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Wednesday, December 6, 2017

DC Holiday Special 2017 #1 Review and **SPOILERS**

Holiday Anxiety

Written By: See belowArt By: See below

Lettered By: See below

Cover By: Alex Antone & Dave Wielgosz

Cover Price: $9.99

On Sale Date: December 6, 2017

**NON SPOILERS AND SCORE AT THE BOTTOM**

Them sleigh
bells jing-jing-jing-a-ling, uh, ting-tang-ting-a-ling loo…we’re gonna make our
merry and, um, pop our cherries with you…okay, I’ll level with you: I don’t know a lot of the “peppier” Christmas
songs very well. Primarily because I hate all Christmas music. So whatever I’ve
heard has been on television or in department stores or in some horrible school
play where I was forced to sing “O Christmas Tree” so the gymnasium could get
new mats. But that doesn’t mean I’m not filled to the brim with holiday cheer!
How could I not, when my review of DC
Holiday Special 2017 #1 is right here?

Explain
It!

“The
Reminder”Writer:
Jeff LemirePencils:
Giuseppe CamuncoliInks: Cam
SmithColors:
Tomeu MoreyLetters: Clayton
CowlesThis here’s the bookend story, a device to explain
the ten yarns about to be presented. The presenter is Bibbo, who ejects an
unruly John Constantine from his bar and explains to a despondent Clark Kent
that heroism is abundant or something or other. I loved seeing Bibbo, and
Lemire wrote a pretty good Constantine. The gimmick is good enough to force an
anthology, though it really could have been anything. Later, Clark invites John
to his house to celebrate the holidays with Lois and Jon, which is pretty
funny.

7 of 10
candy canes

“Twas the
Night Before Christmas”Writer:
Denny O’Neil

Artist:
Steve Epting

Colors:
Dave McCaig

Letters:
Deron BennettA new Batman
story by Denny O’Neil turns out to be a little crazy, and doesn’t do much to
instill the reader with Christmas cheer. A man is spurned on by the ghost of
his vengeful grandmother to get revenge for her untimely and rude demise.
Batman hops in at the last moment and saves the day. The art is phenomenal, and
people should be talking about this blocky design of the Batmobile for the next
couple of days. This story, however, is not very festive.

6.5 of 10
mistletoe

“You Better
Think Twice”Writer:
Mairghread Scott

Pencils:
Phil Hester

Inks: Ande
Parks

Colors:
Trish Mulvihill

Letters:
Clem RobinsOllie and Dinah are headed out as Mr. and Mrs. Claus
to dispense presents to some lonely orphans, Ollie dressed as Green Arrow with
a Santa suit over it, Dinah dressed as Black Canary…but in a Mrs. Claus dress
and wig, which means you can’t tell she’s Black Canary. Should have sprung for
that domino mask! Canary is all “bah humbug,” but after impressing the orphans
by beating the snot out of some thugs trying to steal their toys, she realizes
that the true joy of Christmas is in the over-compliance of children.

5.5 of 10
snowmen

“Going Down
Easy!”Writer: Tom
King

Artist:
Francesco Francavilla

Letterer:
Clem RobinsSgt. Rock? Really? Here we have the Sarge telling us
the story of a Jewish fella and his Nazi POW separated from the rest of his
group while he slowly bleeds out. After breaking each others balls for eight
days and nights (where have I heard that before?) the Nazi seems to get the
upperhand, but gets killed with the Jewish guy’s last breath. And then Santa
spread joy to all the children throughout the land! I’m not even sure that this
takes place in the month of December. Love that Francavilla art, though, I
might consider reading a Sgt. Rock series
if he’d draw it.

6 of 10
menorahs

“Hope for
the Holidays”Writer:
Joshua Williamson

Artist: Neil
Googe

Colors:
Ivan Plascencia

Letters:
Tom NapolitanoThat Barry Allen is always on the go, he doesn’t even
have time to spend the holidays with his nephew Wally at Titans Tower. Swinging
by an airport, he learns that everyone’s stranded due to the freak snowstorm.
So, being the good guy he is, Flash runs everyone home. Then he ends up
drinking a Hot Toddy or something with Wally because he realized the true
meaning of etc. et cetera. This is more the caliber of story I expected from
this comic book, but that doesn’t make it interesting.

6 of 10
elves on shelves

“A Wilson
Family Christmas”Story:
Priest

Pencils:
Tom Grummett

Inks: Scott
Hanna

Color:
Jeromy Cox

Lettering:
Willie SchubertThis is a pretty funny story about Slade Wilson aka
Deathstroke doing his business while he still had a family. A hectoring wife
and two bratty sons before they became the Ravager and Jericho. It’s a series
of moments that will make you chuckle, and an awkward ending that will make you
laugh out loud. Not exactly Rudolph the
Red-Nosed Reindeer, but there’s still plenty of red.

8.5 of 10 partridges in a pear tree

“Silent
Night Atomic Knights”Writer: Dan
DiDio

Pencils:
Matthew Clark

Inks: Sean
Parsons & Matthew Clark

Colors: Rob
Schwager

Letters:
Travis LanhamAtomic Knights? Atomic
Knights? Hoo boy…here’s a short and sweet story that takes too many pages
to tell: plant-based lifeforms the Trefoils, one-time enemies, then allies, are
converging on the humans and they feel threatened. Turns out they just wanted
to form a giant Christmas tree. We get to see some Matthew Clark artwork, which
is always appreciated, but this story is what we can call today “Kirby wank.”

5.5 of 10
dreidels

“Holiday
Spirit”Writer:
Shea Fontana

Artist:
Otto Schmidt

Letterer:
Carlos M. MangualThe Teen Titans are splitting up to their respective
homes for the holidays, except for Starfire who doesn’t understand frivolities
all of a sudden. When the Ghost of Christmas Past is unleashed to make people
relive their past Christmases guilty moments, Starfire is immune because she
doesn’t go for that commercialized nonsense. In saving her team, she learns the
true meaning of Christmas is to not celebrate the holiday, thereby leaving
yourself invulnerable to ethereal emotion vampires. But hey, a full story drawn
by Otto Schmidt! I’ll take that where I can get it.

6.5 of 10
cups of egg nog

“In the
Echo of the Abyss”Writer:
Scott Bryan Wilson

Artist: Nic
Klein

Letterer:
Tom NapolitanoA group of scientists aboard the space station Archer
find themselves potentially stranded forever when the world below is poised for
nuclear war. One scientist, driven mad by the experience, produces some frozen
mistletoe before running off to sabotage the space station and save everyone
from starving to death. Swap Thing emerges from the mistletoe and calms the
loony bird’s mind, even affixing him to the wall before dropping a load of
vegetables and bouncing. Hooray! Everyone worked out okay. Uh, expect for the
inhabitants of planet Earth, I guess. Really nice art and plotting in this one.

6.5 of 10 Santa
Claus beards

“Solstice”Writer:
Greg Rucka

Artist:
Bilquis Evely

Colors:
Romulo Fajardo Jr.

Letters:
Dave SharpeAfter juxtaposing Batman saving a mother from being
mugged in front of her child and Wonder Woman delivering a tanker of fresh
water to the displaced folks in Puerto Rico, Dianaand Bruce meet up to light a
bonfire as part of a yearly tradition. Seems they both share a more intimate
relationship to the darkness, so must be continually reminded of the light. Or
some such. Look at some nice Bilquis Evely artwork and keep it moving.

6 of 10
fruit cakes

“The Silent
Night of the Batman”Writer:
Mike Friedrich

Artists:
Neal Adams and Dick GiordanoHere’s a classic holiday story from Batman #219 (February 1970), wherein
there is no crime in Gotham City for one night, even while Batman sings carols
with the some vocal cops at the police department. Almost worth it just to see
that wacky Neal Adams block lettering! But not quite.

6 of 10 one
horse open sleighs

Bits and
Pieces:

A strange collection of stories, most related to the holiday season only tangentially. Some of the tales are downright morbid. Which, come to think of it, reflects Christmas at my house pretty well. The price point is prohibitive.

1 comment:

"The price point is prohibitive." You're being kind. The price point is F'ing ridiculous. It's a damn shame I'll miss out on Sgt. Rock drawn by my favorite artist, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna throw down TEN BUCKS for a floppy cover book. That's edging into friggin' trade territory. If DC expects me to toss them a Hamilton for a comic, they need to at LEAST put a stiff cover and square back on it. BAH F'ING HUMBUG!

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