Television has kinda ruined film bildungsromans for me. A film like The Kings of Summer or The Way, Way Back, I dig the characters and I dig the world, but I wish it was 10 hours longer so that character development felt more natural. As is, I am left unsatisfied.

At Berkeley is a documentary film about the University of California at Berkeley. The film explores the major aspects of university life of America's premier public university with particular emphasis on the administrative efforts to maintain the academic excellence, public role, and the economic, racial and social diversity of the student body in the face of severe budgetary cuts imposed by the California legislature.

Who wants to watch that?

Better question: Why would you document that?

I'm surprised that BART let Fruitvale Station film at its Fruitvale station – at the exact location where a BART police officer shot Oscar Grant.

Beard Beer
Rogue Ales brewmaster John Maier discovered that the wild yeast growing in his beard could be cultivated to a state suitable for fermenting beer.

If you manage to get past the mental block that goes with drinking an ale with human beard yeast in it, you'll find a very fruity beer that smells and tastes of ripe bananas and pineapple.

You know what really grinds my gears? Fancy taquerias that don't allow you to mix and match tacos. If I'm paying $12 for two tacos, I don't want to eat two of the same taco! And they're typically unfilling too.

I have yet to eat a taco with shredded meat that wasn't wretched. Similarly: Corn tortillas. The leathery texture…bleh. #teamflour

On the first day of a summer school English class, the instructor asked each student to fill out an index card with information about themself, and draw a self-portrait on the back. After gazing at my self-portrait, I noted that it "looks like Ben Stiller."

Little did I know that the instructor would go through said index cards in front of the class.

"Looks like Ben Stiller? Who's Ben Stiller?"
"Uhh… He's an actor, and a director. He directed The Cable Guy."
[crickets]

Now Ben Stiller was not unknown in 1996. He had had a show on network television with his name in the title, and he was one of the leads in Reality Bites, and he had just hosted the MTV Movie Awards.

Idea: A Netflix-like service for sporting events. I'm surprised one doesn't exist yet. Every sport, every game ever, in its entirety, on demand. Subscribe as fan, a scholar, or a scout. Watch with the original commentary or just natural audio (if available).

—The search feature could be hyper customizable. Like, I'd want to see all the catches Randy Moss made of over 40 yards; and then it shows a list and u can view the games the plays are from or just the plays themselves.
—Or a different query, like show me all goals Wayne Gretzky scored from a Mark Messier assist or w/e.
—The search fields would differ from sport to sport; you could search football plays by formations that a specific team runs, just look at a guys at-bats when there's two outs in late innings.

Whenever I pitch an idea to Mike, I am flabbergasted by where he runs with it.

—I've been thinking a lot about that plane crash theme park ride.
—You could cater to different market segments; families could be split apart, new couples together, all singles on one side, a 50/50 race split.
—And they'd have to beat the other side in some competition.
—Could be capture the flag or some Survivor rigamarole.

—Choosing the landscape/cityscape over which the plane would break up would be a lot of fun as well.
—New York and Las Vegas are the obvious favorites. Chicago would be pretty dope. Sydney. A volcano.

[pause]

Last night, I dreamt that I was scraping my teeth off like seeds on the walls inside a pumpkin, which led to dreaming about pulling my face off my skull like my head was slow-cooked pork.

RT: Did that lady go through the trouble of making a full three-bean salad just to dump it on Lyle Lovett's desk? That shit is hardbody. (The Bridge, S01E02)

"A.C.R.O.N.Y.M.: A Criminal Regiment of Nasty Young Men." (Futurama, S07E19)

"[My biography] has to sing off the page. I'm talking Rikki-Tikki-Tavi, or early George."
"George?"
"Curious? Later George just wallows in its own density."
"Something like The Berenstain Bears Visit the Dentist?"
"Visit the Dentist is beach reading. Sure, I'm along for the ride, but is it transcendent in any way? Besides, it's totally derivative of Aardvark." (Wilfred, S03E06)

"This is like the Valentine's Day of emoji movies." (Comedy Bang! Bang!, S02E02)

Why doesn't Major League Baseball adopt the pitch tracking technology that its television partners use and standardize strike zones? The home plate umpire could still arbitrate a checked swing, or safe/out at home.

Rory: Home plate Vanna White after Wheel of Fortune digitized its board.

Instead of a Home Run Derby, Idea: Find a golf course near the All-Star Game venue. Pair eight power hitters with eight golf stars. The hitters slug baseballs down fairways and then the golfers complete the holes, replacing baseballs, wherever they lie, with golf balls.

10-28-05
A long time ago, while perusing IMDb, I stumbled upon a film called 5-25-77, the release date for Star Wars classic. The film's website offered little information, but the production company granted my request for a copy of the script. This is Almost Fanboy, I thought.

R.I.P. my six-year-old MacBook Pro. Apple refused to repair it because it is "vintage."

[pause]

By that logic, Ed Hardy = vintage clothing.

I saw a bloke on the street wearing this shirt:

Vintage Nets fan.

[browsing UCLA apparel]

Yeesh. These designs…

Vintage Adam Riff™:
During telecasts of collegiate athletic events, you will see ads, or "institutional spots," for each participating school. Idea: Institutional spots created by filmmaker alumni. I'm curious how Wes Anderson would sell Texas or how Judd Apatow would sell USC.

Similarly, colleges with design programs [cough] should commission some apparel designed by design students. Low risk, high reward.

Adam Robot owns a screen printing press and verbally committed to making me an Animal House "COLLEGE" shirt that reads "CORREGE" instead.

I'm not sure I could bring myself to wear it in public, though.

Pepe: Says the man who showed up to high school one day in blackface.Jon: That was unintentional blackface!

Pepe: Says the man who spent the Halloween after September 11 looking like this.Jon: Okay, that I can't defend. Vintage Jon?

Starting in September, visitors to Universal Studios Florida will step into the "Cabin in the Woods."

Halloween Horror Nights creative director Mike Aiello describes the flow of the haunted house maze experience as a "chronological retelling of the film from beginning to relative end – minus the gods destroying the Earth." [source]