Feminism, Equalism, and the Patriarchy.

Too often I have heard self-proclaimed feminists say this:
"Feminism is an ideology that advocates equal rights between men and women".
Interestingly enough, if you search up the term, you will find conflicting definitions. You will find either the definition recited above, or the following:
"Feminism is a doctrine or movement advocating equal rights for women".
If you did not notice, those are two very different definitions. The former definition sounds more neutral in terms of what gender has "more" rights, while the latter assumes the position that women are in a position of lesser value or have fewer rights.
If we travel back in time to when most academics claim that the feminist movement was born, the 1960's, the motto for feminists at the time was much closer to the latter definition given here. At that time, they believed women were subjugated and men had more power.
There are several different kinds of feminism today. From extremist feminism to postmodern feminism. Extremist feminists self-admittedly believe that women have been put into a lesser position and need to fight for their equality. In short, the original feminists from the 1960's would have been extremist feminists. On the other hand, postmodern feminists today strongly stick to the former definition and the belief that both men and women suffer and that society needs to create equality between the two genders wherever possible.
However, there is a logical error here. The term feminism must have a root. All things with the word feminism in it must be related to each other in at least one, single, constant way. That is simply how terminology works.
When I research all of these different feminist movements, I can only find one consistency:
Patriarchy theory.
Patriarchy refers, in the simplest definition possible, to a society dominated by men. All feminist movements are based off of the idea that men have dominated society throughout history and women have been subjugated, and that women need to fight for their rights.
Now when you consider postmodern feminism into this equation, it doesn't add up does it? One cannot advocate for equal rights between men and women (including the idea that men suffer too) but at the same time believe men are in control.
If postmodern feminists fight for the rights of both men and women, why would they believe in a patriarchy? If both genders suffer, how could they still possibly believe in patriarchy theory?
Patriarchy theory would be totally irrelevant if men (who supposedly are in control) limit and harm themselves. In a way it is sexist because it assumes that men were the original creators of "limitations" and that the male sex is historically to blame for a society full of social norms and constructionism. If we look at women historically, or women in less educated countries today, they too have sexist beliefs. But according to feminists, these women are victims of the patriarchy. They are uneducated and have been controlled by the patriarchy (a society controlled by men). Is this not a bias?
As soon as postmodern feminists say that male gender roles are "also caused by the patriarchy", you know they have completely forgotten the meaning of the word "patriarchy" and do not see the sexist bias inherent in patriarchy theory.
If you research equalism, egalitarianism, and humanism, you will find that these ideologies truly fight for equality between men and women without making the baseless, sexist claim that men dominate and women are subjugated (patriarchy theory).
Instead, these ideologies admit that the differences between the way men and women have been treated in society cannot be objectively measured. It is not "obvious" that women are more mistreated that men or that men have had more power than women.
We could sit here all night firing off examples about how one gender is mistreated, but none of it would be objective and our scorecards would be limited by our imaginations. A problem is taken more seriously by one individual than it is for another. These "subjugations" are completely subjective and relative.
My point is that:
a) Patriarchy theory is sexist and false.
b) Postmodern feminists are making logical contradictions about their beliefs and how they label themselves.
c) If you call yourself a postmodern feminist, you are actually a sexist extremist feminist, or you are a confused equalist who should seriously consider my words.
Thanks for reading.