Don Ready is called “The Goods” for a reason. He’s one great salesman. As David Spade would say, he could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves. Ready is a salesman for hire, and the Selleck family from Temecula, Arizona has hired him and his crew to save their car lot. Ready and his crew take on the impossible mission of selling over 200 cars over July 4th weekend. That’s the entire plot behind the ridiculous comedy “The Goods: Live Hard. Sell Hard.” While it sounds like it could be entertaining, take this reviewer’s word that it isn’t.

“The Goods” is fashioned as a comedy in the vein of Will Ferrell smash hits like “Anchorman” and “Talledega Nights”. The problem is, while those films realized the sheer stupidity of their content and played it accordingly, “The Goods” comes off as a far more vulgar, second rate version of these films that tries to string together a serious side plot involving Ready and his family background. In fact, Ferrell himself makes a two scene cameo in “The Goods”, and it’s a reminder of how these films can be humorous if done correctly. Unfortunately, that’s not the case here as it looks like the movie was put together in about a week, substituting smart or slapstick comedy with vulgar comments that are supposed to make the viewer laugh. There are a few funny moments, but they’re spaced out between long spans of nothing but jokes that fall laughless.

This film isn’t good from a moviemaking standpoint, and from a Christian viewer’s standpoint it’s even worse. Don and his crew hang out in strip clubs as well as act and speak in such vulgar manners that it’s sometimes just tough to watch. More so, there’s not one single redeeming value in “The Goods” that I could recommend. Unfunny, useless, and almost completely unwatchable, “The Goods” doesn’t deliver what it promises.

Negative—The review given to this movie is very accurate. I took a friend to this movie believing that it would be a comedy similar to some of Will Ferrell’s material and that the theme of a car sales business had not been often used to create comedy and poke fun at many of the questionable sales tactics some persons use to sell cars. That’s what I thought we were going to see. Finally, after 20 minutes into the movie, we left because the film to that point had basically been pornography with some clothes on and absolutely useless crude language disguised as comedy. I was embarrassed that I had taken a friend to this movie. I saw no value in this movie, even comical value. Disappointment that the possible story line the film could have followed and didn’t is how I felt when leaving. My Ratings: Moral rating: Extremely Offensive / Moviemaking quality: 2½—Robert, age 45 (USA)