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Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Dear Anonymous Commenter

I felt like this would happen eventually but I didn't think it would on that particular "Life Lately" post. I know that I don't need to defend myself or justify my financial decisions but I really want to.

I have no problem "bearing all." I have no incoming income except for my Etsy shop that certainly isn't bringing in enough to pay all of the bills. I made a decision when Coopers father left us to do what I needed to do to keep him in his home where he is comfortable and happy; he was going to be experiencing enough change for the time being, and my parents home is quite full with my sisters family temporarily living there. I'm a college student at The University of Georgia so I get student loans. It's not much but it helps. I can budget, I make multiple sacrifices, and so ends typically meet. What I never want to have to do is have my financial status interfere with Cooper and his quality of life, so I don't let it.

{Would you like to tell me to go get a job? If getting a job right now was feasible, I would be on it. Being a single mom, unlike most people believe, does not mean that I can just get on welfare. In fact, there is no welfare to get on! Imagine that. Childcare is expensive and finishing college is my job right now because its outcome will be what gives Cooper and I the life we deserve. Technically I could quit college and become a server, but.....}

This is turning a little "white-trash" so I'll wrap it up.

Yes, I have Hunter rain boots, Cooper wears Ralph Lauren, and I even have a Michael Kors watch. Does that mean I paid for them? Does that mean they were bought recently? Does that mean I chose to purchase them over Coopers swimming lessons? Heck to the no. Oh and Coopers birthday party supplies were bought with a Visa giftcard that was given to me for Christmas. I saved it because I knew I would need it, and I did. Not that it's any of your business.

Thank you for assuming that you know it all.

Signed,

A mom that uses her blog to vent and document, not for charity or rude comments.
You suck.

10 comments:

Girl, that person had no right to assume that you had been spending money on clothes and accessories over your child. Like you said, you never know if it was a gift, when it was bought, and HECK even if you did want to splurge a little on yourself, I say GO FOR IT.

You love your little one more than anything in the world. No one can deny that.

All of that is my business because you make it my business the moment you write about it. And the moment you post pictures of yourself in luxury items that most of America cannot afford, you become subject to scrutiny.

As someone who very recently sold her own Hunter rain boots along with anything and everything else I had of value so that I could "make ends meet", I apologize if I offended you in thinking that you could be doing a whole lot more than you are right now.

But you know what? All of that is your prerogative. Keep your luxury items and post picture after picture of your Michael Kors watch, Ralph Lauren-clad child and fridge full of food. But you are not poor. Stop complaining about money problems because I'm sure there are millions of people in your own city that will show you what poor is all about.

All I know is that I would give my right arm for my child, forget about a pair of ridiculous rubber boots.

I don't know if this is allowed to be posted on the internet (let alone on your blog) but ... that person is a complete DICK. They are just venting their OWN stresses, and frustrations out on you and what you are doing with your life. Instead of seeing it from a different point of view and thinking "wow good for her she can get some fancy things."

I doubt that commenter was trying to be a "dick". But you said yourself that you expected the day would come when someone would call you out on this. When someone finally questions how you can afford and feel good about having clothes but not water safety for your child, you can't turn around and attack them. That's hypocritical and reflects poorly on your blog and your business.

Erin, I think you misunderstood. I did say that I knew eventually I would get a hateful anonymous comment -- it happens to everyone. I did not think it would be regarding anything about how I dress and provide for my son.

I really like how people read into things, especially you! I'm an excellent swimmer and have taught my own set of swimming lessons in years past. What I would like for Cooper is to be in a group of other children engaged in an activity that is age appropriate for him -- i.e. swimming lessons. We have a neighborhood pool that I give him lessons in approximately five out of seven days a week. It is not about water safety, unlike you have chosen to believe in your head.

The only thing that reflects poorly on my blog and business is people like you and the anonymous commenters being ugly over things they have no idea about. I would never attack someone over "I hope I get a large etsy sale soon so I can...." instead I would write, I hope you do too! How great would that be for you and your son.

Don't you ever wonder why the only time you get any reaction on your blog is when you've offended someone, Olivia?

Like when you plagiarized an entire Etsy store? They teach you about Plagiarism at the University of Georgia, don't they? Or now, when you mock someone who questions your spending habits after you've spent the last year complaining about being poor?

Why all the drama, Olivia? Maybe you have something to do with all the hate?

I never plagiarized an entire Etsy store. Ever. Did I use a tutorial to make an item and then turn around and try to sell it? Yes. It was then brought to my attention that she asked for it not to be used for resale, so I took the item down. Funnily, her triangle quilt that she sells, she made from a tutorial that she linked to on her blog that wasn't hers. The difference is that tutorial did not ask for people to not use it for their only money-making ways. It's still plagiarism though isn't it?

I still find it hilarious that because the only painted room in my house is the one I choose to take pictures with (and happens to be light aqua NOT teal) is considered plagiarizing an entire etsy shop. I don't use a pin wheel in each picture. I don't have a white crib or hardwood floors. I don't have a gallery of picture frames above my sons bed. And lastly, I'm much cheaper! What's to plagiarize?

I'm reading back and not seeing where I've complained about being poor for the last year. I'm also not sure where my spending habits are being mentioned either... when do I say "I bought this" and "I bought that" ? I'm really thankful for my wonderful parents who generously provide for Cooper and I through this difficult time.