What To Do When You Can’t Find The Answer

Most of us have experienced something happening that makes us feel stuck as if there’s no way out. Our world seems to spiral tighter and tighter. As a result, we feel small, restricted, with limited options available – and we can’t see a way out. We feel pressured to find an answer, but we’re only able to generate ideas that are limited and weak.

Our tendency is to try to have more control, and usually, we think it is to do more, within the small, tight hole we have dug ourselves into.

When this happens, the best thing to do in that state is to release The Whole Thing and start from zero.

Hear me out, there is power in zero.

1. Return to Infinite Possibilities

The first step is to stop all attempts to control the situation. As challenging as it may be, making the decision to surrender it all, even for a brief moment, can give you much more leeway and bring in more resources than you can imagine.

Once you surrender, it is important to ground yourself in this new space by acknowledging that you are now in a state of not-knowing. Acknowledge that you don’t know anything about what’s going to take place from here on and you are trusting in an invisible power to take care of it.

This is a powerful step that people usually miss and end up feeling too insecure to remain in this space long enough to reap the benefits.

This space, which I call “the space of infinite possibilities”, is where all things are equal. Every scenario and option, imaginable or unimaginable, is possible to create and manifest.

Allow yourself some time to sink into this space. If you feel a contraction in your body, notice that it is your mind resisting giving up control. It is just a bodily reaction against the thought that it is unsafe. It is just a thought. Let the thought come and go. Let the waves of contraction move through you until it dissipates. Stay in this space, and expand in this space.

If you yield to the thought that it is unsafe and you go back to trying to control the external circumstances, you are choosing to return to the limited space with limited options. That perfect solution, the ideal outcome, may not be visible to you in that space. This is why staying in the space of infinite possibilities is so powerful.

2. Connect to a Deeper Truth

From the space of infinite possibilities, ask yourself, “Can I do/achieve this?” This, referring to the outcome you want. Inquire gently within.

Again, you may feel a contraction in your body as a response. It stems from your mind labeling the circumstance as unchangeable, that it’s dire and you’re likely to suffer out of it. In other words, your mind does not believe that you can solve this problem.

Now, there’s a part of you that is separate from the mind. You cannot access this part of you when your mind is very busy. This is the part that is beyond mind and its judgments, labeling and defensiveness. It is this part of you that you’re inquiring of.

As you ask yourself the question while staying calm, you may feel a sort of ‘parting of curtains’ as you move through pockets of resistance before getting to a deeper place of truth: where you are connected to the Real You. This is the expanded version of you; he or she is way more capable, resourceful and has a higher perspective of what you’re dealing with.

Allow yourself to connect to your believability in the possibility of achieving the outcome you want. Let the sense of believability flow to your mind, infusing your mind with a new sense of possibility.

3. Opening Up to Unlimited Resources

Cast your net out in the open, into the vast unknown where out-of-the-box ideas are found. Be open to any ideas, no matter how unpractical you may judge them to be. One of these ideas may be just the stepping stone to a perfect solution.

Sometimes, a solution may not be apparent immediately. It may take some time for your mind to connect the dots.

The more dots you reveal, even if they are useless on their own, the faster the connecting can happen. And soon, you are on your way out.

Amyra Mah is the author of Embrace the Unlovable: How to Eliminate Shame, Guilt, Self-Judgements and Come Home to Yourself Using the Groundbreaking The Compassionate Self-Love Method . She is a deep soul-worker and addiction therapist specializing in healing deep emotional issues behind life challenges.