Michelle Obama and Oprah Winfrey, moms of all moms, spent part of the United State of Women Summit in a Q&A session, discussing topics such as self-worth, Obama’s plans post-first-lady and, of course, how to deal with your fucking haters.

Per WWD, FLOTUS’s trick boils down to: never read your mentions, which is policy I can believe in!:

“I like me. I’ve liked me for a very long time,” Obama said. “I learned early on how to get the haters out of my life. You have to surround yourself with people who uplift you. The best revenge is success and good work. That tends to shut ’em up.”

More importantly, though, WWD reports that one of Winfrey’s interview questions was about how men can help out women in the world. Equally sanguine, measured, and powerfully succinct, Obama simply responded:

“Be better,” she said to rapturous applause. “Just be better fathers. I’ve never experienced abuse at the hands of a man in my life, and that’s a sad rarity. Just be better. I could go on, but I’m not.”

Better than anyone, Michelle Obama understands the major keys. Here’s the full story, and watch the entire interview above.