Opinion

MORNING everyone, and welcome to a busy stretch of the M25 where some
crazed lunatic has taken it upon himself to cut his fellow drivers up,
with little or no consideration for other motorists. The consequences of
the sort of driving we've just witnessed could've been disastrous.

"Not only will this take valuable time away from the significant
contribution veiled women make to the French economy via online poker,
but will also interfere with prayer mat routines and cooking along with
Nigella..."

"OI you, saggy flaps!" I shouted at the trolley dolly as she walked down
the aisle to serve one of my six bodyguards, "I think you'll find that
this is only a triple measure of Jack and I specifically asked for a
quadruple. Be a luv and bring us the bottle."