Living in the minority

Being married carries loads of benefits, and I’m not talking about just those benefits the government provides.

Those joined in matrimony get deals on everything from vacation packages to car insurance. And, as a married man, I also want to take advantage of these things. But until recently, I’d always been hesitant when the question came around.

Case in point came when I was looking into a couple’s cruise vacation package.

“Are you married?” the representative asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“And does your wife have a passport?” she asked me.

“Yes,” I answered.

Why was this so stressful for me? Why couldn’t I just be honest? The truth is I’ve lived in Utah my entire life, and being honest about my marriage is not only awkward for me, but it can possibly be dangerous. But as I was changing my car insurance policy the other day, I decided I was going to test the waters.

“Are you married?” the insurance agent asked me.

“Yes,” I replied.

“Does your wife own a car?” the agent asked.

“Actually, I’m married to man.” I said hesitantly.

Yes, it was awkward for the both of us. After all, a very small majority of St. George’s population identifies as gay, and an even smaller portion is legally married. So even if I did give off that “gay vibe,” the odds were in that poor agent’s favor when she assumed I was married to a woman.

She was very friendly, though. She asked where we got married and how long we’ve been together. In the end, I’m glad I was honest.

Of course, not everyone in our fair city might be so quick to accept us.

Regardless, our marriage is legitimate. We had it done in California just a little more than a year ago. And since the two of us are committed to each other, I think he deserves to be called my “husband,” not my “friend” or, if marriage is assumed but he’s not around, my “wife.”

Hopefully, the people of St. George, no matter what their religious beliefs or political affiliation, can respect the commitment he and I have for each other, and respect the commitments between the LGBT community members who are married or who want to be married. We all get to share the same city, so we might as well recognize and respect each other.

And you know what? Even though it’s been only about a week since I corrected someone on the title of my partner, I’ve got to say: so far, so good.