Posts Tagged ‘Denmark’

The Ministry of Defence has confirmed today that it has placed a large order for Lego bricks with the famous Danish manufacturer. ‘We’ve been evaluating these devices as anti-personnel weapons for some time,’ said Major Roberts of the Defence Procurement Agency based in Abbeywood, Bristol.

While a Cumbria Zoo has been celebrating the arrival of an animal normally only seen in the wilds of Niger, predators in Copenhagen have been hard pressed to restrain their salivation. Since their success in disguising an ‘all you can eat giraffe buffet’ as environmentally-friendly euthanasia, Scandinavian lions have been getting particularly ‘skittish’; demanding ‘gazelles with long necks’ to sate their new appetite.

The hard line taken on the Marmite trade by Danish law-makers flies in the face of experience and could lead to lucrative new revenue streams for organised crime, says Torsten Hesselbjerg, who was the Rigspolitichefen (head of the Danish police) for eight years until 2008.