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By Caroline Ghosn

I woke up one Monday morning last month and for the first time in a long time felt like I could expand to fit the air in my room. For context, I am usually an extremely happy person, but lately I had been feeling tepid at best. That Monday, I decided that it was time to leave my cushy, “prestigious” job, and put it all on the line to build a company around an idea that I believe in. Yes, it really was that natural in that moment. I woke up and it had been decided.

All of the feelings and thought processes that had been whirring in the backdrop and foreground (alternating according to the time of day) of my mind had coalesced into a higher realization. A yoga teacher once told me that my constantly squirming toes were the sign of an active mind. If she could have seen me in that moment, suspended in this small epiphany, my perfectly still toes would have rendered her speechless.

I first began to realize that it was time to leave my job when the sight of my manager’s telephone number on my screen made my heart contract and burn. Granted, it was 2 AM on a Sunday and he was calling about a label on a Power Point presentation. But overall, he was a great, funny guy and these calls were relatively normal for this top consulting firm. I just couldn’t quite understand why the appearance of these digits was so disheartening.

In retrospect, I can now better disaggregate the factors that made me realize thatit was indeed “Time.” I believe that these same steps will hold true for you if it’s your “Time” as well. In addition, we PYPs share a few characteristics that make it easier to extrapolate. We’re educated. We’re motivated. Let’s be honest, we’re usually more “Type A” than we like to admit. Some of us keep to-do lists (guilty), and all of us get things done more often than your average Jane.

Your particular situation will be different, but the underlying tenets will be the same, no matter whether you’re moving from a big company to start-up mayhem, switching from one law firm to another, or moving from a less structured environment to a corporate one. In any case, these factors break down into the following feelings (in chronological order)

1) An inexplicable attraction to some other career path, no matter how off-topic relative to yours (I call this the “shopping around phase” – you may still be in denial that you’re looking elsewhere for something better). This is characterized by wanting to understand other people’s jobs and is usually followed by some subliminal evaluation of those alternatives relative to your own role.

You may justify to yourself that “you make more money,” “at least you have job security,” or “you’re so happy that you can get free dental cleanings with your souped up health insurance plan,” but really, the nagging feeling that there’s something better out there only grows larger.

2) A need to cheat a little and date a different job for a day. No longer content with reading career profiles and Days in the Life, you actually want to experience the ins and outs of being a creative director or a lawyer or a writer.

I call this the “exploring other fish in the sea phase” – you now accept that you’re shopping around for something better, but you feel guilty and maybe a little dirty in your soul for taking Sunday to help your friends set up for a documentary shoot. You go to your friend’s shoot, half-hoping that it will make you appreciate your phenomenal health insurance plan and your secure career path. Instead, you secretly find this new flavor to be delicious - and you want more.

3) An involvement in a project that is closer to your passion. You’re officially two-timing your job. You’ve found something new, and you may (as much as you hate to admit it to yourself openly, something you’ve obviously not done in front your parents) be spending as little as an hour a week on it. It doesn’t matter - you’re hooked.

Chances are, you’re spending more and more time on it with each passing day, because you feel that you are moving in the right direction on your career path and that you’re developing more robustly than at your current job, leading us to …

4) A constant assessment of how a marginal hour of your time at your current job compares to an hour spent on your passion project. You are falling in love with the new entrant in your life. And you may be falling hard. It becomes more and more difficult for you to justify spending an hour of your “type A” energy on the gig that is currently paying your bills. You can’t stop thinking of how much value you could be adding to this alternative project in that amount of time.

Your concept of time well spent is dizzyingly changing. You care less and less about that free dental cleaning. You’re preparing the speech to your parents in your head. This may go on for months (as was the case for me), until finally, you experience…

5) A heavy, bland dread that sinks into your chest slowly replacing your usual ebullience and enthusiasm. You know you’re with the wrong mate. And it’s time to move on and take a risk on this emerging new love of your life. And trust me, PYPs, it’s time to get out quickly - and gracefully. This is a very dangerous place to be – you need to get out before your performance at your current job takes a serious blow. Your mind isn’t there anymore and it’s imperative to get some time on your HR rep’s calendar to figure out your next steps.

It’s time to set up meetings with your workplace mentors where you’ll thank them and explain your transition. If they’re real mentors, they will know this is best for you and appreciate your graceful pre-departure notice. This was my experience. Your timing might be different; your new entrant may be of incomparable character. After all, no two loves are the same. Your courtship may be more tempestuous or take longer to sink in. Ultimately, nobody can decide for you that it’s the right moment to quit your job, just like nobody can decide for you that it’s the right moment to fall in or out of love. However, although coming to terms with your next step is underpinned by intimate intuition, knowing the signs that demarcate the steps along the way will help you feel more certain that you are indeed passing them. Recognize the path that you’re on early, PYP, and the world will be your oyster that much more quickly.