Four years ago, psychologist Leonard Sax (MD, PhD) wrote a well-received book titled Boys Adrift. The doctor tried to answer the question, why have so many young males fallen into passivity and indifference?

Dr. Sax had heard more and more parents complain that their boys stayed indoors most of the time, spent hours on video games, and in general seemed to lack the confidence and esprit de corps that had characterized boys throughout history.

Something scary is happening to boys today, Sax concluded. From kindergarten to college, American boys are, on average, less resilient and less ambitious than they were a mere twenty years ago. The gender gap in college attendance and graduation rates has widened dramatically.

The books full title is, Boys Adrift: The Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men. Sax lists the five factors right on the cover: video games, teaching methods, prescription drugs, environmental toxins, devaluation of masculinity.

Its worrisome that he seems to like them all. That might be a clue that he has not solved this mystery. Indeed, lets consider the possibility that none of these theories is the deep answer we want. Lets start from scratch and consider the things we know for sure.

First of all, critics have often noted that schools seem organized more for girls than for boys. Most boys do not want to be confined to a desk; they would rather be outside playing and competing. Second, not only are boys kept passively inside, they are forced to deal almost the entire day with reading, writing, and arithmetic, probably not their own first choices.

But these factors are historically common. Boys have always been restless at their desks. They have often stared out the window and daydreamed...

Why do boys play video games instead of riding bikes in structured environments with helmets and pads? Why to they gane instead of go illegally camping in off0limits environmentally sensitive habitat? Why game rather than be arrested for a slingshot or BB gun? Why game instead of play sports where winning makes you a taunting bully?

We raised 4 through the 80’s and 90’s. They had fishing poles, rifles, tents and boats. We were outside even at 30 or 40 below in an ice house. 95% of their friends by the late 90’s were in their basements with “their own” computer and cable TV. Many of these neighbor boys were just weird. Living in an outdoor paradise and they dressed Goth and hated humanity. Their parents were exactly as you said. Pre-occupied and in my opinion selfish especially with their time.

There's a minute and a half promo at the start, but this is a long video you want to send to everyone who isn't yet convinced. This is the history of the roadmap that was created by the Fabians, the Marxists, the progressives, et al toward the destruction of America. It is on track, and has been successful beyond expectation! This is the video which explains the end of America, and what is in store. Can I say it plainer? Pass it around, if you wish. God bless.

Our local McDonalds still hire a lot of high school kids and yes, many of the boys do seem feminized (very). I can’t say if it’s just the type of boys who apply at a fast food place or not. Some want to look you right in the eye for far too long and always have a silly smile on their face (I don’t think they’re all queer, though).

The article talks about boys wanting to stay inside most of the time. Again, I don’t know about the boys, but our girls have been outside for just about every possible minute since the weather turned good (and a lot before). And no, they’re not turning into boys.

No..feminism. Boys are devalued. Not only that, but they get incredibly mixed messages from the media. Girls, on one hand are told they are awesome from morning until night.. Boys, on the other hand, are told they are pigs. But then, they put on their TV’s and radios, and they are inundated with messages filled with sex. Then, when they actually do something, they are arrested, suspended, ridiculed and mocked. I would rather be anything than a young man today.

16
posted on 05/07/2013 1:03:07 PM PDT
by Hildy
(Falling down is how you grow. Staying down is how you die.)

They’ve been told since birth not to be what they are - boys. Don’t act up. Don’t fight. Don’t be rambunctious. Don’t do this, don’t do that blah blah blah. Basically, grow up to be girls with different body parts.

And someone wonders why the end result is a generation of weak kneed passive boys?

My idiot stepdaughter toilet trained her son to urinate sitting down, mostly for her convenience in cleanup. That kid dropped out of the 9th grade, is now 21 and has never had a job to speak of. He passed his GED, but today's military prefers high school graduates and he has no interest in taking a couple college classes to enter the Navy. He is, in fact, too lazy to steal. He's good at video games and sleeping late. I may be wrong, I think the toilet training screwed him up for starters.

One of the main reason is the increase in the feminine aspect of personality of boys as a result of the increase in the masculinity of their mothers.

Young children need to bond with the mother’s feminine energy in order to stabilize their consciousness and establish a solid foundation for life. Lack of a feminine mother results in a lack of emotional bonding. The work of Mary Ainsworth and John Bowlby’s “Attachment Theory” explains this.

Why do boys play video games instead of riding bikes in structured environments with helmets and pads?

It has been a mystery to me why only girls (including ours) ride bikes around here. All the same streets are here as when I was a kid and not many of the girls wear helmets. The boys only seem to want to ride those silly scooters and skateboards later on. I just built one of my girls a banana seat wheelie bike and she thinks it's neat. The other girl has a Kawasaki dirt bike already. I can think of only one boy around here who could handle that with their lack of bike experience.

It seems that pretty much every place in the world is infected with that crap but thankfully we’re years behind Massachusetts. All I can think of is one girl about ten years ago (also at a fast food place) who talked about becoming a boy, but don’t know if she did.

My daughter had a CR80 and helped me work on trucks ;) Then F22s. Most of the guys she went to school with still smoke pounds of pot and do nothing.

I asked her a while back what the hell was wrong with them. She said “Dad, their more female than their girlfriends.” they got there because their teachers rammed PCBS down their throats and Hollywood made it cool to be GLBTXYZ.

They have nothing to look forward to a John Wayne type men but scorn and ridicule. So they withdraw into fantasy. And to be honest, I understand why. Not that it’s good right or anything like that. But I understand it.

PS the Daughter has also modeled for hair stuff,,,so she’s not butch ;)

Definitely can’t figure out what is ‘wrong’ with boys these days.
My oldest Grandson, (HS Senior) will graduate on time and has played Baseball going back to TBall.
He is NOT interested in College (I am following my Grandfathers complaint over my going in Navy by definitely NOT encouraging either one in the Military though the Sr would probably qual for one of the Acadamys) but is leaning towards a trade school. He has also held a job the last few years.
The youngest Grandson (HS Soph) also has played ball since ‘day 1’ but his mother ‘complains’ he games to much BUT his grades are up and the only real gripe I had(have) with him is I found him wearing an Obama tshirt under his Baseball Uniform shirt.
However, my ‘anger’ turned to absolute JOY JOY JOY when I noticed the shirt read
One
Big
A$$
Mistake
America
So all is ‘well’ to say the least.

The go out for the team, make the team no matter how bad, and the trophys and such for anything other than 1st place disgusts BOTH the boys + their Older sister.

That's great. I've had something like that in mind for our older girl and I do teach her mechanical work -- and like yours, she's very, very feminine -- no gender identification problems at all. She was in the Young Marines for a couple years and they did an excellent job keeping the girls, girls.

Thanks for posting this...I think. Less than 24 hours after I vowed that I was a "one and done" baseball coach (11 & 12 YOs), articles like these make me rethink my stance.

I don't belittle or bully my players, but I've been focusing on holding them accountable: getting to practice and games on time, hustling/giving their best effort, etc. My wife says I'm too impatient, yet every dad tells me to keep up the good work.

There's 2-3 weeks left in the season, so it can go either way (for next year).

42
posted on 05/07/2013 1:25:53 PM PDT
by Night Hides Not
(The Tea Party was the earthquake, and Chick Fil A the tsunami...100's of aftershocks to come.)

I’m 63. About 2/3 of the boys I grew up with broke an arm or a leg in childhood at least once. We did this by doing something stupid, daring, exciting and dangerous. Most of these guys had access to a BB gun, a pellet gun or a real .22lr rifle. Many had all three. We rode bike or walked when we wanted to go somewhere. We slept in the woods, built fires, swam in ponds, smoked cigarettes we didn’t actually enjoy and grew up to be responsible adults. I see my daughters boyfriends and am pretty sure I could kick their asses even today.

Maybe it’s estrogen in the water supply from birth control pills. Maybe it’s feminized education. Maybe I’m just an old fart who misremembers. I think I grew up with better men.

43
posted on 05/07/2013 1:27:36 PM PDT
by muir_redwoods
(Don't fire until you see the blue of their helmets)

Education is one thing, but I think the biggest obstacle is the absence of fathers. You cant learn to be a man without having a man teach you how to be one. And the father has to be around daily not periodically.

It’s not just the public schools. My son graduates next week from a small Christian high school. I don’t think any of the girls in his class have ever been on a date. The boys were not seen as potential mates, but as competition for scholarships. There is no teenage pregnancy, but there’s also really no friendship. Everything is about the girls getting jobs. And the female teachers have no concern for the boys. We paid a lot of money for him to go to a school where they can pray, but you don’t see much of “the fruit of the spirit”.

46
posted on 05/07/2013 1:30:29 PM PDT
by blueunicorn6
("A crack shot and a good dancer")

when I was growing up in the 50s; all I heard was get outside, don't hang around the house....in those days, TV was a dream, and radio was the only entertainment ....

My 2 grandsons, unable to spend 30 minutes away from the computer, and texting on a cell....but I can see that they are defeated....it is clearly a female world; women, are everywhere, I never deal with a man, at the bank, or at a store....the feminists of 60s, sat out to eradicate the male from their society, and from what I see, they are just about there....

She has no problem doing dude work or being a female. She’s a Sgt now and moved on to another field in the AF, but she did the F117 the 22 and the 35.

And she will be the first to tell you that women probably SHOULDNT be in the military. But many of the guys today are wimps. Thank God that America is big enough that we still have plenty of MEN joining and serving like MEN. But there are fewer all the time. Thanks to the feminization of boys in general. Not a popular thing to say. But facts bear it out.

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