Sunshine, Beavers And Say What? ... :) Shangy!
>Here are the details on our Yahoo ShangyFunList:
To Subscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
To UnSubscribe send a blank email to
ShangyFunList-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
Group home page:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ShangyFunList
Through no fault of my own we suddenly became an
adult club in the love and romance directory so
you will have to confirm that you are an adult
when you go here. I still have no idea how to change
this back as it sends me around in a circle when I try!
or Web Site:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/ShangyFunList.html
Group email address:
ShangyFunList@yahoogroups.com
or email me here:
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
================
*~* A REMINDER: PLEASE Send me sweet, interesting, funny,
inspiring, family type forwards ANY TIME here...
bcrsystems@earthlink.net
I Need them, Love them, Use them, and Share them! THANK YOU!!
================
"We are each of us angels with but one wing,
and can only fly by embracing each other"
-Luciano Decrescenzo
- CALLING ALL CARING ANGELS ~
_.---. _
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hjw `.(
*~* WE NEED CARING And SHARING Angels For 2011 *~*
>Do You Want To Be A Shangrala Angel?
If you'd like to help and be counted as a 2011
Shangrala Angel, please visit the site and click
on the donate button. A Secure PAYPAL page comes up.
Any amount is greatly appreciated and needed!
PLEASE Visit Shangrala to Help:
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/index.html
OR If you'd rather send us a donation,
Please MAIL it here:
Elrhea Bigham
502 S. Harrison
Van Wert, OH 45891
*~* THANK YOU! MAY GOD BLESS ALL OUR ANGELS MOST ABUNDANTLY!
================
>-->2 Hot off the 'Shangy' Press :)
Our latest hottie comes from our friend Johanna. It took 3 years
for this page to get another set of photos to live up to it, but
this made the grade. They are just that beautiful. See what you
think - Check them out here...
^^ @@@@@@@@@
^^ ^^ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
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~~~~ ~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~ ~~ &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~
~ ~~ ~ ~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ ~~ ~~ ~
~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~ ~ ~~~ ~ ~~~
~ ~~ ~ ~ ~~~~~~ ~~ ~~~ ~~ ~ ~~ ~~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~~~~~~ ~ ~~ ~
~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~
pjb
God's Paintings 2
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gpaints2.html
---
...Awesome indeed! Thank You Johanna!
-<>-
After editing over 400 pages to update them, I saw this one from
our friend Linda and couldn't help but take some more time to do
it as a new page for us. Let's face it, I love oranges. They
represent a positive attitude to me since here they mostly come
from Florida - the sunshine state. So, when I see an orange, I see
smiles, sun, fun, happiness and good health. Just look what our
friend Linda sent me and see why I couldn't resist doing it up...
. | .
\ | /
`. \ ' / .'
`. .-*""*-. .'
"*-._ /.*" "*.\ _.-*"
: ; ____
""""': .. ;
_.-*" \ `.__.' / "*-._
.' `-.__.-' `.
bug .' / . \ `.
/ | \
' | `
Festival Of Citrus!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/orangefest.html
---
...Such A delight! Thank You Linda!
=============================================================
>-->From the FunnyBone: Crayon Mystery
/^\
The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring /___\
books. [_____]
|_____|
Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss |=====|
Francis, I ain't got no crayons." | _ |
| / \ |
"Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have || ||
any crayons.' You don't have any crayons. We don't have || ||
any crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see || ||
what I'm getting at?" | \_/ |
jgs |_____|
"Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all them |=====|
crayons?" '-----'
================================================================
PUB |
Rats! _ |
Steps. .' `. |
+o ' | | |
/\_ .o |- | |
|\ `(< __; | | | .-
/~/ (*)L r===r|.__|.-' ejm/a:f
+------------ Bizarre Celebrity Hypochondriacs ------------+
Howard Hughes was so obsessed with health that he once
wrote out nine-step instructions to his housekeepers on
how to open a can of fruit. He used Kleenex tissues on
everything, and refused to touch doorknobs or let other
people use his bathroom. He even kept a urine collection,
purportedly for medical testing.
Charles Darwin was a life-long hypochondriac who kept
a daily diary for six years that featured a running
commentary on the state of his health.
Napoleon Bonaparte had a lifelong fear and hatred of
medicine. To combat his hypochondria, he took steaming
hot baths, and developed meticulous grooming habits. He
suffered a plethora of maladies, most of them the result
of stress, including: skin disorders, ulcers, dysuria,
and a nervous cough.
Alfred Lord Tennyson was beset by seizures, fits and
trances, which included seeing animals floating across
his field of vision. He was obsessed with going bald and
blind. Among the treatments he sought was a radical form
of water therapy called hydropathy, which included being
rolled naked into blankets and then plunged into water.
Essayist H.L. Mencken suffered an obsessive-compulsive
need to continually wash his hands. Among his real-or-
imagined maladies was a chronic sore throat, hives, low
blood press-ure, lumbago, sinus infections, ulcers, and
hemorrhoids.
==========================================================
>-->From ArcaMaxJokes:
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virus
>Capsized Sailboat
Did you hear about the lawyer on vacation whose sailboat capsized in
dangerous, shark-infested waters?
He surprised his traveling companions by volunteering to swim to the
far-off shore for help. As he swam, his companions were startled by the
appearance of two dorsal fins -- great white sharks, heading straight
toward the lawyer.
To their surprise, the sharks allowed the lawyer to take hold of their
fins, and escorted him safely to shore.
When the lawyer returned with help, his companions asked him how he had
managed such an incredible feat. The lawyer answered, "Professional
courtesy."
-<>-
>Final Requests
A woman in Brooklyn decided to prepare her Will and make her final
requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she
wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered all
over Bloomingdales.
"Why Bloomingdales?" asked the rabbi.
"Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week."
-<>-
>Investment Terminology for the New Millennium
STOCK: A magical piece of paper that is worth $37.50 until the moment
you buy it. It will then be worth $8.95.
BOND: What you had with your spouse until you pawned his/her golf clubs
to invest in Amazon.com.
BROKER: The person you trust to help you make major financial
decisions. Please note the first five letters of this word spell "Broke."
BEAR: What your trade account and wallet will be when you take a flyer
on that hot stock tip your secretary gave you.
BULL: What your broker uses to explain why your mutual funds tanked
during the last quarter.
MARGIN: Where you scribble the latest quotes when you're supposed to be
listening to your manager's presentation.
SHORT POSITION: A type of trade where, in theory, a person sells stocks
he doesn't actually own. Since this also only ever works in theory, a
short position is what a person usually ends up being in. (i.e. "The
rent, sir? Ha. Ha. Ha. Well, I'm a little short this month.")
COMMISSION: The only reliable way to wake money on the stock market,
which is why your broker charges you one.
YAK: What you do into a pail when you discover your stocks have plunged
and your broker is making a margin call.
-<>-
>Exercise Pointers
The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear
heavy breathing again...
- It is well documented that for every mminute that you exercise, you
add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend
an additional 5 months in a nursing home at 50,000 per month.
- I joined a health club last year, spennt about 40,000 bucks. Haven't
lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
- I have to exercise early in the morninng before my brain figures out
what I'm doing.
- I like long walks, especially when theey are taken by people who annoy
me.
- I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
- The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.
- If you are going to try cross-country running, start with a small
country.
-<>-
>Overweight
Patient: It isn't possible that I'm as overweight as you say I am.
Doctor: Maybe you would prefer to look at it in a different way.
According to this chart, you're about 10 inches too short.
-<>-
>Juror's Excuse
Judge: "Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this
case?"
Juror: "I don't want to be away from my job for that long."
Judge: "Can't they do without you at work?"
Juror: "Yes, but I don't want them to know that."
================================================================
>-->From Our Friend Jo Ann :)
n__n_
/ = =\
/ ._Y_)
___________/ "\________________________________
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"--..___,--"
>Beavers
"The anal glands of a beaver are a common ingredient in perfume and
cologne but are also sometimes used to — believe it or not — enhance
the flavor of raspberry and vanilla candies, ice cream, drinks, and
desserts such as puddings. This ingredient can be in your food listed
as castoreum, or without your knowledge, listed as “natural flavor.”
The term “Natural Flavor” sounds innocent enough, but is sometimes used
as an umbrella term for some pretty nasty stuff the food companies
don’t want you to know about.
The exact definition of natural flavors from the Code of Federal
regulations is as follows:
“The term natural flavor or natural flavoring means the essential oil,
oleoresin, essence or extractive, protein hydrolysate, distillate, or
any product of roasting, heating or enzymolysis, which contains the
flavoring constituents derived from a spice, fruit or fruit juice,
vegetable or vegetable juice, edible yeast, herb, bark, bud, root, leaf
or similar plant material, meat, seafood, poultry, eggs, dairy
products, or fermentation products thereof, whose significant function
in food is flavoring rather than nutritional.”
My suggestion: Don’t use cosmetics that are made using animal
products, read the ingredients on food packages, call customer support
when you see those scary words, ‘natural flavors’, and guess what?
You’ll never have to eat anyone’s anal fluid again."
---
...Thanks - I think - Jo Ann!
,_
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I just looked it up because it sounds too stupid to be true -
But Guess what? It is true!
http://tinyurl.com/3vrlxyn
Beaver Anal Gland - Castoreum
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castoreum
If that isn't horrifying enough, here is more bad food news!
http://tinyurl.com/qcmuoe
.::\)`:`,
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Oh By The Way - CONGRATULATIONS JO ANN on your NEW MARRIAGE!!
I just found out via MYB - I've been too busy to visit it much
lately so I hope these congrats are not too terribly late!
May God Bless The Two Of You!
I hope you didn't have vanilla ice cream with your cake! ;)
Here's a good LOVE poem for you two ....
=============================================================
>-->From Our Friend Linda :)
[LOVE Poem dedicated to Jo Ann and Her new Husband]
)
(
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OOOY dOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO \
dOOY dOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOb
OOO dOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOO YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
YOOb OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY
YOObdOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOxXY
"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOxXY"
"YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAoS"
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOxXXXY
"YOOOOOOOOOxXXXY"
AoS "YOOOXXXXY"
""Y""
>Ever since I laid eyes on you...
I'm falling for you
And I pray you're falling too
I've been falling
Ever since I laid eyes on you.
I loose my step
I loose my ground
I loose my self
When you're around.
I'm falling in love deeply
And I hope you're also falling for me
And I'll fall forever
Until we're together.
My heart skips a beat
My mouth gets dry
Every single time
You walk by.
I've been hit by Cupid's arrow
And I'll never let it go
Until you've been hit too
Because I'm falling for you.
Can't you see that I'm falling for you
And I pray you're falling too
I've been falling
Ever since I laid eyes on you...
---
...Awww, such a sweet poem! Thank You Linda!
-<>-
Oh my! You're making me blush on email...
o
o
//@@ o
@@ vv)
@@@ V @ _____
/ \ / \ |\____\
| ( X ) | | | |
| | ( | | | |
\======\ \|_"_|
(____
> Ultimate Love Letter…
(By a Programmer...)
Sweetheart,
I`ve seen you yesterday while surfing on the local train platform and
realized that you are the only site I was browsing for. For a long time
I`ve been lonely; this has been the bug in my life and you can be a
real debugger for me now.
My life is an uncompiled program without you, which never produces an
executable code and hence is useless.
You are not only beautiful by face but all your ActiveX controls are
attractive as well.
Your smile is so delightful; it encourages me and gives me power equal
to thousands of mainframes processing power.
When you looked at me last evening, I felt like all my program modules
are running smoothly and giving expected results. /*which I never
experienced before.*/
With this letter, I just want to convey to you that if we are linked
together, I'll provide you all objects & libraries necessary for a
human being to live an error free life.
Also don`t bother about the firewall which may be created by our
parents as I've strong hacking capabilities by which I`ll ultimately
break their security passwords and make them agree for our marriage.
I anticipate that nobody has already logged in to your database so that
my connect script won't fail.
And its all but certain that if this happened to me, my system will
crash beyond recovery.
Kindly interpret this letter properly and grant me all privileges of
your inbox. Error free...
Regards,
Software Programmer
Today This company
Tomorrow That Company
But always want ur company!
---
...Awww, Another sweet one! Right down my alley! Thanks Linda!
-<>-
_____
/ _)))
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| / \ |
|/ ____\!_______
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b'ger /,/ .. .
>Daughter in law's Revenge...
THIS MUST COUNT AS THE BEST MOTHER-IN-LAW JOKE!
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the Man's face was
severely burned.
The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his
body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of
her own skin.
However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable
would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that
they would tell no one about where the Skin came from and they
requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was
a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's
new face.
He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and
relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!
One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion
at her sacrifice.
He said, 'Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me.
How can I possibly repay you?'
'My darling' she replied,' I get all the thanks I need every time I see
your mother kiss you on the cheek.
-<>-
_
|\_,,____
( o__o \/
/(..) \
(_ )--( _)
/ ""--"" \
,===,=| |-,,,,-| |==,==
|d | WW | WW |
|s | | | | |
>The Pig And The Horse
There was a farmer who collected horses; he only needed one more breed
to complete his collection. One day, he found out that his neighbor
had the particular horse breed he needed. So, he constantly bothered
his neighbor until he sold it to him. A month later, the horse became
ill and he called the veterinarian, who said:
- Well, your horse has a virus. He must take this medicine for three
days. I'll come back on the 3rd day and if he's not better, we're
going to have to put him down.
Nearby, the pig listened closely to their conversation.
The next day, they gave him the medicine and left. The pig approached
the horse and said:
- Be strong, my friend. Get up or else tthey're going to put you to sleep!
On the second day, they gave him the medicine and left. The pig came
back and said:
- Come on buddy, get up or else you're ggoing to die! Come on, I'll
help you get up. Let's go! One, two, three...
On the third day, they came to give him the medicine and the vet said:
- Unfortunately, we're going to have to put him down tomorrow.
Otherwise, the virus might spread and infect the other horses.
After they left, the pig approached the horse and said:
- Listen pal, it's now or never! Get up,, come on! Have courage! Come
on! Get up! Get up! That's it, slowly! Great! Come on, one, two,
three... Good, good. Now faster, come on.... Fantastic! Run, run more!
Yes! Yay! Yes! You did it, you're a champion!!!
All of a sudden, the owner came back, saw the horse running in the
field and began shouting:
- It's a miracle! My horse is cured. Thiis deserves a party. Let's kill
the pig!
Points for reflection: this often happens in the workplace. Nobody
truly knows which employee actually deserves the merit of success, or
who's actually contributing the necessary support to make things happen.
LEARNING TO LIVE WITHOUT RECOGNITION IS A SKILL!
If anyone ever tells you that your work is unprofessional, remember:
amateurs built the Ark and professionals built the Titanic.
DON'T LOOK TO BECOME A PERSON OF SUCCESS, LOOK INSTEAD TO BECOME A
PERSON OF VALUE!
And when it’s our turn, remember to speak up for the pig!
---
...LOL! C'est La Vie - Eh? Thanks Linda!
================================================================
>-->From Our Friend Del :)
,'-',
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Adult Truths
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately
clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I
was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm
pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how
the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at
work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive
for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray?
I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it
asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report
that I swear I did not make any changes to.
[yeah and that you already sent to the boss or uploaded!]
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know
not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
[Smart freezers have them now! Shop for them!]
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday
or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom
and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just
nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they
said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars
team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong,
brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get
dirty, and you can wear them forever.
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and
still not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their
car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on
the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button
from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every
time.
24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in
1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100
years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
Ladies.....Quit Laughing.
Heal the past, live the present, dream the future.
Enjoy life!
---
...HaHa! Thanks Del!
#25. With emails, most times when something sounds too stupid to
be true so then you don't send it to your friends, but you find out
later it is true. Likewise when somethings sounds like it just might
be true and you should tell others about it to safeguard them so then
you send it to all your friends, but you find out later it was all
just big fat lie.
==================================================================
>-->From Our Friend Johanna :)
:
'. _ .'
-= (~) =-
.' # '.
/"""""
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/ \ :\\
/ | :|\
|___| :|/\
| | :|\ \
\ \ :| \ \_
\ \==L| \\\
///` ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
[___]]
jgs (____))
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>Conservatives vs Liberals
I have often wondered why the conservatives are called the rightť
and the liberals are called the â€śleft. By chance, I stumbled
upon this verse in the Bible:
, ,
/////|
///// |
///// |
|~~~| | |
|===| |/|
| B |/| |
| I | | |
| B | | |
| L | /
| E | /
|===|/
jgs '---'
Ecclesiastes 10:2 (NIV)
The heart of the wise inclines to the right, but the heart of the fool
to the left .ť
Hmmm, I guess that sums it up pretty well... YOU CAN'T HAVE A BETTER
REFERENCE SOURCE THAN TEXT STRAIGHT FROM THE BIBLE!
---
...LOL! Aw, yes, look it up dear! TeeHee! Thank You Johanna!
Like my teacher in the Word always would say -
"Hey, Don't get mad at me! I didn't write the book!"
================================================================
>-->In The Worldly News:
[POLITICS]
>From ConservaticeOutpost:
The strength of the so-called Tea Party groups has been that they are
entirely the expression of the American people. They are a direct
result of the danger that the country is in. It is a popular movement,
driven by the will of a people who have been pushed to their limits by
an oppressive regime dedicated to an alien way of life which imposes
their doctrine of tyranny over every aspect of our lives.
The Patriot Movement has emerged as the heart of the Republican
Party, with 60% of Republicans stating that they are Conservative. A
not surprising additional 20% of Independents identify themselves as
Tea Party members… bad news for the De Marxists who virtually had
the independent vote to themselves in the 2008 election cycle. ...
READ MORE>>>
-<>-
Members of Congress are currently debating whether or not to allow
our country to legally go deeper in debt - and they need to hear from
you.
Soon the federal government will reach its current legal debt limit
of 14.3 trillion dollars, and the only way it can stay open is if
Congress raises that limit.
Currently, many conservative members of Congress, such as Senators
Jim DeMint, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul and Mike Lee, are demanding that
Congress approve a Balanced Budget Amendment to the Constitution
before any extension of the debt limit.
They need our support!
Click here and demand that Congress pass a Balanced Budget Amendment
to the Constitution today!
-<>-
>Live in the Now - Brought to you by Stop Aging Now
Weekly eNewsletter - June 21, 2011 Edition
NOTE FROM THE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
Should We Label GMO Foods?
A hundred years ago, pretty much all of the food Americans ate was
essentially organic and local --- and not surprisingly, much more
nutritious. But with the advent of Big Agra and industrialized food
production, we moved towards a food supply heavily modified for higher
yields and higher profits. First came pesticides, which U.S. farmers
began using just after World War II. Then came genetically modified
organisms, or GMOs. The first genetically modified food crop was
introduced in 1994, and since then, the introduction of new GMO crops
has accelerated at an alarming rate.
Throughout these changes, very little consideration has been given to
food labeling, and by and large, consumers have had no idea to what
extent the food they buy is contaminated with pesticides or genetically
modified.
Click/paste the link below to continue reading:
http://www.stopagingnow.com/liveinthenow/article/should-we-label-gmo-foods
-<>-
>From BizarreNews:
In Bizarre News I have reported on a story about a man who
set his home on fire while trying to burn out a hornet's
nest. Then there was the man who burned his house down while
trying to destroy a squirrel nest. But this story is a new
one to me.
Officials say a Florida man set fire to his home while trying
to clean an infection on his foot.
How? The man told deputies he was sitting on his bed, using
rubbing alcohol to clean his foot. Of course, the best way
to calm the nerves that come with an infected foot is to have
a smoke.
His lit cigarette came into contact with the flammable liquid
and set his sheets on fire. He removed the bedding and ran to
get a fire extinguisher, but the flames grew out of control
while he was gone.
Investigators have accepted the man's story and ruled the fire
accidental. I however have my doubts. I watched an episode of
Myth Busters where they proved that he heat of a lit cigarette
is not enough to ignite liquid gasoline, which is much more
inflammable than alcohol.
So I conducted my own experiment, and no matter how hard I
tried I could not get rubbing alcohol to ignite with a
cigarette. So the obvious solution in my mind? Spontaneous
human foot combustion.
+-- Class honors man for denture escape --+
MEMPHIS - A 92-year-old Washington state man who used his
false teeth to chew through the duct tape with which he
was tied up received an award from a third grade class.
The class at Berclair Elementary in Memphis picked Lester
Matteson of Shoreline, Wash., to receive the 2011 hero
medal after he used his dentures to chew through the duct
tape thieves had used to tie him to a kitchen chair in
December, KOMO-TV, Seattle, reported Thursday. "Oh, I
think they're the heroes. They're the little heroes,"
Matteson said of the class. Matteson was suggested to the
class by 8-year-old Haley Dunwoody. "I think he's a hero,
'cause he used fake teeth to chew through tape when he got
robbed," the girl said.
+-- Robbers get doughnuts instead of cash --+
BARNSTABLE, Mass. - Police in Massachusetts said they
arrested a trio of men who robbed a Dunkin' Donuts of a
bag of pastries while armed with knives and a hatchet.
Barnstable police said the men, two of whom were carrying
knives while the third was armed with a hatchet, entered
the Dunkin' Donuts on West Main Street in Hyannis Wednesday
night and demanded an employee hand over a paper bag they
apparently believed to contain money, the Cape Cod Times
reported Monday. However, Sgt. Thomas Twomey said the bag,
which the men did not open before leaving, contained dough-
nuts. Police said they identified the men from security
camera footage of the incident. Nicholas Mercurio, 19,
Lukas Peterson, 21, and Charles Iliffe, 20, were arrested
and charged with armed robbery while masked.
+-- Elderly couple threaten to shoot neighbor --+
SCHLUSSER, Pa. - Police in Pennsylvania said a couple,
ages 83 and 89, are accused of threatening to kill a
neighbor after discovering cat droppings on their
property. Investigators said Harold Rought, 83, and his
wife, Ruth, 89, of North Middleton Township, called police
after discovering the cat feces on their property, The
Patriot-News, Harrisburg, Pa., reported Monday. The couple
told police they had been feeding stray cats in the
neighborhood and they believed their neighbor had placed
the droppings on their property in retaliation. The
Roughts told police they were planning to shoot the
neighbor. The couple were both arrested and charged with
terroristic threats and harassment.
+-- Sister cleared in thermostat fight --+
PLAINFIELD, Ill. - A 62-year-old Illinois woman who fought
with her sister over a 1-degree difference in the setting
of their home's thermostat has been acquitted by a judge.
Ilona Sales of Plainfield was cleared Monday by Will County
Judge Brian Barrett, who said it was unclear whether Sales
or her sister, Wanda Lupina, started the December fight,
the Chicago Tribune reported Wednesday. "Both of them seem-
ed ready to settle the issue in front of the thermostat,"
he said. "I hope this is the last blowup." Both sisters
agreed the fight was sparked by their feud over the thermo-
stat in their home -- Sales wanted the temperature to be
68, while Lupina preferred 67. Lupina claimed Sales shoved
her away from the thermostat twice and punched her in the
face, causing a black eye. However, Sales claims Lupina
started the fight by pushing her away from the thermostat.
Steven Haney, Sales' lawyer, said his client still lives
with her sister and the women have come to an agreement
about the thermostat.
---
...So that commercial where he is beating himself up over
2 degrees is based on fact? Who would've guess someone
would fight themselves or anyone over a degree or two!
==========================================================
>-->From CleanLaffs:
..,;;;;,.
.:((()()())):.
:(()"'"'""'()):
.:()"."():.
:())) ._. ((():
(())\ -=- /(()) ___________
.'(()) - (())('. | |
/ ))\ /(( \ | Turn Left|
______/ /( \_/ ) \ \______/ NOW!! |
________( : )_________| okay? |
\____._._____/ |__________|
)===[]===(
/ \
Tim Campbell
My wife cannot ride in a car without telling whoever is
driving what to do, when to do it, etc. She is, bar none,
the worst back seat driver in the world. I have long
thought this, though she would deny it. She claimed she
seldom, if ever made comments about my driving. I, of
course, claimed the opposite. Now I have proof.
The other day we were headed for the mall and my daughter
piped up, "Daddy, before you married Mommy, who told you
how to drive?"
-<>-
On vacation, a man and his wife check into a hotel. The
husband wants to have a snack at the restaurant, but his
wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to
their room to rest.
She lies down on the bed... just then, a train passes by
very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's
thrown out of the bed.
Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down
once more. But just a few minutes later a train again
shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.
Exasperated, she calls the front desk and asks for the
manager who says he'll be right up.
The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story
is true.
"Look... lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to
the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife.
Just then the husband walks in. He takes one look at the
manager lying in bed with his wife and yells, "Hey! What
are you doing in here!?"
The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting
for a train?"
-<>-
_
/_/_ .'''.
=O(_)))) ...' `.
jgs \_\ `. .'''
`..'
My husband was telling me about a news item he heard on
National Public Radio about how the U.S. military is en-
listing honeybees to find land mines. The insects are
trained to react to the scent of TNT, then are fitted
with transmitters and sent out to search for underground
explosives. "When they smell TNT," my husband explained,
"the insects hover over the area and the military tracks
them to the site to safely eliminate the land mine."
`>.___ o-.--.-o ___,-
I don't think I'll ever have a mother's intuition. My sister
left me alone in a restaurant with my 10-month old nephew.
I said, "What do I do if he cries?"
She said, "Give him some vegetables."
It turns out that jalapeno is not his favorite.
-<>-
Fellow employees at the international company where I work
know I'm a notary public and have me certify personal
documents.
One day, two Swedish men asked me to witness signatures on
an automobile title. "I'm selling my car to this man," one
of them explained. "We came here because we heard you were
notorious."
-<>-
The new bride had spent two hours preparing her first break-
fast. She sat down at the table, eagerly watching as her
husband slowly savored each forkful.
"How was it, Honey?" she asked when he'd finished.
"Well," he began thoughtfully, wiping his lips, "you probably
could have beaten the eggshells a little longer. But on the
whole, it was a good start."
-<>-
A crew of highway maintenance workers were sent to repair
some road signs that vandals had knocked down in a forested
area. The first one they put back up was a symbol warning
of a deer crossing.
As they moved down the road to repair the next sign, one
member, of the crew looked back and spotted a deer running
across the highway. She turned to a co-worker and said, "I
wonder how long he's been waiting to cross?"
===========================================================
_,--''--,_ _,-'~~'-,
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-- '' -'-' ~` "" ~` ~`' ~` '"' "' -- '' -'-'
miK
>-->Things You'll Never Hear In A Western Movie:
"I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist.
IN A DIRTY MUG!"
"Gentlemen, rather than get caught up in mindless reaction,
let's draw upon our feminine selves for a more intuitive
solution."
"Can we postpone this duel till 12:05? I gotta use the little
boys room."
"Injuns! Quick, pull the wagons into an irregular dodecagon!"
"Y'know, Badlands Pete... a roaring campfire, good coffee,
nice prairie breeze, just you 'n' me... what say we put on
the rhinestone gowns and dance a jig or two?"
"Let's see... hardtack and pemmican... that's three grams of
fat, seven grams of protein, and two starches."
"You 'n' Slim round up them strays, and I'll tell Cookie to
get started on the gazpacho and the fondue."
"That's him! That's the yella-bellied varmint who shot my
therapist!"
"He was a strong man, a good marshal, and I reckon he had a
keen eye for interior decoration."
"Hey, Buck, do these chaps make my butt look big?"
"It's like I keep tellin' ya, Earl: men is from Tombstone,
women is from Dodge."
"HANG HIM HIGH, BOYS!! ...Okay, now a little to the left...
Oooh! Stop right there. Perfect!"
===============================================================
>-->From The Jokester:
_____
_____________________ | ,-. |
| | |((#))|
| ejm | |_`-'_|
| \ |
| )\ |
| `\ |
| (\ |
| \\ |
| \\ |
| \\ |
| \\ |
| \\ |
| \\ |
|___________________\\|
\\
\,
>Some Helpful Rules for Better Writing:
Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat)
Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
Be more or less specific.
Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
No sentence fragments.
Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly
superfluous.
One should NEVER generalize.
Don't use no double negatives.
One-word sentences? Eliminate.
Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
The passive voice is to be ignored.
Never use a big word when a diminutive one would suffice.
Use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations.
Tell me what you know."
If you've heard it once, you've heard it a thousand times: Resist
hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it correctly.
-<>-
| | | | | | |
| | | | | | |
| | | |===| )---(
|_|_| |___| |___|
\ / ).( [_]
\-/ \|/ U
hjm ' '
>The English Language!
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is "boxes",
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not "oxes".
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say "methren".
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England.
We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play and
play at a recital?
We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
We have noses that run and feet that smell.
We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns
down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out,
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?
| \ \ | |/ /
| |\ `' ' /
| ;'aorta \ / , pulmonary
| ; _, | / / , arteries
superior | | ( `-.;_,-' '-' ,
vena cava | `, `-._ _,-'_
|,-`. `.) ,-->From AndyChaps:
** A Thought for the Day
, ,
/////|
///// |
///// |
|~~~| | |
|===| |/|
| B |/| |
| I | | |
| B | | |
| L | /
| E | /
|===|/
jgs '---'
Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moments, worship God.
Painful moments, trust God.
Every moment, thank God.
**Never stop praying. Whatever happens,
keep thanking God because of Jesus Christ.
This is what God wants you to do.
Contemporary English Version~~~ I Thessalonians 5:17-18
** Prayer
Lord, help me in all moments of life to turn to you. Amen.
-<>-
>**Andy Says... Just Think About This!**
** "Wisdom has two parts: 1- Having a lot to say 2- Not saying it."
** A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
** All of us could take a lesson from the weather:
It pays no attention to criticism.
** Kindness is so sweet, when life is bitter.
** The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be
ruined by praise than saved by criticism.
~~~Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993) Minister and motivator
** Criticism should always leave people with the feeling that
they have been helped.
* Sound becomes music if a trained man uses it. Training is
essential.
** Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will
mind it. “ ~~-- Henry David Thoreau
**"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their
names." ~~-- John F. Kennedy
** "Never play leapfrog with a unicorn." ~~--- Anonymous
-<>-
O
(_)
_ )_( _
/`_) H (_`\
.' ( { } ) '.
_/ /` '-'='-' `\ \_
[_.' _,...,_ '._]
| .:"`````":. |
|__//_________\\__|
| .-----------. |
| | .-"""-. | |
| | / / \ | |
| ||- < -|| |
| | \ \ / | |
| |[`'-...-'`]| |
| | ;-.___.-; | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | _|||_ | | |
| | | >===< | | |
| | | |___| | | |
| | | ||| | | |
| | | ;-; | | |
| | | ( ) | | |
| | | '-' | | |
| | '-------' | |
jgs _| '-----------' |_
[= === === ==== == =]
[__--__--___--__--__]
/__-___-___-___-___-__\
`"""""""""""""""""""""""`
** [PG] The "Birth Announcement" **
There was an expectant father who had spent quite some time
waiting for the offspring to arrive - at his in-laws' place.
As his leave balance had gone into the red, he tells his
father-in-law, "When my son comes, do not call up my office
and say that I have become a father of a boy because I'll
have to shell out a lot for parties.
Just leave me a message that the clock has arrived. This
will be our code for the arrival of the baby."
The offspring does finally arrive one day, but it's a daughter.
The father-in-law now thinks to himself, "If I tell him that
the clock has not arrived, he'll misunderstand and think
that something has happened to the baby and come
rushing over."
So the father-in-law left the following message: "The clock
has arrived, but the pendulum is missing."
-<>-
,
/.\
//_`\
_.-`| \ ``._
.-''`-. _.'`.
.' / /'\/`.\ `.
/ . |/ `. \
' / \ ;
: ' \ : :
; ; ; / .
' : . ' /
\ \ / .'
LGB `.` .' .'
`-..___....----`
>**You Need A Computer** (Rather Long, But Very Good)
An unemployed man is desperate to support his family. His wife watches
TV all day and his three teenage kids have dropped out of high school
to hang around with the local toughs. He applies for a janitor's job
at a large firm and easily passes an aptitude test.
The human resources manager tells him, "You will be hired at minimum
wage of $5.15 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address so that we can
get you in the loop. Our system will automatically e-mail you all the
forms and advise you when to start and where to report on your first
day."
Taken back, the man protests that he is poor and has neither a computer
nor an e-mail address. To this the manager replies, "You must
understand that to a company like ours that means that you virtually do
not exist. Without an e-mail address you can hardly expect to be
employed by a high-tech firm. Good day."
Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having $10 in
his wallet, he walks past a farmers' market and sees a stand selling
25lb crates of beautiful red tomatoes. He buys a crate, carries it
to a busy corner and displays the tomatoes.
In less than 2 hours he sells all the tomatoes and makes 100% profit.
Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with
almost $100 and arrives home that night with several bags of groceries
for his family.
During the night he decides to repeat the tomato business the next
day. By the end of the week he is getting up early every day and
working into the night. He multiplies his profits quickly.
Early in the second week he acquires a cart to transport several boxes
of tomatoes at a time, but before a month is up he sells the cart to
buy a broken-down pickup truck.
At the end of a year he owns three old trucks. His two sons have left
their neighborhood gangs to help him with the tomato business, his wife
is buying the tomatoes, and his daughter is taking night courses at the
community college so she can keep books for him.
By the end of the second year he has a dozen very nice used trucks and
employs fifteen previously unemployed people, all selling tomatoes. He
continues to work hard.
Time passes and at the end of the fifth year he owns a fleet of nice
trucks and a warehouse which his wife supervises, plus two tomato farms
that the boys manage. The tomato company's payroll has put hundreds of
homeless and jobless people to work. His daughter reports that the
business grossed a million dollars.
Planning for the future, he decides to buy some life insurance.
Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an insurance plan to
fit his new circumstances. Then the adviser asks him for his e-mail
address in order to send the final documents electronically.
When the man replies that he doesn't have time to mess with a computer
and has no e-mail address, the insurance man is stunned, What, you
don't have e-mail? No computer? No Internet? Just think where you
would be today if you'd had all of that five years ago!"
"Ha!" snorts the man. "If I'd had e-mail five years ago I would be
sweeping floors at Microsoft and making $5.15 an hour."
~~~Posted Fro: Pastor Tim:
-<>-
_|_
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_|_
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|^^^^^^^^^^||+|
| # # # ||||
.... ....".
|||||||||||||||||
unknown
>**Safe...Safer...Safest... Your Call**
** Avoid riding in Automobiles. They are responsible for 20% of all
deaths.
** Do not stay at home! 17% of all accidents occur at home.
** Avoid walking on streets and sidewalks because 14% of all accidents
are suffered by pedestrians.
** Don't travel by air, rail, or water, because 16% of all accidents
occur on these forms of transportation.
** You will be pleased to learn that only .001% of all accidents occur
in worship services! And these are usually related to previously known
physical disorders.
** Therefore, logic tells us that the safest place in the world for
you to be at any time is at church!
** Bible study is safe too. The percentage of Accidents that occur
during Bible Study is nearly Zero!
** For Safety's Sake - Attend Church and read your Bible, it could
save your life!
** Oh, and another thing, Don't Drive faster that Your Guardian Angle
can fly!
-<>-
>**On Abortion**
On a 1990 Barbara Walters Special, actor Mel Gibson stated his
opposition to birth control, infidelity and abortion. "God is the
only One who knows how many children we should have, and we should be
ready to accept them. One can't decide for oneself who comes into
this world and who doesn't. That decision doesn't belong to us." In a
land full of scandals and month-long marriages, Mel has been married
to his wife Robyn for 19 years, and they recently welcomed their
seventh child into the world. [I think things have changed for him now]
-<>-
** THOUGHTS ABOUT LIFE** (Andy says... This is a piece that brings
back a lot of memories for me. How about you??)
** Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.
** Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
** Your never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to
have a fire in your back garden.
** Nobody ever dares make cup a soup in a bowl.
** Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.
** Rummaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a
bouncy ball.
** One of the most embarrassing things you can do as schoolchild
is to call your teacher mum or dad.
** Old women and women with mobile phones look wrong!
** Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee.
** Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
** There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when
you've got your hand or head stuck in something.
** The most painful household incident is wearing socks and
stepping on an upturned plug.
** You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin
piece of wood specifically to stir paint with.
** Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.
-<>-
_ _.-'`-._ _
;.'________'.;
_________n.[____________].n_________
|""_""_""_""||==||==||==||""_""_""_""]
|"""""""""""||..||..||..||"""""""""""|
|LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|
|.. .. .. ..||..||..||..||.. .. .. ..|
|LI LI LI LI||LI||LI||LI||LI LI LI LI|
,,;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;;,;;,;;;,;;;,;;,,
;;jgs;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
**Bizarre Presidential FACTS**
** Ronald Reagan, the 40th U.S. president, saved 77 people from
drowning as a lifeguard in his youth at a riverside beach near
Dixon, Illinois.
** 20th president of the United States James Garfield could write
Greek with one hand while writing Latin with the other.
** Abe Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States, carried
letters, bills, and notes in his notorious black, top-hat.
** First U.S. president George Washington rejected a movement
among army officers to make him king of the United States.
** William Taft, 27th president of the United States, weighed
more than 300 pounds and had a special oversized bathtub in-
stalled in the White House.
** The 38th president of the United States, Gerald Ford turned
down offers to play professional football for the Green Bay
Packers and the Detroit Lions.
-<>-
**Taking The Blame**
An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of
their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that
the next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary.
"Let's have a party, Homer," she suggested. "Let's kill a
pig." The farmer scratched his grizzled head. "Gee, Ethel,"
he finally answered, "I don't see why the pig should take
the blame for something that happened fifty years ago."
-<>-
**The Tesas Rancher in Australia**
A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he
meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows
off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have
wheat fields that are at least twice as large".
Then they walk around the ranch a little and the Aussie
shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says,
" We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as
your cows".
The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the
Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.
He asks, "And what are those"?
The Aussie asks with an incredulous look, "Don't you have
any grasshoppers in Texas"?
-<>-
'\
' \ O
' \@ |
' `\/|
' __| * *
' //| | (/ )/
'~-~-~-~-~-~""""""""""*""""""*""
~-~-~-~""ejm97""""""")/"""""(/"
'\
' \ O
' \@ |
' `\/|
' /| * *
' \| (/ )/
'~-~-~-~-~-~"""""""""*""""""*"""
~-~-~-~""ejm97""""")/"""""(/""
'\
' \ {)
A \@ |
^ `\/|
__| * *
//| | (/ )/
-~-~-~-~-~-~"""""""""*""""""*""""
~-~-~-~""ejm97""""")/"""""(/""
'\
____' \ {)
\ | \@ (_/ Rats!
__) | `\/|
(___-_) __| * *
//| | (/ )/
-~-~-~-~-~-~"""""""""*""""""*""
~-~-~-~""ejm97""""")/"""""(/""
**Gone Fishing**
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the
blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his
way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four
catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones
out and throw them at me, will you?"
"Why do you want me to throw them at you?"
"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."
"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."
"But why?"
"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if
you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy. She
prefers that for supper tonight."
-<>-
,......, | Clyde W. Watson
| FF@ | |
,'======', |
/----------\ |
:;:(_/\_):;: |
`:;\/""\/;:' |
\\\/// |
.--,____,''.____.--, |
: | __ \ / __ | ; |
| ||__| || |__|| | ,LL
| :_____||_____: |/._;
\ ;_____||_____; ./||Q
\.. ||||[]|||| \./
[| || |]
[: __ :]
| || |
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
,_(\_(\\\___ | || | ___///)__/)_.
(\/,:;:;:;:(( o`\ \___/\___/ /'o )):;:;:;:;.\/)
(/\.______,,\\__( .| | | |. (___//.._______./\)
(/ (/ (__)) ((__) \) \)
Hey Vern, Let's tie his shoe laces together!
**Fishing For Wrong Reasons**
A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The
lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down and
everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance
company paid for everything."
"That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer, "I'm here
because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a
flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."
The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a
flood?" he asked.
==========================================================
>-->FUN Places To Net Visit :)
God's Bumper Stickers
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gbumper.html
In Days Past
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/dayspast.html
Texas Rules Of Etiquette
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/texas.html
Texas Outhouse Art
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/outhouse.html
Amazing Horse Trainer
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/horsetrainer.html
Baby Thoughts
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/babythoughts.html
Did You See That?
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/seethat.html
Chinese WalMart
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chinawalmart.html
Humor In Politics 6
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/politics6.html
Sweet Little Pad
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/homepad.html
Why Me? Moments!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/whyme.html
-<>-
>From Our Friend Johanna :)
She sent us ones we have as a page here...
A Mother Horse's Love!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/motherslove2.html
The Wild Ones!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/wildones.html
---
...Great Reminders! Thanks Johanna!
-<>-
>From Our Friend PatDeE:
The lawnmower from Bowing Fix-It Shop
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E20Y3ShjcL0
---
...LOL! Great song too! Thanks PatDeE!
-<>-
Jack and the Beanstalk As Told By A Two Year Old
http://tinyurl.com/3b42omv
---
...WOW! Let's face it - the kid is S M A R T!
Our Next up and coming genius I'll bet - Thanks PatDeE!
-<>-
>From LynnLynn's Links:
Baby Name Finder Via Wesley
http://www.whatalovelyname.com/
Bad Luck
http://www.buffaloschips.com/fasd.htm
Boogie Woogie
http://www.buffaloschips.com/fsdjlk.htm
Ford Police Chase
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdfds.htm
Man Cheats DEA
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asgs.htm
Missile
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gkhjg.htm
Grrr.
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32840.htm
Messed Up
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32841.htm
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
==============================================================
>-->Quotes & Thunkers:
"According to a new report, only 12 percent of American high
school students can pass a basic history test. That's the
lowest percentage since our country was founded in 1922."
-Jay Leno
"Alabama just passed a tough immigration law that requires
schools to find out if students are in the country illegally.
Fortunately, schools know what to look for when identifying
foreign students: high test scores." -Jimmy Fallon
"Mitt Romney is the front runner at this point, mostly
because he looks like the guy they would cast as president
in a disaster movie." -Jimmy Kimmel
"Some public schools now will be serving sushi. Well, if
you love cafeteria meatloaf, you're going to really love
cafeteria sushi!" -Dave Letterman
"Scientists in China say they have found a dolphin they
previously thought was extinct. Scientists say the dolphin
is rare, beautiful, and delicious with hot mustard sauce."
--Conan O'Brien
"Here is a very odd story. A woman in Tennessee is now suing
a local pharmacy after buying what she thought were birth
control patches. They turned out to be nicotine patches. The
good news, her new baby is now down to a half a pack a day."
--Jay Leno
"A Florida man was run over by his own truck after his dog
put the truck in gear. First, it looked like an accident
but it turns out the dog was texting." -Jay Leno
"On this date in 1898 New York City became an official city.
And on this date in 1968 it became a living hell."
--Dave Letterman
"The iPhone 4 is $499 to buy outright, $199 to upgrade your
existing iPhone, and if you don't want one at all, it's $99."
-Jimmy Kimmel
"Wendy's is selling the Arby's restaurant chain to the
company that owns Cinnabon. Or as most Americans put it,
'My lunch place is selling my dinner place to my breakfast
place.'" -Jimmy Fallon
"According to the Wall Street Journal, economic experts now
fear there may be a second recession. A second recession?
When did the first one end?" -Jay Leno
"According to a new study, American fathers are spending
more than twice the amount of time with their children than
they used to. Experts say it's due to a sweeping new trend
called 'unemployment.'" -Conan O'Brien
>Updated FUN STUFF URLS - Oh Yeah :) Shangy!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/urls.html
FUN URLS
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->BECOMING A CHRISTIAN
HOW TO BE A CHRISTIAN!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->FULL LENGTH - FREE On line AUDIO MP3 Christian Foundational Class
http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=61
NEW LIFE IN CHRIST!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-->This is for all you who love food andd DARE to make it at home Yep.
You guessed it - Recipes. These are Tried and True, Yummy to the Tummy,
good old fashioned home cooking recipes that are EASY to do :)
Visit Shangy's Easy-Does-It Home Recipes:
http://www.ShangralaFamilyFun.com/easy.html
Home Recipes
>Got A good Recipe? SHARE IT HERE:
Share
A Recipe
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