Wednesday, January 22, 2014

This Just In: A Highly Translucent Excuse!

In all, it's really not that big a deal, but nevertheless I'll use it as an excuse by saying that the storm has exacerbated certain scheduling vicissitudes necessitating my offering you today only this highly truncated post, but that tomorrow I will return with a regular update of normal robustness.

That wind is really blowing a foul air into Manhattan from up north in Athol, NY. We could control all this with some climate control funding from Donald Trump, the high-tech "Trump -Plug™" could be the winter saviour of New York.A great man, he has offered all the city homeless to curl up and sleep in his hairpiece through the cold night.

Hey, Euro:We take ten minute showers, leave the tap running while we shave and brush teeth. Way too much water here. Time for you folks out west to start looking for property east of the Mississippi. And bring us some legal weed.

The stain in drain is done in vain by my vein. I have a Fathead of Babble in my shower with the hot snd cold knobs where her boobs are. I am kidding of course, if I had a Babble Fathead she would be facing the other way.

I don't think that pedestrian light setup is adequate at all. It makes the pedestrian look more like a cyclist to a driver, which increases the danger. Instead I recommend a backpack with a car battery in it, which powers a shoulder-mounted police-car light bar, and also has a standard ambulance siren in it. I want all traffic in a one-block radius frozen to the curb when I cross the road. And a good double-barreled shotgun for backup.

that video would be funny if it weren't true. Need more videos like that and just outright complaining to get the city to crack down on motorists (not pedestrians) and stop the carnage. Where are our friends at Transportation Alternatives?

If it [snows], take the [don't-do-shit-]bus? Pretty woosie. You commute in your undies through a heated dwelling. Whaddya, have "other people" in your life or some shit? That's a definite no-no for an artiste.

Anyway I bypassed the video at first... why didn't you tell me it was such an awesome satire? You got to call that shit out!

I WILL be registering a complaint regarding these issues, and demanding a refund.

Anywhoo that garb (and its magic ability to correct driver shittiness) is now mandatory if you're visiting a Dunkin Donuts.

Yeah, I was pretty miffed about the video too, until I got to the end and they specified that it was a satire.

The really sad part is, with all of the [cock] 'tips' the NYPD has been handing pedestrians and bicyclists alike, it was totally believable as a public service announcement. Because the real announcements are Just. That. Stupid.

SNOB, Show some cajones. No double dipping on the podium. And that goes for #'s 3 & 4 today because if 1 & 2 were only 1 then 3 would be 2 and 4 would be 3. Think McFly, err, Snob, or do you need a pedestrian flier?

These NYC cops are simple minded. Or one-track minded. To much cars and to much car thinking. The police should go walking and cycling in stead of driving their cars. Makes them meet the people on the street and makes them see the other (non safe) side of traffic.

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!