The Weblog of Dean Groom

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Living off world

As a shop owner, I would dearly love to be given a 200 cyclists every 16 weeks and not have to concern myself with how that came about. I would have their exclusive attention and time to force them to ride the electric bikes I like (and sell). If they refused I’d could ban them for every riding any kind of bike again. It would be a brilliant way to create a loyal following and establish myself as the electric bike authority for the future. I could bring in other electric bike friends in and together we could educate dumb cyclists and sell them stuff well into the future. The future of course I would claim will be so much better if everyone rode electric bikes.

While I’m doing this, I’d get them all to Tweet about left handed handlebars and how dumb cyclists are. It would be gr8. Then I’d wake up and realise that I’d need to design these bikes, know how electrics actually work and do some actual research.