"Well, I'm not responsible if more people like my food than your disgusting Oatmeal." The Colonel snaps back.

"You can at least make your food less fattening! I'm not one to pick a fight but you have a pretty big gut there." The
quaker points out.

"Oh that's it! You wanna fight? I'll give you a fight!" The Colonel yells at him. He then punches him in the face.

"Well! I thought we could settle this in a peaceful way. but If you want to fight, I'll fight!" The quaker snaps back at
him.

Now who will win this fist fight?

The Commentary:

Brad: I gotta hand it to the quaker on this one on acount of two words: Clogged Arteries. The colonel
has been eating greasy fried chicken. It clogs his arteries and makes him fat and slow! Big disadvantages. Plus one more big
disadvantage to the colonel. Glasses. If the quaker punches his glasses they'll break and shards of glass will go straight
into his eyes. Meanwhile the quaker has been eating oatmeal. Making him strong. He'll easily break the colonel's old bones!
But the quaker is old to your might say. True. But he has been drinking a lot of milk with that oatmeal making his bones strong!
Listen to your parents kids and eat your oatmeal. Maybe someday you'll grow up big and strong and beat up a famous spokesperson
too!

Brent: Hi I am Brent I'll be Guest Commenting today. Anyway in a fist fight between The Quaker oatmeal
guy and the KFC Colonel the Quaker would get his ass kicked. First of all, the word Quaker means that he doesn't believe in
fights and a fist fight would be a fight so he is out. And just think The KFC is a Colonel! So he could just kick the Quaker
guy's ass! Quaker wouldn't fight back, He can't, and it would be against his beliefs. In addition the guy wears that Stupid
colonial hat. How could anybody who wears that win a fist fight? Plus he is old, you can tell by his hair. Sure, the Colonel
is old to, but he is much younger than the Quaker. The Colonel would send the Quaker back to Pennsylvania he came from!

The Fight:

Brad: Okay. I’ve Connected to Parallel 347 Brad. He’s currently in the
KFC where the fights going on. Let’s see if we can connect to him.

Parallel Universe 347 Brad: Woah. Who knew the Amish had that word in their vocabulary?
Anyways the Quaker…uh…throws his shoe at Sanders. Sanders ducks and jumps over the counter with a bucket of chicken.
He throws it on top of the Quaker’s head so the Quaker can’t see. Sanders then continuously punches him in the
stomach. Quaker takes the bucket off and decks him! Man. Who thought a Quaker would actually punch someone? Sanders falls
behind the counter.

______________

Final Votes:

Colonel Sanders 27 (64%)

Deep Fries

The Quaker Oats Quaker 15 (36%)

_______________________

Parallel Universe 347 Brad:The Quaker starts to walk away when Sanders
jumps out from behind the counter. He tackles the Quaker to the ground and pummels him. The Quaker’s taking a lot. Sanders
keep punching, and the Quaker is out cold. Sanders wins this.

Brad: Well thanks for the play by play. Bye now!

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Viewer Comment Of The Week

Quaker should win because sanders is partly the reason why America is called the fat country. which is embarrassing for
America. I don’t like either but Quaker is better. and Brent, don't think your cool just because you say words like
"ass" ....-Psycho

Congrats! For insulting Brent you get Viewer Comment Of The Week! - Eds

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Lesser Comments

Alright! It's about time we got some straight-up fist-fights, none of that gimmick fight crap. So, who would win? A old
guy who eats only whole grain and no meat, or a old guy who probably got a dishonorable discharge from the army and has been
eating greasy, fried chicken non-stop for about 50 years in order to attempt to fill that void? To be honest, that actually
took a lot of thinking. The Quaker will probably be lacking in upper-body strength, but be able to move quickly and not suffer
a heart-attack, or Sanders, who has been on the Atkins diet before it was even invented, but not exercising, so he wouldn't
have much strength, and could become dead from a heart-attack at any time now. The excitement of trying to fight a guy would
probably get Sanders' heart pumping, creating massive blood build-ups in his artery, which then may cause an aortic embolism
(That would be a great name for a heavy metal band), which is when the Aorta, a large artery coming from the heart, breaks.
Sanders' chest cavity will then fill with blood and he will die within 10 seconds. However, if he has been working out somewhat,
so his arteries might not be in that bad a condition. In that case, he would try throwing a couple of punches, which the Quaker
would easily dodge, and then become too tired to continue and collapse from exhaustion. This won't be a very close fight,
but it should be fun none the less.-Chester M., a.k.a. xtishereb, 3-time Comment of the Week winner.

It could had been four times if you had insulted Brent!

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No way around this one, Sanders dominates. How could he not. The Quaker is a lonely little religious man from Penn. Sanders
also has "The Hood" on his side. Because we all know black people love chicken. So Sanders could just flash the Wu-Tang hand
thing and the gang would be there to bust a cap in the Quaker. Sorry Quaker you ain't got no posse. -Jake-

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Quaker should win because First, I like oatmeal Second, chicken is an animal and I like animals so..................................fall
in a ditch and die colonel sanders guy, or better yet, get killed by the Quaker!

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