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Just one other little note. I asked my priest if it was selfish to pray for my marriage to be restored and he said no, it isn't. That is something God created and we should want our marriage's to be restored. It is what is best for families.

Kevin, let me say it another way, although I don't know why I am, because I know it won't make any difference...

YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH HER. IMO, she has ceased to even be a person in your mind, she is an object you are obsessed with having. Furthermore, your expectations seem to be that of six year old!

I have HAD someone obsessed with me. Even a restraining order could not get through to this person that I DID NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. He could go through pages and pages of why that was unreasonable of me, and whose fault it was. He could not accept that I DID NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. He thought God thought we should be together.

Even after going to court he found me in public and asked me if I could just "forgive" him and come back.

THIS is how you are acting!!!!!!

It's not selfish to pray for your family to be restored. But after a YEAR you are not accepting that your wife DOES NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP with you. If you want to "stand" forever, then do so, but ACCEPT that she is set on her course right now.

And, no, she is not going to offer to ML on your birthday, and the fact that you said you aren't going to ask for it, which would be insane at this point, tells me you are indeed THINKING OF ASKING. I hope you don't.

Why don't you take this new closeness to God and serve him for a while and STOP OBSESSING. If you CAN'T STOP OBSESSING you need a doctor. Like yesterday.

It is not like I am constantly thinking about her. I just simply rehashed some things that have happened lately in the past few months. But if I post anything about her at all... OMG!!! I am mentally stocking her.

I am standing for our covenant marriage. And I do know that it is God's will for it to be restored. And I do hope my W's heart softens eventually. God created marriage. 1 man and 1 woman for life. He made us one flesh partners when we got married. He does not support divorce. I am not going to go into the whole spill again.

He does expect us to forgive each other and always work on our marriage. He says it is ok for us to separate for a time and pray and then he tells us to come back together.

All this aside, I know very well where I stand in my covenant marriage at this time.

There are 3 reasons why I want her back in any particular order. Here they are.

1) I don't want my kids having to finish growing up in a broken home. That isn't fair to them. Plus, D continues to set a precedence in the family if this happens and can very well affect their own future M's.

2) I don't want my W living in adultery which is what she will be doing if she decides to remarry another man. I don't want her to have to face judgement for that. I worry about her.

3) I do love her and care about her and I do miss her. Our family is very important and special. It just needs to be recessitated in whatever God's timing is.

I think you just re-enforced everyone's idea that you really need to let go let God.

"I don't want my W living in adultery which is what she will be doing if she decides to remarry another man. I don't want her to have to face judgement for that. I worry about her."

This isn't about what YOU want. It's what SHE wants. If she wants to live in eternal sin, then that's HER choice. It sucks but it is HER choice. Change that thinking. It's stuff like that that make you SOUND like a stalker. Geez no one said you were. We said you were beginning to sound like one.

It's the obsessive thinking for the object of desire that is the basis of stalking.