Mix. Pull apart the celery into strings. This will be your seaweed. Too cute to live.

Note that every dish on your buffet must be Halloweenized. A ubiquitous six-layer taco dip would look insipid undressed for the season. Even the punch bowl is ripe for scarifying:

FROG SWILL

Allow a half gallon of lime sherbet to melt in a punch bowl. Stir in two liters of ginger ale. Add ice ring made of fluorescent-green Mountain Dew.

‘GROSS GRUB’

As All Hallo Eve has moved from pagan excess to secular party central, circa late 1800s, the cottage industry of recipes with gutsy names is groaning. Our pioneer was usually mild-mannered Cheryl Porter with her 1995 “Gross Grub.”

This 38-recipe tome available on amazon.com and in cobwebby used-book shops insists Hairball Salad with Saliva Dressing is first food and second gourmet.

“How to make lettuce worm eaten” is a favorite, along with “how to make slimy spitwad place cards using corn syrup.”

Another classic still in print is Lucy Monroe’s “Creepy Cuisine. Revolting Recipes that Look Disgusting but Taste Divine.” Lucy describes it as “a cookbook only Ghoul-ia Child could love.” Name dropper.

There’s something wicked about food that stares back at you. Enter:

MUMMY-FACE PIZZA

1 English muffin, cut in half

2 tablespoons pizza sauce

2 sticks mozzarella string cheese

4 slices black olives

Spread muffin halves with blood, er, sauce. Pull cheese into bandage strips and place randomly in criss-crosses on tops of muffins. Add olives for eyes. Bake on cookie sheet for 10 minutes at 400 degrees.

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MUMMY DOGS

Wrap hot dogs in pizza or crescent-roll dough. Leave a small area at the top for the face. Cook according to dough instructions. Make eyes with mustard drips.