Cheating or not?

Dh and I have been in a relationship for 13 years (since we were 14) over that time we've had issues and he has left me a few times.. He claims that he left to try to fix things and work on our family, but during these times he's had absolutely NO contact with me or our children.. We would call him and he would not answer or call the kids back or anything, for days, weeks, or even months at a time! During these times I would start talking to and going out with and even having relationships with other men. Some of these men have been people that we both know because like I said we have been together since age 14 and know the same people.. I'm not saying what I have done is not wrong but he is constantly calling me a cheater, and throwing the past in my face, that I made us look stupid and weak to others.. And he thinks that these other men are still out to get him somehow. He says that I have some sort of mental problem, like manic depression because I had relationships with these people while he wasn't talking to me. I am starting to feel completely disgusted with myself because if the things he is saying to me.. So then I say "I can't change the past, and you are choosing to be with me, so stop bringing it up!" but he says he is stuck with me because I'm going to make some stupid decision that ruins our lives even more if he leaves me! He says this because during the times that's he's left me I had to make some decisions like filing for child support because like I said I had no contact/support from him for months, and filing divorce.. He tells me daily that I ruined our lives by making those decisions.. So my question is.. Do you consider that cheating? Cause I'm getting really tired of being treated like I'm some kind of horrible person.

Dh and I have been in a relationship for 13 years (since we were 14) over that time we've had issues and he has left me a few times.. He claims that he left to try to fix things and work on our family, but during these times he's had absolutely NO contact with me or our children.. We would call him and he would not answer or call the kids back or anything, for days, weeks, or even months at a time! During these times I would start talking to and going out with and even having relationships with other men. Some of these men have been people that we both know because like I said we have been together since age 14 and know the same people.. I'm not saying what I have done is not wrong but he is constantly calling me a cheater, and throwing the past in my face, that I made us look stupid and weak to others.. And he thinks that these other men are still out to get him somehow. He says that I have some sort of mental problem, like manic depression because I had relationships with these people while he wasn't talking to me. I am starting to feel completely disgusted with myself because if the things he is saying to me.. So then I say "I can't change the past, and you are choosing to be with me, so stop bringing it up!" but he says he is stuck with me because I'm going to make some stupid decision that ruins our lives even more if he leaves me! He says this because during the times that's he's left me I had to make some decisions like filing for child support because like I said I had no contact/support from him for months, and filing divorce.. He tells me daily that I ruined our lives by making those decisions.. So my question is.. Do you consider that cheating? Cause I'm getting really tired of being treated like I'm some kind of horrible person.

I can understand how someone would call that cheating, but what kind of man leaves his family for months without any communication? Are you sure you want to be with a man who leaves you to take care of your children alone and then puts you down for choices you make?

I can understand how someone would call that cheating, but what kind of man leaves his family for months without any communication? Are you sure you want to be with a man who leaves you to take care of your children alone and then puts you down for choices you make?

Man if I were you, I'd leave. Seriously. He sounds like a child. What if you were calling because your child had a life threatening injury? No matter how mad dh and I may be at each other, it doesn't mean something bad hasn't happened so we ALWAYS pick up.

Man if I were you, I'd leave. Seriously. He sounds like a child. What if you were calling because your child had a life threatening injury? No matter how mad dh and I may be at each other, it doesn't mean something bad hasn't happened so we ALWAYS pick up.

One time my daughter did have in injury she broke her arm and he hadn't been talking to us for like 3 months so I didn't even call him, then when he found out he called all like wtf happened to my daughter and why didn't you call me?

One time my daughter did have in injury she broke her arm and he hadn't been talking to us for like 3 months so I didn't even call him, then when he found out he called all like wtf happened to my daughter and why didn't you call me?

First and foremost, that's called abusive. When you look at the bigger picture, making you feel worthless and blaming you for his decisions to leave for months on end with no contact, and them saying he it's stuck with you is totally demeaning. As for looking for child support you did what any normal person would have done!Also, who did he have relationships with while away? And do you believe the stories he tells you?What I would suggest you decide is, would you like to keep him around? If you would, some couples counseling might be suggested to take care of past issues and to move forward. Regardless, you are a strong woman and would have to be to look after children all this time in that situation! Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise!

First and foremost, that's called abusive. When you look at the bigger picture, making you feel worthless and blaming you for his decisions to leave for months on end with no contact, and them saying he it's stuck with you is totally demeaning. As for looking for child support you did what any normal person would have done!Also, who did he have relationships with while away? And do you believe the stories he tells you?What I would suggest you decide is, would you like to keep him around? If you would, some couples counseling might be suggested to take care of past issues and to move forward. Regardless, you are a strong woman and would have to be to look after children all this time in that situation! Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise!

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