It goes like this: A producer, willowy and female (think Gale Anne Hurd; think Sherry Lansing) is standing alone on the rue d'Antibes, near its eastern, less-travelled end, waiting for her ride to a party at Cap d'Antibes.

THE sourpusses of the twittering classes have taken against the willowy and superb Fiona Bruce's ability to hold interviews in French and Italian and, even worse, allow herself to be filmed strolling round Paris and Florence.

VIJAY SINGH looked a beaten man when closing with a round of 75 at Carnoustie on Sunday and the willowy Fijian will need to call on all his golfaholic enthusiasm for the game if he is to bounce back in Canada today.

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