Ambition.

Following a few rules can keep business, relationship thriving

June 27, 2001|By Ellie Rubin, Universal Press Syndicate. Ellie Rubin is a syndicated business columnist, international speaker, author and co-founder of The Bulldog Group Inc.

The decision by couples to work together requires not only a long-term ambition and dream, but also an acknowledgement of the important journey along the way. Co-preneuring demands complementary skills and can be creatively and professionally exciting.

Sharing the highs and lows are part and parcel of building a business. Not surprisingly, any partnerships that stand the test of time are built on a set of rules and guidelines.

Here are a few:

Don't bring the business plan to bed: Especially when you are first building your business, it is often difficult not to "talk shop" all the time. The drafts of the business plans become objects of beauty, organizational charts are fascinating, and the personality quirks of your new bank manager are intriguing and scintillating. Enough so that you find yourself lying in bed reviewing every detail of the business you are building (even though you have already spent the entire dinner reviewing the same material).

How do you know you are in trouble? When one of you brings a copy of the business plan to bed and neither of you think that is a problem. Set limits on how much time is spent at home talking about business and agree that documents of any kind are not to enter the bedroom.

Rules of engagement: Often co-preneurs compete within their own companies. A certain level of competition is actually healthy and can be fun, but only if both parties agree to strict rules and guidelines ahead of time. Defining one's territory and having different people report to each of the co-preneurs are good ways to "divide and conquer" the demands of your growing business. Agree that it is OK to disagree on the process for achieving a given goal within each person's areas of responsibility as long as there is consensus on the final outcome. In setting these "rules of engagement" you save time and energy. They also enable both to grow into their roles without feeling hemmed in by their co-preneur's attempt to assert control or influence as a spouse or personal partner, rather than a business partner.

This is not a family business: Some co-preneurs specifically want to create a sense of family as part of the company culture. However, employees, customers and investors generally feel more comfortable if they perceive that they are working for an entrepreneurial business, and it just happens that two of the partners are actually part of the same family.

Why? First, in the area of employee relations, there will always come a time when you have to reprimand, fire or lay off your employees. If you have fostered a family, then these kinds of tough decisions that need to be made for business reasons can often get diluted, put off and/or bungled in an attempt to appease those who have become part of your extended family.

Second, if you maintain an air of "family," people may begin to act as if you were a mother/father team--getting decisions and approval from one co-preneur when it is not forthcoming from the other. Neither of these scenarios bode well for the maturation and healthy growth of a business that is, after all, not a family.