Monthly Archives: June 2018

Here’s how (somehow) you justify the redic logic of the Supreme Court’s decision on upholding the Travel (translation: Muslim) Ban. Basically, you 1) like it or 2) you don’t. And if it’s No. 2, we don’t give a shit:

To get to the decision, the Supreme Court basically assumes that the Administration’s justification for the Travel Ban is legitimate. Namely, it views the “Muslim Ban,” (shit, I mean, “Travel Ban,” aka “Tan Ban,” aka “Travel Ban on Those with the Tan” aka “I Don’t like the Tan” AKA “GITONUPOUTTAMYMOMMACUNTRY”) as based upon the origin of country, as opposed to the origin of religion.

In reality, it’s a friggin’ Muslim Ban.

Here’s the deal. A Muslim Ban is bar none unconstitutional. It favors one religion over another. It also bars a person from entry into the Country on the basis of religion. This is a clear violation of the Constitution’s First Amendment to the Bill of Rights. You can read about it here.

If you ban people, however, on the basis of the country of origin, as opposed to their religion, it seems neutral. The Supreme Court, at least 5 justices out of 4, assumed the ban of entry of certain individuals, in the case of Trump v. Hawaii, was based upon the country of origin as opposed to the religion.

In law school, they teach you, if it smells like shit, it’s probably shit. And yes, this decision is shit. If you want to read something that actually makes sense (because Robert’s decision does not, despite logical gesticulations, and rationalizing for 90 pages that makes it seem somewhat sensible, thanks to the law clerks, until the waft of shit returns, like an infant with the milk shits, and then just when it can’t get shittier… appears Kennedy’s two-pager … which in the midst of a giant diarrhea doesn’t even cover enough pages for a wipe, so you realize the ol’ man may have finally lost his mind, the ol’ guy who you put your faith in once, when suddenly his reasoning makes even less sense, and you need to feel better), read the dissent.

Did these damn powerful judges on the majority not even write those 90 plus pages? Roberts’ decision is so dog-shitty, he must not have. He’s too smart. Must have been those minions from Harvard or Barvard or whatever. Roberts was probably at Virginia Beach, doing cocaine or something…Does that make us feel better at the Party Blog? Probably…

Now all of sudden, this whole thing is out of control…

So if you break down the decision, there’s two options:

Roberts and Kennedy believe that the Admin. is telling the truth when they justified their travel (Muslim) ban. This assumes that the reason for the travel ban was for “national security.” Which is why we had to ban some random ass countries that have 0% evidence of inflicting terrorist attacks.

Roberts and Kennedy know the Admin. is lying, and don’t give a shit…because…well…oh shit…there’s not a good reason “because.”

If you believe #1, then completely disregard the numerous statements that the purpose of the ban was to bar muslim dudes. (Goddamit Maverick!)

Let’s be honest – No. 1 was the reason. Everyone knows a hot dog is made of pig lips and assholes. Everyone knows the travel ban is for Muslims. But for some reason the Supreme Court does not (or at least 5 dudes on the Supreme Court does not. So Forget about no. 1. Ignore No. 1. It’s not No. 1. I can’t get him off my tail.).

Finally (in the truly inexplicable pattern which is starting to develop) the aiders and abetters of the current administrations are somehow trying to right the wrongs of years past. Why? Not sure. Hopefully to make themselves feel less shitty at night.

“Yo, Adrienne! We are the PartyBlog were pissed off when Drumpf pardoned Jack Johnson. Why didn’t you pardon Rocky Balboa when he went to jail for tax evasion! Pardon Rocky yo! YO!”

Also, new party rules:

Sly Stalone will never, ever be cool again? Sorry Rambo.

Do not appear in the same room as the Donald, aka the Great Gastro. There is no reason to ever appear with the Colace in Chief unless you are serving him with Court papers. It’s just for “PR” (that stands for “Public Relations” not “Presidential Respect”):

There is no way to undo past harms and injustices. Unless of course…REPARATIONS…There was ZERO reason to pardon a dead black boxer other than: 1) to prove a point to Cohen not to testify, and 2) to look cool with “YO ADRIENNE” and some other boxers so you seem less like a racist fuck.

Dickface Dump McShitterpants and reparations is like a dog not sniffing another dog’s asshole…or it’s like Muslims and the United States. Not happening…

CHIEF ROBERTS: “YO ADRIENNE – IM A NOT A RACIST FUCK!”

In line with the (white) notion of “let’s undo wrongs and make a right” without actually doing anything, Monsieur Supreme Court Justice of the Fascist Right overturned No. 3 of the ignominious distinction of the Worst Decisions of All Time (noted above): Korematsu v. United States (1944). As reported by CNN’s Ariane De Vogue

“Roberts was troubled enough with the comparison [ by Justice Sotomayor, of the similarities between his decision and that of the Korematsu decision] that he did something that no party involved in the travel ban case had expressly asked for: He announced that the Supreme Court was overruling Korematsu.”

Weird. To summarize – Justice Chief Wompom Pow Ban All Nonwhites – was so disturbed with his law clerk’s decision’s being compared to Korematsu … wait for it … he declared Korematsu no longer existed… So just like that, with the swipe of the pen. Japanese in pens no longer part of American history.

To summarize. The SCOTUS Court, highest Court of the highest country in the land said:

We can ban muslims, as long as we don’t call it a muslim ban.

Do not compare this decision to the Korematsu ban, which said that we can ban Japanese, as long as we don’t call it a Japanese ban.

Because I don’t like the comparison between these two cases, Korematsu is no longer the law of the land.

One of these things are not like the other…So let’s keep out the Other. Less representation, less reparations, less rights. And by less rights, I mean, less Muslims. As long as their circle is smaller than ours, it’s cool.

2) Don’t wear a halloween costume that has paint or shit all over it. This is a common theme, but you will fuck up your sheets. You don’t want to get home tipsy and then have to clean a bunch of sheets.

Also In light of Halloween – we just want to point out the following from the Karate Kid. Daniel Russo shows up as the new kid in town. He hits on Johnny’s girlfriend shamelessly, then wonders why Johnny wants to beat his ass. During the Halloween party, Daniel Son ruins Johnny’s good time by spaying him with water and ruining his weed. Not cool.

Michael Flynn chanting “Lock Her Up!” at the RNC, then less than a year later facing federal charges and jail time, certainly that was it.

Fine fine fine. Certainly if Donald Trump supports a child molester…

Wait – no?

How about overseeing a pathetic response to a historical natural disaster that killed over 4000 American citizens – which went ignored by the Admin. because CNN did not cover it in the manner in should have? No…

Overseeing his family’s attempt to cooperate with a hostile foreign government to win the election…#fakenews.

Well surely locking up children and ripping away babies breast-feeding from their mothers? #Obamasfault.

Well…ok fine…sleeping with a porn star and making sad attempts to continue the affair while your wife – now first lady – was pregnant with your child, paying her off, lying about it the affair and lying about not knowing that your henchman consiglieri paid her off…c’mon…that’s gotta piss off the evangelicals am-I-right? #Giv’em-a-mulligan…

So none of this passed muster for the official Zombie politician of the 21st century. If only the American populace knew that Zombies are not desirable and should be immediately decapitated (figuratively of course!).

But this is it. This is seriously it. Trump supporters yelling “Space Force! Space Force! Space Force!” during a Minnesota rally and being excited about it. This has got to be the dumbest show of Donald Trump support ever. Social Evolution at its finest! It cannot be that in two years we will be looking back at this and saying, “Space Force! Brilliant!”

Sixth branch of the armed forces. This must be the stupidest thing I have ever seen and heard. Space Force! We are going to use the Force. And it’s going to be in Space.

Trump orders U.S. military to form ‘Space Force’ as the sixth branch of the American military.“We must have American dominance in space.”The U.S. military currently consists of five branches: Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines and Coast Guard.

Not lost in all of this … the day before Juneteenth (which our ethnically challenged President failed to even remotely address in his personal twitter account) … El Dookie states (Note: punctuation is best attempted, but let’s be honest his holiness the Dali Lama of shit hotels and even shittier ice-wine cannot be bothered with punctuation):

“VERY IMPORTANTLY I am hereby directing [SNIFFLE] the Department of Defense and Pentagon to IMMEDIATELY BEGIN the process [weird pointy maneuver] necessary [SNIFFLE] to establish a SPACE FORCE as the Sith [sic] branch [more creepy hand motions] of the Armed Forces [double pointy maneuver] that’s a BIG Statement [Mike Hot Pants nods, and the Great Cornholio blinks twice] We are going to have the Air Force [Triple H Crotch Motion Dance] and we are going to have the Space Force [large penis gesture] separate [small penis] BUT EQUAL [large penis motion repeat] It is going to be something…”

Yes indeed … separate but equal.

And the crowd cheers for separate but equal…the old Space Force. Yup – we put the Dick in dictator.

Separate but equal is a notion from the Jim Crow South. It’s a bad thing. It is how our various forms of local and state governments justified systemic racism throughout the country. History Lesson: Separate but Equal is how school districts throughout the country argued that segregation in schools was acceptable. Think about that for a second. This country believed that it was not appropriate for a white person to go to school with someone who is not white. The Supreme Court in Brown v. the Board of Education, in 1954, ruled that separate facilities for education are inherently unequal.

Now – 64 years later – Separate but Equal is Back – and in SPACE!

So…now what? Trump is going to reinstitute the draft and send the blacks to space? Tune in next week on – “HATE YOUR NEIGHBOR!”

Just wait, two years from now when the trade war with China is at full thrust, the banking industry and evisceration of banking laws causes another financing catastrophe, the housing market is tanking (due to raising interest rates and skyrocketing building materials), and no one has healthcare…that’s not what takes down the administration. Nope. It’s how dumb those Minnesotans and others in the near future felt when they chanted – like a bunch of drunken uncles – “SPACE FORCE! SPACE FORCE!”

IN OTHER NEWS:

Trump overturns rule that his administration created to separate families at the border.

He Fixed it! Yay! Only our leader – the Supreme Commander of the Space Force Army can be so benevolent! Give him credit for fixing a problem that he created when he didn’t really fix anything…

Turns out – according to the cheap rag New York Times and their shoddy two-bit reporters who never say anything nice (Michael D. Shear, Abby Goodnough and Maggie Haberman) – there are still problems with the policy. Families may still be separated after 20 days (Wait – they all can’t stay in prison together forever? If only we could get rid of Courts). Still don’t know what’s going to happen to the 2000 + children, toddlers, and infants in custody (who remain in custody on average for approx. 60 days)? Oh don’t worry that the officers who are “watching” these babies aren’t allowed to touch them, hold them, basically leave them in a crib unattended. There are diaper changers on hand. It’s fine.

And then there’s this…which is clearly an Onion Article…

Melania Trump does not care – do u?

This take down in Splinter shows that (gulp) maybe this was all just for a photo-op (GASP)?!? Just take off the jacket upon arrival, avoid the bad optics, and there’s no harm. No! I’m so sick of the media presenting the mail-order bride-in-chief negatively!

State-sponsored murder in the ‘Burgh.

And to top it all off, a seventeen year old, unarmed kid in Pittsburgh (Antown Rose) was shot to death (note: for a non-state actor, this is called murder) by a policeman who was sworn in a mere 90 minutes before the shooting. But according to Fox News’ reporting (vis-a-vis the Allegany CountyPolice Superintendent Coleman McDonough), it’s fine because under PA Law:

“…there are circumstances that permit officers to use lethal force on a fleeing suspect. It is allowed to prevent death or serious injury to an officer or another person or if the suspect has used or threatened violence or possesses a lethal weapon.”

Whew! Fox News – just when I was worried that my whole privileged world-view may spontaneously combust around me and light my head on fire – you answered everything and made it better. So what that the kid was unarmed and running away? Fougetaboutit. Let’s just call the kid a thug and move on…

Not so fast. Apparently the officers’ claims that the child was involved in a prior shooting was “unsubstantiated” (translation: made up). The family attorney, D. Lee Merritt, wants answers.

Hold on hold on…what’s this look like – Jeopardy! We’re the police. You don’t get answers.

Jeopardy does not have answers, it has questions…and yes we have questions…

What’s this look like – Jeopardy? We’re the Police. You don’t get to ask questions.