1.27.2013

The Meaning of No End

Have you ever wanted something so bad that when you got it, you were trying to remember what it was you really wanted?

At last complaint post, I was getting use to being 'further afield from home'. The mastering of Scottish slang, lack of certain major household appliances, and death by dietary bombardment; i.e. fish suppers, stovies, and mince & skurlie.

Doing what I do best, I got wrapped up in what I had pictured the romantic Scotland to be and what 'really' was the day to day norm. Resuming the 9-5 job, running for groceries and hoovering the carpet. You get the general idea? It's called l-i-f-e.

I came across this post several months ago and I saved it. It was like a frying pan to the face (but in a good way) This is what Evan Lenz, who I have no idea who he is, wrote;

"Have you ever been in the middle of following your dream before you then came back to your senses? Did you really come to your senses, or just fall back into your fears?

Try coming to your senses instead. Look, listen, feel. Notice that the walls aren't literally caving in around you. The waters aren't literally rising. Then go back to following your dream.

THIS experience was my 'push back to my senses'. To you it will most likely be a long, repetitious, video of a slow moving procession of pipers and their groupies. But this was the moment I jumped back into my dream and had that out-of-body experience. THESE were the moments that I could not believe I was smack dab in the middle of. I had just seen (in the flesh) Queen Elizabeth, Prince Philip, Princess Ann, Prince Charles and Camilla, (as if that wasn't chart topping enough) but yet it was this moment I recognized as being the moment that was the moment of all.

Picture this - you are encompassed by the hum of the pipes and beat of the drums as you march through movie-set perfect Braemar. Men, woman and kids wearing their clan proud kilts. Tartan exploding as bodies march in rhythmic step. This quine (Scottish for woman) could have been herded off the edge of Ben Nevis with nae a care in the world!

The moral of the story - dreams stay a dream until they become reality. Reality means, 'something that exists independently of any ideas concerning it.

On our flight home from spending Christmas in the states I chose to watch the movie, 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel'. It was another one of those 'frying pan to the face' moments with dialog that sums up the means to an end, or is it really an end at all?

"But it's also true that the person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing. All we know about the future is that it will be different. But perhaps what we fear is that it will be the same. So we must celebrate the changes".

"The only real failure is the failure to try, and the measure of success is how we cope with disappointment".

91 comments:

I have tremendous admiration and respect for you. You are living life to the fullest, not just an imaginary life. It takes courage and a very strong woman to follow her dream.Like "The Best Marigold Hotel" when abroad it is our attitude to life which is important and how we embrace change. It is easy for many to say "back in Indiana we do it like this"(no offence intended to Indiana folks).

Braemar. How wonderful.My dream this year is another trip to your new land! We are in the planning stages now! The recent passing of my mother has sharpened my senses to how little time we really have. Risks, change, fearlessness... we simply must embrace them to live a life sans regret!xoxo,p

So glad you had "the moment." Seems that everything has a honeymoon phase and it takes patience and the right mindset to move past the discontent to the next reward. Your post was a great reminder of that - thanks!

Also - my husband, daughter and I are headed to Scotland for week in March. http://mynottinghill.blogspot.com/2013/01/going-to-scotland-in-march-advice.html If you have any tips, I'd love to hear them. Hope this finds you well.

You are living my dream! I have dreamed of moving to Scotland ever since I set foot on the shore, sadly I do not think it will ever happen but one never knows. My husband keeps reminding me that we actually have to be fiscally responsible about life...hmm, do dreams actually take that into consideration?

I am so excited for you and your adventures, you are not only living your life but your dreams as well. Yes the tasks of everyday life sometimes get in the way but when you are having your adventures I am sure that these things fall by the wayside if only for that moment.

Enjoy it all for sometime soon you will be back here in the USA wishing your were there.

Of all the trips we took to London and the UK , I never got to visit Scotland .. land of my grandfather and the stuff of so many of my dreams !I am such a sucker for bagpipes and don't even get me started about men in kilts :)this was wonderful .. thank you for this.Enjoy ..

It's fun to hear about your adventures in your new life. Having been here for 17 years, I suppose some of the magic has worn off, but not much. I've not seen any royalty in person, but given that they publish their itinerary on the internet, it's only because I haven't tried. I'm glad it's still exciting for you. Moving countries is hard work, but it sounds as though you're doing well.

Hello Deb:We have such tremendous admiration for your ability and strength to cope with life changing experiences and to make the most of them. This is by no means always easy, far from it, and the glamour of a new adventure soon wears off as one comes face to face with the realities of a very different life.

But, you know so well how to appreciate and live in the moment, something we try to do as we are ever mindful that tomorrow is an uncertain future.

There is something primeval in the sound of bagpipes and drums that really does stir the soul and lift the spirits. Braemar looks to be incredibly beautiful. We are great fans of Scotland and have good friends in the Borders.

Than heavens for the frying pans Deb, they jolt us back into either reality or the dream...sometimes both! Glad you have your feet planted once again on wet moss...and just keep looking at those uncaving walls and eating all those wonderfully named Scottish yummy's...maybe Graham and Buffy can do the Hoovering though.Whether you know it or not, you're an inspiration to millions...especially because of your everyday life, which truly is a dream one...groceries, job, and all.Big hugs...xoxo J~

Lovely post... You have it so right... As I went ICE FISHING for the first time this week... I realized how many things I haven't done since moving to Norway... I LOVE Scotland.. I am going to have to come visit you! LOL...

Dear sweet Deb,It's the end of a very long day here. The best part of today really. I'm snuggled down under the covers ~ the only warmth is from the glow of my iPad.MR. Sawing Logs is here too!

Before I turn in I wanted to stop by for a visit. I miss you, and besides I sleep better after reading your words ~ they are always comforting.All I can say is, sounds like you've got your big girl panties on!Right on!

To qoute one of your more eloquent readers~"Whether you know it or not, you're an inspiration to millions...especially because of your everyday life, which truly is a dream one...groceries, job, and all."She literally took the words right out of my mouth!

My handsome lumberjack has now moved into a quiet(er) rhythm so I will close.Nighty-Night Duchess. XO

Oh Deb, I loved hearing from you! I'll start checking your blog regularly now. I played catch-up with your other posts.I think you're amazing. It's a huge life change and you're hanging in there and making the most of it. We never stop growing, do we? Even when we're forced into it. :)It was a great movie and I love the quotes you chose. So true.Sending you a big hug and a Happy New Year!

I feel your pain, sister! When I moved to Wales, and lived in London during the weeks for the first few months, I felt like I was constantly on the move. Going to and from work, dealing with being in two places each week and nailing down the logistics of that, learning a new job, the Tube, directions, everything.

But I did the same thing. Slowed down a little bit, started looking around for special moments, making the time to go to museums, taking advantage of all that both places had to offer... and then things became much easier.

i'm dreaming of more posts from deb...so glad to hear of your "dreamy reality" darling.i'm looking most forward to more moments of such silly gratitude i sometimes have to find a stranger to revel in the awesomeness of it....even if it is just the way a stupid candle smells in a local drugstore....true story "herb, crazy lady on aisle 9 bothering our customers again." i just can't help myself. love,katie

I packed up and expatriated to a tiny beach-side village on the Pacific coast of Mexico 13 months ago. I'd always wanted to live abroad --all my aunts and uncles were born in different countries, so I come by it honestly-- and while I'm glad I did it, I certainly miss a good deal of "home."

What you said about wanting something so bad and so long really rang true. Not about Mexico, but about Barcelona. The fella and I went there on a recon mission since we'd shortlisted it for a potential next move. We'd been dreaming about Barcelona --the football, the food, the architecture!-- for almost two years.

When we got there, it was terrible. Spain is going through a lot of trouble now, and especially Catalunya so we expected it to be tense, but it was worse than tense. We tried to make the best of it, but it was heartbreaking and we both kicked ourselves for building it up so much in our heads.

Thankfully we spent a week in Rome right after and fell in love. Spain can have its ham and hatefulness, we'll take the Eternal City every time.

Happy 2013, Deb!! This year rocks especially when you're posting ... thank you for this. I have such a jaded view of SoCal and all of my celeb neighbors and sightings, etc. But, you know that i'm the Anglophile from waaaaayback, so this post just about did it for me. My fix, that is. The Queen? An actual Queen sighting??? (quine!) awesomeness, girl.

I'm with you ... "may the adventures never end"!!!! keep 'em coming, kid.

Hi again Deb,love the photo of you. Life is no bowl of cherries is it. Scotland looks like fun and interesting. Do the guys look like Mel Gibson? I have a change in my lifestyle too, just go with the flow. It's always a new Day.yvonne

A spooky post this. Our house in Stirling borders onto Braemar Terrace & it is called 'Invercauld' after the Laird's castle in Royal Deeside. And all this tucked up in the wilds of the Hills above Adelaide on the other side of the world. This of course, means that we are joined at the hip forever.Millie xx

So true! I look back on my time on NYC and kick myself for not getting out and doing more and not being so bogged down by the mundane stuff. I should have explored more, gone to more shows, eaten at more restaurants. And then my NY adventure was over. Live and learn, and LIVE! xoxo

Deb, watched the movie, pretty town. Lucky you, getting to see the Queen. My dream was to live in Paris for one year. At least you are having an adventure. Enjoy the life.yvonnecan't read that damn code..

Hi Deb!So long since I have had a chance to comment...... I appreciate your good vibes and support and know you are in the best place...... Grat Post! You are becoming more Scottish , please tell me when you make your first Haggis? Haggish?Miss you.......So great you got to see the Royals........ They don't have a heart as big as yours. ;)Maryanne xo

The memory of that sound and that march will stay in your heart forever. I know, because the tears are rolling down my face right now. Those darn bag pipes do it to me every time. Love your life RIGHT NOW, that's all any of us have. Working thru' the homesickness, the bored moments, the disappointments, all the challenges, is going to make you one strong lady. Have fun, and good luck. The journey continues, if you're lucky.

This will sound funny, but sometimes I am jealous of myself :) I think how cool would it be to live in England with my family?! And then I think,ah but I am! I think I get in the haze of the grocery shopping, errands, laundry, and the rest that I could be doing anywhere. But I'm not just anywhere. I'm doing laundry in England :)

So well said Deb...so interesting to think back on those early days, when you first arrive in a country. Especially when you pass the three month, six month..one year marks..each one as revealing as the one before. You come into your own and you move forward. I look at each day as an adventure and decide what I will make happen on that day. I am so excited for your new flat and all the changes you have made in your life. I remember writing to you before you left the USA for the first time. I am excited for your news, your children's engagements yet at the same time I know what that must feel like inside..wanting to be there. For all the excitement, the adventure..the buzz..we do have those moments when we want to knock our head against a wall.

Once that feeling subsides..we pick up move on and look for the next adventure and oh the tales we can tell...

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I will always be and shall ever be a fan of London culture. I don't know, but I'm fascinated with the way the London people live their life to the extent that, I, myself designed my home with a touch of London in it. I'm just thrilled with it, I look forward in visiting the city soon.

Debbie, You did live in Houston, right? Then you were in Seattleright? well, I have a friend thinking of moving to Seattle, I hope my memory is right. Did youlike Seattle? Gosh!! I hope I have this right. yvonne

Wow! Seems like you do enjoy your attendance in the said event, well, who wouldn't be the celebration looks fun and it shows the colorful and fresh side of London. Well, the royalty-inspired events are quite fascinating that even me would love to design my own home, based on this kind of idea.

Wow, truly an inspiring blog. I would definitely agree to your views. In life, all it takes is a risk. Everything in life is a result from risk. Would you agree? Yes I do. Life is not sweet as sugar nor does it end in happy endings. If you want something, risk for it.

The bedroom looks adorable, exactly what a girl needs. When you have white walls every bit of color seems to really pop. The elephant lamp is my favorite piece. I love the animal theme. I can’t wait to see what you come up with for your own child’s room.

The bedroom looks adorable, exactly what a girl needs. When you have white walls every bit of color seems to really pop. The elephant lamp is my favorite piece. I love the animal theme. I can’t wait to see what you come up with for your own child’s room.

It is funny but life will follow us every that we go. This reminds me of a quote by Michelangelo Buonarroti “The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.” Dreams are worth dreaming.

Ok, so my last comment here was in January when I was coming off of the holiday high. So much life has happened since then as you know and I completely lost any desire to love anything about where we are until summer. MR. invited me to tag along to a horse farm last weekend and for the first time in a long while I was reminded why we love this place. Life is funny.XO

Wow! You are certainly living your dream and that is great to see! I'm glad to hear that quote made you realize that you were doing the right thing and kept you on track. Unfortunately, too many of us are held back by fear. Sometimes I wonder if it is a fear of succeeding.

It's always been my dream to go tour the city of London and visit the country of Britain. I just think that they really have a one of a kind culture amongst the other. I even collected some English stuff cause I'm just so hooked with it.

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