Thursday, June 14, 2007

A White Girl's Perspective on Latin Guys

I have been asked, by more than one tall, blonde local girl, to do a post telling short Latin guys to stop hitting on them. The thing is, I really lack the proper perspective form which to write this as I am neither blonde nor a girl. Apparently, though, they find it kind of irritating. This bodes all the better for me, of course, because the overabundance of short guys hitting on them forces tall girls to go for the first guy over 5’8” they see, which is often me. At any rate, I suggested to one of the ladies who wanted me to do such a post that she write one herself. And so she did. What follows is what is going through the mind of a tall, attractive American girl when being hit on unsolicited by a short, Latin guy:

Being a tall, blonde-haired blue-eyed female, I would like to share my thoughts on the perplexing phenomenon of short Hispanic guys hitting on tall, hot, blonde American chicks. A pandemic that, while not unique to Miami, is more offensive when it occurs here due to the particular nature of Miami's social (ab)norms.I say "pandemic" because I can't think of one girl who's ever discussed this topic with me and expressed anything other than sentiments ranging from mild annoyance to downright personal offense.

The typical encounter generally proceeds as follows:Hot blonde chick (HBC) sits down at bar to await the arrival of her friend/date. She intends for her behavior upon entering the bar to place the various Hispanic men around her on notice that their overtures will fall on deaf ears should they be dumb enough to direct them at her.But the usual games of pretending to wait for a friend, or even better a boyfriend, fail 99 times out of 100 with most impervious-to-rejection Latin guys.

Despite HBC's careful analysis of the situation and resulting seat selection, she is immediately eyefucked by every Hispanic guy at the bar.And not a one of them has the decency to hide this fact from the Marta's and Maria's and Maricella's who either accompanied them to the bar or wish to accompany them home.So now poor HBC has to deal not only with the incessant eyefucking but she must also manage to act like she doesn’t notice the 10 fat Cuban chicks glaring at her while plotting her demise in the women's bathroom should HBC be dumb enough to venture there alone.

As said Latin Guy approaches, HBC makes an effort to avoid the impending uncomfortable encounter.She looks down at her phone (it must be on vibrate, because no one heard it ring), hits a button and starts talking. "Hey, Babe.Where are you?I got you a beer."She speaks slowly and in mono-syllables so that this guy, who is now brushing up against her elbow due to the fact that his concept of personal space is just as impaired as his ability to read white women, can understand that she’s talking to her man. Unfortunately, he doesn't care.He interrupts her phone conversation to ask her where she's from. (This is always a safe question with white girls, as it’s clear they usually aren't from here.)

That's it. HBC has had it.She might be polite, but this is downright insulting.Not only is she on the phone with her man but, even if she weren't, who gave this guy the impression that someone like HER would be interested in someone like HIM?Perhaps if she stands up he will see that she is a good 3 inches taller than his 5'5" and will immediately realize the err of his ways.So she does.Yet, instead of him mumbling some half-English excuse and running away with his tail between his legs, he says in that all-too-familiar Miami accent, "Wow.You're tall."

At this point, HBC doesn't even have to pretend to be a bitch, because she is thoroughly incensed that she has done everything in her power to discourage this interaction, to no avail.HBC gives said Latin Guy the cold stare she reserves specifically for unwanted male advances, turns back to her phone, and very loudly explains to her answering machine that "This short asshole next to me thinks its ok to interrupt someone in the middle of a conversation. What the fuck?!?!I know, I know.Seriously.As if I would go for someone like THAT.We've really got to find some new hangouts.Like maybe in Broward."

In the spirit of open-mindedness characteristic of this blog, I think it’s likely there is some underlying motivation behind this phenomenon that us white folk have failed to ascertain.Perhaps these guys just want to be seen talking to a white chick for long enough to convince that little gordita across the bar that, while he could go home with a white girl, he chooses her.Nothing gets a Hispanic girl's panties wetter than thinking her guy passed over a chance with a pretty white girl to be with her.

Or maybe he is angry with white women in general, for constantly acting as if height corresponds with dick size. Either way, maybe this pisses him off enough that he takes every opportunity he gets to make white girls uncomfortable.Or maybe, like White Dade, these guys just like to play the odds of the fact that there just aren't enough white guys in Miami to go around and so, at some point, an HBC is likely going to have to settle for a Latino.

Because it surely can't be the case that short Hispanic guys actually think tall hot blonde chicks are attracted to them….Can it?

This is appalling on so many levels. I believe that we (women) are ALL in agreement that being hit upon by rude, disgusting men is annoying, but it sort of defies explanation that anyone would be so narcissistic as to think it only happens to them because they are tall and blonde or warted and hump-backed or whatever. Doesn't matter how good-looking (you think) you are, if you are actually this ugly on the inside.

I'm with Latinbombshell on this one too. I get hit on alot here, but it's still a hell of alot better than getting NO attention or having insults thrown at you! Sure, sometimes it's annoying, but I would never be a bitch to a guy who no matter how badly done, is, in his own way, paying you a compliment.

Since this was my post, I'll take responsibility for responding to the comments:

Chris Mora - Obnoxious rich guys, of any race, are the worst. I love nothing more than shooting them down. I feel it's my duty to the rest of womankind to trim their egos.

Weird Asian Script - My original words weren't very PC, either. WD had to do some pretty extensive editing to make the post bloggable. The original included such pearls of wisdom as “Silly Girl, subtleties are for white people” and multiple references to Hispanic guys’ dick sizes.

Anon 1 - Did you READ the post? WD didn't write it. I did. And I am from the South, where etiquette is paramount, and there’s nothing polite about Latin Guy coming up to a girl sitting at the bar and interrupting her phone conversation to hit on her.

Latin Bombshell – I don’t think anyone should get over themselves. If more people were appalled by the rude behavior and disrespect of women characteristic of this city, more people would call the offenders out on it and it would happen less often.

Xavier – You’re a Latin guy, aren’t you?

Alex – I bet you are, too. You guys DO understand that a lot of things written on this blog are written for the purpose of pissing you off, right?

Yvette – I never said this ONLY happens to me because I’m tall and blonde. Perhaps you need to work on your reading comprehension skills.

Aikin – Thanks. I actually suggested to WD awhile back that perhaps he should have some of his likeminded Miami friends continue his blog in similar fashion. No response. Perhaps he fears that some of the offensive things they’d probably say would be attributed to him. I don’t know. I DO know that he found my original post too inflammatory to post in its original form.

Anon 2 – I don’t take disrespect as a compliment. It is very direspectful for any stranger to assume that my time is so worthless that he should decide for me that I would rather talk to him than continue my phone conversation. It is further rude to continue harassing me when I’ve made it clear that I’m uncomfortable with his advances.

Anon 3 – See my comment to Anon 1. I can’t comment on whether any of WD’s girlfriends cheated on him with Cuban guys. However, given his stated preference for tall hot white chicks, I can say it’s unlikely. If you can’t figure out why, reread the post.

Andy – Good strategy. It’s ballsy enough that, if you’re a tall hot white guy, I might actually find it charming and buy you a drink. If you’re a Latin guy, I’ll probably attribute your grabbing ass to male chauvinism and have you escorted out of the bar. Stereotypes are a bitch, huh?

I let the author respond individually to most of the responses, but for the things directed at me....

Anon - If by not trying you mean lettign other people do my work, then yes. But the content is written by another person.

Last Anon - I have been cheated on, but as HBC so deftly put it, the kind of women I date tend to avoid Latin guys. Why they date me. If they wanted to date a hispanic, they would, its not too hard for them. So when they do cheat, it is typically with naother tall, good looking white guy. Which, while still irritating, is at least comprehendable.

HBC - I have said I would be happy to hand the reigns over to other people but somehow I doubt the blog would be the same. Email me later and perhaps I"ll give you instrucitons on how to do it.

The Asian Script person is named Gen, just for the record.

And good call on the lack of cheating girlfriends cheating with Cubans. Your logic is dead on.

Stereotypes are there for a reason. They are there because someone, or should I say multiple people act a certain way and bingo! Black people don't work and are good dancers, White people are racist and cant dance, American Indians are good at drinking games, East Indians are phone solicitors, Latinos are illegal immigrants and are generally short with small penises, Asians are illegal immigrants and are short with small penises but more than likely own a convenience store and drive an Acura and so on. Get over it.

I happen to know HBC personally and I know she's not racist - she loves big black guys. You chicks are just pissed that she called you all "gorditas". It's not HER fault that you eat fried pork on fried rice with a side of lard for every meal.

It requires much more thought to judge people on an individual basis than to say, "Hey that asian guy is good at math."

P.S. I don't know where you are getting this latino people are short thing. I have the feeling you are creating your own stereotypes because you have a gripe with a particular group, most likely because one fucked your girlfriend or picked on you when you were in highschool.

As for divisivness, its natural. If it weren't everyone would live in one big cluster thuck of a city in Asia if they really and truly wanted to get along with everyone. People don't like other people. It can be of the same or different race but its a fact. I choose to live where I do because I like its setting, weather, people etc. I choose not to live other places because I didn't like its setting, weather, people etc. Of course there are the exceptions to the rules but many of you choose to ignore that.

I generally give people the benefit of the doubt, but if I see a black guy driving an 85 cadilac with doo rag banging rap music I'm gonna stereotype him instantly. Is that really my fault or just human nature?

If I see a white guy in a pick up with cowboy hat on and singing to country music, I'm gonna do the same thing I did with the black guy. Again, is that my fault or human nature?

I really think people who make big deals out of stereotypes generally are the ones to blame for them being there in the first place. Its a theory but I think a damn good one.

Quote: "This type of humor belongs in a small town mid western morning show for people with low iq's and a complete lack of worldliness."

Wasn't that a bit stereotypical of a statement? People here are only tolerant to things they want to tolerate. What a bunch of hypocrites. You preach tolerance and acceptance ... as long as it fits your views and ideals. The instant someone is intolerant of your ideals you call them names like bigot, idiot, racist and other names to make you feel better about yourself and beliefs. Isn't calling someone a bigot who doesn't want to associate with people of other races being intolerant to them? Couldn't you be in fact the bigot for not respecting their ideals and beliefs. I agree with Anon1, this is America, quit your whining and learn the language.

He has the right to say what he says just like everyone else has the right to be call this prick on his shit.

I am not saying all humor needs to be pc but if you are going to tackle a sensitive issue such as race try to at least be funny instead of hateful.

For the record if people want to be left alone and not associate with other races that is fine but as soon as you start making derogatory statements about a group of people on the internet you are bound to offend.

Anon – No, but I am generally the tallest person in a bar I go into here .At all of 6’2”.

Anon2 – She doesn’t want kids, actually.

Anon3 – you forgot drive Acuras BADLY

Anon4 – I have not heard that Latins have small penises either. Then again, I don’t have any experience with them so I wouldn’t know, but they don’t have that same reputation as Asians. Being a girl, though, I would trust HBC’s assessment.

Hot Brunette – I think her love of big black guys stems more form southern taboos. Just a guess

Anon5 – Again, it is the constant ramming of Latin culture down my unwilling throat that makes me upset. The short thing is true. Look around Miami most guys aren’t too tall. I can think af maybe 10 Cubans I’ve met over my height in 9 years. I grew up in Oakland and Seattle, by the way. The minorities who picked on me were mostly black. And I generally tend to like black people.

Anon6 – Actually, HBC and myself both have IQ-s over 140. Not exactly genius, but not exactly dull either. Its called smart enough to spot a trend and smart enough to speak your mind when you know your opinion is unpopular.

Xavier – Intersting. In Miami, though, most Xaviers tend to be Laitn.

Anon7 – Good theory

ANON1 – Guilty as charged. We all know Jews have nappy hair.

Anon8 – I am not a bigot. I don’t like Latin culture, but I judge people individually. And, oh yeah, I DIDN’T WRITE THIS

Anon9 – Most of my posts are witty. Witty at the expense of other people, but witty nonetheless.

Anon10 – Interesting you say that. You get a total sense of world culture living in Miami. And you know what I’ve learned by my extensive exposure to it? It sucks. So I am not sheltered, quite the contrary. I have given Latin culture a try, for 9 years, decided it blows my asshole, and inform the public of my findings.

Anon11 – What small town were you referring to? Sacramento? Oakland? Seattle? Orange County? I’ve never lived in a city without pro sports, so please enlighten me where my “small town” mentality comes from.

LT. W – I like Mexicans, actually. I really enjoy taunting Cubans and South Americans.

Anon12 – Take me down a peg? Riiiiight. Read the comments on the Jenn Sterger post. If that couldn’t deflate my ego, nothing can.

Anon13 – Like the people who say “You know what I hate? Judgmental people!”

Anon14 – Again, I didn’t write this particular post and I found it to be entertaining but that may just be me. Mine are typically pretty funny.

actually this short/tall business in Miami is more due to climate than necessarily a typical latin attribrute. I lived up north but went to high school down in ft lauderdale and I can tell you from what i saw the white dudes up north are a little taller than the white dudes i grew up with in ft lauderdale...actually come to think of it I noticed that in the black guys as well, as far as a general trend. i mean you can compare norwegians to greeks in the same manner, you'd probably find similar results (as far as location)

"But if latinos are short because of the climate wouldn't that make people who are in africa and the middle east even shorter?

Just saying."

well look at east africans who tend to look a LOT more different than west africans (i'm thinkin kenyans etc). many africans and arabs actually should be taller because like the northern europeans they have to survive in harsh climates. the deserts can be very cold at night, so its similar to the year long variation the northern europeans face.

Plus even if he didn't he still condones this type of entry, which makes him as guilty as HBC."

I don't agree with that. He let a guest columnist write a post for people to debate on if they so choose. CBS used to interview Charles Manson and get his views on things. Does that mean they condone what he did just because they gave him a forum to express his views?

"I guess bigotry trumps etiquette in the south."

I saw this earlier and had to respond. The biggest bigots I’ve ever met are from the North. At least a southerner won’t make any bones about being a racist. A person from the North is more likely to be as sweet as sugar to your face but would freak out if black guy dated their daughter.

Um are you actually comparing this blog and hbc to CBS' interview of Charles Manson?

This "guest" blogger was brought on because she shares the same bias as Dade and he thought it would be funny to have someone back up his point of view.

I was talking about her statement anyway. She is the one that made a point of saying that she hates Latino guys because they talk to her when she is on the phone. But when another commenter replied that he would just grab ass she said if he was tall and white it might be ok.

So in that instance bigotry did trump ettiquete.

So yea he does condone this type of behavior.

You people are silly.

That happens everywhere but it is definitely more prominent in the South.

I expected either to hate the article, or to laugh if it was funny – potential for some funny ass shit was there. Well right off the top– shit ain’t funny. But shrill tone and all - I didn’t hate it either. Everyone here (latin/non-latin) has seen at a bar when “little Jorge” strutting around like some hamster pimp....turns his attention to tiffany/lisa/heather who usually stands at least a foot over him. The greater the look of disgust and contempt on Tiff’s face, the more effort little man gives to woo her.

Face it, its funny as hell. And part of you has to admire just the ego -and sheer balls- it takes to do that. Like Quijote against the windmill 9.9999 out of 10 times he will fall on his ass, just to dust himself off and do it again. But, then again little Napoleon...depending on his station in life, as well as game might just hit the lottery.

Anyways am against the general proposition of short dudes with taller chicks. That happens when you are 6' 2 (almost 6'3).

White girls here are hot, better than most cities not called LA, San Diego or Chicago.

And not being able to hold a stick to latin women....

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

hold on....

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

That comment was so ridiculous I came out of retirement.

WTF are you guys talking about? If we are only talking Miami-Dade - excluding Lauderdale. you can say that in Miami Beach/Sobe.there are some very hot "white" girls. But outside of that, its kind of underwhelming. On the other hand there are some extraordinarily HOT latin women all over Miami, from Hialeah to Kendall, Doral, the Beach, Gables, etc. And when I mean hot, i mean they would turn heads anywhere.

i randomly found this blog. I just thought your blog was a little negative on those latin guys man. I always thought those latin guys had it good because of the positive stereotype of the latin lover or whatever.

anyway, if I think the solution is if they hit on shorter girls...and thats it. I think that white chick should be more appreciative of the attention though, ugly chicks dont' get attention at all.

oh please hot blond chick my ass by the time you're 30 you'll be crusty looking and no one would want your old saggy wrinkly ass. and don't worry about people hitting on you cause the younger better looking girls will get hit on and you'll be all alone trying to dress and look young... (seen it all the time white women still thinking they got it, b!tch you're too old Its over your time is up now go get uglier with everyday.)

Hey HBC! I'm not white or hispanic but I think you're an ignorant, American whore who thinks she's better looking than a hispanic girl. You make yourself sound like a Goddess but you're a filthy fucking whore. Just coz you have blonde hair and blue eyes, doesn't mean you're a any better looking than any other girl from any race, get over yourself. I hate this filthy attitude of white American women.

Your "multiple references to Hispanic guys' dick sizes" bespeaks less than casual acquaintance. Repulsed by Hispanic men, you nonetheless seem to be as fixated on their dicks as the schoolmarms and typists who used to go on week-ends to Havana before the Revolution rebuckled their chastity belts.

My wife is Chilean and she complains about being hit on by Mexicans and Cubans. The long and the short is of it is they have no class. Same with their women. But that's OK, Doesn't take class to be a farm laborer.

I`m proudly chilean, the army of my country kick the asses of yankies in peace exercices, we never lost a battle, no matter if the enemy is more stronger than us.We are not fags like USA ( you`re gobernment if doesn`t like something, a country, a race, a city, drop bombs in the area and blow up everything, so fucking bitch, if you like to have sex with gays or fags ( white USA males) yo don`t know what are you loose, we are real mans.

You poor dumb whitey girl. I bet your biggest goal is to become famous through a 'stolen' sex tape of yourself fucking a pseudo-famous guy posted online, only to then reach a deal with a porn company and launch a fragrance called "Glamorous Putain" or something like that. Now, if you do just that, you'll be able to change the wheels of big ol' mama's home.

You can come suck my big Venezuelan dick. That is sure to change your perspective.

wow,I'm a latin guy 6'0" half spaniard half guatemalan not to dark not to light,no small penis and don't say mami alot,don't hit on girls or eyefuck them if i see your concided your not worth my time.Have respect for woman and obviously you haven't been hit on alot because last time I checked every whether white,black,hispanic will hit on you if you fly.

Blogger...I was wondering if you distinguish between ethic latin men, or Americanized Hispanic men with class? There is a difference, as i have dated several caucasian women with great dispostions along with a few asians and of course a few Hispanic women. Each had their redeeming qualities and I enjoyed making them smile. When these undesireables approach you just practice on them for the real date. All women love attention, even when they don't want it, they can still appreciate the sentiment and kindly send them on their way. That takes a little class though. I'm sure you understand.

First of all, I never heard about that Latinos are short with small penis. I'm proud to be a Brazilian mestizo, tall, pretty, dark eyes .. In my opinion, Hispanic women are more beautiful and better in bed than the "tall blondes" And I'm sure that the big question that he could not answer is: WHY DO WHITE WOMEN CHEAT WITH LATIN MEN?

Maybe his GF was fucked by several hot latinos like me .. Get back to your illusion world stupid !!

Wow. How could a person have the audacity to post something so ridiculous? I am 19 years old, i am a woman, 5 foot 11, Caucasian , I get hit on atleast once a day...I'm pretty sure every girl deals with the same shit on a daily basis. You are SUCH an airhead. I cannot believe I just read that. I really got a good laugh out of this. You really do need to get over yourself. Be a real woman and suck it up. And to be honest there is nothing more unattractive than a woman who is so ignorant and narrow minded.All you need to do really is open your mouth and you won't even have this problem anymore. They will be running away from you.so RIDICULOUS.

If you sit there starring at your phone acting like a little girl, ofcourse there going to approach you. If you are soo hot and soo tall, muster up some confidence, walk in there with your head up, give them all the "don't f*cking talk to me" eye, grab a drink, wait, and suck it up. Men are men, no matter their race. They know they are not going to sleep you at the end of the day anyways. Its just for their entertainment...and it looks like they have done a GREAT job at making you feel uncomfortable)

When your old and ugly you will miss how these men glorified you. Stop complaining. You sound ridiculous.

I'm going to ahead and think like you now...What the fuck should we expect from a blonde though, right?

Southern white people: Incestuous, cow-herding, redneck hillbillies that love sitting around 13" TVs in their trailer park home, watching NASCAR on Sunday's; waiting for their brother or sister to get home so they can 'relieve' themselves for the day?

Because she love's big black cock. In other words, she's a fucking hoe. She only goes for black guys because of the whole black myth thing. I'm Puerto Rican and I have a hot blond chick. My height is 5' 9 and she's almost my Height. Tell you're HBC if she loves big black cock. Then she's missing out on some good Latino dick you bitch.

White girls don't usually prefer black men. They prefer Hispanic guys way more than blacks. They marry Hispanic guys 4 times higher than blacks. The media has definitely tried to make you think white girls wants blacks so bad. That is a jew/white cuck fetish and we all have to suffer it.

And when I say Hispanic I mean Hispanics that are as close to original as possible. Euro-Mediterranean looking, or simply not too Amerindian looking, though I've still seen plenty of real dark Mexicans with white girls. But they prefer more mixed/closer to Spanish looking Hispanics. Do they prefer blacks over the real short Indian looking ones? Yeah, probably. But most decent ones would prefer white men or more Spanish looking Hispanics 2nd.