Sending you love and support, and hoping you can find the time and space you need to figure out how to keep yourself safe.

Don

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Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

There's a time and place for things and right now may be the time to just keep the peace. As you are talking with him see if you can focus on the path the doesn't hurt you anymore than they already do and can stabilize the situation so you can make decisions removed from the heat of the moment.

Good luck.

((((Husky))))

Edited by Rich1967 (06/19/1410:11 AM)

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"Me too"-I don't think I will ever get tired of saying or hearing these two words. My StoryProgress

((( husky)))) I am so sorry you are in such a difficult place man i really have no sage advice to give you. I TOTALLY wish i did. I do think though that being summoned to "have a Drink" is perpetuating an illusion of theirs. it seems that as a grown man you have the option to go or not, to do or not. I know its not that easy I havent gone to see my father in months largely because it is just so damn difficult, when I get around him I become that scared little boy again. in any event man try to not let the guilt push you too hard. what is happening happens on two sides they have a part in it as well. she needs to learn to leave you alone when you say leave me alone. I so hope it gets better soon man Jeff

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Either I will find a way, or I will make one.Philip Sidney

Hey Husky. I don't want to come across like I have the right answer in your situation with your parents. I was triggered immensely and was instantly back in my bedroom with my foster mother screaming at me in the doorway. I had failed to get up to start her car for her and I woke up to her screaming at me. When I stood up she fired her keys at me hitting me in the head. I picked them up and was going to throw them back at her. The anger inside me was frightening. I really felt at the time I could have killed her. It was not over the incident at the time but built up after years of violence and abuse she perpetrated on me and my sister. I walked up to her and grabbed her wrists and backed her out and across the hall and into the closet and shut the door. I am so grateful I did not go any further, but the anger that had built up in me after years of her hate and cruelty was right there at the surface. I can feel it now talking about it. May I suggest to you Husky as a fellow survivor that you get yourself some support now. This is too big for you my friend. You need outside professional support to intervene in the situation on your behalf. Please forgive me If I have gone to far but I have been there and it registered so clearly with me. I stayed away from my foster mother as much as I could after that incident. It was the first time I defended myself and stood up for myself and quite frankly it scared the shit out of me. Take Care of yourself Husky. It is time for you to put your safety first. Sentry.

i don't want to come across as nagging - because i know that you have heard this before - but - this just really underscores the importance of you getting the hell out of there as soon as you possibly can. whatever you can do to make that happen, it should be your number one priority, IMHO!

be careful and take care of yourself,LEE

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"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"

It's been a few hours since the "blow up" and I hope things have settled down a bit and you feel more in control of how you're coping. I know in my own situation getting away from parents was like a whole new life of freedom. Obviously, I don't know your personal situation, but sometimes family relationships are just too toxic to try to deal with. Parents can cause such pain and heart ache. I wish I had some great advice to offer, but I don't, I can only say my thoughts are with you in this difficult, difficult situation.

Husky - two weeks - that is good to hear. you can do that. you will do so much better once you are in a less sick and toxic atmosphere. hold on and be cool - a better time and place is within reach.lee

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"My experience has shown me that I all too often tend to deny that which lies behind, but as I still believe, that which is denied cannot be healed." Brennan Manning, "All is Grace - A Ragamuffin Memoir"

You've got a worldwide group standing with you here through the hard times, Husky.

Keep reminding yourself that this is not a permanent situation.

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I have taken to the stand-up comedy stage to educate other male survivors and those who try to love them. I blog about my isolated religious upbringing where physical and sexual abuse were commonplace and I serve as a facilitator of a weekly support group for men who have suffered sexual assault.

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