Wednesday, 31 August 2016

I had my first period at the age of 12. And I had no clue about it whatsoever. I did ask questions about what ‘Whisper’ and ‘Stayfree’ were, when advertised on television, but got no direct answer. The only thing that got to my ears was, ‘You’ll learn when you will come of age!’ And I used to wonder, will my brains automatically get the information from my surroundings, or will there be some information centre that will fill be up with the answers to my endless questions?

Anyway, my mother discovered and helped me when I had my period. I was a quiet child then. I wasn’t very talkative and usually preferred to stay mum in front of guests. When periods hit me, I was kind of neutral. Luckily, I had painless periods. It was only the discomfort that comes along that bothered me. And yes, not worshipping was another thing that I didn’t like about it.

Certain people lectured me about how I should behave in front of people and I shouldn’t talk about it in public, that I shouldn’t touch the vessel and pickles, and behave mature, coz now I am a grown up and not a child anymore. That was what actually scared me!

I now wonder, why? There was nothing to be scared of, nothing to be guilty of and nothing to be

ashamed of! Having periods is the most natural things to happen, just like having a grey hair. It is the sign of indicating fertility amongst women, and imagine if it doesn’t occur timely, then it can be a really serious problem! Something as natural as this is treated with utmost shame! It’s a taboo to talk about it in front of people, especially the males.

Again, why? It’s all pointless! And it only leaves the boys with half-baked knowledge, which is even worse.

I remember having a few people in our school making us aware about the do’s and don’ts along with other information about ‘those days’!

Our school uniform was a white kurta with the red checked jacket. I dreaded going to school during those days, anxious of having a stain and often pestered my friends to check if I have stained my kurta. Of course, I reciprocated the same during their times! But as much as I hated that time of the month, I equally enjoyed the liberty that came along with it!

Making an excuse for not feeling well during the P.T. classes, not indulging in any sports or laborious activity, and lying down at home to take that extra nap, relishing the liberty of not studying and having a perfectly sound explanation for the same were some of the perks that came along. Thank God!

Now when I think about it, it only makes me smile. And with time, I’m kind of used to it. I’ve befriended with them. And it usually doesn’t bother me much now.

But what bothers me sometimes is when I see my relatives, wherein a family of 5, there are 4 females (three daughters and one mother), and when the mother is going through her menstrual cycle, it’s the elder daughter, of a mere age of 12, has to make tea, cook food, and do all the kitchen and household stuff! And by chance, if the dates of the mother and the daughter clashed, then the man of the house would bring some food from outside or eat at his friend's place and get packed for his family as well!

I really feel bad for them, for being stuck with all the old traditions. I feel sad for the little girls where in their years of growing up, they should be playing and fighting and falling and making friends, they are being caught in the shackles of such customs. And this is despite the fact that the family is an educated one!

Not touching the pickle, standing outside the temple and pray (and let the world learn that the woman is having her periods), not touching holy plants, not entering the kitchen, sleeping alone on a separate bed sheet and having meals in separate utensils, are some of the customs that are followed in the families.

While I didn’t have too many restrictions, few of the above were still prevalent in the house. But now, I’ve completely shunned them away! Yes, you heard me!

And I don’t feel a hunch that I’m doing something wrong. If my conscious is clear, I don’t think it’s a problem anymore then!

Lots of efforts are being made to spread the awareness, pertaining to hygiene during those days, use of various things available and their side-effects, other products that can be used alongside and so on.

Naari is one such organization making constant efforts to share the word and remove the taboo from the society, instilling confidence in the girls and making them believe there is nothing to be ashamed of, of themselves or their bodies, and tutoring the underprivileged girls about the hygiene and nature-friendly products.

When I read about #PeriodPride on Write Tribe, I knew I had to write on this subject and spread awareness in a way.

“Chemicals like Dioxin which is found in disposable sanitary napkins is a known carcinogen and has been linked to ovarian cancer, abnormal growth in reproductive organs, impaired thyroid and immune dysfunction. Dioxin has even been added by WHO in their list of Dirty Dozen – List of 12 harmful chemicals.”

While spreading the word about the side-effects of sanitary pads, a few alternatives like cotton pads, tampons, and menstrual cups can be used without worrying about their fallouts.

Gone are the days, when women stayed within the four walls of their houses. Today, they are ahead in quite a number of fields and are bringing laurels to their families. If they are ahead in everything, then why should they be left behind in such an important thing as this?!

Don’t you think?

Come on girls, share the post, talk about it and treat it as normal as you can!

Haiku is a traditional form of a
Japanese poetry that consists of 3 lines, following a 5-7-5 syllable rule
(first and third line 5 syllables, middle line 7 syllables). They don’t
necessarily have to rhyme.

It surely sounds like a relief to the people around me but this thing is kind of taking a toll on me. It is affecting me big time.

Sometimes I wonder am I moving towards depression? What is it that is going wrong in my life? Or what is it that is bothering me so much?

Everything, almost everything around me is in good shape and yet I don’t feel that joy. Even if there is a sense of happiness, it is temporary.

I don’t feel like going out, I don’t feel like meeting my friends and even if I do, I barely speak with them and I mostly prefer to stay mum. And yes, I do cry for no reason. Tiniest of things affect me, my sensitivity is at its epitome! All of it is so UNLIKE me! Countless thoughts revolve around the orbit of my brain and it’s difficult to find an escape. These thoughts are usually negative.

I’m turning into a woman I don’t like. My zeal to do things seems to flicker, the emphatic nature that I have seems to fade away, finding joys in others joys seems like a task, I get unhappy with what I have and wish for things (not necessarily materialistic) that others have!

All this is because I’m speaking less. And I don’t really know why! I always have expressed my heart out, talking to people has been my forte, and meeting them and feeling good has always been on my plus side! And now, suddenly, it seems incomplete.

I know it in my heart when I’m back to my usual self, all of this crap will go away!

Not that I have a lot of free time, a lot is going on but that volition to be good, do things, entertain people, be the heart and soul of my friends is languishing.

Yesterday, I met a dear friend after a really long time. And she was busy on her phone mostly and I was bored and thus ended up being on my phone! Again so unlike me!

I was home after being at my mum’s place for a couple of days and coming home meant happiness, it meant seeing my husband after a while. It was bliss. I loved having him around and things were going pretty smooth between us. And yet, I got pissed on such a petty thing. And spoilt my mood. And mind you, he was nowhere at fault. It was all in my head, all the futile, baseless thoughts that I keep having, that botch up everything around me, every time!

Is it depression? Are these the symptoms? Or is it the late-twenty crisis? Or are my planetary situations a bit deviated from their paths (if only there is a sound reason behind it)? I don’t know it yet and I don’t feel like finding out either!

The situation is not that worse, but it’s not good on the other hand! Something is bothering me, I just don’t know it yet!

Does this ring a bell with you? Have you felt something like this? What did you do? How did you escape? You gotta tell me! It really is affecting me!

Sunday, 7 August 2016

As we come towards the finishing line of this enthusiastic BarAThon, all I feel is sheer bliss. The bliss of completing it. The bliss of making connections. The bliss of knowing so many incredible bloggers. I have participated in other challenges as well and have duly fulfilled them in time, but there is something about BAR.

It holds people together, it’s like that magic glue that sticks together everybody and has now tied us all in one big family. Never ever had I thought of having this kind of impact on myself at the end of a challenge.

And what better day it would be than today, Friendships Day, to write the last post of the challenge!

Thank you, BAR! Thank you for being you!

All you BAR-tenders are fabulous people and I're so so so glad to have connected with you... all of

you!

And with this, I make a few promises to myself!

1. Promise to accept things and people the way they are, and not try to change them according to myself.

2. Promise to deliver the best in every possible way when it comes to my work.

3. Promise to embrace the differences with open arms we both share and see every new thing in a positive manner.

4. Promise to laugh off petty things and move ahead with time

5. Promise to love unconditionally and spread its magic.

6. Promise to love me before anyone else. I know it always gets hard and I put others before me and get hurt, every time. Every single time. That’s why I’m making a promise.

7. Promise to not do anything that may harm or hurt people who’re close to me.

8. Promise to value what I have and acknowledge the people behind it

9. Promise to be with you every time you need me!

10. Promise to follow my heart and do things that it always has wanted to do!

Saturday, 6 August 2016

Her day started with snoozing the alarm and yearning to
sleep for 5 more minutes, followed by all the household
chores. Siya then made breakfast and the preparations that came along for
packing a lunchbox for herself and her husband.

Husband worked in the production house.

While Siya’s entire day went busily
at work, handling clients, taking calls, making arrangements, entertaining new
customers and the day passed in a jiffy.

Only to return home and make dinner, eat with husband and
then open her laptop.

A laptop that
unleashed the zillion possibilities, a laptop
that made her dream... to fulfil all the unfulfilled dreams... a laptop that had umpteen tabs opened, showcasing
all the tour packages to travel her country... to travel the world!

Wednesday, 3 August 2016

Don’t we all the lead fragile lives at one point or the other? While walking on the streets, stop for a moment and look around. You will find gazillions of people struggling to make it large, fighting hard to achieve what they haven’t just as yet, and trying to make it work if it isn’t working!

While writing the above sentence, it struck me, aren’t we all living fragile lives ourselves? In a world that requires a quick fix, what keeps us going?

All of us are law abiding citizens, we make money, pay taxes, do not commit a crime, do not harm other living beings, co-operate in every possible way towards making a good society, we’re good people and yet we’re the ones who bear the maximum damage ! Don’t you think?

You will think in a while.

What is it that is ours? Nothing if you look deep! We’re ruled and governed by politicians, we choose them from the existing contenders, the ones who’re comparatively less corrupt. We can’t choose the most corrupt ones for sure, right? And the corrupt free government is yet to come into the picture!

Encircled with everything around us that cannot be trusted, we literally walk on the ashes of fire! The more we bear, the more are the sufferings and in the midst of all of it, those who couldn’t lose everything they once had!

But what can we do? We’re good people!

Bridges collapse, construction sites gets destroyed in the name of natural calamity, roads are filled with potholes, a meagre rain for 20 minutes fills the road with drain, traffic is at its best, while there we have our ministers, sitting on the pile of money that go out of our pockets, they do nothing but eat all of it, build their fancy homes, take umpteen trips abroad, give a life to their children that they never had.

And we? We can’t do anything about it! We continue to hone their money nobbling skills! We sit quiet coz as of now we’re safe, nothing has happened to us or our family members and the rest who’re suffering are the ‘other people’ who had it in their destiny to bear all the sufferings.

And we can’t do anything about it. And yet we’re good people.

Madaari, a recently released movie starring Irrfan Khan, literally moved me. The helplessness of a common man who suffers for no reason is highlighted in the movie. Nobody cares and nothing can be done to fix things that are spiflicated around us. And that literally makes me believe how fragile our lives are!