Ki SeitzeiBy Rabbi Yisroel Ciner

This week we read the parsha of Ki Seitzei which begins with going out to
war. For me personally, this Shabbos is more 'coming in' than going out. I
just returned home after being away for the past three weeks at a sleepaway
camp that I run. I was able to write Parshas Eikev and Re'eh in advance
before camp but I apologize for not getting to Parshas Shoftim.

The parsha is replete with mitzvos and it was hard to decide what to
discuss. However, there were a few pesukim {verses}which sort of jumped out
at me after some of the experiences that I had this summer in camp.

"Motza s'fasecha tishmore {That which comes from your mouth you shall
guard}[23:24]." The pasukim are actually discussing when one takes an oath
to bring a voluntary offering to the Bais HaMikdash {Temple}. The Torah
warns that the bringing of this offering must not be overly delayed. If you
won't take this oath, there won't be any sin. You didn't have to do it. But
if you did, make sure to fulfill it properly. "Motza s'fasecha tishmore
va'a'sisa {That which comes from your mouth you shall guard and fulfill}."

The words, however, hit me in a different way. "Motza s'fasecha tishmore
{That which comes from your mouth you shall guard}." The theme of this
summer was the Sanctity of Speech. An incident occurred which drove home to
me just how careful we must be with the words which come from our mouths.
Very often, especially in a camp type of environment, there is a lot of
good-natured banter and joking going on. In such an atmosphere it is very
easy to let go a little bit and not weigh so seriously what we say. If a
cute line comes to mind, say it! However, whereas we are the master of our
words before they leave our mouths, once they have been vocalized, they are
no longer under our jurisdiction. Even though we might have meant them one
way, if they seem to indicate otherwise, all of the explaining and apologies
won't undo the damage that they have caused.

The scenario was a two-hour bus ride down to the Dead Sea where there is a
beautiful water park which offers separate swimming in the late afternoon.
We were using a bus company which we had used the past two summers. I had
established a very warm rapport with the owner of the company during our
many phone conversations and he had phoned me the day before the trip to
tell me that he'd be driving one of the busses and was looking forward to
finally meeting me face to face. The reason the owner himself was driving
was because the company had purchased two brand-new, top-of-the-line busses
a few days earlier and he wanted to try them out. He also wanted to bring
his son along to the water park. I knew he'd be watching to see how the
'religious camp' would behave and I was sensitive to this being an
opportunity to make a Kiddush Hashem {bringing honor to Hashem's Name}.

In spite of the fact that he was the very wealthy owner of a large and
successful business, he proved to be a very warm, friendly, down-to-earth
person. Besides the obvious advantage of having a friendly driver for a bus
filled with fifty children, there was also a slight disadvantage. Running
the camp is pretty exhausting and I try to relax and doze off on the bus
rides. Being so excited about the features and handling of his new bus, he
felt the need to share it with somebody. As soon as my eyes were about to
close I'd hear, "Yisroel, do you feel the way the bus...?" I would perk up
and sound interested and then again try to catch a snooze. After this
pattern was repeated a number of times I gave up on trying to sleep and
began to ask him questions about the different features of the bus. He was
only too happy to explain.

We were on a straight-away stuck behind a relatively slow moving car when he
pulled out to pass him. The bus accelerated like a sports car and we were
around him in a matter of seconds. The whole bus gave him a standing ovation
as he proudly told me all about its 420 horsepower. One of the staff members
thought that the concept of horsepower was pretty funny. Does a touch more
than 420 horsepower make it 420 horse and one chicken? Can that then be
upgraded to a turkey or even a goat? That was the harmless concept he had in
mind when he piped up and said, "420 horses and one donkey." We all looked
at him in horror, wondering how could he refer to the driver as a donkey.
Thank the Good Lord, the driver had turned that moment to speak to his son
and didn't hear what had been said. The counselor quickly explained what he
had meant and we understood. However, I couldn't help but thinking that the
driver would never have accepted the explanation as easily as we had. Two
years building of a relationship and a Kiddush Hashem would have been dashed
in a moment of carelessness. Motza s'fasecha tishmore {That which comes from
your mouth you shall guard}!" Even, or perhaps especially, while joking around.

At the same time, this summer showed me what incredible strength can be
displayed by speaking up. We were in the midst of a heated Color War and we
had the entire camp lined up on either side of the basketball court for a
game of 'steal the salami'. It was a very close competition with every
point making a difference and there was a lot of pressure on everyone who
was called to try to make the snatch. One of the last plays involved two ten
year olds, being cheered by the entire camp which included campers twice
their size. One boy made the grab and tried to run back across his line
without being tagged. From my angle I called him safe and as a roar erupted
from his team, a simultaneous groan came from the other team. Suddenly, this
brave young boy took a deep breath, stood tall at 4'11" and said to me, "I
felt him tag me before I crossed the line. The point goes to the other
team."

That was the biggest 4'11" I have ever seen. What control of himself and of
what had to be said.