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Ask the Sexpert: One Size Doesn’t Fit All

Welcome to Ask the Sexpert! This blog series focuses on sex, sexuality, and relationships. Read on for BU Sexperts Sophie Godley and Dr. Teri Aronowitz’s honest, truthful answers to students’ scandalous questions.

Dear Sophie,

Some guys insist that they need larger condoms, but I’ve heard that they can fall off during sex if he doesn’t really need them. How can I handle my safety and his ego?

-ONE SIZE DOESN’T FIT ALL

Dear ONE SIZE,

Luckily for everyone, condoms come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Condoms absolutely do differ in “fit,” including length and circumference. It’s important for both sex partners (and I mean all kinds of partners – men having sex with men and women having sex with men) that condoms fit correctly and are being used correctly. Another key element to condom success – meaning that the condom stays on and doesn’t interfere with either partner – is lubricant. Water-based lubricants are sold at local drugstores (conveniently they are usually located near the condoms!) and can make a big difference for everyone’s comfort.

There are a few great resources for finding and trying out new condoms. Check out Condomania, a store in NYC that does mail order, or locally you can visit Good Vibrations in Brookline to see what types of condoms and lube are available.

As for supporting your partner’s ego, maybe you can promise to help him try on different condoms until you find the right fit!

Sophie Godley is a Clinical Assistant Professor at the Boston University School of Public Health. She has been working in the field of sexual health and adolescent health for over fifteen years. Sophie believes being sexually healthy is part of being a healthy human.

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