Sunday, May 8, 2011

hay yougaiz!!11 This blog post title is allegedly Yara Sofia’s farewell message when she sashayed away from RuPaul’s DragRace3. I'm not really sure what it means but it looked so foreign and exotic and Latin and stuff that I just HAD to have it yougaiz. So anyway, Raja won DragRace3. Yay for your face Raja! In your honor, we post a Raja gif.

Anyway, is it sidey to post after onemonthbreak to say ohai! I’m taking oneanothermonthbreak also? The answer is yes. Yes it is very sidey to do this. But whatever. Then you know what sprepper is? DragRace3 tells me that sprepper happens when you mix Sprite and Dr. Pepper which is Sweet! But Not Delicious! When you think about it, so many things in life are Sweet! But Not Delicious! I also learned another new word. This another new word is 'scrotching'. I think the person who kept saying this wanted to say ‘scorching’. Like they wanted to say ‘it is scorching day in the outside’. But instead, they are saying ‘it is scrotching day in the outside’. This could prettymuch mean anything yougaiz. But I feel like this could be used when you generally want to say something negative but also want to include crotches and setting things on fire also.

Then what happened means I was interviewed by the highlyillustrious V.V. Ganeshananthan at the Sepia Mutiny. Not only was this fun interview to do, it includes some helpful tips from my booklet How to Write Your Awesome Indian Slum Novel and kind people said nicecomments also which I now keep in the pockets of my heart. And the DheegaDheega song is there also. That in itself makes everything #winning, no? Yes. Yes it does.

Then also, because I think it's important to perpetuate rumors whenever possible, rumor has it that I will have some kind of echapbook happening in the near future. If it happens, you heard it here phust yougaiz. Although I think Blaft posted about it on their blog already but whatever.

Then what happened means I VOTED!!11 Very exciting! I like to vote yougaiz. This was a lot more interesting when it happened and when I thought about it afterwards. It is not so interesting now when I write about it here.

Now, I will take this opportunity to answer some questions. Some of these questions are real, some are fake, some are completely made up and some are Sweet! But Not Delicious!

The only thing missing here is a sparkly unicorn holding up a sign saying ‘I cannot stand the absolute epic that is happening in this picture right now yougaiz’.

2. How Are you Celebrating Short Story Month?

As an alleged short story writer, it behooves me to celebrate this month with pomp and circumstance and aplomb and perspicacity and fortitude and all those kinds of things like that. Primarily, I've decided not to write any short stories during this time. This is like how on Saraswati Puja day you don't touch any books or anything. It's like that yougaiz. Then I thought I should try and read which was phail but was totally #winning in terms of falling asleep with mouth open. Then I thought ok let me listen to free podcasts. This is something I do very well. So here is what I heard yougaiz.

I don't know why these are free. But they are. Which is awesome. These particular podcasts were also read very well which is just #totalwinning yougaiz. Also, it behooves me to share this passage from My Man Jeeves.

"No doubt you read my book, India and the Indians? My publishers are anxious for me to write a companion volume on the United States. I shall not be able to spend more than a month in the country, as I have to get back for the season, but a month should be ample. I was less than a month in India, and my dear friend Sir Roger Cremorne wrote his America from Within after a stay of only two weeks."

Isn't it neat how that was how people did things back then but that totally doesn't happen today? That's so neat yougaiz.

2. The Chink and the Child by Thomas Burke
I'm not linking to this. I don't know why I listened to this either. I remember while listening I kept wanting to ask the narrator, 'How can you keep reading this? Can you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth? Why are you doing this?' That was probably unfair on my part but it was what I felt yougaiz. Anyway, the story is what it is and I guess that's all we can say. Also it is neat to know that with regard to Burke, and I quote from the awesome and illustrious wikipedia, "the majority of his autobiogaphies attest to his supposedly intimate knowledge of lower-class life. These fabricated autobiographies enabled Burke to establish his authority as an expert on the Chinese in London, allowing him to create a persona that he used to market his fictional works on Limehouse. As Witchard notes, Burke, through his writing, positioned himself as a “seer” in an “occult process” of representing London’s sub-cultural ‘Others'." Oh my. Oh my, Oh my, Oh. My.

Oh honey not. So much not. Although on the cover, Thiru IshqBector Avargal seems to have written the word Ishq in big letters on a wall using his own pee which leads me to believe that perhaps he has a massive bladder. Which probs comes in superhandy on long bus rides and things like that. Really feel like one needs to find the positives where one can and celebrate them. Although the pee looks like black spray paint also. I don't think your pee is supposed to look like that. I really don't know what to say now yougaiz.

6. I haven’t read your writing because your kind of writing doesn’t interest me but I do think you should answer my 27 part question regarding your Indian identity crisis.

I’m actually a white dude from Finland. But from far away I look like I have an Indian identity crisis. Also,

stolen from somewhere on jezebel.com

Did you know this dude dances really well to Show Me Your Jalwa? Really he does.He's supertalented yougaiz.

And of course, since today is Mother's Day, a salute to all mothers with this mothering MGR song from Adimai Penn which featured the biggest Amma of all. This is seriously a great song yougaiz. Makes you feel like running and jumping among big rocks in the sun. But not in a scrotching way.

About Me

Kuzhali Manickavel is the author of the short story collections 'Insects Are Just like You and Me except Some of Them Have Wings' and 'Things We Found During the Autopsy', both available from Blaft Publications. She also has an email id and it goes like kuzhali (dot) ehm (at) gmail (dot) com