Memo to Sammy: You’ve become quite opinionated in your retirement. The problem is that at this point, you are about as relevant as Manti Te’o’s imaginary fake dead girlfriend. You received 12.5% of the vote this year, you’re not getting in… Ever… Get over it…

You should have thought about this before you took PEDs if you wanted to get in so badly. You have plenty of money that you made from putting up HOF-like stats while juiced and we can’t take that away from you, so enjoy it and try not to blow it. But you’re not getting in the Hall of Fame. Not happening, nope, no way…

P.S. – Sammy, you have a better shot of becoming president of the Dominican Republic than getting into the MLB HOF. I suggest you concentrate on that… Or, you can just pretend and be in the “imaginary fake MLB Hall of Fame.” That type of thing seems to work for athletes these days.

Mike Cardano is the personal fantasy advisor to the Dos Equis guy, an on-air personality for the Fantasy Sports Network (FNTSY) RotoExperts and SportsGrid. You may email Mike at mike@fantasysportsnetwork.com or follow him on Twitter @MikeCardano.