Saturday, September 15, 2012

Awake and Aware

“It is not good for the man to be alone" -- Genesis 2:18. I believe this means that no human is meant to live completely without other humans. Teenagers seem, like toddlers, to think they are more powerful than they are. Only a strong circle of sober, strong adults can keep them within the bounds of our values.

There is nothing as challenging in life as bringing teenagers into adulthood. In areas where we didn't make it, it is impossible to lead our children there. This is why children need a network of caring adults, with shared family goals, to help them go through life. Sadly, many children are torn apart by competing, seemingly irreconcilable differences in family values.

I have heard so many parents say that all they want is for their children to be "happy." I have always wanted for my children to be compassionate, responsible citizens. This desire has often kept any of us from feeling "happy" for long periods of time. I have been willing to live with this, but it has been difficult on my marriages and other relationships. When Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy?

I see as a tragedy that too many of us give up on our children's souls in order to have what we call "peace" in our homes. We figure that if we can't beat our children and the world at keeping our children from spiritual harm, we'll simply enjoy the ease of joining them. We drug ourselves and our children and begin on a slippery slope that can lead to the deaths of our souls. Death is, after all, the ultimate "peace," or is it?

When our souls die, our bodies are actually in agony, constantly hungry, for we know not what. It is for a place of peace inside of ourselves and our circle. But if the circle is broken, where can we go to rest? There are so many children broken beyond repair because they have no safe circle to run to and call, "home."

The greatest sin seems to be those who enter those safe circles pretending to be protectors, when in fact, they are predators and people who want to be our children's playmates instead of partners in parenting. Where can a child go from there, especially when maintenance of the circle becomes more important than the child? Drugged parents are not paying attention. Circles of family and of faith are excellent hunting grounds for "virgin" victims. We must all stay awake and aware. Our time to play is after they move away.

With very strong leadership and consistent boundaries, teenagers can feel safe enough to throw themselves against the walls of our love and know that they will be protected from evil, both inside their own heads and from those outside our circles. The important thing is that we have a strong committed circle in which they can act out their crazies. No amount of drugs can make them feel as secure as faithful family circle can.

I have lost so many to drugs long before their bodies died. The pain of looking into the eyes of a loved one and seeing nothing is almost unbearable. Where does the soul go? It seems into hell because those who seek "happiness" in constant "euphoria," whether through drugs or other forms of blocking the senses can no longer handle anything outside of their own "euphoric" states. Even religious ecstasy is wrong when entered into at the expense of the children in our care.

Heaven (The kingdom of "God") on earth is in the sure, loving eyes and hands of others, never completely in our own heads, hearts, or souls, no matter with whom or how hard we pray.

I've experienced the truth of that Biblical statement and life principle. I'm glad God made Eve and presented her to Adam, who accepted her company and loved her - thus bringing other men and women into the world. The woman was made for the man and the man was made from the woman. I like some alone time - but it's wonderful to get back with my woman.