So one, always mindful,should avoid sensual desires. Letting them go,he'd cross over the floodlike one who, having bailed out the boat, has reached the far shore.

Metta,Retro.

"When we transcend one level of truth, the new level becomes what is true for us. The previous one is now false. What one experiences may not be what is experienced by the world in general, but that may well be truer. (Ven. Nanananda)

“I hope, Anuruddha, that you are all living in concord, with mutual appreciation, without disputing, blending like milk and water, viewing each other with kindly eyes.” (MN 31)

befriend wrote:hi, does anyone know how much merit one would make for refraining from all sexual activity including thinking about sex?

Dear befriend,Many benefits for sure.Love and hate create sorrow, anxiety, sadness, by stop love and hate, one is free from sorrow, anxiety caused by love and hate.Then there are more benefit, when the mind stop to create pleasure by sexual activity, it very easy to create another types of inner pleasure, joy and bliss. The joy and happiness this way is comparable in quality to sexual activity but is more stable, more consistent, and more continuous and doesn't lead to suffering in the future.

I think in the unconscious state, the mind has only one purpose, seeking joy and happiness. When it sees something as happiness, it creates desires, and desires destroy joy and happiness of the moment. I.e, if you feel bored, you want to hang out, but if you observe the moment when it first happens you will see something like this: Oh, so boring, I want something better, if I go out I may feel this and this, also experience this. This attitude is actually running away from reality, every time it is like that, seeking joy and happiness and hiding away from sadness, anxiety, boring moment. Why you need to run away? Why you need to hide from the reality? People can build bunker to protect them from massive bombs, but no bunker can hide you from reality.

Why can't you make friend with it? Why can't you accept it, the reality?

the Buddha transl. Thanissaro wrote:Ananda, there are these five strings of sensuality. Which five? Forms cognizable via the eye — agreeable, pleasing, charming, endearing, fostering desire, enticing. Sounds cognizable via the ear... Aromas cognizable via the nose... Flavors cognizable via the tongue... Tactile sensations cognizable via the body — agreeable, pleasing, charming, endearing, fostering desire, enticing. Now whatever pleasure or happiness arises in dependence on these five strands of sensuality, that is called sensual pleasure. Though some might say, 'That is the highest pleasure that beings experience,' I would not grant them that. Why is that? Because there is another pleasure, more extreme & refined than that.

"And what, Ananda, is another pleasure more extreme & refined than that? There is the case where a monk — quite withdrawn from sensual pleasures, withdrawn from unskillful qualities — enters & remains in the first jhana: rapture & pleasure born from withdrawal, accompanied by directed thought & evaluation. This is another pleasure more extreme & refined than that. Though some might say, 'That is the highest pleasure that beings experience,' I would not grant them that. Why is that? Because there is another pleasure, more extreme & refined than that.From: Bahuvedaniya Sutta: Many Things to be Experienced" (MN 59)translated from the Pali by Thanissaro Bhikkhu