This story is an example how attending college is not as important as people make it out to be, also how for the most part the bar exam is a complete waste.

Just look at the case of Kimberly Kitchen, 45, of James Creek, PA, who actually made partner at the law firm where she worked for nearly a decade as an estate lawyer, without actually having the legal authority to do so.

Via Yahoo / The AP:

PITTSBURGH (AP) — A woman used forged documents to pose as an estate lawyer for a decade and made partner at her small firm before her fraud was discovered, according to charges announced Friday.

Kimberly Kitchen was charged Thursday with forgery, unauthorized practice of law and felony records tampering.

State prosecutors contend Kitchen fooled BMZ Law by forging a law license, bar exam results, an email showing she attended Duquesne University law school and a check for a state attorney registration fee. The firm is based in Huntingdon, about 110 miles east of Pittsburgh.

Kitchen, of nearby James Creek, handled estate planning for more than 30 clients “despite never having attended law school,” the attorney general’s office said. She even served as president of her county bar, her lawyer said.

“She’s an incredibly competent person, and she worked very diligently and was devoted to the people she served,” lawyer Caroline Roberto said. “There are things about the charges we don’t agree with.” Read More…

Hey people in that part of the country root for the Steelers, all you have to do is know a few big sounding words and of course they are going to think you’re a lawyer.

You hardly ever saw Grandaddy down here He only came to town about twice a year He’d buy a hundred pounds of yeast and some copper line Everybody knew that he made moonshine Now the revenue man wanted Grandaddy bad He headed up the holler with everything he had It’s before my time but I’ve been told He never came back from Copperhead Road

— Steve Earle “Copperhead Road“

Prohibition, one of many profoundly stupid ideas from “progressive” Democrats who just love to ban things, was repealed in 1933. In 1978, one of the only good things that piece of garbage ever did, Jimmy Carter signed into law legislation that made the private home brewing of beer legal. Why the hell then is “moonshining” still a thing?

It is fucking despicable that over 80 years have passed since the repeal of prohibition, over 2 centuries have passed since we over-threw a tyrannical government and home distilling is still not a legal thing in this country.

The government shouldn’t even have the fucking right to even think about banning stuff like that.

Kam Brock, a 32-year-old Jamaican-born rapper from Long Island, who goes by the stage name Akilah Brock, claims that she was falsely detained last year in a Harlem mental institution. Brock has filed a lawsuit at Manhattan Federal Court saying she was wrongly told she had bipolar disorder and was forced to endure eight days at the mental facility at Harlem Hospital. Amongst her claims is that she was institutionalized because she claimed that President Barack Obama follows her on twitter — a claim which is actually true.

Brock states that she she was heavily sedated by the hospital staff, she states that she only mentioned to doctors that the president follows her on Twitter to show them “the type of person I am. I’m a good person, a positive person. Obama follows positive people.”

The official @BarackObama twitter handle, which is run by Organizing For Action, follows over 640 thousand followers, including Brock’s @AkilahBrock handle.

Kam “Akilah” Brock, claims she was branded delusional for saying President Obama was a twitter follower.

Brock’s lawsuit alleges that her discharge after 8 days was made contingent on her denying that Obama followed her twitter.

“Objective: Patient will verbalize the importance of education for employment and will state that Obama is not following her on Twitter,” the document reads.

It also notes “patient’s weaknesses: inability to test reality, unemployment.”

Adding insult to insanity, the hospital hit Brock with a bill of $13,637.10, she charges in her suit seeking unspecified damages.

The bizarre experience began Sept. 12, when the NYPD seized her prized 2003 BMW 325Ci in Harlem because they suspected she was high on weed, her attorney, Michael Lamonsoff, said. Cops found no marijuana but confiscated her ride anyway, he said. The NYPD declined to comment.

The following day, Brock walked into the NYPD’s Public Service Area 6 stationhouse in Harlem to retrieve her car, her suit charges.

Brock — an eccentric 32-year-old born in Jamaica with dreams of making it big in the entertainment business — admitted in an interview she was “emotional,” but insisted she in no way is an “emotionally disturbed person.”

Nevertheless, cops cuffed her and put her in an ambulance bound for the hospital, her suit charges. Read More…

While I think there might be a little bit more to this story, she looks to have a very good case. The standards for whatever reasons the NYPD determines that someone needs to be locked up in a psych ward seem to be ridiculously low.

Then again, anyone who voted for or supports Barack Obama is probably in need of at least some mental help.

While the Brazilian basketball star’s name may stand out on paper, it’s pronounced “Foo-key” and is of German origin.

“It doesn’t mean what people think it means,” said Fuck. “In German it means fox.”

Given the fact that Fuck’s name could bring about unwanted confusion, the college initially opted to use his middle, or first-last name, Carbagiale.

“In a lot of ways, at the beginning we were just going to avoid any confusion or any potential issues, whereas now we’re at the point of, this is the guy’s name, he’s an all-Canadian. We shouldn’t be avoiding it, he’s proud of being a Rattler and we want to support him,” said Rattlers head coach Craig Price. “I think he takes great pride in his heritage, in where he comes from, and technically in what his name is.” Read More…

Except I thought “Fuchs” was the German word for fox, this guys name is just fuck. Own it dude.

Marina McCarthy, 22, was charged with possession of a controlled substance after she was caught trying to hide heroin in her lady garden.

Ladies, when are you going to learn the proper usage of your lady gardens? Hoo-has aren’t for hiding things, much-less heroin — especially when you’re pregnant.

Unfortunately for, Marina McCarthy, 22, of Gouldsboro, Pennsylvania , that was a lesson that was never taught to her. After a routine traffic stop in New Jersey, the six month pregnant woman was arrested after police discovered that she had 89 packets of heroin lodged firmly up her love canal.

I bet you that was a fun pat down.

McCarthy was arrested last Friday after pulled over in a traffic stop with her boyfriend, Dakota Dunning, 27, over a minor traffic offense. Dunning was found to have been driving under a suspended license and the vehicle was unregistered and unlicensed.

Since they were unable to come up with a plausible, or consistant story on how they were driving around in an unregistered and uninsured vehicle, combined with what the cops suspected were fresh needle track marks on Dunning’s body, made the police decide to call in the drug sniffing dogs.

That’s when things got fun.

Via NorthJersey.com:

McCarthy, who was taken to police headquarters because she had a warrant from Sparta for $1,000, had been handcuffed in the front of her body because she was six months pregnant, the captain said. When Detective James Calaski was viewing the car’s camera footage, he saw her reaching into her pants numerous times.

A female Wyckoff police officer came to Glen Rock headquarters and McCarthy retrieved the bags of heroin from her body in the bathroom in the presence of the Wyckoff officer, Miller said.

She was checked out by borough EMTs but refused to go to the hospital, he said. After being charged, she was released pending a court appearance on March 17. Read More…

Amie Carter, 31, arrested and charged with criminal mischief and exposure of sexual organs after pleasuring herself in front of a Lexus.

How I missed this story last month when it was first reported, I will never know.

Last February in Orlando, Florida, police arrested 31-year-old Amie Carter after she was found stomping naked on the hood of a Lexus that she had just finished pleasuring herself in front of — while a couple was inside the vehicle.

Now that’s a girl to bring home to Momma.

Via The Orlando Sentinel:

While atop the vehicle, Amie Carter, 31, stomped on the hood and threw a cellphone at car stopped behind the vehicle she was standing on, according to an arrest report.

Carter was arrested and taken to Orange County Jail.

She was charged with criminal mischief and exposure of sexual organs.

Officers responded to East Par Street and Formosa Avenue about 11:15 p.m. Sunday regarding a naked woman walking in traffic.

When police arrived, they saw Carter walking in the middle of Formosa Avenue. She wasn’t wearing any clothes, the report said.

“Carter appeared to be under the influence [of] a heavy unknown substance,” officers wrote in the report. “She appeared in an altered mental state, displaying extremely irrational and volatile behavior.” Read More…

Gilbert Thomas Curtsinger, 45, was arrested on charges of receiving stolen property over $10,000, four counts of possession of a controlled substance and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Responding to a phone tip, the Franklin County Kentucky Sheriffs Department arrested Gilbert Thomas Curtsinger, 45, after finding about $30,000 worth of Stolen Wild Turkey Bourbon sitting in barrels in his back yard.

Sounds like he was planning one hell of a party.

Via WKYT:

The large haul was the five barrels of 2008 bourbon, which were taken from Wild Turkey Distillery in Anderson County. Melton said investigators found the barrels, which are worth between $3,700 and $6,000 each, behind a storage building or shed on Curtsinger’s property.

“Obviously this is a significant amount of bourbon. It’s more than I’ve ever seen,” Sheriff Pat Melton said.

Investigators say Curtsinger worked in the loading dock area at Buffalo Trace. Melton said there is another suspect who works at Wild Turkey. He declined to name that suspect. The sheriff also would not say how they managed to steal the barrels, which weigh 500 pounds each, because it’s part of the ongoing investigation.

Melton would not connect this case — but did not rule out — the possibility that it could be tied to the October 2013 theft of tens of thousands of dollars worth of Pappy Van Winkle. In that case, the Pappy was reported stolen from the Buffalo Trace Distillery in Frankfort.

“I’m very optimistic. I said that a long time ago when this first started and I’m as optimistic now. We’re still working this case. Detectives are working and we’re following up on every lead. The more leads we get on Pappy, the more were gonna follow those up,” Sheriff Pat Melton said. Read More…

A pair of Russian bears who have been living in a cage outside of a Sochi restaurant for the past 20 years, have reportedly become addicted to alcohol and will be headed to a rehabilitation center in Romania.

According to The Big Hearts Foundation, a British-based charity, the two male bears, which have been seized from the owner of the restaurant in Sochi, have been offered a new home at a bear sanctuary outside Brasov, Romania, where officials said the animals would be treated for alcohol addiction.

Anna Kogan, founder of the Big Hearts Foundation, told the Independent the condition of the bears was “truly appalling.”

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The Big Hearts Foundation said the bears “drowned in beer” at the restaurant for 20 years, as patrons would frequently pass drinks to the animals. “There are drunken people who come to the restaurant, park their cars in front of the bears and throw things to the animals so that they get drunk and behave funnily. They are held in cages — and have been blinded by the car lights,” Kogan told The Independent.

Dzhenkis Uzaroshvili, the owner of the Sochi restaraunt and now former-owner of the bears, denies that anything was wrong with the Bears.

Dzhenkis Uzaroshvili, the former owner of the Bears stated, “It is not my concern what visitors are doing to the bears. I am not giving them’ I give them food and water and I do not to anyone because they are my property. ’understand which type of claims can be made.”

Via The UK Daily Mail:

It is thought the bears first appeared at the Patskha-Guria restaurant about 20 years ago when they were cubs.

To begin with the owner Dzheniks Uzaroshvili charged people to have their picture taken with his new pets. But as they grew older, and bigger, they were placed in a small pen.

Visitors continued to come to his restaurant to see his animal attraction and he started allowing people to give them beer and junk food for entertainment.

Mr Uzaroshvili insisted the bears were being kept in normal conditions, telling journalists: ‘Beer is good for them because they live in such a climate.’

However, a number of local people complained about the treatment and protests were held in front of the premises.

‘Nobody has ever done a normal veterinary examination of these bears,’ said one nearby resident, called Natalia. ‘They do not get proper food, they do not have clean water, and there is only a stinking liquid, consisting of a small amount of water and animals’ own urine.

‘There are also people who make fun of the poor animals. Visitors of the restaurant regularly give the bears alcoholic beverages to drink and feed them with chips, cakes and other unsuitable food.’ Read More…

I’m not normally one of those crazy “animals are better then people” types, but man would I like about five minutes alone and a Louisville Slugger in my hands with the scumbag that mistreated these poor animals.