That's it, I'm taking my act on the road. We're gonna do the Eastern Mediterranean. I'm sick of the Senate, the media, the rumors, the investigations, the truth. This place can burn for all I care.

People won't let that whole "Burning of Rome" thing go. I tell you I had nothing to do with it. It's all fake rumors. I don't care what Juvenal writes in his little satires, he's just not funny anymore - so sad!

My people has nothing to do with those fires, this is a witch hunt. No one in this Empire's history has ever been persecuted like I have. They should quit wasting their time and go see a show. I hear there's a Christians-Liions game today. I got my money on the Lions.

I am the greatest ever, this tour is going to be huge. I love the crowds and they love me. So forget that stupid Senate and their "investigations" Real Rome knows I can do know wrong. Gods, there are times I swear I'd kill my own mother to get some peace around here.

Tiberius

I hear you about the Senate. Now their looking into my finances. They seem to think there's something wrong with all those years I vacation on Capri with taxpayer money. Like I need to be in Rome. Where I am, there's Rome. What's gonna happen while I'm gone? Like Sejanus is gonna take over.
By the way, any Patricians looking for a great vacation, we got awesome views on Capri. It's beautiful and luxurious, a really great time at a really great place. Just sayin'.

Caesar

No kidding about that Senate. Sometimes you just gotta cross that Rubicon and drain the swamp. They can be real backstabbers.

Caligula

I swear that Senate is so bad I could make a horse a senator and no one would notice. The media, that's a different story. Their always on with these wild rumors "Torture" "Murder" "Incest" "Not invading Britain". The real story is who's leaking these things. Not that their true, but these leaks have got to stop. If Seutonis had kept his mouth shut I could have just told Foxus to write an account of the invasion of Britain. I swear 40% of this empire would have believed me.

Commodus

Being Emperor is hard, I much prefer being an entertainer. I can put on a good show. My shows are huge. Why should I spent my time fighting our enemies, we can just build a wall. As to the rumors about me and my sister, they're untrue. But she is hot, if she wasn't my sister I'd date her. I'm the best emperor ever, and I am not a megalomaniac. This criticism is the typical insider political way of Rome. We should start over, maybe begin again by naming the city after me.

Claudius

Anyone miss me yet? The one who actually conquered Britain? The press never gave me a fair shake either, Juvenal is a nasty man. But there were no real scandals and we made great progress during my term.

Nero

Oh go suck on a mushroom Claudius. You're the kind of pointy-headed intellectual we don't need. "Literate" "Law Maker" "Just" "Intelligent" "Actually Invaded Britain". What this Empire needs is a really good show. And I'm gonna give it to them.

Nero Claudius Casesar Augustus Germanicus

Age: 30

Education: I read, I'm just not some pointy headed intellectual like Claudius