For my second pregnancy, I requested a caesarean section from the start. I’ll explain my reasons in a moment, but I want to be clear: I don’t think I needed a “good” reason, and I encountered several medical professionals along the way who questioned my choice.

The first time a doctor said “no” happened the day of an appointment I’d made with a consultant obstetrician to find out if I should try to have another baby. Was I too high risk?

I made the appointment because my first baby had been born with brain damage. I didn’t want that to happen to another baby. Was it the birth? Was it me? Was it an accident? No one knew.

I thought I should investigate further. But, it didn’t matter. I found out I was pregnant the day before the appointment.

“Don’t worry,” the doctor said to me without even a glance at my notes, “there is no reason why you can’t have a natural birth.”

“Actually, I’m pretty concerned about that. I think I’ll have a caesarean.”

“No, a natural birth will be fine.”

I found myself nodding and smiling while inside having a complete mental breakdown. And with that, she showed me the door and wished me good luck.

As soon as we stepped outside, I said to my husband, “There is no way I am having a natural birth.”

Of course, I did have a “good” reason to have a caesarean, but that didn’t stop that doctor commenting on my choice. Time after time, I’d attend hospital for a routine appointment with a doctor or midwife who knew nothing of my medical history and be asked to justify my choice again and again. Because people believe “good” and “bad” reasons exist, they felt they had a right to comment on what was in fact a well-thoughtout, considered decision made under the guidance of a consultant obstetrician specialising in high-risk births.

Caesareans are on the rise in Britain, 10% of births 30 years ago to almost 25% of births today. The NHS wants to bring those numbers down. They believe caesareans are more harmful to mothers than natural birth and they haven’t seen an improvement in outcomes for babies. But, there is another motive: caesareans are more expensive.

It is an operation after all, and with that comes a team of doctors and nurses. A drug-free caesarean is clearly not an option. Mothers stay in hospital longer and their recovery can also be longer. If you are choosing a caesarean, you need to be aware of these risks.

Me directly after delivering my second baby.

But, I’ll say this as well. Compared to the protracted delivery of my first, a labour that began with my waters breaking and 68 hours later, me being rushed to theatre to deliver with suction and forceps, my elective caesarean was a sedate affair. It was ordered and calm. I had a team of people around me rather than one, locum midwife. And, it was over in 45 minutes. Was I wrong to want that?

One of my concerns with this debate is that very little is written about the difference between emergency and elective caesareans. Clearly, there are differences. The maternal death rate in one study went from 5.9 for elective caesarean delivery to 18.2 for emergency caesarean per 100,000 births.* The study also pointed out that natural births were safer than either types of caesareans.

But then, caesareans are generally performed for medical reasons, so these numbers shouldn’t be that surprising. Despite inflammatory sideline chants of “too posh to push” only about a quarter are planned, elective ones, again mainly for medical reasons.

The idea there are “good” reasons and “bad” reasons, seems to stem from a distrust in women to make informed decisions about their own bodies and babies. With investigation and discussion, mothers and doctors can make the right decision together. Surely, this is the imperative to making caesareans safer for women?

Thinking about having a caesarean? Blogger Sarah Cawood gives you the lowdown on her experience here:

The first thing I discovered is that the epidural can make you sick. If your blood pressure drops too quickly when the anaesthesia is being administered, you may be a bit barfy.

I was the first time, but the second time my fab anaesthetist managed my meds brilliantly and I felt fine.

Once you're opened up, air gets in your innards, so when you're in recovery (and for a good few hours after that), things can get a bit, erm, breezy. All pretty standard and no medical practitioner is going to be offended by it.

So, your gorgeous little bundle has been pulled out of the top and that's it, right? Wrong. It takes about 45 minutes after delivery to stitch you back up again. Oh and there are loads of people in theatre with you too.

However, it goes quick because your mewling newbie is just a total time waster! I loved that Daddy got to have first cuddles too since I was a bit indisposed what with the major surgery and everything.

I only got one dose of decent painkillers (I think it's usually diamorphine), so if that's the same for you, make sure you enjoy that hit as much as possible. I felt LOVELY. And SICK. I asked for an anti-emetic to get rid of the nausea, then I just felt LOVELY.

After that it's paracetamol and ibruprofen. Take them on time religiously or suffer the painful consequences.

You will be encouraged to get up and walk around as soon as you can post operatively. It doesn't feel too bad at first when you are still full of a cocktail of drugs.

After they had worn off though: OUCH. Really OUCH. C-sections take much longer to recover from than vaginal deliveries, but you do recover.

Make sure you have help at home for a week or so afterwards though. Also, no driving and no lifting heavy stuff (like toddlers) for 6 weeks. Totally unrealistic, but try to limit it anyway. You don't want to bust your stitches.

It can take a lot longer for your milk to come in post c-section: mine took five LONG DAYS.

I suspect it is because nature hasn't taken her usual course and the hormonal triggers aren't present. This one is really important to remember because getting breastfeeding established is hard enough anyway.

Having a caesarean delivery is not failure on any level. Modern medicine is bloody miraculous and anything that enables your baby to arrive safely can only be a good thing. Let go of the hypnotherapy birth plan if you need to and go with the flow.

Park that guilt mama and cuddle that baby.

Finally, if you are as fascinated by the whole medical process as I am, then this is possibly going to be the best tip I can give you: when you're lying on the table with the tent up to prevent you from seeing your innards looking out, if you want, you can catch a little glimpse of the gory stuff by checking out the reflection in the lights above you.

They're not always brilliantly placed for snooping, but quite cool to see. And if you don't want to see anything - don't look up.

My husband was brave enough to to look over the tent second time around and saw his daughter exit my womb and take her first breath. Very cool.

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Your article was interesting. i didn’t have a choice to have a c-section with my first baby because I almost had a stroke. So the doctor decided it would be best to do it this way. I actually wanted a c-section. Two hours after surgery I rolled myself over and 8 hours after surgery I got up and walked. The day after I was released from the hospital I walked my whole neighborhood and even walked up hills. I am going to have my second child and will be having another c-section. From my experience it is better not to baby yourself. If you do it will take longer to heal. I am not saying go run a marathon or anything like that, but it is good to get back to your normal routine as soon as you feel comfortable. I will be doing the same with this c-section as my last. I am not going to baby myself, get back to walking, and with in reason my normal routine. Each person is different and their body heals at different rates. For me this is what worked best and helped me heal the fastest.

Stacie Lewis

Thanks Belinda! I don’t know what medical advice is but I do remember they tried to get me moving pretty soon after as well. Not hill climbing, mind you! I took it easy. You sound like a superwoman 🙂 But, I did find the healing was faster than I expected, especially after my first birth which was natural but traumatic.

Kerrianne Morley

I had an elected c section but i had to fight for it despite waiting for a liver transplant and my specialists saying natural birth could kill me die to excessive strain on my organs. My c section wasnt agreed to until 34weeks, despite being told at 6weeks i could go into premature labour as early as 28weeks.
My whole pregnancy was filled with fear of if i went into labour early would i be forced to try a natural birth.
In the end my son arrived at 38weeks via elected c section

Stacie Lewis

That’s an awful story Kerrianne. It just goes to show that these decisions should be made on an individual basis instead of the government deciding one method of birth is preferable to another. Hope you are well now x

Olya

Sorry for my English (it’s not my native language), but I have a question. You said they waited 68 hours? But why? When my waters broke and birth pangs didn’t start, doctor said they would wait 24 hours and then take measures. Or you had 68 hours of birth pangs?

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