Mother Helps Pupils Bring Cheer To Homeless, Abused

April 28, 1999|By Tina Kapinos. Special to the Tribune.

Sandy Swift had always volunteered at her children's schools, serving as room mother for each of her three children at least once. So, when her son Matthew Horsey, 13, asked her last year to accompany him and 80 of his junior high classmates to the Salvation Army Emergency Lodge, she not only went, but she got permission to bring along his younger sister.

Located on Chicago's North Side, the lodge serves homeless families and battered women with children. The lodge can accommodate up to 120 people at a time, who may stay there up to 90 days.

Typically, a little more than 100 people are living at the lodge, said Sacheeba Neal, activity coordinator.

"For me, it was just a real eye-opening experience to see these women who are so young, and they're homeless for whatever reason, and they may not have a job and may not even have any skills," said Swift, a Northbrook resident.

"You walk away from there (saying), `Oh, my God, I can't imagine someone telling me I have 90 days to find a job, find an apartment, get my life on track,' " Swift said. "The feeling they must have of that time bomb ticking away."

Since then, Swift, 45, has been on three more trips to the shelter, including this school year with the class of her 11-year-old daughter, Kristin Horsey.

The trips bring together students from Northbrook Junior High and children in the shelter for an afternoon of art projects, games and camaraderie. Teachers Dale Elkins, Bobby Goldman and Heather Julian make the visits with their students four times a year, accompanied by about six or seven parent volunteers and usually a school administrator or two. It's all part of the Quest curriculum, which also covers topics such as cooperation skills, goal-setting, and getting along with family.

As part of the service portion of the curriculum, 7th-grade students plan four fundraisers during the school year, raising about $3,000 to $4,000 a year for the shelter, Elkins said. Students also collect used clothing and stuffed animals to donate to the shelter's residents.

Swift said the efforts are greatly appreciated by the homeless children.

"They give these kids these used stuffed animals, and you would have thought that they gave them gold," Swift said.

On a typical trip, Swift might do anything from helping children make snow globes out of baby food jars to holding a mother's baby to give her a break.

"She is one of those parents who gets right in and gets involved," Elkins said.

Swift said she prefers that to spending time chatting with the other parent volunteers.

"I'd much rather sit down with the kids and get into the nitty-gritty," Swift said.

One reason the junior high chose to start working with the shelter nine years ago was that it was one of the few places that would allow the students to spend time with the people they were helping without having to undergo hours of training, Elkins said.

The experience has had an impact on Swift and her children.

Kristin Horsey said the trips make her feel bad for the families in the shelter and make her want to help them. At the same time, they make her realize how lucky she and her family are.

"We're surrounded by a lot of money in Northbrook," Swift said. Many of the classmates of her oldest son, Bryan Horsey, 15, even drive better cars than she does, she said. The trips to the shelter give her children a different perspective.

"By going with me and seeing these things and participating, I think it shows them that we are very fortunate," she said.

Swift recalled one trip in which Northbrook Junior High Principal Gordon Hood dressed up as Santa Claus for the children in the shelter. Swift asked a girl who had been paired with her daughter what she told Santa she wanted for Christmas. The girl replied, "A dress." Thinking of the typical North Shore kids who always have a laundry list of what they want, Swift said she asked the girl what else she asked for. The girl answered, "All I asked him for was a dress. All I want is a dress."

Touched that the girl only wanted one thing, Swift talked to the shelter's director to find out the girl's name. Swift and her daughter went shopping to buy the girl a dress as well as a purse, tights and hair accessories to go with it. They sent it anonymously to her from "Santa."

"It was the most impractical dress," Swift said. "But my daughter said, `If I were her, I'd want to open up a box with this most beautiful dress and feel like a princess.' "

Swift said she enjoys going to the shelter and helping women and children there forget the circumstances in which they live, if only for an afternoon. Though she said she has always felt a connection with kids, she added that she feels a connection with the mothers in the shelter as well.