Please do not be too proud to ask for help. Some of us are happy to help others learn how to live sober. Most of us did not know what to do to combat the urge or desire for a drink. And some self-help programs teach us "tools" to living, such as living "one day at a time."

AA helped me attain over 32 years of continuous sobriety, and I have never regretted the help they GIVE me, as I still attend on a regular basis. (Tonight is my home group meeting night.)

My comment about being "too proud" to ask for help is not meant to be a critical comment. It is just an indication that "pride" stands in our way for help in many situations. I usually wanted solutions to problems that were "my own ideas" so I could be proud of myself for the ability to solve the problem. One problem I had was recognizing how angry a person I was. I thought I did not have anger because I did not get in fights. I would describe anger in terms that did not include me, because I was "better" than that or "different" in some way. I found (with other people's help) that they described anger in different ways, and that I indeed was a very angry person, filled with all sorts of "right and wrong" thoughts and attitudes. I had "judgements" on all sorts of situations and events.

The point is that unless one works with someone closely (perhaps a sponsor), they may not get the "feedback" which helps in a solution to a drinking problem. In attempting to describe why I drank, I might answer that it made me "feel better" in certain situations. A question became "feel better from what?". Most of the things were tenseness over how other people did things or treated me, all "judgements" and anger.

By attending AA meetings, I found others with similar situations who would share how they had overcome their problems. They were willing to share their experiences with me, and I could try that approach if I wished. It became a situation of their solutions were working and mine were not. I tried some of their ideas and they worked, and I am happy.

I have not read many of the posts in this thread as I only recently found this one, so I don't mean to offend anyone intentionally.