Thursday, March 08, 2007

THE HUMAN IS THE COOLEST MAMMAL EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEY ARENT DINOSAURS BUT MANY LIVE IN PANGEA!!!!!!11!!!! HUMANS STARTING GOING TO PANGEA WHEN JOHN LOCKE BUILT A TIME MACHINE AND DISCOVERED THAT ALL PEOPLE WENT TO THE END OF TIME WHEN THEY DIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111!!!!!!!!! IT WAS VERY CRAMPED THERE AND JOHN LOCKE DIDNT LIKE THAT SO HE REDIRECTED THE PEOPLE EITHER TO PANGEA TO LIVE WITH THE DINOSAURS AND ANCIENT MARS FOR PEOPLE TO LIVE WITH THE MARSASAURS!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!!! HE THEN SET HIMSELF TO LIVE IN BOTH HUMAN EARTH AND PANGEA AT THE SAME TIME AND SAID THAT ANYONE WHO FOUND HIM AND KNEW THAT HE LIVED IN BOTH TIMES SIMULTANEOUSLY THEY COULD TOO!!!!!!11111!!!!!! SO FAR ONLY ME AND ABRAHAM LINCOLN HAVE DONE THAT!!!!!!!!!!11111!!!!!!!! OTHER PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN PANGEA ARE US PRESIDENTS AWESOME PEOPLE WHO DESERVE TO LIVE WITH AWESOME CREATURES AS AWESOME AS DINOSAURS AND EVIL PEOPLE WHO NEED TO USE DINOSAURS TO MEND THEIR EVIL WAYS!!!!!!!!!!11111!!!! THE REST GO TO ANCIENT MARS TO LIVE WITHT HE MARSASAURS WHO ARE COOL BUT NOT AWESOME!!!!!!!!11111!!!!!!111!! I LOVE THE HUMAN AND IT LOVES ME. THIS KID ALSO LOVES THE HUMAN.

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Mere moments ago, I was idly wondering what fascinating facet of dinosaur culture might be revealed on the latest Dinosaur Joe update. Never had I dared to dream that such awesome questions about existence would be answered on this blog. I will never underestimate Dinosaur Joe again.

The floor has now been opened to a discussion of the afterlife. People going to the end of time sounds horrifying. By "the end of time," are we talking about a Big Crunch scenario? If you don't have the answer, perhaps Mr. Locke would be willing to expound?

I'm troubled by something in this assertion. If people go to either Mars or Pangea when they die, do they then die again? Obviously, the era of Pangea has passed and there are currently no people (or Marsasaurs as far as I can tell!) living on Mars. Is this truly an afterlife?

When a dead person goes to the end of time, Pangea, or Mars, do they transfer over in their current form? If I die today, would I be 24? If my grandfather died, would he be 84? What about my baby cousin? This has always troubled me about the concept of an afterlife.

Is your existence in Pangea a linear, parallel timeline, moving in synchronicity with the modern, present era, or can one who goes back in time to Pangea end up in any number of places among the millions of years of the dinosaur's reign? How does this work for the living?

THE END OF TIME ALREADY HAPPENED WHERE PEOPLE WENT WAS ONE ROOM THAT SURVIVED!!!!!11111!!!! I CHOSE A TIME TO LIVE IN PANGEA AND ILL LIVE THERE FOREVER!!!!!!!!11!! I ALSO LIVE ON EARTH FOREVER AT THE SAME TIME ITS NOT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND!!!!!!111!!!! AND YOU CHOOSE YOUR AGE!!!!!1!!!! THE MARSASAURS ARE ANCIENT MARS LIFEFORMS WHO COPIED TEH DINOSAURS!!!!!!!!111!!!!

I regret to inform you of the passing of your esteemed great-uncle, Trilobyte Hank. As you may well know, Trilobyte Hank suffered from a myriad of problems, including dinophagia. His final will and testament will be read in his home "the Primordial Goo Pit".

So, Dinosaur Joe, I have myriad questions for you, yet. Despite the time that has passed since you initially posted this and your first round of (partial) answers to my already numerous questions, my mind is still reeling from this amazing revelation. Where I thought I would only find a website dealing with the tough questions about dinosaurs, I found a discourse on the insurmountable questions of the nature life, death, the soul, and eternity.

But first off, I must ask: have you achieved any sort of immortality? Will you die in either of your timelines? If everyone goes back to millions of years ago after we die (I'm assuming at least a sizable portion of humanity opts for Pangaea over Mars), why do we not see these people still around? There must be billions of them! Does time fold in on itself? A circle? A cycle? Or are Pangaea, Mars, (or the room) merely the next stage in a continuous progression of afterlives? Is this life that I live an afterlife?

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