We made a scary discovery the other day, after turning to the Internet for information about the care and feeding of our new puppy.

Seems there are so many dog accessories out there that it is now possible to turn pooch into your own fuzzy, cuddly and sometimes stinky Barbie doll.

We happened onto this subculture while searching for a stylish practical dog carrier. Google directed us to the Pampered Puppy, where we noticed that the site had an entire category for barrettes & jewelry. Other sites separate barrettes into a unique category so that shoppers won't get confused if they actually need a dog necklace.

Duncan is seven weeks old and when we put him on the scale yesterday, he weighed all of 2.4 pounds. He sleeps a lot, but unfortunately, only when he's draped all over us. He hasn't eaten a power cord yet, but he has figured out that leaves and paper towels aren't especially tasty.

Meanwhile, we'll resist the urge to write exclusively about all the adorable things he does. We promise to return to our regularly scheduled programming whenever we stop doting on him very soon.

In a coupla days, we'll be getting a new puppy and our normally quiet editorial offices will be turned upside down.

He's a mutt schnoodle, or a cross between a poodle and a schnauzer. Somehow, we were lucky enough to find him without having to spend a fortune or custom-order him from one of those puppy millsonline dog breeders.

All we know so far is that he's funny-looking, seems to be a reserved and serious little fellow and is so damn cute, it makes us swoon. We're also pretty sure he'll poop a lot.

He isn't the pup in the photo, but looks a lot like this. If you can think of a good name, let us know!

Sometime back, a friend told us what Valentine's Day means to him:One chilly Feburary morning, he woke up to find that his fiancée had bought him one of those cheesy white bears from Walgreens. It held a red heart saying something like, "I LUV U!"

At that moment, he realized she no longer loved him at all.

His logic: Her gift was so cliché, so pro forma, so totally devoid of any real sentiment or irony, and so very, very wrong for the two of them that he immediately understood that it was, in fact, a hostile gesture. They broke up soon after that.

With his cautionary tale in mind, we skipped the Hallmark cards, boxes of chocolate, cheesy white bears and dozen roses. Instead, we present you with our favorite Jim Dine painting, because we care enough to Google the very best.

If the fashionista in your life has seemed a little preoccupied lately, it's because this is Fashion Week in NYC.

As models swaggered down the runways in the Fall 2006 Collections, the rest of us got a preview of what we'll be wearing the coming years.

Marc Jacobs -- fashion's current high priest -- came out with clothes that are best described as Dumpster Chic. His
collection got a stellar review by the NYT, who claimed it captured a "vagabond urban richness." [It's up to the reader to decide whether this remark is sarcastic.]

Aww, c'mon, Marc. Isn't it time you admit that all you've done is swipe this look off the backs of today's starlets.

Lately, media folks have been buzzing about CBS's courtship of Katie Couric, and the likelihood that she'll fill Dan Rather's old seat when her $60 million Today Show contract is up in May.

Yup, it makes us feel a little ill over here too.

So, in case CBS president Les Moonves is reading this, let us make one thing perfectly clear: No one wants a ditz -- especially one who encourages pigeons to crap all over her -- anchoring the CBS Evening News.