Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

I would normally plan to send you an invoice for the keyboard that was partially destroyed when I spurted coffee on it reading your hilarious article, but I realize you may need the funding for your next Pulitzer campaign, for which you richly deserve.

I'm half way through -- saving the rest for tonight -- and my belly is shaking like a bowlful of jelly. And not from what I ate last night either. Very perceptive political analysis, which is WHY DAVE SHOULD RUN FOR PRESIDENT.

Annie - eewwwwww, brain bleach!!!! No, can't happen, Blogo has gone over to the ferrets. Sigh, Dave, let's donate 2009 to North Korea. I didn't even want to read it first, but the laughs were worth it. For me, more of the bad stuff was out "there", and I had a better year in "here."

Course, meeting Dave and Ridley was the highlight of my year! Underwear included.

and it proves that you really cant make stuff up.
you da best, dave!! and i live in Albany, where you really cant make up the stuff our legislature did this year. frankly, i wish they'd all taken a hike on the appalachian trail.
Splendid writing!

Suzy, the true beauty in that is that Purell is anti-bacterial, and useless against a virus like the flu. I was sicky this week and found a Lysol wipy product that is anti-viral, but was amused to read Lileks patting himself on the back for avoiding illness by using a product that, basically, prevents cheese. Headline:

Ditto cindy. Couldn't make it up. It's been a fertile year. Lots of manure. Tax dodger running the IRS, Congressmen and Senators voting on things they never intended to read if they could, Joe Biden, reality show auditions in Colorado and the White House. I'm going hiking next year, the Appalachian Trail is only 20 miles from here. Don't tell Mrs. Mouth. Just have to avoid Rob Blagoyevich.

hey - the tiger wood story, and the crap about the parents of the quints - the ones getting a divorce - whoever they are - that alone you couldnt make up.
you may have left out tom delay. i was laughing too hard to remember what i read.

Tnx, muchly, Dave (judi, Walter, Mrs. Dave and Sophie, and all the folks here on the blog) for once again remindin' me of how much fun it is to view the world with a high degree of realisiticalness, instead of how the "mainstream media" doofuses (doofusi?) would have us believe stuff happens ...

1. Through a combination of human and pharmaceutical support, I am now in a mental state where I am capable of holding down a job.
2. I got a job (that I love doing).
3. I read Dave Barry's Year In Review.

Wow, and this was BEFORE the terrorist tried to blow up Detroit with his support hose.

This bears repeating: someone tried to terrorize us by almost blowing up Detroit. It just shows how distorted their view of America really is. "I burn all the Cadillacs and Escalades! America will crumble!" I want to somehow convince these people that Glenn Beck is the heart and soul of America.

I love this bit from Dave's year in review "On the environmental front, Copenhagen hosts a massive international conference aimed at halting manmade global warming, attended by thousands of delegates who flew to Denmark on magical carbon-free unicorns."

Padraig,

I think someone needs to broadcast to the terrorists who actually go out and do this that this terrorist got severe burns on his groin area. Hard to deal with those legendary virgins when that happens.

It's also interesting that the top terrorist leaders never actually go out and suicide bomb themselves. If they think this is so great, why don't they do it? Hypocrites.

I hope the terrorists have got it wrong and meet up with legendary Virginians. Preferably the ones that wrote the Constitution.
I will say as far as the second incident that occurred today, I would hate to be in the airplane bathroom for a extended length of time because of a bad burrito and have FBI agents banging on the door with guns drawn yelling for me to get out.

"Thank you, Reverend, for your kind email. Yes, I was so thrilled with the successful outcome that I could not help but let the bells chime! Ding, dong, doing! Ding, dong, doing! I hope the noise was not too bothersome."

nc, unless you are absolutely certain that he is a DB blogger and would appreciate the gentle ribbing, I would not chance it. On the other hand, if he is a DB blogger, he has no excuse. Oh, and also, if our priests are reading this blog, we are all screwed in need of a good confession.

Awesome column, Dave. Should have come with a beverage warning. And what's up with the "Charles Darwin" character in the Herald's comment section?

I would hate to be in the airplane bathroom for a extended length of time because of a bad burrito and have FBI agents banging on the door with guns drawn yelling for me to get out.

nursecindy, apparently the second Nigerian arrested yesterday for causing a "disturbance" on that same flight was indeed suffering from a bad burrito. Or whatever the Nigerian equivalent is.

Myself, I've resolved that if I can't easily drive somewhere, I don't actually have to travel there. And will continue to do so until TSA finally understands that "security" is not synonomous with "passenger harassment and humiliation."

She tells a greats story about how Michael Jackson locked himself in the Men's in the West Wing and the Secret Service very nearly broke the door down to get him out. Apparently there's a time limit on potty breaks in the West Wing, even if you're (not your) Michael Jackson.

This year was so rich, even Dave could not cover it all. Magic unicorns is great, but there has to be additional humor in climate gate. How about Barney Frank’s boyfriend at Fanny Mae; Chris Dodd’s “cottage” in Ireland; or Rush Limbaugh’s NFL event. There are others I just can’t remember right now.