A place for art, writing, music performance, and reflections on mental health and addiction.

Artwork Friday #1: “Still Alice” in pencil

So this is my drawing of Julianne Moore in “Still Alice”. Let me give you a bit of a background.

I decided to go see this movie myself. Julianne Moore, in my opinion, is the greatest living actress. Idol, Queen, Icon, she is my star. So I simply had to see the movie. Well it was a terrible idea to go alone.

The movie is about Julianne’s character getting early onset Alzheimer’s disease, and after about 30 minutes in, I started sobbing, and could not stop. Even after it was over, I hung my head and cried while the credits rolled. I crossed the street to my favorite coffee shop, and cried. And then I decided to sketch it out.

See, my grandmother raised me. She was my mother. And she has dementia. She won’t remember my name. She will get lost from the bathroom to her bed (literally just one left turn). All of our photo albums are labeled. And Julianne’s performance echoed my grandmother’s behavior so perfectly. I couldn’t help but sob.

I think Alzheimer’s is the worst thing that can happen to a person. Early onset, in your 50s, like in this film, that’s unimaginable. But I imagine grandparents– they lived life. They grew up, fell in love, made a family, had careers, watched their children grow up and make families, watched their grandchildren be born….. And then one day nobody needs them anymore. One day they just end up laying around the house, useless. And all they have left, ALL they have left to comfort them, is their memories. And Alzheimer’s, or dementia, takes that away. That, to me, is the saddest thing in the world, and it breaks my heart.

Anyway, I know this sketch doesn’t look much like Julianne. Give me some credit, I did it in 15 minutes in a coffee shop. I mainly wanted to capture the look of confusion. Plus, I’m new to colored pencils. I’ve only been using them a few times. So you will see more artwork soon. Thank you, as always, for listening.

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About the Author

Hi, my name's Gabriel, but you can call me Gabe. I'm 21 years old and reside in the Queen City of the west, Cincinnati. I'm a jack of all trades (and a master of none) when it comes to art-- I fancy myself a pianist, a painter, and a poet/writer. In free time I am a prolific reader, I love to watch old, classic, forgotten movies, and I thrive on theater productions. I also live with severe bipolar disorder and anxiety, which makes it hard to know what I'll even be posting each day. I'd like this blog to be a mixture of everything-- my painting, my writing, my piano playing, and reflections on my state of mind. I chose the title "Too Many Minds," because as you'll see if you follow me, there's more than one, two, or three sides to me.