Disney Sees Dollar Signs In the Maternity Ward

Babies! We all love cute little babies! You know who else loves babies? The Walt Disney Company. In fact, Disney loves babies so much that they've struck a deal to creep up on newborns and their parents in the hospital.

The Times has the disturbing details of Disney's latest encroachment into our everyday lives, which the company calls Disney Baby. For the past month, Disney Baby has been operating in nearly 600 maternity wards across the U.S., handing out free onesies — the Disney Cuddly Bodysuit — to vulnerable parents. Talk about a captive audience! Robert A. Iger, CEO of Disney, told the Times: "If ever there was an opportunity for a trusted brand to enter a market and provide a better product and experience, it's this." No shit! So how exactly is Disney peddling its latest wares?

In bedside demonstrations, the bilingual representatives extol the product's bells and whistles — extra soft! durable! better sizing! — and ask mothers to sign up for e-mail alerts from DisneyBaby.com. More than 200,000 bodysuits will be given away by May, when Amazon.com is set to begin selling 85 styles for a starting price of $9.99 for two; Nordstrom and Target will follow with more Disney Baby items, including hats.

We're guessing that this is just a precursor to Disney offering 3D birth videos, ripped straight to Blu-ray, right in the delivery room. Maybe they'll even sell naming rights for your new baby! How great would it be to name your kid Thumper? They would surely thank you later in life.