Tiny new Kardashian addition Penelope Scotland Disick happened yesterday, the second child (after 2-year-old Mason) for Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick. The 7-lb, 3 oz. baby was delivered "all-naturally" at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center after Kourtney's brief flirtation with water birth. "Scott and I are overjoyed to welcome our precious angel Penelope Scotland Disick into our lives. We are forever blessed. Mommy and baby are resting comfortably," said Kardashian. Like Mason's birth, Penelope's was filmed and they are considering putting it on national TV. (As you are doubtlessly already aware, they are two of the stars of period ensemble drama Downton Abbey.) [E! Online]

Um! Nadya Suleman, a.k.a. Octomom, is releasing a single called "Errybody In The Club Who Exploits Themselves And Their Stable Of Children To Fulfill Their Dream Of Being A Sexy Internet Celebrity Say Yeah" "Get On The Dance Floor." She began recording after filming her solo sex tape, which she said was "liberating" and made her want to find another outlet to express herself. [TMZ]

Today in Things You Could Have Guessed If You'd Only Had The Energy To Think About Them, back in 1997 Mick Jagger developed an unreciprocated sexual obsession for Angelina Jolie. She was married to British actor Jonny Lee Miller then, but her mom Marcheline Bertrand, a Stones fan, encouraged her to lead Jagger on because "he could teach her about fame." #goodreasons. But Jolie was busy with her husband and other men and just messed with Jagger's head, leaving him "virtually sobbing" into the phone. Angie, you can't say we never tried. [news.com.au]

Some extremely sad news this morning: Usher's 11-year-old stepson Kyle Glover has been declared brain-dead after a weekend spent in critical condition in the wake of a boating accident on Friday. He and a friend were floating on inner tubes when they were struck by a Jet-Ski. Usher charted a private jet to fly Kyle's mom, his ex-wife Tameka Foster, to his side after the child suffered a blow to the head and was knocked unconscious. Despite their bitter divorce in 2009, both Foster and Usher are present at the hospital. [Bossip]

Rihanna is choosing her own choices and her friends are concerned. Having recently admitted that she's reached an emotional "breaking point," she's apparently been doing a little too much partying and having unsafe sex with some guys—her friends are concerned she'll end up "pregnant, or worse." This "insider" also intimates that she might try to get pregnant to win Chris Brown back. Typing that just gave me the icks/the terribles. With friends like these, who needs someone to leak your personal shit to tabloids for money? [OK! Magazine]

Rumer Willis is romantically involved with Jayson Blair. Unfortunately, not this Jayson Blair, but another Jayson Blair who starred on the short-lived MTV series The Hard Times of RJ Berger, a show about an unpopular kid with a very large penis. I'm not kidding. [Page Six]

Zoey 101 star Matthew Underwood pleads no contest to the marijuana and 17-year-old girl in his bedroom. [TMZ]