01 February 2013

Hey, Jews, The Joke’s On You!

By Andrew Klavan

In the light of the comic genius of people like Jack Benny, the Marx
Brothers, and Mel Brooks, it’s sometimes said that Jewish people have an
especially keen sense of humor. Perhaps that would explain why so many
of them voted for Barack Obama. They must’ve been anticipating the
knee-slapping hilarity of Obama pulling the rug out from under them to
send them falling butt first onto the hard floor of his broken promises
where they’d slip on the banana peel of his deceit and go skittering
into the mud pit of his betrayal.

What a chuckle it’s been indeed. Right after winning well over 60% of
the Jewish vote in November, Obama delivered his gut-busting punchline
by nominating former Senator Chuck Hagel to serve as secretary of
Defense. And as if that weren’t funny enough, Hagel is now before the
Senate, where he’ll almost certainly be confirmed.

Now the good news for Jews is that Hagel rhymes with bagel, a tasty
breadstuff much beloved by our Hebraic citizens. The bad news is just
about everything else. Supporters of the former senator have been
reassuring various media outlets that Hageldoesn’t dislike Jewish people.
And I’m sure that’s mighty Christian of him. The problem is he’s not
being asked to dance at a bar-mitzvah. He’s being called to support our
allies and stand up to our enemies and when it comes to the Middle East
he doesn’t seem quite sure about which are which.

Hagel
has complained about the “Jewish lobby,” he’s criticized Israel’s
commitment to peace even as her citizens were being slaughtered by
terrorists, he’s opposed sanctions against Syria and Iran while
describing Israel’s war against terrorist Hezbollah as “the systematic
destruction of an American friend,” meaning Lebanon. He also refused to
sign a 1999 letter condemning Russian anti-semitism, a letter that was
signed by 99 other senators, which by my count is all of them except
Chuck.

Can’t stop laughing? How about this one. Hagel’s supporters say
Hagel’s anti-semitic comments and actions and feelings have been taken
out of context. And that, coincidentally, is just what Egyptian dictator
Mohammed Morsi says about his comments. Morsi, you remember,
is the guy to whom Obama just sent a couple of F-16′s. Which must be
another of the president’s hilarious Jewish jokes, since Morsi’s also
the dude who described Jews as the descendants of apes and pigs. But
like Hagel, Morsi says he wasmisunderstood. After all, who doesn’t love that funny pig in Babe, right? And what about King Kong where that gigantic Jew chased Naomi Watts around. That was fun.

Okay, Obama’s nomination of Hagel — like his weapons aid to Morsi —
may not be in the best traditions of Jewish humor, but this
administration is certainly a joke to anyone who supports our only true
ally in the Middle East.