Level 69 Troll

platypus.

Want sweet, sweet Brownie Points and the envy of your peers, using only your fingers and ears? Now’s your chance!

Forumwarz occasionally hosts and posts podcasts featuring your “favorite” Crotch Zombie employees in “exciting” sessions with Q&A, commentary, and general stream-of-semi-consciousness drivel mostly meant to be relevant to your interests. These broadcasts often contain sneak previews of upcoming content additions and changes; gameplay tweaks and nerfs; and other potentially helpful information along with a chance to drift into a sensual lull to the sound of the staff’s voice.

Not everyone has the time, patience or gastrointestinal fortitude to listen to a full broadcast, however. Accordingly, in an effort to make these broadcasts more accessible, this contest is being run in the hope of making full transcripts of these broadcasts available to all. In text form they’ll become skimmable, searchable, and ready to be referenced, mocked and held to account. In return, we’re offering Brownie Points and opportunities!

You’ll be asked to download and transcribe a five-minute section of the latest Forumwarz podcast, hosted by Jalapeno Bootyhole. (I know, I know. Please don’t run away, though. Hear me out. We’ll get through this together.)

Your transcription should be as word-accurate and legible as possible, just like any other transcript. An example of a professional transcript can be found here. That’s a little boring and sterile, though, so there’s a twist:. In addition to being well-formatted, clear and accurate, you are asked to make your best attempt to entertain and convey the nuances of what you hear. This can be anything from describing awkward silences, fumbled words, bodily noises, technical difficulties, lapses into Canuck accentuation and even generally describing the spirit of a portion of monologue.

Use your imagination, but don’t go overboard. Remember that the purpose of the transcript is primarily to convey the actual words and content, not to tell your own story. Readers should be able to easily tell the main content from any editorial notes.

Pick a five-minute range from the broadcast to transcribe, then post your choice in this thread. Please try to pick a range that hasn’t yet been taken, if possible.

Transcribe and type up what you hear in a text editor such as Word, Works, OpenOffice Writer, Google Docs, or any other program that can save as .doc format.

Read the rest of this post and its conditions.

When done, send or share your entry to me at deadened+stenocontest@gmail.com along with your in-game username. Please don’t post your entry on these forums, as others could easily steal your effort.

Wait to see if you are a winner!

CONTEST CLOSES FOR ENTRIES ON SUNDAY, MAY 31, 2009 AT NOON CENTRAL TIME.

****ed that you haven’t heard what the prizes are, yet? Okay, here you are!

FIRST PLACE: 3 BP, and first dibs on future transcription jobs

SECOND PLACE: 2 BP, and second call on future transcription jobs

THIRD PLACE: 1 BP, and third in line on future transcription jobs

There will be future transcription jobs available, so this contest also serves to gather a pool of potential willing and talented stenographers to type up and wikify them, for similar payment (and, according to JB, the possibility of an official stenographer’s E-Peen™). You’ll be doing the community a great service, too.

Where’s the small print? The terms? The conditions? Everyone loves conditions!Yeah, okay, there are some. Here it they are:

By entering, you agree to have most or all of your transcription work officially published on and used by Forumwarz and Crotch Zombie Productions, most likely in the Spoilerpedia. Your work will be credited to you and you will retain final say in case of it ever being used elsewhere.

You are not obligated to participate in any future transcription opportunities either by winning or losing, and this is not to be considered a professional “real job.”

Entries will be judged primarily on accuracy, formatting, legibility, and enjoyability. You hold Crotch Zombie Productions harmless for any damages incurred to your hands, ears, and/or mental well-being from partaking in this contest, which may involve discomfort.

Level 69 Troll

platypus.

As of now, we only have four or five entries. Please keep in mind that it’s perfectly acceptable to transcribe a section that may have already been wholly or partially transcribed!

Since we’ll be picking three winners, this is looking like a very, very easy contest to get some BP from. Please consider contributing and entering. It’s great practice for your typing skills, and the odds are good!