Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Vanessa vs. the Zombies of Bill Heffner Elementary School

Vanessa gave her mother one final spin to show off her meticulously
mismatched outfit before planting a pink flowered boot on the first step of
the bus.

“Have fun, monkey butt,” whispered her mother.

She waved goodbye and gave the driver a big smile as she looked for an
empty seat.
When she was little, she always sat with her brother, but Billy was in Middle
School now so she was making the trip on her own for the first time. He
sure was a pain, but she kind of missed having him there. First day of
school and all. You never know what to expect.

Vanessa found an empty seat a few rows back. She patted her hair flip and
slid across to the window. She turned and looked around at the other
passengers. The bus was about half full. The last two rows were filled with
4th and 5th-grade boys, noisy as usual. The first two rows were filled with
the shy kids and the little kids, not making a peep. In the middle, nothing
but zombies.

“OMG that is sooo cool,” cooed one of them as she examined the “I Y
Hannah” bag carried by her seatmate.

Vanessa rolled her eyes.
“Everyone knows you’re just jealous.” one of them said.
At that, Vanessa laughed out loud.

“Check this out.” declared another. “It’s a special one of a kind Hannah
Montana watch. My mom got it online for my birthday.” She waved her arm
in the air to give the others a good look.

Two of the others were showing off their identical one of a kind watches.
“I guess one of a kind means that you have only one of that kind.“ Vanessa
groaned to no one in particular. She looked down at her own oversized
watch with the brightly striped leather band and smiled.

Living in a military community means high turnover in the school
population. Vanessa was relieved when the bus stopped again and she saw
a familiar, friendly face from her class last year. Relieved, that is, until she
spied the Hannah Montana Metallic Denim Scooter with Glitter Belt.

“Oh no. Not you too.”

“I got a wake up call this morning from Hannah Montana,” she chirped as
she approached the seat.

“You need a wake-up call,” said Vanessa as she shoved her monkey
backpack on the empty seat.

At each stop, a few more passengers got on. Some were zombies,
collectively sporting the entire Walmart Hannah Montana clothing
collection. The rest were regular students buzzing with the excitement of
the first day of school. The seats filled up until the one next to Vanessa was
the only one open.

She picked up her backpack, pulled out her iPod and cranked up
“Funkytown” to drown out the incessant zombie chatter. She sat back and
rocked her flowered boots in time with the music.

At the last stop before the school, a tiny first grader got on and bounced
into the empty seat. Vanessa recognized her from the Family Support
activities on the base.

The zombies, smelling fresh meat, hovered near the new arrival, flashing
their Hannah Montana Thunder Velcro Sneakers and their Purple
Pouchettes.

The little one, not knowing any better, was mesmerized by the glitter of it
all.

“Be careful,” whispered Vanessa. “they’ll suck out your brain.”

One of the zombies slipped a Hannah Montana lip gloss ring on the little
girl’s index finger.

“Nooooooooo,” screamed Vanessa as she grabbed the ring and threw it out
of the open bus window. “That’s how they turn you into one of them.”

The zombies hissed at Vanessa’s declaration and slid back into their seats.

As the bus pulled up in front of the school, the zombies packed their
Hannah Montana notebooks, pencils and school planners back into their
Hanna Montana Glam Glitter Backpacks and Canvas Guitar Sling Bags and
started leaving the bus.

One of them leaned into Vanessa as she passed and whispered, “Next
time...next time.”