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High Risk Pregnancies?

Right here I go again with my anxieties. Bear with me, I'll be as brief as I can!
I got a phone call earlier this morning from the midwife that did my booking in appointment. She has said that the high risk consultant wants to see me and monitor my pregnancy, not because it's twins but because I have lupus and other antibodies..Ro +, La+ and cardiolipin + (we knew this before pregnancy).
I asked her a lot of questions and she said the babies can be at risk of neonatal lupus syndrome and having heart problems caused by my lupus and the other antibodies, and I will also have to be closely monitored for a few months after pregnancy incase I develop blood clots. She was very frank which I actually prefer, but I came off the phone and was a wreck right away. Now of course I have looked all this up and freaked myself out all over again. Does anybody else have auto immune disorders that can give me some perspective on this. I know it's a long shot but I am so sick of being anxious and have a long way to go yet.

I'm afraid I don't have any info on Lupus, but I just wanted to say that I think you should share your anxieties with your midwife or your GP. It is completely normal to be worried during pregnancy (I was), especially when you have been through a lot to get there in the first place. Having said that, this is such a precious time and it would be so much better for you if you could feel less anxious - don't suffer in silence and pretend to the medical professionals that you are taking it all in your stride. I have been guilty of that. Perhaps ask for some extra help - you might only need to lean on one for a few weeks and then your anxiety will likely subside. I think going through IVF puts you on a state of 'red alert' from the start because it is such a stressful business. Hopefully someone will take that on board and be able to help in some way - perhaps swimming, relaxation, acupuncture, just talking to a good friend over a cuppa.

Thanks Jenny, I really appreciate your reply. It seems that every time I feel a bit less anxious something happens to make me worry all over again. You would think now that I'm 13 weeks my worry would be lessening but it's so hard sometimes not to stress. Your right about this process making you on red alert all the time and I know I'm not alone with that feeling. Thanks and I hope your doing ok xx

Hi clarabel, I don't know anything about ur specific condition, but I'm sure if it was a high risk they would have went over it IVF stage. I think as far as the maternity care goes they will have set things they have to follow but it doesn't mean that the risks will happen to you.

As jenny says I find acupuncture really good for relaxation, I see a woman in Cumbernauld, she was previously a high dependency nurse so has some medical background too which can help
xx

Hi Pip, the only thing that was said at the beginning of this was that I would be a higher risk of early miscarriage, the nurses knew very little about my condition. The midwife said at the appointment I would be monitored more closely but didn't say the things she said on the phone about the level of risk. It's all very confusing, I'm trying not to read anymore because it's just making me more anxious than I already am.
X

I know that feeling, google is evil!
All you can do is look after yourself eat healthy etc and let them look after you. I know sometimes it's better for people to get straight to the point but if she was going to be frank she should have done it in person when u could ask questions
Hope ur ok
xx

Just to throw in here that the midwives don't know everything and sometimes want to prepare you for worst case scenarios. However you will probably find that when you are being monitored it isn't as worrying as you first thought it would be. Xx

Hi Onewish, thanks for your reply. I'm trying not to stress about it now that I've relaxed a bit and try and see it as a good thing that I'll be monitored closely. Easier said than done for me but I will try my best lol xx

Hi Hayley, its really kind of you to think about that. If your friend is still on here then it might be good to message her if she doesn't mind. I don't know anyone else who has lupus, and all I know about the impacts on pregnancy is from Dr Google which isn't always helpful.