Absolut Blogshit is made of a unique blend of natural bullshit flavors and sarcasm distilled from individuals grown in the rich fields of different countries. The distilling and flavoring of the bullshitting art is an age old tradition. However, pure bullshit has only been expressed through Absolut Blogshit since 2006.

Friday, February 10, 2006

A tribute to men!

As you might have noticed there are only men specially invited to this blog, and apart from Angie and me, there are only male postings/comments on this blog. As for the fact with the high proportion of Indians on this blog, the high proportion of men on this blog needs analysis. First of all let me state, that God please let the ration men:women stay as it is on this blog!! Girls, if you are offended, I once again refer to the disclaimer to the right on this page.

So, we need to analyse, 1) why are so many bullshitters being men, 2) why do Angie and I have so many male friends (who suitably also are good bullshitters hence belong to this blog)?

1) Why are so many bullshitters men?One of the reasons I believe in is that bullshit is a way to not get to the core of your inner self, you build up a shell of bullshit. As we know, girls are very keen on analysing everything and dig so deep into themselves so they almost pop out on the other side of their body. Whereas men might not be so strong in this analytical skill, and do not want to get in touch with their inner self all the time. Hence, you bullshit (thank God!).

Im sure there are many more reasons, but maybe you men would like to enlighten us about them.

2) Why do Angie and Hanna have such a strong male network?Hmm... one can either think that they (i.e. we, i.e. Angie and Hanna) are pojkflickor (for those of you who dont speak Swedish, that means boy-girls). Are we? Hmm... well I did like to climb trees when I was a kid, but equally much time I spent with dolls. So I dont think this is the reason. I just think that men (most, most, most of the time) are so much more fun! And hence my strong boy-network.

As we all know girls just analyse too much. "Why did he say hi and not hallo? Does that mean that he likes me, or that he doesnt want to have a relationship right now, or that he's totally not interested?" Beats me! Girls complicate things too much.

Girls also have this habit of doing everything in pairs (the going to the bathroom in pairs have been discussed to boredom already so I leave that). Why? Okey, it's fun to have company. But sometimes I, me, myself and I, are just much more fun than other people so why be with more people than with myself?

Dont get me wrong. I want to continue being a girl; I want to fall for men, I want to wear skirts, and I want to carry a baby. But I do like spending time with guys! So boys/men please stay as you are;1) Dont start analysing. Anyways what we girls say wont make too much sense. And I swear it has no specific meaning if I said hi or hallo when you called.2) Continue being helpless once in a while, we enjoy taking care of you. And girls enjoy feeling needed. Important to add is also that it is very much easier to take care of a guy than of a girl. We girls know exactly which buttons to press and where to touch to make you happy and satisfied, whereas you guys have a lot to learn in that area. (If you are prude you should be blushing now, because Im referring to exactly what you all are thinking off).3) Dont become mushy. If anyone would ever buy me a teddybear with the text "I love you", I would probably puke! Being emotional is nice, but dont be mushy! And once again, dont get me wrong. Im not cold-hearted, I have loved so much so I could have written "I love you" all over King Kong! But I dont need a teddybear to tell a guy how I feel about him.

So well I think this was my 5-cents contribution to why men are bullshitters and to why we like men, and to why we want you to stay as you are!

1 Comments:

On all these years of very girlish (over)analysis i have also realized that guys in general are much more uncomplicated, chilled, practical, fun, straightforward and easygoing than girls.. and to me, thats reason enough to like them! (well, that and other thing which probably deserves a post for itself.. but lets leave it at that)

I believe that when guys are born, they are provided with the latest copy of the official "Bullshit Manual", basically just to shape their style from an early age, cause im sure the skill comes quite naturally to all (most) of them.

Anyways, i think after this exhaustive analysis your doubts about us being pojflickor have been 100% cleared and you get an idea of what we mean when we say guys are so much more uncomplicated!