Being that I currently live in the heart of America’s Mardi Gras region, I figured I’d share with you this special celebration.

Many Americans know that Mardi Gras — on February 13th this year — is the last hurrah before entering the more austere Lenten season. And that it’s the kissing cousin of the Carnivales that are celebrated in many other parts of the world. There’s a pocket of America along the Gulf of Mexico coastline that embraces the Carnivale-season-styled rituals and traditions, and I encourage everyone to learn more about it. Many people envision the scenes on Bourbon Street, usually involving women lifting their shirts in hopes of getting some beads thrown down to them from the balconies.

Yes, Mardi Gras is full of imbibery and debauchery, but there are many aspects to Mardi Gras that are so much more elegant. Here’s a primer on some of the less-known Mardi Gras traditions.

There was no Christmas tree in our house. There were no stockings, and Santa never came down the chimney. This is how I grew up. Seven percent of Americans do not celebrate Christmas. That includes members of many religions (including some Christians) and other Americans for whom, for whatever reason, it’s just not a holiday. I grew up in a Bahai household (just like Rainn Wilson), and we didn’t observe Christmas. Or any other winter holiday, actually. Bah humbug.

Chinese and a movie is a joke among Jews, but it’s actually pretty standard for anyone who doesn’t celebrate. Everything closes on Christmas, except a few Chinese restaurants and movie theaters, so if you want to go out and do something on your day off, that’s about all there is to do. Sometimes it was TV dinners and a rental. And like the rest of you, I pretend the Star Wars Holiday Specialnever existed.

“Do you know it’s been almost ten years since this movie came out?” I asked my husband. I’d finally procured Love Actually through Redbox, in spite of trying every on-demand video service known to man and failing miserably, and now our holidays were complete. You’d think that this time of year, Netflix and Hulu and Zune would be tripping over themselves to procure the rights. But apparently not. Even a film that boasts more celebrated actors than a night at the BAFTAs apparently can’t wrangle it up–and even in spite of the fact that half of my social media friends seem to be looking for this movie and anticipating it as fervently as I am. But regardless. We watched the film last night, and I realized how it’s become a tradition in our family. Naturally, I wondered why that’s the case. And lo! This post was born.

For the uninitiated, Love Actually is a 2003 British film starring a bevy of English heavyweight actors (Liam Neeson, Alan Rickman, Emma Thompson, Hugh Grant, and Colin Firth, just to name a few). It’s a movie that follows many pairs of people, and their families, through the five weeks leading up to Christmas, and even features Martin Freeman (currently sporting furry feet as Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit movie) as a rather sweet body double for adult film scenes. While the people range from the Prime Minister himself (played by Hugh Grant) to a novelist (Colin Firth) and a graphic designer (Laura Linney), their lives at first don’t seem connected, but eventually come together. Not to mention, there’s an adorable little kid who you might now recognize as the voice of Phineas and Ferb‘s own Ferb Fletcher (and soon-to-be Jojen Reed in Game of Thrones), Thomas Sangster.

The relationships in the film; there is nothing geekier than a flowchart. Image by WCityMike, public domain via Wikipedia. Click for larger version.

Which is all to say if you haven’t seen the movie, and I can’t imagine that you haven’t, well, this will be full of spoilers. But considering this movie is ten years out now, I’d say we’re in fair territory.

So here’s a few thoughts as to why Love Actually may just be one of the best holiday films out there, and perfect for those who might be tired of the classics and prefer their holiday fare with a little more wit and authenticity.

It’s not really about Christmas. Okay, so it’s technically about Christmas. But there isn’t an overwhelming, over your head gravity about it. It would still be a good movie without the Christmas stuff, which you really can’t say for about 94% of what passes as holiday fare these days. Sure, the main message that comes across is that Christmastime is about love, honesty, and openness. The characters manage this to a variety of levels of success, from get-you-in-the-heart romance to the lingering questions left by Emma Thompson and Alan Rickman’s married couple (more on that later). Christmas is the setting; it’s got that holiday warmth, but there isn’t any sappiness to the point of eye-rolling or religious proselytization (or cute animals or horrible CGI). Plus there’s no Santa business. It’s about what people actually do on the holidays without banging you over the head with Christmas spirit.

It’s about real people. Granted, they’re fictional characters portrayed by actors. But save a cameo by Claudia Schiffer, the majority of the actors aren’t exactly runway ready, and all the characters have a real sense of authenticity about them. The wardrobe, the lighting, the camera angles–these work to bring a further sense of humanity to the actors. You feel for Natalie (played by Martine McCutcheon) because while she’s a gorgeous woman, and certainly catches the eye of Grant’s PM, she’s not classically so. People call her chubby (which is rather silly–my one gripe with the film is that the screenwriter often relies on fat jokes, to ill effect). She’s awkward and silly, she isn’t well-spoken, she has a bit of a potty mouth. She’s from the bad side of town. But you like her right off the bat. Same for Thompson’s character, who’s discovers her husband’s flirtations with a gorgeous office aid. She covers up–smothers–her fury and betrayal in front of her kids at the flip of a switch, because that’s what must be done. There is hardly any drama, it’s all kept behind her guise in order to preserve herself and her kids. Sure, this movie never won Oscars. But some of the performances are so real, they’re heartbreaking.

It doesn’t tie everything up in a pretty bow. Sure, a good chunk of the stories are ended nicely. People get together, take risks. But even in the epilogue we see that things don’t always end up perfectly. Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson are still on the rocks. There’s no sign of Laura Linney’s character who, in spite of catching the eye of Karl, the office stud, can’t separate herself from her mentally ill brother in order to have a relationship. Because, as many of us are well aware, Christmastime and the holidays can sometimes get you through tough things but there’s no guarantee of a happy ending. It’s a romantic comedy that’s aware of the tropes of the genre but doesn’t exploit them to the point of disbelief. You’re left wondering where these characters’ lives will go, and there’s a certain sense of kinship at the movie’s end, without much holiness.

It’s got Colin Firth. While I feel this is self-explanatory, I’ll break it down for you a little more. I probably don’t have to tell you that Colin Firth has a certain special place in the hearts of many a GeekMom out there. Most of us can trace it back to the BBC Pride and Prejudice series from the 90s. But clearly there’s a Firth factor in this movie, even moreso than others I’ve seen. What do I mean, exactly? Well, his is the only narrative aside from Bill Nighy’s that’s essentially cut off from the rest of the film. He’s a writer (swoon) whose girlfriend cheats on him with his brother while he’s away at the wedding of his friends (Kiera Knightly and Chiwetel Ejiofor). He only sees them at the beginning and end of the film, while he’s away for the rest of it in France. Essentially he’s got his own separate story going on that, yes, feels a bit forced at the end. Except he’s Colin Firth. And clearly the producers were well aware that so long as he was in the film, it would be a huge benefit. So, yes. That is all ye need to know.

It’s one of the geekiest gateway films out there. Sure, there tends to be a concentration of actors appearing in geeky films when you get to the UK. However, you’d be hard pressed to find a movie that includes actors from Harry Potter (Rickman, Thompson, and Bill Nighy), Pirates of the Caribbean (Knightley and Nighy), The Hobbit (Martin Freeman), Serenity (Chiwetel Eljofor), Game of Thrones/Phineas and Ferb/Dr. Who (Thomas Sangster), X-Men: First Class (January Jones), the Narnia films (Liam Neeson), Blackadder (Rowan Atkinson, Firth, and screenwriter/director Richard Curtis), and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Freeman, Rickman, and Nighy). And really, that’s just scratching the surface.

More than anything, Love Actually is a movie by people who get it. That get that the holidays are about love and loss and memories. It’s about new beginnings and it’s about endings. It’s about family and second chances, and sometimes it’s about the same old, same old. It’s love, in its many, many forms, lighting the way through the coldest season.

Welcome to the third and final part of the GeekMom gift guide for Etsy. If you’re looking to buy away from the big name chain stores this holiday season then Etsy is a treasure trove of small sellers and handmade goods. Here are some of our favorite stores selling artwork as prints, posters and more; however bear in mind that many Etsy stores sell several different kinds of goods so it’s worth checking any out that might appeal.

Look up “fort kit” on Google or Pinterest. There are more ideas than I can list here. Image: Cathe Post

It is time to breathe. Yes. It’s December. Let’s let that sink in for a minute. Holiday shopping is completely stressful with families trying to out-purchase each other, and hit the Black Friday deals and Cyber Monday deals and the continued deals throughout the month. When my oldest daughter was born almost seven years ago, my husband and I decided that we were going to start making gifts at Christmas. Now that both our kids are older (three and seven) they both get to make gifts as well. Last year I shared what the handmade gifts my family has made in previously, so now I am going to share what we made this year if you are still looking for inspiration. Continue Reading “Handmade Gift Ideas From the Post Family” »

Plenty of kids have put video games and consoles on their wish lists this year. If you’re a gamer parent, then you know what your kid can handle, but if you’re not, how do you know what’s okay? Not all games are created equal, even with the same E or T rating and it’s confusing if you don’t play them yourself. In this episode GeekMom Nicole Wakelin is joined by her husband, Russ Wakelin of The D6 Generation Podcast, who’s come up with a great way to help non-gamer parents figure out just which games will make them and their kids happy.

If you’re looking to buy away from the big name chain stores this holiday season, Etsy is a treasure trove of small sellers and handmade goods. Here are some of our favorite stores for crafts, patterns, toys and homewares in 2012! However bear in mind that many Etsy stores sell several different kinds of goods so it’s worth checking any out that might appeal. Part three of our Etsy guide will be up in a few days time featuring even more of our favorite stores.

I love fruit. I really love fruit. It’s not that I don’t like vegetables, but the list of veggies that I don’t like is fairly long. That’s one reason I turn to fruit more heavily, but keeping fresh fruit in the house often requires frequent grocery runs. Plus, one word: smoothies.

So when I recently got the chance to try out the FruitGuys, I was excited. They offer a fruit/veggie subscription service where you can receive produce right to your door on a regular basis. I had a choice among fruit, veggies, or a mix. Guess which one I chose?

The box of fresh fruit arrived via FedEx. The kids and I opened it up immediately. The fruit was safely packed in a sturdy, sectioned cardboard box, with one of the sections containing a freezable ice pack. It was completely thawed, but I imagine it was frozen when its journey began. The fruit was in great shape.

In my all-fruit box, I received organic bartlett, comice, and bosc pears; gala and liberty apples; other unlabeled pears and apples; persimmons; an avocado; and a small bunch of green grapes. I found a new home for the avocado (which was gorgeous and perfectly ripe), but the kids and I dove right into eating the others. Everything was fresh, good looking, and delicious. The pears needed a couple of days to ripen, but it’s more convenient when all of your fruit doesn’t ripen at once.

FruitGuys started as a business to deliver fresh produce to people at their office, making sure they had plenty of healthy food to snack on. They then branched out to home, school, and gift services. FruitGuys aims to deliver produce as local to your area as possible, so what you receive will depend on your location. They offer both organic and conventional produce.

Melissa Wiley has written up a bunch of subscription box services, and the FruitGuys is definitely one to add to the list. Boxes start at $26, and come in small (16 servings), medium (25 servings), and large (50 servings). You can have them sent weekly, biweekly, or every four weeks. I recommend this service to those who like quality, seasonal fruit to just show up at their door. It can be a surprise to see what you get each time, or you can check the website to see what the week’s offerings include. Regardless of what you receive, it’s all quality, delicious produce.

If you’re looking to buy away from the big name chain stores this holiday season, Etsy is a treasure trove of small sellers and handmade goods. Here are some of our favorite beauty, fashion and jewelry stores from 2012. However, bear in mind that many Etsy stores sell several different kinds of goods so it’s worth checking any out that might appeal. Part two of our Etsy guide will be up in a few days’ time featuring even more of our favorite stores.

Nerd Alert skirts have been featured all over the internet lately but they just had to be included here too. These skirts use unique fabrics to create the ultimate geeky look, from Avengers to Zelda. You can also order custom skirts; send in almost any picture and it will then be made into a custom fabric and finally into a skirt for you, great for those of us in less popular fandoms.

GeekMom Melissa loves the beauty products from Mirasol Farm. They have a lovely Sweet Orange Calendula Cream made of coconut oil, calendula, cocoa butter, shea butter, and chamomile. The unscented Naked version is also very nice. She also loves their Lemon Chamomile lotion–wonderful scent and their lip balms make terrific stocking stuffers!

A lot of geeky clothes are only found in male sizes, but Sceene Shoes offers something just for the girls. Their hand painted bras might not be on show to everyone but just imagine the looks in the communal changing room when you reveal your Ninja Turtle bra to the other shoppers!

For Jewelry, GeekMom Sarah enjoys the items offered by Comic Salvage. Sue Smith uses old comic books to create wonderful pieces for every geek in your family. From Cufflinks, to necklaces, to paperweights, there is something for everyone whether your tastes run to Rainbow Brite or The Hulk.

Grandma Thunderpants has to be one of the most oddly titled Etsy stores and it definitely sells some unusual wares. I love the necklaces, especially the BFF designs where you can give half away to a friend or partner, there are some great pairings including Hawkeye and Black Widow, and Captain America and Iron Man for Avengers slash fans. There are also some great Christmas ornaments such as a Santa hat wearing Grumpy Cat and Flying Spaghetti Monster.

You can get someone a watch at a department store, and they all look the same. Or you can shop at ORLOGIN with GeekMom Rebecca, and get a truly original and inspired piece of art to tell time.

I’ve never worn fake nails but Kawaii Deco make me want to start. The detail on the designs are amazingly intricate, my favorite set are possibly the Portal icons although it’s a close thing with Wall-E.

GeekMom Rebecca loves Madame Scodioli’s store that sells “Hand-Made Soaps, Perfumes, Whisker Wax & Lovely Curiosities for One And All.” They cater to men too which is far less common in the handmade beauty products world.

#If you’re a fan of corsets then Castle Corsetry might be your thing. They sell themed corsets to aid in your cosplay along with some plainer designs and other accessories. Their themed designs come in both long line and waist cincher styles too.

If you ever wanted to geek up your housework, Haute Mess Threads offer a way to do so. Their aprons (both half and full sizes) include nerdy patterns and full on costume designs; some even include capes.

GeekMom Kelly loves Cutebricks who turn the tiniest LEGO bricks into fun and eye-catching jewelry. At Cutebrick’s store you’ll find shiny heart and octopus necklaces, flower rings, cufflinks, and more, all fashioned out of LEGO bricks, but the dangly cascade earrings are the real charmers.

Laser cut acrylic jewellery is becoming quite commonplace these days, but the designs at Lickety Cut really make their pieces stand out. Portals, Arc Reactors and Cutie Marks are among their designs but you can also find lesser spotted designs such as Magic The Gathering mana symbols.

There was a time when point hats and capes were just for Wizards and Elves, no longer! Thanks to Etsy sellers like Blue Moonlighting you can bring a touch of the cosplay into your everyday apparel. GeekMom Sarah uses her velvet lined cape on a weekly basis and it made the perfect Winter coat at nine months pregnant!

There’s something about cute little cupcakes that seems to appeal to all of us, but mix them with geeky references and there’s double the appeal. The Bird and The Bee make adorable cupcake pendants in all kinds of themes from Disney to Doctor Who but they also make other designs such as Daenerys’ dragon eggs and the KeyBlade from Kingdom Hearts.

Dreamed Designed is a Victorian-inspired shop for goggles, bags, and jewellery that GeekMom Rebecca finds just gorgeous!

I just love the cute, large eyed character models at Wonderland Contraband. The figures are mostly designed as charm pendants and necklaces with a few other pieces available, and each stand around three to four centimetres high. I’ve been planning out the most amazing charm bracelet but I just don’t know who to choose!

Want clothing that stands out in a crowd? As geeks, we already stand out, so just embrace it with fashion too says GeekMom Rebecca! Idea 2 Lifestyle is a place to stand out because you look so freakin’ awesome. And read the designers’ statement- too cool. “Quality, hand made, originality, creativity, uniqueness are our criterion. To be featured on Vogue and design for celebrity one day is not our goal, working out timeless stylish designs to let every woman feel romantic, beautiful, cool and elegant is our dream!”

Children

My son is well past the age of wearing onesies but if he weren’t I’d love some of the designs at Linda Sumner Designs. There are geeky and more generic designs available but my favourite by far is Link from The Legend of Zelda.

Little Lady Accessory brings steampunk to the littlest ones on your gift list via mini top hats, Alice in Wonderland, rosette headbands, satin flower clips, photography props, Halloween costumes, birthday party hats, and accessories of all kinds! GeekMom Rebecca believes they’re never too young to start going on the unique path of life.

Lots of little girls love dressing up in pretty dresses, but not all of them want to be pink princesses. Enter Goody Goody Tutus who make adorable tutu dresses in all style from Rapunzel to Batman. You have no idea how much I want to wear these dresses myself.

You have acquired, built, sewn, bartered, or were given the perfect Dalek-themed advent calendar that most uniquely represents your family’s true geek essence. Now the question is, how do you fill up the 25 spaces? If you’re grunting at the idea of giving your kids daily sweets or buying them even more stuff, an activity-based advent calendar may be the perfect solution. Fill in each date with a note describing a surprise activity! It’s the perfect to get you and yours in the holiday mood, while providing the kiddos special activities to occupy those long dark boring evenings stuck inside.

Too last minute to plan 25 activities today? You don’t need to! Your kiddo is only supposed to open one door per day, meaning you only need to stay one day ahead of the game. Plan as you go and adjust the next day’s surprise activity according to the weather, your schedule, and everyone’s energy level. They’ll never know you didn’t plan the whole thing months ahead of time.

Moreover, we’re here to help you find a few perfect advent calendar activities!

3. Throw a BYOB – Bring Your Own Box – party! Invite a few friends to bring boxes and build a whole cardboard village in your living room. Win major mom points by allowing your kids to camp in their boxes for a night!

Hanukkah in a Box is a kit for the whole family. Image: Ellen Zimmerman.

Everyone could use a little help during the holiday season. Some people ask for help with donations, decorations, dinner or the aftermath. Others need help from square one. For those people, there’s Jewish Holidays in a Box, LLC.

This web-based outfit has a bunch of boxed kits that are designed to deliver Hanukkah with ease — or at least in a box. The company sent me one of its products, Hanukkah in a Box, to check out.

Now, just a little backstory, please. Growing up, my family wasn’t very religious. However, being Catholic made this time of year an exciting one. Hooray for Christmas! Once I entered high school, my father got remarried to a Jewish woman and we became a bit of a spiritual Brady Bunch. It didn’t seem to matter on a daily basis. Then, December would roll around.

Every year, we went through the motions of Hanukkah. However, I didn’t get a whole lot out of it beyond a few prayers and a ton of delicious latkes. Having something like this would have been great.

This Cyber Monday, as you cross things off your shopping list, be sure to check out the great selection of geeky shirts over at WeLoveFine.

They have everything from My Little Pony to Star Wars to Batman so there’s sure to be something for everyone. They’ve given us a code, just for GeekMom readers, that will save you 25% (some exclusions apply) on your entire order. Just enter GEEKMOMCYBER25 at checkout and your savings will appear.

Today is Valentine’s Day. It’s one of those holidays that people love to hate. People hate it because they’re single and it makes them sad, or they’re with someone and feel pressured to find the perfect gift. They hate it because they don’t know if they should buy roses, or chocolate, or something else and what if the present sends the wrong message? And if you’re married, well, then how do you commemorate the day and prove that you’re just as passionately in love as you were the day you swapped vows? Lots of people hate Valentine’s Day, but not me. I love it.

In high school I hated it because I never had a boyfriend. Perils of being a geek. I also went to an all girls school that was a bit of a drive from the all boys school. We mingled at dances and football games and the like, but during the school day we never crossed paths. But, on Valentine’s Day, one club or another always sponsored some sort of flower or chocolate fundraiser that would be delivered to the other school at lunch. I remember single roses being brought into the cafeteria, tied with little curly ribbons and notes for their recipients. I didn’t get one and it was rotten, but, like I said, perils of being a geek.

I met my husband my junior year in high school. It was pretty cool to have a boyfriend after what seemed like forever. I suppose in teen years it was forever. He was just as much of a geek as me and I have the pictures to prove it. I asked him out (remember, all girls school, you want a date then you do the asking) and had a wonderful time with my awkward-dancing geek. We discovered we both loved museums and the next day we went out again to the Boston Museum of Science. Finally, being a geek was paying off.

He made mix tapes for me of sappy love songs and I still have them, although now that I think of it, I don’t have a cassette player to listen to them anymore. He gave me my first roses and they were the best roses in the whole world. He introduced me to Dungeons and Dragons and ren faires and all sorts of wonderfully geeky stuff. Then one night he suggested we watch a movie called The Princess Bride.

I’d never heard of it. The title sounded like a sappy chick flick which wasn’t generally my thing, or his, but he insisted that if I hadn’t seen it I was missing out and that I had to watch it immediately. Despite my misgivings I agreed and we popped a bowl of popcorn and sat on the couch in my living room to watch. It turned out to be one of my all time favorite movies.

I had no idea just how popular it was, or would become over the years. I’m betting almost all of you can quote a few lines from this without even trying and that more than a few can practically recite the entire movie. It’s a wonderfully quirky and incredibly geeky film. From a mysterious, sword-wielding hero to an evil mastermind to a princess in peril, it’s a bit like a video game come to life. The princess is in another castle, but the hero will find her and save her in the end.

It’s been a long time since I first saw The Princess Bride, but it still holds a warm place in my heart and, yes, my husband does often say that one line and it still makes me melt. Tonight, we’ll be making heart-shaped pizzas with heart-shaped pepperoni and then, once the kids are in bed, we’re watching the most romantic geek movie ever. I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine’s Day, and spend it with someone who often whispers those three little words…as you wish.

My toddler loves watching shows on TV but she also has a love of books. She loves to ‘read’ her books out loud to me and I read to her everyday. Because of this, we are big fans of the Scholastic Storybook Treasures DVDs. This is because they have taken favorite children’s books and animated them. There are now two new DVDs in this series that are great for this month.

The Valentine’s Collection is a great DVD filled with stories about the holiday of love. These stories focus more on friendship, which I think is a great take on this holiday for toddlers and preschool kids. The featured book is One Zillion Valentines by Frank Modell is a sweet story of how two boys make Valentines for everyone in their neighborhood.

My daughter enjoyed both of these DVD sets, but she liked The Valentine’s Collection a little better. This is because she is only three years old and some of the stories are geared towards kids who are little older than she is. But I can see her enjoying these DVD collections for years to come. I would recommend either of these for kids who love books and great stories.

Each year my kids and I search the stores for the perfect Valentines for their classes. There are cards with every character you can think of and even little prizes like stickers, tattoos or lollipops. It’s a big decision, because it only comes around once a year and for kids, their choice of card is important. Are they a princess kid or a Lego kid? Do they like bugs or balloons or maybe it’s dinosaurs? Well, now Hallmark has upped the ante with Classroom Valentines that can be customized with pictures of your kids!

Marvel Superheroes Classroom Valentines by Hallmark

They’re themed with favorites like Star Wars, Marvel and Disney Princesses and kids can even have a special message of their choosing included on the back panel. You can also turn your little ones into everything from ladybugs to flowers to cowboys. With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, check out Hallmark.com now and order your custom Classroom Valentines.

These adorable Valentines come in sheets of 4 for $1.29 but now through February 14th when you spend $10 or more and enter the code CLASS30 at checkout you’ll save thirty percent on your order!

Brigid is up at midnight writing this week’s news because she spent the better part of the week creating a Zombies vs Gingers Christmas Village printable craft for her blog readers. She’s very tired, and certain she’ll be dreaming of gun toting gingerbread men, and glitter covered zombies tonight.

Sarah will be coming down from a sugar high after making a different kind of cookie every night this week. She will be relaxing with her husband and son this weekend, not leaving the house from Friday evening till Tuesday morning and plans on getting her fix of National Lampoon and watching the trailer for The Hobbit every hour on the hour in anticipation.

At 37 weeks pregnant Cindy is very, very, very tired but still working. Here’s hoping her little boy makes an appearance before the new year!

Nicole Wakelin is getting ready for Christmas and trying to earn a lightsaber in Star Wars: The Old Republic.

Patricia has finally shaken off the Scrooginess this year and has caught up on her holiday checklist. She is enjoying her kids’ holiday programs, preparing for a holiday open house and is finishing up wrapping gifts. Happy Holidays fellow Geek Moms and Dads!

Chaos Mandy is going to be spending the holiday weekend traveling. She, her husband and her three year old will be making the 12 hour drive up to Michigan to spend Christmas with their families.

Rebecca and her family are cleaning their house top to bottom for an upcoming party. She has taken the opportunity to also organize ALL of the photographs that were in a pile in the basement. She would like to thank herself for this wonderful Christmas present to herself. And herself says, “I’m welcome.”

Melissa (barely) survived the wave of strep that laid her children flat for the better part of a week and she is now doing frantic Christmas catch-up. Sadly, all her Glitch piggies died of neglect during the Advent of Illness 2011. However, she did find time to shop for a couple sackfuls of gift books at her favorite local indie. Getting them wrapped and sent is another matter entirely.

Kris Bordessa is helping her son figure out how to make a Jedi hood. Not a cloak. Just a hood. The specific requirements of said son and an inability to find *exactly* the right pattern is causing her just a slight headache.

I don’t mean cutting down a Christmas tree. We’ve never had a real tree in my house. And yes, we’ve had ours more than 10 years, so environmentally we’re not horrible. I originally picked up a fake one when my husband and I were first married. It was the cheapest thing I could find. Four feet tall. My mom bought us another one about five years ago that has the lights attached. We used to put up both trees every year. The little one upstairs on a table with our family ornaments, and the big one in the basement with edible treats for our holiday party. All treats we made ourselves. I’ll get to the party in a moment. So what am I cutting down? I’m only putting up one tree this year. This might be normal for everyone else, but I’m taking out a holiday tradition for us. Cutting down on what we do this season.

I can’t say this year is more overwhelming than other years. In fact, it’s less stressful. For the last four years my kids would be going crazy at the beginning of December getting ready for the Lego Robotics competition, while I would be spending weeks making our year-in-review photo and video slideshow for family and friends. Other specific years had their stresses: I only graduated from college a couple of years ago, so this used to be the time of finals and projects for school. One holiday season was dealing with the recent deaths of three close family members. Another season was dealing with my sister’s pregnancy as ‘terminal’ (my niece is just fine, btw.) And it’s only been one year since my husband finally got a good job after three years of looking and dealing with financial strain.

Maybe that’s what this year’s cutting down is about. I (THANK GOD!) don’t have external stresses this Christmas season, so why make ones for myself?

Last year our one family computer (yes, my two teenagers and I share a computer) was at capacity and could barely surf the internet. I could not make that family movie. I loved doing that project. I’ve been making a family movie every year since my daughter was born, starting with VHS. It’s the present everyone in my extended family can count on. Except for last year. The hundreds of photos and movies from 2010 are now sitting, transferred, to our shiny new computer. Along with 2011 because I’m not making one this year either.

I’m not writing Christmas cards. I’ve been doing that since before my kids were born, before I was married. As an 18-year-old in college, I wrote people Christmas cards! Who does that? Me. Except this year. No family photo, no little side comments individually thought of for each of the freakin’ ninety-two cards I sent last year.

My children are homeschooled, and I print out their daily schedule and tape it to the wall. I change up the schedule every six weeks or so, concentrating on different areas. Guess what the December typical day looks like for them? “THURSDAY: Music, Exercise, Crafts/Projects/Presents.” I’m a musician, so music practice never stops! But that’s it. My son is spending most of his days drawing “Ninja Christmas” pictures that he’s giving away. My daughter hums happily around the kitchen while making lip balm of all different flavors.

So what am I doing for the season? Yes, I’m still making and buying some presents, but nothing too elaborate. Actually, I’m creating a few photo books on Snapfish because it takes about twenty minutes or less, unlike that slideshow I used to do. But mostly I’m getting ready for my annual dessert party. That I will not cancel for two reasons: I love having a big party in my tiny house, and it makes me clean my house. Some people do Spring Cleaning, in our house December is the Big Clean in prep for our party. Every closet, drawer and cabinet is cleaned and organized. Things are thrown away! Yay! It makes me feel really good for the new year. And I have so much time this year to do that because I’m cutting down on other things.

Some people pare down the crazy holiday season because they have so many other things to stress about. It’s weird, but this year I’m reveling in the lack of crazy in my life to relax at home with a cup of tea, and a closet full of stuff to organize. OK, maybe I am crazy, but I’m not stressed about it!

Single parenting is hard. Christmas is stressful. Single parenting at Christmas time? Potentially devastating. Even when your co-parent is collaborative, friendly to you and committed to the kids, there is still a sense of loss when you aren’t able to spend Christmas with your children. The joy of seeing gleeful faces on Christmas morning or the connection to family tradition with your Christmas Eve rituals may be lost to your divorce. When you co-parent with a jerk, Christmas can be a total nightmare. It brings up some of the worst feelings: your relationship with your ex, self-doubt, fears that a happy childhood is lost for your kids, financial stress, and family conflict. So what can you do to help yourself and your kids cope? First, grab a box of tissues and hide from the kids. Some boo-hooing is in order.

1. Acknowledge your negative feelings. Ignore, for a minute, the social pressure to be cheerful during the holidays. Admit that you aren’t okay, you don’t feel jolly, and you won’t be having a merry Christmas. After your wallowing session, you can take a step back and sort through which of those feelings are exaggerated and what you can do to make things better.

2. Figure out some workarounds. Does your family traditionally open a single package on Christmas Eve? Skype it. Is there a tablet or iPod at the other parent’s house? Load favorite apps on devices for both you and your kids. Buy two copies of treasured books. You can read and play along together over the phone.

3. Invest in the creative potential of Santa’s power. Santa can do a lot, including leaving presents in the car that are waiting for your kids when you pick them up again, or tucking a hidden present into your kid’s coat pocket. Santa can leave presents when and where he wants. He’s flexible, and he can create magic in nontraditional places at nontraditional times if you’ll only let him.

4. Get your geek on. Make a DVD of your kids’ favorite photos and set it to their favorite music. Audio record yourself reading a story and put it on a CD, thumb drive, mp3 player, or your kid’s cell phone. Post a private video message on YouTube for your kids to watch whenever they want.

5. Connect with other single moms. No one else knows what it’s really like, not even your family. Not even your parents, even if they are divorced too. The family court system is different now, and you need moms who are deep in the middle of it that can genuinely understand and empathize. Make plans to be together and find strength in numbers.

6. Schedule your sadness. Give your grief some space, an opportunity to be treated as a valid feeling that is at odds with what you wish you could feel instead. Then plan a time for those feelings to be set aside so that you can seek out and embrace the joys in life as well. You may not be completely able to fit your feelings into a calendar, but reserving some time to explicitly deal with your emotional pain may help prevent that pain from taking over.

7. Do grown-up things. Make a list of benefits to having your kids gone. Rated R movies! Girls Night Out! All the foods you love that your kids hate! A nice Merlot! A clean house! Sleeping in! A six hour TNG-athon! Take care of yourself.

8. Celebrate Three Kings Day. Trying to celebrate Christmas a couple of days early or late can feel phony, and serve to highlight the difficulties of what you and your kids are going through by pretending that something as socially important as Christmas can just be shifted to another day. Three Kings Day is celebrated in many cultures throughout the world, and there is a rich body of traditions you and your kids can draw on. The twelve days of Christmas? They actually refer to the days between Christmas and Epiphany. Magic presents delivered in the night? Leave out some grass for the Kings’ horse and the Kings will leave presents just like Santa. You’ll get the benefit of shopping for gifts during those after Christmas sales, too. For most moms, this is a holiday you’ll never have to share with your ex. It can belong to you and your kids, and can be just as reliable and full of tradition as you wish your Christmas could be.

Not all of these suggestions will work for everyone. I’ve been single parenting for a long time, and my son and I have only been able to share two Christmases together in the last decade. It’s tough, for both of us. But over the years, we’ve found ways to make it work. Three Kings Day is a huge deal. We’ll stay home from work and school, wake up early to presents under the tree, and then we’re throwing a party for the other single moms and kids we know. We make, and find, our own holiday joy every year. I’ll handle my sadness privately, without letting it take over.

Merry Christmas and Happy Three Kings Day to all the single moms and their kids. We can do it!

I love all the classic holiday stuff you see on television each December. Even though I have most of my favorites on DVD there’s something special about seeing them when they’re actually being aired. It doesn’t count if you record them or stream them later. I’m talking about the random channel surfing that suddenly turns up one of your favorites, as if the network aired it just for you. I tend to obsess over the things that make me happy and one of my biggest obsessions is Christmas specials.

Back when I was a kid, in the days before you could record stuff and watch it at your leisure, when a Christmas special aired the whole school would be talking about it for days. The news travelled like wildfire, so if you hadn’t managed to see it in the TV listings or catch a commercial, by the time snacktime rolled around at least a dozen of your friends had told you what was on that night.

Then there was the interminable wait. Seven o’clock seemed to be the time of choice and I swear the minutes were actually longer on those days. I’d get in my pajamas, grab a blanket and possibly a stuffed animal and curl up in front of the TV just waiting for the little pre-special montage that notified you there was, in fact, a special about to air. Some of these shows stuck with me so much so that to this day I can recite half the lines. So, in honor of all things Christmas, here’s a list of my favorite childhood specials that still hold a place in my heart today.

There isn’t a kid who celebrates Christmas who hasn’t looked out the window and imagined seeing a faint red dot in the sky on Christmas Eve. And if you saw that little red dot in the sky, the image that came to mind was likely of Rudolph as he was in the Rankin/Bass stop motion animation special that first aired way back in 1964. But more than the story of Rudolph and how the other reindeer were mean until he saved the day, this special introduced us to the Island of Misfit Toys. In fact, it’s all the other characters from this one that make me love it. An abominable snowman named Bumble, a prospector named Ukon Corneilus and little Hermey, the elf that just wants to be a dentist. The supporting cast nearly out shines the lead’s nose.

Every single year I built a snowman. Every. Single. Year. And that darn thing never came to life no matter how many different kinds of hats and scarves I gave him. But, it was okay, because I still had my Frosty movie to keep my hopes alive and show me what might happen if I persevered and kept building happy little snowmen across my lawn. Since 1969, the Rankin/Bass animated version of this classic has been keeping kids hopes alive and bringing them to tears. Come on, who didn’t cry when that stupid Profesor Hinkle trapped poor Frosty in that greenhouse? I hate that guy.

Another stop-motion animation classic from Rankin/Bass that debuted in 1970, this one shows us how Santa got his start as a little orphan baby taken in my elves. I mean, how cool is that? Can you imagine growing up with elves? Meanwhile, Mayor Burgermeister Meisterburger is making the children in the town of Sombertown miserable by outlawing toys. Yeah, he’s one evil dude but he does have the best villain name in the history of forever. I always imagine the creators of this one were super hungry when they came up with that one. Despite the coolness of his name, the Mayor fails and eventually good ole Santa Claus delivers toys to the children of Sombertown and a legend is born.

This 1974 movie has my all-time favorite songs sung by my all-time favorite stop motion animation characters. Heat Miser and Snow Miser perform the best sing and dance-off in history to determine who’s the better brother. The rest of this movie centers around trying to save Christmas when Santa is a bit under the weather, but these guys steal the show. Their crazy hair, mini-me minions, and ragtime dance sequence make them the most memorable stop motion characters ever. Ever. I love those guys.

Although it didn’t make it’s debut until 1983, this has become the grandaddy of all Christmas movies. It doesn’t matter that it’s set way back in the late 30′s, this movie captures the essence of being a kid in any era. From the iconic leg lamp (the ornament is on my tree) to the bullies, the triple-dog dare to the ridiculous bunny outfit, every single one of us can relate to little Ralphie. You may never have longed for a Red Ryder BB Gun, but we all had an “it” toy that we were dying to see on Christmas morning. And really, how can you not like a movie where a kid gets his tongue stuck to a flagpole on a dare?

That’s my list. These are the movies that I watch every year and sing along with like I’m a seven-year-old up past her bedtime. There are so many good ones out there, though, that I’m sure there are a few that didn’t make my list that are tops on yours. Tell me, what did I miss?

I love the holiday season, especially now that my daughter is old enough to start to understand what is going on with the holidays. We celebrate Christmas, but I’d like her to know that there are other holidays that people celebrate during this time of year. The Night Before Christmas DVD set from Scholastic Storybook Treasures has been very helpful when it comes to being able to show my daughter some of the different holidays celebrated during this season as well as how different cultures celebrate.

Like other Scholastic Storybook Treasures DVDs, The Night Before Christmas has several stories per DVD that are animated and narrated. There are classics like The Night Before Christmas and The Little Drummer Boy. There is also a Hanukkah story, In the Month of Kislev, as well as a Kwanzaa story, Seven Candles for Kwanzaa. There is even a story about Chinese New Year called Sam and the Lucky Money.

My 3-year-old liked all of the stories, but she enjoyed the ones that had to do with Santa most of all. I think these DVDs will become holiday favorites, especially as she gets a little old enough to appreciate some of the other holidays and traditions that people celebrate during this time of year. I would recommend this DVD set to anyone who has young children and wants a great set of diverse stories for the holidays.