I meet Kick-Ass at the local comicbook shop down the street. He's sitting at
a table next to a stack of comicbooks. A sign next
to him says 'Meet the Real Life Kick-Ass'.
Although the store is crowded nobody is paying much attention to Kick-Ass. He
looks angry about that.

Me: Hi Kick-Ass. Mind if I ask you some questions?

Kick-Ass: You got any coffee on you?

(I pat myself down.)

Me: No.

Kick-Ass: Do you think you can make that happen?

Me: What me get you coffay?

Kick-Ass: That would be Kick-Ass!

(He points superhero style at the front door. I don't move.)

Kick-Ass: I was just testing you. Glad you're not a sucker. Question me up!