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Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Neptune's Girlfriend

Neptune dumps his first wife (a mermaid),Too embarrassed to admit that, in fifteen years, he never made it past second base.

At the bottom of the sea, there is every kind of wreck,But Neptune finally rouses himself."I am the earth-shaker!" he crows,But under water, everything is muted, and it just sounds like "I abda flug glug!"

Complete change is what Neptune wants, and so he hooks up with the Iowa Corn Queen.She meets him at the door, dressed in provocative costume,Purring, "Shuck me, baby!"But Neptune is still dissatisfied.He wants her to get a boob job.

Things don't work out,And it's just as well that Nep isn't around to hear what the Iowa Corn Queen and her new lover say about him.The new lover declares, with certainty,"He's a moron! They're perfect!"Then demonstrates that she really thinks so.

"What should I do with this stupid sea shell?" the Iowa Corn Queen asks, later.Her girlfriend advises throwing it in the ocean.They do, after using a Sharpie to write "U R A FLUG GLUG!" on it.They hope it hits him in the head._____

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“I'd rather sing one wild song and burst my heart with it, than live a thousand years watching my digestion and being afraid of the wet.” ― Jack London, The Turtles of Tasman

"The only calibration that counts is how much heart people invest, how much they ignore their fears of being hurt or caught out or humiliated. And the only thing people regret is that they didn't live boldly enough, that they didn't invest enough heart, didn't love enough. Nothing else really counts at all." — Ted Hughes

Poetry made from...

...trinkets, mojo, and double mocha latte!

Welcome to the Word Garden

The Word Garden consists of original poems written by me, Shay a.k.a. Fireblossom. Please stop a while and enjoy them. But don't pick the blooms that you find here, they must not be planted elsewhere without permission of the author.