Were you funnier?

You know those Facebook ‘On this Day’ posts? ⠀
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For the longest time, I couldn’t access them from my profile. ⠀
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And our minds can play funny tricks on us, right?⠀
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A few weeks ago, walking in the park with my love, I said: “I know drinking’s not good for me, and I don’t want to go back to it, but I really had fun back then. I mean, I was a lot funnier.”⠀
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“No you weren’t,” he replied flatly, ever the Realist. “Scarier, maybe, but definitely not funnier.”⠀
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I stuck my chin out defiantly and shook my head, sure that he was wrong.⠀
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Well, LO AND BEHOLD, a few days later the Facebook Gods finally granted me access to that feature. And reading it back, I swear, it’s like a 15-year-old girl wrote every line. Every day when a new notification pops up I experience yet another intensely cringe-worthy moment. ⠀
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I wasn’t funnier at all. Lost, yes. Clueless, for sure. But funnier, or more fun? Nope.⠀
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It reminded me of a brilliant line from Jenny Valentish’s book, Woman of Substances:⠀
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“I had no idea how to behave as a teenager, and I was a teenager until I was thirty-four.” ⠀
⠀Sing it, sister.⠀ ⠀

It can be SO easy to romanticise alcohol in our heads, or glamorise our drinking years. To look back with rose coloured glasses and think we had more fun back then. ⠀
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The reality is that self-worth, empowerment, and authentic confidence are a WHOLE lot more fun and sexy than boozing and hangovers ever were.⠀
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Stay here, angel. You are funnier, and so much more fun, on the sober side. Guaranteed. ❤ x⠀