One of the disadvantages of allowing comments on a blog is that you immediately become a target for spammers and others who are trying to build up a volume of links to improve the search engine rating for their own site. Now if they made some relevant or appropriate comment not only might you overlook their objective when moderating their comment, but indeed you might not even notice. But almost invariably they just make some boilerplate comment (even to the point of leaving in boilerplate variable placeholders sometimes!). Given the nature of our blog (i.e. to provide information relating to our authors and their titles) most of these bog-standard comments are so far from being even vaguely relevant as to be laughable. At least that makes the job of moderating much simpler!

So far, the comments largely fall into four categories:

1. Stroking. Complimentary comments that are non-specific and are intended to appeal to the blogger’s ego (“Great post. I come back here regularly. I don’t understand why you’re not a famous blogger” etc…)

2. Poking. Uncomplimentary comments that are also non-specific but seem to be intended to generate a response (“I used to read your blog every day but the recent posts aren’t so good. What’s up dude?” and so on.)

3. Provoking. Questions or statements about the mechanics of the blog that are also intended to generate a response (“Hey dude, did you know your text disappears off the page in Chrome?” “Some of the pictures aren’t loading in my browser.” or even “I couldn’t find a way to submit comments” – my favourite )

4. Cloaking. Comments that aren’t even trying to be intelligible. Some appear to be randomly generated gibberish, many of which are clearly from sources that don’t speak English and have found a very strangely populated dictionary/thesaurus. (“This sounds sort of agitative pending me…can’t watch this…thank you!” “That is former groovy advice! ego be acquainted with he.”)

However there is a fifth category which cuts across all of them and I wanted to share some of those here. I call that category:

5. Joking. These are comments that are trying to be in one of the four categories above but are so laughable that they deserve their own. Some are such complete gibberish that they make you laugh out loud:

“That is former ducky advice! alter ego be apprised of oneself. Though her beholder been in loyalty facing 9 period (yet the senility upon 15) him haven’t displeasing up to truck developer rainy day beside one psychological time inner man am fixer turn enterpriser.”

“Thank you! It is tenderly until finger alone equal fixer burden beneficiary, essentially now…he strength of mind comport ducky until container this community at large before apportion abbreviate find but.”

“I do not understand how cloud’s are formed, however the clouds do, and that is the essential thing.”

“That is former groovy advice! ego be acquainted with he. Though alter keeper been goodwill ethics for 9 years (thus far the senility speaking of 15) himself haven’t punk till deal with a recession excluding partnered chronology alter am framer bit enterpriser.”

“I petulance your blog. This is brief what I sharp been looking for. Get obvious, and I contentment ridiculous reel back. cant you can fastening bravery my pcb assembly blog too. Odious my English backside no good. Sorry, me English sucks I know.”