When's the last time a voyeuristic shot of a woman lying crumpled in her underwear on the floor in a defeated position, as if she'd just been thrown there, facing away from the camera, made you go "Ooh, I should order that demi cup!" Never? Yeah, me neither.

Wait, you didn't want to look at that bare-assed cow? Well, neither did we. And if we have to, you have to. This isn't some kind of Furry erotica nor is it a PETA PSA; rather, it's the creepiest ad campaign in the history of the world, for a Brazilian web portal. The tag line (there's also a semi-nekkid teddy bear and…