So we’ve been trying to create my “safe place” in therapy. It’s not been easy. The very idea of safety seems, to me, such a falsehood… the best I could do was start with a “happy place.” That part was kind of easy. There’s a place we used to go camping when I was a kid. It’s still the one place I try to visit every summer, even if it’s a short visit. Something about the mountains and nature in general has also been so calming to me, but this place in particular, seems to still hold a certain magic. Probably remnants of the magic I felt as a child everytime we got to go.

So, once we identified the place… we had to figure out how to make it safe. My homework this week has been to try bringing people into the space that would meet those needs and make it a “safe place.” The hardest need for me to meet was emotional safety and support. I tried really hard bringing real life people into my space to meet all these needs, but this was the one I just couldn’t quite fill. So my therapist suggested trying characters from the books I read or the shows I watch… (he knows I’m a huge geek).

So I gave this a try, but found that I have a really difficult time, if not a complete inability, to separate emotional intimacy from physical intimacy. Which, when I realized this, made a lot of sense. However, I finally did think of someone that I think can offer me the emotional support, without it getting confused with physical stuff. And he’s kind of a cross between fantasy and real-life. I referred to him once as “my ghosty best friend”… he passed away nearly 2 years ago. I’ll save the details of that friendship for another day, but the memory I have of him… I can sit there next to him in the mountains in silence or in tears and it feels ok.

So I’ve spent a lot of time this week thinking about who I’d bring to the mountain with me and today I was having a bit of fun with it. I thought it’d be fun and good for me to write it down. GBF (Ghosty Best Friend) is the only real life person there right now… but…

My fantasy camp would be accessible through various secret portals that are only accessible to the people I’ve invited here. It’s gonna get a little crowded in here, but it’s fantasy, so there’s plenty of room to go around. (Yes, I AM about to go through a giant list of favorite book and tv characters so, buckle in!!)

OF COURSE, I have to start with…

Buffy Summers.

(I know, you were probably expecting someone else, but we’ll get there…)

How can you not feel safe with a Slayer on your team? I mean, she’s saved the world, a lot. She’s got the physical skills, and emotionally, she’s had to carry the weight of the world. Buffy spends time at the camp training other Slayers and of course, ME, to fight. Plus, we’re great pals 🙂

And while we’re in Buffy’s world… I’m going to have to invite:

Willow Rosenburg and Tara Maclay.

I’ve always felt an affinity for Willow and Tara is just plain the best. Plus these girls have some real power between them. They bring their awesomeness and magical knowledge to share with the camp.

Oz.

He’s a musician, a werewolf, and all-around cool guy. I mean, Oz would be awesome to hang out with. So,while he brings some physical skills to the table, mostly I just wanna hang out.

Rupert Giles.

Of course, Giles has to be there. He just does.

Winifred “Fred” Burkle / Illyria.

In my fantasy camp, they coexist together. Fred is basically the best, and Illyria is a badass. What kind of super camp would this be without them?

Anya, Angel, Spike, Cordelia, Lorne, Faith…

and basically the rest of the team, ’cause I wanna be Scooby.

MOVING ON! (Man, this list is going to get long….I really wanted to list everyone individually, but I’m finding this to be soooo time consuming because I don’t know how to format this page properly! haha… I think I might have to do more group listings…)

These guys have all given everything to save the world… they don’t have much, but they have each other. And they’re gonna go down fighting. I’d want every one of them on my team. These guys could probably teach me a thing or two about fighting, too.

Young John and Mary Winchester, Charlie Bradbury, Gabriel, and Chuck Shirley.

Ummm, you’d be crazy not to want Chuck on your side 🙂

Charlie- you are my heart and soul and you will live happily ever after at camp!

Osric Chau and Kim Rhodes

As much as I love their characters on SPN, mostly I just want them to join my camp and be my friends.

NEXT UP:

Um the whole crew from Serenity?

I feel this needs no explanation.

Also the Leverage team.

I just want to be part of the team 🙂 It looks like fun…

Ok. I am NOT done with my fantasy camp invitations. But I’ve totally run out of steam 😦 This is fun though. Building my own little world… maybe I can imagine a safe place after all…

"If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is, 'God is crying', and if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, 'Probably because of something you did'." ~ Jack Handey