Computing

Recently, I understood the reality of life and death when I visited my uncle admitted in the hospital. Brought in a very critical condition, he had the whole family praying for his speedy recovery. Everyone pretended to ignore the fear of the inevitable reality staring us in the face, promoting a brave exterior wrapped in the weak and fearful interior. Of course, the doctors had the 'never say die attitude' and we all flourished under that secure umbrella of our make-belief world.

Slowly the whole scenario got comfortable. Men started discussing business and politics, women attended to their desire for learning more about materialistic needs, the youngsters to the latest flick, SMS and MMS sessions. Tea and coffee did munificent rounds and then it became a subtle picnic. It was only the closest of all who sat mutely, their words transforming into prayers. Observing them all, I squirmed with unease. Have we all become so materialistic or insensitive that we are still planning for the future as if none would change if this man does not survive his ordeal!

During the course of a sensitive conversation with my aunt, I learnt that my uncle was all alone at home when he realized that something was terribly wrong and he needed a doctor. The frantic calls he made to whomsoever he could find before he passed out on the floor sent shivers down my spine. My mind wandered to the scary situation where a person sees his death with his own eyes. I wondered what his thoughts must have been in those few seconds. What was going on in his mind, who did he think of at that point of time? Had he resigned to his fate or was he trying to fight till the end? My eyes welled as my mind tried to seek answers to its own queries.

Life and death are the two biggest realities in the cycle of our evolution. Nothing has ever touched us so closely and nothing ever will. The inevitability of the latter teaches us the importance of the former. Yet, our whole life, we keep planning and preparing for a better existence than gearing up for what will come to all of us someday. Are we so na've as to deny the existence of death or is it that our pretentious nature goes beyond life itself. Our logical mind understands its existence and yet we are illogical enough to think that it happens to others and not us. It's around us but not for us. We live our life for eternity, unplanned subsistence oblivious to nature's truth.

Sometimes I am glad that God became the sole proprietor of deciding the time of birth and death. There are two ways of examining this statement. Had we known the time of birth we would have planned to the last detail'the position of the stars, the perfect horoscope and the right day of bringing the child into this imperfect world. Similarly if I know the time of my death, I would probably stop living, being so unnerved under the weight of this knowledge. I would die before I am actually dead. The flip side could be that I would try and enjoy my life to the fullest as long as I have it!

There is no denying the fact that we all fear death. Not because we think that people who will be left mourning for us will be unable to survive without us. It's foolhardy to believe that anyone would die without us. What we really fear is giving up everything we built around us'.leaving it all. Wise men say love not what was never yours. You came empty handed and you shall leave like that too when death comes knocking on your door. If we prepare for death, we will be able to live life to the fullest. We would do things with a righteous approach.

Everyone's fate in the end is the same, yet the heart yearns for things that make us more equal that others. The truth remains that no one remembers anybody. I will be forgotten like the news on old newspaper. Ironically, only death anniversaries will remind those (who wish to remember me) that I ever existed. For the rest life is the accepted truth, and death a reality best forgotten. It's a charade. What I witnessed at the hospital was a reality that our hypothetical existence made the world go round, making death just another speed breaker. Everyone will cross it in matter of time. Till then, life remains a celebration'how short, none would ever know!