Balloon Boy: A nation turns its lonely eyes to you

When you woke up this morning, did you think you'd be riveted by the story of a Fort Collins kid who may or may not have floated away in a silvery balloon? And if so, are you being treated for assorted ailments at the Capitol Hill Medicine Shoppe ?

At this point, none of the reporters with the approximately seven gazillion media outlets covering this bizarro tale know what the hell's going on, including our colleagues at the Village Voice, who've been breathlessly updating each development, from the revelation that the Heene family at the center of this drama recently appeared on the TV series Wife Swap to the fact that the missing boy, named (naturally) Falcon, can be seen in the YouTube video above rapping about "pussification." Oh yeah: There's already a website up called WhereIsBalloonBoy.com. And thus, a legend was born -- or something like that.