Your Girlfriend Tells You She "Wants Space"... What's Next?

"I'm backing off from the relationship, because I need some space..."

Space... the final frontier. It's also the last stop on your relationship, if you're not careful. Space might seem like a good idea at first, but in the end, it's a relationship killer. And if you want to win your girlfriend back? You'd better understand why.

Is your girlfriend an astronaut?

If not, she doesn't need space. What she needs is to slip away from you in the easiest way possible, and then blame the end of the relationship on the fact that you just "drifted apart."

A girlfriend who tells you that she needs space is contemplating something (or possibly someone) else. She's looking in other directions, and none of those directions have you anywhere on the distant horizon.

At the same time though, your girlfriend is also looking to keep you around. By asking for "space", she's putting you on a shelf. Ideally, she'd like you to sit there quietly while she explores other options and decides what to do next.

But before being placed in boyfriend limbo, there's something you should know:

Rule #10: NEVER Agree To Giving Each Other 'Space', Or To Putting Your Relationship On a 'Break'

Both of these terms are euphemisms for "I wanna see what else is out there for me." Your girlfriend is essentially jumping over the fence to see if the grass is greener on the other side, but she's asking you to stay put in case she feels like coming back.

A lot of guys fall for the "let's take some time apart" speech simply because they don't want to lose their girlfriend. They think:

"I'd better let her do what she wants, because if I don't,she's only going to resent me."

These guys are willing to place themselves in a holding pattern while their girlfriend flies off to do her thing. And when she doesn't come back? They're somehow astonished that she'd abandon the relationship without "giving it a chance" to work itself out.

The "space" thing is nothing more than an excuse. Putting distance between you doesn't allow each of you to focus on the relationship any more intensely, and it certainly doesn't fix the problems you might have as a couple.

Your girlfriend isn't saying "Hey, let's take some time off from the relationship so we can miss each other again!" Instead, she's saying "Hey, I want some time apart because there might be some other guy out there that I'd rather date."

See this guy right here? →

He just gave his relationship 'a break'. And now he's sitting here alone, wondering when the break will be over, contemplating whether or not his girlfriend still really loves him.

Know where his girlfriend is? Out with friends, holding a fluorescent green drink, contemplating which guy she wants to dance with next.

The break is always a sucker move. It never helps your situation, and can only hurt it.

What Should You Do When Your Girlfriend Wants a Break?

When the girl you're dating asks to put your relationship on a break, you've really got three options. Only one of them works, so pay close attention:

Option 1: Talking Your Girlfriend Out of The Break

In this scenario, your girl sits you down and asks for some time apart... and you spend the next several hours, maybe even days, trying to talk her out of it.

Maybe you beg. Maybe you plead. Maybe you throw yourself at her feet and hug her ankles, begging to stay together. Maybe you even offer to do something exciting or take her someone she's always wanted... or buy her something expensive to make up for neglecting her lately.

End Result: You're delaying the inevitable. If your girlfriend wants some space she's going to take it, whether it be now or later on down the road.

Option 2: Agreeing With The Break, Taking Some Time Apart

Here, you take the high road. You agree with your girlfriend that you could use some time apart. She walks in one direction, you walk in the other... but in the pit of your stomach, you've got the sinking feeling that maybe you just saw each other - romantically at least - for the very last time.

So what happens next? Do you see other people, or are you a good little boy who sits around waiting for her to come back? And hey, when is she coming back, anyway? She never said. And is she seeing some other guy during this time?

Suddenly, agreeing with your break doesn't seem like such a good idea anymore. Neither of you defined the rules, so there are no rules. Anything and everything goes, and there's now tons of room for miscommunication and misunderstanding.

If you call your 'ex' girlfriend, you seem needy. If you don't call her, maybe she'll think you don't care. You're stuck in a hellish limbo of not being able to do a single thing... all because you decided to roll with the stupid notion of "taking some time off" from each other.

End Result: You have absolutely no idea what's going on with your relationship... that is, if you even have one anymore.

Option 3: Refusing The Break: Telling Your Girlfriend To Take a Walk

By far, the best option you have is a pre-emptive strike. Instead of fighting her on wanting to walk away, or agreeing to some time off, the best thing you can do right now is simple: break things off completely.

"Listen, I'm not sure how things went with your past boyfriends, but I don't do this 'break' crap. We're not in junior high school."

Right about now her jaw will drop slightly open. Then you hit her with:

"Either you date me or you don't date me... you want me, or you don't want me. There's no middle ground. I don't want half a relationship, and I'm certainly not sitting aroundwaiting for you to decide what you want."

This type approach is utterly flawless. By breaking up with your girlfriend rather than accepting time apart, you're seizing control of the situation.

Maybe she'll angrily agree with the breakup and storm off... or maybe she'll even fight you on the decision to break up with her!

Either way you win. Your girlfriend now realizes you're not going lay down and play the chump while she's off playing the field. You stepped up, and you stomped all over her lame, half-assed plan to keep you floating around while she did her own thing.

End Result: Your girlfriend is completely bewildered by your reaction. The idea of losing you instantly and completely is not what she wants.

The Good News About Your Girlfriend Wanting A Break

A 'break' is not a breakup... at least not yet. This is good news for you, because it means your girlfriend wasn't looking to completely ditch the relationship.

Right now, your girlfriend is on the fence. She's not sure. She's probably feeling trapped in a so-so relationship, and wants to feel free to see what else is out there.

This is the best time for you to act.

There are guaranteed moves that will turn your ex girlfriend around, drawing her both emotionally and physically back to you.

Before she makes the final decision to end things between you, your girlfriend will subconsciously give your relationship one last chance. This is the optimum time for you to make just the right moves.

The funny thing is this: your girlfriend won't even realize what's happening. On some very unconscious levels, she still wants things to work out between you and her. She'd rather save the relationship than lose it. From a certain perspective your girlfriend still loves you, and has emotional connections that she's still unwilling to break. At least initially.

The suggestion of 'taking a break' is always a call for you to act. You need to be proactive about your relationship here, or you risk losing it. Sitting back passively and waiting for your ex to come back to you is never a smart choice. Always take control, and always seize the opportunity to fix what's broken.

What If Your Girlfriend Wants To See Other People?

If part of the "break" your girlfriend wants involves seeing other people, you're in for a much longer ride. As much as you might not want to hear it, the hard truth is this: Your girlfriend already has someone else in mind.

Want an even more difficult truth? She may even be seeing this guy already. She's offering you the opportunity to see other people in order to assuage her own guilt, and to continue her new relationship without sneaking around.

There are definite signs that your girlfriend is cheating on you. Learning what they are can help determine whether your girlfriend has been seeing someone else while still dating you, or whether this new guy just showed up recently.

Other Resources To Stop Your Breakup Before It Happens

Breakup Reversed - by Robert Parsons

Halting and reversing the breakup process: that's what this amazing audio guide is all about. With a near 95% success rate, Breakup Reversed is designed specifically for couples in danger of breaking up, or who have recently gone their separate ways.

Learn how to identify the reasons behind your girlfriend's decision to break up with you, and what you can do to change her thinking. By touching upon the emotional bonds she still has for you, your ex girlfriend will begin wanting and needing you again. Best of all you'll start seeing results immediately, after you've applied just a few very simple reconnection techniques.

Techniques include how to make your ex girlfriend jealous, without doing much of anything. Robert Parson's methods are designed to quickly get her to want you again, so that your ex comes back to you... instead of you crawling back to her. This makes for a quicker reconciliation, a better reunion, and a more lasting relationship once the two of you do get back together again.