Thursday, June 08, 2006

Ass backwards identity theft - VA Style...

Jumping right in, because this shit is crazy as hell...

Ass backwards identity theft VA Style...A certain Rich requested more details on the theft of the personal identification information of United States veterans and active duty service men and women. According to the Dept. of Veterans Affairs, someone downloaded the personal information of some 26 million veterans and active duty service men and women and took it home to work on something that probably doesn't seem so fucking urgent right now.

The laptop computer onto which all this juicy information was downloaded was stolen from this poor motherfucker's home. So, the personal information…the very valuable personal information…the so valuable that it makes one shudder to think of the possible uses of it information of veterans and active duty soldiers is now out there somewhere in the hands of someone unknown.

This theft was so assbackwards that the thief may not even know what he or she has!

Not everyone watches the news.

Anyhoo...

The Dept. of Veterans Affairs sadly failed to apply the proven Tylenol technique of crisis management and chose instead to sit on the information…for some time…and then trickle it out in a manner so overflowing with reluctance that one was forced to question the validity of what was being said.26.5 million Veterans...1.1 million active-duty personnel from all the armed forces...430,000 members of the National Guard...645,000 members of the Reserves.

What’s out there?

Names, birthdates and social security numbers.

Those made vulnerable by this fucked up ass backwards crime are being asked to monitor their accounts and credit. The problem is, the thief can sit on this shit for years…sell it for tons of cash to someone else who can sit on this shit for years.

Even if they retrieve the laptop, what are the odd that the thief was too much of a dumbass to download that shit?

Oh what the hell, who thought someone would waltz home with that kind of data on their laptop in the first place?

I tell all of you true, the stench of this convenient "Robbery" is just being used to cover up the fact that the individual freaked when he thought he would be caught otherwise for selling the information.

Again, why would anyone be allowed to remove such information from the office anyway?