The 15 Dumbest Places to Eat

The Magic Restroom

This Los Angeles toilet-themed restaurant is the perfect spot for people who dream of eating crap out of the same place they crap. Just be careful not to accidentally pee in the wrong bowl.

Nyotaimori

This Japanese restaurant takes Nyotaimori — the act of eating sushi off a nearly naked lady's body — to the extreme by allowing a person to eat out of a human-shaped assemblage. Diners even get a scalpel to slice into the goodness. Jeffery Dahmer would have been a fan.

Café des Chats

Even people who love pets might be reluctant to eat at this Parisian café that's famous for being home to a dozen cats. Yes, that is a hair in your soup. It's a LOT of hairs.

Kayabukiya Tavern

Usually when people complain about the waitstaff monkeying around, it's not because they're actually monkeys. At this restaurant, monkeys serve customers hot towels before meals and take their drink orders in exchange for boiled soya beans as tips. And you thought calculating 18% in CASH was tough.

Heart Attack Grill

Only in America can a person eat at a restaurant that gives you a free meal if you're over 350 pounds. You'll be earning that in no time if you become a Heart Attack Grill regular: their menu items include a Double Bypass Burger and Flatliner Fries.

Ninja

Ninjas are awesome when they're kicking ass in a Quentin Tarantino film, but do you really want them serving you food? It's hard enough to flag down your waiter in a normal restaurant.

Dans le Noir? Paris

Dark dining, like that served up at Dan le Noir?, has been all the rage recently. Eating in the sensory deprivation of darkness is supposed to heighten your taste. Or maybe you should just stop eating out with such ugly people.

The Robot Restaurant

Eating at a restaurant with robot waiters may sound like a fun idea, but where is the human touch? Also, how cheap does a restaurant owner have to be to not want to shell out those huge below-minimum-wage waiter salaries??

Lainio Snow Village

The restaurant in Finland's Lainio Snow Village is made almost entirely of ice. It's probably not recommended that you send your meal back if it comes out cold.

Dinner in the Sky

Have you ever dreamed of eating dinner at a table suspended in the air by a giant crane? No? Well, at the very least, if you don't like your meal, it's easy to dispose of.

The Lock Up

With all the ambiance of a prison cell — because it is, in fact, designed to be a series of prison cells — The Lockup features a motion-sensitive man in an electric chair, secret passages and, for some reason, drinks served with syringes. It'll be your "last meal" (at this weird restaurant, probably).

S' Baggers

At this German restaurant, the tables spin, you order via computer and your food arrives via rollercoaster. It's the perfect family restaurant to remind you why you regret having to eat out with your family.

Barbie Café

At this Taiwan café, designed as a tribute to the doll it's named after, people can order food and purchase Mattel products — all in an ambiance that looks like a Pepto-Bismol monster vomited on the walls.

Disaster Café

At Spain's Disaster Café, diners get to "enjoy" the experience of a 7.8 magnitude earthquake as they eat. Hopefully, when you want the check, it arrives faster than the ones that get sent out by FEMA.

Ray's and Stark Bar

Ray's and Stark Bar, which opened in Los Angeles earlier this year, features a whopping selection of 20 different types of water — sold at prices up to $20 a pop. But what's the corkage fee if you bring your own Aquafina?