Through its current incarnation and in ones past, the Clog’s upheld its fine tradition of bagging on everyone up to and including Mother Teresa, but this Saturday’s Berkeley Project is pretty much unassailable in our eyes. Started in 2006, the Berkeley Project is a giant one-day service project dedicated to raising community awareness and bettering everything ever. Need a wall painted over, your coastal shoreline mulched, your garden beautified and your back waxed? Berkeley Project coordinators have it wrapped up, bro.

Yes, you say impatiently, but how does that directly affect us? And will the results be visible at all the next day?

Actually, not so much. Many of the projects are contracted out to community organizations that aren’t within walkable distance of campus. There’re still a few around here, though:

* A City of Berkeley Project will involve posting No-Smoking signs around the Berkeley area.

* People’s Park is the famous park right by Unit 2, which serves the community through beauty and food (NB: begging the obvious joke). Project: Volunteers will be gardening, either beautifying an existing garden or creating a new garden. If it’s refurbishing a current garden, there will be weeding and planting new plants. If it’s creating a new garden on top of a concrete area, volunteers will put in the new soil, place boulders, and do some planting.

* The Downtown Berkeley Association is dedicated to sustaining a downtown that is economically vital, culturally exciting, and personally enriching for Berkeley residents, workers, and visitors. The DBA is a non-profit membership organization that represents over 800 businesses, non-profits, financial institutions, and property owners. It’s unclear how the DBA would deploy its volunteers, but we imagine it involves buffing that one downtown phallic statue thing until it glows.

* The Prisoners Literature Project is a grassroots organization that sends free books to prisoners in the United States. The project? TBA. Quite mysterious, Watson!