CATHERINE'S SOAPBOXMy thoughts have been towards the devalued but assumed work of Mothers in our society. It is assumed women know how to birth, breastfeed, mother...and yet because we have devalued this things, isolating them from general society, women are denied the opportunity to observe and actually learn these skills. 'Maternal Instinct', according to Vanessa Olorenshow (p100 Liberating Motherhood):

"suggests that women simply know how to care for babies, know how to breastfeed and know how to raise young children. For starters, it lets the men off the hook in terms of putting in the effort to bond with and care for children. From a patriarchal perspective, notions of maternal instinct and essential feminine qualities have been used to oppress mothers into a corset-like gender role of nurture, home and exclusion from public life and education. Further, they deny the supreme amount of effort, patience strength and courage which goes into caring for babies and young children, and the learning on the job, in small steps. Most fundamentally, it underestimates the degree to which we learn through example, culture and childhood experiences about how to mother."

Doulaing and breastfeeding support are roles that aim to fill this gap. A gap created through this exclusion of mothering from general society, over many generations, through the medicalisation of pregnancy and birth. A gap that has left us valuing medical assistance and assuming the rest will follow.

If I ruled the world:

We would reframe 'consent' to be 'decision making'.

Make independent midwifery less restrictive (for midwives and in turn mothers).

Increase continuity of care midwifery.

Rethink and expand rural services.

And all women would be offered a Government funded $100 voucher to use towards childbirth ed or doula support similar to the 'active kids' program

Fit Your Own Mask First offers you an insightful TEDTALK that may just blow your mind! It addresses the balance of 'needs' and 'wants' when dealing with our children. I also offer you further resources to help you explore this new way of thinking.This one looks at managing the housework.

NEW IN RESOURCES: This month, I have added this awesome position paper from The Ontario Public Health Association. It looks at Informed Decision Making, and 'Decision Tools'. My book is a "wonderful guide"...one of the authors (Deanna Stirling) said so! It is a very comprehensive decision making tool. I also added the 'Complementary therapies' paper which showed that private childbirth education improves outcomes.Access the resources page here

Have you ever wondered about lactation cookies? This article looks into whether or not they are helpful.

It was this quote that caught me from this article by Ginger Gorman asking about the 'pregnancy police':"It's never about you and what you've decided to do. It's always about them."People want you to validate their own choices. So if you make a choice different to them ... they often make you try and feel bad about it."

The desire to become a mother is an emotional time, for better or for worse. Trying To Concieve can become an obsessive and desperate, all consuming, time and the longer it takes the deeper the despair sets in. Turning to professionals for help, filled with hope, but is it false hope? (Ginger Gorman on IVF ).

I was also captured by a twitterer asking what happens to the frozen embryos if you die. Apparently, in Australia, from 2004 onwards you must document what will happen in various circumstances (including relationship breakdown). If you wish to donate your embryos, you must undergo counselling to ensure you are fully aware of the enormity of doing so. The ethics seem uncertain, I guess the technology is moving faster than we can grasp it. It gets complicated when several donations are involved. It gets murky when we view embryo donation like adoption. There is a lot to consider.

Which led me to this piece about 'How to find out Anything from Anyone?'. Leaving out a key piece of information, whether intentionally or not, impedes informed decision making. If not all info is given, not all options are on the table. How do you know if you are getting all the info?

Katherine Maybe wrote this blog: "Birth planning goes far beyond a written document. Birth planning is about conversations, informed choice, empowering women. Its about dignity and respect. Its about ensuring that women are aware of their options."

This cochrane review on 'Massage, reflexology and other manual methods for managing pain in labour'. If you find it works, do it!

April 4th was International Day for Maternal Health and Rights. This post about Human Rights in Childbirth also contains a link to the very awesome talk I attended in Sydney in March. It is $7 to view, and the money goes toward getting the very awesome Birth Time documentary produced.

What I'm ReadingAs always, I have several books on the go. These are some I am finding particularly interesting.

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Catherine is a member of the Doula Network Australia

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