The mighty phoenix is a strong, firm, and powerful mascot to thrust onto the field, but some parents at Farmington High School in Utah don’t think phoenices should be running around where all the kids can see.

Salacious images are lurking in even the most G-rated of content these days. Be careful, or your poor child might be subjected something like what viewers of Netflix’s Maya the Bee experienced: seeing an outline drawing of a peen.

Because life is suffering and joy is where you find it, I want to just take a moment to salute the selective-to-the-point-of-being-nonsensical capitalization that’s been happening in headlines on the website of the UK paper The Daily Mail. While the Mail needs no help achieving ridiculousness, these headlines push the…

Jacques “Porkchop” Rouschop is a Canadian man being held on charges of sexual assault in Ottawa. On Thursday, his attorney, Natasha Calvinho, submitted a new defense, claiming his penis was simply too small for him to have committed the crime.

When my grandfather was a young boy, he fled his home in Vienna to escape the Holocaust and arrived in New York City with not much more than his wood fiber pants, which had comically shrunken after getting soaked with salt water on the trip over. He would learn English, join the U.S. Army, earn his B.A. and Ph.D. in…

The Affair, an excellent show about the nuances and complications of infidelity and self-identity interspersed with fuckloads of sex scenes, commenced its second season last night, expanding its two-person perspective to four by including the viewpoints of spurned spouses Helen and Cole.

Don’t call it a comeback. Andrew Wardle of Greater Manchester is 40 years old, has had a girlfriend for the last three years, and was born with an abnormality that left him with an external bladder and a missing penis.

The campaign is titled Penis Can Surprise You and can only be described as “modern avant-garde creepy-as-fuck.” But what else can you do to get noticed, asks a Norway sexual health charity, when the people who most need your advertisement about chlamydia aren’t paying attention to more traditional forms of public…

If anyone knows of a micropeen whose dream is to sashay around on a stage, showing off their goods or lack thereof, the Smallest Penis in Brooklyn Pageant is looking for eligible contestants for its third annual competition. In a society where gigantic meat cannons are the ones usually celebrated, the pageant is a…

Men who have small penises are prone to anxiety about their body image and their performance. That's why a Yorkshire poet by the name of Ant Smith is throwing a party to celebrate tiny peens of all shapes and sizes. He's charging people admission based on their length—the shorter the dick, the smaller the entry fee.

Being a teen isn't easy; being a teen with a giant penis and unexpected instances of priapism? Well, that's just downright hellacious. For an unnamed teen, every day with a giant penis was a nightmare, preventing him from wearing pants or doing everyday activities. So he got it cut down.

We've already introduced you to the Danish man who used his dong to create a rather striking imitation of Kim Kardashian's butt-baring Paper cover. Well, here's another man, an Australian who wears a giant pink top hat, calls himself "Pricasso" and yes, also paints with his dick. Gotta say, his style isn't quite so…

It goes "snippity, snippity, snippity snop" and you will never be able to get it out of your head. Not even when you learn that the translated lyrics are: "The vagina is cool, you better believe it, even on an old lady. It just sits there so elegantly."

I don't know you, but I have no doubt you've got self-improvement goals on the docket for 2015. One you may have overlooked while busy going off sugar or increasing overall beauty by 12 to 18 percent is the fact that your vagina is aging faster than you can say cascading wizard sleeve. What to do?