Was she playing me or was she for real?

sorry if this is a long read but I need to get all the important points across!

i had class with this girl (college), we would always look at each other but we sat in different parts and I was always talking to/sitting with another girl so I'd never talk to her (although I wanted to). well on the last day of class I talked to her finally and we added each other on facebook. the semester ended and winter break came along so I wouldn't see her in person for a while. a couple of times I ran into her at a bar but we were with our separate friends so it wouldn't be long, or one of us was leaving.

we started text, she would leave things on my wall, she'd call me babe/handsome/other pet names (i'd return them to). it was a nice build up for a date. I didn't see any other guys leaving her stuff on her wall or see her or vice versa either, only me.

anyway we got to the "let's make plans/hang out/get together" point. and I'd say OK I'm free next week then by like Mon of the following week I'd tell her "lets do this" on Thursday, she'd say OK then BAIL on me the day before or same day. it happened several times, one after the other. it lasted for months, like every other weekend it'd happen (and fail). I didn't understand it at all.

keep in mind that SHE initiated 75% of the time. it's not like I'd constantly chase after her and pressure her into a date. she would call/text/fb I'm me saying "we need to get together soon" and when I'd make these plans she'd bail. eventually I thought she was just playing me so I gave up.

what happened? was this my fault?

one last thing...a long while after I stopped talking to her, I met this girl who actually ended up being her friend (although I didn't know at the time). the way this girl approached me and talked to me made me feel like she already knew of me (you know that feeling?) and later I found out she was a really good friend of the girl. in our conversation she kept talking about how "some guys are clueless when it comes to understanding girls"...was she dropping a hint? lol. what did I do wrong?

Most Helpful Guy

And by that I don't mean like a drill sergeant. basically you need to be confident in your decision making skills. even if theyre wrong, who cares, make a joke out of it.

Dont ask her if she wants to go out somewhere. find where shed like to go and then surprise her one day.

I knew a girl that did the same sh*t to me, but I fixed that problem one day.

what happened was that this girl was into bondage, so one day (after a few bailouts) I got tired of it all and took her to a Sex Convention. I didn't ask her if she wanted to go. I told her that I was coming to pick her up and take her somewhere.

she was nervous, and kept asking where I was taking her, I suggested to her that if she was scared she can call any1 and tell em what's going on, give em my name etc. (ive been out with her alone before, not like a date but more like, shed be waiting for my bus with me, or wed go to get coffee after work or on our break.) anyways, we got to the convention and her eyes lit up.

We had so much FUN. =D

REMEMBER this is only an example. do something that follows the same concept but is geared towards your personality.

What Girls Said 2

some girls are very shy, and want something to happen but are too nervous to do it I'm not sure why she would keep saying she wants to try and hang out and not do it though I feel like she is a rare case so I wouldn't really worry about running into this kind of situation again

no, we both just kinda stopped talking. again it was a while ago and I think she has a boyfriend now anyway. I am just wondering what happened. if she was single though I would try to make it happen again, I just want to know what I did wrong so I don't do it again lol