I have never been a big fan of the Old Testament and it was because of how women were perceived and mistreated in the writings. I also never liked what I thought was Noah’s total over reaction to being found in a drunken stupor by his son. Genesis 9 v: 20-27.

It was years later that my own father very simply explained that particular passage. He says it was about the youngest son making fun of and showing off Noah’s indiscretion and not being respectful enough to keep and fix the father’s nakedness by himself.

hmmmm

My thoughts have run on that passage often these last few months as I watched my father and father in law slowly become overcome with this aging process.

My daily interaction with my father- in-law especially have made me pray often for patience and grace. Because at times it is hard to remember that he is an adult and not the child that he is acting like. And like Noah’s son I find it hard not to talk about his little mishaps as some of them are indeed very funny and would make a good story. Most days I hold my tongue.

it is strange seeing these once strong men who as a child they were our pillar of strength who now are looking for you to take care of everything.

Some days I feel angry and it is baffling to me as to why but I have slowly come to realise that the anger is masking the frustration and fear.

Frustration because he is an adults and we shouldn’t have to remind him to bathe, eat and take their pills. He should be able to do that himself. But he can’t.

Fear … fear because the days are numbered and I’m afraid of the day when I will not have to take care of him my father in law because he will be gone. Fear also that I am making a mess of it all.

Sigh this growing old thing is hard …. for the person getting old and the ones who are watching the age take over.

(wow this was long and winded and a kinds jumbled but just felt to ramble even if parts are not really coherent.)