How to be the life and soul of the party

Some people are naturally shy and others find big social events uncomfortable but the good news is that, to some extent, everyone is a bit nervous when they go to a party, even those who appear extremely confident. Here are some practical things you can do to make your experience of parties much more enjoyable.

1. Look your best
Sometimes people go over the top when getting ready for a date because they lack confidence in their own attractiveness. Nothing is more attractive than a zest and enthusiasm for life but having your nails done, a nice hairdo or a special outfit can all help you feel good about yourself. Enhance your assets and then let your inner beauty shine through. Remember sexy is an attitude not a costume.

2. Concentrate on others
The best way to enjoy yourself is to get others to enjoy themselves. Instead of thinking ‘I hope I have a good time’ try ‘I want everyone to enjoy themselves’. Your contribution is not insignificant in making this happen.

3. Bring a little magic
It’s much easier to learn magic tricks than it is to learn to play an instrument or be a confident joke teller. If you learn some magic tricks you could have your audience spell-bound, confused, charmed and mesmerised all at the same time. Men will want to know your secrets and women will be in awe. You can look online and learn from videos on Youtube or get a book and teach yourself. The great thing about this is it encourages everyone else to show any tricks they can do too.

4. Be engaging
Smile brightly when you talk to people. Make good eye contact and laugh freely. Ask questions and show interest in their answers. Interesting people are interested in others. When people ask you questions about yourself give full, honest answers and be open to being talked to, not just by people who you think look interesting but by everyone even if it’s just for a few minutes.

5. Don’t drink too much
A few drinks may well help you loosen up but really drunk people are boring. Alternate alcoholic drinks with soft ones if you feel more comfortable with a glass in your hand and eat plenty of food.

6. Conversation
Read the newspaper and current magazines in the days leading up to the party. By doing this you will probably form some opinions on current affairs or find interesting/funny things which can make good topics of conversation. Conversation topics don’t have to be things outside your own experience. Look back over your year or life and think of the most unusual things you have done and be happy to share.

7. Party dates
If you are on a date at a party don’t sit in a corner just talking to them, move around, introduce them to your friends and use the party as an opportunity to show them a bit more about you. Don’t feel you have to baby-sit them or have them by your side the whole time.

If you are at a party with a date and you don’t know anyone hiding in your date’s shadow isn’t going to make you look attractive. Talk to people, have a dance and most importantly show that you are OK on your own. Regular eye contact, hand squeezing and light caresses with your date will let them know you are definitely with them even if you are talking to lots of other people.

8. Participate
Participate in any games or dancing that happen. Get involved and don’t be afraid of making a bit of a fool of yourself. People will warm to you if you seem happy to laugh at yourself and have fun with them. Remember if you laugh at yourself you will never run out of material.

9. Let your hair down
Before you go to a party make sure you know how you are going get home as that will go a long way to helping you relax and enjoy yourself. Don’t be too self-conscious or obsessed with what other people think about you.

10. Don’t just disappear
Stay as long as you are happy and comfortable and when it comes time to leave say goodbye to everyone especially your hosts; all the people you have spoken to, saying it was nice to meet them and anyone you haven’t spoken to with a season’s greeting and apology that you didn’t get to speak to them too. Everyone will be sure to remember you and you will leave feeling good.