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Oh Elaine! You've taken a braver step than me, I can't really do posts for myself when I'm feeling really bad which is why I admire you so much, it's a horrible time you're going through - and I strongly suspect I may end up going something similar soon- but i don't want to dwell on my fears - I hop...

Hi Tracy You don't say why your Mum's moved in with you or whether it's a case of general frailty or other issues. Mental Capacity Assessment can take in many things. Whether the person has capacity to sort out their financial needs or physical needs etc. There's a 'grey area' in the MCA which means...

Dear Pet, Some homes don't do celebrations as it can be so confusing for the person concerned - in truth I think they're more for the family. I'd go for a small thing, a little cake and a candle for your husband to make a blow at (it doesn't matter if he can't extinguish it) and little but practical...

Hello Stuart, If you're the full time carer for the Mrs. then she should be getting Attendance Allowance which is there to pay for stuff like getting a cleaner in, if she's not getting it then you need to apply to SS. I agree with what others are saying about your primary concern being your daughter...

Hello Jackie If your partner's only being seen every 4 months then you should def have a CPN - a lot can happen in that time and you may get into a crisis situation, def go for a carer's assessment - especially if you have to leave him alone, even for a short time. I now have a 'credit card' + a sma...

Bad weekend - Mum stopped drinking and couldn't get her to take more than 250mls a day. Dilemma on Sunday - do I ring the family? She got very confused and quite adamant she wouldn't have a drink and she'd had so little - (I could have taken a very large glass of the white!). So I rang the family, s...

Hello Olivia, You haven't mentioned whether you're getting any help with looking after Mum, and I worry that you've been doing it for years with no help, I've recently been granted 'respite' of a day a week when I can get away. It doesn't take away the fact that I'm up 4 nights and 7 days - but bugg...

Hello Jackie, Has your partner got CPN input? Over the last few years there's been a new Act called the Mental Capacity Act - sometimes people have the capacity to decide about some things and not others - it's sorting out the 'fine line' that's the problem. I did many Mental Capacity assessments be...

Def a laugh out loud moment with Elaine's post, I think one one the few things I can manage is to keep the bathroom clean! But she's right with the therapy. Last week (or could be the week before) I had an Indian head massage, I was told my neck and shoulders were really tense! (I wonder why??) But ...

I'm posting my second message to you - my first disappeared!! I'm not the most brilliant person with a computer, but I'm starting to think that either I'm VERY bad or my computer or this site is infected with a virus. I'm going to have to get hold of my computer man, who will do his usual therapy an...