Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Drunken recall. I gave my subjects massive quantities of alcohol and then I taught them things while they were blacked out. When they woke up the next morning, they couldn't remember anything. But when I got them drunk again, they remembered everything that I taught them the night before. I got it published. Phil "Landfill" Krundel: Where? Steve "Fink" Finklestein: In Maxim Magazine under the title: "E=MC Hammered".

Barry Badrinath: It's $10 for a BJ, $12 for an HJ, $15 for a ZJ... Landfill: [Interrupting] What's a ZJ? Barry Badrinath: If you have to ask, you can't afford it. Steve "Fink" Finklestein: [Trying to persuade Landfill] I've got $4.

Jan Wolfhouse: Sounds like you guys fancy yourselves as drinkers,huh? Rolf: Yeah, maybe a little bit, I think we just beat the Irish.

Otto: [Refering to Fink] Ya it looks like his head is covered in pubic hair Otto: but it's ok it works, ya, cause you've got a dickface.

Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Come on, guys. I'm a respected member of the scientific community. I've been published in four journals. Landfill: Which one? Toad Load Weekly?

Barry Badrinath: Hey Todd. About the old girlfriend. Can we bury the hatchet, buddy? Todd Wolfhouse: I don't know. Barry Badrinath: I mean it was a one night stand, right? I mean she wasn't even that good looking. A real dead fish, right? She just laid there and took it like a plastic fuck doll. Todd Wolfhouse: I happened to have MARRIED that plastic fuck doll!

Otto: Despite your thievery, we are prepared to buy it from you right now... in cash. [opens suitcase of euros] Jan Wolfhouse: Big deal. A suitcase full of monopoly money. Schlemmer: Come on, those are euros. Landfill: What's that, like pesos? Otto: That is legal European tender! Rolf: I told you we should have brought Deutsch marks. Gunter: But they are so hard to find!

Great Gam Gam: You two are the rightful heirs to the Von Wolfhausen Brewery. You should have the balls to take back what is yours! Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Wow! You even talk like a whore! Great Gam Gam: We are all whores in some ways.

Barry Badrinath: I was in Thailand playing ping-pong in Ding-Dang. A high stakes game in some opium den. Turns out, these aren't the types of guys who like to lose. When I beat them, they beat me. They worked me over good. And this is hard to say. They held me down and shoved a ping-pong paddle up my ass. Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Ah geeze Barry! I don't know what I'd do if someone shoved a paddle-handle up my ass! Barry Badrinath: It wasn't the handle! I've been shitting pancakes ever since! Great Gam Gam: You and I are not so different, Mr. Badrinath. I've had all kinds of things shoved up my ass. But I got over it!