Bob Norman gives a gold star (for tax dollar waste) to Broward School District Commissioner Jennifer Gottlieb, responsible for a new $25 million school in central Hollywood that did not need to be built.

On the subject of cannibals, John Linn -- an inveterate carnivore -- dines at Saffron, the Indian restaurant in West Palm, with his vegetarian girlfriend. Uh oh, John didn't like his meal! I'm worried for his date.

For those who wonder whether wearing a kilt and clothespins on your balls can make a good pick-up line, Tara Nieuwesteeg has the answer, following her recent trip to Club X-it.

In Night & Day, Mickie Centrone describes an event Monday at the Seminole Hard Rock where some poor bastard will get shot out of cannon. Oh, but survival isn't climactic enough for the promoters, who have asked the human cannonball to then show a number on his cape, which corresponds to someone's ticket and maybe that gets 'em a skeeball prize?