A spurned Russian woman whose boyfriend declined to take her hand in marriage responded by blowing off his penis with firecrackers, Mosnews reports.
Victim Alik D. had been shacked up with Kira V. for about two years when she began to suggest that they should tie the knot. Mr D declined, and indicated he'd rather go back to …

even harder time guaranteed for victim??

"ex-boyf"?

As far as we know, they didn't split up --- he was with her, was going to return to his family, but he may have planned to keep her as a bit on the side. And being at the IC unit, he may not have awoken yet to dump her.

Can I patent any...

Even harder?

El Reg not doing its job

Picture(s) of Kira are required.

Don't care about a pic of Alik, and you can find a blurry (or Blu-Ray) pic of him using Google® anyway.

I guess the humorous part is that the fool was stupid enough to tell Kira that after two years with her he'd be going back to his wife after all. Because it's sure not the fact that he's in ICU fighting for his life.

@Zid

I blame sanitized news

If journalists are only allowed to report stories where dangerous activities result in minor injuries then people are going to think that grenades and machine guns are harmless. Imagine what the world would be like if "The A-Team" had been in the top ten shows for five seasons.

she knew he was a scumbag when he moved in with her...

...deserting a wife and children. Those who dump someone for you tend to dump you for someone.

It sounds amusing, but it's actually appalling. If she had blown off his feet so he couldn't walk out on her, it would have been seen for the crimninal multilation it is.

@The Jase -- why do you think it would have been treated differently if a man had done this to a woman? Anatomically it would have been worse -- a woman would probably die from internal bleeding -- but I think the jokes would have been coarser and crueller.

Gives Whole New Meaning ...

I'm just curious

to know the nationality of the various commenters. Some of them seem to be lacking in the traditional British ability to extract irony and black humour from any situation, however unfortunate. Is it possible that we have a few overseas readers in our midst who, as is apparently traditional for them, have Missed The Point ?

so she wanted to hurt him that badly?

I tihnk she tried to give him a piece of her pain: like "you hurt me this much, so I'm gonna make you feel the pain too...." so she blew off his dingaling. she wanted revenge? I wonder how she's feel is someone put a load of firecrackers in her hole and lit it....then she would know its really not the same pain. I'm honestly think she should of gotten more than 12 years. and if it was a guy who did it, he would prolly get life in prison.

if a guy had done it to a woman, I'm sure no one would find it funny, it shouldn't be funny on both sides. it is a serious matter.

I suspect he'd have preferred to

Can't see the joke

Nothing quite so hilarious as a bit of near-fatal domestic violence, eh?

I agree with The Jase: had it been the other way around, this wouldn't have been considered funny. Howls of outrage - and rightly so - if a woman is viciously mutilated by her partner. If a woman does it to a man, though, that's comedy. Apparently. Well, no. It isn't funny either way; not even a little bit.

That the guy was having an affair is irrelevant. We don't know the full story; we know nothing about his circumstances. Or hers, for that matter. Either way, even a cheat doesn't deserve this kind of savagery.

Oh, and Nick L? I'm British. And I'm perfectly happy to indulge in that black humour you mentioned in situations where there's nothing else to be done, but I won't use it to excuse violence. As for irony, I see none here. Maybe I should listen to more Alanis Morissette?

Heads and Tails,

While this sorry Russian tale sounds horrific, in the words of Angus Deaton, "None of the people involved were English". This story should serve as a reassurance to the 99% of el-reg readers who can't get a date, that they're probably better off that way.

There was an English case five years ago when a girl made advances on her ex boyfriend, he declined, she tore off one of his testicles and tried to eat it... She was sentenced to two and a half years... If anyone has a girlfriend called "Amanda Monti" now would be a perfect time to leave the country, right now, don't stop to pack and do not under any circumstances tell her that she's dumped.