Most people attend an anger management program because their inability to better manage their anger has created conflict with life partners, family members, employment situations, and commonly enough, the law.

For many who attend anger management, it is perhaps a matter of not having learned the skills necessary to better cope with conflict. This program will help you learn more constructive thought patterns and skills.

For others, anger emerges from long-term conflicts and behaviour patterns. In many cases, these conflicts and behaviours are passed down in families from one generation to the next. These can be deep issues. Learning and practicing the necessary skills of anger management will help you function and think better. Such skills will help you should you consider seeing a counsellor or therapist to better help you identify, manage and resolve your hurts and conflicts.

If there are deeper conflicts a person may react with: anxiety/panic, avoidance, denial, dissociation, emotionally attacking another person, projection, transference.

Some people have just become worn out with resentment, hostility, fighting within themselves, and fighting against the world.

For many people, the issue is dealing toxic people that you have to live and work with.

Short term counselling (within four sessions or so) can be effective when relatively well integrated people (people who effectively cope with the variability of life) are dealing with a specific event or issue.

For most people, life can be absurdly complex and the skills we have learned are no longer constructive.

The skills developed through this program will help you understand your own anger, how other people’s anger affects you and how to more constructively interact with life.

This program is also suitable for people who wish to enhance their life skills for career, and relationship (marriage) success.

Format: This anger management program is a psycho-educational presentation and discussion format. The intent is to teach a better understanding of anger, and skills to more constructively manage this emotion.

Each session begins with a brief review of the material discussed the previous week and how participants have learned to apply the concepts to their daily challenges.

Typically the instructor or each person in turn, will read out loud through the manual. Thus we get to read, see and hear the information. Where there is opportunity, the instructor will elaborate on important points and/or ask participant’s for their input. (If a participant is not comfortable with reading out loud, simply ask to pass or discuss your concerns privately with the instructor).

Homework Assignments: Brief homework assignments will be given each week. As with any type of skill acquisition, anger management requires time and practice. Doing the homework assignments will improve participant’s anger management skills and allow them to get the most from the experience. Homework assignments provide the opportunity for skill development and refinement.

Limitations: Regardless of your reasons for participating in this course, it is up to you to put what you will learn into practice. If you want things to change, it has to start with you. Creating a positive change always begins by changing yourself, that is, your attitudes, the demands you make of yourself and others, developing new skills, and your pattern of interacting with others.

Individual Counselling: This program is well suited to individual counselling and allows more intimate exploration of issues that surface during our discussion. It is also private, subject to the following limitations.

If it is evident that you intend to harm yourself or another person, your facilitator is legally and ethically required to take action to protect the safety of the threatened person. Possible actions could include notifying family or support system, informing the intended victim, and alerting law enforcement.

If there is reason to believe that a child, an elder person, or a dependent adult is subject to abuse and/or neglect, your facilitator is required to report such concerns to Children’s Aid or other legal authority (police).

If the facilitator is ordered by a court order to testify or share records, s/he must do so.

If you name your facilitator in a lawsuit, the law states that s/he can, and sometimes are obligated to reveal information that would otherwise be confidential.

Group Counselling can be a rewarding experience for participants as they learn from each other and often find support from similar situations. Group counselling is typically less expensive, however, it is subject to availability. While group participants are each honour bound to respect each other’s privacy, it must be understood that in a group situation, your facilitator cannot guarantee what is said by others outside of the group sessions, and cannot be held liable for the actions of others.

Couples/Relationship Counselling: When counselling with couples, it may be advantageous to meet with each person individually. It must be understood that your counsellor cannot promise that issues raised by one party will not inadvertently be revealed to the other party. Issues discussed individually that are relevant to the success of the relationship will probably be raised when counselling with the couple resumes. Therefore, if one party has a concern/issue which s/he wishes to remain withheld from their partner, they are advised to seek individual counselling from another professional instead of or in addition to the couple’s counselling.

While the original manual was developed to address anger management specifically, experience with numerous participants supports the material can be readily adapted and applied to stress management; anxiety management; life, business, and relationship skills.

In this program, participants will learn helpful strategies and techniques to manage anger, express anger in alternative ways, change hostile attitudes, and prevent aggressive acts such as verbal abuse and violence.

There is a story wandering about on the topic of "How to Catch a Monkey." I'm not entirely sure if it is true or not, yet the lesson is valid.

Apparently there is an area in Africa where traditional hunters do not use spears, or arrows to catch monkeys. What they do is tie a jar with a narrow neck to a post and put a peanut into the jar. The hunter then hides and waits for a curious monkey to wander by....

Personal freedom: Catching Monkeys.

Eventually a monkey passes by and smells the peanut in the jar. The monkey reaches in with its paw and grasps the morsel. Because the neck of the jar is narrow, the monkey cannot get it's fist, now clenching the treasured peanut, out of the jar. Struggle how it may, the monkey simply won't let go of the peanut and essentially, traps itself. It is then an easy task for the hunter to walk up to the monkey and throw a heavy blanket over its head and take it into captivity... perhaps to be sold to some research lab, or to be sold as bush meat. All the monkey had to do to avoid this fate, was to let go of the tiny treasure in its hand, and it would have regained something even more precious... it's very freedom!

So now comes the lesson.... what is it that you grasp and hold onto that has you trapped and causes you to lose your freedom...perhaps to the point it even defines who you think you are? What would it take to just let it go and regain your freedom?

Dr. Wayne CoghlanA brief biography

My
interest in counselling psychology evolved through my practice as a
chiropractor (registered since 1984). It became apparent to me that
perhaps two thirds of the issues people were presenting with as physical
pain, had their origins or were strongly influenced by emotional
issues. The other 2/3 of issues I would deal with was physical in origin
(that extra third being the overlap between the two). If it seemed a person’s neck pains and headaches had an
emotional component, helping the patient understand the connection would
provide them opportunity to deal more effectively with the underlying
issues. Often, when relieving the physical component of stress
patterns, the emotional component would start to flow. Within the
context of a healing relationship, a patient may feel safe enough and
would appreciate the opportunity to vent a bit of their concerns. As a
health care professional, and having an aptitude for counselling, I
would offer what insights I felt qualified to do so, and/or help direct
the person to a more qualified professional. I was also able to offer
insights I had gained through my own life’s journey and education from
the School of Hard Knocks.Many patients offered their appreciation for what assistance I was able to provide. Recognizing
that there is a need for counselling assistance and my own aptitude, I
pursued formal education to further my insights and gain qualifications
through the Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology program via
Yorkville University.