6.26.2006

“You'd kill yourself for recognition. Kill yourself to never ever stop. You broke another mirror. You're turning into something you are not.” - Radiohead

Maybe the best thing for me to do would be to stop listening to music that causes me to ponder to deeply, but let’s face it - that will never happen. Music is a part of my life. Always has been and always will be. I’m tuning in when I get ready, in the car, almost all day at work. And even if it’s not playing out loud that doesn’t mean I don’t have a song playing in my head.

Even today I sit at my desk grappling with my mounting assignments, deadlines and thoughts of the unknown. Songs randomly shuffle through my ipod as background. Then occasionally things happen, like a wave of emotion suddenly rushes over me.

Sometimes this can be wonderful. Ya know I will hear something I haven’t heard in a while and my whole attitude will change. It can make me smile and get me to secretly be dancing in my chair. It can make me think back onto a fun memory associated with a tune. Other times I hear songs and it floods my mind with thoughts like “what are you doing?” or “where are you going?”

It was not long ago I was sitting behind a similar desk in Georgia (and for the record it was cluttered chaos too) churning out work. Wondering who I was going to be in 5 years, but not having a clue. Thinking if I could just be down the road onto the next thing I would be able to prove myself. I could be that something or someone. Now it’s beyond that 5-year mark and I’m not sure I’ve blazed anymore of a path then when I started. Could it be that I’m like this Radiohead song spinning my wheels (sometimes selflessly) for something that I’m never going to quite be? Thus setting myself up to be left “High & Dry”?

I’ll continue to ponder this concept and other thoughts as I motor along through my working days contemplating what’s in store for my life.

6.18.2006

“Don't you realize? The next time you see sky, it'll be over another town. The next time you take a test, it'll be in some other school. Our parents, they want the best of stuff for us. But right now, they got to do what's right for them. Because it's their time. Their time! Up there! Down here, it's our time. It's our time down here. That's all over the second we ride up Troy's bucket.” -Mikey Walsh from “The Goonies”

Just like Mikey Walsh stated at the time of this quote, I too am feeling a bit empowered as of late to make the most of my time. Maybe this has to do with the fact a few of my friend’s are departing or have departed Memphis this month for locations around the country and world. They are blazing new paths in their lives from afar, but I do hope that our Goonie like spirit will help to ensure our adventures continue on for another day.

Truth be told, what I’m going to miss the most from these folks is the constant joy and smiles the contributed to our gatherings. I don’t believe this is going to fade over time & distance, but it sure won’t be the same since our conversations won't be face-to-face.

Those one-on-one conversations, complimented by those facial expressions often left me in hysterics. The laughter causing so much pain in the sides that tears literally began to roll down my cheeks! The dueling quotes, the intense debates and the sporadic train of thoughts that somehow all tied together...

And knowing how long-winded I can be on occasion, it is quite refreshing to have that balance of friends that aren't afraid to deflate my precious bubble. Popping that mentality bubble of “your never wrong/always perfect” innuendo (which many of us often live in). This always allowed a revelation within me and others that life shouldn't be taken so seriously, but lived with a little more of that love and lightheartedness.

6.07.2006

Oh My!!! Look at how quickly the time has slipped away. I do declare that I've been rather negligent about keeping up with my blog. Well hopefully this will change in the future. As of right now I would like to share the wisdom that I’ve been seeking/gaining over the last month. Below are two highlights:Field Trip for WorkOh yes my friends!!! Some people don’t like to travel for work, some people do…I on the other hand don’t get to do it that often, so I’m pretty much ok with it. In fact one of the best reasons to travel with work for me is because it equates to a big field trip. And we all know what happens on field trips – lots of good intentions, lots of information in a short amount of time and lots of laughs :-) . In all serious though I headed to East Tennessee for a week in Chattanooga. Along the way I just had to make a stop at Rock City (how could one resist all those signs planting subliminal messages along EVERY single mile marker), getting into to the city about an hour after anticipated. Of course this gave my co-workers much fodder for the duration of the trip. The next two days I worked my arse off visiting an end-user in Dalton, GA and spending the rest of the time at the Plant. Did you know that Dalton, GA is the drug trafficking capital of the US? Did you know that spending hours in a plant wearing those fashionable earplugs and safety glasses is so in the season, but still doesn’t reduce headaches? Did you know that eating steak two nights in a row could send you into a carnivore spinout? Who knew that traveling for work could lead to all this new knowledge. But remember this was like a field trip and just like the kid I am at heart I embraced and soaked up the surroundings like a trooper!Hot Butter Rolls!Memorial Day also lead a few of my friends and I on yet another mini field trip/adventure to the “Home of the Throwed Rolls.” For those of you who are not privy to the ins and outs of the southern living – Lambert’s is a famous down-home cooking restaurant located in the heart of the boot heel of Missouri. Folks that's right - my friends and I traveled up along the Mississippi river half way between Memphis & St. Louis for LUNCH…Who could blame us though? A 5 hour round-trip to get hot rolls thrown at folks heads, friend okra, country fried steak, black-eyed peas, fried taters, fried chicken and all the fixins’. My oh my with all the southern style it could get even novice singer to belt out a country tune. After we filled our bellies we decided to head home. Only to travel slightly south to visit New Madrid, MO the site of the great shake. This little sleeper town held a small museum that showcased information about the great earthquake on the New Madrid Fault Line (which runs also along the Mighty Mississippi) that created shakes for days on end in the 1800s. The quake was so violent that is caused the Mississippi River to run backwards and created Realfoot Lake. Needless to say we spent far too much time in the museum (which was initially just a potty break) because the old ladies running the place kept showing us videos and suggesting we do a complete tour of the place. So we turned our trip for lunch into a semi-historical tour of the river most of us have grown up on.

Obviously there was much more that occurred in the last month, but I’ve waited so long between posts most of my thoughts seem to be blurring. The two solid weeks of traveling, catching up on movies, reading, BBQs, watching baseball and hours of hot yoga have made my mind has gone to mush. I hope to catch ya'll sooner rather then later!