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Busy lives, busy minds, busy days, restless nights . . . most of us can relate. We live in a big city and with that comes the feeling of being rushed, meeting deadlines, fighting traffic, standing in line, early mornings and many other things which shape our days. In the midst of it all, we know we need to take care of ourselves. We are all looking for ways to escape what we do, and be with who we are.

Ending our day on the couch is where most of us actually begin to relax before bed. We flop down and let go of the need to move or think.

The longer we lay, we notice our breathing becomes calm and the body still, but what about relaxing our minds?

Your mind fills with things to do or think about: send an e-mail, fill out a form, a conversation you had, check your bank account, make a grocery list, what to make for dinner, call your mother.

Whether you realize it or not, your mind is always going.

So, how do we train our minds to relax? It’s not an easy thing to do because your mind is used to being given full control to chatter away with every thought that creeps in.

A regular meditation practice enables us to learn how to distance ourselves from our thoughts.

It is very easy to identify with every thought that comes into our heads and to believe what we think is true. We can quickly "let our thoughts run away with us." This is what leads to obsessiveness and insecurity.

For example, when we think we have offended someone with a harmless remark, we can spend hours going over all the details of the discussion; yet, perhaps the wounded party has not given it a second thought and we have wasted our time and energy on something unproductive.

This awareness has changed so much of the way I live. I no longer dwell on things that are beyond my control. I don’t stay up worrying and losing sleep over things that can be dealt with in the morning the way I used to either.

A meditation practice has better equipped me to recognize the thoughts that can easily lead me in directions I don’t want to go. It is this realization that allows me to become more present, and productive, in my daily life.

An important first step — whether it is your first time or your 500th time — is to begin by noticing where your mind is at the present moment.

Begin by sitting comfortably, keeping your spine straight and tall, and in stillness. Let your palms rest on your thighs and close your eyes. Notice the path and sound of your breath, and let your breathing become deep, full and relaxed.

Take the time to notice what is mindlessly floating in and out of your thoughts, but without responding. If your thoughts tell you that you need to buy milk, don’t start thinking about where or when or what kind. Just let that thought go and bring your awareness back to the sound of your breath. Maybe you didn’t know you could do that, but you can; it simply requires being aware, attentive and patient.

When I first realized this was possible, it was an eye opener — and a mind opener. I sat and noticed thoughts drift in and out as an observer instead of as a participant. The effect was mind blowing.

I learned it was possible to relax the body, the mind and the breath simultaneously with energizing and calming results.

Now, looking back on my first experience meditating, I realize I completely missed the point. At the time I enjoyed sitting in a darkened room for 20 minutes and creating grocery lists and to-do lists, thinking about my kids and work. There was no shortage of things to think about. I used the time to reinforce my thoughts and give them control to run wild.

Incorporating a mantra, or specific phrase, into your sitting time will help to draw your focus on something positive. Connecting a positive thought or mantra with the movement and flow of your breath will help to further the feeling of calm and relaxation one hopes to find in meditation.

Your mantra can be as simple as connecting "I am" as you inhale, with any word as you exhale.

Just as with a yoga practice, meditation is also a practice. The more often you practice, the easier it becomes and the deeper the experience.

The bonus is that all we have is time and it doesn’t matter how old we are when we begin. With continuous practice, we will find a deeper and more personal connection within ourselves.

If you have never attempted to meditate, or realize it was once something you did and abandoned as life requirements changed for you, then there is no better time to start than today.

Click on our five-minute yoga series at namasteathome.com, and let me guide you on your meditation journey.

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