Prince George's County chupacabra caught on video

Chain-smoking employees at Prince George's Hospital Center captured a hideous, hairless creature — a chupacabra, some say — in the woods where the exiled smokers congregate. And then, unbelievably, they let the rare specimen go, depriving it of years of torture at the hands of scientists.

They had spotted the animal — which has drawn comparisons to a deer, dog, rat, kangaroo, and fox — several times near the Cheverly hospital, and last Thursday decided to lure it into a cage with chicken and leftover Chinese food. They named it Prince Chupa, after the legendary chupacabra — Spanish for "goat sucker" — which probably doesn't exist, but would make the world a more exciting place if it did.

Before a biologist could take a DNA sample, though, these tobacco addicts let the Cheverly Chupacabra go. How unfortunate. It should've been donated to the National Zoo, where it would've become their most popular exhibit, or at least held until Gawker could get a first-hand look. Those guys are obsessed.