I am not as simple as I seem.

By Anonymous, West Tisbury, MA

Image Credit: Alex S., Bethesda, MD

The author's comments:

This poem was inspired by the fact that since I have cerebral palsy it affects literally every aspect of my life. I'm really spunky and outgoing, so my friends and family always say, "Oh my God, you would be totally out of control with out CP." People don't always realize that it affects everything. This is my interpretation of what I would be like with on cerebral palsy. Beware, there are some shocking but tacit reference to bulimia, drugs, and sex in here. I won a local poetry contest for it. Enjoy!

as my bones may turn

to rust

and i am not

what I seem

I am a ballerina…

mentally spinning as i

am physically

taking

flight

and landing

perfect on the

1 2 3 4

of the floor

i have no blood on my knees

only bruises i plan to keep

for grace

i do not fall

i dye my hair

and call my friends

and put on makeup

and gracefully

eventually, I will go to N Y U

and learn the art and craft

with girls’ nights out

and red lipstick

smeared while we were cackling

i have

shoved my tongue down

x amount of boys’ throats

wanting more and more

I have been heartbroken

but not traumatized

and i have broken hearts before.

i have gone

to parties

i have danced

until i fell over.

i have gone for hikes

i appreciate the outdoors

i eat more than i should

i have cried until dawn

i have shoved my head into a toilet bowl

i have painted the most beautiful things you have ever seen

i have danced in Lady Gaga’s dance troupe.

i have been drawn

i have bought way too many expensive clothes

and maxed out credit cards.

i’m decent at math

i don’t have fits

i can actually

control my emotions

to a normal level… at least considered okay.

(yes, I am a drama queen, though)

i’m not striving to be perfect.

(at least when I know I can’t be)

the only times i’ve ever felt guilty

was when something was actually my fault.

i have done everything that i should.

only, one thing;

it’s a little buzzing word beginning with C

cerebral palsy.

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