/adv/ Advice

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Is suicide ever the solution?

I have been living for a good 20 years now. With an academic talent I've created this bubble of going to lucrative jobs and earning a place in society. But with bipolar II disorder and horrible social anxiety this has proven challenging. Of course at times it's bearable, but with a horrible depressive period I rationalize and plan my suicide constantly. Now this is not for emo reasons. I have not had a tough childhood, on the contrary I would say it's been above average. I do not have any anger towards anyone, and I don't take pity in myself. I'm just being realistic. The way things are headed, I'll be living off of welfare for the better part of my life without ever being able to contribute to society. Love affairs have come and gone, usually ended because of the mood swings accompanying my disorder. Friendships likewise. I don't feel like there's any reason to prolong this existence. And from prior experiences I can tell I cause more harm than good in my family and in my social circles if you can call them that.

So my question is. Is suicide justifyable in any case? Having tried for the better part of 5 years to cope with my problems through medication and therapy I don't exactly see myself improving.

Any input is much appreciated, thank you for your time

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:09:38 No.11497175

>>11497138
There have been so many times when I wished this one person who had entered my life briefly had not killed themselves. Living with 2+ family members with pretty severe Bipolarity, I know that it's incredibly difficult to deal with and I applaud you for going on this long.

You're still young, and I think there's hope for you yet. It is your life, however, and I haven't any right to say over what you do with yours. I understand that you're coming from a logical standpoint rather an emotional one, which makes this question a bit harder to approach than usual.

I just like thinking of it like this:
>live for those you have met and those you have yet to meet.

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:16:53 No.11497220

>>11497175
the idea of hurting people who are close has really been the thing that's made me step down before. As the act of suicide is incredibly narcissistic and while masochistic, also incredibly sadistic. But I still feel it'd be for the better, as the mood swings have created a lot of hostility over the years and I've more or less cut social contact to a minumum. And I don't feel prolonging my own existence just to not bring grief to others is the right way to go either

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:18:27 No.11497228

>>11497138
I disapprove of suicide. Many people who go down that path often have more to live for than they realize. But I also disliked the phrase "It's a permanent solution to a temporary problem". It rings less true once you've graduated high school and your hormones have for the most part stopped being a concoction from Hell.

You've got it rough buddy, like many other people. Some get stuck with a set of genetics that gives them cancer; you've got major bipolar and anxiety, a nasty combo. The human body sure can be fucked up, eh? (I assume that the diagnosis was made by a professional and not yourself).

I wish I could tell you that it gets better. But the mind is the most complex of our organs and through no fault of your own it came out wrong. I don't blame you for wanting to end it all. Life's a bitch even to the average person and it makes no exceptions for those who are suffer a mental issue.

I wish you could find some way to keep on going. You should ask yourself "Have I done my best to deal with it all?". That's what really matters. You are 20, old enough to make tough decisions. It's your life; if you feel it's been long and hard enough, then that is that.

I only hope you can find a measure of peace.

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:19:01 No.11497233

Yes it is a perfectly viable solution in some cases.

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:23:28 No.11497257

I don't have the knowledge of post suicide to tell you if it's the answer or not.

Reincarnation, heaven, hell, stasis, purgatory, simply not existing, any and more options could be true.

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 20:30:37 No.11497293

>>11497228
Have tried a lot of different things. I've experimented with meditation, spirituality. picked up various hobbies. Been rockclimbing, european boxing, fencing, gymnastics even fucking natural bodybuilding. to no avail. I've tried volounteering helping the elderly, younger people but nothing really brought me any direction or sense of belonging or peace. Eventually drowned my head in loose women and drugs, but that made me crash even harder. So running out of ideas at the moment.

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Anonymous 2013-01-19 22:04:19 No.11497755

Hey OP, I'm bipolar II as well... I didn't do well with meds (they fixed the symptoms but slowed me down too much) and therapy is not really that helpful for something that is actually a physical medical problem. Light therapy, however, has worked very well. It's usually used for seasonal affective disorder, but can be used for bipolar. I'm off meds now and it has helped enormously with the depression, my social anxiety, and with my energy levels. If you haven't tried it, it might be a possibility: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dhpc&field-keywords=sad+light. However, it can elevate hypomania, so if that is your main issue, this might not be the best solution.

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