Public Humiliation (395 hits)

When the truth sets you free, how eager you are to set your
lover free!
But, what is true to you may not be your lovers idea of truth.

Would you put their belief on blast and try to announce that
what they believe in is keeping them chained to slavery, or
do you try to pray their chains away?

There is nothing more humiliating to your spouse than being
called out for doing wrong amongst the public. Even if your
message is not meant for your spouse but meant to help
your fellow neighbor; If you know your spouse is all about
the thing you are saying is wrong, they will take offense.

Once you have blatantly offended your mate, they will start
to see you as the enemy, a person who will try to tear down
their credibility.

Just like the times you hear someone complain about their
lover in public. Your wondering to yourself: "Aren't you the
one who chose this person? You two don't seem to have much
in common. Why don't you look in the mirror instead of point
the finger at your other half?" Public defamation of your mate's
character eventually makes both of you look bad and equally
complain worthy.

Save your disagreements for your family or lovers meeting time.
Set up a time to talk or write out your SWOT analysis of your
relationship.
S: Strengths
W: Weaknesses
O: Opportunities
T: Threats
Each week or every other week to once a month, communicate
your SWOT analysis. To avoid yelling, write out your thoughts.
Video tape your thoughts. Whatever form of communication that
helps you avoid arguing is the path to choose.

Many couples fight because they think their viewpoint is right
and the other persons is wrong. They want to feel validated
and they want to hear that they were right.

Spare your mate humiliation and the feeling of being wrong or
looked down upon. They may even feel like a sell out or traitor.
Work on yourself, pray about the issues, then focus on your
mates strengths.

But if you can't live with your mate if they continue doing what
you deem as wrong, then it is time to leave them alone.