~ My Spiritual Journey

To Set The Record Straight…

I’ve had a lot of wonderful people approach me through many different social media outlets over the last while. I’ve had compliments, encouragement and I’ve also been told I inspired them. That I’m rocking my fitness journey, some have said they want to be as dedicated to their own health and fitness journeys like I have been for the last bit. I have to say that while I’m both incredibly flattered and grateful for the kind words of support and encouragement, I’m no different than any of you!

Guys, I’m not rocking it, I’m failing forward because I have to, I NEED to!

I don’t take a special pill or anything like that lol! Sure becoming a coach (and the incredibly wonderful community of support it offers) and also my shakes do help me – but I still struggle on the daily!

I struggle with being a good enough wife to my wonderful husband, I fail often at being the Mom I want to (and feel I should) be to my beautiful girls. For me, and as a recovering compulsive overeater I’m hard wired to turn to food when things get tough so I have to make a choice. EVERY-SINGLE-DAY!

Is it hard? HECK YES! Do I want to give up sometimes? OF COURSE I DO! Do I want to go back to that person I was, who I used to be? ABSO-FREAKIN-LUTELY NOT!!

I can’t, I won’t, I REFUSE to – not because it’s easy, not because it’s comfortable or comes naturally. In fact it’s hard, uncomfortable and pushed me out of my comfort zone all the time. I can’t go back to that person I was before – she was angry, she was lost, sad, depressed and miserable. MISERABLE in EVERY sense of the word. When I’m in the food I am NOT a nice person (to put it very lightly), I have a one track mind – FOOD! I obsess about what I can and can’t eat, I get angry and feel resentful, there are so so many negative behaviours that rule me, my thoughts and my actions when I’m not ‘on track.’

I digress…

Now it may sound like I’m punishing myself on this new journey, and this path I’m on but I need to assure you, I’m not.

I really enjoy the person I become when I’m clearer, more focused. Am I perfect? No I’m not but I will not give up. I will fail forward, I will keep going, I will keep pushing.

I already know what it feels like to quit – I’m going to see what happens when I don’t.