_I hadn't finished yet, the boy took over: - My father? he works all day and has to teach at night, he has no time to play with me... And my mother? She only knows about cooking, doing the laundry, cleaning the floor and complaining... Boring!_The boy was talking than his mother appeared in front of the gate, speak loudly: - What are you doing, child? Going home and having dinner! - So, do you see? - The boy angry - She is always like that, complains all time. Forcing me to eat all day! Boring!_And the boy stood up, said good bye and went back to his home. Both running and speaking: - If I had 2 angels like you, I wouldn't live in this hell like now!_"Boy! You don't understand now. And when you understand... everything seem to be too late...!"

_I was a primary music teacher. During 30 years in job, beside teaching at school, I also taught at home for children whose parents wanted to. In fact, this job was not interesting at all, even when you met the "infant prodigy" from their parents hopes.One year, there was a boy named Bobby, went to my home asking to to learn. At that time, Bobby was 11 years old. I was going to refuse because it's too late to learn piano. But Bobby entreated... Finally, I felt sorry when I heard that his mother's all life hope is to see Bobby became a pianist... Bobby became my student._However, on the first day, I recognized that I brought a heavy responsibility. Bobby was very assiduous, but it seemed to be there's no hope for him on the "music road". His music receptive capacity and rhythm were too bad. But my boring was taken easy when Bobby did correctly all my instruction...

(...) Sometimes, I couldn't keep my angry, said dirty things, even hit Bobby's hands with ruler. Bobby just opened his eyes and look at me, then continued on the piano's keys. When Bobby left, I felt tired..._Time passed, in contract with my thinking, Bobby still went to learn. When I shouted him, he whispered: "Mom can hear I played one day". Through experiences, I was sure that Bobby couldn't be a pianist. I blamed his mother in secret - Why did she force her son to learn piano?_The course performance, my students walked to the stage by turns, but I couldn't find Bobby's sign. I was feeling a little happy, Bobby appeared on the stage with a sadly face, red and swell considerably eyes, ruffled hair, loosely clothes. I couldn't understand why there was a mother could leave her son when he was on the stage like that! But too late, I ignored Bobby and hoped it pass quickly..._But what a strange! The first rhythm vibrated attracted my soul. Bobby played a sadly song he chose which I'd never taught for him. It requested higher capacity to what Bobby had learned. Although it was a child's rhythm, it had soul, plaintive, impetuous. When the last rhythm stopped, all the hall stood up and clapped their hands loudly. Bobby stood up slowly and walked to the microphone: - Do you like this song, mom? - Bobby asked._Everyone looked around to find who was Bobby's mom. Scared of Bobby would make something wrong, behind the side flap, I rushed out and pulled Bobby's hand. A man - I knew he a society protector looked after Bobby after than - approached me and whisper: - Bobby's mom is deaf. All her life, she only want to hear her son play piano. She just "go to Heaven" this morning because cancer and has no time to come to see Bobby perform.

- This is for you, dad! - Mathew Ryan Emrich shouted, raised his hand to the sky. He was nearly 9 years old and being a member of "Small League" team and had just made the first goal._Mr.Mark - Mathew's father - always wanted to be a professional baseball player. He tried too much but never made it come true - Grandfather Chet's wish had been passed to dad._Mark still played for the local team and directed for the children in the area. On 30.7.1985, when Mathew was born, Mark promised to himself that he would passed to Mathew his love of baseball. When Mathew was 4 years old, he hit the ball flew to the neighbor's roof._Mathew's number was 7, the same as his father. He was very excited to be taken care by his father and continued family's tradition. Both of son and father liked the movie named: "Field of wishes" - that movie not only said about baseball, but also about father, son and hopes._But how sad, although believing and trying to against, Mark still couldn't win the cancer. He died when 30. The Sunday Mark died, he went to the hospital "just for checking health". All of the doctors promised that they would let him go to watch his son's first baseball match on the next Monday._Family and friend knew that Mathew would play on the next day, that was the thing his father always wished. But Mathew didn't know the thing he had promised to his mother - Mrs.Sherry - that when he hit successfully the first shot, he would give it to dad, was listened by a higher person from the highest position._A person inferred: "Mathew's wonderful hit can make his father excited and fall out of the cloud - where he is sitting to watch."

_When mom think that I didn't see you hang my first picture on the fridge, I felt like to draw another one._When mom think that I didn't see you feed the fallow cat, I understood that loving animals was a good thing._When mom think that I didn't see you make my favorite cake, I understood that all normal things became magic._When mom think that I didn't see the kiss you gave before sleeping, my boat skied gently on the see of dream, lovely wind._When mom think that I didn't see your tears, I understood that life could bring many sad things but tears would take away sad._Sometimes you think that I didn't see but actually, I saw very much... And I wanted to thank you for all of the things you did when you think that I didn't see, mom...

_Look back, I usually thought, the doctors had had to write a "dead permission" for me when my son died on that day, a part of my body also died._My Andy was 12 years old. During 3 years, he had to against the cancer. He passed valence and many other methods. Sometimes, his situation increased then decreased, decreased then increased. I surprised of his strength. Andy flared up when the ill nearly took his soul away. May be his courage and strength persuaded me about his future or may be I was afraid of facing Andy's dead. But in fact, I always believed that Andy would be fine. He was a boy could collapse any sad things._3 summers passed, Andy and the cancer, were still together to have a picnic with Andy's friends. He liked very much. A week, he could forget the ill and hospital, being a child again. After the third picnic, I took him to the hospital to check health. The information was not good... Doctor made a schedule for the bone marrow_implanting course on the next 2 days at a hospital far away from my house 300 miles. We promptly threw a few things into the suitcase and went...

_One of the things I threw into my suitcase is the present Andy brought from the picnic - the plastic sunlight_catching thing had rainbow form with a glued space to stick on the window. Like other mother, It's my property and I didn't want to leave it._We went to the hospital and began a difficult "test", the doctor said that was the last hope for Andy. We lived there for 7 weeks. It turned out the last 7 weeks for Andy. We never talked to each other about dead - except 1 time. At that time, Andy was very tired and knew that he had no strength to be against for more. He tried to make me understand. He asked me weakly: - Is it hurt when we die, mom?_I was stupefied but I answered honestly: - I don't know. And I don't want to talk about that because you wont die, Andy!_He took my hand and said: - Not yet, but I'm feeling more tired._I knew what he was gonna to say but I ignored and prevented all that terrible things from going in my mind._I always sat for a long time to see Andy sleep. Sometimes I went downtown to buy some cards and letters. I had not too much money and nearly broke. The nurse knew my situation, so they ignored when I slept in Andy's room and ate the remaining food on Andy's tray. But I always managed to collect papers and cards because Andy like receiving letters._The bone marrow_implanting course was a terrible "test". Andy couldn't meet anyone because his immunology capacity was too weak. I could see that Andy was lonely than he ever be...

_Decided to make something for Andy, I began to meet the strangers in the waiting room and asked them: - Could you please send my son a letter?_I explained my situation and gave them a card or paper. In surprised, they did my request and no refuse. They looked at me and saw a mother in hurt._The thing made me surprise is the kind of those people, although they all had they own problems, they spent a little time to write a letter for Andy._Some people only wrote their signature with a soon recover hope. Some people even wrote a letter: "Hello! I'm from Idaho, come here to visit my maternal grandmother in this hospital..." and they wrote fully the page with their story, sometimes invited Andy to visit when he got better. A woman pulled me back and asked: - 2 weeks ago, you asked me to write a letter for your son. Can I write another one?_I sent all those letters to Andy and happy to see him when he read them. Andy had a "high tower" of letters..._One day, I went downtown to buy some cards and saw a rainbow glass was for sale. Remembered the sunlight_catching thing Andy gave me, I thought I had to buy it. It's cost very much money but I took all my money in my purse and hurried to go back to the hospital to show Andy. He lied silently on the bed, he was so weak that he couldn't raise his head on his own. The cushion fell down but a sunlight from a window frame's slit shined slightly slanted to Andy's bed. I putted the glass in Andy's hands and said: - Andy, make a rainbow for me, please!_But he couldn't, he tried to raise his arm but that was out of his strength. He looked at me and said: - Mom, when I feel better, I will made a rainbow that you will never forget..._That was one of the last things Andy said to me. Some hours later, he was in deep of unconscious. I stayed with him in the recover room, massaged him, talked with him, read the letters for him but he didn't wake up. The only sound I could hear is the health_supplying machine's sound. I saw clearly the death's face but I still believed that in the last second, magic could appear and my son would be alive...

_5 days later, the doctors said to me that Andy's brain stopped working and it's time to separate him from the machine which kept he from dead._I asked them if I could carry him. So they brought a swing to the room and when I sat on the swing, they turned off the machine, carried Andy out of the bed and put him in my arms. When they lifted him up, his leg was stuck and thrust aside a plastic bottle on the table next to the bed._I shouted: - Raise the cushion! I want this room is full of light._The nurse hurried to run to the cushion and raise it up._When the cushion was raised up, I saw the sunlight_catching thing had rainbow form was sticked on the window - clearly, It was belong to someone in this room before. I stopped breathe because of surprise. And when the light shined all the room, touched the bottle on the bed, everybody were surprised and stopped to see._The room was full of colorful lights of thousands rainbows, on the wall, the floor, the ceiling, on the blanket around Andy's body when he lied in my arms. The room was lively with many rainbows..._No one could say a word. I looked Andy and he had stopped breathe. Andy had gone but in the hurt was coming, I still felt easy. Andy made a rainbow that he had promised me - the rainbow I couldn't forget and would never forget because it was all Andy's love for me - a mother...

_That was the economic crisis time, everything were very difficult. Mom brought us up on her own in a small inhabitants area in New Westminster. Dad died 5 years ago. We had to live with the help money - called society subsidy nowadays. The Relief Group would gave us clothes - although they were old, they were still beautiful in poor kid's eyes._Remembered, I knew my mom was very hardship for us to go to school. Each morning, she putted a board paper into our shoes because the shoe's soles wore out. When the children came home, mom had cooked the "French style toasted bread". That was the bread fried with a lot of pig's fat. At that time, changing house rapidly was a normal thing with my family. To rent a house, we had to spend $ 25 a month, but mom couldn't afford that. We knew that we would be expelled after Christmas, the first day of new year. That was our hard and sad time but we had no complaint._Christmas was coming, we were given $ 25 from the Society Organization. An inspector came to our house, checked from upstairs to downstairs to make sure that we didn't hide any foods. When he found nothing, he gave a cheque for mom. That was 4 days before Christmas. Mom said that she would spend $ 25 for paying our rent instead of buying food, to make sure that we had a place to live for more. So there would be nothing for Christmas...