Personal turmoil has brought about the fall of many great men/women. One’s ability to look at themselves, while still watching the mistakes and mishaps of others without judgment, is the true sign of maturity. One’s ability to actually act in alignment with their mature thoughts leads to growth.

Enough with the cliche’s and scattered words, it’s time to get personal with my blog for a second. I’m a mess. My thoughts and heart are pure, yet the air around me is filled with distractions and decisions to be made. Now the true fight begins.

Do I really want to grow up?

My struggles with God are well documented through this blog. My pride and perspective of self image, overshadows what God has in store for me. Well, that is no longer the case. In the last few weeks, I have been greatly humbled by the movement of God in my life.

Opportunities now present themselves on a daily basis, obstacles seem to move themselves out of my way, but there is a cost to all this. The maturity to accept these changes didn’t come easy. I struggled every step of the way. I’m getting lost in my words, so let me put it to you this way.

Imagine you grew up on barren land with dreams of one day finding a fruitful garden. You struggle and fight to survive inhospitable conditions to one day find your Eden, but it isn’t what you expect. The garden is full of weeds, it hasn’t rained in days, and the fruit is decaying on the branches, how could this be paradise?

Maturity allows you to see, you have made it out of the barren land. It gives you confidence that nothing in this world can break you because you have made it through the worst of times. It gives you hope that persistence in pursuing a dream can pay off. It gives you clarity to accept nothing good comes without some bad.

Sounds good, right? Now you have fruit, even if it’s wilted fruit. You can survive……………How long can you survive without doing some hard work in that garden? That’s growth. Growth comes with a vision of how bountiful and sustaining that garden can become. That vision becomes inspiration. That inspiration becomes effort and focus. That effort and focus becomes hard, back breaking work. That back breaking work becomes the garden you always imagined it would be, maybe more than you could have ever dreamed of.

I just found my Eden and it is full of weeds, it hasn’t rained in days, and the fruit doesn’t look that appealing to me.

To write anything else would be disingenuous. Believe me, I had this whole article thought out in my head. I’d give a little of myself and then leave you with some words of advice. Not this time. This time I ask that you pray for me, nothing more. I believe the future is bright, just right now, it is so bright I can’t see past my nose.