3 posts in this topic

Guest Kendra

My ex husband, whom I share two children with, just came to me confessing he has a deep emotional relationship with his first cousin. He hopes for there to be more in the future but is scared to tell his family.. To me, this seems a little odd but I passed no judgement. Only listened and told him that I supported him and his decisions whatever they may be. I'm just a little foggy on it and have one major question. This might seem a little ignorant, but hypothetically if my ex and his cousin end up getting married... I'm wondering if bullying will be an issue. For my kids and their kids?

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Bullying is an issue. But, kids pick on each other for any number of reasons, real or perceived. So long as the kids have the facts, they can be taught to let it go in one ear and out the other. If other kids make ignorant comments, and your children know the real facts, who does it belittle in their eyes? Not them, they know they are smarter on the subject. However, there is no real need for them to broadcast the fact either. While there is nothing for them to be ashamed about, there's no need to bring unwanted drama upon themselves either.

I would also like to say it is quite refreshing indeed to hear of an ex that is willing to give the benefit of the doubt on the matter, and be supportive. Almost always, the ex is threatening to go to court, have someone thrown in jail, take the kids away, prevent visitation, or at the very least scream a lot of nonsense. It sounds as if you two had a considerably more amicable split than I did.....LOL And mine wasn't over my cousin, :cheesy:

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we lived in a small town when we got married. my daughters had just turned 11 and 13. we'd made sure they were well informed, so when the inevitable bullying started, it was short lived.

my youngest one ignored it. it all just rolled right off her back. my oldest one took it upon herself to enlighten her bullies with the facts. let me tell ya, NOTHING will stop bullying faster than turning the tables on your attackers and making them feel ignorant.