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Sunday, April 18, 2010

Break the Negative Self-Talk Habit is the name of Dr. Judith Tingley's presentation on Wednesday, April 21, 12 noon at the Commons on Bainbridge Island. The Commons is a part of the Senior Center, across the street from Waterfront Park.

Even though there's a "negative" in the title, the talk will be upbeat, informative, and entertaining!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

I posted the article below, originally in Seattle Woman, July/August 2009, because it's such a great example of an amazing woman, who clearly announces she's no role model for a balanced life, and shows us equally as clearly that she too is plagued with the negative self-talk that most of us deal with. You'll see a great example in the second to the last paragraph which highlights the negative self-talk in blue. In the final paragraph, some neutral, cognitive restructured self-talk is highlighted in red.

Carol Cassella, M.D., anesthesiologist, author of Oxygen, spouse, and mother of two sets of twins, ages 12 and 13, seems to personify the 21st century ideal of the woman who does it all, has it all, and is it all, balancing her many roles with grace. She disputes the suggestion that she’s a role model and says, “It’s not true. There is no balance: like being on a bongo board, there’s never a static point. I’m always adjusting, seeking equilibrium — which isn’t there. The last year has been the most stressful of my life.”

WELCOME TO IWO!

It's the beginning of the third year of intelligentwomenonly.com I've started off with some retrospective posts as a reminder to me and you that this blog started out focused on understanding and eliminating negative self-talk. Not surprising since my current book project is Handbook #l for Intelligent Women: Break the Negative Self-Talk Habit.Strong beliefs underlie intelligentwomenonly.com posts:• Research based advice/suggestions/content contain more accurate facts and greater value than pop psychology.• Intelligent girls and women are more likely than intelligent boys and men to limit themselves because of their self-talk.• Negative self-talk is a bad habit, not a neurosis or psychosis. Unfortunately, it's normal in a majority of girls and women.

•The negative self-talk habit has to be eliminated before realistic (or positive thinking) can be learned and maintained.• Positive self-talk cannot create a positive reality even if the negative self-talk habit is broken.• Self-help approaches can work for changing thinking, feeling, and behavioral habits.In the next nine months of 2012, I would love to be able to tell you that the book will be published this year or next. In the meantime I've become intrigued with new brain research about thinking and emotions, particularly applicable and useful for and to women. I'll post no more about gender differences, unless they're wildly interesting, and more about intelligent women's psychology, thinking, feelings, and out front actions. I've added a new red subject box, Writers and Writing, targeted specifically for writers, of course!

I'm still looking for some controversy, disagreement, new information from readers. I'm open to your thoughts about what you'd like to hear more about — or less about!Please send me your comments, suggestions, questions, criticisms — all of you intelligent women out there!