~ A submissive's journey

Tag Archives: Erotic

Possess:
verb
– own, have, hold, be in possession of, be the owner of, have in your possession, have to your name
– control, influence, dominate, consume, obsess, bedevil, mesmerize, eat someone up, fixate, put under a spell
– seize, hold, control, dominate, occupy, haunt, take someone over, bewitch, take possession of, have power over, have mastery over
― Collins Thesaurus of the English Language

I have to write about this now, before the feeling starts to fade even the tiniest bit.

Hours later, it remained. I opened my eyes from sleep and it was as though no time had passed at all. Still tingling all over, my first waking thoughts not thoughts at all, but the lingering blaze of His touch on my body, and it came again, the shortness of breath, heart pounding, aching…

I could only think in moments.. Flashes that were repeating in my head over and over again, just as they had hours before when I finally found release as He had told me to do. My fingers teased my body while my mind was lost in the replay…

His hand twisted into my hair as we stood at the bar. His breath filling my lungs as I tried to catch my own when He kissed me. His touch on the skin beneath my shirt, grasping, squeezing, releasing. His teeth biting my lip. His arms around me as we danced. His hand around my throat as He held me close to him. Him leading me through the crowd, hands on my arms, something about the way He did it that is beyond my understanding at the moment.. The tone in His voice when He said I’m beautiful. Feeling His hardness beneath my hands and seeing fire in His eyes. My ears hearing Him say talk to me, overwhelmed, I could find no words but for these…I..can’t. Euphoric, erotic, time altering, world disappearing, floating through space, and yet tethered to Him by His touch.

As I reread what I just wrote, I made an interesting observation. Though to some the description may sound the same, this is not romance. This is possession. I feel sorry for any women who has never felt the difference… and more deeply thankful than words can express to have been given that gift again.

“He called to her primal side; the ancient aspect of her animal self that wanted to submit. It wanted to submit to him; to sacrifice all of who she was at the altar of his maleness and lay herself bare for his taking.”
― Dianna Hardy, Releasing The Wolf

“I didn’t get to see all your pictures yet, but what I could are amazing.”

I felt that familiar blush of happiness in knowing something I had done had pleased Him. I couldn’t help but smile.

“So I have a thing where I name all my subs. I’m having a hard time coming up with yours.”

“I’ve only ever had one nickname,”, I told Him, and said what it was.

“No, you need a much sexier name.”

“I love that You think that way about me.” It thrilled me that He did. When He looked at me, I could feel it emanating from Him, and thinking of that look aroused me. Speaking of the pictures… “I would love to get your feedback on them, more specifically which ones you liked best and why. That’ll help me tailor any future ones for you. This time I was mostly just guessing.”

“You did a wonderful job. I did notice that in every one of these pictures you had clothing on. Not that I complaining, but why did you not have any nude pictures?”

I explained that it was because He had specifically asked for pictures of me playing with my new toy. The photographer in me had purposefully left only that specific part of myself uncovered in order to focus the eye to that area.

However, that was only part of it. I don’t think naked photos of myself are pretty at all. They’re just…naked. Naked, in my view, is not artful or elegant, or even particularly attractive in most cases, unless one happens to be a gorgeous model with an absolutely perfect body. So, whilst, photographically speaking, remaining clothed to the greater degree made perfect sense, in a much more personal way I had also done so because I didn’t feel comfortable being nude on camera. I so badly wanted the pictures to be pretty for Him, but as we talked I began to understand that I had viewed them through the lens of what I consider pretty, not what He might actually enjoy more.

Insecurities are such an awful thing, rearing their ugly little heads when we least expect them.

“I will have to warn you…I will become upset if you think that I am wrong… If I tell you I like your body, it will upset me if you try to cover it up or become embarrassed being nude around me.”

It’s amazing to me how He can put things into such a different perspective and open my eyes to something that I hadn’t seen on my own. He was entirely correct. By feeling ashamed to be nude on camera for Him, I was essentially saying that there is something wrong with my body, and if that is the case, then He is wrong to find it attractive.

I absolutely enjoy that He is attracted to me, so how can that exist in the same space as the body issue I’d exhibited?