It is just incredible how many people retain an attorney for their divorce, want it over as fast as possible, but do not do anything required of him or her. Too often clients will call and ask when will it be over, and my snarky retort is: how do I know, I do not even know when you will give me the documents I requested from you and list of facts so that I can pursue your divorce. No matter how great a lawyer you hire is, your lawyer will always be limited by you! If your divorce is not a priority to you, you have your priorities screwed up.

The first most important thing your attorney needs from you in a divorce is your sworn statement of net worth filled in by you. If you drop off a box load of all of your financial documents for your lawyer to fill it in for you, it will cost an arm and a leg. Then when you get your bill and wonder why so much was billed, it’s because you were too lazy to do it yourself. I even afford my clients the ability to type it in by emailing the client the form to email back so we can review, edit, revise and finalize together during an appointment.

Without the sworn statement of net worth, you cannot ask for child support or spousal support or counsel fees to be paid by your spouse. Then, though you did nothing to fill it in for your attorney, you ask your attorney why you aren’t getting any support yet. Look in the mirror. Without the sworn statement of net worth you cannot oppose a request for child support or spousal support or counsel fees and will lose often being ordered to pay more than you should.

When your lawyer asks you for certain documents in triplicate or duplicate, but you only bring one set and or do not collate it, you get billed more for his or her office to make the additional copies and or collate it. When you do not do this timely, it delays the case and it is your fault, but yet you complain that it is taking so long. Without the discovery documents, you cannot prove your claims or disprove your spouse’s claims.

If you do not know the name of the judge presiding over your case, and you do not know the name of the lawyer representing your spouse, and do not know the name of the lawyer for your child(ren) is, clearly you just do not care.

Your divorce is your divorce not your lawyer’s divorce. It does not matter if you do or do not want the divorce. Once it is happening, it is happening. You must make it your priority or risk suffering the consequences.