Started with a teenager's journey through high school, morphed into a young adult's experiences in college. Now college is over (for the most part) and we've turned to other adventures. Join us in the excitement.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Welcome to MSN MessengerOnline ContactsStop take some time to think...DanoM.T.dimoAugerric...Sinister Cynicism

This is who I want to talk to. Double click. "Hey". "Meebo message: Sinister Cynicism is offline". This happens EVERY TIME, and yet he says he isn't avoiding me. He's full of shit. We broke up because I wished he loved me. Is that so wrong? He couldn't give me what I wanted, and he couldn't deal with that. Is that really so hard to deal with? I write an email, asking him how he's doing. No response. I write another, telling him about how I'm doing, that I got Firefly for my birthday. Still, no response. And then, a final email, telling him how I'm doing, and telling him I'm done with our one-sided friendship. And, you guessed it, no response! He had told me, in an email, that he wanted to be friends, that he wanted "to keep things from going awkward and silent, if he could". Guess that's no longer the case. Maybe I just freaked out about his flirting a little too much. Couldn't handle seeing his arm around another girl, so I left. And he calls that freaking out. I didn't even yell... I didn't even say anything... I said goodbye to everyone, and I left. It's my party, I can cry/leave if I want to. Even my friends are telling me I should give up on friendship with him. Fine. You win P.V... I give up. I give up, I give up. B.P. told me she thought I had a chance of getting him back. Not so much when he doesn't co-operate with our plans. But it doesn't matter anymore. As an ex, I'm not supposed to care, so I don't. And then I do. And then I don't. And then I do, but I claim I don't. So I delete the crappy camera-phone pictures of him from my cell phone, I delete his phone number, knowing I can get it back from facebook if I need it, I delete him from my MSN and AIM accounts. I try to stop caring. He probably has me blocked anyway. Oh well. This is me not caring, or rather, me trying not to care...

0
comments:

About Me

I have blonde hair and blue eyes, I'm about 5' 2" and I have quite a high IQ (except for the lack of common sense at certain times). As you can probably see from my blog, my life consists of high highs and low lows. There is no happy medium for my moods. I just graduated from a small, private, liberal arts college and I might be going back for law school. I want to someday be a prosecuter, a mediator, a family law attorney, or a counselor. Sometimes I feel crazy, bipolar, and that is where the inspiration for this blog comes. I enjoy having the sand between my toes and snowflakes in my hair (not at the same time, of course!). Oh yeah, I almost forgot... I'm also looking for my mind and life's purpose; I seemed to have lost mine.