Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Sometimes, life imitates...life?

So, I had a job interview today. For my job.

I generally try to avoid talking about my "real life" on the blog, but I think it's pertinent.

Anyway, I found out just a little while ago that I was going to have to re-apply for my current job. In truth, I'd rather NOT stay in this job, and my fingers are crossed that another potential job pans out, but hey, whatever.

I had the interview, which went well. I mean, we're not talking about hypothetical situations. I know what works and what doesn't work there. And then I got a call telling me that I'd have a call-back...at which time I was told what sorts of things I should say if I want to keep my job.

And frankly, I HATE that shit. I hate being told what to do. I really, really hate it. I know what needs to be said! I know what's right for me.

What does this have to do with my blog? I think this is part of why I don't diet well...and why even Intuitive Eating fails me sometimes. I do NOT do well with rigid rules and mandates. I don't like being told, in essence, that I can't be trusted to do the right thing.

I've had about three days of struggling. I know I'm not hungry, but I eat. And every time, I sort of feel like I'm thumbing my nose at Geneen Roth ("Screw you, lady! I'll eat what I want!"). Even though overeating doesn't make me feel good.

About Me

I'd had enough of censoring my thoughts and feelings by eating or not eating, so it was time to find out what eating, thoughts, and feelings actually were. So, here I am.
In the real world, I am a generally disgruntled, but somehow still idealistic, music educator. I am also navigating through the beginnings of a long divorce from my roommate, while trying to parent a child with Asperger's Syndrome. Crazy, but true.