Who We Are

Michael Marino holds a Ph.D. from Tufts University in Holistic Burgiatry, with a concentration in Condiments. He is the author of the highly regarded “Achieving Complete Peace and Wellness, One Burger at a Time.” Dr. Marino, who chairs the Burgendental Meditation department at Wake Forest University, is currently on sabbatical in Hackensack, New Jersey, where he is writing a treatise on the dangers of veggie burger addiction.

Scott Blumenthal is a leading British burgrarian, having spent eight years as a research fellow at Cheltenham & Gloucester College of Meat Pies. He is the author of the “The Demise of Henry VIII: Conspiracy, Treason, and One Too Many Patty Melts.” Blumenthal is currently teaching several doctoral-level courses at Duke University, including Colonialism, Imperialism, and Transnationalism in the Era Before Ketchup, which explores the relationship between dry hamburgers and the demise of the Spanish Armada.

Reverend Donald Corey is a universally renowned burgiatric orator. After developing a 12-step program for overcoming addiction to applewood smoked bacon, he received his master’s degree in burgiatry from Fairfield Union University College. His critically acclaimed sermons can often be found on bootleg Phish CDs. Known for his fiery delivery and fervid, spontaneous burger-themed speeches, Reverend Don often serves as the keynote speaker at the VFW’s Turkey Shoot and Spit fundraisers.

Burgiatrists Emeritus:

John McManus is a distinguished burgiatrist and renowned author of “Self-Actualization, Medium-Rare,” which convinced the world to accept an additional level to Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Dr. McManus holds an advanced degree in burgiatry from Universität Müenster in Hamburg, Germany. Also widely known as the creator of the ketchup blot test for diagnosing severe ground beef addiction, and for his many published collections of hamburger poetry, including, “Hold Me, There’s a Slight Grill in the Air.”

Chad Ward bypassed traditional burgiatric academia and earned his grill marks in the unlicensed burger pits of Hong Kong and Malaysia, competing under various aliases and stage names, including Patty O’Doom, Baron Beefcake, The Griddler, and, once, embarrassingly, Major Meat. He made the transition to “legitimate” hamburger studies with the publication of his treatise on the physiology of taste and the chemical reactions that occur during hamburger browning, Maillard and Me, though he maintains a network of burger underworld contacts.