Not In The Cards of Life

Do you ever feel that happiness wasn’t a card that was dealt to your pile of cards for life? Or that maybe you were given more fear, sad, or depression cards than happy? Maybe we were dealt the same amount of all our cards and we have dropped a few or used them out of sorts and used them up to fast. So now all you are left with are the sorrow or unhappiness. The cards of hard heartache and hard times.

I try to be positive, I try to believe that there is more than this and that things are going to get better. Like in my last post of meeting someone and just being a family. Or getting a decent job, being able to make bills and do things with the kids, be there for the kids and not have to worry about their dad being in the picture or helping. But then I feel those kind of things don’t happen to someone like me. That even if I find a decent job it won’t last they never do. Or what if I do meet someone or end up with one of the guys I have been talking to. It last for a while or a little bit. It won’t be a happy ending because something will end up messing it up. Feel that even moving won’t change much just a different area with the same struggle.

Or maybe like my friend said find someone decent and the struggles will work theirselves out. But even then is it going to last?