At Least One Person Enjoyed Getting Screwed By Sam Israel

I know we've all become pretty attached to (obsessed with, fallen head over heels for) former hedge fund manager Sam Israel, as we've observed the lovable scamp's hilarious hijinx and pratfalls over the last five months. Since he hit the scene in June, wowing us with his commitment to M*A*S*H by incorporating a line from the series into his fake suicide note, we've had a list of questions we've always promised ourselves we'd ask if we ever got the chance to sit down with the Bayou founder. They included but certainly were not limited to 1. I know the bird on your business card is an egret but some fools think it's a pelican. Please set the record straight now. 2. When did you first realize you were attracted to Alan Alda. 3. Tell us about your sex life, specifically with Debra Ryan, the woman who tried (and failed) to help you escape. Today we can cross #3 off our list. Ryan is featured in the latest issue of lady mag Marie Claire discussing, among other things, what she describes as the "crazy sex" she and Israel got into in his pre-prison dodging days. I'm going to grab a copy of MC later but I'm going to leave you with this, as it is so obviously a fantastic way to start the morning: According to g-friend, Israel was "a joker [who] liked to sneak up on her, once while wearing sunglasses on his penis [which only contributed to] a blazing sex life...the best ever." And apparently, Ryan's not over Sam, even though he's clearly moved on to birds. "I should just see it at face value and say he [screwed] me," she noted. "But I can't let go." And really, can you blame her?

Remember Debra Ryan? For those who need a refresher, she was the woman behind the man that was Sam Israel III, the hedge fund manager who, with the help of DR, faked his own death in 2008 to avoid the prison time that was coming his way as a result of scamming investors in the Bayou Group out of $450 million. Several months after Israel was caught, Ryan penned an article for Marie Claire, explaining that she'd gone to great, illegal lengths to help him stay out of the big house because of all the "blazing sex life" they had, which see wasn't ready to give up. Though she was clearly not ready to move on ("I should just see it at face value and say he [screwed] me," she noted. "But I can’t let go") one would have thought that time and the three years probation Ryan was sentenced to would have helped her get over the guy who used to sneak up on her "while wearing glasses on his penis." Apparently, though, such is not the case, as evidenced by Debra's contribution to a new book about Israel by Guy Lawson called Octopus, in which we learn that she is still carrying a torch for the guy the burns nearly as the fire in both their loins. "The next morning was Debra's birthday. She and Sam woke and made love-passionate, frantic, intense love. But as soon as they joined up with the Nicholses the atmosphere turned claustrophobic once again. Debra wanted alone time with Sam. But the Nicholses wouldn't leave them be for even a moment. Left with no choice, the two couples went for a stroll through the historic section of Zurich...wandering the old city was pleasant and exciting for Ryan. "I was starting to have a nice time," Ryan recalled. "Sam always wanted to spend money on me but I wouldn't let him. but this time he took me to a nice clothing store and bought me a bunch of new clothes. He was a great shopper- he could pick out clothes from the rack and they'd fit me perfectly. As we walked in one store, Sam turned me around and grabbed my face and kissed me with so much passion. We started to make out in the store, on the spur of the moment. I had never done that before, and I have never done it since. It was the best kiss ever." Octopus: Sam Israel, the Secret Market, and Wall Street's Wildest Con [Amazon] Related: Claim: Sam Israel’s Investors Gave Him Money Because They Liked Animal-Loving Cokeheads Who Looked Good In Women’s Underwear And Cowboy Boots Related: Hedge Fund Manager Who Faked His Own Death Has A Few Theories About Other Famous Murders, Real And Imaginary