Alec Baldwin’s kooky accused stalker came to court with a grab bag of colorful excuses for being late yesterday, including claiming that her Mercedes had been in a car accident — despite it later appearing unscratched.

Montrealer Genevieve Sabourin also told the judge that the financial burden of commuting to Manhattan Criminal Court for appearances has forced her to seek lodging at the Marydell Faith and Life Center, a camp run by nuns in Nyack.