Sunday, August 29, 2004

this internet connection really is pissing me off! it's getting suckier and suckier from time to time. i guess i really need that adsl connection coming up to my place. will call the telstra guy tomorrow. and if i don't receive the adsl starter pack by the day after tomorrow, i'm gonna give him an earful of mine. i wonder whether he could stand that. we'll see...

Thursday, August 26, 2004

internet addiction disorder is a psychological disorder which has distressing implication for one's psychological, physical, and social well-being. the symptoms are:

1. they build tolerance on the internet. that is, if they feel the need for more exposure to the internet in order to fell the same amount of satisfaction as with previous as with previous amounts of exposure.

2. they experience withdrawal symptoms after they stop using the internet (including the feelings of anxiety or obsessive thinking about what they are missing online).

3. they find themselves accessing the internet more than they intend to or they accsess it for longer periods of time than they intend to.

4. they have a desire to reduce or have been unsuccessful in reducing internet use.

5. they spend a good deal of time with activities related to the internet (buying internet-related books).

6. they neglect to attend to social, occupational, or recreational activities beacuse of the internet.

7. they continue to use the internet despite and obvious problem with their health, relationship, job, or mental health because of their internet use. *

how many question did you say "YES" to the questions above? it's funny how i didn't say "YES" to any of the questions. however i must admit that i'm such an internet addict. still in a good way though *self defence mechanism, ON* :D

i would say i only addicted to the internet in a good way because, after stuck in this goddamned house because of this stewpid sickness for about a week, i still miss my real life. i miss going out, i miss the weather ( i supposedly celebrate this spring weather), i miss everything. even i miss my school. shhesssh... oh well, i guess i'm just a bit exaggerating here.

Saturday, August 21, 2004

do you know how is it like to listen and writing, well, basically, communicating, not in your mother tounge? well it might be easy for some of you, but it obviously not easy pour moi.

and yup, i still write in indonesian *and think, obviously*, even in a lecture class. i found it's so hard to listen what my lecture said, and write that in english as well. i usually just jot everything down in any language which comes to my mind first. it's sorta like decoding and encoding two languages at the same time. it's almost the same as looking the signifiers without having that signifieds meaning in our mind. get it? don't worry if you don't get that, it's just a lil tiny bit from my everyday communication class. frustrating isn't it? T_T

funny how some people, indonesian as can be, like to brag about how good their english are. what's with NOT speaking english all the time? *bitch mode on*

Friday, August 20, 2004

hey hooo, just a quick copy-and-paste-from-another-website, before i blow my head off due to this illness. don't know why this song keep running thru my head, since i watched bridget jones's diary couple of days ago.

Out of Reach-GabrielleKnew the signsWasn't rightI was stupid for a whileSwept away by youAnd now I feel like a foolSo confused,My heart's bruisedWas I ever loved by you?Out of reach, so farI never had your heartOut of reach,Couldn't seeWe were never meant to beCatch myselfFrom despairI could drownIf I stay hereKeeping busy everydayI know I will be OKBut I wasSo confused,My heart's bruisedWas I ever loved by you?Out of reach, so farI never had your heartOut of reach,Couldn't see
We were never meant to beSo much hurt,So much painTakes a whileTo regainWhat is lost insideAnd I hope that in time,You'll be out of my mindAnd I'll be over youBut now I'm so confused,My heart's bruisedWas I ever loved by you?Out of reach,So far I never had your heartOut of reach,Couldn't see We were never meant to beOut of reach,So far You never gave your heartIn my reach, I can seeThere's a life out thereFor me

so there ya go, pathetic isn't it? a girl who spends the entire weekend just sitting in front of the computer, writing cheesy stuffs, watch cheesy movies and read cheesy flicks. oh well...

Thursday, August 19, 2004

it's just amazing how the jews could still survive the holocaust. hell, i know nothing about holocaust and jews, but i still do think that the holocaust can be seen as one of the darkest sides of human history.

oh i can't just continue writing this entry. still so davastated seeing how one's life can be that priceless.

PS: i'm sick today. sick as ever. in fact this is the first fever i've ever gotten since i live in melbourne. and i hate it cuz that means i can't go to hoobastank concert tonite. i hate it i hate it i hate it.

PPS: and yes, people, i still need your comments on this! thanks a bunch!

so anyway, imma talk about friendster here. i'm sure you're all already aware of what friendster is, and i believe most of you are an active friendster user yourself. now i want to talk about that is about its relation with culture, particularly indonesian culture. actually this is not only my rambling thoughts, cuz i actually am going to write a 3000-words essay about friendster, and how friendster actually is reflecting indonesian culture (and i'm talking about our collective virtues and norms here).

so guys, if you have any thought(s) about friendster, please drop me a message, a comment, or you can email me, of even message me on friendster (if you're in my personal network, that is).

so here are the questions about friendster:
1. are you a friendster user? if so, how long have you been using it?
2. are you addidted to it? why and how?
3. are your friends' profiles affect you on how you write your profile?
4 do you often write testimonial? do you think testimonials important? if so, why?
5. how many friends do you have? do you think by making more friends means you're somewhat more 'attractive' in the real world?
6. what about picture? how often do you change your pictures? what pictures you usually put on friendster?
7. why do you think friendster is so popular in indonesia? how useful is that?
8. have you have any other thoughts on friendster (apart from my questions)?

so there. help me please, cuz i need to write this essay in two weeks time. once again, if you have any other thoughts, or even inquires, just leave comments here, and i'll try my best to get back at you. your help is very much appreciated :)

Sunday, August 15, 2004

i just finished watching love actually for the only-god-knows-how-many-times-i-watched-that-movie, one of the greatest love movies of all time. at least in my opinion though. it's just amazing to see how love works. in overall, i'm gonna quote one of the lines here, 'what is love if not about a total agony?' sheessh i just realised how love can be so devastating, especially if you can't be with the one you love most of the time. talking about the inevitably time n space contraints here.. :(

sorry about my rambling thoughts today, i still dunno how a movie can bring me into this kinda mood i'm having right now...
so here's a song from the movies, for those of you who are in love..

God Only Knows--Beach BoysI may not always love youBut long as there are stars above youYou never need to doubt itI'll make you so sure about itGod only knows what i'd be without youIf you should ever leave meThough life would still go on believe meThe world could show nothing to meSo what good would living do meGod only knows what i'd be without youGod only knows what i'd be without youIf you should ever leave meWell life would still go on believe meThe world could show nothing to meSo what good would living do meGod only knows what i'd be without youquote of my day: 'my wasted heart will always love you' -the guy from love actually-

Friday, August 13, 2004

[the image here has been removed due to a complaint by someone. if you still want to see the image, just holla at me and i'll give you the link. apology for your inconvinience]

hehe this was created by dimpol, one of my best friends back in j-town. the girl in the red shirt was me, taken waaayyy back then, back to the 2002.. i was so thin back then huhuhu T_T
so this is his creation, made with i dunno what and dunno how. so it's so kewl for me. for a person who doesn't know a thing about design graphic at all. so i just love it. love it so much indeed. i thank dimpol sooo much for this. sering2 ya pooolll!! :D

on a completely different topic, i just got back from the city with egi, and we went to max brenner's chocolate bar. oh my goodness, that's the first ultimate chocolate bar i've ever gone to! luv the jargon: brings the chocolate culture to the world. kewl, innit? and the fact that it is indeed brings the culture of chocolate to the world, well, at least for now, to the city of melbourne, really amazed me. now that's what i called innovation. love it once. love it twice. love it thrice. *LOL* a very nice place to hang out for a chocoholic like moi.

and oh, one more thing. my capitalist side took over this arvo. so i bought a shirt at mango. a blue-ish colour. well actually i didn't really like it, but i bought that just to satisty my capitalist passion ^_^ so there goes my extra money for today! T_T no more fancy restaurant and cafes for the rest of the weekend, which is good, since i've decided to stay at home this weekend and sit my ass in front of the computer (not for chatting and browse around the net, but to do my thing on electronic society). yep, i'm gonna do a short essay and am gonna conduct a tiny little survey on friendster. so there, wish me luck people! :)

quote of my day: "hey britney! open up!" egi, pretends to be rachel, whilst buzzing up into my apartment.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

i should be happy for this. but no, i can't be as happy as can be, since he's like three hours away by plane from melbourne. we're in completely different time zone. geez, i wish i was there to celebrate this big day. but hey, this is really not a big day after all, innit? come to think of it, bday is not to celebrate our age addition whatsoever. but i see it merely as a decrease of our actual life, or age, you can say? say, you're gonna die in 40 years from now. with this age addition, that means you're will be over no longer in 40 years, rite? it's now 39 left. so what are you gonna do to fill these years? time flies y'know, it really does... *huwah jadi bingung*

hoho it's just my opinion though. i must have gone mad since i couldn't sleep last nite... geez i really really wish that i was in perth rite now.. this damn distance :(

so yesterday i was trying to make my life a bit more organised. so i was jotting down all of the due dates of my assignments, tasks, presentations, exams, including a long term plan of my self indulgement *talking about concerts and concerts here*. and guess what what i've found? i've found out that i have two freakking essays due date and a deadly presentation on the same week?

so guys, my life gonna be over by the end of this august. see ya guys, thanks for everything you have given me. i'm so dead. >.<

-abis nonton white chicks kemaren sama ndun, it was damn good! you gotta watch it! it was not good 'good',as in so-called sophisticated good, but, it was good in a term of good 'funny'. i'm talking about laughing my ass-off yesterday. hohoho "^_^"v

our internet at home is not working.! >.< according to andin, it's the virus. oh i'm so tired working on virus again. andin said there's no way she's gonna reformat the computer again.. so we currently don't have any internet at our home. and it scares me.

and what scares me more is the fact that i can no longer live without the internet, and of course, my computer. i was doing OK, back then, without internet and computer. i did all my my assignments without advanced technology so-called computer. i organised all of my stuff from 'the so-called real world', not 'the so-called cyber world'. as for now, well, i still use my books, pens and other non-advanced technologies, but hell i barely can do anything without internet and computer. i now have to go to uni, in order to use internet, just to get my reading list from all of my subject. it's supposed to be my day off you know. and it's friday! >.<

oh well, it's just amazing to see how internet and computer have changed our lives, innit? any help for my technical internet problem?

quote of my day: "our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter." -martin luther king, jr.-

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

have you ever, in your whole life, tasted cinnamon chewing gum? if you have, then you know how is it like to have a senseless tounge like mine today.
they should've put some sort of warning on the packaging: CAUTION: this product numbs your tounge. non excessive usage, even, can cause you a senseless tounge. proceed on your own risk. T_T

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

i am very emotional today. dunno why. i hate myself bcuz of this. maybe i take things too for granted. maybe. i hate being too emotional :(

on a lighter note, from this day on, i'm gonna put a quote of my day 'feature' everytime i post. it's sort of different from the 'quote of the day' on the right table. if that one is from a site, this feature is from my everyday life. have a bit emotional touch with my real life here. :)

dan alasannya komposisi keyboardnya gak pernah diganti, ya simply because we're used to that already.. and it called dependence path, on a electronic society term.. gitu. there, have a little piece of my lecture! enjoy ^^