Ever since I can remember I’ve had a connection with this guy. My mother said it was unusual for someone so young to believe in such a deep and mature love, especially when I never watched movies that showed that kind of love and my dad was very abusive and unloving. I also could see spirits and talk to them but no one believed me.

Anyways, when I was 17 I was living a not so good life. I was having sex with multiple people and was on a path of selfishness. I didn’t care about what I was doing until one night I heard a loud clear male voice say, “You’re not on the right path!” I felt like I was being scorned by someone, maybe God? I don’t know.

Well, that night I went to sleep and I felt my body being lifted up into total darkness. I heard, “Don’t be afraid. We’re working on you.” It felt like I was on an operation table (weird, I know but I will say what I think happened later).

The next morning I woke up semi paralyzed and in a lot of pain. I had pools of saliva coming out of my mouth and my right eye was swollen. I was covered in a severe rash that burned and itched like crazy. My mom took me to the emergency room. The doctors weren’t sure what was wrong but that voice came back saying that if I changed my ways I’d be healed in three days. I did and I was.

Then the visions of the boy I saw as a child started getting clearer. I was told he is the one for me but warned it would be a struggle with him. I didn’t care and wanted to meet him. I was told I’d meet him in 3 days.

So during this time a girl moved to my state and city and messaged me on Facebook asking to be friends. I started hanging out with her and she pushed this guy on me, saying I shouldn’t deny him because he could be the one and even made me prank call him! He spoke to both of us but kept saying there was something about my voice and he was dying to know who I was. I eventually told him and he wanted to hang out. I said sure forgetting it had been three days and he could be the guy. Strangely the thought never crossed my mind until I locked eyes with him for the first time.

When we first locked eyes I was overcome with this strange feeling of I’ve known him forever. He looked exactly like the guy in my visions and I felt like I was coming home. It was like I was dead before I met him. He said he felt the same and we started dating.

A lot of synchronicities happened. He thought the same thoughts like the name John reminds me of the color white. I keep dreaming of the letter k, etc. Weird stuff like that.

Well, I started to feel afraid and questioned him even though all was like a fairy tale between us and I’ve never felt so happy in my life!

I started thinking he wasn’t the one and began pushing him away and literally running from him. He chased me down so many times, crying asking why I kept pushing him away and wondered why I couldn’t feel the connection between us. He said he was devastated when I broke up with him for no reason other than my own fears that this was all a lie. I was trying to protect myself but he thought he wasn’t good enough.

This went on for over a year and eventually things got so bad he thought I cheated and left me for this German exchange student who fell in love with him. He kept coming to see me while he was with her but I kept cussing at him and said some harsh stuff so he stopped. He said he’ll never love again and will always love me forever.

I had a dream about Germany before he met that girl. I thought I was going to move there. It was him who did. He was there for a few months but I kept hearing he’d come back to me in September. He did.

So the second time we got back together I was triggered even more and we both had changed a lot. I found out I was abducted by aliens and he said the same before I ever told him. That is a Long story but during this time of separation I found out about twin flames and star seeds, indigos and crystals etc.

Well, things got weirder between us and I was told my lesson with him was unconditional love. I was told I needed to accept my greatest fear being killed and eaten. Nothing scared me more than murder, mutilation, and cannibalism. I never told anyone this, not even him.

Well, when he came back to me he kept randomly saying he was going to kill me and eat me. He said if his leg was ever amputated he would save it and eat it just to try it. He kept showing me this disgusting site of people who cut off certain body parts. He thought it was funny. I found it disturbing. I can’t even watch horror movies. I’m so sensitive to violence even if it’s fake. I could never understand the appeal. I never told him any of this but still, he kept randomly saying stuff like this.

He started saying he would still kiss me if I was dead and he wanted to taxidermy my body. It was disturbing but for some reason, I wasn’t afraid of him and kept telling him I loved him unconditionally. He got super angry and yelled, “Unconditional love isn’t real! Everything has conditions!”

That hurt me. He said he didn’t believe what I believe and that he would kill someone for a million dollars. I was shocked he could be so evil. My whole life has been me trying to be perfect and good. I have always wondered why there is this ‘duality’ and yin yang stuff. I have gotten so deep into it. He looked at me randomly one day and said: “You’re too deep for me.”

Things got so bad that we broke up again back in 2014. He immediately looked for someone new, told this new girl she was his twin flame and that he loved her unconditionally and has been with her ever since. It hurts and I’m confused. I wonder if she knows the real him, the evil him.

I knew I would see him at the store one night because I had stabbing pain in my heart. I was right I saw him. He pretended like he didn’t see me. I saw his aura. It was large and black. It’s been 3 years. I want to let go but it’s hard.

Such a heartbreaking story. You surely would never know the truth behind the whole twin flame story. It is a mystery that can be discovered by those who are on a mission, searching and connected to the source.

At times I think the Divine one can send a counterfeit twin just to release you from suffering, soul captivity.

Looking at your story from the beginning, you have some connection with spirits of some sorts and those need serious attention. You should check if they are God’s or not. Anyway, all things works together for our own good. God made everything beautiful in its time so even this situation will create or is creating its own beauty within you whether it emanated from good or evil.

See it like a cocoon with a butterfly within going through a molding phase. You will come out of all this beautiful like a butterfly and you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall.

I have been through the same confusion and I am becoming a better version of myself after experiencing a near death pain because of my so called twin. Though he found me spiritually grounded but not content with life and love.

I used to have suicidal thoughts because of the joy I never had since I was born. My twin was from another country and he spoke a different language from mine. I was calling myself a Christian when we met and going through a healing process using a spiritual healing book “Breaking Free” by Beth More and “Awakening the Heroes Within” by Carol S Pearson. My healing path was orchestrated in steps because after my twin relationship separation an awakened soul/light worker was sent to help me continue the soul healing process and deal with my twin’s loss.

Letting go of obsession was not easy. While in the process, a soulmate was sent and we are so similar in many ways starting from sharing names, similar material things, cosmetics, food, allergies, spiritual views, sicknesses, divorces, conception struggles, thoughts, life perceptions and experiences etc. As a person you just see that your life is not within your control at all.

Twin flame pain cuts deep within but you will heal. Your soul will cry a lot, you have to grieve but make sure that you allow God to hold you together otherwise serious health issues can be experienced. Try to seek the true God and let go of all connections you have with spirits that are not of God. We attract who we are. Let your inner soul awaken and show you the true path you have to follow. You will mature a lot and what you’re going through now will be used as part of your own ministry.

Unconditional love first starts with us doubting the reason for our existence and also doubting God’s love for us. God will put you through experiences where you ultimately will be in his shoes, where you are compelled to love another imperfect being fully without even understanding why you have to tolerate all the lies, pain, manipulation and abuse. You lose yourself in the process.

But looking at the way you’re able to love and forgive that human being over and over shows you that no matter how much we sin against God he loves us deeply, even when we doubt his love and the reason for our existence he still loves and welcomes us back into his loving arms. He doesn’t count our sins against us. Just think of the pain you are experiencing is because of love, then relate it to the pain that we are putting God through. Remember that God is love and so we manifest love in our daily dealings.

Yes, even the so called evil twin soul flame can be used as a mirror for our souls, just for us to see our behavior towards God, ourselves and others. We can call them evil as much as we want but they are not. They just didn’t orchestrate their arrival in our lives. So hate not thine twin.

At times it is for us to see how badly we are treating ourselves by not loving and accepting ourselves unconditionally. We tend to be so hard on ourselves and set high unachievable standards. When we don’t measure up to those set perfect standards we then torture our souls. We don’t say beautiful things to self and we destroy the self through words, addictions and lack of care. Loving ourselves means being completely patient, gentle and kind with ourselves, allowing ourselves to go through a steady process of growth and self-love. We will never be able to love another being if we fail to love ourselves first. We cannot give love that we don’t have.

Don’t take it like you were attacked by aliens or demons just embrace it as a soul awakening journey where the old you will be done away with. If we fail to allow God’s written truth to sink deeper within then God will use other painful means to get our attention and understanding of what He seeks from us. He will use every method on this planet to bring us to a spiritual walk. You will be so secure in all areas of your life afterwards.

Your journey is beginning but you also need to find the reason behind what happened so that you can work on what needs to be worked on within you. The body is the temple of the Divine so it ought to be honored and cleansed so that your inner soul can live in peace within.

Ask God to send an awakened soul worker or light worker so that you can learn from that person. Your true twin will come when you have cleansed everything within. Just learn to detach yourself from situations and relationships. Love but don’t expect anything from anyone. Conform to a divine kind of love, freedom kind of love. Learn to be independent even in decision making.

I sympathize with you. I know the depth and passion of twin flame love. When it hits you, you just cannot function the same way again. The heavens will make sure that you only interact or befriend soul purpose people. No more control of your own life. It’s a challenging and a joyful journey.

Stay connected to the source. Years will seem like days. No rush because our souls live forever. God set eternity in our hearts. We forget about the flesh and look intently within. I lost a lot but am gaining internal and external blessings now.

Remember the words “Detach.” Heaven is our home, not people and earth. Contribute towards the goodness of the universe. Thanks for sharing your story and hoping you will be encouraged by this. All that is written here will make sense to you one day.