Day to day diary of a 40 year old working mother. Recipes, ocassional attempts at humor, family photos.

Monday, April 04, 2011

What bothered me about labeling?

A short post, I am beat. I had DH tell PN and SR the news about his upcoming deployment. He had some photos of his last trip, and DH used those to tell the story. The kids were zapped, so they seemed ok with the news. We will see how it processes.

Summer activities for gifted kids. There are none if you have a dx of Asperger's. Sure you can pay for camp, and send child, but if the child requires help, or steps out of line. WHAP you are DONE, your money is kept, and boom OVER. If I had extra $$$ to try it, I would, but I do not. I even offered to send an adult with him, to make sure all is well....No.

There is a space camp, but holy crap, it is 1 week days only and almost a $1000. Uh, yeah.

I made several calls to camps. I started feeling like that Peanut's cartoon where snoopy keeps getting thrown out of places. "NO ASPERGER'S ALLOWED". Ughh. If he can behave normally, he can come. I wish I could gaurentee he would not flip out when it got loud, bright noisy...it does not happen often any longer, but I cannot gaurentee it.(I do not understand how I am supposed to teach him normal without him existing in normall?) He qualifies for Easter Seals, they do not have anything for him, he also qualifies for "reading recovery" since he has an IEP. He does not need reading recovery. His woodcock johnson scores, rated him at age 18 for his reading level.

I tried to be charming, I offered to send Grandma with him. Seriously tried. Like any good Momma Bear I got angry, and decided to take a different route. In good news SR's science mentor will be helping me make it through summer, he is now on the AWTM payroll. I am considering having the mentor help train him for a childrens triathalon as well as cobtinue with his science studies.

I am going to try a combo of robotics camp (pray to God he can hold it together, or I loose $$), it is one week, and 2 fun outdoor camps (which we could loose our $$ again) It is what it is, I am trying to get him to learn what normal looks and acts like, and he needs to be around it, to understand people, expectations, etc.

PN wants cooking camp, I found 2.

The kids will both have swim lessons, and piano. I need to keep providing new and interesting things for them.

I was so frustrated about the lack of service and will try my darndest to supplement and provide what he needs. A daunting process considering he is already better at Chemistry and genetics.

I have lined up a private tour of a foundry, his math mentor has a farm, and I am hoping to send the children out one day to help with chores. Perhaps they will learn a lot of amazing things.

I am still trying to find businesses that will give the children a private tour, of things I really think might amaze them.

6 comments:

Have you looked into a social skills camp? My 11yr is going to one (4hrs driving/day since it's an hour away... but we did it for speech camp and it's time...). It isn't just social skills but also camp... games, crafts, swimming etc.

Swimming lessons? Karate lessons help too. I wasn't convinced but we made it to the belt before green before we quit. We're missing the "I give a shit" gene as I like to call it. The "ok isn't good enough, you need to try harder" part is missing. We do it b/c it's been taught that way... nothing more, nothing less. But it helped a lot for listening and gross motor skills. I've heard many positives from those with HFA's and ADHD's... we have NLD.

We've been lucky living in a village and having a Scouting program here. They've taken him in, and worked with him too. He has the most "points" at the moment too - the one with the most points gets a prize at the end of the year. I doubt you'll get that kind of support - plus the Scout leader does respite if we need it - in a bigger center.

We tried general daycamp and sent a teenager with him when he was smaller.... Hated it. Too much down time. I find the busier the program, the happier and less behaviour there is.

That is so frustrating! It's like because he has Asberger's he has to be perfect all the time, but regular children have tantrums and act out too. I don't know what the problem is, especially if you offer to send an adult with him. I wish I had some advice to offer, but I do not. At least I will send some kind thoughts your way. -Emmie

A day trip to Grand Island will get you to the Hornady plant where he can walk through the bulletmaking factory. It is not loud, except the basement where they fire the rifles, testing the accuracy of the bullets, and that only when they are actually shooting. When I went through they were not shooting.

My Dad has this thing when we come visit that my kids need to be exposed to different things. One time he got hold of a dairy farm and we treked out to watch them during a milking. Your kids may have seen one, but it was fascinating.

I'll try to think of things I've taken my kids to see. It's been awhile. Right now, as we travel I try to hit 'historical'. It's not going over as big as I wish, but I don't care. I want them exposed. We're going graveyard stomping this summer. I may take paper and pencils and do some rubbings if we're allowed, of old ancestor's graves.

Hi! I just happened across your blog...I have a gifted 7 year-old who has ADHD and markers for Aspergers, although not formally diagnosed. I also stress about spending money on camps that he may just decide he hates and refuse to go back to. Sigh. Just thought I'd let you know there are others in the same boat. Not to mention the fact that everything costs a gazillion dollars and I don't have the $$ in the first place!

Just stumbled on your blog thru Hoagies fb. I have a (now 19 yr old) like your little Dash was: reading by age 2, asking about algebra, the concept of logos etc. But very easily "de-railed". It was a patchwork, no one fit, but one thing we did was connect with home-school groups and piggy backed their activities (tours, seminars, art projects). That way I could tag along. And they were friendly to moms with babies in tow. Sometimes I organized visits he was interested in. (Though when he was screeching and kicking my car seat because I wouldn't go into an oncologist's office and ask what radioactive isotope they were using, I had to just endure the tantrum.) I worked freelance around the most difficult years. Then subject acceleration and grade skipping helped. Early admission to college was really the end of the rainbow (though, again, didn't solve everything). I wish I had been better at building a community for them, we were so stressed a lot of the time, that I just circled the wagons around our little clan. I think my husband and I are a bit asbergerish ourselves! So be sure to create a community, find some other mothers you can be vulnerable and tired-and-everything-else around. Have you read "Parenting from the Heart" (Jack Pransky) or Elaine Aron's books? ( Her website is www.hsperson.com ) Good, good luck.