I'm crabby about cancer! My blog is the story of my participation in events for Team in Training to raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.
As a Hodgkin's lymphoma survivor from 2002, I want to give something back to show the gratitude that I have for surviving this disease. I completed my sixth Team in Training event in October 2013, and in September 2011, I walked 60 miles to raise money for breast cancer research! I'm living strong!

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Art is Retiring From Team in Training: Forever!

You heard it here first: I am retiring from Team in Training forever! Folding my beloved purple singlet and stuffing it in a drawer. Hanging up the running shoes. Putting away my white TNT cap with the three 26.2 and one 13.1 pins on it. No looking back. No changing my mind. No way!

By tomorrow morning, this will be big news, starting with my interview and extended coverage on ESPN Sports Center. In my press conference, I will blink back tears and tell the world that it is just my time to go. I will thank my teammates and supporters, and answer a few questions from the shocked audience and press corps. Then the other networks will pick the story up: NBC, ABC, CBS, and CNN. “We interrupt this programming for a special bulletin…”

There will, of course, be some statements from teammates. Some of them will get a little choked up, but you will hear things like: “Well, it did seem like he had lost a step lately.” And “I kind of wondered if he was losing his groove when he made that rookie mistake and had sunscreen nearly blind him in Nashville.” And “I hate to see him go, but I guess if he says it’s time, it’s time.” And “Truthfully, he has been kind of a disruptive force on the team lately.”

Out on the streets, women will openly sob quietly and hug one another. They will say things like: “He was such a hottie!” And “I can’t believe we won’t see his amazing physique lumbering down the marathon courses anymore.” Grown men will stare at the ground, shuffling their feet and pretending not to cry, and saying things like: “Dang!” And “I can’t believe he is retiring after all these years!” Little kids will go nuts with sports card trades: “I’ll give you two Derek Jeters and three A-Rods for your Art Ritter in the 2006 Rock ‘N’ Roll Marathon in San Diego!” And Friday night, sports bars all over will do a brisk business as fans everywhere attempt to drown their sorrows. (Please drink responsibly!).

Yep, I’m hanging up the running shoes for good. Of course, expect to see some clips on the news of me out doing laps with some high school cross country runners. Gotta keep the publicity channels open, right? (I’ll be the one doubled over on the ground, gasping for air while I throw up.)

Nope, I won’t be back. Not now. Not next year. Not never. Never-ever! Until, of course, I judge the time is right, and I can get a huge donation and a lot of great press by jumping back into the game. You know that $25,000 donation I was hoping for? I bet I can get double that for LLS with this strategy. Just imagine the headline: “Walmart Agrees to Donate $50,000 to LLS if Ritter comes out of Retirement.” Or maybe a pro-football star will make a huge donation to lure me back? Maybe Peyton Manning or Donovan McNabb? Maybe Tom Brady? Maybe – dare I hope – Brett Favre?

So did I say never? What I really meant to say was, well, you know. So don’t totally rule out seeing me back on the marathon course at some point. Could be Virginia. Maybe New York – turning on those jets down the stretch. Perhaps even pack my stuff and head to Green Bay. Somewhere. Someday. Bank on it – I’ll be back in a purple jersey before too long. Hmmm – purple? Maybe in – Minnesota?

This had me cracking up (and I'm miserably sick right now, so it takes a lot to make me even smile at the moment)!

Out on the streets, women will openly sob quietly and hug one another. They will say things like: “He was such a hottie!” And “I can’t believe we won’t see his amazing physique lumbering down the marathon courses anymore.” <-- BEST PART!!!! ;)

Hi Katie and Elsbeth - sorry for the scare, I tried to let on pretty early that this was a spoof but definitely I could see where there might be a moment of "is this guy really quitting TNT?" No way! Art

Racing for a Cure and Living Strong!

About this blog

Every post prior to July 24, 2008 was written previously and posted in this blog as time allowed, starting in June. These posts describe my preparation for and participation in Team in Training for the 2008 Arizona Marathon. In addition, I've written about the May 2008 Susan G. Komen for the Cure in Richmond, Virginia. Posts from July 24 forward were written in the present, as I race to be a small part of finding a cure for the evil beast known as cancer!

Who Should our Role Models Be?

I believe that every day people doing every day things who are trying to do good in the world should be our true role models, not "sports heroes", actors and actresses, pop stars, politicians, super models, and other celebrities. Let them all do what they do best - which is athletics, acting, music, getting elected, modeling, and acting like celebrities. But unless they are a true role model, let's not pretend that they are simply because they can dunk a basketball or look great in a swim suit or win an Oscar. You and I are role models when we do something good in the world.