"...nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself..."

This is not a criminal case. Fifth amendment right does not apply. That being said, any student certainly has the right to call bullshiat on a survey and refuse to answer. It's just not a bill of rights issue.

Sounds like a second amendment solution is needed, to me.

Click-click

I'd assert my 3rd Amendment rights.

"I'm pleading the 3rd.""You mean the 5th?""Nope, the 3rd.""The 3rd Amendment has absolutely nothing to do with this survey!""Exactly. And this survey has absolutely nothing to do with education."

DerAppie:Vangor: On any forms I have given my students, I have always assured them of the right to privacy either by explicitly stating any forms with possibly embarrassing data is anonymous or lack of requirement to complete forms with marked data. Neither is a Fifth Amendment rights issue, merely treating people with the respect deserved. You know what has happened? In well over a thousand forms, no one has declined to answer honestly.

Everyone answered honestly? And you know this because they told you?

Probably because students have the guile and subtly of mentally-retarded budgies, but all think they are Machiavellian satirists. Spotting bullshiat is rather easy. So easy, in fact, that I often want to smack them for how badly they lie - I feel insulted that they don't show me the respect to offer up a lie that at least would possibly fool a third-grader. I deal with college kids, but do you realize how many still trot out "Granny died" when exams come up? And the moral outrage if I suggest proof (though I rarely do anymore, since any yahoo with a color printer can pop out one of those funeral home souvenir novelty Psalm 23 cards)? Sometimes I get "Uncle Bob died", but Granny is the go-to gal, and if all these kids are telling the truth, I have the amazing ability to plan exams and paper due dates on the future death dates of many, many grandmothers - I am the Bane of Blue Hairs.

/I have serious toyed with announcing on the first day of a new semester that the students need to tell their grandmothers to be especially careful around the exam dates, as their lives are in mortal peril at those times.//My boss told me this was (a) tacky, and (b) unprofessional

Bertalmio was outraged. The 2002 graduate, who took one class with Dryden, credits him with teaching him how to examine positions and make logical arguments, no matter where one stands politically."Back it up - give me evidence," is what Dryden taught, Bertalmio said.

phalamir:Probably because students have the guile and subtly of mentally-retarded budgies, but all think they are Machiavellian satirists. Spotting bullshiat is rather easy. So easy, in fact, that I often want to smack them for how badly they lie - I feel insulted that they don't show me the respect to offer up a lie that at least would possibly fool a third-grader.

My stepdaughter fit that description perfectly. She was one of the worse liars that I ever had the displeasure of listening to. It wasn't just the completely unbelievable BS that came out of her mouth, she also had a certain tone of voice that she used whenever she was lying and ONLY when she was lying. I believe the thinking is, "if I act very serious he'll believe me." Now I understand what my dad meant by "don't use that tone with me!"

After being a parent to her, I called my dad up and asked him why he let me live and apologized for the crap I put him through.

There was an "anonymous" survey at my high school about student drug use. For a lark I checked ALL the boxes.... Over a decade afterwards there was a blood drive at work. I hadn't been able to donate blood because of a couple of tattoos during my 20s, and was looking forward giving. They ran my ID and said I couldn't donate. I asked why and they said they couldn't tell me but if I filled out a form I'd receive the reason in the mail. Filled out the form and two months later received a letter saying I was in their database as an intravenous drug user....

We had an anonymous survey like this in 9th grade. I was actually a very buttoned-up person and didn't drink/do drugs/do anything really, but I answered it very jokingly. I wish I could remember my exact answers because they were funny, but when it asked if you drank, I would write things like how difficult it was to find a good wine, and that I enjoyed a nice campari cocktail on the veranda, etc.

Indolent:FTFA: "The survey is part of measuring how students meet the social-emotional learning standards set by the state."

Social-emotional learning standards? WTF is that about?

Do you act like a normal person of your age-group. "Social" meaning you can interact with others in an appropriate manner, and "emotional" that your emotional responses are appropriate to situations. If, upon meeting a person for the first time, you scream in homicidal rage and start fling your own feces at them, yelling "I will gut you with my bare hands and then use your stomach as a cum-receptacle", you have not met the social-emotional learning standards (not even of pre-K {unless your pre-K is run by Tartars}).

It is jargon-speak for socialization, which schools are supposed to impart unto students