I am a turbaned Sikh man, yet I am a bit disturbed that many people that I have come across feel that I am too close to faith(Sikhi). My friends and family have told me to back away from Sikhi as they feel that I am becoming a fanatic. For starters majority of my friends and relatives have given up of keeping long hair and wearing a turban. I too want to cut my hair but I am conflicted. At my age all my friends have a girlfriend yet since I wear a turban this has kept the girls away from me. Girls have even said I look like a freak, or a caveman. Whether I hangout with my friends in a bar or a club my turban has always caused the conflict with the bouncer of the place as they do not permit people with turbans into their clubs or bars. I know many reading this many feel that I am taking the wrong step but what do I do? Is it so wrong to wish to be like everyone else? This turban and beard has created more problems and conflicts for me now I feel like maybe I shouldn't be wearing it at all.

5 answers

Yes, I understand exactly what you are talking about. People say, "so, have you become a baba now?" This is what happens when you walk on this path. Everyone wants you to be just like them because it makes them feel secure in their behaviors and beliefs. If our Guru wanted us to be like everyone else, we would not have our bana. He wanted us to stand out. We need to stand out so that people can easily find us and know "that person can help me. That person can feed me. That person can heal me. That person can defend me."

When you know who you are and are true to yourself that is called commitment. Commitment gives you dignity and grace. Dignity and grace bring you to your own divinity and happiness. If you have surrendered to your Guru and you trust Him to arrange your affairs, then what problem can there be?

Hey, I think you should be proud of yourself for standing out from everyone else and yes if you look like a freak then it will keep the wrong girls and guys out of your life. Don't change for others because in the end the only true relationship we really have is with waheguru and if you can be strong and just stay the way you are no challenge in life will be able to break you down. God is testing your faith and don't worry about girls not liking you when the right time comes you will find the right girl who likes the fact that if your faithful to your religion you can never break her heart :).

oh lost soul in this hour listen to the command of the guru. and you will sail the world ocean do not listen to the false family the true family is the guru and god.

Well, I cant force you but at least I can give you an advice that the step you are going to take is wrong! Guru taught us to stand out of the crowd. He made us all special. Some people insult you,make fun of you just because you are what they can't be! They don't understand the meaning of being a true khalsa. How can you ever make your decisions by taking the advice from the people who don't even know what it means?? that will be stupidity. Be what you are and if you really have faith in Sikhism, you will never leave it.

You are doing what your family and friends ask you to. You are thinking based on what a few girls say you have no freakin' interest or stake in your life. You have trouble hanging out with people in clubs and bars. You wish to be accepted. But it comes at a price. You wish to be moulded into the shapes people around you want to see you as. Sikhi is really anti-social in a way that it attacks the prejudices of the society. Think of a 200 years ago where a guy became a Sikh and he was ridiculed because he didn't pray in the temples in front of an idol. A Sikh who does Ardas in no particular direction or only in front of Guru Granth Sahib, wow that was unheard of in those times. Many have faced such problems, but we don't have to let them define us. Let your belief in Sikhi define you!