On the Cubs

10 quick suggestions for new Chicago Cubs owner

August 22, 2009|By Paul Sullivan

LOS ANGELES — Like a man learning he has won the lotto while falling out of an airplane, Tom Ricketts finally gets his hands on the Cubs in mid-plunge.

There's not much Ricketts can do to change this mind-numbing free-fall this season, but here are 10 things he can do in the near future to alter the course of Cubs history when his ownership group officially takes control of the franchise:

1. Have a prickly pear margarita with Lou Piniella: Find out if the Cubs manager really wants to return in 2010, and if not, what he can do to convince him to change his mind.

Though Piniella never has said he does not want to return, speculation has run rampant about his future plans. He has left both the Mariners and Rays before the final year of contracts.

Sit down with Piniella and get the news from the horse's mouth. The Cubs would be crazy to go bland again after three years of Piniella-watching.

2. Give Jim Hendry an ultimatum: Chairman Crane Kenney handed the general manager a four-year extension through 2012 in October after a 97-victory season, despite knowing a new owner eventually would inherit the deal. Then he watched the Cubs regress to near .500 status. Some now are calling for Hendry's head, as they did in '05 and '06.

Most of the off-season acquisitions Hendry has made have blown up in his face, some spectacularly (Kevin Gregg), some noisily (Milton Bradley) and some quietly (Aaron Miles, Joey Gathright, Luis Vizcaino).

Give Hendry the option of a new, one-year deal with more control, or the option of a reassignment to Ed Lynch-ville (i.e., a grossly overpaid scout). Fix things now, or take the money and run.

3. Thank Crane Kenney, tell him good-bye: He helped generate revenues at Wrigley Field, and the Captain Morgan Club is a huge success.

Thanks.

But he also oversaw ticket pricing changes that forced the average fan to stay at home and watch the Cubs on TV. Many are fortunate to be able to attend one game with their family.

Kenney desperately wants to turn Wrigley Field into Fenway Park. Sorry, but this is Chicago, not Boston. Later.

4. Send a memo to Carlos Zambrano: "We will gladly trade you to another team if you kindly would agree to waive your no-trade clause. We understand you did not feel it was necessary to follow the training routine prescribed to you by our staff, after receiving a $91.5 million contract with no-trade provisions in 2007.

"Published reports indicate you would play for Boston, the White Sox or the Los Angeles Dodgers. With your permission, we would like to begin talks with these teams in hopes of finding one with a training staff that best suits your needs."

5. Hire a team shrink: Zambrano probably could use one for himself, but let's assume a team psychologist also can work with Milton Bradley, who told us exactly what to expect in spring training when discussing his past.

"Yes, I've made mistakes," he admitted. "Yes, I have handled things improperly in the past. I was immature. I was childish. That's how I reacted. My self-defense mechanism was to lash out, and maybe it was my own insecurity. I didn't know how to handle it, and internalize it and use it for good like I did last year."

Perfect scouting report for Bradley's first season in Chicago. Perhaps someone can help him to relax more.

6. Ditch the Triangle: The proposed Triangle Building that would bring more parking, restaurants and a Cubs Hall of Fame to the west side of the ballpark is unnecessary.

Improve the food selection inside the park and forget about clogging the neighborhood with more cars emptying out onto Clark Street.

And a Hall of Fame for a team that hasn't won a World Series since 1908? Please. Save the money and turn the triangle lot into a game-day street-fest, as the NHL did during the Winter Classic.

7. Jumbotron for night games: Buy out a rooftop club and put the thing up already. Attend a night game at Dodger Stadium and see how a well-used Jumbotron can affect the energy level of the crowd. Hire Charles Steinberg, a pioneer in the melding of pop music and baseball highlights on big-screen video boards in Boston and L.A. His brief history of Yankees-Red Sox, accompanied by the Beatles' "Day in the Life," is a classic.

8. Lower beer prices at Wrigley: It was one of the first things Arte Moreno did when he took over the Angels. Fans love Arte Moreno.

Also, continue to encourage fans to report idiots by texting security on their cell phones when someone is out of control in their area. Fans are often reluctant to get involved, but a text alert to security can alert them to over-served morons who are bothering people around them. Other ballparks already do this.

9. Listen to your customers: Cubs fans are remarkably patient, considering they have gone 101 years without a championship, but they have become very impatient with this particular club.

Create the position of a fan liaison, someone who the average fan can contact and will listen to concerns about players, the ballpark, etc.

10. Stay out of the clubhouse: The Cubs players have seen enough of Kenney roaming through the clubhouse, eating in the team kitchen or hanging on the field with friends during pregame warm-ups.

The new head of the Cubs should respect that this is the players' workplace. No one needs the boss acting like he's "one of the guys."