Classrooms aim to build community, cultivate kindness

Leena Efhaymi thinks being kind to just one person could be the key to world peace.

The Sanford Elementary 10-year-old said when people are mean, it starts a chain of events causing others to be mean, too.

"If the entire world learned how to be kind, it would be a much better place," she said.

The lesson is one educators at the Newport News school hoped to instill in students when they integrated citizenship skills in the third-grade curriculum last year. Efhaymi was part of the first class to participate in the program, and this year it's expanded to her fourth-grade classroom.

Following last month's Newtown, Conn., shootings, some said the country is becoming more violent, and if people learned kindness and compassion, future tragedies could be prevented. Local educators said they think kindness is a skill that can be learned – like math and science – and they think teaching it might help curb violent behaviors.

"If you're connected to your school and community, when something happens, it hurts you because you feel connected," said Sanford third-grade teacher Erica Wray. "You're not going to hurt someone you're connected to."

Wray said modeling positive behaviors, encouraging kids to communicate and reinforcing citizenship skills daily is key to making those connections and cultivating kindness.

Wray's third-graders gathered in a circle on a carpet in the back of the classroom one recent Thursday afternoon to talk about positive changes they can make in their school community. Wray stood by as a moderator, allowing students to lead the discussions.

"What are we proud of?" leader for the day Leianna Gallego, 9, asked her classmates.

Hands popped up, and one-by-one students highlighted accomplishments, such as learning to share and academic success.

She followed by asking if anyone had any concerns and "What can we do better?"

"I think we should do better at math and stop shouting out at people," 9-year-old classmate Lavie Tran said.

This daily meeting, Wray said, gives students time to talk about what's important to them. She said through discussing concerns about individual students or issues that affect the entire classroom, they use problem-solving skills to come up with peaceful resolutions. The time is also used to discuss community service projects—another important element to the program.

They're making plans to start a garden, and the third-graders decided when the food grows, they'd like to donate it. Fourth-graders have a relationship with residents at the Hidenwood Retirement Community, where they visit to put on performances and send crafts and letters.

The practice of integrating citizenship or character education in the classroom is growing on the Peninsula and across the country, said Ragen Johnson, program coordinator at Alternatives Inc. in Hampton.

Johnson said her organization, which works with educators to teach social skills, is currently in 104 local classrooms in Hampton, Newport News, Poquoson, York and Williamsburg-James City County.

"It's spreading here on the Peninsula," she said.

Johnson said the program aims to build and reinforce behaviors such as accepting differences, sharing, avoiding conflict and expressing feelings. Johnson said it's important for schools to offer these skills because kids don't always have positive role models at home.

"The more resources you have to help you, the better," she said.

Wray said teaching the skills at school may actually be more beneficial since kids often listen to peers before they will listen to adults.

Mason Yeamans, 9, another third-grader in Wray's class, said he gets angry and disappointed when other kids aren't nice to him. He hopes pressuring his peers by "killing them with niceness," will teach them to be kind to others.