Driving my inebriated husband home from a New Years' party last week, we passed a large store with apparently defunct lights in their name.

"Look!" gurgled DH. "It's the Burlinto Cat Factory!"

I about drove off the road.

*Disclaimer- I was dead sober, for anyone about to yell at me. I just found it hilarious*

In the strip mall where my hair salon is, there's also an Armed Forces Recruiting Center. For a long time the last seven letters in "Recruiting" were burned out, so it read "Armed Forces Rec Center." I had this image of young guys stopping in for a game of pool and getting the hard-sell to join up.

Speaking of burned-out signs, my BF, BFF and I recently drove past a Citizens Bank that had some letters burned out, so it read "zen Bank." All I could think of was the second punchline to the Dalai Lama and the hot-dog vendor joke: "Change comes from within."

In the strip mall where my hair salon is, there's also an Armed Forces Recruiting Center. For a long time the last seven letters in "Recruiting" were burned out, so it read "Armed Forces Rec Center." I had this image of young guys stopping in for a game of pool and getting the hard-sell to join up.

Speaking of burned-out signs, my BF, BFF and I recently drove past a Citizens Bank that had some letters burned out, so it read "zen Bank." All I could think of was the second punchline to the Dalai Lama and the hot-dog vendor joke: "Change comes from within."

My mom and sister drove past a Big K-mart where part of the lights on the "B" were burned out.The sign at night read, "Pig K". Sis used to work at a K-mart. She just about died laughing.

lamorevincera

On the way to my bachelorette party, my friends went past an Ace Hardware that had the following sign:

"Free Butt Rub With Green Egg"

When they got to the party, we all discussed it and figured it out. Apparently a "green egg" has something to do with a grill, and "butt rub" is BBQ seasoning for meat.

Cracked us up for a while, though.

Another friend told me a story from when she was a teenager. Another friend of hers had gotten fired from a small drycleaner's, and begged my friend to come help her get revenge. (Right after the firing, they'd put up a sign that said "Mature help wanted") Friend's friend decided to have a little fun with that, and roped my friend into climbing on top of her truck at 4 AM and rearranging the sign to say "Help! Mad Turtle!" (They couldn't come up with anything else.) lol

Apparently the roads in our area are unusually active in a certain way, judging by the number of signs that say "Road Humps".

Just keep it off my leg, would you?

I remember when my Hometown first put in a few of those type of speed bump, along with that very same sign, in a residential neighborhood that was a shortcut to the local jr. high and high schools. I had my sister in the car with me, and I slowed way down (had a low car at the time) to go across one. Suddenly, sister thrust her arms out, grabbed the dash, and started...well, doing what the sign said

It's a good thing I was already driving at a crawl, because I think I would have gone off the road otherwise, laughing as hard as I was!