Tense about tense.

First of all, thanks to all of you that have stopped by to take a look at HA. And special thanks to anyone who actually read that self reflecting drivel. Please feel free to leave a comment, even if they’re negative. ADD sufferers would rather have negative attention than no attention at all.

Yesterday I laid down some rules about what I’m not going to write about and I intend to follow them faithfully, unless I don’t.

Thanks for indulging me while I try to write my way out of this fucking block that has had me paralyzed for most of the month. I think that’s the key, just banging out my thoughts, getting down on paper what I’m thinking about the process. On paper?? WTF? Next I’ll be putting out an aÂ record. Another key I’ve been thinking about is finding a voice. From December of ’03 through May of Â ’08, I Â had a blog going on Xanga. I think I had a voice there, but I think I lost it when I started this blog. I have been trying a little too hard to perfect my syntax and grammar and all that high falutin’ stuff. I didn’t want to screw up the tense or shift viewpoints or be cliched (which I’ll probably never avoid) so I’ve been thinking more than I’ve been writing. Part of the problem might be years trying so hard to be dry, concise and professional in my business memos at Dex. Writing for the humor impaired. Â I didn’t really succeed at that either. A colloquial voice works best for me, kind of blue collar casual. Some of you that know me might chuckle over me thinking of myself as blue collar, with my pampered youth and all those years of being a corporate lackey. But as a pup I spent a lot of time wandering around the West Fargo Stockyards, were I learned my most colorful vocabulary. That’s about as blue collar as you can get. Plus I’ve worked plenty of blue collar jobs back in the day, too many to list here, but that’s a post of it’s its own. Anyway, I’m not going to fret too much about crimes against the King’s English, but just try to pound out the words in a more casual, conversational manner.

i believe you want “of ITS own,” bahaa. how long have i been off xanga, and i still go back and look at old entries and correct grammar and spelling mistakes. typos, though, i leave. because that gives my writing its character. har.

i haven’t felt like writing in a long time. i kind of think that blogging filled a particular void for me, which is now being filled by other stuff (that’s what she said?) i do miss it, i just can’t think of anything to say.

i managed to catch up with most of the old crew at facebook, and the back-and-forth goes on just like it always did. only now i don’t even have to write a blog for it, i can just type a sentence about the sandwich i just ate, and suddenly there’s a 20-comment profanity-filled thread. it’s awesome.