I don’t even think of it as Valentine’s Day because well it is the day before my birthday and I have never really gotten anything special for Valentine’s Day. Even though a few years ago I was dating someone around this time, we were fighting already, should have been the first sign that one wouldn’t have worked.

You would think that since I have been dating JS I would be excited about VDay this year, but I am not. At the beginning of the month I started counting down to my day and even mentioned something to JS. He asked if I updated my Amazon wish list, so I was thinking I might be getting something and that he was planning something.

Then last week, I let him know I wanted to do something with him for my birthday and he said we would figure something out. Then we planned a date for this past Friday and since he hurt himself pretty bad the week before he suggested movies and dinner in. We decided to rent some movies and get burgers and he spent the night. It was a great night and we had lots of fun. We both went to bed smiling and woke up the same way. When I walked him to his car I suggested we do something Monday night. I wasn’t suggesting we celebrate Valentine’s Day but more going out for my birthday, and he said maybe. He wished me an early Happy Birthday and then was off. Later in the day as we were texting I suggested we go to a movie on Monday, he said something about working on his writing project so I asked when are we going to celebrate my birthday.

Then there was nothing until this morning, when he said he wasn’t planning on seeing me on my actual birthday and that he kinda thought Friday would cover that and that this week is pretty busy for him. The one justification is that I am going to a taping of one of my favorite tv shows on my actual birthday and since he works he wouldn’t be able to go. But the way he said he “kinda thought Friday would cover that”, hurt. So I responded by saying, “I know that my actual birthday I am going to the taping, I just thought another day we could go to a movie. I didn’t realize that was our celebration, I did have fun though, thank you.” He said the taping should be fun and I said yeah I am going with a friend so it should be fun.

Then there was nothing again. For me the whole thing hurt because we didn’t do anything that was different from what we usually do. I felt like an idiot because of what I did for his birthday. Doing something for people you do because you want to, so I didn’t expect anything in return but even just going out even if it is us going out to a movie a day or two after.

I talked to a couple of guy friends and even one of my girlfriends and they all said that most guys suck at the birthday and holiday thing. I can see where they are coming from because JS’s bday is on a major holiday and he doesn’t get overly excited about it.

Honestly I don’t know what to think. Was there a miscommunication or is it that to him birthdays are no big deal? Am I wrong for feeling a little hurt?

(A friend of mine posted this video today on their Facebook. Seemed fitting to post in this post after what happened and how I am feeling.)