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Where in Europe is Carmen Sandiego

Where in Europe is Carmen Sandiego
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\___| |_| |_| |_| \_\ |_| |_| |_| |____| |_| |_|
____ _ __ _ _____ _ ____ ___ ____
/ ___| / \ | \ | | | _ \ | | | __| / \ / \
| (__ / _ \ | \ | | | | \ | | | | |__ | /\_\ | /\ |
\__ \ | |_| | | |\ \| | | | | | | | | __| | | ___ | | | |
\ \ | _ | | | \ | | | | | | | | | | ||_ | | | | |
___/ / | | | | | | \ | | |_/ / | | | |__ | \/ / | \/ |
|____/ |_| |_| |_| |_| |____/ |_| |____| \___/ \____/
===============================================================================
Table of Contents
===============================================================================
[INTRO] Introduction
[START] Getting Started
[WALKT] Walkthrough
[DOSSI] Dossiers
[CLUES] Interpretation of Clues
[QUEST] Frequently Asked Questions
[VERSN] Version History
[COPYR] Copyright
[CONTC] Contact Information
Navigation tip: Press Ctrl and F to bring down a search bar. Then type in the
name of the section you're looking for - like [DOSSI] for the Dossiers.
===============================================================================
Introduction [INTRO]
===============================================================================
I can't believe I did it, but I've now successfully written a guide for each
of the original five Carmen Sandiego games! I know there have been a few more
Carmen games released since the first five, but someone named Rebecca Skinner
(Karpah) has already written a guide for Space, and the newer games in the
series use a radically different format. Really, it's been several years since
any Carmen game has been released, and that's kind of sad. I'd love to see them
remake the first five titles - especially Europe - with the old basic designs,
the witty clues, and the bumbling V.I.L.E. henchmen, just updated to reflect
advances in graphics and changes in borders and history. But most of these
games were sold to schools, and in this test-obsessed era, the educational
brass puts little emphasis on the "tainment" part of "edutainment."
Anyway, Where in Europe is Carmen Sandiego is a great game, but today it's
undoubtedly the least relevant title in the series. The biggest problem stems
from the breakup of the Soviet Union, Yugoslavia, and Czechoslovakia (and, for
some versions, the reunification of Germany), which means that many of the
clues refer to cities and regions that are now part of other countries. Even
with the developments that have occurred since the release, though, the game
remains a fun way to learn about European history and geography. The graphics
are kind of grainy in the PC version, although the frequent animations are
pretty fun, and there are lots of photos of famous landmarks that capture the
feeling of the countries you're visiting. There's no in-game music, but there
are plenty of PC speaker-based sound effects - some of which are great, while
others can be loud and annoying. The controls are really easy - just use the
arrow keys and ENTER to access the various screens. The Ctrl key accesses some
of the other features. The game isn't that tough for someone who's good at
history and has a couple of good reference books handy, but it may be pretty
tough for many people, including some with college diplomas. Maybe it's just
me, but I also feel this game lacks some of the wit and goofiness of the other
Carmen games. Also irksome is the robotic sign-in screen, which takes forever
to load. Overall, it's still a fun, educational game, just like all the others
in the series.
By the way, a very important note: I played this game on a PC/IBM-Compatible/
DOS computer and used Version 1.1 (released in 1990). This later version
removes all clues that pertain to West and East Germany.
===============================================================================
Getting Started [START]
===============================================================================
Before you can play, you'll have to install the program. Simply create a new
directory (probably something like C:\CARMEURO) and copy all the files on the
disk(s) to that directory. Be patient; old floppies can be slow. When you're
finished, change to that directory and type CARMEN (or double-click CARMEN.EXE
from My Computer) to start the game. You shouldn't have to restart in MS-DOS
mode to run Where in the Europe is Carmen Sandiego.
First let's take a brief look at the controls and menu options:
The main screen displays the current location, the day and time, a photo from
the current country, and general information about where you are.
The "Investigate" button is the most frequently-used choice. It takes you to a
menu with three options - Question Witness, Search Scene, and Call Tipster -
you can use to search for clues about the suspect's identity and whereabouts.
All three choices do about the same thing, but remember that the more places
you search, the longer each one will take proportionally.
"Use Notebook" sends you to the crime notebook dialog. This allows you to input
pieces of evidence into the various fields, such as eye color and favorite book
genre. You can go here as often as you like without losing any time.
"Visit Crime Lab" takes you to a screen with a variety of options, although it
will cost you at least an hour. When you think you have enough clues to get a
warrant, select "Enter Crime Notes" to get the warrant, which you'll need to
make a valid arrest on the suspect. "Use Database" lets you see what countries
have a particular flag, currency, or language; scroll through each option using
the arrow keys. Each use of the database costs an hour, though, and all this
information is available in any world almanac. Select "Return to Scene" when
you're ready to return to investigating. This costs an hour, though, so don't
visit the Crime Lab unless you really need to. "Save Case" ends your case and
saves it so you can resume it at a later date. Remember that you won't
overwrite another player's in-progress case when you save and quit.
"Go to Airport" puts you on the airplane to the next destination; there will be
four (sometimes three) options; one will usually be your previous location.
Don't leave until you're pretty sure where to go next. If you go to the airport
but then return to town, it'll cost you an hour of time.
As for things you can do with the Ctrl key:
~ Ctrl-D (or Ctrl-L) shows the Detective Roster - a list of players who have
signed in, along with their current levels and number of cases completed. If
you want to delete a player, highlight the name and press ENTER.
~ Ctrl-F shows the Hall of Fame, a list of players who have completed many
cases and beaten the game. Expect this elite group to be empty or short.
~ Ctrl-I toggles joystick support on or off. Even if you have a joystick
equipped, it might not be compatible with a game this old. Personally, I always
play using just the keyboard.
~ Ctrl-M is a substitute for ENTER.
~ Ctrl-Q ends the game and returns you to DOS or Windows without saving the
case in progress.
~ Ctrl-R sends you back the sign-in screen without saving the current case.
~ Ctrl-S lets you turn off the sound. The PC speaker-based sound effects can
be noisy, so you might want to uncheck this feature.
~ Ctrl-V tells you what version of the game you're playing. If it's 1.0, watch
out for clues that mention East Germany.
Don't forget that the Escape key can be used to back up to the previous screen.
===============================================================================
Walkthrough [WALKT]
===============================================================================
In this walkthrough, I'm going to direct you through a sample case, showing the
methods and strategies used during the game. Most of these clues appear in the
actual game, although this case is shorter than they will be in actual play.
Load the game and sign in with your real name or your favorite alias. Our
briefing tells us that a masked male has stolen Freud's couch from Austria.
It's 1 P.M. Tuesday right now, so since there's a time limit of six days, we
have to catch him by 1 P.M. Monday.
Our mission begins in Vienna. There are a number of buttons on the screen, but
for now we should select the one marked "Investigate." This is where we can
search for clues regarding the suspect's whereabouts and physical appearance.
We have three options: Question Witness, Search Scene, and Call Tipster. All of
them will help us get in touch with people who know something about the case.
It doesn't matter which order you check them in, but do consider this: The
longer you stay, the more time the investigations will consume. The first
person you check will cost one hour. The second investigation takes two hours,
and the third place you investigate will set you back three hours!
Anyway, let's talk to a witness, who tells us that the suspect was traveling to
a country with one of the highest standards of living in the world. This clue
really doesn't tell us a whole lot. Just before we get ready to conduct our
next investigation, however, we get a phone call from ACME that tells us that
the suspect can't pass up a good monster movie. This is closest to being a
science fiction film, so we immediately take note.
From the main screen, click on the "Use Notebook" button, which is where we
enter information we've learned about the suspect's identity. Keep scrolling
right on the "SEX:" entry until it comes to "Male." Do likewise with "MOVIE:" -
"Sci-Fi." If you modify the wrong field, just keep scrolling until it's blank
again. When you're finished, press ENTER to save the changes (or Escape to
return to the previous screen if you make a mistake). We can't get a warrant
yet because these clues aren't sufficient to narrow the list of possible
suspects down to one.
Next we choose Search Scene, where we find a suspicious car full of counterfeit
kronas. A quick glance at a World Almanac shows there are two countries where
the krona is the preferred currency: Iceland and Sweden. This should make it
pretty easy.
We can probably go ahead and leave now. Select the "Go to Airport" option and
we're provided with a list of possible destinations - Budapest, Edinburgh, and
Stockholm. If Reykjavik had been on the list, we would've had to return to town
(costing us an extra hour) and investigated further. But fortunately, we can go
to Stockholm with confidence. The flight takes just two hours - pretty groovy
in the 21st century. Now start investigating in this new city.
Hmm... someone's spying on us from inside a trash can. This vile-looking guy is
a V.I.L.E. underling who has been summoned to keep an eye on you. When you see
people like this, you know you're going in the right direction. The suspect
himself, however, is not in this city, so we must investigate further. We call
a tipster and learn that the suspect's ancestors were half-Arab, half-Sicilian.
That sounds odd.
We drive to the airport and see four options on the menu: Bucharest, Istanbul,
Valletta, and Vienna. Vienna obviously isn't it, since we were there last time.
Istanbul is a place with lots of Muslims, so we guess that's where to go next.
In Istanbul, we talk to a witness who tells us we can find information in the
Yellow Pages. What's more, we didn't see a V.I.L.E. henchman. We're in the
wrong place, and we'll have to fly back to Stockholm to see if we can gather
more information.
This time, we talk to a witness, and we learn that the suspect was planning on
going to an island south of Italy. This clears things up. Better yet, we learn
that the suspect was seen reading a biography of Winston Churchill. On our
notebook, we note "Biography" under the "BOOK" field. At the airport, we're now
confident that Valletta in Malta should be our next stop.
In Valletta, we search the scene. This looks dangerous - a huge safe falls,
just barely missing our heads! A sarcastic V.I.L.E. agent chortles at us how we
have the "wrong combination" this time. When dangerous events like this happen,
you know you're very close to the crook! However, just finding him won't be
good enough. You can't make a valid arrest for someone if you don't have a
warrant - or if you have the warrant for the wrong person. Getting a warrant is
not all that difficult if you've been playing carefully. Go to the Crime Lab
and then select "Enter Crime Notes." If you've entered enough clues to narrow
the list down to just one possible suspect, you'll get the warrant you need. If
you haven't found enough clues, you'll be shown a list of possible suspects.
And if all possibilities are eliminated, then you know you've made some kind of
mistake entering clues. Remember that getting a warrant costs an hour of time,
in addition to the hour it costs to visit the Crime Lab, so use my dossiers to
make sure you know you can get a warrant when you try to. In general, obtaining
a warrant requires two, sometimes three, character clues (besides gender).
Usually you can get a warrant with just two clues, but occasionally you'll need
three or even all four, especially if one of the possibilities is June Bug or
Kitty Litter.
Anyway, we should now have a warrant for the arrest of Chuck Roast - a rough
name to go through life with. That's probably why he went into the crime
business. We call a tipster, and someone hands us a bomb in a box! That's what
happens when you open your presents too early (bwa ha ha). Then we talk to a
witness. A suspicious car goes flying by... with the cops just behind! If you
have a valid warrant, you'll reel Chuck in and put him in the pokey (at least
until he escapes a few cases later). You'll also be one case closer to getting
a promotion. After the message from ACME, press the Y key if you want to play
again; strike N to return to the opening screen.
===============================================================================
Dossiers [DOSSI]
===============================================================================
A very useful section.
Name Sex Hair Eyes Movie Book
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pete Moss male black brown sci-fi poetry
Matt Knife male black hazel musical mystery
Tab Stop male blond blue comedy poetry
Miles Long male blond blue western history
Chuck Roast male brown gray sci-fi biography
Chips Motherboard male brown hazel western mystery
Oly O'Leahy male red brown musical history
Luke Warmwater male red gray comedy biography
Carmen Sandiego female black brown musical biography
Kim Chee female black gray sci-fi biography
June Bug female blond gray comedy history
Kitty Litter female blond hazel comedy history
Patty Melt female brown blue western mystery
Luce Leaf female brown brown musical poetry
Lotta Style female red blue western poetry
Claire d'Loon female red hazel sci-fi mystery
Notice how each trait is evenly divided amongst all the suspects.
===============================================================================
Interpretation of Clues [CLUES]
===============================================================================
Please note that references to the male gender in this section are only
intended to promote clarity and brevity.
---Hair---
Black hair - Ebony, midnight, raven
Blond hair - Flaxen, peroxided, towhead
Brown hair - Mahogany, Mousey brown
Red hair - Auburn, carrot top, titian-haired
---Eyes---
Blue eyes - Baby-blue, eyes the color of the sky, intense blue eyes
Brown eyes - Deep brown eyes, mahogany eyes
Gray eyes - Eyes like a cloudy sky, slate eyes
Hazel eyes - Hazel eyes
---Movie---
Comedy - Eddie Murphy, Woody Allen, likes comic films
Musical - "Annie," "My Fair Lady," "The Sound of Music," likes movies with
music in it, likes movies with songs in it
Sci-Fi - Monster movies, Space-exploration flicks, "Star Wars"
Western - Roy Rogers, dreams of riding the range, idolizes cowboys, likes
movies set in the U.S., loves any movie set in the west,
---Book---
Biography - Read a book about Winston Churchill, read a De Gaulle book, likes
books about the lives of people, reads about the lives of kings
History - Read Durant's "Story of Civilization," likes reading about historic
events, looks for first editions of European history, read a book on Europe
in the Middle Ages
Mystery - An Agatha Christie fan, likes Lord Peter Wimsey detective stories,
last read "The Case of the Missing Missionary," likes to relax with a good
detective story
Poetry - Likes T.S. Eliot poems about cats, verses by Rudyard Kipling, first
editions of Tennyson, volumes of verse by Yeats
===============================================================================
Frequently Asked Questions [QUEST]
===============================================================================
Q: What are the differences between each detective rank?
A: As you progress through the ranks, cases gradually become longer and
therefore more difficult to solve. Sometimes clues become a little more obscure
on harder difficulty levels, too.
Cases to
Locations Promotion
Gumshoe 4 0
Jr. Investigator 5 1
Investigator 6 3
Sr. Investigator 7 6
Inspector 8 9
Sr. Inspector 9 13
Jr. Detective 10 17
Detective 11 22
Sr. Detective 12 27
Master Detective 13 32
Super Sleuth 14 Catch Carmen
Hall of Fame - 80
Q: How can I make the game run faster?
A: If you're still playing Carmen on your 286, you'll get a much faster
performance if you run it on a Pentium-era processor.
Q: How long does it take to complete a case?
A: It depends on the current detective rank. In game time, your time limit is
six days, regardless of your rank, but you can complete even Super Sleuth-level
cases in just four days. In terms of real-life time, for experienced players,
approximately 30-60 seconds for each location visited. Early cases can be
completed in less than five minutes; a complicated Super Sleuth case may take
15 minutes (or five if you're really skillful and a little lucky). Players who
are less proficient at geography may take considerably longer.
Q: How many locations are there in this game?
A: 32 - Amsterdam, Andorra, Athens, Belgrade, Brussels, Budapest, Bucharest,
Copenhagen, Dublin, Edinburgh, Helsinki, Istanbul, Leningrad (St. Petersburg),
Lisbon, Luxembourg, Madrid, Marseille, Munich, Oslo, Prague, Reykjavik, San
Marino, Sofia, Stockholm, Tirana, Vaduz, Valletta, Vatican City, Venice,
Vienna, Warsaw, and Zurich. That's every independent European nation as of
1990. Remember that clues pertain to the entire country (and territories, too),
not just that specific city.
Q: Why no London?
A: To the chagrin of any Scottish nationalists reading this, England and
Scotland are both considered to be part of the United Kingdom in this game.
The Scottish city of Edinburgh is the location that represents all of Great
Britain. Remember that clues that mention a red, white, and blue flag may point
toward Edinburgh.
Q: I'm having trouble with a clue. What should I do?
A: If it's a clue relating to the suspect's identifying features, check the
"Interpretation of Clues" section of this guide. As for hints about where to go
next, try looking up key names and places in an almanac, encyclopedia, atlas,
dictionary, the Rand McNally's Concise Atlas of Europe that comes with the
game, or other sources. You may find an older copy of the World Almanac and
Book of Facts to be especially helpful for things like lists of pre-Euro
national currencies and flag designs. If you can spare an hour of game time,
try using the in-game database for clues that mention flags, currencies, or
languages.
Q: I'm close to the crook, but I don't have enough clues to get a warrant. What
do I do?
A: You're probably going to have to make a guess, unless you have time to
return to your previous location in an attempt to gather more clues. Suppose
you know the suspect is female and has blonde hair. Your two possibilities are
Kitty Litter and June Bug. Fill in all of one of those suspects' features in
the crime notebook and get a warrant. After all, it's better to go with a 50-50
chance of solving the case than 0% odds.
Another option: Save your game and copy DETECTIV.DAT and the numbered save file
to another directory (the save file is ordinarily deleted when you resume the
game). Then resume the game and find out who the crook is. If you guess wrong,
copy the old save files back to the game directory and resume the game from the
same point as before. Knowing who the culprit is, solving the case will now be
a piece of cake! This "save state" trick works best on longer cases or right
before the end of a case where you're due for a promotion and you don't have
the accompanying Rand McNally's Concise Atlas of Europe. Use this trick at your
own risk.
Q: Can I issue a warrant for more than one person?
A: No. If you've gotten a warrant, and you select "Enter Crime Notes" to get a
new one, the original warrant is invalidated. You might do this if you've
forgotten whether you got a warrant earlier or if you've found new clues that
contradict earlier information (because you made a mistake or misinterpreted a
clue).
Q: Why do I have to answer a question before I get promoted?
A: This really isn't a test of your readiness for the next level; it was
intended as a deterrent for people who made unauthorized copies of the game.
This was something called "off-disk copy protection," and a fair number of
games used it in the early 1990's. It usually involved answering a question
about the manual, or in this case, a book that came with the game. But for
those of you who have lost Rand McNally's Concise Atlas of Europe, the capital
discussed on map page 80 is Stockholm. As for the color questions:
Denmark p. 28 - yellow
Bolivia p. 31 - green
Czechoslovakia p. 40 - pink
Austria p. 41 - green
Italy p. 42 - blue
Hungary p. 44 - blue
Albania p. 54 - yellow
Technically, Bolivia isn't a European country, so they probably mean Bulgaria.
A few other questions ask you to input the first bold word from a certain page
of the atlas. Really, since most of the questions are multiple-choice, and you
have three chances to answer with four possible choices, the off-disk copy
protection isn't very effective. By the way, you don't have to answer a
question when you catch Carmen and become a Super Sleuth.
Q: I tried to get a warrant, but I got an "All suspects eliminated" message.
What now?
A: This is not a good situation! See if you can remember how you got some clues
- if one was a little ambiguous or might have been recorded improperly. Try
leaving an additional evidence field empty - preferably one of the more dubious
clues. Then issue a new warrant, and if you're lucky, you'll get one.
Otherwise, use trial and error, leaving other fields blank, or just give up and
start a new case.
Q: What does V.I.L.E. stand for?
A: Villain's International League of Evil. How vile!
Q: What happens if you try to sign in using the name of a V.I.L.E. henchman?
A: You get the following message: "You have a criminal record... Access denied!"
Q: What other notes and tips do you have?
A: Here are a few miscellaneous tips, tricks, hints, and observations for this
game:
* Be quick but take your time. It's faster to check two or three possible
sources to get a more specific clue than to fly to a series of wrong locations
or to be forced to return to your original location to gather more information.
* In earlier cases, investigate each location to get sufficient character
clues to obtain a warrant; as you move up the ranks, you'll need to investigate
as quickly as possible, while still being careful to avoid going off course. As
a Super Sleuth, try to get just one clue from a location if it's specific
enough to tell you where to go next; you'll almost always get enough character
clues to obtain a warrant.
* Once you get a warrant, don't go sightseeing needlessly; only make enough
investigations (ideally one) to know where to go next.
* Identity clues only appear in messages from the Chief.
* Carmen Sandiego herself will never appear until you become a Master
Detective. For this reason, if you're following a black-haired woman who
prefers biographies, you can usually be confident it's Kim Chee, not Carmen.
* When you become a Master Detective, you'll have to catch Carmen Sandiego
before being promoted to the final rank. If you learn that your suspect is male
or doesn't have brown eyes (or otherwise can't be Carmen), don't quit the
current game, as solving these cases will still count toward reaching the Hall
of Fame.
* It can be helpful to keep notes on paper while playing. For example, you may
want to write down a certain clue or keep track of the locations you've been
to, in case you need to backtrack after making a mistake. It can also be
prudent to write down your case deadline in case you forget.
* Clues that pertain to things like crops tend to be too vague to use.
* The sign-in screen is case-insensitive (except for the first time you enter
your name), as is the Promotion Quiz entry.
* The closer a future destination is to your current location, the more
willing you should be to go there without obtaining extensive evidence. It's
more important to find many clues when traveling to a distant destination than
when you're flying to a city that's 100 miles away. Suppose you're in Monaco.
After investigating one source, you've got it narrowed down 50-50 between Vaduz
and Reykjavik. If you fly to Vaduz and guess wrong, it won't cost any more time
than it would've to gather more information. However, if you fly to Reykjavik
and find you're off track, flying back to Monaco will end up costing you a day.
* You have to sleep nine hours per day, and the sleep break never occurs while
you're traveling. You may end up waking up as late as 4 P.M.!
* Flights may take as little as one hour and as long as eleven.
* Press ENTER to skip the opening sequence. I'd watch it at least once,
though.
* There's no way to skip the cutscenes showing the V.I.L.E. henchmen and
underlings, however.
* The judge looks like Ganon or maybe Satan. Some probably are.
* The Ludwig's Castle reference does not refer to the castle atop Cookie
Mountain in Super Mario World, nor does the traditional Portuguese music refer
to any of the Zelda Fados.
* "Pilsener" beer is usually spelled "Pilsner."
* In Version 1.1, the game makers forgot to remove one reference to East
Germany in one of the screens of text for Poland.
* In the 34 cases I've completed, I've only guessed the wrong suspect a couple
of times (mostly in the earlier ranks) and ran out of time once. No, I haven't
gotten to the Hall of Fame yet, but I am a Super Sleuth.
* In the sample cases in my five Carmen Sandiego walkthroughs, the culprit has
been male three times and female twice. Sorry, ladies, you should've called
"tails."
* If this program is to be used in an educational setting, it may be
advantageous or necessary to pair students up, especially since most young
people have studied very little geography and history in the modern school
system.
Q: How many guides have you written?
A: 63, depending on how you count. Currently I'm one of the world's 20 most
prolific writers of complete FAQs. Visit
www.gamefaqs.com/features/recognition/74793.html to see the whole list of
VinnyVideo guides.
===============================================================================
Version History [VERSN]
===============================================================================
Date | Version | Size |
--------|---------|------|-----------------------------------------------------
5-22-09 | 0.4 | 30KB | Began guide. Did the title art and the review.
5-23-09 | 0.8 | 32KB | Processed a few notes and finished walkthrough.
5-24-09 | 0.9 | 32KB | Proofread and reviewed part of the guide.
5-25-09 | 1.0 | 33KB | Finished guide.
===============================================================================
Copyright [COPYR]
===============================================================================
(c) 2009 Vinny Hamilton. All rights reserved.
All copyrights mentioned in this guide are property of their respective
holders.
* You can print this guide out for your personal use.
* You can download this guide to your computer for your personal use.
* You can translate this guide into a foreign language as long as you ask
permission first.
* You can post this guide on your Web site as long as you give proper credit
AND you don't change a single letter, number, or symbol (not even a tilde). The
latest version will always be available at GameFAQs.com, but don't count on
there being frequent (if any) updates.
* You can't post this guide on your Web site and then say you wrote the guide
yourself.
* You can't post this guide on Web sites that contain (or have links to sites
that contain) explicit depictions of naked humans (also known as pornography),
racism, gambling, or flattery of totalitarian regimes.
* You can't change anything in this guide that took me so many hours to write.
If you don't comply with these guidelines, your hard drive will be reformatted
inexplicably and you will suffer from constipation for the rest of your life.
And then the zombies and/or evil mutants will get you. Heed this warning.
===============================================================================
Contact Information [CONTC]
===============================================================================
If you have any questions or comments about this guide, please send an e-mail
to VHamilton002@gmail.com. That's zero-zero-two, by the way. Remember that not
all e-mail messages will be read. Please follow these guidelines:
* Do include "Carmen Sandiego" in the subject line.
* Do send polite suggestions for ways to make this walkthrough better.
* Do tell me about any errors or omissions you find in this guide.
* Do send information about any glitches, tricks, or codes you find.
* Do ask any questions you have about Where in Europe is Carmen Sandiego
gameplay. I will respond eventually if you follow all of these rules.
* Do make a reasonable effort to use decent spelling, grammar, usage,
punctuation, and capitalization so that I can understand what you're trying to
say.
* Do use patience. I check my messages quite sporadically.
* Do not ask for technical support except as a last resort.
* Do not send spam, pornography, chain letters, "flaming," or anything that
contains profanity or vulgarity. Again, violating this rule will result in
deletion of the message and permanent constipation.
And lastly, a public service message: Fight for and affirm the rights of all
humans, regardless of race, age, or creed! And... Please keep your vows. No
one's going to read this, anyway.
For N.P.

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