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Not really, because apparently I'm attracted to ISFJs and INTJs. ISTJs just aren't my cup of tea, and you may have to accept the fact that all ENFPs are different - I've seen NFs who swear they would never date an SJ (any SJ!), ENFPs who say other NFPs are the best, NFs who only want other NFs, and NFs who are obsessed with NTs to the point of insanity. Then you'll have those ENFPs who want to be with an ISTJ. Take it for what it is, bro.

Ummm...nope. My grandfather was an excellent father figure and the rock of my life. He was the most stable person in our family. ISTJ males when healthy make excellent family men.

*sighs* I like introverts. Different people just need different things, that's all. You're getting upset because you're internalizing what we're saying. I've done this before in threads where INTJs were saying ENFPs and INTJs should never be together. Don't do that - don't internalize it. It doesn't mean YOUR relationship won't work - you may end up like my friend and her husband and live happily ever after, or at least the closest you can come to that in reality.

None of this was directed at you personally...it was me just rambling after reading the post.

I'm not angry, though. I'm just trying to get an ENFP's perception of how they could make the thing work better.

As an ENFP, I hated my ISTJ roomate "Prince". That guy had such a huge stick up his ass. Always wanting to pull me to the side and "talk" about shit. Then, when I was like...no, he got pissed at me, and started accusing me of leaving dishes in the sink....

Can you spell...P S Y C H O?

So NO, I don't think we really get along well. Or that the hatred is a fun game.

The motivation is love for the person..........which would work if both parties are committed to the relationship. Love is bigger than MBTI, isn't it? If it's about us, not you, wouldn't it work?

I'm just asking the question....when I say ENFP blindspots, I mean being so concerned about your own needs that you forget that person has needs as well, and there has to be a willingness to compromise to make it work. I really fail to see how 2 mature people couldn't learn to work with each other, and make it work.

I'm not talking personal preference. I find on this board, though, there's no talk of if you really love this person, how much compromise am I willing to make? Just like you'd want this guy to be a little more emotionally connected, how receptive are you of the guy's wishes (whatever the particulars are, because no ISTJ is the same?) I'm just saying if you are saying it won't work based off preconceived notions that opposing functions don't work, you're missing the forest for a few trees, aren't you?

i did say that i spoke of one experience and couldn't speak for others...i did say that and i have said that there were years of compromise...like 13 years iz...it's a a whole lot of trying on both sides..and for us in the end the conclusion was that love shouldn't be so hard...and we're just two very different people...so...good luck to anyone who wants to try it...i'm not saying others can't do it and be happy...i'm just saying there's a reason we score our types and those reasons could cause conflict that will last a lifetime...or not...i guess it depends on how strongly you hold your values.

There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.

i did say that i spoke of one experience and couldn't speak for others...i did say that and i have said that there were years of compromise...like 13 years iz...it's a a whole lot of trying on both sides..and for us in the end the conclusion was that love shouldn't be so hard...and we're just two very different people...so...good luck to anyone who wants to try it...i'm not saying others can't do it and be happy...i'm just saying there's a reason we score our types and those reasons could cause conflict that will last a lifetime...or not...i guess it depends on how strongly you hold your values.

Gotcha. Thanks for chiming in. I appreciate the feedback I'm getting from the thread. I hope you guys don't think I'm going crazy on y'all lol

I appreciate this thread and the feedback as well! I guess I will have to let you guys know if the melody stops playing and the record skips a beat with the ENFP guy I've been seeing.

I can definitely see the potential for problems, but I do agree that any two people of any type should be able to make it work harmoniously. I like the idea that was brought up though about making a pro/con list and making sure you can live with the cons. This appeals highly to my ISTJness.