Paying for It

One of the ARC’s that arrived yesterday got me thinking and I have a question for you.

Sadly this isn’t a poll since LAWSON & GWEN are evoooollllllllllll and haven’t figured out how I can do the nifty thing I want that will allow people to vote through RSS feed. This makes me sad. I know… you cry for me too… uh sorry I digress

Honestly I have NO CLUE if this question really has anything to do with the ARC since I haven’t really sat down to look at it and will talk more about the book in question after I do.

Is paying for sex erotic? Is that a fantasy of many women?

My thought it is a control thing, which oddly I could get on board with that. Or maybe too many veiwings of American Giggalo *g*. Either way I am not saying anything about the book or the plot, just something that popped into my head.

Paying for it would not be erotic for me. Just the opposite. I only want people who want to be with me. However, if there were someone who wanted to be with me and I was in position to lavish on them, that wouldn’t bother me unless I would end up being taken advantage of.

Like Sarah though, I think anonymous encounters are very erotic. Or being payed for sex that I would do for free anyway with a stranger would be a huge turn on.

I would think — and this is just a guess here — that having that kind of money would be a power trip. I also think that it would be freeing for some women to behave in a way that has mostly belonged to men. She gets to pick the man. She’s paid, she’s in charge. She can make him whatever she wants for the night and then send him on his way. He’ll never disappoint her and never hurt her. Plus, you can have the ‘sex with a stranger’ fantasy without worrying about disease or getting raped because these guys are tested and this is a job to them.

Yeah, I can see where the sum of all those things might be REALLy appealing from a character perspective.

I read a gigolo’s blog. At least I think he’s a gigolo. He may simply be a male prostitute. Six of one, half dozen of the other, I guess.

Anyway, I read this blog and he really loves what he does. I wouldn’t mind paying someone like him. His attitude is a complete turn on. He has a “regular” job and does the paid-for-sex thing as well because he likes it.

LOL sarah I don’t know HOW many of us have ‘given it thought’ I was sort of huh what? Really? why… that is soooooo not erotic! Then stopped to think about it and was oh well I guess I could see it turning someones crank.

MB interesting didn’t think of being paid part. As a whole I was thinking women would have issue with it cuz we tend to be more messy emotionally. Then thought well hmmm dunno.

Kathryn can I sign up for the having the money to be able to do it regardless of if I could/would/want too *eg*

Gwen he is prolly 600 pounds, lives in his moms basement and tis all made up

My thought it is a control thing, which oddly I could get on board with that.

that having that kind of money would be a power trip.

Those are very interesting points.

See, I think/feel that a man being really turned on by me does make me feel in control and can make me feel really powerful. More powerful than if I were paying some guy who might have to pretend that he’s getting off on me.

And when I think of women who can pay for sex, I usually think of much older women buying much younger men and for some reason that smacks of patheticness. Although, frankly, more power to them. I’m an older woman and of course, if I weren’t married, I would absolutely love to be with a hot young stud muffin. Who wouldn’t? But I would feel a bit dirty and a bit a looser if I had to pay some young guy to get it on with me when he wouldn’t give me the time of day otherwise.

But I can see how it would be nice to not have the messy emotional crap. Just a paid friend with benefits.

Sybil, I just realized I made no sense in my last sentence. Must have been late at night! I also just watched, and reviewed, a movie about a guy who is a call bloke and it was really interesting. It is called Boy Culture.

I’ve thought about it in the vague sense, certainly. But nope, I could never do it. Too many intangibles.
HBO had a decent doc a month or so back, Heidi Fleiss was trying to open a male bordello in Pahrump. It would have been interesting to see whether or not it was successful, but Fleiss had too many “personal issues” to get the business off the ground.

Since we have been talking about it on Twitter… I DO think Suddenly You works totally. But I think a large part of that has to do with how Lisa Kleypas set up the plot.

And on that note (and a contemp one) I LOVE LOVE LOVE Fallen From Grace by Laura Leone

In general though my pondering had more to do with the idea this was a common female fantasy. And wondering if that was true. Still not sure what I think of that but as you can see it can work or me in a book regardless.

My first thought was it might work in the hands of the right author — and then I came across Kathryn’s comments. If one of my faves like Kathryn tried it, I’d definitely read it and more than likely it would be a great read. But in the hands of a lesser author, nope, have no desire to go that route at all.