The wedding toast has evolved from a simple â€śto your health and happinessâ€ť to a personalized, fine tuned presentation, and often using props for visual aids.Â Statistics show that, next to dying, public speaking is some Americansâ€™ greatest fear.

Who toasts, what order, and how many?Â There is a simple equation to make this be a memorable event at your wedding rather than a disaster and embarrassment.Â AVOID an â€śopen microphoneâ€ť at your wedding for anyone to say a toast.Â If you are interested in having an “open microphone,” it is best to offer this option for your closest family and friends at the rehearsal dinner.

One key thing to remember, the bride and/or groom have entrusted YOU to be in the position with the microphone to say something remarkable about them, and their relationship.Â Treat others the way you would like to be treated, and your toast will be a raving success!

The bride and groom should have a list of who will be toasting, and in which order, which they have given to their bandleader and/or DJ for introductions.Â If they have not, make sure you discuss this with them so you know their preference.

Tips for Preparing Your Toast.

Stand when offering a toast.

Speak from your heart, and research to find out clever and interesting facts about the bride and groom which would be interesting and clever to share about their relationship in a positive light.

Be upbeat when offering toasts.

If someone has died in the family recently, this is not the time or place to offer your sympathy.

If you do include humor, do it tastefully, and end on a serious note.

Quotes from readings and poetry may enrich your toast, as well as letting the bride and groom know you cared enough to give it some thought ahead of time.

The best man usually offers the first toast, followed by the maid/matron of honor.

Wedding toasts are traditionally made to the bride and groom individually, and then to the couple.

A wedding toast should be trimmed down to 3 minutes maximum.Â You WILL lose your audienceâ€™s interest if it is longer.Â Edit your word choice, the more impact is from the least amount of words.

If this is the second marriage for the couple, NEVER mention this during the toast.

Practice your toast in front of a family member, or in front of a close personal friend.

Delivering Your Toast.

Speak into the microphone, and arrive early for a sound check to feel comfortable in the room so you know how close to hold the microphone to your mouth.Â You donâ€™t want feedback screeching in the room, and you donâ€™t want the level of the volume of the microphone so low no one can hear what you say.

Avoid saying â€śumâ€ť, â€śyou know,â€ť â€śI mean,â€ť and other phrases which mean you are not well prepared.

Keep the tone of your voice interesting, not monotone, not too high pitch, and donâ€™t speak to fast, or too slow.

Make eye contact with the bride and groom, and everyone in the room.Â Do not have your back to anyone.

Do not chew gum.

Make sure everyone has something to drink as their toast.

Remember to bring your glass with you when you offer your toast.

If they havenâ€™t already spoken to you, make sure you speak to the wedding planner, head captain, photographer, videographer, DJ, and band know where your toast is in the timeline for the day.

Wish them well.Â A toast to the bride and groom should end with hopefull wishes for a happy future.

Offer personal advice, or pull inspiration from historical quotes, readyings, literature, or even song lyrics.