I figured writing things out would be good for me to get events recorded and out of my mind, so to speak. Really, I should have started doing this sooner, but better late than never, right?

It’s closing in on a year since I’ve come to the coast. I can honestly say that the past several months have been… Exciting… Different… I’m not sure how else to put it. I’ve come a long way in a short amount of time, thanks to the people I’ve met and wanting to move past what happened. Those memories of the tower and… Him do still linger, but it’s starting to feel less real and more like a bad dream with every passing day. I know I’ve not been easy to deal with at times, but I am truly thankful for my friends here.

The people I’ve met have been nothing short of captivating. All of them, really. Even the ones I’ve had less favorable interactions with have been interesting, but the ones I call friends… Ghyslain, Indigo, Nathan, Beladra, Caleth, Jadoth, Gemma, Layne, Teris, so many faces I can’t think to name them all! I think I might drive them mad at times by trying to be helpful, but I just want them to know I adore them because they’ve done more for me than they’ll likely ever know. I do hope I see Ghyslain and Indigo again. They were some of my first friends coming to the Coast. For now, I’m very thankful to see Beladra and Caleth returned. Beladra, especially for Nathan’s sake. I worried for him a great deal, but… I know he’ll be alright with her return. They deserve to be happy together and I adore them both like... Well, family, I suppose.

And there’s Dove. My lovely Dove. I don’t know which gods I must thank for her, but I would gladly do so. I’ve never known someone so patient or calm or just… Truly lovely inside and out. She makes me want to be a better self. I’m her Strange Mage, after all.

What else is there, really? Oh, I’ve started a job with the Darius Holding Company officially, though they’re restructuring to a proper house. I’ve the title of House Mage and I enjoy the people I’ve met through the Company so far.

I have come quite a way since I first set foot outside of that tower, and for the first time in what feels like forever, I’m starting to look ahead with excitement.

On the following page is a detailed drawing of what looks to be a very lovely little brown bat

Today wound up being somewhat eventful after writing the first journal entry. I got to go on an expedition into the Greypeaks with Ferrick, Lannia, and some others. Ferrick is trying, but I rather like him. Something about him reminds me of Ghyslain, but... More jovial? I’m not sure, but he’s a strange druid.

After the expedition, I was exhausted and rested for a while, only to find myself later investigating a crypt fire in the graveyard outside of the Gates with another group of people. Of course, the fire wasn’t simply just a fire, but some sort of orb that warped reality around itself to bring forth shadows to attack us. Dimitry tried to overtake it with his own will, but it vanished and we left before the crypt collapsed.

As bad as this might sound, I was both relieved and disappointed to find that orb. The man who alerted us to the incident was screaming over a little box… I suspected a phylactery, which could have been destroyed if its owner wasn’t in the process of retrieving it.

We later found a spirit sitting atop the remains playing a violin…. I’ll have to keep an eye on Teris over the next few days, speaking of which. Whatever occurred seems to have him shaken up. The spirit seemed to know him, and it was not happy.
This might seem like an unusual entry, but… I’m certain as this journal goes on, I’ll be documenting far stranger events.

The following couple of pages are sketches of a small feykin making various faces

Yesterday was the Darius Hol Darius House recovery expedition. Greypeaks went far more smoothly this time, but I would blame that on our numbers this time around. The last instance of me going into the Greypeaks involved a fight with the Baalor that felt like it lasted an eternity! None of us were properly prepared to fight a fiend, but it did go down eventually! Nobody really talked too much, but I suspect it had to do with the fact that we were all really focused on the task at hand.

Afterwards, there was a discussion about necromancers that I wished to avoid, so I tried to simply ignore it. I did catch pieces of it despite my best intentions, however, and was made aware that a necromancer was upset over losing their skeletal slave and vowed to hunt us all down because one of our party put the poor creature to rest. The cheek of a bastard like that! I’d have liked to see the monster try it! It would have been a mercy killing for someone like that…

Teris was worried about us setting out, as he tends to be, but I assured him and reassured him that we’d be okay. His fearfulness of setting out like I tend to has a habit of spreading over to his fear of his friends. This coupled with the incident a night prior only exacerbates that worry in him. I wonder if Dove needs to increase his medication? All I can do is keep an eye on him, though I may have to stop asking him to the Muse, considering he’s uncomfortable there. Also… I found out recently that the Darius brothers apparently have a less than pleasant history with Teris that stems from before I arrived. All I can really do at this point is really work on staying patient with him and trying to juggle my time accordingly, though I’m aware that I have my own… Problems that I’m still working on, myself.

Dealing with everything like this, however, has made me appreciate Dove’s seemingly boundless patience that much more. How does she manage all of this?

The following page has several sketches an elven woman with long hair and gown

So I should probably stop playing dice at the Muse for awhile. It seems that I’ve a habit of attracting people’s more… Intimate dares. Also, honied dates are possibly the most disgusting thing I’ve ever had in my mouth, and considering what has happened during dissections with Holton, that’s… Saying a lot. Thankfully, Dove doesn’t seem annoyed with me so much as concerned that I’ve been drinking as I have. But it’s nice to have fun and not… Think for a bit. I needed the down time. That said, Fingal is not the sort of drinking companion I should probably entertain, considering his outburst towards Reiker the other evening. Rather distasteful.

Beladra asked me a personal question, more of a favor, but… I’m not sure that carrying it out would be okay. I’m afraid to broach the subject with Nathan considering how he tends to assume I’m just trying to ‘fix’ him. I think I might need to just… Let this one pass. It’s between them. Granted, I do agree with Bel that the world needs more people like Nathan in it.

Teris seems to be doing better, on a lighter note! Hopefully he keeps this up… He deserves it and I do hate to see his heart and mind so burdened. It reminds me a lot of myself and… I think that tends to try my patience significantly more than it would with others. Granted, I’m still learning more about his past before I arrived and it’s becoming clear that he was part of something incredibly foul, though apparently against his will. I hope he’ll forgive himself eventually for what happened, whatever it was.

It occurs to me that my friends tend to occupy my thoughts a great deal. I suppose I don’t really like thinking about myself too much.

On the next few pages are several small figure sketches under a thin layer of fairy dust. One in particular stands out as it has been boxed in and had the background lightly shaded in. It's clear it's a sketch of a feykin playing with a shirt button.

I’ve neglected this a few days, certainly. In my defense, not much has really happened. I got a tad annoyed with Teris. Apparently he decided to speak on my behalf at the Muse while I had stepped out for a moment, which was later followed with an attempt to lure me away with a sending that I’m still not certain was entirely true. I can’t believe that the woman wouldn’t have agreed to meet him at the Muse or the Anchor had he asked. The bright side to this is that he seems to have worked out things with Fingal, so… Silver linings and all.

Lately, while spending time at the Halls waiting to see Dove, I’ve been speaking with some of the acolytes, notably the ones who follow Lliira and Hanali Cenali. I… It’s hard to explain, but speaking with them feels odd, but not bad odd. I haven’t really talked with anyone else about it, I’m still not really sure what it means for me. Oh gods, speaking of such things, I should be more diligent in speaking with members of the Church of Mystra! I’ve completely let that slip by… Regardless of my duties as House Mage, I do have a duty to Her as a mage, I suppose.

So much going on, and yet nothing seems to be happening. Only on the Coast, it would seem.

The following pages are covered with random sketches and scribbles of mundane objects. It looks like he was sitting in a bar as he sketched a fair portion of them, judging from the number of bottles.

I’ve decided to pick this back up again as things are happening. Things I cannot discuss even to myself on this page… It’s sickening and frustrating and… I’m scared. Gods that be, there’s no other word for it. There’s a deep pit of fear in my gut that I can’t talk to anyone about. I just want to be done with this, but I have a feeling I’ll lose people I love dearly before this is all said and done. I don’t know what to do except pray that this isn’t as bad as I feel it might be. And the kicker to all of this is that what I’m doing may well be making things so much worse.

This is a nightmare. I’m not sure how much more of it I can take. I feel alone again. I can’t help my friends, and I can’t be helped right now. This journal is the only thing I feel I can really turn to, and even then, I tread a thin line. But I did this to myself out of fear and desperation.

It doesn't mean anything, but for anything that happens because of me, Gods, I am sorry.

There are several doodles, all little more than frantic scribbles of vague forms. It's as if attempts to draw were thwarted by an anxious hand.