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Wednesday, October 26, 2016

What I Want for My Birthday This Year

My birthday is in two days. The hubs keeps asking me what I want.
I keep saying I'll think about it. There are a few things I would like. A cool
new Desire Map planner for next year. Some new crystals or oils. A new statue
for my space around the shed. Books, lots of books, you can never go wrong with books. Even a few things I need, like a new juicer or a
new massage table. I silently ask him in my head..."do you have any idea
what I would like for my birthday? What would put a smile on my face and in my
heart? I know you do if you think hard enough."

As I was cleaning up outside this morning (insert picking up dog
poop), I realized what I want for my birthday. It's a doozy (not like a presidential election do-over or immediate world peace doozy, but still), and I think he is
going to wish he would have just bought me something and quit asking.

I want our home to be a place of peace, comfort, encouragement and
support. I want it to serve as a haven for this little family of ours. Like a
bubble of unwavering light and love. So what does that mean? How can he give me
that? How can the boys wrap that one up for me and give it to me with pancakes
and coffee in bed on Friday?

Am I delusional to think that this is a possibility? A house with
a man, 2 boys, 2 dogs, a frog, a turtle and me. There is constant activity
within these walls. Lots of noise, lots of banging, and just pretty much a
steady stream of kids in and out. It's a small place, we don't have a ton of
room. Things are stashed in every nook and cranny. There is always dog hair and
dirt from outside on the hard wood floor and dirty finger smudges on the trim
around the doors. Dishes and laundry are always needing to be done and dusting
doesn't happen enough.

But I think, the most important thing in the house is the vibe.
The feeling you get when you are in it. Do you walk in and feel relaxed or
tense? Do you walk in to a place that smells like home and that puts a little
warm ball of contentment in your chest? Do you move around the space feeling free
yet supported? Unhindered? Or do you feel tied down or boxed up? Do you feel
open? Free to say what you want to say or sing what you want to sing. Free to
speak your mind without getting told to quit talking? Free to share your dreams
without getting judged or made to feel that those dreams are silly or
unattainable. Do you feel like the people here support you to take chances and
be unique?

The vibe is the energy right? The energy from the people in the
house. The energy they bring in after a tough day. The energy that gets shared
when someone is excited about a new idea. The energy that permeates like fog
when there is discontent or unspoken frustration. The energy that lights up
everyone in the space when someone feels completely and truly loved for who
they are at that moment.

The vibe doesn't lie. You can't have a pretty house with a yucky
energy and still have a pleasant vibe. The vibe is what it is, and it is
directly due to the energy brought to the space, and held in the space, and fed
in the space.

So I want our vibe to be high! I want our vibe to be joyful yet
soothing. I want our vibe to allow for mistakes and learning. I want our vibe
to encourage growth, taking risks, and living each day to the fullest. I want
our vibe to be filled with unconditional, unwavering, constant love and kindness.
I want there to be honest open communication and void of passive aggressive comments.

I want each of us to be free to do the things that keep us healthy
and make us happy, without feeling guilty, or like we are burdening the rest of
the tribe.

Each one of us, being whole, and who we are meant to be.

Loved and accepted fully.

Respected.

Cherished.

Celebrated for our own uniqueness.

I want each of us to be responsible for our health. Our physical
health, our mental health and our spiritual health. For our vibe to encourage
health in all of these areas.

I want us to be a team. A
team that enjoys time together and allows for time apart. A team that feeds one
another the good stuff. The stuff that builds up. The stuff that makes
stronger. The stuff that makes hearts and minds healthy, happy and free.

So, this high vibe business takes work. It takes reflection and patience. It takes thoughtful choices and discussions. It takes honesty and vulnerability. It requires letting go and facing fears. It asks us to allow for failure and to even be grateful for it if, and when, it comes. It requires tears and hugs and quiet time. It's fed by nature, breath, faith and compassion.

Probably woulda been easier to ask for a gift card huh? Haahaa!
Good things...really amazing, awesome things, are rarely easy.

Makes my heart happy that you stopped by. I hope you find something that speaks to you here. Something that talks to your heart and resonates with your soul. I hope you will find a little encouragement, a lot of truth, some strength in knowing you aren't alone and never will be.You may also enjoy some occasional cussing, and a giggle here or there.
With love, Trisha