Welcome

Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and
others concerned about HIV/AIDS. Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the
conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning: Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive
and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a
username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own
physician.

All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators
of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please
provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are
true and correct to their knowledge.

Author
Topic: Memorial Service (Read 5641 times)

I have agreed to be primarily responsible for the memorial service for this year's AMG. One decision we need to make is the time and place. Since I am not from or located in Boston, I will need some advice on this one. Dennis has made one suggestion involving a local non-denominational church. We want the site to be (1) appropriate for the purpose of our gathering, (2) convenient and easily accessible for our group and preferably close to the hotel, and (3) we want to be able to have our service regardless of the weather.

We have typically had the memorial some time on Friday and that is fine with me.

Suggestions regarding place? time?

Several of you have indicated a desire to have a role in the memorial. If you would like to have a role and suggest it, feel free to PM me.

More importantly, any help or advice especially regarding location but also the time will be appreciated.

My suggestion on time would be after the morning rush hour. Maybe 11am. This gives attendees time to grab coffee and breakfast. And it's early enough to give everyone time to go and do some sightseeing before the meet and greet.

I still haven't a clue as far as location. I did come across an old article in the NY Times. There are private gardens up on Beacon Hill, and only opened to the public once a year. One of the gardens is owned by a young man who dedicated his to his companion who died of AIDS. This may be an appropriate spot if we could gain permission. Here's a link to the article.

Good work Dennis! I've been googling for months tryting to find if there was some sort of existing HIV/AIDS memorial in Boston. Gary can you lawyer your way in?

If we want to plan on doing it in the Public Garden, we do not need a permit (I just called the city parks department and someone named John Bailey said as long as we have no amplified sound we're fine.) We can scout out a location Thursday morning.

I really like the idea of the private Garden..can anyone contact Mr Anastasio anyone in Boston Know him??? ...the Publiic Gardens are a real treat for touring and sight seeing But a garden especially for an AIDS victim sound ideal..

I agree that a private garden would be ideal. The Public Gardens would be nice too -- although they can be a bit crowded -- especially the closer you get to the lunch hour during weekdays.

Another possibility for a slightly less crowded "public garden"setting is the Rose Garden in the Back Bay Fens (Fenway area). It's a beautiful little place with all kinds of roses and surrounded by a tall hedge, so it's sort of private. It's not too far from the Chandler -- near the back of the Museum of Fine Arts and about 4 blocks or so from Fenway Park. I used to live around the corner from it -- it's a very calming and peaceful setting.I'm having a little trouble finding info on it right now -- can't seem to recall it's official name. I need to finish gettng ready to catch a flight (for a weekend in Boston area, of all places). I'll try and do some more research into the garden when I return.

My only other suggestion would be to contact a big ASO there. The Boston Living Center is actually rather close to The Chandler. There website lists lots of information and seems like they would have plenty of room to host such a gather (assuming they are willing). It also seems like a way to meet more people and also promote the forums to other HIV+ folks.

I'm not sure how they would react but it seems like a win for everyone and we wouldn't have to worry about the weather. Since I suggested it if people are interested I'd be willing to contact and see what they have to say.

AA

Logged

It is not the arrival that matters. It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

I would love it if you would call them and see if their space might be available to us on Friday, August 7 at 11 am for a memorial service. I think our group would clearly meet their mission statement and we might benefit greatly from seeing their facilities. While the gardens are nice, this leaves no "fallback" if the weather is not cooperative. I also like that they may be close to our hotel. Let me know what you find out and I very much appreciate the suggestion.

I contacted the facilities manager at the Boston Living Center about possibly using one of their rooms for a Memorial Service. Here's the email I got back from him. Please let me know how everyone would like me to proceed.

Yes you can use one of our rooms on Friday Aug. 7th at 11am. Our largest conference room holds about 30-35 people max. I will go ahead and reserve it for your group. I will also invite members of our organization to attend if they like. Do you have any flyers or material I can put out regarding this meeting? If you could e-mail me that I can put that out to publicize the event among our clients. Thanks.

I think this is a wonderful idea. I'm wondering how many people outside of our group would actually show up - could get really crowded. Thank you, Andy!

Mum

If everyone is OK with the idea of having the service there (I'll give it a couple of days for people to respond) I'll dash off another email. I thought it was really cool that he wanted to publicize the event among their clients but I'm not sure how the rest of you would feel about this. Would you want some sort of flyer up at the Boston Living Center ... I could a little cut & paste to include the logo from this years t-shirt.

I also directed him to to look at the gatherings forum in particular but this site in general to help increase awareness.

AA

Logged

It is not the arrival that matters. It is the journey along the way. -- Michel Montaigne

I would like to offer my services in helping to compose the Memorial service for AMG 2009. I have not done one in years, but given the past two years, I feel a deep desire to do one again. I also think it's a great idea to publicize our planned event, because you can never invite too many people, to remember those we have lost.

While we might wish for a truly private ceremony, I would like to see us use our strength, to remind Bostonians, that the AIDS war is far from over.

I love the idea! Barring any serious objections (and there do not appear to be any) I think we can append this to the agenda. I am coordinating the service itself and some of you have let me know by PM what role you would like to play in the service. If anyone else would like to play a particular role, please PM me and let me know what you would like to do. I am very collegial and collaborative about arranging these kinds of events so I am more interested in knowing how you wish to participate. Armed with that information, I will use my professional skill to organize a memorial service for us. So...please let me know by PM (if you have not already done so) if you wish to participate.

I only ask because if we are opening up the meet and greet, I need to supply a head count prior to me arriving in Boston to ensure there is enough food prepared and the space currently reserved is large enough. They of course would need to pay the cost if at all possible. Our group is billed based on headcount and we have a minimum to meet. We wouldn't turn anyone away, though.

I really like the idea of opening up our memorial servise to others..but I would like our Meet and Greet to be kept just for us..sorry if that sound selfish but that's how I feel about it..how does everyoe else feel about this?

I think the Boston Living Center is a great idea -- Stanhope St. is just a couple of blocks from the hotel. Plus..... having it inside negates any weather concerns. This spring/summer has been a very rainy one in New England -- when I was up there this past weekend, I believe I saw a few Arks being built!Seriously -- last weekend was the first rainfree weekend in a long time, I'm told.

I agree with Jan. I'd like AMG to remain AMG, but don't mind having others share in our memorial service. My concern is the biggest conference room holds 30-35 max - we have almost that many coming already. Also, if there are guests, will they be allowed to speak and remember those they have lost? It would almost be expected - and respectful. Things could get a bit long. Selfish? Probably.

I am seriously doubting that we will have a crowding problem from non-AMG members. If we do have some new folk, they may join our group and in the years to come we will always be grateful we had this opportunity for our paths to cross. A memorial service is not a time to be selfish...it will hopefully be a beautiful occasion for holy remembering. We have this grief in common with one another...including those who may be meeting AMG for the first time. I suggest we "go with the flow" on this and not worry. I am willing to bet everything will work out fine.

Definitely, memorial service embraces all who are in attendance. Remember the odd hooded little guy who was poised on the stone wall in Mexico City? He was focused on us throughout the whole ceremony. It's like he was meant to be there.A bit of my own metaphysical spook stuff but I swear I got kindred vibes from him.