WWDC roundup: Apple’s latest Microsoft jokes

“PC” posing as Apple CEO Steve Jobs.Posting from San Francisco: Apple’s Worldwide Developers Conference wouldn’t be complete without a few lighthearted jabs at Microsoft, and today’s Steve Jobs keynote didn’t disappoint in that regard. It started with a video take-off on Apple’s popular Mac vs. PC ads. John Hodgman, the PC character, appeared on the screen in Jobs’ trademark jeans and black mock turtleneck.

“I’m Steve Jobs,” PC said. “That’s right, it’s me. Chief executive of Apple Inc. One Infinite Loop, Cupertino, Calif., 95014. I know the address. That’s how you know it’s me. I’ve got some big news this year. I want the whole world to hear it: I quit. That’s right, I’m resigning, effective immediately, and what’s more, I’m shutting down all of Apple. I know this comes as a surprise to all of you, but if you think about it, you’ll see I really didn’t have a choice. I mean, Vista has been performing so well. Sold tens of dozens of copies. … And then, I got my iPod killer. The Zune … brown. I’m sure you’d agree that it’s time for Apple to wave the white flag and concede defeat to the boys up in Redmond, Washington.”

He continued, but then the Mac character came out and put a stop to it.

Subsequent jokes included Phil Schiller, Apple’s senior vice president of marketing, demonstrating a new iChat feature by digitally inserting his mouth in the place of Steve Ballmer’s mouth in a picture of the Microsoft chief executive.

“I love my Mac!” Schiller made Ballmer say.

And later Jobs poked fun at Microsoft’s multi-tiered Windows Vista pricing structure by jokingly “introducing” various versions of Mac OS X Leopard — Basic, Premium, Enterprise and Ultimate. In reality, they were all the same version, at the same price: $129.

On a more serious note, in addition to announcing plans to offer its Safari browser for Windows, Apple sought to address calls by developers to open up the iPhone to third-party software by detailing how they could use Safari as an avenue for Web-based applications for the phone.

Jobs spent the bulk of his keynote talking about 10 features of Leopard, which is slated for October release after a previously announced delay. They included new Mac file-sharing capabilities and new Mac desktop features, including one called Stacks that puts quickly expandable folders into the dock at the bottom of the screen, which now sits on more of a three-dimensional platform to make it stand out. Jobs also showed a file preview function called Quick Look, and a way to browse computer files using the Cover Flow capability introduced in iTunes.