Imagine not having to constantly step around the assault course of prams and buggies that inevitably clogs up every branch of Starbucks and Cafe Nero. Imagine spending half an hour somewhere that doesn't come with the inbuilt soundtrack of a dozen furious babies bawling for attention. Imagine not feeling that pang of sadness as you realise that the pushchair left at the door by a parent obliviously nattering with her pals still has a toddler in it. Best of all, imagine a cafe where the word "babyccino" is never spoken aloud, even as a joke. It sounds like heaven, doesn't it?

I'm not sure I see why this has caused so much outrage. It isn't the only cafe in Berlin, parents. You haven't been banned from coffee. Nobody's suggesting that the only way for you to get your fix is to tie your children to railings like dogs. If you really want a latte that much, go next door. Or two doors down. Or across the street. This is 2012. There isn't exactly a shortage of coffee shops. Just go somewhere else, where people will greet your buggy with open arms.

So full marks to you, Ralf Rüller. Ignore the haters. You're a pioneer. You're the champion of the childless. And I'd even be tempted to stop by for a drink next time I'm in Berlin – if it wasn't for all the smug, tedious, needlessly-reverent, jazz xylophone-playing, coffee-fetishising hipster dullards that have taken the place of the pushchairs, obviously.