Wednesday, July 13, 2016

You're sick....Get over it!

Pam and I
have this running conversation about my cancer.She claims I am sick and I should act like it.I claim this is just a temporary
inconvenience, coupled with a “stay at home” vacation (stay-cation?).My position drives her crazy.Not nearly as crazy as having me around all
the time, “helping out” by reorganizing the food pantry and the cupboards.I now understand what my mom meant after my
dad retired when she said “for better or for worst but not for lunch”.

I have to
admit that as the treatments have progressed there are times when it’s hard not
to acknowledge that I have cancer.Like when I’m spending more time sitting in the hospital hooked up to an
IV than I do any other activity except sleeping.You realize more than half the blood in your
body came from someone else.When I
have so many pill bottles lined up on my shelf that I need a spreadsheet to
track what I need to take and when (really…I have a spreadsheet…..and a second
one to track all the doctors).When
nurses and administrative people at the hospital as well as at the local pharmacy
know you on a first name basis (and are asking after your children and
grandchildren).You not only know what
your Absolute Neutrophil count is but know what it means.I can crush a soda can with my right hand
but because of the picc line in the left arm I can barely open a water
bottle.

The thing is,
after a while this all seems normal (I think I blogged on the new normal a
couple of months back).It’s easy to
fall into a mode of letting others do things for you, because you are sick.There
is no question that there are things Pam and I either can’t do, can’t do
ourselves, or that I’m not supposed to do (like yard work, gardening, and
lifting heavy objects).There are
certainly no shortage of family and good friends who have generously volunteered
to do whatever they could to help, and no question we have gotten better at
leaning on them.But at some point you have to decide if you
are going to let the cancer define you or adopt the view “I’m not sick, I’m
just not marathon ready. “

Tomorrow I
head back into the hospital for another round of chemo.I know this one will be tough…each
successive one gets nastier.For the
next week while I’m dealing with the effects it will be pretty hard not to
acknowledge I’m “not well” but I know I will come out the other side.

So there are
two ways to view “You’re Sick…get over it!One is to accept it and let it define you and your actions.The other is to refuse to acknowledge that it
is anything more than a temporary situation and you will “get over it”.I choose the latter.

11 comments:

Dave you are still and always will be true to the gifts God gave you and the amazing person you are, the same positive, goal-oriented man who finds humor and joy in your life, never letting any tough scrapes define or limit you, the same loving husband, father, grandfather and yes, our brother-in-law, always choosing the high road of optimism and grace, while running marathons in Nick's memory and throwing anchors out to those in need. You have blessed us with your love, kindness and patience (except of course when we argue over best way to cook the chestnuts) and will continue to. Please know you are surrounded by your family and friends' love and prayers as you make your way through this next week. You haven't wavered in your resolution to overcome this bump in the road nor looked back. Here's to your spirit and wisdom. All our Bentley love and hugs.

Hey Dave...Like your comment "I'm not sick, just not Marathon Ready" Don't lose that attitude and you will be marathon ready sooner than you think! Think I will borrow this, slightly modified...I am not sick, just not 5K ready.

To admit to being "sick" is to admit to being a mortal. That doesn't seem to fit you or your persona, so I will continue to bet on you kicking ass on this insidious disease.We are all here rooting for you! Good luck with the next round.

Nick Loved Snowboarding

Much better than running

Help in the Nick of Time Foundation

Help in the Nick of Time is a charity set up in the memory of our son Nick who loved sports and helping people. The goal of the organization is to work through local charity organizations to direct assistance to single parent families facing short term needs to help them get back on their feet. Donations can be made at the link below through the ECCF. Simply click on the link below, and where it says PLEASE CHOOSE FROM THE FOLLOWING FUNDS: , click on the arrow next to the field and scroll down the list and select Help in the Nick of Time.

About Me

Life is a series of shared experiences that together define who we are and the impact we have on other lives.
This is all about one of those experiences I would like to share with others in the hope it touches and enhances their lives. At a minimum it should provide some entertaining moments.