Last-Minute Guests

I felt completely put on the spot when, the night before a small dinner party I was giving, one of my guests called to ask if she could bring along her sister, who was visiting that weekend. I said yes, though it meant more food, some new seating arrangements, and general aggravation. Was I wrong to feel angry?

No. That kind of last-minute request creates a real hassle. When you first called your friend to invite her to dinner, she should have declined, explaining that her sister would be in town. Then it would have been up to you to extend an invitation or not. And if your friend found out that her sister would be visiting after she accepted your invitation, she should have found something else for her sister to do that night. The exception to the "no surprise guests" rule is when the planned party is large enough that one more person couldn't possibly make a difference in expense. In that case, a guest can feel free to call — even if it's at the eleventh hour — and ask whether there's room for one more.