Living with a Roommate

Sharing Space

The college roommate experience can be one of the most gratifying yet sometimes trying times in your college career. You may encounter values and concepts that you never knew existed.

For many, this will be the first time you have had to share their space. This sharing will require that you learn how your behaviors and actions both positively and negatively affect others.

We encourage each student to open his or her mind to themselves and others. As with all things of worth, it will take effort, initiative and understanding.

Learning how to establish a relationship with another is essential knowledge for any career or activity.

For Fall, most new students receive their roommates' names and contact information in June. For Spring, most students receive their roommates' names and contact information in early February. Roommates should contact one another and begin discussing how they intend to share the space in the room as well as what they hope their relationship will be.

It is especially important that students who are not arriving at the same time have a plan for how the room will be set up and how space will be shared.

Standard triple rooms furnishings:

Three bunkable XL twin beds (36 x 80" mattresses). Two beds are likely to be bunked when you arrive in the room.

*See your room's specific floor plan (available from the tour page for your building) for information on what furniture is in your room.

If you arrive earlier than your roommates, please be considerate of the room arrangements you discussed before move-in.

As a team, you and your new roommates may decide to share the space as we suggest or come up with your own configuration. Either way, it must be done with the agreement of all three students. If there are any questions or if you need assistance in negotiating the shared space, please contact your resident assistant (RA) or the residence hall coordinator (RHC) of your building.

Additionally, students may opt to order a loft from bedloft.com to maximize space.

The Roommate Relationship

Some things to keep in mind include:

You should talk about ideas and feelings as well as just "things".

You should make sure you have the facts straight.

You are encouraged to be honest about your feelings, likes and dislikes.

You should be willing to compromise, but know which issues you will not compromise on and which ones are open for negotiation.

You should give your roommate the respect, consideration and understanding you expect in return.

You should expect some defensiveness, possibly even after a confrontation.

You should give your roommate(s) an opportunity to think about what has been said.

You should set the "tone" for talking and set aside the appropriate amount of time for a complete conversation. Five minutes before class is not the time for a heart-to-heart.

You should discuss your roommate problems with your roommate or hall staff only and not with others.

Try and separate yourself from any anger. You will get better results by remaining calm and rational and anger may just fuel the situation.

Have a solution in mind.

You should not assume a "victim" mentality; It is within your control to address the situation and take action. Inaction is an option but then you must accept the consequences of choosing no action.

You should commit yourself to listening. Everyone wants to be heard and only by listening to your roommate's point of view can you understand and better resolve any conflict.

Values, feelings and ideas change and that's OK. Don't feel betrayed if your roommate seems different after a while.

If problems between roommates persist, you are encouraged to seek assistance from a Residence Life & Housing staff member.