Thoughts on everyday life and inspiring others to contribute to life in a positive way.

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Friday, February 20, 2015

Breaking The Horse

When I began
teaching and coaching, my first three years were at the second smallest school in
the state of Wyoming.It was a social
studies position in a grade seven through twelve school.Seventy-two kids in the high school, and 117
kids total.It was located in Veteran
and practically in the middle of nowhere.I lived in Yoder, which was a short distance away.And I loved it.I look back at it and wonder just how I
managed to do it being young and dumb and naïve as I was, but I’m thankful that
I had the opportunity to learn and grow so much.

Keith was one of
my students, an eighth grader when I first began.Quiet, hard-working, a ranch kid.He could ride and rope and I still have this picture
of him up in the saddle with his cowboy hat on, leaning on the saddle horn, a
smile on his face as he looks off in the distance.

His horse had a
foal and he had to train it, which also meant Breaking it.

Breaking The Horse
sounds rather harsh, doesn’t it?I mean,
when you break a dish, a window, or a mirror, it shatters and pieces fly
everywhere, not to mention seven years bad luck for shattering a mirror, allegedly.It’s work to clean up the mess and too
difficult to repair, so we end up throwing it away never to use it again.

In essence, that’s
what takes place to the horse’s spirit . . . sort of.

Keith was very
gentle about it, though.He would talk
to the horse (the original horse whisperer, I think), pet it, lead it, and would
lean on it.Get the foal used to him, to
a human, to his scent and to his touch.I
remember the foal fighting him a little when he tried to place a bit and bridle
in its mouth, but eventually the foal would allow him to do so.And in time, just like the foal’s momma, or
mare, the foal was as friendly as could be.It would come when Keith called to it.As long as he was nearby, the foal would allow me to pet it, and if
Keith road the foal’s momma, the foal would tag along, actually allowing Keith
the lead it by the bit and bridle.In Keith’s case,
the foal started out skittish, but ended up friendly and fairly docile.

Breaking The
Horse.

At times, it seems
we Break each other.

I’ve been broken a
time or two in my life.Probably more
than a time or two.I’ve been in various
jobs and positions where because of fear, I was afraid to act, afraid to make a
decision.I didn’t know what to say,
what to do, or how to think or act.My
boss liked it that way.Various people
who thought they were my boss liked it that way.

I didn’t.

I was
unhappy.I was sad, perhaps
depressed.I hated going to work.My wife, Kim, said I aged before her eyes.

And I’ve watched
adults Break kids.

Think about it . .
.

I’m an adult and I
suffered.I had various abilities and
ways I could cope, but I still suffered.

Imagine a child at
any age when an adult Breaks him or her.Their spirit.Their hope.Their inquisitiveness.Their creativity.Their sense of identity and their sense of
purpose. All Broken.

Sometimes the
adult will “justify” it, saying to anyone who will listen that it is for their
own good.Their own good.

Exactly who’s
good?The child who walks through life
Broken, without hope and fearful of what is in store for the future?The child who is so afraid he or she cannot
decide, afraid to live for fear of what might happen next?

Or . . .

Is it for the good
of the adult because he or she likes order, likes the control, likes to be in charge?Maybe likes to win?Perhaps, in a darker view, likes the victim
to be “in that place” whatever place that is.

I’m thinking that
guidance and training and discovery is better than Breaking.Done with love, with care and compassion, a
child will flourish and grow and become.Like Keith and his foal, some gentle talking . . . whispering, some
petting, some leading and gentle leaning showed the foal what Keith’s
intentions were.So too, an adult can,
with love and kindness, with compassion and care, show a child what the adult’s
intentions are.And in the long run, we
don’t Break the child’s spirit, the child’s passion, the child’s purpose, the
child’s identity.We guide and love, not
Break.Because once the child is Broken,
the pieces are too shattered and scattered to pick up and repair. And a child
should never, ever, be thrown away. Something
to think about . . .

Live Your Life,
and Make A Difference!

To My Readers:

The second book of
TheLives
Trilogy, Shattered Lives, was sent off to the publisher.It should be out the end of February, 2015 or
the beginning of March, 2015.