Protecting kids in wild west of cyberspace Bedroom computers ‘like having a loaded gun’

Educating children on how to keep themselves safe in the “Wild West” of cyberspace has to start as soon as they access the Internet, according to a Mission expert on high-risk youth activities online.

“We have to educate every child when they’re in grade three, four, five. We can give them a clear message about what’s safe online,” said Merlyn Horton, the executive director of the non-profit educating agency SOLOS, or Safe Online Outreach Society.

When she speaks to young people, she stresses that everything they post online is permanent and is public.

“I tell them not to send anything they wouldn’t want their parents or family to see,” she said.

It’s important to give kids information before they venture online because if they make a mistake, such as sending out an inappropriate photo of themselves or sharing personal information, it’s pretty much impossible to retrieve, she said.

Children as young as 11 are sending sexual images of themselves through the Internet, to make or to impress friends. The average age of children used in online pornographic images is 11, adds Horton.

And she notes that the cyber-bullying of Amanda Todd, the 15-year-old Port Coquitlam teen who took her life last week, began when she shared a sexual image of herself when she was in Grade 7, about 12 years old.

Just as parents should be involved and informed about their adolescents’ activities at school and with their friends, parents should know what their kids are doing on the Web.

Technology and social media is changing so rapidly, “it’s like the Wild West out there,” said Horton, but too often we let our children roam in that unruly environment without any guidance.

For example, ‘sexting’ – sending sexualized photos and comments with smart phones – wasn’t even around five or six years ago, she said.

But with the universal accessibility to cyberspace through laptops and smart-phones, it’s a new phenomenon that parents and adults find impossible to control. Last week, Horton spoke about social media and safety to a class of Grade 4-6 students at a Mission elementary school.

“Forty per cent of those kids had a Face-book profile, and that’s in violation of Face-book’s own guidelines – they require people to be at least 13 to have an online profile,” she said.

The best protection is education, says Horton, and there are resources such as MediaSmarts for teachers and parents.

She advises parents to keep the lines of communications open with their kids at the dining room table, as well on the Internet.

If their child has a Facebook page at age 11 or 12 or 13, parents should be their ‘friends’ online because when the kids get older, they won’t want to allow it, she said.

Follow basic rules, Horton said. Don’t let youngsters have a computer, laptop or even a smart phone in their bedrooms: “it’s like having a loaded gun in the kid’s room.”

Talk about online dangers. As tragic as Todd’s death is, it is also an opportunity for parents to talk frankly with their kids about privacy, bullies and predators online.