Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Controversial actor, Solomon Akiyesi, came to public attention after his well-publicized Bigamy scandal last year, read here. He was caught in church by his second wife when he was about to marry his third wife, without properly divorcing his first or second wife.

Solomon Akiyesi is now fully divorced from all women and spoke with YNaija recently about what happened last year, his mistakes and regrets, his thoughts on marriage, and dating Genevieve Nnaji, Rita Dominic or Kate Henshaw.

His definition of a happy and successful man he says, is “he who is able to fulfil his responsibilities to fellow humans, his wife and kids and to God. Once a man is able to do this without fretting or stressing then he is a success”

Solomon Akiyesi insists the only reason to marry is because you need a companion who will add value to your life, saying, “I WILL MAKE THEE A COMPANION” were the words that came from God when he created eve for Adam.”

Reflecting on his marriage mistakes, he listed 10 very bad reasons for any one to get married;

1. “Don’t go into marriage unless you are able and willing to provide financial and emotional security for your wife

2. Don’t manage anything you are not sure of as you go into marriage.

3. Ensure you won’t have to look for anything else in another woman, don’t love stupidly.

4. Don’t take any risk in the name of making anybody happy, don’t marry just because you have dated for long.

5. Don’t marry because your mates are marrying and;

6. To the ladies, don’t marry him if he’s mummy’s pet unless you can stand his mummy coming to your matrimonial home to decide what quantity and quality of soup you should serve his beloved son.

7. Don’t marry her if she’s daddy’s pet unless you are prepared to commit your marital life paying back daddy’s “investment” on his beloved daughter…or you are ready to be chased out of your home on account of deliberately or mistakenly hurting the golden daughter.

8. Don’t marry the first born and family cash cow unless you are ready to accept certain base lines in the scheme of things.

9. Don’t marry because of the sole reason of having children. The wife is not a baby factory.

10. Don’t marry because you need a man to help you take care of your extended family…pay school fees…build your father a house or take your family off poverty lane.

On whether the bigamy scandal was one of his regrets in life;

“I don’t regret the incident at all, the only regret I carry around in my life is my inability to save my mother from death even she begged me to. She was very sick and begged me not to let her die, she told me on her sick bed that if she died there might be a paradigm shift in my life, and truly the shift did come…..and massively too.

I married in 2003 and walked out of it years later because of my impatience for deceit and lies. I tried my hands on marriage again in 2007 and I was quite comfortable and happy with that because I loved her to death until the adventure that came my way last year.

I am actually happier being alone, some people are not destined to marry, I might just be one of them….I also want to admonish people to have strong facts about any issue before jumping into conclusion and making unguarded statements because of the proliferation of cheap Internet platforms.

For example all the half-wits who were throwing barrages at me because of the event of 13th April last year have not been able to prove that I was actually going to marry another woman beyond the the church drama.

I’ve never paid bride price or gone to court to wed another woman after my wife….my ex wife. I’ve never taken any member of my family to any other village to go and knock on the door of another woman for marriage as a matter of fact I’ve never wedded any woman in any church.

All my attempted marriages were usually hurriedly packaged under pressure and that’s were I get it wrong. A woman shows me a little affection and I’m thinking marriage. A woman says she’s pregnant for me and I’m rushing to the alter without proper check. I trust and love stupidly.

But I know mistakes are for learning and I’ve learnt the hard way but people were fast to jump into conclusions and call me names even when they didn’t know my reason for taking such unmitigated risk that almost tarnished my career and take my friends away. But within the last one year of being alone has taught me greater lessons I couldn’t have learnt as a married man.

On if he would love to date any of the female stars in Nollywood:

“None and it is not because none of them is good enough for me but they are too good to date. Nollywood has beautiful and extremely sexy women. Much as I love to work with any of them, dating is not what I think will work out.

Genevieve is a very cerebral performer, Kate Henshaw has strong confidence, Rita is a beauty to behold and I love the way she walks in those jeans, she has got a talking waist line, they are all too worthy to date”

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