I'm so sorry for what you have been through. Your fears are very valid, I'm sure I would feel the same. I really don't have any advice on what you should do, but just wanted to offer you some hugs. I hope you can come to a decision that is right for you and your family.

What a courageous woman you are! Thank you for sharing. It is an incredible miracle that the infection just disappeared. I am a woman of faith, and I believe it was God's hand that healed you. You have an amazing testimony! I would encourage you to pray about another child (if that's something you feel comfortable with). God will provide direction for you, I'm sure. to you and your family!

Thanks guys. I feel so pitiful. And today is just a bad day. So thanks for the hugs. Im trying to be strong. My grandma says I had a healing and I try to focus on that. Some days its hard not to be angry.

Thanks for the prayers. I know what is meant to happen, will.

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Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest of these are might have been.

What a courageous woman you are! Thank you for sharing. It is an incredible miracle that the infection just disappeared. I am a woman of faith, and I believe it was God's hand that healed you. You have an amazing testimony! I would encourage you to pray about another child (if that's something you feel comfortable with). God will provide direction for you, I'm sure. to you and your family!

You are a strong woman! We have somethings in common (unfortunately they aren't things people want to have in common as far as complications from iud in intestines) I am also considering an anxiety medication. I sent you a message back with me email address. I encourage you to start a blog. I feel it has been somewhat therapeutic...even though I feel my whole situation has fully hit me yet, but when it does I feel someplace to express how you feel is a good thing. Feel free to contact me.

Oh, mama, my heart aches for you. What a lot you have had to endure, and the toll it takes on so many other areas of your life. Your husband has endured a lot, and your babies, too. It does sound like you have been encircled in the arms of His love, and I believ you did experience a healing. It's hard to trust again. but I can say with assurety that He knows your needs and your trials, and He is the only one who can get you through. I had a third degree tear with my first, and I didn't experience that level of damage with my second or third. I know for me it was not being in an upright position, and then having an episiotomy, so not only was I cut, once that skin was rent, it just continued to tear. But I don't pretend to know anything about the level of pain you had to go through.

It sounds to me too that you have trauma you are still dealing with. It might be helpful to talk to someone, a counselor, clergy person, etc., to see if you can work through any of this. (((hugs)))

Thanks for the warm words. I have been talking to someone. But I was glad to share here. No one really understands unless they are a mom too. All these kind words from everyone have really helped. I don't feel so alone.

On a good note, I did stop taking my bc pills which were majorly contributing to my really bad moods. Psych pills are off the table. I have been feeling more and more like a whole woman and mother again. I really hope a new baby is in the future.

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Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest of these are might have been.