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This trip report involves a lot of this some of this and a lot of this

I took this trip to see Jimmy Buffet at MGM. I went to his concert last year but sat at the very top. This year I got a floor ticket and was super excited to sit in the sea of parrot heads.

Included along with me this trip was my best friend Collin and his brother Darren. Collin and I were flying out of your home town in South Dakota, and darren would meet us in Vegas as he lives in a different city. Well Friday started off at 3:30 am as we needed to be at the airport at 4:00 am. Fly out to Minneapolis at 5:00 and were in the Minneapolis airport at 6:00am. We had a two hour lay over, hmm what to do. BLOODY MARY'S!! Hit the in the delta wing. Order Bloody's and breakfast. Went down like ice tea on a hot summer day. Another please. Second one just as easy and probably faster. I remember Collin saying to me "your on a mission". Yes why yes I am. Still have some more time so we walk down to another bar and I order a vodka red bull, Collin gets a tall dark beer of some kind. Have two there and now I'm feeling no pain.

Now we go to get on the plain and realize that our seats Weren't next to each other for some reason. Even though we had paid for specific seat. Sucked but wasn't going to risk arguing with someone after four mixed drinks. Of course I got to sit next to some guy with zero personality and Collin got to sit next to some hot chick. So I had to pass the time by drinking some vodka sprites.

Get to Vegas get off the plain walk into the airport see Collin. And in a very loud drunk voice. Say "round up the virgins, daddy's home". Collin and about 10 other people burst out laughing. Grab bags and head outside to get a sedan and off we are to the Monte Carlo.

Head to the VIP room to check inn. It was fast as can be. (VIP check in is really nice, there was a huge line outside in the main lobby. I'm sure I would of had a 30 minute plus wait.).

My first thing after I check in is to head to Margaritaville and this trip would be no different. Had the volcano nachos, fajitas, perfect margarita and a drink in a big blender called Its 5oclock somewhere. Full as shit and too drunk to care we head over to play some roulette at the casino there. Dropped $500 pretty damn fast. Only hit a couple of my numbers. With only five bucks on them.
I always play the same numbers 3,4,5,6,8,10,11,35 and 23. 23 I load up on. This trip though 23 hated me. It hid from me all weekend. Teased the shit out of me. Made me its bitch and laughed in my face.

I'll be honest I don't remember exactly were we went from there or how we got back to the monte but that's where we eventually ended up. I went slutting around. That's what I call playing random slots. Ended up at the hangover slot outside of the high limit lounge. Collin shows up with a bucket of beers and we play hangover as I scream obscenities at the machine. I had the absolute worst bonus rounds I remember. I don't get when you bet $6 a pull hit a bonus and win a measly $9. Well that makes me shout dirty things at the slot. Apparently the older lady on the bank of machines behind me didn't care for it and asked me to keep it down. I'm sorry ma'am, but my machines being a f@#*!%g c*^t I replied. I don't think she found the same humor in it as I did.

I slutted around for a while and played some roulette with no success. The first day was definitely not going to be a winner unless something changed pretty fast. Darren ended up showing up at the casino and got him settled into the room. Now Darren and I are the two degenerate gamblers of the group. We slutted around for a while and the went to go get ready to head to craft steak for supper.

Head over to MGM feeling like a million dollars. Run into three girls on the way and start chatting it up. One of the girls took the pleasure of matching us up by numbers. Girl 1 with guy 1. 2 with 2 and 3 with 3. I was number three and the hot blonde of the group was also 3. Sweet. We talk for a bit and found out that these three were definitely in Vegas to let loose and do things that they wouldn't normally at home. Because when they found out we had three beds in our hotel room the instantly wanted to head there. Girl 1 kept on saying one bed for each couple. Now, I. Happily married and had no intentions of cheating on my wife taking care of my kids at home. So I had to be the party pooper and ditch the girls. Darren is the only single guy of the three and was really bummed. He kept saying that he would never of told anyone, and as much as I wish I could have a different outcome to that little story. Im glad now that I don't.

Craftsteak. I ordered the wague 10oz fillet. Buffalo mozzarella salad and potatoes gratin had a side car to drink. I was not overly impressed with the service at Craftsteak. In fact I thought it sucked. Also the potatoes gratin were very bland. So for the sides and service I would give them a D at best. But the steak was a different story. It was absolutely the greatest steak I have ever eaten. Was done perfectly medium. And tasted like god himself was in the kitchen preparing it. It should be that good for $115 for a 10 oz. steak. Shifter I know you have said that the Japanese Kobe beef is even better, so if mine was this good I can't imagine what that taste like. Maybe next time.

Headed back to the monte after dinner I sat down at a roulette wheel and Darren went to the room to Ralph up his lobster bisque that wasn't sitting well with him Collin went to bed.

I was playing some people from Australia that were there for ten days. I told them that ten days of how I did Vegas would probably kill me, and after ordering about 8 vodka red bulls I think they believed me. At around 4am I decided to call it a night and asked the pit boss what he had me down for and he said about 150 a spin. It was probably closer to 100-125 but I was tipping quite well so I'm sure that helped. I was also very drunk but I don't become a jerk or annoying, but a fun drunk so I'm sure that helped also.

So for the first day, I drank a ton ate good food. I went to bed down $2000 for the day.

I had every intention of trying to meet up with the members at the Cosmo. But completely forgot about it Sorry to disappoint anyone. As I'm sure I didn't.

Saturday morning my internal time clock woke me up at 7 am. I knew that I couldn't sleep with all that excitement to be had down in the casino. I jumped in the shower, trying to be quiet so not to wake up the other two. But I must have because I hear Darren say " what the hell are you doing. You just went to bed at 4:30 this morning. Do you ever sleep." My reply was a simple "nope, call me when you guys get up."

I head the roulette wheels closest to ignite lounge and sit down, the dealer said she remembered me from last year. Not sure if that was good or bad. Since I was already down $2000 I told myself that I was going to take it easy and only play $1 chips. I bought in with $300 and got my stacks. The cocktail waitress came by so I ordered a Bloody Mary took me all of about three minutes to drink my breakfast then I started in on the vodka red bulls. Only playing singles was my biggest mistake of this trip. Because, besides 23 I hit every other number multiple times. At one point on the board I remember having six of my numbers in a row had hit. Then it went cold for a while with a few numbers hitting few and far between. I left the table up 1200. With a yellow and a purple chip. I no winning any amount of money is a good thing. But if i would of bought in for more and played nickles like i normally do, and could have done. Then that 1200 win could have been much much larger. On my way to go cash in I ran into Collin and Darren. The two sleepy heads had finally made it out of bed.

We desired that we would go walk the strip casino hop and the grab lunch. The thing is, we can't get out of a casino without finding something we just have to throw money into. So an easy task like walking outside becomes an hour long ordeal. In fact, we made it just about to the door then we spotted it. The slot named You Bet Your Ass. Now any slot named you by your ass is worth playing. The whole time we were playing we couldn't help but yelling "you bet your ass, I'm wanna win or you bet your ass its my spin. In the loudest backwoods country voice we could make. We had a blast playing that game. Mainly because we were yelling you bet your ass.

Finally made it outside the monte and walked down to the Cosmo. We slutted around in Cosmo four about an hour. Playing a whole bunch of different slots. Drank bunch of vodka red bulls. I remember hitting a bonus on a monopoly slot that paid $300, but gave all or most of it back to other machines. When we left Cosmo I had about the same I walked in with. So cheap entertainment I figure.

Walked over to Planet Hollywood and played rapid roulette like a moron. I'd pop in a hundred and then push on the screen as fast as I could until I had bet all my money. First time nothing. Do it Agian. Nope. Agian nope. Just one more, not gonna happen. This time. Nope. I lost $700 at the rapid roulette wheel. Well I got a Corona, so I didn't completely waste the $700. At least I got something to show from it.

We were going to grab a bite to eat, but Collin said he didn't feel like eating yet. So off to Paris. We walked threw Paris, and something came over me. I'm guessing it was the booze, because I couldn't stop saying wee wee. I had to say it to everyone. I also got the bright idea to try and photo bomb people. There are a lot of people taking pictures in and outside of Paris. What I noticed ass I was acting like a 12 year old. Is that people that spoke English would usually laugh about being photo bombed. People that didn't speak English if they caught me would look at me like I was a complete f#cking moron. Which I was. So they had every right give me that look.

Planned on going to the Buffet pre party at the flamingo. But Collin ended up feeling sick and thought it would be best to head back to the Monte. I was going to go to the pre party by myself but decided I would be a nice friend and head back with them. Collin really wasn't feeling well and headed up to the room. Where he would remain for the rest of the day and night.

Darren and I thought that we should hit the pool for a while but when we went to go check it out there were probably 10 people out there and it seemed like there was a lot of shade covering the pool area. So Darren said he was going to go take a nap. And I went of to gamble. I know that I played slots and roulette but I can't remember any specifics about playing. I also ate at noodle company and remember it was very good. I had fried wontons. Pot stickers, and general Tsos chicken. I must of drank three pitchers of water with lunch which was very much needed to try and hydrate and sober up some before jimmy buffet later that night.

I headed over to MGM around 6:00 pm and started to see the parrot heads. Now I was getting excited for the concert. I got laid by some lady that saw I had a buffet shirt on. I guess she thought I needed some pink flowers around my neck.
I sat down at a blackjack table and played $50 blackjack for a while with some parrot heads from Texas. I remember one of the dealers that came was a real ass. I had gotten a blackjack and and as I was getting paid out I simply asked if this was a 3/2 table or a 6/5 table. I didn't look at the chips and figure it out. As a probably should have. But, simply asked the question. I thought it was a simple fair question. But he got pissed when I asked and told me to look at my chips and figure it out. I said I'm not very good at math. He replied, Obviously. So I told him "yep. I'm so bad at math I can't figure out how much to tip you so I guess I just won't. ". Left the table at the dealer was being a dick I thought.

Went to the casino area right before you walk to the arena. By Craftsteak. Had a little time to kill before the concert. Sat down next to a lady at the sex and the city machines. She was probably in here fifties. chatted for a while found out she was solo at the concert also. She let me know that she was a recently furlowed government employee who's boyfriend just dumped here and she was ready to party and let loose and do some crazy stuff. I told her that I was down for partying but didn't know if I could get to crazy or my wife might kill me. " "oh great now you tell me your married, at least I didn't embarrass myself to bad" she said.

Headed into the concert. This concert was even better than last years. So much fun. The people around me were great. The best concert I have been to hands down.

After the concert I was pretty drunk so I made my way back over to monte. Played there for a bit I thin I did ok because when I went to bed around 2:00 am. I was only down $500 for the day. So far only down $2500 for two days. Not to bad.

Oh geez, thanks for the heads up. I was really tired last night when I wrote this up and also using an iPad. Sorry for the grammar and spelling mistakes.

I was going to try and finish writing the rest tonight, but there doesn't seem to be much interest in this report. If anyone wants me to finish let me know. Id rather read reports than write them anyways.
So no hard feelings on my part either way.

Apparently the older lady on the bank of machines behind me didn't care for it and asked me to keep it down. I'm sorry ma'am, but my machines being a f@#*!%g c*^t I replied. I don't think she found the same humor in it as I did.

Sunday I had a tee time at Wynn at 9:15 am. Got up around 7:00 am and headed down to jump in a cab. Now I can't remember if I went to the sportsbook before I went to the Wynn or after. I'm thinking it was after, but at some time I placed a bet $200 on the colts money line and $100 on the over of the colts broncos game.

Ones I got to Wynn I was a little early for checking in to golf, so I hit the casino. I bought into roulette for $600 and played nickels for about 40 minutes. The pit boss asked if I wanted a players card. Heck yes, I've read on hear we're some of you have gotten really good comps with just a little play. So sign me up. I hit a few numbers here and there, but couldn't hit 23. I ultimately lost my buy in. I never asked but I'm guessing my average spin was around $100 so hopefully I was rated ok.

After roulette I walked threw the slots and came across a $5 pinball slot. Popped $100 in and hit max bet. First spin; bar, blank, pinball! Sweet first pull and I'm in the bonus. I've never played pinball before but know some of you love it. I ended up with five balls. At first I thought that it was like top dollar were you had to decide if you wanted to keep the win on each ball. Nope you get to add me all up. Ended up winning 200 credits. Cash out at $1000.
Walked over to a davinci diamonds $1 machine. Popped in $200 played for about 10 minutes slowly dwindling down to nothing. I was betting $20 per spin and on the last spin I ended up getting five Mona Lisa's. hot fucking digity dog. NW that's a good way to start the day.

It was now time to go play some golf. The Wynn golf course is very nice. Ended up playing with a guy from Tokyo and two brothers from Canada. The caddie was really nice and new his stuff. Believe his name was Kipp.
I played like shit. Couldn't believe how bad I was hitting the ball. It's funny you pay $500 for a round of golf and you have your worst round of the year. I finally had my first drink of the day after the ninth hole.

After golf I played a spider man slot were the chair would wove around. It would have been a lot better if I had been three sheets to the wind in that chair. I ended up getting a free spin bonus and cashed out $300 up.
I don't know if any offers will come my way from Wynn, but I hope they do. I really like the casino there.

Cabbed it back to Monty headed up to the room. Walk in and couldn't believe my eyes. The room was a complete pit. There was ice everywhere all over the floor. Garbage everywhere and a bottle of vodka 3/4 of the way gone. Collin and Darren thought that it would be a really good idea to buy a bottle of ciroc and get hammered while I was golfing. I decided I needed to catch up, grabbed the bottle and slammed what was left. Now anyone that knows me, knows that it doesn't take long for alcohol to take effect. I'm a light weight. So in 15 a minutes or so I felt like the king of the world. The king of the world with a really dirty room anyways.

We decided to head downtown for the night. The cab ride down was really interesting. The cabby made us pick a number from 1-3. Then he put in a CD. He would play short bits of a song and then have us try and guess who it was. The person with the most points at the end would win the cd. I ended up with the most points and he wanted me to take the cd. I didn't want the cd so I told him I would tip him $10 if I didn't have to take the cd, or nothing if he made me take it. So needless to say I didn't have to take the cd.

Sorry for such a long break. Sometimes life gets in the way of things.

I forgot to tell you that on Saturday I went to Victoria secrets to get my wife some gifts. I'm sure most of the guys on this board have been in Victoria secrets before and so have I, but I've never been in there by myself. It took forever before I finally got someone's attention to help me. I felt like such a creep. But it was worth looking like a creep. Because my wife has liked her gifts, and that means I have liked her gifts!

Ok back to Sunday.

We got dropped off in a little side street between the D and golden nugget I believe. First stop was the D. I really liked the D's casino. The vibe there was very cool. The first place I went to was a little high limit area in the front of the casino. It had flair tables in a little elevated area. One of the tables was a midi bacc table with a $50 min bet. I bought in for $500. Started out betting the min $50 a hand. Dealer was a really nice lady. I made sure I took cae of her very well with the tips.
I soon discovered that if you bet $100 or more a hand they let you touch the cards. This was way better than jut watching the cards get turned. So no ore bets under $100. As some of you may remember I was going to try and play bacc for the first time this trip. I had told myself that when I played I was going to play conservative and slowly raise my bet. Well that lasted all of about 1 minute.
The pit boss was a very fun and nice Asian guy who kept on trying to get me to get a players card. I told him that I was never going to stay downtown so there wasn't any reason for me to get one. I know some of you love staying downtown, it's just not were I would like to spend my whole trip. But great to visit one night. I was betting any where from $100 to $500 a hand. And had gotten up to about $3000 ion chips. I hadn't seen a cocktail waitress since I sat down and had been playing for about 30 min or more. I asked the pit boss, " who's a guy got to fuck around here to get a drink." The dealer burst out laughing. And the boss raised his hand in the air motioned vigorously for a cocktail waitress and had one there in about ten seconds. I ordered 3 patron shots and three drinks for myself and two buddies watching me play. The cocktail waitress was going to start telling me that I couldn't order so much, or that's what a think she was going to say. But the pit boss interrupted here and kept on saying. It's ok, it's ok. Ok. Off she went and shortly we had our shots and redbull vodkas. Now I must say I really like bacc and can see why so many others also do. It was a blast screaming monkey at the top of my lungs. Whenever the dealer would have the last card to flip over she would make my buddies turn around and look the other way. They didn't care as we were all drunk and having the time of our lives. The best I saw was five players in a row with for of them naturals. Then shortly there after I lost four $500 hands in a row. Ended up stopping at $600 so only ended up $100, but it was one of the best times I've ever had at a table.

We next went to find the sigma derby machine upstairs. Got $40 worth of quarters. And pulled up my drunk ass to the track. It was kinda quiet when we got there. But we were about to change that. I would shove as many quarters as I possibly could into the machine between rounds and then I would max bet all of the long odds horses. For some reason you can only bet 20 quarters at a time. We would then stand up and cheer on the horses as if we had $20,000 on the little plastic horses. I ended up winning 200 and some on one race and celebrated like I just hit the progressive on wheel of fortune. But in 3 races it was all gone since I maxed out about five spots each race and never hit agian.
I really had a good time at the D and will definitely be back here.
Oh almost forgot, on the way out we stopped at the big six wheel and placed some bets. I had $50 on 5, $40 on 10,20, and both 40 spots. Spin comes and BOOM, it's a 1. Nothing oh well time to move on to the nugget.

At the nugget we decided to grab some food, so we went to a Japanese or Chinese resturant their. I don't recall what it was called but it was a smaller place with the place were the chefs cook your food and put on a show. Anyways I was paying so I decided I was going to do like max and order everything for the table. The waiter was really fun and actually told me I ordered to much and advised me to take of one of the dishes from the order. He also recommend that we have a saki bomb. We were having so much fun in there taking saki bombs and I think we out on more of a show then the chefs did. I actually appolagized to an older couple that was sitting beside us. But he said that watching us was the best time he's had all weekend. So I figure we were actually doing some good community citizenship.

The Colts vs Broncos game had already started, so I high tailed it to the sports book. Darren and Colin are not big football fans so they headed out to check out freemont street. I sat my as in a chair and prepared to cheer on the colts. The was a guy sitting close by me that was also cheering for the colts. On about my third order of coronas I asked if he wanted a beer. That was a huge mistake. Another guy sat close by us shortly there after, and thinking back I think guy number one went and got him. As the game got close to the end one of them made a comment that if the colts win would I by beers Agian. I was very excited for the game so I said sure if they win ill buy us a round. As you all know the colts won and even before I could take a breath, these two clowns were all over me, minding me about the beers. Ok let's go get some beers in say. Then guy number two asks me if he can just have the 4 dollars to get something to eat because he hadn't eaten all day. Sure whatever I said. Then the other guy asked male if I can buy him a $2 bottle of beer instead of a corona and if he could have the other $2 to play the slots. Ok fuck that I thought. I told you I would buy some fucking beers, I didn't tell you two I would give you a dollar amount. Gave the one guy $4 for some reason and bought the other a corona and got the hell out of there. I was just trying to be nice by buying some guys a few beers and ended up in a ackward situation because of these two ass clowns.

Headed back to the monte shortly after that. Cashed in my football tickets for a total of $890. Went to the roulette table and bought in for $1000. I was sitting buy a cool guy from the UK. I was heavy on the 23 and about $10 $15 on my other spots. I was hitting quite a few of my little bets wich kept me going for a while. However, I was betting the table max $100 on the 23. I know it was the table max because they made me take some of when I went over.
The guy from UK was a riot, he would cheer me on on every spin. I think he may have wanted me to hit the 23 even worse than I did. I ended up losing a total of $1500 on that table. After that I went to hit lounge and had a blood and sand and a moscowl mule. Both were very good.

I ended up walking around and played some random slots. Ended up blowing threw another $1000 before I called it a night. I also didn't want to go home completely broke so I thought I better stop there.

We were flying out early in the morning so I thought I better go get some sleep and try and sober up.

Overal this trip was a blast. Had a great time with two friends. Drank like the prohibition was going to start up agian next week. And overall did Vegas right. I think anyways.
Ended up racking up 79,000 mlife points, I believe that got me to gold. As it says 0 points to gold on the mlife site. I have know idea how much play over 3 days 79,000 points is but I'm sure some of you can help me figure that out.

Thanks for coming along my little journey, and I can't wait to do it Agian.