Wednesday, June 13, 2007

It should be a busy Father's Day for these guys

wanna have my baby? baby.

With Father's Day just around the corner, we thought we'd check in to see who might need the day extended into a week just to see all of his kids.

We know that a lot of pro athletes have illegitimate kids (or will soon have some), so we've decided to simply list the most notable and the most, uh, potent athletes in recent memory. We decided not to include people like LeBron James, who's at least with his girlfriend while having kids. We've also categorized the list, just for fun. By the way, if you think Shawn Kemp is the #1 illegitimate sports father, you sir are wrong. A couple of guys seem to have made it their mission in life to produce more kids than Kemp and Brigham Young combined. Plus we all know how competetive athletes are.

By the way, if you would like to add names of people who we didn't put down, go ahead and put them in the comments section.

ATHLETES WITH ILLEGITIMATE KIDS

THE HEAVYWEIGHTSShawn Kemp - 7 illegitimate kids by 6 women. Gives his nickname of the Reign Man new meaning.Evander Holyfield - 9 illegitimate kids. "Heck I'm not even mad, I'm impressed!"Ex-San Antonio Spur Willie Anderson - 9 illegitimate kids. If only his field goal percentage had been as high as his impregnation rate.Derrick Thomas - 7 illegitimate kids by 5 women. He died at 33. Let's just leave it at that.Ray Charles - Not an athlete, but still had 9 illegitimate kids and 12 total, which is quite impressive. Being blind must have made it tough to get that condom on.UPDATE: Don't know how we missed this - thanks to a reader for pointing this out to us - Calvin Murphy reportedly had 14 illegitimate kids by 9 women. Wow.

197 comments:

A lot of these guys I never expected. Like Hakeem Olajuwon. LoLz. Major mojo. On the flip note, Evander Holyfield, Shawn Kemp, and the other heavyweights are sick. Damn! Isaiah Thomas and Kenny Anderson should also be in the list. :D

Hakeem Olajuwon had his "illegitimate kid" with his college sweetheart in 87',...and that was before he gained his reputation as a class act, and before he became religious. And, she carries his name and he has always taken care of her. She plays bball at Oklahoma now.

Daniel Alfredsson and his girl friend have just not chosen to get married. They live together and raise their children together. There is nothing sordid about as your use of the term "illegitimate"implies.

Wilt the Stilt would have to have fathered at least a minimum of 50 illegitimate children with the over 1,000 women that he boasted of sleeping with. Also, what about Tim Duncan? I heard that Tony Parker is actually his first-born son.

The best part about Gary Payton is that his illegitimate kid is named "Gary Payton, Jr." so that when his wife (or whatever) had a kid, and he wanted a junior, he couldn't do it without major confusion, so he named his legitimate kid "Gary Payton II."

Can we add an unintentionally-retired former nfl player? It was rumored that Charles Rogers (of Lions fame) had nearly a half dozen before he left college. Pretty sure one of his baby mamas stabbed him in the stomach during high school also - you gotta get bonus points for that.

My mother swears that Robert Parish was the father of a Boston news anchor woman's (Liz Walker) kid. Every time Parish was mentioned, ole Liz would start bubbling. Next thing we know, single Liz was on maternity leave. We need a DNA test on this one.

Don't forget Al "I played football for USC, but they must have lost my records" Martin. Although he was sued for support of only two "illegitimate" kids from a woman in KC. He upped the ante, that during this, by having two wives living a few blocks from each other, in suburban Phoenix.

How did you miss the King of Paternity Dominique Wilkins...my neighbor in Orlando, worked in the front office for the Magic and the reason Dominique kept playing was due to the fact that he was paying on over 20 Paternity suits.

Proctor's baby momma did not make that post on Askmen. Honestly you can't believe anything you read on the internet. Proctor's mistress got the boot from YES because of her illegit baby with him and he got traded ...leave it alone arleady

Why are nearly all these examples African-Americans? Does being oversexed offer an excuse to making babies that grow up without a Father, then get hardly any attention as the Mother has to work (or is a drug addict/alcoholic)? These kids grow up to join gangs as they provide stability. Then the punk gets busted and goes to prison, which has a strong paternal edifice, which they like and need, so they keep going back. Black America needs to rethink thier apathy in accepting this as the norm. Bastards be damned!

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