(NIGHT) 22

This time when I woke up it was morning and Mischa was still in her bed next to me. I smiled as I sat up and leaned over her brushing her hair out of her face and kissing her forehead. It was a good dream but it was time for me to go back to the real world. The first step was going home. I found some paper and left a note telling Mischa that I was going home and with luck I would see her later today. Then I took off leaving the house and heading home.

I came in the house and I saw them all in the living room talking and chatting happily. I walked in and saw that Aunt May was back in the house. Her face was wrapped up in bandages only letting her eyes show and when she looked at me there was only fear in her eyes. Fear of me. The aunt that once was happy and proud to call me her nephew feared me.

Father had his own bandage from when I slapped him with the guitar and from the wounds that he had caused the others it was starting to look like World War III had went down in this house. My mother looked at me seeing that I wasn’t Dian and took a large swallow of the drink she had in her hand. I saw that she moved on from wine to Vodka. And so it begins again.

I was losing my mind, father was kicking our asses, mother was drunk out of her mind, and my brother and sisters walked around as if this was just another normal fucking day in the Robertson house. I laughed to myself because in truth this was just another normal day in our family. Seamus and Lilly didn’t seem to be enjoying this. They thought they were going to be given a free pass. I saw the swollen lip on Seamus and I was sure it was because after saying something father punched him in his mouth. It was nice to see that at last Seamus wasn’t above getting knocked down either.

Lilly was looking broken and scared and alone in this house of cards. In this house of horrors. I was just proud that the latest things that haunted them weren’t me. I wasn’t home and I was dealing with my own problems. All the wounds they had right now not counting Aunt May was not caused by my hand. It was not by my doing that they were just as damage as I was.

But of course I knew that already. I knew that I wasn’t the only damaged thing in this house. I knew that Ian wasn’t the only broken person that hides under this roof. I looked down at Angel who was the only person that seemed happy to see me walking in that wobbling way that babies had as he reached me. I picked him up and all eyes were on me as if I was going to hurt him. As if I was going to harm my brother. Billy maybe but I liked Angel. He saw my darkness and I saw his as well. He laughed and giggled as I held him in my hand pulling at my hair and moving around in my arm.

“Where were you?” Father asked me and my eyes went over to him. He was questioning me. After everything that we went through I thought that he would have been happy that I was gone for the night. “Did you hurt anyone?”

“Just you.” I hissed out and he frowned at me as if I wasn’t supposed to remind me that I was the reason why he was in pain right now. And I knew that he was in pain right now.

“Ian please just tell us where you were?” Uncle Joe said and I looked over at him wondering if I should bit and just tell him what he wanted to know. Or if I wanted to string him along. Make them guess where I spent my night. Make them work for it. I was in this house for all of five minutes and already I wish I would have stayed in bed with Mischa. At least there I was welcome and wanted.

“I was with a friend.” I said and they all looked at me like I couldn’t have friends. I rolled my eyes because they had a point but still someone should tell these people that it’s rude to judge.