Setting Expectations

Are You Making The Right Impression In Your Work Clothes?

“I’m so jealous,” was the first thing he said to me as he shook my hand.

It was 8:00 in the morning, and I was barely awake when I walked into the large hotel ballroom in which I would be giving my talk. I sipped my much-needed cup of coffee as I walked across the cavernous room to meet the man who was emceeing the event and would be introducing me. It was an event of about 400 bankers, all representing various institutional banks from across the country. Everyone was in a suit, the men in ties — everyone except me. I wore what I usually wear: a button-down shirt and a pair of blue jeans.

The meaning of clothing

The man who was emceeing the event is an executive with one of the large banks. I held out my hand to shake his. “Nice to meet you,” I said. “I’m so jealous,” he replied as he shook my hand. “I have to wear a suit and tie. I’d be much happier wearing what you’re wearing. I have to wear a suit and tie every day, but I’m much more myself in what you’re wearing,” he said.

I’d never thought that my clothing would be the topic of conversation, especially with a corporate executive. But it got me thinking about how we use or misuse what we wear to set expectations.

What your appearance says about you

It's said that the clothes make the man. But it’s probably more accurate to say the clothes reflect the man. What we choose to wear says something about us. If we wear what we want to wear, we’re telling the world something about ourselves. When we dress up for the occasion or to impress someone, we’re not really giving an honest portrayal of ourselves; we’re dressing for the other person. This is the same as saying what we think others want to hear instead of saying what we actually believe. As soon as someone sees us, they will form a first impression of who we are based simply on how we’re dressed. This impression is important because it will often set expectations. It makes sense, then, that we should work to set the proper expectations.

A man who is more casual and laid-back is setting the wrong expectations when he wears a suit and tie. I understand that he or his company wants him to come across as “professional,” but then people will expect him to act that way. When I show up in jeans and a brightly colored watch, before anyone has heard me speak or exchanged any words with me, they know that I have a more relaxed demeanor and will likely offer a slightly different perspective on the world. And they got all that just from what I’m wearing.

The right personal branding

Companies spend millions to get their branding just right. Good branding accurately reflects the company’s real personality. Bad branding is when companies try to present themselves as something they are not. Harley-Davidson has good branding. So does Apple. So does Ralph Lauren. When we see their stores, when we see their marketing, it tells us something about who the company is, not who they are trying to be. Why should our personal branding — how we present ourselves — be any different?