Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

You know what you need? A ducky mat for your shower that way you won't slip when you're getting hot and steamy. Your girlfriend will be so impressed by your caution it'll be a guaranteed 300% boost of hot and steamy times in the shower.