FDR to extend hand in friendship to world’s Nazis in speech from Hitler’s bunker this June 4th, 1943

The following weekend, he’ll be in Japan attempting to repair relations with the island nation through a talk delivered from Emperor Hirohito’s palace.

This comes on the heels of the President’s comments made outside Auschwitz that Nazism deserves “respect.” Mr. Roosevelt also suggested that the nations of Europe and Asia should advance the Peace Process by making sacrifices, including “Land for Peace.”

“We must dialogue with the moderate elements of the Waffen-SS, kamikaze, and banzai units,” he declared.

The White House has announced details of Mr. Roosevelt’s charm offensive. He plans to bow deeply to both Hitler and Hirohito as a sign of mutual respect, apologize for Pearl Harbor, Midway, and the Holocaust, and reassure both empires of his continued commitment to bankrupting and disarming America in the name of “Main Street.”

As a sign of the United States’ good will, the President will release members of the German and Japanese militaries captured in combat into American society at taxpayers’ expense.

Additionally, American successes in Doolittle’s Raid, the Battle of the Coral Sea, and Midway have now been redesignated “Embarrassing Failures of Diplomacy;” the methods used to decipher Japanese communications leading to the American “victory” at Midway have been published in the New York Times, and the Cryptanalytic Unit responsible for the intelligence that gave America the advantage there has been accused of lying by one of Mr Roosevelt’s closest allies in Congress.

Plans for actions at Hiroshima, Nagasaki, Dresden, and Normandy have all been postponed and await Nazi and Japanese approval.

President Roosevelt also unveiled Executive Order #12071941 establishing “Overseas Contingency Operations Relocation Camps.” Americans opposing the President’s policies will be designated “extremists” and evaluated for the confiscation of their First through Tenth Amendment Rights.

The Order also gives the president the authority to monitor and suspend all radio, telegraph, and pen-and-paper communications.