How Pinterest Ruined Weddings

July 31, 2013

I know almost nothing about weddings. I’ve only been to about two in my life and I’m pretty easy to please on the wedding front. Give me an open bar and a dance floor and I’m a happy girl. Plus I’m usually too busy doing things like burning my dress while ironing it 10 minutes before we have to leave to actually be focused enough to notice details (yes, that happened).

Can you see a burn mark? Nope. But it’s there.

But today I’m here to tell you: Pinterest ruined weddings.

Okay, that’s a slight exaggeration. Pinterest is the only reason that (at some point) my boyfriend will have an 83% chance of selecting an engagement ring that I actually like. It’s how I knew not to wear navy or orange to a wedding last month, because the bride’s Pinterest account made it obvious that those were her colors. And Pinterest is the reason that I bought mason jars to use as drinking glasses.

But Pinterest has also lead us astray. It’s lead me to believe (more times than I’d like to admit) that craft projects are a good idea, that I can DIY for everything, and that my hair should be in a cute hairstyle every day (sooo not gonna happen).

Let’s not get too unique with things, mmkay?Pinterest takes trends too far. Mason jars? Check. Burlap? Check. Photobooth? Check. You get my drift. Pinterest has allowed us to borrow ideas, spread and copy trends, and somehow those unique little additions to the wedding became the norm at every wedding.

Pinterest did more for barns in the last three years than farmers did in the last 300.

Who knew that almost any old house in the country could be the perfect wedding location? I didn’t. But you know what tons of barns don’t have? Air conditioning. You know what’s necessary when your guests are in their Sunday best, drinking and dancing? Air conditioning. Too many weddings got a little too rustic, folks.

I have a bone to pick with you, grey and yellow weddings. You see, back in the day I bet most girls just picked their favorite colors and that was the color scheme. These days, Pinterest is chock full of really common color schemes that started out as super unique ideas. Be honest, before Pinterest you didn’t think grey and yellow matched either. Now it’s everywhere.

Pinterest is stressing brides out. Who decided that every wedding needs a fabulously adorable seating chart? Don’t you dare throw a wedding without picking out bride and groom signature drinks. And you’ve just got to have a hanger with Mrs. So-And-So on it to hold your dress so the photographer can take a picture. It’s the details people. They are just way too much.

Here’s a tip to every bride out there. No one is going to remember if you have monogrammed napkins. No one. So save yourself a couple of bucks and for the love of gawd, relax!

Did you do one of these things at your wedding? Good! Don’t be offended. Since I’ve never had a wedding, what the hell do I know? Nothing, that’s what. Now excuse me while I get back to pinning wedding stuff.

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Hi, I’m Nadine. I'll try not to be a mommy blogger but that's probably where this is headed. Oh, and I'm definitely going to try to convince you that Philadelphia is the coolest. I love my husband, kid, and dog (but who doesn't?). Let's be friends.