Through holiday fund, Family Services, teen gets chance at college

Even after their kids turn 18, many parents boost them over the costly hurtles to independence, helping with expenses like the rental deposit on a first apartment or a new suit for a job interview.

But some young adults can't turn to their parents. Twenty-one-year old Kaleema "Jasmine" Dicks hasn't relied on her parents since she was 9, when she left their Plainfield home for foster care.

John O'Boyle/The Star-LedgerPortrait of Montclair State University student, 21-year-old Kaleema Jasmine Dicks.
"It was a bittersweet kind of feeling," said Jasmine, the fifth of 12 children, saying both her parents were addicted to drugs. "I was kind of happy to leave "I was tired of all that abuse...but I was sad because that was my only family. I never knew anybody besides them."

Over the next 11 years, Jasmine would live with five foster families, and spend several unpleasant months in a group home.

"That was the worst experience of my life.…I honestly feel like it was a jail," said Jasmine.

Although they were better than the group home, Jasmine was often unhappy with her foster families. One woman gave her biological daughter privileges she denied to Jasmine. Another said racist things, "like black people should be neutered," and a third was very strict, Jasmine recalled.

Finally, four years ago, Jasmine found a good fit with a family in Englewood.

"They taught me how to be good people -- never stop giving, never stop lending a hand, never stop helping," she said. "Even if I wasn't a foster child, they would still take me into their home."

School presented another kind of difficulty, however. Her mother had delayed enrolling her in to kindergarten, so Jasmine was two years older than her classmates -- and until high school, much taller.

"I would get picked on a lot," she said. "I never wanted to tell my age, because it was just embarrassing. "Everyone would think 'Jasmine is two years behind,'" she said. "They would think I was stupid."

But she wasn't. "I wasn't a wild child. I didn't want to run the streets," Jasmine said. She said she strove to make the honor roll, and got involved with her foster mother's church.

The hard work paid off two years ago when Jasmine was accepted at Montclair State University. She is currently majoring in family and child studies with a concentration in social work.

"I was in foster care for 10, 11 years. I had the opportunity to work with a lot of social workers, and I like what they do," Jasmine said.

But college comes with its own challenges -- including steep expenses. These can be overwhelming, especially for a young person who grew up in foster care, said Liz Mason, a senior vice president at Children's Aid and Family Services, a Paramus-based nonprofit organization offering diverse human services and child welfare programs.

For "teenagers who are aging out of foster care, they have a whole host of support service around them, then suddenly, that disappears," Mason said. "It's a very scary time for them, a very vulnerable time for them."

To help meet their needs, the group developed the Thomas R.S. Burgin Parents Fund, which provides financial assistance to teens aging out of foster care.

Through the program, which is supported by the Greater Newark Holiday Fund, Jasmine receives an substantial annual stipend she can use to cover living expenses. Mason said the Parent Fund also provides care packages with necessities for a dorm room, and even emergency assistance for things like car repairs, a rent check or counseling -- the kind of help other young people might expect from their families.

"If they're given that extra connection, if somebody is at the end of the phone when they pick up, then we can stop them from making very bad decisions to get cash when they need it," Mason said.

Although Jasmine said her first semester was difficult, she is enjoying college now.

"It's really been a turning point in my life," she said.

Although she looks forward to one day having her own apartment, today Jasmine likes living with a roommate, and is embraced by her foster family when she returns to their home over school breaks.

"It's always good to have a place to go home to," she said.

For more information on the Greater Newark Holiday Fund, or information on how to donate, call 1-866-292-HOPE (4673) or visit holidayfund.org.