A modest attempt to share our new lives as the parents of twins

Helmets!

Our twins began wearing their helmets a few weeks ago and I’m happy to say that things are going really well.

elvis lip and all.

As mentioned previously, the babies needed helmets to fix their flat heads and to prevent any issues from creeping up later in life, like vision, nasal, or dental issues. Differences in the shape of their heads were noticed almost immediately, but we still have three months to go.

It was weird at first, but for reasons that we fully expected. Mostly staring.

Even though it’s 2015, and it’s becoming more common to see babies with helmets, there are a ton of people who have never seen a kid wear this kind of helmet. Or maybe they have, but they just can’t stop staring. We fully expected stares, gaping mouths, and whispers about the two goofs in the baby carriers wearing helmets, but it was easier to expect than to actually deal with.

Mom has witnessed it more than me, and to my surprise, she hasn’t yelled at a single person yet. She really is softening up! Sometimes she’ll return the stare, but that’s what any mother would do, right?

My favorite responses come from kids. They’re innocent and curious and they have zero filter. I can’t help but crack up when kids point and say “haha, them babies are wearing helmets!” It’s even better when they come right out and ask why the babies are wearing helmets, even though when I explain that they have flat heads, the kids think of the dude from minecraft.

The whole idea of helmets became much easier when we found out about Bling Your Band. It’s a great site that creates decals for baby helmets. Mom shared the site with me while I was at work and I couldn’t stop looking through all of the designs they had. And if you want something special, they have artists on hand to create custom designs! They also have a giant picture gallery that shows hundreds of other babies with their sweet helmet bling.

Honestly, if people are going to stare, let’s give them something to stare at. The designers for Bling Your Band were well aware of people gawking at kids who have to wear a helmet, and they have the perfect answer: acknowledge those who stare.

They’ve come up with clever decals that say:

“The Longer U Stare, The Cuter I Get”

“Keep looking… I know I’m cute”

“Whoo R U Staring at?” (with accompanying owls, of course)

And then there are several other funny designs that say things like “Under Construction”, “Just Fixin my Flat”, and “You should see the other guy”.

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em, right?

And that’s exactly what we did. Our kids have to wear helmets. 23 hours each day. For four months. We decided to make the most of it, so we got them some bling.

Griffin, the badass that he is, is no longer wearing a baby helmet. He is now sporting the helmet of a fighter pilot.

The decals were super easy to put on, and we put a coat of Mod Podge on the helmets to help protect the decals. We couldn’t be more pleased with the results. The helmets look awesome, and if the babies could thank us, they would. And I’m sure they’ll be sending a thank-you note to Bling Your Band in the next few days.

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We made the most of an unfortunate situation. Actually, we embraced it.

The kids’ heads are quickly rounding out. The before-and-after photos are striking, even though they’ve only been wearing the helmets for a few weeks. They don’t mind wearing the helmets at all. I don’t think they know they’re even wearing them.

Everyone at the grocery store sure knows that the babies are wearing helmets. But now, I’m okay with the staring.

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After Mom took the twins to the children’s hospital for their first helmet appointment, where she was offered some very candid comments, I wasn’t sure what to expect from their second baby helmet appointment. Will the helmet-fitter also tell us that Griffin has a “giant” head? Megg had spoken to her on the phone and told her about the warm reception she was given by the doctors, and the helmet-fitter said she was aware of this doctor’s choice of words. I like her already.

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We arrived at their facility on a frigid Saturday morning, There were just a few cars parked out front. I pictured families pulling up and getting out of their cars with their funky head-shaped babies. When we walked into the suite and found the waiting room full of baby toys, I knew they meant business.

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I put down Griffin’s carrier and took him out so he could play with the toys, or more likely than not, just lay on a mat and drool.

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As I was grabbing some toys for him to slobber on, Megg stopped me and told me not to let him touch the toys with hands or put anything in his mouth, which is basically all he is capable of doing at this age. So we sat there for a few minutes, looking at all of the toys, but not actually using them.

At one point, a mom came out of the helmet-fitting room to grab something from her double stroller. I figured she must have been a mom of twins, which is always a welcome sight, because it lets me see how others are getting along.

Is she too, wearing a shirt that has been spit up on twice today? How many diapers has she changed today? Are her kids sleeping through the night yet? These are the questions that run through my mind when I see another parent of twins. I always like to compare notes with them, but this mom in particular didn’t seem too friendly, so I didn’t really want to talk twin-strategy with her because I was afraid she’d bring me down.

The helmet-maker, Allison, came out of the room and was walking to another room, but suddenly stopped, pointed to Griffin and said, “Ooh, he’s got turtle colic hair.” Then she continued walking as if we had known that fact all along. I asked Megg what turtle colic was, and she told me that Allison had said torticollis, not turtle colic. She said it was a common issue with twins and it’s when they have a slouch in their posture and one of their shoulders sort of droops.

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Wow. The woman walked by us and just noticed this by the kid’s hair? She’s good.

Then our time in the office arrived.

We walked in and saw a fancy machine that looked sort of like a tanning bed with no lid. We talked to Allison and she told us the plan. The tanning bed machine would be used to take a scan of the babies’ heads and from there, she would identify the issues that needed to be addressed.

Megg brought up a study from the Netherlands that she found online, which said that helmets don’t actually fix anything, and Allison quickly debunked the study and explained the flaws in their clinical trials.

She already knew of this exact study and knew its shortcomings? She’s really good.

Griffin’s up first.

Allison put a stocking cap on his gargantuan, misshaped melon and he instantly looked cooler. We snapped some photos, like crazy parents do, and cracked some jokes. Thank God we have a doctor who can laugh at our kid with us.

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They put him in the tanning bed device and told us that he needs to stay still so they can get a clear image of his head. Well, Griffin hasn’t stayed still since he was taken out of Mom’s stomach, screaming with his hands held over his head. Allison put her hand over his face and held a rubber bear that lit up with all kinds of colors, and Griffin was instantly motionless. We need one of those bears.

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The image of his head came up on the computer screen and she pointed out all of the issues while explaining why each needed to be corrected. Apparently his face is a little “droopy”, which could cause vision, nasal, and dental problems down the road, but the helmets will fix all of those things. Woohoo!

Scout wasn’t as impressed with the magical bear, but an image was eventually taken of her head too, while sporting the stylish stocking cap.

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Allison said that her head was wider than Griffin’s and told us that the helmet will help fix her “Frankenstein” forehead. We hadn’t realized that her forehead protruded, but we were glad to hear that it would be fixed, and that she wouldn’t have to live the life of a girl cursed with a neanderthal face.

Helmets will be in soon and we’re making plans for some sweet helmet artwork!