Jordana:

Texts from the Attic

29 September, 2027

3:46AM — JordanaI was in the old attic today. It still hasn’t been recarpeted and it was hard to avoid the splinters as I crested the stairs. Reminding me of the feeling of opening an app

On the far end of the attic I could see the small box resting on the windowsill. It was backlit but I could tell by its size and presence.. the hint of its Kraft board surface… that it was my first lapka

A path had been cleared from the stairs to the window, with less distinguishable boxes stacked on either side. Who knows what was inside them? It’s hard to imagine ever having things to “keep”, let alone unboxing and revisiting their significance

Can you forget an emotion?

Guess what? Dust still exists. Still don’t know what that stuff is

3:58AM — JordanaIt took me a while to own a lapka. I guess you know that. But I’ll always remember my first encounter with one. Lapka Organic, at the grocery store. I hadn’t slept well the night before. In fact, I remember the dream I had pretty vividly

I used to dream of media, of loading pages and stuff. Spinning wheels became tumbleweeds became snowflakes and suddenly we were stuck in a snowglobe. I’d also remember my dreams later on through media. Like I’d see a video ad, or certain interface, and recall a dream I had weeks ago. It’s kind of like storing your friend’s data on your computer and in turn, storing your data on your friend’s computer. So you’d never lose it. The data, that is. I did that once but I don’t really speak to that friend anymore. I wonder if she’s still storing my data. Or did she delete it? Or did she involuntarily lose everything when/if her computer stopped working? But whatever

4:17AM — JordanaI’m sorry I hacked your twitter account.

Did you ever even care?

I wasn’t the ideal consumer but you learned to idealize my consumption

4:20AM — JordanaThat was cool

4:23AM — JordanaI remember an encounter with a stranger at a cafe who asked to use my phone charger. He was referring to my lapka, which I had plugged into my iphone. I didn’t correct him and just handed him the lapka, letting him figure it out for himself. I think I tweeted about that too

4:26AM — JordanaYou and I were both that stranger, in different ways, throughout our relationship. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe at least one of us knew what we were doing

4:28AM — JordanaI can’t remember why I stopped tweeting. To be fair no one was using twitter anymore

4:33AM — JordanaIt seemed like things were moving so fast for a while, without results. It was like I remember with the phones… I was getting a new one every year or so, for no particular reason

It was the only plan. Nothing ever changed

4:40AM — JordanaBut the early 20’s were different… they were roaring, just like last century’s. It turns out Kanye knew what was best for us. Maybe he didn’t and it happened to be the best, or best yet

Better

Around the time of the election things started slowing down in a nice way

Government, technology, money, family

They all receded and the fog cleared, there was nothing left to juggle, or fumble for that matter

Death. You could mistake it for some archaic technology you might read about in a textbook, maybe after the chapter on the pencil

Technology was so good it knew when to disappear. And death, almost magically, went along with it hand in hand. Endless scroll has to end somewhere but we were no longer scrolling

4:47AM — JordanaI carry only one thing with me, the same thing for the past seven years. I feel the cold and polished surface between my fingers, deep in my pant pocket reserved for this object, where loose change used to go, or my phone, or my keys

There’s less to forget, more to remember

4:48AM — JordanaYou know what I’m talking about

5:05AM — JordanaI made my way to the other end of the attic. I picked the box up from the windowsill, ceremoniously wiped that dust away and slid it open

But there was nothing inside. Just an empty space where the four devices should have been

I racked my brain but couldn’t remember where I might have left them

5:10AM — JordanaI looked around at the stacks of sealed boxes and wondered if the devices were stashed away in one of them

Each box was marked with a color that I don’t remember deciding on. It reminded me of Lapka’s measurements: Green was good, yellow was borderline, red was bad

But I’ll never remember whether that one carrot tested good or bad. All I remember is using it as the snowman’s nose during the first winter I spent in this house. Nor do I remember how the EMF’s tested for my microwave the last days of Summer 2014. I just remember waiting for the leftovers to reheat with my boyfriend during the perfect September evening. I don’t remember the radiation levels on the plane as I left Los Angeles a year later. I only remember the single tear I shed as the city lights faded from view. I was clutching my Lapka Radiation so tightly that the reading was probably inaccurate anyways. I never knew how they worked

5:14AM — JordanaStanding there in the attic, it would’ve been a good moment for Lapka Humidity. It was always so humid up there, but I now felt comfortable, even peaceful. Maybe Lapka would tell me otherwise. Maybe it’s actually too dry. Maybe it was never humid after all. I closed the box and returned it to the windowsill

I won’t need a device to know that everything is going to be okay

5:14AM — JordanaIt’s okay to get lost sometimes, even Lapka

I have everything I need in my pocket. Everything is going to be okay.