Wisconsin Republican Rep. Jim Sensenbrenner hates how Michelle Obama is constantly forcing sickening Muslim traditions like "vegetables" and "exercise" on the youth of America—especially when she herself is so disgustingly corpulent, in the butt area. He hates it so much he can't even keep quiet about it!

Our source, a Democratic operative who heard the whole thing, said he was "very loud". Sensenbrenner was overheard saying that after buying all their "crap" (his word) a woman approached him and praised first lady Michelle Obama. He told the woman that Michelle should practice what she preaches—"she lectures us on eating right while she has a large posterior herself."

The thing is? Crypto-racism, misogyny, inaccuracy, and complete and utter point-missing aside, "Michelle Obama is fat even though she forced your kid to see a lettuce" is a favorite trope of the right wing. Remember when The Washington Postpublished an article called "Michelle Obama orders 1,700-calorie meal at Shake Shack"? It's because Matt Drudge's favorite story besides "black teenager fights white teenager" is "Michelle Obama Ate Fast Food," and the Post want a Drudge Report link.

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And you know, you could spend days explaining why "Michelle Obama has a big butt" is not only an entirely incoherent criticism of programs designed to encourage healthy living, it's also basically racist? But why bother, really?

In any event, Sensenbrenner says he'll apologize to the first lady. He should probably do it over the phone? Because Michelle Obama is in really good shape, and Jim Sensenbrenner is... not.