02 May, 2011

I was reminded of this piece of fiction earlier today in response to last night's fiction broadcast:

Morris Fletcher: You guys are the Lone Gunmen, aren't you? You guys are my heroes. I mean look at the crap you print.

Byers: We uncover the truth.

Morris Fletcher: The truth? That's what's so great about you monkeys. Not only do you believe the horse pucky we create, you broadcast it as well. I mean look at this!

[headline reads: "Saddam testing mandroid army in Iraqi desert."]

Morris Fletcher: There is no Saddam Hussein. This guy's name is John Gillnitz, we found him doing dinner theatre in Tulsa. Did a mean "King and I." Plays good ethnics.

Ringo Langly: Are you trying to say that Saddam Hussein is a goverment plant?

Morris Fletcher: I'm saying I invented the guy. We set him up in '79. He rattles his saber whenever we need a good distraction. Ah... if you boys only knew how many of your stories I dreamed up while on the pot.