NATO Unleashes Amphibious YUGO

Serbian forces were stunned yesterday to find that the technology that fueled the Yugo had been turned on their people and used in specially designed attack rovers which laid waste to the Serbian military infrastructure.

Disguised as the familiar and friendly national icon, the super Yugos, dubbed "Yugonauts " by the American military, plowed through the helpless Serbian troops and encampments, shredding not only the little tents they were in, butalso their dignity.

"Weknewwe could make the Yugo better; faster; stronger" announced NATO general Jacques Chirac.

The bombing campaign included a secret operation in which NATO military experts, working undercover, infiltrated the former Yugo plants, stealing engineering plans, blueprints, parts, and as one agent said "just about everything we could find there.

The anonymous source explained the strategy. "This operation is intended to damage the Yugoslav morale...to crush nationalism andself-esteem. We hope the sight ofanattack column of bastardized stealth Yugos, equipped with the latest weapons of death, will leave them stunned. So far, our plan is working as planned."

Kosovar refugees confirmed the reports: "We saw at least fifty of them come rumbling out of the hills. They looked like an armada of death."