What does God think of “missionary dating”?

I met this guy I really like. The other day, I found out he is a _______. I know it’s probably wrong for me to see him, but I was wondering if there could be a possibility of me changing his religion. I am scared he will go to hell if I don’t. Can you help me?

—Summer

I know how exciting it can be to meet someone you really like. There’s such a special rush to that kind of original attraction.

But you’re facing the dating scene’s old double whammy. You like him and would like to date him, but you know what God wants you to do. And they aren’t the same thing.

And it doesn’t sound like I need to spend much time reminding you what God says about Christians dating non-Christians. God knows it’s a risky business, and He tells us not to do it.

You are not the same as those who do not believe. So do not join yourselves to them. Good and bad do not belong together. Light and darkness cannot share together (2 Corinthians 6:14).

If you know someone is not a Christian, you should not date him. You already understand that, but you’re concerned about this guy’s relationship with God. And I commend you for being so concerned.

But you must be careful with the temptation to want to be involved with this guy so you can lead him to Christ. Missionary dating seldom works. And God doesn’t ask you to do it, either.

So here’s what I suggest you do. First, get with one or two of your close Christian friends and begin praying for this guy. Only God can change his heart. Ask Him to do that.

Secondly, talk to your youth pastor or some other Christian adult, preferably a male, and ask him to begin witnessing to this guy. Ask him to talk to this guy about his relationship with the Lord.

And finally, continue to seek God’s will first. Don’t force a relationship with this guy. God could be saving you from a lot of heartache and pain. Or someday, this guy may become a Christian and the two of you may begin a wonderful relationship.

Only God knows. But remember, too, that God wants to give you the desires of your heart.

The thing you should want most is God’s kingdom and doing what God wants. Then all these other things you need will be given to you (Matthew 6:33).

So trust God, Summer. Be faithful to Him. And if it’s not this guy after he gives his life to Christ, I suspect God has someone even more exciting for you.