Streams

Nashville Bob

How do you get to Nashville's famed Bluebird Cafe, the launch pad of dozens of country music's biggest stars? If you're Bob Garfield - and you're trying to make it big in country music in less than 36 hours - "practice, practice" is not an option. Luckily, Bob has chutzpah, and a brilliant song, just waiting for a record exec to bite. Join Bob as he tries to pen the next country music hit.
You asked for it, you got it! A free, downloadable version of Bob's hit song "Tag You're It".... To start your download, just click here.

Transcript

BOB GARFIELD: This is On the Media. I'm Bob Garfield.

BROOKE GLADSTONE: And I'm Brooke Gladstone. Some years back, Bob had a speaking engagement in Nashville. Being an exquisitely sensitive person, he was seized by the vibrations emanating from the Grand Ol' Opry as well as visions of fortune and fame. This is what happened.

BOB GARFIELD: I was going to be in Nashville for a day and a half and my speaking gig wasn't going to tie me up for long, so I figured while I'm in town why not just write a hit country song and get it cut by a major recording star. I mean -- I am a writer. I live in a country. How hard could it be? [CLIP OF COUNTRY SONG PLAYS]

BOB GARFIELD: So I did what most aspiring musicians do as soon as they hit Nashville -- I found my way to the Bluebird Cafe. Open mic nights there have launched the careers of Garth Brooks, Vince Gill, Mary Chapin-Carpenter and more guitar-playing songwriters than you can shake a pick at. They duck in from the rain and sing about their pain -- (you might say if you were a professional songwriter, such as myself) -- displaying their charms for Opryland's waiting arms.

ASHLEY CLEVELAND: [SINGING] TENNESSEE-- TENNESSEE--

BOB GARFIELD: Singer/songwriter Ashley Cleveland was born and raised up just down the road a piece -- an advantage I don't have. I was born in Philadelphia and live in Washington. In other words -- I'm an outsider -- which suddenly struck me as a potential impediment to overnight fame and fortune. But just as I started fretting about possibly being too Washington for Nashville, who should I run into but former Governor Lamar Alexander who ran an entire presidential campaign bragging about being just the right amount of Nashville for Washington. Naturally, I asked him for advice.

BOB GARFIELD: My problem is I'm an inside-the-beltway kind of guy. I'm exactly what you ran against. Can I make it here in Nashville as an outsider any better than you made it in Washington that way?

LAMAR ALEXANDER: You, you've got to-- you've got to feel it. [LAUGHTER] But you can feel it from wherever you came from. [LAUGHS]

BOB GARFIELD: Even inside the beltway.

LAMAR ALEXANDER: You've got more to overcome than most people. [LAUGHTER]

BOB GARFIELD: Maybe he was looking at my blue blazer and penny loafers. But proprietor Amy Kurland told me to pay talk like that no mind. She's seen plenty of city slickers succeed and plenty of country boys with cowboy boots and big old hats squeezed by the business like a dip of snuff between your cheek and gum. All right, Miss Amy, I asked -- how do I mash that button of success? AMY KURLAND: Well something that -- creative that makes you different from the usual trite "come-into-my-arms-with-your-charms - I've got pain because - and I'm in the rain" -- you don't want to be saying that. You want to be a little more original than that. My fav--personal favorite them in country music is I'm a guy which makes me really dumb and now that my woman has pointed it out to me, I'm going to be better, and -- cause I really, really love her. That, that's a fine them in country music and one that sells all the time.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Honesty -- that's what it takes to write a country song. You've got to make yourself vulnerable and do it in a way in which you're telling the truth for people. Tell 'em what you really feel.

BOB GARFIELD: Meet Rivers Rutherford, an up and coming young songwriter who splits his time between Whistler's Music, [sp?] a sophisticated commercial music production house on Music Row, and MCA Music Nashville, one of the big song publishers in town. Rivers and I would write our hit song together. It turns out that hardly anyone writes alone in Nashville. They team up, swinging from partner to partner in a sort of literary square dance. This was particularly convenient for me inasmuch as I can neither sing nor play an instrument. Also in terms of the themes that pervade country music, Rivers' Memphis upbringing was sure to complement my very substantial experience with big business, government and Judaism -- or so I thought. Now Rivers is extremely talented and a very nice guy but frankly a little difficult to work with. We only had one day -- yet still he categorically rejected my first two ideas -one about falling in love with a lonesome cowgirl at a hearing of the House Judiciary Committee and the other about raising the younguns -- it had a catchy lyric-- PAPA DIDN'T RAISE YOU TO BE NO FOOL-- YOU'D BEST GET INTO A MAGNET SCHOOL. -- but Rivers didn't bite. And he was at best half-hearted in trying to put a melody to my song about those losers in the '83 Camaros who cut me off on the beltway because it's the only place on earth where they feel in control.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: [SINGING w/GUITAR] THERE YOU RUNNING ON THERE [...?...] RUNNING BEHIND FASTER YOU RUN THE LESS THAT YOU FIND BUT I THINK A BIG [...?...]'S THE VERY WORST KIND RUNNING, RUNNING, RUNNING AWAY FROM YOU.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: I gotta be honest with you -- I'm looking at the lyrics -- I think it's a little bit of a -you want to write a hit country song--

BOB GARFIELD: Yeah, and I'm running out of time.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Okay. [LAUGHS] Yeah, we are running out of time on that aren't we. This is probably not going to get you a number one song in the short amount of time you got. The best thing to do is find a simpler idea, I would say. [LAUGHS] You know what I'm saying?

BOB GARFIELD: Oh, I knew all right! He was feeling threatened by the new kid on the block, by my rare insight into human behavior, by my tenderness, by my stunning command of-- what do you call it -- you know -- words. And most of all, my capacity for plagiarizing Jackson Browne. Professional jealousy is never pretty so I just let him natter on.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Another slant on it would be to say basically that instead of running from these demons, what if the demon is just trying too hard or being too busy.

BOB GARFIELD: Okay, wait, wait, wait -- what about this-- everyone's so busy -- now they're running behind -- what if-- what if - you ever have a conversation with somebody you can't have because you're calling their voice mail and they're calling your voice mail--

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Right. Phone tag. [BOTH SPEAK AT ONCE]

BOB GARFIELD: -- and then you-- Phone tag - and you know at the end - by the end of it you're just saying tag, you're it, right?

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Okay.

BOB GARFIELD: So what if - what if there were a relationship building in an exchange of voice mail messages and the whole song was just this exchange of voice mail messages and the hook was Tag, You're It.

BOB GARFIELD: Well come to think of it, why not a song about telephone tag with your sweetheart? It's a common experience, harvested from my own life completely consistent with my inside-the-beltway sensibilities and just as the proprietor of the Bluebird Cafe suggested, it could be about a clueless guy who treats his woman wrong until she slaps him upside the head and gets him back on the road to love.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: [SINGING w/GUITAR] JUST CALLING TO LET YOU KNOW I GOT YOUR MESSAGE -- UM-- I GOT YOUR MESSAGE-- A WHILE AGO-- IN MY SUITCASE BY THE DOOR AND NOW-- SUITCASE IN MY HAND 6 O'CLOCK THIS MORNING I HADN'T TALKED TO YOU IN A COUPLE DAYS [...?...] CHECKING ALL MY CALLS-- 7 MESSAGES, YOURS WAS LAST OF ALL--

BOB GARFIELD: Yeah, I mean what - what if it tells a story -what story can we tell on the basis of two people who are just like-- electronic ships passing in the night? [LAUGHTER]

BOB GARFIELD: All told it took us about 6 hours, and I don't mind telling you I was dripping with satisfaction like gravy over hot biscuits. All we had to do now was play the song for his publisher, Jody Williams, president of MCA Music Nashville. Then it would be demo'd and then shopped to likely artists -- Garth Brooks, Willie Nelson, what have you -- and my career would be launched even as I boarded the 6:05 p.m. flight back to Washington. Rivers was a little less enthused than I was in the very narrow sense that he thought upon further reflection that a song about telephone tag was pretty stupid and unlikely ever to be recorded much less hit the charts. And Williams, before he sat down to hear the thing, was none too encouraging either.

JODY WILLIAMS: The numbers are against you tremendously in this business. A thousand songs a day get written in this town. Two percent of those songs get recorded. Not 10 percent. 2 percent. Sometimes it's, it's supposed to work like this -- the best song wins. It doesn't always work like that. There are politics involved. There are people doing people favors.

BOB GARFIELD: Politics? Favors?! For this I left Washington? Whatever happened to just being an artist and succeeding on your God-given talent? Tell you what, Jody -- I don't need any political connections to make it in this town. Just listen to the song. Just listen to Tag, You're It.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: [SINGING w/GUITAR] HELLO, I'M SORRY DARLIN/ I MISSED YOUR CALL AGAIN IF YOU'DA TRIED AT 10 TO 5 I MIGHT HAVE SQUEEZED YOU IN I REALLY WANT TO REACH YOU BUT TIME IS KIND OF TIGHT I LOVE YOU, HON BUT I GOTTA RUN, SO KISS THE KIDS GOODNIGHT TAG, YOU'RE IT CATCH ME IF YOU CAN I'D LOVE TO SAY I LOVE YOU BUT I'M SUCH A BUSY MAN I KNOW WE'LL REACH EACH OTHER IT'S JUST A QUESTION WHEN I'M CALLING YOU BUT I CAN'T GET THROUGH SO TRY ME BACK AGAIN IN REFERENCE TO YOUR VOICE MAIL AND GIRL I MISS YOU TOO YOU'RE QUITE CORRECT WE SHOULD CONNECT THE WAY WE USED TO DO I'LL TRY TO SHOW THAT I STILL KNOW WHAT LOVING REALLY MEANS LOOK FOR SOMETHING SPECIAL, HON ACROSS YOUR FAX MACHINE TAG, YOU'RE IT CATCH ME IF YOU CAN I'D LOVE TO SAY I LOVE YOU BUT I'M SUCH A BUSY MAN I KNOW WE'LL REACH EACH OTHER IT'S JUST A QUESTION WHEN I'M CALLING YOU BUT I CAN'T GET THROUGH SO TRY ME BACK AGAIN JUST TURNED MY COMPUTER ON FOUND THE E-MAIL THAT YOU SENT S.O.S. - I'M IN DISTRESS NEED ACKNOWLEDGMENT YOU SAID OUR SHIP WAS SINKING BUT THE METAPHOR AIN'T RIGHT CAUSE WE'RE NOT SHIPS JUST MICROCHIPS PASSING IN THE NIGHT TAG, THAT'S IT! [SEE ?] ME IF YOU CAN I'M HERE TO SAY I LOVE YOU AND I'M SUCH A FOOLISH MAN WE HAVEN'T TOUCHED EACH OTHER SINCE I DON'T REMEMBER WHEN HANG UP [...?...] COMING HOME [...?...] TAKE ME BACK AGAIN.

BOB GARFIELD: The president of MCA Music Nashville had just heard our song about telephone tag and for a moment he just sat there, quietly stunned.

JODY WILLIAMS: I've never heard that idea before.

BOB GARFIELD: Judging from the look in his eyes, I don't reckon he ever needed to hear it again. I was hoping for him to get a blank contract out, but instead he and Rivers went back and forth on how the song could be re-written.

JODY WILLIAMS: A guy who's just busy -- I mean have a mid-tempo song or have a ballad saying our, our lives are -- you know - this is ridiculous, you know? And start sympathizing with each other. I don't think it's-- [...?...] new hook cause Tag, You're It ain't gonna [...?...] at all.

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: Tag, You're It ain't gonna do it.

BOB GARFIELD: Ain't gonna do it?! TAG, THAT'S IT! BELIEVE ME IF YOU CAN IF I THOUGHT I WAS A SONGWRITER, I'M SUCH A FOOLISH MAN Just like that, my dreams of more than 30 hours were crushed. I guess Lamar was right after all.

ECHOES OF LAMAR ALEXANDER'S VOICE: You've got more to overcome than most people. [ECHOING LAUGHTER] You've got more to overcome than most people. [ECHOING LAUGHTER]

BOB GARFIELD: Later, as he was packing me off to the airport, Rivers spoke to me as if I were Dorothy and he were the Good Witch of the South. He could have told me that playing that song for Jody Williams would get me sent back to Washington -- but I had to find out for myself.

BOB GARFIELD: At what point did you just completely lose hope in this--?

RIVERS RUTHERFORD: I think the-- at the point when you said something about-- you know we could write a song about, about phone tag -- that's when the, the hope pretty much flew out of the window for me. [CLIP OF PATSY CLINE SINGING "CRAZY" PLAYS]

BOB GARFIELD: Yeah, Patsy -- I must have been out of my mind to think I could pull this off.

PATSY CLINE: [SINGING] CRAZY FOR FEELING SO BLUE--

BOB GARFIELD: I can't get a record cut any more than Reba McIntire can do a 5-part series on health care reform. But as I sat in my airplane set, dejected, I couldn't help but notice someone familiar sitting across the aisle. It was someone who knew not only the inside of the beltway but the epicenter -- the ultimate Washingtonian -- and yet someone equally rooted in the cultures and rhythms of the rural South. I traded seats with the Secret Service Agent next to him and asked Jimmy Carter about his taste in music.

JIMMY CARTER: Do I listen to a country music station? Well in Americus, Georgia and I listen to a whole gamut of country music.

BOB GARFIELD: Is it possible do you suppose to bring a Washington sensibility to country music?

JIMMY CARTER: I'd be amazed.

BOB GARFIELD: Okay, well then I just want to play this for you -- would you just listen to this?

JIMMY CARTER: Sure.

BOB GARFIELD: Okay, thanks.

BOB GARFIELD: Whereupon the former President of the United States strapped on my headphones and listened to my song, flashing his famous toothy grin and, if I'm not mistaken, tapping his toe securely beneath the seat in front of him.

BOB GARFIELD: So what do you think?

JIMMY CARTER: I think the song is good, and the music's good. I'd like to hear it every now and then on my country radio station, and-- you know you might get in touch with -- I'm not - I think the performer's very good but-- if somebody like Willie Nelson or Tom T. Hall is one of my best buddies-- I think they would like it and they could give you some good advice.

BOB GARFIELD: With your compliments?

JIMMY CARTER: Of course, sure!

BOB GARFIELD: I'll see you at the Country Music Awards, Mr. President.

WILLIE NELSON: [SINGING w/BAND & BACKUP VOCALS] HELLO, I'M SORRY DARLIN I MISSED YOUR CALL AGAIN IF YOU'DA TRIED AT 10 TO 5 MIGHT HAVE SQUEEZED YOU IN I REALLY WANT TO REACH YOU BUT TIME IS KIND OF TIGHT I LOVE YOU, HON BUT I GOTTA RUN, SO KISS THE KIDS GOODNIGHT TAG, YOU'RE IT CATCH ME IF YOU CAN I'D LOVE TO SAY I LOVE YOU BUT I'M SUCH A BUSY MAN I KNOW WE'LL REACH EACH OTHER IT'S JUST A QUESTION WHEN I'M CALLING YOU BUT I CAN'T GET THROUGH SO TRY ME BACK AGAIN IN REFERENCE TO YOUR VOICE MAIL AND GIRL I MISS YOU TOO YOU'RE QUITE CORRECT WE SHOULD CONNECT THE WAY WE USED TO DO I'LL TRY TO SHOW THAT I STILL KNOW WHAT LOVING REALLY MEANS LOOK FOR SOMETHING SPECIAL, HON ACROSS YOUR FAX MACHINE TAG, YOU'RE IT CATCH ME IF YOU CAN I'D LOVE TO SAY I LOVE YOU BUT I'M SUCH A BUSY MAN I KNOW WE'LL REACH EACH OTHER IT'S JUST A QUESTION WHEN I'M CALLING YOU BUT I CAN'T GET THROUGH SO TRY ME BACK AGAIN

WILLIE NELSON: Take it, boys! [INSTRUMENTAL]

BOB GARFIELD: That's it for this week's show. On the Media was directed by Katya Rogers and produced by Megan Ryan, Tony Field, Jamie York, and Mike Vuolo, and edited-- by Brooke. Dylan Keefe is our technical director, and Jennifer Munson our engineer. We had help from Anne Kosseff and Neil Rausch. Our webmaster is Amy Pearl.

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