The hot multicultural women's magazine, SISTERDIVAS, now has a blog component! Here at the SisterDivas Blog, we will offer more interviews, more articles, and more features for women. Please leave comments!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Check out our relationship column, Dear ReRe!

Dear ReRe is SisterDivas' quarterly relationship column, and in every issue, ReRe brings it to readers REAL and with feeling. Check out one of the latest "issues" going on in the life of a SisterDiva:

Dear ReRe,

I have a big problem. I'm practically a newlywed, been married for less than a year, and my husband and I are constantly at each other's throats. Even before we were married, we argued, but the arguments have just increased from the time before the wedding 'til now. To make matters worse, a few weeks ago, I was on our laptop, typing up a resume, and I found out that he's been chatting on a few "friend" sites and stating that he's single and looking to meet women interested in a relationship. His e-mail inbox was full of responses from women. He "cheated" on me before with internet flings before we were married, and he swore he would never do it again. I believed him. I've been trying hard not to show my anger, to show my depression at my husband, but I'm at the point now where I'm ready to just walk away and say I made a mistake with this marriage.

To Flee or Not to Flee

To Flee or Not to Flee,

I wish I could sit you on the couch and talk more about your dilemma. So many questions are popping up into my head. Did you want to get married? Were you in love with your husband before you married? Why do you think you two argue so much? If I had to be real, and I'm nothing BUT that, I would tell you it's time to kick hubby to the curb. He betrayed your relationship prior to the marriage and now that you two are married, and not even for a year, he's back to his old tricks--that's if he ever gave them up to begin with. Whether you stay or not solely depends on you, and no matter what you choose, you still should get to the bottom of all this. Talk to him. Demand the truth. Demand to know what's going on in his head, to see why he's doing this. Be honest, too. Tell him exactly how you feel and what you want out of a marriage. Go to counseling if you want to salvage the marriage. The point is to do what YOU need to do to be happy in the long run. If you think you can leave with a man who says he will love you before all others and yet lies and cheats, go for it. If you want something better for yourself, cut him loose and find someone who is deserving of you.