Sunday, March 4, 2012

76; Bad Karma

Okay...before I even get into the photos, I have to explain that they came out pretty shitty on this particular day. My camera's LCD decieved me and made me think the photos were brighter than they actually were, so when I transfered them onto my computer, I didn't expect them to be dark and grainy. (Then again...photos that look dark or vibrant on this desktop screen look drained and muted on Kathryn's laptop. I don't know which one is wrong.) Oh well! I did my best in editing the living hell out of them.

Also, in the beginning of the shoot, the sun was out. Then after a few shots, it hid away and completely changed the lighting of the photos...so I'll be posting those last, mainly so that it's less jarring to go from golden-sunny-bright photos to my pathetic attempt at making my dark-and-cloudy photos look passable.

Bought this dress on my birthday. I had seen it on the UO website but for the longest time, it only had one review saying it was horrible. I happened to find it in the sale section in the UO in Cambridge's Harvard Square, and thought I'd try it on. It's AH-MAZING. I wore this outfit out when I went with Kathryn and some friends out shopping the week before last (the only difference is that I was wearing JC Stevies), and I ended up buying a black lace skirt at the mall that I threw on in the bathroom pretty immediately. I was stopped like, two or three times by random people to be gushed at and complimented. That...never happens. Ever. I kept feeling so uncomfortable and really embarrassed -- not in a bad way, exactly. I just can't comprehend people liking how I look so much. I kept wanting to stop them and say, "thanks and all, I really appreciate it, and Imma let you finish, but please don't waste your time on a dork like me. Go find someone who's ACTUALLY cool and tell them how amazing they are." Because I'm not cool. Not IRL. In person, I'm really loud, rambly, I laugh obnoxiously at everything, I'm immature like hell, awkward like woah... Oh man, I am really lame.

Like...I dunno. It's really hard to say, "I dress so eccentrically for me, not anyone else." Because not many people do that, do they? I have found that most girlies dress up to look appealing to others... But no, I just buy pieces that I think are really freaking awesome, and I wear them for my own enjoyment. So...getting compliments is always a shock. It's like, "you like my hair? Even though I look like I fell asleep underneath a lawn mower? You like what I'm wearing, even though I look like a really culturally confused hooker? Whaaa?"

I guess I have a weird double standard, because I'm totally okay with people online supporting my dress sense. I suppose it's because people who like say, grunge, actively look for grunge blog stylists online, and research and find people who dress as such. When you're dressed like the above and walk through a mall, it's like putting a wolf in a pen of sheep -- you sorta stand out, and no one's actively going through the crowd of people looking for people who dress like me to go, "oh my god, I love it!" In fact, your peers often give you a look like you have '666' written on your forehead in blood, or something. I get that a lot lately. (I think it's the hair.)

I know what you're thinking: "well, then, shut up, because people complimenting you in public is a good thing. GOD, KAT, APPRECIATE WHAT LITTLE YOU GET." Yeah, but, I GET STAGE FRIGHT OKAY. But I do appreciate the comments, after I calm down and the anxiety passes. Who doesn't love approval?

I told you I'm lame.

But aside from all of that, I reeeaaally love this outfit. Really. Really. Like...when it gets nice and warm in a few months (probably May...it starts getting nice in May) then I'll show ya guys what it looks like with the Stevies and lace skirt.

16 comments:

I feel weird getting compliments, too. Usually instead of saying thank you, I go on a rant about how weird I look or something and then I realize that I should just keep my mouth shut, but it's too late. I think a lot of people are just too scared of what people will think, so they are too afraid to express themselves through clothing. If I saw you randomly somewhere and I didn't know who you were I'd probably stop you and tell you how awesome you are. I can't wait to see this with the Stevie's! I fricking love that necklace and I am still not over your hair. You and Madeline are giving me major hair envy. Anyways, I hope you have a great week!

Haha, I get those rambly urges too! But my natural reaction is to just be so awkward, I can hardly speak. On the handful of occasions where people have stopped to compliment me, I've always felt my face go red, my heart leap into my throat like a moth, and stupidly stutter out a 'thank you' response. I almost go catatonic!

Dude, going off the colour and lightness of your hair, you could probably get away with a red, orange, or pink (maybe, no idea how vibrant that comes out) Kool Aid dye! Think about it, man! It'll only last between a month or two. :D ♥

can we be more alike? seriously. something like that happened to me two days ago. some guy came up to me and was like, 'nice creepers!' with an adorable smile on his face and i was in a blank stare.. it took me around four full on seconds to say 'pardon me?' and he was like, 'i said nice creepers miss!' and i was like, 'wow! thank you so much!!!' with this expression as if i'd just seen pigs flying. it was so strange.. i loved it though. i should've asked him for his number so we could hang out and get to know each other because for him to compliment my shoes who everyone else makes fun of says a lot. actually, the fact that he even knew that the style of the shoe was called 'creepers' just instilled me with awe. anyways, enough about me, I LOVE THIS. i love that necklace so much! 'culturally confused hooker' hahaha, beautiful.

I love this outfit!!! That dress is amazing! And it's okay I'm totally lame too! I don't get complements all that often I'm much much more familiar with the you have 666 on your forehead look, but whenever people complement my clothes I'm like really? I got this in a dumpster and then I cut it to pieces and am shocked when people think I would spend money on something like that lolz.

Okay yes, I'm commenting to my own post (weird, right) but only because I am a total doofus. My comments are moderated, and Áine commented not too long ago, but my stupid iPhone thought I hit the 'delete' link on the email I got for the comment, when my intention was to click 'publish.'

So I've learned my lesson -- never moderate unpublished comments from my phone -- and am copying her comment here, because I would never, ever respond to accidentally deleting a reader's comment with, 'eh, whatever.' I am so sorry, Áine!

"I actually think it's amazing that you dress just for yourself : I'd love to say that's 100% true of myself too, but honestly I really don't think it is, otherwise I'd be far more adventurous and come up with fantastic outfits (such as this one.)

Hah I can totally relate on reacting confused to compliments. I get comments on my hair all the time and I just sit there confused and wondering how they don't notice my roots or how faded my color is.