exploring my sexuality, and other adventures

airplane selfie

So Wolf is getting settled in his new job in the other city (the other place, but not The Other Place, if you see what I mean). And I’m getting settled into my new solo routine at home. I have to get used to being on my own again (including cooking for myself, which I find difficult and stressful), at least for a few months, but there are significant differences this time. For one, Wolf now has a cell phone so it’s easier to be in touch from a distance, whether that’s by phone or text. We’re also in the same time zone so our cycles still mesh. And the distance, while inconvenient, is near enough for a weekly commute.

Except that we only have one car and the public transportation situation here is dire. But my mom will be away for an extended period — almost the exact same length as an academic term, as luck would have it — and she has offered to lend us her car, which will simplify things immensely.

But for now I’m now communicating with both Wolf and Jaime largely by text, which gives me a stronger sense of my menfolk; I’m more conscious of maintaining two relationships now that I’m alone in this house and they each have a specific text sound and call schedule.

From the last leg of my trip home from Europe in April. En route from Jaime to Wolf.

Boobday is a body-positive meme where women share images of their bodies in order to show that there is beauty in all of us. With confidence comes power and with power comes confidence.

I think I might be coming out of my not-posting-much phase. Hy is doing a challenge to write Every Damn Day in June, and while I was never posting daily, I think trying to find 10 or 15 minutes a day to just post something may be the kind of kick-start I need. It should help cut down on overthinking, for one thing.

I have to try to get caught up on mile high photos; I’ve got a cache, a stash, a bloody trove of them. And another little trip is coming up next week. This photo is from my trip to Playground Conference 2018, back in February.

Hello all! I just got home the other day from a lengthy trip to visit Jaime. It was wonderful to spend time with him again after so long apart, but I’m now getting re-accustomed to my regular routine. And time zone. And hemisphere.

If anyone asks about my trip, I can tell them that the weather was good but it was rather disorienting to go to a country where the sun is too high and on the wrong side of the sky, and that it took even longer to get used to because half the days were cloudy. It’s been disorienting coming home too, with snow on the ground and what feels like 5:30 pm sunshine at 1:30.

But I won’t tell them how it’s both comforting and bittersweet to go from the care of one man I love to that of the other, in either direction. Or how, even though there’s been a net increase of love, I regret the fact that the competition for my time is a zero-sum game and I must always disappoint one of them.