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Dear Tech Support

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Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow
down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery
applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 but Installed undesirable programs
such as Test Cricket 5.0 and NRL 3.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer
runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running
Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Regards,
Desperate

Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband
1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command:
C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME
and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.
If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the
applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence
2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will
create Snoring Loudly WAV files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install
Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not
supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7. Another program you may consider is
Wild Passion 2.4, however this has been known to cause a collapse in
hardware over time.
Good Luck

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