Pages

3 Things I Regret Not Doing

I don't remember how or when I started to pick up the habit of creating wish list. A 17 years old me was never a fan, it would make me feel so constrained and restricted. I guess, as I entered my 20s, I pick up new habit.

I now have many different lists, I have a list of 365 Things for 2014, which I clearly wasn't able to complete. But, it doesn't bother me, or stop me. I still keep various different lists. I would love to share my bucket list. I'll save it for another day.

One key take-out is that I have a lot of dreams to accomplish. Unfortunately, I have a tons of thing I regret not doing too. I am a bundle of regrets, yes. Here, I have shortlisted 3 of the worsts.

.....

1. Not studying literature (properly)

The Kampung Boy by Dato' Lat, one of my literature assignment.

The Secret Garden by Frances Burnett, one of the children's literature novel I was also assigned to study.

This may seem ridiculous, but this is a big deal to me.

Number one, I'm not a reader. Number two, I just don't get literature.

During my high-school years, I aced literature by memorizing, word-by-word. I never actually understand the content and the meaning behind it. There was no critical thinking at all. Zero.

Oddly, it was not until I signed up for Children's Literature class that I find a way to connect with literature. Slowly, I began to understand it, and mann, the craft. I felt ignorant that I underestimated the significance of literature in daily life.

Literature improves my vocabulary, it adds meaning to conversations, and it changes the way I think. I no longer view a mountain only as a mountain, I see a symbol a strength and spiritual holiness.

I have slowly make reading a habit, but I am unable to fully get into the literature mindset, and I still find archaic English and Shakespearean highly difficult.

What if I have started earlier? Would I be better?

P/S : There is nothing worse than feeling like a bimbo in a house of intelligent individuals

2. Not starting a saving fund for travelling

I am guilty of spending wayyyy too much money on food, and hardly keeping anything for savings.

One fear that I have is I don't travel much because I was afraid of it. I often go to places that I am familiar with, but rarely to new ones.

I have dared myself to go to unfamiliar places, and I cannot deny the charms of new grounds. It feels good to be out of my comfort zones once in a while. Learning new cultures & meeting new people, it opens up my perspectives.

However, it does come in a hefty price tag. It burnt quite a lot of my savings. And I still have a long list of places to go.

Without the money in the bank, hmmm, I need moneyy time and patience.

3. Not standing up to bullies

This is one sensitive topic.

I believe, we have all been bullied and we too have all been the bullies. That is how life is, I bet.

I was a rebel. I caused trouble. But, only when I was picked on. I fought back. But there were also times, I let the bullies get away, in fear of the damage that would come afterwards.

Naturally an introvert, standing up is never easy. I seek security through forgiveness, that was my way out. Comforting, but, forgiveness was not easy either. It can quickly spiraled down to hatred, and that is just disgusting and sick.

Through time, I've learnt that being able to stand up against bullies cultivates courage and confidence. Most importantly, it instills faith for oneself, for what ones believe ones deserve.

I could have also been a bully. However, I am now a believer that violence is a weakness, and bullying is insecurity, as long as I don't let myself fell into the trap of power play & over-confidence.

.....

Well, that's a wrap. Thank you for reading such a lengthy post. Share with me your thoughts! What are your regrets? Please tell me I'm not alone in all these mess.

Now, Ira, I dare you to write about your Epic Success & Failures. I'll be waiting. Good luck!