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Sunday, April 11, 2010

The story may not be exactly as ours but it does apply to us in the meaning behind it and the concept most certainly does for majority of us, mothers, fathers, career people, students and kids alike. It really makes you think long and hard and makes you look DEEP into yourself...

Thank You Grace......keep them rolling in.

F A M I L Y

I banged into a stranger as he passed by, 'Oh excuse me please' was my reply.

He said, 'Please excuse me too; I couldn't see you coming.'

We were very polite, this stranger and I. We went on our way and we said goodbye.

But at home a different story is told, How we treat our loved ones, young and old.

Later that day, when I went to kitchen to take dinner...
My son stood beside me very still
When I turned, I nearly knocked him down.
'Move out of the way,' I said with a frown.
He walked away, his little heart broken.
I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken

While I lay awake in bed,

A small voice came to me and said,

'While dealing with a stranger,

common courtesy you use,

but the family you love, you seem to abuse.

Go and look on the kitchen floor,

You'll find some flowers there by the door.

Those are the flowers he brought for you.
He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise'

By this time, I felt very small,

And now my tears began to fall.

I quietly went and knelt by his bed;

'Wake up, little one, wake up,' I said 'Are these the flowers you picked for me?

'He smiled, 'I found them, out by the tree. I picked 'em because they're pretty like you.

I knew you'd like them, especially the blue.'

I said, 'I'm very sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn't have yelled at you that way.' I said, 'I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue.'

FAMILY

Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days; But the family we left behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. Come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than into our own family, an unwise investment indeed, don't you think? So what is behind the story?

Thursday, April 1, 2010

I'm at a crossroad in my life. I recently turned 50 and I am a divorcee. When my first daughter left for Uni, it was like a loss because of her hysterical loud laughter and bubbly ways. My life had been all about my kids for more than two decades. Even though I did not show it, it was hard to see the first one leave the nest. No one really knew how I felt because I was good at hiding it then and only one good friend knew what I was going through. I was home 24/7 for them...I gave up my career to be home for them from the start. My kids had been my life, my focus and my priority for years even though I did falter towards the last few years of my marriage with being too much at the computer. It was more of an escape from reality for many reasons which only some people can and wish to understand.

My second daughter commutes to and fro from college due to her anxiety attacks and fears that evolved from a few fainting spells. My youngest is doing her Form 3 this year and in a couple of years she too will be leaving the nest. They live with their father but I see them often and we communicate whenever we can... I love and miss my kids but they know that even though I am not in the same house, I am always here whenever they need me unless when I am ill. I live just 30 minutes drive away from them. I am so glad I got to be here long enough to see them grow up to be beautiful swans. Their leaving the nest and me living separate, weird as it may sound...is a gift. I cherish now that they will leave the nest and become their own adults separate from me.

I love seeing my kids become independent adults with lives that don't revolve around me. They have their own hopes, ambitions and dreams...they have discovered their individual personalities. I am not central anymore. If I died now, I know my kids would be okay, they have lots of dreams and lots to live for, they could move on without much pain especially with a father that loves and supports them very much. He will always put them first in his life. They love me, but they would be able to manage without me now. I am grateful for that.

This time in my life has also opened new doors for me. The first 3 decades of my life involved me growing up and becoming an independent adult. The next two decades were about being a wife and mother. Raising my kids was my priority; my needs didn't matter so much in the earlier years.

I have come to realize my remaining time here can be mine. I've fulfilled obligations the first 5 decades of my life. Now I can focus on me...And it's okay. This past one year has been extremely difficult for me to move on in life. I was holding on to threads of the past. Today I have made a serious decision to move on in life and to deal with my pains and ailments positively....and to treasure the gifts that have been bestowed upon me i.e. Life...my Faith and the people that really do love me unconditionally in all aspects. I am finding solace in my Faith and my heart is filled with hope of what I need most....and that is Love and emotional support. Whatever time I have in this life will not be taken for granted anymore ...I will value it much more...each precious moment of it. Healthy people should not take life for granted...life is uncertain. I now realize that Life is so precious and too short to dwell in the past or to get depressed over hopeless situations.

The many crossroads in our lives can be quite painful, but there are always new opportunities for growth and happiness, inshaAllah (God Willing). Keep me in your prayers so that I may be positive, hopeful and have the strength and courage to move forward and live life (for whatever is left of it) as I should.

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Hello!

It's been an interesting journey through life with learning, living and loving....I cherish every moment. My Moto in Life : Be Free, Be Educated. Be Aware, Be Alive. Be a Winner, Be a Friend. Be a Survivor, Be Persistent. Be Yourself...Just BE! ~ @Nur Diyanah Magness 2006-2015

Favourite Quotes

"Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it."~ Harvey Mackay

"I believe everything happens for a reason! People change so you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so that you will eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes, good things fall apart, so better things can fall together" ~ Marilyn Monroe

Dreams!

I have been happy, tho' in a dream. I have been happy- and I love the theme: Dreams! in their vivid coloring of life, As in that fleeting, shadowy, misty strife Of semblance with reality, which brings - To the delirious eye, more lovely things. Of Paradise and Love- and all our own! Than young Hope in his sunniest hour hath known. - Edgar Allan Poe