Wednesday, December 17, 2014

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. "You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, Mary, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."He turned to the second Mom, Ann: "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."He turned to the third Mom, Joyce: "Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy."At
this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little
boy by the hand, and whispered, "Come on, Dick, this guy has no idea
what he's talking about. Let's pick up Peter and Willy from school and
go get dinner."﻿

Monday, September 29, 2014

When I was a little girl, I remember that when my dad was repairing
something, every time he asked me to hold the hammer, just so we would
have a time for
a conversation with each other. I never saw my dad drinking or taking a
„night out with the boys“, all he did after work was taking care of his
family.

I grew up and left home for college and since then, my dad had been
calling me every Sunday morning, no matter what. And when several years
later I bought a
house, my dad was painting it by himself for three days in the 80-degree
summer heat. All he asked, was to hold his paint brush and talk to him.
But I was too
busy in those days, I did not find any time for a conversation with my
dad.

Four years ago, my dad was visiting me. He spent many hours putting
together a swingset for my daughter. He asked to bring him a cup of tea
and have a talk with
him, but I had to prepare for a trip that weekend, so I did not have
time for any long conversations that day.

One Sunday morning we had a telephone talk as usual, I noticed that my
dad had forgotten some things that we discussed lately. I was in a
hurry, so our
conversation was short. Few hours later that day came a call. My father
was in a hospital with an aneurysm. Immediately I bought ticket for a
flight and
on my way I was thinking about all missed occasions to have a talk with
my dad.

By the time I have arrived to hospital, my father had passed away. Now
it was he who did not have time for a conversation with me. I realized
how little I
knew about my dad, his deepest thoughts and dreams.

After his death I learned much more about him, and even more about
myself. All he ever asked me was my time. And now his has all my
attention every single day.

Monday, June 9, 2014

Here we are, afraid of losing what we have all the time, holding on
to it so tight that not a soul can touch it. We think by hiding it from
the world, it’s hidden and it’s ours. Nothing is. Nothing ever will be.
For, nothing ever was.

If you think there is anything that you
have, that’s yours, be it money, a house, a job, or a girlfriend… it’s
nothing but an illusion. It’ll all disappear… in one blow. One blow, my
man.Here we are, so insecure that we are afraid of re-starting
our lives, so we just carry on trying to sort out the current mess. The
thought that we should give it all up and just start all over – with
nothing – might cross our minds some time, sure, but we get scared and
we push away anything that scares us.There is nothing I can ever
achieve or gain that I cannot lose, in a matter of seconds. You have
never gained enough to not be able to lose it all, in just a few
minutes. What you think is yours, was never yours and will never be
yours. Whatever you make here, you leave here. You came naked and you’re
going to go back naked.

So what are you afraid of?Let all
be lost. Let them take away everything. As long as you have your heart
beating strong, as long as you have your nostrils working fine, as long
as the blood flows in your veins, you will live, you will breathe and
you can get it all back…

again and again. For, if you can do it once,
you can damn well do it again. It’s just a game we play – Life.

Sunday, June 8, 2014

One day, a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to
the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people
live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would
be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip, the
father asked his son, “How was the trip?”“It was great, Dad.”“Did you see how poor people live?” the father asked.“Oh yeah,” said the son.“So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?” asked the father.

The
son answered, “I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a
pool that reaches to the middle of our garden, and they have a creek
that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden, and they have
the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard, and they have
the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on, and they
have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but
they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs. We have walls
around our property to protect us; they have friends to protect them.”The boy’s father was speechless.Then his son added, “Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are.”

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Chuan and Jing joined a wholesale company together just after graduation. Both worked very hard.

After
several years, the boss promoted Jing to sales executive but Chuan
remained a sales rep. One day Chuan could not take it anymore, tender
resignation to the boss and complained the boss did not value hard
working staff, but only promoted those who flattered him.

The boss
knew that Chuan worked very hard for the years, but in order to help
Chuan realize the difference between him and Jing, the boss asked Chuan
to do the following. Go and find out anyone selling water melon in the
market? Chuan returned and said yes. The boss asked how much per kg?
Chuan went back to the market to ask and returned to inform boss the $12
per kg.

Boss told Chuan, I will ask Jing the same question? Jing
went, returned and said, boss, only one person selling water melon. $12
per kg, $100 for 10 kg, he has inventory of 340 melons. On the table 58
melons, every melon weighs about 15 kg, bought from the South two days
ago, they are fresh and red, good quality.

Chuan was very impressed and realized the difference between himself and Jing. He decided not to resign but to learn from Jing.

My
dear friends, a more successful person is more observant, think more
and understand in depth. For the same matter, a more successful person
sees several years ahead, while you see only tomorrow. The difference
between a year and a day is 365 times, how could you win?

Think! how far have you seen ahead in your life? How thoughtful in depth are you?

Monday, June 2, 2014

Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in
the air. You name them – work, family, health, friends and spirit and
you’re keeping all of these in the air.

You will soon understand that
work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the
other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit are made of glass.
If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked,
nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must
understand that and strive for balance in your life. How?

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t
take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you
would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don’t
let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for
the future. By living your life one day at a time, you live ALL the days
of your life.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us each together.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don’t
shut love out of your life by saying it’s impossible to find. The
quickest way to receive love is to give; the fastest way to lose love is
to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it
wings.

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you’ve been, but also where you are going.

Don’t forget that a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.

Don’t be afraid to learn. Knowledge is weightless, a treasure you can always carry easily.

Don’t
use time or words carelessly. Neither can be retrieved. Life is not a
race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

Friday, May 30, 2014

A cold March wind danced around the dead of night in Dallas as the
Doctor walked into the small hospital room of Diana Blessing. Still
groggy from surgery, her husband David held her hand as they braced
themselves for the latest news. That afternoon of March 10,1991,
complications had forced Diana, only 24 weeks pregnant, to Danae Lu
Blessing.

At 12 inches long and weighing only one pound and nine
ounces, they already knew she was perilously premature. Still, the
doctor’s soft words dropped like bombs. I don’t think she’s going to
make it, he said, as kindly as he could. “There’s only a 10 percent
chance she will live through the night, and even then, if by some slim
chance she does make it, her future could be a very cruel one.” Numb
with disbelief, David and Diana listened as the doctor described the
devastating problems Danae would likely face if she survived. She would
never walk, she would never talk, she would probably be blind, and she
would certainly be prone to other catastrophic conditions from cerebral
palsy to complete mental retardation, and on and on.

“No! No!” was all
Diana could say. She and David, with their 5-year-old son Dustin, had
long dreamed of the day they would have a daughter to become a family of
four. Now, within a matter of hours, that dream was slipping away.Through
the dark hours of morning as Danae held onto life by the thinnest
thread, Diana slipped in and out of sleep, growing more and more
determined that their tiny daughter would live, and live to be a
healthy, happy young girl. But David, fully awake and listening to
additional dire details of their daughter’s chances of ever leaving the
hospital alive, much less healthy, knew he must confront his wife with
the inevitable. David walked in and said that we needed to talk about
making funeral arrangements. Diana remembers, ‘I felt so bad for him
because he was doing everything, trying to include me in what was going
on, but I just wouldn’t listen, I couldn’t listen. I said, “No, that is
not going to happen, no way! I don’t care what the doctors say; Danae is
not going to die! One day she will be just fine, and she will be coming
home with us!”As if willed to live by Diana’s determination,
Danae clung to life hour after hour, with the help of every medical
machine and marvel her miniature body could endure. But as those first
days passed, a new agony set in for David and Diana. Because Danae’s
under-developed nervous system was essentially raw, the lightest kiss or
caress only intensified her discomfort, so they couldn’t even cradle
their tiny baby girl against their chests to offer the strength of their
love. All they could do, as Danae struggled alone beneath the
ultraviolet light in the tangle of tubes and wires, was to pray that God
would stay close to their precious little girl. There was never a
moment when Danae suddenly grew stronger.But as the weeks went
by, she did slowly gain an ounce of weight here and an ounce of strength
there. At last, when Danae turned two months old, her parents were able
to hold her in their arms for the very first time. And two months
later-though doctors continued to gently but grimly warn that her
chances of surviving, much less living any kind of normal life, were
next to zero. Danae went home from the hospital, just as her mother had
predicted.Today, five years later, Danae is a petite but feisty
young girl with glittering gray eyes and an unquenchable zest for life.
She shows no signs, what so ever, of any mental or physical impairment.
Simply, she is everything a little girl can be and more-but that happy
ending is far from the end of her story.One blistering afternoon
in the summer of 1996 near her home in Irving, Texas, Danae was sitting
in her mother’s lap in the bleachers of a local ballpark where her
brother Dustin’s baseball team was practicing. As always, Danae was
chattering non-stop with her mother and several other adults sitting
nearby when she suddenly fell silent. Hugging her arms across her chest,
Danae asked, “Do you smell that?” Smelling the air and detecting the
approach of a thunderstorm, Diana replied, “Yes, it smells like rain.”
Danae closed her eyes and again asked, “Do you smell that?” Once again,
her mother replied, “Yes, I think we’re about to get wet, it smells like
rain. Still caught in the moment, Danae shook her head, patted her thin
shoulders with her small hands and loudly announced, “No, it smells
like Him. It smells like God when you lay your head on His chest.” Tears
blurred Diana’s eyes as Danae then happily hopped down to play with the
other children.

Before the rains came, her daughter’s words
confirmed what Diana and all the members of the extended Blessing family
had known, at least in their hearts, all along. During those long days
and nights of her first two months of her life, when her nerves were too
sensitive for them to touch her, God was holding Danae on His chest and
it is His loving scent that she remembers so well.

Monday, May 26, 2014

Many years ago, Norman Cousins was diagnosed as “terminally ill”. He
was given six months to live. His chance for recovery was 1 in 500.He
could see the worry, depression and anger in his life contributed to,
and perhaps helped cause, his disease. He wondered, “If illness can be
caused by negativity, can wellness be created by positivity?”

He
decided to make an experiment of himself. Laughter was one of the most
positive activities he knew. He rented all the funny movies he could
find – Keaton, Chaplin, Fields, the Marx Brothers. (This was before
VCRs, so he had to rent the actual films.) He read funny stories. He
asked his friends to call him whenever they said, heard or did something
funny.His pain was so great he could not sleep. Laughing for 10
solid minutes, he found, relieved the pain for several hours so he could
sleep.

He fully recovered from his illness and lived another 20
happy, healthy and productive years. (His journey is detailed in his
book, Anatomy of an Illness.) He credits visualization, the love of his
family and friends, and laughter for his recovery.Some people
think laughter is a waste of time. It is a luxury, they say, a
frivolity, something to indulge in only every so often.Nothing
could be further from the truth. Laughter is essential to our
equilibrium, to our well-being, to our aliveness. If we’re not well,
laughter helps us get well; if we are well, laughter helps us stay that
way.Since Cousins’ ground-breaking subjective work, scientific
studies have shown that laughter has a curative effect on the body, the
mind and the emotions.

So, if you like laughter, consider it sound
medical advice to indulge in it as often as you can. If you don’t like
laughter, then take your medicine – laugh anyway.Use whatever makes you laugh – movies, sitcoms, Monty Python, records, books, New Yorker cartoons, jokes, friends.Give
yourself permission to laugh – long and loud and out loud – whenever
anything strikes you as funny. The people around you may think you’re
strange, but sooner or later they’ll join in even if they don’t know
what you’re laughing about.

Some diseases may be contagious, but none is as contagious as the cure. . . laughter.

Sunday, May 25, 2014

There may be days when you get up in the morning and things aren’t the way you had hoped they would be.That’s when you have to tell yourself that things will get better. There are times when people disappoint you and let you down.

But
those are the times when you must remind yourself to trust your own
judgments and opinions, to keep your life focused on believing in
yourself.There will be challenges to face and changes to make in your life, and it is up to you to accept them.

Constantly
keep yourself headed in the right direction for you. It may not be easy
at times, but in those times of struggle you will find a stronger sense
of who you are.So when the days come that are filled with
frustration and unexpected responsibilities, remember to believe in
yourself and all you want your life to be.

Because the challenges and changes will only help you to find the goals that you know are meant to come true for you.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Abraham Lincoln never quits.Born into poverty, Lincoln was
faced with defeat throughout his life. He lost eight elections, twice
failed in business and suffered a nervous breakdown.He could have
quit many times – but he didn’t and because he didn’t quit, he became
one of the greatest presidents in the United States history.

Here is a sketch of Lincoln’s road to the White House:

1816 His family was forced out of their home. He had to work to support them.

1818 His mother died.

1831 Failed in business.

1832 Ran for state legislature – lost.

1832 Also lost his job – wanted to go to law school but couldn’t get in.

1833
Borrowed some money from a friend to begin a business and by the end of
the year he was bankrupt. He spent the next 17 years of his life paying
off this debt.

1834 Ran for state legislature again – won.

1835 Was engaged to be married, sweetheart died and his heart was broken.

1836 Had a total nervous breakdown and was in bed for six months.

1838 Sought to become speaker of the state legislature – defeated.

1840 Sought to become elector – defeated.

1843 Ran for Congress – lost.

1846 Ran for Congress again – this time he won – went to Washington and did a good job.

1848 Ran for re-election to Congress – lost.

1849 Sought the job of land officer in his home state – rejected.

1854 Ran for Senate of the United States – lost.

1856 Sought the Vice-Presidential nomination at his party’s national convention – get less than 100 votes.

Sunday, May 18, 2014

A 50-something year old white woman arrived at her seat on a crowded
flight and immediately didn't want the seat. The seat was next to a
black man.

Disgusted, the woman immediately summoned the flight
attendant and demanded a new seat. The woman said "I cannot sit here
next to this black man." The flight attendant said "Let me see if I can
find another seat." After checking, the flight attendant returned and
stated "Ma'am, there are no more seats in economy, but I will check with
the captain and see if there is something in first class." About 10
minutes went by and the flight attendant returned and stated "The
captain has confirmed that there are no more seats in economy, but there
is one in first class. It is our company policy to never move a person
from economy to first class, but being that it would be some sort of
scandal to force a person to sit next to an UNPLEASANT person, the
captain agreed to make the switch to first class.

" Before the woman
could say anything, the attendant gestured to the black man and said,
"Therefore sir, if you would so kindly retrieve your personal items, we
would like to move you to the comfort of first class as the captain
doesn't want you to sit next to an unpleasant person." Passengers in the
seats nearby began to applause while some gave a standing ovation.

Friday, May 16, 2014

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them.She said, “I don’t think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.”“Is the man of the house home?”, they asked.“No”, she said. “He’s out.”

“Then we cannot come in”, they replied. In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.“Go
tell them I am home and invite them in!” The woman went out and invited
the men in. “We do not go into a House together,” they replied.“Why
is that?” she wanted to know. One of the old men explained: “His name
is Wealth,” he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to
another one, “He is Success, and I am Love.” Then he added, “Now go in
and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home.”The
woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was
overjoyed. “How nice!!”, he said. “Since that is the case, let us invite
Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!”His wife disagreed. “My dear, why don’t we invite Success?”Their
daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house. She
jumped in with her own suggestion: “Would it not be better to invite
Love? Our home will then be filled with love!”“Let us heed our daughter-in-law’s advice,” said the husband to his wife. “Go out and invite Love to be our guest.”The
woman went out and asked the 3 old men, “Which one of you is Love?
Please come in and be our guest.” Love got up and started walking toward
the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the
lady asked Wealth and Success: “I only invited Love, Why are you coming
in?”

The old men replied together:
“If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would’ve
stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with
him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!”

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Think what a remarkable, unduplicatable, and miraculous thing it is
to be you! Of all the people who have come and gone on the earth, since
the beginning of time, not ONE of them is like YOU!

No one who has
ever lived or is to come has had your combination of abilities,
talents, appearance, friends, acquaintances, burdens, sorrows and
opportunities.No one’s hair grows exactly the way yours does. No
one’s finger prints are like yours. No one has the same combination of
secret inside jokes and family expressions that you know.The few
people who laugh at all the same things you do, don’t sneeze the way you
do. No one prays about exactly the same concerns as you do. No one is
loved by the same combination of people that love you – NO ONE!No one before, no one to come. YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY UNIQUE!

Enjoy
that uniqueness. You do not have to pretend in order to seem more like
someone else. You weren’t meant to be like someone else. You do not have
to lie to conceal the parts of you that are not like what you see in
anyone else.You were meant to be different. Nowhere ever in all
of history will the same things be going on in anyone’s mind, soul and
spirit as are going on in yours right now.If you did not exist, there would be a hole in creation, a gap in history, something missing from the plan for humankind.Treasure your uniqueness. It is a gift given only to you. Enjoy it and share it!No
one can reach out to others in the same way that you can. No one can
speak your words. No one can convey your meanings. No one can comfort
with your kind of comfort. No one can bring your kind of understanding
to another person.

No one can be cheerful and lighthearted and
joyous in your way. No one can smile your smile. No one else can bring
the whole unique impact of you to another human being.Share your
uniqueness. Let it be free to flow out among your family and friends and
people you meet in the rush and clutter of living wherever you are.
That gift of yourself was given you to enjoy and share. Give yourself
away!See it! Receive it! Let it tickle you! Let it inform you and nudge you and inspire you! YOU ARE UNIQUE!

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

It had been a very long night. Our black cocker spaniel ‘Precious’
was having a difficult delivery. I lay on the floor beside her large
four-foot square cage, watching her every movement. Watching and
waiting, just in case I had to rush her to the veterinarian.

After
six hours the puppies started to appear. The first-born was black and
white. The second and third puppies were tan and brown in color. The
fourth and fifth were also spotted black and white. “One, two, three,
four, five,” I counted to myself as I walked down the hallway to wake my
wife, Judy, and tell her that everything was fine.

As we walked
back down the hallway and into the spare bedroom, I noticed a sixth
puppy had been born and was now laying all by itself over to the side of
the cage. I picked up the small puppy and laid it on top of the large
pile of puppies, who were whining and trying to nurse on the mother.
Precious immediately pushed the small puppy away from rest of the group.
She refused to recognize it as a member of her family.“Something’s wrong,” said Judy.I
reached over and picked up the puppy. My heart sank inside my chest
when I saw the little puppy had a cleft lip and palate and could not
close its little mouth. I decided right there and then that if there was
any way to save this animal I was going to give it my best shot.

I
took the puppy to the vet and was told nothing could be done unless we
were willing to spend about a thousand dollars to try and correct the
defect. He told us that the puppy would die mainly because it could not
suckle. After returning home, Judy and I decided that we could not
afford to spend that kind of money without getting some type of
assurance from the vet that the puppy had a chance to live. However,
that did not stop me from purchasing a syringe and feeding the puppy by
hand. Which I did every day and night, every two hours, for more than
ten days. The little puppy survived and learned to eat on his own as
long as it was soft canned food.The fifth week I placed an ad in
the newspaper, and within a week we had people interested in all of the
pups, except the one with the deformity. Late one afternoon I went to
the store to pick up a few groceries. Upon returning I happened to see
the old retired schoolteacher, who lived across the street from us,
waving at me. She had read in the paper that we had puppies and was
wondering if she might get one from us for her grandson and his family. I
told her all the puppies had found homes, but I would keep my eyes open
for anyone else who might have an available cocker spaniel. I also
mentioned that if someone should change their mind, I would let her
know. Within days, all but one of the puppies had been picked up by
their new families. This left me with one brown and tan cocker as well
as the smaller puppy with the cleft lip and palate.Two days
passed without me hearing anything from the gentleman who had been
promised the tan and brown pup. I telephoned the schoolteacher and told
her I had one puppy left and that she was welcome to come and look at
it. She advised me that she was going to pick up her grandson and would
come over at about eight o’clock that evening.That night at
around seven-thirty, Judy and I were eating supper when we heard a knock
on the front door. When I opened the door, the man who had wanted the
tan and brown pup was standing there. We walked inside, took care of the
adoption details and I handed him the puppy. Judy and I did not know
what we would do or say when the teacher showed up with her grandson. At
exactly eight o’clock the doorbell rang. I opened the door, and there
was the schoolteacher with her grandson standing behind her. I explained
to her the man had come for the puppy after all, and there were no
puppies left. “I’m sorry, Jeffery. They found homes for all the
puppies,” she told her grandson.Just at that moment, the small puppy left in the bedroom began to yelp.“My puppy! My puppy!” yelled the little boy as he ran out from behind his grandmother.I
just about fell over when I saw that the small child also had a cleft
lip and palate. The boy ran past me as fast as he could, down the
hallway to where the puppy was still yelping. When the three of us made
it to the bedroom, the small boy was holding the puppy in his arms. He
looked up at his grandmother and said, “Look, Grandma. They found homes
for all the puppies except the pretty one, and he looks just like me.”The schoolteacher turned to us, “Is this puppy available?”“Yes,” I answered. “That puppy is available.”The
little boy, who was now hugging the puppy, chimed in, “My grandma told
me these kind of puppies are real expensive and that I have to take real
good care of it.”The lady opened her purse, but I reached over
and pushed her hand back down into her purse so that she would not pull
her wallet out. “How much do you think this puppy is worth?” I asked the
boy. “About a dollar?” “No. This puppy is very, very expensive,” he
replied.“More than a dollar?” I asked.“I’m afraid so,” said his grandmother.The
boy stood there pressing the small puppy against his cheek. “We could
not possibly take less than two dollars for this puppy,” Judy said,
squeezing my hand. “Like you said, it’s the pretty one.”The schoolteacher took out two dollars and handed it to the young boy.“It’s your dog now, Jeffery. You pay the man.”Still holding the puppy tightly, the boy proudly handed me the money. Any worries I’d had about the puppy’s future were gone.

The
image of the little boy and his matching pup stays with me still. I
think it must be a wonderful feeling for any young person to look at
themselves in the mirror and see nothing, except “the pretty one.”

Monday, May 12, 2014

As a man was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by
the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope
tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the
elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some
reason, they did not.

He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these
animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away. “Well,”
trainer said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same
size rope to tie them and, at that age, it’s enough to hold them. As
they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away.
They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break
free.”

The man was amazed. These animals could at any time break
free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn’t, they were
stuck right where they were.Like the elephants, how many of us
go through life hanging onto a belief that we cannot do something,
simply because we failed at it once before?Failure is part of learning; we should never give up the struggle in life.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

As I walked home one freezing day, I stumbled on a wallet someone had
lost in the street.

I picked it up and looked inside to find some
identification so I could call the owner. But the wallet contained only
three dollars and a crumpled letter that looked as if it had been in
there for years.The envelope was worn and the only thing that was
legible on it was the return address. I started to open the letter,
hoping to find some clue. Then I saw the dateline–1924. The letter had
been written almost 60 years ago.It was written in a beautiful
feminine handwriting on powder blue stationery with a little flower in
the left-hand corner.

It was a “Dear John” letter that told the
recipient, whose name appeared to be Michael, that the writer could not
see him anymore because her mother forbade it. Even so, she wrote that
she would always love him.It was signed, Hannah.It was a
beautiful letter, but there was no way except for the name Michael, that
the owner could be identified. Maybe if I called information, the
operator could find a phone listing for the address on the envelope.“Operator,”
I began, “this is an unusual request. I’m trying to find the owner of a
wallet that I found. Is there anyway you can tell me if there is a
phone number for an address that was on an envelope in the wallet?”She
suggested I speak with her supervisor, who hesitated for a moment then
said, “Well, there is a phone listing at that address, but I can’t give
you the number.” She said, as a courtesy, she would call that number,
explain my story and would ask them if they wanted her to connect me.I waited a few minutes and then she was back on the line. “I have a party who will speak with you.”

I
asked the woman on the other end of the line if she knew anyone by the
name of Hannah. She gasped, “Oh! We bought this house from a family who
had a daughter named Hannah. But that was 30 years ago!”“Would you know where that family could be located now?” I asked.“I
remember that Hannah had to place her mother in a nursing home some
years ago,” the woman said. “Maybe if you got in touch with them they
might be able to track down the daughter.”She gave me the name of
the nursing home and I called the number. They told me the old lady had
passed away some years ago but they did have a phone number for where
they thought the daughter might be living.I thanked them and phoned. The woman who answered explained that Hannah herself was now living in a nursing home.This
whole thing was stupid, I thought to myself. Why was I making such a
big deal over finding the owner of a wallet that had only three dollars
and a letter that was almost 60 years old?Nevertheless, I called
the nursing home in which Hannah was supposed to be living and the man
who answered the phone told me, “Yes, Hannah is staying with us.”Even
though it was already 10 p.m., I asked if I could come by to see her.
“Well,” he said hesitatingly, “if you want to take a chance, she might
be in the day room watching television.”

I thanked him and drove
over to the nursing home. The night nurse and a guard greeted me at the
door. We went up to the third floor of the large building. In the day
room, the nurse introduced me to Hannah.She was a sweet,
silver-haired oldtimer with a warm smile and a twinkle in her eye. I
told her about finding the wallet and showed her the letter. The second
she saw the powder blue envelope with that little flower on the left,
she took a deep breath and said, “Young man, this letter was the last
contact I ever had with Michael.”She looked away for a moment
deep in thought and then said softly, “I loved him very much. But I was
only 16 at the time and my mother felt I was too young. Oh, he was so
handsome. He looked like Sean Connery, the actor.”“Yes,” she
continued. “Michael Goldstein was a wonderful person. If you should find
him, tell him I think of him often. And,” she hesitated for a moment,
almost biting her lip, “tell him I still love him. You know,” she said
smiling as tears began to well up in her eyes, “I never did marry. I
guess no one ever matched up to Michael…”I thanked Hannah and
said goodbye. I took the elevator to the first floor and as I stood by
the door, the guard there asked, “Was the old lady able to help you?”I
told him she had given me a lead. “At least I have a last name. But I
think I’ll let it go for a while. I spent almost the whole day trying to
find the owner of this wallet.”I had taken out the wallet, which
was a simple brown leather case with red lacing on the side. When the
guard saw it, he said, “Hey, wait a minute! That’s Mr. Goldstein’s
wallet. I’d know it anywhere with that bright red lacing. He’s always
losing that wallet. I must have found it in the halls at least three
times.”“Who’s Mr. Goldstein?” I asked as my hand began to shake.“He’s
one of the oldtimers on the 8th floor. That’s Mike Goldstein’s wallet
for sure. He must have lost it on one of his walks.” I thanked the guard
and quickly ran back to the nurse’s office. I told her what the guard
had said. We went back to the elevator and got on. I prayed that Mr.
Goldstein would be up.On the eighth floor, the floor nurse said,
“I think he’s still in the day room. He likes to read at night. He’s a
darling old man.”We went to the only room that had any lights on
and there was a man reading a book. The nurse went over to him and asked
if he had lost his wallet. Mr. Goldstein looked up with surprise, put
his hand in his back pocket and said, “Oh, it is missing!”“This kind gentleman found a wallet and we wondered if it could be yours?”I
handed Mr. Goldstein the wallet and the second he saw it, he smiled
with relief and said, “Yes, that’s it! It must have dropped out of my
pocket this afternoon. I want to give you a reward.”“No, thank you,” I said. “But I have to tell you something. I read the letter in the hope of finding out who owned the wallet.”The smile on his face suddenly disappeared. “You read that letter?”“Not only did I read it, I think I know where Hannah is.”He
suddenly grew pale. “Hannah? You know where she is? How is she? Is she
still as pretty as she was? Please, please tell me,” he begged.“She’s fine…just as pretty as when you knew her.” I said softly.The
old man smiled with anticipation and asked, “Could you tell me where
she is? I want to call her tomorrow.” He grabbed my hand and said, “You
know something, Mister? I was so in love with that girl that when that
letter came, my life literally ended. I never married. I guess I’ve
always loved her.”“Mr. Goldstein,” I said, “Come with me.”We
took the elevator down to the third floor. The hallways were darkened
and only one or two little night-lights lit our way to the day room
where Hannah was sitting alone watching the television. The nurse walked
over to her.“Hannah,” she said softly, pointing to Michael, who was waiting with me in the doorway. “Do you know this man?”She
adjusted her glasses, looked for a moment, but didn’t say a word.
Michael said softly, almost in a whisper, “Hannah, it’s Michael. Do you
remember me?”She gasped, “Michael! I don’t believe it! Michael!
It’s you! My Michael!” He walked slowly towards her and they embraced.
The nurse and I left with tears streaming down our faces.“See,” I said. “See how the Good Lord works! If it’s meant to be, it will be.”About
three weeks later I got a call at my office from the nursing home. “Can
you break away on Sunday to attend a wedding? Michael and Hannah are
going to tie the knot!”It was a beautiful wedding with all the
people at the nursing home dressed up to join in the celebration. Hannah
wore a light beige dress and looked beautiful. Michael wore a dark blue
suit and stood tall. They made me their best man.The hospital
gave them their own room and if you ever wanted to see a 76-year-old
bride and a 79-year-old groom acting like two teenagers, you had to see
this couple.A perfect ending for a love affair that had lasted nearly 60 years.

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Maturity is many things. It is the ability to base a judgment on the big picture, the long haul.It means being able to resist the urge for immediate gratification and opt for the course of action that will pay off later.

One of the characteristics of the young is “I want it now.”Grown-up people can wait.Maturity
is perseverance–the ability to sweat out a project or a situation, in
spite of heavy opposition and discouraging setbacks, and stick with it
until it is finished.The adult who is constantly changing friends
and changing mates is immature. He/she cannot stick it out because
he/she has not grown up.

Maturity is the ability to control anger
and settle differences without violence or destruction. The mature
person can face unpleasantness, frustration, discomfort and defeat
without collapsing or complaining. He/she knows he cannot have
everything his/her own way every time. He/she is able to defer to
circumstances, to other people-and to time. He/she knows when to
compromise and is not too proud to do so.Maturity is humility. It
is being big enough to say, “I was wrong.” And, when he/she is right,
the mature person need not experience the satisfaction of saying, “I
told you so.”Maturity is the ability to live up to your
responsibilities, and this means being dependable. It means keeping your
word. Dependability is the hallmark of integrity. Do you mean what you
say-and do you say what you mean?

Unfortunately, the world is filled
with people who cannot be counted on. When you need them most, they are
among the missing. They never seem to come through in the clutches. They
break promises and substitute alibis for performance. They show up late
or not at all. They are confused and disorganized. Their lives are a
chaotic maze of broken promises, former friends, unfinished business and
good intentions that somehow never materialize. They are always a day
late and a dollar short.

Maturity
is the ability to make a decision and stand by it. Immature people
spend their lives exploring endless possibilities and then doing
nothing. Action requires courage. Without courage, little is
accomplished.Maturity is the ability to harness your abilities
and your energies and do more than is expected. The mature person
refuses to settle for mediocrity. He/she would rather aim high and miss
the mark than low-and make it.Maturity is the art of living in
peace with that which cannot be changed, the courage to change that
which should be changed, no matter what it takes, and the wisdom to know
the difference.

Monday, May 5, 2014

Hi! How are you?” The woman smiled as she took the seat beside me.
She had to lower herself slowly, squeezing her ample bottom into the
seat, filling all available space.Positioning herself
comfortably, she plopped her enormous arm on our common armrest. Her
immensity saturated the space around us, shrinking me and my seat into
insignificance.

I cringed and reclined towards the window.She
leaned towards me and repeated her greeting in an upbeat, friendly
voice. Her face towered above my head, forcing me to turn to look at
her. “Hi,” I replied with obvious loathing.I turned away to stare
out the cabin window, sulking silently about the long hours of
discomfort I was going to experience with this monster beside me.

She nudged me with her meaty arm. “My name is Laura. I’m from Britain. How about you? Japan?”“Malaysia,” I barked.“I’m
so sorry! Will you accept my heartfelt apology? Come, shake my hand. If
we’re going to spend six hours side-by-side on this flight, we’d better
be friends, don’t you think?” A palm waved in front of my face. I shook
the hand reluctantly, still silent.Laura started a conversation
with me, taking no notice of my unfriendly reactions. She talked
excitedly about herself and her trip to Hong Kong to see her frinds. She
rattled off a list of things she was going to buy for her students in
the boarding school where she was teaching.I gave her one-word
answers to her questions about me. Unperturbed by my coldness, she
nodded as she made appreciative comments to my answers. Her voice was
warm and caring. She was considerate and obliging when we were served
drinks and meals, making sure that I had room to manoeuvre in my seat.
“I don’t want to clobber you with my elephant size!” she said with
utmost sincerity.To my surprise, her face which repulsed me hours
before, now opened into extraordinary smiles, lively and calm at the
same time. I couldn’t help but let down my guard slowly.Laura was
an interesting conversationalist. She was well read in many subjects
from philosophy to science. She turned a seemingly unimportant subject
into something to explore and understand. Her comments were humorous and
inspirational. When our topic turned to cultures, I was pleasantly
surprised by her intelligent comments and well-thought-out analysis.During our conversation, Laura managed to make every cabin crew who served us walk away laughing at her jokes.When
a flight attendant was clearing our plates, Laura cracked several jokes
about her size. The flight attendant roared with laughter as she
grabbed Laura’s hand, “You really make my day!”For the next few
minutes, Laura listened attentively and gave pointers to the flight
attendant’s weight problem. The grateful attendant said before she
rushed off, “I’ve got to work. I’ll come back later and talk to you
about it.”I asked Laura, “‘Have you ever thought about losing some weight?”“No. I’ve worked hard to get this way. Why would I want to give it up?”“You aren’t worried about cardiovascular diseases that come with being overweight?”“Not
at all. You only get the diseases if you’re worried about your weight
all the time. You see advertisements from slimming centres that say,
‘Liberate yourself from your extra baggage so that you are free to be
yourself.’ It’s rubbish! You’re liberated only if you’re comfortable
about who you are, and what you look like any time of the day and
anytime of the year! Why would I want to waste my time on slimming
regimes when I have so many other important things to do and so many
people to be friends with? I eat healthily and walk regularly; I’m this
size because I am born to be big! There is more to life than worrying
about weight all day long.”She sipped at her wine. “Besides, God
gives me so much happiness that I need a bigger body to hold all of it!
Why would I lose weight to lose my happiness?” Taken aback by her
reasoning, I chuckled.Laura continued. “Folks often see me as a
fat lady with big bosoms, big thighs and a big bottom that no man would
even bother to cast a glance at. They see me as a slob. They think I’m
lazy and have no willpower. They’re wrong.” She held up her glass to a
passing flight attendant. “More of this magnificent wine, please.” She
smiled sweetly at the attendant. “Great service from your crew. May God
bless all of you.”She turned to me, “I’m actually a slim person
inside. I’m so full of energy that people won’t be able to keep up with
me. This extra flesh is here to slow me down, otherwise I’ll be running
everywhere chasing after men!”“Do men chase after you?” I asked jokingly.“Of course they do. I’m happily married but men still keep proposing to me.“Most
of them have relationship problems and they need someone to confide in.
For some reason, they like to talk to me. I think I should have been a
counsellor instead of a school teacher!”Laura paused before she
said thoughtfully, “You know, the relationship between men and women is
so complicated. Women worship men and call them, ‘Honey’ until they find
out they have been lied to, and then they turn into bitter gourds! Men
love women so much that they see them as their soul mates until they
look at their credit card bills, and then women become devils with
tridents!”Laura’s enthralling conversation had turned the flight
into something thoroughly enjoyable. I was also fascinated by the way
people were drawn to her. By the end of the flight, almost half the
cabin crew was standing near the aisle by us, laughing and joking with
Laura. The passengers around us joined in the merry-making too. Laura
was the centre of attention, filling the cabin with delightful warmth.When
we waved goodbye to each other at the arrival lounge at Hong Kong’s Kai
Tak Airport, I watched her walking towards a big group of adoring
adults and kids. Cheers sounded as the group hugged and kissed Laura.
She turned around and winked at me.I was stunned, as the realisation set in: Laura was the most beautiful woman I had ever met in my life.