Are there any movie-lovers in the house? What other sugar-worthy cinema should be added to the list?

Low-Key Arrangements…

Not all arrangements involve neon lights, fast cars, extravagant meals, luxury suites, or Hollywood flare. In fact, some of the most enjoyable arrangements are spent decidedly low-key, perhaps with a nice bowl of Kettle Corn and a good flick on that new Blue-Ray DVD player Sugar Daddy just bought you 😉

Has anyone here simply wanted to relax with their sugar, whether it’s playing a two-player on the system, sipping some lemonade on the back porch, or enjoying a nice laid-back game of miniature golf?

What you do for fun with you sugar is one thing, and then there’s what you do for kicks… should I even ask if there’s such a thing as ‘low-key’ kink? Speak up!

cre8tor:

“low-key? Oh yes….a nice winter evening by the fire, glass of wine, good music. Watching a movie, cuddling and then going from there. Even cooking together, dancing in the living room. then there is the time I served dinner topless. And this weekend? a hike looking out over the vineyards, away from everyone, a blanket on the ground, bottle of wine…..use your imagination.”

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79 Responses to “Sugar Movie Night?”

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You made some good points there. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog.

Pilatessays:

Thanks !! very helpful post!

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Hi there

BlondeinNYCsays:

Janey, it’s all up to the individual and what they’re looking for and what they want in life.

JaneyWsays:

In most of these movies, the sugar baby usually ends up in a regular relationship with an average Joe after she has been with a sugar daddy. I have found it difficult to date guys who are not wealthy since I’ve started dating sugar daddies. Is it possible to go back to regular dating? Has anyone else found it hard or a waste of time to date guys without money?

It’s your first step to a better life; it’s a first step to emotional wellness, and I congratulate you on being so very brave and loving yourself.

In the morning call around for women’s shelters, they have the resources that can help you. If you were by me, I’d put you on my couch.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

BlondieNYC, Thanksi! I moved out yesterday, but could only afford one night at a different room in the hotel… it is over, and I’m looking into colleges out of state for the Spring, but I won’t even Think about staying another month in this relationship, living with him… Mind you, I don’t want to come off like I’m an innocent angel, but sometimes a pair just isn’t right for each other. Thank you all again! Looking forward to hearing updates from All!!!

BlondeinNYCsays:

SB SanFranDidle I’m really proud of you, hang in there.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

thank you all, i’m hoping everything gets brighter, and it already has. wishing all nothing but peace, you’re great people. ok, it took me about 30 minutes to write that you have all helped me through this, in a way no one else has or could. now, if i’m going to do this, i’d better keep getting my mind right, and learn more about myself and how i got here… *a song starts to play at this internet cafe, haven’t heard since the 90’s* “ma’hay ya ma ma ma…. ma hay’ ya ma ma ma” little things like that suddenly seem huge! bless all of you, your souls. (that, another 30 minutes, lol)

SuthrnExec as always you say the most wise and uplifting things. Count me in as one of your biggest fans, and let me say this, I’m proud to know you.

SuthrnExecsays:

SB SanFranDidle, your story makes me ache for what you’re going through and makes me want to go to the Bay area and kick some SD ass! Why would someone seek to destroy the life of someone else? (rhetorical question here – obviously this SD must do that in order to make himself appear superior). Glad you’re getting out. There are a lot of people here who care for you and who can give you good advice. That’s the great thing about this blog.

The SD/SB relationship SHOULD be a non-zero sum game such that both should be better off in the end. It should never be one-sided (as in SB SanFranDidle’s case) nor should both parties be loosers in the end. Maybe I’m living in a theoritical world – dont’ think so – but I think both can, and should, be winners.

BlondeinNYCsays:

Cre8tor, have I said lately how much I admire your clarity?

cre8torsays:

Yes to all the comments and encouragement. I’ve been where you are SB SanFran. Strut on out of there and to a better future. You are waaay too young to be at this point. there are so many great years and great experiences you haven’t even thought of yet.

SB SanFranDidle I’m proud of you; start looking at Craigslist.org in your city for roommates situations NOW, also check out women’s shelters.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

Blondie & Racheljay —

Thank You! I will be better off without him. I will use my next check to check out of here. it will be hard, because of obvious reasons, but if i’m here i better be here away from him and into creation. now, if i just had a SD who could treat me to a low-key fireside snuggle — but that can wait 😀 First things first – moving out. being me. here we go

Do know that your I.Q. Doesn’t necessarily mean you are all that smart. Most people don’t know but intelligence expands as you learn.

If you take college courses, and get a fre degrees under your belt, retake it, you’d put his smarts at a loss for sure.

BlondeinNYCsays:

SB SanFranDidle, I really don’t know you except from what you’ve written, so my insights are based on what you write, and from what you write, it doesn’t sound like you’re in a healthy relationship.

First and foremost, you need to honor yourself, to love yourself, to hold yourself in high esteem before you get involved with anyone. If you find yourself involved with someone who continously belittles yourself, you gotta ask yourself a few questions. Why would anyone let anyone knock them down pyschologically? Why would someone who professes to care about someone belittle them constantly?

I could go on and on about psychology etc., but if you are in an unhappy relationship and have no money, there are women’s shelters that you can go to and get not only a safe haven, but job skills and more.

I urge you to take good care of yourself.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

cre8tor

this is a situation in which i have started out with someone as a person full of potential and hope. my 21st b-day was when i moved out here, because i had what i thought was ‘potential’. but since i’ve been with this person, everything i used to feel good about – my body, my face, my intelligence, my personality, my unique group of diverse friends I’ve had throughout my life, my world view that I had sacrificed everything to keep as profound as possible — everything, has been made to feel worthless since being with this person.

yesterday i was foolish enough to take an online IQ test in front of him. i did the whole thing in front of him, and 4 or more of the questions on my version of the test were also on his version of the test. mind you that after this year and 4 months we’ve been together, the last fiber of confidence i have is that i’m somewhat ‘intelligent’, but still, i’ve always been the type of person quick to self-deprecate just to make sure someone else doesn’t become crushed as a result of my being ‘better’ than them at anything, because I know that no one is truly better than another, in the end.

well, after he watched me take my test, and i scored 97, he took his, and scorred 114. when the verdict came through, he lowered his head slightly and smirked. everything inside me turned to mush, and i have never felt more worthless. after all the degrading over the last year. after the complete lack of social interaction with anything or anyone except Him for over a year, essentially cutting off all of my family, and any friends i had being over 100 miles away, i feel completely … i don’t know what i add to this world. so i’m 22 realizing that i’m used goods, knowing that my best days are behind me. but gladly, i know now, after a good sleep and some painful slits and a few attempts via the air fresheners to shorten my journey, that i’m still here, and might be for another long spell.

thank you cre8tor for helping to throw much needed cold water on this face

cre8torsays:

SB SanFran…..you are scaring me. We’ve all had our bad experiences. to live through them and come out on the other side stronger, more understanding of ourselves and more confident that we can deal with the next time is what makes you a person of character. And, there will always be more experiences. Its how you take them…an opportunity to grow and learn from or an opportunity to feel beaten up. Don’t try to be accepted, just “be”. if they don’t come, enjoy your own company and they have lost someone worth spending time with.

JaneyWsays:

BlondeinNYCsays:

Definition:In game theory and economic theory, zero-sum describes a situation in which a participant’s gain or loss is exactly balanced by the losses or gains of the other participant(s). If the total gains of the participants are added up, and the total losses are subtracted, they will sum to zero.

I am again getting tempted to “ask her out.”

SB SanFranDidlesays:

thank you blondie, that was very very calming, and i really thank you.

BlondeinNYCsays:

SB SanFranDidle I’m sending you a virtual hug chica! People, including me get huffy all the time on the blogs. You can be as sarcastic as you want to be here.

What you wrote about how the foundation of an arrangement is created is correct. We all have brains and mouths, so it’s up to us individually to ask or state what we need. Chicago wants an SB who’ll cuddle and spend low-key time with him. All he does is either (a) ask the current SB to try it or (b) find an SB who likes the down time as well as the high life.

Just be you, okay?

SB SanFranDidlesays:

hi chicago. i am sorry for what i said. don’t seriously mind me. i don’t want you to think that i was being mean or anything. i honestly don’t know what i’m doing. i am lost, and scarred, and pathetic right now. you will find what you want. this life is short. really. sometimes even shorter if you want it to be. it’s kind of sad, all of the experiences i had. i really think about a lot of times, and smiles, and cries, and things that i remember, but i don’t know if i want to stay here… i thank all of you, for listening and reading my comments. that means more than many of you will ever know. i have spent my life trying to be accepted. and it never worked, thats ok because it’s all i knew. it’s all i knew or felt. this comment makes no sense, and is a good example of me in general. i make no sense in general. i have ‘issues’ as you all can see if your reading this. but the good thing about times like these, is that people who aren’t fit for this place – earth – living- can have a good reason, a nobel reason if you may… to leave. good night my friends. keep fighting. stay breathing. and if you can smile, do it maybe. maybe that’s good. if you have peace. enjoy it. ok? is that what i’m supposed to say in the end? something like that, something not self-absorbed. that’s my best try. maybe we are all totally selfish after all…

the above has nothing to do with anything.

someone should answer your question chicago — it was deeper than i took it originally. i won’t waste anymore of anyone’s time. i think you are all great. over 250,000 people are on this site, and none of them take the time to do anything in the way of thoughtful honest conversation about this. except for you guys. I love you…

BlondeinNYCsays:

ahem, ahem, oh, do I have your attention?? Good, wait, is the mike on? Okay this is what an SB/SD relationship means to me. Remember, I’ve not had one yet, so I could be waay off base.

I get to spend time with an interesting, fun and funny sexy guy.
I get to have great conversations with him, perhaps share dinners, drinks and activities.
I get great sex (of course I’ll return the favor…wink..wink)
And I get an allowance on top of all that other fun stuff?

Ye gods, how bad is that? Really? Why the hell do you think I signed up. Yeeesh, just the idea of spending some time with a smart, intelligent man has me salivating.

lisasays:

I prefer married sds though. I have a thing for married guys as I had an affair with one for many years. The museums and sitting around watching tv would be difficult when you have to be discreet, and after all the married ones can sit around home with their wives watching tv. when I was with my married lover, we just held each other under the covers and talked about stuff like his kids or mine, problems with his wife, or just other light conversation.
As far as me being straight to the point, I have tried being subtle and the guys are not subtle to me. Almost everyone message I get the guy mentions imtimacy on the first email, you know the , “we’re adults” line.
This site is not about dating but if that happens that’s great, but I prefer to be realistic and look at any sd as temporary fling. Some of these men just don’t get what this site is about. It is a woman providing companionship and enjoyment to a gentleman in return for assistance and spoiling. I have found in regular dating, guys expect to get physical on the first date which is not my style at all, and they don’t even want to pay for dinner.

Good night. I’m off to bed, have to get up early to work tomorrow.

BlondeinNYCsays:

Lisa, it sounds to me like you want to keep them at arm’s length, while digging into their wallets. It doesn’t sound great at all. I dunno, I’ve never had an SD, I’m an SB virgin (whoo hoo or EEEK!), but it seems to me this is more than just “gimme gimme gimme” on one end and sex on the other. If it was only that, this would be an escort site.

If and when I get an SD, I think it would be more than dinner and sex. I think it would be conversations, doing stuff whether it’s boating, going to art galleries or museums, sitting around watching movies and just relaxing. To me, the idea is that two people have created a bubble where they can retreat.

?? huh?

NitemareSDsays:

LOL!
I am sure Lisa will let us know when she finds an SD for whom what she gives is what he wants.

lisasays:

I’m justing putting it straight up. I would love to find a serious relationship and spend my life with someone, that’s were you do the movie night and stuff but I’m tired of wasting time with guys that won’t commit so I am going them. Now i’m looking for a gentleman to spend time with nsa that will make it worth my while. I want excitement and fun and high energy stuff.
I want a real sd/sb relationship, where we give each other what the other wants.

Chicago SD, you’ve been hanging out with the wrong crowd!

Lisa, do you have any idea how what you wrote sounds? It really doesn’t put you in a good light.

Chicago SDsays:

SanfranSB,

what made you think I give my SB no money or $100 on low key dates? I’m saying that my SB experiences generally don’t like cuddling, kissing, hand holding, or things normally associated with a GF/BF relationship. And I’m truly surprised there’s so many SB’s out there that do that with their SD.

lisasays:

I think low key is best reserved for a serious bf/gf situation. I had many pleasant evenings with my ex in which we stopped by the store picked up a roasted chicken, rented a video, and came back to his place, ate , and layed in bed and watched the movie, and he took me home the next morning. But it was a regular dating relationship and I was hoping it would lead to marriage and foreverness. A sd/sb relationship should be more exciting although an occasional down date is ok if the sd or sb is feeling tired or too lazy to want to go out. BUT I wouldn’t want a sugardaddy who just wanted to stay home watching videos because I can do that by myself or with a friend. I want to go out to dinner, shop, go to movies at the theatre, etc.
I also agree that there should be more to it than watching a video, if a man wanted me to spend the night with him watching videos and not going anywhere, I would expect a little financial gift. His company would not be enough for me, that’s what bfs are for.

Blondie great comments and I agree completely…nothing better than that !Add to your thoughts an an occasional glace in the others direction and a quick smile and you have heaven on earth imho.

cre8torsays:

so happy to feel the warmth here And Blondie…I’m with you all the way.

BlondeinNYCsays:

I think low key is not only a great way to get to really know one another, after all the foundation of any type of relationship is friendship, but to continually go out to big dinners et al can not only put a strain on the relationship, it makes it hard to get to know the other person, so you have two people acting instead of being.
Give me a couch, a book and a lover on the other end of the couch reading, that’s bliss.

coeddommesays:

Congrats…hope it works out.

BerkshireSDsays:

My new SB has been very low key. She actually invited me to her apartment on the first meet. I was presented with low light, candles and gentle music.

We agreed on an allowence – which starts small and will increase as the relationship grows. I suppose due to nervousness she asked too many times about receiving the money, but I let it go because I already knew her well enough to realize it was just that and that it is her first time. Now that she has seen she doesn’t need to concern herself about the allowence, she doesn’t mention it.

I very much want to take her out for a nice evening, we just started out low key. It is making it easy to build trust and a bond.

Today we are going shopping to have things (food, candles, etc) at her apt for both of us to enjoy together. I’ve also given her extra spending money for that.

Under promise and over deliver.

She has provided a wonderfully comforting atmosphere in the early stages of our arrangement that I appreciate and cherish. She has me looking forward to a level of companionship that will be solid and long lasting.

kisses Berkshire 😉

this herbal stuff isn’t too bad, but nothing like a quad grande americano!

BerkshireSDsays:

Cool

SB SanFranDidlesays:

cre8tor:

I’ll admit, I was a bit caustic. honestly, i blame my coffee intake. sorry BerkshireSD, and Chicago, didn’t mean to be so, um… yeah. But, well, my point was that if you want a low-key thing, be upfront about it. now that i’ve read some of the other comments, i do think that you could do a low key arrangement with out overcompensating on the giving either. really, this is too complex for a one sided answer, as BerkshireSD said. Now, i must go and have some chamomile tea 😉 peace out

cre8torsays:

one more thing, whatever the activity is, the “reward” for participating is not how much money is exchanged….a movie at home doesn’t cost only $50 and a night on the town $400. That is just too weird. sounds too much like shopping to me and I’m not a shopper.

cre8torsays:

as I heard someone say just a short time ago…peace out everybody. I want to clarify what might have started a misunderstanding on this subject. My SD is someone I truly am connected to and being the romantic sort with a need to have a balanced life, I like to do the low-key as well as the bright lights and big city, bling thing. Both those things are included in the overall experience of our relationship. Even if we have a low key evening, the arrangement is what was agreed to. Let’s not get all upset about what words are used or how they are used. Keep your egos in check. I think we are really all on the same page here. Calm your jets. No need to be offended. And, thanks, I appreciate the nod in my direction. Now, to find those hiking shoes and that blanket.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

racheljay:

I do agree that not all SB expect a large gift right away, but I also know that it’s not something that a SB always feels comfortable about — asking —, and sometimes (attention Mr. BerkshireSD), SOMETIMES, SD’s might take advantage of that meekness. Now, I don’t want to ruin this thread entirely!

This is about low-key arrangements. I would love to have one. I just joined this site, and I’m excited to see what kind of mutual benefit I and an emotionally intelligent SD will be able to work out. I think low key can mean something different to everyone. But, what I think it always Doesn’t mean is pretence. Yes, that awful feeling of ‘trying too hard’ to impress. That’s why I think low key can be so important in an arrangement.

coeddommesays:

@ Rachel–Yeah, I definetely don’t expect a hand out every single time. With my first SD, our initial arrangement was to meet up twice a month with a preset amount for an allowance. At first, we did do the wining and dining, extravagant get-togethers.

But then we started meeting for lunch, having dinner twice a week and he did increase my allowance but I certainly wasn’t expecting an envelope for having coffee at Starbucks, ya know?

I think an arrangement, business-transaction type of relationship…then there’s that solid expectationf or a handout every single time

When there’s a friendship or even romance, the lines get blurred and the low key things comes naturally.

I don’t know what myopic means, that must be a SD word… hmmm. me so lost. Well, at least I have a word to google 😀

BerkshireSDsays:

Racheljay: that was a good reply to an extremely biased and myopic view of what an sb (and sd) is.

racheljaysays:

I love your train of thought San Fran.

Yes, I think its fair to say that spending a night in and just sending the SB home with nothing isn’t very appreciated (unless you’ve both agreed on a monthly arangement and she’s already gotten it, though a lil more won’t hurt hehe)

But, some SBs don’t expect a big fat surprise every meet.
And cozying up and offering their frienship, and support w o having their hand out is for them.

I think it all depends on the individual sd and sb agreement.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

One More Thing:

I don’t care HOW OLD the Sugar Baby is – – – She spends time, and thought, a lot more than you’ll ever know, (if she’s a true American Geisha *kudos to cre8tor for coining this term* Sugar Baby, not a Pro) preparing for You, thinking about You, thinking about how every little thing you experience when your together will make you feel better as a man, as a lover, as a provider. Don’t be cheap. Please, if your going to be here, and do this, do it All the way. I love Low Key, I hate the badda bing badda boom, but I REALLY hate it when the Silent knowledge of what is Fare is willfully ignored by anyone, a SB who doesn’t give the Intimacy a SD deserves for spoiling and treating her like a queen/princess, or a SD who doesn’t give the $$$ a SB deserves for giving him the best Sex or Intimacy he’s probably ever had, or ever will have again. Age has nothing to do with it, it’s about the mind, about the experience, about what you want. If you want young, great, get young. If you want mature, than great, get mature – a cougar, or whatever. Either way, whatever your taste, if you want low key, I’m all for it my friend, but DO NOT act like you don’t know EXACTLY what is expected. That is a real sin, a quite nasty one at that, on both ends of the sugar angle.

PS: LOVE all of the above comments as well… I hope I haven’t ruined the Zen here… but maybe my Ying was needed for the Yang of this thread. If not… sorry y’all.

SB SanFranDidlesays:

Chicago SD:

If you make your arrangement clear in that you want a low-key evening, then that’s totally fine, and most girls would be MORE than happy to accept, IIIFFFF – you made sure to be a true sugar daddy and provide her with some sort of financial relief.

A SB doesn’t need any Joe Shmoe to give her a sloppy joe and a Dr. Pepper and expect that at the end of it all, without a nice pink envelope with a $$$ gift, that she enjoyed it Just as much as he did. I mean, she would, if he showed he appreciated her Youth, the Time she takes in preparing herself to look so Gorgeous for you, etc. It truly is only about fairness.

I hope I didn’t sound too blunt here, but I think from reading your post I needed to clarify…

You can totally find a SB who would LOVE to do the cuddling, movies, tv, etc. but just imagine how Used she would feel if after it was done, if you just said “wasn’t that great? OK, I’ll drive you home now… here’s a $100.00 gift card to K-Mart? Uh, HELL no. It’s more like “Are you ready to go home now? OK… then you pull her in front of her house, and hand her $1,000 prepaid VISA, or in envelope – that way she’ll NEVER doubt your intentions again, and will feel TRULY appreciated. OK, maybe $1,000 is a little much, but nothing under $400.00. Really, this is not a GF BF thing, if you want the young gorgeous girl, who’s youth won’t last forever, show her that you respect that fact, and her, by being a true SD! Love ya Chicago, thanks for letting me vent here a bit 😀

Chicago SDsays:

i am impressed with all the above posts of SD/SB’s enjoying low key dates. for some reason my dates always want the bada bing bada boom dates. nice dinners and/or hot bedroom fun. is it me or are there really lots of SB’s out there that enjoy low key dates such as movies, watching tv, cuddling, etc? seems like this is more inline with GF/BF experience to me. i would love an SB that would cuddle and enjoy low key moments. but the one’s i’ve met prefer crazy shopping trip, fancy dinners, etc.. i mean if they want low key, they can do that with a real bf or with a frined.?? a bit lost here.

cre8torsays:

rain on the roof, snuggled under a big fat down comforter, the scent of the fireplace and your arms wrapped around me. cocoon me. Winter is upon us. the lights and exciting places to visit are fun but I think my main sustenance is one-on-one in my home just “being”.

Here’s another movie for your list – Daisies (1967) – an avant-garde piece that was ahead of its time. The characters are sort of the female version of the characters in DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS.

SuthrnExecsays:

Low key for me… well, it’s set-up by a great night-out the night before… we sleep until we wake and then with the morning paper, we enjoy breakfast in bed – whether it’s brought in by room-service or I fix it – doesn’t matter. After a relaxing breakfast, we go for a walk – maybe it’s a walk on the beach or along the lakeshore or along the cove… But it’s a nice leisurely walk, with lots of conversation about whatever… Later on, we have a light lunch along the seaside/lakeshore/mountainside on the patio of a nice little café – talking and people-watching. After lunch, we do something a little more active – horseback riding, sailing, hiking – then it’s back to the chalet with a glass of wine, a fire and light jazz playing in the background where we discuss whether to freshen-up and go have a nice dinner, stay in and watch a movie, or stay in and … 😉

Yep! I’m relaxed now just thinking about it!

cre8torsays:

low-key? Oh yes….a nice winter evening by the fire, glass of wine, good music. Watching a movie, cuddling and then going from there. Even cooking together, dancing in the living room. then there is the time I served dinner topless. And this weekend? a hike looking out over the vineyards, away from everyone, a blanket on the ground, bottle of wine…..use your imagination.

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