Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Pome About a Few of the Blights of My Life

You know what I hate? I hate Emoticons
I find them infantile
and puerile
and ugly to boot
and that's the troot.
I consider them quite totally offensive
and reprehensive.

I think that the person who invented them
or first presented them
should be forced to have them tatooed over every inch of their epidermis, both exposed and hidden
and then they should be tied naked to the back of a horse and ridden
through the downtown of every city of 50,00 or more regardless of the weather
and people should be encouraged to get together
and throw overripe fruit and tomatoes
and hurl lewd remarks and insults and threats at them
and shame and scare the bejesus out of them.

And as for the ones people make out of innocent punctuation
they are equally silly, irritating and require eradication.
Only difference is that while being equally deplorable and unadorable
They are at least a bit more ignorable.

So I say Faugh on all who use them.....those "pictures" are for the birds....
What in the hell is wrong with words?

And for my next number
I want to see the complete disappearance of the use of "lol"
And may everyone who ignores my plea be sentenced to eternally trying to eat an ice cream cone
in Hell.

They were started after a huge brouhaha erupted over a joke posted by someone at a university on some kind of shared board, and were intended to simply let people know something wasn't to be taken seriously. The joke had to do with the leaking of something toxic, i think, in the lab, but it didn't actually happen and was intended to make everyone laugh.

You are right that they are more irritating than enlightening most of the time.

Nice poem. I HATE LOLS and stupid faces made of brackets. When I see them I just thing the person is an imbecile. Friends say "oh they help you to see what the person means in a message". I say that if you have such a poor grasp of the English language that you have to resort to emoticons then you're an idiot. And to think that I can't understand your message unless you put a silly sad face made of symbols in it, then you're patronising and insulting me. Grrrrr!

If someone is jesting then they should just write haha or put an exclamation mark at the end. When I see these LOLs and Emoticons in emails and texts it secretly changes the way I see the person. I think they're puerile, a bit dense, and a little common as well.

Unless you;re a 14 year old girl with a low-level of education then you shouldn't be using them in my opinion. Rant over.

I just found you to my delight. Your poem about emoticons made me howl. I'd like to send it to two former students who are tech nerds to their very bones. I hope this is okay with you--I'll certainly give you attribution. I'll wait a bit for your response, though, just in case. Consider yourself bookmarked and enjoyed.

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About Me

Maverick of a weird, but wonderful family. Have managed to stay alive for an astounding 86+ years kept alive by a passionate interest in many things and a sense of humor.
Have led 2 or 3 separate lives,the first 40 years as a starving artist, ceramist, and graphic designer. At age 40 a matchbook cover that said "Be A Computer Programmer" inspired me to go back to school and emerge as a binary fanatic. Loved my work, had a wonderful 20 year career as programmer and trouble shooter. At the same time I had the chance to meet, befriend and marry Jazz Cornetist Pete Daily,an idol of my youth, whom I had worshipped in my young life. Lost him to cancer after 11 wonderful (and sometimes awful) years. Retired in 1989 and had 20 years of fantastic travel adventures all over the world. Now I crochet afghans, tend my garden, my 3 cats, the neighborhood birds and squirrels, a flock of voracious hummingbirds and assorted wildlife like possums and raccoon families who come nightly to my Porch Buffet. A great life, and it ain't over yet !....(after all, I have just discovered Blogging....)