Skydiving too sedate? Bungee jumping a bore? We’ve got the ultimate rush for today’s jaded thrill-seeker! Here’s how it works: A genuine medieval catapult (a) launches you across the Grand Canyon (b), onto a waiting trampoline (c), which propels you through a wall of flame (d) into a wading pool full of Nerf balls (e).

… oh, and there’s a certain spot on the trampoline you’ll need to avoid, too.

If someone would please remove these roller skates from my feet, I’ll get up and walk away gracefully.

I am much, much prettier than you.

What do you call this magical land where rubber duckies inexplicably fall from trees?

Sender-inner Emily B. writes: I’m working at a whitetail deer ranch this summer, and we’re bottle-raising all the doe fawns. So far we have 46 fawns on the bottle. They’re all incredibly cute, pushy, and they’re all named: The pictures of the fawn in the grass are of His Majesty, who we’ve been nursing back to health. He’s a spoiled brat, but he’s so small and fuzzy that he gets away with a lot; the staring one is Eowyn (she’s a little crazy); the two curled up next to each other are Diana and Wren; and finally, the brand spanking new baby is Clementine being licked clean by her mama, Trey.

Whoa lady, if you’re about to do what I think you’re about to do, then I can tell you with complete certainty that things will never be the same. You’re about to ruin everything, and I’m sorry, but I absolutely cannot allow you to put that wooden cutting board through the dishwasher.

A baby reticulated giraffe was born just days ago to mom Teesa and dad Sterling. The calf will stay with mom in an area away from guest view so the baby can be closely monitored to ensure that the newborn is nursing and growing properly. After a few months, the duo will join the other animals on the Serengeti Plain, where they will surely experience a lot of rubbernecking.