For Four Measly Bucks, You Can Own A Piece Of The Collapsed Metrodome Roof

What a steal, right? Although there is one caveat: you first have to take a tour of the decrepit, sterile and unsightly home of the Minnesota Vikings, the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome. And you have to be one of the first 2,000 rubes to do so. But if you are one of those lucky first 2,000, not only will you have experienced a tour what you will one day bore your grandchildren with the details, you will also have a swath of Teflon-coated fiberglass layered with proprietary acoustical fabric to serve as an everlasting memento.

The purpose of the tour is also to give people with no lives the opportunity to get a first-hand look at the progress that is being made in replacing the roof, which as you recall, collapsed December 12th in spectacular, avalanche-like fashion.

The dome is open to walk-up visitors April through November, on Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays at 11 a.m. The tours depart from Gate F and the cost is $4 per person. After the roof is replaced, the tours won’t be offered on days when the stadium hosts daytime events.

So, book for flights now to the Twin Cities now, people not fortunate enough to live in the Land of 10,000 Lakes: a worthless, nasty piece of fabric is yours for the taking! Only 2,000 remaining, maybe less! Act now!