The week in quotes

“My mum is going to google if this plane has enough fuel to get to Philadelphia, I just told her it seems a bit small. “- It is better to be safe than sorry.

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At Philadelphia Airport between a passenger and a ground steward:

“Do I have time to pick up a coffee?”

“Well ma’am, we would like you to board.”

“But I thought the flight is not scheduled to leave for another 30 min.”

“Yes ma’am, but we prefer you to be on the plane before we leave.

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“I can’t do this!” (part 1)- Sura while leaving the car park trying to get to grips with the automatic.

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“Are you together?”(part 1) The Victoria Secret sales lady who refused to believe my cup size and is now measuring me, to Sura who is standing so close behind me, it could indeed be deemed inappropriate.

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“I wonder what logo a designer would have on the Walk of Fame” – Sura who despite me informing her to keep an eye out for the star of Michael J Fox, spent an hour trying to find the star for Marc Jacobs. Miscommunication happens in the best of families.

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“What? In there?!” – burst bubble reaction when the Kodak theatre, the home of the Oscar festivities seemed a bit well… small.

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“It is 8:25pm”- day two, after having fought jet-lag all day. We were asleep 8:30pm.

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“Can I see your ID please?” – anywhere, anytime when alcohol was involved. Some cashier couldn’t find my date of birth on my driving licence and refused to sell me on the date that the document was given out:

“Er sorry, that says 2008.”

“That would make me 2. The date of birth is actually above that.”

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“Do we check in here?”

“Yes ma’am the line starts there.”

– One of the five receptionists points at a random spot in an empty foyer of our Vegas Hotel, letting us wait until someone else notices us.

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Concierge who helped us to Le Reve (“That is dream in French.”) tickets about Vegas: “Well, I guess there are worse places to live.”

Sura: “Yes, I used to live in Angola.”

Concierge: “Oh. I was more thinking, the couple before you – they were from Nebraska…”

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“I collect really rare plants.”

Ben, the New Zealander demonstrating a really bad pick up line in a Vegas club.

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“Hi! What time are you checking out?”- cleaning lady ringing our bell, she had to check at 9am to see who was checking out. Even though we requested a late check out at 1am at the reception.

“No no! Just that it takes me by surprise, like… like… a black man with an English accent…”

Right, you can stop digging that hole now.

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“It’s 7am girls!”

Above host again after insisting we stayed the night, losing the plot kicking us out at 6:42am, our eyes still adjusting to the light as the engine started.

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To an old friend who happened to be in LA:

“It is so nice to see you! How have you been? Would you like a drink?

“Oh actually, I just came out of rehab.”

Crap, maybe we shouldn’t have met in a bar.

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“Dolphins!” while walking on the beach from Santa Monica to Venice.

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“Roast chicken with rosemary and garlic, mash potato and spinach on the side.” If you ever go to Kate’s in Beverly Hills that is what you shall have.

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“I doubt a lot of things about myself, my ability to write is not one of them.” – my Aha- moment during conversation with a screenwriter took even me by surprise. Six months ago I would rather have died a death by paper cuts than utter these words.

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“This is disgusting.”- sip of really bad wine left by the previous (French!)occupant of the apartment: five days with Sura and my wine knowledge has improved.

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On Halloween costume picking with cousin:

“Sura will be a bunny and I will be a cat.”

His wife shouting from the other room: “A slutty cat.”

I prefer the adjective cute.

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“Are you together?” part 2, our new friend who kindly lend us his apartment for two days. Erh no. I think that in intoxicated state I might have even suggested that the love of ‘rooster’stops us… Oh dear.

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Theme of the week: “What/When/Where shall we eat?” “Are you hungry?/ I am hungry” “Should we eat first?” and all variations on above, get your priorities straight.