Tuesday, May 31, 2016

“WORLD NO TOBACCO DAY” is observed around the world every year on 31 May.

This year –31 May 2016 –is “World No Tobacco Day”

If you are a smoker – why don’t you celebrate “World No Tobacco Day” on 31 May 2016 by quitting smoking forever...?

To help you quit smoking –I felt that it would be apt to post – once again – this self-help article I wrote 14 years ago in the year 2002 (when I quit smoking forever)

I have revised and reposted this article online many times in my blogs and elsewhere.

Many smokers found these tips useful and have told me that reading this article helped them quit smoking.

It may be worthwhile to browse through it once again if you want to stop smoking permanently.

Even if you do not smoke – maybe you can share this blog post to someone who smokes and wants to quit.

Do you smoke?

Do you want to quit smoking?

I was a smoker once and it has been almost 14 years since I quit smoking forever.

Let me tell you how I quit smoking.

It was a three stage process.

1. First –I learned the art of smoking.

2. Then –I actually physically quit smoking.

3. Finally –I made sure that I did not start smoking again.

Read about it below and try it yourself.

This technique works - you can take my word for it.

Ever since I quit smoking more than ten years ago I have never even had the slightest desire to smoke a cigarette.

So – if you are a smoker – why don’t you quit smoking on “World No Tobacco Day 2016”...?

And – if your spouse, colleagues or friends are smokers – do pass on this article to them.

HOW TO QUIT SMOKING

(in Three Simple Steps)

Self Help Guide

By

VIKRAM KARVE

HOW TO QUIT SMOKING IN 3 SIMPLE STEPS

Step 1 - Learn The Art of Smoking

Step 2 - Stop Smoking (How to avoid withdrawal symptoms and tackle the day after you quit smoking)

Step 3 - How to ensure you do not start smoking again.

Part 1 – LEARN THE ART OF SMOKING

Do you want to quit smoking forever?

Then first you will have to master The Art of Smoking.

The first step towards quitting smoking is to learn how to enjoy smoking.

And in order to learn how to derive supreme enjoyment from smoking one must first learn the art of smoking.

Seems absurd – a paradox – isn’t it?

I stopped smoking more than seven years ago and I know I shall never smoke again.

Let me tell you how I quit smoking.

If you are a smoker, maybe you can benefit from my experience, or maybe you can pass this to a smoker friend who wants to quit.

I got my clue from an apocryphal teaching story I read somewhere. I reflected upon it, carrying it my mind for a long time, until I fathomed the story’s inner depth and meaning.

A seeker asks the master, “Can I smoke while meditating?”

“No!” scolds the master angrily.

Another seeker then asks, “Can I meditate while smoking?”

“Yes!” says the master knowingly realizing that this seeker is on the path to enlightenment.

This is the key, the first step – if you really want to stop smoking.

First learn to meditate while smoking.

Here’s how I did it.

One evening, I take one cigarette, just one, and walk down to Marine Drive and sit down on the parapet, at the southern tip near Nariman Point, in the cool sea breeze watching the sun being swallowed up by the Arabian Sea, crimson-yellow petals being thrown high up in the distant sky gradually devoured by the enveloping twilight.

Soon it is dark, quiet and tranquil, and I feel calm and relaxed.

I take out the cigarette from my pocket and hold it in front of me, look at it lovingly and close my eyes.

Yes, you must close your eyes – it accentuates your other senses, makes you more conscious of what’s going on inside you.

I hold the cigarette near my nose and breathe in the rich aroma of the tobacco, gently moving the cigarette as I take deep breaths, savoring the sweet fragrance of the tobacco tinged with the fresh scent of the paper and filter, until my olfactory system is truly and fully satiated.

I then put the filter between my lips, taste it and suck in air deeply through the unlighted cigarette.

It feels good.

I then open my eyes, light the cigarette, close my eyes, get ready and take a deep drag, focusing on my breath as I inhale, allowing the smoke to permeate deep within me, infusing a sensation I cannot describe, and watching carefully with my inner eye as I exhale – slow, long and relaxing.

Is my system being energized or depleted – I do not know – but I continue my unhurried meditative smoking, eyes gently closed, my inner senses fully conscious, aware, observing attentively, till the cigarette is over.

I open my eyes, come out of my trance and instinctively I gulp in a huge amount of the fresh sea breeze and rinse my lungs and system.

As I walk back I decide that this is how I shall smoke each and every cigarette from now on – meditative mindful smoking – the only way I shall smoke.

Most “smokers” haven’t learnt how to enjoy a smoke.

We keep puffing away every waking moment of their lives without even noticing it.

You grab a quick smoke in a hurry, you smoke when you are bored, you smoke while talking, while working, while doing something - smoking and multitasking - that is the problem - smoking and multitasking.

You smoke unconsciously, cigarette after cigarette, without even realizing it.

Is it worth it ... ?

Why smoke if you don’t enjoy it ... ?

I decide.

Whenever I feel like smoking I shall stop everything and prepare myself for a meditative smoke.

I will go to some quiet place where I can sit undisturbed, alone.

Yes I must be alone.

Meditative smoking is a solitary activity.

When I smoke, I shall only smoke – no multitasking.

No more smoking with friends, with tea or coffee, no more smoking in the office feeling a guilt conscience that non-smokers don’t like it or at home with my wife nagging me, no more hurried puffs, no more mindless unconscious smoking – only meditative, mindful, conscious smoking in glorious solitude, maintaining inner calm and tranquility, and total awareness.

I follow this religiously, and soon I discover that the number of cigarettes required to satisfy me have drastically reduced and soon I am smoking only one cigarette a day – every evening, at sunset, just as I described it.

For me smoking is a special occasion requiring solitude and a congenial ambience, and if I cannot create the right atmosphere, both internally and externally, I shall not smoke.

When you have mastered something it’s time to let go and move on.

One day I feel I have mastered the art of smoking, derived all the enjoyment I wanted to from this activity, and reached a state of contentment and satiety.

It’s time to let go.

At sunset I go to my favourite place on Marine Drive, enjoy my final meditative smoke and toss the cigarette butt into the sea.

It’s been more than seven years now and I haven’t had a smoke since nor have I ever felt the urge or craving to smoke.

I know I will never smoke again.

I have quit smoking forever.

Quitting smoking is easy.

You must ensure you don’t start smoking again.

You have to break the habit forever.

For this it is best to use an NLP technique like Anchoring combined with Force Field Analysis which I have described in Part 2 below.

And don’t worry about withdrawal symptoms – it’s a myth.

It is my personal experience that:

There are no such things as withdrawal symptoms when you stop smoking.

I am writing all about it in Part 2 below: THE DAY AFTER I QUIT SMOKING

Part 2 –THE DAY AFTER I QUIT SMOKING

Here is the story of the day after I quit smoking.

One of the things that deters smokers from quitting decisively in one go is the fear of withdrawal symptoms.

This results in smokers resorting to half-baked remedies like gradual reduction, nicotine patches, low tar cigarettes, electric cigarettes and various other futile therapies.

In my opinion this exaggerated importance given to withdrawal symptoms is just a big myth, a ploy, an excuse by addicts to avoid giving up smoking.

The so-called withdrawal symptoms are nothing but craving.

The best and most effective way of quitting smoking is to just stop smoking, totally, in one go, and then never to smoke again.

Don’t be afraid of the so-called “withdrawal symptoms” – you can easily tackle the craving.

You can take my word for it – I successfully did it and conquered the craving for smoking once and for all.

I have written earlier and described how I quit smoking.

I’m sure you must have read it right here in my blog.

Now let me describe to you the day after I quit smoking. [and banish the fear of “withdrawal symptoms” from your minds once and for all!].

I woke up early, at five-thirty as usual, made a cup of tea, and the moment I took a sip of the piping hot delicious tea, I felt the familiar crave for my first cigarette of the day.

I kept down the cup of tea, made a note of the craving in my diary, had a glass of hot water (quickly heated in the microwave oven), completed my ablutions, and stepped out of my house.

I crossed the Maharshi Karve Road, and began a brisk walk-cum-jog around the verdant tranquil Oval Maidan, deeply rinsing my lungs with the pure refreshing morning air, which made me feel on top of the world.

The Clock on Mumbai University’s Rajabai Tower silhouetted against the calm bluish gray sky, was striking six, and I felt invigorated by the fresh cool air cleansing my lungs.

I had overcome my craving and not smoked what used to be my first cigarette of the day.

I then went on my daily morning walk on Marine Drive all the way to Chowpatty and back to Land’s End at Nariman Point.

On my way back, I spotted my friends ‘N’ and ‘S’ across the road beckoning me for our customary post-exercise tea and cigarette at the stall opposite Mantralaya.

I felt tempted, but my resolve firm, I waved out to them, looked away and ran towards my house.

They must have thought I had gone crazy, but it did not matter – I had avoided what used to be my second cigarette of the day.

I made a note of it my diary, as I would do the entire day of all the stimuli that triggered in me the urge to smoke – what I would call my “smoking anchors”.

It was most important as to how I tackled and triumphed over these stimuli which created the smoking craving in me.

I had to overcome my “smoking anchors”.

After breakfast, I did not drink my usual cup of coffee – a strong “smoking anchor” which triggered in me a desperate desire to smoke.

I drank a glass of bland milk instead of my customary cup of coffee – thereby averting what used to be my third cigarette of the day.

Yes, I had not smoked my third cigarette of the day.

It was nine, as I walked to work, and I hadn’t smoked a single cigarette since morning.

It was a long day ahead and I had to be cognizant, observe myself inwardly and devise strategies to tackle situations that elicited craving for smoking – recognize and neutralize my “smoking anchors”, so to speak.

Anchoring is a naturally occurring phenomenon, a natural process that usually occurs without our awareness.

An anchor is any representation in the human nervous system that triggers any other representation.

Anchors can operate in any representational system (sight, sound, feeling, sensation, smell, taste).

You create an anchor when you unconsciously set up a stimulus response pattern.

Response (smoking) becomes associated with (anchored to) some stimulus; in such a way that perception of the stimulus (the anchor) leads by reflex to the anchored response (smoking) occurring.

Repeated stimulus–response action, reinforces anchors and this is a vicious circle, especially in the context of “smoking anchors”.

The trick is to identify your “smoking anchors”, become conscious of these anchors and ensure you do not activate them.

The moment I reached office I saw my colleague ‘B’ eagerly waiting for me, as he did every day.

Actually he was eagerly waiting to bum a cigarette from me for his first smoke of the day

“I smoke only other’s cigarettes” was his motto!

I politely told him I had quit smoking and told him to look elsewhere.

He looked at me in disbelief; taunted, jeered and badgered me a bit, but when I stood firm, he disappeared.

I had avoided what would have been my fourth cigarette of the day!

I removed my ashtray from my office.

I declared the entire place a “no-smoking zone” and put up signs to that effect.

The working day began.

It was a tough and stressful working day.

I was tired, when my boss called me across, and offered me a cigarette.

I looked at the cigarette pack yearningly, tempted, overcome by a strong craving, desperate to have just that “one” cigarette.

Nothing like a “refreshing” smoke to drive my blues away and revitalize me – the “panacea” to my “stressed-out” state!

It was now or never!

I politely excused myself on the pretext of going to the toilet, but rushed out into the open and took a brisk walk – deep breathing and rinsing my lungs with fresh air.

By the time I returned I had lost the craving to smoke.

I realized, like during my walk around the Oval early in the morning, that physical exercise is probably the best antidote to craving for smoking.

Also, I had avoided what would have been my fifth cigarette of the day.

Now I am going to stop counting...!

People may think I am crazy, but even now I rush out of my office once in a while to take a brisk walk in the open whenever I feel like smoking.

Not only do I lose the craving for a smoke but I feel de-stressed and invigorated as well.

Once I rushed into a “no-smoking” cinema when I desperately felt like a smoke while strolling in the evening.

Often, after dinner, when I used to feel like a smoke, I rushed into the Oxford Bookstore next door, for a long leisurely browse till my craving dissipated.

And, of course, if you are serious about quitting smoking, you will have to change your lifestyle, your activities, and, maybe, even your friends.

Always try to be with like-minded people who you would like to emulate – if you want to quit smoking try to be in the company of non-smokers.

It was simple after that, but my diary for that defining day makes interesting reading of smoking anchors – saunf or supari after lunch, afternoon tea, the company of smokers– all these were smoking anchors which created a craving for a cigarette, besides things like paan, coffee, work stresset al – yes, for some, even stress is a smoking anchor.

I had managed to overcome all my smoking anchors throughout the day.

But the crucial test came in the evening.

My dear friend ‘A’ landed up for a drink.

Now ‘A’ is a guy who does not smoke at home in front of his wife and kids.

I am sure his wife knows – as a husband cannot keep secrets from his wife – especially “minor” vices...

So since he does not smoke in his own home, he makes up in other people’s houses.

But mind you, he does not bum cigarettes – in fact he gets a full pack of cigarettes and generously leaves the remaining cigarettes behind for the host (since he cannot take them home).

We poured out a rum–paani each, clinked our glasses, said cheers, and sipped.

My friend ‘A’ lit a cigarette and offered the pack to me.

It was the end of a hot, humid and tiring day.

The fortifying “rum–paani”beverage had induced a heavenly ambrosial sensation which permeated throughout the body.

What better way to synergise the enjoyment than to smoke a cigarette along with the drink and enhance the pleasure to sheer bliss.

Till that moment, for me, drinking and smoking were inextricably intertwined – smoking and drinking complemented and accentuated each other and gave me the ultimate supreme pleasure.

I enjoyed my smoke the most along with my favourite “Rum–Paani” drink.

I realized that drinking was my strongest “smoking anchor”.

And if I had to quit smoking permanently – I would have to give up drinking forever.

So that’s what I did.

At this defining moment of my life – I quit drinking forever.

It’s been more than 14 years now since that day – and – I do not smoke and I do not drink.

I will never smoke again – I have quit smoking forever.

I may be tempted to smoke – but I know I can overcome the urge – because I have mastered the art of taking charge of my “smoking anchors”.

And from time to time – I shall look at my old diary to remember and cherish that cardinal day of my life – ‘The Day after I Quit Smoking’.

Dear Reader, I did not experience any withdrawal symptoms. I am sure you won't too.

So just Quit Smoking today and make it a day to remember.

But what will you do if you get the urge to smoke again?

How will you ensure that you do not start smoking again?

How will you avoid the desire, the craving, to have a smoke?

Simple.

Use FORCE FIELD ANALYSIS.

Read Part 3 – andmake sure you give up smoking forever and never start smoking again.

Part 3 –HOW TO NEVER START SMOKING AGAIN

Force Field Analysis provides a framework for looking at the factors or forces that influence a situation or activity.

Restraining Forces are those which inhibit or discourage the occurrence of a particular activity.

Driving Forces are those which promote, facilitate and encourage the occurrence of the same activity.

Let’s sayDriving Forces are positive anchors and Restraining Forces are negative anchors (similar to the anchors in NLP which we saw in Part 2 above).

Let’s take the case of smoking.

Sit down – close your eyes – and introspect.

Can you identify the stimuli, the triggers, and the situations, the driving forces, which create in you the desire and give rise to the urge to smoke?

3. Change the direction of some driving forces and convert them into restraining forces by using techniques from concepts like NLP, 4T etc or, best of all, your own improvised techniques.

Learn how to tactfully and effectively avoid smoking.

Suppose your friends try to force you to smoke – suppose your friends taunt you saying you are a sissy, spoil sport, killjoy etc – then you must simply say:“Excuse me, but I really must go,” – and then immediately leave the place.

Always be with like-minded people whom you want to emulate.

Remember what Epictetus said:

If you want to do something – make a habit of it

If you do not want to do something – refrain from doing it

I have also read somewhere:

If want to be happily married – remain in the company of happily married people

Similarly:

If you want to stop smoking – try to be in the company of non-smokers

Also – You mustavoid situations which create a craving for smoking.

Do something else in lieu of smoking

Substitute smoking with healthy activities like physical exercise, recreation and creative hobbies – do these activities when you feel like smoking.

Yes – identify your smoking stimuli, triggers, situations, people and anchors, internal and external, tangible and intangible – identify your smoking driving forces that create in you the urge to have a smoke and facilitate smoking.

Then – Identify your smoking restraining forces as well

Mitigate these smoking triggers by improvising force field analysis as it suits you best.

1. This is based on my personal experience. It may or may not work for you. So please do due diligence before trying out this technique.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

Monday, May 30, 2016

A usually urban heterosexual male given to enhancing his personal appearance by fastidious grooming, beauty treatments, and fashionable clothes(merriam-webster)

METROSEXUALS IN UNIFORM

A Spoof

By

VIKRAM KARVE

This happened 31 years ago – in the mid 1980’s – when I was a newly appointed “Directing Staff” (DS) at IAT Pune.

I had barely settled down in my new job – when a paper landed on my table.

I had been appointed “Chairman” of the IAT CSD Canteen.

In actual fact – this was no great appointment.

This was a “bum job” – a sundry duty I had to do in addition to my primary job.

And the high-sounding “Chairman” meant nothing – it was IAT parlance for what we in the Navy called “Officer-in-Charge”.

But – I was in seventh heaven – because I had never been appointed “Chairman” before.

Power went to my head – and I immediately decided to “take charge” – and “show off” my power of “command”.

I decided to pay an immediate visit to my new “empire”.

I summoned the Canteen Manager – an Army JCO

I peremptorily ordered him to get the CSD Canteen opened for my visit.

“Sir – why don’t you come in the evening – when the canteen opens?” he suggested.

“No. I want to take rounds of the canteen right now. And I want to speak to all the canteen staff,” I said firmly – and then I asked the Canteen JCO: “Do you have any problems?”

“No Problems, Sir. I will summon the staff. We will be ready to receive you in 15 minutes,” the Canteen Manager said.

15 minutes later – when I reached the CSD Canteen – located in a dilapidated Nissan Hut – I found the motley canteen staff assembled there.

The Canteen Manager JCO introduced them to me.

I gave them the usual “motivational” pep talk (which they must have heard ad nauseam from every incoming “Chairman”).

“Is there anything urgent?” I asked the Canteen Manager.

“Sir – the monthly demand has to go by tomorrow to the CSD depot. I have already prepared the demand list. I will get the demand list to your office for your signature in the afternoon. If you sign it today – I will send someone to the depot first thing in the morning tomorrow,” he said.

“Why bring it to my office? I will sign the demand right now. That’s how we work in the Navy – we do things ‘right here and right now’...” I bullshitted the JCO.

The Canteen Manager JCO pulled out a huge list from the cupboard.

I was taken aback on seeing the huge demand list – so I asked the Canteen Manager: “Why have you made such a huge list...? Is this a bloody military canteen or a departmental store...?”

The Canteen Manager did not say anything.

I started reading the list.

Then – I took out my pen from my pocket – and – I started striking out items from the list with strokes of my pen

“Are you telling me that soldiers are using fairness creams and colouring their hair with hair-dye...?” I shouted.

“Sir – some officers…” the JCO mumbled.

I looked at the JCO and said firmly: “All ‘faujis’ – yes – all ‘faujis’ –officers and soldiers – all ‘faujis’ are supposed to be tough masculine men – we do not want effeminate ‘metrosexuals’ in the defence services – military men are not supposed to use makeup or cosmetics. Is that clear...?”

“Yes, Sir,” the JCO said, “but the ladies…”

“What ladies…? This applies to military wives too – both ‘faujis’ and ‘faujans’ are supposed to lead simple lives of thrift and frugality. Didn’t I tell you before – this is a bloody military canteen – not a fancy beauty store…” I shouted at the confused Canteen Manager JCO.

I continued to strike off all the “cosmetic” items from the list – while the Canteen Manager watched on.

“No, Sir – it is like a wax – Sir – to put on your beard – so you can tie it up…” the JCO said.

I stroked my handsome full-set Navy beard – and said to the Army JCO: “Look at me – I have a proper full-set flowing beard – I never use ‘hair fixer’ – and – I don’t tie up my beard…”

“Sir – you are in the Navy – in the Army…” the JCO stammered, looking anxious.

He had a point.

Whereas we in the Navy kept our excellent beards free-flowing – the few “Pongos” who were allowed to keep beards – they seemed to tie up their beards in some sort of net.

So – in the interest of “jointmanship” and “inter-service camaraderie”– I said to the Canteen JCO: “Okay, okay – if you feel ‘hair fixer’ is essential – let ‘hair fixer’ be there on the list…”

“Thank you, Sir...” the JCO said, looking relieved.

I observed that the CSD canteen staff was looking at me.

I believe in ‘participative’ management – so I decided to involve all the staff.

I gave the list to the Canteen Manager.

Then – I said to all my canteen staff:

“Come on – all of you – go through the demand list and strike out all cosmetics and beauty products – and also remove all items which are not essential. We should have just one type of every item – for example – we should order just one brand of soap – which is essential for hygiene – soldiers have no need for beauty soaps – do you understand – just have one type of every item which is essential for ‘faujis’– preferably the cheapest item which ‘faujis’ can afford – I wantno fancy or luxury items in this canteen…”

Everyone used their initiative – and “non-essential” items were struck of the list with a vengeance – till the demand was reduced to just one page.

“Sir – what about the ‘beauty products’ we already have stocked in the canteen? Should we throw them out and write them off...?” a ‘highly motivated’ Fauji Johnnie asked.

“No – we cannot throw out items in stock. So you keep selling these cosmetics and beauty products till stocks last – but there is to be no further procurement of cosmetic items,” I said.

The stocks of “beauty products” did not last long.

The first beauty product to be “sold out” was Hair Dye.

I came to know that hair-dye was “out-of-stock”during our customary mid-morning Tea Break.

A“Cavalry” Colonel with suspiciously black hair approached me.

The Colonel complained to me that there was no hair-dye in the CSD Canteen.

1. This blog post is a spoof, satire, pure fiction, just for fun and humor, no offence is meant to anyone, so take it with a pinch of salt and have a laugh.

2. All stories in this blog are a work of fiction. Events, Places, Settings and Incidents narrated in the stories are a figment of my imagination. The characters do not exist and are purely imaginary. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Copyright Notice:

No part of this Blog may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical including photocopying or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Blog Author Vikram Karve who holds the copyright.

About Me

A creative person with a zest for
life, Vikram Karve is a retired Naval Officer turned full time writer. Educated
at IIT Delhi, IIT (BHU) Varanasi, The Lawrence School Lovedale and Bishops School
Pune, Vikram has published two books:COCKTAILa collection of fiction short stories about relationships
(2011) andAPPETITE FOR A STROLLa
book of Foodie Adventures (2008) and is currently working on his novel, writing short fiction and compiling his memoirs. An avid
blogger, he has written a number of fiction short stories, creative
non-fiction articles on a variety of topics including food, books, travel, philosophy, academics, technology, management, health, pet parenting, teaching stories, self help and art of living essays in magazines and journals and published a number of professional research papers and reviews and edited in-house magazines and journals for many years, before the advent
of blogging. Vikram has taught at a University as a Professor for 15 years and now teaches as a visiting faculty and devotes most of his time to
creative writing and blogging. Vikram Karve lives in Pune India with his family and muse -
his pet dog Sherry with whom he takes long walks thinking creative
thoughts.