Debrett's top 10 tips for British restaurant etiquette

Debrett's, the UK's number one authority on etiquette, provides the ultimate guide on modern manners in the Handbook. Here, we're taking a sneak peek into the eating and drinking etiquette section.

When ordering…

1. 'Asking for food that is not on the menu, or for food that is listed to be cooked or served a special way is increasingly common as so many people follow diets or have allergies or intolerances.' It can, however, be rude to the host to make too much of a fuss or to hold everyone up, so keep it brief and include the host, explaining and apologising, rather than monopolising the waiter with complex demands. 2. 'The waiter will normally bring the wine list to the person they perceive as the host or organiser.' Guests may respond if asked about particular likes or dislikes but should not try to take charge unless they are invited to do so - if, for example, they are respected wine connoisseurs. 3. 'It is usual for the person who has invited the guests or suggested the dinner to pay.' If this is not the case then this should be made clear when the evening is being planned. If a large group of friends is sharing the bill then it is best to have an outline agreement, such as sticking to the set menu or only having one course. The normal thing is to divide the bill equally at the end and not to argue about what any one person has ordered.

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When complaining...

4. 'If things go wrong then complaining is not rude.' It should be undertaken firmly but discreetly. If food needs to be sent back or wine is corked, mention it immediately. If a bill is wrong then point this out but do not spoil the occasion and embarrass others.

When tipping...

5. 'Many restaurants include service, in which case a tip is not necessary other than for exceptional service.' It is traditional to leave 10 per cent, but up to 15 per cent is now commonplace for good service. Try to have a coin for cloakroom attendants.

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When drinking...

6. 'The most fundamental requirement in pubs is to respect the rules of buying rounds.' Be sensitive to the occasion and go with the flow, not ordering complicated cocktails when others are drinking lager. There is no need to be persuaded to drink alcohol and non-drinkers must never be put under pressure to do so. 7. 'Respect the atmosphere of the individual pub and be aware that regulars may have places they regard as their territory.' Some pubs encourage joining in and others are more like restaurants where it would be unusual to talk to strangers. Large, dominant groups should not be allowed to dictate the ambience. 8. 'Tips are not necessary when just drinking in pubs.' However, bar staff who have been particularly helpful may be bought a drink. If, however, you have eaten in a pub and received table service, it is appropriate to leave a tip.

When with children...

9. 'The suitability of a restaurant or pub - food, ambience, space - should be considered carefully when children are involved.' Young children who accompany adults to restaurants or pubs in the evening should be especially quiet and well-behaved. Children should be able to sit up at the table for the duration of the meal or drink, without being disruptive. If they are very fidgety, then a parent or adult can take them for a walk or quiet look around. 10. 'Groups of teenagers or young people should avoid intruding on other people's space.' Especially if they are standing and others are seated. The ambience of the pub should be respected and, if necessary, noise levels moderated.