I have a Slate piece this morning on the subject. It's got 1069, III, Mary R., Misteri Nigger, Santa Claus (plus Santa Robert Clause), Koriander, They, and even Darren QX [pronounced "Lloyd"] Bean!. (I use the period after the exclamation point advisedly.) Check it out.

The article also prompted some more submissions from readers. Chris Jenkins and Kevin Wells e-mailed me about Sheppard v. Speir (Ark. App. 2004), involves litigation between two unmarried parents over a child's name (a topic I didn't cover in my Slate piece). The name was "Weather'By Dot Com Chanel Fourcast Sheppard," selected by the mother; the father, a TV weatherman, sued for custody of the child, got it, and tried to change the name to Samuel Charles Speir. The question was whether Samuel Charles Speir was so unusual a name that it should be rejected.

No, wait, let me check my notes. OK, the question was about Weather'By Dot Com Chanel Fourcast, and the appellate opinion provides this excerpt from an exchange between the trial judge and the mother:

The Court: I simply do not understand why you named this child — his legal name is Weather'by Dot Com Chanel Fourcast Sheppard. Now, before you answer that, Mr. — the plaintiff in this action is a weatherman for a local television station.

Sheppard: Yes.

The Court: Okay. Is that why you named this child the name that you gave the child?

Sheppard: It — it stems from a lot of things.

The Court: Okay. Tell me what they are.

Sheppard: Weather'by — I've always heard of Weatherby as a last name and never a first name, so I thought Weatherby would be — and I'm sure you could spell it b-e-e or b-e-a or b-y. Anyway, Weatherby.

The Court: Where did you get the "Dot Com"?

Sheppard: Well, when I worked at NBC, I worked on a Teleprompter computer.

The Court: All right.

Sheppard: All right, and so that's where the Dot Com [came from]. I just thought it was kind of cute, Dot Com, and then instead of — I really didn't have a whole lot of names because I had nothing to work with. I don't know family names. I don't know any names of the Speir family, and I really had nothing to work with, and I thought "Chanel"? No, that's stupid, and I thought "Shanel," I've heard of a black little girl named Shanel.

The Court: All right. Now, do you have some objection to him being renamed Samuel Charles?

Sheppard: Yes.

The Court: Why? You think it's better for his name to be Weather'by Dot Com Chanel ... Fourcast, spelled F-o-u-r-c-a-s-t? And in response to that question, I want you to think about what he's going to be — what his life is going to be like when he enters the first grade and has to fill out all [the] paperwork where you fill out — this little kid fills out his last name and his first name and his middle name, okay? So I just want — if your answer to that is yes, you think his name is better today than it would be with Samuel Charles, as his father would like to name him and why. Go ahead.

Sheppard: Yes, I think it's better this way.

The Court: The way he is now?

Sheppard: Yes. He doesn't have to use "Dot Com." I mean, as a grown man, he can use whatever he wants.

The Court: As a grown man, what is his middle name? Dot Com Chanel Fourcast?

Sheppard: He can use Chanel, he can use the letter "C." ...

The court of appeals finished with, "we hold that the trial court did not err in determining that it was in the child's best interest to change his name."

Robert Schwartz also mentions professional comedian Woody Volcano Viagra, but this sporting event I'm running here operates on a strictly amateur basis.

UPDATE: From Patricia Reardon comes the case of Romanceo Sir Tasty Maxibillion. Romanceo -- er, Adrian Scott Williams -- lost, because he was a felon and the state persuaded the court that its "legitimate need to identify Williams by his current name constituted sufficient cause ... to deny Williams' petition."

It's too bad you didn't have space to discuss my favorite name change case, re. "Steffi Owned Slave." The court, in rejecting the request, expands at (very interesting) length on the history of slavery law in New York: In re Bobrowich, 2003 WL 230701 (N.Y.City Civ.Ct. January 06, 2003).

I often wonder about perfectly normal names that have been ruined. I knew a political science professor named Ronald McDonald (so named years before the commercial icon, but a bad idea anyway). There was a federal judge named George Washington, who used to tell stories about the looks he'd get after registering at hotels with his attractive blonde wife as "Mr. &Mrs. George Washington." I don't know how common a last name "Hitler" is in Germany, but I imagine few of that last name chose the common first name "Adolph" for their sons. (The tv series "NYPD Blue" featured as a recurring character a narcoleptic comedian named Vic Hitler, Jr.) And what Einstein would have the nerve to name his son Albert? I doubt that Tom Arnold would name his son Benedict, even if he were a big fan of the current Pope. I remember a case brought by one Abraham Lincoln against the United States -- a postal employment matter, if memory serves.

Recently in New Mexico the Court of Appeals upheld the rejection of "F--- Censorship" (without the dashes, of course). The petitioner's name was (and still is) Variable (and before that it was Snaphappy Fishsuit Mokiligon).

I could understand not allowing a felon to change his name to John Smith, but why not Romanceo Sir Tasty Maxibillion? I would think having an extremely unusual name would make it easier to keep track of him.

I get the rational state interest in "letters only, less than a hundred characters, no numerals, and punctuation limited to hyphens and apostrophes"
as "rational place and manner" restrictions dictated by logistical practicality (and I can personally attest there is apparently commercial record-keeping software out there which doesn't even permit hyphens).

Mr. Maxibillion's, case however, like the "prisoner suing under false name" case noted earlierlooks to me more like plain old judicial pique: "That annoying felon is annoying us again, and wasting judicial time..." As noted, presumably in this modern day and age, the fact of his new name could be noted all over his existing criminal record, and in various databases; it would seem to make him EASIER to find than when he was "Scott Williams".

I've had three different people (none of whom know eachother) swear to me that a friend of a friend worked at a hospital where some mother names her twins Orangejello and Lemonjello, so I understand if you're skeptical, but...

There was a girl in my school e-mail and phone directory named, I kid you not, Anita Dick. While I never met her, I had friends that were in classes with her. Seriously, Anita Dick. I mean, for a second, I though Bart Simpson had played a prank on our new dean, Moe Sizlac.

I recall quite a few people whose names, as recorded on birth certificates, were entirely initials, eg: "J. D. Smith". I think this was a common practice in the south. The practice was at least common enough that some forgotten 1950s issue of Reader's Digest included a joke about a recruit whose name was eventually recorded in Army records as "Ronly Bonly Jones". Seems that in attempting to convince recruiters that his name consisted of initials only, he wrote "R.(only) B.(only) Jones".

That Readers Digest folklore is at least legally consistent with the 2006 case Darren Lloyd Bean v. Superior Court from which Prof. Volokh quotes in TFA:

We do not find a legal distinction between a period inside a word, a hyphen between words, an apostrophe in a word, and an exclamation point at the end of a word.

I also understand the skepticism. Especially when I heard that some minority woman gave her baby a name that implies she (the mom) was stupid.

But I can personally vouch for one "Harry Dyck" whom I knew in grad school. Parents do stuff like that to kids. But why? I would have changed my name to Van Dyck the day I turned 18.

I also know of a colleague names Michael Hunt, who goes by "Mike." I'd go with Mickey, personally. Perhaps I'm shallow. If so, fine. But Hoosierwife and I went over possible nicknames, initials, and so forth extensively before naming our children.

Homer: Your honor? I'd like to sue the producers of "Police Cops" for twenty million dollars for improper use of my name.
Judge Snyder: Court finds in favor of "Police Cops". Next case.
Homer: Then I'd like to legally change my name.
Judge: What name would you prefer?
Homer: Any of these will be fine.
Judge: Hmm... Hercules Rockefeller, Rembrandt Q. Einstein, Handsome B. Wonderful? Huh, I'm going to give you the only name you spelt correctly. From this day forward, your name shall be .....
Lisa: Max Power?
Homer: Dynamic, isn't it?
Bart: I love it, Max.
Marge: You changed your name without consulting me?
Homer: That's the way Max Power is, Marge. Decisive, uncompromising, and rude!
Abe: Oh, wait a minute. The family name is my legacy to you. I got it from my father, and he got it from his father, and he traded a mule for it! And that mule went on to save spring break.

In a court my wife made the draft for a sentence on this case:a woman called Linda, in spanish , pretty , came criying . she wanted her name changed because she was ugly. Eery time she s answer with her name people , both men and women smiled.She came to ask for a name change , not allowed in the law but usually acepted by judges in cases of transexuality or offensive names. At the end the judge allowed the change

Apparently, there was a guy in NYC named Adolf Hitler. He was Jewish. He refused to have his name changed because he had it first. Also, Winston Churchill once urged an American writer of the same name to change his. The American replied that he had it first and urged the Englishman to do it, instead. End of correspondence.
I know an pharmacist named Osama. It has been quite a while since he heard an original joke on the topic.

I had heard that the Churchills reached an agreement that Sir Winston would use his middle initial in all his writings--Winston S. Churchill. The American writer's novels to this day are routinely mistaken for the work of Sir Winston by owners of antique stores, but Sir Winston wrote only one novel, distinguishable by the "Winston S. Churchill."

I'm surprised no one has yet mention what is quite possibly the worst baby name of all time: Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K. Look it up on google. Apparently the first name is pronounced (Your Highness).

this reminds me of a story from the late 60s or early 70s. a woman sued the printers of a (the?) california telephone books because they refused to print her name in the book. her name was "magnolia thunderpussy". She cited that they had already printed the name "rumple foreskin" with no problem.

There's a local businessman who uses the name Dick A. Rose. Yes, not "Richard", and with the middle initial.

I also went to school with a trumpet major named Miles Davis. When he did his senior recital, my girlfriend got all excited: "Miles Davis is going to be at the Music School!" "Er, not that Miles Davis."

1. When my late friend Bill Maddex went to Eugene South High School (Eugene OR) back in the early 80's, Dick Schmuck was employed as a coach. He and his wife used to send out Christmas cards "Merry Christmas from the Schmucks"

2. Absolutely Nobody ran as an independent candidate for Governor of Washington in 1992. As I recall, he had to go to court to get on the ballot.

3. Had a student quite a few years ago whose name was Vardit Dvash, or in English, Rose Honey.