Thank you all for your concern and prayers. We did the viewing today. The viewing was supposed to be private and we were originally expecting (or trying to limit it to) 20 people, but we got more like 40 when all was said and done. The extra people weren't an issue like I thought it might be, though, and everyone fit in the room ok. Many of Mary's family (Father's side) and many of my family (Father's side) are Roman Catholic, so they said the rosary. After a short interlude, we then had an Orthodox priest, Fr. John, say a prayer service for her, and he gave a short talk afterwards. I guess because we had not embalmed her, they didn't want the viewing to go on too long, so after that we just said our final goodbyes. We then had a little get together in the hall of the Methodist Church that Mary's grandmother attends, and the Church ladies cooked the food for us.

Thank you all for your concern and prayers. We did the viewing today. The viewing was supposed to be private and we were originally expecting (or trying to limit it to) 20 people, but we got more like 40 when all was said and done. The extra people weren't an issue like I thought it might be, though, and everyone fit in the room ok. Many of Mary's family (Father's side) and many of my family (Father's side) are Roman Catholic, so they said the rosary. After a short interlude, we then had an Orthodox priest, Fr. John, say a prayer service for her, and he gave a short talk afterwards. I guess because we had not embalmed her, they didn't want the viewing to go on too long, so after that we just said our final goodbyes. We then had a little get together in the hall of the Methodist Church that Mary's grandmother attends, and the Church ladies cooked the food for us.

If you don't mind me asking, did the girls attend?

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Question a friend, perhaps he did not do it; but if he did anything so that he may do it no more.A hasty quarrel kindles fire,and urgent strife sheds blood.If you blow on a spark, it will glow;if you spit on it, it will be put out; and both come out of your mouth

Yes, they did attend. We had a few conversations among various of the family about the pros and cons of children so young (3 and 4 1/2) attending their mother's funeral. In the end we felt that it would be best for them to at least have the chance of seeing their mother one last time. They were a bit confused/clingy, but that might have been because they were around so many people, and that there was crying and whatnot. When we held them close to Mary's body, they didn't seem to have any understanding of what was happening, and obviously we didn't try to be explicit about the situation. My older daughter, Athanasia, perhaps understood that something wasn't quite right, but she wasn't crying or fussing. My younger daughter, Sahara, was actually somewhat playful, talking about the flowers and pictures and whatnot close to the body.

Yes, they did attend. We had a few conversations among various of the family about the pros and cons of children so young (3 and 4 1/2) attending their mother's funeral. In the end we felt that it would be best for them to at least have the chance of seeing their mother one last time. They were a bit confused/clingy, but that might have been because they were around so many people, and that there was crying and whatnot. When we held them close to Mary's body, they didn't seem to have any understanding of what was happening, and obviously we didn't try to be explicit about the situation. My older daughter, Athanasia, perhaps understood that something wasn't quite right, but she wasn't crying or fussing. My younger daughter, Sahara, was actually somewhat playful, talking about the flowers and pictures and whatnot close to the body.

Good. Everyone I've know who were prevented in a similar situation grew up resentful about itl and never quite got resolution. I don't know anyone who went who was traumatized beyond the actual trauma of the facts: they seem to have used the viewing/funeral as a way to focus their disperate thoughts.

For what it's worth, I think you made the right choice.

Logged

Question a friend, perhaps he did not do it; but if he did anything so that he may do it no more.A hasty quarrel kindles fire,and urgent strife sheds blood.If you blow on a spark, it will glow;if you spit on it, it will be put out; and both come out of your mouth

Yes, they did attend. We had a few conversations among various of the family about the pros and cons of children so young (3 and 4 1/2) attending their mother's funeral. In the end we felt that it would be best for them to at least have the chance of seeing their mother one last time. They were a bit confused/clingy, but that might have been because they were around so many people, and that there was crying and whatnot. When we held them close to Mary's body, they didn't seem to have any understanding of what was happening, and obviously we didn't try to be explicit about the situation. My older daughter, Athanasia, perhaps understood that something wasn't quite right, but she wasn't crying or fussing. My younger daughter, Sahara, was actually somewhat playful, talking about the flowers and pictures and whatnot close to the body.

Good. Everyone I've know who were prevented in a similar situation grew up resentful about itl and never quite got resolution. I don't know anyone who went who was traumatized beyond the actual trauma of the facts: they seem to have used the viewing/funeral as a way to focus their disperate thoughts.

For what it's worth, I think you made the right choice.

Agreed!

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I would be happy to agree with you, but then both of us would be wrong.

I also agree. Thank you for sharing something so deep and personal with us. I only hope that our support is some consolation in this great time of loss. Even though or relationships online are somewhat abstract, I know now that they are real, because when I read about your daughters seeing her body, I began to well up with tears. In our own small way, we are hurting with you.

May Mary Cecilia's memory be eternal and may Justin, Athanasia, and Sahara be comforted in the thought that the Lord's handmaiden is in a place of light and love, where there is neither suffering nor sighing, but only life everlasting.

Justin, my condolences and prayers for you and the girls.

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"Not only is it unnecessary to adopt the customs of the Latin Rite to manifest one's Catholicism, it is an offense against the unity of the Church."

One year ago today. Not exactly a happy new year for me. They say holidays are the hardest, but it hasn't been overwhelmingly emotional. Dec. 8 was my daughter's 4th birthday, Dec. 22nd the anniversary of my chrismation in 2001 (yes, it matters enough to me to remember, strange as that may sound), Dec. 25th Christmas, Dec. 28th would have been our 8th wedding anniversary (had we made it that far), Jan. 1 new years... ahh well. I know it sounds corny and cliche, but take a moment to tell someone what you think of them, you never know when they'll be gone.

take a moment to tell someone what you think of them, you never know when they'll be gone.

On this, her first annversary of repose, may Mary Cecilia's memory be eternal and may the Mother of Our Savior, the Holy Theotokos, continue to hold Athanasia, and Sahara close. Lord, give comfort to Justin in his memories of times past and in his expectation of times to come.

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"Not only is it unnecessary to adopt the customs of the Latin Rite to manifest one's Catholicism, it is an offense against the unity of the Church."

"O Cross of Christ, all-holy, thrice-blessed, and life-giving, instrument of the mystical rites of Zion, the holy Altar for the service of our Great Archpriest, the blessing - the weapon - the strength of priests, our pride, our consolation, the light in our hearts, our mind, and our steps"Met. Meletios of Nikopolis & Preveza, from his ordination.

Thanks for being here, for me, and I'm sure for others. I guess it's strange saying that about a bunch of people most of whom I've never met. There for me you were nonetheless. I'm sorry for any confusion or annoyance I caused. I will try to message a couple of you tomorrow if I don't post anymore tonight. Later.