Thoughts and Musings of a young therapist, student, and professional people observer

The other side of lonely part III

This is the third installment of (apparently) my annual blog post on the other side of loneliness. The basic idea is that we can be profoundly lonely at some of the best times of our lives. I wrote the first blog after one of my most stressful academic days. I had to do a presentation for the faculty of my school. This presentation included a video clip of me conducting therapy with a couple and rationalizing all my therapeutic interventions witty explanations on what I was trying to accomplish. This was also accompanied by a declaration of my therapeutic orientation and background information. Needless to say, it was the culmination of two years of clinical work and class work and was necessary in order to graduate. I did the presentation and passed with flying colors with some really positive feedback from faculty. It was a great moment. Hence my assertion that sometimes our happiest moments can be our loneliest because we don’t have anyone to share it with. I still think it’s true two years later. Some people say that you can’t miss something you’ve never had. While I disagree, I also think that you miss something in a different way when you have had it at some point and had to give it up. By this same token, having someone there for one occasion will make you appreciative but it could also make you lonelier when it happens again without the presence of said person. I think that loneliness is felt more acutely when you’ve known what it’s like to have someone there. It’s not necessarily a bad thing because you learn how to truly appreciate the times that were the exception to the “rule.”