Friday, May 20, 2016

I feel the need to be a little more forthright. A few posts ago, I mentioned how I have some goals for the near future. But I didn't go into detail. How can I ever accomplish them, if I can't even admit them and talk about them. So I will share.I told Jesse that I would move for him, if we started a relationship. He's in Taiwan. I'm in California, Silicon Valley, where I grew up and have lived basically my whole life, and everyone I know is here.If I start something with Jesse and move to Taiwan, then I will want to leave everything important to me here, on a good note. It's really, really important to me that I end this chapter of my life well.I want to have a good, stable relationship with all of my immediate family members. My mom, dad, and sister.I want to have peaceful and meaningful relationships with my extended family members, the degree of that depending on who that person is.I want to be on good terms with my other friends in the bay area.I want to enjoy being part of the communities/groups that I have been involving myself in this past year: my church community on Sundays and young adult fellowship on Thursday. These communities are not very established for me, but I want to leave feeling like I enjoyed them and felt integrated.I want to leave my job on a good note. I want to feel at peace with my relationship with all my coworkers, feel like I did my job adequately, not get assigned too many new tasks, and enjoy my job.All of these things I would probably be working on regardless of whether I move away or not, but it becomes that much more important to me when I anticipate moving away.I feel/think I can accomplish these goals, or that I have a good chance of accomplishing them. I just have to remind myself that these are subjective goals and not to be too rigid about expecting perfection here. I hate my tendency to be so rigid about everything. It is my Achilles' heel.