I Miss You Mom

by Terry
(El Paso)

My mother passed away on January 6, 2010. I still cannot believe that she is gone. She had been on dialysis for around 6 months. I remember taking her to the emergency room on December 13th because she had blisters in her mouth and throat and her eye was swollen. Never in my wildest thoughts did I think that she would never come home again.

A few days later, my mom called us in one at a time and said her goodbyes. I still had no idea what was happening. I was completely unprepared to hear the doctors tell me that my mother had acute leukemia. Lily, that is my mother's name, wanted me to make the decision as to whether she would receive chemo or immunotherapy. After discussing it with my brothers and the rest of my family I decided on immunotherapy.

She and I shared many happy visits. One in particular was the Sunday before she was to start her immunotherapy. We talked, laughed, cried, and held each other. I told her that I wasn't ready for her to go and she calmly explained to me that it was her time. My mother accepted what was coming with such courage and she taught me so much both in life and in her death.

She went into a coma for 6 days (I stopped the therapy after 2 days) and woke up 2 days before my birthday. She hugged me and told me that she loved me with all of her heart on my birthday and then slipped back into a coma later that night. She never came out of the coma.

After 7 days of trying everything we could, I brought her home with me and she passed away the very next morning. My mother has always lived with me, my husband and my children and I guess she was waiting to come home.