June 27, 2012

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Male Voice: (whispers) Exclusive.
Lauryn Kahn: Hi-hi-hi-hi!
Eliza Coupe: Hi-hi-hi-hi!
Lauryn Kahn: Oh my God.
(interposing voices)
Lauryn Kahn: How are you?
You look amazing.
Lauryn Kahn: Are you serious right now?
Lauryn Kahn: I just noticed something.
Same bag alert.
Lauryn Kahn: Same bag alert.
Twinnies!
Lauryn Kahn: How hilarious is this?
Eliza Coupe: That is so funny.
Lauryn Kahn: So funny.
So funny.
Eliza Coupe: It's like a sitcom
or something.
Lauryn Kahn: I just realized this,
you probably just saw it
Lauryn Kahn: on my Instagram feed,
and then...
Eliza Coupe: You know, I don't
follow you on Instagram.
Eliza Coupe: So...yeah.
Lauryn Kahn: Oh. Okay.
Weird. You don't.
Eliza Coupe: Yeah. No, I don't.
Lauryn Kahn: Who cares.
Who cares.
Eliza Coupe: Who cares.
So we have the same bag.
Lauryn Kahn: And I love it.
And I love that we're twins.
Lauryn Kahn: It's amazing, and I love
it, and it's amazing.
Lauryn Kahn: Who cares.
Eliza Coupe: You know what? You
copy me, and that is so flattering.
Lauryn Kahn: Who cares.
Eliza Coupe: Yeah, but now I can't remember
did you say
Eliza Coupe: that you have to go to
a nightclub after this.
Eliza Coupe: You going out?
You going to...or is it a wedding?
Lauryn Kahn: Why are you saying that?
Eliza Coupe: It's just that your
makeup's really heavy.
Eliza Coupe: It looks really good--
Lauryn Kahn: Thank you.
Eliza Coupe: --really good, but it's
really heavy.
Lauryn Kahn: I like to put
a little effort in. You know?
Eliza Coupe: So you gotta find what
works for you.
Lauryn Kahn: Exactly.
It's about feeling good.
Lauryn Kahn: And honestly, I think one of the
reasons that I've been
Lauryn Kahn: feeling so good is I've
done the most amazing
Lauryn Kahn: cleanse recently.
I highly recommend.
Lauryn Kahn: I don't know if you'll be
able to find it though.
Eliza Coupe: That is so good.
You know, I actually just finished
Eliza Coupe: a cleanse too.
Lauryn Kahn: Ooh.
Eliza Coupe: Mines a little bit
newer, a little less dated.
Eliza Coupe: It's called the Fresher
than Fresh, Fresh as Clean,
Eliza Coupe: Clean, Clean,
Fresh, Fresh Cleanse.
Lauryn Kahn: That's really a long name.
Eliza Coupe: It's really long name,
because it's a really
Eliza Coupe: long cleanse.
You do it for a year.
Lauryn Kahn: I actually think
I read about your cleanse
Lauryn Kahn: on Jezebel.
Wasn't it like a hoax,
Lauryn Kahn: people were like getting
really sick from it?
Eliza Coupe: No. That is incorrect.
Eliza Coupe: Like my body feels
so good--
Lauryn Kahn: Totally.
Eliza Coupe: --that I really need
only 4 hours of sleep.
Lauryn Kahn: You're doing the
whole sleeping at night thing though?
Lauryn Kahn: It's so...I just do two
quick 15 minute naps a
Lauryn Kahn: day, and I'm ready
to go.
Eliza Coupe: That was like a 30 minute
situation.
Eliza Coupe: Hey! Thank you
so much.
Eliza Coupe: What is your
name again?
Thome Coupe: Thome.
Lauryn: Thome.
Thome: Yeah.
Lauryn Kahn: Oh my God.
That is some name.
Lauryn Kahn: It's like strong.
And I love your glasses too.
Lauryn Kahn: It's so like that Weezer video, that Weezer guy,
Lauryn Kahn: Buddy Holly.
And it's just like retro, and hip.
Thome Coupe: Are you guys ready
to order?
Eliza Coupe: I think we need a little
more time with the
Eliza Coupe: table tent.
Thome Coupe: Sure. Have at it.
I'll be right back.
Lauryn Kahn: Thank you.
Lauryn Kahn: Did you just like see that?
It was like,
Lauryn Kahn: sparks, sparks, sparks,
electricity.
Lauryn Kahn: I don't know. It was
like the beginning of a
Lauryn Kahn: romantic movie or
something.
Lauryn Kahn: Did you feel that?
Eliza Coupe: No. Not at all.
Like a rom-com?
Lauryn Kahn: I don't know. Maybe.
Maybe it ends up being funny,
Lauryn Kahn: but in the end we end up
together. I don't know.
Eliza Coupe: It's funny that you
even say that, because
Eliza Coupe: I was at a SoulCycle class
with Kyra Sedgwick,
Eliza Coupe: and she's just so fit.
So inspirational.
Lauryn Kahn: I do sort of the newer
version of that.
Lauryn Kahn: It's called SpiritCycle.
It's like SoulCycle, but
Lauryn Kahn: it's newer, and it's
better, and it just
Lauryn Kahn: takes it to a whole
nother level.
Eliza Coupe: Like I'm all about my
core. Like if it involves
Eliza Coupe: the core, like my tree trunk,
like, I sign right up.
Lauryn Kahn: It's my number
one priority.
Eliza Coupe: That's you?
Lauryn Kahn: That is me.
Eliza Coupe: Your number one priority.
Good for you.
Eliza Coupe: You just start working
on your core? You just like...
Lauryn Kahn: No-no-no. I've been
working on it for a while.
Thome Coupe: Ready to order.
Lauryn Kahn: Do you have any
recommendations?
Thome Coupe: No. I do. Yeah, the bacon
cheeseburger with smoked gouda
Thome Coupe: is really good.
Lauryn Kahn: You like it?
Thome Coupe: It's my favorite.
Lauryn Kahn: Uh. Oh my God.
I feel like are you in my brain
Lauryn Kahn: with me right now?
Thome Coupe: I am not at all.
Lauryn Kahn: No. That's not possible, but um, yes,
Lauryn Kahn: I want that, and that's it.
And I can't wait to eat it.
Thome Coupe: Okay so. Alright.
Sounds good.
Lauryn Kahn: I am so rude.
I am getting a text right now.
Lauryn Kahn: It is you.
Why are you texting me?
Eliza Coupe: I'm texting you purposely,
because a joke.
Lauryn Kahn: Oh my God.
This is a funny joke.
Eliza Coupe: A joke.
Right now.
Lauryn Kahn: Lauryn is such a cunty
skank. She is like a
Lauryn Kahn: walking, talking pile
of STD garbage.
Eliza Coupe: Yeah.
Lauryn Kahn: Hilarious. It's almost
like it's not meant for me at all.
Eliza Coupe: I know! That's what I did.
I did a really
Eliza Coupe: hurtful text in a character
of someone if
Eliza Coupe: they didn't like you.
It would be so funny.
Lauryn Kahn: Oh my God. You are like
a comic, like waiting
Lauryn Kahn: to bust out.
Eliza Coupe: Cunt.
(they both giggle)
Lauryn Kahn: Whore.
Lauryn Kahn: Lauryn: I hate you so much.
I hate you so much.
Lauryn Kahn: Lauryn: Wish you were dead.
Eliza Coupe: Eliza: I hope you get
run over when you
Eliza Coupe: Eliza: go out to your car.