Three yards and a cloud of dust? It’s time for KU football to disappear into the clouds.

In 2009, after 74 years of fielding a football team, Northeastern University in Boston dropped football, saying it was too expensive and not a top priority.

The school’s president issued a statement, saying:

“Ultimately it was determined that elevating and sustaining a competitive Division I football program would require additional multimillion dollar investments on an ongoing basis. A broad consensus developed behind discontinuing football and focusing future resources on programs — both academic and non-academic — where the university can achieve and sustain leadership.”

According to Wikipedia, Northeastern is one of 62 Division I schools that have dropped football. The ranks include Creighton University, in Omaha, in 1942, and Wichita State in 1986.

Now I think it’s time for another Midwestern school to make the big jump: The University of Kansas.

And what could be a better time than this week?

Why this week?

Well, I’ll tell ya…The KU team is so bad (and has been for so long) that with its loss at Texas Christian University Saturday night, the team tied the all-time record for most consecutive road defeats by a major football program.

The 43-0 shellacking was the team’s 44th consecutive road loss, tying a mark set by Western (Colo.) State from 1926 to 1936.

Oh, and the team set another record Saturday night: It gained a total of 21 yards on 49 plays, the fewest net yards recorded since such statistics began being kept 17 years ago.

Like KU quarterback Peyton Bender on Saturday, KU football is flat on its back.

…Now, when an aspiring politician is watching the election results come in and sees he’s going to lose by, say, 10,000 votes in a 15,000-vote election, the honorable thing to do — and what most candidates do — is concede. Make a nice speech, thank your supporters and return to your job and figure out another avenue for civic involvement.

For KU football, though, humiliating losses have become the norm. Their teams have been getting beaten like a snare drum for years. To me, it’s time to GIVE IT UP!

The only period during which KU was any good in the last four decades or so was a few years in the mid- to late 2000s, when Mark Mangino was coach. But, in retrospect, that turned out to be a dark period, too, because it came to light that Mangino’s greatest talent was humiliating and abusing his players.

His idea of motivating players was sticking a finger in front of their noses and saying things like:

:: “Are you going to be a lawyer or do you want to become an alcoholic like your Dad?'”

:: “You’ll be drinking out of a brown paper bag the rest of (your) life.”

:: “If you don’t shut up, I’m going to send you back to St. Louis so you can get shot with your homies.”

Thankfully, Mangino was fired after the 2009 season, but he still walked away with a $3 million payout, representing part of what he would have been paid had he stayed around for the last four years of his $2.3 million annual contract.

With this kind of track record on and off the gridiron, you’d think officials at KU might be considering punting…for the final time.

Wouldn’t it be great to see the university’s new chancellor, Douglas Girod, come out and say something like this…

“After much deliberation, we’ve decided football is no longer a top priority at the University of Kansas. It has become an ever-increasing drain on school finances and detracts our foremost goal — to produce well-educated students who are prepared to compete in today’s fast-paced, demanding world and who will make a positive impact on society. We are also concerned about the long-term, physical and mental well being of our student athletes, and football, it is becoming ever clearer, is a long-term health threat.”

Ah, but sadly we’re not going to hear an eloquent statement like that. (Thank you very much, though, for the standing ovation!) Instead — almost unbelievably — KU recently announced the start of a five-year drive to privately raise $350 million for improvements, mostly to Memorial Stadium.

Three hundred and fifty million! In the pursuit of continued futility!

Wisely, The Star’s editorial board came out strongly against the fund drive, saying the reasoning behind the drive did not include “a clear statement of why these projects help advance KU’s mission, which is to educate students.”

The editorial went on to say: “The effort is even more concerning when you realize it focuses on football. Even the game’s most ardent fans must wince occasionally these days, as uncompensated ‘student athletes’ crack heads on the gridiron.”

…As I wrote last week, with the decline of football — which I think is inevitable — I’m worried about what happens with the great tradition of marching bands.

So, I have a suggestion for an alternate course at KU. Instead of trying to raise $350 million for football-related improvements, set a fund-raising goal of $100 million to make KU the marching band capital of at least the Midwest.

Yes, proceed with improvements at Memorial Stadium, but do so with a view toward accommodating the best college marching bands at an annual exhibition/competition that would draw bands and their followers from throughout the Midwest.

It could be big, I tell ya…And about the worst injuries we would see among competing band members would probably be some cases of dehydration and maybe some muscle strains.

Come on, KU, wise up! Climb out of the ever-expanding football sinkhole.

I first saw that story on The Times’ website. The progressive image they used online was of a team huddling and then the huddle melting away. What can you say? Even the NYT can’t resist the gimmickry that technology offers.