Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Today, well right now really, is a sad moment for me. I don't know maybe I expect too much from people and the fact that I can be passive aggressive doesn't help, but I hate losing friends. Especially when you are someone that I honestly feel as if I would have laid down my life to save if needed.

I may be passive aggressive but I strive not to be a liar. Heck the second time I met my now husband i explained how I was married but we were getting divorced( think X had a new place the next month) and that I had a young son. I laid all my cards in the table. I even told Bob about how Larry SO didn't deserve me. He is/was a genuinely good guy, but honestly within 20. Mins of first seeing Bob I just knew we were right for each other ... And I still feel like Bob is my soulmate. Eight years of marriage on Feb 18th! I went off on a tangent.

This friendship is in tattered ruins; I really don't feel as if I'm at fault for. This is something super serious that I kept quite about for over a year even if I feel as if I was being punished from almost the 2nd or 3rd day I was told by a certain person what happened. Really though a person who says point blank they will lie if the truth is exposed?? Iloved this person so much and was like my own sibling..

There are times in the past I regret my actions. Such as not telling Sarah straight up when I was getting burned out and how I actually felt about certain actions she took made me feel (not bad actions just not what I wanted to have happen. Really how fair is that though to just expect her to know how I feel?)

This situation however I feel as if I finally did the right thing. Where I want to be in my life is something I strive towards each day. By keeping this secret until a couple of weeks ago I created stress In My own life now the truth is told but my friendship is long over.