Monday, 4 October 2010

Too Long

It's been too long. Too long for many things.
First off, too long since I posted last. I don't do this communication thing well and I apologise. Life on a small, remote Scottish island is very busy and there isn't often time to sit and write, especially on a computer. Paper and pen, on a rock, by the waves, in the sun...yes. Computer and keyboard, in an office, not working, out of the sun...no.
Secondly, too long since a good chunk of time off with nothing planned and time alone. This also adds to point one. But it also adds to point three.
Thirdly, too long since a lie in, a solid nights sleep and enough time in bed to function at full capacity. My body is tired and becoming weak. My mind is tired and my knees are sore. This is not a good sign.
Isn't is good that we have a new Hospitality Team Leader arriving on Sunday? An extra pair of enthusiastic hands to hopefully take some of the work load. A smiling face around to hopefully lighten the air. A person to be interested in the well being of the staff. It will hopefully be a good change for us, to introduce a new member of the resident team at this tired and weary time of year. Especially this year. Especially this week. Everyone is stretched and now more so than normal.
Life is an odd thing and I fully believe that everything happens for a reason, but sometimes those reasons are hard to find. And at the moment that is the case, that reasons for things are hard to find. Why the hurt, upset, anger, loss, judging, criticising, blame, tears....? The list could go on. What is the reason for the whole situation, and for the individual situations surrounding it? It's fascinating to think about. Maybe I will never know the answer. Maybe I will never know what good has come of this. At the moment the good things to come out of the recent changes hasn't yet become apparent but I'm going to keep searching. The good things must be there, somewhere. Becoming closer to those you really do care for and love from the deepest part of you? Working out who your true friends, support network, family and God-given angels are? Being made to smile because of the little things and realising how important the little things are?
"Be still and know that I am God..."
"We have not time to stop and stare..."
"Close your eyes, get some sleep, it's too late now to change anything but it's alright, get some sleep. It's so dark outside so close your eyes and feel the world turn round. If you're not lost, I guess that makes you found."