Summary:

Notes:

Chapter Text

Peixes: Hunt

That isn’t really what you will be doing, since your mistress will be doing most of the work, part of which is the actual hunting. You just get to present her with targets, while your hands are tied so you don’t try anything. You don’t really understand why she bothers; your sylladex is completely empty and your Strife Specibus hasn’t held a weapon in so long, you’re pretty sure you’ve forgotten how to use it.

Your mistress once explained to you that, before she received you, she had to search the seas on the back of her lusus, which was really annoying, since she mainly uses diceKind. Since she found you, however, she has been able to hunt on the land as well, which is so much easier. You think you hated that, at first, but now you think you might be starting to feel a bit proud.

Peixes: Commune

You call one of the many nearby lusi towards you. It has to be large enough to feed Gl’bgolyb, of course. Your mistress tells you to release it when it’s close enough, so there is some actual challenge in it for her.

You used to feel really bad about leading the prey to their deaths and you’re not really sure why that changed, but you don’t anymore. Now they’re just another light you feel going out, just like all of them do eventually. It’s just the way things go.

Your mistress cackles as the tuskbeast is slain. She puts the carcass in her sylladex and you leave, leaving brown blood behind.

Peixes: Return to Hive

Your mistress drops you off at the top of her hive, tells you to tell her matesprit she’s coming over after she drops off tonight’s prize and that you should clean the place up because it looks absolutely awful.

And then she’s gone.

And you’re alone.

Now what do you do?

Peixes: Contact Miss Maryam

You’re going to do as you were told, of course.

-- cultureCultivated [CC]began trollinggoverningAristocrat [GA] --

CC: Excuse me. CC: Miss Maryam? GA: Yes? GA: What Is It Yov Desire? CC: 1’m sorry to bother you, but my mistress wanted me to 1et you know she’s on her way to you. GA: How Awfvlly Considerate Of Her. GA: Wovld Yov Like Me To Inform Her Of Yovr Condvct? CC: 1t isn’t my p1ace to ask anything of you, miss. GA: Indeed It Is Not. GA: However That Was Not The Qvestion I Posed. CC: 1’m sorry miss, 1 don’t think 1 understand. GA: I Merely Asked If Yov Wovld Like Me To Inform Her Of Yovr Performed Dvties. GA: I Most Certainly Did Not Ask Yov To Ask Anything Of Me. GA: I Am Making An Offer, Yov Can Either Accept It Or Decline It. GA: That Is All I Reqvire From Yov. CC: Then yes, 1 wou1d 1ike that. CC: Thank you, miss. GA: Excellent. GA: Natvrally, Svch An Action Does Mean That Yov Are Now In My Debt. GA: Yov Now Owe Me A Favovr. CC: What? GA: I Am Not Entirely Certain What Yov Can Offer That I Cannot Already Take At Will. GA: However, I Am Svre That Will Not Prove To Be A Significant Problem. GA: I Will Come Up With Something Appropriate As Payment For This. CC: But it can be anything? GA: Anything I Covld Predictably Reqvire From Yov. GA: Which Severely Limits The Possibilities, I Mvst Admit. GA: I Might Not Find A Vse For Yov At All. GA: In Which Case Yov Will Continve To Be In My Debt Vntil Either Of Vs Dies. GA: Preferably Yov, Althovgh One Can Never Know. CC: Do 1 actually have anything to say in the matter? CC: Because this suddenly sounds a 1ot 1ess attractive than it did just then. GA: Of Covrse Yov Do, Dear. GA: Yov Can Choose Not To Owe Me A Favovr. GA: Bvt Then I Will Not Tell Vriska That Yov Informed Me Of Her Arrival Even Thovgh She Vndovbtedly Ordered Yov To Do So. GA: I Shall Explain Yovr Choice To Yov In Simple Terms. GA: Yov Can Find Yovrself At Either The Mercy Of Yovr Mistress, Or Mine. GA: Frankly I Cannot Imagine It Being A Very Complicated Decision. CC: 1t isn’t . CC: 1 guess you te11ing my mistress the truth means 1 owe you a favor. GA: The Trvth Is Whatever My Clients Want It To Be, Peixes. GA: Sometimes Inflvenced By What I Wovld Like It To Be. CC: Then 1 wou1ld 1ike you to te11 her that 1 fo11owed her orders. GA: Consider It Done. CC: Thank you. GA: Oh No, Miss Peixes. GA: Thank Yov. CC: For what? GA: For This Most Clean Of Conversations And Tidiest Of Negotiations. GA: It Was A Very Pleasant Exchange, Wovld Yov Not Agree? CC: 1 guess? GA: Yov Shovld Certainly Consider Contacting Me Again At Some Point In The Near Fvtvre. GA: I Can Assvre Yov I Wovld Be Able To Make It Worth Yovr While. CC: With your permission, miss, 1 wou1d 1ike to 1eave now. GA: Of Covrse. GA: Do Not Let Me Keep Yov.

-- cultureCultivated [CC]ceased trollinggoverningAristocrat [GA] --

You never did talk to miss Maryam very often for reasons that are suddenly becoming very obvious to you.

While you’re busy being in shock, we will go be someone else for a moment.

Aradia: Talk to Other Friend

It’s about time you got started on this adventure, but you have to wait for a while, you guess. You’ll check for progress with your friend.

Your dead friend.

-- adventureArchaeologist [AA] began trollingcausalAnomaly [CA] --

AA: did you talk to him y3t? CA: i didAA: h3ll do it? CA: yesCA: but wwe already knew thatCA: there wwas n0 wway he wwasnt g0in t0 d0 itCA: it wwas always supp0sed t0 g0 this wwayAA: you m33n you didn’t giv3 him a choic3? CA: i didCA: its just that as far as causality is c0ncerned hed already made itAA: that do3snt mak3 any s3ns3CA: it d0esnt have t0 make sense t0 y0uCA: it d0esnt have t0 make sense t0 me eitherCA: its just the way it w0rksAA: do you r33lly think that? CA: n0CA: i kn0ww thatAA: that’s r33lly kind of d3pr3ssingAA: and i also think your3 wrongAA: causality is just kind of dumb and it simply mak3s s3ns3 for your form3r b3st fri3nd to want to h3lp youAA: i gu3ss that m33ns you w3r3 right about himCA: yes i wwasAA: you know your3 actually kind of annoying wh3n you think you know 3v3rythingCA: i d0nt kn0ww evverythinAA: 3xactly! CA: but the vv0ices d0AA: X((AA: i don’t b3l33v3 that 33th3rCA: thats 0kCA: it d0esnt actually matter if y0u believe me 0r n0tCA: its true anywayCA: it d0esnt matter what any0nes 0pini0n 0n it isAA: w3ll th3n ill just hav3 to prov3 you wrongCA: y0u cantAA: ill find a way mist3r! AA: and th3n youll hav3 to admit your3 wrong! AA: itll b3 just lik3 old tim3s! CA: 0kCA: if thats wwhat y0u wwant t0 d0 i ww0nt st0p y0uAA: its not lik3 you can >:((AA: dont th3 voic3s hav3 anything mor3 important for you to do? CA: n0t yetCA: i have t0 st0p s0methin firstAA: i m33n talk to f3f3riCA: n0CA: im n0t talkin t0 herAA: :(( AA: why not? AA: im sur3 sh3d lov3 to h33r your3 aliveAA: or at l33st aroundCA: there are reas0nsCA: they tell me n0t t0 talk t0 herCA: and als0 n0t t0 let her find 0ut im still hereCA: s0 y0u cant tell her eitherAA: but why not? CA: there are reas0nsAA: thats a stupid 3xcus3! CA: y0u wwill n0t tell herCA: this is imp0rtantCA: please d0nt tell herAA: if you giv3 m3 at l33st on3 r33sonCA: 0kCA: i d0nt pity her anym0reCA: i mean i cant pity her anym0reCA: i cant pity any0ne anym0reAA: :(( AA: i think i und3rstandAA: i wont t3ll h3rCA: thank y0uAA: i miss you 3ridanCA: i kn0wwCA: i think i miss me t00AA: ill find a way to g3t you backAA: i promis3CA: y0u cantCA: but i appreciate the sentiment anywwayAA: shut up! AA: dont you dar3 t3ll m3 what i can or cant do! AA: i will find a way to h3lp youAA: and your voic3s can go find anoth3r tomb to rot inAA: no on3 will 3v3r try to op3n it aft3rwards b3caus3 3v3ryon3 can imm3diat3ly s33 th3r3 is absolut3ly nothing in th3r3 thats worth anything to anyon3CA: i get itCA: thank y0uAA: :)) AA: your3 w3lcomeCA: y0u can expect an unwwelc0me c0nvversati0nCA: right ab0utCA: n0ww

-- causalAnomaly [CA]ceased trollingadventureArchaeologist [AA] --

Aradia: Have Unwelcome Conversation

You could imagine, as soon as he said it, what that conversation was going to be and the description was not at all wrong.

Oh well, you might as well brave her immediately, instead of letting her get the pleasure of thinking you’re afraid to talk to her.

AC: ::::3 hiiiiiiii aradia! AA: what do you want? AC: ::::3 well since you askedAC: ::::3 i want to know why i cant play with my second favorite toy! AA: thats the 33th tim3 youv3 ask3d thatAA: and im still not going to answ3r you so i dont und3rstand why you still both3rAC: ::::( now im all sadAC: ::::( i really hoped you would tell me tonight aradiaAC: ::::3 but thats okay! AC: ::::3 i have another question to askAC: ::::3 and i think this one is more important even than the most important question i just askedAA: that mak3s no s3ns3AA: how can a qu3stion b3 mor3 important than th3 most important qu3stion? AC: ::::3 beclaws this question is more important nowAC: ::::3 but the most important question is more important at every other timeAC: ::::3 also beclaws i said soAA: ughAA: just ask your stupid qu3stion and l33v3AC: ::::3 well i cant really do thatAC: ::::3 i want you to answer the question too! AA: and if i dont your3 just going to k33p annoying m3 about it? AC: ::::3 yes! AC: ::::3 you understand me so well aradia! AA: fin3AC: xxxx3 thank you aradia! AC: ::::3 see i was talking to terezi earlierAC: ::::3 and she was really busy with somethingAC: ::::( but she wouldnt tell me what she was so busy withAC: ::::( all she said was that it was kind of a big dealAA: and this is r3l3vant to m3 how? AA: i m33n is this going anywh3r3 or is th3 punchlin3 anoth3r stupid flarp storyAC: ::::3 shut up and ill tell you! AC: ::::3 i thought you greenbloods were at least supposed to be patientAC: ::::3 that is pretty much your only redeeming qualityAC: xxxxP youre perfectly happy with waiting to get your punishmentAC: ::::3 also you totally love my flarp stories and dont even try to deny itAC: ::::3 its the closest to any real flarping experience youre going to getAC: ::::3 maybe you can even learn something from themAC: ::::3 like how to protect your teammatesAA: can w3 pl33se mov2 onAC: ::::o am i making the little kitty angry? AC: ::::3 i wouldnt want to do thatAA: you and your scourg3 sist3r think your3 just th3 high3st tr33s th3 for3st has to off3r dont youAA: but l3ts fac3 it you only got him through an ambush whil3 h3 was doing som3thing compl3t3ly diff3r3ntAC: ::::3 but that just means were super smartAA: you couldnt 3v3r b33t 3ith3r of us in a fair fightAA: and your3 n3v3r going to g3t m3AA: b3caus3 i own this for3stAA: it is min3 and whil3 im h3r3 you cant hurt m3AC: ::::3 do you think equius would let me burn your forest down? AC: ::::3 i mean i guess sollux would complainAC: ::::3 but hed understand its for the greater good right? AA: you wouldnt dar3AC: ::::3 why not? AC: ::::3 youre probably rightAC: ::::3 i cant beat you in your forest since you still have that magical thing that protects youAC: ::::3 and i dont think i can get you out of your forestAC: ::::3 so i guess ill just have to get rid of the forest itselfAC: ::::3 but i have to ask equius firstAC: ::::3 wow you managed to distract me again! AC: ::::3 i had a question to askAC: ::::3 terezi dropped some hints that maybe you lowbloods knew something about what she was doingAC: ::::3 and i thought that was sillyAC: ::::? because why would you lowbloods know anything? AC: ::::( but its the only lead i haveAC: ::::( and karkitty was no real helpAC: ::::3 he never isAC: ::::3 so do you know what terezi is doing? AA: no! AA: i don’t know what t3r3zi is doingAA: i dont 3v3n talk to h3r at allAA: why would i know about anything you and your crazy girlfri3nd ar3 doing? AC: ::::( okayAC: ::::3 thanks anywayAC: ::::3 ill talk to you later aradiaAA: just l33v3 m3 alon3

What does that girl even want with you anyway? You know you hate her. Hell, you’re even willing to admit to yourself that maybe you hate her that way, but she-

She just-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

She’s teasing you, that’s what she’s doing. And that’s giving her the benefit of the doubt that she’s doing it on purpose, which you’re still not sure of.

And instead of reciprocrating like a normal troll she just riles you up and then leaves you hanging. Confused, angry and unsatisfied.

You feel an overwhelming urge to throw something and one of your trophy skulls hits a wall of your cave and, thankfully, doesn’t shatter.

It didn’t help.

Aradia: Calm Down

That sounds like a really good idea right now.

You’re going to go for a walk and forget all about that insane troll and her infuriating mannerisms that you absolutely despise with every fiber of your being. Damnit.

The worst part is that you’re fairly certain she would burn down the forest just to get at you, which means that if she does hate you that way, she really doesn’t understand how that sort of thing goes.

No! You were going to stop thinking about her and go outside for a walk and oh for the love of the two moons now what?

You don’t even know what that’s supposed to mean. You’re pretty sure that half of his speeches meant he doesn’t even believe in luck.

Okay, that really isn’t fair. You should not be taking this out on him. Eridan’s in a way worse situation than you are and it doesn’t do either of you any good if you start blaming him for your romantic troubles.