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The Trek Nation - Bliss

Bliss

Janeway: A wormhole?Chakotay: Yes. It leads straight home and it's perfectly safe.Janeway: How can you tell?Tuvok: From those flashing neon signs around the opening.Janeway: (reading from viewscreen) THIS WAY HOME. SAFE ROUTE GUARANTEED. Gosh, that's convenient.

Naomi: Can I try piloting the Delta Flyer?Seven: Inadvisable. It would be too dangerous.Paris: As compared to Chakotay's flying, you mean?Seven: Set a course for Voyager, Miss Wildman.

Janeway: (grinning) We've found a wormhole.Chakotay: (grinning) It leads straight home.Kim: (grinning) All the sensor readings for it are just peachy.Seven: (frowning) Something's not right here.Janeway: (grinning) You're spoiling the mood, Seven.

Chakotay: Great news! Here are more letters from home for us!Janeway: (reads) Wow! Happyhappyhappy!Chakotay: (reads) Me too! Me too!Janeway: Mark's new fiancée has taken a hike! I don't need to ogle you anymore!Chakotay: And I'll be doing less jail time than I expected! Just ten years!

Seven: Have you noticed the crew acting strangely since we returned?Paris: (grinning) In what way?Seven: Never mind.

Qatai: (over the Astrometrics viewscreen) Your crew is being brainwashed!Seven: No kidding. What do you recommend?Qatai: Stay away or your ship will be devoured by the evil beast!Seven: Didn't you deliberately allow your own ship to be swallowed?Qatai: Do as I say, young lady, not as I do!

Seven: I need access to Astrometrics.Tuvok: We've shut it down.Seven: Then I must speak to the Doctor.Paris: We've shut him down too.Seven: Am I picking up a pattern here?Chakotay: Yup. Can you guess what comes next?

Chakotay: Captain, Seven's put up a Borg forcefield and is about to beam herself to Engineering with a phaser rifle.Janeway: (over the comm) I'm sure you can deal with the situation.Chakotay: Naomi Wildman is helping her.Janeway: Uh-oh.

Seven: I propose that we cooperate to escape the monster.Qatai: (over the viewscreen) You're an illusion trying to deceive me! I refuse to listen to you! I'll, um, just look at you, that's all.Seven: In that case, I am ending this transmission.Qatai: Er...wait, I've changed my mind.

Doctor: Please state the nature of the medical emergency.Seven: The crew is unconscious and a giant mind-controlling space monster is digesting the ship.Doctor: Am I always the last person to be told anything around here?

Naomi: If we make ourselves taste bad, maybe the monster will spit us out.Doctor: Agreed -- but how do we do this?Seven: (working console) I am jettisoning the contents of Cargo Bay One.Qatai: What's in Cargo Bay One?Seven: Twelve tons of leola root.Giant Space Monster: Yuck! Burp! Ptoooie!

Captain's Log: Thanks to Seven, Doc and the kid, we're now safe and sound and all feeling like complete idiots.

Naomi: Think we'll ever reach Earth?Seven: Unfortunately, yes.Naomi: That's what I was afraid of.
(Qatai heads back for the monster at Incredulous Speed)