I'd gone to a job-hunting workshop in my 20s, led by a savvy career coach. He gave lots of advice, including, "If you're ever invited for an interview in a faraway city, make sure to ask the following question."

I wrote the question down in my notebook, although it seemed nervy. A few months later, a recruiter called about a job in Florida.

After we scheduled an interview in Miami, I put the recruiter on hold for a few seconds. Then I dashed around the apartment, found the notebook, and flipped to the question.

"Will you be sending the plane ticket," I asked, "or would you prefer me to invoice you?" (Note: that's the "fries or shake," assumptive close.)

After a short pause, which seemed endless, the recruiter agreed to the invoice.

So I went to Miami. I didn't get the job, but not because of the question. Today, that question seems tame, and worth asking.

Does that mean assumptive questions are ok? Well, depends on the context. And that reminds me of something else the career coach said:

"For 95% of you, when you think you're being obnoxiously aggressive, you're really just being appropriately assertive."

Good advice. Unless you're in that 5%.

Tip: Avoid asking loaded questions. At least 95% of the time.

PS - Even simple questions can be dangerous. Consider John Sculley's test at PepsiCo.

He created the Pepsi Challenge, an ad campaign based on giving people a blind taste test (you didn't know what you were drinking) between Pepsi and Coke, and then asking, "Which do you prefer?"

Most preferred Pepsi. But not everyone. One day, while being interviewed on TV, Sculley was challenged to take the taste test. He did, and lost.

I don't think Pepsi used that data in their ad campaign. "Everyone prefers Pepsi," the ad might have said, "except for our President, who says, 'Darn it, I really love Coke!'"