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The big “S” (“but what about socialization?”)

“I was telling a friend about the book I’m writing about unschooling. She knew I home-schooled my children but we met in a business seminar, and clearly the idea was new to her. I mentioned that my daughter was somewhat of “a social animal”, especially in comparison to me, and the challenges it presented to me. “Oh, yes” she said “did you write anything about socialization?” With a sense of shock I realized that I totally forgot to include in my outline any mention of socialization. The above question is by far the most asked question of all homeschoolers, whether they are an only child or whether they come from a family of seven. Whether you are talking to another person at the post-office or whether they meet you and your child at a community theater you are all participating in.

But being a homeschooling mom for so many years now, and not meeting so many new to the subject anymore, also, having resolved the issue in my mind so long ago – I totally forgot to include it in my book (thank you K., for reminding me!).

It often amazes me that people hold in such high-regard school socialization, especially when bullying is finally coming out to the forefront, and everyone is becoming aware of how prevalent it is, and how much it is part of school socialization.

Yes, we humans are social animals, but if you delve into what that really means then suddenly romanticizing it may lose it grip. Our social nature has both necessary and problematic components to it. Yes, cooperation and working together can get us far, and we have it in us to help and support each other, on the other hand humans have inflicted horror and violence on each other for a long, long time now.

The question that needs to be asked by everyone, over and over, is how do we promote and bring about the positive aspects of socialization and how do we lower the negative aspects of it, for both children and adults. It is definitely time to pull our heads out of the sand and face the truth head on, with no romantic lies to blind us…“