Scotland captain Darren Fletcher: Hospital drugs made England tie a blur but now my sights are set on playing in major finals

FLETCHER lifts the lid on his heartbreaking battle with ulcerative colitis and his despair at missing his country's international tie with England at Wembley as he could barely open his eyes and watch the game on TV.

The pain of being diagnosed with his illness, the pain of dealing with the trauma, the pain of not being able to play football with his kids, never mind as a professional.

The pain of being hospitalised on drips having lost litres of blood during his suffering.

If Fletcher’s story doesn’t inspire you, your heart is as hard as Scotland have found it to qualify for a major tournament.

Yet that’s what is now driving Fletcher as he looks forward positively at each new day.

The thought of joining his country on a major stage. The thought of ending the absence which now stretches over two decades.

Assessing what Fletcher has had it seems ludicrous to use the word pain when describing how he feels at not being with Scotland at a major competition.

However, talking to him you feel that’s exactly what it is. And having conquered his illness, Fletcher is now hellbent on overcoming Scotland’s pain as well.

Fletcher said: “To go with a Scotland squad which goes back into a major tournament is now my goal for the rest of my international career, without a shadow of a doubt.

“Turning 30 means I’m now a veteran in the media. Ryan Giggs said to me you go from being a young lad to a veteran overnight!

“I was scared folk would say that my legs were gone now I have turned 30.

“After having one bad game they say you can’t run any more!

“But I feel great. Even on a day when I should feel average, I feel on top of the world given what I have been through.

“Turning 30 I’m now definitely looking to add the time I missed onto the end of my career.

“The way I look at it, my joints, my ligaments, those things have had a rest The biggest thing for me now with Scotland is playing in a tournament – that is my biggest aim now.”

2013 Getty Images

Fletcher was gutted that he couldn't join his teammates for the England game

Listening to Fletcher you get the impression anything is possible.

First thing is first though – and that’s getting the dark blue shirt back on.

While Gordon Strachan has been building momentum for the nation, Fletcher was building himself back up to be part of the scene.

He’s missed it all right, no more so than when the troops headed into battle against England at Wembley last year.

As Strachan and his men led the Tartan Army south, Fletcher was stuck in a hospital bed rigged up to drips, barely able to even open his eyes and watch the game on TV.

He said: “I was in hospital the night of the England game. It was the day after one of my surgeries. I remember trying to watch the game, it was very difficult.

“It was a bit of a blur because I was heavily sedated and trying to keep my eyes open.

“That proved very difficult though I did open my eyes when Kenny Miller scored. Scotland against England was a game I had never experienced and it was at Wembley.

“All of those things are stuff you hear stories of, stories your dad told you about going to those games. You see the images of it and everything to do with it is a massive game in British football history.

“I wanted to be back for that England game but it was false hope.

“I’d never played in one of those games and, although the surgery went well, it was still a bit ahead of my schedule.

“That was only from a cautious side, not from any complications or anything.

“I just wanted to make sure we gave it a few weeks here and there which, ultimately, added on to the time. I wanted to have targets like that in my head because it gave me inspiration. Even if it was a false hope I kept believing. When it passed I set a new target.”

During this period Strachan did everything to keep Fletcher involved.

Invites came for squad get-togethers, but the Old Trafford star said: “I went to one squad gathering but it was difficult just because I was battling to try to get back from illness.

“I sat with the lads but sometimes you don’t want to be a hindrance. However, it was mainly for the reason that I wasn’t physically able to go.”

After missing so many Scotland matches Fletcher is now looking to make up for lost time – starting with the Euro 2016 qualifying campaign.

He said: “I don’t know if 100 caps will be possible, you never know.

“It’s something I always wanted to achieve – I don’t know if that is going to be possible now – but I just want to go to a major tournament.”