Wednesday, December 19, 2012

“We can’t tolerate this anymore. These tragedies must end.
And to end them, we must change.” – President Barak Obama, 12/16/12

No matter your political, racial, or religious beliefs I don’t think there’s an
American out there who doesn’t agree with this statement with all their heart.
After the hate fueled tragedies and horrific violence that has plagued this
nation for the last decade, no ration...al person can argue that change needs
to happen and it needs to happen now. As a people, we can no longer allow
ourselves to foster a society where the mindless deaths of others is the only
outlet for the rage of our broken, and the infamy of mass destruction the only
recourse for our unrecognized.

As I write this, twenty-eight families bury their hopes for the future
alongside the shattered bodies of their children, wives, and mothers in Newtown
Connecticut. The country is heartbroken, outraged, horrified, and confounded by
a tragedy of such epic scope. We must do something to prevent such insanity
from happening ever again. On that we all agree. The problem we face is in the
“how” of the thing. How do we prevent the insane from attacking the innocent?
How do we recognize, and treat, the mentally ill so they never approach this
level of madness? How do we ensure that all innocent lives are protected so
they have a chance to develop to their fullest potential? How do we keep tools
of destruction from the hands of people who want to kill?

How do you stop hate?

Perhaps the answer lies in the question itself. All around me, I hear people
discussing the need for change and each of us has our own answers:

We need tighter gun control . . . No, no, that’s ridiculous; we need more guns
so everyone is armed to prevent these tragedies.

We need to bring prayer back to schools so children learn about God . . .
Absolutely not! We need to stop allowing religions to brainwash our children to
hate anyone who doesn’t believe what they do.
Outlaw homosexuality: it leads to immorality . . . Tolerance toward others is
the way to fight hate like this, you moron!

It’s all just a power grab by the leftist media who use tragedies like this to
scare us into line . . . Are you a complete idiot? Anyone can see it’s the
Republican nut-jobs catering to their NRA cronies who cause this stuff!

You allow doctors to murder babies, why are you surprised when someone else
does it, baby-killer . . . Fascist morons like you, who want to control even
what people can do with their own bodies are the ones who cause this crap!

Are you seeing the problem? We can’t stop the hatred because all our answers
are based in hate. We have allowed ourselves to become a nation of single issue
orientation. Each of us focuses on our own set of political, racial, sexual,
religious and moral views to the exclusion of all other ideas. Our personal
beliefs are inherently right, so everyone else is –by definition- wrong. That
is the true root of hate: the belief that other views, and the people who hold
them, are inferior. We stand and shake our fists in the air, wildly declaiming
the absolute righteousness of our views and proudly stating our willingness to
die, even to kill, to defend those views and we sit in bafflement when our
children act upon the lessons of hate that we so carefully taught them. Do we
need to change our nation? Do you truly believe that? If you do, then I suggest
you start by looking closely in a mirror.

We have developed a culture of acceptable rage and institutionalized hatred in
modern America. From the highest elected officials in the land, down through
our religious and civic leaders, right to the guy picking up your trash. In
America, it’s not only alright to hate the people who disagree with you, it’s
strongly encouraged. If you don’t believe that, all you need do is turn on your
television. Our elected representatives scream lies and vitriol about their
counterparts across the aisle, with no pretense of logic or respect, and we
deem it “political process.” We follow those tirades up with countless hours of
punditry, where supporters from both sides decry the idiocy, corruptness, and
inherent vileness of those who disagree with them and we call it “news.”
Preachers stand upon their pulpit and call for their followers to
disenfranchise, devalue, and despise those who don’t share their beliefs and we
call it “religion.” Neighbors rail about the people moving onto the block who
lower property values because they have darker skin, or wear funny towels on
their heads, and we call this “freedom of speech.” We teach our children to
hate and want to crush their opponents on ball fields and we call it
“competition.” If you’re Pro-Life, it’s acceptable to spit on pregnant
teenagers and call them murderer. If you’re Pro-Choice, it’s alright to call
anyone who opposes abortion an inbred moron. Jews can hate Arabs, who can hate
Christians, who can hate Gays, who can hate Republicans, who can hate
Democrats, and on and on in an endless cycle.

Hate, rage, and violence grow all around us because we embrace it in our daily
lives. We nourish it at our breast and share it with our children, expounding
on its virtues and demanding they support it in turn or suffer –-at best-- our
derision. At worst, children who fail to take up their parents sacred hatreds
are outcast, shunned, and hated in turn by their own. Hate exists all around us
in the small things we do in our daily lives. When we flip the bird at the guy
driving too slow in the fast lane, or when watch those sad families on reality
TV so we can mock them and feel better about ourselves. Hate is there when we
grouse about the lazy bastards on welfare, and in the scowl on our face when we
see that Hispanic guy holding hands with that pretty white girl. It’s what
we’re teaching our children when we tell them not to play with that kid who has
too many syllables in his name and when we call the athlete who drops the ball
on the TV a: “worthless piece of crap!” We bathe ourselves, and our families, in
hatred and see our attitudes as strong willed and independent representations
of the American Spirit.

We need to stop.

When I was a child, my father had a favorite quote from Voltaire: “I do not
agree with what you have to say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say
it.” That has always seemed the American ideal to me. I always saw it as a
defense for freedom of speech but now I begin to see it as a guide sign on the
road out of this confusing jungle of anger and violence we’re struggling through.
It is alright to disagree with others, even argue with them vehemently if your
beliefs are strong enough. It is not alright to hate them for disagreeing with
you. It is not acceptable to belittle, berate, and mock those who hold a
differing viewpoint. As Americans, we are supposed to support the beliefs of
others, even when they disagree with our own. We were built as a nation of
people, first and foremost. An assembly of individuals who pledged to each
other: “. . . our lives, our fortunes, and our Sacred Honor.” We must first
hold to the belief that we are one people, one nation, one culture made up of
many parts and that each part must be held in respect by all others.

We can argue about the myriad laws that need to be passed and the cultural
morals that need to be revisited, and on and on, in order to prevent tragedies
like Newtown, Columbine, and Colorado but no legislation will have an effect if
we don’t change our underlying thought processes as a nation. We can’t change
as a nation until we change within our local communities, we can’t change a
community until we change the families that make it up, and the only way to
change your family is by changing yourself. Practice tolerance, not necessarily
of other people’s views, but always show tolerance toward other people. When
someone says something you oppose, tell your child you disagree and tell them
why. Don’t call them a brain-dead moron who is ruining our country and will
burn in hell for their stupidity. Try looking for the positive side of opposing
viewpoints; understand that most people are trying to accomplish good things
even if you think they’re wrong in their approach. Do you oppose gay marriage?
That’s fine, but you need to realize that the people who support it aren’t
immoral fiends out to destroy our nation; they’re just people who think
everyone has the right to be with the one they love. Are Pro-Life? That’s ok
too, but you need to realize the people protesting abortions aren’t religious
freaks trying to impose their morals on others; they’re people who are trying
to save what they see as innocent lives.

I’m not trying to discuss what’s wrong or what’s right, we all get to decide
that for ourselves. What I’m saying is that as long as we wallow in the
cultural cesspool of hate and intolerance that we’ve built around ourselves, we
can never have the change we so desperately need. We need to step out of that
pool ourselves, then turn and offer a hand up to the folks still behind us. If,
as a nation, we can support debate without anger, we can make progress. If we
can tolerate difference without derision, we have a chance. If we can turn from
our fascination with the tawdry, the infamous, and the deification of
vehemence, then maybe we can eliminate these tragedies all together.

That, my dear countrymen, is something worth fighting for. If you can support
these simple ideas, please pass this along to others. Together, we can change
the world . . . that is what I believe.