Next Media Animated Lampoons Disaster That is Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark [Watch]

Even if it never makes it to its actual opening, Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark already has a circuitous and frustrating making-of story. A documentary about the troubles — monumental expectations, ballooned record-breaking budgets, four serious injuries to date — would be something akin to Hearts of Darkness, George Hickenlooper’s investigation in what made Apocalypse Now an enormous headache for all involved parties. OK, well, web-slinging isn’t exactly Vietnam, but we’re trying here.

And while we don’t yet have a backstage look at Julie Taymor’s death machine of a musical, we do have a video response of sorts: the inevitable treatment from Taiwan’s Next Media Animation. As always, the computer animations news team delivered at lightspeed (a day!) and stuffed the minute-long feature with the same dumb jokes and sight gags that make these things charming. Metaphors are made literal (the script gets jolted back to life on a hospital bed; two producers tug an enormous cord when they “pull the plug”) and Bono and The Edge are seen stomping mad when the show gets canceled. Their solution? Return to Broadway with a Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson rip-off called, naturally, Bloody Bloody Sunday.