December 3, 2014

You might be wondering why your Steam client is magically updating Goat Simulator. The answer is of course that we just released a new patch!

We've fixed a lot of issues, mainly achievement bugs, quests that didn't work, but we've also added some new achievements and you'll also be able to use the inventory as a mutator on the first two maps as well!

Here are the full patch notes:

General fixes:
The MMO level won’t autostart for new players.
Force Load button on the play menu to load out of date mods.
NPC now goat armor.
Start actor can now be rotated to view class.
XP bar no longer overflows.
Minimap now works for multiple players.
The Portal in Twistram is now open after completing DumbleDoor’s quest.
Resetting game now clears mutators.
Fixed issues with Flappy Goat not rendering.
The inventory is now a mutator that can be used on any map.
Dodo follow up quest now works.
NPC’s also reports as quest items so that you can bring McSlowpants on your inventry to the tavern.

New DLC Available

About This Game

Goat Simulator is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! WASD to write history.

Gameplay-wise, Goat Simulator is all about causing as much destruction as you possibly can as a goat. It has been compared to an old-school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. Destroy things with style, such as doing a backflip while headbutting a bucket through a window, and you'll earn even more points! Or you could just give Steam Workshop a spin and create your own goats, levels, missions, and more! When it comes to goats, not even the sky is the limit, as you can probably just bug through it and crash the game.

Disclaimer

Goat Simulator is a completely stupid game and, to be honest, you should probably spend your money on something else, such as a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe pool your money together with your friends and buy a real goat.

Key Features

You can be a goat

Get points for wrecking stuff - brag to your friends that you're the alpha goat

Steam Workshop support - make your own goats, levels, missions, game modes, and more!

MILLIONS OF BUGS! We're only eliminating the crash-bugs, everything else is hilarious and we're keeping it

In-game physics that bug out all the time

Seriously look at that goat's neck

You can be a goat

Mac and Linux Disclaimer

The Mac and Linux ports are still in Beta. Expect problems. We're working on fixing them asap!

Goat Simulator has a deep story line and boasts some of the best physics and graphics I've seen in any modern day game. The portrayal of each character is well thought-out and the achievements gained by playing the game are meaningful. Whether you are gracefully flying over a map after a large explosion, or helping a person cross the road, players of all ages are bound to enjoy this game. My grandmother watched me play the game, and now she has set up her own Steam account for the sole purpose of playing Goat Simulator. Even my dog Clifford is getting into it, and now has accumulated over 300 hours worth of solid gamplay. Coffee Stain Studios should be given a big pat on the back and a rousing round of applause.

They say "don't knock it til you try it".... well, let's not go down that alley, but this on this other hand DEFINTIELY applies. It has Physics. It has a goat. It has Fire. It has a goat devil. What else do you really need.

This game is creative, it has a good sense of humour to it, and damn enjoyable, but also requires skill and patience to master different objectives and techniques.

Its something you can just pick up, have some fun, and come back to whenever you want to have some virtual destruction in your life.

I always knew there was something wrong with me. I licked people, I liked destroying fencing, and I enjoying ring-fighting goats. I never knew there were others like me. I stumbled apon this game and I needed it. I wanted it. I HAD to have it. Since I was poor, I had to have it gifted to me. Soon, it popped up in my gift inventory and I quickly started and dowloaded the game. I was transported to a land. A land of my people. I met other people like me. Or should I say goats like me. I soon had a family of goats. They were my best friends. Soon I decided it was the right time. I went to my doctor and decided to become a goat. After the surgery, I put my hooves on my keyboard and began playing. It felt wrong. I was making fun of my people. Soon, as a rebellion, I began acting out. At school, I would sprint down the hall and headbutt teachers and fellow students. They all laughed at me, they thought I was different. I logged back into Goat Sim and consoled with my people. Soon they advised me to continue. I skipped school the next day. I ran through my town, screaming and licking. The cops could not contain me. I ran to the petting zoo and let all of the goats free. We soon took over the world. Bow down to me, peasants, or join us, become a goat WITH US! MUAHAHAHAHAHA

Have you ever dreamed of being a goat? Exploring lands as a goat? Maybe smashing into cars and watching them blow up? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this game is for you! If you answered no to any of these questions, this game is for you!

Goat Simulator is a game in which you take on the role of a goat. An invincible goat, that is. You start in a small town with a party, construction site, and a satanist sacrifice forest. You can simply roam the city and explore, you can cause mass chaos and blow up gas containers or parked cars, you could become a sky diving goat and jump off a construction crane, hitch a ride on a paraglider, or get hit by a bus just because you can!

What you can do as a goat

Fly with a jetpack uncontrollably

Get hit by a bus

Lick a bolder and throw it down at civilians having a barbeque

Have a party and become DeadGoa7

Get beet up by people in an ally

Ride a bike

Use your oh so powerful tongue of yours to hold onto a ferris wheel

Swim by simply jumping in water and willing yourself to move

Become an angel goat

Become a devil goat

Become a anything-you-eat-will-turn-into-a-bomb goat

Go on the workshop and become a <fill in workshop item here> goat.

Do anything else you've ever desired to do as a goat

Run head on into a building/car and just fall down

Scale walls with your amazing goat sprint jump ninja skills

Run into civilians and hear them scream because they fell over and watch them glide up and run away

Walk into a carnival, jump into a booth, people scream, trying to run away, and then say "Is that a goat??!"

Fun to play, neat concept. I love the ragdoll physics. When it gets old after a few hours, engage Big Picture mode, throw a couple controllers at the kids and watch them pee themselves for hours of inappropriate hilarity!

While the joke may not last for long and $10 is kinda a hefty price for a joke game, the concept of a goat sandbox game like this was an interesting one, and for the time I played this game, I had a great time, what with the intentional bugs and odd jokes. If you're into that kind of thing and don't mind plopping down the cash, Goat Simulator is for you!

So I like this game a lot, however it's a joke. Even jokes get old, and I know the people who created this game wanted to make people laugh by the physics. However, after 5 minutes of gameplay, it does get very boring...

I used to recommend this game, but now, after like an hour of playing it, you get really bored of just walking around and smashing things! Sure I might play it once in a while but I do not recommend you buy this if you get bored of fast games easily!