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Former Late Show host David Letterman has seven Emmys, was recently honored by the Peabody Awards, is a recipient of the Kennedy Center Honors, and the auto racing team in which he is a co-owner has an Indianapolis 500 win under its belt, er, hood, taking the title in 2004.

But all of that will mean nothing to the Indiana native if his team — Rahal Letterman Lanigan Racing (RLLR) — doesn’t win this year’s milestone race, taking place Sunday.

“Personally, if — and you can count on this, I don’t know, put this away and run it later — if we don’t win the hundredth running, I have every intention of faking my own death,” he told ESPN’s SportsCenter Saturday to laughs from the crowd surrounding the outdoor stage at the Indy Motor Speedway where he was being interviewed. When pressed on how he’d pull it off, he revealed, in classic Letterman deadpan humor, “I know a fella who would remove my fingerprints. I have a post office box somewhere on the planet. And that’s all I can tell ya.”

He also jokes — or maybe not? — that he’s drunk. So take those claims with a grain of salt.

Watch the video below to see the exchange, and hear why he thinks his team’s Graham Rahal, son of past Indy 500 winner and RLLR co-owner Bobby Rahal, has a good shot at crossing the finish line first at the annual auto racing event.