Find a Fight You Can Believe In Again

Warriorhood — the status of being a warrior. Warrior — a person who is called to defend others; to live by a code of honor and ethics in pursuit of the greater good; to lead the non- warrior class in living up to the ideals of the society. These definitions are my own, but I think they are solid. Regardless of definition being a warrior is a calling. Oh, it is an oft used term and its overuse is offensive. I do not see professional athletes as warriors. Sorry. No one is getting shot on the 50 yard line today. There is no catastrophic fail of human rights if an otherwise reasonable and classy athlete engages in an unsavory press interview speech. Other cultures have and have had a warrior class. The United States does not. It could violate the equality under the law clause. At a minimum, it does violate the founding tenet of equality.

But, in many ways, it is a separate group in our culture. Some of us never dreamed we would do it for as long as we did. Some of us only joined up to do our bit for the war on terror. For others it was the thing we were born to do. If you are reading this then you are probably no longer in the official status of warrior. By that I mean that your professional tenure as soldier, marine, sailor, airman, coast guardsman, is over. You are now a veteran. The treasured post-warrior class of the nation. I know it does not seem like this always; especially for the VietNam guys. Some of us got parades. Some of us got spit on. Some of us are still trying to sort out what it was all for.

Most of us have PTSD, PTE, or some form of Post Combat Transformation (PCT-my own term). We watch football millionaires not render honors to the nation and others argue about which toilet in the restaurant they should use. It is easy to see the country and compare the pop-culture against the value of buddies’ lives spent so that we could have these ridiculous arguments. Here is a hint: the arguments were not worth their lives — but hold that thought. If that statement rings true to you then your professional tenure as warrior is up, but your spiritual tenure as one is not. For most of us that can never be. It is both our great blessing and our great curse.

Some of us are glad to be out and some of us cry about losing that part of our lives. Some of us got medically retired. Some retired the conventional way. Some just got disillusioned and left. Big deal; why am I saying this when we all know it? Because we are all still warriors. The days of just joining up to get the college money is 17 years past. That is when this era of constant war started.

We had our eyes wide open when we stepped into the recruiter’s cubicle. There was no question where that conversation would lead us. So how do we maintain warriorhood now that we are veterans? That is “veteran” and not “former warrior”. I am not certain that such a thing exists. I am of the opinion that once a warrior, always a warrior. The question is now how do I get my warrior on without a uniform to wear?

To answer this let’s breakdown what it is to be a warrior. We all believe in something bigger than ourselves. That’s easy. For all of us that was the ideal of America. I understand that there are warts and stretch marks on Lady Liberty and she might need a boob job, but that lamp is still on. We followed the lamp. We sweated bullets and bled for that lamp to stay lit. This dovetails nicely into the second reason which is a desire to serve. The third is a willingness to defend her and the people she has brought in. Regardless of what you believe about immigration or racial differences you believed that the torch on the statue was for everyone here. Newsflash – it is; you were right.

The defense of the nation and her people points to the major corollary of warriorhood (a corollary is a major point that supports a principle). That corollary is that we were all willing to do a job no one else would. The active service is around 1% of the population. You are elite. You are the 1% who dared. Those that did not will have many “reasons” like they did not support the war, did not want to be shot at, believed they were best used elsewhere, etc. These are the excuses of selfishness and in some cases cowardice. We were not selfish.

Stay with me we are almost there. The first is that we believe in doing things. We are not talkers and philosophers. We do not trust speeches. I tell my friends that I am what happens when those speeches fail. Talk is nice but we tend to see it as a warning order. In other words we either drop the polite discussion or do something with it. Final point-we are leaders. The lowest marine or army private is more capable of handling most emergencies than John Q. Public. It isn’t their fault. It comes from knowing that you can do things because you have. They try to live their life stress free. You see that as a kind of prison.

So if we set this up in proper military fashion it looks like this:

Belief in the American ideal-we followed her lamp/torch.

We wanted to serve others.

We wanted to defend our country and her citizens-even those of the other political party.

We were willing to do a job others were not. We are the 1%.

We are not selfish.

We are people of decisive action.

We are leaders.

Now you are out of uniform. You have some kind of PCT. Your noble intentions had consequences that you were only vaguely aware of much like a professional athlete who now has concussion syndrome. The explosions were cool when you were in training but now you blanch at 4th of July fireworks. Getting shot at did not scare you when you fought, it pissed you off and made some noise of your own. You were fast, lethal, and very expert. Now you are broke, angry, scared, physically broken, and Lord knows what else.

For my own part I spent a few years just kind of cowering from life. I had had enough and whereas I was not planning a suicide if I had fallen in front of a careening Mack truck I would not have tried to get up. Many of you are like that. It wears on your family and friends. It wears on you. One friend told me “I am so angry all the time that it makes me tired.”

How do you get out of this weird alien syndrome you find yourself in? Here is the answer as I see it – it lies in our training and the six reasons I listed above. It seems to me that cowering and hoping that things get better is not who we are. It is antithetical to our character, to our training, and it doesn’t work that well either. I was in special operations, we have great unit mottoes (as you did) like “Molon Labe or De Oppresso Liber, or my personal favorite from the SAS: “Who dares wins”.

These mottoes indicate action or the readiness of a cocked fist. This is who we are. If nothing else the country sure could use the leadership we can provide. It can use some unselfish people who still think Lady Liberty is hot. Time to mount up boys and girls, the work ain’t done yet. Seek out the positive action you can take for the cause you believe in. If it is not the country that’s fine. I am not going to judge that, but we need something or someone to fight for. Find it.

You may need some counseling and some meds. If that’s you then do that and take them. Don’t make excuses and don’t be ashamed. That is what you need to be mission capable. Don’t listen to the people who tell you it’s a sign of strength to get help. Also, don’t listen to that voice that tells you it’s a sign of weakness. Here is ground truth, it is neither. It is simply what you need to do to stay in whatever fight you are in. It is like spare batteries for your night vision – you just make sure you have them. So do it and tell everyone else thanks for their irrelevant opinion.

America is at a crossroads and needs it veterans vibrant and active. Can we still shoulder a ruck and move out? No. Those days are behind us but look at what we are doing in business and politics. Look at the numbers of us who are getting into teaching. There are still fights worth engaging in. That does not have to be a senate run or mayoral bid. It might just mean being a deacon at the church, volunteer to run the neighborhood watch, or show the guys at the plant what a good day’s work really is. Maybe coach a youth team.

Our perspective is unique-after all only 1% of the population has ever done it at any given time; perhaps 7% of the total population has ever served. We have a perspective on life that they just don’t get but they need. They are the folks we defended but were not permitted to be a part of. Well, we are part of them now and a new 1% is stepping up to serve.

Being in therapy does not mean that we are out of the fight. In fact it might just help us get back into it. Remember the 6 pillars (above) of what a warrior is. Don’t let someone else tell you what you are or when you are “healed”. That happens when you say-and being in counseling or on meds does not mean that you are not healed. It is just how you manage your day now. Combat changes us. One of those ways is to ingrain the warrior into us. If that is who you are then don’t stop now because life will not make sense any other way. Warrior you were. Warrior you are. Warrior you will be. Find a fight you can believe in again. Suit up.

Joe DeCree is a Maj. (Ret.) US Army, Green Beret, 19th SFG (A). He works with returning veterans and lives with his family in Montana. You can contact Joe directly at jdegijoe@gmail.com or 406-871-0638 MT.

Thank u for the perspective ..my parnter is a retired Canadian Navy vet and is in the depths of this …being a warrior in combat..and now being a warrior against ptsd .. Its so hard to watch and support ..💔

Post navigation

Suicidal?

If you are suicidal, I will do my best to help you, but I am NOT a crisis counselor. If you are in immediate danger of killing yourself, please call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

Suicide is NOT the right decision. Don’t do it. Reach out. There is hope for you.

Your Life After War

You've come home. You may have PTSD, you may not. Everyone expects you to get on with your life. Pick up the pieces. Forget about it.

It's not that easy, is it?

If you're like most vets, life after war isn't what you'd thought it'd be. You've got a lot of questions, anger, sadness, disappointment, or you may not know what you're feeling. You might even feel just fine.

And yet...the war won't just go away.

How do you move forward?

How can friends and loved ones better understand you?

Where do you even begin?

Let's find out together....

You’re Here for a Reason

If you’ve found this site, there’s a reason. You’re searching, you’re wondering, maybe you just need someone to tell you what you’re going through is normal – and that there’s hope for you.

Maybe you just need someone to listen without worrying that they’ll judge you. All of the work I do with vets is strictly on a volunteer basis – and I am not associated with any government or mental health organizations.

So reach out. It’s time you stopped walking this path alone. Contact me at brittareque@gmail.com, message me here on this site or via Facebook Messenger (scroll down for a link).

Connect on Facebook

Follow Blog via Email

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 1,774 other subscribers

Email Address

Translate

Archives

Archives

Disclaimer & Privacy

All content on this site, advice, and personal recommendations are not intended to replace medical or mental health treatment or counsel. I am not a licensed therapist. Please consult medical professionals for diagnosis and treatment.

Privacy
This site uses cookies. I respect your privacy and do not share confidential information. Comments are held for personal review by me and will not be published if I feel they should remain private. Note that any public comment you make may be made public on this site. To contact me confidentially, email me at brittareque@gmail.com.