PCOS

PCOS

In 2013, my sisters told me that they have PCOS and that it’s hereditary. I looked up symptoms and surprise–it explains alot of my “unwomanly” struggles. (There’s so much that comes with it and I am only going to touch on a few things.)

I joined a Facebook support group for those with PCOS. I didn’t have health insurance (My insurance kicks in next year–so please don’t give me a speech.) and couldn’t make it to the doc to figure all this out. My depression/anxiety got really bad and I was trying to find a way to deal with it. Unknown to me until this year–it’s part of PCOS.

See–another part of PCOS is struggling with infertility. Lucky for me, it wasn’t a problem when I was younger and I gave birth to three beautiful boys. Unfortunately, we are at 1 year of no birth control–and no baby. But, I did start smoking again after the robbery–trying to get my anxiety under control, so it gives me time to straighten that out. It doesn’t change the fact that every negative test, you die a little inside. When your body doesn’t do that thing that it’s supposed to do… You feel broken and worthless. It sucks.

You grow unwanted hair. Mr. usually helps me pluck my chin/neck–but it has gotten so bad and so annoying, I’ve started plucking myself. My legs, toes, stomach, chin–it all has an abnormal about of hair. To be honest, I stopped shaving as much because I break out, razor burn, tons of ingrown hairs–it’s expensive and ridiculous.

When my body first hit puberty, I put on 100lbs in almost one summer. Rocketing to my heaviest weight 200 lbs at 15-16 years old. I finally lost some after I had L. But I plateaued until Mr and I did Keto this year. I am the lightest I’ve been in over 10 years.

I am approaching my 30’s little by little and I still struggle with acne.