We want to make your experience easy and help you quickly find information that matters to you. By using our site, we assume that you consent to our use of these cookies. To learn more about our cookies, including how to opt out, please review our privacy policy.

wyoo Judging People

Are you a judgemental person?
I am not a judgemental person but if someone asks my advise on something and does their own thing anyway I get pretty judgey, an example would be early weaning. I was asked advise on this gave all the information I had and all the dangers of it and the next day a photo was put on Facebook of a 6 week old eating baby cereal!

I can come across as judgemental at times but I'm really just stating my strong opinion on something that I have experienced.

It is very hard for some to put their own agendas aside. Along side judging goes stereotyping, the thing is we could all have similar experiences to one another, yet we don't all view things in the same way. We forget that people are individuals and you cant go judging someone just on one thing that they say or do.

but if someone asks my advise on something and does their own thing anyway I get pretty judgey,

Unless you are an expert on a subject, I am unsure why someone not following your advice makes you more judgemental.

I do judge. I think we all do, because we have our own ideas, morals, way of doing things etc - and if we didn't think it was the best way then we wouldn't be doing it that way (generally).

However, I am also very aware that my way really only works for me (and quite often doesn't) - so whilst I might have a natural reaction to judge, I have a counter reaction to remind myself that I have NO idea of their circumstances.

One thing that really annoys me is listening to a group of mothers judge someone else's child raising skills or choices, especially if that person is not there (i.e. gossip). Everyone makes a choice based on their own situation and their own ability to deal with things. What gives us a right to judge that?

I think judging is an instinctual thing, dating back to the days when we had to suss out a situation for fight or flight. I judge all the time. The difference is whether you act on that judgement. I rarely do, and frequently end up eating the words of my inner monologue when am proved totally wrong about someone. Fortunately as I tend to keep my judgements to myself it is only I who have to experience my humiliation at being massively wrong 👍

That's so true, I don't know the circumstances and I never spoke out about the baby being weaned early although I had a whole speech in my head as to what I would say if the person brought it up with me again, she didn't so nobody except you lot know that I judged her.
It's only when topic of conversations are brought up I would vocalise things, I'd never turn around to my best friend and vocalise it.
I also don't talk to other mothers about different styles of parenting. My close group of friends has one anti vaxer, one who smokes during pregnancy, and one who smacks.

None of these affect me or my child and couldn't care less what they do. It's the weaning one that bugged me (you don't need to be an expert to know why it's dangerous to give food to a 6 week old that can't hold its head up) and other things like I judge drug addicts because I have experience with drug addicts and won't tolerate them now, but people would call me cruel for judging people when I don't know they're story.

I think its natural to judge things and compare to our standard and I'm sure most people are guilty of it.

I judge people if I'm honest but it's usually something that i feel really strongly about. I once asked a woman in Claire accessories if putting a hole in her seven week old baby's ear would make her love her baby any more! This was a few years ago now and looking back I can't belive I said it!!!!

You are passing a message to a BabyCentre staff member.
For the fastest help on community guidelines violations, please click 'Report this' on the item you wish the staff to review.
For general help please read our Help section or contact us.