Poor
Planning, Outdated Wills Lead To Family Feuds
Adult Children Can Broach Topic Delicately With Aging Parents

Family
estate lawyer Les Kotzer has seen battles over inheritances
turn very ugly.

In
one instance, a woman broke an expensive crystal vase in
his parking lot. She had bought it for her mother, who passed
away, yet the mother's estate left everything to be sold
-- and the woman's brothers did not want to give the vase
to her. So she smashed it on the ground.

Kotzer
blames all the fireworks on poor estate planning. He said
that by one estimate, 70 percent of Americans don't have
a will, and many of those who do don't keep the documents
up-to-date.

To
illustrate the dangers, he said imagine you're a parent
who decides to leave $10,000 cash to one child and a $10,000
stamp collection to the other.

If
you die years later and haven't reviewed your will, the
stamp collection may have appreciated to $15,000 or $20,000,
meaning the inheritances are no longer equal. That could
create ill will between your children.

Kotzer
said many people don't do any estate planning for a simple
reason: They just don't want to talk about it.

He
said there are some delicate ways for adult children to
broach the topic with aging parents.

For
example, you might say, "Dad, maybe it's time we had
a family meeting. I don't want to know what you own, but
are you organized?" You might mention that you've heard
about disorganized estates where the children couldn't find
everything and assets were lost, and you and your siblings
don't want to have to face those kinds of problems.

Les
Kotzer is the co-author of "The Family Fight: Planning
to Avoid It," and he also has a Web site, FamilyFight.com.