Citi Bike Is a Nazi-Muslim Plan to Firebomb New York City

Decades after the U.S. and British Air Forces firebombed the German city of Dresden to the ground, its citizens have finally taken their revenge by filling New York with so-called "modernfirebombs": bicycles.

We've learned from various rich people over the last week, New York's new bike-sharing program Citi Bike is a socialist plot carried out by the "all-powerful bike lobby." But as Frontpage Mag's Daniel Greenfield persuasively argues in a piece from last month, it's also a Nazi Muslim plot, over three generations, to enact revenge for the firebombing of Dresden.

You see, Bloomberg's transportation commissioner Janette Sadik-Khan is the granddaughter of a Nazi collaborator:

Bicycles are one of the obsessions of Mayor Bloomberg and his transportation secretary Janette Sadik-Khan. Khan is the granddaughter of Imam Alimjan Idris, a Nazi collaborator and principle teacher at an SS school for Imams under Hitler’s Mufti, Haj Amin al-Husseini. The bio of his son, Wall Street executive Orhan Sadik-Khan, frequently mentions the bombing of the family home in Dresden and surviving trying times after World War II. It neglects to mention that the times were only trying because their side was losing.

In 1933, Idris wrote a letter asking why Allah would have chosen the Jews, whom he described as, “the most despicable, repulsive and corrupting nation on earth.” It’s hard to say what Imam Idris would have made of his granddaughter marrying a Jewish law professor and peddling bikes that no one wants from a nearly bankrupt Montreal government company.

It's probably not "hard" to say what an anti-Semitic Nazi collaborator would have made of his granddaughter marrying a Jew... Unless he wasn't a Nazi at all—but a Soviet agent!

But considering that Imam Idris was at times accused of being a Soviet agent and did some work for Imperial Japan, it seems likely that he would have understood.

It... does seem... likely that a Soviet agent Tartar who worked for Imperial Japan would have understood bike sharing, I guess. But it doesn't matter, because this Nazi Japanese-Soviet Agent Muslim's plan—no doubt passed down to his granddaughter, born six years after his death, in a hollowed-out copy of Mein Kampf—has finally come to fruition:

In partial revenge, Khan has made many New York streets nearly as impassable as those of her grandfather’s wartime Dresden. Bike lanes have turned two lane streets into one lane streets. Infidels sit in their cars and honk while bike lanes go unused and midtown bus lanes sit empty except for the occasional daring taxi driver braving the bus lane camera and the 150 dollar fine.

Yes, as the photograph above demonstrates, New York City streets are "nearly as impassable" as those in "wartime Dresden." Nearly impassable for cars, that is—Muslims, and presumably their German collaborators, can, and will, whiz by on bikes, hustling in 30-minute increments to pray at the Ground Zero Mosque, carrying bombs in the included bike baskets, their Muslim robes protected from the gear by the bikes' attractive chain guards.

Of such strange alliances is the technocratic banana republic on the Hudson woven. A Muslim Nazi collaborator’s granddaughter oversees the de-car-ing of a city after a plan based around a plan from the tenure of a modern collaborator with Muslim Nazis falls through. Imam Idris might have called it the providence of Allah. But more likely he would have found a way to get his piece of the pie.

Later in the essay Greenfield complains that Bloomberg is planting the wrong kind of trees.