Christmas seems to get longer every year. I noticed that shopping-channel BidTV started flogging Christmas decorations in September... As the build-up gets bigger and bigger, by the time it eventually comes around, the intensity is so excessive that it could never be as good as you'd hoped.

This is not the sort of conversation I thought I'd be having with Mr Creosote, but Terry Jones has always been a curious brew of erudition and surrealism, one or the other creeping out depending on his mood.