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Mystery of the Missing Plants

Brooklyn Record recently posted a story about landscaping in Clinton Hill being stolen. I hadn’t heard about this before, but regular commenter ‘houseowax’ confirmed that he, too, has been a victim:

SOMEONE actually STOLE the tree out of our planter yesterday afternoon! While we were home and in broad daylight!! Apparently ( according to my neighbor) there was a rash of flora pilfering a few years back; people were reluctant to plant anything! GRRRRRR. If you see our tree, a topiary cypress around 4 ft tall- gimme a shout. Someone needs an asskicking!

WTF?

BTW, according to Google Images, a topiary cypress could look something like this Here is an actual photo of the stolen tree:

13 thoughts on “Mystery of the Missing Plants”

To be honest, every time I walk past a nice plant, flowers, or even a small tree, I wonder if it’s going to get stolen. Maybe it’s the New Yorker in me, but I wouldn’t trust enough to have anything small-medium sized outside. Maybe you should lace the tree with poison ivy or something. That would teach those f*ckers (plus unsuspecting children and animals) a life-long lesson.

This is not just happening in CH, I work in SoHo and we had all of our plants stolen including little marigolds! Planting things with thorns will work but if you go to Home Depot, they sell little alarms that you can put onto the roots of the plants that go off when pulled out of the dirt. Crazy that someone even needed to invent something like that!

when i started re-doing our front garden the summer we bought our house, four years ago, my neighbors all warned me not to plant things too close to the fence or they would get stolen! i couldn’t believe it. i decided to live dangerously and put the bleeding heart right where i wanted it, about a foot from the fence, and so far so good…. but it is just plain nuts that we have to worry about this. stealing plants! houseowax, i’m so sorry that happened.

the girls at pillow cafe used to plant beautiful flowers in front of their store, but stopped after they were stolen overnight. according to them, sometimes the thieves just threw the flowers on the floor!

vandalizing flowers and plants is a classic freudian sign of repressed sexuality. maybe the real problem is that people need to loosen up and have more sex with strangers. let’s get it on!!! hey mama, this one’s for the marigolds!!!

I feel your pain! Just four days ago, someone stole two large bushes out of our front yard on Clinton Avenue. Whoever stole it had to open our front gate, go into the front yard and PULL very hard to yank these large bushes out of the ground leaving only a few sad roots! It is just so frustrating, and infuriating when all we would like to do is create a front yard for everyone to enjoy as they stroll down our street!