The Unplan – OMG What have I done?

I’ve been planning the steps to get debt free officially for four months and unofficially tossing around the idea for 8 months to a year.

Here I am less than three weeks away from my debt-free plan coming to fruition and I think I’m losing my mind.

OMG – less than three weeks!!!!

Luckily, I think it is a normal freak out. If you were all of a sudden about to have no commitments, no debts … wouldn’t you freak out a little too?

I don’t have kids, but I liken this to being a mom or dad who has been planning for a couple of months for the grandparents to take the kids for a week … then that week approaches and panic sets in. ‘OMG what do I do without my kids?’

Well … that’s kind of the feeling I have right now … I am excited for financial freedom. Being debt free is something not too many people can lay claim to. However, I’m doing so by choice. I am excited to be able to design my life and choose where I want to go next. On the other hand, having no fixed address and an overwhelming number of options for what to do with my life leaves me sometimes nearly paralyzed with fear. I’ve learned when there are too many thoughts in my brain, a few things happen …

1. I get frustrated which can lead to me crying (yes, I’m a girl. And yes, I cry out of frustration – deal with it! I’ve learned to accept it)
2. I get sleepy (apparently if your brain is in overdrive, you use a lot of energy!)

My mind is racing with all of the things I have to do in order to move (purging & selling items, changing address, finding a post office box and a storage unit, physically moving, packing & unpacking, changing insurance policies, disconnecting power / internet etc). All the while, continuing to keep my photography and travel businesses running so that I can make money to live. After all, being debt free doesn’t mean being rich or having no bills. It simply means I will have no debts hanging over my head. It means living more simply with a goal in mind to keep me on track.

And, now that being debt free is within reach (week! I can’t believe I’m saying that!) I’ve started day dreaming about the possibilities for what my fall travel will look like. Of course, this is the fun part, but it can be totally overwhelming too.

Pssst … I’m not sure if you know this, but there is a whole world out there waiting for you to discover it!

Trying to decide where to start, what to see and what to leave out is kind of a big deal for me. And, trying to balance that with the fact that I do not want to be constantly on the move. I want to settle down for a few weeks in a couple of yet to be determined places so that I can really get a feel for that area, as well as being able to continue working as a travel agent remotely.

I know for the many of you out there who are living vicariously through me and those who are incredibly excited for this journey of mine, you read all of this and say ‘you go girl’ and ‘that’s so exciting’. You are right. All of this is very exciting, but please don’t forget that it is also incredibly overwhelming. At this point I go through daily moments where I think ‘OMG what have I done?’ Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t take any of it back, and in fact, if I wanted to, I could kibosh the entire traveling plan, but I’m not. The ‘what have I done?’ is just me being overwhelmed with all that I’ve accomplished and all the lies ahead of me. Not in a bad way, just in a way that most people don’t understand because they’ve never set a plan in place to get debt free and travel.

Sure, I am by far not the first person to do this! But, I bet for most of you I’m the first person you know who is doing this! And quite honestly, it often happens before starting your life and career or after your kids graduate and you retire. Of the small percentage of the people in the world who sell everything and go travel, I’m the even smaller percent who is doing it in the middle of my career, before I have children and long before I retire.

Brave? Yes.
Stupid? hmmm … I sure hope not.
Will I regret it? Not a chance.