I feel a little proud that we've managed to keep this from you for so long, but sometimes people talk to other people. It's ok, sit down if you have to. And in the course of talking to one another, sometimes they "gossip" and "word gets around."

Also, I can't figure out if OP.title is in reference to "she had been quietly let go from two other jobs", "Coaches! Those goddamn masturbating tattletales", or "this person will probably be somewhat distracting and difficult to explain to middle-schoolers".

I read the linked report, and am entertained to find that she actually appeared in a film in which she had sex with the pizza delivery guy, extra sausage and all. I had no idea that was an actual porn genre, rather than a porn-related joke.

My intuitions on what kind of porn would be problematic for a teacher at all differ from Ogged's. That is, I'm not sure what to do about it (what I want to say is that whoever's looking up porn online isn't seeing anything they didn't look for, and having had a prior, legal, job shouldn't bar anyone from working as a teacher. But I can see how it might be difficult), but I'd think the line where it'd be an issue would be where she appeared naked in anything intended to be erotically stimulating. Drawing a line, as Ogged seems to be, between the sort of films she was in and milder-hardcore seems like the kind of thing that wouldn't make much of a difference to school-age kids.

The findings of fact and conclusions of law are nicely detailed. Much hinges on when "No Cum Dodging Allowed 7" and "Eat My Black Meat 4" were filmed. Also, Exhibit 30:

Respondent engaging in anal sex, expelling the semen from her rectum into a glass and then drinking the expelled semen from the glass ("Anal Consumption";Exhibit 30).

I guess it should be legally permissible to fire her as a teacher, mostly because it sounds as if she kept on lying about a bunch of things. But I still feel bad for her and wish they'd let her keep her job.

it'd be an issue would be where she appeared naked in anything intended to be erotically stimulating

Does "appeared naked" play a meaningful role in your analysis? It seems like it would be raise just about as much of whatever issues you are worried about being raised if she appeared in anything intended to be erotically stimulating, naked or not. What issues get raised in a video that exposes her breasts, that don't get raised in a video where she's "just" scantily clad, posed erotically and talking dirty to the camera?

I didn't even see the video described in 15! My intuition, and I could be way wrong, is that beyond the initial tittering, you can say to a kid, "This is sex. People enjoy it, and some people enjoy watching it," but that even open parents will only feel comfortable saying that if the sex is basically anodyne.

It's also possible that I'm way overestimating how reasonable parents and kids can be, and the only thing that matters is that she can only ever be "the teacher who did porn."

In my paradise of rationality, it would be much worse for middle a schoolers if she did porn in the same clothes she teaches in. Named, you explain "clothes on, you think about algebra, clothes off, you think about sex."

Administrators scrambled to find out if it was her, even trying to view video on school computers to no avail; adult-content filters wouldn't let them. But soon individuals, including a teacher, used smartphones to view Halas in action.

A couple of years ago some kids at the upper school found apparently somewhat outré photos of himself posted online by the headmaster. I never saw them but they reportedly documented an interest in somewhat niche s*xual interests and were posted to further meeting up with similarly inclined consenting adults. A number of parents tried to make a big to do about it. The headmaster agreed to make the photos more private but otherwise refused to be shamed and as he was employed by a foreign government there wasn't much the gossips could do about it except perhaps have to have conversations with their children about minding their own business. He served the rest of his term and then went back to the hexagon and now there is another headmaster.

Some of the sentences above are torturously badly constructed but I'm on a phone as per usual so too much bother to fix.

Don't know for sure, perhaps b*ndage, s/m? Something along those lines? Those inclined to go on about didn't find me very receptive. Was everyone involved a consenting adult? They never claimed otherwise so I said wasn't any of my business. They found others to natter on at.

I'd probably put the line somewhere between LB's and ogged's: nudity OK, even full frontal; anything with penetration is probably disqualifyingly distracting. Drinking anal secretions? I might refuse to sell you a cake.

I'm fine with doing porn being a disqualifier for teaching primary education. Teachers have to interact with kids being raised by parents with all manner of values. That seems to me to require a higher standard of blandness in one's personal life than would be the case for a firefighter, for example.

58: The plural of anecdote isn't data blah blah, but the primary teachers I've known personally in the UK and in international schools have tended to be less bland on average than the general population, when considered in terms of drinking and carousing. Nurses, too. The pet theory that goes with my pet dataset is that maybe it's something involving "caring professions".

Separately, I also completely disgree that a job that involves interacting with people with different values requires the person to be bland outside of work (spacially or temporally). I think that implicitly accepts the whole neoliberal project of smashing down the barriers between personal and professional life and turning us all into self-policing worker bees with carefully curated facebook pages.

60: which professions are more bland than average, would you say?
I don't think it's that nurses are more wild and crazy than the average, but just that one has a preconception that they are going to be extremely not wild and crazy. So they're wilder than you expect.

60 aligns with my experience, but it's also been my experience that teachers have have to... not hide their drinking and carousing, exactly, but not be too public about it, either. I've known more than one teacher who has caught grief from parents and school administrators for "inappropriate" Facebook posts, usually supposedly out of concern for how seeing such things might impact the children.

Not totally off-topic in a thread about porn, an update to my ATM: I asked the hostess whether the goal was funny, jokey gifts or earnest gifts, and she shrugged. "Anything you want." I followed J, Robot's suggestion of the aphrodisiac cookbook and paired it with a frilly apron but also got a 10" neon pink veiny dildo per Smearcase. All are sitting on the kitchen counter waiting to be wrapped. Subsequent party requirements involve wearing black (I had to go shopping for this) and bringing a drink or a snack. This party is too much work. Next time I'll just decline and drink in the comfort of my own home and buy myself presents sex toys.

Well the note said, "Ms. Halas, we saw you weren't wearing any dress a t'all
It's reported you've been drinkin' cum and runnin' round with men and goin' wild.
And we don't believe you oughta be a teachin' our little girls this way."
And it was signed by the secretary of the Oxnard PTA.

...

Well, there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there, and seven times he's texted askin' to share that drink.
And Mrs. Taylor seems to use a lotta ice for things you'd surely never think
And Mr. Baker and his secretary had a movie of their own.
And shouldn't widow Jones be told to close her windows after watching all that horsey porn

And then you have the nerve to tell me, you think that as a teacher I'm not fit.
Well I'm here to tell you that you're all just the target demo for the San Fernando Valley set.

Bear Run -- on the flanks of Laurel Ridge. Bear Run is the stream flows through Fallingwater; this is along the upstream part of that watershed. Just a day hike; but per my earlier recommendation, a good place for a nice little backpack. But one where you lollygag in a nice place, rather than exorcise inner demons by pushing your limits. (Not that that is what you are doing...)

82 is a question I've spent many hours researching. The answer is yes though you'll pay a Rockford premium, plus the sad truth is that it wasn't a great car to begin with except in the looks department. There was someone selling a 70s gold firebird shell modified with a modern engine, brakes, etc, (I forget exactly from where) but it was over $100,000.

Firebirds and Camaros always seemed to me more common in Northwestern Indiana than anywhere else I went, when I drove more decades ago. Especially in the late seventies and early eighties, you often saw them with obvious homemade body repairs, and the sound and visible features of the exhaust meant the engines had received modification.

It's true that by the mid-seventies performance was off a lot from what it had been circa 1970, so that people who wanted performance on the cheap had to do it themselves.

Those old Sprinsteenish cars—N. Indiana functions as NJ does in the east in our regional culture—are gone, but the region is still the best place to see a muscle car lovingly and no doubt expensively restored to this day.

My household's espresso/cappuccino machine died yesterday. Now, this is not a terrible problem for me -- I don't fret over that -- but my housemate's coffee-drinking is pretty much exclusively in the form of espresso/cappuccino/latte. Our recently expired machine had lasted nigh on 15 years, so you know, it was a workhorse.

Secondly: the regular drip coffee-maker, an utterly cheap-ass thing, died about a year ago. I've just been making coffee by hand, as it were: in a press-pot, or with a cone filter over a pot, pouring boiling water over the grounds, or in a percolator on the stove.

As the espresso machine has now died, I had the bright idea that perhaps the thing to do was to get one of those coffee + espresso combo machine thingies.

It turns out that reviews of such things do not look good. Does anyone have a contrary view? I'm now thinking that, as with stereo components, it's best to acquire the things in, well, separate components.

And Bella: never heard of it. But okay, it looks almost exactly like the old one, and I think we're conservative that way.

Meanwhile, Bernie-mentum! I don't know what to make of the pushback. Everyone seems very frightened that Sanders might actually gain some traction, thereby damaging Clinton. But of course I don't like Clinton that much. I'm not adding value on this one.

Holy crap! This thread has converged on a topic that, I swear to god, arose unbidden* in my mind earlier today: is there a sub-subgenre of porn involving artsy, barista-style cumshots? Rule 34 says there must be, and yet it seems so implausible (and technically challenging).

I would be astounded if a combo espresso/drip coffee maker were anything other than a piece of crap. Drip coffee just isn't that complicated: grind coffee add hot water. A filter cone or a French press is the right way to go. If you're serious about espresso (I'm not), buy a serious espresso machine.

||I'm at this end-of-the week for my kid's camp. It's some bay-area-based chain of camps and OMG. "Let's hear it for all our young visionairies!" They watched a TED talk together. Suggested activities for the "visionairies" to keep their "information library" updated after camp ends are to watch more TED talks and attend a "Maker's Fair." Also they did what sounds to me like a management consulting interview question at the start of camp every day. Terrible swift sword of the Lord's vengeance, WHERE ARE YOU?|>

We just went to the mini performance after 2 weeks of dance intensive and zowie the kid has shattered the ballet box, hips are definitively operating in a different plane from rest of body. A scant 7.5 hours of Bollywood did the trick! Excellent.

you guys I love you sooooo much, and I'm not saying that because I'm drunk! I am stuck in bali by myself which is in no way pitiable, but I am bored and antsy, and currently lying outside under a towel (thus not being devoured, also mosquitoes peak at dusk and then kind of go away/are sated with the blood of the innocent.) I can swim naked which is a billion times better than swimming in a bathing suit, but the tiny pool is somehow cold as fuck, I don't even know how. lack of sun due to surrounding high walls, I guess. in any case I was lying here smoking a clove cigarette and listening to depressing music on amazing headphones, but this thread was fucking hilarious and restored my faith in humanity.

I haven't taken up smoking just as everyone else in the family is quitting/dying of lung cancer (my moms doing well, actually), rather, I occasionally feel the need for a minor vice and smoke one djarum a day while I'm in indo. why I'm setting out to finish this pack I couldn't tell you. to improve my asthma and panic attacks? this thread is hilarious and jubilating, and only the sad/thoughtful fact that my husband put the music on my phone prevents me from listening to the rockford files theme song.

talking shit about my brother at Xmas made me retreat for a while but this is beautiful. on the whole I think the swirly-leaf pattern in the crema would be simplest to make; perhaps ogged will enter yet more thoroughly into his investigative role?

Well I'm stuck in my apartment alone which is somewhat pitiable because I had plans to drive out to the desert today with a fellow American cow-orker to check out this cool Richard Serra installation in the middle of nowhere but said compatriot fell ill. I could get naked but that would be just weird. Speaking of smoking I had an (overpriced) shisha at an uber posh hotel the other night where there was a Ramadan suhoor for us librarians. There was pretty good classical Arabic music and the food was amazing. And free. Why I paid about $25 for a shisha I don't know but at least wasn't craving nicotine the next day.

I smoked or used stuff from when I was 18 or so until I was close to 40. I quit fairly often, sometimes for up to six months or so, but never for long enough that I was safe from cravings if I wasn't on the patch or gum.

In a few weeks I will be boarding a sailing ship and weighing anchor for a remote and little-known island inhabited by dragons. Some people talk about escaping to a fantasy world but I'm actually doing it.

I have a bleg for alameida. I am friends with a couple in my program, and the husband just got a job in Narnia. The wife is moving with him while finishing her dissertation, and she is wondering what there is for her to do in Narnia as an academic expat who isn't formally employed and doesn't have any strong prior connections to the region.

Streaming options in this country SUCK! I can't watch anything that's not on YouTube (and a bunch of stuff there is blocked). I need to figure something out. I'd like to see the last four or so episodes of the recent season of Orphan Black at least.

I did throw one party with a friend for maybe 100 people where we bought like 5 cartons of cigarettes and poured out all the packs into a bowl. the pleasure derived was disproportionate to the cost.

ajay: I am jealous!

buttercup: I am happy to advise. there are quite a few new joint partnerships between the local schools and overseas ones. you could email me at realfirstname.reallastname@gmail.com? I am also happy to meet new people and will take her/them out.

So, speaking of anal consumption porn, which we're not but we were earlier in the thread, I just walked into my living room to find my laughing 8 year old on his hands and knees with his underwear around his ankles, his butt up in the air, and the dog enthusiastically licking his asshole. I'm really not sure how to parent appropriately in this situation. Advice welcome.

Why is it that there are people who feel concerned enough to do something - but all that something is is telling me, thinking that I'll act.

Specifically, one of my godmothers was worried, because my mother was talking about moving to Maine and taking my dysfunctional, mentally ill sister with her. My sister was yelling and then took the phone away from my mother.

She thought that my father - who has not listened to anything I say - might listen to my godfather and she asked if I had/would call him. She dislikes my godfather, but if she thinks it's important/ would be useful, she could call instead of trying to make me feel like I was supposed to do it.