Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

STBX Keeps the kids clothes

is it just me or has other people experienced the spouse returning the kids with out coats and shoes? I send them well dressed and they are returned in seasonally inappropriate clothes. It is winter and they will be returned in summer clothes. I assume this is designed to anger me.

When I finally had no shoes for the baby I did really get upset. The STBX told me that it was not his problem and I should go out and buy more. I did. To be nice I gave him really nice clothes so the kids would stop being returned looking like orphans. It did not help. If I bring this up to the judge his response will be "I do not know what she is talking about".

I do not want to play this game. I do not want to be like him. What I am learning is that divorce is a lot like being married.

I look forward to that new life I see in my head. The one where the person I am dealing with is my equal and not a child. This was a man I loved and wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Hmm. Guess there is a lesson here for me. I am learning so much about myself. Guess I should thank him for being such a great teacher.

My STBX has returned my kids without their sports equipment, with big rips in their nice clothing, without socks, with a suitcase which was packed with an open container of liquid in it....you name it. I figure it is like a child trying to get attention.

I am struggling with this issue as well. It becomes a big pain but you ave to write down the things you sent them with so that you know what needs to be returned. I tend not to pay attention until one of the kids need something that he has still.

not sure if finding out how common this is helps. but, i guess it gives me some perspective. i just provide all of the clothes, stuff for preschool and presents. it is weird because he is hypercritical of everything that i do. i honestly think that he is completely unaware of what an ass he is. i guess that is what makes him selfish.

good point about learning about yourself, though. i have learned how strong, kind and resilient i am.

We have this issue especially during the winter. My kids are always coming home without their snow gear. I don't allow my kids to bring any toys over there knowing they will not return. My ex even had my son steal gift cards out of my purse that I had gotten for the kids for birthday gifts. They came from his family so he felt he was entitled to them. You are right, for some reason we married children.

good suggestion, a journal. also take pictures a few times, so that he can't say i dont know what she is talking about. also, a friend of mine went through this, i suggested go to the salvation army, buy them clothes to where over his house and that way it's less expensive and you don't have to worry about them.

I wasn't getting cs and asked my ex if he would get the kids some warmer clothes. He did but the catch was the clothes he bought had to stay as his house. So my kids basically have two sets of clothes. I can count on 8 yr.old to bring her clothes home but put 3 ys. old in play clothes. I hate the world we and our children step into when we get a divorce.

It got to the point where I just gave up dealing with the missing clothing, garbage bags full of dirty clothes and her not sending boots because I didn't pay half (she didn't tell me she bought them) so I told her enough. I went out...with the help of family...and now have clothes for them at both homes.

my last partner's ex did this bullshit all of the time. he'd bring him in a tiny fall jacket when there was snow on the ground. no hat, no mittens. we documented it every time, only to find out that it was not applicable at all.

i think that when men are then required to take care of the kids when the divorce process starts, that they're severley lacking in skill, from not participating much in the nurturing process.

my son is dealing with this issue. His ex &quot;loses&quot; things. He bought his daughter an adorable pair of crocks...she came back from Momma's missing one. She sends her home missing clothing, filthy. Now my son only sends his daughter with clothing he doesn't care if the ex &quot;loses&quot;. Any good clothing that family members give as gifts...stay at HIS house.

I can't imagine how his ex loses so much stuff. She has a tiny one bedroom apartment. ARe there socks and shirts and shoes all over the place?

I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????

A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...

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