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Bills such as Thomson's come from a variety of sources. The tartan idea was presented by the Los Angeles Caledonia Club, which thought Thomson's Scottish heritage made her the ideal author.

Assemblywoman Fran Pavley, D-Agoura Hills, who is carrying the poet laureate bill, was approached by Sacramento writers seeking a replacement for the last poet laureate, who served from 1966 until he died two years ago.

FROM SENSIBLE TO SPURIOUS

Sometimes seemingly silly bills stem from a unique constituent need.

A measure in 1987 allowing naked people to serve alcohol was carried by then-Assemblyman Jerry Eaves, D-Rialto, because a nudist colony in Riverside County ran afoul of state law requiring booze servers to be clothed.

Other bills are pure satire.

In 1994, then-Assemblyman John Burton, D-San Francisco, lampooned the congressional Republicans' Contract With America by introducing a bill to make it a crime to "intentionally and maliciously" be poor.

A companion bill would have created a statewide network of orphanages serving gruel.

The most common variety of innocuous bill that gets passed and signed into law is, like the tartan proposal, one designating an official state something or other.

Gold may be the official mineral, but there's also an official rock -- serpentine. San Joaquin soil is the official dirt.

A BILL WITH BITE

Former Sen. Ralph Dills, D-Gardena, successfully carried the bill to make the saber-toothed cat California's official fossil. His Senate colleagues joked that Dills, the oldest member of the upper house, was honoring himself.

There's an official state theater -- the Pasadena Community Playhouse. And who can forget the state's official fife and drum corps -- the California Consolidated Drum Band?

Also in the musical vein, let's not forget the official state dance, West Coast Swing, which Sen. Quentin Kopp pushed through the Legislature in 1988 at the request of the U.S. Swing Dance Council.

It was a good year for such legislation. Also in 1988, then-Assemblyman Byron Sher, D-Palo Alto, carried a bill suggested by some Redwood City Campfire Girls to make the banana slug the official state mollusk.

Sher, now a state senator, may have carried some of the most significant environmental legislation of the past 20 years, but he got more publicity for the slug bill than any other.

TARTAN TOUTING

Many of these bills, however, have been signed into law. So an official tartan -- one modeled on the one used by John Muir's family -- may become part of our state inventory.

"The tartan's blue reflects the sky, the ocean and the state's rivers and lakes, while the green stands for the state's mountains, fields and parks," reads the bill. "The red, gold and blue seams signify the arts, sciences, agriculture and industry of California."

The bill also contains explicit instructions for creating the tartan.

"The threads begin with 8 threads of yellow, followed by 2 threads of black,

20 threads of green, 4 threads of scarlet," and so on.

"It's very beautiful, actually," Thomson said.

Thomson defends her bill as simply a way to recognize the contributions of Californians of Scots-Irish descent.

"We have Caesar Chavez Day. We have Martin Luther King Day. We're not asking for a day, we're asking for a tartan," Thomson said. "No one has to buy one or even wear one unless they want to."

POETIC SPOKESPERSON

Under the poet laureate bill, the governor would pick someone from a list of three nominees put forth by the California Arts Council.

The poet laureate would have to be a "prominent" poet "with a significant amount of published work" who has lived in California at least 10 years.

The state could give the poet laureate a stipend. And here in term-limits country, no laureate could hold the post for more than two terms of two years each.

There are responsibilities, however. The poet laureate would have to give at least six public readings each term and undertake one specific project dedicated to making poetry more accessible to Californians.

"Especially in light of the energy crisis, we should appreciate the wonderful things about California and the talented people who live here," said Pavley, was a middle-school teacher for 28 years before coming to the Legislature.

Pavley's bill, which has won bipartisan support, is scheduled for a vote on the Assembly floor tomorrow.

"There's nothing silly about this," Campbell said. "Poetry and art is part of what enriches human experience. Our state, its history, its future are made richer through verse and art."

A legacy of offbeat bills

The Legislature has a rich history of bills that aren't exactly desperately needed public policy reforms. Here's a look at a few:

1961 -- Assemblyman Nick Petris, D-Oakland, asks the state to build the Monument to the Spirit of Freedom and the Pioneers of the United States and the State of California. The monument would include a dome in the form of the Liberty Bell topped by an 800-foot tower, and statues of four American eagles outlined in neon lights. It was never built.

1961 -- Assemblyman Jerome Waldie, D-Antioch, introduces a bill allowing the killing of frogs with slingshots. The bill initiates a 12-year correspondence between Waldie -- the "Mad Butcher of the Swamps" -- and the late Chronicle columnist Art Hoppe, disguising himself as Nestle J. Frobish of the Fair Play for Frogs Committee. The letters were published as a book in 1977, "Fair Play for Frogs."

1980 -- Sen. Marz Garcia, R-San Mateo, introduces a bill making it a misdemeanor to kill a dog or cat and then eat it.

1982 -- Sen. Ken Maddy, R-Fresno, introduces a bill in which all the contents have been deleted. "This bill would make no change in the law," the summary reads.

1994 -- Assemblyman Jan Goldsmith, R-Poway, introduces a bill to allow Californians to own ferrets as pets. Speaker Willie Brown declares the bill as "dead as that ferret on Goldsmith's head," referring to what Brown believes is a toupee.

2000 -- Assemblyman George House, R-Hughson, introduces a bill to make the almond California's state nut. Democratic detractors say House, with his penchant for loopy floor speeches, would be a better candidate for the title. Fearing almond growers would get an unfair marketing advantage, other nut growers and legislators quash the bill.