Creating a scenario between the Asthaana Director of the Mylapore Mossee Dee Lowre (aka Dir) and the Post-Doctoral Scholar on the Violation of Indian Culture in Western Art (aka Doc), DJSJ came up with this hilarious dialogue of picture captions.

First up is the Venus de Milo.

Dir: Isn’t that The Birth of Venus?

Doc: Anyway, Milo or Birth, it is still karmam karmam. Botticelli couldn’t afford her a Rs 300 saree from Pothys or what? If not Pothys, at least he could have draped her in a Kerala style white saree. Those don’t even cost Rs 200.

Whereupon our man decides to make our Venus a little more presentable, renaming it the Venus de Varma.

Our Doc goes on to vilify the Mona Lisa.

Doc: What sort of married woman lets her hair virinjufied like some 1970s rock star and wears no pottu (bindi) or (shiva shiva) thaali?

And proceeds to "lakshanamistify" her thus -

Renoir's La Promenade also comes under fire for promoting values contrary to Indian virtues. Declaring that no couple in the cit of Chennai must be allowed to roam unchaperoned by our good men in khaki, he makes a little addition to Renoir's masterpiece.