No, that is incorrect. Harvard University is located in the city of Boston. In fact, Harvard is the capital of Boston. “Cambridge” is a French word meaning, “It’s Boston, everybody.” Thus, your complaint is invalid and embarrassing for you.

This is the perfect thing to do on a hungover Sunday night when nothing makes any sense anyway. I completed the mission and along the way unconcerned the Super Clicker award (or does everyone get that?) but it was three minutes ago and I can't remember what decision I took to make it. Murdering the Deans I think? i'm also now worried about how much i offend God because i think about my butt on Sundays sometimesposted by billiebee at 10:48 AM on November 8, 2015 [5 favorites]

it's like Porpentine's ultra business tycoon iii except without the fourth wall breaking point about loneliness, distraction, and domestic strife but instead is just a random satire of choose-ur-own-adventures

“I seat 38,000 people and I’m fucking a stranger!” screams Fenway Park as you continue to do your genitals to this historic stadium, where legends like Pedro Martinez and Wade Boggs achieved baseball greatness.

“If mutiny were a car, I would crawl inside of it to die!” bellows a man wearing a T-shirt that says “I Love To Forcibly Wrest Control Of The Ship Away From My Captain And All I Got Was This Stupid T-Shirt.”

Bus God is a God of Old Testament Wrath. I would think a God raised on the choirs of Mass Transit would be a little more forgiving.

On the other hand, given the way people behave, I image buses might strike motorists and pedestrians alike down with fire if that option were available.posted by GenjiandProust at 1:48 PM on November 8, 2015

The Red Dust Of Harmony Gulch: A Tale Of The Wild West
Your horse’s name is Dr. Nathaniel Bedlam, M.D. (“Dr. Nate” for short). His mother was named Linda: The Horse Who Forgave Judas, and his father was named Professor Ronald Horse, Ph.D. His entire lineage is a who’s who of world-famous equestrian titans.

Bad science happened to Dr. Nathaniel Bedlam when he was a horse puppy and now he can say a handful of English words. His grammar is terrible because of his brain, but it’s still pretty amazing for a horse.

“We have done a delicious memory as more if many and it’s several. And plus forever!” Dr. Nathaniel Bedlam says. His voice is kind and full of friendship.

He can actually be very eloquent when he wants to be, but mostly he is stoic and only speaks occasionally, just like the taciturn, blood-red rocks of the unforgiving Wild West.posted by Iridic at 2:40 PM on November 8, 2015 [7 favorites]

I ended up getting taking shelter from a rainstorm with a young debutante engaged to marry a man she doesn't love.posted by Flashman at 3:20 PM on November 8, 2015 [7 favorites]

Man watching Money Creature gets old fastposted by Hoopo at 3:24 PM on November 8, 2015

The other day a guy comes up to me an says "The thing about life is you can't have any regrets" an I says "what about the gorilla" an he says "don't regret the gorilla" an I says "what about the leprechauns then" an he says "don't regret them neither" an I says "well what about the muskox or the obelisk or the radish king" an he goes "nope nope nope" an I'm gettin into this now an I says "not even the terrible time tortoise" an he says "I loved the terrible time tortoise" an I figure this guy is the smartest guy ever an we're dancin jigs an singin songs an he gets eaten by a gorilla. The gorilla, she always remembers.

There was a point to this story and one day I will remember what it is and one day when you come back to read it it will be here again.

Ah! Harvard University! The special jail where people with too much math are imprisoned forever and forced to teach each other about poems. It is one of the cruelest and most prestigious prisons, not just in Boston, but in the entire state of Marpuss.

The letter from the mayor reminds me of the robocalls we get in Somerville, sometimes from the mayor (Joe Curtatone) about snow emergencies and stuff. They go to ignignokt's Google Voice number, and get badly transcribed into messages from "Joker Tony" or "Mary Joe Credit Twenty" from the "city of Summer Bell." I am almost certain they mention Bus God. So, yeah, this a pretty accurate depiction of Boston and the creator of this clearly did their research.posted by Metroid Baby at 4:02 AM on November 9, 2015 [3 favorites]

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