Saturday, May 05, 2018

Druncker: Marx's dreams are becoming a lively reality

Guest blog by Cohn-Bendit Mogherini-Druncker

Dear comrades, today, we're celebrating the 200th anniversary of the birth of the most important thinker in the human history, Karl Marx. I am grateful to comrade Motl for the opportunity to clarify and expand sentences from my important speech that I gave in Trier last night.

I am also grateful to our Chinese comrades who helped to resuscitate Karl Marx and who have also provided him with the bathrobe. In this way, Karl Marx could have taken the first shower in 200 years (the previous shower took place in the amniotic fluid exactly 200 years ago today).

We have to understand that our times finally realize Marx's dreams

Karl Marx who was a politically active philosopher once said or wrote, and I think that he wrote, that philosophers may interpret the world in numerous ways but what's actually important for them is to change the world. The gems that Karl Marx left for us were full of interpretations and suggestions and they managed to inspire a huge number of people and change the world.

The fact that some of Marx's would-be disciples later committed several mistakes simply cannot be blamed on Karl Marx. The European Commission will fight against all those heretics who would dare to suggest that Karl Marx himself has made a mistake. Here is one proof that Karl Marx isn't responsible for any mistakes. He wrote:

There is only one way to shorten and ease the convulsions of the old society and the bloody birth pangs of the new – revolutionary terror.

As you can see, this quote guarantees that Marx isn't responsible for any mistakes. For example, when our Soviet comrades made the mistake and demolished several statues of Stalin's, it was a mistake that Marx doesn't have any responsibility for because Marx only wanted the good things that Comrade Stalin did – revolutionary terror.

I am sure that in your living rooms, when you believe that you're not being eavesdropped, some of you say that you don't consider yourself a Marxist. But even if you're a Christian democrat, just like I am, you have to fight against injustice just like Karl Marx did. You don't have to be a Marxist: you just have to look like one, swim like one, quack like one, think like one, and act like one. Every true democrat can do it and all democrats need it. In this way, Marx's ideals are combined with the European ideals of unity in diversity. We're Christian democrats, social democrats, freedom democrats etc. but all of us think and act as Marxists. Karl Marx would be proud of us.

Capitalism is plague if it isn't enhanced by the ideas started by Marx that don't focus on the system but whose main beneficiary is the humanity – namely the working class and especially the refugees. And unless they mindlessly serve the European Union and its plan for class struggle and Islamization of Europe, the capitalists aren't human: they are the objects that spread the germs.

The European Union isn't a mistaken vision. Instead, it is an unstable structure. Why is it so unstable? I have thought about this question for years and I have finally found the answer. The European Union is so unstable because Marx's ideas about the social welfare haven't been incorporated into the very foundations of the European Union. The socialist dimension of Marx's heritage has so far only been the illegitimate child of the European integration. We have to change that and turn the illegitimate child to a legitimate one by altering the DNA of the European project and all the European people. We have to restart the revolutionary terror and make sure that the mistakes – such a those from the Gorbachev era – are no longer repeated.

Did the Hungarian reactionaries have the courage to protest the talk I just gave? Does it look like the Central and Eastern Europe, the cradle of our future communist utopia, is full of reactionaries? Can't Brussels to anything about them? Yes, we can. We can replace all these Untermenschen with Arabs who will be more compatible with the socialist ideals and who will allow the Marx's dreams to be incorporated into the heart of Europe and the heart of every citizen who is allowed to survive here.

LM: By the way, also in Trier, Czech ex-president Václav Klaus gave a competing speech, at an AfD event. Klaus is usually proud that he no longer fights wars in the past but at least yesterday, Marx became a battle of today and Klaus stood against Juncker and Marx – although Klaus and Juncker used to have good enough chemistry... Klaus said that Marx was important but the quality of some teaching is seen when the teaching is trivialized – and that happened to Marx's thoughts, too. What we have experienced (and Klaus "brags" how much time he spent in communism, surrounded by Marx everywhere) was Marxism. But Marx's star is no longer shining today.

LM: I added and improved some things but at least the core of every scandalous assertion above is included in Juncker's speech. In fact, one could argue that he really wanted to say exactly what's written above but he doesn't have balls for that. It's shocking that a person like that may be the most powerful representative of the EU as a whole.

It's crazy to say that Marx isn't responsible for any mistakes and atrocities. He has explicitly planned them and ordered them. Others were doing the dirty work in the real world – but they were just realizing the vision of the mastermind, Marx, in the same way in which tons of Germans were realizing Hitler's Mein Kampf.

The terror, hundreds of millions of murders, and the erasure of 90% of the economy, among other things, aren't any mistaken side effects of Karl Marx's teaching. They are the essence of his teaching. That's what he has wanted and he was very explicit about it. He hasn't ever had any idea that would have the potential to bring anything good to the world – or that has brought anything good to the world – and everyone who claims otherwise is either a liar or a lunatic.

Juncker is a registered Christian democrat but it's clear that deep inside, he is a hardcore Marxist. Sadly, the European Union is built out of people like him – and worse people. Federica Mogherini, the would-be European minister of foreign affairs, has been a hardcore Marxist feminist activist who has also openly collaborated with the Palestinian terrorists. Daniel Cohn-Bendit, a boss of left-wing parties in the European parliament, was Danny the Red, the most visible Marxist during the 1968 happenings in France. José-Manuel Barroso, a predecessor of Juncker's, has been the boss of an underground Maoist organization. Another predecessor, Altiero Spinelli, was arguably both an Italian communist and the father of the EU project as we know it today. The list would go on and on and on.

In 1989, we abolished communism in our country. 15 years later, we joined the European Union exactly when it was starting to turn into a very similar structure defending very similar values as the Soviet Union, a former ally whom we escaped in the late 1980s. It's sad. In our part of Europe, Juncker's presence and the speech are so scandalous that I really think that we should try to negotiate some velvet divorce within the European Union, ideally preserving the free trade, because to be half-controlled by the likes of Juncker and also Merkel etc. seems unacceptable for a robust majority in our part of Europe.

1945: end of war

On May 6th, my hometown of Pilsen was liberated by General Patton and his 2nd army. Thanks, Yankees! There are liberation festivities in Pilsen. But about 90% of Czechoslovakia was liberated by the Soviet Army. Prague was taken on May 9th, a day after the general surrender – Bohemia was the last Nazi stronghold.

But already on May 5th, which means that the anniversary is today, the Prague Uprising exploded. Czechs in Prague finally started to revolt against the German overlords – almost all the previous resistance was organized from abroad, e.g. by the government-in-exile in London.

The Battle of the Prague Radio was the key event in the Prague Uprising – and a pretty exciting one. The Czech Protectorate Radio started to broadcast in Czech only – and forbidden content was suddenly included. That caused some bureaucratic backlash and a battle involving SS members who were sent to the radio and confused by the removed plates for orientation. The Czech defenders of the radio hanged the Czechoslovak and U.S. flag from the radio's building – not enough time for the British and Soviet one. Civilians including the 4-year-old future president Václav Klaus were building lots of barricades on the streets and similar stuff was taking place.

Czechoslovak civilians (plus two British citizens and a driver of a electric streetcar who changed the trajectory to bring some extra Czech forces) defeated the Nazi forces (including some Czech collaborationist Protectorate policemen). SS members made a mistake by shooting from the basements. Well, the Czechs have used some German know-how from 1942 after Heydrich was assassinated – they poured lots of water to those basement to make the rats float. When the intelligent Germans understood what's going on, they offered surrender – but they tried to get some advantages by would-be ethical bullšiting about the soldiers' honor. Things went fine, the leaders of the Czech resistance started to self-confidently use new titles for themselves. German forces kept on trying to destroy the radio – with some bomb from a Messerschmidt, they mostly succeeded some time ago. The Czech warriors needed to defend Prague for four days.