Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

FYI - imagine a young 20-something couple in a restaurant speaking Japanese. The subtitles explain how they've tricked everyone by making them eat fish - raw! - and giving it obscene names like "sushi", "yakitori", etc. and eating with two sticks. They get away with it because they tell everyone it's "traditional".

A to 24 - so sorry. If it makes you feel any bitter, I'm taking work home with me.
Also, hopefully on Monday, the blog will post a 24-related item I sent in. If not, I will email it to you to make you feel better.

Kat - please do so quietly, as Mr. Blog does not condone celibations on the day of his birth. However, the next day, July 4th, is a national holiday, since it's the birthday of one of Dave's heroes, the Yankee Doodle Dandy himself, George Steinbrenner.
*ducks*

Annie,
I'll be as quiet as possible. I wouldn't want to disturb Dave's meditation on this all-inclusive-auspecious date of His Holiness'es birth.
I will light a candle (a Roman candle) and send it to the Heavens in His Majesty's Honor.
May the sparks fly through the air creating little sparks of light throuhout the known world (or the unknown world, for that matter) May the number of sparks be the number of years that His Royal Majesty has left to be with us on earth,(and the number of beers that he has yet to consume)

Excellently sentiment, Kat. Since I can't say it any better than that, I'm going to go back and finish watching The Music Man.

I'm sorry, but the version with Matthew Broderick just doesn't measure up to the original. Don't get me wrong, I really like MB, but when it comes to Robert Preston's performance, you just can't improve on perfection.

*Enters after finishing the movie and removes the "ly" from her previous post*

And while I'm at it...

Mothers of River City!
Heed the warning before it's too late!
Watch for the tell-tale sign of corruption!
The moment your son leaves the house,
Does he rebuckle his knickerbockers below the knee?
Is there a nicotine stain on his index finger?
A dime novel hidden in the corn crib?
Is he starting to memorize jokes from Capt.
Billy's Whiz Bang?
Are certain words creeping into his conversation?
Words like 'swell?"
And 'so's your old man?"
Well, if so my friends,
Ya got trouble,
Right here in River city!
With a capital "T"
And that rhymes with "P"
And that stands for Pool.
We've surely got trouble!
Right here in River City!
Remember the Maine, Plymouth Rock and the Golden Rule!
Oh, we've got trouble.
We're in terrible, terrible trouble.
That game with the fifteen numbered balls is a devil's tool!
Oh yes we got trouble, trouble, trouble!
With a "T"! Gotta rhyme it with "P"!
And that stands for Pool!!!

I can just visualize Robert Preston, now: Prancing around River City in his "gay" little red uniform trimmed in gold braid and donning a red and gold lard can shaped hat, raising his baton and singing, "Seventy Six Sax Buttes in the #$% Parade!"