QUIZ: Decorate Your Dorm Room and We’ll Tell You Which Stu Food You Are

By now, DePaul’s freshman class has settled into their new dorms and are used to pretending to like and appreciate their roommates’ weird, often-greasy lifestyle habits. Once the unfamiliarity has worn off, most first-years turn their attention to their own section of living space and begin to question the interior design choices they made before the school year started: Did my dad assemble this IKEA desk chair correctly? Is my paisley comforter from Target stylish enough? What impression does my Keurig leave on the room?

In order to ease some of that uncertainty, The Black Sheep is giving you the chance to embark on the most exciting fictional shopping spree of your life! Decorate your dorm room with your design preferences and we’ll tell you which disgusting, vomit-inducing Stu food you are! On your mark! Get set! Shop!

The perfect desk chair:

One that can handle huge piles of my dirty laundry

One with feminine curves, just like me

One that has wheels for easy mobility!

Just a big fucking bean bag

Correct!

Wrong!

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The posters on my walls are:

All of Audrey Hepburn! Love that classy biotch.

Nonexistent. I only hang tapestries.

Ripped and torn. I used one as a napkin the other day.

School-related! Periodic tables and such. I’m such a nerd ;-P

Correct!

Wrong!

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If personified, your preferred bedspread would say:

“I was purchased for $440 at an Urban Outfitters and reek of weed.”

“I am washed every two weeks on the nose!”

“I am mostly used to wipe jizz off after an intense jack-off session.”

“I am pink and fluffy and fabulous.”

Correct!

Wrong!

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Lofted or unlofted bed?

Lofted! More space for storage!

Lofted! I need an elevated surface to stand on when I hang up my dreamcatchers.