Note to Tony Parker

This is to apologize for the unsportsmanlike conduct and downright cruelty of the Oakland Tribune sports page editors who expressed happiness in connection with your recent leg injury. They ran a big headline today (December 19, 2013) that said “Nice Timing for Spurs’ Visit.” The subhed said “San Antonio will be missing Parker.” A photo of you on the floor in pain after suffering a shin contusion accompanied the story by Matt Schwab.

As an East Bay resident and Warriors’ fan, I want to see us beat the Spurs at their best, and that means with you at the point. And when I say “see,” I mean on TV, listening to Jim Barnett analyze the game. Barnett has been with the Warriors’ organization for decades, for sure he’s a partisan; but I can’t imagine him saying he was glad a player on another team was hurt. Jim Barnett radiates decency.

Another thing I don’t understand is why the Warriors and other NBA teams sell wands for the fans sitting behind the baskets to wave as visual distractions when the visiting team is shooting foul shots. Sometimes the camera catches these morons waving their wands… In the playground where I come from (Brooklyn B.G.), the bratty kids were admonished, they were told to “Play fair.” In gym class we were supposedly taught “sportsmanship.”

Here are some other principles we were taught that the men who run the United States have violated:

Don’t hit somebody when they’re down.

Don’t lie.

Pick on somebody your own size. Don’t pick on somebody smaller.

Mother knows best Respect your mom and motherhood per se.

Don’t be a sissy —don’t imagine or overreact to threats.

Don’t start the fight —don’t draw first, as in High Noon et al— but defend yourself.

Don’t shoot a man in the back. (Gen. McCaffrey ordered the slaughter of retreating Iraqi soldiers.)

“You asked for it.” (Expect retaliation when you hurt somebody.)

“Prove it!” (Innocent till proven guilty)

At my neighborhood courts I watched Lenny Wilkens, Connie Hawkins, and Tony Jackson, among other great hoopsters. But the best of them all was Tommy Davis, who went on to play outfield for the Dodgers after they moved to L.A. Strangely believe it.