6.08.2010

It's that time of year again. Time to pack up the kids into the station wagon (or minivan for you yuppies) and set out on the open road for a long adventure, replete with the sounds of summer: "Are we there yet?" "He's touching me!" and the ever popular "I have to pee." This year, instead of stopping at questionably clean diners in the middle of nowhere, why not try cooking out with the family? This handy guide will make it a breeze to cook just about anywhere! Just think -- not only are you saving money by not having to tip that creepy waitress with the two teeth and the vericose veins mimicking an interstate highway map, but you'll be saving the world by using an already-existing heat source to cook your cuisine.

And for those of you who prefer to have even less impact on the environment, you can make sure you leave no morsel along the side of the road. Accidentally hit a skunk while reaching into the back seat to change the DVD? No problem! Throw it in the cooler and then throw it on your car engine when it's time for dinner!

And for those of you who, like me, prefer to travel on two wheels instead of four, there's the age-old question of what to do with all the bugs that get caught in your teeth. This book answers that question. I know for a fact that a Harley engine gets hot enough to fry an egg on (bump the pipes one time with a bare leg and you'll never question that again!), so you don't even need a car for this cuisine!

6.03.2010

I'm not sure if they hired a third rate cover artist or if this is intentionally not supposed to look like William Shatner -- Shatner's "appearance" in Season One of Family Guy looked more like him than this! -- but that's supposed to be everyone's favorite overacting starship captain. From Amazon:

It's Shatner VS Shatners! William Shatner? William Shatner. WILLIAM SHATNER!!! It's the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner. Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and - of course - William Shatner! No costumed con-goer will be spared in their wave of destruction, no redshirt will make it out alive, and not even the Klingons will be able to stand up to a deranged Captain Kirk with a lightsaber. But these Shatner-clones are about to learn a hard lesson...that the real William Shatner doesn't take crap from anybody. Not even himself. It's Shatnertastic!

6.02.2010

So is this guy cool because he is super-PC and has friends from both genders and a plethora of racial groups? Or is it because of his awesome haircut? Or is it because he's nice to the kid in the Bill Cosby sweater? No matter. I think he needs more practice.

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Just what, exactly, is Judge a Book by its Cover?

I worked in a public library. I saw literally thousands of books every week; the good, the bad, and the truly hideous. These are the covers from the latter category. Joining me (Maughta) is the ever-popular pinch hitter (and handy husband) DocTurtle.

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