When we’re promoted to a position of a manager, we’re expected to lead a team of people. And whilst we’re very skilled at our job, it can be hard to suddenly pick up the skills to be a leader.

Being a great leader is something we can all learn to be, because leadership has very little do with whether we’re extroverted or introverted or whether we’re popular or not. Here are three skills we can cultivate that can help us lead a great team:

The team has to feel like you’ve got their back.

Having your team’s back doesn’t mean that you excuse bad behaviour. We need to always let someone know the consequences of their actions, but in private. It mean we don’t ever put them down or tell them off in front of other people. Your team is your responsibility, so their mistakes, are in a big way, your mistakes. And when your team sees you taking the fire for something they’ve done, they’ll automatically feel responsible without you even needing to tell them in many words. For any relationship to thrive, there has to be trust. If your team trusts you to have their back, half the battle is won.

2. The team has to feel like you’re someone they want to emulate.

Maybe your team doesn’t want to be you, but it really helps as a leader to have many traits that your team wants to emulate. A good leader is aspirational not just in status but also in personal characteristics. If you’re not able to consistently rise above your negative emotions and show them that you handle problems in a calm and rational manner, your team won’t feel inspired to listen to you.

3. The team has to feel like you’re someone who can help them.

So many of us feel like we have to be friends with the people we work with, but that’s a personal preference. What your team needs is not a friend, but a mentor who can help them be better. How can you help them improve in areas that they’re not confident at? Different people have different values and goals, and if you can help them achieve those at work, you’ll have a team who is loyal and motivated to strive.

This sounds like a lot of work, but it’s you helping yourself in the end. When we help people help themselves, we’re creating value beyond just telling people what to do and building a team that can come to work and be happy, always.