14 July, 2013

At Bic, we understand the different needs of a woman. That’s why engineers at the Bic Institute have developed a range of products especially for women.

These products feature the same familiar Bic shape, the same quality Bic ink and the ball point we all know and love, but presented in a gentler coloured tube, perfectly suited for dotting an i with a heart.

Finally, a pen for women from a company that understands women. We know you’ll love new Bic Cristal for Her, because no-one knows women like Bic.

The first half, to be called Murdoch, will become the head of News Corp and all its subsidiaries and continue the former Rupert Murdoch’s hobby as international kingmaker. The second half, to be named Rupert, will fill the role of the doddery, forgetful, but kind of lovable old man and will be responsible for schmoozing celebrities, liaising with law enforcement and appearing before government enquiries.

When asked about the unconventional split, the newly renamed Murdoch said, “It’s not new. It’s been done before. Prince was the first to try it back in the 90s. The problem with that was that he only had one name in the first place so he had to use that love symbol thingy. That was never going to work, if only because my printers weren’t going to retool for that little pissant.”

However, the singularly named Murdoch added, “The idea of trying to wriggle out of his responsibilities by claiming the bloke who signed the contract didn’t exist any more was pure bloody genius though. It might not have worked for him, but we reckon we’ve got the idea perfected now.”

When asked for comment, the segment of the former Rupert Murdoch now named Rupert stated, “Ducks. Lots of ducks. Pretty ducks on a pond. James? Are you there James? Where’s me cocoa?”

Shares in News Ltd companies rose after the news that Rupert would be assisting police with their ongoing enquiries.

About Me

Computer tutor, IT handyman, presenter of Strawberry Fields Radio, occasional songwriter and musician, and writer of some notes.
Here you will find my thoughts on music, politics, music DVDs and life in general.
I read the comments.
By the way, if anyone is wondering, since it’s an abbreviation of web-log, ’blog should be spelt with an apostrophe, like ’phone.