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Monday, May 20, 2013

Human Error

If there is an award for a teaser that contains nothing of significance, might not Seven of Nine pensively playing the piano alone be a finalist? Aren't you interested in keeping us interested?

Some jerks built an invisible minefield and included a warning sign written in invisible space ink. Again I say, JERKS. Voyager, of course, blunders through it and things go "boom".

Speaking of things that appear suddenly and without warning out of the blue, Seven has a crush on Chakotay now! The very guy who blew her Borg focus group into space and tried to do the same to her. Seven programs herself a little holographic version of the first officer to practice boyfriending on.
Sure. he's handsome! But why didn't she express any interest earlier, say- when she studied the crew manifest looking for someone to date TWO YEARS AGO?

If Seven is so clueless about humanity, how can the social scenarios she wrote feature everyone else acting NORMALLY and giving sound advice on topics Seven doesn't understand? How does Seven know that Neelix would yammer on about carpets matching drapes? Seven can't even sound casual asking the real Torres for grooming tips! Or is this the main computer autonomously using personal files to make this stuff up?

Not only is the ex-drone avoiding work, she's also not regenerating in favour of her fantasy, until she gets sick. Worst of all, her vitally necessary, non-removable cortical node has the NEVER-BEFORE-MENTIONED feature of shutting her down if she has a strong feeling! Yes, it chaps my ass. This didn't happen to ANY OTHER ex-drone; from rage-fueled Lansor, Marika, and P'Chan, to passionate Frazier, from stalwart Hugh to ever-lovin' Locutus. "THIS FAH! NO FURTHA! Urrggh..." Picard faints.

So... Seven's quest for humanity was apparently ALWAYS doomed to failure. Nice one, writers. "Gawrsh, I'd like me a pretty horny girl with no feelings! That'd be the best! Hyuk!"

"Human Error" is a big disappointment, and reviewer Michelle Green puts it a lot better than I can. Quick, the series is ending! Throw some couple together so we give the illusion of growth and change... you know, like when Worf and Troi hit it off so famously and so well.