[The feed flicks on showing - dirt? Yes, dirt and rocks and a few sparse blades of grass. They move closer, and then farther away, and then closer again. Is the ground moving? No, the communicator is. A particularly observant person may notice that he's repeatedly smashing it against the ground.]

If you can hear me, tell me what the square root of the twelfth century is. The first person to answer this query obtains the ultimate prize.