Saturday, June 11, 2011

I will have retrib ution for my humiliation at the hands of the Ludwig imposter! As fate would have it the Master has taken it upon himself to study the many Ludwig. It would seem the information as to how their are so many of them evades even him! A Service team of approximately seventeen, including myself, are going to proivde our assistance to the Master and take up arms against the strange men in his stead when the Master has more important matters to tend to. I have several theories as to why exactly there was more than one young Ludwig Smith, though my cohorts think they're all ridiculous and shot them down as fast as possible without even considering them. You would never hurt me like that would you? No of course not.

So you'd like to know what happened? Well I should have time to explained. being reduced to simple garden work by my superiors at the proxies that joined the Master to keep their family lives. Which is extremely difficult with a single arm. Karma I guess, mocking Will for losing the arm he didn't need to draw or whatever he did, and me losing my writing arm. Luckily I can type with this one. Then again Will didn't REALLY lose his arm. Maybe I still have mind and this is all an elaborate dream? What was that? Probably not? I hear you.

It started when I told Galahad, a fairly green proxy and as I would later find completely and totally useless in a fight, who I was. I explained everything about myself, that I normally feel comfortable explaining. Dammit, I see a typo but I don't want to backspace. My arm is so damn tired already, and this is a fairly short post. Anyway back on point, I explained every single factor of Master's forces. I made sure to drill it into his head that if you're a fucking idiot, or disobidient, that you will end up punished. You could end up punished for doing nothing at all. Like. My.Self. Then again this was more of what he did than what I did. I only took his punishment for him. And dammit do I regret that decision. Is it possible for Master to reattach limbs? I'm frightened to ask that it would only end with me missing more useful body parts. I don't think I'd ever have children, no I'm sure I won't, but I want the possibility.

Proxies have had targets retaliate before. Done some back and forth, tried to get the job done, failed sometimes. But always wearing said target down each time, always getting something done. This was not the case at this time. This was complete and utter defeat. The Master sent other Proxies out to deal with Ludwig Smith, one of them was someone I rather liked who is no longer with us. Getting to the point, the Proxies that were sent after Ludwig Smith eventually met up with Galahad and I in Massachusetts. As expected we knew exactly where to look. He'd been marked after all. Galahad, Myself, and about fourteen other proxies arrived at what looked like a large rundown mansion. Now I have serious doubts about the saying size matters, because the outside of the building was vomit inducing.

When walking in you could hear the living rats and smell their kin's corpse. It was kind of nice inside though. While yes, I wouldn't call it a mansion due to the fact no sane rich person would be caught dead in this wreck. I was eager to fight though. Ludwig was famous for his works to fend off the Master. Unfortunately he was a fighter meaning he was generally insane. He's dead now though so it doesn't matter. Now getting back to the point of the post. Complete and utter defeat. No questions asked. We split up. I went upstairs with Galahad and a proxy called Tumbleweed while the other thirteen or so proxies checked different areas. The bedrooms were indescribable Let's see. The bed sheets were absolutely filthy, the wallpaper had spots in it, and in more than one room the roof was damaged. That's when we saw him. A young Ludwig Smith. It took me a while to recognize him, I'd only seen the man's photograph from a time when he was aging. No that was a physically young(despite the gray hair, don't ask me.) Ludwig Smith. I had been daydreaming with the aid of a window, looking out at parked trucks while the others tore apart the bedroom. It's when I heard Galahad call my name along with Tumbleweed's. You know what I just noticed. Galahad and I were the only one's not assigned to this mission. I'm getting away from the point now...

So where was I? Oh yes! Ludwig Smith standing in front of the door glaring at us like we'd gutted his entirely family and forced him to watch. Y'know like in generic movies? I believe glares like that are commonly associated with Thurman's Roaring Rampage of Revenge. ANYWAY. That's when we noticed the yells and grunts coming from downstairs. Don't ask why we can hear downstairs, because it's just going to get me nitpicking on the house again. Wait. Okay I'm going to save this now. Cut off June 2nd.

Greetings. I will be hosting this blog from now on. I'm Tumbleweed. I don't really like to talk about myself very much, but I guess my most defining trait would be illusion. I'm a performer. The above was a sample of my work, given from what I assumed was Nil's perspective. I think I have his personality half way down. What did you think? Did I sale?

Oh did you expect Nil to continue the run down about where he's been. I've noticed that he's just handing out information about The Service like nobodies business. There really is. No better term. Than, What the fuck? Excuse my language. But I guess it'd be pretty messed up if I just left you dangling by a thread. But were you generally even interested? No? I didn't think so. But while I was pretending to be Nil I made a purpose to drag things out like he usually does. Basically what happened is that the person who was pretending to be Richer Rock made a post in red on Nil's blog taunting one of his friends. Nil didn't know who this was. And assumed it was Redlight or the Fakelight, neither one of these was the case. It was the Ludwig fake. According to Nil he'd been troubled by the peculiar post for a very long time, saying as time went on he began to feel like he was being watched by a hostile force.

What does this have to do with the false Ludwig? Well. As we charged toward the exit screaming for our lives and doing what little we can to fend off the phony we were stopped by MORE young looking Ludwig. I remember thinking at one point that we were in a house of mirrors, but no. They were all physically identical and solid. They were also, for lack of a better term, curbstomping us to tears. The Master's Service is never one to be taken lightly, I am confused as to how this can be. My "peers" were being stabbed, ripped into, beaten with brass knuckles, by an opposing force we thought we were prepared for. Nil(who never lost an arm, and is probably neglecting to post due to his hurt pride...and my changing the password.) Galahad(who Nil really did take a reassigning for.) and two other proxies who you probably aren't familiar with escaped the house alive, the two other proxies, who's birth names were Jonah and Russel, were shot in the head. I was surprised I actually got to the truck I arrived in alive. After this ordeal I began to contemplate why this might be, just sitting in an empty room waiting for the inevitable reassignment thinking to myself, ''Why are you alive Tumbleweed? Why are you still here?"

And that's when I figured it out. I'm special. I'm better than Nil and the other generic proxies. They don't deserve to Blog. So when Nil decided to put off coming back to blogger and explaining what happened I did what I do naturally. I performed. I changed his password to both his email address and his Blogger. And now I will continue to update this blog. I'm a much more fitting host aren't I? Yes! You agree! While I may not have done it in such detail I DID explain what happened, and if you'd like more details well then I'm not afraid to deliver. So without further delay. . . Welcome to Tumbleweed's Wonderful Masquerade!