Re: Helping a loved one who doesn't want help

Hi Shaz51, That's good you achieved something? Which is always good. I went for a walk with a close friend which was lovely but totally forgot it was her birthday! and now wondering whether to ring the hospital to see how my son is but some of me doesn't want to.🤔

Re: Helping a loved one who doesn't want help

to help a loved one who doesnot help, we need first try to understand her/his situation and she/he has to be in need the demand has to come but she/he may be afraid of requesting the need he/she wants. so, the first thing you have to know is men are like a ruber they streach away for some time and we need to understand that because they are staying away not because they hate us but they need some time alone. so in that case we need to surprise them in the morning when they wake up by cooking delicious food,radying their work close near by and to give them a kiss on forhead when they go to work and women has to look beautiful and attractive everytime they do not need to waive emotionally too.

Re: Helping a loved one who doesn't want help

Being true to yourself: It's important not to blame yourself for a loved one's choices, or even for behaviors they don't have a choice in. Don't make it all about you, but don't make it all about them either. Take care of yourself, don't ignore your own boundaries. No matter how unable they are to change, it doesn't mean they get to call the shots when your well-being is at stake. If you can stand your ground in a way that is safe for them, do so. Keep in mind that allowing someone to be a tyrant doesn't save them from anything, it only makes you both more miserable.

Be true to your loved one(s): Loving unconditionally can be very hard sometimes. If you are able to continue a relationship with an unwell loved one, work to take yourself out of the equation. Try to avoid occupying the bulk of your time with them nagging or waiting for an opportunity to force change. Your interactions with them may require some coffee talk. Think about what is important to them and talk about that when you feel tempted to push them towards seeking help yet again. People require your transparency. It allows them a safe space to be the best they can be.

If you need to, however, don't be afraid to distance yourself from them or cut them off entirely until they express an earnest desire to get better. Let them know, in a factual manner, why you won't be around as much, if at all. Tell them that when they are ready to change you'd be happy to help, but until then you must meet your own needs. Some people have to come to a decision themselves, no matter how dark things may get for them. Sometimes, as in my own case, people must hit rock bottom before they reach for the light, so to speak. One firm request for them to seek help may not have been as disregarded as you may believe. When and if they come to the decision themselves, they may have more of a chance of listening to you in the future, whether or not you ever know it.

If you need urgent assistance, see Need help now For mental health information, guidance and referrals, see the SANE Help CentreSANE Forums is published by SANE Australia with funding from the Australian Government Department of Health SANE Australia ABN 92006533606 PO Box 226 South Melbourne 3205 Australia