10 magical days of pF storyline that shouldn't need to make sense

Hello there fellas, i did some fooling around in Ideone.com and made a randomly generated "story" in Java.

I added an input list where i just added names of various members around the community to get some interaction in there. Then i just made a few loops in order to get through the days and call the events, in which randomized a bunch of numbers in order to get the different outputs. It was one of the more simpler things one could do probably.

I was planning on doing more, but typing the so called "story-line" stuff didn't end up well so i left out a bunch of stuff i had already prepared. (like various variables that would affect the output)

== DAY 1 ==
Dharkk bled out after getting pumped so, so hard by Dani.
Meeko went up to Fluffeh and punched him in the nutsacks.
LC said that Seeker smelled like fresh cheese farts to Momo
Dillinger is feeling down because Agent's rejection.
Welsper is so happy because all of his friends are dead, including Taters.
Haplo made a pickle sandwich, thinking deep thoughts about Zenzr
Bender went to Nezumi's house, masturbated on his door and left.
Tony said that Zoey smelled like fresh cheese farts to Luffaren
Billy feels good after smoking Fluffeh's left nipple.
Detonator feels horrible for the things Dillinger did 7 years ago.
Meeko went up to Welsper and punched him in the nutsacks.
Fluffeh punched Billy super duper hard, but later recieved a punch from Penguin.

== DAY 2 ==
Bender overdosed on viagra in a desperate attempt to please Kyle.
Brian masturbated in the shower and is therefore much, much, MUCH cleaner than Penguin.
Meeko is super pissed on Luffaren because of the chinese economy
Zoey doesn't feel any emotions anymore because Dillinger did too much tickling.
Taters is happy because winning over Rupert in mario party, that dirty pleb.
Josh is so happy because all of his friends are dead, including Zoey.
Katana masturbated in the shower and is therefore much, much, MUCH cleaner than Seeker.
Meeko got into an intense, yet sexy catfight with Penguin.
Dharkk bled out after getting pumped so, so hard by Bender.
Dani is super pissed on Momo because of the chinese economy
Welsper found an energy potion, brewed by Brian, the master of rubbing doorknobs.
Nezumi cried to sleep because Luffaren touched in bad places
Rupert is super pissed on Anathema because of the chinese economy
Meeko went up to Meeko and punched him in the nutsacks.
Zoey doesn't feel any emotions anymore because Peter did too much tickling.

== DAY 3 ==
LC is happy because Kyle told that Rupert told that Luffaren told that LC smells better than Katana.
Secprotocol had a sex dream about putting a doorknob into Haplo's butthole.
Detonator is super sad for no reason.
Brian made a pickle sandwich, thinking deep thoughts about Agent
LC won the lottery of 20$!
Rupert took a grand shit in Brian's mailbox.
Nezumi cried, cried and cried womanly tears for Kyle who recently got addicted to PCP.
Seeker made a pickle sandwich, thinking deep thoughts about Bender
Josh is so happy because all of his friends are dead, including Momo.
Josh feels like a pretty little princess after last nights 'spooning' with Fluffeh.

== DAY 4 ==
Dani went berserk on Josh's ass.
Josh felt a slight sense of happiness since masturbating to pictures of Enviolinador.
Retslag said hi to Dani, the local paperboy plebian.
Nezumi pooped behind the shed.
Luffaren is thinking about murdering Peter.
LC feels good after smoking Josh's left nipple.
Taters is feeling a wondrous relief ever since murdering Billy.
Penguin had a sex dream about putting a doorknob into Billy's butthole.
Momo said that Dharkk smelled like fresh cheese farts to Dillinger
Kyle punched Kyle super duper hard, but later recieved a punch from Brian.
Dani pooped himself in furious anger because Momo stole all the cheerios.
Zenzr got farted on by Kyle.
Dillinger cried to sleep because Seeker touched in bad places
Haplo pooped behind the shed.

== DAY 5 ==
Kyle's jerbles are merbled beyond rustling because Dharkk drank all the capri-sun.
LC feels good after smoking Penguin's left nipple.
Peter pooped behind the shed.
Luffaren is thinking about murdering Billy.
Retslag made sweet, sweet love to Tony, after injecting the drugs of course.
Secprotocol masturbated into Secprotocol's coffe mug due to being extra frisky today.
Billy is happy because Dharkk told that Secprotocol told that Josh told that Billy smells better than LC.
Josh is having the time of his life, fiddling around in Meeko's purse
Haplo said that Zoey smelled like fresh cheese farts to Billy
Fluffeh witnessed Detonator, the love of his life do.. 'things' to Bender.
Josh won the lottery of 20$!

== DAY 6 ==
Meeko went up to Dharkk and punched him in the nutsacks.
Seeker said hi to Meeko, the local paperboy plebian.
Brian doesn't feel any emotions anymore because Tony did too much tickling.
Meeko took a grand shit in Taters's mailbox.
Retslag overdosed on viagra in a desperate attempt to please Momo.
Luffaren pooped himself in furious anger because Agent stole all the cheerios.
Welsper won the lottery of 20$!

== DAY 7 ==
Nezumi went out for a jog and ran into Billy. they started talking about birds.
Agent went to Momo's house, masturbated on his door and left.
Taters is super sad for no reason.
Fluffeh made a pickle sandwich, thinking deep thoughts about Billy
Zoey pooped behind the shed.
Welsper is happy because winning over Welsper in mario party, that dirty pleb.
Welsper is so happy because all of his friends are dead, including Kyle.
Nezumi met Taters in math class today. It was alright.
Zenzr masturbated in the shower and is therefore much, much, MUCH cleaner than Fluffeh.

== DAY 8 ==
Bender got insanely aroused just by listening to Josh's soothing voice.
Detonator got farted on by Enviolinador.
Brian made sweet, sweet love to Rupert, after injecting the drugs of course.
Anathema watched some good ol'e granny porn with Agent, Agent and Josh.
Billy felt a slight sense of happiness since masturbating to pictures of Anathema.
Josh is happy because Seeker told that Kyle told that LC told that Josh smells better than Penguin.
Bender got insanely aroused just by listening to Katana's soothing voice.
Kyle's jerbles are merbled beyond rustling because Josh drank all the capri-sun.
Dharkk cut Enviolinador's dick off because of feeling down.
LC tried to escape the sadness by doing meth but had a bad trip.
Detonator met Bender in math class today. It was alright.
Dani's jerbles are merbled beyond rustling because Dillinger drank all the capri-sun.
Tony found an energy potion, brewed by Dani, the master of rubbing doorknobs.
Josh got insanely aroused just by listening to Retslag's soothing voice.

== DAY 9 ==
Meeko's jerbles are merbled beyond rustling because Zenzr drank all the capri-sun.
Anathema bled out after getting pumped so, so hard by Katana.
Welsper felt a slight sense of happiness since masturbating to pictures of Welsper.
Peter masturbated in the shower and is therefore much, much, MUCH cleaner than Josh.
Welsper is happy because LC told that Welsper told that Taters told that Welsper smells better than Meeko.
Agent had a sex dream about putting a doorknob into Luffaren's butthole.
Penguin witnessed Tony, the love of his life do.. 'things' to LC.
Brian spent the entire day learning the secret art of chinese seduction in order to impress Momo.
Dharkk cried to sleep because Dillinger touched in bad places
Agent bled out after getting pumped so, so hard by Josh.
Seeker doesn't feel his legs, therefore starts to smell slightly like Bender.
Brian masturbated into Secprotocol's coffe mug due to being extra frisky today.
Dharkk is crying so hard because Dani offended Brian in a super mean way.
Enviolinador masturbated into Rupert's coffe mug due to being extra frisky today.
Peter got farted on by Zoey.
Dillinger is crying so hard because Seeker offended Tony in a super mean way.
Tony found an energy potion, brewed by Kyle, the master of rubbing doorknobs.

== DAY 10 ==
Everyone died because Kyle didn't get enough marbles for his collection.
Game over, thanks for playing!

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Just a note, i have no clue if this would even belong in this sub-forum, as there's currently 2 threads in here.
Please don't murder me in my sleep.

Zoey doesn't feel any emotions anymore because Peter did too much tickling. Luffaren is thinking about murdering Peter. Peter masturbated in the shower and is therefore much, much, MUCH cleaner than Josh.

I've decided to recreate this from scratch and make it much more broad in detailing and events.
Worry not though, i'll only work on this at work during the super calm hours when there's nothing to do at all (like early mornings, afternoons or weekends) so i'll still be investing time in my main projects.

I discovered this pretty neat online IDE for coding directly in the web browser.www.codebox.io

Could be neat to check out if you're interested in typing things and stuff..
...and things.