I don't want to be that guy

i feel like I'm being that super-insecure guy, there are a few VGL guys and i really think one is cute, and being its not a hugely known "gay " gym I'm very hesitant to ask him out Im not sure how to lead the conversation with out making it awkward.

In this day and age, I would say that if you don't recognize him on okcupid, Grindr or Scruff he's probably not gay (or at least not gay and single). You can always make friendly conversation nonetheless.

Yes, don't assume anything, but just because he's not active on a gay app doesn't mean shit (I don't have a gay app). Set your feelings aside and make a new friend. If he doesn't want to be friends that's his loss. You're a handsome guy, gymguy81. I wish I was your crush! Just saying! Good luck!

gymguy81 saidi feel like I'm being that super-insecure guy, there are a few VGL guys and i really think one is cute, and being its not a hugely known "gay " gym I'm very hesitant to ask him out Im not sure how to lead the conversation with out making it awkward.

Being insecure is not something to to be ashamed about! when you face the unknown, and God knows meetingsomeone new, always makes even the most confident of us insecure on how things will turn out! so my friend don't be fooled by those who played you into the confident and sure of himself personality/date. I perceive a person's insecurity as a good sign, and a great challenge to explore more about their feelings and mine. Insecure people are basically just too anxious and excited for been accepted as they are, and that is ok, and fits just fine with me! besides I love a date or an acquaintance when they show their vulnerabilities vs those who hide it by pretending to be something they are not!

One good word of advice thou; stay away from anyone who criticize you for being insecure, as it was a bad thing!? because if he was wise and well intended, instead of finding faults in it will try to understand where your insecurities comefrom!

Sometimes an insecure person all they need to build upconfidence is finding someone who understands, that like aplant some of us need a lot of light while others can growjust as good and high up the tree top in its shadows!

Start out with a little friendly conversation. It doesn't have to be that hard. The worst thing he could do is say no. Maybe ask him what he does differently at the gym in terms of lifting weights then what you've been doing. And if you feel like things are going good, then ask him out for a cup of coffee.