When car companies get desperate, they throw a bunch of, er, mud against the wall to see if any of it sticks. Since Lincoln set out to reinvent itself at the end of last year, lots of mud has indeed been thrown, but not much of it has stuck.

Embedded from nonofficial YouTube account, so it may not work forever. This explains the near-subliminal La Quinta plug at the beginning. Come to think of it, we like the sound of a Lincoln La Quinta. This is probably not a tie-in Lincoln wants to pursue. Anyway, we digress.

The new Lincoln Motor Company launched itself with a high-concept commercial that invoked the marque’s past greatness as prelude to a renaissance. (I examined the ad last December.) “This is about moving forward, by looking back,” it exhorted. By referencing iconic models like the Zephyr and the Continental Mark ll, the spot proclaimed that Lincoln was returning to the business of making true luxury cars worthy of premium status. But almost immediately after this past-as-prelude-to-future idea was seeded, it was replaced by a spot in which a ’90s Town Car was literally torched as the announcer told us that our image of Lincoln is “not what you think.” (I touched on that one in C/D’s Super Bowl ad roundup.) In other words, remember the cool cars and forget the bad ones.

But the problem is—and how the company didn’t realize this before wasting all that money on the first commercial is amazing to me—the target audience for hot, happening new Lincolns doesn’t remember the iconic models because they weren’t even born yet! Ask a luxury car buyer in his or her forties (Lincoln’s primary target) to think of old Lincolns and they’ll likely say “car service,” the exact opposite of what Ford wanted. So they marketers reached for another handful of mud and came up with the Jimmy Fallon “Steer the Script” Super Bowl commercial (discussed here), which was about road trips, not Lincolns. But it didn’t really matter, because any leads that were generated by this hodgepodge of mixed messages couldn’t be filled because of quality-related delays for the MKZ launch.

But now all the quality unpleasantness has been straightened out and we’re free to buy all the MKZs we want. In fact, Lincoln has so many new cars on hand that it’s offering aggressive promotions, such as a complimentary first month’s lease payment. To announce the sale, Lincoln has gone back to the bucket again. This time it’s slinging completely new commercials that have absolutely nothing to do with original launch strategy (and have yet to appear on the company’s official YouTube channel, for whatever that’s worth to you).

In the spot embedded above, we see a guy who represents the MKZ’s target audience pull up in front an apartment complex in his new ride, panoramic sunroof jauntily sliding open. As he waits for his date to emerge, he emits a self-satisfied, devil-may-care smirk that screams “cheesy.” But that shouldn’t come as a surprise, because the guy is actor Chris Elwood. That’s right, with all the talent in the world to choose from, Lincoln went with Brad, the loser in the stoner movie How High, to personify its ideal customer. The woman (Katie Walder from Gilmore Girls) walks out cradling her cute little poochie, whom she intends to bring along. Brad takes one look and immediately conjures images of wanton destruction to the interior of his precious new car, so he punches the pushbutton gear selector and splits, leaving date and dog in the dust. A companion commercial (“Obsession”) follows a similar scenario wherein a MKX owner stops to pick up his golfing buddy but is scared away by thoughts of spilled coffee and donut powder.

Yes, it’s humorous. But what’s the point? When you buy a new Lincoln, you don’t want anyone to mess it up? I doubt there’s a car buyer alive who doesn’t care if their new vehicle gets trashed, whether it’s a Mercedes, a Lincoln, a Toyota, or a Fiat. Does Lincoln really think it will gain market share in the luxury category by trying to preempt pride of ownership? In six short months the brand has gone from touting a truly unique selling proposition (its heritage) to a generic reason to buy that applies to every new car, regardless of its bloodline. And I’d be surprised if the spot didn’t turn off some potential female buyers (that’s no way to treat a lady, Elwood) and animal lovers (at least 35 percent of U.S. households include a dog) along the way. Lincoln recently put Mark LaNeve, the former GM exec credited with saving Cadillac, in charge of its advertising. Maybe he has better quality mud.

Award-winning ad man-cum-auto journalist Don Klein knows a good (or bad) car commercial when he sees one; the Ad Section is his space to tell you what he thinks of the latest spots. The ad’s rating is depicted via the shift pattern at the bottom, but everyone has an opinion when it comes to advertising, so hit Backfires below and tell us what you think, too.