Question

My husband's not attracted to me now that I'm pregnant. What can I do?

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I'm six months pregnant and my husband never wants to make love anymore. He says he's afraid it'll hurt the baby, but I think he's just not attracted to me right now. I've tried to reassure him that the baby is safe but that doesn't help, and I'm tired of begging for sex. What can I do? And will he want me again after our baby's born?

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Candy- I know exactly how you feel! So much that your comment made me cry. In the last few months the very few times we have had sex we've had to watch dirty movies. We just celebrated our 3 year wedding anniversary and we had to rent a movie to help get him in the mood cuz he was tired. I would have rather made love, ya know. Every night he's too tired. About a week ago i woke up in the middle of the night to find that he wasnt there. the tv was on in the other room and i got up and he was pleasing himself. I was so upset. he's always so tired but he can get up and do that! I figured he did it most nights but he says he doesnt. I dont really believe him. Its really hard to deal with and not let it bother you. How do we get through this? Why cant they just see us for who we are?

Ya know I am happy to see Im not the only one. But I still wanna feel loved and attractive. When I try and talk to him about anything he just sits there and watches tv or plays video games. He thinks he pays attention to me but i get very depressed cuz im not satisfied with anything. He doesnt make sure im comfortable, he makes me run to the store for him (hes gone for me once, and im 29 weeks) we never have sex, when i cry he ignores me. He says he cant take me being pregnant anymore cuz he'll go insane. But I feel like im gonna, it feels like im alone. He doesnt understand anything! And i know its not just me cuz everyone notices what an ass he is, even his family. Nobody likes it but nobody says anything to him either besides me and then its "im sick of you bitchin at me" but im just trying to talk ya know?!? Im ready to give up.

It is frustrating, but it won't last forever. Pregnancy messes with the dads-to-be just as much as it messes with us. He may honestly not want to have sex b/c of the baby being in there, not b/c he is afraid of hurting it. He may also not be able to look at you sexually right now. It may make him feel ashamed to look at your pregnant body and think about ravaging you, lol. Some men feel like you are a mother right now, so you can't be his lover as well. If that is the way he feels, don't take it to mean that he thinks you are unattractive. My hubby and I went through this, and after the baby was born, things went back to normal. Some men feel that they don't want to touch you in that way b/c your body is not just yours right now, you know? Just ask him, and if he doesn't want to have sex, don't push him, b/c you wouldn't want him to do the same. Just tell him that if he can't get past it and doesn't want to have sex right now, that he needs to be sure to touch you affectionately as much as possible, to make sure that you still feel loved and beautiful. It may take a while after the baby gets here, but he will get over it, TRUST ME, LOL.

This comment is for "Alone" your story really tore at my heart. I cant imagine what you can be going through having him push you away when you are trying to show him how much you love him and care for him. In the past I have been told by my boyfriend that no one would be attracted to me because I am pregnant and when he is mad at me one of his favorite come backs is "shut up and loose weight". There is no need for any one to be that rude to their loved ones. I really hope that things work out for you and your boyfriend but you need to know that a lot of men out there find pregnant women very sexy. I've had to learn the hard way but NEVER let a man talk down to you and try to bring you down no matter how much you love him and care for him you need to stand up to him and stand up for yourself. Much love

My fiance used to always have some comment on how pretty i was or walk by and give me an intamate tap on the behind and comment on how much he liked the way that i looked. In the first part of my pregnancy (before i got my belly) he would still do it and he still was always interested in having sex as often as possible. Once the belly started showing it was very uncomfortable for me to find a good position where i could enjoy it as much as he did. He understood this and tried to work with me. I am now in my 8th month and when we go into public i catch him looking at all the skinny girls and he makes comments about how nice they look which would be okay if he still said that i was attractive but he never says anything but how I need to look again after I have the baby. He also has resorted to watching XXX movies and surfing those sights on the web. It makes me feel like i am not good enough any more and like i am ugly because i have the pregnant belly and have gained some weight, and of course the dreaded stretch marks. I just want him to look at me the way he used to. I thought men were suppost to find their mates the sexiest when they were carrying their child.

I'm 13 weeks pregnant now and my boyfriend said to me that no guy is going to look at me cause looking at me is a total turn off. I don't think I look fat and I haven't gain any weight yet. But I notice that after him saying this I try touching him and he just push me away. He is not supporting me through this pregnancy and it is really hard for me to get through this. I am always upset and start weeping and he calls me a cry baby. He doesn't want to go to the doctor with me or even have anything to do with me. I don't know what to do. I feel so lonely.

What a relief to read so many other women are going through the same thing! I'm 31weeks and have'nt had sex in about three weeks because the baby's movement during sex is weirding my husband out! So I'm just waiting patiently by til he gets so horny he'll have to cave.(I have'nt decided yet if I'm going to tease him a little first and play hard to get when the time comes)Until than I find pleasure in my little box of "tricks" under the bed!

Im 5 months pregnant, and my boyfriend wants sex all the time and I dont. I honestly would rather eat food every hour on the hour than have sex. Ive tried so many times, and I just can never get myself in the mood. For one, it starts to hurt and he thinks im just trying to get out of the sex. I dont want to take any chances. This is my first child and I want my baby to be healthy and no problems.

I'm six months pregnant and my situation is just like the rest of you! My boyfreind and I have always been extreamly sexual but about my fourth month (incidently when I started to get noticably heavier) he hasn't been "feeling up to it" and when he does it's short and to the point. He doesn't look at me the same and forget about foreplay. He is still cuddly and he tells me I'm beautiful all the time but I can't help but think he just isn't attracted to me anymore. We've talked about it and he says that's not true, he is just thinking about to many things right now. That's funny, I thought guys thought of sex more than anything else! Sometimes I think he is thinking of other girls or wishes I looked like I use to. I get nervous when him and the "guys" go out, aspecialy since they are all single. I sure hope all this changes after I have the baby. But then will I "feel up to it?" DUDE! I'm sick of this!!!

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