Agh! Pretty blah episode for the big Top 20 announcement in Vegas. Here’s the 20-second recap: Most of Thursday’s guys were unmemorable and/or bad, and it was painfully obvious due to the judges’ scripted comments who’d been pre-selected to go through. Randy is still looking for “moments,” Nicki Minaj knows what everyone who “wants to make it out of the hood” FEELS LIKE, and Mariah Carey wants every contestant to know SHE has loved them from the very beginning.

And now for the longer version….

ELIMINATED

Bryant Tadeo – Why this stranger-‘til-now, a Hawaiian department store employee, was shown the door is still a mystery. The crowd loved him, he seemed like a genuinely nice guy, and he lent a beautiful tone to “New York State of Mind.” Nicki Minaj graciously took some time off from her busy schedule of throwing grotesque side-eyes to tell Bryant “Babe. Ummmm. I loved that last note you did… I didn’t like anything else,” and Randy volunteered that the song “never quite went there for me.” Mariah attempted to explain the crowd’s enthusiasm: “I think what people responded to is the fact that you sounded professional – the tonality of your voice.” And?! Shouldn’t that be a good thing?

Sorry Bryant! Next time try living somewhere near a hurricane.

David Willis – The judges immediately ganged up on David for his song choice, a sped-up, bluesy rendition of Peggy Lee’s “Fever.” After Nicki learned David was married, she bleated an aggressively over-it “HI, WIFE” and suggested David sounded like a kid who’d just received a guitar for Christmas, playing poorly in front of his family. Just, no. Rude! I wasn’t blown away, but I hadn’t remembered David from any other point in the season, and I thought the uptempo cover was pretty cool considering we rarely see anything like it on Idol. The overall effect reminded me of the True Blood opening credits, jangly and dark but also fun. I was into it!

Farewell, David! How dare you even try. After all, a Black Guy With Guitar could be even more potentially deadly than the white version!