With A Rebel Yell

Summary:
AU. Chicago, 1928. Edward Cullen is living his life of rebellion, feeding only off criminals. Then, he stumbles across someone seemingly innocent who appeals to him in ways that could force him to reveal his secret and scare away the girl he's grown to love.

9. AGONY

James wasted no time in running back into the house that he had only just vacated to demand Bella's attention, and to kill me. Only to end up nearly killing Bella herself.

I looked up in time to see the curtains snap shut – he’d no doubt told them of the monster that had attacked his only child.

I rolled my eyes at his blatant stupidity before I realised that I was left alone with my beautiful, dying Bella, the scent of her blood potent around me.

My decision was still split. I couldn't decide to be incredibly selfish and keep her, or to leave her die like she should have had she not met me.

Then again, if Bella had not met me - had I not returned - she wouldn't be lying, bleeding, right now.

Her lips moved silently, the words clearly recognisable.

“Love … you.”

Those two words made up my mind.

So, with care not to breathe lest I give into temptation, I leaned over Bella’s limp, pale body and bit, gently, hating myself for the agony I was about to put both of us through.

Her blood tasted a thousand times better than it smelled, the urge to continue was consuming me - my every thought and action - but, somehow, I pulled away, resisted the siren of her blood.

Glancing around me, I realised that we had to get away.

Bella couldn’t make the transition on the street.

There was only one place I could think of taking her and I didn’t think twice before picking her up and running there.

To Carlisle and Esme – I knew they’d help me.

Day One

I thought I’d be strong enough to handle it. I remembered all too clearly the agonising pain that it took to become a vampire – the pain it felt to lose your soul.

I knew what to expect.

But, somehow, every cry that came from Bella’s mouth – no matter how soft – that I heard and in which her pain was evident, it about killed me.

Occasionally, her body would convulse as well.

That was worse to endure.

Carlisle had had to restrain me more than once to stop me from wrapping my arms around her to comfort her. It wouldn’t help and we weren’t sure if it would hinder the process or not.

We couldn’t take that chance.

So I was forced to watch her body thrash in pain, listen to her cry in agony …

But it was for my own selfish gain – I deserved to suffer.

Day Two

I didn’t account for the smell of her blood to disappear.

I thought that that would follow her over into vampirism, at least. As it was, with every hour that passed, the scent of her blood grew fainter as more and more of her blood was replaced with my venom.

I remember having to leave the room when Carlisle had stitched up her stomach wound – the temptation had been too much.

I also remember feeling incredibly, irrationally jealous of Carlisle, and the fact that he had spent more time with Bella than I during this stage.

He calmed me down, of course. I had read his thoughts to check his sincerity, however. Just to be on the safe side.

Bella will never again blush beautifully, her blood will never again sing for me.

Her face paled further than it did when she was alive.

But my Bella would always be beautiful.

I would always love her.

Day Three

The convulsions grew less and less; her shouts and cries of pain became whimpers.

Bella was beginning to wake up.

Her skin was a beautiful pale white, so similar to my own. It was cool to the touch, I noticed as I pulled her hand into my own.

I hoped she didn’t hate me.

Her eyes opened, the once brown irises had blackened with hunger, but they looked up at me and widened with recognition.

“Edward?” Her voice, always musical to me, became as soft as chimes and as appealing as a mermaid’s song.

“It’s me, darling.” I whispered. “I’m here.”

“Edward,” she whimpered. “I’m hungry.”

“I know, Bella,” I ran a hand over her cheek and she closed her eyes at the sensation. “I’ll take you out hunting soon.”

Carlisle and Esme entered the room we were in then. Bella looked up quickly and buried her face in my chest at the strangers' presence.

The action pulled at her stomach wound, causing her to wince in pain.

“It’s okay, Bella,” I explained. “This is Dr. Carlisle Cullen, he made me, and his, well, wife, for lack of a better term, Esme.”

She looked up at them hesitantly and kept a hand on her stomach, my bite mark standing out against her skin.

Silently, Bella waved at them and I smiled at her effort.

She had her work cut out for her, these next years would be hard … painfully so.

But still, she made an effort, and you had to admire her for that.

“I love you, Bella.” The words escaped me without a thought and her instinctive response was just as heartfelt.