Feminist, Writer, Geek

Rejection

If you’re a writer, you’d better learn to make peace with rejection. You know what it’s like when you’re dating and trying to find someone you can actually get along with? That’s what it’s like for your poor writing, venturing out in the world looking for a match.

So…what do you do when it’s YOUR writing being rejected? I suggest the following steps:

After a handful of rejections on the same piece, though, I think it’s time to pull your work back and give it a read. Ask yourself: Is this as good as it can be? Is this getting rejected NOT because I haven’t found the right home, but because there’s something wrong with the piece?

To get back to that dating metaphor, sometimes when you go on a date, the other person’s a perfectly fine human being, but you just don’t feel it. If that’s what’s going on with your story, okay. Keep at it. But sometimes when you go on a date, you see significant deal-breaking red flags in the other person. Is your story a date full of red flags? Ack! Revise!

If you’ve received any personal rejections–as opposed to form rejections–THAT STUFF IS GOLD. Gold. Pay attention to what they say! Revise! There is NOTHING more helpful than a personal rejection that gives you something to work on! I recently received a personal rejection that pointed out a problem with the opening of a story–something I’d never noticed (ACK) and none of my readers ever noticed (DOUBLE ACK). I am incredibly thankful for that editor’s comments and used them to revise the story.

I thought I’d collect some of the best writerly quotes about rejection, so I can read them and feel better when needed. Perhaps you’ll enjoy them, too.

“This manuscript of yours that has just come back from another editor is a precious package. Don’t consider it rejected. Consider that you’ve addressed it ‘to the editor who can appreciate my work’ and it has simply come back stamped ‘Not at this address’. Just keep looking for the right address.” – Barbara Kingsolver

“Remember: when people tell you something’s wrong or doesn’t work for them, they are almost always right. When they tell you exactly what they think is wrong and how to fix it, they are almost always wrong.” – Neil Gaiman

“Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.” – C. S. Lewis

“To ward offa feeling of failure,she joked thatshe could wallpaperher bathroom withrejection slips,which she chose notto see as messagesto stop, but rather as ticketsto the game.”
– Anita Shreve from “The Last Time They Met”