The Happiness Project: Stress Less

Feeling stressed? Reclaim your cool on a crazy day.

The other morning, I was feeling rattled: I'd just returned from a business trip; my daughter's schedule had changed, so I had to rejigger my calendar; I'd discovered a mistake I'd made in something I'd written; and I had to finish a project with a short deadline. (I can't stand short deadlines!)

None of these issues was anything close to an emergency, but experiencing them all at once made me feel cranky and overwhelmed.

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To put myself in a better frame of mind, I decided to run through some of my easier tips for keeping calm. Whenever I have the wherewithal to try to soothe myself with these quick strategies instead of giving in to a bad mood, I'm struck by how much better I feel—without spending much time, energy, or money. Try them yourself.

1. Clean Up Your Space
If you take 10 minutes to clear off surfaces, empty the trash, and put each random item in its place, you can give yourself a big jolt of energy and good cheer. That's because for most people, outer order contributes to inner calm. A crowded coat closet, a sticky kitchen counter, an unmade bed—these are all trivial things, but small messes tend to weigh us down.

2. Let Yourself Be Silly
Although we often think that we act the way we do because of how we feel, research shows that to a great degree, we feel the way we do because of how we act.Goofing off—whether by making animal noises with your kids, juggling a few oranges, or trading knock-knock jokes with your friends—makes you feel more carefree.

In fact, simply smiling (even if you don't feel like it) can make a tremendous difference in your emotional state.

A University of Kansas study found that when people were given stressful tasks to accomplish, the ones told to give a genuine smile (or to hold a chopstick between their teeth, which simulates a smile) had lower heart rates than those who'd been told to maintain a neutral expression. One way to do something silly right away: Try jumping up and down a few times. It's childlike, it's energizing, and you'll feel a bit ridiculous in a good way…but it really works.

3. Give or Receive a Hug
Research has shown that hugging can help you feel less stressed and closer to the person you're embracing—and it may even help ease pain. In a study at Pennsylvania State University, students who gave five nonsexual hugs a day to as many different people as possible (one hug per person) for a month felt happier.

As for me, on my "rattled" morning I decided to find my husband, vented, and then got a hug. It helped (though next time I'll skip the venting).

4. Make Exercise a Must
I feel calmer when I work out; that's probably the main reason I do it. People who exercise are healthier, sleep better, and are less anxious and depressed. Plus, it's a great way to raise energy levels. Feeling tired is a reason to exercise, not a rationale for skipping it. And you don't have to go to a Zumba class or train for a marathon: a 15- or 20-minute walk will make a difference that lasts for hours. Added bonus: If you exercise outdoors, the sunlight will also help boost your mood and focus.