So I had a job interview today. I don't want my current employer finding out, but then again, nobody reads this so I think I'll be okay. I could reveal national secrets for all it matters. Actually, are you ready? Dick Cheney is a robot. Sorry, you're right, I did say 'secrets'.

Well, it was only a first interview, which doesn't really count. All that happens at the first interview is they check to make sure you can actually tie your shoes.

"Are your shoes tied? No, wait, you just used bread ties. Nice try; maybe you'll do well in management."

Why do employers even bother with interviews anymore? It's all just a pack of lies. I lie to them about how awesome I am, they lie to me about their workplace. "Come work here! Our interns are actually just pinatas made out of candy!" What a bunch of crap. I only saw one intern pinata, and it was the really cheap candy.

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I've been called "our generation's only sexy renaissance man" by Newsweek (which is why I subscribe to TIME). I read a lot. Virtually anything about science. Lately, I'm not so much of a fiction guy. I like to know a little about a lot of things.