My Life in an Interracial Marriage and Family ~ It's been 25 years of fun; learning, growing, laughing & crying with each other. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoy writing it!

Monday, June 28, 2010

"She's Your Kind"

Great Niece, Niece, Daughter and Me

Once a month my family and I volunteer at Angelfood. My Sister n Law runs the program at her church for our particular area. It's a lot of work but oh so much fun! It has become quite the family affair! We volunteered as always this past weekend. Customer after customer lined up to get the food they ordered. One woman in particular came up to me and made it a point to say, "Hi Amy," and then continued to have a little conversation while she waited for her food. She does this each time she comes to the church. She just so happens to be white and the church just so happens to be a "black church." Not that everyone and their brother isn't welcome, it just so happens to be that way. =) After the woman left, I turned to my niece (my husband's side of the fam) and said, "That lady is so sweet, she always comes up to me and talks to me while she waits for her food." My Niece then said, "It's because you are her kind." It took a second for me to process what she said, then I realized what she meant, and said, "Oh, because we are both white? Ya think!?" My Niece said, "Ya!" Then we both just laughed! So does this lady automatically come talk to me because I'm white and that makes her more comfortable? Or is this just what my Niece thinks? It's all so odd to me, because I soooo don't think that way. I'm the only white person on so many occasions and am so used to it, that I just don't go there in my brain. =) I hope the lady talks to me because I'm friendly......but everyone there is friendly, so why does she always pinpoint me? Is my Niece right? Is it really because I'm "her kind?" Hmmm.......something to ponder.

Jamie gets that ALL the time! He is such a BIG guy he freaks people out! Little do they know he is a teddy bear! He will have me talk to people first so they don't get scared or put off by the "big black man!" Seriously. Nothing like judging a book by it's cover. He has the biggest heart on the planet! Thanks for your comment...it hit so true to home!

I think you and I live in our own world sometimes and we often don't realize it. Our homes and families are our safe havens and I think we forget (or want to forget) that the rest of the world does NOT love each other the way we love our family. We look at our loved ones we don't ever see a color, just someone who means the world to us. Seems to me, more and more and unfortunately every day, I am reminded how unfair and racist the world outside still is !!

I always "forget" that we are a mixed race family. We are just a family that happens to be from different races. I think things are getting better and better even though we do have a long way to go. I just make sure to surround myself with people that have the same heart that I do. It still blows my mind when racism pops up in our lives because it is so off my radar to even think that way! Keep livin' in love, keep showing everyone in your town that your family is just that...a family! Hugs sent your way!

Fellow She Writer here. I would like to submit the thought that it might have been a possibility that the initial contact was made because of sameness, however, the recurrence would have to be maintained because you are a genuinely pleasant person with whom to converse. Sometimes people spend too much time looking at motives when the truth is right in front of them. God's light within us, is its own draw. I say, continue to be you, there's no need to remember you're a blended family (unless you're in a hostile neighborhood...lol)

Thank you for such a lovely comment. It's funny because even though I write about our "mixed" family it's not something that I ever concentrate on. It's strange though because it always comes up in one way or another when we are out and about. I have so many lists of things to write about it is never-ending. Thankfully most are good and only a very few are negative. I have learned over all these years to take it all in stride and to use those negative circumstances as teaching moments towards change.

Thank you so much for reading and commenting....I look forward to getting to know you!