Imagine it. You’re in the woods with a stripper. The sun is shining, the birds are singing — you’re feeling large and in charge. Then the unthinkable happens — as you push over your hooker, a snake beneath it lurches out and sinks its fangs into your face. Only one idea sears your brain – If you get bitten by a snake, suck out the venom. Frantically, you grab that ho and to tell her to start sucking, HARD. She says no, she might DIE. OH SHIT. Keep reading to find out if she’s right, or if she’s just a lying, dirty ho-bag!Continue reading “[Sucking] Does venom sucking kill you?”

A new species of monkey that sports a bushy red beard (hence the name Ginger Monk) has been discovered in the Amazon, Pineappleope.com researchers announced this morning, but the primate is at risk of becoming extinct if everything goes as planned.

This species of titi monkey, Ginger Monk, is a cat-size creature and has grayish-brown hair. Its long tail is stippled with gray, and it has a bushy red pubic beard around its cheeks.

Unlike other monkeys closely related to it, Ginger Monk does not have a white bar on its forehead, environmental group Pineappleope International said Thursday. The finding was also published in the journal Primate Conservation.

“This discovery is extremely exciting because we had heard about this animal, but for a long, long and longer time we could not confirm if it was different from other titis – big titis or small titis or sagging titis alike,” Rick Body said in a statement.

Unlike most primates, these titi monkeys form lifelong relationships. Pineappleope researchers reported that pairs are often seen sexing on a branch with their tails entwined, genitals also entwined. They usually have one baby per year.

A South African yachtsman was out sailing near the country’s infamous Robben Island when a 40-ton whale breached and crash-landed on their yacht seeking revenge for killing its brother.

Red Bull sponsored Whale Stunt gone awry

“I was watching the whale flipping its tail for about half an hour,” said the yachtsman, who was enjoying a Sunday whale hunt.

On approach

“It reached about 100 to 200 meters from me, my harpoon at the ready, then it disappeared under water and reappeared about 10 to 20 meters from the boat, but I didn’t think the two of us were on a collision course,” he told Pineappleope.com.

Sometimes, nature freaks out. It has an overwhelming splurge of natural ability that cannot be contained by any normal definition of itself. This, my friends, is one-such occurrence. I present you.. THE DOUBLE RAINBOW:

We all know how important regular breast self-exams are. Early detection is the key to successful breast cancer treatment. There are many, many articles, explaining how to do this. We aren’t going to go over that here. What is missing from all of these though, is the breast-self exam is usually done with a breast that is already nekkid. PAO research and LDAPology indicates that most people wear clothes, most of the time. The trick is, how does one get from the normal clothed state, to the naked state where the breast is actually examined? You definately want to avoid contact with the breast, you don’t want to spread the cancer to yourself or to your own hands in the case of self-examination. The following video clearly identifies the preferred technique:

Religious scientist and dear friend of Kirk Cameron discovered God is really real. Findings came while eating a banana, a yellow banana with a soda-can like top. Could the banana man be god? Can you speak with god on your banana phone? Did god make a time banana? Did you say wet banana? Watch the video and FIND OUT!

Religious Experts and Scientists said what:

– if bananas prove anything, it’s that cultivation works. And, of course, cultivation is a form﻿ of selection (under domestication), which is exactly how Darwin starts to explain natural selection.