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I didn't see any of the world leaders recently eulogizing Nelson Mandela. However, according to news reports, the sign-language interpreter sharing the stage with Obama and Co. wasn't doing anything remotely resembling sign language.

Responding to accusations that he had spent the entire event gesticulating incoherently at the soccer stadium's thousands, the individual in question claimed that he had been hallucinating and hearing voices throughout the whole thing.

Apparently, he has a history of mental issues. A most reassuring scenario, considering he was standing closer to the world leaders than any security personnel.

Imagine how picturesque it could have been: world leader, giving dignified speech to the word, when suddenly the "sign-language interpreter" jumps, mounts and batters him, yelling: "GO BACK TO YOUR HOME PLANET!!! YOU...YOU'RE NOT LAYING ANY MORE EGGS IN MY BRAAAAAIN!!!!".

So I've been following this **** as closely as I can, because its fucking embarrassing.

As far as I can tell this douche-canoe has to be a friend or family member of an ANC (ruling party) high-up. He's been on the scene for at least a year or two and has displayed similar levels of fail at other events.

The South African deaf community are totally outraged over this **** too, they've apparently warned the ANC about this imbecile in the past.

There's also a video that's just turned up of him standing next to our wonderful president in 2012 while he sings "Shoot the boer".

A recent news reports claims that those in charge of the company that contracted this man out to the South African government have "vanished into thin air".

What better incentive could there be for becoming a world leader? You're on some foreign stage, giving a speech next to a "sign-language interpreter", and all your close-protection personnel are scanning the crowd for signs of trouble.

In the midst of your elocution, you notice the nearby "interpreter" is scanning you for longer and longer periods. Facial tics start deforming one side of his head with increasing frequency and intensity, baring more and more teeth in a famished rictus. The eye on that side, meanwhile, is almost closed while the other eye has gone so wide you can measure his pulse merely by watching the blood vessels around the iris.

You're relatively sure that the "nyick...jick...jick" now coming from his lopsided grin has no relation to ASL, but--not being familiar with all sign-language systems worldwide--you don't wish to possibly offend your hosts (who, presumably, have vetted this individual and declared him safe).

Trying not to notice the random soliloquy developing beside you, you attempt to hurry through the rest of your speech and are near the end--when the figure next to you suddenly looms into your personal space and, before you realize what's happened, you're on the tiles, gazing up at his rage-deformed countenance as it drools total incoherence into your terrified face, madness-strengthened hands forming an iron circle around your neck while others try fruitlessly to tear him away from you.

The very last sound you hear from your assailant makes you think of your childhood: it's the very same rapid chuckle you used to love so much in Looney-Tunes' Taz character. Your very last thought: was it for this that you campaigned, for months, to win an election?

Trying not to notice the random soliloquy developing beside you, you attempt to hurry through the rest of your speech and are near the end--when the figure next to you suddenly looms into your personal space and, before you realize what's happened, you're on the tiles, gazing up at his rage-deformed countenance as it drools total incoherence into your terrified face, madness-strengthened hands forming an iron circle around your neck while others try fruitlessly to tear him away from you.