The Music Geek Track of the Week: “Bohemian Rhapsody” as performed by William Shatner

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There is only so much I can write before you realize this is a 7-minute video of William Shatner covering “Bohemian Rhapsody” and either decide to fasten your eyes to your laptop or recoil at the thought of Captain Kirk’s apparition performing Queen in spoken word.

So I guess there isn’t really a point to dissecting the actual emotion or force of the song, because quite frankly, how in the hell would anyone be able to do that with a straight face? Instead I will guide you through my own emotional arc as I watched:

Disbelief/Shock that this is a thing that exists in our world. “Is this the real life?” For the first minute and a half, I could not have told you.

Guilt that I may not be able to sit through the entirety of this experience. How am I supposed to sit idly and let Shatner replace Freddie Mercury’s unearthly vocal range with his salty monotone?

And just when I am about to X out the clip, I achieve Acceptance that I am already halfway through the video and have caught myself singing (speaking) along.

And finally Enjoyment/Relief. I did it! I got through the entire 7 minutes, and have an overwhelming sense of accomplishment. After I overcame the feeling that an autistic Freddie Mercury impersonator was trying to lull me to sleep, I found myself smiling and sharing the link with friends.

Having written these steps as I watched the video, I am really amused at how closely they resemble the 7 steps of the grieving process. I wonder what the exact psychological implications are? Who knows, but I think I should have headlined this post “Swag Swag Like Shatner,” at least for consistency’s sake.

All I can think about is Ben Folds talking about how Shatner was at his best when he just played it straight and didn’t play up his own satire of himself… I believe this is a little closer to the latter than “Has Been” was. Although to be fair it’s a difficult track to perform without sending yourself up.