There were a few events planned for the weekend (see the prog later on) but not
all were completely successful .....

..... the final of the amateur Greco-Roman Wrestling
competition proved a disappointingly one-sided affair!

Sensing the crowd's disappointment, Mayor Harry Isaacs,
tried to entertain them with an impromptu display of his basketball
skills!

But eventually an angry mob, er ... crowd, I mean ...
somebody demanded that they get on with it.

And so to the great opening ceremony.

I said 'and so to the great opening ceremony'.

It sort of went a bit prune-shaped to be honest. There I was minding my own
business (and pint) when Harry Isaacs (the Mayor if you haven't been paying
attention to recent bulletins) popped up dressed in all his electrician's finery
(overalls, raspberry beret, assorted screwdrivers and trailing wires for the
fashion conscious out there).

"Well, from memory," spake I, "Joan Tanner did a spiel about
midday last year, so you are probably due on in twenty minutes or so. Why don't
you go and ask the CAMRA bloke yonder."

So, off stalked Harry. Consultations took place. Away went Harry to return a
quarter of an hour later suitably suited and with the mayoral gear safely
stashed in a James Bond briefcase. After a brief tussle with the recalcitrant
object I finally managed to get Harry mayorally chained up.

So, there he was, all dressed up with ..... no PA!

Yes, it hadn't occurred to the organisers to organise some method by which
the guests of honour could communicate with their audience. To be honest, Harry
didn't really need a PA. He used to be a drill instructor in the army so they'd
have probably been able to hear him in Carbis Bay if he'd put some oomph into
it! However, the other guests might not be so good at shouting and so, much
delaying, rending of hair and gnashing of teeth took place while Rod, from the
NCI, was despatched to some undisclosed location to grab their PA.

I (thatís me) own the copyright
in all the content of this site (except where otherwise acknowledged). You can
read it, download it, transmit it and reproduce it only for your own personal
use. You are not allowed to bugger about with it. If your computer explodes as a
result of accessing this site and its contents, itís nothing to do with me,
mate! Copyright Vile Jelly Publications
2001-2009. All rights (and some wrongs) reserved.