Last saturday my husband was rushed to the hospital he had a blood clot in his leg and the bypass they had done last year closed up any way they are trying to save the leg they are doing everything possible, my panic was under control all week then today he has to go back to surgery and I went to the hospital they moved his surgery up to 3 and I lost it panic wise I had to come home. I have to go back to the hospital by 2 and my panic is out of control every fiber in my body is screaming dont go but I know I have to please just some words of how to get thourgh another 8 hour surgery I am sitting here crying cause I know I have to be there but I dont know if I can do it I feel so guilty and like a faliue Hugs Anna

Hi Taz2You! Man i am so sorry about your situation i can't imagine how you must feel but yet i have an idea.The only advice i can offer you is what i would do in your situation.First of all i dont know if you take any meds right now, but i would take some kind of sedative like xanax or ativan to relax you. If you dont have access to any meds i would just try breathing and calming myself down and cocentrate on staying calm! Then i would go back to the hospital calmly and see him off to surgery and dont show him how afraid you are because it may make him more afraid.Then honestly i would go back home depending on how far you live from the hospital and try to relax for those 8 hours,give the medical staff your phone number and tell them if any problems arise to call you! If you decide to go home while you are there think about the posotive things that can happen not the negative or try sleeping and set an alarm clock so you can wake up in time enough to be back at the hospital to see him when he wakes up! If you dont feel comfortable with leaving the hospital at all stay there and try to relax think about the days following his recovery and not about whats going on with him now.For instance think about things you can do to make him feel better if he does lose his leg.Think about the fact that if he loses his leg at least you will still have him.With todays technology,prostetics and everything and with you being with him every step of the way he can live a perfectly normal life! THen think about how greatful to god you and him both will be if he doesn't lose his leg!! I hope i have helped you in some kind of way!I wish you the best honey!!! I will have you and your hubby in my thoughts and remember try to keep a cool head for you and him both!

Hey Taz, hi this is Kitt. By now you are back at the hospital and you have gone past the panic. I know it is hard and the scary part of having your husband in surgery makes you feel so alone. You are strong and I know you will push the panic down and just stay in the moment. Let out the tears at that will release some of the pent up anxiety.

Take it one step at a time. Don't try to act brave in front of others, you don't have to make others feel you don't need someone to lean on. Reach out and hold on. You will get through this. You must so no beating yourself up my friend. Be good to you and we are all here to help you.

Thank you for the support, I did go back to the hospital and I managed to stay untill the operation was over and I spoke with the DR. then I had to get out of there,my daughter stayed with my husband, the outcome we still dont know. Dr says at least 5 to 6 more operations and he will be in the hospital for at least 4 more weeks and then to a rehab, but he stressed that he is still not out of danger of losing the leg, if he does keep it he will have no use of his foot it will just be there no feeling, he will have to wear a brace to be able to walk, he is only 59 to young for all this to be happing, I am just gald that he is still here with me and there is hope. Dr says if all does go right he might be home by mid to end of March. Another operation to take place this friday. My daughter has to leave tomrrow back to ky I am trying to take it day by day the panic and stress is overwhelming but somehow some way I have to get through it. I am just freaking out thinking about going out alone ect ect. I do have my sons here who will help me .will let you all know what Friday brings. Keep us in your prayers. Hugs Anna