The fake work excuses - that turn out to be true

Accuse staff of lying at your peril

We've all heard the stories, from the fake doctor's appointment to the dead grandmother: the lies people use to get out of a day's work.

An awful lot of us do it, with a fifth of parents calling in sick for lack of childcare during the six week summer holiday, according to the Family and Childcare Trust.

Bosses know this, and are generally canny at working out when staff are pulling a sickie, and when they genuinely have a good excuse. But they sometimes get it badly wrong, as these examples from Reddit show...

Spawning fish
"'Hey I can't come to work today. My fish is giving birth.' Turns out that fish is extinct in the wild so they're worth quite a bit of money. And they eat their babies if they're left in the tank with them. No wonder they're extinct in the wild."

Sheer stupidity
"Guy said he fell off his bed and had internal bleeding. Turns out he was drunk and trying to change a light bulb, so he put a step ladder on his mattress and tried to use that to reach the light."

Murder
"Woman called in to say she wouldn't be able to work that week. She said 'the police had found her sister's head'. She had to go identify it. Her sister had gone missing months prior. I don't question employees much anymore after that turned out to be true."

Kidnap
"Her family had been kidnapped and held for ransom. That being in Nigeria made it a possibility, and was later confirmed by police statements. They were released eventually after three days, unharmed as I was told. And without a ransom when they realised that a bank employee is not equivalent to a walking ATM."

Unconventional family
"Guy used the excuse that his grandmother died. It was the third time in six months that he used the excuse. When we were getting ready to let him go another manager brought up the fact that he had met all three grandmothers, two were lesbians, earlier in the year."

A gunfight
"I actually gave the excuse. Guy was shot next door, he then drove his car past my house and crashed into my other neighbors tree and then he died from the gunshot wound. The whole street was blocked off because it was a crime scene, my car was right in the middle of it."

An unexpected baby
"'I had a baby on the side of the road...' She was pregnant and didn't know it apparently. It was a healthy baby girl."

A punch-up
"My tiny skinny coworker: 'I can't come in today, a group of guys tried to assault me and I sent two of them to the hospital. I have to file a police report.' I didn't believe until she actually got sued for excessive use of force. Apparently she was black belt in a couple of martial arts."

Treacherous cats
"A coworker said her cat hid her car keys. About a week later I caught one of my cats carrying my car keys around the house."

Funniest late airport arrival excuses

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