Marriage gets helping hand from glossy guide

Marriage is à la mode, according to the style bibles and fashionistas, with the likes of Brad and Jennifer, Jules and Jamie and Zoe and Norman - aka Fat Boy Slim - leading the way.

But with two out of five British marriages ending in divorce, and four out of 10 being remarriages, the new enthusiasm barely disguises the impression that the institution is in trouble.

Now, however, help could be on the way in the form of a government-funded magazine. The glossy publication, Married Life: a rough guide for couples today, will be distributed free to more than 250,000 couples by the Church of England and register offices.

The guide, produced by the charities One Plus One and the National Family and Parenting Institute, and the Church of England, came about after research showed that engaged couples wanted more guidance on what they were letting themselves in for, and was spurred by a recommendation in the 1998 green paper Supporting Families that registrars and vicars should provide prenuptial counselling and couples should be given a "statement of rights and responsibilities".

The government contributed £27,000 to the publication, but the lion's share of the £270,000 costs have been borne by its publishers, Lifecycle Marketing Ltd. The magazine is punctuated by advertisements for Argos, the jeweller H Samuel, wedding insurance and Wedding and Home magazine.

Written for every kind of wedding, secular or religious, the 72 page glossy encourages couples to think about the most contentious issues, including housework, money and children, before they marry.

It purports to offer information rather than advice, though it does encourage couples to "have a sense of humour", "set aside time for each other" and "write problems down" as means of easing difficulties.

Alongside details of the weddings of celebrities such as Kate Winslet and Jamie Oliver, and the concerns of ordinary couples, it offers practical advice on involving children in weddings and on prenuptial agreements, as well as highlighting the health benefits of marriage - apparently it makes you less likely to develop cancer.

A 50 point quiz helps couples to assess whether they really know each other.

Penny Mansfield, director of One Plus One, said the magazine was aimed at helping couples to "identifying the issues which may lie ahead of them". She denied that it was patronising, since research showed that couples requested it.

More than 300,000 couple get married each year, down by 100,000 on the figure 20 years ago

"I do think this can help, but I'm not Pollyanna-ish about it," Ms Mansfield added. "I think the level of marriage breakdown is a feature of modern life, but because we now have the freedom to leave marriages that don't work it's hard to decide if this is a bad time in a marriage or a bad marraige. Hopefully [the magazine] will help couples to make that assessment."

But Robert Whelan, deputy director of the social policy think tank Civitas, criticised much of the advice as being too "obvious".

"People would have learned about marriage from their brothers and sisters and from their friends and the churches," he said.

"The problem now is that the institution of marriage is in steady decline and that people don't have very much experience of good working marriages by the time they come to get married."

How well do you know your partner?

Your partner's family

What is your partner's mother's maiden name?

When is his/her birthday?

Where was your partner's maternal grandmother (mother's mother) born?

What is your partner's father's favourite hobby or pastime?

Do your partner's parents have any religious beliefs?

How does he/she get on with his family?

Personal details

Name one of his/her childhood friends

Has your partner ever had a serious illness?

Does your partner have a phobia?

If your partner works, what does he/she earn?

Who most irritates him/her at work?

Likes and dislikes

What is your partner's favourite meal?

What food do they hate most?

What country would your partner most like to visit?

What kind of holiday is his/her ideal?

What two records would your partner take if invited on to Desert Island Discs?

What newspaper do they prefer to read?

What colour(s) do they like?

And hate?

What TV programme would they try never to miss?

Character quirks

What is the thing which your partner would like to change in you?

What does he/she like about you?

What really annoys him/her about you?

What does he/she worry about?

Beliefs and attitudes

How did he/she vote in the last general election?

Does he/she believe in God?

In the case of serious illness, would your partner want to be kept alive at all costs?

In the event of sudden death, would he/she like to donate organs?

Are traditions/rituals important to him/her?

Home, children, the future

Does he/she want children, and if yes, when?

Does he/she think smacking children, is ever acceptable?

If you do not have children, will that be a problem for him/her?

What is he/she hoping the future will bring?

What would your partner like to do when they retire?

How important to your partner is (rate importance as: Very, Fairly, Not very, or Not at all):