This blog was started as a story about my journey on the road to recovery from bulimia on to the healthy lifestyle that I have always wanted. I utilize running, exercise and balanced eating to create my healthiest self. Follow along as I complete my Fourth Year of abstinence from purging and train for my second marathon.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Sometimes You Just Have A BAD Run!

Hi There! Happy Wednesday!

I totally thought I posted this on Monday... but didnt :/

I've been THAT out of it this week.

Are you adjusting to daylight savings time? (NO!) Do you miss that extra hour? (YES!) Do you wish that we stayed with longer daylight all year round (YES!)

This time of year is always bittersweet for me. I hate losing an hour, but I love gaining the fact that there is still light out on my drive home at 5:30pm. It's not too hard of an adjustment for me past the first day because I'm up before the sun regardless, but I know it messes with a lot of people. If you're one of them, I'm sorry. Be gentle and remember "This too shall pass!"

I was fairly quiet last week, and was way too exhausted this weekend to post. I did my long run on Saturday this week instead of Sunday (in order to beat the time change and the heat)... but it seems I failed miserably at both attempts.

I had 11 miles on the calendar and set out to crush them with excellence... I feel a little short.

My first two miles, I was battling some GI issues. I went TWICE before leaving my grandparents house and still felt like I needed to stop and use the restroom near the golf course at mile 2. I stopped, no poo, and got back out there. Thankfully that subsided and my middle 7 miles were excellent. Then the bonk came for the last 2 miles. By that time the sun was out in full force and I was not. I really struggled to get those last 2 miles done and my time dwindled and dwindled. I actually almost stopped right at mile 11, but I was SO close to the finish (my grandmas block) that I out loud pushed myself to keep running.

HARDEST RUN EVER!!! Total of 11.15 miles at an 8:37 pace.

I had a really hard time getting out of my own head and not beating myself up for the rest of the weekend.

How am I suppose to run 12 miles next week and then run a race the weekend after? If I feel this bad at 11 miles, how will I EVER be able to make it to 26.2 again? So much fear, doubt and just plain rudeness I placed on myself instead of just reminding myself that sometimes bad runs just happen. In fact, they happen more often than not.

I was reading the most recent post by Tina Muir on her website about struggling through runs and it said this:

"...We know that running brings up and downs, and we
know that the more downs there are, the better the ups feel. It is
moments like that really determine how much you want it, how well you
are going to do in the future. It is not the moments where everything is
going well that make you run fast and achieve those big goals, it is
the moment where you are truly tested, where every fiber in your being
wants to quit, but you do not."

In short, they cant all be winners, and they cant all be perfect. THESE are the runs where we learn the most about ourselves and about our runs.These are the runs that make us stronger and better at what we do.

SO what did this run teach me?

1. I don't do well in heat. Starting earlier will always be best for me. Those extra 30 minutes of lying in bed just are not worth it.

2. I may need to change my pre-run fuel. My tried and true banana and peanut butter may be whats giving me these more frequent GI issues. I'm going to try switching to oatmeal this weekend and see how its goes.

3.I can run for 11 miles in "normal" running shorts and not die! This was a big one for me. I knew it was hot out and compression shorts didn't sound good at all. So, I took a chance and ran with my regular running shorts. A few years ago I would have never even walked out of my house with shorts like those on because I hated my thighs and assumed that everyone else around me would hate them too! Then, even when I had more confidence in myself and my body I still feared that running that long with shorts would cause major irritation in my thighs. I am happy to report that I had NO chafing, NO irritation, and that I don't think I even worried ONCE about whether or not people saw my thighs jiggle. In fact... I purchased 2 more pair of shorts to parade around in this spring/summer because it felt so good to run in them!

4. Just Don't Give Up. Its not an option (in this case). Either way you have to make it back home and walking will only make it worse.

5. Mantras are Important. When I wanted to give up so bad I just kept repeating, "You're still moving, keep running, You're almost there." This really helped me push through those tough times. I will be saving that one for the books.