Saturday, January 12, 2013

Day 140- Assertiveness as Steadfastness as Breath (pt 4)

In this blog, I will be purifying and then redefining the word ‘Steadfastness’,
in my previous three posts ( read them here: 1, 2, 3), I have done so with the word ‘assertiveness’. I am
doing this so that I remove my relationship
to the word, the relationship
I have created with/towards the word, within which I would seek to
experience the word as an experience,
rather than actually living the word in my daily breath to breath application
of myself as Who I Am.
For example, if I have connected a positive
connotation to the word ‘steadfastness’, then I would chase that positive
feeling in an attempt to be steadfast, when steadfastness, by its very
definition, implies a dutiful consistency regardless of one’s emotional
or feeling state. So could I call myself steadfast if I only lived
steadfastness in bits and spurts when I was feeling ‘positive,’ ‘motivated,’ or
‘up to it’, wherein, as soon as I fall into a slump of some sort I fall back to
old habits? No, obviously not. That is not a living word; that is rather an
internal experience based on energy, labeled by a word, which is thus then
subject to energy with no consistency, and which can therefore not be trusted.
In order for ‘steadfast’ to become a living word as me, it is necessary to
learn how to live the word practically. It is necessary to practice being
consistent through all the ups and downs I may experience as I stabilize
myself, in order to prove to myself that I Am Steadfastness, consistently,
until I can trust myself as ‘steadfastness' in each breath, as breath.
First I will write self-forgiveness
statements to expose and debunk the definition I currently hold of the word
steadfast, so that I can redefine it from a clear starting point, in a
practical way that I can actually apply in my life.
I forgive myself for accepting
and allowing myself to connect the word ‘steadfast’ with a positive charge.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge
the word ‘steadfastness’ as good/positive/right.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfastness’ by charging the word ‘steadfastness’ with a positive
charge, and judging
the word ‘steadfastness’ as good/right/positive in separation of me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word
‘steadfastness’ with the image of an older ‘successful’ male.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word
‘steadfastness’ within the image of an older, successful male.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfastness’ and from the image of an older, ‘successful’ male, by
defining the word ‘steadfastness’ within the image of an older ‘successful’
male, in separation of myself.
Obviously, as a woman, I can never be an ‘older, successful male’. However, it
is my relationship to the image in my mind, as that which it represents to me,
that I am not allowing myself to be, by separating myself from it by creating
an image of it in my mind, as if only ‘older, successful males’ are able to
embody the word ‘steadfastness’- thus never actually accepting and allowing
myself to fully live the word myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word
steadfast to the word ‘sturdy’.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word
‘steadfastness’ within the word ‘sturdy;.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfastness’ and from the word ‘sturdy’ by defining the word
‘steadfastness’ within the word ‘sturdy’ in separation of me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word
‘steadfastness’ with the word ‘strong’.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word
‘steadfastness’ within the word ‘strong’.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfastness’ and from the word ‘strong’, by defining the word
‘steadfastness’ within the word ‘strong’ in separation of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word
steadfast with the word consistent,
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word steadfast
within the word consistent,
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfastness’ and from the word ‘consistent’ by defining the word
‘steadfastness’ within the word ‘consistent’ in separation of myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the word
‘steadfast’ to the image of a big tree..
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define the word
‘steadfast’ within the image of a big tree.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to separate myself from the
word ‘steadfast’ and from a big tree, by defining the word ‘steadfast’ within
the image of a big tree in separation f myself.

Dictionary definition:
Resolutely or dutifully firm and unwavering: "steadfast loyalty".
Sounding out the word::
inSTEAD of FASTNESS
New Definition:
Moving with the physical, resolutely and dutifully firm and unwavering breath
by breath self-movement with and as the physical. Not becoming swept away by
the racing mind, not participating in the energetic forces that occupy one and
pull one into the mad rush, the daily rush; the daily race that is the human
race; the rat race.
Remaining Here, present and aware, consistently and steadily, bringing self
back Here every time, no matter what. Letting go of the want/need/desire to get
‘there’ and to be ‘there’ instead of slowing down to the nearly standstill
eternity of Here.

1 comment:

About Me

Hi, my name is Kimberly Kline (nee Doubt). I stand for an Equal Money System- I stand for a dignified life for all beings and I will no longer accept or allow this system of human greed and self-interest that is causing suffering, starvation and abuse for the masses. Every 'solution' we have tried so far has failed- from the United Nations to the United Church. Individual self-change and leadership by example is where it's at. I humbly commit myself to this process and invite anyone who has respect for Life to join me and walk with me, beside me, as self-willed equals, until all are free from the global compromise humanity has created for itself.
Join Desteni for further discussions about world systems and humanity's place within them. Visit Desteni.org and Equalmoney.org.