Comments on: How to Give and Take Criticism like a Manhttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/
Men's Interests and LifestyleSat, 01 Aug 2015 23:57:00 +0000hourly1http://wordpress.org/?v=4.2.3By: Lucas Matias Randazzohttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-1154512
Sat, 11 Jul 2015 11:48:00 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-1154512I suppose one of the most healthy approaches to criticism would be to remember that they’re not criticising WHO YOU ARE as a person, but rather something you did, which in no way reflects who you are as a whole. By shifting the focus of the heat from the SELF to the ACTION, you can somehow detach yourself from the emotional element that conveys the critic to the self, and focus on how to do better what you did.
]]>By: davehttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-616547
Sat, 12 Apr 2014 23:04:05 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-616547Never had a problem giving criticism. I can be abusive or constructive with equal ease. I just can’t take it well. Wether constructive or destructive I take it all badly & quit what ever iam trying soon after. Pathetic I know. That’s just the way I am. I’ll take your advice and see if I can improve my self. Thanks for the article.
]]>By: Kylehttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-578307
Tue, 11 Mar 2014 22:48:34 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-578307I once read on another forum about giving constructive criticism and one technique is the *Sandwich* technique about giving two pieces of praise with the criticism in the middle so they will likely read what you actually have to say.

At least it will force them to think for a moment as just telling them what they did wrong and how to fix it in most communities is still considered rude and flaming.

You can even get banned if you do it on some forums or to some youtube owners who just want emotionally pleasing comments.

All I can offer you is another woman’s perspective on your issue, which is that many men perceive any criticism from a woman (especially one wielding authority over them in some fashion) as her taking on a mother role, which automatically puts him in the role of powerless little boy.
I’m not saying they reason it out that way, but that it’s more of a kneejerk emotional response in a man who isn’t secure in his manhood. Unfortunately, in our current, emasculated, PC-driven society, that’s a lot of men.
Since you can’t fix other people, the only solution is to make sure that you aren’t projecting an attitude that would encourage a man to feel that way, and/or hire women.

Do you think most men are really not capable of taking criticism, especially if it comes from a woman?

I am a business leader and I am getting to the point of only hiring women because men are unable to take any kind of negative feedback from me. I always try to make it clear and do it with a sense that I care for the person and I really deeply do.

My sense of men is that they get very emotional when they are criticized, like there is an unbearable humiliation that lurks below that they just don’t want to feel. Then a screaming match easily ensues which leaves me feeling shaken and vulnerable. It is scary having a man scream back at you just because you suggested that he was operating in crisis mode rather than taking the next step every day.

I have noticed that men due to their physical strength have a way of scaring me with violence. I am not taking about being hit but rather just violent shouting. It makes me shut up and back down out of fear.

Any advice?

Thanks

]]>By: porkchophttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-460165
Wed, 16 Oct 2013 19:13:21 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-460165excellent article, much of which confirm the greatest learning of my first 50 years living: there are just too many ways to communicate badly.
the best instruction I’ve had in giving criticism is from contemplating the results of criticism I’ve received: more often than not I have followed the suggested course in spite of the presentation, not because of it.
understanding this, I try to tread gently when commenting on the foibles of others: not merely speaking as I wish to be spoken to, but rather speaking as the other wishes to be spoken to.
]]>By: TJhttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-437657
Tue, 30 Jul 2013 05:23:21 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-437657When giving criticism, only talk about what you see – don’t try to read people’s minds!

Wrong: “You’re not trying!”
Right: “I see you doing ______________, but it might help you more to do __________________.”

]]>By: Aubreyhttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-434289
Mon, 22 Jul 2013 01:39:52 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-434289This was an excellent article. I particularly like (not really like, but will find useful :-) the part about following up with a criticism after you have made some change or improvement. I can actually use that advice this week at work.
]]>By: Andraehttp://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/11/04/how-to-give-and-take-criticism-like-a-man/comment-page-1/#comment-384980
Fri, 03 May 2013 00:07:14 +0000http://artofmanliness.com/?p=1051#comment-384980You know, this article really speaks to me. I will definitely take this advice and apply to my life from now on.
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