Ideas matter. They have consequences. They lead to great civilizations doing great things or to human depravity on monumental scales. They also change us on a personal level as we discover what they are and apply them to how we live, how we think, what we do, what and how we believe. The following ideas are some of those that can change your life. Forever.

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change!” ~ Betsy Henry

Our perceptions of things creates the reality of the things we experience – even if that perception is wrong. Reality becomes almost unimportant against the power we have to shape our experience of life as we perceive it. To the degree I perceive an experience as positive, I will experience it as positive. That same exact experience will be experienced negatively if I interpret it that way.

The implications are truly amazing. We can construct the life we want by doing work inside our own heads, reconstructing the perceptive framework by which we view the world. We can quite literally construct the world of our choosing by starting in the area of our imaginations.

“Today my life is about savoring every moment; it’s about appreciating exactly what I have.” ~ Alex Blackwell

The only moment anyone ever has is the present one. The next moment is a heartbeat from never arriving. The last moment has already lost its shape and form but in our memories.

Right here, right now, is the only time we can possibly experience. Even the sensations we have as we remember events and people from even decades ago are still experienced right now.

So why not be fully, wholly, totally here, present, all focus and attention and energy on the exact moment being lived. Have you ever played with your kids while thinking about a big project due in two days? Could they tell you weren’t fully there with them? Did it affect the way they felt?

Stop living in two worlds, the now-world and the then-world. You will end up resenting one and those in the one you resent just may end up resenting you!

“Kicking perfectionism essentially comes down to setting priorities. Not every project needs to be done to perfection. Not every assignment deserves 150% of your attention.” ~ Melody Fletcher

There are sometimes an overwhelming degree of expectations and demands placed on our time. Some of those things require us to be outstanding.

Mediocre parents, for instance, don’t just raise mediocre children.

Their mediocrity sometimes produces children who never learned the Golden Rule, who never picked up on the whole compassion thing, never learned that sharing was good, that honesty was the best policy, that anger was to be controlled, that lust grows when fed.

But not all activities are as inherently important as parenting. Some activities simply don’t require as much time and effort.

Aiming at perfection in the relatively trivial areas of our lives means squeezing out more critical priorities.

It’s been said that the good is the enemy of the best. Sometimes more gets done when we choose not to do everything perfectly that needs doing. A tidy-enough home is indeed tidy enough. Now go play with your kids!

So much of life is finite. There are only so many hours in the day and only so many days in a life. The more stuff in life we say “yes” to, the fewer hours we have left to fill life with things that truly matter.

Besides, if our lives are filled with meaningless time-fillers, we will not likely come to value our time as the precious gift it is.

It’s not so much the quantity of activities that adds meaning to life as the quality of those activities. Fill life with meaninglessness and life will be relatively meaningless no matter the number of such activities you cram into each moment.

Life is filled with “Noes.” Don’t do this, Can’t do that. No U-Turn. Stay off the Grass. Slow Down. Quiet Down. Don’t get involved. Stay out of it. None of your business. Too dangerous. Be careful. Get off. Get down. That’s not for climbing. Stop it.

Everywhere we turn, someone else is telling us to be careful and beware and behave according to custom and expectation. “We don’t do things that way, here.” “Conform and comply.” “Sit down and shut up.”

It can be difficult to scream “YES!” in the face of all the “Noes.” But life rewards the Yeses much more frequently than its negative counterpart.

Certainly there are offers we should reject. I wish Whitney Houston had that sort of resolve to say “NO!” the first time she used.

But so many other opportunities to experience the positive things of life are so often rejected. Learn to say “Yes” to life, to opportunity and possibility. Open your eyes and your life to the constant call to learn and challenge yourself to do new things, to step far away from your comfort zone, to imagine the impossible and then figure out a way to make it possible.

Say “Yes” more often to life and your life will change. Perhaps dramatically.

“I don’t remember exactly when it happened, but at some point I had an ‘aha’ moment and realized that ‘okay’ was not going to cut it anymore.” ~ Sibyl Chavez

Mediocrity is the pull of the average. Okay is the siren song of the almost. It is the journey half-traveled, the yawn in the middle of the sentence. It is the couch instead of the door. It is the treadmill set at low while the mountain is left unclimbed. It is lukewarm and mush and stale bread in the smorgasbord of life.

And it leads to the middle of the pack.

Most people have average jobs in average homes raising an average family doing average things.

But why not have spectacular and amazing and extraordinary?

Such conditions require much more than sleepwalking through life. But oh the rewards for those who open their eyes and shift their lives into a steady jog uphill.

Life can be truly amazing … if, however, and only if, we choose to live amazingly.

I remember when I first took up snow skiing (back when there were no such things as snow boards). For the longest time I was able to ski without falling down. But the thing is that I didn’t progress as a skier much either. In the meantime, my older brother would tell me all about his wipe-outs.

But you know what? All his wipe-outs were done while trying to do things on his skis I never dreamed of doing. I never fell because I never tried anything but the easy slopes doing simple turns, hardly challenging myself at all.

And so I slowly became a mediocre skier and my brother quickly became an awesome skier, working winters on the ski patrol at a local mountain.

Enough said.

What do you think?

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Thank you, Vidya! Keep an eye out for Part II. I originally intended on everyone being included in the same post, but it was just too long — even for me! But my next post will have a little something there from you too! 🙂

I look forward to your weekend inspiration post! Sounds wonderful. I’m glad you liked my commentary under each quote I used here. But I have to quickly add that it’s not quite a description so much as just my inability to keep silent for very long, having to throw in my thoughts about the topic of the quote in the mix. But I would never presume to try to tell anyone what was meant or provide an explanation or description of what someone else said.

Hi Ken,
A great collection of quotes from some fabulous bloggers!
I love the concept that we can distill our lives down to “Ideas that matter.” If we focus solely on these concepts and let the distracting “chatter” go, we’re bound to live happier and more successful lives.
Thank you so much for sharing my post here too.Angela Artemis/Poweredbyintuition recently posted … When Intuition Leads You to A New Career

Yes! Some fabulous bloggers, for sure! And oh the amount of distracting chatter that’s out there, floating around in the media, international rhetoric and interpersonal atmosphere! But to first recognize and differentiate between what’s merely distracting, disguised as importance, and what truly is inherently important is of the first order. After that, we can learn to focus on what matters most for the happier and more successful lives like you so rightly suggest.

This is a great post! There are so many bits of great wisdom and insight! What resonated with me the most was the idea of being open to what life has to offer and making the shift the live a more than ordinary life. I try to always be receptive to new and greater things that come my way.Joe recently posted … How to Create a More Optimistic Outlook

Hey Joe, thanks! There is so much wisdom and insight out there in cyberland. And you’re the source of quite a bit of it!

I think that openness to life’s offerings and challenges is so important. That’s what coaxes us out of our shells to explore the world, our inner potentials and all of life’s opportunities. So often, as you suggest, life’s greatest rewards are after the difficult climb.

Great post with the combination of quotations and text. I especially related to your skiing story. Even though I lived in Aspen for awhile, I never became a good skier because I was afraid of falling and I didn’t want to go too fast because I couldn’t stop. As I’ve gotten older, I’m more of a risk taker in some ways then when I was young. I’m not so afraid to make a mistake. I’m not so afraid of looking foolish. (If you don’t believe the last statement, just check out the 60 year old granny in taekwondo class!) Life is not only more enriched, but it’s also lots more fun.

What also struck me in this post is how all of us have something to offer. The quotations you included are inspiring quotes from awesome bloggers. And I’m willing to bet that you had other quotes you just didn’t have room for. It’s like what I say in my Happy Place discussion group — we all bring something of value to the table, and we can all learn something of value from each other.

Great post to start my day–thanks!Galen Pearl recently posted … Be Glad In It

Aspen? Wow! That must have been absolutely beautiful, Galen! Yeah, it was the fear of looking foolish for me that kept me going too slow on slopes that were too easy. How foolish is that! But how awesome it is that you’re in taekwondo! I did that in my 20s. Also trained in a Filipino martial art called escrima (also called kali) and muay thai kick boxing. But that was a loooong time ago!

I had a whole lot of other quotes I wanted to include, in fact. But you’re right, I didn’t have room for them. Truth is, I could make this an ongoing series and never run out of wise and insightful comments by wise and insightful bloggers (like you!) to draw from.

Thank you for bringing your own wonderful brand of insight to every discussion I’ve seen you enter. You’re a light flickering brightly in a world that can seem kinda dim.

Love your topic on this post. The line – “But why not have spectacular and amazing and extraordinary?” rings to true. Why can’t we? Usually the reason is that we hold ourselves back. I completely agree that with some things like parenting, we need to reach for excellence, and others like having a perfectly clean home can take a back seat to exploring life. Great quotes as well. That is a wonderful group of bloggers.Cathy | Treatment Talk recently posted … Little Joys Were Sprinkled Upon Me: Meet Mark Matthews

So true, Cathy! Aren’t we all expert at the infamous art of holding ourselves back? We are so good at coming up with so many reasons why we should stay home, inside, safe, protected. We are good at rationalizing ourselves into inaction.

As for the wonderful group of bloggers, you may have noticed the title indicates Part I of a series (at least one more). You might want to peak in when Part II is posted. I’m just saying. 😉

Thanks for including me in your lineup, Ken! All of these ideas challenge our traditional thinking and get us to expand our horizons – to think bigger, to question our self-imposed limitations, to become more of who we really are.

Thanks so much! I’m thrilled you liked the post. As for being in the lineup, glad to put you in it! 🙂

I really like the way you put this, Melody: “to become more of who we really are.” We truly are something much more than we usually allow ourselves to be. The human potential is crazy amazing. And so much of it is left untapped. But as we remove self-imposed limitations, as you said, we can step ever closer to the potential.

Thank you, Marianne! So glad you got something out of the post. The power of perception is truly amazing. The way a placebo can actually replicate the effects of a real drug in the system is such a testimony to the power and influence the mind has over “reality.”

Actually, I would LIKE to stand in front of a large crowd to deliver something like the words of this post. I enjoy public speaking. Maybe one day …

I like that you added “transform our hearts” to change our thoughts to transform our lives and world. Ultimately, for most of us, it’s the passion of the heart that keeps us working hard, trying new things, taking steps toward our goals. So you’re right to point that out.

I was happy to include your words in the post, Fran! Keeping saying eloquent words and I’ll keep coming back looking for quotes!

Amen to that, brother! It is true that not only are things so often arranged so that we hear what’s needed at that moment when we need to hear it and are open to it, but that Divinity works through us to bless others’ lives. Such an important couple points to make!

Ken,
Thanks for including me with these wonderful bloggers! I’m honored!! You picked the perfect quote for me because that is my mantra! I first heard it from Wayne Dyer and I put it in many of my posts because it’s so true!!Betsy at Zen Mama recently posted … Teach Your Children To Give Random Acts Of Kindness

You’re right, it IS true. Our perception of things IS our reality, at least the reality we experience. We can’t experience anything, for that matter, without passing it through our interpretive framework for viewing it. Everything we see, hear, taste, smell and feel is shaded and colored by our past experiences, current attitudes, assumptions about people, ourselves and life, our personalities, beliefs and mind-sets. Change the assumptions, attitudes, mind-sets and beliefs and the experience is effectively changed. The implications of this fact are almost limitless.

Thanks for sharing that with us, Betsy! And keep chanting that mantra wherever you go; More people need to have its message sink deep into their hearts, minds and souls!

Hey there Peter, There’s a lot of great things being said by wise bloggers out there, for sure. I know what you mean about those aha moments. I have something close to a visceral reaction to new insight I stumble into. And so like you, it keeps me looking and learning.

The fact that I was writing the comment when it was 1 at night might have influenced my thinking. Or you did manage to shut up my talkative fingers! You might get a thank you card from my mom if she comes to know about this!

We just forget how to evolve; well most of us have. We have a to do list and we keep ticking things on it and keep moving on. There is no arguing that things need to be done but we need to be reminding ourselves that there is a huge difference between moving on and moving ahead. When we learn to do that, we don’t just learn, we grow!

Yet another great line: “there is a huge difference between moving on and moving ahead.” So true! It’s the difference between “going through the motions” and actually going somewhere. Well said, Hajra! I’m always picking up great gems of thought from you. Keep ’em coming. Goodness knows I need them! 🙂

The first one has been very powerful for me. When I stopped blaming others and being resentful and took personal responsibility for my life, my perceptions of others changed radically. It took me to a much happier place.

The whole dilemma of saying yes or no to everything is something I’ve been pondering. Possibly a future post. 🙂

Self-responsibility is such a scary prospect for people who have not made a habit of it, but as I’ve said elsewhere, there’s nothing more liberating. So glad you found that happier place!

I look forward to what you do with the yes/no issue. But so important to say yes to the opportunities for growth and happiness and to say no to the distractions and less important activities that can quickly fill up a day and push out the most important priorities.

Learning to distinguish between the two is a valuable lesson to learn!

I love this saying, “Change the way yo look at things, and the things you look at change.” This is so true. If we change our mentality towards something, we begin to see the opportunities that at one point we couldn’t see. Our ideas can make a huge difference in people’s lives and in our lives. All of what we have now were at one point people’s ideas. Thanks for sharing this post KenDia recently posted … How to conquer your fears

The very act of believing something is possible opens our eyes to the answers that were hidden the moment before believing them possible. Resources come to light, paths are opened and the once-hidden steps revealed. All this because when we look at things through the lens of doubt and disbelief, such things are hidden, trapped behind the doors of our own self-doubt.

But once doubt is defeated, once we can begin to believe we can accomplish and overcome, develop and break through, we start to see things differently, through the lens of belief and optimism and self-confidence. And that’s when great things are done by very common people who have come to believe in very uncommon things.

Good on you Ken, some great quotes.
“Excuses get you nowhere” is the way that I like to view things. Clear the decks of ‘excuse’ and you are free to move in whatever direction you want. Thankyou.
be good to yourself
DavidDavid Stevens recently posted … Living Life Today – When you must draw a Line in the Sand

Excuses only lock us into old patterns of doing things that prevent growth and self-responsibility and self-direction of our God-given lives. So many people forfeit their freedom of choice by denying they have it, claiming to be victims of circumstance and other people’s malevolent intentions. But in the end, the mirror looms large and demands we notice the reflection of a created life is our own.

Thanks so much for sharing that bit of valuable insight, David. I think I’ll adopt the motto. I like it. 🙂

Hi Ken,
This is great – I love how you quoted the bloggers! Such wisdom here! I love them all (and all the bloggers) but Tess’s quote jumps out at me! Have a big Yes!
Okay! :p
LoriLori Gosselin recently posted … What Is Real?

Thanks Lori, great quotes from great bloggers who also happen to be great people. Not a bad combo! Tess has lots of great quotable stuff. But the idea that we have a “yes” that’s so large and so loud and so central to our lives that it compels us to prioritize and focus and say “no” to the things that don’t matter nearly as much as the compelling “yes!” is a powerful idea, for sure! What’s you’re biggest “yes” in your life? I have a few: my family, my teaching (day job), my faith and my blog. Given those priorities, there’s a lot I have to say no to.

In life we must always have the courage to say no. There are many situations in life that we have to take a stand for what we believe. Sometimes, when we are all alone that is when it is hard to say no. I figure it is up to us to know what is best for us, at least at that very moment.
Even with that being said, sometimes we know what is right, but we take the easy way out. I believe that is when we must say no. I also think that there are more times that we should say no then saying yes to something.
In this world, it is every man for themselves and people that have our best interest at heart come “far and in between.” <– I hope I said that right!

I believe saying no, but not saying can't because we can do anything we put our mind too. We should be back handed in our bottom lip by a magic hand that pops up everytime we use the word can't! ( :

This is so true: “Sometimes, when we are all alone that is when it is hard to say no.” Sometimes social pressure can make “no” easier when others who know our values see us in action. But when no one is around, no eyes on us, that, in many ways become the true measure of our character.

Still I think there are more people who have our best interest at heart than you think. Certainly we shouldn’t be naive about life, but we also have to be careful of becoming too cynical as well.

I really like the way you put this: “I believe saying no, but not saying can’t.” Nice distinction between saying “no” right now, but staying open to a future possible “Yes.”

You think so? Here’s the quote in question: “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change!”

To my way of thinking, there are two ways things change when we change how we look at them. One is that the things adapt to the way we see them. They actually change. Perhaps by seeing the good in someone, they begin to act up to that vision of them. Or, on a more metaphysical level, perhaps the universe or God delivers the blessings to meet the level of belief and faith we extend.

The other is that we adapt to the reality of the things we see. When we change how we look at life, what we see in it changes. Not that the things themselves change, but that we do, our perception does, our attitudes do. When I begin to believe that the universe is benevolent, I suddenly start noticing tons of evidence of that new belief, even though there was always proof of both to begin with.

In the end, experientially at least, I don’t think there’s a tremendous difference between the two. But to the degree there is (and in some ways there certainly is), I still hold the quote in question can legitimately reflect both interpretations simultaneously. I just chose one particular aspect of it to dwell on in my comments.

Hi Ken, yes I do. Has the quote changed because I saw it differently to you? This is the first sense you give I think, and I think it is wrong. I think the second sense you give is the correct one. Does this have implications for your experience? Yes, and big ones I think.

However, I also think that it is possible for us to ‘get mugged by reality’. And this possibility isn’t offered by the first sense you give. I (and other member’s of my family) are currently dealing with the consequences of my father not wanting to accept aging. However much he wants to see himself as 20 years younger than he is (he is 87 chronologically) his body isn’t co-operating. He would be happier if he could adjust to his age. Has it made a difference for him to keep active and keep learning? For sure. But he simply can’t do what he once could and making himself depressed and miserable about this doesn’t improve his life – or the lives of those around him.Evan recently posted … I Won’t be Around Much for a Couple of Days

The quote’s the same, Evan. It was taken from the title of one of Betsy’s posts. At the time I didn’t know, but she indicated it was a statement she got from Dr. Wayne Dyer, certainly one who believes in the universe blessing people who believe (had a book, if I remember, titled something close to that).

That must be tough to see your dad going through all that, though.

But your dad is doing the exact opposite of what I suggest in the comments under the quote. I suggested that “To the degree I perceive an experience as positive, I will experience it as positive.” What your dad has done is to ignore the experience altogether, even denying it. What I’m suggesting is that he accept the reality of it, but look for the positive parts of the process of aging so that the experience itself becomes a blessing to himself and even to others as well. I’m not suggesting that the reality of aging would be reversed by any means. I’m saying that in every trial there is good and bad. Our experience of the trial can be altered by changing how we see it (ie: as a curse or as a blessing, or at least as a natural process of life, preparing us for the next stage in what I believe to be an eternal condition). The horror of a thing is mitigated or exacerbated dependent on how we view it. Change the view and change the degree to which it is one or the other experience.

In that case, even muggings from reality can be sources of spiritual education and preparation. If I see the mugging as a vindictive God getting even with me or life dumping its most hideous insult upon me, if it’s meaningless and arbitrary, then the experience will also be much more likely to produce depression, bewilderment, and disillusion. But if I can perceive some purpose in it, if I can recognize a higher reason, then the sharpness of the edge of the pain will, at least, be dulled.

You see, it’s how your dad perceives the fact that he can’t do what he used to. Denying that he can’t do it is delusion. But seeing in it something other than limitation, something more than disability, something that will allow him to reevaluate what kinds of things he CAN do and how else he can make meaning out of living, THAT is how a change can recreate reality.

Bottom line is that the second sense is what I thought I was suggesting. But I do believe the first sense is not necessarily wrong either. I do believe in the miraculous. I’ve had experiences that testify to them. But that doesn’t mean that every experience is changed by a God-Butler delivering on demand. God or the universe or life or however some may interpret it, doesn’t end the aging process and wipe away all suffering and pain simply because we refuse to accept its reality. To suggest the first interpretation is wrong is to suggest that our attitudes have no affect on circumstances or people or events directly. And I just don’t think that’s wrong at all. I think, perhaps, many people proscribe too much to God or miracles of one sort or another. I believe that sometimes life just happens. But that doesn’t mean all coincidences are no more than that.

Anyway, that’s what I think about it. 🙂 Would love to hear back, though.

Yes, that was my point Ken, the external world (in this case the quote) didn’t change because I saw it differently to you. This is what I mean by this understanding being wrong.

Much depends on ‘directly’. With inanimate stuff I don’t think we do effect it directly from our attitudes – it happens from our actions. With people and relationships I think it is different because the people involved actively perceive us in ways that non-living things don’t. Us expressing something can lead to change in another without any attempt or intention on our part of changing them.

As to the miraculous, we agree. (Unfortunately) miracles aren’t delivered just because we want or intend them.

So glad we had this conversation. I love hammering out important ideas like this with someone who has a different (even if not as different as originally thought) perspective. And it looks to me like we’re probably pretty close to sharing the same views.

But regardless, great talking with you, Evan. As said before (probably every time you’ve been here!), I just love your matter-of-fact expression of your point of view. Very refreshing and honest.

I sincerely wish the best for your dad. Reality sometimes bites. But when someone refuses to accept it to the point of depression, it bites even harder and bites for everyone involved. Good luck with all that.

This might be slightly cliche, but I always resort to Nike’s slogan of “Just Do It”
It works wonder for me, for I’m a person who over thinks, over analyze, and over worry
So when I think to myself “Just Do It”, everything else dispels, and i can concentrate on my ideas and you know, do it 🙂

Another little phrase I have for myself is “what have you got to lose even if you fail?”
usually the answer is “nothing”
so it gives me just that little boost to keep on “just do it”-ing

Awesome advice, Noch! I know of a man who long before Nike’s slogan appeared anywhere, had a plaque on his desk that simply read, “Do it!” Such a powerful statement when internalized. And looks like you have.

I like your other phrase as well: “What have you got to lose if you fail?” With those twin powerhouse mottoes in hand, Noch, there will be some pretty amazing things out there for you!

Sich a nice post! O really like you point on the “YES”-thing, it reminds me just on the movie called Yes-man with Jim Carry. Sometimes, in a negative environment, it can be really hard to keep smiling and say yes, but it is always worth!Julie recently posted … dental crown

I love them all! But the one by Sibyl Chavez really spoke to me. I decided about a year ago that I refused to live an average life…But lately, that’s exactly what I’ve been doing. I’m refusing to make the positive changes I know I need to; I feel like I’m sleepwalking. Guess it’s time to lace up my jogging shoes and get going. 😉 Thanks for the reminder.

I think one of the reasons we so often make the decision to do something extraordinary then find ourselves stuck in the mud of ordinary is because we sometimes expect results sooner than is realistic. But excellence is a time-consuming sport. It takes a while to develop and mature into.

So when we don’t see it as quickly as we’d like to, we get discouraged and throw in the towel, or never really even make the conscious decision to quit, so much as simply slide into old patterns, no longer as inspired or passionate about the changed life we once committed to.

So be patient with the process and keep jogging forward, one step, one mile at a time. 🙂

I’m not sure how you knew exactly what I needed to read, but that was it. Just today I was thinking about how I’ve been considering shutting down my blog because it’s taking too long, I don’t have many readers, etc. Truth is, I’ve only been writing (and very sporadically) since August – I haven’t even given myself time to excel.

You’re welcome, Kaylee! And never feel like you’re bombarding me with comments! I LOVE hearing from my readers.

I’m so glad you’re going to keep at it. Blogging is not a get-rich-quick scheme, for sure. It takes work and patience and personal growth as a writer and blogger (not the same things, by the way). There are great writers who never go anywhere because they learn the art of writing but not the art of getting their writing in front of eyes that care. So be sure to read blogs that blog about blogging too. That will give you ideas and arm you with the knowledge you need to get people to start showing up and stick around for a while.

Good luck, Kaylee. Thank you so much for sharing your response to my earlier reply to your original comment. That means a lot to me.

Great post! You have some amazing ideas here. I really loved the one about having a big, meaningful yes. Enthusiasm and a sense of fulfillment are so very important to me. Because I love what I do and it gives me that sense of fulfillment, it’s easier than ever to say no to the many other time-snatchers that could fill my day.Nea | Self Improvement Saga recently posted … Inspirational Thoughts: What are You Waiting For?

Thanks Nea! That one seems to have made a big impression; Lots of comments about that one. I know what you mean about how easy it is to say no to trivial matters when there’s something you;re passionate about. My family and M2bH take up most of my time. With my church responsibilities and teaching, there’s not much time for much else.

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My name is Ken Wert, the founder of M2bH. My purpose here is to teach you how to live a richer life of greater purpose and meaning, of mind-blowing possibility and deeper, more soul-satisfying happiness than you ever dreamt was possible. Join us on this happy adventure as you learn how to unlock your hidden potential to enjoy the rewards of a life well lived. Read more ...