The most important work we can do, individually and globally, is the healing of traumas so that we don’t pass them down to future generations. This blog is a working tool to contribute to this good work.

*Age 8 – Letters – “Troubles With Linda”

Letter 10-13-1959 from mother to grandmother:

“Linda oh, darn her, her teacher say [sic] she’s a nuisance – talks out loud in class, disturbs other children – same old story. She’s O.K. at Nursery and finally really takes care of her clothes. She’s emotionally immature – her school work is O.K. [Linda note: There was no option for me other than to play the part in her “fairy tale.” ]

Cindy – heavens. I didn’t know what to expect. Oh Mom for 1st time I heard what I’d always dreamed of hearing.

Her teacher is teaching for 9th year but still isn’t 30 years old. She’s wonderful. I really like her. She’s been at Ft. Yukon for 2 years and comes from back East. She’s taking 2 correspondence courses and Alaska History at nite in Anch. I know all this because it was 12:30 and class was over so I went across street to her trailer and she was working on her courses!

She says “Oh, Cynthia’s Mother – oh, if only all my students were a joy to me like Cynthia is.”

I asked if she whispers and talks in class and she said NEVER. “She’s a top pupil – mature enough and capable for 2nd grade work now – eager and oh, so good.”

Oh, mother, I’m so proud!

I think Linda will try to do as good as Cindy – Linda should set the example for Cindy and instead its vice versa!

Mrs. Wooten said Sharon was terrible while I was gone (she reminds me of Linda the way she acts so bad in front of people) – she’s so good with me. I spanked her hard.

[Linda note: Of course mother would not understand that acting out is often the sign of a distressed child. I know for myself, that my inability to “behave perfectly” in school had a lot to do with the dysregulation of my brain from her chronic abuse of me. My social brain did not form correctly. Of course her expectations were usually unrealistic.

I cannot speak for little Sharon, except to say who would have DARED to misbehave in front of the Beheader?

Chronic stress and distress in the family causes a state of exhaustion in the being of the children. Stress hormones being released into the growing brain is causing havoc.]

Golly, I’ll have white hair soon.

Linda goes to Brownies at Mrs. Hahns and all nice girls go – she likes it.

John goes to cub scouts and is working to be a ‘bear’. I took Jeff so he wouldn’t feel bad and never a “thanks”

— oh, people”

Letter 3-1-1960 from mother to grandmother:

“… had promised kids to go in town to walk around as Fur Rendezvous – Bill won’t even take time to go to movie but each has allowance and could spend it (Linda lost her purse and all her $ saved for camp – 3.50!) Why she brought it to town I don’t know! I felt too sick but we went and Monday I was ill.”