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‘At work, at home, in relationships’ said one proponent, Dave Brainfart, ‘not thinking about the consequences of anything can have a real life-enriching impact, whether through hare-brained fecklessness or simply through unthinking the drudgery of a dead-end job.’

London commuters begged London transport unions tonight to extend the current 48 hour tube strike indefinitely, citing “an immeasurable improvement to our quality of life and general well-being” since suspension of services began.

Mottled 1990s variety performer Mr Blobby was confirmed last night as the new Chief Executive of the ailing Co-operative Bank.
The grinning pink and yellow inflatable would bring to the role of Chief Executive a greater sense of decorum, gravitas and reassurance to the bank’s customers than his predecessor, claimed one insider.

‘We’re delighted to have appointed Mr Blobby to lead our organisation through this difficult period. His name is synonymous with integrity, fiscal responsibility and prudent planning. And he’s thick skinned enough to bounce back from any early setbacks. Literally’.