Match.com's Recipe for the Safest Boston Date Ever

Match.com recently¬†surveyed 1,000 Boston singles to get “a pulse on the Beantown dating scene.” We’re not so sure about this sample set of theirs, but we figured we’d use the most popular responses to their questions about dating preferences to give you a guide to the safest bet (read: most cliched choices)¬†when arranging for a Boston date. (First thing’s first: Do not call it the “Beantown dating scene” in the presence of others. Okay, onward!)

Step 1: Head to Liberty Hotel to pick up a date for the night. (Apparently 67 percent of respondents ranked it the best hotel hangout for finding dates. Also, apparently people pick each other up in hotels.)¬†Be sure to drive there in your Audi. (The preferred car.)

Step 2: (If you are female) Feign a Southern accent. (44.7 percent of the men preferred one.) Say you went to Boston University. (They have the hottest alumna say 38 percent of the men.) If you must pretend to be a fan of a rival sports team, go with the Yankees. (31 percent of men said if they had to date a Boston rival’s fan, they’d date a Yankee-lover.) Oh, also, have a good excuse on hand for how a Southern girl who went to B.U. ended up rooting for the Yankees.

Step 2: (If you are male) Stick with your normal accent. 36.9 percent of women said they want a guy who sounds like them.) Say you went to Boston College. (33 percent of the women like a B.C. guy.) Do NOT say you went to MIT. If you would like to pose as a fan of a rival sports team, pick the Jets or the Giants.

Step 3: Go to dinner in the North End. (Who’s surprised?)

Step 4: Do not say “pissa.”¬†72.8 percent of respondents said it was a turn-off.

Alternatively, did you get set up on a date by your crazy Aunt? Are you certain you’d like this little fling to go nowhere? Here’s how to go on the least popular date:

Step 1: Drive a Ferrari. (2.9 percent wanted their date driving one. Save money and get a Camry, which came out ahead.)

Step 2: Say “pissa” at every occasion.

Step 3: Go on a duck tour. 1.2 percent said it was their favorite date, proving that the couple that quacks together … is extraordinarily lucky they found each other.

Alternatively, quit trying to game the system and take your date out on a night of activities you enjoy, speaking¬†in your natural accent while you do so. Haha, just kidding that’ll never work.