Meta

Month: October 2013

Where do I even begin? I guess I will just stick with the facts. On August 20th I went out with my “boyfriend” the one I have written about before to have dinner and drinks. It was a fine evening, pretty uneventful until we started to drive home. To be honest, I don’t remember how the argument started or even what it was about. What I do remember is pulling into my driveway (he was driving my car) He got out, stormed off to his truck which was parked in the grass swell opposite the driveway. I got out of the passenger side of my car and approached his truck, walking up to the driver’s side window and he decided to peel off in an aggravated and intoxicated state. I remember the truck striking me. I remember being in heels and grabbing onto the truck to stop from falling. I remember being dragged approx 10 feet and then hearing my skull fracture on the concrete. I will be honest, that’s about all I remember of the accident itself. I woke up in bed at around 2 am covered from head to toe in pools of blood, stuck to my bed sheets and in the worst pain of my life. It was the day my mother had a surgical procedure so I remember not wanting to say anything at all about how bad I was because she was going through her own medical issues. But it was BAD. I was dizzy, nauseous, headache, vomiting and if you’ve heard the term “hit like truck” that’s exactly how I felt. Literally. I had about a dozen voicemails from the “boyfriend” sobbing into the phone, apologizing. I had text messages apologizing and that was pretty much the extent of how far his concern went. I took me over a week to get his insurance information. He withheld it from me stating that his attorney advised him not to speak with me. I should have called 911 that night, I should have been hospitalized but it was not a good time for such things. I had a job interview, my mother had just had surgery, there was simply no time for this to be happening to me (survival mode + concussion + humiliation= poor choices). I will honestly tell you that I thought that almost killing me would be his wake up call…..it was not. I gave him the option of going to counseling or going to jail and he called it “blackmail”. I protected him that night, insisting to my mother and him to NOT call 911 because I knew that he would go to jail. I knew he wouldn’t pass a breathalyzer, I knew it would be the end of his career…even in my severely injured state, I protected him and he has since left me permanently scarred, with a fractured skull/brain injury (dizziness, headaches), a ruptured left implant and more emotional damage then I care to report. I had a job interview 2 days after the accident. I pulled myself together, wore a dress long enough to cover all my injuries, landed the job and have been in counseling ever since. He has given me 50.00 so far for expenses. He has turned his back on me completely. And I am once again left picking up the pieces and trying to smile everyday, count my blessings (I’m still alive) and heal the only way I know how….and admitting I was in a pretty abusive relationship is a start….I don’t know how I got to be this way…but I’m still growing, learning, healing and living RESILIENT.

The following are the pictures I sustained from the accident…don’t look if you don’t want to know (GRAPHIC) I OMITTED THE RUPTURED IMPLANT PHOTO