The real Alliance badass

Some Alliance players keep whining that they don't have a badass pop-idol character. I've got to disagree. There's plenty badass Alliance characters, but most awesome of them is easily...

[Tirion's Retarded Voice]: Bolvar!

Yes, Bolvar. He's yet to show how really awesome he is. ICC was merely a setback, you know. There are more to come. He's pretty much Jack of all trades.

For example, the Black Temple!

Akama: Without it's master's command, the Illidari will become an even greater threat to this world. Control must be maintained... There must always be... [dramatic fel lightning] a Lord of Outland!
Maiev: The weight of such a Burden... it must be mine! For I need job now anywa-
Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the living can no longer comfort me. Place the horns upon my head, Maiev. Forevermore - I will be the Lord of Outland.
Akama: What the heck are you doing here?!
Bolvar: Icecrown is nice and all, but I heard there are concubines here!
Tirion: [shocked] Bolvar... by all that is holy...
Bolvar Fordragon: Tell them only that they are not prepared...
Bolvar Fordragon: and that Bolvar Fordragon is on vacation...
Maiev: But...
Bolvar Fordragon: [/flirts at Mother Shahraz] NOW GO. LEAVE THIS PLACE – AND NEVER RETURN.

Or even the Deadmines!
Edwin VanCleef: I see... only darkness... before... me... [dies]
Cookie: Murglemurgle gurglerwlrgle grlgrlgrl rwlmrwl. Mrglgrgl rwrgl. Grgrgl mrgl... [dramatic sound of thunder from outside the cove] ... rwl Murglegurgle!
Vanessa VanCleef: The weight of such a burden... it must be mine. For I'm his daugh-
Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the legal can no longer comfort me. Place the mask upon my head, Vanessa. Forevermore - I will be the Defias Kingpin.
Vanessa VanCleef: Uh oh I can't, it says Classes: Rogue.
Bolvar Fordragon: Dammit.

Or just random kobold encounter!

Kobold: The weight of such a candle... it must be mine! For I take can-
Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the lore characters can no longer comfort me. Place the candle upon my head, random kobold. Forevermore - I will be-
Kobold: You no take candle!

Thrall: Garrosh Hellscream, you are to lead the Horde to victory in my stead.Garrosh Hellscream: The weight of such a Burden... it must be mine-Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the living can no longer comfort me.
Place the Doomhammer in my hand, Garrosh. Forevermore - I will be the Warchief of the Horde.Garrosh Hellscream: By my right as Warchief, I hereby relieve you of duty.Garrosh Hellscream: YOU ARE DISMISSED.

Terenas: There must always be...a Lich King.
Tirion: The weight of such a burden, it must be mi-
Kanye: Yo, Tirion, I'm happy for you and imma let you finish but Kil'jaeden had one of the most-
Bolvar: Kanye! You hold an extremely outdated meme in your hands, bro'. The dragons' flame sealed my chance at being a serious lore character. Place the shades upon my head, forevermore i will be the master of interrup-
Darth Vader: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Thrall: Garrosh Hellscream, you are to lead the Horde to victory in my stead.Garrosh Hellscream: The weight of such a Burden... it must be mine-Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the living can no longer comfort me.
Place the Doomhammer in my hand, Garrosh. Forevermore - I will be the Warchief of the Horde.Garrosh Hellscream: By my right as Warchief, I hereby relieve you of duty.Garrosh Hellscream: YOU ARE DISMISSED.

5 minutes later...

Garrosh's head is impaled on a pike and Bolvar is dual wielding Doomhammer AND Gorehound.

some alliance players keep whining that they don't have a badass pop-idol character. I wholeheartly disagree. There are a lot of badass alliance characters, but most awesome of them is easily...

[tirion's retarded voice]: Bolvar!

Yes, bolvar. He's yet to show how really awesome he is. Icc was merely a setback, you know. There are more to come. He's pretty much jack of all trades.

For example, the black temple!

Akama: Without it's master's command, the illidari will become an even greater threat to this world. Control must be maintained... There must always be... [dramatic fel lightning] a lord of outland!
Maiev: The weight of such a burden... It must be mine! For i need job now anywa-
bolvar fordragon: The dragons' flame... Sealed my fate. The world of the living can no longer comfort me. Place the horns upon my head, maiev. Forevermore - i will be the lord of outland.
Akama: What the heck are you doing here?!
Bolvar: Icecrown is nice and all, but i heard there are concubines here!
Tirion: [shocked] bolvar... By all that is holy...
Bolvar fordragon: Tell them only that they are not prepared...
Bolvar fordragon: And that bolvar fordragon is on vacation...
Maiev: But...
Bolvar fordragon: [/flirts at mother shahraz] now go. Leave this place – and never return.

Or even the deadmines!
Edwin vancleef: I see... Only darkness... Before... Me... [dies]
cookie: Murglemurgle gurglerwlrgle grlgrlgrl rwlmrwl. Mrglgrgl rwrgl. Grgrgl mrgl... [dramatic sound of thunder from outside the cove] ... Rwl murglegurgle!
Vanessa vancleef: The weight of such a burden... It must be mine. For i'm his daugh-
bolvar fordragon: The dragons' flame... Sealed my fate. The world of the legal can no longer comfort me. Place the mask upon my head, vanessa. Forevermore - i will be the defias kingpin.
Vanessa vancleef: Uh oh i can't, it says classes: Rogue.
Bolvar fordragon: Dammit.

Or just random kobold encounter!

Kobold: The weight of such a candle... It must be mine! For i take can-
bolvar fordragon: The dragons' flame... Sealed my fate. The world of the lore characters can no longer comfort me. Place the candle upon my head, random kobold. Forevermore - i will be-
kobold: You no take candle!

Alexstraza: Without its master, the black dragonflight will become an even greater threat! Control must be maintained...there must always be...[dramatic earthquake] a giant douche of a dragon!
Ysera: Such a burden, it must be mine! I need a unique model anyway!
Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the non scaly can no longer comfort me. Place the chin upon my face, Alex. Forevermore - I will be the Lord of black dragons.
And then Bolvar was Deathwing.

"Care about 'er? I love her! I'd kill everyone in the world and myself if she wanted it!"

I hate to ruin the "funny" factor of this thread (though I honestly didn't find it funny at all. That could just be because I'm tired, though, so I won't judge), but Bolvar isn't an Alliance hero anymore.

We truly don't have anymore, sans faction leaders and Turalyon...who will probably be neutral.

Alexstraza: Without its master, the black dragonflight will become an even greater threat! Control must be maintained...there must always be...[dramatic earthquake] a giant douche of a dragon!
Ysera: Such a burden, it must be mine! I need a unique model anyway!
Bolvar Fordragon: The dragons' flame... sealed my fate. The world of the non scaly can no longer comfort me. Place the chin upon my face, Alex. Forevermore - I will be the Lord of black dragons.
And then Bolvar was Deathwing.

Troll King: I see... only bans... before... me *dies*Random Troll: Without our master's command, the restless trolls will become an even lesser treat to the forums. Control must not be maintain... There must always be... *A lighting strikes at the background as a man is hitted by it* a Troll King!Prince Troll: The honor of such a glory... it must be mine, for there is no oth-Bolvar Fordragon: The ban's flame... sealed my fate. The world of the moderators can no longer comfort me. Place the avatar on my account, Troll. Forevermore, I will be the the king of the trolls!Bolvar Fordragon: Now go! Troll the forums... and keep trolling!

My turn!
Stormwind citisen[random]: Without its King, stormwind will become an even greater mess! Control must be maintained...there must allways be.... [deathwing comes and incinerates park] a king
Anduin Wrynn:The Weight of such a burden...it must be mine! For there is no other t---
Bolvar Fordragon:The dragons' flame sealed my fate....the world of the chill can no longer confort me. Place the crown on my head, Archbishop *insert his name here* forevermore- i will be the stormwind's king, BECAUSE U ARE NOT OVER 18 YEARS, ANDUIN! NOW GO! LEAVE THIS PLACE, AND NEVER RETURN!
Anduin: FFFFFFFFFUU
Stormwind people: Wait...what? Didnt u were regent lord once?
Bolvar: I MUST be forgotten *cough* my former self MUST be forgotten, forevermore, for second time, i am THE LKING (maybe a typo, maybe not ; ) )!