While George HW Bush was considered a sub par president who advanced through personal meanness in his life you would think he’s FDR for all the preposterous pomp of the weeklong funeral. When it comes to presidents it seems, the less important the longer the mourning period. Did the country stop dead when Eisenhower died? No one seemed this upset when Dutch Reagan shuffled off this mortal coil.

Could it merely be that Bush Sr just lived so long that there was enough time to re-cast a career and presidency that was seen as a flaming bag of failure in his time? Simply put; most likely, yes.

New World Order and Revisionist History

The current ‘memory’ of the George HW Bush is one of the most successfully “retconned” political careers to date, with new storylines and ‘information’. It’s part Gaslighting and part Mandela Effect.

The two titles he seems to have locked up is “Everyone’s Favorite President Named George Bush” and “most musically sampled president in History at his time” for always relying on so many meaningless Happy-Time quotes that would be sampled and parodied.

George HW Bush talked in such drivel that even Trump was able to work a few laughs out of trashing the “Thousand Points of Light” that Bush often spoke of but could never really explain.

George HW Bush may not have been the meanest guy in DC, but he could get ornery. He famously hounded Alexander Haig out of Reagan’s cabinet over a few poorly chosen words when their boss caught a bullet.

The whole aftermath of the Reagan shooting made Bush look like a nattering, brittle jerk. Most people would have just yelled at Haig in private. The average American knew that the vice president was in charge and that Haig was speaking figuratively and at worst meant he was the guy calling the shots for the next 20 minutes while they grabbed Bush and got him in front of a camera.

Campaigns of Hate Waged by a Perceived Wimp

George HW Bush had run for president a bunch of times and was meaner and more desperate every time. By the time he wins his one term he’s redefined the concept of Gutter Campaigning with the INFAMOUS Willie Horton Ad ( which he borrowed from Al Gore, but was still wrong).

In terms of presidential Intellects he was a step up from Reagan but failed to match the wit and guile we’d seen from previous presidents. He came off as bad as Lyndon Johnson or Harry Truman despite an Ivy League education.

George HW Bush was also just not a visionary when it came to solutions. Sometimes he seemed to be looking right at a problem and fail to see it. He was competent but not impressive.

As a speaker few were worse. A bad nasal voice, often derided as ‘wimpy sounding’, a penchant for whining and body language almost as bad as Richard Nixon were a toxic brew. He was an underwhelming Chief Executive, especially when on TV. Adding props, like evidence from a drug buy, only made it worse.

President Bush, on live TV, with a huge bag of Crack.

No one alive will at that time will ever forget his strange Oval Office Address on the ridiculous War on Drugs.

In a moment of legitimately hilarious fake anger he waved a bag of actual Crack around. Like everyone else; I want to know what happened to that Crack. Is it in his presidential library or did he smoke it with his staff? At any rate, all the bad traits were on display. In debates he could usually keep up, but he would look arrogantly at his watch and stare at the floor when not speaking. It looked bad.

While he had a sense of humor he wasn’t exactly bringing down the house with the jokes. The lost references about the Brooklyn Dodgers and an inability to connect with the common American killed his attempts at humor most times.

The best thing you could say about his sense of humor was the guy was a good sport most of the time. Dana Carvey is still alive, right?

Neither a Uniter nor a Divider so much as a sober and steady helmsman at best, he was no friend to women, minorities or the poor. His record dealing with the AIDS crisis should be held in special contempt. It would be wrong to call him compassionate.

Still, as incumbent and having scored a military a win in the pointless Gulf War he should have been a shoe-in, but lost his bid for reelection. Not because he was too darn nice either. It was another brutal Culture War Campaign fought on the Low Road all the way.

It really came down to having a terrible Texas sized rivalry with pint sized Powerhouse Ross Perot. Most Historians think the Perot Campaign was an ego trip and at the end just a way to shaft Bush.

Perot – The Man Who Wouldn’t Be King

If you can’t really remember Perot think of “King of the Hill” Character

Cotton Hill

Cotton Hill. He was surely based on short, intense and emotional Perot. They certainly have similar voices. In his own time Perot was not so very different from Trump. The exceptions being Perot was a self-made man and not a money grubbing Russian Puppet.

It was lost on people at the time that Perot outflanked Bush from the RIGHT and got nearly one vote in 5 (19%) in the election that he and Bush lost to Bill Clinton.

Only the wrong people notice this or when the right people talked about it they were simply ignored.

Bush’s personal rivalry with fellow Texan Ross Perot probably cost him a second term. Perot would pre-sage more organized and resolute Tea Party Types that were fermenting. For his own part, Perot was a little bit of a flake and his vice president pick was worse than Sarah Palin. In fact Admiral Stockdale imploded on TV to the point Dan Quayle seemed wise. That was pretty much the end of that.

When it was past the point where he could win Perot was barely campaigning and the rumor was he just hated George Bush so much and had so much money he was staying in just to spite Bush. If true it worked.

Imperial Japan’s Final Defiant Finger of Failure

We all wish the Japanese had been slightly better Marksmen and spared us all two terrible presidents. They couldn’t have picked a more destructive person to make a war hero. In fact he would one day return to puke on their leader while either drunk or messed up from bad sushi. The image of a half out of it president barfing on another world leader is the first I recall of his presidential “style.”

The scandals and lack of integrity fueled endless negative headlines. Iran-Contra, Oliver North and the tanking of the economy all add up to “this guy was a mediocre president and we’re lucky he wasn’t reelected.”

Still it needs to be noted that while equally brave, George HW Bush was a MUCH better pilot than John McCain. The two biggest differences being that George Bush almost never pancaked onto the deck upon returning to the carrier, even when his plane was damaged; and never crashed into telephone wires with a hooker in the plane showing off in Italy.

At the end the best part of the funeral was how every ex president, even Jimmy Carter, whose not well himself, simply ignored or side-eyed Trump.

Happy Trails George HW Bush. The only person so far I voted FOR before I voted AGAINST as president

Heres a metal song comprising mostly of quotes from the late presidents time in office

American’s were born out of a War. We don’t shy away from fighting them. In fact America has a long and storied military history.

Sometimes, like when the Brits oppressed us or the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor, its pretty righteous.

Then there’s the Wars of Choice that we never needed to get involved in. Some were more justified than others. They were all fought for the wrong reasons; or arguably, for no reason. In spite of that we ‘won’ two of them.

So here’s my countdown from 3 to 1 of the Most Useless Wars in American History#3- Vietnam-

Tale of the Tape-

We fought hard for a bunch of dicks running a corrupt democracy with no love for or from their own people. The Vietnamese government was a mess and had been at least since the French reoccupied after World War 2. Had South Vietnam not been corrupt and had inspired patriotism they just might still be around. As it was, not too many of their citizens were willing to die for that government. This seems especially true for those who filtered through its ineffective army over the long conflict.

We had no true reason to go.

The Vietnamese never aspired to attack America. Ho Chi Minh ground out victory in much the same way that George Washington had. By refusing to surrender, even through years of punishing attrition. By keeping the war “real” way back in the USA through a steady stream of dead young Americans to erode popular support. Also; just holding on to enough of their country to not NOT get knocked out of the war for good. You can credit US policy for this. We just weren’t willing to risk the likely consequences of invading the North. Not least among these was fear the Chinese or even more likely the Russians would jump in with both feet and we’d all bumble our way into World War 3!

The price of the war was incalculable but lets try for some perspective. Lots of American’s end up fighting in some capacity in a war that got more and more brutal and intense. The United States lost about 50,000 Americans killed over about 8 years. It was enough to destroy public opinion by the end of 1968. A few years earlier expectation of victory had been high.

And we unleashed unmitigated HELL upon the people of Vietnam. So while America surely paid an unacceptable price in Vietnam; the resolve of the Vietnamese leaders and people in the face of overwhelming military force and concentrated industrial level violence was nothing short of incredible. They wanted it more.

Vietnam lost no less that 200 thousand soldiers and civilian casualty estimates are about one million. And thats without addressing all the wounded of any kind, let alone things that affected people from both sides like PTSD or a dose of Agent Orange.

In fact its the American War for Independence in reverse with the ‘Oppressive far away Imperialist power’ role played by America. Astonishing, but true.Positives–

Almost 20 years of War Weariness that kept World War 3 from going down. Don’t underestimate this. As proof all I can say is nothing as bad as the Cuban Missile Crisis has really happened since. The Bloom was off the Rose, the US COULD Lose.

There’s several Great War Movies; Full Metal Jacket being the best

The two nations now enjoy a close relationship.Honors/Accolades-

Currently the only all out total loss for America. And it was a big loss. No two ways about it. Despite tactical success there were only Pyrrhic Victories in Vietnam for the US. In American Military History Vietnam stands alone and is sort of synonymous with failure and, even sadder, futility.

Best Soundtrack of any American War. Songs like Paint It Black by the Stones start a musical movement and at the end even Black Sabbath was around, a band thats partly a reaction to the war. There’s too many great songs to count. Creedence Clearwater Revival alone has like 3 iconic songs that people relate to the war.

Widespread Distrust of the Government and popularization of recreational drugs are also considered to be related to the War.

Black Prisoner of War Flags that seem to have began in this era have endured in the town squares of America flying under the American Flag.Notable Negatives–

America takes an ass kicking from a bunch of stone age commies with AK-47’s; the political career of John McCain was a mixed bag at best; a generation of Domestic Terrorists; a generation of neglected homeless Vets making up the majority of Homeless Populations in every major city becomes National Disgrace for 2 decades; The ME Generation.

The Biggest Negative has to be when the War was revealed to be a years long Racist Atrocity Party where we basically attacked the shit out of the civilians. Too many bad, maudlin movies try in vain to present the war as having a cause and being Just. This just isn’t true. There was no real Cause, it was never really Just.

Non Stop Bad Images

Negative Coverage assured that in future American wars the first casualty will continue to be The Truth as the media is kept further away from whats going on. The American media really hasn’t had the same sort of freedom to cover war they had during Vietnam since.#2- Desert Storm

Tale of the Tape-

One despot invades the land of another. The United States decides to split hairs and make a global power play for oil by calling one worse than the other.

Its just about that simple.

Ad Hoc nation Iraq, a hangover from World War 1, was never the greatest idea. Saddam Hussein was an aspiring low level Hitler with about as much military capacity. With his World War Two-like army he fought Iran in a disturbing re-run in some ways of the FIRST World War. With American help he had more or less won that one. Huge casualties and chemical weapons use by both sides.

And Saddam at this point likely really does have some more pretty bad WMD’s, courtesy of America.

He had the capacity to slap a chemical weapon to a SCUD, essentially a World War Two V-2 buzzbomb (or a huge bottle rocket) and hit the Israeli’s. This would have had everyone at war.

Early 1990’s Sadaam

At first glance the chance a lot of Americans get killed looked pretty high going in.

But it didn’t go down that way.

At first, before Gulf War Syndrome is known, it seems a walkover victory for the United States.Positives–

Probably None.

The ‘easy win’ is intoxicating and sets a dangerous precedent.

Saddam WAS a horrible tyrant who was trying to be just like Hitler; but his regime survives the war and keeps acting horribly.

Honors/Accolades–

Dubbed “The Nintendo War”; very few combat losses; scared the fuck out the rest of the world for a decade with terrifying Gun Camera pics presented by Norman Schwartzkopf; CNN becomes major provider of news with newly enhanced reputation; Will probably eventually be called Gulf War One.

Notable Negatives–

A New Found American Arrogance would lead to future conflicts by creating stupid fiction that we could fight anyone painlessly, by remote control whenever we felt like it.

A new Generation of Domestic Terrorists (Timothy McVeigh)

Then there’s Gulf War Syndrome.

The Government didn’t react to Gulf War Syndrome right. It kicked the can cynically waiting for as few litigants to be alive when the case ended as possible. They had taken a similar approach to the Vietnam vet’s they poisoned with Agent Orange, but seeing it coming didn’t make it any less wrong.

It seems Gulf War Syndrome had at least 2 causes. Some cases were due to the poisoning of American soldiers through exposure (by proximity) to massive amounts of radioactive ordinance. Then Saddam blew up as many oil wells as he could to cover his retreat. This ended up subjecting many to a chemical Hell in Kuwait and Southern Iraq as they dealt with an environmental attack. About 100,000 Gulf War Veterans seem to have been effected.

The government still has a lot to do about Gulf War Syndrome before they can even pretend they tried to ‘make it right.”

Not to be forgotten- Motivating one Usama binLaden to attack the United States with unprecedented Success on 9-11. He had his eyes on the Saudi’s up to then.

A final negative, if it’s really any kind of negative- Maybe the worst musical soundtrack of any war. There was just no really good song associated with this war if there’s any song that really represents it at all. In other words – there’s no “Paint it Black” or “The End” to symbolize this war. There were some forgettable songs by country artists and a protest song of sorts from the Stones, but this was the era of ‘Hammer Time’ and Motley Crue going on musically. Not a lot there.

So if there is a song; maybe something by Faith No More?#1 Operation Iraqi Freedom

Tale of the Tape–

In a speech that scared the fuck out of the world and the US Congress George W Bush probably lied when he made the case of a defensive war against Iraq. None the less we kick off another round of hostilities with Iraq starting in 2003 and ‘ending’ in 2011.

It didn’t hurt that Bill Clinton had continued George H Bush’s policy toward Sadaam. Bubba punished Iraq with sanctions and air power for his entire presidency.

In fact Iraq’s actual “Army” was just an inconvenience at this point (at least until they take off their uniforms and come back as terrorists). Sadaam was basically a gangster whose thugs were nominally military, endlessly fighting (now smaller) World War Two type engagements against a rebellious region of his nation or Iran.

This time going in we had a perception we might just get off easy.

It didn’t go down like that.

Second Coming

All for Nothing: No WMD’s: Lots of casualties.

Americans turned on and started hating George W Bush and the bad influence that was vice president Cheney.

We ended up with a new generation of Neglected Fucked Up Vets who will need a lot of help; A Tarnishing of Americas World Reputation. There was Mass Brutalization of American Troops in this war. In other words a lot of people saw a lot of horrible things.

It degeberated to a pointless attempt to unify what WILL be THREE COUNTRIES sooner or later – Kurdistan, Iraq and Western Iran. Pouring Billions of Dollars into a black hole of non accountability.

Currently under Re-Branding by Bush Apologists remaking it as a war to free the Iraqi People from a Tyrant. Ironically most of their lives are probably worse. The Office of President of the United States again tarnished by yet another Bush having yet another pointless war against Iraq.Positives-

Recent developments cast doubt on George W Bush being the worst ever president. Its now remembered as a time of calm and order in America despite a bad foreign policy. (This is probably only good news for George W Bush)

Cheney remains despised.

America never really buys in to the war. Iraq was stage management and opinion manipulation at its worst and most obvious.

Sadaam was, still, a horrible tyrant who wanted to be just like Hitler. He was also a fairly effective World War Two level army leader and would have kept on causing problems and committing atrocities. It’s still up in the air whether or not its a better world without him. Its possible there never would have been an ISIS had he just been left alone.

Honors/Accolades-

Shockingly, the most Obscure War since 1898 due to active ambivalence by the public and deception by the government. “Embedding” journalists with Military Units ensures complete vacuum of information In fact we’re still waiting to see more than 15 minutes worth of footage from this war. What war video there was was thanks mostly to Chelsea Manning releasing videos like the infamous video of a BBC crew being accidentally blown away by a US Attack Helicopter complete with “we kill people all day” commentary from the crew and ground control.

Maybe the best movie for this war would be Green Zone or Hurt Locker.

People seem to care more about Afghanistan.Notable Negatives–

well there’s this for starters-

The “Mission Accomplished” fiasco that preceded 90% of the casualties. The fact that it ultimately failed and was mocked was an unintended positive. It was a disgrace though. Trying to sell war as easy and already won prematurely really backfired on Bush. People didn’t really trust him anymore. Also; lasting distrust of the Government so extreme that it has spawned the Conspiracy Industry (like Truthing and Info Wars).

All it proved was that Life can be better and safer under a brutal dictator than after a US “Liberation”

America was revealed as the Worlds Angry Warrior Cop; beating confessions out of our captured enemies while stalking armored.

There was a new generation of Domestic Terrorists (like the scumbag Tsarnaev Boys). And sadly, a new generation of completely fucked up Vets who will need help for decades.

Widespread unhappiness that this war had even happened took hold and was a leading issue in the 2016 presidential campaign. Many blamed it for ISIS. Hilary Clinton could count her voting in favor of military action among her many problems in her losing bid to be president. Trump seems to have somewhat benefited from presenting himself as opposed to the war.

Also, a wildly toxic can of deep Islamophobia gets opened up and begins creeping at the edges of America. It’s now becoming a recurring talking point in politics.

Disturbingly, it’s probably turning 9-11 into something of a success if you consider the attacks were ultimately aimed at making us more intolerant and religious. Well done, bin Laden you dick.

Military Contractor Blackwater (provider of Mercenaries), run by brother of Trump’s Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos comes to prominence. They do some pretty awful things in Iraq and the locals despised them more than even the US military. Currently their owner is under suspicion of being something of a Russian Spy. This was a hangover no one saw coming. So throw in “rise of private miltaries and illegal intelligence services”. This is still getting worse as I update.

We’re STILL suffering the after effects of this war. We may still be too close to really appreciate just how much it’s stressed and changed America.

What do you think our most pointless war was? The polls are open and comments are enabled!

For the post on how Trump’s deep misunderstanding of George S Patton is shaping current military and domestic policy click here

[Authors note-This post about the times we should have thought twice and NOT gone to war. It’s not my goal to diminish those who fought on either side. Even the worst military misadventure features heroes and acts of valor. That’s for a different post.]

November 2018; as his stock continued to rise in the face of even more inept presidents, George HW Bush passed away from natural causes earlier today.

While in his time he was considered to be our second stupidest president his own son and of course BLOTUS Donald Trump have exceeded his ineptitude and pushed him into the ranks of “mediocre president”

Below is the original satirical obituary from SEVEN years ago, when it looked like he had little time left. He rallied back and lived to get accused of “Me-Too-ing” a couple of women, so he stayed current and maybe never really respected women.

Former President George HW Bush, Dead at 88

Former president George HW Bush passed away today, partially from Embarrassment upon getting what sources are calling “absolute genetic proof” he was in fact the father of subsequent president George W Bush.

“He had always suspected I had an affair because W was so slow;” a tearful former first lady Barbara Bush was quoted as saying. Close friend William Bennett was reached at the Sands Casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey, where he swears he isn’t under house arrest for nonpayment of gambling debts. “He had always held out hope George W was someone else’s son in spite of the obvious physical resemblance.” Bennett said. “He was a proud man and he never could come to terms with the mistake he made not punching his wife harder in the belly while she was pregnant with W. I guess knowing for sure W is his was the final insult. Let’s face it, any man would have felt the same.” Bennett had learned of the former presidents passing when he asked why the flags at Churchill Downs were at Half Mast while he was placing online bets.

In his book “Blackmail Photo’s, My Time Serving in the Reagan Administration”, former Secretary of the Treasury Donald Reagan said of the senior Bush,”Whenever W would come around George would make a point of saying he had barely been in town when the kid

hot granddaughter Jenna is considered one of George HW Bush’s greatest accomplishments as 1/2 of the hottest first daughter team ever.

was conceived and if it was his he”probably should have shot that one into the sink.” Bush, known for naming his penis after prominent Olympians, also occasionally claimed radioactive alien remains he came into contact with as CIA director (under our 4th most failed president of the last 50 years, fellow Republican Gerald R Ford) had “fucked up all my little Mark Spitz’s for awhile.”

He cited a time travel paradox as the reason he was able to retroactively create a birth defect in a son who already 20 years old and working towards his first DUI at the time the encounter occurred. When asked if he was upset someone else may have made love to his wife Bush would often fork his fingers in front of his mouth, flick his tongue rapidly, wink and say “at least somebody is!”

Word has it he had been watching Fahrenheit 9-11 while huffing oxygen when in a massive attack of common sense he realized he had been saved by his own penis from the title of “Most Failed President of the last 50 Years not named Richard Nixon”. The Medical Examiner has listed “Embarrassment” as the initial cause of death.

UPDATE- The ‘election’ of Donald Trump has moved George HW Bush to 4th worst president

In addition to other things i will delve into when he actually DOES die is the fact that George the 1st was a much braver pilot than his son and a slightly better one than John McCain.

Unlike his son, Bush 1 loved war in a personal hands on way as well as killing by remote control. A dedicated servant of darkness, war and death were near and dear to Bush Sr’s heart. He happily served in the Pacific Theater during World War 2 where he was notably shot down and sadly saved by a submarine that was unfortunately nearby, sealing America’s fate and blowing a great chance to let the Japanese save us from two terrible presidents in one fell swoop. Damn their terrible marksmanship!

We were literally like less than a foot from never having to deal with either of these guys. It makes what happened to Little Joe Kennedy all the more tragic. This in and of itself justifies the dropping of both atomic bombs despite the Japanese begging us to accept their surrender for three months previous.

a gleeful George HW Bush showing he wasn’t embarrassed that he had already been shot down twice. Note the Devil Tail on the “Barbara III logo! Imagine being this guys tail gunner? Probably the inspiration for the Star Wars Character ‘Dak’.

During the war Bush passed his time cheating at poker, fantasizing about new ways to fail at his combat missions and how to lose more crew members in the torpedo bomber he helmed. Unlike fellow Navy Pilot and insane right wing war loving maniac John McCain he almost always landed on the aircraft carrier without damaging his plane. Occasionally he would come back having actually completed his missions. Despite incompetence, poor vision and an inability to read a map sheer love of war was enough to motivate Bush to rain death and destruction down upon the helpless civilians in the final month of the war when Japanese resistance was almost nil. “Sure we bombed hospitals, orphanages and old folks homes, but sometimes we would hit a factory and really take it to the Tojo’s!” he wrote home to his mother in 1945. In the same letter he enclosed the severed ear of a kamikaze pilot whose body Bush had taken custody of after the attack. He promised “more to come, I’ve really been reading the heck out of them taxidermy books you an pa sent me.”

In other letters home he would recount combat experiences. To his then 8 year sister Bush wrote,”They look like ants running away from me and that’s sort of how i think of them. I have never enjoyed anything in my life so much as the smell of their roasting flesh as I fly back to the carrier over the devastation and burned out buildings that I helped to destroy for America. I sleep like a baby at night knowing I am doing the work of the Lord. The only thing that scares me is the thought that someone might invent a bomb so powerful that it could blow up an entire city and end this turkey shoot. God I feel alive today!”

Obsessed with hatred for his Asiatic enemies, Bush read an article in Life Magazine about the Flying Tigers but was so drunk on coconut hooch he thought the Japanese were afraid of Demons instead of sharks. The next morning a hung over Bush painted up his plane, Beautiful Babs, like a gigantic Satanic Bat with blood dripping from its fangs. Felton Carmichael, an African American Steward and anti aircraft gunner who served with Bush remembered him as a profoundly racist rank puller whose twisted love of war disgusted his comrades. “He loved them fat girls,” Carmichael recalled, desperately searching for positive things to say about his former comrade in arms. He recounted how, drunk and flush with money won cheating at poker, a jubilant Bush once engaged him in a conversation about the perils of combat. “He pulled out his wallet and after he made sure to flash a wad of hundreds he pulled out a picture of his future wife and said ‘Would you fear death if you had THIS waiting for you at home?’ He really was let down when the war ended,” recalled Carmichael. “Not just because he couldn’t kill people all day anymore, we all missed that part, but because he had survived and would have to go home and fuck that horrible monster. Lotta us survivors had that kind of guilt. I think a part of his soul died that day.”When asked if he was put off by Bush’s overt racism Carmichael nodded his head in accord saying,”He put me at ease with a lot of antisemitic jokes. I figured he hated Jews so much they must’ve sent him to the Pacific so he wouldn’t switch sides.”

When the war ended Bush had earned the Overseas Service Medal, the Air Medal, and a commendation for ingenuity when he made a low pass over a schoolyard of Japanese Children and used his planes propeller blades to decapitate them after expending all his ammunition on a Buddhist Shrine and Monastery.

By the wars ens he had taken off for 58 combat missions (and landed 23 times). Of the dozens of men to serve in Bush’s torpedo plane crew only the very last one survived the war (he voted for Dukakis). All the rest were lost at sea when Bush would have them bail out so he would not run out of fuel.

“I wasn’t afraid to die,” said Bush,”Were I in their position I would have done the same thing. Imagine if that aircraft and pilot weren’t able to kill more people the next day? We were at war!” lost in the moment he continued,”You can always train another tail gunner, but good pilots? Well, that’s a different story. I didn’t do it for me, I did it so America could Kill more people.” As always when speaking of his passionate love of war his nasally whining voice stood in stark contrast to his tough words.

Though they broke his heart by ending the war he loved so much, as president George H W Bush showed a softer side and would come to love nuclear weapons. Had he been re-elected he had planned to nuke Vietnam, Japan and Canada for an inaugural fireworks show. After Bill Clinton took office he spent most of the first day talking Bush into giving up the nuclear launch codes. Weeks later Bush was still calling a then deposed Gorbachev and threatening to “nuke his red Ivan ass!” In 1997 Gorbachev told the BBC,”I would try to tell him, ‘George, neither of us have that kind of power anymore.’ Then he would usually start weeping and lament he had wasted his chance to use the worlds biggest nuclear arsenal. This went on for several months. Whether he kept calling after I changed the number I just can’t tell you.”

After the war Bush tried to gain work as a prison executioner and later as an undertaker so he could be surrounded by death all the time. Sadly he had no talent for these pursuits and turned to politics.

super fucking hot Jenna Bush

His reversal on “Voodoo Economics” upon insinuating his way into being Assassination Insurance for Ronald Reagan and his infamously insincere “Read my Lips, No New Taxes” statements defined this walking contradiction of a president who would sometimes look like he knew exactly what he was doing and the next moment would puke on the president of Japan. The president of Japan deserved it though, because as noted earlier, the poor marksmanship of the Imperial Japanese Army caused the entire world 12 years of suffering under 2 different George Bush’s.

Bush leaves behind two super hot Granddaughters that I will find provocative pictures of for his official post death obituary. We will talk extensively of the Bush Legacy of Economic failure, Unnecessary Wars, Crushing of the Middle Class and Whopping Lies as numerous as his references to his laughable “Thousand Points of Light Foundation”, a presidential charity so ill defined Historians have chosen to largely ignore it rather than attempt to make any sense of it.

Bush’s other granddaughter Barbara is also smoking hot and enhances her beauty by always wearing a Kristen Stewart like “Total Fucking Bitch” expression.

Undeservedly elected president based on simply being Assassination Insurance for Ronald Reagan he was the very first Pope of the hilariously misguided Republican Cargo Cult. American’s will remember him for his spelling ace vice president, his hot granddaughters, the relative who fucked the maid and created Jorge P Bush, his losing in a landslide to scandal ridden and beatable Bill Clinton and,perhaps most notably, despite being a one termer, being responsible for fully half of all Bush family presidential election wins.

His insincere laugh, sissy voice and effeminate way of threatening other world leaders will also figure greatly into his legacy. Though he claimed to hail from Texas, probably to offset his obvious stupidity, he had the nattering annoying voice worthy of a Masshole Red Sox Season Ticket Holder, which in fact he was. In later years the older Bush was often seen at sporting events supporting unlovable teams like the Houston Astro’s and the Texas Rangers. Like all true assholes, he was a big Dallas Cowboys fan. At many games he would appear as a sober counterpart to his unbelievably intoxicated son with other notable assholes like Jerry Jones and Nolan Ryan, one of baseball’s least worthy Hall of Famer’s. When asked about Ryan Bush once remarked,”I like a man who can walk 200 batters in a season and still make the Hall of Fame, he’s an example to all mediocre people everywhere that if you never really try but keep showing up you might just fluke your way into some kind of success. I see myself in him.” Even more irritating, because he spent so much time in New England, he also got to enjoy Tom Brady’s spotlight turn as God’s Man Crush and winning a bunch of Superbowl’s too. Thankfully he was never associated with the New York Yankees, who have enough conservative assholes in the stadium now that seats are an arm and a leg now anyway.

When George the 1st finally does shuffle off this mortal coil we will also have a good laugh at the hilarious fact that the GOP is actually considering trying to make Jeb Bush into George III. Good luck with that one tea baggers! he will never be president. Chelsea Clinton has a better chance.

George HW Bush has now been replaced by Jimmy Carter as second least successful living President and Dan Quayle now moves into second place behind Dick Cheney as second most hated vice president. When reached for comment Carter simply said, “He always had the worst breath and cheated at golf.”

The former president will lie in state at the front gate of Fenway Park where he personally witnessed the first Red Sox World Series Game ever. The sleeves of his suit will be cut off so mourners can see Bush Senior’s extensive collection of tattoo’s, some of which date back to his military service in the Second World War. Bush also had a large rendering of the album cover of Iron Maiden’s “Killers” on his right forearm. he would often point to his tattoo, blow on his fist and say “the Maiden tattoo is for when I arm wrestle that Gorbachev guy!”

“I only wish we could bury him face down,” said son Herb, the only Bush with the decency to spare the country a political career of his own,”he had an awesome tat of the KISS “Dressed to Kill” album across his entire back he would show everyone he met!” The former president’s son reminisced about some aspects of his father the public may not have previously known. “My Dad loved music, man. I mean, he really loved it. System of a Down, Lamb of God, Machinehead, sometimes the Deftones, Ozzy, Maiden, Judas Priest, plenty of Black Sabbath and of course Mercyful Fate. Some pussies like Chris Christie pretend to like Springsteen so they can score points with the electorate. Not my Dad. He refused to even have Bruce at the White House. He just put on my moms dress, a wig and some old shades I think Jackie O left behind and went to see Slayer instead. That was my old man, he loved his Metal. Whenever I hear Ronnie James Dio I’m gonna get a little choked up and think of my Dad.” Herb then flashed his “Devil Horns” hand sign and wiped a tear from his eye.

George W Bush finished what his father started- pointlessly alienating every single person in the Middle East

A faithful vassal of his Lord and Master Satan, Bush’s body is expected to explode in a ball of fire in roughly 6 days as he descends into Hell where he is expected to be offered a management position.

Notable George HW Bush trivia facts include – He had the second lowest college grades of any president when he took office. After his son took office HW had the third lowest grades of any president. He spent a larger percentage of his presidency on vacation than any president other than his own son. He threw America’s Fourth Most Pointless War in the Ass kicking we call Desert Storm. In Desert Storm we freed the citizens of a totalitarian government from the clutches of another totalitarian government in the name of Freedom so their original, legitimate oppressors, could get on with the legitimate repression. In the process he set up a pointless rivalry with Sadaam Hussein and his third rate thug army and pissed off a

In war he fought like a man, in baseball, well, he threw like a girl.

former CIA trained anti Soviet operative, Osama bin Laden. Both of these things would cause major problems in the years ahead. Among his greatest accomplishments was creating 100,000 wounded warriors who had to spend almost 20 years pleading with the country they served for medical help with the now confirmed malady know as “Gulf War Syndrome.” His pointless use of military force at the slightest provocation ensure him a war mongering legacy boasting a disregard for human life as heinous as Andrew Jackson’s.

A private ceremony is planned for this Sunday at the Dallas First Church of Satan,Reformed, just steps from Dealey Plaza. “Dad wanted the services to be near Dealey Plaza” said an even more intellectually inhibited than usual George W. Bush, (or possibly Will Ferrell, there’s no being sure), “he said he had done some of his best work there.”

He was 89 years old.

UPDATE 6-12-13- George H W Bush celebrated his 89th birthday today in defiance of all predictions. Kudos, but we’re still ready for when you go to your reward!

Where Empires Go To Die
In the decade plus since United States Forces effectively invaded and toppled the outlaw Taliban Regime in Afghanistan nothing has been accomplished and the toll continues to rise. With NATO scheduled to leave in 2014 pretty much one way or another the elephant in the room is-“Why Wait?”—A decade wasted
Now into a second decade of strife the roots of the conflict; namely the degeneration of Afghanistan into a veritable perpetual state of civil war, are still pushing fruit from the rocky soil. The Taliban seem to be everywhere and

America is currently slated to leave Afghanistan by the end of 2014.

Hamid Karzai’s whole life has been one long audition to be a Star Trek Villain.

nowhere. They remain a threat and hard numbers on their membership are simply unavailable. These vicious goons will do anything for money, place no value on lives of themselves or any others and live off and outdated and widely disavowed interpretation of Islam. Only in a dystopia like Afghanistan could such a movement thrive.
Where do these fanatics come from? Doubtless the lack of education, in particular for girls, plays a role. In 2002 it was estimated that less than half of all males and more than 3/4ths of all female Afghani’s had any education at all. It sports the ignominious distinction of having the highest illiteracy rate in Asia. Illiteracy makes it impossible for anyone to research anything first hand. Analytical skills are never formally developed by professional educators. The end result would inevitably a person whose world view was dependent on those who can read having an enormously disproportionate amount of influence. In Afghanistan an Islamic version of the Westboro Baptist Church would be considered relatively moderate, at least in its actions. Imagine a nation where outside the capital almost no one can read looking to a few mullahs, who roughly equate to radical Apocalypse Preachers, for all their information, especially religious matters. A nonstop highly localized but unified anti American philosophy is constantly being espoused. Unlike Apocalypse Preachers elsewhere, they have some ‘proof’ of their visions. This proof is what the United States Military has termed “Collateral Damage” mixed regularly breaking atrocity stories and a stark cultural difference which leaves both sides in perpetual shock. Mutual understanding and acceptance still appear to be out of reach and qualify as mere wishful thinking. The Occupation in and of itself engenders a hateful attitude towards NATO. The populace at large, whatever their education level or analytical abilities, will not risk defying the Taliban. The Taliban have burnished their reputation as murderous thugs who can terrorize effectively even if their numbers are small.–Green on Blue and the overt failure of Nation Building
The Kabul Government installed by George W Bush in 2002 has a reputation for ineffective corrupt actions second to none in the world. Good billions are thrown after bad into a roaring furnace of pointlessness.
The entire approach of Nation Building for Afghanistan proceeds from a false assumption- That anyone in Afghanistan WANTS a nation. Afghanistan is a nation that can be viewed as a collection of fiefdoms run by an overlord of sorts. This the core weakness of the Nation Building approach and the greatest ally of the insurgency.
The gains of the NATO Coalition have been limited and may be of no benefit to NATO’s mission. Literacy rates have surely risen, but the kind of dent this has made in the Afghani world view is not quantifiable. It is a fair assertion to imagine a slowly dwindling but still unbelievably high rate of illiteracy may take a generation or more to have any impact. While admirable, educating the Afghani’s has apparently yielded very little fruit. A generation that was of kindergarten age to the age where a American would be graduating High School has apparently not resulted in the hoped for sudden and acute emergence of Common Sense and aversion to violence. Attacks on Afghan girls by Taliban aligned extremists are a sustained and heartbreaking thread of tragedy running through the entire American War.
The biggest failure of the Occupation is undoubtedly the Afghan Army and Security Forces. These entities simply can NOT be trusted. They are easily corruptible and their porous ranks seem easily penetrated by operatives of the Taliban and al Qaeda. The insurgency has grown and mutated to take advantage of this.
Green on Blue Attacks, where Afghani security forces turn their weapons on their

The illustrious Afghan Army. Seriously, with friends like these guys…?

American counterparts became an almost daily reality before NATO Forces ended joint patrol and training operations with the Afghan Army this past summer.
Green on Blue is such a potent weapon, and so impossible to guard against that they have changed the way the Occupation is implemented and perceived. The Afghan Army and Security Forces are the very definition of failure. They are a dangerous and random element. One can only imagine illiteracy amongst it ranks is prevalent. This is a key aspect why the Iraqi Occupation was a comparative success. Iraq had a high level of education and an abundance of college educated members of their society. Despite regional differences which may one day result in a fragmenting of the current Iraq, there was a sense, spread by state run media, that Iraq had a National Identity. A degree of cohesiveness made it one country, at least to the point where perception and reality overlapped. Brutal oppression was embodied in one man, a hated and reviled dictator. Sadaam Hussein’s execution was a unifying moment of the sort the Afghani’s never had.
In Afghanistan fiefdom was and is the norm. No one evil dictator was available to embody the nation’s frustration. While surely oppressed, Afghan’s never had a modern frame of reference to show them a better life. TV, electricity, air

conditioning and other modern conveniences taken for granted just don’t exist.
Enter NATO. Killing off one warlord after another seemed to be producing results. One valley at a time was occupied and a concerted attempt to bring the 21st century to that fiefdom would be undertaken. This did little more than create targets. Power Stations can be blown up faster than they are built. A few brutal acts of terrorism can intimidate an entire village if not the nation at large into shunning education for reasons that are readily apparent. Being an illiterate live person still beats being a well-read corpse or being doused in kerosene and set afire. No amount of Baywatch re-runs, if they are even available, will change this simple fact of life- In Afghanistan seeking an education is an impediment, especially for girls, to staying alive.–Two minutes and 22 months to Midnight-
NATO’s mission is set to wrap up by the end of 2014. For America, our military and the Afghani’s this can’t come soon enough.

The looming question- what will these next 2 years produce to legitimize America’s longest war? Education has been a failure and has played into the hands of the terrorists we were originally there to fight. The Nation Building experiment is a failure of monumental proportions. The Kabul Government is a front for corruption led by an unqualified bi-polar madman. The mullah’s still hold sway over the majority of public opinion. The Afghan Army is a dangerous and uncontrollable rogue element that can NOT be trusted in any way. Cultural change never materialized, one Koran burned by mistake or a culturally insensitive act or remark regularly result in mass civil unrest that gets NATO troops killed and injured.
Staying will not change any of this. Osama bin Laden is dead. Killed by roughly 60 highly trained commandos in a raid that could have taken place in 2002 and spared the United States all the Blood and Treasure that is still being wasted trying to force the 21st Century onto a rural and agrarian society still dependent on Opium as its biggest

The Taliban’s cash generating renewable resource. Opium

cash crop. Opium is a renewable resource. Stability and legitimacy are not.
Kabul is doomed. Afghanistan should be effectively quarantined. It has little to offer the outside world. Westerners, even armed, trained masses of soldiers, simply aren’t safe and clearly not accepted. It’s a medieval society barely past the Dark Age that they could fall back into at any time. Anger is a renewable resource easily harvested by the influential radicals who hold sway outside the capital.
The obvious comparisons are the American War for Independence and Vietnam. A far off Imperial power fights an unpopular, endless low intensity war where casualties mount despite success in the few real battles fought. Lone wolf operations are infinitely possible, sniping and IED’s are not preventable. So far it seems by simply refusing to give up the insurgents have taken control of the conflict.
There’s no reason to stay. Comparative figures for how much tax money per capita is spent by the United States per Afghani versus US Citizen are unavailable but would surely be eye opening and may well show that average American has benefitted less from the taxes they pay than the Afghani’s we pay to protect and force democracy on. It’s a safe bet the Afghani’s have seen more. America’s economy is tanking, the entire world is spinning plates to avoid Financial Apocalypse. Afghanistan has been a blood soaked money pit. The solution- we should leave tomorrow. No transition, no draw down. Leave.
No case can be made for staying. Everything that needed to be done, killing and capturing the Murderer’s behind 9-11, is complete. Osama bin Laden swims with the fishes. Every single motive to stay beyond that has failed. This is textbook Mission Creep.
There is no dishonor in immediate withdrawal. The wasted years must come to an end. The Dystopia cannot be fixed. In Afghanistan things will be upside down until

The last chopper out of Saigon. Will the Afghan War end as badly?

they themselves decide otherwise. This is the time to leave, lest the final images from our longest war be like those of the Vietnam fiasco. That war was summed up in one picture. The images of a heavily overburdened Huey helicopter struggling into the air from the roof of the United States Embassy. It’s an image of failure. Staying any longer serves no purpose beyond stoking the furnaces of the War Pig Corporations with more blood money.
We should run like Hell. –The Brutalization of our soldiers and loss of our Military Professionalism
Fighting a 15 year war has not been easy on the military. This is the sort of thing that can turn even the most even keeled person into a homicidal maniac. The obvious cases, like the attack on Afghan civilians by SSgt Robert Bales are so horrible they numb the mind. How a man who grew up in the midlands of Ohio

Ssgt Robert Bales looking very detail oriented

could one day find himself building a funeral pyre of woman and children he had murdered shows how far the military has been stretched.
Consider as well murdering coward Major Nidal Hasan. Hasan showed open contempt for the country whose uniform he was somehow allowed to wear. Apparently too incompetent to be a surgeon he was apparently re-tasked as a shrink. Rather than showing compassion and using his medical training to help

Dress however you want; but this look at the base PX could be considered something of a red flag. being a bad soldier was the real problem but this guy wasn’t hiding anything

them with PTSD and other pitfalls of return to a nation that only realized we were at war when CIA Director and ex-General David Petraeus’ affair went viral. Despite this, and other bizarre incidents where Hasan seemed like a malevolent version of Klinger, desperately trying to avoid doing his military duty by dressing in drag, or in this case hardcore Muslim religious garb; not much was done in the way of checking this guy out. While within his rights to dress however he wants, this is not exactly the kind of thing your average soldier wears to pick up groceries at the base PX. Add to that the breakdown in screening and the massive labor gap the military deals with every day bridging the gap between the do-able and the necessary. There were no shortage of complaints regarding Hassan’s dishonorable and outright weird behavior, the fact he was a self-radicalized Muslim extremist was just barely popping onto the radar when Hasan went operational and betrayed his medical oath, military oath and the Pledge of Allegiance in a trifecta of treacherous

Bradley manning as a civilian

Consider lastly Private Bradley Manning. Manning is perhaps the most intriguing and polarizing figure in all of America’s 21st century wars. History will likely judge him more kindly than he can expect at his imminent court martial. Was manning ever a good candidate for high security work where he would see things that would shock the mind and perhaps even poison the soul? Now that we know the results the answer screams back “NO!” The idea that a 20 years old private, the lowest rank in the military, could have access to top secret databases and be allowed to bring CD’s capable of re-recording video and downloading a great deal of damaging information is mind blowing. Where’s Psy-Ops when you need them? Manning was not prepared for his job and those who assigned him to it share some of the blame.

Replicants=Drones? just a thought

It doesn’t seem like it would have taken a Blade Runner level personality scan to know this kid could have done a better job in another MOS or maybe even wasn’t the best fit for the military in the first place.
It is an open question whether Manning can make a credible assertion that he simply refused to comply with what amounted to an Unconstitutional Order. It seems a long shot. Manning will likely do considerable jail time. The information he provided, perhaps naively, to Julian Assaange and the Wikileaks people (who no longer seem all that crazy about Assange), was devastating and is akin to the Pentagon papers and the Uncounted Enemy Scandal of these wars.
It is a military filled with competent soldiers who are dedicated professionals, this goes without saying. However the sheer weight of numbers needed to prosecute war a half a world away has resulted in a rift between the ideal or even acceptable soldier what passes for acceptable in the face of the need to accomplish vital tasks, even support tasks, in a situation that has been apparently being done on an ad hoc basis for a decade and change.
Afghanistan may not be able to solve its own problems, but 13 years of American help hasn’t changed much. The Karzai regime is a disgraceful corrupt sham and the continual shameful waste of our blood and treasure there needs to end before the scheduled withdrawal in 2014.

Conservatism revolving around the 1980’s and Ronald Reagan in an idealized, ritualized and unrealistic way. The influence of this aspect of modern American Conservatism is palpable yet there has been very little discussion of it.

The classic historical Cargo Cult refers to a religious phenomenonthat arose on the isolated pacific islands used as bases by various militaries during the Second World War. The native islanders in places like Papua, New Guinea had not had much contact with the outside world. Their ways of viewing the day to day world included a good dose of the

paranormal. If someone got sick, perhaps a curse had been put upon them. Flood? Famine? Perhaps the villagers aren’t living up to the standards of their pantheon of deities. A thumbnail description would be that they fed the Volcano to pacify the gods,who were surely a bit crazy.
After the Second World War began in the Pacific the lives of the native islanders were subject to massive culture shock. Literally overnight and literally out of the sky in the form of shiny silver airplanes as well as great iron beasts from the sea came the mid-20th century. None of the previous limited contacts with outsiders provided a frame of reference for what transpired on their islands, their very world, as emerged over the weeks following arrival of troops from both sides of the conflict.

To these isolated natives the idea that an internal combustion engine would spin gears and operate pistons to spin a propeller to power a vehicle capable of carrying goods or people was inconceivable. Imagine bringing a flashlight, cigarette lighter and .9mm pistol via time traveling helicopter to Dark Ages Europe to get any sort of grip on this.
To the natives of islands such as those of New Guinea the planes were not

–Members of the John Frum cult in New Guinea imitating American Soldiers in their “ritual”

machines but great beasts akin to hollow metal dragons. They were summoned from the sky by rituals at a holy temple, or as we would call it, a Military Airfield. The “rituals” were the day to day operations of the base. Waiving in incoming planes with flags and lighting runways. Group s of identically clad men marching in formation, chanting magic words (read: military cadences) and sometimes even firing their bang sticks!!

In the wake of the Second World War these isolated bases were mostly abandoned and life, for the natives, returned to ‘normal’. But it was a ‘New Normal’. They had become accustomed to the gleaming aluminum dragons regularly summoned by the clergy (read: US Navy Sea Bees) with the sacred relics (read: radios, landing lights and parades). No longer were the great beasts from the air and sea disgorging the material goods they now so desired. Gone was the supply of

A replica Second World War plane used in John Frum Movements rituals. Is the GOP Elephant now an equivalent Trojan Horse of Willful Blindness?canned goods, textiles and the giant crates that had seemed like enormous wooden eggs that birthed

a smug Mitt Romney exulting in the opportunity to make hay off Ambassador Chris Stevens and others even as they were dying for their country. Only the 47% comment hurt him more

the coveted “cargo”.
In a turn of events still being studied by sociologists and historians, the Cargo Cults emerged. The natives formed into cults of sorts and imitated in ritualistic fashion the actions of the men who had summoned the great beats and cargo from the sky. Coconuts were fashioned into radio headsets, bamboo control towers were created. Uniformly dressed men marched in ritual manners similar to the military drills they had seen under the mistaken belief that by simply doing so they themselves would please the gods of the sky and bring down the shiny metal beasts filled with goodies. These beliefs were personified in the form of an image of an American World War 2 Sailor, frequently portrayed as African American, known as “John Frum”. Think of him as a sort of Santa-Jesus type. British occupied areas developed similar cults based on an idealized perception of Prince Phillip.
The John Frum Movement and Prince Phillip Societies still exist today in New Guinea. Despite the fact that these places slowly became less isolated and were slowly but steadily overtaken by rational explanations of the outside world some still cling to the Cargo Cult beliefs. In the case of the Prince Phillip society egotistical detachment from reality is shared by the object of their affection. Prince Phillip perhaps unwittingly, endorses the cult’s beliefs by sending gifts and autographs. This leads to the inevitable conclusion that what is really needed, by the prince and his worshipers, is some help handling a brutal but needed dose of reality. This need also applies to early 21st Century Tea party Republicans. Ritualized Reaganistic Worldview has become a meme accepted by most Republicans, albeit for the most part unknowingly.

The Gangster Planet featured in the Original Star Trek Episode “A Piece of the Action” is an illustration of a classic “Cargo Cult”. One of the shows most popular episodes and most Americans only glimpse at Cargo Cults

where an isolated planet had been exposed to 23rd century technology by earlier space travelers. When the Enterprise arrives a generation later they find an entire culture influenced by a book the first explorers from Earth left behind about 1920’s gangster culture in places like Chicago and New York. By looking, dressing and acting like the gangsters they read about the natives of Sigma Iota IV were attempting to make a great leap forward by throwing themselves feet first into imitating a society that had been outlined in book that to them seemed a blue print to the “cargo” they had seen accompanying the first earthmen they met, technology and abilities that would provide for worry free prosperity.
How does this apply to early 21st century American Conservatism? The Republican Party is now packed with under qualified ideologues who espouse an unrealistic image of a worry free past, in this case, the Go Go 1980’s. The images of John Frumm (a bastardization of “John From America”) and Prince Phillip have been replaced by an idealized, unrealistic image of Ronald Reagan. Like John Frumm, Ritual Reagan is a demi god who summoned “Cargo” (read: Worry free prosperity) through rituals that included sparring with the Russians, a somewhat narrow social view and an overemphasis on an extreme interpretation of “Christian” thought.
To one degree or another every single modern conservative is a member of a Reagan oriented Cargo Cult. The Cargo Cult mentality has threaded its way into every aspect of current Republican narrative.
The Cargo Cult Volcano God demands certain sacrifices be made lest it grow angry and erupt. Among other things, it demands ritual.
Repeated mawkish Ritualistic displays by Romney have so far done nothing to dispel the validity of the Cargo Cult Assertion.

Citizen Romney did everything he could to work the Cargo Cult crowd. As a result failure analysis has given way to willful ignorance on the right

During his chaotic and doomed 2012 campaign Romney seized upon every perceived advantage and this was no exception. It’s not a difficult role in its Ritualistic Form. There’s some passing physical resemblance, both coincidental and contrived between Romney and Reagan. Among these are their hair, approximate build and hypomanic personalities. Romney seemed to be smugly emitting what he seemingly thought was a subliminal puppet show where he played Ritualized Reagan. Pushing on the physical he layered on a veneer of the cold warrior aspect of Reagan by strapping on the coconut headphones of some sort of bamboo transmitter and sending pugilistic messages to the Russians, who were clearly NOT a threat to the United States in 2012. Another Ritual Reagan rain dance was over emphasizing the level of danger posed by Iran. While an outlaw nation and a sponsor of terrorism, the current sanctions and global shunning seem to be worth sticking worth for a while to most Americans who are leery of another American Ground War in an unstable part of the world.

I think in the last few weeks of the 2012 election Mitt Romney became a true believer in his own Reagan-ness; operating with the Ritualized Reagan approach as a default position on everything. It was a Franken-Ronnie with none of the warmth and conviction of the original. The “Cargo” aka the Go Go 80’s, can only be delivered by putting the Ritualized Reagan, that is Mitt Romney, in the White House. He can then summon the great gleaming beasts from the sky that birth the great wooden eggs filled with the canned goods (aka-worry free prosperity).
This Shackle of Defeat for Romney was exploited. The Ritualized Reagan that he pantomimes doesn’t square with the real Reagan. Reagan was confronting a real threat from Soviet Russians. Reagan was a culture warrior, but only after being a patriotic American type who believed in some practicality, compromise and some tolerance. When Reagan spoke of Libya that country was run by an evil dictator since deceased in fantastic fashion due directly to initiatives taken by the Cargo Cults hated “Anti-Reagan”, President Obama, who realistically could be argued is a truer heir to Reagan’s positions on Libya by doing so. Ritual Reagan is at his weakest on Libya.
Despite a display of unpresidential weakness best left behind in his bumbling and inept reactions to the 9-11 attacks in Libya, Romney revisited the issue at almost every opportunity. Was he doing this because his “Inner Reagan” simply knee jerks him into having to include comments about Libya into his rhetoric? It only hurt him. If someone has a better explanation for this obviously misguided attempt to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat on what any other candidate would have rightly moved on from please leave me a comment.
The “rank and file core base republicans’, (read: formerly disavowed extremists from the Wild Wild Allen West Wing of the party) show strong and prevalent evidence of Cargo Cult behavior in social media. They promoted Romney as a Pseudo Reagan “Mitt-siah” capable of summoning the all-important cargo planes. Romney’s one unquestioned credential, ruthless and unaccountable vulture capitalism, is a direct result of the unregulated excesses of the 1980’s and increases Romney’s credibilty as a worthy successor to Reagan. This is manifested best in his regulation hating approach to managing the economy. De-personalization and detachment from reality are evident in the Hoover era bootstrap “Rugged Individualism” that has become part of a negative feedback loop that convinces many Republicans they live in Bill Clinton’s proverbial “log cabin they built themselves”.

24 days after a huge election fail the Republicans STILL can’t figure out how they lost. The Romney Campaign, reduced to a one man show, continued for a couple of days after the defeat just so he could find a way to offend and denigrate people he had overlooked insulting earlier while he still had a modicum of relevance. Campaign staff also issued repeated out of touch statements that certainly seemed delusional to the point of strapping on coconut headphones. Take this as a sign that absolutely nothing has been learned through failure analysis. All indications are that many if not most Republican truly and strongly believe that if they just rain dance longer, faster and harder in preparation for the next election they can somehow avoid losing again in 2016. Their unrealistic Hypothesis-If they had just been more extreme, suppressed the vote more and passed more insane homophobic laws they are SURE they would have won instead of getting walloped by a 3 million votes margin in an Obama cakewalk.

Though some of the cult has sheered away out of fear of losing their seats these are mostly from Blue States and there is no sign of a massive shift to more pragmatic methods of winning elections on the part of rest of the Republican.

Now that Romney has gone from Mitts-siah to whipping boy Senators John McCain of Arizona and Lindsey Graham from Teabagistan jumped feet first into the Ritual Reagan role. Senator Kelly Ayote also tried to get in on this, but apparently if you’re a woman Ritual Reagan

just doesn’t work. Possibly because of another Republican Cult behavior,the Cult of Domesticity, which dictates that women should be ‘kept in their place.” This means that the self hating women of the Republican party are merely tuned out as having ‘too many opinions’ and/or ‘speak a little too much of their minds.” Only Sarah Palin has had any success pretending to be Ronald Reagan. This has routinely blown up on her. When this happens she hides behind her children like they’re Human Shields, basically defaulting to the Cult of Domesticity to deflect criticism by appearing in her ridiculous gun toting Reindeer maiming “Mama Grizzly” mode where she’s beyond reproach.

The Cargo Cult will likely thrive for years to come. In fact it may outlast the GOP itself as the party has lost four of the last 5 elections.

Next CIA director: General David Petraeus ????
It’s a little scary to see the Republican Cargo Cult ginning up headlines touting the idea that disgraced former CIA

‘Someone tell Petraeus he’s not Sean Connery’

Director; Gen. David Petraeus should have a chance to publicly screw up and have to quit in disgrace again. The idea of recycling the head of the Central Intelligence Agency just FEELS wrong. While his affair could have been survived had he chosen, he at least took the High Road and quit.
I can’t believe that out of nowhere suddenly Barack Obama by implication, had made a hire in the first place that was SO good that a small tempest or a glaring mistake wouldn’t destroy. In fact, people believe Obama should overlook the fact he has a resignation in hand from a spymaster so inept that he was unable to conceal a simple extramarital affair?
This is a ludicrous idea! First of all, the obvious- the man has a very important espionage job and he has terrible judgment and no command of subtlety. Shirley Sherrod was fired and then turned down the re-hire after the

administration balked over a creatively re-edited video where she seemed to make harsh statements. Van Jones was branded an anti-christ. Rahm Emanuel had to go back to run Chi-Town because he cursed too much. The presidents critics and Republican foes have been able to sort of have their way with “All the Presidents Men (and women)”.
Now, David Petraeus, a white male, is the offender and it’s a mistake to

George Lazenby is no longer the biggest joke in the espionage world

accept his letter of resignation? It would make the president look really bad, so of course, it’s being floated. Obama has been a much better political operator than anyone expected, so it’s more than likely he understands that he is being baited. He will appear patently ridiculous if he suddenly made a stand against common sense and made an exception for the first non brown guy who screwed something up.
In the first term this President was not all about loyalty and was careful, even skittish, about choosing his battles. In the last election he received something of a mandate and his flag has never flown higher than it is right now. He has what George W Bush called “political capital”.
The president seems less guns shy. This has been manifested in what has been so far the non-nomination of Doctor Susan Rice, currently the US ambassador to the United Nations. The president has not backed down on this and pointedly told his critics that anyone who he feels unfairly criticizes his people ‘would have a problem’ with him. This is a welcome change for Democrats, many of whom are a tad fed up with their guy getting bashed all the time and under-reacting to it. This was the first time he showed no reluctance to get angry. There was even some good push back against America’s designated angry old man, John McCain.
Even more perplexing then Tea Bagger Republicans fuming over the (currently) Non Nomination of Susan Rice is the obsession with politicizing the Benghazi attacks. Republicans like crazy Senator Lindsey Graham from Teabagistan have been shameless. Mitt Romney screwed the pooch first, nearly exalting over the tragedy even as the people he was mocking were dying for the country. Romney’s energetic, brisk and self-satisfied delivery reeked of ‘I have been praying someone would die horribly so I can exploit it’ sentiment and canned charm. He was exultant. The American people saw right through this and were sickened. It was the starting point of Mitt Romney’s final series of career killing inhuman gaffes that marked his entire failed campaign.
Benghazi is a great topic if you want to create Democrats though. Senator John McCain skips a briefing on the attacks so he can attack the administration for not having a briefing about the attacks. Another fail. It seems no one but the crazies in the non existent but influential astroturfing Tea Party and their “Cylons” in the Republican Party have any problem with the idea that no one could kept safe from an al Qaeda attack, anywhere. Not in New York, not in Benghazi. The American People also seem to understand that confusion ensues after a terrorist attack. In this case the confusion was after the fact, not willful ignorance before the fact, like 9-11. When compared with the only other president to deal with the new post 9-11 landscape, woefully inept George W Bush, the American People were far more satisfied with Obama. Let’s face it, it’s not exactly like following Jimi Hendrix at Woodstock.
The Tea Baggers would LOVE to have Petraeus back. They could lampoon the president for lack of resolve while lauding the great David Petraeus and grooming him and his already sizable ego to maybe be the next losing Republican Candidate. Here’s a guy who thinks he’s Douglas fucking MacArthur already and

the ignominious stalker mistress from Hell- Paula Broadwell

has a “Petraeus Cult” in real life and cult leader status in his own mind. Not to mention he also thinks he is Sean Connery despite leaving everyone who saw what has happened more shaken then stirred and disappointing people in a way no spy short of George Lazenby has before. In fact, the only people who love David Petraeus more than David Petraeus are idiot tea baggers hoping to see a white guy get a job he doesn’t deserve or even want like its 1952.

Its almost worth doing to feed their delusion…
It’s hard to believe the Right is so out of touch with America’s massive rejection of their ideas. Apparently they are still a Cargo Cult and have no clue that the 80’s are over, Reagan is not coming back by proxy through Mitt Romney and they aren’t going to bring Cargo from the Sky by doing a rain dance.