Half a Century eBook

but this position was soon abandoned, and this passage
stamped as spurious. Every Christian church had
so stamped it, for all encouraged wives to join their
communion with or without the consent of their husbands.
Thousands of female martyrs had sealed their testimony
with their blood, opposing the authority of their
husbands, and had been honored by the church.
As for me, I must take that passage alone for my Bible,
or expunge it.

Then and there I cast it from me forever, as being
no part of divine law, and thus unconsciously took
the first step in breaking through a faith in plenary
inspiration.

I next turned to the book in general for guidance:
“Wives, obey your husbands;” “Children
obey your parents;” “Honor thy father and
thy mother.” What a labyrinth of irreconcilable
contradictions! God, in nature, spoke with no
uncertain sound, “Go home to your mother,”
and my choice was made while my husband talked.

I said that if he did not see about a boat I would.
When he told me that he had a legal right to detain
me, and would exercise it, I assured him the attempt
would be as dangerous as useless, for I was going to
Pittsburg.

He went out, promising to engage my passage, but staid
so long that I went to the wharf, where respectable
women were not seen alone, saw a boat with a flag
out for Pittsburg, engaged a berth, and so left Louisville.

CHAPTER XII.

THE VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF DEATH.—­AGE, 24, 25.

Mother was suffering when I reached her, as I had
not dreamed of. After a consultation, Drs. Gazzam
and Fahnestock thought she could not live more than
four weeks; but Spear said she might linger three months.
This blanched the cheek of each one. Three months
of such unremitting pain, steadily on the increase,
was appalling; but mother faced the prospect without
a murmur, willing to bear by God’s grace what
He should inflict, and to wait His good time for deliverance.
I was filled with self-reproach, for I should have
been with her months before.

In a few days my mother-in-law and one of her daughters
came to see how long I proposed to stay, why I had
left James with the goods, and when I would go and
take charge of them. They had had a letter from
him, and he was in great trouble. She was gentle
and grave—­inquired minutely about our nursing,
but thought it expensive—­dwelt at length
on the folly of spending time and money in caring
for the sick when recovery was impossible. Mother
could not see them, and they were offended, for they
proposed helping to take care of her, that I might
return to my duty.

Some time after the visit of my mother-in-law, her
son-in-law—­who was a class-leader and a
man of prominence in the community—­came
with solemn aspect, took my hand, sighed, and said:

“I heard you had left James with the goods.”
Here he sighed again, wagged his head, and added: