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As entertainment critic Roger
Ebert once said, "If you disagree with something I write, tell me so, argue
with me, correct me--but don't tell me to shut up. That's not the American way."

That's what we're currently being asked to endure. If you can stand to keep going with it -- and given tonight's empty ECST for The Big Untwist, it looks like no one could -- then the HoH competition is currently in progress. Not that the winner may get to nominate anyone for eviction. That's a rule, and rules? Are a joke. Just like everything else about this show. No, Julie, don't give the percentage of votes on the air or they'll get a number to question. Sure, if only one coach wants to return, everyone else is screwed because we have to make sure this is undone. And the entire week leading up to this moment meant nothing. Endure that.

I posted my thoughts on the twist in the ECST but the reset button may be the worse of all. What was that? Each coach had a contract so each should have been free to decide. At least, it should have been unanimous to join or else they stay the same but no, BB had to make it so all the coaches return.

You know what? Malin gained some respect by being the one to pass on the stupidity. I can understand why Brit and Dan hit the reset button (would you like to depend on Danielle? The twist royally screwed Shane) but I was disappointed in Janelle.

(Of course, they must have figured that Dan and Brit would reset the game so they may have had ulterior motives: Janelle showing she's a competitor, Malin wanting to say he had nothing to prove.)

I might be inclined to pick Britt or Ian. Low body mass people should do better in this type of contest, IMO. Shane might hang in there too. He's not too massive, and he should be scared/motivated after getting his HOH screwgy.

They've asked for privacy to possibly work out a deal. They are back and they're still on the wall. Or at least were as I wrote this. By the time I post it I imagine Ian has won HOH....oops, I took to long.Seems Ian dropped, then Brit followed to give HOH to Danielle.

No, Danielle, that was not directed at you as an insult to your height. It just means I really don't care to put much work into any summary. But I'm sure you'd nominate me for it anyway (along with so many other reasons). You had Janelle at the top of your nomination list for a while, and what was your openly-expressed reason? She wasn't cheering for you during the competition. You're not the deepest trench in the ocean, are you?

But for now, you're looking at Wil and Frank for your block targets. Or Shane's. Or Britney's. Possibly Dan. Does it even matter? And did you notice that you can't even get Shane into a showmance when you've got all the power? He hugged you last night. And that's all he did. You probably saw it as progress. Or Stage One. Or part of your inevitable testimony to the jury after you pin him against the wall and take it by force. You know why he kissed you in the water right after you won? Because it was the single best way to control everything you did for your entire term. And he will. But you can't see it that way...

What's with you? Hamsterwatch said you read your letter from home with resentment. Did they try to tell you how Shane really felt? Was it one of the relatives who gave you so many sad stories to tell? Did your hospital call and suggest you stay away from the better-looking patients?

Frank's upset because the HoH wasn't a level playing field, did you notice that? Him and Malin moping around, saying the first three weeks were a waste? You probably picked up on Shane groaning about how his HoH was a total waste of time. 'Waste' came up a lot last night. But I think you missed Malin's depression. Turns out I was wrong about his ego. It's there, sure -- but it was there as a coach this time. He wanted the winning player, he'd realized he couldn't do it on his own. He openly said he worked harder in this game than in all of B.B.A.Stards, and he was having fun with it. And now he's slumping about as if quitting is the only thing on his mind. Janelle was talking him down from the ledge last night. You missed that. But you would have put her on the block for it anyway because she didn't do it for you, so it really doesn't matter.

Danielle's letter was from her mother. The only family she told about going into the game was her godparents. Given all the horror stories she's spread around the house about Life With Father, hearing from the maternal unit probably wasn't high on her want list.

Malin confirmed that the coaches were paid to show up: $20k. Mention a prior season and cut the feeds: talk contract and all goes through.

Wil wishes he was on The Real World. Wil wants a ten-year DAW career out of this.

Shane gave Danielle a backrub. He knows his game now and he's playing it and her. The ultimate results will be uglier than you may want to think about right now.

And we got this:

Britney: "At the end of the day, it's going to be one hundred percent your decision."Danielle: "But I don't play that way."

Malin's reason for continuing to film dual DRs with Frank? It's his subtle way of auditioning them for TAR.

(He seems to be in 'Why did I even show up?' mode, wondering why he gave up so much time with his son. Humanity from Malin. I have a hard time assuming it's not faked.)

Frank seems to be shifting between states. At one moment, he's aware that he was thisclose to going out the door last night -- Joe told him where all the votes had been headed, and he truly felt he was safe going into the not-eviction -- and the next, he's calling the Reset Button the @#$% You button. Which is true -- but regardless, it saved his game life. (For now.) And he's still mad at having had to go through what he felt was a female-favoring contest.

Danielle still seems to be going with Frank & Wil as her nominees, fulfilling Shane's earlier directive. (A lot of Wil resentment is manifesting in the cage.) There's been no sign of a Have-Not competition, but the house is on interior lockdown -- it could happen later.

Am I in the minority? I enjoy players like Frank and Boogie the most. They add entertainment. I am rooting for either them or Ian. THe women contestants for the most part are boring. I like Britney this season, but she's going after Frank and Boogie so I am rooting against her. GO Team Boogie!

So far, the aftermath is still stewing, seeing that the house seems to still be in a "blame Janelle" mode with Britney leading the way. Wil practically volunteered to go up, and I don't know why. But I doubt he does, either.

Boogie isn't happy, which make me very happy.

Ian and Dan made a deal. Ian and Britney also made a deal. Ian's getting around.

I haven't read anything about Ashley and Jenn Who? all day; even Joe's been quiet, relatively speaking, of couse.

If anyone has the feeds, or knows a site that follows them minutely, NOW is the time to watch. Mike Boogie, of all people, is having to be talked into playing the BB game. Dan is trying to perform his best coaching job yet in getting Boogie interested. Boogie wants to keep Frank as a prerequisite, though, and Dan's not into that.

It's actually almost sad in a way to hear Boogie so morose about being lied to. But not really. (I was anticipating seeing a "Dustin face"-type reaction on Thursday.) He actually said the Dr says he's not bringing the magic.

Comedy is Ian forming a new alliance with Britney, Danielle, Dan, and Shane -- then getting kicked out of it because Dan saw him talking to Boogie. (About what? Does it matter?)

High comedy is Danielle freaking out because now the cage knows she's athletic and they already knew she was a genius.

Transcendent comedy is Malin depressed about how sad it is in the cage because everyone there has lied to him.

All this is prove once and for all that he pretty much has no game of his own, yes. But I'm really starting to think he was actually emotionally invested in the coaching. He knew he'd never win on his own, but he convinced himself he could lead someone else to the victory and add another layer of cement to his sunken reputation. And now he's Just Another Player who's convinced himself he's also The Next Backdoor.

He's also been talking to Dan about some of the various scandals currently orbiting his life, fairly openly. (Janelle has just been spreading knowledge of them behind his back.) You could almost get the impression that other than his son, this is just about all he has. And it's going to go bye-bye -- if not this week, then soon.

I'd feel sorry for him, but it's Malin. He could still be lying.

In other news...

...Dan & Shane are pretty much secretly warring for direct control of Danielle: Shane has been more open to contact and Dan just keeps pulling those strings. He had to virtually yank a few: Daneille almost went Frank/Malin before he brought her back to the original plan.

...beyond her dubious emotional state (which may or may not be helped by the fact that Janelle has shimmied her way into HoH and played Girls Bond Together with her), Danielle is not in great physical condition. She has bad bruising on both arms, and she's claiming the injuries go deep -- residue from the HoH competition. It's bad enough that a medic checked her in the DR.

...Britney took some time to warn Danielle about The Evils Of The Internet and advised her not to check anything after her departure if she's sensitive. And this after Danielle asked her how the post-HoH kiss looked. Start worrying.

(She did suggest Danielle could look at Hamsterwatch. Dingo is considering going into Witness Protection.)

...Kara and JoJo have been released to the world, so any future Revive-A-Hamster won't include them.

...current target seems to be Frank, but no one's really considered The Veto as much as they normally do -- maybe because so far, it's been The Shane. (Janelle has said she might save Wil, but that's been about it.)

Then again, cage speculation is that they're looking at a puzzle because most of the group is still wiped out from the endurance run. Throw a major mental element in and Shane might fold faster than Malin's self-confidence.

She told Dan that because she's a girl, he has to put her in check. Add that to her saying she's praying in the house because it works and it might help other people to believe, I'm starting to think she's the sort of Good Southern Christian Woman who will always take the second position in life because the Bible has convinced her only males are allowed to be in first. Nurse -- but would never consider going for doctor: she's just too religion-defined weak to be trusted with that kind of responsibility. So haul her along, men of the cage, and let her sit next to you at F2, because $50,000 is all she wants.

On the other hand, she did win Veto, but you have to figure someone told her to do that.

(Fair Use from Hamsterwatch: "I'm calling it: with six major comp wins between them already and cocky (but possibly accurate) arrogance that will continue, a dysfunctional show/nomance, falling for whatever's said by the last hamster they speak to, full-time focus by feedmasters, and no Big Brother knowledge other than CBS seasons they saw in pre-show hotel sequester, Shane & Danielle are the new Brendon & Rachel.. don't say I didn't warn you." Fear.)

This seems to have been a pass-a-prize/punishment Veto. Ian continued to play his strategy of piling on the punishments -- to himself. He originally won a trip to Hawaii. And now Jenn has it, because Ian said he got $2k more than her and he had to make it up. What did Ian get? Twenty-four hours dressed in a dog suit. While living in a doghouse in the backyard. If he wants to go to the bathroom, he has to signal for walkies and go on his leash. He's not allowed on the furniture. He has to eat and drink from a bowl. He's thrilled because it's still better than the Have-Not room. (There's a sleeping bag in the doghouse.) And Ashley? Was aroused by all of it. Of course, nothing's going to happen unless she's actually in heat, but they've got a few weeks left: her cycle could come around...

Other handouts: Wil received $5k, Frank got the mandatory unitard -- it's a cheerleader theme (complete with pom-poms) and it's already broken: the zipper broke, the skirt isn't attached well, and the top half has been ditched, so if you want to see what it looks like, you are on your bloody own -- and Shane gets to play in next week's Veto competition regardless of nominee status or draw, which remains one of the most useless prizes ever. Seriously, you'd think they'd at least give him a cheap gift card instead.

(It has a sort of use at this stage of the game: it makes it slightly riskier to plan on backdooring the recipient because you know they'll be playing for the blingie. But gawds, it ain't much.)

So if Danielle wants to backdoor someone -- oh, who am I kidding? If Dan or Shane want to backdoor someone this week, the option is completely open. Go after Malin as a mercy kill? Take out Janelle to keep her from trying out her competition skills in the late game? Keep the target on Frank because he's got the unitard and The Unitard Is Death? Decisions, decisions, decisions. And none of them are hers.

And Fair Using again from Hamsterwatch, here's the current state of the Twenty Zillion Alliances. As always, this was out of date while it was being written.

Leftover Coaches: any combo of two

Leftover Teams: any remnants still present

Froogie: Frank, Malin

Moodies: Janelle, Wil (And how! -- although it's mostly Wil. Emotionally, his highs seem to be high and his lows dig mine shafts all over Burbank.)

Ixies: Janelle, Ashley

Play Misty for Me: Dan, Danielle (This refers to Dan's ability to fog out anyone listening to him.)

Dan's Ultimate Mist: Dan, Danielle, Britney, Shane

Nomance: Danielle, Shane

Nomance Junior: Ian, Ashley (Ironically, this may be the one where something has a chance to happen, if only for thirty minutes.)

Girlpower: Janelle, Britney, Ashley, Jenn, Danielle (Barely. Danielle can't decide how she feels about Janelle for ten minutes in a row and there may be religious issue conflict with Ashley -- Hamsterwatch dropped a hint in that direction. The group most prone to internal fracture every five seconds.)

Duckie: Dan, Danielle, Britney, Shane, Ian (Dan allowed Ian back into this group the other night, so the swearing-up ceremony, in which they all lie about undying loyalty over Ian's duck, may be back on.)

Sixum Avengers: Dan, Danielle, Britney, Shane, Boogie, Frank (New as of yesterday. Do not try to decide who plays which role without serious work and if you make Dan into Steve Rogers, there will be trouble.)

Everybody: Dan ('Everybody' may be an understatement.)

Everybody but Nobody Really: Britney

Viewers' Choice: Ian

Discard and draw. And draw, and draw, and draw...

Danielle thinks she and Shane are America's new favorite couple. She also told a broken cheekbone story. The others topped her. She must now go break something else.

He's in a really tricky position in the one usual way: if people start actively comparing notes, he's dead. Janelle has already noticed how he's always hanging around on the edges of conversations, along with his tendency to perpetually gather news from you in a direct talk while never giving any back. But his fog effect seems to render most people's brains into happy obedient pea soup. Danielle may be his best ally ever -- she almost wants someone thinking for her. Of course, that means he has to control Shane too. Which isn't hard -- but guess who she'll ultimately follow.

Janelle is the one person that isn't in his alliances and that could be trouble but, as for comparing notes, it really isn't that much of a problem. There are SO many notes to compare that you can always cover your trail...if you know how to talk to people.

Speaking as a "southern Christian woman" I'd say she pretty much whipped their butts! Being southern and Christian doesn't make one a wimp. I'm offended also that apparently being a nurse isn't good enough either. Your generalizations are as ignorant as you claim her to be. Now she should go with her own instincts and not allow Dan or Shane to lead. The show pretty much sucks this year!

Speaking as a half-breed godless Northern social liberal who works in the unholy industry of adult entertainment specifically in order to destabilize the moral fabric of America? I have known women from Danielle's rough area who think and act in the way I've described above. I've known ones who don't. To me, she comes across as the former. It's my impression of her based on available evidence. I can be wrong -- but I'll need some evidence going the other way. Your mileage may and has varied.

So it goes.

(And the same personality types show up around here as natives. But for the South, it's almost a character trope -- one which the show would be happy to cast for -- and frequently an encouraged lifestyle, especially for some faiths. If you don't know anyone like that personally, way to beat the odds.)

If you're waiting for Danielle to strike out her own, I'd advise against breath-holding. From all indications, the plan to backdoor Janelle pretty much began and ended with Dan, right down to the rehearsed excuses given out after the Veto ceremony ended. Danielle has already said she basically sees Dan as a father figure, and given the nightmare she keeps describing of her family life, she may have been looking for one since roughly the age of five seconds: she's not going to take an immediate chance on offending this version. She will listen and she will follow.

The question almost becomes 'Who does she emotionally need more: the comfort of a substitute parent or the protection of a loving man?' That's a rough call. Shane is reluctant to lead her on romantically -- most of the time: that kiss after she won HoH may have had a little too much plan in it. (Then again, that may be the least offensive and most public-airwave kiss delivered to an HoH all season.) But if he went all-out Drew on her and led her down the garden path with promises of rings and vows and Happily Ever After? I feel he'd win her away from Dan in the time it took her to jump on top of him again.

Is it possible that Danielle's playing the emotionally needy submissive in order to be viewed as a non-threat and make it deeper into the game? Wouldn't that be a tactic to behold. Lots of people have deliberately undercut their challenge efforts in order to move down the cage's elimination schedule -- but to carefully hollow out your entire personality? It's a rare hamster who could make that one work. I won't call the odds on it as zero -- just very close to it. You'd think that by now, we would have seen some form of wink-wink nudge-nudge see-how-I-just-fooled-them in the DR, or at least a knowing side glance towards the feed cameras. So either she's the greatest actress in genre history who added in a million sad stories to keep the audience more-or-less enthralled, a full-out case of Disassociative Personality Disorder, or this is her. Place your bets carefully -- but personally, I'll go with 'This is the real Danielle'. And that may make independence the narrowest space on the Wheel Of No $500K Fortune.

I think the best chance of having Danielle go independent is if the majority of the cage utterly rejects her -- with special emphasis on the two men in her current life. Should Shane get through with any version of 'The only interests I have in you are your vote and beating you in front of the jury' and Dan's fifty billion alliance variations finally reach one that openly includes her out plus the rest of the cast breaks down laughing at the sight of her betrayed expression, then she might grab the whip and start flailing in all directions. Shane might do his part there: he's got the lack of long-term thinking to blurt something out in a really bad moment. Dan -- more guarded, more careful, completed a tour of this minefield once before without being blown up, and that was right after his army buddy hit the biggest charge on his first step. He's gotten to know Danielle. Carefully. At this point, he has to have a really good idea where most of the buttons are and how not to push the bad ones. He could get caught in a lie -- but I don't feel he'll ever infuriate her in direct conversation. Not until close to the end, when it's too late to do anything about it. And even then, he might have her vote.

So someone has to get her mad. Multiple someones. And then she could take revenge as only a good southern Christian woman can: with maximum damage to all parties involved --

Well awesome! Some of my best friends are half breed, godless ,northern social liberals! I think as far as this season goes I have to just hope Ian can survive to the finals. He's the only truly interesting person on this show.

Because Danielle did -- for another show. One of her friends was on Sweet Home Alabama (dating series, CMT) and she filled out the forms there along with submitting a video. That's how she got here: the footage found its way to the BB casting porta-john. So if you're wondering why she keeps acting like she's here for the romance? It's because she's here for the romance. There's a good chance Ian is the only person among the fresh meat to actually audition. And the rats? Had a dog suit waiting.

More not-fun stuff. Most of the day was endless game talk and alliance shifts, but it boils down to...

...Danielle was thinking (or someone was, anyway) about using the Veto to take Wil off the block and backdoor Janelle. Imagine how much the DR has been scrambling to undo that one. But it still seems to be in play as of a few minutes ago, with Britney working both sides: crying in HoH over what she's about to do, then going and having a pleasant game talk with the person it's going to be done to. Janelle may have suspicions as to what's approaching -- she's being left out of things and that sends the flag up the pole -- but there's nothing definite yet. Very few plans in this cage have gone over five minutes before passing on: we'll see how the lifespan on this one runs. However, the planners took a straw poll on this and felt Janelle would leave 5-4, so...

...and yes, Dan is involved in this: you had to ask? His newest alliance may be with Malin & Frank. Remember: taking Malin to the end might be his best shot with any jury that goes with 'but you already won' as their voting excuse, and Malin desperately needs a thinking partner. He's already verbally turned on the other members of his former team -- free agent available, will work for votes.

...two Ashley rumors this morning: she supposedly knows Janelle outside the cage, and she may have Graves' Disease. No confirmation on either, obviously.

...this might become important later: both Danielle and Britney speak Spanish -- well enough to keep a little alliance talk incomprehensible to much of the house.

...Wil confirmed the recursive music: he sang the show's theme song and sent the feeds to fish -- with theme song playing. Two for two.

What's this with backdooring anyone this week? They put Frank on the block, he can't save himself so vote him out. They make the game so hard for themselves when it really isn't.

Janelle trusts Brit and Danielle a bit so you keep her. Frank doesn't trust them anymore and never will. Boot him. Of course, if Dan's the real HoH then he may have earned Frank's trust by blabbing about last week's plan. But, as he said, keeping the coaches gives him a shield.

>What's this with backdooring anyone this >week? They put Frank on >the block, he can't save >himself so vote him out. >They make the game so >hard for themselves when it >really isn't. >>Janelle trusts Brit and Danielle a >bit so you keep her. >Frank doesn't trust them anymore >and never will. Boot him. >>Of course, if Dan's the real >HoH then he may have >earned Frank's trust by blabbing >about last week's plan. > But, as he said, >keeping the coaches gives him >a shield.

He's out of the costume and the rats neglected to get the dinner shots with everyone else at the table and him eating on the floor.

Also, Danielle (who has come down with HoHitis) tried a backrub exchange with Shane as the next step in her campaign. It went exactly where all the others did.

Malin has come back to psuedo-life and is talking game once again. Hamsterwatch speculated that the rats might have let him call Will. Because, you know, no contact with the outside is the rule and they've broken every other one.

And there are twenty-eight traquillion new alliances. (Dan is in all but three.)

So Danielle won the veto and now is considering taking Wil off the block and backdooring Janelle. I actually like this idea, since it will keep Frank in the game (I find him entertaining, but am not thrilled he has hooked up with Boogie) but I don't think it is good game play for Danielle. If she does this, she will have both Wil and Frank still in the game who are ticked at her and will be gunning for her next week. Right now Janelle is not going to target her next week, so I don't see why she is so concerned about getting her out....but who says the hamsters moves need to make sense?!

The Veto meeting is wrapped up: feeds came back online at 2:37 Eastern and found Janelle on the block. I'm waiting to finalize this post until I see who came off.

Janelle is up in HoH with Danielle, who is reading off the script Dan gave her: I heard you were coming after me (because I'm an athletic genius), repeat. And now Danielle is pretending to cry. She's doing that for the viewers because it totally works and maybe they'll start doing it too.

...okay, there's Frank: he's talking to Ian and making sure he has that vote. So Wil was the saved party. And now Wil can go gloat about what has been done to his former BFF. It's a good thing for his next one to keep in mind.

Makes you wonder how much the rats are freaking out right now. There was an EW interview with the Chenbot in which they asked her if this untwist was fair to the newbies because the veterans had Immunity for a third of the game. Her extremely coached response: it's perfectly fair because if all of Dan's players had gone out, he would have followed. And once again: bull@#$%. You can knock out four veterans in a row via vote if you get lucky. It takes three cycles to remove one coach. This was all about saving the 'stars' --

Dumb move for Danielle. No matter who leaves, she will have two strong players gunning for her...Unless Dan's alliance with Frank also includes Danielle. But then that would mean hanging Shane up to dry and Danielle wouldn't do that, would she? Or was Dan counting on splitting up Shanielle? If so, he'll be moving back up in my esteem.

While reading the following -- Fair Used from Hamsterwatch, I freely admit it, because I refuse to even try to untangle this giant mess -- ask yourself the following: is Danielle doing this on purpose, or is she really not aware of the distortions?

Neither answer may be uglier than the other.

"As we rejoin our story.. during an outside lockdown, I had a severe flashback to Big Brother 6 when Danielle, Britney & Ashley lounged together and whisper-trashed Janelle who was across the yard.. it was uncanny how similar the scene was to Maggie, April & Ivette, almost line for line at times.. I'm not calling them Nerd Herd 2.0 as they aren't a cohesive trio at all, but let's just say the shoe fit for awhile there.. this is probably my best cap of the season - clicky for a larger version, and happy chopping"

For the illustration, go to http://www.hamsterwatch.com/ For those of us who suffered through the Diet Of Maggots, it's genuinely disturbing. Females can gang up in very specific, sometimes predictable ways -- but this many echoes at once is hard to do. Or take.

"Janelle paid a visit to Danielle after dinner to shmooze a bit, fish a bit, and plant a few seeds.. they were very friendly to each other, discussing votes and the like, plus girltalk.. Janelle offered to leave some dresses behind for Danielle.. they complimented each other a lot and while it perhaps wasn't sincere on either side, it sounded friendly

And then the retells began"

Please have your scorecards and telephone tag charts ready.

"Danielle told Britney first, and the story changed dramatically from it being a friendly chat to an attack by Janelle.. it got progressively more dramatic with each retell to Dan, Ian, Boogie, Shane, and Frank.. some people think I make this stuff up but I'm telling you, if I could do that, I'd be making a living as a writer.. when I put quote them on this page or Twitter or Facebook, or in Lines of the Day, it's verbatim unless noted otherwise

With that in mind, Janelle's "we're friends, I didn't expect you to put me up" evolved in the retells to "you were supposed to be my friend, why would you put me up?" to "I can't believe I got backstabbed by a friend!".. Danielle's "I feel really bad about putting you up against a guy in a spiritard" became Janelle's "you even put me up against the one guy I can't stand, in a spiritard"

During the initial chat, Danielle said "why are you being so sweet to me?" but her retells included "I knew the rage was coming" and "she keeps making stabs at me, and stabbing, and stabbing, and stabbing, and stabbing".. again, I couldn't make this up if I tried.. Flashback 8/6 8.03pm for the original - the retells began at 10.17pm and just kept coming, and escalating"

Nothing like a gossip circle, is there? And you don't need a single bit of truth anywhere in it as long as someone's willing to listen and the victim is willing to die. No harm done -- to anyone who counted.

"Shane offered himself up as a pawn again, against Joe - Britney scolded him for that one (see Lines of the Day below).."

"Frank shmoozed Shane & Danielle by telling them Janelle had only been nominated twice in two seasons - and they bought it! Try 11 times, the BB record - see Attwx.com for the details plus more interesting BB stats of all kinds"

Keep in mind that both Shane and Danielle were recruited, and Shane had never even heard of the show before being cast for it.

"The retells eventually died down and Shane started to fall asleep in Danielle's bed.. she roamed her hand under his shirt for awhile, checking his face for reactions that didn't appear.. it was very awkward and adolescent, and uncomfortable to watch.. he woke up asking if Janelle was still up (probably a buzzkill for Danielle? She might have been imagining their wedding)"

'No married woman with a new baby comes between me and my man'?

"Dan showed up and teased them a bit which embarrassed Danielle, and made me think she's not aware of us, the close-ups, the caps, the sites, the blogs, the chops, etc etc etc.. Janelle came up again and the three of them ignored her knocks at the door again - really? How old are we? At this rate Janelle just might wipe the floor with Danielle before she meets Julie, especially if we're graced with a booze delivery before Thursday.. she'll probably do it when she gets out here too, as Dan casually mentioned to Danielle."

And well-earned it will be.

Feeling sorry for Danielle's sad life and her pitiful little nomance? Personally, not any more.

Janelle's going to need a miracle. I don't think these newbies speak DR.

I'm sure Danielle doesn't speak DR, because I'm quite sure the DR people are probably unhappy as hell to have Janelle on the block and were probably dropping every hint they could to get Danielle to keep their gorgeous superstar off the block. If Janelle dodges this bullet, how much you wanna bet you eventually hear hamsters b1tching about the DR saving her on the feeds and/or read us message board weenies b1tching about it? If they need the Blonde Bullsh1tter to keep their ratings up they're gonna take it in the shorts, because unless the rats p!ss away all of Endemol's profits on bribing HG, I think these hamsters will give Janelle the ax Thursday night.

Danielle's new super-not-secret group of herself, Jenn, Ashley, Wil, and sometimes Britney:

Team Tits.

(I have no idea how Wil fits into that. Maybe he has a hidden talent for bra design.)

Meanwhile, Danielle has found a new way to keep Shane from retreating during conversations: she sits on him. In response, Shane is now pretending to cut her throat, which she seems to enjoy. Consider it a sneak preview -- Malin and Frank have sworn that if either of them get HoH, Shane & Danielle go up together. Because, you know, they were part of the Get Janelle Out alliance and the newest rule on this show is that no alliance can last more than five hours, so backstabs are now mandatory and are they ever willing to comply.

I don't think this year's strategy is so much 'float' as it is 'hide'.

It's been an evening full of what's going to win Britney and Danielle a gold medal - Janelle bashing. I'm not going to enumerate the times they've gone at it, but people are betting on the intervals between the bashing; 22 seconds is the #1 estimate.

Dani is turning out to be one of my most hated HGs; she's actually giving the Maggot a run for her money. At least the Maggot had a game plan and worked the HGs to do her bidding. No one is going to be listening to Dani anytime soon.

Most of the evening has been a big snorefest; everyone avoiding Janelle trying to rally some votes. But they all have bought into Britney's lies about her and no one seems to want to help Janelle. Even Ian, whom I'm disappointed about because he's supposed to be the guy who knows this game completely. Even he believes Britney and Dani.

Thhey're starting a poker game now. Dani is passed out in the HOH, after drinking her HOH wine, then complaining about the wine that Janelle spilled, then had the gall to ask Dani for some of hers.

About half as sad as the casting, plotting, twists, and excuse-making ability of the host. (Individually, not combined. Yet.) I wouldn't look forward to a Reign Of Loud, though: it's one thing to follow the feeds and another to listen in on HoH conversations from the opposite coast.

'Twenty-four hours of Janelle bashing' pretty much does sum it all up, especially since I'm convinced some of them kept talking in their sleep. All I've got beyond that is Danielle having been promised a kiss from Shane for putting Janelle up, which she has not gotten -- and Shane telling Danielle that he's a virgin. Which may be a lie. Also that he's a dork. Which has a good chance to be true. He then went on to say that 'dork' actually means 'whale penis', so that's what she should call him from now on. I don't feel like finding out if she cooperated. (The word has been used that way, but it's much common for it to indicate male genitalia in general rather than species-specific. Fair enough -- Shane gets to be a dork either way.)

Janelle picked up Britney. Everyone else is doing it.

We also had Malin admit that he's known one of the producers for eleven years and considers him to be a mentor. Again, on the feeds, no censoring. Unbelievable.

They got a basketball hoop for the pool. Malin broke it within two minutes. Don't worry: his producer buddy will make sure he never gets the bill.

And Britney slowed down from her endless campaign of both helping Danielle find a way to give Janelle the death penalty for her sinful existence (which has to be exhausting, especially added to her relationship counseling with Shane & Danielle for a relationship that does not and likely will never exist) and repeatedly breaking her vow not to be mean and catty this year in order to deliver her part in the following:

Big Brother: "Hello houseguests, it's going to be hot out there today - don't forget your sunscreen."Britney: "Now you try to make up with us? It's too late."

So sayeth the viewership. Except for, y'know, the total lack of makeup attempts.

Janelle feels Danielle may be just a little bit insecure. Have there been any hints?

May be for Julie to say "Jury formation starts now." Wil's been looking forward to backstabbing Janelle on all his swears and promises just a little too much -- the Joshuah is coming out of him in waves of no-sweat -- and the near-endless bashing from the majority of the cage just keeps coming in part because they know there isn't going to be any payback. Tear into the nearly-departed all you like, because it's not as if she gets a vote. Until she does. It's not kind to Janelle, of course -- at this point, getting back to her daughter is probably the stronger priority, as Grodner likely lied about letting the baby come to the jury house. But wouldn't you love to see the collective expression when that bomb dropped?

Britney could make herself safe from The Wrath Of Blonde: she's getting sick of the constant attacks to the point where she's been spotting crying over it. Dan is also tired of all the bashing, and both of them want Janelle to know everyone who's talking about keeping her is lying -- but naturally, Malin's against it. Malin doesn't do dignified exits. Or dignity. Or compassion. Or honest account books. Or -- this could be a very long list, so let's stop here.

In other not-news...

...Janelle seems to be getting Frank's ego inflated to the explosion point: not so much looking for his vote as turning up the cocky until it drips off his hair. Hamsterwatch feels she's going for long-term revenge.

...Britney approached Ian for a F2 deal. He only semi-committed at best, which means it should be good for a record-breaking six minutes.

...Malin has figured out Danielle's a nurse. Which got back to Britney. Who told Danielle. Who didn't take it well. She was so upset that she took it out on -- Shane. Not to his face, of course. To his face, she just got into a wrestling match which nearly created a lower-body wardrobe malfunction while putting the status (and presence) of her panties into serious doubt. But she did start on how mean he was to her and how she just might have a boyfriend back home and this and that and she shouldn't have lifted that big weight and shown how strong she is as an athletic genius and the other thing and rehash this and that in case you missed it until Britney realized she wasn't officially a mentor any more and got the hell out of there before she murdered someone.

(She advised Danielle to back away from Shane. As if that's going to happen.)

...they had the halfway party. (Count the remaining hamsters. We're heading for double evictions, and I wouldn't be surprised by a triple.) Cakes were served with the faces of the evicted on them. Joe headbutted Willie's.

...Ashley's back problems returned: more doctor visits in the DR.

...Shane and Joe danced around the 'We're not homophobic, really' line again while discussing Wil's visible lack of athletic ability. Both tripped.

...Joe is everyone's favorite choice for the next target, which means a lot of people are expecting the next HoH competition to be cooking-themed.

...the majority of the online community seems to be backlashing on this season.

The problem is that the numbers don't add up for jury to start now. Maybe next week but not 10 jurors.

Ian does seem to have problems with thinking quick on his feet. Someone offers you F2, the only answer is yes and shake hands.

Anyone heard why Danielle wanted to hide being a nurse? I could understand lawyers, IRS agents and criminals hiding their professions but a nurse? I don't remember too many strategic discussions going: "We have to eliminate the nurse first."

Joe next? Please make it so.

I know that very few people are fans of Danielle but I think she showed some game when she decided to take the veto away from Frank. She had a trip to Maui or 5K right there for the taking but grabbed the veto instead. Not bad. It's actually what got the alliance talk started between her side and Boogie's. If Frank had the veto, they could still have backdoored Janelle but Frank and Boogie wouldn't have made any deals.

Jury of ten and America turns the tiebreaking 11th key at only one dollar per vote. The game hasn't made any sense so far: why start now?

I think Ian's playing a 'Well, I never said...' game. That can backfire in a hurry with sentient hamsters. So basically, as long as he plans around Dan, he's good.

Danielle seems to have thought being a nurse would make her appear too intelligent. Little does she know how much everything else undercut her worries.

Yep, Joe next. Frank proposed that whoever gets HoH just randomly draw a name to go against him. (Malin wants Britney as Joe's blockmate -- he's afraid of her social game. Frank was very surprised.) Joe may sense his doom in the wind -- he's been upset, apparently about people lying about what he didn't actually say. ('Trashing Danielle' is the lead suspect.) He wanted to call a house meeting over it and cut the ties to the lies. Shane and Danielle talked him out of it a couple of hours ago. He may see those stories as building the justifications to dump him. Hah! Like these hamsters need any such thing!

And Danielle may have had a neuron fire on that very basic game strategy, but you know what that does around here: start the self-destruct countdown on your alliances. Malin has said he will happily put she and Shane up as a couple. It would be his delight. His pleasure. His gift to the feedsters so we don't have to watch this @#$% nomance any more. Plus her grabbing the Veto just took a little bit of target off Frank -- not necessarily the best long-term idea.

The best long term plan would have been to boot Frank. That's why taking the veto was a good gameplay. She got swarmed into using it though. It would have taken much more confidence in herself to say "no, I want to keep the nominations the same" when Dan, Shane and Brit are all saying the new plan is better.

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