NOTE: Soon, we will no longer be strangers, because I will regularly be posting to the blog! I’m to the point where I want to post at least once a week—probably on Sundays with the exception of today. So that’s something fun and new.

Today, though, I am going to suggest five summer reads for the current summer season (or any time, really). I’m going to give you five suggestions that aren’t by Nicholas Sparks, don’t take place on a beach, and aren’t Fifty Shades of Grey. I’m also going to suggest you stop rereading the Harry Potter series, because nothing is going to change. You’re still going to cry in the same exact places. And I think it’s just time to stop being so sad.

“The Catcher in the Rye” Your age-old American story about an angsty seventeen year old boy that gets kicked out of his school and generally is being a little shit. And I mean Independence Day is in the summer, and the main character kind of does whatever he wants, so, it’s kind of relevant? ‘MERICA. But it’s so good. And it’s a classic. And if you read classics, you can sound smarter to academic superiors, and you can woo them by not talking about how Fifty Shades of Grey is your favorite book. Because Fifty Shades of Grey is a horrible book. It’s not good. Read something else.

“Lolita” For those of you who want a love story and have already read all of Nicholas Sparks’ novels twice, try “Lolita.” It’s a little more twisted, but a beautiful love story. Just try to ignore the child molestation. I said it was a bit twisted. Keep an open mind.

Anything by John Green. But if you haven’t read anything, I suggest “Looking for Alaska.” A lot of people have read it. It’s a fairly easy read while still being able to hold your attention and not boring you. I read it in a day…much like I do with all other John Green novels. I read John Green novels like I fall asleep, slowly and then all at once. PUN. Read John Green novels, and you’ll know what I’m talking about. (:

“Divergent” For Sci-Fi fans, like me. Divergent was a nice and fairly easy read. It’s dystopian, and I mean what better way to spend your summer than reading about the corruption in government? Also, it’s becoming a movie sometime soon. So if you’re one of those people who like to read the books before you see the movie OR if you’re one of those people who like to be an asshole to the people who watch the movie and haven’t read the book so you need to read the book, get on it.

“Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland” I really like reading children’s lit sometimes, because it’s refreshing not having a heavy plot with major villains and heroes. People like scandalous and raunchy novels during the summer, and while this isn’t at all erotic, it talks about the loss of innocence? Kind of scandalous? People lose their innocence in the summer? Just in a different way? Read it.