Playing with Big Kids: Pros and Cons

There are pros and cons to letting your baby play with older kids. Here, four activities that are safe and fun for everyone.

Playing with (or, rather, next to) an older child can be an amazing event for your baby. Most babies are fascinated by bigger kids who appear so much more capable yet aren't as large and intimidating as grown-ups can be. Observing a slightly older child can help your baby pick up vocabulary words and new skills as he strives to imitate his pal. Your child may even be inspired to pick up a toy he's never been interested in before — if his friend plays with it first. And big kids (preschool-age and up) typically love showing off their knowledge to an adoring audience.

But such eager interest can work against you too. An older child's toys may have small, choke-size parts or otherwise be inappropriate for your nine-month-old, so stay alert. Watch for sharing spats as well — even a very gracious older child may have a tough time being consistently gentle with a grabby baby.

To keep everyone safe and entertained, suggest some activities that your little one and his older playmate will both enjoy. Here are a few to try:

Show and tell. Have the older child "read" books (pop-ups or other interactive titles work well) or flashcards to the baby, or draw pictures and then talk about them.

Song and dance. Whether they listen to it or make it themselves (with simple rhythm instruments or household items), music has nearly universal appeal.

Run and race. If your baby is crawling, encourage the older child to get down on the floor with him. They can race across the room (on all fours!) or maneuver through an obstacle course of pillows and cardboard boxes.

Stack and crash. Blocks are perfect playthings for kids at different developmental levels — especially if you challenge the older child to build something that the baby can knock down. (If the older one wants to build a more permanent creation, help him find a place out of the baby's reach.)

From the What to Expect editorial team and Heidi Murkoff, author of What to Expect the First Year. Health information on this site is based on peer-reviewed medical journals and highly respected health organizations and institutions including ACOG (American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists), CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) and AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics), as well as the What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff.

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What to Expect the First Year, 3rd Edition. Heidi Murkoff and Sharon Mazel.