Sleeping With The Enemy: Vermont Catamounts

Tonight is the most anticipated rematch of the year- we’ve got the Cats in our house and a win over the ‘Stache could swing UAlbany out of it’s middling purgatory. We’ve brought in Oscar of the America Least to answer our intricate questions and he came back swinging. Fittingly, he responded to my email at 6 am, probably while watching the previous nights final Jeopardy that he just couldn’t stay awake for. Here’s a Four Loko on us, Oscar. It’s what all the young kids are having to stay awake these days!

Who is hot right now for Vermont scoring the basketball? How are they doing their damage?

No one, really. Brendan Bald has become more of a scorer as defenses throw all they got at Fjeld. Accaoui has hot games, freshmen Luke Apfeld and Sandro Carissimo have shown signs of scoring. Overall, it’s just a team that struggles to score but finds a way to get it done. Except against Maine when they couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn.

What three point threats will UVM seek to deploy against our vaunted matchup zone?

Not a lot of choices there. Accaoui, Bald and Matt Glass. The real question is what UVM will do to abuse your big sissies at the back of the “vaunted” zone. Why play against Ambrose and Black when you can kick Puk, Devlin or Metcalf around?

Why is Mike Lonergan still in Vermont? Is he too boring? Does he need some flair to distinguish himself- like the Belichick hoodie or the Mike Brey mock turtle neck suit?

Dude, boring isn’t noticed in Vermont. Ever visit? Lonergan is a foreigner for crying out loud. If you listen closely, he has a Maryland accent!

He is still in Vermont because no higher level program wants him. Mike doesn’t have a warm, fuzzy personality as did his predecessor. However, the little guy and his staff can recruit.

Maybe he needs to wear a baseball cap. That’s a bad hair thing he has going there.

If Joey Accaoui steps in front of Tim Ambrose to take a charge off a fast break, would the remains of his 5’6 frame just vaporize?

Why would you mention Accaoui and defense in the same thought? You still believe in the tooth fairy? Preposterous.

Just how good is Brian Voelkel? To paraphrase, he basically said he can score at will when necessary (ok, perhaps I’m painting him as the villain here by ignoring 95% of him team-centric quote). Is he the next Joe Trapani? Does he have skill to play in a higher league?

Voelkel is a basketball player. Not an athlete, not yet a scorer. Without him, Vermont isn’t close to a .500 team. In the coming years, he will be a scorer according to his coach who said going into the season that he’d lead the team in rebounding and assists. Clearly, he’s the best passer Vermont has had in the eons I’ve been watching.

No, he is not as good as Joe Trapani. No, he couldn’t play at a higher level. Don’t let that buoy your mood however. He’ll continue to improve for three more years. And he will kick your Purple Dog asses.

Vermont fans must’ve been upset at the 7 o’clock tip on a Saturday, that’s coming dangerously close to bedtime. Should the Red Roof Inn expect a boom of AARP specials that evening since a drive home after the game is out of the question?

Umm, I’m staying there. I suppose there will be a plethora of green license plates in the parking lot. Most of us aren’t used to the big city. Should we be worried about crime at the Red Roof?

Actually, I’m going to a huge D3 game in Williamstown, MA at 2:00, so after a dual-site doubleheader you wouldn’t ask me to drive back to East Bumfuck. Would you?

And yes, and 11 a.m. game would be must better for us.

I was surprised to see that UVM plays the fastest in the America East (just eclipsed by the defenseless UMBC). What pace does UVM want to play at?

Have you seen Vermont’s half court offense? They have no guards that would make the UA roster. The offense has to run through a 6-6 freshman forward. The Catamounts need to get a rebound, take off and hope that something good happens before Fjeld gets triple teamed.

And your prediction?

Ok, Ambrose, Black and Aronhalt are going punish the Vermont back court. That will be ugly.

The Catamounts should out rebound the Danes by at least a dozen. So far, a wash.

So, it comes down to two real variables.

If the Albany big guys grow some gonads and hold their own in the paint: UA by 7.

On the other hand, if some combination of Accaoui, Bald and Glass get hot from 3; Vermont by 2.