Commuters rejoice at arrival of two more armpits in tube carriage

Commuters on the northern line have begun spontaneously celebrating after learning that two more armpits will be joining their carriage at Tottenham Court Road. The armpits, which belong to a heavily perspiring tourist from California, are expected to contribute significantly to the carriage’s unique atmosphere and sense of community spirit.

“I was slightly worried that I have too much space in front of my face,” commented Jane Young, the member of the tube carriage who is currently closest to the entrance.

“So when I heard that an armpit will soon be filling those 12-13 centimetres, I was pretty happy.”