Saturday, 18 February 2012

When the cat's away...

Imagine my outright horror to return from a wonderfully relaxing holiday in Cape Town to find a delivery of Ikea furniture had been made. More precisely, a disgusting, mint-green two-seater sofa.Apparently, it was a present from a Great Aunt.

I can tell you I was consumed by murderous rage to find this disgusting item of Ikea furniture in my banquet hall. It is the sort of furniture one finds in council-run seaside nursing homes. I didn't ask for it. It is an unwanted gift, a crude object, one of loathsome distaste.Needless to say, it did not stay in the above condition for very long.

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About Me

My name is Fanny Love. Described by the media as "like Alice in Wonderland, on acid",
I'm a Texan-born transvestite, who also happens to be a part-time super model, celebrated authoress and occasional shoplifter. I adore the company of beautiful young men at my isolated country estate in the English countryside. Join me on my unorthodox travels around little England, accompanied by Juan (my pin-up Brazilian chauffeur) and my two adorable dogs, Mr. Puffywuffycutesweetgummywummygumdrop (a rainbow-dyed poodle) and Brenda (a 3-year old Doberman bitch with an obsession about red stilettos).