Actively Pursuing Peace Whilst Perfecting Her Poker Face

How are you going to win when you ain’t right within…

Many walk through life not reflecting on their choices or their actions; however those of us who are reflective individuals are aware that who we are is a reflection of our thoughts. Inevitably what we allow to occupy our minds influences our choices and our decisions. As a new month begins, I have decided to challenge myself on a few things. My September Challenge focuses on my health, both physically and spiritually. Below are the details of my September Challenge (you can track my progress on Twitter @loveisaverb_x):

I’m a firm believer in progression, what I struggled with at twenty three shouldn’t still be my struggle at twenty eight. Therefore, I believe that we must be committed to continuing our efforts in becoming better and let’s be honest that begins with our minds –

“As a man thinketh so is he” (Proverbs 23:7, I also recommend reading the book by James Allen).

When a person decides to lose weight, before they see any outward changes it is all dependent on what they decide shall now enter their bodies. Change is difficult, but anything worth achieving does not come easily anyway, in the words of Shakespeare “know thyself”. Apply wisdom to your life choices; by not allowing your current circumstances to dictate your future. We all want to do better and the journey to progress begins by taking small steps. Learn to get in sync with your faith and not with your fears, which means guarding your mind at all costs. If you know that deep down within your soul you are currently struggling and finding it difficult to see the beauty in life, then surround yourself with people who will uplift you and not join you in your pity party. Be wise in regards to not only what you hear but also what you see, we are all aware that are eyes are the window to our souls. Ever wondered why it took you forever to get out of your funk, ask yourself what were you watching and reading? Did it feed your faith or fears?

As a twenty eight year old woman, gone are the days when I would find comfort in calling all the girls to have a night in where we sit and talk for hours about all that is wrong in life. Whilst I have fond memories of those nights, it is time for one to elevate and evolve, which means finding comfort in things that will push you further towards the light and not indulge you in your darkness. Patiently learn to find the good in your life, stop examining your life through the lenses of other people who you may consider to have made it. You are not her and you should not aspire to be. By all means be inspired by the journeys of others but I would not recommend replicating their achievements as you will begin to lose your authenticity as an individual and will become a carbon copy of somebody else.

Conceive in your heart and your mind what your aim and intention is within all the areas of your life and be determined that you will accomplish them. For example I intend to be healthier, but I do not wish to be a size 0. Therefore what will work for me (and has done so in the past) is to get healthy by no longer indulging in comfort eating but to resume clean eating, however to get the flat stomach that I desire I have to now incorporate regular gym sessions into my lifestyle. I have come to terms with the fact that there can be no progress or achievement without sacrifice. In order to not backslide into old familiar habits, we have to remain watchful and make informed decisions. By way of example, learn to say no to eating out every weekend, learn to limit your attendance at activities that you know will slowly push you back to where you were so desperately trying to leave. Trust me, learning to say No is a skill worth having.

If I’m honest, when I look back at various seasons in my life, where I was slimmer and happier (to some extent), I remember that it was so effortless because my focus was on me and me alone. What I mean by this was that I had minimal distractions, no love interests, no drama just me choosing to do the things that made me happy. I no longer wish to repeat certain cycles in life which mean that I have to make better decisions. At this point, I have to mention my good friend of over 12 years Maria, who had a frank and honest discussion with me last weekend. She helped me see that sometimes we need to consciously take a break in order to re-evaluate our decisions and ensure that we don’t repeat the mistakes of the past. I for one was protesting (yes I’m defensive, I’m working on it) that I have in fact taken many breaks in the past 5 years but when I replayed the chronological order of certain life events, I realised that the long breaks that I had thought I had embarked on were actually only pit stops. Hence why I am even more determined to embark on this September Challenge.

Mind, Body and Soul…

No time like the present!

Wish me luck and feel free to join me.

Yes life could be better but don’t forget that life is still good. – @MsTomilola

6 thoughts on “How are you going to win when you ain’t right within…”

Loved this! Love your attitude! ‘Patiently learn to find the good in your life, stop examining your life through the lenses of other people who you may consider to have made it.’ spoke to me. keep up the great writing ❤ x