Sure, why not? I've been reading up on blogs on making book trailers. I will just keep feedback in mind for a version two later this year when I cut a second version.

I will make the next one from scratch with a different editing program. This one was made with Adobe Premiere Elements. I'm thinking of making the next with Magix Vegas Pro. And, later a third version with either iMovie or Final Cut X. Final Cut Pro X is on my shopping list for some time this year.

Some technical editing notes:
- the crossfade at 0:45 is not really a crossfade: the second shot suddenly appear while the first one is already fading. It looks a bit sloppy.
- the stairway starts staticly and ends almost staticly: that more or less nullifies the fear you want to show.
- ever watched a real bat fly? Their wings move really fast.
- your end screen is way too short to read the info: give people time to read an remember.
- I think the coffin opening is too long on the start side

As for the story
- the voice-over says more or less the same thing twice: the second time 'vampire' is replaced with 'supernatural'. This makes is too slow exposition. (I would cut the first half of it.)
- you have the running first and then you see the 'escape from the coffin'. Doesn't feel logical.

I could also say that the look of the footage is all over the place, but I know you are using the means you have, so I kept to some points you actually can use in the edit.

So, you would have the coffin opening before the running up the castle stairs? Doable for the second version. Reduce the narration to eliminate repetition? Okay.

I have more than one cut of running up the castle stairs. I will try another cut for the next version. However, that was a difficult shoot literally dodging tourists who were coming down the stairs as I was trying to shoot. Should I add camera shake to the staircase footage?

Change the transition at 45 seconds may be the best solution.

What's coming out of the coffin is vampire smoke showing the vampires are coming. And, the final graveyard scene are a hoard of vampires in their bat forms. My books have the old school vampires who are big on shape shifting, unlike modern vampires.

Besides WalterB's input and feedback I also got feedback at work from a friend who is a DJ away from his day job. He suggested that I should come up with a page peel effect to give the feel that this trailer is for books as well as a vampire story. Thus, I worked in the page peels where I thought they would work best.