Not the Fundamentals: Family Size

Accepting the Bible to be inspired by God necessitates the belief that God affirms the value of life, and therefore children. So before we even begin this emotionally-charged discussion, know that I stand firmly within that belief. (Especially as a pacifist). All the kids in my life are special. In no way do I think that there should be governmental restrictions on the amount or gender of children that a couple has. Basically, kids are a good thing.

Nevertheless, despite this affirmation, I strongly object to the Quiverfull movement and it’s often-attendant theology of Dominionism. (Please note that not all people who ascribe to the Quiverfull movement also ascribe to Dominionism, but the two can be generally linked). In essence, Quiverfull adherents believe that any and all forms of birth control are sinful, because a married couple should always be open to the blessing of more children. Dominionism is a complex system, but essentially makes no distinction between Israel and the Church; the Church is subject to the same blessings and curses found in the Sinai covenant and it’s subsequent reiteration in Deuteronomy. Dominionists believe that Christians must bring about the total reformation of society as a whole, distinct from the mainstream idea of Christ changing the individual. When the two systems are linked, the focus lies on “outbreeding” everyone else, especially secular humanists and even other Christian groups, which may or may not be seen as legitimate.

As you might imagine, the families treading this path live within a very legalistic structure, with emphasis on outward conformity. (Again, this is a generalization. Certainly not all Quiverfull families are legalistic. However, based on what I have read, there is a great deal of pressure toward certain “norms.”)

Dominionism is based on a poor hermeneutic, one that I simply cannot get behind. The Church has not replaced Israel; at the very least, Romans 9-11 makes that clear. The prophecies found in Revelation were not all fulfilled in the years immediately following Christ’s ascent. Certainly, some of them were, but many of the prophecies can and do have a dual meaning and therefore a dual fulfillment. Christians aren’t to set up Christ’s kingdom before He returns. Outward conformity does not indicate true faith.

I could go on, but we’ll leave it at that.

The Quiverfull movement is based on a poor understanding of Scripture and of medical science. Firstly, the movement bases itself on Psalm 127:3-5 –

“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.” (NKJV)

As far as I know, you won’t find a single Christian person who disagrees with the above. Children are a blessing. Children are from God. Yet how one jumps from this to “have as many babies as possible” is still somewhat mystifying to me. And yes, surely, God did command Adam and Eve to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28), but taking this as a literal command for all future generations fails to take context into account. Additionally, the argument that the Bible “doesn’t talk about birth control” means nothing. The Bible also doesn’t talk about smartphones.

Contrary to their beliefs, birth control does not cause abortions. Birth control prevents pregnancy from happening. Unless you believe that an egg and a sperm are, on their own, viable human life, this should be apparent. No fertilization and no implantation equals no baby. Furthermore, the alarm cry that using birth control directly leads to breast (or other) cancer is far too loud, as this clearly points out.

There is a willful blindness at play. I’m all for trusting God to provide, but I’m also all for the common sense that He gave each of us and that is enhanced and developed by the Spirit. For example, if you have three kids and know that you aren’t in a position to take care of a fourth, then don’t have that fourth. If there are medical issues that would prevent you from properly caring for children, don’t have them. In neither case does this point to a lack of salvation or faith. It means that you’re using the brain God gave you to recognize your situation and handle it appropriately.

Those who have been reading this blog for awhile know that I am unable to have children, but that isn’t why this issue is so important to me. I hate what kids suffer because of the actions of their parents. I don’t dislike it, it doesn’t annoy me. I hate it. Children don’t ask to be born. They don’t ask to suffer because of a lack of time, money or other resources. They don’t ask to be neglected. They don’t ask to take on adult-sized responsibilities long before they are able. They don’t ask to be the children of selfish people who should never have been parents.

This is what the Quiverfull and other fundamentalist movements fail to take into account. God does not call each of us to the exact same life. Singleness is blessed. Marriage without kids is blessed. Marriage with two kids is blessed. Marriage with one kid and the mission field is blessed. Marriage with adoption is blessed. Blended families are blessed. So long as one is walking with the Lord, there are as many variations as there are Christians.

Finally, I fail to see how the size and shape of my family is the business of anyone but myself, my husband and God. I know large families and I know small families. I know blended families. I know families who have adopted. I know widows, widowers and never-marrieds. To say that any of them are outside the will of God claims a sight that I know no human to have.

I don’t disagree with you. Where we part ways is in my belief that God can and does use methods such as birth control and Natural Family Planning to achieve His will. I didn’t state this in the post (and probably should) but I do believe that married couples should celebrate the conception of a baby, even if they weren’t planning on having one at that time.