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What is Tantra Speed Date?

Tantra Speed Date is a fresh new take on dating that combines a relationship skills class with a Puja-style "speed date." Firstly, we help singles step into helpful relationship roles--something most of us were not taught in school. Then through fun connection exercises from various practices (such as Tantra, meditation, partner yoga, actor's improv, eye gazing, dance) you have an opportunity to practice getting to know someone in a more meaningful way.

As a result people walk away not only with matches, but with new skills, and often a new perspective on what relationships can be. Our daters say it sure beats the other options for meeting people, and our 95% match rate agrees!

Our facilitators are trained to create a safe and fun atmosphere which supports daters in stepping into their best, most authentic selves. And what better way to meet a mate? This is why we believe attendees can't stop raving about it!

Start your next relationship with your best foot forward. Choose your city for more information and upcoming event dates!

Frequently Asked Questions

Well, for starters, it's not what you saw in the movie American Pie! Tantra is thousands of years old and has become a buzzword which unfortunately has some misleading definitions. Translated from Sanskrit, it means "weaving," which we have come to understand as oneness. Bringing oneness to yourself and consciousness to what you do. The exercises involving breathing and meditation that are a part of Tantra are designed to bring you into a state of being more present. And who doesn't want to be more present in their relationships?

A Puja is an intentional ceremony. Translated from Sanskrit it means reverence, honor, an offering. It is a ritual designed to open our hearts and allow us to see the inner beauty within ourselves and all beings. It invites us into the elegant dance of masculine and feminine in a warm space of oneness and connection--what a great way to start your first date!

Participants form two circles facing each other. The men form the outside circle and the women form the inside, with each woman facing a man. Each pair then share a meaningful exchange through a directed exercise (a Puja "station"), which can be for a few seconds or a few minutes. Then they put their hands in Namaste, thank each other and--like a speed date--rotate to the next person. The ceremony ends when everyone has rotated full circle.

The exercises are non-romantic, based in basic human connection: verbal exercises, light partner yoga, dance, breathing and meditation, eye-gazing, conscious touch (holding hands, hands on heart)... things that go a bit beyond the obligatory "what do you do/where are you from." And you are always invited to participate however you choose.

What's unique is that each exercise has a kernel of positive relating skills. So you're practicing healthy relationship skills while you're having fun!

Thanks for asking! We take consent very seriously, and have a zero tolerance policy for any inappropriate behavior--which thankfully we have never needed to enforce. While the exercises are straightforward and fun, you are always 100% at choice for how you wish to participate. Just like in yoga when you find a pose you're not comfortable with, you have the option to modify, or completely opt out of any exercise. Everyone is encouraged to participate at their own comfort level, and our facilitators go over what that looks like at each event, so everyone is clear before we begin.

What makes this a "date" is that you get to choose who you enjoyed interacting with, and we'll put you in touch after the event. We like to let the women choose. The women will get to sense each man's personality and presence and decide who they may want to get to know better. Men will be instructed on how to be grounded and open-hearted so they can be felt. We find when we trust the wisdom of the feminine somehow it all works out.

Doors open at the published start time. That's when we check you in and give you your dating materials (everyone must check in to participate). You also receive a playing card for our IceBreaker game. You'll have until the ceremony begins to play the game.

20 minutes in: We begin to take folks from the waiting list (subject to capacity and gender balance.)

30 minutes in: The IceBreaker game concludes and we close the doors to begin the ceremony. Anyone that hasn't checked in before this time will not be able to participate. (See our late/cancellation policy below).

You'll want to look good, yet also be comfortable enough to stand, move, and sit cross-legged. There isn't a tremendous amount of movement; we've had folks show up after work in suits and they've managed okay, but you want to be comfortable to move. Don't worry about shoes, we'll take those off before we start.

And remember, you're going on a date. So do make sure to groom yourself and have good hygiene appropriate to interact with potential dates. *Please no strong scents as some are sensitive to that.

There is no food or drink provided at the event (unless it's a special occasion). It's a good idea to bring a bottle of water. You could bring a snack for before or after (note that some venues may not allow food). However, you will have only a short moment with each date, so you probably won't want to eat during the ceremony.

We do our best to aim for an equal gender balance at each event. So far just about every event has been sold out, and since we have an equal number of tickets per gender, we've had a near-perfect gender balance at each event. (We also use door sales to balance out gender).

Most of our events are open age range. So far it has managed to work out every time; there are always plenty of dates for everyone. On occasion we may have one or two stations with a wide age gap. But, interestingly enough, participants report that that works out too, sometimes in quite powerful ways. This is one of the reasons we refer to it as "More than Dating;" It seems that connection itself can be quite healing, sometimes especially when there isn't a romantic interest. However, if you're into numbers and absolutely must know, email us: let us know what gender and age range you want to meet and we'll give you some statistics on your event.

Not to worry! Just about every event so far has sold out, often with a waiting list. We do a great job getting the word out and therefore the event is posted in multiple places. And some forums simply get more traffic than others, so don't worry if you see less people RSVP in one place than another. We wouldn't proceed with an event if there weren't enough people to make it worthwhile for everyone.

One would imagine! We realize there are many classifications of relationship status these days. So as long as you are available to meet a romantic partner, you are welcome to attend. If your situation makes it so you are not open to meeting someone (for instance, if you're in a monogamous relationship), then it would not be appropriate for you to attend.

Indeed there is! While this current iteration of Tantra Speed Date is geared towards men-seeking-women and women-seeking-men, we do have a Queer version of the event which happens from time to time in select cities. You can check our website to see if we there are any coming up.

We want you to have a great time at our event. However, life happens, and sometimes you can't make it. If you cancel 24 hours or more before the event you can get a full refund via EventBrite. If you cancel within 24 hours of event start time (or you are late and miss the ceremony start), we can move your ticket to the next event as a one-time courtesy, provided you give us email notice. If you miss the second event, then sadly your ticket becomes forfeit. Either way, make sure to notify us via email before the event starts, as we cannot offer any refunds or transfers after the event has started.

Tickets are non-transferable. Please do not sell your ticket to someone else; it confuses the system and people don't get their proper matches. You can request a refund or be moved to the next event (see above). However, in any case, you must let us know so we can open up your spot to someone else. No notice, no refund/transfer.

Absolutely! And thanks for sharing it with your friends! However, do be sure to fill out their name and their email address on the attendee form. Otherwise we will not be able to check them in properly, and they will not receive all the wonderful matches they'll make at the event. If we had a nickel for how many times your friends email us wondering where their matches went... well, you get the picture. So please. Do your friends a solid and fill in their proper details.

The Tantra Institute's mission is to empower people to connect more consciously using the tools and teachings of (primarily) Tantra. We hold multiple events, such as our extremely popular Tantra Night! Monthly Event, and work with singles and couples to help them increase their capacity for intimacy, authenticity, and pleasure. All our events are listed on our website: http://tantrany.com/. Subscribe to be kept up to date with our latest offerings!

Aside from Tantra Speed Date, we offer many workshops to help increase connection and knowledge of Tantra. While most events are in New York City, you can see a full comprehensive list on our website: www.TantraNY.com

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Lissa & Olivier got Married

Lissa and Olivier met at our San Francisco, CA event and are now married!

Oren & Karina are Engaged!

“I am Karina, Oren’s now fiancée, from the night Oren and I met at one of your Tantra Speed Date nights. I wanted to thank you for doing the work that you do. Oren was my first “date” that night. I believe your event helped me to step out of my usual means of looking for romantic connection and helped me connect with someone that I might never have run into otherwise. The event itself was so healing on its own and the healing has just continued to unfold as the love between Oren and I grows and matures. We are now on our first trip abroad together in Poland. He proposed to me in the Tatra Mountains and I obviously said yes. Thank you so much for helping to bring this love together. Keep up the gifting of the crucial medicine that you are sharing with the world.”