When other ppl get pregnant before you

I’ve Been ttc for a total of a yr and 4 months, 3 months into ttc I did conceive but it ended in a mc at 5wks . And just yesterday I found my younger sister is expecting & they stopped using condoms about 2months ago. I’m happy For her but sad. Mixed emotions . Upset more at myself I guess

Join the club 🙁 We’ve been TTC for almost 3 years. Last August, I MC’ed at 7 weeks, and I’ve seen multiple couples (some who don’t even want kids) get pregnant and have their babies. I’m so happy for them, but mad at my body for not being able to provide us with a baby of our own. It’s hard, but a couple of my friends have told me I’ve been handling it so gracefully, which I appreciate. Deep down I want to scream and cry everytime I hear someone is pregnant though. When will it be my turn?

Ryansgirl: that’s exactly how I feel! I get mad at myself and my body. And yea I say the same things, I’m happy for everybody else but I’m disappointed and ashamed of myself. It’s like wtf?’ And my SO knows that this is something that I’ve been dealing with, he knows how much it hurts me. I’m to the point where I don’t wanna know about babies and I don’t like talking about pregnancy or of who’s expecting. I just feel uncomfortable I guess because it hurts me emotionally .

Mrs.Sawyertobe: it is pretty frustrating and painful. It’s just not fair. Like im actually fixing to ovulate later on today. I already got my +opk yesterday . and I’m starting to feel the early aches of O. So I know by afternoon it’ll be full force. I’ve gotten blood tests done, sonagrams done in April and my so got checked and everything came back normal. I just don’t get it. And without realizing that’s what it’s called but we’ve been doing the sperm meets egg method.

Mrgrz07: I’m not quite as far in my TTC journey – I’m only at about 9 months so far – but I can relate to what you’re saying. I feel like every time I find out about another potential obstacle to conception, I hear about another friend and/or coworker who is expecting.

I completely understand that mix of happiness (because you really are happy for them) and disappointment.

I definitely understand this. I’ve had two losses and while I was experiencing the second one, people with estimated due dates around my first due date started announcing their pregnancies. So, that was about as painful as it gets, to know that not only did I lose my January baby but that when I was losing my April baby, all the January mommas were making excited announcements with pictures of healthy wombs and tiny bumps. I consider shutting down facebook on an every 3 day basis so I can avoid it. Literally 75% of posts are women my age with their kids or their baby bumps. And here’s me, not even allowed to try this month.

Mrgrz07: I totally understand. I wish nothing more for it to happen for you too. Have you tried anything to help you conceive? Acupuncture, herbs, western medicine? Has your DH been tested? I had an HSG last year to see if there was any blockage (all clear apparently!) 2 months before I conceived, and I’ve heard sometimes it “unplugs” you and helps people conceive. Although for me, it was very uncomfortable, and the gyno I’m sure wouldn’t allow people to continue having them anyway. I was giving myself until the end of the year, and then I would look into other options, such as IVF. Adoption is also an option for DH and I, as we have always wanted to adopt, even before knowing about my TTC issues.

LadyBear: yes! I couldn’t conceive for 8 months because of my mc, it threw my hormones off and I wasn’t ovulating. It sucks when it’s one thing after another. My body has been back to normal for probably 3/4months . I go home and cry out of anger and frustration. I’m distant when it comes to the conversation about pregnancy. It doesn’t help that my one and only child is 7& constantly tells me that he wants a baby brother or sister. He’s tired of being bored and alone (his words) I’m getting pressure as it is and I have to hear it from my son as well. I do understand how he feels . My sisters all have 3 kids each and I feel bad for my son. He has everything he wants since he’s an only child, but he needs the companion of other kids. My sisters kids don’t have the privilege to have what my son has since they have more finances with their 3+ kids. I do think that maybe I shouldn’t be selfish since I have my son and he’s well taken care of financially as to where my sisters have multiple kids and they can’t spoil their kids the way I do with my son. Idk, maybe I am asking for too much, am I?

Andthepupmakes3: I totally feel you! I was due on my first born’s birthday. It’s not fair, why couldn’t my body be like everybody else’s. I feel like I’m getting left behind in the dust. I’m 24 and my classmates are already with 2/3 kids and I’m still just with one. I feel left out

Ryansgirl: I hope so too! I’ve gotten my hormones checked and my ovaries and everything came back normal. Even him!i do know after my mc my body did go crazy by not ovulating for 8 months but by the time I went and got tests done my body was “normal” which was 3/4 months ago. So maybe now I’m physical fit . I’ve always wNted to adopt but my so doesn’t have any of his own, I really don’t think he’d sit well with adoption. Im pretty sure he wants his own but who knows when it actually comes down to it

When I was 27 I had my son- who is now six. Since then, I have been diagnosed with PCOS and was told I may have trouble conceiving, but when the time came that we were ready, the DR would help us.

We weren’t officially trying, but stopped using condoms since the morning after our wedding last November. He would always pull out, but we weren’t using condoms. Suprisingly- and very seriously SURPRISINGLY, we found out I got pregnant in April. We were shocked for a couple reasons– first, because we were told we *may* need help, and secondly, because we had a few weeks were I was dealing with something else, and we only did the deed ONCE– which was when we concieved.

The reason I am telling you this– is because for many couple (not using us as my only example)– the moment you stop “trying”, and just go about your business, it’s like some miracle kicks in and they get pregnant.

Another thing to consider– yeast. And I don’t mean a typical vaginal yeast infection. It’s not acknowledged by western medecine, but many of us have a yeast over-growth in our bodies. Candida–

I had just starting doing a cleanse a few weeks before I got pregnant– so I’m not sure that *truly* contributed. And I wasn’t doing the cleanse for pregnancy reasons- I just wanted to do it.

Mrgrz07: I am sorry you are going through this. I can’t relate entirely but I felt very similar feelings when my sister got engaged before me. When we really want something it is natural to feel jealous when others get it before us. That isn’t to say they didn’t want it just as badly. We need to always be tolerant of others situations. I am sorry you’re going through this. Sending well wishes your way.