Customer:*stunned* “Uh…I also work for [same firm]. Who is your husband?”

Me: “He’s in Litigation. His name is [husband’s name].”

(Suddenly, the customer’s jaw drops and all color leaves her face.)

Customer: “He’s your husband? Um…he supervises all my work.”

Me: “Does he now? Well, well, what a small world!”

Customer: “I…uh…am a temp attorney and am trying to get a permanent job at the firm. He is…wow…he’s really smart and brilliant and…um…you are so beautiful and intelligent…you make such an elegant couple!”

(A couple, about mid-30s, comes up to the counter. The man has an account, but no card or ID on him. Her name is apparently on the account, though. Asking for his name, I pull up his account. As she’s fishing in her purse for ID, I look at his account. There are two women’s names on the account.)

Me: “Ah, so you must be [first female’s first name]?”

(Suddenly, the wife fires off a hateful look at her husband.)

Wife, to husband: “I thought you took your ex-wife’s name off the account!”

Me: “Oh geez, I’m sorry. He probably just added you, not realizing her name was still on there. You must be [second female’s first name].”

(She gives me an ice cold stare.)

Wife: “NO, I’M NOT!” *storms out*

Him: “Well, guess these are for me, then.” *rents the movies and leaves, blushing redder than an apple*