Research Shows Connection

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way Out Victim Assistance ProgramA Ministry of Citizens for Community Values of Memphis

Cybersexual addiction is a sub-type of Pathological Internet Use (PIU), a term coined by Dr. Kimberly Young, Psy.D, who is considered to be an authority in the field of internet addiction. In 1997, Dr. Young, presented a paper to the American Psychological Association (APA) reporting the results of her study of 396 people who where PIU affected. With the presentation of her paper the APA classified excessive Internet use as addictive, in the same way that drugs (including alcohol), gambling, video games, and some types of eating disorders are considered addictive.

Dr. Young found that 90% who became addicted to the Internet became addicted to the two-way communication functions: chat rooms, Multi-User Dungeons, newsgroups, and email. She reported that one surprise result was the addicted population were not computer savvy individuals but actually held low-tech jobs. Only 8% of the participants in this study came from high-tech jobs while 42 % indicated they had no permanent job and 39% held low-tech jobs.

A major finding was that the attraction of the Internet revolved around its perceived anonymity, which provides a comfort zone for people to act out in ways they would never consider in real life. Dr. Young is quoted in an article by Evan Schuman in TechWire, “One can easily become involved in the lives of others almost like watching a soap opera and thinking of the characters as real people.”

The ability to remain anonymous, the freedom to invent your own reality, and the chemical changes that take place in one’s body when viewing pornography makes one vulnerable to turning to the Internet to fulfill his or her sexual desires and fantasies, and it has the potential of turning curious seekers into on-line pornography and/or cybersex addicts. It is easy to enter cyberspace porn sites as your imaginary self and live out your fantasies to the fullest, but it is impossible to keep the body’s biological responses to pornography from occurring. Research shows biochemical and neurological responses in individuals who are emotionally aroused, regardless of the stimuli. The adrenal hormone epinephrine is released into the brain, explaining why one can remember pornographic images seen years before. Chemicals called opioids are released by nerve endings in response to pleasure, and then reinforce the body’s own desire to repeat the process (J. L. McGaugh, “Preserving the Presence of the Past” American Psychologist, p. 161).

The reason cybersex is so addictive boils down to accessibility, control, and excitement. Sex on line is available in more than 70,000 sex-related Internet sites. This makes it easy to fall into an obsessive pattern of Internet use for sexual gratification. One can develop a sense of being in complete control of their world with no checks and balances as to what they say or do. With no one to see them a curious person can enter any of thousands of dominance and submission rooms, fetish rooms or bisexual rooms. This uncensored buffet allows one to pick and choose anything they feel they want. The emotional rush supports the illusion that others appreciate the addict’s sexuality. Research supports the assumption that sex is a function of the mind, not just the body.

The reason cybersex is so addictive boils down to accessibility, control, and excitement. Sex on line is available in more than 70,000 sex-related Internet sites. This makes it easy to fall into an obsessive pattern of Internet use for sexual gratification. One can develop a sense of being in complete control of their world with no checks and balances as to what they say or do. With no one to see them a curious person can enter any of thousands of dominance and submission rooms, fetish rooms or bisexual rooms. This uncensored buffet allows one to pick and choose anything they feel they want. The emotional rush supports the illusion that others appreciate the addict’s sexuality. Research supports the assumption that sex is a function of the mind, not just the body.

Indulging one’s self with cybersex is not a harmless pastime as the “Adult Entertainment Business” would like one to believe. M. Douglas Reed, author of Pornography Addiction in Media, Children, and the Family writes, “The use of sexual media is clearly associated with sexually aggressive behavior…Some believe that it facilitates, maintains, or reinforces it… Mr. Reed cites pornography that is arousing coupled with physical sexual activity and fantasies and pornographic stimuli as catalysts for promoting sexually aggressive behavior, especially if exposure occurs during puberty and the 10 to 24 months afterwards because this is an important time period in the formation of one’s sexuality. Also, statistics show that hard-core pornography is directly related to the skyrocketing rape rate. In the United States rape has increased 500% since 1960.

According to calls being received at Citizens for Community Values, the problem of Internet porn and cybersex is growing in families across the board, churched and unchurched. Marriages are being destroyed and incest and abuse rates are growing. It is imperative that we become informed of this growing social problem that has the potential to affect each and every one of us to varying degrees. There are warning signs that signal the need for help everyone should know and take seriously.

The Warning Signs of Cybersexual Addiction

Regularly spending long periods of time in chat rooms and private messaging with the sole purpose of finding Cybersex.

Preoccupation with using the net to find on-line sexual partners.

Frequently using anonymous communication to act our sexual fantasies that are not typically carried out in real life.

Anticipation of the next on-line session with the expectation of finding sexual arousal or gratification.

Frequently moving from Cybersex to phone sex, or even meetings in person.

Hiding on-line activities and interactions from a significant other, including sneaking on-line when spouse or family members are not a home, with a sense of relief.

Feeling guilt or shame from these interactions.

After accidentally being aroused by Cybersex at first, now actively seeking it out after logging on line.

Masturbation while engage in erotic chat on-line.

Preferring Cybersex as a primary form of sexual gratification (investing less time with a real-life sexual partner).

Citizens for Community Values of Memphis was born out of a mandate to help educate the public about the harms of all avenues used by the adult entertainment industry which cause harm to children and families. In keeping with that mission CCV is one of the sponsors of the seminar “The Wolf at Your Door (Internet Pornography Stalks the Family) to be held on February 26, 2006, at Second Presbyterian Church. If you would like more information call our office at 685-1493.

Greatness Is Serving

Greatness Is Serving

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim AssistanceCitizens for Community Values

In Matthew 20:26-28, Jesus contrasts how the Gentile’s view of greatness with His own. He says, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not be so among you: but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”

This same message is woven throughout Scripture; we are called to be servants. It is also very clear that Jesus came to serve those trapped in undesirable lifestyles. Citizens for Community Values Victim Assistance Program’s mandate is to do just that, help young women leave the undesirable lifestyle of topless dancing and meet the One who can change their lives permanently.

As the Director of Victim Assistance I have a burning desire for Christians to know the truth about how the enemy is working through topless clubs, escort services, massage parlors, and porn vendors in video stores, bookstores, and via the internet to entrap and devour real flesh and blood human beings like a spider entraps a fly and then has it for dinner. Only the spider is much more civil in its approach to killing its victim. Victims of the porn and sex industry aren’t devoured quickly. They, for many and different and desperate reasons, step into a perpetual slow death that starts inside their soul and encompasses their minds, their spirits and finally their physical bodies. The cycle is complete and the haunting emptiness is reflected in the mirror of the soul, their eyes. They only know survival—life has passed the by.

Some may say that these women deserve what they get because they choose to do what they do. Granted consequences to the choices we make are inevitable and often just, but I for one am so grateful for God’s grace in my life. Constantly He has poured out love and grace and truthfully I have never deserved it. Therefore, I am called to offer that same love and grace to others even at times when they don’t necessarily deserve it. The joy of allowing Christ to love others through us is available to anyone who has the heart to serve as Jesus served.

Here is what one young women wrote as she shared her heart about the ordinary people involved with CCV as mentors.

"It’s me! I’ve been thinking of you a lot. CCV has changed my whole life. And, I have no idea how to repay you all. I’m out of the INDUSTRY! And I’m staying out. I was very lost after I found out I was pregnant. You helped me find a doctor, when I didn’t have one. A comfortable ,stable home, when I didn’t have one. You helped keep my car running, when it was down. You helped bring back my self-esteem, when it was gone. You also taught me how to dress my baby, when I was afraid that I wouldn’t do it right. So, NOW, I have a very good job, confidence, self-love and worth, a beautiful healthy child, and YOU on my side. And you actually got me wanting God in my life. You, also, taught me about lobbying. I didn’t think I would be interested in doing THAT! I realized that I could do so much more. I can make a big difference. Thank you for putting me back on the right road. I will always be beside you, willing to do almost anything you ask of me. Thank you, to me is not enough…. "

We have four young women at the present time who want to come into our program but can’t because we don’t have mentors for them. This is heartbreaking because when they finally get the courage to say enough is enough and reach out for help it is imperative to offer immediate help. We are convinced that the most important thing we can offer a woman is a Godly woman to mentor her and point her to Christ because apart from Him there is no permanent healing and change.

If you have been looking for an opportunity to serve as Jesus served by reaching out in grace to those who are broken and hurting. Your search is over! Call me, Carol Wiley at 685-1493 or email me at carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Porn Industry Thrives

Porn Industry Thrives While America’s Economy Suffers

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim Assistance

September 11, 2001 is a day that is engraved on the minds and hearts of America. The enemy struck quickly and without warning killing or injuring close to seven thousand people. All who watched as New York and Washington were under siege experienced shock, heartbreak and fear. The personal impact of the barbaric act of attacking us in our own backyard and killing and maiming our friends and neighbors has affected all who live in this country and cherish the precious freedom and prosperity it offers. Also, the looming threat of biological warfare has resurfaced and the decline in America’s economy has accelerated.

Our economy was dipping before the fatal hits, but now it is in a nose-dive and people are talking recession as the government moves to help keep our commercial planes in the air and other major companies and industries are suffering financially. With all the talk of layoffs, unemployment, and falling stocks an amazing fact was brought to our attention at CCV. The one industry that is flourishing is the pornography industry. It was reported by Family News on WCRV Radio that when the owner of Rick’s Cabarets located in the Houston area was interviewed he reported that his business has not suffered at all. He stated that in 2000 his net profits were $180,000 and in the first nine months of 2001 he netted over $1,000,000. His businesses include several topless clubs and several adult websites. He stated that since September 11th he has had no decrease in his business.

Another report we received was that on the internet for three days after the attack on America the most visited websites were those with information about Bin Laden with sex-oriented sites dropping to number two. On the fourth day sex sites regained their number one rating.

In due time more stats will be forthcoming, but these two were enough to convince Citizens for Community Values that we were under siege before September 11th by an enemy that is destroying thousands and thousands of our fellow Americans on a consistent basis. The pornographers are subtle, silent, seductive killers that have no boundaries, no regard for human life, and no more scruples than the terrorists. They have been successfully involved in germ warfare for years and the disease is spreading while most Americans live oblivious to the attack until it strikes at home.

The patriotism that has resurrected since the destruction at the WTC and the Pentagon is long overdue as is the emphasis on God and prayer. Not many Americans are complacent at this point about the need to fight for the safety of our homeland. My prayer is that we will get just as serious about fighting for the safety of our children and families’ mental, emotional, and spiritual health by taking just as strong a stand against the pornography industry and its germ warfare.

New Name — New Life

A New Name — A New Life — A Dire Need

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim AssistanceCitizens for Community Values of Memphis

The Victim Assistance Program sponsored by Citizens for Community Values now goes under the name, A WAY OUT. The program will continue to operate under the umbrella of Citizens for Community Values of Memphis and its board of directors. The ministry focus will remain helping victims to recover from the harms of pornography and the sex-oriented businesses. A Way Out Victim Assistance Program sponsored by CCV has been providing a way out for these victims for about seven years now and has to date assisted 55 victims leave the world of topless dancing and escort services. Of these 55 victims, only 3 have returned to topless dancing as their career. The others have made or are in the process of making the transition from the subculture of the sex-oriented businesses and are now integrated into society pursuing other professions, managing homes and marriages, as well as seeking to grow in their faith. In most cases one would never suspect they had ever been a part of the “music of the night.”

One of our graduates actually has a career as a ballroom dance instructor with Arthur Murray Dance Studio. Her dream was to be a dance instructor and to compete in Ballroom Dance Showcases. She came to “A Way Out” in 1994, a young dancer who was pregnant, broke, afraid, and not knowing how she would survive. She was given the immediate help she needed which included housing, pregnancy care, financial support, and job skill training and she was sent for ongoing counseling. She was mentored and surrounded by a loving support system and was faithful to attend her counseling sessions. After giving birth to a beautiful baby boy, she worked in an office to help provide for her new baby. She never gave up her dream of ballroom dancing.

In 1998 “A Way Out” paid for her to attend Dance Vision Camp in Las Vegas. While at camp she was discovered by the current American Rhythm Champions, Bob Powers and Julia Gorchakova. They recommended her to Bill Wynn, Arthur Murray Franchisee, who offered her an instructing position a few weeks after she returned to Memphis from camp. She has been instructing since September 1999, and placed 4th in her very first professional competition. She recently transferred to the Manchester Studio to be closer to her home so she could spend more time with her son, now six years old.

This precious young woman returned to Memphis this month and put together a Ballroom Showcase which was held in the gym at Christ Methodist Church. She invited everyone who had supplied support and encouragement for her in her path from dancing in the dark to living and dancing in the light. She is not only a talented dancer, but she is an excellent mother, friend, and growing Christian.

A Way Out desires to help any victim who wants to see God’s love and grace change their lives. We are in dire need of Godly women to help mentor and work in varying degrees with those desiring a changed life. Call Carol Wiley at 685-1493 or email carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Experiencing God

Experiencing God’s Heart

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way OutCitizens for Community Values’ Victim Assistance Program

Most of the clientele who seek help from “A Way Out” are employed in topless clubs, but a few months ago the Lord literally dropped a precious young woman in our lap, challenging us with an opportunity to expand our ministry to victims who work in other sex-oriented businesses.

This young woman, who will remain anonymous, is nineteen years old; she was homeless and working on the streets to make money to eat. She shared that she had been in trouble and a ward of the state or on the streets since she was twelve years old. This was disturbing enough, but as her saga unfolded it became more and more evident that she was terribly neglected as a child. It started when her mother, a drug addict, abandoned her at birth. She was dropped off at her grandmother and great grandmother’s home. Her grandfather lived close by.

She remembers her grandmother and great-grandmother fondly stating that they tried to raise her and love her, but they were old and sick and very poor. The great grandmother died when this girl was twelve and the grandmother died when she was fifteen. She carries a dark horrifying memory of her grandfather sexually abusing her from age eight until age fifteen. To add to this, her physically abusive father was in and out of her life. She remembers him yelling and even beating her with a bullwhip when she was only eight years old.

She summarizes her story this way, “It was going pretty good till about eight, then it felt like it was all just took away from me. I didn’t have no childhood. At twelve I grew up before my time. I was in and out of trouble since great-grandmamma died.”

It didn’t take long for us to know we could not turn this wounded young girl away. The woman who first met her became her mentor and helped her get into the Salvation Army. The mentor picked up her new friend daily and brought her to our office where another volunteer began to tutor her while she was waiting to get into Job Corps. Her mentor, now affectionately know as “mama”, took her into her home for a few weeks before the opening at Job Corps became available. Using our victim assistance funds we were able to help her with food, clothing, medical needs, and attorney fees. We also sent her to a psychologist for assessment.

For the first time in her nineteen years this girl experienced God’s heart of love for her through a healthy support system. “Sing to God, sing praise to his name, extol him who rides on the clouds—his name is the Lord—and rejoice before him. A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families; he leads forth the prisoners with singing…” (Psalm 68: 4-6)

This precious young lady is still is absorbing all the love and hugs her new family and support system wants to give. A Way Out has never had a victim who is more compliant and appreciative. Her eyes light up and her whole countenance shines each time she accomplishes another step toward putting her life on the right track.

She is now at Job Corps in a two-year program. Her goal is to get her GED and train as she says “for a career not a job.” I know God is smiling as He watches her experience more and more of his love. She has been a Christian about three months now.

As the Christmas and the New Year are approaching we would love for many to experience the joy of sharing Christ’s love with the hurting. If you are interested call Carol at 685-1493 or email her at carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Ex-Dancer's Plea

An Ex-Dancer's Plea

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way Out Victim Assistance Program

Circumstances of life always present opportunities to trust God or to take matters into our own hands by trying to make our world work apart from God. Traumatic events such as physical, sexual, emotional, and spiritual abuse or abandonment program the victims make unhealthy choices based on the futility of their own minds and the deceitfulness of their own hearts. (Jeremiah 17:9) They become predisposed to believe the lies of the world (money and fame is the cure), the flesh (relationship at all costs is the cure), and the devil (God is your enemy and perpetrator). Lifestyle changes start when a person predisposed to make life choices based on lies is confronted with God’s love and truth. Here is one dancer’s story and challenge.

"I was introduced to the topless club by a friend who had been dancing for six months. I needed money for rent, food, my utility and phone bill, so I thought, Why not?” My friend told me how much money she made and sure enough, I made $600.00 the first night I danced. Needless to say, I got “Hooked”. I was making $400.00 to $600.00 a night. ”It gave me a false sense of security because I got so much attention. I made friends, a term I’ll use lightly. We went out to regular dance clubs and shopping to buy expensive furniture, clothes and jewelry. Sounds like a great job doesn’t it?

“Well, it wasn’t. While I had all the money to have the “nice things in life”, the price I paid with what dancing was doing to my mind was much higher. That’s why almost every dancer feels she has to take drugs or use alcohol to go up on stage. It got harder and harder for me to go to work, but I kept on dancing thinking this was the only way I could make money.

“A sadder aspect of dancing is seeing 30-40 year old women with no other skills dancing to support husbands and boyfriends who beat them and took their money and/or take care of their children. These women’s families turned their backs on them and they couldn’t think of any other way to make the money they needed to pay the bills, feed their children and give them a warm, safe place to sleep at night.

“We need as much help as we can to get these women and 17 and 18 year old children out of this destructive, exploitive business. They need help acquiring skills so they can work well-paying regular 9-5 jobs so they can go home, feed their kid and tuck them into bed at night. Then these women can get up in the morning look at themselves in the mirror and like what they see. Then they can feel like “normal” contributing members of society.

“I have stopped dancing and so have a lot of other girls that I danced with. I go to work and go to school. The other girls do one or both as well. We live comfortably and happily in nice, furnished apartments, we have transportation, and there’s always food in the fridge, but we need to help these other girls who are drinking, doing drugs, and selling their bodies. Without organizations like Citizens for Community Values and their volunteers I would still be in the business thinking, “There’s no where else to go.”

All sixty women helped in the “A Way Out Program” have suffered abuse and abandonment. All have tried furiously to make their world work apart from God, but the courageous ones have chosen God’s truth over the lies they once believed and are now living life, not just surviving.

Consider making a difference in a young woman’s life in 2002 by joining our volunteer force or by referring any young woman who desires to leave the sex industry or who has been harmed by pornography to us. Call Carol Wiley at 685-1493 or email: carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Destructiveness of Topless Dancing

The Destructive World of Topless Dancing

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way Out Victim Assistance ProgramSponsored by Citizens for Community Values of Memphis

Most citizens don’t have a clear picture of the deceptive practices used by sex oriented businesses to lure, entrap, use and discard vulnerable young women? For years I would drive by Platinum Plus and say a quite prayer, “Lord, we don’t need this type of business in Memphis. Do something, Lord!” I would drive on never realizing the depth of human degradation inside those walls, until a stripper came to me for counseling. This beautiful young woman’s story broke my heart, and after she left, I cried praying, “Lord, she could have been my teenage daughter” Reality is that she is someone’s precious child and God never created her for the life she chose.

The following facts about the world of a topless dancer are taken from the testimony given by Mr. David Sherman, former Midwest Manager of Déjà vu, before the Michigan House Committee on Ethics and Constitution Law on January 12, 2000. Hopefully readers will be shocked out of complacency and provoked to action.

Drug and alcohol use is rampant from the start. “The dancers call it partying. They don’t realize that they are medicating themselves in order to do the work that they do.”

The abortion rate is extremely high. “…most have lost contact with family members do to what they do. They also feel they could never take the chance on flawing the body from carrying a child. Additionally, dancers believe they have no way to support a baby without dancing, and therefore can’t quit to have one. Basically, they are caught in a real, painful catch-22.”

Girls are hired as waitresses even though waitresses are not needed. This makes the club atmosphere become part of their life. “At this point, they see it as a job, not as stripping and are converted quite easily to dancing. Once dancing, they get used to being objectified. It becomes important to them to hear how beautiful they are 200 times a day as it is to actually make the money from dancing.”

Girls develop “BDA” (Basic Dancer Attitude). “This is when the dancer thinks that no matter what friends, children, husband and families think about her, it doesn’t matter. They can all be replaced because of the patrons around her find her attractive, beautiful and idolized.” “…With friends and family gone from their lives, they exist alone in this dark, subculture of sex, drugs, alcohol and prostitution. All of this perverse living, to the dancer, is now just part of her normal lifestyle.”

After a few years at the BDA level, the dancer realizes she is getting older and attempts to fit back into society. “She tries boyfriends, school or really anything to cling to what is “normal”. Realizing that she cannot live in both worlds, she returns to the subculture of the Adult Business, actually despising the real world. This leads to more dependency on drugs and alcohol, which now makes her 100% lost to this life. The dancers will continue living like this until they realize they can no longer stay at their current level, and keep making money and getting compliments. Once they realize this, they begin to master more perverse things to make cash, to make up for fading looks and dancer burnout.”

The cycle becomes more vicious with struggles with depression, drugs, alcohol and body mutilation to stay thing. “Finally, they realize they can no longer keep up with the new and younger girls and leave, going to one of five places.”

A filthy, nasty club where they perform and do some of the vilest and filthiest acts you can imagine to make money.

Some turn to prostitution, meeting customers outside of the club. The club now becomes a place for them to meet new “clients”.

Some marry just to be able to survive. But the addictions to drugs alcohol normally shatter and destroy these relationships.

Some actually do break away and go to school to become productive citizens, but the frequency of this is around 1 of 50.

They become society’s throwaway people. People used up, degraded, and even sold by the people who own these establishments.

They are ultimately destroyed by a world that our communities have closed their eyes to. Every woman hired in a strip club is viewed by the club manager as a potential stripper. There is no limit to the strategies he will employ to convince his new prey to take off her clothes for the first time. Once this occurs, he proceeds to program her to become a professional, who ceases to be prey and becomes a passive/aggressive predator, who will say anything that it takes to get money from her patrons. Her whole world is now the topless club, wild parties, regular customers, and seasoned dancers.

It takes a lot of courage on a woman’s part to choose to walk away from the subculture described by Mr. Sherman to re-enter a world she barely remembers, but by God’s grace she can. You can help us change a precious woman’s future. Call Carol Wiley at (901) 685-1493 or email carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Passion for Purity

A Passion for Purity

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim Assistance

Purity is an internal matter, of the mind and conscience, not external. Jesus made this very clear when He verbally chastised the Pharisees in Luke 11:40 (NAS), “You foolish ones, did not He who made the outside make the inside also?”

This is an important principle to remember as we try to make changes in our cultural norms, especially in the area of pornography and the harm it causes. We will never be able to make great strides in dealing with the detrimental effects of pornography in our society until we understand that it is a matter of the deterioration of a person’s heart and mind, one-heart and mind at a time.

The distasteful externals like the Sex-Oriented Businesses are there because a cancer has been growing in individual hearts and over-time the result is a seared conscience. They no longer can discern good from evil, health from depravation, life from death.

The distasteful externals like the Sex-Oriented Businesses are there because a cancer has been growing in individual hearts and over-time the result is a seared conscience. They no longer can discern good from evil, health from depravation, life from death.

The pornographers have been sending subtle messages for years and little by little our society’s standards for decency have been eroding. For example, what one laughs at one learns to accept. Check it out! Look at the messages on the sitcoms. People laugh at lifestyles and life choices today that would have been considered shameful ten years back. Today we laugh without thought of the erosion of decency within our own souls or the subtle lies we have bought that makes things once considered base and distasteful now funny. This is a pornographers dream.

Purity is an internal matter, of the mind and conscience, not external. Jesus made this very clear when He verbally chastised the Pharisees in Luke 11:40 (NAS), “You foolish ones, did not He who mad the outside make the inside also?”

This is an important principle to remember as we try to make changes in our cultural norms, especially in the area of pornography and the harm it causes. We will never be able to make great strides in dealing with the detrimental effects of pornography in our society until we understand that it is a matter of the deterioration of a person’s heart and mind, one-heart and mind at a time.

The distasteful externals like the Sex-Oriented Businesses are there because a cancer has been growing in individual hearts and over-time the result is a seared conscience. They no longer can discern good from evil, health from depravation, life from death.

The distasteful externals like the Sex-Oriented Businesses are there because a cancer has been growing in individual hearts and over-time the result is a seared conscience. They no longer can discern good from evil, health from depravation, life from death.

The pornographers have been sending subtle messages for years and little by little our society’s standards for decency have been eroding. For example, what one laughs at one learns to accept. Check it out! Look at the messages on the sitcoms. People laugh at lifestyles and life choices today that would have been considered shameful ten years back. Today we laugh without thought of the erosion of decency within our own souls or the subtle lies we have bought that makes things once considered base and distasteful now funny. This is a pornographers dream.

Self-actualization is the sitcom’s god and we have a generation of people who live in “freedom” that leads to isolation and bondage. Women are depicted as sex objects, men are only men if they can score, fathers are idiots that have to have domineering wives to run their families, kids are only sharp if they can talk crude and be disrespectful to all authority, love is sex whether one is married or not. The key to self-actualization is you are your own god and you are the only authority that exists for you. Your truth comes from inside your own heart. Your fulfillment in life is all that matters – you are an island. God tells one to beware of this type thinking in Jeremiah 17:9 (NAS), “The heart is more deceitful than all else and desperately sick; who can understand it?”

Yet, the pornographers being their own god feed on people who are willing to laugh themselves to sleep. Give pornographers a generation of people who live without an understanding of the dignity God desires for their lives and they are in control. Give pornographers a generation of people who believe that self-fulfillment without any boundaries is the ultimate goal of life and they set the standards for decency in a society.

The enemy has arrived and is unashamedly showing force in our families and our culture. We are laughing ourselves to sleep while the pornography industry is growing and claiming new victims daily. Sex-oriented businesses aren’t thriving in our city because the majority like them or want them, sex for sale on the Internet isn’t an eight billion dollar a year industry because the majority of citizens like the victimization of men, women, and children. It is running rampant because many people are rationalizing and compromising instead of standing up for what they really want for their families, their cities, their culture. Won’t you take the challenge and leave the sidelines and join an army of people who are saying NO! To the lies and the norms that the pornographers are selling as truth.

As citizens, people of faith in God Almighty, the Creator of Life and Author of True Freedom we must develop a passion for purity and God’s standards for life. We can make a difference when a passion for purity rules our minds and conscience. Join Citizens for Community Values as we strategically fight for decency in our culture. For more information, call me at 685-1493 or email me atcarol@ccvmemphis.org.

Wake-Up Call

A Wake-Up Call

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim Assistance

How did the sex industry become a twelve billion dollar a year venture? How did this happen in America, where there is a church on almost every corner and a large percentage of the people claim to be Christians? Better still how did it invade our city? These are common questions asked when someone first has their eyes opened to the magnitude of the pornography problem in our country. The sad truth is most people don’t ask these questions until the problem becomes personal and the damage is already done.

In an effort to measure the level of awareness and the attitude of the people in the Shelby County area about issues related to pornography and sexually oriented businesses, CCV hired Ethridge and Associates, L.L.C., a public opinion research and communications consulting firm, to conduct a baseline study using a random sampling of 400 Shelby County residents eighteen years of age or older in 1998 and a follow-up study in 2000. Some of the results were startling, but lend some understanding as to why pornographers are able to sneak into our neighborhoods, into our personal lives, and yes, into our homes via the Internet.

Consider the following results. Fewer people in 2000 than in 1998 said they had seen something they consider pornographic in Memphis or Shelby County. In 1998, 75% of the people said they believe pornography is harmful to the community compared to 72% in 2000. When asked if pornography was harmful to those who use it, the percentage dropped from 67% in 1998 to 56% in 2000. Ironically, in 1998, 61% said they had unintentionally or intentionally been exposed to pornography in Memphis or Shelby County compared to 50% in 2000, yet in the 2000 study more than six in ten said they have seen, read or heard advertising for sexually oriented businesses in the past few months in Shelby County. Another irony is that most agreed that pornography sites on the Internet were harmful and more readily assessable for children and 79% interviewed were aware of filtering software, yet only 12% reported using filters to protect their children.

We, the staff and volunteers of Citizens for Community Values, feel God had put a mandate on our lives to expose the darkness and deception of the pornography industry, and to help anyone whose life has been harmed by any facet of the sex-oriented businesses. Our vision is to empower concerned citizens and community leaders to significantly reduce sexual exploitation and violence in Greater Memphis area by: (1) Increasing public awareness of the availability and harm of exploitative and abusive pornography, particularly in the lives of children. (2) Supporting the enactment and enforcement, within the Constitution, of limitations on pornography. (3) Offering assistance to people harmed by pornography.

This vision would be overwhelming if we did not believe that God was sending out a wake-up call to many concerned citizens that enough is enough—we will not allow our community to be destroyed by the subtle power behind the sex-oriented businesses and pornographers. We believe He will cause many to hear the cries of the victims who are filled with fear and hopelessness. In Isaiah 61:1-3, the wake-up called is clear, “The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, because the Lord has anointed Me to preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted. To proclaim liberty to the captives, And the opening of the prison to those who are bound; to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; To comfort all who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.” Will you answer and help us clean up our community and heal the brokenhearted?

For more information contact: Carol Wiley,Victim Assistance DirectorCitizens for Community Values685-1493carol@ccvmemphis.org

Negative Realities

Negative Realities Redirected

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way Out Victim Assistance Program(A Ministry of Citizens for Community Values of Memphis)

Citizens for Community Values was formed in 1992, by a group of concerned citizens with a vision to empower other concerned citizens and community leaders to significantly reduce sexual exploitation and violence in Greater Memphis and the surrounding areas by: (1) Increasing public awareness of the availability and harm of exploitive and abusive pornography, particularly in the lives of children. (2) Supporting the enactment and enforcement, within the Constitution, of limitations on pornography. (3) Offering assistance to people harmed by pornography and sex oriented businesses.

Since day one it has been an uphill battle with many victories and some discouraging setbacks, but the vision remains the same and by God’s grace the resolve to continue the battle is stronger than in the beginning. The bottom line is we are trying to impact a culture where for the most part, moral absolutes have been abdicated and an individualistic gray zone for morals and decision making has been embraced.

Several statistics concerning the moral temperature of today’s culture from The Barna Research Group of California’s, The Year’s Most Intriguing Findings are quite sobering.

Compared to two years ago, just half as many Americans believe that absolute moral truth exists, dropping from 38% in January 2000 to only 22% in November 2001.

Based on people’s reactions to a series of moral issues, Americans are comfortable legalizing activities – such as abortion, homosexuality and pornography – that they feel are immoral.

Religious teaching or values minimally affect people’s moral choices. The major influences on such decisions are the expected personal outcomes of their choices, minimizing conflict over their choices, and the values their parents taught them.

By the end of the decade, 50 million Americans will seek to have their spiritual experience solely through the Internet, rather than at a church; and upwards of 100 million Americans will rely upon the Internet to deliver some aspects of their religious experience.

Mr. Barna states, “One of the greatest values of research is that it can identify myths that we hold on to — myths that often prevent us from seizing opportunities or that prevent us from responding appropriately to the world around us.” He also says, “ A lot of anger that was expressed to us in reaction to these findings reflects the difficulty we sometimes have in changing our predispositions and coming to grips with a world that is rapidly changing and does not conform to the rules we believed were firmly entrenched. Knowing the reality, rather than the myth, can help us address reality and, if need be, redirect it.

What a powerful challenge to all citizens, especially those who believe the Bible and who believe the principles found within its pages to be true. We must be willing to look at the world we live in realistically, to do what we can keep the moral standards of our communities high and to help those who are in the world’s darkness to come to “The Light of the world”.

Reality in Memphis is that it is the home of numerous topless clubs, adult book and video stores, escort services, adult novelty stores and prostitution. If a visitor to our city goes to memphis.citysearch.com on the Internet, he or she will find a topless club, Platinum Plus listed as one of the top ten bar and grills in Memphis. One more click and this visitor gets graphic reviews of the activities going on in the club. Another reality in Memphis is that there is a real grassroots effort going on to clean up our city and to help the victims of sexual exploitation and crime to get the help they need to escape the degradation they are suffering. The negative realities in Memphis and the surrounding areas can and are being redirected one battle at a time by citizens, who are joining together to encourage the efforts being made by our police department and elected officials. Also, lives of many young women who are being abused and exploited by sex-oriented businesses are being changed when they come into the A Way Out Victim Assistance Program sponsored by CCV.

For more information, or if you are interested in helping redirect the negative realities in Memphis and the surrounding areas, or if you would like to help change a young woman’s negative reality into a reality that is positive and based on the love of Christ, call Carol Wiley at 685-1493 or email her at carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Disspelling the Myths

Citizens for Community Values Advocates Dispelling the Myths About Pornography

By Carol WileyDirector of Victim Assistance

On December 31, 2000, Marc Perrusqula of The Commercial Appeal wrote an article exposing the activities that go on in the topless clubs in Memphis, suggesting that stronger law enforcement is a must if we are to deal with the problems that exist. He reported that representatives from The Commercial Appeal had personally witnessed scores of apparent violations of city ordinances forbidding full nudity and physical contact between dancers and customer at Platinum Plus and three other local topless clubs. His research had uncovered some 100 police response service calls to Platinum Plus and some of the fines that had been levied against this establishment by The Memphis Alcohol Commission.

Councilman Brent Taylor stated that he is attempting to demonstrate that Platinum Plus is a public nuisance and does not need to be permitted to expand. He also expressed feeling strongly that authorities need to take strong action to counter activities at this club.

One reason there is not more public outcry for action is that the porn industry is a twelve billion dollar a year business that uses a series of myths to desensitize the public into accepting the immoral and the bizarre as the norm. Let’s look at eight common myths used to defend pornography and truth that dispels them.

“Pornography is a Broad Term Which Cannot be Defined.” The legal definition of pornography includes four clear categories: (1) Adult obscenity (“hard-core” pornography) (2) Child pornography (3) material harmful to minors (4) Indecency. Each of these categories has a specific legal definition established by the U. S. Supreme Court and each can be prosecuted.

“Obscenity is a Matter of Opinion—It Cannot Be Defined” The U. S. Supreme Court ruling states that Obscenity is 1) Graphic material that is obsessed with sex and/or sexual violence; 2) Material that is obviously offensive; and 3) Material that is lacking in serious value. The vast majority of obscenity cases brought to court result in a guilty plea and verdict.

“Obscenity and Pornography are protected by The First Amendment” In 1957, the U. S. Supreme Court decided that obscenity was “outside the protection intended for speech and press at the time during with the First Amendment was written.” The First Amendment does not protect slander, false advertising, perjury, obscenity, or child pornography.

“Pornography Doesn’t Hurt Anyone” Research shows that use of pornography is anything but harmless. Law enforcers estimate that the typical child molester will abuse more than 360 victims over the course of his lifetime. He is able to abuse 30-60 before he is even caught for the first time. (Dr. Gene Abel, Emory University). In his studies of convicted child molesters, Dr. William Marshall discovered that 77% of those who molested boys and 87% of those who molested girls said they were regular users of hardcore pornography. He also reports that 86% of adult sex offenders and convicted rapists said they were regular users of pornography, with 57% admitting direct imitation of pornographic scenes they enjoyed in the commission of their rapes.

“Pornography Is A Harmless Outlet for Dangerous Impulses” In his extensive studies of pornography users, Dr. Victor Cline, a Clinical Psychologist has observed the following pattern in the development of pornography users. A pornography user (1) becomes addicted, (2) uses more and more, (3) becomes indifferent to other people, and (4) finally acts out what he has seen, leading to rape and other violent crimes.

“Pornography is Exciting Because It’s Illegal. If It Is Legalized People Will Become Bored With It.” Almost forty years of experience in cities, ours included, with de facto legalization—not enforcing the laws and look at the results. The expose in The Commercial Appeal gave us a first hand look at the results of this type thinking.

“You Can’t Legislate Morality” Every piece of legislation passed is based on some moral conviction. Our country was founded on moral principles. Citizens for Community Values isn’t trying to dictate the morality of the people who make and sell pornography, but we are concerned with the impact of pornography on users and the violence committed against families and children by the people who consume it.

“Pornography is a Choice: If You Don’t Like It, Don’t Buy It” This sounds good, but when addiction takes hold the addict feels they have no choice and live life controlled by the addiction.

These myths are encouraged by pornographers to rock citizens to sleep to the extensive personal and cultural damage that exists because of their greed. Ironically it is politically correct to fight to protect the environment but, politically incorrect to fight for decency in our culture. Citizens need to become “Cultural Environmentalists”, who are concerned with setting a standard of decency that provokes people in our culture to meditate on whatever things are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, virtuous, praiseworthy, and of good report (Philippians 4:8), not be drawn into the base addictions offered by the pornographers.

If you feel God pulling at your heartstrings challenging you to join CCV in the battle for decency in our culture or to help those who are victims of pornography and sex-oriented businesses, please call me, Carol Wiley at 685-1493 or email me at carol@ccvmemphis.org.

Victims Are Helped

Victims of the Adult Entertainment Industry are Helped by Citizens for Community Values’ Victim Assistance Program

By Carol Wiley, DirectorCitizens for Community Values

Citizens for Community Values’ Victim Assistance Program has helped 47 victims leave the sex-oriented business and gain control of their lives by providing financial assistance s, weekly counseling with a professional, physical and dental healthcare, food and clothing for the victims and their families, and special activities including a weekly Bible Study. Each victim coming into the program is assigned to a mature, Godly woman to be her mentor. The role each mentor plays is as diverse as the needs of the woman she mentors. Most importantly the mentor is a role model of God’s love and normalcy for one who has only experienced chaos.

Normal for most victims is a very dysfunctional family and abuse. Forty-three of the women helped by CCV were sexually abused before age 10. All have experienced mental, emotional, and verbal abuse, and many have experienced physical abuse. This does not take away their responsibility for their choices, but it does greatly affect their ability to make wise choices.

One universal characteristic in the victims is decisions are made with a survival mentality with no consideration of the damage to themselves or of future consequences. This leads them into a downward spiral that can lead to death if someone doesn’t intervene and help them understand the love of Christ and the difference between living and surviving. A good example is one victim’s story.

“I am a 37-year old woman. At the age of ten days, I was left with a great aunt and uncle. My mother was emotionally unstable, in and out of treatment centers and group homes. Her children spent time with her, with relatives, and in foster care. I never knew my father and was told that I was the product of rape by my mom’s foster father. From age seven, I was in several foster homes. At 13, I began a long cycle of drinking and drugging, hanging with gangs and frequent incarceration.

“At age 16, the state of California (CA) declared me legally responsible for my self and I soon became engaged in prostitution. At 18, I moved in with an ex-Marine who was selling drugs. My son was born in 1981. I was still prostituting and someone told me there was an easier, safer way to make money—topless dancing. I left my son’s father to “advance my career” with a pimp. I was totally committed to adult entertainment—prostitution and topless dancing. When that fell apart, I relocated to North Carolina with my son and his father. We lived in extreme poverty and I fell in with a group who followed mailmen and stole government checks. I went back to CA without my son, returned to adult entertainment and began heavy heroin use.

“In 1986, my child’s father was killed. I returned to NC and the Feds caught up with me. I was sent to prison, was paroled, lost parole and received a longer sentence due to repeated drug use. In 1989, I moved to Memphis to be near my great aunt. She was one of the few positive people in my life and we had remained close through the years. I thought it was a chance for me to get away from the bad stuff and make a new start.

“My attempts at self-rehabilitation failed again. I lived with an alcoholic man, taking five years of physical and emotional abuse. I moved in with another in-and-out of jail man who used drugs. My sleeping dragon of drug addiction woke. I went back to the topless clubs, and prostitution and all that goes with it.

“I had money—to travel, to buy anything I wanted, to take care of people—and still I wanted more. I thought heroin would give me what I wanted. I had money, drugs, and all the material things money could buy, but I had no son, no family, no love, and no real happiness. I had no purpose in life except addictions. I was soul sick….”

To shorten a long story, this is where CCV’s Victim Assistance Program stepped in. This woman, who now knows Christ, has broken the downward spiral and is on the road to life. What a blessing to participate with God as He sets captives free. If you would like to help in this ministry contact me by email, carol@ccvmemphis.org or call me at 685-1493.

War on Pornography

The War on Pornography Will Be Won, One Battle at a Time

By Carol Wiley, DirectorA Way Out Victim Assistance ProgramSponsored by Citizens for Community Values of Memphis

Sir Edmund Burke said, “All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing!” In Galatians 6:9, Paul’s exhortation is, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” These two exhortations are a motivating force for all who are actively involved in the battle to protect children and families from the harms of pornography and the sex-oriented businesses. When the overall battle seems too fierce to win, these words remind us to focus on one battle at a time and to remember that no matter how rich and powerful the porn industry may be each strategic victory is important to winning the war and God is more powerful and resourceful than the porn advocates ever will be. This motivates us to keep fighting and to keep helping young women to walk away from a life of degradation and shame into a life of dignity and success.

Each time a young woman leaves the topless club scene a strategic battle is won. To date we have helped fifty-nine young women to leave the sex-oriented business and at the present time we have fifteen women actively participating in A Way Out’s Victim Assistance Program.

Each time the laws that govern sex-oriented businesses are enforced a strategic battle is won. On Sunday, August 26, 2001 a small article appeared in the Commercial Appeal. It reported that an undercover operation was targeting adult-oriented businesses that stay open past midnight. Vice officers arrested the cashier at the Paris Theater on Summer. According to state law, it is illegal to operate an “adult oriented establishment” past midnight . In a follow-up article on August 29th, Major D. A. Betts, assistant commander of the Memphis Police Department said “It is not an undercover operation. We are simply checking to make sure these businesses are following the law and we are enforcing it.” This too is a strategic victory because most laws on the books are broken consistently in the clubs and porn shops. Hopefully this is the first of many such victories.

As citizens we need to not only voice our disdain when wrong goes unnoticed by those in power, but we also should voice our praise when elected officials and law enforcement steps up to the plate and takes the porn industry to task by making sure they obey the law or pay the consequences. It would be a good thing to write our Police Chief and our District Attorney and let them know as citizens we are behind them and encourage them to keep up the good work.

The war for our children’s minds and our family’s security is still raging as the porn peddlers seek to entrap parents and children. They aren’t satisfied to entrap the fathers and mothers, but they are constantly targeting our children via the Internet, teen magazines, Abercrombie and Fitch catalogs, etc. Statistics show that the largest audience for pornography is young boys between the age of seven and twelve. Our elected officials and law enforcement can’t win this war alone. WON’T YOU JOIN US IN THE BATTLE TO HELP VICITMS AND TO FIGHT FOR DECENCY AND HIGH MORAL STANDARDS IN OUR CITY?

One Mentor Shares Her Story

One Mentor Serving in Citizens for Community Values Victim Assistance Program Shares Her Story

By Carol Wiley,Director of Victim Assistance

The lifeblood of Citizens for Community Values Victim Assistance Program is the women who volunteer to mentor the victims leaving the sex-oriented businesses. These women wear different hats, depending on the need, such as role model, surrogate mom, babysitter, surrogate grandmother, disciple maker, friend, and/or advisor. The amount of time they devote to the woman they are mentoring varies. This is worked out between the victim and her mentor as they prioritize the victims needs, and take into account the mentor’s family priorities and individual commitments. Mentors are encouraged to keep their priorities in order because this is a life lesson in and of itself for the victims. The mentors and the victim assistance director back each other up to make sure the victim’s needs and emergencies are met.

Here is the heart of one of our mentor’s expressed in her own words.

“From the sidelines, I watched a good friend of mine mentor several young dancers, wanting to leave the night club industry. I had never thought much about the “gentlemen’s clubs” in town, but through my friend I saw the real faces, of the people who suffered, behind these disgraceful and humiliating businesses. I learned their personal stories. Virtually all of their histories were very sad, either because of the effect of growing up in dysfunctional families, or due to the poor choices made very early in their lives. Furthermore, to hear the extent of what goes on in the strip clubs that I routinely drive by repulsed me. I would bet the general public has no idea what kind of sex and violence surrounds these Memphis establishments. I felt my friend was doing meaningful hands-on work, the work that others might feel they hadn’t the right gifts to do.

“After many months, I decided to try, like my friend, to reach out to another human being, a woman not that unlike myself, with similar hopes and dreams for her life. I found that while it is easy to serve someone I know and love, ministering to a stranger, that I might even be a little afraid of, did not seem particularly natural or comfortable. Yet God has shown me, as I trusted He would show me how to love and serve someone in a seemingly hopeless situation, even though I may not receive the thanks that I so often have come to expect when I accept a big responsibility.

“The lives of these young women are not neat or clean or predictable. They aren’t hanging around waiting for us to “fix” them. But the women that I’ve know personally, who made the decision to get out of the sex industry in Memphis, the ones that I have loved, encouraged and supported, have been like tiny flower buds. They have been closed so tightly for so long. Their petals have been hidden from the sun. If I can show them the light and warmth that I know in Jesus Christ, these little buds can come out of the darkness, into the light, and be cared for, and bloom. They will grow and so will I. (John 1:9—The true light that give light to every man was coming into the world)”

Join us in the wonderful ministry of pointing victims in darkness to freedom in the light. Call me, Carol Wiley at (901) 685-1493 or email me carol@ccvmemphis.org.