~ “I just kind of conjured them up out of my subconscious and put them in order of ascending peculiarity.” Edward Gorey

The Zodiac Zoo

While I was in NY this year, I was given some great ideas for a few dolls. While it wouldn’t work as a traditional set per se, it would be fantastic for stand-alone dolls, so here they are, little kids dressed up as a zodiac sign.

Yes, I know, there are 13 of them. Before you accuse me of not being able to count, because accidents involving miscounting has happened to me, I just want to point out that Geminis are twins, ergo, two dolls were painted for that sign.

Capricorn

Highly intelligent and practical, but tends to get a bit gloomy at times. I dated a Capricorn once and boy, the gloom emitted from him was inexplicable—especially when his blood sugar was running low. I learned to keep a couple of Fig Newtons in my purse whenever we went out.

Aquarius

Honest, intelligent, artistic and highly motivated. It’s true. My friend, an Aquarius, was artistic and was so honest to a point that she could always be counted on to point out all of your shortcomings—whether you want to hear it or not—sometimes in front of a crowd of people.

Pisces

Honest, unselfish, trustworthy and often have quiet dispositions and are passionately devoted to a cause. It’s true because my friend Jum, a Pisces through and through, was so devoted to Mexican wrestling that he used to bring the masks to work and have me re-enact a fight in the little mail room we hung out in.

Aries

Creative, adaptive, and insightful, strong-willed, spontaneous, and a real party animal. Perhaps it’s my misfortune not to know any Aries while I was in college because he/she could’ve taken my bacchanalian tendencies to a whole other level.

Taurus

Stubborn, practical and efficient. All the Tauruses I know, and boy, do I know a lot of ’em, are exceptionally stubborn. But it’s fine, because they’re the only friends of mine who have been around for decades.

Gemini

Supportive, affectionate, imaginative, and moody. But hey, who isn’t prone to moodiness now and again? The only Geminis I’ve known are some of the nicest people in the world!

Cancer

Traditionalists, homebodies, truthful and sympathetic. Sometimes I think I should’ve been born a cancer. There’s nothing I love more than to lounge around in my big flannel pants during my alone time and meditate about what is and what it isn’t.

Leo

Natural born leaders, generous, brave, headstrong and willful. Oh, boy, don’t I know it! The hubs is a Leo and he tends to get a bit bossy when we’re paddling in our double kayak. “Slow down! Speed up! Now drink your water, that’s a girl!” No wonder they call double kayaks divorce kayaks!

Virgo

Keen minded, inquisitive, naturally intuitive and have remarkable memories. It’s true, because I, being a Virgo, still hold a grudge against my brother, who, on my 2nd birthday, convinced me to burn my specialty candles on my cake instead of using his.

Libra

Understanding, caring, quiet and shy but ironically make great debaters. My mother’s all of that. She always has a great speech prepared, like why I can’t jump off the roof with my homemade wings or that I shouldn’t prepare a Chlorex Cocktail for my brother.

Scorpio

Everything I know about Scorpio is true. If you decide to run a successful company, you should let a Scorpio run it. They’re cool, confident, and secretive.

Sagittarius

Loyal, focused, intense. Yup. They certainly are. My best friend from high school is all of that—especially when he’s attempting to wash his hands or lock his door before leaving his apartment. What? That’s OCD? This was the best doll to paint not because I had to construct a horse’s bum but I got to put a mohawk and a tattoo on him too!