Wow. With all the flak online about statues and tentacled covers, it’s refreshing to look back at the good old days of Marvel, when men were men and women were girls. Why, I remember back in Fantastic Four #12, when Ol’ Thunderbolt Ross enlisted the aide of our noble heroes to combat the mysterious Hulk. After the boys boast about how their powers will ensure the Hulk’s defeat, Sue chimes in:

Curse my inability to scan properly! Sue is saying “Looks as though I’ll just be along for the ride! I’m not sure how I can help!”

You might think this little scene is undone by an edifying climax, which sees Invisible Girl saving her helpless male companions from the jaws of doom. Not quite. In the end, Sue Storm does pluck a harmless stun ray out of the grip of a sinister communist sympathizer (you know he’s evil basically from the first panel, because he’s bald and scrawny), giving The Thing the chance to engage in that activity that he so loves to engage in, at a particular time.

She’s right, though: against the Hulk, she’s more or less useless. In fact, in most of the issues I’ve read, Sue’s contribution to the team is to run around invisibly, startling innocent bystanders. I’m wondering when exactly she’ll develop the kickass powers we know and love today.

the ceebeegeebee vault

Are you a ceebeegee?

Have you tried to explain to someone who has never read a comic book the difference between Earth-1 and Earth-2? Can you name more than three kinds of kyptonite? Do you get excited whenever the mainstream media covers a comic-related story? Do you have longboxes full of comics you occasionally flip through nostagically? If so, my friend, you are a ceebeegee. Welcome home.