Thursday, December 22, 2011

Santa Uncovered: Scandal Rocks Reindeer Games!

So I was watching Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer last night and was intrigued about how much of a total jerk Santa was (I'll be getting sticks and coal this year in my stocking). In addition to forcing the misfit toys into exile on their own cold-as-the-9th-level-of-Dante's Hell island in the middle of the Arctic Ocean, which for some reason remained unfrozen despite it being the middle of winter, Santa totally took part in reindeer discrimination.

After Rudolph dominates the Reindeer Games by flying higher than any other young buck, his fake nose falls off, revealing his red nose. All the reindeer laughed and called him names. Rudolph's father, Donner, looked on in bewildered embarrassment. Coach Reindeer, who frankly has that Jerry Sandusky look about him, does nothing. Then Santa turns to Donner and says, "You should be ashamed of yourself. What a pity. He had a nice take off too" and walks away in disgust.

Really Santa?

Here's the clip. Santa appears at the 3:20 mark. Fireball, Rudolph's supposed friend, has a great reaction at the 3-minute mark. The whole scene is priceless, unintentional comedy.

So what does this have to do with running? Everyone makes fun of the way I run. But if they think I'm pulling their car out of a ditch in a snowstorm, they're sadly mistaken. They can freeze to death for all I care.

Merry Christmas!

One more thing. This incident goes against the Teen Wolf Theory of Life, which states that no matter how big of a freak you are, if you're good at sports people will like you.