Haha she loves him from the beginning but can't bring herself to admit it at first. She always finds him irresistible in some way:)

Good parallelism with the "gaze #" and then "story." This is well-written.

In the sentence at the top "Nothing in him interested her - but the fan girls that seemed to always drool around him." Are you trying to say that the only thing Tenten found interesting about Neji was his number of fangirls; or are you trying to say that while Tenten didn't find Neji interesting, a lot of fan girls did? If it is the latter case, I would change the sentence to "Nothing in him interested her - but the fan girls seemed to always drool around him," cutting out the "that."

I love it! This story is irresistibly irresistable! Neji is really cute and I love how TenTen observes everything about him. From being lonely, blunt, gentlemanly, sweet, sane, handsome, shy, lovable, jealous and irresistable.