For Christmas, Truman got … (drum roll) … Truman, a chew toy version of the University of Missouri mascot. Truman the dog is named after Truman the MU mascot, not the president who dropped two big ones on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It’s an important distinction we highlight every time someone asks us our dog’s name, and usually kills the initial heartfelt buzz of meeting him. Especially if the greeter is a Democrat.

So in the photo above, T is essentially gnawing on himself.

It’s very meta and enough to make you get a fourth helping of spiked egg nog, comrades: “There goes Aunt Thelma again, stumbling around the backyard, screaming about the NSA and Obama…”

If the real Chairman were around, he would sneer at your consumerism masked by religious dogma as you and your progeny tear each other apart to get at your decadent Xbox games and Apple-compatible products. Alas he is not, so even he can’t prevent our renegade D.C.-based Politburo from wishing you – and our warriors down range – a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Here’s nutty Mariah Carey to present this week’s Hump Day Song of the Week.