Oh gosh I hate these things with a passion. I'm always at a complete loss of what to say, then I end up cluttering it with incomplete and entirely random thoughts. I'm going to try now, and you can tune out whenever you see fit.

ABOUT ME:

My name is Gwendolynne, but I'd prefer you either call me Gwen or LittleMissDementorsKiss. I'm Diabetic. If I type and post something that has totally crappy grammar/spelling, please just assume that my sugar was high. If something makes you think I was on an acid trip when I wrote it, or if it ends up going on tangents, it was probably written on a low (there are only two things a diabetic can't eat: poison, and cookies... made with poison. ) I am Roman Catholic and proud. For those who have read Scott Westerfeld's So Yesterday, I am currently involved in SHIFT. For those who have not read Scott Westerfeld's So Yesterday, I am currently invovled in SHIFT. I write in a combination of American spelling and 'the rest of the English speaking world AKA correct' spelling. Yoghurt always has an H. Pyjamas sometimes has a Y. Most 'U is optional' words are spelled with the U (Colour, flavour, humour, favourite, behaviour) Chips can either mean crisps or fries, depending on my mood. Biscuits aren't cookies, they're 'biscuits and gravy' biscuits.Don't hate, appreciate!

MUSIC:

I am a complete Harrry Potter Nerd. I love love LOVE WRock. My iPod holds a ton of it. My sister says it's a waste of money; I say it's art.I have a bit of everything on my iPod. Yes, I'm a contradicting soul, going from the Newsboys' He Reigns to Green Day's Horseshoes and Hand Grenades to Josh Groban's So She Dances in a row without pauses and thinking nothing of it. My friend's hate it when I play Hocus Pocus by Focus, but c'mon--even the name is epic. So what if it's got a bit of yodeling. I love most 90s punk, especially Cute Is What We Aim For.I am an un-fan of anything Hannah Montana/ Miley Cyrus (How is it that someone with two personalities doesn't even have one?), Jonas Brothers, or Justin Beiber (who stole the Cartigans' Lovefool, by the way vs. )

BOOKS

I am a big reader. I love Harry Potter (which, though already established, I felt was in need of reiteration), The Mortal Instruments Series, The Forest of Hands and Teeth, the Hunger Games, and a whole bunch of other books and series that I may list later, but don't feel like typing at the moment. I generally like Vivian Vande Velde and Michael Crichton(A nut by any other name would smell like feet). I'm basically a big Sci-fi and Fantasy fan, and pretty much love anything post-apocolyptic. I absolutely DESPISE Twilight. If you like it, don't discuss it with me unless you are ready for a HUGE rant about all of the various discrepancies and overall stupidities of the series. I don't particularly like James Patterson because James Patterson writes like a tweenager with Korsakoff's and a supiriority complex and then is praised for it.

MOVIES:

This is one of the few categories in which you will not hear me SQUEEEE about Harry Potter. I enjoy most of the movies, but I am not fond enough of them to SQUEEEE about them. I love Monty Python and the Holy Grail, PotC, and Disney's version of The Sword and the Stone. I liked Season of the Witch, The Last Mimzy, and several others that for some reason are connected to these two in my mind. I also like several Made-for-TV movies, specifically The Librarian series. Also, Batman: The Movie.

TELEVISION:

I like Merlin, Criminal Minds (mostly because of Reid), Lie to Me, Supernatural, and Glee (though I'd love to point out that I am NOT a Gleek, but rather a very versitile starkid) I also have a cruel tendancy to fall in like with shows that are cancelled before they ran dry, like The Listener, Ask Rhod Gilbert, The Middleman, Moonlight, Crusoe, Firefly, Kyle XY, The IT Crowd, and Mental. The middleman was my favorite out of all of those, and if I had to chose only one to bring back that would be it. But then again... The Listener had a horrible horrible horrible "last" episode, only because they were planning on another season so they left it as the cliffhanger of the friggin' century. Grrrrrrr! WHAT HAPPENED TO TOBY'S MOM!!!I'm positively obbsessed with Doctor Who. Can someone PLEASE review Dress and Tie (See below) I don't like Rose, though. I actually don't like most of the companions, but I really, really don't like Rose. Martha was OK. Amy is sometimes awesome and sometimes annoying.. Donna is great. Catherine Tate is epic, though, so that tilts the scales in Donna's favor. I don't really actually ship Doctor Who at all. In fanfiction I write Amy/11 because if the Doctor got together with any of his companions I think it should be her. However, if that actually did happen I'd be annoyed. Again, I hate Rose. A lot. Very very very much.In addition to Doctor Who, I enjoy a lot of other British TV shows. I like The Hour and Bedlam (which I watch on BBC America) and many panel shows like Never Mind the Buzzcocks, Would I Lie to You, and Big Fat Quiz of the Year (which are not availible on BBC America)

SONGFICS:

I have written a few songfics and inspired-by-song-fics. Here are the links to youtube videos of these songs. I try to find lyric videos.

Hermione's destiny is altered by the Powers that Be. She is cast back to the Marauder's Era where she is Hermione Potter, the pureblood fraternal twin sister of James Potter. She retains Hermione Granger's memories, and is determined to change her brother's fate for the better. Obviously AU. Starts in their 1st year. M for language, minor violence, etc.

Percy's ambition leads him places he would rather not have gone. This is the broadest sort of crack!fic, and doubtless has content that will offend nearly everyone at some point or another. Foul language, unlikely scenarios, various stereotypes, name it, it's likely in here somewhere. However, people have actually expelled beverages through their noses reading this. Fair warning.

Everyone thinks that they're doing it wrong. But Everyone is an idiot. Everyone could go hide under a rock and die for all she cares, because she knows that she and Remus are better than Everyone's tests. Inspired by the song Safe Ride by CIWWAF. M for naughty words, not for naughty hugs.

When Hatter followed Alice through the looking glass, he knew he'd be facing a different world with a different culture and enviroment. But he didn't imagine that it'd be this manxome for him to adapt. Contains jabberwocky references, but they're explained. It's a oneshot, but with positive feedback I might add more. Enjoy!

When OC Maya Clyde meets Scorpius Malfoy, she instantly fell in hate with him. When they're chosen to be head girl and boy and she misses a meeting with the headmaster, Malfoy decides to use any means to acheive his ends

Lily and Hermione have some quality Aunt/Niece time until a secret is exposed and things take a turn for the serious. Hermione shares a story from her school days to try and save Lily from heartbreak. Next Generation, Mostly Canon, frame story.

I was never a huge fan of Simone, so I decided to do this instead. When Claire OC is sent to help Flynn in Verkhoyansk, there's some animosity. What happenes when that same animosity decides between life or death?

Random thought that popped into my head after the pregnancy scare in series six. Amy/11 of course. Amy tries to find an acceptable way to put baby Sophia to sleep. I used this instead of a lame attempt at a songfic for a song you'll see if you read on.R&R

Merlin's sister Alaïs has served princesses Ela and Dettie for over ten years. When their kingdom is burned, the three are the only survivors. After making their way to Camelot, she must hide the cherrished gifts she and Merlin share for the first time.