This Mom’s Video Calls Out the Ridiculous Things We All Said Before We Had Kids

It’s easy for people to claim they know exactly how they’d behave in a hypothetical situation.

From armchair quarterbacks who are sure they could run a football team better than the coach, to backseat drivers who definitely would’ve seen that grocery cart lurking in the parking lot and swerved before they hit it, we’ve all dealt with (or, let’s be honest, been) this kind of well-meaning know-it-all.

Parents might be more familiar with this than anyone. As hilarious vlogger and mom of three, Tova Leigh, points out in a recent video on her page, people without kids often aren’t shy about sharing how they would raise children, if they had them…and as the comments illustrate, parents aren’t too shy about sharing how these lofty plans get shattered once those kids aren’t hypothetical anymore.

Leigh starts off by explaining that she (like almost every mom and dad) has heard plenty of “very strong statements” from non-parents about the “best” way to raise children.

Hey, I’m no different! Before I had kids, I planned to follow all the expert advice about screen time limits. I was going to lovingly prepare all my kids’ baby food at home to avoid dreaded additives and preservatives, and I certainly wasn’t going to let them (GASP!) cry, no matter how tired or frustrated or generally insane I became!

LOLOLOLOLOL forever.

Once you’ve had a kid or two or (in my case, five)…well, let’s just say your perspective changes. A lot. Here are some of the most common claims Leigh has heard from childless friends and strangers.

“My kids are not going to be sitting in front of the TV, or playing with my phone.”

Yeah, let me know how long that lasts. Probably right up until the first time your toddler is screaming in the pediatrician’s waiting room and you realize that a quick visit to Ponyville on the latest My Little Pony app will buy you ten minutes of blessed peace.

Or the first time you haven’t showered in six days and you know Sesame Street will give just enough time to finally wash your hair…

“I am never going to give my kids any junk food, or sweets, or candy, or anything remotely unhealthy.”

Seriously?

Making healthy choices about food is an important goal, for ourselves as much as our kids. But when you’re driving by McDonald’s after a long, exhausting day at work, and the thought of cooking dinner makes you want to crawl into a hole, and then a tiny voice pipes up from the backseat begging for a happy meal…all your good intentions fly right out the drive-thru window.

Besides, I hate to tell you this, but your kid is going to eat half a pinata of candy the first time one of their friends has a birthday party anyway. There’s no point trying to fight it.

“My kids are never going to throw tantrums in public.”

Oh, okay!

If you think parents have any control over that whatsoever, then it’s possible you’ve never actually met a human child before.

Leigh’s video has been viewed more than 750,000 times in just a few short days, and over 1,100 people parents and non-parents alike have weighed in with their thoughts. Many of them shared what silly things they had planned before their own kids came along.

Because really, you have no idea what to expect until you’re already in the middle of it.

Others from around the world joined the conversation with examples Leigh didn’t mention in her video.