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Social Distancing: A Philosopher’s Perspective

April 23, 2020

We are certainly living in unprecedented times, but what would some of history’s greatest minds think?

Talia Argondezzi, director of Ursinus’s writing and speaking program, reconsidered insights from noted philosophers and reshaped some of their most well-known words into reflections on the COVID-19 pandemic for the humor blog mcsweeneys.net.

For example, Descartes’s “I think, therefore I am” became “I was so lonely and disoriented, I started doubting the reality of everything, even myself. But if I didn’t exist, then how could I already have over a dozen subscribers on Spotify? I started a podcast this month, therefore I am.”

And if Kierkegaard were to respond to his own, “Angst, the constant anxiety that is a defining feature of the human condition, stems from our consciousness of the unfettered freedom to choose,” in April 2020, he’d likely say, “Great point, former me! Turns out when you have no choices, all your anxiety just melts away like snow in spring, or like glaciers in any season. That’s why this past month has been so existentially carefree!”