Everyday Post: Mental Health Issues – Sober (Revisit – Story Based)

There was nights when the wind was so cold making me feel it to the bone and there was days where the sun could be so cruel; I knew my tears were starting to dry up forever, I knew the day that you left I had finished because I had banished every memory that we had together and now it’s all coming back to me. Yes it’s all it was a very long time ago but I’ve got no excuses for of these goodbyes; call me when it’s over because I’m dying inside, wake me up once the shakes have gone along with the cold sweats have disappeared. Please call me when it’s over and I just have my old self that we both knew will reappear.

I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know why I do it every time because sometimes I just want to cave in; I’m tired of fighting for my life especially what’s left of me, I try and I try but I just wish you were here to hold me. I’m so lonely.

Mum I’m so sorry I’m not sober anymore, daddy please forgive me for all the drinks that I’ve spilled on the floor and to the ones who really never left me we all know that we’ve been down this road once before. I’m so sorry that I’m not sober anymore.

I’m sorry to my future love the man that’s stuck by my side every step of the way; loving me, saving me from me and from the inside my head. I’m sorry for all the people who tried to help me and watch me fall again; I just want to be a role model yet I’m being judged by people who think it’s okay to do so, talk about lies that they really don’t know what’s going on in my life. I’m only human like everybody else.

I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know why I do it every time at the best of times I don’t know what’s causing it. It’s only when I’m lonely and tired of fighting with my head. Sometimes I just want to run away to a cave so no one can find me; I can just let myself cave inside myself because I just don’t want to fight anymore. I try and I try to hold on but just hold me. I’m lonely.

Mum, I’m so sorry that I’m not sober anymore and daddy please forgive me for the drinks that I have spilled on the floor. To the ones who really never left me, we’ve been down this road before and I’m so sorry that I’m not sober anymore.

I’m not sober anymore. I’m sorry that I’m back here again. I promise that I’ll get help. It really wasn’t my intention to get back into this place. I’m even sorry to myself.