1. a handshake so forceful it almost goes rogue
2. Birdman messing with his chair while people are talking to him
3. tons of alternately dickish and hilarious one-word answers
4. beard scratchin’
5. “birdlike” being declared not a word

It manages to be intensely awful and charmingly hilarious at the same time. It’s the LeBron James’ shoe leaving skidmarks of postgame interviews and I want to nominate Birdman for all-times postgame interviewee.