Ok:
- i looked wrong, there are only fcron.allow and .deny files
- i moved those 2 files restarted and noticed i didnt get mail at all, but the script wont work either since the first line in the script mails me that it works (php -f /home/<user>/public_html/cronjob.php works fine)
- moved the 2 files back and no email at all as well now
- fcrontab -u <user> -l still shows the cron
- all logs in /var/log/cron are empty!