Shahs of Sunset

It seems like every cast member on Shahs of Sunset is done with Asa Soltan Rahmati and her vagueness. No one expects someone to share every single bit of her life just because she’s on a reality TV show, but what do we know about Asa? She has been on this show the whole time and all she has done is sell caftans and try to convince us that diamond water is a real thing. No wonder Mercedes “MJ” Javid is lashing out.

The rest of this cast really bares it all. Sure, it takes a lot of poking and prodding for some of them to actual admit the truth – cough, cough Shervin Roohparvar and Mike Shouhed – but they all end up putting themselves out there for the sake of being real for the show… except for Asa. As expected, MJ did not hold back when she was asked about Asa during her latest Watch What Happens Live appearance and Andy Cohen and Jeff Lewis were living for it.

It doesn’t look like L.A. is missing the Shahs much and I’m pretty sure New York will be happy to get rid of them but first, we have to suffer through Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi’s life-changing, earth-shattering, coming of age bit part in an off Broadway play that she keeps talking about. In case we haven’t been taking her seriously up to this point, she has learned her lines and thus, turned her chaotic life around in one single unpaid job opportunity. To quote Reza Farahan, it only took 35 years.

It is so tough to keep up with Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi. One second she’s single. Then she’s engaged. A minute later she’s married. Then she’s in the middle of a tumultuous divorce after a very short-live marriage with Shalom Yeroushalmi . Now GG is actually dating Shalom again. This is so surprising, yet not at all. The drama just never stops with the Shahs of Sunset cast.

Even Shervin Roohparvar who was a super lovable friend to GG Gharachedaghi last season with no story line of his own is in some deep shit this year. After Tara, a married woman, called out Shervin for sleeping with her. He denied denied denied. Now he’s still denying, but admitting that he did get with a bunch of other girls even though he has a girlfriend.

After the Shahs of Sunset have spent so much time talking about the new and improved Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi, does anyone miss the old GG? You know, the one filled with knife-loving, hair-triggered rage and drama? If that’s the GG you have come to know and love, the good news is that she’s back this episode! The bad news is that all her crazy is overshadowed by all the crazy that her new boyfriend, Shalom Yeroushalmi, has to offer. Sounds like a match made in heaven!

Before we get to that train wreck of a relationship, we still have to sort through another in the form of Mercedes “MJ” Javid and fiancé Tommy Feight. Last week ended with their epic fight about whether or not to knock her up, with Tommy simply asking for some more time for them to get healthy and grow up a little. Of course one would like to think that an engaged couple in their forties that’s been talking about having a baby for over a year would already have figured that all out but this is Shahs, people – don’t go expecting much.

For Shervin’s part, he might be able to see the writing on the wall that alpha crew member Reza Farahan is willing to turn his back on his oldest and closest friend, all because she doesn’t want to tell a bunch of fake friends who call her baby a bastard how she conceived. But most likely, Shervin realizes that someone somewhere has some dirt on him and his cheating ways and it’s easier to fess up now instead of spending multiple seasons being accused, like Mike Shouhed. As for MJ, I’m pretty sure tequila (and a slow decent to complete madness) is what caused her to go off the rails and issue a pregnancy ultimatum to fiancé, Tommy Feight. Spoiler alert: when you issue a man an ultimatum of any form, especially one driven by alcohol and overdramatic, nonsensical tears, it usually doesn’t end well.

The drama from Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi’s breakup with Shalom Yeroushalmi is going on longer than their marriage did. It seems like a cut and dry situation to get divorced after two months, but apparently it’s not!

They didn’t have any kids. I doubt they shared any major assets, yet this man is now looking for spousal support. GG has to be wishing she got a prenup.

I have to admit, when I saw that tonight’s episode of Shahs of Sunset was titled “A Tale of Two Turkeys” I was worried we would spend the episode rehashing the two different versions of events that Mike Shouhed and Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi presented from their fateful cast trip to Turkey a few years ago. I guess I have spent too long following the Shahs but either way, I was relieve to find out that the turkey the title is referring to is just good old fashioned Turkey Day because it’s Thanksgiving on the Sunset. Time to give thanks, right? If by “thanks” I mean gossip, backstabbing and meddling in each other’s business! God, I love the holidays.

We open with Mike and buddy once more Reza Farahan walking their dogs and talking crudely about Mike’s dating life. Who really belongs on the leash here? Anyway, Reza thinks that it’s time that Mike gets back into the dating game and while Mike assures everyone that it’s not for lack of options, he feels like when you have been cheating with someone for 5 years, it’s hard to get back into dating mode. Plus, he’s not technically divorced yet, although that didn’t seem to stop him from dating when he was actually married. Reza is shocked to hear this news, especially since he took the liberty of circling the divorce finalization date in a red sharpie marker on his calendar, signaling that it’s FINAL. I guess because if Reza uses a red sharpie, then all of the mediation, negotiation and litigation that it takes to finalize a divorce gets trumped by a red marker? I can’t understand why Reza is so shocked to hear this but since he has to turn everything into an ulterior motive, he asks Mike if he’s dragging his feet on the divorce because he’s still emotionally invested. Mike maintains that he’s just not ready and who knows, he probably has a full plate with all the baby shoes he selling (or something).

No pregnancy has caused as much of a stir as Asa Soltan Rahmati’s on this season of Shahs of Sunset. From Mercedes “MJ” Javid taking Asa’s pregnancy announcement as a “sign” that she herself should get pregnant to the entire cast questioning the conception of her then unborn baby, Asa’s pregnancy has provided more story lines than she ever has this whole time.

Obviously, this doesn’t sit well with the self-proclaimed Persian Pop Priestess, and she had some choice words for MJ when she and Destiney Rose were guests on Watch What Happens Live.