Category: advice

When I go on a date with someone for some reason I always feel the need to ask them what they’re hopes and dreams are.

I ask them and they list it out for me then return the question. I always seem to have this elaborate 5 year plan ready to go.

Save my money, buy my first home, hopefully a new car somewhere along the way. To be in a good relationship, to be happy. It really doesn’t seem like alot.

But now that I think about it I would’ve had this dream when I was 18 as well which would now be almost 5 years ago. Since I think the only thing that has come true from that is being in a relationship I decided to instead make a list of 22 things I’ve learned in the last 5 years. Enjoy.

No one is in control of your life except for you.

You can’t expect anything to change by sitting and waiting.

It is NOT a good idea to fuck up your taxes. This goes along with the fact that if you’re in college and not paying towards your loans yet-you still need to file for school.

“Not every sexual encounter should make you feel like you were taken advantage of.” It really messes with your mental health.

Never take an overnight (nights) trip by yourself.

Always say what you mean.

Be an ear, you never know when someone may need it.

Don’t talk shit. Karma is not only a bitch but she’s also pretty quick to retaliate. Sorry karma.

EVERY choice you make effects you in the long run and you never know how it’ll work out but your chances are higher if your choices are good.

Denim shirts don’t look good on me. Tucked in or out its just bad.

Your time is precious. Don’t waste it on anyone that doesn’t want it.

Decluttering is an extremely useful form of therapy.

Don’t take anything for granted because you never know when you won’t have it anymore. With that being said, if you lose it-don’t dwell. All that hurts is you.

Don’t be afraid to be yourself. You’ve spent your entire life figuring out who that is.

I know alot of people struggle with anxiety and because of that I wanted to offer some advice that works for me.

I usually feel anxiety during every day situations. Making phone calls(odd that I’m currently working in a call center type job as of Tuesday), going into larger stores or things even as simple as getting out of my car when I arrive where ever I need to be.

There are 3 things that I usually try to get through these situations and i hope 1 or all of these can help someone else that struggles with anxiety.

1. Relate to Your Surroundings.

I know that most of the reason I feel anxious is because of being in a situation that I’m not used to or comfortable with. The first thing that helps me is finding something relatable in these uncomfortable situations. This can be as complicated as a person or an object or as simple as a color or shape.

For instance, you walk into a new place and the first thing you see is a clock, if you can relate to it, focus on it. Or if someone speaks like a friend or relative, focus on them/talk to them. Look for anything that would make you more comfortable.

2. Comfort in Numbers.

The next thing that works for me is counting on my fingers. You don’t have to be obvious about this and hold your hand up and count your fingers out loud but it still makes a difference. Hold your hand at your side and tap your thumb against your other 4 fingers keeping count up to 4. I don’t know if you’ve ever used or heard the phrase “take it 10 seconds at a time” but this is basically the same thing. It keeps your mind distracted by preoccupying your hands and head and before you know it the situation will be over or you’ll feel more calm about being in that situation.

3. Mental Ipod.

Sing to yourself. Simple as that. Pick your favorite song/songs and replay them in your head. Focus on the words and the music in the background. One main part of my anxiety is being too focused on what’s causing the anxiety and this clears my head without actually clearing my head. This can also be considered a relatable coping skill.

I hope these ideas can help someone that has been reading my blogs or is a new reader.

If you feel that there is anything I missed, advice of your own or success stories if you’ve tried any of these anxiety coping skills please feel free to comment. Featured image from Quotes to Inspire