Imagine what it has witnessed. Swaying drunks supporting their heads on the wall and weeing on their shoes. Day in, day out. You would cry too, if it happened to you.

“Good day, I recently spotted this tearful slave elephant busily washing away men’s urine, pubic hair, phlegm, bogies, jizz etc., and thought of you. I’d hasten to add that I don’t normally think of men in toilets (I presume you are a man?) or actively use a camera in one either. Pic taken on my work mobile (some basic Nokia effort). Please don’t use my real name – let me think up a random one… how about ‘George Michael'” – George Michael.