Big Lead Sports Bar

1/25/2009

SB43: THE MOVIE

Ever wonder what would happen if there was a movie made about the big game? Of course not. But people are always doing fictional "casting calls" around the net, so I thought it was high time that some of the greatest "separated at births" were gathered together for a fictitious movie that will never be made. Your cast includes...

STEELERS:

QB Ben Roethlisberger will be played by The Burger King

WR Hines Ward will be played by rapper/actor LL Cool J

Backup QB Charlie Batch will be played by singer John Legend

D-Coordinator Dick LeBeau will be played by Crocodile Dundee, Paul Hogan

DB Ike Taylor will be played by rapper R. Kelly

DB William Gay will be played by terrified WR Reche Caldwell

2008 Steeler ROY Patrick Bailey will be played by Spiderman's James Franco

LB Larry Foote will be played by Cuba Gooding Jr

Backup QB Byron Leftwich will be played by "Rerun", Fred Berry

D-Lineman Chris Hoke will be played by Adam Savage of Mythbusters

RB Fast Willie Parker will be played by rapper Cassidy

O-lineman Trai Essex will be played by American Idol's Ruben Studdard

DB Anthony Madison will be played by the Food Network's Aaron McCargo

Much-maligned punter Mitch Berger will be played by Adam Carolla

WR Santonio Holmes will be played by wrestler Kofi Kingston

Offensive Coordinator Bruce Arians will be played by Bruce Willis

LB Andre Frazier will be played by rapper Timbaland

Steeler Alum Jerome Bettis will be played by Dr. Julius Hibbert of The Simpsons

LB James Harrison will be played by Tiny Lister Jr from Friday

Kicker Jeff Reed will be played by The Food Network's Guy Fieri

Troy Polamalu will be portrayed by guitarist Kim Thayil of Soundgarden

DE Orpheus Roye will be played by Mr. T.

Mascot Steely McBeam will be played by the construction worker from the Village People

Omar Epps takes on the role of Coach Mike Tomlin

Steelers Owner Dan Rooney will be portrayed by former NBA coach Hubie Brown

CARDINALS:

Coach Ken Whisenhunt will be played by his former boss, Bill Cowher

QB Kurt Warner will be played by the Simpsons' Lenny

Brenda Warner (pre-makeover) will be played by Dolph "Ivan Drago" Lundgren

QB Matt Leinart will be played by Bob Guiney of The Bachelor

RB Edgerrin James will be taken on by rapper Lil Wayne

All-World WR Larry Fitzgerald will be played by soccer star Ronaldinho