Monday, September 17, 2012

Feminist Fairytales: Little Red Riding Hood

Fairytales irritate me terribly. Most of the classics portray women as naïve idiots, not worth mentioning unless they are beautiful or evil. I would love my daughter to grow up with stories that feature powerful, intelligent women, so she can have role models that have actually achieved something besides looking pretty.

My goal is to re-write some of the classics and change the story around to what it would be if the heroines were smart and strong. Unfortunately, a lot of the stories would be incredibly short, but I’ll do my best to make them a little humorous. And if you feel like writing your own little feminist fairytale, please join me for my Monthly Writing Challenge!

Photo by jkettn, stock.xchng

Once upon a time, there was a sweet little girl who lived with her mother on the edge of a forest. Her name was Little Red Riding Hood. Hood’s grandmother was very ill, so she and her mother decided to bake a cake for the poor granny. After they finished the cake, they gathered some other treats together- wine, chocolate, and some sandwiches- so Hood could deliver them to her granny who lived a couple of miles away in the woods.

“Now, sweetie, don’t forget to stay on the path. You never want to get off the path when you’re in the forest! And watch out for the Big Bad Wolf. Remember what I told you about him- he’s a tricky one with big ears and a big nose, etc. Just overall big with lots of hair. If he bothers you, you know what to do.”

“Mother, I wish you didn’t worry so much. I will go straight to granny’s house.”

Off went Little Hood into the deep, dark forest. She was enjoying the exercise, singing to herself and admiring the scenery. Suddenly, she saw the shape of someone up ahead on the path. She prepared herself.

“Hello, little girl! Where are you going to all by yourself?”

“I am going to visit my grandmother to bring her some goodies. She hasn’t been feeling well.”

“Ah, how interesting. Where exactly does your grandmother live?”

“She lives right down this path in the clearing.”

“Little girl, I think you should take your time on this beautiful day and enjoy the forest. Look down there, off the path: there are so many beautiful flowers to pick. Maybe you could even make a bouquet for your grandmother”, suggested the wolf, who was coming up with a plan that would allow him to eat the grandmother as well as Little Hood.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Wolf, but I have no time to lose. I do not wish to go off the path and really must continue my journey now.”

The wolf sneered at her: “Well, in that case, I’m just going to have to gobble you up!”

Little Red Riding Hood, without batting an eye, put down the basket of goodies, pulled out her sword and chopped the wolf’s head off. Hood’s mother had taught her how to defend herself from an early age.

She continued down the path to her granny’s house, who was overjoyed to see her lovely granddaughter. They enjoyed cake together while they chatted. After granny had had some wine and chocolate, she felt much better and went out to find the wolf’s corpse. She skinned him and made a nice rug for her sitting room.