Recent sexual assaults at fraternity houses near the University of Minnesota have focused attention on alcohol and parties near campus. Today’s Question: What can be done to make college communities safer for women?

How about teaching our young women how to behave? Stop perpetuating the antiquated ideal of women being needy-books like Twilight and shows like Gossip Girl have set young women up to believe that they need men to be fulfilled.

And what about teaching young men about what is acceptable behavior? I put these assaults on the teachings of their parents. Education in the home on basic social skills was obviously not present with any parties involved, for them to have been in a situation where a sexual assault could take place. Common sense has obviously been put to the wayside, and it seems to be a common occurrence with people in this age group.

Education and fostering strong feelings of self-worth would be key to resolving this situation.

Dianne

We need to address the drinking among young people. Having lived in the U area for many years, I saw people who drank all weekend long.

Aaron

The entire focus of the U’s environment needs to be redirected toward academics. When an academic institution allows a self-destructive set of behaviors to become the norm, things like sexual assaults will happen. The change needs to start with enabling- and even mandating- that faculty form mentor relationships with students, and that students become actively engaged in their own educations. To say that these kids are in college now and must act completely independently as adults is passing the buck. The most successful companies encourage one-on-one mentorships even for their matured adults. Focusing the effort of the students and staff will create a healthy institutional environment and things like binge drinking and sexual assaults will drop naturally. I would go as far as to say that the sexual assault rate of a student body is inversely proportional to its graduation rate. Unfortunately the most we will see coming out of this is a half hearted “program” consistiong of something like urinal wall advertisements.

Steve the Cynic

We need to do a better job of raising boys to be men rather than grown-up boys. Instead of teaching young boys to be responsible members of the human community, we’ve been holding before them the ideal the ambitious, self-centerd go-getter. Why then does it surprise us when they treat a woman as just another thing to be used for their enjoyment and go get ‘er?

Bill Gleason

To point out the obvious-

Alcohol has a lot to do with this. And please note: I am not saying that women who have had a little too much deserve to be assaulted.

Perhaps the hypocritical University of Minnesota administration – the one that didn’t want beer in the stadium to save the children – could mount a real campaign to address this problem?

And yes, I realize that there are many other things that need to be done. Unfortunately, this is a problem at the U that is not just limited to fraternities.

Shannon Mcconnell

As a female and a senior in college, I believe that you should be looking for answers from the community that has first hand experience with these types of assaults, college students. As someone who has had close friends assaulted at college parties I can tell you that while alcohol is a contributing factor it is not the underlying cause. We need to focus on raising girls to have more self respect and higher self esteem so that they feel more empowered to take control of themselves when they are put in compromising situations. Avoiding conversations about sex and the choices young people need to make prevents meaningful discussion and forethought into decisions a young woman or man will be forced to make once they leave home.

If anything, the fact that these girls came out and reported what happened to them instead of being embarrassed and trying to resolve it privately, as many do, is already a step in the right direction. The U of M needs to provide education and information that targets both men and women spreading idea the idea that only sober consent is consent. The university I attend has an awesome and effective women’s organization that does great things to empower women and teach them the skills they need to have to take control over their own body. The plan workshops and classes that discuss the issues of sex and sexuality in a way that is attractive and so that student can relate to what facilitators are saying. It is only when communities start treating college students as the men and women they are and not as children running wild with new freedom that students will start to pay attention and change their behaviors.

Matt A

I’m in favor of just shooting sexual predators on the spot.

Kim

It has to start long before college. Parents need to teach their boys to be gentlemen.

“No” means NO no matter how the young woman is dressed or how much she has had to drink. The fraternities already stress this as part of their risk management programs. I commend the IFC for taking responsibility and issuing a moratorium on alcohol at parties where there are guests. That shows that most of the greek men at the University are just that, gentlemen.

Jennifer

When I was in college, most of the sexual assault prevention training was aimed at telling women how they should behave (i.e. don’t go out alone, don’t accept drinks from someone you don’t know well, don’t drink too much, etc). I would really like to see a shift in the training that targets both women and men, rather than putting the responsibility solely on the possible victim. While what we tell women is important, it is just important to teach men that women don’t really want it even though they say no, someone who isn’t fully conscious cannot consent regardless of how well you know them, and so on. Prevention training really needs to include the whole community: possible victims, possible assailants, and the people who may see something & have the chance to intervene before an assault occurs. Until we’re doing that, we’re only looking at a small part of the issue.

Alison

Binge drinking is clearly the biggest factor. The men lose control of their judgement. The women lose control of their ability to portect themselves. Developing healthy attititudes towards drinking is essential. If college is the first time students are hearing about it it’s already too late. These conversations need to begin at home well before college.

Philip

Don’t go to a frat house. I don’t want to sound like I’m being insensitive to these victims, but they need to avoid a bad situation. Is it really such a shock to hear of this sort of behavior from a bunch of drunken young men? Stay away from these situations, don’t get drunk and take care of yourself.

Hazel Stone

We need to stop blaming the young women for the crime of being female in public. Young men and women go to parties and drink. But for some reason the women get called out for their drinking if they get assaulted, but the men doing the crimes don’t.

To stop rape, stop rapists.

JEB

Oh my, how to begin on this one. I think I’ll start with college boys need to start acting like college men, and college girls need to act like college women. My husband has a degree in criminal justice, and one of the things he was taught was that men need to control their actions with the opposite sex. All a woman needs to say is that she said no, and he’s in trouble. If he gets her pregnant, he’s on the hook for 18+ years. So, he’s risking a criminal record or indentured servitude to his unplanned progeny for 2 decades because he acted like a self centered little boy.

Women, I’m sorry, but you need to protect yourself and your girlfriends. I teach a women’s self defense course, and prevention

does work with a little brains and willpower. Realize your limit on alcohol, that rufees are out there, and don’t enjoy anything so much that it will limit your ability to say no or get out of there. Work out escape plans with girlfriends (we call it the “what if” game in my course). Sometimes protecting yourself means acting like a self assured lady, and not like a drunk college girl. Do ya think those photos of you making an idiot of yourself look great on facey-space? Yeah, all they do is create a target on your back for assaults and a giant X on you for prospective employers when you want to join the workplace. After all, that is the main goal of college, right?

Part of this early adulthood training is the responsibility of the parents, but we do have to realize that most college freshmen have an “adjustment period” as they leave the nest for the first time. So having a faculty mentor and school sponsored, dry, events are needed too. A few years ago, when I was in college, it was common for cash bar school functions to end with someone being taken away in an ambulance for alcohol poisoning.

Finally, realize that, short of lobotomies, it is impossible to prevent every assault. People are their own beings and will still make stupid choices. For this, I find an open palm heel strike, elbow strike, knee strike combination to be an effective solution for college women.

EAL

It is perhaps important to recognize that at our core, we humans are animals and what drives men is different that what drives women. This is particularly true during those hormonally imbalanced years of teens and 20’s. Women need to recognize that when men drink or they are around men who drink the potential for bad things can occur and take appropriate steps to ensure their safety (e.g. no-drinking alcohol, buddy with another individual or do not attend). The first law of the survival is self-preservation.

Personal responsibility aids are don’t go anywhere alone, and probably not with just one girlfriend either. Three-four, five women from one dorm or home works better. Limit the amount one drinks is another tip that is frequently ignored by college women. And getting home at a reasonable hour helps too. There’s a reason why most crime occurs at night, often really late, when few people are around. Walking at night is practically a no-no. Biking if you don’t have a car is perhaps the way to go.

Jennie

It’s all about respect, folks: respect for yourself and respect for others. If we can teach boys to respect other people (their bodies, their voices, their choices) and to respect and value themselves (their bodies, their voices, their choices), then we will be growing young men. If we can teach women to respect and value themselves (their bodies, their voices, their choices) and other people, we will be growing young women. This can’t start in college, it has to start in kindergarten.

That said, there is absolutely no circumstance or exception or situation that excuses an assault of any kind. Back when I was in college, we used to make jokes about the super-PC “Asking of permission” honor code: “Can I kiss you? Can I touch you here? Can I touch you here?” But really, it works. If you are not capable of asking or answering those questions, then you should not be intimately touching or being touched. If you follow that code, and both parties are honest, it’s really impossible to make a mistake.

If you chose to not ask the question, or to ignore the answer, you must be held legally and ethically accountable for your actions, and the punishment must be real (like, you have to leave school for the rest of the term, and repeat all your classes if you want to receive credit, or something equally socially, financially, and academically painful.)

Joanna

It’s not enough to warn young women not to drink, not to go out at night, not to go to frat parties. The majority of rapes do not occur at drunken parties. This is only the tip of the iceberg, folks, not the whole problem. Don’t assume you know what is best until you have educated yourself.

Their mission is to “recognize and reduce sexual assault, relationship violence, and stalking on campus and to create an atmosphere where all members of the community can learn, work, and live to their full potential.”

To that end, they have excellent programs of victim assistance and education for men and women. In particular, they have initiatives for men to get involved. why is this so important? Peer pressure is a huge factor in condoning a climate that treats sexual abuse as “fun” or “normal” and it is also huge factor in discouraging that climate.

Things men can do:

Recognize that sexual violence is MEN’s issue, not just a women’s issue.

Men, don’t remain silent when you see abuse of any kind.

Refrain from victim-blaming.

Educate yourself. Check your own attitudes. Have the courage to listen to what women tell you rather than react defensively. Be role model and mentor for other boys and men, and an ally for women.

Barbara

What is a fraternity? I thought it represented a brotherhood and brothers are supposed to watch out for one another, keep each other in check. And on a campus of higher learning, well, what are they learning? Alcohol did not assault these women, men did and obviously the mob mentality rules as it does in cases of hazing. Any true gentlemen associated with these organizations would certainly resign rather than keep company with these optional brothers.

Jessica

To me, the answer is that colleges and universities should REQUIRE one introductory women’s studies class or voilence against women class for EVERY student the first year they come to that institution.

Enlightenment about how this sort of violence from abusers impacts the victims and our society would go a long way.

Kevin VC

Well a couple things for sure, and I am surprise these have not been done.

1. Campus police reports are tied directly into city and state police systems and are on file for statistics there.

2. Better visibility around campus’s.

3. Sorority and Frat Houses having random inspections. Gone are the day it was a old boys network from Animal House.

4. Parents must watch 4-5 episodes at least of Campus PD to get idea why they need to be mindful. Seriously, its not good. And whats worse is seeing the kids still doing the crap.

___

Having taken classes at the University of Minnesota I can say the maze like layout of the buildings and odd angles one turns does not help.

I recall one area where a domed mirror took forever to get permission to place, that was until POLICE (not campus) had reported increased assaults at the corner. That mirror gave warning if someone was waiting around the corner.

In general being aware of their settings is a must.

There are lots of cases where people are drunk at parties, rape charges are applied. Being not in the best state of mind… its not a good combo.

Some of these rich kids waste too much money on beer and get into trouble because of it.

I think there was not a night you did not hear of a party somewhere on campus almost every night somewhere…

What happened to studying? How about giving your beer money to financial aid kids and help them out instead…

Kevin VC

More thoughts…

After reading that the UofMN is looking for more funding, something they ask every year, and yet their funding has been flat or worse….

Anything they plan on doing to make things safer will have to take money from somewhere…

Knowing Tom Emmer downsizing or trying to close government, I would say NOT to elect him….

There will be a snow ball’s chance in heck to fund ANYTHING much less programs, incentives or even equipment to make things safer….