I was devastated when they rejected and ignored me. I felt as though God rejected me. Although I felt like worthless scum, I still kept moving toward God—anyway. I never imagined there could be blessings awaiting me on the other side.

Then my “love” turns negative. This could convert to hatred or depression that takes some form of medication to keep me from harming myself or someone else. Godly Love is a decision, a positive energy force I consciously will toward others. I don’t have that energy in me.

When I finally admit to God who I really am, instead of going away, he showers me with more love than I’ve ever known and meets my needs in ways much larger than I could have provided for myself. Before, when I was filthy, I wanted everything for me; I wanted everyone to look at me. Then when I saw what a mess I really am, I didn’t want anyone to look at me.

The religious leaders wanted to arrest Jesus because they realized he was telling the story against them—they were the wicked farmers. But they were afraid of the crowd, so they left him and went away. (Mark 12:12)

I don’t want to be so busy that I can’t find Jesus. Where are You staying, Jesus? Where can I find You? When I’m busy tying up loose ends at work, can I find You? When I’m preparing dinner tonight for the family, will You be there? If not, where can I find You?