Wash Me!

Once again! Vandals!

There it was again!

If you have ever returned to your car or truck only to find that message "Wash Me!" scratched from the road dust on your vehicle's back window, you may know why that irks me.

It does.

It doesn't take much accumulation of the road dust to occasion such a message, and it became so frequently added when our car was in the driveway, that I determined to find out who the guilty culprit was.

My "detective spirit" just got the best of me. I installed a security camera to surveill our car.

The fingered messages stopped!

That was good, as far as it went, but it didn't stop the "Wash Me!" messages.

It had to be a gang of frustrated finger painters.

I would come out of our field office sometimes for lunch with my wife, or at the end of the day, and there it was waiting to greet me: "Wash Me!"

All that continued until one day when my wife and I drove to our post office where the small staff usually meant a long wait in line.

I told Margie she could wait in the car or come in with me.

She opted to avoid standing in line.

Surprisingly there was no line inside, and I was in and out in the shortest time ever.

To my surprise, Margie was behind our car, and wiping off two dirty fingers.

10 comments

Demas, LOL. I have a vision of you silently driving home and when you get there, you made sure you were out of the car first and get the hose and turn the water on like you are going to wash the car, then turn the water and spray Margie, at least her dirty fingers, lol.

Blessings my friend.

Perspycacious 6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond Author

Dear Shyron,

Somehow my short stories are real enough by being said in the first person, that they are considered to surely be true stories.

Alas, or hooray, that is not the case here, nor in several of the others I have posted here on HubPages.

I'm glad this one gave you a chuckle, and perhaps you will want to reexamine some of the others to see what made them seem so "first hand."

Are you ready for June, summer. and the heat? Perspycacious

MizBejabbers 6 months ago

That is so funny. My sister lived in an apartment complex, and she was laughing one day because one of the tenants did that to her. She threatened to do it to my car, too.

Perspycacious 6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond Author

MizBejabbers - Turn about is fair play alright! My thought: cars rust out faster when they get rinsed off every time the wind blows. Try that one on your sister and see how that goes over.

BlossomSB 6 months ago from Victoria, Australia

Good one! I love to have a chuckle!

Perspycacious 6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond Author

BlossomSB - I surely meant that short story to give readers a chuckle. Most of my limericks were written with that same intent. I'm glad you had the chuckle.

FlourishAnyway 6 months ago from USA

Your wife has a great sense of humor. And she's sneaky!

Perspycacious 6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond Author

FlourishAnyway - The best wives have a sense of humor, are likely intelligent in things that count to their husbands, and yes they can be sneaky, too.

As I mentioned to ShyronShenko (above) this is not a true story about a personal experience of mine. It is a created short story.

Gypsy Rose Lee 6 months ago from Riga, Latvia

That was a good one. I do believe your wife would like you to to wash the car after every trip. Perhaps the two of you could create some fun like a suds and water party where you and the car get a really got dousing of water.

Perspycacious 6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond Author

Gypsy Rose Lee - If that was "suds" in terms of your favorite Latvian or Brooklyn beer, I opt out, but a good water fight is always welcome, especially in the middle of the garden where it can do the most good!

Thanks for today's visit and comments/suggestions.

P. S. Margie and the story are pure fiction, as I pointed out above. The latest fiction was about a school janitor named Jinx.