Muslims cant win with htese people. It's a lot like the Jews with anti-semites: theyre damned if they do and damned if they dont. If they open a shop or start a business, it's to "use our freedoms against us in Jihad". If they go to school or run for a seat in the government, theyre using our freedoms and laws against us to enforce Sharia... And so it goes on and on.... Ridiculous.

Can't we just assume everyone who says Obama is a Muslim is just being a very unoriginal Poe? Surely these people don't exist outside the internet where they can make wild accusations totally anonymously.

The real Jesus, of course, is a handy little sockpuppet with a love of guns and money. And he has an adorable little hatred of anything without white skin, those who don't care for evangelism, those who are afflicted with a vagina [and even worse: those without a vagina who aren't interested in any themselves!], and those people who would DARE to believe scientific consensus over what he tells you to believe! If you hear it when he tells you that evolution is a farce and that a few dozen cells deserve to be treated like a person, you better believe him, or somebody's kneecaps are in for some serious hurtin'. You DO NOT FUCK with Puppet Jesus. Comprende? Alright, let's get trashed on some "Savior blood," say a few prayers and call it an evening.

OK. If you say so, you're obviously an expert on deranged religions. But what's that got to do with President Obama? Anyone would swear that he's personally persecuting the Rapture Ready site or something.

Hint: If you want to pray for people to search for Jesus, then pray they go to the parts of the world where sickness, poverty and malnutrition hold sway. He's not to be found in the lands of the lard arses much these days.