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After posting Lemon Pound Cake and explaining about my adventure in potty training, I have received much more realistic and welcomed advice from all of you. Thank you!

But, the best advice that I think will work is…NOT THE SAME FOR RUDY!

CHEERIO’S DO NOT BELONG IN THE POTTY! “Have you lost your mind, mom!” Cereal belongs in the cereal bowl, NOT the toilet bowl.

Yes, I’m happy Rudy knows that putting food in the toilet isn’t normal. But, I have to question why he isn’t phased by flushing the family pet fish down the toilet, and that this isn’t the least bit traumatic to him…??? hmmmm…? I’m Slightly concerned.

I recently put a new app on my IPad for Rudy to play and learn from called “Potty Time” (I thought I could try to “trick” him into going on the potty by getting this app.) I was going to stop with my efforts and let this cute little frog named Hopkins, do the work for me.

This story explains how Hopkins is a little nervous about letting his diapers go, and one of the pictures is illustrating this cute little frog hugging his diapers like they’re his blankie.

When I read this story I use my super excited voice when Hopkins reaches victory and transitions into “Big Boy Underwear” but this doesn’t phase Rudy. He will just say, “yah froggy good job.” Then he will ask to play games….

Rudy hides when he is doing “his potty time.” It was quiet and he was nowhere to be seen. I usually just follow the unpleasant scent to find my little redhead. But there was no scent this time. I found him hiding in my bedroom sitting on the floor with my IPad going through the book “Potty Time” all on his own. I wanted to shout and praise God for this break through!

I just stood there super quiet listening to Rudy read the story to himself filling in the words from memory, because I have read this book to him 1,978,999 times (yah, I exaggerate). But, through my eavesdropping I noticed Rudy wasn’t repeating the correct words that I say to him.

Rudy wasn’t flipping through the pages either. He was staying on the picture of Hopkins clutching his diapers scared to let them go.

This moment was mixed with emotions for me. I wanted to cry, and smile at the same time. Cry because I felt defeat once again, and smile because I actually did feel and witness a victory from Rudy. I was proud to see Rudy care and feel concern for a little someone that felt scared. It was nice to see this side of my Rudy.

Yes, I know Rudy felt this compassion for this frog in training because he can totally relate, and lets be honest he doesn’t want to be the last one still in diapers! Every child in the nursery at church has conquered using the potty except Rudy. He is feeling a little left behind. And now this little green creature is using the potty too! Rudy felt compelled to talk him out of it!

I keep telling myself the same thing all of you keep telling me, “don’t worry about it, Rudy will not be going to school in diapers!” Yup, I believed you until I saw THIS! Thanks to my sister Becky!

So, for all of you that say this doesn’t happen……ummmm….you might be wrong!

Ok, with all craziness aside, I have let the potty training thing go. I’m a stay at home mother that doesn’t have the pressure to conquer this task for convenience of child care providers. This will happen when he is ready and for some reason he isn’t ready. That’s ok, to be quiet honest I’m not that great at change either. The only change I want to stop is his diapers. It will happen when it happens. Besides I’m not ready for him to grow up so fast either. He’s my Rudy Raccoon.

“Lord, give me the patience to be the best mother I can be for this child you have blessed me with. I don’t want to impact anything negative, I just want to raise my children that will always honor You.”

I guess just like the awesome Lord we have, He never gives up on us, and He is patiently waiting for us to come around at times. I will never give up on my children no matter what, just like the good Lord will never give up me!

Sometimes I feel so humbled by the untainted love God has for me. Gosh, I mess up so often, and yet He loves me with a love that is so perfect and never ending. His love covers me like the morning dew, so soft, clean, pure and refreshing….

My husband is the biggest blessing God has blessed me with. Which in turn makes me fall in love with my Savior all that much more. When The Lord was creating Kent, He had me in mind.

“I am my lover’s and my lover is mine…” Song of Solomon 6:3 NIV

Things I Love about Kent:

1.) he loves The Lord

2.) his ability to tell me, “it’s ok” and I believe him

3.) he is the best daddy ever

4.) he has the ability to make me whisper, “I love you Kent” when he’s not even around.

5.) he loves my food (but he is getting a little too comfortable in his critiquing, he has picked that up from my father)

6.) he ignores my stress during stressful catering jobs and still helps me (BeckyF & Samantha, you both have witnessed this many times)

7.) his dry humor

Things I would like to change about Kent, but love him anyways are:

1.) he hates nuts (so annoying)

2.) he gives me a 5 minute delay before he does anything I ask

3.) he wrestles too hard until he makes someone cry. (Yes, even his own children)

4.) he NEVER puts the milk or orange juice away

5.) he don’t cook. ANYTHING EVER, he would rather starve. (I don’t get it either)

I figured I should stop there and make sure the “I love” column was longer! I will say, the latter column; I typed through it like lightning! 😉

Kent and I have been married for 10 years. Yes, as with all marriages there have been a lot of up’s and down’s, but keeping God in the center of our marriage and giving Him the broken pieces to mend and place back together, has only made our marriage stronger. We have been blessed, because of perseverance.

Hold steadfast in whatever difficult situation you might have, you will be blessed! My prayer is that Kent and I won’t have too many difficult situations, but that we will never grow numb to the importance of our marriage staying strong in the foundation of God always being 1st in everything.

“But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.” Joshua 24:15 NIV

Oh besides, Kent and I have said, “we will never get divorced because we are too cheap and it’s too much paper work!” 😉

Kent loves chocolate. I’m convinced he loves chocolate because I don’t make it that often. Find out why HERE.

Remove the cream from the heat as soon as it starts to get small simmering bubbles around the saucepans’ edges.

Position rack in the middle of the oven and preheat to 325°F. Arrange six 3/4-cup ramekins in a roasting or 9×13-inch pan.

Place the chopped chocolate in a medium sized bowl; set aside.

In a medium saucepan, heat the cream over medium heat until it’s steaming; remove from the heat and pour over the chocolate. Let sit for a few minutes, then whisk until smooth.

Whisk together the egg yolks, sugar and vanilla. When the chocolate mixture has cooled a bit, whisk in the egg yolk mixture. Divide the custard between the cups, and pour warm water into the pan to come halfway up the sides of the cups.

Bake for 25-30 minutes, until the custards are set. Cool, then refrigerate until well chilled.

“Obedience” is a subject Kent and I have mentioned lately in our conversations. We have realized that there are certain circumstances in life that being obedient to God is not that simple. You would think just for the mere fact that we are christians this wouldn’t be so hard. We need to just trust and obey God. But, oh my…that’s easier said then done. God never said it would be easy.

To be obedient is to be “willing” and to “submit”. Just hearing the word “submit” can bring negative feelings, especially for woman. But, God never intended for that word to have a negative stigma. We humans can be put to blame for that. And to be “willing” isn’t that easy either!

Lately there are subjects in my household that bring up the question, “are we being obedient to God?” Well, this question always leaves me thinking. “If I’m obedient to God, it could change my life drastically, it might be uncomfortable to go through, I might be embarrassed, I might lose friends, we could suffer….” Goodness, after listing all these things about being obedient, who would want too?

Then I have to ask myself what would happen if I/we weren’t being obedient to God? Not being obedient to God is far worse then any temporary embarrassment, suffering or loss of friends. We could be in a state of discontentment, or constantly be in search for fulfillment that isn’t being filled by our own searching. And being disobedient is going against what God tells us in John 14:15, “If you love me, you will obey what I command.”

This reminds me of Jonah in the Bible. He didn’t want to be obedient to God by going to Nineveh like God told him to. So, what did Jonah do? He ran away and searched for a place to hide from God. Can you imagine how he felt?! The constant pit in Jonah’s stomach, the worry, the guilt, the disobedience. He tried to escape God and His request and it only made matters much worse for Jonah.

See, by us denying that we need to be obedient to God makes us miserable! Yes, by being obedient to God might not seem like it would be pleasant given your circumstance, but we at least know that God is with us, and we are teaming together to conquer the task at hand. Jonah was running from God and trying to hide from Him, which is impossible. But, through Gods grace He gave Jonah a second chance. I don’t want to run from God, I want to run with Him while He’s holding my hand.

Being disobedient to God is depriving ourselves of His blessings. To be obedient to God is accepting His blessing. His blessing could be unfolded through our journey of obedience by just learning to trust Him, and to grow in spiritual maturity.

Of course being obedient to God doesn’t only bless us but, you never know how our trial blesses others throughout our journey. My friends Valerie and Michelle are both great testaments of this. Valerie just went on a journey to Indonesia. The mission trip she was on lasted 10 days. Valerie has 3 young boys at home that she left behind. She was very hesitant at first to go but she answered the call to be obedient to God. And through this beautiful journey she was blessed by God opening her eyes to a whole new world out there that needed what she had to share, and little did she know just how much she needed them. They were both blessed by her obedience to God. You can read about Valerie’s journey here.

Michelle, (my neighbor from years back.) Her husband and family have surrendered to Gods calling by way of adoption from Ethiopia. Wow, that is so amazing! To rescue a child in need and to be able to share the love of Christ isn’t only a blessing to this child but it will be within their hearts too. And what a strong testimony this child will have to share with others as he grows older throughout his life.
You can learn about Michelle’s journey here.

Just like when our children are being disobedient we as their parent and God as our Father are here to guide us back into the right direction, to protect us and to help us understand what path we need to take, so we can grow and be a light in this often too dark of a world.

So, yes being obedient to God can be a “not so eager” challenge at times. But, to miss out on Gods blessing He has in store for us and others is just tragic.

My good friend Karen sent me this quote, “when you feel intimidated, remember that you have the DNA of the Almighty God!”

Lord, help Kent and I to be bold in obedience to You.

I took this picture of this crabapple tree just about 1 month ago. It was shocking and so refreshing to see what God has in store. I can only imagine it was tough and unpleasant for those blooms to be so vibrant on such a cool winter day. But, it blessed me and it was a nice reminder that “OUR Spring” is just around the corner. We are renewed.

Every morning I get Max up for school and send him off on the bus with a little bit of anxiousness in the pit of my stomach. I, of course worry about his safety at school and on the bus. The roads might be icy, or maybe there was another shooting incident at another school that makes me consider home schooling. Gosh, sometimes these feelings engulf me. “Leave it all in God’s hands Tahny, Max will be home safe and sound shortly after 3pm”….. Sometimes I’m more amazed by how much “loving” aches. It’s so complex.

Last night I had a important conversation with Max, and one of the questions I asked him was, “Max who loves you more then anything?” I have to admit I wanted and was expecting him to say, “you and dad.” But, that’s not what he said at all, he said, “God.” Max answered this question without any hesitation. Of course Max is right, and I couldn’t be more thrilled that he understands this truth without even a second thought. Then unexpectedly I was almost jealous that Max was so secure in knowing he has captivated Gods heart.

I’m amazed at times at the natural ability for children to understand, feel and love without boundaries. It’s like they “get” something we don’t. They understand and can grasp a certain level of Gods love that we adults try way too hard to analyze. We don’t let it just happen naturally, we have to pick it apart and remind God of all our mistakes over and over, and then tell God He couldn’t love someone like me…. But, it’s at this point in my life that I hear Gods precious voice say, “that’s exactly how much I love you Tahny. I love you, more then how awful any sin you have ever done. My love for you has broken the chains, and have set you free, I forgive and have forgotten all your sins that you have confessed and I’m so in love with you.”

The love for my husband and family seems so immeasurable. We imagine life without them, and just the mere thought takes our breath away. How can God love us more then how much we love our own loved ones? I can’t wrap my mind around this one. And I don’t think it’s God intention for us to ever “get it”, He just wants us to know it! Just like Max, he knows it. And, I’m sure throughout life just like the rest of us, he will have times of regret that will make him think he has lost the level of Gods love. And I, as his mother will tell him everything is ok, and there is nothing in this world he can do that will remove the depth of love God has for him, and I will always love my son no matter what too….hey maybe I “get” more then I realize…

I love reading Ephesians 3:14-19 right now. These bible verses make me feel in love with such an incredible Creator. We will never be able in our earthly minds ever realize just how WIDE, how LONG, how HIGH, and how DEEP His love really is. I really love Ephesians 3:19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge–that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. To comprehend the love of Christ is like trying to understand how the ocean knows where to stop on dry land, or the speed of light (I’ll never get that one!) or how I can send an email to my sister in Japan and in 5 seconds it has arrived in her “in-box!” All these things are so hard for my mind to wrap around, but they are all true happenings. Just like the love of Christ, it’s amazing and I certainly cannot wrap my mind around it but I can stand firm in the truth of His promise that He loves me just that much…..immeasurable.

In bible school I remember singing this song as a young child usually being lead by my favorite church leader Michelle 😉 I still remember the hand motions to this song.

Deep and Wide

Deep and wide
Deep and wide
There’s a fountain flowing deep and wide
Deep and wide
Deep and wide
There’s a fountain flowing deep and wide

Lord, I want to love you So deep, So wide, So long and So high. Help me to never loose sight of that. And that I never stop pursuing to understand the complexity of Your love for me, because it’s all I need.

Tonight at church during the candle light service the praise and worship team played one of my favorite songs, “Offerings” the lyrics felt so powerful to me tonight. I’m sure it was with the help of the sanctuary’s lights being dimmed and seeing all the families together worshipping on this snowy Christmas Eve.

Then this older gentleman walks in tonight. He is not a familiar face in my church. But, he is here to worship. He’s clutching and twisting his black cotton hat with his hands as if it gives him some sort of security in this unfamiliar environment. Then you can see the uncomfortableness beginning to be painted all over his weathered face as he attempts to say, “excuse me” to the lady standing in the pew. But, then with the gentle greeting and assistance from an usher (my husband) he has safely landed in the pew.

The realization hits me, he’s alone. This nervous gentleman has come here tonight alone. Ohhh, I bow my head as tears are puddling in my eyes and ask, “why?” I’m not exactly sad about him being here alone, and why would it even matter if he did have a church pew filled with family dressed in sweater vest and beautiful Christmas gowns? Would that make his worship more sincere? No, of course not. I’m just humble by his loneliness and desire to worship. There was something about this old man that touch my heart, to see him come in alone and offer his gift to our King. Worship. Even though I was sitting here tonight with my family this man was offering a genuine gift of worship and obedience, as was I.

Moments like these rejuvenate my spirit. I need that, we all need that at times.

Lord, I’m so glad you don’t want material gifts of the grandest splendor. You just want me. And I couldn’t be more thankful.

Happy birthday Jesus. Thank you for giving me the greatest gift, Yourself. You leave me in awe, just where I want to be. In Your peace.

OFFERINGS
Paul Baloche Lyrics

The sun cannot compare to the glory of Your love
There is no shadow in Your Presence
No mortal man would dare to stand before Your throne
Before the Holy One of heaven
It’s only by Your Blood and it’s only through Your mercy
Lord I come

I bring an offering of worship to my King
No one on earth deserves the praises that I sing
Jesus may You receive the honor that You’re due
O Lord I bring an offering to You
I bring an offering to You

I bring an offering of worship to my King
No one on earth deserves the praises that I sing
Jesus may You receive the honor that You’re due
O Lord I bring an offering to You
I bring an offering to you

“What is your Christmas?” I was just asked that question the other day from my good friend Debi. I kinda looked at her a little puzzled but, then she proceeded to tell me that she has been making Christmas cookies all day and was going to decorate them later that evening. Debi said, that once she makes her cookies, then that nostalgia feeling of Christmas has arrived within her. She also told me how different it is now that the children are all grown up and gone.

Debi throughout the years has always made the “Christmas cookies” with her children but now that the kids live either out of state or hours away, it is just her and her lovely husband rolling them out. Baking these cookies and smelling their sweet scent filling the empty nest, brings back the greatest memories for her to reflect back on and smile but, you could see the longing for her children to be in that kitchen with her as little kiddo’s once more.

This question really made me think. What is my Christmas? What is that moment, food or song that fills my heart with the feeling of Christmas? You would think this would be easy to answer, but all my answers sounded so cliché; baking, making a ginger bread house, shopping, wrapping presents, hearing the traditional songs and watching all the old classic Christmas movies. Yes, these are all things we do and have to get done but, none of these actions were “it” for me. Even listing all these actions sound “busy” & “loud.” Of course, it’s the birth of Christ for me and Debi that fills and lives within our hearts.

Don’t get me wrong, spending time with my family was one of my top answers that was quickly rolling off my tongue before it dawned on me what my answer truly is. And actually, Kent and I just discussed this the other night, even before Debi asked me the initial question. My answer is; sitting on the couch after the boys are in bed, and the house is quiet and all the lights are off and the only light is coming from the Christmas tree. There is something calm and peaceful about this moment for me. I sit and stare at all the old, new and the most precious homemade ornaments and get misty eyed thinking its been another whole year. Once I get my first evening in with the Christmas tree then I feel as if Christmas has arrived.

I can guarantee the original tree that Christ was hung on nearly 2 thousand years ago never was decorated with light and ornaments. (Or was His manger for that matter) Looking at my tree while it’s quiet and calm in my household, makes me think that the lights on my tree represents that God sent Christ as a Savior to be the Light of the world. He’s my light!

As you look at the Christmas tree this year I hope that it reminds you of the obedience Jesus had to honoring the Father even to the point of placing His life on the original Christmas tree…the cross.

I recently just read this story:
The story is told of a mother who is decorating the Christmas tree and nearby is her teenage daughter. The mother says “I still have a lot of decorating to do here, I don’t know how I will get it all done.

The daughter replies
“Well, I can help…if I don’t have to go visit Uncle Jim with you.”

The mother responds
“Nice try, but your going!”

The daughter says
“But mom why do I have to go there?”
“There are murderers there and people who beat their wives and all sorts of people.”

The daughter then picks up an ornament and notices it’s broken.
She sighs with sadness and disappointment over it being broken.

The mother comes over to the daughter and observes the broken ornament. She shares with her daughter how special the ornament is and that her father had made it when she was only six years old.

The mother additionally shares that this was Uncle Jim’s favorite ornament.

When he was a little boy he would take it from the tree and hold it and enjoy it so much.

The mother then looks at the ornament and then at the daughter and says
“You, know this ornament reminds me of your Uncle Jim. He is broken, just like this ornament.”

“Uncle Jim is precious to God because God made him.”

Then the mother smiles and says
“God can fix Uncle Jim’s brokeness.”

She hugs her daughter and says
“we can fix this ornament.”

The daughter says
“Yes, mom let’s do that and as soon as we are done let’s go visit Uncle Jim together.”

Do you know anyone… whose life is broken…like that precious ornament? I know that I have been broken a few times throughout my life. And, I have constantly been in need of repair. Aren’t you grateful for Jesus and that original Christmas tree that brings restoration to broken lives? I certainly am! I couldn’t live in the freedom without it.

Every one of us has been a broken ornament at some time. A precious ornament of God’s creation, yet broken because of our sin. I will rejoice this Christmas because of Christ on the original Christmas tree that we are no longer broken. God restores us through Jesus Christ.

The greatest and first tree used was the wooden cradle to hold our Savior born as a baby. Then to the greatest tree used, “The Cross”. Let us not forget as we reflect on another Christmas season.

In the last two weeks I’ve been in the company of two beautiful handicapped redheads. One with multiple sclerosis and the other going through chemo treatments. Both in which were the same age as my redhead Rudy. I of course, find myself feeling the knot in my stomach making the connection to my own child, and also wonder what gives these mothers the strength to endure? We as parents all know what it is, LOVE and just the plain fact of being a mother. And especially being a Christian, it could only be a God giving strength to be able to endure seeing your child go through suffering.

Moments like seeing this young mother holding her toddler with a face-mask on and thinning hair, really make me think about the moments when I feel I’m going to really “loose it” with my redhead. I’m sure this mother would love to do anything to be able to chase after her little boy running away from her giggling with each speedy step and not behaving. Yes, even in frustrating moments like these, I need to be more thankful.

I feel these are snapshots in life that God gives us as a reminder of what it could be for you and me. We need to not only be thankful that we have healthy children of course, but there are these parents out there that need our help, our love, and most importantly our prayers. Since that day in the nursery with the young boy with MS, my perspective of raising both my children has change somewhat. To raise a child with multiple sclerosis takes strength & patience both in which would come from God. I need strength and wisdom from God to be a parent that not only my children later in life would hopefully say, “they are proud of me” but, most importantly for my Lord and Savior to say the same.

How can we love someone that has only been in our life for 3 quick years as if we have known and loved them from the beginning of time?

From the time Rudy was born he has been an attention stealer. Every parent with a redhead knows what I’m talking about. For some reason people are drawn to mention and point out that “awww your baby is a redhead!” I love it! For people to dote on my baby and notice how beautiful his hair is makes me smile ear to ear!

I was determined to not let the stereotype of redheads be true for my Rudy! But, then he turned one. Eek! He’s kinda grumpy, oh boy he has a temper that could boil water, he’s stubborn, and so intense. Then I had to surrender to the fact the stereotype is true. He’s a hot head.

I’ve learned/learning to be a parent to this type of child. I think we have to bring to the table all different skills as a parent that is unique to every child’s different personality. I’ve only known how to raise “gentle Max” and then I was thrown into a typhoon named Rudy. And I’m so glad I am. God knew exactly what was needed for our family, me as a mother, and the perfect little brother for Max.

The most important thing I’ve ever done as Rudy’s mom was just except and embrace this child God handmade just for Kent and I. Don’t fight it, just embrace it. Time flies by so fast, and every since I’ve done this, I’ve enjoyed the roller coaster ride at this amusement park that is full of cookies, Reese’s cups, M & M, cake and Tootsie Rolls. Who wouldn’t have fun in Rudy’s world!

Here are 5 interesting facts about redheads:

1. Redheads Shun the Dentist
*According to research published in the Journal of the American Dental Association, people with red hair tend to have more dental-office phobias.

I didn’t know this until I started to do my research! I took Rudy to his 1st dentist appt. last week and he refused to “open up” he was trying to be brave, but as you can see the tears in his eyes he was terrified. No success that day. Later that day I asked him why he didn’t let the dentist check his teeth and his response was, “got paste and toothbrush, go home.” Ok, simply put.

2. Although less than 4 percent of the world’s population is naturally red-haired, the most popular color of at-home hair dye is red.

3. In the late 16th century, the fat of a redheaded man was an essential ingredient for poison. (That’s just weird)

4. Hot tempered & stubborn
*Enough said….

5. Red hair doesn’t gray as much as other hair colors. Red hair initially tends to turn blond and then white.

Rudy is only 3 years old and I could write a full chapter book about “The Adventures of Rudy Raccoon” we call him Raccoon cuz he scurries away whenever he gets caught in action doing a No! No!

Like for instance Rudy just knocked down our tree, then tried to hide.

As many of you know I’m a fitness instructor. So that means Rudy had free range in the gym during the last yoga class I was teaching to 15 students. I was doing the pose “downward dog” and my little darling Rudy came up behind me and pulled down my yoga pants all the way down to my knees! Complete full moon! Do you know how hard it was to stay calm and unaffected by his action?! I’ve never been so RED in my life!

There is no denying that Rudy is a handful. And Rudy is not your cuddle type and he will barely ever hold your hand, but when he does, you cherish it all that much more, just like when he gives you a random kiss. It makes me melt. He has enriched our family with endless laughter.

If you were to ask Kent and I, if we would change it? We both would sternly shake our heads no! We never knew what we were missing until we had Rudy. I thank God, He did. I can almost envision God laughing when He was making Rudy and mumbling, “oh boy…” Our life and everyone else’s would never be the same without him! We are blessed to have the privilege to raise Rudy. Just buckle in and enjoy the ride!

Lastly, for the two little handicap boys that have crossed my path; you’re in Gods hands, under His great direction. And even though, this would be heart wrenching as a parent, the one comfort we can cling to is His promises. God’s promise to never leave nor forsake us. Easier said then done as I’m typing and listening to Rudy sing, I know. But I can pray for you to have that peace and comfort. And besides, your sons are redheads, and I know they are stubborn and determined, two great attributes to have to overcome any obstacles. May God bless you both.

Each day of our lives we make deposits in the memory banks of our children. ~ Charles (Chuck) Swindoll

“The family should be a closely knit group. The home should be a self-contained shelter of security; a kind of school where life’s basic lessons are taught; and a kind of church where God is honored; a place where wholesome recreation and simple pleasures are enjoyed.”~ Billy Graham