Utah Reps. Rob Bishop and Jason Chaffetz unveiled a compromise plan last week to end all the fighting over public lands in the state. The compromise is this: The congressmen get to propose what they want, while environmentalists and the president get to promise none of it will become law.---Bishop said the plan brings “certainty” to people who use public lands in Utah. It does indeed. Judging by the reaction, we are now certain public lands issues never will be solved.---The Utah Legislature begins its annual session today. One of the big topics will be whether to legalize marijuana for medicinal purposes. Another is whether to completely outlaw smoking at the Salt Lake International Airport. Apparently, being sick of airport security and delayed flights does not qualify as a medical emergency.---Actually, if they pass a medical marijuana bill, lawmakers are likely to legalize only the consumption, and not the smoking, of the plant. Just beware if your teenager seems to be inhaling the brownies his friends made for him.---Sarah Palin officially endorsed Donald Trump last week. Democrats and a lot of Republicans hope she can do for Trump what she did for John McCain’s campaign in 2008.---Not long after Palin’s endorsement, Bob Dole also came out in favor of Trump, giving him a clear majority of his party’s unsuccessful former candidates.---Meanwhile, the only thing dropping faster than Hillary Clinton’s poll numbers is the Dow Jones Industrial average.---Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders give Democrats two clear choices. One apparently puts top-secret things on a personal email server; the other can’t remember how to turn on the computer.---Meanwhile, scientists are planning to readjust the “Doomsday Clock” at a press conference on Tuesday. The clock is set at three minutes to midnight, where scientists placed it last January. I have a clock similar to that at home. I can assure them theirs isn’t working.---Chances are, scientists are going to readjust the clock. It will now read three minutes to next November.

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Everyone likes to laugh. Some of us even like to groan occasionally. Well, you've come to the right place. "On second thought" is a weekly feature I produce for the Deseret News, available on Mondays. But here you can read them as I think of them. Oh yes, and if you've got something even funnier, post it in the comments. If I like it, I may use it.