This is no fluff, straight to the point, action based information that can change your life.

To be happy and start living fearless, you only need to know this: You’re not here to win, you’re here to learn.

The more you accept this, the less fear, stress, and anxiety you’ll have in your life and the happier you will be.

All fear is imagined; thus the side effects of stress and anxiety are self-inflicted.

The secret to living a fearless life is truth. Truth about yourself and the purpose you have in this world.

How to Be Happy

If you put in the dedication of knowing yourself completely and un-dividing your mind, you’ll discover it’s the same with stress and anxiety; it’s all imagined or created in your mind. Yet, even though many accept this logic (of our mind being our biggest problem), then why is everyone still running around full of fear, stress, anxiety, and ultimately unhappiness?

One reason is we’re chasing an illusion; the illusion of success and winning defined by society, parents, friends, etc. I too lived the illusion for many years.

Since my early twenties I had this image in my mind of what success looked like. It consisted of a loft apartment overlooking the city and driving a Porsche. My idea of success had nothing to do with personal character or the individual I would become; it was based on status and materialism. I would set all these goals for myself, reach them, and then trudge on to the next one. I was never satisfied and still full of fear, anxiety, and stress.

Are you stuck? Maybe you’re like I used to be. Trudging through life, not really sure what is wrong while disliking and fearing two things; the way things are and change.

I was lucky. I become desperate enough to seek a better way. Not the easier way—at first—but I’ve certainly discovered how to be happy. So can you.

Are you ready to start loving yourself?

Our wedding service consisted of Emily and myself, our wedding official Caroline, and about a dozen chickens. As part of our service, Caroline read something that would be the foundation of our life together.

Your “homework” is to practice an ancient Sufi tradition: In your life together, speak words to your beloved only if they can pass through 3 gates: First, is it truthful? Second, is it necessary? Third, is it kind? If your words are truthful & necessary & kind, then the love you have maintained up until today will be nourished and continue to grow & your name will continue to remain safe in your beloved’s mouth.

I was standing outside talking to a few friends when she came up and asked, “would you like to catch a movie?”

Quickly my mind started racing, I needed to come up with an excuse. It’s not that I didn’t want to hang out with her so much, I honestly just wanted to get home and relax.

“Sorry,” I said, “can’t, have groceries in the car and need to get the ice cream home.”

“What kind?” she asked.

“What?” I responded, as my brain needed a few milliseconds to come up with a flavor.

“What kind of ice cream?”

“Oh, rocky road.”

On my drive home I felt guilty, so I dropped by the store and picked up a pint of rocky road. And it occurred to me that I lied for no logical reason. I lied simply because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

In that moment a rush of memories flooded my consciousness; every time I’d ever lied to someone for no other reason than I didn’t want to hurt their feelings. I didn’t want to hurt their feelings because I needed them to like me. [Read more…]

It was a typical July day in the Midwest. Hot. The previous night my wife Emily and I had returned home from a short trip to see my parents. My father, just ten days previously, had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer.

The phone rang, it was my mother. She said, “It’s dad…” and in the background I could hear something was going on; people talking and scurrying around. Then I heard my mother say to whomever else was there, “he wants to live!”

He didn’t live past that night. But he did live for 65 years. Which is more than some get.

How Do You Stay Positive no Matter What the Circumstances?

In pondering this question what first came to mind was: No matter how bad you think your circumstances are, someone else has it worse.[Read more…]