Tucker’s Room

The 7th floor. It was a contradiction of space. At Presbyterian Hemby Children’s Hospital, there are only 2 reasons you go to the 7th floor. The first is because you are excitedly awaiting news of the birth of a healthy, full term baby just one floor up. The other reason you go to the 7th floor is because you have a critically ill and very fragile baby in the NICU.

In that one space, the shared waiting area, the emotions laid forth are almost bi-polar. On one couch sits a family with pink balloons and flowers, giddy and expressive, joyfully taking turns guessing hair color and weight of the impending healthy baby. On the couch right next to them is a family worn and devastated, trying to quietly call family to update them about the life saving surgery that is minutes away for their 2 pound fragile baby.

Yet, this is the only space for both families to wait. If your baby is in the NICU, you go there often. To make phone calls, or quickly eat a snack or wait to return to the NICU because of the 2 person-at-the-bedside rule. There were times when we would show up for our Tucker visit and our pod was closed. Closed because there was a baby that was so sick, so fragile, that he couldn’t be moved to an operating room. When that happens, they close the unit, sterilize the pod, and perform surgery right there at the bedside. So we would wait. And so would the family of the baby getting surgery, ragged with worry, getting updates from the doctors. Amongst the flowers and balloons and joy.

There are so many times that a NICU mom or dad just needs a place. A place to collect themselves. A place to pray privately. A place to weep without trying to hide tears that have threatened all day. A place to make calls to family, updating about triumphs and setbacks. A place to find a moment of peace from the monitors, alarms, tubes and chaos. A place to bring the siblings of your NICU baby. A place to wait while you hold your breath for the 90 minute surgery that is the only option to save your baby’s life. A couch to rest and grab a much needed midnight cup of coffee.

But mostly, mamas and daddies need a place to sit, pause, and summon up the hope they need to walk back through those NICU doors.

Today that place, the one so desperately needed, opened. On the 7th floor of Hemby Children’s Hospital, right outside the NICU, there is a door. It opens to a room, set aside only for families with babies in the NICU. The room houses comfy couches, a TV, a coffee maker, a kids area for siblings and resources for families. The room was graciously given by Speedway Children’s Charity who provided a $100,000 grant to Hemby Children’s Hospital. Please check them out, there is likely a chapter in your area and they do tremendous stuff. I have been on their board for 4 years now and have seen some amazing work. They provide grants to as many children’s charities in their local area as they can. The Charlotte chapter gave out 55 grants this year. Amazing. This specific gift for the NICU provided funding for 3 new much needed isolettes for the NICU and the construction of this new NICU Family Waiting Room.

And the sweetest part for our family, is that the new NICU Family Room will be named…Tucker’s Room.

We cannot connect letters, to form words, to make sentences, to sufficiently tell you how much this means for Team Hucks, but also for how much it will mean to the many NICU families after us. It will be a place of rest, a place to refill your well. There will be a book that provides stories of hope from previous NICU graduates. Families of past NICU families will be able to leave food in honor of their former mighty preemie. It will be a place for families to connect, sharing similar circumstance and milestones.

So, we broke Tucker out of isolation for this one, special occasion (don’t worry, Lysol and hand sanitizer were arm’s reach). To celebrate with friends, doctors, former NICU grads and hospital staff this room that will be a haven for weary NICU families. It was a big day for us, for sure. But it was a huge day for the families yet to come. Our prayer is that they would find peace, respite and a big measure of hope in this room that was named after Tucker, but that represents every story that has come forth from that NICU. Thank you Speedway Children’s Charities and Novant Health. What. A. Day.

Comments

So happy to hear that you and your family are doing well. My son recently started a charity to help with families that have babies in the NICU. My daughter, Mirabella was born a preemie as well. We currently work with Hemby Hospital providing care packages containing baby blankets; preemie hats as well as other items for the babies and families. We are so honored to help and would love to connect with you to see if you had any additional ideas of what we could provide or ways that we could contribute. My daughter is now 11 years old but the memories bring us back as though it was yesterday. warmest regards, michelle

Hi Heather,
I just found your blog thru the Micro Preemie Network on Facebook. I’ve only read a little so far, but it’s wonderful. I look forward to following your family and your journey. I, myself, have 25 week twins, who are now 19 months. I also have started a blog as part of the healing process. If you have a chance to check it out, I would appreciate it. Thanks for sharing your experiences!

Hi Shann, thanks for commenting. I looked at your blog-your boys are adorable! Our kids are very close in age so its great to connect on some shared experiences. Hope you guys have a wonderful Christmas!

Heather, thank you for everything you have done and continue to do everyday as you continue to focus on the needs of others. The ribbon cutting ceremony brought tears to my eyes. Mary Jo Clark’s kind words and prayer were also so moving. Have a blessed Holiday! -Lynn

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Who Is This Rookie?

I don't trust people who don't like sweets. Monica Gellar is my spirit animal. I work. I write. I mom. I pray. I wife. I eat. I go. First kid was born at 24 weeks and spent 151 days in the NICU-well that didn't go as planned. He fought and we cheered. I started writing during that time. Second kid was born on a Thursday night-her birthmom's hand in mine both of us crying happy tears. You'll find posts here about cheesecake, adoption, kindergarten shenanigans, hard stuff, Dolly Parton and whatever else I want. And you'll like it young lady. Thanks for reading. I always love adding to the team. Especially if you bring team snacks.