Thursday, September 30, 2010

Well, it hasn't been a secret--for six months or so (and, really, longer), the rumors have been out there. Obviously BHO knew about it too. Rahm has never kept it a secret--even when he was a congressman. This is the job he really wanted. And I have to admit, I think he'll be a pretty damned good big city mayor.

Other chiefs of staff have gone on to "bigger" things--Dick Cheney, James Baker, Gen, Haig, Rumsfeld, Donald Regan...

Two years is about the norm, really. It's just about as much as anyone in their right mind can take. And he's not exactly well-loved, even around the white house. Yeah, it does make it look like people are abandoning ship...what are you going to do? The ship is definitely taking on water, but it's fundamentally sound. And it's probably time to re-energize the place with fresh meat.---o0o---

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

What Would Jesus Eat? We don't really know what Jesus ate, but there is, naturally, a panel of wildly divergent experts on the Internet who will tell you they know. In fact, someone wrote a book, and put out a "What Would Jesus Eat? diet."

What do we know about what Jesus ate? Not much at all. The Bible does not specifically detail whether he ate on the day of the Sermon On The Mount or not; we know he fed a large crowd that day with a few loaves of barley bread and two fish.

"...he directed the people to sit down on the grass. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. Then he gave them to the disciples, and the disciples gave them to the people."

The Feeding of the 5,000 (the story of the loaves and fishes) is the only miracle (besides his resurrection) that happens in all four Gospels (Matthew 14:13–21, Mark 6:31-44, Luke 9:10-17 and John 6:5-15). But we still don't know if he ate, held out for a steak, or maybe lentils, back in town.

We know He changed water into wine. We just don't know whether he drank it or not.

The Gospel of Luke says Jesus ate broiled fish and honeycomb (Luke 24:42). As far as I can tell, this is the only mention in the Bible of him actually eating. This knocks out some of the most vociferous claims of Christ's vegetarianism. But there seem to be many people who believe that Christ was a vegan or vegetarian, and many others that believe he probably ate fish, and maybe some lamb once in a while. We know he served bread and wine at the Last Supper, but we do not know whether he ate or drank any of it himself.

Both crackpots and scholars believe that Jesus ate a Mediterranean Diet version of strictly kosher Jewish food, which would include olives, olive oil, lamb and fin fish, and possibly beef (we know the kosher diet could include "fatted calf"), grains, vegetables, and fruit. But other crackpots and scholars claim he ate no meat or fish at all. People don't seem to have eaten chicken in the bible, which would rule out matzoh ball soup.

Many people claim Jesus Christ as a vegetarian. In 1999, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) launched a campaign to claim that Jesus was a vegetarian. Billboards stating "Jesus was a vegetarian. Show respect for God's creatures - follow Him" were put up around the country.

The Gospels specifically mention Jesus keeping three Passover feasts in Jerusalem. In order to keep the feast, the participants were given roasted lamb, bitter herbs, and unleavened bread to eat (Exodus 12:3-4). The entire lamb had to be eaten during the feast. If there were any leftovers, they had to be burned (Exodus 12:10). If Jesus did not eat the lamb, he may have been violating the Law and could have been accused of sin. But we just don't know....no one mentions whether he sat at the table and ate, or not.

"... observe the Passover to the LORD. 'In the second month on the fourteenth day at twilight, they shall observe it; they shall eat it with unleavened bread and bitter herbs. 'They shall leave none of it until morning, nor break a bone of it; according to all the statute of the Passover they shall observe it. 'But the man who is clean and is not on a journey, and yet neglects to observe the Passover, that person shall then be cut off from his people, for he did not present the offering of the LORD at its appointed time. That man will bear his sin." (Numbers 9:10-13)

Jesus possibly ate lamb, and definitely ate fish:

"But while they still did not believe for joy, and marveled, He said to them, 'Have you any food here?' So they gave Him a piece of a broiled fish and some honeycomb. And He took it and ate in their presence" (Luke 24:41-43).

Whether Jesus ate fish or lamb, or was a strict vegetarian, we know he believed in fishing, and helped his disciples and other fish. Vegetarian, or not, he was at the least, an enabler:

"So Jesus said to them, "Children, you do not have any fish, do you?" They answered Him, "No." And He said to them, "Cast the net on the right-hand side of the boat and you will find a catch." So they cast, and then they were not able to haul it in because of the great number of fish. ... So when they got out on the land, they saw a charcoal fire already laid and fish placed on it, and bread. Jesus said to them, "Bring some of the fish which you have now caught." Simon Peter went up and drew the net to land, full of large fish, a hundred and fifty-three; and although there were so many, the net was not torn. Jesus said to them, "Come and have breakfast." None of the disciples ventured to question Him, "Who are You?" knowing that it was the Lord. Jesus came and took the bread and gave it to them, and the fish likewise." (John 21:5-6, 9-14).

Monday, September 27, 2010

"Call it irony, fate, or simply an accident: in Britain, the owner of Segway died over the weekend when he apparently drove one of the devices off a cliff near his home, The Associated Press reported."

"Jimi Heselden, who owned Segway, Inc. until his death on Sunday.In West Yorkshire, police reported that James W. Heselden, 62, who took over control of the company earlier this year, accidentally steered the Segway off a 30-foot cliff and into a river while riding on his estate, about 140 miles from London."

Friday, September 24, 2010

You may have seen this great ad (or its numerous variants) drifting around the Internet sometime over these least few years. As happens so rarely, we now know the rest of the story! Or, the rest of the hoax. Read on. . . [thanks to Jeff Clinton for the news tip]

John Silveira, who worked for Backwoods Home Magazine confected the ad in the first place: "it first appeared on page 92 of the Sept/Oct 1997 issue of BHM—and I wrote it."

Since it was published 13 years ago, it has been talked about on the Jay Leno show, and in hundreds of other media outlets. Thousands of people have written to that Post Office Box. There have been t-shirts, and there has even been a ghost hunter trying to track down the Time Traveller. To read the full story, go here, to Backwoods Home.---o0o---

Thursday, September 23, 2010

By Jack BrummetParanormal and unexplained phenomena editor[thanks to Jeff Clinton for the news tip!]

Greys would be welcome in the Roman Catholic churchaccording to an article in The Telegraph--"no matter how many tentacles", one of the Pope's astronomers said. Dr. Guy Consolmangno--the senior Vatican scientist--has no problem with mixing science and religion. Brother Consolmangno claimed that the revival of intelligent design – the theory that only God can explain gaps in the theory of evolution – was “bad theology".

Dr. Consolmango is one 12 astronomers working for the Vatican (WTF!), says The Church had been supporting and funding science for centuries. Well, maybe except Galileo, eh?

The head astronomer said he was "comfortable" with the idea of alien life and when asked if he would baptise an alien, he replied "Only if they asked." "I’d be delighted if we found life elsewhere and delighted if we found intelligent life elsewhere," he said.

“But the odds of us finding it, of it being intelligent and us being able to communicate with it - when you add them up it’s probably not a practical question. God is bigger than just humanity. God is also the god of angels.”---o0o---

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
— General George S. Patton

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."
— David Letterman

"The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found truffles in Iraq."
— Dennis Miller

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."
— Argus Hamilton

"After what they say was an exhaustive investigation, the Defense Minister of France said today that Osama bin Laden is either still in hiding in Afghanistan, he may have escaped to Pakistan, or he may be dead. Hey, France, thanks a lot. We'll take it from here. Hard to believe they were invaded twice."
— Jay Leno

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than against the Nazis?"
— Dennis Miller

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion. You just leave a lot of useless noisy baggage behind."
— Jed Babbin, former Deputy Undersecretary of Defense

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

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...and the soundboard MP3s are just fantastic. The show sounds even better on this recording that it did live. It was the greatest latter day incarnation of the Grateful Dead yet (sorry Mickey and Billy)...

Friday, September 17, 2010

After all the butt-scratching, dissembling, and aw-shucksing about her Presidential plans, Ex-Governor Sarah Palin now says, sure, "I would give it a shot." But, only if we think she's "the one."

The half-term former Governor made this pronouncement during an interview with Fox News (her sometime employer). There were, of course, a couple of contingencies:

"If the American people were to be ready for someone who is willing to shake it up, and willing to get back to time-tested truths, and help lead our country towards a more prosperous and safe future and if they happen to think I was the one, if it were best for my family and for our country, of course I would give it a shot."

As you all know, she is highly skilled at getting on TV and energizing the base, but her team's organizational skills run the gamut from pathetic to non-existent. If she IS going to make an even half-serious run, she needs to get on the ground in the primary states...just as her potential adversaries like Mitt Romney, Haley Barbour, Newt Gingrich, and others are doing. She found it difficult to study for the VP debates; it's not clear if she has the stomach for the massive operational efforts required to mount a Presidential primary campaign.---o0o---

Thursday, September 16, 2010

The GOP is spooked by the Tea Party candidates putting their expected Senate pick-up seats at risk. Christine O'Donnell, a perennial candidate, know often as the "anti-masturbation lady" has now snagged the Republican Senate nomination in Delaware. Virtually everyone, Dem and GOP, admits that she will be trounced in the general election. The party regular at least had a shot. The Republicans are so Eff'd! It will be fascinating to watch over the next couple of months, as the Republicans auto-cannibalize themselves. They're acting like the Demorats usually do!

Ex Governor Palin, won big on Tuesday. Her endorsement clearly gave several Tea Party members a boost in their campaigns. As Christine O'Donnell said "Thank you for your endorsement. Because she got behind us war-weary folks, and gave us a boost of encouragement when we needed it." No one has yet determined whether or not Sarah Palin endorses O'Donnell's anti-masturbation stance.

Palin also backed Wisconsin's Sean Duffy -- an ex-district attorney (who was in the cast of MTV's "The Real World."). He won big in the Republican primary Tuesday for a U.S. House seat. In New York, Michael Grimm beat his opponent in the Republican primary for a House seat representing Staten Island. Amazingly enough, Palin's nod has catapulted several obscure candidates into the limelight--Joe Miller in Alaska, Rand Paul in Kentucky, and Nikki Haley in South Carolina.

Alas for the Grand Ole Party, some of these wins, particularly the one in in Delaware, are being called a "GOP nightmare."

"It is not enough to be abstinent with other people, you also have to be be abstinent alone. The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery, so you can't masturbate without lust."

Christine O'Donnell has been a Republican candidate for Senate before — in 2008, she ran and lost to Smilin' Joe Biden, who stayed in the race, just in case he lost the vice presidency.

O'Donnell is probably known best for her advocacy of sexual abstinence — including the physically safe, but apparently soul-destroying act of masturbation:

"The reason that you don't tell [people] that masturbation is the answer to AIDS and all these other problems that come with sex outside of marriage is because again it is not addressing the issue. ... You're just gonna create somebody who is, I was gonna say, toying with his sexuality. Pardon the pun." - Christine O'Donnell

The Republicans loved the Tea Party when they were voting en masse for the GOP. Now? Even Dick Armey's FreedomWorks, who are in bed with the tea partiers, won't endorse her. Lean back and enjoy the show--there is nothing more satisfying than seeing Republicans turn on themselves like a rabid pack of famished cannibals as they watch their Anti-Onanist candidate (and dreams of controlling The Senate) flame out.---o0o---

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Jacob Isom is a 23 year old Amarillo resident, and skateboarder. He was skating along when he heard someone talking about torching a Quran. Jacob grabbed away the holy book and told the would-be book burner, "Dude, you have no Quran!" before hashing away.

According to Michael Cohen at allnewsweb.com, "UFO researchers have been taken by surprise by recent UFO/alien event that took place in South America."

On August 8th, a news crew was doing a live broadcast on TV in Santa Cruz, Argentina-- a "known alien hotspot," when a Grey appeared in the distance.

The video was broadcast live on Argentina's Channel Two. The Grey/EBE/alien is seen moving towards a woman being interviewed.

The crew and many viewers who recorded the broadcast say this was the same live film that streamed on TV and has not been edited or altered.

According to allnewsweb.com, "...Santa Cruz is a major UFO hot spot and this publication has reported many times on events in this area. Amazingly, last year staff at a local restaurant also saw and photographed what they thought was an alien watching them from a distance. These events suggest that a UFO base might exist somewhere in the area." ---o0o---

Sunday, September 12, 2010

This is the theatre where I learned to love movies. It was built in about 1946, roughly when this photograph was taken. The only photo I could find was not snapped to show the theatre, but the annual flooding in the waterlogged valley where I grew up.

We went there most weekends. I remember that a ticket was thirty-five cents. It was not a first run theatre, but I remember seeing I Saw What You Did And I Know Who You Are, House of Wax, lots of bad comedy, The Thing, Gorgo, tons of Godzilla, Frankenstein, Three Stooges, The Birds, Night of the Living Dead, and many more.

When I was young, the Kent Valley flooded almost every winter...until the Howard Hanson dam was build far upstream on the Green River. The dam was completed in about 1942. Its completion led to the transformation of Kent from a fertile farming area to industrial use, and it eventually became one of the largest concentrations of warehouses in the world. Historylink.org writes "the dam has changed South King County from flooded farmlands to a sea of warehouses, industrial plants, condominiums, and shopping centers."

The White River and the Green River flowed down from the mountains in the east into the valley and formed a confluence near downtown Auburn. From there, the river traveled north and was met by the Black River (an outflow from Lake Washington that no longer exists) near Tukwila, where the combined rivers become the Duwamish River which flow into Elliott Bay in southwest Seattle.

As it turns out, the earthen dam was not built for the ages and has shown signs of deterioration. Over the last few years, the Army Corps of Engineers has been frantically reinforcing the dam to prevent a breach and a King-Hell sudden flood of the valley. My mom still lives there, and the last two winters were spent in a flood watch, and with the residents all buying flood insurance against the deluge they were assured would never happen again.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

They appear to be out of cell phone range at the moment, but Pablo and Mona left me a lengthy voice mail yesterday afternoon from "somewhere near Memphis," where they had just learned that the Quran burning in Gainesville, FLA had been cancelled. They had clearly been "celebrating" their apparent triumph.

You may remember that early in the week, Pablo loaded up a pickup with 2,000 Bibles, and fifty American flags ("for kindling") and began barreling toward Florida to mount a serious, and quite possibly, dangerous confrontation.

"a counteroffensive against the crackers, ass-clowns, and pinheads who are about to torch a stack of Qurans." - Pablo Fanque (All This Is That National Affairs Editor)

Pablo and Mona

Midway through the voicemail, Mona Goldwater took the phone and told me, slurring even more than Fanque, that they were drinking at a rest stop just outside of Memphis, and giving away their large stock of Bibles and American Flags to surprised fellow travellers. "We'll sleep here overnight and get back on the road to Seattle at first light. We did it! I mean, I get that it wasn't us alone, but I don't think even that publicity-whore Terry Jones wanted to see our Quran and American flag bonfire."

Two articles from earlier in the week on the Fanque/Goldwater road trip and demonstration:

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Update from the flyover states. Yes, we're on the road to Gainesville, FLA, as we mentioned, with a cargo of 2,000 Bibles, 50 American flags, and a gallon of kerosense. As we mentioned here yesterday, we are heading to Gainesville, to the Dove World Outreach Center, where we perform a kerosene and Bourbon-fueled counter-demonstration during Dr. Terry Jones' planned "Burn a Koran Day" festivities.

We made good time. This morning we are Little Big Horn, and stopped to stretch at the battlefield where General Custer met his end. 900 miles down, and 2,000 to go to hit Gainesville!

We were stopped by the police just outside of Billings, Montana. We had a burned out tail-light. The state patrolman took an unusual interest in the bed of the pickup truck, raised the tarp, and saw the Bibles.

"What are these for?"

"We're going to give them away in Florida."

"Why would you do that," the trooper asked, "Isn't that a long way to go to hand out Bibles?"

"Officer, there isn't a law against interetstate transportation of Bibles, is there?"

"Get out of here, and get that light fixed at the next stop."

Today we hope to make it as far as Paducah, Kentucky. Bourbon Country.

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

I don't know, maybe it doesn't make much sense, but I plan to drive this afternoon to Florida in a pickup with a case of bourbon, a jar of criss-cross methamphetamines, 2,000 Bibles, 50 American flags, a gallon of kerosene, and as many of you as I can convince to go with me. As Preacher Jones ignites his Qurans, I will light up 2,000 Bibles on a bed of 50 kerosene-soaked American Flags. I would prefer not to. I never feel like burning things accomplishes much--draft cards, police cars, bras, flags, effigies. . .all it ever seems to really accomplish is to incite people. Granted, people sometimes need to be incited, but not now, not this time, or about this "cause."

As Woody Allen once said apropos the First Amendment, "I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats."

My message to The Rev. and his possibly millions of short-term and fair-weather friends is: if you don't torch yours, I won't ignite mine. If you do burn the Qurans, I have no compunction about lighting up the Bibles and flags. If you go through with it, I feel like this counterstrike, or ballast may at least let our brothers and sisters know that we too felt this was the misguided action of a misanthropic few. Maybe this makes no sense at all, but I hope it may be some kind of balm for the outrage Dr. Jones and the laughably named Dove World Outreach Center provoke.

Sorry Muslims...part of this democracy thing is allowing even deranged hatemongers to practice free speech; the first amendment is inviolable, but please don't confuse the Quran Burners and Tea Baggers (it would be interesting to see a Venn Diagram of the overlaps of these two groups) with real Americans.---o0o---

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