Can you take away the pain but leave the swelling?

He warmed me up on the bike and then we did drop sets on the leg press machine all the way down from 200kg to 60kg in increments of 5kg.

Wikipedia: In bodybuilding and weight training, using drop sets is a technique for continuing an exercise with a lower weight once muscle failure has been achieved at a higher weight.

That's right twenty eight sets taken to failure on the leg press, and this - mind you - is the scary plate loaded press machine where the weight bears down on you, not the more effete model where you select a weight and push yourself away.

I thought I was going to die. I couldn't even get off the bench for a few minutes once we'd finished.

After that he warmed me down on the bike and then stretched me out; I lay down and he bent my knees back in turn until my heels met my buttocks. It's good for you apparently. I was too weary to argue.

Taking my tracksuit bottoms off in the changing room after I couldn't raise my leg so I had to do that strange dance where you roll your trousers down and then march on the spot and push your pants off with your feet.