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2013 VMA: Red Carpet, Miley’s Twerks & Tongues!

Thought I’d stay away from all the hot mess that happened at the VMA’s this year, for no other reason than a tiny laziness to do a red carpet post yet again, and think well whether I should or should not take a stand on all of Miley’s bombshell persona coming out. The event per se will not even be up for discussion right now for the simple reason that I forgot to watch the awards this year (yeah I know, how ignorant of me. rolling my eyes right now), but I did browse the marvelous world wide web for red carpet infamous pics (kinda disappointing, I mean “dear celebs, y’all knew this was the VMA’s on MTV, not the Oscars or the likes, right?”), and my fashionista slash style-critique persona just couldn’t shut the hell up. So I had to do this post. If I hadn’t known any better I’d say hell has frozen because (as much as it pains me, and it does) I’m gonna say it… best dressed at 2013 VMA’s was none other than Taylor Swift. From the design, cut, color, simplicity of that old Hollywood dress, to the hair and makeup (kinda same old same old, but I’ll let that one slide, as I’m in a good mood today), Miss Swift was stunning. There I said it. Why ”all the love” for the young artist? The poor thing has never done anything to piss anyone off, tbh with you, but I. Just. Don’t. Like. Her. And I think we’re all allowed to have that one person (whom we may not even know personally) who we just can’t see eye to eye with. Aaaaaanyway… her bff Selena Gomez was all super stiff stylish in her Atelier Versace gown… I’m OK with the dress, though I thought it was a bit too much, too matronly, though it might as well be one of those gowns that does not photograph well from all angles, cause I’ve seen a few pics in which I actually loved it. Continuing our best dressed (read OK) list is Katy Perry and her grillz. Will not got there today. Someday though we’ll talk grillz. I don’t know if it’s just me, or what, but I just think all the girls were too Golden Globes/Oscars for the VMA. Too much, too red carpet’ish. FYI, every now and then, our dearest idols, you might want to pull that stick out of your asses and take yourselves less seriously. For instance Ciara, Rita Ora, or even Naya Rivera, while they all looked so hot and beautiful, I just thought it was too much for the occasion. Others like Miley Cyrus or Erin in her see-through-looks-like-sandwich-wrap-dress, were having just a bit too much fun. It was nice though to see Lady Gaga back, looking great and shocking us all with a normal black pretty nice dress. She did however went all the way in her sea-shells-costume 😉 later on. Good for you girl! And the rest were… bleah-borderline-OK. Oh… Ellie Goulding, now I thought she looked very MTV’ish VMA appropriate. (think posh/glam) and also Coco Rocha & Rihanna. Perhaps too simple, and everyday like looks, but the others should get a few notes from these gals: effortless, cool, sexy without even trying & fun. Just saying. I remember the oh-so-present-today-90s, when I wouldn’t miss a single VMA or EMA, glued to MTV. That was a true celebration & party for the stars. Funky fun fashion forward looks in the same room with those musicians who couldn’t care less if they showed up in they bare bums, pajamas, or jeans. Nobody gave a fuck, yet it was this je m’en fish‘ism that had us all emulating rockstars & popstars like mad fans. All of the sudden with the naughties settling in we’ve all become too politically correct, too stiff, boring and bored. Preoccupied more on what some websites or bloggers are saying about some event, dress, dance or Instagram pic, than about what they’re actually doing – celebs are giving us plain shallow eye-candy blog material for the Ka-ching! sound they get at the end of their day. And we the crowd… are so appalled by a 20 year old girl’s twerk. Seriously? We never had any problem when Oasis after winning their MTV awards would grab the mics to chat about A class drugs, getting wasted or banging some TV presenter. How come that never triggered the public’s dismay? So what, Miley was shaking all her horny bits to some dude I don’t even like, dancing and singing her thang up there, while the Smiths were in shock (lol) and all of a sudden the world was a different place. Really now? Isn’t that what happens at most clubs, isn’t twerking and shaking asses and boobs so common these days? I would’ve imagined Madonna’s shows cured us of that puritanical hypocrisy a while ago. Besides, (this may come as a news flash for some) Miley is not Hanna Montana, and she’s not 10 anymore, she’s 20. She does get laid, and in this process of discovering all her woman-whatever-persona, she’s doing her own thing. It’s all zoomed in due to her VIP status, that’s all. Today she’s doing the Teddy Bear meets horny bitch theme, tomorrow she may turn all grunge, or boho-chic. Oh… and just for the record, while I couldn’t care less about what Miley‘s doing, the dance didn’t bother me a bit (reading all the tweets I was expecting it to be SO out of place, but after watching it on Youtube, I was like ”oh… is this it? wtf is the problem then?”). Other than that tongue, that is. That thing had a mind of its own and would just not stay in the bloody mouth.