It pays to have a sense of humor. After all, what’s a good, lucrative eugenics program without one? But the key is to implement your plan in plain sight, under the cover of national security and benevolence to humanity.

The CIA wanted to find substances which would “promote illogical thinking and impulsiveness.” Serious consideration should be given to the idea that psychiatric medications, food additives, herbicides, and industrial chemicals (like fluorides) would eventually satisfy that requirement.