Lifestyle

A few stands down on carnival restaurant row, Pickle O'Pete's is selling Pickle Dogs. It's a big honking kosher pickle that's hollowed out with an apple corer, stuffed with a hot dog, then plopped in corn dog batter and deep-fried to a golden brown. It's a killer diller pickle.

They're $10 … flying across the counter.

"This is a competitive business. If you're not innovating, you're failing. I'm already thinking of new food items we'll be introducing at next year's rodeo," Palmieri said.

Palmieri warned me that he had a bunch of new things to try. So I brought a crew of relief taste-testers: three pitchers from the Lamar High School baseball team, Andrew, Matthew and Andrew.

"OK, boys, are you ready for a night of 'Treats, Meats and Sweets?' I hope you're hungry," Palmieri said.

He made it sound like a threat.

The first thing we ate was a Pickle Dog. That's some appetizer, not exactly a Ritz cracker with a tiny piece of salmon.

Then we walked to Biggy's stand, where we had a Big Daddy Corn Dog - a footlong, ¾-pound hot dog dipped and deep-fried, for $11. The monster corn dog is full-on delicious. It looks like a billy club.

Before you shriek in horror, I am a veteran of self-loathing through eating. I know how to pace myself. I ate only a few bites of everything.

I read Ray Kroc's autobiography. In McDonald's early years, Kroc outfitted his restaurants with uncomfortable, hard plastic chairs on purpose, so customers would eat fast and leave. Kroc was all about turning tables.

Palmieri thinks the other way. He wants carnival guests to linger, stick around and be comfortable. He figures, if he can keep you at the carnival for six hours, he gets to sell you two meals. This year, Palmieri has doubled the number of chairs, benches and tables on the midway. There's seating for 2,500 people. So loosen your belt from that Pickle Dog you had for lunch, take a load off, and rest up for dinner.

Hamburgers have always been a big seller at Big Daddy's booth. This year, instead of frying the ½-pound Certified Angus Beef patties on a flat grill, Big Daddy's cooks them on an open grate over mesquite. And now the yellow Kaiser buns are toasted. They're really terrific burgers. The Big Daddy burger, $10.95, was the only thing … I ate the whole thing.

Uh-oh, the Big Rib is back. Another Palmieri brainstorm, the Big Rib is two pounds of lean steak on a Fred Flintstone-size bone. Talk about your original food on a stick. My bullpen split a Big Rib. I took the bone home in a doggy bag for Lilly.

Beef prices are up big time. Palmieri said that he's paying 40 percent higher prices for beef this week than just three months ago. It's because of the drought out west and the Polar Vortex back east. Yadda yadda, the Big Rib goes for $19.95 this year.

Palmieri runs the food concessions for Ray Cammack Shows, which runs the midway for RodeoHouston, the Los Angeles County Fair, Coachella Music Festival and other major shows. RodeoHouston is Ray Cammack's biggest event.

"Regional tastes play a big part in what we do. In Texas, people like spicy food. In California, not so spicy. Stuffed baked potatoes are more popular in Texas than anywhere else. Funnel cakes are big in Texas. You couldn't give away a funnel cake in the Northwest," Palmieri said.

Funnel cakes just got even bigger. For the first time, you can get a Double Decker Funnel Cake - two funnel cakes with a 2-inch layer of whipped cream in the middle, topped by fresh strawberries and more whipped cream. It's $16.

We stopped by the Spud Ranch, and I sampled the Tater Dog - a footlong frank surrounded by an accordion spiral of freshly fried, Parmesan-flavored potato chips. It's $10.

"I know that food at the carnival is fun and some of it's wacky, but I take my job seriously," Palmieri said. "The food we sell on the midway has to be delicious, and we have to sell it at a reasonable price. Otherwise, people won't buy it. People are very demanding. I call this the Foodie Boomer Generation. You can trace a change in my industry to the start of the Food Network. People want more than just hot dogs, although we sell a lot of hot dogs."

This surprised me: For the first time, the carnival is selling Tater Tots. They're a hit. Over the first four days, the carnival sold more tots than fries. I remained loyal to my Garlic Fries, $8.50. Palmieri said the midway will go through more than a ton of freshly chopped garlic this rodeo. I think half of that was on my plate of fries.

My team split a 2-pound order of Colossal Fries, $9. They're served in an 18-inch paper cone that looks like a dunce cap. Hey, if it fits …

The hurlers, and by hurlers I mean baseball pitchers, kept it together, even on the "Insanity" thrill ride after we ate.

Finally, dessert. The hot new treat is Deep Fried Pecan Pie, $8. It was created and tested at last year's RodeoHouston and is making its debut at this year's roundup. And just in case your pecan pie isn't sweet enough, they'll cover it in powdered sugar and chocolate syrup.