A love letter: To all the tired mamas everywhere

I love how you don’t even have to open your eyes to roll over in bed and open the blanket to that kid who has bad dreams.

I love how you worry about Kindergarten homework and teach yourself calculus all over again to keep up with your teen. I love how you swing babies up onto hips and prop them on check out counters or grocery carts or changing tables in desperately-too-small bathroom stalls.

I love how you balance your bags and that car seat carrier, the extra bottle, someone’s baseball helmet, the picnic blanket and still remember to pack the one lovie no one can live without.

I love how you see magic in passing fire trucks and roll down the windows so everyone can wave at the train crossing.

I love how planning a first visit from the tooth fairy keeps you up at night and involves scraping glitter off old Christmas ornaments or how by tooth number 45 you still manage to finagle some mystery into the quarter that showed up even if it was two days late.

I love how you can keep up a conversation with a friend while simultaneously entertaining two toddlers. How you can pour pretend tea party tea into tiny porcelain cups while pouring out your heart and plans for next year and that farm house you just moved into. I love that you don’t even notice that Winnie the Pooh is singing in the background because you’re so focused on listening to another mama.

I love how you wear macaroni necklaces with the sparkly earrings your husband gave you on your 15th anniversary.

I love how your cubicle at work is decorated with frames made from popsicle sticks and faces grinning out at you alongside the 5 goals your team has committed to this quarter.

I love how your car plays equal selections of The Wiggles and The Beatles and you all know all the words to both.

I love how you know who likes the red bowl and who likes the blue bowl and I love that you care about that difference.

I love how even when you’re so tired that you’ve forgotten your bangs are clipped backwards with a Dora bobby pin, you still pause in the door way to watch them sleep.

I love that you can tell who snores and who snuffles and who will need water at almost midnight exactly every single night.

I love that you know the names of all the super heroes and what each of their super powers is.

I love that you play princess dress up in your wedding dress and a tiny Tinkerbell wand.

I love that you pause to kiss pint-size princes.

I love that you understand how to score an in-home wrestling match and that you aren’t afraid to climb into the thick of it. I love that you’re undefeated.

I love that you make late night ice cream runs and early morning waffles covered in everything unhealthy under the sun.

I love that you say yes and I love even more the strength you have to say, no.

I love that in the back of your closet you’re still holding onto one or two teeny tiny memories that your waist has of a time before you had kids.

I love that today you’re wearing their high school sweat shirt instead.

I love that you laugh. I hope you know you are always still loved when you cry.

I love that you keep getting up to the same routine every day and somehow manage to make it a different memory by each night.

I love that you fold laundry while forgetting to change the Disney channel.

I love that you research questions like “How to get Desitin off the carpet” or “How bats navigate” or “What to feed a baby bird.”

I love that you wake up at night wondering how you could possibly love them more?

I love that you don’t want them to change and that you celebrate each new milestone they arrive at anyway.

I love that you’ve lost the ability to be embarrassed and have embraced the destiny of the unexpected.

I love that you now live in a house instead of a museum, that you have a rating system for the pain of stepping on Legos and still fight the good fight to get them to put the toilet seat down.

I love that you consider mac ‘n cheese a food group.

I love that you will protect these children even from yourself if you have to.

I love that you are undaunted, immovable and unafraid. Even on the days you are terrified.

I love that you give brave a face. I love that compassion aches out of you. I love that you wear empathy along with the lip gloss she applied. I love that you sing off key because they love your voice and that your body is built for the all out, full out, art of the monkey hug.

I love that when you feel empty and desperate and spent, you still take one more step.

Thank you! So nice to see that based on your description of so many aspects of my own mothering experience, that I am not alone in this journey. This raising of beautiful souls God has entrusted to me is an awesome responsibility and one that I don’t take lightly. But it always helps to know there are others experiencing the same highs, lows and in-betweens. Love… <3

Tracy H
on January 16, 2014 at 9:59 am

Thank you, Lisa-Jo! I had forgotten that I did all those things. I still feel like I haven’t done enough – enough quiet times with my boy, enough tobogganing, enough tutoring, enough museum visits, enough mad painting sprees. Despite a back injury that prevents me from skateboarding and ice skating, I feel bad about this too. I feel bad about not being the prettiest or a younger mom, I feel bad about ungroomed nails and hair. I feel bad about so many things undone that I forget how much I really do. You are a blessing today!

Rhonda Bradshaw
on January 16, 2014 at 10:16 am

That as we pour out our love for our kids, we look for the same love and validation from our Abba Daddy. We are the adult children of a Heavenly Father that knows the exact number of gray hairs on our head and the feathers of the sparrow that falls. Bless you Lady.

I love that you write to all Mama’s everywhere – in every season – and give us hope! Yes… I love that – and you – oh so much!

Ali
on January 16, 2014 at 3:36 pm

I needed this today. Just beautiful. Thank you

Rebekah Mathers
on January 16, 2014 at 3:44 pm

I love this, thank you :)

Jenn
on January 16, 2014 at 5:56 pm

Thank you for this! With a 2 year old boy and one in the way, I am truly one tired mama!

Jen
on January 16, 2014 at 8:58 pm

wonderful uplifting and so true.. I have 3 kiddos and that was really .. great

Cari
on January 16, 2014 at 9:47 pm

I wanted to thank you for this at 7am when I started reading it while eating cereal, ironing a school uniform, showering, feeding two breakfast (in the correct bowls) and the newest little one a bottle, warming up the car and getting all 4 of us out the door. But I hadn’t finished reading yet. Amidst my day (week three with now 3 kids) I would read another line or two and smile, and tear up. So now at nearly 10pm with baby boy falling asleep on my chest, I finished reading your post. And I want to thank you for the love letter. Thank you for recognizing all the things others don’t see, things we don’t even realize. Thank you from this very.tired.mama.

Lisa-Jo
on January 16, 2014 at 11:52 pm

…and now here I am at nearly midnight reading your comment and it feels like unwrapping a gift – from one tired mama to another, just thank you.

Charlene
on January 16, 2014 at 10:55 pm

This was amazing! Thank you for sharing. Your words were beautiful

Tina
on January 17, 2014 at 12:13 am

My gosh I so needed this today! I just posted in FB about how it’s been one of those days where I am not sure if being a mom was the right decision. I think tomorrow I am going to do nothing but play!

Tiffany
on January 17, 2014 at 12:57 am

I love that you take the time to remind us all…of all of these reasons…to take one more step.

Um, so I just started sobbing a little bit — mostly tears that are happy and grateful and tired. Thank you. Thank you for validating that all the little things that I THINK are important (red bowl vs. blue, tooth fairy magic) really are.

Thank you for seeing us and loving us. We know this letter is about you, too, and love you for it as well. :)

absolutely love this! going to share it on my blog, this is something e v e r y o n e should read! I laughed while reading this because in the middle of reading i had to stop to my help 2 yr old find a little blue rock that she is using in her pretend soup; took a good 5 minutes – she was sitting on it! Hahahaha. Oh and side note, her and i are sharing a bowl of mac n cheese right now :)

Amy
on January 19, 2014 at 9:23 pm

Thank you. :) You always have a way of cheering us up!!!! We love u too! :)

Dina
on January 20, 2014 at 4:22 pm

Thank you thank you thank you!!!! Feeling overwhelmed and unappreciated this words came to me at the perfect time!!!

Marie-Eve
on January 21, 2014 at 9:02 am

Wow! Really needed that this morning after a night of being up with a sick 5 year old and being too exhausted to take care of the 3 year old this morning. THANKS!

Denise Jordan
on January 21, 2014 at 11:11 am

Thank you so very much for such a touching post. My children are now 20 years old and sometimes because of time, distance, and more so….life, it seems as if all of these memories and moments have passed oh so quickly. Its hard to see how blessed you truly are when you are going through these motions, but believe me, when your children are grown, and life slows down, and the silence in your house gets so loud…..you’ll remember that every single moment that has gotten you to this point, wasn’t just a moment in time but a blessed memory that will last and live within your heart-FOREVER!

LiveAloha
on January 22, 2014 at 6:12 pm

I needed that today. Especially a day like today, in which I have meetings that will turn into a 12 hour work day, all in the name of love and providing for my girls. When I’m overrun with guilt because I’m sitting in a 4 hour long meeting when I should have been home 3 hours ago, and the only thing I want to do in the whole world is be back home playing puzzles with my toddler (2.5yr) and cuddling with my smiley baby (6mo). Knowing that I go to work every day and despite getting yelled at by clients, run all over the place creating solutions for issues I never anticipated, writing endless reports, all awhile keeping a diplomatic demeanor, that I do it all so that my sweet girls can go to college and not want or need for anything. So that I can show them that if they put their minds to something, they can do absolutely anything on this planet they want to do, as long as they do it with pride and integrity. My hope is that they can see their mom achieve success, but never fail to put them first. My girls are my heart and soul, and I desperately needed to read this today.

Jen
on February 7, 2014 at 4:10 pm

Thank you for this inspiration. As a white mama of a brown child, I couldn’t help but notice, however, that there were no beautiful mamas of color represented.

rina
on February 11, 2014 at 1:53 pm

I had the exact same thought… at first, I was so happy to see photos of mammas like me (white with brown baby), then realized there were no all-brown families… and I know they need your love too! Great post…

TookItThere
on February 8, 2014 at 3:22 pm

I would have loved seeing at least one picture of a non-white mother holding one of those non-white children in this post. Otherwise, great post!

Nancy
on February 10, 2014 at 6:53 am

I don’t know you but I feel like you just acknowledged everything I work so hard to make sure gets done but don’t even notice myself that I do because I wouldn’t ever NOT do those things. Thank you so much for putting your heart into this love letter and know that it hit another mama right where it needed to this morning.

Allison
on February 10, 2014 at 5:00 pm

Thank you. You just made me feel so understood and appreciated. So well written. Love it! Thank you.