I Think I'm Starting To Feel Like It's Time

I was watching TV, bleary-eyed from the couch this weekend. Anna had reality TV on and as I faded in and out of my Nyquil haze, I reached a sad and inescapable conclusion:

Honey Boo Boo's Mom has a boyfriend and I don't.

I'm not turning my nose up at her, believe me. Her family may not be a group you want at your swanky dinner party, but they laugh a lot and really love each other. She just cements for me the simple truth that there's someone for everyone. And I can be an everyone. In fact, it's high time I started thinking like an everyone instead of like a just me.

Because 'just me' is lonely. I want someone to see movies with. Someone to eat great chinese food with. Someone to have an inside joke with once in awhile. I don't need anything epic. I just want something between wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am and happily-ever-after. Something to tide me over till I figure out just what it is I want, really.

Is it foolish to think of dating when I don't know what I'm looking for? I do know what I don't want, so maybe by process of elimination, I can figure it out. It's just that it's all so new to me. I only had a handful of boyfriends before Peter came along, and never did the bar and club scene or any kind of basic dating. I guess my oats were never wild enough to sow and now here I am trying to figure it all out in middle age. I feel like I need a guidebook and three lifelines on speed dial!

When you started dating again, did you feel a little lost? Am I over-analyzing this?

About The Author

Ellie DeLano

Ellie DeLano is a parenting and relationship blogger, a freelance writer, a full-time working single mom, and frequently exhausted. She's slogging her way through the world of single parenting, mid-life dating and reinventing herself with a pop-tart in one hand and a glass of wine in the other.

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