For aperson to apply for guard duty at the tomb, he must be between 5' 10' and 6' 2' tall andhis waist size cannot exceed 30.

They must commit 2 years of life to guard the tomb, live in a barracks under the tomb, and cannotdrink any alcohol on or off duty for the rest of their lives. They cannot swear in public for therest of their lives and cannot disgrace the uniform or the tomb in any way.

After two years, the guard is given a wreath pin that is worn on their lapel signifying theyserved as guard of the tomb. There are only 400 presently worn. The guard must obeythese rules for the rest of their lives or give up the wreath pin.

The shoes are specially made with very thick soles to keep the heat and cold from their feet.There are metal heel plates that extend to the top of the shoe in order to make the loud click asthey come to a halt.

There are no wrinkles, folds or lint on the uniform. Guards dress for duty in front of a full-lengthmirror.

The first six months of duty a guard cannot talk to anyone nor watch TV. All off duty time is spent studying the 175 notable people laid to rest in Arlington National Cemetery .A guard must memorize who they are and where they are interred. Among the notables are:

In 2003 as Hurricane Isabelle was approaching Washington, DC , our US Senate/House took 2 daysoff with anticipation of the storm. On the ABC evening news, it was reported that because ofthe dangers from the hurricane, the military members assigned the duty of guarding the Tombof the Unknown Soldier were given permission to suspend the assignment. Theyrespectfully declined the offer, "No way, Sir!" Soaked to the skin,

marching in the pelting rain of a tropical storm, they said thatguarding the Tomb was not just an assignment, it was the highest honor that can beafforded to a service person. The tomb has been patrolled continuously, 24/7, since 1930.

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman."

The priest asks, "Is that you, little Johnny Parisi?"

"Yes, Father, it is.""And who was the woman you were with?"

"I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Johnny, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you mayas well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?"

"I cannot say.""Was it Teresa Volpe?""I'll never tell."

"Was it Nina Capelli?"

"I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."

"Was it Cathy Piriano?"

"My lips are sealed."

"Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?""Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

The priest sighs in frustration. "You're very tight lipped, JohnnyParisi, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be analtar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself."Johnny walks back to his pew, and his friend Nino slides over andwhispers, "What'd you get?"

Saturday, November 1, 2014

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises...

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing.They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St.. Peter returns.

"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren, very hot land covered with waste and garbage.

He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above. Smoke filters through a suspicious crack in the ground....

The devil, now complete with horns & wings, comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning...... Today you voted."