About two and a half years ago, a good friend of my sister and I made a permanent decision in response to a short-term problem. He was an extraordinary young man who drew and extraordinarily bad deck of cards in life.

A couple of nights ago, I found a short essay I had written for school in honor of him after he left us. There are too many people who feel the same way he did.There are too many people who opt out because no one noticed.

Going Unnoticed

In Loving Memory of Dee M.

When a pure light goes out, the world feels its sorrow. Dee was one of the purist, and it hurts to know he was in enough pain to rip himself from those he loved and who loved him dearly. No one should be pushed to that point.

Truthfully, it’s difficult to even know where to begin in describing such a beautiful soul. Words don’t seem sufficient enough. Dee spent his entire life making sure he had a smile on his face in hopes of invoking a more positive attitude from everyone around him. To those he befriended, he instantly became family. He was lovable in practically every aspect. He laughed when nobody else could. He wiped your tears, even if he hardly knew you. He risked his life to save a stranger without regret. Dee lived to make people happy.

Nevertheless, it wasn’t enough. Our society has crumbled, and the weight of the wreckage crushed him. His life changed dramatically within a year, and he lost himself in the process. He spiraled into nothingness.

Still, Dee smiled. Because he smiled, no one noticed. Smiles mean happiness, right? That is the delusion our world has drowned itself in. Society is so focused on the people who don’t speak out and make their voice known. They focus on those with the “typical image” of a broken soul. The ones who are truly broken go out like stars. They smile their brightest as the pain reaches its peak, though they died long before then. Then they disappear without a trace, and it goes unnoticed. For that reason, the people who feel this way wind up feeling more hopeless than before. They feel they have more reason to keep their hardships to themselves. They try to fight their demons alone, and they fail.

To be frank, these tendencies need to change. The clothes you wear, the music you listen to, and the activities you like—within reason—do not make you depressed or suicidal. Many people who are viewed in this way are some of the brightest and most content people. The true issues lie within more discreet manners. They hide behind the eyes that have dimmed. They hide behind the smile.