You know how to get away with drinking beers during an NFL offseason and get away with it? Win a Super Bowl. The more we look into Eli Manning’s April itinerary, the clearer it becomes that this guy just might be a closeted hardo looking to make his grand entrance onto the hardo scene. While Peyton is worrying about building a contender in Denver, Eli is sipping beers in Mississippi & Miami. Not even hiding the booze.

Here’s what is known about the Eli Manning Spring Break Booze Cruise: he was drinkin’ bottles at The Library in Oxford to begin the month (see below), went to Miami with his family where he was slamming beers with a buddy (see below) and was back in Oxford yesterday for Easter church service.

Suck it, Gronk. (Is that a lime in Eli’s Pool Pop? Think so.)

It’s not a secret that Eli is the beer drinker in the family. It’s just that he’d taken it underground for a couple of years. Photos of the booze hound just didn’t exist. Then, in 8 days the guy goes on a Super Bowl champion bender.

And the New York media is leaving him alone. ESPN probably doesn’t even realize the guy is developing man cans. Skip Bayless can’t find an antagonist angle to argue. The guy just walks around getting away with wearing this and ordering drinks at a bar/restaurant.