NSW Premier Promises To Make The Pokies Run On Time

NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian has promised all of the State’s residents that the upcoming train strike will have no effect on the State’s precious gambling industry.

“I assure you all that we will move heaven and earth to make sure that any resident of NSW that wants to play the pokies on January 29th will be able to play the pokies,” said the Premier. “We will be running special charter buses to and from the Casino and any resident who wishes to go to their local RSL to gamble can simply call Transport Minister Andrew Constance directly and he will give them a lift.”

When asked what the Premier would do for those who are unable to get to work or school the Premier replied: “We need to priortise and we all know that in NSW nothing comes before gambling. So to those that can’t get to work take a day off go and play the pokies or maybe some roulette.”

“For those with kids many RSL’s have childcare attached so bring the kiddies along, just don’t leave them in the car.”

NSW Opposition leader Luke Foley when reached for comment on the upcoming train strike said: “This Government needs to do more to keep the trains running. I mean people won’t be able to get to the greyhounds and that is a disgrace.”

“We need to keep greyhound racing strong. Hang on if the train tracks aren’t being used then we could race the dogs along them. Oh that’s an idea who said Luke Foley doesn’t have any policies.”