Say, what do you think Peter Parker's favorite brand of peanut butter is?

Panels from Spider-Man: The Task and the Terror, (1994), one of four comics produced for and given away on lids of Peter Pan Peanut Butter. Script by Mark Bernardo, pencils by Craig Brasford, inks by Sam DeLaRosa, colors by Mark Bernardo, letters by Ken Lopez

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

So, now that I've done that, how about a pop quiz: what cute 'n' fuzzy phenomenon debuted on the World Wide Web six years ago and has delighted billions through witty and clever banter and comedy ever since that day in 2005?

No, it's notYouTube. Sheesh. I have never been issued a cease and desist injunction by the owners of major movie, TV, and music studios! (Yet.)

In other words, it's time to wish myself a Happy Sixth Blogiversary! (You can too, if you wanna!) On this day in 2005, all those years ago, this little puppet-town cow-blog opened for business, and I've been delighted to invite you by for a cup of hot cocoa (with minimarshmallows) and a good giggle at a comic book or some other pop culture phenomenon. As we close our fiscal year and finish up the tax paperwork to send to the IRS (Internet Re-Blogging Service), shall we take our usual year-end survey of my favorite posts of May 26, 2010- May 25, 2011? Yes, let's!

As always, thanks to each and every one of you for reading, commenting, linking and laffing at my posts. A extra-special salute of the hoof to my good pals The Bureau Chiefs who let me advise on and help out with the comedy publishing sensation of 2011, Write More Good, now available at all fine bookstores near you! (And a few nasty ones.) Buy one! Buy several! Buy one for the dog!

With even more thanks to Hank McCoy, the Warriors Three, and the Guy Freaking Out on the Cover of Action Comics #1, I'd like to wrap up this self-congratualatory post with a Special Blogiversary Six Ten of a Kind, celebrating Comics Oughta Be Fun's anniversary with a big celebration of the number six!

So, it's all over except for the eating of the ceremonial cupcakes. Enjoy yours, and be sure to come back next year when I'll maybe get a chance to feature this cover:

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

It's just another day in the life of Captain America and The New Warriors (remember the 1990s' longest-running title, New Warriors Team-Up?). In a deserted warehouse in Gotham New York, the heroes are battling a quartet of super-powered young criminals...powered by drugggggggs!

Two-page spread from Captain America Goes to War Against Drugs v.2 #3 (1994), script by George Caragonne, pencils by Colleen Doran, Inks by Greg Adams, colors by George Roussos, letters by Rick Parker

(Click picture to addiction-size)

Until it's revealed...wait for it...until it's revealed that the drug lord leader of the super-addicts is an alien. Thanks. Marvel Comics in Association with Drug Free America, for this grim, serious, ultra-realistic portrayal of drug distribution and addiction! What's next...we're going to see that Galactus has bulimia? Oh wait, we really don't want to see that.

Yep, an alien! Operating from an orbiting satellite 22,300 miles above the Earth, the alien druglord disciplines his crew! He's beginning to regret having hired junkies as his aids! See, that's why you should always have your resumé updated and ready to go...with a good CV and a solid work ethic, you could easily rise to the top of a galactic drug pusher ring! Well, it beats being an Alpha Primitive, at least.

Not to mention that his company's bonus structure is based on the strategies from Blake of Glengarry Glen Ross, sending the young supervillains (clockwise from upper right: Kid Robocop, Poison Ivy II: Lily, Young Juggernaut, and Shiva, Jr.) scrambling for their fix. Also, they are probably stealing office supplies, as the stock of Post-It™ notes is dangerous low.

Back at the Warrior-Cave, Cap and the New Warriors survey the stash of drugs while the Warriors explain their personalities through expository dialogue. Hey look, it's everybody's favorite Tidal Teen, Namorita, suggesting a cleverly economic way to cut out the middleman and speed up your business structure! Namorita knows a lot about business, because like last week it appears she's cut a deal to appear in every PSA comic book ever.

Meanwhile, New Warriors member Silhouette discovers that her friend Doreen (or, perhaps, Dorreen) is a junkie! (Silhouette always has all the answers...well, what's her answer to that--?) Well, it's a good thing Doreen is sitting on the cleanest public bathroom floor ever. A big thumbs up to Marvel for introducing a differently-abled hero in Silhouette (she even has a taser in her crutches). A big thumbs down for coloring this half-Cambodian hero as if she's made out of stone. (Well, maybe that's to remind us not to take her for granite.*) Double thumbs down for her Norwegian-grandmother-knitted flocked vest. Let's not even mention her actual civilian name: Silhouette Chord. It's canon, fanboys!

By the end, everybody gets to hit something (Captain America, several times!), and the alien drug lords are driven off the Earth, which raises the question of who's going to keep him from distributing deadly drugs to the teens of Skrullos, Chandilar, and Galador? Eh, no need to worry about that. As the comic asks, is this the end? It's up to you! No, actually, it isn't. That's the end.

Special bonus feature!: Search and find and circle and cross out when you get them wrong these words related to law enforcement! Such as "bribery!" And "fraud!" And..."steno!" Also, find "FCI!" Short for Federal Captain-America Investigations.

Join us next time when Namorita teaches you all about the troubles of smoking! Namely, it's really hard to keep your cigarettes lit underwater.

The Mid-Day Matinee this week, all week: Ads from the Distinguished Competition! That's right, for once in this blog...no FF, no Daredevil, no Doctor Bong, no Squirrel Girl! (Aww.) If this quintet of Dynamically Competitive advertisements don't make you want to buy books from the guys across the street, we don't know what will!

Ad for Angel and the Ape (1968) in Justice League of America #63 (June 1968)