cinemastrology: cinemascopes for the week of 06.08-06.14

Wed Jun 07 2006, 11:27pm | comments off

Here are the ten signs of cinemastrology, and — according to my informer — what counsel members of each sign have received for the coming week:
• il rosa della bussola (sign of the compass rose): Sure, everyone listens to you, no matter what you say. But only you realize the true power inherent in the slavish devotion of your minions. As soon as you figure out the many ways to take advantage of this, you’ll really take off.

• il chicco di caffè (sign of the coffee bean): You’ve learned how to make yourself useful while making yourself unobtrusive. Now is the time to push your luck. You’ll never make a name for yourself until you make a nuisance of yourself.

• il coltello da formaggio (sign of the cheese knife): Relax. Everything you’ve slaved over in recent days is settling over those you’ve served and is being noticed, if only in a peripheral way at the moment. Give it time.

• il libro dimenticato (sign of the forgotten book): The dreams of many rest heavily on your shoulders, and you can make them come true, if you so desire. Will you bring others along on your journey, or guard it selfishly for your own?

• il gnocchi avanzi (sign of the leftover potato dumpling): Once a free and freespirited butterfly, always a free and freespirited butterfly! No one can hold you down unless you let them. You enjoy a different kind of freedom today — savor it.

• il pressa enologic (sign of the wine press): Some say that you aren’t as all that as all that. You know different, and you have the attitude to pull it off, too. What have you got to lose? At best, you gather an entourage. At worst, you gather a somewhat less desirable entourage.

• il pugnale avvelenata (sign of the poisoned dagger): Time to take a stand — those who depend upon your particular skills need to appreciate all you do. You may need to be more forceful than usual. Enjoy it.

• il ratto nero infetto con peste (sign of the plague-infected black rat): A rainy day is your favorite, rare as they may be — savor them when they come, for your enemies are getting soaked. You’ll reap the rewards as they wring out their sopping selves.

• il monarca lieto (sign of the joyful king): Without doubt, you are the monarch of your world… of the whole world. Your reign can be contested at any time, though — those who would challenege your position are all around you. But if you eliminate them with a smile, they’ll still love you.

• il pittore pazzo (sign of the mad painter): The cactus on the sunporch has been looking at you funny all week, hasn’t it? Could be it’s plotting with the potted yucca tree. You don’t know who to trust these days.