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Who are you and why is my template on your page? I haven't edited any of your articles. --THINKER 06:05, 10 June 2007 (UTC)

THATS WHAT YOU THINK!
welll actually i am The Avantgarde Musician....Jack i am brother of Leoispotter and trust me....... I'm the best avantgarde musician-guy cause even Mr.THESE has heard all my elephants.--Fonchezzz 12:18, 10 June 2007 (UTC)

Your insistence on writing abject nonsense all over the place is probably gonna piss someone off. Writing it in people's talk pages is mildly okay, because of 5iifialiiiike3499a*(***56, but writing actual articles that are two sentences long generally irritates people. Just to let ya know that the more nonsense you write, the more likely it is that you will piss somebody off. M'kay. Lecture over. --THE 18:23, 10 June 2007 (UTC)

AYE CAPTAIN! I take your warning with great awesomeness. However i may not have much to worry about... seeming I am a proud member of Famines Fan Club. Thankyou for the ducks. I love their special features.

Luck is toward your position. I am the man behind the in charge of the creation of Famine's Fan Club. Membership fees will be due two weeks ago. Be prepared. --Polystyrene Man 18:53, 11 June 2007 (UTC)

Cheerios, I will put this money to good use involving a woman and a straight jacket. Non-superfluous elephants would like to meet you sometime in the nearest past participle. Please check your mailbox frequently BUT DON'T LEAVE THE HOUSE. --Polystyrene Man 02:31, 12 June 2007 (UTC)

Over at the village dump they're discussing the fact that you, and now many other useless gobshites, lost their nominations because of minor bans. You might get another chance at Ugotm! If you do though, don't start going to a bunch of random people's talk pages and leaving random messages again, or you might irritate the uncyclopedia gods. Ah...yeah. --THE 14:54, 17 June 2007 (UTC)

IM A GOD A GOD OF INSANITY THE GODDESS IS ME TOO!
--Fonchezzz 01:25, 18 June 2007 (UTC)

THIS IS SO BEE-UH-YOU-TEA-FULL IT BRINGS A TEAR TO MY TEARS WHICH ARE TEARING MY EYES TO PIECES. MANY THOUGHTS ON THIS THOUGHTLESS NIGHT. --PhlegmLeoispotter*(garble! jank!) 23:39, 25 October 2007 (UTC)

You stay the hell away from people's talk pages (especially Zombiebaron's, that one can get you in lots of trouble) unless they start the conversation first. Got it? --T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 22:34, 18 December 2007 (UTC)
ok! I think you should warn me of the other rules before i slip up again... i tend to do that.--|Fonchezzz|Quacking| 00:34, 19 December 2007 (UTC)

Rule #1: Punch your brother in the stomach. Tell him THINKER sent ya!

Good to see ya back kid. Don't mess it up. ;) --THINKER 04:25, 19 December 2007 (UTC)

Hmm... while it was appreciated by the requester, you should know that that that review really isn't the sort that would be considered in-depth. As you seemed to be trying, though, and since I'm also trying to distract you while my associates plant duck meat in your fridge, I have decided to come by and rattle off a list of what you can do to improve in the future, in the hopes that you will do more and will improve and whatnot, and never mind the loud crashes coming from behind you; it's just, er... the wind. Yeah, it's the wind, not a bunch of guys breaking in through your bathroom window.

In all seriousness, though, it wasn't that bad for a first review. While looking at the guidelines is all very well and fine, you may have more luck figuring out what to do from looking at examples other people's reviews and seeing the ways they do it - many of the steel kidneys have compiled lists of their reviews, for instance, and you can also look here for Chief's evaluations of what ones are good enough and not. Since he is the decider of such things. The only one left, of late. The other ones appear to have died.

Anyhoo, I hope to see you around the pee review in the future. If, that is, you survive the horror they've hopefully now finished planting in your fridge. *whistles innocently* ~*shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101016 - 23:20 (UTC)

Hi Fonchezzz! Normally I see you around Illogicopedia (though I am rarely there most days) but if you feel like writing funny stuff, read the new and improved HTBFANJS and dig in! -- Simsilikesims(♀UN)Talk here. 16:42, June 17, 2014 (UTC)

Spike moved this here from the Forum as it doesn't concern site policy but is a request for guidance.

Hi, I am Jack. Or well for all intents and purposes, here I am Fonchezzz. I'm an avid writer over yonder on Illogicopedia. So I haven't really written a successful article on here, but the last time I tried was in 8th grade cerca 2009 or something. I have this idea for an article. It's a band page for a fictional band. Here's my reservation: it could kind of be seen as a vanity article which is frowned upon. You see, this fictional band isn't entirely fictional, it's a real parody band that a couple of my friends and I recorded an extremely silly album for. The name of the band is The Fonchezzz Experience, which just happens to be my pseudonym I use for everything I do. The band is a parody on the Hipster culture. The music is so awfully bizzarre and silly that the joke is the band "becomes super popular and gains a huge fanbase of hipsters just because the music is so darn strange." In reality, there is a mockumentary being made about the band, which when it is finished, I'd likely refer to on the band page. I'd also post links to listen to the music on soundcloud, so the reader gets the full expererience of the bizarreness of the band. So in my opinion, this isn't absolute useless vanity. There is going to be humor and satire that can be understood and appreciated by anyone who reads it. Since I have reservations about the Uncyclopedia community appreciating this satire, I thought it would be smart to ask before I write an article and get banned for vanity. I'll obviously begin writing it on my userspace so any skeptics can see exactly what it is that I am writing before whipping out the banhammer. Opinions?

In fact, the problem is that there is no way the reader or Patroller or Admin could tell it was not vanity. In fact, as the name of the band is exactly your Uncyclopedia name, I would instantly assume it was vanity. Another problem is that you would be creating a page no one would call for in this or any other encyclopedia, requiring that the reader guess the punch line in order to read your joke. Mainspace is not a totally free-form writing project but an attempt to write something that looks like an actual, useful encyclopedia. So my advice would be to take the same humor and work backwards from something that does actually exist in the real world — taking the time to, additionally, make the comedy relate in a clever way to the reality. SpıkeѦ18:52 20-Jun-14

PS--Reading your query more completely, I'd emphasize that you ought not use Uncyclopedia as a catalog of works that other people (or, probably, you) did elsewhere. That would mean that, instead of delivering humor to our readers, you are trying to divert them to other websites. That is an advertisement, for which you ought to pay our webhost, and a violation of our Terms of Service that I would delete automatically, without investigating how funny it was. SpıkeѦ18:55 20-Jun-14

Exactly. That's where my reservations were... since it is more of a "multimedia" project (I guess you could call it?) Thanks. I'll pursue that comedy elsewhere, while in the meantime trying to come up with a good idea to write for Uncyclopedia. It's been a dream of mine since i was a wee child. --|Fonchezzz|Quacking| 19:09, June 20, 2014 (UTC)

The best ways to find good ideas are to peruse Requested Articles or watch Special:RecentChanges and see what's going on in the wiki. To introduce yourself to other Uncyclopedians, open a Forum at B.H.O.P. The Village Dump is usually reserved for policy questions, discussing bugs, and big collective editing projects. SpıkeѦ19:15 20-Jun-14

Things are different where I come from. Illogicopedia is a land of beautiful messes, while this website is so much more structured. Thanks for your help; I'll try my best to contribute positively and with *shudder* logical satire. The requested artcile list should be fun to browse and brainstorm. Hey, you're a lot more friendly then the admins I dealt with during my first stab at uncyc. Thanks again. --|Fonchezzz|Quacking| 20:08, June 20, 2014 (UTC)

Thanks. I wouldn't say anything here had to be logical, just relate to something real, rather than reeling off lists of non sequiturs. As well as funny concepts, garden-variety discussions can be entertaining through choice of words. SpıkeѦ20:20 20-Jun-14