Pages

I AM...

I am whatever YOU think I am until YOU get to KNOW me. This is true for everyone else too, of course.. so don't make assumptions about anyone or pass judgment; ask questions. You might just make a new friend.

Followers

Monday, September 12, 2016

RUPAUL'S DRAG RACE ALL STARS: SEASON 2, EPISODE 3 - HERSTORY OF THE WORLD

How strong is
this season’s cast of All Stars on RuPaul’s Drag Race? Strong
enough to make even the typically terrible Lucian Piane musical nonsense
enjoyable.

Last night’s
celebration of the Baddest Bitches in Herstory was the usual hacky Piane camp
cheese, but nearly universally decent performances helped elevate the
proceedings just a touch.

A strong
showing in the main challenge put even more pressure on the girls to turn it
out on the runway. Who rose to the challenge and whose time in the race is now
herstory?

Let’s discuss
all that and more below!

This week’s
main challenge had each gal portray a famous bad girl from history, and it was
an eclectic mix. There’s Eve, of “Adam and” fame. There’s Catherine the Great,
Helen of Troy, Marie Antoinette and Princess Di. I might’ve picked Joan of Arc,
Susan B. Anthony, Amelia Earhart, even Hillary Clinton instead, but, as is the
case with most of these musical numbers, nonsense reigns.

I will admit
this is one of the better big musical acts, with at least a few stylistic
flourishes and comedic moments to make it better than, say, the Bitch Ball.
None of the ladies truly bomb, though Katya struggles to make Princess Di — one
of the most beloved and tragically lost figures in modern memory — “fun.”

The task for
the runway called for the future of drag, which played heavily to the strengths
of the more creative queens. Detox’s silver bodypaint Fifth Element runway
glamour snatched her a top spot, and Alyssa’s dynamic Annie Oakley performance
earned her honors despite a messy runway look. Katya’s “solemn” Di and Ginger’s
“Pigs In Space” futuristic ensemble landed both in the bottom two.

Here’s where
things get complicated. The queens had all decided they would be very objective
and judicious in their eliminations based on the judges’ critiques each week,
which sounds very fair in theory. In practice, however, things get complicated.
Technically, Katya got the far worse critique, no one would debate that. But!
If you’re looking at overall performance and the cumulative critiques of the
judges, Katya has been a stronger player. So, the question becomes, are we
making eliminations based on this sole week’s performance or all the week’s up
until this point? And at that rate, should you consider how they did on their
own seasons? How well you’ve seen them perform on tour? How many Instagram
followers they have? The list goes on.

So, the ladies’
agreement to be fair and impartial with these decisions began to crack under
the slightest pressure. Alyssa bested Detox in a lip synch that, honestly, I
found pretty underwhelming considering the titans competing. Plus, it was to
Taylor Dayne’s classic Hi-NRG anthem “Tell It To My Heart,” easily one of my
top 10 favorite songs of all time. I mean, just watch this music video and try
to tell me they didn’t do this tune a disservice.

Anyway, Alyssa
wins, sends Ginger home, and next week all the girls will cry foul that she
broke their deal and isn’t playing fair, even though she totally is and
completely made the right move. #drama.

Here’s where
the queens stand:

1. Although it wasn’t her
strongest showing, I still think this is Alaska’s to lose. She did
decently by the choreo, which is a big win for her, and I think her runway was
better than most without stealing the show. I could watch her and Ru exchange
guttural space screams all night.

2. There’s no other way to slice
it: Alyssa’s Annie Oakley killed. I obviously concur with Phi Phi’s
assessment that Alyssa is more of a GIF-star than a comedian (though I could
not disagree more with her pronunciation/spelling of “GIF”), but, in this
context, Alyssa shined. Ms. Edwards is all about physical humor, and
this was right up her alley. She’s better when someone else is writing the
material, even if that person is Lucian Piane. I thought her future drag was
sloppy, and her lip synch was more hair-flip-ography than anything else, but no
one came close in that Herstory lesson.

3. This week’s stumble aside, Katya is
still a top contender. To be fair, Princess Diana is just not that funny. She’s
not campy, and she’s totally revered. It’s tough to give her the full John
Waters treatment. Even her music was so much less stylized than Eva Perón’s
Maddona-shading tango or Eve’s Britney-inspired steamy pop. Agree that her
future drag wasn’t the showstopper that others were, but this was not her time
to go home.

4. Detox paid
good money for that body, and I’m glad she’s getting to put it to good use. As
Marie Antoinette, Detox served up some neon artistry, but the actual
performance felt a little tired. I’m not impressed by the signature Detox jaw
wobble, and was it just me or was her lip synch off? If some of the other
ladies didn’t falter so much on the runway, I don’t think we’d see her on top.

5. This is the Phi
Phi drag I’ve been waiting for, serving us full-on Karen Gillan in Guardians
of the Galaxy Nebula realness. Her Helen of Troy material was
one-joke that was hammered into the ground with all the subtlety of a guitar
smash, on which I guess she delivered.

6. It was
totally apparent that Roxxxy is a makeup artist when she
stomped onto the runway. Her mug was great, but that outfit, gurl. What a waste
of everyone’s time. That was some future of Duane Reade Halloween costume
realness.

7. Ginger began
this episode incorrectly asserting that her Snatch Game was
good and her fashion was on point on the runway last week. She was wrong on
both counts. This week, her performance in the main challenge was a standout,
but her runway was embarrassing. This season she’s been far more toad than
glamour, and it was her time to hop back home.