Confidence is Key

You already know this, but confidence is so important. It’s not only important for your own self-esteem, but it’s also crucial for all the relationships in your life, especially the one with your significant other.

While you may have heard the common phrase “You can’t really love someone if you don’t love yourself,” this isn’t completely true and definitely isn’t backed up by science.

However, when I’m not feeling confident, I can’t show myself the love I need, let alone give love to my boo in the way he would want or in the way that l’d hope I could!

Time to get in check! Whether you’re down in the dumps or your boo is in need of a pick-me-up, you’ve come to the right place.

Here are 5 ways to practice self-love and self-care:

Pick up a self-care routine:

Your self-care routine could be a combination of things or one specific thing you do once per day! You might choose to take a weekly bubble bath (a glass of wine and candle are recommended), take a regular walk to your favorite coffee shop, or research a skin care regimen that you can do each night before bed to help you relax and take away the day’s toxins and impurities—I’m talking internal too!

I also recommend a daily talk with yourself like this one. 😉

Learn something new:

Keep your mind on its toes! Learning something new is proven to help your self-esteem. Whether you decide to learn to make pottery or take classes at your local tech school, it’ll help you feel more purposeful and confident.

Create healthy habits:

You don’t have to be into running or lifting weights to keep your health top of mind. Start drinking water and meditating or learn to practice yoga. Even doing something simple like taking your daily vitamins can make a big difference! (Did you know that you can get a personalized daily vitamin pack from Care/Of? Tell them about your lifestyle and any health issues you’re concerned about and they’ll give you a rundown on what you need to feel your best!

Pursue your passions:

Do you have pent-up creative energy that you don’t get to use in your 9-5? Or do you have the need to give back? Find the best resources in your area and get your friends in on it! Use your free time to do more of what you love (other than Netflix and chill).

Get organized:

Getting organized can mean so many things and all of them will make a difference in your life! Figure out a budget, set small goals for yourself, actually use the calendar in your smartphone, declutter your closet, and figure out real places for all the things in your “junk drawer.” Any of these. All of these. Do them! They’ll make a huge difference in your stress level, which just might make you say, “Hey, I’m doing just fine.”

Bonus: Listen to Feeling Myself by Nicki Minaj (feat. Beyonce)

5 ways to lift your partner’s self-esteem:

Encourage them:

Does your boo love to paint? Buy them an easel and ask them to paint something for your home. Do they have a tough meeting coming up? Remind them of how much they have to offer and how much they’re worth. Have they been working really hard on getting fit? Tell them that it looks like their workouts are paying off! Everyone always need a little encouragement. Be your boo’s biggest cheerleader.

Let them know they’re So Worth Loving:

Remind your boo that no one is perfect, but that they’re pretty darn close! Get them a gift from So Worth Loving. SWL is all about reminding each person that they’re just that! No matter what they’ve been through or been told, each person is So. Worth. Loving!

Give them alone time (if they want it):

Sometimes people who are experiencing low self-esteem need alone time to recharge. Give them a day where they can be alone and practice as much self-care as possible. If they’re the pampering type, send them for a day at the spa or tell them to dig deep into their video games. Treat them to whatever will help them get back on track.

Brag about them:

Next time you go out with friends, tell everyone how your love is killin’ it! Maybe they just got a promotion at work or saved enough cash for a down payment on their dream car. Hearing you tell others how proud you are will make them think, “Oh wow! Maybe I really am doing great!”

Volunteer together:

Doing good makes you feel good. Make your next date night a day full of volunteering. Pick whatever you two are most passionate about and figure out how you can help. You could go walk dogs at the local shelter or serve lunch at the soup kitchen. It’ll be appreciated and you’ll both feel great for giving back!

Do you have go-to ways to fight the bad thoughts and self-doubt? What could your S.O. do to make you feel more confident? Let us know in the comments!

Jolena Mauch

Jo is an Oklahoma State Alumnus, self-proclaimed coffee snob and member of a one-woman book club. Best known for her quirky sense of style and world-class shade-throwing. When she isn't busy yelling "Go Pokes!" you can find her binge-watching The Mindy Project with her boo and their yellow lab. Connect with her on social media @cupofjokc