What Your Office Snack Says About You

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November 13, 2014

Even if you’re a three squares a day type, you almost certainly have your favorite office snack. It’s your go-to treat on hard days, your emergency fuel during late nights, your guilty pleasure or your virtuous energy boost. What you eat when you’re at work can make you more productive or totally lethargic, depending on what you choose and what your particular body needs. One thing is for sure, though: while you’re scanning the vending machine or digging in the fridge, your co-workers are learning a lot about you.

Do You Know What You're Worth?

1. Kale and granola.

Who You Are: Good health, personified. You’re the person who suggests a group hike for the next company event, or starts an office cycling team. You probably have a lot of energy, because you consume so many antioxidants.

What Your Co-Workers Think of You: Depends on how that energy is expressed. You are either an endless font of positivity and fun ideas — or a reminder that their own diet needs an overhaul. Just keep the latter in mind if someone grumbles about your trail mix, and give them a break.

2. Radioactive-orange crunchy things.

Who You Are: Remember those disembodied celebrity heads in Futurama? If it were at all possible using today’s technology, you’d do the same for yourself. Who needs to pay attention to the demands of the body when there’s all this code to write?

What Your Co-Workers Think of You: They’d mock your diet, but they probably need your expertise. Don’t be surprised if a Costco-sized jug of artery-clogging snacks shows up on your desk around the holidays.

3. Vending machine candy.

Who You Are: Desperate. You’re either too busy to catch lunch, too close to payday to spend the cash on something better, or too in thrall to your cravings to resist the siren song of your favorite treat.

What Your Co-Workers Think of You: If you’ve worked together for any length of time, they probably know to stay out of your way. Also, if you notice, the really bad-news snacks are always running out. Clearly, you’re not alone.

4. High-Protein Treats.

Who You Are: Training for a terrifying sporting event, probably involving doing several activities in a row, such as shooting targets and then convincing a team of sled dogs to help you deliver a vaccine … before it’s too late.

What Your Co-Workers Think of You: As with kale-and-granola above, they’re probably split between wanting to roll their eyes at you and wishing they could get it together to put some healthy stuff in a plastic bin and bring it with them. Also, maybe they’re afraid of you. Depends on where you’re at in the whole muscle-building cycle.