Author
Topic: I sent a thank you note...... (Read 3104 times)

Longer story:I was recently bridesmaid in my bff's wedding. After the wedding I sent TY notes to the bride's parents, her serp-father then sent me a Thank you for the letter message on FB, reiterating an offer to for myself and my family to visit for a holiday (they live in a lovely coastal area). I feel like I should reply, but really don't know what to say without getting into thank you for the thank you spiral.

In other news: I'm thinking about giving up thank you notes: last rearm I got hugged by teachers after writing them a ty note when my son left nursery, its getting bizzare!

What was your thank you note to the bride's parents about? Did you stay overnight at their house for the wedding?

In any case, your note back to the parents won't be another thank you. You will just be responding to the stepfather mentioning an upcoming visit. Even if you say something like "thank you for offering" somewhere in there, there won't be any reason for him to send you a thank you note back. So, you won't be continuing a spiral.

I'm not sure what you mean by it being bizarre that your son's teachers hugged you after giving them a thank you note. If it's that it made you uncomfortable, I wouldn't let that stop you from sending thank you notes to other people.

ETA: I saw your response that was made as I was posting. I'm not sure if it's common for people to send thank you notes to the bride's parents for hosting the wedding, so I think the stepfather may have felt it was proper to reply as if it were any other type of letter.

ETA: I saw your response that was made as I was posting. I'm not sure if it's common for people to send thank you notes to the bride's parents for hosting the wedding, so I think the stepfather may have felt it was proper to reply as if it were any other type of letter.

When my sister got married a couple of people sent thank you notes to my parents since they hosted. Only two or three I think (out of about 160) so I think it's rare but it does happen.

I sympathize with you, OP, on the being hugged because it's as if you've done some grand gesture when all you'd done is write a thank you note. I'd be upset if people I had no established physical relationship with were trying to touch me after I'd sent them a polite thank you. I wouldn't let it put you off thank you notes but maybe you could come up with a way to establish personal boundaries when you see someone coming to hug you. Pulling back and sticking out a hand to shake instead is a good one. Just saying, "I don't hug," should be enough if said with an smile and an offer of a handshake.

Longer story:I was recently bridesmaid in my bff's wedding. After the wedding I sent TY notes to the bride's parents, her serp-father then sent me a Thank you for the letter message on FB, reiterating an offer to for myself and my family to visit for a holiday (they live in a lovely coastal area). I feel like I should reply, but really don't know what to say without getting into thank you for the thank you spiral.

In other news: I'm thinking about giving up thank you notes: last rearm I got hugged by teachers after writing them a ty note when my son left nursery, its getting bizzare!

On the FB message, I'd just reply "If we make plans to visit,we'll let you know" or if they are offering to allow you to stay with them "It's kind of you to offer to allow us to stay. I'll be in touch if it looks like we would be able to visit within the year."

For the hug from nursery, many caregivers feel very comfortable with the parents because they are very physical with the parent's children. Also, they spend all day giving hugs and kisses and physically interacting with the kids. So a hug of "Thanks for the note recognizing our contribution and we've loved getting to know you and your child" wouldn't seem off to me.