Tuesday, September 13, 2005

BREAKING NEWS, EVERYONE

SUP DAWG??

Ontario, 2005 -- The Oshawa community was shocked today when 50 Cents' Fanclub Founder Adam Goode - who's also in charge of Israel Gazette, a newspaper journal that targets the jewish youth - announced that he is renouncing his white name and that he is from this day forward adopting the name of his real father, Israeli immigrant Jacob Rosenstein.

The guys from David's Little Goyens, Adam's award winning break-dancing group, are supporting his decision 108%. The singer/dancer who received our staff in his house today, was glad to tell us the reason behind this life-changing decision.

"Y'all be dissing us jewish people", he explained, "so me and my homies decided to keep it real for all y'all crackers! he concluded, while tears streamed down his Chicago Bulls jersey.

When asked about his future projects, Adam explained that he's just about to leave for Israel, where he is to perform a series of lectures entitled "Xbox - sucking ass all over the world" and sign autographs for his latest hip hop album. "TUPAC, WHERE ART THOU", which is his third Tupac Tribute CD, is already a smash hit in Ethiopia and other African countries.

"You gotta keep it real, dog, you know what I'm saying?" said Goode, while re-arranging his doo-rag and doing the W sign with his right hand.