This is not a joke (well I don’t think the inventor was intending for it
to be one, anyway). Someone just patented a
jump rope with no rope. He has put
movable weights in handles that you hold and as you move your arms they
simulate the feeling of a jump rope.

“But why jump
rope without a rope? It's perfect for
the clumsy, Clancy [the inventor] said. ``If you are still jumping, you're
still using your legs as well as your arms, and getting the cardiovascular
workout. You just don't have to worry about tripping on the rope.'' It is also good for mental institutions and
prisons where rope is a suicide risk, said Clancy, who works as a laundry
coordinator in a state prison. And low ceiling fans aren't a hazard any more,
he said.”

Call me crazy,
but why not just skip this invention and jump in place – for nothing (and, I
believe, it would still be safe for the suicidal)?

Now I’m an avid believer
in keeping an open mind and exploring things from multiple perspectives.