After posting for the first time in ages, I felt awesome. Energised! I went to bed later that night and my mind was whirling with ideas, which was annoying because I was tired but it was still better than having no ideas. Three years ago, when I first started this blog, I struggled so much with what to write about. I would trawl through the Daily Prompt desperate for ideas. I kept a list of links to appealing prompts saved in my phone to bust out when inspiration failed to strike me. And, back then, it failed to strike me often.

It took awhile but one day I noticed I hadn’t used those prompts in ages. In fact, nothing grabbed me when I looked through them. I had heaps of drafts lined up in WordPress and ideas would pop into my head on the bus, in the shower, before I went to sleep (which is where I got the idea for this post along with two others). It’s like your brain builds a natural curiosity about things or starts using writing as a way of thinking complicated (or sometimes very mundane) things through.

Not to say that I think it’s going to be easy from here on out but I definitely want to try and commit myself to writing more frequently. I might be busy but I’m not that busy that I can’t spare 30mins or an hour to do something I love. I can’t work all the time and do not much else. I tried that for six months and it fucking sucks. Take it from me, guys. Make the time, you’re never that fucking busy. You think you are but you’re not. And fuck, maybe you are but still, you can’t spare even 10 – 20 mins to do whatever it is you really enjoy? Go for a walk, watch your favourite program, play with your dog, whatever. You’ve got to have some ‘you’ in all that ‘them’.

So I have two more ideas for posts and we’ll see what else comes to me. There are other things I want to do besides write, like, I don’t know, maybe exercise. That’s fallen by the wayside as well. But let’s just start small. Baby steps. One day at a time. Plus I’m not super keen on getting back to exercise (to be honest, I’m that unfit I’m a bit worried) so we’ll just focus on the writing for now. It’s much less taxing. 😉

My holiday is drawing to a close in more ways than one: tonight is our last night at Pretty Beach House plus I start back at uni tomorrow. Did you hear that? It was the world’s biggest sigh.

I went online to see if my study area was open yet (it wasn’t) but I was able to download the unit outline and start mapping out my weekly tasks. Things don’t look too drastic considering I’m only studying part-time so hopefully that means I won’t spiral off into stress-induced depression and panic. Full time work and full time study is definitely not an ideal situation although, if I’d stuck it out, I’d be done by now.

Don’t think about that, Natalie. Don’t think about that, Natalie.

Ahhh what can you do? I can’t change it now plus those first 15 months of study were fucking insane. I was so stressed and unhappy. Even when I did take time to socialise, I had this bastard voice in the back of my head reminding me what I should be doing, what tasks I still had to do and the proximity of my next assessment. Goddamn, can’t a girl just have a cheeky bender in peace and without judgement? Apparently not.

But this time it’ll be different, I’m sure of it. Part time study = at least 12hrs per week, which is manageable with my 25hrs at my part-time job and roughly one additional day of admin stuff for Jared’s bar. That’s full time work and part time study on top. I should be OK – hopefully without needing to do too much study stuff on weekends. And maybe, maybe even still have time to read and write and oh I don’t know have a social life.

We’ll just have to wait and see what the next 13 weeks have in store for me.

Jared did pretty well on the birthday front. The below is my home for the next three nights. The weather is a bit grey but it’s still warm and we have a giant king bed and our own private heated swimming lagoon (which is surprisingly deep!).

I can’t lie, life is pretty good. I’m currently naked on the couch with a delicious glass of red in hand (well, on the bench near the couch – can’t type and drink at the same time) listening to The Beatles – on vinyl. I’m such a poser, I don’t even recognise myself. Oh wait, I’m nude. It’s still me.

The record player is actually a bit of a highlight. I remember playing Michael Jackson’s Bad and Off The Wall on my mum’s record player and dancing round the room. Ahh the memories. I feel like a little kid again although, if you can believe it, Jared has never used a record player. Apparently, his parents never had one. So, to remedy this situation, we snagged some albums from the main room and have so far listened to Edith Piaf, John Coltrane and now The Beatles. He’s officially hooked on the charm of it all although there’s something to be said for the endless stream of music that is Pandora or Spotify. Getting up to change sides or pick a new album is wearing a little thin (for me, at least).

So, yeah. That’s me for the weekend. My goals are pretty simple:

Eat all the food

Drink all the wine (and cocktails)

Eat all the dessert (yes, it deserves a separate bullet point from food – how dare you suggest otherwise?!?)