HWA Adrenaline Recap (3/10)

After nearly a month of repeat episodes from 2006, HWA finally got back on track last week and aired a brand new show. Instead of starting with the usual "blood will be spilled, bones will be broken" music though we're greated by Tim Tatum and Paul Preston. The announce team of Hooks and Chris are snowed in as is the venue itself, as there is no crowd. Killer - let's bring out The Funker and The King and have a 2007 update to the legendary empty arena match. No? Paul Preston says instead we're going to have interviews from their last big show "My Bloody Valentine" and take a look at the card for Cyberclash 2.0. Nice idea in theory but if HwA had 2.0 at 8 PM EST/7 Central on March 10th then the PPV was already over before this episode of Adrenaline aired in most markets. Timing is everything people! At least if HWA stays current we should have any fallout and/or title changes on next week's episode.

The Adrenaline theme music finally plays and we go to Tatum and Preston sitting at a table with Andre Heart. "The 5 Most Wanted, look man, my thoughts are that these guys have been a thorn in the GP Code for 4-5 months now, you stay jumpin' us from behind. You wanna take this to the streets? Cause we can! We can take this right down to downtown Cincinatti where GP Code is from and do this Gangsta Pimp style." Preston asks what happened when Cody Hawk tattooed Heart's partner Deja Vu with a steel chair. "Maaan, tattooin is an over, is an understatement man. That's a straight up understatement. What he did to my partner was absolutely ridiculous. What are we gon' do to somebody that said they were our friend, and turned their back on the GP Code? We gon' take care of them, that's a promise." Tatum wants to know about his match at MBV with Super Zeta. "I may be a pimp, I may be a gangsta, but I will never be a dummy. I will never overlook a man in my life. So Zeta, tonight, My Bloody Valentine me and you one on one it's going down." Zeta interrupts wearing his mask and jumpsuit and starts yelling at Heart before security comes out to break it up. A promo for the HWA World War III DVD airs and we go to commercial.

We're back with Quinten Lee and Ala Hussein, the tag team Foreign Intelligence. Lee: "Nothing's really going on with Foreign Intelligence. What we're doing right now is pursuing individual careers because we've done everything in the tag division. We're multiple time tag champions, we've beat 'em all. What else could we do? So this is a friendly split, nothing permanent, if there's an opportunity later we'll take it but right now we're going to pursue other goals." Preston asks about them firing manager Preston Black, which provokes an irate reaction from Hussein who starts cutting a promo worthy of Shawn Daivari before Lee tells him to "speak in American." Hussein: "He just ticks me off, he's been a thorn in our side for so long, he cost us titles matches everything, we were at the top now I feel like a nobody. I need to get to the top again whether it's singles, tag teams, whatever." Lee: "Patrick Black you told me that you were going to make our lives a living hell, excuse me Foreign Intelligence made ourselves, we brought you in as a consultant and did you watch our backs, NO, so we jettisoned you from the team. At some point one of us is gonna get our hands on you and you'll be out of our lives permanently." Hussein is asked about his match with Ed Gonzales. Hussein: "You couldn't beat me fair and square without Patrick Black, so tonight I'm going to take care of you and Black I dare you to come and try something." Commercial.

We're back with Tim Tatum plugging My Bloody Valentine again, with a screen informing us it will be January 17th at 8 PM Eastern. At least they're promoting a show that took place in 2007 even if it was two months ago. By now they're probably selling DVD's of it along with the World War III show from December 30th they plug every commercial break. TV champion Ganger teams up with Neveah for a mixed tag match against Brian Beech and our next guest Heather Owens. Tatum asks about her past with Neveah: "I wish I could explain what happened between us. I had her back, she had mine, we were very friendly, and I really don't know what happened. I don't know if Irish Airborne and Brock Guffman got in her head, but she just doesn't seem like the same Neveah I knew a year ago." Preston says she's been injured in the feud with Neveah. "She's broke my tooth, she's bruised my jaw and my entire body, but it enrages you. I have a high pain tolerance but this is really aggravating me. She can get her little hits in but she will get hers I promise that." Preston asks about what it's like stepping between the ropes. "I think there are no women in the division, so I'm here to..." and she's interrupted by Kimera a.k.a. the Motown Mawler who says nobody cares what she has to say and throws her out of the interview booth. "Anything violent that happens in this company you better believe I'm at the center of it. I didn't get in this for the money I got in this for the bloodspot. I will give credit where it's due Brian Beech got the best of me and he's one hell of an athlete, Beech has taken me to the limit. However I won the match at World War III, and he may be taking time away from our tet-a-tet to heal up and deal with family isses, but as far as I'm concerned on the scoreboard it's tied." Tatum asks what's next for Kimera. "What's in the future for me is nothing but the absolute best. I've wallowed in mediocrity and wrestled those who shouldn't be able to lace my boots. I want nothing but this company from the best. Nothing can stop me, nothing can contain me. If you have the heavyweight belt, if you're 5 Most Wanted, if you're Jon Moxley or Chris Carnage I don't care. Bring your best but I'm coming for you." Commercial.

We're back with Preston and Tatum in the empty arena again, saying that they're "on the road to Cyberclash 2.0" which Tatum plugs as a huge day of events on March 10th starting with a fantasy camp to train with HWA stars, followed by a special matinee card, an up-close Q&A session with the wrestlers, and finally a main show headlined by Irish Airborne defending against The Mavericks in a ladder match. Preston reminds us that you should visit HWAOnline.com for more info and then we get wrestling footage as a "Cyberclash Flashback" including a feud between Matt Stryker and Tack. The flashback fades away and it looks like we'll get to see an actual match during this show.

* Matt Stryker {C} v. Tack (HWA Television Title)

Even if it's out of date, any match at this point is better than one straight hour of interviews. Stryker hits the ring wearing his belt and Superman-style trunks, and Tack's already there waiting for him. The ref takes the title and holds it up, then gives instructions to both men and reminds them it's one fall only. This was the opening match of the first Cyberclash according to Chris and Hooks. The two lock up and break apart, lock up again and Tack pushes Stryker into the corner before the ref breaks a hold at four. Back to the center of the ring and the two trade wristlocks before Stryker gets a headlock and Tack tries to push the chin away to get free. Tack finally counters by grabbing the wrist but Stryker reverses it and takes him to the mat, cinching the headlock even tighter. Tack tries to kick off with his legs, finally gets to his feet and throws Stryker off the ropes who comes back with a tackle, Tack responds with an arm drag and another wristlock and works on twisting Stryker's left arm off. Stryker fights out and hits another shoulder tackle and a boot to the face before going back to the side headlock again. Okay normally I like Stryker but this shit is boring, stop with the damn headlock. Tack mercifully lands a knee to Stryker's head and breaks it up, and the HWA crowd has split chants for Stryker and Tack. Tack goes back to working the arm again and goes to the matt for a cross armbreaker but Stryker rolls him over for a two count. Tack gets Stryker back down in a hammerlock and keeps applying pressure to the arm, and the ref checks to see if he wants to tap out. Tack lands knees to the head to weaken him and then rolls the shoulders back for a couple of two counts. Stryker fights out and staggers to his feet, chops Tack in the back and rams his head into the turnbuckle before another knife edge chop. Tack ends up on the apron and goes top rope but Stryker charges in for a superplex and nails it to get a two count. Stryker puts Tack in the corner and does a Samoa Joe style facewash, then pulls him back to the center for a two count. Stryker goes top rope but this time Tack cuts him off and hits a superplex of his own. Okay I know the gimmick is these guys used to be tag parners but the parity in this match is getting ridiculous. If they're just going to keep countering everything the other does tit for tat I might as well skip ahead to the end to who ges the last tat in. Okay here's the finish - Tack goes to the top again, tries to come off with a high crossbody but Stryker catches him with a knee to the gut, comes off the ropes with a mafia kick, and pins Tack for three. WINNER AND STILL TV CHAMP: MATT STRYKER. And now a word from our sponsors.

Tatum welcomes us back to the empty arena for an with Jon Moxley, who he puts over as having been busy in Puerto Rico and having tryouts with WWE. Preston wants to know from Moxley what happened to during his open challenge with Brian Jennings where Moxley lost the HWA heavyweight title. "I don't expect most people to understand what I did. I need a challenge, and I couldn't wait to start climbing the mountain again, and then came War Games, and I got to the top of the mountain quickly - a little too quickly. I said well that was easy, here I am champion again, what kind of accomplishment is this. You hear about the hallowed history, but I wondered is this title still relevant? That is the question I was asking when I begged for somebody to come out and fight me, somebody make me rise to the occasion and give me a challenge. If Brian Jennings has anything he has guts, he drew a line in the dirt and fought me toe to toe and made me tap out. That fires me up more than anything. Now I know there's at least one guy who can give me a challenge and fight me on an even keel. I'm not going to beg for a rematch, I'm back on the horse, I'm picking up win after win and I will be #1 contender again."

Jennings comes behind the interview position with a beer in one hand and the title in the other hand. He picks up a whole case of Miller Lite and sets it on the desk. "Moxley how ya doin', what's up buddy? The champ is in the building. I never get tired of saying that. Funny story I just came from Les Thatcher's house, he just told me get the hell out, I have no idea what that means but get me a chair, hello Jon Moxley would you like a brew?" Moxley: "You think you're funny. I gave you all the credit in the world, you are the champion no matter what anybody says and you deserve it, the feel good moment of the year but soon you'll come crashing back hard to reality and the reality is that I'm out of your league." Jennings: "Moxley Moxley, the buffalo wing, tap tap tap, was that out of your league? Alright have a nice day, drive fast take chances." Buffalo takes his place at the table and asks if he's talking to "Paul Peck and Tim Horton." Jennings does the drunk gimmick but Tatum finally gets him back on track. "Me and Matt Stryker versus the 5 Most Wanted. Would you like a beer you look nervous. Let me ask you something what is this Frantic 5, Fabulous 5, 5 Touchers, whatever it's like a breakfast deal orsomething. You got Cody Hawk in fancy blue shorts and this Samoan superhero guy and this horse jockey Kentucky derby guy and the reality show star 'The Bachelor' Rafferty and then this hermaphrodite, he she had surgery last week it went well Paul Peck so I'll get you the number it's all good." Tatum says he still hasn't answered the question. "Do me a favor you look stupid." Jennings opens and hands him a beer. "Let me tell you on a serious note me and Hawk used to be tight, one of the first guys to congratulate me was Stryker when I won but where was Cody? He was out doing NyQuil, something about the fourth meal, on the streets of Cincinatti." Tatum: "This is a serious situation." Jennings: "I've got Stryker he's an icon too, I'm from Buffalo, I'm from the East, I know you were there in the 90's Paul Peck look at you, I know Stryker can throw down, this is a serious situation son. Tonight's the night 5 Most Wanted you can have any combination you want, it's me and Stryker I'm getting a text message hold on. It's Dr. Bones, there's a party in the basement! There's kegs, loose broads and grandma made a buffet. I gotta go! I'm gonna leave this for ya." Jennings pulls the beer in front of Tatum and we go to commercial.

We're back with Tatum welcoming back BJ Whitmer "It's great to be back with HWA, it's where I cut my teeth in this business, where I grew up in this business." Tatum wants to know what made him agree to help Matt Stryker. "Last fall as I was home rehabbing this ankle I had the chance to catch some HWA TV. I saw the 5 Most Wanted jump Matt Stryker. Matt gave me a call, and he's an old friend of mine, he asked for my help and I gave it." Tatum wants to know how he feels about Cody Hawk. "You turned your back on Stryker and you turned your back on me. You made a mistake." Sean Casey interrupts and comes out to get in Whitmer's face, Whitmer starts to take off his jacket to brawl with him but gets jumped by the rest of 5MW and that's how this week's show ends, with Casey cutting a promo and 5MW leaving him for dead. See ya next week for the Adrenaline Recap. PODER~!