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There is a quote in Mad Men's pilot episode where Don Draper says, "What you call love was invented by guys like me to sell nylons." But if we've learned anything in these past five and a half seasons, it seems the quote should read more like "What you call [insert any emotion] was invented by guys likeme to sell [insert any product or service here]." Don Draper is the pitch master. Even when he's drunk he can close a deal (or, as in last night's episode, propose a paradigm-shifting merger between his agency and a rival's). We've seen him turn cigarettes healthy, make beans a member of the family, cars seem like sex toys, and turn a rickety slide projector into a time machine. Wherever Don goes, he's pitching something to someone. Check out Vulture's Ultimate Don Draper Pitch video here — you'll certainly be sold on something.