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Lead by example not by force. - Contributed by Dan Kelly and all his friends Illinois

Motivate them train them care about them and make winners out of them we know that if we treat our employees correctly they'll treat the customers right and if customers are treated right they'll come back. - J Marriot, Jr.

Motivation is what gets you started habit is what keeps you going. - Jim Ryun

Nothing makes a person more productive than the last minute. - Contributed by Jeff Pappas

Obstacles are the those frightful things you see When you take your mind off your goals. - Contributed by Sophie & Charlotte Burtt

Partnerships are the basis for success. - Neal Prescot Washington

People who feel good about themselves, produce good results. - Submitted by Dan Kelly and all his friends Illinois

Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. - William Feather

The bitterness of poor quality remains long after low pricing is forgotten!!! - Leon M CautilloIf

The desire to have things done quickly Invariably prevents them from being done thoroughly. - Sent by Jody C Burnett California

The most important thing in communication is hearing What isn't being said. - Anonymous

The only safe ship in a storm is leadership. - Contributed by Nadine Bent Pennsylvania

The sale begins when the customer says yes. - Harvey Mackay

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

To lead a symphony You must occasionally turn your back on the crowd. - Anonymous

Warning: Dates in calendar are closer than they appear.

Ask five economists and you'll get five different answers (six if one went to Harvard).. - Edgar R. Fiedler

Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists.. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Capitalism is the astounding belief that the most wickedest of men will do the most wickedest of things for the greatest good of everyone. - Keynes

Money couldnt buy friends, but you get a better class of enemy. - Spike Milligan

An executive is a person who always decides; sometimes he decides correctly, but he always decides. - John H. Patterson

An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today. - Laurence J. Peter

Money, it turned out, was exactly like sex: you thought of nothing else if you didn't have it, and thought of other things if you did.

I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position. - Mark Twain

When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion. - Voltaire

A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward. - Anonymous

Use soft words in hard arguments. - H. G. Bohn, 1855

A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. - Caskie Stinnett

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value. - Albert Einstein

There are two rules for success... 1) Never tell everything you know. - Roger H. Lincoln

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains. - Winston Churchill

Courage is the first of human qualities because it is the quality that guarantees all the others. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

Danger - if you meet it promptly and without flinching - you will reduce the danger by half. Never run away from anything. Never! - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

Dictators ride to and fro upon tigers which they dare not dismount. And the tigers are getting hungry. - Winston Churchill

Everyone has his day and some days last longer than others. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

For my part, I consider that it will be found much better by all parties to leave the past to history, especially as I propose to write that history myself. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put. - Winston Churchill

Give us the tools and we will finish the job. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

History will be kind to me for I intend to write it. - Winston Churchill

I always avoid prophesying beforehand, because it is a much better policy to prophesy after the event has already taken place. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I am always willing to learn. I do not, however, always enjoy being taught. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I am certainly not one of those who need to be prodded. In fact, if anything, I am the prod. - Sir Winston Churchill

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. - Winston Churchill

I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I gather, young man, that you wish to be a Member of Parliament. The first lesson that you must learn is, when I call for statistics about the rate of infant mortality, what I want is proof that fewer babies died when I was Prime Minister than when anyone else was Prime Minister. That is a political statistic. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I like a man who grins when he fights. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

If we open a quarrel between the past and the present, we shall find that we have lost the future. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time--a tremendous whack. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

If you will not fight for the right when you can easily win without bloodshed, if you will not fight when your victory will be sure and not too costly, you may come to the moment when you will have to fight with all the odds against you and only a small chance of survival. There may even be a worse case: you may have to fight when there is no hope of victory, because it is better to perish than to live as slaves. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

In wartime, truth is so precious that she should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried. - Winston Churchill

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

It is a socialist idea that making profits is a vice; I consider the real vice is making losses. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

It is no use saying, 'We are doing our best.' You have got to succeed in doing what is necessary. - Sir Winston Churchill

Kites rise highest against the wind - not with it. - Winston Churchill

Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duty, and so bear ourselves that, if the British Empire and its Commonwealth lasts for a thousand years, men will still say, 'This was their finest hour.' - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

MacDonald has the gift of compressing the largest amount of words into the smallest amount of thoughts. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most times he will pick himself up and carry on. - Winston Churchill

Many forms of Government have been tried, and will be tried in this world of sin and woe. No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that democracy is the 'worst' form of Government except all those others that have been tried from time to time. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

My wife and I tried to breakfast together, but we had to stop or our marriage would have been wrecked. - Winston Churchill

The empires of the future are the empires of the mind. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

The farther backward you can look, the farther forward you are likely to see. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries. - Winston Churchill

The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity. - Winston Churchill

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself. - Sir Winston Churchill

The price of greatness is responsibility. - Sir Winston Churchill

The problems of victory are more agreeable than the problems of defeat, but they are no less difficult. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

The reserve of modern assertions is sometimes pushed to extremes, in which the fear of being contradicted leads the writer to strip himself of almost all sense and meaning. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

The whole history of the world is summed up in the fact that, when nations are strong, they are not always just, and when they wish to be just, they are no longer strong. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

There are a lot of lies going around.... and half of them are true. - Winston Churchill

There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

This is the type of arrant pedantry up with which we shall not put. - Winston Churchill

Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace and those who could make a good peace would never have won the war. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

To build may have to be the slow and laborious task of years. To destroy can be the thoughtless act of a single day. - Sir Winston Churchill

Vast and fearsome as the human scene has become, personal contact of the right people, in the right places, at the right time, may yet have a potent and valuable part to play in the cause of peace which is in our hearts. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give. - Winston Churchill

We shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and the oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

Well, dinner would have been splendid... if the wine had been as cold as the soup, the beef as rare as the service, the brandy as old as the fish, and the maid as willing as the Duchess. - Winston Churchill

Where does the family start? It starts with a young man falling in love with a girl - no superior alternative has yet been found. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

Why Sir Churchill you are drunk! "And you are ugly, but I shall be sober in the morning!" - a conversation between Lady Nancy Astor and Winston Churchill

Without tradition, art is a flock of sheep without a shepherd. Without innovation, it is a corpse. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else. - Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A good intention but fixed and resolute - bent on high and holy ends, we shall find means to them on every side and at every moment; and even obstacles and opposition will but make us "like the fabled spectre-ships," which sail the fastest in the very teeth of the wind. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man makes inferiors his superiors by heat; self-control is the rule. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man of genius is privileged only as far as he is genius. His dullness is as insupportable as any other dullness. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man's library is a sort of harem. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man's wife has more power over him than the state has. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

All conservatives are such from personal defects. They have been effeminated by position or nature, born halt and blind, through luxury of their parents, and can only, like invalids, act on the defensive. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

All mankind love a lover. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

All our progress is an unfolding, like a vegetable bud. You have first an instinct, then an opinion, then a knowledge as the plant has root, bud, and fruit. Trust the instinct to the end. though you can render no reason. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Art is a jealous mistress, and if a man has a genius for painting, poetry, music, architecture or philosophy, he makes a bad husband and an ill provider. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Bad times have a scientific value. These are occasions a good learner would not miss. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Beauty without grace is the hook without the bait. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

By necessity, by proclivity, and by delight, we all quote. In fact, it is as difficult to appropriate the thoughts of others as it is to invent. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

By the rude bridge that arched the flood, Their flag to April's breeze unfurled, Here once the embattled farmers stood, And fired the shot heard round the world. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Can anything be so elegant as to have few wants, and to serve them one's self? - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Children are all foreigners. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Commit a crime and the earth is made of glass. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Common sense is genius dressed in working clothes. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Condense some daily experience into a glowing symbol, and an audience is electrified. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Conversation is an art in which a man has all mankind for competitors. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they are a little course, and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice. Up again, you shall never be so afraid of a tumble. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do the thing we fear, and death of fear is certain. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do what you know and perception is converted into character. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every great and commanding movement in the annals of the world is the triumph of enthusiasm. Nothing great was ever achieved without it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every hero becomes a bore at last. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Finish each day before you begin the next, and interpose a solid wall of sleep between the two. This you cannot do without temperance. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Foolish legislation is a rope of sand, which perishes in the twisting. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Great men are they who see that spiritual is stronger than any material force, that thoughts rule the world. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Happiness is a perfume which you cannot pour on someone without getting some on yourself. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

He is great who confers the most benefits. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

He who has a thousand friends Has not a friend to spare, While he who has one enemy Shall meet him everywhere. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Hitch your wagon to a star. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I dip my pen in the blackest ink, because I am not afraid of falling into my inkpot. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I like the silent church before the service begins, batter than any preaching. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I look on that man as happy, who, when there is question of success, looks into his work for a reply. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If a man knows the law, find out, though he live in a pine shanty, and resort to him. And if a man can pipe or sing, so as to wrap the imprisoned soul in an Elysium; or can paint a landscape, and convey into souls and ochres all the enchantments of Spring or Autumn; or can liberate and intoxicate all people who hear him with delicious songs and verses; it is certain that the secret cannot be kept; the first witness tells it to a second, and men go by fives and tens and fifties to his doors. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If the colleges were better, if they really had it, you would need to get the police at the gates to keep order in the inrushing multitude. See in college how we thwart the natural love of learning by leaving the natural method of teaching what each wishes to learn, and insisting that you shall learn what you have no taste or capacity for. The college, which should be a place of delightful labour, is made odious and unhealthy, and the young men are tempted to frivolous amusements to rally their jaded spirits. I would have the studies elective. Scholarship is to be created not by compulsion, but by awakening a pure interest in knowledge. The wise instructor accomplishes this by opening to his pupils precisely the attractions the study has for himself. The marking is a system for schools, not for the college; for boys, not for men; and it is an ungracious work to put on a professor. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If we encounter a man of rare intellect, we should ask him what books he reads. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

In every work of genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts: they come back to us with a certain alienated majesty. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Intellect annuls fate. So far as a man thinks, he is free. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Is not marriage an open question, when it is alleged, from the beginning of the world, that such as are in the institution wish to get out, and such as are out wish to get in? - Ralph Emerson

It is not length of life, but depth of life. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life, that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is very easy in the world to live by the opinion of the world. It is very easy in solitude to be self-centred. But the finished man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude. I knew a man of simple habits and earnest character who never put out his hands nor opened his lips to court the public, and having survived several rotten reputations of younger men, honour came at last and sat down with him upon his private bench from which he had never stirred. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It makes a great difference in the force of a sentence, whether a man be behind it or no. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It was a high counsel that I once heard given to a young person, "Always do what you are afraid to do." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Life is eating us up. We all shall be fables presently. Keep cool: it will be all one a hundred years hence. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Man is a piece of the universe made alive. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Man was born to be rich, or grow rich by use of his faculties, by the union of thought with nature. Property is an intellectual production. The game requires coolness, right reasoning, promptness, and patience in the players. Cultivated labour drives out brute labour. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men are conservatives when they are least vigorous, or when they are most luxurious. They are conservatives after dinner. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men are what their mothers made them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Money, which represents the prose of life, and which is hardly spoken of in parlours without an apology, is, in its effects and laws, as beautiful as roses. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Nature hates calculators. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Nature is a mutable cloud, which is always and never the same. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Nature is full of freaks, and now puts an old head on young shoulders, and then takes a young heart heating under fourscore winters. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Never read any book that is not a year old. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Next to the originator of a good sentence is the first quoter of it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

No great man ever complains of want of opportunity. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Peace cannot be achieved through violence, it can only be attained through understanding. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

People only see what they are prepared to see. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

People wish to be settled. It is only as far as they are unsettled that there is any hope for them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Proverbs are the literature of reason, or the statements of absolute truth, without qualification. Like the sacred books of each nation, they are the sanctuary of its intuitions. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Science does not know its debt to imagination. Goethe did not believe that a great naturalist could exist without this faculty. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Self-trust is the essence of heroism. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Solitude, the safeguard of mediocrity. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Sooner of later that which is now life shall be poetry, and every fair and manly trait shall add a richer strain to the song. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Speak what you think to-day in words as hard as cannon-balls and to-morrow speak what to-morrow thinks in hard words again, though it contradict every thing you said to-day. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Stay at home in your mind. Don't recite other people's opinions. I hate quotations. Tell me what you know. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Strong men greet war, tempest, hard times. They wish, as Pindar said, to tread the floors of hell, with necessities as hard as iron. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Take egotism out and you would castrate the benefactors. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Tell them dear, that if eyes were made for seeing, Then beauty is its own excuse for being: Why thou wert there, O rival of the rose! I never sought to ask, I never knew: But, in my simple ignorance suppose The selfsame power that brought me there brought you. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The adventitious beauty of poetry may be felt in the greater delight with a verse given in a happy quotation than in the poem. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The ancestor of every action is a thought. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The best effect of fine persons is felt after we have left their presence. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The best lightning rod for your protection is your own spine. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The essence of all jokes, of all comedy, seems to be an honest or well intended halfness; a non performance of that which is pretended to be performed, at the same time that one is giving loud pledges of performance. The balking of the intellect, is comedy and it announces itself in the pleasant spasms we call laughter. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The faith that stand on authority is not faith. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The greatest homage we can pay truth is to use it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The imbecility of men is always inviting the impudence of power. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The invariable mark of wisdom is to see the miraculous in the common. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The key to every man is his thought. Sturdy and defying though he look, he has a helm which he obeys, which is the idea after which all his facts are classified. He can only be reformed by showing him a new idea which commands his own. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The less a man thinks or knows about his virtues, the better we like him. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The life of man is the true romance, which when it is valiantly conducted, will yield the imagination a higher joy than any fiction. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The louder he talked of his honour, the faster we counted our spoons. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The measure of a master is his success in bringing all men around to his opinion twenty years later. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The moment we indulge our affections, the earth is metamorphosed, there is no winter and no night; all tragedies, all ennuis, vanish, - all duties even. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The next thing to saying a good thing yourself, is to quote one. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The only reward of virtue is virtue. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The only way to have a friend is to be one. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The peril of every fine faculty is the delight of playing with it for pride. Talent is commonly developed at the expense of character, and the greater it grows, the more is the mischief. Talent is mistaken for genius, a dogma or system for truth, ambition for greatest, ingenuity for poetry, sensuality for art. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The power of love, as the basis of a State, has never been tried. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The reward for a thing well done is to have done it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The sufferers parade their miseries, tear lint from their bruises, reveal their indictable crimes, that you may pity them. They like sickness, because physical pain will extort some show of interest from bystanders, as we have seen children, who, finding themselves of no account when grown people come in, will cough till they choke, to draw attention. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The years teach much which the days never knew. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are no days in life so memorable as those which vibrated to some stroke of the imagination. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are two classes of poets - the poets by education and practice, these we respect; and poets by nature, these we love. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is always room for a man of force, and he makes room for many. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is no strong performance without a little fanaticism in the performer. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is no thought in any mind, but it quickly tends to convert itself into a power. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is nothing capricious in nature and the implanting of a desire indicates that its gratification is in the constitution of the creature that feel it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

This time, like all time, is a very good one if we but know what to do with it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Those who cannot tell what they desire or expect, still sigh and struggle with indefinite thoughts and vast wishes. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To be great is to be misunderstood. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men-that is genius. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To different minds, the same world is a hell, and a heaven. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To fill the hour-that is happiness. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded! - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To share often and much; to leave the world a little better; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. That is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To the dull mind all nature is leaden. To the Illuminated mind the whole world burns and sparkle with lights. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To the poet, to the philosopher, to the saint, all things are friendly and sacred, all events profitable, all days holy, all men divine. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Trust your instinct to the end, though you can render no reason. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Truth is the summit of being; justice is the application of it to affairs. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Universities are of course hostile to geniuses, which, seeing and using ways of their own, discredit the routine: as churches and monasteries persecute youthful saints. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We aim above the mark to hit the mark. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are always getting ready to live but never living. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are born believing. A man bears beliefs, as a tree bears apples. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are prisoners of ideas. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are shut up in schools and college recitation rooms for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bellyfull of words and do not know a thing. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are students of words; we are shut up in schools, and colleges, and recitation rooms, for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bag of wind, a memory of words, and do not know a thing. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are wiser than we know. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We boil at different degrees. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

We but half express ourselves, and are ashamed of that divine idea which each of us represents. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What a searching preacher of self-command is the varying phenomenon of health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Whatever games are played with us, we must play no games with ourselves. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Who so would be a man, must be a nonconformist. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Without a rich heart, wealth is an ugly beggar. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Women see better than men. Men see lazily, if they do not expect to act. Women see quite without any wish to act. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why and Where phases. "For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question 'How can we eat?' the second by the question 'Why do we eat?' and the third by the question 'Where shall we have lunch?'"

"The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea...

There is a theory that states: "If anyone finds out what the universe is for it will disappear and be replaced by something more bazaarly inexplicable." There is another theory that states: "This has already happened...."

This planet has -- or rather had -- a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.

All my life I said I wanted to be someone...I can see now that I should have been more specific.

Life is wasted on the living.- Zaphod Beeblebrox IV

In the beginning I was made. I didn't ask to be made. No one consulted me or considered my feelings in this matter. But if it brought some passing fancy to some lowly humans as they haphazardly pranced their way through life's mournful jungle then so be it.- Marvin the Paranoid Android

To be, or what?- Sylvester Stallone

Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you wont either. - Joseph Fischer

"Laugh and the world laughs with you; snore and you sleep alone. " Anthony Burgess

"Space...is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly hugely mindbogglingly big it is. I mean you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space. " Douglas Adams

In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry, and has been widely regarded as a bad idea. - Douglas Adam

Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.

Save a tree. Eat a beaver.

Sorry, no quote today.

There are three kinds of people in the world, those who can count, and those who can't.

Gravity doesn't excist, the earth ****s.

Blind men don't bungi jump, it scares the dog too much.

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing - Mark Twain

Humor is the shortest distance between two people - Henry Youngman

The trouble with my wife is that she is a whore in the kitchen and a cook in the bed. - Geoffrey Gorer

"It is a good thing to follow the first law of holes; if you are in one stop digging. " Denis Healey

In his novel ''Dog Years,'' Gunter Grass parodies Heideggerese in the character of a German Air Force auxiliary named Stortebeker, who ''created a philosophical schoolboy language that was soon prattled by many, with varying success.'' Every commonplace incident or object can be rechristened in Stortebeker/Heidegger's hilarious language. Underdone potatoes in the mess kitchen, for example, are ''spuds forgetful of Being.'' Stortebeker relaxes by catching rats, so they are the object of some of his best ruminations: ''The rat withdraws itself by unconcealing itself into the ratty. So the rat errates the ratty, illuminating it with errancy. For the ratty has come-to-be in the errancy where the rat errs and so fosters error.''

Does anyone REALLY read these stupid quotes?

ebius tagline. This is a moebius tagline. This is a mo

Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.

Love your enemies just in case your friends turn out to be a bunch of *******s.

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Okay, who stopped payment on my reality check?

Time is the best teacher; unfortunately, it kills all its students.

Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

Gravity is a myth, the Earth ****s.

What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.

I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?

Life is sexually transmitted.

A good laugh is sunshine in a house. (William Makepeace Thackeray)

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. (Ashleigh Brilliant)

I have great faith in fools--self-confidence my friends call it. (Edgar Allan Poe)

I never make mistakes. I thought I did once, but I was wrong. (Anonymous)

If Karl, instead of writing a lot about capital, had made a lot of it ... it would have been much better. (Karl Marx's mother)

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me. (Ambrose Bierce)

I'd probably be famous now if I wasn't such a good waitress. (Jane Siberry)

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?!"

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: My Reality Check bounced.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, 'cuz, like, you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

Red meat isn't bad for you. Fuzzy green meat is.

If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

He who laughs, lasts.

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. - A. Whitney Brown

Ford Prefect: We're safe. Arthur Dent: Ah. Good. Ford Prefect: We're in a cabin of one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet. Arthur Dent: Ah. This is obviously some strange usage of the word "safe" that I hadn't previously been aware of.

Announcer: Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the galaxy lies a small, unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly 92 million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a really neat idea.

Arthur Dent: You know, it's at times like this, when I'm stuck in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, about to die of asphyxiation in deep space, that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young. Ford Prefect: Why? What did she tell you? Arthur Dent: I don't know. I didn't listen.

Marvin: It gives me a headache just trying to think down to your level.

Zaphod Beeblebrox: Computer, if you don't open that exit hatch pretty damn pronto, I shall go straight to your major data banks with a very large axe and give you a reprogramming you will never forget, capisco? [Pause] Okay. Get the axe.

Marvin: Life. Loathe it or ignore it. You can't like it.

Slartibartfast: Is that your robot? Marvin: No. I'm mine.

Dish of the Day: Good evening, madame and gentlemen. I am the main dish of the day. May I interest you in parts of my body?

"Life without you would be like a broken pencil." "How's that?" "Completely pointless." (Blackadder, Series II)

98% of all statistics are made up. (Anonymous)

Blind people don't bungee jump. It scares the dog too much.

I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather. Not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.

When it's fall in New York, the air smells like as if someone's been frying goats in it, and if you are keen to breath the best plan is to open a window and stick your head in a building. -- Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless

"I wasn't kidding. I do have a test today. It's on European Socialism. What's the big deal? I'm not European. I don't plan on becoming European. So why should I care if they're socialists? They could be facist, anarchist pigs. It still wouldn't change the fact that I don't have a car." --Ferris Bueller (Ferris Bueller's Day Off)

Some people play hard to get. I play hard to want

Evil Robot Ted: Aim for the cat, dude! Aim for a cat!

Bill S. Preston: You totally killed us, you evil metal ****weeds!

Epstein: Why do you think I'm a homosexual? Eugene: I guess it's because you never talk about girls. Epstein: I never talk about dogs either. Does that make me a cocker spaniel?

Sgt. Toomey: You would need three promotions to be an asshole.

Deckard: I have had people walk out on me before, but not when I was being so charming.

Leon: Nothing is worse than having an itch you can never scratch!

Leon: Wake up! Time to die

Roy Batty: I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die.

There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works.

The personal computer market is about the same size as the total potato chip market. Next year it will be about half the size of the pet food market and is fast approaching the total worldwide sales of ***** hose. - James Finke, President, Commodore International Ltd. (1982)

Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing. - **** Brandon

A bad random number generator: 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 4.33e+67, 1, 1, 1

A bug in the code is worth two in the documentation.

A bug in the hand is better than one as yet undetected.

A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.

A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken.

A computer's attention span is only as long as its extension cord.

A fault tolerant system must report the faults even as it tolerates them.

A hacker does for love what others would not do for money. - Laura Creighton

A list is only as strong as its weakest link. - Don Knuth

A low level language is one whose programs require attention to the irrelevant.

A paperless office has about as much chance as a paperless bathroom.

A successful tool is used to do something undreamed of by its author. - Johnson

A)bort, R)etry or S)elf-destruct?

A)bort, R)etry, I)gnore, V)alium?

A)bort, R)etry, I)nfluence with large hammer.

AAAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse Anonymous

APATHY ERROR: Don't bother striking any key.

ASCII to ASCII, DOS to DOS.

Abstraction is achieved by data hiding and enforced by encapsulation.

Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later. - Brook

Advanced design: Upper management doesn't understand it.

After a number of decimal places, nobody gives a damn.

All computers run at the same speed...with the power off.

All the simple programs have been written, and all the good names taken.

All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

All you need to know is the user interface. - J. Redford

An algorithm must be seen to be believed. - D. E. Knuth

An elephant is a mouse with an operating system.

And on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.

Another megabytes the dust.

Any given program will expand to fill available memory.

Any nitwit can understand computers. Many do. - Ted Nelson

Any program that runs right is obsolete.

Any programming language is at its best before it is implemented and used.

Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature. - Kulawiec

Artificial Intelligence: Making computers behave like they do in the movies.

As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error. - Weisert

As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.

Asking if computers can think is like asking if submarines can swim.

Asking whether machines can think is like asking whether submarines can swim.

Avoid GOTOs completely if you can keep the program readable.

Avoid temporary variables and strange women.

Avoid the Fortran arithmetic IF (or better yet, just avoid Fortran).

Avoid unnecessary branches.

BASIC is to computer programming as QWERTY is to typing. - Seymour Papert

BREAKFAST.COM halted... cereal port not responding!

Backup not found! A)bort, R)etry or P)anic?

Backup not found: A)bort, R)etry, M)assive heart failure?

Bad command or file name. Go stand in the corner.

Bad style destroys an otherwise superb program.

Base 8 is just like base 10, if you are missing two fingers. - Tom Lehrer

Be careful when a loop exits to the same place from side and bottom.

Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers. - Leonard Brandwein

Brain fried; core dumped.

Breakthrough: It finally booted on the first try.

Breakthrough: It nearly booted on the first try.

C:\BELFRY is where I keep my .BAT files.

C:\GRAPHICS\GIF\NAUGHTY\FILTHY\DISGUSTING\WOW!

CCCP:> format CCCP: /u

CCITT - Can't Conceive Intelligent Thoughts Today

CChheecckk yyoouurr dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh..

Capt'n! The spellchecker kinna take this abuse!

Choose variable names that will not be confused.

Close your eyes and press escape three times.

Compatible: Gracefully accepts erroneous data from any source.

Computer Science: Solving today's problems tomorrow.

Computer and car salesmen differ in that the latter know when they are lying.

Computer possessed? Try DEVICE=C:\EXOR.SYS

Computer programmers do it byte by byte.

Computers are a more fun way to do the same work you'd have to do without them.

Computers are only human.

Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. - Gilb

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. - Pablo Picasso

Computers talk to each other worse than their designers do.

Computers... are not designed, as we are, for ambiguity. - Thomas

Congratulations! You are the one-millionth user to log into our system.

Controlling complexity is the essence of computer programming. - Kernigan

Customer: A primitive life form at the bottom of the food chain.

DYNAMIC LINKING ERROR: Your mistake is now everywhere.

Debugger: A tool that substitutes afterthought for forethought.

Design simplicity: It was developed on a shoe-string budget.

Design: The activity of preparing for a design review.

Diagnostics are the programs that run when nothing else will.

Disc space, the final frontier!

Disclaimer: Any errors in spelling, tact, or fact are transmission errors.

Do files get embarrassed when they get unzipped?

Do you like me for my brain or my baud?

Document code? Why do you think they call it "code?"

Don't comment or patch bad code; rewrite it.

Don't compare floating point numbers solely for equality.

Don't diddle code to make it faster; find a better algorithm.

Don't document the program; program the document.

Don't hit the keys so hard, it hurts.

Don't let the computer bugs bite!

Don't stop at one bug.

Dreams are free, but you get soaked on the connect time.

EBCDIC: Erase, Back up, Chew Disk, Ignite Card

E Pluribus UNIX.

Earth is 98% full...please delete anyone you can.

Emacs is a nice operating system, but I prefer UNIX. - Tom Christiansen