“He didn’t mean to kill Patty. He was shooting because he was afraid.” These astonishing words of forgiveness tumbled out of my friend’s mouth as we sat on the carpeted hallway floor outside of the chapel. She had just sat through a meeting on the logistics of heightened security and traffic flow needed for the funeral of her precious husband, killed in the line of duty.

Her voice was soft and calm. Undeniably sad and dazed, but certain. She spoke of the shooter’s family and the pain they must be enduring. In her time of deepest sorrow, my sweet friend kept her heart open.

She spent the subsequent days, weeks, months, even years, in unspeakable grief, a range of emotions I will never fully know; yet, she kept squeezing her babies tight…and each person she encountered. Yes, we know to expect that bear hug when she greets us.

My heart rejoices that her new husband now receives those bear hugs, and her his in return.

She kept her heart open.

***

There is a certain kind of destructive marriage…the kind that cries out for annulment, and my friend found herself in one. My friend with a bigger heart than just about anyone I know. A spirit so alive and adventurous. Children so precious. She—they—were being crushed. Resource after resource for improvement exhausted, laden with trauma most would not believe existed, she made a brave choice. She kept her heart open.

Knowing neither would heal together, and perhaps him ever, she fought for her kids and began a new, healthy life. She secured avenues of support, a home she made beautiful and safe for her babies, and an income to support them.

And then she completed certification as a yoga instructor.

She kept her heart open.

***

My brave friends are an example to me. They endured pain that few can understand, and they’ve continued on in ways that bring life to others. Rather than being bitter, they are better, and their light helps those around them to be better too. They kept their hearts open.

I’m focusing on keeping my heart open too. I’m writing from a place of personal upheaval as my family goes through many changes. I’m walking with my children as they learn to manage the stress and pain that comes with relationship changes that are beyond their control. Addresses are different. Income is different. We wonder why God allows what he allows.

And yet. Their spirits are sweet. Their precious personalities are blossoming as they journey with courage through some hard days.

We’re keeping our hearts open.

It’s hard to remember God is loving when the world feels like it’s collapsing.

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About Mandy Mianecki

Mandy Mianecki is a wife and mom of 4. The storms of life have taught her to put her nets out into the deep, seeking the superabundance that life in Christ promises. She is passionate about encouraging others in their healing journeys from brokenness to wholeness; in uncovering their unique kind of God-breathed brilliance; and in living in the freedom won by Christ. When she’s not writing, Mandy is still dreaming God-sized dreams, which usually involve making art, wearing turquoise, and eyeing a nearby jar of Nutella. She blogs at Hearts Undaunted or you can connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.

I love the words “keep your heart open” on repeat throughout this post. So simple yet it takes daily surrendering to accomplish this. Your stories display the beauty of an open heart and your own personal experience is teaching you to walk in faith with God who will hold you up just when you need him to. Thank you for the blessing of your words.

You come to mind so often. I’m proud of you for taking care of your family even on the hard days and continuing to seek God. Thanks for sharing this here. Hoping the peace that passes all our understanding continues as your navigate this season. xo

Mandy, you are so right that keeping an open heart is a choice. We know keeping an open heart can frequently include vulnerability. No matter where that path leads, our Savior promises to never leave us. Your affirmation and encouragement are welcome an powerful! Blessings!