What we have here is a Victoria’s Secret Super Bowl commercial, and if you’re anything li—Okay. You’ve already skipped the writing and clicked “play,” haven’t you? I don’t blame you. And honestly, it makes my job easier. I could write anything right now, and no one would even notice. Watch:

“I deflated all those footballs.”

“David Stern was just a figurehead, and the freemasons really control the NBA.”

I REALLY don’t have much else to say. You know what the video is, and I know as well as you do that you’re going to watch it. So, as I said, my job’s pretty easy here. And the fact that this is a Super Bowl post that isn’t related to either Richard Sherman or deflated footballs is just icing on the cake.