Jan Van Quirm wrote:Waste of time when you're on the brink of extinction - get right down to it straight off is the only way

Typical women. It's all just wham bang thankyou man, don't call me I'll call you, of course I'll respect you in the morning. What's wrong with showing a bit of love, of taking your time? No wonder pandas are an endangered species if the females don't even try to understand the poor males and regard them as nothing more than sex objects.

"Disliking Carrot would be like kicking a puppy.""You kicked a puppy," Lobsang said accusingly.

Something to do with bamboo I think - either he hits her with it too hard or sharpens it and sticks it under her claws.

That - or they think it's an aphrodisiac when in fact it's pretty crap nutritionally* although it's not too bad on fibre content. Maybe after all that arduous chewing and defecating they're both too tired to get on with the shagging?

*this has a justifiable basis biologically, but it's much more likely to be because pandas of both genders are ego-centric territorial little bastards in the wild and are in heat for only half an hour at a time so they hardly ever meet up to get it on...

"Some men see things as they are and ask why. Others dream things that never were and ask why not.” George Bernard Shaw