Worms Armageddon (PC) review

"Summon an air strike to blast hemmed in opponents into oblivion. Place a mine near a mass of fighters and watch as the resulting explosion sends worms flying in multiple directions. Toss a sheep at a semi-distant enemy and survey the damage as it detonates with the force of a stick of dynamite. Smile as any survivors curse your name, vowing vengeance, shaking their tiny fists in rage."

What happens when you put a bazooka into the hands of an earthworm? An unusual question, perhaps, but Worms Armageddon is an unusual game. Quirky and challenging, it sets more than just rockets under your control. It gives you an entire arsenal with which to annihilate your enemy.

The result? Wanton destruction.

Summon an air strike to blast hemmed in opponents into oblivion. Place a mine near a mass of fighters and watch as the resulting explosion sends worms flying in multiple directions. Toss a sheep at a semi-distant enemy and survey the damage as it detonates with the force of a stick of dynamite. Smile as any survivors curse your name, vowing vengeance, shaking their tiny fists in rage.

In order to pull off such amazing feats of devastation, you’ll need the proper training. Suitably skilled and equipped with a strategic mind, you can literally wipe out a force twice your size. Which is good because you’ll need those capabilities for the more difficult rounds.

The death match pits your team of eight against CPU controlled teams. You’ll often be outwormed, but usually never by anything outrageous. As you progress through the ranks, the computer becomes smarter and more accurate, your numbers become fewer, and your mistakes become deadly. No longer can you afford to misjudge distance and fuse time when lobbing grenades. No longer can you sacrifice a teammate to a stick of dynamite in order to decimate a cluster of enemies. No; winning will take a lot more than careless mishaps and seemingly noble suicides.

You’ll have to use your environment to its full potential. Water kills your opponents instantly, regardless of health. Candles explode with deadly effect, spewing flames several feet along the ground. Stray mines litter the area; only luck will determine which are duds and which are live. Success strongly depends on whether you take advantage of these opportunities. Just hope your adversaries don’t utilize them first.

But while your skill and strategic ability are greatly important, a great deal of luck is also needed. Placement of your team, which side attacks first, and the accuracy and actions of your opponents are largely luck based. Sometimes this random variable can literally make or break a game. And it’s this variable that led to one of my most epic victories in Worms history.

Several turns into an extremely well-ranked death match I found myself losing miserably. I hadn’t lost any members of my four-worm team, but all of them were severely injured. My enemy was brutally accurate, and I had made far too many clumsy errors, wasted too many powerful weapons. However, at the end of my opponent’s turn, a utility crate landed within crawling distance of one of my teammates. I picked it up and discovered it to be a crate shower. A plethora of weapon crates landed nearby, unusual because crate showers are generally quite scattered. Collecting several of them, I found, among other things, one I had never seen before. This unknown device, dubbed the Scales of Justice, added up all the health in the game and distributed it evenly amongst every warring member. It effectively weakened my enemies, many of whom still had full health, while strengthening me. And it allowed me to win a match I had considered all but lost.

Since then, however, I have been unable to progress any further. The AI is just that good. And lucky. But should you somehow achieve the highest death match rank, congratulate yourself. It certainly isn’t an easy task.

Worms challenges in other ways besides endless rounds of total war. Missions test your tactical ability in a completely different manner. Rather than handing you excess armament, your resources are often quite limited. Further, eliminating every adversary on screen is rarely your sole objective. Instead you often have to retrieve a certain weapon or destroy a specific target. Sometimes you’re racing against the clock. Take too long on a mission, and you’ll end up facing earthquakes or even nuclear winter.

But in order to unlock these missions, you’ll have to run through training where you can improve bazooka, shotgun and other skills. It’s a bit mundane and tedious but worth it in the end, especially if your newfound prowess leads to better success. And considering that more medals yield more missions, it’s in your best interest to perform the tasks well.

Accomplish all of this, and you’ll be a champion, a hero among worm kind. You’ll have overcome seemingly insurmountable odds, surpassed all competition. And you can rest easy knowing that no worm will ever contest you again.

The creepy music pervasive throughout every room, hallway and tunnel keeps you on-edge, expecting something - anything - to ambush you at any moment. Whether it’s the flock of mutant crows that crash through the windows of the second storey, or the rabid dog that bursts through the mirror in the interrogation room, you...

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