Wednesday, January 31, 2007

How Extreme is John Edwards?This is a direct quote from the Edwards blog:

"Our analysis leads to some conclusions that many will perhaps find stunning:

*Even a steeply progressive income tax---right up to 99% on the highest incomes---would impose no loss of purchasing power on wealthy income earners.*Reducing the income tax rates of rich citizens will weaken the economy if Congress cuts spending to pay for the tax cuts.*Increasing the amount of taxes collected from wealthy citizens will actually provide a stimulus to the economy.*The rich cannot get richer---in real terms---by getting their taxes cut, but they can become richer if they pay more in taxes.*The government is a major producer of Real Wealth.*An increase in the size of government is almost always quite desirable."*Wealthy citizens who are wise should be lobbying for an increase in government spending and an increase in their tax rates."

Lenin would be proud.

And please... before you accuse me of taking this out of context or misrepresenting what was said... go read the garbage for yourself.

Its been said that I don't post enough pictures of the boys these days... I thought I'd throw one up of Eli. I suspect the last time y'all saw him he just a wee lad... not the monster you see before you here. Eli's not two yet and those PJ's are 3T. He's over the 90th percentile in both hieght and weight... hell... at least once strangers have mistaken him for a three-year-old.

Its rare enough to find him actually sitting still... but when I found him in his standard pose... foot propped up and all... I had to get a pic. Also... note the white powder on his face. He'd literally just stuffed a whole powdered donut in his mouth. The kid eats everything in a single bite. Its like living with a wee Homer Simpson.

Barbaro DownThis is just infuriating. It didn't have to happen this way. JAC has written a lot on this over at ThreeWay and I'm sure we'll hear more soon... but for now... I just want to curse the name of those responsible for this whole disaster.

There is something else going on here... there were treatment options available that were not explored... or at least it appears that way... and it wreaks of pride. Someone saw things his way and his way was the only way... and I'll wager a damned fine horse died because of it.

And of course... as always... there is the business aspect... you end up with business men making decisions that should be made by horse men... so because a spreadsheet that some puckfaced accounted came up with said that the insurance money was more than the breeding potential... well... shit... you know the rest.

Breed 'em to look like birds... race 'em to young... then kill 'em and cash the insurance check when they break the tiny bones you bred them to have in the first place.

Keep Your Sick Kid HomeListen... I understand that its inconvenient. I understand that its a pain in the butt. But I don't care. You shouldn't be getting me and my kids sick for your own convenience.

Perhaps I should explain...

We had to take our boys to the denist this morning. Standard checkups. As is our way, we got the earliest possible appointment, hoping to among the first in and out... thus avoiding as much of this type of issue as possible. Sadly... when we arrived we found the office lobby full of kids... which of course is fine... we love kids...

Well... it was fine... until we realized that one of the kids had pink eye.

PINK EYE!

One of the most contageous infections* you're likely to run into!

And there he is... running around... playing with all the toys with his infected little fingers...

So... we snatched up our boys... told the receptionist that there was a weapon biological warfare loose in her lobby, and headed for the truck. A couple minutes later the bloated sow that responsible was seen taking her children out to her truck. Obviously they'd kicked her out... and of course she made sure she shot some nasty looks our way.

Of course... we're bad people... We don't want our kids infected. We should be more open and accepting of the outrageously contageous. Of course... considering that the county school system is totally shutdown because of the flu, maybe parents should you know... Keep sick kids at home.

*Pink Eye is a bacterial infection of the eyes. It makes the eyes itch.. so of course... the kid rubs his eyes... spreading the infection to his hands... then he touches something... anything.. a toy... then your kid plays with the toy... which infects his hand... then he rubs his eye... and POOF! You're off to the doctor.

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Typical...So my problem with this is NOT that the Lizard Queen can't sing. I mean come on... who knows how that forked tongue affects pitch control... no no... my problem is.. Its running for President... and It doesn't even know the damned words to the National Anthem.

Friday, January 26, 2007

ATF

Drink! For the Love of God Drink! What reason could you possibly have to be sober? The Right Wing President proposed Universal Health Care to a Congress lead by Nancy Pelosi for crying out loud! I'm amazed anyone is sober at all...

The liberals are drunken euphorics... the conservatives are in a drunken stupor... the libertarians of course are too busy shooting up to worry about booze... and the folks in the Constitution Party are just so very happy that everyone but them is going to burn in Hell.

But enough of motivation! After all... what more does a man need than a fine bottle of Bookers staring back at him... calling to him... Just a sip lad!

So be it!

Actually I've started slowly tonight... I'm just drinkin' a plain ol' American style lager. No I'm not saying more... you beer snobs make me sick. You blather on like teenagers talking about music... the only beer that's good is the beer no one else has ever heard of. Because see... if you know of a great beer... and I never heard of it... then clearly you are a more knowledgable beer drinker than I am!

Woo Hoo... I couldn't care less. Fact is I've had so many fancy micro brews I get ill just thinking about them now. The fact is they suck. Most all of them... and one should also remember that the vast majority of microbrews aren't. Its just packaging. Just like the bourbon, tobacco, and wine industries.

I'd rather listen to 14 year old boys discuss their own musical insights than listen to two thirty something beer snobs prattle on about hopps and barley they've never grown nor seen.

Sorry... Budweiser tastes better than Sam Adams. Sam Adams tastes like shit. So does Heineken. And Canadian beer is almost as bad as Canadian whiskey...

I'm sick of hearing how the only good beer is the beer we can't get in America. Bullshit. Grow up.

Now.... back to matters at hand...

Anyone else smoke a corncob pipe?

oh.. and firearms.. hrm... I purchased a new shoulder rig. Tension-Retention deal... I like it. If you've never tried one of these things I recommend it. I'm not going into specifics about the brand or whatever... just as a general rule... the shoulder rigs tend to make life easier for some folks.

Anyway... I hope y'all are havin' a good time... I'm off to watch my Preds kick some Chicago Blackhawk ass in HD! WOO HOO!

Thursday, January 25, 2007

It was complete crap. It was a poor imitations of an old Opryland production.

There was one elephant in the whole first half of the show... and all it did was sit on a stool while some clowns had a food fight.

There was no trapeze.There was no tight rope walkerThere was no sword swallowerThere was no fire eaterThere were no tigersThere were no lionsThere were no bearsThere was no man shot from a canonThere was no death defying anytingThere was a bunch of singing and dancing.There was a lady who trained domestic birds and cats. WOO!

There were some piss poor acrobats.. the kind that you see at halftime of midmajor college basketball games.

There were some horses that trotted around in a figure-8. WOO!

Lame Lame Lame Lame

My only explaination is that the Circus has gone PC and nothing dangerous or offensive to PETA can go on.

Well.. it may have go on.. but it didn't go on in the first 90 minutes... and my 4-year-old wasn't keen on sticking around for the rest. Frankly I wasn't either.

Its like they tried to turn it into a broadway play... they tried to tell a story.... the idea being that a family from the audiance is picked out and "transformed" into circus performers... The dad becomes the Ring Master... and runs his mouth excessively the entire show... the mom suposedly became a trapeze artist... but we aren't really sure because she never really shows up in the first half of the show at all... The teenaged daughter becomes a brat of a dancer... and the little boy... around 10 I reckon.. can't decide what he wants to be... so the whole show is him trying to decide what he wants to be in the circus.

Its every bit as lame as it sounds.

There was not one single HOLY CRAP moment in the whole first 90 minutes.

I remember the B&B circus being pure sensory overload... amazing things... impossible things... going on all over the place at the same time. I remember butteryflies in my gut while some guy did something that I hoped wouldn't kill him.

I do NOT remember singing and dancing.

I do not remember piss poor acting. I don't remember any acting at all for that matter.

What the hell has happened to the world? Isn't anything worth a damn anymore?

I suppose first though I have to state the claim that I'm going to abuse in more scientific terms than "The Dinosaurs Did It".... so here goes... If you know anything about thermodynamics, chemistry, or physics look away... the next sentence is going to make you ill...

The Fossil Fuel theory states that highly oxidized biogenic molecules of low free enthalpy will spontenously evolve into highly reduced hydrocarbon molecules of high free enthalpy.

No serious scientist should get past that sentence. They should read it and laugh. One may as well postulate a theory of how Santa delivers toys. Its ludicrous. Thermodynamic testing has proven that this is inegregious violation of the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics.

Now remember... that's the 2nd Law. Not the second theory. We reserve the word Law for things like Gravity... Things that are so obvious that ignoring them is justification for admittance to the Happy Ward where the nice men in their clean white coats can take care of you.

How about a history lesson?

In 1946, Uncle Joe... that's Stalin to you folks who didn't vote Democrat... looked around and realized that the world ran on oil. Unfortunately Ike didn't have the same forsight... Neither did any of his successors. While Kennedy was busy sending us to the Moon to collect useless space rocks.. Joe was pretending to give a damn about Space while he poured millions into Oil Research.

What did the USSR's 50 years of research conclude? It concluded that Oil was Abiotic.

Russia has used this research to become one of the largest oil producing countries in the world. You think they sit around and worry about it running out?

Hell no they don't. They've got decades of peer-reviewed published science that proves that oil is not a fossil fuel... and not only that... its continually renewed. They have documented oil fields that refill. They have documented oil fields that grow faster than they can pump oil out of them.

But we don't know any of this.

Why?

Because we're just as in the dark as the soviet citizens of the Cold War were.

Big Oil wants its product to be rare. How much money could they make if the world found out that their product was practically as common as drinking water?

And its not just them... How do you think the Greenies are going to feel when they realize they are being played? That they are actually Big Oil's best friend? Oh sure... we're running out! The scareder people get.... the more the price of oil goes up. What could be better? And we don't have to worry about it running out... because of two simple reasons...

1) Big Oil isn't stupid. They know when real pressure for alternatives shows up, they'll just "find" a bunch more oil and drop the price for a decade or so.

2) Science has proven time and time again that there isn't just lots of oil... its actually a renewable resource.

The Myth of Fossil FuelsChristmas presents come from Santa. Easter Eggs from the Easter Bunny. Oil comes from Dinosaurs.

As prevelant as the myth of man made global warming is, it pales before the might of this one. Oil comes from dead dinosaurs. Everyone knows it. It may as well be 2+2=4.

Everyone knows it because on their 8th grade biology test they chose A) From decaying dinosaur matter, and got it right. The test said it was right, therefore it is. Likely they never put any more thought into it than that.

But I would challenge you to think just for a moment... about the absurdity of the claim. We know there were just as many dinosaurs in America as there were in the middle east... So why is there more oil there?

And what is it about dinosaurs that made them turn to oil... while everything else doesn't? Or does everything turn into oil over time? And if everything turns to oil over time.. then more oil is created every second of every day all over the world. And what exactly explains the abundance of oil in the deep blue?

Seriously? This is the best explaination science can come up with?

We put a man on the moon decades ago and the best we can do to explain oil is.... ummmm.... The Dinosaurs did it!?

And... IF we know where this stuff comes from... and we have known where it comes from since our grandfathers where in the 8th grade... Why is it that we can't yet make an economicly viable substitute for it?

We can produce gemstones in a lab... but not oil?

Well of course we can't... its not like we have dead dinosaurs laying around now do we?

Hey.... A few more questions... Does Gold come from dinosaurs? How about copper? Phosphates... I'll bet phosphates come from dinosaurs right?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Where Ranger RestsWhat I'm getting ready to tell you really isn't anything to brag about. Every small town in America has some small piece of trivia that the folks pass around. Still... that's maybe what makes it interesting to me.

Back the in eighties... Before the Army vs. Navy football game, several ambitious midshipmen dressed as Army MP's... snuck into West Point, tied up the handlers in a stall, and kidnapped Army's mascot mules; Traveller, Trooper, and Ranger. The prank backfired though... as the mules had to be returned before the game... because Ranger had rebelled and was busy kicking in ever stall they could find.

Navy boys ain't fit to handle West Point Mules.

Ranger eventually retired... I think in 1995. He spent the last ten years of his life grazing on a little hillside off a state highway. His caretakers even got him a donkey named Jenny to keep him company. As he got older Jenny eventually became his eyes and ears on his long walks... and as far as is known... in all the years he was there he only saw fit to leave his retirement facilities once... when he got a wild hair and figured he'd go visit the local bar up the street.

The doorman wouldn't let him in though.

Ranger died in 2005.... he's buried on top of the hill he loved to graze so much. But if you ever find yourself around Burns, Tn... maybe heading north on Highway 96... look off to your right. You'll probly see Jenny out in her pasture...

I guess I wonder how many people drove up and down that highway in those 10 years and saw Ranger and Jenny up there... and just never knew.

Just keep an open mind about what you're lookin' at... Old Mules... and Old Men often have more to 'em then you may think. Sometimes the ordinary ain't ordinary at all.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Black Coaching DisparityI don't know if you've heard... but both Super Bowl coaches this year are black!

Not suprising since blacks are over-represented in NFL coaching. At the begining of this season 6 of the 32 head coaching positions were filled by blacks. That's around 20%. Blacks make up 12% of the total population of the US... that's as of 2005. By comparison.. there is not a single hispanic head coach in the NFL... yet hispanics make up 14% of the US population.

See... in the rest of the world... everyone wants schools, or business, or government... or even social clubs... to resemble society as a whole.

So... if there are X% blacks... in society... there should be X% blacks in whatever position, job, or whatever is in question.

Interestingly enough that isn't at all the standard now being applied to NFL Coaches. The discussion before the AFC Championship game centered around the fact that the racial makeup of coaches is so different than that of the players.

No one seemed to mention that compared to society as a whole... which is the standard for everything else... blacks are over represented in the coaching profession.

What happens if you apply the standard applied to the NFL... IE, let the make up of the group determine the make up of the leadership... to the rest of societies organizations?

How many women would be in leadership positions anywhere?

Outside of sports... how many blacks would be in leadership positions anywhere?

The fact is good enough is never good enough. Equal isn't good enough either.

The bar keeps getting moved.

My position is that there should be no bar at all. Only performance matters. Only qualification matters. Judging by the nature of the Win-at-all-cost climate in the NFL... and the willingness to fire coaches regardless of race (Art Shell... Denny Green and believe me Kentucky's basketball program should take notes here... ) in this case blacks obviously can at least hold their own in a performance only environment of coaching... in fact they do much better than hold their own... of course they do have insentive in their favor.. but hiring incentives only go so far in the cut throat world of the NFL.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

The GamesColts 41 Patriots 17

This isn't even gonna be close. The Patriots have been lucky as all hell to even be here. The Colts on the other hand are a machine. They've proven they can win shootouts. They've proven they can stop the run. And they've proven they can play smashmouth football on the best defense in the NFL.

Now... Ol' Bill is gonna try to run the ball. He's not gonna believe the Colts have really changed their ways... and he's gonna pay for it. The Colts d-line is going to pinch... crushing any hope of a gap... which will force the patriots to try to bounce outside... which plays right to the speed of the colts ends and linebackers.

I know I know... the "experts" say that the patriots can run the ball better than the Ravens. They say the Patriots backs are much better than Jamal Lewis.

So are those patriots backs better than Larry Johnson?

The answer of course is no.

The Patriots don't win games. They sit around and hope the other team beats itself.

The Colts aren't gonna do that.

Bears vs. Saints

I don't care... but I think the Saints will run the ball on the Bears. The Saints have the slowest secondary in the league. Its just ugly. But Chicago has a joke of a QB.

Flip a coin. This game is largely irrelevant... as who ever wins will get totally crushed in the Super Bowl.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

The 16th Street Church BombingOn September 15th, 1963 in Birmingham Alabama... the 16th Street Church was rocked by a bomb.

4 black girls were killed in the blast.

The explosion became the focal point of the civil rights movement.. and much has been written about it.

There is one story that I don't think has been told though... though maybe its just interesting to me.

These days forensic science is the big fad. Using science to solve murder cases is so hip and trendy... all the girls... even Britney Spears say they want to do it. I suppose the funniest thing about that is that people thing this is new.

See... explosive residue was found on a Bible from that church... and it was taken to an ATF lab... where a little greek fella poured over it. He was able to learn everything about it. He was even able to determine where it was purchased. Now remember... this isn't a drama on TV. This is real life. This happened... way back in the stone age of 1963.

The evidence that little greek fella came up with finally ended up putting the guity away... though the prosecutors certainly took their sweet time.

Oh... and that little greek man?

That was my grandfather.

On the one hand I'm proud of the old coot.... on the other I'm discusted as I can be that I had blood kin that was once one of the biggest dogs in the ATF.

Friday, January 19, 2007

ATF!!!Been awhile hasn't it? Fear not friends! I've neither given up booze nor tobacco... and I am as armed as ever. Perhaps more so.

I confess I thought about jumping head long into the comment section below and depantsing Bill with a few scriptural quotes... i don't know... something about knocking the dust from sandles... As opposed to you... running for office and reforming the laws.

But I digress. Friday Night is for merriment. Let us set aside such debate for tomarrow. For tonight... we drink.

Well.. Bill and I do. I suspect Res and UO are as well. And I sincerely hope Holli is to.

And what do we drink?

For me its Knob Creek. Its tough to complain about KC. I'm obviously not fond of the name... but the bourbon is top notch in every way. I am willing to overlook poor marketing.

I regret that I am not currently smoking anything... though there is some black cordial calling my name. Pipes are the best friends... the best.

And the firearms?

You'll be shocked to learn that I carried a Glock 36 all day today. I feel so dirty. Seriously. I wouldn't have felt more girly if I were wearing a pair of frilly pink panties. At least it was a .45... I'll beg your forgiveness... as I was caught without and a potentially dangerous run had to be made for charitible reasons (the trouble with giving is that poor so rarely seem to live in safe neighborhoods).. so I found a shoulder rig and borrowed my wife's weapon.

Any way.. a Glock is better than having nothing at all... I still felt dirty though.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

The Beautiful Holli Asks...Wow! you've really made me think about this Pledge issue, Nate. I never even thought about it being blasphemous before. You'd probably run screaming from my church on "God and Country Day" a.k.a. the Sunday before Memorial Day. There are flags adorning the sactuary and the JNROTC from the local state-run indoctrination day-camp (high school) is there to bring in the colors. We sing the national anthem and all patriotic music in the service.I don't know that I find the pledge blasphemous, though clearly difficulty arises when one tries to explain the difference in pledging allegence to a flag vs. praying to God to a 4-year-old. What is sickening is its recitation in church. What you describe during a sunday service would not result in my running or screaming. It would result however in my making quite a scene. That is blamphemous. Its revolting. Its evil.I admit in the past I've felt strange about having a "rah-rah America" service on what is supposed to be the Lord's Day. DO you and your family celebrate or acknowledge the 4th of July? Is it just the use of the pledge in church or church-school that's got you upset? I truly want to know. This whole idea is foreign to me. Thanks.We do celebrate the 4th. Though we never talk about why we're celebrating. The day is spent with firearms and explosives. The celebration of the 4th is the celebration of the People defeating the Government. It is not a celebration of the United States. After all... what's there to celebrate?

The Church opens itself up to coruption and sin on an unparalled level when it embraces politics. It takes the step to becoming like the liberals... to replace political affiliation with actual work.

"Why should I give to the poor? I vote for congressmen who take care of that stuff."

That's how the liberal mind works. They don't need to help... that's the government's job. When the Church embraces politics it simultenously corrupts its own ideals... and expands the power of government.

Evil and Evil again.

Specificly though... my problem with the pledge is the indoctrination... the psychological damage that it does. To this day I still feel the itch... to stand in a group and praise the flag... its like an amputee that still feels his long missing leg. I know its not real. I know its wrong. But there it is. And that speaks to the power of the indoctrination.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

ProjectsSeveral months ago... perhaps even a year ago... I don't remember exactly... but I made the comment that I was working on something, and if I failed, you'd never hear about it again.

It was something that all gun guys know you just can't do... but something that Hollywood loves.

I'm talking about the myth of the two-gun-shooter.

Oh sure... trick shooters exist. But people like us don't have the time to dedicate to learning.

Well...

I've been working on this for a long time now... and finally I can report that I am servicable with two weapons. By that, I mean at tactical distance... I am tactically accurate. Specificly... two sillohettes side by side... 5 yards in front of me.

I cross draw... a berretta 92F in my left hand... my pt-101 in my right... I draw and fire both single-action. I hit center mass on both targets... every time.

The drill I am working on now... is similar to your standard 2-1 drill... except its done with 2 guns.

So nuts and bolts... what have I learned?

Trigger pull is far more important with two weapons than one. The triggers have to be nearly identical. If one weapon fires a fraction of a second before the other... you end up with a wildly inaccurate shot. I chose the 92f and the 101 because they were the two most similar weapons I had available. I suspect when my two 1911's are done I'll be much better at this game.

Also.... technique is important. I never alternate firing them like you see in movies. An ex-special forces friend of mine told me about shooting two together.... you basically let your sub-conscience triangulate the flight path of each bullet... your arms hands and weapons become extensions of your individual eyes... and the focus point of your eyes becomes the aim point of both weapons. I've had this produce 2 shots in the same hole. I've also had it produce a completely unscathed target.. but that was only at the begining.

Shooting is so much about muscle memory and the subconscience. Get your mind out of its own way and you'll be amazed at how well you can shoot.

I'm not good with two yet. I won't be good until I can run IDPA drills... not that it would be legal... and I'm a long way from that. But someday... maybe.

The Hazards of ParentingI nearly threw up today at supper. But before I regail you with my tales of woe... indulge me... a little background is necessary.

Since we moved back to Tennessee we've allowed ourselves to sink some roots. We found a church we really enjoy... we give a lot there... financially as well as volunteering. Our boys have become quite the little rockstars there, as both are universally loved by all.

Jebidiah has even been going to pre-school there 2 days a week for the last several months.

Now... as I continue with my tale of this evening's unfortunate events... please remember... my son goes to preschool at the church we attend and support.

So.... back to today. Eli had eartubes put in this morning. The little fella (I say little because he's one. He's often mistaken for a 3-year-old by strangers) has had ear infections continuously and we'd had enough. Anyway... all went well. Nana and Papa had been here all day helping with things... and as usuall we sat down for a good family meal.

Also as usual Jeb said he didn't want to say the pre-meal prayer. No biggie. We'll just say a silent prayer. So... after everyone waits for me to take my hat off, we all bow our heads.

Then we notice mumbling... almost sing song.

I look up and see my son sitting across from me... eyes closed... hands clasped together... head bowed...

reciting the Pledge of Alligence.

DrWho later said I exhibited amazing restraint. I didn't interupt him. In fact I praised him. I gave no indication that I desperately wanted to puke.

I felt like my son had been violated.

What is a church preschool doing teaching my kid to recite something like that?

And what am I supposed to do? Apparently the whole class stands up each morning and recites this chant with their hands over their heart like the Hitler Jungen. Thats a powerful thing for a 4-year-old. Its not like I can tell him not to do it. He wouldn't understand. I'm not about to put my kid in that situation. I know full well what kind of damage that can do.

It sounds like he's getting pulled out of pre-school. Which is fine... he wasnt' there to learn anything... we just wanted him to make a friend or two and he's done that. Its not like he particularly enjoys it anyway.

But won't it be interesting around church when we become the couple that pulled their kids out of preschool because they didn't want them to say the pledge?

Won't it be even more amusing when folks assume our problem is with the Under God part? I can't wait to be accused of being a liberal. Wonder how they'll take it when I explain its the whole pledge I can't stand... but mainly its the "indivisible" part that I really can't take.

Honestly the playing of the national anthem and the pledge of allegiance only evokes anger in me. And the idea that my child has now somehow confused the saying of said pledge with prayer... just has me quite nearly blinded by rage.

I find myself in a debate that goes like this:

Keep your reasons to yourself. Just pull Jeb out and shut up.

Don't listen to that do-gooder. Blow up the church.

These people would never deliberately create this situation. Play nice.

Zip it Hippy! NATE! Blow up the church.

Don't listen to that moron Nate. You like these people.

Ah well... I'll keep you updated. I'm sure you'll all get a kick out of it.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

You've Got to be KiddingOne of my all time favorite books is Point of Impact by Steven Hunter. Its a book that focuses on a hard as a rock main character named Bob Lee Swagger.... A decendant Robert E Lee... Who was, in the novel, the most effective sniper in Marine Corp history.

The ballistics are good in the book.. the gun lore is good. Its not without error... but its better than anything else I've read... anywhere. If you spot the mistakes... you're a careful reader... and you more than likely can out shoot just about everyone in your town.

Why do I bring this up?

I was surfing over at ESPN.com... and I see an ad for some moving called "Shooter"... Starring who? Marky Fucking Mark.

No. It can't be.

Apparently it can.

Those cocksuckers in Hollywood have taken one of my favorite all time characters... and cast Marky Fucking Mark to play him.

I'm gonna throw up now...

Then I'm going to start planning the destruction of the US film industry.

Friday, January 12, 2007

What We've LostDaniel 10: 7-127 I, Daniel, was the only one who saw the vision; the men with me did not see it, but such terror overwhelmed them that they fled and hid themselves. 8 So I was left alone, gazing at this great vision; I had no strength left, my face turned deathly pale and I was helpless. 9 Then I heard him speaking, and as I listened to him, I fell into a deep sleep, my face to the ground. 10 A hand touched me and set me trembling on my hands and knees. 11 He said, "Daniel, you who are highly esteemed, consider carefully the words I am about to speak to you, and stand up, for I have now been sent to you." And when he said this to me, I stood up trembling. 12 Then he continued, "Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. 13 But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days. Then Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, because I was detained there with the king of Persia. 14 Now I have come to explain to you what will happen to your people in the future, for the vision concerns a time yet to come."

Angels don't really exist. Demons don't really exist. Right? We moderns have moved beyond all of this mythology! We know that we're the ones in control. Science is our mythology and our own will and work is what determines our path.

of course... the more one tells himself that... the more passages like this slap him in the face. I wish to ask you to consider the consequences of this these verses. Daniel has been fasting and praying for understanding of the End Times. It was God's Will that Daniel be immediately answered, and He dispatched an angel the instant He heard the prayer.

But the angel of God was delayed by the "Prince of Persia". Now the King of Persia was a human being that is mentioned at the very begining of Chapter 10. This was not talking about him. The angel was talking about another spiritual being... who held dominion over Persia. Indeed God's angel was not free to do God's will until Michael, another of God's angels, and a much stronger one, showed up to handle the Prince of Persia himself.

Later in the chapter the angel says that he must return to once again face the Prince of Persia with Michael, and he points out that the Prince of Greece is on his way.

This is but one example of many throughout the Bible... verses here and there that we've ignored quite deliberately.

See... we don't really often sit down and just read the Word. We get a study manual which tells us to skip around from here to there... so we get what the author wants us to get. Verses like this one never seem to make it into those manuals.

The questions it raises are legitmate and important though. The Western demythologized version of Christianity is the new thing. Its the isolated system. The old teachings... the old church... the orthodox church... they are still well aware of a spiritual battle between spiritual forces among us.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Trilogy Discussion: Eternal Warriors by Theodore Beale*** Warning: This is more of a discussion than a review. There are likely SPOILERS throughout. Do not read this if you're looking for something to help you decide to read these books. This is a discussion for those who've already read them.***

As another has stated in a similar, if more specific review, there are basic biases that some of us have, and they should be stated at the outset. I have frequented Mr Beale's blog for years and am a regular commenter there. In fact, were it not for him and his blog, this blog would not exist. That said, since I am attempting to review all three books at one time in one post... I am going to limit it and avoid the standard format. Upon request a standard format book review may be provided. Also, I did not read the books in their chronological order. I was feelin' a little Star Wars that week, so I started with The World in Shadow, then read The Wrath of Angels, then finished with the War in Heaven.

Book I: The War in Heaven

From a purely subjective standpoint this was by far my least favorite of the books. It just didn't have the hook the other two did. Honestly if I had read this one first I wouldn't have read the other two, and it would've been a great loss. The negatives:

Character: Christopher's skeptism waxes and wanes randomly. While in the other books he is rock solid and his actions are as predictable as your best friend's, in this one the author seems to know what he wants to do with him, but he doesn't know how to make him do it... consequently Christopher jumps around like a puppet with unpredictable strings. His motivations are overlooked and inconsistent, which would be fine for a teenager, if the author had convinced you that it was done diliberately. In this case he doesn't. This struck me as odd, considering that Christopher's character strikes me as almost completely autobiographical in nature. But Theo's been transformed since those days, and I wonder if the change has been so complete that it even affected his ability to relate to his past. It wouldn't be the first time. At any rate this book should've been a fantasy version of Conrad's great A Heart of Darkness. Sadly it falls way short. There is no journey to darkness for Christopher. There is a light switched that gets flipped one way for evil... then there is a journey into power... not deeper into evil... then at the end its flipped again... and poof.. he's good. Its all difficult to accept.

Character: The twins are not particularly twin like. Not at all. This at least is maintained throughout the books though again, it doesn't strike me as deliberate. For example, in this book Holly references her twinness and is a little put of when its not noticed enough. Are they twins or aren't they?

Fun Factor: I didn't know how else to head this criticism so I went with that. This is by far the least readable of the books. Its not hard to follow or overly complex... it's just irritating. For every excellent battle scene... there is a lame one. Plus the whole thing was eggregiously anti-climactic. The Lord may not be have to actually exert effort to defeat Satan... but that doesn't mean it won't happen with style! Help a brother out here. Yes... God wins in the end and all is good and well... but its not very fun.

Character: As much as I was biased in favor of this trilogy, I was biased against this book... but I didn't know it until I got into it. I hated Christopher. I can understand a teen atheist fascinated with the cool aspects of the fallen. What I can understand is, once it was demonstrated that his atheism was false... where was his critical thinking? Why, when he was moved to start to question everything, did he question nothing? Thing of this as one specific example of the same criticism above.

Setting: For an overtly Christian book, the endless droning about the beauty of satan and the glory of this or that demon or this or that demonic structure... and the almost... dismissive discriptions of Heaven and the Lord were irritating.

Plot: I understand that the constant references to various Geek Games gives this book considerable Geek Cred... but I apologize... I cannot for a second accept that the strategical mind of a 16 year old Geek is superior to that of Angelic Generals who witnessed our world's creation. There are limits to suspended disbelief.

Sky's blue, Water's Wet, First Books suck. That's just the way it is. So it is with practically everyone. One must learn on the job. From the next two reviews, I believe you will see that at least in my opinion, Mr Beale clearly did.

Book II: The World in Shadow

First let me say that it is not necessary to put yourself through War in Heaven to enjoy this one. Hints are dropped about Christopher's previous ordeal, but as I was reading, I simply vaguely aware that he'd been through some bad voodoo mess and it had all worked out, though changing him and scarring him up a bit. It made him a great deal more likeable, and the wondering made it more interesting. Think about it like the opposite of Vader. Knowing the good guy was once a Dark Side Bad Ass somehow makes him cooler. But knowing the Bad Guy was once a do-gooder kid doens't quite help as much.

I loved this book from begining to end. Except of course the soccer parts... but they were well executed. Gone are the clumsy character issues so prevelant in Christopher in WiH. I wish I had reviewed this one before reading WiH... as I am sure I had some negatives for it, but its so much better in comparison I simply am at a loss. I may have to re-read it.

If the first book is Christopher's.... then this book is Jami's. It focuses on her a great deal more, and honestly her character doesn't fit at all with the girl of the first book. I can accept the change, as like Christopher she is now a christian. Unfortunately the change is such that she's to different. Everything is different. To different to quickly. There is no development. It just instantly is. That's hard to accept. Its the same problem with Christopher in the first book, only with him it happens twice, first when he goes bad, second when he goes good. Now I only bring it up because this is a critique of the whole trilogy, not just the one book. If you've not read WiH then you won't notice this. You will only know Jami as the tomboy of the twins... so again, in the order I read the books, it worked out fine.

The two antagonists of this book, at least the human ones, are tempted and fall at a much more relaxed pace than Christopher did. Its well reasoned and the psychology fits a great deal better. Without giving anything away I'll just say that the book focuses on a high school shooting rampage and the psychological and spiritual battles that lead up to it.

The one nit I can pick is... Where is Christophers super-bad sword from the first book?

This one is way more fun that the first. So much so that I literally read it in one morning. Its edgy and dark and strikes me as anything but a Jesus-freak book.

Book III: The Wrath of Angels

By this point its clear Theo knows what he's doing, especially in a marketing standpoint. People love things that they are familiar with. In the first two it was Geek Games... in this one it is the continual reference to legend and literature. Everything from Excaliber to the Loch Ness Monster is hit and if you remember Midsummer Nights Dream you'll find yourself chuckling most of the way through this.

I dearly loved this book. The action and character aspects were not just better than the other two... they were excellent by any standard. I'll leave you with the biggest plus, and biggest minus.

Minus:Consistancy. This is Holli's book, but a few things from the first two are either changed or ignored. Holly's angel for example describes her as being the least in tune to the spiritual world, but in the first book she was by far the most in tune. She saw and felt things her twin could not. Also... the enormously powerful artifact that Christopher wielded so often in the first book is ignored not just in this book but in the previous as well. Its referenced as only a cross around a kids neck... and yet several times when the kid really needed a weapon... it was no where to be found.

***update***My biggest gripe of course... Where was Herne at the end? The whole intro is devoted to him.. He kicks ass in one section, or at least it is so mentioned.. Puck is ordered to go find him... and then that's it. He's never mentioned again. WTF????

Plus: As good as the action is... its the dialog in this book that Mr Beale should be the most proud of. Its clever, but not to clever. Its humorous. Its realistic. Its smooth. Honestly... its the best written dialog I've read in a fantasy novel... maybe ever.

Overall

If Mr Beale could go back and rewrite The War in Heaven... and I'd wager he'd like to... this would be a bona-fide rock star of a trilogy. The other two are that good. While traditionally the second book of any trilogy is the weak link, in this case, its clearly the first. Its just clearly not up to the standard of the others.

As a trilogy though I highly recommend it. Or at least, reading the second two, and perhaps skipping the first.

Monday, January 08, 2007

What did we learn tonight? We learned the same lesson we learned in 1992. Never... Never... Never disrespect the SEC champion.

I've thought all week that this Ohio State team felt a lot like the 1992 Miami team... the one that was destroyed by Alabama... shocking all the talking heads. Its amazing how after the games they all stand around and say things like, "How did we not see this coming?"

Lets look at the facts.

1- Ohio State didn't play a good offense all year long.

2- Ohio State didn't play a good defense all year long.

3- Ohio State has a bunch of big slow players.

4- Florida has a bunch of players who're just as big, if not bigger.. but they are also fast.

5- as always... speed kills.

And how about this... Ohio state is 0-8 against SEC teams in bowl games.

Let me repeat that.

Ohio State has NEVER beaten an SEC team in a bowl. Coincidence? No. I think not. South Carolina even dominated them twice... in back to back bowl games. Its one thing to get smacked around by Bama or Tennessee... but to drop two bowl games in a row to South Carolina? Wow... there's a football powerhouse for ya.

Listen carefully. Ohio State was never the best team in the country this year. They probably were never even in the Top 4 or 5. USC... Florida... LSU... Auburn... hell... Boise State... Louisville... West Virginia... any of those teams would've spanked Ohio State tonight. I 'bout half think Wisconsin would've beaten them tonight.

So they beat Meeeechigan? So freakin' what? Vandy held Meeechigan to fewer points than the vaunted ohio state D... and Florida's offense couldn't do crap against Vandy's D.

What did we learn? Well... we should've learned nothing. We should've know (and some of us did) that if these two teams played 10 times... Florida would win 9 of them. Even Herbstreit admitted it. How would Ohio State beat this team?

They wouldn't. They couldn't. Ever.

So.... Take the heisman and run Troy Smith. Your career ends the same way so many hyped heisman winners ends... Like... Eddie George... Like Gino Toretta... ect ect ect...

It ends with you laying on your back... starring up at some defensive lineman from an SEC defense faster than anything you've seen in your life... wondering where you are... and what will make the pain stop.

So Big Ten Fan... here's to you... the team that dominated your league just got sodomized on National TV by an SEC team that didn't run the table, and might not have even been the best in the conference.

I was all excited about posting a half-time update of the Championship Game... which is much more like your typical SEC administered Big10 ass kicking... when I found my brothers had apparently created a three way conversasion on MSN... and included me... even though I was not around.

When I read the conversation... I was stunned... and I decided that you folks just had to see for yourselves.

You have no idea how badly I wish I was making this up. Pay particular attention to JAC's favorite song... as well as his use of creative netspeak.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

And Then There Were...I guess this was about... what... early November I suppose. I drove home with the boys from Murfreesboro. DrWho had been out shopping all day and we'd spent the day with Nana and Papa seeing what troubles we could stir up. Anyway...

DrWho says she has something for me... and hands me a suspicious looking gift bag.

I removed the contents to find...

wait for it....

Yes. That NB stands for NewBorn. The medical community says its to early to know the sex of the wee child, but its a boy. For those keeping score... Nate Jr, third born son of a third born son, will arrive sometime in early July.