Sugar daddies come in so many flavors…

Today I was supposed to meet Cowboy, but after a long, drawn out explanation on how discreet he must be due to his ailing wife, and basically flaking on me a few hours before our lunch meeting, I realized that he seems more interested in finding a convenient toy immediately rather than an actual sugar baby, but should I care? Luckily in the time it took me to cancel that reservation, Captain Carl responded back to me on SA asking me to confirm my availability for a slightly later time. Despite initially thinking he might be a creep (after he took forever to reply to my texts and didn’t answer my call), we finally spoke on the phone and agreed to meet. I’m learning to be more patient with these men who are prone to be less ‘text-savvy’.

After I almost approached the wrong man at the bar where Captain Carl said he was, I was relieved to see that he looked completely different than what I imagined, but I liked his clean cut style and the fact that he didn’t emit that horny-toad, desperate, lonely guy vibe that some men do.

Unlike my previous dates since I started this blog and my sugar adventures (Mr. J that turned out to be more like Mr. ‘John’), and attorney #1, Barry, (who probably can’t handle me or any SB) I was completely unabashed in my disclosures to him when asked “what’s your perfect situation, what brought you to the site?”

I couldn’t help but rattle off about my life as it’s been thus far and the many hats I’ve worn professionally that have lead me to seek a mentor and dominant figure in my life who might help focus, guide and discipline me for a change. He seemed so judgmental of me and actually said “Ok, now I’m starting not to believe you!” I looked him square in the face and asked defensively why it was so hard to believe? I explained that not everyone believes their life should be wasted in cubicle, how I could verify my work history and have absolutely no reason to lie to him about such things he retorts saying, “I’m just teasing you”.

Finally he concedes to say, ‘Well, this might be a turn off for you… but I also don’t know what I want to be when I “grow up.” Then goes on to list a handful of various businesses he’s owned, invested in and wants to sell… tells me how he thinks I’d be a “perfect” personal assistant for him since his previous lasted six years and was now a mommy, so he wants someone new to keep his affairs (and privates) in order. He asked me to tell him what my salary requirements are, and said he doesn’t like to discuss money, so once we agree on something it will come “like clockwork” and we never have to speak of it again.

I wanted to call him a mother fucker, but instead I felt an energy shift which boosted my confidence back up. I never should’ve doubted he wanted me in the first place.

I’ve got to stop thinking these men have any control over me because they truly don’t.

“The major difference here is that I don’t have a bank roll to support my various interests or major professional accomplishments under my belt yet!” I snapped in retaliation.

His desire for a ‘personal assistant’ is actually a major turn-on for me because, as mentioned, I don’t just want to waste my time getting to know someone who just wants me solely as an activity or intimacy partner. I can find a fuck buddy anywhere, or wait for Adam to come around and admit he wants to be my boyfriend, but waiting around is exactly what I’m not going to do anymore.

I want to learn while I date multiple daddies, and I’m wondering how many daddies I want at once…

Before I knew it I admitted to Carl that I am so fed up with passive men that I have seriously considered becoming a dominatrix. (This is a topic I haven’t seen addressed yet in many sugar blogs, but personally I’m aware that being serious dom holds a certain allure and power that far supersedes anything many of us have ever fathomed or fantasized about in the sugar bowl). But that’s definitely a topic for another day…

Now Carl is back in his home state, awaiting my “decision”, Cowboy is actively seeking a discreet sb, Barry is sweet but boring and Adam is the regular joe who I want to do very naughty things with… but will wait.

Sugar Babies: Do you think having a married SD is worth the trouble? And have you ever had a SD request you as a personal assistant with benefits? What would you do and what would be your salary requirements?

Ivy

XXXO

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This blog was created as a memoir and in-depth account of my real encounters, experiences and research findings. I hope that it may help shed light on the dating scene from an objective, (albiet “amateur” point of view) as it pertains to “sugar”. I also hope to educate, entertain and inspire along the way.

2 Comment(s)

I am still deciding on the married aspect as well. I would think being a personal assistant and he your boss as a way of him having more control over you, which you said you needed discipline… I am just getting started in the Sugar Bowl and trying to figure out salary req too. any insight would help me and my blog 🙂

I think staying away from “married” men is a good idea. Sugar babies have a bad enough rep as it is (not that I care), but as the saying goes “there are more fish in the sea!” So I’m not worried about it anymore. Thanks for your comment btw, I already feel its so helpful for everyone to get involved and share viewpoints! As for the pa job, I see what you mean about him wanting more control… he literally said “(my ex) paid my bills, and I don’t even know what my bills are” which kind of sounds like b.s. to me… but I think of it like this, Ill find out if he’s serious or not when I make my first “salary” (+sugar) request which will include a serious work schedule as I do have time to help him, and if he doesn’t submit some sort of retainer or make a motion of good will I can just “quit” without any dings on my resume. I see it all as a win-win! Lol…