Real Feelings.

Some Old Bro Went To Washington

Couple old bros just hanging out total brostyle.

Who this old bro in the dope robes? How come him make all the news? Who is this, bro?

Him got to meet President Barack Hussein Obama, First Lady Michelle, Bo, Sunny. He gave a speech, he hit up a totally sick Church crawl AND brought the city of Warshington D.C. to its knees with droves of fabulous Warshingtonians trying to get #blessed by his Broliness.

In all seriouserity, I don’t really understand why everyone is so hyped on this old bro, you know? Don’t get me wrong, he seems totally chill. He was all like, “Help Syrian refugees! Earth too dang hot, yo! Poor people need help!” That’s pretty cool but only because it’s like for the longest time I thought that faith was synonymous with like totally being ignorant.

Some stats:

Eighty-three percent of Americans identify themselves as Christians, 22 percent of that 83 are Catholics. 53 percent of Americans are Protestants. Nineteen percent of Americans say they’re Protestants, but don’t cite a specific denomination. They account for more than a third of all Protestants. Another 15 percent of Americans identify themselves as Baptists or Southern Baptists, meaning this group accounts for nearly three in 10 Protestants. No other Protestant denomination comes close in size.

What all this percentage jibberjabber means is that most American Christians, as outlined by their faith, reject the papacy entirely. Protestants and Baptists believe in the authority of faith and the Bible alone. They don’t get down with some old bro going around calling himself the Vicar of Christ.

So tell me. Who this old bro in the dope robes? How come him make all the news? Learn some f*cking theology, news, because technically, no one should be giving a damn about his trip to the US. Just the 1.2 billion Catholics of the world, which only make up 17% of Earth’s population.