Insanity and/or blindness

Gender:

Male

I am 54 years old. As best as I can remember, I started masturbating at age 12. My father had told me that masturbating would cause insanity and/or blindness. I had been introduced to sex around that time by my cousins who were near my age. I remember how good it felt entering a woman and how hard my penis was. My first ejaculation was a surprise. My female cousin stopped having intercourse with me and her brother, and I wanted that feeling of ejaculation again. After that, it seems I was always playing with myself. We lived in a two-bedroom/one-bathroom house, so privacy was always at a premium. I would wipe my semen on a rag and throw it away. Later, I learned to ejaculate on my stomach -- and when I was younger I could "shoot" upon my chest.

When I went into the Air Force in 1963, masturbation was a no-no subject. Guys would say it would cause hair to grow on your palms. Of course, everyone would look at their palms. After basic training I got lucky and had a single room in the barracks. I would masturbate almost every day in my bunk. My blanket was almost stiff it had so much dried semen on it. One day I learned you could exchange your blanket when you exchanged your bed linen, so after that, I got a clean blanket every week. When I went to Japan, the price of sex was so low masturbation was almost unnecessary. (Except close to payday!) But the subject was still a no-no to discuss.

My first wife had a healthy sexual appetite, but she had self-image problems and sometimes was very difficult to be around. At those times, masturbation was a great relief provider. Later I met a woman who loved to masturbate me and I loved to masturbate her. It was a revelation to me that women masturbated. She taught me a lot about the female sex organs and how to stimulate them. And she had a great touch on my penis. She could stimulate me for what seemed like hours, but probably was only minutes. My semen would be expelled with such force it was almost excruciating.

I am very glad that masturbation has come out of the closet, so to speak. JackinWorld has provided a great service. I wish there had been a resource like this when I was younger. Not that I necessarily felt a lot of shame after I got older. Even now, I masturbate 2 to 4 times a week. I like to lie on my back and let my semen dribble out onto my stomach. I rub it into my pubic hair and let it dry. Sometimes when I stand and look into a mirror to stimulate myself, I will catch my "pre-cum" on my finger and lick it. At my age I don't get a lot of this fluid unless I let it go a little soft, and then I get a lot. I take zinc which makes your semen thicker and less likely to spurt unless there has been a lot of stimulation. My hope is find a mutual masturbation partner. I have never been with another guy while masturbating, but I would like to try it sometime. I think I would like to masturbate a guy and have him masturbate me. I guess the trick is to find someone who would be interested; unfortunately, most men my age still have a stigma attached to masturbation and especially anything intimate with another man.

My current wife likes to be masturbated while making love. She has been very ill lately, though, so I have been masturbating quite a lot.

All in all, masturbation has seen me through some trying times, and I hope to keep on as long as I can.

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Do you masturbate to make yourself feel good, or to try and imitate sex?