Do you guys have any good, funny, life changing/ inspiring quotes that you remember easily? I mean, like "Don't eat yellow snow", "Don't kick a cow pie on a warm day", or "Drink upstream from the herd". One of my personal favorites is "I just hate stupid people"-- Bill Engvall.

I'm not sure where I heard this one, but another top 5 one for me is "I'm a very responsible guy, whenever anything goes wrong, I'm responsible." I use that one on average of twice per day. I need some newer, better quotes.