To be fair, Admiral Mullen’s name is Michael, but as the article points out Michelle’s name simply fits better. Plus, the President did have a subtly awkward pause for a second after saying it — gotcha!

Keep in mind too that TOTUS decided not to appear at this event, having the President rely on mere notes instead of the warm steady hand of his ever-present political soul-mate and confidant. Hmm…

In truth, I see TOTUS’ absence as a blatant attempt by TOTUS to try to sabotage Barack and Michelle’s relationship. Mr. President, your heart can’t belong to two people forever without there being consequences. Look deep into your soul, Mr. President, and please let one of them go for the sake of yourself and the country.