Monday, 30 September 2013

I've got a new story appearing on the Erotica Readers and Writers Association website. It's called 'Dissolve.' All the ERWA stories are Halloween-themed this month, so they're supposed to be dark, supernatural or scary. I wrote this one specifically for the theme. I don't know whether it will frighten anyone else, but it sure scared me. I was working on it at night, alone in my bedroom, heard a noise somewhere out in the house. Shit. Do I go and investigate or just sit here frozen in sweaty-palmed terror? Note to self: don't write any more scary stories, but if you do, make sure you do it when someone else is home.

Also, I ran across this old article about a marriage enrichment retreat on Salon. It didn't turn out exactly like the marriage enrichment retreat in 'Mesmerized,' but there were some striking similarities.

Sunday, 29 September 2013

Shameless Behavior: Brazen Stories of Overcoming Shame is out at last! It came out a couple of days earlier than I expected, actually.

I celebrated by downloading it and spending the day reading the whole thing. My favorite stories in it are 'Tamar,' 'Twin Scars' and 'Wet.' 'Tamar,' by Daniel Burnell, has a unique voice and lovely, transcendent imagery. 'Twin Scars,' by Axa Lee, perfectly captures the effect on a woman's sexuality of pregnancy, childbirth, and loss. 'Wet,' by Kyoko Church, confronts the pain suffered by a woman when a lover is disgusted by her body, and the confusion, hesitation, and ultimate healing when a new lover is aroused by the same (supposed) flaw. There are lots of other good stories in there. It's definitely worth the wait.

Sunday, 22 September 2013

At last we have a release date for Shameless Behavior. September 30! That's less than a week away, and I can't wait. Excerpts from the stories are being published on the Go Deeper Press blog, so if you want previews, you should go check it out.

Also on September 30, my stories 'A Wanted Man' and 'Changement' will disappear from the Erotica Readers and Writers website. 'A Wanted Man' is the best story I've ever written. I'll be sad when it disappears from the web, and I hope it finds a new home someday. (Yes, I know that writers are supposed to be the worst judges of their own work, but I really poured my heart into that one.)

Friday, 13 September 2013

Someone claiming to be a group of male
University of Vermont students posted an ad to Craigslist seeking a "HouseMILF."

We are a house of 10 men who all are seniors at
UVM and are looking for an attractive older woman to come and cook for us every
few days. In exchange she gets her pick of the men of the house to have.

Requirements aren't lengthy; be a woman older
than 25 who can cook and would like to enjoy some hot sex with a
number of fit 20 somethings. Hopefully you can come by every week for a meal
and some play time. Obviously we can work to accommodate your schedule. ;)

We
are located in Burlington, are a fun and clean group of guys, and are all 21+.

Pretty funny, right? Except that someone
was offended enough to call the police, who investigated the ad as
"possible solicitation." The police weren't able to find out who
posted the ad, but they did determine that it was NOT a crime. Yes, justice prevailed, and the police aren't going to need to start bringing prostitution charges against every woman who has sex with a guy who buys her dinner.

Check out this response to the incident by
Laurie Essig, a professor of gender studies.

I'd like to analyse a few choice comments
from her post.

Essig: "Needless to say, they didn't
get a lot of attention from the MILFs in Burlington …"

How, exactly, does Essig know whether or
not the young men got many responses to their ad? As I noted above, the police
weren't able to determine who posted the ad, because Craigslist doesn't release
posters' identities. Ah, I get it. She wants
to believe that no women would be interested in the young men's offer.
Hilariously, however, several older women commented on Essig's post to say they
found the idea quite appealing.

Essig: "I'm not trying to make light
of the symbolic violence contained in the fraternity brothers' ad. All men who
have mothers should know better than to talk about MILFs. And no men should
imagine that women are here on earth to fulfill their needs, whether it's in
the kitchen or in the bedroom."

Symbolic violence? How, exactly, was Essig
able to extrapolate symbolic violence from an offer of consensual sex? Oh, I
know. It's because the person(s) who posted the ad are (allegedly) men. In the
minds of Essig's brand of feminism, male sexuality is violent by definition.

"These young men have probably been
consuming MILF porn, with its images of somewhat older women who seem to take
great pleasure in servicing the needs of men. This porn is fantasy and surely
everyone but these young men understands that, but it is fantasy in the service
of patriarchy."

Now this statement is really interesting. Clearly,
Essig's assumption is that any woman having sex with a man is 'servicing' him.
Somehow she missed the fact that the young men are offering sex in exchange for
food.

Would Essig have had so much trouble
understanding the ad if it had been posted by college women? Here's
the ad again, identical except that the pronouns have been reversed.

We are a house of 10 women who all are seniors
at UVM and are looking for an attractive older man to come and cook for us
every few days. In exchange he gets his pick of the women of the house to have.

Requirements aren't lengthy; be a man older
than 25 who can cook and would like to enjoy some hot sex with a
number of fit 20 somethings. Hopefully you can come by every week for a meal
and some play time. Obviously we can work to accommodate your schedule. ;)

We
are located in Burlington, are a fun and clean group of girls, and are all 21+.

Would Essig have found any 'symbolic
violence' in this ad? My guess is that she would have, and she would have thought
the victims were the poor little college women, who had been exposed to so much
objectification that they were willing to sexually degrade themselves in
exchange for a hot meal. Double standard, much?

It's all pretty depressing. But check out some of the comments on Essig's post.

"forgive the menopausal harmones,
wouldn't mind taking those boys up on their offer, if only for a few evenings.
Young and hard, wow...."

"Everybody buys sexhusbands, wives, boyfriends,
girlfriends SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME. It is the human condition. If these
beautiful young men would like some home cooked gravy, spaghetti and meatballs
for a long hard one, well with some wine it sounds like an interesting evening.
Maybe bring some lube so we can keep things comfortable, I don't see the
problem."

"And another thing: not all older
women are SHOCKED by the idea of being desired by college students. We're not
all out for love and marriage and being socially acceptable. It's pretty
patronising to assume that any woman who would take this offer up is a victim.
I'm getting tired of this idea that women are supposed to be the moral
gatekeepers to ward off sex-crazed men."

That's right, Essig! As distasteful as you
may find it, some older women enjoy having sex with men. Now that they've been
cleared by the police, I hope those young men have found a nice house MILF and
they're enjoying some home-cooking and fun.