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Well, it’s our last day here in the Here’s Some Awesome Beach House, and it’s been an unqualified hoot. Gotta’ remember to slide that ficus plant in front of the fist-sized drywall hole in the rumpus room. And yes, while it’s a time for goodbyes it’s also time to say hello to our cousins across the pond as they kick off the 2012 Olympic games. Here to tell us all about it is London Mayor and one-time TV presenter/journalist, Boris Johnson. On behalf of Wheeeeeeee, I declare these games closed. Have a great rest of the summer everyone!

Summer is America’s season. Across the Lower 48, we are thrust outdoors, driven to char, and compelled to abuse notebooks. It’s also the time of the Summer Album: a little gem that catches our fancy in May and carries us until the last grain of sand is whisked from our nether-regions. In 2012, it’s King Tuff’s self-titled monster. In 1983 on the East Coast, I can only imagine it was the Cybernetic Dreams of Pi by The Slickee Boys, propelled by the single “When I Go to the Beach” you see above.

There’s so much to like here. Iced Budweiser in a briefcase. A riff that would make The Buzzcocks proud (or possibly litigious). Dancing hot dogs and suns with bad teeth animated so crudely it makes The Holy Grail look like Avatar. And more 80’s-style skin than you can wag your thang at.

Now get out there tear up the weekend, America! Tell ’em The Slickee Boys sent ya.

The Japanese Koreans have gone and outdone us yet again. Who remembers how many licks it took to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? More importantly, who cares? I mean, that was ages ago. Where is the intellectual curiosity that made this nation great? These intrepid young souls have embarked on a mission to figure out how many rubber bands you can place around a watermelon before it bursts from the pressure. I won’t give it away, but here’s a hint: it’s sure as hell more than 3.

Posted by Dave from wheeeeeeee.com. Guest-editing each Friday in July!

Imagine for a moment that Pinterest was conceived and marketed in 1992. How would that go? This video dares to imagine such a hypothetical. It’s a good idea with an absolutely spot-on graphic interpretation. (demerits for the cheesy warped-tape effect and the curious VO treatment, but let’s not be too picky.)

More broadly, can we discuss Pinterest for a sec?

Chock full of humblebrags, domesticated Photoshops, and unveiled pathos, it’s not just wildly successful: it may also be the most estrogen-y place on the internet. And that’s not a bad thing. In fact, as a man, I find it strangely wonderful…a glimpse through the keyhole of a forbidden city, a city with gilded sidewalks upon which I shall never confidently tread.