Tabloid Hell: Pete Wentz to be a daddy?

The American tabloids are buzzing with the rumours today (July 18) that Fall Out Boy’s not-the-singer-actually Pete Wentz is engaged and about to be a father.

This wouldn’t be such monumental news in gossip-world except for the fact that his wife-to-be is none other than Ashlee Simpson – the certainly-not-cosmetically-enhanced mall punkette.

If the rumours are true, we can only imagine the kid will be a miming, Kohl-loving diva with serious body issues. Boy or girl.

According to the reports: “(They) got engaged just before the band played at New York’s Live Earth (July 7) concert and are currently expecting a baby!”

A “source” says: “Ashlee wasn’t expecting it at all, it was a total surprise…Pete whipped out a big engagement ring, dropped down on one knee and asked Ashlee to be his bride. Ashlee sayas it was romantic, sexy – and that she said yes right away.”

Perhaps she heard: “Will you mime for me?”

Apparently speculation was sparked that she was preggers started when she “was wandering around rubbing her belly, and she refused to drink anything” – Pah! Who needs a pregnancy test?