And those who sneer at our prolific playwright, dismissing him as some stuffy
old relic from the past with no relevance to modern life, should get thee to
a nunnery…

Shakespeare was the Jay Z of his day. An artist with the common touch, whose
words spoke to the masses. He had crowds flocking to his shows — some of
which were later BANNED by the Puritans for being too racy.

Arguably, without the complex, bloody Complete Works of Will, we might not be
enjoying such cutting-edge TV series as Breaking Bad and The Wire.

His grisly scenes in King Lear, Macbeth and Titus Andronicus give Quentin
Tarantino a run for his money.

And the plot of Richard II is practically a blueprint for Game Of Thrones.

Shakespeare, who was born and died on St George’s Day, is also the real patron
saint of Englishness. As well as the examples above, he also gave us the
word “fashionable” and common phrases such as “mum’s the word” and “salad
days”.

As the great man said himself “brevity is the soul of wit”. So to mark his
450th Bard-day we have summarised all 37 of his plays.

And our Hold Ye Front Page guru JOHN PERRY has created these brilliant
Sun front pages.

Henry IV (PT 1)

WHILE Henry fights rebellions, his son Hal goes out boozing with his
disreputable mates, including tubby prankster Falstaff. They join the army
to protect the King, but as Hal shows his bravery, Falstaff plays dead on
the battlefield – then convinces almost everyone he is the hero of the day.
Well, he was almost 100 per cent proof.

Henry IV (PT 2)

ROUGHLY the same plot as for Henry IV Part One, except that young Hal is
crowned King Henry V and rejects his old mucker, boozy tubster Falstaff, as
an unsuitable influence.

“No more unto the breach, dear friend.”

As You Like It

A DUKE is exiled by his brother and both men’s daughters run off to a forest
with their jester.

Despite, or perhaps because of, much cross-dressing, almost everyone ends up
marrying and the Duke is returned to his throne.

Love’s Labour’s Lost

THE King of Navarre and three noble pals vow to give up women for three years
of study and fasting.

But they soon fall for a princess and her ladies-in-waiting and get engaged,
though the ladies insist the men wait a year and a day to prove their love.

Hamlet

THE Prince of Denmark pretends to be mad as he plots revenge against his uncle
for killing his dad, but his girlfriend really does go loopy and kills
herself.

Hamlet is wounded but kills his uncle before he dies. His mum also kills
herself. More lunacy and blood-letting than a Tarantino movie.

Taming Of The Shrew

A FATHER will only let his daughter Bianca marry once someone has taken his
older daughter off his hands – the nagging, shrewish Katherina. Petruchio
does marry her, and tames her by being annoying and disagreeing with
everything she says.

Two Gentlemen Of Verona

TWO gents argue over women in Milan, and despite some cross-dressing confusion
they end up with the right brides. But before that happy ending there is a
banishment, mistaken identity and death threats from a band of outlaws to
contend with.

Merry Wives Of Windsor

FALSTAFF is very short of cash so he tries to get off with some wealthy
married women from Windsor.

But they play practical jokes on him, including throwing him into a laundry
basket and forcing him to pretend to be a fat dame from Brentford.

Macbeth

GENERAL Macbeth is promised the throne of Scotland by three old hags, so he
and his wife murder the King, convinced that no man “of woman born” can
defeat him.

But Macduff, who was born by caesarian section, leads an army and kills
Macbeth. “Is this the small print I see before me?”

All’s Well That Ends Well

LOWLY-born Helena falls for Count Bertram, who is way out of her league. But
when she cures the King he promises her the hand of any man she chooses. She
picks Bertram, who legs it. Helena follows and tricks him into becoming a
faithful husband.

The Winter’s Tale

KING Leontes goes mad and accuses his wife of cheating. He orders their baby
to be killed and his wife seemingly dies of shock. But 16 years later he
finds the baby was not killed after all – and his wife had merely
temporarily turned into a statue.

Henry VIII

AIDED by the scheming Cardinal Wolsey, King Henry divorces Catherine of Aragon
so he can marry her lady-in-waiting, Anne Boleyn.

Things end happily – at least for England – as she gives birth to the future
Queen Elizabeth I.

Twelfth Night

TYPICAL boy-meets-girl love story, except that girl dressed as a boy and fell
in love with a boy who fancied another girl who fell in love with the girl’s
twin brother.

All ends happily and a scheming official is punished by being made to wear
yellow socks.

Sort that one out, Gok Wan!

Cymbeline

POSTHUMUS is in love with King Cymbeline’s daughter Imogen but the Queen plots
against their love and Posthumus’s pal Iachimo pretends to have made love to
Imogen.

True love wins out, even if Imogen does end up dressed as a boy.

Antony & Cleopatra

ANTONY ends up joint ruler of Rome, but prefers to spend his time sleeping
with sexy Egyptian temptress Cleopatra instead. Augustus gets tired of this
and goes to war against Antony, who flees and kills himself.

Then Cleopatra kills herself with a snake. She always did have a pert little
asp.

Pericles

PRINCE Pericles ends up shipwrecked by a storm, then enters and wins a
tournament despite having rusty armour. His prize is the hand of Thaisa,
daughter of King Simonides. She gives birth to a baby, Mariana, but appears
to die in a different shipwreck. Pericles meets his daughhter later and,
guided by a dream, finds out his wife is still alive.

King Lear

OLD Lear’s plan to divide his kingdom between his three daughters drives them
apart and ends with murder and suicide. The Earl of Gloucester’s inheritance
plans are also disastrous, with one son killing the other. Lear goes mad,
then dies, which just goes to prove – where there’s a will there’s… a
family row.

Two Noble Kinsmen

PALAMON and Arcite, cousins and best friends, compete for the love of Emilia
while in jail as prisoners of war. Once they are free, they agree to a fair
fight for her.

Arcite is thrown off his horse and dies, and Palamon marries Emilia.

Julius Caesar

THE hero, Caesar, is betrayed and murdered by treacherous Brutus, Cassius and
their friends. Antony, Caesar’s friend, incites his “friends, Romans and
countrymen” against the conspirators and leads an army against them. Brutus
and Cassius kill themselves. “Caesar adsum iam forte; Brutus aderat”, as my
Latin teacher used to say.

The Comedy Of Errors

TWO sets of identical twins of different social classes are separated at
birth. But after travelling the world they all meet up again in a slapstick
confusion of mistaken identities. And they all lived happily ever after.

Romeo & Juliet

TWO young lovers are from feuding families. When Romeo is exiled for killing
Juliet’s cousin, she fakes her death to be with him. But Romeo didn’t get
the memo. He poisons himself in grief and Juliet kills herself for real. And
you thought Facebook status updates were unreliable!

Timon Of Athens

WEALTHY Timon shares his riches with his friends but they abandon him when the
money runs out.

Timon ends up living in a cave, where he finds gold which he uses to finance
an attack on Athens.

Finally he dies in the wilderness, a bitter man.

Troilus & Cressida

TROJAN prince Troilus falls for a Greek beauty living in his home city which
is under siege by Greek soldiers.

He is heartbroken when Cressida flees the city with Greek general Diomedes.

The Tempest

FORMER Duke of Milan and part-time magician Prospero lives on an island with
his daughter Miranda, a slave called Caliban and a spirit, Ariel.

He was cast adrift by his brother Antonio who, conspiring with Alonso, the
King of Naples, usurped his position as Duke. When Antonio is on a ship
sailing past, Prospero conjures up a tempest which leaves his brother and
various nobles shipwrecked on the island, leading to Prospero regaining his
title.

Othello

VENETIAN general Othello (who’s black) falls for Governor’s daughter Desdemona
(who’s white) but is conned by his aide Iago into thinking she loves another
officer. Othello smothers Desdemona and kills himself. All the intrigue of a
chess match, but Othello should have checked his mate.

Titus Andronicus

TITUS kills the eldest son of the Queen of the Goths. In revenge she arranges
to have his daughter raped and her hands and tongue chopped off. In
response, Titus kills the Queen’s remaining sons and serves them to her in a
pie.

Henry VI (PT 1)

HENRY V has died unexpectedly and his son, the young King Henry VI, is under
the thumb of landowning barons.

He fights Joan of Arc in France and conquers the city of Rouen but
subsequently loses England’s French territories.

Henry VI (PT 2)

KING Henry’s barons bicker and his closest adviser, the popular Duke of
Gloucester, is killed.

Meanwhile, Richard of York reveals his claim to the throne to the Earls of
Salisbury and Warwick, who pledge to support him. Civil war looms.

A Midsummer Night’s Dream

STAR-CROSSED lovers include a man called Bottom, whose head is transformed
into that of a donkey as a prank by Puck, the servant of the King of the
Fairies. But all the relationships work out well in the end.

Henry VI (PT 3)

CIVIL war breaks out in the shape of the Wars of the Roses.

Richard of York, who will eventually become the wicked Richard III, stabs
Henry, who as he dies, predicts Richard’s future villainy and the chaos that
will engulf the nation.

Coriolanus

ROMAN general Coriolanus defeats the city’s enemies the Volscians but is then
exiled and ends up fighting for them instead.

However, when he comes up with a peace treaty between the warring parties the
Volscians turn on Coriolanus and kill him.

Henry V

TRYING to play down his wild past, King Henry decides to invade France. He
sails across the Channel with a small band of brothers, defeating the French
hordes at the Battle of Agincourt. He later weds a French princess and they
have a son, but there are signs of trouble ahead.