Hi guys. I’ve started a blog page about my journey to hell and back, in the preparation and mental and physical challenges I’ll face training for the dragons back 300k. A navigation based mountain event that hugs the spine of Wales north to South.

I hope to share with you all my hardships and elation during the next 12 weeks of arduous training and throughout the event itself.

Hopefully it will inspire people to take on new challenges. Surround yourself with positive people and share memories of pain and joy. This is how we grow, it’s how we confront our fears and see what were really made of.

This is my posthumous post on the dragons back race 2017. Reflection of the good, the bad and the damn right ugly. Casting my mind back to all my long blog posts i wrote months in advance about how im preparing physically and mentally for the challenge. The belief was there, The soul felt strong and the body felt capable.

I approached the race with alot of excitement but was weary of the huge task at hand. During the event the weather was very hot at times, clagged in with 10m visibility, we had rain and high winds. The whole erray of Welsh Mountain weather shook us up. The appreciation of even making it to the start line was prevalent on every section of each day. What an honour it was to be here. Throughout my time on days 1 to 4 my navigation and cool head prevailed. My decision making was good. I looked after my body, my feet and my hydration. I prioritised water so packed “heavy” meaning I had more water weight on board. This was something that didnt concern me. I might of had more weight initially but the priority of adequate water intake was huge on my agenda as the cumulative dehydration over the coming days could take hold of you weren’t smart. I was slow but steady and always had some in reserve for the next mountain, mile and problem solving situation every conpetitor indefinitely came across. My thoughts were clear and my judgement had clarity.

So far so good. Until the mind blowingly challenging descents started to play havoc with my lower limb on my right leg. Pain I’ve experienced before on many occasion, but feeling it creep in on day 2 meant I’d be regulary tapping into my reserves and using so much more physical and mental resolve that was needed. It turned out to be my nemesis and my downfall.

Running a futher 23 miles on day 2 after feeling the initial pop in my anterior compartment of my lower leg, and the following day of 44 miles proved unbelievably tough. The mountains never eased and the pain kept growing.

By halfway through day 4 I succumbed to the earth shattering pain that came my way and had to withdraw. Something I’ll never forget, something I’ll hold onto dearly. A feeling noone can truly describe, and one I will use to myadvantage in future challenges.

Now a week on, as i sit here staring painfully down at my cast walking boot with my crutches ever ready in my peripheral vision, I ponder and reflect. I keep playing the event over and over in my head. Shedding a tear and wishing I could of done more. Willing my body to continue, admitting defeat and staring failure in the eyes. Replaying that road on day 4 when I could feel my right lower leg pop and explode. Vividly holding onto the sheer agony it presented. Still believing in heart and mind, but not being physically able to pick myself up off the hill and carry on.

Acceptance that this time I wasnt invincible was a tough thing to do. All the pain and sacrifice leading up to this point fell insignificant to having to admit to failing. Having to accept that I was weak. In that moment I felt numb, in that moment i was crushed, but in that moment I also grew. I became stronger.

Even though the ligaments and tendons were detached, the bone suffered trauma and my race was over, I again sat there in that moment and reflected. I sat down on the Hill, the tears streaming my my puffed up eyes, and I called my partner telling her what just happened. The sound of her voice on the phone made my heart sink and made me realise what really is important in this life. Having her there with me in mind and spirit kept me going as far as I could reach. Knowing she’d be waiting for me kept me excited, made me thankful and made me feel alive. It was raw emotion that I’ve never felt. Hearing her soft voice and unconditional love in her words captivated my energy and empowered me. Reporting back to my family with the news I failed was hard but they didn’t care. All the cared about was that I was okay. I’m so proud to have the family i have.

Having an amazing support network around you. My brother, mum dad and sister. All my relations and friends have been there for me throughout this process. I thankyou all from the bottom of my heart.

The memory of Having met some seriously inspirational people on my journey through Wales will live on, and will most cetainly overpower the pain I’m feeling in this moment in time. I will be back and I will be stronger, I will have this experience to reflect on for the rest of my life and take strength from my weaknessess. Always adapting and overcoming and striving to be a better person.

It has taught me to admit failure and learn from it. We are our own worst enemies at times putting ourselves under stringent repetitive self criticism, We put ourselves down daily, we envy others, we rush through life with little thought as to what’s happening now, we always want more.

We always feel more is better. Running futher over more days is bigger kudos and more extreme, we become fixated on one upmanship and being the tough hero that everyone looks upto. But we forget that we are only human, and humans are allowed to fail. It’s okay to fail. You’ll build from it.

People have already said to me, “Ed, i thought you were ready, what happened. You had all day to do each days distance, your a trainer with years of experience; you should of smashed it no problem” and “does your programming and methods really work” I heard that too. The reality is u either stand up and be counted and try to better yourself and fail, or you stand back from the sidelines and gob off with sly remarks and insensitive comments. These people need to reflect on what really makes them happy. They havnt accepted failure or if they have, they have forgotten it’s raw and unequivocal hurt. There bitterness has ruptured there wallowing souls. Until they honestly realise how hard it is to accept failure they won’t grow, they won’t be happy and they can never understand how it feels to overcome this acceptance.

My preparation might of had chinks in its armour this time around but a proud man isn’t always a successful one, and i have yo hold my hands up and say my prep wasnt always without its adversity. Having obtained a stress fracture back in january due to consecutive 120 mile weeks. This is a learning curve to build from. 200 miles of mountain running isn’t something you have the formula for. Sometimes there are just too many variables and things you can never preempt. Aslong as character prevails and honesty with yourself stands tall in front of anything, then you’ve done well in my eyes.

It will be a while till I will be back running. But despite the severe injury I sustained I will draw from the positives and abolish the negatives. It’s going to be hard but it’s the only way and the right way. Failure will always be a tool for growth and with the right people around you can be a blessing in disguise.

So here’s to the recovery. A small glass will be raised and a centimental thought will be shed. A discouraged weakened individual I became will shortly be a distant memory, and the pain will turn to triumph. The self doubt is something I’ll hold onto forever as for now I see it as a remedy for self discovery. Fragility can be your biggest burden or your most powerful possession.

Let the failures uplift u. Strive to move forward, for I’m truly grateful for the people I have my life.

With only 8 days to go until the start of this year’s dragons back, the apprehensive mind games are starting to flutter into my neural endings. Feeling myself getting a bit agitated and irritable with things. Maybe I shouldn’t keep going over the 3D OS maps of the route were going to be traversing across for 5 days.

It made my chuckle when I saw the route on the computer in 3D. *for the 10th time. …… Seeing how the route selection went through every mountain ascent possible. The experience is certainly going to be epic. I knew this was the case of course, but to see all the flat ground either side of our route just sadistically made me laugh and did knot the stomach a tad. Why couldn’t we just pop either side of that mountain, noone would know……he says knowing the world is watching on our live trackers. The bus option is out the window this time and my legs will have to man up!

So crash training my way into my taper…what on earth does that mean. Basically it means u fuck yourself up in a panicked state of Ill preparedness and try and improve your fitness with only 3 weeks left till race day. You go beyond the pain barrier and you keep going and going and going. And going…..and going. Until you seek to be in a wretching state ,potentially some nasal blood or at best blood from the mouth and ears..it’s happened before. 😉

It’s a method we use in the corps before we get recruits ready for a specific arduous task. It sharpens the mind and overloads the body into a complete state of paralysis. But it’s this overload that sometimes we need in order to overcome obstacles and mental barriers we so often self inflict on ourselves. There is no rest bite, no 3-5 minute rest periods between sets, no intra workout shit can of protein powder or supplement; just pure grit, heart and determination to succeed. The sessions are long, very long and intense.

The strength gurus out there or the conditioning experts *self proclaimed will tell me….what are you doing? You don’t know what your doing? The body needs rest in the sessions to hit your peak output. Oh fuck off you ! I’ll not deadlifting on a platform listening to Justin Bieber on my beats my dre headphones eyeing up some chick in the gym. I’m hurting unrelentingly in order to eradicate fear, banish the perception of pain, physically and mentally overcome adversity, and train my body to be a machine. It does what it want it to, not what I’m told. No book can write out and out effort, and no program can cater for the inner self belief u need to have.

My week looked like this. Each session was 2 hours long. Involved alot of running up very steep hills, with exercises like jump squats and tuck jumps in between. Upon completion of an hour I moved to heavy drags and weighted lunges. This resumed for the next 45 minutes. To finish i added 40 lbs of weight and ran repeats of steep stairs. Mimicking the leg churning effects I’ll feel come day 3 and 4 of the race. Leaving nothing to chance.

This happened every day for 5 days. No rest. No play list, no help from anyone, noone motivating me, noone getting me out of bed, no fancy gym towell and bayliss and hardy conditioners or body lotion. There Is no requirement for luxurious items. Train yourself out of this mentality and it’ll make you appreciate the small bits of morale you’ll seek out on the Hill.

The aim of this approach, as discussed, is a very debatable and I’d only recommend it to someone I know can deal with the stress it comes with. It’s more of a confidence thing with me. I’m not a 60kg runner anymore and don’t fit the stereotype of the ectomorphic ultra marathon man. Running is not entirely natural to me and has taken me years and years of perseverance to get where I am today. No shortcuts, no fitness dvds and no revolutionary HIT class promising me legendary status in 15 minutes. Sorry was that 12 minutes…..no its actually as low as 4 minutes nowadays. 4 minutes to fitness. Negative!!!!! This is proposterous and is the bain of the fitness industry and why people never truly feel failure or see progression.

The past 5 days running has seen me take on some serious mileage and test the waters of where I’m really at. Honest, long and sacrificial training. With 2 weeks to go till i stand on the start line at Conwy castle, my mind casts back 12 months when I started the dragons journey. A journey that would see many a stomach reflux, incidents of severe cramp, tendon tears and even broken bones; but I’m still standing and ready to take on this mind altering and life changing experience. I think.

Throughout this blog i have spoken in depth about my training, but now as the race gets ever closer I think to myself “you can never really be fully prepared for an ordeal like this” “just role with it, hurt, and try to come out the other side. Whether its Being eaten alive by the Rhienogs, destroyed by snowdon or crushed by the leg busting mileage. At the end of the day you’ve gotta wake up each day and crack 40 miles, something you can’t really control and prepare for. Experience, intuition, robustness and self confidence will be the main areas I’m going to draw from. It’s all part of the journey to feel like giving up. It’s whether we prevail through the fear or give into it. I can’t answer that question now. Even getting to the start line has asked many questions of my want to do this.

I’m sure I’ll leave some of my soul out on each checkpoint as the 5 days unfolds. But what I give to this, I hope to get back ten fold. I hope to gain valuable feedback as to how far the body can be taken and mentally what can I overcome. All my weaknesses will be exposed and the best way to deal with it I believe, is not to panic. Let the deep psychological and physiological pain ask questions of you, and come back with an answer. I want to see how I react being miles out my comfort zone. That is know is a certainty.

So the past 5 days have seen me do a marathon morning navigation run on the inhospitable dartmoor. Taking me 4 hours to complete the run. It was a very early start 0300 I drove from my house 4 hours to Devon. I had a rough route planned in my head and used map and compass. I worked off mag bearings on the move, mainly to spot heights with a brief Map confirmation. I noted the cairns and high features and alot of the nav was intuitive and drawn from my experience. It certainly plays a huge part of the running, being the master of your own route choice I’ve done many an ultra that has a very clear defined route and allows you to get in the grind zone of switching off. This however, gives u no choice. You have to remain switched on. Getting lost will only increase the anxiety and stress your body dosnt need.

Having completed it is headed west even more to meet my mum. The evening I did another 12 miles. Totalling a daily mileage of 38. It Felt more like 100 and was fueled by alot of hydration and a few of mums finest brownies.

The next day I did 16 miles in the morning. Running on tired legs really hit home. I opted for more hilly terrain and a target time of 3 hours. I’m getting stricter on myself for staying accountable. A few time pressures to contend with. In past gone I’ve hated this approach but I wanted to see if I could still run relatively consistent having done 38 miles the day before. It was very difficult and the legs felt like lead. But……I came in in 2 hours 50. So in my books that’s a great success. Hitting targets when the mind and body are saying NO !!!

The following day *Saturday I hit some higher intensity work for shorter duration. I had my amazing partner to train with. Pushing me hard. Motivating me to keep going. She says I never sweat or get tired, but today I was hanging. The pain was intrinsic. The session was stair climbing. A huge leg and lung blowout. The heart adaptations from a session like this is incredible and will most definitely aid my prep without fatiguing the immune and nervous system too much. 9 repeats up and down multiple sets of stairs soon became hell. Especially after 54 miles previously. We both felt a huge feeling of elation after and morale was high.

We repeated the session Sunday also but progressed to 12 sets.

Monday saw me complete 10 miles with 1300m of vertical ascent in. A very hilly day today. Into London for work for the afternoon and evening.

Tuesday and Wednesday see rest days. Being so close to the race i wanted to push and get some confidence. The taper starts now. Easy long drag into the race.

After a very long and frantic 2 months I’m back on the blog and ready to relay alot of information, so get your heads around it and enjoy

Since my last post I’ve clocked up several hundred miles and over 8000m of climbing. I’ve had a bad niggling injury to my right foot second met head that’s painstakingly forced me to sit out of many sessions or cut them short. Adapt and overcome has been a forefront mantra that has been tested to the limits, but has allowed me to continue to build and maintain my dragons head.

My main focus of you’ve been reading the blog, has been quality over quantity. Hill work has been the precedence of all my program and empty miles has never been on the menu. Maybe if I was eating out at a cheap fast food restaurant, but I’m dining with fillet steak and homemade hot chocolates, so the pointless lethargy of countless long runs has not featured much.

Having said that, the disgusting quad torchery on the steep ascents of the south downs was a precursor to my injury and something I have not taken lightly. The immense change in mechanics and demands on the foot forced my feet to succumb to the constant plantar loafing of the 2nd met head on my right foot and created a crack in the bone. This set me back from the hill climbing for a few weeks but allowed me to seek other forms of training, and became an overall positive experience. It made me really appreciate the journey I’ve been on since signing up the Dragons back race, and how thankful I am to be on this path of self discovery *mind the pun. Learning from the successes in training and the failures is the biggest key when pushing the limits of human performance. Be humble and accept when shit happens.

I’d just done back to back 20 mile runs with over 6000ft climb in each session. The 3rd day I tried 15 miles with 3000ft and couldn’t walk at the end. Boo hoo ! I was upset limping to the car, but after a cup of tea and some peanut butter I reflected and said to myself……”OK Ed, your foot might be broken but at least it’s still attached” I laughed in a sinister manner and again spoke out, “bones can break, but the mind will go on strengthening” that was recovery psychi. And it prevailed.

My longest week looked like this:
100 miles of running within 6 sessions, 18000ft of elevation gained, 24000 calories burned, 1500 lunges, a few kettlebell carries, 40 english breakfast extra strong tea bags, 2 pots of Nutella, 4 roast chickens. *skin on of course. I’m not calorie counting if your wondering. 🙂 30 roast potatoes, 18 flat Whites, a whole lot of blood sweat and tears, and a few motivational videos *of people in pain. That’s about it. Not exactly the tuna fish, broccoli and celery sticks I see people rationing these days In persuit of a lean body or sixpack.

This was ruthless, emotional phys that required a shit load of fuel. I ate huge and reaped the benefits. My dues were paid, my kidneys overworked and my gut health overwhelmingly destroyed, but sometimes when training for a 200 mile run you have to. You will crash and you will burn but as long as you die trying and not hungry, you’ll die happy.

Day 14 saw me try a new part of the downs that I was slightly unfamiliar with. Well I knew it would involve steep climbing and knee crushing descents, but wasn’t sure of the specific route so recceed it on the go. It was to prove a success.

This weekend was a planned brick building Saturday and Sunday. For those not familiar; it basically means a long run both days. The saturday acts as a pre fatiguing element to Sunday to see how the body deals with running on tired legs. As a competent runner of hills Im constantly trying to mimic as the demands of the Welsh Mountains in my preparation. To familiarise myself with the days upon days of the not only the long distances but more prevalent and more painfully, the climbing. 16000m of it over the 5 days. Ouch !!!!!

Running long miles week after week, month after month with the soul purpose of gradual incrementations of mileage will only get you so far when it comes to a race like the dragons. A more traditional approach to a 200 mile race would be to running a minimum of 60-80 miles a week in training and the majority would be on flat terrain. Although a huge advocate of base building I’m also very aware of the multitude of skillsets needed for dragons. Being a great long distance runner is not always the optimal. There’s more technicalities about this challenge.

Whilst being a classic ectomorphic, light frame, 60kg weathered fell runner might have its benefits over the longer more rolling sections of the race; I believe showing Strength, guille, a smart head, a strong mind, and a large amount of grit will also prevail. Especially when the steep arduous climbs, and torcherous weather conditions set in. Versatility as an athlete is important. Not just being a runner for running sake because it’s a running race. Say that fast 10 times.

Play to your strengths and bring up your weaknesses in training. Don’t always believe more is always better because the race is so long. Think smart.

Day 15 *Sunday brick, saw me complete 20 miles at a slow and steady pace. The route did involve so good climbing however but all was done at a walking pace. The legs felt fresh from Saturdays hill focus so I was happy with the rest, hydration and recovery protocols I adopted the 24 hours post Saturdays run. A valuable area not to overlook. Again its feedback. I was roughly 4 hours on my feet in stormy weather so as a training benefit, the fat adaptation effect (using fat as fuel) would prove to be highly beneficial.
A well needed assessment run to see where I’m currently at in my prep. Brick runs are highly stressful and require a careful and methodical approach in which to implementing them into your routine. It also shows you what your craving as fuel post run too. Is it Sweet, carb, etc. The beautiful Nutella?

Rushing into these brick sessions however can literally break you in your tracks with overuse issues. Be proactive not reactive in your recovery building up to them. Prehab is always king over rehab.

Day 16 saw me head for my bike and perform a 40km time trial. I was interested to see what crossover effect the long hill repeats running would have on my wattage and output in the cleats.

I’m definitely a huge fan of cycling as a cross training tool. It provides me with valuable feedback as to my lactate tolerance whilst deloading the impact stresses. Mechanically it shows me how effective I can be at producing power and high outputs in deep hip flexion. Something that I value highly when it comes to the climbing I’ve been talking about. As a zone 2-3 ride for 80 minutes on steep ascending terrain, it also gives me huge cardiovascular benefits. Win win. Ensure your bike is set up for you ,it matches your height and does not impede your pull phase. Also by using cleats it allows your to pedal in a optimal pattern producing efficiency.

This next week sees me focus highly on my mechanics and optimising my gait patterns. All the climbing, descending and volume takes its toll. Some time out to reestablish some neural connections and low level structure work on the tissues will pay dividends and hopefully work in my favour.

Wales day 1 and 2 recce this week. All focus on the prehab to that. Follow me as I take on the first 2 days and establish some sort of strategy

A huge Saturday and Sunday working on a brick strategy of climbing and strength specific hill training.
Day 11 saw me head back to the hills, with a plan to complete 6 miles with a considerable amount of vertical climbing. I managed 650m of vertical ascent in just over 10km of running. As I got to the top of each painstaking climb I broke into a run which really gave my brain *and legs, something to think about. These sessions are the ones you remember come the race, as you trace your mind back to the pain you’ve endured and tell yourself I’ve done this before, I know how this feels. Flight or fIght sets in and you fight through.

If you dont feel the pain in training, there is no chance of managing it in the race. You need to know how to deal with it and overcome it. Overcoming adversity requires several visits to that place in your prior planning and preparation. One that has never Clawed his way out of the pain cave is one whom is merely poorly prepared. A lazy man is a foolish one. If you merely touch the surface of the “locker” you rely on physical prowess alone to get you through come race day, without the additional hardened mindset. The most important part when it comes to 5 days of torturous running.

Day 12. *Sunday, saw me go back to the hills. This time purely focusing on up and down. I climb vertically up and headed straight down, building purely on my leg strength and keeping a consistent stride. My only recovery was the quad crushing descent down. As I neared the end of the session i included 20 squats at the bottom before each climb and 30 jump lunges at the top, futher overloading the lower body and taking it to a dark place. An Unrelenting burn that did not shift.

This session mimicked the running on tired legs theme. A protocol one has to use in their training to experience what it feels like on a multi day event. The steep ascents were visualisation of the mammoth mountains I’ll be climbing in Wales and the pre and post fatiguing element of the explosive squats and jump lunges in between futhermore gave me that added benefit.

Day 13 saw me put all this hill training into a 14km tempo run. My splits previously on the hill weekend were slow and not a focus, but now I was eager to see how the mechanics I’ve focused on with the steep work, benefit me the flatter surfaces. Although my main focus has been ascending and descending with a slower and more methodical approach, I’m always trying to translate that into faster sessions at times. Always aspiring to be a multi faceted athlete. Plus it’s nice to feel your legs turging over at 190 steps per minute. Winner !!!

I felt fast, my breathing rate was calm and controlled, my stride was short and explosive and my splits were consistently around 4 mins 30 per km. Not fast by any means but as a “feel” and “feedback” session, it prevailed as a hugely positive experience. One that cements the programming I’ve written for myself.

After the bad experience of day 10 in the blog, today i felt elated and inspired to keep motivated and push harder. The small ups definitely outweigh the big downs and you need to hold onto the positive only. Setbacks are inevitable, it’s how you react. Flap at your peril.

This weekend sees me take on a 22 miler on gradual rolling terrain. Nothing taxing with a target of 4 hours. Race pace. Futher ingraining the stride length, breathing and analytical sides of the nutrition and post recovery principles. Being naive to your longer runs, focusing purely on time taken to complete, can be destructive and only encourage you to plateau. A great phrase and code to train by is…. Run slow to run fast. After all, running is a skill that requires learning and being smart. Education is essential. BASE building is the platform on which speed and specificity can be implemented.

Keep following the blog and see how I’m preparing my impending day 1 and 2 recce of the race. How I mark up my map and navigational strategy, Kit preparation and futher nutritional strategies I’m implementing. Now is crunch time in the prep with 80 days to go.

Day 10 saw me plan, prepare and unfortunately not deliver what I set out to do. Having planned for a 50 km run point to point across the downs I only managed 23. A shocking failure. Or is it.

Having not got a car due to the axel snapping in half, I needed to get on a bus to get to my starting destination. As I got off, the heavens opened and the bleak outlook looked like it was firmly set in for the rest of the day. I had a mere 3 hours of daylight left, so had my head torch in my kit, along with my other supplies. Prepared for any eventuality. My kit was dry bagged (obviously) and I had 4 litres of water on me.

As I set off my first mission was to conquer a 2 km steep ascent. The rain was shooting down, as I got to higher ground the howling winds and storm firmly hit me. I knew this was going to be very arduous, slow and a real slog. Luckily I had my pork sausage meat with me bagged up good to go, to help with the depleting morale. Experimental race nutrients. Better than fake foods like caffeine cubes.

17k of rolling, steep climbs and descents, eing bullied relentlessly by the storm, I stopped, took a moment and decided I wanted to foxtrott Oscar back to my house. This wasn’t as easy as I thought. I had to run to the train station, get a train, then walk a futher 3 miles home. So I got 4 ascents in up the beacon then headed 2 more miles to the train station. My objective wasn’t complete. I’d almost set myself up for failure. Tired starting off the run, deep down I knew running 32 miles would be a big ask.

But……..I still did something. Still ran 14 miles in character building conditions, alone, with noone pushing me, noone helping me. I still sacrificed my whole afternoon and still got valuable feedback. A word that’s rife in this blog. A word that has so much meaning. Good or bad, feedback gives us options. Options to get better. If I never bothered to go out in the first place; I’d never have found out more about myself. Thus not improve moving forward.

Next time you look at your strict running program, about to set off on the “long run” think to yourself…..I’m only human. What will be will be. All I can solely influence is the effort I put in. The consistent commitment is what’s needed and sooner or later the rewards will come. Take your time, constantly learn from the bad times (you’ll have plenty when preparing for a 200 mile race) , and don’t be afraid to “fail” because failing is a word used to me that doesn’t have a place in the English dictionary. To me it means trying, having a brief setback, learning and improving.