Of all the tales that the depths of the ocean contain, this one is quite shallow. Disney’s latest installment in the swashbuckling franchise Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell no Tales proves that neither changing directors, writers, nor the inclusion of an undead Javier Bardem, can bail enough water out of a sinking ship. No doubt the next chapter in the life and times of Jack Sparrow was one to be anticipated by fans, but sadly the writing was not strong or developed enough to carry the waning film series. This film reminds me of the Child’s Play franchise. What??? That is likely what you’re saying. But hear me out. After the first two Chucky films, the studio realized that the series was not working as a hard horror film, so the studio went the camp route and capitalized on the ridiculousness of the characters and the situations. Dead Men Tell No Tales contains many camp elements such as completely ludicrous antics and escapes that are even too much for a Mission Impossible movie. Although there is an attempt at some closure between characters at the end of the film, it plays out as forced and on-the-nose. Still, there are moments that will mildly tug at your heartstrings during the showdown, but it’s not enough to add any dimension to this flat tale. One thing that this Pirates movie has going for it is the impressive visual effects. Both the editing and score are pretty outstanding, and certainly add to the experience of the film. However, if you watch the movie in 3D, as I did because there wasn’t a 2D option at the earliest showing, some of the magic of the undead pirates will be lost due to noticeability of editing. Over all, Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is a great popcorn movie and a fun one to watch with friends or the family. Be sure to stay after the credits for a sneak peek at the next (and hopefully last) one.

Return to the swashbuckling world of the franchise inspired by the iconic Pirates of the Caribbean attraction at Disney Parks! Many years after the encounter with Davy Jones, Jack Sparrow (Depp) is being sought out by a young Henry Turner (Brenton Thwaites)–yes, that Turner. After witnessing his entire ship’s compliment slaughtered by ghost pirates led by Captain Salazar (Bardem), Turner is even more determined to find Captain Jack. Unbeknownst to Turner, Jack Sparrow’s fortune is not what it used to be. With his luck turned sour, Sparrow is captured and Turner must free him if the ghost pirates are to be stopped and the curse of Davy Jones lifted. By sheer happenstance, Sparrow is sentenced to die alongside an accused witch named Carina (Kaya Scodelario). If that wasn’t bad enough, Captain Barbosa (Rush) has been cornered by Salazar into leading him to Sparrow as well. Other than a need to find Jack, Turner, Salazar, and Carina all share a common interest in locating the trident of Poseidon. That trident is the key to unlocking the power of the ocean and breaking curses.

Like so many franchises that have come before, Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean appears to have suffered the same fate. Although this can’t be said of every franchise, the area that fairly consistently fails to deliver is strong writing inclusive of plot and character development. Often times it seems that story is exchanged for merchandising, impressive visual effects, or pandering in longstanding franchises. After an outstanding opening sequence that instantly hooks you, the rest of the movie just plays out so paint-by-the-numbers that it becomes nearly predictable and lacks any real substance. Sometimes franchises fall into the trap of realizing that it can no longer take itself seriously and allows the camp factor to increase significantly. That is the one word that pretty much sums up this film: camp. Whether you are talking the perpetually drunk Jack Sparrow (yes, even more than usual), unbelievable escapes that defy all logic and past precedents set is previous films, or the supernatural playing off more as a joke than a serious plot device, there are many elements in this film that attempt to cover up poor writing by going for the flash in a pan approach.

One of the down sides to the recent Guardians of the Galaxy I found was the film only focusing on Acts I and III, leaving out the chunk of story development typically found in Act II. By the same token, Dead Men Tell No Tales spends most of the time in Act II, leaving Act I and again Act III to be rushed through. The common variable in both scenarios is a weak third act. To explain where I feel that this movie should have ended and the next one begin would give away a plot spoiler, so I won’t mention it. However, there is a place in this film in which there is a great opportunity to end this story on a high note of anticipation of what is to come but it just rushes through the rest of the story. Had more time been spent on developing a solid story, then this Pirates movie would definitely have turned out much better. Sadly, it seems like more time was spent in post-production and scoring the film. Certainly, the talent behind the lead characters is excellent. Perhaps the writing is poor and the screenplay was weak, but with a lead cast of Depp, Rush, and Bardem, the movie is fun to watch. And sometimes that’s all you want–a good popcorn movie.

If you ARE looking for a good popcorn movie to watch with your family or friends over the holiday weekend, then checkout Disney’s Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales. Can’t promise that you will enjoy the story as much as the original, but you’ll still have a good time. Perhaps the sequel to this film will be stronger and pick up where this one failed to deliver.