Monthly Archives: June 2016

Lindsay Aerts, a radio personality who currently hosts a show for moms on KSL radio, organizes the annual Climb Out of Darkness event in Salt Lake City. The event raises awareness for postpartum mood/mental disorders that include OCD, PTSD, anxiety, depression and more.

I had to heal my own postpartum depression (and still have “blue” days), so this story is very near and dear to my heart. So many women struggle with this yet never ask for help because of the social stigma of mental symptoms. There is also a societal pressure to “snap out of it” or “that’s just motherhood” but Lindsay, who dealt with Postpartum Anxiety, says, “motherhood is hard, but it shouldn’t be suffering.”

That’s why Lindsay is featured in today’s #15secondzen. She aims to help all moms manage their moods with this one simple tip.

Now that I’m on the mindfulness path, I still have plenty of negative thoughts, but, on good days, I can usually give pause before internalizing or reacting, then I can reframe the thought into one that makes ME feel better. Because whether the low-vibe thought is justified or not, it makes me feel yucky and I would rather feel peaceful and happy than be right, or protect my ego, or justify my stress and over-doing. (Remember, this is on a good day.)

Here are some phrases that I have successful re-spun to work better for me:

1.

Self-talk: I’m sick / injured / depressed / exhausted.

Affirmation: I now have the opportunity to take care of myself.

How often do we get the opportunity to specifically send healing energy to a particular part of our physical/emotional body? Also, these ailments help our productivity-driven minds justify lying down with an ice pack, or spending all day lounging, or even just taking an Epsom salt bath. Emotional sickness might justify a visit to the therapist where we can finally resolve that childhood issue or relationship riddle. From someone who has dealt with all the aforementioned, this affirmation has made a huge positive impact in my daily life.

2.

Self-talk: I deserve ______.

Affirmation: I am worthy of ______.

In a society where the fewer the calories, the better, it seems very progressive to say something like “I deserve this ice cream today.” It insinuates self-care. But it also almost always encourages execution, and usually, immediately. Say you are trying to give up sugar and then, on a very hot day after you’ve completed all your duties, you might say, “I deserve this” and dive right into the sugary treat. No consciousness needed! Now, if you say, “I am worthy of ice cream,” you acknowledge that you may have some if you wish, and that enjoying it wouldn’t harm your self-esteem, but you are in control and do not have to indulge because you “deserve it.” Does that make sense? This has empowered me and also drastically improved my relationship. I used to think, “I deserve someone who takes me on dates.” It made me feel entitled and did not produce positive communication. Now, I think, “I am worthy of being taken out.” Saying that allows me to give love to MYSELF, instead of depending on him for everything. Saying it that way also reminds me that I can practice self-care, and do something for myself.

3.

Self-talk: How could he/she do that to me?!

Affirmation: I don’t know what suffering he/she is experiencing to influence their behavior/words/etc.

I used to take everything so personally. Any perceived questioning of my ego or ethics. When my husband would let household tasks or financial matter slip through the cracks. But Tibetan Buddhists say compassion is the no. 1 element to a life free of suffering, and that means empathizing with what our “attackers” are going through. And Their “stuff” is never about us, anyway. Even if it is directly attacking us or our life/work/family, it’s about them and their fears and ego and how maybe what you did makes them look bad or something. My best friend went out with her friends and flirted with a guy another friend simply thought was cute. The next day, the jealous friend sent my friend a text saying, “I had to clear your name with that guy. He thought you were just out looking for a one night stand. I told him otherwise.”

That’s a biting dig that could have had my friend questioning how people view her and perhaps incurring embarrassment or self-hate. But my friend knew that wasn’t true and simply texted: “thanks for having my back, boo.”

It’s not easy to stop your ego from getting involved, but if you retrain your brain to give pause after an “attack” or Injustice, you’ll feel more peaceful giving them the benefit of the doubt, and not having to take on THEIR stuff.

4.

Self-talk: I don’t have time.

Affirmation: I have no wasted minutes.

Stephen covey said, “don’t prioritize your to-do list. Schedule your priorities.” Start to say no until you have breathing room. But also, start NOW by using the few minutes you do have to lie down, read a few pages of a book, snuggle a dog, etc. you don’t “just have 5 minutes,” you have “5 whole minutes!”

5.

Self-talk: that’s not fair.

Affirmation: I can use my unique voice to influence change. // or // The timing for everything is perfect.

I feel this way as a woman, and as a friend to minority groups who are the target of hatred. I get discouraged a lot. But being in a gender group that is still unequal gives me the opportunity to speak up about my unique struggle. I mean, that can only influence change eventually, right?

On another level, we say “that’s not fair” about everything from not getting a promotion to being helped second when you were there first. So when we say something like, “the timing of everything is perfect,” it detaches you from taking it personally and allows you to see that there is a bigger picture, thusly this event doesn’t matter so much.

**

these small changes allow me to stop reacting to inflammatory thoughts that made me feel stressed or sad or angry or combative, and instead make my thoughts work for ME. after all, that’s the most important person in your life. 🙂

Sugagreen Hub is a community space in Salt Lake City, UT where the people who live on-site or come for the gardening workshops contribute to a DIY, sustainable environment.

The property is beautiful; twinkling lights, footpaths and grapevine-shaded chicken coops give Sugagreen it’s aesthetic appeal, while the permaculture (agriculture that’s good for the earth and mostly off the grid) is the motor that runs this self-“oiled” machine.

Caretaker and certified permaculture designer, Adriane Hovey and her mentor James Loomis, the gardening expert for Catalyst Magazine, built the aquaponics element to the urban farm. Aquaculture doesn’t need land, which is helpful to the Earth because of all of the soil erosion, and is self-contained ecosystem that produces plants. The symbiotic relationship between fish and plants is what makes this method intriguing. Here’s how it works:

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​Hovey says their chickens are a big part of their permaculture. Rather than traditional composting, she says she will throw food scraps and eggshells onto the earth where the chickens roam. She says the chickens peck and scratch and naturally grind the scraps into the dirt, which, along with their fertilizer, creates rich soil that she uses to feed and grow her plants. She also uses the ground eggshells to make facial spa masks, chalk, and to naturally repel snails and other bugs from climbing up plants and bending them over (The shells scrape their sensitive bodies).

But unless the snails are climbing on the plants, Hovey says they and many other bugs are actually good for the garden. The soil microbiology loves the snail trails. Ladybugs are also important players, because these vicious predators eat The small bugs that lay eggs in and eat your plants. She says it’s important not to use pesticide, even organic pesticide, because you want a healthy ecosystem of insects to Feed and protect your garden.

Hovey also said it’s important to use the lasagna mulch method when you’re preparing a planting bed to enrich the soil and prevent weeds. You can learn how to do that, plus everything you read here and more in one of their community workshops. You can find out when those are happening on their Facebook page.

The people who make Sugagreen a Hub add their talents to make this green space a place of true community. For example, Rocky Lavoie contributes her musical talents on the ground’s stage, made of all Upcycled material, and also teaches yoga once a week in the space’s studio.​​​ and Artists for Agriculture help design garden elements and hang art for sale on the walls. Everyone is welcome, so contact Hobey through Facebook if you’d like to get involved, or even rent their studio space.

💔 my heart is broken after learning that a man who is sick with anger and hatred took precious lives, sending a message of intolerance towards people who are LGBTQ. I mourn with you, orlando. I am also staying with my anger and allowing it to come and go without reacting to it. Because the last thing this country needs is more anger and hatred. compassion and unconditional love would have prevented this horrific event in the first place. We have the power to put that out there NOW. In the name of inclusion and equality, we can let LOVE WIN instead of hatred. Sending so much positive energy and comfort to your hearts, and also choosing to act compassionately to be part of the solution. 💜💙💚💛

Hilary Clinton just became one of the very few woman ever nominated for President of the United States. It gives me goosebumps, when you think how many men have been nominated compared to women. (Check out this inspiring article on past female candidates.) I was rooting for Bernie until I felt a very strong physical/emotional reaction to her message upon her nomination, and it made me remember what we as women so desperately need in our government:

– childcare: women will be liberated when we can have subsidized or free childcare to pursue education, civic duties/involvement, professions and simply self-care

-equal pay: still a disparity, even 40 years after Women’s Lib

-overcoming racial barriers: women of color are worthy of the same opportunities afforded to not just men, but white women, as well.

-reproductive rights: not having say over our own bodies while men have every bit of say over theirs is a violation of basic human rights. We should not be punished for something we did not choose; being born with the possibility to have children. Not to mention the very young girls or those in poverty not having access to abortion…who will not have free childcare to finish their education/professional endeavors.

What issues are on your mind? If you are a woman or a friend of women, I ask you to consider your basic human rights during this very historic election season.

People who have an issue with those identifying as LGBTQ have been trained to be this way by society. ☝🏾We have told boys that expressing their 😖emotions and liking 🎀”feminine” things is WRONG and that boys who stick up for the “girly” boys will be punished. Same with females. a young girl who dresses as or likes ☠”boy” things could be called a “man” or “not like us” and excluded from the group, and anyone associated with her will also be excluded. This is how we’ve set up our society, so is it any wonder that equality – even as much as it’s spreading now – is so hard to make the NORM? 🙀Even if you are scared of being alienated by your social group…..if you are experiencing ANY resistance to equality, I ask that you go against your gender-oppressive upbringing and embrace the differences, and similarities, we all share. 👭💁🏽👶🏻Human is human, no matter what adornments, personalities or sexual orientation we express. Free yourself 🇺🇸