The League of Tana Tea Drinkers

Our mission is to acknowledge, foster, and support thoughtful, articulate, and creative blogs built on an appreciation of the horror and sci-horror genres.

Horror bloggers are a unique group of devoted fans and professionals, from all walks of life, who keep the genre, in all its permutations and media outlets, alive and kicking. Often spending long hours to keep their blogs informative and fun, horror bloggers share their unique mix of personality, culture and knowledge freely to fans of a genre difficult to describe, and fun to fear.

We honor exemplary horror blogs with our own special insignia: one that signifies the heights to which we aspire, and the code of excellence we follow to promote horror in all its wonderfully frightening forms, from classic to contemporary, from philosophical to schlockical.

The League of Tana Tea Drinkers are bloggers who toil away the extra midnight hour to present the best in horror blogging to reach the heights of horrifying excellence. We know what rapture it is to sip tana tea in the full moon light, and feel the thrill of walking the dark passageways in cinema and literature, searching for the unusual, the terrifying, and the monstrous. For the fun of it.

Keep watching the skies, and reading the horror. LOTT D is coming for you!

...Think of a GWAR video, only without the showmanship, musical proficiency, and insightful social commentary. Think of a Troma movie without the high production values and delightfully cosmopolitan sense of humor. Think of all those dead baby jokes you and your friends used to tell in junior high, but without the rapier wit. Got it? Formed a picture of that movie in your head?

...the first thing one notices is that this film is dark. i don’t mean se7en dark, like in terms of “mood.” i’m talking doom3 dark without the flashlight mod kind of dark. this is what happens when you let the director be his own dp… (pun alert) in light of this, i’ve taken the liberty of brightening up the screenshots so you can actually make out what’s going on.

...Disclaimer: The opinions reflected in this article are mine and mine alone and don't reflect the opinions of the fine, upstanding, and thoroughly delightful gentle people at "Ultra Violent Magazine." Even though those bastards sent me this movie and expected me to review it for their publication without any appropriate warning.

...Left in Darkness is a varicose mess playing with half-realized ideas that its makers do not seem to grasp at all. Unsurprisingly, it's produced by Stephen J. Cannell, who has created a small industry out of turgid, pseudo-intellectual horror films. So few films make me speechless in their awfulness, but this one wins that extremely dubious distinction.

...Part of the charm of watching Turkish knock-offs is that they rarely, if ever, come subtitled. Watching them, you have no idea what is happening. You’re often left with the vaguest notion that familiar characters from better known Hollywood movies are doing very strange things for mysterious reasons and that’s alright. However, I managed to find a subtitled copy of Seytan, better known to the west as TurkishExorcist, and found that the subtitles don’t clear anything up.

...There are bad movies. There are stupid movies. There are shitty movies. There are awful movies. And there is Philippe Martinez’s THE CHAOS EXPERIMENT, which is an awful shitty, awful stupid, awful bad movie. And I’d say that’s an awful shame because it has Eric Roberts, Armand Assante and Val Kilmer in it, but that would be a lie. It’s not a shame.

...When I popped the DVD in, I was already ready for a terrible movie, and thenwhen the first five minutes came rolling by with a woman dancing topless during the opening credits, along with bad 90s metal, I was totally bored. Another 5 minutes brings another woman who dances while annoyingly bad CGI effects talk gibberish about an alien sending a vampire down to Earth. I'd had almost enough of the softcore porn environment, so luckily we moved on to the real story.

...Around two-thirds into Murder-Set-Pieces I looked at my watch. I don't do that often when watching a film. In this case, though, I looked at it twice. I really wanted to get it over with, and, unlike some reviewers less meticulous (or masochistic) than me, I always watch the whole movie just to make sure I don't miss anything that remotely resembles art, or scares, or anything that stands out as a memorable horror-moment. I was disappointed that I didn't find anything like that here.