Lyrics

The Best Way

sample: [Just keep punching, that's the thing to do.
Remember the words of the philosopher Ken Morgester, who once
said "Failure is not falling down, failure is staying down".
And that's a good thought for this day, or any day. Say, did
you ever grab a wishbone and wish that the chicken you had
just served had been tastier? Well that won't happen with
Waybest chicken. Waybest is so superb you serve it
with no regrets, no apologies. When you take a Waybest
chicken from the oven golden-brown and mouth-watering to look
at, you know it will delight everybody at the table.]

Down on the farm, where the chicken is.
Stuff 'em full of fishmeal, stick 'em in a box
Chop their silly heads off, watch 'em run around
You take out the feathers, throw away the beak
Put them in the freezer for a couple of weeks
And you cook 'em in an oven and you stick 'em on a plate
And you slaver and you wriggle and you say
"it looks great"
You make 'em into gravy, get it on your face
It's a shame and it's a disgrace
They eat chicken in the Balkans, chicken in Rome
I bet you even like to eat chicken at home
Chicken in Bolivia, chicken in Peru
I bet eating chicken is a thing you like to do
They get chicken in the Balkans, chicken in Rome
I bet you even like to eat chicken at home
There's chicken in Bolivia, chicken in Peru
Chicken in Kiev's a thing you shouldn't oughtta do
And there's chicken, McChicken, anywhere at all
And chicken's an atrocity, it's vile that's all
There's chicken in Detroit, in Washington Square
Chicken in the high street, chicken everywhere
Chicken on holiday, chicken in jail
Wake up in the morning, there's a chicken in the mail
There's chicken on holiday, chicken in jail
The cats get chicken from the garbage pail
You raise 'em, race 'em, misplace 'em, replace 'em,
You can boil it, or baste it,
Just make sure that you waste it
sample: [No regrets, no apologies... Just keep punching]
Prize turkeys!
I want to see the man in charge!
sample: [Just keep punching]
sample: [I don't want to kill 'em, I want the money]
sample: [No regrets, no apologies]
sample: [I'm hypnotized]
sample: [I don't want to kill 'em, I want the money]
Which came first the chicken or the egg?
They get so damn crazy they eat their own legs (x6)
Stuff 'em full of fishmeal, put 'em on the table
Make 'em into gravy, get it on your shirt front (x3)
It's disgusting!
There's chicken on your shirt front, greasy and thick
Someone tell the manager the chicken is sick
The whole idea is sick. Have another drumstick.
Chicken in the basket is the ladies' pick
Sick!
Chicken in Camden, Paddington too
They even got chicken in the Regent Park Zoo
There's chicken in China, chicken in Nepal
Chicken over there dead hanging on the wall
There's chicken in Syria, Daar-es-Salaam
The whole population wants to do them harm
There's chicken in Dublin
Chicken in Spain
Chicken in the slaughterhouse
Chicken in the rain
There's chicken in the library and on TV
World-wide symbol of stupidity
But if you ask me, they never had the chance to start with.
Prize turkey's delight! (x2)

Sung to the tune of the 60's/70's TV advert
for "Fry's Turkish Delight", as it goes.

Now this is how you get a chicken hypnotized
You look the little motherfucker right in the eyes and say
"Chicken, you will obey"
Ah, they're laughing at the chickens, I can see them
*A mess of samples and scattered words*

Found On

Having ended up on Creation Records, which I took as a bit of a validation, I was keen to get as far away from all those "w" words that had followed my group around. The sessions were chaotic and funny. What disappoints me is that it came out sounding so SMOOTH and tidy. But I like Fishcotheque; I wish there more records as good as it.

So you've got a CD player, have you? I've got a headache and an abiding dislike of expensive food crews in dumb baseball hats. I've been in Edward's Closet and he wasnt't in. "That JBC", they mutter at the bus-stop, "turned left at the light a Long Time Ago".

Thanks for the money. We'll be spending it on weapons and drugs. The first thing that you have to understand about this disc is that it is not an L.P.: it is a single and a radio session nailed together for your amusement.

Insight

The Butcher Says..

"Edgar Wallace" means "serious" in surrealist rhyming slang, which is a good way to describe the toothache I had when O'Higgins and I did this mix. Odd barnyard noises may be blamed on the aforementioned The Perfect Disaster, who got in there somewhere.

A rap which originally appeared on the indisposible Fishcotheque L.P. This version, specifically aimed at Italian discotheques, was set down through a haze of paracetemol, codeine & Red Stripe Lager in defiance of the most apalling toothache known to mankind, May '88 model. My thanks to the revolting O'Higgins for some serious mix magick. Linguistic note: "Edgar Wallace" is surrealist rhyming slang for "serious."

the Best Way
purplevioletsquishies[at]-remove-comcast.net
- Salem, OR USA
18Jan2005 2:37 AM
(13 years 37 days ago)

Somehow I get the distinct impression EVERY song done by Jazz Butcher is a good one. I only had exposure to their Distressed Gentlefolk album, Fishcoteque album & their Bloody Nonsense album in the 80's & early 90's. But I've sampled quite a few more of their songs on this site & they were all "bloody" good. I agree a thousand times (or more) with some of the comments posted by others on this site... the Jazz Butcher should make their old songs available again on artist friendly sites so one can at least pay $1.00 per song download to get whatever song of the Jazz Butcher they have been forced for so long to live without. I had the 3 above albums but was short sighted enough to part with them... along with a great song by William Tucker from the Swinging Pistons (who used to be in Ministry) who is now dead & you can't find his album anywhere. It'd be nice if the song he did before he died could be purchased & downloaded on an artist friendly site as well. He did the song "(Ever Since I Was Young), I Liked the Sound Of Machines. When a person cannot get a song like this on eBay or find it anywhere on the web... then things have reached "critical mass."

I've always wondered if the sampled voice at the beginning of Chickentown was Hartford Ct. radio and tv legend Bob Steele? He was on WTIC Radio and TV for many years, and has only recently retired. Just wondering.

Enjoy your music and your fertile imagination. When one buys a Jazz Butcher "album" one never knows what to expect, other than it will be interesting.