Sexual possessiveness – the passion that one desires to possess another to fulfill sensual drive.

Selfishness – the desire to control for our own purposes.

To come to terms with these negative emotions is to be in tune with oneself and recognize what the feeling is really about.

1.Recognize that all trials or hurtful experiences have the power of develop a deeper and more abiding love within us.

2.While you are still experiencing the painful emotions resulting from this experience begin to look for the positive outcome of these experiences.

Greater sensitivity inwardly

Greater ability to feel or empathize with pain of others

Slows down our ‘pace’ and enables us to become more aware of the importance of those we love.

3. Practice gratefulness for all of these benefits and others that we receive from trials and hurtful experiences.As you look at these positive consequences with gratefulness you will discover that the anger worry loneliness hurt feelings fear etc will literally ‘drain’ out of your heart and mind.

There are three sources we tend to look to find happiness and avoid the pain of negative emotions.

1. People – we want someone to meet our deepest needs.People often don’t meet our needs because they’re preoccupied with meeting their own needs.We can try to use people to give us quality life – hoping that will bring us lasting fulfillment.Most often though, people can actually dim our inner light.Our level of expectations is unrealistic.

2.Places – we tend to change places to get away from the hustle and bustle looking for a place we will be happy.Usually places bring happiness only for a season – till the new in gone.Again expectationsthat are tied to location is unrealistic.

3. Things – money, possessions, increased talents, all of these things are often looked on as a main source of life.Many people feel that they are not successful until they have acquired certain amount of possessions.Advertisements and marketers underscore this desire and manipulate the desires to achieve by actually bringing greater pressure to life.

Again it is not having ‘things’ that causes anger or hurt feelings it’s the expectation that they bring happiness that is wrong.

And when we don’t find fulfillment in people places and things we often experience negative emotions that further short circuit our life.

I know today has been a hard day for you. Yes the hours have been painful and your heart is so hurt and wounded right now. Take a deep breath and settle back in your chair and listen to me, There are 10 things I would like to tell you as an older sister and friend.

Don't make a decision about it for 3 days.

Perspectives can change in the morning light - sleep on it.

Life's painful moments can teach us a depth and a understanding we can't get any other way.

When you can't see God's hand in your life, you can trust His heart and plan for you.

Watch for God's direction to come in a quiet simple answer for you. It will not be based upon pride.

Look up - the season you are in will change - look past the clouds and know the sun is still shining.

Stay true to integrity and character - so you will not be ashamed of your behavior in the matter.

Open your Bible and receive God's comfort in your night.

Stand ... do not quit - life can change in an instant bringing a unexpected surprise.

No one can rule another persons actions - only your own. Can you accept this?

Two things are true in life for you......

The sun will come up tomorrow

And you never know what the tide of life will bring to you.

Be strong........ be real.......trust God..... hold these answers and watch God work on your behalf.