WouldJew Believe #27

In honor of Facebook, an Israeli couple names their daughter “like”?!

Korean children learning Gemara? Reading Talmud in their homes “religiously?” You bet! In a country with close to 50 million Buddhists and Christians, studying Jewish Law is now compulsory in the South Korean school system.

"We tried to understand why the Jews are geniuses, and we came to the conclusion that it is because they study Talmud," says Israel's ambassador to South Korea, Young Sam Mah (“Rav Papa”), noting the remarkable intellectual achievements of the Jewish people, along with our family values, which parallel the feelings of South Koreans, who are deeply concerned with education, and family.

Studying Talmud is now compulsory in the South Korean school system!

And so, they’ve turned to us and our holy books for inspiration. In fact, virtually all homes in South Korea now contain a Korean-translated Talmud, and their mamas teach it to their children as well, so their progeny will, like ours, also become “geniuses!”

Ah, but we’ll really know the system is working when Korean Mamas start saying, “Oy, darling, did you make sure that kimbap (sushi-like rolls) is Kosher?! You’ll never be a Nobel Laureate if you eat chazzerai, mamala!”

AND WHILE WE’RE ON THE SUBJECT ......

Have you heard about aspiring Congressman Dan Adler? He’s a (really) dark horse in California's 36th District where about 15% of the voting pop is Korean. He’s become an internet star with his "Stick Together" ad which went viral. The content? Adler, a Jew married to a Korean, is being told by a heavily-accented Korean-American woman: “I’m Korean, I have issues!” and "We minorities should stick together." Funny? Weird? A tragedy? Is his net following translating to the voting booth? Uh ... not yet. In the primary on May 17, he captured a whopping 285 votes, so the question remains, will the “Korean-Jewish” connection ad campaign get his campaign to the July 12 general election, or leave Adler, VP at Walt Disney Imagineering – “imagining?”

ONLY IN NEW YORK?

One of my fave writers, Ron Kaplan (Kaplan’s Korner on Jews and Sports) reported an email he received from a fan regarding the May 19 Mets game. Once again, defeat, oy vey. In fact, so dejected was Mets play-by-play broadcaster, Howie Rose, that his listeners on WFAN heard him kibbitz: “as my people would say, “mah nishtana halaila hazeh.” Not your usual wrap up say, in Wild Horse, Colorado.

ONLY IN SAN FRANCISCO: THE “UNKINDEST” CUT?

If Lloyd Schofield and “pals” who call themselves “intactivists” have their way, circumcision on boys under 18 will be a crime in San Francisco! Shofield, citing circumcision as a cruel, unnecessary practice, spear-headed this campaign late last year. The ADL and other Jewish groups issued a joint statement expressing “great concern” about the proposed measure: "The organized Jewish community is deeply troubled by this initiative, which would interfere with the rights of parents to make religious decisions for their own families.”

But, as of now, Schofield and his followers have collected 12,000 signatures, way more than the 7,168 needed to put the ban on the ballot in San Francisco this November, making our ritual practice a misdemeanor, punishable by a $1,000 fine and up to a year in jail.

The Forward has published two opposing essays on the issue. [See Aish.com's article here.] One was by film maker Eli Ungar Sargo, who wrote: "By allowing parents to permanently alter the bodies of their children, the state is failing to protect its most vulnerable citizens from bodily harm." The other, by Dr. Melvin Konner states: "This is a serious tradition, one for which Jews have fought and sacrificed throughout our long history. It is not harmful, and it may have medical benefits. The proposed ban should and will be opposed by all right-thinking people of any religious faith and by decent people without faith who recognize the rights of parents to decide, within broad limits, what is best for their own children."

Even in the unlikely event voters pass the ban, opponents agree it would never hold up in court.

Of course, a Jewish judge wouldn’t hoit.

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE ........ A “ROSE” BY ANY OTHER NAME

Haaretz reports that an Israeli couple in naming their new daughter decided against the current hot Israeli names for girls, such as Maya and Tamar. Instead, they turned to Facebook for their inspiration, and named her ... “Like.” Yes, you heart right. Said proud papa, Lior Adler: “If once people gave Biblical names and that was the icon, then today this is one of the most famous icons in the world," joking, that the name could be seen as a modern version of the traditional Jewish name Ahuva, which means "beloved."

Oy vey! It could’ve been worse! At least they didn’t name the poor child a diminutive of Twitter!

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About the Author

Quirky, no-nonsense, funny, Marnie – writer, editor, author, lecturer, clinician, and administrator -- is a straight-shooter, who has a distinctive voice and takes on the world in her columns, features, and books. Her advice column was syndicated through Tribune Media Services, and it currently appears in Singular magazine as Singular Solutions. Marnie has written over 20 books/calendars, including the series “A Little Joy, A Little Oy." Her books include Yiddishe Mamas: The Truth About the Jewish Mother and A Little Joy, A Little Oy (pub. AndrewsMcMeel). She is also an award-winning “calendar queen” having written over 20. She has been nominated for both an Emmy and Writers Guild award.Thefullwiki.org has listed Marnie Macauley on their list of top Jewish_American writers, dead or living. (She’s still deciding which.) She was also chosen as a Distinguished Woman in Las Vegas in March of 2014.

Visitor Comments: 7

When Shawn Green hit his first homer as a Met, Howie Called it "Its going going going.. Zei Gezunt!"

(5)
quiteashtrudel,
June 3, 2011 1:30 AM

very classy writing

(4)
marnie,
June 1, 2011 9:56 PM

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE! on Circumcision

It was just announced that a group in Santa Monica calling themselves MGM (male genital mutilation) has ALSO gathered enough signatures to put the anti-circumcision measure on their November ballot in Santa Monica. The spearhead is Matthew Hess who told the LA Times that California law prohibits female genital mutilation and boys should get the same protection.
California Jews (and others in opposition), get out your pens!

(3)
Monica,
June 1, 2011 4:10 PM

San Francisco ban

"a Jewish judge wouldn’t hoit." Do not wish for what you may regret, he may be one of the Eli Ungar's ilk.

(2)
Scott Stewart,
June 1, 2011 2:38 AM

It's better than some other strange modern names!

How is the name spelled? ?"לע'ק"
If the name becomes popular among Jews, I won't be surprised if my congregation will have a member named, perhaps, "Like Skywalkerberg"!

Marnie, the author,
June 3, 2011 9:22 PM

hysterical, Scott!

And so true. I once knew two families who did .... odd naming. The first: Her name was Minnie Chinchinovsky. She shortened it to Minnie Chinchin. (True) Imagine the ethnic groups emailing her!
The second family's surname was "Lear." They named their girls, "Lava," "Chava," and "Chanda."
I wrote a piece on here re: names which you may want to look at. What's "cute" (OK, weird) at age three is NOT cute or healthy when you're 20.
I wonder what happened to all those children who, during the Big Soap "Dynasty" days were named "Crystal," "Cricket,: et. al. when they got to "the home." Oy.
Thanks for writing,
Shalom, and love,
Marnie

(1)
erica van beek,
May 31, 2011 1:37 PM

A girl named 'Like' ?

In the Netherlands the word 'like', written as lijk...means no more than dead body.... If ever I should give my child such a name... ;-)

I'm told that it's a mitzvah to become intoxicated on Purim. This puzzles me, because to my understanding, it is not considered a good thing to become intoxicated, period.

One of the characteristics of the at-risk youth is their use of drugs, including alcohol. In my experience, getting drunk doesn't reveal secrets. It makes people act stupid and irresponsible, doing things they would never do if they were sober. Also, I know a lot about the horrible health effects of abusing alcohol, because I work at a research center that focuses on addiction and substance abuse.

Also, I am an alcoholic, which means that if I drink, very bad things happen. I have not had a drink in 22 years, and I have no intention of starting now. Surely there must be instances where a person is excused from the obligation to drink. I don't see how Judaism could ever promote the idea of getting drunk. It just doesn't seem right.

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Putting aside for a moment all the spiritual and philosophical reasons for getting drunk on Purim, this remains an issue of common sense. Of course, teenagers should be warned of the dangers of acute alcohol ingestion. Of course, nobody should drink and drive. Of course, nobody should become so drunk to the point of negligence in performing mitzvot. And of course, a recovering alcoholic should not partake of alcohol on Purim.

Indeed, the Code of Jewish Law explicitly says that if one suspects the drinking may affect him negatively, then he should NOT drink.

Getting drunk on Purim is actually one of the most difficult mitzvot to do correctly. A person should only drink if it will lead to positive spiritual results - e.g. under the loosening affect of the alcohol, greater awareness will surface of the love for God and Torah found deep in the heart. (Perhaps if we were on a higher spiritual level, we wouldn't need to get drunk!)

Yet the Talmud still speaks of an obligation on Purim of "not knowing the difference between Blessed is Mordechai and Cursed is Haman." How then should a person who doesn't drink get the point of “not knowing”? Simple - just go to sleep! (Rama - OC 695:2)

All this applies to individuals. But the question remains - does drinking on Purim adversely affect the collective social health of the Jewish community?

The aversion to alcoholism is engrained into Jewish consciousness from a number of Biblical and Talmudic sources. There are the rebuking words of prophets - Isaiah 28:1, Hosea 3:1 with Rashi, and Amos 6:6, and the Zohar says that "The wicked stray after wine" (Midrash Ne'alam Parshat Vayera).

It is well known that the rate of alcoholism among Jews has historically been very low. Numerous medical, psychological and sociological studies have confirmed this. The connection between Judaism and sobriety is so evident, that the following conversation is reported by Lawrence Kelemen in "Permission to Receive":

When Dr. Mark Keller, editor of the Quarterly Journal of Studies on Alcohol, commented that "practically all Jews do drink, and yet all the world knows that Jews hardly ever become alcoholics," his colleague, Dr. Howard Haggard, director of Yale's Laboratory of Applied Physiology, jokingly proposed converting alcoholics to the Jewish religion in order to immerse them in a culture with healthy attitudes toward drinking!

Perhaps we could suggest that it is precisely because of the use of alcohol in traditional ceremonies (Kiddush, Bris, Purim, etc.), that Jews experience such low rates of alcoholism. This ceremonial usage may actually act like an inoculation - i.e. injecting a safe amount that keeps the disease away.

Of course, as we said earlier, all this needs to be monitored with good common sense. Yet in my personal experience - having been in the company of Torah scholars who were totally drunk on Purim - they acted with extreme gentleness and joy. Amid the Jewish songs and beautiful words of Torah, every year the event is, for me, very special.

Adar 12 marks the dedication of Herod's renovations on the second Holy Temple in Jerusalem in 11 BCE. Herod was king of Judea in the first century BCE who constructed grand projects like the fortresses at Masada and Herodium, the city of Caesarea, and fortifications around the old city of Jerusalem. The most ambitious of Herod's projects was the re-building of the Temple, which was in disrepair after standing over 300 years. Herod's renovations included a huge man-made platform that remains today the largest man-made platform in the world. It took 10,000 men 10 years just to build the retaining walls around the Temple Mount; the Western Wall that we know today is part of that retaining wall. The Temple itself was a phenomenal site, covered in gold and marble. As the Talmud says, "He who has not seen Herod's building, has never in his life seen a truly grand building."

Some people gauge the value of themselves by what they own. But in reality, the entire concept of ownership of possessions is based on an illusion. When you obtain a material object, it does not become part of you. Ownership is merely your right to use specific objects whenever you wish.

How unfortunate is the person who has an ambition to cleave to something impossible to cleave to! Such a person will not obtain what he desires and will experience suffering.

Fortunate is the person whose ambition it is to acquire personal growth that is independent of external factors. Such a person will lead a happy and rewarding life.

With exercising patience you could have saved yourself 400 zuzim (Berachos 20a).

This Talmudic proverb arose from a case where someone was fined 400 zuzim because he acted in undue haste and insulted some one.

I was once pulling into a parking lot. Since I was a bit late for an important appointment, I was terribly annoyed that the lead car in the procession was creeping at a snail's pace. The driver immediately in front of me was showing his impatience by sounding his horn. In my aggravation, I wanted to join him, but I saw no real purpose in adding to the cacophony.

When the lead driver finally pulled into a parking space, I saw a wheelchair symbol on his rear license plate. He was handicapped and was obviously in need of the nearest parking space. I felt bad that I had harbored such hostile feelings about him, but was gratified that I had not sounded my horn, because then I would really have felt guilty for my lack of consideration.

This incident has helped me to delay my reactions to other frustrating situations until I have more time to evaluate all the circumstances. My motives do not stem from lofty principles, but from my desire to avoid having to feel guilt and remorse for having been foolish or inconsiderate.

Today I shall...

try to withhold impulsive reaction, bearing in mind that a hasty act performed without full knowledge of all the circumstances may cause me much distress.

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