A small project started by a teen turned into a full blown life mission. A cathartic creative outlet, mixed with body positive discussions, sprinkled with sass. Here is our delicious self-love cake. Want a piece?

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4/29/12

I'm in a little bit of a hurry, so I won't dabble into the reasons why I have been so AWOL lately, and I'll jump right into this late Sunday post :)

Kids. Mother Fudgin' Kids.
We underestimate them time and time again.
'cause honestly, they might have life figured out better than we do.
Example of the day; kid Gabby, circa early 2000s.

I've always been a writer. Ever since I can remember I always carried a cute little diary with me and just wrote non-sensical but ever so fascinating stories. The hundreds of juice-stained and princess-sticker-covered notebooks in my closet speak for themselves; it's what I always wanted to be. That and Barbie, although the Barbie dream screwed me over big time later on during the horrible period that is adolescence :P

Anyways, if you read back every single one of my stories, there is a noticeable pattern, a discernable reccurance in these compelling tales.
In each story, there's a «favorite». A completely perfect character.
She is so easy to spot; she received my favorite names at the time, she looked exactly like what I wanted to look like, everything she said was perfectly calculated so that an unbiased reader would automatically love her, etc.

She was, in other words, my definition of perfect.

But guess what? There is also another pattern in my stories, and one that epitomizes the entire concept of this blog; the character I designed to be utterly flawless, was also utterly BORING.
If she was the main character, my story fell flat. It died after a few pages.
If she was a supporting character, she just faded away, becoming meaningless and invisible, behind the flaws of the interesting characters.

I understood the key to life at age 10; go figure I didn't know how to use it until I turned 16 :P

Life isn't about being exactly right, or being the perfect person we imagine in our silly brains.

Flaws made my characters STAND OUT, and their struggles made them 3 DIMENSIONAL and UNIQUE. No wonder they got their own little novels; hell the really bad ones even got sequels :)

And trust me, my plan as an aspiring author would have backfired. People don't like reading about how utterly flawless ones life is, they like to sympathize, laugh, cry, LIVE through people's moments.
That's what's worth reading. That's how life is worth living.

Wow did I say this would be a short post...LIES XD <3
xoxoxoxoo love ur gorgeous faces
Gabby

4/24/12

Today is tuesday, and I'm hormonal, so deal with my sappiness as best you can, so here's your warning:

If you don't want no sappy, leave while you can:)

Back to today. I feel as thought I don't say this enough, but you guys mean so much to me. Meeting some of you oh these past weeks, getting that video from The Balance Blog (havent seen it? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Kbb2g8ebIU&feature=youtube_gdata_player )
I just feel so blessed.
And when I open every post with hello my beautiful fudgies.
Dont take it lately. for each and one of you it is individual.
You there reading this. I see you. That's who I'm talking to when I say my gorgeous dolls. I am never too busy to read your tweets, your emails, because I'm not just this God that rules of the land of FPP, I'm here on this emotional journey with all of you.
I have my bad days too, and I try to convince myself I'm beautiful just like you are too.

I cry when you cry. I laugh when you laugh.
Realize that the impact you all have had on me is greater than you can imagine.
If I could I would get all your names tattooed on my body.
Ow. Jk, magic marker could work:)

I warned you.
Sappy Tuesday:P
In conclusion I don't throw around words like beautiful randomly.
I actually mean em.
You. Yeah you. I'm not done.
Smile, you are pretty.

4/22/12

Dionne Warwick, 1964, sang this:A room is still a roomEven when there's nothing there but gloom. But a room is not a house And a house is not a home

April 2012, Janelle, 15, wrote to the FPP, and asked me this:

«Hey Gabby! My dad is in the military and we move around a lot.

I have a hard time making new friends, and I often find myself binging when I'm lonely, or bored, or whatever.

What should I do?

PS: You can put this on the blog or whatever if you want :-)»

***SIDENOTE: if you feel like emailing me, always assume that I will answer (not ONE email since the beggining has gone unanswered), and so you do not have to start every email with YOU'RE PROBABLY NOT GONNA READ THIS BUT... because I will. Trust me, dolls mmkay ?<3

Back to you, Janelle.

When I came out of the hospital, I came home to the same bedroom, the same bathroom where I had left all of my disorders and problems.

So I understand that for you, when you are put in a situation of loneliness after another move, you resort back to binging, because that's what you make yourself feel at home.

So what did I do to make sure I wouldn't just recycle my bad habits?

Make a real home.

Binging is really just to fill a void (lack of stable housing can obviously be one).

You find yourself in a house, but it's not a home.

Home is comfort. Home is happiness and safety and little Disney birds singing at your window.

Jk, but seriously.

Collages of pictures of places you've loved, or you want to go to.

Of your goals, your dreams, the people who matter to you.

Pieces of art, books, diaries, never leave them behind.

Candles, perfumes or air freshners whose smell remind you of a better place.

4/20/12

Sometimes, after a seriously long day at school, I dont really want to turn on my computer and answer 10000 emails and think of smart yet sassy things to write about. Trying to save the world? I cant even save my math grades!!!

But then something like this happens, and I remember why I do this.
I love the blog, and I myself have benefited greatly from my own advice,

But I do this mostly, because of my schhmexy fudgies.
And when someone I have never met makes a video like this, I cant help but litterally scream bloody murder and cry.
Because there is NOTHING in the world that makes me happier than this.
I dont care about seratonin. Or X.
THIS IS BLISS.

PS: @BabyGymStalker no i dont mind that you said that at the end of your vid. because you're right. The fight we are fighting is so much bigger than just eating disorders. Like you said, it's the ups and downs. :)

4/19/12

Now who is Crystal Renn, you might ask?
Crystal Renn is a model. A plus size model. The picture you see on the left is here now, at the peak of her very successful career.
On the right? Crystal, 10 years or so ago, as a debuting «normal, regular size» (isnt that funny? REGULAR SIZE?) model.

4/10/12

After all the love I got from the first in-depth explanation of my «3 tips to feel beautiful» article for Drop of Pink, I decided to go ahead and explain the 3rd little trick; the MESSY one :)

For those days when you’re feeling PARTICULARILY low about your appearance, and when nothing seems to work, grab the bull by its horns. Actually, you’re going to grab a lipstick (matte preferably, for it glides off with more ease) and write yourself a positive message on your mirror.

This actually answers a lot of the questions about the promotional video and pictures where you can see girls writing on a big mirror; it's the whole goal of the organization;

When you keep reminding yourself why you are so special, you just can't SEE those imperfections anymore. They are hiden from your flaw-searching eyes, thus, like in the picture above, all you can see is what truly matters.

Wipe the tears from off your face, I KNOW you just teared up a little there :)JK, but in all seriousness, there is a relatively scientific explanation to this.

Like I describe in the rest of the article, having those words at eye level helps your subconscious absorb the message, and practically brainwash you. Sort of like advertising, where they plaster your view with a product, your lipstick declaration of self-love will slowly make it's way, and you'll actually start to believe it.

Having this message on a mirror is crucial, because this is the one place where woman find flaws, and I dont need to explain to you what kind of effect that can have...

It comes out rather well, but keeping it on won't stain your mirror, you should be more worried about it staining your brain :)If you share a mirror and dont want to start world war 3 with your siblings/parents, write this message anywhere (your hand, your agenda), just so you can keep reminding yourself :)

4/9/12

Today is a much-anticipated blogpost. Not only is this a theme that appears in 50% of your fabulous emails to me, but this is probably one of my biggest. pet. peeves. ever. on this planet.
FAKERS

Now they're are a lot of «fakers» in this world, but today we are talking about the people who like to fake eating disorders.
No. I'm not even kidding. Pick up your jaw from off the floor, they are real and in the land of high school, it is an EPIDEMIC.

1. First and foremost: VERY IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER THIS: it's all about the attention.
These people (okay these girls) will be easy to decode, because everything they do or say will revolve around having attention. So keep an eye out, you can already think of those types of people.

2. An eating disorder is a mental illness. People suffering from such usually don't go walking around screaming their disorder from the top of a mountain, but it will get you pity. Fakes LOVE pity.
When one starts to have unhealthy eating habits, he/she will be ashamed of it, and be extremely embarassed and secretive about it. They will isolate themselves, hide those patterns, rather eat alone, etc.
You don't want people asking questions, because it will break the idea that everything is okay in your life. It's not, of course, but for those suffering from an ED, everything revolves around keeping that appearance.

TIP-OFF: Thus, if you have just read the last paragraph, you understand how completely illogical it is for someone who is truly suffering to very openly proclaim «I'm fat. I haven't eaten in 10 days»
or such indiscretions.

3. These girls don't necessarily take the time to research. Too busy fake starving themselves or something. They will portray the very basic «symptoms» of the classics, like not eating.
But the real diagnostic between say a diet and an ED, is actually the little details.
The organization of your food, the bites you take, the speed, the comfort level.
All very subtle and almost subconscious, it really takes one to diagnose one :)

4. What if you're not sure? Do you go and get help? What if she is faking?
Always get help. In any case.
If she is sick, great. Double round of applause for you.
But what if she was just faking?
If someone is seriously so deprived in their normal life that they have to pretend to have a mental disorder in order to feel loved, this person may not have an eating disorder,
but she most certainly has a PROBLEM.
Off you go to get her help too :)

Alright thasss enuff :)
See you later
(and all 13 of you i will get to see at IMATS! WOOHOO)

4/5/12

Hey loves!
Been AWOL for a little bit, just life getting in the way (and numb3rs :P) but I'm back in the game!
***BTW Im gonna be at IMATS NYC next weekend, and have had some meetup suggestions, so if you're gonna be in town, tweet/email me mmkkyay?Love to meet some of you :)

Now back to this post; 5 myths about eating disorders.

1. To have an eating disorder, you have to be underweight, or at least skinny.
WRONG
Advanced stages of eating disorders result in drastic weight loss, but not neccessarily.
Bulimics especially, because when purging, you only lose about 15-20 % of the massive amount of food you just ingested, and most of the 15-20 is water.

Going as far as injuring your body is an eating disorder. Not being skinny.

2. The cause of ED? Magazine covers and models, of course!
FALSE
I wrote an entire post about this subject (see it here:http://fudgeperfection.blogspot.ca/2012/03/media-is-not-problem.html ).
I strongly disagree with this idealogy, and you'll see why in the article.
ED=mental disorder=its not even about what is happening around us or what we saw, but the way we process it.

3. The only people with eating disorders are pre-teen/young adult girls.
So not true.

Yes, there is a higher percentage of teenage girls, but out of all the people with ed right now, about 10% of them are guys! No one bothers talking about, it's quite taboo, but trust me it's there.
Women in their 20s, their 30s, 40s, any age really are affected everyday, but it seems that the only stories told are the ones of young, innocent teen girls.
It's sad really, if no one sheds a light on their situation, no one can help them.

4. Being on a diet=having an eating disorder
NO
Since it's arrival in the media in the 70s, eating disorders are usually associated to rather extreme diets.
But the difference in the matter is simple; being on a diet is usually controlling the food we eat and being more active. All these things are physical changes, lifestyle choices.

When it comes to ED, the change is psychological before anything else. It affects our body, but only as a consequence of whats happening up there. And sometimes, that change is not a choice, but a curse.

5. Last but not least; OMG THAT GIRL DID NOT EAT LUNCH. ANOREXIC. ALERT THE MEDIA.
hahahah this is so ridiculous it makes me laugh.

First of all, our hormones as teen girls affect our bodies in the craziest ways; and yes sometimes we're not hungry. Its that simple.
But more importantly than that (and a new article is coming up about this topic), girls with eating disorders are usually very secretive about it. They will isolate themselves with their unhealthy habits.
I dont know why, but in recent years, it has become cool to pretend you have an eating disorder.
To get attention. or pity, which ever. So dont jump to conclusions and be on the lookout for my next post :)

What are some of the myths you've seen or heard?<3
As always, stay lovely.

4/1/12

Hey loves! Haven't been around a lot recently, have I? Well I'm back (hopefully) for the rest of the week, so don't worry:)

Today I would like to share with you a little thing I would like to start.
I receive lots of emails, and I love it, and a lot of them seem to be asking for advice or help in a situation.
Some of these questions often ultimately describe the same type of situation, so I thought it would be useful to just put them on the blog.
That way, everyone, even those who don't email me but are in a similar situation, can benefit! Sound good?

So keep those emails coming and you might find yourself on the blog
***disclaimer: I will not put your name or location if you don't want me to. It's up to you:)

***disclaimer2: I am not an all-knowing god or a self-proclaimed guru. I'm just a girl that has definitively lived a life of what not to do's and hopefully now can
Share her what to actually do's with other girls. Iss dat simple ;)

So our first question today comes from Annabel, and she is basically asking, like many other girls have, what to do when you think you have an eating disorder; who do I go to? What do I say? How do I know for sure?

Okay. First off: if there is a little doubt in your mind that you may have an eating disorder, I honestly would not go on a crazy google spree. Lemme tell you why: There are so many variations of anorexia and bulimia that Wikipedia doesn't talk about. So don't go thinking that you're fine because your situation isn't exactly like that or you don't have all the symptoms.
PLUS it can give you all kinds of bad ideas and actually make you go crazy by seeing all the things "wrong" with you.
So push. The keyboard. Away.

Secondly: talk to someone. this will be by far the hardest part, and it's your call wether it be a medical professional (my recommendation), a family member, a counselor, teacher, whoever you feel you could tell the most about your condition and who could really guide you to help.

I personally would try to not tell a friend right away: in certain cases it can work out great: she knows what to do. Keeps it a secret and save your life.
But it often doesn't work that way; some people can't hold things like that on their shoulders. Some people just don't know how to react to delicate situations like that. It's unpredictable, really.

Another tip is to write down the things that worry you. It will help you remember, so that being on the spot doesn't affect your memory. Having a little list also helps to be accurate and honest with your statements, so that diagnosis is precise and the help you need will be exactly that: what you need.

Also, Always remember to tell this person what you actually feel or do, not what they want to hear. If the person you are speaking to is not taking you seriously, find someone better. This has happened to me, and it made me question how bad my condition really was.
You deserve health and happiness, and if that person doesn't acknowledge your pain, fudge them. Hasta la vista.

Whatever you do, keep your head above water and remember that even if it may seem super hard to open up, your health is #1 priority, and fight until you have it 100% your way.
Got it?