Asked about her qualifications for the post, Miss O' Donnell was unambiguous in her response."I know sh*t all. But who cares? It's better giving the job to me rather than waste it on some pencil necked little tight-ass with a squirrel hard-on".

One of O' Donnell's first appointments is to find a location for a new nuclear reactor in the Los Angeles region.

"They can stick that f*cker in Ellen deGeneres garden", said O' Donnell, "imagine the face on her when she wakes up in the mornin' and finds a million tonnes of plutonium floating round her ass".

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