A gourmet ice cream shop opened recently, and a friend asked if I've been yet. I said 'no, I just won't go somewhere I know my kids would love but can't have'. Do other people feel this way too? There are other restaurants I'll eat at that I wouldn't take them too, since they wouldn't like it even if they could go (spicy ethnic food), but jsut can't do the ice cream/dessert thing knowing they can't. Anyone else feel this way?

Also, when ordering food in a restaurant I'll avoid anything with peanuts/tree nuts, just in case (of what, I'm not sure...)

Well...I must say that I do eat foods she can't have when I'm out. I don't have anything that is messy, (I wouldn't eat Dorito's or Cheetos because I find the cheese powder gets onto everything)

One thing I won't do no matter who I'm with is buy products that list vegetable oil. It doesn't cost that much to list the couple of possible oils does it? I can usually find a product that lists the oils of I'll do without.

I also have things my son can't have when he's not with me (and/or won't be for a while!) I guess I get tired of the same restaurants so when there's a chance for something different, I go for it. And I must say, I don't feel the least bit guilty about it . . . .

I am, however, VERY careful about cleaning up afterwards.

_________________adult son allergic to peanuts, most tree nuts, eggs and penicillin.

I think avoiding the foods your children cannot have is something different than if it were a different person (spouse..) My sister has told me she feels guilty about eating the foods her daughter cannot have even when they are not together. On the other hand when I am out of town to visit rellies, my husband takes full opportunity to go for dinner at a place where I would never step foot into (seafood place). He also will buy a jar of peanuts and fully enjoy, (he keeps them at his work). I also know when he is at work he will eat what I am allergic to even if i'm at home. He would just never bring it home. My daughter also gets her fill of peanut butter sandwiches at friends homes, she just knows she must wash well and no hug or close contact in a close time line. As the allergic person I do want my family members to enjoy the foods I cannot have, just not when I am around or when I will be with them shortly after.

_________________Me-Allergic to Peanut, Tree Nut, Coconut, Shellfish, ASA and Asthma
My Husband and Children No Allergies

I don't feel guilty eating her allergens when she's not around (I do feel contaminated). I feel guilty eating her allergens when she is around. I'm starting to get over it.

When we see my MIL, we go to a restaurant because she hates to cook. We bring our daughter's food and they heat it up but the restaurant is a buffet. Lately, our dauhgter has asked to go up to see the food with us and at the omlette station she asks to be allowed to order the ingredients for us.

She is also very interested in cooking shows of all kinds. I guess she's just curious.

I have to laugh at this - yes, when I am able to travel or on a girl's getaway, I dive into the peanut butter...funny enough, my older boys also do this when they are at other homes for sleepovers (or is it stay awake overs?) The parents at their regular friends stock up for them! We miss it, but I want my PA child (youngest) home to be a safe place for him so all product that contains his allergies are not allowed in my house...by the way, I did have one of my older boys' friends who is PA, tell me that it was nice to come to our house, because he knew it was a safe place for him...

For an ice cream place that was our family treat we do not go as that was something special we did together and it just doesn't feel right to go without her.

When hubby and I went out for our anniversary we had a dessert with our daughter's #1 allergen, hazlenut, which has always been my favourite and neither of us enjoyed it. Somehow knowing what it could do to her negated any pleasure in it...

However, for her less severe allergens we eat them around her and she is fine.

What I do enjoy is being able to go into a bakery and just buy anything if she will not be eating it --- we still do not buy anything with nuts but it was just fun to have some variety as our safe bakery is very limited.

_________________me: allergic to crustaceans plus environmental
teenager: allergic to hazelnuts, some other foods and environmental

When I'm out alone or just with DH, we will eat eat foods especially desserts with our kids' serious allergies, and we just make sure we are careful with hand washing, toothbrushes not touching, not sharing food with them, etc after we get home. For some reason, I feel OK eating tree nuts, but tend to avoid peanuts, not sure why, as both are allergic to peanuts, and DS is also allergic to tree nuts. Perhaps it's because his RAST numbers are not as high as DD's one for peanut?

I have no shame - I eat places that she can't eat every chance I get! BUT I don't eat pb or peanuts (or her worst three tree nuts) just cuz I might get the proteins on her when I got home. It's not a guilt thing, though at all I give and give and give to these little munchkins

I took my oldest dd to the ice cream parlour to "celebrate" the end of the school year and that was nice, but we certainly didn't tell little dd or ds that we went. And we don't make a habit out of it. By the same token, I've taken little dd to the park, the pool, etc. while big dd was in school, so....you know....it all works out in the end.

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