Thursday, May 19, 2016

134. Living alone

Living by myself.

I haven’t gone crazy yet, if you’re wondering. I’ve just passed the two month mark in my own place. I mean, I’m not surprised, but I thought the solo living anxiety would kick in at some point. It hasn’t. I’ve been able to keep a healthy, productive schedule, with enough balance between exercise and entertainment that I’ve been able to stay sane. I don’t know how long that will last.

My friend Jack stayed with me for a couple days this week. It was nice to have him around because I don’t get to see him and his wife Chelsea all that often. He remarked that the apartment still looked pretty simple. He asked if I had all my stuff at my place. I kind of do right now. I have some thing at my parents place, but nothing major. I have bed, couch, chairs, table, books, clothes, and other things here. I’m not hiding much of anything. I also just don’t like to accumulate things. I like being light and agile and ready to move at a moment’s notice. Maybe I just need to breathe. Things aren’t that bad. I don’t know why my mind is sort of blocking things in that regard. Just paint the damn walls already.

That nesting instinct still hasn’t kicked in yet. Some part of me feels like I’ll latch on to some other ship at some point in the near future, or that I’ll be forced to move somewhere else. I’ve made my mortgage payments on time, so I’m still good there. Maybe I’m worried that I’ll pick out the wrong color or model of something. Or that I’ll be stuck with some bad purchase. I’ve been known to be flustered by bad purchases and they just stick around somewhere in the basement.

That’s what’s frustrating me about my home internet. I wonder if my home value would go down if they found out that 1.5 mbps was the best that could be done. It’s frustrating. I know it sounds like a first world problem, but then you got to remember that lots of things are on the internet: maps, forms, directions, communication, entertainment. Yeah, I like getting off every once in a while, but it’s frustrating when those things don’t work the way wanted them to.

My neighbors haven’t been as noisy, but I still haven’t really met most of them. I pass some of them and say hi, but no one has really made the effort to chat for a little bit. That’s a little weird to me. It would be nice to get to know the people who live in the same building. I guess that might happen at some point. I don’t think anyone’s living in the apartment across from mine. There was a cranky looking woman who popped into the building and then into that apartment. It was just really weird.

Things are ok, I guess. I’m not lonely. I have beer (thanks Jack). I’m still (relatively) healthy and entertained. It’s pretty good as far as bachelor standards go.