We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic. You can read more about it and change your preferences here.

People Share ‘Red Flags’ They Ignored In Their Relationships That Turned Out To Be Very Toxic (30 Pics)

I think it's safe to say most of us have had our fair share of bad relationships. But when does a bad relationship becomes toxic? The kind that takes a toll on your physical, psychological, spiritual or emotional well-being?

Twitter user Halima has set out to find out just that. Recently, she asked people what 'red flags' they overlooked in their exes and her tweet instantly went viral.

From forcing girlfriends to cut off ties with all of their guy-friends to defending everything but your boyfriend, scroll down to see what to look out for in your next relationship and let us know in the comments if you have something to add to the list.

Dr. Lillian Glass, a California-based communication and psychology expert, who says she coined the term 'toxic relationship' in her 1995 book Toxic People, defines it as “any relationship [between people who] don’t support each other, where there’s conflict and one seeks to undermine the other where there’s competition, where there’s disrespect, and a lack of cohesiveness.”

Dr. Kristen Fuller, a California-based family medicine physician specializing in mental health, toldTIME that those who regularly undermine or cause harm to their partner often have a reason for their behavior even if it’s subconscious. “Maybe they were in a toxic relationship, either romantically or as a child. Maybe they didn’t have the most supportive, loving upbringing,” Fuller says. “They could have been bullied in school. They could be suffering from an undiagnosed mental health disorder such as depression or anxiety or bipolar disorder, an eating disorder, any form of trauma.”

Either way, being in a toxic relationship with these people might even cause health problems similar to those caused by fast food or other toxic environments. "In fact, unhealthy relationships may contribute to a toxic internal environment that can lead to stress, depression, anxiety, and even medical problems," author and psychologist Dr. Sherrie Bourg Carter wrote for Psychology Today.

To back up her claim, Dr. Carter highlighted a long-term study that followed more than 10,000 subjects for an average of 12.2 years. Eventually, it was discovered that subjects in negative relationships were at a greater risk for developing heart problems, including a fatal cardiac event, than counterparts whose close relationships were not negative.

As we can see, positive relationships are vital for a healthy, well-balanced life. "Make sure your health-conscious lifestyle doesn't leave out this crucial ingredient," Dr. Carter concluded.

That's true. In a healthy relationship you should be able to count on your partner whatever happens. That way those kind of feelings should not be able to come up. Yeah of course there can be a phase for whatever reason where you feel kind of that but it should never be a constant thing

Don't blame yourself for hanging around, it's really hard to leave an abusive relationship, especially when it's emotionally and mentally abusive because then it's easy for you to think you're just overreacting or making things up. And people like these control you and manipulate you and threaten you into staying

If someone cheats on you, then it's a clear sign they don't really respect you as a person, and continuing a relationship like that can be extremely challenging, especially when the cheater is also emotionally abusive

Ouch, and the reverse is true here: I could never cheat for many many reasons, but one of them is sort of funny....The first person I would want to tell about the event would be my best friend. Who I am married too....We talk too much almost, and no matter how mad I am she can still get me talking about random things and enjoying the conversation.

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 235 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

Li is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda. It all started from a simple need to create his own personal avatar on one of the websites back in 2008. That's how he discovered Photoshop and all the magic it can provide for a creative person. 10 years passed and in 2018, Li became a Photo Editor here at Bored Panda, mainly working with all sorts of images you see in our posts. The best topic to do a post about? - Cats. Yeah, you would never guess it by looking at his profile pic!

I tried to break up with her four times over two years, but she kept talking me out of it. I finally realized the relationship was toxic when after a big fight she suggested counseling. I thought she meant couples counseling, but it was just for me because she figured all the problems with our relationship must be my fault. The real kicker? The therapist couldn't find anything "wrong" with me, but instead of suggesting my unhappiness may be due to being in a shitty relationship she decided I "might" have a chemical imbalance and prescribed antidepressants. Long story short, I finally left her and immediately stopped taking those useless pills. I've been perfectly fine ever since and happily married to my soulmate for twenty years.

If anyone out there reading this comment feels like they're in a toxic and abusive relationship, I hope you'll have the strength to get out of it and remember that getting abused is not your fault and you shouldn't blame yourself

When my mother introduced me and my sister to her new boyfriend, I knew there was something off about him. He'd look me in the eye, but he acted like he was forcing himself to smile. Like he was actually sizing me up. I tried to tell my mother, but she ignored me. Months later, I found out he was beating the crap out of her on the regular. When we went to move my mother out of his apartment, he had come home and grabbed a knife to threaten her not to leave. He was met by my brother who said "While you're standing there with that knife, ask yourself what happened to the gun you had hidden under your pillow. I suggest you leave or you'll be wishing the cops were here in a minute." He left, we moved her out, she actually tried to go back to him. We laid down a "it's him or us" ultimatum. She finally left him for good.

This also applies to friendships. I had a friend in high school that I hung out with a lot. I caught times when she would degrade me or make snide comments about my appearance. I brushed it off. When I met the man who would become my husband, she was kind of ok with it, but angry I was not hanging out with her all the time like we used to. Then when my son came along, she became cold and made it perfectly clear she hated kids. Every time after that, whenever we contacted each other..she'd play the pity party. "I don't know if I should move back..it's not like I have any friends there" even though I still lived there. The last time she pulled it I said "Ya know what..why don't you stay where you are. It's not like we have a friendship anyway. You heap on the abuse and I take it. Well..I'm done taking it. Go love yourself. I'm sure you'll be happy being all alone for the rest of your narcissistic life" and hung up. I felt super cleansed.

I tried to break up with her four times over two years, but she kept talking me out of it. I finally realized the relationship was toxic when after a big fight she suggested counseling. I thought she meant couples counseling, but it was just for me because she figured all the problems with our relationship must be my fault. The real kicker? The therapist couldn't find anything "wrong" with me, but instead of suggesting my unhappiness may be due to being in a shitty relationship she decided I "might" have a chemical imbalance and prescribed antidepressants. Long story short, I finally left her and immediately stopped taking those useless pills. I've been perfectly fine ever since and happily married to my soulmate for twenty years.

If anyone out there reading this comment feels like they're in a toxic and abusive relationship, I hope you'll have the strength to get out of it and remember that getting abused is not your fault and you shouldn't blame yourself

When my mother introduced me and my sister to her new boyfriend, I knew there was something off about him. He'd look me in the eye, but he acted like he was forcing himself to smile. Like he was actually sizing me up. I tried to tell my mother, but she ignored me. Months later, I found out he was beating the crap out of her on the regular. When we went to move my mother out of his apartment, he had come home and grabbed a knife to threaten her not to leave. He was met by my brother who said "While you're standing there with that knife, ask yourself what happened to the gun you had hidden under your pillow. I suggest you leave or you'll be wishing the cops were here in a minute." He left, we moved her out, she actually tried to go back to him. We laid down a "it's him or us" ultimatum. She finally left him for good.

This also applies to friendships. I had a friend in high school that I hung out with a lot. I caught times when she would degrade me or make snide comments about my appearance. I brushed it off. When I met the man who would become my husband, she was kind of ok with it, but angry I was not hanging out with her all the time like we used to. Then when my son came along, she became cold and made it perfectly clear she hated kids. Every time after that, whenever we contacted each other..she'd play the pity party. "I don't know if I should move back..it's not like I have any friends there" even though I still lived there. The last time she pulled it I said "Ya know what..why don't you stay where you are. It's not like we have a friendship anyway. You heap on the abuse and I take it. Well..I'm done taking it. Go love yourself. I'm sure you'll be happy being all alone for the rest of your narcissistic life" and hung up. I felt super cleansed.