The iPhone doesn’t make coffee. It can’t print photos. It doesn’t read VHS tapes. And it doesn’t come in “every color that exists.” But the xPhone, currently all the rage on YouTube, is all of those things. Could this new product from Germany literally nuke the iPhone into nonexistence?

(And yes, that’s actual German, mostly just narrating what you’re seeing on the screen – except for the bit about the colors.)

The entirely imaginary xPhone was a graduation project for Martin Fischer, a 25-year-old computer graphics designer in Germany. He hacked the video together in three days, and told Gearlog that he had a lot of ideas for features that never made it into the video. No, it isn’t a real phone. But it will sell as many units as the Apple Tablet will this year.

Also purely imaginary is the Pomegranate Phone, last year’s fabulous iPhone killer. The Pomegranate Phone, part of a somewhat inexplicable ad campaign for the Canadian province of Nova Scotia, made coffee and acted as an electric shaver. In fact, I feel a chart coming on …