A Writer...

First off, I really don't want many, or even one, "OMG, This is the best poem eveah?!?!?!!!111!?!!?" I want real comments with constructive criticisms please. Everything else can be left to PMs. Note that I just finished this s couple minutes ago and this is the first draft.

A Writer...
A writer at heart am I
Deep in my bones
Concealed from even me
To rear its sought after face time and time again.

Oh giving up would be easy
To forget my true self
And keep the reality
That society only knows me as.

Of Pens and Tongue
With Words that are concealed
And never to be shown
Except to be etched in one’s own heart.

My heart
It yearns to write
But Time and Tide stray me from the path
That calls to me ever more.

Re: A Writer...

to write from the heart in a
never ending flow of words does seem
tomake that face to be sought after
time and time again , and when it comes
from your or your soul where most
words come the final pen stroke
is that of true dedication.

i got this from that poem and i really liked alot
i hope you write another

I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
Isolate and save you from yourself

Re: A Writer...

It was good but is didn't quite flow. The third stanza to the fourth, it kinda just jumped. There seemed to be something missing. Also another little trick that was shared with me, if you can, try and not repeat the same word more than once. Find another word that means the same or something else that can say the same feeling. It had good structure and a nice use of some words to get your point across. You just need to tweak it abit and you'll have a great poem. I hope atleast something that I have suggested will help you in what you seek. Otherwise keep writing you have the talent.