My husband got me a beautiful pair of diamond stud earrings for my birthday. He was especially proud of them and himself because he bought them at Tiffany. This is a big step for him because he’s usually reluctant to buy me anything other than inexpensive costume jewelry. I do know, however, that he could get the same quality for about half the price at a store I know in the city. Should I tell him this and return them, or should I keep my mouth shut?

Definitely return them. And the next time he takes you out to dinner, take three bites, throw your fork down in disgust, and drag him off to the grocery store where you can angrily point out that for a lot less money, he could have bought the ingredients and cooked himself.

I hate to perpetuate this whole ridiculous “men are simpletons” thing, where everyone just writes guys off as bumbling fools lumbering around town with their heads up their asses, thinking about nothing but football and boobies. But sometimes, I admit, they do need a gentle guiding hand and a little positive reinforcement. If he’s been shopping for your birthday gift at Family Dollar for the past few years, and he finally went to a real store and bought you some real jewelry, for the love of Christ, why on earth would you discourage him from doing that again? By pointing out that he spent too much, and went to the “wrong” store, you’re sending him a message that he made a mistake, and that he did it wrong, and you’ll probably scare the shit out of him to the point where he doesn’t try again. So if you want to spend the rest of your life wearing Made in China specials that he buys on the sidewalk, go ahead and take them back. Otherwise, say thank you, give him a great big hug and kiss, and enjoy them.