I had to carry a tray so I could see you

Not, as the length of my absence might suggest, watching the final installment of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. No, last night I went to see a film that makes Peter Jackson’s recent efforts look about as significant as Road Trip.

The film I am talking about is Cold Mountain, the latest offering from Anthony Minghella, who is somebody I aspire to be. And it’s superb. I won’t go into unnecessary palpatations over the details, but screenplay, acting and (needless to say) cinematography are all exceptional.

It had me in tears after about twenty minutes, and I spent the rest of the film in a constant state of near-blubber. Interestingly, what set me off wasn’t Nicole Kidman going all weepy, it was Jude Law screaming as he helplessly joined a desperate crowd of soldiers killing everything around them. This depiction of the dehumanising effects of war is the film’s strongest aspect, which relentlessly persists throughout – as the film progresses all sense of the two sides of the war, any idea of “good” and “bad”, are lost in the cruelty and violence; there are just people killing people, and all death is sickening. It’s possibly the strongest anti-war film I’ve ever seen, and ought to be shown to people who think the Army’s “99.9% need not apply” adverts are cool.

Except that, when the film’s “villain” was finally killed, a man in the row behind me chuckled and said “Nice one!” and I was filled with a desire to kick his head in. So perhaps we both missed the point.