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Now That He's Screwed Us For the 58th Time...

Welcome to Hope n' Change 2.0!

In the face of a collapsing economy, rampant unemployment, and global instability, Barack Hussein Obama took office in 2008 promising Hope and Change. The "Hope" thing didn't really work out, but we got plenty of "Change" as everything got worse. And now, the jug-eared jackass has a second term.

That's why at Hope n' Change Cartoons, we're creating conservative smartaleckry to provide a little laughter in these strange times. Cartoons will probably be posted Monday and Wednesday, and definitely on Friday. Additionally, cartoons and graphics will be posted randomly on our Facebook page and Friday we'll add the week's postings right here to kick around in one of the greatest comments sections on the Web.Note: please feel free to repost our cartoons on your favorite blogs!

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Monday, September 5, 2011

Ah, Labor Day! A day of cookouts, cold beers, and reminiscing about the good old days when there used to be jobs. Technically, Labor Day celebrates the right of workers to organize. And thanks to the Community Organizer in Chief, they're more organized than ever before...in nice straight lines, down at the Unemployment Office.

On Friday, the country learned that Barack Obama's multiple, hyper-expensive jobs programs have created an economy in which there were no new jobs whatsoever in the month of August. Which is why, after an unscheduled emergency vacation at Camp David, the president will be addressing the nation this coming Thursday as part of the NFL's pre-game warmup festivities, and announce his new and improved plans to kill the few remaining jobs.

It is widely rumored that a key component of the president's plan will be the extension of jobless benefits, owing to his steadfast belief that paying people not to work creates jobs. By that same logic, we're pretty sure that the president also believes that abstinence creates babies. It would also seem to square with his baffling philosophy that he can "lead from behind."

But just for today, let's forget all that. Let's all enjoy a day off from work (whether that's a change in your schedule or not) with family and friends.

Because on Thursday, things will surely get worse.

Obama plans to focus on creating jobs in the coffee and doughnut industry.-

In revving up Das Workers for the president, Hoffa said: "We got to keep an eye on the battle that we face: The war on workers. And you see it everywhere, it is the Tea Party. And you know what? They've got a war, they got a war with us and there's only going to be one winner. President Obama, this is your army. We are ready to march. Let's take these sons of bitches out and give America back to an America where we belong." (Sieg heil! Sieg heil! Sieg heil!)

Barack Obama then followed Mr. Hoffa at the microphone...and did not condemn or refute any of the comments above. If anything, he added to the overheated sentiments by saying that he was about to propose high-spending federal plans for rebuilding roads and bridges (yet again), in order to "see if congressional Republicans will put country before party."Great - now Tea Party types are traitorous sons of bitches, right Mr. Words That Heal?

Frankly, we think Barack Obama should start spending a lot less time with people who advocate class warfare and violence.

And Jimmy Hoffa? Maybe he should relax and spend more time with his dad.-

26 comments:

John the Econ
said...

Update Speech Predictions:

More "Stimulus", except that it it will no longer be called "stimulus", since "stimulus" clearly doesn't work, but more of it under a different name will, trust us. "Porkulus ][" will likely be the last big shot at pork for the President and Congress and their benefactors, so why not shoot for the moon?

Government Hiring: The private sector, sitting on their trillion in cash isn't hiring, so government will go ahead and do it for them. Not certain exactly what form this will take, but it will be for "shovel ready" projects, except that they won't be called "shovel ready", since everyone now knows there is no such thing. < insert video of Obama laughing about it > But they've learned from their mistake last time, so again, trust us. The shovels are ready this time.

"Help" for "small business". We all know that most new jobs in America are created by small business, and small business people who are still around are a bit nervous these days. But no problem, Obama has a plan to "help" them. It will be in the form of another complex, targeted benefit/tax/loan program which will require a team of MBAs and HR professionals on staff to administer, which we assume that all small businesses already have in place. All the small businesses have to do to be eligible is sign a blank check to keep the new hires in place once ObamaCare kicks in in 2014.

Yes, Obama is an idiot. Yes the Democrats are loons! Yes, the deficit is too big (over a $1, too big.) Yes, the nation is in the economic doldrums, yes, yes, everything you say about these creeps, yes! My conservative credentials are strong; I've been reading Buckley's National Review since I was 15, with letters from him to me to prove it! -- I am no reformed liberal -- yes, dismantle 80% of the federal government tomorrow at 9 AM, earlier if you wake up that early.

But being an equal opportunity politician basher -- I must, I simply must (and many don't like it, pfftt to you,) say this: Perry, Romney, Bachmann, Santorum, Gingrich all have a "jobs" program -- don't worry folks, they're to the rescue! They will outlaw sissy smooching! And get constitutional amendments and federal laws -- to arrest me and the 89 year old WWII vet I tend -- for the good of the nation! And preserve your marriages! By rounding up all the gay men and incarcerating us together, so we're not, um, together -- and this will bring about a new burst in prison building, for there are three times as many queers as the current prison population. And they will hire police, to inquire in my bedroom, and yours, if I do wrong by their religious beliefs! And they will spend billions doing this -- of your money; unless they seize our wealth to pay for their cockamamie schemes to be against us -- for Liberty! And Rational Thought. And family values too! And my niece and nephew, whose father died a hero FDNY on 9/11 will be able to visit me in jail, one hopes for that small gesture.

The entire political scene right now is so absurd I'm beside myself. Oh, don't worry, sissies don't have guns; we're afraid of hot hard steel rods that go boom, I assure you.

But folks, let me tell you, when I hear the current crop of creeps on the Republican hustings, I freak; they are theocrats -- beware theocrats as much as you fear Socialists -- they just use a different book to demand compliance with their ways.

There's but two I would vote for -- Gary Johnson -- a many who actually built a business and then ran for governor and left a surplus in his state coffers -- and Sarah Palin, who, because she has a differently abled son, will perhaps eventually realize I'm a differently abled son -- and at least she's not talking incessantly about the perils of sissies like the rest are.

And when a nation is fearful of its sissies, I worry much. I'm sorry. I'm venting. Ah, calm down, go play the piano Hlavac. Ah. Noting like a C-Major chord with a errant F-sharp to be dissonant. :)

The speech will present nothing new, and everyone with a brain will confirm what they already knew ... the lead-up to this "event" is all hype and no substance. If he actually had a plan, why not have it already in place? No, this will be a bunch of crap only the left could love, and the "won" will point at the right from now to November 2012 explaining how it is their fault that I can't lead.

He's got nothing. Never did ... never will. The community agitator has perfected his skills and is now the national agitator.

@John the Econ- I agree with you right down the line. I think the "big speech" is simply going to be an exercise in semantics, and applying new labels to old (and failed) concepts. And stirred in to the mix will be blame for businesses who are acting "un-American" by not hiring, blame for the political impasse in Washington due to a "small group of radicals," and a heapin' helpin' of class envy/warfare.

@Jim Hlavac- I also worry about the candidates you call theocrats, and hope they can notch down the religious rhetoric. It's funny - no one worries about Obama's Christianity because, frankly, everyone believes he's lying about it. But whatever party a candidate is from, they must be clear on the fact that America must be governed by the Constitution, and not the Holy Book of Choice.

On a different topic, I read that government snafus (is that a redundancy?) had prevented many of the invitations to 9/11 families from going out in time to allow them to visit the 10th anniversary observance in New York. Did your niece and nephew hear anything yet?

@Chuck- What better day than Labor Day to reveal an important jobs plan? Or, maybe, two weeks ago. Better still, two years ago. No, we're only going to get an earful of political crap, while this president continues to cripple the economy and hiring.

And speaking of Irony, the big news story on Labor Day is that the US Post Office may go completely out of business this year...because they can't afford the labor union-guaranteed benefits they've promised, and if they "raise revenue" by increasing costs to consumers, no one will send mail any more. It's like a crystal ball showing the fast-approaching future of all our entitlement programs.

Happy Labor Day, all, as we approach 9.11.11.Mixed thoughts: much of the widespread post-WW2 middle class prosperity in America was due to unions. However corrupt and Leftist they became, they created a suburban wage-earner middle class that hadn't existed before. Reagan's open war on unions, all unions, in the 1980s served corporate interests at the expense of the middle class across the board. Detroit makes lousy cars because management designs and government subsidizes lousy cars, not because workers earn decent pay and have (until Obamacare destroys it) decent med insurance. The USPS is a mismanaged utility proving that Government Does Nothing Well, even when it grants itself a monopoly on a vital service. Don't fall for the Left's tactic of divide and conquer.Yes Thursday smells to be more of the same, and a blowout final round of Porkulus just like a deadbeat maxing out his final credit cards and writing bad checks for new flatscreens knowing he's filing bankruptcy on Monday morning and grabbing whatever he can before SHTF.

@Andrew- I'm not trying to trash all unions. The whole point of negotiation is to get all you can. But if a union insists on more than an employer can actually pay, and if the employer agrees to it, then the business deserves to fail...and the employees deserve to lose their jobs (hello, post office).

But I'm not letting unions off the hook, either - as some have played a huge role in shoddy workmanship. I spent a summer working in a Ford plant (and was temporarily a member of the UAW). Every man on the assembly line knew how to do his own job, and the job of the man standing next to him. As a result, only one man would clock in (with two cards) in the morning and do both jobs (easily) until midday...at which point the second man would come in, and the first go home. The second man would complete the shift and clock out with both cards. One man decided that even this was too much work, so he just stopped coming in altogether and had other people punch in his timecard. Of course, the small piece he was supposed to be putting in the steering columns was missing...which caused multiple accidents, multiple deaths, and a huge recall.

Ford fired him...and the union got him reinstated. That had nothing to do with "fighting for the little guy," and everything to do with an exercise of raw power to prove "might makes right." I met some nice guys working on that line, and it's hard and potentially dangerous work. But I developed no respect for the UAW.

I wonder if he'll do something CETAish (i.e. the Comprehensive Employment Training Act) to address the horrible unemployment rate for young people (particularly, if they're black). All I remember of the earlier attempt back in '83 was being forced to find meaningful work and training for a nice enough young hispanic who didn't have the reading skills to file. I can see Obama trying to partner colleges with some sort of training program. Never mind that the people needing help will come from public schools that have already failed them. He's got to do something to win back the youth vote that helped elect him. Free I-Pads for everyone under 30? Or maybe I-phones to flash mob Republican campaign events. Surely, he's going to find some way to spend money to buy back this voting group.

@Earl- I'd bet on something like CETA being proposed (because he'll have the luxury of knowing it will be shot down). Sources are reporting that "education" is one of the focus-group approved terms that he'll be throwing around, possibly including "shovel-ready" jobs which would come from federally funded school construction projects. So job-training "education" would also fit in with the overall theme. And you may be right about him doing something like giving away iPads. This might be a good time for people to buy Apple stock...

His Homelyness was here, today, giving a big ol sloppy kiss to the unions, reminding them how much graft he's thrown their way, as they seem to be falling away from him.

Andrew, you are absolutely correct, Unions did improve working conditions and wages. I would have preferred that perhaps one employer might have tried to attract the best work force by paying them better, and making the plants safer, and let the power of competition improve things, but Henry lost the Battle of the Bridge (well, his wife made him quit - money wasn't worth innocent people getting hurt / killed) and the UAW got in there, too. That particular company makes vehicles that compete with any, in terms of quality, anymore. Granted, back in the 70s American cars definitely were crap, but I'm driving a '01 PT Cruiser w/ nearly 200k on it. Best car I've ever owned.

Are cars over-regulated? you bet (do we really NEED tire pressure sensors? Really? do we need to pay the 'extra' $1200 for that system? As an option, for people who WANT it that badly, sure - but I think I can check tires on my own, thank you)

Do they suffer from de-contenting? Corp solicits bids for wire connectors, say, and Acme comes in gold plated connections that will not rust, last 100 years, for $.10 ea, Zee's makes a stamped aluminum one that will mostly last 3 years 30,000 miles, for $.05 ea. Guess which the company orders. And insists they be produced for $.04...

But it is still a big problem w/ people going out at lunch, getting drunk / stoned, and coming back in to work on, say, brakes. Annual expose case on local news...

@Readers- Breaking with tradition, I've added quite a bit to today's commentary (up in the cartoon section) as news events unfolded today. If you look under the picture of the breadline, you'll find tasty new outrages. And I don't even get paid time and a half for working on Labor Day... (grin)

@Jim Hlavac, our "jobs" program is the same. It would effectively be "nothing". Simply a promise to keep the hell out of the way of law abiding citizens. Of course, we know we'll never actually get that. But I am certain the only "Jobs" program in sight at the moment is the removal of the Obama himself in '12, or definitely in '14.

@Andrew: Pretty much all of the reforms that labor movement originally fought for became codified into law by the end of the '50s. This left the unions with little other to do than to continually fight for higher wages and benefits and easier work rules. (lower productivity) As a result, heavily unionized industries (railroads, steel, auto, etc) became highly uncompetitive. Unionism was on the decline long before Reagan. The auto industry failed for many reasons, but not the least of them was that management had been folding to union demands for decades, until the contracts got so absurd that it was cheaper to build crappy cars at a loss than it was to lay off people.

I'd even go as far as to suggest that had it not been for the stranglehold that unions had on the railroads, we'd probably have self-sustaining passenger rail in America today.

Thanks @Earl; one more item to add to my list: Another Jobs Training Boondoggle. It's still more of the same we've been doing for decades; if we only had better trained workers, the economy would come back. And yet it never seems to work out that way. We theoretically already have the most expensive "jobs training" program in the world. It's called "public education", and it's already run and funded by a massive government-controlled bureaucracy. But instead of fixing that, (or reminding everyone what a failure public education is, especially for the "most economically vulnerable) it's easier just to sell another worthless program.

Wow! Just Wow! Unbelievable. By the time obama is done, there may not be much left of the country to salvage. The TEA party wants nothing more or less than a return to the founding principles regarding taxation, limited government and the rule of law (The Constitution). And that makes them “traitorous sons of bitches”? There certainly are some “traitorous sons of bitches” out there, but they are NOT the TEA Party. We know who they are ...

@Stiltion: Seriously? The Tea Party is a "war on workers"? This on YouTube yet? Can't wait until that makes the rounds!

This whole administration has been nothing but "a war on workers"!

Hoffa is just wishing that most of his dues-paying followers buy it. The unfortunate reality is that they're not as clueless as they used to be. (The downside of universal education and all; sometimes people actually learn!) They know that a limp America doesn't buy a lot of what they sell, so their jobs are hardly as secure as they'd like. They also realize that they're competing with other workers in this country and elsewhere.

This is why the only growth in unions you see in America these days is in government, where there is no competition.

"More time w/ his Dad. Awesome. Right up there w/ suggesting John Conyors spend more time w/ his wife (She's in Federal Penn for another two years, or so) I think many teamsters realize that the high fuel costs that are killing them are largely due to Presidential policies..

@John the Econ- If you follow the link in the Hoffa story (up in the commentary) you can see and hear the video for yourself. And you know, I'm getting sort of tired of being called a racist, terrorist, treasonous son of a bitch just because I'd like a balanced budget and a return to Constitutional principles. In fact, I'm getting more than a little pissed off about it.

@Pete(Detroit)- Glad you liked the little dig at Hoffa. I always try to say things in the nicest possible way.

@Suzy- But we'll need American-made guitars to sing our sad songs of the new Obama Depression!

@John-the-Econ -- when I worked for the county in California (an "agency" state), I didn't have to join the union ... but I did have to pay the dues. This was because they "represented" me in contract negotiations. (If I wasn't a member, they would not represent me in labor disputes; since I did, they would roll over on their backs an wet on themselves whenever a member had a labor dispute, and then assure the unhelped worker that they had done their "best" in the hearing.) I loved going to the doctor and finding out that the person in front of me in line had the same "health plan" as mine, paid half as much for it, and had a zero co-pay. Of course, she worked in the private sector (where someone is keeping an eye on expenditures)....

@Suzy -- ...and across the street from Gibson's factory, a competitor (who contributes to Democrats) once again imports exactly the same wood and doesn't even get a courtesy call from the Feds.

@suzy--Yeah I've been following the Gibson story very close and the best part is the apparently it is no longer necessary for the federal government to disclose what the search warrant is for or even what laws you are breaking for the feds to get a search warrant and seize your property....Is this the new taxation method? Just seize the property without disclosing why you are doing it and then make the "criminal" sue you in an attempt to recover seized property!

@Stilt--You're not the only one that is getting down right pissed off at the constant attacks on Tea Party Members.....my only question to the left is how in the hell is such a small group holding the government hostage???? If we were such a small fringe, extremest group as they constantly point out then how can we keep congress from doing what they need to do.....Ahhhhh Could it be that the Left is scared completely sh*tless by the thought of a balanced budget, smaller government and a return to the Constitution?

Tea Party Attacks: Personally, I hope they continue, and get even more shrill. Nothing animates people like such shallow and baseless accusations. What these desperate liberals are doing is slandering real Americans, and everyone knows it.

So go ahead. Call those of us who still respect the Constitution, rule-of-law, integrity, and have the audacity to feel entitled to the fruits of our own labors "terrorists", "racists", and "treasonous". Just keep in mind that you're offending more people than you can imagine. What you call "The Tea Party" is merely the small vocal arm of what is really the "silent majority" in America.

Ack! Made the mistake of having one of the network morning shows on this morning. It's going to be another bumpy week on Wall Street. In response to a question of "What are investors waiting for", their "economic reporter" responded "They are waiting for policy makers to step up and do something".

@John-the-Econ -- It would be nice if the "policy makers" would UNmake some of the "policy" they have already made. It would also be nice if the apparatchiki -- the "rank-and-file" operatives in the various departments, agencies and bureaus -- would stand down, too! It would be nice to live under the Constitution, for a change....

@John the Econ & Jazz- I think it's safe to say that the shrill attacks on the Tea Party will only increase. And I hope that it remains "just" defamation as opposed to a deliberate effort to inspire violence of some kind.

Regarding the stock market, the "policy makers" have already stepped up and done plenty: like raising the debt ceiling while foisting off responsibility for any budget cuts to yet another committee (like the president's own deficit reduction committee, who are apparently now at an undisclosed location with Jimmy Hoffa senior).

And there's Maxine Waters out there telling us to go straight to hell, and in the next breath asking for another "at least a trillion dollars," for "job creation." What the hell is this bag smoking/snorting/main-lining? Probably the same shit her constiuents smoke/snort/main-line....

It really does look like the lefty loonies are seeing their three year reign coming to an end, and they are panicking.

There is no way in hell the House is going to pass ANYTHING BO proposes, so get ready for the lemmings to REALLY crank it up. We ain't seen nuttin' yet!

Yes, and then the theme will be "Look, you'd all be working now, if it weren't for those evil, greedy Repubs... What the R's, TP's, conservatives, and generally anyone w/ a brain needs to point out is that we've tried that for two years, and it does not work - we KNOW what works - cutting taxes. Kennedy did it, got more federal revenue, and more jobs. Reagan did it, doubled revenue, got jobs. W did it, 20% revenue increase in 4 years, and got jobs. We KNOW what WORKS. Lefties HATE it because it's not 'redistributinist' but screw THEM - We Know What WORKS. point it out 3 ways - long, hard, continuously...

@Pete(Detroit): It's beyond taxes anymore. It's all about uncertainty. Business and investors hate uncertainty. And the last 5 years have been nothing but uncertainty. For example, extending the Bush tax cuts 2 years was completely pointless. Might as well have let them expire. Why? Because 2 years is hardly enough time, and having them possibly expire again during an election year adds even more uncertainty. "Temporary fixes" are just that, temporary. Everyone knows that as soon as they're over, there will be another round of political chaos where those looking to "fix" our economy will be free again to screw around with our businesses and lives. That is the LAST thing we need.

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