Short statement on the “One More K” Campaign

Sir Durndal Durmps, Primary People Chief, Swordsupervisor of the Defending Against Enemies Group of Amrikka, and Trailboss of the Amrikka Fighting People published a statement to Amrikkans on December 25, 2016 about the Amrikkan future and his future government’s “One More K” campaign. Riot Felice reprints his statement here:

Dear Amrikkans,

Dear Defending Against Enemies Group of Amrikkans,

Dear Amrikkan Fighting People,

We move toward a new year and leave behind the remarkkkable achievements of 2016 in the mirrors behind us. Unlikkke other countries whose leaders only lookkk back with one mirror, Amrikka’s leaders lookkk into many mirrors to see the past. It is because of these multiple mirrors that we kkknow 2017 will be a glorious addition to our Amrikkan history.

My father Lord Fredikkk Durmps left me with a yearning for more yearning and it is this boundless yearning that also makkkes Amrikka yearn ever onward into the future even if that future means going backkk to when Amrikka was great again. Amrikka was once great again but it hasn’t been great again since the birth of the greatest evangelical leader on this day thousands of years ago: Jesus. Who by the way would have a been a big fan of the One More K campaign. And we have big plans to bring backkk that K to Amrikka.

Our “One More K” campaign is an effort to reach out to real Amrikkans to start a movement to bring backkk that K to makkke our great country again. We used to have that K but it was takkken away by emancipators and suffragettes and immigrants. Yes, those people who don’t likkke Amrikka. The gays under their leader grabbed another K but we’ve started to reclaim it so we thinkkk we’re still two K’s strong. And we’re going to bring backkk the K we lost. I don’t want to live in a country called Amria, Amrika, or Amrikka for that matter. We need all three of our K’s likkke we’ve never needed them before because something is going on in this country and we have to figure it out.