Twilight Sparkle: First lesson of the day, we very carefully set the table without using magic, so that— Yikes!

[silverware clattering]

Twilight Sparkle: Did you...?! How? When? What?!

Starlight Glimmer: What?

Twilight Sparkle: I said no magic. You were supposed to do it by hoof so I could work in a friendship lesson.

Starlight Glimmer: Oh, I heard "set the table" and just kinda went for it.

Twilight Sparkle: Well, if you hadn't used magic, you'd have heard me say, uh... this plate represents your head, this spoon is your heart, and the knives... are sharp! Always be careful with knives. [sigh] The metaphors make more sense when you're actually setting the table.

Starlight Glimmer: Should I... change it back?

Twilight Sparkle: I just want to make sure you're ready for this dinner. Princess Celestia will be joining us tomorrow night to see how the friendship lessons are going!

Starlight Glimmer: If it's just you, me, and Princess Celestia, why are there four seats?

Twilight Sparkle: Well, the whole point is for you to bring a new friend. That way, the princess will see for herself just how far you've come. And how good a teacher you have.

Starlight Glimmer: Well, I can't choose. I like all your friends.

Twilight Sparkle: That's the best part! You have to make a new friend!

Starlight Glimmer: New friends? Hey, maybe I'll just force friendships by magically enslaving the entire population of Ponyville!

Starlight Glimmer: I guess my first question would be, "What's a Wonderbolt?"

Rainbow Dash: [gasps] You've never heard of the Wonderbolts?! Where have you been?!

Starlight Glimmer: [nervously] Enslaving villages, I guess...

Rainbow Dash: Right.

Angel: [giggling]

Starlight Glimmer: You're adorable, but probably not what Twilight had in mind.

Fluttershy: [sighs]

[ponies chattering]

Starlight Glimmer: [groan] What is going on? This is Ponyville! If I can't make a friend here, there's gotta be something wrong with me! [sighs] Okay, calm down. Nobody makes friends with a total stresscase.

[more ponies chattering]

Starlight Glimmer: [to herself] Stop stressing... Stop stressing!

[long beat]

[door opens and shuts]

Starlight Glimmer: [sighs] This is just what I needed.

Trixie: [sighs] Tell me about it.

Starlight Glimmer: You ever have one of those days?

Trixie: For me, they're all one of those days.

Starlight Glimmer: [giggles]

Trixie: I'm gonna start coming here every time I visit Ponyville.

Starlight Glimmer: I'm not from here either. I've been trying to make friends, but it's not easy. They're not saying it, but I think everypony knows about my past. I may have been a tiny bit... completely and utterly evil?

Starlight Glimmer: [sarcastically] Great. Thanks for asking in a completely not creepy way.

Twilight Sparkle: Because you know, if it isn't working out for any reason, I could introduce you to my friend here.

[bush rustling]

Starlight Glimmer: [deadpan] Nice to meet you.

Twilight Sparkle: No, no! You can come out now!

[dubstep playing]

Twilight Sparkle: You like music, right? DJ Pon-3'd be the perfect friend for tonight's incredibly important dinner with Celestia. You know, if you decide to make a last-minute change. Heh.

Starlight Glimmer: So back at your castle when you said "I trust you", you meant "I don't trust you".

Twilight Sparkle: [nervously] Who can really say who said what? I know I can't! [to DJ Pon-3] Can you?

[dubstep fades out]

Twilight Sparkle: Starlight, I'm just trying to look out for you.

Starlight Glimmer: [sighs] I appreciate it, but you're wrong about Trixie. She's just like me. We have a real connection.

Twilight Sparkle: That's kind of what I'm afraid of. Oh! What about her?

[thump]

Starlight Glimmer: Please, Twilight! I know you're trying to help, but I need to make friends on my own if I'm going to become a better pony.

Twilight Sparkle: But do you really think Trixie's the one to help you with that?

Starlight Glimmer: Wow. Trixie was right. You're not really giving her a second chance. I wonder what that says about how you feel about me.

Cranky Doodle Donkey: [snorts]

[bird flapping]

Twilight Sparkle: Oh! Now he'd be perfect!

Starlight Glimmer: [groans]

[thump]

[dragging]

Starlight Glimmer: I was thinking. You said Twilight is better than you at everything, but that's not true. You're better at magic.

Trixie: Only when I'm wearing a soul-sucking evil amulet, so I don't think that counts. Funny story. Don't need to get into it.

Starlight Glimmer: I meant stage magic.

Trixie: Well, of course! Great? Yes. Powerful? Obviously. But I'm not the best. As great and powerful as I am, there's one trick I've never been able to do – the Moonshot Manticore Mouth Dive!

[silent film-type piano music and film reel flickering]

Trixie: [narrating] Only one magician has ever pulled it off – my hero, Hoofdini! You are supposed to blast yourself into the open mouth of a hungry manticore! After the manticore chews you up and swallows you, you magically step out of a box on the other side of the stage!

[film reel runs out]

Trixie: Completely unharmed!

Starlight Glimmer: That sounds very...

Trixie: Dangerous?

Starlight Glimmer: I was gonna say cool!

Trixie: I knew I liked you for a reason. I don't know how he did it! If I tried it, I'd get chewed up and swallowed by that manticore.

Starlight Glimmer: Not if you could use real magic.

Trixie: Obviously. Way to rub it in.

Starlight Glimmer: No, I mean, I could help! You could start the trick, and right before you got chewed up, I could use magic to save you...

[magic zap]

Starlight Glimmer: ...and make you appear in the black box!

Trixie: I guess that would work... But if you made one mistake, I'd be a goner.

Starlight Glimmer: Hah. When it comes to magic, I don't make mistakes. Maybe I could be your... magic show helper pony!

Trixie: We call it "assistant" in the magician biz. And... nopony's ever offered to help before.

Starlight Glimmer: Well, I'd be honored.

Trixie: You may have just made my great and powerful magic show even better! Which I didn't think was possible! We're gonna blow them away tonight!

Starlight Glimmer: [groans] I can't! Tonight's this incredibly important dinner with Twilight.

Trixie: Oh.

Starlight Glimmer: Can I vent for a minute?

Trixie: What are friends for?

Starlight Glimmer: Even after Twilight says she trusts me, she clearly doesn't trust me enough to choose my own friends. [sighs] I guess you were right. No second chances.

Trixie: Hmph, I wish I could say I was surprised. Well, lucky for Princess Twilight, I have my magic show tonight. If you have to go to the dinner, I completely understand. [dramatically] I just hope I find a way to survive the Moonshot Manticore Mouth Dive without my new assistant!

[ice sculpture dripping]

Twilight Sparkle: Starlight Glimmer should be here, heh, any minute, heh. Any minute now... [nervous laugh] [forced] How about I introduce everyone? Our friendship lessons are going so well! She made three new friends! She has such great taste in friends. I don't know where she would've learned that! [nervous laugh]

Pinkie Pie: So this is the Humble and Penitent Trixie's Equestrian Apology Tour?

Applejack: Ain't that a mouthful of molasses.

Trixie: It's a working title! Oh, this is gonna be the greatest night of my life! Excuse me. Our lives.

Starlight Glimmer: [sighs] I'm so glad we're not at that boring dinner.

Twilight Sparkle: Ahem? You just decided to skip our dinner without telling me? Are you aware that, at this very moment, Princess Celestia is waiting for you at a table with exquisite silverware placement?!

Starlight Glimmer: Yes, but—

Twilight Sparkle: This is exactly why I didn't want you to make friends with Trixie.

Trixie: A-ha! You still don't trust me! But guess what, princess? It doesn't matter if you want to give me a second chance or not. Starlight had to choose between you and me, and she chose me! Your pupil chose me, so ha! I win!

Starlight Glimmer: You win? That sounds like you just made friends with me to beat Twilight.

Trixie: Exactly! [beat] Wait! I mean, no! I got caught up in the moment. I like you. Beating Twilight is just a bonus. [gasps] Saying that didn't help, did it?

Trixie: [sighs] Looks like the Great and Powerful Trixie is back to a solo show.

Twilight Sparkle: Trixie?

Trixie: ...Which is exactly the way she likes it! Thank you, Princess Twilight, for getting rid of that annoying pony who wanted to be my first friend! I am not sad at all! I definitely don't feel as if my heart is breaking into a million pieces!

Trixie: [unenthusiastic] For tonight, the Great and Powerful Trixie will be performing the Moonshot Manticore Mouth Dive.

[crowd gasps]

Trixie: [unenthusiastic] Now, now, save your gasps for when I defy the beast's jaws of doom and appear inside that black box. [dramatically] I was supposed to perform this trick with my great and powerful assistant, who was also my great and powerful friend!

Twilight Sparkle: Starlight, when I first came to Ponyville, Princess Celestia gave me room to make my own decisions and my own friends. I need to give you the same freedom. I shouldn't have tried to pick and choose your friends for you. Just like me, you have to make your own decisions and your own friends.

Starlight Glimmer: But... what if Trixie really was using me just to one-up you?

Twilight Sparkle: From what I've seen, she's the real thing.

[fuse lights]

Twilight Sparkle: But it's not my place to judge. It's all up to you.

[manticore roars]

[fuse hisses]

Trixie: Starlight? If you're out there and you still want to be friends, let's be great and powerful together! [slightly echoing] Please?

[cannon fires]

[manticore roars]

Trixie: [shrieks]

[manticore swallows and belches]

[crowd gasps]

Fluttershy: [faints]

[crowd confused]

[magic zap]

[crunch]

Trixie: [woozy] Behold, the Peat and Growerful Triskie...!

[thud]

[beat]

[crowd cheers]

Trixie: [amplified] And now, I'm proud to introduce my great and powerful assistant! [normal] And best friend. [amplified] Starlight Glimmer!

[crowd cheers]

Twilight Sparkle: Trixie!

Trixie: What do you want?

Twilight Sparkle: I was wrong. I'm sorry. And I have to hand it to you. I could never have pulled off a trick like that.

Trixie: Thank you, princess.

[fireworks launch]

[ice sculpture dripping]

Cranky Doodle Donkey: How do you get your hair to do that all the time?