Friday, October 22, 2010

Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows. They say as time passes, people grow older, smarter and wiser. True. The older I get, the smarter my Mom & Dad gets. I often wonder why parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. It was my mom who taught me to do whatever I wish to; whenever and wherever! And when I wish to write my mind at an unearthly hour like this; ( Its 2.42 AM now :P) My mom pops up out of nowhere – first asking me to go to bed and then ordering me to sleep. And I retort – when at an odd hour US military chose to blow up Nagasaki and when at an unearthly hour like 1.30 AM she chose to take birth and when at 2:53 AM she chose to give birth, why can’t I consider writing for my blog! She smiled, grabbing my lappy away from me and switching off my light she said “ Taking and giving birth weren’t my choices – if they were, I would have never considered giving birth to a little devil like you and by the way, ‘The Fat Man’ blew Nagasaki at 10pm and its wasn’t an unearthly hour considering the war time.” I smiled back at her – waiting for her to leave so that I can get back to ma lappy again ;). Many of you who read my blog regularly would know by this time that I write my mind. Anvitha is someone who loves being an open book. I predominantly meant that I love being transparent. And when I say I write my life in an open book, I think I should let my friends know what’s going on in my mind at mid of this night. Somethings’ hurting me. Am not feeling good. Sometimes we do things which we later feel we shouldn’t have ever done that! :( Duhh!! :-<

It was way back when I was 16 and my paternal (distant though) uncle and aunt decided on adopting a baby girl. After much hype and discussion on this issue in my family, they decided that I would accompany them to the orphanage for baby selection as I’ve always been their little angel and they always considered me as their god-child. On one fine chosen morning, we’ve set out to the orphanage and reaching there, I was excited at very glance of the tiny tots all around!! A lady clad in white sari with blue border, came out to ask what kind of girl we were looking for. And the choices were active, playful and beautiful. I was shocked to see that babies here are sold like any other ‘things’ in a general-store. Including the CHOICES:-o?!? And my uncle said “All the girls are like little goddesses. And am here to give family, home and life to an orphan and not to take home a pet. Give me any little girl who is healthy.” I was very happy to hear this and I proudly looked at him, letting people around feel he is MY uncle :>. The lady went in and came back with a baby girl. My aunt and uncle took the baby in their arms and I was disappointed because I couldn’t see the baby as people clouded. I could see my aunt and uncle very happy and their faces glew. I shouted out for my uncle indicating him I wanna see the baby. And as the baby was passed to me, I was shocked. It was a dark skinned girl. And at that age, the first thought that struck me was- the baby would grow up to be an ugly young girl!! I called out for my aunt and uncle and I told them that if they loved me any, they are not going for a black skinned girl. They tried explaining me that the baby is good and that a person’s colour doesn’t determine the person as good or bad. I was annoyed and I was pouting. I wanted a beautiful baby into my family. At that age, by beautiful I meant good looking. They gave up and after 2 weeks of completed legal formalities, we bought home a beautiful, fair skinned baby girl into my family. Time passed by and the baby is growing up to be beautiful girl, as expected.

Years later one day, when I decided to go to an orphanage on my birthday, the same old place from where we picked up our little angle struck me. I wanted to go all alone and so, I’ve been to the same place. The place didn’t change by any degree. As I got out of ma car, I stood under a tree looking around.

“Watch out lady!! There’s an army of red fire ants about to attack you and if you don’t move immediately, you must forget walking for a week!”

I jumped out of the place and ran from there with a horrified look. And I saw a little girl aged around 7 years who was laughing at me. I didn’t even care to thank her as she was laughing and I moved on. As I moved around the place, I could make out that this little girl is a good common friend of oldies and babies there. Someone told me she’s a gem at studies and she’s a bookmark to turn up to for all the cultural activities there. When I met the same old care taker, I was shocked to know ‘she’ was the baby I stopped my uncle adopting from. “Ah!! Afterall, I wasn’t wrong. My little angle looks lot better than this black skin” I thought, supporting myself, though now, am not against black skin and neither do I judge a person based on looks. I got to know later that she wasn’t adopted by any because she was dark. During lunch time I saw this girl again and she was helping organizers there in making up the dining table. Looking at the care-taker I said, “I think today, I wanna have lunch with kids and I would love to be seated beside this girl.” She nodded as if she knew what was in my heart.

One of the best meals I ever had was the lunch with 20 kids on my birthday. The girl sat beside me. An organizer was serving food and another was filling up glasses with drinking water. Suddenly a 9 year old chap screams to the organizer … “Aunty, You left my glass half empty”. And another kid says, “No brainless… she filled your glass half full!” and within minutes, that became a game! Few kids shouting the glass is half empty and few saying its half full. It was amazing how these kids made a joke out of everything and laughed. They enjoy the little things in life. And I observed that the girl beside me is laughing too. I asked her… “What did you think little girl – is the glass half full or half empty?” She raised her eyebrow and said “/:) The glass is twice as large as it needs to be :P” and I smiled back at her thinking, “Man!! This girl is different. She’s too witty for her age!”

After lunch we walked in the garden and unintentionally I asked her wether it hurts her to be an orphan. She said when she saw physically handicapped people and beggars on street; she always felt she’s way lucky! I was staring at her wondering how matured the little girl is! The day passed on well and before leaving, I gave a 500 rupee note to the girl. She asked if I had ten 50 rupee notes instead. When I asked her why, she said “That would be easier for us to share, isn’t it?”

I could do nothing but kiss her forehead. She is clever, she is beautiful! She has a spotless mind and a loving heart.

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comments:

Admirer..
said...

the experience i went thru, when i read this post, is like something i can never explain to anyone...lovely and heartouching article...after reading this, only thing i can do is standup and salute to those couple( anvi's uncle and aunt) and kneel-down and pray for those orphans..

It has always been my dream to adopt a baby. But after reading dis post now I feel just adopting a baby is not enough. Many Indians dont adopt a black skinned baby and in the society we live, it takes a good heart to adopt a child with dark-skin. I think I will adopt a dark skinned baby for sure.

I agree with Suguna. Many childless couple adopt babies. But it takes a good heart to adopt an unhealthy or not so cute looking baby. You need not feel bad for anything anvitha, you were 16 then and its quite a human to stop your uncle and aunt from getting a dark skinned girl into your family. I agree, few things haunt us after we realise them, but you still have better things to do :)

Keeping aside how the baby looks; The child beng active and mentally grown owes to the situations she grew up. The same baby if brought up in your family, may not be as witty and smart as she is now. That's because her life style and her situations demanded her to be witty. That was an inevitable situation there. So, you need not feel bad or low about anything, Anvitha :)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ;)) dont think y i used lines in the comments ;)) no words to explain :-P In one word .. Simply Superb ..

Anvitha is a legend :-o She learn bemba for me friends. I cry now. sory for bad english :( but I will tell in bemba . Anvitha isthemeni inchori kawauni ithera anopiya vinul ithemi inthona >:D< you made me cry of happy anvitha. I come to india surely for u one day :D Indians great heart ^:)^ I love Indians I love anvitha :x

Hey Anvitha, how have you been? Nice article again. So, you learnt Bemba for our Ademola? How I wish I were born a guy Anvi. I would have done everything under the sky to gain your love.. lol. You are a true beautiful mind!! >:D<

Am doing great. I thought you were away... So you replied me.....Yaayyy \m/.... yeah am from US too... from Det though... not oklahama. I know that you are in Hyderbhad, a place from South of India. Claudia told me.

A good post. I've heard that in India, there are many orphans waiting to be adopted and the orphan rate is growing each day. People there abondon babies, especially girls because they cannot take care of it. If couple like Anvi's uncle and aunt are there, they must be duely respected for giving life to a baby. Thats very divine. I also loved your "Inside a woman's heart" post anvitha :) Every point and each line in that is 100% true.

A good post Anvitha. I agree with you when you say at the age of 16, you felt u dont want a black skin in your family. Am 34 and am adopted when I was 7. Am born in India and after adoption, I had come to Australia. I love my parents and I thank them for giving me a beautiful life. But when I think of my friends who are dark skinned, now I want to know whether they were ever adopted or not.

A touching and emotional article, It would have been great if you had given the name of that orphanage, Maybe some of your readers would have given a helping hand...as those smart kids really need some attention ............Shri

Let Anvitha Know What You Feel About this..:)

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ABOUT ANVITHA

Too Vague to start somewhere and too much to end somewhere!!There are people who feel and say am tender and sensitive and there are people who say I’ve attitude. But I say am just a girl next door.. No more and no less! Someone who has mixed emotions.. I can be way too generous and at the same time throw loads of attitude around for you to handle! Lol.. This isn’t a warning or disclaimer for my readers, but this is just me!! You take back what you give!! I love teddy bears, chocolates, flowers and music.. My room’s pink!!You might have known by now that am a typical girl who’s still stuck somewhere in the era where I dream of my prince charming coming for me on a white horse!! Yes, he would! Wishes, hopes, expectations and dreams are few things that give us a reason to move on; Don’t they?!? Not a happy go lucky girl who haven’t yet faced cruelty of life.. I have been through thick and thin and I know what life is! Thank you people for spending two minutes of your precious life to know about me!! By the way, that would take just 2 more minutes to roam around my blog and go through my posts!! :)