And oh brother, mmswm, that would make me nuts! I actually had a conversation with my bff not too long ago and she said that in her day girls just didn't really go around with boys unless there was a physical attraction and you just didn't really have so many women having casual platonic male friends. I guess that may be where your mom's coming from, not that it makes it less irritating, I'm sure.

Yeah, maybe. I guess I'm just used to my father's side of the family and their attitudes towards mixed gender friendships, so my mother's attitude is annoying. In my father's family, people do with their lives what they want, and to ehell with gender stereotypes. My grandmother was an airplane mechanic in the US Army Air Corps (when it was still called that) stationed in North Africa in WWII. My father played the flute in the marching band. I'm a mathematician. My son is a ballet dancer. We Don't. Do. Gender typing. Naturally, if you're a female in a male dominated field you're going to know more men than women, and the opposite for men in a female dominated field. You would think that after being married to my father for nearly 50 years, she'd have figured some of this out.

The idea that, because I don't have a job currently, I'm available whenever. My MIL called me yesterday to ask if I could come help pack up her mother's apartment today for a couple hours. Sure, not a problem, I can give up a few hours of my day for that. So I asked when I should come over. "Oh, well, we're not sure. I think Linda's going to be over there tomorrow. We can't get the keys until 8:30, but that's when Linda's just getting up...so probably a little later...maybe around 11? Or maybe noon? I guess Linda can call you when she's heading over there. But maybe you should wait until she's actually there before heading over, in case she gets delayed? " I don't mind a bit of uncertainty, but I can't just give up an entire day of job searching! Not to mention, I live 30-45 mins away, so just driving over there and then hanging out until someone with keys bothers to show up isn't exactly a good idea either.

That would make me nuts as well. And I've been there before. Years ago, when I was still on speaking terms with my parents, the boys would spend Wednesday nights at my parent's house. My middle child has ADHD and at the time he was on meds for it. I'd always make sure they'd have one pill to give him Thursday morning before sending him off to school, but most times I'd get a call from the school.

"Pirateboy2 didn't get his meds, his teacher's sent him to the health office, could you bring him one?" So I'd do that and then call my mother.

"Oh, I guess I forgot, but it's not like you're doing anything else, right?"

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Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

And oh brother, mmswm, that would make me nuts! I actually had a conversation with my bff not too long ago and she said that in her day girls just didn't really go around with boys unless there was a physical attraction and you just didn't really have so many women having casual platonic male friends. I guess that may be where your mom's coming from, not that it makes it less irritating, I'm sure.

Yeah, maybe. I guess I'm just used to my father's side of the family and their attitudes towards mixed gender friendships, so my mother's attitude is annoying. In my father's family, people do with their lives what they want, and to ehell with gender stereotypes. My grandmother was an airplane mechanic in the US Army Air Corps (when it was still called that) stationed in North Africa in WWII. My father played the flute in the marching band. I'm a mathematician. My son is a ballet dancer. We Don't. Do. Gender typing. Naturally, if you're a female in a male dominated field you're going to know more men than women, and the opposite for men in a female dominated field. You would think that after being married to my father for nearly 50 years, she'd have figured some of this out.

Your family = doing it right. I salute you.

Thank you Cherry. The thing is, I was at least in late elementary school before I realized certain of the social "isms" existed. My grandmother was an incredible woman. She wasn't very nice, but she was incredible. Her equality attitude applied to everything, not just gender roles.

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Some people lift weights. I lift measures. It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

When I'm at work, and literally have NOTHING to do. this happens a lot of my retail job, if its not busy, and so on, but my regular one, I can't tell you the last time I had nothing to do.

But due to the govt shutdown, the agency we use for info, docs, etc. is closed. which I would say is about 75% of what I do on a daily basis, and the other 25% is playing "catch up". so the 75% is not there, and I'm all caught up. Thankfully, I will be out the next week and a half on vacation, and my boss is ok with me leaving early today, but...i still have 2 hours to sit and pretend to be doing something!

Contractors who won't call you back. We moved to a rural area and bought a house in April. The house is 40ish years old, and while sound, does need a little attention. We're turning a room off the kitchen into a laundry room - the existing laundry space under the stairs is not big enough for modern appliances. The upstairs bathtub faucet doesn't work, and due to the old plumbing, it's a bit beyond DH's amateur skills. And the garage has a lot of wiring done by the previous owner, and it's creative, to say the least. So there's probably a day's work for a plumber and a day's work for an electrician.

I've called multiple electricians, including some recommended by coworkers and other contractors, and no one will call me back. I've talked to one plumber, who did finally come out to look at the job 6 weeks after I originally called him, but hasn't corresponded with me since. I get that these are one man shops; they don't have an office staff taking messages and coordinating things. I also understand that there's a short construction season here, and they have to get in all the big jobs they possibly can before things essentially shut down for the winter. But can't somebody just please call me and say, 'I won't be able to do anything until November 15th'? I could live with that. But this is making me insane. My dryer sits in the middle of the kitchen. I can't take a bath, my favorite stress reliever, because the downstairs bathroom only has a shower. DH can't proceed with his plans to make a man cave/workshop in the garage, because we don't trust the wiring to not explode when he plugs in his power tools, and we don't want to put in walls until the electric is sorted. I just want to give someone money!

People who don't have enough to do, but pester people that are busy! My DFIL, who was forcibly retired, keeps finding junk that is not ours and brings them to our tiny townhouse. DH is going to talk to him about it Sunday, or I am going to lose it!

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“All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."-J.R.R Tolkien

When things get scheduled during my toddler's naptime. My middle child was away for 4 days doing outdoor school and I got a call this morning letting us know to pick them up at 1:30 at the school. Now the babe usually naps from about noon-2:30, so when I got the message I groaned a bit but sucked it up because well, the school had no way of knowing that.

But it's still annoying to have to interrupt his nap because then he gets fussy but because he's excited to see big brother again, he's too awake and won't go back down.

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Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

I belong to a special, closed Facebook site for people who have adopted from Guatemala. It seems like every other post is for things for people to buy. Granted, they are all cute Guatemalan products but I didn't really join that group to buy things. Stop trying to make money off me folks!

You are not the only one annoyed with no show/no call contractors, Hillia. It's not just rural areas either. I live in the largest city in our state. A couple of years ago I was trying to get bids for a patio in our back yard. Not a small job, but not a huge one either. I probably called 10 landscape contractors. Of those, only about half actually came out to look at the space, measure, etc. The others didn't even return my calls. Of the ones that came out, two vanished into the ether and never called back with a bid. One of the ones that did give me a bid totally ignored what I said that I wanted. (Not a plain rectangle, more organic shape, pavers or stamped & stained concrete.) His bid for a plain concrete rectangle was $$$$. Annoying because I had seen the work that company had done on two other houses in my neighborhood, and the work was beautiful. After seeing his bid for my patio, I imagine that they payed WAAAAAAY too much, though.

We finally went with a man who was willing to work with us and actually listen. We got a beautiful patio with a wall to keep the raspberries from taking over the universe, LED lighting under the lip of the wall and the steps. And it came in less than super expensive company wanted for plain concrete.

I don't mind if they say that they are too busy, the job is too small or too big, etc. Just don't blow me off!

I belong to a special, closed Facebook site for people who have adopted from Guatemala. It seems like every other post is for things for people to buy. Granted, they are all cute Guatemalan products but I didn't really join that group to buy things. Stop trying to make money off me folks!

Unless it is an admin posting the ads I would say one of the member's account has been hijacked. If it is the admins I would send a polite message to them asking _why_ they are spamming the group. If it's not the admins posting the ads I would message the admins and ask them to boot the offender.

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"I feel sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." "It is so low, in fact, that Miss Manners feels sure you would not want to resort to it yourself, even in your own defense. We do not believe in retaliatory rudeness." Judith Martin

I regularly meet with a certain group of friends to watch various games on TV. The cast of characters is:

MeOne of my former college studentsTwo guys who I know because they were friends of above mentioned college studentAn ex-boyfriend

Occasionally others show up.

So yesterday we all get together to watch the Florida/LSU game. The roommate of my ex-boyfriend shows up. Now, while things weren't good when we first broke up, both of us put on our big boy/girl pants and learned to get along because neither one of us wanted to give up the weekend sports gatherings. The roommate decides to try to stir up trouble. The ex and I were exchanging pleasant small talk and the roommate comes up and starts telling me about how he and the ex went out the night before and how some chick was all over the ex and would have gone home with him had he asked. I responded the first few times by just giving him an icy stare. Seriously, why should I care? After 10 minutes of this, evil and snarky came out and I put on the biggest grin I could muster and said "Well good for <ex'sname>. It's about time he put himself back out there!", then turned back to the ex and said "so, back to the game..."

Meetup members who RSVP "yes", then don't show. It doesn't put me out any money but it's annoying to wait in the appointed place, lose the opportunity for a better seat at a movie or live performance, and grumble about why they didn't change their RSVPs.

I've tried organizing outings (dinner or just drinks or even me making food at mine) and every time I get loads of complaints that the date, time, place etc is not convenient.

Fine, I get people are busy. So last time I sent out a message to every one. This is the message I sent.

Hi, I thought it might be nice to arange a ladies night. Even if it's just beer and a burger at local. If you fancy it, want to try and hash out a date and place between us all and arange something.

I was really jealous of the cocktails I saw at bar xyz the other day so I wouldn't mind going there.

Come on ladies lets have some fun.

This message was well received. Once arranged (with me saying little more than, i am happy as long as i can have a nice evening with you lot) it gets enraging.

The people who had said "yay lets do this Friday and of course lets go to XYZ" start moaning and saying "well can't we go here or here because its better" or "Friday is going to be hard time wise" or "i know i said i would come and thats why this day was picked but i am just popping in for one" I am fine with that, but then it's all "ohh but it's your thing. go where you want/do what you want" and it inevitably gets canceled.

so I quit! Shy is officially quitting the socializing thing because i seem to be the only one why tries to organize anything.

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“For too long, we've assumed that there is a single template for human nature, which is why we diagnose most deviations as disorders. But the reality is that there are many different kinds of minds. And that's a very good thing.” - Jonah Lehrer