I don't know what to do?

Recommended Posts

I'm 28 and she is 21. She is my cousin's daughter. She lives in UK and i live in another country.

We first met when she was 13 and I was 20. On first sight i thought, "God, she is the most beautiful girl i ever seen in my life.". Even if i was attracted to her I decided to keep it to myself and continue being friendly with her. After a week she confessed she fell in love with me. At first I tried half heartedly to deter her, however I couldn't control my feelings for her and told her i love her too. We loved each other for a week and then it was time for her to go back to UK. I was heartbroken but was hoping to continue a long-distance relationship with her.

However after sometime I realized it was unhealthy especially for her. She was young and i felt bad for ruining her youth. She still had to go through puberty and i would have been more of a burden in her life. So i decided to let her go and she kind of felt the same. We both lived our lives and didn't contact each other anymore.

This year her parents told us they were coming back for the holidays. I knew i would see her again and decided to make like if that one week we loved each other never happened. I would behave with her like i behave with my other cousins and niece.

When i saw her again i was instantly attracted to her. I kept my distances but still behaved friendly with her. She cornered me alone and wanted to explain about what happened between us. She seemed to have moved on and wanted to know if i have moved on from our past. I assured her it was over, now we are older and we can better control ourselves. She agreed. After sometime i was surprised by myself that i was thinking about her all the time. Then she did it again. She told she fell in love with me again, she couldn't help it, she also told me she knew i still love her. And again we were starting to love each other. She kissed me on the lips (it was the first time) and i realized why i had never loved any of my ex-girlfriends, She had my heart all the time. She is the only one i could truly love. Why? Because i love her so much, my only desire for her is, her to be happy, even if it is with somebody else. I am ready to sacrifice my love for her, so that she can be happy.

For now she is happy with me. But she will return back to UK in a week. I know it will be hard for her after her departure.

I don't know what to do:

-Enjoy the week with her at the maximum without worrying about the future.

-Breakup with her but assure her i still love her but we can never be together.

-Move to UK to be close to her, however i might have a harder life there than what i live now. However she might want that as she doesn't want to leave UK.

-Tell our family about us. She might not want this as she doesn't want our families to break up.

I know that she is my true love, my only love. I had a lot of girlfriends but i never ever had this kind of feeling, this connection with anyone.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Roma is right. We HIGHLY discourage these fake wedding deals. Eventually, they WILL be found out, and you will have 4 times the drama. Your best option is for you to move to the UK where it IS legal, and, if she's so inclined as you, get married. Find your own roof, and your own way. I'm not real sure as to how you would have a harder life in the UK than you would pretty much anywhere in Asia. Since this sort of scheme seems to be the best idea you've seen, I'll assume you are Hindu Indian. That is where the vast majority of these schemes get concocted. Unless you are at the upper end of an upper caste, I would think whatever you do in the UK would be a step up. I would also assume if you are of an upper caste, even if much of your resources were denied you over this, you would still have some wherewithal to make a go of it in the UK.

Forgive me if I have wrongly assumed you are from India. My look-up does show you as NOT being in India, but, I seriously doubt you are where it shows you as being, as that is a known physical site of numerous proxies, and it isn't exactly in Asia. You aren't directly showing as being on a proxy, but then again, that's the idea, and it's also why I like the idea of running on a proxy. Bad for me to try to determine which country or State you are in, so as to properly advise you, but good on you for security reasons. Therefore, if I have wrongly assumed you are Hindu Indian, feel free to further enlighten me as to your country (I don't need anything anymore specific than that) and general religious/cultural background. The advice may change slightly, but, I have a feeling regardless of any of that being different, (say, you are Buddhist Chinese) I'm still going to want to see you in the UK. It is legally a LOT more friendly, and has considerably more legal protections for your physical safety too.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

I'm Hindu but do not live in Asia. In my country I would be classed as an upper middle class. However in UK the cost of living is very expensive compared to my country. So i am afraid of being downgraded to poverty in UK after I use up my savings of 90,000 pounds.