The Remote Control

The Remote Lamp by Caroline CunninghamYou’ve all heard the story of the genie. Magic lamp, three wishes, you rub it and BOOM! A genie pops out. Aladdin and Alibaba, they all had them. Back in the golden days if you had a genie in a lamp then you were rich!Now what people really don’t know is that genies in lamps were actually passed on to different generations. Those generations moved out of the Middle East, so pretty soon there were lamps everywhere. I had a cousin lamp who was in England during the eighteenth century once. He belonged to some old guy named Dickens. I wonder what he did with the wishes.The magic lamps weren’t always lamps as well. The magic could be transferred to a different object once the owners had used up their wishes. Then the genie moved to a different object to carry on the luck to another guy.Anyway, by my bad luck I ended up as a remote control to a Samsung TV in the 21st century. No one even believed in genie’s anymore. So there I am, another day on display in this stupid little Best Buy, when a little man comes over to me. He had on this little blue uniform with a letter embroidered onto the front. I guess he was a postal service worker or something. Now this guy looked about four feet high. He didn’t have a whole lot of hair or good looks about him either. His uniform was dirty and fraying, and BOY did he smell! My guess was he wasn’t a very well off guy.This made me feel a little sorry for him. I wanted to say, “Hey come over here and I can make any wish come true for you!” But I couldn’t. Because I was a TV remote.The guy gets a shop attendant and comes over to my display. The postal man asks if he could buy the TV. So the attendant took the fistful of cash that the postman had in his hand and started counting it. As it turns out, the man could only afford one (1) TV remote. So the postman waddles over to me in all his four foot glory and picks me up. The attendant puts me in a bag, and I went home with the man.Well I’m sure you can figure out what happens from then. The guy gets home, rubs me, finds out I can grant wishes, and then goes wild.He asks to live in this old castle in Armenia. Sure- why not kid. Knock yourself out. As it turns out, this guy was so dim he only had one wish he could think of.So here I am. Lying on a windowsill in this old castle. I guess I can’t transport to another object because I didn’t use up all three of my wishes. Maybe next time I’ll actually get a cool item.

The Royal Remote by Marissa McNeeseI the am the grand and mighty remote control that will grant one wish to anyone who does three things that I have asked of. I am praised by all!!! So praised that the royalties keep in in their special room and only the rich may talk to me. I could go around controlling everyone’s life, but I don’t have time for that anymore. I’m living a luxurious life! I’m royalty! But I hate it! I want to be human and walk! Well anyways... enough about me, so this other day I was talking to this guy...his name was Seven. That fellow was quite the strange guy. Anyways he was talking about how he wanted my life, and he no longer wanted to be a postal service worker, and he would do anything to switch. I thought about it for a long while. I've always wanted to become a human...what it is like to walk and dance and fall in love?! So I told this man to do three things: bring me 10 apples, 20 pears and 5 pieces of gold. On the day he brings them to me we will feast. Eat like we have never done before, and by midnight he will become a remote control, and at last I will have a name. I will finally be human.

Victorian Artifact by Megan KochI belong to the ancient Victorian House. I have been here for centuries, withering away, alone, forgotten. Floating along the dusty corridors, through the lofty and ornate rooms, humming to myself. But one fateful day, there was a knock at the old servant door. I was quick to appear there & open the door. I was expecting a lost animal, but never an elderly man with a satchel. He stood in the doorway, quaking. He timidly held out a single envelope. I swished it from his, and for the first time, he saw me. And his jaw dropped to the floor.“You are real!” Holding the letter aloft, I flew across the house, footsteps pounding behind me. “Come back! I only want to ask you something!” So I slowed, until the battered man appeared beneath me, panting. “Are you the magic artifact? Are you truly THE remote? The one that can control everything?” With the magic still left in me, I flickered the lights in a pattern people call “Morse Code.”Yes, I amThe man gasped. And fell to the ground...

Lucky Letter by Mary Ellen RaymoIt’s so dark inside the envelope. I can’t see much except for a big red classified stamp when the light shines through the paper. I wonder when I’ll see light again. Last thing I heard before they shipped me off was that I was going into secure storage in the White House for in case of an emergency. I only have one charge left, so they’re saving it for something big.

Nuclear war I hope. Those are always fun charges. I think I’m where they got the term “Nuclear Button."

I find myself falling down a long metal tube, and I land on a shifting pile of something. My envelope is picked up and shaken; then everything goes dark.

There’s a ripping sound, and my envelope is torn open. I’m taken out and held in a rough, calloused hand. It’s a regular mailman, not a government worker. I’m in the wrong place.

“I wish I knew what you did”, the mailman says.

“Is that your wish? Because I have only one left, and no, asking for more wishes does not work. By the way, I’m supposed to be at the White House.”

“Well what can you do?”

“Anything, provided it doesn’t break the fourth wall or laws of physics.”

A greedy look appears in his eyes. “What about eliminating someone from existence? Can you do that?”

“Only by conventional means. Hitmen, a fire, a crash. I can’t simply will them away.”

“Fine. I wish for my boss to disappear.” He presses my button, and there’s a roar from upstairs.

A Remote Lament By Kassidy KesslerWhat have I done…I wanted to live a simple life… one where the most I ever did was turn up the volume and change the channel. But ever since the postman came and granted the household a wish, I have become a monster…My power is unmatched, greater than all, yet I have no control. I’m paralyzed, forced to watch as the youngest child picks me up and demands for a tub of ice cream. If that was all they had wished, then I would have been fine… but it wasn’t. The requests and demands of the humans became greater… darker. The father steals me away.I never wanted this. Any of it. I watch in pure terror as the father presses a button and opens the vault. He takes everything, leaving the cell bare. Police rush around and try to stop him. He deletes them from existence with a press of his thumb. They wither from this world and never return…Make them stop; I beg you. The greed and lust of humans will never be quenched. They will never leave me be.Please… save me.

The Person in the Remote by Evelyn Swiderski I was transformed into this remote years ago. Some say I’m like a genie...others don’t think so. I have laid in the abandoned castle's mailbox for years, before a postal service worker suddenly opened it up. She seemed really sad… she was very pretty, and I wanted to help.“Why are you sad?” I asked, surprising her.“AH! Oh.. I’ve lost everything I love. My family is so hard on me… What about you? she asked.“I control everything, but I’ve been stuck here for years. I used to be a person, but there’s no hope for me anymore.” I said sadly.“Can you grant me a wish? Just one?” “Sure” I sighed, I already know how’s this is gonna go.“I wish for you to be you again” she smiled. I began to transform into my true self, and I was finally happy again. The girl and I spent our lives together, and one day, she was happy too.

The Oblivio by Cora McGrailMy life started out in darkness. Not like birth darkness, just plain old black. I felt everything yet nothing surrounding me in the oblivion. After waiting for what seemed like eons, I heard a light snap of the fingers, and I was in the hands of some creature (and a pretty ugly one, I’ll be honest). It had weird brown stalks growing out of the top of it and bulgy glass spheres in the center of the topmost extremity. It stared down at me, making me feel very uncomfortable. “Alright, there’s your one wish, Mr. Postal-service-worker-who-never-told-me-his-name-because-he’s-too-paranoid-about-the-FBI-finding-him, a remote that controls everything,” I heard a familiar genie say. The unmistakable poof of his disappearance sounds, and I’m left alone with this thing. Holding me like a glass orb in its hands, it slowly starts an incline into the habitat-like structure before him. The tall points of it reminded me of something a tiny, chirping voice told me in The Oblivion. I think it was called a castle or something like that. Terrified of what he would control, since I can control literally ANYTHING, I wait for the worst of the situation to come...

Lonely Times by Cadence BellIt gets lonely sometimes.I always sit here on the recliner and wait for him to come home.But even when he comes home, he doesn’t listen. I try to say “Hello there!”But he just puts down his bag and pushes my buttons.With every button pushed, another slice of pain.He’ll open the door, then throw me on Frederick, the couch. It always hurts to be thrown around, but Frederick says, “Its okay. It’s better than when someone sits on me.”Ned, the one pushing my buttons, is a postman, but he never mails my letters. Its as if he can't see them.It’s lonely here, only having Fredrick…

"Something happened this one time and it was in an old building" by Lloyd Gholson“So I was just sittin’ there, right, and this one nerd with a package just trips and falls over the hedge right outside my window. Oooh and this window ain’t no normal, boring window either. It was one of those huge tall windows that go from the floor all the way to the ceiling or whatever. Anyways, so this nerd trips and falls over the hedge, which seems pretty harsh, fact bein’ this hedge was like four, four an’ a half feet tall and the guy couldn’t ve been taller than 5’9”. Anyhoo, he just straight crashes through my window, and lemme tell ya...this was one nice window. Anyways, so he trips and falls right onto me big red button that does like whatever, and it just messed up my whole day right there. So this guy, right, after he trips and falls and whatnot, just presses the one button that does whatever, and apparently this dude just wanted some pie so the button that does whatever just makes the pie right then and there, and by there I mean right abouts three feet above his upturned face, with the pie facing straight upside down. Also, it was a really goopy pie for whatever reason; I guess he just craved some banana cream. Anyways, so it just falls right onto his face, and it was the funniest thing, right. Aight, so that’s pretty much it.”

I Am by Olivia GibbonsI am the remote that controls everything. Well not everything but almost everything. It all started in the 1800s. I was suddenly given life by an insane scientist who was trying to make a pizza, but I guess I was a pretty good outcome because he didn't throw me away. In the house I was used for everything and anything! Pizzas, children, backpacks, money, etc. But one day, it all changed. I was in this house 'til 2019 when I was dropped in the mailbox! Don’t ask me how, but it happened! The mail worker picked me up and drove away from the little 1800s house I have known my entire life. We almost crashed after she heard me scream, but we soon became best friends! We drove across the country delivering mail! I got to see the world, and in exchange, I had to fulfill her one wish. I am the remote that controls everything, so I helped control her love life. Soon, she had two lovely children and a wonderful husband. We still travel the country, but not as mail carriers. I don’t understand why Susie, the mail carrier, died her hair grey! She says it's age, but I don't think humans die. Well, I’ve never seen a human die. They go to places called cemeteries where they probably have parties for the rest of their lives! I want to go to these parties one day… I soon learned that I’m the remote who can control everything, everything but death.]

Destruction Because of Me by Abby HammondI don’t know how I got in the hands of this monster. Actually, scratch that; he wished for me. The remote that controls everything. One minute he is just delivering mail, and the next minute, he is destroying the world. And he’s using me to do so. I feel like I’m being held accountable for his reign. This castle, the servants, and the world didn’t deserve this postal service worker ruling the world, while at the same time, bringing it to its end.

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