It has been nearly two weeks since I have completed the TV show. My life has forever been changed. My person and my soul has now been created into a character. My feelings toward life are still the same but I tend to wonder has my course been affected. I have still not left Los Angeles to return for my bicycle trip, yet I have been offered to create my bicycle trip into an adventure for all to see. I love all the people that support me for me. It's hard to encompass how much passion people still have for the right to live. So many people are telling me that they have sold their belongings and are now traveling. It feels so damn good to know people are exploring this world. It's massive and its lands and people are something everybody needs to see.

Since I have been out of Reality TV world it seems like I have entered a very surreal life. I have to ask myself "How did I get here?" and each step I make could lead me to a very different path than the one before. I understand that this was the case before I got involved with this TV bullshit, that every step and action has a positive and negative reaction. I just have to amplify the positive in hopes of achieving more positive. I have to justify why I am doing certain things such as staying in Los Angeles for an extended period of time. I think I can do a lot of good right now. But than again maybe its a pipe dream. But your soul knows where to lead you. You can feel sometimes the energy pull you in the direction you need to go. I am officially letting the positive energy pull me just as I did on the bicycle trip.

I can't be afraid of the outcomes for this is just a step into a place I have never been before. Into the great unknown. That is life in general the Great Unknown, we love to plan the unknown but in all actuality the only thing you can plan for is you waking up. I am happy to still be alive and breathing and being able to put out positive energy is key to my survival. The beauty of all of our survival is the coexistence through good energy and helping others. This is MONUMENTAL for me right now and I am trying to channel all my energy into the right project.

On a side note I have been trying to drink with all my fans. I feel like having a shot and sharing my thoughts makes just that one person a little bit more happy than they were before they got to the bar. On the other my liver is hurting and I need to stick to video blogs and chats for the next week or so. I dearly love you guys but I need to live for more than two years. I love the party and the everything the embodies a good gathering of people but for right now I need to enjoy the soberness of the moment. I need to clear my head and focus. It gets hard sometimes because you get swept up in the whole movement of a society. I want to honestly tell you that I love each and everyone of you guys. All these letters have been sometimes to much to read and it's hard to understand that all of you in some way or another are feeling the same thing. We all share the same feelings on life and that it is only lived one so in saying this do what you every you imagine and never look back. Many people think I want everyone to change and that I hate the ones that are content. You are dearly wrong, I love each person for what they offer to the world and to their communities I just think in some instances a person can sometimes grow his or her surrounding in a positive way by putting a little more energy into the people around them then themselves.

On the topic of Chelsia. I miss her. I miss laying next to her. I miss seeing her everyday. Life is so fucking different after the show and I have been bouncing around like a madman. She is supposed to be moving to Los Angeles which is awesome but at the same time sucks because I am living on couches and in a bar.

This is my life right now, airport to airport. I hope to write more and more. I got some great stories from my trip back in Sarasota.....

FYI....from Schree & Baby (if anybody plans on listening, could you post the highlights of the chat, with thanks in advance!)

Hey everyone I just wanted to let ya'll know that JOSHUAH and SHARON will be on the show hanging out with us TONIGHT at 8pm PST. They will be answering your questions and taking calls about their time in the house and what they are up to now!Please check out our archives at www.blogtalkradio.com/schreeandbaby

Matt will be in Vegas tomorrow with friends and staying until Tuesday.

James returned to L.A. yesterday after visiting his mom and friends for a week in Sarasota, FL. He got another tattoo done while he was at home. I think it's pink and black stripes covering the entire one arm. I will post the picture once I find it again. I forget where I saw it.

Jen and Ryan are about to go on a cruise to the Eastern Carribbean.

Adam is having another big homecoming party next Wednesday at PJ Whelihan's Pub and Restaurant in Cherry Hill, NJ.

From RealityBBQ....Interview with James (original source was not posted):

Do you believe most people are fake while in the BB house?

I don’t think that most people in the house were fake they just came off really superficial. I think that sometimes Big Brother can edit certain people certain ways to make them look utterly pitiful, aka Natalie. But in all honesty I just wanted to bring who I was to the house no holds bar and I think some people added to themselves which was sort of unnecessary, it’s reality TV for god sake it’s supposed to be you not some over the top all time person. Although I was over the top at times but that is actually who I am.

Does religion belong in the Big Brother House?

Does Religion belong in the house? Being an Atheist I… support people’s religious views and I honor their feelings but at the same time don’t try to preach how good you are when in all actuality you have just as many flaws as I do. Own your flaws, and people will appreciate them. I think some people hid their flaws and in doing so short changed the viewer.

Who do you think played the best game strategically?

Strategically this season I think everyone kind of just made up off the cuff what their next move was going to be but the best strategic move was Sheila backdooring Natalie….that was amazing!

Do you think Natalie is crazy with her counting and conspiracy theories?

I think Natalie is Crazy with or without her conspiracy theories……that voice was something else.

Would you have aligned with guys only if you had been playing the game solo?

I would’ve aligned secretly with more women and aligned openly with guys. You have to be picky about how you go about playing both sides. It could ruin your game faster than your attitude.

What would you have done had you been partnered with Neil or Josh? Would there have been any hooking up?

I couldn’t say if I would have hooked up if I was paired up with either one. I am not saying no and I am not saying yes I just wasn’t given that opportunity. I think we would’ve been nixed sooner because we were two guys in a team instead of how they looked as girls as dead weight.

Do you think Josh would have stayed true to your alliance, or was he just playing everyone he could?

Everyone has to play everyone to stay in that house at one point or another. So when I heard he cut a deal with Ryan I wasn’t surprised.

When you received your HoH basket, what one thing were you happiest to get?

I was stoked to get pictures of my friends and of course Andrew WK…that CD amped me up for everything.

When you were voted out were you sad or relieved?

I was fucking relieved when I was voted off. At that moment I had accepted my fate and I just wanted to see Chelsia.

What was it like in the Jury House?

Relaxing, a lot of reading and a lot of smoking. Movies galore….no one really cared, I wished they were like that in the house.

Who do you think played the best game competitively?

I don’t want to sound goofy but I think me and Natalie where the only ones to push are bodies to the extreme. I think that is what makes for good television and I wish they had more physical endurance stuff in the show.

Who do you think played a horrible game and you’d like to slap some sense into them?

I think Jen played a horrible game due to the fact she was so cocky in the beginning. I think her picture remark sunk her game but what can you, do she had the moment power and I think she got caught up in it.

What were your biggest mistakes and best moves while on the show?

My biggest mistake was starting a relationship

What was your proudest moment and what do you regret that you did in the house?

My proudest moment was hanging on that disco ball and basically showing the whole house I belonged.

What were your favorite and least favorite competitions?

Favorite Comp would have to be the disco ball, and least favorite would have to be the More or Less competition.

If you could pick anyone from the house, which would you have liked to have been final 2 with?

Chelsia.

Which one houseguest would you like to have won, OTHER than yourself?

I would’ve liked to see Chelsia win if couldn’t win, that was my girl. I think she got a bullshit deal and I think she handled herself the best that she could’ve for that week. Everyone said they had her back but than I won the POV and the house flipped.

If you had won the $500k, what would you have done with the money?

Bought a house for my mom. And Produced my own travel/bicycle show. I would try to bring people out of their holes to travel with me for a week or a day.

What was the finale like? Were you shocked at how many fans were there, and winning the $25k?

I was dumbfounded by how many people were there it was so good seeing my best friend Nathan and being brought back down to Reality. The 25,000 took me by surprise. I love everyone for that blessing. I was able to help pay off my mom’s car and get some new ink which is today!

Was EvelDick nice to you at the finale and wrap party?

EvelDick was awesome to me at the finale and the wrap party, we ended up in Vegas.

Were you surprised to hear that Adam had lost his job while in the house?

No…

What was the first thing you did when you got out of the house and away from the show?

I went to Bar 107 with my buddy Nathan and got replenished on my much needed Pabst Blue Ribbon Fix.

How has the transition from being in the house to being on the outside been? Have you had anyone ask you for your autograph, or long lost family members appear?

The transition has been enigmatic. I love the fans and not being watched 24/7 is nice. I miss always hanging with Chelsia but that about it. Tons of people are asking for my autograph. I love making people happy. As you guys know I am giver more than a receiver.

How has the show affected what you’re doing now, if at all? Has it opened any doors, or closed any doors, or just given you ideas on new things you want to try? What are you doing now that you’re out of the house?

The show has garnered me a larger audience for free thinking people. The show has also brought me to a new plan of appreciation for the people that surround me. Have doors opened, Hell Yea, only because the fans want to know what’s next. Well I am working on a TV show where I bicycle around the world and meet with people and show people how to use couchsurfing.com and other vagabond websites to travel. LA is meetings but for the most part its fun. I just got to keep a level head and realize I am just a kid still.

What’s going on between you and Chelsia? I heard she’s having a hard time with the gay porn issue… is that true? Would YOU like to pursue a real relationship with her?

Chelsia and I are wonderful. She just moved to LA and we are still friends. I appreciate her and what she stands for she is truly an amazing girl and I hope that in the future we can work on a long lasting bond. I think we already have that but to work on a relationship at this time is hard. I don’t have the time as I did in the house to dedicate to her. She deserves all the time in the world and when that time comes to be able to step back and give it to her hopefully she is their if not I hope to be amazing friends with her. With the whole porn ordeal she handled the fact I did porn fine but the fact I lied and said one instead of a couple it hurt her I couldn’t trust her. We were sequestered and I didn’t want to confide everything. I feel bad and I think that is something I regret. I am not proud of my path but it has brought me to where I am. Imagine having your darkest secret blown out for all of America. All I can do is laugh and learn to grow from it.

Have you kept in touch with anyone outside the house (other than Josh and Chelsia)?

I really haven’t kept up with anyone, my number is online and I am not charging 50 bucks to call me so anyone can call me. I honestly hope to keep in touch with a few people but 16 people is rather two much for me to handle, although I’d rather deal with my fans.

Were you surprised with the edit CBS gave you on the show? How would you want to change it?

I honestly haven’t been able to see the show, I’ve been so busy. I am sure when I see it I will be happy. Obviously America was.

Do you have anything to say about the whole gay porn thing?

It was something I did, It was something that was my secret, and it is something that will forever be for public viewing. I did it, I am not proud of it but am I ashamed of it Fuck No.

Do you plan on watching the replay of the feeds or the TV episodes?

When I get a chance to breath I will try to catch up on it.

Who are your role models in your life?

At this point I can only model myself as myself, no one really stands for anything of great importance nowadays.

Do you have any aspirations to act?

I can act, but nothing has come my way. But doesn’t every reality TV personality think they know how to act….

WHEN you are chosen for All-Stars (if it happens, you’ll be there!), who from past seasons (or BB9) would you like to be in the house with?

I really don’t want to say for I might have my cover blown even before entering the house.

Would you do another reality show, like Amazing Race?

If you guys want me to do the Amazing Race get me on and I am game! Chelsia and I would probably kill it. Or team me up with anyone I would love to do that show. EvelDick??

Is there anything else you want to set the record straight on?

You guys pretty much got me for me. I am who I am and I appreciate your views but for the most part I am not changing for no one but myself. And I don’t think I need to change anytime soon. Maybe my drinking habits in time but I am still just 21.

To get on BB did you submit a video by mail, attend an open casting call, or did your agent get you on?

I got drunk in a bar in Brooklyn called Duff’s, they were casting there for some reason that night and it just so happened I walked in got drunk and did an interview…the rest is history.

If you could give some advice to someone applying for BB10, what would it be?

Be Real, don’t go in there over the top imagine playing that character all the time. Just be real and bring them some kick ass true stories.

I WANT TO TELL EVERYONE I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT RESPONDING TO ALL THE EMAILS AND INTERVIEWS ADDRESSED TO ME ON MYSPACE! I love all my fans and friends and never want to disappoint anyone by not returning an email, photo request, or interview but please know I am trying and will get to everyone soon. I am going camping today till next week to try and clear my head and get a game plan for my life. When I am back I promise I will be writing blogs, chatting in chat rooms, and responding to everyone that has written me. I love everyone that has supported me and continue to take interest in my life, just know I will get back to you soon.

Just found out that Josh, Sharon and Jacob will be in Vegas over the 4th of July. I'm assuming Chelsia will be too, to use her Vegas trip prize that she won on BB. And I bet James will be there as well, probably will be a reunion of the Team Pink alliance. As soon they post pictures from that trip, I will post them.

I love ya too Will, I just can't gt my mind set for the next BB ya know? lolIf the cast is good, this fan vs favorites thing, then yes it will/should hold my interest especially if its other contestants "favs" like from Survivor and such

Ok this is my latest draft of my customized t-shirt of Josh. I like what I've done so far but the only thing I want to change is the number 9 in the logo from red to black. If I could do it, then it's good to go! LOL

Ok this is my latest draft of my customized t-shirt of Josh. I like what I've done so far but the only thing I want to change is the number 9 in the logo from red to black. If I could do it, then it's good to go! LOL

Ok this is my latest draft of my customized t-shirt of Josh. I like what I've done so far but the only thing I want to change is the number 9 in the logo from red to black. If I could do it, then it's good to go! LOL

Is this ok?

Let me know if you want anything tweaked/changed

Thanks, I'm gonna try that. It might need to be sharpened bolder but let me see if it's fine on the shirt first.