Discussion

Comments

aesythe

Jun 17, 2019

Without the fantasy or talking animals, there's sort of a modern nursery rhyme-feel to this. Your rhyming scheme is down-to-earth and your tone is wonderfully uplifting for the reader - while your character is lifted also! I especially like the way you contrasted the colors of yellow and blue using the feelings associated with both of them.

Kittykatruff

Jun 18, 2019

Thank you!

I_Love_Poetry

SilverGoose

Jun 17, 2019

The first stanza was especially vivid for me. I love the snippets of images from the lines "Wingtips barely missing / Flowers, twigs, amber tree sap" The "amber tree sap" is specific enough to paint a picture, but also universal enough that your reader will know what you mean.