Move over #cleaneating there's a new pretentious foodie buzzword – #blumenthalbabble. What it lacks in green smoothie and kale references, it makes up for with home cooking chemistry terms.

Just thank your macerated strawberries this mad scientist-slash-Michelin man-slash-eyewear enthusiast is only here for a week. Any longer and Lucy may be up on stalking charges, Rishi may hurt himself showing off by juggling blenders and beakers of nitrogen and Daniel may forget his native northern beaches tongue.

Tonight Rishi, Christina and Daniel will compete for immunity. The only thing at stake is the viewer's humanity.

To get their sticky fingers on that little golden pin all they have to do is, "Beat one of the greatest living chefs in the world," according to Matt while Heston pocket dials his Queen's Counsel ordering they draw up 13 AVO's.

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"It is possible," Gaz, who is only famous for knowing how to braise the face of a cow, chimes in.

As the winners of the Jubilee trifle pressure test, our three comrades, brimming with false hope they can slay the man behind The Fat Duck with skills they've honed in their suburban Ikea kitchenettes, are given 90 minutes to create an entrée, main and dessert. Heston must cook all three dishes, Hans Solo.

Daniel is on entrée and is hoping for a "game bird", he then remembers he's in the MasterChef kitchen and not cruising the main drag of Manly on a Saturday night, so settles for eggs instead.

Christina, in charge of main, receives a gift from the grape God and is handed a case of wine. She is sweating and salivating at the same time.

Dessert man Rishi says he loves dessert but isn't a pastry chef, however, as a public servant in these uncertain times, it may be time to start diversifying his skill set. There's no way sweet tooth Tony would get rid of a man who can crunch numbers and bust out a tray of cannoli at the same time.

Both Rishi and Heston are happy with the dairylicious main ingredient for the final dish.

While Daniel has decided he'll make breakfast, he all of sudden starts to evacuate himself, but the only thing coming out is #blumenthalbabble.

"Deconstructed!" he cries. "Textural elements!" he sings. "Setting agent!" he decrees, before confirming he'll be producing the perfect 62-degree egg and the headline of his Mum's biweekly newsletter every major newspaper in the world will scream, "Boy from northern beaches beats Heston... Blumenthal".

Meanwhile, as Rishi is popping champagne like he's The Wolf of Queanbeyan and gets a start on the granita base of his ice cream snowman, Christina is lost in the pantry.

Instead of crying into a cup of cabernet she grabs handfuls of chicken drumsticks and beef fillets before running back to her station to ponder the age-old question every single woman in her late 20s already has the answer to, "What goes with wine?"

Instead of serving up three-day old Lite Jarlsberg on a slightly stale Cruskit, she opts for pan-seared eye fillet with vegetables and a Madeira wine jus.

Before Heston heads into the pantry, George, who is more Rocky Road than Rhodes Scholar tonight pipes up, "Can we ask, what's going through your mind right now?"

"A few things."

He then whispers to the producers about a few issues he has. One being his "mind", the second being Lucy's leering and the other is the fact he doesn't know where anything is.

He's back on track after a commercial break where Sandra Sully points out, "These are the men and women you don't want on your streets." Here's looking at you, Kelty.

As Daniel, Christina and Rishi promise to heed Heston's warning of keeping it simple, the man with the goggles is discussing the compound make up of skim milk powder while adding a dash of nitrogen to his yoghurt ice cream and frozen peas to his chicken infused main.

"Oh you could totally do that at home!" Rocky Road scholar George exclaims as Heston begins to smoke his mackerel entrée on a bed of hay over the grill.

There's a crash over by the freezer and through the mist storms Rishi carrying a tray, screaming, "Look at my snow!"

Ah, you can take the boy out of the public service but you can never take the public service out of the boy.

After Heston throws down the nitrogen gauntlet, Rishi decides he too wants to make his ice cream "super frozen". I'm not sure whether his high-pitched shrieking, "Look at me! Look at me Heston!", was to capture old mate Heston's attention or because his snowman will be garnished with his macerated, frozen fingers.

While Rishi is frolicking in the snow, Daniel is playing with fire. He's mastered his 62-degree soft poached egg and mushroom custard (served in a jar... of course) and decides to smoke it. With a blowtorch in one hand and what looks like an apparatus Ben Cousins would be familiar with in the other, he seals the jar with a smoky kiss.

Christina is, thankfully, not foetal but in a bit of a pickle with her pickle, which she is plating up with less than five minutes to go.

At the 20-second mark, it appears Heston has not completed anything. However, the magic of television ensures his hay smoked mackerel with salmon roe, braised chicken with sherry and strawberry sundae are served to Gaz and Matt. Who both sound like they have enjoyed either a Thesaurus palate cleanser or a tequila slammer before coming on set.

Highlights include, "This is a much more 'cheffy' dish" and, "This dish just isn't whimsical enough".

Unsurprisingly Heston wins all three rounds, mainly thanks to his strawberry sundae.

If his ice cream is the Pippa Middleton of the immunity challenge then Rishi's snowman is the Susan Boyle... before Simon Cowell got to her.

The only winner was Heston's ego but Daniel was deemed the best of the plebs. He will go on to be "Heston's right hand" as Heston Week rolls on. At the time of deadline, Ten had not confirmed what Heston's "right hand" does. I've bet you $5 and a Mars bar it's the one he wipes his glasses with.

10 comments so far

It's just cooking not alchemy. The more high brow and mystical they make it seem the more money they make. People who go to his restaurants are on company chit no doubt, why else would you pay for such experiments.

Commenter

Big Artie

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 10:27AM

I have to say well done, the first two MC contestants did outstanding.

But I was most impressed by Heston. The first comment about it all being about science and only business men on junkits go to his restaurants is totally untrue.

Last night was a rarity. We actually got to see one of these superstar chefs put up against it in competition with no forewarning of what he was cooking and he utterly shone as a chef.

Remember he is self taught, I thought his dishes looked fantastic, that 2 MC contestants - even with extra time - came that close to him was a credit to them.

Commenter

Julian

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 11:17AM

Who else reckons Lucy and Heston hooked up not long after this episode?!?! There was something going on there!

Commenter

jinikay

Location

Sydney

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 11:28AM

I'm not convinced that the was "no forewarning", Heston used the A2 milk which was also highly promoted during the ad breaks .

I must admit though that if he cooked up that 3 course meal for me at home (and did the dishes) I would have been delighted.

I do wish George and Gary would simply "shut up" some times, I rarely watch the show these day because of them.

Commenter

Kris

Location

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 12:00PM

George, that scarf mate. Worn like a bondi hipster...

Commenter

Julian

Location

Manly

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 12:36PM

I'm sure that he used the A2 milk because that would have been the brand they had in the fridge. No forewarning necessary there, just make sure it's your sponsors stuff in the fridge.

Heston has taken Food Technology and directed its extractive, synthesis and constructive capabilities to win over the hearts and minds of the cuisine as art crowd.

Commenter

Jenny

Location

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 12:36PM

people really didn't watch Heston last night did they!

He was a contestant on the show for 90 mins and smashed it

Commenter

Julian

Location

Manly

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 1:11PM

I's Warhol, not Warehol and there were none of these techniques you referred to used last night. He did supercool his icecream using liquid nitrogen but then so did Rishi. Other than that there were no techniques used that couldn't be done in a home kitchen (even using the hay).

Commenter

Anthony

Location

Date and time

August 06, 2013, 3:54PM

Great recap, I do love Heston, I have the DVD cook like Heston, and as much as I would not serve an edible garden, I use his simple white wine sauce method, and his steak cooking , the humble meat pattie and his stock pot ideas! Really good cooking tonight, wish it wasn't so over produced/edited/hashed.....give me a failure, not perfect benches with plates appearing magically!