The diction of ecstasies

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My mom called me today.. scared of the dream, she had last night ! i’m her same little kid again.. ‘n she had lost me somewhere she was choking.. while telling me, this terrible excuse to call during my ‘busy’ office hours

Couldn’t tell her but really wanted to cry out loud “mom, you don’t have to.. find a reason to call, ‘n i’ll always be your same little kid, wanting you to make me calm,
every time i fall..” instead i’m writing this.. as an excuse of being big ‘n tall

i love u, mom ! ‘n really, i’m lost.. trying hard to be the same, little kid once again.. with no excuses at all..!!

Sometimes, I know..
things are out of reach,
sometimes, I show..
how hard I’ve tried,
sometimes, I throw..
even things I’ve got,
just to get the dream..
‘n for the rest of the time,
I wait.. for the miracle !
though I know..
me gonna take away ‘nothing’
the risk, always seems..
as if it’s larger than life !

Sometimes, I wonder..
how far I can go
sometimes, I’ve tried..
to spread my wings,
‘n make the fly..
sometimes, I dunk..
into the deep driven ocean,
‘n for rest of the time
I stay still.. waiting
the ocean to go dry..

“The time you enjoy wasting..
is not wasted time”

‘n as if I’ve the whole life,
just to waste ‘n to wait..
for the dream, I’ve waited for
Some where waiting.. for me !!

I tried to play the song..“Baby when you’re gone..”
Cleared the dust..
tuned.. my guitar,
tied the chords..
hit the strings..
hell.. that too sounds like
the broken thing..
like a ruptured soul,
with broken wings…
then I sung the next line

“days go on ‘n on
and night seems so long”

Picked up the pencil..
and the kit, tried to sketch
the beauties around..
my barren harvest..
the torment dusk
but no dawn..
hell.. that’s all, I could find..

“oh, this is torture, this is pain,
it feels like I’m gonna go insane”

my broken woes..
torn, horrid sketches..
the broken string..
and that song,
like the husky..
whisper in the distance..