June 10, 2006

A couple of months ago I dictated this through voice recognition during one of my trips home from Kansas City....

Purposes and Plans...

Purposes and plans

The other day, at lunch, we somehow got onto the topic of plans and purposes. That is God’s plan and God’s purpose for each of our lives. I guess this was fresh in my mind because we had just touched on the topic in a class I was taking on John Wesley’s Theology and Ethics. The more I hear “God has a purpose for your life” or “God has a plan for you” the more uncomfortable I become with those phrases. Perhaps my tension comes from some of the radio stations that I scan through during my six hour commute between

Wichita

and

Kansas City

. I have to say that the stations that I get late at on the way home, especially the Christian stations, are a bit more interesting than the stations that I can get in the middle of the day when I commute to Kansas City. Over and over again I continue to hear this phrase, “God has a plan for your life.” While I might agree that God has a plan for each of our lives I continually experience frustration or tension through the means by which this notion is communicated.

March 30, 2006

Well.... this morning was my final morning at Mount St. Scholastica. I made it for morning praise at 6:30 and Eucharist at 7:15, both were peaceful and intense at the same time. Sr. Micaela led the way once again and helped me find my way through the liturgy. During the Eucharist meditation, a monk from the monastery down the road spoke to us about perceptions. His meditation was grounded in the Hebrew Bible narrative that talks about Moses going back up the hill with two more tablets and Aaron making a Golden Calf to appease God's chosen people. The meditation challenged us, or me anyways, to put my perceptions in check with reality, and was a good reminder how misguided perceptions can lead us away from the main purpose of the mission that guides us.

The liturgy for the Eucharist filled the air with a sacred mist. I did, however, find my thoughts wandering off on the topic of transubstantiation, wondering at which moment in the liturgy this took place. As well, I was a bit distracted by the fact that the table is not 'open'. Sr. Micaela explained that some visitors do receive the elements, but out of respect I just stayed in my seat. I guess I'm still working out, in my mind, the theology of a closed table.

Before I left town I had a chance to visit Pastor Eduardo at the Atchison UMC and then I spent a few minutes visiting the Abbey and Monastery that houses the Benedictine Monks. All in all it was a dandy trip, I got some studying done, some sleep, and had an opportunity to witness monastic life in action. As I said before, I was truly amazed by the level of devotion of the sisters and their willingness to accept me for a couple of days. Many of them remembered my name each time we passed by one another, and all were gracious and accommodating.

March 29, 2006

Today began day two of my excellent monastic adventure... When I arrived last night I was just in time for vespers, the evening meal and a tour. This morning started with morning praise @ 6:30, which I missed (I did get some quality rest from 9 last night to 9 this morning), lunch, and then Midday Prayer. The retreat center is empty, so I had the second floor all to myself for reading and studying between meals and prayers. My main study task is Buddhism, which seems a bit weird due to my environment, but there does appear to be some parallels regarding monastic living. I am amazed by the presence of peace around here. It (peace) was so uncomfortable at one point, I had to check my email just to get my blood cookin' again and for a brief reality check. At meal time, Sr. Micaela has been giving me a St. Benedict history lesson with a few short lesson on the development of this monastery which was founded in 1863. The name Mount St.Scholastica comes from St . Benedict's twin sister Scholastica. At one point there were 600 sisters here, now there are about 190. As I mentioned earlier, Sr. Micaela has been here for 50 years. As I thought about her time here, the image of 'practicing the presence of God' came to mind. The commitment and devotion of the Sisters seems to be unparalleled by my meager level of devotion. Each time that we gathered for prayer there was Psalm chanting, readings, silence (a bit different from the United Methodist 12 second bit), and prayers. During prayer time there was consistent praying for peace, the abolishment of the death penalty, and for the issue of poverty. At Vespers the Sisters prayed for those who had gone on to see the glory of the Lord as well as other celebrations and concerns. Each time they prayed together, they prayed by name for individuals on Death Row. Everyone up here is extremely pleasant and peaceful, which is a bit hard to get used to. Today has been a pretty good day. I had a chance to read, and spend time in prayer and silence... one highlight came after lunch when I was invited up to Sister Paula's Icon Studio where she has been painting Icons since 1999.

March 28, 2006

As it turns out the monks at the Abbey in Atchison did not have "room" for me, so I sent off an email to the Sisters at the Monastery. Their response.... come on up. So, yesterday I started my pilgrimage to Mount St. Scholastica for a little reading week retreat. Reading week is a Saint Paul School of Theology ritual that occurs once during the fall semester and once during the spring. I am not sure what its original purpose was... to catch up on reading and school work, to work ahead, or as a break to catch up on church work and family time...It would take me 6 weeks to catch up on my reading at this point. At any rate, I find myself with the Sisters praying and eating, and then doing some reading... mostly Buddhism so far. This is a great environment, more on that later. My host Sister has been Sr. Micaela. She has been here for 50 years. An interesting thing happened last night when I checked in... I am staying in the St. Catherine building, an early dorm of the College. When we arrived at my room, #60 I was amazed to see that I was going to be staying in the Mary Alice room. As it turns out Sr. Mary Alice, now deceased, lived in this room during her college years at Mount St. Scholastica. The amazing part is that my wife's Grandma's name is Mary Alice, and Julie comes from a long line of Sister Mary's... her mom, Sister Mary Jo, her cousin, Sister Mary Ann, and others that I cannot recall. The second providential moment came upon entering the room, where I ran head on into a painting of a one-eyed white buffalo, a mystical creature of Native American lore that I was introduced to long ago by Rev. Jeffy Lutz. Needless to say, it was no coincidence that this was to be my place of rest and retreat.