~ Theatre, Feminism & Poetry.

Sunglasses and Sweater Vests

They are wearing sweater vests with matching bow-ties, sunglasses and upside down colanders on their heads.

A mysterious metal device sits between them on the table.

MEGAN 1: Why isn’t it working?

MEGAN 2: What happened to the directions?

MEGAN 1: You ate them.

MEGAN 2: Oh, right. I was hungry.

MEGAN 1: Are all the wires in the right places?

MEGAN 2: Looks like it.

MEGAN 1: What’s missing?

MEGAN 2: Did you remember to turn the oven off before we left?

MEGAN 1: What?

MEGAN 2: I was baking croissants this morning, and the recipe called for so much butter and the butter made the pan sizzle and there was black smoke, but you were still asleep and I didn’t want to wake you. So I wanted to make sure the oven was turned off before we left. (beat) Oh, wait. (beat) Yes, now I remember. I turned it off myself.

MEGAN 1: Glad that’s settled. (beat) How were the croissants?

MEGAN 2: Badly burned, but still somewhat edible. I’m not one for baking. I can follow a recipe, but have no inclination to improvise in the kitchen.

MEGAN 1: We need to improvise now.

MEGAN 2: Indeed.

MEGAN 1: But if you ate the burn croissants, why did you also eat the directions?

MEGAN 2: I have a high metabolism, I guess.

MEGAN 1: Apparently.

MEGAN 2: If we make this adjustment and then switch the flow of the current–

She fiddles.

MEGAN 1 takes the device away from her.

MEGAN 2 takes the device back.

They both work on the device at the same time.

MEGAN 1: This is going to take a while.

MEGAN 2: We could start over.

MEGAN 1: But we’ve come so far.

MEGAN 2: Sometimes you have to re-invent the wheel.

MEGAN 1: Back to the drawing board?

MEGAN 2 nods.

They both take out tiny hammers and start smashing the device.

Once it’s a pulverized mound, they use their fingers to take pinches of the mount and transfer them to their pants pockets.