Marc has his names a bit confused, which is understandable given the esoteric nature of tree octopus cladistics. Thuja plicata is actually the scientific name for the Western Redcedar tree that this octopus calls home. The correct binomial for the octopus itself is Thujoctopus pilosa, named for the lush coating of bluish velvet that it evolved to help retain moisture as it migrated deep inland from its ancestral Pacific home. Unfortunately, this notable trait led to its current rarity.

Originally considered a cheaper domestic alternative to fine velvets imported from Italy or Kashmir, redcedar octopus pelts became popular in the early to mid 20th century with a growing North American middle-class desperate for luxury goods. In particular, evening dresses made entirely of undyed T. pilosa pelts became such a fixture during the post-war period that they were immortalized in the song "Blue Velvet" -- made a hit in 1951 by Tony Bennett and again in the 1960s by Bobby Vinton.

(The song also featured prominently in the 1986 film "Blue Velvet" by director and animal lover David Lynch, who considered it emblematic of the moral degeneracy of suburban middle-class life. Lynch spent much of his childhood in the woods of eastern Washington and was well aware of the devastation brought against the local tree octopus populations by the twisted, fetishistic desires of the suburbs.)

Hyperinventor St. Clair, who is a resident of Puerto Rico (one of the points of the Bermuda Triangle), has been quiet recently. Perhaps he is working on a new patent application that will allow individuals or small groups engaged in Chi Kung breathing to create a harmonic Chi resonance, possibly by following a simple flowchart or instructional diagram, thus enabling large masses to be levitated.

The US Navy is testing their superconducting belt technology on a larger scale, possibly as a means to replace aircraft carriers with flying island airbases capable of traveling back in time and stopping the attack on Pearl Harbor.

Whatever the cause, we can say for certain that the phenomena has caught the attention of the giant white arrows patrolling the Caribbean; let us just hope it doesn't displease them.

Thankfully, Cascadia remains JENGLOT FREE -- but only so long as Yeti immigrants remember to check their fur for JENGLOT and JENGLOT EGGS before boarding Cascadia-bound shipping containers!

ONLY YOU CAN PREVENT JENGLOT INFESTATION!!!

The mummified JENGLOT body the Humans found is ABNORMALLY LARGE and most Mawas JENGLOTOLOGISTS think it is a FAKE created by ANTI-HOMINOID AGITATORS to scare Mawas and other Hominoids! Or perhaps the Human government has GENETICALLY ENGINEERED A SUPER JENGLOT as a BIOLOGICAL WEAPON to DEPOPULATE MAWASISTAN in order to BUILD MONO RAILS ON THEIR LAND!!! My moss is on the latter, especially since Humans are known to be collecting, displaying, feeding, and BREEDING JENGLOT!!!

Whichever is the case, THE DNA TEST CANNOT BE TRUSTED!!! The Human group behind the test are actually CRYPTOPERVERTS who also want to RECOVER DNA FROM MAWAS FOOTPRINTS!!! One can only imagine what sick things they would do with that! Perhaps they wish to CLONE MAWAS FOOT-FETISH SLAVES TO SEXUALLY GAZE AT!!!

In their latest slanderous squeakings against the Mawas, Malaysian Humans are claiming that Mawas are "REVERSE EVOLVED" from proto-Humans! Listen to little SEAN ANG'S insulting squeaks:

I concur with Chow's findings that this could be an unknown species that went through reverse evolution to end up as a less intelligent creature than Peking Man, who could use fire and tools.

LESS INTELLIGENT!?! Then how come not a single Human has EVER beaten a Mawas, Sasquatch, or Yeti in CHESS?!? You can't keep hiding behind FEAR OF DELIMBING as an excuse, regardless of what you see in your ANTI-HOMINOID "STAR WARS" PROPAGANDA FILMS!!! Less intelligent... HUMANS, HEAR MY DERISIVE HOWLS OF LAUGHTER!!! Mawas seem smart enough to evade you pipsqueaks!

And why is your measure of intelligence USAGE OF FIRE!?! There's a reason we don't use fire... IF YOU HUMANS WERE COVERED IN THICK, LUSTROUS FUR YOU WOULD AVOID OPEN FLAMES TOO!!! Just because you are always trying to compensate for being NAKED AND COLD doesn't mean the rest of us are!

AND WE TOTALLY USE TOOLS!!! I have a five-squatch-foot-long log (that's about 20 of your puny Human feet) that I use to SMASH CRYPTOZOOLOGISTS THAT TRY TO TAKE PICTURES OF ME!!! If that isn't tool usage, then tell me WHAT IS!?!

HUMAN ANG SQUEAKS ON:

Reverse evolution can take place when there is an abundance of food and the species group is small and totally isolated, as in the case of the Johor Bigfoot.

GIBBERSQUEAK!!! The Mawas are not "totally isolated"! Just because they don't want to contact you doesn't mean they aren't in contact with the greater Hominoid community! WHY DO YOU HUMANS THINK EVERYTHING HAS TO REVOLVE AROUND YOU!?!

And lastly, evolution, reverse or otherwise, is a HUMAN MYTH!!! Everyone knows that the ancestors of Mawas and Sasquatch WERE EJECTED, FULLY FORMED, OUT OF A VOLCANO FOUR BILLION YEARS AGO!!! Where you Humans came from, I don't know and don't care... JUST STOP PESTERING US!!!

"Red Demon" Giant Squids of Mexico
Jaguars of the Oceans

Join us for an adventure that fewer than 20 divers a year get to experience, an underwater encounter with the Giant Squid (Dosidicus gigas) otherwise known as Red Demon squids in Mexico. Growing up to seven feet long, 150+ pounds and occasionally bigger—possibly much bigger these are the pinnacle predator of the ocean. An apex predator that even sharks stay clear of.

Although the state plans improvements to make the manatee treatment pools work better for the animals, [park manager Art] Yerian's wish list includes a $100,000 monorail system that would allow park officials to slip manatees into slings, hoist them with pulleys and use the rails to move them from the spring run to the holding or treatment pools.

I propose a better, more manatee-friendly, less manatee-cidal, way to get them from pool to pool: a Pneumatic Manatee Distribution System. Given their fusiform shape, you wouldn't even need pods; just stuff them in the tube, close the hatch, and press Send.

...We want to design a mini-robot that will carry a video camera, follow an octopus around under the water, and always keep the animal in the camera's viewfinder. Since the robot will act like a Private Eye and tail the octopus everywhere, we think it should be called Shadow.