I found out there was a homebirthing midwife in my area and I talked with her last night. She is a lay midwife becuase in NY they do not allow midwives to attend homebirths, or something along those lines.

Has anyone used a lay midwife for a homebirth? How do you convince your DH to agree if it is techincally illegal?

We are using a LM this time. As far as legality, Texas is so good with their birth laws I can't offer more than my own thoughts. Having a LM would be no different than birthing in your home with your mom (or sister or mailman). No one can arrest you for choosing to birth at home. I would imagine that because she is an LM that if there were complications she wouldn't be held liable. I could be so wrong on everything but there's my 2 cents.

I used a LM for my last delivery and it was great! I agree with the PP about legalities. I'd say talk to her again and make sure you completely understand how it works. it may just be that CNM's can't do homebirths, not that they are illegal altogether. Do your research so that you & DH can make an informed descision.

Sandy, here is a TinyURL for birthpartners.com http://tinyurl.com/y75ccb It has information regarding the legality of midwifery in NY state as well as a list of providers. You can also attend a local LLL meeting to possibly find a LM (or find out about the ones you've already contacted) by word of mouth.
As far as convincing your DH, take him with you to meet the MW. The vast majority of the time after meeting the MW the DH will come away not only supporting HB, but telling others about how great it can be!