Monday, January 24, 2011

I’ve referred before to my loathing and Ryan’s loving of New Years Resolutions before. It’s caused problems in the past, but now we let each other be the goal-setters or non-goal-setters without interference.

This year, however, I needed some help. I’ve referred to my December somewhat obliquely over the last few posts, but, frankly, I’m suffering some mild depression. I might blog further about it, but for now, I’m admitting it just as a background for the post. I knew I had to make some behavior changes if I was going to feel better.

I wrote a list of things I wanted to improve on the week after Christmas. I think I had 38 things (no joke) on it. I knew that it was a)impossible b)discouraging to work on all of those things. I needed to figure out what few things would be the most effective in my life to work on. I knew I needed to talk to Heavenly Father about it, because He knows everything.

This is one of those times where I felt truly guided by the Spirit as I fasted and prayed over what should be my focuses in 2011. I’m grateful, as always, that I can access my loving Heavenly Father when I’m struggling and seeking help.

This is what I came up with:

1. I will not eat food that has sugar or corn syrup as one of the first three ingredients. I will eat 7 servings of fruits and vegetables a day.

2. I will find a quiet, extended period of time to pray and read my scriptures, listening to the Spirit and writing down my thoughts. That time, for me, is pre-workout. As in 4:45 in the a.m. (Yikes.)

3. I will not get on the computer/blogs/email until I’ve done the essential things in my day, which include prayer, scripture study and 10 minutes of positive alone time with each child. (I actually break this up into 3 kids in the morning—then computer, etc, during the day—then the last two kids after school, before I do anymore computering.)

4. I will focus being a better mom to my kids by implementing the Ways to Show Love found in this article by Rex A. Skidmore…ONE per month. (January is Showing Affection Through Touch.)

(Faith’s not hard to Show Affection to Through Touch, in case you were wondering)

It is going pretty well. I’m pretty disciplined and focused when I decide on something. #1 and #2 I’ve been practically perfect at, and it hasn’t even been that hard. #3 is definitely the biggest challenge when I walk around with a mini-computer in my back pocket all day, but as a good friend (Hi Sally) said recently “That computer is my Delilah…it saps my strength.” #4 has been pretty easy, once I got going. I’ve found that as I touch and show affection, I actually FEEL more affection (something I was struggling with, in consequence with the depression.)

I could talk about each of these for an entire post, and probably will at a later date, but I just wanted to get them down for posterity, accountability and out of gratitude to a Heavenly Father who is always to be found when I seek. (D&C 88:63)

Thursday, January 13, 2011

So I really enjoyed reading everyone’s year-ending/year-beginning posts: favorite books of 2010, picture recaps, favorite recipes or new goals. I want to do some of these posts…it’s not too late, right?

Top Ten Books of 2010:

…in no particular order. These are books that either made me want to read all day, or change myself in some way or caused me to think long after I was done. I don’t give synopses, because I like to be completely surprised when I read a book but I’ll give a little review for each.

1. Room by Emma Donoghue (adult fiction)

--genius writing about a horrible situation. Don’t be put off by the situation or the child’s-viewpoint writing…it’s well-done and is worth every nail you bite.

--aw, Faith. How would we be surviving without the wisdom of this book??

3. The Giver by Lois Lowry (children’s fiction)

--this is my 4th reading of this fabulous book. This time I read it to my kids and it was instructional, interesting, chilling, thought-provoking.

4. Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell (non-fiction)

--Probably my most quoted book of the year. It’s the book I bring up on dates with Ryan, in conversations at the dinner table, on runs with friends. Ryan says the author’s extrapolation with statistics was a little much…whatever, Mr. Engineer—I’m a believer.

5. The whole Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins (Young Adult Fiction)

--addicting, cannot-put-it-down fiction (with a good moral, too.)

6. Operating Instructions by Anne Lamott (memoir non-fiction)

--laugh out loud funny. It was refreshing to see myself and true goodness in someone completely unlike me.

7. Woman in White by Wilkie Collins (classic fiction)

--So fun to lose myself in a long, wordy tale of another time and culture. Very Dickensian.

8. The China Study by Thomas Campbell (educational non-fiction)

--I didn’t want to be convinced. I was.

9. Still Alice by Lisa Genova(adult fiction)

--The author knows her stuff. The emotions were true to life, the situation felt real. I actually cried during this one. It’s a book that makes you cherish your life.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

We went to a nativity/creche display that one of the LDS churches puts on here. It’s one of my favorite things and I was SO HAPPY that Gabe wanted to read every word of the brochure and go slowly through the displays. He was my buddy, willingly:

Meanwhile, Seth was dressing up as a cow and bowing to baby Jesus in the children’s section:

Some of us got more out the display than others.

This is the “Sunday Christmas Outfit Picture”. It’s only remarkable because, wait for it, this was the FIRST picture I took. As in: I took one picture and it was good and I didn’t have to take 276 more to get everyone to look at the camera. Christmas miracle.

And, even though I was admittedly grinchy and stressed out throughout much of December, here is evidence no one needs to call Child Protective Services:

We made and frosted Sugar Cookies

and made and decorated Gingerbread Houses.

(Although, whether adding MORE sugar to my diet made me a nice mom is definitely debatable.)

And here is Emma’s Christmas violin concert. Is it even possible to take a useful picture at a kid’s concert?!

This is when we went ice-skating walking. Meaning: Emma, Gabe and Jane skated around the rink, while Ryan and I hobbled, bent over, desperately trying to keep two peoples’ balance for an hour.

Ooh! Here’s a highlight! Ryan’s work put on a fabulous Christmas party—lake cruise, buffet dinner, fun dinner companions, fabulous prizes. And we won won of those fabulous prizes! THE LAPTOP I AM CURRENTLY TYPING ON! Yay, F5 Networks.

We completely finished decorating and organizing our basement and kids #4 and 5 play for hours in our art corner. Plus, it’s so cute.

Faith and I visited the elementary school for the class parties. Here are Jane and Faith and Gabe with his candy train:

And Gabe and his neighborhood buddies didn’t let a little snow slow them down when it comes to playing “Dominoes” on the trampoline.

And Seth got this ridiculous looking coat. Because I was frustrated with his zipper on the old coat and ripped it off. (See? bad mood all month.) Luckily Gap was having a %40 off sale and I had Gap Rewards and it was clearanced, so my temper only cost me $10 for the new coat. Plus he looks like he’s heading off to the Artic every time he puts it on…so it was pretty much worth it.

And we had the best New Years Eve ever. I’ll have to post sometime about the details of my Progressive Party. Kids and adults mingling without hardly any crazy, plus yummy food, plus funny games, plus actually staying up till midnight equals a truly awesome evening. (You’ll notice my kids aren’t in this picture. We sent them home to bed early around 10. Which made it even more fun…)

I’m glad we only take pictures of the happy and light-hearted. No pictures of certain wrapping paper throwing instances or venting conversations to Ryan that prompted Seth to admonish me “When Heavenly Father gets stressed out, I don’t think He says ‘Stupid’ that many times.” or the 20 pieces of fudge that entered my face.

That way in 10 years, we’ll all forget that December 2010 was hard and only remember, hopefully, that despite it all, we did some fun stuff.

We did a ridiculously irreverent Nativity Play and opened PJs and sang Happy Birthday to Jesus.

We love the easy-going familiarity and good spirit we feel when we’re with the Daines.

Christmas morning was early for us.

We’d bargained 6:00 am with Gabe and at 5:45 we got a knock on our door “Um. I know you said 6:00, but I thought you’d want time to comb hair and take pictures, so I thought I’d make sure you had 15 minutes.” Thanks, Gabe.

Seth won for Most Enthusiastic during present opening.

…especially when the whale/dolphin pillow pet made it’s appearance near the end. He was sweating that one. We finally got a Wii and though the big kids found out about it early (such a bummer to not get a Pay-off Reaction for such a begged for present!), it’s been the most popular present by a mile.

We spent the day playing games, watching movies, taking a chilly walk, doing puzzles.

I didn’t make any special Christmas meal on the 25th (I was tired of spending my holidays in the kitchen!), so I made our “fancy” meal the next day (Sunday).

I honestly couldn’t imagine that the grouchiness and stress of the first few weeks of the month would go away, but it did and paid off in a sweet, easy, blessed holiday with my favorite people in the world.

Quick Quote

Seth lost his shoes and had to wear Faith's too-small pair to a soccer game. He was pretty miserable. After the game, Ryan asked what he'd learned from it. Seth replied: "To have a happy attitude when things are hard?"