Tag: intuitive

My wife has an aunt who is a Shaman/Spiritual Teacher/Reiki Master Healer and a ton of other stuff, and she has been guiding me and teaching me and was able to do my attunement. Part of getting attuned is practicing reiki healing on yourself for a few days/weeks/months, and seeing how the movement of the energy helps clear all of the blockages, because blockages usually equate to all types of craziness in your life. It’s been really strange neat!

So energy work, right? Weird shit! If I’m being honest, up until last year I would have called this all, “Hocus Pocus Dopey Hippie Shit” (official categorization, in case you were wondering) , but since I’ve started this work, CLEARLY, I’ve had a change of perspective. Healing hands aren’t so far fetched any more, especially since I have seen with my own eyes and experienced in person how people are healed just by laying hands on them. Technically, I’m not supposed to heal anyone YET (until my second attunement which is scheduled for a month from Saturday! WOO HOO!!!) but my wife’s aunt said it would be okay to heal my kids and such, but NOT my wife, which NOW I understand why.

When you become a Reiki healer, there is this beautiful connection to the Universe, to Source, to the energy around you. The Reiki Master that attunes you has somehow manipulated YOUR energy and unlocked the “Universal Life Force Energy” within you, and connects you to the energy that flows EVERYWHERE through EVERYTHING in our Universe. Basically, she connected my energy to the energy of EVERY THING in the my world both visible and not.

I was sitting on the Reiki table (similar to a massage table) and she had me visualize a beautiful, powerful, healing white light coming in through the crown of my head. She moved her hands around in a rhythmic way, back and forth, up and down, sometimes shaking, sometimes eyes glossed over, not mumbling but moving her lips, and asked me to close my eyes after about 5 minutes of this. First she put her hands on the top of my head, second she cupped my ears, then covered my eyes with her hands, ask my Higher Power to sort of do their thing (can’t remember exact words, but that’s the gist), and then clapped her hands really loud! Startled me, if I’m being honest!

Next, she asked me to open my eyes and put my hands out in front of me, palms up. She used her finger to trace some lines and designs (what I now understand are Reiki “keys/symbols” that help heal and unlock) and next thing I know, my hands are buzzing with electricity. They get burning hot like I have never experienced before. I’m shown the exact way to begin healing myself, moving the energy from the crown of the head, my throat, shoulders and heart, and continues all the way down to the feet and send the energy into the ground for just that! Grounding! My hands buzz and tingle like crazy when there is an area that needs a little extra help. As I start to visualize breathing in white healing light and breathing out white healing light, I start to feel my hands tingle and heat up and it was unlike anything I had ever felt before.

As my hands hovered over the different chakras (energy centers in the spiritual body) I could feel the energy, physically, in my hands. I don’t really have the words to describe it, but it’s pretty freaking wild! AND, as I started practicing more, and developing more, I started to intuitively know what was going on and how to heal it (what color to think of, what was causing the issue). A lot of people don’t realize how energy and the chakras work. Just to give the abridged version, let’s take someone who has chronic throat issues like strep, or laryngitis (chronic being the key word here). I can almost guarantee that their throat chakra is outta whack. I can also almost guarantee that a)they have a secret they can’t share and probably haven’t been able to for quite some time b)they have an issue with lying or exaggerating or c)they never speak up for themselves although it is likely that they MUST pretty much daily, so like someone in an emotionally abusive relationship. All of that stuff, those thoughts, carry energy. When that energy is stifled, or is stuck, it doesn’t move creating blockages in the spiritual body, and then end up manifesting in the physical body. I mean, yeah, if you believe all of that. But we should, because you know, science and physics and energy and all that.

Needless to say, it has worked for me. The more and more I practice, the more and more I can clearly hear Spirit tell me what it is that is causing these things. Even more recently, while at my meditation/healing and Reiki circle group, I’ve been able to pinpoint where people’s ailments are just by focusing on their energy centers. One person sits in a chair in the middle of the room, all the Reiki healers just sorta sit around them and send them healing and help move some of the stagnated energy. I’ve seen people come in limping and leave with tears in their eyes at the pain being finally gone.

As for me, I’ve been able to really get down to what is causing some of the “stuckness” in my life right now. I’ve been able to really “hear” what the chronic things are in my life that I have to let go of in order to stop feeling some of these ailments. Soooo, I’m working on that. I’m working on getting myself together. In healing my spiritual body in order to really get my physical body in order, and hopefully, once I’m done with my Reiki II attunement in a month (learning how to heal others emotionally and not just physically and also learning distance healing [me here in NY, you there wherever you are!]) and I can go away to sunny Mexico for my Master Reiki . Sure my wife will LOVE that! LOL!

Reiki, you sure are starting to change everything….seriously, everything!

A few months ago, I posted a vision I had about rainy weather in London. I think I may have gotten it wrong because I was connecting the previous vision on 12/26/16 to this one. I’m certain, had this happened in the more recent past, I would have been more inclined (and comfortable and less fearful) to talk to the “The Team” and ask more questions like I do now.

I realized that this was the same scene I witnessed, directly in front of the palace, just as I saw it. The thing that gave it away and made it connect and resonate with me even MORE was the rain. In my vision, there was a focus on the rain, how it sat on the window of the cab, how it pooled in the gutters on the road, how the taxi tires splashed it up. It was very specific, and now, it almost feels like they are saying, “The rain would make you see!”…and so it has……

This unfinished, misunderstood prediction has happened….Praying for all of the people of England and the World….

Love and Light,Sammie ❤

Vision 12/28/2016 – During meditation last night I saw the following which leads me too believe that the previous vision I had are connected.

I was in a black and yellow checkered cab. It was raining outside. There were people outside with jackets and hats on holding black umbrellas. To my left I saw a red telephone booth that gave me the impression that I was in London. The cab made a right hand turn and in front of me was Buckingham Palace.

My gut tells me these are connected, and the weather and the attire made it feel like it would be this winter. I’ll continue to ask Spirit for whatever meanings they are trying to give me. I’m sure I’ll get more info soon…

I’ve started this post several times and have found 4 unfinished copies in my “Drafts” folder, and somehow, even now, I’m struggling to get the words down in “ink”, because there is still this huge fear of judgment or of getting called crazy, but I think I’ve had plenty of validation in the past few weeks to really start talking about some of these things that have been occurring…

The past couple of weeks have been very interesting for me since I’ve been taking care of balancing my chakras, cleansing my aura, and removing blockages. The past 6 days though?! Insanity!

I’ve been doing a lot of visualizations and listening to a lot of guided meditations in order to balance mainly my throats chakra. I was super unfamiliar with chakras when I first started on all of this spiritual work, but recognizing that they are LEGIT and how they function and how making sure that they are functioning properly makes all the difference. For example, when I was young, I lived in a home where sadness was not something that was expressed. We didn’t talk about sad feelings, and only happy feelings. That suppression, the quieting of that tiny voice that just wanted to say, “I feel sad today. Can I have a hug?”, the constant swallowing of my words, led to an imbalance of my throat chakra. For as long as I can remember, I have had pretty significant issues with my throat, and usually chronic issues with certain parts of your body, likely relate to some imbalance of the chakra it is associated with. So, all of that to say, that since I have been clearing and balancing my throat (and all the other ones as well, but LOTS AND LOTS of work and speaking MY truth, and REALLY listening), I have had much more significant experiences. If I want to get technical, last week I went to church for ash Wednesday, and since that day, since the ashes were placed right on my Third Eye (which I thought was strange as it’s usually closer to your hairline), there has been an explosion of images and sounds.

I guess I’ll start by going back a little bit:

TAROT – A few weeks ago, early January, I kept having some pretty interesting dreams. In my dreams, I kept seeing Tarot Cards everywhere I went. For example, I’d get on the subway, and it would pull into the next station, and I would be looking out the window at the advertisements only to see an image of The Magician as a billboard. It stated happening pretty frequently, and so much so, that it was absolutely noticeable, so I went to my local Spirituality store, and picked out my tarot cards. I started by just taking a look at the cards and seeing how they felt to me. I didn’t realize what was happening or what the process of interpreting them was like for me, until I started reading a card or two for other people. The colors meant things to me. The images reminded me of life experiences that I could relate to. Hats on head started representing knowledge. Stones on the floor represented unmoving and firm, no sway. Stars were enlightenment, green meant love. So many things that didn’t makes sense were strangely making sense! And I just knew I was accurate. I knew this was my way of being able to channel Spirit. But it got crazier!

CRYSTALS – When this first started happening to me, I reached out to a blogger friend who I know is pretty in tune with her spiritual side, and she suggested that I get my hands on some energy/healing crystals to help ground me and protect me since it felt like I was feeling WAY too much energy at first and it was hella overwhelming. So, I bought a crystal…and slowly A crystal turned into 20 crystals turned into a 100+ crystals and growing! But here’s the thing…it’s not just about protection anymore. It’s almost like, and this is gonna sound crazy as shit for sure, but it’s almost like they tell me where to place them in order to really create an energy field, so to speak. Like, I see, in my head, where they should be placed. And the second that I place them where they should go, I get a focus on the next piece and where THAT one should go. And strangely , when they are all in the correct location, they sort of…ummm, sing, err, hum?? I KNOW! So freaking weird! But also, so freaking true. And to be completely honest, the mood changes. I use a lot of Rose Quartz, Malachite, Green Adventurine, and Lemurian Seed Crystals to make “Love” Crystal Grids and it changes the energy and creates a really loving, calm, and kind space. You can ask anyone that comes into our home, between the Sage, the Sandalwood incense, and the stones, you sit on my couch for 5 minutes, and you’re ready to pass out! It’s been….interesting.

SIGHTS AND SOUNDS – So, during my meditations, I often have these really quick flashing images that I don’t think mean anything, but then later on, I realize that they do. As a perfect example, I was talking to my wife the other day, and I must have zoned out for a second (Whoopsie! Sorry love!), and suddenly, I’m jarred back by this insane, shrill, ringing in my ears. So I tell my wife to stop talking for a second (I’m sure you expect that went over FANTASTICALLY!), I sit at the dining room table and I close my eyes and just listen to the thoughts that are streaming into my mind. Sometimes, it’s crazy stuff like “Rain is coming! Many will be hurt!”, to completely random words of encouragement like, “When the man with the red shirt comes, extend a hand, be kind!” and then, sure enough, 40 minutes later, a man with a red shirt will come in and ask for something, and I’ll be the one to help him. But, the screenshots below are some of the things stored on my phone…And if you play close attention to the meditation notes on 1/31, you’ll see, that this was sort of prophetic in that it’s actually happened, but not on February 3rd, instead, the THIRD week of February, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. I also follow a man’s blog (the same man who’s page I kept getting pulled to and felt compelled to have a psychic reading from) who has been ridiculously accurate with his world predictions, and I have been having so many images about possible stuff happening soon that I felt like I needed to reach out to him. His response to my email and screenshots was basically, “When I was reading that, my ears were ringing too! We need to talk!”. We’ll be chatting tomorrow morning about some of the stuff I have been experiencing. *Below are just some of the notes I’ve taken*

And all of this leads me to where I am today, with what’s been happening for about a week now since Ash Wednesday….

MEDIUMSHIP – Since last week, I have been able to communicate with people’s loved ones. It will happen randomly, and at first I had no idea what was happening. Last weekend was my younger sister’s Baby Shower. I knew I had to be there at 10am on Saturday morning to help my mom and sisters set up for the party, but all day Friday, from around 2pm, my stomach felt very strange. It felt riddled with anxiety and uncertainty. This uneasiness that wouldn’t allow me to eat or drink, and just felt really heavy and ominous. It felt sad and focused all abdominally. Needless to say, Friday and most of Saturday morning I didn’t eat a single thing. I just COULDN’T! It was a lot! I had never experienced that before, so I didn’t know what it was. The shower starts, and my sisters friend and some family stream in. My sister has had the same best friends since they were about 8 so I’m pretty familiar with my sisters 3 best friends, 2 of which are pregnant at the same time, and only ONE of which I knew about. Sitting at the table with them, we all started catching up. That’s when T told me she was pregnant, but she also started talking about some of her concerns, and some of the things that have been going on as far as ultrasounds go as well as the blood work that she is currently waiting for the results for. She said that the doctors had the results as of the day before but hadn’t given them to her until they schedule an appointment for her to go in this week. But the more she talked, the more that images kept coming into my head, and then suddenly, I saw her in my head the same way we were sitting and behind her I saw a shadow (all of this in my mind and not ACTUALLY visible) and the energy resonated in my chest and heart, and I KNEW! I knew right away that it was a woman, and since I had known that T’s grandmother had passed away, I knew it was her…and I saw everything that would happen with the baby, so I told her! And I told her what I saw in regards to the way her and her husband had been dealing with it. And then I saw her husband crying with his head on her pregnant belly and a shadow behind HIM that placed a hand on a shoulder. I felt the energy lower, like in my Solar Plexus, and I KNEW it was a male! So I asked if a father or grandfather had passed, to which she responded that yes, his father, which I had no idea about! Ultimately, all of the things I said were validated 100%, even a specific date that kept sticking out, and as soon as I was able to get all of the information out, the pressure and awkwardness in my belly was gone! Completely dissipated. Even my wife Callie couldn’t believe the accuracy. She’s sorta getting used to my random outbursts of “information”…LOL! So, yeah….that’s happening now too….and like, even seeing and feeling the energy of pregnant woman and their babies. Like, my sister is having a boy, and my little sister doesn’t know it, but she’ll be pregnant in about 3 months and she’s gonna be so excited that her boy is coming too! I feel him around her all the time now…he’s getting ready!

One of the things that I have heard and read a lot about in the spiritual community, is about the balancing, clearing, and opening of the main 7 chakras in order to be able to communicate with your Higher Self better, or in my case, my Spirit Guides. Part of this journey I’m on, is understanding how to clear some of the blockages of energy that I’ve been holding onto to get me to a more enlightened state if you will, and considering some of the crap I have been through in my life, BRING IT ON! Bring on the healing!

The thing about healing in this way, is that through meditation, when I least expect it, when the Universe feels I am ready, things start popping up in my mind, thoughts and images, flashes of things. Things that happened in my past, things that I have been holding onto, very vivid memories of things that I don’t really remember but deep down inside FEEL very real as if they HAD happened, and I process them. There really aren’t words to describe HOW this process works, but just the understanding that this process of releasing things that are not longer useful to me, is EXACTLY what I have been wanting/needing/looking for my entire adult life.

There have been so many things that have shown themselves to me during meditation. There are memories of times spent with my biological father when I was younger, memories that I honestly always thought were made up but always felt were real. There were vivid, painful memories of sexual abuse that were some of the hardest to have to “see” and live through again, but releasing all of that pain, all of that useless baggage that I was hanging onto and was effecting me without me even realizing it, was so incredibly liberating. And releasing that stuff??? It was like Independence Day and the barrage of explosions mixed with colorful lights that faded into black, into nothingness, but leave the slightest impression of something having been there before, leaving a welcome void where it once took up quite a bit of space.

I set my intentions before meditating and hope that it doesn’t all come on to quickly so I can better handle some of this stuff. Like, I’ve been able to let go of some old relationship stuff, even though it was really hard to let go of. That stuff was really holding me back from connecting to my wife and I didn’t even realize it until I let it go. Just so many interesting things coming up, and the process of releasing them has been such a beautiful experience allowing me the space to fill myself with some other stuff like beautiful memories with my children and wife, my family and closest friends. All the while that this is going on, also trying to be a better person.

There are some days where the work just seems too hard, too consuming, too debilitating but I remember that soon, all of that “too difficult” will turn into “totally liberating”, and all of that hard work makes it worth it. So, blockages to my chakra (the energy wheels that help keep us balanced) have slowly been lifted and I have started to balance and maintain my energy and my frequency elevated and happy and loving and kind. It has made all of the difference in helping with my connection to the universe. So much in fact that I have been getting some really important information and messages. I’ll post a blog about that later, because it’s just SO much stuff to add to this, but if I’m being honest, it’s kind of, ummm, well, world prediction-y. Some of which have already come true and that has not only left me speechless, but the people that I have told when it first came through during meditation have been lost for words as well. So with the blockages going away, the love of the universe can get all in…

There has been so much going on in the world lately, particularly the USA. EVERYTHING about these past 2 weeks have been so incredibly energetically charged, and for anyone that is in this awakening process (because there are LOADS of us!), you can only image the INTENSITY behind all of these feelings.

I have never been an emotional person. In fact, I can count the times on my two hands (with the exception of getting spankings when I was younger, and pregnancy!) that I have cried. I’ve even heard several people say that I can be really cold-hearted, and I mean, I can accept that. The old me WAS that person, but this NEW me is a hot mess of crazy, flowing, unfiltered emotions, and BOY!, it is so beautiful, but also, the WORST! I have an image to protect! SHEESH! But this always leads me to start thinking about being in these two different worlds.

There is the “Earth” Sammie. This 3 dimensional, programmed, free-on-a-long-tether kind of Sammie. The one that is still tied to all of these material things, these notions of how things are done because of how they are perceived. The Sammie that still lives to live for the desired outcome.

Then there is the “Light” Sammie. This high vibrational, living in peace and love, who is a kind and forgiving, high energy person who doesn’t watch TV and who isn’t tied down by the constraints of every day 3D living. The person who consciously remembers that living in the moment and living as I TRULY am is the best way to connect to the consciousness of this entire planet. It’s the best way to stay connected to my higher self, to my intuition, to my Guides (The Crew), to the Great Mother Gaia, and to my Higher Power.

One would think that it would be so easy to stay right in that “Light” all of the time. I mean, let’s be real here! Would you rather live in a roach infested studio apartment on the wrong side of the tracks, or a beautiful beach front property where the ocean breeze awakens your senses every morning? Easy choice! But what if everyone you know, everything you do, everything you need to know is on the other side of the tracks?

This need to know what is happening in our world and the pull to continue to gather all of this information, to stay involved in such a pivotal time in our country’s history has been really intense for me, but all of the brings down my vibration, and makes it harder to connect, and when I can’t connect I start to feel a little lost. A little despondent, and that leads to me getting sucked in even more.

Trying to balance being present in our society and actively involved and being aware of what is happening to me emotionally and spiritually as I continue on this journey, has been rather difficult, particularly this week with all of the Executive Orders being produced by our current president. Feeling the energies of the people around me, the energy of the collective, it’s….different now, and it makes it so hard to keep shifting between these two planes of “dark, heavy, loaded, charged, intense” and “airy, light, clear, grateful, peaceful”. The contrast between “loaded” and “lighted” is so drastically different, and living on “the line”, so to speak, can be really jarring.

So what have I been doing? How have I been managing this intense immersion in both worlds? How do I stay stable and manage all of these emotions and changes?

For starters, I’ve been staying really connected to the spiritual village I have created. I’ve been going to my healing circle on Tuesdays, connecting with other Superhero friends on lunch breaks for a quick bite or the commute home. I bought tarot cards and started channeling (and have been so RIDICULOUSLY accurate that even my wife’s mind has kinda been blown away, but the Tarot is for another post!). I pray a couple of times a day. I balance and clear my chakras. I get reiki done. I do my best to stay grounded. I help where I can. I hug when I can. I cry when I need to. I meditate. I meditate. I meditate!!!

I am staying connected to the “real world” by watching the news (which I KNOW I shouldn’t really be doing but I want to be engaged in conversation and KNOW what I’m taking about. Also, I’m the Lesbian daughter of Latino immigrants in a same sex relationship with my Caucasian red-haired wife, my foster/adopted daughter, and my 3 multiracial children that were delivered by BOTH of us, although they are 100% biological siblings and the news currently is SUPER relevant to my life), getting out into the world and engaging with the people around me. Staying abreast of rally’s and community events. Donating money and time to make changes to our wonderful planet and our great country (despite our new leader!). Finding volunteer opportunities where I can share with my children the heart of sharing your time and energy for a common good.

And that’s when it hit me! That’s when I realized that my ENTIRE life I have absolutely been living in this EXACT SAME SPACE, except this time, I actually know what is going on when I have all of these “racing thoughts” and all of these flutters in my chest and tummy, this sort of aloof and disconnected feeling. I’m recognizing now that being in this two different worlds is such a blessing. Knowing what I’m feeling, knowing that I can contribute to my world and my society BECAUSE I understand this other side of me, has shifted things.

When I feel overwhelmed by what is going on around me, I meditate. When people are engaged in deep and sometimes heated conversation, I can come in and infuse it with kindness and visualize love and kindness pouring from me to them. When I feel sadness from the souls that I see on television telling their stories of joy and triumph or pain and strife, I send them healing energy. All of that is so much better than just sitting in the uncertainty and the uncomfortability. To know that my energy can be sent out into the world, that it’s REAL…that really changes things. And it has made this duality, this conundrum of living in these two worlds, not only just bearable, but a lot more intersting and fulfilling…

During meditation last night I saw the following which leads me too believe that the previous vision I had are connected.

I was in a black and yellow checkered cab. It was raining outside. There were people outside with jackets and hats on holding black umbrellas. To my left I saw a red telephone booth that gave me the impression that I was in London. The cab made a right hand turn and in front of me was Buckingham Palace.

My gut tells me these are connected, and the weather and the attire made it feel like it would be this winter. I’ll continue to ask Spirit for whatever meanings they are trying to give me. I’m sure I’ll get more info soon…

I was looking at China from above, and quickly I descended to the ground and there was a Chinese woman standing in front of me. I could not see her face, but she waved like royalty. I waved back and then walked away. I felt sadness in my chest as if something terrible were going to happen to her and she was actually waving good-bye.

I got the feeling that she was royalty, but I feel like the connection could be to the British Royal family. Perhaps the Queen will pass. I’ve asked Spirit to give me more information, and to clarify what it means, but I have nothing yet.

I heard,”there isn’t much time….” but there was nothing else.

I feel this need to sit in silence, to increase my meditation practice. Something about the urgency and the clarity in what I am seeing, hearing, and feeling. I’m feeling compelled to go to meditation and healing circles in order to connect with people and see if the combined energy and elevated frequency will give me more information. I wish I had more time, and that my mind were a little quieter so that I can “hear” better.

There are so many unexpected things that have happened to me in the process of “growing” spiritually. One of the most interesting things to try to work through is convincing myself that it’s not all in my head. That the things that I hear, or the things that I sense and feel are real. This has been confirmed time and time again, and I STILL have such a hard time relinquishing control of the things I can’t see/control/understand. For example, when I first started meditating, clearing blockages, and starting to do some of the harder work, peoples names would pop into my head randomly. They weren’t just random people though, they are people from my past that I had a connection with for one reason or another.

One woman I knew from high school, and her name was the first to come up. I actually babysat her son for quite some time, and her son and I have always been very connected. It was a time in my life, when my own wife was having a hard time getting pregnant, and me and that little guy connected. He brought so much light into my life. It forced me to go out for walks, play in the leaves, feel the sun on my skin. Otherwise, I would have stayed home and really lost myself in the sadness of not being able to be a parent. Needless to say, her name was the first one I heard. I couldn’t shake it, so I looked her up. Wouldn’t you know, she had completely revamped her Inst.agram page to reflect the spiritual journey that she was on. We connected, and right in time, as it made it easier to realize that I wasn’t the only person this was happening to. And even better, I knew her to be similar to me. Not your average, stereotypical (for lack of better terminology) “hocus pocus” kinda cultish, weirdo psychic that so many people are used to perceiving as mediums, or empaths, or clairvoyant/audient/sentient people. It was nice that I knew, for a fact, that she was…well, normal. We connected, and we are both helping each other on this journey, and it’s been such a nice relationship to have during this process.

It’s happened several other times. 3, to be exact, where I heard their names, clear as day, and sure enough, I look them up, I seek them out, I kind of give them an inkling of what’s been going on with me, and BOOM! The connection is made, an incredulous, “YOU TOO!!!! OMG!!! NO FREAKING WAY!” happens, and we’ve been meeting up, talking, helping each other, and understanding that we are all on different “missions” to bring whatever it is we have to bring to the world table. It’s really been awesome and so beautiful to reconnect with these people and figure out NOW exactly why we were put in each others lives. It confirms that this isn’t “all in my head”.

Last Friday, I had a pretty interesting and intense experience. I meditated in the morning on my commute to work, and I asked my guides to continue to guide me on my mission in this life. To continue to allow me to find and complete my purpose. It got me thinking about the time that I went to Callie’s aunts house (she is a master reiki healer, spiritualist, and Intuitive) and she told me that my guide Susan connected with me because she had committed suicide (by hanging) and her energy really resembled mine. That she really connected to me. Which to me made plenty of sense. Interestingly enough, there was one time when I tried to take my own life (by hanging) and the extension cord broke. I should say, the extension cord was cut, but no one was home with me. I awoke, on the floor, convulsing, with no recollection of what had happened until I read my journal entry from about 20 minutes before. It was interesting that she would mention that, without having known that about my life. So when I was sitting at my computer and I heard Susan Jamison**, considering all of the connections I’ve made when I heard a name in my head, I decided to google it.

You wouldn’t believe what I came across. It was a post, on a website for people whose family members had committed suicide. I started reading the story that this mother was writing about her daughter, who in junior year of high school had taken her own life. They found her outside, but before I even finished the text, I knew how it ended, and I saw her mom, on the edge of the bed, with an item that I couldn’t discern, passing it back and forth in her hands. And I knew, I had to reach out to her, but how? So I searched Susan’s name again, with some extra key words, and sure enough, her mom had been picked to be featured in a book similar to the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” series about what I assume are parents who lost their children to suicide, and it listed a name. I googled the name, and Mom was the first FB entry to show up. I found her, searched her page, and saw Susan’s face. The hairs stood up on the back of my neck, my head started tingling, my palms got sweaty, and I couldn’t shake the fact that I felt like I NEEDED to reach out to her mother.

So I did………Friends, it was so beautiful to be able to give her the following message…

“…Susan is telling me to tell you that she loves you so much, and that she is happy and at peace. She said that you keep something of hers and you look it at it at night and pass it between your hands. The times that you have felt a hand or a soft touch on your shoulder, it’s her….She doesn’t blame you, but she knew that there was something important for her to do….”

The wildest thing is, before I write ANYTHING anymore, I pray that I have help finding the right words. I don’t even really remember writing this stuff, which makes it more interesting. About 2 hours later, I receive a response…

and even today…

I was accurate…and this is what I mean…I have to start trusting myself, and my gut, and the messages that I receive, because they make a difference. They are valid. Maybe, all these years, all this time, it really WAS in my head, and that, I’m starting to realize, is a beautiful thing….

Every year, before the new year rolls around, for a couple of years now actually, I scour the innanets for any and everything Predictions 20**. This year, was no different! As my trolling searching was underway, there was one particular site I was drawn to. Considering that I have been doing this annually for about 5 y ears or so, it was interesting that I hadn’t seen this page before. It is also about 5 years old. After a little over a week of combing through his blog posts, I was convinced that his worldwide predictions were in fact true (about 90% of them! I KNOW!) and I sort of became obsessed like I haven’t in the past. I also think it was a welcome distraction from the streaming of CNN and MSNBC with all of it’s addictive (and divisive) election coverage, so it made it a little easier to get sucked in. I kept convincing myself not to get a reading from him (no frivolous spending rule), but my gut kept telling me, “Just do it! What have you got to lose? He’s pretty accurate right? You can prove that! Just do it!” So I sent him an email. A day later I get a response that the day and time I wanted was available, and that as soon as I submitted my payment through Pa.yPal we were good to go, and he would give me all of the instructions I needed.

Email? Check! Payment? Check! Instructions? CHECK! I was to send him an email, with only my first name , birth time, current time zone, and age. And at 1pm EXACTLY on November 7th (the day before the election results), I had my reading. He called, confirmed the information, took 2-3 minutes to connect to Spirit, asked if I was ready, to which I almost replied, “uh, DUH!” before I realized, “that’s proooooobably, not the best response!”, actually said, “Yes, please” (which, why!?!), and then the first thing he said was, “They are telling me that I need to tell you (pause)……..you’re Clairaudient.” To which I said (outloud) “Oh, cool…”, but also (in my head) “DAFUQ is dat!?!?”

“So, Clairaudience means ‘clear hearing’. Basically, you hear messages from your guides. You have been hearing them for a while, and you’re guides have been trying to communicate with you for a long time. That incessant ringing in your ears and the constant popping even when you’ve been sitting in the same place all day (cue panic because since Austin was born, it hasn’t stopped!), that’s them. That’s when you break that plane and the frequency changes…Spirit is trying to get your attention (his fingers snapping quickly) like they’re saying ‘Hey! Listen up! We’re tryna tell you something!”

And from there it all changed. He told me things about my life that there was no way he could have known, like not getting discouraged about not getting the promotion that I went for recently, that there is something better than that coming for me, and that it is the next step in my movement upwards! I like that shit! It’s classy! He also told me that I have children, and one is similar to the other as in twins (accurate!) and that one of my boys, (the dark haired one, also accurate!) had flames coming out of his head (which scared the crap outta me) but it turns out it means that he’s special too….my son is a healer! He mentioned that my wife Callie is as close to my soulmate as it gets…and I love that, because I honestly felt it the second I laid eyes on that woman (we married on 111, and our kids were born on 111, as if that’s not one of the most divine numbers!), and it hasn’t faltered since. So many things, which I could not ignore, so I felt like I had no choice BUT to believe him.

I started researching, I started praying, I started meditating and learning to tap into my ability/ies (there’s possible claricognizance – ‘clear knowing’), but I have to be honest. I think tapping in is where this journey started, but it has completely morphed into making ME better. The best way to elevate yourself to change your frequency, to change your vibration, is to practice LOVE, COMPASSION, and KINDNESS to all living things, but especially ourselves. And in doing so, you attract those things, because, you know, laws of attraction and stuff.

Guys, the self talk about how terrible, untalented, mean, ugly, scared, cowardly, fat, weak I am was, was so intense that it did not allow me to really connect with this beautiful soul that I have, and not just me, but like, EVERYONE! I wasn’t connecting with others in the way that I now know is possible (and incredibly beautiful!). The interesting thing too though, is that all of these physical symptoms of “Awakening” that I started experiencing the very next day as I sat with my best friend, completely flabbergasted by the results, and feeling a heaviness that I have never felt in my life. A terrible night of sleeplessness and fear, I woke, got ready for work, and headed out the door. I wish there were words to describe the heaviness that I felt. The fear, the despair, the anger, and even, the joy of the people around me. It was the strangest sensation, smack in the middle of my chest. Almost like anxiety feels but heavier, and disassociated somehow, if that makes sense, like it wasn’t mine. All day, and then the next 3 days, until I spoke to a friend who told me about prayers to Archangels, and crystals and stones to help keep negative energy away, or at least lessen it, and who taught me to envelop myself in a bubble of light for protection, and I pray for her and her family to be blessed every day, because how she showed me to protect myself is something I cannot repay…the information she gave me is invaluable! I’m truly so, so grateful to her, and to all of the people who have re-entered my life in this time of enlightenment. Since that day, since 11/7, I have been receiving messages. Since then, I have meditated and connected with my Spirit Guides, and I have connected with people from my past who are also on a very spiritual journey that (bless the Universe) make me feel a little less….crazy…

If I’m being honest here, we all have the ability to silence our minds (with a bit practice), connect with our inner self, our loved ones, our Spirit Guides (who are with us, legit, ALL. THE. TIME!) and find so much peace and love and kindness. Have your ears been ringing/popping/pulling/feeling plugged constantly? Can you not get rid of the heaviness in your chest? Have your dreams been more and more vivid, pulling people from random times in your life that you somehow still feel really connected to? The incessant headaches? The ridiculously emotional responses to everything (everything makes you cry, or laugh, and things just feel more intense suddenly)? You too friend, might be awakening. Maybe with a little meditation, and a little self-love and kindness, you might awaken too….after all, as a dear friend of mine says, We all have the potential to be Superheroes….