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Dennis Hof, owner of the Mustang Ranch, won his race for the Nevada legislature even though he was dead. He wasn’t even newly dead. The guy had been dead for a month. Voters had plenty of time to weigh the options. “Unnnnh, I don’t know: dead pimp. How much harm can he do?”

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On Thanksgiving, when asked what he was thankful for, Donald Trump actually said he was thankful for himself. This man is to egotism what Wisconsin is to cheese. What Texas is to bullshit. What Hollywood, Las Vegas and Washington D.C. are to hookers. More?