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Wednesday, April 2, 2014

The Importance of Writing Friends ~ And A Giveaway!

I’m so delighted to be posting here at CC&C. When Jaime and Anne asked me if I’d like to join in the fun, I couldn’t say yes fast enough. Because I treasure these ladies’ friendships, I thought I’d post today about how important writing friends are to me.

The Importance of Writing Friends.

Writing is a solitary pursuit. Hours spent sitting, staring at a screen, sifting through the scenes in our skulls. As a result, writers can get tunnel-vision, introspective, and lonely. We need friends. In the same way that being a stay-at-home mom of young children can make you feel isolated and in need of some adult company, the screen-staring writer needs company, too. Here are three things writing friends do for each other.

Mary Connealy and me. Mary's one of my
dearest writing friends

Provide Encouragement

Nobody knows what you’re going through like someone who is going through it, too. They understand the sacrifices you make to write. They 'get it' when you say your characters have gone rogue, or that they wouldn’t let you sleep. Just having someone to talk to who recognizes the importance of a black moment, a character arc, or a misplaced modifier is refreshing and encouraging. A friend on the journey helps you keep your chin up and your head down. .

Provide Accountability

At a writer's retreat with some friends.

Any writer without a contract or deadline runs the risk of aimlessness. "So I don’t write today. So what?" If you string enough of those ‘so what?’ kinda days together, your stories never get written. Enter the writing friend. A writing friend can help you set goals and check up on you along the way. You might decide to exchange critiques so you have to produce something worthwhile to trade. You might even set up a friendly competition, whether it’s completing a manuscript by a certain date or writing the most words in an hour. Anything to help you get the words on the page.

One of my besties, Georgiana

Spiritual and Emotional Health

A writing friend can also help take your emotional temperature. Are you freaking out? Are you depressed? Are you blasé, or giddy? Are you so mixed up, you can’t tell? A writing friend can let you know when you're swinging too far one way or another, when you're majoring on minor stuff, and when your obsession with your amazon reviews is unhealthy.

Writing is an emotional roller-coaster, and it helps to have a friend to sit in the front car and raise their hands with you. This writing friend can help balance you, help you keep a check on maverick emotions and self-defeating thought-cycles. They can pull you out of the mire and keep your feet on solid ground.

I've come to know the value of writing friends. They’ve pulled me through some tough times, happy-danced with me during the good times, and allowed me to do the same for them.

ACFW Selfie :)

Though, as I look back over these points, I realize it isn’t just writers that need friends. Encouragement, accountability, and emotional equilibrium are perks of any friendship. J So, whether you’re a writer or not, give a shout out in the comments to one of your friends (then let them know so they can come see the comment.)

A Giveaway

To celebrate my first post here at Coffee Cups & Camisoles, I’ll give a copy of A Bride Sews With Love in Needles, CA to one person who comments with the name of a friend and what you love about him or her, AND I'll also send a copy to that friend!

Here's a bit about the book:

As Harvey Girl Meghan Thorson waits on doughboys at the El Garces Hotel in Needles, California, she meets Caleb McBride, a local horse breeder whom the townsfolk have branded a coward and profiteer. Will threads of love unite this couple, or will pride keep them forever apart?

I live a very long way from my sister, but yesterday I had lunch with my sister-in-law, who is the sister of my heart, and it was so refreshing. We talked for HOURS! I couldn't believe it when I got in the car and looked at the time. The afternoon had just melted. :)

Great post, Erica! I have a hard time singling out any one person, especially when I think about the Tantalizing Tea Ladies. They're kind of a package deal. But, I think that Teresa is maybe one who really sticks out in my mind. She and I go back to 5th grade. Even though we were out of touch with each other for many years, when we did connect again, it was like those lost years never happened. I remember talking to her on the phone after we hadn't seen each other for probably 10 years and she told me she named her daughter after me. That was very humbling and touching for me.

Great first post! :) Friends are what keep us going. I have a special book loving friend that I love to discuss all things bookish with. We have different tastes and that provides for great conversations! She has kept me plodding along in my life of raising kids - reminding me how important that is. lattebooks at hotmail dot com

Melissa! Howdy to a fellow homeschool mom! My youngest has just two more months to go before he graduates (Lord willing!) Those encouragements from people who are important to us are so invaluable. Sometimes Stay-at-home moms can feel invisible, and just knowing someone cares and sees us can make a huge difference!

I have had and still have several friends that have been with me through thick and thin for many many years. I love them bunches but now that my daughter is grown I count her as my best friend, well besides my husband that is, ha. I think of her whenever I want to go shopping, out for coffee and girl talk or just to sit outside and "chew the fat". And I'm fortunate that she, her husband and my two grandchildren live in our neighborhood right across the street from us!

My daughter in law Shari is a very sweet person who is always there for me.She has a very giving spirit and is a great encourager.When my husband was in hospice and after he passed she was there for me every day. And I love her dearly.thank youmcnuttjem0@gmail.com

My friend Kathy and I have been friends for 30+ years. I know that I can call her anytime - day or night, and she will be there for me. She probably knows more about me than my mother (LOL)!! She is always ready to lend an ear, and offer encouragement - without judging. She has been with me through the bad times, and the good, and has helped me move several times - I always say that is a sign of a good friend, especially when you have as much to be moved as I do (LOL)!! She is an avid reader, has been very ill - and would appreciate a new book to read!!

I enjoyed your post, Erica - welcome to CCC!! Thanks for the opportunity to win copies of your book!!