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February 14, 2008

While We Were Out

It figures that tons of evil slutty news would come around while we're trying to get caught up after dealing with our technical difficulties last week. (Actually I just crashed the site temporarily so that I could spend all of my free time ordering 18-1 shirts and buying magazines with Eli Manning on the cover, but the other Evil Sluts aren't big sports fans so don't tell them, okay?)

Let's start with some dumb politician quotes. Dumb Things Guys Say will never die as along as politicians are around to say stupid shit like this.

Colorado state rep. Larry Liston (R-do we really even need to include the R? you'll know it's an R once you read this) thinks teenage parents are sluts.

"In my parents' day and age, (unmarried teen parents) were sent away, they were shunned, they were called what they are. There was at least a sense of shame.

"There's no sense of shame today. Society condones it. I think it's wrong. They're sluts. And I don't mean just the women. I mean the men too."

While it's very 'progressive' of Liston to include teenage boys in his slut proclamation, he's still a dumbass. He later apologized for his "unfortunate choice of language", but not for the comment itself because after all, he was just making a point about personal responsibility. You know what would help teens to be more responsible, and reduce teen pregnancy rates in the process? Say it with me now: comprehensive sex education. Oh, and teaching teens to value themselves, respecting them enough to actually give them the information they need to make responsible decisions, and not making them feel dirty and stupid and worthless for daring to have sex. And not openly waxing nostalgic about the good old days when teen mothers were sent away and shunned by society would probably help too. Shut the fuck up, Larry Liston.

If you'd like to personally tell Larry to suck it, but probably not in those exact terms because we would never want to offend him with an unfortunate choice of language, his phone number is 303-866-2965 and his email address is Larry.Liston.house@state.co.us.

Speaking of nostalgia, in the Tennessee state Senate last week a debate about some anti-choice legislation produced this gem about rape from Senator Doug Henry. (The link is to feministing, and they have video of these comments, but be warned that it might make you want to reach through the screen and slap him.)

"Rape, ladies and gentlemen, is not today what rape was. Rape, when I was learning these things, was the violation of a chaste woman, against her will, by some party not her spouse. Today it’s simply, ‘Let’s don’t go forward with this act.’"

Ah yes, let's all take a minute to remember the good old days of rape. Too bad women had to screw that up by being all unchaste and unmarried and stuff. Uppity slutty women ruin everything.

Over at MSNBC, reporter David Shuster said that it seems to him like Chelsea Clinton is "being pimped out" by her mother's campaign, because Chelsea is making phone calls to superdelegates and offering to have sex with them if they'll support her mom. Oh wait, no, she's totally not doing that. She is making some phone calls, attending events, and other stuff to campaign for her mother...just like the adult children of almost every candidate in recent memory have done. According to Shuster though, "there's just something a little bit unseemly" about it. (He later 'apologized' twice and was suspended by MSNBC, which probably had something to do with a very angry Clinton campaign threatening to pull out of a scheduled MSNBC debate.)

Apparently Shuster was annoyed by the fact that Chelsea is campaigning for her mom but not granting any interviews or otherwise making herself available to the press. I can't imagine why she wouldn't want to talk to such fine upstanding journalists like David Shuster on such a wonderful, not-at-all sexist network like MSNBC. We're not sure why he feels that Chelsea has some obligation to the media, since she's not the candidate, but certainly being annoyed about it is reason enough to go on TV and suggest that she's being exploited by her own mother. Maybe during Shuster's downtime while he's suspended he can pitch a new show to MTV. Pimp My Campaign could be a force for positive change--boring old campaign pins and posters could really use some bling.

Two 8th graders in St. Louis were suspended for going to school in shirts with condoms and the words "safe sex or no sex" on them. The girls wore the shirts to protest their school's abstinence only sex education program. They were suspended because the shirts were "distracting". I guess it could be considered distracting for school officials to be confronted with the gaping hole in their health curriculum. It's pretty cool that these girls decided to stand up for their right to a complete education, since at its core abstinence only education is really condescending and patronizing and dismissive and insulting to students' intelligence. But maybe they could have avoided the suspension by saying that they were just really big TLC fans.

A federal appeals court has struck down a Texas law that makes it a crime to promote or sell sex toys. "Whatever one might think or believe about the use of these devices," said an opinion written by Justice Thomas M. Reavley of the 5th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in New Orleans, "government interference with their personal and private use violates the Constitution."

Under Texas law it is illegal to sell, advertise, give or lend obscene devices, defined as a device used primarily for sexual stimulation. Anyone in possession of six or more sexual devices is considered to be promoting them. The Texas law dates back to the 1970s and is seldom enforced. Travis County prosecutors say that they haven't charged anyone with a sexual device-related crime in at least the past seven years, and probably much longer. In 2003, a woman in the Fort Worth suburb of Burleson drew nationwide attention when she was arrested for selling erotic toys at a Tupperware-type party. The charges against Joanne Webb were later dropped.

In addition to Texas, whose law has survived previous state court challenges, three other states have a similar sex toys statute: Mississippi, Alabama and Virginia. Laws in Louisiana, Kansas, Colorado and Georgia have been thrown out by courts in recent years.

So it's a good day for sexual freedom of choice in Texas. This should mean that companies like Babeland will now be able to ship to Texas, so start shopping! Maybe this means there's still some hope for Alabama.