Sunday, January 20, 2013

When Is Enough Enough?

Over the past few years, I have learned quite a few things about walking away. I believe there is a distinct difference between walking away and giving up.

When you give up, it's because you have tried and tried and don't believe you can overcome the challenge. You have convinced yourself that the only outcome is failure, and as such, you decide to stop trying.

But I believe that walking away is different. Walking away is when you realize that the obstacle or challenge is no longer worth the effort. Not because you don't feel like you can succeed, but because it does not provide you with enough positive return for you to continue to pursue it.

I've discovered this as a result of most in relationships - friends, lovers, coworkers. When something stops giving you enough return, it's okay to say, "I'm done." That said, I think this is one of the hardest things to do. You know what the relationship could be if it wasn't what it is, and letting go of the hope of what it could be is like letting go of a favorite pair of jeans. They were good while they lasted, but now they're frayed, torn, and can hardly do what they were meant to do in the first place - cover your ass!

But...there is a delightful silver lining. Just like the favorite pair of jeans, you walk away knowing something. You know what it is that made them great, or in the case of the relationship, what it was that made it fail, and now you can recognize it, and act on it, before it makes you miserable.

I have been one to resist change as long as possible, but once I stop resisting, I throw myself into it with as much fervor and enthusiasm as I can muster, and every time, it has been worth it. I've come out stronger, and things have changed for the better.