I've been plaguing myself for years with questions about marriage, wondering whether it was the right thing for me. But suddenly I snapped, and realized that all I was doing was making it harder than it needed to be. Looking for excuses, justifying what was nothing but a typical case of cold feet.

I proposed marriage to Amy Katherine Kubes on Wednesday, August 4, 1999 and she said yes yes yes. All of my doubts and fears lifted in a single cloud of dust, and all is right with the world. This is the way it should be. Two people in clarity, in love.

Amy is wearing an antique deco diamond ring that shines like forever.

Today we left the house for 30 minutes to do some grocery shopping. When we returned we found the window of my office smashed on the brick floor of the courtyard and the front door wide open. Thieves took a laptop, a VCR, and a bicycle, leaving behind tons of easy pickings for reasons we'll probably never know. The police took three hours to arrive, but did some really thorough fingerprinting. I've already scoured the flea market, and today I'm touring the local pawn shops.

So what now? Living behind window bars? Moving to the country? We don't want to capitulate, but this is getting ridiculous. No one should have to live in fear.

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