Saturday, October 8

Hu's on first?

(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.George: Great. Lay it on me.Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.George: That's what I want to know.Condi: That's what I'm telling you.George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?Condi: Yes.George: I mean the fellow's name.Condi: Hu.George: The guy in China.Condi: Hu.George: The new leader of China.Condi: Hu.George: The Chinaman!Condi: Hu is leading China.George: Now whaddya' asking me for?Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?Condi: That's the man's name.George: That's whose name?Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?Condi: Yes, sir.George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.Condi: That's correct.George: Then who is in China?Condi: Yes, sir.George: Yassir is in China?Condi: No, sir.George: Then who is?Condi: Yes, sir.George: Yassir?Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.Condi: Kofi?George: No, thanks.Condi: You want Kofi?George: No.Condi: You don't want Kofi.George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.Condi: Yes, sir.George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.Condi: Kofi?George: Milk! Will you please make the call?Condi: And call who?George: Who is the guy at the U.N?Condi: Hu is the guy in China.George: Will you stay out of China?!Condi: Yes, sir.George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.Condi: Kofi.George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?