Thursday, August 03, 2006

Animalistic or Human Nature? Or are Both the Same?

All my life, I knew I was a good fella’. No. Wait. That’s not where I was going with this. Let me start all over again.

All my life, I knew I was a lesbian. At the age of four years old, I fantasized about Marie Osmond. Shut up—I fantasized about her babysitting me or something, and maybe a little kiss here and there. I really didn’t know what sex was, but I knew I woke up shaking and quivering at the age of four not knowing what took place. Call it animalistic, call it human nature, or call me a heathen straight from hell---this is what happened at my very early age.

Don’t psychoanalyze me or even entertain the thought of child molestation, because that wasn’t the case. I was never touched by an adult ‘in that way’. I was always taken care of in a parental type of loving way.

”Oh you must have blocked it out.” Oh give me a break. The only thing I blocked out were the intense orgasms brewing inside me when I was a little tyke running-a-muck. (Or at least tried to anyway.)

Getting back to ‘knowing’ I was born like this… I used to watch television thinking how beautiful the women were, and how all men seemed to look alike in soap operas, as I sat home playing, while my mother took care of me. The men always had that part on the side of their hair, all wearing the same suits (so it appeared) and all had the general mannerisms. The women were pretty, and their hairstyles were all unique and done up so beautifully. I was drawn to them physically, and emotionally I felt the need to be around women for the nurturing aspect of it.

“Well what made you decide you were gay at the age of nineteen?” People ask me. I didn’t decide to “be gay”, I was always gay. I decided to come out of the closet and be comfortable with myself, instead of constantly trying to hide my feelings. It was like being in jail.

At the age of eight years old, I was caught making out with a friend who lived near me. My mother quickly shut the door and later explained that I should never do that again.

”But we were playing house, ma!”“Well it’s not normal and you’re way too young to be kissing anyone—especially another girl. It’s not natural!” My mother said, as she was ready to start dialing up her gossipy friends for some much needed advice.

Scientifically speaking, if it isn’t a gene, then what explains all these sexual feelings and desires I had towards women at the age of four years old and on? I never was exposed to any pornographic material, nor did I fantasize about things I’ve seen that weren’t suited for my young eyes.

Some of my closest friends tell me they have never masturbated until reaching a certain age in their twenties. Some even say that they have never experienced an orgasm before. Do I believe them? Sure I do. Why wouldn’t I? I totally believe that everyone is born differently than another; unique in their traits, the way they were built and designed for their purpose in life.

Here’s where my problem comes in. Now, I dated men before. I have never been hurt by a man—ever. I never had a bad experience with a guy. A lot of people will say, ”Oh, well she probably was really hurt by some man, which led her to this lesbian lifestyle.” Wrong. The men in my life were always respectful towards me and treated me nicely.

I think men are beautiful. Some I actually have to turn my head and say, ”Wow! He’s hot!” I’m human. It’s normal to appreciate the beauty of any gender, in my opinion.

”Oh well you’re going to hell for being a homosexual! Repent and give up your sinful nature!!!” Freaky radical Christian bible thumpin, holy rollin’, holier than thou nutjobs will spew out to me.

God has a purpose for everyone. I was born gay. I know I was. I have proof – just from my life alone. I know God loves me, He accepts me ‘as is’. Unconditional love bypasses the flaws of sin; and imperfection. It overcomes the idiosyncrasies of human nature; the flaws of life that come to play each and every single day. To me, this is why Jesus died for us on the cross. God knew, that we were all going to be imperfect. If my parents can accept me, what makes anyone think that God can’t?

I have some making remarks about the book I published. The people making these ‘remarks’ have not even read my book, but are they’re already bashing it. My book is not only for the gay and lesbian community, but it deals with relationship issues, for straight and gay people. It deals with a break up that I recovered from—through prayer. It mainly focuses on the miracles that God places in your life, if you make Him the person you lean on the most. It’s mostly about God…not about homosexuality. It’s foundation is unconditional love, and how prayer works through the rough patches. It explains how to pray, and how to listen as well; to be aware of the small messages that come through from God.

Maybe my purpose on earth was to be a lesbian, who has a love for Christ; to demonstrate that even as sinners, we are free to come to Him… Religion has placed a bad stigma on those who are imperfect. And who are the people in the world who are imperfect? ALL OF US. We all fall short.

You can debate me until you’re blue in the face that God doesn’t love me, or God doesn’t accept me. I know the truth—which is God’s unconditional love…for me…and for you.

Now religion put aside for those who are atheist or believe in another God, we have to start focusing on loving ourselves and treating ourselves with the most utmost respect. Why are we relying on these holy rolling freaks to decide what’s good for us? Oh, they’re saving our souls and making sure we go to heaven. To tell you the truth, these people don’t give a rat’s ass about your destiny, once the afterlife has opened its doors for you. These people want some sort of reward—possibly a shiny gold halo or a pair of wings they’ve been wanting from heaven’s Macy’s department.

Give me a break. These people are in for themselves---and themselves only. They’re selfish, judgmental and full of self-righteousness. Are these the people you truly want to take advice from? Or do you want to take advice from someone who relates to you; someone who is imperfect---a human---who will understand and have compassion for whatever circumstance you are going through?

People who criticize your life are the ones that are unhappy with their own. They have nothing better to do than to judge every single sinful seed that falls off your ‘fruitful’ or ‘fruitless’ tree and crush it with all their might. Who’s to even say that your tree isn’t ‘fruitful’? Just because you are without child or not serving some man who calls himself a ‘husband’, when he’s actually a self-serving bigot with no desire but to control you?

Like I said, don’t judge a book by its cover, and especially mine. And I speak to those who have already criticized my book, without opening one page. It’s hypocrisy and judgments in its finest form.

I realize I have a lot of straight readers out there. But I am sure that you have either a family member, or a friend who is living a homosexual lifestyle. The best thing you can do for them is to accept how they are, because they’re not going to change just because someone says it’s wrong. God will convict people’s heart, if He feels this is not the path that should have been taken. Don’t we trust God anymore? I certainly do, and I know I have a mission out there to tell people suffering through the painful bigotry that God loves you no matter what. God is there for you—waiting for you to come to Him.

Let people of hatred mumble and grumble about your lifestyle. Let them judge you, while you live a life of peace and happiness. Let them say whatever it is that they want to, for you know in your heart where you stand, and where you stand with God. That’s the most important thing to remember.

It may not even be homosexuality that you’re dealing with. Maybe it’s an addiction. Do you think God hates you just because you have an addiction with alcohol, drugs or sex? God loves all His children—He says so Himself.

Who the heck is Marie Osmond? An actress or something???? *googles it*

Hmmm... she's OK-looking. I prefer modern chicks, Kiera Knightly for example even if she stole my man. Damn it all! Why did she get to kiss Johnny Depp though?! Johnny is mine... MINEE!!!! Especially when he's in Jack Sparrow form. MINE!

Deb,You are exactly right!!! God loves you and all of us exactly as we are....and He indeed did design you to be the unique individual that you are. Yeah...I believe that homosexuality is not God's plan or design for us...BUT...neither are alot of other things that we approve of or are a part of in the Christian culture that you and I share. Your relationship with God belongs to YOU, not me...and I for one do trust Him to lead and guide you in your journey. I have no condemnation for you. I've already told you my belief, 'nuff said. Oh...and I will refer to you as gay, not homosexual and I will respect your civil right to form a union with your partner and enjoy benefits as such. I'm kind of an "odd duck" in the Christian world....oh well. OH...and...just so you know, I'm a sinner, always have been, always will be. As I continue to grow in Christ, He continues to reveal things to me that I need to let go of...but, the reality of the situation is that I'm not going to be perfect in this age. All I can do is continue to put my hope in Christ and do my best to love others as He does. You didn't ask for my advice...but...if you are angry with "Christian" folks who don't treat you with love and respect, this is your struggle right now. And you know (i feel i'm sort of preaching to the choir here) that the best thing for you to do is to pray for them and to ask Christ to help you love them even if they don't demonstrate love towards you.I'll stop now.

~deb, grace is so right - God has told us that doing his work would not be easy, and they we would face persecution because of it... you, my friend, are probably facing a little more than most of us have to in order to bring others to Christ, but you're doing a commendable job!

My cousin is going through this right now - he won't come out b/c he feels his family will be crushed (for religious reasons). He seems to be forgetting that his uncle has been out for YEARS and his family accepts him... suppressing this has given him nothing but a bad case of depression, OCD, and a desire to avoid church like the plague. What a shame...

You say "Unconditional love bypasses the flaws of sin; and imperfection. It overcomes the idiosyncrasies of human nature; the flaws of life that come to play each and every single day." You make it sound like being gay is a sin, imperfection, and/or a flaw of life. I know you did not mean that so just publish a correction and all will be fine. :)

BTW: See where Kettle One came in last at the World Vodka competition in Sweden? Bummer for you. ;)

This paragraph right here is something some of my friends can't grasp, because I'm a lesbian and therefore, MUST hate men.

I think men are beautiful. Some I actually have to turn my head and say, ”Wow! He’s hot!” I’m human. It’s normal to appreciate the beauty of any gender, in my opinion.

I totally agree. And I think being a homosexual is a compounded effort of nature and nuture working as one. I might even go out on a limb and say that it's part of a plan to control population in a safe, humane way.

What worries me and upsets me is some societies and religions - such as mine... do not, will not and shant accept me. I don't know where to turn to tell you the truth. Half the time, u dont find anyone; most are closet. People get jailed if they come out, persecuted and shunned. their lives literally are ova.. You're lucky to be where you are and with people who accept you :)

I just found out recently my nephew is gay. I had an idea he was... but noone in his family talked about it.I am so very proud of him!He has a wonderful life with a partner now.He has always been my favorite nephew amongst 4 other nephews.His family supports him totally, and that makes me so happy...as my brother had a little difficult time with it for a while.Of-course my nephew knew he was gay since he was a young boy.Have a great day!

Why would people be upset that you are happy? Are these unhappy people that are jealous? Nothing wrong with being gay. Nothing wrong with being merry. Ok, playing it's a terrible thing. Kidding again. When a good looking woman marries an ugly guy, do people tell her she could have done better? When a fat chick marries a doctor, do people tell him he should have went for the supermodel? People, as a rule, are idiots. If you are happy, then fork the rest of them. No one has the right to say what you can do with a consenting adult. Nope, not even the corrupt politicians with misstresses and hookers that are unfaithful to their wives, nope not even those pious guys.

Let people of hatred mumble and grumble about your lifestyle. Let them judge you, while you live a life of peace and happiness. Let them say whatever it is that they want to, for you know in your heart where you stand, and where you stand with God. That’s the most important thing to remember

Deb! As always you put things well. I recently heard that studies have shown that being gay is not a choice: it’s something in the brain that makes people gay or straight. And for all you religious people out there who believe God created man: this is God’s creation. To quote an 80ies poster: not all men are created equal. (only the poster had a very nice looking, half naked man on it and has nothing to do with this post). And I’ve said it before: it’s hard enough to find someone to love: let people be happy when they do find someone. Why are some so involved in other people’s life styles anyway? There’s war, global warming and child molesters out there: spend some of that energy on those issues instead.

Lucky: Thank you. It’s sad when family members will shun one another just because someone came out of the closet. To me—this is not a sign of unconditional love. “I will love you if you’re straight.” ←-Conditional.

Trapped: In the bible, everything is a sin. From eating shellfish, to sitting on a couch with a woman who is menstruating to marrying a single woman who had a divorce.

Smokin’ Steve: She was quite a looker---and on top of that, she never aged! She’s still beautiful, however, my taste in women have now changed of course. She was hot back then, right?

J r estaelle: A lot of people get confused with the concept of lesbians and them hating men. I can only speak for myself---but I love men. Where would we be without them? I think they are beautiful and so interesting---many of them! I love all the men in my life, and I do not regret for one minute being with my ex-boyfriends in the past. I just couldn’t love them the way they needed to be loved. When lesbians start manhating---it’s definitely a sign that they’ve been hurt before or they have some sort of issue with them. It’s sad really.

Madelene Rose: Over where you live Madelene, it is much worse! I couldn’t imagine. Now tell me if I’m wrong, but isn’t the death penalty an option for being a homosexual over where you are? I’d be hiding in the closet myself. Sorry you have to go through that. How do you feel about your region being so strict on it? And do you ever have relations with women---or have a girlfriend there?

Samuru: He’s very fortunate to have such a supportive family. That’s terrific. That--------is unconditional love right there! Thanks for sharing that!

Casually: People who harp on homosexuals obviously have some sort of ‘issue’ with it themselves. For instance, there is one person who continually focuses on issues of homosexuality and how God will punish us all, however, she was once a lesbian herself. So does this make her a hypocrite? Or does this mean she is still living in the past---or does this person simply have too much hatred to look past the person and who they really are…not just their sexuality?

Dreamer: ?

JJ: Hey, batgirl was one hot mama! But I’m sure you would have looked fabulous in a cape. ;)

Geek: Welcome. (For wha?)

~Dawn: I do let them…I also like to tell my views too, because sometimes people get the wrong impression and outlook on how we really are; leaving us with a bad name. Thanks Dawn.

Taylor: Hey girl! Never seen it …

Stevo: Don’t make me smack ya! ;)

Romey: Oh, …..WAY past your time buddy. That’s only because I’m seasoned…as you put it… (ha) Women only fake it when something’s not going ~right~ OR taking too long. I suppose nobody faked it with you…since you don’t take that long…so I have heard…(mua ha ha)

~Dawn: **G** You are so right!

Asa: Studies did show that, but it’s still scientifically not proven “at this point”. I do still believe that we were born with this regardless of what science or research says. And, some people think that we are just as bad as child molesters and rapists. That’s the scary part.

They think that all homosexuals are 'perverts'---even ones who have been together more than a decade...and are monogomous. They feel that two people of the same gender is not natural---the same as incest, the same as bestiality and the same as any other disturbing act. They're radical Christians who are close-minded and feel that God is all about putting people to death...when in fact, God is all about love, and forgiveness.

Hey Bossy! Have a terrific weekend too! Been hectic here today--will catch up with you this weekend!

Mark, which do you feel is the foundation of heterosexual acts? All are the same if before marriage, right? It's all a sin. Premarrital sex is a sin period. How many people do this? How many people marry other people who have had a divorce in the past? That's a sin too. Do you really feel that God is going to throw all His children into hell? I certainly don't believe so, and I believe that God said, "Oh wow, this is way too much for the humans to handle. Jesus! Go down and save them!" He loved us that much! Thanks for your comment. I hope that helps.

Mark, to me, being intimate with someone you love is a 'good' thing. I hope that answers your question. Thanks again for stopping by.

Jali, a cartoon? (hehe) That's cute. My first kiss was from a very big intimidating girl too...so I can relate. I was eight years old. Yikes!

Jd, thank you. You know, just because someone is Christian does not mean they have to 'act' holier than thou. It's fake and I wonder what the real person acts like behind closed doors. I'm an open book---and I don't believe in 'faking' my personality. Thus---my comments on your blog. ;)

Actually, death is not the accurate legal procedure. It is jail time and psychological treatment. It's hard, cuz you never find anyone and the ones you might like aren't so... Blah. I dated a man before, and for years and I do not like him very much. AnywayI feel that it getting easier for us since we have many, more than you think and Americans who work here accept us. Few people from the region do but mostly we're either pitied or hated.

Anyway, its hard to find anyone u love and get along with regardless of your gender or preference. Although, I find men easy to get since I am a bit of a flirt and they come like a... stampede of elephants. *sigh*I'm not saying i won't date a guy or marry one because I was with one for yrs and it was good at times. IDENTITY CRISIS MADDIE!

Will you put me out of my misery and email me your sign? I will reply on your love life. Hurry! STAT! LOL

Hey ~deb I totally and wholeheartedly agree with everything you said! AMEN! I didn't choose to be hetero, I didn't just wake up one day and decide that I love the males... Nope, I was just born that way. I always knew, ever since I was caught kissing Kevin Borden in the corner of the kindergarten classroom behind the building blocks. I figure it has to be the same regardless of gender preference. You have always been one of my fav writers. (((((~deb)))))

Deb, take your own advice Be calm, be still…and let God handle the rest.

now please, your an author, you write books to Help people for heavens sake! it ain't that hard a question.Which do you feel is the foundation for homosexual acts, good or evil? If you could give me reasons with examples, for your answers, it would be appreciated. By 'acts' I mean the sexual acts. at lest one?

examples would be nice, it feels nice could apply to a child molestor, a 'sheep lover' etc.. but Deb is not!

Again, nothing hard, just a heart felt answer.

Again, Which do you feel is the foundation for homosexual acts, good or evil? By acts, I mean the sexual act. If you could give me reasons with examples, it would be appreciated. At lest one example should not be that hard for Deb an author of a book that helps people grow closer to God, I would think.

I couldn't agree more. As long as we try to be good people, and live the best possible life we can. Making choices for the good, and loving, then god knows and it all comes out in the end. No matter your color, gender, preference, or religion.

It's all up to him anyway, why do idiots try to judge and say it's what god wants??? I want proof that he told them dirrectly.

burfica,proof? Do you actually think an all knowing God would give us His Holy word (Bible) to confuse us about His boundaries for our lives? If His authority is not contained in the Bible, then where is it?

Those idiots you speak of...is it possible they have studied the validity of the Bible,prayed, and submitted to His will and not their own a possibility? I am very educated, I ask questions, and I will die knowing the truth my friend. The truth has Nothing to do with what's in my earthly heart and fleshly desires. If it was found there, the death of Christ would be a joke! worthless! and meaningless!

Which do you feel is the foundation for homosexual acts, good or evil? By acts, I mean the sexual act. If you could give me reasons with examples, it would be appreciated. At lest one example should not be that hard for an author of a book that helps people grow closer to God, I would think.

Mark, here’s what I believe… Since almost everything we do is practically a sin, God said, “Wow, my children can’t handle all of this on their own…I’m going to give them my son, so He can save them.”

I believe that Jesus paid the price in “full”. God loved us that much. I accept that.

Now, two people who love one another with all their hearts, and who want to share their love in a physical way is a beautiful thing. This is not “evil” in my beliefs. What may be considered ‘bad’ or ‘unhealthy’ is being promiscuous and spreading disease; hurting yourself as well as others.

Being with a partner monogamously, in a loving relationship is “good”. How can that be wrong?

Let me ask you this… Why do most radical Christians rush over to the sexual aspect of a homosexual relationship? I haven’t even stated that my partner and I even have sex. So what makes you think we engage in sexual activities? (Trying to make a point here.) Relationships are not based on sex…Sex is just a bonus. But radical Christians will rush over immediately “assuming” things. In any case, what I am doing, and what other couples are doing behind closed doors should be their business only.

Do you think God is going to throw every person into the depths of hell? Think about this… What about a single woman marrying a divorced man? That’s a sin. What about premarital sex? That’s a sin. What about looking at a woman in a sexual or arousing way? (That’s considered the SAME as having sex with her in the biblical sense.) That’s a sin. How about gossiping? What about a white lie or stretching the truth? Have you ever looked at another person’s Mercedes and thought, “I wish I had that”, and fussed over who makes more money? Have you ever said, “Oh my GAWD!!!” ????? Using the Lord’s name in vain is in the ten commandments. Get this----homosexuality is not. But---this is why God gave us Jesus. Will you accept that? Jesus paid the FULL PRICE! How great is that??? I’m so grateful that God loved us so much, that He gave His only son to save us from our physical nature beating up our souls. Now we can rest.

Deb,Again, Which do you feel is the foundation for homosexual acts, good or evil? By acts, I mean the sexual act. If you could give me reasons with examples, it would be appreciated.

Hi there say it hot, thanks for your thoughts. Love is also the reason given by child molestors, they really think they are loveing the child. Perhaps you should define love and maybe we will have agreement.

I am not fixated on any acts, I just would like Deb to answer a very simple question. Which do you feel is the foundation for homosexual acts, good or evil? By acts, I mean the sexual act. If you could give me reasons with examples, it would be appreciated. At lest one example should not be that hard for an author of a book that helps people grow closer to God, I would think.

Thanks Deb,you say Good and becuase Jesus said so. Where did he say so?You also did not Provide One example. Nor did I assume you have sex.

You say God said“Wow, my children can’t handle all of this on their own…I’m going to give them my son, so He can save them.”So you think God says 'WOW' and was surprised at something? An All Knowing, Almighty God..surprised? Where on earth do get or make such an absurd conclusion? no offense.

It is not uncommon for people like you Deb who realize they cannot turn to the real God (Bible), while living in a bad way, to make up a god that allows you to do what it is you want to do. Your god is in Your image. Your god is an imitation god, who condones imitation acts..(homosexual acts)

Heterosexual sex inside of a marriage can be blessed by God. There is nothing dirty or shameful about sex that is blessed. You don't have to flaunt it in public, there is nothing dirty or shameful about it.

That is why you Deb could not answer my question with One reason or One example.

I believe you unknowingly perhaps are making a mockery of the death and suffering of Christ for your sins, when you ignore sin, minimize sin, and act no differently than before you knew Christ and what He did for you. It makes you Deb a false convert, and without Christ. I pray you will actually study God's word and rejoice in the blood of Christ. You can't be happy with the cleanising Blood of Christ, if you think you are good. It's like someone paying a $1.00 parking fine for you..big deal right?

Christ died for you, becuase it was You and I that deserved to Die! I have sinned all those things you mentioned! I am gulity and deserve death in God's eyes! God's laws should convict your heart and have you dropping to your knees and crawling to the cross of Christ. What you do when you get to the cross, is up to you!

In addition, the Bible teaches us that God is not concerned with how well your earthly life is, i.e. Job, Money, Sex, Nice House, Car, Worldly Happiness and Pleasures etc...He is concerned about your Eternity, which will be spent with Him (Heaven) or Without Him (Hell!). Yes I said Hell. Imagine the apostle Paul, beaten, chained, bloody, and rejoicing in Christ! That's exactly what he did. Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me"NASB.

Unlike many others at this point in their lives, I will beg God to forgive me and accept the blood of Christ as payment for my sins. I have been convicted by God's laws, and through Christ I have been saved from death.

It is that awesome joy and gratefulness that compels me to live for and obey God. Therefore I walk in His Righteousness, Not my own.

Until you realize and accept these Biblical truths, you will remain without God and will be subject to His Righteous judgment. You will remain a 'false convert' leading others away from God and into Evil's hand. Woe to those that do that!

thanks for allowing me time on your site. May God Bless you and draw you closer to the real Him.

Thanks for your response. I appreciate your views and I do take it all in. Again, like I said, "in my beliefs" and which I have reinforced in my book with biblical passages, I believe that God saved us all.

We are going to keep sinning. Again...and again...and again...

The foundation of my intimacy with my partner is "love". To me, this is not evil.

To you, it is. Different beliefs. That's fine.

With all my heart, and my soul, I believe that God accepts me 'as is'. I am grateful. I love Jesus, and appreciate with ALL my heart that He has died for me, and for you...to save us.

Thank you for admitting that you are a sinner too. We all are. We all share the shortcomings of Christ. We can't all be perfect, but we can all be loved.

Mark, she did answer your question, only you are so focused on how you will respond that you aren't even reading what she wrote.

FOUNDATION: LoveREASON: Because God and Jesus gave it to us as a gift to share with one another at our own free will.EXAMPLE: Her relationship.

I don't know how she could have been more clear!

Maybe you should focus less on what two gay, straight, married, unmarried, etc. consenting adults do when they fall in love.

FYI: Last I heard, 70% of child molesters are admitedly straight men. Perhaps gay people should start lumping all heterosexuals into that 70% and claim that ALL heteros are molesters...how do you think that would feel?

my last comment Deb, thanks for being kind with me.you say God's our father who has unconditional love. That means----love without conditions

Deb, listen to me sister, that is a lie! That is a Lie Straight from the depeths of Hell! God's love and kingdom is Open to all, but one MUST come to the cross and Change! Make no mistake, we will still sin, but we will really Hurt and Repent when we do. As we grow closer in Christ, we will learn to Hate Sin as much as God does.

Mark: Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7...Is that a lie? God IS love. If you read the passages from Corinthians, you can see how unconditional love is. God is based on love. That is not a lie, Mark. He loves us unconditionally. It's written. We're human, therefore we sin. We all do, but remember, God is a loving and forgiving God. I'm not trying to pursuade your beliefs Mark, but I feel sad that you seem to have this view of God as an ugly and hateful master. He's not. At least, that's what "I believe", and will always believe.

I believe God loves YOU unconditionally. He sees past your flaws and shortcomings, as He sees past mine. In the end, you'll see how loving God really is. Even 'right now', you can see how God is all about love if you draw closer to Him.

Love to you...and please pray about what I said too. Again, I am taking in what you say as well, and praying on it too. I think your thoughts are insightful, but they are a bit scary to me. I understand where you are coming from though--I really do.

Deb, Yes indeed God is love. Yes it is unconditional in the sense He will forgive any and all sins. My point, which I probably was not clear enough, is that He does require a change of heart which is acted upon and evident in our Lives.I am not feared into His arms, I am loved and welcomed into His arms, because He showed me how evil I am(His laws and boundaries for our lives), and paid my due penalty. That is Godly love! It has nothing, and I repeat nothing to do with earthly love which is confused with our lusts(sin).

I understand we all sin. Going to heaven and being a disciple of Christ, is never about minimizing sin. God HATES sin, it COST HIM HIS SON. Lets Never take that for granted, ok? If people do, they will spend eternity away from God..Hell, that is a fact, that is a message from God Himself, the living Christ.

Deb said... "in my beliefs" and which I have reinforced in my book with biblical passages, I believe that God saved us all.

OMG - Is this chick really a “Christian” who is an author of a book? Holy Mary mother of God! Good grief - what has Christianity resorted to?

What “biblical” passages could she possibly use to support this kind of blasphemy?

God's our father who has unconditional love. That means----love without conditions. He is capable of accepting those who struggle more than others...With all my heart, and my soul, I believe that God accepts me 'as is'. I am grateful.

According to Deb’s “beliefs” God's has unconditional love which means He must accept all the child molesters, fornicators, adulterers and rapists ‘as is’ too. It must be okay for them to continue what they are doing since we all are humans who sin and some just struggle more than others. God must just freely offer His love and forgiveness for all people of all lifestyles, even if you don’t repent. Jesus died for the sins of mankind so we can ALL continue sinning - Yippy! Thanks Jesus!

The new Christianity: “Love without conditions” - Sounds like a heck of a bargain, where do I sign up?

By observing these comments it doesn’t seem like Deb struggles with her “sin” all that much since according to her own “beliefs” God accepts her ‘as is’ even though she defies Him by living in perversion.

If the foundation of her intimacy with her partner is "love" – it is a foundation build on lies and quicksand that will no doubt crumble to the ground.

Not all Christians are extremists, Deb. All extremists are dangerous, however, regardless of what their religion might be. Only you, and you alone, can know what your relationship with the Lord is. For anyone to tell you differently is the same thing as passing judgment. All sin is equal in God's eyes, none greater than another, and we're all sinners. But God's love is infinite. He sent us Jesus as His new covenant with His people, and Jesus tells us that the greatest thing we can do is to love one another. Period.

There are those who would have us live in fear of God. If you worship because you're afraid, that isn't faith. There are those who attack homosexuals because it makes them feel "right" and they'll tell you they're not being a bigot, nor are they passing judegment because they're just telling you the truth. They can tell themselves whatever they need to in order to sleep at night, but the fact is, they are equally as guilty of sinning as they accuse you of being. Only God decides. Jesus never speaks of homosexuality, not even once. Does that mean He is accepting? Maybe, maybe not. But what we do know is that He tells us to love one another, help each other ,feed the hungry, heal the sick, and in general, just take care of one another. People will wrap their hatred in the cloak of Christianity and feel justified for passing judgement. They're too busy being "right" to understand that God's love for us is greater than anything we can even fathom. All of us. We're all sinners, and He loves us anyway. Find comfort in that.

You're quite welcome. Unfortunately, I know some of those who torment you all too well. They stalked me for a while, sent me threatening emails etc. Very Christian of them, huh? And they did this because I dared to disagree with their brand of Christianity. They called me a heretic and continually tried to get into a war of Bible verses to show that they were better Christians than I am. I refuse to do that. I will not use the Bible as a weapon against anyone just to prove that I am right. I will absolutely quote scripture when I think it is appropriate, but to use it to be that arrogant? Nope. No thanks. Don't let them get to you. Eventually, they crawl back under their rocks and post lengthy blog posts just to hear themselves speak and to show how righteous they are. They beg for attention, but don't give it to them. They don't have the power to question your relationship with God. If they somehow think they do, they're breaking some of the rules all by themselves. Tell them what I used to tell them....before you try to remove the speck from my eye, kindly remove the log from your own.

It's sad that they waste their time arguing over 'beliefs'. It must be really stressful for them to put all that negative energy into someone else's life and beliefs. I really feel that God has a purpose for each individual. Each person has their own relationship with God. Who can argue with that?

Deb, What an absolutely moving post. I believe we are born either straight or gay- there is no choice. I have friends who are gay/lesbian who have ALWAYS known they were gay. They, too, have never been wronged by a man, or a woman, nor were they molested. It kills me that people make such assumptions about others.

The next time someone asks you if you're gay because you were molested by a woman, ask them if they're straight because they were molested by someone of the opposite sex!

We were talking about this with some people the other day and one of the guys said, to the dismay of the other guys, that he thought we are all percentages of homo/hetero. That he thinks that anyone who says they are 100% something are just kidding themselves. That in nature, we'd all be curious and experiment without judgement. I think he is right.

i seriously hate reading the nasty comments you get sometimes concerning this issue. seems you can't even write one post about your sexual orientation without getting the nasty comments.

i write stuff about making out with people, doing it, obsession with s&m etc...not often...but every now and then...and only once did i get a mean comment..and it wasn't even real...he totally backed off almost immediately.

Hienjoy your writing which I read now and then. This was a good post but two words stood out above the others and made me go "ARGH"..the words..."homosexual lifestyle". I hate those words. I find they fuel more anti-gay attacks. I don't see where gay lifestyles are any different than straight lifestyles. Gays works, play, have houses, pay bills, etc just like any straight person. So how is their lifestyle different and why does it need that label? I see those two words as fighting words! that lead to anti gay attacks. Just my badly written two cents.Not meant to offend.

i know it is kind of late but i just came across this and would like to say a few things.

I dont hate homosexuals, and I dont agree with those who hate homosexuals

first off- i have astounding respect for you... i'm sure you already know that you have huge amounts of courage to do what you're doing. I also love how have discovered that God really does love you no matter what. This is basically the bottom line of life, that God loves EVERYONE. like you said, this is why He died on the cross. I wasn't sure if you were insinuating that homosexuality is a sin and that God loves you in spite of it, as you compared it to God loving everyone who is imperfect. So I don't want to go out on a limb and make the bold statement that it is a sin, but if this is what you were insinuating, then what's the next step? You mentioned God loving us many times, well God's love is so consuming that all we have within ourselves, every fiber within us, responds by reciprocating that love back to Him. What does this mean? In turn, we reciprocate His love to all of His creation as well. This is why I cannot stress enough how the "Christians" who merely hold the name and Don't live a Christian lifestyle, are the ones who bash on homosexuality. If you understand God's love, you will NEVER say God and hate in the same sentence! Or anything that implies God not being loving- this is His very nature. What else stems from God's love? Aiming for perfection. Our goal is to spend our lives on earth shooting for perfection, because we love Him and don't want to settle into sinning just because we are weak but we should strive for perfection in His name. So daily, all of us humans battle our imperfections for our love for God. This might be the next step to your relationship with Him. If indeed you come to your own conclusion (not my saying) that homosexuality is a sin, or not godly in some way, maybe trying to deal with your own imperfection for God's sake will be what you decide to do. I'm not telling you to trash your own desires and what you've known all your life, I don't know your situation and can't speak for you. As long as there is no stagnant attitude in your goal of perfection, as long as you make your own pure effort to remove things which God may not like, you will have pleased Him. If you don't do this, by no means does He hate you or not love you, it's just a good way of expressing your love for Him. Just something for you to ponder about, and I pray that I didn't offend you. I also am battling my own imperfections. Although it may not be homosexuality, it makes me not an inch better than you but probably worse than you.

About Me

Debra Pasquella is the author of A Prayer Away From Healing, freelance blogger & creator of Gays & Lesbians of Faith. Content is sometimes opinionated, controversial, offensive or inspiring. That’s all up to you. An open mind is required. Ask your doctor if this blog’s right for you.