52 weird things about working in Silicon Valley

Working in Silicon Valley can be fun. It just sounds cool doesn’t it? That’s a rhetorical question for people who don’t live here and never have.

It’s the Tech World’s Mecca, and has a huge concentration of start ups and well-seasoned giants. There’s Google, Facebook and Apple just for starters.

Whenever you plonk an industry-full of people in the one geographic spot, it’s going to get interesting. There are tech heads and millionaires, nerds and kingmakers, venture capitalists and people who don’t own fancy cars.

Here’s my list of the strange things I’ve noticed while working in Silicon Valley.

Instead of messaging people, you “ping” them. For example: “Just ping Marc and get him to email the information on that project”. It’s annoying.

Having at least five online messenger apps to ping your coworkers on. Even though they sit 10 metres away from you.

Picking up the phone to call someone isn’t exactly frowned upon, but the recipient won’t be happy.

Small talk before meetings being all about the latest XBox/Playstation/Switch game that’s come out and how far you’ve played.

Modes of transport to work vary. Everything from motorised unicycle-looking contraptions, to skateboards, motorised skateboards, bikes, and company shuttle buses.

Laughing at said modes of transport is frowned upon. Best keep it to snickering behind your hand.

There is a “secret” Gentleman’s Fight Club, also known as the Silicon Valley Fight Club, for stressed out nerds.

If you’re lucky, you’ll work at a company that doesn’t mind splashing around some cash. There’ll be free snacks in the office and a cool Christmas party at the end of the year.

If you’re unlucky, you’re working at a company with a great reputation that doesn’t translate to dollars in the bank. But you stick it out because it looks great on your resume.

And now for a few extras from a discerning co-worker…

Some companies won’t hire you if you wear a tie, or high heels to an interview. They expect a serious candidate to do research on company culture. Read: Sit outside HQ and carefully study the accepted attire.

Median household income is $110,373 (US median is 47.8% less at $57,617, 47.8%). Median Apartment Rent list price $3,648 (US Median is 56.2% less at $1,597). You’ll make more money, but you’ll also spend it all.

It can be difficult to determine to what degree someone is upset because their colleagues lost their jobs, or that the office snacks were removed as a cost cutting measure. Especially if both occur at the same time.

College prestige = brand name + distance from SF Bay Area

Twenty-year-olds speak of making million dollar mistakes, while they are “still cheap”, earnestly.

There are plenty of non-tech jobs.

Open office spaces are in style, with acoustics and privacy a tertiary concern. The loudest person is usually surrounded by the most coworkers.

There are opportunities to be given free pizza and beer in exchange for your attendance at talks by people at the forefront of their field.

Internal company communication is often informal. It is often not out of place to throw in a cat picture by the third email in a chain.

Backpacks are common even at customer facing meetings.

CEO, as a title, is often misused where owner, and not always lawful owner at that, should reside.

There are events where bankers in suits and techno punks in hoodies sit next to each other and mingle. This is not seen as abnormal.