"Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life." This Scripture, 1 Thessalonians 4:11 caused me to sit back and simply mouth "wow".

In many ways it goes against every thing in which I was raised, both family and church.

After many years of striving and pushing myself, I still find it extremely difficult to sit and read or watch a movie. My mind tells me to keep striving. if I'm not moving I'm not achieving. Crazy, I know!

Don't misunderstand me. To set goals and to encourage our children and ourselves to aim high is good. But while some people achieve huge success and beyond, most of us have to find contentment in a mediocre life.

One of the problems is that we're conditioned in this world to believe that we are only important if we've achieved great success. The growing career, the great looking spouse, the right clothes, appropriate children, the right connections so we can keep climbing the ladder of success. And yet we've got it backwards.

God used a woman named Sarah who was a step from the grave, to birth a child, the first of a great nation.

God chose Moses, a murderer, hiding out in fear for his life, to lead a nation away from slavery.

This Scripture today has helped me to redefine some of my thinking. We strive and strive for greater success to not just find security and contentment but to decrease our feelings of anonymity.

And yet God chooses the least likely person to win.

There's an important reason for this Scripture to be in the Bible. In our mediocre, and boring lives God IS using us.

I'm loving this extra hour of rest this morning before I drag out of bed and get ready for church. Extra time to sit, play with the dogs and read and write. And I must admit, eating three donuts brought to me by my husband.

Part of my study this morning has been to study God and His will.

We wonder why God seems to do nothing about certain problems and so we question His power and care for us. We believe that if a problem, for example a marriage, a person or financial difficulty would disappear, then life would be better. This form of thinking though shows shortsightedness and even arrogance. That we believe our plan to be best.

Honestly we often don't agree with how God does the job and that He should work according to our wants and desires.

Sometimes we even lower our standards to find freedom if God does not perform within our time frame. For example, thoughts such as "I deserve to be happy" lead us often to do things that are contrary to God's plan.

Patience is difficult. Living in the tension of unresolved issues is hard.

God's ultimate quest though is to make us holy and close to Him and no amount of shifting or short cuts on our behalf will alter this or bring us the result that we believe that we deserve.

We've heard the statement, "Even when our world is falling apart, God is still working in all areas."

Easily said but not easily lived. And very hard to hear when life is in turmoil.

The hand and will of God though is often not pleasant. It is not the stuff of our dreams.

It may even mean that we have to stagger through a storm alone, accused and ashamed.

God's will is rarely a life of success and no adversity. Consider Isaiah 53:10 in regards to Jesus.

We also cannot deny the pain of Joseph's life. At 17, he was betrayed by his brothers, sold into slavery and separated from family for twenty years. And yet would we say that he was out of God's will? And that God had removed Himself from Joseph's life?

God will accomplish His purpose and His will despite the messiness of life.

It actually takes trials and pain to make us useful to God. In fact it's doubtful that anyone is truly useful to God without very deep pain.

There is no guaranteed way through which we can receive God's blessings. There are principles that guide us through life but there is no such thing as a cause and effect pattern that will guarantee blessing.

We can work hard at raising great children or building a great marriage. We can work diligently at a business or making lasting friendships. Ultimately though, we do not have that much control over the outcome and may not achieve our desired result.

Christian leaders can work hard and serve God faithfully. Some enjoy God's blessing by building a substantial ministry but others do not.

Some parents parent faithfully and produce fantastic children but other parents whom have been just as faithful, do not.

Ultimately if we live with a cause and effect mindset regarding the blessing of God, life becomes a roller coaster and disappointing.

If children, marriage, business or friendships succeed, we are happy. If one fails, though, we experience contempt not just for self but for others.

If we live with a cause and effect mentality, or as one whom expects blessing for good works, life and God are disappointing. We live, preoccupied with using God as a source of reward, rather than aiming at a relationship with Him.

Beyond the splendor that life has to offer, focusing on the thought that God Himself is the ultimate blessing is fulfilling. He is the constant relationship that lifts us despite trials and loves and accepts us in spite of success or failure.

One of my greatest discoveries recently is understanding that my source of affirmation has shifted.

Our desire to be valued is great and one of the ways in which this is maintained is through affirmation.

Our need for affirmation is greater when we feel that we have failed.

We can though make the mistake of trying to get affirmation from a source that is not appropriate. That source may not have the capacity, the capability, the time or understanding.

Rather than attempting to repeatedly draw affirmation from that from which there is no result, we should look around and realize that God's provision will come from elsewhere.

New seasons bring new meaning and new people into our lives. We cannot change the season or other people. We should not depend upon our own understanding but know that our troubles are all a part of God's master plan.

We grow up in church and the recommendations are to pray, read your Bible, attend regularly, get involved and to share our faith with others.

We usually struggle and feel guilty regarding our lack of competence in at least one of these areas. And therefore think of ourselves as being a little less than others. We carry a sense of failing God too.

But then great catastrophe can strike us such as relationship or financial disaster. In so many ways we no longer measure up to our former image.

And so we have to start again. It's actually a journey of rediscovery regarding one self. Who is God and what does He desire of me. I'm no longer what I was

The result is that God loved me as I was and loves me even now. I don't have to behave or perform in any certain way.

Hardship is a prime opportunity to move beyond immature ideas into greater faith and character. Some disasters, are a catalyst for learning perseverance, steadiness and hope.

Who among us wouldn't prefer an easier life but through hardship we discover the reality of God.

God assigns us a life to lead and as much as we'd like it to be a journey of plenty and fairness, this is not always so.

Nevertheless, there is something splendid about embracing our journey and finding new strengths and contentment along the way.

To compare our path to that of another is a useless task and only brings grief.

Each of us must make every effort to accept our own God given calling. This therefore lessens the hurt along the way in difficult circumstances.

Whether experiencing loss in career, relationships, a church home or in sickness, if we search for that new pearl of wisdom that God is endeavoring to show us, we can accept His journey without losing hope for a better future.

I am a melancholy personality. I enjoy the thought of sleeping in or going for a walk with my dogs in the sunshine. I love the thought of curling up by the fire and reading a good book with a lit candle alongside me.

I can be intense as many know. I try to find the reason for the occurrence of things and love having a goal. When life changes drastically, it's difficult to find joy. My sense of justice is upset and emotions rage.

Joy though doesn't have to be put on hold until circumstances change. It can be found in the simplest of things.

It can be having coffee with an understanding friend who doesn't have to deflect the conversation to discuss "the bright side of things." It's taking up an old hobby that was not possible in former times. It's rearranging a room and giving it a fresh look and this does not have to cost money. It's sitting in a coffee shop and while you may be alone, you can be surrounded by the chatter of others. Perhaps joy is watching the sun go down, listening to the wildlife.

Life can be tough and many of us would confess that we are not fans of what we face. We still though need joy.

We need to remember that God is bigger and that life is not just about us.

There is beauty around us at all times and we can be thankful even when things are painful.

As we practice the art of forgiveness, it becomes a skill that builds our lives.

Perhaps one has wronged us and has apologized or perhaps no 'sorry" was offered.

Perhaps in our estimation, another does not deserve forgiveness. We therefore hang onto our opinion and thoughts of revenge because we think that the offering of forgiveness makes another's wrong okay.

I think I've lived enough of life to realize that there is little that we can do to control it.

Many of us work very hard in an attempt to balance our lives in different areas, only to find that our plan is interrupted.

Interruption should be expected. Careers change, relocation is normal, sickness and death are a reality, a baby is birthed, marriage and divorce should bring radical change to one's life.

The adjustments of life pull more out of us and our reserves are depleted more quickly in these times.

Early days in my crisis, one well meaning soul advised that I should get back to the gym regularly to help relieve my anxiety. Meanwhile, my life was transitioning in every area. The thought of putting one more thing into my day was overwhelming.

The balanced life is not so much, giving equal energy into each area on a regular basis but that we recognize the need for shift in each season and cater accordingly.

Yes, it's important that we care for each area of our lives whether it be care of our body, soul or spirit. But we need to be gracious with one self.

In the last 18 months, I've found myself in the biggest battle yet. I say "yet" because no one knows the future. We can plan and have safeguards but God did not promise us safety nor happiness.

My arrival at this place is inconsequential. It's a place that I don't understand nor chose and I still debate it with God. He is my judge and the only One whose opinion truly counts.

No matter our walk though, there is a powerful verse in Psalm 126:5 that reads "Those who plant with tears reap the harvest with joyful shouts."

These are not just words of comfort but are words of action.

They are a war cry for those who are tired and have been worn down, even abandoned or no longer desire to walk the walk.

God knows that we wish to give up or stay in our pajamas all day. He knows that at times, when the sun rises, we desire the anonymity and mindlessness of sleep.

Our Father does not want us to wait though for a magic wand to wave happiness back into our lives.

Yes, there is pain and loss. Career, ministry, relationships and life are fragile and some times temporary. But to sow, even in bits and pieces, even if it's not obvious to others, even if it's into your own life, is important.

Sow some seeds. Sow into others and be generous. Doing this may seem so insignificant in comparison to your past life. Nevertheless, we are sowing in our tears, and waiting for the promised joy.

People post both their successes and pain on Facebook for all to see. We crave affirmation and value or we ask for prayer.

We oldies can be overwhelmed by this. We cheer ourselves by knowing that at some time, the young will become old and will face the same dilemma.

Nothing though is more important than face to face communication.

We tell ourselves that we have no time but to say this, is to say that another is unimportant.

Because we live in this world, we fail to develop needed skills. Email and texting allow us an alternative to face to face conversation but these methods can leave a recipient hurt and feeling betrayed.

Sometimes texting and email are convenient. They are a quick message or they may be an update for a business arrangement.

When used however to avoid confrontation or because we fear the words or thoughts of the other, we are using a wrong method.

Communication is a gift that enables us to strengthen relationships, particularly when we have a conversation face to face.

Relationships are the most valuable thing that we have on this earth.

To value a relationship beyond our fears is likely to produce long lasting relationship.

Shame speaks to us and says that setting a goal will only show our deficiency. We will fail again. Therefore to not try seems a safer option.

In shame, we tend to hide ourselves away and rarely are we honest with others. We fear others' rejection and the exposure of our inadequacies.

We can set goals in one area of life but neglect to do so in another where shame is present. We can regularly set goals regarding a career but avoid goal setting for our damaged marriage. One area of our life is rewarding and so we focus upon that but we avoid the other incessantly. We fear failure and so turn our attention elsewhere.

Shame envelopes us for various reasons whether it has been birthed out of hurt, neglect, abuse or past failure. There are many reasons but none have to prevent us from going forward.

No matter the reasons for shame, non investment of effort in this area is not a solution. The very first goal is to admit the presence of shame. And therefore question its place in one's life.

To ignore the presence of shame in our lives is a sad occurrence as it stands as the road block to a more fulfilling life. It robs others of truly knowing us and sharing in the benefits of our talents.

Shame should not be embraced as a part of who we are but rather exposed as the lie that it is.

Have you ever come to the end of the day and just as you climb into bed, realized that you have forgotten to do something that's important? For me it was the mortgage payment. And just when you think that your bank account is looking okay!

Yesterday's failures and disappointments can weigh us down and steal the joy out of our lives. They keep us awake at night when we wish to close our eyes and be removed from pain and problems.

Ive found that each day, when I open my eyes, that I should determine to shift my focus.

To focus on my failure brings depression and misery but to envision God beside me, the bearer of my burdens, brings a new perspective entirely.

We are being renewed daily but it cannot be done by my willpower and effort alone.

The Holy Spirit is in charge of my renewal and He's alive within me and you.

Pain and problems are a vital part of this renewal process and so, to determine, the small things for which we can give thanks, will bring a smile back to our face. (Psalm 73:23-24)

Some days are overwhelming. We don't know exactly the reason or perhaps we do.

We feel stuck in certain circumstances and that there are no options. God seems silent to our plight. Being content seems an impossibility.

I believe that our very first option though is to unload our burden onto God. We often withhold our pain from Him because we are so overwhelmed. We need to push ourselves out of a place of fear and acknowledge our frustration and pain to our Lord.

Releasing pent up feelings is a relief.

Out of this we can draw encouragement as our mind clears and we more likely can hear the voice of our Lord, our heavenly Father. He knows all and will not let us down, according to His promises. We may feel as if we are failing but he is not a failing God.

We need also to take our "spinning" mind from the dark places and cling to helpful Scriptures. These are like a medicine for an ailment and shift our thoughts heavenward, providing great relief.

We then see progress. We compare our state to just a few hours before when life seemed insurmountable. We once again see that we were built to overcome. (Psalm 92:1-2)