Forum » Topic: CERN To Start Work On Large Hadron Collanderhttp://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=6104
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Golgo13 on "CERN To Start Work On Large Hadron Collander"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=6104#post-18342
Mon, 21 Jun 2010 11:51:45 +0000Golgo1318342@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Some of the world's leading pornographologists have gathered in San Fernando Valley, California - centre of the world's adult entertainment industry - to witness the first use of the "Large Hardon Collider". More soon.
</p>Svendo on "CERN To Start Work On Large Hadron Collander"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=6104#post-16706
Thu, 10 Jun 2010 15:14:42 +0000Svendo16706@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Physicists at CERN have decided that it's obviously too hard to try and get 2 protons to smash together so instead it has been proposed by leading boffin Prof. Stephen Hawking that instead of using a high energy beam to smash the particles together they will try and seive them out.<br />
Prof. Hawking has also proposed several other radical theories including:</p>
<p>Building a sofa out of charged particles and then looking for the elusive Higgs-Boson down the back of it;<br />
Shining a really, really, really bright light(like 3 times more powerful than the headlights on a ford mondeo) into space and any bits that are still dark are probably dark matter;<br />
Connecting his chair to the Internet via a 1980s modem, while adding pictures of models and a barbie doll into it's circuitry in an attempt to create Kelly Lebrock.</p>
<p>These latest theories have prompted some scientists to wonder whether Prof. Hawking has left the Wi-Fi on his chair unsecured and he has been hacked. This was made into a more feasible explanation after he called Richard Dawking a "noob" and then made a noise like "LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL".
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