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Chocolate bark is the impressive dessert that pastry luddites like me can pull off. I get so flustered when I try to bake things and I don't have the time to experiment with it (because I'm busy making stuff like this, duh).

To fill a quarter sheet baking pan, you need two bags of any chip chocolate. Before you get started, prepare the pan with a quick swipe of a paper towel soaked in vegetable oil and then a layer of plastic wrap with extra hanging over the edges.

If the bark will be one color, melt it all in a double boiler. If you're going for two tone like the one pictured above, melt the white chocolate first. Pour it into the pan and use a spatula to spread it flat. Make sure to tap the pan against the counter to make sure and get rid of any air bubbles. Place it in the fridge to set while you melt the second batch of chocolate.

Chop up your toppings. I used a mix of dried fruit and pink Himalayan salt. Pour your second batch of melted chocolate into your now cold pan and spread it flat quickly. While the chocolate is still hot, sprinkle the chopped toppings over it and place the bigger pieces like candied lemon firmly, making sure they don't stick up.

Refrigerate for an hour or until the whole pan is firm and not warm anymore.

This photo is a lie. We initially thought you could bash it with a meat tenderizer to make jaunty shapes but it was far too thick. We were better off cutting funky angles with a chef knife.

And look! Fancy looking dessert! Cut them as big or as small as you need to. Store in an airtight container in the fridge.

What will you put on your bark? I wanna see! Tag @Randwiches on Instagram.