>> 3.11.2010

Something I have always been jealous of: the people who can freely admit they love their body for what it is. Every day I admire people who "rock it". Ever since I can remember, I've always been able to find some sort of flaw even in my most favorite outfits. While I think part of it comes from the crappy weather that winter brings, I think the other part comes from the over-achiever syndrome I suffer from. Instead of accepting things as is, I always want to try and make it better. Two years ago, I put myself on Weight Watchers and successfully went from a size 10 to a size 4. Today I am still a size 4, but I find myself trying to loose even more weight. I told myself that I would be happy if I could be fit, and the other day I ran 6 miles in under an hour- reasonably fit if you ask me. Yet again, still not good enough. I feel guilty after a day of not going to the gym. I feel guilty about wearing something that shows my back fat ::shutter::.

Now, I completely recognize how unhealthy this is for me, and am really convinced that I am going to try and do something to change it. I think I may just need something I never really had- patience.

I am not sure how well this will work, but I'm thinking about finding one thing that I can say I really admire about myself each day. And of course, it can't be the same thing every day. To start, I am going to say I am glad my legs are cellulite free. Of course I instinctively contradict myself and say well obviously, when you have thunder thighs the size of a third world country. But I have to stop that part too. So today, I am grateful that I am cellulite free. What are you grateful for?

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About Me

I run, I eat, I work, I sleep. I shop, I drink (especially good beer), I read, I cook. I'm trying to grow up as best I can but not too fast. I hear its a rough ride, but don't worry, I've got my helmet on.