Best sherdog post ever: Gospel of nick diaz.

And then the Pharisees DeSantis and Gross pressed him on the issue, saying, "Rabbi, why must you advocate the use of the forbidden weed?" And Master Diaz replied:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Master Diaz
For the record, right now, I think someone needed to come out and say it: I think smoking pot is good for mixed martial artists. It's a new day and age, this is, uh, the year ... **** year is it? I don't know, because I've been training and smoking pot like I should, instead of paying attention to other bullshit, which I don't do.

What I do is, I fight. So you know, I get on the ball and I do what I gotta do. And it's funny, to come home, to fucking crash out, I don't drink a bunch of — I don't drink a shot of whatever and pop a bunch of Vicodin like everybody else.

I don't see what it is about the way these people want to tell us — we're mixed martial artists, right? I mean, you don't tell your musical artists how to write their music, right? I mean, if you told them that and you said, "Hey, no drugs for you," or "No alcohol for you," or whatever, and you go back in time, you try to find me one musical artist that was any damn good whatsoever.

Just think of one, right now.

I mean, you can't! Already — got you right there! You should've been able to think of one in 5 seconds, you know what I mean, that was any damn good without it. I said, **** no, there is not one person that was any good, that was successful at all, unless they were fucking choking to death on their own vomit, every last one of them. They all — well, you know.

I don't know about you guys, but I like my rock stars choking on their own vomit and uh, you know, what's it matter anyways?

Whereupon Master Diaz praised the almighty Father:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Master Diaz
Making weed illegal is a little bit paranoid, don't you think? It's like saying God made a mistake, you know what I mean? It's like, you've got the whole world and Earth and all its holy creations, right? And God is like, "Hmm, lookit, my whole world in all its holy ways," and he's like, "Oh-my-me-oh-****, I left weed in here. Yeah right, I left weed in here. Oh, shouldn't have smoked that joint on the third day."

Like, what the ****? You think he forgot? I mean, just looking at it from a religious point of view or something like that. Oh ****, now he's gotta create Republicans, right, or something or whatnot. I don't know, I'm just irritated that I get suspended and that put a dent in my career because I want to smoke some weed.

Then, verily, he smote down vice and proclaimed the virtues of Life Most Simple:

Every fighter I know wants to move there and wants to live there. You gotta be kidding me. These fucking assholes. I mean — I love it, because they're that dumb, I'm like, "I can't wait to fight 'em, they're so stupid."

They thrive off these big fucking fake-titty mutant chicks that are fucking disgusting whores, every last one of them. They're all trying to do something to get somwhere, or if they're out there they're trying to fucking do it up with their old man somewhere else.

It's just like, and regardless, you're there — if I were there, I'd be there to meet some people, you know, like some endorsement deals, some things or whatnot. These people, they end up wanting to live there and move there. All they do is go out and drink and they can't — they all drink. Even the ones that — even athletes there that don't drink, the other ones force them into drinking and they don't go out and stand around drink water like I do. I've seen 'em and they all fucking move to Vegas and they go to these clubs and it's just like, "Dude you are fucking kidding me."

You know, I feel like I can go out there and live somewhere in a place like that — probably not that place, ever, I can hardly stay there for a fucking week, I hate it there, honestly — and then you know, make some money for myself, move back here, to some little spot, you know what I mean, where there's fucking a vineyard on the side of it and I can shoot rabbits outside of my door with a shotgun and nobody's gonna say **** to me. That would make me happy.

And as the Pharisees fell silent, Master Diaz ascended Mt. Beatdown and laid forth the principles of the Weedatitudes:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Master Diaz
The fact of the matter is, if you go home — okay, I'm gonna tell all you fighters out there something right now, from my experience — if you have friends that you get high with, get 'em to train with you.

Because you get high all the time, you can't find people that train all the time. But if you get high and train, you will get high and train all the time together and it will be fucking massive-takeover-smoke-weed-and-kill-people ****.

And then, not to mention, when you're done, you know, you guys are probably all going to get high together at whoseover house's cool, and probably all go and get a whole shitload of groceries at the store, go home and cook 'em. Instead of trying to make it out of the gym early to the club before it closes — or for instance we close around here around 2 o'clock — so people will be taking off trying to go early, trying to make it to meet whoever,whatever, this and that, yadda yadda, drinking a little bit of alcohol, can't go there without drinking — it could be a little bit easier to just fucking smoke a bowl and then crash out until you wake up and do it all over again, see what I mean?

Not to mention when you don't want to go, when you feel like **** and you fucking don't want to train anymore — if you go ahead and get loaded, then you might not give a **** what you're about to go do, you just go do it. So you know, for all you fighters out there, it might be what you need, instead of fucking sticking that needle in your ass.

Because I'm telling you right now, these people that fucking do steroids, you know what I mean? I'm like, I wish everything was legal, because that would give them the chance to go out there and make their mark and then burn the **** out. And that's when I come in with my consistency, because I'm coming.

The street argument is retarded. BJJ is so much overkill for the street that its ridiculous. Unless you're the idiot that picks a fight with the high school wrestling team, barring knife or gun play, the opponent shouldn't make it past double leg + ground and pound - Osiris