oh right like twitter needed another reason to be awful

Rupert Murdoch Discovers Fun New Venue For Unrepentant Evil: Twitter

What does a bored kleptocrat billionaire who has already lived past his expiration date do to pass the time while he is on vacation in the Caribbean? If it’s Rupert Murdoch, he takes a webcam picture of his moldy white raisin mug, tacks it to his brand-new Twitter account and sets about mocking the working slobs of Great Britain for trying to act like rich folk and have their own vacations, TEE-HEE.

Whoops! His wicked seaside ramblings threw his wife into an illiterate twit-fit, and then he deleted the post, because that is not how you show Great Britain you are CONTRITE about illegally spying on their citizenry, for money.

His wife, Wendi Deng, also appears to have joined the increasingly ubiquitous microblogging site, quickly replied: “RUPERT!! delete tweet!!”

Within minutes the Wendi Deng account, which has not yet been verified and may not be genuine, continued: “EVERY1 @rupertmurdoch was only having a joke pROMSIE!!!”

Minutes later: “explaining to @rupertmurdoch about being careful with humor on line. sometimes it comes out as rude!”

About five hours later Mr Murdoch revealed his Twitter profile was causing people close to him some angst.
“I’m getting killed for fooling around here and friends frightened what I may really say!” he wrote.

Oh, but don’t worry. It’s not like Murdoch’s feed isn’t still full of hilarious, demonic twatterings like this one:

Aren’t bazillionaires supposed to be sort of smart or something, to have figured out how to amass all that insane wealth? [Sydney Morning Herald]

Rupert Murdoch is so old, he remembers when Ron Paul qualified for social security.

Millennial Malaise

Was that before or after Dr. Paul qualified for the gold plated congressional health plan, or the lifetime of retirement pay?

OneDollarJuana

But, but, he refused those because he's a libertarian, right?

Callyson

“explaining to @rupertmurdoch about being careful with hacking phones of dead people. sometimes it comes out as rude!”

Callyson

The decision of the octogenarian billionaire to embrace Twitter has been greeted with surprise by many, given his previous view of the internet as the home of "porn, thievery and hackers".
Yeah, because that territory belongs to Rupert Murdoch's publications…

Fare la Volpe

Didn't Murdoch INVENT the so-called Page Three Girl?

rocktonsam

I'm not going to let Rupert ruin my new favorite holiday.
The day after New Years Day day.
Suck it you prick!

PuckStopsHere

Maybe Brits ought to tax shit out of Rupert Murdoch and then they wouldn't be a broke country.

WOW!
A backwards somersault Godwin, with two twists, in the pike position.

10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 9.5

C_R_Eature

9.5? 9.5?! Those East German judges never give anyone a break.

user-of-owls

I've been practicing that move for years! 9.5. What a bitch. At least I think she's a bitch. Hard to say with all those muscles and facial hair.

C_R_Eature

Was a Bitch, I think. We won't know for sure until the genetic screening tests come back from the lab.

C_R_Eature

Awesome. I had to look him up. Just awesome.

flamingpdog

BUILD THE FENCE AROUND GERMANY!!!

Negropolis

Sounds like they arrested some random Mexican for good measure, though. Can't let it just be some angry German.

CrunchyKnee

That old fucker is on Twitter? They can't pass SOPA quick enough.

HateMachine

No, after SOPA is passed, ol' Roop's twats will be the only ones allowed on the twatosphere.

OneDollarJuana

And that will kill Twitter. Kinda like the voter suppression laws aimed at Democrats are keeping Gingrich off the Virginia ballot.

HateMachine

Kill Twitter? Please. How many millions do you think Murdoch would shovel on to the Twitterati people for a personal vanity messaging service? It might not get any hits or serve any purpose whatsoever, but they'll sure as shit keep the servers lit.

Wait, that was Ole Rupe's doing? Yeegads, I couldn't have left that pile sooner.

Radiotherapy

Glad to see it's only Jan. 2nd and the stupid is aflow.

C_R_Eature

Yes. Imagine what the rest of the year is going to be like, eh?

*collapses in heap, sobbing*

OneDollarJuana

When I look at a list of everything that's happened this year (a lot!) it kind of makes me think of 1967, another busy year.

C_R_Eature

Funny, I've been getting that kind of vibe, too.
The society seems to be in transition like 67 &68 – one can only hope to someplace better. I can do without the analog to the '68 summer city riots and the assassinations, though – if I had a choice.

I kept going answering each time it gave me 3 more questions to vote on thinking "When is the going to end?" Then, when it finally did end I was sad because I wanted it to ask me more questions. I felt like I lost a friend.

It's a good fertilizer; just make sure it doesn't get washed into the rivers.

Isyaignert

I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

An_Outhouse

One of the few states with wedded Santorum. The more the married-er.

Redhead

Phew. I don't have a twitter account – one less thing to worry about being hacked.

Texan_Bulldog

Like it's a shocker to discover that Rupert Murdoch is a big dick! Sorry, Wendi, we kind of already figured that out.

Loaded_Pants

She probably often thinks: "The stupid shit I have to deal with for the money."

Loaded_Pants

It's like when my great-grandmother finally figured out voice mail.

tessiee

My most recent temp job included the task of getting the messages that people left on voice mail when the office was closed evenings and weekends. Although the outgoing message clearly stated our hours and gave directions for leaving a message, we'd invariably get at least one message along the lines of:
"Hello? HELLO??? IS ANYBODY THERE?? HELLO?… [disappointed] Oh, it's one of those damn things… [trailing off] nobody's there…" [clunk of phone receiver being dropped]

Oh, holy fuckin' Jesus crimininy. I was so horrified/amused with this story, that I actually tried to post here under my real name (luckily that venture failed). When Ida Tarbell wrote the exposes of John D. Rockefeller at the turn of the last century, Rockefeller was equally clueless as to "what's the big deal?" On the other hand Rockefeller was actually producing something of utility to his victims. Murdoch's attitude is the result of international corporate inbreeding, and the result of that is not pretty.

Oh Rupe, just die already and get the fuck over it. You've made your empire, time for the kids to fuck it all up beyond recognition. It should be interesting to see what his rental unit Wendi gets when the will settles. Maybe she will become the mistress of all media.

Loaded_Pants

You just know the years-long legal fight over the will will start as soon as his body is plasticized & put into a glass coffin in the Fox News lobby.

Rotundo_

I'm not so sure it would be at Fox News. More likely over at the Sun or one of the British tabloids. Now when Ailes kicks, they will have him in a glass box glowering over all the news droids and blond newreader/spokesmodels/vacant cranium-types at Fox News. Ailes *is* Fox News, the poisonous fuck. I'd love to know who will replace him. Perhaps Rove?

Loaded_Pants

Good point. Maybe they'll just divide Rupert's parts up and distribute them like the Catholic Church did with "relics".

Rotundo_

Send the genitals to be displayed in Ailes mouth. Fitting final resting place for them.

Grandpa Simpson: That's it! I'm not speaking to you!
Homer Simpson: But how will I know what you had for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day?
Grandpa: You'll have to read my blog. [gestures to computer screen displaying picture of Grandpa and "WhyEverythingStinksNowadays.com"]

I've given up on the quaint idea that being rich means being smart. Too much contradictory data accumulating: Trump, Cain, Murdoch, etc. I'm beginning to think the key to wealth is knowing how to intimidate smart people. You start out bullying the nerd into giving you the answers for the test, you end up old, stupid, loud and owning a bunch of stuff.

Geminisunmars

Old, stupid, loud and owning a bunch of stuff is not way to go through life.

emmelemm

Actually, it sounds like a pretty good way to go through life. For the person in question. Everyone around them, however…

ShaveTheWhales

Actually, the usual path to riches is much simpler: inherit them.

SpiderCrab

Repulsive old geezer. When he swims the sharks are repelled by his stink.

Rest assured she's well compensated for the trouble. She may be a rental unit, but she's collecting good money doing so. She must have a hell of a time finding the damned thing. That's where a woman's natural advantage shines in manual dexterity, hands like a surgeon I'd imagine.

OT, but can we please, please, please get rid if the iced tea shocker and bring back kortney?

Rotundo_

It's kind of a "good cop-bad cop" thing with PETA- one minute they have you staring blankly with a puddle of drool collecting on your keyboard, and then-WHAM! it's the gore and torture stuff with animal research facilities and stuff. I do understand the issues behind where they stand, but it loses something in the translation when you are gagging or getting an erection. It's difficult to get the message when autonomic reactions are already kicking in.

HedonismBot

I'm not afraid to admit, the first time I saw the "iced tea shocker," for the briefest of moments I actually thought I was looking at a nude female posterior. Someone please tell me I'm not the only one.
Paging Dr. Freud…

Unsurprisingly, the fake Rupert Murdoch feed can't even dream of being as blithely, unthinkingly evil as the actual Rupert Murdoch is. But for those who enjoy that sort of thing, I do think @RupertMurdochPR is rather well done.

FlyOverGirl

You know who else is glad to see Santorum surging?

Isyaignert

Okay, I'll bite, who else is glad to see Santorum surging?

Also, too, tell me about your mother. My mom's new nick name is the momster (like monster), not like she's hip or anything resembling that.

FlyOverGirl

Today my mother has been half way decent. The bad run-in which I can tell in a coherent manner was at Christmas.

I've developed a weird allergy/reaction to Soy Lecithin (it's an emulsifier found in most chocolates), and we worked like crazy to track down a chocolate bar without ingredient for me for Christmas. Finally found one at Trader Joe's without Soy Lecithin in it, and yeah, she was a part of the search.

So December 26, I'm finishing up my breakfast and taking dishes to the kitchen to come back to the living room to find Mom sneaking a bite of the hard found chocolate bar. Not that I'd be okay with it at any other given time of the day, but goddamn, this is 8:30 am.

So the YELLING begins from me about why she needed to do that. Notably that she purposefully snuck the bite while I was out of the room.

Her reply varies from "I just wanted to know what it tasted like," to "the devil made me do it," to my nieces would have found it there anyway and eaten it (they showed no interest in it or any other chocolate to be honest).

Seriously, WTF.?? The devil made me do it….

So yeah, that's my Mom.

New Year's Eve is a different issue. Not sure I can explain that one yet.

And I was thinking Dan Savage would really like to see Santorum surging ;)

FlyOverGirl

The fun part I should add is — last night I had to explain Santorum to my mother. We never got to the actual realities of what Santorum is; just that it's something gross from sex and Dan Savage took revenge with Google on Rick Santorum being a jerk. Mind you, she doesn't have a computer or use the internet so I also had to explain the whole Google machine and how those web site thingys get propelled to the top.

So should we put our mothers together?

C_R_Eature

The OxyClean Company?

Radiotherapy

The Butthole Surfers?

BarackMyWorld

Ted Haggard?

(Yup…that joke works on 2 levels!)

ProgressiveInga

The owner of The Boone Pizza Ranch in Boone, IA?:
"The Boone Pizza Ranch named their chicken salad after Rick Santorum on Monday after the staff asked him to try their signature dish and he said he liked it."

"I'll keep it short and sweet. Family, religion, friendship … these are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business."

Loaded_Pants

A friend of mine used to work for Shank of America for years. He quit after he heard a conversation between two top executives in a elevator. My friend was up for a big promotion. But he concluded that they were complete psychopaths & he decided he had no interest in joining their ranks. Good call.

Radiotherapy

In all of my dealings with middle management and up over the last 25+ years I've come to the same conclusion: they are all sociopaths. The capitalism train is driven by these nerve-racking, avaricious, hardly fellow human beans.

Indeed. And they work hard on training themselves to be that way. To see their fellow humans as fungible cogs in the economic system they serve. Our overlords could not oppress we the people so thorougly without these banal Evils merrily manning the controls.

Aren’t bazillionaires supposed to be sort of smart or something, to have figured out how to amass all that insane wealth?

If you are ruthless and a raging dick, intelligence matters not one iota.

Bluestatelibel

Yeah, you lazy Brits, get back to work. I expect you all thought you could leave early Christmas Eve, and show up a little late the day after, too – all on your employer's shilling! And you even thought you might enjoy a nice dinner with the family, including that little crippled kid, right? Bah, humbug.

I'll bet he's never read the book, or if he has, that he doesn't see the parallels.

chascates

Optimism: Bachmann also insisted that regardless of how she performs in Iowa, her campaign has the funds and structure to continue the fight to other states. “We’ve already bought our plane tickets,” she said indicating that they were ready to move on to New Hampshire.

These fucks want to fight reality and they're betting they'll win. No wonder they want control of the Internet. I'm just flapdoodled by them. They will NOT believe whatever happened, if they don't want to, and that's how the world works, so there.

Biff

That fuckweasel almost cost me a flatscreen. And a .357 cartridge. OTOH, way to go Leslie Stahl.

C_R_Eature

Elvis! Is that you?

When did you get back from Kepler-22b?

Fukui_SanYesOta

I just watched that myself – the part where they just show the footage of Reagan saying "it's a compromise" is priceless.

HedonismBot

I saw a brief portion of that "60 Minutes" clip last night too, but I had the mute on and I didn't watch nor listen to any of it. I was nursing a hangover, but otherwise having a good day and feeling optimistic about what 2012 may bring. I had no desire to ruin these feelings by exposing myself to ratface fuck Cantor and whatever evil bullshit he's cooking up this time. Sometimes it's better just to ignore it all and say fuck it.

Nothing useful to add except that Wendy's last name is pronounced "dung", not "dang" like everyone is always saying on teevee.

HedonismBot

People pronounce Boehner as "Bay-ner," and I never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever heard a newscaster refer to George W. Bush as "George Bush Junior."
Anthony Weiner may have been a (minor) sex creep, but at least he didn't cop out and pronounce his name as "Way-ner." The dude owned his unfortunate name (no dick jokes intended) and kicked ass as a proudly liberal politician, until the sexting caught up to him.

Except it's not really "dung," either, but more like a soft t followed by an "ng".

Very hard to tell, le, must hear.

anniegetyerfun

Well, Mandarin has a softer d than English, but it's not a t, either. And it's not like it's missing a vowel.

Negropolis

Someone please tell me that the Nightmare Before Christmas's Doctor Finklestein was based on Rupert Murdoch.

Negropolis

BTW, greed doesn't have to be smart to attract and keep wealth. It just has to be overwhelming, willfull, and without real self-reflection. The more greed thinks, the more it puts itself in danger of finding or remembering a long buried conscience and responsibility.