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scampi delay: now with whining

Today was not my day, and compleeeetely of my own doing. Shrimp is in hand, as well as another bottle of the delightful Fume Blanc, but all the cheer has been consumed with pondering.

Didn’t get my Amazon Fresh order in by 10, didn’t want to go to Ralphs/Vons, no parking (as usual!) at Trader Joe’s, decided to fight the traffic on the 405 and head to Lazy Acres. Everything was fine until I hit the checkout.

As I was swiping my debit card, a question arose in the back of my head. Do I actually have money in the cash account? In theory, yes. In practice, I keep the cash balance low because I can earn 4% or more on high-yield bonds versus 0.10% in interest check–

**CARD DECLINED**

That answered that question. But that was fine; I could put in an order to sell a few shares tomor–

“Ma’am, did you just try to use your EBT card?”

“Mmmm, no.”

“Oh. I just asked because there’s a different amount here on the screen (points)…”

“Nah, I just have to transfer funds from my brokerage account. I’ll use another card.”

It was only when I got back to the car that I wondered why that was the question…whether I had just used my EBT card to buy:

Jumbo prawns, $25.99/lb

Grgich Hills Napa Valley 2013 Fume Blanc, $29.99/bottle

Fresh cut fruit container (2), $4.05 and $4.93 respectively

Sliced smoked turkey, $2.82 ($11.99/lb)

Ahi tuna poke, $16.99/lb

Amy’s Organic Cheese & Pesto Frozen Pizza, $7.92

Organic cherry tomatoes, $2.99/pint

Who the fuck buys that kind of stuff on an EBT card? Someone who enjoys starving most of the month? When I was on food stamps (19 years ago, when I was issued something resembling Monopoly money), I’d wouldn’t have been in a Lazy Acres type of market generally, let alone blow my $65/month benefit on stuff like that.

Yeah, I have a pretty good inkling why I was asked. There wasn’t enough Social Justice Warrior in me to get mad at the checkout line, nor in the car, nor now. I’m just going to eat my poke, sip my wine, place my trade order, and ponder. Scampi tomorrow, Hubert Keller’s macaroni and cheese the night after.