There is a strong link between body and mind, and learning to control your thoughts will give you more power over your body.

Basically, if you want to change your life, you have to change your thoughts.

It Starts with a Mindset

Changing the way you think can be daunting at first, but being willing to try is the first step towards achieving this change.

It all centers on intentionality. For example, if you’re trying to exercise more, the first step is getting off the couch and putting on your trainers.

Developing a mindset is an exercise of the mind: it requires motivation, determination, and patience.

You can’t expect yourself to immediately eradicate all negative thoughts from the very beginning, because the muscle that creates the positive thoughts won’t be strong enough until you’ve trained it.

Start Small

Lao Tzu once said that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Pick one thing that you want to change, and focus your energy on it.

Do you have a problem with negative self-talk? Write out motivational sayings on post-it notes and stick them in places where your forced to see them.You want to boost the positivity in your life and take the energy away from the negative.

In doing so, you might not see the immediate changes, but your body will have already begun the biochemical process towards change.

Like all things in life, if you want things to change, you have to work to change them, but don’t be too hard on yourself if it doesn’t happen all at once. You will have off days, that’s ok, you’re a human being.

It’s definitely a process. but developing a positive mindset is the key to long term success and happiness in this life, and you are the one who is in charge of shaping it.

It’s a wonderful feeling to realize this, to know that you are not powerless, that you are instead strong and capable.

The opportunity for you to live the life you want lies before you, all you have to do is reach out and take it.

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It’s a rare and beautiful thing when a woman is completely comfortable in her own skin, but for many of us, having this sense of confidence is something we have to work to develop. As a boudoir photographer, you’ll occasionally have a client who’s completely fearless right from the beginning, but this is really the exception, not the rule.

It’s up to you to create a safe environment where anyone, no matter their level of confidence, will feel comfortable being photographed.

Here’s a three step formula for helping your clients get comfortable and become more naturally confident.

Keep It Warm

If she’s going to be scantily clad, the very least you can do is crank up the heat and offer her a fluffy robe while she’s getting her makeup done. If she’s shivering and breaking out in gooseflesh during the shoot, she’s not going to feel very confident. She’ll be thinking about putting her clothes back on.

A Touch of Luxury

Girls LOVE to be pampered, and the royal treatment goes along way towards boosting confidence.

Including mani/pedis, chocolate covered strawberries, champagne, scented candles etc. in your boudoir session communicates to your client just how worth it she is, and she’ll begin to believe it, which will show up in the photographs.

Check Your Attitude

You are the one who ultimately affects the environment of a boudoir session.

If you’re uptight and nervous, your client will be as well. So, first, just relax! If you can’t be calm and confident around your clients, then maybe you’re in the wrong business!

Set the tone by talking to her. Compliment her, ask her what music makes her feel sexy and then play it, do what you can to set her mind at ease. If you’re intentional about creating a warm, inviting experience, then you can make it happen – but it all starts with you.

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“Technique undoubtedly helps make photography magical, but I prefer to work with atmosphere.

I think that the obsession with technique is a male thing. Boy’s toys.

They love playing.. but once you’ve perfected something, you have start searching for a new toy.

I would rather search for a new model or location.” ― Ellen Von Unwerth

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The tantalizing work of Ellen Von Unwerth is something that, once seen, will not easily be forgotten.

To call her photographs sexy is an understatement, as she has effectively taken the world of fashion erotica and stamped her name across it.

She can take everyday items and make them fabulous, just like she can take the world’s most beautiful people and make them timeless. Model-turned-fashion photographer, Von Unwerth’s illustrious photographs have been featured in Vogue and Vanity Fair alongside countless commercial ads and editorial pieces.

Although she’s almost sixty, she has shown no sign of stopping, and her recent work is just as outstanding as it has been in decades past. Ellen von Unwerth consistently pushes the boundaries of what is considered “normal” in the fashion world.

Her brazen style and innate talent for casting and photographing models who pull in viewers is an inspiration to many who are trying to break out in the world of photography.

She teaches us to be bold, to be fearless in our art, because the risks we take are what we will be remembered for.

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If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it.

On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.” – Gandhi

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As a generation we are incredibly lucky.

We have access to more opportunities now than we’ve ever had before.

The only thing separating us from enjoying these opportunities is a spirit of optimism and a great deal of hard work.

Henry Hartman once said that success always comes when preparation meets opportunity.

If you want to achieve your dreams, and the chances for success are higher now than they’ve ever been, you have to be ready for it, and you have to believe it’s possible.

Cultivating a Spirit of Optimism

Let’s face it, life is often difficult. You can spend months working on a project only to have it be rejected, you can enter contests and not even place, you can network like crazy and not get any immediate leads.

For many people these roadblocks are so discouraging they won’t continue, because if they fail once, what proof do they have that they won’t fail again?

There isn’t any. Thats where optimism comes in.

Cultivating a spirit of optimism is about developing a healthy relationship with failure, learning how to fall down seven times and then stand up eight, and realizing that the path to success is often paved with rejection.

It’s also about understanding that taking risks means that you could fail, but it also means that you may succeed valiantly.

You have to set aside your fear of failure, because failure isn’t permanent unless you make it permanent.

Instead, failure teaches us what doesn’t work, so that we can do it better. Failure instructs us how to improve, and challenges how to strive harder.

Refiner’s Fire

When metallurgists refine precious metals so that they become the highest quality they can be, the process is not exactly pleasant for the metals.

In order to separate the precious metal from lead or other less desirable materials, they undergo a refining process called “cupellation.” Cupellation, also know as fire assay, is the process whereby metals are exposed to high temperatures to get rid of unwanted materials. Precious metals like gold and silver melt at much higher temperatures than lead, zinc or copper – so when all are exposed to the heat, only the more valuable materials remain.

In your life, you have to choose whether or not you want to be listed among the precious metals, or if you want to settle for less.

Failure operates like the refiner’s fire: it can either shape and define you, making you stronger and more desirable, or it can destroy you.

There is Gold in You

Whether you yet believe it or not, there is gold in you. Each and every person has something to offer this world that they alone can offer. You have every capability of dreaming great things and then pursuing those dreams.

There’s no universal code of “success.” It differs from person to person as much as dreams do.

You have all the tools necessary to be successful in this life, but nothing is going to be handed to you, you have to work for it.

You have to experience failure and you have to let it make you stronger, you need to sometimes go through the fire so that you can come through it pure as polished gold.

So dream big, take risks, and work as hard as you possibly can.

You are unique and you are valuable, but only through persistent effort and faith in yourself will you be able to shine.