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Truths About Thanksgiving

Some little known facts about Thanksgiving:

1. Actually originated in the mid-14 century Latvia where it was called mems brigdienu.

2. The first American Thanksgiving meal was not turkey. It was soup. Anecdotal evidence suggests it was butternut squash.

3. Canadians also have Thanksgiving, in October, to celebrate the overthrow of tyrannical Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau.

4. The Dollar Store was recently in negotiations to purchase the Macy’s Day Parade but when NBC balked at the cost of re-branding their television spectacular, The Dollar Store walked away. Negotiations are ongoing.

5. Since 1936, the Detroit Lions have been secretly begging the NFL not to play on Thanksgiving, current NFL Commissioner Roger Goddell, committed to tradition (and the millions of dollars in ad revenue) refuses.

6. Turkey that is imported from Afghanistan does not contain the natural tryptophan that makes you sleepy, it actually contains heroin.

7. Retail stores have done the impossible and broken the time space continuum and for two days only, Friday actually takes place on Thursday.

8. The Macy’s Day Parade ended at the corner of Wall St. and Greene St. until 1942.

9. In Duluth, Minnesota a city ordinance mandates that Chicken must be eaten on Thanksgiving and not Turkey. Eating Turkey may result in a $50 fine.

10. Over indulging on Thanksgiving was a coordinated cross marketing campaign between Aldophus Busch and Ada Walker at the beginning of the Temperance movement.

11. Millions of people won’t be as lucky as you are today so be sure to give thanks for the people in your life…unless you really don’t like the people in your life, in which case, you might want to re-evaluate some things.