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We surely don’t want to be trapped in a dreadful situation when our toddlers cry heavily, scream their hearts out, and lie down kicking on the floor in the middle of a solemn celebration or in the midst of happy social gatherings. But tantrums can just happen anytime most especially during the most unpredictable moments.

Despite the dread characterizing tantrums, I urge you to see the positive side of this seemingly uncontrollable behavior. Here are some of the most beautiful reasons why you should accept the normalcy of tantrums:

1. Tantrums relieve your children’s emotional stress.

What do you feel when you are harboring resentment in your heart? How heavy does your soul become? By knowing how toxic containing our emotions can be, then we can better accept the need for our children’s cries.

These little kids need to have an avenue for venting out their emotions. When we force to stop them from telling us that they are extremely upset or discouraged, then we also allow the further growth of stress hormones in their system. Tantrums are our children’s way of showing that their immature hearts cannot contain the sadness that they feel.

2. Tantrums make your children normal human beings.

Do you agree that we live in a sometimes cruel world? Most people expect us to be happy at all times and behaving at our best even when situations are terrible and awful. Some parents are even shamed and criticized for dealing with stressful situations in a manner that deviates from society’s high expectations.

Tantrums only prove that our children are normal human beings – they can lose their cool, they can be overly sad, they can feel rejected, they can be disappointed, and they can show how they are without being constrained by what other people could think of them.

If you managed to not buy everything that your children asked you to buy at the mall, then congratulations! If you had the courage to get the handful of candies and chocolates from your kids, then great! You are doing the right thing as a parent.

Most children throw tantrums because of certain triggers such as not having what they want or being stopped from particular activities. Since they haven’t developed to their full maturity yet, we can expect that tantrums could be their means to overcome rejections.

When your children throw tantrums because of these reasons, resist the urge to suddenly change your mind. Don’t give in to their demands. Instead, allow them to cry but offer a soothing embrace. This will soon let them know that throwing tantrums is not the answer to their disappointments.

4. Tantrums give you a parenting challenge.

Challenges are nice to have from time to time. But what’s good in dealing with tantrums is that it tests your patience and stimulates your empathy towards your children. But with every circumstance, you have the responsibility to rise up victorious from all challenges. And victory is not measured when your child stops from crying. Victory is determined by how you dealt with the problem and how you were able to show your love even during the most stressful situations.

For more than two years, your child could have been solely under your care. She may be used to just staying at home either alone with her toys or playing with her siblings. But you must know that she cannot stay at home forever. She has to explore the world and start learning about broader possibilities. So how do you prepare your child for preschool?

Here are some of the most effective tips to let your child become physically, emotionally, and mentally ready for preschool:

1. Talk to your child about the need for preschool

Communication is the key to healthy relationships. Even when your child seems to be so young for serious talks, you should still make an effort to explain to her that going to preschool is necessary. Give her ideas about how exciting preschool could be. Describe to her the fun of meeting new friends, singing nursery rhymes, and playing outside.

2. Use the preschool concept during pretend play

You surely know how children love pretend play activities. If you are running out of new ideas for your pretend play at home, then it is now the time to consider having a preschool pretend play concept. You could first act out as the teacher and your child as a student. The roles could interchange every day depending on your goals.

Set up a preschool corner at home that is equipped with a study table, chair, puzzle mat, coloring materials, and more. Make sure that your pretend play will have a similar schedule to the preschool format. There must be a designated time for singing, circle time, story-telling, snack time, and free play.

3. Read books about school

When you go to the bookstore, you can choose the books that are about school or where the story’s setting is in the school. This can stimulate the interest in school in your child’s mind. It is also a creative way of giving her a subconscious idea about how children should behave in school.

4. Visit the preschool.

Anything that is strange can stress out a child. You do not want your child to feel worried because of a new environment. It would be wonderful if you can frequently bring your little one to the preschool a few weeks before the actual start of the school year. Talk to the management if you can let her play for a few minutes at the yard or if you could just spend some time roaming around.

5. Schedule playdates with other children.

If your kid isn’t used to spending time with other children, then you have to introduce the idea of a social group to her. You could speak with other moms in your circle of friends or in your neighborhood to have a series of playdates among children. Carefully plan out the activities for your playdate so that every moment during the session can be a meaningful opportunity for learning and growth.

6. Meet the teacher.

The teachers of your child will be her second parents while in school. Your little one must feel comfortable with her teachers and even with the other personnel of the school. Schedule a meeting with the teacher where she can speak with you and your child. During the meeting, you must be able to relay all the necessary information about your child such as her behavioral nuances and medical condition.

Going to preschool is another milestone for your child. Be sure to make the process as fun as possible. Use all your creativity and exercise your patience during this transition.

It can be very frustrating to ask your child over and over again to complete their chores without them ever getting done. If this describes your house to a tee, consider designing a chore chart. Chores might include taking out the garbage, doing the dishes, cleaning their room, yard work or putting laundry in the laundry room. Each chore has to be done just once or twice a week. Anything more is unrealistic. After your child completes each chore, they can put a check mark on the chore chart. At the end of each week, it’s very inspiring for both parent and child to look at the chore chart and easily see that each designated job was completed. Just like our ‘to do’ lists, your child will find great satisfaction in being able to check off each chore as it’s completed and take pride knowing they accomplished a set task or list of tasks.

Once you’ve sat down with your child and discussed and designed a chore chart, it’s time to discuss the rewards for accomplishing each task listed. Perhaps at your home you decide you will give a set sum for each task accomplished. If you should decide to grant your child some sort of monetary allowance, make sure it’s age appropriate and granted on a regular basis. A good rule of thumb is 50 cents per year of age. So your 8 year old child would earn $4.00 per week if each chore on the list has been completed. If it has not been, they do not receive their allowance.

This is a great opportunity for you to teach your children the value of both earning and saving money, and also giving back. Perhaps the child can divide their allowance into thirds: 1/3 to spend, 1/3 to save, and 1/3 to use to help those less fortunate than themselves. You might also want to consider designing a ‘bank book’ for each portion of the allowance and tuck each into three separate coffee cans or money jars, and that way you and your child will be able to keep track of how much has been saved, how much has been spent, and how much of their allowance has gone to help someone else.

Should you decide to use non-monetary incentives as chores payment, be sure you set clear parameters for your child. Be sure they understand that two hours each weekend of their favorite video game or going to see a movie with mom or dad is only earned by completing the chore list successfully each week. You might want to consider writing these on a slip of paper as ‘currency’ for the child to keep in their ‘privilege bank’ and they can cash it in with you when they’d like.

Regardless of the method you choose, keep in mind this can be a valuable tool for both you and your child.