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There’s wonderful and terrible news in the beaver world this morning and I don’t want you to miss any of it. Let’s get the dirty work outta the way before we settle down to enjoy ourselves. Brace yourselves, these are the first two lines of the article:

A notice was recently sent to tenants living at Hampton Forest Apartment warning if they heard gunshots not to call the police. The complex is fighting to keep its property safe from a colony of beavers.

Got that? If you hear gunshots, screaming and breaking pottery coming from the living room don’t call the police. I’m just fixing a marital problem. Okay, then. I’m glad the Hampton Forest Apartment has tried Every Other possible solution for resolving this conflict. I mean first destroying their homes and dams, then hiring a trapper and only now when all other murderous options have been employed turning to the fearless sharpshooter.

Two non-deadly tools for reducing beaver damage without removing the animal is a water control device. It helps maintain the flow of water. Another option is using wire barriers to protection against gnawing.

Remember, here at beaver central we’re grading on a curve and this is South Carolina so the fact that this sentence made it into the article is sorta amazing.

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Now because it’s that time of year and you’ve all been very good, check out this Recovery Plan for the Central Coast Coho put forth by our good friends at NOAA (and you can bet the California part was heavily influenced by this year’s winner of the Golden Pipe Award, Brock Dolman!)