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They felt able to talk freely about my much younger colleagues because I was no longer in the running for their poll — and, even more insultingly, I was presumed too old to care. Somewhere along the line, I had become invisible.

The downsides of being a woman in her mid-50s have been chewed over. As well as a survey this year stating that more than two-thirds of the over-50s feel completely ignored by men, this week journalist and TV presenter Mariella Frostrup weighed in.

As well as a survey this year stating that more than two-thirds of the over-50s feel completely ignored by men, this week journalist and TV presenter Mariella Frostrup weighed in

Still attractive and obviously intelligent, at 52, Mariella claims to have been made effectively invisible as soon as she hit her half-century. ‘I shed half my workload the moment 50 appeared on my CV,’ she said. And surprise, surprise, it was her TV show that went, not the radio work.

Even beautiful actress Kristin Scott Thomas admits she feels ‘invisible’ while surrounded by younger starlets at the Cannes Film Festival. ‘When you’re walking down the street, you get bumped into, people slam doors in your face — they just don’t notice you,’ she says. ‘Somehow, you just vanish.’

Work-related problems are serious. But, for many of us, it boils down to one main complaint: people — specifically men — just don’t seem to notice us anymore. Eyes don’t flicker lustfully in our direction when we enter a room. No one bundles over to ask to join us in the pub.

Yes, we know we’re being inconsistent here. We’re the ones who spent our 20s and 30s railing against catcalls in the street and cheesy chat-up lines in bars. So, why do we now miss the thing we once detested?

Actress Susan Sarandon, now 68 and in a relationship with a man 30 years her junior, says: ‘I wouldn’t want to be 20. I know so much more and I’m much more comfortable in my skin'

Well, because no one likes to feel invisible. Invisible equals insignificant.

My 55-year-old friend Teresa, a drop-dead gorgeous solicitor, who has prised more stray fingers away in her time than Mad Men’s Joan Holloway, recently bumped into a man she’d previously sat next to during a day-long conference.

‘After five minutes, it became obvious he barely remembered me — he had me confused with some dumpy lawyer in her late-60s!’ she says.

No one likes to feel invisible. Invisible equals insignificant.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, it’s those who’ve spent 30 years toiling at the maternal coalface who feel the most anonymous. ‘We’re so used to defining ourselves in terms of who we are to other people that we’ve lost track of what we are to ourselves,’ says my friend Lucy.

‘Being inward-facing is partly what makes women become invisible. For me, it was caused by being overly focused on the children.’

Another friend, who is also a mum, says: ‘Sometimes, I think I just blend in with the scenery. I’m not certain I am even composed of solid matter when I’m outside of the family home . . . ’

But are we missing some of the upsides? Personally, I think it’s time our generation of women started to get a grip. As we age, we acquire wisdom and knowledge. Some of us have children and some get increased status at work. Is all this really such a terrible trade-off for sagging skin and anonymity? Really, I find it liberating that, now, I find myself caring less what others think of me.

Kim Catrall said her 50s came with increased self-knowledge

One friend of mine, who we’d better just call Ms X, airily suggested this could be the ideal time to set up an international crime syndicate. ‘Who would ever notice or mistrust us?’ she joked. ‘And, just think, Interpol would never catch us — because the crime scenes would be so lovely and clean!’ Just call us The Invisibles.

Indeed, this cloak confers on us a new identity. It allows us to be perceived as human beings first and women second — like we’ve always wanted. ‘At 50, what I am on the outside is [now] less of a distraction from who I am on the inside,’ says my friend Marie.

‘Women feel less competitive around me and men talk to me as an equal. As I’ve got older, it’s become easier to deal with tradesmen — it’s as if they don’t have to impress me with their manliness any more.’

Similarly, all invisibles are equal. All of a sudden, the gap between me and my most irritatingly beautiful friend becomes far less of a chasm than it was in my 20s. Indeed, even the gap between me and Kristin Scott Thomas is less of a chasm. I’ve found myself feeling warmer towards both of them as a result.

And I’ve been able to reinvent myself. The last time I pulled this off was when I left home for university and found myself among a group of strangers. ‘You’re so confident!’ one hot fresher told me, blithely unaware that, for the past few years, I’d been seen as the classroom geek and disco wallflower.

Invisibility means nobody will notice, object or mock if I suddenly decide I want a change of direction. Indeed, government figures show that, in the past year, more than 34,000 people over 50 have started an apprenticeship with a view to a new career.

On a more frivolous level, it’s the perfect time to try out a new hairstyle, look, or hobby. Earlier this year, we were told women in their 50s were driving a boom in sales of soft-top cars.

And even if the new hairstyle goes wrong, one brilliant plus to being invisible is that we no longer need to dress to pull.

When she hit 50, Michelle Obama said she had ‘never felt more confident in myself, more clear on who I am as a woman’

‘It’s such a relief not always having to make an effort to look your best for the opposite sex,’ says journalist Sharon. ‘Last week, I went away for a girls’ weekend. In the evening, we all scrubbed up well, but without any of the angst 20-year-olds have. We just wanted to have a lovely time together — not get a date.’

Yet at this point in our lives, we also know exactly how to look our best — so we can still whip off that cloak if we choose to.

‘I love being able to pop out for milk first thing — no make up, hair all over the place — knowing nobody will cast a look in my direction,’ says Sharon. ‘But if I do make an effort to glam-up, those same indifferent blokes will often do the second-glance thing and smile at me.’

When she hit 50, Michelle Obama said she had ‘never felt more confident in myself, more clear on who I am as a woman’. Actress Susan Sarandon, now 68 and in a relationship with a man 30 years her junior, says: ‘I wouldn’t want to be 20. I know so much more and I’m much more comfortable in my skin.’

And let’s hear it for the ultimate cougar, Sex And The City’s Kim Cattrall: ‘In my 50s [came] this wonderful self-knowledge. You’re not trying to be somebody else, or do something else with your life. You think: “Here I am. I’ve gone through this, I’ve survived that, and I know who I am now”.’

Could it be that, in our 50s, we have more choices? And are we more likely to be content at 55 than at any other point in our lives?

Let’s all meet up for a drink to discuss it. And if we’re ignored by the barman? Who cares.

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As yet another star moans about being overlooked in middle age ...Why Im happy to be an invisible woman