Suzette Martinez Standring: I am me: What are your descriptions?

Suzette Martinez Standring More Content Now

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Jun 20, 2019 at 10:12 AMJun 20, 2019 at 10:12 AM

Who were you at the end of fifth grade? For that matter, how would you describe yourself today? Lulu, my 11-year-old granddaughter, and each of her classmates shared self-definitions during graduation from Tucker Elementary in Milton, Massachusetts, words that were based on relationships, what they do and personal traits. How insightful it was.

The end of fifth grade marks a growing sense of individuality. “Not being like everyone else” can be both liberating and uncomfortable. Next September, former fifth graders will run with the big dogs of junior high, and what part will self-awareness play?

At Tucker, each child went up to the microphone and described themselves, inspired by Willow Smith’s song, “I Am Me.” In fact, each child used that statement as an introduction. A slide with artwork and their own words was projected onto a big screen as each one spoke.

At times, the kids’ voices were assertive or soft, faltering or fast. From their own words, the marvelous process of growing up was revealed.

Most kids defined themselves by relationship. I am a sister, daughter, cousin, brother or son. I am a friend. It was a pattern often repeated, youngsters defined by their sense of belonging, how they related to others, and their place within a family. Clearly, the family is important as is the power of role modeling. Belonging is primary.

After relationships, came descriptions of roles. Both boys and girls mentioned being basketball and soccer players, animal and nature lovers, and surprisingly, cooks. More boys said they were gamers, while more girls said scientists. There were mathematicians and singers. I am a trumpet player.

Kudos to the creative: (I am a) ninja, memer, joker, and God-lover.

I thought about the last time I described myself in a fun role like them, such as dancer, or gardener or artist, and decided such things don’t happen often enough in my life to be valid. Change ahead.

Last, and less common were words describing personal traits. I am kind. I am trustworthy. Good, bright, funny. I am a winner. Double-jointed made me laugh out loud. But there were less adjectives in this category, perhaps because the children are just beginning a soul journey into becoming.

I hope their words are positive ones as they grow into self-acceptance. As adults, our self-descriptions don’t stop. They can become dark, negative or intractable. We would do well to take a periodic inventory of the words that go into “I am me.”

After the rush of graduations and school celebrations, I bet many would say, “I am tired.” Congratulations to all. Email Suzette Martinez Standring at suzmar@comcast.net.

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