Which means that if we all actually succeed in our “10 Pounds by Christmas” goal, we’ll have collectively lost close to four tons.

Not bad at all.

When I Say Ten, I Mean Ten

There are quite a few comments in yesterday’s post saying things like, “I don’t have ten pounds to lose, so count me in for losing the eight extra ounces I’d like to get rid of.”

Which is awesome. I’m incredibly happy (and by “happy” I of course mean “envious”) that I have some readers that don’t have a lot of weight to lose, and that you’re jumping on this bandwagon to lose that final three pounds or whatever.

But this is a ten-pound challenge, and I created it for those of us who have more than ten pounds to lose, and want to get rid of at least ten pounds by Christmas. In other words, this is a “let’s jumpstart our weight loss” contest. And the people who get prizes will all have lost a minimum of ten pounds.

As we get into Spring or maybe Summer, I like the idea of a “last X pounds” challenge, where — hopefully — a bunch of us will compete to get rid of those final stubborn pounds together. And since those pounds are the hardest to get rid of, I think the incentives might be a little more awesome.

Call For Sponsors

Right now, the “Fatty’s Ten Pounds By Christmas” challenge is not really sponsored. Prizes are just the cool things I happen to already have laying around my office but haven’t given away.

But that doesn’t mean this challenge couldn’t be sponsored. If I were a company with a product that appeals to motivated, engaged cyclists, I think I’d take a look at a contest that obviously has captured a lot of interest in a short time and consider hitching myself to that star, as it were.

As in, if you’d like to make this the “[Your Company Name] / Fat Cyclist Ten Pounds by Christmas Challenge,” email me.

I’m not really looking for money as part of this sponsorship (though I suppose it’d be nice for me to get enough money out of this to cover the shipping costs I’m going to incur by mailing out so much schwag); I’m interested in cool giveaways — either small things that you’re willing to send to a lot of winners, or some grand prizes you’d be willing to send to one or more lucky winners.

Or both. Both would be good.

How to Lose an Extra 0.2 Pounds

This morning, I woke up excited. Yesterday I had accomplished a rare thing: a no-mistakes diet day. So I knew I’d have lost a lot of weight.

I stepped on the scale: 170.8 pounds. A loss of 2.4 pounds in one day. Not bad at all.

But I wanted more.

So I punched the reset button on the scale and climbed on. This time, I got 170.6. What had changed? I wasn’t sure. So I reset the scale again and climbed back on. 170.6 again.

Yes, I know. I should be satisfied with a day’s loss of 2.6 pounds. But that extra 0.2 pounds I seem to have lost over the course of seven seconds left me wanting more.

I got greedy.

Surely, I thought, it must be possible for me to lose yet another 0.2 pounds (my scale increments in 0.2 pounds, or I’d probably have been satisfied with 0.1 pounds). Right now.

Attempt One: Leg Shaving

With ten inches of snow sitting on my lawn, I’m not getting outside in shorts often. My tan is gone; my legs hadn’t been shaved in two weeks.

It occurs to me — now that it’s too late — that my legs are not the only things I can shave. Perhaps if I had shaved my head, arms, armpits, face and chest, I might have been able to bridge that gap to 0.2 pounds through de-hair-ization alone.

Which is something I’ll keep in mind tomorrow.

Attempt Two: Total-Concentration Peeing

Naturally, I peed before weighing myself this morning. But by the time I finished showering, (very, very thoroughly) toweling off, and weighing myself, that I might possibly be able to pee just a little bit more.

Doesn’t need to be a lot. I mean, how much is three ounces (I’m sure that getting rid of the hair must have gotten rid of at least 0.6 ounces, right?) of water? A couple teaspoons? Maybe a quarter cup at most.

And — if you think about it — you’ve almost always got a little bit of pee ready to go.

Except I didn’t. I just stood there for about two minutes, feeling a little bit silly.

No, wait. There it is. And, there, I’m done.

Well, if I didn’t pee out three ounces, I did at least post a new record for “most effort for least pee.”

My weight: still 170.6.

Attempt Three: Brushing Teeth

Have you ever considered that the plaque and other miscellaneous gunk that builds up on your teeth has mass? Well of course it does!

And this morning, I decided that a good teeth brushing might just remove enough of that stuff to tip the scale to 170.4.

So I brushed. Very extensively.

And then I spat. And spat again. And then I gleeked a couple of times (one of my not-very-famous super powers).

And weighed myself. 170.6.

Sheesh.

Then, in a burst of inspiration, I reset the scale and climbed back on — but this time inched my toes forward ever so slightly. Because…well…I kind of have this idea that the scale is just a hair friendlier toward the front.

170.2. I have lost an even three pounds my first day of the Challenge.

Fair and square.

109 Comments

Dammit – I was on a conference call when I started reading this and had not muted my line. The laughing snort that sprang from my lips before I could stop it sounded suspiciously like it could have also been a fart.

My only saving grace was that there was one other person who was not muted. I of course did not say anything on the premise that “s/he who smelt it, dealt it.” And if I had gone for the truth – that I had chortled aloud for god sake when someone was talking about deprioritizing flash on the network – NO ONE would have believed me and I would have been outed to boot.

So thanks. Thanks a lot man. And by the way – my barrista about fell over this morning when I asked for non-fat milk in my quad latte instead of full-fat. Blech.

My wife (above) said I had to read this when she was not on another conference call. Good call! I like the reaching out for sponsors, how ’bout if the 750 of us also send $10 bucks to LIVESTRONG. A nice end of the year present from Team Fatty (us). Those needing to lose less should of course send more. Morning weight 228. Go Fatty’s

This contest is only 24 days but whenever we have a weight loss contest at work, for every week that you don’t lose weight you have to put in $5. I will be donating $5 for any week I don’t lose to Fatty’s Live Strong page.

Your post yesterday inspired me to due away with the excuse that it is getting cold out and finally break open the new trainer that my wife got me and get to work. Biked for one hour today and I plan on keeping going everyday until this challenge is done. I am really interested in seeing where this takes me with this challenge and with my own personal health. Thank you. Weight just a couple of minutes ago was 297.4. Down 3 lbs from yesterday.

How (where) should be make the Livestrong donation once we have lost our weight so that we can make sure that 1) Team Fatty (and this challenge) gets credit for the donation and 2) it be tracked how much this specific event raised? Or is how much it lost? :-)

Need you to get Visa debit on the site as asked several times before !
Visa is a Major Sponsor for Para Sport so they should see an advantage in having the Debit card available as well as the credit card facility.
Because of my cycling being a major component of my life style i have been aware that weighing after a long ride before a shower results in a variation on completion of the shower !
856 comments is a lot of reading and it would not surprise me that the 28 on this item is past the 100 by the time i post.
Going below 78 kg causes me dizzy and nervous reactions so anyone able to advise a cure feel free to advise and eating power bars on the galibier and toumalet at this point demonstrates the need for caution.
Great prizes and i reckon that there are about 10 people to each comment that would like to join in but know that you would not have the time to read all .

Once again good luck to all that are able to compete on the guidelines laid down !

This made me laugh and sad because I clearly see how neurotic I am. I can attest to the weigh-in before/after shower.. you do soak up water. I thought I was the only one who was playing games with the scale. Reset button? Check (although if you like the number, don’t reset.. chances are it’s going to go up). Brush teeth? Check. Pee for all you’re worth? Check. Exhale as much as you can? Check. Blow all the snot out of your nose? Check. I have a .5 lb differential and would love to have a .1 or .2 one but I’m too cheap to buy one.. My challenge started today becuase I didn’t weigh yesterday am.. so far so good. Snuck in an hour ride on the stationary bike at the gym.

Despite the fact that this contest is BLATANTLY anti-antipodean (we are all already svelte as we start our summer season and so have bugger all to lose) I take the challenge on behalf of all Aussies, except maybe Skippy as I can’t tell from his rambling comment whether he’s in or not.

This is just the incentive I needed “FREE STUFF”
Current weight 164 lbs still old school here in Canada. 11 stone 10 lbs UK “Alex”
Wife “Lynn” like most women will not tell publicly but wants to be part of the event. We share the same email address.
She assures me she will be honest and post only if she makes the goal.

This is actually a 15 lb weight loss. If I lose 10 lb combined with the 5 lbs that I *won’t* gain, then I’m losing 15 lbs! This post hit home as I had the same thought last week (“I’m not gaining those 10 lbs this December!”) So tonight I went out and rode in the pouring rain with 20 mph winds. Never would have done that before – count me in; I’m motivated now! 228 lb.

Glad to see there are others willing to give. Now Fatty, please make us a page. Surprised to see that no one has mentioned the ‘Full Moon’ weigh in day, no not the pants down variety, that is already a given. Check the almanac; http://www.almanac.com/moon/full/CA/San%20Rafael
Think tides, gravitational pull, and luna (cy). It can’t just be about peeing and shaving. Fast on!

I thought this was a blog for “fat cyclists”, what’s up with all of your starting weights? They are all lower than my goal weight. Oh well I am in for at least ten, my starting weight is 336 lbs. 326 by Christmas will be a good jump start for me to try and fit into my new Fat Cyclist kit, I’m stretching out the seams on the XXL, but I’m going to fit into the Kit in 2011. Thanks for the challenge.

P.S. Top Secret way to lose a few pounds, but only in an emergency – Colon Hydrotherapy – kind of like pooping but easier.

I’m with Susan, although in the spirit of fairness I would like to point out that it’s pretty hard to lose 5 pounds when you’re close to your goal (and a chick!). The arguments I will have to be eligible for a tee shirt. Good luck everyone! I’m in for solidarity.

In the spirit of it (to minimize my ability to cheat…) I have an updated weight (sorry for the extra work, must be rather time consuming by hand, got to get some sort of automated system to pull all the numbers for you!)

with a more reasonable choice of clothes, lack of things in the pockets and consistent time of day

I did not weight myself this morning – I am the type that doesn’t want to know. I will weight Dec. 6 and report if all this damn suffering has resulted in a weight loss. I miss my sugar and eating between meals! But then again that may explain the size of my behind! Two and three pounds in one day? What are you people doing to lose that much weight that quick? Please share!!!!

I would luv to join in the hubbabaloo of loosing the weight but I think my doctors would be mad with me being 6mos pregnant and the baby needing any of the weight I’m starting to finally gain. So, I will cheer on those in the contest for good luck. Though I think I will try not to gain more than 10 pounds which should be fine since they save on average is .5 pounds per week for good podling development.

Like the first comment, I read this post at work and couldnt contain the laughter which is a problem as I sit next to my humerless boss. Im in for the 10 to Livestrong – please post a link to the page. Also as one poster said, “This made me laugh and sad because I clearly see how neurotic I am”. Great stuff! Thanks for the motivation and the smile!! Day 1 down .4 pound.

I’m on of those can’t lose 10 pounds people, but I just wanted to say that I by no means wanted to be included when I laid out my own goals! You guys are doing the hard work and deserve the prizes (and health benefits!). I just wanted to participate in spirit! And love the idea of a Livestrong donation!

Fatty…if I lived near you (even a state near you) I’d probably would be at your house on the sixth ready to hit the “reset” button on your scale for my weigh in!! I’ve noticed that when my five year old granddaughter jumps on my scale it can alter the results…but not always in my favor!

Yikes, Fatty! Showering before weighing can add up to 1/2 pound (water absorbed by skin) – Always weigh BEFORE showering…!!! but after peeing and spitting and brushing off dead skin cells with a vegetable brush…

You are awesome. You crack me up. I know I’m late to join the contest but I was debating wether or not to join in. You see I’m couch ridden with a big plastic boot om my foot awaitng to see if I need surgery on my Achilles tendon. So weight loss is not on my mind. But I guess it should be so if you will have me I’d like to join. I’m 270. I can use a challenge. Thank you

I’ve started weighing myself a few times a day. I am amazed at the fluctuations during the day. My strategy to lose weight is very simple. Just say NO to all of the decisions about food. NO on the dessert, No I WON’T have fries with that, Thanks for the offer, I’m good. The other part is saying YES to working out. Long rides (50+ miles) are always good for a pound or two.

Just in case we forgot … “a pint’s a pound the world around.” Two cups of water weighs 16 oz, 1/8 of a cup is 1 oz. 3 TBSP = 1/8 of a cup. SO there you go. If you can pee out three tablespoons of water, there’s 3/16 of a pound; = 0.1875 lbs. With rounding error, 0.2 pounds.

I was watching a boxing match this past weekend and they pointed out that one boxer had gained 15 pounds in the _single_ day between the weigh-in and the fight. It made me wonder what horrible things these guys are doing to themselves to get that kind of weight off in a totally temporary manner.

Fatty…once your body has digested what you have consumed it goes to the appropriate “waste holding tanks” appropriately labeled #1 and #2. It’s at this point when you can no longer consider what’s in those holding tanks as part of you. So of course you would want to empty the tanks before you step on the scale…and this is best dine in the morning.

All kidding aside, if you want to maximize your possibility for outstanding scale readings be aware of what you eating the day before you weigh. Higher intakes of sodium, caffeine, pasta binging can all contribute to less desirable numbers. In addition, water, water, water…drink it, drink it, drink it. Rinse out all that you don’t want to keep. I have a theory that drinking lots and lots of it also rinses the fat(of course I mean the biological kind) out. Last, don’t punish yourself…take a rest day from workouts and honest nutrition. Have a small treat…it helps to make the adventure a little more tolerable.

I’m not going to jump on the wagon with all of you but I’ll applaud your efforts and successes. I’ll stick with my workouts and honest nutrition, and I’ll be happy with any weight loss. 5 pounds might be a better goal for me but I won’t put a deadline to achieve it by.

I’m looking forward to reading follow ups over the next few weeks. Should be fun!

Started at 177.0. Weighed in today at 175.4, without resorting to any tricks. At this rate, I will only lose 6 pounds by Christmas. I think there are a few places where I can kick it up a notch, like no beer. It’s extreme, but so is 10# by Christmas.