An open letter to my Nigerian Romance Scammer

First of, I admit, I miss the constant messages to ensure me how much you love me, how much you miss me, how you are constantly thinking about me. I got addicted t the intense attention you gave me, I’m pretty sure now, that’s part of the plan. The constant attention, the over exaggerated love profession. Love bombs from the time I woke up to the time I fell asleep. And even more love bombs in the middle of the night – because you couldn’t sleep because you were thinking of me.

You seemed to care so much – making sure I had eaten – and I thought – strange food obsession on your part. At times I thought, well maybe he’s just really lonely. Or maybe he’s drunk? Or maybe both.

I didn’t realize, you professed you wanted to marry me on day one – probably because it was message 111 – and you asked a lot of questions before that – but just only vague answers to my return questions.

I give you this – you are good at what you do! I’m sure I’m not the first one – nor the last one for that matter of fact.

However, I’m really sorry for the man whose picture you used, I’m sure he’s been a victim as well, maybe you and your buddies trade pics for that purpose. Who knows, maybe you or someone else is baiting someone with the few pictures I send you in return right now.

But when you started feeding me the fake website, and the fake documents – I started to wonder. I DID tell you I studied Computer Design – but I’m pretty sure you didn’t know what that meant. Probably thought it meant Designing on a Computer – hahaha. But yes, I saw the fakeness of the documents you send me – honestly, I could do a better job having done photoshop retouching for years.

But thank you for finally sending me an actual email from ‘you’ – that was the final evidence I needed to figure out that you were a Nigerian spammer. You do know that emails can be backtracked, right? Probably why you didn’t send me any until then. And yes, I baited you and watched you scramble a bit to finally send me your proof – really that was also badly done, even though you are careful to screenshot things at an angle, so the important info is unreadable or cuts off. Still, I can tell a screenshot of a computer monitor from a screenshot of a real document, honestly!

However, now, I’m sad. I enjoyed the endorphin high when I thought I had actually found a wonderful man. And I’m left sad and looking at my phone, where no ‘I love you’ messages are pinging all day long.

You put a lot of effort into this – there were 290 messages the first day. Wow, thank you for that effort! You picked some good scripts too: ‘You are the fire in my soul, all the wonderful things you do to me without even knowing makes me eager to live another day. You got me for life because its either you or nobody.’ and ‘I will careless what people think of my love for you, I’ll love you as long as the both of us share the air on earth. Good morning love’

But you slacked off the next day – only 106 messages that day – you probably needed to attend to someone else as well. And it went down from there – but still, keeping it up to 50-100 messages per day and that for a whole month – Wow, as I said, a lot of work.

I know that I was not the only one for sure, because I was contacted by one of the others – yes, I posted your name and details on spammer beware websites, long before I finally cut off all contact with you. I loved how you kicked it up when I whined about how I missed your special messages – you probably ran out of canned love-bombs then, but you found some more to feed to me – great job! ‘I’ll always love to love you. No doubt, you’re a blessing to my life and the air in my world. I can’t but wonder what I did to deserve someone special like you. Baby, true love is hard to find. Makes one feel good and opens the eyes. I only noticed all these since you came my way. I won’t let you go because you fill up the emptiness of my heart, I love you so much. Good night ❤️❤️’

Funny how you scrambled when I told you about my cousin in the same ‘field of work’ as you claimed – that really set you into high gear. And the ‘my friend ran a background check on you’ – wow, I’m still really astonished by your persistence then, to try to prove to me you were really that made up person you presented yourself at. Even sending me a fake passport image – again, that picture was badly done, really. And keeping up that rouse of the package you send me that was stopped by customs at the airport – really innovative approach. I did not see that scam on the scammer sites, which is why I started posting it everywhere. That fake website of yours, even screenshots and pictures of your fraud persona. I’m assuming you will move on to another name and town you are supposedly from – you will probably be sad to leave that one behind because you did go through quite some effort to make it legit – even the LinkedIn profile to back the fake person up. Nice touch by the way – and I also realize why you didn’t mention that before because getting your supposed degree at a German university would have looked very suspicious to me from the beginning. No wonder you were very vague with answers – hahaha.

So all in all, I’ve learned a lot from you. But I decided not to shut myself in and suffer in silence. Rather, I will shout it off the rooftop. And if only one person will see you for who you are rather then believing what you tell her, I consider that a win! (and in that respect, I already won!)

So, I’m getting back on the horse after falling off so to speak, and I will continue to try my luck at online dating – but definitely learned to double check and trust my intuition from now on.

Where there is no info on the name I background check – that’s NOT a good sign – it’s a very bad sign, as that person does not exist. Double check supposed phone numbers – no info – bad sign! Because if you really are who you say you are, you don’t have to hide!

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Susanne Rector

Originally from Germany, Susanne has settled into the California lifestyle, living with 2 daughters in a suburb of Los Angeles. She spends her time marketing and designing for small companies and empowering solo-preneurs on their journey.

1 Comment

Anonymous

Hi Suzanne.
This scammer got me also , for around 98% of my net worth. He phoned me and emailed me incessantly all day every day for around three months. He sent me the same picture that you have posted above but with my name not his. He proposed to me also and called me his ” wife ” . He spoke to my children several times professing his ” honorable intentions ” He also sent me a personal email from the real ” him ” telling me how much he missed ” making love to me ” ( yes we did that too )
My family has a difficult situation, He knew that. This criminal animal cared about one thing, trying to get your money ( and mine) I too am shouting out but in a different way . He has contacted me several times telling me he will return my money , that he missed and loves me but …….only if I remove the adverse posting.

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