What to wear: Dress entirely in bright, traffic-cone orange. Head to toe. No exceptions. An orange jumpsuit is preferable.

What to say: Talk loudly in an authoritative tone. Shoot for 150 decibels; use a megaphone if necessary. Bellow declarative statements: "I am Captain Cursor!" "This beer is good. Drink, drink everyone!" "This is the future of Web design."

How to act: Make large, exaggerated movements. Stomp around, like a giant killer robot, rather than walk. Wave arms wildly when running. Make your presence known to everyone at every moment of the day.