Sure, as a new parent, you’re rightfully stoked at learning the life-changing news you’ve been blessed with. But outside of your family and closest friends, face it – nobody cares about whether you’re having a boy or a girl.

When it comes to gender-reveal ceremonies that involve pink or blue powder-filled balls and a bat, there’s just no upside.

If things go accordingly, a handful of people in your inner circle will witness the spectacle, smile and move on with their days. But when things go wrong, as they often do, the internet will take notice. And the internet will laugh at you.

First, this was clearly not practiced. Don’t attempt to perform feats of skill in a public setting without taking a few hacks in the backyard first.

Second. Put down the child that you already have! Holding a toddler on the edge of a busy Chicago street while focusing your attention on throwing a ball seems a formula for a much worse outcome than a botched gender reveal, which fortunately is all that happened here.

The only solace for these Cubs fans is that they have competition for the internet’s current most-mocked gender reveal thanks to this happy couple.

Also, while we’re on the subject, technically these are not gender reveals. The biological sex of the baby is being revealed, so they’re really sex reveals, if we want to be accurate about what’s happening. But that opens an entirely new can of worms.