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Thanks to Kevin and Bean from KROQ

The all-star (and all-dude) bill brought the drunken sausagefest demographic and subsequently their were lots of jokes about the difference between men and women, the class breakdown of who was in the balcony seats and who was in the orchestra seats, California’s greatest gift to mankind (marijuana), and race.

After some KROQ.com video like Beer Mug’s “Do You Wanna Finish That” and his video with Psycho Mike on “Mancercising,” DJ Mike Relm started off the night with scratching and video loops like a scene from Reservoir Dogs andgruesome yet hilarious crash scenes.

Even though it was like 50-something degrees out, Kevin & Bean came out wearing bro shorts and announced the night after Jimmy Kimmel announced them via video. Hilarity ensued, magic happened and a lot of people were offended… and that’s when the fun started. It was one of the best April Foolishness’ yet, only to be exceeded if a midget had been included in the festivities, as comedian Eddie Ifft pointed out.

In no particular order, just like the chaos that ensued last night, here at the Top 8 Reasons April Foolishness 2014 Ruled.

1) Patton Oswalt Singing “Let It Go” from Frozen

Oswalt was the most “family-friendly” of the comedians. Although he called the audience a bunch of “charitable drunks” and told the other comedians that those “poor motherf**kers” have no idea what they’re “walking into,” Oswalt’s brand of humor was more self-deprecating and witty than the bawdiness that ensued later on. He made fun of his “one uncut manboob,” his Hobbit stature when he told a story about trying to buy John Varvatos pants, and the “pill bottles the size of a police flashlight” that his elderly parents whip out for his recreational access to Vicodin and Ambien. But most of Oswalt’s jokes were about his young daughter Alice, her struggles as a little woman, and in trying to reconcile her possible traumatic reaction to Benicio Del Toro dressed as a Wolfman, Oswalt did a little spontaneous song-and-dance number of “Let It Go” from Frozen. The skit received such a warm applause that other comedians were playing off it all night long.

Filling in for Marc Maron, Reggie Watts is having his time to shine right now in the media. His brand of comedy was completely different than the typical stand-up fare that people are used to. Watts is more a mind manipulator, a complex intellectual who uses complete absurdism to target a mixture of perverse enlightenment and just make you realize that give a f**k makes life less humorous. With his big hair and a shirt emblazoned with the words “self-conformist,” Watts’ humor went over the heads of a lot of people, but the dude is comedy innovator who understands, as he says, “yes, we’re here to laugh it up and have some laughies,” but that his performance art is more than that. “Some of you people are probably like what the f**k…and that’s cool,” said Watts. When someone in the audience said he “sucked,” Watts replied without even blinking: “Oh I f**k? That’s right. I do f**k. And you can f**k off, too.” After making some blithe comment about planting people in the audience to say he sucks, Watts did a musical mash-up beatbox and won the hearts of the audience with his musical talent.

Williamson won second place on America’s Got Talent, but as he says, he lost to a Japanese man from Japan which makes him the most “talented American in America.” The young comedian had that raunchy old-school flare of classic comedians, stand-ups that targeted all the button-pushing topics like race and sex. Williamson’s jokes ranged from hating Japanese people because of the one Japanese guy that stood between him and a million dollars, making fun of the Kardashians my calling himself a loser on a reality show (but with less body hair), saying that Heidi Klum kissed him on the mouth (“She’s German. I’m Jewish. That’s gross.”), saying that most Grandma’s are really old (“unless you’re a Hispanic”), teaching his kids to appreciate people that are “every color in the rainbow” (“That means no black people”), and saying Chris Brown’s first reaction to when he saw Rihanna was “I’d hit that.”

Jefferies is the sort of comedian a lot of basic bros wish they were. He has a model girlfriend he impregnated after two months of knowing her, epic stories of partying, and a sort of slimy swagger that suggests he’s got that comedian-cum-rockstar lifestyle under lock. Although according to him, the comedians version of partying is “stretching out two grams of cocaine” and contemplating whether to hang outside of hospitals with the nurses get out to pick up girls.

KROQ alum, Adam Carolla, brought it full circle with his tale of how Jimmy Kimmel (another KROQ alum) messed with him after Carolla went to the Grammys with Natalie Maines from the Dixie Chicks, despite the dislike from his now wife. He told a story about how presumably recieved flowers from Maines after the show and Kimmel told Carolla to call the country-fied pop star and shoot her down. After doing that, the next day he got a giant cookie and Kimmel, again, encouraged him to call the singer and tell her he has a girlfriend. After getting a giant sub and some used panties, Carolla called Maines again, at the behest of Kimmel, and was told that she didn’t send any of that stuff. When he turned around Kimmel was standing on his desk “videotaping the whole thing.”

We’ve seen Benson before and he’s never appeared as high as he did last night. Most of his jokes were stoner conversations, albeit hilarious ones. Slurring his words, he called the KNX 1070 traffic helicopter the “traffic chopter” after making lewd commentary about triple-teaming traffic coverage. He talked about a masseuse being a total “d*ck skipper,” the recovery fees for marijuana in a hotel room, and played off the audience and other comedians, making fun of them and then saying, his eyes barely opening: “I’ll roast all these motherf**kers. I’m the angriest stoner ever. Watch out.”

British-born Australian performer, Tim Minchin, is a heady mixture of all that is weird and wonderful. His performance style was a little Eddie Izzard, a little Russell Brand, a little Mighty Boosh, and then mostly, just the wacky twitchiness that makes Minchin’s comedy so utterly original. Minchin shines when he’s doing musical performance or playing off his ingenious knowledge of lyrical and poetic rhythm. He started off his set with spoken word poetry to his therapist in a fake Tourettes-laden poem called “Angry.” From there, he sat down at the piano pulled out for him and performed a love song about obsessive, insane love buffered by, yes, “Let It Go” from Frozen. When the audience voted on him playing another love song about his wife who was in the audience. Michin quipped sarcastically: “What is it with women? What is it with aeroplane food that so confuses mediocre comedians?” He messed up a little on his “love” song, which was basically telling his wife that if he wasn’t in love with her, he’d be in love with someone else, based on statistics, but overall, Minchin was one of the highlights of the night.

Long-time April Foolishness performer, Eddie Ifft made sure to close out the night with his brand of bawdy baddassery that is combination self-deprecation and then deprecation of the whole entire world. He was the perfect cap to Kevin & Bean’s April Foolishness.