I saw this new serial that has started , the producer is AAMIR KHAN a big bollywood actor, I must say I was impressed that he has taken upon himself to show us people of india what is the reality that is taking place. the first episode was based on female Foeticide, a couple of stories were told about how people in our nation have gone so bad. The people who go on and on about India shining need to look at the hard facts and work towards it , Just by saying its india shining things will not work .

The most amazing part that I liked( i am being sarcastic, it made me so angry ) in was the replies given to a question by common people who is what the mentality of indians is , and the one that I keep harping on and on wherever I make comments or write a post , We who live in cities and big metros and consider ourself educated, we all say oh the problems start from small towns , from villages from the not so educated , or if some feminists are to be believed its the MEN.. YET the Reality is different most of the evil of killing a girl child inside the womb of a mother , Or killed once she is born are done by the EDUCATED , The clever lot. It’s the Rich , the educated, the ones living in the cities who started this all and its not just the MEN who do it , Women are also involved in this and in a big number too…

What was again more horrific was a story where the lady says that it was her MOTHER IN LAW who pushed the baby in the baby chair from the top of the stairs , since the Daughter in law gave birth to twin girls..

How the mother in law helped in doing the wrong against the daughter in law.

WHY are women doing this to other women.. PLEASE FOR GOD SAKE DONT SAY THAT IT IS BECAUSE OF THE WAY WOMEN ARE TREATED IN SOCIETY OR because of How men treated them. (which by the way is the latest trend) ..

There were clips shown where majority of the WOMEN doctors are helping in killing the child, So why is a women killing another Female.. The doctor is supposedly educated.. WHY are the Feminists who go on and on , on various issues Why don’t they get together and do something about such women .. it is estimated that the killing of a girl child in the womb is in lakhs about 10 lakhs of them a year .. and all for 2 thousand rupees.

I go to a lot of blogs and read the article and also read a lot of Comments by a LOT of EDUCATED, INTELLIGENT people .. they make me laugh for I think those people do only one thing which is COMMENT, or press the thumbs down buttons , They don’t have the audacity to know what actually is happening, You say one word against a female and you become the worst person living and if by chance you are a male who has written it , all hell breaks loose…

140 doctors were found who would help you get rid of a baby girl, majority of the doctors are WOMEN doctors, It was shown LIVE 7 years ago yet none of those doctors have been charged they are still practising their profession freely, YET NONE OF THE WOMEN oriented organisation have done anything to stop these women.

It is true men are responsible for all that is wrong happening to the women in india BUT there are a LOT a LOT of women too who are equally responsible , Yet most of the effort that is made to bring women up to par is by showing or telling how men are bad.

The show was really an eye-opener, brings out a very dark dirty bad side of the nation.

EACH ONE OF US has to open the eyes , EACH one of us need to start TODAY and change ourself, How many of us have stopped , or made an effort to stop something going wrong, majority of us have actually turned our backs and walked a different way , rather than stand up and MAKE SOME NOISE.

I leave you with this beautiful song,

WE all need to wake up and stop wasting time on useless issues and concentrate on issues which are almost trying to change the whole Indian generation, for 1000 boys there are 900 girls .. and if you take this to lakh or crore boys imagine where it goes . As shown in the episode there are men who are not getting girls for marriage , so they are ending up BUYING women from different states or places .. and using them.. This big difference in sex ration has brought a lot of other problems too, It is TIME WE WAKE UP.. else in few years time we will be again wasting time on this issue as it will go cancerous and unable to mend..

The same way as we are wasting time now on issues which in my eyes are maybe not that important as The female foeticide is in the current scenario.. IF all of us put our hands together , things can change BUT only if we want to , if we STOP and DO something about it Rather then looking the opposite way …

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I agree, social issues are never men versus women, most of these evils affect both men and women.
Loved the show and I hope it makes a difference in helping people see that daughters are not liabilities who have to be married off and sent to another family with dowries 😦

Also hope to see serious action being taken against these doctors who were talking about throwing foetuses in the Yamuna or graveyards 😦 I hope the families who pushed these women to abort are also punished.

YEs Ihm that what I wrote as a comment on your article that this is not about man vs women but you can for youself see the reaction to that comment, we indians dont like that unless a cause has a blame and if its a MAN to be blamed all the more better .. I saw the thumbs down and the UPs to that comment on ur blog. Which tells the apathy of us and how we look at a cause ..

no wonder things dont change in our nation …

mariage and dowry well that is a FAR far thing to think of at the moment , the Girl is not even born so marriage and dowry is a long time away …

and yes to all the punishements they shud be tried for murder and for murder its capital punishement .. In korea they changed it within a year

as the person said a couple of HI FI , doctors given examplary punishment will soon stop a lot of this

I don’t think punishment will make much difference. I mean, if the basic mentality of people is like that, and they have a system that supports them, its very difficult to bring each doctor/each family accountable by the law.

People might realize their stupidity later on (during their old age) when their son sends them out of the house/ ill-treats them.

Exactly my view to. The doctors are just meeting out a demand ( I’m not exonerating them), but the real problem is the consciousness of the people. And that has to change! The real & faster change will happen there.

Punishment to the doctors would definitely make a difference. In the show itself Dr. Punnet Chaddha (I hope I remember his name correct) quoted the case of Korea where in early 90s many doctors were prosecuted, put to jail and the problem was tackled within a year. Clearly it is more of a conglomeration of the medical industry and medical instrument companies as well.

Patriarchy is not the the cause of all evil in the society , the other woman who is a doctor herself, her MIL a retired principal who educated her daughters as well, went ahead and kicked a girl child from the staircase. In what way this woman was deprived/suppressed by patriarchy?

How many generations people would take to get themselves free from the clutches of social conditioning?

@sangeeta khanna– yes it will bring a difference as you mentioned korea did it so why cant we in india. As i have said almost all the time its us indian who ourself dont want to change anything, we are happy with the blame games.

and these days in our nation after the man bashing .. patriarchy is the next big thing to blame everything on …

TO ME why cant we for once forget about it all and ACTUALLLY do something about this cause , whats wrong in that .. and if we want it can be changed …

very true the example of the women is just a icing .. I think that in majority of the cases where a women is made to abort a girl child by the FAMILY .. then a woman is involved for sure .. it may be the mother in law – or a sister in law .. there is always a woman involved too..

I dont know the reply to your question but if we continue this blame game then surly we can not get rid of the social problems for sure ..

Anil sir.. Well if the doctors STOP doing it .. as it was told in the show the govt is also to be blamed because of the thing they started in the local dispensaries and all and then for a quick buck the doctors started practising .. It shud be tried as murder no other way.. the Judges too need to be educated on what is happening ..

Moreover as you say the mindset of us indians need to be changed too , because we have this habit of looking at causes with an idea of putting a blame on someone .. as I have read on a few blogs the Blame is now going oh its because of MEN again this is happening ..

I think that for ONCE if we get out of this mentality of BLAME GAME.. and actually work for the cause things will make a difference as the people of Navashehar in punjab have shown, no one was blamed but all got together to work for it and the result was there to be seen ..

I think the new name for man bashing is nowadays Patriarchy.. but then those are my thoughts

When I watched the episode, I wished and prayed to God to give me a daughter or two and how I would cherish them forever. My husband and I were shocked to see the educated ppl acting so cruelly without any thought that they too had emerged from the same womb and if their mothers had decided to abort them, they would not have been alive today! Here we long to have a baby, boy or girl, does not matter. What matters is that the baby is healthy, and these cruel ppl do not think twice before extinguishing life after life after life! Very very sad indeed.

I know , I was shocked too hearing what was going on and what the common people were saying the problem was vilalgers , uneducated and poor .. I mean we have a big village and I have not herd a single story like that in it ..
People shud be thnkful that they hav had a child there are millions who inspite of everything cant have a baby.. .
Very true a healthy baby is what one needs to ask for , moreover in modern era does it matter if its a boy or a girl ..

Exactly puts in my thoughts & sentiments on this issue. The upper/middle educated class are so bent in to have a distinction from the lower section that they willfully try to ignore these facts & walk with high heads.
We here might be missing the prelude to such behaviour i.e. school education & society impact. These twp things are not working properly & not instilling the right morals & values in the people.
I was not able to watch the show as i dont hav tv, but i ‘ll watch it on youtube once i get back home.

Very true. There is definitely a prelude to this I understand but that prelude has happened cant do much about it , so we shud concentrate on what needs doing and make sure NOW the schooling etc changes.

I watched it too. I like the show and I seriously hope that it creates some awareness and brings out a change!!!
My mother was so shocked to see that even educated people are doing such cruel things! Its so sad!
How can a person kill a baby! How can someone be so cruel!

ME too, I hope it brings about the right change , rather then blaming this or that .. if we could all get together and work on the problem ..

YEah how can they.. but they are doing it lot of reasons I see .. the biggest one in my eyes is that the rich think if they have a girl they will have to spend and give money away in dowry whereas if they have a boy he will bring all that dowry and money …

I missed the show. I am not sure when it is airing again here. I think we get a different Star Plus edition here. 😦

I am hearing a lot of good things about the show. Television is the best way to make more people aware. I hope it works out and more people realize the importance of such changes. Change has to come from within, but the awareness has to be broadcasted. It’s a good initiative.

Jyothi.. dont know maybe you are right , its a different star plus .. It was a very good show and right one but the only thing is what are people going ot od about it. already the blame factors have started oh its because of MEn or this or that .. patriarchy etc etc..

I hope we can GET ABOVE this blaming and actually work towards eradicating this menance ..

The show is certainly hard hitting and showcasing which we know exists but don’t want to look at it face to face… I completely agree… if change has to happen, it has to start from us… I just hope that the show does not remain mere telecast but brings about some action too…

Jas Haanji a hard hitting show. I hope NOW people will look at it .. this has been our bad luck always we have this habit that inspite of knowing the problem we tend to look the other way just because it doesnot involve us .. This attitude will need to change ..

The man in the mirror is the person to make that change … I do hope so too that people will do something positive rather then doing the usual BLAME GAME..

I loved this show for a celebrity taking up such issues rather than game shows. Hope it brings about a desired change in our society. This is only a handful of women who are actually coming forward to share their story. Imagine there are thousands more whose stories go unnoticed. It is a very sad picture 😦

yeah it is good of aamir , there are so many other celebrities who dont mind earning millions and living a life of luxury but when it comes to do something for the nation they dont want to be involved. WE in india follow our celebrities like we follow god .. so hopefully this might turn out to be goood .. people might actually listen to Aamir.

I know there are millions more out there who have the same stories as the one showcased, which is a sad picture hopefully with this many more will come out and many more BAD human beings will be brought out tooo …

Bikram, Another face of the story is sometimes helpless doctora are pressurised (not always with money but threats to life) by the local people rural areas. I came to know this from one of my friend who is a doctor and has faced such situations.
But that doesn’t take away the fact that female foeticide is the most dreaded situation. Like others i too believe it is the mindset of people which has to be changed. We need many many many more people like Mangala or Umashankar sir (a blogger who i follow).

Even I watched this show. I had tears till the end of the show and my man was closing his eyes, everytime something painful was on screen, specially, when there were images of how the husband pulled the skin from the woman’s face and other parts bywhat, by nails and teeth! Is he an animal!

And such educated people dint want a girl child! For once that MIL forgot, that she was a girl too!

But why take sides , this is the problem why do we need to take sides , why not work on the issue first .. yeah there is a problem but blaming wont help anything .. its time to put a stop to this menance ..

Bikram, I missed this show yesterday. But I would definitely watch it online. After what I read through your post I’m really thinking if I can face such harsh reality. Hmmmm its plain dark truth though. There are killers all around – a lot of them both men and women who don’t want the girl child. Shame on those ladies who is involved in this brutal act. I dont know what else to say.

Well truth is always HArsh. and sometimes difficult to face but Face it we all must sometime .. But do watch it ..

What made me write the post was the so called feminists for whom men are evil yet they dont say anything to what their own husband or father or borhter or son would do .. and as you will see in the episode there are a lot of women too who are doing the same .. but no one speaks of it all .. It is a shame really how mankind as a whole has become animals…

There is nothing ot say, its time to act and when we all together will act together all this will go away , till then nothing will change .. for anyone 🙂

I saw this last night too… and I was stunned… to silence!! He is doing what each one of us is trying to do… spread awareness through various mediums (twitter/blogger,etc)… His reach is much wider and I am glad that he is using his position and power to good use.. Many will bless him, m sure!!

Totally with you on this. The day we decide to change ourselves the change would start happening. Sadly these days we are busy pointing fingers at others or commenting/ applauding other but never try to change.
And I am totally with you on the fact that we should stop treating as men are the root cause of all problems and better start tackling the real issue as a human being.

Thank you smita. so true when we change things around us will change tooo.
ANd this is what my post is all about Pointing fingers , which we are so good at doing .. A problem has been brought to the front and we shud work on that problem but as usual (reading other blogs too) its back to the same old mud slinging man did this , patriarchy blah blah blah ..

I have two daughters and I would not trade them for a son. They are the best. I do remember the sad looks I would get when I would walk down the road with two girls. At the hospital when my younger one was born, the nurses did not even come for ‘bakshish’ , they would have fleeced me if I had a son!!

and thats the way how it shud be .. i dont see any difference betweeen boy or girl they are both Equal and shud be loved an cared for equally.
I am thankful to god that i belong to a family where this is true and I have been brought up with those values .. inspite of being the only male child yet i can say my sister is taken care and loved more then me ..

My father gav a party when she was born and distributed sweets to everyone …

Chowla sir bilkul theek kaha aapne. so true the motto shud now be Kamau puttar OR kamau BEti equally , rather what would be best is , once they are educated ask them to go and earn their own way .. go and make their own home .. I am sure we would have earned enough by then to live our life happily wthout the kamai of either of them …

Not only the doctors are aborting the girls they are doing for the boys too just to earn 2000/- rs.I don’t know how those doctors sleep and answer their own kids when they are prosecuted.I always say doctors are next to GOD.And GOD a female say the pregnant lady is 5 months pregnant and wait till the birth and throw the baby.Women is enemy for a women,be it a doctor,m-law.

Best part of the show was Aamir showing the village which changed their mindset of having only boys.Hats of to the person behind the campaign,forgot his name and the village.

oh i did not know that they were doing the same for boys too, that is sad but why ..
these docs have one god MONEY.
yeah it is all on video and yet the govt has done nothing , god knows how many babies she has killed after that video was recorded as she is still practisiing…

I completely agree with you. And yes the ‘why’ perhaps is a mystery to all of us here. I hope this show helps us make a difference some how because you will agree that in past too there have been few attempts to unveil the truth. But when these things got too much for the you know who to handle, they were shut down or lost without any trace. I just hope this does not happen with this show as well and we are able to make a difference in the way our society has come to become these days!

Thank you . I did not want to point fingers at anyone it was more of asking people to stop bickering over whose fault and rather do something about the problem.

and yeah it is govts fault too when they started the campaign of telling people or rather helping people it went haywire and the big ultrasound making companies took it as advantaage as a market to sell their products and docs wanted to make quick money…

lets see what happens with the show but that shud not bother us , whatever happens to that show we have been told the problem so maybe we should all wake up now

its never about man-bashing. but, yes, it is all about Patriachy!
why? because of the rigid social conditioning and how they are brought up at home.
Mind-sets need to change and people need to change the way they live.

I feel sorry for these women and men (I am not supporting them, and nor am I making excuses), but poverty and greed are so great in our country that killing a baby for a measly amount doesn’t seem bad to them… 😦
Women who kill their babies must be so desperate na? 😦 who else would do that?
I mean, their living conditions must be so terrible or they must have witnessed terrible terrible things in their lives that their heads are so screwed up… sad state of affairs.

Blaming men or women here wont help… we need to work towards changing people’s mind-sets.
And especially the greedy – because its the greed which drives educated people to ill-treat women or kill baby girls. Greed for more dowry, greed for having sons only…

No no, but its not the poor who are doing it , as the program suggested its the RICH and educated who are in majority doing this all. the poor or vilalgers doing this is just a myth as we saw. the poor are happy with the kids ..

and what you say is right blaming wont help as the time is to think of this cause and stop this .. but we indians have this habit of picking up and blaming on one thing and the actual cause goes for a TOSS as usual.. as has happened with a lot of motions … we love to hijack the idea for out own good .. as reading a lot of posts everyone has started blaming patriarchy I dont think so ..

yea.. its the Greed – greed for more dowry, jewellery 😦
rigid social conditioning is what causes all this and that’s Patriarchy.
men and women are affected.
I firmly believe that we need to change the way we live. The way our lives are ruled by rules and doctrines set about by generations of men and women who didnt have anything better to do with their time!

very true pixie.. and we also need to shut this killing shops where for a 2000rs a baby is killed. THe doctors , nurses etc need to be tried for murder because they have killed.
The law needs to change so such people are brought to justice faster .. as aamir khan said Fast track courts to be made to deal with this ..

and as the advocate in the episode said the JUDGES educated and told what law is .. A LOT of people are involved in this but i am sure IF WE all get together , and for once without thinking of men – women fault, if we get together we can make that change …

very true!! But, then we have judges and lawyers who are not empathatic to these situations! 😦
such a vicious cycle really!
These doctors and nurses really need to be punished!
To see some break in this and to see such shows where change is not only simply talked about, but also advocated and followed really helps!

he he he 🙂 you can write what you feel pisie .. I dont have a problem with that .. its good as its a healthy argument which is always good.

and yah lets hope this does not just become a man V/S woman movement , which is what i have been reading so far , As I wrote a comment and the reply was that this female foeticide has a lot on Tangent issues first they need handling ..

well as usual we will be left with handling the TANGENTS and lose this cause once again to our own thinking … 🙂

Ramesh bhai .. I can categorically tell you when my sister was born my father distributed sweets to the whole place and held a big party , there was no party when i was born ..

the menatality of people need ot change and its the rich who do such a problem one point is also that when rich have a girl they know that on their wedding they will have to give lot of dowry , so they get rid of girl and if its a boy they know they will GET so much money when the son gets married …

In my opinion, the number of female doctors is more as we have more Female gynecologist, atleast in India. More so, families feel comfortable going to female gynecologist in India, even the so called educated ones have reservations for male gynecologist. Anyways, that’s not what we are discussing here. I feel we are socially underdeveloped. I was reading a book which was set in 1790s to 1850s in Sussex, England. Back in those days, having a son was very importance but their society evolved, laws changed, society became more receptive. In our case, we have low morals, more sensitivity to society and we take pride in absurd things ( bearing a son is like an accomplishment). In a nutshell, all we can say is we are yet to develop from sociological perspective.

Why females are bad to females? There is only one reason – jealousy or to show that you are better than other. This is the common phenomena is each and every case.

I mentioned the number as those who are regressive enough to go for sex determination, also have reservation for male gynecologist. I wanted to show the low thinking or morals of such people, maybe, I failed to convey it earlier.

Again, it’s not about blaming or standing up. It’s all about changing the thought process. Telling them why it is wrong or how we can live better if we shun it.

Things can surely change but we need to have continuous determination for it.

Me too watched the episode of Satyamev Jayate …. I agree its an eye opener towards the reality!
While watching that show a lot of questions were rising in my mind too..
And was just hard to believe that how terribly a large majority of people are involved in such cases who are well educated and even women too!

Simran the world is very bad, what people do behind closed doors of their house is shocking to know.
everyone is at tit, whosoever can do – it is doing it , men-women all.. we are too blind as usual to do the same and start the blame gaming which is only what we are good at..

I am hearing such good things about the show. It is just too bad I missed it… I will catch up on it on Youtube asap. The bit about the mother-in-law?! Are these people even human? We live in such a narrow people, sometimes I think. The ‘Oh, all of that happens in villages’ crowd. Such a fallacy.

Debs not just that but we all say a man is at fault , man this or that .. but then the same man is a brother – a father a husband too.. so how can a person be good as a brother the same who has made his wife abort .. and also if we look carefully when a family is involved there is a female too who is involved in this act it may be the mother in law or the sister in law ..

I think we need to get out of this blame game and work for the cause …

yes please do see it , its an eyeopener and make your own mind at what you see 🙂 take care Debs and happy watching and come back to tell me what you think Please .. even if you think i have written something wrong .. please do tell me ..

We Indians are always looking for scapegoats and thereby postponing taking action. The same is the case here. I agree that we should stop blaming one gender for this and join hands as human beings and work together. If you say women are doing it, the response will be, ‘they are conditioned to think poorly of themselves!’ It is not men or women or patriarchy, but perverted minds that are doing it. If this show gets even one government to act and punish the culprits, I will cheer it on.

Very true mam, thats us .. Exactly my point.
it is funny the show showed how a sting operation was done 7 years ago and made headlines and all, so I am assuming a lot of people saw it A LOT , so people forgot about it , how many of us remembered it when it was shown again on sunday.. I doubt if anyone .. same way we indians are good at postponing , blaming 🙂

I know what you are saying and thats exactly what i wanted to put in front lets stop the blame games and do something at least this time ..

Yes. When I sit in my drawing room and wait for the world to change for my linking, going around with an escort all this while so I am not molested, I would keep blaming patriarchy because I have no exposure of the real world around….. I myself take shelter in patriarchy because it makes MY life easier till ‘that change I want’..

The retired lady principal. whose daughters were educated too(meaning she believed in liberty for women if they are her own daughters) kicked a baby girl from the stairs. I want to know HOW this kind of a woman is suppressed/conditioned by patriarchy.

Isn’t each crime a result of a perverted mind? And that doesn’t need any conditioning….

I read a few comments who say the docs should not be punished. I am shocked at this reaction…a life saver is killing and you ask such a question? A doctor is a bigger criminal in this case for killing many unborn babies (a serial killer)..the parents might be ignorant or conditioned or even mazboor, if not criminal…still the doctor’s responsibility is more…

I tried to watch it y’day but the video is banned at US. Have read enough about the show today from news and blogs.. thanks to all of you. Hope this show reaches to more people who needs that thinking and change in attitude especially with telecasting in DD I hope it will make a difference. hope hope and hope

Yes, I do agree with you. In my field of work, over a decade, I have come across this or faced this horrible situation many times, although we do not deal with it directly. Now, we stumble when it comes to educate the educated. Normally we tend to educate the uneducated. Its easy to wake a sleeping person up but very difficult to wake some one up who is laying awake and pretending to be asleep. We all must vehemently condemn this. Punishment they must get that’s the only way out.
It actually baffling to see on one hand a horrible crime like female foeticide taking place and on the other, ninety percent of the PAPs (Prospective Adoptive Parents) that register in our Adoption Home, opt for a female child. Every other day we rescue a new born female child in garbage dump or one is abandoned somewhere. The only satisfaction is, we have never failed to find a loving home or parents for a girl child.

Absolutely its time we woke up! Like I have said before on other occasions and like most of the above commenters have said, its the mindsets that need to change and hopefully this show with the right intentions will help in bringing about that change. Lets keep our fingers crossed! 🙂

Yes, we woman need to change. We need to change the way society treat us by standing up to atrocities but the sad fact is most of us including myself do not have the courage.
Only when the change comes from each and every woman and we muster enough courage to fight against those who thwart our rights…we will be treated fairly and with respect.

Till then all this will happen.

Many of those unborn talents could have been future missile women, Indira Gandhis or Kalpana chawlas…

Well-said, we as women have to show the courage of fighting against these inhumane actions. Like I said below, at the end of the day, it’s the woman carrying the baby who is letting this happen to the unborn child. If she raises her voice, may be takes help of an NGO or some organisation, then probably a collective action could prevent such heinous crimes to some extent.

I feel that a change in the attitude of the society starts only when a change in the attitude happens in a family, that is, it starts from the mother, who can instill values in her baby sons and daughters who will grow up in to men and women with values intact. The change that is needed is overwhelming.

EXACTLY .. blaming society or men or that or this is not gonna work.. as everyone is involved in all that is happening some in huge number , some in minority but they are involved .. Till we all change things will not change .. that is the truth and blame game will never work .. thats what we have been doing since independance :)..

I share your indignation and anger. I loved the show, and I’ve always maintained that it is not men victimizing women that is the cause of the problem. It is the powerful exploiting the not-so-powerful, and women can be equally cruel and lethal in this as can be men. The time is to recognize this problem within each one of us before we raise a finger pointing at another. The time is to start the change within oneself first.

Hard hitting and SO VERY WELL put. It is a pity, women docs do that. Dont they even shudder when they think, what if thier own parents had done the same thing? I havenot wacthed the show, but I would soon. This is a terribly shameful act, and we all should be ashemd somewhere.

I believe punishing the doctors who are involved in such a dark action is a hands on solution. It needs to also be accompanied by a more holistic approach, meaning, educating people, not only to earn PhDs, but merely to be able to place themselves in another person’s shoes and understand others, have empathy and be considerate. That is the basic requirement for a truly educated society, not diplomas. Men should understand women, women should understand men, adults to children, mother-in-law’s to sister in laws etc… And if we don’t understand each other, then let us at least be considerate. If that were the case, female foeticide would not be happening.

It is it will at least stop that doctor killing another baby, and IF ONLY ONE LIVE is saved that’s JOB WELL DONE.. here we are talking hundreds thousands ..
yes what you say is so right.. a lot needs doing , hence my point that lets stop this blaming and Get to work .. roll up our sleeves, pull our trousers up and Jump into the mud to clean it .. rather then sit and blame it on MAN or Patriarchy..

bascially if each one of us treats the other as a human being , things will start ot change .. treat others as you urself want to be treated …

you are right in saying its female vs female , though terminating a female fetus is banned in India but of little effect , no govt ,no NGOs can do much about it until women stand up for the cause or doctors vow not to terminate a female life which is done silently as it fetches them money, killing female fetus is more common in major cities than in smaller towns and is prevalent in a particular segment of society…bikram i saw a 4 month old ,fully developed female fetus lying in a nursing home washroom , a pathetic sight but then what does one do ? even if i had complained, the nursing home was in capacity to silence the cops by paying some doe…and beat it some NGOs in the country push rescued girls in to prostitution, so it happens in prisons,its a sorry state .media does follow what nupur Talwar ha in breakfast or dinner,, they would not mind breaking a news that aishwarya rai delivered a child because thats what sells..so its us the society as a whole who can eradicate such evils.

THat’s the point I dont want it to be man this or woman this, Why cant we just get together and tackle the problem which is going to harm us all in future .. the reason I said women are involved is because of the general trend of man bashing and patriarchy that we get to hear over everything …

You are right no one is doing what they should be doing especially the Govt, when has GOVT ever done anything for the good of people, forget about them , they never have , they never will, Its up to all of us to do something .

How horrific that site would have been i can imagine .. and media again they are only interested in TRP’s these days everywhere its this program being shown or talked about , give it a couple of days and the same media will forget about it tooo, MEdia is like govt you cant trust it tooo .

sad sad situation , its up to the people to do something and no one else is gonna help.

Bikram, what use is trying to punish the doctors, it’s people who go for that uncouth step who have to be punished. In fact, how are such cases going to come to light? Maybe the doctors, instead should be given an incentive for REPORTING such people or cases, which in turn should be followed up with inquiries and subsequent punishment.

Female infanticide or foeticide is not just one problem in itself.. lying a the root of all these problems is the entire burden of dowry (or inherent gifts as they coolly call them now, no one says it openly but it ends up what it is – dowry) and how the family keeps spending on a girl only to give her away.. one day, who will change these mindsets in which the girl is looked upon as burden? My parents don’t have a son, but papa has never felt the need to have a son. I am his son. How many people or rather how many among those who go to these doctors with such requests as aborting the female child, have the guts to say that this child is going to be the son I always want – even if it is a girl child.. ?

Definitely it’s not a gender war – a woman is not less guilty than a man involved – because at the end of the day, the girl child still dies in the womb of her mother – a woman. If the mother could do nothing to save her unborn child, then what blame should be made on the mother-in-law, or the sister-in-law or the lady doctor? I mean, yes, the mother may feel she has to save her marriage/family, but killing a child is still murder, isn’t it?

THe use of punishing the doctor is that if they refuse to abort there will be LESS deaths, they refuse to do ultrasounds to know the Sex of the baby , things will change. Why are we as a nation always afraid of punishing the guilty , they have done something wrong THEY SHOULD BE PUNISHED. Simple . Take korea for example they shot a few doctors and brought a iron hand and everyone was working fine … We indians need that for sure.

I cna understand there are a lot of problems BUT would you rather save a child NOW , or work on trying to change the root problem , in my little mind I think a HUMAN life needs to be saved first THAT IS PRIORITY, SAVE the life .. always.. rest can wait .. yes a lot needs changing but WE as a nation need to take this problem head long and save those babies and then also work on the root causes that you have mentioned …

It is not a gender war everyone is equally involved some in a bigger number thats all, the sooner we learn the easier it will be to make a change , we waste so much time in proving who is at fault .. OK I SAY ITS A MAN FAULT , only a MAN is to be blamed right theire you go .. blame game finished and accepted .. WHAT NEXT … the problem in our nation is we go on and on an don and onnnnnnnnnnnnnnn on the same issue anything and eveyrthing comes to the same root .. THEN WHAT .. what next

yes killing a child is murder thats why that doctor needs to be tried for murder

This topic is nothing new, it has been part and parcel of being an Indian, living in India. For ages people in India have always been celebrating the birth of a son, and many may not have gone to the extent of killing female child, still one could always see their disappointment in not giving birth to a boy child. We have seen so many people becoming pregnant again and again hoping to have a male child at any cost even after having 3/4 female children. It is the one main reason for our population. If only we could understand that it is not in our hands to have a boy or a girl, we would done our bit in saving the planet.
All this Bharat mata slogans sounds so hollow.
Every time a newly wed gets pregnant for the first time, the MIL’s wish is that she should have a boy, although she maybe educated and she herself may not have given birth to a male child at first. It takes a long time for the stigma for not delivering a male child to go away.
At least one can be slightly happy these days that people are not so bad these days despite coming across some incidents that are high lighted in the TV.
Now a days, people are open to just having one child, and they don’t care whether it is a girl or a boy. In fact I have known so many people who are my friends adopting a female child, even when they could produce their own child. Times are changing, and the few incidents that are high lighted need not worry us so much. Now a days Doctors don’t even tell the sex of the baby,ad so we must have faith in humanity, and not condemn all doctors, or all parents. The change is happening, and I think it is high time they all showed people who are doing good things, so that seeing such good people others are also inspired to do some good in their lives.

BUt it is new mam, this sort of killing did not exist in this huge number in the medivial times , This problem does not exist in that huge a number among the poor , or the adivasi’s .. It has become a trend in the modern India for the educated and the rich and what not.
celebrating a birth of son was done ages ago but the killing did not happen.
and you re right the slogans are always shouted at high pitch with those (MAJORITY of the times) who dont even know the meaning of the slogan and have probably never ever done anything for the good of the nation …

Wishing for a son is not a crime , you can wish for it but what you do when you come ot know its going to be girl is the issue here, and its is so astonishing that its the educated the so called people who probably PREACH against all this who are doing it themself, which is a shame.

Well if we take the ratio and Number things have Worsened and if we go by it there will be 2crore boys more than girls soon, so its a myth that these days people are changing , No they are not its getting Worse actually.

Bikarm I watched the program too and I think Amir is doing a GREAT job! I can share your anger on this. But before we blame women let us understand what it is that causes this. It is not men or women who do it but a certain value system that all of us have imbibed- it is called Patriarchy which believes in the superiority of the male over the female gender. Both men and women subscribe to it- it is so internalized that we do not even realize that we have such values.

The poor never kill their children. It is the rich and the middle class who are into this thing of the heir to the family on one hadn while on the other they are worried about dowry for the daughter or daughters. Foeticide is something horrible. there is also infanticide that is practiced in some parts -equally horrible !

He has done and is doing a good job for sure, I salute him for having the guts and coming out in the open.
I am not blaming anyone , that remark was for the feminists and others who have one Work these days anything wrong blame it on man or patriarchy.. instead of working to stop what is happening ..

I never blame anyone, I am sorry if it came out that way .. I am no one to blame anyone I concentrate on what I have been taught and what I can do ..

whosoever is to be blamed , whatever it is , FINE , As i said in the end lets concentrate on eradicating this menance by stopping the killing of a innocent child .. Lots of problem .. but if a small town in punjab can make a change why cant the rest of the towns ..

Well Said. I never used to like people saying ” It’s always the Uneducated people” who resort to such demeaning acts. Our country is seeing a lot of hypocrites today. It’s not the issue with a Man or Woman. It is an issue with a certain set of people who are not wise enough to realize what they are doing!

I think the crux of the Indian female foeticide (FF) riddle is the matrimonial customs prevalent in the country – I think, if we can abolish arranged marriage out of the system completely, I’m pretty sure FF will come down once the notion of financial burden is elmiminated from the minds of new born parents.

If we get into a system where man and woman date and find their mates themselves, matrimony will be done for the right reasons and not with the added baggage of expensive weddings, dowry and other financial transactions- also, the spirit of ‘the dating game’ will make us more competitive and better individuals, and thus leading to a better society.

Makes perfect sense. I agree, arranged marriages come with a lot of financial and emotional baggage. Since the groom is not emotionally attached to the bride and the attachment only starts with the start of the marriage, he can not defend his wife from the whims of his MIL’s wishes for a male child. In turn, if the marriage is a love marriage, I am sure the man would tell his wife, I want you and the baby safe, doesn’t matter if it is a boy or a girl.
Arranged marriages are not found else where, dowry system is not prevalent else where that’s why the incidents of female foeticide are less prevalent elsewhere.

R-A-J.. hmmm I dont know anything about that , arranged marriage has been working for decades and girls were not being killed then , this is a new trend so we cant solely blame arranged marriages, and even in love marriages such things happen.

I feel having a boy child is not to do with financial burden. I have seen in even well off educated families there is demand of a boy. It is “kuriti” in society like there was once “sati pratha”. Such things can be eliminated only by developing healthy attitude in coming generation.

I finally watched part of the program today – just part of it, but it was chilling. We certainly need something like this.

Both men and women are equally responsible for state of things. It is the system, the mentality that needs to change. As long as people think of baby girls are curses, and baby boys as blessings, things will stay as such. Clearly the program has shown that the mentality is not dependent on class, creed or strata – people across board think like this. At the same time, there are states in India where it is not happening – may be we need to see what is different in the societies there. What makes people in those states happy to accept babies as they are?

Infact even in the UK, I was told that in areas with a high Asian population, this phenomenon was seen.

As for punishing the doctors -yes, of course, they should be. And hopefully they will as well, but people sadly find ways of getting around all this, just as they have got around the ban on sex determination. Hopefully programs like this will help change mindset.

It indeed was , I think everything that is TRUTH is chilling for truth hurts always.
and yes mentality need to change and WE ALL need to change too,

Yes in UK if its a asian couple they think before telling the sex of the child, I have a doctor friend who tells they have been warned on this .. to be very sure if they are happy to tell the sex of the child ..

I myself dont mind being told I would want ot know , jsut because I would want to make preparations for the new arrival , If you know what I mean ..

I hope the docs back home are punished and given proper punishment.. lets hope things do change …

I was told that we were expecting a daughter. And the sonographer asked -‘You folks prefer to have boys, don’t you?’. I was stunned but said that I have wanted a girl since ever – and that was the truth too -we were over joyed that it was a daughter.
Later, I got to know that most second generation Asians here, were not told the sex of the baby. Apparently there was some study done, and it was found that a lot of female fetuses were aborted…

Not just the docs, even the people’s mindsets need to change. Hopefully programs like this will drive it home to those who opt for sex selective abortions.

Heard about the programme, but just managed to see them through one of your fellow blogger who had published the video in your comments section…so heart wrenching to see these are happening in a country which we denote every beautiful thing to mother – earth , ganges, yamuna..Wah…And even hard hitting reality to digest is that these are done by well earned educated people. Amazing initiative and show…

YEah a excellent start to a series that will hopefully widen our eyes .. to see what is going on .. Glad you were able to watch the program. it is heart wrenching but then truth usually is . lets hope things change..

The show was very well conceived and presented. It told us about a problem(that many of us already know), how it started, the root cause, how it spread and aggravated like a disease in almost all the states of India. The misconception that only uneducated and poor people had to do with the problem. Amir stated it well that we, the young, literate and well off people have this JADU KI CHADDI to eradicate it all by ourselves before the Politicians,Law enforcement and Sewa Sansthans come forward. I guess we need to keep this FIRE burning and take it to the level of ANDOLAN so that it makes the efforts of STING operation bring more awareness among us.

All social evils in India like female foeticide,,child labour,sexual harrassment of women,law and order,delayed or no justice,gunda gardi exploitation of labour etc are interrelated ,,as long the condiotion of indian society is poor some people will always engage in female foeticide.

The majority of people that discuss issue’s on internet are eiither from highly educated upper middle class indian society or NRi’s.They are actually very tiny minority in Indian society and hardly represent mainstream Indian society.I don’t think most of people here engage in much of social evils.Infact most people write so good that I always wonder whether they are really good people or just pretend it.

Wow. I have been called a lot of names..but this one of pretending to do things is a first one.. So thank you for that.
Regarding writing good I never think I write good but yeah maybe on pretending I am very good..
Appreciate that thank you.

There is another side to the same coin of massive socially customary female infanticide:

In Indian society a dead female is socially accepted but an infertile one is not. As a result there are practically no effective mechanisms for population control. Indian population will not stop growing even up to and beyond 20 Billion ( when the increased death rate due to aging might equal the births due to fertility of youth ), except that if Indians continue to practice female infanticide on a massive scale then due to reduced numbers of fertile citizens the population growth will come down, and it might stabilize at around 10 Billion eventually.

To further explain this, if all female Indians were to become irreversibly infertile today then about nine months later the birth rate would be exactly zero. Population would be around 1300 million and going down at a rate of about 15 million per annum due to deaths. In just 20 years the population would be below 1 Billion, and still going down. That is the desired effect that official efforts at family planning could not produce in about seventy odd years of trying.

Female infanticide is India’s only known effective method of population control. Although by international standards even 10 Billion is a very big number, India really has no choice. The ages old habits developed in an uneducated people can neither be wished away nor safely ignored. As of now India simply cannot afford to let all the natural born girls live on to fertile adulthood.

An ages old habit of an uncivilized people has a good chance of doing what all the seventy odd years of Intra Uterine Devices ( IUDs ), Loops, Copper Tees, Pills, Saheli, and official propaganda could not till date achieve. Being an almost entirely uneducated people, the ancient Indians could not put their reasons in scientific form, but like the so called Lemmings they simply adopted a habit suiting the need.

Nature seems to have evolved a simple way of dealing with the bigger problem of unbridled population growth ( which too is driven by unstoppable social practices ), thereby making a balance between the sacrifice and the benefit.When we criticize a naturally evolved custom of a largely uneducated people, we should not ignore the evolutionary factors driving their habits.

Hello, Well what can i say to this theory its out of my stupid mind. dont know what to say .. But will put it up for others to comment and see what they think of this..

I am really flabbergasted at this mentality .. no wonder india is where it is at present.. SO what happens when in few years time its only MEN left and no women …

will multiple men start to share a women… What do you think will happen and why is nature only evolving like this in India and not in other countries .. this is not a naturally evolved custom its a HUMAN BEING evolved custom and its called MURDER in simple words …

I liked the show too, Bikki. I think this could be the start of many things to come with regard to social change. But I think the show fails quite badly when it comes to ‘action items’. I have just written a post on this, like about a minute ago!!

I am loving it , as I feel liberated when I think of all those arguments where people said oh this does not happen in india, its only in western countries .. how can this happen in india our culture is closer to god 🙂
but yets I hope and HOPEEEEEEEEEEEee it starts something gooooood

Well its a start so bound ot have a lot of problems but maybe just maybe people can get behind it and DO SOMETHING and cover those problems …

” ME AND MY SISTER ” — The feature film deals with the impact of the act of female foeticide on the child. An educated couple are shown to be troubled , harassment of women and panic at the thought that their coming child would be a girl. They even think of killing the foetus. The internal conflicts and anxiety of the pregnant women throws light on the issue. But as , it happens, the woman bears the foetus of twins, a MALE and a FEMALE. The twins talk inside the womb about the world outside where women are not secure. The story artistically depicts today’s burning social issue like female foeticide, stressing specially on the rights of woman in the perspective of the changes taking place in the 21st century. The film , shot in Cinemascope 35mm , Produce by Nipon Dholua under banner NBDK PRODUCTION.

The Synopsis
The film, ‘Me and My Sister’, deals with the impact of the act of female foeticide on a child. Geetartha, Chandana and their only son Akash are living their life with all happiness. Chandana is carrying and is now at primary stage. Geetartha makes sincere efforts to boost up her spirit and confidence while Dr Jharna, a gynecologist and their family friend, provides her with all medical care to ensure smooth and safe birth of the unborn.
A responsible government officer, Geetartha, one day finds a young lady refusing to accept the award ‘Woman of the Year’, a state award of high esteem. Back home, Geetartha shares his feelings with Chandana, who, on hearing the name of the lady and then seeing her photograph, comes to know that Dolly, the lady, was her best friend during college days.
Chandana is deeply concerned about the trauma and agony in the life of Dolly and her little daughter Shikha. Along with her husband Geetartha and son Akash, Chandana provides mental support to Dolly and thus she becomes involved with Dolly’s life. Sometimes, one or two disturbing incidents in Dolly’s day-to-day life fetch Chandana mental anxiety, tension which is harmful for her at this very stage of pregnancy.
In the mean time, Dr Jharna after a routine check up of Chandana finds that she is carrying a twins. This makes both Chandana and Geetartha ecstatic. But Akash is more excited about his sister to be born.
Days pass on and the event of the award presentation function is nearing. Dolly is adamant in her decision not to receive the award because she does not believe that this award could neither change whatever already has happened to her life nor will bring any change to her future life. She simply and silently leaves the township along with her little daughter Shikha.
One day, Chandana suddenly falls ill and starts feeling labour pain. At the hospital Dr Jharna tells Geetartha that she is not in a condition now to deliver birth to two babies, and, therefore, one baby in her womb has to be spoiled. Geetartha has no other means for the sake of life of Chandana. When Chandana is taken to operation theatre, Dolly and Shikha drop in at the hospital. Geetartha, stunned on seeing Dolly after her sudden disappearance, is elated to know that Dolly has come back only to receive the award which will be presented in a glamorous function that evening by the Chief Minister. Dolly tells Geetartha that she will receive the award not for her but for and on behalf of Chandana, the lady who has undergone so much of pain and agony while standing beside unfortunate Dolly and Shikha. The operation is successful and it fetches Chandana another son. Geetartha is happy to see his wife Chandana alive perfectly and also to find one more son coming to his family. Back home in Geetartha-Chandana’s place, Akash still waits for his sister who, in fact, was already committed from their life. Forever……………………………….
Cast
Prastuti Parashar, Barsharani Bishaya, Samar Hazarika, Gyanendra Pallab,
” Child Artists ”
Dishan Dholua , ,Birina

Welcome here to this blog, Thank you so much for visiting.. and I bet it is a great movie and hopefully along with such shows and movies people can come ot know about all that is going wrong nad od something about it ..

Thank you so much do keep visiting, I will look forward to seeing this one for sure ..

It is not only female foeticide that is becoming a problem we all should look into the reasons of this act.should take measures for the safety of girls or females,should take actions against dowry,should punish ppl spending extra money on marriages just for the show which some other father cannot do hence a guilt or even kids feel bad.There can be more reasons also like looking after property or brother to visit sisters house or hindu last rights etc….one can stop killing only if there is a change in thoughts of general public.

An eye wash!! Surely, it has attracted so much argument/discussion..
Normally, there is a perception among people that only men are responsible for the evils like female foeticide, dowry etc. Gud..u emphasized on the fact that at certain level women are also responsible. The society is rotten..it can be cleaned up only if each individual cleans up his/her thoughts first, then spreading the awareness and taking the necessary measures.

It is also sad that educated and so called broad minded people ask “how are you feeling that your first born is a girl” to couple who have just become parents!! Deep down the mentality still exists quite widespread inspite of education and social campaigning 😦