MOVIE REVIEW: Nuns with bad habits fill 'The Little Hours'

Friday

Jul 7, 2017 at 6:30 AM

Set in Tuscany, circa 1347, the story revolves around the very unholy behavior of three nuns (Aubrey Plaza, Alison Brie, Kate Micucci); their wanton mother superior (Molly Shannon); and the wine-swilling abbot (John C. Reilly).

By Al Alexander/For The Patriot Ledger

Simply put, “The Little Hours” is pretty much Nunsense that makes no sense. It’s also not likely to garner favor at the Vatican, as Jeff Baena’s loosy-goosy adaptation of Giovanni Boccaccio’s 14th-century collection of short stories, “The Decameron,” captures the clergy with its pants down and habits doffed. The nudity is rampant, the trysts frequent and the F-bomb is uttered so often it would make Tarantino blush.

Is this any way to run a convent? Baena and his stellar cast of comedians seem to think so, as they throw caution – and their clothes – to the wind in a sex farce that knows no limits to its blasphemy. Set in Tuscany, circa 1347, the story revolves around the very unholy behavior of three nuns (Aubrey Plaza, Alison Brie, Kate Micucci); their wanton mother superior (Molly Shannon); and the wine-swilling abbot (John C. Reilly). All of them disobey their vows with impunity, lying down with men, women and witches. Good for them. But why should we care, let alone laugh at their various indiscretions? There’s no story to speak of, just a series of thinly drawn sketches meant to shock with their ribald mindset and expletive-laden anachronisms. The three nuns talk and act like 21st-century teenagers full of sass and vitriol. They see the hypocrisy of the Church and take glee in mocking it with their randy behavior. If you dare say hello, they will retort with a barrage of F-bombs, most of them directed at the convent’s groundskeeper, who they send fleeing in a snit. Then in walks Dave Franco’s Massetto, a refugee from a neighboring manor and its royally ticked off lord (Nick Offerman) who wants the lad’s head after catching him fornicating with milady of the house.

With the help of Reilly’s Father Thomasso, Massetto takes up residence and establishes a new identity as the convent’s “deaf-mute” servant. And if you look as hunky as Dave Franco, you can guess how the horny nuns respond to his arrival. What ensues is something akin to “The Beguiled” meets “Monty Python and the Holy Grail,” only not as funny. In fact, most of the genuine laughs don’t arrive until around an hour in, when Fred Armisen shows up as the order-restoring archbishop. He’s hilarious in the film’s best scene, a tribunal where he stands in judgment of the nuns, mother superior and Father Thomasso, as he reads laundry lists of charges leveled against them. Infractions range from being hopped up on belladonna to being a Jew pretending to be a Catholic. There’s also something about one of them practicing sorcery during a sacrifice of Massetto, who is tied to an altar with an orgy of stark-naked witches dancing around him.

I guess you had to be there. Trust me, though; it’s funny. The rest, not so much, although the performances (including Jemima Kirke from “Girls” and Paul Reiser) are sublime, top to bare bottom. They keep you watching long after you’ve sworn off their odious brand of religion. You admire them, too; especially the women, who use the movie as a forum on how many faiths reduce females to second-class citizens. Here, they are empowered and emboldened – and it’s an uplifting trip.

But how much more involving might it have been if Baena provided them a coherent story with honest-to-goodness character arcs? We’ll never know, but even with its shortcomings, “The Little Hours” is still better than 80 percent of the junk passing itself off as entertainment this summer. And at a scant 85 minutes, it’s a cheesy, breezy way to indulge in a little sacrilege without need of repentance. THE LITTLE HOURS (R for graphic nudity, sexual content and language.) Cast includes Alison Brie, Aubrey Plaza, Kate Micucci, Dave Franco, Molly Shannon, John C. Reilly and Fred Armisen. Grade: B-.