Couples take one last trip before launching into parenthood

Joanne Laucius, Postmedia News08.23.2011

Ottawa residents Stef Manzoni and his wife Hannah Dayan, who are expecting their first child, took a 'babymoon' to Boston this spring to relax before the baby's arrival.Bruno Schlumberger
/ Ottawa Citizen

Ottawa residents Stef Manzoni and his wife Hannah Dayan, who are expecting their first child, took a 'babymoon' to Boston this spring to relax before the baby's arrival.Bruno Schlumberger
/ Ottawa Citizen

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First comes the honeymoon. Then, sometimes, a relaxing "procreation vacation" is a necessity.

Next on the agenda is the "babymoon," one last travel hurrah before the little visitor becomes a permanent, life-changing experience.

The term was coined a few years ago, meaning a period of time for new parents to bond with their baby. But the definition of babymoon has since shifted to mean a relaxing trip for parents-to-be, usually in the second trimester of the pregnancy.

It allows the couple to de-stress and bond before the baby is born. A babymoon can range from a weekend getaway to a stay at a luxurious spa.

"You get caught up in planning for the baby, and the nursery and the classes and the nursing classes. You forget you’re still a couple. It’s a good idea to ’date’ each other," says Ottawa’s Hannah Dayan, 39, who is expecting her first baby at the end of August.

Dayan and her husband Stef Manzoni, 49, opted for the more modest option, taking a nine-hour drive to Boston and Cape Cod this spring.

They know there won’t be much of an opportunity for travel after their baby is born, says Dayan. "Just to be together and not caught up so much in the baby. It’s good for the relationship."

They also knew that the kind of travel they did as a childless couple would be curtailed — at least for a while — after the baby arrives.

The pair met through mutual friends while mountain biking in Gatineau Park. They were married in 2004 and honeymooned in Mexico. They have been mountain biking in Utah and visited friends and did more biking in Italy and Germany.

Dayan saw the term "babymoon" on a pregnancy website called thebump.com. It was included in a list of things expectant mothers should consider in every trimester of the pregnancy.

Thebump.com advises taking a babymoon in the second trimester, after the nausea of the first trimester and before travel becomes exhausting or difficult in the third trimester. (The website also suggests consulting a doctor and checking out medical facilities at the destination).

"We had been so stressed out. It was hard to get away even for a weekend. We knew that with the baby coming, it would be really, really hard to get away," says Dayan.

"It had to be a drive, and it couldn’t be more than a day’s drive," says Manzoni, who notes he didn’t even know that a pre-natal getaway was called a "babymoon" until after they returned from the trip.

Some friends had decided to babymoon in Cuba, but Dayan and Manzoni opted for Boston, which was within driving distance, and offered kosher restaurants while staying within their budget. Dayan had visited Boston before, but Manzoni had never been there.

The couple stayed at a bed and breakfast just outside the city. They walked the Freedom Trail around Boston, visited the JKF Museum and Library, where they bumped into actor Martin Sheen, took a tour in amphibious vehicle, and drove to Cape Cod for a day. They packed a lunch and enjoying a picnic on the beach which was, at the time, almost devoid of tourists.

They played it by ear, which is the way they like to travel.

"We didn’t do a lot of shopping. That wasn’t the purpose of the trip. I don’t think it should be super-fancy. It doesn’t have to be an all-inclusive," says Dayan.

"It’s the last hurrah, so it speak, before the baby comes and you have a new lifestyle."

Dayan was a mid-level mountain-biking racer. Having a newborn will bring a temporary end to mountain biking as a pair, although they plan to go road-riding with the baby in a bicycle chariot and keep up the mountain biking on a solo basis.

Around the world, resorts have picked up on the baby trend, offering spa packages for expectant couples.

The E’Terra Inn, an eco estate on the Niagara Escarpment near Tobermory, for example, has offered babymoon packages for several years.

But owner Laurie Adams says she finds guests usually just want a suite, personal times and light activities, such as trail walks or reading while enjoying the waterfront. The inn also offers a massage that is good for lymph drainage.

"We have an excellent practitioner for these massages. One has to be careful with baths and aromatherapy massages," says Adams.

Still, she will be removing the babymoon package from her list of special offerings. In the past two years, requests for the babymoon package have dwindled, although she’s not sure if the reason is economic or demographic.

Dr. Gideon Koren, a pediatrician and toxicologist, founded Motherisk at the Hospital for Sick Children. Motherisk does research and offers counselling on reproductive risks.

If a woman is healthy, there is no major issue with air travel, says Koren.

"In fact, flight attendants can continue working almost to term. If the woman has medical problems that may complicate in pregnancy then travel should be avoided unless it’s a must, while addressing her special needs."

Immunizations are another concern. In general, vaccination with live attenuated virus is not recommended in pregnancy, says Koren. If the woman travels to regions where such vaccination is needed, it should be discussed with her doctor and Motherisk.

Koren says he has never heard the term "babymoon." But, generally speaking, a vacation is a good idea for mothers-to-be, he says.

"Vacation and relaxation is a wonderful idea, if affordable. But not a medical must."

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