Wanting it to be over

For the past month I have put everything in my life on hold to try and get my shit togerther, but after giving it everything I had I realize that I failed completly. I have made no progress emotionally, I feel terriable, and I dont see anything that resemables a positive outcome in my future. For years I knew how it was going to end but rather then accept the truth, I continued to relied on false hope now reality is going to hit me and any chance of hapieness, or normalcy, or something that would give me a reason to live will be out of reach and now I have to accept the truth that for as long as I live I will be miserable and alone.

I understand how you're feeling. I'm not gonna tell you what to do, as I think something like this should always be your own choice. But please make sure this is what you really want to do because once you do it, if you succeed, it can't be undone.