I Blame Hormones for This.

This is Tari’s last day at office.
Tari is my co-worker, we’ve been for like more than a year together.
At the time she would like say bye-bye to me, all I really want to do was hug her.
I thank her for soooo many reasons:
– she’s a super cheerful person I’ve ever met.
– she is also super talented for her design.
– her style is never die.
– a very good listener and speaker.
– we’re like having the same taste for design, yet different for boyfriend type.
– she is sometime very childish, and I hate it.
– it is very impressive that by the time she turned 21, she already got everything; super rich+handsome boyfriend who also her husband to be, her own bussiness, and well-prepared personality in any condition.
– and yeah, by bussiness I mean she also get rich from that.
– how do I know? She’s the one who lend me money whenever I broke.
– with her, I could tell anything, and by anything also my family is included.
– she has a very strong willingness to learn about new things.
– and many more reasons that I admire from her.

But I didn’t hug her.
Because:
– I always delayed whenever she want to say goodbye to me.
– when it turns out for the time, I am really not prepared for the crying.
– I have just arrived at office after did last job at factory.
– I sat on my motorcycle, with hardly catch my breath.
– she stopped me and said that she wanna say bye bye at that time, even I keep delayed her.
– her boyfriend was already waited and picked her up in front of office.
– time was running out and it was 3.00 pm, when we should go home at 2.30 pm.

My sad mood haven’t been set at that time, and now I cursed myself for that.
All we did just a very polite, calm, and formal handshake.
She kept tellin me to visited and met her anytime I need to.
(Sweetie, I promised myself I will.)

You know, I still want to discuss more about our dream and planned weddings.
I still want you to be the one who design my wed invitation, also give me your opinion about which souvenir should I take.
I still want to talk about sex education, your ‘special’ friend, and many more adult conversations.
I still want to gossip with you about each person at office.
I still need your time and ear to hear about my complicated problem here.
I still want to be disturbed by you every morning when you want to absent work.

But I can’t hold you anymore.

Not even Mr. Bosses, they also could not keep you at office anymore.

No, this is not my first time being left with my co-worker; it’s just my hormones who make me said things like this.

First time my co-workers, Neni, leave me; I didn’t sad at all. I already have Fitri for replace her.

Then Fitri decided to leave, my heart broke a little.
We’ve been friends since in College.
Also housemates for like 3-4 years.
Came from a same race.
She also has many beautiful and sweet things like you.
But I’ve gotta move on; she leave for good.

Then people came and go at my working room.

Til finally you came fill that empty space.

I never thought I would be this ‘strong’ with you.
You, came know nothing but my main job.
Maybe it will never cross your mind to learn about exporting documents.
But hey, you did it.
You did amazing jobs for that.
And I will never stop saying thank you for that.

Sweetie, whatever your plan, wherever you wanna go, whoever you worked with, I would like you to keep this in your mind:
“Never limit yourself, keep going on cause nobody could stop you. Keep inspiring people, be bright just like your name.”

Sincerely yours,

Your left co-worker who in her dismenorrhea and all the PMS things and being very mellow at this day, sensitive for everything, that will always missing you.