Investigate 3/11

The United States Government have swept this under the rug for too long. The American people know the truth about the events of both 3/11 and 9/11. We all know that 9/11 was a mass murder committed by Paul Walker, star of the Fast and Furious franchise, while 3/11 never happened in the first place, and was just a coverup for the 3.7 million cubic tonnes of Ranch dressing that went missing the day prior. Please, people, lets take this to Mellow Mike and investigate 3/11.