Raspy-Throated Movie Preview Announcer: "They said she had a face that launched a thousand ships. They killed the man she really loved and sent her back to her brutal husband. Now, she isn't just mad, she wants to get even, and she's got a little help from some friends: a posse of mythological women who have gotten the shaft!"

"Featuring: Helen of Troy! Cassandra! Medusa! Pandora! Arachne!"

"This summer, Tartarus hath no fury like a Greek woman treated like crap!"