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Welcome to my blog. I hope we can help each other endure the pain of the addiction of a daughter or son.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

NO SHOW

I texted Beth last night to please answer if she was alive. No answer. She texted me this morning wanting to withdraw her normal allowance at 8 in the morning. Huh? An addict awake at 8 in the morning.

I said I was afraid she was dead last night. HOw about coming with me to check out the methadone clinic this morning? I told her that she has asked me to stay available for her call about 3 times in the last week and then did not call back for days. I told her that I thought she was near death. She took about 15 minutes to answer but she said that yes she would come with me to see the methadone clinic.

I let her withdraw her 20 bucks to put enough gas in her tank to get over here and never heard from her again today. There was a man with her. She called me so I knew that it was her and not just someone she gave the phone to.

She was supposed to come to my house by 9 am. At 9:15 I texted her again. No answer. At 10 am I went for a walk with my friend who knows the whole sad story but never mentioned any of this to her. I need to vent. I vent with you because you know this life. I trust my friend but I do not want to contaminate every aspect of the life I have left with this sad business.

I had (still have) a very good friend I ran with for years. For many years, all I did was talk about Andrew on every single run. God bless her, she just listened. In retrospect, that had to get really annoying to her..day after day..month after month..year after year.

You are doing the best you can. Keep putting the offer of methadone out there every time you are in contact. Maybe,just maybe, one day she will show up.

I hope that Beth will be in contact. Not having any expectations is hard. I needed an ear many times but had no one to talk to about alcoholism until Al-Anon. Not even the therapists understood. What a relief to realize that I am not unique in this situation. We share the pain and the solution.

Oh Beth, Keep the faith. You are such a wise woman. I am so sorry you are going through this though. I'm glad you are here and letting us walk with you through this. We can't make it alone, can we. Much love to you.

Anna, I am praying. For Beth to make a healthy choice and go with you to see the clinic. For God to put someone in her path that says something to her, at the clinic, that penetrates and awakens WILLINGNESS in her heart. For strength for you and the rest of your family during this extra stressful time. (Hugs!)

About Me

I am in transition to retirement. I retired two years ago at age 55. At that time, I was emotionally recovering from a very hard patch. My mother, mother in law father in law and two very close friends all died within that year.
Now, I am 56 years old and working part time as an adjunct profesor. I am enjoying my semi-retirement.