Kolleen: OMG you guys. Letty’s computer has busted and I’ve been inundated with schoolwork. Things are out of control, like that old show with Dave Coulier. I can’t even. But I’m at work and I’m bored so let’s further my procrastination with a Degrassi episode! ::It’s Been A While.…::

We open with EMMA of COURSE. I am so bored with Emma and her weird, half crimped hair. Like, if you’re going to crimp your hair, crimp it all the way! What is this?

WHY

It’s Friday in Canada and Sean is trying, in his own bumbling way, to ask Emma to “hang out” tonight. Is it a date? Maybe! Who knows! Sean is the vaguest boy in the world. Why doesn’t he just say how he ~feels~?

Emma’s life is HARD. Toby likes her, but she wishes he didn’t. “Why can’t he like you instead of me?” she says to Manny. Girl, you are NOT all that… stop being a snob. She recounts to Manny what Sean said and now they’re both unsure if it’s a date or if it’s just a friendly chillax sesh. Furrowed brows ensue.

In Miss Quan’s class, permission slips are being passed around for the field trip to Romeo and Juliet. But a persistent tapping is distracting her. It’s Spinner. He’s not listening to her at all! He’s listening to his Discman! Oh man. She takes it from him and gives him detention for a week, A struggle ensues and the Discman is broken (well, the batteries fall out anyway). He’s pissed, and she says it’s his fault. “Keep wasting my time, and I’ll keep wasting yours,” she retorts. Is it me, or is Miss Quan really on edge lately?

In gym, Manny and Emma are still harping on Sean’s intentions. “Couldn’t he have been a bit more romantic?” Emma spits out. Geez, Ems, calm down. You were all psyched about it ten minutes ago. She confronts him and he just says “Yeah” and walks away. So of course, she annihilates him with a dodge ball. Way to show your maturity, Emma. I’m sure you’re emotionally ready for the complexities of a teenage romance.

“If you can dodge teen girl angst you can dodge a ball!”

In the hall, Jimmy, Ashley and Terri discuss how bitchy Miss Quan is. Then Jimmy and Ash start making out and who walks by to stop them? MISS QUAN. What are the odds? She actually says to them, “You two may think you’re adorable, but that doesn’t mean anyone else does.” That is just rude (but true) IMHO. Jimmy tells Spinner in the cafe, and they discuss getting revenge. Jimmy is reluctant though, and do you blame him? He doesn’t want to end up pulling KP too!

Meanwhile Emma and Ash are STILL trying to figure out what the hell is up with Sean. Emma even asked Toby, who insisted that Sean was just being polite. No one has any manners at Degrassi; everyone knows you should not ever ask the boy who likes you about the boy that you like! Paige butts in to ask if Emma needs any advice. Paige insists that it’s officially a date and that boys don’t have any sort of discernible IQ and that’s why they can’t just ask a girl out like a proper gentleman.

In English, which is confusing because I assumed this was the same day but I guess either 1) they have English twice or 2) it’s the next day but isn’t it Friday?, Miss Quan is held up with Mr. Radish. Spinner of course takes this opportunity to do an imitation of her, and since this is television, it means she’ll probably overhear and get mad, even if it IS a spot on imitation. She overhears via the intercom and boom– Jimmy has detention too. In detention, Jimmy and Spinner decide they’ve had enough of Miss Quan’s crap and that they will get their revenge after all. We also learn Spinner is left handed. Cool.

In computer class Sean and Emma chat via AIM and then realize they’re both being stupid. Sean says he’ll pick her up at 7 at her place. Jesus, I hope they can keep these lines of communication clear in the future. At home Emma’s mom tries and fails at giving her advice, then takes this horrible Polaroid of them:

Horrible

Once outside, a bird immediately poops all over Emma’s shoulder, so this will obviously be the best date ever.

Miss Quan is teaching a ESL class at night, so Jimmy and Spinner sneak into the office to use the PA system. As she is giving the class a test on verb tenses, Spinner is chewing loudly into the microphone. This makes Miss Quan CRAZY. She asks the class to stop chewing gum, but of course no one is. She goes to check the office, and no one is there (actually they’re just hiding under the desk– why wouldn’t she look there?). For phase two, they order a bunch of hot wings, which sounds DELICIOUS.

On their hot date, Emma is asserting her feminist ethics and insists on paying for Sean’s food. It’s a veggie burger, and he’s happy which gets her all excited because she thinks he’s a vegetarian, but actually he just is skeeved because his aunt and uncle raise cattle for slaughter. Then he tells her he can’t eat meat anymore…. so he is a vegetarian? What a confusing guy! Later Emma realizes she can’t find her wallet; she thinks she has thrown it out. Sean is nice and digs through the garbage for it, but they can’t find it.

In Miss Quan’s class, the wings have arrived and the students are psyched! However, Miss Quan isn’t– it’s like $50 for those wings. The students help pay so I guess it works out, but being a type A bitch Quan is not happy.

I will eat the chicken wing. I eat the chicken wing. I ate the chicken wing.

Outside, phase 3 is happening: Spinner is pelting Miss Quan’s car with eggs. Jimmy joins in until they see her approaching. They hide in the bushes and watch in horror as she breaks down into tears. Spinner nods in approval of her obvious pain, but Jimmy feels bad.

Those monsters… My parents were eggs.

Sean is digging through a mountain of garbage and Emma recounts her steps… and realizes that it’s in her jacket pocket, after all. Why wouldn’t you check there first? Stupid Emma is always jumping to conclusions. “Someone must have stolen it!!” Did she learn NOTHING from last episode? Embarrassed, she runs away.

Monday at school, Emma is still all stressed about her disastrous date, while her friends… even Toby!… try to reassure her. Sean comes in and asks her for a copy of their date picture, which obviously means he loves her. Crisis averted again.

In English Mr. Radish (hehe) tells the class that Miss Quan has taken a leave of absence for the rest of the term, which means the field trip is cancelled. Terri asks if Miss Quan is okay, and Mr. Radish says that her husband is basically dying and she’s been working overtime to make ends meet, and the pressure was just too much. Cue Jimmy and Spinner feeling like total jerks. Lesson learned?

These episodes… I know I’ve said it before, but they end so strangely… It’s like they can’t think of a way to round out the episode. Cut four minutes of Emma whining about nothing and you can end your plot line in an efficient way. Get it together, Degrassi!

Well that’s it for now, I’ll be back later in the week with more goofy teen drama. Everybody pray for Letty’s technology woes. Maybe someone can send her a new computer? Think about it!