The worst toilet experience of my life (so far)!!!

Before I tell you about my time in darling Darjeeling… I have to share with you the worst toilet experience of my life (so far). I say so far because I know I still have a long time on the road and know even after this adventure it won’t be my last… I am sure I will have many more. I honestly though never thought I would be writing a post about a toilet experience of mine. About squat toilets maybe, but an experience no.

You see before getting to India I honestly had no clue how to use squat toilets. The 1st time I encountered one was in Chefchaouen, Morocco and I remember clearly walking in gasping getting scared and almost turning around until I realized I just had to pee. The 2nd time I encountered one and actually had to use it was in Essaouria, Morocco. I remember going in the toilet, closing the door and seeing hooks on the back of it. I thought, the hooks must be for my jeans and underwear. So I stripped down did my business got dressed and went on with my life.

It wasn’t until I got to India that I had to face my fear of having to use them often & actually learn how to use them properly. My 1st encounter in India with one was when I got to Mathura, India for Holi and our room had one. Lucky for me I was traveling with Carolin (you remember her from Hamburg). Carolin had spent many months in India and well was a pro at the squat toilet thing so answered a few of my questions. 2 things I never understood about squat toilets:

1 How do people use them without taking off their bottoms to not get anything on them?

2 How do they clean themselves with out any toilet paper?

She answered the 2nd question and showed me the 1st one as you can see. Yes lovely Val took a photo of her showing me how to use the squat toilet. After that using a squat toilet was a breeze and over the next 6 weeks I have become a pro at using them. Seriously as long as you have toilet paper you are golden. I mean really most of the public toilets I have had to use are disgusting and I wouldn’t want to put my ass on any of them anyway. So squatting and taking care of business makes it much easier, because yes you are uncomfortable, but not touching anything. It’s a win win and well that brings me to my story.

—

Val & I spent a week in the mountain town of Darjeeling and through out that week both were sick on and off with stomach problems. I am pretty sure I used the toilet more during that week than the rest of my time in India combined. I will tell you more about that and everything we did in darling Darjeeling in my next post for now I am getting straight to the story.

—

We left the Guest House for dinner and headed down the mountain to a little pizzeria we had gone a few days before that we both liked, but didn’t have a toilet. On the way down I told Val I was not feeling good and think I need to go. She said “Jaime should we go back?” I thought “fuck we already walked all the way down here” so told her, “no I will find a toilet down here.” A bit ahead of the pizzeria was a big hotel so I told her I would go in and ask to use it there.

I walked in & saw a guy sitting there I asked him if I could please use the toilet. He said yes and pointed it’s down that way. I rushed down that way… I could barely hold it any longer, but now was just at the reception with 3 people looking at me. I asked them “yes the toilet please…” one of the ladies said “no we don’t have toilets?” I said, “Excuse me? You don’t have any toilets?” She said “no we don’t” I said, “Please it’s an emergency I will pay you… 10… 50 Rupees”. She said, “No we don’t have any I am sorry”. I then got pissed and said “you are telling me you don’t have a single toilet in this hotel?” She said “exactly”. I looked at her in the eyes and mouthed “FUCK YOU” and ran off. I was about to explode… as I walked out the wind helped me make it an extra dramatic exit by slamming the door for me.

There I was in the middle of the street with nowhere to go. I knew I could not make it back to the Guest House. Then I saw what looked like public toilets right across the street. I walked in and saw 4 squat toilets filled with shit & all disgusting… I didn’t mind that, what I did mind was that none of them had a door. I looked up and down and thought “fuck… okay I have no choice”. I thought, “disgusting toilet with no door no problem… just please God do not let anyone walk in on me”. I went to the last one because I thought that would give me the most privacy of the 4 if someone walked in.

And then there I was in the squat position when I heard someone walk in… I thought “FUCK okay I know they must be able to see my head so they won’t come back here.” I heard the footsteps coming. Then I looked up and there he was a little old man right in front of me starring at me. I quickly moved one hand to cover my crotch and another to hold myself because I was about to fall back from the shock. I stared at him and was speechless. I literally couldn’t say a single word… but was about to start crying. He then moved to the toilet next to me and took care of his business. He must have stood there in front of me for not even 10 seconds, but seemed like a lifetime.

I couldn’t believe it… I just couldn’t. Because I was sick I was there longer than I wanted to and the whole time I was just cursing India, cursing travel, cursing the inventor of squat toilets and who ever designed a public toilet for 4 with out doors.

After taking care of business I walked to the Pizzeria walked in and Val looked at me and said “no luck?” I told her “yes, but am about to cry… I can’t believe what happened and just need a minute”. After dinner I was feeling a bit better and Val & I went for a nice cup of tea.

—

So yup that is it… a man watched me taking care of business and I almost cried. I mean really I have had to use many crazy disgusting toilets around the world, but this was hands down the worst. Traveling the world has made me accept that we live in a world with disgusting toilets, but not in a world with door less toilets or one where someone will watch you as you go. When any human is taking care of business they should have the privacy of 4 walls and no one should watch… but than again I am in a country where people shit on the side of the roads and everyone can watch… like it’s no big deal. Ahhh India!!!

—

So yeah I would love to hear what you think about this. Oh & since I shared with you my worst toilet experience go ahead and share with me your worst toilet experience.

Comments

Hahahaha ohmygod…NO DOORS?!?! I mean, really, why?! And why was the old man staring at you? You should’ve taken advantage of the situation and added it to your XXX travel list …..ewwwww.

Squat toilets…they do take a bit of getting used to, but it does feel cleaner in a way. I’d rather use a regular western loo any day, though. Especially the ones with doors.Waegook Tom recently posted..Cappadocia: Land of the Cock Rocks

I know WT I couldn’t believe it… NO DOORS, but I had no choice & then this happened… ugh yeah I wanted to cry. Oh & no he wasn’t cute enough for me to take advantage of the situation. Plus I have a man in Cairo, so don’t need anything…lol!!! Oh & yes a clean western toilet with a door is a toilet I would take any day.

As a girl, I have always thought squat toilets were much more comfortable than western toilets. Even if I try to squat on Western toilets, they are so high up that it’s hard not to have the occasional contact with the dirty toilet seat. I’m always having this conversation about squat toilets every time Scott and I travel in the US.Christy recently posted..Travel Shot: Stars Run Circles Around the Sky

Oh yes, I got used to squat toilets in Japan (but they are CLEAN!) that look like urinals on their backs. Shaun nearly died of a panic attack when we were in Oaxaca. His pants ended up with water on them (or so he was telling himself that) after going to the bathroom with 2-3 inches of water on the floor in the gazebo. He still shudders.Erica recently posted..Video: Tango in San Telmo

Oh, Jaime, that is horrible. How odd that he stood there and watched you! I wonder if he was a pervert or this is just somewhat normal behavior for that area. Squat toilets are indeed quite the experience, especially if they’re not clean. In Middle Eastern countries every squat toilet, even those in remote areas, have an accompanying hose with powerful water pressure that people use to clean themselves after they go. I’m sure you noticed this in Egypt. In India don’t they have these hoses?Sabina recently posted..The Oddest, Coolest Restaurant on Earth – The Genesis Pub in Luxor, Egypt

That is what I thought Sabina, how odd & why??? I think he was just intrigued that a western guy was in the PUBLIC TOILETS USING THE SQUAT. That is what I keep telling myself. I’m lucky enough to not had to experience many ST in Turkey or Egypt… only during bus stops & I would never have to use them just pee so it saved me the humiliation of using them all wrong…lol!!!

I’m sorry, that’s terrible, but it makes for a really funny story!
Japanese people love old school squat toilets as well, though I can kind of understand why. I usually choose them if the restroom doesn’t look very well kept.

My worst was also in India, on a 14 hour overnight bus ride…
The bus stopped for a bathroom break. An Indian woman and I started following some signs until we saw one in the shape of an arrow that apparently said “women” (she translated for me). My eyes followed the arrow to see a tarped off area of a field. I walked over to see if it was a walkway to the toilets, but no. It was just … mud. There were no designations whatsoever so when I say mud, I mean that you couldn’t tell mud from, well, not mud. Since there was no door, I told her that I would keep watch first. That’s when I realized that the lights actually shone into the tarped off area and created shadows of the people inside and everyone could see the poor woman popping a squat in the middle of a field. I just about died right then and there.Erica recently posted..Happiness is…

Pobrecitooooo!!! I had it coming out of both ends in Tibet in a public bathroom with NO walls and it was squat too. Worst day of my life EVER.Andi of My Beautiful Adventures recently posted..PrintRunner Giveaway & Postcard Announcement

That just sounds awful! I’ve read that a lot of public bathrooms in China don’t have doors for the stalls, and the recommendation seems to be to bring an umbrella so you can open it up to use as a shield so people don’t see you doing your business. I did have to use squat toilets a few times in SE Asia but never for #2 since the hostels had western toilets. What you just wrote about is one of my worst nightmares. I know you’ve read my fear of squat toilets post. I hope the mental anguish doesn’t haunt you for too long.Ali recently posted..Difficult Travel Experiences in Southeast Asia

Bringing an UMBRELLA ummm that is GENIUS. Thanks for sharing that Ali. For real… don’t plan on traveling through China yet (so not ready), but now I know. Oh & yes I remember your fear of ST post… I still have no clue how they wet themselves & how it dries?

Jaime! WOW! I literally covered my mouth reading the end of your post! I would have been mortified with a public squat toilet situation when I REALLY had to go. Another person in there is one thing but to have someone watch you?! That’s definitely the first time I’ve read something like this! Andi’s story above sounds rough!

That’s pretty humiliating — sorry you had to experience that! The weird part is the guy just stared at you. So strange. I’ve used squat toilets before in Uganda … it poses a whole different set of problems for women trying to take care of business during a certain time of the month and remain balanced and all. But — thank God — there was a door!The Time-Crunched Traveler (Ellen) recently posted..Brewery of the Month: Thomas Hooker Brewery

Ellen it really was, I mean it happened so fast & I just was so lost I couldn’t react to him. Oh I can only imagine what squat toilets in Uganda can bring & I don’t even want to imagine what you just mentioned. WOW!

Fun….. Don’t go to China because in their bus station’s they have things I can only term “Trough toilets” which involve a trough running the length of the bathroom (with no flushing mechanism) that you squat over in similar doorless stalls. Some lucky worker gets to brush it out at the end of the day…

I don’t mind squatters (with doors) so much as they’re far more hygenic than what we’re used to but man oh man do they suck when you’re sick to your stomach…

If it makes you feel better, I’m sure people have much different standards of modesty there than we have back home…Aaron @ Aaron’s Worldwide Adventures recently posted..I’m Going to Iraq!

OMG AARON… I had to re-read your comment. That is crazy about the toilets in China. I mean really I think everyone in the world deserves privacy when using the toilet. Yeah I don’t mind Squatters anymore they really are much more hygienic and better for you anyway. Oh & I know people have different standards of modesty than at home, but toilet modesty should be standard around the world…lol!

Jaime, as you know I have done some traveling myself and boy, do I have some toilet stories. Some very embarasing, funny, cried my eyes out or painful. That is why I am so freaking cracking up as I read your strory and reminense about my toilet experiences. I have stopped counting those experiences but I do have some memorable ones. I will tell you my most embarasing one in person but I can tell you about the funniest ones. I was up in the mountains in Oaxoca, Mexico and had to use one of the towns people out house. OH my DISGUSTING, probably similar to a squat toilet. Crap was already piled up with flies swarming and the smell horrendous. But like a good trooper, I had to make the best of it and cry later with shame. As always I make sure the area is clean before I sit/squat no matter the OUTCOME situation. As a squated, the flies come towards me and fly around me and land on my face and parts of my body as I do my business. I cant move and try to make them go away or else i would fall or have mess all over me. Finally, it was over and I walk out of the outhouse and everyone is staring at me like they knew what I have been through. I think I was there maybe four day but only went that one time and the rest was all urine time.

OMG MY MOUTH IS OPEN… wow just wow… I don’t think I could have handled that. I would have gone in the open behind a tree or something. Gosh toilet experiences are crazy and crazy how some you just will never forget.

Wow. Just wow. My entire 2 weeks in India I managed to avoid any embarassing toilet incidents AND avoid squat toilets. May God was looking out for me? Being half-Japanese I’m in Japan all the time, so I have used them there quite a bit. I’ll even admit that sometimes I still take off my pants and underwear because I just don’t trust myself to remain poised and balanced without falling over and crapping on myself. LOL.

Maybe the older guy was starting at you because he was just as shocked as you? I’m sure he knew it was possible someone was in there, but maybe he was surprised it was a 20 something foreigner?David recently posted..Montreal – Winter Wonderland

David!!! You are lucky you didn’t have to go through anything like this in India… Oh & thank you for mentioned that of taking off your pants & underwear… sometimes I still want to take them off for that reason, but don’t have the option in most ST i use. I think that is why he starred at me… cus I mean really what foreigner would be using the locals public toilets… well a sick one I guess.

What a horrible experience. I think I would have booked the first flight out of there. I have never had a desire to go to India, and it’s a good thing because I am quite certain I could not handle the toilet situation. There are nasty toilets in Latin America, but they usually do not have shit all over, and they have doors.

Stephanie, oh trust me I wanted to leave so bad, but just couldn’t I knew I still had a bit more of India I wanted to see & am glad I didn’t leave. As for India there is more to handle than just the toilet situation it’s just a crazy hard country to travel in. After I am done here… I don’t think I will ever have a desire to come back.

The only time I’ve used a squat toilet was in Turkey. They have these hoses that you are supposed to clean yourself with (I assummed that’s what they were for) but I always carried packets of tissue with me. The ones I encountered were not that bad.

Hahahahaha great story!
Still can’t believe that creepy old guy sat there and stared at you… Some people are very weird…
But as you can see many others have had bad experiences using a squat toilet.

In Greece (where I grew up) in every school they have this kind of toilets because they claim they are more hygienic (yeah maybe if they actually clean them!). I hated using these toilets so I trained myself not to go to the toilet from 8:00-14:00 from Mondays to Fridays So I never had a bad experience because I never used them… Well that was until the summer of 2009 when my friends and I went camping in Matala (a really nice place to visit if you ever go to Greece).
The toilets in the camping ground where disgusting and yes they were squat toilets… One morning I had to use one, not for a #2 or a #3 thank god! (you will understand later…)
So I go inside, try not to lose a flip-flop as the floor is sticky and after i flush the toilet…. Then it happened…. I don’t know why but all the water (and my #1…), instead of going down, started to come upwards with a force and I got wet up to my knees. My sister was waiting outside and when I came out she looked at me and started laughing while I was running to find the showers. Needless to say that was the last time I ever used a squat toilet.Nicole recently posted..The day my IQ score dropped to zero

Thanks Nicole, yeah I guess bad toilet experiences are UNIVERSAL…. they are going to happen. I have learned to love squat toilets they really are so much better…lol I know crazy but I guess after 3 months in India I am so used to them. OMG YOU EXPERIENCE SOUNDS CRAZY TOO… wow…lol!!! Wow just wow, yeah glad that has never happened to me… but look we both survived…lol!!!

Hi,
ha ha ha,,..m sure u r still having nightmares bout it..
(pardon me, English isn’t my first language, so u might find some mistakes)
i am from India,n yes am used to squat toilets,ppl usually have both the types of toilets at home, n they r a million times cleaner than the ones u find outside…
using public toilets is a nightmare(especially with all the graffiti on the wall,colorful basins,a broken stained mug beside it n not to forget all the wonderful aroma emanating from someone Else’s pile of shit!!!!!!!),n wen ever i travel i make sure i never use one even if it meant being constipated a day or two..

my wonderful experience(be glad that yours isnt tis bad):-..during my childhood days my family used to visit tis temple every year in the middle of nowhere,it was sort of a tradition,…the place consisted of just the temple, a few retail shops and a few rooms for the pilgrims to stay,…there were no toilets,..n v had to take care of our business out in the wild,..
it was no less than an adventure,first u gotta get up 5 in the morning , take a torch,walk into the wild ,watching every step of yours making sure u don’t step on someone Else’s dung,..find a good place …
the best part was, there were atleast 100s like u trying to do the same, so it was better to cover ur eyes than ur crouch while u r at it n imagine no one walks by,…
,..i had to put up wit tis humiliating crap for 2 days every yr ..it was some 15-20 yrs ago,..

n ppl rarely use the public toilets,(n never the ones without doors) n to find a foreigner in one might be quite shocking for him,,…well, atleast he dint take out his cell phone and take pic n post in on some blog similar to tis writing his experience bout witnessing such a rare phenomena

well,jokes apart,..i feel sorry for you, n i apologize on behalf of the creepy old guy,…India is a nice place to travel provided u get used to certain things…

OMG Bharath jajaja yes your story is worse then mine… wow!!! Oh I will never forget this… it was just so damn crazy!!! Yeah I’m happy he didn’t take a photo of me jajaja… that would have been so much worse. Oh don’t apologize it wasn’t your fault. Yeah India has given me so many story to write about… ahh I hated it so much yet loved it at the same time.

I have not read all responses but if you google for scientific benefits of squatting vs western toilets, squatting is lot better (Also google for incidences of colorectal cancers in western population vs Asian population). Majority of the things designed by western civilization for making life easy are now getting proved to be rather problematic for health.http://www.relfe.com/toilet_seat_constipation.html is just one example.

Thanks Noel, yes I’ve actually heard it’s much better to squat than the western style… and I actually think the more I use the squat the more I like it. Its a strange feeling, but I’ve gotten use to it.

When I was in China, I was on an overnight train from Xian to Shanghai and was sick – from both ends!

To make matters worse, it was the most disgusting toilet I had ever seen with black water from not flushing properly and I spent the entire 14 hours running between the toilet and the sink. I thought I was going to die. Then I had the stewardesses laughing at me while I was vomiting in the hand basin.

The worst of it though was when the toilet paper ran out!!

I still have nightmares about this – it almost made me want to never travel again!

Thanks for your blog too by the way – I am in love with all your stories and they are making me so excited for mine and my hubbys back packing trip next year!!!

OMG DANIELLE… wow just wow, I am in shock from reading your story. That is so much worse. Like so much worse. Man I don’t miss having to travel with a role of Toilet paper everywhere. Glad you are going to be back on the road soon!!!