The Advanced Guide To Using Facebook To Get Your Girlfriend Back

It is highly unlikely that you are going to be able to get your ex girlfriend back by just using Facebook. Generally speaking it is going to take a lot more than that to achieve your goal. However, that doesn’t mean that you can’t maximize your own personal Facebook profile to propel your efforts into winning her back even further.

A lot of men out there don’t really have any idea what the correct protocol is for Facebook when it comes to getting an ex girlfriend back. Well, this advanced guide is going to answer every possible question you could have about using Facebook to get your ex girlfriend back.

I am going to be talking about things like,

Whether or not you should remain friends with your ex girlfriend.

When you should change your relationship status.

What you should do with any pictures of you and your ex girlfriend together.

How to act if your ex does something on your profile.

What your profile should look like.

How to incite a little jealousy.

And much more!

First though, I need to hammer something home for you before we begin.

Facebook Is One Small Piece To A Big Puzzle

What was the very first thing I said when I started this guide?

I told you that Facebook alone isn’t going to win you your ex girlfriend back.

Lets pretend that the process of getting a girlfriend back is equivalent to putting a puzzle together. Well, using this analogy Facebook would be looked at as one small piece to a much larger puzzle. In other words, if you are expecting this guide to show you step by step how to construct the overall puzzle then you are going to be disappointed because this guide is going to be focusing specifically on just the one puzzle piece, Facebook.

If you are looking for something more comprehensive then I suggest you take a look at my book,

Do You Even Have a Chance of Getting Your Ex Back? Find out in 2 Minutes...

What Would You Do With a Proven SystemThat Allowed You to Attract Any Woman You Wanted (Including Your Ex)

However, if you really want to know the strict guidelines you should follow when it comes to Facebook after a breakup in order to win your girlfriend back then you came to the right place.

Staying Friends Vs. Unfriending

One of the biggest questions I get on Ex Girlfriend Recovery is whether or not men should unfriend their girlfriends after a breakup. You see, a lot of men are of the mindset that they have to punish their exes by cutting them out of their life completely which means unfriending them on Facebook.

I take the opposite view…

Facebook presents us with a unique opportunity to let your ex girlfriends see how great your life is without them which in turn can spark thoughts like,

“Maybe I made a mistake by letting him go.”

Statistics have shown us that 88% of people are spying on their exes social profiles online after a breakup (according to the Toronto Star.) So, why not take advantage of this, since we know your ex girlfriend is probably going to spy on you via Facebook and put your best foot forward to present yourself in a light that will make your ex girlfriend want you back.

In other words, YOU WANT TO STAY FRIENDS WITH YOUR EX GIRLFRIEND.

Ah, but this leads us to an interesting predicament. What about those men who have already unfriended their exes and are reading this for the first time?

What To Do If You Unfriended Your Ex Girlfriend On Facebook

I guess the question you are wondering is if you should try to friend your ex girlfriend back?

Absolutely!

But only after you have “pimped out” your profile like I will suggest later on in this guide. Look, I know it may be looked at as a bit of a weak sign but in the grand scheme of things no one is going to remember who friended who first.

For now, swallow your pride and take the longer approach to this.

Lets flip the script back to those men who are still friends with their exes and talk a little bit about the relationship status protocol.

When Should You Change Your Relationship Status?

When it comes to changing your relationship status from, “in a relationship” to “single” there has always been some debate on the timing of when you should do it.

You see, one camp believes that it is better to wait out your ex girlfriend and do it after she does it.

What are the advantages of this?

Well, the longer she keeps her status as “in a relationship” the higher the chances are of you being able to patch things up with her in that time frame since her keeping that status is indicative that she is on the fence about a full break up. Of course, I have been dealing with broken relationships for years and I can tell you that the truth is that it is highly unlikely that you are going to be able to patch things up with her that quickly.

Instead, what I would recommend for you to do is to change your status from “in a relationship” to “single” as soon as the breakup occurs.

Why?

When that moment finally comes for her spy on your profile post breakup she is going to feel some sting when she sees that status change.

Now, I am not one for making people suffer but sometimes letting her feel that sting is good because it forces her to realize how much you really meant to her.

The greater the sting the greater the love.

Oh, one last thing before we move on. If you do end up being the first one to change your relationship status I am sure you are going to get people posting on your feed asking questions like,

“What happened????”

If this does end up happening to you make sure you do not respond to any of them. I mean, if you were to do that and say something mean or hurtful it could harm your chances when you end up trying to win your ex girlfriend back.

What Do You Do About “Couple Pictures” With The Two Of You Together?

Ah, the couple picture!

Generally speaking if you end up dating someone and it is getting serious the two of you are going to end up taking pictures together. Now, what happens when a couple ends up taking pictures together?

Well, each couple probably posts them on Facebook.

What I would like to talk about now is what you should do with the pictures that you and your ex took together that are posted on your profile.

Do you get rid of them all?

or

Do you keep them all?

I suggest a hybrid of the two!

For example, lets say that on your Facebook profile you have a total of 20 pictures of you and your ex girlfriend together. Well, I would pick out two random pictures and delete the other 18.

We have already established that it is pretty much inevitable that your ex girlfriend is going to come snooping around your profile eventually so she is definitely going to notice that most of the pictures of the two of you are gone but then she is also going to notice that you kept two.

She is going to see that and probably wonder to herself,

“Why would he delete all of our pictures except these two?”

I can’t tell you how many women have messaged me on my other website, Ex Boyfriend Recovery wondering why their ex boyfriends still have some of their pictures up. It drives them nuts because they can’t figure out whether or not their ex still has feelings for them or if he is just keeping the pictures for sentimental reasons.

They are literally drawn more into their exes because they can’t quite solve the riddle and that is exactly what we want from your ex girlfriend.

We want her to be so drawn to figuring you out that she gives you more attention then any ex should probably deserve.

A Word On Status Updates

Posting a status update on Facebook is kind of like a subtle art. You see, there is a right way to post an update and a wrong way to post an update. Oh, and to take things a step further there is also a right way about how you approach the amount of updates you post and a wrong way to approach it.

In this section I am going to give you some perfect guidelines on how you should be approaching status updates if you want to re attract your ex girlfriend.

Lets start with what you should be posting about.

What Kind Of Updates You Should Post

Most men post sappy updates about how they feel after a breakup.

“Today is rough…”

or

“Don’t cross oceans for people who wouldn’t jump puddles for you…”

Oh, and how could I forget one of my favorite type of updates (sarcasm obviously,) song lyrics.

Yes, there are some men out there that will post the lyrics to a certain song that describes exactly how they are feeling. Again, these songs usually have a common theme, life sucks now but its going to get better.

DO NOT POST UPDATES LIKE THESE.

Not only are you going to give your ex the satisfaction of knowing that she is on your mind constantly but everyone is going to look at you as being one of “those” people that post “those” types of updates. Instead of posting about how you are feeling I challenge you to post about what you are doing.

For example, if you are about to go on a vacation to Hawaii or something make sure you post an update about that.

You want to project an image as if everything is fine on Facebook.

Now, you have to be careful about being too fine because then it will look like you are trying too hard. This brings me to my next point.

The Frequency Of Status Updates

There are a certain segment of people on Facebook that annoy me to no end.

Care to take a wild guess at what segment I am talking about?

If you guessed the people who feel the need to post multiple status updates every single day then you guessed correctly.

I don’t know what it is about these people that get on my nerves. In real life they are lovely people but maybe their constant need to seek attention through updates annoys me. Look, I am all for posting an update here or there if something interesting happens but you are going overboard if you are going to post an update every single day (sometimes multiple times throughout the day.)

Essentially what you are admitting to the world if you are posting 10 updates on Facebook every single day is that you have no life at all or that your life simply revolves around finding things to update the world on.

Nevertheless, as I said above updates can be a powerful weapon when it comes to winning back your girlfriend. So, what are the right amount of updates to post?

Should you do one every day?

I don’t think you should post an update on Facebook every day because if that annoys me then that is going to annoy everyone else on your friends list including your ex.

Every other day?

Every other day is a bit too much still in my opinion. While it is nowhere near as bad as posting an update every day some people can still get a little annoyed at every other day updates.

Every week?

Ironically, posting just one update every single week is not enough. I think you probably need to post more than just one update every single week.

Every month?

Again, this suffers from the same problem in that you need to post more updates than just one every single month.

So, what is the perfect amount of updates to post?

Turns out 2 a week should do the trick.

This hovers the line of posting too much and posting too little perfectly! It isn’t too much but rather just enough and that is exactly what we are looking for here.

Adding New Friends (Particularly Girls)

Here’s an interesting question.

Is it a good idea to go out of your way to add new friends (who are women) on your Facebook profile after a breakup?

Well, in order to answer that properly I feel we have to take a trip into the mind of a woman.

Lets use you and your ex girlfriend as an example. Lets say that after your breakup with your ex you decide to pimp out your Facebook profile by doing everything that this page recommends. Of course, one of those things is to add new friends.

You think to yourself,

“You know, I bet if I add some new friends who are girls on my Facebook my ex girlfriend will get jealous.”

Now, in my opinion a little jealousy in a relationship can be a good thing.

The way I look at it is if someone gets jealous it means that they care. Of course, as I explained in my jealousy article you have to be extremely careful about not going overboard with it. Of course, when it comes to adding women friends on Facebook there is another thing you have to take into account.

Look at the situation from your ex girlfriends perspective.

The two of you just broke up and all of a sudden you start adding a bunch of girls on Facebook. Most likely your ex girlfriend isn’t going to think,

“Who are these women? Do they have a crush on him? Is he dating them???”

Rather she is going to think something like,

“Wow, he is really pathetic… he’s actually trying to make me jealous.”

So, this begs the original question.

Is it even a good idea to add new friends who are women on Facebook after the breakup?

Absolutely!

However, you need to do it in a certain way that makes it more natural.

The Rules For Adding New Friends On Facebook

(If you need more advice on getting your girlfriend back make sure you read my book.)

The first thing you need to be aware of is the frequency of which you are adding new friends.

For example, if you are adding a crazy amount of friends every day it is going to look like you are trying too hard to prove a point to your ex girlfriend. The smarter play would be to add just a few new friends every single week. You shouldn’t add more than five a week but even five is kind of pushing it.

Remember, the name of the game here is to make things look as natural as possible.

Of course, adding friends on Facebook won’t be very natural if you are simply just adding all women.

Think of it like this. If your ex girlfriend decides to snoop around and take a look at your profile and she sees that in the past two weeks you have added ten new friends and they have all been very attractive women she is going to think to herself,

“Wow, he is really trying to prove a point to me isn’t he?”

This is why I would recommend that you shouldn’t just add all women. Mix some men in there to make things look more natural.

So, instead of her opening up your Facebook and seeing you adding ten women she is going to see that you have an even split of five men and five women.

Now, I understand that you may be a little hesitant to add men since men aren’t going to really make her jealous. However, I assure you that those five women you added in those two weeks will be enough to make her curious enough to spy on them (the women you added.)

Once you get your ex doing that you are in a very good position.

Ways To Incite Some Healthy Jealousy On Facebook

If you haven’t already read my guide on jealousy I highly recommend you take a few minutes out of your day to educate yourself on the proper way to make a girlfriend jealous so that it benefits your relationship (yes, it’s possible.)

Facebook is a jealous haven.

Pretty much every action that your significant other does on Facebook is carefully watched and dissected. It’s unfortunate because it creates a lot of insecurity in relationships but we are getting off topic here.

I suppose the best way to start this section off is by explaining why making your ex girlfriend a little jealous is beneficial to you in getting her back.

Why It’s Important To Make Her A Little Jealous

Do you remember what I said a few sections ago?

A little jealousy in a relationship can be a good thing

Why is it a good thing though?

Think of it this way. If your ex girlfriend never got jealous during your relationship it probably means she didn’t care enough to get jealous and that is a very bad thing.

Why?

Because it technically means that she would be ok with you hanging out with other women or cheating on her which the last time I checked is NOT an ok thing to do.

Of course, I have a feeling that your ex is capable of jealousy (almost every woman is.)

So, that means that if you can make her a little jealous through Facebook then that means that she looks at you in a light where she still very much cares about you.

Jealousy Method 1- Liking Another Girls Status (Use Sparingly)

One way that you can bring out some feelings of jealousy within your ex girlfriend is to like another girls status on Facebook.

Now, I am already assuming that your ex is keeping a close eye on your Facebook habits with this one so that means that you liking someone else’s status is probably going to show up on her Facebook feed so she is going to be made aware of it.

Of course, one thing I feel compelled to point out is to not go overboard with this.

For example, if you go on a liking spree and just like everything in sight then the chances are pretty high that you are going to project an image that you are trying to make your ex jealous and that is not what we want, her to think you are trying to make her jealous.

What I would recommend you do is pick out a friend of yours that is quite attractive and like her status.

This should do the trick.

Jealousy Method 2- Commenting On Another Girls Wall

This is essentially the same concept as liking another girls status except instead of pressing the like button you are going to actually think of something to say to one of your more attractive friends and write it on her wall.

What is the purpose of doing this?

Imagine for a moment that you and one of your attractive “girl” friends have a conversation in public on Facebook for everyone to see. Your ex girlfriend, who is Facebook spying on you sees this conversation and thinks to herself,

“I KNEW IT!! I knew he liked her.”

Emotional women are quick to jump to wrong conclusions because they can sometimes let their minds run wild with all kinds of crazy possibilities. We kind of want this to happen with your ex girlfriend because if it does happen then that means there is a part of her that is jealous that you are giving attention to someone else that is not her (even though you two are broken up.)

This begs the question,

What are you supposed to say to one of your “girl” friends on Facebook?

If I was you I would stay away from anything too flirty because this can backfire on you in two different ways.

You can really make your ex angry to the point where she may not want you back anymore.

You can get rejected in public by your friend and that’s going to hurt your ego.

Try to keep things very light and casual.

Maybe tell your friend about an episode you saw on TV that made you think of her. Something like that is always interesting but mainstream enough to not be viewed as flirty.

Jealousy Method 3- Take A Picture With Another Girl And Post It

I am going to be completely honest with you.

I am a little split on how I feel about this one.

On the one hand if you really want to make your ex girlfriend jealous then this is definitely going to do the trick. On the other hand, seeing you take a picture with another girl and posting it on Facebook may tick off your ex so much that she doesn’t want you back.

A few things to note.

Before you do anything like this I want you to be aware of the consequences that go along with it.

It is entirely possible that you posting a picture on Facebook with another girl can make your ex so upset that she doesn’t want you back anymore. Of course, it is also possible that it could make her so jealous that she sends you a barrage of text messages in an attempt to get you back after she “realized what she lost.”

So, essentially this is a high risk, high reward tactic.

Now, before I move on I do want to point out that there are a few rules that you are going to have to abide by if you are going to attempt this.

The first rule is that you can’t post any “racy” pictures of you kissing, hugging or groping a girl. So, anything that looks like this is a big no no,

The type of photo that you should be posting is one that clearly states that you and the girl are just friends. A photo that looks like that will look like this,

Notice how the two people in the photo aren’t touching each other in any way shape or form. They are simply taking a picture together. A photo like that is more than enough to do the trick to make your ex jealous.

Remember though, there could be consequences so make sure you think a lot about this before you try it.

The Rest Of The Puzzle

I told you at the beginning of this guide that Facebook is only one small puzzle piece to a much larger puzzle.

Now, I imagine you came to this website to find a way to get your ex girlfriend back and not just to pimp out your Facebook profile. Well, as much as I would love to tell you what to do right here I feel it isn’t an efficient use of my time as I have already slaved away on a game plan for getting a girlfriend back.

If you are looking for an actual step by step guide that tells you everything you need to know about getting your girlfriend back I suggest you take a look at this guide as it will take you through the entire ex recovery process from start to finish.

I would also recommend taking a look at some of the other articles I have written on this site as they will give you insight into how to successfully pull of the challenging task of winning an ex girlfriend back.

Oh, and I am actively updating this site pretty much every day so if you ever have any questions you can simply ask me in the comments section below.

What Do You Think? (174)

Victor

June 22, 2017

3 months ago, I met a girl. She is 25 (I’m 31), project manager in the beauty and cosmetic industry, good looking with a life similar to mine. We both click really fast. I would describe the time we spent together, as being simple, light and not complicated at all. She was affectionate with me in any sense, same for me and she was always telling me that she had a good time and thanking when I was taking her on date. Before meeting me, she was in a relationship for 5 years and single for 1 1/2 years.

Both of us wanted to take it slow and go with the flow but I guess even it’s what I ultimately wanted my actions didn’t spoke that way. After having date for 1 month 1/2, I went alone on 3 weeks trip in Asia.

While being in Asia, I was still giving her news, on phone or text every 2-3 days. At the time I was still feeling we were still connected but quickly I started feeling she was distancing from me, she was not answering my text and not trying to reach me. When I was back I call her, ask her what was going one, if she was seing someone else, acting as kid! She told that she was feeling I was trying to put her in a commitment situation, having to justify her action to me and that she was 25 and not feeling ready to be in a relationship…We met the same week. She told me that that I had all the qualities she is looking to be on relationship and I was to her rather the type of guy she would go in relationship with rather than just dating.

I manage to do No Contact only 1 week, and I end up calling her again saying that I was missing her, that I was not understanding what happened because everything was going well before I left…I even text one of her closest friend (stupid move)

We spoke later spoke about this, she off course knew I texted her friend. She told that kind of action was making her “scare” and probably it would be better if we stop reaching for a while. I think it was the first since the break that I was truly seing the thing I was doing from her perspective. I told her that I was sorry and that I knew that right know I was acted needy, coming to strong on her, and not really giving the time she need. Basically I told her that I was understanding her, her perspective. The more I was agree with her the more she was trying to defend my actions saying that she know I wanted to make thing good, that probably the fact that she was not answering when I was calling her was not helping me. I just told her that one the thing I liked about her when we first met, was she had a life style (work, friends, etc…) and I understand I was not her priority giving the current situation. I was really at that time on the same line as her, I was almost ending every sentence she was saying.

She was leaving in 2 weeks in Europe and would be there for 3 weeks. So I told her that I was agree with her, that I will stop shit like I was doing, give her space and time for if she decide to give us a chance to re start thing between us, it would be because she will decide it and not because I decide it and if she to talk about this when she is back to let me know.

So far, it have been almost 2 weeks of no contact. I went back to the gym, hanging out with my friends, meeting others people etc…basically having the same exiting life I had before/while I meet her. I unfollow her on Fb and she still liking some of my posts.

EGR Team Member: Amor

July 6, 2017

dont chase and dont try to convince her.. it’s like begging.. just slowly build rapport after nc while you continue having your own life.

Craig Hamilton

April 29, 2017

Hi, I broke up with my girlfriend about a week ago. Initially I started it as a mutual thing and she seemed to agree. But then we were kissing and reminiscing for a few hours before I left. She even spoke about fantasising about a wedding. I left and all of it felt so wrong despite thinking it was right before. I returned just half hour or so later (uninvited) to tell her I completely regret the decision) she was not happy and asked me to leave. Two days later I dropped some things off at her place (in response to something I saw on Facebook as she wasn’t talking to me and hasn’t done so since the break up) I noticed she was in and had taken the day off work but I panicked and knew it was too soon to see her so I left the gifts at her door, knocked and went off. Later she had a friend contact me telling her to give her space with everything that had happened. Another friend told me she also didn’t like the idea of me initiating the break up even though she said the feeling was mutual. I havn’t spoken to her since, we’re still on Facebook but she has already changed her status to single. I am sticking to no contact to let the air breathe but I am confused about how to proceed and the feelings are quite raw making me anxious. She also suffers from Anxiety so showing up unannounced was definitely the wrong thing to have done. Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated, I know I messed up, I know time needs to pass and I need to stay busy but have I done too much? The idea of her mentioning a wedding dress made me realise how much that future with her would be perfect and that initiating break up came from fear of past problems. But I realise it was the perfect time to move forward with her, as everything was great. What an idiot.

EGR Team Member: Amor

Nathan

June 15, 2017

What about liking, or not liking her status updates?

EGR Team Member: Amor

June 15, 2017

if you’re in no contact period, dont..

Jeffrey

February 21, 2017

I hit it off with this girl when we first met and we became very close. We moved to different parts of the world and played our hands with long distance. We enjoyed each other’s company very much and even managed to connect further despite the distance between us. About a year into the relationship, she became distant and I found out she was in a relationship with someone else. I was overcome with a feeling helplessness from my place several thousand miles away, but I tried to act rationally (unsuccessfully) rather than on impulse when I found out. I calmly brought up that I had found out she was with someone and asked her to verify if that was correct information. She responded honestly, which I appreciated, that she was in fact with someone, and that she was very sorry. I made the biggest mistake at this point of trying to make her feel guilty about what had happened. (I should note that we weren’t on concretely established relationship terms, but the impression of seeking a physical relationship with each other upon coming together was there for both of us). I realized my mistake in trying to make her feel guilty, however, and quickly adjusted my behavior when I noticed her trying to push me away. I didn’t contact her for several weeks (3-4) and I received no response. I began posting interesting things happening in my life on Facebook and she, at one point, messaged me “I miss you so much”, to which I calmly responded to, rather than reciprocating with “I miss you so much too”. I distanced myself and didn’t respond very quickly to her texts. She noticed this and became angry with me, saying “Jeffrey???” “Hello?” “You don’t want to talk to me?”. At this point, I started conversing (through text) a little bit with her, and after the seemingly positive interaction, I noticed she was again pretty unresponsive. I messaged her a few days later pointing out that something reminded me of her, to which she responded positively, but very little (in the form of 1 word texts) and she wasn’t willing to keep up any conversation. I’ve been consistently posting status updates (about 2 a week) for a few weeks now. The last very short conversation we had went like this: “____ reminded me of you”, “lol I think about you too”, one playful banter message from me (nothing very clever), followed by silence from her (for 10 days now). In those 10 days she’s liked 1 of the 2 Facebook posts that I posted. (Note: The one she liked related to me participating in an activity I know she enjoys – I believe she liked it for the activity rather than because it involved me. I think this because this has been the case for the posts I’ve made over the past few months). She has liked one of my posts in the 10 days since ignoring my text. I really do miss her but I feel like I’ve run out of options. She’s single now but seems uninterested in me. We never broke up or had any emotional outbursts, but the relationship has definitely ceased. I’m willing to keep working to change myself if necessary, but I sincerely need advice.

EGR Team Member: Amor

February 23, 2017

Hi Jeffrey,

if she’s single now, then you should initiate more to build rapport.

Tom

February 17, 2017

Hi Team,

I recently had a somewhat mutual breakup with my ex this past weekend. We dated for 13 months and until the last 3 or 4 weeks it was really going well. She works full time for a university and is doing an MBA and I’m working two jobs. Despite how busy we sound, we made it work like this for months. We had moments where we communicated about how hard it was from time to time, but the truth is we did a good job of negotiating boundaries and figuring out how to spend quality time together.

3ish weeks ago, when it started becoming inevitable that we would split up, we took it in stride and were intentional that last weekend would be out final as a couple. It was a little awkward, but also very romantic. I wanted to continue to work on our relationship, but the attraction was lost on her part. She was ready to fully pursue her work and school. We both admitted we needed to spend time getting back in touch with things significant to us. So it was somewhat mutual. We have the same group of friends so it is likely we’ll see each other again.

I am in no contact. She contacted me twice; once on Valentines day to say she hoped I was ok with a sentimental comment and the other was to say she wouldn’t be out (we are part of running club) and wouldn’t be able to see me. Both times I replied cordially and closed-ended, but have not initiated contact.

My question is, how do I go about no contact if I am sure to see her? I won’t initiate contact, but is it against NC if I like the same status on FB? What is the best NC way of running into her in public? Sorry for the backstory, hope it offers some context.

EGR Team Member: Amor

Yes, you have to restart the count because nc means no replying, no initiating and no social media stalking. So, if you see her in person just reply politely direct if she talks to you..

Steven

December 4, 2016

Hi there –

A quick scenario for you to look at tell me what you think. I was dating this girl, quite a few years younger than I. We met in University last year and were dating then, I’ve since graduated and moved away to a town a few hours away. I have always committed to driving to see her and spend time with her, but because a lot of her close friends disprove of the relationship mostly because of the age gap and we have had to keep our relationship secret – which was not a good thing for her. We are now broken up, but my concern is I don’t have a typically vibrant social media lifestyle, and I’m scared that with her actively trying to move on from this relationship I’ll have no relevancy in her life. How can I remain relevant in her life without speaking or talking with her? Will taking random photos be enough – I don’t get those high end likes and views, and comments. I’ll update a picture but it won’t get as much attention as something she could update or upload. I always trend towards a couple likes and comments…but what is enough to spark curiosity?

EGR Team Member: Amor

take it as a restart.. Improve yourself so you can be more attractive.. so she can see you in a different light.

John

February 6, 2017

Quick question. What if you like your Ex girlfriends FB post during a time of no contact. Does that mean I have broken no contact and was it a bad mistake. Please help lol

EGR Team Member: Amor

February 6, 2017

Hi John,

yes you have broken it..dont focus in the bad, just restart the count..

steve

December 3, 2016

Hi There,

Broke up with my girlfriend a month ago – she asked for time and space. We used to go to the same college together, but I’ve since graduated and she has a couple more years to go. I occasionally go back to visit, and once time I said hey i’d like to see you – she said no but then eventually said yes and we went for coffee and it was wonderful. our communication was lukewarm, not consistent and eventually she said she wants to move on from this relationship because she’s too dependent on me. All fine by me, but if she’s actively taking steps to avoid loving me and having feelings for me – how do I improve my Facebook appearance and image? I’m out of sight and out of mind, and I’m not really in the area of meeting new friends and people who will fall in love with my Facebook photo…

EGR Team Member: Amor

take it as a restart.. Improve yourself so you can be more attractive.. so she can see you in a different light.

Tim

November 20, 2016

What do you do if your ex unfriended you on Facebook and it was a few weeks after the break-up?

During that time you didn’t post anything yourself and your ex hadn’t posted anything. You were tagged in posts and were liking various types of stuff including engagement photos of other friends. Essentially using Facebook like usual.

Also the relationship was great, together for almost a year. There were no warning signs or red flags, pretty much a 180 type situation. You never sent mean texts or attempted to over call afterwards. You tried contacting your ex to understand why the break-up happened but they just got mad. The only thing you know is they are super quite and not telling anyone anything.

EGR Team Member: Amor

so she has commitment issues? When did you break up? Even if you didn’t talk, do you want to try the no contact rule and start improving yourself?

Tim

December 5, 2016

I will see how things go and try to focus on school for now.

EGR Team Member: Amor

December 15, 2016

That’s good Tim.. That’s the right action to do

Alexander

November 11, 2016

Hey Chris, As of about 8 days ago, my now ex-girlfriend & I of about 8 months broke up. I firmly believe that we were both very much in love with each other (there was probably a lot of comfort in companionship, too, but there was definitely something there). Early on in the relationship I made the mistake of ‘kissing a boob’ of a random girl while out of town for a music fest with my friend, who was dating my GF’s best friend. This happening very shortly after taking her virginity (I myself hadn’t slept with anyone for 2 years before meeting her). When I told her, she acted like it was not that big of a deal, but I realized later that it bothered her more than she let me know. Months of mostly happiness together went by with many sleepovers at each other’s houses (90% her house). All the while I gained somewhat of a relationship with her parents, as well as her brother, whom I was already acquainted with. All the while, I was (and still am) on legal probation, which is actually what allowed me to see her at the same day & time every day, since she lived close to the office I have to go to. I made the mistake of not nipping my klepto/shoplifting problem in the bud while we were dating & ended up getting caught at a store attempting to take stuff. This being after I got her a number of things (a fry-pan, a shirt, etc.) that I had taken from a store. After the incident, months went by of me worrying about getting my probation violated & I rubbed off a lot of my worry/anxiety on her. She realized that I had a problem with not just that, but also self-medicating (mostly weed & also alcohol) & eventually I think it got to her & she realized I had a lot of shit I had to get together. I told her that if, G-d forbid, I had to go away for a little while, be it a week, a month or 6 months, I would understand if she wanted to see other people, considering she wouldn’t be able to be with me. About 4 days before my birthday (which was 1.5 weeks since I was at her house & maybe 5 days since she slept at mine), when she was ending it with me on the phone (dumping me, really), she said how I have problems that I need to fix & she has a lot of self-reflection she has to do herself, because me & my problems are basically a LOT to deal with. However, despite her making it sound like more of a time away from each other to better ourselves type of breakup, I’m skeptical due to the fact that she almost immediately upon ending it, changed her FB relationship status to single, took her 2 pictures with me in it off her IG & was already hanging out with a guy & his friend whom she mentioned as a good friend when we went out. She even posted a picture of the 3 of them at a football game, possibly on MY BIRTHDAY. Rewind some days, to around Halloween, she was out downtown hanging out with her 2 girlfriends & the 2 guys. She apparently had wanted me to meet him… Maybe to meet my eventual replacement? (Considering she probably thought I was likely “going away” soon). Forward to recently, she apparently cried a lot & even onto the shoulder of this replacement/rebound guy -_________- THAT KILLS ME (as much or even more than the deleting me from her life thing). You might be asking, why would I even WANT someone so heartless & cold back in my life!?!… Someone who basically ruined my birthday & my ego & stomped on my heart… Someone who might not care about me as much I thought. LOVE Chris, deep heartfelt love. I keep thinking that she’s just hanging out with this guy & deleting pics & all just to help her grieving process… I’m almost at 9 days since the phone breakup & almost 5 days of NC… It’s extremely difficult. Assuming that I fear the worst about court in 3 days, would it make sense to leave her a heartfelt letter/message explaining how we obviously had something special & throwing it all away in a flash would be a tragedy & that this time apart will probably be best for both of us & give us the time to see if it really was love & not lust & whether or not it’s worth saving..? Maybe even mention that we could start over, from where we started, as friends & potentially rebuild… Because while it will only be a week of NC when I would send the letter, I would probably otherwise give up the opportunity to talk to her for a while & only risk helping her forget me & fall for this guy-friend motherlover. HELP ME CHRIS!!! I’m sorry for the length but understand my struggle! My heart is SHATTERED </3

EGR Team Member: Amor

November 14, 2016

Hi Alexander,

did you send the letter?

Leland R.

September 22, 2016

Wait, so I read the whole article and didn’t get a clear answer on what to do if I already removed her from Facebook.

I told her I would need to remove her for a while. My mistake. I basically told her I was going to break contact. That was only 4 days ago. So when and how should I go about adding her on Facebook again?