“I’ve learned people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget the way you made them feel,” by Maya Angelou.

Yesterday, I challenged myself to ask “why” all day. I started with why was I eating an apple with my oatmeal? I didn’t eat the apple because it was healthy or yummy. In the middle of all my why questions I got to “because it’s about to go bad if I don’t” and almost stopped. But this wasn’t really the reason I ate it. I’ve had apples go “bad”. I just toss them on the compost pile and feel good that either the bunnies are going to get a treat or I’ll have compost in the spring. So I asked why again. Why is it so important to eat this particular apple at this particular time? Answer: Because this particular apple was given to me by a friend with some other food that she cleaned out of her fridge to give to me before she went on vacation. I ate it on the day she returned. She had taken the time as she tried to finish packing and align things for her family to exist without her at home and work — to bring me food. Eating the apple was accepting her kindness as she sacrificed time and energy to share with me. So why did I eat the apple?: Because I love my friend.

Today’s intention really comes from writing my post HTMYHLTOAB: Perfume/Cologne. I embedded a video on altruism, I hope you’ll all watch it (the first minute is distressing). These two issues really collided for me and not at first in a perceived positive way. I viewed my career as a science teacher to be my form of altruism. I taught children how to love and respect their environment. I also made enough money that I was able to donate to charities. I had first watched Peter Singer’s video on altruism a few years ago and had decided that I indeed would donate 10% of my income to charity. But my disability from MCS took away my teaching career and 10% of zero income is zero.

Today’s Intention: Use my blog to share stories of altruism. These might be things I’ve done in the past or events I’ve read about and I hope altruistic acts my fellow bloggers are willing to share. I feel like doing this would be like having an “income of love” but instead of monetary income that I saved up in a bank, this income will be immediately shared.

If you want to share some love — write me a comment about altruism or give a link to a story you’ve written on your blog and I’ll link to it or reblog it. Please note there is no levels to love or altruism — if the act took 5 minutes to accomplish or 5 years — share it — love is always important. I saw on the news last night a little boy gave his tooth fairy money to charity — now tell me everyone hearing that didn’t feel the love.

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9 thoughts on “Day 10 In the Pursuit of Love”

Sometimes money is the easiest thing for people to donate. They write a check and they can cross it off their list. I admire people who check on their elderly neighbor daily, or write a note to a friend, or pick up trash when they go on a walk, or smile at everyone they encounter, etc. Those acts that can take time and conscious effort. There are a lot of little things that people do that really make a difference and chances are that no one knows about it. But that elderly neighbor, or the recipient of the note or the smiles know about those acts and those acts can change lives.

It always amazed me when we had food drives at school, the first kids to bring in food to donate were the kids we were collecting the food for. One of the things I miss about walking our bridges is it took me by two of our senior apartment complexes. So many of the seniors went for a walk and seemed so withdrawn inside themselves. I tried to always take the time to look them in the eye, smile and say hi. What an amazing difference in their posture and the smile on their faces — wow was it worth it for those few minutes of my time. Your comment is so great because it gives so many ideas that people can do to be altruistic giving up little time or money. I hope once people start it will become addictive and they won’t want to stop. 😀

I hesitated to reply to this post because I didn’t want anyone to think I was blowing my own trumpet. I’ve decided to write now because I’ve reflected on it and found a way to balance the trumpet blowing.
I try to help people, in small ways, whenever I can but I don’t talk about it afterwards. However, a small part of me is always hoping that someone is watching. 🙂 There has been an old Eastern European woman begging in my local town for years and I often drop a coin into her hat. However it was ages before I realised that I didn’t know her name, or anything about her. I found her a little scary and people would warn me that I shouldn’t encourage her (like I was giving a pigeon breadcrumbs or something), that beggars were thieves and cheats, and so on. But I figured, if she had enough money, why would she sit out on the street in the cold and rain while people walked past and tried to ignore her? Last year I plucked up the courage to talk to her. Her name is Marie and she has a huge number of grandchildren who she dotes on. Her sons are having trouble finding enough work to look after their children. She told me where she came from but I can’t remember now; I have a bad memory for that kind of thing. The thing I do remember though is how her scary face transformed when she started talking to me. People talk about faces lighting up but it was the first time I really understood what it meant. She was radiant and her smile was beautiful. She told me how her back hurt because of all the sitting so after I finished talking to her I went to the chemist (drug store) and bought some analgesic ointment for her. I felt that she would spend every last penny she had on her family but not on herself so I wanted to make sure she got something for herself. I’m not sure if it was any use to her but I wanted her to know that someone had listened and cared about her.
Now here’s the balance. 🙂 The last time I saw Marie (it was before Xmas) I had a quick chat with her. A woman came alongside and dropped a big carrier bag of food into Marie’s lap. It was clear that this was not the first time. She didn’t stop to chat but Marie was smiling at her. My reaction? Was I glad that Marie had other benefactors? No, I was put out, maybe jealous. I guess I didn’t feel so special anymore. Marie didn’t need me as much as I thought she did. I don’t know really but I felt bad, and then I felt bad about feeling bad. 🙂

Seems like Marie turned the tables on you and became your benefactor. A benefactor of unconditional love. Especially when I’m doing my blogging I get this “message” “Just make sure you know why you’re doing it. Are you doing it for yourself or for the greater good?” I have to admit, I really have to pause and consider — am I doing this so people will like me or because it serves some higher purpose than just me. I think it is totally okay to accept accolades, awards, compensation for the acts we do BUT I think the important part is that I don’t do anything with that intent in mind. It was brave and powerful of you to admit your “humanness”. I’m getting a little better when I’m in a situation like your’s of laughing at myself and saying, “hmmm that was an ego moment for sure.” And Marie most definitely needed you — think of all that joy and energy she radiated out into the world with that smile she shared with you and because of you. I find when I am feeling balanced and life is going in a good direction — along comes an earth angel like Marie who makes me pause and throws me slightly off balance shows me that I have to dig a little deeper to get rid of the negative stuff that I was totally positive I had already gotten rid of. 😀 The only thing I know for certain is the world is a better place for having you in it. Have a great night, Sarah. 😀

The great thing is you are aware of your “ego”. Once we become aware then we can become mindful and then we can become enlightened. You’ve got two of the three and are well on the way to number three. It took me a long time just to realize when the “ego” was stepping in and stealing the show. At first I noticed it in other people and then finally in myself. I read somewhere that there are only about 20 people on the planet who have totally shed their egos and are truly enlightened. I am soooo not one of them but I’m working on it. I hope you a have a day filled with light. 😀

That’s a definite LOL. I used to be quite frustrated with my ego — flare ups of jealousy, insecurity, anger … now I’m finding its my ego which is frustrated with me — I just keep sending my parasitic negativity thriving ego — love and forgiveness. I know if I deprive it of the nastiness fuel it needs to thrive — eventually my ego will fade away — I’m just not certain how many life times it will take to do this 😀 — my ego is definitely a stubborn bugger. Just as I was researching for today’s post, I was reading comments from people saying that MCS is made up — BO is better than fragrance and I immediately went into the “those ignorant so-and-sos. If only they knew how much I’ve suffered from the chemicals in their fragrances… This was moments after my very enlightened comments to you. Time to send love and forgiveness — AGAIN!!!!!!