Monday, March 5, 2012

When we left Windsor at the end of Part 1 (the “Fall Down Classic” in November), there were 15 DAC members (and me!) storming the front lines of squash court combat. Many survived the carnage, but alas casualties of war are simply a fact of life and are expected, so we do need as many reinforcements as possible! Part 2 is upon us…

Keep in mind that during the recent DAC Classic, they shipped 28 troops into our territory, and many of them succeeded in their missions. With all the special op training some of you have been doing, it’s time to retake some of that terrain. Infiltration is unsophisticated: hike 1 mile south until to reach the raging torrent of the Detroit River. Once there, navigate your way through the already built foxhole, where your most difficult task is to get pass the vicious Canadian guards on the other side that will stop at nothing to halt your progress. Use the code word “Squash” when questioned – this should miraculously open doors. (Word of warning: DO NOT use that code word when creeping back onto home soil – that will only spark of a barrage of more questioning, searching and probing.)

Once passed that check-point, hike another mile and half south(ish) through urban landscape and using your high-tech global positioning systems you should be able to discover the well camouflaged Windsor Squash Club – the trench warfare of the squash world. Get racquet-weapons at the ready and… attack!

Skirmishes will be separated into A; B; C; D; 40+; 50+; Doubles A; Doubles B and Doubles Mixed categories. Click on the poster for more details – there will be beer to consume to either ease the pain of defeat or enhance to ecstasy of victory. You must register voluntarily by March 16 – don’t make me enforce conscription! So get mobilized, represent, and join me as we invade Canada!