You wanted to wear something out-of-the-ordinary for Halloween because it’s an excuse to take a break from your default school look, which is somewhere between Seapunk and corpse. But the High Goddess of Planning Stuff frowned upon you and now you only have two minutes to pull a costume together. Fear not! With a little sleight of hand (and the right title), anything can become a conceptual costume.

The tourists and businesspeople you crawl past in your Superman costume from the Monroe stop to MacLean might think you are either an injured Superman OR freshman performance art. We know you’re actually just dressed up as a piece of performance art, not making “the real art” yourself. (If you try to spend All Hallow’s Eve as Sturtevant, on the other hand, your costume becomes annoying enough to re-qualify as Art).

Jessica Stockholder

This piece is a great option for a themed family costume. Someone can go as the car, someone can go as the folded sheet metal, and someone can be the ratchet clamp with the yellow LOADHUGGER TM strap. Together, you’re immediately recognizable as the aesthetic ghost that haunts any given MFA program!

Salvador Dalí Parton

I would recommend dividing your body cleanly down the middle so your face is like half toothpick mustache and half blonde bouffant.

If you do not actually wish to interrupt your strict sugar consumption schedule by preparing pad thai for yourself and your viewers, you could just get some at a restaurant. But in this case, you must inform the preparator of your noodles that they are reenacting an early relational aesthetics piece. (Does this mean that the cook is dressed up as the art handler or as the artist?)

Andrea Zittel

Start wearing a single outfit in April 2019 and don’t take it off until Halloween of that year, when your six-month uniform will at last be heavy with the twin fruits of meaning and malodor!