But what's REALLY crazy is that this year is the first time I invited my mother to Trevor Live. Many of my closest friends on the board bring their moms every year. My own mom is my best friend, goes with me everywhere, is adored by all my friends and extremely proud of my work with the Trevor Project. So why the hesitation?

Trevor Live is always an extremely emotional night. It's a night filled with stories of teenagers and parents and suicide. And even though the event is centered around LGBTQ youth, the night in many ways has become intertwined with the story of me, my mother and my stepfather.

It is the night, every year, where I step back in time and relive the horror of my stepfather's depression and suicide when I was sixteen. It is the night where I realize just how far I've come since the worst tragedy of my childhood. It is the night that reminds me that often our darkest moments can transform into our greatest gifts.

And so I invited my mother to join me and Mr. Diabolina this year – even though we all knew how hard it would be – because, well, part of helping prevent suicide is acknowledging that it happens. We have to bring it out of the shadows and into the light. So there she sat BEAUTIFUL in her BCBG dress and waterproof mascara, next to "the best man she has ever known" and one of her dearest friends who has been like family to us since my dad died. Adore these three faces.

Invited Little Miss MBA who has been one of the brightest lights in my life since we met as TAs in grad school. Owed her at least one glam night for taking me to countless fabulous fashion events over the last decade as her plus one. Also invited another loverly girlfriend from college who I've recently reconnected with. Last year, she had a friend who committed suicide so I thought the night, though rough, might bring her some healing.

Was THRILLED Mr. NBC was able to fly out from NYC. He is one of my favorite people on the planet AND has been a great friend to the Trevor Project over the years. Was overjoyed that he could finally attend his first Trevor Live after years of hearing Sable Crow and me blab on and on about it.

Rounded out table #36 with Silver Haired Fox and Mr. Architect. Two more faces that I've adored for half my life and whose friendship I would be lost without. Was an honor to have them share such an important night.

So much of meIs made from what I learned from youYou'll be with meLike a handprint on my heartAnd now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mineBy being my friend

The lyrics also pertain to the one man missing from the table...
who I know was there in spirit, who I know is always with me:I've heard it saidThat people come into our lives for a reasonBringing something we must learnAnd we are ledTo those who help us most to growIf we let themAnd we help them in returnWell, I don't know if I believe that's true But I know I'm who I am todayBecause I knew you...

Our Trevor Hero award winner, Katy Perry, was adorable, gracious and humble. She thanked Trevor Project for helping educate her so she can educate others. Love.

But my favorite moment of the night came when I realized the only celeb I wanted to peep, Zachary Quinto, was sitting at the table next to mine. Zachary (Mr. Quinto if you're nasty) is on my favorite show on the planet right now, American Horror Story, as a terrifying serial killer. So when Sable Crow and I went over to introduce ourselves and thank him for attending, I was more than a little afeared.

He quickly put us at ease by making a joke about needing to raise even more money to spruce up the decor at the call centers because - hello! - it's for gays and should look fabulous. He proceeded to ask some incisive questions about fundraising and programming and I quickly realized a) how articulate he is and b) how dedicated he is to the organization.

He doesn't only show up to the events and write checks. He's chosen to understand the work from the inside out, electing to go through the INTENSE 40-hour training to be a volunteer lifeline counselor. He's taken calls from suicidal teens. He is my newest Trevor shero.

As we parted ways, I confessed I was terrified speaking to him for most of our conversation. Those killer eyes twinkled behind the Clark Kent glasses as he told me I should be terrified of the writers who come up with all that cray #AHSFX stuff. He just acts it out. I giggled with horror and ran away.

Life's been a non-stop, overwhelming whirlwind over the past few months with work and travel and family. Didn't really start thinking about my dress until two weeks before the event. Wasn't loving anything I saw in stores or online. Well nothing that was under $500.

Thought about just wearing something that I already owned but nothing felt quite right. Everything was either too formal or too chesticle bearing. Wanted to keep the look cocktail and board member-appropriate. Cut to a crazed shopping trip THE DAY BEFORE THE EVENT.

Panicked and desperate, I walked into a store I NEVER go in: White House Black Market. Saw SO MANY evening options and all extremely well priced between $100 and $200. God help me I've become a cheap old lady who shops at a subsidiary of Chico's. The apocalypse is clearly near.

Settled on a simple, off-the-shoulder fringe LBD. Have always wanted a flapper look (see! super old lady!) Amped up the glam by getting the makeup done by MAC per usual. Advised my friend Lawyer Legs to do the same. Ugh could the results BEEEE any more delish?

We matched from our Mac faces to our McQueen toes.

Sablecrow more than approved – he coveted.

Nabbed all my rosy "jewels" for under $50 in the fashion district. Will get so much use out of that ring and the lariat with fringe was inspired, no??!

We were really rocking the two most popular looks of the night: pinkie sparkle and little black dress chic.

My favorite LBD of the night was this one with built in bracelets! NEED!

Fave male accessory of the night was the Brad bowtie

Matthew Morrison looked hot like fire in his

But didn't hold a candle to Mr. Architect who rocked his with my favorite: polka dots.

He matched Little Miss MBA perfectly!

Best end o' the night accessory: the stuffed horses we all got from event sponsor, Wells Fargo.

Thursday, November 1, 2012

The Costume
This summer, I went to Mexico City for the first time and fell madly in love. The food, the museums, the commerce, the history, mi gente Latina. It all reminded me of NYC...but even more alive. It was a business trip so I only got in one touristy visit: the Castillo de Chapultepec.

I would have given anything to go to Frida Kahlo's little blue house museum. Was fairly devastated that the timing didn't work out. So when Halloween snuck up on me, my costume choice was a no-brainer. I already owned everything I needed to be Frida: the long black skirt (Missoni for Tarjay), the Mexican blouse (Forever 21), the gaudy jewelry, fake flowers and pashmina (all Fashion District), huaraches (authentic Guatemalan) and the critical eyebrow pencil (Anastasia). And yet when I put it all together, it felt too boring. Not enough of a tribute to a Latina legend.

Decided to amp up the costume with a Dia de Los Muertos spin. My mom and I were planning to go to the annual celebration at Hollywood Forever Cemetery for the first time this year.

The festival, one of the largest Day of the Dead celebrations in the US, was one of the reasons we buried my grandmother there in March.

We liked the idea that the cemetery brings so much life to the grounds throughout the year. It's a much more European and Latin way to think about one's final resting place...to celebrate life alongside death...to honor the past by living in the present.

It's something my grandmother who loved herself a good time would have appreciated. In part, the idea for the costume was a tribute to her too ;)

As I suspected, there were several booths doing day of the dead makeup so I got a face full of it! Scare me but me encanta! Total cost of the costume: $20. A+

The missing piece: a certain Mr. Diabolina. He insisted on matching me. I swear HE is the one who is all about the couple's costumes the last few years.

I tried to suggest a variety of costumes: white painters like Van Gough or Warhol so we'd be thematically connected but not matchy matchy. Pretty much anyone except the monstrosity that was Diego.

It's horrifying that he was the love of Frida's life despite all the cheating. Don't care how much of a genius he was. Also his fupa = me vomit.

Which I think made Mr. Diabolina obsessed with being portly and forcing me to kiss him. Here he is one strategically placed pillow later.

After watching me get my makeup done earlier in the day, my mom volunteered to do his.

She killed it.

The final product: Frida and her Diego.

The Party

Mr. Architect and Silver Fox's annual Halloween soiree. This year they dressed as gay Chick-fil-a employees bringing the homophobic fast food chain down from the inside. (Silver Fox not pictured because he passed out waaaaaay too early. F.)

Within minutes of arriving, I'd made some fast friends: alive Frida and Day of the Dead glamazon.

Turns out the Day of the Dead couple are architects who just moved from Mexico City! No coincidences in life. LOVED talking to them all night.

Oddly, all my other favorites of the night shared an undead theme.

Best costume: Sable Crow as Beetlejuice.

Best couple: Death Becomes Her!

Best MANi: Long Island Medium.

Dia de Los Muertos felt like one of the zeitgeist costumes this year.
Christian Siriano and pal rocked the look.