When did sleep become such a rare commodity? When I got old I suppose!
I remember the days I could sleep until noon. Saturday nights at a night club, Sunday mornings in bed, woken up by the smell of mum’s Sunday roast cooking in the oven. Those were the days.
Now, if I’m lucky enough to get to sleep within an hour of going to bed. I’m awake at 4:00 AM and gremlins crawl into my brain. They wake up my stress areas and make me think about things I don’t want to.

Life was much better when I could sleep!

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I’m sure my schedule is much the same as yours. On weekdays I rise and shine at 5:30 and work out. Then do a few chores before setting off to work for eight o clock.
On the way home from work I run errands, then maybe a few more chores when I get home. An evening walk is usually on the schedule too. At around 7:30 or 8:00 pm (if I’m lucky). I sit down and relax.

Saturday and Sunday aren’t much better. Why do we do this to ourselves? Today I woke up and mentally listed what I needed to do. Immediately I became stressed.

So instead, I made myself some coffee and asked myself how I’d like to spend the day! These are the answer’s I came up with.
I’d like to:
Work on my current short story (The Engineer)
Make some cookies
Meet my daughter for Happy Hour
Have another cup of coffee and…relax.

I believe someone much more important than me decreed Sunday be a day of rest.

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Why do I find it so difficult to relax? My brain doesn’t switch off. I worry about dinner at Christmas (six months ahead). I worry about shopping and buying furniture during my next trip to Italy (three months ahead). I worry about what I said last week to my boss (can’t change it now).

Does this happen to everyone? Anyone got a solution?

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You must all have noticed how great you feel when you wake up after a really good night’s sleep. As slumber drifts from your body and mind, you feel good, ready to handle anything the day throws at you. You’re rested and in control.

So why is sleep so elusive? This past week has been awful! Much too stressful, long hours at work, followed by coming home and worrying if I’d got everything done. Each night after going to bed, I’d remember something important I’d missed. That paid to my sleep.

Last night was the first night in almost a week that I slept long and hard, and woke up feeling refreshed. If only I felt like this every day. I think my massage and reflexology helped, but that’s a luxury I can only occasionally afford. How do I manage to sleep on a regular basis? I sleep well on vacation, because there’s nothing to worry about.

Coming out of Costco tonight the voices in my head just ran riot…….“oh thank heavens it’s stopped raining. My god, does that woman know she’s too old to expose that much of her bosom, and you really shouldn’t wear short skirts at THAT age. Great, someones’ parked next to me. If I have a door ding I’ll be upset!”

SHUT UP SHUT UP, I pleaded, but the voices continued.

“Do I need more wine? No, I have enough. What am I cooking this weekend? Hey watch where you’re going. Dammed Hyundai’s they’re taking over.”

“Oh, what a lovely Porsche, I bet that can shift. I wonder who’s it is. Probably some hot young man.”

I was aware of someone standing in front of me and looked up to see a gentleman smiling at me. He was about the same age as me (okay, I’ll tell you mid fifties) and quite well put together.

“I’m not a young man, but I still consider myself a pretty warm, not steaming hot, but certainly not cold.”

Was he reading my mind, I was speechless. I stood and gawked at him.

He laughed out loud now. “I guess you live alone,” he said, “and yes you were talking out loud.”

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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Today was trying (to put it mildly). By the time I got home I was ready to crash, but I valiantly baked and did few chores in preparation for visitors, but then I poured a glass of wine and sat on the porch. Thunder and lightening rumbled, rain fell, but the view was awesome!

Yes, this was a slightly better day, but how did it look on the scales?

I got up on Tuesday morning, took a deep breath, and stepped onto the dreaded contraption.

At last, I lost some weight, three pounds to be exact. Just enough to give me a boost and the will to continue.

I did well on day four, eating small portions of vegetables and protein.

On Tuesday night I went to my weekly Turbo Kickboxing class and worked my little heart out. It made me feel good. After kickboxing I was too tired to prepare a meal, so I had a bowl of cereal for dinner, not perfect but it hit the spot.

I weighed on Wednesday morning and the three pounds had stayed off, so I was content. Why is dieting so hard?

My day at work today was straight from h*#@. It started badly and deteriorated. I should have been at a ‘body pump’ class tonight, but couldn’t get away from work in time.

By the time I left work the only thing in my head was wine. My friend and I stopped at a bar instead and had a glass of Chardonnay (well actually two). Wine always means nibbles so we ordered some pita chips and artichoke dip. OOps I forgot I was on a diet. Now I have to weigh in tomorrow again. Wish me luck!