Before 1492’s to-do kicked off the chain of events that led us to 7/4/1776, North America had already been settled and resettled by everyone from ancient land-bridge ambulators and mythical mound builders, to Norsemen seeking refuge out west from Christian persecution in Europe (and just a tiny wee bit of pillaging, here and there).

So, in honor of Uncle Sam’s 232nd birthday, here are five historic North American hotspots that bring this land’s pre-Columbus, pre-Puritan, pre-lots-of- other-stuff heritage.

(Note: We consider Vikings too awesome to actually be European, so save your arguing for someone who wants to hear it. Happy Fourth!)

1) BERING LAND BRIDGE NATIONAL PRESERVE, ALASKA

(Ice Age)

Then Geeks of varying disciplines get in slap fights all the time over the exact date, but whether it was 25,000 years ago, or a mere 12,000, be sure only

Larry King could have

witnessed the migration of Eastern Siberians to Alaska across the 55-mile-long, 1,000-mile-wide ice mass (sorry pontophiles, it wasn’t technically a bridge).

Now Most of said “bridge” is now a big puddle called the Bering Strait, but what little ice remains is protected in America’s hardest-to-reach national park, the Bering Land Bridge Preserve.

In the summer, visitors can only come by small plane or boat, but it’s worth it, especially for a visit to the therapeutic Serpentine Hot Springs.

Because you are in the middle of nowhere, don’t worry about someone trying to collect a toll.

INFO nps.gov/bela

2) POVERTY POINT, LOUISIANA

(2500-1000 BC)

Then Fun fact: A regulation pitcher’s mound is 18 feet in diameter, and rises no more than 10 inches off the ground. Funner fact: Prehistoric mounds built along the Mississippi River by ancient Indians were upwards of 69 feet high and over 1,000-miles long (they also took over 5 million man-hours to build!).

Academically known as “Earthwork,” these mounds were often shaped like their favorite animals.

Now This 400-acre state park includes 5 major mounds – one of which resembles a giant, flying bird. It costs $2 to get in; guided tram tours are offered daily.

INFO crt.state.la.us

3) THE IROQUOIS NATION, NEW YORK (1000 BC-present)

Then Long before the Iroquois and the French were trying really hard not to chuckle while fighting The Beaver Wars, the Five Nations pretty much had Upstate New York to

themselves, peacefully trading amongst one other, even devising constitutions, all without the, ahem, civilizing influence of

Europeans.

Now There’s always the Turning Stone casino resort in Verona, but higher roads lead to the Iroquois Museum in Howes Cave, right outside Cobleskill along I-88. Lots of carvings, baskets and crafts – both

historic and modern – and it’s only $8 wampum.

INFO iroquoismuseum.org

4) TEOTIHUACAN, MEXICO (200 BC-100 AD)

Then South of the border, Teotihuacan – about 25 miles northeast of what’s now Mexico City – was a melting pot of Aztecs, Totonacs, Mayans, Zapotecs, Mixtecs and Otomis.

It was around the start of the first millennium AD that Teotihuacan went development mad, throwing up pyramids faster than Dubai does movable skyscrapers today. You might recognize its tallest and most famous building – the Pyramid of the Sun.

Now Known today as the municipality San Juan

Teotihuacan, the ancient city, its ruins, pyramids and museum are a World Heritage Site (#414). Admission’s about $4 per head.

INFO whc.unesco.org

5) NEWFOUNDLAND (1000 AD)

Then Europe was getting a little too Jesus-y and claustrophobic for Scandinavia’s Vikings, so a couple of them got in their Drekkars and high-tailed it west, first discovering Iceland, then Greenland, then Vinland – aka North America.

(There’s evidence they even traveled as far south as Maine a half-millennium before Columbus bumped into America, but that’s a controversy for another day).

L’anse aux Meadows, on the northeast tip of

Newfoundland, is their first settlement on the continent.

Now Given that factoid, UNESCO turned L’anse aux Meadows into a World

Heritage Site in 1978.

The $11.60 entry fee might seem a little steep, but the pristine hiking trails and fully-costumed historical reenactments are worth the cost of upkeep.