(Caption "This film has been modified from its original version. It has been formatted to fit this screen.")

(Close-up on a town)

Bandit: Alright, everyone! This is a stickup. Don't anybody move. Now empty the villagers!

(Blue words on black background "Villager-emptying in progress")

Alvin: Yeah, but, I'm dressed like a pirate.

Simon: Then do a Pirate Silly Song.

Alvin: No!

Bandit: See ya later, boys. I hope you like water with your lunches!

Alvin: I believe you have something that belongs to them.

Bandit: (gets shaken)

Radio in Policeman's Car: I am not your friend...

Policeman: (singing along) I am not your friend...

(Bandit falls into car)

Policeman: Aah! It's another space alien.

Alvin: (lays on floor)

(Caption "ABC Digital Video Enterprises presents")

Andy: You saved the day again, Alvin.

Alvin: I guess they most like me.

(Title shows up)

Pea: Make way for Alvin - the King's right-hand-man!

(People stare at him)

Alvin: Why did the chicken cross the road?

(People stare at him)

Alvin: I don't know.

(Caption "Stand up with Alvin.")

Dave: Boo!

(Yellow words on black background "Moving on...")

Alvin: Heh-ee... It had to rhyme!

Dave: Oh come on, you guys. It's only a recording session.

Alvin: Don't question the King's grammar!

Dave: Maybe I'll even let you play your harmonica, Alvin.

Alvin: Now go and get that duck! Uh, young lady... (Throws suitcase) You are a guh-nat.

(Blue words on white background "The next morning...")

Sven: Not so fast, don't take another hop. We know where you've been and we think it's gotta stop.

Lyle: Huh?

Ottar: We Vikings rule the seas. We pillage and attack. We never say please. And we never give stuff... back!

Sven; Not to mention the potholders.

(Alvin looks scared)

(Caption "The end.")

(Alvin smiles)

(Caption "Just kidding. That's not how it ends.")

Mr. Dooley: We're looking for a man. A dangerous man. Have you seen him?

(Caption "If you don't like it, don't watch it Dooley.")

Alvin: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

King George: I want it.

Louis: What? The house?

King George: No. The harmonica.

(Caption "The night before...")

Captain Cuke: Kiss me!

Luna: I will never KISS you!

Alvin: You're in trouble old pal.

(Door opens and closes)

(Moe stutters)

(Caption "The end.")

Tomato Sawyer: Hang on, Little Jimmy. Help is on the way!

Alvin: Eh, no wait. Oh, never mind.

(Title "A Chipmunk Christmas - The YouTube Poop.")

Minn: The park guy isn't from New York. He's really working for Professor Rattan whose been following me this whole time, and I don't think there really is a rogue band of Canadian barrel-makers. They made that whole thing up to trick me. I'm coming home now.

Larryboy: I've been driving around all day. I'm tired. I'm hungry. I gotta go to the bathroom. This suit is very constricting. Now Rattan can rule the world cause he's got all the power!