Hey guys, you probably saw it already if you modified your profile in the last few days but we added a new option under “HIV Status” in your profile: Negative on PrEP. So we now have “Don’t know”, “Negative”, “Positive”, “Undetectable” and “Negative on PrEP”.

So my suggestion for you this week is “know your status”! Whether you don’t know, you’re neg, or neg on PrEP… take an appointment at your doctor or in a clinic and know your status. Not only it is important for you to know it, but also for others. Then if you want to …

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Hey guys, you probably saw it already if you modified your profile in the last few days but we added a new option under “HIV Status” in your profile: Negative on PrEP. So we now have “Don’t know”, “Negative”, “Positive”, “Undetectable” and “Negative on PrEP”.

So my suggestion for you this week is “know your status”! Whether you don’t know, you’re neg, or neg on PrEP… take an appointment at your doctor or in a clinic and know your status. Not only it is important for you to know it, but also for others. Then if you want to put it in your A4A profile, it is your decision, but at least YOU will know your status and you will act accordingly. OK?

Let’s all work together at minimizing the HIV spread.

Have a wonderful day!

Dave

]]>http://blog.adam4adam.com/2015/03/a4a-new-option-negative-on-prep/feed/3Speak Out : I No Longer Want To Be Gayhttp://blog.adam4adam.com/2015/03/speak-out-i-no-longer-want-to-be-gay/
http://blog.adam4adam.com/2015/03/speak-out-i-no-longer-want-to-be-gay/#commentsMon, 02 Mar 2015 16:13:56 +0000http://blog.adam4adam.com/?p=9382I no longer want to be gay. I know that on the surface this statement reeks of the denial, self-loathing and internalized homophobia commonly associated with accepting and integrating ones gayness but truth is, I just don’t want to be gay anymore. It has outlived its usefulness. I have experienced all aspects of the life and can safely say that it no longer speaks to the person that I am or want to become. I didn’t always feel this way.

Initially I came to this community searching for love, intimacy and brotherhood. In return, I got shade, infidelity, loneliness and …

]]>I no longer want to be gay. I know that on the surface this statement reeks of the denial, self-loathing and internalized homophobia commonly associated with accepting and integrating ones gayness but truth is, I just don’t want to be gay anymore. It has outlived its usefulness. I have experienced all aspects of the life and can safely say that it no longer speaks to the person that I am or want to become. I didn’t always feel this way.

Initially I came to this community searching for love, intimacy and brotherhood. In return, I got shade, infidelity, loneliness and disunity. The self-loathing in this community forces you to encounter a series of broken men who are self-destructive, hurtful, cruel and vindictive towards one another. I have struggled to adapt my moral code to fit the behaviors concomitant with the lifestyle but it seems that the lifestyle is forcing me too far away from everything I love and value. No matter how many times I try to purge my perception of its firmly held beliefs and skewed biases, the same classic stereotypes of gay men keep rearing their ugly heads. The indiscriminate sex, superficiality, unstable relationships, self-hatred, peter pan syndrome, closeted connections, ageism, shade, loneliness, preoccupation with sex, prejudice, aversion to intimacy all seem to come out of the ground I thought they were buried under. Gay men just seem to find it difficult to transcend the stereotypes and clichés attached to the life and it is becoming disheartening.

It has been seven years since I decided to live my life as an openly gay male and it has not been an easy road. It has been fraught with much pain and misery that I initially tried to mask with alcohol, drugs, sex and parties. In the beginning it was hard to admit that I liked other men. But I did and it was a very freeing experience. It gave me the opportunity to assert my identity when for years I struggled with this. It gave me a chance to be my own activist and stand up in the face of opposition from family, friends and society as a whole. I took pride in my gay pride and felt as though I were apart of something greater than myself, a movement of men who loved other men and who were unafraid to show it. Our love was supposed to be a revolutionary act. But the truth is, we didn’t love each other; we were just infatuated with the idea of belonging and going against the grain. We loved the freedom and taboo of rebelling against societal mores. The love that we thought was intricate to the spelling of our revolution was just a knife that we turned in on ourselves under the guise of fun and good times.

Personally I believe that love is sacrifice and not many gay men are willing to sacrifice for their brethren nowadays. Initially this spirit of self-sacrifice was salient during the AIDS crisis in the early 80’s and 90’s when resources were scarce and people were afraid. But now, there seems to be a preoccupation with the seduction of risk, as gay men play with matches, hoping to ignite meaningful connections in their never ending self-discovery. The grand prize of intimacy is often forfeited for the immediate gratification of a casual encounter on craigslist or a geo-social hook up on Grindr. Cars have become the new bedrooms and sex is not followed with pillow talk but rather phrases such as: “Blo and Go,” “Pump and Dump” and “Skeet and Leave”. The life is starting to look a lot like a slow death simmering on low heat and it doesn’t hold the same appeal that it once did to me. It is a life in serious need of renovations.

Men also used to be men and approached you with a modicum of chivalrous courage. Now they hide behind electronic masks or position themselves in close proximity to you at clubs hoping you initiate contact only to arrogantly dismiss your advances in an attempt to project their own discomfort. I have noticed that a lot of gay men seem to only want a challenge and live for the elusive. They want men who do not want them, men who resemble the emotional distance or absence of their fathers.

I am too young to long for the good old days but this life makes you miss what it meant to be gay. It makes you long for the times when a guy would greet you and offer you a drink as opposed to his cock size and sexual stats. The middleman of courtesy has been eliminated and replaced with an immoral devil who chaperons your destruction daily. It just isn’t worth it anymore. And while I recognize my attractions to men, I choose to no longer associate myself with a life that lives outside of morality and goodness. The gay life is like the love of a bad boy whose attention and love you initially covet but eventually outgrow. It’s just not where I see myself anymore.

Once a month I try to buy 1 or 2 new undies because I get tired of wearing the same and they simply change color or change form when you wash them 1000 times in one year. So by buying a few every month, in one year my underwear drawer in fully renewed and I usually buy them when they’re on sale or in Freshpair clearance section. They always have a the clearance section up to 50% off so it never cost me more than 15-20$ per underwear. I like to have great undies with great color and even …

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Once a month I try to buy 1 or 2 new undies because I get tired of wearing the same and they simply change color or change form when you wash them 1000 times in one year. So by buying a few every month, in one year my underwear drawer in fully renewed and I usually buy them when they’re on sale or in Freshpair clearance section. They always have a the clearance section up to 50% off so it never cost me more than 15-20$ per underwear. I like to have great undies with great color and even some designer undies for the price of fruit-of-the-loom. They are usually more comfy because of the fabric, nicer looking and the cut is nicer as well.

Last week I bought an awesome brief from Cocksox, do you know this brand? I never heard of it but the name sounded great to me so I bought them. They were on sale, nice color, great name and shipping is always free at Freshpair which is great. Also a small thing that I love is the seaming in the front for the cock pouch. The way it is done is very smart, it leaves your dick hanging in a natural way which is very comfortable. I wore them at the gym this morning. The 2 guys beside me in the locker room looked at me as I was changing because the bright blue color of these undies is very eye-catching. One of them even laughed when he read the name on the waistband. He said he liked the name…. I almost answered with a naughty joke about cocksucking but I didn’t. (lol)

Check out photos of me modelling my new Cocksox below…. you’ll see they look great. Sorry for the bad quality of image, I took the pics with my phone and computer. What is your favorite underwear brand?

Building on our endorsement of Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) late last year, HRC is proud to launch a new social and digital media campaign raising awareness about PrEP and encouraging people on PrEP to share their stories with friends, family and loved ones.

Participate in HRC’s #DailyBlue Instagram campaign with these three easy steps:

Show Us: Take a picture of your life on PrEP. Be creative. Be silly. Be funny. Be SFW. Just be sure to include that little blue pill somewhere in the photo.

Building on our endorsement of Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) late last year, HRC is proud to launch a new social and digital media campaign raising awareness about PrEP and encouraging people on PrEP to share their stories with friends, family and loved ones.

Participate in HRC’s #DailyBlue Instagram campaign with these three easy steps:

Show Us: Take a picture of your life on PrEP. Be creative. Be silly. Be funny. Be SFW. Just be sure to include that little blue pill somewhere in the photo.

Tell Us: Upload your picture to Instagram. In just a few words, tell us who or what encouraged you to go on PrEP in the first place. Be sure to tag @HumanRightsCampaign and use the hashtag #DailyBlue.

Spread the Word: Share your photo with your friends, family and loved ones to raise awareness and end stigma.

PrEP is a new HIV prevention strategy that involves taking anti-HIV medication to significantly reduce the risk of contracting HIV. When taken as prescribed by a knowledgeable healthcare provider, and paired with other safer sex practices, PrEP can be upwards of 90% effective at preventing HIV. Several LGBT and HIV/AIDS groups have come out in support of PrEP since the Food and Drug Administration first approved it in 2012.

Few months ago, jeweler Tiffany & Co. featured a gay couple in their printed and digital ads. This time they are back with a video that celebrates diversity in love with a moving new ad. Entitled “Will You?”

The video is full of the best kinds of questions such as, “Will you let me be the guy who gets to make fun of you because you take three minutes to butter your toast in the morning?” and ends with a simple, four-word inquiry: “Will you marry me?”

The commercial features a variety of couples, including an interracial couple and a same-sex …

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Few months ago, jeweler Tiffany & Co. featured a gay couple in their printed and digital ads. This time they are back with a video that celebrates diversity in love with a moving new ad. Entitled “Will You?”

The video is full of the best kinds of questions such as, “Will you let me be the guy who gets to make fun of you because you take three minutes to butter your toast in the morning?” and ends with a simple, four-word inquiry: “Will you marry me?”