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Stephen Carpenter was born on August 3, 1970 in Sacramento, California to an American father and a Mexican mother.[2] He has a sister named Marci. He grew up in the Sacramento area and pursued many hobbies, including skateboarding.

When Carpenter was 15 years old, he was hit by a car while skateboarding. He used a wheelchair for several months. It was at this point that he began teaching himself guitar by playing along with bands such as Anthrax, Stormtroopers of Death and Metallica.[3] It has been reported that the driver paid Carpenter a cash settlement that allowed the band to purchase equipment,[3][4][5] but drummer Abe Cunningham commented in an interview that this was "a myth about how our band was started."[6]

Carpenter attended McClatchy High School with future band mates Chino Moreno and Abe Cunningham. They were childhood friends and remained friends through the skateboarding scene in Sacramento.[3] When Moreno found out Carpenter played guitar, he set up a jam session with Cunningham and the three began playing regularly in Carpenter's garage circa 1989. After playing with several bassists, the band settled on Chi Cheng and within two years the band began playing club shows and later expanded their playing territory to San Francisco and Los Angeles where they played shows alongside bands such as Korn.[5][7]

His relationship with Deftones lead singer and band mate Chino Moreno has been recorded as being fraught at times. Apparently, recording of Saturday Night Wrist was protracted due to their "warfare".[8] With regards to musical tastes, Saturday Night Wrist being described as "more aggressive" equated to it being "more aggressive for him [Chino]"; Carpenter said he'd "definitely be glad to take it to the next level, but that's asking too much right now."[9]

Stephen also plays drums. In an interview with Guitar.com he reported that he likes drums more than he likes guitars, "as far as when it comes to creating the ideas."[1] Also on his drumming abilities, he said:

"I do play drums. But I play drums like a guitar player, if that makes any sense. I don't play drums like a drummer would, where a drummer has the ability to somehow manipulate that kit into different dimensions. I can't do that. I play to the riffs and I'm pretty straight forward. I could pull off playing drums in a little jam session, but when it comes to really writing songs as a drummer, I don't have it. To me, a tempo could be the same beat in every song, when it comes down to it. Really, you're just changing the tempos to back the riff."[1]

Carpenter currently uses Dunlop .011-.069 gauge strings. He also uses Dunlop 1 mm Tortex picks which are black with a custom logo. Carpenter's current rig consists of only a Fractal Audio Axe-FX II running straight into the venue's PA system. He also uses an Electro-Harmonix .22 Caliber pedal power amp for powering his monitors.[18]