Friday, May 21, 2010

I have been keeping my distance from the "non-boyfriend". Being sick was a good excuse. We may not be able to see one another for a few more weeks and maybe by that time we won't be talking at all. I don't know what my deal is and why I get bored of these guys so quickly. I guess it's because I know that it is not going anywhere. Clearly this "relationship" that I am carrying on with "non-boyfriend" is just that of the warm body type. I hate to admit it but that is what it is. He is sweet and kind but I don't think he is interested in anything else. Yeah I could keep him around but what's the point. Yeah, I can get my fix and all but that leaves me still too close to him. *sigh* I am just so sick of myself, I don't know what to do.

Monday, May 17, 2010

I don't think I am a very needy person but I do require a few things. If I call you, then call me back in a timely matter or at least have a decent excuse. Don't call me talk me for 2 minutes, tell me you are going to call back and then take 4 hours before you do, only so that we can start the same thing over again. I know he is tired and I respect his sleeping schedule and I never intrude on time with his kids though there are times I am on the phone when he is with them. He is really getting on my nerves though and the fact that I have been sick doesn't help. Then he trips when I don't answer his calls or when he IMs me. I just tell him my phone was charging which is the case sometimes or that I was sleeping. I don't know, maybe I am getting bored and need a new play thing. I hate to kick him to the curb but our schedules are not working. I know I could call him now if he is not at a busy post but my ass is ready for bed. I guuess we will see in time. But then again time is not on his side. Summer is here and it's time to mingle.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Ok the guy that I have been seeing is great, I don't think I can say it enough. Though I for some unforeseen reason feel like I am getting bored. I was fine not having anything define what we were, but part of me wants something more. It seems that he has kicked any extras to the curb to be with me since he spends his off days with me and when he is not talking to me on the phone, he is sleeping or at work, but who really knows. I think I am wanting more and I am not sure if he is the guy that can give me that more, especially since he is saying he doesn't want anymore children and I don't want to lose my chance if I decide I do.
I had a chat with one of my best friends today and she reminded me that marriage and relationships are hard. She said that she is met with temptation everyday and has to really remind herself. She said that it's a tedious job and she finds herself wondering why she got married. She loves her husband and has no want to cheat or to leave but some parts of being single never go away. We are all human and look but have to remember not to touch.