From the very low, lows of ivf to the highest high of it actually working out.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

First day w/o meds!***

***regular ivf stuff not included. But no valium, no nausea pills. The first day where I woke up and didn't feel significantly bad. I had to pee and I tried to ignore it to sleep in -- but the longer I did, the more my right ovary hurt (they're swollen, bladder's nearby). So I got up but it continues to be sore. But who cares? Cause everything else is so much better. I'm still energy-less. Went out to breakfast, drove to a few errands with C then had to come home and sleep. But I am just so grateful to feel this much better. It's like when you're feverish and it clears. C and I feel like we've been out of the country for a week because everything has been put off. We had a bunch of stuff we were going to plan for the summer, some stuff we were going to take care of for the house... Things just keep popping into my head like I've been drunk for a week -- things that happened, people I was supposed to email... anyway, feels good to be back. Or almost back.

Of course now that I have any energy to think -- my thoughts go to am I preg or not. C and I both don't want to test at home yet. We're both scared about dealing with it being negative. We will go crazy and get upset. Even though last time my tests were negative, it's cause my beta was so low. If that happened this time, I still would be worried that it's because the embryos weren't good and that even if one implanted it would be fizzling out. So, unless we're get a clear positive result -- it's going to be horrible and we're just not ready to deal with that.