Dudes to Avoid Dating: a Semi-Comprehensive List

It takes all kinds. There are tons of fish in the sea. Keep an open mind. That's how those sayings go. But there's this other saying that goes "Don't date anyone you think is horrible or unappealing," and I really like that one. So before you agree to go out with any old, uh, fish, here's a list of kinds I happen to find particularly cringeworthy, personally.

Either I'm losing it, this is Jon Hamm, or Jon Hamm has a twin. Is this Dan Hamm?!

Dudes who crush beer cans with their heads.

For the love of Pete, dudes who have kids who have kids! (Although for older ladies, it is possible to appeal in the rare case of GILF.)

Dudes who, on dates, ever say anything along the lines of "I mean, what is racism/sexism, really?"

Dudes who want to talk about Megan Fox for more than 5 minutes--unless you just want to get laid.

Dudes who want to talk about Chris Colfer for more than 5 minutes--unless you just don't want to get laid.

Dudes who yell things like "Hellz, yeah!" when your parents are around.

Dudes who say things about "eliminating the homeless problem" but not in the kind, "let's get them homes" way--in the American Psycho way.

Dudes who continually reassure you "Don't worry, my ex-wife has been great about adhering to the restraining order. Today."

Dudes who respond to your breathless explanation of life goals/dreams with "Aw, that's so cute," then checks their watch.

Dudes who claim to be "too straight" to get the appeal of Ryan Gosling, because they are... robots? Seriously, what is that?

Dudes who only kind of care occasionally.

Dudes who don't care at all, ever.

Dudes who would care if only you were just perfect all the time (Spoiler alert: You are, and they don't, so forget them).

Dudes who are on or have been on any trashy reality show, ever. Especially, especially, Jersey Shore.

Do you guys concur or disagree with my least favorite types of guys to encounter? Got any other dudes to avoid?