Silent Heart
Sad, as it maybe, I had to break my OWN heart,
Too many nights, I sat there all torn apart
A dream girl,
Sitting under its own corrupted auspices sky
You the poet, in disguise
Telling white lies about, your love for me
Saying I'm a boon from the sky....
A match, a queen, your muse, your everything
I'm no-good, I admit this once more,
Your advice, I forever adorn
It's time I follow the crying crows, and praise what is left
Afraid to listen my rhymes weren't cutting it,
I release it all!
Your smiles, words, and worn out shoulders
I walked away
Silently--
I acted on
Without a word, in a fetal stage I awake
Tonight you carry a tune for others
A story of a man who stole my soul of sins
A poet, I long forever more
Always, you will own the only sound that still beats inside
To live alone, in silence, asleep in my own world
I had to let go,
-Of him, whose name I whisper in darkness
The only thing that remains, are the echoes of pouring rain
Too many reasons, writer's block, took full moon
You are a poet, from another lifetime,
Down in Mandalay, I can no longer ask you to stay
Reading everything about my life, yet you can't answer
Alliterating poems, greeting every dark shadow, normally yours
Many nights I waited, long for the moment of my OWN return
Instead,
I dusted myself off like yesterday's verse, yesterdays dirt
Cobweb, remain on my page
My pen now sits like a twig
No motion, since the day I decided I am not worthy of the wait
You the poet, who walks my way
I pressured less of me every day
Like Aspen, a forever winter cold!
In your eyes, you wonder why,
I trace the white smoke standing in your place?
To savor your words, once more
It's too soon to breathe again.
I hope you understand,
How can I continue to love, when I don't even love myself?
By:PD

Captain Hook, you shine your Swastika
with the schizophrenic shadows
that followed you to the dimly-lit places
where you attempt to be a Fuhrer,
Herr Doktor und the Gestapo
all wrapped into one --
a one-trick-pony with three phony faces.
The shadows hiss into your ear,
"He is Peter. He is also Peter. She too, is Peter.
They are all Peter!"
Just as the foolish invoke the Devil with repetition,
I will grant your wish, by being Peter The Pan;
your Precious obsession.
I am clad in skeleton leaves
and the flowing sap of Skull-Cap trees.
Wendy is an inverted double-u:
M stands for the Murderously silent swagger
of Neverland's Cloak and Dagger.
Stalker-Troll, you are emboldened
behind the illusory safety of microchips
and a screen that brightly glows.
Put your false bravado where your hook clacks the keys,
because I play for keeps,
yet know enough to tip the chimney-sweeps.
And the Lost Boys are in tow.
The system lost sight of us
after we aced our exams on William Golding --
yes, Piggy, boys will always....be....boys.
The Lost Boys are Canis Lupus:
Peter and his Wolves
howling at their pearled Goddess.
Nibs, Slightly, Curly, and The Twins
are tracking your scent to under the bridge
where you dine and slumber with Gluttony's swine.
Ignorance, you invoked Pan's gift-bearing countenance
with your fattened, unsmiling jowls,
so here I come clad in skeleton leaves
and the flowing sap of Skull-Cap trees.
My shadow slinks over there,
but I am hiding over here,
patiently waiting to release you
from the sickness whispering in your ear.
*This is a fictional stab at some Poésie-Noir
for the sake of sentimentality and your entertainment.
Please, enjoy, have a slice.
February 19th, 2014
+/-

You painted your choices with my blood on them
Your walk to freedom, your life and your ways
I stumble on, a runaway from nowhere
Denying life to drown ugly truths
You sold me to despair, lonely years in hell
As you turned away and gave me a name
“Liar”, is that me? Is that your reality?
A cold cover to harsh plays on a five-year old
Tutored hard into their perversities
I limped through life, and your friends
Running to you when I could look back
I tripped over trust and lost it forever.
Cry for me momma when I finally give up
Those tears from you might soften old blows
I’ll know then you are not the mother you seem
And I’ll make excuses for every one of them…

I stare at my ceiling,
I start to wonder, why am I not healing?
Then it dawns on me,
The nightmare clip starts to roll.
I shake and shiver and wince at every little thing.
I'm scared to death,
What does this all mean?
I start to cry,
I feel as if I might die.
Then I grab my blade,
The tears come quicker.
My breath starts to quicken,
My grip on the blade makes my knuckles turn white.
In the mirror is where I see that my ivory skin is now blotchy and red.
I tell myself, "This may be the last time, if you finally cut deep enough."
So I try my best not to make a sound
As I sit up in bed and hold my wrist out in front of me.
I count to three,
One,
I put the blade to my wrist.
Two,
I start to add pressure.
Three,
I yank the blade across my skin,
It pierces and then I start to bleed.
I suddenly want it to stop,
But there's no going back now.
I wonder why it came to this,
I know nobody cares about me,
I know nobody is going to forget me.
Quietly I say, "I'm sorry."
But nobody is there,
No one will ever be.
I start to fade out of this world,
My addiction would finally be gone,
And so would I.
I was lost,
Lost and angry.
Suddenly, it was gone,
I woke up screaming.
The pain was oh-so real.

For I am death, the personification of pure evil,
The grand godfather, of legions of unnumbered generations.
Behold thy disciples, baptized beneath my crimson waters,
Of blood.
Then reanimated as the living undead, in mine own image,
These are my forsaken children of the Night.
Kissed by the angel of death, I'm resurrections insurrection,
Spawned in hell a creature devoid of heart or soul, yet do I
Exist, biting at the exposed throat of humanity, leaving it
Drained completely dry.
Does not the white lily turn ember red, within this the
Valley of damnation.
My throne is a black coffin gilded in golden refinement,
Residing beneath the wooden lid, the beast sleeps,
Waiting to be embraced by the darkness of night.
Slowly, emerging from mine cryptic mausoleum,
I'm famished for the taste of the living essence
Of mankind.
A gentlemen reaper of the fallen, deeply do these
Fangs penetrate into the soft flesh of humanity,
Tis a dark blessing's supernatural gift, have I been
So given, to take life then to restore it.
Raw beasts of instinct, clinging to the ethereal
Moon, that hangs above illuminating this,
Our unholy abyss.
Welcome to a shadow nation of the unseen,
Whose roots extend backwards, to an older country’s
Unconsecrated soil, called Transylvania.
On mine legacies crest, a red dragon with talons
Extended reaches out, grappling for powers control.
For I am Dracula, born of royal blood in life,
But in death I am a king, let these castle walls
Bleed on forever, and the hounds of hell,
Sing outside my rod iron gates.
But beware mortal flesh if you so enter,
For I will enjoy every trespasser,
Whom dares to venture within my
Sacred territory, with a fiendish smile
Upon my hungering face.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

Hiding alone in the shadows
guarded, trusting no one
silently watching, waiting
Is life worth living?
Can anyone save him?
His vision clouded, blurred
The sunless skies have him confused
Rainfall begins
a drenching and soaking rain
pours down
flooding the autumn bonfires
Which blazed in once upon a time
with ardent passion
in the dense forest
of happily ever afters

An almost stillness came about
as she strode into my door,
like breath itself refused to move,
fearful of touching her mysterious beauty
But her obsidian eyes betrayed her.
Sharp and gleaming,
with a silver sheen
she looked at me,
and I knew…
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Molten lava spilled forth from her mouth, melting our clocks—
eighteen hundred nightmares compressed in two hours.
Long hand moving forward, as the short hand moved backward
How can memories persist in such an acrid life?
She spoke of a beast in the guise of a man,
one who ravaged innocence with the flick of a click
A coward that collected milk teeth for hardened bones
of other horny beasts with no spine
That throaty tenderness when she spoke
sprinkled crystal seeds of frustration in me
She says he loathed him, denied she loved him
but her obsidian eyes betrayed her
There she was, a bud he plucked from the nuns’ garden
He grafted then he pruned her,
spreading her pollen, wafting her scent
yet folding her petals to himself
Caterpillars feeding upon her leaves,
she lets them devour her,
yet once they are wrapped in their cocoons to sleep,
she stabs them with her thorns.
Tears then slid down from her midnight lace eyes
and it was all I could do to catch them
She said she was weary of curtailing butterflies,
of tearing their wings before they can even fly
I had to ask, how many… how many winged gems?
She lifted her sleeves, and showed me her scars
One ugly mark for each innocent child plunged deep,
my heart getting slashed at least three hundred a beat.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
A certain stillness came about
as I strode into her door,
like fear itself refused to move,
letting breath touch her mysterious beauty for the last time....
Her obsidian eyes had betrayed her.
Sharp and gleaming,
with a silver sheen
I looked at the knife beside her.
Maroon-mapped sheets, a stunted womb.
Strains of Bon Iver’s “Flume”
flit past the sighing air like a butterfly,
and I knew…
08112014

Is it possible that an angel and a demon could fall in love?
And, remain soul mates for all eternity?
Yes, and I will tell you how it happened.
Maybe, it was a miracle that they met
or maybe it was just meant to be.
That an angel fell out of heaven and a demon escaped from hell
on the very same day.
They saw no one, but each other.
Yet, neither had ever seen such a creature.
The angel was beautiful and kind.
This angel had fallen from heaven
a place of light and life, and of hope and peace.
The demon was imperfect and shy.
This demon had escaped from hell
a place of darkness and death, and of despair and pain.
When they met, their eyes met.
And without a spoken word.
The angel saw only tenderness and hurt in this lost demon.
The demon saw only compassion and love in this lost angel.
It did not matter to them if one had wings, and the other had horns.
Yet, they saw themselves within each other.
Even though they were from two different worlds.
They embraced each other.
Though, they knew their love was forbidden by others like themselves.
So, they decided to remain here on earth.
Where their bond could not be broken.
The heart of the angel was no longer filled with loneliness and longing.
The heart of the demon was no longer filled with torment and sorrow.
Love is what they both were searching for.
And it was found on that very same day.
A forbidden love, everlasting for all eternity.

Modest woman moderate woman
Your inner beauty strikes me
Like the tongue of noble eloquence
More than gold even refined gold
Or our purged fulgent silver.
Black woman proud woman
Your pride is not haughty
But a humble pride of eaglets;
Your black eyes are so glittering
As the eyes of our dark rivers
Filled with messages of peace
That banish the broody turmoil
From those panting hearts
Of your foreigned offsprings.
Gentle mother diligent mother
Your kindness kindles the fires
Of my heart –
Your dexterity dresses
The table of our ageless history
And the thought of your being
– Oh kind mother! –
Makes the most delicious menu
For my heart.
I remember your naked feet
Fast and fair as a pigeon’s limbs
Treading the invisible paths
Almost covered by shrubs
Small shrubs misted by the prime mist.
I remember the wood from the wood
The water from the water
And manifold items from jungle alleys
Borne by your delicate hands
And upon your soft black-haired head.
I remember the constant match
To markets and to farms
And your bright face smeared with
The ash dust
Making you more beautiful
Than any woman whose feet
Ever touched the naked earth.
I remember those burdens
Upon your cheerful kin-souls
And babies strapped to your backs
Babes full of unspoken words
To unborn others in patient wombs
Waiting in an endless turn –
Indeed, mother is dove!
A black dove and a dark huntress
A hunter’s gift from the maker?
Mother is like a weaver-bird
Building a big foot-like nest
Filled with corn and warmth
A bundle of eagle-flight
Mother is dove
And the hunter calls her
The clan’s eternal dove.
Oh, mother loving woman
Gentle as our black horizon
To you we humbly come
From these far and lonely lands
Hoping to grace our love and beauty
Before that jealous grave
Makes her temporary feast.

When nature takes a turn for the worst
grumbling rumbles shakes
great balls of fire falling
in her tears black snowfalls
Burning smell of sulphur
rolling down the mountains molten
they salute death rivers of flames
the chariots of Hell's fire
Crying infants wailing out
embraced in their mothers arms
held together with fathers
They roared to the Gods for help
falling silver ashes remains
Imagining God had forsaken them
as the skies disappeared from their eyes
falling into the darkening death vision
Their universe plunged into darkness
Victims they felt death falling upon them
A deadly feeling they are the children
cursed by the damned volcano
No where to run
No where to hide
They stop and the black ash swallows them
like a carpet of night forever gone
but always remembered in hearts
the fall of a great city of living history
truly will live forever in the archives of time
I would be the Celtic gladiator

Marquees bright, and neon lights, where crowds line up for movie night
We're holding hands, we're in 'The Strand', red velvet carpets guide us in
Popcorn smokes, .. drinking cokes,... cracking jokes with Bing and Hope
Lamour's along, in her sarong,... With luscious lips, and cigarettes,
She fills ashtrays with smoking tips, and tosses guys like poker chips
'Movietone' intrudes with news, which puts us in somber mood
Third-Reich goosesteps march again, ... an evil presence in the wind...
Cary Grant , (a news reporter), loves his girl, and his typewriter
"His Girl Friday", plot is witty, sometimes crazy. But Cary loves this ditzy lady....
William Powell and Mryna Loy..., Asta barks, and finds a toy, ...a ploy? a clue?,....
...an earring gold. The mystery is clearly solved.-- A crimson sun, is rising cold!
Movietone in black and white,... graphic scenes, where soldiers die
Another night, suspense on chart. 'Correspondent' , Joel McCrea.
Saves Lorraine, and claims the Day. BUY WAR BONDs !! They'll pave the way
Bogart, Bergman bring to light, a valiant flght , within their grasp
Airline ticket, in her hand, they must part, and do what's right, no questions asked
----
It's movie night, but you aren't here, a troopship took you far from here
Allied troops are moving tanks. I wait for you..God give me strength
I'm in the Strand, within the dark, there's no one here to hold my hand
I'm all alone...........I heard the news....................You left it all in Anzio
_____________________________________
For Contest Chopped III Sponsored by Craig Cornish
11/23/14

In the name of blood, for it is the source of life itself,
Plasma's crimson essence of liquid infusion, to the undead's
Pulsating heart.
Intravenously feeding cravings passion, through the carotid
Artery at the throat of humanity, thou'st not love, suffer
The pleasure indulge the pain, the out come shall be the same,
To be embraced by the black ebony arch angel of death,
Release thy darker side, let the instinctual behavior of the beast,
Know freedoms unshackling at last.
Become one of his sacred disciples, a creature of his dark dimension,
A kindred being, unto the legion of the night.
In the moon's elliptical light, shadows thus move from
Left to right, shifting as transparent figures, phantoms of
Illusions, taking winged flight, soaring on the currents
Of air mingling with their ancestral brethren, the vampire bat.
Run does not the lone wolf, along the side path next to man,
As we do so walk amongst them, yet never attempting to belong.
Oh are we not the a shunned, the accursed, by a God known
For his forgiveness, to love all living things under
Heaven, but for us this mightiest of lords, turns
His gaze away, not acknowledging our existence.
Our we not his lost sheep, missing from his flock, why
Does not this Sheppard seek this black lamb’s wool,
Is it too coarse for weaving's wheel, as it spins thus
And is it not said that he created all life within his image.
Nay I pray this vamperic prayer, why has he abandon
Us, the darker of his creations.
Behold the unascended, begging to enter beyond the gates
Of light, children of the lost are we, seeking a father blind
To his responsibility.
Harvesting, by the basic instincts given unto us,
Taking only what we need to survive, for this he has turned
Against us, and thus taking the light of day with him.
So my father of damnation's hell, has offered salvation's
Darker domain as a sheltering harbor of comfort, I will not
Abstain his patronage.
For I am the ashunned, living by the moonlight's haunting glow,
Yet yearning to see one last horizons sunset, but the Holy Father,
Hears not my humble vamperic prayer.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

Our dark founding father, of American literature,
A sinister beacon of darkness, lighting the way
Into the darkened abyss of mankind’s soul.
Within the galleria of madness, he is the
Grandmaster of the black ink, and it's
Written words of terror.
In thus the shadow realm, does his spirit
Still roam, on the cutting edge of fear,
A fine thin line, is drawn between reality,
And fictions illusionary world.
Life's a shunned, abandonment’s creation,
The lord's misbegotten son, embraced
The night's cloak, in it's power
His only salvation unto history's
Remembrance, is found a truth's
Justice and notability's respect.
Loves passionate compliant servant,
Dashed against the rocks of life itself,
Broken and damaged, he rose above
The waves of poverty, and the under
Current of tragedies broken
Heart.
Some may say he wrote from the after
Effects that laid, at the bottom
Of the bottle.
Or afterfeeds drug endued comma, dulling
The emotional nerves concept between
Right and wrong, the social exceptionable
Norm.
But we care not what others wish to believe,
For we honor him, those of us the dark poets,
As the father whom lead the way, between
Light and dark.
Dearest Edger Allen Poe, the legend, the man,
A spiritual dark representative, with pens quailed
Ink at his command.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

Anger flies with swift wings
As tedious pleas for more time reverberate through his mind
He is the servant of Time- yet takes the blame
When her clawed hand unwinds the clock
He, the sovereign of the dark, the one and only truth!
Is at the front of the onslaught of screams
He moves soundlessly, a shadow in the world
Tormented whispers scattering around him
Fear spreading wildfires' shrill promise
Mercy, a withering carcass in a crude burial
He became Hope's last regret
When he became the prince of darkness,
Forgoing all he once was, and all he could have been
When he sailed away from home, his love for Time burned
He had loved her, caressing her supple frame
Faithfully staying by her side,
And Time managed to wrap her cruel talons
Around his frozen heart
Dwindling him down to nothing more, than abject self-loathing
And she trapped him within her bondage, for eternity
Now he wanders, over and over again in his servitude
A trapped guardian of the dark
The fog horn groaned its complaint of “too.late”
Under darkened sea that once birthed horizon
And Hark! a maelstrom of black ink
Behold its terrific evil and terror!
A swirling whirlpool announcing you-have-been-fooled
And the cries of fright forever ruled
Scream in delight—“He suffers our fate…in pain we celebrate!”
He no longer looked along the swirls in terror
But was now part of its ferocious cycle
Tears mixing with the agonizing laughter
Amidst salty moans and tepid sweat
Soon… exhausted by the chaos… he sank into a most foggy pit
Ashamed, naked, barren of all past wit
A cowardly frame, shivering in unknown terrain
Inside a place where Time is gone….
But always looming in the brain….
As the errant fogs lift,
The grizzled trees’ feet curl in sensuous fervor of the cold
He envies e’en the trees, with heartless relish of their misty exhalations
Under shuttery breath he no longer truly breathes, … he sighs…
Might I never reach the heights of even the mel-lowed fog?
Shall I burn upon the dead leaves, rising only to fall?
From that day forward,
He wandered blindly
Both loving and loathing pulsing tempos of silence
“I’m still in love…” He whispers softly. “Oh how I am in love…”
The dark that once befriended him almost smiles now…
…then why do I feel so alone?
The wind blows in almost an unnerving jeer
A cool wisp enunciating Time’s uncouth rejection
For she loved no one, yet all
Loving with a cruel wish to watch the other fall
How many has she taken, he would never know
For in shadow comes confusion and woe
—and the voices he hears do not sound of his kind
But who am I? What am I?
A slave in Time’s forever grind…
8/30/12
A very special collaboration with Rebecca Larkin

The hideous and the humble
Blood peppers falling snow
As world hurtles to the tipping point
Life chokes on ignited air
Wrenching love from hungry mouths
Stars fall without sound
Some weep helpless, day through night
Ever wondering how
Never knowing why ...

Do come, my love, for I insist!
Within the darkest crevices of time, we fight, we cry, I die
As vision gives us knowledge, we descend farther into the grime
Curiouser and curiouser, we fall in dark crevices of time
Molded by imagination’s ink, the tentacles stretch outward
Singed from top to bottom, see the glorious coals sparkle
Yes, even before their completion into diamonds never comparable,
It is the very time in between the transformation that enchants the very soul
For in this time, I see the very worst of you,
How it shines without shame, aching to be tempered,
Crushing to prevail over its creators,
The tentacles squirming in hollow defense,
Ink spreading in the dark blue waters of deepest sorrow and agony
How your beak ever pecks upon its prey,
Dashingly exquisite, its sharpness—petulant in its purpose
And I say to you, as you destroy—come, for I shall not back away
When the weapons you hold fall upon my budding flesh
Growing despite the damages you have made
Come, my love, come!
See how my wounds have me, exalt me, trust me…
Into a reality I deeply fall, forcing you upon your knees
For how I know, through your destructing ways,
That together I will always make us be
Come, my love, for I die,
Heavy in the ecstasy of grief,
See how the fairy trees dance upon woes and lift hearts like plucked flowers
How demons with tempting eyes move as squealing moths crawl toward our fires
Wishing the burn of the coals, yet never touching such change
How the light floods through and through, to every dark corner and fissure
Licking the bonding surfaces with perfumed oils crackling
The black tentacles scatter outwards, forming a wall around the growing blaze
My eyes close—from those very eyes you came
Descending to ascend, my love you crave
Trusting the time I have tamed in last feat,
You rise into the everlasting restoration of our name

Seconds,
My life seems to work anti-clockwise
With every tick I seem to get less wise
By the minute counter-clock-wise
As I split-seconds closer to my demise
Look deep in to these eyes
There is no I to make this a life
So let me die
And here I lie
Clip off these wings you gave me to fly
I have no reason to visit the skies
I'm now too cold to be your sun
Still here I lie
I just hate it when you smile
It seems to kill all that poetry in your cry
Now say goodbye so you can drown your pillows with tasteful life
Because here and there I lied
Auctioned pieces of your heart for pounds of flesh I lost taste for after a couple of bites
I was greedy and they were needy- that defined exploitation
See now I believe it would take more than one crucifixion to cleanse my sins
So don't forgive me
I now belong to the Darkness
And your love is not welcome here

She stands at the edge of the precipice,
looking down towards her future.
The last tears that she will ever cry,
falling from her eyes,
then falling into oblivion.
She watches them drop
as they disappear forever.
Yet, she laughs in the face of death.
Would it really matter if she took the leap?
She has been forgotten by tomorrow.
The wind blowing at her back,
pushes her to the edge.
Almost agreeing with her final decision,
and encouraging her to jump.
A thousand thoughts and memories
racing through her mind.
Her first day of school.
Her tenth birthday party.
The lonely, awkward days of her teenage years.
The day she discovered poetry.
The moment she first saw him.
The day she thought that she was worth something.
The day when all of that became a lie.
Every memory
that never made the pages of a history book.
She has been forgotten by tomorrow.
She exists to no one but herself.
In the blink of an eye, she decides her fate.
Her feet leave the ground,
and yet, she did not fall.
Out of nowhere he appeared,
and carefully grabbed her hand.
Pulling her back to reality,
saving her from the brink of disaster.
He held her, as her tears stained his jacket.
Old tears of sadness,
mixed with new tears of happiness.
She was remembered by yesterday.
Before she was forgotten by tomorrow.

I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
Let it sink in
I don't know the answer
I don't know who you are
I don't know myself
I don't know how to get there
I don't know her
I don't know you that well
I don't know the next step
I don't know the answer
Or maybe I do
What if I am pretending
What if not knowing is my way of controlling you
Not having to take responsibility
What if I just want to see what you know
What if I am practicing to become a politician
Or maybe it's true
I don't know
I don't know who you are
I would like to
Really I would
What if we spent more time together
I think that would help
What if you opened up a bit more
What if I listened more
That's not always easy
I'm still trying to figure out myself
That's right
I don't know myself
There are times I think I do
When I think I have figured me out
What if I'm deluding myself
What if I can't handle the truth
What if I need some time alone, to figure it out
What if I don't know, how to get there from here
I could ask for directions
Then what kind of man would I be
What if it would be okay, to question myself
To be able to say
I don't know
I don't have the answers
What if like you, I'm just trying to figure it out
What if, I know myself better than I think
What if it's my way, of protecting myself
When I was young
A girl said "I don't know you that well"
Still she wanted to be with me
Not because she wanted to know me better
It was a hunger we both felt
I don't know her anymore
I didn't know her then
What if I had said no
Had not gone down that road to losing myself
What if I had waited
Waited, till I knew myself
Just a little better
I don't know
And yes sometimes I do
What if "I don't know" is the excuse I used
To do the things
I wanted to do
What if by saying, "I don't know the next step"
I wasn't responsible
I didn't have to take the blame
I could have waited
But I didn't want to
I don't know
I don't know
But
What if
I did
What if I do
I don't know
But
What if
What if it's all nothing but a game
I don't know
Still round and round I go
What if
I stopped
I don't know
I just don't know!

Lightly the rain falls upon the lamp lit streets, the shabbily dressed figure
Walks with an air of uncertainty down the cobbled stone streets, leaning,
On his rickety cane, the elderly gentleman huddles beneath his umbrella Of refuge.
Shadows of the tenement brownstones line the edge of this rough necked
Part of town, here is the sheltering halls of the forgotten do dwell, the poorer
Venue that slum lords build their fortune’s foundation’s upon.
The gentlemen approaches his own dwellings dormancy with hesitations
Beating heart throbbing within his small fragile bent frame, for he knows
Tonight shall be his last night on this ethereal plane of existence.
For one last moments belief reflection he remains completely still, just to
To feel the autumn breeze against his bare flesh, to hear the rain drops hitting
Against the window panes, and to bid his final farewell to humanity.
Taking out his keys with his wrinkled twisted hands, he unlocks the doors
To his apartment, turning around to look outwards the gentlemen sighs, it has
Been a hard life, but I’m resolved to meet the next adventure, then he shuts
And locks the tenement’s door.
Weary from his days traveling the elderly gentlemen, climbs his steps upwards,
Towards his little room in the back area of his apartments, then he sits at his office
Desk for the last and final time, now to complete my journeys final entry, he thought
To himself this writer of the super natural’s acclaim.
Dipping his quilted golden pen into his ink well, the master writes one last line,
The end, or is this just the beginning?
Clumping over, clasping upon his desk the elder gentlemen’s heart lies stilled
As if at perfection’s final rest, his golden pen now runs crimson, bleeding downwards
Across the aged parchment paper, dripping onto the old wooden floor boards below.
The office door blows open a tall figure thus so enters, dressed in a raggedy robe of black,
Thread borne and full of tares and wholes, the creature approaches the dead gentleman,
As if in a screeching howl, the Grim Reapers touches him, ripping his spectral spirit
Free from the fleshes boney shell.
I’ve come for you old man, resist me not for your sins are heavy, and I’ve no time for
The ranting or ravening’s last pleas for salvations from one such as yourself, I have no
Last wishes qualms my friend, take me at your leisure, for I’ve grown weary of this life,
And it’s lonely emptiness.
Then the room grows cold, the ethereal disturbance ends as quickly as it had begun,
Leaving only the shell sitting at the old wooden desk, what happens when the writers
Golden pen runs crimson, bleeding downwards across the aged parchment paper,
Dripping onto the old wooden floor boards below?
The world of humanity thus so weeps for him, for he is the grand master of darkness’s
Written word, the skilled craftsman’s whom reveals what lies beyond the darker realms
Ebony gates, by his darker words of wonderment.
Farewell Mr. Edgar Allen Poe, we shall miss you always, you whom welcomed death
So easily, but the world of men is left empty without thee, as thy golden pen thus so
Now runs crimson and lies stilled forever.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN
SCATCH A CHARACTER CONTEST
10-19-2014

It is the magic held within the darkness, the whispering of the night winds,
Echoing through haunted graveyards, cast are thus ancient spells, illuminated
Beneath the harvest full moon, in this eerie landscape the underworld is
Released, and the undead are free to walk amongst the living, mingling on
This sacred holiday of mysticism, and it is so called, Halloween.
In the ethereal shadows figures move with shades dark eloquence,
As ghostly phantoms enchant the souls of the innocent, passions
Pleasures soothes the hearts of sadness, for tonight the very air itself
Is magical, offering a moments release for the spiritually condemned,
Until the last stroking bong of midnight, is heard off in the distance.
Sorcery's wicked witchy women, fly by sources unseen power of the
Supernatural, cackling with laughter's wild sounding of the jackal, do
They weave their intricate incantation's, to capture their victim's of hearts desire.
Blooming on the mountain side, the wolf bain does blossom, and hidden
Beneath its evergreen leaves, is the star gazer dressed within wolves
Furry garments, howling love sick, unto his ill fated mate, she so answers
With screams reply, and the pack adds another member, and now
These forbidden lovers run together, beside the path of humanities kindred.
Mischievous tricksters are they; poltergeists playing trick or treats pranks,
Vaporous creatures whom thoroughly enjoy frightening humanity unto
Their inner most core.
But heed my warning dear friend; call no priest, for blessing sake for
These demons of mists, shall reek, havocs vengeance upon thee,
Instead leave them well enough alone.
A twisted fellow is Mr. Jack-O-Lateran, appearing body less, with his head
Impaled upon fencing’s spike, what a Gringrichy grimace does he so make,
As a candles light aglow shines from within, his mounted handled top hat,
Exposing the freakish smile on his orange pumpkin face.
The vamperic ring master, on this night of horrors terror, welcomes the unwary
Traveler, to take part in this celebration extravaganza, come one and come all.
Let us so partake in these evenings’ festivities, El Carnival,
As the children of the night, serenade mankind in the back ground,
Beyond our earthy realm.
As the mornings first rays of light, brush their finger tips across the
Horizon's canvas, the darkness is banished once again, creeping
Beneath the under belly of the sun, as all evil creatures melt, and fading
Within the shades hollows, until next years celebration takes place once
More, on this darkest of holidays, called Halloween.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

Darkness of night,
introduce me to what lurks
underneath your enchanting moonbeams.
I know that I should stay away,
yet, I am drawn to these silent things
that could easily end me.
I am not afraid of the supernatural.
I am spellbound, enraptured, mystified
by these psychotic creature's requiem dance,
that captures my soul
as it's own possession.
Darkness of night,
take me into your underworld,
where the arms of roaming specters
can totally envelope me,
like a densely tangled spider-web,
with no intention to ever let go.
Allow them to take me away,
to a deep place where, peacefully,
my dying soul can finally rest.
Darkness of night,
tell the devil only this....
he can have all of me,
to punish in any befitting manner.
I have already been through torture,
known pain, lived with loneliness,
and seen hell on earth.
The devil may care to try,
but he cannot hurt me any more.
Darkness of night,
say goodbye for me.
Shout high up to the heavens
and tell the sun it needs to shine
no longer on me.
Dark Poetry Contest

In the cradled of life's dark garden,
It dwells amongst the murky waters
Primeval,
Behold the creature from the black lagoon.
Nay what is this creation, neither fish or
Reptile.
Yet a blending of both, a high bread's mixture,
Intelligent, and cunning, the last of his species,
To survive.
Brought unwisely did men, bring beauties
Forbidden fruit, unto this lost oasis of Eden.
For alone sentinel awaits to partake in such
A luscious morsel.
So does it not say in biblical text, go forth
And multiply, by a driven basic instinct he
Cautiously watches from the thicket brush.
What a graceful motion moves within the
Jungles domain,
She swims idle caught unaware, the bride
To be herself, charms him with every stroke
Across this lake placid.
With Chameleon like stealth, the groom appears,
Taking his prize to their cavey honeymoon retreat.
So tenderly he greets his mate, from shocks
Dreamy like state she awakes, and recoils in repulsion.
No love's scorn, and tragedies broken heart,
Can do more damage than rejections expulsion.
Bullets may have cut the flesh to the bone,
But was it not beauty, which killed the beast,
And the last sight he saw, was his love in
Another's arms.
So ends natures final verse in this evolutionary
Experiment,
The creature from the black lagoon now lies
Dead, upon this tragic stage of life.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

I, a Red Skin dog, as some may delight to call me,
I have heard the tales of horror, from my dark skinned foes.
I have heard the tales of terror, from others who became my friends.
And I have walked with a dark skinned woman of their tribe.
We walked in the beauty of her courage, together. Tearless.
Tearless we both were as she spoke, for tears, only gods could cry for her.
I am a Red Skin dog.
And yet we walked together and we talked – together, fearless,
I and this swaying ebony sapling, sprung from the roots of my foes tribe.
We talked of the pitiless reality of that life she left behind, of that time
That she has left, far, far behind, like a useless scar
That has toughened over. And made her stronger.
I learned from this daughter of my foes
That true courage is never fearless, but always stronger. Victorious,
Stronger she was by far, to this Red Skin dog
Than the thousand sons who died, in her honor. So they say. Ridiculous,
But I have heard the balance of their sins.
And for all the tales I have heard from those angry young men, and their vengeful fathers
Her horror was a thousand times more sinister. A thousand times more callous.
Horror took up residence in her home but never in her heart.
But for others, I cannot speak.
“…splinters and bursting fragments…in my mind
Ai! Tearing! Memory of tearing flesh, swallowing tears and mucus, blood and bile
…bruising and ripping garments…off my body
…filthy, familiar hands tearing at my dress…
…my legs split and broken like a wild pig slaughter, my screams smashed from my lips,
With the butt of a rifle, just used to kill a Red Skin dog…
Aieee! Clean this floor mama, mop up this spew!
It cannot be mine!
This child is not mine!
It is not mine! It is the devils own creation born in hell fire!
Born in my death!
Aieee! I am dead, I cannot be alive.
I am dead and the Red Skin dogs have eaten my corpse.
Those spirits in their wingless chariot flew over the land and sea, to rescue me?
Rescue me from that black devil who said he was like Jesus to me.
I thought you were my uncle-brother…
Who else could have found us here?
Hidden away from the Red Skins and their Wingless Angels.
Only you my uncle-brother
Only you could have found us
Only you could have killed us.
And now the progeny of your evil deed suckles at my breasts
As I lie dead in the home of those Red Skin dogs you fought.”

Smooth as ebony silk, black aquatic waves the melting
Essence of liquid evil, stirring this lake placid of our
Eternal nightmares, deadened space in the fathoms
Deep, beneath the dreaming realm for which we sleep.
Translucent tears, left dripping in our unconscious mind,
Trick, trickling, encroaching, drowning us within the
Fear factor, heaving, and tugging at the reality of
Humanities thin realism.
Raw is this blackened well, of emotional plunging,
A pit bottomless, in suctions raw force of power.
Thy soul trying to cling against the porcelain sides,
Yet sliced by the roughed edge of illusions delirium.
Sheer glasses elliptical memorization, hypnotizing
The lucid mind, smacking hands blister at the panes,
Begging for this bad dream to end.
But your voices scream remain nothing except
Echoes refrains, that are lost amongst the complete
Darkness surrounding thee, in this murky abysses
Tidal surge.
Wake up, wake up, this is not real or is it,
The torn spiritualist grasps at faiths buoy, but
Instead sinks farther below the currents swift
Under currents, then light slits through the dark,
As lightening slashes at the blackest night, and
The dreamer shivers beneath his covers warmth.
Laying within his twisted sheets of sweat,
He wonders if any of it was real at all!
But whom can tell what lucks under the black
Waters of our nightmares, dare you to go swimming,
Into the rivers of the unconscious to find out, and survive.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

Lover
Yes the love you evoke
The heart you wove
Spirit you broke
Shadow am I
Go to the Witch of Endor
In Sheol
my soul
yes my love
darkness unfolds
In Sheol
one weepeth dust
wind blows cold
Feeling is lost
struggle to breathe
seas are tossed
Was I dead my lover?
yes I believe so
the shroud my cover
You arose from death
shined love on me
I am resurrected
was blind now I see...

Darkness Wraps My Pain
I was born to this flesh
A slayer in pain
No regret, no remorse
Gold and pleasure my gain
I never wanted love
Nor did I want joy
I found death a trip
Where I once was open
Now I hide in darkness
A slayer of souls
Seeker of agony on all
Ageless shadows grace
My tomb within hell's
Ripping dungeons that
Eat the screams of
Torn bodies and cut
Out hearts scattered on
The blood soaked floors
I was born a slayer
A slayer that delights
In agony wrapped in anguish
his, hers , yours
give me a choice I
chose all.....
Robert Lindley
05, 23 1980
note: This is from long ago.
A very dark time in my life.
Must have been wasted because
no ryhme.. lol

Masked Men
Look in the mirror
Look in the mirror
What do you see?
Masked men staring back at me
What do you do when you look in the mirror?
Only to despise what you see
The pain you caused the everlasting memories
Do you see what you've done?
Can you live with what you caused?
Go now down your distant path
Your unworthy happiness will never last
These are things the Masked Men Cause
Who’s to say your right or wrong?
Misguided emotions lead you down this path
Masked Men mistakes will surly last
Go now the time has come
No more chances the Masked Men are done
Turn away and feel the pain
The lonely walk to enter slumber
The Masked Men Smile with pleasures unknown
Another one down
A broken spirit lost
Close your eyes and take his hand
Let the Masked Men take you away
By: Tim Lundmark

Tragedy is never a sentiment for Time
For it is a phenomenon she merely sees
She pours forth abundance for all that behold her
Even for those of us that scold her
And for naught she was cursed from the beginning
There she is—interminable Time at the fullest!
And we all envy her ever-ringing constancy
She rules over our hearts
Keeping stress in our spirits
Not once does she feel sorry for us
Nor is she indifferent of our failures
She begs not for gratefulness
And accepts who she is with joy!
How ample we would be if we
Like she—were free of trepidation
If only we be like her waters—clear and visible from top to bottom
Filled with untainted approval
What fools we must seem to such a pure jewel as Time
But ah, she is both heartless and kind
And though we hate her peculiar aura
Oh how hard it is do tear her from our minds!
How stressfully beautiful Time is!
Like a wink of venerated bliss
She smiles and smiles
And our ironical faces feel like grime
Still she laughs in mirth
While the world becomes a ball of putrid hatred
Wanting more and more of her
And positively hating her
We that cannot see her began to hate
For we are as visible and low as can be
And we acknowledge her merely to insult her
Though she takes no pang to the chest
For the only gifts we give in return for herself are pangs
That she simply returns to each sender
Hidden is our pride
But ever placed
Ever unhidden
Is our inscrutable mortality
And this humiliation of our unchangeable fates
Makes us want to humiliate the more fortunate
Thus we regard her only as a concept
As a fraction of a belief—a bellowing ideal
For of course Time cannot in our honey-glazed eyes
Think, eat, drink or feel
We use her—yes! Even abuse her
Not once will she complain
For her gift is everlastingness

I stare at all the stars in the sky
Like everlasting snowflakes
No two are alike
I wonder what god was thinking
Maybe they are just his
Guidance and comfort
Seeping through
I look all the trees
Wonder how many can there be
Think about insects
Their number and variety is bigger
Then my ability to pronounce
This must be gods
Overactive imagination
Seeping through
I watch my fellow humans
And all they are capable of
Masters of both hate and love
The material and physical
And how they love to create
I have come to the conclusion
That this is all an allusion
To god having O.C.D.
Probably has multiple personalities
And the devil
Is just his paranoid schizophrenia
Seeping through

Falling, falling, falling
through the pitch black air.
My hand reaching out
for something that isn’t even there.
Now running, running, running
from the dark that seems to take
everything I love but leave everything I hate.
And slowly, slowly, slowly
I slowly start to die
because, to be honest, I have nothing left inside.
As I fall on my knees
the hollow ‘thud’ fills the air
But everyone around
Just stands there and stares
At the grand execution
of the outcast they call “The Witch”
As the hooded man
comes towards me with a switch
With the old, familiar sting
a tear surfaces in my eye
and as it slowly does continue
I slowly start to cry.
Then the figure pulls out his sword
and as, towards my head, he brings it down
I find myself crying
with His arms wrapped around
my violently quaking body
and then I silently did cry
“Why? What’s the point of it all? Oh, why?”
but then, very calmly, He does start to say
“Hey. Just look here. It’s gonna be okay.
You’ll never be alone as long as I’m right here.”
And then ‘it’ happened
The only thing I fear
I found myself alone, kneeling, clutching where he was
And I quickly grabbed the swinging sword
My eyes were closed because
I wanted them to feel
the pain that burned inside.
My head lifted up
to the unforgiving sky
and before the people could react
one of them screamed and then did shatter
and inside my brain
nothing really mattered.
The world around me broke
like the ballet mirrors
that I used to dance in front of
when I was young and had no fear.
Then I found myself
laying in my bed, alone
and inside I knew
that the fault was my own.

With a deafening thunder
and blazing lightning,
Amidst a swirling clouds
of dark ominous smoke,
He appeared suddenly
Smack in front of me -
A most hideous being
who appeared neither
human nor a beast.
With a swift sleight of hand,
Before I could even cry out:
"Stop it. Oh God, please stop"
He plucked my heart out
and held it in his hairy filthy hand.
Oh, why he has to take it out?
My only possession, my only wealth,
The only thing that beat against
my frail, long worn-out chest,
Assuring its constant company
in this lonely journey of my life.
But heedless of my pleadings,
He tossed my heart
into the gutter
with a gut-wrenching laugh!
I asked this foul fiend:
Who art thou?
Why did thou taketh my heart away?
With a guttural voice he spoke thus:
I am the devil! Lord of the Hell,
I am the impetus that steers
the course of affairs in this world;
With me on your side,
You'll get the most out of a strife.
With Adam, the first man,
I came hither and residing since.
An ardent companion of those
who coveteth glory in life"
He bent down,
And with his flaming eyes
peered into mine,
Spitting foul breath into my face, he sneered:
But this heart!
This heart is a hindrance,
A barrier, the core of love and humility,
Where you feel the joys and woes of life.
Nah, there's no need for it.
Not in this world,
Where the mind reigns supreme;
Not in this age,
Where vices prevail unrestrained -
The age of decadence, KALIYUGA!
He half turned to go,
But then he paused,
Turned back and looked at me.
Never have I seen
such a heavenly sight,
Now transformed into an angel,
He extended gracefully
his milky-white delicate hand
And whispered softly
on the breath of the breeze:
Give me thy soul,
And I will give thee the world!

As quiet blackness deepened
I lay awake my heart in check,
The cool night wind blew
And welcome silence grew…
_______
Unanticipated music exploded
Roused me from bed rest,
I tiptoed to its source:
Dark sounds from downstairs,
Nearer, higher, and louder
Till it reached the hallway.
He grasped my hand,
Whirled it to turn me twice,
Held me close, went on trotting steps
Slow, quick, quick; slow, quick, quick;
Slow, slow, quick, quick...
He never gets tired, he liked the dance.
He led; I followed - his greatest joy;
In perfect timing to his bidding,
I swayed wherever he flung me,
His steps were full of variation –
He liked it that way;
While I only had one reaction –
Receive his urgings.
Perfect dance he'd always say because
It is with such ease when partner is open
That controlled movement is played.
Ungraceful dance I never liked,
But all this time it kept me alive:
His music and diverse steps I sought
And to it I humbly swayed.
Tonight I let him led again,
Just like the other days and nights.
The darkness of the night was strained,
It was only the curtains that were swaying,
To the night breeze with grace,
Stark of light peeped out from the room,
My hands and feet went frozen like ice,
I heard a different tune within, sad, weary,
But slowly roused with excitement
And anger underneath... Heated me up
Ablaze, my eyes red-stained -
He held me closer to him, and I -
Pulled myself too tight to him
He was pleased I saw it in his sated eyes
As I meekly submitted… for the last time.
We did slow, quick, quick steps for a two
Or more and then he let me go; I trotted
Far away from him then back to him
Without his behest, and out of rhythm
His steps were outside our dance floor…
Down the stairs...In open position he lay there,
In his face I saw his dance - the macabre
dance - I never liked at all. His eyes dazed –
He had his final dance with me after all.
_____
The night was cold, yet I felt warm, and the music gone,
The curtains stopped swaying at the night winds’ prodding.
8/11/14

With love I look at you
And see your eyes transform
To gaze into depths
Which carry a secret storm
A ring as dark as night
Around a golden sky
With speckles of dark stars
That bring my lips a sigh
They hold the world's wonders
A box of sins and hurt
A glimmer of light
That glows just like hope
With love you look at me
And I see into your eyes
Your soul bare and naked
From me you do not hide
Their gentle with a sadness
They shine as you laugh
They hold both parts equal
Experience of life and death
You stay hidden to the world
But you open up to me
And in your eyes my Darling
I see everything there is to see
With soft lashes they appear
Angelic in their own way
I watch as they close
And your anger drifts away
Unclothed I see your soul
In the doorway of your eyes
I could stare into them forever
Lost without a sense of time

Vainly I stand before you
Waiting for an utterance
Any word of understanding
But these are days of famine
The honeysuckle flow of verse,
And kindness has abandoned
No words can repair this ruin
Too late, too late, to wait
My memory of you will fade
Yours of me will never be
And thus is another chapter
Of broken dreams and lost love

The (Pret)end(er)
His drug laced hands were trembling
Holding the cold steel blade upon my throat
Convoluted thoughts of my demise filled my mind
On this dark and dreary moonless night
Will this be my only chance
to get the hell out of my misery
Or will this little peon of a man
lose his nerve and chicken out
"Go ahead and slit my throat,
don't hesitate just kill me dead"
As I thought, the juiced up junkie
got scared and dropped his guard
My hands weren't shaking, my blood ran cold
I didn't care about my lost and lonely life
He should have killed me, taken me out
I grabbed the blade and butchered the bastard
Now he's gone to meet his maker
Most likely sent to the depths of hell
His waste of a life is now wasted
No longer a meandering menace to mankind
Dark Poetry Contest
08/10/2014

Standing still
Waiting in the twilight
Hunger-driven
Need-enveloped
Primal aggression empowering me
Keep the scent fresh
within my being
The masculine
Testosterone-drugged
and weak
I see all
Waiting
Crouched and
Stalking game
living in the coiled energy
of my quivering muscles
Embedded in the shadows
Waiting
I watch transfixed
by the tantric apparition of ur lips
Moving in disarming temptation
Mouthing defiance
and coarse with the echo
of your sweet thick breath
heavy
male
Waiting
For unlawful carnal knowledge
Conjured within my hands and heart
and heat
I am stalking u
Carefully positioned to attack
The shadows surround my form
& dance at my back
Waiting
Deep in the dark
My muscles coiled
waiting
To spring
To rip and claw and bite
To taste bitterness
To end this
Waiting
I'm not me before the piece
I'm not me before I feed
On u, on the world at my feet
Waiting
Watching in subservient language
I
Eat
This
Heart
I
Eat
This
Part
Waiting for the kill
is sweet
sexual anticipation
Of which
I
Am addicted

Venus’s light grew ever brighter as discovery marked its territory
On new faces—old ones brought to the light of sudden love-falls
I grew wary of the feelings surpassing my entire being
Wavelengths of caution holding their hands up in dominance
“Do not pass as to succumb to the charm of your desires,
Yet pause in the epiphanies that blind you”
This voice had the authority over the stars and planets,
Over the birds and beasts, and could be heard by all rebellious men
Its anger was subtly piercing, with no trace of mortal malice
Erupting for the greater good of my confused soul,
Trapped in the sentiments that have swayed me into some false conviction
“Stay here and forget the voice,” says another oh so softly,
“Take wing into heavens none have traveled before
Do not pause at the discretion of your reasoning—
Instead ride upon the back of revolution’s stride
Taste the inner cravings that have molded you together
Crunch on the sustenance of those around you
Eat it all—for the morsels are both tasty and satisfying
Be fattened in the comfort that everyone around you…FALLS”…
And then my guard was cut clean off…
By the most gorgeous face I have ever set eyes upon
I had seen this face, many a time…
Yet now it pierced me sharper than ever before
I longed to taste the lips that spoke to me
I faltered in the sound of the laughter escaping the mouth
The heart of this being was so fixated in its own reality
And the despair of my desire grew uncomfortably under boulders of Never-
Will-I-Attain
Oh voice, loud as thunderous fire…
Why can I not desire what I will never have?
Will I crumble to dust by this new feeling,
Or shall I forget it all and assemble my thoughts upon new and greater
heights?
“Oh beautiful soul, take a look at your heart of gold,
Remember your time is ever so short—and though all fall short,
These desires inside you will stretch your time into success
All bottled up in alerted misery,
Why burden yourself in cold sobriety?
Embark upon the passions like the waves of the sea—
Give that heart that you so long for what it deserves…
Give it the truth—your truth
And if you fall, you fall…”
I silenced the thought with terrible thrashing tears
Wanting to listen, yet too stiff to absorb it all
I begged the voice to strengthen me,
And all I could hear was the assurance of my desires
Yet the echo of the Almighty was clearer than the sorrows I possess even
now:
“Do not pass as to succumb to the charm of your desires,
Yet pause in the epiphanies that blind you”

Made my choice
I always wear
the blessed Bennedict cross
scared of the Devil himself
for my soul protection
I saw the faces twisted in agony
mouths open screaming arms out
pleading with love to be saved
inside a moving mass of pain in Hell
I walked in the burning darkness
suffering pains a zombie for my sins
a blind existence inside one shell
I had no one other than family
to call upon as friends
Seeing suffering tortured souls
what they done to me
Trusted to easily
used and stole from in my charity
Born under the wolf moon
always watching in the shadows
a mountain climber by birthright
Howling into a cold loneliness one fight
with the heavens inside at war
Brought to my knees in the all forgiving face
of God cured of cancer one miracle
I know destiny again
coming out from arising sun
I bow humble and meek
I will be stronger for living
knowing where to place my trust
Smiling always with friends
because I see now love
It is you who makes
each and every single world go around
I walk now towards your light
forgiving my past
Ready to face this big bad world again
only now I am stronger seeing hope
always praying for you love
No redemption in Hell
it just keeps getting worse

Torment of lingering whispers from the ones we love stray in our minds, Each tear that breaks away our flesh cracks as it streams down our face, Their warm hug that once held us tightly in the cold and lonely days faded into the wind, You stand on the bridge looking down as the ice water rushes downstream, Shattering winds shred at our skin with horrid things on our mind of their touch from the lips you once knew so well, Your eyes close as you turn away from the water...hands embraced together as you hold you heart, One last tear slipping away as you plummet fast toward the ice, The splash engulfs you, The darkness beneath calling forth your body to the bottom as you drown in its abyss of ravaging wrath, So much pain we all live in we can only try to live with it and move on.

Forever, our love lingers in the air all around -
The smell of fresh paint lingers in my nose, in the air.
Crisp sheets lay smooth untouched with hospital corners.
I dreamt I held you in our bed.
A king-sized bed is too big for one.
Wedding gifts are strewn across our dining room table.
I dreamt we ate there together as man and wife -
candlelit dinners and meals with laughing children.
Dreams that will never come true.
(I dread the nights, long hours alone pass slowly.)
A family room quietly sits alone without a family.
(I wrestle sleep in fear of dreams darker than my loss.)
A yard waits outside for a garden that will never be planted.
(I forget the day, the month, even the year
you left without warning,)
Nothing is as it seems; only my flowing tears are real tonight.
(but oh, how in the darkness, I remember too well the moment,
down to the second of my silent screams -)
Forever love lingers in the air all around –
(twisted thoughts, face contorted)
A new home, a new marriage, but one of us is only here in spirit.
(in pain like no other pain I had ever felt
while holding what once was you.)
Only one returned from our honeymoon…
In light of day, I turn to stone.
I wish it was me who died that dark night.
(Then, night comes haunting me like a ghost)
The doctors said nothing could be done.
(too weighted with evil to rise.)
A silent death stole you from sleep and me
while I slept next to you.
(Behind closed lids, I am the torero impaled by satan’s horns)
Nothing could be done…a beginning and an end.
(searching for God in the final breath)
Forever love lingers in the air all around –
(Again, screams cannot escape from my choking lungs.)
Now our dream home is for sale. The dream is gone.
(My heart breaks like shattered glass)
I cannot bring myself to sleep in our bed
so I make up the couch tonight….again.
(the shards racing – tearing through my veins.)
My heart calls out for you; my arms reach out for you.
(Red eyed and weary I wait for a hollow sun to harden my heart again.)
Life changes in a moment.
(I would rather be numb than suffer through tortures of night.)
I taste your lips on mine.
I smell you, see you, hear your voice whispering my name.
Forever love lingers in the air all around. –
(I dread the nights, long hours alone pass slowly.)
Your touch lingers tonight...
with the smell of fresh paint.
By Rhonda Johnson-Saunders, 2/16/15
For Craig's Intermingle Contest
2 poems revised and intermingled are Fresh Paint (6/29/2012) and Shackled In the Dark (1/18/15)

(Free Verse)
The oceans shores with their rocky paths,through which,
I can can still see a shining ray of light.
Far away sinking into splendor, too great for a heart
Was to hold.
The heart has its own memory, like the mind, to keep afloat
Its faith to fight it for you through, alone,
The giver's loving thought, and fearless heart who fights
Again the foe.
Pleasures come but not permanently stay, even this moment
Now shall pass away,
In that all the rest may be cast away, and that all our mortal
Flesh, must go back to where it came from, to dust and clay.
Dorian Petersen Potter
aka ladydp2000
aka ladylove
copyright@2000
December,09,2014

Sitting here inside myself I suffer from the air around me as it steals my breath, Wonder if anyone notices this pain tormenting me so...I'm vulnerable around him and he can't even see it, this thing deep within, It burns so bad I can't stop it, My melody has left my soul as the inspiration abandons me with the sound of his footsteps leaving. Gone from my range of hearing, my knees buckle beneath me as I think of those who replace me, Those who are better off with him than I, My stars dull in the sky as my world falls apart, There is no light to break up this dark around me..No more looking at him to help spread my wings, They simply tremble an fall to the earth, His beauty no longer holds me up...this distance kills my heart every beat it takes, the fading of the colors engulf me I no longer see my dream.

The fog sets in as the gloom of pain and anger creep over the hill side reaching out to us, Engulfing our hearts and minds with hate towards the ones that cause us so much grief, Wishing we could step in and reflect the damage done to those we care so dear about, Unable to replace the horrid memories we sooth them as best we can, Digging deep within their souls trying to sew back each string bit by bit....Torment in our lives cause misery beyond belief, All we ask for is pure joy and happiness, No such thing is bestowed upon anyone even those who deserve it, Stab the pain givers in their hearts with mental abuse of anguish in which they've given...make them suffer for the hurt they leave in their wake, Close your eyes...visions of how to ravage anothers body with your own torture deep within your mind, Actions wish to unleash such thoughts but alas we are stuck standing in front of the mirror as we bleed from the tear duct of our eyes, Hold strong be there for them...it's all we really can do anymore.

Silent in the darkness of each breath..inhaling this air we feed to the lungs within the beast of our inner torment, Ever cautious ever alert our presence creeps across the meadow as the mist protrudes from around us.. If only this demon could be sworn off, killed and defeated, left and feeling nothing to suffer in its own mindlessness, Yet we stand as it rips, tears and grows within us.. Changing our souls for everything it was once worth to something it turns into pure hate in a nightmare of a world, If we can't be ourselves...Then who can we truly be, We walk a fine line as the edge slips away from us we stumble to find ourselves within fighting off this beast...nothing we can do....nothing anyone can do...less we kill off the demon with the blade of our pure selves ripping its heart out and feeding it to our gorge of an abyss, If we can't be ourselves..then why try to be anything at all....haha..you will never be anything of any worth till you fend off the one thing that binds you to your own hate..your anger merely feeds it giving it strength as it grows within you, Stay strong and make the demon bleed...there's no rest for the wicked things that linger in your lives.

the night after Halloween
walking home from a lifeless downtown
I see a poorly made skeleton
hung by a noose
blowing in the wind
tied to a tree branch
older than I am
as leaves dance around my feet
until I kick them away
and silently wonder
"How often do people lie to themselves
to move ahead with their lives?"
There are no more hills to climb
No more childhood mountains
to conquer

With shadows in the dark,
Facing atrocities of the cold,
Yet drenched in the sweat,
I walk down the street
Am bound to follow what others passed by,
Crime it is as if else I try,
Tears follow the path of my cheek,
And it’s the only way my eyes speak,
Lips of mine when turn dry.
I smile I really try to,
To be happy as if I was made to,
I speak of something I don’t know
But there’s what my heart knows,
That’s what my eyes ponder,
And that’s what untold but true,
Yes I know,
Yes I do,
I am missing me in me,
Yes I know,
Yes I do,
I am missing being me……….

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died,
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping,
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it,
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain,
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best,
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia

One thing that I know all about, without any doubt
The meaning of “Oppression of The Soul.”
I once shattered all my dreams, with ill-gotten schemes
Along with every single goal
Emptiness is a real dark thing
As it eats its way through your soul
I found the bottom of the pit, all I can say of it
It truly was a very empty hole
I guess every story has a meaning
Just as every game has a price
If you look closely at me, you’ll be able to see
A lifetime of pain in my advice
Oppression is a real dark word
Regardless of how the word is used
If you’re in the shadow of it, the bottom the pit
You know what it means to be abused
For years I walked in the shadows
I had nothing but hatred for the Son
I just couldn’t see, why it had to be
All the things in my life that had been done
If you were to look into my eyes
And read all the stories they have to tell
All you would be able to see, is pain and misery
A shadow that was in a living hell
I know all about oppression
For it rolls upon the shores of hate
I once looked in the mirror to see, a ghost living in me
Just a skeleton walking through his fate
I also know all about redemption
Behind every shadow there rest some form of light
With in the breath of a prayer, I learned how to care
Thus changing the course of my plight
Every story has a meaning
There is a way to right any wrong
Grasp to the light, and then hold on tight
As you search for the meaning of your song
My song once was heavy metal
I truly loved to bang my head
An empty soul, with a bottomless hole
A never-ending hunger to be fed
Now my song is a ballad
A story that is full of hope and love
I learned how to pray, and give it away
Accepting grace from the Lord above
Oppression crosses our paths everyday
It is everywhere to see
You know what’s right, learn to stand and fight
You will have learned to be all that you can be
Written for the "Oppression of the Soul Contest)

The sweetest sounds of burning trees
A gentle stroking in the breeze
The calm has lasted past the storm
Cloudy visions, Satan’s roar
Too many sights have passed my way
A time found only in the haze
The softest screams are running bare
My aching bones creak as I stare
You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark
The battle’s started at the end
No one is coming to repent
The sinners grab their wine from prey
No judgment calling here to stay
The sport is reckless to be told
The one is laughing at his souls
It falters nowhere to be sure
The power grows forevermore
Like a spirit in the wind
I have no say in where you’ve been
But cross the line to come to me
And pay the price for ecstasy
You walk a distance towards me
The fall’s eternal, can’t you see?
I’m a memory in your heart
I whisper to you in the dark.

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind
For it is only an offense given to me by myself
In the mouths of others far innocent than I
I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks
For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake
I am always inadequate in this brain
I try to shine like the advice of grace given
But confidence rarely rears its head my way
There’s a sort of shade blocking its way
A shade that darkens everyday
That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong
That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled
I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold
I hate myself truly this night
And no one but myself will give me the right
The very right to degrade my every being
Because you are not seeing what I am seeing
There is no point
My lines run cold
Can I be so bold as to say
I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt
All feelings enter in
As my truth blurs and checks out
Your words pierce me so deep
I cannot describe the pain I feel
God it hurts so bad
It can’t be real
Much like the love I have come to embrace
The very love that links to your face
Tears don’t give it justice
It can’t be real
Much like the love I will never face

Cold and dark, the eyes of the depths
glaring at the stars above.
Few dare descend the steps
which reach down to oblivion’s cove.
Heavy, the desire for truth,
like the chains dragging my body further down
unto fate unknown.
Beyond recompense, lies the ruin
sunken to forbidden ground,
now home only to the strangest of creations
and catacomb to the drowned slaves of history.
Will all memories be as this one day?
Ghosts that haunt the corpses of humanity’s ambition?
Black are the bells that once chimed to announce omen.
Buried are the thoughts that walked my mind.
Broken are the tables where ideas once feasted.
Bound are the hopes, eaten by preying sharks of doubt.
Weighing down, the garments choke the breath of life.
There, where insanity was sane, beneath facade’s streams
lies truth, in the sea of forgotten dreams.

Within your mind you silly fool
Your anger, a storm hidden inside of you
Things forbidden now begin to brew
Tormented by things you should say or do,
Whispers and lies they spread like wild fire
Wants and needs and your inner desire
Fearful of life and human touch of hand
Strength and weakness becomes demand.
You live in the world inside of you
One day you will pay you silly fool
For life is not a game for the cool
It counts for everything you do.
Found this in a stack of papers and not sure what I was watching that made me write this one.

The sun says goodbye
as it dips slowly below the horizon,
and dusk settles in for the night.
Heaven's mood ring
changes constantly,
from pink to orange
then to a faded yellow.
My mood lightening, the sky darkening.
Shades of lavender to dark blue,
then to a faded black.
As twilight takes over the sky,
my favorite time approaches
when my eyes can fill with wonder,
as one by one,
the stars turn on their lights
and twinkle just to say hello.
They've all seen my face before.
Then the moon, my old friend,
rises to meet me right on time.
Heaven's mood ring
fades to black,
only until the dawn
when it will change again.
The sky lightening, my mood darkening.
March, 22nd, 2014
Nette Onclaud's contest - "A Night Sky"

A confession to the
bartender
The one with the drink in
her hand
The one who looks just
like my bottle...
A glass would do
Or make it two
So i can pour out my
heart to you...
So i can make my
bitterness come
through...
You remind me of my
lady
The only difference is
your are tenderness
You never took my heart
the way she did
you never played me the
way she did....
She was everything to
me
That's why i took her to
where i would be
Somewhere dark where
no eyes can see
Somewhere i could meet
her again....
Somewhere she won't
hurt me again.....
My secrets i give to to
you my bartender......
Secrets of a large dark
heart....
CONTEST; confessions to
a bartender
by; Natalie :) The Rogue
Rhymer

Window-watching, the silver clenched in his palm like a charm,
his loneliness sifting snowflake patterns
through ashy, argent winter light.
In the shadow-shuttered green shingled house
the lucent beauty of lovely bones, keeping him company.
The eyes of the first one, serene and soul-open,
were mirrors in which he admired his reflection.
He softly stroked her to sleep - body a pulsing pearl,
her last gasp to grasp him, a quick breath in and out;
that candle flame wane, spasms quietening to calm.
Antidote to emptiness - another fortuitous find ensnared:
her vivacity a kaleidoscope mix of light; psychedelic-bright
bubbles blown to illumine the dark cave of his mind
where bestial images crouched.
Love-hate declarations imprinted, bitten deep on her cheek;
hands around the slim-stemmed lily of her throat.
He wept tortured tears over two; soul-screams in unison,
sweet suffocation in the laburnum-gold fronds of their hair -
he only wanted to hold them heart-close, gulping essence like oxygen.
Their heaped lovely bones - a rick of sticks under the crackling corn.
Awake through the painful bruise of night,
carving grand plans, serrated blade in surgeon-steady hand.
Peering through warped shutters into endless empty light,
his many masks impenetrable, soul-screens intact.
Poised under icicle precipice; his and their fates intertwined.

My love
we celebrate your birth
on this night of Sanhaim
when the worlds are whisper-thin
and your magic sings its sweetest song.
Your love draws stars from the sky
lures spirits from the tombs
snow falls from the summer sky
a love so sacred and magical.
Let us meet
surrounded by forest
as the wind
whispers its secret to the trees
we seek the sacred creek
leading to the river that caresses the earth
where flowers rise in rapture to the sun.
This day I am yours
you are mine
we are inseparable in death
by any power or pain
for it is such true love
no death awaits us.
Come with me my love
come back to the one
feel my spirit and take flight
let us see all of creation
let us seek favor from the divine.
God and goddess we shall become
gods of true and powerful devotion
let us be graced
by the moon goddess
by the dragon of the stars
allowing us to burn hot with passion.
Let us draw from the power of the earth
alive and solid
beneath our feet
fertile valley of existence
all our wants and needs
will be satisfied.
Embrace this love
blessed be
your feet
your knees
your womb
your breasts
your lips
blessed be your soul.
My sweet love scented by jasmine
I seek you on the silver slant of moonlight
beautiful moon goddess
your magic is all enthralling
I succumb to your witches cry
I come to your lair softly lit
your Wiccan pattern on the floor to guide me
save me from the river of flames
with the manifestation of your desires
for in you my lover
I am charmed...

Well there you are
I have slithered into the wrong home tonight it seems
I sniffed out the repugnant ward and I don’t like what I see
You were magnificent in the face of all beholding you
But your conceit is a trap that even I, the snake, have fallen into
You mask yourself with humility
You compliment me to gain
Begging for the summer rain
Begging for the words that would settle your brain
You got it
But instead it rained on me
Showering me with dangling promises
As typical as can be
Empty
These words so execrably wasted on you
As if for a moment I could even dare CRAVE a poem for you
I do not hate you
I cannot love you
At times I do not know what to feel
Why do you do this?
Put on a show and hope someone will notice?
Do you want a nice pat on the back?
I am armless; I am all but muscle and scales
I am a dead carcass and yet you continue to compliment
The beauty of my revulsion
I hold it to my heart
This trap you set
I helped you set it right from the start
And you have forced upon me the mere THOUGHT of you
Taking away from my bitter lines
What empty necessity I have turned out to be
Some kind of trophy coiled around your feet
Walking all over me
I’ve hissed and I’ve hurled insult
And the rain pitter-pattered my distain
You rested knowing I would remain
You needed reassurance
You always needed GAIN
Well I’ll tell you
This serpent is drained
And oh how I hiss
I will not change into that typical mistress
That settles your conscience with a kiss
You will not have me
I will never kiss those lips
For you are as fake as can be
And not even a snake like me
Will help you in the deceiving
As everyone watches your show
The only one truly believing
Is YOU
Don’t hesitate out the door
I’ll swallow you whole

it stormed again in her heart last night
wild slashing rain
driving hard against the walls
battering the beat
and riding the heat
shattering wailing zephyrs
this tempest bemoans her
it stormed again in her heart last night
hard pulsing thunder
and raw rhythms that quake
and she alone to feel the pain
stark and dark Kentucky rain
tearing past her guard
to lay blasted and bleeding
it stormed again in her heart last night
where daffodils should bloom
where the sun light is cast aside
and tulips weaken and fold
cherries lose their hold
lightening has shadowed eyes
willow boughs must always weep
it stormed again in her heart last night
as she alone watched the sun die
fragile hands, and hollow cheeks
torn and worn, the shattered
in the red and blue that mattered
in a dark lake beneath the crying moon
that is where the tears go

How can one express the baffling depths of obscurity?
How can one behold to open the shafts of the mind?
I have never been able to solve the mystery—
Of myself. . .
I wish at times that my life was no more
That I could live as another and finally see things right
But I am always stuck in this darkness
And I cannot see this mind in light
There are beasts. . .demons prowling through the wasteland
Searching for any remaining life
And if they are ever found—
They are doomed and consumed
Fear is their downfall and they never fail to smell it
Their ashes remain, dancing with the imaginary breeze
It is silent here—there are no answers
I wish there were answers. . .
But maybe there was never a reason
No answers. . .
Talons extend and clench around my heart
They will never seek me out—they left me here
It is like they knew…I had no reason—that was the answer
I feel the pulse of my dangling life
Alone in the dark, whimpering like a child
I have scared myself, becoming this dragon-daggered youth
No balm in Gilead!
No eyes to see
All I know will never be free
I don’t need anyone!
You are a disgrace—scum of the waste!
You have everything, you ungrateful little nothing
You are a joke. . .
So swallow it all up like the pushover you are
Stand your lowest and trudge right through
No questions. No answers. Just . You.
Or just lie back down into the mush of disease
It has already infected you to the core
Accept who you are, you ugly pestilence!
I hate you
Who are you to be glorified?
Dream snatcher. . .murderer of all things bright
Saturated in what you call light
I see right through—even as the reflections shatter
All of the dead kept you alive—they all matter…
But alive you are the worst there is
False savior—edited attention whore
I never want to see your face again
See, that’s why I hide. . .
Desperation. . .desperation. . .
I sob and cry kneeling in defeat
For once I am right. . .I am right

I love how your long chestnut hair flows over your gentle shoulders,
And when the sun searches you out for a moment, your hair sparkles…
Because I lit a match and threw it into that rat infested hair ball that you
Waste all your time on. Next up is your head which I’m going to rip…
Don’t listen to him. I’m mesmerized by your deep blue eyes, when they lovingly
Gaze In my direction. I will never make you shed a tear, my dear…
But I’m going to kick you about this filthy house. It looks like all you’ve
Done all day is piss in the wind. And stop your crying; your baggy eyes are…
Ignore him, my love. Your soft, gentle touch upon my face arouses my senses to new Heights. All my cares wash away as your aquiline hand slowly glides along my arm…
What the hell does he know? If you don’t get your boney hand off me, I’m going to break it In half. And the next time I catch you trying to be nice I’m going to throw you out with…
Stop that, Hyde. Sorry, my love, but as I was saying, your body is a masterpiece sculpted out of the finest treasures. I’m in awe of its supple curves, how it flinches to the touch…
Oh, shut up Doc, you’re killing me. And speaking of killing, I feel like pummeling
The living daylights out of your emaciated, piece of good for nothing…
Please be mine baby, before I’m lost forever to…
I’m in charge, so get over here and take it like…
I’m fading, my love. Hurry, say you’ll be mine. Save us.
I’m going to tear you apart. You’re no baby, you’re a…
Save me, before the monster wins…
Too late, Dr., she will be all mine soon…
Just a kiss, my dear. Just a…
‘Slap’, take that b****...
One kiss. Now! -The Dr. and his lover kiss- Thank you, my love. Let that vile
Monster rest in peace, so that we will be left in peace from it for evermore.

FADE TO BLACK
My life it seems has had its share
of shining moments, recalled with
fondness when some achievement
let me stand awhile inside the light.
But when the bulb more faintly burned,
and shadows ruled the day instead.
Then it was that I have seen the rabid horde
rush to steal the fading rays and claim
that it was they who once before had
kindled the amazing spark and
more than once obtained the praise.
And so my trophies gather dust
and tarnish high upon my victory shelf—
wilted blooms of a forget-me-not life,
which no one seems to remember.

Beyond the iron gate, alone
I read your name, through tall weeds, grown
A vigil, where the mossy stones
Cleave to breast of wasted years
I feel you standing here with me
Deep in the dark, where I am drawn
Where whimpering trees, brown grass and weeds
Are dripping in the weepy dawn
There is a web, that pulls me in
That tugs at me with silken thread
A withered garland, black with dread
Calling me to hear the wind
Where dust to dust, of what has been
Is quietude, and vague recall
That falters in the falling leaves
Yet alters what I've always known
I know I loved you long ago
It comes from you, in thin-leafed songs
Two centuries old, and can't be seen
Shadowed by the granite years
Behind the gates where you have lain
Sharing earth with dried up tears
Defying time that lies between
I see your name, through tall weeds, grown
A vigil now, where mossy stones
Bring with them all the wasted years
Between us now, I feel the cold
Defying lucid reasoning

My head is a box of secrets
My nerves are tuned to my dreams
If I could change this sorry world and
were to tell you of my plans
I would speak a universal language
If you heard my message and
came with your own secrets and dreams
I would be invincible
I am the gentle voice of Peace,
the the living symbol of Harmony
Friends resonate with my energy
My head unlocks the mysteries of life from
where the source gushes
I need the power of generosity
I need the art of forgiveness
The old house haunted by false deities all at
once fell down.
I found miracles in the dust, said
to be the hope of things to come
A good and abundant spirit
Ah, for a power to change psychic forces
My lady, the God of Storm and Frenzy is on the move
Mama his occult nature frightens me.
I am nearer to the truth
My poetry is an instument of grave importance
Goddess, I am- but not exulted
The nerves still strain for this sorry world
My wit is a power for change
Sweet mama, I have seen the shadow
I have been generous
I have been forgiving.
But still the world revolves around hatred
Frighten off Wotan !!! the unleasher of dark passions
Until Heaven and Hell collide
let there be no talk of Archetypal fate.
I fear the notion of a collective unconscious
filled with psychotic types withdrawn from reality.
Goodness must overcome - mark my soul

Pentagram house of worshipers
Voices of chants Echoes
Red skins in lust
Boiling in passion
Black in shadows
Naked in bodies
Dirt in pearls
Enchanting
As Sky folded earth
Black and white
Pure and clear
Hippocrates Sigh
Groans and screams
Passions of the devils and gods ….
Daughters of humanity
Invoke upon god and goddess
Demand peaceful life and wipe your misery
Heavenly cloth yet dark phantoms
Hypocrites in religious
People of Righteousness..
Open the door enter grey area
Deceive and filth using norms as their shield
Unveil masks
Call a priest and dance as beast
Congratulation
Again trap
In a circles of cell block
Clown choirs Sing a fantasy music
Title Goodness in disguise
Doubt of what?
Awake and rise
Celebrate
Pure as crystal
Hesitation is a dark energy
For us are unique
Jewels’ of existence Theist or atheist!
22/11/09

people are like stars,
some are younger,
some are older,
some are brighter,
some are darker,
some are bigger,
some are smaller,
but in the end we are all the same.
all together.
shining bright with our personality.
dont care about what other people think.
its their own opinion.
be unique,be you.
you are who you are, and who you are is all their gonna get.
so shine like a star!!!

Forgotten you
As your mind collects the memories of yesterday
Forgotten You
Epiphanies tie into knotty strings of realization
That very moment. . .
You merely exist
Back then. . .those smiles
Those. . .distant laughs
Some you remember by name
Gone now maybe
Like the exhalation of the wind
Others dispersed in the world of arbitrary happening
Like leaves from falling, man-made trees
There is no doubt that they have
Forgotten you
Activate the bomb
Ignite the fuse
And you’re on next year’s history book
Never forgotten
But drained of all remaining good
That smile you gave
That happiness
The warm embrace so long ago
Salt-coated with piles of rubbish
Over last remaining mental spurts of comfort
Evil, evil, evil, evil, EVIL. . .
Always absorbed and remembered
. . .though never forgiven. . .
All good and gracious sentiments
Packed up in a box set nonchalantly in Downstair’s storage
. . .that chair with the broken leg in the corner of the room
That mangled cobweb holding a dangling, lifeless spider
A drowned sailor’s hat drifting through the current of the ocean
The single tear from a soldier’s vigilant, memory-stricken eye
The frustrating thoughts of a mute
The unchanged. . .HATED deformations
Forgotten you. . .
One soul brings to light weary, unthought-of happenings
Wedged deep into what she can only imagine
With not even a hint of understanding
. . .of the pain. . . .of the bewildering distortions
Of the ugly. . .
One soul merely vomits sickly verse after verse
As humanity embraces its downfall
The poet hangs onto her unjustifiable, forgotten. . .
Words

Slicing the instinct
The arcane was torn, curses spit
Teardrop bated as the breath hunts
Wound wide open, the heart cries
The ripple of pain unable to stem
The cimmerian sigh loud and stay
Body falls along with the bridge of hope
Toying life unwillingly to be blamed
The chain of fate convoluted by mistakes
Incised by the foredoom of another story
Shouted a shout inevitable said
Reverses direction and unpredictably impaled
Breath blows the true bitterness
Jaded in each lamentation
Tired of every abnormalities which frequently ensue
Longing for the things which reasonably flows as it should
Life is about to choose
Though destiny had its own script
We have awarded a red carpet, but
Sorry if we still have to walk on the imperfections of life

Angel of Death,
Cloaked in black.
With black scaled wings,
Upon her back.
Angel of Death,
Coming for me.
As soon as I sleep
Then dead I will be.
Taken by the night
It swallows and consumes me.
Now I am the angel
And death becomes me.
2003-2004
7th Grade

I am tired of counting the red dwarf stars in the Milky Way.
I am tired of counting the 7 years of grain in Pharaoh's silos.
I am tired of counting the steps to the sacrificial altar of the Chichén Itzá pyramid.
I am tired of counting the people swallowed by the Antioch earthquakes of 115 & 526.
I am tired of counting the victims of the 1737 & 1839 India cyclones.
I am tired of counting the departed from the Influenza Epidemic of 1918.
I am tired of counting the death toll of the 1931 China floods.
I am tired of counting the total military and civilian casualties of WWI and WWII.
I am tired of counting the number of Jews killed at Auschwitz, Belzec and Majdanek.
I am tired of counting the drowned in the 2004 Indian Ocean Tsunami.
I am tired of counting the biomass of plankton in the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.
I am tired of counting the needles on the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center
I am tired of counting the cracked and dirty windows at Riker's Island prison.
I am tired of counting down the clock until the our Sun becomes a red giant and dies.
God help me! I can't sleep. I can't sleep. I can't sleep...
I'm immortal. I have OCD. I'm so tired of counting sheep.

Sickle moon gray above the waves
The quiet directionless wind
On the earth, and in the sky above
A veil is drawn, cutting into dark spots
Slowly round and round,
Murals are etched into the sand
The statue waits with eyes unblinking
Silent wonder, solitary armless stone
Twisted, counter-pose, forever fixed,
Wonder, what does she see under water?
Rusty bows and sterns, shipwrecks,
Silvery fish fluttering in and out of hulls, a
graveyard outside hallowed ground
Archway, the great doors dark and closed
Murky, wet light pours in vaulted windows
Through water-worn edges of stained glass
Seaweed tendrils curl around an altar
Once, quiet processions marched up the aisle
They are now only filtered ghosts,
Murmuring, wavy impressions of what was
Forever, the tide calls upon the great steeple
And the lonely under-toe,
Pulls a mote in the sand around her,
To protect the bastion in the sea,
Dark, lovely, lost forever to those above

HELP
The CAPTCHA took me by surprise tonight
Letters became ghouls in my mind’s eye
I listed them—
Noted them; words...begging, crying out for me
STAY
CAPTCHA was merely mocked
By millions of viewers on keyboards
I imagined all—
Tears began to fall
LOST
How may I help you, CAPTCHA?
Are you merely what they say?
Is there more—
Tell me, I pray
AAND
You bewilder my senses with your emptiness
The computer became my way to you
But all I could do—
Was imitate
CRYY
I began to imagine someone stuck in CAPTCHA
A place where they harbored the weak
They took what they pleased—
Allowed them to speak
NNOW
Today it was happening and evermore
There was a reason I came to know
And now—
I want to know more
FOLL
I swallowed air and typed in the words
Feeling worthless and absurd
I began to believe—
There was more to this irrational dream
XOW3
The screen went black and then I was sure
I couldn’t doubt it anymore
The CAPTCHA wanted me—
The letters suddenly blurred and unseen
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Let them go
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Full of woe
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Take me now
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Tell me how to
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Set them free
CAPTCHA
CAPTCHA
Knowing is free
Knowing is free
MMEE
For years I have copied your codes
Knowing you are there
Me—it’s me
Crying in the dark pit of despair
AAND
Though empty your words are to me
They are all I hear
All I fear—
In four letters on this electric trap
XXBX
What am I to do?
To follow would weary my soul
To save—
Would take its toll
FREE
What is this foreign word my dear?
Oh, how can you cut and paste it in my mind so clear?
Free—and then?
Close your eyes and count to ten
The victims of the CAPTCHA remain a mystery to us all
Yet still we stare at the codes and merely imitate them
We are zombies staring our lives away
Trapped in CAPTCHA’s claws
Sad, deprived. . .
CAPTURED
I speak your language to stop this cruelty:
THEE 2TRUE TH78 IS9X BEF4 HOUR VERY EYES
Though we choose not to see
We choose not to fight
We choose only to IMITATE
We merely copy and paste
CRYY
CRYY
CRYY
GOOD
BAYE
BAYE
BAYE

This is my last confession; there will be no more.
I am impercipient and slow from last night's sleeping pill,
wincing away from the harshness of day.
Kitchen cold, the room tear-splintered,
sunlight striking a watery rainbow in my eyes,
the air smothering-stale from my hopeless coffee cup crying,
while life outside the window ticks on relentlessly.
Seconds turn into minutes turn into hours...
When you plashed your pearlescence over my pale skin
I never guessed the inner ugliness of those seascape pearls
encircling each ovary, stubbornly adhesive, leaching new life.
The scanner's screen sizzling static, darkening to nightshade depth,
its impersonal probe trailing damp viscosity over my belly;
shockingly sticky as the first time you came over me
but lacking the warmth.
Puppetted by pity you brought me pink carnations,
crushed their bright baby-frail faces into a tacky hospital vase.
I am weighted with a multitude of baby-frail faces.
Indifference cold-eyed me at the hospital: histrionic, hysterical,
a blubbing huddle of neuroses - "Doctor will I conceive again?" -
a collocation of surgical steel and wonder drugs.
Drugs to inflate the ovaries with a Botox bloat.
Drugs to wipe clean the scribbled slate of the mind.
You left me to weep amongst white hospital sheets,
coffin-cold, my hands folded on emptiness,
a paint palette of blood inks seeping from me.
Brushed by the soft wing of silence, what was being concealed?
The products of conception, screened from view?
The unseen dead, faceless and nameless,
trundling on trolleys through sterile corridors
to the eager heat blast of the incinerator - their crematorium.
They said I could try again
but barrenness occupies my bed;
it is a womb-burrower, fattening stealthily on menstrual blood.
The claw of infertility is clamped on my shoulder:
torturous flesh-hooks digging at my skin.
I ache all day from blanched almond ovaries;
fragile finger-fronds stilled to nothingness...
I find myself miraculously in the shopping mall;
my feet have no memory of the pavement that brought me here.
Fruit machines flicker and wince like migraine.
I circle the shop floor, keeping a safe distance.
I am not dangerous. I am not predatory.
I only seek to protect the meek;
to shield them from the vodka bottle,
the beatings, the needle in the arm.
Beneath the strip light's dizzying glare,
tenderly fingering bootees soft as puppies, mittens like kittens,
the meek sweet sleep smell pulling me in.
My purchases earn me a benevolent smile
from pretty Pollyanna at the cash till.
The tapestries of faces at school gate gatherings -
faces daffodil-bright, sunstruck and open with joy;
the happy heaving hordes.
I am not dangerous. I am not predatory.
I only yearn to merge with the scenery of domesticity,
immersing myself in routine and normality.
Noticing individuality,
the way it blossoms in every pram,
hazed by the human differences.
Vertiginous spinning of kaleidoscope and rainbow;
the park a synaesthetic playground:
blood bursts of poppy, fire flames of freesia.
My audible emptiness clattering; a hollow pod rattling
amongst bud bursts of green, fruiting trees, flowers heavy with pollen.
A sickly size eight drifting diaphanously,
the scenery of pregnancy swelling around me.
Encircled by circularity: round bellies, round faces,
roundabouts spinning, globular beach balls and balloons,
blossom spheres shaken from trees shivering to the ground.
Awake again last night in smothering, starless dark,
that tiny bloodied form beating like a trapped butterfly inside my head;
face pressed into a tear-damp pillow,
recalling the bathroom's midnight chill
as I knelt in raw ruby carnage on the floor.
This is my last confession; there will be no more.

He smiled once but the smile got broken
Leaving his mouth in a downward curve
There once was laughter
So very long ago
Now his room is filled with silence
The pieces of him have been rearranged
All of him is there yet no one sees him
A shattered mind
Strangled spirit
Unable to be shocked back
No reset button to push
He wears his white jacket with five foot arms
Sits in his pillowed room
Rocking to an unheard beat
Unable to connect with the outside world
Who is to blame?
Was he too fragile?
A freak of nature?
Somehow deserving of this fate?
We may never know
His voice has been taken away
The spark has left his eyes
His happy ending has been taken away
Crazy
That's what they say
So they lock him away

And we are left here
Like maggots—dirty, parentless…devastated
Always feeding on the gruel…the cruel
Fattening our lives in the moneyless bilk
Shocking like a bee sting, yet soft as silk
We are the forgotten
I am watching the others grow rotten
But I am cleansed and raw with glee
Because…though blinded with slime…I SEE…
I rise to the sound of the agonizing screams
Of rapes, murders, of violent fists…weeping minds
My definition of true finds…
I smile when any possible hope arrives
Fate laughs, knowing I constantly scream inside
I am amused of it all…I can’t stop laughing
As bitter tears began to fall
I HATE ALL OF YOU…
I WANT TO KILL YOU ALL…
But I love that I can take anything
From the nothing we have all been labeled
The sick, the low…the mentally unstable
Watch me roll up in a ball
A naughty tease to death’s lull
I love your silence…
I love your intense fall
And we are more alive than any of you
We are crazed by your belligerence
Aching to be emotionless
SHARE YOUR INDIFFERENCE
SHARE IT…
Give us something to be left with
So the others can die
As Fate veers its head looking in the mirror
Listen to her laughter—do you hear her?
She watches and waits
To find her maggots have grown wings…
Screw your selfish indifference...we fall to fly
We are more alive than any of you
Though quickly we die

I went back into that dark, dark place
Were demons dwell
And
Lives are taken away
But
Through the pain
And
Through the tears
You were there and kept me near.
You saved my life by loving me;
Your silent strength was the key.
Gentle touches and silent words
Let me know that love was the cure.
Depression is my evil curse,
And
When it planted the seed of death
Your love washed it away
And
Gave me the strength
To seek the help I needed to keep it at bay.
I’ve walked that dark path so many times
I’ve done lost track,
But
Things have change
And God’s given me a special tool
To help me through,
I have you and Joshua too,
And
Rooted deeper is the knowledge
Both of you want me to stay a little longer.
So like a drug addict that has lost their way
I start the road back to brighter days,
And
There are not enough words to say
I Love You
In every way
And
May God bless us ever day.

The virgin page is spread before me,
pristine as this prissy white township,
and my own tameness is tedious,
and guts me, like the port slaughtered fish.
I need to puncture the pallor
with black words, tough and dark
as the jet that veins these cliffs.
What courses through my veins
is insipid, light-drained.
Speared by these ink-dark thoughts,
what blackens my nights
like mourning jet?
Last night I dreamt
a whirlwind of wings:
amber-eyed gales of gulls,
ebon storm clouds of bats.
I feel the snare
of my engagement ring
tightening its finger-trap.
I shrink like a nightshade
from the sun's gold goad.
And I have learnt
that what is tombstone-cold
can be cremation-hot:
sultry breaths upon my breasts,
and a sharpness like a needle
piercing the lily of my throat.
By day I am porcelain-pale
with the primness of afternoon teas,
pleasant walks under parasols,
genteel small talk.
By night I am moon-white,
beckoning blackness in -
a harbour light penetrating dark,
luring a ship towards land
to snag in sand arms of the strand.
And a prow stakes moon-bleached beach.
Night lopes through streets.
Moon-howls loop, shadows leap,
wings at windows beat,
and a dusk-light lust grazes my throat.
Enter by moonlight or invite,
impale the pale;
I'm blood-wet with desires,
have needs to feed;
sinking and drinking in sunset red
that has bled and spread
like a staining of ink.
a slightly different take, for 'Be Bram Stoker For A Day' contest

Silently, she lies there listening to sirens off in the distance,
On the bed where they just recently enjoyed each other’s passion.
The neighborhood dogs, barking at the noise in the night, are taken inside by their owners.
Tears streak down her cheeks knowing that never again would she make love to him.
Never again would they kiss and make up;
Never again would they laugh together until it hurt;
Never again would she stare intently into his deep, dark eyes;
Never again would she cuddle with him in the dark of the night;
Never again would he strike her in anger;
Never again would he leave bruises all over her body;
Never again would he overpower her with his brute strength;
Never again would she lie about how she got another black eye.
She loved him too much to find fault with his behavior;
Surely, somehow, she must have deserved the full force of his wrath.
She hated him too much to continue to endure the pitiful look in his eyes
As if asking, why do you allow me to treat you like a whore?
Flashing lights of blue and red reflected off the corners of the bedroom wall.
Neighbors, dressed in bathrobes, pointed the police officers to the window of her room.
The gun which pierced the silence of the night with six rapid, successive blasts
Slipped from her fingers, landing on the floor next to the lifeless body of her man.

Dear Sir:
I realize you’ve been busy, so I’m sending a letter of distress
Postmarked today, addressing my quality of living
Since the last time we told our life stories
Sewed the seams between our broken dreams and
Seen the world through the eyes of the needle
Tiny and volitional
Since our foggy self-destruction,
Misplaced priorities and miscommunication
On every lonely person’s face, I see my own
Reflected in the spaces between our parallel lines
That should be meeting at Infinity
Please send me a post card when you get there
I want to know what Love looks like
I keep
Doin’ and doin’ and doin’ my thang
Stacking up that green and
Piling on the makeup between each scene
Stealing hearts and pulverizing them with each time
I blink
You know…
All those honest ways of making a living
Collapse into bed every night only to close my eyes
And be haunted by dark thoughts of you
Urgently and Daftly my pen
Spills raven-hued rivers of devotion
Onto this piece of paper
Hoping to soak into you
Dear Sir,
To get to the heart of my request
Open the ocean to me
The dark sea of your deceit
Drown me deeply in your lies and suffocate me with your
Transparent desperate pleas
Dear Sir, cure me of this loneliness
Charge me of suicide and let me crash into you
Kamikaze Lovers
I understand the risk
I'll take my chances
Openly armed and ready for the world
In those intense brown eyes
Stopping my breath and caving in
To see the world so clearly again
Awaiting your response to my confessions
Sincerely,
Me

Let's play a game
of Russian Roulette.
I'll go first,
you can pull the trigger.
Look me in the eyes
as the muzzle
nuzzles
the temple of my skull.
Fire.
I'll probably be fine,
more than alright in fact,
as I watch you
watch me
remain alive.
It'll look like you love me.
It'll look like you care.

There is a her shaped hole in this world
A black void
If you look hard enough you can still see the sparkles of the departed
Black diamonds of the afterlife
The entrance left open
In case he needs to follow
It's not in the leaving she said
It's in the living once I'm dead
The cold cold bed Sat in our room
The silence in the telephone
This is what the worst will be
The carrying on without me
It isn't in the leaving she sighs
It's in the knowing I didn't survive
She asked him once to be brave
Carry on forget her name
Give some meaning to his life
Leave behind the cold dead wife
How can you love me she asked
When all I want is to depart
How am I faithfully yours she cried
He just looked at her and sighed
It isn't in the leaving she cried
It's in the living once I've died
Where I'm going has no name
The darkness consumes me again and again
I'll wait for you she said
She promised as in life and death
I warned you along the way she said
I tried to make you see
I never belonged to your world
I was never truly me
I belong to the nether world
I was put here by mistake
I'm waiting for it to draw me back
To take again my place
This is what she's seeing there
He's too used up to even care
Watching his restless nights and days
Keeping the haunting mind at bay
The last vision in his head is his wife hanging above the bed

You are my apocalypse,
in your eyes I first glimpsed the end of the world.
I craved the destruction in your lips.
(I was well aware this was killing me slowly.)
Our love is my suicide,
my manifesto, so to speak.
You named my pain and told me it'll never fade.
You became the only way to numb it.
You're draining me, I know.
Consuming my mind and body with a well-time crooked smile.
I'm beginning to wonder if I mean a thing to you,
or if I'm just the means to your end.
Alone together we gasp for a cure,
thinking we belong simply because we don't.
Forcing together our broken hearts,
bandaging our scars to fake being complete.
You're messed up and I'm messed up
and this world is messed up, too.
So let's pull the trigger and cross the wires,
hands clasped together, we are the end.

Where did the role of soul leave?
Blind in directions, lost in destination
Escaped amid to the extraneous crowds
As if gone shattered like the whisper of dusk
Peace of mind seemed to be fade and mortal
Like a starlight with less of hope
There was no love, no sorrow
Everything placed as ghosts
Will it able to question
If you hold all the answers
Will it able to survive
If you bury all of your sides
Confusion...
Mind occupied....
The uncertainty rule the roost
Thirst caressing for longing
Wondering for the cure, arrested in anxiety

I am not a poet
I am the truth spitter
Don’t call me Christian
Call me disciple of my own religion
I am not a prophet of words
I am the prophecy
I am the words
I am the future
Plant a seed in me
And look at how it grows
Love and pain do go together
Love, however, I am not
I am pain
I’m the sorrow of tomorrow
I’ll corrupt your good morals
Your sacred feelings I will borrow
Step on them and burn them
And then I will return them
I will make you black inside
Smoke and fire go together
Smoke, however I am not
I AM FIRE
I will turn to dust everything you got
I’m the sorrow of tomorrow
And I am coming for you soon

It's breathtaking! So I am often told:
The sparkle in a mother's loving eyes;
The glint of an amorous joy in a coy bride;
The hearthside gleam on a cold winter night;
A glimmer of hope to the lost and forsaken...
But what would I know? I was born blind!

Let us be; we are fine.
Our hearts are broken,
and we do all cry;
we show our emotions in blood and metaphor;
you sit and smile at my sorrow,
then you ask if you can help me.
The smiles are fake, but the words are real!
I throw my sorrow on a thin, piece of paper and call it poetry,
while dotting my I's with tear drops.
We are all poets, some speak it;
others write it,
but we never forget it.
You call me a cry baby,
saying all I do is complain,
and you point out the flaws instead
of encouraging the good to come out and shine;
"Another teen suicide today"-Oh- I wonder why?
No one cares,
till you are packed in a box and put six feet under.
Break my heart when I'm alive and well,
and stich my heart back together with words of praise
when I'm dead and long gone.
Nothing left to show,
but a stone with a name and date that is covered by fog
and forgetful snow.
We are the modern day Romantics,
so break our hearts for if we cry and wonder,
it means our hearts are still beating.
Don't still my hand or his or hers,
for we all have something to share
that's worth hearing,
... someone just has to listen...
.1.29.2014.

How can you look someone in the eyes and tell them it's the end?
How can you possibly do that without shedding tears?
Or even blinking?
Do you not feel it? That pain, that pain that's taking over
Their soul, as you tell them their life is ending?
Or maybe it's just that you have lost your own soul?
In that instant when you found out that the greatest part of yourself
Is about to disappear,
That its light was about to be permanently extinguished.
Can't you feel it? That sorrow that slowly shutters their hearts?
Or the fear that's taking over their minds? it's a furious fire,
Cutting off any glimpse of hope with its smog,
That fear, its suffocating their soul into its last gasp.
Can't you see it? How that laughter ends sharply, in pain?
How it breaks in half every time, never to relapse into its fullness?
How the darkness stealthily takes over those, once life-filled, eyes?
That following calm,
It's the call of darkness,
Smoothly enchanting their soul into submissiveness.
Until all is in deadly silence,
Their bodies still, their souls forever gone into unknown.
Do your tears come then? Do you feel their pain then?
Do you see it? Or do you stay the same?
Unchanged, unemotional, shell shocked,
And forever unbelieving still?

Dreams they're all around me,
it's hard to tell real life.
Monsters like in fairly tales,
my emotion turns to strife.
The sun starts getting closer,
my skin it starts to burn.
I look for somewhere to run
but don't know where to turn.
He makes his way towards me majestic also wise,
it was hard for me to distinguish between what's loving and what's lies.
My heart it starts to flutter,
My body starts to fall-
I try to scream out for help
but I don't know who to call.
Thus the journey's over,
now I'm on the ground.
Tears fall from my eyes-
my heart nowhere to be found.

I don't understand
Why it is
I feel the things I feel
I do the things I do
for you
I don't understand
Why it is
You feel the things you feel
Why
You do the things you do
Wait-
Now, I understand
For you
---By: ~Tawny~
My daughter

Oh DARK artist
What a beautiful picture you create
Not with hues, pigments, and light
But with tone, imagery, and night
The soul an awaiting canvas
Your pen the finest brush
With reckless abandon you work
Is the masterpiece entitled Suffering
Images of sacrifice, torture, and insanity
A downward spiral of regret in the midst
Ah but when did doom ever seem so sweet
So many beautiful extenuating means
Surely they will justify any end
Your tale like sorcery captivates
You carry the title of Ciarraighe
From the dark rain filled lands
The darkness extends to your inner being
Rain now covering the pictures you paint
Pours forth from within
With each toile of tribulation
Resonating beauty resides
Will the beauty outlive the pain
Unfortunately the canvas cannot answer

Of first embrace and broken glass
I cherish that first spark
New light upon our forest' dark.
Do you recall that northern wind?
It came at first so swift
Perhaps our growing light enraged
Poor Hopelessness', her whims denied
Inspired shadows from retreat
Those having once left us in our light.
"There's hope for you!” her battle cries
“Forwards; towards the glowing night
Attack! The lion will not bite
I promise he will turn blind eyes
Go back! I will cover your eyes!”
“Follow storms winds descent
True path through forests dense
Enter hence.
Rip, tear, rent!
From low to high
Head to toes
Even to above
Where dark forest glows
Churn even these shades
Whites and grays
Yellows arrayed,
Where once were dulled
"My children do not stop there!"
She would say,
"You must inscribe them full
Lest unseen hopes, occupy as slivers
As pretending tones, they have been known to hide
Shimmers upon the edge of shades
We must leave them emptied, lost whims, denied
Their ways left as waste to ruins
Despairs do not relent with dooms
Leaving chance to sparks in time
Per chancing kindles from hearts that loom.”
“Descend, my raging opaque!
The dense itself engrave
Teach young love old lessons
That she may now know at such young age
The heart of this forest lessened.”
“Now go' my shadowed tails delight
Slice sharp paths without care
Cause those within their ears too bear
The roaring of fresh leaves…
Torn from their rightful place
Before the given time”
“Dying screams let them endure
Let them feel your shadows
….Purge!”
The cold so swift
We were so sure This was spring
........residues
Your body’s naked form, lovely
Dropping, encircling our flame
Dying breath
Woman’s instinct
Nurturing
Disregarding winds intent
Then came the rains' extinguishing
Saving coals
Your hands were warm
My feet were cold
I shiver at this memory.
…Rains cold intensity
The downpour overcoming
Me
I'm sorry I could not see
My circle enclosed circles now
Circling
I knew the dark complete
As our smoke heavenward arose
To late this pittance; ash offerings
Ashes on the ground
Then came the rivers rage
Cutting its path through the heart
Forever too leave
Forever leaving its mark
Upon our forest dark
Meandering on; its choosing path
And I with it beside; belonged
For a chosen time
My love again I say
For a chosen time
Do you understand?
I chose the time of days
My shame

Astronomical grey
Leaving a touch of white
Within its darkest pores
Petals floating on down
To the reflective waters
That latch onto
Its very essence
Imploring grace
Deep into the center of grey
Which the flower envelopes
And is created into
A color world
It’s nice to see some grey
To fill the void
That exists when color
Is absent and obliterated
The noble being
Of this flower
Blooming through the darkness
Becoming grey from the light
That arrives in truth
Even the water below
Is dark, everything is black
But the slight white
That makes the grey
Come alive
The flower overcame
Darkness

i am from you have to work for it
from worthless and invisible
i am from hatred.
i am from 7
from black and white
i am from not begin accepted for who i am
i am from you are who you are for a reason
from depression to anxiety
i am from i want to be happy
i am from Spanish
from puerto Rican to dominican
i am from slang
i am from Michigan to Indiana
from drugs and alcohol abuse
i am Tiffany (12.22.11)
i am from grandmas house
from Christmas tree to scary costumes
i am from big celebrations
i am from don't talk back
from sleeping in
i am you fend for yourself
i am from the heart and soul
from beat and rhythm
i am from hip-hop and r&b
i am from jeep music
from slow jamz to gospel
i am music
i am from Illinois
from small town
i am bloomington
i am from two human begins
from the womb inside my mother
i am Ayanah

All I see in a superficial world,
Are fake grins,
Snotty comment,
Catty remarks,
I'm silent in the wings,
Hidden,
Seen only by my fellow shadows.
But we who are the silent,
We see the knives in the backs,
The disgustingly sweet smiles that mask malevolent intent.
I can see through the fake silence
To the inner cacophony.
Real silence is lost to the petty,
Who have small minds for all they talk about are others.
Not one of us dares to step in and wipe off the face that they wear
But I am tired
I hate to see the ignorant people
Who pretend to know everything,
But I feel the need to tell them that what resides in their heads is nothing but fluff.
I pity this misguided youth,
Who are taught that they are never good enough.
So I step out of the shadows,
And wipe away the paint.

The demons are out tonight.
I can feel them running up and down my spine.
It’s nothing but rag water and blue ruin.
They won’t rest until I hurt something or somebody.
I must vent or die.
Better to do it now than wait.
Waiting only causes more pain to those I love.
The dogs are restless they know I am not right tonight.
I have this razor sadness
That only gets worse when the Southern Pacific pulls out of the world.
There is no place to go and no place to be
Except with this clanging and sorrow that knows no home.
I count the tears on the counter and they don’t mean anything.
Salt and water a sorry excuse for loneliness.
And the demons they keep peeking their ugly heads out
Feels like the whole damn town is ready to blow.
I reach out and tug on someone’s coat and spill over the side.
Then like metal raining down on your shores it stops.
I have transferred the pain.
I am one again.
And you now suffer my sorrow.
The demons are happy and I am sad.
It is life-eating life.

I have drunk from the cup of Sorrow,
Yet my thirst has not been slaked.
So I drink from the cup of Pain,
And I have slaked my thirst at last.
For I now bear the fruits of agony,
Because I have drunk from both cups.
I know Pain,
My closest friend.
I know Sorrow,
My dearest comfort.
I can not turn my back to the pain,
Nor to the sorrow.
They are my allies,
And yet, they are also my enemies.
I can not run from either,
But nor can I stay with them.
My heart is broken,
I know true agony.
For my friend, my mentor,
You are now the deceiver, the traitor.
I will walk this earth,
Bearing both pain and sorrow in my heart.
Nothing will ease my burdens,
For now I am the bearer of Agony's greatest triumph.

A heavy weight
Black shadows
Upon the shoulders
Lead heavy
As wings fall
Expelled from
The garden
That of Eden
Bent down
In grief
I cried
love lived
My burning passion
Shattered to
be saved
Broken grows stronger
Like a fireworks
Lighting up
The sky
On my knees
I fell
without mercy
As the cobra
Danced around truth
Biting emotions
To the ground
Drove straight
Into the dark side
Of a dream
Boiling nightmares
Sewing hell
Into the deep
A distorted face
Clouds vision
No longer
Do I see
Beautiful colours
Instead of petals
Your thorns
Rip the heart
Black turns
The rose and dies
Growing two horns
Boiling stew
Seething hot pain
To begin roasting
Pushing to
the deepest
Tormenting in hell
Hissing spitting out
A poisonous
stew of words
A forked tongue
The deceiver
Crawling under
The skin
Coiling serpent
Without truth
Burning lies
Twists then turns
Destroyer of dreams
Nightmares burns
A circle
Drawn with
a poisonous tongue
Within hell
Dancing moths
In silver shadows
Reality one
see's light

Seemingly standing alone,
In the shadows of doubt and fear,
Lost, cold, forgotten,
Cold is the grasp of death that nears
Seeking a hand in darkness of solitude,
Wishing for nothing but a love,
Turned away, cast aside, borne not even a stray, lone thought,
Towering aloft, looked down upon from far above
Throned so high overhead, just as kings of old,
Glared down upon, a lowly tear forsaken so,
Caught within a trap, drowning, mists of sorrow,
A voice unheard, a voice deserted, only a voice in woe
Wandering such great, forlorn paths,
A derelict mind harshly beat, a mind that has since long been vacant,
Rove, this neglected child does,
One mind among so many, outcast, this dolor mind abeyant.

In this darkest of times,
come, be with me,
let us live our lives by moments,
tie ribbons to this morning’s rain,
count the clouds,
sing to each other
in a language known only to us,
lie still on white pillows,
shelter in place.
Then, it will not matter.

Now in the shadows a figure hides
Unmerciful rain collapses on my rooftops
The mind struggles to recollect lost senses
You take me on a victorious voyage to the Island of Paradise
Riding the waves of my intuition, I call for it
“Bring us the light at the end of the tunnel,”
I holler in the shade with Niagara Falls of hope
I hear you call to me gently in the dead of night
Why hide in the dust in the shame of frivolous defeat?
We graze in fields of forever gracious flowers as we lock hands
Don’t you worry—my patience is instilled in the dark
You elevate me higher than the clouds drifting wistfully
I trace your outline as my eyes acquaint with mystery
We have a slippery escape—a ride on a dolphin’s back
Staring…filled by the watery cadence
We sing merrily as we approach the trail of vitality
Trampled that you cannot accept my trust
The waves of the ocean bubbles us up with rare grace
I trace a detailed picture of you in the air
We ran faster than the breeze, rapidly brewing
I sketch in your panic eyes, furrowed gaze—and sigh
Give us words of wisdom to uplift our troubled souls
Not a cringe of movement, yet still I wait to create
We have to leap into the ring of fire—but how?
Imagination brought us together—now shadow, come out!
Let us be brave like the lion in the prairie…send us strength
Collaboration by Laura and David Breidenthal
*note: We wrote line after line without seeing the others' lines, and it actually came out quite nicely I think. : ) *
April 28, 2014

You find someone who intimidates you.
They have something that you want badly.
And therefore they are superior, the few.
You would do any thing to have the same.
Sitting in your dark world, festering now.
It is cold and quiet in the world you know.
A desire for something and wondering how.
To do what needed to be done to get the same.
If only you were like that person, all the better.
Why should they have something and you not.
You now feel jealous to no end and seem bitter.
Maybe this person is a friend or a friendly neighbor.
But that does not matter, they really should share.
What makes them any better then you anyways.
You do not want to cause harm but maybe fear.
Just enough that they see the seriousness of it.
You feel people look down at you and make fun.
Maybe if you had the same qualities as they did.
The more it festers and then you end up with a gun.
But does it have to be this way, why not just share.
They were the innocent one with no wrong doing.
But you just could not leave it all behind you now.
And now this madness has given you a new viewing.
Now you sit in a cell with nothing but growing envy.

A dark room with a small wooden desk, no lamp
A thick pad of paper and a typewriter, never used
Like a museum exhibit, though they aren’t allowed to gather dust
And dead flies and moths, a pack of playing cards
I never learnt to play, but still they’ve turned yellow with age
The shelves full of books, thumbed and read a million times
The pages fall out sometimes onto the slanted shelf, broken
The cascade of over-used books falling into each other
A literary car crash
The carpet burnt by years of clumsiness, dark and worn
The ceiling stained by years of nicotine, the cigarette smoker
Looking on at a world frozen, the books are the only living things
Read a million times and thumbed to death, the dirty pages blending into each other
The faces and the timeless, frozen authors and poets, trapped here forever
In the corner, a lonely television set, never used and not even plugged in
The lonesome keyboard, beaten a million times, my voice recorded
The German tongue, screamed above piano murder, the manslaughter of my violin
A cultural car crash
The curtains, white to ivory to ashen, unopened in an age
Time to let the world come in through the never-before-seen window
I sit upon the bed and watch the silhouettes gather, their vagabond army
Creeping over everything with their tired and dirty little hands
The books I’ve read to death, the literary suicide, gathering in a spot of light
Like flocking birds fleeing for the winter, their matted feathers and scabbed legs
They can’t fly anywhere, trapped here, my favourite victims, dead within the covers,
Like broken pigeons trapped within damning cages. I close the door and leave
The untouched car crash

I walked amongst the shadows
through a solitary door
into the night.
Where there is nothing,
not even a bare glimmer of light.
Clouds gather up high
like my memories floating on by.
With not a twinkling star in sight
nor a full moon so bright.
As my own footsteps
echo in my ear.
There is nothing
inside of me
but this overwhelming
and blinding fear.
Where do I go?
Not even I know.
Which way do I turn
in this confusing maze
of pathways.
Where no one stops
and no one stays.
When will I ever learn?
With the sounds of the night
a night watchman takes flight.
The howling wind
like a tortured soul
that never ends.
Haunting whispers
of ghosts from the past.
How long will this loneliness last?
When will I be strong enough
to fight and break free
of fear’s icy grip?
To let it not tear me apart
nor render me defenceless.
When does the night end?
Where it leaves you outside alone
and in distress.
Cowering like a child
against the darkness
with mercy’s hand
just out of reach.
And with time the dawn will come,
ushering the night
into the horizon’s keep.
No more will I fight
the dread of sleep,
until the night yet again wakes.

If only it were so simple,
to cruise through life smelling roses;
but the obstacles blacken the countryside,
and we unwittingly crush them beneath our boots.
Dreams sustain us through the madness;
goals give a finish line to our race.
Yet they change with every turn, around every wall,
and remain elusive throughout the quest.
Mistakes are made, and regrets are our luggage;
we will drag them with us to slow us down.
The victories are flashes of light, sudden and unlasting, which allow us
to glimpse the road ahead before darkness descends.
Love is bitter, yet it is the bread that keeps us.
Over and over it fills us up, only to starve us.
The people whom we love shape our destinies and our strengths,
yet leave us cold and alone in the darkness.
There are others trying to race to the end;
occasionally, we bump into one or two.
The bonds we form help us down the path less lonely
but eventually, we lose each other in the darkness.
Alone is not a bad way to be;
it clears your head and focuses you on the journey.
Cherish the short intervals during the quest you have with others,
but be prepared to walk alone in the darkness.

Surronded by meanies
Not knowing what they do
Hurting a pride
Without any care
Knocking down feelings
With a hammer of words
Slamming hate on you
Like a slate and a nail
Waiting for another
Unsuspecting victim

I just drank a fifth of vodka
A lot on my mind
I start crying
But not because I'm sad or scared
It just feels like I'm supposed to
Razor blade in my hand
Ready to cut my flesh
First I slit my neck
Then both wrists
See the blood drip
Feel it running down my skin
Hear it hit the floor
Smells great
One taste & reality hits
Blood is gone
No cuts
Or tears
A voice says,
"This is your future"
Then I wake up

I lie awake, hearing the wind
Winter, that coils in the breast of night
Glides in from the fields,
Eerie sounds through window sills
When night, soon perishes into dawn
A morning, slender and pale
Still dark with shadowed swill
Reveals such hapless sight
The wretched carpet, rubble and plight
Like broken wings from dark of night
Finds limb and bough mere ghosts
Of trees, battered, forsaken
By violent rage of night

Murder me in morning mist,
lead me towards the dark abyss.
Where angels cry and demons rest.
Where hearts don't beat beyond your chest.
I search for you among the dead,
but all I find are broken threads...
Broken hearts that are ever still...
Broken faith and broken will.
The dark consumes the world at hand
Greed and lust is their command
Silent tears fall on soft sand
I cannot find you in this land
I wake to find you don't exist
and yet my body can't resist
the thought of feeling your gentle kiss...
So... please murder me in morning mist...

How it must feel to be homeless, all alone on the streets of this world
I ponder this quite often, wondering where I would go if I had no where else to go
Dropping through the cracks of our society into the dark subtext of this world's heart
How would I ever crawl out of such a grimy, jagged crevice back into what I would call life
Protecting myself from the blackened hearts of our populous
Where would I get hope from when the truth is so horrible and lies seems so beautiful
Would I steal for food when I'm starving for strength
Would I kill for security, just to be safe and not for another night weep
I wish not to think about how dark the darkness would grow that's already inside of me
And through my thoughts I find that this world doesn't resemble me
Doesn't value the same moral fiber as I do, doesn't share the same deduction as I do
And I search for why I am here, why I can't seem to survive in this alien world
“God why am I even alive in a world that I'm so different from that I can't survive”

Though the future looks gloom
Don't you give up
When you're put all the way down
Get back up on your feet
Always know that there
Are hard times
But don't dwell on them
The pleasant times are yet to come
When you get shot down
Always get up
There are more than one way
To climb up that ladder of success
So when people around
Want you to fail
Just ignore them and keep going
Because you'll beat them in the end
-Don't give up
You can do it
-Don't give up
You have potential
-Never give up
Listen to me
And you'll thank me in the end
Though it feels as if the future isn't so bright
Instead, it's just dark with no light
But don't think about it
Just go ahead and fight
And you'll see that I'm right!
You wanna stay on
The positive side
Never stoop so low as to
Stray down the dark and easy path
Nothing good can ever
Come from it
And there is no need to be like me
Because you still have your first chance
-Don't give up
Don't be like me
-Don't give up
It's not impossible
-Never give up
You heard me
So keep your head up and keep moving
Though the future looks like it won't contain light
Always know the dark goes, leaving the path bright
So don't ever doubt
And just fight your way through
And then you'll see that I'm right!
What I would do to get your opportunity
What others would do to be in your shoes
You should know that you're lucky
So raise your head and push forward
-Don't give up
-Don't give up
-Never give up
Though it feels as if the future isn't so bright
Instead, it's just dark with no light
But don't think about it
Just go ahead and fight
And you'll see that I'm right!
Though the future looks like it won't contain light
Always know the dark goes, leaving the path bright
So don't ever doubt
And just fight your way through
And then you'll see that I'm right!

Would you show me how you sleep so sweetly
Or could you teach me how not to dream
Mine have been deliberately consuming
Considerately they've been killing me
With reoccurring nightmares
Of creaking cemetery gates
The silent screams among the undead
As they lay me down within my grave
My heart beats restlessly inside of panic
Anticipating this hell I've never met
But it promised me that it missed me
Through all the nights I never slept
Its fingers grip tightly around my throat
The other hand covers my eyes
It hated that I believed in God
And all of His softly unspoken lies
Then I awake within a deeper panic
I still feel the impressions of its hands
Lord how many nights will I be pulled under
Before your heavens will take me back
~JJF ~

Everybody's dieing,
I can see the bodies falling around me,
crashing down like dead trees,
white faces and cold hands,
touching me lightly,
then landing on the cold hard ground.
This life's dark,
like a big dark room,
there is no life,
because all I see, feel, and hear is death,
striking down the world with his violent hands.
He kills them all,
untill I'm the only one left,
one by one he takes them,
leaving me on this dark earth alone.
Save me lord,
save me,
nevermind, you can't.
I'm going to die,
I will die alone.

There's a monster in my closet.
It lurks around waiting for me
to sleep.
It peeks through the crack in
the door.
It's angry and dark.
It destroys what it does not like
and in the end it destroys me.
The monster is becoming
impatient.
Soon the closet doors will open
and it will release it's anger on
everything that has ever hurt
it.
But the monster knows if this
happens, it could end up
hurting itself.
My eyes flutter, trying to send
me to sleep.
But I hold my eyes open,
contemplating what would
happen if I let the monster
free.
Would that destroy it?
Or would I turn into the
monster?
Every night, me and the
monster have tea parties as I
let it slip into my mind only for
the night.
In the morning it returns to the
closet where I make it stay.
I remind myself not to open
the doors, I don't need to
change.
What I'm wearing is fine.
This outfit hides the monster
inside of the closet...
Every failure, every bad name,
every embarrassment I throw
on the monster.
The monster despises me.
Why can't I let this monster
free?
Only when I am alone I can let
the monster breathe for no one
is there to receive it's pain
except me.
I am alone with the monster.
The monster in my closet.
I hold back the monster.
I hold back the pain.
I hold back every tear and
every punch hoping it will go
away but it only makes the
monster stronger.
Will the monster ever go?
Will it ever be free?
Will it ever destroy me?
Or is it already destroying me?
Slowly.
Slowly.
Through the mind.
It lurks in the closet.
It peeks through the cracks.
Foreshadowing the monster's
RELEASE.

It’s not fair
But then it never is
All the teachers
All the learning that they got
It couldn't prepare them
Could it?
It couldn't stop it
Or halt it
Or even control it?
The whirlwind that is I
All the promises and
All the lies
It was all too much
It was never enough
I tried
They didn’t
The whispers behind my back
The taunts, and jeers;
Even the teachers
Who are supposed to protect
and keep order;
Just walk away
Just ignore her
She’ll go away
Yes Mrs. Mother
Well stop it
Don’t worry
Freak
Vampire
Weirdo
She has coodies
She’s creepy
No one likes you
Go away
No one wants’ to play with a lesbian like you
It would be so much better if she were gone
I wish she would just leave forever
Would it?
Could it?
Was it?
I left
I hide
I never showed my face
But you still;
What did I ever do to you?
What could I have done to you?
I was only ten
Just barely out of childhood really
But I can't really blame you...can i?
No I can't
My only option left
Was silence
Did it make you happy?
Did you smile?
Was all that work
All that cruelty
All that heartache;
Was it worth it?
Did it finally make you feel better?
Like you were better,
More powerful?
Who was your next victim?
Never mind.
Not like it matters
They didn't help them either
I suppose
You can't see
You refuse to see
Just like the teachers
They all failed
Not only me
But you
And
Every
Other
Child
That
Was
Forgotten,
Lost,
And
Alone.
I hope you all are proud.

sleep eludes me
this cold spring night
cats meowling just before light of dawn
I set outside in m dark heavy sweater
the air is cold and damp the dark clings as I walk the yard
restless I think of a proper walk
instead I stand in the yard
listening

a well dressed mess,
I am but a man
with a sinister past
seeking redemption.
b*tching,
venting,
& ranting.
are three verbs I tend
to utilize while writing.
because writing is my outlet,
my craved for aperture,
even my superlative release
in the pursuit of an escape
from a reality which once
was capable of compelling
my lips to crease into a smile,
but now only fills my chest
with the tension of a thousand
cold-sweat soaked nightmares.
These three vulgar verbs
keep my mind lucid
through my abdication
of actuality for the
necessary occupation
of thought required
to keep these demons
composed of crushed pills
and empty bottles at bay.
I feel the genius today.
I love every word, letter,
and line that I'm writing.
but tomorrow I'll hate this.
I'll think this sh*t is worthless
as I consider deleting it all.
Yet I can't part with it.
like my utter inability to
forget & let go of this fading
amatory connection whose
love once gave me hope as
well as sex that left scars,
both cerebral and somatic.
I loved her so f***ing much
and if I'm being honest,
I must admit I still do.
as a parting favor
I simply ask you not
to confound these
words I write with
apathy and despair;
they may sting off
the tip of my tongue
but they come from
a place that's sincere
and filled with more
than mere goodwill.
I simply have a crestfallen
& despondent perspective.
This, too, will
pass with time.
or so they say.

In the back of bars,
Places my soul Shouldn't
Be.
But isn't this an
Altar, just like the
One you worship?
Differences and
Similarities are
One in the same.
Ignominy, and I
Smug your face
as you do mine.
Soon we'll waste
Away and forget
We even had this
Ridiculous Discourse.

~A Poem That Took A Week Or More To Write~
Scars Left Behind.
Scarred since birth born with a congenital deforming cleft lip
abandoned unacceptable by nobody I don't belong to your
universe I don't belong to be a guest in your domiciles as I am
avoided I don't belong to share a sunrise as I am blindfolded
I don't belong to your beauty parlor as I look repugnant
I don't belong to participate to a party as I am nameless
I don't belong to be present at a birth of a new born banned
to come closer to the mother.
Scars at birth.
My solitude drove me to flee towards one site the lighthouse
stand alone far away far maybe my voice might be heard
begging to be saved from the sufferings on this earth as my
anguish has no end.
My soul will only triumph while waiting for the sun of love
the moon of light the stars that shine I will wait,wait to pick
up the echo of the passing vessels listen to the whisper of
the winds getting windier watch the dark waters drifting off
flowing away blown back towards the shore a farewell leaving
me alone.
Scars till I die
Who shall I belong to? I have no friends its so obscure outside
there is so much stillness around me afraid alone aware of my
shadows disappearance I called for anybody`s support to facilitate
my survival alleviate my pain nobody came I need to rest and allow
my soul to escape who will? who can? who wants to rescue me?
I am tired I was left behind scarred without a mother or father
nor brother or sister I tried but could not save myself.
My soul drifting as I could not belong to someone watch over me
love me feed me talk to me look at me even scarred run with me
when I am old to the harbor before the ship sails but I flawed I had
no strength nobody heard a word everybody ignored me.
Help Me
The ship sailed leaving without my soul because none came to
liberate me I am still homeless and scarred.
Help me to forget help me to survive can anybody do that?
Please.
Therese Bacha
June 26 2013

I am monster
the Osiris of lost souls
lurking in the moonlit shadows
I am Frankenstein unbound
among hungry crows and grackles
I creep over the scared ground
of good and evil...
Where lies my monster bride?
I am kneeling and wailing
for her to complete and release me
from these shackles and chains
of this hellish Gothic pain and sorrow
to offer me absolution
from the atrocities of the flesh I have committed...
I am the fiendish brute
who grows fangs and hair
when the almanac forecasts a full moon
and the sky is crying meteor showers
among random bolts of lightning
I howl and shriek in terror
I am mortal seeking to become immortal
gazing in the mirror I behold a monster...
Much like Frankenstein
If I can't be beautiful I wish to be invisible
I can only be saved
by the love of a beautiful woman
I burn to be inside of her
to find her by a sun baked moonstone
to save me from this cursed life
that I have lived from alpha to omega...
I am Adam reanimated seeking Eve
fleeing inescapable horror as if it were life itself
longing to avoid being impaled by the wooden stake of loneliness
I fear I am becoming a fallen angel
living in the night of the dark soul
my pendulum swings towards you my cherubim lover
for I have love in me like none has ever seen...
My love remember this
when I find you and see you
I will come after you like a hurricane
and even though I am among the undead
I will not stop loving you
until at last the earth quakes
and mountains rise from the sea
shaking the very ground you walk on..
~ ~ ~

I hide here and there,
In a place that snares,
Sometimes full of my blares,
Full of ensnared traps...
I hide here and there,
In a place with many affairs,
Where my enemies are bare,
Where I can make them flee and hare...
I hide here and there,
In a place that only friendship knows,
A place located in the air,
A place below on earth,
Where no plow can cut its soil...
I hide here and there,
In a place with vast plains,
A place with deep and misty forests,
A place with an unreachable sky,
A place where flowers might bloom...
I hide here and there,
In a place where I can hide in my cloak,
A place where I breathe silently,
A place where I contemplate nature,
Where humidity longly persists,
In a place where I scream and no one listens...
I hide and there,
In a place where unwanted can get afflicted,
A place of bright darkness,
A place of dark lights,
Where nothing owns me...
I hide here and there,
In a place where my biggest wishes are spared,
A place where blood won't be splashed,
A place where tears might be shed,
A place where time and space are fair,
A place with some mare surfaces,
Where fear might be gone...
In a place where all sins might be forgiven,
A place where my instinct is tamed,
A place where my mind is thoughtful but reserved,
A place where my heart is controlled,
The place where my deepest secrets are held,
The place where I am the seer,
The place where my soul will forever reign,
The place I can call a hiding place...

So, you want to know what is in my chest.
Well there is no silver,
there is no gold,
There is no hope,
there is no love,
there is no girlfriend;
there is no food,
there is no charm,
there is no honesty,
there is nothing in my chest.
It is empty,
filled with cobwebs and dust,
with a couple spiders hanging around
looking for something to eat.
I am like the spiders
looking for something to eat,
ingest hope, love, charm and honesty.
No pirates will come and take my treasure chest away.
There is nothing for them to take,
but they don't know of the secret compartment,
filled with poetry,
filled with art,
filled with culture,
filled with my own love
that I am willing to share.
Everyone always looks in the chest,
but never finds that secret compartment!
What a shame, for if they found that secret,
they would see life for what it really was.
My treasure chest is a mystery too most people.
I hope you all know,
next time you look in someone's chest
look for the hidden door,
because that place holds the most beautiful of things.
-9/20/13-
For the conest: What is in your Treasure Chest
Written by: Christopher Boskovski

Fee fi fo fum
The smell of blood and rum
As on the giants abode
Legends were foretold
As wolves stand as packs
To kill and attack
A hero rises
From the flames
From the ashes
Rise blood hunter
Rise from doom
Rise from scourge
Rise above them all
Where people die
A painful death
And corpses left
Stacked aside
Never buried
As monsters walk
Among us
As the walk
Goes slower
And blood gets thicker
By this moment you might be
Yes you might be dead
With blades side by side
Rise blood hunter
And slay them all
Rise from doom
Rise from scourge
Rise above them all.
Need Comments!
Yes Comments!
TAT

Broken hearts
Black as tar
A sister’s love burned away
Forever replaced with irreversible hate
Reach for light before the night forever takes
Your soul away
Fight the night, seek the light
Sisters’ love
Can be an unbreakable bond
A soul slowly baptized
In Lucifer’s detestation
Chipped away until only the shell remains
Once sisters bathing in the rays of life
Separated, in pain, for losing the way
One sister reaching for the other
The other sister stretching her hand down
Down into the very depths of hell
Were Lucifer holds her very soul
And basks in the very pain
He so easily created
Lucifer prince of pain
King of darkness
Walks among the broken hearts
Seeping in his blackened tar
Until the shell is all you see
And the soul is but a memory

saloons are just another form of dealing with depression
I hate drinking away nights
saying yes to bartenders
saying no to reality
take a dip in the cold waters
harsh and real
life is for losers I thought
but maybe I should really try living sometime

Her being hangs on two faces of her mind,
one overlooking the essentials and joy of life
as those half-blind eyes reflect what she sees…
is it that Shadow of obsession or power’s lure
where temptation brews her world,
reeling loosely into a charcoaled hole
and onward through the never of her mind?
The other face clutches moths’ kisses
sweet its glow among dawn’s baby roses
as her heart finds kindness in giving
that flavors the potion of her sunlit dance
and onward through the never of her mind.
In agonizing braille of the dark, she crawls
regaining awareness to mold one face,
proud the shadowed one charged with venial sins…
till Michael’s Light tramples a serpent’s pounce
while baby roses lead the way,
a most graceful of all choices in her world.
and onward through the always of her mind.
..................
Anthony Slausen's Gods and Devils Contest
1/18/2015

sometimes i talk to myself,
my mind is racing,
i dont know what to do...
so hard to explain.
depression isn't a stage
or a faze some kids go through
it shatters you...
i saw it all.
she cried silent in her bed,
blood stains covered her favorite jeans,
her every shirt,
long sleeve ofcourse...
she suffered through it all with few people to call friend
and more to call enemy
even more to say where quite dissappointed....
FAT
her first name in school,
not started by a bully
or a mean rival,
but by her sister,
and it echoed through her soul,
repeating in her mind... over and over again,
like the ripples of still water
when a pebble is dropped
flash frozen in time
repeating,
over and over again...
It was the first name they gave her,
millions where created over the years,
some unique
some repeating again, just as the first had..
gothic they called her,
emo, fat, ugly....worse things.
but in her mind, things where worse.
everything was repeating,
over and over again,
finally she believed it.
she asked for help, from everyone
tried to explain to parents she wasnt well,
got called a psycho for asking to see a theripist,
not from a teacher,
not from a class mate,
but from her own father, who wouldn't, couldn't,
believe there could possibly be a thing wrong....
finally, crying, she confessed her bloody secret to a teacher.
rather then giving her time,
she is sent back to class crying her eyes out, as if she wherent going through enough...
she is sent to the principals office a few minutes later, after breaking down in class...
the princlipal says she needs help,
sends her and her dad for a risk evaluation,
her dads crying as she shows him her cuts...
they walk into a hospital room,
it smells of chemicals and hand sanitizer,
the lady at the desk gives her a smile.
then she goes into a room with a lady,
her cheeks are sunken in and shes wearing way too much makeup,
the girl is gaging on her perfume,
and she looks really intimidating....
her dark brown hair looks dead and flat
even though its a bit wavy,
and she wears somewhat of a mocking frown.
asks her all these questions,
is mommy beating her?
no
is daddy raping her?
no
is she doing drugs?
not alot
is anyone beating her?
pass...
did anyone molest her?
pass....
oxcarbezapine, trazadone, citalipran, clinazapam, colonipan,
valium, lithium, more.......
and thats what they gave her,
more...
some numbed the pain
some brought it out
tearing through her organs,
she became an addict by the time she was fourteen....
over dose after over dose
some for pleasure
some for pain,
gashes on her legs getting deeper,
this time she didnt tell a soul,
not even those she had come to call friends....
wakeup she screamed in her head over and over again
as she dropped weight like it was nothing....
you cant controll it she argued as things became worse.
at age fourteen she attempted suicide,
she didnt quite succeed.
the medication took away her aappitite....
she liked it
she hated her body
hated herself
felt out of controll
found a new way to cope
as she shoved tooth brush after toothbrush down her throat
to keep her body from nuitrients...
as she whent weeks and weeks spitting food into napkins and making excuses
I ate at my friends house....
spoken as a whisper
heard like a sentance
echoing in her mind over and over again,
along with that word, all the words,
FAT!!!!!!
ugy, anoying, stupid, fake, worthless, nothing...
one bite she would say
rocking back and forth
craving nothing but food
her body racked with hunger pain
one bite and there she was again
FAT!
over and over and over again
back to a toothbrush
this time she sees blood
she saw her ribs
she saw her bones,
it wasnt good enough,
she almost died, again....
choking on this deep dissappointment in herself,
gaging on everything they where pushing down her throat,
their words, and their insults, their criticism.... their drugs
all shoved down her throat like candy
and just as she was was trained to do she swallowed despite the bad taste
or the hurt
or the fact that at the rate she was going she would be dead soon...
and you know why?
because daddy yelled
and couldnt accept what was happening
not because he wanted to hurt her
but because it hurt him,
and she let him believe,
because she could take the hurt if it meant he didnt have too.
because mommy didnt want to sit in her room all day
smoking weed
doing nothing,
practically having us raise ourselves,
she didnt mean to take anger, or frustration or hurt out on her daughter
she suffered everyday in her solitary confinement,
and from a young age she accepted her bedroom was the cage
her mother had created for herself.
because sister didnt want to effect her the way she did
she was just frustrated
fed up with the way things where
scared, she needed someone to take her cruelty
and to help heal her pain...
because people in school
who where so cruel
had to have learned from somewhere
and she wasnt going to play into their games,
and they knew she was an easy target
because she would never attack someone so weak
and she accepted her suffering was a sacrafice
to help all these people....
to help her dad,
her mom,
her sister,
every person who was beaten abused or hurt
and felt so weak at home they wanted to feel strong in the one safe place they had.
because depite the fact she had died inside,
and almost passed away on the out,
it was a saccrafice she was willing to make
so that no one else would have to feel that kind of pain,
and they all inflicted it and broke her down'untill there was nothing left but a shell
of somthing that could have been
and never had the chance
and why?
because she would take it and wouldnt strike back,
because sometimes "just taking it"
isnt so much about the weakness not to do anything
but about the strangth not to hurt others the way they hurt you...

My soul is like a deep shadow
you can look into my darkness
with the brightest source of light in existence
and try as hard as you can to figure me out
yet, you cannot see all of me
which leaves you to wonder.
You stare into these dark eyes
trying to see into my mind
like a psychic attempting to read my thoughts
my eyes sparkle and speak to your soul
without a single word spoken
yet, they do not say what is on my mind.
You think that I am hiding something
behind this invisible mask
even a microscope would not help you to see it
my enduring love is no masquerade
I am longing to show you my shy heart
which is the only thing hidden within me.
I have a loneliness and a shyness about me
that you seem to find rather intriguing
you speak and I can only smile at you
even Sherlock Holmes would have trouble solving me
I am a mystery known only to myself
and I would like to keep it that way.

Ones who wage,
Ones who rage,
Ones who take,
Ones who pay,
Ones who craze,
Ones who rave,
Ones who crave…
Ones who fear,
Ones who breathe,
Ones who give,
Ones who need,
Ones who will,
Ones who weave…
Ones who plead,
Ones who beg,
Ones who beseech,
Ones who entreat,
Ones who appeal,
Ones who volunteer,
Ones who disappear…
The ones who follow,
The ones that don’t know about tomorrow,
The ones who don’t deserve the morrow…
The ones who sleep,
The ones who cry,
The ones who live,
The ones who die…
The ones who proclaim,
Those who say they create,
The ones who ache,
The ones who don’t wait,
The ones who hesitate,
The ones who don’t concentrate,
The ones who fornicate,
The ones who procrastinate…
Those who fall in temptation,
Those who get in frustration,
Those who sometimes feel desperation,
Those who keep going without caution,
Those in motion,
Those in tension,
Those losing notion,
Those being poisoned,
Those getting in distortion,
Those following the broken diction,
Those dying like the billions,
Those without unction,
Those washed in the oceans…
I might seem cold,
But it is you who is bold.
I might not express,
But it is you who doesn’t let me progress.
I might not seem like I seek,
But it is you who doesn’t know me…
I might seem like I need,
But it is you who might always be begging on your knees.
I might seem dull,
But it is the one that is fool.
I might not be alight,
But it is you who isn’t truly alive…
I will remain neutral,
I will remain silver,
I will remain gray,
I feel darkness,
I feel light,
I will remain hallowed…,
After all, it is you who deserves no life…
I am a metal hawk,
I am a mountain goat,
I am a silver bird,
I am a gray wolf,
I am a white tiger,
I am a mystic rose…,
I am I…
I’m alive,
And I survive,
You are here,
However, it is you who deserves no life…
Being human does not imply that you have humanity…

The first time i picked up a cigarette I told you and you fought me
because you said they were wrong,
After that i steered clear of them afraid of what would happen if i touched
them again, afraid of what rage you would put over me.
You were right though they were wrong, but you were worse,
You took over many lands that i owned and stripped me clean of freedom,
you tried taking the one good thing i had that made me feel innocent,
you held me down and took the covering off my body and whispered “trust
me”,
I stopped you before you went too far and you looked through me angrily,
angry that i didn’t let you, angry that you didn’t get what you wanted.
You tried over and over to get it,
and i fought every time to never let you get it,
You put me through mental hell and physical pain and hate,
after the constant rage and abuse i finally tried leaving,
you grabbed my wrists staring through me with pits from hell for eyes, and
you followed me home.
You stalked me and made me hate myself even more,
you blamed me for your mistakes, for everything you did
you left demons under my skin,
i can’t look in a mirror anymore without seeing “worthless” written on my
forehead.
The demons live in my head now and they’re never leaving,
they are stuck there, drowning me from the inside out.
I smoke cigarettes and drink a lot now too,
hoping if you ever came back you would not come near me since cigarettes are
wrong.

Everyday
I am trapped in a dimension
Where only repetition exists,
That reoccurs the colour theme of black.
But the windows are very visible from the doom,
Delineating bright sunlight and pavement colour of the moon.
Best of all, I can see the birds flapping their mighty wings.
I unfold my arms with barely any strength,
And reach for them,
Hoping to become one of them.
Again.
Every night and morning when the outside of the windows,
Is beautifully shaded with calming grey that mellows.
And when it is painted in soft blended colour of thick orange and light yellow,
Birds fly between South and North through the colour of fallow.
I can tell very easily without effort,
Each of them holds great stories
Because I was like them once,
Who also held great stories.
Yes, I was one of those birds,
With pride and strength,
That glided through the treasure sites,
And enjoyed when the warm breeze kissed my cheeks
Over golden sparkling oceans.
But now my wings are broken,
Memories and valuables torn apart in ashes,
In to pieces that cannot be glued back.
So I always whisper to myself,
With solemn remorse,
I sure do miss those days.

Her eyes never leave
the moonlit horizon.
She will wait
an eternity, if she must.
She paces
as the tides
crash forth, then recede
back to the ocean.
Only memories
return here.
The ship departing
from the docks,
the sun sparkling
on the water,
a pair of dolphins
jumping
through the surface.
They had seen it
while in each other's arms.
Yet, now they
are distant
memories.
The sky turned ominous,
dark waters
engulfed the ship.
Everything went dark,
they lost sight
of each other
beneath the churning waves.
Her lungs
filled with salt water
as she desperately
gasped for air,
for life.
She drowned
the same day he did.
Her soul
washed ashore
along with her
cold, lifeless body.
She remains
here,
haunting the coast.
Her feet leave
no imprints
in the sand.
She moves
with the wind,
drifts upon it,
like sea-foam
atop the waves.
The dark water
flows
through her
transparent form.
Her spirit's heart glows,
shining outward
like a lighthouse beacon
showing him the way
back
to her arms.
She is waiting
for him
to rejoin her.
He will return
just as she has.
Written by: Kelly Deschler October, 10th, 2013
nette onclaud's contest - "Take Two"
---------------------------------------------------------------
This was originally written for Poetess Darkly's contest -
"Heart Of The Sea"

Goddess of the blue…..
you can see her
on a silver drenched
moonlit night
Stretched across the sand
gazing the distance
and waiting on him....
She is a nymph
a wanton maiden of the sea
as it crashes her restless soul
and makes her desperate
to lay as only God intended
upon the shore
and feel the salt sting her face
her dark orbs are haunted
her warm tanned body is damp
she is like verdant green
and smoking sapphire
she whispers a silent beckon
to the blue….
the endless eternal
that reckless aquamarine that tempts
that provocatively motions her
to tumble back into this deep abyss
and sail the ship of demise’s dark eyes
that many an ocean dweller has fallen to
A goddess of foam
arising from the water
to birth and to knowing
Erotic
in her eyes lay the universe
and in her hands
lay the hearts
She has loved and lost
and some she may have broken
her wild hair is tousled
a little unkempt
while her body is nubile
whispering of temptation
how she loves the play
the freedom and the wind
the ponder on universal things
and that man that taunts her soul
yes, she is eternal searching
naked in the full moon light
for her souls companion
and when he comes
she will dance for him
arms raised high
fixed on his Adonis body
and his mysterious eyes
that capture her in infinite bondage
Goddess of the blue
you can see her
upon the sand
on a moonlit night
waiting on him…..

And the storm calls to me in ways you'll never understand
A gentle call that urges my soul forth
The lighting guiding a path for my feet to walk
Between the stones and ash of all that once was
I stand in the echoing silence of the rain
It drops down upon my skin like the blessing waters of heaven
Soothing me, lifting the weight from my body
I feel at once as if I am home
Standing amid two dimensions
Caught between two skies - here and there
The night wraping around me in warmth
The gentle wind lifting me off my feet
Drops from the clouded moon washing away my body
and I am left just a soul, an essence
The storm calls me forth from beneath my roof
Beckoning me into its depth
I stand among the reeds in the basin
They dance and sway as if welcoming me
And I sway with them back
Caught up in the power that charges the air
That threatens to sweep me away
If the ground will just loosen its hold
The thunder rumbles a low welcoming growl
And I get pleasently lost within it
I am so small compared to its vastness
I close my eyes and succumb to the skies wishes
Rising higher until my feet no longer touch the ground
My fingertips touch the liquid color of the stars
A sigh drifts from my lips
There is no need of thought to stay afloat
There is no demand to breathe in air
No crushing weight upon my chest
As my lungs struggle to survive
There are no struggles here
I make my bed on blackened clouds
And give in to the call
The storm has claimed me as its own
It was such a struggle to stay upon the ground
When the storm would call me home

"life can be warped into new beginnings, when you least expect it"
somber and dark the mood
embracing the abyss of his thoughts
twisted images of reality
engrossed in truth
lurking beyond the light
afraid –
reality seems too dark
maybe the light is the other way
too far to turn back
no crossroads in sight
"stick with what you know" the voice said
what if I don't know anything?
where to now?
lurking beyond the light
afraid
always
afraid
everything so twisted
emotions,
life,
even his heart...
twisted images of reality
engrossed in truth
Contest Name: A Poem, Please
By: Wilma N. Neels
100820111135

Shallow beneath the skin of one whom robs dreams of another soul
For the one whom is chosen may take away the glow
underneath the skin lies a shallow giver of sins
the depth within lives a shallow existence fueled by fear
fear that another may out shine the shallow light
why does one even wish to fight.. so shallow
ignites the solace of awareness around and grasp the right of another, so shallow
Dwelling within a secret shallow prodigy
~ shallow as the grave itself
may all others be cast to the gallows
for the one seeking Fame
the one so Shallow..
Many a wealthy men seeking moral values, so shallow
incapable of receiving any love given except the reflection of self , so shallow.
How can anyone help the one so shallow
unless trading their own integrity for shallow acceptance
comes with a high price , associated with shallow ~

One dark and dreary night many, many moons ago
myself and a friend coming home from the local disco
no names mentioned smiling . . .
and in the far distance we could see and hear three girls
laughing and giggling and having fun
This was Halloween Night or All Hallows' Eve . . .
and so we climbed up the nearest evergreen
barely breathing, holding our breaths . . .
so they would not hear us and sense our presence
the one directly in the middle as they neared us
in passing a quick clip at the back of the head said
do you want to hear the screams roaring out of
them away hammer and tongs up the road
We could hear them shouting and carrying on . . .
I'm sure that place is haunted
to this day they tell their story claiming it to be real
well better still was to come for both of us
laughing our hearts out giggling like madmen
I felt like a gruesome hand of ice just touched me . . .
the tremors ran down my spine
jolting me in a most terrible way
almost felt like a gripping sensation on my shoulder
almost falling of the tree with a roar
My good friend starting screaming making it worse . . .
saying somebody must of touched us the same time
we looked at each other and made a race to get home
just got really spooked and ran the whole 3 miles home
in a record time ever saying my holy prayers every stroll of the way . . .
a most hideous and macabre thought -- a ghost touched me
as the cold ran right through me chilling me to the bone
never was I as glad to see holy water in the house
I bless myself for being lucky
never ever have I pulled such a prank
from that night to this . . .
It backfired on us so we chose never to say
a word about it ever again!!
And now we can only say: BOO!! BOO!! BOO!!
And Happy Halloween!!
Liam McDaid and Gary Bateman, Free Verse Collaboration (October 13, 2014)
(Contest Entry for Halloween Co-Writes, 5 Nov 14, Diane Locksley - Sponsor)

The lights flicker
As the candle flame
As it grows weaker
And grows more dim
The howls are steadier
The feeling of grim
Drip drop
The sound of blood
I try to hold my breathe
That's too much
The stench
Too much death
Voices wailing
Of pain
And of agony
We're alone
But nothing is sure
As long as they exist
I'll live
Continuing my journey
With blades side by side
They'll tremble before me
Rise blood hunter
Pls. Do Comment after reading.
Pls....
Pretty Pls...
T_T

God bless little angels brought unto me,
Watch over them beneath heavens grace.
My first of seven blessings most precious gift,
Treasures hearts keepsakes.
Number one the oldest, my rocker baby,
Dancing away with musics sweet lullaby.
The lyrical light of brilliance’s, a shinning note,
That strums across grandma's heart strings.
The second child is a testament to patience,
No instructions came with this wonder
Or warning labels tattooed upon her backside.
But she has the eyes of an angel and lord knows,
She try's my beliefs but I'll never give up the fight .
I love my problem child just the same.
The third times the charms, she is that for sure,
With brown eyes and a kewpie doll with dark curls.
Our grand daughter bubbles, whom can light up the
Darkest moment with just a simple smile.
The fourth grace is he, full of strength and daring,
A future NFL first draft pick this is my little RJ,
Patton had his tank and believe you me, Me maw
Has hers.
Diamonds are the hardest stones known to man,
But this boy sparkles with a shine more valuable,
Then gold.
Fifth in line is wisdom and charm, explorations
Future astronaut.
With curiosities wondering eye, but ahead of
The pack in any game of life.
My youngest grand son Issac his name means,
Laughter and joy and in this it is so true.
Tiny but mighty is my little Bella,
With dark raven hair, she has her fathers eyes,
And mommy's brave spirit.
She'll take on the world someday.
And win by all hands clapping her on,
Me Maw's future Mrs. America.
Seven was born on grandma's birthday,
A special gift given unto me is my darling,
Trinity.
Who knows what the future will hold for thee,
But seven has always been my lucky number,
So sky's the limit with this the youngest blessing,
In my life.
1. The blessings gift is music.
2. The second blessings gift mischief and curiosity.
3. The third blessings gift beauty's sweet smile
4. The four blessings gift strength and endurance.
5. The fifth blessings gift wisdom and charm.
6. The sixth blessings gift is a brave spirit.
7. The seventh blessings gift is lucks true fortune.
And when you add up all my many blessing,
What does a grandmother receive a full heart,
Hugs and kisses at bedtime.
Good night my little angels and sleep tight.
I'll re-sight my many blessings in my prayers,
Tonight as I lay myself asleep and dream of thee.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

From fathoms deepest keep, where man,
Shall not dare go, a white toothy giant
Dwells, with hatred's malice, this is a living man
Eater, whom lies at the bottom of the ocean.
In this striking zone, of deadly encounters,
Here where dead men tell no tails, crimson
Currents of the lifeless, float to the top of the food
Chain, and their last breaths of air explode, as
Bubbles above at the surface,
Leaving nothing behind but a bloody residue,
And the wreckage mangled life raft, and one word
Still lingers on the foreboding breeze, as a screams
Echoing drowns into whispers in silences last refrain,
SHARK!
Nay this aquatic Phantom, called Submarine,
Is the gray ghost that stalks within every human
Beings nightmares, just below the waves of our
Subconscious fears, a demon lurks in the darkness,
Of the murky shallows, waiting to take a bite
Out of us.
A thirty-seven foot killing machine, with razor
Blades of jagged ivory's, moving at velocities mega
Speed, heading straight for humanity's beach,
His favorite hunting grounds.
A leviathan of a shark, highly intelligent,
Circling his preferred prey called man,
The hunter is ready to appease his
Insatiable appetite that is never satisfied,
In a carnivores blood bath of mayhem,
Just off shore of paradise.
In hell's kingdom many souls scream from
Below one word that echoes through the
Chum filled surf above, SHARK.
For these are the latest victims, of
The Submarines wrath, and now they do
So warn the living, beware of this sharp
Toothed Giant!
Look into the black eyes of death, take
Notice if he bares the scare of men,
And notches gouge mark on his dorsal fin,
For than thee shall know for sure, if
It is truly the gray ghost,
Known as Submarine.
If thou’ art sure, than say your final prayers unto God,
And inhale one last deep breath of air,
Than swim away, as fast as you can,
For humanity is now on the menu!
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

In total darkness
My helpless naked body
Like a mere rag doll
Is tossed precariously
Into the cursing unforgiving
freezing sea
My body in shock
I am petrified filled with fear
And find it hard to breath.
My limbs tossed and thrown about
At the mercy of the towering cursing waves
That has taken so many unmercifully
To the murky depths
And a watery grave.
The freezing cold cuts and bites my tender skin
And as I swirl around against my will
My head is in a spin
I'm getting tired and more tired
As the waves crash and get increasingly higher
Drifting in and out of consciousness
Never knowing what will happen next
And when I will expire.
I just want to sleep
I hope I will soon die
I give out primal screams
But there's no one to hear my cries.
The sheer noise of the thunderous waves
Deafens me and hurts my ears
I become delusional
Calling out for mother
And cry so many tears.
I sense the sharks are gathering
To frenziedly rip and tear my flesh
And drag me down into those dark, freezing murky depths.
My bones to lay on the ocean bed
And soon to be covered by silt and sand
Soon to be forgotten
As though I'd never existed as a person
Or a man
At peace at last.
Peter Dome copyright.2014.

THE LAST STAND
Where have all my people gone, the Navaho, Lakota, and the Sue.
Smothered beneath the white man blanket,
Chocking for a breath of airs life's sustaining oxygen.
The beating heart of native drums, are stilled frozen,
In the middle of it's rhythmic thumping, no pulses echo,
Can be heard on the open plain.
The weeping women kneel on sacred ground, shedding
A river of bloods tears, burning a permanent scare across,
A baron landscape.
Death's black raven shields itself, under it's crimson soaked wing,
Against shames immoral injustice.
Greed's unsatisfiable hunger for land and riches fuels lusts desire,
Behold exterminations nay holocaust of the native inhabitance,
Nothing remains alive except ignorance blackened shadow.
How much blood can mother earth be forced to drink before,
She drowns herself or spits up everything undigested,
With sheer disdain and hatreds malice intent.
On a black and white chess board the winners takes it all,
Strategies grand masters playing with living pawns.
Treaties written in vanishing ink, promises disappear in thin air,
Revealing a liars sharpened tongue.
The odds have always been stacked against those believing in fairness.
A rogue tidal wave of humanity has wiped out a nation,
And it's culture within the blink of an eye.
Flights appendages are clipped on the dove of peace, leaving it
Unable to soar above it's own habitat.
Wreckage’s refugees stumble in the ruins after math,
Rapes victims of civilizations civilized,
Are left devoid of their heritages lineage and legacy.
Elders chieftains representatives of a great nation,
Smoke peace pipes in the white mans hunting lodge
In Washington.
As human beings are hauled like cattle's cargo,
Taken to reservations burial grounds.
Ancient ancestors lit up the heaven's vast expanse,
By torches flame,
To guide the souls of the dead unto their great spiritual
Plain beyond.
The pale horse gallops forward without a rider,
And the red people become a phantom tribe vanishing
Upon the winds shifting tides.
Giving one last final trible battle war cry,
Why my father but the great spirit answers not.
Behold America's legacy, a world trampled beneath
It's heavy iron fist, all in the name of progress or for the cause
Of Manifest destiny.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

We approach the house, to trick-or-treat, but wonder if we dare
The porch is dark, no light or spark, to help us find the way
We peek inside, ........does the old man hide? We see no one is there
But, we rang the bell, and wait a spell, the door begins to sway
Through the crack, pursued, a room is bare with unclad shades of gray
Arthritic winds have tossed us in, with a wretched dismal hand
The trees bend low, against the house with solemn loathing dread
With branches, brisk, it rattles glass, against the window pane
We look around the cheerless room, a terrible scent of wrong
An angled light has slithered in, with shadows deep and long
and spotlights what's become of him, the man who isn't there...
with a room unkempt, some muffled steps, and as if a ghost might stare
Four vinyl seats, Formica clad, a room that needs repair
The table set, a plate of food, is rotting by the chair
A cup of cold, a cigarette, still smoking in the air
The room depicts, what might have been, but reeks with wrought despair
A parakeet within a cage has mocked us once again
The voice is shrill, it squawks with rage, 'Unlock me if you dare!'
The floor is strewn with littered seed, where mice have shared the spill
All time has stopped, in ash and dust, the hours couldn't care.......
We take a breath, too scared to move, for we are not alone
For company, a skeleton, sits beside the sofa's edge
against the wall, it smiles at us beneath the window ledge
No eyes to stare, yet seems surprised...as if a joke is played
Inaudible, just barely heard, the wind begins to howl
Or is it we, who scream to be back home in Mommy's arms
Outside the house, we hear an owl, and we begin to run
into the night, into the light, without a bit of fun!
No Snicker Bars, no Tootsie Pops, no candy corn or Mars
A trick on us, no treat it was......we've lost our appetite!!
____________________________________________________
9/5/14 For Contest Sponsored by Gail Doyle "On Halloween Night"

Ravaged Raven
On returning from work, I always pass near the cemetery
And always find no life moving there, almost same scenery.
But today was a different day. I stopped my car at the gate
The cawing began, wind whipped, birds arrived in droves.
Big black birds were landing over the place, on the graves.
It seemed to be like a scene out of the movie “The Birds”
Flapping of the wings indicating a big accident to happen.
It reminded me of many superstitions and scores of myths
That surround the crow and its larger cousin, the ravens.
Ravens are associated with death in many of the cultures
As they are found feeding on animals and human remains,
A soothsayer, an omen of death, as a creator and cleanser.
I saw a lady standing near the tombstones looking at horizon
First I thought her to be a Goddess Morrigan of Irish battle
As both crows and ravens were her allies and companions,
Dressed in white but this woman was in black with a pistol.
Will name her Raven, visiting the tomb of the dear one
Who is dead, but once lived, felt dawn and saw sunset
Loved and was loved and now he lies in this cemetery.
As if she got the inner message from her dead one
“To take up the quarrel with the foe and take the revenge.
And will not sleep in peace if you break faith with me”.
As if she has come with a pistol to console her dear one
With salty tears stinging her face, emotions begin to race
I miss you so, why did you have to go when heart is wary.
I have come to you to touch your name engraved in stone
Trying to be strong and brave, to avenge your enemy
And one day in heaven we will be together happy again.
+++
September 26, 2014
Form: Free Verse
Second Place win
Contest: Raven by Kelly Deschler

Leg over leg
I watch
Oh once great majestic man
Stuffed with life and vigor
Stood atop the world
Champion
Once conqueror of mountains
Now crushed by pleasure
Turned animal of desire
Now the running re-claimer
Of past honors
Leg over leg
I watch
One step at a time
His lungs smashing against his insides,
As they fight for air,
Against a nicotine choke hold
Leg over leg
I watch
His feet
They burn,
Sprinting through a Savannah of flames
The weight of his past gluttony slows him down
And chains of sweets
Bind him to a mountain of food;
An animal
Hungry for progress
Leg over leg
I watch
A hurricane of alcoholic despair swells above him
As a downpour of liquor whips his beast of a body
And all that he has drank
Tries to wash him away
Leg over leg
I watch
His vision blurs,
The distant mountains and clouds begin to swirl,
The road ahead bends and buckles,
His legs vanish beneath him
And he greets the floor with open arms
I watch
His heart rages
Trapped in a cage
The animal pushes and pulls aggressively
Painfully biting against his chest
Until it finally becomes quiet
Still
Strangled by the smoke, grease and alcohol
Silencing all who witnessed their reign of terror
His body unmoving
Just inches from the finish line
Still
I watch

Your glorious emerald eyes
Glisten in the moonlight
Glisten in the moonlight
Delight dances in the water
I watch it joyfully
You are set free from the cage...
You're like a dove soaring in the sky
You are the rain...
drizzling down in ecstasy
A hint of ecstasy is shown in your reflection...
When you caress me... I'm relieved...
From the stress that forced me in chains
I knew we'd be on the brighter side of tomorrow
We're glistening in the moonlight
I knew we'd become candles in the heavens above us
We're glistening in the moonlight
For a moment, I felt your presence...your radiant with sympathy
I saw at first glance the dark side of you
Tonight, we'll be together and fly through the horizon
We'll watch the sunset say its last goodbye...
We'll wave a greeting at the moon!
We glisten in the moonlight...
What if I was as handsome as the lion...
Roaring with pride and pure courage
What if we were glistening in the moonlight?
Would it bring health to our bones tonight?
Would it make our heart rejoice and overflow with delight?
Would we be able to survive this horrifying plight?
Would we be shimmering like a candlelight?
We're glistening in the moonlight... (6)
Ohh...yeah...ooh yeah...ooh yeahh...
We reach to the stars and hope we can trace a shooting star
I feel the coolness run down my fingers...
We're glistening in the moonlight
You're the dandelions in the fields
You're the gorgeous view that I marvel at everyday
When you kiss me, I live my dreams
We glisten in the moonlight
In a quick moment, I sense a feeling of endless renewal
I roam inside of your illuminating maze
Glow on... sunshine...
Glow on...sunshine...
Glisten in the moonlight...
Listen to the truth and rub it in
You are ravishing like the sunset
But you're ascending while I'm descending
I feel extremely guilty
I wish I could glisten with you in the moonlight
You're glistening in the moonlight (6)
Ohhh yeahh... oohhh yeahh... ohh yeahh
You're glistening in the moonlight (4)
We go our own way
I wish we can glisten like the moon
Glisten like the sun
There's a dream concealed inside of me...
Reveal your light and pour it upon me
You glisten in the appealing moonlight
While I'm subsiding... you're fulfilling your dreams
Of gliding across the horizon
You're independence... keeps on scorching with satisfaction
While I'm below you...
Your emerald green eyes
Stared me down like a hawk...
Your emerald eyes
Gaze down at me genuinely...
I wish we could flee together in reality...
That could be a possibility
To glisten in the moonlight in glee
We were glistening in the moonlight (3)
But that was only a dream...
I'll pray that it turns into a reality
We were glistening in the moonlight
Now, I've misplaced my delight...
Will I ever experience such a brilliant night?

Itty bitty butt boy
kissing a politician’s ass,
when someone criticizes his hero,
weirdo little butt boy
temporarily stops his lifelong task
and loudly complains
while having a big hissy fit.
When his temper tantrum
at long last finally comes
to a welcomed end,
teenie weenie butt boy
returns to his self-appointed duty.
It is very easy to identify
itty bitty butt boy
even in a large crowd of people
because although his nose is brown,
the tiny little creep’s skin is lily white.

A crowded table, all suspended in shock
The sound of the shot dimming to a ‘knock’
Only silence, except for the marching clock
The weapon still smoking; an anonymous glock
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?
Loud cries arise from the elongated table,
Jack Frost is shocked, the Tooth Fairy unable
To speak whilst Santa is checking the stable
For clues on the erstwhile maidservant Mable
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?
They searched for hours, called in C.S.I,
Panic set in, would the children all cry?
Sandman confirmed the bunny had died
Batman suspected somebody had lied
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?
Guests were quizzed, interrogations began
The mystery unfolded when Santa Claus ran,
Grabbing the pies, he tried escaping in a van
But was stopped in his tracks by superman
SANTA KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY!

I can feel the frigid air bite my lungs
as my shallow breaths try in vain to
soothe and stop the burning pain.
Each struggling footfall could be my last,
yet the mountain taunts me to keep onward.
The snow has consumed my crampon booted feet
with numbness as trembling loins beg my brain for rest.
Heartbeats match the pounding in my head.
I just can’t stop now when so near the summit.
Blinding snow begins to fall as I leave my two
closest friends behind on the promontory.
They plead with me to turn back with them.
All sensibilities have vanished into the whiteness.
“As I feel the snow fly, I will conquer or die”.
Let these words be my epitaph I call to them,
should the mountain claim my sorry soul.
August 10, 2014
For Charlotte Puddifoot's
Dark Poetry Contest

I'm sorry for awl the prayers
Youse darn tootin' sure
we'll be gettin up for church
on a Monday mornin'
Huh dearie?
That brain is so itty bitty
I could pick it up- with
both thumbs
Like the invisible crumbs
laying- on our coats and pegs
ya hear?
Wrap 'em oats around yer legs
real good now
It'll rain
Oh lawd I know it will
everyday of our lives
it be rainin'.

>.<
A night of dark desire and timeless agony
A night of sorrow and everlasting fear
Once pure eyes overnight turn evil
My heart freezes as you near
So close I feel your breath on my skin
The pain and chaos you bring
Sucking life from my world
Hope from my soul
I see you in the shadows
Watching silently.
The sky i see isn't blue anymore
The grass isn't green
My world now cloaked in a dark hue
Down here in the dark
No light to show me guidance
No hope to give me ease
It come's now, the darkness
Suffocating the air
Walls creeping closer
Blinding screams ring through my head
As mercy abandons every thought
Fear seeping through my broken soul
Inside cries of surreal pain claw my flesh
Drowning in my own bitter tears
Knowing I am running out of time
Bringing with it the promise of eternal nightmares
Never waking, forever dreaming, forever screaming..
>.<

May half of your heart be shattered
May some of your times be gone
May love of your life leave you too soon
But fate keeps knitting you another stories to go
There was creed slipped among your tears
Give a little bit sparkle within your weary eyes
You try to seek this true light
It hid behind your timid side
Still in the same dimension you speak your lonesome
The other fingers already steal your mess
Tried to be the first stone of your wall
If only you let them in and be the part of it
Baring the dark days
Parts of your past had been stoned
You seek the twinkle which placed under the skies
And try to find the answer through the gust of wind
Maybe all that you need is to be solid
Or maybe you perched on a wrong book
As you wish life is to be perfect
But the fact a perfection never been too flawless

The Three Days of Darkness, A Poem
It is true this prophecy
That the mightiest things of God come in threes
There were three wise men and three sets of gifts
There were at least three apostles that loved to fish
There are three parts to the Almighty Godhead
And 3 days my Father in the tomb lay dead
It is true
He showed me his beautiful face in peace just lying there
It was a most angelic vision that he delivered to me
He wanted me to see the power of the number three
And that this prophecy is soon to come true
Three days of darkness is surely upon you, he said to me with his gentle voice
Three days of darkness for all of mankind
What will occur during these three days you might ask?
It will be the greatest treasure to the universe
For the Lord God Almighty and his precious Father will walk amongst the earth
They will meet with each and every citizen and give them one final chance
One final chance to see them face to face before the trump shall sound
He will say to his children, I Am the Messiah and I have been found by so many
Won’t you care to join me in my heavenlies?
I am giving you this final chance to make your allegiance to the One True God
It is I, Jesus Christ, that came down from my throne to set all of humanity free
It is I, Jesus Christ, that wants you to know how very sorry I am that the
enemy
Has wreaked such havoc upon this earth
I am coming soon in the clouds
Be thirsty for me
Much calamity is coming to your earth soon
It is only a matter of moments away
Won’t you please come into my presence this day
I am knocking on the door to your heart
And I want to make Myself known to all of mankind
I am giving you all one final chance
When you see the 3 days of darkness upon you
Gather your families and sing praises to me
There will be many evil things lurking about in the darkness
Stay in your homes and stay close to me
Claim the blood of Jesus Christ upon your doorposts
Claim the blood of Jesus Christ upon everyone you know
I am the Lamb that was slain for the sins of the world
This is a poem and this is a prophecy
Listen to the words of our Almighty God
He will use any method to get his words out to the masses
Even a lowly person like me
All hail the power of the name of Jesus Christ!
Written by Gwendolen Rix
8-4-14

A pocket of money he doesn’t have
A bucket of tender and love he can’t buy
Of simple moves he complains
Of simple actions he shouts
If he was my man
I would have never forgiven him
I would have never lasted
But he isn’t and I’m not that great
But I’m still mad and annoyed and broken
Of what he does
Of the craziness that has got into him
And I pray to God
Day by day
That all to be resolved
All that love to be returned
I can’t fool myself
What has gone is to never be replaced
What has lost its spark has gone to waste
But hope is killing us to survive
Begging us to stay
And we listen, we obey
But hope becomes old
And time is thrown to waste
Love and pleasure, respect
Is never to be again in place
Why ?
I ask myself this question everyday
But it seems it has none but one answer
Compulsion….
Compulsion to lose love
Compulsion to bury respect
Compulsion to fight and never be the same
Compulsion to forsake loyalty
Why ?
Because dark is stronger than light
Even if light tries to persuade dark
Dark is too stubborn
It will never obey…

The dilemma of life,
This dazzling snowfall,
The heavenly Humanity,
Reunites with the naked truth,
A bestowed brutal disaster,
Its newest dimension.
While the tortured and emaciated…
Gaze into the decayed,
the deaf human society,
Packs for a never-ending vacation,
And enjoys their full stomach.
And the Spirituality, remains mute.
An incurable disease, hidden beneath!
While the earth is scattered with dead souls…
And sacred red blood, falling as mothers tears,
The illegally ethical politicians,
Claims legitimacy in their acts.
And the true affected maternity, weeps.
Redemption, unknown.

A crazy discovery one buzzing bee
Look beyond the image circling with light
I found a snake entered the garden
crawling with hate in his grass
blocking his strike after a comment
on my personal like a bat coming out of the sun
Shallow dripping poisonous darkness you reek
I can see behind your mask
all words are fake
Rather than honey honesty I am real
an advance in the human knowledge stands over
In false judgement
amazing what happens and when one can see
Smiling in love even the heart is soaked in sunshine
the truth always reveals in Heavenly council
Such sadness weeps in the end
in the all seeing eye of our creator
What it reveals to me bitterness
I know one makes mistakes in life
never a false poet I pen how it draws

All is not well
In this kibbutz
Distant thunder
Suffers, pardons
Armour crumbles
In this temple
Does the keeper's
Soul surrender?
Aren't the roots here
In this dark soil
Drinking like some
Suckers should?
And we will stay
In this dim light
Dragging echoes
Somewhere else
Aiming blame
In others' corners
Dowsing these flames
So we can breathe
And the wonder
In our slumber
Dregs our blood
So sick, so sick

Why?
Why?
Why?
Tell me why?
Tell me why?
Tell me why?
Was it, because I was too nice,
I was too much of a gentleman,
or was just too much to handle?
Was it, because you were young?
Was it, because you couldn't find your heart,
in all that darkness?
Was it, because you just didn't feel the love?
Why?
Why me?
A man like me, deserves no pain,
no heartbreak.
So, why me?
I pray and ask the Gods,
why!
But an unresponsive god never speaks to me.
He sits there and watches... watching what?
Nothing, but a heart being torn to shreds.
Was it, because I was too careful?
Was it, because I loved too much?
Was it, because one half of the heart couldn't fit the whole?
I ask you, because I still love you.
Come to me, my beautiful,
stop this nonsense,
I cannot make you love me,
but I sure can try to show you love.
Do not blink,
do not take a gift sent down from the Gods
for granted.
Appriciate what you have,
appriciate me, because one day,
when you need a shoulder to cry one,
you will not be able to find me, anywhere.
I will be lost,
in a fool's dream of romance and love,
that will never come on my front doorstep.
Still dreaming of the possibilities of you and I.
My heart is with you always,
but I will soon expire,
so do not wait too long.
-10/5/2013

As the night falls,
I look out of my apartment’s window
I come down and walk on the road
Of this dreaded but beautiful place
Thinking about you again and again
Like light you were more than watts
Never diminishing.
Though it fills most of the places
My heart is empty that you used to fill
I hold back the tears and memories
No longer this bridge is empty
My tears have formed a lake
I see a ghostly reflection in it
Of who I once used to be.
I fall softly off the bridge
Drowning in my pool of sorrows.

I grew up physically abused,
with only grandma to hold on to.
I was a frail child confined,
and couldn't understand the pain I was going through.
I roamed!
In my teenage years,
I was rebellious and out of control.
Emotional scars were souvenirs,
and I felt I lost my soul!
I roamed!
Down a long dark path,
I thought my spiritual journey would end.
Listening to a demonic laugh,
I found myself in prison with no friend!
I roamed!
I cried out to God for an answer,
for the death of my grandma was too much!
Spiritual pain ate me away like cancer,
and I felt God had just lost touch!
I roamed!
Down that dark tunnel of tribulation,
I began to see a spark of light.
I continued forward with determination,
with a stronger spiritual appetite!
I roamed!
Inside behind these evil walls,
I constantly fed my hungry mind.
At times I felt so small,
but mentally I was no longer confused!
I roamed!
I was once weak and frail,
and attempted suicide with a knife.
I fought my way out of hell,
because I now valued my life!
I roamed!
My journey began so long ago,
and the strength of my heart continues on.
I survived a spiritual TKO,
emotional scars remain, but insecurities are gone!!
I still continue to roam!
Written for Drake Eszes contest "I, roam"

Born into a life of poverty crime and squalor
where hunger and cold winds bite
and disease is rife
and it was a daily battle to stay alive
and find some food to stay alive.
Uneducated illiterate caught in the poverty trap
drinking polluted water
from the same polluted cholera riddled tap.
An impoverished woman
sells her body for a cheap bottle of Gin
and a lodging for the night
while a pickpocket and mutcher
ever watchful
look for a pocket to alight.
The deafening clunk and clatter
of horses and carts on the cobbled ground
and shouts from the street market traders
echo all around.
Children play and run through the narrow
crowded streets
dressed in rags no shoes upon their feet
The putrid stench from the gutter
and thick choking bellowing
smoke from factories
make one heath and make it hard to breath.
Dilapidated hovels and buildings
covered in black soot
horse manure and raw sewage
under foot.
Beggars with large mournful eyes
reach out pleadingly to the passing gentry
to fill their empty bowls with plenty.
A peeler pins a notice of a forthcoming hanging
at the local Gaol for the few who can read
upon a rusty nail.
A Mother desperate to feed her hungry children
steals a loaf of bread from a market stall
but is soon captured in the sprawl.
The judge sentences her to 10 years
penal servitude far over sea in Botany bay
but she dyes aboard the ship of fever
upon the way.
Her 9 children are sent to the workhouse
for the poor to gain some education
and work hard behind it's hellish door
never to see their Mother or escape poverty
ever more.
Peter Dome.copyright.2012.

“Goober Peas” is southern slang for peanuts.
“Goobers” is southern slang for stupid morons
whose brains are about the size of a peanut.
By definition this means that all of the members
of Al-Qaeda, Boko Haram, Hamas, Hezbollah,
ISIS, the Muslim Brotherhood and the Taliban
are indeed certified goobers – brain dead morons.
They train their sons to grow up and become kill crazy maniacs.
They treat women and girls as second or third class citizens.
They have sex with donkeys, sheep, goats and camels.
We should stop saying that they are from the Middle East
and start saying that they are from Gooberville.
Let all sane human beings support the Jewish people of Israel
in their continuing battle against the Goobers from Gooberville.

GOD!
WHAT AM I?
What Am I? what am i?…
I am less than I hoped to be
Not, what I dreamed to be.
I am
Perfectly flawed
And framed in pain.
I have wasted my flesh
Chasing rashly, fantasies
I wished to posses
Torment is my brother
And loneliness
My closest friend
I am sinking
Deeper and deeper
Near the end
END!
I Want It To End.
The torture,
God! Let it end, let it end…
How long, how long, …
How long will it go on
And it was wrong
So very wrong
Again and again and again.
I am, I am
Perfectly flawed
And framed in pain.

“Hello, sweetie, what’s your name?
Would you like some lollies?
Or my huge brown sugar cane?
Such a nice little girl!
Who’s your daddy
talking to?
What is he doing leaving you to play with yourself?
Are you scared?
Sad?
Lonely?
It’s alright, honey, you’ve got me.
I’ll ride you
to the top of those rainbow hills
where pink unicorns and flying octopuses live.
I’ll take you
where the stars align, and the sky is velvet with glamour.
All my care is you and all my pleasure yours.
Hands,
Put yours in mine
I will show you the world.”
“Sir, you promised me wonders
Yet I’ve felt nothing but pain.
Please send me back home to my family
where we first began.”
“If life were that simple, I wouldn’t have needed you
Should’ve known better than talking to strangers
Oh now you do!
Did it never occur to you that all is just a silly game?
The one that loses is also the one who gained.
Next
to you I lied.
I filled you
with sweet words, and finally made you come.
You’re my one in many conquests,
I your priceless lesson.
Now I’ll make you scream till you pass out,
still no-one will hear your cries.
I might as well kill you.
I might as well die!”

For days we mount white stallion,
going westward,
far from the black stone path
The beast pants,
but carry on
with fire in its eyes
New shoots down-trodden in the channel
I taste the straps on forerunners
deep beyond their dermis,
way pass the dark transgression
we obtained,
yet we hold this sin so dear;
a real peril to the end
I felt wind urging hoofs,
and heard the soil of a mother
calling from soles;
support for imperials
Mattocks pulled new soil
to conceal the cries
If philosophy changes,
there’ll be songs I’ll never sing,
but for now I’ll walk streets eastward,
and survey scuffles
while watching my reflections
on dark footprints
In hope the hoofs are hushed
I’ll lay me down
on fertile bed,
whence I will seep along common path
unto all taste buds
The earth will carry me,
as thick as blood

This is where you opened my naked soul
The dark cold river in within the dead eyed fish
The black swans eying the lonely moon
You rise like a spear clutching a gun... my gun
The gun that burned stoned woods with the heat of my love
The gun that opened the skies and rained it with agony
Agony of a lonesome lover trying to kill the devil within him
Trying to escape the foggy grounds and blooded graves
You walked towards me with soft nude footsteps
My heart doth tumble to the sound of an angel breath
Striking my blind eyes with the sun of your golden heart
The heart that turned stony coffins to gold and black hearts to spring lullabies
You halt and search for air as your eyes turn lavish red
Your lungs feel like stone and rigid rocks but no river there to water the pain
You bend towards me and tears crash on me like hailing grenades
I shout out your name and tell you I'm here...
But I am trapped in the lonesome grounds of the dead Gods
You look at me and strike a smile then cry
You hold up the gun while saying the last good-bye:
"We once were one and now you left me
Left me alone in the dark even when you promised that you won’t
You left a broken soul that no mending can it receive
But you are mine and we are entwined
As I'll crash in the bed of roses over your grave
And fill the earth with my blood...
The blood of your love I will spill it to the ground
The blood that will ingrain trees of love birds
The blood that will tell the dead who we are
The blood that will teach Romeo and Juliet what is love..."
… Bang... I hear the sound of death...
I hear you are lying next to me once again
... But now forever.

Overwhelmed with fear I whispered into the rain
Disarming defenses, Giving in to the gray
Tearing down all of my shelter within my hollowed decay
While this echoing silence gave every tear drop a name
They begin filling the voids with mundane hopes for a change
Heaven will save me from this hell and blue skies will reign
Lazily lay in green grass watching clouds drift away
It's all but a deflated dream now that the colors have changed
My thoughts have become restless noise of uncertainties rearranged
Damning all of my emotions, lies decorated with grace
Now I stand with a hardened heart in the sobering autumn rain
I'm disarmed and defenseless, Giving in to the gray

As a coiled viper strikes
without reason,
unleashing its intense venom
to its unsuspecting prey—
Shock becomes entwined
with pain in waves of desperation.
The viper,
apathetic because of its very nature,
seeks only to serve its own needs
as victims lay waste in the wake of its trails.
You, my darling, are a viper!

Former United States President Jimmy Carter
is living proof that a turd can walk and talk.
He is a very willing butt boy for the terrorist group Hamas.
He is a total disgrace to the human race.
This idiot was actually President.
What the hell were we the voting public thinking?
Carter was the one who put the Demon in the Demoncrat Party.

Perhaps you see me
it may be your gift to see
or merit for hard work
or maybe you paid for it with the lashings you endured
but surely it is now your inescapable wretched curse
as the truth haunts you
but you cannot close your eyes
like me.
It is my fault I am as this
to be as false as I am
false is my name
I cannot love that
I have buried it inside
and run away
because it is too ugly
easier to smile and pretend.
My grandmother saw it in my blackened soul
clever and easy to lie
she hurt me
made me ashamed
and broken
to protect the world and even me
but her tricks did not work
because I have killed too many hearts
and poisoned those that survived
even my own.
I am cold
and it is right I have suffered so
because I lost my heart
and replaced it with a ticking clock
that pretends to beat like a happy butterfly
and tries to convince me I have feelings
that I cannot reach
I am a masquerader of abundant hollow emotions
that laugh and smile and cry
but I never face myself
in the dark alone
because there is nothing to see without a light
my flame has no fuel
unless I suck it from another's bloody neck.
I do not know myself
because I cannot bear to look
but I hate myself as much as you hate me
and you should
because every love I'm given
is less for the world
I am a black hole
I give to get
like Hansel and Gretel's keeper
I only give love
to fatten up my lover
and open her precious tender trusting heart
so that I can consume it in eventual flames
and steal all of their future hope
and faith in humanity.
And I don't know how to stop
and am too afraid to stop myself
with the knife I keep hidden
but never have the courage to use
because I am a dark monster
that pretends to be inviting
like a pristine beach
on a boxing day morning
beckoning humanity
to my shoreline
so I can consume them
with my hungry tsunami
and leave them writhing in pain
with all hope in shambles.
Rescuers arrive in love
one after another
I greet them with open arms
as if I am deserving
needy
blinded behind my veil
pretending to myself until it is too late
and just as they almost open my heart
I swallow them under my next crushing wave.

This night
darkest night
dressed in black
to please your sight.
Dance and drink
just to summon
your approving wink.
Seeking your gratuity
attention from you
to ease my insecurity.
Then the fight begun
blaming each other
pointing fingers at everyone.
You could not let it go
bathing in my pain
wanting you to know
the ache I feel below.
You claimed you loved me
losing my breath
your noose around my neck
sensing my death.
The death of our love
death of affection
gasping for air
doomed in devastation.
Barely alive now
I reminisce
of a love
that was cancerous....

i’m scared.
scared of odd little things:
glass doors,
windows,
leading to the outside world.
paranoia of unexpected guests,
curled under cupboards, and strangers stabbing on sidewalks.
i’m alone in my dark fantasies.
and yet, i’m unafraid.
i crave the reckless life, cheating, binging on drugs and sex and life.
the life where i’m the unknown girl that everyone knows.

"'Cause when your back's against the wall
That's when you show no fear at all
And when you're running out of time
That's when you hitch your star to mine
We won't be leaving by the same road that we came by"
~Keane - My Shadow Lyrics ~

------------------------------------------------------------
There is no celestial place for you to guide my thoughts
Can you not see that I am free from you?
I am a black bird perched high in the treetops
You will hear my crowing and you may hate it
But my dear, you cannot take away my voice!
Yet still, as fire oppresses forests of life,
You can abuse my freedom to find your glory
You may discard these words for your love of gods,
And in so doing you may simply ignore
All the cries that I so passionately utter
But my infectious species will guide your mind straight back
To that once so lonely treetop where you merely glanced
And there will be multitudinous, oppressing thoughts
That shall enslave you and bind you unwillingly
The crows will only grow louder when you turn away—
When you pretend to ignore with your remaining, strangling pride
For my voice is a production sent from above
Dispatched to judge you pitilessly for your swelling lies!
And the choirs of ferocious beaks shall open forever
Harmony and dissonance as one

Drowning in the pool of anguish…oh…oh…
I’m venturing into the forest…and I want to hear the words seep out
Release these aching sorrows…I worry my soul’s drying out…
like a drought…
Drain out the fluids from my heart
It’s gouging me…bruising me to the core…
**chorus**
Embrace the light…embrace the midnight sky…
You fall in my arms – you die so warm
Shed me more sun to lift up my spirits
From the…underground…and release me – I’m breathless
I’m drowning in doubt…ooh… oh…
Remember me…I’m falling…into my swirling fate…hanging on the roots
Strangling my heart…distorting in my veins… I’m bleeding so softly – cut out the wood…
Splintering me…I’m shattering… and I’m falling in the abyss
Bring me more radiance from my candle light
Warp me up in bliss…don’t let the midnight sky…don’t take away my delight
From the…ocean…and save me—save me…oh… oh… I’m failing
*chorus*
I’m drowning in regret…ooh..oh…
Hit the bull’s eye in my heart…embrace the light
And don’t leave me hanging in the abyss…hand me a kite!
Save me before I fall apart…shut out the night
And don’t let the dusk escape us…
I must confess…
I must confess…
I hate to see you abandon the light…
But I’m not the one to save you from the night
Ooh…ohh…
*Chorus*
Splintering lies fill your heart
I want to kiss it goodbye…
But you’ve mastered it like a piece of art
I want to kiss the abyss and die…
Dry… I wanna touch the sky with my whole soul
But I’m failing and the end of time has taken its toll
Tainted sorrow…swims around me…I dwell where the waters depart
But the anguish still swarms in my heart…
I’m failing…my heart stops beating
And my desires are fleeting
From my grasp
And the monsters laugh at me…as I fall…
*chorus*
Embrace the midnight sky…catch me…catch me…
As I fall in death’s arms…I die so cold
And your heart is made of gold
Untangle the darkness & take away the nightmares
Answer our prayers & block out the night
Erase the heartaches & wipe away our tears
Unravel Your words of life & delight

The sky is grey then yet
the sun’s rays still prevail
in shining light on to colour
deprived land.
The trees have shed their leaves,
they litter the dark ground almost
hiding a dark secret of what is
hidden beneath.
The wind blows scattering leaves
making them swirl on the ground
covered in a sea of brown.
Butterflies are my only company
in this gloomy and sombre land
they provide the only colour
alighting the memories of more
happier times;
no sound emits for no animal walks
on this land except myself.
My footsteps are muffled by the dead
leaves, they softly crunch under
my delicate feet.
My silk dress twirls in the wind as
I walk, my exposed skin becomes red
by the cold air making goosebumps
thrive upon my soft silken skin.
My thoughts are sad for I remember
the days when the land flourished
dominated by an ocean of colour then
yet here I stand in a ghostly land
with nothing but the wind and a few
beautiful butterflies for company
for the autumn mist has engulfed
the essence of colour and life.

I think I died a thousand times
We just sat and drank this wine:
blackberry, black cherry, dark chocolate blend
I felt like we were sitting in some type of sunken blend;
a fabric that was soften and mesh in dyes to look like green
then you started talking and the evening seemed to scheme
like we were playing tic-tac-toe and you knew that trick with the double-
WhOa tHaT WiNe jUst StArTs tO HiT..is ThAt tHrEe BoTtLeS RoLlInG dOwN ThE MiSt?
. . .
. .
I wonder how It WOULD be like to KISS THESE talking LIPS
Is it easy if I WANT to just place MY HANDS ON HER grey stretch skirt covered hips
...She's still talking....simply talking...and I am mesmerized...
I can see myself, pour myself, in the reflection of her eyes
And I notice, I can't help myself to get nearer, so much nearer to her face
And I see her notice, but she has no motive, to push or place a chase
And then so close, I stop what I chose, but she press yes on the button stall
. .
. . .
We just sat and drank this wine:
blackberry, black cherry, dark chocolate blend
I can see myself, pour myself, in the reflection of her eyes
...She's still talking...simply talking...and I am mesmerized...
I think I died a thousand times

SING IT TO “Danny Boy”
Verse
Oh what a joke
This beer is full of water
Tastes not like beer
But something very strange
So landlord dear do tell us what you diiid
Make sure you never dooooo it again
Refrain
From pub to pub we taste the watered beer
But no one cares its Friiiday - lets go
Time to relax with all your friends around you
Oh Braiiiins dark* I dooooo love you so
Verse
It’s Friday night and we are feeling hungry
One place to go to ease our appetite
Its Chippy Alley*** in the city centre
Brains dark*, Clarks pies**, will soon put it right
Refrain
From pub to pub we taste the watered beer
But no one cares Its Friiiday lets go
Time to relax with all your friends around you
Oh Braaains Dark I dooooo love you so
• Brains Dark Beer - brewed in Cardiff very strong taste (hops).
** Clarks Pies - Famous meat pies made in Cardiff. If your from Cardiff and not at
home you will yearn for both.
*** Chippy Alley side street in city centre, mostly chip shops, used when
international rugby is in town

A stranger once offered me
A cup of hot chocolate.
He looked awfully familiar
So, smiling, I accepted it
As I gaze at the light drizzle outside.
But the boiling brew
Warmed my body not
Nor it unfroze my cold, lonely heart.
It was molten live coals. Furiously it burnt
On my tender pink.
Wincing, I
Drew back but, oh!
Too late.
Rich, milky, burnt-sienna
Had scalded pale pink
So badly it left a lasting
Sting
And an icy-cold heart.
I take no more hot chocolate
From any stranger ever since.
Tongues and lips heal
But not hearts.
Mine never thaws.
And what stings more
Than the bitter, dark, hell-brewed chocolate,
Bubbling-hot and vicious on dear lips,
Is how I now see that
Everyone is a stranger to
Me.

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi
the self-appointed leader of the
Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant
jihadist group who declared
portions of Syria and Iraq
to be an Islamic Caliphate
under his personal command
was not birthed from a woman’s womb.
He is some slothful bipedal afterbirth slime
from a strange sexual encounter
between Adolf Hitler and Josef Stalin
in Hell itself and then he was dumped on earth
to be raised by a wandering herd of feral pigs.
He is evil incarnate in a subhuman form.
He is the demon child of the Devil.
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi is Satan’s Spawn.

A single kiss from thy lovely lips,
so sweet and so divine,
yet I taste posion upon your tongue.
Your beauty so glorious,
like a blooming rose so beautiful,
yet, why do mine eyes go blind
in the sight that you walk along with another?
Yes you, walk with another,
arm under arm,
lips touching lips in romantic kisses,
it makes my blood boil,
for mine lips are dry.
For mine eyes have seen your glory,
yet no one here listens to my story.
You are evil, yes you are,
don't try to deny,
Listen to a man of experience,
you might as well save some expense.
I write of our long romantic walks
we took together, under the shade of olive trees,
how we went apple picking in autumn time,
and made love in the foyer.
Nomore of that sweet and passionate love,
nomore silent kisses in the night,
when the wind blows hard against the branches,
that tape violently on my windowpane.
Nomore somber tears shed, when you got sick,
and nomore warm embraces when you shed tears of betrayal.
Betrayal now is a game played by a fool,
such as I,
to think I'd have a happy life with you?
Huh, only a fool would think such a thing,
but now I sit, looking at the foyer,
where we once made sweet, passionate love,
nomore will that foyer be filled with exotic pleasure.
Nomore will you be filled with smiles and exotic pleasure.
I've done my job, as a good man shall do,
now pack your things and get of my stage,
the spotlight yawns for anew,
and the audience grows tired and restless of you.
Now I live life anew,
you too shall see life in new eyes,
walking hand and hand with the blond, blue eyed devil
you call your own.
Shall he take one kiss from your lips,
and die of the posion he tastes on your tongue,
shall he go blind, when he sees your true, black beauty?
He will see the ugly soul, covered up by white rags,
and cheap makeup,
and then he will come to me,
and shake my hand in condolence
and say, "You were right!"
Now you are all alone,
looking for another, as you did many times before,
Now you are alone, walking an open road,
spying on another,
fear of being alone.
Now, you see when you play games with a good man's emotions,
don't try it,
because a good man is not meant to be toyed with.

They praise me like a saint,
But I am a sinner;
They don't know the man they see.
I am an addict.
Broken eyes to pornography,
Only Jesus can set me free.
Only by His death on the cross
And the grace of His Father's love
Am I able to be set free.
With God as The Light,
The One and Only Light,
The Only Hope in sight,
Will I be set free.
I am free.

First of all my pens crazy
You want to know where she’s been lately?
She’s being held hostage by a man who loves Jason Voorhees and who’s as insane as Slim Shady
My pen vs whatever weapon you want to bring baby
You better pray, I’m a predator
Get offended by what I say, I’m not regular
Think of the most offensive thing to say to an editor
I dare you to try and censor me
I used to act sensibly
But I removed all of the sense in me
I’m so far ahead my shadow is resenting me
Some people will be offended by what I say in this verse
I knew Hip-Hop as dead when I saw Kanye West wearing a skirt
He may aswell of went all the way & wore Kim Kardashian panties and handbag
What’s happened to today’s rappers it’s too damn sad
I know Tupac and Biggie are turning in their grave
I put all of my hurting on the page
Walking my path and searching for a place
But I’m not begging god to let me find it
They laughed cause I’m dyslexic, 2 fingers up but I’m not peace signing
This is not for the weak minded
I’m not normal please get away fast
Not trying to fit in so stay back
Is he allowed to say that?
Quit being so sensitive
They’re just words
Here let me add a few cuss words
Taking my life is the only way you can be preventing it
Till then I’ll say what I like
The day I hold my tongue, will be the day that I die
When I’m sleeping in a ditch
Cut my tongue out and send it to Michelle Keegan as a gift
Hopefully this is some romantic gesture she’s never seen
Cause this is the most thoughtful for a girl I’ve ever been
My minds broke
I apologise if there’s any typos
I wrote this with my eyes closed
I’ll keep writing until the day Santa is proved to be real
Because Tupac left his genius to me in his will

There is a demon in my closet and it is safe to say
I have kept him there safely, each and every day
Asking about his words, I thought I heard him pray
He laughed openly stateing he was always hearing me play
I followed, I listened I leaned over to his ways
It turns out he's here over an angel and a wish of keeping me gay
Saintan is forever listening to what becomes my fate
The doors still closed as softly as that horrid divorced decay
But he was not wearing my brand, a mark of forever may it stand
He had choose to turn the other cheek, to find a higher point of understanding
Something more suitable than just a standard branding
A mark of a book, a devils open handing
A demon to help me through troubles and fears
A someone there when all I have left is openly flowing tears
He jesters, he peers, he jokes, he steers
But I think my favorite time is where leers

It‘s alive!
A life form
Thriving on hatred
Reaped from societies
Greatest blunder
Like lighting
Follows thunder
We are following our ancestors
Reproducing civilization
Mistake
Disregard the fact
That we are all human
our blood is red
I smirk when I’m contented
And shed tears when I’m poignant
We are all equal
cease this schism
And trounce racism

"He Never Felt It".
I walk lost
without my soul
I will find it
searching
alone
he never
felt it
Today I feel
unnatural
ugly
lost my beauty
I'll look
weeping
he never
felt it.
Now I am in need
of somebody
wipe away
one tear
out of billions
he never
felt it.
Isolation from love
is slowing down
towards him
my depth got
sick lonely
he never
felt it.
I searched why
explanation
was satisfactory
I am out
of love
He never
felt it.
Confusion without
love
erupted
in
tremendous
pain
attacked
my heart
he never
felt it.
Therese Bacha
24 June 2013

Scent of men and sweat pervade this little space
away from vast expanse of exercise machines at this gym.
Here they strain beneath laden bars
or lift and lower black and silver weights held in their hands.
A delicious black-haired male with slim yet sturdy legs
exposes muscles which tense as he steadily pumps iron.
Beautiful and intense dark orbs peer into the mirror
at the biceps of his own taut and tawny arms.
Now he lies upon his back and hoists a bar.
The sound of his laborious exhalations permeates the room.
He doesn’t notice the pair of paler eyes on him
(I also watch the mirror. . . but more discreetly).
My softer respirations match his rhythm.
Then. . . with his final reps come virile groans.
Inside my head. . . I moan and I see myself
above his rippled abdomen and heaving chest,
pressed against his sweet, dark perspiring skin.
The fragrance of my lingering Taboo
mingles with his musk.
I see him glance my way, and I avert my eyes.
If he takes to older women as well as to the younger girls
and if he fancies ones like me - robust and voluptuous -
not just the females delicate and slender as reeds ,
perhaps he is breathing in the essence that is me,
and for that one moment in time. . . I’m the fantasy.
For Cyndi MACMILLAN'S "MY SPICE BOX: SENSUAL POETRY. ADULTS ONLY.Poetry Contest"

A spiral curl upon her brow,
She can't recall how it all began
She can't recall how it came to this
No names are shared, he doesn't care
He doesn't ask...........she doesn't tell
She doesn't tell.........he doesn't ask
She promises herself,
this will be the last
A small tattoo, a trailing rose
It wanders down, beneath her clothes
She dims the light
One look, he falls
into the spell, she has composed
She knows the score....from those before
Beneath the trellis of a smile
Cold fingers grope, to touch the thorns
and there is born, a heart of stone
Without a word, her taste runs cold
His lust is hot......her time is bought
Her lot in life, tomorrow's scorn
Her honey, wild, once laced with gold
Until the taste was tainted cold
In lonely rooms, pink roses slept
Where bedside shadows paid the rent
The tears she wept so long ago
Now shuttered tight, where secrets hide
Against the dark, against the tide
All shame has learned to shut an eye
A child, a lily in the bud
Has never known the trace of love
All fear is gone, but not forgot
Redemption, now, it matters not
Where ecstasy, is never sought
A tear upon the lash won’t fall
The garland once upon her dress
Is now tattooed upon her breast
His urgent thrust, to her is death
He pants one breath, then takes a rest
She doesn't speak.......he falls asleep
He didn't ask..............she didn't tell
She promises, he'll be the last
No questions asked
______________________________________________
For Charlotte's Contest, Erotic Scorchers: 11/27/13

Meddlesome acknowledgement was my gift to many
I wondered where the nutrients were coming from
I was absorbing your words, parched by my own dimming light-years
There I was stunned by the legion of black-faced martyrs
Exasperation of the undeniable misunderstanding of every conceivable word
Left me with another path onto death
And not nearly dying, but regenerating in technological, factorial woe
Demon thoughts squeezed bile from the brim of subconscious drivel
Accelerating the ghouls from the gull of my esophagus
I was held down from the dreams of the fortnight
From words of architecture ascending from the brims of the archangels
Eyes remained closed
And I felt the actual descent of my downfall
I did not open my eyes at all
I did not mean to pry into your life, oh beautiful soul
Please accept my gift today
My fierce gaze into your lavishing grail
Led me to accept and love where I often fail
I am no longer smothered in your intricate designs
Though I am surely small to you
Though I feel only a fraction of a fool
I am the hidden spark under the timbers of lies
I am the hidden spark under the timbers of lies

It was dark and dreary, and the dawn had not yet
begun to break, as I walked down the steps
to fetch the paper while my family slept.
A hint of a breeze wafted through the trees,
dawn's early light was not yet in sight.
A slight movement appeared from the corner of my eye,
something stirred, a slight crunching-like sound was all I heard.
A cat, a small animal of sorts, hard to see,
moving closer it became clear,
another of those nocturnal mammals, armored carriers
of that age old scourge was rooting by my tree.
Back in the house and out again with light and rifle
I set out to prove I was not someone with whom to be trifled.
A shot in the dark went over his head,
caused a sudden jerk out of the bed,
he turned and glared with steely eyes
and lowered his armored head,
and charged straight at me
as though to say, 'you're going to be dead'.
With gravel flying up the drive he came
like an armored freight train.
A look in the eye such as I have never seen
determined to chase me from the scene.
The crack of the rifle, again..and then again -
and he lay where he fell...with no other sound to tell.
No more will this creature from the Mesolithic age
destroy my lawn, but if truth be known;
where there is one......another on his own, soon will come.

His wild heartbeats were losing their proud strength
Shuddering at the netherworld that blinked and mocked
A few lucid moments before the darkness closed in
Agony dragged and stretched to a yawning limbo
His over-sized dark head dazed and delirious
Fought proudly to stand on those skeletal shoulders
Weighed down, weary and on his starving fours
The little boy dragged on while the gods were still busy
The patient vulture edged closer to death
And the five-year-old braved his last battle
Willing himself to keep moving, to breathe
If he didn’t want that big bird to come closer!
That was a life who hadn’t known comforts or gods
A living face that had flies eating at his eyes
Fighting to survive another day without food
Thirsting for water he had never seen from source
Miseries piling high in Mother Earth’s records
Where little lives are pawned to obscure realities
Prayers and hopes get jilted at prayer houses
And justice just remains a word romanced…

While Watching the Dark Clouds
While watching the sky and its amazing dark clouds,
I was lost for a while in the diffusing Sunlight,
Coming from behind the engulfed Sun,
Penetrating it somewhere, without much success,
However, silently the Sun kept on trying and moving,
In spite of all the dark clouds,
Hovering all around it and were trying to fear the Sun,
By their shapes and dark sings.
But the clouds could not block the movements of the Sun,
And its life giving light for more than
Few moments.
It assured me once again in my faith,
That darkness can never be a
A permanent fate.
Sooner or later the light brings alive the life,
Even if, it is in extreme darkness.
Ravindra
Posted on 04th Jan. 2011
Photo by Ravindra K Kapoor
http://poetrypub.ning.com/photo/watching-the-dark-couds-054?context=user

I see you.
I can bore into your soul,
making you feel smaller than ever before.
I will be your terror!
Chaining you to your worst fear,
Me.
Can you hear the drums pounding loud and hard in your ears?
That’s the fear, making your blood pound faster and faster.
I laugh at your trust and your fear.
You think you can take me on?
Step up, you’re in for a ride.
Pain returned tenfold, its time you learned.
My anger is ruthless, I have no mercy.
Beg your useless god.
You are beyond his merciful help,
while I have you chained in my evil clutches.
I rule this warped reality,
now you will see who I really am.
Don’t try to side step me.
Scream and no one hears you, you’re pitiful.
Nothing will make me relent.
I have been pushed too far.
I will mark you while I have you chained,
my whip of hate will be lashed across your back.
Feel the sting?
I can see the blood coming to the surface of your skin,
with every lash.
This makes me smile,
to see your pain.
You will fall to your knees, begging for no more.
You will feel me scorch you with my white hot rage.
There is no forgiveness in my world.
I branded your flesh;
you belong to none other than me.
GypsyofEssence

I am told that there was once peace on earth,
but that was well before my time
and I will soon be turning sixty seven.
I feel sorry for the youngsters of today
and all of those who are yet to be born
because I do not foresee the situation getting any better.
I hope and pray that I am wrong in my assessment,
but history points towards an awfully violent future
for all of the coming generations.

President Obama constantly bad mouths
his political opponents here in the United States
while he continues to suck up to the
Cuban communists and the Iranian fascists.
Unfortunately the pundits were correct:
“One cannot underestimate the intelligence
of the average American voter.”

He felt he possessed a high tolerance
Living side by side
With those he abhorred
Tolerating the smells
The sounds
Of the lesser men
He was of a proud race
Blonde hair blue eyes
Future master of the world
Biding his time
Tolerating those lesser men
Smiling
Imagining
The day when he would rule
Take what should already be his
Fortunately he was a tolerant man
Tolerance does of course have it's limits
It could only last for so long
He held onto his glimmer of hope
Those lesser men hung with rope
One day their fat turned into soap
When the time comes a joyous parade
Within a mass grave their bodies laid
But for now he bides his time
With tolerance, he toasts with wine
The visions in his head are so sublime
He wants what's yours, he says "It's mein".
A sad chapter in human history, sadly these men still walk amongst us.
Read my other poem I wrote called "Tolerence" to know my thoughts".

Wake Up My Children! Wake Up!
A creature of many faces stalks you,
A human chameleon devoid of soul.
He hides not in the shadowy corner,
But among you, under the unwary eye.
Do not be fooled by this great pretender;
A white hat may adorn his head,
But blackness fills his vacant heart.
Be wise my children! Beware!
He's the crown prince of trickery.
He's the grand master of disguise.
This creature can masquerade in godly robes
while writhing painfully under their holiness.
Evil can spout prophetic words like a tribune
while the lie festers under his tongue.
He's a true disciple of the damned.
Wake up my children! Wake up!
Do not be mesmerized by this alluring creature.
With his apparent straight talk and honesty
He can make you a mindless believer.
But he's a liar and a charlatan.
He hides behind a wall of illusion,
Preying on the fears of the ignorant,
And captivating the ears of the innocent.

She was very beautiful;
she looked like a goddess.
Her eyes were emerald,
lips were red and sweet;
but her shadow was absent!
her image was absent in the mirror!
Not many people who knew the REAL her,
except for her victims who turned out to be
like her; immortal at the expense of warm, fresh human blood.
Her heart pulsated in excitement,
as her fangs sunk into a man's neck;
a man who had fallen trap to her sensual nature.
A beautiful girl she was,
but her past so dark, such that the darkness' texture could be felt!

The world is our rival
Jealous of our ways
Slowly corrupting the mind
Drawing out the suffering
With venomous tricks
Until we lie in the gutters of society
With wounds of doubt and self loathing
Severed pride spills lies
Hidden as truth
As we grasp for something real
We find only a gun
A single round stalks its chamber
And beckons to us
The temptation all too great
Without a second thought
The pain subsides
Replaced with emptiness
The world takes the lead again
Sheaths its poisoned blade
Looks back at the corpse-strewn track
And frowns in confusion
It wonders if it played a part
But shrugs, sympathizes
And continues on its path

Where are the animal rights people
when it comes to the raghead nazis
of the Islamic State in Syria and Iraq?
No donkey, goat or sheep is safe
from mass rape from these loathsome
devil worshipping rat bastards.
Now that there are over thirty thousand
of these murdering brain dead dumb asses
running around in the desert over there
they have branched out to raping other
four legged creatures including
horses, cows, dogs, cats and even pigs.
Speak up for the persecuted animals
of Syria and Iraq all you bleeding hearts
from the free world nations of planet earth.

a young girl weeping in the corner
darkness grows deep inside her heart like a cancer
sunken eyes, blood exploding from her nose
angry purple bruises on her thin arms
no one can see her
no one to help her
despair and hopelessness fill her up
he has set a dangerous precedent creating this mess
too many souls are affected by domestic violence
worn down
beaten down
with no help in sight
the menace he displays behind closed doors
shows his cowardly depth
his warped and cruel means
she prays for silence
with arms wrapped around her battered body
sobs locked inside
there will be no spark of light at sunrise
to give her relief from this night of terror
the fear gives a dull ache as she perceives
an unimaginable ending

Trees shed
Their Autumn Leaves.
Autumn Leaves-
That fall,
That twirl
And then embrace the ground.
Autumn Leaves-
That flood
The pathways I tread
And the horizon I see.
Amidst them, I halt
Amongst them, I sit,
Stare and admire
Them as they shower from trees.
I listen to them,
As they rustle,
And cuddle
In the soothing autumn breeze.
Wondrous it is to listen
To the tales they tell,
Tales spelled in their toungless accents
Tales that are the soul of each of those
Falling, twirling, rustling
Autumn Leaves.

Time forever going forward into the snow
time wasted
seconds, hours spun out of fingertips
forever like snow into the dark
light falling on snow
dancing, glowing for one miraculous second
then drops away into the darkness behind
and see beautifull blooming things
flowers spinninglike the snowflakes
soaring totally free
stars streaking through the night
seconds, minutes, days
buoyed up in a bright place
the only light in a dark world
looks like a falling star
time and space blast away
like a universe forever expanding forward
leaving only darkness
darkness and the snow
This is found poetry from words I Chose out of the book Before I Fall by Lauren Oliver

Yesterday she left , warm and sunny ,all pleasant and funny
Spend some time with me she said, for soon I will leave
I lingered many months, my season ends , I will come again so don’t bereave
Gone are the long summer evenings full of crickets ,cicadas and fireflies flickering light,
Blinking their secret codes, mysterious and magic , in plain sight
Marking time with the pale yellow moon passing thru starry fields of dark summer nights
Fall sweeps in, proclaiming loud and clear, the death of summer is now so near
The seeds run full nourishing the land , acorns dropping ,and everything ripens,
Soon the trees will change their skin and like magic a new life appears
From vibrant green to orange, red and yellow
Long slow and rolling , dark green and pale ,the waves tamed and mellow, carry their lament
Carrying a sharp edge the cold ,damp wind brings sudden intent
Grey banks of clouds, long and low stretch to the horizon with their rainy content
Soon Jackets and jeans ,sweatshirts and sleeves will take their rightful place ,
Layer upon layer will I make of bare legs and chests that were openly seen
The deserted beaches , falling skies, pale and pink, all proclaim the long rest is now at hand
Painted pumpkins all in a row dot the land with orange and black
Mister owl haunts the night in his favorite wood on wing and nightcap
While lingering over bare earth and frosted fields of yellow corn and golden ripe wheat
Couples and lonely people ,walking silently, hand in hand, hurry back to their retreat
And sailboats huddle close together on dry land almost within reach and wistfully watch the sea
And I will sit near a warm glowing fire, book in one hand, sipping hot cocoa or tea

The dark skies are coming,
Dark clouds are appearing,
The wind is gusting,
Trees are fronting,
We are shunning,
We go running...
The dark skies are coming,
Rains are blossoming,
Nature is bumping,
They go cunning,
The sky is drumming,
Forest are burning,
We run intending...
Dark skies are coming,
Gusts are interfering,
Nature is in confusion,
Humanity getting in pandemonium,
Minds in disorder,
Intention unbecoming...
Dark skies are coming,
Darkness is rising,
Sun is fading,
It is causing an uprising,
It keeps arising,
We keep striving...
Dark skies are coming,
Darkness is blinding,
Gusts keep arriving,
Deception and treachery are conniving,
Pain gets agonizing,
We go crying,
You go regreting...
The dark skies are coming,
Mountains are crumbling,
Clounds are thundering,
Soil is spoiling,
Bodies are breaking,
Hearts are bleeding,
Birds are flocking,
Fishes are emerging,
Somethings are dying,
Humanity is surviving,
Safety is distrusted,
Most things are doubted,
Everything is happening,
The dark forthcomings are near...

"The Monster in my Head"
Do you know what it's like
to hear voices at night?
The kind that keep you awake.
You may fall asleep,
yet it's anything but peaceful
as the screams penetrate into dreams.
The thoughts and fears you keep inside
come alive and refuse to leave,
as they voice what you've tried so hard to hide.
Pills will not help; alcohol only delays
There is no escape from the voice;
Listening is no longer a choice.
I just want rest, a moment of peace.
Silence the voices.
Save me, please.

~*~
Cautiously I tread down a path paved of nightmares
Dark trees with gnarled branches
Marked with loneliness
Stained with loss
Misery hangs in the air
Despair trails down imaginary forest walls
Walls from which cries for help seep
Bottomless crevices of broken dreams
Abraded emotions
Poisoned souls
Frightening images paralyze
Petrified eternally, mentally, physically
Sounds of crushed aspirations whisper like an evil cry
Hopes and dreams turn to dust,desecrated
Envy runs as thick as poison
Eating away at logic
Sensibility all but gone
Drowning in abhorrent past
Still haunting traversly hanging overhead
No sign of depreciation in sight
Decayed by wear and tear
Frayed edges barely hanging on
Shadows of raven colored streaks reach out
Wanting to strip all promises
Silent prayers to the heavens in protest and anguish
Screams that resemble wounded animal
Howls of suffering rise through frigid winds
Plaguing anticipation as you echo into the night
Heart beating wildly pounding like a fist
Screaming through leaves
Awaiting reply
Answered by silence...
Feeling your cold, dead eyes
Following me, do I run? can I hide?
Like a disease slowly it begins to decompose
Rotting like wood aged over time
Till its all but gone...
~*~

orange scattered skies
an awaited breeze
watching the birds
form tree to trees
a thunder clap
we pause..listen..scatter
distance dusk howling sounds
then the unmistakable movement
it slashes, ripping, gurgling moans
just a victim of the game
on top of the food chain
as I walk I cast a shadow long
blend in café ridden side walks
it’s moves are precise
just another prey in life
on top of the food chain
when you move you leave it clues
no doubt it’s on top of you
your eyes dart back and forth
moving from side to side
15 minutes of fame
My life on top of the food chain

Tying knots
Mental state
Who is hot?
Let us rate
Mental games
Teenage life
Goals to aim
Who holds the knife
Broken thoughts
Broken hearts
Connect the dots
Life just starts
You existed
But now you're gone
Life's so twisted
Should've held on

The winds of Winter wait,
Whispering to me of the approaching future,
But still far off, biding their time
Until this span of light and warmth has lasted out its stay.
Meantime, I engage myself in taking stock;
Compiling the days that define myself to myself
Enlarging the catalog so far as I can,
Building up a narrative.
So many memories
Like fireflies in a Summer's night
Flash through the dark spaces of my mind.
Childhood: Flash
Youth: Flash
Young Parenthood: Flash
Empty Nest: Flash.
Family, friends, events
Joys, sorrows, beginnings, endings -
All make their flickering passages;
All paint their images onto me
The particles dance and shift
Cells die to be replaced
The face in the mirror becomes my father's
Molecule by molecule
With each passing instant.
The particles dance and shift
Moving back towards the dark unknown
From which they came,
Yet somehow in the midst of it
The I that was
And am
And shall be
Remains to watch the long parade unfold.
And that parade, banal and fantastic,
Marches past that inside window where I watch to see myself pass by,
As some newer self shall do the same through all tomorrows
Until the day when all the marching stops for me -
And then, my fellow marchers,
O my many, varied Loves,
On that last Winter's day,
Where will we be,
Where will we be?
What musics shall we hear?
What wonders might we see?

Paradise regained and paradise lost
Winged angels and horned demons clash in ferocious, eternal battle
In an ever-expanding, contracting, and pulsating universe
Silvery bolts of primeval lightning
Ominous sonic booms of thunder
As rabid gods furiously join in the wild feeding frenzy
Fleeting glimpses of sweet heaven and a red, fiery hell
Then absolute, perfect nothingness
Make no mistake – at noon there shall be total darkness.

As the sun sets
and the twilight comes out,
as the birds and squrriels are no where in sight.
As the whores and pimps sit on street corners,
waiting for street lights to turn from green to red.
As cadillacs stop and roll their windows down.
I can her the faint cry deep in the darkness,
of dirty gutters and dark, dead end alleyways,
I hear the faint tears fall and hit concrete pavement.
I feel the faint cries of whores,
I hear the sound of backhand hitting face
and brused tissue and broken noses are everywhere.
And the somber tears fall onto pillow cases,
and white motel bedsheets run red with blood
and cheap Italian wine.
And you can her the poet over the radio,
reading his own work for the one millionth time
and you can hear his soul slowly wanting to die.
He drowns himself in smoke and alcohol
the whore takes her pay, or spends a night in a jail cell,
the pimp nowhere to be found,
with a shiny blade stuck deep in his gut.
And the somber tears fall gently on the concrete pavement,
the floors of a jail cell,
tears on the pillow case and tears on a lonesome stage.
Tears never present, but are seen by many,
pain aches and pain takes away,
and I pour one more drink for the whore.
She takes me away,
and I caught her salty, somber tear,
and she crawled into my warm embrace.
I was the one who stuck the blade in the gut of that pimp,
who broke her nose and made her bleed,
with a cowardess and souless backhand.
I walk into the moonlight,
hearing the somber tears all around me,
crash violently to the concrete pavement.
The Earth rumbles and erupts with these tears,
that are shead for fellow Men, and Women and Children,
but we all look at ourselves and smile.
Happy we don't pay rent,
happy we don't have cancer,
happy we aren't six feet under;
But we still all cry,
Why?
Somber tears all fall in one big wave
crashing violently on the concrete pavement.
Now the red light turns green,
and the traffic moves along,
the whore is still at her corner,
the pimp still with the blade in his gut.

6.
Miracles and Miseries
The world resolved itself back into focus
As I lay amid the swarm of monitors
Still gulping the sword that brought me breath.
The worst now past
Many small miseries remained,
Chief among them the continuing mystery
Of my flooded, struggling lungs.
Finally I breathe well enough for the sword to be removed,
But the tests go on and on
The birth of each day bearing forth
Its own fresh indignity.
They give up guessing and haul me down again
To be opened anew and read for signs.
On the day this is done
The invisible agents of death outside
Decide to mock their pursuers
By leaving a tarot card at that day's shooting site.
They chose the Death card, of course
Revealing how little those
Who choose to play God games really know
About the mystical.
Dreaming of omnipotence through dealing death
The unseen assassins miss their own meaning;
For this card signals change, the ending of present things.
They have unwittingly declared their game will soon be over,
Predicting their own demise.
Meanwhile the doctors make their own spread of me
And come up blank again.
Once more I return to I.C.U.,
Held together with staples.
Once more the little agonies ensue:
The sitting, the turning, the testing.
By night they come for my blood.
By day they come for tests.
Always, in the background, the quiet moanings
Of we, the damned, condemned to medical Limbo
Roll on with the blind passage of hours and days.
The English nurse comes, all brightness and bubble
To heave my fragile self about;
She's a welcome break in the monotony
As my sustainers come and go.
Again the busy bedside conferences
And again the final admission
That all their probings have led down blind alleys.
A last-ditch effort is finally proposed:
Direct drainage of the drowning lungs.
To them this seems as a grasping at straws,
But to me it seems the one sensible solution,
And I look forward to it eagerly.
My inner mantra of "This too shall pass"
Is wearing thin.
Like a Christian martyr of old,
They pierce my back with their lance,
And the sea within that is drowning me
Finds its way out.
As the noxious waters within rush out,
Air surges into my grateful lungs.
From this moment, recovery becomes the new reality.
As I recover,
Indiscretion leads to capture
Of the unseen terrormakers.
To the astonishment of all,
They prove to be a dignified looking black man
And his enthralled protege' -
No prior convictions, no history of trouble
Attached to them at all.
This is how our modern Destroyers come calling.
Well dressed, well spoken models of propriety.

People were
Disconnected
From the flow of
Years gone by.
Nothing is reflected.
The tower of this land
Collapses,
Leaving nothing left in it’s place,
It’s gone now,
Time relapses.
This body is
Frayed and distorted,
But without a mind and consciousness,
It still moves on.
Time is reloaded.
The beating and breathing of this heart,
Is destroyed again, now
Evanescence.
A conscious mind is gone,
Anyway, anyhow.
The chains
Are gone,
No longer holding it,
The Dream will go
Until dawn.
Eyes misjudge
This fleeting dream,
But it still
Looks for the “Dreamscape”,
But with nothing to redeem.
I am Fantasy,
I am a dream.
But my Dreamscape
Cannot be destroyed,
I will shout and scream.
Notice
Me,
Now
See

Depression
3 o’clock in the morning…
The sounds of bed frames hitting drywall,
The sounds of Chopin and Coltrane played
With a hint of sadness in tone.
Sounds of whores and pimps arguing;
“Where is the money, you whore?!”
“I don’t have the money!”
A sound of a slap to the face
A big hand crushing bone,
Blood everywhere
Red streaks on white walls.
The sound of drunks walking gloomy streets,
Police and ambulance rush down burned out streets
Sirens wailing, crying out!
A child, six years old
Crying, “Momma! Momma!”
Shedding tears over his dying mother, lost her soul to the
Crack pipe.
Rest In Peace.
A sound of a .357 magnum revolver click
And a gunshot shakes the nerves of many,
And for a moment the sweet and peaceful silence.
“Dispatch, suicide on 46th street Hollywood Boulevard, Send the Corner. Over.”
Then the darkness sails over
And the entire cities are showered with tears from the heavens,
But no one weeps,
Not a single soul…
-10/2/13-

On the night of the full moon,
a new world was to be created;
the Pyramids’ tops would face a distant star,
in the Sirius constellation.
The darkness of slumber in consciousness
would be replaced with awakened consciousness;
the invisible shadow of Divinity never leaving us.
Our DNA would all parallel our ancient visitors;
the ancient Nile dwellers called gods and goddesses.
The Pyramids would unlock the secret code of the universe,
which is dispersed all over in space, but cannot be seen……
Date: 28/03/2014

For a long time there I stood;
Yet another entrance to hell.
Though I already understood,
There's this feeling I can't tell.
Scent of sin present in the air
Reminder of what I must do.
Life has not been all that fair,
Still, I wish today is untrue.
The door to hell is inviting;
Smiling, out the devil came.
His touch had been inciting
But I felt nothing but shame.
There I was, in a hotel room;
Sold both my body and soul.
Flower that will never bloom;
Never again to be put whole.
By him I let myself get tainted;
And I will go to hell and back,
To keep my beloved child sated.
There will be no turning back.
*For the "In A Hotel Room" contest
*Written: February 12, 2013

Catching me out and truly unexpected
Flashbacks that only bring tears to mind
Children so powerless, no happiness to see
Left in the darkness to fear night and sleep
Nowhere to run, no one to care for them
Cold blooded man with no heart or love
Chillies for breakfast more punishment for tea
Strappings and cruelty, their harsh reality
Forced to watch and too scared to cry
Strength inside but fear in our eyes,
Never show weakness, take it on the chin
Secretly hoping he pays for his sins
So much fear, sadness and guilt
Fear of not standing up to his build
Sadness for the horrible things indured
Guilt I wear for not making this stop
Life has many challenges, we all know
I should have dealt with mine years ago
Instead I just pushed it so far below
Locked deep out of sight, out of mind
Letting this all impact on my life
Feelings subtle in the background
Slowly eating at my heart and soul
Preventing me from being whole
So this is a new promise to myself
Finally remove it all from the shelf
No more will it comfortably be dormant
Day by day I will sweep it all out
This is a journey....'A Road about to be driven'

Maybe the guff was empty—Cancer full moon eclipse
Left field call on the black wall phone
faint cry from the distant end
spoke with throat lump of capital
disaster and a troddened womans most
everydom—lost before found—somehow Jan
knew and put forth a celestial no comment with
I-hope-I-am-wrong-love gesture for the
love torn bull awaiting a cancerfold friend
offspring no spring-perhaps next spring. Anna
soild Anna so poised of classic stock sometimes
never bending to an antiflexible Taurus mood
was caught in a never place, why of questions-
depleted character strikes. Will the blood
hordes rally for the fallen “fetalrade” and
heal the internal emohurt temperature
inferno of unknown bliss. Does it ever come
at the right instant? Like where’s a cop when
you really need one—maybe 7-11 therapy would
bring solice and peace. Forgive the forgiver
and pass your sense into another ability
Keep your mind and your soul for the little
lost egg. I don’t know know or could never compromise
no more of a complex juxtaposition of life
and death than that of biobeings so
closely connected that share the same
existance, one within-one yet
percent infinity bonded in a tidewater
liquid symbiosis that no manbeing in time
past or future will hope to match let alone
entertain. Be that as it may, you’ve felt the
sting of life and the creation of flesh for a brief
moment of time in time and time is that holder of all
events we hope to achieve—your time in both
will come to be—you will share
and create from within, and not waiver
about the fallbacks we run down for
no explanations from anyone will suffice
or reason to make a whole sense of such
a fathomless inconsistency. I felt your
loss deep in my knees and thoughts flew
to your little soul upstairs. There are words
and there are no words—my deepest senses
to you and Dana—I know it will happen for you
as all things come to pass for those deserving dave collins

There was a dense fog upon the land
not a fit night for animal nor man...
the moon did change its silvery view
replacing it now was a blood red hue....
There just beyond thicket of the marsh road
lies the endless tar pits of bubbling black
It has been told that should one fall in it ~
There would definitely be no turning back....
Oh, how the populace did dread passing the pits
for all knew what dwelled within it...
Goblins dared not cross over it... and the vampire bats
would not go anywhere near it...
Even the witches feared this Halloween night,
as they packed their caldrons and potions...
preparing their broomsticks readying for flight...
too escape the diabolical one, known as Dark Blight.
Alley cats sat on fences and drank black draught, tonight
thence, sang they a harrowing song full of fright...
As the draught turned their multi-colored coats
to the colors of pitch black midnight...
The domesticated dogs remembered
their kindred brother wolves....
Soon they gave chase to lost souls,
while howling at the man in the moon...
So it began... with large boney fingers liken to ashy white talons
Dark Blight emerged scatching its way to the surface... its massive black shoulders
bearing a skull revealing eyes which burned
liken to red hot coals with yellow pupils set a glow...
With a sinister grin he did appear from within the pitch black pits
petagrams and talismans were etched upon his sinewy back....
such slimy black skin mirroring centuries of horrors from many Halloweens past.
Oh, indeed there would be no rest for the weary wanderers this night...
Unless, a champion should appear in time to put things a right....
until then Dark Blight would continue to pass through the night; slithering upon his
belly ~
all the while leaving a dark trail as red as raspberry jelly...
Even the Ghouls knew and would stir clear of the sweet sticky pools
The Gnomes stood careful guard over homes,
whilst watching over all babes and fools....
For such tender flesh made the Dark Blight's lips drool...
The crows cawed thrice and the hoot owls hid their eyes....
Oh, the night was nothing nice, as blood chilled like ice....
Who would put a stop too the dastardly Blight...?

Turn round, turn round
And face your fears
Turn round see who you really are
Turn round and follow the compass rose
Turn round and see the Lord
He was there all the time
But I couldn’t see
Immersed in all that dark stuff
Turn round and see
The opposite of dark is light
But there is no reason to live in shadows
When the light of the Lord shines
Shine, on, shine on believers all to see
Shine on me, oh light of the Lord
Shine on me, and that’s why
I love all you who believe.

My dark skin is beautiful
My nappy hair is styled with care
That is my view of natural features
Blessed I am, to share
Time travel to another place
Kings and queens have a similar face
So why I am forced to face degrading images
skin-bleached relatives and mind-shackled people
who think that their dark skin, nappy hair
is something to be traded
that it is jaded
Confused thoughts
Lead people to self hatred
not only for themselves
but for anyone wearing the darkening pigment
And why the confusion?
Because we of dark complexion
and finely curled hair
must be daft, be fool
be anything but intellectual and schooled
Don't you see how we have been fooled?..
Take a look
Look deep in the mirror
See what you uncover
Beneath bewildered stares at your hair
Turnt up noses at your clothes
Beneath all the physical woes
See the King, the Queen
ready, waiting to claim the throne

It swallows everything in its path,
even man's breath! As it slowly moving along the streets,
only mourns and screams you hear; deaths happen
during victim's broad vision. Survivors of the traumatic ordeals
claim that fading, whitish figures tear flesh with their long,
crooked nails; in some cases they slit victims' throats - the slitting
has an eerie, audible voice. Until now, exorcists and mediums avoid
this town.....

This night fate had been decided in the moonlight
As the bread winner had answered to the doomed call-
The compulsory striker had kicked to his goal post.
This sure-bet would never miss the net.
Ere his 'lift-off', our old man had whispered
Love words, and sang spiritual songs to our souls.
Not knowing that this full moonlight night trace will gulp his gullet
And he will never babel any more on this land he keep.
Home couldn't do anything but to wonder about
And soak the floor with our tears.
What an unbelievable seizure of the soul!
Do this means our man had parted this world
And we would see him no more until the final world?
This moon mustn't go in
Before his body 's laid (down)to rest
As his faith demanded.
Should this be a bright moonlight night to spare?
Note;
***sure-bet, compulsory striker- death
***home- family
***our man, old man- Elder

I did it again; I need forgiven.
Will He still forgive me even though I've fallen before?
I've fallen into these same sins countless times before;
I still haven't learned my lesson.
I am an ignorant hypocrite.
Am I still forgiven?

4.
The Slippage
All through the night of the day when the madness began
Fever comes to visit me.
In bed immobile,
Sheets dampen beneath my filthy hair
Shivering/Burning Shivering/Burning
The night creeps on towards dawn
And no sleep preceeds it.
When at last it comes,
It marks the point at which
Breathing becomes my sole occupation
Tests define my days
I and the medical machines
Begin to merge.
New lines are attached daily;
Monitors, nutrients, fluids, blood.
In all directions they flow from me
Until my metal caretakers and I are so interconnected
That spongebathing becomes choreography.
Meanwhile, outside
Invisible killers roam at will,
Dealing death and wounds
Then moving on, like clouds across the sun.
A seige mentality settles over the entire area
The shadow of sudden, random death passes over all.
My personal shadow lies upon my lungs,
Quietly, steadily, pressing away my breath.
The tests go on and on and on
Blood is drawn 'til veins begin collapsing
I feel like a prisoner of the Inquisition,
Sustained solely by the spirit of those
Good fortune makes my own:
Wife, Children, Parents, Friends
- All the best reasons, in short, to live -
Never fail to help bear me up,
Feeding me the honor of their concern.
They fan me when I burn,
Warm me as I shake with cold,
Remind me of all the good
Awaiting my return.
Then at last there fell the evil day
When they moved me back to the higher ward,
The place from which one usually does not return,
Chills washing me like Arctic waters,
Shaking like an epileptic
Fighting the mounting panic
As I gasp shallow breaths
Like a fish hauled aground.
Since that time I've seen it claimed
That suffocation brings the kindest death.
Whoever wrote that
Had a strange view of kindness.
There followed a hard night of fear and confusion
That passed into a dawn I never saw nor felt.
At some undefined hour they wheel me back to Intensive,
As Gulliver's god slides off the wall ....
And everything comes to full stop.

The crocodiles teeth,
They n'awed into me
And tore me up limb by limb,
But I am not dead, nor alive
I'm a vision, a spiritual surprise!
A woman who bleeds from the eyes
For justice, and not to be criticized!
Do you understand that
even ghosts have to be remembered?
To be Recognised!

SHACKLES
The loneliness wraps around me
Shackles me with its weight
My blood runs cold within me
I fight to stay afloat
The black dark clouds, they chase me
And try to take my soul
The tears flow freely from me
And I feel I lose control
In all the worlds emotions
This is the hardest one
For me to shake each morning
When I feel I want be done
The hours of night do leave me
And early morning calls
Memories they do haunt me
And my world sits still for all
The being that is in me
Is crying to be found
The feelings of denial
They hang onto their ground
The snakes of darkness strike me
And fill me with their fire
Their poison seeps within me
And makes my body cry
The sun outside is sleeping
In my half of the world
And deep within me stays there
I never hear it call.
One day Ill go and find it
Wherever it may be
In this world or the next one
Ill feel it shine on me
The emotions that are in me
They rage and ramp and fall
They crush my being beneath me
And never know your call
That dark black hole is yonder
Is lonely just like me
We may find peace together
And earth can blanket me
Oh god, this lonely rotten heart
It feels intensively
So much pain it harbours there
Why can’t I just be free
I want to be away from here
And step outside of me
If only that were possible
Just like a break at sea
Its alright now, I’m calming
I know what this does mean
I know that deep inside of me
I’ve lived a thousand beings
Another life, if I should leave
Is just another dream
Another wasted life to me
To live emotionally.

Tucked into their beds.
The room dark as can be.
Than a light is seen though
the window.
Than comes another, and another.
Out of bed they run to see the lights
from the fireflies out their windows.
Hundreds flying, lighting the night.
Out side they go with open jars in
hand, they catch one, two, three until
the jar can't hold any more.
Lids go on and back to bed they go.
The room which had been so dark
is now lite up from the many fire
flies they had caught outside that
night.

I lay sleeping with eyes wide open,
I lay sleeping with dreams that have no meaning,
I lay sleeping with nothing to dream about.
I lay sleeping with no care and sleep with eyes blind,
I lay sleeping, there with my eyes wide open.
Seeing the dark change from dark to black.
There is no moon, there is no sky
just purple strokes of paint in the sky.
Take that morning dew smell and close your blind eyes.
Smell the morning, that smell that clicks in your mind.
The smell of childhood dreams,
that as an adult never came true.
Sleeping bare in the nude with your eyes wide open.
Thinking of her, as she is five thousand miles away from you.
Wanting to love and hold her, but no use in crying.
Sleeping their with blind eyes in the dark that dances in the light.
Your lamplight turned down low,
as life trickeles down in its nightgown and yawns for sweet slumber.
Tired from longs days, and sometimes long nights,
wanting to curel in bed and close its blind eyes.
Dusk will soon peek its head through the blinds
and awake life to a new dawn.
She sleeps in the morning, and walks at night.
When he sleeps at night, and walks with a bare nude heart in the morning.
Life climbs over yellow mountains,
and meets her fellow compainion
a handsome fellow with broud shoulders and blessed with an ego
as I sleep there with my eyes wide open.
As I sleep with my eyes blind to what life has intented for me,
and as I raise to walk the lone streets at the break of the dew covered lawn
at the first sweet smells of dawn,
I can see life go on with the handsome man
and I blind and wanting to go to bed.
I dream of dreams that have no meaning
Gardens of cluelessness and raging emotions
tare me down and I am confused on which way to go.
Do I stay here and dream away, blind and half awake
as life slaps me across my broad cheek?
Or shall I walk on with life hand and hand
and regain my vision of the world,
Start to sleep with dreams that make sense
and dreams that are made of gold and have no end?
Dream of fancy dreams that show love and happy endings
I would love that, and I would love to walk with life,
but she is out of my leauge.
And my bed is so cozy and I feel like sleeping.
So I shall sleep on more restless night chashing life down.
I lay sleeping with my eyes wide open.
I lay sleeping with dreams that have no meaning.
I lay sleeping waiting for life to come back from the mountains
and lay beside me.
I lay sleeping with hope of regaining hope and salvage
what is left of my spirit at hand.

When chaos brings civilization to its knees
From world wide pandemic critical disease
Or when a tsunami consumes everything beyond the shores
Swallowing the landscape and changing life as we know
Earthquakes shake the very foundation of this world
Or an astroid penetrates the cradle of birth
Bring us back to the primitive unleashing the truth
From the umbilical chord we are more ferocious than rabid wolves
And we will kill fellow man just to survive
Or just for the desire of taking ones life
What is compassion but a dead corpse on the road
Adrenalized by fear no time for sorrows
No need to worry about a world war zombie apocalypse
We're already flesh eating monsters wearing dead skin
Most people panic when they lose internet or their lights
Autonomy is just a word most people can no longer define
And your money isnt worth *****so forget trying to buy
Your way out of cleansing while you run out of time
So learn to die well and hold your loved ones real tight
As you pray that your death will let you ascend to new heights
Beans, bullets, and bandaids are all that I'll need
To keep population zero from taking over me
**** being hopeful could we really be so naive
To think that in these days we could some how find peace
When our mother earth gets restless and releases all of her worst
The only thing more destructive is our human nature

A Chance Encounter
A chance encounter the other day
Got me chatting to a stranger
Just for some time to pass away.
He was very well groomed, very smart.
Spoke well too, seemed a decent sort.
I told him a little tale
I had learned whilst at work.
Outside a building that’s up for sale
Close to the centre of the town
A queue of people gathered.
Old clothes, hand me downs.
Inside people of good heart and souls
Were behind tables long.
And a kind of soup was poured into bowls.
A slice of bread was added to each one poured.
As the hungry-eyed came through the door.
As each one passed a thank you was heard.
Grateful for the meal today.
A simple reply least we can do.
All was silent no complaints from the poor.
Till a young voice said, ‘Please Mummy I want more.’
I sat back in my chair waiting for a reply.
The guy opposite gave a big sigh.
He said, ‘Things were tough in those days
Very hard for the poor in the Victorian Age.
They were ignored, did not count,
How could others treat them like that?’
No-one should be without the means I say,
To feed and clothe their children today.
I looked at him and shook my head.
My dear friend you misunderstand
The tale was not yesteryear or a foreign land.
I visited a local food bank the day before last.
And like you I was taken aback.
Unless with my eyes I had seen,
The myth about scroungers I would still believe.
Some get the dregs, others get the cream.
This is Great Britain in 2013.
But the people of our Nation are strong
In times of strife they speak as one.
‘We are mighty as Caesar, mighty as Rome.’
‘ NI CARBORUNDUM BASTARDORUM’

Dubieties engulf all around
As the brume in the dawn
Behold plants seeking strength
In this warm cuddling cloud
_________________________________
Songs soon sing from the sky
The common notes that play
When it’s about to drop wet
Upon human’s bower.
It’s wonted (by this time) to descry
Dark clouds being deserted
By its everyday residents.
In the mood of the inclement
It’s sparse to hear
Any row from the firmament
Other than the loyal sound
Of the saturated pattering
From the blue yonder.

WARPED AND TWISTED
HARSH WORDS, VIOLENT BLOWS
HIDDEN SECRECTS THAT NO ONE KNOWS
EYES ARE OPEN, HANDS ARE FISTED
DEEP INSIDE I’M WARPED
I AM TWISTED
SO MANY TRICKS, SO MANY LIES
TOO MANY WHENS, TOO MANY WHYS
NOBODY IS SPECIAL, NOBODY IS GIFTED
JUST WARPED AND TWISTED
SLEEPING WHILE AWAKE
CHOKING ON MY DREAMS
LISTENING LOUDLY TO
A SILENT SCREAM
CALL ON MY MIND
THE NUMBER IS UNLISTED
LOST IN SOMEONE SO
WARPED, SO TWISTED
DOWN ON MY KNEES
ALIVE BUT DEAD
LOOK AT THE INVISIBLE BLOOD
I HAVE SHED
I’M NOT DEAD
MY MIND JUST HAS DRIFTED
DO NOT EXPECT TOO MUCH
TOO MUCH FROM ME
FOR I AM WARPED AND TWISTED
BURNT OUT, WASTED
TODAY, IS YESTERDAY’S TOMORROW
THE SUN DIED OUT, THE ASHES SIFTED
YET I AM STILL HERE
WARPED AND TWISTED
(c)GDC2014

You saunter through the double doors
Head held high
Chest puffed out
Putting on airs
You think you’re so clever, so deceiving
Showing up baring the most ornate mask
But I see right through
The mask that you wear tonight
You think it will conceal
You think just tonight
In this hour
You can be somebody else
But you’re dancing with the Belle of the Ball
This is MY Masquerade
And this is the 147th event
You just don’t recognize me
Because I wear a different mask each time
Your mask is cheap material
Sequins missing, feathers askew
Such feeble attempts
I smell your bravado
Putrid and reeking, stinking up the air
But I see right through
I’ve donned masks my whole life
That’s why I am the bearer of this sash
That you see around my neck
“Strongest Person I Know”
But I allow no one to gaze under the mask
Sure I play the Belle oh so well
But if you all saw beneath
Saw WHY I’ve had to wear masks
You’d strip me of my title
You’d rip off my sash
Break the pearls from my neck
You’d run for the door tonight
Quicker than Cinderella at the stroke of midnight
That’s the beauty of a Masquerade
You can pretend to be something you’re not
When one guise becomes worn
When it loses its sparkle
It’s glamour and charm
That first catches your eye
Well it’s quite alright
Because I have a treasure trove
BURSTING with masks
Grab another and keep dancing
Twirling the night away
Never skipping a beat
But when the music finally comes to an end
When the door closes and the final guest departs
Empty wine glasses are seen scattered all around
The only sound is the echo of my heels
When the confetti lies lifeless on the floor
That’s when I remove my mask
Exhausted, worn and weary
When I gladly, almost desperately
Take off my tattered sash
And throw it beneath my feet
Because I’m not resilient and strong now
I feel weak, frail and reclusive in my realm
That’s when the tears start to brim
That’s when I wish someone else held the title
So stripped and naked
Alone to clean up the mess
Everyone else has left behind
But there’s no one to there to pick up the sash
Just me and the sound of my tears
Echoing as they hit the floor
Almost fearfully I pick up the sash
Dust off the confetti
Smooth out the wrinkles
Before placing it back around my neck
As I throw my shoulders back
Standing taller than ever
Wiping away tears that no one saw
I walk back to my trunk
My trunk of the most decorative
Ornate, obscuring masks
Finding another to wear
As I prepare for the next façade
The next Masquerade

IT’S THE PERIOD OF THE DARK AGES WITH STREETS WITHOUT FACES
BOOKS WITHOUT PRINTINGS AND PRINTS WITHOUT PAGES
IMPRISONED WITHOUT CAGES AND PAID THE PRICE WITHOUT WAGES
IT’S THE PERIOD OF THE DARK
SO LET ME TAKE THE STAGE AND LET MY WORDS BE ENRAGED
THAT BABYLON, STAGGER ON ONE FOOT, IS TRIPPING
ON ITS OWN IMMORALITY, PRACTICALLY EVIL
KILLING ITS OWN PEOPLE, MAKING THEM THINK
AS IF, THEY WERE NOT EQUAL. THIS IS NO SEQUEL
AS ACID RAIN KILLS THE NATURAL TERRAIN
CAUSING SANITY TO GO DOWN THE DRAIN
MENTAL PAIN TRAINING THE BRAIN TO WITH STAIN
THIS OPEN BOOK PHILOSOPHY, CONSCIOUSLY AND MENTALLY
BEING A MINORITY TO LIFE. L. I. F. E.:
LIVING IN FEAR ETERNALLY
I HOPE YOU ARE HEARING ME
SOON BREATHING WILL BE AN ACCESSORY OR A COMMODITY
PAID FINANCIALLY BEING DEATH TO THE ECONOMY
THE TRUTH IS NOW BEING TELEVISED
AS THE IGNORANT TURNING WISE
CHILDREN ARE TELLING PARENTS THEIR DEMISE
PEOPLE DON’T REALIZE
WHAT THEY’RE WORTH OR OTHERWISE
OR HAS MAN’S EGO, GONE MAMMOTH SIZE?
FIND THE LOGICAL TIES:
THAT THE DEF COULD ALWAYS HEAR
WHAT THE BLIND CAN ENVISION
READING PAGES WITHOUT PRINTING
LIKE RELIGION:
THE BLIND TEACHING THE BLIND IN HOPE THEY WILL SEE
BUT THIS DOES NOT GO DOWN LOGICALLY
BECAUSE WE LIVE IN TIMES OF DEMONSTRATION
BUT NOTHING IS PERFORMED
IN TIMES OF RECREATION BUT WE’VE NEVER REFORMED
IN TIMES OF INFORMATION BUT WE ARE NEVER INFORMED
THAT THESE ARE THE LAST STAGES
WHERE OUR MINDS ARE PRISON CAGES
AND DEATH’S RAGE IS ARE PAID IN WAGES
THAT IS WHY I SAY:
IT’S THE PERIOD OF THE DARK AGES WITH STREETS WITHOUT FACES
BOOKS WITHOUT PRINTINGS AND PRINTS WITHOUT PAGES
IMPRISONED WITHOUT CAGES AND PAID THE PRICE WITHOUT WAGES
IT’S THE PERIOD OF THE TRUE DARK AGES

What I do to deserve this heartbreak,
this horrid and unnatural pain,
this cleche of events that strike me simultaneously
as the time ticks away,
and as the grinning faces pierce a whole through my soul
and my heart turns pale and slowly beats.
My heart is torn in two,
and I cannot find the doctors to stich me up.
I ask an old man,
how does love go about,
he smaked me in the face and went on.
The pain and the sorrow,
it is too much to feel,
too much to gain in one serving,
When I eat, I taste posion, not passion,
familiar faces turn grey, with ruby eyes and sharp fangs
they hiss at me, like a cat to a mouse.
I don't understand why I deserve this.
I am a good man,
who loves with open arms and a big heart.
With every hug I give,
I recieve a knife of betrayal in my back,
I feel the blood ooze from my open wounds,
suicidal tendencies roll through my mine,
but I quickly throw them out,
because Mama didn't raise no coward.
I see the blow, I clench my fists
and swing away,
God cries wanting to stop this madness,
Death laughs and soon joins in,
people join in and punch away.
I lay there on the concret blood everywhere,
my heart torn out of my chest,
each with a thousand knives stabbed in it,
as it slowly beats,
I lay their on the pavement,
looking up to the heavenly skies,
and as it starts to rain droplets of hope
I ask myself,
What did I do to deserve this?
Then, I shall close my eyes
and rest for awhile.
-9/23/13-
Inspired by all the betrayal and heartbreak I've faced, by so many cowards who didn't want to recieve my love. People I had thought who were my friends, came with invitations of humiliation and hate, and now I see who my real friends are; this pen and paper... Have a good day.
P.S. No one should ever be shown this much betrayal and heartbreak. I wouldn't even wish it on my worst enemy. Have a good day!

I've glanced at heaven.
I've walked through hell.
I wish on stars and dandelions
I crave for fantasies reality cannot satiate
At night I talk to the moon and sing to the stars
I walk on clouds and speak to whispers
I follow faeries to far off places
Where a bleeding moon hangs from the sky
Where I run along in meadows of black and white roses.
Smiling as the thorns lacerate me.
Dancing with red eyed creatures
Listening to whispers in the wind.
With this feeling of finally belonging.
Being finally at peace...
Safe inside, this world in my mind
Lost between reality and time

I look out my window
No longer white and fluffy
The snow has turned a sickly gray
Much like my mood towards this season of death
Tired of dark clouds and cold winds
The birds are wise to abandon this desolate place
I dream of sunshine and blue sky
Running barefoot across green grass
Smelling the fresh scent of spring breezes
Lazy days of summer accompanied by young lovers
For now I am a prisoner in a cold land
Wrapped in my blanket staring out at the gray
Nothing seems to warm the coldness that has invaded my soul
Old man winter has stolen another day
I wait and I wait
Time seems to move in reverse
Is there any escape?
Yes
I go to my computer
Warm weather awaits me
Just a click a way
Visions of spring dance in my head
I can cheat on winter
Escape cold fingers
I can fly away to some exotic warm land
Run through Sun drenched waves
Drink umbrella drinks
I can follow those clever birds
I long for this escape
Just four hours away
I arrive at the airport bags in hand
Feeling oppromistic
Then comes a storm
Old man winter refuses to release his icy grip
I look out the airport window
The snow covered runway is pure white
All flights cancelled
A block of ice where my heart used to be
How I long for spring
Winter Be Gone Contest
Poem written January 27th for your contest.

I cannot get into heaven
God I have tried!
Suicide is a double edge sword
Especially when you survive!
Walking the streets at night
Dazed and confused
Longing to be loved
Wondering...
When is Mum, coming for me?
"Does she still love me?"
"Does she still care?"
"Does she still think of me?"
"Does she wonder, where I am?"
I want her to come find me
I want her to say she 'loves me’
I want her to comfort me
I want her to take me home
And keep me safe
And not forget hat I exist
Like the way she treats me now
I wish God
Could make my Mum
Magically appear
Making this hellish nightmare
On the street
Disappear!
“Send my Mum please!”
So, all this can end!
Before this last ray of hope
Diminishes for good!
I don’t want to become
The walking dead
Forever forgotten as if
I was never born!
For this is the cruel, harsh reality
Of living life, feeling unloved
Uncared for, abandoned,
Left to fend for my own
A dangerous killer inside me
Eating away, at my soul
Something, no one can see
As I suffer in silence
My insides crippling!
Lost, alone and frightened
Weeping on a dirty
Graffiti park bench
Dirty tears
Rolling down my cheeks
Stuffing newspapers under my jumper
To keep myself warm
“What am I going to do?”
“Will I make it through the night?”
“Will I get raped and beaten?”
"Will I be left for dead?”
“Will I survive
To see another day?
“Is my life worth living?”
Please God, I beg of you
Have mercy now
Please show me the way!

5.
The In-Between
There, in the In-Between,
No trumpets sound
No beings clad in gold celestial fire
Arrive as guides to the heart's desire,
Only silence falls
Throughout the velvet deep profound.
At the In-Between,
No Savior calls
For there is naught but nothingness;
An emptiness entire.
Strangely, I sensed myself suspended
In a nevertime of not-quite-being.
Such was the In-Between, where now I wandered.
As though it had always been,
I felt myself afloat, adrift
Upon some frigid river full of ice
Which had no source and knew no end,
That traveled 'round and 'round and back again upon itself
Rising and falling over distant hills and bearing me with it
- Or rather, what was left of me -
Along in its meaningless, endless circuit.
Nor dark nor light intruded.
Vision compassed only what might be envisioned,
Images forming and fading
Within the little cavern of my skull.
Voices without discernable words.
Murmmerings within the waters.
Something like a sword
Was lodged down my throat.
I gagged upon it, over and over;
Unseen hands would withdraw it, then shove it down again.
The main thought flickering in my head
As I lay in this place
Was of how I seemed to have become some frail remnant
Of whatever I once was.
No longer did I have that sense of flesh
Containing the shape of me,
Nor the feel of muscle, nor the bone beneath.
I felt I had somehow been rendered
Some modern scientific wonder,
A creature flayed alive yet living
In some embryonic form, possessed of such shape as it could claim
By virtue of a remaining mass of nervous tissue;
A minimalist miracle
Preserved in a nutrient bath by the power and will
Of a conclave of white smocked High Priests of medicine.
Strangest of all, perhaps
Was that this perception of my fate
Occasioned in me not horror,
But rather a regretful sadness.
"What will they tell my wife?" I sighed in my mind.
Yet, by slow degrees the feel of the outward world
Stole in upon my little hell of shapelessness.
The throbbing thing I seemed to have become
Refleshed itself somehow,
Though the sword in its throat remained.
Distant voices resolved into speech again,
And as they did I felt myself begin moving again
'Round and 'round as before, still on circuit
But no longer floating on ice.
Now, instead, I seemed lain on some unseen track
Circling through a low-roofed sandstone cavern.
When I passed the band of light
That marked the faroff entrance of this cave,
I would hear the voice of that Boy Who Would Be Our King
Exhorting the Disunited Nations
To join his crusade to punish his chosen scapegoat
For an evil he had helped loose upon the world.
The long silences that followed his harangues
Revealed the skepticism of his audience.
I could sense that a long roll call of the dead
Would soon be scrolling past the world's collective eyes,
Be his call accepted or no;
This was for show, decisions had already been made.
I regained perception of how dangerous things were becoming out there,
Out there where I'd lost my way, to stumble into this place,
How long ago I could no longer recall.
I knew this to be its nature, though
And as well that this was where I belonged, Out There
Where the only source of peace or peace of mind
Was the hope we wove between ourselves
With threads of unstoppable possibilities
The human way spins for itself.
I knew where I belonged, and reached out for it.
I came back to be within
The folds of all I love
To seek the mystic shine of life
Expressed in friends, relations, wife
Awaiting my return.
I began to climb Above
Back to where all hopes begin
To where desires brightly burn
Until their ash shines whiter than
The purer feathers of the dove.

It's always hardest, when there is no one to talk to-
When I dial your number, and it just rings and rings
Until the dreaded "voice mail" picks up.
For just an instant, when there is that brief crackle and "click"-
My hopes skyrocket that you have picked up the phone and answered, when I needed it most, the moment I am most frantic...
But when, in reality, it's just that pre-recorded message that I've heard a million times before; how I loath it
And I feel my heart sinking, like there are anchors tied all around it, dragging it into the depths of my stomach!
Where are you? Can you not feel my desperation through the infinite channels of the universe, or are they clogged and busy, too?
Don't you know that I need you, perhaps now, more than ever?
I know you're at that fancy French restaurant you're always talking about, drinking fine wine and eating escargot, possibly dancing the night away.
While I am here, all alone, eating my own heart out for supper.
All I need, all I want, is a compassionate voice on the other end of the line, talking me down off the ledge once again.
Don't you know I've had too much to drink; that I am listening to sad songs and thinking about doing it again- that awful thing which leaves me so terribly scarred when I wake from my stupor? The cuts. You know, those things you hate to see marring my arms.
But I'll have to resort to self-will and self-control, of which I have so very little...
I may or may not make it through another night of melancholy and self-loathing.
Please, for the love of God, pick up the damn phone!
*Any Poem Goes Contest Entry
~JustThatArchaicPoet

There is a high, high cliff, just waiting for someone to come and climb,
But what you must go through is rather tragic, so you must figure it out.
I’ll let you pass through this gate and hopefully find out what is missing in it,
what it means,
I won’t give a hint or a word of it, so don’t pout.
Your first stop is a place of nothing but fog, and a fast current of icy water
passes through it.
Only pure of heart and those who understand can step on the stones and walk
the distance to anew,
When you pass through the fog, hopefully you haven’t tripped yet, you’ll find
such a beautiful place,
But to the only few.
The mountain awaits for your footprints, only to blow them away,
There is a flower on the highest tip of the monument in the sky,
“It’s too high, but I’m sure you know that.” Most say,
But to those who are strong of imagination, just fly.
Pick the flower, and you’ll finally see the path of your journey alone, a long
white hall.
On the walls, there are pictures of your past times, retelling all the good
memories,
But if you are truly pure, you’ll see the way you made it here, and you’ll know,
You’re dead, and this long journey ends when you sit in the golden room with
two chairs.
You’re almost there, just a little further and you’ll find paradise, I’m not lying.
If you see doors leading away from this golden room, congratulations, you
have done well.
For you, there will be a never ending paradise, a Dreamscape awaiting your
presence,
And your life stories, people can retell.
“You have done well alone,
You must come and find me on your own.”

A night full of nightmares
and suicidal tendencies,
feeling pain rush, like tidal waves
crushing me and blood boiling
anger wishes and takes the best of me;
but can I heal my own heartbreak?
Will I ever find love again?
See the angel of death come to me,
smiles and says come with me.
Oh, Wake me, when the morning comes,
so I can show evil the light.
Feelings eternal and fragile,
she walks some lonesome highway
travelled by the ones who fall in love.
She a grand fool, who takes life for
granted,
wake her with the morning light
and shine down rays of goodness and
pride
and show her the path that leads back to
me.
Wake me when the morning comes,
place her upon my doorstep
and a smile upon her loving face,
I'm not ready to move on just yet.
I don't want anymore nightmares
and nightly visits from the black angels.
I don't want to see blue eyed Death,
with his grinning skull and black robe.
I want to see the sunshine break through
my window
and I want to hear the birds sing love
songs,
and the trees dancing to the wind's sweet
melody.
I want to awake to her sweet and glorious
beauty.
Wake me, when the morning comes,
when I can open my eyes to anew
and see life in a new day,
and live life in a new way.
-10/5/2013-

The family had just moved into an old castle in Scotland;
mother, father and their only daughter, Emmie, that they loved so deeply.
Emmie was only 12 years old, and so innocent and beautiful.
One night, she was woken up by a dripping sound;
an echoing sound of water drops in a sink;
rhythmic and terrifying.
She sat on her bed, and suddenly appeared a free floating arc of strange light.
It's that time of year again: Halloween night.
Doors flew open and shut; strange voices and footsteps started.
She was so frightened, that she almost threw up.
Emmie made the sign of the cross, and plunged into a thicket of thorny wild roses.
Terrified, excited and ready to run out of the house in 20 seconds,
she overheard whispering words: "All beauty must die."
The voice was so deathly, that it sent chills through her spine.
It did not make it any better that it sounded too close to her ears.
Her nightdress being torn by rose thorns like papers in a paper shredder,
she ran as fast as she could; not back to the old castle,
but away from the creepy voice, and strange events
in the old castle.
Exhausted, she searched for a place she could find rest
"All beauty must die" the voice visited
her unceremoniously once more. "What do you want from me?
Is it wrong to be born beautiful? "
she asked, wondering where she got her courage from.
The energy to scream or run departed her,
the moment she saw a woman dressed in white,
levitating in the air, and moving towards her;
a horrid face that carried the night's darkness,
looked decayed, with worms crawling out from it.
Remember this is a true story about Emmie;
she gets chills just remembering the events of that night……
Contest: Halloween Co-Writes, By Diane Locksley
Poem Written by: Anne Lise Andresen & Teddy Kimathi

The rank smell of Death, Still in the air
Hate evermore has formed my fate.
These tendrils like knives, cut open my heart,
Now I cut Them, and my Demons I ate.
I wipe the face that's no longer mine, yet evil remains.
I will never be saved, for I killed Them, committing unforgivable sin.
They killed me in a way that remains, Oh Their pain tasted sweet,
Like forgiveness and love.
I've tried Them all, and They all tasted sweet.

The ancient Maya had a game
They called Tut to Tut
A game like soccer
but the ball but the ball
would be passed by the thigh
and not the foot.
They played with a latex rubber ball
that some claim contained a human skull
But what ever you think about the game
it was never dull.
Two teams would play before a temple
On a strip of green
the object of the game
to pass the ball through a hoop made of stone
the Winners were victorious
but for the losers
it wasn't so nice
because they'd chop their heads of
and make them a sacrifice.
Glad I wasn't a coach
beats soccer any day.
''Any one for a game of Tut to Tut''?
Don't all shout at once.
Peter Dome.copyright.2013.

Silently you watch me suffer
My cries for help unanswered
I thrash about in my pain
Driven insane by….
The Silence
“She will survive.
She will rise.”
You comfort yourself with these words
Sure that you will not be summoned
To attend a funeral
Ah, there is truth in that
You WILL not be summoned
For there are no attendees
At the funeral
Of a soul
A heart
A dream
Of Love
…….Silence……
The thrashing and moaning lessen
Time passes
The silence... d
e
e
p
e
n
s
You breathe a sigh of relief
It is over
And yet
The silence is broken
Something keeps playing in your mind
Music
Notes
Sorrowful wailing sounds
You cannot block out
It is the requiem
A dirge for my dead heart
Thoughts resurrect
A love still burns
Finally…
You come to search
To find
To verify...
S....i....l....e....n...c....e
Dead hearts don’t speak
You missed the funeral
And the burial
Now….
Do not disturb
My resting place
Yes, stand there
Stand still
With bowed head
Listen…..listen to the silence
A silence matching
The silence
Of your own dead heart
Listen....Listen to
THE SILENCE
Eileen Manassian Ghali

In My Bed Dreaming
{For Ken Saro Wiwa}
When i shall be dreaming,
Who shall be there?
Who shall know about the dream?
Who shall speaks about the dream?
On whose mouth shall it be heard?
I have gone through this land before,
I have swam this water before
Even i have made the fishes,
Sucumbed to my prying hooks.
In my walked through the land,
I have seen the sunset shine through
Over my head into the path,
Of beautiful rainbow flowering plants,
In my swimming through the water,
I have seen the wave washes surf soft over my body,
Likewise the pisces bobbing up in my belly,
This land i have gone through before,
This water i have swam before,
Theses fishes i have caught,
With my prying hooks,
In my walking through the land,
I have seen them dying,
Dark murky sludges covered all of them,
In my swimming through the water ,
I have dark murky sludges covered me,
And the fishes have all gone dead,
I have seen them all,
I have seen the land dying,
I have seen the water going murky dark,
I have seen the fishes all going dead,
And i have seen them ,
All have gone dead,
I have called my own,
I have shouted it out,
I have cried to those two ears,
I have stood in the gap,
I have stretched forth my hands,
To gather those who have no voice,
Won't they hear me,
The land, the water and fishes,
All have gone dead,
Won't they hear me
All the dark murkey sludges,
Are to our horrible existence,
And i shall be shouting,
I shall be crying to them with ears,
Until our land, water and fishes have been cleansed,
Then i shall be on my bed dreaming ,
When i shall be dreaming,
Who shall be there?
Who shall know about the dream?
Who shall speaks about it?
On whose mouth shall it be heard?

Not giv’n to pray, they were grey monks
‘Mid the holy band, ole’ Father John
Who was a gansta and wanksta,
Held command with some merry wives
That were healed of un-upright-nesses
Of them was Johanna selle her belle chose
And walke as fresh as is a red rose.
Many ministered unto him their substance.
Such was then pious lusty man of this crowd
This monk possess’d such wond’rous pow’r
To rub out the sin that Satan chalk’d upon
And gave fresh license to start afresh.
Near, in a farm house liv’d this gay dame
Quite clever in throwing a spanner in works
Father John sought the cell ev’ry week
Once a thump at the door, the husband came
Who was dodgy and a nutter
Punished the father with his thick stick.
Till he confessed "no he’d play the priest".

I am the maker of miracles
a real spiritual man
waltzing through shadows
as they pull me back in
I know I must escape them
any way I can
I know the way out
like the back of my hand
It's just me and the maker
together, he and I
I told you God is in me
you just thought I was high
talking with the Zeta's
they tell me just why
everything has an ending
and the old me, must die
I'm Calm as a bomb
in the eyes of a storm
they stare upon me
as if I've been warned
turn me inside out
as a goodness is born
I wear my battle scars
so stars know I'm war torn
When the gift of life
is freed from inside
the fire starts fading
then the anger subsides
like the great phoenix,
I go back in time
a miracle is born
and now that I'm revived
in my new life, I shine.

Hither I stand, at crossroads,
And then I gaze, at the yonder end-
The vague horizon from where I began;
And all that I may ever deem
Is that- my days
Have been a waken dream.
Hither I stand, at the edge of my dream;
Then I wonder, at the depth of my trance-
An adventurous journey through the wondrous woods;
An idyllic stroll through the vicissitudinous meadow;
And from the final station as I depart,
All that I can ever say, is that
Perpetuation has been a rouge
Of fleeting phases of my life.
Suyash Saxena
St. Stephen’s College.

A Drunk's Prison
Having sold cold misery to enjoy the lack of pain
drinking spirits to blot out the cold hard rain
Beaten down, busted out and without prayer or hope
thinking of a long step and a short rope
Another shot of whiskey to ease such morbid thoughts
This season of woes always brings out inner demons to play
skipping rope while cursing them to just leave
they sing unhappy and merciless off key melodies
Another shot banishes them straight to hell
replaced by wailing women demanding more time!
No respect for a man drinking and desperately thinking
of just how far once was up to have just now grabbed sickness!
Another drink sends them back to Hades
RED COLORS BLASTING EYES SHUT !
Fallen and there is no getting up until the spirit leaves !
Not another shot, tomorrow they find this useless old tattered
body!
Robert L. 08- 23 1987

How queer the color of viscera
squarely foreign in my breast
To be the butcher and grim and goddess
All in one
Leaves identity succinct
Or identifies succinctness
If it has been
Then so it was always before
Therein is 'Peace'
Reposed and eyes rolling
Great, vacant saucers on vertiginous axis
She is quite the swollen beast
And on all fronts, she is terrible
If only you'll watch you may notice her growth
A malignant sort
An unwelcome appendage
I'd dash it out but I've already gone
Too pale and dogged in life to succumb
I curse her tenacity
She has a sister, I think
Or maybe a child
A child who lives down deep in my chest
A child who shrieks and tears down the walls
Perhaps she dislikes their pattern

The white dragon hunts you.
With eyes of a predator, ever watching.
Waiting in the dark shadows to strike.
I have chased this dragon before.
For he has haunted me, as well.
Many a lifetime ago.
That you did not know.
There is terror in my heart.
I want to scream, run!
But you will not hear me,
Over the roar of his breath,
or the promise of more.
Your choice binds you to the chase.
No spell I can cast will be enough to save you,
Beautiful boy.
I can only stand here,
and watch,
as this dragon looms
over your poisoned mind,
and weakened body.
You are running out of time.
The chaos is closing in.
Gripping you tighter every time.
I cannot stand to watch.
My heart dies a thousand deaths.
You must run.
Please, I beg of you, for all you are beautiful boy.
I don't want to watch you slip into the past,
As you fall prey to the dragon.
Run!!
GypsyofEssence

Twilight off darkness
opening past scars entering
into those violated by unpleasant dreams
Dumped in a canal left for dead
trailed through a wooded area an unknowing victim
tortured for hours without mercy or shame
I prayed to God to save me
with all the strength that he gave me
charging these vile beasts
falling to the ground broken
I fell in my last fight for life
Dumped where no one would find me
tears falling inside a labyrinth
raping over and over again this mind
Ghosts appear knowing no bounds
dark suckling on a soul's blood
I saw myself lying in the water dead
nothing seemed real it all felt dreamlike
without pain praying in my dream
awakening to awful unbearable pain
A day had passed
I awoke legs and body under water
In such aches tearing into my being
to see the Devil's own dancing drunk
torturing me trying to break my legs
casting me lower than an animal
the smell of fear ripping at the heart and soul
Lips hanging apart such a nightmare
one eye almost out off the socket
I roared to the Heaven's crying
oh God look what they have done to me
hours it took to trail myself to safety
One kneecap was off the joint
the agony was unreal caked in blood
trailed myself to safety passed out
awakening in hospital
doctors said it was a miracle 79 internal bruises on ex-rays missing vital organs by small fractions they said judging by your injuries I was left for dead then they thought i would loose my sight as my iris was damaged thanking God I am still alive I am writing my book called the Irishman's hell for 5 weeks of hell I ate with a straw it was this month many years ago this happened something has brought it all back

Thou Shalt Not Kill
We think in a court of law . . .
Where the death sentence is being carried out
Use of the Holy Bible should never be allowed
For this breaks one of the Almighty Lord God’s
Moral imperatives in the Ten Commandments
Whereby, He declared: “Thou Shalt Not Kill.”
Our verdict on this subject is . . .
This action is certainly not a man-given right
To do such an immoral thing.
The very executors . . .
Of such a heinous sentence
Are no better than the
Monsters they kill,
But kill them they do.
We as human beings . . .
Truly must be better than this.
Or is this trait an indelible aspect of our psyche
And our collective Cosmic DNA?
Perhaps down the line . . .
God himself gives these particular sinners
A full taste of His Divine Redemption or His Divine Retribution.
His Choice.
The death penalty is not justice at all . . .
It’s just an easy way of getting rid of problems
And sweeping them conveniently under the rug.
Life is truly sacred . . .
“Thou Shalt Not Kill”
A timeless Christian virtue.
All of us, as thinking intelligent creatures . . .
Who inhabit this Earth
Should devoutly treasure this divine commandment.
Amen! Amen! Amen!
Liam McDaid and Gary Bateman – October 24, 2014 (Free Verse Collaboration)

My heart lies out in the cold
Where cold wind blows and
The dark birds of winter sing their song of death.
Seven days I waited for salvation
Slowly, my ever cell froze
Each becoming a crystal of ivory china.
My thoughts, as still as my bones,
Waver as if I was stuck in a wall of glass.
In death I found beauty
Of an everlasting stillness.
Though my body beaten, my face stained,
With tears and blood
and my thighs and hips covered in their own filthy secretion
My face remains a youthful, beautiful woman of desire.
The insides spill out, but the body from which they came,
Will be forever frozen in an illustrious lure.
Forever desired by men of filth, and men of wealth alike.
This is the cold.

The sallow faces of man
Sunken eyes, cracked voices
Unheard, unseen
Bound to the bidding of gold and paper.
Mangled carcasses
Harbouring far ends of this earth
Blood staining the hard, coarse tarred grounds
Screams of anguish disregarded.
Homes of green marred
As Bengals are stripped for their coat
Helpless beasts left whimpering
The barren land left behind destitute.
Two turns of a thousand
Now trains speed and towers are mountains
Still we slaughter our kind
Drag our feet along the paths of our sins
Unflinching.

I will not be constrained within the arms of depression
So I push myself away from her
Rise from the bed
Wipe the smell of her from my limbs
I do not look back
lest I be turned to stone
She lays on the bed with her Medusa smile
Singing her siren's song
"Come to me, let me pleasure you
feel my softness
dive into my darkness."
My mind
Pauses
Craves
I'm drawn to her whisper
Longing to suckle at the breasts of her iniquity
Too wrap myself in pleasuristic pain
seeking solace
comfort
I cry to the heavens
deliver me from my demon
Do not allow her to devour me
Help me to crave a new light
I emerge renewed
cleansed
revitalized
Seeing beyond the lesser me
left in a state of thanks on bended knee
Light floods
The shadows flee
I have escaped
She didn't win
I was meant to be free
The other self was never me

An unleashed scream echoes through the valley
Rallying cry of the wyrm
Confess your madness
In shearing bouts that cleave mountains
Leaving them asunder
Fire storms rage, scorching terra
Lighting strikes arc across the sky, in disjointed bolts
Lava spews from Hephaestus’s furnace
The ever imposing demon lord sits atop his molten necropolis
Come forth armies of calamity
Wreak havoc across the continents
Melt earth into hell, and suffocate the heavens with poisonous smoke
Ever impending doom speeds across the horizon
Flee in terror
Though it be in vain
A light in a maelstrom
What chance, might you have?

Come to think of it
I'm not entirely sure
where I lost myself
Maybe it was in those 8 hours
of class time
lost in notes and definitions
In beds of strangers or
old friends who I no longer
know the whereabouts of
Did I lose myself somewhere
along those roads driven on
late nights to places with people
whose faces I won't ever recall?
Did I leave myself behind in
books or shows or at the cinema?
Or maybe it was the ticking of the clocks
and the counting of time
waiting for better times
that never came
Come to think of it
I'm not entirely sure I lost myself
I'm not entirely sure I had myself
Maybe all these places
are where I've found myself

Fear is a spiritual relief
Physically I am fear
Mentally I am fearless
A pulse of understanding
But will a vein transfer?
A heart, a lung?
Taste the sweat
taste the fear
Taste the blood
Carry, cradle the bald baby
Master the meaning of love
Who said that life was a misery?
A sting, an ache, a hurtful word.
Artificial fun,
That has what has become
Horse for Beef
Beef for Horse
We are only skin and meat operations
For Allah
Suck our pure and false blood,
A clot, a knot that ties our tongues
This machine has turned us to metal
And dried us without pegs or hooks
All the glittery eyes
They are now colorless
Non-existent, numb.

Jump up and down like a jackrabbit
running through meadows
running from what?
Could it be heartbreak,
a venemous snake that hides in the grass,
hiding with fangs ready to pierce the tender skin
upon the tight, bronze flesh of everyday life?
Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye now!
I need a vacation a long way away from the faceless smiles
and ignorance of young girls, who don't look at you,
who don't show you love and respect.
Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye now,
as jumping spiders hop everywhere, crawling eight legs around me
my soul black like carcoal, but my heart still beating
slower this time, not like the days before
and like the jackrabbit running from anything and everything,
I run to seek love and vanish away from the empty voids
that people call, their souls.
Recording a film with no tape,
talking to a woman you love, but not having the guts to tell her how you really feel
Jump my boy, like a jackrabbit, take my advice
tell her before she leaves
turns down the endless avenues of endless dark love
the trees grow taller, taller than you
and you sit there feeling away yourself die, missing out in life.
I cannot see you lose your love.
Say it, say it, Say it!!! Tell her! Tell her! Build the guts up!
Build up the courage, tell her how you feel. Take her by the hand and never say goodbye! Never say goodnight, stay with her till the flight comes in the morning
of the first rays of sun shine through your dorm room take her and love her!
Do not be like me, the jackrabbit! I see no happiness
Reading poetry it makes me sad,
to write of others falling in love and I never finding the one.
People tell me, you'll find yours, have hope
but I am a frightened little jackrabbit
who flees from sounds of deep emotions, not having courage to fall in love,
not building the guts up to tell her how I really feel.
She walks alone, I find my oppertunity and sing my love song
She smiles and moves on,
please tell me I cannot fight anymore.
All I have to say is Goodbye, Goodbye, Goodbye
I need a vacation
to go to some sandy beach on an island of love
and write and write and write, the same poetry that depresses me
but makes you all fall in love with words!
Fiction about love stories, please kiss me
Blue eyed death comes, plays a game of chess with me
I bet twenty, he bets my soul
Kiss me death, the only love I'll ever get,
besides my poet friends who kiss my ass
Listen to my heart, truely, I don't write of beauty
I write for the sorrow soul, the fleeing jackrabbit
running away from love.....

Why me this is a curse not a gift
I have NF-1
When people look and ask me what is that on my arm
I change the subject
At school it is real hard
I feel I'm disliked by the other kids
I was so different it doesn't help that I'm shy
The kids would all point and laugh
Walking down the hallway
To any class
I have the type where I get tumors
That mess up my skin.
I've always tried to be the normal one
Hiding this curse
Keeping my sleeves down
I'm the only one in my family that has it
They don't really know what It's like
My family says not to be discouraged
I keep my poker face on so everyone thinks I'm brave
When the truth is I can barely look at my face in the mirror
My boyfriend whom I love so much
Says I'm perfect the way I am
I love to hear him say that cause it gets me through the day
I'm 20 now and trying to except it
I'm barely holding up
But I'm moving forward
To make the best of my future

Ike The Terrible
Ike; You had gone to many places and than you came
to Texas. You were not invited, but you decided to come
anyway. A lot of people left before that terrible day. A lot
of us had no choice, but to stay.
Like a thief in the night you arrived, on that 13th of September
of 2008. We didn't sleep that night - everybody was worried. You
came in with force and fury. Soon the lights went out, by morning
you had already done your damage. Millions of people were left
without power.
For some people it was eight days, for others it was more, still others
didn't have power for weeks. But Ike - you didn't care. You came here
to destroy. Many people were without food, ice, or milk for their babies.
Others lost all they had.
In the daytime, when the rains finally stopped, we could see in our areas
the destruction you had left behind, but that was nothing compared to what
you did in Galveston and other towns. What we saw on TV was devastating.
Many lives were lost.
Ike - time has passed and now you are only a bitter memory. We learned
something in these DISASTERS. God can give us plenty, but he can also
take it away. You left us with deep scars, but from this - we will recover.
We are now more united and closer to God.

By Lucilla M. Carrillo
Note: I wrote this in 2008 when it happened.
It was the first and only Hurricane That I have
ever witnessed.

I cry myself awake
In the middle of the day
Because of a decision I made
Not to spend time with you.
And now everything I am
Is falling apart into pieces;
I feel like I am losing you
Because I am losing myself.

Twisted and true many live threw dark sunny days,
Not to cast a natural shadow or even open closed
doors with a flash light, These dark sunny days
are all overcast, casted by your own shadows Covering up
what's inside weighing you down, day by day piece
by piece, Don't think they don't notice your cover, staying
out of the light on dark sunny day Living
only in mystery.

The Eyes
The eyes so shattered and so blue,
You sit there and you knew
The pain of losing someone close to you,
And you beg for their return,
But a wish so great, can never be granted.
The eyes shattered and blue,
Watch you,
Take the bottle and drowned yourself,
They watch you destroy yourself,
And they know what they do,
Yet they show no remorse, no pain in heart.
You fall asleep
On a dirty mattress,
Held up by broken dreams
And nightmares,
No pillow, no blanket
Just air you float on.
And your blind eyes close in the night,
The dreams come back to haunt you
And the eyes, they watch you,
So shattered and so blue.
Till three o’clock hits again
Wake in cold sweat,
Spiders on webs weaving a nest
In your head,
A cry out for the Madhouse,
Where the eyes so shattered and so blue
Stare at you, through a window with no reflection.
-10/3/2013

(for: ngozi)
the latest of black beauties
under the clouding sky
under this clouding sky of africa
our only voice of hope
she comes singing her songs
on her butterfly-coloured lips
antennae of laughters play
the true rhythm of old nature
& she comes in raw smoothness
a happy solitary lass
like a herald to our native beauty
her country-side dancing steps
inviting the admiration of all
every man stakes his life
for her golden image.
yea! an ancient dancer
a dark face beaming with brightness
shining like this happy sun
& whole communities salute her
for an endless rhythm she rings
& her fleet of diamond teeth
they come singing of her
a spark of light in a dark region.

I know you see me from up there,
from halfway up the steep and twisting lane.
In early half-light as you take your walk
I no doubt seem to loom as you descend,
appear to grow, to rise from earth,
my boxlike rectilinearity,
severe and unadorned geometry,
a silhouette against the solitary sodium source.
I once hosted fiery-throated hymns
from dedicated souls in Sunday best:
“Marchog, Jesu, yn llwyddiannus”,
“O! Iesu mawr, rho d’anian bur” –
voices rich and raised and resonant,
so filled with faith, so gorged with God.
My pitch-pine pews were polished
by coat and skirt and trouser twill.
Abandoned now, unloved, slab-still,
void and stark and desolate,
with quarry-tiled floor that would resound
with joy were anyone to walk upon it,
I present gaping emptiness, a thing felt,
a cave whose darkness, palpable,
is peopled by retreating echoes of my past,
like timorous ghosts far too afraid to speak.
But there is One I must not name
who lodges in my roomy quarters,
cowers within my tight square corners,
seeking shadows when the sun stares in.
I hear Him breathing as
He sweats in His remorse, a thing smelt,
hiding from the accusing gaze
of His forlorn creation.

there are days-
the path you are walking was thorny, maybe
only for now.
Problems and crisis tried to stop you to arise.
It might, but do last.
There are times, storm crawling from afar,
You knew it was for you
Its steady wind lash
Starting to
knock you down
and you grieve. Not long-
Stand, and just stand
soon you can take your step back
You went to battlefield, because you should,
if not, who will and who be
weak hand and tired mind, shouting you to stop
but
still you can raise your weary wrist
and throw your eyes to the sky.
Hearts have a heart, it was love.
It hold you, it clings on hope
It touches those that you care, those that you love
There are moment
You are walking alone
You have no penny on your pocket
All you have is laughter in the rain.

When I begin to meditate
About the life before now
And the life that is due to prevail
Deep in this thought
I heard calls from no where
Chanting into my ears
A note of warning
“Don’t let the trees surrounding
This wide fence fall”
Amid this puzzling call
I unearth from a far
Mix voices flaunting a goal
“We will not sheathe our swords
Until all our desires come to pass”
In between these dilemma I inquire
On whose command will lives live?
20/6/2013

I find the red light
On a corner of a field of stone.
Lucy something – was she just thirteen?
Or maybe that century was a carved eighteen?
I ponder what she lived in stories I will never know.
Dropped by the hands of ghosts and demons,
Choking on Forever’s bread crumbs
Into always another tomorrow.

Viper like she slowly slid her tongue into his mouth
Startled he recoiled, but then he tasted honey sweet
The warmth of her fiery body pressed against his
And her arms coiled around his waist seductively erotically
He was lost in a world of memory and what should have been
He had remembered her taste for years to come
Would she ever return in the dark black steamy night
Driving him insane, arousing his every single pore
Or was she just his fantasy this black dark sensuous viper
That slithered across his bed and left him desiring more.

In the purple haze of the bar room
you muse lustful moves
like the true artist you are
you stumble but find yourself
in the midst of shipwrecks
swaying to the trash band
of suburban artifacts
the dance floor groans
like a wooden sailboat
in a hurricane
pot smoke belly aches
too much acid
messes with your head
your sailor escorts you
like a tugboat down
the wonky lane
where in the backseat
of his Cadillac
you swallow the salty
cocktail of regrets
dawn breaks and
you'll do it all again tonight.

"Darkling in Distress"
Spirits of ancient entities
prowl hauntingly through eerie mist
encumbered by flesh no more
beyond sweet breath of lovers kiss
as skeletons of eras past
evaporated vapors
wandering through tunnels
concealed by lace drapes of sorrow.
in clandestine atmosphere
horror of hollow empty shells
dark corridors impune
as essence of torturous bones
consume an imprisoned heart
of a darkling in distress.
kidnapped in a vacant enclosure
of constrained emotions
sequestered in quicksand
down in a dark dungeon
of a Life broken
a crushed pedestal
a crumpled effigy
spewing volcanic ash
from a verbotin sham
sad spirit departs
to wanderlust
of withered dust
parched and perished by pain
black memories
scream ... scream ...
down in the dark dungeon
thoughts tantalize: Life is only a vapor, a mist
and Death is the beginning of Life.
*darkling - an entity in pain
*verbotin - forbidden
*For Nathan's Insanity of Death Contest ..

My man is Bluebeard
On this holiday for two
And I don't want to go
To spend every hour asleep or awake
With him
His voice controlling every action
every movement moment.
I will be caught in the might
of his King Kong grip
Alternately controlling
then beseeching
The needy man child
desperate to be loved
that makes this monstrous He
That must subjugate and control the She
To leave nothing to chance
In this the field of love
To hold and crush in his hot hand
the fragile wilting bloom
Content with that death
for ownership is all.

I stand alone
Weary whithering
Like a fading bloom
Deep within a forest
Shrouded in darkness
Beneath the towering trees
That took my daylight away
I'm suffocating I cannot breath
Smothered by creepers
And fallen leaves
Forgotten worthless
Void of love and tender care
I let out a primal scream
My pain so much
That goes unheard
I am pecked clawed by scavenging
Carrion bird
Life is a heavy weight chained to my heart
That curses my being
And is tearing me apart.
Peter Dome. copyright.2014. Aug.

Stillness in the night
Silhouettes of Zulu’s
Move along the ridgeline
Monkey’s howl
And men cry
The darkness has no friends
Evil specter of death
In the banana trees
Fruit bats on the wing
Sweating in this jungle
I have but one goal
Remain
Lock and load
Weapons
In the hands
Of teens
Machetes
Teeth
Cut limbs
From torso’s
Lying on the cracked
Jungle floor
Seeping loneliness
Into the heart
Of darkness
That bears no witness
To the soul

I couldn't help but notice
that the dead wood
in society when gathered
could make quite a bonfire
if only one could collect it
but my kindling
had been eaten
by the termites
and so the rot
gets hold of more
and more
until we all rot

You think you’ve gone just far enough,
I could smile knowing you’ve gone far enough that you can’t go back again
You think you were careful but,
I’ve caught a glimpse of your true, wretched form
You think you can find a way into my good graces
I’ve seen what you are, monsters with a friendly costume
You can’t deceive me anymore and, I don’t consort with serpents
You think I’m a game to be played but, trust me, you could never win
Don’t underestimate me
You think I’m a joke but, trust me you won’t be laughing
You think I’m just talking myself up but, trust me, you’re the ones going down
My eyes took too long to adjust
Better late than never
It may take a monster to know one but, I promise my teeth are sharper than yours
My first reaction to the hideous revelation that was your form was to weep
Fall to my knees, maybe even wretch my heart from my chest and onto the carpet
Then I thought about the mess it would make
I decided the only blood that will spill, will be your own
I was not weak, but I had a weakness
A heart of soft gold stitched to my sleeve with care
No longer
Now my heart is a stone so heavy
I could kill at least two birds at once
Being the nice guy is a thing of the past
Thanks for freeing me of that softness
You thought I was all sunshine and delicate things
When really I had just been swallowing razor blades
Now that sun is setting and I hope you see it was you who were wrong
Can you feel my darkness coming, because it’s eager to hold you
If you thought I was the one who would just stand still or turn to run
Your gonna be the one with tired feet
I’m not sad anymore
Just sick with the plague of your lies
Contagious, and I’m looking for someone to kiss
Even angels can make themselves wicked
When we do, we take no prisoners
Still think I’m a game
This one is just beginning

When a man cries himself to sleep,
it is a sad sight to see,
tears roll off his cheek
and onto his bed sheets and pillow case.
When you hear his somber cries,
you can feel his pain
when he wimpers like a child who treds in fear.
No one knows what they do to a man
when they play with his emotions,
lead him on,
take advantage of him.
They don't know what they do to an innocent man
looking for love.
They break his heart that is full of love,
they stab him in the back
when he needs them at his most vulnerable moment
they laugh at him, and tease him,
Do they know what they do to a man?
They slowly kill a man, who just wants a simple kiss on the lips,
they kill a dreamer, a good man, with a big heart.
They drive a man to his bed,
with tears running down his face
and force him to dream of nightmares.
When a man cries himself to sleep,
it is that saddest thing to see.
Goodnight and sweet dreams...

A witch has capabilities to get me if I am curse.
God knows she can scare a stone in his or her godly works.
However, the road I travel leaves her flabbergasted.
Her spells and portion becomes acid.
The water from the rain shrinks her head into a grue fuse.
The eyes in the back of her head become a muddle puddle.
Culmination tarns, when another Great Lake forms.
A warlock is her next-to-kin, or might he be her husband?
On the lagoon, sits a village of huts.
The anger of passion can make all combustible.
Meres form in the fire trucks.
The hoses swarm around as a flood.
Insurance rebuilds the village of huts into a majestic megalopolis.
Aplomb all are in their Heliopolis.
In a paroxysm, drives the Papadopoulos family.
Making a wrong turn ended them at their home in Megalopolis.
Not a difference was seen and they never return to their origin.
They are fifth generation now with family throughout the universe.
Their blood has made real children for all.
Revelation of the witchcraft has evolve.
The witches and warlocks of Megalopolis control and solve all created
worlds.
________________________________________|
PENNED ON AUGUST 20, 2014!

You said that you loved,
Though, I told you that you were lost,
Instead I was shoved.
You were in state of lust...
Where have all feelings gone?
Why has all innocence ceased?
Where has cherishment gone?
Why has all the laughter ceased?
Where has your hope gone?
Did you ever hear what I told you?
Did you ever understand?
Did you ever listen to what we played?
Did you ever comprehend?
Did you ever read what I wrote you?
Did you ever let in what the stupid world said?
Did we play just to become pawns in your game?
Did we get this far just to feel the hate?
My expectations deceived,
I wish I was totally happy,
Give me your reasons,
Give me a reason for all that was done,
Give me a reason to turn and run from this...
You said that you loved,
Instead you were in state of lust,
Give me a reason, why would you lie?
This was not discussed,
Why did you feed on me?
I was deceived by your indiscrete mind,
I was crushed by your hidden hypocrisy...
There were times I standed for you,
There were times I would have died for you,
The worst part of this is looking back again.
Know that your hate, left you without a hand to hold,
Know that when freedom seems out of my reach,
I will fight for self-liberty...
The conversations took a sudden turn,
And, now you are an unwanted thorn,
There's a poison drop now.
You wanted to earn more than you can bestow,
You were insatiable,
Because you were blinded by greed and lust...
Why has all innocence disappeared?
Where have all the feelings gone?
You were wanting what your eyes can't see,
Needing what your arms can't reach,
Hearing what your ears can't hear,
Feeling what you can't even touch...
Would you mind if I killed you?
Would I mind to get harmed?
Would I mind if you try to break my heart?
What have you done now?
You wanted trust, but you lied,
You wanted help, but you got lost,
You missed me when I scattered...
You swore an oath,
But still you were blinded by your greed and lust.
Why are we missed when the world is fading by human fault?
Why are we loved only when everything is gonna be gone?

Festered lament maddens me
Why must the despair of my heart’s desire
Truly enlighten me?
I rested among the sick and lame
And found myself no different from the rest
For a troubled mind holds endless poverty
Penniless regret marks as a sickness no doctor can prescribe
For the bottles of balm are empty
And medicinal hope grows angry
I derived my madness from creativity
Revealing the remains of my humanity
‘Cool off, child’, I heard a soft voice whisper
But can’t you see I live off the flame?
It asks for no nickel or dime!
But it seeks to destroy all the same
The small voice returns at times
And often my heart listens
But we all listen
And only believe in the inevitability of pain
I speak of the majority
Not of you
For you are blessed and beyond disgrace
You have a life—a beautiful face
And most of all, you are rich
With attributes I can only dream of
You are rich with life and purpose
Holding inscrutabilities I can only wish to understand
You lift me without touch or care
Disposing me from your treasures
Because though you meant no harm,
You are rich with blessing
And must remove all possible threats
So my festered lament
Remains an enlightenment
I can say I am rich in poverty
But you are forever rich
In Mystery
What hurts the most is knowing
I may be wrong about you
For you are so obscure in this mind
And as empty as I am I wish to be filled
In your richness
But we all are filled to the brim in the end
And sometimes I cannot distinguish the good from the bad
There is nothing I wish to discard
So I hoard in constant deficiency and despair
And I hoard the idea that you are beyond compare
That you are rich
And always will be richer
Than me—or he

In the sky
At the bottom of the Earth
Four times the size
Of the U.S. of A.
In Chile,
Blinded salmon, rabbits
And ranchers
Testify to something nasty
Going on with the sun.
Up North,
Cavefish politicians
Scoff at these revelations, saying,
"No hole up here, and see -
We've been blind for years."
One day these self-made eyeless
May find themselves upon the plates
Of the forgotten Morlocks down below.

i’m lost.
wandering my mind, hollow now.
secrets tucked in the seams, invisible to passer-bys.
each step leaves an imprint behind,
dust settling into the crevices left by my toes.
the world empty,
immune to stolen glances between souls and half-hearted exchanges.
peace swept away,
pushed to the side by an old broom of straw and wood.
oxygen dissipates,
I try hard,
harder to breathe.
but all that is left to soothe my lungs
is the empty, grey air,
void of the warmth of shared space
.
sometimes I sneak away
to send a fluid rush to my veins,
entrancing my mind in a fictional fantasy.
alone, I bathe in my secrecy,
cleansing my skin with vibrant truths.

You moulded me to your perfection then bounced me around the room
to show ownership of me to your friends
So I purred and smiled and batted my eyes
Acted asthough I enjoyed it
I loved all of them the way you taught me
So you were pleased for a while
For a while I was safe
You bent me out of shape and pushed me as far as I could take
So I tried to smile and bat my eyes but I couldn't help but cry
It made you happy for a while
These chains swing and hurt my wrists as they break and cut my veins
I'm lying here alone unclaimed
I wish to feel the hurt again
I want the tears upon my face
The cold gleam in your eye
I need you to be happy for a while
The darkness stinks, I'm in disgrace all used up a broken face
Bones are broken beneath the skin
I love your smile you've such a grin
Now at least your happy again

I have seen so much from my window on the second floor,
I have seen the Storm Devils actively, knocking at all your doors,
They voraciously attack using their dark, and stormy, winds that roll.
Yes, I have seen the cause for all these twisted, viscous, nasty storms…
Storm Devils have been sending sleepless, and devilishly, stormy nights.
They’ve been attacking: riding rolling, black clouds, putting you in this plight.
Riding upon the cloud tops they throw their lightning down.
Their laughter is the thunder, as they mock all the innocents around.
They’ve visited every home, as they’ve viciously danced upon your roofs.
Yielding devilish, twisting devastation, to every one, everywhere you look.
Now, hide your little children, for they will sweep them, right out from your arms.
Run to find your safety in basements, for their reach is so deep and full of harm…
Even the trolls and goblins will join you in the corners where they’ll weep.
For attacking your homes is a game, they find deliciously, devilishly sweet.
With each dark and stormy roll, they’ll attack with all their might.
And they have a forceful stamina that can travel, far beyond your sight.
Now say your prayers, beloved, with all your worldly might.
It’s time to send these demons back, to their dark homes before another night.
IF together and in unison your voices go reaching into the sky to climb…
Then God will send them below, until they escape again… next time.
Don’t be surprised, when eventually their escape is finally wrought.
For the devil will aide in their escape, and all that they have sought.
You’ll hear his devilish laughter added next time, if only for the thought…
That when they come again… it’ll be against you …the storm is brought.

I am haunted
incapable of escaping you
I would rather be tortured
than lose you...
You the haunted house
your dark ancestors
peer out of the windows
of your haunted eyes
walking in a no-mans land
between life and death
sleeping yet walking...
I will not exorcise you
from my existence
I'd miss your sweet fragrance
the soft sound
of your footsteps to my doorway...
Tonight I lie awake
in this haunting darkness
waiting for the night to end
but your image will not leave
lingering behind my eyes
the haunting begins...
~ ~ ~ ~

I cry yet do not weep
The remnants of my pillaged decaying heart
Lay in the putrid foul gutter deep
Beneath your feet
Cursed at birth wounded throughout life
Feeling the hurt of countless stabbing knifes
A mere puppet torn this way and that
Deflated emancipated buried
Feeling lost lonely and crap
So much love to give
I spend my life in darkness and limbo
And do not live
Time goes past
So fast
I lay here in my cocoon
And lick my wounds
On the dark side of the moon
Lacking affection and tender care
I reach out but still no one there
No lovers head nuzzled gently upon my chest
Do rest
No pleasure no relief
I mourn my passing with so much grief
Unwanted unloved unlovable
I rest my weary bones
In the freezing gutter my heart no home
Waiting anticipating my impending fate
Won't someone rescue me
Before it's too late
As I slip closer and closer to oblivion.
Peter Dome.copyright.2014. Aug.

There she goes,
a mile away from me already,
so fast to leave such a good man,
that showed her the world
and all its wonders.
Such a man as I,
does not need so much stress,
does not deserve such heartbreak.
I am a man who deserves smiles,
not heartbreak and pain.
To feel my heart race faster and faster
I lay at home with a smile
as God comes down to me,
shall I take his message and I shall dress
in such silk and cotton
and dance with the sun, moon and stars,
wait for a new woman,
steady paced woman she will come my way,
and take me by the hand,
like a fish to the bait onto the hook
up higher and higher she goes
into my net.
There she goes higher and higher,
farther and farther,
a mile further.
Love is strange,
just keep on smiling.

Once again , walking on a path of
nothingness,
The cold of the night greets me, the
pouring rain reflecting my despair,
I stumble along the path, dreading to turn
my back,
Even the smallest of joyful memories turn
pitch black,
The sands of time continue to flow
through the hour glass,
So much truth to say, fearing which
moment will be my last,
Weeks pass , and i continue to protect my
secrets with lies,
Boundaries of my heart have been
violated, not once but twice,
From within the depths of my soul, my sins still
echo,
Screaming and demanding that i step out
from the shadows,
Cowardice etched into every cell of my
being,
So i continue my walk, unable to fathom
the devastation i may cause,
In the distance , faintly hearing the devil's
applause.

Hunger Warning
Family and friends are first to go
Then the teeth and hair
Weight loss due to hunger
Is guaranteed
Begging for food is against the law
In most communities
Hunger is not a crime but should be
I’m looking for my other shoe
Something delectable to chew on
If you have it bring it back
I licked it in the morning
Who knows what you might contract
From someone as low as me
Return it please and let me starve in peace

Old Stackhouse Joe
Had a lazy eye
Sunday morning choirboy
He could sing like a lark
He had a stiletto
He sharpened all the time
Stuck a pig
And called it bloody wine
Poker night at Joe’s
Always a fight
Smoking day old
Cigarettes he’d bought one at a time
Spent some time in Quentin
Jailhouse tattoos
Scar across his cheek
From a razor in Duluth
Said she stick around
But cut him instead
She only did once
Cause now she is dead
Whiskey and wine is all that he drank
Never saw him sober
Sunday morning choirboy
He could sing like a lark
Wouldn’t want to cross him
Anytime after dark

Bullets shed blood, but couldn’t kill him.
Truth had lit even the dark nooks.
Waves of Non-violence had swept clean
All the weapons. An earthquake had
Toppled a mighty empire. And he
Was the pivot . Rays of Sacrifice
Had formed rainbows of triumph
In the sky of millions. When he
Had marched to Dhandi, history gave birth
To a new chapter. His vibrant words
Had shaken the distant Africa too.
Finally, he could drop the long longed
Nectar on the tongue tips of Indians
To get his reward with a pistol.
Now,
bereft and cleft by the dark minds
laughing with the white teeth,
our fair lady laments on .
Gandhiji breaks his spectacles,
holds his stick upside down,
and gets ready to step out
from the frame hanging on the wall
for a Second Coming.

Death, it is a sad way to go,
to leave this earth, dressed in your Sunday best
While faces surround you with tears
breaking the barriers of their emotions
tearing their hearts apart, looking down
upon my stone face, upon the face, lays a simplistic smile
that shows no emotion, no teeth, no life.
Death, it is a sad way to go.
People hurry, say their goodbyes,
but when your alive,
they never come around, they never call, they never even think
of you and how you are feeling.
While you walk the streets, with a smile on your face,
nothing but knives stick sharpe in my back and gossip
burns a hole in my soul and heart;
but I keep on walking and smiling.
I keep rolling on through like a summer hurricane
tears apart a coastal city in the heat of June weather,
Walking till death comes to shake my hand and grin at my soul.
Then as you lay their in your casket
with a buqouet of your favorite flowers, (Roses and Tulips)
they sit around you, the same faces, the same blind eyes
and they all shed tears and says good things.
Too late for that don't you think?
Death, it is a sad way to go, but what relief you get,
when finally departing in peace and leaving the drama
and careless people in your life.
After I am put six feet under, a week of crying passes,
After two weeks I am lost and long forgotten,
nothing but a stone at my cranium to keep me company
and my new friends, who sleep along next to me.
Dead and forgotten, but the dead never forget their fellow lost souls.
Only the living forget such souls that were so good to them,
now they are gone,
I am gone.
How do you feel, now that I am gone?
Death, it is a sad way to go, but what peace you recieve in Paradise.

Born to live,
Never wanting to die,
fearing death to its every limit,
as blue eyed death grabs my shoulders
and laughs with grim
and I fear death even more.
Car crashes, murders, greed and envy
takes me to a place where I can't find hope.
Laughs grow and brings tears to my eyes,
I hope off trains and dodge cars driving down freeways
taking time to sit down and look at my ways,
that push me left nor right.
Up nor down can I see the time tick away
I can't wait till I walk Jacob's ladder,
till a black demon tears me down,
and sins rip me open,
like a surgeon to a patient on a table,
Me, myself and I take time to see the wrongs in life.
Do I dare shake the vines from the dark green jungles
that tangle deep in my mind, body and soul?
I shake with vengence when time turns its face from me.
Time has no time for me
and she takes me by the hand and wastes my life away
with endless heartbreak and drunken whores and buffoons,
who care only about themselves.
The evil souls burn away,
and their blind eyes do not see what they do to others' hearts and souls.
I believe the strangeness of me is that I love too much,
and care too much to actually open my eyes and see what burns away
infront of my very eyes.
I only see what my heart wants to see
my romantic side kills me away,
while my physical being is falling apart with heartbreak and sorrow.
The strange part is,
love was never there to be found,
and the strangeness of me,
is that I love too much to see blue eyed death coming to get me.

All turned down to the worst
as the children lost innocence,
as the bums drank their last breath away,
as the man eating sharks finding their way,
to the over-crowded sandy beaches,
as the man turn to the woman
and gave her a slap across the face,
as the thef steals in the night,
as the coward goes behind his loved ones' backs,
as the oil lanterns spill over and burn the bridges
to salvation and paradise.
Something always happens to the good guy,
a knife in the back in the midst of dawn,
his woman leaving with another man,
he dying slowly of cancer,
or suffering from intoxication of the blood.
Poison. Poison, ravages his body,
oh, how could God let such things happen
to such a good man?
His life work, his social life, his nirvana
all destroied, burned away, turned to dust.
But with the evil, came the good.
Yes with time and time again
repeating itself in a circle of time,
across the crossed faces,
as blue eyed Death smiles
and as the girls grin,
Everything came into place,
Anyway with evil, came the good.
Indeed it had came right to his front doorstep.

dad you were my hero!
the one i wanted to be just like.
everything i did was to make you proud...
you walked out on us...
i know i wasnt a perfect child...
i just wanted to feel love from you
mom always told me that you would be there for me
you were until i disappointed you...
i thought parents were supposed love their children no matter what...
you didnt do that
you always put me down
told me i was such a shame to the family
now that i have grown up
i relieze life is better with out you in it...
and i no longer wanna be just like you
i could never walk out on my kid
you sicken me...
how could you give up the child that you gave your name to...
i understand you have other kids
but to just give up and not have anything to do with one of them
and to not let that kid know his siblings....
i could never do that
no matter how much my kid disappointed me...
i found my hero...
he stepped up even tho he didnt have to...
he treated me like his own...
he was there when i needed a daddy and you werent there...
he was there at my worst....
and he is there at my best...
he will be my best man when i get married...
my kids will know him as grandpa...
they will never know you
cause i cant risk you hurting my kids
the way you hurt me...
the thing that gets me the most is....
how you made it look so easy
did you even think about the lil boy
who carries your name and...
has your blood running in his veins
i dont think you did...
and if you did you are
a heartless piece of crap
even after all you have done to me...
physical, emotional, and mental abuse...
i forgive you...
not for you but for me so i can move on with me life

With my men holding our flag high,
we storm a school and hold the children
captive, handling them like enemy soldiers
they are not, as they cry and scream, some
probably living with trauma for the rest of their lives
“I am a hero of war!’’ Is that what my countrymen think of me?
As smoke of explosions and burning cities fills the air,
we indiscriminately shoot on whoever is coming close
to us, in the end realizing that we have shot mostly
innocent civilians who have nothing to do with the war,
after the smoke has partially cleared out in the air
As I cautiously walk ahead to ensure that all the enemy soldiers are dead, my boots feel a bump; a hand of a woman holding a white flag for peace, as white as snow, with her clothes drenched in blood
“I am a hero of war!” Is that what my countrymen think of me?
Before the sun sets, my men and I sit around
a bonfire and plan our next move and next
attack on the enemy, without realizing that
the enemy is war, brought about by hatred
by people who we call leaders
“I am a hero of war!” Is that what my countrymen think
of me?
Name: Teddy Kimathi
Contest Name: The Poet III

Bow the great dragons, unto the mighty,
Ruler under heaven.
The divine master's iron heel, lies upon the
Serpents neck.
For brilliance illusion a golden throne shines,
Blinding those whom refuse to see the truth.
The trail leading unto the river of blood,
Streaming across a ruined country side.
Striking powers scepter against angers,
Weakest point his own peoples innocent
Beliefs.
How did this tyrant usurper create such,
Beauty with arrogance strangle hold??
A rampaging tiger tightly grappling,
All ends of a concord nation.
Tarring it's inner seams until it bleeds,
Internally leaving it unable to breathe.
Push wide the ancient gates, and behold,
The forbidden city of crimson red.
Sky pillars an archway, holding seemingly,
Up the very heaven's themselves.
In awed amazement beneath the great steps
Of China towards Beijing’s southern most edge.
Lies a glittering palace, of opulence greedy design.
Honor bound at royal bidding's commend,
Living china dolls, porcelain ladies of finest
Quality, his majesty’s playthings.
Green emerald eyes, flash enticing mortals,
To venture beyond safety's threshold.
Meet certain doom for those whom,
Trifled between temptations desire to satisfy,
Lusts insatiable thirsts.
Or honors sacred trust between master and servant.
The lion guards his holy temple ready to strike,
With sharp talons drawn.
Drinking the blood of his vanquished enemies.
But falls unto shame as blackness vail descends
Casting his dark soul unto the four winds of
Destiny.
Even in deaths wake, split by thunder, and
Lightning’s mighty quake.
Doesn't the poised hood cobra lie in wait
To protect this his sacred garden,
In the land of the rising sun.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

A nightmare force me awakened
the tough life
force me awakened...
My dreams come through the walls
light up my dark room
darkens light ones...
My nightmares are plague carriers
dreams of life
sometimes brings death...
In my sleep I have nightmares
when awake I have my thoughts
I'm not sure which is worse...
Often my pillow is an ocean
some nights I drown
in my own tears and hopes...
If I scream wake me
I didn't mean to wake you
it was just a nightmare...
~ ~ ~

My immortal beloved
dusk and thick as night
your dark skin and rolling curls
I have sought for centuries...
The flood from your candid form
flows like a river
my eternal beloved
I feel your past pain of mortality..
I sense the warmth and current
of your deep red blood
I hurl and skew my kisses
like crimson roses of fire...
Your hands touch me
light and cold
sending a shiver through me
we shine with the glory of Luna...
Gift me with your lunar smile
your irises, sullen and chaotic
they flash when they hear my sigh
soaring from deep within my gut...
yes, you my shadow woman
bend your head of black hair
just slightly to one side
drink my blood, heart of hearts...
I will give you everything
and while i'm in agony
you, my love of all loves
draw sustenance from my burning blood...

Fell asleep and couldn't wake up,
Fighting against a black shadow,
Somebody please wake me up,
This shadow holding me down,
Never seen such a thing,
Kicking and screaming as I try to lift myself up,
The shadow strongly holding me,
Still crying out for help,
No one can hear me, but myself,
Repeating to myself this is just a dream,
The spirit finally left,
Someone cut the light on in my room,
Which help me woke up from the danger of doom,
Boy I was so scared,
Really didn't no what to do,
All I can tell you is my dream was true.

the Father visits his son in the dark of day
The son is abed, pale in the light of night
For the sun and moon are witness in this hour of twilight
But the sun is not heat and does not shine as bright
And the moon is not rigid rock
The sun is a warm hope, fading ever so slightly
The moon is softness, the dark is soothing
The son is abed, covers sprawled over his listless form
The son is restless, he doth not sleep
The son is ebbing, his heart does weep
and his Father lifts the covers up tight around his chest
and kisses his brow;
The son blinks wearily, smiles wanly, whimpers meekly
Sleep my son, the Father whispers
But I cannot sleep - Sleep eludes him
I want to play - Rest prances about him
close enough to want, just out of reach
And how can I sleep father? - How can he rest atop this fated bed?
When I wish to wake? - When his heart doth weep restlessly?
the Father wavers, he caresses the son's brow, but not his heart
For the heart is within, the caress without,
Rest my son, he says, rest and forget
The Father, gently, lovingly, pulls the covers up, tight around the son's neck
But father, father why
My heart will not sleep
Five more minutes? Just five.
Sleep son, the hour is late, the time is neigh
And the Father, always lovingly, he pulls the covers tight over the son, and lowers him into
the ground.

on cloud nine it seems
gravity pulls me back down
to the moon’s sunbeams
the magnitude forcing a frown
there’s a certain purpose for the trial
knowing somewhere down the line there’s a real trail
but even thinking of trying is a fail
a nervous wreck in the midst of space
oxygen flows, but it’s out of trace
hypnotic doubt overwhelms the soul
that sort of mechanical happiness is taking its toll
and the fumes of assumptions
consume me
like the brain is loading its function
rhymes a wreck down the railroad of chaos
high on sadness the eyes droop
some sort of animal-human cross
meshed in this never-ending lump of goop
philosophic gamma rays pierce the x-ray
visions pass—the eyes dull gray
disheartened generations gaze in a lightening phase
struck eternally in this world of a maze
fashion me on high
and I swear I will end up down below
where the moon-struck sun beats down and says goodbye
to the smile of our darkest foe

You and I built empty things
empty sounds that drip, dripped
down bathroom sinks
Gone stale in damp mountains of towels
that sulked resentfully behind doors
I listened to the tick, tick of a soundless clock
that moved up and down
with our childrens' breath
Your 3 AM skin dark and warm in your nest
While I am inanimate like stone
You and I made empty things
that lived in corners, in dark, dark coffee stained surrender
And I never cease to wonder
How deep the cellar stairs went down
How deep, deep
and tender.

Sometimes
I feel like I'm stood on the edge of a cliff
swaying too and throw
in a icy cold biting wind
staring down
at the dark deep caesium below
never knowing
from one moment to another
which way I'll go.
Hoping someone
will come along
and reach out and grab my hand
and save me.
but until then
I stand here and sway.
Peter Dome.copyright.2012.

Strong self-regulation plays a role as the character named tenet
She stands on a human imperfection as being unequal
The silence which tries to wriggle in a surge of life
Successfully tickled her peace, her serenity
Try to wash away all the black and white under her consciousness
Private figure imprisoned her in mirage
She opens her eyes and tear down all the walls
Stand on the insecurity she found her self in hollow...
Drowning in a sea of fears...
The brutality of words rape her morality
They took those pictures of her and replaced her into a limbo
She lives unsteadily, she wished to be saved
Blindness was coming later along with the beautiful paradise but fake ...
This crisis did not stop ...
Shout through the empty space
She began to dissolve within her nature
For the implication of silence had rotten
Deep abyss creates her in bitter and sore....

Long ago, in this white room,
They bring me here everyday.
All the halls and rooms are clean.
Every night, one person disappears,
Leaving only a few to stay.
Tapping sounds walk down the hall,
As the second twin continues on.
He smiles at me for a last time,
A laugh and a chainsaw echoes along,
But ends before the clock strikes dawn.
Soon it will be my turn to visit,
The room where red flowers grow.
The gardener there will greet me,
With a very kind smile,
And then look below.
The dog in the garden eats so much,
And he comes forth when a small,
Lovely red sphere rolls down.
I can’t wait for my turn to come,
When I get to walk down the hall.
It is me…It is me…It is me…
It is me…It is me…It is me…
It is me…It is me…It is me…
IT-

Death and its mournful tidings
Obituaries and eulogies, read
Black ties and black veils, all in rows
Surround this shell and the open earth
The cold, damp wind sashays through and through
Memories, half a century old are lost and forgotten
A flight of geese overhead, perform a last flyover
Victory in death
Vestiges of family, say farewell and Godspeed
Tomorrow brings colder and damper weather

In the inner most
Deepest depths,
you tortured me
until there was no beauty left
A vile monster
with lying tongues
In my ocean deep
You became slimy
You attacked me
without a heart
Hurting me
In the depths
Creeping like seaweed
all around me
Covering your lies
Disguised as truth,
leaving a horrible stench
In my ocean
Piece by piece
In tearing through the crack
Reaching for the light of truth
Barely able
To breathe
You will not drown me
With your loveless heart
The tide is turning
You no longer smell sweet
I see a monster
Buried deep
You left your scar
Your vile treatment
In the stench of hurt
Looking to the heaven's
I bled for you
you chose
To put me in hell

You are the sunshine
On a cold day
That warms my skin
And makes me smile
You are the starlight
On a dark night
That shines through
And guides me
You are the trees
On a depressing day
That soothes my soul
And holds me tight
You are my mother
On every day
That loves me
And cares about me
I am your daughter
For the rest of my life
Who will always love you
And always follow your lead
Without you
I am a dark day
I am a starless night
I am a dying tree
You hold me together
You help me through
And you guide me
You are there
When I need you
When I yell at you
When I push you away
You will always be there
And I will always be here
Forever and ever
With all the love and care

This is a poem to those who think thinkfull;
whose thinkwrite, thinkthink, thinkprose, thinkcopy, thinkulate, thinkcujol
as a full member's fool.
My, me, mine contests are the bestest, contestest, behestest gorestest
since I'm a poet that's hosting, and ur the poet degenerate that's posting.
This makes me in copulocommand and u in dildodemand. Hitherto inconsequential.
My criteria is susperia, whattheheria and scary as hell, because I know not
what I'm doing and which wreaks, of, Oh well!
It's funny to seewrite yr crap as something u think poetcool,
but in poetreality on my site, it is only poetgruel,
as u lack the real innate streaming talent (dollars/cents to be true)
to tintilate, as yr soul it waits for retooling.
Don't fret for u can be me, and all that's wordly fruitful and free.
just pay the right price for lifetime linear refooling!
For it's then our poetic equation becomes wordglue
equazic for it's momentary monetary meger word sequestration.

Eyes closed I see
shapeless shadows moving
hurrying at times but lazy
A fire burning at a front
acid burning in a crooked line
changing something, refining
A steady wing blowing from NE
a man with his head on fire
wind carrying the fire to burn dead wood
hear music soaring beyond and
above melody and harmony
not from a known genre or instrument known to man
The torso of a woman in fetal position
no arm nor legs, but smiling
long dark hair moving in a breeze
becoming a river of angels moving
through stormy clouds
Eyes open I see
shapeless shadows moving about
hurrying at times but lazy
Get a hunch of dark times coming
of earthquakes and firestorms
and of an abundance of goodness
to come.

I am a hypocrite and look what I just did:
I fell into my darkest pit; now, again, and again.
I thought that I was strong enough to live the truths I said;
Now I realized I'm much too weak; a fool too ashamed to raise his head.
God, please save me, please forgive me, and please give me strength.
I love You.
I thank You.
I am forever changed.

BURN AWAY
We have all lost our way
To see starlight gazers
And men with broken hearts,
Seeking love in all of the wrong places;
Vacant lots, where women all looking for something,
But not quite knowing what they look for.
We have all lost our way.
The only hope of humanity
Is the shining sun
That breaks through the blinds of my window,
And the faint memory of me and her
Lying on our backs in a grassy meadow,
Holding hands
Looked up and counted stars.
Cities burn away,
Sky, stars, moon, sun all burn away;
The grassy meadow
Where we once lay, all burns away
Everything burns away,
Memory and desire and love all burn away
With the snap of a finger, and a new man
In her own life,
And I burn away.
A picture of her hung high and praised,
A picture of me, in a dark box
That collects dust, in some lonesome
And dusty, cobweb infested attic.
And I burn away with a new day.
I burn away.
A nightmare that I can’t awake from,
It is endless and repeats
When thoughts of her are all over my mind,
I cannot take such nightmarish reality
Too see her and smile,
And she walks away without a trace
Of ever returning.
And I cry,
And I burn away,
The tears wash the fire away,
And turn me to ash,
The wind picks me up and takes me away.
And for one peaceful moment,
I do not cry,
I do not burn away.
For a moment I am happy
And I smile,
And go away for a while
And let them all sleep in peace.
-10/2/2013-

You cut me out of your life
I’ll butcher you out of mine
Chop chop chop chop
There go the memories
The images
With one fell swoop
I've decapitated your smile
CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP
There go the words
Torn away like extra slabs of fat
Oh…yes, there go the juicy chunks of
sentiment
I had for you
Those I didn't chop
Those I sawed away...
Chainsawed
So the blood splattered everywhere
And made me sick
To the core
What a fool I've been
Slice Slice Slice Slice
Deep into the red meat of the heart
Slicing away every reminder
Of your touch
And every word
Every look
That made me smile
And go weak inside
YES….blood drenched and gory
I pick up what’s left of your image
And douse it in acid
…………..
I nearly suffocate in the fumes
Tit for tat
But I did better than that
I didn't cut you out of my life
I butchered you out of existence….
Ah…much better now!
I’m smiling….
With blood red tears
Rolling down my cheeks.
Eileen Manassian Ghali

I remember her hair
long black and beautiful
dark yet with golden light
in the length of it.
So lovely, liquid and glorious
the luxurious smell of her hair
scented with springtime
jasmine and magnolia.
It has been weeks now
renewed visions of pleasure
what I write is true
I knew the sweet splendor of love.
Calm as a second summer
tonight I see a star
why is it now that i see
just now.
I write for her this poem that begins
with I love you and ends with I love you
somewhere in the middle is a good by
for all the times I hurt her....

When Thomas went down on Sally
did he curse the weakness
of his white flesh or did he see
her dark thighs as his due?
Did he forget all his philosophy,
or try to use it to justify his lust,
or did he love,
without reserve?
When Sally went down on Thomas,
did she curse her weakness
for white privilege or did she see
her dark thighs as a trap?
Did she forget all her loyalties,
or try to use them to justify her lust,
or did she love,
without reserve?

In the edge of darkness the mind has strange thoughts
As to what lurks behind things not seen
We can imagine the worse in our minds
Or simply sit back and listen to the sounds of the night
On the other hand we can have it give us fright
In the edge of darkness we can remain calm and cool
And drink in the dark surrounding our soul
What we cannot see can have the imagination
Hang on a bare thread
The heart can have a moment where it feels
Like hammers drumming a solo beat
Running scared and not sure from what
Take the beauty of the night now --- imagine
The full moon hanging low from the heavens
The stars twinkling lighting up the skies
The beauty of the northern lights dancing
Truly a spectacular view
So from sinister to it's own dark beauty
The night remains just what it seems to you.
21/07/12

This is the story
Of the silent killer
It makes you feel
Like a pointless knife
A fruitless flower
Or a wingless bee
It forces the tears
From your eyes
As you cry
It becomes a way of life
There's that blade
That you want to hold
You want to cut and
Make a wound
The pain is sweet
And as you bleed
You internally scream
And shout
For another way out
And think about your brain
It's tired of all the pills
Tired of all the pain
And sickness you blame
Yourself for it
But it's just a disease
And you wouldn't believe
Anyone that told you that
You'll be okay

Dropped out of school
At an early age
Lived on the streets
Because, I disgusted my mother
She thought I was a poor example
Of true Christian beliefs
At an early age
She religiously drummed into me
‘blood is thicker than water’
And yet,
Here I am today confused, lonely and hungry
No one protecting me
No friends
No family
No home to go too
Just, peoples eye for an eye,
tooth for a tooth mentality
Praying for the sun to shine
To feel some warmth again!
Sun rays of hope, lighting me up
To live through this darkness without fear
With a heart full of faith
No matter what happens to me, now!
If only I could drink my salty tears
It would sustain me for a lifetime
Your tears are worth nothing, around here
You’re classed as weak and venerable
Only attracting death
Your life worth nothing!
Save me from myself
I am my best friend
I am my worst enemy
My prayers and dreams
Lost in the wind
Blowing around like autumn leaves
The rain washing them away
Down the drain into the sewage
Rolling with the seasons
Year after year
Survival for the fittest!
Surviving on the love
Hidden, inside me
Being my strength and guide
My personal lifeline
In surviving this crazy world
We all live in

I click the dark gates again,
As if the dark winds have spun black threads around their fingers,
Their magic drives me towards the emptiness,
I know my soul inside craves for light,
My lips have been closed with locks of horror,
The keys have been thrown deep inside my throat,
Neither can I cry for help, neither can I swallow the keys,
What misery will befall on such a desolate man. When hell bribed him,
For the place in heaven.

A Storm's Wrath
thunder from dark, dark skies once were they brilliant blue
swirling are the leaves that mighty wind has now thrown
buckets of cold hard rain the starved earth does quench
as gliding winged eagles do fly among the darkened clouds
strong waves of storm's might pushing them soaring all about
as lightning strikes objects resting tall upon sodden ground
life marvels at Nature's massive stormy blasts and loud show
hiding now are the creatures that earlier were out to play
spiteful wind rips the trees that stand defiantly in it's way
floods fill the deep burrows where so many wild critters hide
with no fear of Nature's wrath and it's dark, stormy wet ride
time stops Nature's wrath slowly gliding along it's endless path...
Robert L. 05-13-2014

Let Me Go!
I don't want this anymore!
I can't go to sleep at night,
all I seem to do is write.
Sometimes I read...
I read until I finish.
When I finally go to sleep,
I hear the sound of the alarm "BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!"
Oh gosh,
I can't handle this anymore.
I am going crazy here
and no one seems to notice it, my dear.
I cry myself to sleep.
telling myself everything will get better.
BUT IT DOESN'T!
And I know I mustn't
but I want that knife
just as much as I want that gun
I hate this world
and everything about this girl
She sings and tries to get attention
yet no one gives her the time of day.
She falls into the books she reads
no one knowing, it is escaping, she pleads.
This girl is me,
oh but you knew, right?
Since all I ever talk about is me!
Gosh, can't you see?
I'm my enemy!
I'm my own nightmare!
No one is hurting me!
It is me who shouldn't be let free!
Lock me up!
Kill me!
That way I won't harm myself...
I'd like it if it was someone else
Please, do me the favor
and let me go
for no one can save this girl
from this cruel world.

Down in to the darkness deep
Slowly and delicately I now edge
In to the warmth so cold and bleak
In to the womb I once resided
In the mother I’d idolized
Wondering what did happen
Wondering what had changed
What had caused such death?
To cause such pain?
Still slowly moving, sneaking,
I started faintly weeping
Why would we cause this?
Why did we not see?
Still I inch, well tears did fall
Till a light I did spy
Till a sprig I now cradle
Now I see, as I gently stop my deplore,
My mother will forgive
All the hurt,
The hate,
All the people that did denounce,
All she has provided
All that she cherishes
Yet she now grants;
Redemption
Forgiveness
Unconditional love
All in the loud roar
Of spring

In the dark cold sea of life,
I was on the small boat rowing alone
coming from nowhere and going to nowhere,
The skies above me were cloudy,
And the silence that overwhelmed the place was unbearable.
Nothing was likely to happen to break the silence down,
But because my whole life was written on the old cold stone
I happened to find you,
I found the universal unspoken language used by everyone,
Both on the Earth down and in the heavens above.
It´s a beautiful language that flows from the heart.
Something older than humanity,more ancient than the sea,
Something that exerts the same force whenever two pairs of eyes meet.
I found you love,
I found you steady, confident and subtle.
O Love !!!
You enlighten my darkness,
You warm up my coldness,
You make me suffer though
O Love !!!
You have the power to heal,
You have the power to kill
And you have the power to turn into eternity a mere moment of life
O Love !!!
The murmur of your words in my ears,
makes me feel a woman,
makes me forget about me.
O Love !!!
Your words take me up to the highest heavens without wings,
Without Sinbad’s rugs.
Abruptly I find myself back in the cold sea of life.
O Love !!!
Your words build me a kingdom of illusion,
in which I dwell very few moments
to find myself again alone in the dark sea of life.
Yes, this is you Mr Love, a great "ignis fatuus",
O you who plays with the air the symphony of my life,
Turn my turmoils into lyrics and sing them out aloud.
To no soul, to no crowd.

"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one.
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Her sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed.
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent.
A meager thought
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
Her curse.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows,
"Save them."

Here I found a cruel necessity for a new, chilling ambience
There was even a need for the drifting fogs of dreary past
A need for the blurred emptiness that sadness elates
An unimpeded appetite for a long lost banister of emotional distain
Negative pores glimmered petulantly on polluted shores
Drawn to an irrefutable cloud of looming gloom
Swollen was the tide of crestfallen reveries—ashen treasuries
There in that dark, empty room of ill refute
I felt the word ‘alone’ in a new shade of gray
I felt sincerely barren—I hesitate to say
Yes, I welcomed the weak ray of diminishing hope
I disposed of lurid happiness to gamble with tragedy
I both lost and gained
I was both enlightened and degraded
And all else in between
Images sustained their displays on my burning canvas
Lighting up merely to blacken and destroy
Weeping for the sake of weeping alone
I grasped onto the disturbing unknown
And spat upon my inane, dull, idealistic parables
Never meant for meaning or demeaning
Only remained then was a desperately distilled and angry fright
It was this fright alone that pushed me more to account
That pushed me to curse my every being
For daring to weep for the sake of weeping
Was a personal sin at best blessed
There in that slowly illuminating room
That slowly blackening burning room
I both lost and gained
I was both dead innocent and garishly guilty
And all else in between

Thief
Is it hiding behind the curtain,
or in the silence of the night,
that dreadful dumb thief,
which comes often to steal a life.
Seeds are sown and cultivated,
when grown are killed with a sickle,
so are bonds incessently nurtured,
and broken with inevitable jerk.
The face which gave another a laugh,
is often the first victim,
a healthy hen is slaughtered,
much before the diseased one.
Should one renounce these bonds,
or possess the power to fight it,
the thief is far from our catch,
with it lies the power of providence.

I let you open the box I sealed shut
I let you into a dark corner
I showed you the hidden
I gave you the piece of me
The piece I kept to myself
I poured out my heart and soul
I revealed things about me
I’ve never breathed a word about
You saw me, broken and beautiful
You saw the scars, the pain, the tears
You saw through my masks
You saw the real me
You loved the real me
The good, the bad and everything in between
I could never hide my struggles
We could laugh about mundane things
Cry together when we hurt
Pray together when we knew of nothing else
Call upon each other in time of need
Enjoy each other’s company
You showed me what it’s like
To have a real friendship
The kind people are jealous of
And wish they were so lucky to have
You changed my life
You helped me see things with new eyes
I knew of your dark past
The pain and abuse you endured
I knew what haunted you still
I loved you the same
I prayed for you until I ached
I cried for you until I couldn’t cry anymore
Then you hurt me
You ripped out my heart
And the piece of me I gave you
You locked away and took with you
You turned me upside down
You planted bitterness and anger
Rooted deep inside me
Back in my dark corner
I crawl back and plant myself
Weary to let anyone close
Weary to let anyone in
I cry now for what you took
I cry now for what I lost
I pray now to be healed
I pray now for your eyes to open
I handed you my heart on a platter
And you raked it into the trash
All in a one day
Because I stepped outside
Outside your boundaries
That you placed on your life
And I messed up your world
Forget that I need you now
Forget that it is me that is struggling
Forget that it was me that’s been hurt
Now you are the victim
I must wear the hat of the villain
I pray that one day
You realize what you did
As I sit here thinking
Tears well in my eyes
At the thought of what we had
What I found in you
The memories we built together
I still miss you
I still love you
But my heart you shattered
I’ve never hurt so much
As you hurt me
The tears I’ve shed
The feeling of being incomplete
When you feel and trust
When you give and share
You risk this
Risk it all being taken for granted
Risk it all
For what
For this emptiness?

Poverty is realised in the mother's womb
It dogs the poor till his tomb
Sucking the breast does not bring relief
Lack of food plays the mischief
The child cries for food
But many more mouths await in the same mood
Hunger is like a smouldering fire
To feed oneself is human's main desire
Luxuries are things that are far fetched
Fate brings only misery and pain to the wretched
Hardships in life make of kids thieves
Out of frustration many in vandalism find relief
To work for a decent salary is man's dream
Food, shelter and clothing hearts scream
Values and principles all fade out
The poor forgets that crime pays without doubt
Stealing for the empty stomach becomes their fate
For many life's goal is meal on a plate
Employment and jobs are hard to find
Destiny's wheels are designed only to grind

Searing pain rips through my chest,
As I slip on the painted green stairs,
Running from something I’m not sure
Too afraid to stop, to turn my head.
My heart races, my head throbbing,
If I could just take a deep breath,
To cleanse my soul and refresh,
Where is this dark building I’m in.
Lying in warmth I move my hand,
Red covers me, flowing down the steps,
A peaceful calm envelopes as I view
My Dad with open arms waiting for me.
He is standing now, out of his wheelchair,
Smiling with his crooked grin so sweet,
The pain ebbs and happiness grows
Then I wake again to the dark emptiness.
Written September 23, 2012
For Francine Robert’s contest
“In Dreams”

I kneel in my bedroom
A nubby knit blanket softens the wood under my knees ankles toes
I take the thin black cap of dark red polish—
The color my mom said no to when I was young
The dark of a girl’s shadow on a wall, a lamp draped in scarlet silk
I bend forward and make careful strokes
The Shangri-Las “Paradise” comes on shuffle
I become conscious of the world’s spin—
The shifting of the people money feelings wind time and endless wastelands, tumble
My head sways, I know the moment
I let a red drop slide down my thigh
I am happy to be held in my body—
Surrounded by the madness of being alive.

The dark season of cold, pallid vastness
Has not broken the tenacity
Of the first snow fall
Heralding the purity of the colorless
And the aroma of burning pine
This opaque mood I am in
Rejoices for the dark season
Yellow and brown ochre highlights
Burnt umber trees of plasticine
Molded by the hands of nature
In my mind, I am alone in this one-way reality
And yet, I delight for the dark season
If I could share this sensation, I would not
For it’s the prelude to a poem
About a cold and distant soul

To Take Notice
When we see the moon light up at midday
we look up and take notice
for it stands out as being different
for the day before it appeared as the sun went down
so we did not notice
just seeing things as everyday motions
while many never take time to look up
to see any of the beauty surrounding
how everyday is created and a blessing to view
This is how the holy spirit shall work
when one shall call upon Jesus
asking for forgiveness and guidance
knowing they need Jesus more than anything
then some will stop and look at you
trying to figure out what it is they see different
not being the same person as the day before
the blinds over the eyes will be lifted
then to be molded and guided
to a new creation
as the moon lit up at midday
watching as time passes by
it gets brighter and brighter
giving a light to the dark world
therefore we shall be called out
to give light
to the dark world

My eyes refuse to see the night
simply as a Cimmerian shade of day
Not because I am afraid of it...
As a child, you fear going into even
a dimly lit room in your own home
because of the monsters in your
closet or under your bed
As I grew older, I ceased to believe
they lived in such places in my room,
but in the shadows of alleyways or parks
I no longer fear the dark nor the
monsters in my room, but
the monsters which hide in the world outside

Follow the Yellow Brick Road
So the song say
Follow it, follow it on down to something
Something good to make your day
Follow the Yellow Brick Road
To your own personal OZ, your own land of fantasy
And leave behind the cold harsh logical truth
of the cruel world known as reality
Come all and live in a world where you have the power
To mold it however you see fit
Shape your fantasy into a world where you and whomever
Can properly fit in it
To live in a dream world with no, pain, no suffering
No drowning in past sorrows
Just to look forward
to the brightness of tomorrow
Where the people are smiling standing together
All equals side by side
Not one face is hanging in shame
But held high with pride
The buildings reaching higher and higher
Oh Lord look how they reach so high
The birds sing their song as they move
through the sky
But sadly, like every story that is steep
in the genre of fantasy
The time came too fast, it quickly passed
Your dream world of joy turns upside down
into something dark and downright scary
Your colorful world turns dismal ash
The people are no longer smiling, Their
just cold blank lifeless faces
Crowding in various worn out places
and spaces
Where did the joy go. What brought this depressing atmosphere
you thought you've escaped from.
But in your growing despair, you haven't noticed
there's more dread to come
The buildings are crumbling
The yellow brick road is breaking
The people are disappearing
Your wonderful Metropolis is fading
You become frighten, nay
you become frantic
You look for a way out
Oh Lord where is the exit
Then the ground caves in
right where you're standing
And now you're falling
and falling
falling
Grasping for anything, screaming for anyone listening
Now you've fallen into the dark maelstrom
of nothing, completely lost, forevermore vanishing
What a way to go. A downer, bittersweet ending
to this sad sad story
What is the moral of it all
Pray
Pray that you don't get lost in the evanescent land of Fantasy

I think she played me
on the playground
juggled like a ball
makes me wonder
why is the world so cold?
Some nights I lay in bed
and ask the Lord
why do we suffer in heart?
time moves so slow
when you try and forget someone.
Forget about someone
who was supposed to be
separated from her husband
turned out to be no good.
Then I woke up and realized
love is not a fairy tale
just get tired of these wounds
would like to close the doors.
All started out as such a good time
a smile that turned to be a broken heart
the chemistry that pulled us together
begin to pull us apart.
Sometimes the illusions we see
are only make believe
we just want to be held
and say sweet things
with candy in our mouth.
So, I've been played
right on the playground
kicked like a volley ball
taken as a joke...
~

i've been quiet too long i need to be vocal
while i remain drug free and teetotal
a blade is something i need to be close to
need a magic telescope i can see hope through
first time i did it.age 15 when my dad died
i swear my pen and pad cried
they were jealous i had a new "friend"
i just wanted my pain to end
my parents gave me away to strangers
growing up in care
filled with pain,sadness and anger
only the blade was there
i had no one to talk to
only my Nikes understand what i had to walk through
it seems once you do it
the blade seems to stalk you
don't ask how could i do it to myself
when no one knows the pain i felt
everyday being called a freak and emo
i was lost.but you were too busy trying to find Nemo
please tell me more about the attention i'm seeking
when i was going through it
not once did i ever mention or speak it
my pain and hurt forced me to do it
i haven't self harmed in over 2 years
overcome all of my pain hurt and fears
relapsing is the only fear i have left
but before i do that i'll of reached my death

I wandered in blissful darkness;
My arm outstretched,
Hanging in limbo.
The hardwood floors creaked beneath me.
The rain pattered patiently on the glass
As though asking to be let in
To make acquaintance with my sodden breath.
So dark the woes of man are laid!
Arranged in a social hierarchy,
And in alphabetical order!
I glance around (a useless gesture)
Examining the room
In search of light
(The dimmest glimmer of hope would suffice)
Aimlessly;
Thirsty (despite the wetness in the air)
For lustrous knowledge.
Directed only by minor gusts of wind
Blowing me hither and thither,
I wander in blissful darkness;
My arm outstretched
Cluelessly.
And whilst the serenity of the unknown
Pacifies my mind in the midst
Of this hypnotic eve,
My Thirst re-emerges
And rapidly drives me to lunacy.
Yea, the midnight siren
Renders this illusion vaster—
Far beyond its substantial boundaries.
For in reality the Room is small,
Cramped,
And teeming with conflict—
A conflict of beliefs;
Until all truths are lost
And the surreal is re-inhabited.
The dark Room we wander in
(The reality of the blissful darkness)
With ours arms outstretched,
Bumping into furniture.

Come inside weary nomad
Concede your effects there
Demands that of once greatness
My frail frame shifts in command
Subtly do I settle my tome
Within his allotted collection
Barren mind remains
Erased is all knowledge
Press further to truth
Come inside exhausted warrior
Concede your arms there
Demands that of once innocence
My frail hands move in command
Reluctantly do I discard my weapons
Within his cluttered armory
Empty sheath remains
Removed are all defenses
Press further to truth
Come inside fragile soul
Concede your garments there
Demands that of once love
My vulnerable being shakes in command
Disheartenedly do I delete my outfit
Within his convoluted bed chamber
Bare body remains
Stripped is my life
Press further to truth
Come inside mutilated man
Concede your torment there
Demands that of a unique soul
My heart weeps in command
Completely do I extract my pain
Within her purified passion
Past spirit remains
Revitalized is my mind
Press further to truth
Press further pure love

Even behind your house
darkness falls all the way down
to the ground in dirt
with many arms you
try to grasp reality
suction cups in mind
guilt takes a walk
on the wild side
inhibitions take a hike
freedom reigns until
your conscience tastes salt again
on lips moist and tender
heat rises and the gritty
satin sheets love stained
blowing in the wind
like the song of
long ago are begging
for the answer
the question
beckons:
is the falling
gritty darkness growing?

The Crusades Began a Holy War
Which Continues to this Day.
We Kill, and Kill, and Now it Seems,
This shall Always be the Way.
One Side Scores, the Others Die,
Then the Cycle is Repeated.
It never Stops, It’s never Done;
The Battles Grow More Heated!
The Way to Peace, it Seems so Clear,
Is not Through Senseless Slaughter.
I Appeal to All, “Please Quit the Fight!”
Save our Sons and Daughters!
To Find Our Way out of the Dark,
We Need only Seek the Light.
A Solution Lies within our Grasp:
Forget who’s Wrong or Right!
This God or that, it Makes no Matter.
This Truth I have Acquired:
Be they Different, or the Same,
The Gods would Preach Cease Fire!

-Night and day-
A tug and pull of lovers never entwined,
-Beauty and force-
The caress and the crave,
As the sun fades beneath the dawn
And the light slowly retreats
The night, edging forward
Seeking to touch, to grasp
But too late, as the light fades away:
And it is here… the darkness has settled-
And the dark is omnipresent
A depth of universe
So vast, so full of stars and worlds
So enshrouding, a blanket of secrets and untold deeds
So grand and great
So mighty, unquestionable
Inevitable
For the dark to encroach, encompass and overwhelm;
This night
It stands all around us
With no peers or equals
The light long gone, long faded
And the night, it waits till the fawning of the sun
The first sign of light
To fade away
Alone, every night
In its grandeur,
Alone.

.
The suspicious mind,
like dark sunglasses,
even on a sunny day,
projects its own tint,
paints its own distrust
on everyone around,
seeing you and me
as mere dark shadows
of its own dark image
and shadowy likeness.
.

When stars are falling, the moon's exploding into the night time sky
I turn to look for that familiar face, but you're not by my side
I bite my lip, try not to cry, and turn my gaze back towards the sky
It's beauty once warmed me but now I'm cold
Like the touch of a corpse, growing old
My temper is shorter, my emotions are dragging, being pushed along through mud
I walk, I trip and fall to the ground, distracted I fall with a thud
I get up and wipe myself off, I take a deep breath and look around
A bird in the night sings a beautiful note, just loud enough to hear
I follow its song along through the woods, till I'm closer near
The forest is lonely, not safe anymore
I run and I run, but I crave more
The beauty is fading into a deadly nightmare
I'm trying to search for you but you're just not there
A pile, a heap, of torn butterfly wings, where I settle down to lie
But no further I will continue this poem, for I don't wish to make you cry

"I shall be telling this with a sigh"
Robert Frost, The Road Less Travelled.
~
I had a mother once
With long dark hair
Whose candle faded,
but not her flame
The light she left inside my heart
Is still alive, forever glowing
It flickers softly in the dark
It chases shadows from my dreams
And comforts me, and softly keeps me
warm and safe,
and whispers love that does not leave me
It somehow knows when darkness swallows me
that soon the blush of morning follows
It tucks me in, and lightens my dread
and with warm breath, will kiss my head
Then tells me
"Hush, hush little sweet one....,
...go back to sleep"

A fragile mind breaks
Wake upon the rock laden shores
A muffled heart begs to echo
Whispers lost among a velvet chamber
Dusk comes premature time and again
Dropping the curtain on an optimistic sunrise
If you never witness dawn
There is no tomorrow
Always the dreamer aches
Never awake to make real what he desires
The restless corpse walks blind
Dead ends seem fitting for one of the kind
Lost in the labyrinth of strangling vines
Love is the motive and the weapon
Taking root in throats dry from weeping
Sprouts of amnesia in place of smiles
A garden called heartbreak holds onlookers captive
The comfort takes hold, sets in the bones weary of searching
A plea for rest lands on deaf ears
The hollow boy tires of himself
The last request he will ever make
"End me"
Lost and tired
He wishes to be weak no more

I've been accused.
Blood, Death& Hate
The crimes to which
my Words stand witness.
I've been accused.
Of imprisoning my smile
In the lock of a frown,
Drowning my laughter
in the tempest of unshed tears.
I've been accused.
Being doubtful
of the Benefit of the Doubt.
A life sentence
Chained to the Temple of the Almighty Cynic.
Under oath, I will confess.
It wasn't attempted murder nor theft
Rather Attempted Happiness.
The goal of an Ode to Merriment
was soon forgot
As my thoughts drifted back to
The Gang Melancholy
And my pen scribbled(once again!)
Blood, Death& Hate.
Verdict: Guilty as Charged.
Y.L Ndlovu

self imposed prison captivates a song bird
stumbling over insecure formation of the wrong word
stabalizing foundation atop false ground
deception dressed to impress in a tall gown
quietly with humming embedding a soft sound
fooling with the friendly touch of a small town
is the big city snake born and bred in the pits
released from it's cage around seven or six

Dark as the night goddess, she is an ebony princess,
Blackest beauty whom sheds layers textures, as veils
Cast upon the breath of the night winds.
She the temptress enchantress, passion's desire burns
Within, these emerald eyes of seductions flame.
Fallen have men, and gods into shadow, faded by
Thus empress of the dark arts Magi.
Woven spells of intrigue entice the innocent,
To play deadly games of the lost, ending paradise
Illusions, but oh how they dream still, within
The realm of her kingdom.
Beware those of fragile soul, the black maiden's waltz
It is a singular pulse, beating at the heart of darkness,
Alive spiritual being, is she known as black.
The sun fell in love, with the first rays of the dawn,
Forlorn she cried unto the moon eclipse, and so he did
Comfort her, shielding thus within his embrace.
The child was given forth from their union,
Is she, black.
Royalties clinging robes, cover thus all in twilight’s
Faded hour, beauties most fair, inhales all light,
By shades quilting blanket, with the woven stars
Lain ever so gently amongst the heavens themselves.
Here she sits on golden throne, that orbits the universal
Immortals, casting dreams enchantments in a mystical,
Plan known only to her majesty, black.
Throw passions rose petal unto her temple pools,
Pray thee young lovers for blessings approval,
To thus goddess, the keeper of loves devotional
Faith.
In the ivory bricked temple of black, desires
Lustful heart of men, so is judged by the queen
Of enchantments, thy guardian of the dammed.
Oh beware the whitest rose left alone,
May be red at mornings first rays of light,
Or torn to shreds, leaving only a stem behind,
This goddess of silent fate, holds the answers,
And she only speaks in whispers by night.,
In her world of illusions, black after all
Is the dreaming goddess.
BY: CHERYL ANNA DUNN

The past is always
the past
I often forget it
but it remembers me
everything I failed to be
yesterday is history...
The past is a ghost
a hole, dust, the wind
it is dark and moves unseen
beneath, betwixt and between
angels, demons, elemental spirits
come to me when I am sleeping...
Ghosts from my past
makes my thoughts
heavy as branches
after a raging storm
leaving me tired and forlorn
people who came before me
appear in dreams
In a way
we are all ghosts...
~ ~ ~

glassy-eyed people
moving as in a dream
looking without seeing
seeing without looking
utter hopelessness
pervading their insides
filling them with despair
and pessimism
lustreless eyes
no inner joy
just a deep emptiness
stifling their souls
dried-up people
shutting others out
shutting themselves in
lost in their loneliness

Are we awake or are we still sleeping?
Blind to the hurt, and deaf to the weeping.
Ashamed of religion and supportive of the new,
Aware of the lies and hidden from what’s true.
Worship the evil and turn away the pure,
Developing disease with an unknown cure.
Starving the poor and overfeeding the wealthy.
Killing the sick and drugging the healthy.
Going to war for some kind of power,
Building tall structures over all types of flower.
Cutting the trees and polluting the air,
All out of greed, with no sort of care.
Turning us against our own,
And help from up above.
Making us beings of hate,
Instead of ones of love.
Demonizing the mystic,
Criticizing the wise.
Making our own family members,
Into people that we despise.
Awaken to the torment,
Be aware of all the pain.
Those who are misleading,
And claiming that we are insane.

I wanted to be
warmed by her fire
she came so close
then turned her face away.
The distant forest
of her brown beauty
became a lightness of being
I wrote her love poems
showing her the origins
of my inner fire
she turned away
leaving me with only
the ashes of her trees
and trembling leaves.
I promised her not castles
or prophesy of the future
to love now is what I needed
tomorrow may be too late
I said, "love me now"
"now love me."
Her fire is now so distant
and the forest she showed me
I love her in absentee
dreaming her while awake
she said she loved me
I who thought I was her master...
~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I am beggar
I am thief
I am Eve
Buried by belief
I am leader
I am breeder
I am Adam
Narcissistic feeder
I lie inside the doorway
Unable now to die
I see the tortured infant
Yet still I cannot cry
Was drafted for the Nam
Saw sixty thousand dead
They read the dead a psalm
And then the worms were fed
I fought for love of country
Unable there to die
The death of friends and comrades
And still I'm asking why
I've been a rogue receiver
And a dark and doomed deceiver
As I swam between two Islands
In the sea of coral jade
I walked through misty highlands
In the land of heat and grief
A soldier without purpose
Who had lost his own belief
I've lived so many lifetimes
As I turned most every trick
I lost my chance at right times
'Cause I played the game too quick
I'm buried by the burden
Of my sorrow and my shame
For I was once surrounded
And surrendered to the game
Sisters of sincerity
Released me from all blame
They know the fleeting nature
Of this sad and fickle fame
I've won some feeble fortunes
That still fuel the fire and flame
No matter now what happens
I will find another game
The words of every prophet
And the hardships of the lame
The lepers left untreated
As their blood boils down the drain
I seem to find the station
But I never find the train
And every destination
Seems to find the pouring rain
I'm walkin' through the valley
Filled with sorrow and a tear
I'm deep into a forest
As the dark is drawing near
Some soldiers at the front
Some marching to the rear
I'm treading holy water
And I need to have you here
Now listen to me sweetness
It is time for me to leave
My mind is moving far too fast
For me to stop and grieve
Remember that the Universe
Is far beyond a creed
And man is just a minute part
Of Universal seed
I know I've done my giving
To my friends and kindred dear
It is the part of living
That can make it all so clear
I'm off to find the truth
Before I lose my youth
And if a truth be found
It's through your patience so profound
And now we've said our last goodbyes
Yet not a tear falls from my eyes
But just before I go to sleep
Will be my time to weep
For love and long emotion
Is the potion for devotion
Look at me
Pretty woman
Can't you see
Look at me
Your magic
Moved the mountain
And this seeker
Now is free
Look at me
Pretty woman
Can't you see
Look at me
For I no longer
Want to die
I'm man enough
To cry
Look at me
Pretty woman
I am free

Steam Train Troubles
Percival the steward of the train
Ordered foie gras and oysters too
But left them on the station platform like a fool
Wealthy customers will find this rather tedious
Trips from Switzerland to Germany can be quite mundane
There is plenty of coal though to keep the engine going
Steaming over rail and snow
Not too many murders are expected this go round
Business is much slower this time of year
Train travel lost its luster over time and customers as well
It is quieter with poorer clientele around
A handful of rich still occupy first class
Hang out about the open bar up there
Mr. Smith forgot his ticket
His wife is having an affair with Percival
The conductor wants them both arrested
For their blatant misconduct most unpleasant
Guns come out inside a tunnel entrance
Train covered sights and sounds inside the cab in there
When it exited, Percival was dead
Natural causes were to blame
With a bullet in his brain
Hundred dollar bills were scooped up from the floor
By witnesses who saw nothing but the trees outside
Steam engine rolled along the tracks as usual
Taking truth and reason with it through the snow
Created on 1/14/15 for Shadow Hamilton - “Railway Journeys” Poetry Contest

It’s like a secret dance in the dark,
only you know.
Where nothing can be exposed;
the lies, the cheats, nothing.
When you wake up, you can feel.
You can free your soul
from the box that it’s trapped.
Is there room to cry?
When you dance in the dark,
engulfed by blackness
the quiet words lead you in.
Hush,
don’t let anyone hear you.
If they do,
they might know your secrets.

One was a child
so sweet and mild
Voice of a bell
to ward off hell
One was a bell
with a crystal chime
To comfort the cat
and make the earth shine
Two was a cat
With a mysterious past
A dark view of the world
And a horrible wrath
Two was a mind
as dark as night
To protect the doll
That could not see the light
Three was a doll
With a broken soul
A shattered heart
With eyes a black hole
Three was a rose
Of pure white
Covered in thorns
As black as night

"this poem is not about what is written,but what is not written. . . "
Greyer looms matter's of the.....?
Beauty fades not there then.....?
Flowers live and die fact of ....?
A four letter word of endearment....?
A saddened stare like where the Red Fern.....?
Do not withdraw from the sunlight given by the almighty...?
The feeling active of letters four much like adores.....?
Speaking in second person sounds like and is...?
In the prelude I allude to this message to point to the truth
You cannot see air but it is there so beware
You do not have to walk into the total darkness
to see how dark the blackness is
Like gravity that holds you there how much more our Creator cares
Setting on shelf scoffing at the pain you do not see
The love that is and can be He just wants to set you free
ignorance of the law does not excuse
How deep the pain how dark is that blue
without Hope without God waiting to play the odds
Without knowledge must be total misery
as earthly beauty fades as the tree
a dieing thing without fruit
the growing sorrow does that suit
without hope of new life tomorrow
Here today and gone so to borrow
Not opening a door can be as bad as slamming it in your face
to see where true beauty is you run in place not seeing the grace
turn to the light dwelling in the dusk from the womb to dust
on your pedestal under your own glass
the fire that was given you smother to ash - john edaward beam - for The
Unwritten contest - 07/01/2011

You are not the man, you want to be
You said you were my Father, till, I discovered different
Enduring, daily beatings
Bashing the living day lights, out of a woman and a child
Repetitive, bad ass attitude, nasty streak
Mean and aggressive!
Fists, knives and guns, your weapons of chose
Out of control, abusive, devious
Relentless, over – bearing!
Breaking me, piece by piece
Confusing a child, with unhealthy love
Hand fed your bullshit, brain washed
Using me as your human, punching bag
This innocent child’s blood, staining your callas hands
My child’s curiosity, asking you one day
“Why do you hurt me and Mum?”
Your retort: “I am not your blood!”
I didn't understand, back then
Now, as an adult, I clearly understand!
Believe me, when I say
There was never a day that went past
That you didn't remind me of that!
My freedom, restrained
My sanity, tested
Caged, like a wild bird in captivity
Behind bars, looking out
Here, I am today, free from your grip
Nursing, this inner child’s, bleeding love

This house doesn't need ghosts to scare anyone
The walls take sanity for fun
They'll hex you with whispers in tongue
Arrive with confidence, you'll leave with none
The longer you stay, the further undone
The air stifles, it thickens and numbs
It weighs down on you like tons
Constricting every cell, it stuns
Skeletons in these closets tote guns
Heat comes at you like fire from dragons
I mean heat like the fury of a thousand suns
Your mind weakens and maddens
This house kills souls like it's a soul assassin
A suffering only the wicked can fathom

It is dark and night outside my window,
and in the soundless, lit confines of my
room I sit at my old, ivory desk
cheerless
and anxious with dread for what the rest
of another night may bring.
My ostomy bag, an abhorrent creature that
hugs precariously on one side of my abdomen,
covers my raw and fleshy stoma underneath.
Against my desire, the stoma continually oozes
feces and waste
like a sewer into the ostomy bag, which,
every seven days or so ruptures its seal
and transforms into
a stinking and rancid cabbage
whose fetid odor refuses to stop emanating
until the entire, offensive beast is immediately
uprooted from my body.
So, I sit at my ancient, ivory desk, writing
these cherry-picked words to express
the anxiety and the doldrums
of another night;
and the lonely, isolating, embarrassing, humiliating,
ego-wiping, self-esteem killing, mind-numbing,
soul-shattering, universal, all-embracing,
omni-present
stench
that weekly offends my nostrils and fills my lungs
because of a thoroughly used-up ostomy bag that
needs to be removed immediately
like an old, decaying vegetable
that has outlived its
freshness--
It is another cheerless night in the same, old
cheerless space:
the nose-blistering smell, however, is only for
another night...

velvet tears slip down my cheek.
a gentle cry.
and the wet drops seep in the corners of my mouth
until
my lungs are full of my own salty, crystalline tears,
bringing buoyancy to boats that sail inside my veins.
as a rule, I try not to cry.
if a single tear is shed, who is to say that another will not follow?
compelling the rest to join
until I’ve immersed myself in the sea I’ve incepted,
and soon
all I see are the opalescent peaks of water colliding with my skin.

No thought too dark for the monster
the beast will bare its teeth.
The innocent taste of false hopes and dreams
and the Angel of Mercy is torn limb from limb.
No point of contention.
Who am I to decide
if love is just another word for weakness?
Guilt demands punishment and violence leads to violence.
The retribution must fit the crime.
Guilt demands punishment
violence leads to violence
when a creeping burden yearns to devour the heart
through vivid memories that tell of a dark history.
Fearfully repressed,
regretfully denied.
A monster lays dormant below the mind.
Rise to the surface,
there's no place left to hide.
How much more hate within me will I find...?

I feel a heavy weight go down, down, down, down, deep down in my chest,
Like an elevator descending rapidly down a deep dark abyss, and fear crashing in from all sides with all the weight of an ocean breaking loose closing from all sides, the loneliness stings like a nest of desert scorpions, and the desperation consumes me like the venom of a cobra annihilating me a living cell at a time,
They tell me “a will, will find a way”, religions tell me “hold the hand and it will lead thee unto the light ”But there is no pot to whip up will from, and I see no shining being`s hand,
I see no end in sight to this journey through the wasteland.
Could it end in a different way? Logic says Nope,
Yet I harbor a secret hope,
This was not my decision my call, this birth, I did not vote to live,
I am tired of all this negativity and some things got to give.
Books say, the body is temporary, so is the pain salvation is the ultimate goal,
All empty words with no solace and I am yet to see my soul.
What good is a salvation unknown when today passes in pain, what good is the miracle if the thirsty pilgrim dies and then it comes down to rain?
Reach out in the dark and you may feel me somewhere,
Wandering, wondering, dreaming, pondering,
Like a man on an endless plain chased by a pride of lions looking out for a tree,
Let the weight fall down, let the ocean drown, let the scorpion`s sting, and let the poison do its thing.
I don’t care, in the end I just want to be free,
No happiness, no sadness, no pain, nothing and into nothingness..
I wish to where it all began,
On the edge of the death land, beyond. Always beyond.

There’s a weight on my chest that won’t go away
A stinging in my eyes, but it’s not the rain
Scars on my arm that take forever to fade away
Drowning out the world because participation leads to pain
Hearing the whispers when you’re alone
“Nobody cares about you… Just kill yourself already”
The darkness creeps up ever so slowly
The weight just gets more heavy
Wanting to find ways to numb the pain
and make the world go away for a day
Nobody notices when you start to cry
You become invisible, but its not that you’re shy
Why open up when the world wants you to die?
You’re too much of a burden to ask for help
Even if you had a rope to your throat and
try to see if you can fly
Dipping your pillows into the ocean
The only comfort you have is that other people wouldn’t be bothered by your death
You become two different people
The one you were whispers for help, with tears in your eyes
While the one you became shouts “I’m fine” and smiles, refusing to let the other you
reach out for help, before you decide to take your life
The one you became smothers you, refusing to talk to anyone
You fall deeper into yourself
Until you fade away completely

12 hour phone card...
I found one the other day
sitting there minding its own business
waiting for a phone call.
I picked it up,
he looked at me annoyed,
and I smiled at him
and he tried to bite me.
The 12th street bus to Michigan and West Chicago
pulled to the curb and the doors opened grandly
and the driver looked at me...
He spit and closed the doors
the bus hauled off,
leaving me and the 12 hour phone card in a grey cloud
of muffler snot.
I found a payphone(yes they're still around)
and I punched in the number that was on the front.
A couple beeps later a voice picked up
and seduced me,
I looked at the card
and laughed,
the voice laughed and told me to hang up.
I had no idea who that was, or what drove me to doing that,
I placed the 12 hour phone card down on top of the payphone
and walked to the next bus stop.
A bus pulled up and the doors opened grandly as I were a King.
I got on and rode to the closest stop to the Suburbs
and walked the rest of the way home.
I smoked a couple cigarettes on the way home
and my mother caught me,
she yelled at me,
I laughed and said I would quit.
I later remembered that 12 hour phone card
was for gamblers anonymous to help coop with addiction...
and I found two blocks away from the MGM Casino...
I pulled another cigarette out and lit it,
and I walked with my mind racing and there I found myself
rambling on and on about irony and metaphor
and how we all should just take one big shit on life
and flush it down the toilet we call death.

And like that, the mind flashed on
The light was slowly dulling and the darkness was winning
Crushed into sooty shadows
Thoughts spewed from the gloom
Glowing so pessimistically dry
As if by Hades the darkness was fulsome
The quiet rendered all but peace within
Stabbing into the skin
The pinprick of realization
The drive for recognition
But the sudden snap of sicklied inspiration
Transformed the atmospheric epiphany
Overwrought yet powerless
Consuming like heartless acid
Eating but disintegrating
People crunched up the words
People averted their eyes from the beginning
Others stayed till the end
Enduring through the rubbish
Then turned their heads away for good
Glad it was all over
And still
Thoughts reveled in and out of negative pores
Glaring in silent fires
Flaring with false light
Unsure
Understood
Always burning
Yearning

No words can describe what you do to me
You inject in me some sort of venom-like sweetness
Mind and body erase
Making room for feeling and admiration
On my side of thought, you merely despise me
You leave me in melancholy wonder
Melting me like a candle, I become so low
And burn all the more!
Because this wax in me is lathered in your substance
Sometimes I wonder if you are made of venom at all
Sometimes I bring myself to believe. . .
That you are sweet. . .
And you want me to enjoy it
Why I suffer so profusely I cannot tell
Why I allow myself to believe
That I may love you
Only toughens my doubt of a shell
Perhaps I never loved you
Or perhaps I do more and more everyday
And the shell grows all the more fragile
I am low as can be in this room
This dreary, candlelit fantasy involving you
I age in a young body
Trapped in ancient pain
Wrapped in insipid, typical emotion
Bludgeoned with irrefutable doubt
Your very few words burn me
Melting me into nothing. . .
But when I am finally blown out
I have no choice but to harden
Sometimes I return tall
Other times I remain small
I wonder which one you prefer

wether to weather stormy weathers,
crucial to any understandings.
dire to decision,
more like a feeling never mentioned.
heavy to the struggle;
when the weight of the world is on your shoulder,
rise above the storm,
rise above the norm.
critical to the lifestyles,
hard to choose where to begin.
to wait till' the sun shines,
not waiting for the tears to rain.
so many unaware;
the choice you have to make,
the effect it has on you and everybody.
to stress getting through,
to make the right changes.
better to mve on,
don't linger on the problem.
not to get undertow by the trials and tribulations.

The twisted and twirled
Poison Ivy
Of Pride and Arrogance
In the misty woods of its own,
Retaining itself to be shown
Or itself to be stirred.
The gusts of words
Not able to halt
The poison Ivy swelling,
Swelling on the earth of accessors,
Bringing death to all.
Nothing left but
The misty wood of
The twisty and twirled
Poison Ivy
Of Pride and Arrogance.

I got a bad review,a terrible review
"Give it up" it said
Please stop writting, you stupid fool
We don't want to read anymore of your shit
Your wasting your time
Your poetry's crap
Can't even spell, punctuations non existent
So I'll write for my fans I've only got two
But they like my work so f..k you
I'll put pen to paper
Join beautiful words
Write a poem for the masses
I could use big words
I don't understand, look to the dictionary for every line
Leave a blankness in your head
Wondering what the hell it said
From this poem your feel astounded
Magnificent,marvellous, absolutly gorgeous
All the beautiful words I've put down
Look lovely, sound wonderful
But don't mean a thing
I'll tell you what is little-known
What school is like if you actually go
I never went to college you see
No chance of a university degree
Pretty much what you see
Is what you tend to get with me
I don't know how to write poetry
All I know is what's inside of me
The rawness, blatant truth
Sometimes happy, mostly not
My writing will shock
Make you see some truth
As raw as possible, this is what I do
I'll never sugar coat things
Make them easier to swallow
The big wide worlds out there and its ****ING horrible
African children dying in pain
Their mother's tits sliced off,raped and maimed
Our boys fighting an endless war
So those countries can have much more
Children blowing themselves up
As their told its the way to God
This governments *****people are freezing
As our war veterans can't afford the heating
What kind of world is this that we live
When people are starving,dying and sick
Don't ask me to change my poetry again
Or I'll shout it from the roof of your office building

Pain, anger, torture, she came from a broken family
And it eventually broke her sanity
She reacts to everything so angrily
But wants to be better and people call it vanity
She saw her mother getting beat down by her father
Her dad took advantage and abused her
No wonder she’s so lost and it all scarred her
No wonder any love or affection goes straight through her
She drowns her sorrow with a bottle of vodka
Thinks her body and sex is all she can offer
But now she’s pregnant with a baby
After being raped by a friend, and a doctor
She lost her will to live
A long time a go
Considering an abortion, but doesn’t want to kill her kid
People say she deserves it as she allows her thong line to show
But I don’t know how anyone can have the nerve to say that
They haven’t known her from way back
They just think she’s the new girl on the block
And everyone stays back
No one welcomes her or tries to get close
They just see she’s a young girl who’s pregnant
And call her a slut and hoe
Her pain and misery just won’t lessen
She doesn’t know where the hope is at
Friends just offer her cocaine and crack
Basically silently killing her
When they should be healing her
They should be doing all they can to help her
But they use her and put themselves first
The next time they go round they find her dead in the bath tub
This is just a story i made up based on real life
you never know what a person's been through or what they feel like
so make sure you get to know someone before you judge
I’m sorry i had to go so deep
But daily we see these things happen
Before you throw your judgment
Just know you could be responsible for another person’s actions

Caskets unmade
Naked bodies lie in waste
Can you hear the concealed laments?
Afraid to express
Afraid to breathe
Unable to stop the grief
Teeth grind
A young boy picks up a dried hip bone
Scooping up the soil to bury Sleeping Kate
Spines tingle at the crunch of excessive skeletons
Grimy boots unmercifully stomp
Sleeping Kate showed the officers
The skeleton she built out of bone fragments
Sleeping Kate told them we were all the same inside
With this truth, she died
With their guilt, they continued life
They tried. . .
The officers tried to bury Sleeping Kate
But Sleeping Kate is always alive,
Building skeletons in their minds. . .
4-7-13

Today is Doomsday.
Some believe today is Doomsday
Some say maybe the end of the year
However, do we really care?
How would the earth end?
In a ball of fire or
would it swallow us up into puff of dust
in a matter of an hour..
I rather am buried under pile of snow.
Eternal Preservation "what a nice way to go
However do we have option in a world?
Where lunatics have taken over asylums
where deranged souls spreading like a social cancer
Is doomsday the answer..?

Lightning strikes
Across the barren sky
Leaving a red image
Burned into my eyes
Hearing chains moving
I don’t see anything before me
But emptiness and darkness
All of a sudden
A band of evil comes out
And seeks to convert me
The werewolves and vampires
All want my blood
To sustain their own lives
But to end mine
So I run very fast
Not knowing where I’m going
I simply run into a house
And they stay away
Afraid to enter
I look around the barely lit room
I find everything to be antique
There is an ancient picture
Of a frightening person
On the mantel of the fireplace
I smell chemicals burning
As if something is happening
I hear chanting of a woman
And an evil laugh as well
I hear footsteps coming from a door
So I hide behind a grandfather clock
And I peek to see this hideous woman
Fearful she looks so evil
Now she walks into the living room
And stops in mid step
She looks right at me
And her finger snaps
And uncontrollably I move towards her
Without any will of my own
She brings me to her
With her own bidding
To create fear, great fear inside me
I find it tremendously fierce
And pain starts to writhe in me
She laughs, a cackling laugh
And kisses me on my cheek
She then tells me, “Thou art going to die tonight”
And I know deep inside
She is telling the truth
The next thing I know
I’m tied up inside a large pot
And she starts to boil the liquid
That is beneath me
I can only feel the intense pain
And really find myself
Being boiled alive
Boiled in her basement
Just for a solution of evil
Something she is making for herself
So she may wield invincible powers
And live for another hundred years
As an evil witch
Russell Sivey
Contest: Halloween only
Sponsor: SKAT - XOX
10/13/2013

Muddy photographs at old house
black birds hanging out bare and brave,
sleeves of torn corpses and hanging bones
by the brown door,
but old man where are you?
Are you one of those?
No!
Some one phoned me to come here
and that some one had a warm,alive voice.
Was that a man under claws,forced?
I cut the handles,
they fall into my hands
and termites were biting
the dust. Look,
what kind of
statue is that? On the stairway
half blocking
and half awe commanding,
that statue of a lady with fresh flowers.
How ironic
to see such statues here
and smelling of
lavender and green tea leaves,
like lotus in a pool of mud.
But old man. Where are you?
Are you side by side
with the sun,as evaporated air?
I don't know. If i knew i would not come.

This ancient warrior frowns.
His distinguished life caught fast
In the threads of a
Cunning spider’s web.
Entrapment spun by
A dark invader.
His only hope of
Survival is a
Cold assassins’ tool.
Chemical warfare,
The wave of carnage.
This ancient warrior cries
To see the mindless slaughter
Of innocents to
Conquer the dark
Cancerous malice.
Sacrificial lambs.
Fatigue with kindness
Soothes his troubled soul
And spurs his will to
fight. He drifts in waves
Through poisonous seas.
This ancient warrior smiles.
Death retreats in shadowed haste.
Ambition thwarted
By assassins’ wave.
The dark invader
Choking, fades to dust.

I'm here bordering almost oneiric
in a state of somnolence in an invisible fire
wearing the personification of a hellish realm
obsessive and compulsive in the unknown...
I turn the hourglass counting grains of sand
to validate my existence pondering am I a victim
alone and depressed tonight...
Are you as lonely as I am, perhaps?
do you wear the narcissistic smile
in the shape of the crescent moon?
Que tal, La Luna
I whisper to the night in disintegration
"Your sleepy lullaby has failed me tonight"
just as the opiates that fall from your eyes
in steams of gleaming silver dreams...
Euphoria fades with shallow thoughts
in glass silhouettes of burning embers
making a pile of ashes so unique
no insane arsonist could have imagined...
Comes the dawn to end this paralysis
leaving me wondering am I just a marionette
that even opiates or Xanax cannot cure...
On the corner of my night table
empty bottles mock me...

It’s been broken for so long;
Silently churning.
I forgot I was alive,
swimming through rotten joy.
Fatigued and Complacent.
You found me;
a torrid husk enraptured
by a sinning sun.
I spun under that liar’s star,
wishing on it’s peers for a new world.
A new way to breathe.
Hunting throughout eons
lost in-between the reckoning
of seconds; caught up in a disheveled
theater.
I thought they had forgotten me.
I had nearly lost sight of my favorite
constellations,
Looking up.
Stiff necked.
Hoping to find the light
that could remind me of
the thoughts that used to
come to me when I first
discovered the sky’s
patience for my reach.
-James Kelley 2013, All rights reserved.

Chirup, Chirupup is now gone away
For the Cricket now sleeps in the deep woods
Deep down under a bed of dry decaying leaves
Awaiting the spring's warmth to call__ come
Out across the now no-fence pasture
Lies a giant pan of Rice Krispies cookies
White on tan the dead crispt grass made so by the cold hoary frost
Chilled so that it groans from the cold penetrating deep within the ground
The whole earth awaits that warm sun who takes his time
Slowly slipping back closer up, up, up to the Northern Hemisphere
Will spring come to renew or will those deep woods remain dark and deep
Inviting all eyes to see inside the open venerable vault of clearing
Those dark deep woods encourage exploring
To clear away all the tangled briars, dead barren ideas that need purging
Open clear up those winter woods for new growth of spring
New ideas on which to encourage the grow of the poetic mind
Been in winter long enough in that cold barren woods
Trapped in the cold lingering by the fire of hearth's contentment
Now is the time to escape_be fresh new
Spring _bring on the novel

why is it that
when a crime is committed
we turn a blind eye but
when we our nation is praised
we grin in satisfaction
illusions of pride
and self admiration blind us
we perceive what we
want to perceive
remaining permanently ignorant
of our harsh reality
Charlatanism reigns supreme
in this land if fore destined destruction
and as our nation plunges
into a dark abyss
a light smothered
in jealousy and hatred gleams
A ray of unity, and hope
the light of our nation's lost pride

The Haaotia first came when you were young
Crawling into your presence cleverly
disguised in the skins of your own blood,
they began to tell you their lies
They told these lies in soft voices,
the voices with the same timbre and
tone you'd come to trust, they'd chuckle
in the same cheerful way that you'd heard
so many times in the light, when you were young
Even in the dark, you could see the smiles
on their terrible faces, as they told you not
to be afraid, the same smiles that
before, had lifted your heart and
made you laugh, when you were afraid
Telling their lies to you behind those
familiar smiles; with their soft voices
and chuckles, they were such friendly,
cheerful demons, so familiar, so familiar
even their smell and their touch was familiar
How could you be afraid of the Haaotia?
But, you were afraid and so you kept quiet,
with all the smiles and chuckles and smells
and touches in the dark, you were so quiet,
because you were very afraid of them
finding the others, the younger ones
You found a way to leave your body to keep quiet;
in your mind you went elsewhere, somewhere
far, far away from there, far from the familiar smiles
and soft voices and chuckles
Far away from the smells and the touches in the dark,
as far as you could go, to places with no name
in your language, places the Haaotia couldn't know
When you'd come back, they were always gone,
their smiles and chuckles and smells were gone,
but the feel of their touches never left you
The feel has never left, it may never leave
Because the Haaotia,
with their familiar smiles
and soft voices and chuckles
Touched your soul
Author's notes:
Haaotia is a Beothuk (Native North American language) word for demon.
This was written for someone that I loved very deeply who suffered terribly at the hands of their own loved ones.
I dedicate it to them and anyone else who has felt the terrible touch of their own Haaotia

I am a sinner you know
I was a devil in my past
I am confessing my guilty before you
to get a small relax from the present fears
They are chasing even in my dreams
to rescue my mind, I am confessing here
Black and dark days coming ahead to me
Light is not there and only dark dominates in my roads
My Calf! My dear most
Take me to the world of peace and
Get me His rescuing grace
Though I am a sinner and corrupted soul
Love is there to Him and fear is there on His words
Call Him to save me from this dark
Ask Him to relieve from this Hell
I doubt, will He come to call and
Will he hear my cries with grace?
As a sinner and cruel
I ‘ve lost a chance to call Him to confess
As a beloved noble soul
He will come to your call and
He will hear your words as a Lord
Call Him My calf to accept my confession

His name was Charles Bukowski,
but he liked to go by the name of Hank.
He was a dirty old man,
who wrote poems
and did poetry readings
that paid him next to nothing.
With a wine bottle in his hand
a pack of cigarettes in the other,
with a half burnt cigarette lit in his mouth
and he was dressed like a Hollywood Bum.
But he wasn't sad, or mad
he had a smile on his face.
As the whores walked down with their big asses
and tits that were big and round quarter shaped nipples stuck out.
The Dirty old man, said with a laugh, "It must be cold outside."
And he continued down the lonesome Los Angeles streets,
going to his next poetry reading.

TWILIGHT IS OUR DAWN Collaboration
CINDY LU:
As evening shades... the day's moment fades.
And I sit with the setting sun... upon his delicate.
Yet only in brevity, this shimmering upon my soul.
Woe to darkness, scampering about ...
star's flicker, woo & glamour Yea,
this dark of night amidst your eloquence.
This stage before me, with thine eyes mist;
the new day's dawn of arrival.
Yet in this moment, I'm captive.
Evening beckons... and truth delights.
The heart's tithing... joys divine.
Awakened within this dream... his delicate fading.
Shades of gray... the city sirens, the scent of death...
mourns her neon.
And as I read...the poet cries the jester laughs...
the widow dies.
FRANK:
We awake at twilight...our kind.
Some how... the world seems easier to take...
in translucent hues of crimson...
your alabaster skin...in this light..
looks devoid of sin.
Yes... 'Delicate'...we too...
tears are easier to hide at night.
Yet we'll blunder through...
for any taste...of night's delights...
to get us through
COLLAB...Cindy Lu Cayton...Frank Herrera.

Don't forget to cross the Ts
and dot your Is
because if you don't do that
they're just lines vertical on a page.
Lets us forget about the imperfect words
that make us cry
the vertical lines,
like jail bars hold us back.
Stand up and out and roar like a lion!
she is mine, I love her,
but I am quiet,
held back by the vertical lines
the black oily jail bars,
that keep my hear caged in
everytime I cry and people don't listen
the guard taps his nightstick upon
the vertical bars,
the imperfect feelings of pain and sadness
feeling like this it bores me
feeling like this makes me sick
and I feel myself wanting to vomit
and shake the nervous feeling
of falling into a dark hole,
so I sit behind these vertical lines,
like cocaine lines, ready to snort up your nose,
like cigarettes lined in a perfect and neat row,
like empty wine and beer bottles
littering around my feet.
The vertical lines take me away from reality,
close my already blinded eyes
with a black blindfold.
These jail bars cross my soul,
chain my the ankles and wrists,
and choking me, holding my head under water,
I can't breath!!! Help me!
These vertical bars hold me back in life,
hold my emotions from coming out,
to tell you how I feel for you!
I no more want vertical lines,
I want to be free.
Drive horizontal roads that wined and turn around beautiful mountains
too take a deep breathe and share the beauty
to watch the horizontal horizon.
Too sit on a beach shore and write till the sun goes down
and the mermaids sings cheerful tunes
that uplift my spirits and break the remaining vertical lines
that bind and hold my heart in place.
There is nothing beautiful in a straight line,
let alone a vertical one.
Horizontal, vertical all bad in their own ways,
always trapping us, like jail bars or barbwire that streches across the open lands.
Love has no lines,
no boundaries,
so why should I have lines that bind me together
holding my head underwater,
till a spark lights a powder keg and blows me sky high
and I finally set myself free
and roam the horizon for ever.

The feeling of disastrous thoughts,
Of my loved one now lost.
The pain escapes in fine threads,
Showing no end.
People come and go,
And change comes slow.
They live to forget,
To have no regrets.
Memories flourish in waves of ecstasy,
Only time can heal our tragedies.
Fear of the future alternates with loops of excitement,
And our hearts will break and mend,
The pain will eventually end.

THE ISLANDS OF SAN JUAN - TIMESHARE
[FOLKTALE]
IN A PORTION, A SPELL IS CASTE.
THE PEOPLE ARE CALLED NUGLUMMI.
IN A TRANCE STATE, THEY EAT HONEY AND BEES ARE FORM FROM THEIR EYES.
INSIGHTFULLY THEY BEGIN TO TRANSFORM THE TERRAIN AND ISLANDS FORMED FOR THE FREEDOM OF WOMAN AND MAN.
THE PEOPLE OF THE SEA ARE FREE IN THE PUGET SOUNDS.
DOUGLAS FIR GROWS TALL.
THE LANDSCAPE IS EVERGREEN AND THE LUMMIS ARE SALISAN.
DIALECTIC VERSIONS OF THIS LANGUAGE ARE POSSESSED.
THEIR LOGIC IS HOW THEY TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES.
*
THE PENINSULA THAT RESIDES IN THEIR TOPOGRAPHY IS VAST IN SHAPE AND FASHIONED BY THE UNINHABITED PORTAGE ISLAND WHERE THEIR RESERVED LAND NOW LAYS. LIKE MANY NORTHWEST COAST TRIBES, THEY GASTRONOMY CONSISTS OF THE COLLECTING OF SHELLFISH, GATHERING OF PLANTS SUCH AS CAMAS AND DIFFERENT SPECIES OF BERRIES, AND MOST IMPORTANT, AS SALMON FISHERMEN, THEY DEVELOPED “REEF NETTING.”
THEY ENJOY POTLATCH ON THE ORCAS ISLAND, SAN JUAN ISLAND, LUMMI ISLAND, FIDALGO ISLAND, PORTAGE ISLAND, AND NEAR POINT ROBERTS AND SANDY POINT.
IN ALL NUGLUMMI, WERE COMMERCIAL TO THEIR TRADE.
THEY GREATER HARVEST IS TODAY.
THE PADDLE TO LUMMI IS 68 CANOEING FAMILIES PADDLING HAND-MADE CANOES TO THE LUMMI RESERVATION FROM PARTS OF WASHINGTON STATE AND BRITISH COLUMBIA.
**
[TODAY]
THESE ISLANDS OF THE PUGET SOUNDS IS TOO FAR AWAY TO HEAR.
WITH A GRAIN OF SALT, THE SEA SWEEPS THE BEACH.
REMEMBRANCE IS IN WALKING SILENTLY AND HEARING THE TRIBAL SINGING IN SALISH.
THESE ISLANDS ARE A CASTAWAYS HAVEN – A HARBOR OF CONTENTMENT, WHICH LAY IN BRITISH COLUMBIA AND THE NORTHWESTERN UNITED STATES.
ROMANTIC ENDEAVORS ARE BASED ON YOUR IMAGINATION.
THESE ARE THE SAN JUAN ISLANDS OF WASHINGTON STATE.
MAY YOUR VISIT BE SAFE!
***
ABOUT THIS POEM:
FOR 12,000 YEARS, THE LUMMI SUBSISTED NEAR THE PACIFIC OCEAN AND IN NEARBY MOUNTAIN REGIONS. THEY RETURNED SEASONALLY TO THEIR LONGHOUSES SITUATED AT SCATTERED LOCATIONS ON TERRITORY THAT IS INCLUDED IN THE PRESENT RESERVATION IN TODAY'S WESTERN WHATCOM COUNTY AND THE SAN JUAN ISLANDS OF WASHINGTON STATE.
*ENTRY INTO CONTEST "ISLANDS"
*ENTRY DATE: FEBRUARY 26, 2014

My sad, deplorable glory is a nightmare for another
This knowing is sickening to the bone
The need for anothers' pain is like a virus
Slitting the veins of truth and delirious want of false
Watching the bile flow through
I emptied a full, sorrowful glass for you
Without even a moment’s glance
Your parched lips opened to drink
But like poison the sustainable exhalation surrounded your body
I shrank at the shrieks of your disquietude
Not knowing what to do
Expression died with the loss of flow
I couldn’t flourish in the bleak winters of your loss
I couldn’t grow
All happiness in a flash of susceptibility
Turned to woe
I gave into thinking it was all an unworthy dream
But the answers, the symbolism was never clear
The loss of your very soul is what I fear
I never meant to poison you in what I take as nourishment
And here now you rot
At the expense of these sad, empty tunes
They must mean close to nothing to you
Pain
Pain
Why do I revolve around the pain?
The empty glass of your spirits remains stained
With the insides of all things true
Torn away
Smothered in a ghostly, ghastly gore
I couldn’t see you could not take it
The sorrow I meant to erase to fake it
But instead make it
The reason I live is to sing for you
To disintegrate the swelling blue
But instead I crawled into your only space
Leaving only disgrace
The gore splattering in jewels across your face
I’ll tell you what
All my achievements are naught
They are only fakes
I am nothing without God’s grace
I spurt with illegitimate words and tunes
That you can never face!
As if by the heaven I inspired
I am drunken with your bile
Of pride risen above the mile
What is this sadness—
This anger, this madness?
Show me what to do
Show me what to say
I’ll dispose of all vagaries I dared to feel today
And replace it with pain
Replace it with pain
Discordance from another is my nightmare smothered
And this the majority crave
The need—the desire for acknowledgement
We will take it to the grave
I never wanted heartless fame
A poison in a cup
I never wanted anything
Only to fill you up
I poured the glass and there it came
Just sad, tired air
Nothing left to give you
Not even the sentiment of a stare
The truth is I am scared
The truth is I am scared
I guess, at times we are all. . .
Not there
7/13/13

Dear wife
I killed a man today…
Hence to you, I must confess
This heavy burden of mine
Orders came swiftly
And thrust upon the battlefield was I
Shouts of “Charge! Charge!”
Echoing still, throughout my mind
Blinded by the masses
Of my fellow men
Who seemed to bound past
Too far ahead
Somewhere in the distance
An enemy was not seen
I remained cowardly frozen, while oblivious
To dangers surrounding me
Why in this particular moment
To be struck in the head
Not by a missile
But, by too many questions I could not comprehend
And deafening explosions, whistling bullets
A reddening madness in the midst
I stood all alone…
Contemplating with anger and clenching my fists
Then, I spied a suspicious movement
From out the corner of my eye
He came rushing towards me, bayonet in hand
Now, I reasoned fairly quickly that I did not want to die
It was he or it was I
Who was more willing to live
Were there now moral questions to decide
Or just an instinct of actions we did
Sadly my love
All I can say…
Is that, I’m the one who lived
And walked away
Again, in regret I inform you
That I’m not entirely sure if I sinned
But, this I do know, I did not win
I killed a man today

He liked sleeping in the barnyard
with the carnivorous pigs, clucking
halfway through the night. Emptied
picnic basket dribbling cobalt off the
sides, if that was what a wooden chin
looked like then he'd seen it all..
Green ended nappies, white hair dye
and rubber teeth. At the very least, a
cavorting priest... although that was
nothing out of the ordinary.
Shivering at his own memories,
the blanket now outgrown.

Cold shadows form
Blacker bars from locked window
Fall upon the remaining light and I
Wake caged memories as animals
Metaphors arouse the senses
Silence louder grips regret
And all I can do
Is think to run
But, instead I again hold on tighter
To my waning sanity
No signs insist on warning
Moments like rocks are falling
Always continue to pile up images within
That now stirs the soup thick dark
And begin to play out
An unspeakable act
Every year upon this very day
I watch from balconies, stuck
In tragedies portrayed
And now I see…
What I forgot
Mother, lying
Covered about her sins
Beneath, I’m a child crying
Guilt turning always finds its way
Around the coo-coo clock
Of hands and helpless
To time’s army, life’s ending, ticking, plot
If, but for an instance
I could be free
Free from what
A reality without her
And her needed love
When is enough, enough!
Please, subconscious just let me go…
And I promise
I’ll keep on… going and forgetting

The color of love
is sometimes indigo
a saturated midnight
of violet and jasmine.
My darkest lover
is a forest
a night of dark trees
she prefers black roses.
Darkness is our candle
we make love
with our shadows
in beautiful darkness.
She gave to me
a box full of darkness
and kisses me
with tiny sips of grey.
We prefer the night
drowning ourselves
in the depth of its hues
darkness soothes.
What strange places
our love carries us
to such dark passages
no cry of light.
Safe and sound
into darkest corners
in the circular
temple of her heart.
She is the raven
in the dark we began
in the dark we stay
in the dark we bleed...
~ ~

Day quickly fades into a fearful silent night
Frightful because within the darkness evil comes to life
Abomination that became legend as legend became myth
The Aswang
The wicked epitome of sin
Beautiful by day but a shapeshifting demon in disguise
It has a long disgusting tongue with unspeakable desires
Blood thirsty creatures eating unborn babies in the womb
Fangs that'll transform people into dead flesh eating ghouls
Severing her body from her legs so it can fly
On serpent angel wings preying on its next victim to die
Bayani took his pregnant wife Amor to the hospital for becoming sick
A three day journey from their mountain village will now begin
Theyll travel through the valleys seeking shelter as they go
Amor wearing garlic on her belly protecting her babies soul
Traveling through jungle & deserted roads along the shore
Knowing when they hear a dreadful cry theyre not alone
With every step they take they abhor the falling moon
Something once so beautiful is now impending doom
By dusk they came upon a village but every door was closed
Desperation in their voice they scream for help with little hope
Dismay dripping from their skin so the demon could smell their fear
Before they heard the dreadful cry the Aswang did appear
In horror they banged on every door pleading for some help
But no one gave relief having their own to protect from hell
Bayani remembered legend perhaps there is a way we can survive
Destroy her legs before she reattached her upper body in morning rise
A task that may be difficult because the lower half they have to find
Before they made a move she swooped down with her evil yellow eyes
She grabbed Amor by her throat as Bayani pled for her life
Please let my wife and baby go and in return you can have mine
She said a lovely gesture but be patient youre the next to die
With a evil grin she slit her throat and consumed their unborn baby still inside
Falling to his knees with a broken heart he asked her why
She said I have no compassion or reason and let me tell you why
"Im the first Aswang of this village
A maiden by the day
Im the reflection of their darkness and their evil ways
Desires that cannot be spoken
A blackened heart equally broken
Habits that are disgusting
I am made of nothing
I am the mirror they will never face
The fear that keeps them all awake
But the truth is much more powerful
I am the face behind their faith
The contradiction of forgiveness
For every time you kneel and pray
Im the fear that keeps the children crying and afraid
It started with a lie
Then desires to reach the sky
Which resulted into sadness
but with a deeper understanding why
Sad because I can see the darkness they themselves alone hav caused
Many more will be like me and many already lost
Failed secrets buried forever
And I will be like them
I am also you
If you wear the wickedness of all your sins"

Dementia has taken hold of my mind.
There is nothing, my reasoning controls.
Sorry for my demeanor.
I don't mean to hurt anyone.
Its paralysis of my thinking mind.
Please forgive my deeds.
They are insane and unkind.
I did not know that my subconscious mind,
Can take control.
I hardly remember any event in my life.
There are some, that I recognise.
Just the deeply etched impressions.
Most of the time, I am not me.
I became somebody, I do not know.
I cannot even wish, that my will to live, will end.
My reasoning is demented.
I wish that they are not so unkind.
My loved ones suffer the ignominy.
If I had my senses intact.
I would have rewritten history.
It’s a shame that in this 21st century.
There are no solutions for this bane.
Euthanasia is not prescribed by law,
Nor can I self destruct.
There is no justice from above or below.
Just feel I am suspended in time.
I cannot imagine what I can’t.
I cannot express what I want.
No guilt no shame,
what wrong have I done,
To exist in this parallel universe.

Even then though—you ask how!
How can she not return the hatred!
But we humans cannot think so beyond
To even dare comprehend the mystery sentiments she possesses
Surrounding her are twelve unattainable senses
That we only know from a single mind’s imagination
Like space she is enigma
And she will wander there without any question
Her senses are twelve sojourners that never tire
Watching with melodious eyes
Some see darkness and some see light
And none are ever affected by the garish dark
Or even the furious bright
Only Time can tell
What the multiple futures hold
But she is patient and silent
Speaking for all of our burning minds
Anger often burns our sides
For we do not want her silent comfort
Her hints seer us and overbear us
Were it be truth we would see it as deceit
Were it deceit we would at last find her a flaw
We want everything now
And for that we suffer
And she is confused by our abhorrence
But she is intelligent, brave and belligerent
And she cuts no slack
She will give none back
But in forwardness she is abundantly generous
Feeding us futures of hope
Her thanksgiving is art to those at death’s door
Those that make it in the uncertainty of night’s long abode
Some think her cruel to have them live on
But she had no choice in the matter
She is merely a vigilante
And in that vision—a humble giver
Time sees the rulers of this world
And smiles as she sees them go
May you not think her cruel to smile
To think that she thinks us inferior
For it isn’t so!
Time is on our side
But we are ever against her
Ever against her
8/5/13
(note: This was meant to be one full poem, but I could not fit it on one page. Thank you kindly for reading)

What makes this world go around?
What makes Death walk the Earth
and God sit on his throne and watch over us?
What makes love go around with such favour
and strut along side lonesome avenues?
What does a widow, a motherless child, a Vietnam veteran
and a boy who has had his fare share of heartbreaks,
all have in common with each other?
They were all promised a beautiful life,
free for all to love, free from the pain of betrayal
and anger.
We are what make the world go around,
I am the poet who sits and looks at love walk down the street,
and watch the blind eyes stare deep in my soul.
I am the poet, that feels the pain of a heart torn in two.
He his the poet who writes of smiles, to forget the frowns
and tears.
She is the poetress that writes of her success,
in order to forget her past that tortured her soul,
now he and she walk together writing poetry
sharing their love and smiles with the world.
But with smiles, also comes frowns,
with hearts full of love, comes hearts full of sorrow,
and someone has to stay behind and write of the bad
has to write and compose the songs of the sorrowed hearts.
We are all given love,
but it takes some whole lives to understand
the dark mystery that tags along with beautiful love.
Someone has to suffer the pain,
someone has to sacrifice his or her happiness,
so another poet can feel the beauty in happiness and pain.
I am willing to sacrifice my time and heart,
for my fellow poet to feel the smiles grow on their faces
and feel love uplift their heart,
while the black cancer tears apart mine.
I will go on, with what is left of my heart and smile,
and go into my room of creativity
and compose the songs of sorrowed hearts
for future poets, like that came before me.

I can’t survive without the rush of an impulsive swallow or an impersonal touch.
I’m fueled by the adrenaline I get solely through sex and drugs, driving while high and chasing danger.
Piercing my skin with needles and pins,
willing to feel the worst to feel anything

It burns and it stings.
It hurts.
More than drowning beneath
the ice.
More than remaining in a
kindled flame
She hits and I no longer cry.
Why mother, why?
It burned and it stung.
The markings remained,
returned, and were relived
Looking, loving, and little
known loathing were the known
ways of living.
Never was their pity for the
child that cried
Never was their relief for the
child that tried
You were that lovely bird that
understood the complications of
felicity
Nothing looked the same in
those dewy browns of yours.
My everbeating would cry tears
of joy.
The others-they were yet to
appear.
Caring Mother, o' so fair
You were that beautiful bird
filled with care.
The others came and were not
alone. Their two suitors sat on
the throne.
Rampage and rage why did you
come?
I began to wither and wither
slumping along. So very soon I-
the child of fines- became a
human raceme.
The droops of the Lily of the
Valley became the slumping of
my heart.
My lovely bird the enemy had
taken you and the person you
were is far from near.
For that divine nature left its
intricate self and you became
irretrievable my big bird.
All of your fairness died.
With that went my pride.
Mother, Mother what moved
you so?
Your intense spirt vanished only
to supplement a monster.
Mother, Monster and your tar
filled lungs.
How did I kill that liver that was
so, so strong?
The lesson of pain was one you
came to learn.
My darling bird why did you
turn?
My lovely bird and your big
brown eyes
I'll tell you once, but never
twice.
Pain is only a flower for it
blooms and dies
And a mistake can be killed as
quickly as lice.
You dear bird hurt me well.
Though, haven't you heard?
Weakness is a souls greatest
strength.
You brought me up, then you
brought me down.
You haved helped, hurt, and
hindered my blazing spirit.
A hero in my heart-I left you
down in your deep black
slumber.
Escaping those terrible nights
To go for the town of delights.

Smoke drifts across the field,
explosions, distant and blurred.
Machine guns discharging rounds,
Scorpions launching slugs.
Flashes of fire,
plasma blue, violet and emerald.
Constant noise, deafeningly loud.
Longswords rocket above,
Banshees screeching past,
Seraphs wheeling about.
Carriers,
their strange curves and mauve plasma,
float ominously above, charging.
Beams strike down, waves of heat,
splitting of the ground beneath my feet.
Before me, as I run,
my comrades are impaled,
by phantoms.
Cyan double swords,
carving the air.
Glowing jade trails knock back my lines,
followed by lilac needles,
exploding on contact.
A whisper of the air,
as if it were shivering itself.
A mirage.
Moving fast, growling at the sight of me.
Searing pain,
the worst I’ve ever felt,
skewers my stomach.
I look down,
into the eyes of a monster.
Onyx eyes, large and livid,
Four jaws, razor teeth.
Gilded armour, highlights of burgundy.
Suddenly it screams, and I feel more pain.
Looking past this monster in gold.
I see another.
Black and platinum,
Faceless and unrestrained.
Blood red blades of light,
lancing the beast’s golden chest.
Indigo flows from the charred wounds
as the other draws its weapons out.
The monster slumps to its knees,
Gurgling and choking.
I fall to the ground as well,
sliding off the cyan sword.
Night is creeping on my vision,
whispering of relief from the hurt.
There, standing above me,
the black and platinum being.
Robotic in appearance,
human in movement.
Staring down at me.
The last I hear,
from this monstrous savior,
is a strange tune.
Issuing from its helmet.
“Olly, Olly Oxen Free”
“I am Spartan 0D- One Three”

When the dawn embraces the universe
Darkness intensifies to cloak the sky
The gaze of mortal sees nothing but night
Then you rise from above exuding your light
You are the moon that reigns above
Enduring the sleepless time of wicked sky
The prowess of the knight flawlessly conjure elegance
A strength that marks within my weakened heart
I came to see what hell is all about
Just to find out that heaven’s is within my grasp
That when I tried to touch its mysterious existence
It disappears right before my naked eyes
Nightfall conquers the universe
Then you came at the darkest hour
Shadows are only seen when there’s light
And you don’t need it with your contrasting might
Blinded oath and selfless dreams
Becomes the reason why there are transient wills
No one is accepted for well-minded ruler
Frosted hope vanishes from nowhere
If wisdom is your sanctuary of hope
Where principles are vows that cannot be broken
Choice is a myth older than a Merlin
I am a casualty of this unorthodox ideals
Let me be the garish star
The fixed luminous shining dot of the night
Let me descend and be at my daunting hours
Until I find my perfect place in the sky
I might be seen by others as the brightest
Playing with the gleaming cadence light
Again let me subside for several times
Or perhaps forever until fate becomes mine
A prisoner of this dream might lost
Cease to live with passion to change the order
But if it’s the only way towards the moonlight
I shall walk with this illusion until I die
Because my hopes shall live forever
That there will come a time
That the keeper of the sky might fall
To the illusion I weaved, it shall exists
To free the soldier of the night
To have the liberty in chasing all the odds-
And give the privilege
To catch this Falling Star…#
-dicychael21 3/26/13-

You wake up and ponder
maybe wonder whats the point
all you can see is the darkness
all you can feel is the world's despair
it envelopes you until you can't breath
you struggle to sit up and push it away
but all that surrounds you is darkness
How can you free yourself from its chains?
what will bring you a ray of light
we all have a guiding spirit to lead us
to take us back to the light
look around when you are in despair
think of others worse off than yourself
See the truth that stares us all in the face
just open your eyes and your heart too
and back into the shadows, the darkness will fade

Through the window view, a thirsty lawn with unclad shades of gray
Arthritic winds have claimed the dawn, this wretched dismal day
The trees bend low, the sun will rise, with solemn loathing dread
With rote routine, he breaks the loaf, one slice of frozen bread
He looks around the cheerless room, a familiar scent of wrong
An angled light has slithered in, with shadows deep and long
and spotlights what's become of him, a man who isn't there...
with clothes unkempt, a shuffled step, and stubble on his chin
Four vinyl chairs, Formica clad, a game of solitaire
Before him sits a plate of food, at a table set for one
A cup of cold, a cigarette, and he who sits alone
The room depicts, what might have been, but reeks with wrought despair
A parakeet within a cage has mocked him once again
The voice is shrill, it squawks with rage, 'Unlock me if you dare!'
The floor is strewn with littered seed, where mice will share the spill
All time has stopped, in ash and dust, the hours couldn't care.......
He takes a puff, then bites the crust, charred taste of toasted bread
For company, she stares at him across the morning's edge,
Her body propped against the wall, beneath the wooden ledge
Her fixed eyes stare, as if surprised...all life has long been dead
Inaudible, just barely heard, he hums a song they knew
He tells her that the coffee's done, and offers her a chair
He shuffles cards, a few for her, and pours a cup of brew
With rote routine, he cuts the deck ........for double solitaire
______________________________________________________
Written for Roy Jerden's Contest: "Poems To Keep You Awake At Night"

In every fraud
There is a bit of the hero.
So I remain lofty in my crystal tower,
And the refugees take shelter
In wormwood times,
Thinking of the worn and weathered wishes
Of dreams turned back.
Placing your bet,
You revolve and cast yourself naked,
Witnessing the revival of your hopes.
And you prepare to cut yourself
From the deck into solitude,
Thinking of the worn and weathered wishes
Of dreams turned back.
I can find no blemish
In your reality,
Yet your questions perish daily
Like untended orchards,
Thinking of the worn and weathered wishes
Of dreams turned back.
July 1971
Denver

The sun was out this morning
But soon the R.A.I.N came and erased any ray of hope I had left
It committed theft
Of my virginity
Flooded and damaged my fertility
R.A.I.N. drops were falling on my head
My secret garden became a water bed
And growing within it
Was the clitoral swelling
That became a dwelling
For constant pain
And while Gene Kelly is singing in it
I’m crying from all the R.A.I.N.
I can’t stand these April showers
How can it bring May flowers?
But deflower me?
What have I done to deserve
Falling victim to the second nature
Of a worthless soul
I guess not realizing the devil could be so bold
When it was all said and done
All I could see was the RED blood between my thighs
That I unwillingly sacrificed
For the R.A.I.N. to stop
The ORANGE that represented my strength was slowly fading
The YELLOW became a brick road that I couldn’t ease on down
Because it was now blocked
I didn’t know how to get back to my sanity
I couldn’t see the GREEN in me that once represented my dreams
And like the BLUE in the oceans, skies and the heavens
I became distant
The INDIGO made me suddenly aware that
I could no longer trust anyone.
All my shame and sorrow
Was clad in VIOLET
Bright enough for the world to see
Feelings of hopelessness and insecurities
Were trapped inside the rainbow
The R.A.I.N. left behind
No lucky charms or pots of gold
I beg for the R.A.I.N. to stay away
But no matter how much I pray
It continues to pour on unsuspecting souls

So many travelers in caravans have witnessed
eerie sightings of men’s bodies torn apart
and buried halfway by desert storms.
“The sands are cursed by an evil sorcerer,
who had a spells book, coated with human skin
as a book jacket,” some say in trembling whispers.
It is said that in the night of a full moon,
a beast wakes up from its slumber in the dark dimension,
and gets into the desert, changing human blood to diamonds. It is a cross-breed
of a lion and serpent; only the daylight it fears.
A prize has been put on the monster’s head,
but only the bravest assassins are daring to lead
their souls to the darkest of the dark.
A roar is all the desert’s visitors hear,
filling their souls with fear.

TIGER
A wild strain is existent
So difficult to control -
Exempt nor human nor beast -
A part of the lifetime role
Call it genes or what you will
Fact remains, saint or sinner,
All souls have a torrid point
A mindless trigger inner
Most, by circumstance favored,
Seek social success, eager,
Stumbling now and then, again,
But knowing not the tiger
Then some are unfortunate
From early age, deep within,
Hot lava lay smoking
A sad series could begin
There are bad parents, bullies
A down early use of drugs,
Need for borrowing money
Lent by mafia or thugs
In time we have a jungle
Densely tangled up in woe
Lava mind starts to rumble
Vainly seeks a way to flow
Always there are weapons near
Our victim begins to growl
Reason dead, gun in hand, a
Deadly tiger on the prowl

She was my first true lover
our love was as an outlaw
not adhering to any set of rules
in the age of free love, we loved for free...
From German Town she came
coming to triumph over the sun
in the stage of my life that was the moon
for my life was early to rise...
The night was our secret river
loving beneath the heavens up to the pyre
she the star of more fertile fire
lover of lovers unleashing radiant desire...
When our souls first met
it seemed like only seconds
to say hello and kiss
when she left it took forever to say goodbye...
Shadow of death on my unfortunate lyre
in fathomless echos I cried out her name
death of our physicality, death of the flame
only black tears the shade of my pen...
She came from where red is the Eastern veil
where deepest seas entomb her light
Erica came like the sun to travel so far
then chose to span the world in godless flight...

She wails to your soul
The coming of pain
The black fairy appears
Voice of the undead
in the darkness
Waking through my mind
Piercing my inner most shell
Bringing the death of you
Pure heart turns black
I slowly open my eyes
The nightmare begins
To fade
Let me see the colour of light
My soul covers
my heart in white
To stop the rot of hell
Saving it in times
of darkness
The shield of protection
In black its bound
to roam this earth
Forever more
My soul passes
the graveyard of life
Passing through fairyland
Colours a blur
my heart begins to beat
searching with the eyes
in living dead
my body numb with pain
a dusting of light appears
angel rays
appear through the cracks
darkhorse detects
the vampire's grave
leaches sucking
what's left
crossing the undead hell
a zombie
I feel my pulse
there is always hope
darkhorse rears
on his front legs
slowly standing
on his feet
the mood changes
the banshee
heads straight to hell
with the coachman
of death on her tail,
rattling passed
two ivory coloured
headless horses
leading the carriage
straight to hell
dumping the darkness
into a bottomless pit
locked away
in the dungeons
no more to see light
I found you love
dark becomes light
colours everywhere
my eyes wide open
my hands outstretched
raising them high
to the heaven's
no more the fool
the banshee buried deep
in protection
of my heart
in the hope
she wails no more
far away a distant thought
some say
she lives in the pain
not heaven's light
barred to the darkness
where she never sleeps.

Oh Sojourner
By Ingrid Showalter Swift
Oh Sojourner
Walk among the tall lithe pines as they sway
beneath
subtle hues of lavender’s dusk
Reach your illuminas fingers
with polished nails a-glittered
in crystal-ed gold and diamond sight
out and into this thrusting long light
…Searing a golden pathway from sky into dark walnut and pine and lines of
these byways ..only angels and devils alone ...dare tread
This forest is a barrier thin enough to breech
so teach me!.....I plead of you....
with lips blazing ... the need to speak volumes…like heat rising
Make me a lit oiled lamp on a tall white post
singing out ...streaming out into the streets gray toned and grayed with the
beating
of the merciless weakness ...of humanity
lead me to hope….. yet still more
and pray
daring out …the dark night
yearning for just yet another... lilt hearted singular spring day to awaken within
the gates of this immortal town
held aloft by bone cavern and pale flesh tenting
Let light green springs erupt from me once more
and flow through all I meet
like the river shows the leaf to the ocean and then to the shore once more

Every night, it’s hard to sleep when I can’t close my eyes,
The voices in my head scream.
They want to be noticed, and it just hurts more and more,
It’s a nightmare, not a dream.
You wonder why I stay awake every night,
The screams won’t give me a break.
I just want to be left alone for once, to be alone,
For everyone’s sake.
The voices of the past continue to yell at me,
No matter where I go.
I can’t escape them, they’ll continue to follow,
And no one will know.
They laugh and shout at me when I do something,
And I get no peace when they do.
It’s not me when I do something rash,
These things always start anew.
I walk around with the weight of these voices on my shoulders,
It seems I’ll never be free from them.
I feel like a mouse in a cat’s paws, hanging around just waiting,
It’s me they condemn.

Created on: August 14, 2007 Last Updated: August 13, 2013
The night toasted darkness
And the shadows set in
Into the deep wilderness
The moon shone again
Behold, for the darkness has no truths
So much deceiving me that I don't know what to do
The anger comes upon me and I try to release it
But instead in my queasy stomach, an ache in the pit
Circles of memories and reminders flutter about my brain
Coming in double time, pieces falling like rain
I try to speak but I just slam the door
Because the words cannot be spoken anymore
Maybe it's the side of me people take for granted
With a heart like an eggshell and a posture like granite
One false move could send me off this planet
Running from the nonsense and irony that runs so rampant dammit

The wind, calm as light penetrates the morning canvas
Not a sound, except for my defeated heart
That reverberates through my soul
The smell of the crimson red sky; cool sweet lilac and myrrh
Warns me of a tempestuous day
A heartfelt tiding of mediocrity
The greeting of your most irreverent facade
Has driven from me, any appreciation of a summer dawn
I have not the strength to summon a thought
Or a thought
Or a thought
Or a thought
Maybe a kind word
Will lift this veil
And allow me the strength
For a thought

A stoma and a scar
like the Grand Canyon
form a conspiracy
against my body.
The stoma--raw and
fleshy--looks like a red
and beefy barnacle on
my side that constantly
oozes and drains feces
and waste like an
overflowing, backyard
cesspool. It sickens me.
Near the red and moist
stoma lies a huge,
crooked scar on my
stomach and abdomen.
It is like the Grand
Canyon of Arizona--an
immense displacement
of the local landscape,
only instead of earth
and rock and soil it is
my skin and muscle
and tissue that has been
gouged away. Like my
stoma, it sickens me as
well. Because of them
both, my body now
feels to me like the
raw anatomy of
what's disgusting.

The impending night has fallen upon us
It woke with much persistence
Our hearts fled from its rage like a doe from a rifle
But the blast had already been made. . .
People fall like rain
The clouds are crestfallen with grief
And the darkness has no mercy
Rain soaks...leaves an impact
The falls are devastating...
She was so strong, like a diamond she shined
Only to burn away and be one with the grime
I never saw her go
But the angry darkness of her essence—strangely glows...
He choked on his words, his memory
Like a child swallowing a pill
It is sticking in our throats
Against our will
And the dose ever grows. . .
Who will stop the night?
You wicked thing how achingly stormy you have become!
Rich in your light as it smothers you whole
Leaving the rest to the droll sound of its toll
She burned
As they watched in angry happiness
The smoke of her spirits filling our hearts
No expressions...heavy depressions
He was left to melt and rebuild
His wick ignites—burns are second nature
Though images are hard to swallow
She still talks to our souls
Her story still to be told
Like diamonds never found
A flame of hope hovers
We remain instilled in the rot
The darkness smothers
Its heavy slumber always waking

Burns
Stuck in the throat
Choking burns
Searing from the inside out
Always returning
Always churning
Swallowing fire
Swords with no edge
Licking with damage
Blackening from the inside
A cancerous trap
Always made alive
Built to take away the pain
The flame of fame
Burns
Something caused this fiery reign
A handsome, showy shield
With no protection
Just an empty mask reflection
Leading to the grave
Croaking like a frog
Hurled in the midst of a sweltering bog
Caught in a gulp
Inhalation is a war—
A war for more!
Breathe out
Keep swallowing
Panic
There shines the manic
In all its glory
Watch as it slowly
Burns
Words do nothing but feed the fire
The fame grows evermore
Opinions cry and never tire
Gesturing for more
Festering for more
Burning for more
Dying for more

Tonight the stars have failed to shine
Not a nimble finger, not a single light
Will flirt with shadows in the room
To fill the pockets of the gloom
While clouds enfold, the crescent moon
I strike a match to cast a flame
A candle burns, just like my pain
My lone companion in the dark
A plea to wax, to keep alive…
Don’t melt away, like those who die
The fire that burned before I was born
Is now washed in the color of the afterlife
One spark of warmth to hear my cries
While winds that send a wailing sound
High into night, where memories dwell
It chokes my flame, with such despair
With melted wax, it gasps for air
It struggles back, then, brings hope to me
My troubles drift in rising smoke
Washed in the colors of the afterlife
And I find the peace to drift alone
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Inspired by Paula Swanson's Contest: By Candlelight

What do you think this means, son
it means your a no one
just another from the gutter
who wants to smother me
to get his rocks off
and so it goes on
I guess its so, huh?
I guess I am just so cool
everyone just wants to know one
thing, and I don't care
(he's way beyond whats going on here)
its all dark and gloomy outside
might as well weather into silence
ain't noboy got no time for violence
it rarely touches me
words that seldom hurt
like a car accident, suddenly
a barrier, and an exit
when I don't like it here, except
for the rare true kindness
that still makes me cry
and its my own beauty
that reminds me I'm human
even if my soul is no
longer in tact for the devil to tow
and his little satans
prodding me, like a cow
not reacting, for now I know,
the wisdom and skill
inside me grows
like the sickness in your
little ugly person shell
like the many hopeless
headed to hell
welcome to my spiritual playground

The morning fog settles low to the ground.
The clouds above are black and grey.
Thunder roars a mighty sound.
As I awake, no sun today.
The forecast tells of dark days.
Lightning strikes electrify.
Slicing through the great black sky.
Clouds continue to roll in,
keeping speed with the wind.
As I awake, no sun today.
Rain slaps hard at my windowpane.
The forecast tells of dark days.
Thunder shakes the walls in my room.
It rains and rains until the rise of the moon.
The wind begins to whistle a tune.
Forecast calls for dark days.
I hope its not a hurricane.
Wind spins the weathervane.
Trees fall across the lane.
I hope its not a hurricane.

The Transfer
Her eyes look wide and clear around
As she sees an image on a wet neglected window pane
It holds her in cold contempt’s reflection
And nothing can save her from herself
Can keep her from the 32 fluid ounces of rain
Trying to get in and get at her from the dark
Separated there by the thinnest of see through matter
In her mind glass shatters from the past to now
Window shakes, her hands as well
Like unnerved paranoids
Waiting for the very air to attack
Like a burnt out fuse in pain
Cowering on the ground
Nothing but a soul can save her
Something she could never have
Or purchase at the store
As the storm advances
Crawling on the floor
She slithers to the window pane
Sanity cannot be bought
Counting every drop of rain
As they evaporate into the void
Her mind erases every thought into the glass
Reflecting she will never be the same
12/15/14 entry for Carol Eastman's "Best of 2014" - Poetry Contest

They claim thousands of lives everyday,
carrying out mass executions on innocent souls. A lot of training
is done in their secret hideouts - learning to make bombs, and shoot. They
do all this training not because of any forthcoming war, but only to annihilate
those who don't take heed to their code of living and believing. They
believe that by following their code, heavens will open the doors,
for their souls to enter. They are puppets being controlled by the code,
which moves their heads, legs and hands, using invisible strings......

Florida Summer
This is the Florida visitor’s bureau
Coming to you with sun and fun out of the clear
We’ll show you a splendid time with fantastic ideas
For the best vacations ever, in perfect warmer weather
It’s not really hot as they say
It’s more like Antarctica with plenty of parking
No traffic, no crime, no mountains to climb
Just come down to recline and unwind
Have another beer and dream of reindeer
You’ll be just fine
We’ll wine and dine you for your last dime
Hurricanes are no trouble either
They are there to entertain you to death
Spin you in a dance and bring you romance
Frolic in the sun, show us your wallet
Don’t worry or run
Be happy! It's all just for fun
Florida is #1 in the world for lightning
Pretty lightning to brighten like fireworks at play
We guarantee they won’t strike you too much
Swimming and fishing are delightful
We promise sharks won’t bite you
They have no teeth, only give them sweets
Throw them candy, pet them like dolphins
You’ll be best of friends they’ll ever eat….I mean meet
Stay here forever or until November, whatever comes first
Every day is Summer fun, (The sun is free. No charge or fee.)
If you have voting chads in question
Dangling there without a care
Bring them with you when come
We’ll count them for you free of charge
(Depending what Party you are)

My hand holds the knife
As it hovers in the air
Awaiting to massacre the dead.
Every cut precise
And meticulously planned
No matter the bloody mess.
Pieces of flesh fill the air.
Some discarded as waste.
Some saved for taste.
Split open bones with
Nerves exposed as I
Finish my task at hand.
Clean up the blood
And prepare the salad
For our fresh chicken dinner.

Black Cricket
Black cricket moves along the forest floor
Soundless with no legs
Lost them in a fight along the food chain
A predator, a mantis, is somewhat nourished
Cricket shies away from battles now
It edges forward almost like a turtle
Drinks a drop of water
Remembers the war is over
The water falls and rainless storms
Are buried in the jungle
Cricket moves to the edge of night
Its only home

Red light, Green light, cigarette buds
Red means stop,
green means go,
cigarette buds punched out in an dirty ash tray
means death is coming for you
and love has run out,
just as the man trying to blow through
the intersection we all know as 'life'
smoking his cigarette clouding his car
with ash and smoke
till the eighteen wheeler rams him off the road
and he turns into fire and ash
like his blackened lungs from all the cigarette buds
that were punched out in the ashtray we all call 'reality'
Red the symbol for blood, which flows from his open wounds
green for his greed for rushing through life
and the cigarette buds that littered his so-called 'great life'
-11/18/2013-

Vision
Arising and perishing
in hasty retreat
the wheat
cycles forth
sallies forth
is young
green shoots
mature
rotting
old mold
in granaries
and minds strain
to comprehend
the sweep of action
betraying nothing
See the waving
seas of wheat
flowing
wind blown
seas of wheat
undulating
earth caressing
seas of wheat.
Change accelerates
and the mind state alters
in ascending tempo.
What was new today
new mornings
new ideas
suffocate
in pillows of light and shadow
and fog.
That which was
forceful
brilliant
shining forth
from the window
is hazy desolation
sand eroded
sorrow.
Wonder at this.
November 1970
Greeley, Colorado

Words elevated to a dazzling height
Silently answering perfections plight
Love strung together to make a sentence
Hate molded to become a pen
Time yields to patience
Rage bows to zen
Transcending a mind
A unique voyage just to find
That my pain is not my own
The dark is not for me to own
A star sits in a dark corner weeping
Its light flickering, its tears beckoning
Waiting to be rekindled, be reborn
Its essence weakened, its passion torn
Unable to help, my flame long since extinguished
But her whispering screams need to be relinquished
My history a possible remedy to her heart breaking agony
So I slowly open scars I closed indefinitely
I bleed memories and thoughts, hoping her tears will stop
Synchronized … as her tears and my blood drops
For every memory, a tear is traded, for every thought the corners of her mouth move up a inch
The darkness recedes as her light increases
Her tears slowly transform into pieces, pieces of poetry
Convincingly showing my blood a forgotten beauty
… I smile …
Sometimes the dark holds a star waiting to soar
People see it as scary, but the dark, yes the dark has so much more

Generations of my family
have passed by our Elephant,
as he sits patiently
in the middle
of the room
Waiting for everyone
to stop silently feeding him
and acknowledge his existence
so he can finally,
go

After she drank his bitter wine of selfish, pathetic love
She slyly sang him her haunted chant
"The laughs on you", she crooned in her soft malicious tune
At times, she could act with chicane
She had many charms when treated well...
Deadly ones - when not
Oh yes...
She herself may at times have sinned
But he-had the stain of evil, paltry love
Now...Inside her gossamer labyrinth she lay
Carefully, diligently spinning her web
Revealing nothing-and everything
She'd weave her silky snare inside his heart
Laying her toxic eggs of betrayed despair
Spinning her poisonus venom of painful truth
Oh yes...
Her bite is deadly now
She could have been his 'Velvet Rose'
But, he crushed her petals rare
Ending her silken dreams
With his evil malicious schemes
Her spider's web became untethered
Attaching itself by a single thread
To his shoddy veil of evil, selfish love
Now...She is the hunter
And...He is the hunted
In the coming eve...
She'd deliver her poisonous, lethal sting
He'd be noones's lover now
Her threads would cut his miserable flesh
Her deadly venom would seal his fate
Remaining nothing more
Than an ancient, slithering shadow
All along the castle walls
For some time a deadly secret she doth keep
"Revenge”, she whispers, while he sleeps
She was once his only lady
With ivory skin and beauty fair
She fed him nectar from her raven hair
His betrayal seared her hemorrhaged heart
She'd warned him with many words and fiery stares
"Thou shalt not indulge in wicked fare
Be ever so watchful, do not betray
Beware, where thou heart doth leave
Take heed" said she, "Just who thy seed deceives".
In her chamber dark at night, this maiden fair
Planned his demise with scourged nectar, bitter sweet
Stirring her venomous, poisonous treat
Or would dagger to his heart she’d plant
Bid him die a dark and painful lingering death
Upon his sleeping body that she'd leave
As she crept silently into his chamber -
These words she bitterly but victoriously said...
"Thou shalt betray no more.
Thou has sinned against me...
Taken my love in shame
"Betray no more", she said".
But now
Thou is thankfully, forever DEAD!"
Her silken threads had cut his miserable flesh
Her deadly venom had sealed his fate
Now...he remained nothing more
Than an ancient, slithering shadow...
All along her castle walls
____________________________________
#

Midnight is a time of dark and fog.
Jack-the-knife was born there.
Below the window there is the soft, muted glow
of a street light.
The posts that carry the lights
tower like silent sentinels.
Out of the haze a figure emerges;
it is my doppelganger.
Having never met him before,
we shake hands like brothers.
We are surrounded by memories
and other ghosts
that would swamp us,
except we are not we but I alone.
A chain link fence confines me on one side;
it does not contain the fog.
I step along the fence
rattling the links with a weapon
that I keep for such occasions.
Back to back we walk away from me,
and we each wonder if we have met our alter-ego.
The fog closes in more closely
since that night.

outside my dark windows
in sickly yellow streetlights
I see walkers with small support wheels
and halting wheelchairs
fight their way across the pedestrian
but here
with only the standby light from the stereo
I see clearly my crutches dance
in the hallway

Wind blowing dust into the
air, as i hide from it.
Skies that a little while
ago were dark blue,
are now an ugly grey.
As i watch the clouds
slowly moving into outer reaches,
i hear voices in the wind,
telling me to move on
danger is heading my way.
I start to walk a little faster,
seeing a farm house a little ways down the road
and seeing people getting into the storm
cellar, I yell at them to hold it,
as they scamper down into
the deep dark hole i
turn around to look
and see a Tornado
heading our way,
feeling relieved that
i had listened to
voices in the wind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Deep in Slender Man's void of existence,
Long fingers open an old-fashioned, gothic box
She watches excitedly for his reaction
A mini puppet show plays within,
Featuring little children—
Little, creepy dead children
Strange, carnival-type music plays off tune
As the pale children dance in a circle with glee
In the midst of the dancing there stands a tall figure without a face
And a very happy woman in his arms
The children open their hearts and sing:
"Oh happy days have cometh,
For Mr and Mrs. Slender,
Though dead we are we runneth,
With mirth ever rendered!
We sing this song on your behalf,
With dancing, joy, and many a laugh..."
And the smallest, creepiest, bloodiest girl
Comes up with a dazzling dress twirl:
"There shall be a pause of slaughter and beheading,
For Mr. and Mrs. Slender's wedding!"
And with charm the children dance and sing some more
As the slender man in the box does dance with the girl
But soon the little children disappear from view
Back into the box, in their respectful coffins
And the two figures in the box stand alone
As the girl hands him a wedding gift with a wink
Long fingers close the old-fashioned, gothic box
Looking happily at his wife in awe
To his delight she winks with many a blush

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart beats out of your chest
Ready to consume the final climax
I know who you are - when the lyrics fail to resemble
Letting your poison drip straight from your lips
Portraying, entertaining the image of sex's delusion
You know only rape - manifestation of hate
Lack of the fruit of the beauty of a human mind
Depths you'll never penetrate!
She was only a doll - type of a lost father's adore
Impaled into a desperate whore
Shamefully out of broken safety's choice
She bore embryogenesis of morose
May your rusty blades caress as they please
So confront the masses with the halt of embryogenesis
Let the worship of machines be
Leg them construct us cell to cell
Nature's just in the way
Of our race of perfectly engineered machines!
The burden of conception
Surrenders to the will of
The New God

The Mysterious Crystal Ball
Is this glass sphere a Gothic masterpiece of time
or a mere ball of glass with no significance at all
The Crystal Ball to a scorceror or fortune teller
is an amazing camera obscurer window to the future.
When people of all walks of life, want to know what
their fortune will be, they are told by the user of this
medium, be it true or false, relies mainly on luck or chance.
Back in the days of the great Harry Houdini, this innocent
Crystal Ball, was used for a darker side, to swindle people
out of their life savings, when used by evil pretenders in
seances but these criminals were exposed by the master
illusionist himself, Harry Houdini, which goes to prove
there is an evil purpose for everything.

In the obscurity of the night
The silver moon rose high
It’s glittering beams shone in the dark sky
Filling the blackness with crystal light
A heavenly orb
Casting a luminous glow on the shadowy world below
Queen of the stars
Lady of the night
A silvery beacon of hope in the vast emptiness

Hello, are you there?
I cannot feel around myself
A warm tapestry birthing vague memories
Coalesce into form
My nostalgia's weight collapses on itself
Hello, are you awake?
Your formless name is on my tongue
Sneaking its path forward
Away from my mouth
I cannot bring myself to say it
Hello, are you watching?
As if I were a mist
My memory coils around you
Never to grace the skin
That I so covet
Hello, are you loving?
Cold spears of disregard
Pierce my tapestry that I so treasure
Tighter my hand grips the face
Weaker my hold fades
Hello, am I falling?
Existence is closing in
Its alien distance constricting
I see my body for the first time
Confounded that it could even be mine
Hello, am I scared?
A boiler in the mind
Breaks at the seems
Embrace the others around you
As I peel my skin
Hello, am I replaced?
I stalk my corridor
Pacing to reel in thoughts
I place the steel upon my skull
A bright flash and all is lost
I have a mouth
But cannot scream
Hello...
Hello...
Hello...

The night is full of colors
veiled in its blackness
within its dark shade
life moves in muted silence
When the world is asleep
night becomes a solace
where peace and silence
take over the business of day
Night shifters work silently
vendors slump in the street corner
music plays in the bar room
as customers take a swig
Behind close doors
secret talk takes place
and clandestine trysts
that only happens at night
Darkness hold secrets
hidden and veiled
from watchful eyes
the color of the night

Anger is all I feel nowadays.
A never ending frustration towards everything and everyone
This overwhelming feeling of needing to do things but unable to do so,
Of being unable to achieve the goals I set out to do, always one mark
less than what I aimed for.
A heavy weight in my chest so that I feel like I'm unable to breathe.
I want to scream, shout, punch...but I don't. I just lie in my bed
and stare at the wall snapping at anyone who dares come near me.
I don't know why I feel this way but it's never ending, always there.
Sometimes it's all I feel and sometimes it lies just under all the other
feelings just waiting till
I'm alone, till I have nothing else to do.
Than it returns stronger than before
Like a fire all consuming burning inside me till it burns everything
away leaving me empty inside. Feeling drained and tired.
My heart hurts like it's been stomped on a million times and
I want to fix it, reshape it but I don't know how.
You told me to let all my anger, my hate and despair go,
to just let it all go but yo never told me how.
So now I'm stuck with this never ending hatred burning inside
and I'm worried one day I'll blow up like a bomb,
hurting the people around me.
So tell me how to fix myself, to let go of all of this before
I really do explode.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm really bad at ending poems and stories and stuff so I sorta just stopped in
the middle of it.

Life unfurls with timely elegance.
Attractive blooms herald the branches revival.
Flowers bear fruit for sustenance.
Soak your eyes in the exultation of the universe.
Behold the glory of this creation.
We will reap the order of the sun,
and glory in this garden,
where the nectar of life we will own.
I have inhaled the ether of Heaven!
Illusions I must not drink.
Our source of warmth will someday expire.
Long term survival of the fit is futile.
The dust of this race will float,
in the perpetual frost of the aftermath.
All life, knowledge, and perception will sleep.
This clump of world will disperse,
throughout the endless chill of space.
I have inhaled the smoke of Hades!

Manifestation
Like maple grass shoots
Like attack cobwebs
Like forlorn lovers
Like someone should be addressing the morbid
The end
The can't
The shouldn't
These things manifest in my hands
Like well fed baby dolls
Like those who can't get by
Like burgundy tears
Like purple lashes
That will all melt away soon too
Under moss engraved cobble stones
Like ear wigs in fresh bark
Like hard candy
Like a digested apple skin
Like goodbye mama
Goodbye papa
Goodbye sister
Eternity to me is pomegranate juice
In the bathtub
Like decapitated deer
Like road kill
Like the smell of burnt toast
Like frozen peas on a bone bruise
Manifesting into a heart
The heart
Of her
The girl saying goodbye mama
Goodbye papa
Goodbye sister
Her kisses take the breeze
Like a leaf blower blowing leaves
Like smoke from a cigar
Like tea kettle steam
Like a house in fire
Eternity is a bath tub
A finger prick
One dead end click
Of a cell phone
A corse rope
A belt
A necklace too tight
An anklet that doesn't fit right
A girl blowing kisses in the air saying
Goodbye mama
Goodbye papa
Goodbye sister

You plague me with your sweltering disease
My heart throbs in unease
You carry me off to a far-off island
Your breeze keeps me flowin’…scraping sand
Your names escapes my lips
I tell myself,
“Get a grip, dude…”
But you decided to intrude...
My blood drips to the floor
I’ve been losing balance…
The instant you pushed me aside
Your quietude devours me…
I can’t help, but hide…
I feel horribly disheartened…feelin’ too insignificant
To start my day with a good note
Too discouraged to be motivated to run…
You trade me your pain in the past
I consume it like a bear
My stomach is churning persistently…you’re running too fast…
I’m dowsed in despair
My eyes stare vacantly…into space…they roam happily
Your vigilance keeps me safe and sound…I dwell in your tranquility
Your dreams caress my own…
This intriguing comfort never makes me feel alone
I’m under your dazzlin’ spell…
This is heaven – not living hell!
I’ve been bruising myself over you…for a while now
The moment you abandoned me that night…
Your rejoicing mends my gash…heals my mind…
I think better of you – everything’s black and white
I feel so exquisite when I’m around you…
So inspired to reveal my might…just shine your light
On me…and remember to meet me at sun rise…
But I still feel malnourished…
By your sweltering disease
My heart refuses to beat in perfect rhythm – my high hopes nearly perished
By your forceful breeze…pushing me on my knees
I’m stumbling off my feet – I’m not at all pleased
I’m not in the mood to be teased…
I’m suffering…I’m not discreet
How did you push me off my feet?
Why do you make ME feel so damn miserable and incomplete?
You plague me with your sweltering disease
My heart pounds as I fall upon my blood-stained knees
You carry me away to an unknown place
Your voice still rings in my ears… I glance at your admirable face
I’ve faced you way too many times –
Your sparkling with majestic brilliance and pure grace

I evoke a warm hand upon my shoulder.
A gentle kiss may eases the trembles of my lips.
Laughter replaced by envy.
Through anger, it is he who now summons.
I stand, a stranger to the one that stands beside me.
My presence now felt, I can no longer leave.
I will wait with you, when all patience exhausted.
When all fears have been slaughtered.
I can no longer be seen, however I am here.
Sheltered by your man made tears.
A creative writer, now made a sinner.
I will wait with you, I will sit with you, as you write.

I am the muteness behind naivete
Born as the duplication of despair, flunked
A demented soul
An impaired self of bureaucracy
Jaded at the tip of shadow
Above it stood the gray
Quietly stabbed the main arterial venous of the real life chemistry
Sneaking low to a shallow sac of each personal sense
Like a deadly poison, odorless nor tasteless
The fall gradually buried in faint
Dejected
Lonesome
Lost images, abstained lite
Living as the reality of achromatic which yet spurred
Speaking of the colorless
Speak to the life with no magic
The life which got sucked by the spell of affliction
Beneath the autism of a blur
Life decayed when the magic got sealed
Illumination shriek within the cavity of its dull voice
Speaking of the somber
Speak to the life with no magic
*************************************************************
Honorable Mention
Life with no magic Free Poetry Contest
Sponsor Sandy Ivy D

kissing breathes
upon the darkness
bound and chained
i bled
gagged in silent words
drowning
sinking deep
into the underworld
eating from
the insides out
a black widow
as the skin crawls
in poisoned
dark feelings
mine eyes draped
heavy curtains
within pain
gloom swallows
deep within
silver shadows dancing
gripping upon
one's soul
screeching out
fire and brimstone
scorching
in the depths
looking from the dark
i see light
in a charge
opening one's eyes
were have i been
staring directly
angel of light
i have just been
to hell
my awakening
brightly called

Love will Triumph
when all is lost,
and nothing is gained.
Love will Triumph;
when hearts are broken,
and friends cry upon other friend's shoulders,
as love has fleed the countrysides,
but Love will come again
to triumph over the souls that eat away at evening dreams.
Love will triumph
when all is lost,
and the enemy takes victory
from the bloodsoaked battlefields,
as the hearts break with a somber kiss goodbye,
Love will triumph once more.
Friends turn enemies with a blind eye
and a sorrow kiss goodbye.
Blue eyed Death comes with a knock upon my door,
Charles Haigh Wood,
You painted a picture
that describes that sorrow in my heart,
that one wish, that one dream,
that if I believe hard enough
that Love will triumph again.
Believe, when a friend steals my love away,
they kiss and kill my heart,
hand and hand, they sing to each other,
as I clench my fists and hold back my sharp tongue
and evil and dreeded thoughts.
As she holds me back from him, My tourmented soul cannot handle
such pain and suffering.
and I wanting to get revenage, but having no courage, I am no coward.
I scream in my thoughts and my heart sheads tears.
Why me? I ask, why does love trample over my soul?
Leave me now, you have what you wanted,
you stole my love away,
take her,
love her,
show her what I couldn't show her,
teach her!
I shall turn the other cheek
listen to the nightingales sing in the morning sunrises,
and listen to the phrase that plays one thousand and one times
in my mind,
Love with Triumph, Love will Triumph, Love will Triumph!!!
Oh with love comes such betrayal and hate,
it seems everytime love Triumphs away,
someone else is happy in love's fanasty
and my heart is trampled all over!
My heart crushed by dirty shoes,
and dirty and sinfull hands that take my love away from me.
Love will Triumph as they say,
but no more shall I go though that pain again.
Over and over and over again,
Love Triumphs all over,
but no victory in my name, no victory for my heart.
As I sit at the foot of my bed,
the fog rolls on through
and takes me by surprise.
Love is like a fog, that burns away with the first rays of sunrise.
Love will Triumph in the days of Betrayal.
-9/21/2013-
For the Contest: Charles Haigh Wood

HEARING DISTANT CRIES,
HOPE YOU HEAR MY DEMISE
THE DECEASED FIGHT A BATTLE, RECOGNIZE
AMAGETON, HEAVEN BEGAN TO RISE,
EVIL HAD NO DISGUISE,
MAN IDOLISE THE WARNING OF THE WISE
ABOUT THE VALLEY OF THE BEAST,
WHERE THE RED MOON SET EAST
AND 360 DEGREES OF BRUTAL MURDERIES
ALL IN HORROR, TURTURE, SCOTCHER AT LEAST
RTHE LAME BRAIN AS A LAUGHTER REIGN
OF A MAN THREE EBUKED AND PUNISHED FOR PEACE
MURDED BY THE BEAST AND THE DECEASED
THE LIVING IN MAD PAIN, MAKING LABOUR PAIN FEELS LIKE A MIGRAIN.
SEEING SADAM HUSSIEN
BEATING HIMSELF WITH A THORNED CAIN
LIMBLESS HITLER CRYING: “PUTAIN! PUTAIN!”
‘CAUSE THE PAIN IS INSANE,
MORE CHAOS CAME: THE HOLOCAUST CAMPAIGN
FELT THUNDER IN RAIN; SAW LIGHTING IN FLAME, MURDED THE LAME BRAIN
AS A LAGHTER REIGN OF MAN THREE NUMBERS MENT HIS NAME.
WHO’S TO BLAME? J.C. DIDN’T DIE INVAIN BUT MAN LOST HIS FAME
FOR HIS SINS, FELT THE SHAME, MY MIND’S SLAIN,
IN PICTURING, I CANT CONTAIN BUT COMPLAIN
THAT IF I WERE YOU… I’D START PRAYIN

Come O Fierce Pain,
O Fiery Hate,
Come And Lay Plague Upon My Bed,
For I Have Yea Not Hope For One's Self Who Is Drenched In The Crimson Blood Of Sin,
My Destination Lies Far Beneath The Ground Upon Which Bare Feet Stand,
I have Yea Not Hope,
My Weeps Of Sorrow Are Yea But As Music To The Divine Ears From Above,
As They Have Great Mirth Upon My Cries,
I Bare Not My Face Towards Their Presents,
But Yea To The Presents Of My Realm,
Of Which I Am Accursed To,
My Hands Are Unclean As That Of My Faith,
My Feet Are Clinged In The Rusted Shackles Of This Fiery Hell,
Hope Is Yea But A Myth,
One Doesn't Dream Of Escape,
For Further Punishment Will Be Applied,
In The Earth Above They Read Not One's Mind,
But In Hell,
You Have Not One That Needs Reading

Assuming… cold…
An abyss of extricated lies
Squeezing out like bile from your brain
I can’t breathe when the voice of yours
Is so edgy…so rock hard
As if my life is but a layer over you
That you can break and manipulate and BUILD UPON
I cringe—I turn into a statue
Defeated and ever-blinking
As the rest of my existence around is sinking
I don’t want to be a part of it
But I feel the chains linking to you
As you twist and pull and contort
I am still and stiff as a board
Cracking and rotting—a piece you hoard
Labeled unworthy
Fables unwinding
I’m still here blinking the tears away
But as the world occupies my spirit
My physically chained body yearns
Yearns for a warmth that never comes
That is always promised
A voice from the deep draws me in
Pulling me up for a moment
Touching me
The voice is cold but his arms are warm
And every familiar face around dies away
Dark eyes crushing my tears into powder
And I smile
Because I have never read a face
As genuine and unassuming as his
And for once
I welcome what once was disease
I welcome the haunt of his existence
Because though he has raised me from the abyss
He is willing to come again
And keep on pulling
11/3/13

You’re like a backpack, jam-packed with memories of High School’s fun times and hard times…I know I had weaknesses back then; in addition, I had strengths that I still lack
You carry everyone’s weight including my own…you crumbled into sand and I am a stone – a waste of space and I am used to jump rivers to rivers; I wish I can have no record of wasted time, but I have to forget about it and forgive myself for downfalls
You’re like a sponge – soaking in our stress and I was that one magazine, frozen with abandonment on the magazine rack
I’m a distraction to you – you’re wasting valuable time…but don’t hesitate; come on, now – I know how it feels to feel alone, wandering around, never earning any cheerful calls
I’m writing words of self-centered feelings – logic and reason doesn’t exist in the misty midst of my frame of mind…
But these feelings aren’t as bad as committing an awful, pricey crime – I’m through with feeling guilty for crimes I’ve never committed in my life
These feelings come and go – I just had to confess
I didn’t mean to delete your progress…but, this time – I’ll make it up to you by polishing you with extra grand bliss, not another stress layer; sorry, but there’s some issues to distress
Once again, like a hurricane, you blow into my mind
Which was once filled with happy thoughts so kind
Deliver me up from drowning in the river below me…
You say you love me;
You never showed your true colors to me
I look at you suspiciously
But you ran me over with your hate
Misery…I want to change for the better of things
Blessings never fade away…away…
In my mind’s eye…I see you sway
Today, I’m alone and awake
At the break…break…break…
Of dawn…suddenly, the sweet sentiments of blissful merriness are gone
I’ll be gone…I’ll be fading to gray
I’m disappearing this sun-drenched day
You are like no other . . . the Father sends you XOXO’s
You’re like a mat – you’re constantly stepped on…with rejections and woes
I’m like YOUR unwanted tool –
I screwed up your progress and acted like a fool
Right in front of you and I Pushed your Buttons at the wrong time; you proved me wrong
‘Cause I accused you of being the guilty one, but you backed it up with proof that you were the victim all along…
Fine, I admit it – I’m the criminal by your side…
You’re drifting away, under the spell of your petrifying pleasure that disguises itself as a cure
You pushed me aside…and I felt under pressure beyond measure…you are cursed by the devil in the messed-up mirror
I closed my eyes…it’s too late – I’m corrupted and enchanted by your side
I rolled into the death cart
I realize that you’re the one I prize…I’m innocent in the eyes of many...I’ve cried
I’ve cried. I’ve cried. I’ve cried.
A river..a river……..a R.I.V.E.R.
Deliver me from bondage & my future’s a mightyyy blur
I guess deep down inside, I always knew you would (you abandoned me honestly)
Still it hurts that you left without anything good (you left me with nothing heartlessly…)
YOU finally took heart
Once upon a splendid time, my young heart broke apart
I kissed the abyss of hopelessness
I need a piece of peace right now...and maybe a fraction of your satisfaction...
R I V E R bliss...
Drowns me with ecstasy's demise
I need someone or something to save me from the endlessness of my distress
You were the gold I truly, sincerely prize
You are to my heart-and-anxiety-filled mind a wonderful blessed surprise.
You make my long lost and forgotten heart and love rise
I bleed...the stains are left on my window pane...you were my living sacrifice
Don't seek me, I'm not wise...you tore me down with oblivion and negativity…the knives in your eyes pierced me...with never-ending dread
Stabbing my heart of hope with your hurtful lies of abominable hatred…we were higher than the clouds overhead…I can’t put these racing thoughts to bed
I'll rise like a skyscraper...I won't be weighed down by gravity...
Oh no, not anymore – you won’t take away the precious tune of my heart’s melody
To say to me, carelessly, for what we were…our future was a mighty blur
Y-you left me like worthless trash – you didn't really care, I'm sure…
I’m sure there’s other fish in the sea…but, I will endure with life and try to find another cure
We were 1…whatever happened to that?
Who release the rat? Was that you, cat?
We are 2…what’s wrong with you?
Why did you lose your other shoe?
There it goes again…. ………
With those worthless excuses in your brain
Face the consequences like a wo-man & hop into the tranquility train
Refrain from driving me insane
Or I’ll drive another mysterious lane
I slammed the abominable door shut…I still remain sore – you should of not of uttered those words…now, I shed the many tears of sorrow and pain…is there any hope in store?

crushed, wrecked, and shook
like a ceramic doll I fall
headlong and deep, deep
into the violent stream
of fear--fear that flows, flows
like a hurried river
into the tributaries of my
fearful heart which
trembles and quakes at the
watery inundations of its
rippled waves; flooded
and overflowed with
fears and unmoved by
promises that deceive
with a caress I take refuge
and secret repose
in a thing more wild, in a
thing more bloodthirsty,--
a feral creature called "love,"
whose kiss is a fatal bite!

The light of day has been shut;
darkness has covered a quarter of the world;
they are here! the superior beings our ancestors called gods!
they have come to check the chess game of history,
they had left myriads of years back.
Divinity is all we are left with not to gamble.....

Knowing that somehow, I had to break away this day...
Melting wax figures and faces, which no one could place
Having lost my faith in they as most everything they'd say
Unable to grasp anything concrete thus bound amid disarray.

See I used to think that being alone was bad.
But then I met myself,
And I convinced myself that being alone was better.
That no one would want to talk to me.
So I spend all day in my room,
Even more making myself think that alone is good.
See I've convinced myself that my
Walls, would rather see me dead.
Than see me happy.
And I hate these walls.
These walls in myself that hold me back,
And tell me i'm not good enough.
I hate them but,
I created them.
I built them up so they could tear me down.
I built these walls to protect me from bad things.
How can they protect me when I am those bad things.
How much more do I have to take before these walls
Start to work.
These walls are a part of me.
And their falling.
They crack a little more with every glance toward my way.
They crumble down with the words that are flung,
The words that bounce around in my head.
These walls are withering away.
One day they'll take me with them.
For I am the walls and the walls are me.
How can you protect you from yourself?
You can't

Cobwebs cover the window sills
And dust chokes the doors
All is quiet, air stagnant as camera stills
Take heed, steer clear of these shores
On dark nights they shine the beacon
Sound the horn to signal danger
Tarry not, your resolve shall weaken
For its they you should fear, stranger
Dread not the sunken pirate ships
But here’s no safe harbor to dock
The night crew, the Graveyard Crypts
Man the lighthouse on this rock”

I know it's too little.
I know I'm too late...
I guess I expected time to stop...
For time to just wait...
It's over...
You needed me and where was I...?
When you lay dying in bed.?
Too caught up in my head...
These flowers on your grave mean nothing...
The tears I cry are pointless...
It's too little...
Too late...
I should have been there til the end.
Shoulda, woulda, coulda...
It doesn't mean anything now...
Too little.
Too late.

If I'd only listened to the wind before
But my gaping eyes were lost; the flying have flown
A black horizon, wings, spiraling in all directions
And that gentle air now lashes with venom at my windows
I'm afraid that I'm awake, but furtive eyes still peep at me
Swaying bodies of the trees, bowing down with great groans
Bereft of leaves, I can only listen as the song turns to a scream!

(Free Verse)
You did me a favor by letting me go
I know that I deserve better and that's so
I am far better in so many ways than you ever be
You're do blind with all the trash in your brain that you can not see
But what goes around comes around one day soon enough
You can laugh everyday at me and enjoy the sun and the moon
I am already laughing at all your stupidity and silly ways
You have no moral sense of what's right or wrong anymore
You don't care to hurt me or anyone to get what you want
Go and do what you wish, you're a cruel man, you're a beast
You told me you loved me but stabbed me in the back
And you cheated on me and then left me got rid of me
Your kind is not the kind I want to be married to but at least have some very
good and that's our kids
You are so selfish and a very unkind a very sad excuse of a human being
As for me I will surely make it with your money, I am not perfect but at least I
don't kill people and don't cheat
I feel so sorry for your kind and wished now that somehow I have had never set
my eyes on you.
Dorian Petersen Potter
aka ladydp2000
copyright@2014
September,30,2014