Movie Reviews By Bil Antoniou

The Relic

Lame horror flick from Peter Hyams about a giant mythical creature that takes over a museum. Never frightening in the least bit, what this film lacks in suspense it makes up for in noise: the amount of stomping, roaring and smashing that this creature does is unbelievable. Penelope Ann Miller plays the museum scientist who has no idea what is going on under her nose until it’s too late, and Tom Sizemore shows up as the beefy cop ready to save the day. Soon it gets to be pretty annoying that the film has written in a brainy, brilliant female character but doesn’t allow her to do anything more than scream every time she’s in a room; is this the progress we’ve had since the 1950s B-movies where damsels in white were attacked by giant foam spiders? Don’t bother with this one, you can pretty much divine the whole plot from the synopsis on the video box.