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This week may well go down in history for many reasons, not the least of which is that social media gave trash talk a whole new face and name. And I’m not talking about Phil Robertson. I’m talking about people who spout off about something someone else said, taken out of context, blown up, shared and memed for all the world to see, read and hear. I’m talking about those who speak before they think. I’m talking about those who would rather be right than be gracious. I’m talking about “us vs. them” .

And although I have a lot to say, this isn’t the time or the place. You see, it’s my daughter’s 18th birthday. My firstborn daughter who came into the world screaming on a cold December morning. The one who couldn’t wait for her scheduled appointment to make her debut but instead woke me 5 hours early to get the show on the road. And because it’s also 2 days before my dad’s birthday and 5 days before Christmas, I think there’s something else that needs to be said.

This weekend and in the coming days, you will gather at tables and in living rooms. You will hug and be hugged. You will share stories of the past year and exchange gifts with those you love. You will break bread together and be enveloped in fellowship and love. This is no time for debates and beating of chests.

The surest way to ruin a gathering is to bring politics, “religion” and your pride to the table. If that happens in any of my gatherings , I’m picking up my sorry ass and sitting it down at a piano to play Christmas carols loudly for all to hear. I’m taking up a game of Settlers with my girls. I’m pulling out the ROOK cards. I’m working on that puzzle. I’m going to eat shortbread and stuffing and maybe even at the same time. I’m going to laugh and share photos. I’m going to take photos and laugh at you. I’m going to defuse, distract and disseminate. Because it’s Christmas. And Jesus didn’t come so you or I or she or him could be right and say how right we are. He came for peace.

And so, let’s all pause and say this together…..

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Where there is injury, pardon;

Where there is error, truth;

Where there is doubt, faith;

Where there is despair, hope;

Where there is darkness, light;

And where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, Grant that I may not so much seek

To be consoled as to console;

To be understood as to understand;

To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

~St. Francis of Assisi

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Like, 3 a.m. bedtime tired. Don’t ask- long story. However, I managed to snap some pics of my living room when it was dark and cozy last night. Never mind the pile of cards on the coffee table, or the crap on the floor. Never mind I usually have so much more done by December 16. Whatever. Life is what it is and sometimes we gotta roll with it. I usually have my Christmas village set up. But it’s been a couple years and it’s still in boxes. Maybe next year?

For this year, I’m decorating as I go. We’ve been painting and ripping up carpet in this old house. But with snow falling I needed to have that cozy feeling inside. And cozy to me is red on white, deer, antlers, twinkly lights and candlelight. Cozy is blankets on every chair and couch, a decorated tree, carols on repeat and something that is plaid.

We only have the living room, front hall and dining room done but it’s something. And I’m okay with scaled back, simpler and no-pressure-to-do-more this year.

Tree has been decorated over a couple weeks with deer, antlers and book page cones/pinwheels I’ve made. Haven’t pulled out the *actual* tree decor yet!

Twinkly lights on antlers we’ve had in the garage for years. My favourite part by far. And that newly painted fireplace? LOVE it.

Redeemed Christmas blocks from Dayspring, stocking hangers from Target, dollar store deer, candle pedestals from thrift store and stockings are 3 years old from Superstore.

I made this book page wreath for a sale. It didn’t sell- it’s now mine. And I love the silvery deer head! I didn’t plan any of this and yet it all happens to work. The red flannel over the canvas painting is from my fabric stash.

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This could possibly be 3 posts but I’m packing it all into one super, duper post. But I’ll keep it short- promise. Just a few observations from the world wide web.

I always am slightly amused by people on the internet. People who like to tell other people how it is, how it will be, how they should be, what they should say, what they shouldn’t say. It’s like 63.7% of people on the web think they’ve figured out all the things of life and are now totally in a place to tell the other 36.3% of us how to do it.

Profanity is one of these little irks of mine. And I’m totally on the fence, over the fence, through the fence. In fact, my philosophy on profanity is neither here nor there. I am not the same girl from 20 years ago in which “no unwholesome word shall depart from my lips” but neither am I the girl who says, “FML”. So, this leaves me squarely in the middle with a few thoughts on swearing, cuss words, the profane and the vulgar. There are categories. There are levels. There are definitely lines to be drawn.

When I was a wee one in grade school we had to read aloud in class from our reader. Remember readers? I loved them. I wish my kids knew what a reader was. Anyhoooo…….it was going to be my turn and I took my reader home to prepare(so studious I was). Upon discovering that my particular section had a “swear word” , I was mortified. I was also 8 . And in my 8 year old world there were a host of choice words we were not allowed to say, think or read….ever. And I told my mom that I was going to have to think this word, read it and say it all at once and it was too much for my heart to take. My mom was no help.( sorry Mom). She told me to do what I felt was right. Good grief. The short of it is this: I read it, I hated it and I felt a lot of guilt. But it was done and gone. So now you all want to know what word was in a grade 3 reader in 1979, right? The word was…………..”Gee”. OH THE INHUMANITY!!!!!!

Now before you giggle away the rest of the day, let me clarify. In our house a “SWEAR” word was any word that took the name of God or Jesus and used it inappropriately. Words associated with damnation and Hell were also terrible and unholy. Gee is short for Geeezzz…which is short for Jesus. I think we can all agree that this is in fact truth. So for me to say “Gee” was horrible.

My looses lips now say “Jeepers” Or “Gee whiz”( I used to say Cheese Whiz to get around it). I also say darn which is only the milder form of damn. Is that swearing too? Some would say it is.

My mom thinks fart is a swear. But my kids have been saying it since they could speak.

The fact is this: our usage of slang, swear, cuss, vulgar words is often for emphasis. Saying I’m really cold doesn’t quite get the point across that I am DANG cold. Darn, Dang, Damn……they all mean the same thing but progressively stronger.

My friend posted a comment a few days ago about the “assholes” in front of Toys R Us smoking. She’s right. They’re idiots. I don’t call people assholes because I don’t. It’s actually quite gross when you think about it. However, smoking is gross so maybe she is more right than I am. One person completely missed the point of her post and said “classless”….and “unfollow”‘……..because of the word “assholes”. Really?? I mean. In your real, everyday, walking around , enjoying life world you would actually defriend, dissociate, condemn, judge and unfollow a friend whom you had previously liked, agreed with, enjoyed because of the word “assholes”?? Listen people, if that’s how you do the internet, you might be in the wrong place. Stuff gets said all the time that I don’t agree with but I don’t even challenge it with a word or thought. I say stuff that people don’t agree with . I read stuff I don’t agree with. I love the people I don’t agree with. Opinions are good . My kids say stuff every day that ticks me off. I don’t write them off.

It’s silly, isn’t it?

Humanity- we’re all humans. Here’s a shocking statistic: 100% of the things you read on the internet are written by humans 100% of the time.

For some reason, there are a whole bunch of people on the internet who think they can say whatever they want to whomever they want all while sitting behind a keyboard and it doesn’t matter. Because *I* am the only one who actually has feelings, right? It’s all about *ME*. No one else could possibly feel the way I feel.

Ugh.

Seriously, writing a blog takes guts. And I’m not saying that because I have a blog. Because I don’t really have guts. I want to say stuff that I can’t. For a variety of reasons I am my own worst critic and #1 filter of all that is controversial or raw honesty. But I have friends who spill their guts and it is beautiful and inspiring. And then they get flippin’ yahoos inboxing or posting on their pages that ” you know that autism is a form of demonic oppression…” to the mom who has an autistic son. Really. Not even kidding.

Or , I have been the recipient of such dandies like this: “the article you posted was written by a gay man, I just thought you should know”…because of course being gay negates the possibility that you could have a brilliant mind and common sense t’boot!?

This happens all the time. Well meaning individuals think that they have all of life figured out. But they forget we’re all human, we all have feelings, we all learn and grow by being challenged to think outside of our own small, narrow view of things.

Which brings me to the war on Christmas.

There is none.

In 1979 our school pageant had the words “Happy Holidays” and “Season’s Greetings”. Was there a conspiracy then to undermine and usurp the traditions of Christmas?? *GASP*!!

In 1941 the movie, Holiday Inn was made. “Happy Holidays” was the theme song….now sung by generations. I particularly love the Williams Brothers and Osmond Brothers rendition…..have a listen….

I could ramble about this but I just want to ask you some questions:

1. Has anyone in your town, village or kabutz asked you NOT to say Merry Christmas?

2. Have you been told to take down your tree or lights or turn off the Christmas music?

3. Have you shopped in a major department store and heard one of these playing: “Silent Night”, “Joy to the World”, “O Come All Ye Faithful”?

4. Have you been publicly harassed for saying Merry Christmas?

5. Are you deeply offended by those who send you a card with “Happy Holidays” or “Season’s Greetings” on it- so much so that you have to return the card with a terse note about keeping “Christ” in Christmas?

….do you want me to go on?

I have Jewish, Athiest, Muslim, Mormon, Jehovah’s Witness and Agnostic friends. They are all very good at saying Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays and never once have been offended or hurt that I do the same.

There is no war on Christmas. There are a few media outlets who keep reviving this and challenging us all to stand up and fight. But there is nothing to fight. There is only a war if we take up arms. And I am not. Our town has nativities and carol festivals. I see trees, lights and hear carols everywhere I go. There is no war. Please stop posting the “I hear it’s offensive to say Merry Christmas….” type of forwarded emails and photos. It isn’t offensive. It never has been. Just because one dude in Saskatoon wants it to be an issue doesn’t mean we all have to jump on the bandwagon and make it one. Don’t give in. Be the same as you always have. Spread joy and cheer and sing loud for all to hear.

I don’t swear, but I may cuss a little sometimes. I don’t always agree with everything you post but I’m not going to call you out or publicly shame you because your opinion is different than mine. And there is no war on Christmas. Happy Monday.

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I’m way up in the northern part of Alberta, watching the snow fall gently on the trees. The wood stove is loaded for the day and there’s no one else around. It’s the perfect time and place to think about my loved ones and
consider the special things I can do for them for Christmas. Here’s my post from last year on giving thoughtfully.

This may be the most important advice I can give you when it comes to what kinds of gifts you should give.

Mark 12: 28-33

One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”

“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

“Well said, teacher,” the man replied. “You are right in saying that God is one and there is no other but him. To love him with all your heart, with all your…

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I’m reposting from last year’s series on Redeeming Christmas. You can catch all my posts here. I’m attempting to pull some of my favourite ideas and posts and bring them to a new audience for this year.

Gifts. I’m not really sure where to start with this. I used to love shopping. I actually still do~for other people. I like finding that one thing; the one that will make people cry and tug on their heartstrings. I love those kinds of gifts.

What I don’t love is shopping malls. I. HATE. MALLS. They are money pits that serve one purpose: indulgence. Bigger malls are being built with fancier stores than I ever recall being built in my entire 40+ years on this planet. Shoe stores, women’s stores, men’s stores, jewelry stores, toy stores, hat stores. Too many stores. And WAY too many people in malls on any given day.

I people watch and what I see in malls is a lot of people buying a lot of stuff that they don’t need and in 6 weeks won’t care about or want anymore. A lot of time and money is wasted in malls every year. And the other thing I see is stress. Stress on the faces of all those people. Frustrated, hurried, concerned and not at all cheerful.

2 Corinthians 9:7 Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

If we are to be cheerful givers, not under compulsion to give, not reluctant givers then why do we make the lists that lead us into a guilt-laden journey?

Can I tell you a secret? You don’t have to give anyone a gift for Christmas. You don’t! Really, I’m not even kidding. You DO.NOT. HAVE. TO.

Buying gifts to me should be intentional, for the purpose of building up, blessing and out of the generosity of our hearts. If we feel guilted into it then we have missed the point. If we don’t even like the gifts we’re buying, we’ve really missed the point. And if we are TOLD what to give and who to give to , then we are actually disobeying the Word of God.

Here’s my experience:

1. I don’t give to the same people every year. Some are the same but most are not. Of course I give to my kids; I want to . I enjoy it. But I don’t HAVE to. And they don’t HAVE to give to me either. I rely on circumstance and opportunity to dictate who gets gifts from me.

2. My parents and inlaws often do not receive gifts from us. I may really be stepping on toes with this one but I want you all to think about this. Our parents have lived longer than we have. They have every token, trinket, picture frame, sweater, appliance that money can buy. They are fairly self-sufficient and they also have quite a few kids and grandkids. Our parents like giving their grandkids gifts(if money permits) but don’t usually expect much in return. And I know what you’re thinking: ” All parents say ‘don’t get us anything’ , but they don’t really mean it; they’re just being polite.”‘ I disagree. Sure they probably love the thought of the gift but if you were to really have a conversation with them, they don’t want any more stuff. They don’t need it. They are trying to downsize and simplify along with the rest of us but they have 20-30 years on us! Now, my mom lives alone and I like to make sure she gets something from us , even if it is small. I will talk about *Christmas in a Box* in a later post. But unless we’re spending Christmas with one set of parents, we don’t generally send anything to them.

3. My husband and I go regularly without exchanging Christmas gifts. Gifts cost money. And when money is tight you trim the budget and the list. We don’t need anything else. If we want something and can afford it, we buy it. We don’t need a calendar to tell us when. Besides, we have a lot more fun buying for our kids and friends.Very often we will give a card that expresses in words how we continue to give our hearts and our lives to each other. I love those cards. They are priceless and they’re one of a kind.

4.If giving isn’t fun, I don’t do it. Ever. Remember that part about a cheerful giver? Ya, that one. I take that very seriously. The FUN of giving is well, fun! When I get something that someone is going to love or that I am going to love giving(because it’s silly, ridiculous or just plain awesome), I cannot tell you how great I feel. It is a rush. It is more fun than getting a gift any day, hands down. So if you’re one of those list people that beats the pavement to find the very thing your kid wants and you hate every minute of it, stop it. Just stop. Cheerfully. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself this question: ” What am I teaching my children , my friends and the poor clerks in the stores about my faith?” Ouch. Painful, isn’t it? You should never ever put a retail clerk on minimum wage through the ordeal of dealing with your crabby moods because you can’t find the exact colour or size of what Missy said she HAS to have. EVER.

5. Giving gifts should never put you into debt. Cash people. Use cash. If you don’t have it, you don’t buy it. Don’t justify under any circumstance the use of credit to buy someone a gift. It’s not worth it. On Boxing Day people wake up to their stupidity(overspending and needless debt) and also to the pouty same faces they saw two days before Christmas. Things don’t make people happy. Things don’t make kids more behaved. Things don’t satisfy. So, no debt. Say it with me : ” I will not go into debt this Christmas”.

6.I never expect a gift from anyone. Growing up poor has a lot of benefits. If you see your single mother struggle to put food on the table you darn well know not to expect a gift under the tree. And then when you get something, you appreciate it so much more. Don’t give your parents, your husband , your friends or anyone a list of what you’d like. Don’t Pin a Christmas Wish List board for all to see. Don’t cut magazine pictures and put them on your husband’s side of the bathroom mirror. Don’t send e-mail hints or set up gift registries. Don’t. Can I tell you a sad story? I know of someone who is middle aged. He has kids. A couple of years ago he went to his mother’s house for Christmas dinner. When gift opening time came around, his elderly mother had a gift for him and one for each of his kids. When he didn’t get more than one(as he had come to expect for his 40+ years of existence) he picked up his kids, stormed out of his mother’s house in disgust and made it clear to all in attendance how disgusted he was that all he got was “one measly gift”. You can’t make this stuff up. Pathetic. Ungrateful. Unkind. My shock and outrage…well, I’ve had to let it go because it doesn’t affect me. But what an awful thing for his mother to endure.

7. If a gift doesn’t make me think of Jesus, I’m not buying it. This might sound silly. But remember, we’re redeeming Christmas from commercialism and the *way we’ve always done it*. When we see people with the Father’s eyes and we love them the way the Father loves: lavishly, uninhibited and generously, then we will give accordingly. If you go to the dollar store just to fill up space in a stocking or give to a kid in the family who you don’t really know but feel obligated to give to, then that’s not really seeing them from a Jesus perspective. When you buy a gift you should see it as a reflection of your love for the person and the love Christ has for them(because obviously, we give to some people we don’t love very much…or love very well). If we spend too much on something that isn’t really that great, or if we buy because we’re in a rush or pressured or obligated, we won’t give the way Jesus would give. Consider the gifts that Jesus received as an infant: gold, frankincense and myrrh…special, selective, rare, expensive. We can’t maybe afford the expensive but we can afford to be selective, take some time and make it special. This is why handmade or rare gifts say so much. The sacrifice of our time and effort can speak to the recipient of a gift.

This topic of giving gifts is deep and wide. If you have some other thoughts or advice, please share. For most people who celebrate Christmas, the giving and receiving of gifts is the most important, central theme of their Christmas experience. In fact, there are many who believe that without the giving and getting of gifts there would be no Christmas. We need to cautiously examine the message that sends to our children and our larger communities. Redeeming Christmas~the renovation of what we’ve always done ~is not an easy, painless process. It will require a huge shift on our parts to become cheerful givers who are not bound by the same routine of obligatory gifts to the same people year after year. I look forward to hearing from all of you.

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I’m going to repost some of my favourite Christmas blog posts from the past. Many are from my series last year on Redeeming Christmas. You should probably read my Christmas manifesto to get the gist of what I was thinking when I wrote these.

Phrases like “bah-humbug” and “it’s too early for Christmas music” are not spoken or even thought of in my house. I love Christmas with every fiber of my being. Here is my Christmas philosophy:

I have a two-fold love of Christmas. I love that the name of Jesus is in every store , every mall, every public venue. I love that you can talk about Jesus, give and bless in Jesus’ name and even the most hard-nosed get caught up in the love and splendor of it all. I am simplifying this year but I LOVE the lights, I love the joy , I love the colours and the displays. It lights up the dark nights of winter and warms the homes of streets everywhere. This is what I love about Christmas. I think we can redeem Christmas if we admit that there is an element of commercialism and refrain from getting too caught up in it and if we intentionally light up our homes and offer them as a living sacrifice to our neighbourhoods and friends. If we become the light, the light will burn brighter the rest of the year. This is my prayer, my hope and my vision. I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!

But if I’m going to be honest~December 25 has nothing to do with Jesus for 99% of us 100% of the time. Truthfully, as much as we may want to *say* that it’s all about Jesus and giving and His birth and Him and Holiness and yadda-yadda-yadda…….blah, blah, blah…..oh bother…..we’re just as caught up in wrapping and getting and Santa and reindeer as the folks across the street. In fact, the folks across the street might not think there’s any difference between me and them. And they’re probably right ~when it comes to Christmas. We shop. We spend. We make lists. We want. We get. We want more. We spend more to get more to give more to want more. We’re on this hamster wheel and it’s going faster and faster and we’re not even sure there’s a safe way to get off even if we wanted to.

We are caught with our flannel underwear down like Santa taking a potty break under the evergreen tree. We are busted.

So, what are WE going to do about it?

If you’re like me and you love shortbread cookies and white twinkly lights and hot cocoa in festive mugs then you’re wondering how we can possibly keep the STUFF of Christmas without the STUFF keeping us from sharing Jesus and being the LIGHT in our very dark world. Because right now, the STUFF of Christmas is weighing us down BIG TIME. We have spent our way into the oblivious world of consumption and it isn’t bringing us closer to Jesus at Christmas, or any other season of the year. So let’s get off the wheel. Let’s take a break. Let’s re-focus before the season hits and find out what we can do differently this year.

I’m going to admit right here that I’m aggressively opposed to Santa. But don’t worry, your secret is safe with me~I won’t tell the kiddos…….yet. However, I hope that you might give me some grace to share my thoughts and maybe you could chime in from time to time and pull me back over a little too.

First up: confession time for all of us. Christmas Day, December 25 is NOT Jesus’ birthday. So pretending it is, may perhaps be the first place to start in deconstructing the myth of Christmas and how to redeem it for God’s glory, not our own. Perhaps you are a family that regularly has a birthday cake for Jesus; maybe even with party hats and candles. We never have done that. I wasn’t raised that way and I guess inevitably we pass on traditions , or withhold them based on how we grew up. I’m not so sure that having a *Happy Birthday Jesus* party is doing much to promote who Jesus IS and what HE came FOR. But, I suppose it’s not harmful either. Or is it?

My guess is(based on all the smarty-pants historians) today would be closer to Jesus’ real date of birth than December 25 is. In the last couple hundred years, December 25 has morphed from a pagan celebration into a Catholic tradition into what we have now: the most ridiculous mis-mash of displays, traditions, symbols and consumption. There’s nothing inherently *CHRIST* like about what we have now.

So for today, let’s just get back to TRUTH.

The TRUTH is that Jesus was born. Born of a virgin. Immaculate conception. Born in a manger to poor parents.

The TRUTH is that December 25 is NOT Jesus’ birthday.

The TRUTH is that we regularly fool ourselves into saying that Christmas is *all about Jesus* so that we can justify how we act, what we do and what we spend.

The TRUTH hurts. And in fooling ourselves, we have , I believe hurt Jesus. Because we aren’t proclaiming Him when we decorate trees and string up lights.

But here’s the REDEMPTION~~ WE CAN CHANGE. We can BE TRUTH, SHARE TRUTH and LIVE TRUTHat the same time as stringing up the lights and drinking hot cocoa around our beautiful trees.

So, fear not. Stay tuned. The Christmas season is drawing near(41 days!). And we can; WE WILL REDEEM CHRISTMAS for the glory of God, not the glory of ourselves.

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Me:Prairie Girl!

My name is Juanita and I live on the western prairies of Canada. It's not winter here all the time! Honest. But I do love winter. I love photography. I love my family and I love people. I have a passion for truth and I'm learning to temper that with love and gentleness...slow learner I think. ;)