All things Perpetually Thoughtful

Tag Archives: empathy

As far as I can recall, none of the adults in my life ever once remembered to say, ‘Some people have thick skin and you don’t. Your heart is really open and that is going to cause you pain, but that is an appropriate response to this world. The cost is high, but the blessing of being compassionate is beyond your wildest dreams. However, you’re not going to feel that a lot in seventh grade. Just hang on.’

This video really spoke to me. I felt like I was listening to a more forthcoming and empathetic version of my inner dialogue. Different things are difficult for different people and that is something we should be accepting and supportive of. Recognizing these patterns in ourselves and forgiving ourselves for not finding something easy allows us to focus on getting better at facing those challenges, and celebrating our progress instead of beating ourselves up for not being perfect. Being empathetic to others’ challenges helps them reach the same conclusions and can give them strength to embark on those same journeys.

I was just thinking about tv shows with groups of main characters, like Lost, and Big Bang theory. Or even casts with two main characters like Life with Derek, or a romantic pair like 18 to life (um can you guess what I just watched?) Even in these cases I feel as if there is a main main character, and I think other people feel the same way. I mean for me, Jack – Lost, Leonard – BBT, Casey – Life with Derek, Tom – 18 to Life. All these choices seem very obvious to me on the surface, but recently I realized that my opinions aren’t necessarily shared. In fact, chances are lots of people feel like Locke or the Island itself is the main character of Lost, and that Sheldon is the main character of BBT, and Derek is the main character in Life with Derek, and Jessie is more interesting then Tom in 18 to Life. When a lot of emphasis and screen time is given to several central characters I think we choose the one we relate the most with as the main character. Or the one we find the cutest. You know. Someone you feel you’re like, you’d like to be like, or you’d like to be with (in either a friendship or romantic sense.) I think the fictitious relationships you build between yourself and the characters, and the empathy you have for them is a big factor in what makes a show interesting. Which is why shows with moderate to large casts, like Lost and BBT and Heroes and Friends and even How I Met Your Mother (Even though I may argue that NPH is the driving factor of success here) are so popular. There are more characters that you may relate to or want to be like or want to be with. That keeps you watching.

P.S. Perhaps reading Malcolm Gladwell again leads me to analyze stuff. I just read the chapter of the Tipping Point on Sesame Street and Blues Clues, or “The Stickiness Factor.”

Seeing this sort of thing adds to my faith in humanity. We get so many reminders of the bad things that happen, it’s nice to see people working to change them. Especially in the case of men fighting for woman’s rights.