A few months ago, I discovered Lani Hair on Instagram, and I was really intrigued by their beautiful photos, raving customer reviews, and pretty hair oil bottles. I began following them and was super intrigued by their products- hair oil, body oil, and face serum.

WHAT IT IS

Lani Hair is a totally natural (i.e. no chemicals or anything crappy) combination of oils designed to hydrate your hair. It is vegan, cruelty free, natural, and smells delicious. The bottles are pretty small, and this kind of disappointed me at first, but they are deceiving and actually last way longer than you’d think! I got mine a month and a half ago and still have lots left (and I have a lot of hair)!

MY EXPERIENCE

I got my first bottle of Lani Hair last month while I was in New York, and I have to say I am loving it (note: this is not a paid or sponsored post, it’s just my personal experience)! To be honest, while I loved their Instagram feed, I kind of thought that maybe all the reviews were just hype. I’d been using coconut oil on my hair for years, and I didn’t really see why Lani Hair would be any different than that. But I was intrigued, and it’s sold in Urban Outfitters in NYC (other than that you need to order online), so I picked up a bottle and gave it a try.

My hair really did feel softer after one use, no exaggeration. I felt a very noticeable difference after using it just one. I continue to use it about every second time I wash my hair (at first I was doing it every time, but my hair started to feel a bit heavy, so I added a bit of baking soda to my shampoo to clarify my hair and then went to using Lani on every second wash). My hair is feeling softer than it has in a long time!

HOW TO USE IT

I apply to my hair and roots (adding in a little scalp massage ) and leave it in overnight (it doesn’t stain my pillow at all, but you can cover your pillow with a towel if you’re worried about that). Then I shampoo it out in the morning. Easy peasy.

I haven’t tried their body oil or face serum, but I definitely plan to because if they’re anything like the hair oil, I will love them!

This post is actually a repost of an article I wrote for The Numinous a few months ago. I was so happy to have a piece published with them because I absolutely love their site, but I decided the other day that it felt wrong not to have this on my site as well. This piece so accurately describes the first few years of my journey into spirituality and personal growth, and it covers a topic that I talk about a lot, both on my blog and social media accounts.

What this article really says, in a nut shell, is that I spent the first five years of my spiritual “roadtrip” feeling like there was something deeply wrong with me that needed to be fixed. About a year ago, something happened that changed this. If you can relate to this feeling that you need to be “fixed” (as so so many of us can), I hope this article finds you, and I hope it can help you in some way, big or small, to shift towards recognizing that you are right and whole just as you are.

I’ve been trying to fix myself for as long as I can remember. That’s nothing new- most of us are used to treating ourselves like a project.

When I found spirituality and personal growth about five years ago, it did help me to let go of a lot of stress, but it also just added a new dimension of ways and reasons to fix myself. Now, I didn’t just have my body and my mind to contend with, but my soul, my life purpose, my enlightenment, and my past lives. Learning about spirituality brought on a total mix of amazement, joy, letting go, fear, and total overwhelm.

Although I benefited so much from the new ways of perceiving the world that I was learning about, it also felt like a LOT of work. I read a library’s worth of books, did all the online conferences, listened to podcasts constantly, journaled, learned healing techniques, spent a ton of money on energy healing sessions, dug into my sub conscious, meditated, and all the while wondered “when is this going to start feeling better?”

Even as a child, I was a worrier, a stresser, and an overthinker. Discovering these new personal growth tools did help in a lot of ways, but it also felt like I constantly had homework to do, and my underlying feeling was that I had to do all of this work because there was something wrong with me, and if I could just figure that out and fix it, then I could relax and be happy.

In the Fall [2014], I participated in a 10 day Vipassana (i.e. a silent retreat in which you meditate for 10+ hours per day). It was hard, and painful, and uncomfortable, and I kept wondering “do we really need to put ourselves through this is order to find peace and happiness?” Something wasn’t adding up.

Around the same time, I’d become really interested in Tantra, which uses pleasure and the physical body as a path to enlightenment. Throughout the silent retreat, I wondered if maybe a path of pleasure and joy made more sense.

During one particular meditation, we were instructed to not move for an hour. I have minor scoliosis, and my back was already really sore by this point. As I sat there, trying not too move, I was in so much pain, but I kept telling myself that if I could just get through that hour, I’d be “rewarded,” like my sub conscious crap or whatever would be released and I would be free.

Finally, the pain was too bad, and I involuntarily curled over my legs, and tears just started pouring down my face.

I thought, “What the hell am I doing? Putting myself through all of this pain because I think that there’s something so wrong with me that I need to do this in order to be better?”

That was a huge turning point for me, and I realized that it was time to stop treating myself like a problem and start simply enjoying my life.

These kind of realizations are amazing, but they are often the beginning of change rather than an immediate transformation. In the following months, I vacillated between obsessively trying to fix myself and relaxing into myself exactly as I am.

As an occasional practitioner of Kundalini yoga, I came across the White Tantric, which is a day long event filled with kriyas and meditations designed to clear the subconscious mind of blocks. It’s often said that one day of White Tantric is equal to seven years of daily practice.

Obviously my radar went off when I heard this. One day to peace and harmony? Sounds amazing. I knew the day would be challenging, both mentally and physically, but it seemed so worth the pay offs that were promised.

I found a city in which the event was being held and booked my ticket and was pretty excited for the event. I thought about how good I would feel after and how much I would probably let go of.

Then one day, about a month before the event, I was talking to my Mom about my Vipassana experience. I told her I didn’t think I’d ever do it again because I wanted to just enjoy life, not sit in silence in the hopes of fixing myself. All of a sudden I realized that I was doing the same thing with the White Tantric. On the surface, I was excited, but my underlying feeling towards the event was “I know it’ll be hard, but just get through it so you can feel better.”

Being the “spiritually-minded” person that I am, my immediate thought was “oh this is just resistance. It’s just my ego talking, so this means I definitely need to do it.”

But then another, much more loving, thought came to me: “This can end now. You don’t ever need to make yourself do something you don’t want to.” I felt like I was standing at a crossroads.

Right then and there, I cancelled my ticket and booked a one week trip to NYC. Why? Not because I thought it would advance my soul or my spiritual practice, but because I’d always wanted to go, and just the thought of it made me so happy.

I’m just done playing spiritual mind games with myself and convincing myself that doing what scares me is more important than doing what feels fun and freeing. I’m tired of treating my life like an uphill battle in the name of spiritual advancement and playing this constant scavenger hunt, looking for what’s “wrong.” I was operating under the assumption that if I can just find and fix all of my problems, I’d be happy and free. But that’s not how it works. It’s by focusing on the good and having fun right now that I’m finding true joy.

I don’t say this to bash the White Tantric, Vipassana, or any type of spiritual practice. I like Kundalini Yoga, and I might even do a White Tantric at some point.

It doesn’t really matter to me what I do so much as why I do it. I was going to the event to fix myself, and that wasn’t working for me anymore. When and if the idea of the event truly excites me and feels like a good time, I won’t hesitate to book my ticket.

It’s taken me a long time to let go of what I refer to as “my metaphysical security blanket.” The reading and meditating, and journaling, and energy healing felt endless and exhausting, but I was too scared that I’d never find happiness if I didn’t persevere with it. I’m so grateful to not feel this way anymore. I see myself falling back into these patterns sometimes, but it’s so much easier to let it go than it used to be.

Do what makes you happy. It’s cliché, but it’s cliché for a reason. We’re here on Earth to enjoy ourselves, to love and revel in our physical experience. I used to think I was here to evolve my soul and heal past karma and blocks, but I just don’t feel that way anymore. Enjoying myself and my life feels like the most spiritual thing I’ve ever done.

p.p.p.s. I wrote this post back in April, and it continues to be one of the truest things I’ve ever written. Having fun, being happy, and enjoying life, trumps everything else for me. For my most recent video in which i talk about “Spiritual Perfectionism,” you can click here.

p.p.p.p.s. (last one I promise) You are whole and amazing and worthy of everything. You don’t need to struggle or fix yourself or prove yourself. Enjoy your life, have so much fun, and shine your light.

I love exfoliating: I exfoliate my body, my face, and my feet- so basically everything, and I want to share what I consider to be the best ways to exfoliate.

Exfoliating is basically a process which removes the top layer of old skin cells, leaving you with softer, smoother, fresher skin. There are tons of expensive exfoliating products out there, but in my opinion, there is no need to spend a lot of money on it. As always, the best things are always simple.

Here’s my exfoliation run down.

Body BrushingA body brush is a brush that you use on your skin to whisk away dry skin and dead skin cells. It’s also an amazing way to get your lymphatic system pumping and gently aid in your body’s detoxification process. To use your body brush, you want to brush before you get into the shower or bath, on dry skin. Brush in large circles or sweeping strokes towards your heart; so for example, start at your ankles and work up to you knees, then knees to hips, lower belly to upper belly, wrist to elbow, etc.
You can also use the brush (gently) on your bikini line to help with any irritation or razor burn.

Homemade Body Scrubs
You can also make really great body scrubs at home to use either instead of or in addition to your body brush.

My favourites are olive oil or coconut oil mixed with salt, coffee grinds, and or sugar. Mix any combo of the above ingredients together, and apply to your skin prior to showering (I usually stand in the tub when applying it to minimize the mess). Then just rinse off in the shower- don’t worry about scrubbing the oil off- it will sink into your skin and double as a moisturizer.

Facial Brushes/Sponges
Much like a body brush, you can use a brush or a sponge to exfoliate your skin. The bristles will be softer than your body brush because the skin on your face is more delicate. I use a sponge probably use it 2-3 times per week. Just wet the sponge or brush, and gently scrub your face moving in a circular motion.

Konjac Sponge
Konjac sponges originated in Asia, and they’re actually the root of the konjac plant. The sponge has a cool squishy feel and is great if you have sensitive skin because it is a really gentle exfoliator. I actually am not sure if it’s technically considered to be an exfoliator, but it helps to unclog your pores and it leaves your face feeling smooth, so same diff. I found mine at the drug store (Quo at Shopper’s Drug Mart, if you live in Canada), but you can also find them online and at Sephora.

Homemade Facial Scrubs
You can also make really great facial scrubs at home. I like to mix white sugar with a small amount of water (not too much or it will dissolve the sugar) and rub it over my skin. Rinse it off and follow up with a nice moisturizer (I use grapeseed oil).

Pumice Stones
Lastly, we can’t forget about our feet! My friend shamed me into getting a pumice stone this summer after seeing my umm.. somewhat dry heels. I use one of the handled ones (the silver one in the photo), and I find it’s best to use it when you’re feet are damp (i.e. after your shower, dry your feet off and then scrub away). All you need is a quick scrub every couple of days to keep your heels in check.

I really do notice a difference in the feeling and texture of my skin if I skimp on my exfoliating routine! It’s minimal effort that makes a big difference.

Back in August, I posted on Instagram that I was starting Kayla Itsines’ Bikini Body Guide. If you are into the health/wellness world and are on social media, there is a pretty good chance you’ve heard of Kayla and her BBG. She is pretty much a trainer-superstar, and she has almost 4 million followers on Instagram where she shares photos of the transformations that people experience using her 12 week program, the Bikini Body Guide.

So I’d heard about Kayla and her program at least over a year ago, and I didn’t have much interest in it because I’m more of a yoga girl than a HIIT girl, but I started following her on Instagram and I got more and more curious.

Finally in August, I decided to give it a try. I had two reasons for wanting to try it: first, I wanted to get stronger, and second I wanted to look like the girls in the “after” shots (to be honest). I’ve always been on the small side and am decently fit, but I wanted to see if I could take it up a notch.

Before I go further, I’ll get right to it: I’m no longer doing the BBG. Going into it, I knew this wasn’t really a style of working out that I enjoyed, but I wanted to try it anyway, so I did.

For the first 3 weeks or so, I followed the guide deligiently (note: Kayla also has a nutrition guide, but I didn’t get that because I was happy with how I was eating). The workouts are hard!! They really are. They’re definitely do able, and for sure a big part of it is mental (we are all stronger than we think we are), but yeah they are intense, and after some of the workouts (particularly the arm workouts- damn you pushups!), I felt kind of nauseous and had to lie down haha.

I will say though, that while they are challenging, they got easier quite quickly. I noticed that I gained strength in just a few weeks (I continued to practice yoga and noticed that some postures that had been impossible for me before were now possible!).

Then I went to New York, and while I continued to do yoga, pilates, stretching, and some strength training, I started to slack on the Bikini Body Guide.

The thing is, I was never looking forward to doing them, and while I would feel kind of satisfied after I completed a work out, I even started to dread them. I’d tell myself things like, “it’s just a little over an hour total per week! Just do it, it’ll be worth it,” or “it’s just a mental thing- push through and you’ll eventually enjoy it.”

I decided that I wasn’t willing to force myself through a workout program that I wasn’t enjoying just for aesthetic reasons. I reminded myself that exercise is meant to be a fun and enjoyable way of moving your body, not something you force yourself to do to get a six pack.

So, am I saying that I think there’s something wrong with Kayla Itsines or her Bikini Body Guide? Not at all! I love the message she shares (loving your body, being strong and empowered, not over do-ing it), and I think if you are the kind of person who likes pushing themselves physically and who enjoys HIIT type workouts, then this could be an awesome route for you!

It doesn’t really matter what you do, it matters how it makes you feel. And I don’t just mean that from a purely internal perspective. Yes doing the exercise that is enjoyable for you will make you feel good, but I also truly believe that doing the right work out for your body will get you the body you want.

If you’re considering doing the BBG, maybe just ask yourself why you’re doing it? If it’s soley to change your body but you’re not excited about the actual exercise, maybe reconsider. A workout that you hate will put negative stress on your body, and negative stress will make it harder for you to lose weight. Just sayin.

Kayla Itsines’ Bikini Body Guide is no doubt a great and effective workout, and it has helped many women regain health and confidence. But it is not the only way, so just consider what is truly right for you.

Now I’m back to the way I used to work out, but I’m just doing more of it because I’m really enjoying exercise lately. In addition to walking everyday, almost every morning I wake up at 7 and then go do whatever kind of exercise I’m in the mood for that day. Favourites include,

Eating is obviously one of the best parts of travelling, and for a health lover like me, my idea of a good time is trying and discovering new and delicious healthy places to eat while I’m on vacation!

So today I’m sharing all of the delicious healthy restaurants and meals I had in New York. Consider this your (mostly) Healthy Food Guide to NYC! And in case you missed is, check out My Spiritual Guide to NYC, where I shared my favourite yoga studios, meditation classes, and spiritual hot spots

Alright, let’s talk food!

Smoothie Bars

So not sure if you’ve heard, but I’m kind of obsessed with smoothies :p SO I of course had to check out all of the smoothie places in the city that I always hear about on Instagram! The following places all have locations all over the city.

Juice Press: Yum!!! I went to this place repeatedly! Their smoothies are delish, and they have samples in the fridge section for you to try (they say limit yourself to 1, but please. I sampled everything I could get my hands on). The Almond Butter Cup is beyond.

Juice Generation: I only went here once, but their Peanut Butter Split was so good!

Liquitaria: This place tied is tied with Juice Press as my fave The Blue Velvet (I ordered it without protein powder) is amaze.

The Juice Shoppe NY: This one was probably my least favourite just because the smoothie I got had that starchy taste like they used green bananas, which is the worst! But I’m sure it’s not always like this.

Restaurants

Hu Kitchen: Omg this place is the bomb.com. It’s located on 5th Ave., just a short walk from Washington Square Park, which was one of my fave places to hang out, so I loved grabbing some food from Hu, and heading over to the park. Yum! Paleo peeps will be in heaven, but there is really something for everyone (I’m not even close to being Paleo, and I loved it). It’s cafeteria style, and then there’s a bunch of seating down and upstairs.
Try their Iced coffee and Iced tea (in the fridge section), their smoothies, and any and all of their buffet food.78 5th Ave.

Dimes: This place is cool, and it knows it (and I don’t mean that in a bad way!). I had a delicious acai bowl and an amazing iced tea latte, but really everything on the menu looked healthy, fresh, and delicious.49 Canal St., Lower East Side

Joe’s Shanghai Restaurant: I wouldn’t call this place healthy, but it is delicious! My friend took me here, and we had the best soup dumplings and fried rice and something else that I’m blanking on. There are a few locations, but we went to the one in Chinatown, which is apparently the best, and there’s usually a long wait but we managed to walk right in. Check it out!9 Pell St., Chinatown

Jivamukti Cafe: Yum, this delicious and healthy cafe is located right in the Jivamukti Yoga Studio. It’s brightly coloured, has an awesome (though busy!) atmosphere and has a huge menu full of nourishing foods- perfect for following up with after an awesome yoga class. I got the kitchari and green salad.841 Broadway, 2nd fl.

Gingersnap’s Organic: I originally went to Gingersnap’s for their Wednesday night Miracles Nights (a discussion of A Course in Miracles led by Bridget Trama), but I went back the next day to eat. I decided to get a smoothie, but they also have a menu full of delicious looking vegan and raw meals! It has such an awesome vibe, and they have a spiritual library that you can browse while you eat. This is definitely somewhere I’d be hanging out at if I lived in the city.113 W 10th St.

Whole Foods: Whole Foods is my mecca. I’ve been to one in Toronto, and it seemed more like an over priced grocery store, but the ones in the States are fabulous. And while some things seem overpriced, the majority are totally reasonable and the same or less than you’d pay in a grocery store here. I’d get meals and groceries here and go sit in a park and eat (there’s one right next to Central Park in Columbus Circle). Their quinoa sushi is amazing and their pay-per-weight buffet selection is as well (I’m running out of adjectives to describe food! Awesome, delish, amazing- you get the point, it was all good!).

Snacks and Cafes

Momofuko Milk Truffles: These are not healthy in any way shape or form, but they are unbelievably good, so they are making the list! Momofuko is a noodle bar, which I didn’t go to, but they also have a stand in Madison Square Park where they sell dessert. Birthday Cake Truffles = Sugar hangover inducing but life changing!!! There are also lots of other delicious looking food stands in the Madison Square Park Eatery!Madison Square Park Eatery

Chelsea Market: Chelsea Market is a beautiful food market in the Meatpacking District. I’m not talking farmers market, but more like lots of little cafes and mini restaurants and shops. It’s a really great atmosphere (but I bet it’s wildly busy during weekends and tourist season), and has something for everyone. It’s right next to the High Line (an old railroad track which has been converted into a beautiful park).75 9th Ave., Meatpacking District.

Chinatown: Chinatown sells every fruit you could ever dream of, which for me pretty much means it’s heaven. I actually bought Jackfruit and Durian, which I never thought I’d be able to get outside of the tropics! So cool

Durian!

Maman NYC: The prettiest cafe ever! I discovered it on my last day after an awesome Kundalini class at Golden Bridge Yoga. Delicious Iced Coffees.239 Centre St., Little Italy

Laduree: Not healthy, but totally worth it! There are a couple of locations in the city, and we went to the one in the Upper East Side. It’s a little store/cafe that sells macarons that are actually flown in from Paris daily! Does it get any fancier than that? I think not.864 Madison Ave., Upper East Side (even the address sounds super classy!)

Omg that list is longer than I thought! Turns out I ate a lot of food on my trip haha. I also got groceries (from Whole Foods and the fruit carts on the side of the street), and made most of my breakfasts and dinners at my friend’s apartment where I was staying, so now idea how I fit all of this in, but where there’s a will there’s a way am I right? :p

For Next Time

I still missed quite a few places, which I will be getting to next time, including…

ABC Carpet & Home: The most beautiful home decor store ever also has a gorgeous restaurant. I looked in while I was there but didn’t go in to eat. Next time for sure!888 Broadway