BJ Shea

BJ Shea

BJ'S BLOG 09/20/13 "Those Noisy Seahawks"

by BJ Shea,posted Sep 20 2013 7:25AM

We’re going to have some Quiet Time during this particular blog entry, America. Inside voices only, raise your hand if you’d like to speak, and no horseplay. We’ve had a few complaints about all the noise.

The San Francisco Gate recently published a letter to the editor, written by “Judy and Rich”, that was truly over-the-top in its criticism of the Seattle Seahawks and their fans during home games. The authors were “’appalled” by the noise that Seattle fans like to generate, and even went so far as to compare the effects of yelling and chanting to steroid juicing.

That’s right: Judy and Rich believe that the sound of supportive fans created an unfair advantage for the Seahawks, to the extent that even the good judgment of the referees was affected!

Never fear, though. These two scientific geniuses proposed an easy fix to such an obvious problem: Give visiting teams the right to stop a game if crowd noise surpasses a set decibel level, and penalize the home team if it happens multiple times. The “penalty” they suggest? Revoking home field games for the rest of the season!

Dear Judy and Rich,

We apologize for any stress that our love of football may have caused you. If you ever return to a Seahawks home game, we hope you’ll accept a gift basket containing two pairs of noise-canceling headphones, a his-and-hers knitting set, two cups of warm milk, and specialty pillows designed to help ease the pain of being a sore loser.