Gargle Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

Three Badass Mice walk into a bar.

Three mice walk into a bar.

The first mouse takes a swig of his beer and says, "I am a badass mouse. In my neighborhood, we have these big mousetraps. I'm so tough that I walk up to them, grab the cheese, catch the bar and press it up and down with one arm while I eat the cheese. I'm a badass mouse."

The second mouse takes a couple swigs of his beer and says, "That's nothin'. In my neighborhood we have that rat-poison stuff. I grab it, throw it in my water and gargle it. It ain't nothin'. I'm a badass mouse."

The third mouse slams his beer, gets up, and starts walking away. The other two ask, "Where are you going?" The third mouse looks at them and says, "I'm going home to screw the cat."

A woman goes to a church and confesses to the priest there. "Bless me father, for I have sinned. I have seen another man's privates."