So you’ve decided to take the plunge and sign yourself up for online dating. Have you considered eHarmony? After all, it’s been around for over sixteen years, making it one of the most established dating websites online!

For many people, that kind of online dating just isn’t enough. Sure, set your own filters to limit the profiles you’re shown. But relationships are obviously about more than just gender, location, and age. Relationships are complicated, and compatibility can be difficult to figure out from an online profile.

That’s why eHarmony opens with a somewhat-lengthy questionnaire. The dating site takes your answers and matches them against other users’ in an effort to find you the perfect match.

What Is the eHarmony Questionnaire Like?

Believe it or not, until recently the questionnaire was a mandatory part of signing up for eHarmony’s service.

You will be encouraged to fill out a brief screening questionnaire upon registering. Enter answers to basic questions about your age, gender, and height, and any stances on smoking, drinking, religion, and having children. Then, go into some basic short-answer questions about your passions, hobbies, and the good things in your life.

After this, fill in the same demographic preferences about the partner you are looking for. This forms the basis of eHarmony’s matching system — but it doesn’t end here!

A quick Compatibility Quiz is next. These questions range from rating one-word personality traits to more in-depth questions about how you see the world, handle problems, and your relationship values.

From start to finish, the quiz portion of signing up for eHarmony took me under ten minutes.

If that’s not enough detail for you, you can answer additional questions on your profile. There are over a thousand multiple-choice questions available, and it quickly becomes clear why they’re important.

Questions range from silly opinions on socks and sandals to hard-hitting questions about religious beliefs, racism, gun control, recreational drug use, sexuality, education, and vaccines. Currently, these multiple choice questions are only available on eHarmony’s website, and not on the app.

You can answer questions at random on your profile, or go to a match’s profile to answer the same questions as them. Then see how the two of you compare!

For reference, it took me about 15 minutes to fill out just over a hundred questions. Now this was without adding any additional detail to my responses — something you may want to do if there’s important context for your answer!

Why Should You Fill Out the eHarmony Questionnaire?

The in-depth questionnaire may initially seem overwhelming, but if you’re serious about finding a lasting relationship, it’s definitely a good idea. Take a few minutes to answer the questions that matter the most to you. Over time, this will help you to truly narrow down the profiles to find your most compatible matches.

1. The Algorithm Works

eHarmony has been in business for 16 years and they’ve had all the time in the world to perfect their algorithm. While the exact algorithm is (naturally) a secret, it draws from your demographic data, information about your likes and habits, and information about the actions you take on the site.

This information is then cross-referenced with the 16 years of data on the site and additional research on couples who met through the site.

Remember, eHarmony is expensive! You should be trying to get every penny you can out of its services. And that’s exactly what this questionnaire allows you to do.

Take some time to fill out a few questions. Then the people browsing your profile know that you’re willing to put some effort into online dating. This can easily lead to more messages, and better connections.

3. You Know Your Matches Are Serious

Thankfully, eHarmony lets you filter matches based on who has, and hasn’t, completed the questionnaire. As above, this allows you to only view potential matches who have put some effort into their profile on the site. Why waste your time matching with people who don’t really care?

This isn’t to say that ideal relationships require people to always agree with each other. But everyone has one or two key issues that they’d rather find out about before becoming invested in someone new. This questionnaire lets that happen without interrupting the flow of conversation.

5. You’ll Be More Comfortable With Offline Dates

There’s definitely something comforting about knowing that you and your match have been deemed compatible by an impartial computer algorithm. As long as none of the aforementioned red flags appear, you’ll likely be more comfortable with an in-person date after browsing some questionnaire answers.

This reassures you that the person you are meeting up with is someone you will probably like. It also gives you some great opportunities for conversation topics!

Many of the questionnaire responses are quite short, giving you the chance to ask your date why they think dogs go to heaven or believe Uggs are a good choice in footwear.

eHarmony Isn’t for Everyone

The numbers don’t lie: eHarmony’s system can work! But it’s definitely not the right dating site for everyone.

If you’re looking to save money, this site definitely isn’t your best option. eHarmony can cost upwards of forty dollars a month (although longer subscriptions can offer discounted rates). At this price, eHarmony might be out of your price range if you are just curious, rather than actively seeking a partner.

And that’s what eHarmony is: relationship-oriented. The majority of people using this site are looking for a lasting relationship or marriage. If that’s not what you’re looking for, you might want to try something else.

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Hilary

March 16, 2017 at 6:13 am

It hasn't been a great success. I have been on the site 14 months now and haven't had a single date. Of all the smiles I sent, not a single one was returned. Of the messages I sent, I received no replies. I did exchange a number of messages with one man but he lived outside my preferred distance as have many of my matches. Unfortunately, virtually all of my matches have been Christian though I wouldn't characterise myself as such. I signed up for two years. It has been a complete waste of money. I would never advise anyone who lives in the UK to try this site. Recently, I have been getting 'matches' that don't seem to be real, because when I try the link to have a look at their profile, I simply get 'Oopsies, try agsin later' and the photos seem to professional and the men too handsome to be true. It might be because I cancelled my direct debit from the beginning of next year. It was a complete waste of £150. And to top it off, if you pay in instalments, the system is set up so you can't use the cool-off period. Perhaps e-harmony are genuine, not rogues as I read somewhere online (too late to save myself the money), but they haven't done me any favours. Perhaps I am simply undatable........ it's certainly not good for the self esteem. It's more an online rejection service than an online dating service. Good luck if you decide to try it and my commiserations if you are another frustrated customer.

Hi Hillary - thanks for taking the time to share your experiences with EH. I'm so sorry that it's been such a frustrating experience for you – I agree about the price - I also had a lot of sticker shock when I saw what they were asking!

If I could sue that old dirt bag that convinced me to give it a try. Giving the questions the best thoughtful answers I could, I was matched with someone who 1 year into the relationship and pack up and move to her home, I'm told by my perfect match that she is bi-polar and no longer on her meds. It was almost like "I got him" after I moved in.

Don't waste your time. You're at the mercy of the other 1/2 being truthful in how they answer. My best and current relationship came organically. Just be patient and don't waste your money.

You mean the quiz that, if I answer the questions honestly, causes eharmony to tell me it can't possibly match me with anyone?

As far as I can tell, admitting to any combination of mental illness, same gender attraction or non-Semitic religious belief will result in Eharmony giving you an apology and a statement that some people just can't be matched.

Briallyn is an occupational therapist working with clients to integrate technology into their everyday lives to assist with physical and psychological conditions. After work? She's probably procrastinating on social media or troubleshooting her family's computer problems.