Obama's Historic Inauguration Makes People Realize That Presidents Are Inaugurated

Barack Obama's inauguration as the 44th president of the United States is destined to go down in history, not just as the election of the nation's first African American Commander-In-Chief, but as the event that made Americans aware that all new incoming presidents are inaugurated.

"You mean we got one of these things every time a new guy is elected?" said one man incredulously, on his way to the nation's capitol to see what he had previously believed to be a "strange-yet-wonderful African-American ceremony".

He is not alone in his surprise; out of the 50 people we interviewed who were gathered in Washington, D.C. for the historic event, 46 had never even heard of the word "inauguration" before a few days ago. The remaining four were obviously liars.

"Listen, I'm sure they had a small private welcome ceremony for past presidents, like maybe with a cake that said 'Welcome!' on it or something," said Bertha Walton, an annoyed woman, "but you're obviously mistaken if you're going to try and tell me that this in-awgration thing has happened before. This is historic."

Others did not react so belligerently to the news that other presidents have indeed been inaugurated; some, in fact, did not seem particularly shocked to hear the news.

"Hell, I can barely manage to get my ass to the booth to vote half the time, and even then I usually just decide based on what I imagine my dead grandmother is telling me," admitted one sometimes-voter. "So I can't say that I'm stunned that apparently they have this kind of crowd parade thing all the time."

In addition to revealing the ceremonies associated with bringing a new president to the White House, surveys show that Obama's election has also taught Americans other trivia about their country, including the fact that elections come every four years; that there are 50 stars on the flag, and that each star stands for a state; and that George W. Bush was their previous president, but is now leaving.

"Wait, I thought Bush left a while ago," Bertha Walton told us, furrowing her brow. "Didn't we just go without a President for a few years there?"