Sightings

“See? We even have an England room. Everything’s fine, just fine. AHAHAHA- Octo-squad, attack!”

Octomom managed to piss off the entire Internet, and California taxpayers even moreso, yesterday when TMZ ran photos from the inside of her house along with claims that she’s dropping $500 on haircuts while on welfare and won’t fix… More »

I was going to start this post with some sort of clever quip about how getting laid immediately fills a man with a certain bravado that 100% of the time leads to him making horrible fucking decisions. But then I remembered Axl Rose has been crazy for a really long time and already hinted he… More »

Last month, we saw a pregnant Jessica Simpsonposing nude for the April issue of Elle which apparently hit newsstands because here she is pimping the issue on Twitter while making the most ridiculous statement she’ll ever make in her life. And, yes, that’s counting the time she asked if the baby can see the… More »

After being arrested for spousal abuse over the weekend, That 70s Show actress Lisa Robin Kelly is now claiming she was set up by her male roommate who beat the shit out of himself just to get her arrested, so have I mentioned these people are drug addicts? These people are drug addicts. TMZ reports:… More »

Spike Lee being a fucking idiot aside, things were starting to turn around in the Trayvon Martin case. ABC News obtained footage that showed a clearly non-injured George Zimmerman despite conveniently leaked police reports claiming he was punched repeatedly and his skull bashed against the curb. From there, Rush Limbaugh decided to follow-up SlutGate by… More »

When Octomom fired 14 children out of her vagina, she just assume the TV money would come rolling in and she could simply pay an army of nannies to raise her uterus droppings army she only squeezed out to get all that TV money. Except Octomom failed to factor in America’s amazing capacity to not… More »

George Clooney was arrested in Washington, DC today for protesting outside the Sudanese embassy, except none of that’s even scandalous at all because he wanted to get arrested to bring exposure to his cause and was smiling the whole time. But what is important is that I’ve discovered George Clooney testifying to a senate hearing… More »

[Ed. Note: Quick bit of site news that none of you will read because why the hell would you ever stop looking at the top pic. (No, really, what are you doing down here?) I’m without a Photo Boy this week, yet as… More »

Here’s a pregnant Jessica Simpson posing nude (Full shot here.) for the April issue of Elle if posing nude means they de-jowled her head and slapped it on Demi Moore’s body because it was cheaper than airbrushing out nacho cheese burns. Regardless, Jessica confirms she’s having a girl, but more importantly reveals I was right… More »

Paula Deen and her brother Bubba Hiers (This story’s great already, I know.) are currently being sued for sexual harrasment by Lisa Jackson the former general manager of their jointly-owned restaurant Uncle Bubba’s Oyster House. Along with claims that Bubba openly watched… More »

Ralph McQuarrie, the legendary science-fiction concept artist who gave George Lucas’ original Star Wars trilogy its iconic, timeless look, died Saturday at 82. And for those of you who haven’t spent 98% of your life obsessed with Star Wars like I still am (Did you know they made McQuarrie concept figures?! I need to quit… More »

If this thing wasn’t going to be called “CrossStream,” we’re truly lost as a nation.

Just so a certain segment of The Superficial’s audience believes this, here’s a report from FOX Nation: The Network Jesus Would Watch that says Andrew Breitbart and Anthony Weiner, the Democratic congressman he brought down by accurately reporting… More »

In the immediate aftermath of his attack on Rihanna, Chris Brown’s mom Joyce Hawkins, herself a victim of domestic abuse, basically held his hand through the whole ordeal and told everyone how he’s such a good kid so go easy on him. Surprisingly, this turned Chris into an even bigger spoiled brat with a complete… More »

“If I drive for you, you get your money. You tell me where we start, where we’re going, where we’re going afterwards. I give you five minutes when we get there. Anything happens in that five minutes and I’m yours. No matter what. Anything a minute on either side of that and you’re on your… More »