Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Recently I have thinking about the term "Best Friends". Personally, I think it is a label we throw out there quite too frequently. Often, "Best" friendships can develop from varying places at the oddest times: school, work, the gym, clubs, etc. It's an evolution that happens before we even realize. These friendships can exist 2000 miles apart or under the same roof. Distance is not the issue; it is the merit of the friendships that matter. But what drives us to romanticize certain "Best Friendships"? Is it because there is history? Is it routine? Is it about keeping a social status? What is it about keeping those "Best Friendships" alive, that are no longer valid to our lives? Most people have a difficult time with the idea of change, which is a factor. Letting an era end is sad. Some relationships are salvageable, but some are can become toxic to you both. People change, grow apart, and move their separate ways. There is a season for everything, people come and go, but it is natural for this progression to happen.
A "Best Friend" is not only someone who is there for you in your time of need, tells you, you look skinny when you've lost weight, or that your new hair cut looks amazing, and all the other cliche things. A "Best Friend" is someone who constantly is CHALLENGING you. They want you to be the best you that you can be (no, I'm not talking about the Army).

HONESTY is key- when you are wrong in a certain situation, or you have gained 25 lbs. after breaking up with your boyfriend, you rely on those friendships to help you see the error of your way. A lot of times we can become blind, selectively or not, to issues in our lives, and every now and then we need to be called out. We may not like it (I certainly don't), but that is what we need.

ENCOURAGEMENT. I cannot stress encouragement enough in friendships. Our best friends are the one who encourage us, not only in difficult times, but encourage positive growth, encourage our spiritual walk, encourage us to step outside of our boxes.

PRAYER. Your best friends pray for you like they pray for themselves. They pray not for what you ask, but for God's will do be done. They pray for your personal and spiritual growth, along with peace in your life.

Honesty, encouragement, and prayer, in my opinion are the key ingredients for a successful "Best Friendship. A "Best Friend" is not someone who compromises you or your integrity in any way, is not someone who pick and chooses when to support you, is not someone who thrives on bringing you down, when they, themselves are suffering. Being a "Best Friend" can be hard work. Sometimes it's hard telling the truth or watching your friend go through a difficult time, but because you love your friends you do it, willingly.

We should strive to be "Best Friends" in all of our friendships. Making the most out of all relationships should be a common goal in our lives. So, I ENCOURAGE you to evaluate your "Best Friendships". Be honest with yourself. In return, reflect on the way you are treating your friends.