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The 26th Birthday Gauntlet

With very few exceptions, I don’t waste time on bad movies. That’s not to say a stinker never crosses my desk — far from it. For the most part, however, I don’t go into a movie with the expectation and/or knowledge that it will be bad. If there’s absolutely zero chance that a movie could possibly be good, I don’t dignify it with my time, money, and coverage. That’s been my policy for a long time now.

More to the point, I could never really understand the concept of enjoying bad cinema. I know there are cinephiles out there who absolutely love the most wretched filmmaking, and I wouldn’t deny them their entertainment, but I don’t get the appeal. So, in the spirit of trying something new for my upcoming birthday, I’ve decided to give it a try.

I’ve assembled a list of the seven most infamous bad movies out there. The ones known to pop culture at large as total laughingstocks. The movies that are used as punchlines, even by people who know nothing about cinema history. The failures that are beloved by many precisely because they’re so reviled by others. The train wrecks that continue to inspire tributes and loving parodies across various forms of media, made by those who love this particular kind of awful.

These are the most notorious (not-so-) guilty pleasures of bad movie lovers everywhere. The absolute best of the absolute worst.

As with all of my birthday projects, I’ll be covering one a day until July 18th. I hope you’ll join me for the ride, folks. It’s gonna get crazy.

(NOTE: To let you all know in advance, The Room will not be a part of this lineup. It totally would be, if I hadn’t already written a massive two–part blog entry on the subject. Even so, no list of the most enjoyably bad movies in existence would be complete without giving The Room an honorable mention at least.)

I hold a B.S. in Bioinformatics, the only one from Pacific University's Class of '09.

I was the stage-hand-in-chief of my high school drama department and I'm a bass drummer for the Last Regiment of Syncopated Drummers. I dabble in video games and I'm still pretty good at DDR. My primary hobby is going online for upcoming movie news. I am a movie buff, a movie nerd, whatever you want to call it.

Comic books are another hobby, but I'm not talking about Superman or Spider-Man or those books that number in the triple-digits. I'm talking about Watchmen, Preacher, Sandman, etc. Self-contained, dramatic, intellectual stories that couldn't be accomplished in any other medium.

I'm a proud son of Oregon, born and raised here. I've been just about everywhere in North and Central America and I love it right here.