So I went to HARD X MOUTH TAPED SHUT last night, and obviously went backstage w Diplo… who I call Wes because we “know each other now.” Apparently he is now the one and only DJ of MAJOR LAZER bc he told me “Switch is no longer a part of Major Lazer due to artistic differences.” OMG.

Although Switch is out, he told me that he still credits his producer and also his dancer Pink as an integral part of the collaborative effort, along with his “new guy” MC Walsh FIARRRR (spelling open 2 interpretation) who happened to come out to the SF Warfield show and dagger hard w Pink. *SO SEXXXY* DAT A$$***

On the album Diplo told me we would hear vocals from Vampire Weekend, Beanie Man and Sean Paul, amongst others.

Some transgendered individual *no judging* hopped in the Suburban with us out of nowhere. This lady was twerkin’ it hard, I’ve gotta give it up 2 her. She worked her way into some porn star’s holiday party we were at. This whole time I’m just chillin on a couch with Wes and Lina lovesit, meanwhile this redhaired Rihanna look alike (but the Japanese transgendered version) reaches over me, and grabs Diplo’s dick. Just watch:

She proceded to get into an argument with another desperate groupie who told her “don’t touch my man.” Eventually she was taken out of the condo, wailing arms, kicking and screaming. It was an intense display of groupie love. To make a memorable exit even more unforgettable, she pulled the fire alarm on her way out the door.