Author & Consultant/Trainer in Health, Social Care, and Management

‘Hello Suzan, You don’t know me, but I have read your book – ‘Beyond My Control: Why the Health and Social Care System Need Not Have Failed My Mother’ and wanted to tell you how much it has helped me.

My mother was in a care home and there were so many things that caused me anxiety and anguish about her care, I really didn’t know who to turn to at first, however, after reading the advice in your book I was able to get things moving.

There were so many issues we had to address that I was always expressing concern when things were not right for any of the residents, let alone my mother. Eventually, they realised that I was not going to let them get away with bad care. Again, we followed the advice in your book-we didn’t always visit at the same time or on the same day. And we saw different things happening, not all good!

I told the homes managers of my concerns. She was useless, so I did what you say in your book, I put my concerns in writing and I kept a copy. I thanked staff when they did well and told them when I knew [after reading your book] that things were not right, i.e. expecting mother to sleep on a wet, urine stained mattress [which smelt awful!] and be put to bed after tea time [although she didn’t always eat her tea, which meant she had to go right through until 7am the next morning to have something to eat]. She was put to bed at 6.30pm and lights out].

Similar to the good nurse in your book, this home had one excellent carer. She gave excellent care, empathy and understanding. She was with us at the end of mothers life having just completed a 14 hour shift, but didn’t go home as she could see that mother was nearing the end.

Thank you for sharing your story; it helped us at a time when we really needed it. The book helped my mother have a dignified death. Thank you. I am so sorry your mother did not have a dignified death. She would be proud if she knew what you were doing to help others. I will be thinking of my mother and your dear mother tomorrow, on Mother’s Day. I am shedding tears as I write. God Bless xx’

[Names omitted to protect identity].

My mum left me with a mission. A mission to ensure that no one will ever, ever suffer the way she did. A mission to get the message out there on what is good care and bad care and to raise awareness on how to report concerns if you or your loved one is receiving poor care, in a care home, nursing home, hospital or receiving care at home.

‘Beyond My Control: Why the Health and Social Care System Need Not Have Failed My Mother’ is available in Kindle and Paperback and can be bought from various websites including:

But you know it’s not about how many copies is sold. It is about getting the message out there, so why not ask your library to get copies in
Beyond My Control: Why the Health and Social Care System Need Not Have Failed My Mother