Home on the Herradura

El Jefe relaxes after crushing an insurrection at the Central Fish Market."You live as a dogfish, you die like a fish burrito!"

Saludos! And welcome to Jef Jaisun's barely-updated home page. (Come on, now...Who has time for this stuff anymore, besides bloggers and corporate billboarders?) As my pal Lalo Topolobampo likes to put it, "Where does this guy get the time to be the Thorn In The Side Of Everybody, a rock singer trapped in a folksinger's body, an international traveler (and to hear him, "recording artist"), a world class photographer AND a journeyman electrical administrator? That, and be on the web 8/26/367?"

Dude! Good qweschuns! But let's move right along with to more accolades, shall we?

"You are the Ernest Hemingway of Blues and Baseball. I swear!"

That's DeeBorAah's take on it, and far be it from me to argue with a babe-o-licious redhead. (I can't do anything about her swearing, but maybe the FCC will fine her $500,000.) Besides, she may be on to something. Big Guy Art, aka "The Franchise," towering sports writer for a Great Metropolitan Jointly Operated Newspaper, recently opined, "Write a letter. Hell, you get published more than Hemingway."

Who has time for that stuff anymore, besides cranky right wingers?

As you may have already deduced, there's no shortage of twisted humor around here. Sorry about that. No, wait -- I'm not at all sorry about that! You can run but you can't hide. Can you laugh? This site will undoubtedly confirm your worst fears that something is terribly wrong with your Nanny Minder filter. Too late. Not even a V-chip can save you now, but just for the record I'M NOT TRACKING YOU! (Not even you, Mr. Homeland Security computer spy geek.) Here we go...

Please select from the following essential food groups:

Jef Jaisun Photography -- FLASH! Jef's photo web site and archives have moved to
www.jaisunphoto.com There you will find many of Jef's famous images, including the 2001 Hanson Gallery of New Orleans exhibit and the ongoing Highway 99 Blues Club exhibit in Seattle. Plus, see a selection of 28 years worth of photo images finally unleashed. A vault full of pictures you could have taken, if only that security goon hadn't noticed the telephoto bulge under your t-shirt. (That's okay -- let's see him try to take your camera phone away.) Real photos from real film -- none o' that digital trickery...yet. (Btw...thank you, Annie Leibovitz, for finally discovering the Delta. I'm sure you made all those old blues guys real happy. What have done for them lately?)

My Musical Career -- The present day composter refuses to biodegrade. My "legendary" underground hit,Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent, was recorded more than 35 years ago. In 1971, Record World called it "the basis of an Alice's Restaurant-type cult." I'm still waiting for the cult groupies to show up. Here's the sordid FAQ and a link to the lyrics...all six verses! (And you thought there were only three.) As for the other 1000+ tunes I've written, the three albums, the numerous European tours and the fact I've been playing the Blues since 1965, well, that'll be here eventually. (But thank you, Marty Scorcese, for finally discovering the Delta. I'm sure you made all those old blues guys real happy for about five minutes.)

Jef the Journalist -- Berkeley Barb, Journal-American, Blue Suede News, Blues To-Do, and lots more. I been everywhere, man. See the guy who's responsible for a lot of it, Barb founder Max Scherr, in this Robert Altman pic.

*Luther Allison* -- One of the world's most popular blues performers and treasured human beings passed away eight years ago. He was diagnosed with cancer on July 10, 1997 and barely had time to say good-bye. For fans of Luther, as well as blues aficionados in general, this remains a real loss. This page contains press releases, photos and interviews, with links to other Luther pages and related web sites, including his posthumous sweep of the 1998 W.C. Handy Awards.

"Seattle -- The Town the Millennium Forgot" -- Remember waaaaaay back when Seattle was "America's Most Livable City?" It dropped completely out of the Top 200 years ago. It's not like I haven't been telling people it sucks here for YEARS! Now maybe they'll believe me. After WTO and the New Year's Civic Millennium Party cancellations, anybody believing the hype about Seattle should have been roundly thrashed in the town square. Fortunately, we have police who'll do it for free, and another pro-developer mayor who's too busy to care. Btw, I didn't see Tom Hanks or Meg Ryan in the WTO crowds. Guess tear gas isn't that romantic. Strap on your boots, wear protective head gear and respect my authoritah! We're going in!

BONUS! Some crazed Seattle psychobilly finally took the long overdue leap. Seattlesucks.com!

Seattle Persecutor Craps Out! -- Art outlives paranoia, but you'd never know it in what used to be "America's Most Livable City." The 1996 case of Jason Sprinkle, so outrageous I busted it out of my Seattle Sucks page and gave it a link of its own. In an unfortunate postscript -- with special thanks to King County Prosecutors Norm Maleng and Daniel Soukup for their early, reactionary harassment -- Sprinkle died on May 16, 2005 at the age of 35. The art he created will outlive him, and his toothless, brain-dead persecutors. Please go read this page, and maybe you'll get an idea how we got to be a nation of pathetic, ignorant sheep who tolerate the most insanely criminal poltical system since the Ayatollah Khomeini. Then go read Sprinkle's obit. To quote an old friend of mine, "May the baby Jesus shut your mouth and open your mind." Jason Sprinkle, R.I.P.

Lick Bush! -- Things go better with coke! Just ask Gee-Dubya. Nothing's changed, except that you Lucys in the red states got some serious 'splainin' to do.

Bligh Reef Productions -- Happy 16th Anniversary of the Exxon Valdez oil spill! And the bastards still haven't paid a penny of the $5 billion judgement against them. But why get mad when you can get even? See the infamous "FUXXUP" t-shirt, officially banned by the Alaska State Fair. You can even order one for your very own! Life doesn't get any better.

Still Waiting for the Electrician -- or, Do It Til It Herz, a musician's take on the National Electrical Code. Once again, Jef is out standing in his electrical field. Don't touch the red wire!

Baseball!!! -- Okay, Mariners fans (whoever's left after last season's debacle). No Griffey, no Tino, no Pay-Rod, no Big Unit, and now no Edgar. Call me when you get tired of being the Yankees' farm team. The old mega-stars are all gone. Dan Wilson is the last remnant of the 1995 miracle team, and he's out for the season. Time to seal the coffin on that glorious but ancient event, and for Rick Rizzs to stop dredging it up like it happened yesterday. But will the M's let it go? Not freakin' chance! In fact, they're taking the opportunity to shove the ten year anniversary down our throats with more promotions, radio clips and...well, you know. Bullshit. The fact is the team stinks for the second year in a row. The good news is Ichiro can still kick the sushi out of the rest of the AL. The better news is A-Rod is in therapy! Here's a guy who couldn't tell the truth if his life depended on it. All he ever wanted was a ton of money and Derek Jeter's rings and girlfriends. So, did you shed a tear for him when you saw him sitting forlornly in the dugout while the Red Sox danced on the mound at Yankee Stadium last October? BUAHAHAHA!!! Life's a bitch, A-Rod, and so are you. Meanwhile, Bob Melvin is winning with his new team, and the best Hargrove can do is try to help the M's lose with respectability. Unfortunately, none of that changes the stanky underwear in the front office.

Approved Porn Site for 14-Year-Olds! -- Finally! A place your kids can visit without fear of detection, corruption or aggravating web-blocking. See the alluring "Loretta-Boy" after "corrective" surgery! See Stella pose for her fella! Catch the nubile Bon-Bon in splendiferous repose! This is a Britney Spears-Free Zone, so meddling parents, leering televangelists and Bob Dole KEEP OUT!