Friday, November 11, 2005

hi how are youi'm finelovely weather today, huhyeah kinda cold though wish it'd warm up someso how was your dayyou know same old sameso should the texans draft bush or youngdoesn't really matter, they'll probably still suckso what are you doing this weekendnothing much

2006 Mazda Miata - saw one the other day while at happy hour at Sherlock's Pub. Great car - was candy apple red. yummy.

2001 Mazda MiataMy car - 2001 Mazda Miata. Great little car, great on corners. Have taken many corners on 290, Beltway 8, I-10 at 60mph. I love to drive on long trips - my favorite is cruising down the seawall on Galveston Island.

Highly recommend taking a test drive for anyone. I'm 6'2" and fit in it just fine.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Okay today is the second week of volleyball playoffs. We have an excellent chance of winning tonight. So drinks on me if we win. As long as we play our game (bump, set, spike - three hits) I feel confident. Besides we have played this team before and we're much better than they are.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

You may not know her name, but Renee Thomas' story isgaining national attention. Like Rosa Parks, Reneewas tired after a long day of work. She just wantedto relax and have sex with fellow Carolina Pantherscheerleader Angela Keathley in a public restroom.Like Rosa Parks, Renee was arrested.That's what happens to pioneers. Let's make sure thatRenee's arrest is not in vain. Something needs to bedone to protect the rights of hot lesbian cheerleadersto fuck in public bathrooms.

Someone needs to organize massive protests. A MillionMuff Muncher March if you will. I see thousands ofcheerleaders in tight white t-shirts marchingon Washington. They start to riot. They hurlpom-poms at the police. They make rude formations,and do cheers that are not only mean spirited, butthat also show little regard for traditional rhymeschemes and meter. A couple of the girls go at it inthe Lincoln Memorial, right on Lincoln'slap!

Then the police have no choice but to turn the firehoses on them. The cheerleaders scream as theirshaky pyramids come crashing down. Their firmyoung breasts heave under gauzy white t-shirts thatare now suddenly translucent. The cold water causestheir nipples to stiffen and to reach new heights inrigidity! Some of the cheerleaders remove theirsoaking panties in protest. Hopefully, the major newsoutlets will realize the historical significance ofthis moment and show it over and over again:ideally in slow motion.

I know what you're thinking. Angela Keathley is notthat hot. She has a huge nose. But you're probablythinking about her mug shot. I'm sure withsome make-up she looks pretty good. In the mug shotshe does not have any on. Why? Because while youwere sitting at home ignoring injustice allaround you, Angela had her face buried in ReneeThomas' lap: licking, sucking, nibbling, and fightingfor what she believed in. And if her carefullyapplied lipstick, eyeliner, and blush were reduced tonothing more than random splotches on Thomas' creamythighs, I think that's a small price to pay forliberty.

And don't forget the Panther TopCats are hardly theDallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. Some of them are realpigs. A lot of them look like old transvestites. Iwould have probably done Meagan, Allison or Misty.Meagan is the hottest, but Misty looks really slutty,and she has that stripper name.

Cheerleaders need to organize fuck-ins. There shouldbe cheerleaders fucking in every bathroom in thecountry. And it shouldn't be just cheerleaders: allhot lesbians need to do their part. Are you listeningRosie O'Donnell? Stay home.

And on the subject of Rosie, why has Hollywood beensilent? Where is Denise Richards, who owes her entirecareer to her Sapphic turn in "Wild Things".Where are Gina Gershon and Jennifer Tilly? Where isPortia de Rossi? Why are they not speaking out? Andmore importantly, why are they not making out?

I have a dream, that one day, in the not so distantfuture; a small child will look up at me in wild eyedwonder and ask, "Grandpa, is it true therewas a time when cheerleaders were not allowed to havesex in public restrooms?" I'll just laugh and say,"Yes, but that was a long time ago."He'll smile as a wave of relief washes over him. ThenI'll tell him he was adopted and he'll cry like alittle bitch.