Buying gifts for women

Question from a guy! Is there a special trick to getting good gifts for a woman? Any particular item or store you like or wish you would get? Or perhaps a good way for picking out gifts?

For whatever reason, my gift buying has been lousy at best! My latest failure: For a woman who often has back and neck cramps I bought a massage package. After complaining about the massage for 10 minutes she says “but thanks for the nice gift” :-P. I won’t bore you with past failures but I’m getting to the point where the next woman is going to get a vacuum! At least the disappointment will be expected :-).

Pay attention to what she says, and keep track of things she says she’d like, but hasn’t bought for whatever reason. There’s no one-size-fits-all gift. If my Fi bought me jewelry it would be a waste of money, but I was thrilled when he bought me an aerogarden. He got those cues from random things I’d said in conversation (not even trying to drop hints).

Pay attention to what she already owns/uses. Updating a favorite pair of boots she is sad is starting to wear out (and ask for help picking them out from a friend) or getting jewelry that is inline with the style of jewerly she already owns is good or a new wallet (check what kind she already has and buy similar style), etc. But you have to know she likes these things so listen to what she says.

Most people say “I really wish I had….” at some point. listen for it and make a note in your phone.

If she doesnt normally go and do something (IE massage, pedicure etc) dont get it for her unless she has said she wants to do it. Some women dont do these things because they dont want to spend the money, others because they simply dont care to do them. Unless you know which category your girl falls into, skip it.

If its a newer relationship stick to safe cateegories and avoid things for the house unless specifically asked for.

Oh boy you sound like my FI! One year he got me a spice rack for Christmas (“but I remember you saying you wanted one!”). For my birthday he offered to pay for my oil change and bikini which I had already scheduled. Um… Thanks? Thankfully, he has gotten much better! He knows I like wine so for my birthday this year he put together a little wine gift set with wines and cheeses he thought I would like. It was sweet 🙂 and it really showed he thought about it!

I say you can’t go wrong sticking to their interests and personalizing things if possible! Like, if she likes to see plays then surprise her with tickets to one. For more generic gifts for people you might not know very well I think the “night out gift” (movie theater gift card + restaurant gift card) is always a winner!

I’m hard to buy for and my husband does a great job of surprising me with some really unexpected and appreciated gifts. I really think most of it has to do with really listening when someone expresses a desire for something and following up with it. Even better if you give random gifts at ‘off’ times….before or after a Holiday or birthday (when its pretty much expected)…the surprise factor can become a great memory! If you’re a thoughtful gift giver rather than the type who buys last minute because you have to and pick up whatever you see, it will be pretty obvious.

Jewelry is always appreciated, and my number one NO gift is NO appliances!

@MrBee1997: Take note of things she stops to look at when passing by shops, or things she notices that other women have and she likes. What are her interests? You could get her something that plays to her hobbies if she has any, or take her someplace that she has mentioned she’d like to go to. If she likes jewelry, you can get her a charm bracelet and give her charms that are specific to her on special occasions.

Most of the time we drop hints about what we want. Like if my DH got me flowers and something for my bike or surfboard I’d be really happy. He’s also taken me shopping before and that worked out pretty well. I got a whole new outfit that he would never be able to pick out and I got to hang out with him.

A safe bet is flowers and jewelry, I don’t know any girl who would be upset at getting those.

@Horseradish: + 1. Nothing makes me more happy than knowing my fiancé actually remembers what I told him I liked and bought it to me. But very simple things make great gifts too : offering flowers never gets old. Jewelry, I don’t know. I’d be happy for sure, but I wouldn’t personnally want him to spend that much money. But would I turn it down ? No ! Getting a ”shopping spree” with SO is also something that he already offered me and I loved it. 🙂

I differ from many Bees because I actually love to receive appliances and things for the house ! But anyone who listens to me will hear me say it at one point, that I wished I had this appliance or this tool or this thing to listen to music to, etc. 🙂

I’d say though, avoid perfume, which I believe is a bit ”too personal” (unless you know exactly which ones she wears).

@MrBee1997: I don’t see a problem with asking her, but don’t be shocked if she says she doesn’t know. I’m really bad at answering that on the spot!

If you’ve been together awhile and have some great memories, getting a gift related to those memories can be nice. (I.e., a beautiful photo of a special place). Personally, I love experiences we can do together, so DH often gets tickets for a show or an amusement park or something similar.