Smoky
gray haze journeyed through the kitchen. Ryoga tried to keep himself as busy
as possible as he waved the gray wisps away with his hand. The mixed mysterious
scents of garlic, vinegar and warm yellow onion sizzled on the stove. Ryoga
then added some wilted jade green spinach. In another pan, bacon sizzled and
oil danced for joy on the heathen pan.

As
the crepe came into completion, something went horribly wrong. As Ryoga flipped
the crepe over, there was a miniscule lump of uncooked dough. The uncooked
dough caused the crepe to fall apart as Ryoga flipped the crepe over and the
spinach dripped out into a crepe filled mess. Ryoga cussed quietly and angrily
and scooped the messed up crepe into a small box. It would become his lunch.

Ryoga was not having a very
good day.

He recalled Tyler walking in
and telling him teary-eyed that nothing happened between him and Ryan that
night. However, his attraction to Ryan made him realize that he was still
into Ryan and therefore had to think about what he really wanted before he
could cater to his new boyfriend. Well, now his ex-boyfriend.

Ryoga brought himself back
to the present and smelled that his new crepe was slightly burnt. But that
was okay. At least it was complete.

Ryoga walked out to the table.
He was amazed that customers came so early for a lunch crepe. But this wasn’t
a regular encounter. He looked up at the table and there he was sitting with
his legs crossed, arms folded.

It was Barry.

Ryoga put the plate down and
murmured. "One Florentine to go." He started to turn away when he
heard the gruff, "Wait."

"I'm not going to tell
you how I found out or who I found out from," Barry said. "But I
just wanted to know if you're all right."

Starbucks
Coffee was another store that opened early on these dreary Monday mornings.
The friendly pale hues of soft lighting made this coffee casbah a peaceful
environment for meditation and relaxation. Ryoga and Barry sat on wire chairs
across of each other in the small veranda outside. This veranda, when used
properly, was a perfect place to cruise certain strollers.

The crisp wind blew through the street and onto their
cool backs.

"Are you okay?" Barry
asked gruffly as he poured some more sugar into his coffee cup.

Ryoga shaked as he sipped his
cafe mocha. The hot liquid touched his lips like tiny aftershocks repeating
over and over. The burning concoction sizzled down his tongue leaving no taste.
"No," he replied.

"Ryan and Tyler have been
through so much together," Barry said. "There's a history there
that we know very little of between those two. I wouldn't recommend getting
into their little cycle."

Ryoga shook his head. "Normally,
when these things happen I can just run away from it," Ryoga smilled.
"Sometimes I'm in the forests of Hokkaido. I know Japan from the back
of my head. But America is a completely different story. "

"You could get lost forever
here," Barry said. "Japan is pretty small compared to America.

"

The silence envoloped them.
Drops ofcoffee fell painfully in the background into a steaming pot. Another
hiss called the completion of the perfect cafe mocha. The lights tinkered
underneah Ryoga and Barry. A clock ticked slowly.

“Why
do you keep on running?” Barry asked.

Ryoga
touched his cup lightly. “Because I think that if I run fast enough, I could
just disappear,” Ryoga said.

“Listen,”
Barry said smugly. “I’m not going to take your crap. Because I’ve heard it
way too often. Each year, I see thousands of young men like you come to this
city flocking to this city like it is Mecca, looking for love and success
only to face disappointment, shame, heartbreak, betrayal. I've seen them fall
through the cracks.”

“So what do I do?” Ryoga asked.

"Are you going to run
away again?" Barry asked.

"I don't want to run away,"
Ryoga said quietly. "I don't want to run away anymore."

"Then stay," Barry
said. "No one is asking you to leave."

Ryoga looked shocked. Of all
the people, Barry wanted him to stay. Barry, the one who criticized Ryan for
robbing the cradle.

"I don't know how,"
Ryoga looked quietly back at his mug.

"It's really easy,"
Barry said. "First off, you have to decide that you want to stay. You
have to tell yourself 'I'm not going to run away this time.' And then you
don't. You face life head on just like everyone else."

Ryoga nodded softly.

"You're gonna be alright,"
Barry said. "I need to go to work. Right now, you need to decide. Do
you keep on running and getting lost in this chasm known as life? The choice
is up to you."

The
new day was only starting.
The streets of Castro and Market started to litter with people heading for
work, heading for tricks, heading for whatever they had to face that day.
Storeowners slowly turned their signs to open. Cell phones started ringing.
Voices started calling to the sun and to each other. Ryoga soaked up the happiness,
the feeling of being alive. It was a feeling like he never felt before. A
quiet exhale. And he turned to go to work.