Dubai is a perfect storm of young, single people in a socially conservative
setting. William Everett explains how expats go about courtship
without ending up in prison

There are a lot of attractive, single people with money to spend and free time to fill in Dubai. However, Islam is the UAE’s official religion: sex outside marriage is illegal, and even public displays of affection can land the amorous in hot water. So how does the expat man approach the ritual of courting without flouting local mores and getting kicked out of the country?

Here’s a step-by-step guide from a man on the inside.

Young, free and single

Unless you are working on a construction site, you will meet good-looking women everyday in Dubai. Hospitality is big business here, and where there is hospitality, there is glamour. Everyone is dolled up, from the bar staff to the fun-loving cabin crew who stop over in Dubai for an energetic form of rest and relaxation.

Advertising, events, glossy magazines – Dubai’s glamour propaganda is peddled by models and media darlings. Even patriarchal professions like oil and gas and banking seem to employ female staff of a certain aesthetic standard. With a median age of 27 (male and female), a vibrant nightlife and year-round sunshine, the whole thing can feel like a Club 18-30 holiday that never ends.

Dubai is a sociable city. Expats spend their tax-free salaries eating, drinking and generally showing off in public, so there is ample opportunity to meet the desired sex. This is not a place for shrinking violets; striking up a conversation with a stranger is easy and normal. 85pc of the city's population is from overseas, which means most Dubai residents have gone through the process of landing in a foreign land and going out to make friends. It's a shared experience that brings a sense of unity

With such a transient populace, impenetrable cliques are rare. You will find yourself collecting more business cards than you know what to do with. It’s up to you to decide if the connection is personal, professional, or both.

Moving to Dubai is much like your first year at university. Everything is new and exciting, and you’ll meet other ‘freshers’ just as wide-eyed as you. Thankfully, there are loads of 'second' and 'third years' more than happy to show you around. “How long have you been in Dubai?” is the standard question when meeting a fellow expat. The usual answer is under five years.

Occasionally, you’ll meet someone who says, “I grew up here”, and you’ll feel a bit like a gatecrasher.

Asking her out

Let’s say you meet a charming girl – we’ll call her Sophie – you get on famously and you’d like to see her again. The classic, “Would you like to go for a drink sometime?” is a safe bet. Yes, you can consume alcohol in Dubai, and a post-work drink is a perfectly acceptable first date. However, it will be in a sterile hotel bar and it will cost you a fortune. You could opt for a dingy hotel sports bar, but you are unlikely to see the girl again unless she is a chain-smoking football fan.

For an only-in-Dubai date, you could go skiing on ‘real’ snow at the indoor ski centre Ski Dubai, admire the view from the world’s tallest building, Burj Khalifa, or jostle with tourists at the world’s biggest fountain display. A cultural date might involve an art exhibition in the Al Quoz industrial district, or a burlesque show at The Act – a faux-baroque supper club on the 42nd floor of the Shangri-La Hotel.

If you settle on a cinema date, take a jumper as the air-conditioning in cinemas would make a penguin shiver. That way, you can be a true gent and offer the garment to your companion.

Date night

Many Dubai men ascribe all their power and self-worth to their car, much like Samson and his hair. Pick Sophie up in a car and it will show that you are independent. It will also take taxis out of the equation - no one likes waiting for a cab in the blistering heat

Getting-to-know-you chat in Dubai is often fascinating because you are meeting women from all over the world. Sometimes Dubai is their first taste of travel, but more often their lives have been nomadic, and their stories reflect that. You will be able to glean whether Sophie is planning a future in Dubai with a husband and children in her sights, or simply treating the city as a working holiday, complete with holiday fling. Either way, matters of the heart can always change the best-laid plans.

Would you like to come back to mine for a coffee?

Once you have picked up the bill – only the most emancipated woman insist on paying their share in Dubai – you may suggest going elsewhere for a drink. If you hold a personal alcohol license, or habitually break the law, you can invite Sophie to your place for a digestif.

Only in the privacy of your own home should you consider going in for a kiss. Public displays of affection – or PDAs as they are joylessly known – are forbidden in Dubai, and can land both parties in a lot of trouble. You can chance a cheeky snog in a lift, but you run the risk of the doors opening before your floor, exposing your misdemeanour. Even the back of a taxi is dodgy ground for kissing. If your taxi driver takes offence, he may well report you to the police. You can see why British couple Michelle Palmer and Vince Acors caused such a stir back in 2008.

If Sophie does stay the night, you can expect disapproving looks from security staff when you leave your apartment block in the morning. If your guest is of a certain ethnicity, they will assume she is a prostitute. Some security staff will confiscate her passport at reception on arrival, and return it when she leaves.

This insidious code of conduct can make you feel like mischievous teenagers. But weren’t those teenage days sort of fun? If no one is getting hurt, and no one winds up in trouble, what harm in a little sneaking around?