Saturday, June 4, 2011

Squash Soup with Chicken

Yesterday sucked. I couldn't take the pain anymore so I took the Vicodin, one every four hours... I think I got down four of them before I got so sick even my Compazine got barfed up. I haven't vomited in years; it's not pleasant, especially when you consider it's got to come past my tumor.

And why is it that when you don't eat, and you're sick, your glucose numbers go up? I see no logic in that! So I had to take a glipizide with my Januvia and that meant I had to eat and keep it down. I had a piece of sourdough toast. So far, so good.

The pain today is definitely not as bad as yesterday, but I have no energy. I went out to look at the crops, and barely got out there. Luckily, my sisters provided a chair so I sat and rested for a while. It's a beautiful day, but it's going to get pretty warm.

We gave a ton of squash to the neighbors yesterday, and Jane says she's going to make squash soup with chicken tonight. Nancy made me a light green beret out of some soft, soft felt material.

I'm trying hard not to get depressed, I'm not really the type to get depressed, but dang, pain wears you down. You just want to cry, but you're too tired to do even that. I don't even have the strength to sit here and play World of Warcraft. I cling to the sure knowledge that this pain is lessening, and will continue to lessen and I will get some strength back, and every day will get better. And then it will be time to do it all over again. :D See, that made me smile. It's crazy, I know.

3 comments:

(((((hugs)))))) I'm sorry you're having such a tough time at the moment and you're feeling so horrid. Pain and being ill are wearing so you're bound to be feeling down at the moment, but be gentle with yourself and allow yourself to feel however you feel. Things are tough enough for you right now, so the last thing you need is for you to be tough with yourself as well.

Hang on in there, honey. You'll get through.

BeckyP.S. I'm having a few problems leaving comments under my login (BeckyG) for some reason :o(

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About Me

I was diagnosed with Stage IV esophageal cancer in September of 2010. Now I'm fighting for every day I can get, as long as I get good days in the mix.
Then in May of 2011, I was diagnosed with ANOTHER primary cancer, this one much more lethal: Adrenal Gland Cancer.
I know far too much about fear, and I started this blog to help me control it, so that my last days on earth would not be ruled by fear.
I'm doing pretty well, so far. :)