Monday, June 30, 2008

6:30 meet Buddy Steve. 7:30 Get flat tire on Rt 495 doing 75 in left lane. "Is it supposed to sound like that?" 7:35 put half empty donut on and Pray. 8:30 Make it to Loudon NH pretty much on Rim. Take a Look and its not pretty Hope to find gas station on way home. Say fuckit and strip of shirt and start drinking. 9:30 Go to VIP tent and start drinking Free Booze. 10:00 Go on Pit tour, They made us leave our drinks at the Tent something about No Alcohol down on the track, I wished Al Can't hang was here he could have worked it out. 10:15 Halfway down pit Road Realize thats they are all the same. I need a Beer.

What can I say I did not see another Afro Jew among the Unwashed Masses known as Nascar Fans. I looked and even asked a few People Hi are you an afro Jew? But All I got was Stares. Stares with no teeth but still stares. One even said What's an Afro Jew? OMG tried to explain it to the Mouth Breather with the #24 hat on but just Mumbled something about Gears and wandered off to watch the Lap Car practice.

I did see one other Black guy who wasn't trying to sell me tickets.I asked him if he was a MOT and he said he wasn't circumcised and offered to show me. I Politely declined and continued my search with no luck.

Lets just say that Nascar is Fan Friendly. I wish the NFL would allow their fans to bring Fully Loaded Coolers of Liquid sustenance as long as its not in Glass containers. That alone makes it awsome. Where else can a fat person walk around with no shirt and not having showered in like 5 days and feel right at home.

The Nascar race was pretty cool and Much more of an experience than you would ever think with it being so LOUD and how fast the cars drive it is pretty fucking amazing that there aren't more crashes. This race was messed up we saw 60+ laps with no crashes. I don't know about the rest of you but isn't that what makes Nascar so Special? I mean watching the first laps is pretty exciting but after that It seems to get old quick I mean 301 Laps, How many beers did we bring in? I Did find it funny that Individual Folks would stand up and Cheer or yell at a Particular driver as he went by at 200 mph. I mean dude he can't hear you or see you give it up.

So we did the only thing 2 smart folks could do. We left Halfway thru the race. Which was perfect we Beat ALL THE TRAFIC. I mean we were the only car exiting it was awsome. Felt like they made that road just for me and my Flat Spare.Good thing we left since they Called the race with 12 laps to go do to Rain which we heard on the radio. Donkeys sitting there when you could clearly see it was going to rain.

Ended up getting home about 6:30 and was promptly Questioned by wife asking if I drove home, I assured her I got rid of the DUI charge when We stopped so I could Relieve myself halfway home. All and All a great time and It is something that I recommend everyone go see. even if your not a Nascar Fan its much better live than on Memorex. To be able to walk on the track and to hear those engines all start up at once is pretty amazing.