He (desperately) wants to be alone

As most of you know, I’ve been married for EVER 20 years to a man I met when I was 18 and who was my first “real” boyfriend (I’ll let you play around with the reasons that word is in quotes).

He’s hilarious, kind, patient, supportive, and best of all, tolerating — five reasons I’m damn glad I gave him a second chance back in 1989 when he came crawling back begging me to go out with him (my story and I’m sticking with it).

Saturday was a monumental day for me.
The first day of the second half of my life?
Well, yeah…okay, sure.
But it was also LAUNCH DAY for “I Just Want To Be Alone,” the hilarious new book I’m so honored and excited to be a part of.

I’ve told you it was a funny book and a must read.
But now that other people who didn’t actually write it are getting to read it?They’re agreeing.

I know I speak for everyone involved in the book when I say THANK YOU for supporting it by buying a copy, reading and sharing the love with every single person you know.

Well, I speak for everyone involved except this guy.

Now that the book is published and thousands of people are finding out what he did, this is the only way he can be seen in public.

He desperately just wants to be alone.

He’s a good sport, no question.
Sure, he gets a little hypersensitive and overwrought about pissing himself and about toilet-bowl earthworms (you’ll have to read the book to find out what I’m talking about) but overall he’s a champ.

So do him a solid and buy the book (which will make all the crap that I put him through worth it).
There’s only so much that I can do.

Ew. Stop it.

The book is available on Kindle, iTunes, Nook and in REAL paper.
Check out this page to get all the links!

And come on, isn’t it worth five bucks to find out what he did that makes him feel it’s necessary to leave the house like this?