Pompey. 'Twas never merry world since, of two usuries, the
merriest was put down, and the worser allowed by
order of law a furred gown to keep him warm; and
1520furred with fox and lamb-skins too, to signify, that
craft, being richer than innocency, stands for the facing.

Vincentio. And you, good brother father. What offence hath
this man made you, sir?
1525

Elbow. Marry, sir, he hath offended the law: and, sir, we
take him to be a thief too, sir; for we have found
upon him, sir, a strange picklock, which we have
sent to the deputy.

Vincentio. Fie, sirrah! a bawd, a wicked bawd!
1530The evil that thou causest to be done,
That is thy means to live. Do thou but think
What 'tis to cram a maw or clothe a back
From such a filthy vice: say to thyself,
From their abominable and beastly touches
1535I drink, I eat, array myself, and live.
Canst thou believe thy living is a life,
So stinkingly depending? Go mend, go mend.

Pompey. Indeed, it does stink in some sort, sir; but yet,
sir, I would prove—
1540

Vincentio. Nay, if the devil have given thee proofs for sin,
Thou wilt prove his. Take him to prison, officer:
Correction and instruction must both work
Ere this rude beast will profit.

Elbow. He must before the deputy, sir; he has given him
1545warning: the deputy cannot abide a whoremaster: if
he be a whoremonger, and comes before him, he were
as good go a mile on his errand.

Vincentio. That we were all, as some would seem to be,
From our faults, as faults from seeming, free!
1550

Pompey. I spy comfort; I cry bail. Here's a gentleman and a
friend of mine.

[Enter LUCIO]

Lucio. How now, noble Pompey! What, at the wheels of
1555Caesar? art thou led in triumph? What, is there
none of Pygmalion's images, newly made woman, to be
had now, for putting the hand in the pocket and
extracting it clutch'd? What reply, ha? What
sayest thou to this tune, matter and method? Is't
1560not drowned i' the last rain, ha? What sayest
thou, Trot? Is the world as it was, man? Which is
the way? Is it sad, and few words? or how? The
trick of it?

Lucio. Well, then, imprison him: if imprisonment be the
due of a bawd, why, 'tis his right: bawd is he
doubtless, and of antiquity too; bawd-born.
1580Farewell, good Pompey. Commend me to the prison,
Pompey: you will turn good husband now, Pompey; you
will keep the house.

Lucio. No, indeed, will I not, Pompey; it is not the wear.
1585I will pray, Pompey, to increase your bondage: If
you take it not patiently, why, your mettle is the
more. Adieu, trusty Pompey. 'Bless you, friar.

Lucio. Yes, in good sooth, the vice is of a great kindred;
it is well allied: but it is impossible to extirp
it quite, friar, till eating and drinking be put
down. They say this Angelo was not made by man and
woman after this downright way of creation: is it
1615true, think you?

Lucio. Some report a sea-maid spawned him; some, that he
was begot between two stock-fishes. But it is
certain that when he makes water his urine is
1620congealed ice; that I know to be true: and he is a
motion generative; that's infallible.

Lucio. Why, what a ruthless thing is this in him, for the
rebellion of a codpiece to take away the life of a
1625man! Would the duke that is absent have done this?
Ere he would have hanged a man for the getting a
hundred bastards, he would have paid for the nursing
a thousand: he had some feeling of the sport: he
knew the service, and that instructed him to mercy.
1630

Vincentio. I never heard the absent duke much detected for
women; he was not inclined that way.

Vincentio. Either this is the envy in you, folly, or mistaking:
1650the very stream of his life and the business he hath
helmed must upon a warranted need give him a better
proclamation. Let him be but testimonied in his own
bringings-forth, and he shall appear to the
envious a scholar, a statesman and a soldier.
1655Therefore you speak unskilfully: or if your
knowledge be more it is much darkened in your malice.

Vincentio. I can hardly believe that, since you know not what
you speak. But, if ever the duke return, as our
prayers are he may, let me desire you to make your
answer before him. If it be honest you have spoke,
1665you have courage to maintain it: I am bound to call
upon you; and, I pray you, your name?

Lucio. Why? For filling a bottle with a tundish. I would
the duke we talk of were returned again: the
1680ungenitured agent will unpeople the province with
continency; sparrows must not build in his
house-eaves, because they are lecherous. The duke
yet would have dark deeds darkly answered; he would
never bring them to light: would he were returned!
1685Marry, this Claudio is condemned for untrussing.
Farewell, good friar: I prithee, pray for me. The
duke, I say to thee again, would eat mutton on
Fridays. He's not past it yet, and I say to thee,
he would mouth with a beggar, though she smelt brown
1690bread and garlic: say that I said so. Farewell.

[Exit]

Vincentio. No might nor greatness in mortality
Can censure 'scape; back-wounding calumny
The whitest virtue strikes. What king so strong
1695Can tie the gall up in the slanderous tongue?
But who comes here?

Mistress Overdone. Good my lord, be good to me; your honour is accounted
1700a merciful man; good my lord.

Escalus. Double and treble admonition, and still forfeit in
the same kind! This would make mercy swear and play
the tyrant.

Provost. A bawd of eleven years' continuance, may it please
1705your honour.

Mistress Overdone. My lord, this is one Lucio's information against me.
Mistress Kate Keepdown was with child by him in the
duke's time; he promised her marriage: his child
is a year and a quarter old, come Philip and Jacob:
1710I have kept it myself; and see how he goes about to abuse me!

Escalus. That fellow is a fellow of much licence: let him be
called before us. Away with her to prison! Go to;
no more words.
[Exeunt Officers with MISTRESS OVERDONE]1715Provost, my brother Angelo will not be altered;
Claudio must die to-morrow: let him be furnished
with divines, and have all charitable preparation.
if my brother wrought by my pity, it should not be
so with him.
1720

Provost. So please you, this friar hath been with him, and
advised him for the entertainment of death.

Vincentio. None, but that there is so great a fever on
goodness, that the dissolution of it must cure it:
novelty is only in request; and it is as dangerous
to be aged in any kind of course, as it is virtuous
to be constant in any undertaking. There is scarce
1735truth enough alive to make societies secure; but
security enough to make fellowships accurst: much
upon this riddle runs the wisdom of the world. This
news is old enough, yet it is every day's news. I
pray you, sir, of what disposition was the duke?
1740

Escalus. One that, above all other strifes, contended
especially to know himself.

Escalus. Rather rejoicing to see another merry, than merry at
any thing which professed to make him rejoice: a
1745gentleman of all temperance. But leave we him to
his events, with a prayer they may prove prosperous;
and let me desire to know how you find Claudio
prepared. I am made to understand that you have
lent him visitation.
1750

Vincentio. He professes to have received no sinister measure
from his judge, but most willingly humbles himself
to the determination of justice: yet had he framed
to himself, by the instruction of his frailty, many
deceiving promises of life; which I by my good
1755leisure have discredited to him, and now is he
resolved to die.

Escalus. You have paid the heavens your function, and the
prisoner the very debt of your calling. I have
laboured for the poor gentleman to the extremest
1760shore of my modesty: but my brother justice have I
found so severe, that he hath forced me to tell him
he is indeed Justice.

Vincentio. If his own life answer the straitness of his
proceeding, it shall become him well; wherein if he
1765chance to fail, he hath sentenced himself.

Vincentio. Peace be with you!
[Exeunt ESCALUS and Provost]He who the sword of heaven will bear
1770Should be as holy as severe;
Pattern in himself to know,
Grace to stand, and virtue go;
More nor less to others paying
Than by self-offences weighing.
1775Shame to him whose cruel striking
Kills for faults of his own liking!
Twice treble shame on Angelo,
To weed my vice and let his grow!
O, what may man within him hide,
1780Though angel on the outward side!
How may likeness made in crimes,
Making practise on the times,
To draw with idle spiders' strings
Most ponderous and substantial things!
1785Craft against vice I must apply:
With Angelo to-night shall lie
His old betrothed but despised;
So disguise shall, by the disguised,
Pay with falsehood false exacting,
1790And perform an old contracting.