(29 January 1998, Ohio) Hungry or just
plain stupid? Wednesday was a fateful day for
Michael. He was shooting the breeze with a group of
buddies, watching a friend clean his fish tank, when the
friend complained that one specimen in particular had
become a fishy menace. It had outgrown the tank, and was
eating other denizens of the aquatic community.

Michael volunteered to assist. He seized the five-inch
fish and attempted to swallow it. Unfortunately, the fish
continued its predatory ways by sticking in his craw. As
he gasped futilely for breath, turned blue, and sank to
his knees, his three friends realized that something was
amiss. They phoned 911 and informed the dispatcher that
Michael had eaten some fish, and was having trouble
breathing.

Paramedics were quickly dispatched, and they arrived to
find the fish tail still protruding from the victim's
mouth. Despite their best efforts neither the fish nor
the twenty-three-year-old could be resuscitated. The
killer fish had claimed one last victim.

"If I dare you to jump off a bridge and you do it, you're
stupid," Police Major Mike Matulavich said. Apparently
Michael was not a victim, he was just another Darwin
Awards contender.