...i once was caught at target jacking a bunch of dvd's(I was deep in a drug twist and needed cash...bad times.). the security ended up meeting me in the parking lot and i made a run for it. one of them tackled me sending me to the ground headfirst splitting my chin wide open. so they dragged me back through target to the loss prevention office with blood pouring from my chin onto the freshly waxed floor with all these customers looking at me while i was screaming "look what these faggots just did to me!someone call the fucking cops"...well they did, and they came, and since i was a minor at the time they released me back to my mom instead of hauling my dumbass to jail. a couple of weeks later i got the summons from the state with the projected fine which i expected but then i got a letter from targets headquarters stating that i had to pay them a fine of 600.00. i wrote them back stating that they should fuck themselves and that i wasnt paying shit and that i would threaten to sue them on behalf of the 'overzealous methods' used by their security detail at the store... pretty much trying to start a pissing match, this worked pretty well with the letters i wrote to the UN and PBS but i wasnt expecting much leniancy from target. well expecting a letter with some sort of "no, were gonna sue you!" statement, i was surprised to find an apology and theyre choice to drop all fines against me...im glad that experience happened because it sparked off a chain of events that would lead me to get off the hard drugs i was on...but shoplifting is fucking stupid and i will never do it again...

shoegazer76

06-07-2007, 07:59 AM

That is so fucking funny! Who the fuck do they think they are trying to fine you $600? Where did they come up with that figure? How the fuck were they going to enforce this fee by sending out there football team on you? I hate Target completely. I've never shoplifted in my life but if I ever have to it will be from them.
I dated a clepto once. She couldn't walk into any establishment without jackin something. It got quite annoying being that she was under 18 at the time & I wasn't. Guilty by association, I'd been behind bars for something she stole if she'd been caught.

algunz

06-07-2007, 08:53 AM

Did ya here about the Home Depot employees who were fired for calling the cops on some guys trying to steal 2 chainsaws?

marooko

06-07-2007, 09:05 AM

i am guilty of shoplifting also. but now that i am older i am against it. we should all hang our heads in shame. nah forget it, just dont do it anymore. i used to go into gas station stores as a kid and buy a soda and stuff things insidde of it. it was pretty funny.

lowfront

06-07-2007, 09:37 AM

I shoplifted quite a bit at one point in my life.

At one point I got an addiction to it when I was working at a certain wholesale company.

That ended pretty bad. They called me up to there lost prevention office one day. Had a bunch of tapes and folders on the table in front of me.

"We know what you have been up to Lowfront. We have been doing a investigation on you the last 2 months"

I stumbled pretty bad

They told me that they had witness that saw me take some stupid $50 item. So I just admitted to that thinking it would be a sorry here's the $50 bucks I owe you.

But it wasn't that. They knew I took a lot more and one item in particular that was very valuable. They tried very hard to get me to admit to it. And to be honest I really can't believe I didn't because they were good at there jobs.

If anyone has ever been in this sort of situation knows that they can practically get you to admit to something you didn't even do they're so nuts.

Anyways they called the cops and they came, asked me if they wanted to press chargers

Yes

And I got escorted out passing by the guard at the door I managed to fool big time with my hole steal fest.

Went to court thinking they had me screwed with all these video tapes thought I was going to get grand larceny.

Worst 3 months of my life waiting for that court date.

Ended up needing to just pay the $50 for the thing I admitted too.

Lesson of the day.....Don't steal

I haven't since and it actually took me a while to get over the addiction

guest-5666

06-07-2007, 09:42 AM

yknow, i just remembered i stole a guitar peice by peice from guitar center once...

ficklecycle

06-07-2007, 10:07 AM

Holy crap!

Man I just use to steal little Lego toys from Rite Aid when I was a kid.

algunz

06-07-2007, 10:20 AM

My worst crime has probably been stealing hundreds of dollars worth of bras and underwear when I worked at Mervyns in high school.

My most daring was probably stealing cartons of cigarettes from the duty free stores on the ferries traveling around Europe. That would have sucked to get caught and be by myself thousands of miles away from home.

I'm getting better, but I still stumble occasionally and give in when the opportunity presents itself. I carry some guilt, but not a lot - Does that make me a bad person?

jigglypuflvr@mac.com

06-07-2007, 10:32 AM

I can't even buy one of what I make in an hour?

jigglypuflvr@mac.com

06-07-2007, 10:32 AM

The people giveth, and the people taketh away.

higgybaby23

06-07-2007, 12:09 PM

shoplifting>armed robbery

marooko

06-07-2007, 12:19 PM

i stole 1st base.

BigBoy!

06-07-2007, 12:31 PM

shoplifting>armed robbery>sodomy

thelastgreatman

06-07-2007, 12:50 PM

I used to do a lot of it, probably the most interesting occasion actually taking place at a Barnes and Nobles. At the time my friends and I had taken to heading there whenever we were bored and just sitting around and reading for hours. One day I went to the bathroom in the back of the store, past the manager's office, and noticed that just beyond the bathrooms was an emergency exit door.

This strip mall was a big U shape with no breaks in it and the Barnes was all the way at the furthest tip of the U. Lightbulb went off, I got my buddy Sprak and we drove around the back of the place. Sure enough, there was the clearly marked Barnes and Nobles emergency exit door. So we went back inside and picked out every book we could possibly want at the time--30, 40, I dunno how many but enough that when I held them with my arms fully extended they came up to my chin. Sprak would wait out back, car running, back door open, and I'd just stroll through the exit and dive in the back and we'd take off.

Well, there was something I didn't know about the emergency exit bars on those doors--you have to push quite hard against them for them to actually pop the door open. So I hefted this huge stack of books, strolled right past the manager's office and bathrooms and used my back to just press up against the emergency bar, assuming that it would give way.

It did not, but the alarm did go off, loud as a motherfucker. Panic set in, I dropped all the books and just started walking for the front door. Things still wouldn't have been that bad had a dude in a shirt and tie come out of the manager's office (manager, I assume) and told me to "Stop right there!" I was only 16 or so and still very much not interested in ever being arrested, so I just looked at him briefly while continuing to walk and shook my head "no." Then as I'm starting to actually get out into the bookshelf area he came up from behind me and grabbed me by my left arm from behind, trying to spin me around.

I decided to go with the spin and with the help of a shitload of adrenaline slammed my right hand into his nose on my way around. It must have been broken 'cause in my mind's eye I can see the blood squirting out to both sides from the instant my hand made contact. He sat the fuck down right quick, and I resumed my brisk but hopefully still incognito beeline for the front door.

Got outside without further incident thanks to the limitless truth that is "you can get away with it if you just act like you're supposed to be doing it." But once outside I faced a new problem--Sprak was waiting in a now clearly indentifiable getaway car on the opposite side of this store, but in order for me to get to him I had to run ALL the way around the U. I was scrambling through the parking lot, zigzagging inbetween rows of parked cars as I kept seeing the security cars headed in the direction I'd just come from. It was really quite a significantly long distance to have to run in such a state, especially given how much I hate and am bad at moving quickly for any length of time.

Finally I came around to the back side of the U and did the best I could to full-throttle sprint the few hundred yards I had to go to Sprak. At some point I got it into my head that it would be smarter to run up on the grass hill behind this access road since there was a thick forest of trees right there, and that way if security should come up behind me real quick I could make for the wilderness. I was still up there when I eventually made it to that furthest point of the U and could see Sprak, oblivious as always, moving shit around in the backseat of his ride with both driver's side doors open.

I was brutally out of breath and my sprint had been reduced to a desperate Marathon Man-style plodding. I tried my best to scream at him, waving my arms in the air, but as always he was completely ignorant of the world around him. Just as I was nearing a couple of dumpsters surrounded by a concrete wall only fifty yards away from the car and safety, I saw the red and blue lights striking the tree line on the far side of the U.

Quickly surveying the situation, Sprak was fucked and I needed to hide, and thanks to the height of the hill I was running along I managed to leap a remarkable distance, plant one foot on the top of that concrete wall and dive headfirst into an open garbage dumpster.

I spent about a half hour lying in the dumpster as quietly as possible, listening to Sprak make up idiotic excuses to the police interrogating him RIGHT next to the concrete wall. "Oh, I was just, like... racing my car back here, Officer." But I guess they had no option but to let him go despite being a dumb fuck, and I climbed out of the rank dumpster no longer so afraid but without any ride and smelling like garbage.

This is all true.

algunz

06-07-2007, 01:32 PM

I'm assuming this was pre-cellphone days. I worked at a Barnes & Noble for 3 years, was one of the managers. I would have held the door open for you.

Deviate_420

06-07-2007, 01:46 PM

Everything I own I have stolen......

marooko

06-07-2007, 02:02 PM

anyone ever unknowingly commit a hate crime?

Deviate_420

06-07-2007, 03:16 PM

anyone ever unknowingly commit a hate crime?

I bought A Rush Limbaugh book once....

marooko

06-07-2007, 03:53 PM

I bought A Rush Limbaugh book once....

thats pretty good but not really what i had in mind. HAHAHA.

thelastgreatman

06-07-2007, 03:54 PM

UNknowingly?

... no.

amyzzz

06-07-2007, 04:18 PM

Whoa. This is a crazy long pointless thread for the Questions forum. I stole a couple books and stickers when I was 10.

thelastgreatman

06-07-2007, 06:02 PM

Well it's a 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59 autmobile...

marooko

06-07-2007, 07:18 PM

hate crimes werent always hate crimes.

JClemy

06-07-2007, 09:50 PM

I've been caught stealing;
once when I was 5...
I enjoy stealing.
It's just as simple as that.
Well, it's just a simple fact.
When I want something,
I don't want to pay for it.

JClemy

06-07-2007, 09:50 PM

I have stolen things in my house I'm sure though. Posters and stuff.

smokealotapotamus

06-09-2007, 09:05 AM

When I was in the 6th grade, I would steal kids pokemon cards, and then sell them to other kids on the playground. No joke, this was how I bought my PS1.

DeltaSigChi4

06-09-2007, 12:02 PM

Stealing is bad, mmkay.

E

phoenixsky

06-09-2007, 12:59 PM

I accidentally stole pogs once when I was 10 and felt so bad I went back to the store and told them what happened. The store manager ended up giving them to me.

I could write those after school specials, beeyotches.

noisemachine

06-09-2007, 01:18 PM

I've never shoplifted before and probably never will, as I have the biggest guilty conscience ever. These stories are pretty entertaining though.

joppy-slow

06-09-2007, 01:33 PM

No to stealing.
Everything I've ever stolen, it came back to me 3 X fold.. Had a jeep cherokee stolen from me, probably for me stealin that kids wallet back in 8th grade.
this one time I was house-sitting for some people who were really wealthy and they had this huge mansion with 4 floors of random shit every where. they also had tons of food and had 2 huge freezers stocked with meat, frozen foods etc.. stacked to the brim.
so one day I am rifling through their freezer in their kitchen looking at all this frozen food and I get to almost the bottom and their is an envelope that says 1989, (It was 2003 at the time). Inside the envelope, I pull out 6 crisp $100 dollar bills. I was broke and strung out at the time, so I didn't even think twice, since in my sick mind I thought these people would never miss this money. They never found out and I kept housesitting for them, but I still think about how shady of me it was to steal this money. That was the last time I stole anything.

marooko

06-10-2007, 08:39 AM

No to stealing.
Everything I've ever stolen, it came back to me 3 X fold.. Had a jeep cherokee stolen from me, probably for me stealin that kids wallet back in 8th grade.
this one time I was house-sitting for some people who were really wealthy and they had this huge mansion with 4 floors of random shit every where. they also had tons of food and had 2 huge freezers stocked with meat, frozen foods etc.. stacked to the brim.
so one day I am rifling through their freezer in their kitchen looking at all this frozen food and I get to almost the bottom and their is an envelope that says 1989, (It was 2003 at the time). Inside the envelope, I pull out 6 crisp $100 dollar bills. I was broke and strung out at the time, so I didn't even think twice, since in my sick mind I thought these people would never miss this money. They never found out and I kept housesitting for them, but I still think about how shady of me it was to steal this money. That was the last time I stole anything.

i stole money. ONCE!!! from my mom...lol. it was 10 bucks, i was like 5. when she found out she put my hand on the bed and whipped it with a belt. ive never EVER!!, stolen money from anyone again. and ive had many chances.

Bosco

06-10-2007, 01:49 PM

I accidentally stole pogs once when I was 10 and felt so bad I went back to the store and told them what happened. The store manager ended up giving them to me.

Haha, I did the same! Only thing was I didnt go back and return them, I instead went to the closest open sewer gate next to the walgreens I stole them from, and dropped them down the sewer. Stupid, I know, but it cleared my guilty conscience.

Bosco

06-10-2007, 01:53 PM

thelastgreatman and nipples,

thanks for those stories. very entertaining.

ah the stupid things we do when were young ;)

algunz

07-27-2008, 09:07 PM

Maybe this should be in the confessions thread, but I shoplifted a Bratz toy make-up kit today.

Cdubby

07-27-2008, 09:24 PM

i cant recall ever stealing from someone or a store ever, but i have been given change or cash that was way over what i was supposed to get....

one time at a movie theater gave a girl a 20 for two 8 dollar tickets, ended up giving me 4 twenties back instead of 1's.......

bank teller gave me 4 one hundred dollar bills instead of the three hundred i asked to take out

never told them their mistakes, felt kind of guilty about it but fuck it

algunz

07-27-2008, 09:34 PM

For some reason, during those kinds of encounters I always fess up.

Fess . . . is that really a word?

algunz

07-27-2008, 09:49 PM

I don't speak Geek.

'splain please

algunz

07-27-2008, 09:56 PM

Gotcha. I hear that a lot on here, but I must admit this board is kind of my Google.

Boourns

07-27-2008, 09:58 PM

Sadly, no real shoplifting stories. I never fancied going to jail and such.

Well, a couple years ago I saw that stupid second Pirates movie and afterwards my friend and I sneaked into The Devil Wears Prada.

Later that year I grabbed an issue of Under the Radar that was on one of the VIP tables at the Viper Room.

When the motherfuckin Arcade Fire played the Troubadour, I swiped a couple bottles of water after the show: one half full and one unopened. I was thirsty.

Does faking my way into pits count?

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:00 PM

I guess it would be better said that I use this source when I am not in need of immediate gratification.

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:03 PM

I'm a girl.

gaypalmsprings

07-27-2008, 10:05 PM

put your clothes on

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:08 PM

put your clothes on

I can't. I have no arms and no legs.

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:13 PM

GayPalm wouldn't be asking you to put your clothes on silly.

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:28 PM

I already have one child. I think I'm good. How 'bout you just pay me back in pharmaceuticals?

algunz

07-27-2008, 10:43 PM

Night, Night.

emtgreg

07-28-2008, 12:29 AM

lulz....NOOOB, sorry I am so sorry about that it just came out of nowhere(the lulz.....NOOOB comment.) I am a Applied Math major so imma total nerd and i do the l337 speak (nerd talk) every now and then your just going to have to forgive me...

on Wow I randomly spam /2 City-Trade with "LFE who can do +2 to 1335, MY MATS +Tip!!"

usually to citywide lulz

greghead

07-28-2008, 01:31 AM

I jack shit all the time. I shoplift nearly everytime a good opportunity presents itself. My favorite are airport bookstores, you can literally walk out of those places with anything. There are usually only two employees and they are usually helping a long line of customers. Where I have never stolen from: Best Buy and Wal-Mart, all those cameras--whether they are actually turned on or not--make me edgy

algunz

07-28-2008, 06:52 AM

The cameras are all on, but there's rarely somebody actually tracking you. You get caught by those when you are stuffing shit in your bag for a while. Ask Winona Ryder.

sonofhal

07-28-2008, 07:17 AM

Do you teach your class to shoplift too? Nice work. Look what mummy stole for us.

You are deluding yourself if you think stealing from a big company means nobody is getting hurt. Most stores are given a wage budget based on profitability. The more you steal, the more the workers at the shop get their hours cut/lose their jobs. You may only be taking the odd thing, but so are all the other shoplifters.

algunz

07-28-2008, 07:28 AM

I know I'm delusional. I just can't seem to pass up the opportunity. I'm not proud of myself.

. . . and no I don't include a lesson on shoplifting. Besides many of them have already acquired the skill.

BROKENDOLL

07-28-2008, 07:29 AM

yknow, i just remembered i stole a guitar peice by peice from guitar center once... Now that I've got my second guitar apart, you wouldn't by chance have those still lying around, would you?

BROKENDOLL

07-28-2008, 07:53 AM

I guess it would be better said that I use this source when I am not in need of immediate gratification. I can't tell you how much gratification I get coming here...

Yeah, leave that to the porn fetish websites or the hookers in real life.
Unless your a chick in which case you probably own a dildo. Rigging my dildo to work as a mouse guarantees the gratification I get with each and every post.

I can't. I have no arms and no legs. You're taking this dildo shit way too serious, Algunz.

You, have done what no other has done, corrected me and enlightened me. Pacifistically...

I owe you my first born.

I already have one child. I think I'm good. How 'bout you just pay me back in pharmaceuticals? Is there a difference?

captncrzy

07-28-2008, 07:57 AM

When my daughter was three, she stole a piece of candy from the Circle K counter...I made her return it and apologize to the meth-using store clerk. He was like, "oh, ok. you know it's not nice to steal, right? ok". She never did it again though.

algunz

07-28-2008, 07:57 AM

Once again, I don't understand you. "Mumbler" : )

This is for BD, not the captn.

BROKENDOLL

07-28-2008, 08:10 AM

I can't tell you how much gratification I get coming here...

Rigging my dildo to work as a mouse guarantees the gratification I get with each and every post.

You're taking this dildo shit way too serious, Algunz.

Is there a difference?

Once again, I don't understand you. "Mumbler" : )

This is for BD, not the captn. Made about as much sense as claiming to have no arms or legs when someone told you to keep your clothes on. No offense, Algunz, but without arms and legs, you probably look like a dildo.

Courtney

07-28-2008, 08:15 AM

Wow there are a lot of thieves on this board.

When I was around 8 years old, I stole a pack of Fruit Stripe gum from a CVS. I felt guilty about it for what seemed like months.

algunz

07-28-2008, 08:21 AM

Made about as much sense as claiming to have no arms or legs when someone told you to keep your clothes on. No offense, Algunz, but without arms and legs, you probably look like a dildo.

GayPalm's comment was an allusion to another thread as was mine.

If you knew, you'd know.

locachica73

07-28-2008, 08:28 AM

My daughter recently got caught shoplifting a silver ring at Walmart. I had to go and pick her up so on the way out I told her to pick out an outfit. She didn't understand so I informed her that since she liked the walmart so much that from now on all she could own was shit from Walmart. I was going to take all her $70 Jeans and $40 shirts from the skater shops and donate them to people who would appreciate them and she could wear some fucking faded glory high wasted jeans and a floral shirt for all I cared. She hasn't shoplifted since.

algunz

07-28-2008, 08:31 AM

There's actually some cute stuff at Walmart.

locachica73

07-28-2008, 08:33 AM

Not to a 15 year old girl who only wants low rise skinny jeans that have some specific name brand on the pocket. You would have thought the suggestion was the same as telling her I was going to lock her in the basement for a month.

Although I can honestly say I have never found anything that I would wear at walmart either other then bras. Everything else is cheaply made and fits weird.

algunz

07-28-2008, 08:34 AM

There's nothing better than creative discipline.

Courtney

07-28-2008, 08:36 AM

My daughter recently got caught shoplifting a silver ring at Walmart. I had to go and pick her up so on the way out I told her to pick out an outfit. She didn't understand so I informed her that since she liked the walmart so much that from now on all she could own was shit from Walmart. I was going to take all her $70 Jeans and $40 shirts from the skater shops and donate them to people who would appreciate them and she could wear some fucking faded glory high wasted jeans and a floral shirt for all I cared. She hasn't shoplifted since.

... so the lesson was to only shoplift from expensive stores?

locachica73

07-28-2008, 08:36 AM

LOL yeah I always try to come up with something that will reach her, that was the only thing that really did.

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 08:38 AM

One time I was walking into WalMart and I was confronted by some chick in the parking lot. She asked if I would return a hair blow dryer for her without the receipt. I said sure if you suck my dick. I have to assume she had stolen the hair blow dryer.

algunz

07-28-2008, 08:39 AM

You said "hair blow."

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 08:39 AM

and she blew

locachica73

07-28-2008, 08:40 AM

... so the lesson was to only shoplift from expensive stores?

LOL no when we went home and I packed up all her shit and put it in a laundry basket and threw it in the back of my truck (makeup, hair straightener, clothes and everything else) telling her if she ever stole anything again it would all go to the goodwill she realized I was serious. We are not rich by any means but the kids have never lacked for anything and I told them that to me stealing was a slap in my face because they have always had what they need and there are plenty of people in the world who have nothing and I would be more then willing to give what my kids have to those who have nothing if she continued down that path. So shoplifting has no longer been an issue. There are plenty of other issues though.

BROKENDOLL

07-28-2008, 08:42 AM

One time I was walking into WalMart and I was confronted by some chick in the parking lot. She asked if I would return a hair blow dryer for her without the receipt. I said sure if you suck my dick. I have to assume she had stolen the hair blow dryer. So how much did the blowjob cost you?

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 08:51 AM

So how much did the blowjob cost you?

I don't know...How much does a pack of ribbed condoms cost?

BROKENDOLL

07-28-2008, 09:12 AM

I don't know...How much does a pack of ribbed condoms cost? Not sure, but I bet her dental bill was outrageous! BTW...It's bad enough trying to find parking at a Walmart. How does one find the blowjob section?

JustSteve

07-28-2008, 09:14 AM

when i was a kid i stole a squirting nickel from the magic shop at disneyland. that was the first thing i ever stole. took me about 15 minutes to get the deed done. was so nervous the whole time and just kept my back to everyone as my fingers ripped open the plastic packaging as i pretended to look up at the other stuff hanging on the wall. kinda made it look like my hands were just resting on the ledge as i got up on my tippie toes to see higher. walked out and was sure i was gonna be busted, but made a clean getaway.

years later(late teens) i had friends that would spend the night in the park, sneak around, etc. one night we were there and they decided to steal masks off of the pirates of the caribbean. we had set up a rendezvous time and place for later in the night. a couple of us were sitting at the mcdonalds across the street waiting. about an hour after the agrred upon time they came strolling in and busted open the backpacks that contained 3-4 masks. these guys didn;t drink or do drugs so this was how they got high, off of adrenaline.

i remember in 8th grade we had a school sanctioned ditch day and they took us to sea world. well, a bunch of kids stole souvenirs from the shops and of course, being kids, they couldn't keep their stupid mouths shut. word got back to the admins and they ended up driving all the kids who stole stuff back down to sea world from huntington beach to return the merch.

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 09:25 AM

Not sure, but I bet her dental bill was outrageous! BTW...It's bad enough trying to find parking at a Walmart. How does one find the blowjob section?

hahahahhaha...yeah she wanted to fuck too! I was drunk and she was asking for it. That night i just got lucky, i guess.

algunz

07-28-2008, 09:27 AM

It's amazing how many kids get themselves in trouble, because they can't keep their mouths shut. It's too funny.

chairmenmeow47

07-28-2008, 09:46 AM

i hate shoplifting. it really disgusts me.

i understand the whole jean val jean thing; that someone may have some sort of need to steal, but in general i hate it. in high school, i remember going into stores with people and then they'd all start running when we'd get out and i'd realize that someone stole something and i'd have to run too. ugh, i just never got it. what's the point? if it's not something you need, it's just disgusting. plain and simple. there's no excuse for that bullshit other than the insanity of youth. after you get outta school and such, grow the fuck up, get a job and buy whatever it is you want.

i stole glitter once in high school though. mainly because it was $3 and i just wanted to see if i could do it. i felt bad about it though. i don't even download music anymore. my dad and i are dorks. one time we pulled up to a drive-thru atm and there was $20 sitting in the dispenser. we tried to honk and flag the person ahead of us down, but no luck. we then waited to see if they came back, no luck. then we went inside and waited to speak with someone to return the $20. we figured they could use our ATM receipt to find the person who was before us. so not only do i hate stealing, i've actually waited to return money i've found. i guess some people might think that's stupid, but i know that if i accidentally left $20 in the ATM, i'd want someone to be nice enough to leave it for me.

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 09:49 AM

typing on the internet during work is stealing from your employeer.

chairmenmeow47

07-28-2008, 09:51 AM

typing on the internet during work is stealing from your employeer.

not when it's allowed in the employee handbook :)

Hopeless Semantic

07-28-2008, 09:52 AM

Now that I could afford things I once couldn't, I see shoplifting as an inexcusable act. While it isn't up there with murder or keying one's car, it is still bad because it affects the price of goods which in turns, makes life for the consumer a tad bit more expensive.

Now, I won't lie and say that I didn't partake in the five finger discount ideology as a kid. In fact, I think one of the biggest boasts I had before I hit 18 was the fact that I never got caught. I lifted some big ticketed items, too. The thing for me was more than likely the thrill of thievery. There was one time when I lifted a whole slew of groceries and gave it to a pair of homeless citizens. There used to be justifiable reasoning in my actions, (I don't know what) but now it is merely disdain for petty theft.

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 09:56 AM

it's not stealing unless you get caught

locachica73

07-28-2008, 09:57 AM

I have never shoplifted, I always believed that if I didn't have the money to pay for something then I didn't really deserve it. Plus my sister got caught shoplifting twice and I was always just too scared to try it.

chairmenmeow47

07-28-2008, 10:00 AM

yeah, my former best friend got caught shoplifting at target on my 13th birthday. she couldn't come to my party as a result. and the worst part was, she was just stealing makeup for herself; she didn't even try to steal me a birthday present. she bought a bulletin board that was by the register that said "welcome friends" with ducks and old lady shit on it.

Hopeless Semantic

07-28-2008, 10:04 AM

Hey its the thought that counts, no? At least she was trying to look decent for your party.

jigsaw

07-28-2008, 10:07 AM

I don't know what's wrong with me?

When I used to work at _________, in high school, we would hide all kinds of stuff in the trash and then throw the trash in the dumpster. After work we would just go pick up the stuff out of the dumpster.

When I used to work in the restaurant industry we would steel all kinds of meals. This one guy was friends with a cook and would always get free food. Well one time I shoved a whole piece of piping hot lasagna into my mouth. I didn't even feel guilty.

In Jr. high school I would steel food out of my friends pantries. They would bring me to their house to get high and then I would go into the kitchen and hide in the pantry. I would just shove all kinds of treats into my mouth and into my pockets.

locachica73

07-28-2008, 10:11 AM

When my 3 year old niece was here for the past month she would find stuff and pick it up and hide it somewhere. I am still looking for forks and knives. She did the same with my other nieces iPod and a video game. I hope that is not signs of future kleptomania (sp?).

greghead

07-28-2008, 10:13 AM

I don't know what's wrong with me?

In Jr. high school I would steel food out of my friends pantries. They would bring me to their house to get high and then I would go into the kitchen and hide in the pantry. I would just shove all kinds of treats into my mouth and into my pockets.

that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard, lulz

Hopeless Semantic

07-28-2008, 10:15 AM

I think the worst thing we ever did was lift a dozen PS2s off the back of a Target truck. We had an insider who used to work for the receiving dept. and he tipped us off lol. I was 16 and needed money to finance a prom that I had no interest in attending, so I planned the move and it netted us a nifty profit. Funny thing is, the guy @ receiving managed to work at Targets for another 2-3 years before getting his degree.

chairmenmeow47

07-28-2008, 10:26 AM

you were 16 when the ps2 came out?!

Hopeless Semantic

07-28-2008, 10:29 AM

you were 16 when the ps2 came out?!

Sorry, meant the PS lol...I get those two mixed-up. And it wasn't during the launch.

fatbastard

07-28-2008, 10:30 AM

...i once was caught at target jacking a bunch of dvd's(I was deep in a drug twist and needed cash...bad times.). the security ended up meeting me in the parking lot and i made a run for it. one of them tackled me sending me to the ground headfirst splitting my chin wide open. so they dragged me back through target to the loss prevention office with blood pouring from my chin onto the freshly waxed floor with all these customers looking at me while i was screaming "look what these faggots just did to me!someone call the fucking cops"...well they did, and they came, and since i was a minor at the time they released me back to my mom instead of hauling my dumbass to jail. a couple of weeks later i got the summons from the state with the projected fine which i expected but then i got a letter from targets headquarters stating that i had to pay them a fine of 600.00. i wrote them back stating that they should fuck themselves and that i wasnt paying shit and that i would threaten to sue them on behalf of the 'overzealous methods' used by their security detail at the store... pretty much trying to start a pissing match, this worked pretty well with the letters i wrote to the UN and PBS but i wasnt expecting much leniancy from target. well expecting a letter with some sort of "no, were gonna sue you!" statement, i was surprised to find an apology and theyre choice to drop all fines against me...im glad that experience happened because it sparked off a chain of events that would lead me to get off the hard drugs i was on...but shoplifting is fucking stupid and i will never do it again...

This made my morning.

JustSteve

07-28-2008, 02:37 PM

one time we pulled up to a drive-thru atm and there was $20 sitting in the dispenser. we tried to honk and flag the person ahead of us down, but no luck. we then waited to see if they came back, no luck. then we went inside and waited to speak with someone to return the $20. we figured they could use our ATM receipt to find the person who was before us. so not only do i hate stealing, i've actually waited to return money i've found. i guess some people might think that's stupid, but i know that if i accidentally left $20 in the ATM, i'd want someone to be nice enough to leave it for me.

i once pulled up to an atm and the chick in front of me had left her card in the machine without exiting out of her transaction. i could have continued on with her thing and withdrawn a bunch of money, but of course they would have had cameras on me as i did it, so i wouldn't have gotten away with it anyways. so i took her card out and took it up to the front door to try and slide it through since it was afterhours, figured they'd see it on the ground in the morning. no such luck, those doors were sealed tighter than a...well, i won't go there. ended up just taking it home and shredding it, figured she'd call the bank to say it was lost.

one time while waiting in line for the atm some douchebags came up to me in their highrise bro truck and asked if i wanted to buy a brand new state of the art stereo for cheap. fucking dumbasses, i got their license plate number and followed them for a bit until the police showed up, fucking scumbags.

chairmenmeow47

07-28-2008, 02:50 PM

i once pulled up to an atm and the chick in front of me had left her card in the machine without exiting out of her transaction. i could have continued on with her thing and withdrawn a bunch of money, but of course they would have had cameras on me as i did it, so i wouldn't have gotten away with it anyways. so i took her card out and took it up to the front door to try and slide it through since it was afterhours, figured they'd see it on the ground in the morning. no such luck, those doors were sealed tighter than a...well, i won't go there. ended up just taking it home and shredding it, figured she'd call the bank to say it was lost.

one time while waiting in line for the atm some douchebags came up to me in their highrise bro truck and asked if i wanted to buy a brand new state of the art stereo for cheap. fucking dumbasses, i got their license plate number and followed them for a bit until the police showed up, fucking scumbags.

you rule :thu

and i'm by no means perfect, but i believe in leaving this place a better place than you found it :)

faxman75

07-28-2008, 03:06 PM

Great thread

I was 18 and working at a hospital, living at home making 7.25/hour. I was broke and had to get gas to get to work the next day. I put in my card, then pin number and I put my wallet back in my pocket and looked up and there was no money. It was fall and cool and breezy so I thought it came out of the machine and fell on the ground so I pull forward and search the ground and my car and find nothing. I'm all like WTF? So out of desperation I put an empty envelope in the atm and say I am depositing $20 and then withdraw again. I figure they would just charge me an overdraft fee or something. I go to the bank the next day to straighten things out and i'm told my account has been closed and I need to see the bank manager. She was this irate asian chick who didn't believe a word of my story, told me it was fraud, reported me to chex systems and I got bad credit for the next 7 years. On top of all that she informed me that the ATM sucks the money right back in if you don't take it quick enough. So despite the fact that my money was still in that damn machine and I needed gas to get to work and I really should have had $20 in my account, it was still fraud because I put an empty deposit envelope in the machine. Fuckin' bitch. 7 fucking years of bad credit...it actually ended up getting better after 4 years but still.

Ok, at age 20 I was at the coolest record store in the burbs of chicago called "record swap". While i'm there I see they have Tori Amos bootleg CD's back from the Y Can't Tori Read days. This is a CD she obviously wasn't going to see any money from so I found it ridiculous that they were charging $54 for it. I took the packaging off and walked out the door but the alarm still went off. I stood there arguing wtih the the cops and the guy behind the counter for a good 15 minutes saying I purchased the CD there a year ago. The cop wrote me a ticket for a court date. i pled guilty and did 16 hours community service trash detail. Good times.

drewdrewdrew

08-01-2008, 05:15 PM

In high school I used to hang out with a bunch of guys who partied alot. (you know what I mean, the "popular" kids and all that shit) And, with any high school party, the problem is always how are we getting beer?

For like two years we went to the same store, an alberstons by my house, and did beer runs. literally every other weekend we would steal at least three cases and run out the back door. Knock on wood, none of us ever got caught, but we stole SO much money in booze.

Ironically, about a week ago one of the guys I used to hang out with alot during this time was at Wal Mart and he tried to steal a mikes hard lemonade 6 pack for his girlfriend. He got busted with a minor in possesion (we are 19 now) and petty larceny. Shit sucks.

fourty oz

08-01-2008, 05:17 PM

man people actully expect to pay 30 dollars for a new era lid? haha plz

Pixiessp

08-02-2008, 01:15 AM

I bust the bastards that try to run out the back door with beer/liquor at my store. had a few put in the pokey too. i eat shoplifters for lunch and poop them out in the evening.

Pixiessp

08-02-2008, 08:59 AM

I work at a starbucks that sells lots and lots of CDs. So yeah, we shoplift the fuck out of that place. Right now I'm at about 75-ish CDs....and 2 DVDs

that's horrible!! I do despise Starbucks but still.

Memorial_07

08-02-2008, 09:00 AM

yes i did.
i just followed one of my buddies and helped him steal stuff...
that's about it.

Blinken

08-02-2008, 09:13 AM

During my freshman year I would steal my textbooks for college, saved a shitload of money. Then they decided to put cameras in the book store and ban backpacks my second year.

allyjoy

08-02-2008, 11:01 AM

My friend's daughter just got caught shoplifting. She's 16 and she was stealing accessories from forever 21. I don't understand it because her parents give her everything: iPhone, driving lessons, private school education. She doesn't have a job or any real responsibilities, she gets to go out with her friends... I just don't get why she would. Luckily, she didn't get arrested, but my friend ended up with a $500 fine from the store for "damages" because her daughter did something stupid.

RotationSlimWang

08-03-2008, 11:35 AM

Pretty sure I win this thread a few times over, but I think I already told the one story on here before and if not it's fucking long so bleh.

bluemamba

08-03-2008, 11:55 AM

I took soo many CDs today, needed to make up for the last few days.

aha i see you were successful in your small heist today.

zenidogx

08-03-2008, 12:08 PM

shoplifting? like stealing from stores. that's for middle school kids.

i do steal, though. i just filled up my 60 gig ipod. maybe less than 5 gigs of that music i actually purchased.

Pixiessp

08-03-2008, 12:10 PM

are there no security cameras in your store? what you are doing is wrong!
you will burn in hell sbessiso!! repent!!! repent!!!

zenidogx

08-03-2008, 12:14 PM

To clarify, I don't go to random stores and shop-lift, I steal from the starbucks that I work at. Fuck Starbucks!

i didn't read your post that came before me.
stealing from work is another thing. especially if you're boss is an ass. or if you work for a monster like starbucks.

Your starbucks sells a large selection of Cd's?? the ones out here where i live sell only like 5 or 10 artist. thats it.

BROKENDOLL

08-03-2008, 12:34 PM

To clarify, I don't go to random stores and shop-lift, I steal from the starbucks that I work at. Fuck Starbucks! sbessiso, tsk,tsk...biting from the hand that feeds you...

Pixiessp

08-03-2008, 12:36 PM

shoplifting leads to burglery which leads to armed robbery which leads to assault with a deadly weapon which then leads to murder which will land you in prison at some point and you having to guard your pooper oh wait............now I get it. carry on.

sbessiso

08-03-2008, 12:37 PM

Oh stop it you! I think I heart you Pixie

Pixiessp

08-03-2008, 12:40 PM

I heart you too sbessiso.

sbessiso

08-03-2008, 12:42 PM

that makes you like one of like three

and I mean, I fully realize that the stealing is wrong, I just can't stop, which is why i'm very serious about taking an extended break after today

sonofhal

08-03-2008, 12:44 PM

Lets hope that when they do have to let someone go because of stockloss, that it's your sorry thieving ass that gets the chop.

Also, admitting to criminal offences on a public message board that also includes photo's of you is pretty fucking dumb. Are you hoping everyone else that works for starbucks is as morally bankrupt as you?

Roadkillhighway951

08-04-2008, 09:58 AM

shoplifting will guarantee a hands free environment

Heresy

08-04-2008, 10:42 AM

I've never shoplifted, but knew a few people in school who did. They went around bragging to other students. They both got caught in the end.

canexplain

08-04-2008, 11:21 AM

wow gunz is the worst on here lol .... i stoll a bunch of paper media from a store by us ... they delivered the media in front of a store each day, right down from a doughnut store my partent owned ... so in the morning i would go to the mags, or newspapers, etc that had anti govt stuff in it, and i would hand it out to my friends .. mind you,this was maybe 1965 so a bit beyond the curve... i thought i was doing it for my country, but it was just stealing .. my mom made me take all the stuff i had from ripping it off from the parmacy, and they said , good for my mom, that was the last thing i ever stole ... it was for the "cause" even 40 years ago, but that is just a lame excuse ... x****

algunz

08-06-2008, 10:50 PM

A neighbor was telling me the other day about when they worked for a paper company. They made that printer paper with the holes on the side that ran through at a constant. They would take reams of perfectly good paper to the recycler and get money for beer and what not. I thought that was funny.

send me ctrpllrs

08-07-2008, 02:37 PM

I work for Starbucks too... we don't get good CD's at my store. I'm cool with my 30% discount though.

TheGunner'sDream

08-26-2008, 12:01 AM

I have shoplifted before (who hasn't??) but after i felt really guilty. The only way i don't feel guilty is if they are totally overpricing the object.

faxman75

08-31-2008, 08:38 AM

I've stole. At one point I was at my favorite record store and they were charging $50 for a Tori Amos bootleg and I figured since she doesn't get any money from the sale of a bootleg, the store doesn't deserve any money either. I took off the plastic packaging and thought I was gold. I get to the door and the alarm goes off. Fuck. I get into an argument with the owner, telling him I purchased the CD a year prior and he says bullshit the cops are on the way and blocks the door. The cops get there, we start shouting obscenities back and forth at each other. The cop writes me a ticket with a court date. I contemplate pleading innocent just to see how he can prove I stole it but at the last minute I plea guilty and they gave me 16 hours community service picking up garbage and storm debris for the public works. I was 18 when that happened.

I think around age 20 I started walking around my neighborhood checking for unlocked cars, me and some freinds did this a few times. It was amazing how many people left their cars unlocked. Ultimately ended up feeling bad because we stole some kids bookbag with all his college books. He was a huge star wars nerd so I know he had life rough as it was. We would find jackets, cell phones and even a bag of weed once. I was so bright I would wear the stolen jacket around town. What a punk.

I remember stealing when I was real young too. I started with those free pens they put in ladys wallets. My mom busted me, made me bring it back to the store and apologize. That usually teaches kids to not steal but it only taught me to be more clever. I was probably 8 years old or less at that point. I remember another time around age 9 or so I stole a can of silly string. I got in big trouble again from mom. She purchased it for me and knew she only got me one can and asked me where the 2nd one came from. busted.

I have a friend who steals books all the time at boarders. She then sells them on ebay. She simply goes into boarders and fills up her whole book bag and then throws them on ebay. She's a bit more ballzy than me.

I have a friend who steals books all the time at boarders. She then sells them on ebay. She simply goes into boarders and fills up her whole book bag and then throws them on ebay. She's a bit more ballzy than me.
A real class act right there.

orbit

08-31-2008, 03:52 PM

i wonder if she could get some engineering books for me.

i need to save some money.

guest-1185

08-31-2008, 05:49 PM

i didn't read your post that came before me.
stealing from work is another thing. especially if you're boss is an ass. or if you work for a monster like starbucks.

Yep. I used to screw my boss out of quite a bit of money every shift. While I normally frown down on such behavior, my boss was a total cunt so I had no reservations padding my pockets at her expense.

I've also stolen a few retail things but looking back, the risk/reward totally wasn't worth it.

I'm sure she could. She's been doing it for years. She claims to make $60 a week or so doing it.

faxman75

09-01-2008, 07:38 AM

I used to steal newspapers too. On the way to school I would just snatch a paper from someones front porch. Sometimes when I had to buy it, I would just take them all and give them to people in school who wanted to read it.

algunz

09-01-2008, 09:19 AM

Aren't you declaring bankruptcy faxman? This stinks of karma. :)

bluemamba

09-01-2008, 09:30 AM

LMAO!!!

Pixiessp

09-01-2008, 09:31 AM

you're all going to hell!! to hell I tell you!!!!

keep2thestreets

09-01-2008, 09:52 PM

"thou shall not steal if there is a direct victim"

-Scoobius pip

I use to take Gillette fusion razors from grocery stores

there like $15 for 4 !!

leo01g

09-01-2008, 09:54 PM

those bad boys last for months though!

leo01g

09-01-2008, 09:55 PM

I'm sure she could. She's been doing it for years. She claims to make $60 a week or so doing it.

I grew up in the 90's. Remember Pokemon? Well if you recall those holographics were like status symbols in elementary school (specifically 3rd through 5th for me). Well me and my friend James's parents would not dole out 30-90 dollars for the big ticket holographics. So what did we do? We went to the flea market where they had them in binders for sale, and ripped them off has hard as we could every other weekend or so. Then you had the booster packs in the dollar store, and k-mart which we stole from as well.

Other than that I haven't really stolen anything. The two exceptions is when I worked at urbanoutfitters for a summer and stole a pair of shorts and a leather tie. And the handful of times were stoned and broke, so we ventured into the ocean food mart to qwell our hunger.

amyzzz

09-02-2008, 12:28 PM

I stole a sticker that fell off an item of clothing in Dillard's once, and I got busted. This saleslady followed me all the way out into the mall and made me cry. I didn't steal anything after that.

miscorrections

09-02-2008, 01:40 PM

For a sticker? That is an intense salesperson.

amyzzz

09-02-2008, 01:48 PM

No shit. I guess it worked though.

faxman75

09-02-2008, 01:51 PM

Aren't you declaring bankruptcy faxman? This stinks of karma. :)

yeah but I would have to be upset or sad or something about the bankruptcy. I'm happy. I'm having a great year. Not to mention I don't believe in karma. I was just a young punk. I grew up by around 26 once I moved to arizona and was living on my own. No gods or karmas for me though.

algunz

09-02-2008, 02:14 PM

What about chakras?

faxman75

09-02-2008, 02:58 PM

whooah, no way!

algunz

09-02-2008, 04:42 PM

That's too bad.

algunz

09-06-2008, 10:18 PM

Don't steal this thread, you bastard.

guest-1185

09-06-2008, 11:11 PM

Srsly, you win Most Ineffective Spammer Ever.

http://www.shoppe.ca/spam07.jpg

quicksand

09-07-2008, 11:40 AM

stole one of these on friday
http://www.imagearea.co.uk/html_images/6521a.jpg

algunz

09-12-2008, 05:33 PM

I stole a bottle of jasmine body spray today.

When the opportunity arises, I just can't resist. It's kind of ridiculous.

bluemamba

09-12-2008, 06:36 PM

yeah but I would have to be upset or sad or something about the bankruptcy. I'm happy. I'm having a great year. Not to mention I don't believe in karma. I was just a young punk. I grew up by around 26 once I moved to arizona and was living on my own. No gods or karmas for me though.

I thought bankruptcy was suppose to be a bad thing.

guest-1185

09-12-2008, 10:15 PM

Snap, sticky fingers around here.

Pixiessp

09-13-2008, 10:23 AM

Don't ever come into Longs to steal!!! Or is it CVS? or Walgreens?

algunz

09-13-2008, 04:26 PM

I can safely say that I have used my 5 finger discount in all the above establishments.

miscorrections

09-13-2008, 05:04 PM

Role model alert.

algunz

09-13-2008, 09:18 PM

I didn't know you felt the need to emulate me, mis. That's very flattering.

miscorrections

09-13-2008, 09:24 PM

Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Put records in my clothes

Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Pass me back man

Go to a record store
And put it in my clothes and
Walk past that record man
Got to have the sticky hands

CalmerThanYou

09-16-2008, 07:46 PM

What the fuck is you gonna do?
What the fuck is you gonna do about it?

NOTHING.

CHEIF SHAMAN MORRISON

09-27-2008, 11:35 AM

dont steal from sears. they've got a bunch of undercover mexicans looking for shoplifters.
i got fucked stealing a lighter....

RotationSlimWang

09-27-2008, 12:15 PM

I stole a bottle of jasmine body spray today.

When the opportunity arises, I just can't resist. It's kind of ridiculous.

This is incredibly juvenile, you know that, right? Like, even I think it's juvenile.

apostle2

09-27-2008, 02:37 PM

because every starbucks employee I know is going to randomly come on a relatively unpopular message board and decide to bust somebody whose name they don't know for taking cd's from a coffee shop on the other side of the country.

sbessiso

09-27-2008, 03:32 PM

I've since delteted those posts though, it wouldve been nice if you didnt repost them coofal, but whatever

bluemamba

09-27-2008, 05:11 PM

If you were to get busted on this message board, youd be the most unlucky person i know. And even if that, worse thing that would happen to you is probably termination. Im sure theres plenty of better jobs out there than Starbucks.

sbessiso

09-27-2008, 05:12 PM

Yeah seriously, I don't know how much of my soul is even left but it gets raped everytime i'm there. but job hunting blowsss

algunz

09-28-2008, 08:36 AM

This is incredibly juvenile, you know that, right? Like, even I think it's juvenile.

I know. I know. I knnnnoooowww.

I say while jumping up and down and stomping my feet.

Courtney

09-28-2008, 10:23 AM

I don't think I've ever encountered a "body spray" that was even remotely appealing in scent.

bluemamba

09-28-2008, 11:50 AM

Yeah seriously, I don't know how much of my soul is even left but it gets raped everytime i'm there. but job hunting blowsss

You work full time?? There are some better jobs out there that make you do less work. I would hate to work at Starbucks in the mornings. That shift must suck.

algunz

09-28-2008, 06:36 PM

I don't think I've ever encountered a "body spray" that was even remotely appealing in scent.

giggle, I guess that's why I stole it. They are all pretty crappy. They are just convenient to have in the car. Sometimes after a full day in a hot classroom anything smells better.

paulb

09-29-2008, 02:19 AM

I recently found 20 bucks on the floor at a bar....quickly picked it up without anyone seeing, then stood at the bar, waiting for a drink, and the girl next to me, had 2 drinks in front of her, then i saw her lookin all around, couldnt find her cash.... had to pay with a credit card... i felt really bad, cause i clearly just jacked her money...

faxman75

09-29-2008, 06:31 AM

Classy :) A true cocksman would have used the twenty to purchase her those drinks.

chairmenmeow47

09-29-2008, 08:55 AM

I don't think I've ever encountered a "body spray" that was even remotely appealing in scent.

PREACH ON, COURTNEY!!!

they all generally smell like fruity strippers.

RotationSlimWang

09-29-2008, 08:57 AM

Strippers smell like cheap perfume, cocaine, and expensive semen.

marooko

09-29-2008, 09:00 AM

I don't understand it because her parents give her everything: iPhone, driving lessons, private school education. She doesn't have a job or any real responsibilities, she gets to go out with her friends... .

im guessing this is exactly why. none of this means anything to her. its just there. the no responsibilities and not working for anything just enforces the disrespect for other people property. but thats just my opinion.

ive stolen things, but now that i know what it is to work for something and have it stolen from you, i have a different perspective.

forgot to add. fucking thieves!!! (this is for all the proponents of shoplifting)

amyzzz

09-29-2008, 12:17 PM

Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Put records in my clothes

Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Go to the record store
Pass me back man

Go to a record store
And put it in my clothes and
Walk past that record man
Got to have the sticky hands
What the fuck is you gonna do?
What the fuck is you gonna do about it, nuthin.

frozen pilgrim

09-29-2008, 12:19 PM

stealing from a department store or major chain, I don't care about. I generally don't myself, just because I have better ways of getting a thrill. people who steal from independently owned and operated stores deserve to have their hands cut off.

paganman7

09-29-2008, 12:39 PM

Wait a second 'gunz...aren't you an elementary school teacher? How can you look into the eyes of your students espousing citizenship, honesty, and integrity knowing that you have this problem?

I genuinely think you need professional help. Especially considering that you know you have this problem, but are seemingly unable to do anything about it.

I'm honestly not judging you, I just feel sympathy for you.

algunz

09-29-2008, 02:54 PM

I teach junior high, not that there's much difference in maturity.

Oh, I need professional help, but it's for so many other reasons.

TFTs = Topics for Therapy

guest-1185

09-29-2008, 07:48 PM

Damn, you've got three times as many posts in this thread as the next closest person. Even on the internetz you gravitate toward thivery. By chance do you download a shit ton of music or is it more of a physical object thing?

miscorrections

09-29-2008, 08:10 PM

Chimes sing Sunday morn
Today's the day shes sworn
To steal what she never could own
And race from this hole she calls home

algunz

09-29-2008, 08:28 PM

By chance do you download a shit ton of music or is it more of a physical object thing?

No illegal downloading on my part. That's too easy.

fiyahhh!

09-29-2008, 09:49 PM

Learn to love me
Assemble the ways
Now, today, tomorrow and always
My only weakness is a list of crime
My only weakness is ... well, never mind, never mind

Oh, shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world
Hand it over
Hand it over
Hand it over

Learn to love me
And assemble the ways
Now, today, tomorrow, and always
My only weakness is a listed crime
But last night the plans of a future war
Was all I saw on Channel Four

Shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world
Hand it over
Hand it over
Hand it over

A heartless hand on my shoulder
A push - and it's over
Alabaster crashes down
(Six months is a long time)
Tried living in the real world
Instead of a shell
But before I began ...
I was bored before I even began

Shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world
Unite and take over
Shoplifters of the world
Take over

I watched a movie yesterday called "The Pleasure of Being Robbed." It was interesting, certainly not a great movie but thought provoking. The protagonist seemed to steal people's stuff just so she could have a little taste or view into other people's lives. It made me wonder . . . what is my motivation? I guess it's just a game. I looked back and could only come up with one time where I did it out of necessity. In Europe, I stole a prepackaged sandwich and an apple.

ElBlueblazer

11-18-2008, 11:24 PM

i work at a retail store that caters to Douche bag bros and big scary black women,, so for sure i deal with scumbag thiefs!!!

i catch bitches stealing all the time.. im way too lazy to press charges, so i just tell them to hit the bricks,, as long as i get the shit back im cool..

i cant completely hate them,cause when i was a kid id steal G.I JOE's from toysrus!!!

Pixiessp

11-18-2008, 11:36 PM

I said it before and i will say it again....you are all going to the hell!!!

to the hell I tell you!!

BROKENDOLL

11-19-2008, 12:30 AM

I said it before and i will say it again....you are all going to the hell!!!

to the hell I tell you!! Hopefully they'll redeem themselves before Coachella!

tigermilkboy

11-23-2008, 08:51 PM

I was a store manager of the night shift of a large London supermarket. It was the best job ever! I ate like a king for a year-think I gained 20 lbs, thats why I had to stop. Pickled Onion Munster Munch and Cheesecakes are no kind of long term diet plan. Yes I was had horrible munchies around that time!!!

algunz

02-27-2009, 02:38 PM

I had a clean opportunity today, and I chose to refrain. You all have become a voice in my conscience. Are you happy now?

Sleepingrock

02-27-2009, 02:45 PM

...i once was caught at target jacking a bunch of dvd's(I was deep in a drug twist and needed cash...bad times.). the security ended up meeting me in the parking lot and i made a run for it. one of them tackled me sending me to the ground headfirst splitting my chin wide open. so they dragged me back through target to the loss prevention office with blood pouring from my chin onto the freshly waxed floor with all these customers looking at me while i was screaming "look what these faggots just did to me!someone call the fucking cops"...well they did, and they came, and since i was a minor at the time they released me back to my mom instead of hauling my dumbass to jail. a couple of weeks later i got the summons from the state with the projected fine which i expected but then i got a letter from targets headquarters stating that i had to pay them a fine of 600.00. i wrote them back stating that they should fuck themselves and that i wasnt paying shit and that i would threaten to sue them on behalf of the 'overzealous methods' used by their security detail at the store... pretty much trying to start a pissing match, this worked pretty well with the letters i wrote to the UN and PBS but i wasnt expecting much leniancy from target. well expecting a letter with some sort of "no, were gonna sue you!" statement, i was surprised to find an apology and theyre choice to drop all fines against me...im glad that experience happened because it sparked off a chain of events that would lead me to get off the hard drugs i was on...but shoplifting is fucking stupid and i will never do it again...

Is that true??

Either way... Great story

My shoplifting experience... We were leaving Zellers we just screwing around and this one girl put panties in my hoodie without me looking so i left the store and noticed i had womens undies in my hoodie...So i put it up my sleeve and sneaked inside Zellers and put in on the rack without any1 noticing!!

Pixiessp

02-27-2009, 05:56 PM

I had a clean opportunity today, and I chose to refrain. You all have become a voice in my conscience. Are you happy now?

Yes. :thu

prisss

03-01-2009, 08:15 AM

I have stolen about $12,000 worth of funiture from ikea, honest to god. No more information though.... Seriously walked right out the door with stuff about 3 seperate times. Once I even convinced 4 of the people there to help me get some of the stuff into my car(when I had one) and tipped them. No lie.

how the fuck could you steal from ikea?!

prisss

03-01-2009, 11:59 AM

I don't know what's wrong with me?

In Jr. high school I would steel food out of my friends pantries. They would bring me to their house to get high and then I would go into the kitchen and hide in the pantry. I would just shove all kinds of treats into my mouth and into my pockets.

that's the funniest shit ever. LMAO haha

WilliamTaft

03-01-2009, 01:24 PM

i just steal hearts.
sometimes if i feel really rebelious, i'll steal a kiss.

or a gun.

Sleepingrock

03-01-2009, 03:28 PM

i just steal hearts.
sometimes if i feel really rebelious, i'll steal a kiss.

or a gun.

Isnt that called sexual assault?

Vic Viper

03-01-2009, 04:42 PM

Stole $8000 worth of electronics from a former employer. Well, at least thats what they charged me with.

Was getting help from a girl who worked there (I had left a month or so prior) who essentially pulled the item(s) from storage and made like she was going to be placing it in the back warehouse to hold for a customer coming to pick it up. About an hour or so before close, she would open the back loading door, slide the item out (usually some flat screen TV or Xbox 360s) and hide it behind the dumpsters. I'd swoop by and collect it, sell it on Craigslist. Made a few grand doing this.

Basically we got greedy and they caught us on camera (nobody ever watched the cameras, I knew this for a fact) but I think once stuff started disappearing at a faster rate, they caught on and started looking. They almost got us to admit to shit we HADN'T taken, but we fought them on that. I don't know how their security policies are there now, but everyone with half a brain jacked shit constantly. Liquor, iPods, Videogames, etc etc.

Walked away with restitution, 2 nights in jail, 2 years of probation, 60 hours of community service and had to take classes on "Financial Planning".

The funniest part is that nobody would believe us that we stole the stuff for money to pay off debts. Everyone was convinced we were trying to fund a drug habit.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 06:47 AM

I know people who make a living shoplifting, i myself have done my fair share of shoplifting when money is tight. Everyone always thinks that if you're jacking stuff it's to support a habbit, i use to jack stuff to pay rent. One time i didn't have a bed and i needed one obviously, so i went and i stole an entire futton couch. Sometimes you have to do whatever it takes to get by even if it is illegal.

Cherita Chen

03-02-2009, 06:49 AM

I wanna hear the story behind the jacked futon!!

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 06:53 AM

how the fuck could you steal from ikea?!

i believe him because of the way he said it, "I walked out the front door". That is how i have stole pretty much everything i have ever stole, walked right out the front door with product in hand. Just gotta know how to steal stuff it's just like any other trade, accept there is no school for it.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 06:58 AM

I wanna hear the story behind the jacked futon!!

I wont say the store name but it is one of the biggest national chains in the country. I went in to where they kept the futons and found the one i wanted, when you are stealing might as well get the best one you can since it's free. Then i went got a cart and found a worker and asked him to help me load it onto the cart, after he helped me he took off and i pushed it right out the front door and said by to the lady checking receipts, she said by have a nice day, then put the futon in my car and drove home. You should have seen the look on my roomates face, because he knew i didn't have money and couldn't believe i actually had a futon.

Sleepingrock

03-02-2009, 07:10 PM

Classy :) A true cocksman would have used the twenty to purchase her those drinks.

Which inturn coulda = WHOOPIE!

Proof that stealing a chicks 20$ = not good plan

tricorne

03-02-2009, 07:15 PM

i believe him because of the way he said it, "I walked out the front door". That is how i have stole pretty much everything i have ever stole, walked right out the front door with product in hand. Just gotta know how to steal stuff it's just like any other trade, accept there is no school for it.

That's because schools are there to teach people how to be productive members of society. Productive members of society that can purchase the things they desire instead of maintaining themselves and their lifestyles by being about as cunning as a bratty fourteen year old in Claire's who can't afford a clip-on navel ring. Grow up.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 08:41 PM

That's because schools are there to teach people how to be productive members of society. Productive members of society that can purchase the things they desire instead of maintaining themselves and their lifestyles by being about as cunning as a bratty fourteen year old in Claire's who can't afford a clip-on navel ring. Grow up.

haha i am a productive member of society, i hold down a 45hour a week job and pay taxes just like the rest of society. In my opinion since the government steals my money and big corporations are what squeeze the life and creativity out of everyone i am entitled to some free shit. So don't get mad you don't have free futons, digital cameras, bose ipod docks, blue ray players and lap tops. Just because you choose to pay for things and i choose to take a risk and steal things, there is no need to put me down. There's most likely plenty of shit you do in your life i could talk shit on if i knew them, but i don't judge people.

tricorne

03-02-2009, 08:49 PM

I can't help but feel that I'd be every bit as successful as you are, if only I had a futon. That's how you know you've made it, right? Dorm room furniture. You're a fucking schmuck.

Vic Viper

03-02-2009, 08:50 PM

That's because schools are there to teach people how to be productive members of society. Productive members of society that can purchase the things they desire instead of maintaining themselves and their lifestyles by being about as cunning as a bratty fourteen year old in Claire's who can't afford a clip-on navel ring. Grow up.
"Productive Members of Society" would also be compassionate understanding people who acknowledge that sometimes "desperate times beget desperate measures" and would they themselves realize that if a situation were dire enough, they might stoop to behaviors that otherwise would repulse them.

But I guess you don't know anything about that. Way to judge somebody you've never met.

tricorne

03-02-2009, 08:52 PM

"Productive Members of Society" would also be compassionate understanding people who acknowledge that sometimes "desperate times beget desperate measures" and would they themselves realize that if a situation were dire enough, they might stoop to behaviors that otherwise would repulse them.

But I guess you don't know anything about that. Way to judge somebody you've never met.

haha i am a productive member of society, i hold down a 45hour a week job and pay taxes just like the rest of society. In my opinion since the government steals my money and big corporations are what squeeze the life and creativity out of everyone i am entitled to some free shit. So don't get mad you don't have free futons, digital cameras, bose ipod docks, blue ray players and lap tops. Just because you choose to pay for things and i choose to take a risk and steal things, there is no need to put me down. There's most likely plenty of shit you do in your life i could talk shit on if i knew them, but i don't judge people.

...

tricorne

03-02-2009, 08:55 PM

"Productive Members of Society" would also be compassionate understanding people who acknowledge that sometimes "desperate times beget desperate measures" and would they themselves realize that if a situation were dire enough, they might stoop to behaviors that otherwise would repulse them.

But I guess you don't know anything about that. Way to judge somebody you've never met.

Also, fuck that. My not being compassionate towards his situation doesn't cause him any harm other than a little vitriol on a message board. Stealing has a victim. They're not remotely analogous.

I pay for the things I buy, and I pay respect to people when they deserve it. And in general, common courtesy whether or not someone deserves it. But when someone speaks so proudly about something like stealing with ease, generally it's not a behavior that would "otherwise repulse them". I harbor absolutely no guilt about my stance.

tricorne

03-02-2009, 08:59 PM

Additionally, when a company makes less money, people lose their jobs. The people without compassion are the ones who aren't thinking about how doing shit like stealing fancy electronics (absolutely not a necessity, I understand your point regarding needing things to live, but that is not the situation at hand) actually is a detriment to other people. Not just CEOs. Not just corporate bigwigs. Those companies are all full of little people, and they're the first ones to be laid off.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 09:03 PM

I can't help but feel that I'd be every bit as successful as you are, if only I had a futon. That's how you know you've made it, right? Dorm room furniture. You're a fucking schmuck.

i don't even own it anymore i own a lot of nicer furniture now, but at that point in my life that was the only way could get a bed. Now that i can afford to pay for the luxury's in life i would like i do, but you seem to have never hit tough times that have made you resort to something you wouldn't normally do to survive. I will admit though, I do feel a sense of pride knowing i got multiple thousands of dollars of things in life for free i would never have been able to afford. So i guess at the root of it i am the scum of america, the people that make them put security devices on expensive electronics, inside dvd's and put security camera's on the liquor at the grocery store. Honestly fuck what you think! Free shit is where it's at.

tricorne

03-02-2009, 09:05 PM

I've hit many a tough time in my life. Not everyone turns into a scumbag from it. I'm finished, though. This is no longer interesting to me.

Cherita Chen

03-02-2009, 09:07 PM

I think the fact that you stole an entire futon just like that is incredible, but I'd be the first to admit that I'm pretty scummy

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 09:08 PM

and with 9,313 post you need a life atleast i do more than sit on a message board, at this point you have made 1,000 post for every coachella and you joined in Feb. of 2007 which makes it even worse.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 09:13 PM

I think the fact that you stole an entire futon just like that is incredible, but I'd be the first to admit that I'm pretty scummy

trust me i wasn't sure i was going to pull it off but i am glad i did many good times with that futon. I am an ex graffiti artist, theft just became a part of how i lived life because i needed paint and i wasn't going to pay for it so fuck it.

ivankay

03-02-2009, 09:16 PM

You steal, you should have no problems when your shit gets stolen.

Distorted_Jungle

03-02-2009, 09:19 PM

You steal, you should have no problems when you're shit gets stolen.

no that is completely different in my opinion, no matter how dumb that sounds. I have only stole things from big corporations ex: Walmart, Home Depot, Target. I would NEVER steal anything from independently owned stores or others personal property, so i'm not a complete scum bag.

ivankay

03-02-2009, 09:28 PM

Someone will always be poorer than you. If you do something to someone else regardless of their wealth, then you must be fine with the same thing happening to you. Otherwise you'd be a hypocrite and that is as bad as it gets for us (even though we...as in humans...do it all the time). i have thought in the past that it was "ok because it won't be missed or was from someone who could afford it", but the problem is basic: taking what isn't yours is wrong. The closest you can come to justifying it is survival, but our (Americans...actually that's a human thing) fucked up notion you need luxuries in order to live is wack delusional. Survival means if you don't have the fruit, you or your family will die.

Distorted_Jungle

03-03-2009, 06:33 AM

Someone will always be poorer than you. If you do something to someone else regardless of their wealth, then you must be fine with the same thing happening to you. Otherwise you'd be a hypocrite and that is as bad as it gets for us (even though we...as in humans...do it all the time). i have thought in the past that it was "ok because it won't be missed or was from someone who could afford it", but the problem is basic: taking what isn't yours is wrong. The closest you can come to justifying it is survival, but our (Americans...actually that's a human thing) fucked up notion you need luxuries in order to live is wack delusional. Survival means if you don't have the fruit, you or your family will die.

i feel you on that and can relate to it, because like i said i stole things when i have fell on hard times before. I would steal things like shampoo, soap, food and any other things needed, some i just wanted like beer and other things of that nature. I just ended up realizing how easy it was to get away with so i figured why not steal things that i can't afford with ot without money. I don't steal things anymore because i have to much in my life to risk over shoplifting and stupid things like that, but i did my fair share.