Sunday, September 28, 2008

The Secret

We all love Sundays! Even if your Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays are no different, A SUNDAY SHALL REMAIN A SUNDAY! Its special :)

Woke up with a feeling as if Mom is still angry... Then I realised "IMPOSSIBLE! I gave her such an awesome back massage last night." She was reading the newspaper. In bed, thought of giving a 'Good Morning' call to G. Nah! Lets start my day with Mom today, instead. I wanted to keep my head on her lap. Haven't done that in many days. She has of course read about the Delhi blasts. "Today your cousin called. She is coming from her university for three four days.""Yeah! I know she called to ask me about my travelling plans. Sadly, I won't be here.""I told her you are not going."Shit! I knew this was coming up! Damn! Why the hell do mothers have such a frail heart! Why of all people will I die in some blast? And why will there b any blasts? Moms!! Sigh!I just give her the look."What can be so important, R?""Work mom!" I AM SUCH A BITCH! SUCH A LIAR! It is my first time - scared but it is turning out to b exciting."Let it be no. You are not going! That's it! At least obey me once!""Mom! We shall see. You do not get such opportunities again and again. Let me go for it. And then... I'll be safe. Don't worry."I HATE THE TYPICAL MOMMA EXPRESSION!"Mom, look... If something has to happen, it can happen to me right now right here. No place no time is safe. Come on!""Oh! Today is Daughter's Day", looking at the paper."Thank God! We finally have a day! Otherwise we would have spend our lives celebrating only Father/Mother/Teachers Day."Thank God the conversation broke. Maybe she did not say anything because it was Daughter's Day. But hey! She did not wish me! (STARE!)

Door bell rings.My maid finds out it is some 'thin guy' on the door for me. I am scared. I think it is this really annoying old school friend of mine who considers me his best friend and I can not stand him for even a second! Actually he had called last night and I just hung up on him. He had called when I was having cyber sex with G. He was on cam and I could see his Tom(I JUST named his dick, right now! Didn't feel like writing 'could see his DICK'! Its cute to give names (winks). By the way, I did not cum last night. Not too fond of cyber sex. There was so much to do. See, type, finger, imagine! Too much to cum but enough to stimulate you. G likes it! And I love him on the cam. He has a smile to DIE for. I get to see him smile! But when he is not smiling and has his serious look on, he looks like some extremely boring IT professional. So, I ask my maid to ask for his name and say I am asleep. She tells me "Mix!" Oh Fuck! My friends had planned to come over in the morning. "Oh! Stop him stop him stop him!" Friends come over. We have fun. Breakfast was of chips and 7-up. Showed this other friend from the group, N, my lingerie shopping. Also showed her the B'Day card G had sent me. That card was the best gift!

Later, B joined us too. P was finally meeting him today. I have no idea how did she manage to convince him, but they were meeting! He came! N and I made faces. Mix is a loyalist of B and P...forget it. N and I make faces. Oh! And I also have to look inviting for B. Ggggrrr... Finally B came and begins talking to me "You and S have nothing better to do in life than brainwash P.""What makes you think WE brainwash P?"S and L had left before he came."The day P starts talking rubbish I know she has spent time with you guys or spoken to either of you at length.""So? What's between friends remains between them. I don't think anyone has the right to comment on that. And P is an intelligent girl. She ain't an immature kid who can be brainwashed.""Of course! She is immature!""P! Hear it for yourself. Your guy thinks you are 'immature'."Silence.I was jumping inside. I loved he confronted and I loved replying the way I did. Though I was shocked P did not have to say anything at all. She was mute throughout this conversation, like any other listener wanting not to interfere because it is not his/her business. I forgot - P is smitten by B and P has lost self respect!Everyone leaves.

It is afternoon. G and I still have not spoken. He was having lunch when I called. We spoke an hour later. I was angry. There is some random guy who has been calling me for a while, who is apparently in love with me, saw me in my college (Its a girls college! Confused!) and found out my number. Have been ignoring him for days. Convincing G I'll handle on my own. Finally I give this random guy a piece of my mind, all this while I was being decent cause he was being the same. Anyway, thankfully, he did message after that call and called again too, but I literally pleaded which probably inflated his ego and he apologized for harassing me. Swore not to call again! Sigh! Thank God! G called. I was upset. Mom had brought up the travelling issue again at lunch. Cribbed cried and confessed, "I am scared too to travel somewhere down the line, but I REALLY want to come and see you." "To be honest, I am scared too. Don't come if you are not feeling good.""The problem is I have K's ticket too."K, my best friend stays in a different city. I have told mom I am going to K's city for work. Instead I will go there but we leave for our city of love, where our louvres are."Post her, her ticket."After allot of thinking."I don't know. I really want to come... What do you want me to do?""My situation is similar to yours. I was travelling on the 15th of August to see you. You too wanted to meet me but not at the cost of my safety. I feel the same."I cry."Are you chumming?""No G!", with a smile."You are close. It will start today evening."He knows how to make me smile, laugh, turn me on, keep me happy, take care of me, love me... He is just so amazing! (hearts flying on the head)"So, when do I bang you next?""Going by what I like, today! Going by what I want, next week!""You do not want to do it until you are here.""No.""You want to build a momentum?""Yes."We talk."Are you wearing a white bra?""No! A skin coloured lace."

We had phone sex. And it was great. When I went to wash myself, I screamed with happiness. I had started PMS-ing finally! Wuhoo! I was running late. My date was around 23rd. G and I got scared thinking what if I start when I come there. That would be extremely sad!

"You have never been so happy for your chums, isn't it?""I have! Every time my period gets delayed, I get all panicky. So, when they start I feel so relived and happy."He calculated if they will get over by the time I am there. And yes, they will!"You know, I use these ultra thin sanitary pads. So each pad comes in a packet which can be used to wrap and throw the used one. So that wrap is a very cute green. I am in love with that color. It is so cute. I will show it to you!""Only a woman can talk like that.""Well... yes! A woman is the most beautiful creation of God.""I don't understand how can a woman cry on everything. I have not cried in ages.""You wanted to cry when you were leaving me.""Yes, but I did not. I am not saying I am the macho guy who does not cry. I just do not understand why does a woman cry?""Well, because a woman feels every emotion completely, from deep within and so gets easily overwhelmed. I am so proud to be a woman. It is the best thing on this planet. A woman can cry when she wants to, be strong, make a family, earn her own money, live independently, take care of herself, love like no one else can. She finds happiness in small things. Like, only a woman can find her sanitary pad wrap cute and fall in love with it. A woman will bond with her girlfriends, shop for sexy lingerie and be excited about it even if she does not have anyone to show it off to. The reason they feel so genuinely for everything without holding any bars makes them all 'overwhelmed with emotions' all the time. That is the reason we always love mothers, daughters, grandmothers more. And that woman is not being true to herself and can never be happy who has misinterpreted the meaning of a 'modern woman' and believes in only making money."Silence..."G?""hhmm..?""Did you just take a nap?""No! You deserve an Oscar!"It is my second. I got the first one on some other long speech that I gave him. :)

In the evening I was checking what movie Mix has on his pen drive. Saw some 'The Secret' on it. It was about The Law of Attraction! I was getting absorbed. It was a documentary on what and how does Law of Attraction work.

All my life I had strongly believed in the power of energy and vibes. What you want is what you will get if you give out the right energies. I was sure of its power when I read "When you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true" in The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. It became my favorite book for this one line and shall remain that way. I know and believe in the power of an active sub conscience, deja vu and all of that. S, too had told me about the Law of Attraction. She was wanting to use it on some guy she liked.

What I, alone believed in all my life and thought was my ultimate power - the [power of thought, is actually a scientific law! As significant as the Law of Gravity. Great men like Shakespeare, Einstein, Lincoln knew of The Secret but never revealed it because what they were was because of this secret. I have done the same so far. I never shared this power I believed in with anyone. Maybe because I was not that sure, yet it did make me feel powerful. Every time I experienced a deja vu, it gave me a sense of pride, a feeling of self control and power. Now, I need to use it on my trip. I of course do not want to attract bomb blasts.

I have not watched the full video. It is a 90 minute one, seen 37 till now. Had to leave out for dinner. Thankfully Mom wished me 'Happy Daughters' Day' after I reminded her to do so. She had planned to get me chocolates but forgot, so asked my preference. I asked for a pastry instead. She slapped my tummy and said "You will never watch your weight no?" A smile. But I really hate PMS for two reasons, 1) The cramps, and 2) The stomach BLOATS! And I have to see my guy in some days! :(

Will write more about The Secret, when I watch more of the video. It got me completely excited. I told G about it and said, "You never know... you might have been a result of my law of attraction... Because you are perfect... Perfect for me!" And I got a BIG E-HUG! The Secret was the highlight of my day!Kisses...

Keep attracting what you want!

Love 'n' Peace!

P.S. : G is in love with Elton John, Guess that's why they call it the blues and he is trying to sing it for me over the phone. I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS GUY LIKE CRAZY!

This is the choice people like me have made in our relationships and for us Sex and Love are quiet interconnected. You may like to call it 'making love' - the 'emotional' term for sex. But what remains is - Sex is an extension of love, just as hugs and kisses are.