*REMINDER: You can mute the sound from the ads on the sidebar AND at the bottom of the page. They will stay muted forever. YAY! Now read in blessed silence*

**BREAKING DAWN REVIEW COMPLETE WITH SPOILERS DUH!!! DON’T READ IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN BD AND DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED!**

Forever is only the beginning

Dear Breaking Dawn,

Remember when we said Eclipse was a real movie last July? Well we hadn’t seen you yet. That’s right, just like fine wine and George Clooney, Twilight keeps getting better with age. And with age comes wisdom… here’s what we’ve learned from Breaking Dawn

Things we learned from Breaking Dawn:

If we hold hands in public it’s for two reasons: we are either 2nd hand embarrassed at all the Robsten fans squeeling at any kiss/hand hold/dadward/sex scene or we were genuinely scared or grossed out. Cause that happens in this. BD is NOT for the faint of heart..

Forget Bella, Edward and Jacob the REAL love triangle of Breaking Dawn is Sue, Charlie and Billy. Cause for realzzzz yall something is going on with the parents. Breaking Dawn has something for every age… There’s still hope after 40!.

Becoming a vampire means instant boob job, shiny shiny Ashley Greene type hair and a permanent smoky eye. Oh and not to mention the blood red crazy eyes. You think someone will ask for this on Dr. 90210 next season?.

Twilight movies can be funny for the RIGHT reasons no longer are Bella and Edward going on a drug trip in the Pacific ocean or slow-mo forest running in Anne of Avonlea clothes, there are moments like the wedding toasts which make you LOL because it’s really funny or when BooBoo Stewart and Taylor Lautner have actual funny Big Brother/Little Brother interaction..

His name's BooBoo... yea I know I don't get it either

Speaking of BooBoo Stewart, he had more lines in Breaking Dawn than Kellan has had in all the Twilight movies combined. And his name is BOOBOO. Time to get a new agent Kellan..

The CGI team used to create the wolfpack earned overtime concealing Kristen’s buttcrack because her gorgeous dress was cut so low in the back. Who knew butt cleavage would be the new IT thing in wedding fashions? Thanks Carolina!.

Give Jackson ANY word it doesn’t matter he will throw that faux Texas accent on it and add the Elvis lip curl and make it into a one word stand up comedy routine. We’re still trying to figure out if this is an intentional choice by him or just dumb luck..

Peter sucks at Rock, Paper, Scissors

Someone will ALWAYS get shafted and be wearing some sort of heinous wig on their head. Unfortunately, Peter Facinelli drew the short straw this time and to make matters worse, I’m pretty sure his hair line changed in every scene as if the bleached dead animal on his head was taking it last gasps of air before it gave in to it’s inevitable future: lying on top of Mike Dexter’s head..

Taylor deserves an award for making the imprinting scene less creepy than we thought it would come off and thank you Bill for showing Renesmee as an adult so everyone else would get it and Chris Hansen could stop hiding in the movie theater broom closet and sit down and enjoy the movie like the rest of us..

Can you not read my lips?! LISTEN CAREFULLY!!

Wolves fighting with each other via mind reading is confusing and weird for people not in the know maybe they could have had a fist fight on First Beach or an angry G-chat session instead so I didn’t have to explain what was going on to the super confused couple next to me..

Housekeepers in Brazil are super rude and stare a lot… especially when they think their employer is a blood sucking demon. However, the blood sucking demon offers great benefits and a 401k so they keep their mouths shut and keep bringing the eggs..

Critics may pan you and haters may hate but ya know what? This ain’t for them. They don’t KNOW Bella and Edward like we do, they aren’t invested like we are. These movies are for us… and the boyfriends and unicorns we drag along with us.

The heardboard scene still makes me laugh. HARD.

Babe, let's sleep in tomorrow and go to the 2nd service

You know what makes losing your virginity to a preternaturally strong vampire better? Losing it while a song fit for the contemporary service on a Sunday morning plays in the background! For reals though, best song and best scene. Sleeping at Last gets a big HALE YES from us..

Speaking of Breaking Hymen, REALLY Bella losing your virginity to a 107 year old virgin was the best night of your life? Maybe the best 50 seconds of your life. Or maybe you’ve got your rose colored glasses on and are romanticizing it a bit..

We do have to say though: Stephenie, thank you (from the bottom of our easily 2nd hand embarassed hearts) for stepping in and not letting them make a Robsten Porno out of the honeymoon sex scenes. THANK YOU!!! It was just right, not too much and not too little… it was perfectly executed so consider us fade to sad-isfied!

Really we loved it… and can’t wait to see it again (and again… and probably again with 10 other people) and then we’ll do some more in depth reviews.

As you know, Monday we attended the black carpet premiere of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (say that 5 times fast after spending 4 hours on the carpet, not eating and an open bar at the after party). Since we were asked to represent Letters to Twilight on the Twilight fansite/press section of the carpet we came prepared with a handycam, a couple iPhones, questions and some killer heels.

So since we fancy now, I’ll just let us, via video, take it away with the introduction…
Please forgive us for the WORST camera angle of ALL time. ALL.TIME.

After a microphone snafu which made me beg like 10 friends for microphones we picked up our GOLD mic (which would later turn into a talking point during our interviews) and busted arse to Nokia Live because we thought we were late to check in but as with all events, they were running way behind. So while we stood in the press check in line between some old grizzled Australian cameraman talking to some newswoman with a football helmet for hair about their days at the ’96 Olympics I gave myself a little sidewalk mani

.

After some mob rule style check in we found this little beauty greeting us…
We knew we had arrived..

We then met up with Val from Twilight Poison who we would be teamed up with that night along with Lindsay from Team Twilight and Tracy from Twilightish..

After we sat up the too short tripod, plugged in the spray painted gold microphone I borrowed from a friend and the handycam I stole from my Dad who bought it to capture my new niece (nothing but the best yall!) we decided to run around like we knew what we were doing getting b-roll and trying not to photo/video bomb EVERYONE’s intro videos… minus that blond kid who looked like he was from the Disney Channel. I definitely ran into him while he was asking some fans about being Team Edward or Team Jacob. Team give me a break people!! COME ON!

After we were all set up UC was whisked away to a different section and I picked up that klassy gold mic cause it was time to DO THIS! Let me just give a shout out to Lindsay from Team Twilight because we rocked the questions together for a lot of our interviews. Between us working the questions and record buttons and juggling mics and press alerts and Vale and Tracy on still cameras we were working ALL the angles. That is definitely what she said.

So of course we got about 8 gabillion little interviews with every vampire in the free world from A to Z list cast and we’ll definitely bring you those soon because there’s some CLASSIC moments in those along with some wah wah waaaaah moments. In the spirit of keeping this post from taking us 10 hours to write we’ll bring you the best of the best in this post…

Speaking of the best… THIS GUY!!! Wyck is officially my new obsession… well besides our two other new obsessions whom we shall reveal later but srsly… WYCK GODFREY you guys. Letters to Wyck… Oh wait that exists. Enjoy his little dance.

Speaking of seeing Renesmee here’s little Mackenzie Foy making her first Twilight appearance! How flipping cute is this kid?
And really, the first family mother and daughter in blue?! Stop is guuuuiiize! Next you’re gonna tell me you scheduled a Christmas card photo shoot on the beach in matching white tshirts and blue jeans..

Dude, Bella and Edward don’t need Prof. Kinsey in BD Part 2?! Hold on to your butts ladies cause Fade to Sad could get Fade to HOT DAMN in part 2 if Bill’s not pulling a Rob on us and totally making shiz up. #TeamBill.

And the winner of Best Dressed at the Breaking Dawn Pt 1 Premiere award goes to…TWO WAY TIE between Jacky’s creepy crushed velvet children’s birthday party magician look and Dean’s girlfriend (she likes man jewelry) with the stomach cut out jump suit. All that’s missing from this look is a velvet turban… and regret..

That’s right we asked a good question Melissa!

Then this happened…
Yes, he was this close to me… This will get it’s own letter at LTR and it’s own video because moments of immense hope and moments of great lose deserve to be immortalized forever on a blog. Duh.

We didn’t have too long to cry because things on the red carpet move like Bella driving a motorcycle (Twilight jokes!): at break neck speed, throwing caution to the win, with the hopes of hearing Rob, I mean Edward’s voice and sometimes ending in a big crash and burn. Oh it happened.

But with tragedy comes greatness… enter Stephenie Meyer….

Then THIS happened…
Yes, that is for all you LTT readers and commenters. The.Best.

After this came Taylor and Kristen and Rob again but because of time constraints and the film starting we could only get within inches of them, gold mic poised and question hanging in mid air before they were whisked away by handlers. “BOO you whores.” But really after that kind of shout out from Stephenie who needs the trinity……… this time.

There is SOOOOOO much more to come we can’t possibly cover it all in one post so stick with us… same LTT time, same LTT channel…

Moon and UC

PS you guys… the MOVIE… the movie…the.movie. we’ll talk soon.
PPS I’m going to act like my weird valley girl-esque accent can not be heard in all these videos. Please also do the same

So were you watching the live feeds at home? Were you there at the premiere? Are you in serious love with Wyck?

We couldn’t have done it without our partners in crime on the carpet: Twilight Poison, Team Twilight and Twilightish. Go visit them, follow them on Twitter and like them on Facebook to see their take on the premiere!

So last week when we broke down the new stills from Breaking Dawn Pt 1 (yea, that’s a really long name) we got to thinking seriously about some stuff and really there’s no one else who can answer this better than you can… So to refresh your memory here is the extended conversation that led to our questions…

Moon: DUDE can you imagine living in that house??? this brings up a LOT of questions!!UC: NO… SO many questions
is it time for another round of “Dear Stephenie: we have a couple questions”Moon: i mean they have vampiric hearing… so did they soundproof each room? or are they that old they just don’t care. like when your grandpa farts and could care less cause he’s 90

Sure, call us prudes, but do you really want your FAMILY hearing every little noise you make in the throes of passion? Or even working out? “What’s that I hear Jasper?” “Oh, it’s just Rosalie on the treadmill…” or IS IT? So did they soundproof the rooms, are they are on opposite sides of the house? Why don’t they all have their own little cottages like Edward and Bella get?

Shhh, no one will ever hear this

Can you imagine the real estate listing if they ever decided to sell that place? “This beautiful 5 bedroom 4 bath comes complete with it’s own cottage on the acreage, modern architecture, brand new gourmet kitchen (perfect for cooking Italiano), 10 car garage and oddly enough each room is completely soundproofed! It’s the darndest thing!”

This also begs the question WHY in the world did Bella want to be human for this? I mean besides the obvious “being human” and whatever wouldn’t she be HELLA scared of what he could do? And then if that’s the case she should definitely want to be a vampire for that… cause um ya know!

Kinda makes me want to be a vampire… so tell us, in your mind did you even go here Stephenie, or are we just the creeps with too much time on our hands?

We want to know!
Themoonisdown

PS bed-breaking sex her first time… is that really safe? For her… ya know.

So tell us, what do YOU guys think? Would you be embarrassed or who cares? What burning questions do you have for SMeyer?

There are some new stills from Breaking Dawn out, so you KNOW we were all over those like a Twifan on an Edward pillow. So here we go….

You're so frugal Alice! You got both our shoes at the BOGO sale at Payless!

The one with THE ShoesMoon: so it looks like most of these are like wedding planning type picsUC: i don’t care WHAT designer they are.. they’re hideous
and so are Alice’sMoon: clearly alice has already been at work because now bella’s wearing skin tight jeans and a pleather jacket from forever 21 UC: right.. Good job Alice.. we’re getting her thereMoon: the shoes look vintage or just a bit wornUC: just an odd heel. (bellas)Moon: like alice took esme’s vintage original early 1900s wedding shoes and added some rhinestone appliqués from michaels to the topMoon: bellas shoes are like the classier version of when people make their own wedding flip flops, only alice probably used swarovski on those shoes.UC: I think Bella is saying “I get what you’re saying, Al.. the rhinestones are nice and all, but I really don’t understand why I can’t wear my smelly ol’ Chucks… No one will be able to SEE under my dress anyway.. and anything bad smelling on me just smells good to Edward anyway- so it doesn’st matter that they smell like I’ve warm them while damp since 10th grade”Moon: do you think bella has to lie down to zip those jeans up? cause daaaamn ginaUC: THose are jeans? I thought that was body paint Moon: same diff… twilight brand jeans/jeggings/body paint coming to a hot topic near you. SYNERGY!Moon: look at alice’s hair line in the back, so is that a weird shadow or did the wig not fit right and they had to photoshop her REAL hair out???UC: hahahah you’re right.. WORST shadow.. or photoshopped hair. I just.. don’t get Alice’s outfit… BLACK tights? alice would for sure be wearing tights with some sort of design on them and not that soccer mom “top” that covers birthing hipsMoon: i think its more the witchy-librarian shoes she wearing for me… sale at the Port Angeles Kohls yall!.

Belllaaa!! I just met a girl named BELLLAA!!

The with the musical!Moon: do you think bella took edward to the “bad” part of town (graffiti!) to threaten him with his life if he shoved cake in her face?? cause i would/will SO do that. shes like if theres any cake near my face you will be the 108 yr old vampire virginUC: Yes. I also think they could have possibly gone to a dinner theater where they were performing West Side Story & their lucky numbers were pulled to come on stage & dance with the performers.

Does this mean we have to suck the blood of the Jets?

Moon: DUDE so weird how theres a big twilight/west side story connectionUC: what there is?Moon: how many times have we mentioned it? and its been in that Rob photoshootUC: hahaha you’re right Moon: bella is going her best “in america” and edward is 100% antoneUC: So true!Moon: even wearing the same outfit!!!
<—— Look!! —–UC: hahahahahMoon: make that belt bella’s wearing red and BOOM.
Follow the jump cause we keep going and it’s Friday and you want a laugh! Duh.Continue…

So it’s become a bit of a tradition (1, 2) for us to delve into the Twilight soundtrack after they’re announced because well, we love music… and I work in it. What isn’t to like about tearing apart the track listing and artists and see what we can learn about the film from it… aka make wild guesses and assumptions.

At first glance I’m intrigued this is definitely NOT the same vibe as New Moon and Eclipse with it’s “indie” (vom, I hate that word) esque sensibilities and thoughtful inclusions… this is almost more in the vein of the first Twi soundtrack minus the mid 90s vibe of Collective Soul etc. *shudder* I think the thing we need to remember going into this is that music in film is meant to enhance a mood or feeling in a scene and to help tell the story without being a total distraction (and come in under budget).

So we’re back at it again with the Chop Shop crew at the helm with Bill Condon so let’s see what they’ve brought us…

1. The Joy Formidable – Endtapes
This is one I was excited to see because I’ve been listening to their album The Big Roar for the last year. Though they’re not my end all be all, I’m glad they were included because they’re the type of artist I would expect on a Twilight Sountrack. I’m assuming this will be some type of upbeat scene with driving or running or maybe when Bella gets out of the car at the gas station at the beginning of BD. Ya know, if we’re being literal.

Listen:.

2. Angus & Julia Stone – Love Will Take You
Lovely little brother and sister duo on Nettwerk another lovely little label. Their music has been on a bunch of CW shows and Greys Anatomy so this isn’t a big surprise of a pick… but they’re kinda snoozeville to me. They seem like one of those bands that was put together for the sole purpose of inclusion on soundtracks and tv shows: innocuous, girl with a baby voice, sounds nice in the background, easy to clear, that sorta thing. I’m sure they’re nice folks and all but Zzzzzzzzzz. I see this in some sort of chill scene maybe the morning after! Heh heh!
Listen:.

3. Bruno Mars – It Will Rain
Ok, so I don’t hate it like UC hates it… she says she can’t even listen to it all the way through. It’s not awful… I wouldn’t kick it out of bed but I’m not ready to spoon with it either.

Some thoughts to settle the crowd down a little: All other lead singles (Twi excluded) haven’t even been featured IN the movie, only over the credits. SO if you hate it THAT much you can just run out before the credits roll. It’s probably a move to get more radio play for the soundtrack and in turn more moola. It’s not like Death Cab and Muse were being played 40 times during Ryan Seacrest’s morning show, so who better to choose as the single than the dude who’s basically PRINTING cash based off his publishing on his songwriting and chart topping songs this last year.

If it’s included in an actual scene, this feels like first dance or dance with Jacob material to me. Vulture is calling it Twilight’s version of “Kiss From a Rose,” I’m also feeling Robin Hood’s “Everything I do, I do it for you” or The Three Muskateers “All for Love.” All of these were massive radio hits which goes back to my theory on why this is the single: CASH. Der. Too bad they couldn’t get Bryan Adams, Sting and Rod Stewart to reunite one more time to create the BD song. I know my mom would have been pumped.