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This section was my workspace for philosophy essays between July 2006 and April 2008.
I call this "Prehistoric Kilroy" because it gave me practice for more
disciplined essays in Kilroy Cafe.Also see my philophical blog and Twitter feed.

Issue #31, 11/24/2006

A Fork in the Road

By Glenn CampbellFamily Court Philosopher

Life is a series of forks in the road. At each junction,
you have to take one path or the other, and the whole rest
of your life can be permanently altered by this choice.

Should you go to college or join the Army? Should you buy a
new car or a used one? Should you get married or continue
living in sin?

We face way more of these life-changing decisions than we
are aware of, because most of our choices are made by
default. We had the power to change our life yesterday, but
we didn't do it; instead, we did pretty much the same things
that we did the day before and the day before that.
Yesterday, we passed many opportunities for choice, but by
force of habit we took the most worn path.

Nonetheless, there are times when the fork in the road is
obvious, and we are forced to choose. Graduation from high
school is one such decision point. Your previous road is
ending, and like it or not, you have to choose a new one.
When you are looking for a job and receive two job offers,
you also have to pick a path. Will you go to Dallas or Des
Moines? It is clear at such times that the whole arc of your
life is going to hinge on the decision you make now.

All forks in the road have certain common characteristics and
generate certain psychological effects. When you reach one,
you face a genuine dilemma: Should you go left or right?
Unfortunately, your knowledge of each path is limited. You
see the start of each path, but that's all you really know.

You may also see big billboards put up by people who
have already taken one path or the other and are trying to
promote it. If the choice is Army vs. College, then the
Army folks have their own advertizing campaign and the
college people have theirs. The trouble with this
information is that it is usually skewed by the economic and
emotional needs of the advertizer. For example, if someone
has already joined the Army, then to justify the wisdom of
his own choice, he is going to try to sell it to you. If he
can convince you to join his club, then it relieves some of
his private doubt about his own decision.

The fact is, you can only fully understand where a path will
lead by actually taking it yourself. At that point,
unfortunately, you are at least to some extent committed to
it. The only thing more difficult than choosing a
life-changing path is TURNING BACK after you have
chosen it.

Once you start down a path, you tend to become more and more
emotionally committed to it, even if it doesn't lead you
where you expected it would. You have made an
investment in the path, and investments usually
create psychological pressure to actively believe in the
choice and suppress dissent. You start wearing blinders and
spouting patriotic slogans about how much you love your
path. "What the best road in the world? LEFT! I'm proud to
be a Leftie!"

What is really driving your boosterism, however, is the fact
that you have already invested in this path and turning back
would be just too painful. If you have already spent a lot
of your personal resources on a certain objective or way of
life, then you are probably going to believe religiously in
it, even if it leads you into a swamp.

This is one of the basic dilemmas of decision making. You
make a choice based on naive information, but by the
time you can see the whole picture, you are already
committed to your choice and have difficulty turning back.

Marriages and other romantic relationships offer plenty of
examples. You start them with an idealized (and often
delusional) notion of who the other person is and what the
relationship will become. At the first fork in the road,
you chose your partner based mostly on their billboards and
your own distorted evaluation of them. Only by travelling
down the road a certain distance do you find out who and
what you really have.

That's when things get complicated. When a road doesn't give
you what you expected, do you turn back or soldier on? The
natural human inclination is to march ahead, killing off any
messengers who question your choice.

Imagine that you are heading down a real dirt road in a
covered wagon—say, en route to the land of milk and
honey in California. Round about Las Vegas (a green little
oasis), you decide to take a right-hand turn, based on a map
that says this is a shortcut. At the fork in the road,
you made a naive decision—go right—based on
sketchy information—the map.

The going isn't easy. You end up making your own road, and
every mile presents enormous obstacles. The elevation drops
and the desert gets hotter and hotter. Your food and water
are running low, and you aren't really sure where you are.

"When are we going to get there?" whine the kids.

"It won't be long," you lie.

So now you face the dilemma. Your supplies are running low.
You don't know what's ahead. The path you chose wasn't what
you thought it was, but you have already made a huge
investment in it. What do you do?

We can't answer that question without being there. If, for
example, your marriage isn't what you expected it to be, do
you abandon it, or do you try to adapt? There is no easy
answer.

One factor you should not consider, however, is the
magnitude of your past investment. If you have gone through
a lot of pain to get here, that doesn't alter the conditions
as they now exist. The decision to continue or turn back
hinges entirely on considerations of the future, not the
past.

If you find yourself in Death Valley, the only important
thing is coming out alive, not defending your past decision.

Every fork in the road is potentially dangerous and
potentially rewarding, but always we have insufficient
information to make a truly informed choice. Therefore, it
is usually best to approach each path tentatively, with full
knowledge that it is subject to change. All the patriotism
and boosterism is distracting and possibly destructive,
because it locks you into your choice. You shouldn't delude
yourself into thinking that this is the best path for forever;
it only has to be the best path for now.

Ideally, you should set things up so you make one decision
now but a little bit further down the road, you are free to
make another, perhaps to correct any mistakes you made in
this one or adjust your trajectory.

The best approach in an uncertain world is to
develop lots of opportunities for
choice, while the natural human inclination is the opposite:
to make future
choice go away. (See Freedom... Burning
a hole in your pocket.) The world may demand that you
choose a path and make some kind of commitment to your
choice, but at least you can press for the shortest term possible.
It is usually better to renew a contract every year than
to commit yourself to 20 years right off the bat.

Sometimes, forks in the road are a crapshoot. Your
information is so limited that you can only flip a coin and
go with whatever comes up. This isn't necessarily a bad
thing, as long as you have left yourself the freedom to
change. If you find yourself in the middle of a strange
city without any guidebooks, maybe the best strategy is just
to head out in some direction—any direction—and
see what you find. Even if your initial path isn't the best
one, it is still going to be educational and will help you
recognize a better path when you find it.

Forks in the road can also be deceptive. You may think
there are only two choices available to you when in fact
there are many more. When the question is Coke vs. Pepsi,
both of these paths have huge advertizing budgets and big
billboards, and this artificial rivalry
may sucker you into thinking that Coke and Pepsi are the only
options available. In fact, a glass of ice water might do
the job much better, with virtually no cost or commitment.

The highest artistry in decision-making lies in finding
these clever, unadvertised paths. If you are facing two
intimidating choices, then you should always be on the
lookout for a third, hidden behind the bushes.

Maybe you don't have to choose Coke or Pepsi, Army or
college, marriage or celibacy. Maybe there is something
much more productive and fulfilling than any of these
prepackaged alternatives. You just have to have the
creativity and courage to see it.

—G.C.

Reader Comments

“Very Practical and easy to understand for real life application”
—CD 6/6/07 (rating=5)