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I recently went to a "fleyshik potluck" — that is, people were asked to bring things that could be eaten with a meat meal. I'm used to vegetarian/dairy potlucks, and I was concerned from the beginning whether this meal would allow me to adhere to my own level of kashrut observance. When I got there, I saw that one of the guests had brought a kugel that was clearly dairy. The hosts put it out on the buffet along with the rest of the food. The whole thing made me really uncomfortable, but I also understand that the host was in a difficult situation. What should they have done? What should I have done?

There are so many potlucks in Philadelphia, and I'm worried about gaining weight as a result. What are some strategies for eating at potluck meals without outgrowing all my Shabbat clothes?

Signed,
Potluck Pounds

Dear Pounds,

The best strategy for eating at a potluck is the same as at any other meal: Eat until you're satisfied, but not stuffed. Moderation is more difficult when you're faced with six different kinds of pasta and three different trays of brownies. Just remember, even though all these foods are in front of you, you don'...

I like to make substitutions so that my baking is less fattening, but is it "dishonest" to bring a healthy version of a popular dish to a potluck? I've done yogurt brownies, pie with Splenda, cakes with applesauce instead of butter, etc. Will people be disappointed to bite into something and realize it's not "the real thing"?

Signed,
Substituting Splenda

Dear Substituting,

I happen to think that potlucks are the best possible excuse to try out the most fattening, decadent dish that you'd never make for yourself at home because at the most,...

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