Misadventures in Mommyhood…tales from a manic mommy

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Desperate for Date Night

Yes, people – hubby and I were in dire need of a date night. And I was desperate to wear something other than sweats, drink wine out of an actual glass instead of sippy cups and not have a baby attached to my hip.

My permanent accessory...Baby J

Well, two out of three ain’t bad.

It was a Tuesday night. And apparently every sitter in Tulsa County was babysitting someone else or else ignoring my calls. Because I called every single one of them.

I was not to be deterred. I wanted OUT OF THE HOUSE.

So what does a desperate housewife do? What every good mom would do – schlep her kid to the bar.

Baby J is NOT happy about this.. Date Night with A Baby -

Actually, we had to go to a Chamber of Commerce event first….(my hubby is kinda a big deal. I think I used to be before I become barefoot and pregnant living on the farm…) I am pretty sure Baby J was the first baby ever to attend a Chamber cocktail party

. But alas, nothing can ever go easy in my life. First I had to pick up the dogs from the vet. I’m all dressed up in my Sunday best – as I,m trying to haul my 100 pound Doberman into the car. He wanted no part of it. And my Frenchy decided she wanted to run off. And I have a baby in the car. Who is crying. It was quite a sight.

Thank goodness for the people in the parking lot who took pity upon me (I must have looked very desperate) and helped hoist Otto into the car and wrangled Izzy from the ten other dogs she was trying to play with.

Finally, on my way to the Chamber event.

Well, not so much. Otto decided to crawl over Baby J to get out of the car. Think blood curdling screams, blood all over Josie and mom absolutely freaking out. She has blood and claw marks all over her. I am beside myself.

So clean the baby up, throw dogs in the house – then drive my frazzled self and injured baby to the Chamber event. I warn Shane of my mood before I get there. Shane thinks maybe it isn’t a good idea for us to come.

But DAMMIT. I just want a glass of wine and to be around grownups for two seconds…IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK???

Okay – So Shane keeps his mouth shut.

So my goal was for everyone else to hold Baby J while I flitted around socializing pretending I was back in the working world and more importantly, drinking wine from the bar.But Baby J wasn’t the least bit interested in socializing with anyone else but mama.

Of course not. I am destined to have her perched on my hip at all times.

And so goes the rest of the night. Think meltdowns (from mommy, not baby), a frazzled husband and a cranky baby. Probably the most unromantic, undate- like night in the history of date nights.

Date Night with a Baby. Oxymoron of all proportions

But, I did get my wine. Lots of it. And a big ol headache the next morning. Baby J decided to wake up extra early too.

Her way of telling me “I told you so…”

Karma’s a bitch.

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About marniefernandez

Official kid wrangler of four. Step mom, adoptive mom & bio mom. City girl turned country bumpkin. Small town girl next door married to Hollywood sniper/moto-cross/ninja architect. Career girl turned stay-at-home mom with baby on hip. Permanent taxi-cab driver, schedule organizer and professional laundress. (When not chasing kids...) Mommy blogger, columnist, travel writer and consultant. And no, I don't sleep. And yes, I take Prozac. And drink wine from sippy cups.

9 thoughts on “Desperate for Date Night”

You were SO desperate to imagine, in your wildest dreams, that was going to work out! I am surprised the cocktail party guests didn’t start to wonder about the claw marks on Baby J, thinking you done the clawing yourself!

I know, I look back at that night and wonder what all the big wigs at the Chamber were thinking…wild eyed mom hanging out at the bar with a baby w/ claw marks all over her. Surprised no one called DHS.