I guess I should probably tell you that my driveway burrito place now has tortas and barbacoa and I think something else I forgot.

Not that I can get any, because they're all the way at the end of the driveway.

PS also, on that census bureau thing, I actually didn't have answers for any of their 'security questions,' so I had to make up something really stupid I guess I shouldn't tell because it's my stupid security question. But it was along the lines of my favorite song being "a music song."

We had a major thunder storm last night. The storm interferred with our satellite reception, so no TV. Because of the propinquity of the thunder and lightning I shut off my computer, so no computer and no TV. I read a book instead. Then the power went out. No computer, no TV and no light to read by. I was reduced to the expediency of wandering into the living room and participating in an actual conversation with my wife. I could have gone out the motor home, started the generator and read out there, but the carpet is wet. Is there no end to my troubles?

__________________Old Pain In The Ass says: I am on a mission from God to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable; to bring faith to the doubtful and doubt to the faithful.

And, I would point out his pale-skinned white-bread Americanness but here in Oklahoma, he may well have tribal membership and consider himself Native American despite his Germanic last name. He works alone too. Seems to me he could get a lot more done if he would hire a bunch of Guatemalans, Mexicans, or maybe a Honduran to help him out like most all of the other lawn services do.

__________________Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.--W.C. Fields

It was hot yesterday. And I had to stand out in it with relatives who wanted to watch their kids. Seriously, who turned off the AC and made outside so crappy? I ended up sneaking back into the house and sitting next to a fan over the AC vent while watching TV.

I think more 3rd world countries could be successful if they just adopted air conditioning. Wouldn't hurt my relatives either.

__________________
Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night. Light a man on fire and he'll be warm the rest of his life.

Back in the day people had to do legal research by picking up books with their BARE HANDS.

Today we have Westlaw, which allows near-instant access to virtually all the law in the federal and state systems. You can save your research to folders, organizable in any way you see fit. You can give other Westlaw users access to the information in your folders, with the option of making another user a full "contributor" or a mere "reviewer."

However, some Westlaw operations that can and should take but a single step actually take two or even three steps.

I lost count of how many of my surfboards snapped or got otherwise destroyed. It's not so much the expense that is the problem. I saved a lot of money by building them myself. Still, every loss is a tragedy.

One day I did a bottom turn at Sandon Point and my best ever kneeboard went to pieces. I was surprised that the front half barely missed my face as it went its own way. No other board inflicted more bloody noses and black eyes than this one. You'd think that it would insist on at least tearing a gash in me as it finally expired. The end of this one was particularly traumatic because while the board was evil, it also was the best handling board I ever had. The situation was made even worse by the fact that I had not brought any spares with me and Sandon Point is about 60 kilometres away from where I lived. A lot of that is city traffic too.

Earlier today, I suffered a friend's sandwiches: chicken and cheese. I didn't actually eat any of them of course - but I was in the same room while he ate them.

And he didn't just eat them in a shamefaced way - he tried to justify the choice of ingredients by saying that I was eating tomato and cheese sandwiches (which was true) and that therefore I must agree that tomato and cheese went together well, and I also once ate and admitted to liking some chicken recipe that included tomatoes, so that chicken also goes with tomatoes. Then by logic if AB and AC then necessarily BC.

My lawn guy took out my strawberry, lilies and even a tulip that was two feet back into the flower bed. I called and said not to mow past the air conditioning unit anymore and he still took out the strawberry that managed to grow back.

__________________
"freedom to differ is not limited to things that do not matter much. That would be a mere shadow of freedom. The test of its substance is the right to differ as to things that touch the heart of the existing order."
- Justice Robert Jackson, West Virginia State Board of Ed. v. Barnette

Speaking of strawberries, never buy them at Walmart (a given for most items). They have an expiration date of 2 minutes after you leave the parking lot. The grocery store strawberries at least last a couple of days if you pick the box without fuzzies. When I get strawberries shipped in out of season I expect better.

__________________
Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night. Light a man on fire and he'll be warm the rest of his life.

We're getting new multi-product recycle bins at work. We don't have to separate our paper, plastic, or glass discards, but they want us to remove and throw away all the lids and wash out the containers before placing them in the bins. It's like we have to half their work for them.

We have special recycle/trash combo cans in each of our "right sized workstations" (i.e. open air cubicles). So I have to try and remember if styrofoam plates are recyclable or not whenever I want to throw one away.

The worst is throwing away paper and realizing you put it in the wrong one. So you sit there all day with other people thinking you're a bastard for ruining the earth or you fish it out and transfer it to the appropriate container.

__________________
Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night. Light a man on fire and he'll be warm the rest of his life.

I was on a 2 hour flight the other day and a 4 year old came walking down the aisle and counting off the row numbers. Then in a cute little voice stopped counting at the row right behind me. Doh. Her mom reminded her to not kick the seat in front of her and she played quietly the whole trip. However, I was angst ridden for a good minute or two.

I fell asleep only to wake up with the drink cart 4 rows behind me. So no diet coke for me. I was going to ask for one, but fell asleep again.

The plane landed ahead of time and they didn't lose my luggage.

But no diet coke.

__________________
Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for the night. Light a man on fire and he'll be warm the rest of his life.

I got a new pink otter box for my iPhone and whenever I put it in the pocket of my fancy jeggings* the corners of it get all stained with the dark blue dye of the pants, even though I have washed them several times! It rubs off on its own after a while, but not all the way, and I can't take a picture to show how bad it is because I would have to remove the otter box to take the picture with the phone, which I know from experience is a great way to ruin a manicure.

*Apparently these are some seriously expensive designer somethings that my mom got for free, because once you're rich you don't have to pay for things anymore for some reason.

My job lets me work from home on some shifts and did that today as it was hot and driving in would have been a pain and sweaty, and there would be little to do there. But the company hasn't paid for AC in my apartment so I had to walk down to the cellar and get fans and turn them on. I was still too hot in my shorts and tank top while working at my own desk and watching TV.

Also, over the past month or so I have been avoiding coke and started to make myself drink bubbly water instead. Today I discovered I no longer like the diet cokes I hoarded earlier this year. Not only was it my only pleasure in life besides the other things I can't remember right now because am upset, but now I also have more coke than I need.

I have so much garbage this week that it won't fit in the bin. I have to drive some all the way across town to put it in my parents' bin, since they are out on vacation this week. Otherwise I'd have to stack up the non-stinky garbage on the side of the house like a fucking refugee.

Oh, and I also have to wash the dog this weekend. The ENTIRE pug, not just the butt side.

I had to work three of my days off this week, making something like $500 extra pay, which would be more but my regular schedule for this payroll week is only 24 hours (Saturday and Sunday), so the first two days extra I worked were at straight time, not 1.5 times straight time as overtime pay normally is.

On the other hand, it is extra money, so I have that going for me.

__________________Sleep - the most beautiful experience in life - except drink.--W.C. Fields

I used scissors in a fit of hangry to open a costco-sized bag of snap pea crisps that has a resealable zip opening on the front. Now I have to eat them all. Oh wait, I was going to do that in the next 24-48 hours anyway.