It thundered: "Most people would think all a fertility clinic needs these days is an internet connection, but clearly this one thinks giving a sample should be a five-star, hi-tech experience. This money could have been spent on treatment rather than on trying to improve on methods that have always worked just fine."

In fact, the Taxpayers' Alliance doesn't realise it's not even necessary to go to the expense of computer-driven stimulation, when good, old-fashioned paper will do the trick just as well.

The Sun notes that other fertility centres "provide a similar service by spending less than £100 a year on magazines to stimulate patients". The cost of stiffening donors to Royal Cornwall Hospitals NHS Trust is just a fiver a year. IVF Wales "relies on donations", while Southampton University Hospital NHS Trust gets its jazz mags free from the publisher. ®