Friday, August 23, 2013

I Wouldn't Let Go

So here's the thing. I haven't let go. That is, until a few days ago. If you read my story about the ordeal with Owen, then you are all caught up. He started shaking. I called the Doctor, she feared seizures and sent us to the ER. We waited and waited to see a neurologist and after seeing one we were told Owen was self soothing. All should be better, right? It should. But I wouldn't let go.

I wouldn't let go.

I let fear win. I let fear take over my emotions. I let fear disrupt my family. I let fear dictate my thoughts and actions. I shouldn't have. We saw multiple Doctors and had tests run and all came back fine, but I didn't want to believe that. A dear friend knew I was struggling with letting go of my fear and called to say, "Trust. Trust what the Doctors are saying. We prayed for answers and a clear report for Owen and you got that. Now trust it." After listening to that message and thinking about it for the next few days I realized I was choosing fear. Every morning, I would wake up and choose it, and carry it with me the whole day. I would let fear weigh me down.

God walks us through trials and when we're on the other side, we have a choice. We can rejoice in the Lord and thank Him for bringing us through. Or, do what I did. Choose fear. Hold onto doubt and worry, let anxiousness overwhelm our hearts and minds.

So today, instead of carrying fear of "What if" I will rejoice in the victory.

I am continually in awe of your heart to hear God and move forward in the truths and insights He gives you! Thank you for sharing this powerful message. It is one I needed when i was at your stage of life, and one I will need again and again as I face new challenges, changes and seasons of life. I love you, Sam!

About Me

I'm Sam, This is my blog. I am doing my best to be a great wife and mom. Life is hard, and I'm learning as I go. God is bigger and continues to teach me things wherever I'm at and in every situation. My goal is to be real all the time, and hopefully encourage you to feel free to be whoever you need to be. Let's just Live in Love.
"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them." 1 John 4:16