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i cant think too far ahead yet, if i start thinking of the next scan i know i will get bad news tomorrow.
but it is on my mind about a further scan
if there IS a normal pregnancy inside there will be no heartbeat at this stage so i would need to return anyway.

i just hope n pray there is something real there, and not a molar or in a tube

im tempted to poas the digital CB, but i may wait till next week, dont wanna waste it and would love to see 3+
im only just 6w tomorrow but with the low and late hcg numbers i may only be just over 5 weeks
urgh why is nothing certain in life!!!

hope you have a nice time with your parents. i doubt i could have mine stay over (aside from the fact they only live 10mins drive away) as im too like my dad and we clash .
love em to pieces tho.

how are you with warmth?
im roasting!!! at night i get all hot n sweaty these days! i slept with my housecoat over me last night n was cosy warm!
my flat is roasting as dad n df wired up the living room heater and it is belting out heat, im sat in light trackys n a vest top!

Was dying to get on all day today to see if there was any updates but was so busy I couldn't get on. Just take one day at a time hon. What time is your scan? Gosh I feel like I'm going, feel all excited and nervous for you! I think by now you really would have known if it was molar or ectopic.

I know the uncertainty is so hard, just have to leave it in the lap of the gods and hope for the best.

Had a nice time with my parents and seeing them again on Saturday. We're going up north to help them strip carpets. Well I'm not, I will be making the dinner and they will do the diy!

im in for 10am
the nurse said something about needing to have me in when a doctor is around, i think thats in case things arent going well. so i assume the nurses do all the scanning like they do at stimms. if theres a problem they would then call a doctor.
oh im getting nervous!
not long till true blood is on then i can crawl to bed

i went to my gp today and asked his advise re going to work. he said i should self certify then take it from there. if there is a prob he will then sign me off.
if all is well tomorrow i can phone up to book an appointment to meet the midwife as she visits on wednesdays down here!

spoke to my manager and she advised me to call HR and see my GP. she later called to say she knew of a sister childrens unit that has delt with 2 preg ladies. one lass "moved on" and the other is currently "working from home"
apparently there is a risk assessment procedure they must follow and she read out the things i cant do or be subjected to. so basically i could maybe blow my nose and go to the loo whilst at work! gawd im preg n just dont wanna be involved in a restraint or too stressfull a situation. it seems i wont be able to do any hands on work or even use the bloomin photocopier!! ffs!!
tho they cant start this process till i inform them in writing.
so im planning to go to work tomorrow, work the weekend then on shift on monday am i will have it in writing- if the scan tomorrow goes ok.

i wish i was cooler!

will let you know asap how i get on, but if it aint good news then i doubt i will be on. so if you havnt had an update by 1pm it went bad.

oooh carpet stripping! i had great fun sitting with a stanley cutting a carpet into wee bits! very therapeautic but better to observe and direct lol

That is great news hon! I'm so pleased for you! I know it feels like there is still a long way to go but it's one step closer! Hang in there and take it easy. Fingers crossed rolo has grown a bit by next wk!

YAY!!! That's great! Hope lo is carrying on growing nice and strong! How is the spotting going. I have heard of people that have spotted right up to the 2nd trimester and had healthy los.

Not long till the 11th at all which is just making me more and more scared! Partly at the thought of there being nothing there and partly at the thought of there being something there and this actually happening for real! Which makes me excited but scared as well!

I reckon they will still give you the scan just to check that all is ok.

tiz friday at 10am again with dr medina, she is very calming
as for the spotting i darent comment too much as ive had the calm before the storm before, just when i thought all was gonna be fine it was bang m/c . its slowed for the moment, but im still KC every 30mins or so!

any more symptoms yet?
have you got enough progesterone till scan? im running out of the syringes and needles for the gestone, hopefully there will be a need to get more on friday. urgh that reminds me its 2x jabby times today *sigh* if it helps lil rolo stay sticky i will grit my teeth n bear it.

Shirlz, I've done it the other way round to you - posted the BFP and then found my way here! Read some of the posts between you and they made me giggle - just what I need - so thought I'd come and join in.

Had a miscarriage after a natural BFP in 2008 and zilch since....until now. 1st go at IVF and I'm due for my HCG blood test tomorrow at 16 days post 5dt. Thought that BFP would make me really happy, well it does, except that I'm climbing the walls, worrying it might disappear! Can't take my mind off it. On the funny side, keep surreptitiously feeling my boobs when I think no-one is looking, just to see if they're feeling sore. Realised I must look like the blokes who scratch their bits when they think no-one is looking! Well, the test tomorrow should give an indication of whether it is progressing as it should (a CB digital this morning said 2-3 weeks - that should be about right, maybe should be ticking over to 3+ soon though...). Still on clexane (massive big bruise on my stomach from the injections!), aspirin and those pessaries so reckon it might be difficult to spot symptoms - especially CM!

im just petrified my spotting is bad news and till friday im not posting a thread about my bfp-

hope your hcg today is high and everything else is well. it should be nice and high as you are 21 days past ec/fertilisation

my tummy "bruise" has faded quite a bit now thankfully, think my body is getting used to the drug (it is a blood thinner isnt it?) for the first 2 weeks it was just one whole black bruise! now it is mostly yellow with loads of red pinpricks! oh the things we need to do!
im not on the pessaries, im on the gestone jabs every 2 days, but i have been taking one pessary every now n then when i think the gestone is running out.

Shirlz - I shall remember to keep everything crossed for Friday! I think Dr Medina was the one I had for my very first appt. Is she slight, small with shoulder length dark hair? Bruising sounds lovely! I have enough progesterone to take me just past the scan date. My next tricky bit will be that if all is ok :fingerscrossed: then will have to see if they will let me keep going until the 12wk scan, just to reassure me. But they might say that my GP will have to prescribe it for me. Will see. Let's get to that heartbeat first! No more real symptoms yet. On and off feel a bit sicky but still can't decide if it's my mind telling me I should or real ms! I actually keep needing to burp or yawn and when I do I gag every time. Not nice!

Well can't believe it's 7 wks today. just over a week to go and we will know where we stand with it all. They had a thing on the news this morning about mc and how having one didn't make it more likely for you to have another one and I found myself getting really upset about it all and scared about it happening again. I just so want to see that little heartbeat next week.

Please be sticky and growing little one! mummy and daddy so want to meet you in the summer!!

Jxx

Nov 09 ICSI
Feb'10 IUI 1,Apr'10 IUI 2 MMC 9wks.Oct'10 IUI 3

This post has been edited 2 times, last edit by "Julz" (Nov 2nd 2010, 7:13pm)

Well, sicky feelings sound good Julz. And 7 weeks gone already! That's great. Will be thinking of you in this last week's wait.

And Shirlz, I know what you mean about not posting. Feels like tempting fate doesn't it. Really hope the spotting is just one of those things that goes away as time moves on.

I'm meant to be on the Clexane for another 2 weeks and the progesterone too. They did my blood test this morning, gave me my drugs, booked my scan for two weeks and then said they would call tonight to confirm the HCG results. It's twenty past eight and no call. Was focusing so much on getting to today's test to get some reassurance. Now I'm reading into why they might not have called - because there's a problem? or because they don't need to because it's all on track? Don't think they realise their little administrative mistakes play with our minds! Am convinced my boobs have gone down but will just have to call first thing in the morning and see if I can get hold of someone. And worse, DH is away in Germany with work tonight. Just got home to an empty house. Oh for a large glass of red wine.....Aghhhhhhhh!!!!....Hang on, 20.25 and in comes the call from the clinic!!! HCG 4322. Progesterone 122. They seem happy with that. Still think it's time for that glass of wine!!!!!!!!!!!!!

omg harry your hcg is whopping!
i think you n julz are onto more than one LO sticking n growing!

julz i think thats her, dr medina. she did my 1st ET and 4th ET- and what has happened both times she did the transfer................
when i had the good news that my bloods had doubled the 1st time the nurses were chatting about my progesterone support and i heard one saying "dr lyall wants her to stay on it for a while/longer" so i hope it means till 12 weeks. if not then i hope my gp will prescribe. he did say to return if there was anything he could do to help with signing me off if the clinic advise anything.
if they wont help me then i have loads of progesterone pessaries- enough for you and i to have an additional 2 weeks+ worth

i cant believe thats another week past! you are 1 week ahead of me, im just 6 weeks now (well 6w1d to be precise so i hope to get past 11pm with no severe bleeding as thats what happened last time) will be a milestone passed for me!
i hope it is MS for you!!! i would give anything to be bent over the porceline every day, at least then you know things are going well!!

harry did they tell you what the clexane is for? ive never really been told!

mid shift at wprk for me tomorrow and i hope the manager has got the risk assessment forms for us to go thru. i will be playing the M/C history card in the hope that it means i can stay off till 12 weeks, or even 8 weeks i would be happy with. i dislike moving far from the sofa right now in case i over do it!
but if i cant get let off work i may have to go off sick. im a late shift on thirsday and that suits me, would need to swap a shift on friday as im ment to be early but as im to be at GRI for 10am theres really no point me doing the shift as i will be out for most of it. wish i knew how the assessment will go, its stressing me out!!!

night ladies i have ebay selling stuff to organise and prepare for posting!

why is this never easy????
had a scare this morning when the spotting went from brown to red.
have been crapping myself ever since.
went to work and spoke to my manager and advised her that i will be self cert as of tomorrow. cant take the aditional pressure of work stress as well as the stress of the spotting

Shirlz -- UPDATING - JUST SAW YOUR NEW POST - hope it is all ok and nothing serious. Just take it easy and good thinking to just stay off, no risks worth taking right now. Everything crossed for you!
Original post - oh well, she must be lucky then!! lol at having enough pessaries for the both of us! I think I have enough for a week past next week or so and then will need another 3wks or so. My GP is really supportive so I'm sure she would prescribe it i I need it. Still haven't been to GP yet though! Might as well wait til next week now probably.

Well no sickyness today, seems to be coming and going. Hope the risk assessment went ok as well! Try not to stress over it, no stress allowed remember!

Shirlz, really hope the spotting is ok. When do you have a scan or tests due? Definitely good you're off work, phew, a chance to rest and give that little tadpole the best possible chance to dig in and stay sticky! You asked about Clexane. I wasn't really told either. Have read that it can help implantation but also that it might help immune issues with natural killer cells. Really not sure but I'll stick with the bruising for as long as it takes. Checked my information leaflet on Clexane when you asked - it didn't give any 'why's' but did say they normally have you taking it until the end of your 10th week!

Julz - the nurse at my clinic said that pg symptoms will do exactly that - the coming and going bit. Hang in there - you're 7 weeks in! That's fantastic!

AFM, no mega symptoms except for feeling exhausted all the time. I could sleep for 16 hours a day! Work is really c**p at the moment as I'm having to cover work for both my boss and their boss who are both off sick. Sit at my desk and just want to fall asleep! Never normally take a lunchbreak but went for a nice walk around the shops at lunchtime to try to wake myself up. Couldn't help looking wistfully at the maternity wear shop I passed, quite a trendy one ...getting ahead of myself. Will concentrate on shoes or handbags instead - feeling far too blobby after a couple of months of comfort eating and no exercise to face the normal clothes shops!

DH back tonight so looking forward to a cuddle and the apprentice! And a snooze!!!

woke up to bright red at 4am. clots started soon after and i got really faint and sicky feeling. had a bite of banana and some water and im just awaiting the hours to pass till i can get showered n dressed and get to clinic.

had hopes this would be it but i dared dream of june and a LO in my arms and yet again its going to just be a dream.

i know ladies can bleed and be fine, but this is just like last m/c and there will be no hope going by the flow. thanks karma/fate/luck for yet again dropping turds on me from a height.

I am absolutely gutted to read this hon. Words can't describe how upset I am for you. This is just so incredibly unfair. I am thinking of you and if there is anything at all that I can do just shout. You know we are here for you. Sending you big

home now and awaiting the hcg number, full blood count and date for repeat bloods.
ive lost such a lot of blood - at least i know if my body doesnt like something it can get rid of it pretty efficiantly, without being too graphic i doubt there is much left now.

julz n harry i wish you all the best. tiz time for me to leave this thread. i will keep a close eye on you two and hope both of you get fantastic scans in the next few weeks.

I can't say how sorry I am hon. There aren't enough words. I hate that this can be taken away from us so quickly. I really hope that your time comes soon hon and that your dreams come true. And you have to remember on the plus side you know it can happen and that is half the battle. Hang in there and look after yourself and as always if you need anything at all just shout and I am here for you.

Oh no. I can't believe it. I am so so sorry. Life is so unfair sometimes and things don't make sense. Wish there was something I could say to make you feel better and to comfort you. I will be thinking of you over the next few days and weeks.

I'm feeling like it's too long a wait until my scan! 1 week 1 day to go and hopefully that will go quickly. In laws came down at the weekend and mother in law had a stinking cold, now colleague I sit next to is complaining of a high temperature! Agghhhh - stay away people. I'd really love to curl up in bed and wake up next Tuesday! Mmm, sleep!

I know it is quiet, I've just been so busy. We have our scan tomorrow so pretty nervous as this is where is went wrong last time. Just oping that we get our miracle tomorrow. HOw are you feeling? How far along are you now?

good luck today julz
i will keep my eye out for your update
i cant wait to hear if it is one or 2 heartbeats! you are going to get your happy ever after huni, think ive kept the bad luck for the 3 of us

harry it isnt long till your scan and i hope you too get your happy ever after.

Well, after a long 4wks of waiting and wondering and poas and prodding at (.)(.) and worrying over a lack of symptoms we had our scan today. We got called in and told the normal, we will have a look and see what is there and do the measurements and don't worry if I don't say anything i'm just checking every thing first, at which point all the memories from last time came flooding back and I burst into tears. The nurse started crying, went in had a quick root around and before I knew it to put my mind at rest she showed us our beautiful baby and it's flickering heartbeat. She then turned it back and said, oh I'll just check to make sure there isn't another one and laughed, turned the screen back again to which I asked 'is that is again' and she said 'NO.... That's the other one!!!' OMG!!! THERE ARE TWO!!!! WE ARE HAVING TWINS!!!

We are in absolute shock and can't believe our luck! Twin 1 is measuring 8 wks exactly (I am 8+1) and twin 2 is slightly smaller at 7+3 but she said that it was quite curled up so was probably bigger and that it was normal for one to be slightly smaller anyway, so they aren't worried about it. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!!!

So we have to go see the GP tomorrow to get reffered to the Southern and to the twins clinic and they will probably give us a scan in a couple weeks. So fingers crossed they both continue to grow and all is ok but we are over the moon to say the very least. I have dreamt of having twins since I was a little girl so to say this is a dream come true is an understatement.

I just realy can't believe it. I really couldn't have imagined it!

Shirlz - they had to get Dr Deshpande in to check i was definitely two, she barely even looked at it and was like, oh yes, clearly two! It as nice actually cause she was the one that confirmed the mc so it was nice to have her confirm good news and feels a bit like we have come full circle. i think our angel has been looking down on us! There is still a long way to go but all a bit more real now. I have faith that you will get there and your angels will look down on you and bring you your very own little miracle.

You look after yourself, keep yourself healthy and remember you're eating for three so that extra bit of chocolate is justified

Don't think I'm going to be on here much longer so you might want to move over to the first trimester board. 90% sure that they're going to say no heartbeat, no development when I go on Tuesday. Symptoms gone, just like last time. But regardless, please stay in touch and loads and loads of luck with the next 7 or 8 months!

Thanks ladies! We are in total shock. I wish I could have recorded the moment it was just so surreal.

Hope you are both doing well!

Harry I will keep everything crossed for you for Tuesday. If it makes you feel any better I felt the same and havent really had many symptoms at all and there are two in there! So it ain't over till te screen says so. Hang in there and try and stay positive.

Had scan today at exactly 7 weeks and couldn't believe it when she said the baby was there (I just had one embie transferred), was a good size, in the right place and had a heartbeat! She said she was very happy with the scan. Bit shocked! Know it's ridiculous but since my boobs had dropped about a cup size in the last week, I just put 2 and 2 together and made 5! Bizarre.

Ok so it's early days (last m/c was at 9 weeks) but I have to start to relax so I hereby promise (ish!) to stop posting depressing/worried posts and to try to relax. Wonder how long that will last??!!!!

Julz - how are you doing? I'll probably switch between here and the first trimester board so hopefully see you in one place or the other.

That's great news Harry, congrats. Really pleased for you. Don't worry about the symptoms. Just think I've got two on board and still and generally feeling ok. Everything crossed that all will continue to be well. Do you have another scan or anything or do they just hand you back over to the NHS now and next scan at 12 wks?

I'm doing ok. Was feeling pretty sick for the first time last night and was actually sick this morning. Seems the evenings are worse. But I still wouldn't say it was that bad. But no complaints from me anyway, I'll take it all. Just waiting for the letter with our next scan date which will hopefully be next week sometime or the week after.

Ooh, morning sickness! Yuk! Guess with 2 on board, it's more likely and it must be a good sign too! Know what you mean about the evenings being worse. I'm struggling to face dinner in the evening - unless it's bland and fattening! Fish fingers and chips all the way!

Thank goodness it's nearly the weekend! Feel exhausted and can't wait for a long lazy lie-in!