was rock critic ... read more