Sunday, February 21, 2010

Environmental Raaacism

You'll be forgiven for thinking I took my rat tail combs and headed off to do hair in Galt's Gulch, given the quietness in these parts, Christians, but you all know how relentlessly oppressive life has become under the despotic reign of Barack Hussein Obama. I was terrified to wish you all so much as a "Merry Christmas" lest Ayatollah Pelosi's stormtroopers kick down my door and drag me off to their re-education camps. But if anything will force me to raise my voice in opposition, it's more of The Left's staggering hypocrisy.

The Environmental Protection Agency on Sunday unveiled a five-year, $475-million plan to revitalize the Great Lakes, including cleaning up polluted water and beaches, restoring wetlands and fighting invasive species such as Asian carp.

Federal and state officials call the effort, dubbed the Great Lakes Restoration Initiative Action Plan, "historically unprecedented" in size, funding and coordination between various branches of government.

I want my country back! This is nothing short of Socialism! With a pinch of Nazism! Slow-cooked in Leon Trotsky's crockpot! Served over a steaming bed of Chairman Mao's white rice!

And pardon me for asking this, but where are the race pimps to pander on behalf of the Asian carp now? After all, they're only eating the algae American carp can't bother themselves to eat, their apologists would presumably say... and it's just a matter of time before they begin outperforming our native-born fish in standardized math & science tests. But we should know better than to expect the civil rights lobby to be ideologically consistent. God forbid they hold the Democrat Party accountable for their blatant racism, particularly when there's always some trumped-up opportunity to bash Republicans. I guess it's too much to expect those small minds perpetually consumed by hatred to recognize the many recent advances the Republican Party has made to the cause of civil rights, but maybe once we regain our legislative majorities (though I suppose we already have), we can resume passing the sort of bills that show our deep compassion for all God's children. Praise Him!