Mexador and I are looking at rings now, which is exciting and surreal, even after 12 years of dating. We’re looking together, then he’ll buy and surprise me with the proposal. I...have no idea what I’m doing. I made a Pinterest board and even visited a designer I kept gazing longingly at. But I don’t like what I love on the screen when it’s on my finger, which makes me doubly afraid to design something, because I can’t see it before buying. Also complicating is that I want a sapphire but of course most places only have pieces with diamonds in them so I can’t picture it.

I’ve liked pieces in stores, but I’m not crying and heart soaring like I’d kind of picture, which makes me wonder if I love them or if they’re just the one I like when I rule out the other options.