Don’t you hate it when you contract someone to paint your $350-million mega yacht and they do a drippy, sloppy job? That’s what allegedly happened to Russian multibillionaire Andrey Melnickenko, and he isn’t taking it lying down: he’s suing Akzo Nobel, the owner of Dutch paint company Dulux, for $100-million.

The lawsuit covers not just punitive damages and the cost to repaint the vessel, but also the cost for Melnickenko to rent another yacht for the supposed 18 months it will take to redo his own super yacht.

Created by French designer Philippe Starck and built by The Blohm & Voss shipyard in Hamburg for US$357-million, the 118-meter-long vessel is also known as Super Yacht “A” after Aleksandra, Melnickenko’s wife.

The issues with the paint job allegedly includes “paint appearing to run,” “lines and sags,” as well as “an overall ‘cloudy’ appearance,” according to the Daily Telegraph.

The company already repainted the ship a second time after the plutocrat’s dissatisfaction — at its own expense — but Melnickenko was still unhappy, according to the Daily Mail.

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The yacht is opulent inside and out. “Designed by French interiors guru Philippe Starck, it boasts a dance floor with a glass ceiling — which also forms the bottom of a swimming pool on the deck above,” the Daily Mail writes. “The master bedroom is only accessible via a fingerprint recognition system and is protected with bomb-proof glass.”

The Wall Street Journal notes that on the outside, the ship looks more like a “military” vessel or a “submarine” than a traditional mega-yacht, which is a subject of “hot debate” in yachting circles.

The “A” costs almost $20-million a year to run, and, according to the Mail, it costs almost $600K every time it’s refueled. Melnickenko is known for his extravagance; in 2007, he paid Jennifer Lopez $2-million to perform at his birthday party.

Perhaps in the meantime Melnickenko could consider the Serene, the mega-yacht which anchored off B.C.’s Hornby Island last summer. While the Serene isn’t quite as classy as the “A,” it makes up for its garishness by being longer (it’s the biggest privately owned yacht in the world) and having a submarine.

“With a beam (or width) of 61 feet, she very comfortably sleeps 24 guests and 52 crew. A ship such as Serene will cost hundreds of millions of dollars, if you have to ask. In her case, one third of a billion dollars.”