“How do you get it all done?” I’ve been asked this question a few times. “How do you maintain your website? Teach your kids school? Cook meals? Do laundry? Take photos? Work cattle? Write a cookbook? Find time to take a bath?” First and foremost, these questions imply that I actually do get it all done, which couldn’t be farther from the truth. On any given day, I let about fourteen things slide (if I’m lucky). Fortunately, I’m a lifelong underachiever and am able to maintain a sense of peace about me despite my daily failures. But make no mistake: I do not get it all done. I have 57 loose ends swarming around my head as I write this…and they’re whispering acrid nothings into my ear.

Back to my point. In conjunction with the above questions, I’m often asked, “Do you have live-in help?”

I’d like to answer that now, in all honesty and truthfulness.

The truth is, I do have live-in help.

Here he is.

He’s Marlboro Man. And I couldn’t do squat without him.

I also couldn’t squat without him. He’s also my personal trainer. But I don’t want to talk about that right now. It’s a buzz-kill.

My live-in help is pretty cute. But I won’t talk about that right now either.

As a mom of four punks, I sometimes forget how unusual it is not just to have a husband who works close to home all day, but who takes the kids with him to work. He needs their help.

But here’s the thing: even when they aren’t much help at all—say, in the case of my two young boys—he still takes them to work with him. First of all, he knows I could use a little relief at home, whether I’m teaching the girls Latin or editing some photos or cooking a bunch of food.

But mostly, he just likes having his kids around.

But here’s the other thing: He doesn’t just take them with him to work. If he has to go to the feed store, he’ll take ‘em along. If he has to run by the abstract office, he’ll throw the kids in the pickup. And if it’s a slow day on the ranch, he’ll take them to the city to see some superhero flick.

(He’d say that wasn’t much of a sacrifice on his part. He has a thing about Marvel Comics.)

And right now, for instance, he’s taking two of the kids to the city to pick up some birthday presents for our daughter. I think I might give myself a pedicure.

So there you have it: the truth—once and for all. First, I don’t get it all done; far from it.

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589 Comments

201

Shari On Friday, August 29 at 1:28 pm

aaahhh…I love you Ree. This is what the website is all about to me. You love your husband, he loves you, You work together as a team to raise your wonderful punks. You remind me everyday that my life is great, and just the way it is supposed to be….and you remind me to laugh and enjoy the chaos because it’ll always be there. You remind me to be happy and enjoy EVERYTHING in life. Thank you!

MariaV On Friday, August 29 at 1:36 pm

Yes, he is. And we thank you for sharing him with us.

212

Rhonda in Oklahoma On Friday, August 29 at 1:37 pm

Ah-h-h-h … what a relief to hear you tell it like it is, Ree! And I don’t have near the load you do, yet I fully understand about all the “loose threads” running around in your head. I find that there’s always something “yammering” at me to be done. I find homemaking and homeschooling to be a real juggling act between chores, kids, school, shopping, other errands, etc., etc. The disaster kitchen constantly screams at me. The laundry basket is hardly ever empty. Everyone’s always hungry. (And so on!) But at least we can say, “There’s never a dull moment!” A restful, relaxing moment occasionally, but definitely we are not bored. LOL

That’s a wonderful thing, too, for you to bring up about MM being such a good help to you. That certainly is a blessing! Thanks for sharing all this with us. Love the photo of MM and his horse at the gate … that is awesome!

213

Kathy On Friday, August 29 at 1:38 pm

I know exactly what you mean. I am a good mom, but my husband is literally the BEST dad. He always took the kids with him too, (my sister’s kids too, when they are around). They still “check with what Dad’s doing” before making plans with their friends, and they are 19 and 25!!! lol He’s amazing, and it really is so attractive in a man.

Thank you so much for this post. What a wonderful tribute to your awesome husband. In a society where it seems to be cool to rip on men and make fun of them (just watch half the tv shows and commercials), it’s nice to see you give your good man some props. You are an amazing mom/wife/designer/web guru/teacher/etc. but it’s nice to see that you do have some help in the form of an amazing partner. AND sorry so sappy today! My heart is hurting. AND! Awesome pics, love them. Even with my pelvis hurting from my riding lessons this morning. Walking trot…OUCH!!!!!

215

Darlyne On Friday, August 29 at 1:41 pm

Handsome man on a gorgeous horse….Love it!

You are so lucky to have such a great man in your life. And your kids are lucky too. Great memories are in the making every day.

oh yea..one more thing. Does MM ever give you grief for taking blow-by-blow pictures of him mounting/dismounting horses???

228

Susan On Friday, August 29 at 1:49 pm

That’s the best kind of help, IMO! My hubs was almost that involved with our kids as well. He did everything with them..not FOR them..WITH them. He is THE best Dad (a corporate executive with limited time) a city kid could possible have had. Totally family involved. How lucky am I!

229

Rachel from NJ On Friday, August 29 at 1:50 pm

This post makes me miss mine so much more.

230

Joelle On Friday, August 29 at 1:50 pm

You are one lucky lady!

231

Elizabeth H On Friday, August 29 at 1:51 pm

Hugs & high-fives to you both! I know how much of a help it is to have a husband who works at home (sometimes.) It’s really great! (Not to make anyone else out there who doesn’t, feel like their nose is getting rubbed in it…)

JayLene On Friday, August 29 at 1:52 pm

I love how much you LOVE your hubby. It’s so evident that you adore each other. That he is your best friend. And that along w/ all that love and affection is a whole heapin’ tablespoon of respect, understanding, humor and acceptance! Good on you, Ree!

Very nice. The whole thing: him being so helpful and you appreciating it.

Also, here is a question for you: I gathered from things that you have written that MM helped out around the ranch when he was little, so I am wondering if he homeschooled too?

I am really missling my older kids during this busy time of trying to finish up with the garden and put food up. I have my younger ones at home (I homeschool too), but I could really use my older kids help right about now. I can certainly see why in “the olden days” farm kids only schooled during the winter months! I had a neighbor tell my oldest son that my kids needed to “be in school!” This was on the day that I was at the doctor’s office with my oldest daughter getting x-rays and a cast put on her broken leg. Humph! I sure wish I lived in the sticks w/o nosy neighbors!

236

sweepea On Friday, August 29 at 1:53 pm

“thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s husband!”

that said (smile,) i’m so glad you reminded all the overworked ladies out there that no matter what our lives look like to others, we all still struggle to get it done–

I so love your blog. Great reading, fantastic photos! I’ve always been a coastal girl but you’ve made me fall in love the west and the praries! And, I’m baking THE DUMP CAKE right now for my hubby and our punks!

I’m sure you already know it, but you are so lucky to have a man that is truly a man. He is amazing and the two of you together are the most wonderful couple and parents. You’re children have all the love in the world between the two of you. You really are a special person Ree.

245

Bobbie in Alaska! On Friday, August 29 at 2:03 pm

I couldn’t agree more. Lucky girl.

246

Leanbean On Friday, August 29 at 2:03 pm

He sure is dreamy!

247

Dianne On Friday, August 29 at 2:04 pm

My prayer is that my children find a spouse as loving and helpful as their dad.

248

rere On Friday, August 29 at 2:04 pm

you have a beautiful relationship, you two. what a great model you both are!

249

Kathy On Friday, August 29 at 2:04 pm

I have a Knight in Shining Armor for a husband. He has always bathed the children, taken the children places, locked those carseats in the Suburban (I never wanted to do that), hung almost every piece of the children’s artwork on his office wall (he’s a doctor), spent time with the children, shown them affection, kissed them goodnight, answered questions, treated their momma like a queen, and taken one day per week off to be with us all. We have six sweet children-he wants more-and I can do all I do because of what he does.

We home school too, and have a business on the side.

It’s refreshing to read about someone who enjoys their busy life. Thanks. Oh, and keep those home school material posts coming.

250

Shay On Friday, August 29 at 2:05 pm

Those are by far the best jeans I’ve seen MM work in!! For your next installment of Q&A, I may need to know what brand and style those are so I can have a certain someone I enjoy seeing in jeans strut around

I just love this blog…I somehow lost track of it. A wrong feed perhaps? Now I get back and your blog has become so popular there’s hundreds of comments on it and its all stylin and stuff. Wow! You’ve come a long way baby. I’m impressed!

I’m so glad to find you again and you’re right. *grins* He is something else to look at!

Vicki Miller On Friday, August 29 at 2:09 pm

Ok I loved that!! You have very good live in help and it helps that he is so darn handsome!! I mean he looks better than any help with a wart on their nose. Enjoy your help. One day when you let me I will come and help you get it all done in a day and then you can sleep in the next!!!!!

Brandy On Friday, August 29 at 2:10 pm

You and MM are both lucky. My husband always loved having our son with him, and while he couldn’t take him to “work” they spent a lot of time together and are still very close today.

I love the pictures and your site. Thank you for allowing us another peek into your life.

257

Edsmummy On Friday, August 29 at 2:10 pm

A true partnership- as it should be

258

Heather On Friday, August 29 at 2:11 pm

Ree, if he is really all you say he is then you are so lucky, my hubby does help sometimes but last night had a fit because he forgot my hair appt and had to deal with the two kids by himself for two hours!

259

Martha Sue On Friday, August 29 at 2:12 pm

What a guy… I had to laugh out loud when I read, he throws them in the truck… so cute…. very cute…

Oh Good Lord…….these photos…I’m drooling, jealous, drooling some more and now more jealous than I was a few moments before……..I certainly would not be able to get ANYTHING done with that kind of view around me!

262

Daisy On Friday, August 29 at 2:17 pm

Those pictures are really easy on the eyes. What a great horse……………………heehee. You are a blessed woman to have that kind of help around the place. I might add you are also blessed to live in such beautifulsurroundings. I am an ocean girl myself, but I could definitly do the dude ranch thing for awhile !

pip On Friday, August 29 at 2:19 pm

The best to you both. It is wonderful to be married to one’s soulmate. My Daddy, Mamma and my V shaped muscle man always treated me so special. Even though I’ve lost the first two, my V shaped man continues to do so. You have a keen way of writing and drawing the attention and feelings to your words. What a gift from God. The main thing right now is your husband is instilling so much worth, self esteem and value to your girls. Girls need good relationships with their Daddy’s. A great image for your boys. It’s wonderful you have given them both a great Mamma and Daddy. As my Daddy always said, “Children do not ask to be born”. Thanks again for a wonderful blog. One day, I’ll chronicle mine for my children when I finish their scrap books.

I’m glad you are keeping it real for us all. I hear ya, I never get everything done with 4 boys and a hard working hubby that isn’t home till after dinner most days. But, I have SO many interests and it keeps me loving my life: homeschooling all 4 boys, cooking, decorating, my topiary business (www.customtopiaries.com), my goal to have a studio in a local Art Center, blogging on http://www.thetopiarylady.blogspot.com, my boys, oh and laundry! Can’t forget that, and soccer…it;s always an endless list…but that’s motherhood.

It’s better to embrace than to despair!!

But, Ree, I’m not so sure you should be posting all those hot pictures of MM climbing on a horse! You are going to have a lot of ladies drooling over your husband, ya better keep him on your ranch!

JoAnna On Friday, August 29 at 2:24 pm

Jaime Johnson On Friday, August 29 at 2:26 pm

HE IS HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

275

Heidi On Friday, August 29 at 2:26 pm

Ree,
That made me sit back and just realize that my hubby is a great Dad and help awesome I just needed to hear it from someone else. I never give him enough credit but I would never get ANYTHING done without his help with the punks. Now I have to go find him and give him a big kiss even though he smells like manure.
Thanks Heidi

Jan On Friday, August 29 at 2:35 pm

I’m in love with my live in help too:) It is so good hear someone talk so positively about their “help”

284

Theresa in Alberta On Friday, August 29 at 2:42 pm

WOW! And may I say he is a very find specimen of a man, husband and father!!!! Tell his parents “well done” kay and thank God also!!!

285

Carolyn On Friday, August 29 at 2:44 pm

You are teaching your girls Latin? Oh, I love you even more now.

When they get old enough (high school age), you should get them involved with their local JCL– Junior Classical League. In a lot of states, the conventions are unbelievable. You should go to http://www.njcl.org.

Can you tell I’m a Classics major? What sort of Latin are you using– Cicero, Ovid, Virgil..?

Meggles On Friday, August 29 at 2:50 pm

ooooh. how much did you have to pay for that live in help? i’d sure go for some of that round here…

295

Cheryl in Nebraska On Friday, August 29 at 2:53 pm

Awww what a nice tribute to your loving husband. You’re very fortunate–but then you know that!

296

Cindy On Friday, August 29 at 2:54 pm

Must be nice! Not that my DH isn’t a fine guy, he is, just not as fine as your’s. *wink* BTW, underachiever you are NOT! You obviously haven’t met moi.

297

Laura-belle On Friday, August 29 at 2:56 pm

Thanks for brightening my day! Love the pictures and how much credit you give to MM. Love to hear how the two of you complement each other so well. Like others have posted, it’s so refreshing to hear instead of all the guy/husband bashing that’s so prevalent in our culture today. My husband works really hard to help me whenever he can, too, and I love him for it. He just gave me the gift of a housecleaner twice a month. I’ve poo-poo’d it for a long time but finally gave in. Oh my, what luxury! I love it! Since reading your site the last few months and hearing your praises of MM, I have been encouraged to be more deliberate in praising my own husband, both to him and around others. He sure deserves it — he’s an amazing and wonderful man, even while imperfect like me. Hats off to words of encouragement!