I wonder how long it will take me to stop telling Josh randomly "hey you're married!"
hehe.
it's just so funny to me. I've found my one. it's just crazy that after all that planning the day zipped by and now I'm a Mrs.
i can't wait to get all my stuff changed over to my new name. it will be so weird to start going by a new name! it was funny cause this morning i tried to log into my other work's email...and i was denied. i was like wtf. so i called our IT guy and he was like i wanted to surprise you, now you have to log in with your new name!
so the change has begun!

The day went off without a hitch. I decided early on to just go with the flow and not let a thing stress me out. That was the best thing I could promise myself for that day.
We had a wedding at my mom's house. There was supposed to be rain that day so the day before our friends came over to put up a tent just in case. I didn't really know it was silver but it was no big deal, I just was like "it is what it is".
Friday morning I got up and took a shower, fed our boys breakfast and my honey took off to do his running around that morning. Kerry and I made sure to be out of the house by the time that he got back since we wanted to not see each other the whole day.
We went over to my mom's and they had so much done already. It was starting to come together.
They were putting up our arch and doing the tulle on it and my mom asked if it was to my liking. It's perfect is what I said. Everything looked perfect and I was happy with all of it.
At 2 we headed to the salon to get my hair done, my friend and hairdresser Wendy was so surprised at how laid back I was. I was totally nonchalant and in a great mood. No stress for me.
I loved my hair, it was perfect. My other girlfriend Kristen met us at the salon which was a surprise. She left work early to get her hair done while we were still there. Wendy wouldn't let us pay for our hair. I was humbled...it was such a great day so far.
After my hair I made sure to get something to eat since I hadn't eaten anything all day. Kristen called my mom to tell her that they better make sure I ate!
When I got back everything was gorgeous, my mom had the whole house and backyard set up.
The cake lady came and wasn't exactly what we had drawn up for her. We knew it couldn't be bright white since we had cream cheese frosting....but the decorations were off and the ribbon was too small...still I shrugged it off and told her it was perfect.
Kerry, my sister and I went up to my mom's room and worked on the ITunes song list for outside and gabbed upstairs. I heard Josh (my love) and his mom and our boys get there at some point and knew that this was it. I wouldn't be going back downstairs again until I was about to walk down the aisle.
Kerry did my makeup and it was fabulous. I started putting on my undergarments and my shoes (red chucks, teehee) and realized that I forgot my something old which was my Mammaw's wedding ring. My mom went through her jewelry box and found something for me. I wanted to cry, but stuck with my motto and everything was fine.
My girls really took care of me. They made me feel so beautiful and special. They were just what I would have wanted of bridesmaids if I had any. They were my unofficial bridesmaids.

Josh sent up a cup of Sparks for me. I was getting so nervous but so excited.
They got my dress on me and started putting on some sparkly lotion on my arms and making my tattoos look shiny and pretty. Mom got some glitter stuff on my dress and started freaking out. I was totally calm and like ok mom it's ok.
Once it was all on and adjusted my mom started crying. I told her she better not make me cry! haha.
Everyone went downstairs except Kristen and I. She was helping adjust my dress and going to make sure I didn't fall down the stairs! haha.
She told me I looked gorgeous and I had to keep back more tears.
It was time. I walked out and all I saw were people smiling at me. It was so overwhelming. I tried so hard to not cry. I didn't know where to look and just sort of looked around and smiled and tried to keep it together. I tried to remember to walk slow but I felt like I beelined for Josh. He looked so handsome. I almost tripped on the aisle runner we had put down. It was on grass after all. But, it helped break the ice a bit. I finally made it up to Josh and Jesse. Jesse started speaking and I felt like I had tunnel vision. It went by so FAST. In a flash it was our turn to do our vows. Josh asked if I wanted to go first. I said NO! haha. That made people laugh. So he said his vows so loud and with conviction. Then there was no other choice! It was my turn. I tried to get through them, my voice was quivery and I started to cry a little. Then it was over. Jesse finished up and told us to kiss.
Everyone cheered.....
From that point on it was all a blur! We had a great time. Did a lot of talking to friends and I didn't eat much at all.
Josh got us a 15 year Unibrou to share for our first drink together. (we're not really champagne people)
It was a great night. We didn't get any real "family" pictures to speak of. We tried to get a few of the four of us, (Josh and I and the boys) It's a bit difficult to get four people when two of those are babies to look all in the same direction. But the pictures that I've seen so far are great!
It was a beautiful day and we were so lucky to have such great people in our lives that made the day even more special.
I had a great time. I hope everyone else enjoyed themselves.

I don't even know where to begin about the last four days!
The visit with Kerry was amazing. It wasn't awkward one moment. We had a great time and I wish she didn't have to leave so soon.
We're married!!!!!!!! It was so great. I was determined to not go bridezilla that day and took everything in stride and kept a positive attitude. The day was wonderful. My hair came out fabulous, Kerry is a magician with makeup. Even I thought I looked pretty :) Kristen was awesome and took care of me before the ceremony and got me all calm and helped me down the stairs. They were both so great.
I'm pretty sure everyone had fun.
I can't wait to get the pictures to show everyone.

The past couple of nights have been rough with the boys. I've lost my temper with Josh a couple times, not because he did anything...just because I was frustrated over the situation.
They haven't wanted to sleep at all at night lately. I'm exhausted.

My wedding present from Joshua was my heart tattoos! yay!
They were devil and angel hearts he drew me when we first started dating. I've wanted them on the backs of my legs for two years now.
Let me tell you, the calves are NO FUN being tattooed.
I only made it through one outline and shading. We have an appointment to go back for the other and color on both.
Josh got his wedding ring tattoo. He got an XIII on his ring finger for our wedding day.

When I have more wits about me I'll try to write up a proper post about it all...with pictures eventually.

We're at my mom's now and I'm trying to get our playlist together for the outside music.
The boys were awful last night and we got barely any sleep. That sucked.....but I'm not too sleepy today.
Poor Josh sounded stress. We saw each other for the last time as "boyfriend" "girlfriend" this morning...I won't see him again til I walk outside and down the "aisle"!
I like quotations today! haha.
I feel giddy and am so nervous about keeping it together while reading our vows. I have a hard time with emotion....and this will be SO hard in front of so many people.
But, it will be people that love us and that feels good.
When I get back on I'll be a Mrs.
:)

my goodness i'm a mess today! i'm so nervous for tonight, excited to see kerry the most! haha.
i'm excited to see my dad and patty on friday...and just get everyone together and have fun friday night. it's going to be wonderful.
i'm so nervous about my hair. i can't even read our vows over anymore. everytime i do i cry. thinking of seeing josh waiting for me when i walk out makes me cry. goodness.
we have so much to do. josh has his timeline written out for that day. he has a ton of things to do apparently and most that he can't tell me because they're his super secret stuff.
i bought his wedding present. i got him a pocket watch and had it engraved. on the front i put what we have inside of our rings "always and forever" and on the back it says "meet me at 7" and the date. i hope he likes it. i'm going to leave it in our room when i leave the house for the day, on the bed so he can find it with the meet me at part up.
i bought my mom a thank you card yesterday and i want to write out some long mushy stuff in it. she has done SO much for this wedding and has been such a huge help. she's been amazing.
i want her to know how much i appreciate all her hard work for this.

they're buying us lunch here at work today. yay.

tonight we have to clean the office, print out our vows and little cards for the cameras...and i need to steal a hole puncher to bring home so we can finish up our guest book.

I have so many things to be excited about.
Our boys are thriving and getting so big. I can't believe how fast they're growing. Taylor says dadadadada none stop and Callum says mamamama non stop. It's a nice balance. they're so smart and such good babies.

I'm getting married to the absolute love of my life. he is my everything. i knew before we were dating that we would be married. we even talked about going to vegas to get married when we were still just "friends". he understands me and lets me be me. i can be a total jackass and he can still look at me and tell me i'm sexy or that he loves me. he amazes me everyday.
i can't wait to call him my husband. i can't wait for us to grow old together and take care of each other. i can't wait to watch our children grow together.

one of the most things i'm excited about is getting to meet my best friend finally.
that's right....i've never met her in person. she's been my rock for nearly 2 and a half years. we met online and have talked on the phone and online everyday since we met.
she's helped us when we needed help and most of all she's been there to get me through anything going on at any given time. she is another great person in my life that lets me be me. she lets me freak out and act a fool and can still call me a friend and tell me she loves me. i'm so very lucky to have met her. she is so talented and such a great person. i can't wait to meet her and give her the hug i've been waiting to give her all these years.
it's only right that she's here to watch us marry. she's been through everything with me. she's been there to support me through all the crap i went through at the end of my last relationship....the fear of starting a new one, all of my insecurities and the surprise of my pregnancy, to the birth of my boys. Kerry, I love you. I can't wait to see you!!!!!

and...in baby news!
both my boys can sit up now!!!
Callum has such great balance, in the beginning when Taylor was learning he would get excited and fall over. Callum can keep himself up or catch himself.
I can't believe I have such big boys now.

Friday: stayed home, ate left overs and watched the prestige with my love. tried to fix the home computer, it's still broken and won't repair or let me delete and reinstall windows. yay.
put together the boy's new stroller.

Saturday: got up, fed the boys had some playmat time. mom came over to watch the boys, josh and i went and got our hairs did. i love my haircolor. yay it's all one color now and not light on top and dark on the bottom. it looks so healthy. Wendy is awesome and such a sweetheart. we talked about what we're doing with it Friday.
went to the mall with the new stroller, checked out what size the boys feets are. Taylor is a size 3 and Callum is a 2. we couldn't find any baby chucks we wanted. we got Jesse a flask for performing our ceremony (it's what his wife said he wanted) we got it engraved with his initials.
were stopped a billion and eight times in the mall for people to ask "are they twins?" or "boy you have your hands full" decided i would start gouging eyes out if i heard "boy you have your hands full" one more time. either that or people just would totally stop in their tracks and point and talk amongst themselves about "the twins". good lord we're a freak show.
went and picked up Josh's pants finally hemmed.
tried to stretch my ears to a 6, i did a lot of crying and bleeding and am still at an 8 wtf.
this stretch sucks.
now i have no IDEA what I'm going to wear in my ears for the wedding. totally fucking blows.

Sunday: got up, fed the boys breakfast. Kristen and Jesse came over to give us our wedding gift. it was the computer chair we registered for! (we don't have a desk yet...or room for this giant box) but we'll need it someday.
we played with the boys and then got them ready to go to grandma's.
went to grandma's and they got to see their baskets and we took lots of pictures which i of course don't have since my computer is a piece of crap right now.
they looked adorable and liked to play with the plastic eggs.
we went and cleaned the office and ordered the boys red chucks for the wedding.
went and got the boys from grandma's and drove way to Josh's aunts house for Easter dinner. proceeded to stuff myself silly full of delicious ham.
got home and watched the sopranos and entourage (i can't spell).

i can't believe it's snowing right now. it was in the 80s last week.
i am freaking out because i checked the next 10 days and it says rain for our wedding day.
umm yeah outside wedding.
wee.
looks like we may need that tent that jesse & kristen have.

Last night I went to my mom's after work to see the silk bouquet I had ordered and check out some other things she has picked up. I took out a couple things from the bouquet and then we wrapped it with black ribbon and hot glued it. It looked pretty....it'll do :)
I ordered our shoes this morning. Our computer at home took a crap and that really sucks. I was planning on opening the shoe sizer I had on our computer and making it full size and putting the boys' feet up to it so I could figure out what size they are. So since that didn't work I just ordered mine and Josh's shoes. I'm wearing all red converse and he's wearing some steel toed Doc's. Yay for shoes we'll actually wear again. Makes me feel better buying both of them knowing we can use them again.

My mom emailed me her list of things to do last night.
I figured I'd share that...or just document for myself.

THE WEEK OF

GET AQUARIUM OUT OF SPARE ROOM
GET COUCH TO BASEMENT
DO LINENS (ONLY, NOT THE COMFORTER) FROM GUEST BED
VACUMN ALL FLOORS BATHROOM AND GUEST ROOM TOO
MOP
SCRUB BOTH BATHROOMS AND KITCHEN (PUT AWAY EVERYTHING ON COUNTERTOPS)
CLEAN OUT LINEN CLOSETCUT THE LITTLE PEARLS OFF THE RED ROSE CAKE TOPPER
STRAIGHTEN UP AREA OF BASEMENT

MONDAY

MOVE SWING TO GUEST ROOM
CLEAN ALL RUGS
PUT SILVER RIBBONS ON BUBBLES

WEDNESDAY

SHOP FOR FRUIT AND SODAS
MOVE HOT TUB STEPS TO SIDE OF TUB

THURSDAY

TAKE MEATBALLS OUT OF FREEZER
BLOW OFF PATIO AREA
MOVE SWING TO EDGE OF YARD

FRIDAY

JOSH SET UP LIGHTS
JOSH PICK UP BEER AND ICE ETC
PUT BLACK CUPS BY BEER
SET UP A BAR AREA INSIDE FOR WINE, PUT OUT WINE OPENERS AND CUPS AND STOPPERS
FLOYD PICK UP RENTALS (2 TABLES, 12 CHAIRS, 4 CANS STERNO 4 SERVING PIECES AND TWO CHAFING DISHES)
SET UP ALL RENTAL TABLES AND CHAIRS
PUT OUT ASHTRAYS
TAKE SHRIMP RINGS OUT OF FREEZER TO DEFROST
MOVE BIRD TO GUEST ROOM
PUT OUT BIG TRASH CANS
SET CANDLES AROUND HOUSE
PUT WHITE TABLE CLOTHS ON ALL INSIDE TABLES, DECORATE WITH RED ROSE PETALS
SET UP AND DECORATE THE ARCHWAY
OPEN WOODEN TABLE AND SET IN CORNER FOR CAKE TABLE
SET LARGE CENTERPIECE AND CANDLES ON CAKE TABLE
PUT OUT CAKE CUTTER
OPEN CAKE PLATES, FORKS AND NAPKINS FOR CAKE TABLE
SET UP CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN
MOVE FILE CABINET AGAINST LONG WALL FOR SNACKS
TRIM AND PUT BLACK TABLE CLOTHS ON TABLES OUTSIDE
SET CENTERPIECES
PUT OUT LINEN WALKWAY, DECORATE WITH ROSE PETALS
SET OUT GUEST MINTS
SET OUT BUBBLES
PUT UP SILVER PICTURE OF JOSH AND RHIANA

SHOPPING LIST

ELASTIC FOR PETTICOATSTAPERED DRIPLESS CRANBERRY CANDLES OR GET SMALL MIRRORS FOR UNDER THEM
PICKS FOR FRUIT FOUNTAIN
STRAWBERRIES
BANANAS
ANGLE FOOD CAKES
MARSHMALLOWS
WHAT ELSE FOR FRUIT PLATTER?????

I am so grateful for my family. Even when I am down or I hate our apartment I just look at the faces of the three most wonderful men in my life and all I feel is love.
I told Josh that some nights I miss us being able to sleep in the same bed all the time. But I wouldn't miss this time for the world. I know that there will be a day where my babies will be big boys and won't want to cuddle with mommy at night.
Callum was whiney this morning after his morning bottle and didn't want to go to sleep on his own, so as soon as I put him on my chest and covered him he went to sleep. I couldn't sleep, so I stayed up and kissed his face and rubbed his cheek.
They are just too beautiful for words. I can't believe that we made these gorgeous boys.

In a little over a week I'll be married to Josh and I'll share the same last name as my boys.
I've never been in love like I am with my three men. Josh is so good to me. I had no idea what a relationship was until we met.
I never knew someone could accept me for me, flaws and all...he loves me.
I adore him.