Humor From the Weekend

When I upset the Mrs. in ICC 25, she jokingly said in raid that she was taking applications for a new husband. Just as a preface, my wife is probably two to three times more popular than I am in the guild, and I’m not exactly hated…much. Needless to say, raid chat went nuts. This eventually made its way to our Guild website and forums. One member was put up to changing our standard guild app into a “Husband Application” and I’ve included it here. I was sitting next to the Mrs. when she read it, and I thought my eardrums might rupture from the laughter.

Here it is in its entirety. There’s a few inside jokes here, but regardless, it’s quite funny. Real names have been changed; everything else was left as-is. Enjoy…

Name: [Dude from Bucklers]

Age: 20Race: CaucasianClass: Yes…I has itSpec: Protection

Why do you want to marry [The Mrs]? How did you find her and her application?

– I would like to marry [The Mrs] because we have been great friends since I met her and we’ve exchanged mail IRL and seem very compatible. I found out about this opportunity in-game during ICC 25.

What marriages were you in previously? Why did you leave?

– None, and I’ll never leave you.

What aspect of [The Mrs] do you enjoy the most; what keeps you interested and involved?

– I enjoy her friendliness towards me and her genuine concern when I’m not feeling well. Her care-packages and availability keep me interested.

How long have you been playing the game?

– I have never “played the game” with another girl, if you know what I mean

What time zone would you like our honeymoon to be in?

– Our time zone <# wherever that may take us.

What professions do you have and what are their skill levels? Do you have any notable recipes?

– I’m an engineer IRL. On a scale from 1 to awesome, I would rate my skill level somewhere around ridiculous. Recipes (schematics) include: robots that clean up the house, the W0M4N-4000 sammich maker, and the Kloset Kleaner v3.3.3

Do you have any other relational commitments, such as other marriages you are a member of?

– I SAID NO!

Have you read the “Read Before Applying” post, and do you have any comments, concerns, or questions?

– I don’t need a “Read Before Applying” post, I know what I’m getting into.
Comments: <#
Concerns: Not being able to describe the awesomeness of our marriage
Questions: Want to see me run to the store and back for you?….5 sec later….Want to see that again?

If there’s anything else you would like me to know about you, please feel free to write it here.
Also, if you have any mutual friends, please make note of it here.

– I enjoy long vacations at Hilton Head beach, I can hook up a headset faster than you can say “[Samueltempus] why haven’t you fixed my mic!”, and I am used to farming exalted reps, so making a come back if I ever upset you won’t take too long.

I know most of the people you hang out with in WoW.

Thank you for taking the time to consider my application.

On a serious note: don’t worry, we’re not having any marital issues, just in the middle of a lot of renovations at the new house, and it’s testing season at school, so stress levels are high. Despite that, we’re really excited about the new house. When the painting is done and we get some furniture moved in, I’ll post a few pics for you to peruse.

9 Responses to Humor From the Weekend

omg im famous! ihave to claim this, iput a lot of time into making it as professional and humorous as icould. ieven got referred by another website. and revix said he was disappointed in it, ha! ithink this could revive my blog, seeing how much people can enjoy my work.

omg im famous, ihave to claim this! iput a lot of time into making it as professional and humorous as icould. ieven got referred by another website. and revix said he was disappointed in it, ha! ithink this could revive my blog, seeing how much people can enjoy my work.