Roosh’s Return of Kings blog: Tamerlan Tsarnaev had an American wife, therefore American women want to be beaten

Leave it to Roosh V’s Return of Kings blog to publish the most reprehensible thing I’ve yet seen related to the Boston Marathon bombing.

In a post with the lovely title “The American Woman Has Hit An All-Time Low,” guest blogger Samseau offers some thoughts – that is to say, wild, unsupported speculation – about the widow of bombing suspect Tamerlan Tsarnaev, and uses that as evidence in a case against American women as a whole, declaring her “a profound marker in the decline of the American woman.”

Samseau bases much of his, er, theorizing on the facts that Tsarnaev was a Muslim immigrant while his widow, Katherine Tsarnaev, nee Russell, was “common American female stock.”

According to most accounts, the two met in a nightclub, and Samseau – his head filled with PUA fever dreams — imagines the scenario:

Although it is unclear how he seduced her, my guess is that he got her with some Muslim game: intimidating gazes, ramrod straight stances, bottle service, congregating with all of the other jacked immigrants in the nightclub with their top two shirt buttons undone, and then inviting girls back to his table to talk.

Most likely they both frequented the same nightclubs when he noticed her, and made a few attempts to get her back to his place before he went for the close. Given that she was an American woman, she put out right away as she did for so many other men in her freshman and sophmore years.

Wouldn’t you hit it? I know I would.

Samseau is somehow able to conjure all this up from the one widely reported fact that the two met in a nightclub.

But it’s what he manages to conjure up from the reports that Tamerlan Tsarnaev physically abused his wife that really takes Samseau’s post over the top. (TRIGGER WARNING in what follows for Samseau’s strange apologia for domestic violence against women.)

Noting that Tsarnaev was arrested for domestic violence against another girlfriend around the time Katherine Russell started dating him, Samseau concludes that “Katherine knew this guy was a piece of shit from the get-go, but most likely willfully ignored it in favor of her lusts.”

Oh, but Samseau is just getting started. He then posits that because

Katherine was a young American woman, she most likely did not see Tsarnaev, or any man she was banging, as anything beyond fun. But because Tsarnaev was a violent man, using force, coercion, and beatings to keep her from straying. Any hint of infidelity resulted in some kind of punishment for Katherine.

Samseau, while registering polite disdain towards Tsarnaev’s alleged violence towards his wife, also seems to regard it as something of a necessity:

I am not surprised that it took the violence of Tsarnaev’s level to keep a young and beautiful girlfriend in Boston. I know that hookup culture well, and girls actively dump and cheat on men whenever they so please. Men are more likely to be pump and dumped than the women are.

Yes, that’s right, he’s arguing that the only way to keep young and beautiful American women from cheating is to beat them. Adding insult to injury — quite literally — Samseau goes on to argue that this is how American women secretly like it.

Thus we reach the disturbing conclusion of this story – Katherine was not a victim, she was not a special case, she was an ordinary American woman who represented her culture in every way, and that is precisely why she betrayed it. She was given everything a woman could want in life, and instead she choose to find something, someone – anyone – who could take it away from her. Unsatisfied with her life of being catered on beck and call, of whim and notion, she was drawn to the first man who would remove it all and place chains around her – even if that man hated the country who raised her. …

And since Katherine was nothing more than an “All-American girl,” it is reasonable to conclude that most American women are exactly like Katherine – unhappy with their spoiled lives who would gladly give it up just for a chance to be enthralled by a powerful man. The women of this country have no more loyalty to the land that raised them, but instead are opportunists looking for a chance to submit in pleasure.

Samseau follows this appalling victim-blaming bullshit with a version of the standard-issue Nice Guy ™ Lament:

Until that opportunity comes, they will hate on all men who try to be anything good towards them, and act out against them – by denying them sex and relationships, by throwing them in jail with trumped up charges, by stealing their money under the pretense of marriage – until they are forced to stop. And it doesn’t take much to stop them – even a welfare bum like Tsarnaev could do it.

Oh, but Samseau isn’t exactly recommending that American men beat their girlfriends – because this would be bad for them. For the men, that is.

Now, I do not think any man should go around beating women just so he can keep them. This is obviously a shitty, destructive way to live that will only cause you more pain and unhappiness in the long run. Any woman that requires beatdowns in order to remain faithful is a garbage woman who will never make you happy. And yet with the extreme shortage of eligible American women, what is a good American man supposed to do?

Samseau ends his post with a suggestion that American men leave the country to some foreign paradise where women aren’t so, well, American. Which is, I suppose, a better alternative than advising men to stick around and beat up women. Be thankful for small mercies, I guess.

I would have received full aid if I accepted the loans as well, but my father is religiously opposed to interest, so I would get into heaps of trouble. He gets fucking furious when he finds out about any family member getting interest-based loans.

Hey, so obviously student debt is a very serious thing, but if you don’t yourself have major objections to it, it seems like this could be an opportunity to get out from under your dad’s thumb. He’s going to eventually end up mad at you when you transition anyway, right? I know you want to maintain a relationship with him, but there’s just going to be a fallout there, one way or another. But if you accept the full aid, he wouldn’t have to pay for any of your education and he would have no leverage to control things like where you live while you attend.

He’s going to eventually end up mad at you when you transition anyway, right? I know you want to maintain a relationship with him, but there’s just going to be a fallout there, one way or another.

This. Aaliyah, I don’t think you’ll be able to maintain a relationship – certainly not one you’d want – with your father, once you’re able to do any of the things you need to. The relationship now is one of abuse of power, isn’t it? You’ve got the guilt and self-loathing he’s planted in you, and he uses it to the fullest, from what you’ve described. Quite apart from my opinion of him (ie. “he’s a shitstain on his good days”) I don’t see how you can maintain a relationship, or even much contact, once you’re free of him, without going on turning yourself inside out. I know you so want to, but will it be worth it, even if it’s possible? The man’s abdicated his duty as a parent, whatever he may think of himself as some sort of patriarchal hero. He should have a guilt trip the size of Lego City for what he’s done and is still doing.

Am I right in thinking that HRT treatment will include psychological therapy? Because I wish you were able to get into something, CBT perhaps (the type I have experience of) to get support and structure in changing these thought patterns. You deserve so much better than you’re getting now.

Major apologies if this is stepping over the line or going into armchair psych territory! I really, really want to see you free and living as the woman you are and getting help in healing these wounds.

In all seriousness, why are MRAs such bad writers? If it was just a handful of them I’d write it off, but it’s all of them, every single one.

I’ve noticed that with a lot of bigoted writers, not just MRAs. They all tend to have the same kind of ridiculous writing style, or a different loaded writing style that’s just as bad. My guess would be that they have to make it more convoluted for their readers and even themselves to believe that they’re not just some hate movement. Like, if they wrote more directly and to the point, they would probably look over their stuff later and think “Shit, I’m just a bigot.”

But that’s just what I think. I can’t prove it. So basically, it should just be chalked up as “I don’t know.”

Sure. After… that and six shots of gin and coffee, I’m feeling like I could take on the whole empire! And also like maggots are crawling inside my brainspace, their sweet, sweet voices whispering rapturous secrets about the songs that will drown the world in tears. But that’s an unrelated issue.
—

Broadly speaking, western women do suck. Again, since logic and reason typically eludes the people that comment here, I’m talking about western women as a group. Exceptions do exist (and the following list may or may not describe you personally, so don’t get your panties in a bunch). So what is wrong your typical Western woman?

Broadly speaking, if you will, I’ll make up a generalization – it’s my special skill
Now when I broadly paint the world with a brush, don’t look at me like I work for TRUSH
I speak of all of them as a group! Not just you, don’t you see, it’s every woman in the western world
All the bitches that won’t please me!
Anyway, panties all bunched up and you primed to accept my measly pontification
I shall now begin my meagerly generalization!

1) Bitchy, entitled attitudes, or just poor attitudes in general

First is a dozy, it’s a point that’s quite often seen
Them’s gots themselves an attitude problem, and they’re always so mean
They think they own the world and are entitled to an opinion, their minds awash with hogwash
(ha ha, like they have minds)
You see, the foremost problem plaguing all women in the western world
Is that they think they don’t have to suck on my dick.
Earlier when I said they sucked, I was referring to the general expression, not the things I want them to suck on
This means they have an attitude problem, a problem of incoherency, inconsisteny, they’re wanton floozies
They can’t even keep a rhyme scheme going, the skanks
Fibi, you slut, get back in the proper meter

2) A great percentage of them are significantly overweight. If I were 40 or 50 pounds overweight I wouldn’t be complaining about how women don’t give me the time of day, but to merely point out that it’s preferable to sexually desire a woman with a BMI under 30 is a misogynistic hate crime according to the commentariat here.

Second on my number of paltry denouncements is a simple proclamation:
People are fat all across the nation
Thus my declaration, you’ll admit, made with some flair:
If you’re a fat bitch, you don’t belong here, fair and square.
Because how you look, and what you do, is obviously all about me, agree?
And when I say you’re mean and also put on some weight
It’s not open for debate that the physical features of your feminine creatures
Is my number one concern, and obviously, the assumption I choose to use
Is that stating this fact, ie, you’re fat, is what makes me prone to be yelled at for abuse
Completely, of course, missing the point that desiring something is your own damn skin joint
Joined, as it is, to the notion that people exist to visually please
And tease
And make me all aflutter with their utter lack of butter
The notion that I’m allowed to choose my own potion! The idea that what I want here and there is
Somehow my business is a thing I cannot comprehend! Because I won’t make amends, or apologies
That I don’t want to fuck you makes YOU the obese personalities with bloated attitudes
Not me, oh no.

3) Their relationship philosophy could be summed up as it’s the man’s job to defer, serve and cater to them. They have an exhaustive laundry list of requirements for what they want in a man, but when it comes to what they’re supposed to bring to the table, all they think that’s required of them is that they show up. And they are doing you a huge favor just letting you be in their presence. Reciprocity is a foreign concept to them. Can you imagine if every man had an Infinite Jest-sized list of things they required in a woman and didn’t put any care or concern into what they should contribute to a relationship? Even if you decide to let her be the boss and attempt to “serve her” she will eventually come to see you as weak and dump you anyway. The best relationships are 50/50 in that each person is pulling their weight and contributing equally to the partnership. With too many women today, it’s almost like a service relationship. You are the waiter/cashier and they are the customer. Which of course does not work in the long run because eventually she will be repelled at the doormat-like behavior that is produced when you try to cater to her every whim and sideline your own needs and desires. You can only get away with being assertive and strong if she perceives your value to be way higher than hers, i.e. you’re Tom Brady/Brad Pitt and she’s a secretary.

Thirdly, this one has a far reaching consequence
And is the nature of my come-uppenance:
Only handsome people are allowed to have opinions, and only the beautiful creatures
With very slim features can have good attitudes
Any other combination is an estranged attempt at normalization of something obscene
And my infatuation with hinting that women do nothing in relationships means nothing is amiss
Because they don’t, it’s logic, it’s a group of western women, so just take it from me, in a relationship everyone should pull their own weight
Because relationships are like bench pressing in that both involve a lot of lying down and grunting
Ha ha, I’ll be here all night!
Indeed, my lack of ability to communicate my desires in a meaningful way and attain in my partners
The needed accusation is that because of my unfulfilled desires
the world at large is full of floozeys with no capacity for reciprocity, wouldn’t you agree
that in order for men and women to be free (fatties don’t count) they’d need to mount my
dick
24-7
Of course as a byproduct, communication and honesty and open expectation is rendered null and void compared to the game I intend to play with your head and your heart as I lead you astray, next point!

4) A lot of times it’s really like walking a tightrope. If you make one mistake, if you fail even once to say the right thing, have a dumb moment, or you do something in a less than elegant way, you get kicked to the curb. I’m not talking about major dealbreakers like abuse, repeatedly getting caught in lies or other irresponsible, reckless behavior, but just generally being human and not being suave, sophisticated and debonair at all times. You get dropped like a hot potato over superficial, silly stuff without any kind of larger consideration as to what sort of man you are, what you bring to the table, what kind of partner you would make in terms of being kind, supportive, generous, having character and integrity, having a good job, etc.

My fourth point is a point I make, and it’s a point MOST IMPORTANT
Namely that slavery is illegal and with the coming of free association I’m facing that my self absorbent
Myopic opinions result in the notion that merely making mistakes renders one out on the streets
Because in relationships between equal where everything’s 50-50 and weights are being pulled
Consideration should be made, not such silly things as compatibility or fun, but
Do I bring enough money, and I have paid for the house this week, is the mortgage all done?
I decry that my fine mental intentions
Does nothing to make someone stick around when I declare her attitude aboherent
And her fattitude discordant
And the ideas in my head must simply be true, that this is the case, for me and for you:
What I think I might be, ten years down the line
Is what you need to have in your head, all the bloody time.
What I think I might do, if I somehow get around
Is what you should appreciate, whenever my words make you frown
I need to make sure your attitude reveals that you trust my words
Because my actions, I’m afraid, will leave you slightly hurt
So I’ll spin us all a merry tale
And if you don’t believe it, of some choice words like “bmi” and “attitude”, I’ll avail
Indeed, the fourth point, is one I shall SIMPLY as such:
I might be an asshole *now*, but just wait 20 years, is that asking too much?

5) Just as guys in their teens and through their twenties focus solely on looks and ignore a woman’s character and other personality attributes, women start off preferring the bad boy because of the excitement that is generated by being with him. And it used to be in generations past that as they got older they realized what was more important for long-term success in a relationship…a guy who was responsible, mature, employed, supportive, kind, etc was a better long-term bet. But nowadays they stick with this bad boy mating strategy long past their teens and early twenties. Ironically, the guys that would make good boyfriends, husbands and fathers get no slack at all in dating situations with women, they are on zero-tolerance probation, but the guys that are absolutely not quality relationship material get plenty of rope to do whatever they want.

Next, in point 5, 2 decades of men
I’ll neatly surmise, dismiss, so we can really begin
To uncover the ire that lurks in my heart:
Namely that those damn women, of which I want NO part
Are all dating someone else, someone who isn’t as good and pure as I
And if they can’t see that, they’re the ones losing out, no lie
Their choices of men is what I’ll denigrate and berate
And skip past the point where the choices of women might be less than totally great
It’s all their fault, those damn double Y’s, and here’s why:
They want people who aren’t me, and they’d want to stick around with someone who is fun
And interesting
Rather than pontificating on how much money he’ll bring
Oh, say, ten years down the line or so?
Those damn women want amusement and joy and more than the feeling of being a toy
And that is the most misandric of ploy they deploys in their employ to make a man a helpless boy
That they can destroy as they throw him away like a broken toy which is what so annoys me that
I have taken the time to write out a structured list that’ll catch the gist of my intentions
And contain at the core a heart of beating venom, pure, of all my rage and screams
And unfulfilled dreams, as fat people with bad attitudes that I don’t like
Have fun with other people that aren’t me
THAT I’M NOT JEALOUS OF, STOP SAYING THAT!

6) due to items 1-5, there is just generally a paucity of relationship-quality women in the West.

Due to factors in my head, unrelated to the Planet Earth
I have decided that millions of people just have no worth
If they’re skinny, they shallow, if they’re big, they’re too much
They only want models and they’ll never touch
(me)

So at a certain point it’s kind of like “Why bother?” Western women today in general have poor attitudes, are not nurturing and kind, and are not appreciative of good qualities in the men that they date. It seems like the only way you can keep a woman around is to have significantly higher social value than her, i.e. the Brad Pitt/secretary example. Then you can treat her anyway you want.

And so, alas, me, such a sterling guy is left to fry in the pan of misandric women
That I can’t treat however I want, because I’m not Brad Pitt.
But damn, one day, after the plastic surgery and the implanted teeth of a movie star
I’ll be the guy they all watch from afar
And it’ll ME up on the hill! Screaming, oh yes I will, and they’ll want to
Well you know
And I’ll treat the bitches like they really deserve to be treated!
Like they’re nothing but meat for my own desires, and that they should just be happy that I’ve chosen to grace them with my presence, since they’re such flaky floozeys, right, Fibi?

At which point, we’ll answer:
“… So what’s changed, beyond the nose job?”

This. Aaliyah, I don’t think you’ll be able to maintain a relationship – certainly not one you’d want – with your father, once you’re able to do any of the things you need to. The relationship now is one of abuse of power, isn’t it? You’ve got the guilt and self-loathing he’s planted in you, and he uses it to the fullest, from what you’ve described. Quite apart from my opinion of him (ie. “he’s a shitstain on his good days”) I don’t see how you can maintain a relationship, or even much contact, once you’re free of him, without going on turning yourself inside out. I know you so want to, but will it be worth it, even if it’s possible? The man’s abdicated his duty as a parent, whatever he may think of himself as some sort of patriarchal hero. He should have a guilt trip the size of Lego City for what he’s done and is still doing.

Honestly, I feel the same way – I don’t think it’s possible for me to fix my relationship with my father, especially once I come out to him.

I just don’t know if at this point starting the estrangement early on by getting loans against his wishes is what’s best for me. I mean, first of all, I can imagine him doing some coercive or threatening shit to me if I really stand my ground and get the loans without his permission. I know that he’s going to flip out when I start HRT anyway, but still, doing it by getting the loans sounds very…sudden to me. It’s intimidating.

Am I right in thinking that HRT treatment will include psychological therapy? Because I wish you were able to get into something, CBT perhaps (the type I have experience of) to get support and structure in changing these thought patterns. You deserve so much better than you’re getting now.

I’m not sure although I’m still planning on getting a therapist regardless of whether psychological therapy is covered. As for the kind of therapy, I’d prefer something that has a bit of focus on the humanistic perspective, if you know what I mean. That would probably help me heal faster.

I really, really want to see you free and living as the woman you are and getting help in healing these wounds.

I do too. I’m just worried about me facing a shitty situation so abruptly. I mean, it’s not like my dad is just going to leave me alone any time soon.

You are the best judge of when you are ready. But it will probably feel abrupt and intimidating no matter when you do it.

PS I’m sure there will be a period where things are really bad, but you never know; it’s possible your dad will surprise you. He controls you right now because he can. Maybe when you get to a position where you don’t have to be in contact with him unless you want to, he’ll decide that he’s willing to have a relationship on your terms. This can take years or decades, but it does happen.

Each of these passages has faults of its own, but, quite apart from avoidable ugliness, two qualities are common to all of them. The first is staleness of imagery; the other is lack of precision. The writer either has a meaning and cannot express it, or he inadvertently says something else, or he is almost indifferent as to whether his words mean anything or not. This mixture of vagueness and sheer incompetence is the most marked characteristic of modern English prose, and especially of any kind of political writing. As soon as certain topics are raised, the concrete melts into the abstract and no one seems able to think of turns of speech that are not hackneyed: prose consists less and less of words chosen for the sake of their meaning, and more and more of phrases tacked together like the sections of a prefabricated hen-house.

He does realize that in a feudalistic society, only a couple of guys actually get to be kings, and only a few more get to be nobility, right? And the vast majority of men are peasants, or perhaps soldiers. But of course Roosh imagines that he’d totally be a king. Just like if this were Deadwood, he’d totally be Al Swearingen and not a hooplehead.

Can you imagine if every man had an Infinite Jest-sized list of things they required in a woman and didn’t put any care or concern into what they should contribute to a relationship?

Every man? No. The MRM/PUA community? No need to imagine.

A lot of times it’s really like walking a tightrope. If you make one mistake, if you fail even once to say the right thing, have a dumb moment, or you do something in a less than elegant way, you get kicked to the curb. I’m not talking about major dealbreakers like abuse, repeatedly getting caught in lies or other irresponsible, reckless behavior, but just generally being human and not being suave, sophisticated and debonair at all times. You get dropped like a hot potato over superficial, silly stuff without any kind of larger consideration as to what sort of man you are, what you bring to the table, what kind of partner you would make in terms of being kind, supportive, generous, having character and integrity, having a good job, etc.

This looks like English, but it lacks a certain something… I’m not sure what, but I think it’s a connection to reality.

And it used to be in generations past that as they got older they realized what was more important for long-term success in a relationship…

what generations past? Because “dating” didn’t really exist as a cultural behavior (in a way which allowed for, “bad boys”) until fairly recently.

You get dropped like a hot potato over superficial, silly stuff without any kind of larger consideration as to what sort of man you are, what you bring to the table, what kind of partner you would make in terms of being kind

I have yet to encounter a PUA who could be described as “kind”. Funny how it never occurs to them that their problem is that others do not see them as they see themselves.

Can you imagine if every man had an Infinite Jest-sized list of things they required in a woman and didn’t put any care or concern into what they should contribute to a relationship?

Just spend 15 minutes reading some PUA or MRA website talking about women. Their list has dozens of requirements for women, many of which are contradictory, like:

1. Women have to be skinny, but not because they diet. Women that diet are annoying. So women have to be skinny, and it has to be from a super fast metabolism and luck.

2. Women should have flawless skin. This shouldn’t come from makeup, though, because that’s being phony. Women should look like they are wearing makeup, but not actually be wearing makeup.

3. Women should never age past 30. If you’re a woman in a long term relationship, accept that your partner can cheat on you with younger women, because it’s your fault for having the audacity to age.

4. Even though you have to be skinny, you must also have big boobs. They can’t be implants, though, because that’s fake. However, your big breasts must never sag.

5. You must be a virgin, and also be willing to do anything your boyfriend likes in bed.

6. You must have a good paying job, because you are a mooch if you depend on your boyfriend or husband. You must also never steal jobs from deserving men, and if you’re a mom, having a job means you value money more than your own kids.

7. You must be submissive and defer to the man all the time. However, he can then disrespect you for being a doormat.

8. Always do all of the cooking and cleaning. Never ask for help, even if you work more hours outside the home than he does. Asking for help=nagging and bitching.

9. You are always responsible for raising the children and helping sick or elderly family members. If your partner ever helps you, throw him a parade for “babysitting” his own kids.

11. If you pay the bills and do the grocery shopping, apologize for spending that money. That money could have helped the man buy a new boat or take a camping trip with his buddies. Spending money on things like “the electric bill” makes the woman a selfish bitch.

12. If you are divorced, do all of the work raising the children, but never ask him to pay child support. Don’t apply for government help, either, because then the government might try to enforce the child support orders, and that is misandry.

So yeah, I can actually imagine the scenario of straight men making endless demands of women even though they themselves have very little to offer in return.

Fibinachi: Your writings have shown me the truth: MRA bloggers are gods–specifically, ancient, terrible gods from the depths of space, who destroy the sanity of those who look upon them.

As to why MRA bloggers are such horrible writers–it’s more Cargo Cult mentality. They have seen good writing, they know the general shape of it. But they don’t understand that the words need to have meaning, and the ideas underpinning the writing need to be solid and coherent. So if you look at half-sentences, it sometimes resembles something almost literary, but then you look at the whole thing, and you realize it’s a landing-strip made of coconuts.

Fibi’s suggestion of using a voice recorder is a good idea. Perhaps one of those little hand held tape or digital ones, then you don’t have to lug around a laptop.

Hone your skills a little bit, THEN try it out on your more supportive family members.

Perhaps they are having more trouble with you speaking differently, but still close to the way you usually speak. It could be hard for them to separate the way YOU sound from the way they think a man or a woman sounds. When you practice with someone so used to your voice allready, they might find it extra difficult to discearn changes.

Trying with someone who has not known you since birth in these earlier stages may get more constructive feedback.

Right, during pregnancy, you are allowed to have a baby bump at your tummy, but must not gain weight anywhere else (an exception might be made for boobs, depending on if the guy likes DD’s or not.) As long as everything else is thin, then you will be considered cute, but not sexy. You are allowed to have up to a week after childbirth to get back in to your pre pregnancy jeans, because that’s what some celebrity with a personal trainer and chef was able to do.

Oh, and even if you’re completely exhausted and miserable from pregnancy, you can’t take a break from cooking, cleaning, and caring for older children. Pretend you feel just like you did before pregnancy. If you ever complain, that means your wacky pregnancy hormones are just making you bitchy!

The worst I know if is a friend of mine who mowed her yard with a push mower when she was supposed to be on bed rest. She said she was sick of begging her husband to do it, and the grass was so tall she was afraid the city would fine them. Afterwards, he actually had the nerve to whine that the neighbors gave him dirty looks and judged him about having his very pregnant wife struggling with a heavy push mower. I guess the important thing is that he never had to get off his ass and stop watching football, god forbid. Oh, but women are too demanding, you know. If she had been a perfect wife, she wouldn’t have asked him in the first place. /rolls eyes

re: men worrying about balding, gaining weight, not looking like Brad Pitt

I admit that men deal with lookism and ageism to some degree. However, they need to understand that what they deal with in this area is nothing like what women deal with. It’s not in the same ballpark. So if you’re the kind of guy that makes fun of “fatties” and “hags”, then don’t expect me to feel much sympathy for you when you whine about male pattern baldness. Fair is fair.

You are the best judge of when you are ready. But it will probably feel abrupt and intimidating no matter when you do it.

PS I’m sure there will be a period where things are really bad, but you never know; it’s possible your dad will surprise you. He controls you right now because he can. Maybe when you get to a position where you don’t have to be in contact with him unless you want to, he’ll decide that he’s willing to have a relationship on your terms. This can take years or decades, but it does happen.

Probably. I guess I just want to avoid it until I’m relatively less stressed out. That way, even if it’s abrupt when it happens, I can deal with it better emotionally and so on.

As for him changing, that would require him to change his fundamental beliefs. But I suppose anything is possible.

He doesn’t have to change his fundamental beliefs. He just has to decide that he can have a relationship with someone who doesn’t adhere to them. After my uncle came out, he and my Catholic grandma didn’t talk for 20 years, but now they have a good relationship and he calls her every Sunday. She hasn’t stopped being a devout Catholic, she is just willing to put that on the back shelf while she’s around him.

They’re horrible writers because they want to be Oswald Spengler or Otto Weininger and such writing tends to come into English very stilted. German-language authors of that period have that problem, Herzl, Büchner, and Hauptmann, who were mainly discussing social ills and problems of liberation (for Herzl, from anti-semitism, for Büchner, from petty monarchy, for Hauptmann, from industrial abuses) produced stunted, clunky prose. In someone trying to imitate the 19th-century racial eugenicist social conservatives, the result is worse.

Aaliyah – I’m new here and haven’t commented in a long time, so I hope it doesn’t feel like I’m intruding, but a) I wish you lots of good luck with everything, and b) I had an idea about practicing with your voice. If you can get somewhere private to call, you could call lots of numbers (I’m thinking 1-800 numbers, for example – places where you’re just some random caller) and keep practicing, and when they start referring to you as “ma’am” or “miss” then you’ll know you’ve got it.

@rahu — I feel like the calling a 1-800 number seems like it’s not fair to the people who answer. My immediate response is, but they didn’t consent to help someone practice their voice. A slower concern is, a lot of 1-800 numbers are selling something — you might get a hard sell, or a resentful agent who thinks you’re wasting their time.

What about informational 800 numbers – like the Butterball questions-on-cooking-turkey line, or a come-visit-this-city-let-me-answer-your-questions line – something where there would be some talking, but no hard sells?

Read the blog. Nasty. rooosh is utterly repellant and so is this samsheash bloke. I am so tired of hearing about how we’re all sluts, we’re just waiting for someone alpha enough and then we’ll open our legs unquestioningly. Now we deserve to be beaten.

I am everything these “good men” believe they’re owed. Lost my virginity to my husband (no affairs), slim hourglass figure, long hair. Women like me view these men with the contempt they deserve. They are a bunch of bitter losers. I just wish they’d stop whining in the comments of every damn newspaper article I read about women’s issues at the moment.

Feminism is the ugly girls club. to wage war on the pretty girls of society. you know real girls have curves etc etc. women drinking,swearing and acting like men. in other words like bull dikes. radiacal feminist’s are ugly, man-hating misable ghouls. and like all misable people misey likes company. and they lie to other women. women who have a future you know like husband, children the white picket fence thing and rob them of that future. because they are insane, phyically grotuque and have unpleaseant personalties. and becuse men don’t want them and they are gay for other women they want to recruit more women to their cause becuase they get tired of licking the same pussy every night.

Return of Kings is just a site for bitter, old, used men to comment on how much their life sucks due to “Americen women” because they fear the truth that everything that turned to shit was hand made by them. They claim it’s okay to cheat on your wife for a younger model because it’s “In their masculine nature”, but criticize women if they cheat for a much less whiner of a man and more logically set (Which is also part of the female woman’s biological needs). This really isn’t a site you should even bother talking about. The members are truly disturbing, even for the average well thought out man. I hope no one bumps into these sewer rats. If you do, just ignore them and hope they scurry away back to the gutters. I really don’t agree with what many feminists believe, nor am I opposed to foreign marriage. The problem with ROTK is that they poison their minds with bitterness and narcissism to the point they became no better than raging feminists themselves.

We Hunted the Mammoth tracks and mocks the white male rage underlying the rise of Trump and Trumpism. This blog is NOT a safe space; given the subject matter -- misogyny and hate -- there's really no way it could be.