As everyone knows, today is one of the biggest religious holidays of the year. L. Ron Hubbard’s Dianetics: The Modern Science of Mental Health came out May 9, 1950. Ever since then, it’s been one of the most widely-celebrated holidays for the Church of Scientology – right up there with Integrity Day, Celebrity Day, Criminon Day, Maiden Voyage Anniversary and others that we swear 100 percent we are not making up. In honor of this special day, we’ve put together an itinerary we think the famous faces of Scientology would approve. Let us be your master of ceremonies!

Tom Cruise is no stranger to getting down to his skivvies and dancing around on the big screen (see Risky Business), so we think he would be on board for a showing of Magic Mike at Red River Theatres. Channing Tatum took home an Academy Award for Outstanding Achievement in Abdominals for this 2012 flick about the world of male strippers. It’s the best movie Matthew McConaughey was in last year in which he did not use a chicken drumstick as a surrogate body part. The movie is at 7 p.m. For tickets and more information, visit redrivertheatres.org.

Looking for two turntables and a microphone? We beckon you to the Capitol Center’s Spotlight Cafe tonight for at triumvirate of musical acts. Tim Kile (formerly of Arcade Fire) headlines, supported by the Brooks Young Band and Concord’s own jam-rockers Boogie On Alice. That’s where it’s at! The show starts at 7:30 p.m. For tickets and more information, visit ccanh.com.

Scientologist Ethan Suplee played Elwood in Without A Paddle, so naturally we think he’d dig tonight’s river-themed presentation at the McLane Audubon Center (84 Silk Farm Road). Photographer, filmmaker and writer Peter McBride presents The Colorado River: Flowing Through Conflict tonight at 7. This multimedia presentation tells the tale of McBride’s efforts to document the length of the Colorado River from end to end. The event is free. For more information, visit nhaudubon.org.