<deepspring> well.. my car just passed it's blueslip inspection and I mean just...
<deepspring> the mechanic said that he found plenty of "minor" issues that I would have to fix... luckily he let them slide
<deepspring> minor oil leak from the automatic transmission
<deepspring> bad hatch alignment
<deepspring> one of my driving lights (little halogen addon ones) was buggered
<LrdShaper> bad driver behind wheel
<deepspring> my ignition key can drop out of the ignition while the engine is running
<LrdShaper> right front wheel held on by masking tape
<LrdShaper> but the cathodes and led fans are what made himover look the problems

<ChangWufei> it was well funny when we all went in a gay bar, they all just stared at us
<ChangWufei> hehe
<loveya> u went in a gay bar???
<ChangWufei> yeah, we didnt realise at first
<astrotrain> what... that you were gay?

<RugNug> naw......just reboot
<crak_pipe> that works
<RugNug> and fantasize about keeping the inventer of popups in my basement for a coupla years
<crak_pipe> hell yah
<crak_pipe> lemme beat on him for a bit as well
<RugNug> heheheh......i could make millions......with a cover charge

<Tleilaxu[UN1]> I am soon to be my own corporation!!!
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> now to start the shady deals and insider trading
<BigSax[UN1]|aboot> send some stock tips my way
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> im the only stock owner... guess i shouldnt try to cheat myself
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> ill be a type-s corporation
<Tleilaxu[UN1]> tried for the faster type-r for the extra horsepower

<manero> so our friend, she's in the part of med school where you do all the genital exams and shit
<manero> and prostrate exams, etc
<manero> and a couple weeks ago, they had to do it on a real person for the first time. and so she was very nervous
<manero> so she's doing the exam, she does the front and everything is ok
<manero> and she does the back door and she gets through it all
<manero> but at the very end, as she finishes
<manero> she didn't know how to tell the dude she was done, so she slapped him on the ass
<manero> i had tears running down my face for 10 minutes after she told the story
<blach> alright bitch, im done with your bunghole *smack
<manero> the funny part was the dude was like 60, too

<[CMF]O-Face|wurk> uhm, I never thought that "I am BREADMAN! With the POWER TO EAT A SLICE OF BREAD IN 1.9 SECONDS!!! - would be a valued superhero power.
<Commando^> Superheros have gone downhill recently

<+HackerDragon>: uhmmm yeah I had some lube and "other objects" wrapped up in a towel under my bed. My mom decided that she was going to be nice and do my laundry for me today cause she is home sick. Yeah I just looked under my bed and the lube with objects is there but no towel...

<q[merlyn]> lem... know any good austin Perl hackers for hire?
<q[merlyn]> I'm on a hunt for one for a friend.
<archon> for a job?
<Stupid_> No, in his spare time merlyn bow-hunts for perl programmers by their scent.

<Murr> DrForr, presumably the tank crew *knew* how to swim, but not how to escape from a tank with open hatch that had turned on its roof before sinking.
<DrForr> The tank flipped over -then- sank? Now that's rich.
<arkuat> what is this about? cisco is building tanks now?
<Winkola> arkuat: If they do, you can count on a lot of drowned newbie net admins.
<Winkola> "To report a drowning emergency, press 1, and hold for 27 minutes."

<Mutiny> I'm having this teeny problem and I want to know if somebody can help me with it..
<mjd> mutiny: Sever the main neck tendons before cutting through the spinal cord. That will allow you more opportunity to separate the vertebrae prior to removing the head.

<Pinkie2> some guy pissed me off today so i sat on my scanner to send him picture of my ass and the glass broke i just got back from getting 15 stictches
<Louey> pinkie you serious?
<Pinkie2> yup
<Dk__> lol
<Louey> and what was your excuse at the hospital?
<Dk__> you had a really bad day
<Pinkie2> sittin on one cheek right now
<Pinkie2> i told em i sat on a drinkin glass my kid put on chir
<Louey> ahhh
<Dk__> we'll probably be seeing flatbeds with weight restrictions now on
<Dk__> or warning labels, do not sit on glass
<Pinkie2> hehe
<Pinkie2> im gonna sue
<Louey> and now your out a scanner and no retribution for the fuck who made you sit on your scanner
<Pinkie2> next time i will just shit on the scanner and send that to him
<Dk__> ROFL
<Dk__> good idea
<Louey> haha
<|Korombos> Pinkie2 Sometimes man, it is best to remain quiet and thought a fool, than to do what you did, open your mouth and remove all doubt!
<Dk__> heh
<Louey> kor=confuscious
<Dk__> a inspirational quote from kor

<MEGA-Shrike> lat you off my xmas card list
<MEGA-Shrike> you now on another list
<LatinoReheat> list of "Who to make love to before im 30"?
<MEGA-Shrike> THE LIST OF ALMIGHTY PUNISHMENT, PAIN, DEATH AND GENERAL NASTINESS
<LatinoReheat> so shrike, the "Who to make love to before im 30"? then

<Sugoi-Cless> Lat! what have I told you about eating packets of gravy you find in parking lots!?
<Latino|Working> the same thing you told me about peeing in the sink cless <Latino|Working> "its fine if no ones around"

[ LopeDogg ] u know warren
[ LopeDogg ] he always talks about weed affecting him
[ LopeDogg ] questioning whether it does or not
[ LopeDogg ] then he said he went to muyi tai once
[ LopeDogg ] stoned
[ LopeDogg ] and took a piss
[ LopeDogg ] then as he walked away from the urinal he wanted to flush it
[ LopeDogg ] so he pressed his alarm remote
[ LopeDogg ] then when it didnt flush he was like what the fuck

<Shawn_Michaels> u no, the moon landing was fake, right?
<t3hpwn> Only in the US will you find people who think the moon landing was fake and wrestling is real...
* Shawn_Michaels kicks t3hpwn in the nads
<t3hpwn> The truth hurts, eh?

<The-Jim> Next time I fly British Airways I'm gonna steal the little knife, fork and spoon, they're like 2/3rd the size of normal ones, gonna keep them in my bag.
<xace> do it
<xace> then when people try to make you use a spork
<xace> be like
<xace> FUCK YOU I HAVE MINI FORK, KNIFE, AND SPOON