Compulsive hoarding is a mental disorder that is just beginning to be understood. As a hoarder, I have acquired things over the years with a specific purpose in mind at the time of the acquisition, used some of those items for their intended purposes, forgotten the goal for different objects, but now that I find that they have outlived their purpose in my life I am struggling to rid myself of those same things.

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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Innocents Lost

Warning: This post's content is of a disturbing and graphic nature. I advise you to stop reading now, if you are a person who is profoundly affected by bad and sad news.

I've been in a bit of a funk lately. If you read my blog, you probably caught that with my last post about the inlaws. But that was only the beginning, and now it seems so trivial.

Every other day this last week, there's been a report of another child dying or being horribly maimed at the hands of their parents or another adult that they should have been able to trust. Some have been recent cases. Some happened months or years ago but are in the news again.

Little Paris Talley, who I heard about for the first time this week, because the woman who gave birth to her (I refuse to call her a mother. A mother could have never done something so heinous) was finally sentenced to life in prison after her third trial . Baby Paris was 28 days old when she was microwaved to death to get even with her father.

The man and his wife who killed his 9 year old daughter, Genesis Simms, several years ago and buried her body in the crawl space of the home they rented. Her body was just discovered in the last several months.

Little Isa Romero, age 2, who died over the weekend of blunt force trauma to the abdomen. Her mother's boyfriend was arrested. And while I in no way condone shaking a baby, I can understand how someone can get to that level of frustration. But how does someone get to the level of frustration that they punch a 2 year old in the gut?

Then there's the case of 20 month old Alexis Salaz. The crime she committed that warranted permanent brain damage? She knocked over her aunt's drink. So the aunt bound her wrists and ankles and then taped her eyes and mouth shut. She then put her in the shower, sprayed the little girl in the face with water. The 19 year old, who gave birth to her, walked in, saw what was happening, walked out and went to bed. The 50 year old aunt then left her in the shower with the water running and went to bed. The 7 year old little boy who found her and called 911 will be haunted for the rest of his life. He will wonder why he hadn't walked in sooner. He will forever wonder what he could have done differently to save her. Unfortunately, little Alexis won't even be able to wonder. She is in a permanent vegatative state with no hope of recovery.

Her 22 year old father? Joseph Saunders didn't even know she existed until he saw the news story and realized he might be her father. He requested a DNA test to see, if he was the father. The tests came back proving he was, and now he and his new wife are in the process of petitioning the court to take care of her. To take her home and love her. To care for her medical needs. To give her something that she never received before even, if she will never be aware that he's there.

Last week, Shannon Paolini, a 27 year old mother, called 911. She and her boyfriend could be heard arguing in the background. The sheriff's department showed up just in time to see her running out of the house. Her boyfriend came after her, firing his gun as he chased her into the street. He hit her 5 times, went back in the house, killed their 2 year old son, Gavin, and then killed himself. Shannon somehow survived the attack, that left 9 entry and exit wounds, but I don't think anyone could possibly survive something so horrific emotionally.

Yesterday, a woman killed her 6 year old daughter and 9 year old son. They're names have not yet been released, but it was an apparent murder/suicide gone wrong. After she killed her precious children, she called the police to let them know she was going to kill herself, too, but she just never got around to it.

And of course little Caylee Anthony, who was just shy of her 3rd birthday when she was killed, is in the news again, as the woman who gave birth to her goes on trial for her murder. You all probably already know the details of her death that have been released to the public so far. That there were traces of chloroform found in the trunk of the car where her body had been at one time, and that she may have been drugged, so the woman who bore her could go out and party. Seems as though the chloroform may have been used as a babysitting tool, and this time poor little Caylee was overdosed. It just never seems to stop.

And these babies need to be remembered. In my opinion, the people that committed these horrible acts against them should be forgotten. That's why I never mentioned any of their names in this post. They don't deserve to be recognized. They're not the victims. These poor, precious babies are.

And I'm not exactly sure why the news is so full of these stories any more. Is it linked to the economy? Are financial strains causing the stess to be too much for people, and they snap? Is it just that the media jumps on stories like these in the attempt to be the first to spread the bad news, because bad news sells, and things like this have always happened? Is it that Armagedon is fast approaching, and Evil has taken such a tremendous hold in the world?

I'm not sure what the cause nor the solution is. I just know my heart aches for the betrayal these little ones must have felt. For the suffering they endured. My heart aches for the survivors. For the families who lost these precious little beings, whose lives will never, ever be the same.

Praying is all I can do right now, and pray I will. I will forever carry them in my heart.

I'm totally with you on this. I didn't know about all these kids, but some of them I've read about it and it breaks my heart too. I can't wrap my mind around it. I don't know either if it's the economy or like you said, armagedon. It's horrible is what it is and I will never understand it. Evil is all around us it seems. I'll be praying with you.

I hate the news. I try my best not to watch it but of course, I can't live blind my entire life.

I tell myself the reason these kinds of stories are in the news so often is because they are news worthy. Meaning, the day when a parent horribly murdering their own child is so "everyday" and expected that it's not even worth reporting, that's the day we have to fear.

It's so hard to understand the evil that exists in this world. And the innocent that have to pay their price.

Devastating! and Ihere I sit , bawling for the losses and wondering why I could not have kids of my own and why the adoption system continues to leave me hanging .Sick b*st*rds every one!If only I could have protected even one of those precious little lives , screw that! all of them !

Who's Who and What's What in Confession's Closet

**The Hubster is my wonderful husband, but that was probably pretty evident. We recently celebrated our 30th anniversary.**Bugster is our oldest daughter, 29, who got married Spring 2010.**Bubster is Bugster's 28 year old husband.

**Baby Bug is is our first grandchild. Bugster and Bubster's beautiful little girl.**Frank is Bubster's 20 year old brother.Bugster and Bubster raised him the first 6 years of their married life, starting at age 14, due to a lack of parental responsibility.**Calamity is, for lack of a better description, Bugster and Frank's mother. To get a better idea of Calamity and how the kids ended up with guardianship of Frank, click here.

**Hopper is our middle daughter, 25, who has severe developmental delays due to a chromosome rearrangement.**Scooter is our youngest daughter, 22, who also has severe developmental delays due to the same genetic condition as Hopper. To read a little about the genetics, click here.

About Me

I'm a woman in the midst of self-discovery. I realized recently I'm a hoarder, and I'm wanting to change that. In order to do so, I need to deal with things I've not dealt with in the past. Struggles we've had. Dreams that were lost. And such an immense love for my family that I tend to hold onto everything that reminds me of them. I'm learning to let go and let the memories be enough.