It Takes Courage and Humility

I have been in the Addiction Recovery Program for three and a half years. And in that time I have made many friends. I now have over 200 numbers in my phone of guys I've met.

Out of that group of guys, there is a small number, who, as I view them, are in "true recovery." So recently, I paid special attention to that small group to try to figure out what they had in common. And in doing so, I discovered something surprising -- something I had not expected to find.

Let me use just two of that small group as examples. One is a facilitator who now has over 900 days of sobriety. The other has over 400 days of sobriety. So what is one thing they have in common? They still reach out for support on a regular basis. My friend with over 400 days of sobriety reaches out and asks for support and prayers from the group, on the average of once per week. My friend with over 900 days of sobriety reaches out at least twice a month, if not more.

I didn't expect that. I would have expected that those who are successful in recovery would no longer need to reach out for support -- that they would now be self sustaining. But that's not the case. They continue to reach out on a regular basis. Keep in mind, it takes both courage and humility to reach out and admit you can't do it yourself -- that you need help, both from the Lord and from friends. And these guys have that courage and humility to do just that.

I could have used others as examples, but with these two, I actually knew how many days they had been sober.

Now what about the larger group -- those who are not in true recovery. What is their experience? Well I would guess that the average rate of messing up or acting out for this group might be as often as once a week. And yet, as a group, they hardly ever reach out and ask for help. And if they do reach out, it's usually after they have relapsed. So why is that? I'm guessing it's because they haven't internalized Steps 1, 2, and 3. They are still trying to recover on their own without admitting they need help. They are still struggling with pride. They do not have the courage or the humility of the smaller group of successful men.

I was in the latter group for a long time. But I am now trying to recognize and admit much sooner when I am starting down a dangerous path and then do PMS. Pray to Heavenly Father, Move or change my environment, and get Support from my brothers. I've discovered that reaching out, to both God and my friends, actually works!