Operatic Divas and Naked Irishmen: An Innkeeper’s Tale

Summary

In 1994, at the age of 64 with no business experience and very little start-up money, Nancy Hinchliff buys a turn-of-the-century mansion in Louisville, Kentucky and turns it into a charming Victorian Inn. Through sheer tenacity, she learns the business while successfully coping with one mishap after another. An admittedly asocial retired school teacher, she reinvents herself as an Inn keeper. The reader is drawn into this humorous and engaging tale as the author wields her way around cantankerous contractors, harrowing housekeepers, and no shortage of strange and interesting guests and events. Through her collected stories, Hinchliff gives readers a personal, in-depth, and honest look at what it’s like to be an inn keeper as she candidly describes her twenty-year journey of self discovery.

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Operatic Divas and Naked Irishmen - Nancy R. Hinchliff

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Chapter 1

THE BIG MOVE

The movers slammed the heavy doors together and walked around to the front of the van. I watched from my third-floor apartment window as they climbed up into the cab. Then I started toward the front door. It was June 1995, eight months before I would open my bed and breakfast. My furniture was in the moving van, and I was packed and ready to leave Chicago.

Glancing back into the apartment, I could hear the faint squeals of my three-year-old grandson, as though he were there. The sounds drifted down the hallway and past the empty bookcase where the stereo used to be. It still sat against one wall, too heavy and too large to take to Louisville. In the dim light, my imagination conjured up images of the two of us twirling and laughing, mesmerized by the music, as we danced to his favorite nursery rhyme. E-I-E-I-O echoed through the quiet of the morning.

I loved this place, and I hated leaving Chicago, and this apartment. Large windows covered two walls in the living room, letting in warm sunlight that brightened the hardwood floors. As I walked toward the front of the house again, the early-morning sun moved upward in the sky. It fell across my shoulders and made its way to the opposite wall, where my white sofa had sat only an hour before. In front of it, red, green, yellow, and black blocks of color were embedded in the Kilim carpet I’d purchased in Egypt. The room had been an eclectic mix of modern art and artifacts. Now—without furnishings, without modern art, without artifacts—it seemed so much smaller.

Walking into the sun room, I stopped at the windows to look outside again. The light bouncing off the panes flooded my eyes so I could barely make out the van. I moved into the shadows; yes, the van was still there, and the boys were drinking coffee from paper cups and smoking cigarettes.

I am not very social; two or three friends are enough for me. I guess you could call me a loner. I think that was why moving to a strange, new place was not off-putting to me. I’d traveled to Europe, Mexico, Central America, and Africa alone, and had been just fine with it. I actually like being by myself; I like challenging myself and being confronted with new situations. It makes me feel stronger.

I remember when I decided to go to Africa, my daughters were concerned.

But, Mom, my older daughter said, are you sure you want to go that far away from home all by yourself ?

I’ll be fine, Kylie, I said.It excites me just to think about it.

But what if something happens?

Like what? Something could happen right here in Chicago. I had organized and planned my vacation well—which, to me, was the best way to ensure a safe and happy trip. I don’t see a problem, I said.I can do what I want, when I want, and with whom I want. And I like traveling alone.

Kylie and I were not very close, so I was somewhat puzzled by her concern. Our relationship had been strained since she was a teenager. She didn’t let many people in and that included me, no matter how hard I tried.

So I wasn’t afraid of new experiences, or going it alone. But … what if I hated Kentucky? What if I never saw the few friends I had again? I’d lived in Chicago for over thirty years. It was my home. I loved the lake, the incredible restaurants, and all the culture the city had to offer. But I knew I couldn’t afford to live there on my teacher’s pension, with very little savings and nothing to fall back on. I’d thought about it over and over for the last year while teaching at the University. There was no way around it. I had to find a cheaper place to live.

At least I could make a little money as an innkeeper, despite that the thought of going into business made me really nervous. Not because I didn’t think I could do it—I thought I could do anything I set my mind to—but because being in business had never appealed to me. It sounded boring as hell. And I didn’t like focusing on money or numbers; I considered myself more of an artist type. I liked to create things: music, art, drama, gourmet food. I’d even taught dance for a while at one point. I’d always said, I will never go into business.

But a bed and breakfast was most definitely a business. And on top of that, there would be a constant train of people in and out of my home whenever they wanted. What was I thinking? I would have to talk to them. I hated chatting. The thought of talking about the weather made me shudder. I’d much rather discuss why Chopin’s etudes contained such broad, arpeggiated chords.

It was hard to believe I had lived in Chicago for thirty years. I’d done a lot in those thirty years—gotten divorced three times, earned degrees in education and music, taught high school, worked on a PhD, and traveled in and out of the country many times. I’d been thirty-four when I moved there, and now, at sixty-four, I was about to start a new career, one I knew absolutely nothing about.

I must be nuts, I thought, starting a new business at age sixty-four in a town where I only know one person. I stood there for a moment, staring at the empty room. My resolve returned. Yes, it would be an adjustment, but I’d gotten through my divorces and the death of my beloved grandmother, and once the grieving was over, I’d felt emotionally stronger.

I turned and walked through the French doors into what had originally been my dining room. It made a perfect, airy office with lots of space for a huge desk, file cabinet, and my computer. It was in that very room that I’d first started writing my dissertation.

My one-year sabbatical had begun in September of 1992— almost three years earlier. That fall, I’d registered at the University to work on an advanced degree. Since the Board of Education required a complete physical every few years, I made an appointment at my clinic to do it before classes started. A couple of days after my appointment, the clinic called saying they’d found something suspicious on my mammogram. They suggested a biopsy. I put it off until October, and finally went in as an outpatient on my birthday.

The results were not good: I was told I needed a lumpectomy and probably radiation and chemo. I had breast cancer.

I did not quit school and go into cancer treatment hibernation. I continued as planned. Every day for eight weeks, I went to the Michael Reese Cancer Center for radiation in the early morning, took classes at the university in the afternoon, and worked as a teaching assistant in the evenings. I spent most of my recuperation period alone. Although Kylie had taken me to the hospital for my biopsy and lumpectomy, she did not offer to help in any way afterward, nor did she call to see how I was doing. Thank God for Kristie, her sister, who called and e-mailed on a regular basis and let me know how concerned she was. She even offered to make the trip from Austin, Texas, where she lived, to Chicago to be with me a while. But, as usual, I preferred to handle the situation alone.

The radiation was scary to me, so I got through the fear and anger by drawing pictures of The Radiation Team from Hell. They sat hunched over on motorcycles, wearing helmets and goggles and looking fierce as they came toward me … dead on. I pasted the pictures on the wall over my desk and talked to them disparagingly every day—a trick I learned reading how psychotherapists treated people who were having panic attacks. Somehow, this defused their power over me.

Fortunately, my cancer was only stage one, and they got it all with a lumpectomy and removal of lymph nodes. I hadn’t needed chemo.

When the fall semester was over, I treated myself to a summer in Africa. It was very expensive, but I’ve never regretted it. It took me away from the angst of a year of studying, teaching, and cancer. And it helped with the depression that came once that year ended and my mental state plunged. I went on safari, gorilla trekking, and sightseeing from Kenya to Tanzania, Lake Kivu, Zaire, and Rwanda … an exhilarating and exciting trip.

Over that summer, my state of mind gradually stabilized; the trip had done the trick. When I returned to Chicago, I’d been ready for another year of teaching choral music and Chaucer to high school kids. I was so glad to get back to teaching; I missed it and the students.

I finished checking the apartment for things the movers might have left behind and looked out the window again. This time they were gone—on their way to Louisville, Kentucky. I hated to leave this place but decided I’d better get on the road. It was a five- or six-hour drive straight down I-65 to get there, and I wanted to arrive before dark.

I would be staying with Maggie until my furniture arrived from Chicago. We’d met when we were both teaching high school in Chicago. We were good friends. At least, I thought so.

As I pulled away from the curb, I started thinking about how Maggie and I had first met. We were both teaching at the same high school in Chicago. She was in the English department, I was in Music. One of the things that brought us together was our love of traveling. We went on many trips together over the years, from camping in Wisconsin to hostelling through Europe. Another bonding thing was the fact that we were both pretty opinionated, outspoken and eccentric. She was more so than I, but I was frequently sympathetic to her many causes.

Despite having these things in common, our personalities conflicted at times. But that didn’t stop us from being friends—although I must say that we each had our own idea of what a friend was. I saw her as a sister and thought of us as being close, or even, as some might say, best friends. But she had never had a sister so I don’t think she knew what that was all about, as I was reminded over and over through the years. I wanted more out of the relationship than she did in terms of declaration of feelings, loyalty, and caring. I always felt like something was missing. I guess you could say that I wanted to be closer to her and share personal feelings. But Maggie wasn’t much for spilling her guts to anyone, not even a close girlfriend.

The first inkling that this was the case was when I moved to Louisville. She was living two blocks from where I finally settled, in Old Louisville. In fact, she helped me find my house. She’d come with me to check out a historic mansion for sale near her.

As we stood beneath the chandelier in the parlor trying to figure out what in the world I would do with five bedrooms if I bought it, Maggie came up with the solution: turn it into a bed and breakfast. Oh, that’d be fun, I’d said, not having the slightest notion of what bed and breakfasts were all about, and never having thought of them as businesses requiring a specific skill set. To me, they were just fun places to spend the weekend.

Maggie’s solution had been a good option, and to my way of thinking, I could learn the business on the job. She certainly had been a big help to me in that situation, but in others, she was a total disaster. Our relationship constantly vacillated between hot and cold. And when it was cold, it was very cold.

Aside from giving me phone numbers for plumbers, maintenance people and so on, that’s about all she did for me … unless I asked. Weeks would go by that first year, while I was turning my house into a bed and breakfast, and I would not hear a word from her. She never called to see how I was doing, or ask me over for dinner or socializing, or dropped by, although I encouraged her to do so over and over.

In retrospect, I can remember many times back in Chicago that I was hurt by her inaction. She never gave me a birthday or Christmas gift, although she gave gifts to other people regularly. She did not call me very often, but when I called her and asked if she wanted to go out to dinner or to the theater, or to take a trip, most of the time she would say yes. So I was actually getting mixed signals.

One time, I invited a few friends, including Maggie, for dinner. The other girls arrived first and we all sat down to have a glass of my favorite French wine, Pouilly Fuisse. I had chilled it and it was delicious.

Where’s Maggie? Ellen asked. Is she coming?

Yeah, she’ll be here eventually. You know she’s always late.

We were all teachers working in the same high school and knew that Maggie had a problem with being on time. She’d gotten low ratings for tardiness from the principal many times. By the time we sat down to have our wine, she was already a half hour late. No phone call … nothing. That was par for the course.

How about another glass of wine, girls?

Sure, why not, they all answered in chorus.

As I brought the glasses out on a tray from the kitchen, the doorbell rang.

That must be her. I set the tray on the coffee table in front of the girls.

Go ahead, ladies. I’ll be right back. I rang the buzzer to my apartment to let her in and stepped out into the hallway. Leaning over the banister, I could hear the heavy door to the building slam shut.

That you, Maggie?

Yeah, it’s me. Be right there. No apology for being late.

Nothing. Again, par for the course.

Hey, how are you, I asked.

We hugged and walked inside the apartment.

Maggie called out a generic Hi girls from the door, walked into the bedroom, threw her coat across the bed, and wandered into the living room. There was no apology.

Home-made? Maggie scowled. You’re kidding. Won’t that take forever to make? Why didn’t you just buy it at a Chinese takeout? Maggie didn’t cook, so she would never make a home-cooked dinner for friends.

No, Maggie, it won’t take forever, I said."I do this all the time. Okay girls, go ahead and enjoy the wine. I’m going to start dinner. I’ll be right here in the kitchen. Maggie, come on and get a glass of this wonderful wine that Carol brought. It’s chilled.

Here’s a glass; the bottle’s in the fridge." Maggie filled her glass and walked back into the living room where the girls were laughing and talking.

Maggie hadn’t brought anything. She never did.

I was used to cooking with a wok and had already cut up green pepper, mushrooms and onions. I opened a can of water chestnuts and a can of pineapple chunks and pulled a package of almonds out of the cupboard. I had sliced the chicken into bite-sized pieces and had all the right herbs and spices out on the counter before I poured peanut oil into the wok and turned on the burner.

If you’ve ever made Chinese food in a wok, you’ll know that we used to sauté everything separately at a very high temperature, the vegetables, the meat, the almonds and pineapple, removing each different food group to a plate after it was sautéed. Then we’d scrape the bottom of the wok, leaving all the tasty bits. To that, we’d add rice wine, a thickener, a little water, bullion, and soy sauce. Then add everything we’d just sautéed and let it simmer. Nowadays, it’s a little different, not so work-intensive. Most of today’s Chinese dishes reflect the Asian Fusion movement. I was doing the old method.

I started the rice and popped the spring rolls in the warming oven. Although I hated to admit it, even to myself, I realized that making everything from scratch was not such a good idea. I had forgotten how long it took, and the smoke from the burning oil was starting to make my eyes smart. It felt like I’d been swimming all day in chlorinated water with my eyes wide open. As I continued sautéing each vegetable and each piece of chicken, a filmy coat of oil formed over my corneas and I could hardly see.

What’s going on in there? Maggie’s voice was high-pitched and bordering on loud. Are we gonna eat anytime soon or not?

I got a little irritated that she didn’t even bother to peek into the kitchen to see how I was doing. I could have been prostrate from all the heat and smoke. I was getting really tired from standing and sautéing. I honestly could have used some help, but not one of the girls came to my rescue. I made excuses for the other girls, who had never been to my house before. But Maggie was supposed to be my best friend.

Hey Maggie, how about coming and giving me a little help?You know I hate to cook, she yelled from the living room, then huffed her way into the kitchen, with the meanest look on her face. Nancy, why are you asking me to help? I came over to relax. You shouldn’t even be making a Chinese dinner from scratch; it takes way too long; I would have gotten take-out, she said.

We got into an argument over how long it was taking and she left the kitchen. I continued to get the dinner together, set the table, and served it within a half hour. The food was delicious and everybody loved it. After dinner, Carol, Ellen, and Lois helped me clean up, then left. When Maggie left, it was in a huff. I reacted by not calling her and she did the same. We didn’t speak for a couple of years. Then one day, I got a note from her saying she wanted to be friends again. At first I balked, but then I acquiesced and our weird friendship started up again.