Ant-Man, Ant-Man, Ant-Man. Everybody wants to talk about the man of ants, and the director's chair that seemingly nobody wants. Not Edgar Wright. Not Adam McKay. Not Rawson Thurber! But what about Nicholas Stoller and Michael Dowse, the latest filmmakers rumored for the gig? If they say no, don't worry, we just checked with your building's super, your local mailman, and Roger Corman to see if they're available to direct. They all said the same thing.

Stoller and Dowse's names have been tossed into the mix by Deadline , which says that Marvel has gone silent as they are mulling over their options for the Ant-Man job. While there are certainly other names in consideration, Stoller and Dowse's names appear to be floating to the top. Don't know who they are? Allow us to break it down for you:

Nicholas Stoller

Whoa, talk about your wishful thinking! Stoller's on top of the world right now, having directed the $209 million-grossing Neighbors. Previously, he made such rowdy Apatow-era comedies like Forgetting Sarah Marshall and The Five Year Engagement. Even though it's very late in the game and the Ant-Man script remains in flux, Stoller would fit Marvel's tradition of frequently bringing on writer-directors to their projects, since so much of Marvel's movie gameplan comes from crazy make-'em-ups.

Stoller's movies are pretty ground-level as far as comedies go, however, and he's shown no actual aptitude for action. But maybe he's just waiting for his big opportunity? It doesn't seem like Stoller would be the guy to take this gig, particularly because he's got the clout to start making his cool-sounding Seth Rogen-Kevin Hart cop comedy.

Michael Dowse

Another white male? What are the odds?? Dowse is a Canadian filmmaker who recently directed What If, the new romantic comedy starring Daniel Radcliffe and the magical adorable wonderful Zoe Kazan. He's also got no real action movie experience, though he's known to blend comic chaos with a sort of sweetness. You can catch this in his severely-underrated Goon from 2011, which takes the violence and chaos of hockey and adds a dollop of romance to it. Unlike Stoller, Dowse isn't really in a position to say no easily to this job. But that hasn't stopped half of the DGA from basically rejecting the Ant-Man gig. Perhaps they should check back in with Roger Corman:

Alright, I''ll consider directing Ant-Man if we change the title to Insexty.