Many parents think success first, happiness second, but that’s not how it works. Happiness fuels success and not the other way around, Achor says. The problem with putting success before happiness is that success is a moving target—once you achieve a victory (something you thought would bring happiness) you push the goalpost out, so happiness keeps getting pushed over the horizon. The same philosophy applies to your kids.

It was no surprise that he presented the Gospel that day. He spoke boldly of sin, the cross, and the amazing grace of God. He spoke of God’s infinite willingness to forgive, the brevity of life and the fleeting pleasures of this world. He looked into the eyes of the many high ranking political leaders who were there that day and challenged them to contemplate death and the life after. He was so bold, so unashamed of the Gospel—yet so winsome. To this day, I’m not sure I have ever heard the truth spoken in love more effectively. I had heard him preach a thousand times, but this time was particularly moving. I’ll never forget that day.

But God sees purity as vital and His boundaries for intimacy and sex were displayed in the garden when Eve was taken out of Adam’s rib. When she was created, she was already his wife. There was no pre-marital anything for Adam and Eve.

Sex is for marriage. Simply trust that God has His reasons for designing it that way.

Just incase you need more convincing, here are five simple reasons not to go all the way with your fiancé:

Because you want God’s blessing!

Because you want your spouse’s utmost respect!

Because, believe it or not, sexual tension is a gift from God!

Because you want to be baggage free!

Because you are part of a Holy generation!

I know it is hard to wait. But waiting builds character and character is a highly sought after gem in this world! Please your Savior who gave up everything for you!

Be self-controlled, filled with the Spirit and keep your engagement short.

Going after your dreams was never meant to be outside of the context of community. Even better, part of our mandate is to inspire, encourage and empower those around us into their dreams. If you take what I give you and go further with it, you have honored me and I celebrate that. So how do you intentionally develop people around you?

Therefore, even if you have a vision or idea of what your future husband will be like, it is important that you define the specific traits in your life partner. I was in a bible study where we were required to make a “husband list” for homework. It couldn’t just be a short list of the basics. We had to be specific. An example would be, “A man who has a calm temperament and handles stress well.” This may sound silly, but the reason it is important to put the important qualities you desire into writing is to hold you accountable. It also gives you heightened discernment in dating situations.

Just like character is the most important characteristic of a good guy, the woman you’re going to marry should have good character as well. When you find her, she is more valuable than anything. Here are 10 qualities of good future wife material: