"Nothing Exceeds Like Superfluous Jejunity "

Just Another Menace

Am I the only nutcase
who bobs his head
and mouths the words
to my favorite songs
when I’m listening
to my Ipod in the gym….

Recently, I’ve taken to
taping over my ear buds
to hold them better in
my ears —

my hearing isn’t all
that great these days
(probably due to listening
to loud music for
so many years) —

and it does seem to cut
back on the interruptions
by the more clueless of
my fellow gym-members.

But this had a secondary
and unexpected result –

–between songs —
(the only time I can hear
the outside world when I’m
taped up like that )
I heard a young woman
behind me describe me
as a “potential menace”.

I dunno if it was because
of my somewhat anti-social
demeanor when I’m in
there working out, or
that the whole tape thing
meant I might turn around
and suddenly step on
somebody who wasn’t
watching where they
were going because I
couldn’t hear em
chattering away
behind me..

Oh jeez,
I’m so torn.

On the one hand,
I don’t really want
people really thinking
that I’m a menace…

.. despite the fact thatthat word, and worse,
has been thrown
rather repeatedly
in my direction
over the years —

– usually because I ride a
big, loud, motorcycle,
but also because,
well, I guess I was
sorta a menace
as a youngster,
and I’m still
pretty annoying
as a full-grown adult
and 275 pound weightlifter.

On the other hand,
if menace is what I am,
I should embrace it
as the menace I must be.