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Author
Topic: Question (Read 6709 times)

Hello,Just recently i saw this working girl , the last time i saw her was 4 years ago but when i saw her last week she had lost a lot of weight, she was extremely thin to the point i could see her rib cage and bones.I was a little concerned so i asked her if she was having an eating disorder and she told me " no way i don`t have any eating disorder" and she explained to me that the reason she lost so much weight was because of stress and her life.But i just don`t buy it since i have lot of stress in my life like many others do and we just don`t loose so much weight.After a wile that we where toghter i told her about a friend of mine who recently passed away of luchemia and she started to cry and this freaked me out , it look like somethign was troubling her and she wanted to say something but just couldn`t.I know that it is stupid to me to think she has HIV , i just don`t know and there is no way for me to know.The reason why i am scared the she might have it is because when i was in europe there was the girls of a friend of mine who was HIV+ ( from a blood transfusion) and she was extremely thin.And this working girls i saw reminded me of her.I did not have sex with her she just gave me oral sex without a condom.I am not going to say i am freaking out but i am a little scared at the moment.Like i sayd i don`t know if she is HIV+ , she might not be. But i just don`t think it`s normal for someone to loose so much weight , even her face had lost a lot of weight she just did not look well.

Getting a blowjob is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you will NOT be the first.

You need to understand that you CANNOT know a person's hiv status by looking at them. Would you be worried about this blowjob if she was fat and healthy looking? If you went out with a woman you met in a nightclub and she looked healthy, would you be tempted to have unprotected intercourse with her? I sure hope not. Hiv does NOT discriminate and neither should you.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER A NO-RISK BLOWJOB, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hi and thanks for the replyes.Sorry my spelling is not to good=) I will most likely do a full check up next month.I always use condoms for sexual intercourse , i just had oral sex several times without a condom.And since i did didn`t have girl friend in a wile i am not very sexually active atm=) and the few times that i am it`s so fast that i don`t think i even give time to STD`s to infect me, that is how quick i am. You can call me the one minute man =)I guess i was being paranlid maybe she just has an eating disorder like a lot of young girls today , or drugs =/I don`t really like to see working girls but has mans we reach a point in wich we need to have sex, can`t really go on to long without having sex.I know the risks of other STD`s can be greater then HIV even with a condom on.I try to inform my self has much has i can , i find this site very usefull and i have been reading the lesson and threads in the "Am i infected" forum.I also try not to speak to my doctors about my sexual life because every time i mention i saw a working girl they right away say i am at high risk and blah blah blah, to them it doesn`t even matter if i am using a condom.Last docot i saw told me condoms are not has effective has many people think against HIV transmission but good thing i do my own research and i know better.Seems like most docotrs enjoy scaring the crap out of people ,i know in europe HIV tests are extremely expensive so i can see a benefit there for the health department=)

Yes, unfortunately, all too often doctors bring their own personal prejudice into the examination room. You have every right to a yearly sexual health screen and you don't have to explain yourself to the doctor. If pressed for a reason why you want to be checked, just tell them "I'm a RESPONSIBLE, sexually active adult and I want to safeguard my health and the health of my partners". End of story. That's all they need to know.

Condoms have been proven to prevent hiv infection. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. I myself was in a serodiscordant relationship for over eight years. He's hiv negative to this day, because we used condoms. We didn't use anything for oral, either way.

There's no shame in going to sex workers, as long as you treat them with the respect you'd treat any other human being with. They're people too. Use condoms for intercourse with them or anybody else and you'll be just fine where hiv is concerned.

I'm also in Europe (UK) and as far as I'm aware, standard hiv antibody tests aren't really very expensive at all. Some of the tests used to monitor hiv infection are, but not the diagnostic tests.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

You did not have a risk for HIV, saliva is very good at destroying HIV, specific enzymes present in saliva mean HIV is not transmitted in saliva.

Saliva is a part of the body's natural defences against infection.

On December 17th Ann wrote:

"Getting a blowjob is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one person has ever been infected this way and you will NOT be the first"...Ann is one of our experts here I suggest you listen to the advise she had given you and move on.

Hi i saw few posts from Ann on cunnilingus and the risks.One says :"The fluid a woman produces when sexually excited comes from the Bartholin's glands, located on either side of the vaginal opening. I have yet to discover one shred of evidence (and believe me, I've looked) that shows this lubricating fluid to have any more hiv present than other bodily secretions such as saliva, sweat or tears. Saliva, sweat and tears are NOT infectious fluids. "

Someone keeps telling me there is no study to back up this he syas they are bases on conjecture( not sure what this means )

And the infos i got from CDC are confusing.Sorry for lot of posts just asking questiong to find out more.

Please re-read your thread. I've already told you about the serodiscordant studies where condoms were used for anal or vaginal intercourse but NO barrier for oral - any type of oral, including cunnilingus - and none of the negative partners became infected.

I also already told you that a responsible, sexually active adult gets tested at least once a year, so I don't understand why that article should scare you. As long as you're using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, there's no reason to think your routine hiv test will return with anything other than a negative result.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

I know i am not going to ask anymore=)It`s just difficult to find peace of mind with all thsi information there is =/ I am nto an expert and everything becomes confusing Where ever i look they always say the risk is low but it is possible , then they will say there is not enough data to confirm the risks of oral sex etc...And i can not even understand if they speaking of insertive or receptive oral sex.Then other say Oral sex is no risk of HIV infection it`s extremely confusing.I feel like im playing tennis but i am the ball =)I read the lesson on aidmed to but even there it says "Oral sex is not an efficient route of HIV transmission, but it can happen" Error on my part i missed this page on the lesson "http://www.poz.com/articles/348_2126.shtml" i did not have my glasses on could not see all the links lol

Look mate, it isn't that difficult. Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you'll avoid hiv infection. Yep, it's that simple. If you don't believe us, maybe you should just jack off on your own.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Just a quick question , am not worryed about oral sex or anything i got the point =)I saw on a newspaper that they sayd that Circumcission decreases the risk of HIV infection? Hmmm i tought it was the other way around this makes no sense is there any truth to this Ann?

Yes, research has shown that circumcision may help decrease hiv infection.

There are only a very few, very specific types of cells that hiv can latch onto and infect. These specific cell types are found in specific places.

One of these cell types is found on the inside of the foreskin - the bit that is hidden when the foreskin is resting in its natural state over the head of the penis.

A man with an intact foreskin is NOT at any additional risk for hiv infection during a blowjob. Getting a blowjob is NOT a risk, whether you're intact or cut.

It is UNPROTECTED anal or vaginal intercourse that is risky, whether a man is circumcised or not.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. If you are uncircumcised, make sure you pull the foreskin back when putting the condom on. Read more about correct condom use by clicking on the three condom and lube links in my signature line.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hi i have a few questions.I had Herpes on my lips since i was a kid but did not have any outbreaks of it in many years.Just recently i woke up in the morning and had a very strong itch on the shaft of my penis and few hours later this small bumb developed and another one under it.The first one went away and the second one was a little larger and had a crust wich kept coming off but it`s clearing now. Had some pain but nothing to bad at least not has bad has the one on my lips that i used to get.I believe that since i always had herpes since a kid i did not get a bug outbreak?Only thing i have this lump under my skin (on the penis) near the location of the second bumb and steel have some itching.Can this be Syphilis?Also is it true that if someone is HIV+ can have a false positive to Syphils or vice versa?

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hi Ann,Sorry i shouldn't of went into details on the bumps/blisters thingys.I will go and get it checked even tough they are almost gone and i know i should of done this before.Im just concerned because i saw some web sites saying that if one is HIV+ or vice versa has Syphilis it might give a false negative for either one?Any truth to this? Most likely i did not understand what i was reading.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hello,I recently had sex with a working girl and i used condoms for intercourse but did not use it for oral sex.I know that oral sex is not a problem but im scared because 2 days ago i woke up with a very bad sore throat and then later on in the day had a high fever (38.7) and since its may here and its like 30C outside im just worried , i don't think it's normal to have a fever liek that in the summer.I saw my doctor and he gave me some penicillin for my throat he thinks it's pharingites ( not sure i spelled it right ).

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

I found this video on you tube, it's pretty interesting and goes on to say what pretty much as being sayd on this boards 100000 time over and over It's with Richard Dawking a reputable scientists.I was just curious , since i have never heard of this before , it is true that there are people out there with a natural immunity to HIV?

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hi guys,I had a bad accident last night. I was having anal sex with a working girl and the condom broke. I must of been inside her for about 1 minute.I asked her about her status and she told me she is negative although she didn't seem to worried about the accident and when I confronted her about it she told me she will deal with it in her own time and she didn't want to freak me out. She also told me how she as kids and she swear on her kids head she is negative and would never do anything to arm someone else.I asked her to put me at peace if she can come and get tested with me and she agreed. She gave me her phone number and told me to call her this morning. I did call and she did answear and that put me a little at ease. We have an appointment on friday morning at the hassle clinic here for a quick HIV test.At this point I believe that either she is HIV- or she just doesn't know her status ( but she told me she gets checked twice every year and her last HIV test was 3 months ago). I don't even know this girl but she seems like an honest person to me.My main problem is with this idiots at this testing clinics. I went thru 8 calls before I found this clinic for friday. They kept telling me that since it happened last night I had to wait 12 weeks lol. I told the lady that I understand that the HIV window period is 12 weeks but at the moment I am not concerned about me giving her HIV but more her GIVING ME HIV. At this point she tells me well sir but the 12 weeks period is valid for her to, she will also have to wait 12 weeks. At this point I am like WTF?I was like " madam I perfectly understand that we must wait 12 weeks for me to get tested but I want to check what her current status is. She is a working girl she is been doing this for a long time what do you think are the chances of her contracting HIV 2 years , 5y, even 10 y ago compared to her contracting it in this last 12 weeks?"Does this make sense to you guys or I am just loosing my mind?I know that she could of contracted HIV in this last 12 weeks but just knowing that her status at the moment is HIV- that is at least a 75% relief for me.How can they even determine that the only way they test you is if you last sexual encounter was 12 weeks ago? How retarded is that.What if in this past 3 years I had unprotected sex do I need to base my HIV testing only on my last encounter lol?I am not basing my HIV status on her but if on friday she does indeed test negative for me that alone is a relief and give me peace wile waiting 3 weeks.If she knew she was HIV+ she would tell me and if she didn't want to say anything she certainly would not agree to come with me to get tested.

Sorry for this long post and my bad english I am just scared right now.I

No, I don't think PEP is warranted in this particular situation. We're talking about a single and very brief possible exposure. Until the condom broke you were protected. It is significantly harder to transmit HIV from female to male than the other way around. I must say that through the years and many, many such instances, we've never had anyone turn positive from the kind of condom break you have described.

The woman is right that it's a 12 weeks period for each of you. Even if she tests negative it doesn't give you the all clear you want because she could be very newly exposed and not yet seroconverted. I am not saying she is, only that could be so.

So you need your own negative test result. You can test initially if you want to at 6 weeks. A negative at that point would mean in all likelihood that you will test negative again at 12 weeks.

Although I appreciate your concern, I do expect you to come out of this ok.

Hi Andy and thanks for the help.I have to be honest with you guys otherwise there really is no point in this. It's been many years that I have engaged in sexual activities with prostitutes here in Canada I honestly don't even no the number.I know many people would think I am a pig and judge me wrong but they would have to know the extent of my situation to even come close to understand.I have suffered of OCD my all life but it got really bad around my 30's and it kept from living a regular life like everyone else and unable to have a companion. I have been single since 1994 I just don't want to share my life with anyone else since I would make them miserable.Because of this my only outlet for sexual activities was with working girls.I have always used condoms except for oral sex most of the times I did not.I believe I am a high risk category and maybe don't want to see the truth for fear?Maybe I have been lucky so far and need to use this experience to just stop.I do not put anyone at danger since I do not date and would not even do that for fear of putting someone else in a dangerous situation and I don't have any kids.I only sleep with working girls and they are aware of the risks they take plus I always use condoms except on this case that it broke.I am terrified to find out my status since in my situation I think a swift death would be the best way out of this living hell. Don't think I am suicidal or anything =) I am not planning on going just yet but I sometimes don't see the benefits of living a life like this.Anyways sorry for the long post just wanted to vent out since I have no one to speak with , except my father who is old and doesn't understand many things.

Well, as I said previously the likelihood of your having been infected from a single condom break is very remote. So I would hold off on doom scenarios since I expect you to test negative when you get tested.

It is a good idea in general for someone who is sexually active to have a full STD panel done regularly, which means at least once a year. Other STDs are much easier to acquire than HIV.

Your sex life is your own business. If you feel your going to sex workers is something that makes your life unmanageable then how about seeing a therapist or other professional to deal with that? Otherwise, as long as you are consistently using condoms you are behaving responsibily to your partners as well as protecting your own health. Which is what any responsbile adult needs to do.

Yesterday morning the girl came with me to get tested at the local clinic, they did a rapid test and came back negative.The social worker said that usually people seroconvert between 6 weeks and 12 weeks so the chances of her being infected in this time are much more slim.She also told me she didn't do anything to put her at risk and I believe her since she was honest with me from the beginning. Strange how sometimes you can trust a SW that you don't know more then a friend that I have known my all life.I will get tested again at 3 months and same with her.But knowing that she did not lie to me about her status and that she was tested every 6 months put me a little at ease.

Hi sorry to bother again but I keep reading misleading facts on oral sex risks and it's getting me worried.Found this thread on the Body http://www.thebody.com/Forums/AIDS/SafeSex/Q214367.htmlThis part gets me goign a little " Regarding HIV testing, for guys who generally try to play safe but have unprotected oral sex with multiple partners, I recommend routine HIV-antibody testing every 6 to 12 months. " he also says "Generally, the use of a physical barrier during oral sex can reduce the risk of transmission of HIV and other STDs. A latex or plastic condom may be used on the penis to reduce the risk of oral-penile transmission. If your partner is a female, a cut-open condom or a dental dam can be used between your mouth and the vagina. Similarly, regardless of the sex of your partner, if your mouth will come in contact with your partner's anus, a cut-open condom or dental dam can be used between your mouth and the anus. "A latex or plastic condom may be used to reduce the risk? this makes no sense to me. If without condom the risk is already small why even use the word reduce if you are using condoms? with condoms oral sex should be 0 risk.

I had unprotected oral sex many times and little scared.My doc found molluscum contagiosum on my penis 3 small bumbs and I have seen an article that said it's more common in children or people with immune problems.

Then of course i find stupid posts liek this that make me want to ripp my hairs out

"I read the post from earlier today from the man that wrote he got HIV from Oral Sex. Will you and the "experts" now retract your assurances that Oral Sex is a low to no risk exposure and take a more strident stance that Oral Sex is a significant risk. I am another example. I believe that I as a man was exposed as a result of receiving oral sex from a man. I haven't been tested yet but the symptoms I have are very indicative of HIV. I wish you would take a sterner stance and warm people of the great dangers of Oral Sex. There are probably hundreds if not thousands of us out here that have contracted HIV from Oral Sex. Your thoughts please. "He has not tested by he contracted HIV how stupid.

Trust me, those posts make me want to rip out hair as well. But that level of antagonism comes with the territory. People who abandon rational thought have nothing left but emotion. And as Andy says, feelings are not facts.

Logged

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

While oral isn't a risk for hiv infection, you can still get other STIs through oral, such as herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia and syphilis. These STIs can be transmitted from the giver to the receiver as well as the other way around. They can be present with no obvious symptoms, which is why we always recommend a FULL sexual health check-up at least once a year, or more often if you're very active and/or have several sexual partners.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts