Friday, 19 April 2019

TALKING SPRING STYLE AND MENTAL HEALTH

Now that Spring has finally sprung, I wanted to kick this seasons style edit off by sharing this bold and fresh yellow blouse with you. When I first spotted this gorgeous stand out shade, hidden amongst the vintage glory on a rail in the covent garden Rokit store. I knew I had to quickly try it on and nab it. Today's look has been completely styled around the fabulous blouse with a pair of wide leg high waisted frayed comfy jeans, a pointy black leather statement boot (that I've been living in and finally found! See here for reference), banging seventies inspired super frames and mums (Flora Maria) old beautiful vintage detailed brown snakeskin clutch. Finishing the effortless look with a loose fitting suede vintage jacket, which I've had for years and is so perfect for throwing on for laying if it gets cold. You can see how everything pieced together really subtly compliments each other. And you can also get a lot of wear out of each individual piece mixed with other fabulous pieces in your wardrobe as well. Like styling the booties with a fun summer vintage dress, or pop a retro t-shirt on with the bargain jeans or piece some vintage denim shorts and white mules against the colourful blouse. Yellow is the ultimate shade for spring this year and I can't wait to style more of it.

Okay so it does seem a little odd to jump from talking about colourful style to mental health but if you've been reading my blogs from the start, you’ll know I don't really do the norm. I've been wanting to talk more on mental health with you for a while. Especially with the sudden sadden loss of Mike Thalassitis. I remember watching the show (Love Island), with Mikes entrance and thinking who the heck is this very handsome confident guy. Mike immediately grabbed the attention of viewers and made a strong mark on the series. So to hear about the news of his passing was such a huge shock. Of course I didn't know Mike and never met him but I really did feel affected by the news. Then it got me debating whether, was it only a real shock because he was in the public eye. And how so many people that are suffering from mental health go unnoticed every single day.

Including myself in the past being one of them......Now I do want to say before I carry on with this post, that I am no way a doctor, therapist or anyone trained to address the psychological factors and thinking behind mental health. So all I can do is be honest with you and just share a snippet of my own personal experience with it. You may also be wondering why share about a topic which is so difficult to know where to start and talk about. But the main reason for this post is for you - that maybe going through difficulties with mental health yourself. For you - who wants to understand possibly for someone you care about struggling with mental health, and for you - who wants a clearer insight and understanding on a topic that is increasingly so complex and rising.

From being someone who has felt depression derived from immediate grief (I lost my mum at 26), I would constantly receive offers of help. People I knew would say I'm here for you and your grief, and even people that I wasn't remotely close to would offer help. But in my worse state of depression I didn't want their help. In fact the thought of anyone thinking that I needed help angered and triggered my depression even more. Even though deep down I knew that what I was feeling wasn't like me and wasn't right. I didn't want help because I didn't want to help myself. I had lost the main focus of my life. A woman who I looked up to and knew would always be there no matter what, had vanished. So in my mind back then in a way my whole purpose for life had vanished too. I couldn't see the point of my existence and had nothing left to live for, and the feeling as I remember was very overwhelming and isolating. It's such a predicament to want to help someone you care about that quite obviously hasn't truly identified that they need help. But even at that lowest point I was still going to work, seeing people putting on a front and in their eyes out of closed doors ‘I was pulling through and carrying on'. So what I'm trying to say is 1. Mental health isn't always as obvious as you think, the happiest person who looks the most out there together can be suffering. And 2. Until I was ready to get help myself no one or nothing anyone said or did could help me. It was something I had to finally acknowledge and address myself. I had to tell myself that I was strong, I was kind, I was beautiful, I was caring, I was intelligent, I was wild, I was giving, I was talented, I was respectful, I was funny, I was down to earth, I was loving and I can see the positives in life. I had to build myself up again. I started to do yoga which really helped the bad thoughts trickling in my head. Exercising by running also made me physically feel fit and strong too.

I'm not sure what I wanted to achieve by sharing a perspective with you, but I do know I don't want to hear that the rate of suicide is rising, especially in men. I do also think that accountability has to be spoken more about and addressed. I can't truly place all blame onto social media but I do believe it can play a part. We as instagrammers, bloggers, readers, writers and social media phone lovers have to be mindful of what we portray. I've always been honest that I'm literally a 30's something fabulous hot mess. But try and pick and delete who you follow if you have to, take time away from social media and the intensity of your phone by giving yourself little phone breaks. I like inspiring people whether that’s through style or the acting projects I do. But I'll always be and stay 100% true X

(For support and help on mental health issues raised please do contact the wonderful charity Mind. I want to continue to talk about mental health because I would of loved to of read a blog like this to help me through some tougher times. Mental health doesn't have to be and shouldn't be shoved under the carpet and not a discussed 'thing' if we don't want it to. Thanks for reading xXx)