It rhymes with "Schmericka's Fest"

I have worn glasses since I was about seven years old. Very strong, very thick, Coke bottom glasses. When I was a child, the fashion was to wear a big lens – the bigger the better - so my glasses covered almost half of my face. Coupled with braces, straight oily hair, and a face full of acne – well, I was looking a little rough.

When I was a teenager, my father took me for contact lenses, and I wore those until I moved out of the house. Once I was living on my own, I could no longer afford contact lenses, and so I went back to big glasses.

I have not worn glasses full-time since I got married. (This is the point where my husband falls down in prayer and gratitude.) All of my children, though, have inherited my bad vision, and they all wear glasses. If not glasses, then contact lenses. We are very fortunate to have vision insurance, even though it is some of the worst vision insurance around. It only covers an exam every two years, but eye doctors will not write a prescription that will last longer than a year. So unless I want to buy the children - who are very tough on glasses - six pairs at a time, I'm usually stuck one year in, with trying to figure out how to get their eyes re examined.

I decided last week that I needed to buy my son new glasses. He's been trying to look through the scratches for several months now, and I also wanted to get a new pair for myself. The pair that I wear, although I only wear them at night and first thing in the morning, has a prescription that is more than 10 years old. They give me headaches. But also they are very, very unattractive, and although I know I don't look great in glasses, I thought I might be able to find a pair that was slightly less hideous.

Being that this is an off year for our insurance, I decided that my son and I would go to the place that rhymes with "Schmerika's Fest". After all, they offer two pair of glasses plus a free exam for just $69.95. I figured at that cost, I could afford for both of us to get new glasses.

My first hint that maybe this wasn't a good idea was in the initial exam, when I was asked if I wanted to spend $15 extra dollars per person to have the health of my eyes assessed. I was little puzzled– wasn't that the point of having eye exam? No, I did not want to spend $15 a person. The technician was baffled. Why would you not want to do that she wondered, surely your eye health is worth a measly $30?

No. Lead me to the next step, if you please.

Both eye exams went off without any further hitch. Neither one of our prescriptions have changed much, and so then we went out to choose our new frames. We both found frames, and then it became time to place the order. I had come in on a 2 pair of eyeglasses for $69.95 promo. Imagine my shock when I was handed the bill for more than $500.

Five. Hundred. Dollars.

I asked why there was a difference. I was told mumbo-jumbo about "difficult prescriptions", the age of my son, how thick my lenses would be, and the fact that we needed plastic lenses, because my eyes were supremely difficult to fit and so on and so on. In fact, my eyes were just so supremely difficult to fit that the eye doctor walked right into the back room and pulled out a standard pair of contact lenses. That's how difficult my prescription is.

My two pair of glasses alone totaled $228. When I asked how much it would be if I only bought one pair of glasses, I was told $268. Apparently, you get a $40 discount if you buy a second pair of eyeglasses. Tell me, in what world does this make sense?

I declined to purchase my glasses. I did however, purchase glasses for my son, mostly because he has a very difficult time finding glasses that he likes, and he had found two pair that he really did like. When we ordered them though, I made very certain that I discovered what his pupillary distance was, so that I will never be forced to buy glasses at this price again.

I knew I could have bought eye glasses online, but we needed new prescriptions, and I thought $69.95 was a good deal. After all, I'd pay more than that just to get our eyes examined anywhere.

I then went to Walmart. I could've ordered my own eyeglasses online, except that I do not know what my pupillary distance is, and I don't want to guess at it. So I went to Walmart, found a cheap pair of frames for $18, and bought a pair of glasses for less than $40.

And I found out what my pupillary distance is. So now, at least for both of us, I can buy glasses online.

And you better believe that I am not going back to the place that rhymes with "Schmericka's Fest".

Comments

Coastal.com -- a lot of times they have run "free" pairs on Facebook for first time buyers...yes, it cost some because my prescription is higher, but I bought a pair that I love and wear all the time...

Other than that I am pretty exclusive to Target Optical...not a lot out there, but the eye doctor at mine is awesome & the people are so nice and helpful.

We had the every-two-year vision insurance for a long time, too. It's almost worse than having NO insurance because if you have no insurance, at least places usually give you discounts. And Walmart/Target/etc. don't do eyeglasses in Oklahoma. In fact, there are NO places to purchase cheap glasses. I'm sorry you had such an awful time :(

Okay, I'm stumped, what on earth is "Schmericka's Fest"? I have terrible eyes and so far two out of three of our kids wear glasses. We have our eyes checked at an opthamologist (I couldn't tell you the difference between him and an optometrist, especially after I asked a question about my son's eyes and he said I should ask our GP...). He hands us our prescription and we go to Walmart. Besides the big selection, they have a great one year warranty. If the kids' eyes didn't change so often I could easily get over a year out of one purchase.

I am so with you on "Shcmericas". I too wear heavy lensed glasses - and no contacts due to a cornea transplant. My eyes are also two vastly different prescriptions - ahhh, old age :)
Had I bought from them, my two pair would have cost over $600.00 - and that did not involve designer frames. I was also told I have a difficult prescription.
Took my prescription to Walmart - 2 pair for just under $150.00 - photogray tint included - it was on special.
Glad to be back commenting - and did you miss me?
Broke my arm in 3 places 10 days ago, needed surgery and now a cast for weeks and weeks - yee-ouch:(

Thank you for this review! We lost our vision insurance last year and my oldest son and I both need exams. He wants contacts & I know I am out of time & bifocal bound at last. (I've been putting it off for 2 years) My usual doc charges $75 an exam, no glasses included, so I've been considering the $70 with two glasses deal for myself. I didn't want to start over with a new doc on the contacts. Somehow I suspect those bifocals will make me 'difficult'. I guess I will do my usual of seeing our doc and taking the prescriptions to Wal Mart

I too am baffled by "Schmericka's Fest." I don't think we have them in my town.

I'm glad to hear another endorsement for buying glasses online. I have an eye doctor appointment (optometrist? ophthalmologist? I don't know but I'm bummed because I'm not seeing the cute young one) Thursday and really want both glasses and contacts this time around. My plan sounds better than yours, but this would still set me back probably around $400 if I bought them both at the office, so I'm looking to go the online route. The last time I bought glasses, subtle, minimalist frames were in, so I'm kind of excited about getting one of the more bold styles and actually wearing them during the day.

Wow! I'm glad I've never checked them out.I've thought about it, but I so rarely go to the bigger city near us that its never happened. That's crazy about the prescription, and I thought we had wild ones in my family!

We have the every two year insurance but I have the kids staggered so it helps. Just took my 10 year old to the eye doctor for her over due checkup and found out that she has high pressure in one or both eyes. he is going to recheck her in a week to be sure but if it were not to be under control by eye drops, then it could lead to glaucoma. Who would have thought an 10 year old would have high eye pressure?
I know and trust this eye doctor since we went to church with him.

Wow!

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Carmen Staicer is a whirlwind of energy and execution, who never sleeps and drinks way too much coffee. She works from home as Social Media Programs Manager for SheKnows, and is the mom to six kids, most of whom play instruments, sing or dance and all of whom are much smarter than she will ever be. In other words, her house is never ever quiet or still. A concentration of asthma, food allergies, spectrum disorders and learning disabilities means that she spends an awful lot of time second guessing herself and Dr. Googling, as well as learning to cook everything the family might like to eat. In her spare time, she enjoys reading, boxing (she has her Black Belt in Muay Thai), sleeping, exploring coffee shops, photography, ballet class and cooking. She excels in being a smart mouth and has her major in sarcasm, with a dual minor in BS studies and avoiding laundry.