97704: He promised to marry her; does he have any marital rights

I have a female friend who got to know a young man; circumstances prevented him from proposing to her before he travelled, but he made a pledge that she is his wife before Allah and he intends to marry her when he comes back. Does he have any marital rights over her? Can he see her over the Internet without hijab?.

Published Date: 2012-03-05

Praise be to Allaah.

The mere fact that your friend got to know this young man and
he promised to marry her does not make her his wife under any circumstances.
It is not permissible for him to see her and he has no marital rights over
her, because the marriage contract was not done between them; rather she is
a non-mahram to him.

His saying to her, “You are my wife before Allah” is not
correct, because she is not his wife, either before Allah or before the
people. The marriage contract is not done with words such as this; rather it
is essential that there be the proposal and acceptance, in the presence of
her guardian and with his approval, and in the presence of two Muslim
witnesses.

So long as none of that has happened, she is not his wife.

What this sister has to do is fear Allah with regard to her
relationship with this man and others. It is not right for a Muslim woman to
get to know young men who are not her mahrams, even if she likes their
character or religious commitment, as she thinks. If he wants to marry her
then he has to approach the matter properly, through his family and her
family. In the answer to questions no.
36618,
23349 and
78375 you will find a detailed
discussion on the ruling on forming relationships with non-mahram men and
the ruling on corresponding with them.

These relationships and haraam promises lead to nothing but
evil and corruption.