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Statue of Liability

Talking on a plane

The following is supposedly a true story relating to an actual event that took place during a flight.

As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system.

"Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep."

From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"

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An accident

Two men got out of their cars after they collided at an intersection. One took a flask from his pocket and said to the other, "Here, maybe you'd like a nip to calm your nerves." "Thanks," he said, and took a long pull from the container. "Here, you have one, too," he added, handing back the whiskey. "Well, I'd rather not," said the first. "At least not until after the police have been here."

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Alligators in Florida

A tourist was being led through the swamps
of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an alligator won't attack you
if you carry a flashlight?"
"That depends," replied the guide, "on
how fast you carry it."

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Business trip

One of the airlines recently introduced
a special half-fare rate for wives accompanying their husbands on business
trips. Anticipating some valuable testimonials, the publicity department
of the airline sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who used
the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip.
Responses are still pouring in from angry
wives asking: "What trip?"

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Clinton on vacation

Last summer, the President and
Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas. On a
venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car
with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's
high school love.

They exchanged hellos, and went on their way.

As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around
Hillary and said, "Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you would
be the wife of a service station owner today."

She smirked and replied, "No, if I had stayed with him, he would be President of the United States."