Is your child afraid? Parenting expert explains the best way to speak to them about the London terror attacks

Anita Cleare has advised mums and dads not to avoid the difficult questions - but keep your answers short and simple

By Josie Griffiths

4th June 2017,12:52 pm

Updated: 4th June 2017,1:23 pm

A PARENTING expert is offering advice to parents who are unsure how to speak to their kids about the recent terror attacks in Manchester and London.

Anita Cleare wrote the useful guide on blogging site Mumsnet, explaining that it’s impossible to “wrap your kids up in cotton wool” and protect them from news of attacks like last night’s killing spree in London Bridge.

1. Don’t avoid discussion

“Keep it simple. Say something like ‘I’m feeling a bit sad because I just heard about a bomb that exploded in such-and-such a place and lots of people died. I wanted to tell you about it in case you hear about it too.’

“They might ask lots of questions or they might not be interested. But they will know they can talk to you about it.”

Anita adds that mums and dads should always answer their kids’ questions, and should do so with “short and simple” answers.

When they change the subject, you know you have fully answered their question.

2. They may worry it will happen to them

Anita says: “When children hear about tragic events, they often immediately link these events to their own lives and worry that something similar will happen to them or their family.

“Do reassure them that they are safe. Emphasise that these kinds of events are very rare, that they don’t happen very often and that the vast majority of people never experience them.

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“But don’t resort to outright lies. Telling children that something could never happen (when they can work out for themselves that’s not true) can result in them not trusting you or your reassurances.”

If they bring it up, let your kids talk about how they would react in a similar situation, Anita adds. Just don’t dwell on it.

3. Let them get upset

Anita says: “It is important to help them work through their feelings. Don’t avoid talking about it and don’t dismiss their feelings as silly.

“Ask why they are upset, listen to their concerns and let them know that their feelings are ok. Then prompt them towards an activity that might make them feel better.

“Younger children can be guided into play, whereas older children might want to get involved in charities or fundraising as a way of making a difference.”

You could take inspiration from these acts of kindness following the Manchester terror attack, which saw kids as young as six-year-old Joseph Griffiths helping out.

Witness films people running for their lives and bloodied victims after London Bridge attack