Monday, September 5, 2011

Despite having the easiest ballpark to hit home runs in, the Philadelphia Phillies are not even in the Top 15 in Home Runs this season. Teams like the Blue Jays, Orioles, Rockies and Nationals are ahead of the Phillies in this category. Power used to be a larger part of the Phillies, but their home run hitters have been sub-par.

Pitching, although #1 in bigs, not as dominant as expected. The #1 reason for this is that Roy Oswalt is 7-8. Not exactly the Ace that they were looking for.

Cliff Lee and Cole Hamels have been worse than expected this year, each losing 7 games.

Raul Ibanez continues to struggle, a splotch in the Phillies lineup, hitting just .241.

Chase Utley, once one of the best hitters in the NL, is hitting just .260.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

1. They have lost more games than any baseball team, period. No team, as of 2011, has lost 10,000 games, except for the Phillies- who have lost far more. It technically doesn't get any worse. Quite simply, the Phillies are the worst team in baseball, and debatably in all of sports.

Stating the obvious would be the observation that all Phillies fans are stupid and self-hating.. but notice how you can't be a Phillies fan unless you are either fat or ugly!

2. They have existed since 1884, yet have won 2 world series rings. Their drunk fans often try and equate such suckage to their biggest rival New York Mets, also prideful of only 2 rings. But with 80 more years of existence and thus 80 more years of failure, the Phillies pathetic excuse for success is laughable in comparison not only with the Mets, but any franchise established in the late 1800's.

3. The idiots who named the Phillies were drunk douche bags. How do we know this? They were re-named 3 times in under 2 years by a crowd of angry rich guys desperately attempting to create a baseball team in a city laughably calling itself "the other New York" as an attempt to draw in tourists disgusted by how dirty Philadelphia was. The "Phillies"? As far as creative names go, one might applaud the New York Mets for shortening Metropolitans and inspiring the metropolitan area to flock to the most diverse place on earth (Queens) to watch Gil Hodges build a franchise in a place called Shea. But, as my friend Julie once pointed out, naming a team "Philadelphia Phillies" is just as creative as naming a team "New York New-Yorkers" or "Florida Floridians". If a team's fans can't even defend its heinous and lazy name, that's when you know alcoholism has played too big a role in their life.

4. Their current stadium is a joke. Talk about home run haven. Sure, the Bronx Bums have mastered the wiffle-ball stadium. But even after fan outrage about the ridiculous amount of home runs, lame modifications didn't change Citizens Bank Park from maintaining its reputation as one of the most hitter-friendly parks in baseball. In 2009, it gave up 149 home runs, the most in the National League and second in the majors behind only the new Yankee Stadium. Things got really bad when a kid hit a ball out of the stadium during a pre-game home run derby. I would have sent a congratulatory letter to the 9 year old, but you don't need to be Carlos Beltran to crush a ball out of CPB. A premature baby could hit a ball out of that shithole in a shit part of a shit city in a shit state known best as "Why the fuck do you live in Pennsylvania?".

5. They try to mix pinstripes and red. The fashion police just threw up. No other team (of the dozen that wear the Phils shade of red) in the majors have even thought about doing something so stupid. The Mets, Cubs, Yankees, White Sox and Twins look classy in stripes. The Marlins, Astros and Phillies all look like shitheads. Although, to be fair to the Phillies, everyone in Citizens Bank Park, aside from commonly invading Mets fans, look like shitheads. It's part heroin epidemic in Philly, part drinking away sorrows as a Phillies fan.

6. Thier old stadium was named both worst and ugliest stadium in America countless times. I would cite some sources, but we are talking about Veteran's Stadium here, folks. If you think Shea got ugly after its renovation in the 80s, you never visited this shithole. Talk about a dump of a sports arena. Smelly, dangerous and quiet- no wonder the Phillies lost so many games...

7. What could possibly be a duller way to win the World Series than than to have Bud Selig tell all the players they couldn't win in a rain-shortened game and thus have to play a couple innings another day? No wonder the on-field celebration was so forgettable. Mets fans run on the field when the team wins a ring...Phillies fans sit around clapping and then burn cars as a bunch of drunk idiots are left with little else to do in a city full of ugly cars and fat people driving them.

8. When the Phillies won the World Series in 08, it was the least watched World Series, ever. We all know the Rays are unpopular, but c'mon, Philly has millions of people, right? I guess half of Philly's population is Mets fans.

9. Kobe Bryant grew up in Philly...as a Mets fan. He looked up to Daryl Strawberry. Look it up, he said so in LA, rooting against the Phillies in the NLDS at Dodger Stadium in 2009. Remember that year, when the Phillies went on to lose the World Series? For them, that's a fantastic year. Standards are low when you are as bad as the Phills.

10. The Phillies took in an old, fat-ass Pedro Martinez, a traitor and douche. How did that work out for them? Who's Your Daddy? Hah, Mets fans used to hate that phrase almost as much as Red Sox fans. Now, we all love it...except for Pedro and the dumbass Phillies fans still praying for that third ring.

And because such suckage can't fit into a concrete top 10, one can't forget to mention everyone's least favorite asshole, Jimmy Rollins. #11- Rollins always predicts the Phillies to go all the way and win the Series. His success rate is almost as low as how many players he has had affairs with.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Times are tough for Mets fans nationwide. Going into the weekend series in Philly, the Mets find themselves 7 and a half games out of contention in the NL East. But, we must rebound, we will rebound and we will crush Philly because THE PHILLIES SUCK.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Some words and an update on thingsThe Mets are not having a very good July thus far. They have just lost three consecutive home games for the first time this season, and have fallen 5 games out of first behind Atlanta. They lost a home series to the Reds and failed to win a four game road matchup with the Nats. Mike Pelfrey has been terrible of late. Still, they have a better record than the Phillies and are just one game out of the wild card. It will be interesting to see what transpires from here. At this point, we have a shot, but we need to get back into it. Phillies really suck. Still do. Always will.

Friday, May 28, 2010

SHUTOUT SWEEP COMPLETE

27 ZEROS VS. PHILADELPHIA MARKS ONLY THE 3RD TIME IN BASEBALL HISTORY A FIRST PLACE TEAM HAS BEEN SHUTOUT THREE GAMES IN A ROW; METS 2 GAMES OUT OF 1ST

Shortly after completing one of baseball's rarer achievements, Mike Pelfrey was told that the only other time the Mets shut out the same team in a three-game series came back in 1969, when Tom Seaver, Jerry Koosman, Nolan Ryan and two others took the mound. "Those guys aren't bad, are they?" Pelfrey said. And what of Pelfrey, R.A. Dickey and Hisanori Takahashi? "Comparable," Pelfrey said, rolling his eyes. Yet this week -- if only for a week -- they were. Pelfrey capped the improbable run Thursday night, pitching seven scoreless innings to lead the Mets to a 3-0 victory and a series sweep of the Phillies at Citi Field. Pedro Feliciano pitched the eighth; Francisco Rodriguez closed things with a scoreless ninth. The Mets have not allowed a run since the ninth inning Sunday against the Yankees. They became the first team to pitch a three-game shutout since the Twins blanked the Royals for three games in 2004. And they became the first Mets team to do it since that group of Miracle workers took the mound for the first three games after clinching the division title in 1969. "It was the most amazing series I've ever been a part of," right fielder Jeff Francoeur said. "The pitching staff was awesome." Pelfrey, on this night, played the role of Seaver, as he continues to develop into something resembling an ace. Using a sharp splitter to combat his lack of fastball command, Pelfrey struck out five, induced three double plays and held Chase Utley, Ryan Howard and Jayson Werth to a collective 0-for-10. Against the same team that tagged him for six runs earlier this month in Philadelphia, Pelfrey was something just short of dominant. Afterward, manager Jerry Manuel noted that "he feels good about being Mike Pelfrey." And the Mets feel good, too. Jose Reyes contributed to all three runs off Phillies starter Cole Hamels, singling and scoring on Jason Bay's double in the first before doubling home two runs of his own in the seventh. And by that time, the Mets were playing some bizarre version of baseball hot potato. Nobody wanted to be the one to give it up. But against the Phillies -- a so-called American League offense, the highest possible honor for an NL team -- somebody had to. Didn't they? "You're always looking at some point for them to explode," Manuel said of the Phillies. "They've got so much power." But they would not and could not use it. "I've never seen anything like that," Reyes said. "Against that kind of team? Shut them out for three straight games? That's unbelievable." When Angel Pagan made a diving catch in the seventh, capping Pelfrey's night and extending the scoreless-innings streak to 25, the thousands who sat through a one-hour, 55-minute rain delay began buzzing. When Feliciano struck out Placido Polanco to make it 26 and counting, the noise increased. And when Rodriguez finally fanned Werth for the 27th out and the 27th scoreless inning, Citi Field grew as loud as it has been all year. "Awesome night," Rodriguez said. Unlike in 1969, when the Mets needed just five pitchers to shut out the Phillies over three games in Philadelphia, the Mets needed nine this time. Back then, Seaver and Koosman pitched complete games, and Ryan threw three innings in relief of Gary Gentry. This time, it was Dickey and Takahashi and Pelfrey and smoke and mirrors. And it worked. "To keep this team from scoring in three games, that's huge," Manuel said. "That speaks volumes for the entire pitching staff. They did a tremendous job." Or as David Wright wryly noted: "Three shutouts is good, isn't it?" Yes, very good indeed. And so the Phillies left Citi Field early Friday morning with their pride a little wounded. Three games against the Mets were not supposed to end like this. But they did still hold the trump card. "No matter how you want to spin it, we're still in first place and we've got a real good ballclub," Werth said. That, of course, is the rub. By any standard, the Mets outdid themselves this week, finishing 5-1 against the two teams that played in last year's World Series. They cannot keep up this pace. No team can. But then, they were also supposed to be umpteen games out of first place right now. They are instead just two games removed, with Johan Santana slated to pitch Friday in Milwaukee. And they have learned the formula for success. "It's tough to lose a game," Pelfrey said, grinning, "when you don't give up a run." (MLB)

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

DICKEY SHUTS OUT PHILLIES

METS GET THE BIG HITS WHILE PHILLY FAILS MONUMENTALLY IN THE CLUTCHWhen the Mets’ six-game homestand began last Friday, it had all the makings of a last stand. They had just returned from a disastrous 2-6 trip. They were in last place in the National League East. Three starting pitchers had dropped out of the rotation because of injury or ineffectiveness. Manager Jerry Manuel, already in the hot seat, was facing persistent questions about his handling of the club. He would have been under even more pressure had his team faltered against its biggest rivals, the Yankees and the Philadelphia Phillies, in front of big crowds filled with frustrated fans at Citi Field. But the Mets may be playing themselves back into relevance and, for now, preserving Manuel’s job. Despite some nail-biting dramatics by the bullpen, the Mets took two of three games against the Yankees over the weekend. On Tuesday, they faced the Phillies at home for the first time this season and showed, at least for one night, that their rivalry still matters. The Mets thumped the Phillies, 8-0. They improved their record to .500 (23-23) and pulled to four games behind the Phillies in the N.L. East. In recent years, games between the Mets and the Phillies have included plenty of tension and controversy. Tuesday’s intrigue included an unusual pair of starting pitchers who threw so slowly they tested the patience of the stadium’s radar gun. R. A. Dickey, a knuckleballer who is missing a ligament in his throwing arm, took the mound for the Mets. Dickey began the year in the minor leagues and was making only his second start for the Mets. He was the second consecutive knuckleballer to face Philadelphia, the first time that has happened to the Phillies since 1983, when they faced Phil and Joe Niekro in back-to-back games. On Sunday in Philadelphia, Tim Wakefield of the Boston Red Sox shut down the Phillies, who lost, 8-3. Dickey threw six scoreless innings. He kept Shane Victorino, Chase Utley and other Phillies who often find a way to hurt the Mets off track. Dickey struck out seven batters, including pinch hitter Greg Dobbs in the sixth inning. That strikeout brought the boisterous crowd of 33,026 to its feet. Dickey, whose pitches danced to the plate between 72 and 77 miles per hour, is the type of player who could become a folk hero in Flushing. He scattered seven hits — all singles — and walked three to record his first victory of the season. He worked in and out of trouble in the second and third innings and survived a scary moment when a line drive hit by Ryan Howard bounced off his left elbow. Dickey had X-rays taken during the game. They were negative, and he resumed pitching with no apparent discomfort. The Phillies started Jamie Moyer, who at 47 is the oldest player in the major leagues this season. Only a handful of his pitches topped 80 m.p.h., and many of his changeups looked more like soft tosses at 68 m.p.h. The Mets did not hit Moyer particularly hard, but they hit him often and in key spots. The Mets scored in the first, second, fourth, fifth and sixth innings, and they added three more runs in the eighth against Nelson Figueroa, a former Met. Jason Bay and Jeff Francoeur drove in two runs each, and Chris Carter added a pinch-hit single to drive in Francoeur. Raul Valdes, who threw three scoreless innings to earn his first save of the season, also hit a run-scoring double in the eighth inning. Bay started the scoring with a groundout that chased Jose Reyes home in the first inning. Bay added a single in the fifth to score Reyes again. Francoeur snapped a 12-at-bat hitless streak with a run-scoring single in the second and a sacrifice fly in the fourth to score David Wright. Manuel, who has often been at a loss to explain the Mets’ recent offensive problems, had to have been happy with what he saw from Reyes, who had three hits, two stolen bases and three runs scored. In recent days, Manuel has faced questions about his leadership of the team, particularly his handling of the starter John Maine’s shoulder injury and his use (or overuse) of the bullpen. That has only increased speculation that he might be fired if the team did not rebound. Manuel has insisted that he has not worried about his employment prospects and is doing his best to motivate his team. “I don’t see it as something that affects the team,” Manuel said, speaking of the questions about his status. “I’m good, I’m good.” Darryl Strawberry echoed Manuel’s stay-the-course message in Washington last week. He told the players they were better than they were performing and needed to do a better job. The players took him at his word. “It’s not like he came in and lectured the whole clubhouse,” Francoeur said. “He just wanted to let us know we need to pick it up a little bit, and sometimes you need to be reminded of that.” (NY Times)

Saturday, May 8, 2010

IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL FRIDAY NIGHT

Rod Barajas hit a two-run homer in the bottom of the ninth inning - his second homer of the game - and rookie Ike Davis smacked two homers as well as the Mets beat the Giants, 6-4, Friday night in a thrilling game in front of 34,681 at Citi Field. After Met closer Francisco Rodriguez blew a save chance in the top of the ninth, Barajas homered off Sergio Roma after Davis had drawn a one-out walk. The Mets, who had lost four-of-five entering the game, got a solid performance from starter Mike Pelfrey, who rebounded from a poor start in Philadelphia last week. Struggling cleanup hitter Jason Bay even contributed, drilling an RBI double in the first inning to give the Mets a 1-0 lead. Davis was dropped to seventh in the lineup because the Mets were facing stingy lefty Jonathan Sanchez. Sanchez had not given up a homer to any hitter or a hit to any left-hander batter this season until Davis slammed a 1-1 pitch off the Pepsi Porch in right field with one out in the second inning. Lefties had been 0-for-17 with seven strikeouts this season against Sanchez until Davis' blast. Barajas followed with a home run down the left-field line, the first time this season the Mets have hit back-to-back homers. It was Barajas' 100th career home run. Barajas, a late signee after the Mets could not come to an agreement with the catcher in the other dugout Friday night, Bengie Molina, now has nine home runs this season. Davis has three. (NY Daily News)