Those are just a few of the reactions people get when they talk about mental health.

Unsolicited advice is always well meaning, but it all too often misses the mark. It’s often reductive or dismissive, minimising people’s very serious experience of mental illness, or puts the blame on the individual rather than a condition that’s out of their control.

Sonaksha Iyengar, the artist who previously created an illustrated alphabet of mental health, is fed up of the rubbish advice people dish out to those struggling.

She’s created a series of illustrations, called Public Prescription, capturing some of the most common responses people receive when they talk about their mental illness.

Just not worrying isn’t that easy (Picture: Sonaksha Iyengar)

‘Heaps of unsolicited advice are often thrown at people living with a mental illness or anyone openly speaking about their mental health,’ Sonaksha tells Metro.co.uk. ‘As if the debilitating pain isn’t enough, these comments can be extremely hurtful and detrimental.

Advertisement

Advertisement

‘The series intends to address these ill-advised comments that often come from a place of ignorance, using a combination of typography and illustrations.

‘It’s important to remember that belittling someone’s pain or struggle is extremely dangerous and the series hopes to create awareness about this.’

Sonaksha, who has anxiety and depression, has experienced the negative impact of mental health related advice firsthand, saying that comments from others added to her already existing guilt for being ill.

‘It lead to spiraling thoughts of hating myself, feeling like I’m an ungrateful person, feeling like I’m not enough or not even trying to be better,’ she explains. ‘Especially since living with a mental illness can make one feel so alone.

Just because other people have things worse doesn’t mean you aren’t deserving of help (Picture: Sonaksha Iyengar)

‘As I began finding other people who had heard similar things, we spoke about it and how these comments/advice diminished our experience and it just felt like a collective catharsis.

So apart from the awareness, I also hope people who are on the receiving end of such unsolicited advice find some sort of comfort knowing that they are not alone.

‘Of course, I also hope that people who are doling out such advice take a moment to evaluate and understand why it is so dangerous.’

The most annoying bit of ‘advice’ Sonaksha receives about her mental health is one that’ll be familiar to loads of people – the idea that other people have it worse, so we shouldn’t complain.

Advertisement

Advertisement

‘There seems to be this constant need to compare pain and put it on a scale,’ Sonaksha says. ‘We’ve been geared to constantly compete and that seems to be spilling over.

Mental illness can hit anyone (Picture: Sonaksha Iyengar)

‘Also, sometimes mental illnesses might not manifest with physical symptoms and people automatically assume that just because they can’t ‘see’ it, it doesn’t exist. But that’s so untrue. Just because it’s invisible, doesn’t mean it’s unreal.’

Sonaksha advises that rather than trying to problem solve when someone talks about their mental illness, the best thing to do is listen.

‘I think it’s important to approach it from a place of kindness and empathy,’ she explains. ‘Right now I feel like most people approach mental health from a place of judgement.

‘It’s essential to believe people living with mental illnesses and give them the space to feel whatever they are feeling without being judged. Often they just want to be heard, so it’s okay to not always have a response.

‘Lend an honest listening ear and don’t dole out advice that they haven’t asked for.

‘Say things you mean – say you’re there and willing to listen only if you are, not just as a formality.’

And for anyone wondering what they should say, remain calm – Sonaksha’s next series of illustrations will tackle just that.