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I don’t really make new year resolutions, but I did make a conscious decision to reduce the level of detrimental substances I ingest for the year. This includes meat, dairy and, as it turns out, social media.

While I don’t really associate wordpress with negative or stress inducing content, it was part of my online routine that included other social media sites that are chock full of divisive rhetoric. The less I checked my phone for updates the more I interacted with other people in real life conversations. I’ve been exercising more and swiping less. Changing my conditioned behavior to opt for reading a book, instead of a news feed, has drastically reduced my online presence but increased my general satisfaction levels.

Since cutting back on the internet I’ve noticed a dramatic improvement in my overall mental health, personal relationships, and physical health. Since the initial results have been positive I think my posts here will most likely remain infrequent for the foreseeable future. Unless, of course, there is any interest in participating in an attempt to ignite respectful online discussion/debate about relevant topics. If there is, that would be a project I would love to be involved in.

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Getting real tired of opening social media, turning on the tv, or any other type of news gathering option, just to see that the POTUS has once again tweeted some bullshit immature spout off instead of acting in a manner befitting his office. I’m sick of seeing the arguments and reactions it causes. I’m sick of the embarrassment (at best) and horror (at worst) I feel in response to the actions of the government I had very little say in electing. Made the mistake of watching a Netflix documentary called “What The Health” and that made me so fucking sad. Combine that with the very real effects climate change is causing all around me and it’s making it way too easy to want to give in to apathy and depression.

It’s a constant battle every day. Trying to motivate myself to not give in to despair. To rally and find causes worth putting effort into. Clinging to hope in the face of cold logic. Reminding myself to appreciate the little moments of joy I am privileged to experience daily. It’s a struggle, and I’m sure I’m not alone in it. Thank goodness for support networks. Thank goodness for the people who love me and the people who let me love them. For asshole cats who hug back. For the power of music and the feel of a hand holding mine. For that first bite of something delicious made with care. For humor in the face of fear. For hot baths and good books to get lost in. Thank goodness for the little things that allow me to keep going despite the raging swell of negativity that surrounds me. Some days tho…it’s all I can do to get out of bed.

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Every one deals with existential crisis at some point in their lives. Why are we here? What’s the point of life? What could my purpose possibly be?

Everyone has a different answer.

Christmas time is supposed to be a magical time where you can reconnect to that innocent spirit and remember your belief in magic, in miracles, in the basic decency of humans. Unless you live on Earth in the year 2017.

There is so much devisiveness, so many people and media outlets trying to convince people to pick a side. Hatred and fear infiltrating societies around the globe. Life sustainability threatened on a global scale. Planet that supports human life on the decline. Species going extinct at record rates. Crops and livestock suffering casualties daily. People attacking people every second. Peace on Earth…the most foreign of concepts that no one is willing to embrace anymore.

Is this the end times? Do we stand here and watch as people around the globe do one of three things? Do we watch as they ignore the problems humans have created? Do we watch as people kill one another and the planet we depend on? Do we help assist in the mass genocide of all living things on the planet? Or maybe we chose a fourth option. Maybe we stand and we look fear in the eyes and we say “No, not today, today we elevate and become what we’re capable of. We don’t give in to fear, to hate, to insecurity, and to destruction. Today we recognize that humanity and this planet is worth fighting for. We recognize that money is an arbitrary concept, that we are stronger together. We resolve to put in the effort, to be vulnerable, to choose creation instead of destruction. Today we can embrace the magic of the season and we can make a choice.

Choose life, or choose fear. Up to you, but think hard and think long. Because really it’s on all of us.