You’re Not Alone

Like many kids, right after I graduated high school, I headed off to college. I spent two years in our local community college, honestly because I wasn’t sure what else to do. A business degree seemed wise, and truthfully, accounting made super-sense to my brain, so those are the classes I signed up for.

Two years later, I transferred to a local university. The monetary shock hit hard, but I was still under the impression that I had to have a degree. Back then, everyone I knew was convinced that a college degree was for pretty much everyone. It was wise. It was … I’m not even sure. I suppose it was viewed as the path to financial stability and success. It was the security if I didn’t get married, or my marriage failed, or my spouse died young.

It’s not that I don’t value education. I do! But sitting in that first class at my new university, I knew something was wrong. I was not in the right place. I was not taking the right class.

I didn’t belong.

This was more than just a feeling of not fitting in with the others in the class. While it’s true that I didn’t know anyone, I was a loner at that time of my life. Going to a new school where others had grown up together was not unusual for me. I knew a friend or two would come with time.

The difference in atmosphere between the older adults common to the community college and the barely-adults sitting next to me was an adjustment, but since I knew I wouldn’t ever hang out with most of them, I didn’t even mind that too much. The lack of maturity around me was merely an irritation.

No, this was more of a feeling that I was on the wrong road. I was heading to a destination that I wouldn’t like, or at least would be acceptable but not God’s plan. I couldn’t put words to it at the time, but I knew that God had something different for me than the accounting career I’d adopted as my path.

Against family wishes, I did the only thing I knew: I dropped out of college.

Now, it wasn’t quite that dramatic. I did go back to my community college and find out I had enough credits to graduate with an associates in business management–not that I knew what I was going to do with that. And my parents were not particularly happy.

Unhappy parents, uncertain future. Now what?

Earlier this month, I posted a verse on social media that really seemed to hit a nerve. It’s just a little thing, buried in the Psalms: For this God is our God forever and ever; He will be our guide even to the end.

It took me years to find out what God had for me. Literally, years. Partly because I fought Him on it. After all, the writing life is not quite as glamorous as those who love to read might think. It takes great discipline, huge amounts of alone time, and the industry as a whole moves at a pace slower than snails!

But it was, and is, His perfect plan for me, and He painstakingly guided me to it. Sometimes I was hesitant, and sometimes I downright refused to take another step forward. But He never left me alone on that path.

Where is God guiding you?

My path is not yours. Even among my friends who have books on the market by my Publisher, our paths are very different. God gives us our unique abilities and experiences for His purposes, to make a difference in the lives around us and to bring Him great glory.

Look ahead. He’s there, showing you the next step to take. And the Bible promises He’ll be there–all the way to the end.

2 Comments

Oh, Carrie, this is a wonderful post. When I was in college, I did feel like I was in the right place. When I began teaching in the public school system I felt I was in the right place–for the first five years or so. THEN, God began to nudge me. I also resisted when feelings of “this is not where I’m supposed to be” surfaced. Finally, after 9 years in the public school system AND earning a Master’s degree in education, I yielded to God calling me to be a stay-at-home mom. Even though some days are crazy, or frustrating, or days I wonder if I’m doing it right, I still have a peace about where I am serving at this season of my life. Thanks for sharing your words of wisdom.

Thanks for sharing that, Sally! It’s an encouragement to me. 🙂 I love how God gently guides and patiently waits for us. Enjoy your crazy and frustrating, but otherwise perfect stay-at-home mom life that God called you to!

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I am the author of encouraging nonfiction for military spouses and inspirational fiction. If you want to believe that God created you for more than you have or want to find freedom to fight life’s battles God’s way, then you are in the right place!