Forget logic and believe in the Chargers

San Diego Chargers running back Ryan Mathews (24) dives into the end zone for a touchdown against the Arizona Cardinals during the first half of a preseason NFL football game, Saturday, Aug. 24, 2013, in Glendale, Ariz. (AP Photo/Rick Scuteri)
— AP

San Diego Chargers running back Ryan Mathews (24) dives into the end zone for a touchdown against the Arizona Cardinals during the first half of a preseason NFL football game, Saturday, Aug. 24, 2013, in Glendale, Ariz. (AP Photo/Rick Scuteri)
/ AP

Your brain is saying that the Chargers stink, but Monday, your brain will have no say in the matter.

Logic tells you that the Bolts are bad, but come kickoff, logic will bolt.

There is something about the first game of an NFL season that causes minds to banish every shred of doubt that fans had about their teams. The Chargers may end the season as chumps, but when Monday rolls around, fans will convince themselves that they’re champs.

The thing is, if there is any league in which history encourages such blind confidence, it’s the NFL. Pro football offers a degree of unpredictability that you just won’t find in another major American sport.

Chicago Cubs fans knew that the rest of the NL Central would squish them in the standings this year, just like Detroit Pistons devotees know a similar fate awaits. But in the National Football League, you really, genuinely, have no idea.

For instance, did you know that in each of the past 10 seasons, there has been at least one NFL squad that finished last in its division one year and first the next? Were you aware that in six of the past seven seasons, a first-year head coach has taken his team to the playoffs? What about the fact that between 2002-09, seven of the eight Super Bowl runners-up failed to reach the postseason the following year?

If you saw any of that coming, you deserve your own 900 number pronto.

No Charger has experienced the seismic swings of a 16-game record quite like Ronnie Brown. The running back played for a Dolphins team that went 9-7 in 2005, 6-10 in 2006, 1-15 in 2007, and 11-5 in 2008.

No amount of roster upgrades can forecast a 10-game uptick, just like no amount of relinquished talent can predict a one-win season. But the craziest part for Brown was that, based on training camp alone — he couldn’t guess how one year would turn out any better than the next.

“That’s the hard thing about it, is that you really don’t know,” Brown said. “It’s not like basketball where you can have one or two guys that just take over the game. This is the ultimate team sport, and there are no bad teams.”

Well, there are some bad teams. And while we’re not yet sure if the Bolts are one of them, it would be tough to pass a polygraph while calling them good.

You just can't get around the fact that their pass-protection is still very suspect, that Philip Rivers has thrown 35 interceptions over the past two years, or that they rushed for an AFC-low 3.3 yards per carry last year.

You just can't deny that their secondary has new starters at three of its four base-defense positions, that their receiving corps lost Danario Alexander, and that their special teams allowed approximately 94 yards per return this preseason.

Whether it's on paper, laptop, tablet, or smartphone -- the Chargers just don't look all that great. But when fans drink that Week 1 Kool-Aid Monday night -- they'll see something else entirely.