The truth about Mars

The mountains of Mars cry out for myths and legends
but its hillbillies took them all away when they floated away under a pale white weather balloon. Some say it was because they couldn’t grow tobacco others claim it was the moonshine tax ,either way they are gone.

The weather is so predictable that all the weathermen left eons ago.
The weatherwomen soon followed in a very stylish red space craft called the Maraganza Tampulea.

Long ago Mars was the center of agriculture ,advertising universally ” named after the god of agriculture ” and it worked .Creatures from far galaxies came to grow 3eyed lettuces and fuzz bark sineaus.
A few centuries of this left the planet rather bleak and so the inhabitants decided to host wars instead of lease land for crops.
Unfortunately this was a very popular idea and so soon there were wars about where wars were to be fought.
Many inhabitants were killed,
as a result war was made illegal.
Three days later and ever since the planet has been uninhabited.