Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The Complexity of it All

Adult children are kinda complex. Some of my kids seem to gravitate to overly complex situations and thus I am somehow connected to them as well.

We are realizing that Kyle's wedding is just 2 months from yesterday, and while his situation isn't all that complex, getting everyone there will be. If people want to invite their significant others we don't have enough space, so we may have to rent a vehicle -- but people will be various places needing to be picked up. Attempting to juggle it all is going to be quite crazy.

Another one of our adult sons currently isn't dating, but we are still someone connected to his girlfriend and that whole thing is complex.

John isn't living her much any more -- usually at gf's house helping her through the pregnancy and working full time -- but he has many things he wants my advice about and when he doesn't like the facts, he blames them on me. Because some how I'm the reason that if you have a license you need insurance, and other such things about life which are completely my responsibility.

Salinda's bf's car broke down and she is trying to get back and forth from here to there, but never quite sure when or how. She has appointments and Sadie's 8th grade graduation Friday night and bf's sisters HS graduation Saturday, and it's all so complex but when I try to get advance planning I can't, so I know I'll end up wtih requests all over the place that I can't satisfy.

And sometimes it all just kinda crashes in at the same time when suddenly emails and texts are coming in and people are asking to talk to me, and calling, and all kinds of stuff. But if I can self-differentiate and control my own anxiety, things usually go fairly well.

3 comments:

How does your son figure that it's your fault that he needs car insurance? It's the law. Did he think he was going to drive without insurance but you insisted that he abide by the law? Or maybe you're just the messenger who brought the bad news?It seems like he's operating at a very immature moral level where parents are all-powerful and the only reason rules are obeyed is to escape punishment and not because it's the right thing to do. Ick. I feel bad for you.

Sometimes my sense of humor doesn't translate well. I was being sarcastic about them thinking it's my fault. They just get angry and defensive when the reality of life is presented to them and sometimes take it out me as the parent. I think lots of kids do that to their parents.