COUNSELLING CORNER

Quit Blaming! Discover Yourself!

By Oladotun 0. Fadeyiye

Our day to day struggle for survival could be tiresome and frustrating, and at times we tend to apportion blame on someone or some people for our woes and predicament. But the point is, life is what you make out of it. Never be in the habit of saying you are at disadvantaged when you can always take your destiny in your hands. I have heard lots of people saying “I never had good up bringing that’s my problem” “Had it been my parents were not poor I wouldn’t be this way” My background ruined my life” and so many and so forth.

The truth is your background or how you were born has nothing to do with your purpose in life! I remember a friend who is fond of blaming God for being born in a poor home. Husbands blame wives, wives blame their husbands. Citizens blame President, President blames Governors and senators. Students blame Teachers etc. we just love to blame others to justify ourselves, situation and plights. That is just the typical nature of men. We often forget to focus on what matters to our destiny and get distracted by irrelevant things thereby making us purposeless being.

Most great men that have ever lived never had good beginning or famous background as the case may be. Shakespeare was not from a rich background yet his great works outlived him. Isaac Newton, Albert Einstein, Abraham Lincoln and even Jesus Christ, who was born in a Manger, I bet you know what manger is? a place where horses and cattle are kept and fed in medieval times, just Imagine how the place would look then.

According to biblical account of birth of Jesus Christ, there were no nurse or doctor to attend to His mother, Mary during labour. Yet, Jesus lived a fulfilled life here on earth, wrought so many miracles, healed people with infirmities and even fed people with words of wisdom and all these He did in His early thirties. His Father was just an obscure local carpenter, yet all these limitations as we might call it could not stop Jesus purpose here on earth. He died at age 33 and left most powerful legacy ever!!! He became the author and finisher of all Christians fateful worldwide!

Over the years, I have been inspired by lives of great people who were born physically challenged yet against all odds became icons and role models to able bodied people. The likes of Steven Wonder, Franklin Roosevelt and Ray Charles amongst others inspire me a great deal each time I read about their stories.

As a matter of fact, When talking about the famous disabled people the first name that comes to the mind is that of the great Albert Einstein. Albert Einstein who is the greatest scientist of the twentieth century and the greatest physicist of all time had a learning disability in the early parts of his life. Till the age of three he could not speak and was severely dyslexic and autistic.
As he grew older he started to focus on the only thing he was exceptional at and that was mathematics. Soon he fought his disability and entered into the world of theoretical physics where he changed the face of physics and science forever. His theory of relativity is said to be the most revolutionary theory of physics. He won a Nobel Prize for his photoelectric effect theory in 1921.

Another great personality who was physically challenged was Ludwig Van Beethoven, he grew up in a very unhappy home. He was forced to practice the piano by his father, an abusive alcoholic who would punish him mercilessly when he made mistakes. By the time he was twelve, he was earning a living for his family by playing organ and composing. He was eventually known as the greatest pianist of his time.

Nick Vujicic is another powerful personality that makes me want to do more, having born with tetra-amelia syndrome, a rare disorder characterised by the absence of all four limbs. As a child, he struggled mentally and emotionally as well as physically, but eventually came to terms with his disability and, at the age of seventeen, started his own non-profit organisation, Life without Limbs.
Nick Graduated at the age of 21 with a Bachelor of Commerce, with a double major in accountancy and financial planning. Subsequently he became a motivational speaker, travelling internationally. He is indeed an inspiration to me no doubt!

What about you? What are you doing about the dream you have been nursing? Do not give up because of the challenges you are facing now appear insurmountable. Discovering the purpose of your existence is first thing you need to do. Then pursue it with all your might and stop apportioning blame on yourself or anyone. Hear this, the day you stop blaming others is the day you begin to discover who you truly are!