Wednesday, January 02, 2013

The Thread of Chessed

by Rabbi Pinchos Lipschutz

The sefer of Shemos, which we begin this week, is often
referred to as the Sefer Hageulah, because it charts the course of our
nation from the bitterness of bondage through the thrill of redemption. SeferShemos traces our progress from the lowest depths to the greatest
heights, from the harrowing dangers of drowning in the Red Sea to the climax of
creation at Har Sinai.

After scaling the heights of Sinai, we quickly sunk back to the depths of
idol worship with the Eigel. We did teshuvah for that shameful
incident and Hakadosh Boruch Hu gifted us with an earthly home, a dirah
betachtonim. The promise of “veshochanti besocham” was realized and
a new level of holiness was created with the construction of the Mishkon.

A common thread of middas hachessed is evident in the Shemosparshiyos of shibud, geulah, Matan Torah, cheit and teshuvah. The
concept of olam chessed yiboneh, the force of kindness and compassion
rebuilding the world, is a common theme throughout SeferShemos.
Just as the world was brought about and created with the Divine middah
of chessed, it is that middah which enables us to conquer the
impediments that hinder our growth and existence.

Moshe Rabbeinu was sent by Hashem to rescue the Jewish people from
bondage. The Medrash (Shemos Rabbah 3:16) relates that Moshe
hesitated to accept the Divine call. He feared that his brother, Aharon, would
be insulted and hurt by his selection for the mission. It was only after Hashem
promised him that Aharon would be comfortable with his own advancement that he
agreed to return to Mitzrayim and lead the Jews out of their misery.

Moshe was the Divine messenger to lead the Jews out of Mitzrayim. Rav
Elozor Menachem Shach would teach from here that despite the Jews’ terrible
situation in which physical abilities were taxed to the limit on a daily basis
- they suffered every type of deprivation, their children were being
systematically killed, and they were sinking fast - Moshe was concerned about
one person’s feelings. He wouldn’t proceed with the mission of saving them
until he was assured that the person wouldn’t be insulted.

This idea can be understood further when we consider the Medrash
which states that the deliverance of the Bnei Yisroel was timed to the
minute. Had they remained in Mitzrayim any longer, they would have sunk to the
lowest possible level of tumah and would not have merited redemption.
Though he must have known how precious every minute was, Moshe hesitated lest
Aharon take offense.

This was because Moshe understood that no good can come from an action
that causes pain to another person. He knew that as important as the mission he
was being sent on was, if through his actions Aharon would be hurt, he could
not succeed.

Under the surface of this story lies an enduring truth: The geulah
was builtandthe way our people survived the darkest hours was
through chessed and empathy. When there was no food and no light,
they subsisted on the nourishment of strong relationships with each other.

• • • • •

Shortly after Rav Yitzchok Zev Soloveitchik was appointed rov of
Brisk, the townspeople approached him and said that they had misgivings about
the town’s shochet. They wanted him replaced. The young rov called a
meeting of the important people in town but insisted that the shochet
not be told about the meeting so he should not attend. Somehow, the shochet found
out about the meeting and showed up, taking a seat alongside the concerned
citizens of Brisk.

The rov called the meeting to order and talked about various
topics. Every time someone attempted to introduce the issue over which the
meeting had been called, the rov steered the conversation in another
direction. The people didn’t know what had come over their new rabbi, but they
eventually figured out that he was not going to address the problem and they
gave up.

The relieved shochet breathed a sigh of relief and left for home
with a slight smile on his lips. Finally, after he was gone, the rov
called those remaining in the room together and explained to them that he did
not want to do anything that would cause embarrassment to the shochet. That
was why he didn’t want the shochet at the meeting in the first place and that
was why he didn’t permit the topic to be raised.

Whatever problem there was with the shochet could be
taken care of later, he said, but if the man’s feelings would be hurt, no good
would come of their plans. Nothing good is derived from something that causes
unnecessary pain to another person, he said.

Chassidim tell a similar tale. The story goes that Rav Simcha Bunim
of Peshischa once said that he believed that with his avodah he could
bring Moshiach. He said that he didn’t pursue it, because if Moshiach
would come through his actions, people would ask who brought him and word would
get out that it was “Binem’s doing.” He said that the tzaddik hador, Rav
Meir of Apt, would hear the talk in the street and would be pained that he
wasn’t able to bring about the same result. Rav Simcha Bunim concluded that
since he didn’t want to cause pain to Rav Meir, he would forego bringing
the geulah.

Whether the story is true is anyone’s guess, but the lesson certainly is.
No cause is great enough to warrant the embarrassment of another person.

• • • • •

Even before Moshe Rabbeinu was born, his mother and sister, Shifra and
Puah, made a career out of caring about others and extending kindness toward
other human beings. The Torah says that in reward of their kindness, “Vayaas
lohem botim,” they were blessed with institutions of Kehunah, Leviyah and
Malchus.

The savior of the Jewish people was placed in a bassinet and saved through
acts of kindness by Basya, the daughter of Paroh. The Torah recounts that she
called him Moshe, stating, “ki min hamayim meshisihu - because I plucked
him from death in the water.”

The Maharal (Gevuros Hashem 18) teaches that of the many
names that were given to Moshe, he is eternally known by the one Basya gave
him, since it reflects her act of kindness. The Torah is all about pleasantness
and all its paths are peaceful. It is a Toras Chessed and, therefore,
everyone, including Hashem, refers to Moshe by the name given to him by the
daughter of Paroh, who performed an act of chessed in saving the infant
from death among the reeds.

The Torah reports concerning Moshe (Shemos 2, 11), “Vayigdal
hayeled - And the youth grew bigger.” What was the catalyst of his growth?
The posuk continues: “he went out to his brothers and saw their
suffering.” The young man who was growing up as a prince left the king’s palace
to walk among the slaves and experience the cold, the privation and the
oppression, so that it would be palpable and remain with him even after he
returned to the privileged confines of the citadel of wealth.

When he saw a Yid being harassed by a Mitzri, he reacted
quickly and forcefully, refusing to accept it. When he saw a Jew raise his hand
against a fellow Jew and then heard the Jew’s response to his rebuke, he cried
out, “achein noda hadovor.” He was proclaiming that geulah results
when Jews join together. It is a product of everyone being connected b’achdus.
If there is division, peirud, pettiness and political games, he was
telling them, we will remain in golus.

Moshe escaped to Midyon where the first act he performed there was also
one of chesed. He was at a well and when he saw that some shepherd girls
were chased from watering their flock at the well, he performed that duty for
them. His act of kindness to strange girls and their sheep led to him finding a
mate for himself and beginning a family of his own.

The parshiyos and their lessons are timeless. Into each golus
and subsequent geulah, the teachings accompanied us, instructing and
providing insight into the minds of our oppressors. The storyline is always the
same. Chesed, kindness, plays an integral part.

Yes, just as back then, our initial arrival is greeted with joy. The
nations around us are well aware of the gifts we bring; intelligence, ability
and creativity. Then the initial welcome gives way to jealousy and fear. They
utilize the means available to civilized people, who would never use force to
compel us to adjust and assimilate. There is always the force of the law. They
seek to intimidate and stop us through the enactment of legislation and rules
which they declare with feigned innocence. They don’t threaten or shout at us.
They smile, they shake our hands, and they subtly encroach on our spiritual
territory. There are always those who smile along, assuring the rest of us that
our hosts mean no harm, but there are the prophets of doom who sense the
direction in which everything is leading. People wish they would keep their
pessimistic messages to themselves, but they feel they have no choice but to
share their insights and predictions with everyone in a bid to fight back and
preserve our nation.

In Mitzrayim, Paroh feared our growth and demagogued that we weren’t a
patriot group. He urged his countrymen to “nip us in the bud,” proclaiming, “Pen
yirbeh,” our growth is an existential threat which must be dealt with
forthrightly. And just as then, at the beginning of golus Mitzrayim, so
too in our day, the same fear and the same marching song of “pen yirbeh”
is played.

We are also in golus, with our keepers plotting against us. Anyone
who thinks that metztizah b’peh isn’t relevant to him is choosing the
bliss of ignorance over the harshness of reality. Anyone following the saga
since it originally presented itself a few years back as an allegation against
a mohel from Monsey up until and including the recent court case can
clearly discern that their goal is not metzitzah. The goal and endgame
is brismilah and all that it represents. The bond between man
and his Maker, sealed in flesh, represents a proclamation that we live for a
higher cause and purpose whose rules weren’t crafted by power-hungry
politicians.

It behooves us to study the force that carried the Yidden through
Mitzrayim and the middah which accompanied them as they left, so that we
can incorporate it into our lives and merit to build a new world in the spirit
of olam chessed yiboneh.

In Israel, where our hosts are bneiAvrohom Yitzchok v’Yaakov,
we are being attacked the same insidious way. Our old friend, Binyomin
Netanyahu, created an alliance with a notoriously corrupt politician, whose
inbred hatred of religion from his Russian homeland leads him to disparage
religious people. The prime minister felt that his merger would gain him enough
votes in the upcoming election that he would not be beholden to religious
partiesin his next government.

Seeking to minimize the obligation to tend to the needs of frum Yidden,
Netanyahu said that the Shas party will not get the ministries it has headed
for many years. He has also assured voters of his commitment to drafting yeshiva
bochurim. Not content with only going after the chareidim, he also
attacked the leader of the settler party, which boomeranged on Mr. Netanyahu
and led to a rise in the polls for the party to his right.

Here in New York and there in Yerushalayim, we hear echoes of the age-old
Mitzri worry - “penyirbeh” - and their solution: “Hava
nischakmah lo. Let’s outsmart them and crimp their way of life.”

They forget that throughout the ages, all who echoed the Mitzri’s call
lost and faded away. We are survivors.

If we accept the recent rash of violence between brothers, then we are in
trouble. If the fact that yodayim shel Eisav have reached into our camp
doesn’t disturb us, then there are few solutions. But if we stand tall, remind
ourselves who we are and what we stand for, and grab hold of our neighbor’s
hands and work together, then we can succeed in building a brighter future.

We need to follow the example of Moshe Rabbeinu. When offered the
leadership of his people and a chance to lead them to the Promised Land, his
first consideration was the feelings of another Yid. Our leaders
throughout the ages have displayed similar conduct and sensitivity, and so must
we.

One of the most successful people in modern history at fulfilling Chazal’s
dictum to seek out learned sons-in-law was Rav Shraga Feivel Frank, a
businessman who lived in a Kovna suburb. An intimate of Rav Yisroel Salanter,
he passed away at a young age, r”l, and charged his wife with the task
of finding suitable mates for their daughters.

When it came time to marry off their oldest daughter, she traveled to
Volozhin and asked the Netziv to identify for her the best bochur in the
Volozhiner Yeshiva. He suggested two bochurim, Isser Zalman Meltzer and
Moshe Mordechai Epstein. She couldn’t decide between them, so she asked her
brother-in-law to help her out. He met and farhered both of them and
also couldn’t choose one over the other. The four of them traveled to Kovna,
where she asked the rashkebehag, Rav Yitzchok Elchonon Spector, to
determine which bochur would best fulfill her husband’s dying wish.

According to legend, Rav Yitzchok Elchonon asked Mrs. Frank if she had
more than one daughter. When she told him that she had four, he told her to
take both. The rest is history.

The biographies of both these gedolim report that when Rav Yitzchok
Rabinowitz left Slabodka to take up a rabbinic position, the Alter of Slabodka
offered the two brilliant brothers-in-law to replace him as rosh yeshiva.

Yerushalayimer talmidim of Rav Isser Zalman would say that, initially, the Alter
offered the position to Rav Isser Zalman, and he accepted only on the condition
that Rav Moshe Mordechai be offered to serve alongside him. Rav Isser Zalman’s talmidim
explained that their rebbi feared that if he were to accept the post
himself, there would inevitably be those who would remember the original
“contest” to determine which of the two was the greater talmid chochom
with the most potential. They would see the appointment as a determination that
Rav Isser Zalman was the better man. He refused to accept the higher calling
unless he could ensure that another Yid wouldn’t be hurt by it.

It is not as if anyone would have accused Rav Moshe Mordechai of being
weak in any area. He was renowned as an illui, versant in the entire Shas.
He would review Mishnayos every month, and the entire Shas and Shulchan
Aruch Yoreah Deah and Choshen Mishpot every year. Even in his old
age he would study 40-50 blatt of gemara daily. Yet Rav Isser
Zalman was worried lest some reach the wrong conclusion and cause Rav Moshe
Mordechai pain.

This sensitivity would define Rav Isser Zalman Meltzer and so many of our
leaders throughout the ages. They possessed refined character and sterling middos
combined with Talmudic brilliance, gaonus and penetrating lomdus.

As we work to get out of this golus, we have to promote and revere
leaders who care about others, about the yechidim, the quiet and weak
ones. There are so many people,causes and parties allied against us. We need to
permit the brightest and the best to rise to the top and engage the enemy.

We need to live lives of sensitivity, realizing that our Torah is Toras
Moshe, a legacy of the kind, compassionate shepherd who was also our rebbi,
and teach and learn it in a way that builds people up, leaving them feeling
good.

We need to bear in mind that the Torah is a Toras Chessed.
Greatness means being aware of others, seeing not only the forests but the
trees, not only the klal but every individual in the klal. It
means to care about the most prone and weak people among us. Trying to help
people find shiduchim, befriending the lonely, and supporting those
going through difficult periods in their lives. It means giving young people a
chance to right their lives and help to place them on the proper path and not
condemning them to a life of misfortune.

Reb Chaim Yitzchok Cohen was approached with a request one year before Purim.
“I know that you enjoy a close relationship with Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach,”
his friend said to him. “As you’ve probably heard, my daughter recently broke
her engagement; she is extremely depressed and in need of chizuk. When
you go to bring mishloach manos to Rav Shlomo Zalman, can you take my
daughter with you and ask him to give her a brochah?”

Later in the day, Reb Chaim Yitzchok went with the girl to Rav Shlomo
Zalman’s Shaarei Chessed walkup. As he entered the humble apartment, he saw
that it was filled with family, talmidim and neighbors. Rav Shlomo
Zalman was seated at the head of a crowded table, saying divrei Torah.
Rav Chaim Yitzchok walked over to him and told him about the girl. He said that
she was waiting at the front door and asked if he could bring her in for a brochah.

Rav Shlomo Zalman immediately rose from his seat and made his way out of
the crowded room, motioning for the girl to come inside. He then went into a
side room with her and Rabbi Cohen. He began to speak with the girl, offering
words of encouragement and hope, and a brochah for her to find a
wonderful chosson. The girl was profoundly moved by the encounter and stood
there weeping profusely. When the gaon was done showering her with
blessings, Rav Chaim Yitzchok accompanied him back into the main room. He had
only one question: “Why did the rov have to go into a side room for
that?”

Rav Shlomo Zalman looked surprised. “I imagined that, as she is in a
sensitive, vulnerable state, she would probably begin to cry when I gave her a brochah,”
he said. “Has she not received enough bizyonos already? Must she also
cry in front of a room filled with people?”

This is the sensitivity demonstrated by great people, which we must
emulate and incorporate into our everyday lives. By living with such focus and
compassion, we will, G-d willing, trigger Heavenly mercy and bring about the geulah
for which we are all waiting.

Chazal tell us that when the Mitzriyim plotted against us, saying “pen
yirbeh,” perhaps the Bnei Yisroel would increase; the Divine voice
responded with a promise, “kein yirbeh,” they most definitely will
increase.

May the zechus of our chessed and achdus earn us that
same Divine response; and announce once again “kein yirbeh,” continued
growth and prosperity, leading us to the redemption.