Obey Gammons

Listen up, bizzitches. We’ve got Red Sox baseball on TV this afternoon! Tune into NESN or log onto your laptop or get your ass down to the local at 1:00pm to witness the grapefruit glory that is Boston vs. Pittsburgh. Sure, you won’t recognize half the people you see, and Al Nipper will likely be pitching the seventh and eighth, but this is the Red Sox. On television. Like, for the first time since that long walk off the Fenway grass last October. Open your eyes, jerky, and support the boys. Don’t make me come over to your house with a crate of beat down. Because I’ve got a s–tload of it. Stacked up real nice. Over there. See? In the corner? Behind the armoire? That’s my supply.