The Charge

Opening Statement

The American Action Movie isn't what it used to be. Our heroes, the men we
turn to when a goon deserves a dagger to the forehead or a corporate jackal
needs kicked out a window, have turned into conflicted whiners bogged down by so
much emotional baggage and "acting skills" that their kicks, punches,
and 'splosions are barely registering.

Not Sylvester Stallone. He left all that baggage in the terminal when he
made his super-group opus: The Expendables.

Facts of the Case

The Expendables are a group of elite mercenaries who are more than happy to
bust a few skulls for the right price. Like any good ragtag group, each
curiously-named member brings something unique to the table: Barney Ross
(Stallone), the quickdraw leader; Lee Christmas (Jason Statham), the knife guy;
Ying Yang (Jet Li), the karate expert; Gunner Jensen (Dolph Lundgren), the
shellshocked loose cannon; Toll Road (Randy Couture), the wrestler-in-therapy;
Hale Caesar (Terry Crews), the strongman with a nuke-shotgun; and Tool (Mickey
Rourke), their long winded tattoo artist and adviser.

The gang is hired by a CIA operative, Mr. Church (Bruce Willis), to
overthrow a puppet dictatorship on the island of Vilena in the Gulf of Mexico.
That's pretty much all you need to know.

The Evidence

The Expendables is a fantasy. A man-fantasy. Not that kind of
man-fantasy. You know what I mean. It's an imperfect, but admirable, dream come
true. I remember seeing it in theaters, at midnight in downtown Chicago, and
thinking to myself, as Terry Crews liquidized several nameless villains with his
massive shotgun, that this couldn't be happening. How is it that all of these
legendary action heroes, spanning over 30 years of film history, could be on the
screen together blowing up a dictator's house? How did Stallone pull this
off?

It's easy to be disappointed by The Expendables if you go in
expecting the Citizen Kane of blow-em-ups. It's certainly not. The story
is paper-thin, and the film suffers from some weird pacing (a problem Stallone
has in most of the movies he helms), overzealous editing, and more than a few
reasons to roll your eyes. But it has the heart of the '80s beating inside of
it. From the moment the gang rides into the picture on motorcycles to the cheesy
boys club ending, the film is an honest, hard-R throwback to the glory days.

Not surprisingly, the movie's steak-and-potatoes success is completely due
to its cast. Stallone used his Hollywood tenure to assemble the meanest ensemble
since 12 Angry Men. Sure he's missing greats like Van Damme and Seagal,
but you forget about them the second Dolph Lundgren screams some unintelligible
line and rips a dude in half with the pull of a trigger. Each of these guys gets
a moment to shine, but Stallone and Statham are the stars here: they go on their
intelligence missions together, they're the only ones dealing with "love
interests," and they single-handedly destroy an entire dock (and probably
the whole fishing industry) on the island of Vilena.

The chemistry between those two, along with the rest of the cast, is not
unlike that of a veteran bowling team or a band of actual bikers (and not bikers
happen to be mercenaries). The movie is fun because the actors are having fun.
They easily sell the hokiest lines of dialogue ("Bring it, happy
feet!") and can't help themselves from cracking a smile. Sure the acting
isn't great, but who cares? Just wait until the Stallone/Schwarzenegger/Willis
scene; for all its annoyingly claustrophobic framing, it's one of the best
"non-killing-everyone" moments in the movie.

Stallone's directorial sensibilities are about as efficient as his
screenplay. As in Rambo, Sly knows how to show some shocking violence,
and his love for practical special effects and explosions gives the movie much
appreciated authenticity. If only the marquee hand-to-hand combat scenes weren't
shrouded in darkness and jump cuts. The Stallone/Steve Austin fight (which sent
Sly to the hospital) is an ineffective mess -- the same with both Lundgren/Li
showdowns. But for every fight spoiled by modern editing, there's scenes like
Jason Statham beating the tar out of a pick-up basketball team.

The film's South American locales and New Orleans warehouses look decent
enough on the standard definition DVD. While a few of the darker scenes in the
film are a little hard to decipher, the overall picture is solid. Even better is
the 5.1 Dolby Digital sound, which puts great emphasis on the film's copious
explosions, engine roars, and gunshots.

Accompanying the movie is an insightful commentary track from Sly, a deleted
scene, gag reel, behind-the-scenes featurette, and an archive of trailers and
posters. While it's not as expansive as I would have liked, what's here is
certainly appreciated.

Closing Statement

The reason '80s American Action Movies are so effective (awesome) is because
they're reacting to the tumultuous events of the 1970s: Vietnam, the energy
crisis, Watergate, etc. The reason The Expendables is so good is because
it's reacting to the state of the action genre in Hollywood. Stallone has called
together the League of Badasses to deliver a film that pays homage, in the most
earnest way possible, to our Greatest Generation of Action Movies.

Expect nothing more than a hearty dose of red-blooded heroics and manly
camaraderie and you'll come away fulfilled, feeling like you just ate a 16-ounce
porterhouse.