The Imposter Syndrom

A lot of you have asked me how I’m holding up after the incident. I am doing very well! In fact, I forgave him and moved on so fast because why would I waste my time crying when the guy has probably forgotten about it and is looking for new prey?

Also, that right there is a blatant lie. Did I mention that the guy is my classmate? I was therefore resigned to the fact that I was going to see him almost every single weekday of the semester. The sight of him was enough to make me relive that night. And to think that he would have the guts to come to me and say hi! As our eyes met, I felt the aplopletic beast within me break the shackles and chains that constrained it. Indeed, I felt like giving the hideous guy a slap that would dislocate his jaw. It took a great deal of self control keep me rooted to the spot and instead give a high pitched ‘I’m fine.’

Every night my pillow got drenched in tears. I was hurting. How easy it is to rid one of their sunshine! However one can only be angry and hurt for so long. After a long struggle, I actually began to see the good side of what had happened. Yes, you heard me right. I was progressing, baby step by baby step. I am very thankful to my friends. They listened to me and never once did they made comments such as, “But you are the one who took yourself to the slaughter house!”, “That is nothing, there are many people out there who are going through far much worse and do you hear them complaining?”

This incident got me thinking about something I dub the Imposter Syndrom. How many times have we trusted people only for us to be disappointed? How many times have we been thown off balance because the people we thought we knew very well turn out to be completely different proving that we didn’t know anything about them at all? We have all been victims of imposters at one time or another.

Here’s the catch, at one time or another, we too have been imposters. Maybe we still have the imposter syndrom. We are different things to different people, we live double lives. Because of that, we lose ourselves. We are not sure of who we are and what we stand for. One day, the different worlds we live in will collide and the effects will be disastrous. It’s time for us to maintain a consistent identity. Even in the most difficult of circumstances, be you. 🙂