ALOK PRASANNA writes from Bangalore: The relentless march of humanity has resulted in the extinction of several species of flora and fauna from this world, and now threatens to swallow up two more: the Marathi Manoos and the Mannina Maga, commonly known as M&Ms.

The rising tides of globalisation, immigration, and freedom of expression threaten to drown these two species of humanity like the tsunami in Dasavatharam.

The only way to save them is by identifying and protecting them, while destroying all their predators down to the last individual.

Due to the continuous assault by the predators, it has become hard to identify the true manoos and the true maga and therefore, great efforts have been made to examine and spot the characteristics of the true manoos and the true maga.

It is a common mistake to believe that the two species refer to those humans who generally speak Marathi and Kannada, and are from the areas now known as Karnataka and Maharashtra. Furthermore, all speakers of Marathi and Kannada are not members of these elusive groups, but must show certain distinctive traits that are the hallmark of the true manoos and the true maga.

Thanks to the untiring efforts of the Maharashtra Navnirman Samithi, Janata Dal (Secular), and the Karnataka Rakshana Vedike, we have now been able to precisely define these traits. It is with great pleasure that we bring to the public’s notice, this vital information in order that we may quickly identify and save these endangered species:

# M&Ms are perennially unemployed and generally unemployable in the absence of a strict reservation scheme keeping aside a certain number of jobs in a lucrative sector for them.

# M&Ms are highly sensitive to insults and have a very sensitive insult perception mechanism built into their bodies. Though the M&Ms are not capable of actually expressing outrage, nonetheless, the certain groups have been able to accurately tap into the insult perception mechanism of the M&Ms and respond accordingly.

# The M&Ms, unlike the majority of the human race, are generally found sans a funny bone. As a result, they are unable to distinguish between statements made humourously and seriously, preferring to take all statements out of context and understanding.

# The M&Ms have a distinct preference for black tar and black paint. This is generally used to mark out territory and express oneself through the unique process of “defacement”.

# Both the manoos and the maga are endangered due to the migration of large herds of “UP-Bihar North Indians speaking Hindi“. It is presently unclear how exactly these ravenous herds are causing the extinction of the M&Ms. Some say it is their ability to find employment at low rates, while others contend that it is their tendency to speak Hindi that is endangering the manoos and the maga. Further research, involving threats, assault and intimidation, currently being carried out by the MNS and the KRV, promises to confirm once and for all. Nevertheless, you can be sure that wherever these large herds of predators are found, the manoos and the maga will not be.

# The other great enemy of the M&Ms are the “English speaking convent educated city-slickers”. These are mutant manoos and magas who have been banished from the manoos and maga societies, but nonetheless continue to cause harm by speaking and communicating English. A good way of identifying a manoos or maga is to speak English in public and look for a massive contortion of face, resulting in an emission of hate rays in your direction.

Thanks to the efforts of the MNS and the KRV, the manoos and the maga have not yet gone extinct and continue to survive somewhere.

We ask all right minded members of the public to keep this list handy so that they may be useful in identifying and protecting these endangered species of humanity.

Naturally M&Ms may react unfavourably to this notice as well since irony is far beyond them. Therefore it is advised to keep this out of their sight.

We must all do our bit to ensure that they don’t go the way of the Honest Indian Politician.

58 comments

An effort to trivialize the genuine concerns of kannadigas & marathis by the author is not going to wish away the real issues that magas & manoos raise today.

lack of true federalism, day light robbery of progressive states to feed the delinquent & rowdy BIMARU states, blatant misuse of tax-payers money to propagate a “national language” are problems not going to be wished away by blaming the magas (KRV) and the manoos (MNS). magas and manoos will continue the fight for their legitimate rights & resources in the Union of India, come what may.

wow.. i thought we can have a meaning & serious debate in here.. but Mr.Alok has dissappointed us here.. trivializing the issues being faced by Marathis & Kannadigas and cracking jokes on them is never well-argued.

grey cells show a great metabolic activity or rich (with money) enough to provide jobs for the locals of the developed country. But, not blue collared ones, alms pleaders etc…

But, when you look at the poputlation that is

migrating to the safer lands of Karnataka (I am

not qualified enough to talk about Maharastra), i

see people who belong to the blue collared ones,

alms pleaders, hermophrodites etc…

when I compare developed country with the developing one; Unions would not let outsiders take away their jobs in the former one, while in later one, an organisation avec bone has to stand up for the same cause.

Very pathetic writeup to say the least. Instead of sarcasm, you could have done your homework to know the organizations and motives. Why don’t you go to KRV’s office once and talk your grievances and complaints what you have. I am sure, you have not even thought of such a thing. Nimdenidru,, Oxford dictionary itkondu,, yaaranadru aaDakondu baredu,, tiTe tirisikollodu…
Instead of this “English speaking convent educated city-slickers” kind of attitude, suggest ways in which interests of Kannada , Karnataka, Kannadiga (K K K )can be preserved?

Don’t tell us that there is nothing wrong with K K K. If you think, there is nothing wrong with K K K , then surely you have a problem with your Brain.

“By nature, and by curious set of circumstances, the M&Ms never resort to violence themselves, and are generally patient and understanding. This however does not prevent them from quietly approving the wanton acts of destruction and mayhem caused by their supporters for perceived insults. [Note: the same behaviour is curiously also present in the “Hindu”, another threatened species on the subcontinent]”
mr.alok bloody prasanna — would you have the temerity (or to put it crudely, the balls) to accuse a muslim or a christian of the same behaviour..when its quite clear for all to see?

you and the p-sec crowd need a crowbar shoved up your backsides so that we can be saved from your pontificating bullshit

Alok,
Its easy to make fun out of vedikes that are spending their valuable time fighting for our causes – because you’re not going through the times these outfits and the people they’ve grown amidst are going through.

But its sad that you feel only these vedikes seem to belong here and that they are a different set of people altogether. It shows how you want to isolate yourself from your roots.. it shows that you dont feel like a maga or a manoo of anywhere on this land.

So why do you care, eh?! If you dont feel like belonging here, how does it matter to you what these vedikes do to save their people? Are you planning some hilarious PhD out of this topic, and is that why you wish to marry this serious issue with your stupid comedy and write on churumuri – unfortunately a place that is as confused as you’re!

For your benefit I am summarizing (from the above comments) the list of associated actions that you have to take before writing articles of this nature:

1.Hate equally: Criticize other groups that are detested by the M&M’s. This is the first principle of criticism in India.

2.Meet the M&M’s: Before you air your criticisms on a public forum, you have to personally go and discuss these issues with KRV, MNS etc. If they are in a good mood, they may let you off with a few broken bones. Nevertheless this is an essential step.

3. Use Tortoise Mosquito Coil to protect yourself from “sarcasmic” mosquitoes. The danger posed by these mosquitoes is immense. You tend to lose your sense of humor and rationality

It is indeed a wonderful opportunity for all of us to see what I have been saying all these days in all my postings.

The earlier blog on MFH and ruling of SC was hailed as a ‘Freedom of Expression’, ‘Art for art sake’, and what not.

But if someone writes an article on Kannada and Kannadigas, the very same people says it is wrong and get offended. Isn’t is amazing?

Believe me we will have more of this and more at crossroads as we go along. It is only then one will understand the true meaning of Federal Setup as put forth by the BJP and the games the century old party is playing on us in the name of Minority.

This post is not a post strictly on the article of Mr. Prasanna. As of now I have no opinion. But bringing out the hypocrisy of some people here.

I grew up in Bangalore and am now studying in Pune, so I’ve seen a lot of KRV & MNS activity.

I’d just like to say that our societies are facing troubled times and these oufits are the frustration vents of the Kannadigas and Marathis in general. I don’t justify the violence perpetrated by these groups, but can understand their sentiments.

But whether I agree with the author’s views or not, I think he’s a very brave man. Here’s praying for your safety Mr. Author!

The cartoon is just great…it symbolizes India as it is. This is a great cartoon illustrating what Alur Venkat Rao once said: “Karnatakadalli Bhaarata Ide”.

However, the exclamation on the bottom left “…and you want to remove Bihar from Maharashtra?” just makes it clear that Keshav doesn’t understand the picture of India which he himself has correctly painted! And yes, ALOK PRASANNA does not understand what India is, either.

Let me explain.

It is true that every state of India has an India inside it. There is nothing that needs to come from outside any state to make it “more like India”. Maharashtra is India. Maharashtra is complete. Now, when Biharis come to Maharasthra, they do not increase the Indian-ness of Maharashtra. The act of removing Biharis from Maharashtra does not decrease the Indian-ness of Maharashtra.

Biharis make both Bihar and Maharashtra weak. They render Bihar devoid of able-bodied men/women, take away the jobs of Marathis, and pollute Maharashtra with their disrespect for Maharashtra and Marathi. This is nothing but disrespect to India itself, as one can see in the cartoon.

The same story is true for every state of India, including Karnataka. And of course, I’m not trying to target Biharis here. I’m trying to point out flaws in the understanding of what India is.

Karnataka is India. Karnataka is complete. Kannada is its National Language.

ellaa jaati prashne swamy. next time, nimma kula-gothra ellaanu nimma hesara munde haakidare, it will be easy for us to understand where you are coming from.

Vokkaligas are the biggest thorn in the sides of twice-borns and other “high” castes in this state because they have the political, money and now even educational clout, which was enjoyed by our twice-born brothers all this time.

No other “shudra” community comes close to challenging their stranglehold on the society. DG and his family are the most public face of that community and it is easy to take pot shots at them. Its very simple, guruve.

gowdre, people understand what they are prepared to understand. you can make all the observant points you want, but if somebody in stuck in slogans and words and phrases and theories and are in love with their own knowledge of *isms, then you cant do much. emme/katte neeru/bhaavi story.

the glory of life is that certain theories, words and phrases are in great currency. you can try it as an experiment: just try to use those theories,words and phrases in various permutations and you will find yourselves in great circulation. proof by circulation.

By conveniently hijacking the Kannada-Karnataka issue to be the cause of JD (s), they are only showing their ignorance! No doubt Alok’s post is pathetic but to react in this way is highly irresponsible.

What is the big deal about Mannina Maga or Son of the Soil? Everyone who is born in Karnataka is a Mannina Maga and he/she should speak Kannada and should have a broad outlook to life with respect to Kannada foremost. Mannina Magas don’t come from a single community as ‘/.” seems to be indicating! Also, everyone with a surname Gowda is not automatically a ‘Vokkaliga’ just as not all ‘Vokkaligas’ are tillers of the land.

I have said it earlier KRV is doing some good work while there are some loud whispers of “Roll Call” and shit! I would like KRV to continue with the good work they are doing today. In one of my earlier posts KRV was heading towards GRV as in (Gowda Rakshana Vedhike) and thankfully there is Praveen Shetty’s KRV faction that provides an alternate view. Bottomline: there is no one community that is more ‘mannu’ than others in Karnataka!

As you said, everybody born in karnataka is its “maga” and “mannina maga”. Nobody is claiming exclusivity.
But to qualify as one, you have “show” your colours. Forget “karave” style patriotism, lets talk about soft, white collar patriotism.

Most of the people on this blog, I assume, are in high-tech industries or atleast in white collar jobs.

nimma ede muTkondu heLi,…
* How many of you and your kannada colleges have gone out of the way to help another kannadiga? Just compare yourself with what people of other languages do to their brothers who speak the same language irrespective of their religion and Caste Eg:malayalis.

* when people of other states have gone beyond their caste to reach out to their fellow “magas”, I see kannadigas losing out in opportunities because of the caste bias. Its in the “network” effect, BABY!!

* “musuku” haaki guddu kododanna nillisi. If you want to say that you hate Gowda’s guts, say it so. But, then … you might lack the will and “chala” to say that outright. That’s why KRV looks like GRV and VRV (even Shetty is a vokkaliga).

I think I have done enough to serve Kannada and I will continue to do more. You are welcome to trawl through this site and see what i have posted on Kannada and related issues. It is amusing to see the likes of you holding up Dirty DeveGowda as a prime example all Kannadigas should be proud of! Sorry we beg to differ. Dirty Devegowda is the worst politician to emerge out of Karnataka. That a man of his calibre became a PM is one of the greatest tragedies of this country. He has single-handedly brought back retarded thinking into the mainstream of this country. I detest Dirty Devegowda and his tricks. Why the pretence of KRV? Just call it VRV. Shame on you!

I am even slapping my thighs proudly to say that I am a true Kannadiga. People in white collar jobs are no less Kannada patriots. You don’t have to be “Roll Call” “RowdyGowda” to be a Kannada patriot. Kannadigas will certainly lose out if you start applying your blinkered VRV mentality! I think the recent assembly elections have correctly shown the excesses of Dirty Devegowda’s ‘deals’ and no body bought his Crooke’ Gowda jr’s GramaVasthavvya and shit! Karnataka has righly become the most corrupt state in the country because of this GRV/VRV mentality.

Here is just an example of Dirty Devegowda’s politics: DeJaGow in Mysore went on a fast to force the Central Govt. to make Kannada a classical language. Dirty Devegowda did not bat an eyelid; he was busy politicking and backstabbing his own partymen. So much for the retard Dirty Devegowda’s concern for Kannada! The same retard sold RS seats to MAM Ramaswamy and BPL’ s Chandrashekar. Wow what a great Son of the Soil!! and these are the leaders who will help Kannadigas? You must be joking!

Thanks for the correction on GRV’s Praveen Shetty faction. Very soon we will have an HVG (Haloorige Vulidhone Gowda) faction. In my humble opinion any one who is opposing natural progress is a Dirty Devegowda!

For example, OddVani is a Nuclear Devegowda; Mamatha Bannerji is Nano Devegowdathi;

Looks like you have fallen into the trap of equating anybody who talks about the word “Gowda” is a supporter of Devegowda.

No need to get your patapati chaddi in a twist.. samadhana takaLi.

These were the points I was trying to make in my earlier posts:

* Most of the attacks on DG and family are based on the fact that he is a “Gowda” first. He becoming dirtiest and play on “mannu”/”maga” is a soundbyte created by news media (we all know who are they, 90% eh). You say the same thing, whether true, lie or a exaggerated claim, it starts sounding true after a while. Now that we all “know” that he is da dirtiest, can we move on to others like the Reddy clan and the congress clowns?

* I’m not claiming DG is the epitome of kannadiganess. If you read it like that, take out your DG (Dolce and Gabbana, w00t!!) goggles. I was making a general humbatana of all Gowdas. not DG in particular. Gowdaru != DG.

* All the politicians of Karnataka have sold out kannada’s interest. BJP is no different. look at Venkaiah Naidu.

Is it wise to make a blanket statement about not caring about a statutory office holders life!! What if ( not that it holds for Yeddi or for that matter DG) they regularly took decisions of Office when under the influence of drugs or let their love/lust life influence their decisions!!!!

Great comments by Ramesh & others. I am adding my own.
These are strictly tongue in cheek. No offence intended to anyone.
# MAMAs (M&M attackers) are always employable and in respectable professions.
#MAMAs are generally thick skinned and immune to insults.
#MAMAs have a high affinity towards blogs and love to litter those with a high volume of words. The more the merrier.
#MAMAs are the ultimate survivors as they can adapt themselves to any given situation and become one with any grouping be it outsiders or locals. So they can never be endangered.
#MAMAs pride themselves on having a funny bone. This funny bone shows up strongly when they are attacking MMs.
#MAMAs go to great lengths to point out the difference between themselves and M&Ms. Most of their attacks on M&Ms take the form of sarcasm.
#Both M&Ms and MAMAs have a lot of time on their hands.

* Most of the attacks on DG and family are based on the fact that he is a “Gowda” first. He becoming dirtiest and play on “mannu”/”maga” is a soundbyte created by news media (we all know who are they, 90% eh). You say the same thing, whether true, lie or a exaggerated claim, it starts sounding true after a while. Now that we all “know” that he is da dirtiest, can we move on to others like the Reddy clan and the congress clowns?
/**Dirty Devegowda is detested because he is a retard; he made some unforgettable gaffes when he was PM: have you heard of Davos 67 conferenece? Gowda took an entire ‘parivar’ of 67 to visit Davos in Greece. That is something not to be sneered at! People detest him because he is a moron and he is full of contrarian opinions and impulses: when they were planning for Bangalore subway train system, the moron claimed that the train gauge was too small because the farmers cannot transport their produce!! :) Isn’t that hilarious? Now if that was a joke, we could have left it that. Then this retard produced some techno-jumbo-mumbo to prove he was right! I can list hundreds of such low-level cunning pronouncements Dirty Devegowda made earlier and he continues to make them. I don’t think people attack him because he is a Gowda**.//

* I’m not claiming DG is the epitome of kannadiganess. If you read it like that, take out your DG (Dolce and Gabbana, w00t!!) goggles. I was making a general humbatana of all Gowdas. not DG in particular. Gowdaru != DG.
/**Not at all. This ‘humbathana’ is contrived by Dirty Devegowda and his sons. They bring it on whenever it suits them. It is actually low-cunning.**//

* All the politicians of Karnataka have sold out kannada’s interest. BJP is no different. look at Venkaiah Naidu.

//**Sure but BJP is at least a national party and they have some latitude in engaging in such elects like Naidu. I am not justifying that as well but at least they did not SELL THEIR RS SEAT for money like Dirty Devegowda did to MAM Ramasawmy and BPL’s Chandrashekar. That is the DIFFERENCE! Do you get it now?**//

I just explained the BJP’s RS seats vs JD (S) RS Seats. BTW if six MLAs of Andhra origin get elected why are you depressed? They won in a democratic system and they happen to be the local “Gani Gowdas” who happen to speak Telugu. That’s all. What is your logic? I don’t follow. I have a feeling you have no capacity for understanding issues of any kind!

Everyone knows how BJP was helped by bellary money power akka gaNi daNi to win the elections.Now don’t tell me about the petty 67 incident.

Everyone knows why bellary gaNi danis were given ministerial seats neglecting experienced members like yogish bhatt,shankarlinge gowda and anekal narayan swamy who were selected 4 to 5 times.All know that was because of money power which bellary gaNi daNi brought with them.

Why don’t you speak a word against yeddi?why only devegowda looks dirty?

ella jaathi saar,ella jaathi saar.

yeddi made sure that shobha gets minister post by crushing the hopes of shankuntala shetty.adhu dirty family politics alwa(weather is it official family or not,its another matter )?

kailaagadhavara tara hinde yuddha maDbeDa.gowDra tara mundhe yuddha maDodhu kali.(Now don’t equate this to DG.DG is not the only gowda.)

may be then you can build organisations like KRV or VRV(in your eyes) and lead them.

Why is Gowda 67 AKA Davos 67 a petty incident? That is the highest form of impropriety and corruption by a PM! Sure Gani Gowdas helped BJP but what is illegal about that?!! Even if Yeddy has ignored his own partymen and women to offer outsiders positions, that won’t make him corrupt. Yeddi will pay for some dissent though. BTW I have always spoken out against every corrupt moron and unfortunately Dirty Devegowda and Sons are way up high in my list!

I think I did ask you earlier about the crores of rupees even Dirty Devegowdas grandchildren possess according to records before EC. I think you seem to have quietly done the same thing: “kailaagadhavara tara hinde yuddha maDbeDa.gowDra tara mundhe yuddha maDodhu kali”
Where is your explanation on that? When I hit you with the correct facts you run screaming and invent some new ones:)

Every politisian is a damn corrupt.You told getting help from gaNi daNi’s.Its not help,they violated all norms.1000 rs were distributed to people to win votes.You can go and ask any person in bellary region.

A gentleman like MP prakash lost to sheer money power.

Kumaraswamy posses 50 crores property.That is very much less amount than many big heads like nagamarapalli who has 150 crores or PG sindhia who has 130 crores or DK shivakumar who has 76 crores or many else from BJP members.

Every one are corrupt.But if you say DG id dirtiest support with the facts.Come up with his property details.Lets really check it with other big fishes.If you can show that he is the biggest fish,”I promise you that I will never support him”.

This time i am not screaming.I have come up with facts.BTW, Revanna’s declared property is 4 crores and kumaraswamy was a buissness prior to entering politics.

Even a just 2 time winner somanna(previously) has declared 30 crores property.

Please show with facts that Dg is dirtiest by beating the above figures.But golden question is can you do it?Or do you really know anything about it?Or are you just imaging the property DG posses and making a mind calculation of it?

It is getting increasignly difficult to understand your fascination with Dirty Devegowda and Sons but I will try. My comments in capital letters:

Every politisian is a damn corrupt.You told getting help from gaNi daNi’s.Its not help,they violated all norms.1000 rs were distributed to people to win votes.You can go and ask any person in bellary region. //YES I DID AND THEY TOLD ME GANI GOWDAS WERE HAPPY TO SHARE THEIR WEALTH WITH THE COMMON PEOPLE OF BELLARY! YEAH 1K NOTES X 1000K PEOPLE = 10 RAISED TO POWER OF 9. SO GO AHEAD AND COMPUTE HOW MANY CRORES THAT ONE IS//

A gentleman like MP prakash lost to sheer money power. //YES BUT REMEMBER EVERYONE IS CORRUPT SO YOU MEANT TO SAY A CORRUPT GENTLEMAN LIKE MP PRAKASH LOST TO SHEER MONEY POWER!//

Kumaraswamy posses 50 crores property.That is very much less amount than many big heads like nagamarapalli who has 150 crores or PG sindhia who has 130 crores or DK shivakumar who has 76 crores or many else from BJP members. //YES KUMARASWAMY HAS DECLARED 50 CRORES BUT HE HAS PARKED 200 CRORES WITH RADHIKA AND A FEW FUNDRED CRORES WITH HIS OTHER FOLLOWERS//

Every one are corrupt.But if you say DG id dirtiest support with the facts.Come up with his property details.Lets really check it with other big fishes.If you can show that he is the biggest fish,”I promise you that I will never support him”. //I THINK I CANNOT BE YOUR “THALE DOCTOR” YOU HAVE TO SEE SPECIALISTS AT PLACES LIKE NIMHANS. ALSO I CANNOT WEAN YOU AWAY FROM YOUR ‘ORIGINAL THINKING’ IF I CAN ADVISE YOU BOLDLY I SUGGEST YOU MEET THE HUMBLE FARMER PERSONALLY AND ASK HIM HOW COME A HUMBLE FARMER IS SUCH A WEALTHY MAN AND STILL SO HUMBLE? YOU CAN LET HIM KNOW THAT DB THE DABBE GOWDA SENT YOU PERSONALLY!//

This time i am not screaming.I have come up with facts.BTW, Revanna’s declared property is 4 crores and kumaraswamy was a buissness prior to entering politics. //I KNOW YOU SEEM TO BE READY FOR THE NEXT STEP CALLED HEAVY REALITY DOSE MEDICATION! REVANNA ACTUALLY LOOKS LIKE A “NALAKH KOTI BHIKARI” WITH HIS MENDICANTS GET UP AND A FACE THAT REVEALS CONTEMPT FOR EARTHLY RICHES; HE ALSO LOOKS LIKE A DISINTERESTED NATIVE SOCRATES WITH HIS COMMENTS AND MANNERISMS. YES KUMARANNA WAS IN BUSINESS OF POLITICS GETTING THINGS DONE FOR A FEE.//

Even a just 2 time winner somanna(previously) has declared 30 crores property. //SOMANNA IS A GREAT MAN! AT LEAST HE DECLARED 30 CRORES CONSIDERING HE ONLY CONTESTED FROM REAL SLUMS LIKE BINNY PET AND SO ON. GOD BLESS HIS NOBLE SOUL!//

Please show with facts that Dg is dirtiest by beating the above figures.But golden question is can you do it?Or do you really know anything about it?Or are you just imaging the property DG posses and making a mind calculation of it? //I HAVE TRIED TO SHOW YOU IN MY OWN WAY! REST IS UP TO THE “THALE DOCTORS” IN YOUR CASE!//

prashnegaLu yeSthu prashnegaLagi irutte antha noDoNa!!! //YOU HAVE A QUESTIONING MIND THAT IS UNFETTERED BY CONVENTIONAL LOGIC AND WISDOM! IN FACT YOU SHOULD TAKE OVER FROM DIRTY DEVEGOWDA AND SONS AND MAKE JD (S) YOUR OWN!//

PS: don’t throw me links from statement of Kheny….//YEAH I WON’T I KNOW THAT YOU ARE REALLY UPSET ABOUT HIM//

I request those who have reacted harshly against the author above to reconsider. The author is not ridiculing anyone’s legitimate fight for rights.All
he has done is that he has sarcastically disapproved the regionalistic tendencies that have infected these claims. Why are We Indians so insecure and volatile about everything but unbelievably passive and unreasonably tolerant where the real fight has to be done. Please understand-amma,ma,aai…call her by whatever name…she is still the same..she loves her child and cries for him the same way…see her in Bharatmata…i agree with “indian bole to indian”