Monday, 3 December 2012

BLUE ULBE BLUE ULBE BLUE ULBE

All right, all right, alright, orrite, er, bleaurgh, what am i supposed to say now? Errrmmm...
Words. Yep, more words, issuing forth from the plastic clatteration which will shortly settle down into something less like automatic writing.

Ooh, i know! Cliff Richard, who has dead eyes apparently, once made an LP called "Good News". Its cover looks like this:

http://www.chartstats.com/art.php?release=36540

That reminds me of NaNoWriMo and people's peculiar tendency to find it hard to write. Writing is easy, particularly with a word processor or a computer. For instance, i can do this:

Good News good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
good news
.

However, the quality of my output there is not high, and this is the problem. I once filled two pages of an exercise book with the words "BLUE ULBE" repeated over and over again in a sort of chessboard pattern. That was easy but time-consuming. Nowadays, things like that are not time-consuming, though presumably they will once again become time consuming what with the end of the world coming up an' all.

People want quality though. They prefer writing not to suck, and this is my problem. I never know if anything i do is good or bad, not just in writing but in all situations. It is, however, particularly relevant to my attempts to write because i can't stop myself. Some famous sculptor once said that it was easy to sculpt, say, Mercury out of a block of stone. It just involved removing all the bits which look unlike him. In a similar way, good writing is easy. You just write stuff which isn't bad, or write anything at all and remove the bad bits. How is this relevant?

Well, it might be relevant because it appears to descend very rapidly into nonsense to many of today's ears, unless the object between them happens to have a degree in English, has recently emerged from a time machine, or maybe if the ears are deaf. Come to think of it, even the first bit probably sounds like nonsense to most ears, partly because those organs are usually placed elsewhere than on either side of an Anglophone human brain. They're more likely to be on the shins of a cricket, the head of a frog or in other places rather unpromising to comprehension. On the other hand, they might be quite useful to small animals as a signal that a large, dangerous animal is in the vicinity, and those same ears might be quite useful to prove that when a tree falls in a forest, lots of tiny ears respond to the sound, and maybe everything is a tiny ear, so there's no such thing as a tree falling in a forest when unheard and therefore that it always makes a sound unless that forest is for some reason on a small planet orbiting Delta Pavonis which has lost its atmosphere or something.