That’s it … Greeting card copywriter is my next job.

Today’s Weight … 123.0

Two tenths of a freakin’ pound?!!? Well, alert the damned media. That can be accomplished with a good nose blowing.

I was sifting through the greeting cards at Target recently when I came across some pretty hilarious copywriting. Of course, I guess I shouldn’t be so surprised. The store’s mission statement reads “Expect more of everything. More great design, more choices and more designer-created items that you won’t find anywhere else.“

Well, maybe not the Merona terry swimsuit coverup you’re going to see on half a dozen other women every time you head to the pool. But these card designs are pretty unique. (Please forgive the crappy photo quality. ODNT can’t afford to hire a professional photographer … yet.)

I’ll lead with these two … both of which simply say ‘Happy Easter’ inside … since I already tweeted them earlier. I’m a Catholic girl, born and bred, so I think it’s okay that I’m laughing. Or maybe now I’m going to hell. Just remember, if you laugh, you’re going with me. (Please bring sunscreen. Ooh, and beer.)

And there were others with humorous covers and insides. Again, if I had a photographer (Holly!), the presentation here would be much lovelier. In retrospect, I should’ve probably put the outside and inside of the card together in the same picture. Oh, well. Hindsight is 50/50 … or 20/20 … or whatever. Anyway, until I can afford a staff, you’ll have to settle for a mindless stream featuring outside-of-card then inside-of-card shots. For most of you, it should be pretty easy to follow along. Enjoy!

I hope to see a card like one of these in my mailbox very soon. I’m so proud of you, Target. (Sniff)