Female and male decisions implicating on intimate relationships and dynamics

Saturday, 29 November 2014

Responding to girlfriend promotion

“You do what you
are, you are what you do.”

Most
men have a natural need that comes within to succeed. Disclaiming those lacking in ambition who are
happy to collect a benefit allowance and venture straight into the pub or
bookmakers, the vast majority of men have differing levels of drive and
motivation to fulfill their potential.

Defining
success is far more difficult. A large
share of men would view success as the highest salary they can possibly achieve
within realistic parameters. The
positive knock-on effect of this will be to own an expensive car and live in
the biggest house within the most affluent area. Other men would claim that money has little
to do with success, and it is all about accomplishments. They have a point, as I know plenty of people
with over six figures in the bank yet no memories of worthwhile note to
treasure.

Accomplishments
could be visiting the greatest places in the world, it could be an array of
sexual accomplishments with beautiful women of varied cultures and
nationalities, or it may possibly have been saving someone’s life, or even
their own life.

But
I would expect that the majority of men simply hold desires to find an honest
woman, raise children to be proud of, and be the most genuine man that people
like. There is no right or wrong way,
and this is the magic of life. But one
thing I do know is rarely can a person tick all of the boxes. There usually comes a choice, or at least a
decision, that has to be made.

Women
view life differently to men. As rarely
the main breadwinners in heterosexual relationships, women are less proactive
in laying out and achieving set goals.
There is nothing wrong with this.
Natural followers they may be, but this certainly doesn’t mean they
don’t know what they want and how to get there.
It could be argued that women are far more tuned to an end product, when
the time fits, than men. As the
reproductive gender, it can also be unofficially claimed women are more
valuable to society than men. This
subconscious but conceivable innate belief may go a long way for men scratching
their heads when a discussion turns to an argument. If he cannot track down a woman who has
empathetic and compromising traits, he should take comfort in the fact that he
won’t be alone.

So
the two tides sail in different directions to form a manifestation of female
behaviour. In the black corner stand men
trying to promote their life, and in the red corner are women who hold
predilections to wait, and react when things come to them.

To
counteract this perhaps perceived inferiority, women need to structure their
own weapon to balance things out. This,
more often than not, results in the process to promote their value to the
world. Self-doubts combined with
constant need for external social validation and approval is not a nice recipe,
and the only true way to combat this vulnerability is to strike back with
self-promotion and economical stories of the truth. On top of this, the natural drama queen
within them only further reinforces this tidal wave. Somehow, they have to show people that more
is happening in their life than the objectivity would suggest. Men, being men, can be the victims of their
own accustomed but uncontrollable naivety and jealousy.

So
to feed a woman’s value, this can be fulfilled by her own opinions, her
family’s words or her friend’s supplication and sycophancy. Sometimes it can be a trade, almost what you
will see on Facebook walls. You write on
my wall, and I’ll write on yours. Win-win
scenario for everyone. Most men do not
respond well to this because most men are not gifted with the blessings that
offer them choices with other females out there. Male positive attitude and confidence is far
more important than good looks, money or assets when appealing to projected
female eyes, but unfortunately not many men in percentage terms succeed here
too. So instead of a man taking his
girlfriend’s words with a pinch of salt, he crawls into his shell with doubts
of his own and fears that he isn’t good enough for her. This has a negative effect on her attraction
towards him, because women respond positively to calm, apathetic and
disinterested men. A woman will try and
get her man jealous to keep her ego and value in tack, but deep down she wants
him to be indifferent with this. A rise
smirk to confirm he is listening, followed by a comment that puts the promotion
in its true perspective, are the ingredients for her to like him more.

These
kinds of posts will be labeled: Responding
to girlfriend promotion, but it can be equally applicable to women you are
trying to appeal to in the early stages.
Examples will be given in how to respond with maximum reward being the
consequence. As I always advocate,
neither an extreme jerk or a full on nice guy wins over time.

Girl’s
mum or friend:“You’re lucky to be with
her you know.”

You: “I wouldn’t say I’m
lucky to be with her, but I am happy to be with her.”

Cynics
will debate that even the word “happy” is too strong towards the gratification
side, but I think ego degradation has to be in accordance.This answer still shows a man’s attainability,
but the purpose of confirming he isn’t fortunate has been achieved.Remember, never allow a woman to believe you
are grateful to be with her, because that is the moment she believes she could
do better.A slight tilt of the scales
towards losing him is better than a tilt of knowing she has him in the palm of
her hands.

Obviously
responses like this need to be in check with reality. So if a man is an unemployed guy with bad
body odour who miraculously scores a hot babe, this response may be a touch on
the unrealistic side. A better response
would be of total sarcasm:

“Nah,
she’s lucky to be with me.”

If
nothing else, at least this will have tarnished her ego.

Now
there is an even better response to female self-promotion when you are a man
with a great deal of value in the sexual market. This may not apply to many men in real terms,
but it can be used more often than the sparse numbers of men who have the guts
to apply it.

The
response I am about to illustrate needs to be used carefully and in context of
the guy you are. This is why I
re-iterate that it is only for certain men with certain women. The best example would be a good looking man
with a hot girlfriend, but it could also be applicable to an above average
looking man who has a cute bit on the go.

Girl’s
mum or friend: “You’re lucky to be with
her you know.”

You: “Do you know much
about economics? (expect pause or gone out face). If so, you will know all about supply and
demand.”

Leave
it at that. The obvious explanation is
that there are far more women of her type than men of your calibre. A thorough chapter and verse reasoning behind
your words is not required, as very few men will have ever got a woman moist
and hungry through too much psychological back chat.

Nevertheless,
a very good looking man with many other desirables will need to tread carefully when
using this tactic. Although women want
to be with a man who other women sexually desire, there is a balance to
strike. Once a woman gets a sniff of his
value stretching to a point where innumerable female rivals and peers are into
him, the positivity that jealousy brings can border over to a feeling of him
being too much hassle. Her ego is then
damaged that little bit too much and she may reluctantly move on, leading with
the vain convincing of her mind that he is the one who has lost out.

This
is why a woman’s ideal man is someone with huge quality (top 1%) in every department
– except physical looks. As long as she
is the star of the show when people set eyes on the two of them, any doubts she
may have towards the relationship due to his potential infidelity will be
placed to one side.

About Me

Tough and sensitive. Firm but kind. Happy to help, but not here to be used. Once naive, now astute. Versatile and ranged. Balanced yet peripheral. Stylish but not extravagant. Stands out at the same time as blending in.