Medical School: Apparently Not the Place to Learn Tact.

I am significantly knocked up after lots of fertility treatments. But it doesn't really change anything, except that I don't have to shoot up any drugs or show anyone my vagina first thing in the morning (not for a while, anyway).

But I feel exactly the same.

It is not fun for me to hold a baby. I still don't want to go to baby showers. I still can't muster the excitement for someone who gets pregnant easily that I can for someone who has to shoot up and show their vagina to get pregnant. I visibly cringe upon receipt of a pregnancy announcement.

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At my first OB visit (click here to read), I left there completely disappointed. I guess I got used to the way that the nurses and doctors at the RE office handled things. They coddled me and told me all the things I wanted to hear.

The OB was different. So different, in fact, that I have decided to change doctors. The thing that keeps blazing through my mind is his need to say to my husband, "Hey, buddy, it works!"

Well, that really depends, doesn't it?

I mean, yes. His penis does, in fact, work. The penis is not the problem - he is actually an excellent worker and probably deserves a promotion. The sperm are the bastards who need to be fired and replaced with some more ambitious candidates, but it is complicated and involves unions, DNA, and biology. (And apparently you can't hire sperm on Monster.)

I'm always amazed by the lack of common sense about infertility. I mean, you're an OB, and you know your patient just went through IVF with ICSI to treat male factor infertility. So when you say something about the workings of the penis, you should probably be ready for a response that involves you being called another name for a penis.

I imagine that another couple would laugh, and maybe high five their moron OB for pointing out the fact that, Huzzah! Your husband's penis can function! Pizza for everyone! I imagine that a woman with no fertility troubles, or a couple not ever even considering male factor infertility, would forget the comment immediately after it fell out of his mouth.

But not me. I'm mad about it. I cancelled my appointment and will never go back, but still can't shake the anger over the complete lack of sensitivity.

I really believe that I will always be infertile. I will always feel like this, I will always be sensitive to this.

How about you? Have you had children after infertility and had a different experience? Are you pregnant now, but still feel like you're standing on the wrong side of the fence?

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