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About Me

In case any of my friends or family members actually read this Blog, please consider all Names, Characters, Places and Incidents to be the product of the author's imagination and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are entirely COINCIDENTAL...Muaaah!!
Now, really, about me: I bring the crazy wherever I go, so I've been told...I make fun of myself more than anyone else ever could.
I hate: the awkward silence in elevators, watches with no numbers, picky eaters, Cancer and legalism. I love: coffee, stalking Hugh Jackman, my Spanx, COMMENTS, sarcasm and writing: Middle Grade, NA, YA Paranormal and Urban Fantasy.

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Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Blinking Icons- Insecure Writer's Support Group

Today is the first Wednesday of the month, which means it's time for another meeting of the IWSG. To find out what this group is all about or to join in all of the insecure fun and games, check out Ninja Captain Alex's site or the IWSG Facebook page for more information.

I have been sitting here for what seems like a century, watching that blinking icon flash on and off and on and off the screen, in a bit of a trance. One second it's there and then the next, it's gone. Kind of like my thoughts. Oh, I have brilliant flashes and moments of sheer genius while writing. My fingers will fly over the keys pounding out my characters, dialogue, plot and building worlds. When this burst of creativity happens, I can barely contain myself. My joy is complete in my creation. But for some reason, my insecurity will creep up on me and that creative light will dim. My positive feelings and enthusiasm for my work will come to a grinding halt. My mind gets stuck in that disappearing phase of the icon. And I'm gone.

I struggle to find that connection, that spark again. Instead of fighting through it, I have this destructive tendency to pull into my shell, totally clam up and refuse to share what I'm working on with anyone else. I convince myself that it's all crap and not worth anyone else's time. Why would other people connect with my characters when they are all one dimensional and flat? I've been stuck in these starts and stops for quite a while now. How can I convince myself to push past my insecurities and find the strength to press on? Do any of you suffer from blinking icons? Flashes of pure brilliance and clarity one day, and the next, all goes dark?

For me, it doesn't even have to happen day to day. It could be hour to hour or minute to minute. It's so hard, and I think this is the key that makes a true writer, pushing past the crap and insecurities and doing it anyway. You will always struggle, but you will also always succeed. Hang in there, Jaybird!

The best thing to do when you have those moments is remember that everyone has them. Now, whether it's better to push your way through and write something, anything, until the spark comes back, or to take a break from it, depends on you. Different things work better for different people at different times.Also, I've met some of your characters and they are wonderful! You have an amazing voice, Jaybird. A recognizable, this is you, sort of voice. So don't let yourself get down for long!

That's the great thing about perspective....everyone's is different. Things I've thought were crap, others have told me how much they've enjoyed it. Keep plugging away and, remember, many of us are out there, plugging away with you :)

I have those moments all the time. I've had to grit my teeth and just continue. It's hard to push through thouse moments but I'm sure you can do it. It's great to get someone else's perspective as well. They could see something you missed and help better round your character or story.

I have those insecurities. Some days, you just have to remind yourself that you are doing it for the love. Forget the glory, forget the cash...you will write because you love to write. And if no one recognizes the brilliance of those works until you are found dead, penniless and drunk in a gutter...so be it. (Just watched The Raven...Poe was fresh on the brain!)

Isn't it nice to know you are not alone. Just read a great book called "The War of Art by Steven Pressfield. Basically he talks about resistance which is my greatest enemy. It's a short little book but I understood what he was saying about any project and being bogged down. Usually I don't recommend books but I actually learned more about me and the way I write (or don't) from him than anyone else.