Friday, 18 November 2016

How Can We Have Food Banks When Buckingham Palace Needs Renovating?

The radical Britain-hating left are predictably getting worked up about the cost (a trifling £370 million) of renovating Buckingham Palace.

Some are even asking the treasonous question of how we can afford the cost (extraordinary value really) when food banks exist in Britain.

Firstly, it is of course a lie that food banks exist at all. But even if they did, a more pertinent question is how can we afford food banks for layabouts when our poor, impoverished royals live in a palace lacking the luxury and modernity their untiring devotion to Britain deserves. 800 rooms don't heat themselves after all and it's absolutely essential that our majesty has access to the latest servant-summoning technology rather than rely on ringing bells and pressing buzzers.

So what should we do about food banks? Of course there is no evidence that any exist at all, but just on the off-chance they do I suggest that everyone using one be forced to give a voluntary donation to a fund for impoverished royals. That ought to redress the balance between the deserving haves and undeserving have-nots!