Love and the Man in Lingerie, Part Two: Stop Wearing Lingerie?

Updated on October 13, 2009

Maybe you should go cold turkey?

Continued from part one, where we discussed the nature of love, and difficult nature of a man wearing lingerie in a relationship.

Well, some simple minded people might say, if it causes so many problems, why not just stop wearing it? After all, if you had a particular affinity for wearing an ugly tie that you one day discovered repulsed women, logic would dictate that you would simply change it for one that was more attractive to the opposite sex, thereby achieving your ultimate goal of finding love and intimate affection.

It's not that simple though, is it? Most men who wear lingerie find it very hard to give it up. Many try, either throwing their lingerie collections away, or putting them into storage in dark drawers or chests up in the attic. No doubt some men are able to free themselves of the pull of lingerie, but more often and not the energy that is expended in trying to rid himself of lingerie simply makes a man more addicted to it. The more he can't have it, the more he wants it.

Some men don't go quite as far as to throw their lingerie away, but they do hide it. They then date and even marry without their partner ever knowing that they have the slightest desire to slip into a pair of stockings at the end of a long day. Whilst this may get them more dates and more intimacy initially, this tactic usually inevitably fails. Either the wife or girlfriend discovers the lingerie and assumes he is cheating or is simply a very dishonest person who hides things from her, which effectively alienates her from the relationship, or she doesn't find out and he continues his secret lingerie life for many years, often building silent resentment towards the wife for, in his mind, not allowing him to wear his lingerie, for not allowing him to be himself. The husband and wife become strangers to one another, she doesn't know why he is distant in some respects, and he may not even realize until it is far too late that he does resent her, quite unfairly, may I add.

Lying and hiding don't come highly recommended, so then we have the option of telling a partner, "Guess what honey, I like to wear panties!" Depending on the partner that can go over well, "Oh darling! Let's go shopping!",be a relative non event, "So do I sweetie, go and change the light bulb in the bathroom." Or, and this is the fear of many men who wear lingerie, become world war three "You sick freak! That's disgusting! Are you gay?!"

What next? (Go to part three, in which we discuss the choice of female partners.)

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