Tufts of hair from my hair are sent to a homeopath for analysis. It began when I started school at the age of seven. My mild stuttering grew strongly worse. I had to fight for myself. One memory that I'll never forget was when I was in the schoolyard fighting with guys around me, we had an entire leash of kids cheering around. Why we were fighting, I do not remember but coming into the school world was probably the worst thing that happened to me regarding my speech. I could not even talk to my mom. Nothing worked. My speech organs were locked. To loosen it, I came pretty quickly to the conclusion that if I also stamped my foot, I managed to speak passably. Mom and Dad knew that I was not feeling very well, and my aunts in the North of Sweden told me about a remedy, so they cut tufts of hair from my hair and sent it to a homeopath who analyzed it. The homeopath told me that when I was a kid I had run out on what I thought was grass, but that proved to be tufts in the water. I tumbled from the tussocks into the water and probably got a shock. It was also claimed that I had run into a cyclist - an event that I remember but then I was older so it isn´t true enough. In the Stuttering Association, I have learned that parents of stammering children both look for and need a reason for why their children stutter. According to my parents, the above mentioned shocking involuntary bathing was the direct cause of my difficultlies when I started school. And with hindsight, I realize that I was one of the most difficult stutterers that Sweden has ever seen. I have not received any award, however, but I have received an unusually long suffering. These difficulties that I got when I was seven were an unusually big problem. It has taken over five decades to make me function fairly smoothly. Today I know that I am a sensitive person where small changes in my life can both lead to recurrences and hesitatation. Here the story begins of a problem that people generally do not want to cope with, but actually is there for those who have it - chronic stuttering!

Stuttering Treatment at the Karolinska HospitalAs a 10-year-old it was time for the first real stuttering therapy. I don´t remember the background but my parents finally understood that the situation was troublesome for me. They arranged that I was able to come to KS and under the leadership of the phonetician Dr. Kågen I received therapy. It lasted for three months. That meant that I was free from school and that I had board and lodging in a family my parents was acquainted with. On weekdays I went to KS and read aloud from a book to a sister. Over the weekends I went by train to my family in Rimbo.

For me it was a nice break in the ordinary school work, I am sure. It was actually thrilling to come to Stockholm as a ten-year-old. I explored Stockholm on my own.

The bus from Solna arrived in Stockholm at Norra Bantorget.

The streets I traversed were the downtown streets called Vasagatan, Kungsgatan to PUB and vice versa- this impressed some people in my environment at home.

Coming back to school in Rimbo it didn´t take long until everything was as before. The impact which was positive on the speech disappeared depressingly quickly but I had nevertheless been trained to become proficient in reading aloud.

The Karolinska hospital again At the age of 17, it was time again for KS’s Dr. Kågen´s real stuttering therapist Hans Danielsson. The physical environment was a couch. I was talking to a blind man who also was a stutterer. He was low-voiced, asking and listening. Even this therapy passed rather unnoticed. What we didn´t know was that our ways would cross later again in life a couple of times.

1963 - Hypnosis with triple doctor Björkhem in Saltsjö-Boo “The last straw” appears periodically. My mother Stanny who worked at the insurance company Responsible came home with advice from the job. I was sent to a doctor with all three degrees, which meant that he was so unique as to be triple doctorate - his speciality was hypnosis. I was also curious to know if hypnosis could really work for me, so I tested immediately at the train's arrival at Saltjö-Boo if I could buy something without stutter. As expected, I stammered. When I came back from the John Björkhem´s house where I had received hypnosis, I did the test in the kiosk. It turned out that I stuttered as much as before. In this way I kept on all the times I was with him.

He was internationally recognized. He went to America as he always did. When I met him on his return he looked tired, shortly after that he died. He could not help me. In the case of hypnosis, it is said that one must be receptive, which I interpret that you have to be extra sensitive. To test reality in the way I did was probably a sign that I was not.

Therapist Per Olof Broberg

He meant a lot for me. He became my friend, he was my support, he became like a second father to me. Our relationship became very good. What brought us together was just that he treated stuttering individuals. He did it his way: Thorough as he was, he studied the problem in Germany. When he then practiced his knowledge in Sweden, he discovered that it didn´t work - then he did exactly the opposite of what he learned in Germany, so it became his method of treating stuttering individuals.

When I met him for the first time he was already an old man but nevertheless boasted loudly of his youth and vitality. I was in my twenties and felt pretty powerless in his company. Many famous actors trained in a working Chest Support using diaphragmatic breathing and emphasis in the right places on the basis of his technique. It was controlled by putting my hand on my stomach.

I had to sit in front of the mirror to see what I did. When I spoke, I was looking at his mouth. He pointed frequently out that it was important not to tighten and squeeze. We often practiced on different alliterations where all words started with a B. What I could think of was complete relaxatio n, hay bag, air in the stomach, moving his lips. Look in the mirror gymnastics. Always watch the other party´s mouth, never replace the words or change the sentence! The tongue should always be loose and soft. Never squeeze or stretch. Concentration was an important word. In front of the mirror was a young man named Stig, who looked in the mirror without the slightest narcissistic feeling, a shy, nice guy with love problems who didn´t want anything else but be loved by Christina and everyone else.

Per-Olov Broberg had been a traveling therapist of stutterers. He advertised in local newspapers and then came to the city's hotels to receive stuttering patients. Maybe there were also other types of patients because he was involved with homeopathy as well. I have a letter from him stating that he is speaking and psycho-educator with specialization: Speech disturbances (Stuttering), obsession, fear of speech and inferiority complex.

Even this treatment and the accompanying techniques were difficult to transfer to the precarious reality that most of the time is outside the treatment system.

When non-avoidance came I accepted it.

The furniture store I think I was twenty-five years old. One of the most unusual therapies began when I and my partner looked at the sofas in a furniture store. We bought a sofa set. The furniture salesman was interested in my stuttering and wanted to help me. It took some equipment I could buy from him. It consisted of a glass container to be filled with water and also a glass tube. Now I should practice breathing and stamina by blowing bubbles for as long as possible.

The salesman visited me at home two or three times. I experienced it as a hassle. It was not long before the equipment was shelved and forgotten. Now, some decades later, and during this writing, I think actually that the idea may not have been so stupid. Why could not the furniture retail dealer have said that speech sometimes requires effort and that it is good to say the whole sentence in one breath. There will be no interruptions then. Speech can be stressful in other ways as well. It is not just to talk but also to know what you are talking about and to whom. He may have said all this, but at this time in my life, it did not work.

Systematic desensitization At age 26 it was time for Bengt Edgren and Gagindra Persaud trying to do penance (1971). They shot the gun but what they really needed to shoot was a cannon or an instrument with even heavier caliber. The organizer was the P-club.

With the help of desensitization technique people can be helped to overcome their fear of spiders for example. The training is to teach the patient to touch a spider and let it crawl over his hand.

Creative drama 1974 the course leader was actress Inger Juel. Probably she was one of the pioneers in this genre. The organizer was one of our educational associations.

Drama1978 and 1984. Dramatic exercises. The circles were arranged by the P-club, association for stutterers.

Sabbatsberg - Speech Therapy by Eva Foyer Traditional medical therapy, where the treatment consists of half hour sessions. The therapy is based on the patient who decides what the conversation should be about. The length of treatment was one to two semesters. This and many other treatments that are about stuttering usually have the intention to give the opportunity to speak with a competent interlocutor. Understandably, then, is that stuttering associations make sense.

Psychodrama in Torsgatan 1977.Somehow I came in contact with psy-chodrama. Sten Larsson, the actor who worked with Karl Gerhard was the leader who directed his patients. The patients were mostly those who had different phobias. He described this with the phobia as a conflict between the emotional and intellect, which in turn manifests itself in various forms of terror. Phobia is, strictly speaking, not a disease. I was only participating for one semester. It felt new, large, and magnificent but also demanding. We were divided into groups, actors versus audience. I got to feel what it is about to act on stage. What we did was to play what we talked about earlier in the group. We played our own problems. The idea was that the operator would be aware of the problems. The stuttering problems were too severe and blocked my actions on stage because everything inside me was untouched and unaltered.

KS again with Dan Mogren - more terms Group as a sole therapy. We drummed on with the Sven Smith method. Voluntary stuttering and voice exercises, control of speech rate, variations at different rates, everything to gain control of the fluency of speech.

When I think of how I speak today in 2006 I discover that when I'm about to stammer I stop and start over in a new way. The listener has not noticed this stuttering - I am very satisfied with this way of speaking. I do not know if I'm unique, but I've never been able to take my techniques in a positive way during the actual therapy sessions - that will come later or much later when I can be permanent in my pace.

Stromstaterapi1978 in P-club´s premises. We worked for two years.

The Speech Therapists in Old Town. 1986 - 1987, 1991 - Gun Scollin o Anita Franzen. They were good for they introduced something new in the stuttering therapy.

Anxiety of speech. Successful drama exercises were taken place in the auditorium at Rosenlund Hospital.

Qigong - Easier movement gymnastics where the movements are thoroughly but gently.

Grief Recovery. Completion of pain caused by loss makes it possible for us to let go and move forward with renewed energy and joy.

EST.1980. Group Process with the USA as country of origin. It all comes down to 200-500 humans get together over a weekend and are concentrated in exercises during the two days. It is approximately 15 hours per day and only breaks for meals and sleep. During the exercises, it is a leader who instructs participants to think about and imagine certain things. The purpose of the exercise is that you must learn to know yourself better.