If this is your first visit, be sure to
check out the FAQ by clicking the
link above. You may have to register
before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages,
select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Barriers of a Broken Soul [PG-13]

This is completely original, and not based on any form of media. The rating is PG-13, mostly for exploration of mature themes such as perfection, suicide, getting over traumas, and deeper philosophical things which come up later. There is minor swearing, and some subject matter may prove disturbing.

PART I: CONCEPTION

Chapter 1

I give up.

I can't do this anymore.

This is the end.

There's nothing left for me to do.

I am broken, defeated, ruined.

The barriers of my soul have been compromised.

I have lost a vital part of my self.

I am no longer me.

Who is me?

Who am I?

I don't know anymore.

I don't know anything anymore.

Holden.

Eris.

Sarah.

I'm so sorry.

-----

"Where am I?"

He sat up and looked around, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea passed through him.

Swallowing it, he looked around. He saw whitewashed walls, a tray, a small TV in the corner. Two doors were set in the walls. And there, a brown-haired girl sitting down, her face displaying worry, staring at her feet.

"Eris? What happened? What's going on?"

"Kevin! Ohmigod! You're awake!"

She jumped up and hugged him tightly, causing another wave of nausea to pass through him.

"Eris...what's going on?"

The look of worry returned to her face as she sat back down.

"You're in the hospital. They thought you might not make it. You lost a lot of blood."

"I lost...what?"

"Blood. A lot of it." She gazed at him with a mixture of sadness and puzzlement. "You don't remember?"

He looked down, struggling to remember. What happened last night?

Just then, the door burst open, and an angry-looking guy stormed in. "Kevin! I can't believe you would do this! You promised me! You promised all of us!"

"Holden!? What are you doing here!?" Kevin sat back up in surprise, again triggering the nausea that had been plaguing him.

Holden grabbed Kevin firmly by the shoulders and shook him hard.
"what do you mean what am I doing here!? That's something I should be asking you!"

Brief... too brief according to the forum rules I think; It wouln't hurt to check them just to be sure.

It was the title what dragged me into this story. Now, I'll point out some mistakes i found. I'm no grammar geniousm but it should help though

"Kevin! Ohmigod! You're awake!"

Spaces between Oh, my and god.

He looked down, struggling to remember. What happened last night?

It would be: He looked down, struggling to remember. What happened last night? to outline the character's though from the rest of the text (also, you can use these ->"")

I also noticed that you separated the text too much, like here:

"Where am I?"

He sat up and looked around, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea passed through him.

Swallowing it, he looked around. He saw whitewashed walls, a tray, a small TV in the corner. Two doors were set in the walls. And there, a brown-haired girl sitting down, her face displaying worry, staring at her feet.

All of that can fit nicely into one paragraph, using periods so often interrupts the flow of the text; so it would be kinda like this:

"Where am I?" he sat up and looked around, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea passed through him. Swallowing it, he looked around and saw whitewashed walls, a tray, a small TV in the corner. Two doors were set in the walls. And there, a brown-haired girl sitting down, her face displaying worry, staring at her feet.

As i said, I'm no grammar genious, but as far as my knowledge goes, that's all I can tell; apart from the usual typing error, so be sure to proofread your work.

Also, you could use some extra description over there, I mean, Holden is only described as an angry looking guy, and I'm sure he's more than just an angry looking guy. Description estimulates the reader's imagination and keeps him interested. I reccomend you work on description on further chapters

The plot you handle is interesting, your main character's suicide attempt should keep me reading this for a while.

Uh, sorry. I hate to nitpick another reviewer's review, but I need to clarify some things for both you and the author.

Originally Posted by RoflLuxRay

Originally Posted by Butterfly

"Kevin! Ohmigod! You're awake!"

Spaces between Oh, my and god.

"Ohmigod" is fine. It's the phonetic typing that indicates how something is said besides the speech tag. In this case, she slurred it together. (Same goes with words like nowadays, even though that's correct and "now and days" is actually wrong.) We tend to be more lax with spelling in dialogue because it illustrates HOW something is being said, even if it's grammatically incorrect.

Originally Posted by RoflLuxRay

Originally Posted by Butterfly

He looked down, struggling to remember. What happened last night?

It would be: He looked down, struggling to remember. What happened last night? to outline the character's though from the rest of the text (also, you can use these ->"")

Omitting "thought tags" is actually a well-known form of narrative called free indirect discourse. The way it's written now is fine. Likewise, you don't have to have italics to separate narrative from thought; some people think it makes it hard to read without italics; I think it makes the flow smoother and more personal without them. It's a personal choice than a rule written in stone in fan fiction. Likewise, if you read professional work, you might notice that very little people, if any, use italics to separate thought from narrative. But like I said, we're a little more flexible with this stuff.

Originally Posted by RoflLuxRay

Originally Posted by Butterfly

"Where am I?"

He sat up and looked around, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea passed through him.

Swallowing it, he looked around. He saw whitewashed walls, a tray, a small TV in the corner. Two doors were set in the walls. And there, a brown-haired girl sitting down, her face displaying worry, staring at her feet.

All of that can fit nicely into one paragraph, using periods so often interrupts the flow of the text; so it would be kinda like this:

"Where am I?" he sat up and looked around, and immediately regretted it as a wave of nausea passed through him. Swallowing it, he looked around and saw whitewashed walls, a tray, a small TV in the corner. Two doors were set in the walls. And there, a brown-haired girl sitting down, her face displaying worry, staring at her feet.

While I agree with you that Butterfly can combine a lot of his shorter paragraphs, make sure your examples aren't improperly capitalized. "He" in "He sat up" should be capitalized because it's a new sentence.

Again, sorry, but I don't want false information to be passed on and taken as stone when most of these rules are quite flexible.

By the way, if this is original fiction, this goes in non-pokemon fan fics.

"what do you mean what am I doing here!? That's something I should be asking you!"
[...]

"well...maybe you should look at your arms. You'll probably remember then." She motioned toward his arms, which had been hidden under his bedsheet.

[...]

"oh....I remember now."

Capitalize both "what" and "well" and "oh" here. From what I skimmed (and I apologize to you for not taking the time to read this, but I am in between classes and am late for one class as I type right now, haha), you seem to have a good handle on grammar.

It's intriguing, certainly, but I felt like you were going into repetitive territory with the italics section of your story. I get that you were probably trying to stress Kevin's pain and anguish (or whatever) but repeating yourself is still repeating yourself. Sometimes keeping it simple, short, brings more stress to a point than repeating it three more times. And while I do like the vagueness of what's going on, a little more description wouldn't hurt; we're in virtually no setting (I assume a hospital) surrounded by people. Since this reads like a prologue of sorts, hopefully you spend more time detailing the next chapter. Remember to describe your characters (it doesn't have to be in one clump; you can slowly bleed it out (not to be punny or anything now) in small sections, like "She brushed the brown hair away from her eyes" or something).

Thanks for your input, I'll keep all of that in mind. The setting is meant to be rather vague to leave a lot to the reader's imagination. Also, to be honest, I already have a lot written, but I will keep these things in mind when writing more. I may go back and edit things later. Also, I meant to put this in the non-pokemon section, I'm not really sure what happened. It'd be great if it could get moved.

CHAPTER 3
"I still don't understand, though." Kevin shook his head, and put his hand on his forehead. "Thinking about it just gives me a headache."

Eris looked at her feet. "You don't remember anything?" She had an expression that Kevin couldn't quite make out.

"No. I don't. I know that I've been depress for the last few months, but I can't remember why. And I can't remember what made me....." His voice trailed off.

"Do we need to spell it out for you, man? You had major girl problems. Pretty stupid reason for an attempted suicide if you ask me, pal." Holden looked as though he was getting frustrated.

-SLAP-

In the blink of an eye, Eris had gotten up and smacked Holden with all of her strength. Looking at her face, Kevin understood what the expression on her face had been.

A single tear fell from her eye.

"You don't understand anything, Holden! Be nice for once! You don't even know what happened!"

"Well, then since you know everything so well, why don't you tell him exactly whose fault it was that he got so depressed?" Holden said, rubbing his cheek.

Eris looked up, shocked. A single tear again rolled down her face. Something Kevin said seemed to have startled her. "It....it was me, Kevin. You killed yourself because of me."

---

The final bell rang, meaning everybody had to be out of the school. People shuffled in and out of view, like lemmings over a cliff. People got in their cars, and drove off. Some walked, enjoying the light rain that was falling, while others ran straight to their cars, hoping not to get too wet.

"Eris, I don't understand. Why didn't you just tell me before?"
Kevin was on the edge of tears. "Why couldn't you just tell me the truth?"

"I have been telling you the truth, Kevin! You just haven't been listening! You never listen to anyone, you just sit there sulking all the time!" Eris was getting angry, and her voice started to raise. Her voice echoed off of the walls in the back corner of the yard they stood in.

"But I always listen to you! That, I'm always sure of! Everything you've ever said, I remember! Which is why I'd make a good boyfriend, not that it matters now!" Kevin's voice raised to match Eris's.

"Kevin, I'm sorry that you misinterpreted everything. I would love to be friends with you, because you are a really good friend, but that's all we're going to be. I'm sorry if I made you think differently." Eris had calmed down, and was trying to comfort Kevin, but it had the opposite effect.

The rain fell harder than ever, running down Kevin's face so it was impossible tot ell the tears from the rain. "You said you loved me! Why would you say that it you didn't mean it!?"

"I meant as a friend, Kevin! I say that to all my friends!"

Kevin sobbed, and turned away. " I can't believe you'd do this to me. I really thought you liked me." He started to walk away.

"Kevin, wait! I really didn't mean to hurt you!" Eris started to panic, and ran at him.

Suddenly, a great pain filled Kevin, and he turned around and pushed Eris back. "Don't you care about me!?" He screamed at her, and ran off, his silhouette quickly vanishing in the rain.

On the ground, dazed, Eris looked after him, and wished she hadn't worn all that eyeliner this morning as the tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Yeah, Sarah has been calling me constantly for the last day or two, asking for updates and stuff. I just started to ignore her, to be honest." He grinned again.

"Sarah...oh, right. She probably freaked out, didn't she? After all, she was the one who really tried to help me..." Kevin blinked, and thought back to the previous night. "I must have passed out at the last second...it's almost like I didn't really want to do it." The more he thought about it, the clearer it was..

"Sarah was the one who really saved me, I think."

---

"Man, I can't believe those guys. They went into the park without me!"

Kevin was sitting on the bus with Holden and some other people, and had just realized that his group had stayed gone a little too long. "I knew I should have been suspicious when they all had to go to the bathroom at once." Kevin bit his lip. "What am I going to do now? I can't just wander the park alone. This school trip sucks."

"They must have thought you were too depressing, man!" Holden chuckled to himself, as thoguh he had just made a great joke. "Don't sweat it though, bro. You can come with our group. Is that alright, Sarah?"

Kevin looked to the seat next to Holden. There was a blonde girl, dressed in clothing that matched perfectly and looking out the window excitedly. "Sure, Holden! The more the better! This'll be really fun!" She climbed over Holden and jumped into the aisle. "We haven't been properly introduced yet! I'm Sarah!" She held out her hand, a little too close to Kevin's face for his liking. "I'm, uh, Kevin. Nice to meet you?"

"Is that a question or a statement?" She giggled and jumped up. "Okay, let's go! It's the warmest day of the week, and Florida is just waiting for us!" She ran off the bus. Kevin gave Holden a questioning look.

"..Hey man, she's hot, alright? Not...that I care much, anyway." Holden blushed and looked at something on the ceiling. "Uh-huh. Okay. Sure. We should probably follow her before she gets lost." Kevin snickered to himself, and they got off the bus, following Sarah into the amusement park.

On his way out of the hospital, Kevin's phone buzzed. He looked at it and saw "48 Missed Calls." He sighed, and waas about to put it away as it buzzed again. Looking at the screen, he saw Sarah's name appear.

"Hello?"

"OH MY GOD! YOU'RE ALIVE!" Kevin held the phone away from his ear for a second, wondering if the damage was going to be permanent.

"Yeah, I'm alive. I just got out of the hospital. I'm on my way home, actually."

"I'm so glad you're alive! I really don't know what I'd do without you! You're like, my best friend in the world!"

"I'm pretty sure I would have gone crazy! You were there to help me through my relationship with that stupid Holden, and you made me feel better when he broke up with me!"

"Uhm, didn't you break up with him?"

"Oh, yeah. Well, it's not important. I still wouldn't have been able to do it without your help! You should really come over here, I need to see if you're still in one piece!"

"Well, I guess I don't have much better to do. I'll be over in about 15 minutes, okay?"

Kevin winced in reaction to what could only be described as a high-pitched squeal. "Yaaaaay! I'm so excited to see you! Bye, best-friend-in-the-whole-wide-world!"

"Bye, Sarah." He closed his phone, and walked toward his car. He was about to open the door when he felt a hand place itself firmly on his shoulder.

"Oh no you don't! There is no way you're driving yourself home in your condition, mister!" Kevin turned around, and Eris was standing there with his keys in her hand.

Kevin immediately reached into his pockets.

"Don't bother looking, silly, I have them right here." Eris thrust the keys toward his face. "Are you sure you really want to go to Sarah's?"

As he got in the passenger seat, Kevin replied, "Yeah. I mean, she's my best friend. I think she wants to make sure I'm okay."

Eris had a look of mild disgust on her face. "Best friend, huh? I guess I really don't deserve that title, considering what I did to you. Y'know, Kev, I really don't like her. There's something about her that just bugs me."

"Oh, is somebody getting jealous now? Well now you know how I feel." Kevin crossed his arms in a pout.

"Oh, shut up, it's not even the same thing. Do you want me to drive you or not?"

"I could care less, honestly. Do whatever you want." Kevin looked out his window.

"Maybe you should consider being nice for once. But fine, since I care about you....give me directions."

They were silent the rest of the ride, and Kevin got out at the end without a word. Eris looked at him, wondering if he was okay, and felt a mixture of regret and anger as she drove away.

---

"So you're saying that I actually saved you!?"
Sarah looked at him with a look of excitement.

"Yeah, I think so. If you hadn't tried so hard to stop me, I might have actually succeeded." Kevin looked at her, feeling grateful.

Her house was normally-sized, and he sat on a tan couch next to her as the tv mumbled nearby.

"Let's not talk about it too much though, I don't want my mom to know about it. If she knew what you did, she'd never let us be friends!"

Kevin nodded in agreement. "Alright. Let's never speak of it again."

"Oooooh I looove this movie!" Sarah was looking joyously at the TV, where some silly romantic comedy was playing. "I just think it is so cute how the two best friends are actually in love with each other the whole time! Isn't that just fantastic?"

"Fantastic isn't the word I'd use, but sure." Kevin replied, with the faintest hint of sarcasm.

"It's just like in some of the books that I read. I really wish life could be like a movie, or a book. Don't you ever wish that, Kevin?"

"Honestly? Not really." Kevin shook his head. "I may not be satisfied with my life, but books and movies just feel so...fake. I like it the way it is."

"Well, I certainly would love it! I think life needs some excitement, don't you? Some drama, some romance? Honestly, I really think life is like a storybook of its own." Sarah giggled. "Your sarcasm is cute, though."

Short one tonight. By the way, I have many more written; I'm just posting them here at regular intervals. I originally had the chapters be shorter, so each chapter here is basically 2 of the original ones. If you really want to read more, there's a website link in my signature. For now I'll just post one chapter per night though.

"So tell me more. What happened between you and her?"
Sarah was laying on the couch, with her leg up on Kevin's lap.
"And be careful, I'm getting surgery on my knee soon. Thanks for letting me stretch it out." She giggled a little bit.

Kevin blushed a bit. "Well, basically I just liked her and she just pretended I didn't exist. WHen I told her, she acted all surprised, but I know she knew. I gave her a stupid teddy bear, how do you not notice something like that?"

"Well, she's probably just an airhead. Not your type anyway. So screw her, you can make new friends! You have me, after all!" Her eyes glistened a little bit. "All you need is a perfect best friend, right?"

"...Right. But it still hurts. It's been less than a month, and I'm still feeling it." Kevin sighed. "Why can't romantic stuff ever work out well for me?"

"I know how you feel. I mean, you know what happened with Holden. And it was the same with my last two boyfriends, too! Nothing ever works out well for me either." Sarah sighed a heavy sigh and looked at Kevin. "I really wish I could find the perfect guy, y'know? One who really understands me."

"Yeah, I know how you feel. You want your lover to be your best friend."

There was an awkward silence.

"Oh, so my surgery is on Wednesday. Do you mind coming with me? I could really use my best friend's support." Sarah looked at him like a puppy.

"Excuse me, Kevin...I need your help with smoething." An unfamiliar voice. Kevin turned around to see a short girl with fire-red hair.

"Oh, hey Ayala. Sure, what do you need help with?"

"Just some of this math homework. I dont't quite understand it."

"Oh, sure. Here's how it works...." Kevin started to show her the basics of algebra.

"Oh good, looks like Kevin has made yet another new friend. Ugh. I can't believe that boy." Eris raged to an uninterested Holden.

"Nah, man. They aren't that close. The're just math buddies, after all. Besides, I know Kevin still cares about you. He's just miffed at you is all. He'll come around."

"I hope so, Holden. I don't like the way he's been acting ever since he started hanging around that Sarah girl." Eris looked as though she might throw up.

"She has this weird effect on guys. It happened to me, it'll probably happen to him too. I know he has feelings for her." Holden looked down. "He's been mean to me, too. I hope he doesn't have the same problems I did."

"Are you okay, Kevin? You've looked really out of it since lastt week." Ayala looked concerned. "It was like, you looked super depressed for a while, but now you're almost glowing. What's been going on?"

"Oh...not much, really. I can tell you about it later if you like, since we have lunch together." Kevin gave her a small smile.

"That'd be cool. I'd love to hear about it." Ayala smiled brightly at him. "So we'll discuss it at lunch."

---

"Wow, that's all really sad. I can't believe that all happened to you. And in so short a time. I'm glad everything's getting better now, though." Ayala gave him the same smile she did earlier.

"Yeah, it's been rough. I'm doing better, though. Slowly but surely, Sarah is helping me get out of this depression. Suicide is the farthest thing from my mind." Kevin smiled at her.

"So are you two dating, or what?" She gave him a knowing grin.

"Dating? Uh...we, uh, nope. Just friends...uh, why would you think, uh, that?" Kevin started to sweat a little and looked at a very important spot on his plate.

"Oh, just the way you talk about her. Sounds like someone's starting to fall in love!" Ayala looked positively gleeful.

"Love?! I am not falling in love. Okay, I admit it. I like her. But I don't think we'll date. She's my best friend. I don't think it woudl be smart. I've seen what happens to close friends when they date." Kevin looked unsure.

"Aha! I knew it! Silly boy, I knew you weren't in love. Not yet anyway. I think you shoud try it. If you're really as close to her and as good a friend as you say, you'll be fine, I'm sure."

"Yeah...maybe it's worth thinking about. I dunno. I'll see if she brings it up first." Kevin looked more unsure still.

"I get it. You're still scared after what Eris did to you. Well, it's alright. Just wait however long you need to, then go for it." Ayala grinned.

"Yeah, you're right. It'd probably help me move on, anyway. I need to stop being so down." A bell rang. "Oh, looks like lunch is over. Kevin stood up. "Ayala...thank you for talking to me. It's good to have someone I can talk to about Sarah, since...well, you know."

"Oh, of course! Anytime. I'm always happy to help! Here, let me give you my number. Then you can call me or text me anytime you need anything, okay?" Ayala smiled. "I'll probably see you after school, but if not, see you in math!" She almost skipped away.

"Yeah...see you." Kevin hesitated a moment, then walked on to his class.

Kevin awoke to a loud beeping noise, coming from his phone. "What a weird dream..." Rubbing his eyes, he looked at the screen. "Who could possibly be....Eris?" He picked up the phone.

"How dare you stand me up, you jerk?!" He didn't have a chance to say hello before Eris's voice pierced his inner ear. "I thought we were going to hang out? Where the hell WERE you?! I waited for an hour and you stopped answering your phone!"

"Eris...I'm so sorry, I was in the hospital, they don't allow phones to be used in there." Kevin looked at the clock. To his surprise, it was only midnight.

"THE HOSPITAL!? What!? Why!? Did you...oh, I am going to KILL you!"

Kevin coudln't figure out why she was so angry for a moment, then realized. "Oh, no, sorry. Not for me. For Sarah. I went with her for her knee surgery."

"Oh, thank god, you scared me. I see now. And this was more important to you than spending time with your best friend?"

"...I'm sorry, Eris. I really needed to be there for her."

"But what about me? You promised me you'd be there! Don't you care about me anymore?"

Kevin sat in silence.

"Hello? Kevin? Come on, I can't believe you would just blow off your best friend like that."

".....I didn't. I spent all day with my best friend today. Goodbye, Eris."

"Kevin! Don't you hang up on me!"

Kevin put down his phone, and laid back in bed. He fell asleep soon afterwards.

---

A connection is being tried.

Soon it may break, if not given the proper care.

If you continue to act this way, doubtless the integrity of your soul will revert.

"No, I think I know what this is. There are stories that say we have another side, a voie that helps us with our lives. Maybe that's what it is. Whatever it's saying, you sould probably listen." Ayala looked certain.

"I would, but I can't ever remember what it said. Maybe it'll just stop." Kevin chomped on his burger again.

"I'm serious, man. I don't want to see you get hurt." Holden had a surprisingly dark look on his face.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. We talked about this already, Holden. I know what I'm doing."

"No, you don't. So shut the hell up and listen to me for a second. You don't have a clue what you're getting into. All I'm saying, is to be careful. I'm not kidding around right now." His whole demeanoer had changed. He seemed darker and angrier than usual.

"...Are you okay, Holden?" Kevin looked concerned.

"Promise me."

Kevin looked confused. "Uh, what?"

"Promise me two things." Holden looked more intense than ever.

"Okay...what?"

"And you need to MEAN it this time, Kevin, or I swear I'll kill you."

"Yeah, yeah, let's hear it already."

"Dammit, Kevin! I'm not just joking around here! Promise me that one: you will be careful about Sarah, and two: that you will never try to kill yourself or hurt yourself again."

"Yeah, yeah, I..." Kevin's sentence trailed off as he looked into Holden's eyes. He'd never seen them become so intense. "I promise."

"Thank you." Holden sat back. "Well, now that that's over, let's finish our sandwiches, man! You gonna eat those chips?" Without waiting for an answer, Holden grabbed them and started shoving handfuls of them into his mouth.

Without a warning, he had gone back to normal.

---

You have penetrated the final barrier.

Your souls lie together now.

They are now as close as most people's can get.

Enjoy the intimacy while you have it, for intimacy is only asking to be harmed.

"What!? Who could you possibly have told already!?" Sarah looked annoyed.

"Don't be mad! It's just Holden, and he figured it out. I didn't tell him." Kevin put his hands up in defense.

"Hey, you watch where you're putting those hands, mister." She gave him yet another sly grin as he blushed and put his hands down. "I'm going to rip that boy a new one, though. He better not tell anyone anything!"

"I'm sure he won't. It's not his style."

"What do you mean it's not his style!? That jerk is a loudmouth. He'd say anything to get into a girl's pants." She snickered.

"That may be true, but still. I'll ask him about it tomorrow, alright?"

"Okay, deal! Besides, who is he gonna tell? It's break now, he won't have anyone to talk to."

"Implying that nobody likes him."

"Hey, I'm just stating the obvious." Sarah giggled.

Kevin was starting to feel uncomfortable, so he changed he subject. "So..what did you ask for for Christmas?"

" I don't ask for stuff for Christmas. I know my mommy knows me super well, so I trust her to get me stuff I'll love. And she always does! How about you?"

"Oh, not much, just y'know, a new tv, and a PS3..."

"Boy, are you greedy! That's okay though, because you're allmine anyway!" She giggled.

Kevin laughed. "Y'know, I think this is the best present I could have asked for."

"Me too! This is the best Christmas ever!" She giggled again, and looked up. "Oh, would you look at that?"

"At what....oh." He looked up and saw mistletoe hanging from the ceiling.

"You know what that means, you silly boy!"

---

His phone buzzed yet again. "Man, it's midnight. When is she going to stop calling me?" Kevin looked at his phone. The name "ERIS" was displayed on the screen. "Might as well answer it, I guess."

"Hello?"

"Hey, you answered! Why haven't you been picking up your phone!?" She sounded tired. "I've been needing to talk to you!"

"I'm sorry, I've just been really busy, y'know?"

"Making out with your new girlfriend, amiright?" She had a mocking tone. Kevin wasn't sure if it was serious or joking.

"Yeah, I...wait a second. How did you know about that!?"

"Holden told me, duh. That boy is such a loudmouth. He'd do anything to get in a girl's pants. All I had to do was ask him reeeally nicely!" She laughed.

"I...I see. Ugh. I'm going to kill him! Can I call you back later, Eris?"

Holden laughed. "Yeah, she hated my guts. I don't even know why. I was nice to her and stuff."

Kevin grinned. "I think you have a unique definition of 'being nice,' man."

"Maybe. But yeah, we did fight a lot. Sometimes it just felt like..she wasn't on my level, you know?"

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Like she's off in her own world sometimes."

"I think she really is. But I'm sure everythign will be fine between you two. You're better for her than I was."

"You really think so?" Kevin smiled.

"Yeah. You make a great couple, man!" Holden wore a huge smile.

It looked a bit fake to Kevin.

---

"So, how many boyfriends have you had, anyway?" Kevin smiled. "I won't get jealous, I promise."

"Well, let's see here. There was Ethan, Mark, and Leon, so three." She giggled. "I'm not very experienced."

"Wait, what about Holden? You dated him for 6 months."

"I don't count him. He was a jerk."

"So just because he was a jerk, you don't count him as a boyfriend? That's kind of sad."

"No, it's justified, truuuust me. He made me hate myself. He made me feel like less than a person. All that jerk wanted was to get laid."

"Oh, come on. It couldn't have possibly been that bad."

"Have I told you how far I've gotten with other boys?"

"Uh...no, but I don't see why..."

"Making out. That's all, and only with one of them. I'm a scaredy-cat, Kevin. I don't like being pushed. I like to take things slow. But holden didn't understand that." Sarah looked as though she was ready to cry.

"It'll be okay, Sarah." Kevin embraced her. "Tell me what happened."

"Well, one day after we had been to the water park, we were kissing on my couch. And then...." She hesitated.

"Go on."

Sarah looked as though she was in a different place. "..."

"Sarah? Keep going. Please?"

"...oh, sorry. Just...bad memories."

"I understand. Go on. I'm here to listen." Kevin hugged her tighter.

"Well....he asked me if I wanted to...you know."

"Right....then what?"

"Well, obviously I told him I wasn't ready yet, and that I wanted to wait. But he pushed me. He pushed me really hard."

"Right. I pushed him off and kicked him out for the day. After that he never tried again, but he kept asking me. Eventually it just got old, and that's part of why we broke up. He just made me feel like he didn't love me, that he was only in it for sex."

"But don't you think he would have just broken up with you, if that's all he wanted and he didn't get it?" Kevin looked puzzled.

Sarah shrugged. "I dunno. He's weird. But it still wasn't fun. I hated him for that. I still do, actually. He is just such a jerk."

"Yeah...I always knew he was obssessed with getting in girls' pants, but I never thought..." Kevin trailed off.

"Well, It's over now, and I have you!" She grinned at him. "And I knwo you're not the kind of person to try anything."

Kevin nodded. "I promise. I won't ever push you."

"Thank you. Kevin, you're really an amazing boyfriend. It's only been a few weeks, but I already feel super close to you. I just emptied my heart out onto you, and you accepted me for who I am. It's like we're perfect together."

"Yeah. I try my hardest." Kevin smiled at her.

"Hey Kevin?"

"Yeah?"

"I need to tell you something important."

"What is it?"

"....I love you."

---

"She seriously told you that!? After three weeks!? What did you say!?" Eris looked like she had seen a ghost.

"Well, what else was I supposed to say? I told her I loved her too."

"Kevin! How could you possibly be in love with her, hon? You've only been dating her for a few weeks!" Eris was exasparated.

"I know that! But really, it feels more like a few months. I mean,I think I started to fall for her when we were just friends. I think I've always liked her."

"But Kevin, that doesn't make sense. You liked me, remember?"

"Yeah, but I think I also liked her." Kevin looked down. "It's confusing."

"Alright Holden, you have some explaining to do." Kevin walked up behind Holden, who was, as usual, stuffing his face.

"Whaddddya wammnffa tahhhk bout?"

"Uh...what?"

Holden swallowed." What do you want to talk about?"

"It's about Sarah. About something she told me."

"Oh....she told you what happened, right?"

"Yeah. I can't believe you, Holden." Kevin shook his head. "I didn't think you were that kind of person.

"I'm not. She was the one who asked me."

"Don't lie to me! Why would she do that!?" Kevin slammed the table. "Don't you dare lie to me about this."

"You know, man, you've changed. I don't think I like it.

"Stop avoiding my damn questions! Tell me why you did it!"

"Why bother? You won't listen to me anyway." Holden dumped his tray in the trash. "Besides." Holden stared him deep in the eyes, a flame raging in his eyes. "If you really won't listen to the guy you've been best friends with for years, you aren't the Kevin I know." He started to walk away.