Posts Tagged ‘Self Control’

ScienceDaily (Mar. 8, 2012) — Feeling angry and annoyed with others is a daily part of life, but most people don’t act on these impulses. What keeps us from punching line-cutters or murdering conniving co-workers? Self-control. A new review article in Current Directions in Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science, examines the psychological research and finds that it’s possible to deplete self-control — or to strengthen it by practice.

Criminologists and sociologists have long believed that people commit violent crimes when an opportunity arises and they’re low on self-control. “It’s an impulsive kind of thing,” says Thomas F. Denson, a psychologist at the University of New South Wales. He cowrote the new article with C. Nathan DeWall at the University of Kentucky and Eli J. Finkel at Northwestern University. For the last 10 years or so, psychologists have joined this research, using new ways of manipulating self-control in experiments; they have found that, indeed, self-control and aggression are tightly linked.

A psychological scientist can deplete someone’s self-control by telling the subject they’re not allowed to take one of the cookies sitting in front of them. Studies have found that, after people have had to control themselves for a while, they behave more aggressively. In a 2009 study, after someone’s self-control was depleted, they were more likely to respond aggressively to nasty feedback that ostensibly came from their husband or girlfriend. Specifically, they assigned their partner to hold a painful yoga pose for longer.

On the other hand, it’s also possible to practice self-control the same way you would practice the piano. In Denson’s experiments, he has people try to use their non-dominant hand for two weeks. So, if they’re right-handed, they’re told to use their left hand “for pretty much anything that’s safe to do,” he says. “Using the mouse, stirring your coffee, opening doors. This requires people to practice self-control because their habitual tendency is to use their dominant hands.” After two weeks, people who have practiced self-control control their aggression better. In one experiment, they’re mildly insulted by another student and have the option of retaliating with a blast of white noise — but people who have practiced self-control respond less aggressively.

“I think, for me, the most interesting findings that have come out of this is that if you give aggressive people the opportunity to improve their self-control, they’re less aggressive,” Denson says. It’s not that aggressive people don’t want to control themselves; they just aren’t very good at it. In fact, if you put aggressive people in a brain scanner and monitor their brain activity while insulting them, the parts of the brain involved in self-control are actually more active than in less aggressive people. So it might be possible to teach people who struggle with anger or violence problems to control themselves more easily.

For people who aren’t inclined toward violence, it may also be useful to practice self-control — by trying to improve your posture, for example. In the short term, this can deplete self-control and make it harder to control your impulses. “But if you practice that over the long term, your self-control capacity gets stronger over time,” Denson says. “It’s just like practicing anything, really — it’s hard at first.” But, over time, it can make that annoying colleague easier to deal with.

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Millions of people each day seek balance of the emotions in an upsetting, face-pace world, yet these people often struggle with the emotions that cause interruptions ongoing.

The problems never seem to end. Emotions cause joy, anger, resentment, sadness and all these powerful emotions lead to either results or negative consequences. Emotions cause reactions to physiological stimuli. The mind sees these stimuli, perceiving it based on what one has learned throughout his life.

Emotions can become intense based on the intensity of stimuli or triggers that target the emotions. Commonly, when the emotions feel threatened, the level of intensity causes the emotions to react at the same heights of the stimuli charge. It is detrimental at this point to take control of the emotions by regulating self.

E.I. is one’s emotional intelligence. This quotient measures our ability to regulate and control the emotions during high intense situations. One must use self-analyzing tactics to regulate and monitor the emotions to develop E.I., in turn, developing self-control.

Humans depend on the emotions and mind. The emotions determine our faith because all the energies come from this area whether it is a good outcome or bad outcome. It decides our faith because how we respond to these emotions leads to the consequences we face.

Self-dynamics is relevant to balance and emotions. It is essential that one understands the functions of the mind and emotions. The mind is our brainpower. This brainpower houses the intellect, which allots one to care for self, set objectives, stay attune to surroundings, think, concentrate, heed warning in dangerous situations, and so on. The emotions on the other hand houses functions that cause one to feel sentiments express and feel sensations and cultivate passion.

By understanding what the mind and emotions house and what they give us the capability to do, one can move to seek balance. Note that the mind can join in harmony with the emotions because our intellect causes feelings to trigger the emotions. Note that the mind allots one to stay in tune of his surroundings. By developing emotion-mental strength of mind you can avoid many situations that you may confront by staying alert to your actions, behaviours, habits, and those of others around you as well. Practice daily, building your consciousness to prevail and balance the emotions and mind.

Note that your mind enables you to set objectives while the emotions enable you to feel passion. Your passions could produce strong feelings, such as anger that could lead to rage or outbursts. On the other hand, your passions could produce favourable traits, such as excitement, zeal, or enthusiasm. It is up to you to decide what passions you want to cultivate. One of best techniques one can use to develop positive passions is to self-examine or analyze self regularly. Make it a habit daily to look inside of you to decide what your passions can produce.

The mind allows one to use logic for reasoning. Theoretical, when the mind and emotions work in harmony, thus one can make sound judgments. The problem is our emotional judgment is not always reliable. Inaccuracies develop here because of influences and persuasion we learnt from educational programs, parents, siblings, peers, and observational learning. Thus, all of these inaccuracies develop from our conceptions and the way we perceive things at that time. Thus, one must reform the conceptions and perceptions in order to harmonize the emotions and mind to work through emotional judgment inaccuracies.

Thus, one must achieve mind over emotions, E.I. in order to develop self-control. We encourage you to read often so that you can become well versed, which is the best way to reform the emotions, encouraging them to work with you instead of against you. Aspects that aid us in controlling self must be discovered.

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Self-control is one of the various divisions of self-development. It is the capacity to encourage oneself to do the right things in life and curb our animal desires. However, the root of this self-development lies in a strong will power and disciplining oneself. Self-control produces a kind of confidence in us to the things that we think are difficult to achieve. It creates a drive of perseverance in us that make us accomplish our goals. One’s motivation empowers that person and making it possible to accept challenges that assist us with developing self-control.

But, it is important that an ample amount of rest be taken effectively apply self-control in life. An individual should find ways to relax himself. It may be by listening music, exercise and other things that boost up one’s energy levels. This will make it easy for the individual to accomplish his task. For instance, if there is a student who wants to complete a target of completing his entire course in a single day for a particular subject, then he may be studying the whole day. But, this may create a lot of stress on his mind and hamper his ability of learning. So if he would take breaks in between to relax himself then this will reduce stress and improve his productivity.

Self-awareness is the foremost aspect that needs to be dealt with for a successful self-control. This means that one should first analyze one’s own personality and figure out his strengths and weaknesses. After this, he should try to resist the temptations that he faces in life in relation to his weaknesses. This is to say that if one loves ice cream and is used to have it everyday, then he should make efforts to limit it to twice a week. This is how a person strengthens up and develops strong will power thereby contributing to self-development.

So we can say that self-control is actually the willingness to reject one’s own temptation to a particular thing or a task. This brings us to the next aspect of self-control i.e. strong will power. Our will power makes us take a serious decision to complete a task. Most of us have the tendency to make up our mind for a mission, but due to our laziness or desire for other comforts, we are not able to abide to it. The most common example of this can be exercising in the morning, which we usually give up because we do not want to sacrifice on our sleep. This is where we actually understand the essence of a strong will power. A person with a strong will power will give up his comforts and establish his mission. This will power generally reduces in stressful conditions.

Last but not the least, is the aspect of self-discipline. All these three aspects of self-control are however interlinked. But each of them has a separate role to play. Self-discipline refers to fighting with one’s own feelings. In this, one has to discover the actual cause of one’s temptation and consciously negating it by getting involved in other interesting activities. This will in turn, develop a strong will power. Analyzing the consequences, that one’s actions in future will also help in reducing the urge for the temptation.

An optimistic approach to life will surly take an individual on the path of success as when an individual thinks positively then he will have a healthy body and thereby able to accomplish his tasks in a better way.

Thus, self-awareness, strong will power and self-disciplines together lead to an effective self-control and further to self-development. Learn the fruitages of self-control.

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Nowadays, the increase in competition has made most of us forget our values and traditions. This had brought us more close to the negativities of life. The drive to achieve success has made us forget our relationships. Hatred, jealousy and materialism guide our actions. This in turn hampers the development of our inner self. Therefore, for the achievement of a higher, inner self it is essential to have a healthy mind. This can be accomplished by encouraging positive thoughts in our mind and exercising self-control. Negative thoughts should completely be averted. This is what will lead us to choose the correct path.

Self-control has at many times, been linked with various religious purposes. Actually, this is not true. There is no condition laid that only a religious person is capable of self-control. Almost each one of us employs self-control in our daily chores without even realizing it. For instance, if a student is preparing for his exam that is to be held, the next day and he is feeling sleepy, then he will control his urge and postpone sleeping, as he knows that he still has a lot to do in a short time. Thus, one can control his or her urge for a temptation in many ways. Hypnosis is the most widely known of the techniques of self-control. This refers to a method in which a patient is put in a sleepy condition and the conversation, which then takes place between the doctor, and the patient reveals the fears in the mind of the patient to the doctor. This helps the doctor analyze the cause of the patient’s problem and suggest a solution to it. This further tranquil the mind of an individual and give him a healthy mind which will be helpful for self-control.

Another proven technique of self-control is the emotional motivation of an individual. This refers to a method in which a person’s actions are performed according to the way he is being convinced. A person who is encouraged more towards the positive things will be convinced for it to be a better option to achieve success. Whereas, a person who is more inclined towards the negative things will think it to be the correct path of accomplishing his victory.

Neuro-linguistic programming is the method of self-control that deals with the intermingling of verbal language, actions and thoughts which enables us to view reality in a better way. This effectively brings about a change in the perception and attitude of an individual and guides him to the right path. This will encourage him towards an optimistic outlook in life and improves his will power that aids in self-control.

Amendment in the behaviour of an individual is one of the most ancient methods, which are used by the psychiatrists. It instils positive thinking and averts the negative ideas in the mind of a person. This makes him fight the obstacles that he may have to face on the way of triumph and accomplish his desired goals. This also makes him recognize and emphasize on his aims in life and divert all his efforts and energy towards attaining it.

However, for this victory he will have to curb his desires and control himself, not to be carried away by his temptations in life. This way will also contribute to his self-development. Self-awareness is the process that enables us to analyze our vices and virtues. A person should try to reduce his vices and add on to his virtue, which enhances the development of his own self. Self-control is a method that will add on to the virtues of an individual and thereby in his self-development. It also brings out the hidden talent and increases the confidence level of a person. Cultivate your will to listen to body talks that assist you with developing self-control.

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Your body talks to you. Despite that, the body talks most people fail to heed warning signs and go about doing the opposite of what the body needs to survive healthy.

We all have the capacity to understand the body language, talk and functions that we express each day. By understanding, what your body says you can regulate self and decide what is best for your body. One of the techniques we can consider is a scientific, neuropathy test.

Touch your skin. Mention a technique you want to try out to cultivate self-control. Notice the response of your skin. If your skin weakens then the technique you choose will not work. On the other hand, if your skin feels strong then the technique you have chosen will assist you with cultivating self-control. Always pay close attention when you conduct this scientific test for the best results.

Body talk gives us the ability to test our physiology changes and reactions. Self-examines is one of the ways that we can regulate and monitor our body talk and physiology responses. When you focus, go inside your mind and body, you can actually diagnose self or discover barriers that hold you back from cultivating self-control. The higher planes of awareness you develop of self will make it easier with each time you self-examine self to discover answers to major problems you face in self-development.

Try it. Recline and focus on your body and mind. Allow you to enter the mind and explore your human responses and functions. Practicing this procedure daily will take you to higher planes of consciousness one can imagine. However, you should learn about the body and mind to some extent to use self-examining techniques to cultivate self-control. By developing a higher plane of consciousness, you cultivate traits of self-control, which include your perceptions, awareness and self-realization.

Having an overall insight to the body and mind’s capabilities will make it possible for you to reach higher planes of development.

Because the competition in today’s world is forever increasing, it has made it harder for us to maintain self-control. We have too much negativity in life that often slow our progress of developing self and control. The world drives people to materials, which causes them to forget their humanly duties to cultivate self-control. For this reason, learning techniques and learning to listen to the body talks, is essential for self-development.

We must avoid hate, jealousy, and the cultivation of greed. All these negativities will lead you to disaster, which robs you of cultivating self-control. Let your body do the talking. When you are confronted with temptation, rather than jump into a situation blindly, take some time to self-examine your thoughts and body talk closely.

By self-examining your thoughts and body talk closely, you will be able to make better decisions, simply because your judgment mind will have control.

We must develop higher planes of inner self-awareness. By staying alert to your surroundings, you can focus on your body talk and thoughts closely while observing others. By observing others you can regulate your influences, which could persuade you to do wrong, regulating them so that you have control over what decisions you make.

Encouraging positive thoughts is possible through self-examining you, which will assist you with exercising self-control also. Negative thoughts are something we want to avert to cultivate self-control. A positive thinker has inner powers that drive him to achieve his or her goals, thus develop self-awareness, the ability to examine self, et cetera and you will cultivate self-control. Listen to your body and mind talk to cultivate your self-control. We all have several steps to take to develop self-control.

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Self-control or self-discipline is significantly important. We live in a world of competitors that push us to develop self-control by taking disciplinary actions. When one lacks control of self or his behaviors, that person will move backwards in the herd of life by de-motivating self.

Impulsive behaviors in our personal and professional life can become hazardous. An entity that learns to manage under pressure can regain his composure. Only when he is incapable of managing under pressure will he find it difficult to employ self-control.

Many people fail to see their full abilities and weaknesses. These people tend to venture into activities that lead them to unhealthy practices. The performance of these people fall short and commonly they will see failure.

Self-realization must be cultivated then to gain self-control. When you realize that some activities are harmful, thus using self-realization and control, you can evade problems by making better decisions.

When one knows his abilities, it helps him to maintain control over situations by handling them effectively. Self-realization and control enables a body to make wise decisions. An entity that exhibits self-control and discipline empowers the emotions and thoughts to take action, when action is needed. He gains a sense of responsibility and self-realization that moves him to acceptance.

Developing self-control requires perseverance and understanding of the present psychological condition of self. Measuring one’s mental structure always works best in a quiet and peaceful environment. Meditation is one of the most effective ways to develop these humane abilities. One can advantage from a self-analysis or through self-assessment.

Practicing meditation, one can accomplish developing self-control through visualization of the inner self by creating a state of calmness. One can learn from his past actions, experiences and events in a balanced manner. It seems as though another person is observing you when you use self-analysis through meditation to develop self-control.

Mediation offers one a simple method of focusing on the past and present. The process will help with promoting concentration. Effectual concentration alone is an essentially important segment of self-assessment, which results in enhanced self-control.

We must take care of the body and mind, which another vital factor in developing self-control. We need to make clear plans and goals. Many entities have tendencies to make essential commitments toward positive change, yet often these people fail to maintain control, which leads to failure.

Self-control gives one the power to maintain, keeping up with the commitments one has prepared. Expectations however should be regulated. One must not expect more than he must or she can handle. Setting realistic goals and expectations, makes it easier to achieve the goals.

We must learn to plan long-term. Keep up with our plans while setting long-term goals will assist with self-control continuance. One must realize that unforeseen occurrences will develop. By recognizing that unforeseen occurrences arise, we can keep focused and in control by creating backup plans that include disaster planning in our long-term goals.

One must build stamina and maintain a calm attitude to develop self-control. Perseverance is the key to assist us with maintaining self-control and self-discipline. We must realize that we will make mistakes. Mistakes is a part of life, yet when you realize that you have the power to learn from your mistakes, only then can you maintain your self-control.

Self-development is a long-drawn out process and it will take time and effort on your part to develop the whole you, which gives you ultimate control. Continue to train your mind to act in a disciplinary way daily and self-control will become easier to obtain. Take your disciplinary action today. We all need balance between emotions and mind to develop self-control.

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The need for self-control can be seen in the lives of many of us out there. We may all think that we are in control of our emotions. And that our lives but there are many issues that show that we are not as in control of ourselves as we may think. There are many issues that we take for granted in life but that relate back to the need for self-control. We often will put our health and our lives at stake for some of the impulses that really highlight and illustrate that we often are beings that are driven by desires, urges and wants rather than needs. We are able to exclude good thought from our minds selectively and are able to disregard what we know in our minds is the right and correct action. At times, we will put our security and safety on the line to fulfil these desires that we know are not the best things for us and lose all self-control.

So you think you are self-controlled. Well the fact of the matter is that no matter how much we believe that we are in control we will always slip as we are only human but we have to make the commitment to ourselves to be in control as much as possible. There are some of us that are battling problems such as obesity and heart disease and much of this is due to our actions. While there are cases where these problems are not linked to our actions, the norm is that they are linked.

If we are able to be more self controlled we will be able to help ourselves when we are facing these problems or even reduce the possibility of these issues arising. We will stick to the diets that are recommended for us and not be persons that are not able to control their intake. We will exercise and try to lead healthy lives. All this is easy to say and harder to do for many of us out there. We are lead by our desires and needs and not by the ability to act logically for our own betterment.

There are other examples of this is the lives of all of us. One example that has become more prevalent in recent years is the fact that there are many persons out there in debt. They have credit card debt that exceeds their ability to repay and often have home mortgages that are refinanced to meet their credit problems. This is not a way to go through life by any means. We are putting our security and the security of our families on the line by living above our means. Circumstances can cause these problems too but most often, we need to show self-control in our spending when it comes to credit card debts.

There are many gamblers out there that are not in control of their urges to wager and bet on the outcome of random events, there are many alcoholics that cannot control the need to drink and many more examples out there. When we let our self-control, slip we are just as bad and should not judge. We need to learn to control our own selves, actions, and thoughts and then perhaps we can be of assistance to others. We have to be conscious of our responsibilities and keep them in mind when we are tempted to act impulsively and on emotion. We may not always succeed in these feats but the more we try the more self controlled we will become and the better equipped to face the next situation.

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The acts of self-consciousness and self-control go hand in hand. The fact is that when we are self-conscious we are better able to exhibit self-control. For many reasons, some people are not aware of self. They may be conscious of self in some areas, but completely devoid of self-awareness, since they lack control of their actions and emotions. Being self-aware is important as it can affect or self-development and progression through life. It is crucial that we are able to be aware of all that we do, say, and know that these things will affect circumstances as well. Self-consciousness is sometimes a good thing, especially if one relates to self-awareness, seeing the benefits.

If we are self-aware, it is less likely that we will act on impulse. It is more likely the case that we will be ready and able to assess a situation properly and show self-control in deciding how to approach the situation. The self-awareness that we possess will therefore directly affect our self-control. It is crucial that we are able to become self-aware persons in order to grab control of our emotions and actions. This can be done in many ways but these depend on the will power of the individual involved and the desire to take control of their lives.

Some of the ways to move the process to self-awareness and self-control along include the need for professional assistance. Many programmes offer techniques to assist in this process. These are offered by many self-development persons and are a good start if we do not have the time or will power to devote to the process on our own. We may not make the time unless we are enrolled in a class or unless we are motivated externally to do so. In these cases, the programmes can be a great starting point.

If we do have some self-control then it is good to try the other option of working on self-awareness and control on our own. Many persons have highlighted the great benefits of the use of meditation. This can assist the individual greatly as it leads the exploration into self and opens the awareness that is needed for better self-control. Meditation has numerous benefits to its users aside from these. It has been reputed to be of assistance in stress relief and the prevention of more serious illnesses such as heart disease and many more. The relaxing effect of meditation and the exploration into self-are able to translate to a better awareness overall and better self control.

The downside of meditation is that it can take a while to reap benefits and there are often persons that will become bored with the process and not give the method the required time to assist them. Meditation is not an overnight fix by any means and can take months and years of dedication for you to achieve all the results. The meditation process requires quiet and peace, which can often be hard for many of us to source. Not all these challenges however stop the fact that it is one of the best ways to grasp control of self and become more self-aware.

There are other factors that can assist and that can lead you down the road to better self-awareness and self-control. There is a lot of information available in self-development sites that show you the importance of self-awareness and self-control to your life. You should not disregard the things that greatly affect the quality of your life. Developing self-control then can assist you with life changes that recur often, thus allowing one to take charge of his life.

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Self-control will better all aspects of our lives, both the professional aspects as well as the personal aspects. Self-control is one of the crucial lessons of self-development and will lead us to becoming better people overall. If we are able to show self-control in many conditions, we will be able to overcome them and avoid the associated stress. It is crucial that we adapt and grow in life and become freshly self-controlled individuals.

Self-control is developed in several ways. Self-control empowers the mind by allowing you to restrain from bad. By developing self-control, one also develops self-discipline, which empowers your strength of mind, giving you the ability to make sound decisions. When you make sound decisions, you are able to live a much healthier and happier life.

Self-control enables you to use self-will and willpower to achieve your goals. Instead of indulging in harmful activities, often you will make a good decision and do what is right. It makes your thinking and emotions easy to manage.

Some of the popular ways to develop self-control is to meditate. Meditation alone has proven to assist people with self-development and self-healing, which are the steps to developing self-control. Go online today and learn some steps in meditation. You may also benefit from other neuropathy solutions, such as yoga. For the most, you want to understand self-control – and how it benefits you.

There is the compulsion in life for humans to be cognizant of their surroundings at all times while staying in control of one’s heart or emotions and actions. Self-control is one of our largely imperative avails that we can enjoy as humans. We need to be freshly responsible for our behaviours and heart or emotions in today’s fast track world. The need then for self-control is growing. There is evidence that in today’s world of freshly desires that people are not in control of self and their actions. The urgent purpose of all humans should be to clinch control of their intellectual self and ultimately take control of all of their emotions and behaviours.

It is up to us as individuals to decide whether we are in control of the conditions in our lives. Only we can decide if we have the power to control these circumstances in most instances or allow these conditions to control us.

Adults have many needs. Some of these needs are filled on compulsions while others arrive from aforethought and deeper thinking. Humans must become intelligent and cognisant to take control of one’s destiny. The future is certainly unnaturally controlled. Despite this fact, we have to consider our self-control by the way that we live our life by reviewing our values, standards and morals. It is supposedly our right to choose our course in life. This is an essentially an abandonment or freewill that we have to choose cleverly. What this means is that compulsions must be regulated constantly.

Humans have five senses. We must compellingly dictate what we render our senses too. Some people are fortunate enough to be, exalted by all these natural senses, yet these people may not always use these senses correctly.

It is up to us to control these senses rather than allow them to control us. Our senses enable us to see, hear, smell, taste and feel or touch. Our senses give us the aptitude to experience life. Yet, one must exhibit control of these senses authentically to be the commandant of self. We have more than our desires and emotions to consider, which ultimately we must analyze to have control and advance into the future successfully.

In some areas of life, we do not have control. The areas we do have control however has been abandoned. Some people live insalubrious lives that exhibit in their immoral behaviours. Self-control provides us the aptitude to feel content in life exclusive of feeling the need to surrender to one’s compulsions or desires. It is possible to live a happy life by achieving balance. At what time we surrender to our urges often we excessively engage in immoral activities. Thus, it is imperative that we are competent to exhibit self-control in our lives.

Utilizing our intellectual mind, we can apply effort to developing self-control. We will have to liberate self from the wanton and needs to ensue, compulsions that we may embrace. As humans, we must convert to aspiration to become clever and aware of our objectives that we choose to live by. The social order these days is one that is controlled by the need for the Almighty Dollar and voracity, or greed. Many people have adapted to cruel and inhumane behaviours and habits, despite these actions lead to destruction.

When people are capable of clinching control over his or her actions and thoughts, only then can he invest power within to stop this wheel of life. Developing self-control hence can restore humane qualities that make you a better person. You have the power within and all it takes is you to take control today to develop your self-control.

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When one deals with receptivity or openness the need for self-control is of greatest importance. Essentially, we all have the ability to control self when confronted with situations in life. Receptivity is a human component that prepares one by allotting them to manage mental aptitudes of needed control. You are able to concentrate on the big picture to take control of your life.

As humans, we have to exhibit self-control when confronted with the many challenges in life. Receptivity works to assist one with directing his attention while withholding judgment of the various aspects of self-control. One can learn to accept what we cannot change and take control of the things that we can change. In a controlled fashion, we all learn from changes that are recurrent in our system and from the conceptions, perceptions that lead to the behaviours that we display. Reforming the conceptions and perceptions is the ultimate start of developing self-control.

One must become open to change. In this dynamic life, changes recur and never remain stable. When one is trapped in the mindset believing he cannot change or adapt to change, thus he is often redirected along a lost course of living.

Thus, we all must accept reality. By accepting reality and change, we can evade the many problems we will face in life. Self-control enables us to manage any problem that we may face. With self-control, one is capable of confronting conflict easier, facing the problems head on.

We all have unique mannerisms that are employed in the managing various situations. Despite that, we are pushed to think on a norm, it is impossible to be normal at all times. The contributions to our needs to be self pushes us to be who we are. At times, we allow our emotions to take control. When emotions take control of our lives, thus the worst results often occur. Receptivity is necessary to assist us with managing these emotions. We need to be clever to confront our problems head on and rationally rather than emotionally. Executing the logic mind when situations arise will enable us to keep in control of our life.

Self-control can assist you when you feel stressed and cannot see the big picture when problems arise. Using self-control one can redirect his thoughts to positive reflections. Staying focused can assist you with minimizing stress. When one is overburdened, it puts up blinders, which ultimately robs you of self-control.

For one to progress we have to open our minds and hearts, by doing so we can stay in control of our emotions and behaviours. We all have forgetful moments, which cause us to focus only on the negatives. This attitude is unhealthy, and often increases stress. When we are in control of our thoughts then we will be able to redirect ourselves to action that is more positive.

When we embrace the concepts of receptivity and self-control then we are able to live and feel throughout our entire bodies. We are able to feel the freedom that we need and are able to enjoy a sense of wholeness and calm. We will no longer show agitation and tension but will be able to approach challenges in life head on and positively. All this will open doors that we thought were previously closed to us. You will be able to enjoy life and live it to the fullest. It is possible to overcome all obstacles in our lives and live freely but with great receptivity and self-control. Benefits will extend into our private lives as well as our professional lives and we will be able to progress as well balanced individuals that are ready and willing to take on all the world has to offer. Develop your consciousness for self-control.

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Emotions in terms of anger, jealousy, happiness and sadness are just some of the aspects of life that one has to deal with. Emotions are a reaction to physical stimuli that the mind perceives. The intensity of the emotions depends upon the strength of the stimuli. Usually when the mind is threatened by too much intensity of a stimuli it has a tendency to react with emotions matching the intensity of the stimulus. Thus, it becomes necessary to regulate emotions so that they do not prove detrimental to the self.

Your emotional intelligence or the E.I. quotient measures the ability to controlling ones emotions in a stressful situations. It particularly seeks to monitor your anger and depression to enable your self-control over these emotions. The self is dependent upon the mind and emotions as the perfect balance between the mind and the emotions actually determines the well-being of the self.

To explain the self-dynamics it is important to understand how mind and emotions function together. The mind is the realm of logic and reasoning. It is the theoretical basis of making a sound judgment in order to achieve goals or objectives successfully. Emotional judgment is often inaccurate and may not lead the individual to achieve the goal. Therefore, whenever making a decision it is necessary to maintain mind over emotions. No matter how strong ones anger is against a particular person or situation, in a formal setting like the office environment it is necessary to maintain a sense of peace and calm as regarding your emotions. The self is represented through your personality, so if you have a balance between your mind and emotions you should be able to enjoy a stress free life. This would enable you to express your self much more optimistically and develop a positive sense of development.

Since the mind plays a key role is directing emotions to a positive direction, one may ask as to how to we strengthen the faculties of the mind? The answer is just one keyword i.e. healthy living. Living a healthy lifestyle is not only conducive to the development of the mind for controlling your self, but a healthy lifestyle is characteristic of the development of a positive mind set. Thus, it is the first step that one takes to controlling the self. Healthy living means adequate nutrition, exercise, positive social relationships and time management.

Firstly, in terms of nutrition it is necessary to eat a healthy balanced diet that is full of proteins, fats, vitamins and carbohydrates. One must control eating habits. Eating junk foods or other unhealthy foods rich in fat causes imbalances. Food is the true essence when it comes to testing your self-control capabilities. Sometimes it is necessary to go on a diet to allow your digestive system to relax. Try to substitute caffeinated drinks such as tea, coffee and fizzy drinks with fruits, in order to improve your concentration and ability to handle stress much better.
Secondly, Exercise plays an important part of controlling yourself. In particular, mental exercise enhances your mind and enables greater control over emotions.

Alternative forms of exercise such as yoga can enable improved concentration, thus strengthening the faculties of the mind and enhancing greater self-control.

Thirdly, one should always be up for social relationships. Loneliness is one of the major causes of depression, which leads the individual into a negative self-concept about himself. By being socially aware a person develops, a sense of positive self-concept about himself and the interactions amongst peers creates a social value amongst his social circle.

Therefore, in order to achieve self-control it is necessary to maintain a balance between your mind and emotions in order to be able to achieve goals without any stress or anxiety. Seeking balance is easy when you develop E.I.

ScienceDaily (Jan. 18, 2010) — Before patting yourself on the back for resisting that cookie or kicking yourself for giving in to temptation, look around. A new University of Georgia study has revealed that self-control — or the lack thereof — is contagious.

In a just-published series of studies involving hundreds of volunteers, researchers have found that watching or even thinking about someone with good self-control makes others more likely exert self-control. The researchers found that the opposite holds, too, so that people with bad self-control influence others negatively. The effect is so powerful, in fact, that seeing the name of someone with good or bad self-control flashing on a screen for just 10 milliseconds changed the behavior of volunteers.

“The take home message of this study is that picking social influences that are positive can improve your self-control,” said lead author Michelle vanDellen, a visiting assistant professor in the UGA department of psychology. “And by exhibiting self-control, you’re helping others around you do the same.”

People tend to mimic the behavior of those around them, and characteristics such as smoking, drug use and obesity tend to spread through social networks. But vanDellen’s study is thought to be the first to show that self-control is contagious across behaviors. That means that thinking about someone who exercises self-control by regularly exercising, for example, can make your more likely to stick with your financial goals, career goals or anything else that takes self-control on your part.

VanDellen’s findings, which are published in the early online edition of the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, are the result of five separate studies conducted over two years with study co-author Rick Hoyle at Duke University.

In the first study, the researchers randomly assigned 36 volunteers to think about a friend with either good or bad self-control. Those that thought about a friend with good self-control persisted longer on a handgrip task commonly used to measure self-control, while the opposite held true for those who were asked to think about a friend with bad self-control.

In the second study, 71 volunteers watched others exert self-control by choosing a carrot from a plate in front of them instead of a cookie from a nearby plate, while others watched people eat the cookies instead of the carrots. The volunteers had no interaction with the tasters other than watching them, yet their performance was altered on a later test of self-control depending on who they were randomly assigned to watch.

In the third study, 42 volunteers were randomly assigned to list friends with both good and bad self-control. As they were completing a computerized test designed to measure self-control, the computer screen would flash the names for 10 milliseconds — too fast to be read but enough to subliminally bring the names to mind. Those who were primed with the name of a friend with good self-control did better, while those primed with friends with bad self-control did worse.

In a fourth study, vanDellen randomly assigned 112 volunteers to write about a friend with good self-control, bad self-control or — for a control group — a friend who is moderately extroverted. On a later test of self-control, those who wrote about friends with good self-control did the best, while those who wrote about friends with bad self-control did the worst. The control group, those who wrote about a moderately extroverted friend, scored between the other two groups.

In the fifth study of 117 volunteers, the researchers found that those who were randomly assigned to write about friends with good self-control were faster than the other groups at identifying words related to self-control, such as achieve, discipline and effort. VanDellen said this finding suggests that self-control is contagious because being exposed to people with either good or bad self-control influences how accessible thoughts about self-control are.

VanDellen said the magnitude of the influence might be significant enough to be the difference between eating an extra cookie at a party or not, or deciding to go to the gym despite a long day at work. The effect isn’t so strong that it absolves people of accountability for their actions, she explained, but it is a nudge toward or away from temptation.

“This isn’t an excuse for blaming other people for our failures,” vanDellen said. “Yes, I’m getting nudged, but it’s not like my friend is taking the cookie and feeding it to me; the decision is ultimately mine.”

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Self-respect is the root of discipline: The sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. ~Abraham Joshua Heschel, The Insecurity of Freedom: Essays on Human Existence, 1967

Not being able to govern events, I govern myself, and apply myself to them, if they will not apply themselves to me. ~Michel de Montaigne, Essays, 1588

How like herrings and onions our vices are in the morning after we have committed them. ~Samuel Taylor Coleridge

The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on, or blame. The gift is yours – it is an amazing journey – and you alone are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins. ~Bob Moawad

I have been my own disciple and my own master. And I have been a good disciple but a bad master. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

Discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs tons. ~Author Unknown

Everyone must choose one of two pains: The pain of discipline or the pain of regret. ~Jim Rohn

All men are tempted. There is no man that lives that can’t be broken down, provided it is the right temptation, put in the right spot. ~Henry Ward Beecher,Proverbs from Plymouth Pulpit, 1887

The cyclone derives its powers from a calm center. So does a person. ~Norman Vincent Peale

It is a man’s own mind, not his enemy or foe, that lures him to evil ways. ~Buddha

The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. ~Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891

You must admit you have self-control before you can use it. ~Carrie Latet

What makes resisting temptation difficult for many people is they don’t want to discourage it completely. ~Franklin P. Jones

Do you really think it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations which it requires strength, strength and courage to yield to. ~Oscar Wilde

It’s all right letting yourself go, as long as you can get yourself back. ~Mick Jagger

I bid you conquer in your warfare against your four great enemies, the world, the devil, the flesh, and above all, that obstinate and perverse self-will, unaided by which the other three would be comparatively powerless. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

I am,
indeed,
a king,
because I know how
to rule myself.
~Pietro Aretino, 10 May 1537

You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage – pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically – to say ‘no’ to other things. And the way to do that is by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside. The enemy of the ‘best’ is often the ‘good.’ ~Stephen Covey

If we resist our passions, it is more because of their weakness than because of our strength. ~François, duc de La Rochefoucauld

For every man there exists a bait which he cannot resist swallowing. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

The first attribute that characterizes the greater man from the moron is his thicker layer of inhibition. ~Martin H. Fischer

Heaven is on the other side of that feeling you get when you’re sitting on the couch and you get up and make a triple-decker sandwich. It’s on the other side of that, when you don’t make the sandwich. It’s about sacrifice…. It’s about giving up the things that basically keep you from feeling. That’s what I believe, anyway. I’m always asking, “What am I going to give up next?” Because I want to feel. ~Jim Carrey, from a Michael Fleming interview in the March 2004 issue of Playboy magazine

An element of abstention, of restraint, must enter into all finer joys. ~Vida D. Scudder

Conscience whispers, but interest screams aloud. ~J. Petit-Senn

Not using faults does not mean that one does not have them. ~Antonio Porchia,Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

The trouble with resisting temptation is it may never come your way again. ~Korman’s Law

Who is fit to govern others?
He who governs himself.
You might as well have said: nobody.
~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

There is no allurement or enticement, actual or imaginary, which a well-disciplined mind may not surmount. The wish to resist more than half accomplishes the object. ~Charlotte Dacre, The Passions, 1811

Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch. ~Robert Orben

Nothing makes it easier to resist temptation than a proper bringing-up, a sound set of values – and witnesses. ~Franklin P. Jones

About the only time losing is more fun than winning is when you’re fighting temptation. ~Tom Wilson

There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable. ~Mark Twain

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook beneath it. ~Thomas Jefferson

We like slipping, but not falling; our real anxiety is to be tempted enough. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827

If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins. ~Benjamin Franklin

A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is…. A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in. ~C.S. Lewis

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell. ~Author Unknown

You are a puppet, but in the hands of the infinite, which may be your own. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943, translated from Spanish by W.S. Merwin

Abstainer, n. A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary, 1911

I am medical doctor and hypnotherapist with more than 17 years experience. Feel free to send me email (guide.rehab@gmail.com) to discuss your situation.

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The scientific community is increasingly coming to realize how central self-control is to many important life outcomes. We have always known about the impact of socioeconomic status and IQ, but these are factors that are highly resistant to interventions. In contrast, self-control may be something that we can tap into to make sweeping improvements life outcomes.

If you think about the environment we live in, you will notice how it is essentially designed to challenge every grain of our self-control. Businesses have the means and motivation to get us to do things NOW, not later. Krispy Kreme wants us to buy a dozen doughnuts while they are hot; Best Buy wants us to buy a television before we leave the store today; even our physicians want us to hurry up and schedule our annual checkup.

There is not much place for waiting in today’s marketplace. In fact you can think about the whole capitalist system as being designed to get us to take actions and spend money now – and those businesses that are more successful in that do better and prosper (at least in the short term). And this of course continuously tests our ability to resist temptation and exercise self-control.

It is in this very environment that it’s particularly important to understand what’s going on behind the mysterious force of self-control.

Several decades ago, Walter Mischel started investigating the determinants of delayed gratification in children. He found that the degree of self-control independently exerted by preschoolers who were tempted with small rewards (but told they could receive larger rewards if they resisted) is predictive of grades and social competence in adolescence.

A recent study by colleagues of mine at Duke demonstrates very convincingly the role that self control plays not only in better cognitive and social outcomes in adolescence, but also in many other factors and into adulthood. In this study, the researchers followed 1,000 children for 30 years, examining the effect of early self-control on health, wealth and public safety. Controlling for socioeconomic status and IQ, they show that individuals with lower self-control experienced negative outcomes in all three areas, with greater rates of health issues like sexually transmitted infections, substance dependence, financial problems including poor credit and lack of savings, single-parent child-rearing, and even crime. These results show that self-control can have a deep influence on a wide range of activities. And there is some good news: if we can find a way to improve self-control, maybe we could do better.

Where does the skill of self –control come from?So when we consider these individual differences in the ability to exert self-control, the real question is where they originate – are they differences in pure, unadulterated ability (i.e., one is simply born with greater self-control) or are these differences a result of sophistication (a greater ability to learn and create strategies that help overcome temptation)?

In other words, are the kids who are better at self control able to control, and actively reduce, how tempted they are by the immediate rewards in their environment, or are they just better at coming up with ways to distract themselves and this way avoid acting on their temptation?

It may very well be the latter. A hint is found in the videos of the children who participated in Mischel’s experiments. It’s clear that all of the children had a difficult time resisting one immediate marshmallow to get more later. However, we also see that the children most successful at delaying rewards spontaneously created strategies to help them resist temptations. Some children sat on their hands, physically restraining themselves, while others tried to redirect their attention by singing, talking or looking away. Moreover, Mischel found that all children were better at delaying rewards when distracting thoughts were suggested to them. (You can see a modern recreation of the original Mischel experiment here.)

A helpful metaphor is the tale of Ulysses and the sirens. Ulysses knew that the sirens’ enchanting song could lead him to follow them, but he didn’t want to do that. At the same time he also did not want to deprive himself from hearing their song – so he asked his sailors to tie him to the mast and fill their ears with wax to block out the sound – and so he could hear the song of the sirens but resist their lure. Was Ulysses able to resist temptation? No, but he was able to come up with a strategy that prevented him from acting on his impulses.

It seems that Ulysses and kids ability to exert self-control is less connected to a natural ability to be more zen-like in the face of temptations, and more linked to the ability to reconfigure our environment (tying ourselves to the mast) and modulate the intensity by which it tempts us (filling our ears with wax).

If this is indeed the case, this is good news because it is probably much easier to teach people tricks to deal with self-control issues than to train them with a zen-like ability to avoid experiencing temptation when it is very close to our faces.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR(S)

Dan Ariely is the James B. Duke professor of Psychology and Behavioral Economics at Duke University and the author of two wonderful books (according to his mother): Predictably Irrational and The Upside of Irrationality.

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here is a limit to willpower. Psychologist Roy Baumeister asked some people to eat radishes while trying to solve a difficult puzzle, while others received freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. The radish eaters lasted half as long as those eating the cookies. This study explains why many of us tend to gain weight as students, or drink during difficult times. We’ve used up our willpower on meeting the challenge of must-do activities, and have little will left to cope with temptation. Here’s how to overcome this problem.

Instructions

1

Understand the emotional limits of self control. We sometimes use the expression “I feel drained.” This feeling is more than being tired. It is a recognition that we’ve tapped the last of our resources, that we need to replenish. If you look at the term “recreation” in its truest sense, it means that we are finding the emotional space to re-create our personalities to tackle the challenges we face. It’s a different concept from relaxation, which is closer to exhalation in what it does for us physiologically. To avoid exhausting our self control, it makes sense to limit the number of demanding tasks we undertake at the same time. Think of it as drawing on a limited willpower budget.

2

Grasp the biology of willpower. According to Sandra Aamodt, the editor of Nature Neuroscience, and Professor Sam Wang at Princeton, planning and self control are two mental activities directly linked to small changes in blood sugar. In a different study, subjects who drank a glass of sugared lemonade between two tasks requiring willpower did equally well on each, while those who drank sugarless lemonade made more errors on the second task. It’s a trick endurance athletes have employed for years to rise to their challenges by drinking glucose-rich Gatorade.

3

Learn how this realization applies to a real life challenge. Let’s take limiting food intake as a example of a challenge that most of us should now tackle. Since dieting requires willpower, these two studies explain why diets fail so often. They are very hard to start or maintain in tough times. This finding explains the origin of the term “comfort food,” which emphasizes neither taste nor nutrition, but emotional fulfillment. If you can focus your willpower on a diet, the key to success is in finding a way to maintain a constant level of blood sugar while restricting calories. Higher protein diets, like The Zone or Atkins, incorporate food that is more slowly digested than a diet with a larger percentage of carbohydrates, forestalling hunger longer. Unfortunately, according to the scientific evidence, the Atkins Diet is not conducive to long term heart health.

4

Balance tasks that require willpower with the joys in achieving them. Take mountain climbing as a metaphor. At first the trail is demanding, without immediate reward, yet willpower alone can carry us up the slope, until we reach the first view. This is the time to take a breather and relax while we replenish our energy, to soak in the emotional reward of the path that we are taking. Only by balancing joy, relaxation and recreation can we ever hope to muster the willpower to achieve the most from our lives.

Being successful is largely about gaining control over some aspects of the external world. But it’s difficult to do that until you’ve got control over the internal world of yourself. In life, the strength of your self-discipline very often determines the likelihood of your success. Because of that, self-control is a skill worth developing.

And it is just another skill that can be practiced and improved upon – like tennis, playing the piano or programming a computer.

You can see evidence of this simply by watching children. Most of them have terrible self-control. They squirm, lose their tempers, and do the wrong thing no matter how much you threaten or reward them not to. A cookie jar and an adult with a turned-back is all it takes to shatter any child’s self-discipline.

Yet even the most organized adult once went through the emotional roller-coaster of childhood. Just like a golf pro who once had never held a club until he started training, disciplined people coach themselves in the methods of power over the self.

Here are some simple exercises you can do if you need to build up your own willpower.

Drop a small bad habit
I went to the dentist for a check-up a couple of years ago and found I’d developed my first ever cavity. The dentist asked me if I’d been eating anything sweet. The only thing I could think of was the teaspoon of sugar I added to my twice-daily cup of tea. Apparently, doing this coats the teeth in sugar and leads to cavities.

No problem, I simply stopped putting sugar in my tea. At first, it didn’t taste as nice, but now I actually prefer it that way.

This is an example of dropping a small bad habit. Other examples include giving up a regular afternoon snack, pressing the snooze button on the alarm clock, or having one too many coffees a day. Giving up something small but significant is great self-discipline practice.

Learn something boring but useful
Most people skip learning important skills simply because doing so is boooorrrrrriiiing. Consider skills like grammar, punctuation, financial literacy, technical skills and the like. I’m sure you can think of at least one such skill that you could do with brushing up on.

Go down to the library or bookstore and pick up a book on the topic you choose. Make sure it’s something necessary that you have a distaste for. Now read that book all the way through within the next week.

Do something you know you should every day for a week
We all have things we know we should be doing but aren’t. Perhaps for you it’s regular exercise, household chores, or getting up earlier. Choose one such activity and set a week where you’ll do it for a set amount of time every day. Make a rule with yourself that for every day you miss, you’ll add two days to the end of that week.

Set yourself an achievable, but difficult goal with a date for reaching it
Build yourself a willpower game around a particular goal. Perhaps it could be giving up smoking, losing a certain amount of weight, or reading a particular number of books. Organized events such as fun-runs are also good.

Make sure it’s something that’s reachable with a high level of certainty (such as quitting smoking) as long as your will holds. In other words, no external events other than your own self-discipline should be able to have a major impact.

Developed a single-minded focus on achieving that goal by the set date. Don’t let yourself pass the day without reaching it.

Have a month where you ban yourself from putting anything off
Every day we get tasks which can be done immediately, but usually aren’t. Good examples are paying the bills, emptying the dishwasher, or starting a college assignment. Put aside a month where you’ll refuse to allow yourself to put such things off. As soon as the task becomes known, force yourself just to do it. Don’t allow yourself to wait for even five minutes before getting started, and get the task finished as soon as is humanly possible.

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Self control is the ability to control one’s feelings, emotions, impulses, and reactions. Effects of self control are seen everywhere, you can see it in the wealth of the people, winners medals, good habits, strong relationships, a beautiful music, magnificent buildings, and the personal mastery in any fields. Emerson once said, “Nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm.” We could paraphrase that by saying nothing great was ever accomplished without self control.
A recent study was conducted by Avshalom and colleagues at Duke University demonstrates the role of self control in people’s futures. In this study, the researchers have followed a cohort of 1,000 children for thirty two years; they showed that individuals with lower self-control experienced destructive outcomes in physical health, substance dependence, personal finances, and even crime. These results shows that self-control is a key factor that shapes the future of people. Also self control has main role in addictive behavior recovery, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), depression, and bipolar disorder. The good news is that you can learn self control skill as other arts.How to Improve Your Self-Control1. See the big picture

Why do you want to be master in self-control?
Where are you going with self-control?
Focus on where you want to go. Rumi said:” don’t look at your beautiful and ugly face, look at your love and goal. So, it’s not important where you are, but it’s important where you are going. When you focus on long term goal, the tolerate pain become easier, because paying attention to your goal increases your motivation.

2. Select self control as priority value

Values are our internal criteria for what is good, favorable, beautiful, necessary, important, etc.
When you put the tolerate pain as outstanding value in your mind, then the tolerating pain along with a reward for your brain. Therefore, to sacrifice short-term pleasures not only became easy, but also being enjoyable.3. Be patient with yourself

Rome was not built in a day. Self control art takes a while to develop. The achievementof mastery in self control as other arts requires weeks and months of hard work on yourself.
Make self control skill as part of your daily routine. You can start from the easy issues. Each event in daily li

fe activitiescan be a practice for self control. Rumi said:” every moment two voices come; hearing every sound is dependent on your readiness!The first voice says: I’m present, another voice says: look at the end of me!Everyone sees closer who is more rejected; everyone sees farther who is more prosperous