Adjustment Issues

Recently I have felt that DH has been distant. We are normally very open about whatever may be bothering us. Originally, I thought it must be because of me being hormonal and moody. However, today I come home after several days of visiting a relative and still he is in the same mood. I brought back a baby swing that a friend sold me for a great price. After some prodding, because it was driving me insane,he tells me he is having a hard time adjusting to the whole baby thing. We only have 15 more weeks! Not to sound selfish but I can't go through the last part of this feeling alone and unsupported. I work a full time job, a part time job, and am finishing another degree. I asked what I could do to help and all he said was quit bringing baby stuff in the house. I am at a loss. It is our first child and I am overwhelmed too but excited. Anyone have any suggestions or have encounterd this before?

Recently I have felt that DH has been distant. We are normally very open about whatever may be bothering us. Originally, I thought it must be because of me being hormonal and moody. However, today I come home after several days of visiting a relative and still he is in the same mood. I brought back a baby swing that a friend sold me for a great price. After some prodding, because it was driving me insane,he tells me he is having a hard time adjusting to the whole baby thing. We only have 15 more weeks! Not to sound selfish but I can't go through the last part of this feeling alone and unsupported. I work a full time job, a part time job, and am finishing another degree. I asked what I could do to help and all he said was quit bringing baby stuff in the house. I am at a loss. It is our first child and I am overwhelmed too but excited. Anyone have any suggestions or have encounterd this before?

My dh was kinda the same with our first child. He was distant and didn't want to look at gifts from our baby showers. It definitely caused a strain between us. However as soon as our son was born he really stepped up. He's a great dad and he's totally different this pregnancy. Hang in there. It will get better.

My dh was kinda the same with our first child. He was distant and didn't want to look at gifts from our baby showers. It definitely caused a strain between us. However as soon as our son was born he really stepped up. He's a great dad and he's totally different this pregnancy. Hang in there. It will get better.

I'm really sorry about all that you're going through. Can u just ignore what he said and continue doing what you do best? I'm really proud of you and all that you do. Hopefully, he'll come around before you know it.

I'm really sorry about all that you're going through. Can u just ignore what he said and continue doing what you do best? I'm really proud of you and all that you do. Hopefully, he'll come around before you know it.

Thank you all. I have no doubt he will be a great father. I guess I am going to just focus on preparing for our son and give DH some space. It is just difficult when I feel such distance from the man who has always been my best friend. I am very thankful for this board. It is awesome to talk to others who understand.

Thank you all. I have no doubt he will be a great father. I guess I am going to just focus on preparing for our son and give DH some space. It is just difficult when I feel such distance from the man who has always been my best friend. I am very thankful for this board. It is awesome to talk to others who understand.

Thank you all. I have no doubt he will be a great father. I guess I am going to just focus on preparing for our son and give DH some space. It is just difficult when I feel such distance from the man who has always been my best friend. I am very thankful for this board. It is awesome to talk to others who understand.

Thank you all. I have no doubt he will be a great father. I guess I am going to just focus on preparing for our son and give DH some space. It is just difficult when I feel such distance from the man who has always been my best friend. I am very thankful for this board. It is awesome to talk to others who understand.

Sounds like maybe he needs to talk with other fathers who really enjoy fatherhood. I bet it's all pretty scary for him if he doesn't know what to expect or how to prepare. Women kind of grow up preparing for parenthood , but men rarely get that chance. As a result, the learning curve tends to be steeper for men.

Sounds like maybe he needs to talk with other fathers who really enjoy fatherhood. I bet it's all pretty scary for him if he doesn't know what to expect or how to prepare. Women kind of grow up preparing for parenthood , but men rarely get that chance. As a result, the learning curve tends to be steeper for men.

I agree with pp. does he have any friends that have kids? Does he have any friends that are anti-kids? Guys friends unfortunately weigh heavily on their minds whether they realize it or not. One of my best friends got his gf pregnant and he told me a friend said "things would never be the same after the baby got here". It scared him to death. He is a great father and agrees that no things aren't the same ... Their so much better. Sometimes men are just detached until the lo actually gets here. They don't get the privilege of feeling lo everyday and having that bonding so it's not real. I Guarantee that when he holds that precious baby his heart will melt though. Sounds like he's just overwhelmed.

I agree with pp. does he have any friends that have kids? Does he have any friends that are anti-kids? Guys friends unfortunately weigh heavily on their minds whether they realize it or not. One of my best friends got his gf pregnant and he told me a friend said "things would never be the same after the baby got here". It scared him to death. He is a great father and agrees that no things aren't the same ... Their so much better. Sometimes men are just detached until the lo actually gets here. They don't get the privilege of feeling lo everyday and having that bonding so it's not real. I Guarantee that when he holds that precious baby his heart will melt though. Sounds like he's just overwhelmed.

How selfish of him! If it where me I would bring even more baby gear into the house! But then again I'm a spiteful b!tch! Men are sensory creatures it won't be real till he is holding baby in his arms! GL

How selfish of him! If it where me I would bring even more baby gear into the house! But then again I'm a spiteful b!tch! Men are sensory creatures it won't be real till he is holding baby in his arms! GL

Although it really comes across as selfish and insensitive, It sounds to me lime he's stressing about the responsibility! Financial and emotional! Just talk with him! It will be ok! Once he sees those sweet little eyes, his tune will change!

Although it really comes across as selfish and insensitive, It sounds to me lime he's stressing about the responsibility! Financial and emotional! Just talk with him! It will be ok! Once he sees those sweet little eyes, his tune will change!

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