Spider Jokes

I was having a conversation about odd foods this week – have a look here if you are interested – which became a debate about spiders, and hence, the topic of this week’s one-liners and puns is spider jokes. Well, what did you expect to find on the web? Of course, these have no guarantee of funniness or originality…

Was going to buy an exotic spider from the pet shop, then I realised I could get one cheaper on the web.

Got a pair of spider silk trousers. They look great, but the flies keep getting stuck.

Saw a spider on my computer keyboard earlier, but not to worry. It’s under Ctrl.

I’m not a big fan of spider plants. One of the hardest snooker shots.

I asked a friend what spiders eat. He didn’t know, told me to go and check on the web.

A friend has a bizarre fear of spiders in raincoats. Anorakaphobia.

A couple of friends have opened their doors recently a been slapped by a large, obnoxious spider. There’s a nasty bug going around.

I know a spider who works in IT. He’s a web designer.

Went to the chemist and asked what was good for nasty bites. Chap said, “an irate spider”.