Aug 18, 2008 5:35 PM

I want to start running with my wife. She is a complete beginner and not quite as enthusiastic as I am. Anyone got any advise on how to get her pumped up without scaring her away from running and causing a divorce?

Run w/ her and stick w/ her the entire run. I know it may seem hard for you, but you can always go run more later. By running at her pace and walking with her with her when she needs lets her know that you're there for her. It'll help keep her motivated so you can eventually keep up with her! This will help build her up gradually and let her know that she doesn't have to kill herself in order to run with you.:D

If there's a good local running club in your area, might be a good idea for her (or both of you) to join it. That way you can share your enthusiasm for running, but she can proceed at her own pace and benefit from the support. Or perhaps do some training together at a local high school track, so you can each go at your own pace without pressuring the other.

Absolutely agree, stick with her. My husband has been running for years 5-6 miles a day. I started running with him a couple of months ago. He obviously has a faster pace than I. It was very discouraging when he took off and ran ahead of me leaving me in the dust.. Of course, I shared my feelings with him. When we run together, we stay together. There is no substitute for the support and motivation I feel during those runs with my partner.

I just want to congratulate you on wanting to run with your wife. That to me says alot right there. I think my running would be way more fun if i had my husband to run with. But that said, I would just be her encourager. Like said before, run at her pace and if doesn't have one help her find it. If you are the one that has been running for a while teach her what you know. Make it fun and It'll be great. Oh by the way, if any one has any way to get my rugby playing husbad out with me, share away. Good Luck, Carri

Not knowing what your running schedule is this is a risk, but here is a suggestion.

She may enjoy a routine that has her going out with you around three times a week. Run with her the whole way during these days. This will still have you out and she will feel feel your sincere support on this new lifestyle choice of hers. On the other days you can still get your training in at your pace to meet your goals.

Help her be consistent and help her set some goals. Pick a 1 mile or 5K race in the future to target. She needs to know that she is part of the running communities. Give her all the support to help her through this transition time. Help here get to a place where she can enjoy "Staying on Top of the Ball".

Hey! I run with my husband as well, and nothing is worse than when he keeps about a foot ahead of me. Since we are on a Marine Corps Base, I think he feels that if anyone were to see how slow we were going, others would think less of him. By keeping about a foot in front of me, he is showing everyone that he can in fact run faster than our speed.

With that said, when you run with your wife, don't worry about everything around you or what others may think. Sticking right by her side will make her feel at ease and not so pressured by the pace.

I agree with the other folks somewhat but I think the best thing is to ask her what she prefers. I love my husband to death and he wants to run with me all the time even when it's considerably slower than what he's capable. There are times however when I just prefer to run by myself.....its therapeutic and I can clear my mind more when I don't have to worry about him. I will say one perk was that he helped me to increase my speed by staying a little bit ahead of me and pacing me. I'd rather have him a bit ahead of me because it makes me work harder.

What's her inspiration for running? What makes her maybe not so enthusiastic? One thing that my husband and I now do is plan where we will do some 5ks....find some fun races down the line....examples....reindeer runs, st. paddy's day, etc. You can have a great weekend trip away to a new place while doing this little past time. Good luck to you guys!

Make the training ... her training. Not yours. I run marathons. My wife and daughter have decided to run/walk their first half marathon. Their time goal is 14 min/mile pace.

So I run in the mornings. In the evenings, we walk or run/walk however far she decides. It is her session, not mine.

On Saturdays, I get up early and run my daily 7 miles. Then she does her long session for the week, which is 7 miles. I carry the water, towel, monitor the watch for both her mile pace and her run length. I encourage her and support her. It is all about her.

Don't make it a competition. Put your ego aside. Be what she needs ... be her support system. You are in a great position to be there with her.

On Sundays I usually do my long run. 15+ miles. She rides a bike beside me ... carries the water and towel. She considers that her cross training. She helps me with my training ... I help her with hers. It is about helping each other reach our individual goals ... not about imposing our goals on each other.

The question is: does she want to run with you? When I got back from Iraq last time, I was glad to see that my wife had started running while I was gone. We ran together a few times and I thought she enjoyed it...you know, stayed at her pace, encouraged her, etc. She finally came out and told me that she preferred running by herself as she felt like she was slowing me down (Silly, actually, since at first I was so out of shap from the deployment that I struggled to keep up with her).

As long as your fitness goals are similar and she enjoys running with you, then go for it. My wife and I still do physical stuff together - hiking, cycling, swimming - but running is a no-no!

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