HOLY SHIT. THEY ARE DOING IT. THEY ARE DOING IT! THEY ARE FINALLY MOTIVATING THE WRESTLER PEOPLE.

kingarthurDo you see this, middle America? Do you see this you bible-beating, Wal-Mart shoppers? We're meeting you halfway! Now get out there on your disability scooters and in your suped up "racing" cars and on your chromed-out dubs and vote for one of us!

kingarthurSeriously, put down the beer, the crack rock, and the crystal meth, put some clothes on your irresponsible-sized litters of children, step over the dog and out the font door of your trailer and come vote! Its what Jesus and Vince MacMahon want you to do!

kingarthurYou can take some time off from that minimum wage job to vote for us! You'll only be missing an hour or less! The kids can go without tonight's rations of McDonald's and Coke. You can afford to miss one night of those GED classes or those classes you're working SO HARD on towards your associate's degree. It's allright! John Cena said it was allright! Your vote ounts! It absolutely matters! Remember to listen to your Rush Limbaugh.

kingarthurI just can't properly express how filled with ...god, I don't even know..this make me.

StanleyPainI"m going to guess half the people who see these won't even fucking know who these people are.

AdramelechThat's a lot of thought you put into presidential candidates taking free publicity on the highest rated show on cable.

CornOnTheCabreI think it's funny to imagine some sort of right-leaning bizarro PoE website posting the candidates' appearances on The Daily Show and The Colbert Report and saying the exact opposite posts that are being made right now.

kingarthurWell, keep in mind my feelings on this stem largely from a deep, deep, deep personal hatred of the South.

fermunI don't know what I am going to do when McCain and the McCainiacs run wild over me.

badideasinactionIt strikes fear into my heart when I think that out there, someone's vote may actually be decided this way.

Part of me also wonders if they were all so wooden as to avoid pulling a "Dean Scream" moment, or whether they really have no idea what this strange assembly of letters on the cue-cards mean.

StophelesI want to see Obama riffing on a Japan-era Cactus Jack promo:

"When I was a junior Senator and needed help, I asked Hillary Clinton. When I had problems on committee, I asked Hillary Clinton. But when it comes time for me to take my place in the history of Presidential politics, I come to Pennsylvania.

And I don't ask Hillary Clinton a damned thing.

I TELL HER!!!"

DeadfetusI like where you are going with this, but how about just "bang bang, bang bang?"

OgreMkIVI am very disappointed that they did not include Nader. Or Ron Paul.

XenocideI want Ron Paul to go on there and totally do it up Paul Bearer style.

"OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH MISTER GOVERNMENT. SOON YOU WILL PERISH, AS I DEREGULATE EEEEEEEEEVEEEEEERRRRRYYYYYTHIIIIIIIIIIING."

DerangedGoblinWhen McCain was going ad there was a slight pause after his "What gonna do," my mind so shamefully thought he was going to say "with all dat ass, all dat ass up in dem jeans."
This loses a star because he didn't...

Hooper_XGoddamnit, you guys. I watch wrestling and NASCAR and I thought this was a hilarious shameless travesty of a vote grab.

What I *really* want to know is which one of them signed on the dotted line first. You know all it took was McCain saying "shit, why not? I saw Frank Gotch fight George Hackenschmidt when I was a kid!" and then the other two have to scramble to crank something out.