As mentioned in a previous entry, metaphors serve to explain ideas without completely depending on language. The Bus Metaphor frequently used in Acceptance & Commitment Therapy describes the ways internal experiences (i.e., thoughts, emotions, urges, memories, etc.) seem to drive our lives. The metaphor asks us to consider a life in which such experiences do not determine our decisions, but instead sit in our minds as would passengers on a bus. Accordingly, the bus represents the mind and the passengers symbolize different internal experiences. You are the driver, who can exist separately from the content spewed out by the passengers. For instance, the driver can notice a passenger telling him he is ugly, but the driver does not necessarily have to believe the comment to be true.

As the driver, we make important decisions about the speed and direction of the bus; we generally have a sense of where we might like to go and the pace at which we might like to move. Simultaneously, passengers may express opinions loudly and aggressively, while others may sit back quietly. Some passengers may even behave frighteningly by running to the front of the bus and yelling directions at you.

Impatience may insist that you “HURRY UP!”

Fear may scream, “Turn here! Don’t go there!”

Self-Sabotage may yell, “Turn around! The bus will fail to get through those bumpy, unpaved roads.”

Depression may convince you to “pull over and stop driving for a while.”

Over time, you start mindlessly adhering to the passengers’ demands. For instance, upon meeting an individual with whom you might develop an intimate partnership, Worthlessness may remind you that “if you turn toward a new relationship, you’ll be rejected, so turn away.” Consequently, low self-worth may lead to mindless choices that end the relationship.

What often escapes our awareness is that these passengers (i.e., thoughts, feelings, memories, urges, bodily sensations, etc.) cannot actually touch you or the mechanics that move the bus. You are always the driver and they can only be passengers. The can say that “you’re stupid” or “you will fail,” but they cannot actually stop or redirect the bus. Their words may even bring you to tears or increase your heart rate. You may stop the bus and order the passengers to leave or you may turn around to argue with them. In the end, though, these efforts most often result in you moving nowhere so that you can engage with these troublemakers.

At different times in our lives, some of these passengers may be more forceful, persuasive, or imposing than others. Furthermore, when you are more vulnerable, these passengers may seem to directly impact the way you drive the bus. Loneliness may spot a mean, abusive ex-partner and advise you “it would feel so nice to have a co-pilot for this part of the drive.” At times, you may want only the “positive” passengers on the bus so that you can drive along with Hope telling you “it will all be okay.” That encouraging message, however, may cause an unexpected bump in the road to leave you blind-sighted.

The passengers naturally exist as residents of the bus. The problem does not lie in their presence, but instead in mindlessly believing in and abiding by their declarations and demands. The secret to managing the passengers is not to only listen to the “good” ones; instead, the trick is to acknowledge the content of all the passengers as merely part of the bus ride. Each passenger has a seat on the bus and will always convey their typical messages. No matter their volume or persistence, they will never drive the bus. Similarly, internal experiences (i.e., thoughts, feelings, urges, memories, etc.) can arise, and they do not have to determine the manner in which we behave.

Consider Joel, who forgot his mother’s birthday. As she expressed hurt feelings, he noticed the following old passengers:

Defensiveness: “Make an excuse! Better yet, blame her!”

Guilt: {showing Joel memories} “You are a terrible son.”

Avoidance: {creating an urge to end the call} “Hang up NOW!”

Anxiety: {paired with rapid heart rate} “You can’t handle this!”

Passengers such as Consideration, Honesty, and Accountability seem to take a back seat, yet they speak to Joel’s values more so than those louder and more imposing folks. As the bus driver, Joel acknowledges the reactions of Defensiveness, Guilt, Avoidance, and Anxiety, but also notes the opinions of the less vocal passengers:

Consideration:“Apologize and make it up to her.”

Honesty:“Acknowledge your mistake.”

Accountability:“Take responsibility for your actions.”

A bus driver can turn left at 20mph while screaming passengers insist he travel straight while moving at 80mph. Likewise, Joel can acknowledge the urge to hang up the phone and/or defend his mistake while deciding to act in accordance with values informed by Honesty, Accountability, and Consideration. Of course, the louder, older the passengers are the harder to ignore; however, it is not impossible to note the content of all passengers and make value-based decisions.

Follette and Pistorello (2007) perfectly describe the way we can use the bus metaphor to understand acceptance:

“Acceptance is about driving the bus yourself, turning right or left as you personally choose according to your values, with all your scary passengers along for the ride.” (p. 107)

Of course, action in the presence of conflicting messages can be difficult.A good first step involves identifying the passengers on your bus. Are they emotions, thoughts, memories, images, sayings, bodily reactions, etc.? To what extent do you believe their content and/or behave according to their demands. You could even reread this blog entry and notice if any passengers arise. The next step involves finds ways to recognize these passengers and create enough distance between you and their comments so that you can make decisions without only considering the loud, imposing messages.

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The content of this site is for informational purposes only and it is not intended to be and should not be used in place of the advice of your physician and/or other healthcare provider. Ross Psychology does not offer advice, nor should its contents be considered clinical advice. Should you have any healthcare related questions please contact your physician or other healthcare provider promptly.