On The Things That Come Out Of My Kids’ Mouths

Most moms say this, and I guess that would be because it’s true. My kids are funny. The things they say and do? Hilarious. Worth writing down. Worth remembering, so I can retell them one day, when they’re all grown up.

[A week or so ago.]

The Kid. Age 8:

Him: Mom, did you know that the word “octopus” has a bad word in it?Me: Oh, really.Him: Yes. Octo-piss. Piss is a bad word, isn’t it?Me: Yes, the worst! (thinking about all the times I’ve said the P-word in traffic)

[Last weekend]

Toffee. Age 2 years, 11 months.

Toffee has a bedtime ritual. Sleep delay tactics. Once he’s in bed, he must call me 3/4 times to his room for something, before he can fall asleep. Usually it’s milk, or a cuddle. Sometimes another blanket, sometimes a kiss. This time? “Here mom, take this booger.”