On The Cusp

21st April, 2017

Often-times the most discordant parts of any change-effort are those moments when you are “on the cusp” of something critical… those times where you simply know that making small (or vast) course adjustments is required to significantly progress… These times can occur at any point of a project and they are also the times where doubt, fear and inertia can creep in and we can become distracted and knocked off course by “emotional squirliness”

It could be that the cusp you are on is one of finding the navigation points and whilst you have threads of direction, there is resistance in “knowing” from “somewhere” (within you) or a grasping impatience within you that creates noise on the line reducing the potential for clarity to emerge.

It could be that you know the navigation points and yet you are being blocked from “action” by “something” (within you), or you are deliberately ignoring clear signals to act.

Perhaps you perceive external forces are conspiring to hold you back and you are somehow questioning your resolve to move through this moment.

It is confusing, of course, because you are clear that you are onto something important, awesome, epic or even legendary, but it just seems so tough to move forwards and surely if it is the right cause… it shouldn’t be this difficult… should it?

Well… there are paradoxes in play…

The exhilaration of achievement, we know, is built upon struggle and likewise to increase our levels of freedom, requires us to let go. Sometimes the path is convoluted and it can appear that we are moving backwards.

Loss / gain… risk / reward… ignorance / learning… Contrast is a fluid-constant in our analogue world and to become more collectively enlightened suggests a valid existence of darkness and opacity.

When we are impassioned we are also compelled and if we fail to remain enthused, our actions can feel forced and restrictive. Moral imperatives that make a positive difference contain a distinct lack of certainty, an abundance of unknowns and are seldom likely to be effortless… and yet whilst we are questioning we are growing and it is within growth that we individually and collectively flourish – Jason Silva has a great Shots of Awe film about being a Seeker… celebrating “unknowing” to never let go of what beckons us.

If your cause truly starts with love, hold on to hope and an awareness that it is within you to do something positive – a great blog from my Ocean Advocate friend Liz Cunningham likens true love to true hope and her book shares an example of survival against the odds.

By retaining our passion and compassion for the path that we have chosen we remain active in knowing that we CAN move forwards… everything else is simply a choice. Not always, but often where we take the path of least resistance, we can fall into unhealthy patterns. The hardest parts of any meaningful shift are ironically the most pivotal moments – and as such they are times to be celebrated.

Does it feel scary – great – it must be important. Are you mentally and physically challenged… awesome – it is worth your attention then. Are you at the edge of your current perceived limitations – amazing – the very next step forward will transcend your boundaries.

“I was just about to give up when”…. How often have you heard this during an inspiring tale of a meaningful quest? I would bet this storyline exists within EVERY significant achievement. It is in our darkest hours that we see cracks of light emerging and it is within our will to act upon these.

So… you find yourself in a funk, but your cause is true… Will you give up and walk away or will you paddle out and surf through?

Explore your thoughts for a moment:

What do you think about how things are in this moment?

How are you imagining things will progress?

See your thoughts for what they are:

What do you think about the way that you are thinking in relation to the two questions above?

How helpful is the thinking you have been applying to the situation you find yourself within?

What if you could change your thoughts?

Create and own new thoughts:

What new thinking will enable you to act in new ways?

Where and when will you place your attention?

What are the big decisions to be made?

Notice your feelings:

How are you feeling about how things are in this moment?

Where in your body are these feelings and what qualities do the feelings have?

Explore these feelings:

How do you feel about the way you are feeling in relation to the situation you find yourself within?

What metaphors describe the visceral manifestation of your emotions?

What happens if you change your descriptive language relating to your feelings?

Connect with your purpose:

What needs to change in the way you are feeling?

What is needed to allow yourself to make this change?

Who or what can support you?

Ask yourself:

What are you really passionate about – revisit “why” you embarked upon this journey and check in with your heart to reconnect with your purpose.

So, what are you waiting for?

About Lizzi Larbalestier

Professional executive coach, mBIT and NLP trainer specialising in coastal coaching. Creating meaningful conversations, facilitating action and change for the results that you deserve. #coherentleadership #bluemind