How I transformed from a human doing to a human being.

What if you went to bed one night; a night no different from any other. And you get up the next day. Just a normal day, nothing special. And you go about that day without expectation, going through the motions to get from point A to point B.

What if the next thing that happens is a shock to the system? Something out of the blue that shakes you out of your auto pilot state of mind?

What if this thing happens and you find yourself strangely calm. Not unreactive exactly, but not reactive as you've always been. Hmm you think, 'well, I'll deal with this later' and stay calm and proceed.

What if later in the same day you are again hit by another shock; something that has never happened to you, and you find yourself reacting in a manner that is very blasé`. Well, this time I start thinking 'hmm, there must be something to this new found calm', but of course first I have to deal with the backside of me that is now soaking wet, and cold! Nothing like a tray of cold drinks being spilled down your back to get your attention!

So, fast forward about 4 days. What if, you continue to find yourself feeling strangely calm. Too calm to even swear at the usual provocations? Hmm, 'this is odd' I think to myself. When did I ever shy away from an opportunity for the F-bomb and a lovely string of profanities to go with it? Never, I think. It is one of many pleasures in my normal day.

So, now I'm seriously wondering if something is wrong with me? I mean, come on an entire life of being type A. Of walking faster than everyone in my company, speaking quickly, acting quickly. Am I suddenly a Type B? Did my vegetarian, organic, meditating, yoga practicing ways finally catch up and turn me Type B?!

By Cracky, I think they did! And, I think I like it! I have often had no tolerance let alone understanding for a type B kind of guy. I mean c'mon, if you want to get there get going, right? Put some hustle in that step and swing those arms and get the hell moving!

Well, somehow I am finding that walking without acting like I'm on fire can actually be a pleasure. While I still like to walk quickly for exercise, I am enjoying more of a stroll the four times a day or so that I walk my little dog. I find myself being more in tune with surroundings and nature and not so busy thinking about what am I going to do when I get home, who is that weird person up ahead, should I cross the street..........ad nauseaum.

Nope, just this quiet, tranquil walk where I still wonder "who is that guy up ahead?" but not assuming he's weird or out to get me. And figuring that we'll get to our destination soon enough and I will figure out what I'm going to do later when later comes.

I also suddenly find myself relaxing into my body. This is MY body we are talking about here. The body I've had a love/hate relationship with all of my life. The body that recently became much slimmer and fitter. But now I feel OK with the whole of it in it's very flawed state. Oh trimmer, but fleshier from age and gravity. But I feel somehow more willing to be in my skin and be OK with it. To look in the mirror and not shy away; to find something lovely in my reflection even though the negative voices are threatening to crowd it out and tell me 'but if only this and if only that'. No, I stand firmly and tell those negative voices to just stay quiet and continue to appreciate the wonder of me; the uniqueness of my own flawed but beautiful self.

There is this sense now of being in the flow. You know, the right place at the right time; where you meet like minded people just doing what you do. Walking on the street, shopping at the grocery store. It's all there and I didn't have to fret or work for it, or plan some sort of attack on getting or achieving what I want.

This ability to live in the moment; to breathe in the day as it unfolds and to be OK in the moment. To experience this as second nature.

So I conclude with myself that yes, my organic, yoga practicing, meditating, vegetarian ways have indeed led me to this calmer personal interior life. And I have decided that this is just great with me! I have long prayed and meditated and ached to know the feeling of being just fine in the skin I'm in and in the world with all it's myriad uncertainties. And, I am grateful to know that this place exists and it is within me. Within my core being where I have come to trust the source of light and energy that is the true essence of my spirit.

It is from this place of new found peace, spiritual belonging and tranquility that I desire to help other's find this place inside of themselves. I hope to work with people who are feeling not so OK with their current lives. People who know they can feel better and aren't afraid to take the effort and the work it takes to find that place and bring it to life. I will draw from the the well of my experience personally and from all of my training to be the best Health Coach and Holistic Practitioner that I can possibly be.

I feel that having been in the position of craving change within and finding it to manifest that I bring a truth and wisdom to helping another do the same for themselves. Note, that the other person does the work; I merely facilitate the process and support them on their journey. It is coming full circle to experience one's own transformation and use that to help another with their own.

Now that I am in the flow, I know that I will draw the right people to me at the right time. It is so true that what we focus on, we manifest.

So, my focus is on love and light and happiness, and the greater good.

Comments

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Lisa Clark 2 years agofrom Billings, MT

Great post! Thank you! We become so empowered when we take responsibility for our "story" and our inner state. It's almost magical when we get into that flow.

Ava 2 years ago

My feeling is that it can be tough to live in modern society. And for some of us we become defensive... in a self-protection way... when dealing with anything new. Sometimes this comes across as minor aggression - when we react to the new event or circumstance. As we spend time getting to know ourselves, like ourselves, listen to ourselves - we can develop a sense of feeling safe. An internal safety. So, we don't react so much to what happens, but instead we flow with it. The things you mention - diet and lifestyle and meditation - working with these things does change us. Love changes us too - loving and being loved. Thank you for this blog post. It is lovely :-)