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Wednesday, February 9, 2011

CHAT-ORDER BRIDE

CHAT-ORDER BRIDE

Originally Posted on June 3, 2009 at 11:30 AM

June 3, 2009

11:30 Am

I went to an internet cafe to scan my drawing. I planned to color the line art in my friend's computer so I asked the attendant to save the file in the CD-RW I provided. But there was a problem with their Nero that she had to go to their house and tried to burn the file in their personal computer. When she came back, she told me that if I can borrow a USB of my friend i should do so because it's still not working. I had no choice but to leave and go to my friend's house.

On my way back to the internet cafe, when i told the tricycle driver where i was heading, he assumed that I am looking for an American (foreigner) boyfriend through Chat.

I told him "no, i don't do that."

He said, "Why not? If I were you, i would find a foreigner for a husband." Then he looked at the big mansion-like houses we passed by.

"If only i was born a girl i would go to the internet cafe and chat with foreigners for the hope that someone would propose and marry me and take me out from poverty."

I told him: "I dont need instant money. I want to work hard for something that I want to have. Besides, marrying someone (foreigner or local) for the sake of money does not guarantee that would find happiness. Real Happiness."

"Well, you're right There's a nice feeling if you have gained something you have work hard for, blood and sweat."

Our conversation ended there when we finally arrived. I bid him goodbye and say thank you as I gave him my fare.

I don't usually talk to strangers especially tricycle drivers. Most of the time I would just sit quietly while looking at the houses and tress that we passed by while the driver is also silent with his eyes focused on the road. But in this case I had to speak up when he started a conversation. Also, I need to defend myself and maybe straighten his wrong thinking that all women who went inside the internet cafe are only looking for someone to use as a mean to get rich.

I wonder if every time someone sees me enter or came out from an internet cafe, they would think the same way with that tricycle driver. I cant blame him though. Many women nowadays are looking for husbands through internet. Even in my hometown beautiful houses would seem to sprout overnight. If I would be gone for a month, when i came back I would see another new house under construction. And when I asked, people would usually answer me with "Because of Chat." "Her boyfriend sends her money every week/month that's why she is able to construct a nice house."

If you have a neighbor who gets rich so fast, it is either she has a foreigner boyfriend or maybe they're doing something illegal. There are some exceptions though, that is, if they have won millions from LOTTO (Sweepstakes) or they have a relative working abroad.

For some people, it's ok to marry someone you meet in the chat room. For others, it is not.

Note that the following are not based on LOVE:

Why some Foreigners marry Filipino women:

Most of the foreigners who marry Filipino women are in their 50s, 60s, 70s and 80s. They are usually divorced and are retiring. They want to stay in the Philippines because their money has high value. If they are poor in the US (for example), they can live as a king in the Philippines. They also wants someone to take care for them. A companion is what they needed and they believe that the Filipino women are good at giving TLC. They don't want to grow old without someone to take care of them. They don't want to be put in an institution for old people. So they don't care to spend their money from their retirement to have a wife.

Why some Filipino women marry Foreigners:

Most of the women who marry foreigners are those who are living below poverty line. Usually, single mothers at the very young age. Some were also separated or were abandoned by their partner or husband and are left to take care of their children. They don't have means to provide for their living,usually they live with their old parents and depends on them for their needs. They believe that marrying a foreigner could uplift their situation. They don't care even if there is a big gap in their age or even if the husband is already balding or even if he is on a wheelchair (I saw one in our plaza) as long as they will not starve and they can buy branded clothing, a laptop, a new cellphone or a car.

For me, there's nothing wrong with marrying a foreigner IF you love him and not his money. Money cant buy love. It cant buy real Joy or happiness. If you have a chat mate and you fell in love with him/her, then that's fine. Marry him/her! But if you're only marrying for money, you are bound to destruction, a life that is full of tears and unhappiness.

Do I see myself marrying a foreigner? Uhmm, I prefer a Filipino but that's still too far from now. As I've said in my journal "Singe but Not Alone" I'm not in a hurry and I'm not yet ready. If my prince or Romeo is American, Japanese, Korean, British, etc.. it doesn't matter. What matters is that we love each other and that we have GOD at the center of our relationship.

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Want to know more about God? Want to draw nearer to Him? God said, "Draw near to me and I will draw near to you." (James 4:8) This blog is my way of drawing near to God through Bible journal (which I post here as a blog), writing poems and through drawing (art). I've posted some of my personal letters to God and the poems I wrote during the most difficult time in my life, hoping that it will give you encouragement and will usher you to draw nearer to God too not only in times of despair but also during happy times.

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Born on the 8th of November, she is the youngest in the family. She accepted Jesus Christ as her personal Savior and became a Christian when she was in 1st year college (16 years old). She had dry seasons and even went to the extent of backsliding. She stopped going to church for two years. She was still a baby Christian during that time but the Lord never stop reaching out to her. God used her Bible Study leader, who was also very patient with her and persevered and continued their one-on one study with God's Word. God also used her co-major/classmate who is also a Christian, invited her to spend a night in their boarding house for Cell group/Devotional and to go to church. That comaj fellowship to that same church/campus ministry she used to attend. One Sunday, February 5, 2006, she recommit herself to the Lord after a personal encounter with God. Now, she is a worship leader (glory to God alone) and is persevering to stand firm in the faith to the very end, wanting to know God more and more and fall in love with Him deeply.