OP-ED: I'm Looking For A Sugar Daddy Who Will Pay Me in Dining Dollar$

Listen, I’ve spent all but $9.24 of my Dining Dollar$ for the semester at Pret A Manger — sue me! The sandwiches are so goddamn good. But that transaction of 1 swipe for $4.87 in DD... I ain’t having it!

Prospective sugar daddy, thats where you fit in. For the price of only one to two meals a day, YOU can receive all these benefits that come with my company: