So sorry to have missed this: Noted Newt Gingrich supporter Chuck Norris last week attempted to shore up his candidate's standing ahead of presidential primaries in Southern states including Mississippi and Alabama, contributing his own riff on the automated telecommunications scourge known as the robocall. As you likely know, Gingrich lost. Hell, we all lost.more »

It was cute a few weeks ago, but now it's just sort of embarrassing: "As a six-time undefeated middleweight world karate champion, I have a pretty good idea what makes a warrior. And there’s presently one particular presidential candidate in the political ring who wears those gloves better than the others. Even when he’s knocked down, he has astounding agility and rebound. It’s one thing to enter a ring with a single opponent, but what if you had to enter with three: one candidate with unlimited reservoirs of wealth and two titans of political swing to back him? That is exactly what former Speaker Newt Gingrich is facing right now." [WND]

Or some other lukewarm cling-monkey: "If I were feeling less generous and more cynical on this holiest of all Oscar-calendar mornings, I might say that to decipher this year’s Academy Awards contest, we need only look for inspiration to the GOP presidential race. The Artist is Mitt Romney — desperate to please, doesn’t stand for anything in particular, not especially popular with the general public, will eventually keep most of its money offshore, and, though dinged up and trash-talked, will probably cross the finish line first by default. The Descendants is Newt Gingrich (emotionally unsteady, hard on wives, doing better than expected, but probably can’t go all the way). Hugo is Rick Santorum (a little slow, doesn’t really like anything that changed in the culture in the last 80 years). And The Tree of Life is Jon Huntsman (believes in evolution, probably a little too classy for this field)." [Grantland]