Role Playing During Sex

Here's A Damn Good Way For The Two Of You To Turn Up The Heat In The Bedroom

Tell her your fantasiesEveryone’s fantasies are different. But make sure it’s one that includes her, or she’s not going to be into it. House suggests you incorporate her into your role playing fantasy. “I have imagined you in a hot cop outfit, punishing me for misbehaving. You get on top of me and take control as I slip myself inside you.”

Dress the partPeople love wearing costumes because it lets them lower their inhibitions and try “someone else” on for size. Sex in the privacy of your bedroom can afford the same opportunities, so take full advantage of it. “I work at a few erotic resorts in the Caribbean (Desire Resorts and Hedonism II) and the couples have so much fun picking their outfits and dressing up that they can't help but reignite the spark!” says Astroglide's Resident Sexologist, Jess O'Reilly (better known as Dr. Jess). "Oftentimes, the most appealing roles are those that stray most significantly from our lived reality. If you manage great responsibility at work or in the home, you may derive great pleasure from indulging in a submissive role. And if you spend most of your days catering to everyone else’s needs, playing a selfish role may be the perfect escape from reality,” she says.

Learn to talk dirty“Role play is often more about what you say than how you act. Dirty talk doesn't have to be raunchy, it can be romantic (You're the only one I'll ever want), instructive (Get down on your knees and open your mouth!), descriptive (I'm going to bend you over and have my way with you), inquisitive (How do you like it?),character-based (You're my dirty little whore) or raunchy (Taste it!). Just be sure to talk about your boundaries ahead of time,” says Dr. Jess.

A wig may be the way to goIt’s the easiest way to change either of your appearances in an instant — and easier to do than changing into a whole get-up. But you’ve got to suggest it in a smart way, says House. For example: “I wonder what you would be like as a brunette with chin length hair. I bet your personality would be a little different too. You’d probably be tough on me, like a drill sergeant. You’d be sultry and edgy. I’d only be able to handle that you for a few hours, or at least for a quickie in the bathroom. It would be fun to see you in wig like that.” Let her wheels start turning.

Find your grooveSometimes, it's a little cheesy. It might feel a little awkward at first. But once you're comfortable with the idea of role playing, the sky is the limit, says Drake.