الثلاثاء، أغسطس 05، 2008

BO of War

Confessing to a

Hate Crime

OK, I have to confess to a hate crime. I hate mosquitoes. In fact, not only do I hate mosquitoes. I loathe mosquitoes, flies, ticks, bugs, flees and all blood-sucking insects. I do not mind ants or spiders, simply because they are not vampires. I hate mosquitoes so much, I remember that I once spent an entire vacation in a hotel in Sukhna fighting mosquitoes all night. The death toll was in the hundreds. But on that vacation, I made a significant discovery about my enemy.

I have made a discovery about mosquitoes. I have no idea why mosquitoes prefer my blood type more than anyone else I have ever met. I will be in a large gathering of people, and I am always the one to get most of the bites and swells. And once I start feeling them, and start going after them, mosquitoes disappear from the radar. I have discovered that mosquitoes disappear when they "feel" that I am chasing them.

Seriously, mosquitoes only attack me when I am numb busy doing other things. As soon as I become alert it seems my body sends out a certain odor, probably a WAR odor, supposedly some smell which should warn other animals that I am serious coming after them but unfortunately mosquitoes use this as an early warning and they totally disappear.

When and why did mother nature cause mosquitoes to develop these early warning systems? Evolution. Sometimes you gotta admit it sucks. Viruses, bacteria, insects and pests have gone through evolution like all living beings and only the best stayed with us. Only the ones which went through the tricky paths of evolution managed to make it and survive. The dumb ones had to go. So, it is official. Whenever I am chasing mosquitoes, my body gives out some odor which can be used as an insect-repellent! But of course I can not spend all my life chasing mosquitoes, although I have spend many nights using the "mechanical" resistance techniques. But eventually, I have to go back to writing, watching the night movies or whatever it is which sends me into a relaxed mood, which seems to invite mosquitoes back to land on my skin and act Dracula on me. Have you actually noticed this happening to you too? I guess biologists have to do some research on my War BO possibly to come up with a powerful repellent.

But meanwhile, here I am, having to sniff some other odor, of an electrically-heated repellent which probably causes asthma and possibly lung cancer.