Author
Topic: "So when are you going to have another tea party?" (Read 2372 times)

LadyFlyingAce

I decided to host a small tea party for myself and some of my friends. I spent days getting everything cleaned up and ready--this is the first apartment that I've decorated and was excited to show it off. I also spent money on drinks, food, chocolates, and a fresh bunch of flowers for the table.

I invited four people, all four RSVP'd, and then only one person showed up.

The first person's excuse was that she was sick and couldn't go. Well, that's fine, but I had sent out the invites two weeks before the party date, and she had my phone number. She meant to call me, but then fell asleep in her dorm room and didn't wake up until 10 pm (the party ended at 7.)

The second person had slipped, fallen, and sprained her arm the previous day (but did not call me until several hours after the party was to have ended.) She was pretty mortified that she had completely forgotten to call me and apologized.

The third person forgot about the party completely.

I guess I'm just kind of annoyed because I was really looking forward to this--the first party I ever hosted, and then no one calls to say that they aren't coming when genuine emergencies come up so that I can change plans accordingly. It was pretty embarrassing to have food for five spread out for only two people and then wait nearly an hour after the party was supposed to have started for people that we thought were going to be late but then didn't show up at all.

And now they are asking me if I'm going to host another party. Am I wrong for feeling like I've been "hostessed-out?" I really don't have much enthusiasm for doing the whole thing again, even if it means everyone wants to make up for the last time by showing up for a second party.

Maybe I could make it as potluck and then I wouldn't have to cook or have mountains of leftovers in my fridge afterwards if people don't show.

Don't automatically jump to a pot-luck. Please? I think it is so wonderful that someone's tried having a real party. One where the guests aren't required to bring something. It distresses me to think that this may have to be another instance where the dreaded pot-luck wins again.

Pot lucks are ok occasionally. But, I hate that they've become the "norm." I love going to someone's home and being a real guest for a change. (And, reciprocating for them.)

kiero

Don't automatically jump to a pot-luck. Please? I think it is so wonderful that someone's tried having a real party. One where the guests aren't required to bring something. It distresses me to think that this may have to be another instance where the dreaded pot-luck wins again.

Pot lucks are ok occasionally. But, I hate that they've become the "norm." I love going to someone's home and being a real guest for a change. (And, reciprocating for them.)

Some of us prefer to see our freinds often and bring something to make that work. Given the choice of waiting until 1 person has the time and money to host our group of friends or making one dish and seeing everyone every couple weeks - I'll tkae the later.

The kind of dinner where one person does everything is nice - once in a while. But it take so much work that it isn't soething that coan be done often. And again - I'd rather see people often than be a 'true guest' very occationally.

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weber06

I know how you feel. I've hosted one party and had similar results. I was the only person in an off campus apartment and while we were all 21, I was the only one without a dorm monitor limiting the amount of alcohol. The rule in the dorms at the time was one twelve pack per apartment whether it was 2 people or twenty. So friend "Bob" asks me to host birthday party for a guy in our group. I'm new to the group, but BF had known these people for years and so agree. We add to the mix some people who were exclusively BF's friends as well as the birthday boy's friends. Apps and beer(five cases) were hauled up five flights of stairs and only BF's friends showed. Of twenty people five came.

Bob got mad at me, BFwas late for a rendezvous at the liquor store, and canceled the party. But he never told me or BF. So we sat and waited with his friends. And it was very awkward as it had become apparent we were stood up. Birthday boy never realized we were waiting for him. he thought I had canceled the party. We didn't have to buy beer for two months. And I never hosted another party.