Friday Five – Worst of E3 2013

Welcome to the Friday Five! Each week we help you get to know our writers with the help of a top 5 list! This weeks category: Worst of E3!

It’s not every year that we get an amazing show like we did at E3 2013. There were tons of games, and new hardware. Best of all: Sony and Microsoft had it out on stage for our enjoyment! Sony came out on top, but Microsoft isn’t finished. They’ve reversed their policies, and are trying to win back the gamers hearts. Before that, they were just a big pile of disappointment. Sure they envisioned the future, but they failed to sell us on that vision. Instead they let us down. But they aren’t the only ones. There were plenty of things that weren’t that great from E3. Check out our list of the worst to come out of E3 2013.

Chris

Xbox One – Sure Microsoft came out and fixed a lot of the flaws they originally announced, but the E3 show was still pretty boring.

Ryse – It was a pretty game, but I just generally had no interest in it, and there were a lot of quick time stuff for fighting enemies.

Battlefield – Sure it looks nice, and has the crazy destruction physics engine going on, but it’s still just generic first person shooter that a bunch of little douchey kids are going to play online.

TitanFall – This is suppose to be huge, but again I’m just not even remotely interested in it.

Sports– I like NHL, and I wouldn’t mind trying MLB but frankly I just don’t care about NBA, Madden, or UFC which are the three sports games they seem to want to promote the most out of. They all have amazing game engines and look good, but for me they just aren’t fun.

Eric

I got pretty long winded here… So, lets just get into it.

Tablets – These seem to be all the rage this year, and I don’t like it. I recall Microsoft, EA, Ubisoft, and Sony using tablets on stage during their press conferences. Each one showed some cool new features “only available” on the next gen consoles. Some even claimed that this sort of game play was only possible on “X” console. What they all fail to understand is that I’m already shelling out $400+ for a new console, and they all want me to spend and extra $200-500 on a tablet just to get the complete experience out of their games! You know what I have to say to that? THESE EXPERIENCES ARE AVAILABLE ON THE WIIU AT NO ADDITIONAL COST TO THE CONSUMER! GET OVER YOURSELVES AND OPEN YOUR FICKING EYES ASSHOLES!

Project Spark – I don’t know what this is, at all. All I know is that it’s on Xbox One (Strike One), you need a tablet to get the full experience(Strike Two), and the Devs claim that this game is only possible on the Xbox One due to the “unique” Smart Glass features. You know, those features built into the Wii U. Three strikes, you’re out!

Ambiguous Trailers – You know the ones. Those trailers that companies use to get their audience all excited for something huge, only to let everyone down by giving us no information about the announcement whatsoever?! Quantum Break, and Halo 5 are the two that come to mind here. Each ran about 1:30 and gave us absolutely nothing to look forward to besides some pretty images and Master Chief in the desert. You want to excite me? You want me to be interested in your game? Give me a trailer with some interesting story elements and/or gameplay!

Lack of First Party games from Sony – Sony won E3. No arguments here. Everything on display at their conference was placed there to one up Microsoft. And they did it. The only thing missing, was the usual onslaught of first party titles. No Ratchet and Clank(in fact Insomniac was at the MS conference!), no God of War, nothing new from Naughty Dog, and still no word on The Last Guardian! We did get more Killzone, Infamous, Knack, and a few ambiguous trailers (Order 1886), however, we did not get a single exclusive title that sold the console to me.

Nintendo – I loved their Nintendo Direct immensely. I got to see a whole bunch of awesome games coming within the next year for WiiU. However, I didn’t hear anything about a new Star Fox, Metroid, or Console Zelda. . . As awesome as their presentation was, it left me wanting more.

One-Quest was founded many millennia ago in a galaxy know as "n00b," by a foundation of Nerds.
n00b was a small galaxy ruled by an evil empire, known as the "Hipstars."
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