Heat Crunch Time Highlights!

LOL.

25-years ago, Len Bias did this.

Get me this out-of-bounds play!

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Some thoughts as I watch the NBA playoffs on this beautiful Saturday afternoon in southern Ohio . . .

Joakim Noah is a loon. His foul on Paul Pierce with 2.6 seconds left in regulation was pure stupidity.

Derrick Rose is good. Really good.

If I see another shot of Vinny Del Negro’s dad on the end of the bench I’m going to vomit. OK, so he moved down to the bench because he’s nervous. We get it. Let it go.

Boston has to have the most obnoxious fans on the planet. Plus, those accents grate on you like sandpaper rubbing on an open wound.

In basketball, at what point did tall become long?

Stephon Marbury couldn’t guard me, and he’s trying to guard Derrick Rose. Rose is at 35 points and counting as I write this.

I hate to say it, but LeBron & Company’s shtick is getting old. Enough already with the preening, dancing, and posing. You haven’t won anything yet fellas.

At what point did a fast break become a run-out?

Sorry, but I’m not sold on Doc Rivers. He seems like a nice enough guy but he was basically handed a title last year with the trades for Garnett and Allen, am I right?

Men over 21 should never wear another man’s jersey. Seeing a 55-year old man in a Rajon Rondo jersey is, well, sad.

I know I’m old school, but man I hate those headbands, especially when they’re worn way back on the top of the head. Paul Pierce looks like an idiot.

Every time I see Joe Smith playing it reminds me of a Maryland Camp story. When Joe was at Maryland Walt Williams was the guest speaker and I was supposed to go out and see if he was here yet. I found him in his car, listening to music, with a 40 of Schlitz Malt Liquor between his legs. This was at 10:00 in the morning. Good times.

The introductions at pro games are getting completely out of control. Shrieking announcers, fireworks, flashing lights, blah-blah-blah. The only thing missing is a human sacrifice.

Jeff Van Gundy just mentioned that Dirk Nowitzki listens to David Hasselhoff on his iPod. And we wonder why the guy can’t win a championship.

You know that old nature video of the lizard running across the water? Dirk Nowitzki reminds me of that lizard.

Uh-oh, they just said Mo Williams listens to Phil Collins. The Cavs may be in trouble.

Anderson Varejao reminds me of Sideshow Bob from the Simpsons, only less athletic.

Boston just lost. At home. To Chicago.

I just watched as LeBron James was just getting instructions from an assistant coach. He reached up, grabbed a piece of lint from the guy’s jacket, and flicked it away. I love LeBron James.