Obviously comrades the only real solution to this war is right in front of you all. We must enter into negotiations with the Chinese, Russians, and the French to impose an international sanction of Fox News. Once the international community has given up on Fox they will crumble under a sustained rhetoric campaign spear headed by the great leader hinself. And if that does not work we can always drop a Mother Of All Bombs (MOAB) on their broadcasting stations.

We should merely pretend that Faux News is the great Unnews. It doesn't exist. We can watch Katie Couric cross her legs and sneer. We can listen to the bats fly around Dan Rather's head. We can of course listen to Janeane Gawdawfulo.

But since we cannot argue with Faux News, it has to be come the Unnews.

The mission was accomplished when Barry O., Lord Obama, first decided to become a community organizer.

For lo, he was created until Chicago, and lo he did minister unto the thugs, and lo he did teach them to threaten bankers and banker's wives and children, and lo did he then run for state senator, and lo then United States Senator.

And lo then he did attend only 147 days in the Senate, and lo did he then run for President, and lo then the Legacy Media roll over and prostrate themselves, shrieking, "Lord Obama! Lord Obama! Save us from our miserable selves!"

This was else where, this goes here too, as it seems these visions come to pass:

Alinsky Loves Anita

The Obama campaign's press strategy leading up to his election lastNovember focused on "making" the media cover what the campaign wantedand on exercising absolute "control" over coverage, White HouseCommunications Director Anita Dunn told an overseas crowd early thisyear.

I've only just recently returned from a very special mission for his "Holiness", and find that we are on the brink of war? I guess I have alot of catching up to do, so if you aren't hearing from me too often, it's because I'm busy reading. Also my People's Personal Communicator blew up during this most dangerous encounter (we Revolutionaries are always dodging bullets and such) although I have requested a replacement, I have yet to hear from the dolts-in-charge at Central Planning™!!

Guess I'll have to go over, personally, and kick in some heads? Where's Red Star and his goons when you have need of him?

Che! So good to see you back. The menus at the Hemlock Hospitality Inns are suffering from lack of attention. Red Star is quite vexed at your absence; you know that only your delectable People's Viands(tm) were what kept his SEIU goons highly trained troopers satisfied.

And where's the new menu for Lucrezia's? I have lots of proles who need a last meal.

The uncontested absurdities of today are the accepted slogans of tomorrow. They come to be accepted by degrees, by precedent, by implication, by erosion, by default, by dint of constant pressure on one side and constant retreat on the other - until the day when they are suddenly declared to be the country's official ideology. ~ Ayn Rand

Ex-president Obama declares Irma "Hurricane of Peace," urges not to jump to conclusions and succumb to stormophobia

CNN: Trump reverses Obama's executive order banning hurricanes

ISIS claims responsibility for a total solar eclipse over the lands of American crusaders and nonbelievers

When asked if they could point to North Korea on a map many college students didn't know what a map was

CNN: We must bring America into the 21st century by replacing the 18th century Constitution with 19th century poetry

Pelosi: 'We have to impeach the president in order to find out what we impeached him for'

BREAKING: As of Saturday July 8, 2017, all of Earth's ecosystems have shut down as per Prince Charles's super scientific pronouncement made 96 months ago. Everything is dead. All is lost. Life on Earth is no more.

DNC to pick new election slogan out of four finalists: 'Give us more government or everyone dies,' 'Vote for Democrats or everyone dies,' 'Impeach Trump or everyone dies,' 'Stop the fearmongering or everyone dies'

Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power" is humanity's last chance to save the Earth before it ends five years ago

Experts: The more we embrace diversity the more everything is the same

Study: Many non-voters still undecided on how they're not going to vote

The Evolution of Dissent: on November 8th the nation is to decide whether dissent will stop being racist and become sexist - or it will once again be patriotic as it was for 8 years under George W. Bush

Venezuela solves starvation problem by making it mandatory to buy food

China launches cube-shaped space object with a message to aliens: "The inhabitants of Earth will steal your intellectual property, copy it, manufacture it in sweatshops with slave labor, and sell it back to you at ridiculously low prices"

Progressive scientists: Truth is a variable deduced by subtracting 'what is' from 'what ought to be'

Experts agree: Hillary Clinton best candidate to lessen percentage of Americans in top 1%

America's attempts at peace talks with the White House continue to be met with lies, stalling tactics, and bad faith

Starbucks new policy to talk race with customers prompts new hashtag #DontHoldUpTheLine

Hillary: DELETE is the new RESET

Charlie Hebdo receives Islamophobe 2015 award; the cartoonists could not be reached for comment due to their inexplicable, illogical deaths

Russia sends 'reset' button back to Hillary: 'You need it now more than we do'

Barack Obama finds out from CNN that Hillary Clinton spent four years being his Secretary of State

President Obama honors Leonard Nimoy by taking selfie in front of Starship Enterprise