Have a listen to some of HAZMAT's favorite HALLOWEEN songs that are sure to rock & roll you to an early grave! However, you will find with some of these songs, you don't require screaming guitars and thunderous drums to summon the spirit of Satan. So when you take a sip off of these ghetto ghostly tracks poured str8 from the 40 bottle you better pray that tha devil don't catch you slippin'! One thing is for sure. If none of these songs raise the hair on the back of your neck ...you're already dead!!!

Check out these blood curdling snapshots the HAZMAN caught on a recon mission last night. It appears Atlanta thrash pallbearers SADISTIC RITUAL, among other filthy cohorts, were spotted devouring the set during a hard hitting house show! The HAZMAN was lucky to have made it out alive. Enjoy.

Check out the new EP by Atlanta’s SADISTIC RITUAL. It’s like running your ears through a wood chipper. Oil up that rusty chainsaw and march your way to the EARL to see em live tonight alongside other hellish acts ANCESTOR, KOROIDIA and the mighty SOLSTICE! Doors open @ 8:30 SHARP!!!

I watched a couple heavy hitting trucker movies recently and felt I ought to write about the experience.

Rolling Vengeance - 1987

In a rural farm town a group of local drunken rednecks terrorize the streets. The judicial system has turned a blind eye to the reckless and deadly behavior. American trucker Little Joey, son of trucker Big Joey has had enough. After losing nearly all that he cares about in life, he decides to take matters into his own hands by building an armored, fire-spitting monster truck with a giant drill/auger on the front. Fueled by rage to seek revenge for his loved ones, he rampages through town crushing and rolling through all who have done him wrong. Scenes from this movie that are noteworthy: Ned Beatty throws a mash potato tantrum;a good montage of chains, sparks and welding torches when Little Joey, while in a productive rage, pieces together salvaged parts from his scrapyard to build his monstrous rig; tons of monster truck crushing action. This movie is highly entertaining and is definitely worth the watch for all you monster truck fanatics. It's not justice, it's rolling vengeance!A little side trivia: The Monster﻿ Truck in this movie was constructed by professional Monster Truck driver Mike Welch from Bellingham, WA.

Trailer

Thunder Run - 1986

On the desert highways and backroads of Nevada a group of middle-aged terrorists have been hijacking shipments of government plutonium. So instead of using the military to combat these mischievous highway marauders the government employs Charlie to deliver the goods. Charlie is your average, friendly, down-on-his-luck grandfather and Korean war veteran. Although Charlie may be old, he still has a few tricks up his sleeves --which he proves by arming his 18-wheeler with flame throwers, a heavy duty cattle guard and a few other weapons to make sure he gets the job done right. To make it more touching, his rebellious grandson Chris has snuck along for the ride. Once on the road, the duo meet the onslaught of the terrorists wielding shotguns on motorcycles and VW bugs armed with missile launchers. Other cool scenes in the movie are when Charlie drives his truck & trailer off of a jump and flies airborne over a stalled train. At one point in the movie, as the team passes through a secret tunnel, Charlie uses a high tech CB Radio integrated with special crystals to somehow disarm the random cartoon laser beams shooting at them in all directions. In yet another random scene taking place inside a bar, a country band is covering “Cotton Eyed Joe." The band then rallies all of the patrons into a sing-a-long repeatedly shouting “bull shit!” This goes on monotonously for about 30 seconds. Something I also found perplexing was despite the amount of killing and violence, the movie manages to somehow maintain the innocence of a family comedy. Charlie and his rather naive friends never seem to grasp that their lives are at stake. Such as every time someone falls victim to one of Charlies booby traps (usually resulting in being burned to death) the main characters just seem to react with a goofy expression as if they had pranked someone with a whoopee cushion. In another scene Grandpa Charlie demands a piece of warm apple pie from his wife but forgets to mention that he has just agreed to drive a semi-truck carrying plutonium that is going to be under attack from heavily armed, murderous terrorists! It is as if he is just making a run to the grocery store and back. Maybe this lack of emotion was more of a lack of caring by the cast who really didn’t give a damn about the movie aside from making a few extra bucks. This a good movie to put on for your pets when you leave the house to run errands.

Trailer

PROVE YOURSELF. Ta﻿ke the quiz. Or suffer the consequences.

Ye posers beware! Turn back now while you still can. Answer the questions below and submit your answers to the form at the end of the quiz. Each correct answer is worth 1 point. The person with the MOST points will not only be able to say that they are not a POSER but will also win FREE merchandise from HAZMART. Hurry! The contest ends at midnight on Thursday. Good luck!

Answer in the form of a question.

1. Lets start out with a nice warm up. All this man wanted was a pepsi.

7. You are standing high atop a frozen mountain peak at a Scandinavian Black Metal recital. Amongst the crowd a number of metalheads with corpse face paint are standing in a torchlit circle with a pentagram in the middle. They are evenly spaced and the 7th metalhead is directly opposite the 18th metalhead. How many metalheads are in the circle?

Traveling with KING DIAMOND

8. King Diamond is driving 50 mph in a horse drawn carriage under a full moon through a fog covered haunted backroad en route to his next concert. His destination is 125 miles away and the band takes the stage at exactly midnight. The time is 9:30 PM. How long will it take him to arrive at the concert. Will he make it in time?

TRIP AT THE BRAIN TEASERS BONUS QUESTIONS: 2 POINTS EACH!

A. The HAZMAN wanted to get into the VIP section of a JUDAS PRIEST concert. So he hid behind some large MARSHALL amplifiers and watched the guard at the door of the backstage. The guard said a number to each person as they approached, and the member would respond with a number of their own. If the member responded with the correct number they were let in. If they responded incorrectly they were thrown out and called a POSER. One member came up to the door, the guard said twelve, and the member responded with six and was let in. Another member came to the door, the guard said six and the member responded with three and was let in. Believing he had heard enough, the HAZMAN went up to the guard. The guard said ten, and the HAZMAN said five, but was denied access, verbally demoralized and called a POSER. What should the HAZMAN have said?

B. A broke ass heavy metal vinyl collector had spent all of his paychecks on many rare and precious vinyl records. He did not want anybody to know about them. One day, his wife said, "It is time to throw all of that garbage away. How many of those damn vinyls do you have?" After pausing he cleverly replied, "Well! If I divide the vinyl albums into two unequal numbers, then 32 times the difference between the two numbers equals the difference between the squares of the two numbers. Figure that shit out and I will allow thee to dispose of my grand vinyl collection."

Help the merchant's wife by finding out how many vinyl albums her husband owns?