Pronoun Police and Privilege

Oh hello. It's been a while.On
27th December I posted the following on social
media;

2017
was the year that queer labelling and gender fluid binary madness
took hold. Middle class millennials who've rarely known struggle
found a cause to be upset by, gender fluidity and pronouns.
Particularly the rise of 'they'.

For
the record, I identify as pansexual, queer and non binary. My ovaries
have never functioned properly and I have high levels of testosterone
(explains a lot really). But I couldn't give a rats twat about being
misgendered because in the grand scheme of
things, it's insignificant.

Insisting
on gender neutral pronouns is pretentious. It's elitist to expect
people unschooled in queer academia to use it. Do you and live your
true authentic self etc but I really can't be arsed using 'they'
while numerous queer siblings the world over are actually suffering
for being who they are while you howl demands from your first world
soapbox.

Yes
call out bigotry where the intention is hateful but perhaps stop
being offended by every tiny infraction? Save that anger for real
injustices and harness that energy for the greater good.

P.S.Two
great bastions of British comedy recently nodded to queer labeling.
The League of Gentlemen with Babs' ACRONYM and French and Saunders
with LGBLT. I approve. Both subtly takes the piss while being
respectful and if we can't laugh at ourselves, well we're all fucked.

P.P.S.Lewis
Hamilton is a choad.

I
received a lot of support publicly and privately from queer people,
transgender people, straight people, those unable to post publicly due
to their position and a mother of trans children. I also received the
wrath of the terminally offended.

My intention was not and
will never be to deny trans or non binary folk the right to exist.
I'm their biggest cheerleader especially regarding visibility. I've been called 'Satan', 'offensive', 'hateful' 'old' (true), 'will
die soon' 'grumpy' (guilty), 'fucking disgusting', a 'bitch' (yep),
'rude', 'bigoted' and a 'Daily Mail fascist' amongst other things in
the last few days. I've also been accused of transphobia. Yes I'm old, I come from
a generation where many trans, non gender conforming and queer people have and
had thicker skins. Incredible angels and warriors who lived they're
true selves long before queer academia, social media and terminology like 'non bianry' existed. They
deserve so much respect and get all of mine. I've not spoken
about this publicly before but last year I walked away from a regular
well paid gig as the management wouldn't change their policy
regarding transgender people. In my kink life, I run a pansexual monthly event for those outside the heteronorm. A safe space
for trans and non binary folk, many who don't have the luxury of
social cliques to be themselves. So don't wave around transphobe like
a wilted lettuce when you know sweet F.A. about me.

Those
who know me in real life know my intentions, however sarcastic or
bitchy, are never hateful. I don't hate anyone. Except bigots, those
who commit unconsensual acts, Trump and James Corden. Yes I'll admit I was
snarky about privileged, moral puritans. I guess I was and am tired
of many of them rounding up on people who oppose their views. Funny how those same people can't even look you in the eye in person but happily bash you online. I know
numerous fierce, smart and opinionated people tell me
in private they feel they can't say anything online these days for
fear of the Wrath of Woke. Truly interesting people are being gagged
for having a sense of humour or voicing opposing thought. That's pretty crap.

Regarding
pronouns, I didn't mean the 'I can't be arsed' bit. I'll call you
what you whatever you want babe. Yes I find it precocious but if it
helps an individual feel groovy, cool but your identity is so much more
than a word. And there are far bigger fights to be fought.Everyday I'm incredibly grateful for who I am; a
loud, opinionated, queer, kinky, ridiculous person who has performed
all over the world in a wig and just happens to have a vagina. There
are millions who don't have that same privilege. LGBTQ+ people
have come a long way, particularly in the west but homophobic and transphobic hate
crimes are still on the rise. Outside our safe spaces and queer
bubbles there are a lot of people in the world who still loathe us. Every
single human that doesn't conform to heteronormativity or gender
constructs deserves the freedoms we have in the first world. But rather than work together
to combat this, we're too busy bickering among ourselves over words. And words can only harm when the intention is hateful.

There are clubs and venues I'll probably never work for again after this but hey ho. I've fought bigger battles and still here.Thank you to those who publicly defended me and could see my intentions aren't evil. It's tough these days huh?!I'm
sorry if I offended with my gregarious sarcasm. I'm not sorry to
those who think it's cute to bully anyone who opposes their
opinion.

x

P.S.There's a current UK TV ad for vodka featuring fabulous queer people. The strap line being “Labels are
for bottles, not people”. Yep.