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I'm a lot more confident that I used to be. I think going to University was a big help. About two years ago I just started putting myself in situations where I knew it would build my confidence, even if I was nervous as **** at the time (meeting new people, going to job interviews, doing public speaking, managing a team). I guess I identified what it was that made me anxious and tried my hardest to overcome them. I also attended public speaking training courses, and counselling. I went to the doctors over my anxiety because I was getting absolutely ridiculous (I would wake up nervous) and apparently I had generalised anxiety disorder. I had a bit of CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) and that helped somewhat.

Then I guess you need to stop caring about what other people think, which I don't think is actually possible. I agree with you though, I think it depends on your life, how you were brought up and what has happened to you. Nothing like an incident that makes you question your own mortality to make you reevaluate what you should actually be worrying about in life.

the future is bleak, uncertain, beautiful
tomorrow they might come and arrest us all
only if you listen closely can you hear the machines
beneath the side walk whispering
the machines beneath the side walk are
always whispering
strive to listen close
please, try to be free
don't be afraid
the end of the world will never come

If you feel that way, you should tell the people around you. Tell your wife that you don't feel confident and that more of her support would help you in a multitude of ways. And then do the same for her.

If you feel that way, you should tell the people around you. Tell your wife that you don't feel confident and that more of her support would help you in a multitude of ways. And then do the same for her.

i don't blame anyone else for any problems that i have. that's the easy way out, and it's destructive.

obviously the perfect healthy solution is to exist lin the belief that you deserve anything bad that happens to you (not you specifically) because you suck, and be in a state of perpetual anger directed inward. don't tell anyone around you, because they've already got enough problems, and shouldn't have to feel obligated to help you.

edit: that last bit had nothing to do with anyone else itt, don't get mad

I have some pretty major confidence/self-esteem issues. I drank excessively every day, where 90% of my wages were spent on alcohol for near enough 2 years so that I could feel more confident, but that only lead to health issues for me (Shocking news of the day: Alcohol is bad for you, guys)

I'm pretty much at a point where I can't see any compliment aimed at me as legitimate, which just makes me doubt myself even more, and I just blame myself for everything.

Sure, I act confident online, but it can be very different what you put across in text, than what you actually feel.