Empty

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I haven’t felt like this in a long time… Empty. At least, that is the best way that I can describe it (no this is not some cry for help for a mental health issue.. fyi, just in case you were wondering).

I guess we all have emotional “ups and downs” but right now I’m not even on the parabola: I’m not happy, sad, excited, surprised, ecstatic, angry, depressed etc.

I’m just feeling mighty empty. Like I said, I wish there was a better way to describe it hmmm. .. It’s like the 1st circle of hell of Dante’s Inferno (limbo, I think it’s called, it’s been a while). You, know with all the people standing and waiting, for what or for who, they don’t know.

I’ve felt this indifference on many an occasion before and growing up, whenever I felt this way I would ruminate over what to call it and whether it was better to feel a negative emotion rather than not feel one at all. At least when you angry, you have a purpose a focus. Something gets you rattled, you actually care about the outcome of one or many things. But right now, I really don’t.

I think at a certain point we get disgusted and frustrated with the world and just give up on it, maybe that’s what this empty stage is about for me: some people become focused on the after-life, some people comitt suicide, some people adopt a “Brave New World,” carpe diem attitude. Me, I just feel empty.

You know what, maybe I needed this, there have been a host of things that have been bothering/points of concern for me for quite some time, but right now, “Frankly my dear I don’t give a damn.———————