Tuesday, November 29, 2005

yesterday was the day...last saturday, i was really upset but God embraced me last sunday so umuwi ako sa province na masaya..nauna nako umuwi last sunday afternoon..monday, just woke up early konting linis and i did the christmas tree..yepee! pasko na sa amin..si tatay at si nanay ang nagluto ng ulam, adobong baboy, inihaw na tilapya at hito at of course ang aming famous na pinakbet! ( sana nabusog sila..)actually, ok na kila nay na walang pamanhikan..i remember one of my sister got married without it..but of course ako kasi i would like to give respect to both of our parents that's why i wanted it.at first we were both nervous sa di ko malamang kadahilanan but it went ok naman..wala namang naging problema.

although had to admit, i expected some people that i believe were close to us, to be there but for some reasons hindi nakasama..sumama ang loob ko but it's ok..ganun talaga..will just try to understand them.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

i wanted to write badly...no..i want to cry..that's exactly how i feel right now..i am a bit hesitant of writing it here..pero hello!!! blog ko to..at i can write what i want to write..i just feel so sad..this has been my feelings since tuesday...mga rason? di ko na alam which is which...i guess i'm tired..tired of being strong for everyone..or maybe feeling ko lang to.i know naman na i am not that strong..pero bakit ganun? di ko maipakita sa kanila kung ano talaga ang nasa loob ko..kung ano naiisip ko..kung ano nararamdaman ko panungkol sa kanila..sabi ni carmel..maybe God is stretching my faith...i guess so..sana lang di sumama ng todo ang loob ko.now..i am beginning to recognize the people that really cares for us..at konti man sila..i thank God for them.. and going through this stage..i am more thankful that i have Rudolf..i have his hand to hold..i have his shoulder to cry on..i have him to make me smile.. and I thank Him also for the kids at maricaban..therapy na rin sila sa akin..kahit matitigas ang mga ulo..kanina when we started singing.medyo nabawasan yung bigat ng loob ko..at nakuha nila talaga ang atensiyon ko.I just love looking at them singing praises to the Lord..at kung meron mang pinakamahalaga sa akin ngayon..yun eh yung mabilan sila lahat ng gifts this christmas and at least put a smile on thier cute faces..i don't know how we will be able to buy them all a gift for they are at least 60 kids.God will provide.FAITHan officemate of mine had promised 20 toys for boys and girls..counts a lot.bakit ganun? di ko pa rin maisulat yung gusto ko talaga isulat?

Saturday, November 19, 2005

yeah..i am updating this blog of mine from cabanatuan..been here since wednesday..it was an emergency leave..my mom is sick and i have to go home..thank God she's fine now.She just needs close supervision to keep her blood sugar and blood pressure low. I never knew it could be as serious as this until i was able to talk to her doctor which happens to be my classmate wayback elementary. Her blood sugar was so high it could have caused her blindness and her blood pressure could have caused her a stroke..which i taught she had, kaya talaga namang ninerbyos ako at sumugod ako umuwi..i cried and i was so afraid of the thought that we're gonna lose her na..umiral na naman pag ka praning ko!Praise God! I know she'll be fine..a lot of prayer had been said for her and God surely listens...on wedding preps...i was able to visit "Sa lumang bahay" parang ocular na din..and discussed some things with belle-the owner who also manages the place..she's so accomodating..the place is good like what i've said before and finally my father agreed na..so hopefully after the pamanhikan on the 28th..mag full blast na kami sa preparations.prescy called me last week- she will sponsor my gown talaga!.. ang bait ni Lord..and she said yes na rin as one of my secondary sponsors..kailangan na namin pumayat!we were able to talk to Pastor Gani na rin, he'll officiate our wedding and has given us lots of encouraging words and tips..counselling with him will start soon na rin..so maybe we will be very busy on the next few months.ano pa ba nagawa namin? hmnnn..we went to divisoria na rin pala...we scouted some materials for our invitations..maybe we could go back before the end of this month..super hirap na pumunta dun ngayon kasi dami na tao..gotta go now..nakakalimutan ko may pasyente pala ko..hehe!miss ko na mahal ko...:(