A horrendous company that has somehow managed to stay afloat for years and appeal to a mass of misguided people. They specialize in taking existing technology, making it all shiny and fancy looking, and re-selling it for double the price. Ironically, their slogan is "Think Different".

Their latest and greatest gadget that's getting all the attention is, of course, the iPhone, which is basically comparable to any high-quality $150 phone, except it has "innovative" touch screen technology, and it sells for $600.

Apple couldn't quite figure out how to make an operating system, so they just stole the freeBSD kernel and repackaged a bastardized version of it as Mac OS X. It's funny that Apple brags that it's "Unix-based", since no one with experience in Unix would ever use a Mac.

Apple frequently runs "clever" ads. Although they've made a ton of them, all the ads boil down to how Windows has viruses and crashes all the time. Apple also have an enormous, cult-like fanbase that like to remind us of these things every five seconds. Apple fanboys are generally smug, annoying, and arrogant, despite the fact that most of them don't know jack shit about computers.

Apple Fanboy: "M$ is teh sux0r! Apple pwns!"

Windows User: "Windows has a wide selection of software and games, and a huge developer community."

Apple Fanboy: "BUT IT CRASHES AND HAS VIRUSES LOL"

Windows User: "My OS hasn't crashed since I had Windows ME. And AVG is a free program that keeps my computer secure."

Apple Fanboy: "BUT WINDOZE SUXX!"

Windows User: "Would you care to tell me about your Mac? I hear it doesn't have many tools for software developers, which are important for my work."

Apple Fanboy: "lolololol but windows sucks!!!11"

Windows User: "Did you know that a great amout of Apple software is made with Microsoft Visual C++?"

THE MOST BADASS FUCKING FRUIT ON THE FUCKING PLANET. SERIOUSLY, THIS MOTHERFUCKER KICKS THE SHIT OUT OF THE PUSSY ORANGE OR BANANA. THIS JUICY, RED MOTHERFUCKER IS THE BEST FUCKING THING THAT GOD HAS EVER CREATED. EAT AN A APPLE AND YOUR DICK WILL GROW 3 INCHES. FUCK.