Stop Texting Your Ex With This Spreadsheet

Breakups are hard, and what's even harder is cutting off communication after it's over. Whether you've thought of the perfect comeback to the last fight you had or you're having an overwhelming urge to reconcile with your ex, it can sometimes feel downright impossible not to pick up your phone and text them what's on your mind. Of course, everyone in your life will tell you that's a TERRIBLE idea, and they're probably right. But because you can't always send your thoughts to a friend, one guy created an online spreadsheet for all those ex-texts you just shouldn't send.

Refinery 29 reports Sean Drohan, a 24-year-old Princeton graduate, is behind the Google spreadsheet called "things I wanna text my ex." It's a place anyone and everyone can go to write down those thoughts you were just about to send your ex before your better judgement took hold. It's also a revealing peek into other peoples' minds post-breakup, something that shows us we're never alone even in heartbreak.

Sean told Refinery 29 he created the spreadsheet because there are things he wants to say to his own exes that he knows he should keep to himself.

"There's plenty I would like to say to my exes (and too much I've already said)," he said. "People enjoy anonymous opportunities to cry into the ether. There's kind of this unanswered question of to whom we say these things and why, but that's what's interesting."

The spreadsheet is an opportunity to get something off your chest when it feels to hard to keep it in. Instead of sending a person your thoughts, this is a safe, anonymous way to say what you need to without unwanted repercussions.

Some people use the spreadsheet to vent about bad exes, or to finally confirm that they are better off without them.

"I hope you've grown up and learned how to treat women with respect," one confessions says.

"Wow, I'm so much better off without you," says another.

Other people are still grieving their relationships on the spreadsheet, penning heartbreaking notes.

"We fell in love with you at a young age, but god damn I still have never loved anybody the way I loved you. I don't think there will ever be a time in my life where you will not be somebody I would still like to be with. I'm scared I won't love anybody else the way I loved you," one person wrote.

Sean points out, holding off on actually texting your ex is a good idea for everyone, so if you feel like you need to, put your words into the spreadsheet first to see if that makes your urge go away. In some cases, it's better not to re-open the lines of communication. This spreadsheet can be a good outlet for that, but if it doesn't help, try talking to a friend about weekend plans or doing something active like working out to distract you until the urge to talk to that person goes away. If you were in an abusive or dysfunctional relationship, texting that person in any way is not good for you because it could put you in a vulnerable position. And if you still feel like you can't stop thinking about communicating with them, try talking to a therapist or a counselor at school to figure out the best way for you to stay safe while you move on.

The spreadsheet is an honest reflection of all the ugly, scary, confusing, empowering and happy feelings that come after a breakup and that's what makes it great. Breaking up with someone feels very lonely and isolating, and it feels like your friends or family don't completely grasp what you're going through. But the reality is we all go through something like that at some point in our lives. To have somewhere where we can honestly vent our feelings is invaluable.