Stories from a Northern Heart

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Allegiance

This latest pondering has been inspired by a variety of different events, conversations and suppositions. In the interest of the piece not becoming self-defeating, I think it best to clarify, it is not about any one thing.

I have friends who are thankfully many and varied. Some much closer than others obviously but I enjoy connections with a number of people in my life. In the main, I try and maintain friendships as best I can and always with an open mind. Life often gets in the way of sustaining regular contact with people I admit but I am of the opinion that friendship endures time and distance. I’m happy to pick up the page from whence it was left, no matter the time elapsed.

What I find unfortunate is when friends turn against each other or take issue with each other. I struggle to handle that as it becomes difficult to keep a peaceful head and it becomes even more troublesome when there is an expectation of allegiance from one party over the other. I have been in the position a few times over the years where I have “picked sides” and almost always regretted it at a later date for a number of reasons. To every story there are usually three sides, consisting of the respective viewpoints of the two parties plus a third side, the truth. Unless I am in full possession of the facts and directly affected by them, then I don’t actually feel qualified to reach any meaningful conclusions, let alone take issue myself. I find it more unfortunate when the party who expects my allegiance ceases contact when they suspect it’s not forthcoming, rather than discuss it with me. I am left with no choice at that point but to question the friendship which is sad indeed.

I have learned a lot of this the hard way as I freely admit there have been occasions when I have been at odds with individuals (fortunately not many) and friendships have been tested by my attitudes. Thankfully a life lesson which was learned and closed a long time ago.

I think the bottom line is I endeavour to be loyal to all of my friends and to remain peaceful as much as possible. As I have stated in previous posts, if I am your friend then I shall always be. Whether you wish to be mine or not is your own choice but of course I hope you do.