Thursday, April 30, 2009

!m feelin real good today, hope that means its a start to a good weekend for me. we are leaving for west virginia at 4 am and i have to admitt im getting excited. just really looking foward to getting away, i no i get out once in awhile for karaoke but thats just not the same lol.

walmart called today and said my glasses or in so im going to get them in a bit, my eye test went good, im not as blind as i thought! my right eye is alot worse than my left though. but oh well, i picked out a modern pair of frames and hope i like them as much as i did that day when i looked at them.

i think today is going so good for me because i called my dad to tell him i love him and that i was leaving for my trip shortley, he goes to bed around 6 so i had to call him early to say bye lol . he told me he loved me and then i talked to my sister that i dont talk to much and we had a heart to heart today and for once finally exspressed how we were feelin about things.i feel so much better now because iv always wanted a relationship with her but it just wasnt there and i guess with this whole thing going on with my dad peoples feelings change and gets you thinking and we decided to put the past in the past and focus on the future and it feels good!

oh and my new couches came in but i wont be here to get them, they wanted to deliver this weekend. so i will have to wait till next weekend. i guess i can live with that lol!

im gonna try to take some pics on my new camera i got, i heard at nite its really beautiful on the mountain. well im off here, gotta start packing, i always wait till the last minute to do everything "sigh" , will be back sunday hopefully! hope everyone has a great weekend. hugs

Monday, April 27, 2009

Hello,its a beautiful , HOT day here! the bummbel bee's were trying to run me off my porch this morning. i wait on the porch to see my son off to school on the bus but there was so many bee's they were freaking me out! im a just alittle scared of em! they decided to build a nest somewhere and make home but they gotta go. i called bf and told him youve gotta do something because i cant deal with bee's wizzing by my head lol.

Had a good weekend, really didnt do to much because it was just to darn hot! saterday nite went to a friends house for drinks and i had 4 wine coolers and all it did to me was make tired lol. i guess i cant hang like i use too. use to be able to drink couple beers or something and get drunk but now i just get tired :P dont need to get drunk though to have fun. today was my fathers stress test, i hope it went or is going good. im not sure what time his appt was, my sister is suppose to call me and let me no how things went.

im going to the eye drs tomm at walmart and lets see how blind iv become. i normally wear glasses now to read or drive at nite, but iv been needing them to watch tv so that its not so blurry. i dont like the glasses i have now, dont like the frames. so im excited to pick a new pair that i will be comfortable wearing at any time.

im getting excited about this friday, its D Day, i go camping in west virginia. im still not to kean on the camping part even if its in a camping trailer, just looking forward to getting away. theres 10 of us going i believe and we are leaving 4am friday mornin. so ill be sleeping alot of the way there im sure lol its 6hrs away. well not much more to say, hope everyone is having a good day.heres a link to a song i recorded. janie got me addicted to this now, so i had to try it out. hugshttp://www.singsnap.com/snap/r/bf11a1195

Thursday, April 23, 2009

"Sigh" im just in a quite mood right now as it feels my mind is racing a mile a minute.

found out yesterday that my dad isnt doing to good, you cant tell by lookin at him thats for sure and thats whats so scary! my sister dragged him to the drs because he hates drs, gee wonder where i get that from......... she took him to the eye drs last week because he just cant see that good and so he let her take him and it was no good news. hes got bleeding behind his eyes and thats from being diabetic and not taking care of it and ignoring it like everything else. so then went to regular dr ysterday and they checked him over and did ekg and he was told that hes had a heart attack at some point and has had a stroke and hes got a clogged artery somewheres, high blood pressure, high cholestrol,so next week hes gotta get a stress test done.

im trying not to worry about this and just pray that he gets himself all taken care of and he will be fine but............ you cant make someone take care of them selves who dont want to. hes so stubbern and set in his ways, always thinks that it will just go away, you'll get over it etc etc. to this day he still doesnt understand my disease and thinks it will just poof go away and tells me i just need to exercise, move around. well daddy your exercising and lifting weights and how great of shape you think your in your not, your falling apart! so im not suppose to let him no i no anything , he doesnt want anyone to no but of course my sis told me, thank god! i mean his kids should no whats going on hes are only father.

when i talked to him ysterday on the phone and it was a nice conversation he told me he loved couple times and when i got off the phone reality set in that this is some serouis stuff, hes a ticking time bomb and just doesnt get it! i dont want to loose him , we may not have always gotten along but hes always been there for me and a great father and i dont no what id do without him. i think alot of times when bad things happen i just try not to think about it so maybe i dont have to face it, maybe its from being a kid watching my mom slowley die, i dont no but i cant hide from this and neither can he. hes 68 yrs old and needs to be around for along time! sorry this post is a downer but iv just got alot on my mind. hope everyone has a good day! hugs

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Well what to say what to say hmmmmmm........the weathers been pretty nice around here except for the rain showers, could do without that!had to go to baltimore on monday to see a specialist and that was a nightmare for me lets just leave it at that but thank god its over!

i got a letter in the mail and iv been picked for jury duty. now some of you this would be fun or whatever lol but not to me, im trying to get out of it. this brings on anxiety real bad lol, i really do hope i can get out of it at this time!

i do have some fun things coming up soon wich im excited about. going over a friends house saterday for some drinks and catching up so i hope it turns out good and next friday may 1st going to west virginia with some family to go camping! now camping isnt really my thing but they want me to go so i figure going for the weekend wont kill me, i wont be sleeping in a tent i will be sleeping in a camping trailer thank god! im just looking forward to being in the open woods, field whatever you wanna call it and enjoying the senery and fire etc. i hope i make it back without getting eatin by a grizzy bear lol. they told me you hear all the animals at nite, that really makes me feel good.............um what else what else?????? when i wait to long to write i forget all i had to say dang it! been busy here trying to get rid of stuff, cleaning out the house and giving on freecycle. but again freecyle just really irritates me with some of the greedy a$$ people on there, i wont go any further it will just make me mad. i hope everyones week is going good and have a good day. tata

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Hello Hello,its been awhile since i wrote but really nothing new going on i dont think. its a beautiful day here and in the 60's or its suppose to be, i havent been out yet. im meeting a girl off here today shes coming by to get some books i have, so hopefully that meeting goes well. im always nervous meeting someone new but hey you gotta do it sometime.

iv got such bad heartburn and a raging headache , i think ill survive, i hope!

iv got alot of drs appts this month, not my thing. i have to see regular dr tomm to fill out paperwork, then next week to see specialist then week after that have to drive to baltimore to see another specialist ugh! im swelling up so bad and gaining alot of weight and just HATE IT! with my illness i always swell but its been so much worse since i was put on a pill once a week for my bones amonth ago. why cant i fight one battle at a time instead of dealing with my weight too! my sister is finally talking to me and we hashed out everything and im happy, one thing less to stress about. one really exciting thing in my life is we are getting new couches, yay me! never had new furniture always buy used and are couch was functional but seeing better days so we had a screw it moment one day and went and looked at couches and bought a reclining sofa and reclining loveseat. now my problem is the waiting, they said like 4, 6 weeks!!!!!! i hate waiting on things youve already payed for, but i no it will be worth it!

i live in a duplex and come to find out my neighbors are moving sometime soon, not real happy about that. i mean we didnt talk much it was a young girl who lives there shes 27 and her husband whos gone all the time but she really keeps to herself alot. thats nice but then would like someone to move in who i could hang out with or form some relationship with since im home all the time! she was or is a little crazy or maybe thats not nice to say but i use to order avon from her and then one day around christmas she just stopped selling to me and hasnt talked to me since, i dont even no what i did wrong, talks to my bf though. then they say they are moving because someone at nite when they let the dogs out are pointing them red pointer lights at them and throwing rocks, peeking in the windows etc . say what! iv never heard of such a thing, iv lived here for almost 4 yrs and never have had a problem so far thank god! but she is bypolar and stuff so who no's. hopefully its not really true cause i dont wanna start being scared living here.going to karaoke with my friend this saterday from 4-8 and it will be the first time going out without boyfriend, everywhere i go he goes but it will be nice for him to do his own thing and me do my thang. no plans for easter unfortuanally, it will just be another day around here wich is sad! wish i could get my family together but that aint gonna happen. well gonna quit ranting and do some laundry. hope everyone has a great day and wonderful easter! hugs

About Me

Im 30, im shy but outspoken. i have a boyfriend of 7yrs, a 6yr old son and a cat named lola and puppy gummybear. I was diagnosed with polymyositis/muscle disease in August "08 and am in treatment. Little by little im getting better and hope to one day be my normal self again or as close to it. I also am trying to loose weight for what seems like will be the rest of life but im no quitter!Thank you for stopping by!