Monday, January 12, 2009

Its a New Year!

Happy 2009! This is going to be a GREAT year. My apologies for being a bit distant for awhile. It is because I have been very busy and important - I have been too wrapped up in my blisteringly hot social life and getting called away last minute for very important events such as the Golden Globes last night (OMG did anyone else think Drew Barrymore looked like a total tranny???).

I digress. In actuality I have been a little MIA because, well, I have been boring myself these days. Although 2009 has been a wonderful year so far for friendship, career, and all that jazz, ( oh yeah, and my birthday on January 7th! yay!) it has been a little slooooooow in the romance department. More than slow, more like my ability to do long division: non-existent. This may explain all the weird dreams I have been having. Elaine* bought a "Dream Dictionary" so I have been looking up the significance of all my dreams. Broken teeth, floods, birdhouses, cookie cake (actually that was not in the dictionary but I pretty much defined that for myself by the fact I ate an entire cookie cake on my birthday). For some reason Elaine and I have yet to determine why the significance of dreaming about sex is not in the dictionary. Definitely a pity because I really needed to look that one up. I tried to google "significance of sex dreams" at work and all the websites were blocked by IT. Dammit. Not only am I having unexplained, sexually frustrated dreams, but now I am going to get in trouble for looking up porn at work.

I explained my dry spell to a friend a few years older at work. She laughed and said it could be worse: apparently her mother told her she should adopt a child since it looked like she wasn't getting married. This same friend said she might have a cute fireman she could set me up with. Nice, I like a man in uniform.

Regardless, I am now back in the game. Something has to happen soon because I have to be honest I have given serious thought to making an "emergency" call to my ex. Its wrong, I know, I know. Looks like I will need to put in a 911 to a fireman instead!

First Date Followers

About Me

Hi. Welcome to my lifestyle blog. I write and comment on the hilarity that is dating, and may also include occasional cute pictures of puppies and links to food porn. I started this adventure in 2008, took a little break, and now I'm back.

Encyclopedia of FirstDate Terms/Phrases

"Lets Get Out of Here": Code speak for 'lets go to a different location where I can hopefully progress from first to at least third base.' Note - this does not mean 'Lets get some ice cream.'

Pseudo Crush: a crush that is either unattainable, embarassing or that has simply not progressed past the point of facebook stalking or an accidental drunken text message. It is possible, and acceptable, to have many pseudo crushes at the same time.