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Friday, February 27, 2009

Collection Agency

I am not a collector by nature and I confess I don’t really understand why people do. If it’s a collection you use often like dishes, workout gear, men then I get it, but what if it’s just stuff…cows, butterflies, stuffed animals? What purpose does it serve? What if someone decorates their whole house in it like the crazy McDonald's lady or the insane Pez guy? Do you come over and instead of letting out a horrifying gasp do you smile and compliment their taste?

Sometimes it is just one gift that starts the ball rolling. This happened to my mom with crystal. One year my dad gave her a little crystal rose and she oooh and aaaahed over it and 10 years later…crystal out the wazoo! What are we gonna get mom this year? Well she likes crystal, right? How about this crystal frog because who doesn’t need one of those? I won’t even get started on my husband’s shot glass collection and no, we do not sit around every night taking shots of tequila. This would be why we have three boxes of said shot glasses in the attic.

I’m nothing if not observant and I learned to speak up after witnessing the great crystal debacle. In the very beginning of my relationship with my hubby, I made the comment that he reminded me of Winnie the Pooh because of his name. He thought it was funny and proceeded to buy me a stuffed pooh bear, pooh watch, pooh earrings and pooh sweatshirt…all for our first Christmas together.

Now as we were in the infant stages of our relationship most people would just grin and bear it (bear as in pooh bear, get it…pun intended). As you have guessed I am not most people and I felt now would be the appropriate time to share my collector’s theory. Look, who doesn’t have love for Winnie the Pooh? But my love for pooh bear has a limit and this was it. Honesty is always the best policy in such situations, don’t you agree? What if I hadn’t been honest and 12 years later I’m still getting Winnie the Pooh? My mom and I could sit around and dust our collections and relive each holiday by discussing who gave us what.

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About Us

K and H were siamese twins separated by 6 years. We make each other laugh when our spouses won't, so we have created this blog to share the laughs. H is the Fag and K is his Hag. K is happily married to Big Red while H is living with Monkey Boy since gay marriage is still illegal in this country.