We are collaborating with
A Place in the Sun and will be exhibiting at the
NEC in Birmingham from 30th Sept to 2nd Oct and
advertising in their magazine. If you want us to
feature your home specifically and massively
increase the opportunity of selling it call us NOw!

(You’ll find us just round the corner from the Thursday market at the roundabout)

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

m
Fro Ed...
the

CONtaCt Us:

3

Editor: keidi - 610 976 284
Email: info@thesentinella.com

In life sometimes it’s important to step outside
our comfort zone – to do things we wouldn’t
normally do, go places we wouldn’t normally go,
and generally experience a different reality than
what we are used to.

Taking this advice on board, I’m about to go
camping for the first time! The wilderness experience in the beautiful mountains of Idaho
lasts not just for a couple of days, or even five
days, but for ten days…! And there’s no campsite so I’ll have to make do without the luxury of
toilets and showers.

Follow us on twitter @the_sentinella
or @keidi_keating

There’s white water rafting, rope work, mountain climbing, canoeing and lots of other activities which I’ve never experienced before.
There’s even bears apparently, but I’m trying
not to think about that right now!

Deposito Legal
Ma-1435-2005

In addition to all that I’ve never flown on my own
beyond to and fro from the UK, and an odd
flight from Malaga to other cities within Spain.
Getting from Malaga to Idaho involves three
flights, three overnight stays in hotels (I fancied
a bit of pre-trip luxury) and a good few minicab
or shuttle bus rides.
So you may wonder how I am feeling about this
upcoming trip, which is quite a long way outside
of my current comfort zone. Well I feel naturally
nervous, slightly anxious… but I also feel empowered, excited and as if I’m on the brink of a
new beginning. The thought of waking up
everyday in nature fills my heart with a warm
tingly feeling, as does the idea of getting to
know other likeminded souls in such an open
setting.

Email: sales@thesentinella.com
www.thesentinella.com

No part of this publication, including
pictures may be copied, used or reproduced
without our prior written consent.
The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for
alterations to events listed, claims made by our
advertisers or information provided by our
contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to
Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of
The Sentinel Magazine.
May he rest in peace.
(Born; 1960 Died; 2004)

But above all I’m looking forward to the creativeness that will accompany the trip. I’ll be
able to sit overlooking a babbling stream with
my notepad open, scribbling down whatever

www.thesentinella.com

4

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

From The Ed (cont)

words come. I’ll be living on the edge of inspiration, waiting to see what ideas the universe
throws my way. What’s even better is that I can
record all my experiences and feelings and
emotions around the trip, while living them all
at the same time.
As humans it’s not uncommon to stick to what
we know, usually only living the particular experiences, thoughts, and feelings with which
we are familiar.
But what if we changed all that? What if we
woke up one day with the full intention to do
something completely different to the norm?
My advice to you is to just do it. After all, if you
keep on doing what you’ve always done then
you’ll keep on getting where you’ve always
got…Instead simply look elsewhere, take action, and EXPAND YOUR WORLD!
Ps. I’ll let you all know how the camping trip
went in the October issue!

Extreme parking
A Lithuanian politician has
been filmed using an armoured vehicle to crush a
car parked illegally in a
cycle lane.

Arturas Zuokas, the eccentric mayor of Lithuania's capital, Vilnius, says in the clip: "That's
what will happen if you park your car illegally."
The apparent owner then arrives to see his
wrecked Mercedes being towed away, reports
the BBC.

"In the past few days, expensive cars have
been illegally parked in almost this exact place
- a Rolls-Royce and a Ferrari," Mayor Zuokas
said. "What should the city do about drivers
who think that they are above the law? It
seems that a tank is the best solution."

The stunt was shot over the weekend for a
popular Swedish TV series, 99 Things You
Should Do Before You Die, and has been
posted on YouTube.
sooty strikes back
Paul Daniels was taken to hospital with head injuries after
being hit in the face by a pizza
thrown by Sooty.

The 73-year-old magician was
filming a scene for ITV's The
Sooty Show when he was
struck by the flying pizza, leaving him dazed.

Daniels suffered a black eye and was taken to
hospital for treatment, The Sun reported.

The newspaper claimed the incident happened
after Daniels complained that in a first take of
the scene, the pizza had not been thrown hard
enough.
But as the puppet, operated by co-star Richard
Cadell, hurled the Italian dish a second time,
Daniels was injured.

Chris Davis, Daniels's agent, told the newspaper: "It damaged his eye. We had to go to hospital and cancelled a gig, but he's made a full
recovery."
Daniels, who was appearing on the show as a
special guest alongside his wife and assistant
Debbie McGee, 52, apparently insisted that
producers use the take in which he was injured.

Ever seen those pictures of crystal clear rivers
and deep, inviting pools, surrounded by pristine nature, and wondered where they are?
Well, these scenes are on our very doorstep
and access is easier than you might think. With
the intense summer temperatures of August,
take an adventurous dip into those clear, cool
waters with a canyoning trip to Rio Verde.

Rio Verde, the stunning river that borders
Malaga and Granada provinces is the perfect
playground for those who love exploring na-

ture; and with canyoning you can see the region’s landscape from a whole new perspective.

Canyoning is
an adventure activity
where you
can explore
w a t e r
gorges,
a
wearing
suit,
wet
strong shoes
and a safety helmet. Andalucía has some of
Europe’s most spectacular gorges and
canyons, offering stunning waterfalls, deep
natural pools and breathtaking scenery. The
best way to do this is as part of a group, organised by a professional activity firm. Local
tourist offices will give names of licensed firms
that have access to the pristine waters of the
Rio Verde. For example, Team Xtreme gives
you unrivalled access to the river, and their professional, fully insured guides will teach you
new skills, including exhilarating and highly enjoyable abseils, climbs, jumps and of course
some swimming! You don’t need to be an expert, as there are routes especially designed
for beginners – you just need a strong sense
of adventure and fun!
“Make exploring nature an adventure!” suggests Babak Alimoradian, the energetic and
charismatic owner of Team Xtreme, one of
Spain’s new breed of adventure activity companies.
“We’re so lucky living here in Andalucía; we
have some of the finest scenery and adventure
locations right here.” He continues, “One of our
most popular activities we offer here is canyoning, as it is not too physically demanding and
we can choose routes that match clients’ abilities – and there are lots of opportunities to take
a break and relax.”

So why not take a break from just a normal
hike in the mountains and take advantage of
some real active relaxation with one of Team
Xtreme’s professionally designed canyon
routes? You’ll get provided with all the equipment you need and a certified guide. “You’re
guaranteed to have a great time!” confirms
Babak.
team Xtreme
tel: 952 768 349 Mon - Fri: 09.00 - 19.00
or mobile: 676 022 237
Email: info@teamxtreme.es
web: www.teamxtreme.es

ON

TAJ MAHAL
Traditional Indian Tandoori Restaurant
Torrox Costa

9.95 €
Eat as MUCh as yOU LikE

Y
L
ON

We offer an´all you can eat’ menu
(as many starters, main courses & desserts as you want)
all freshly cooked to order.
You stay seated at your table as everything
is served to you in courses.
Open every day - 12.00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 24.00
Closed tuesday Lunch
Ctra Nacional - 340 (Next to Post Office) torrox Costa

for chemical straightening, advanced colouring, retail cutting
& perming, all obtained in Mayfair, London at the
Goldwell Academy.
“Danni” is a Toni & Guy Style Director and has managed their
salons in Dubai and Amsterdam
Marina & Danni both hold NVQ level 3
Advanced Hairdressing qualification
“Tony” a traditional barber with 50 years experience, who will now
be here ALL DAY EVERY MONDAY - “JUST WALK IN”
Please telephone or pop in for a FREE CONSULTATION

Introducing “Chantel” to our team, bringing a brand new technique that’s
sweeping the UK - Lipo by Laser
By targeting adipocyte cells (fat cells), the process offers an effective and safe
solution to fat reduction without surgery, the pain or the recovery time.

Ham and Eggs - A day's work for a chicken; A
lifetime commitment for a pig.
I didn't fight my way to the top of the
food chain to be a vegetarian.
I don't even butter my bread; I consider
that cooking.

I do not like broccoli. And I haven't
liked it since I was a little kid and my
mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to
eat any more broccoli.
Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.

Once, during prohibition, I was forced to live for
days on nothing but food and water.

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can
afford to buy steaks.

When those waiters ask me if I want some
fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any

aged pepper.

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it
makes me think that the chef
is spending too much time arranging and not enough time
cooking. If I wanted a picture
I'd buy a painting.

Most turkeys taste better the
day after; my mother's tasted
better the day before.

Statistics show that of those
who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.

The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one
fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep
sending it to each other.
McDonalds announced it’s considering a more
humane way of slaughtering its animals. You
know they fatten them up and then kill them.
You know the same thing they do to their customers, isn’t it?

Everyday All day - Fresh Sardine skewers!!!
NEW MENU - Come and try!
Every Sunday - Roast Dinner - 3 courses just 10.95€
(with an English cook, this is the talk of the town)
Every first Saturday of the month Varied dinner menu with live music (excellent atmosphere)

Contacts: Carlos 679 739 681 or Leila 622 105 809

14

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Free Property Legal Review Open Day

De Cotta

De Cotta Law, (De Cotta, McKenna y Santafé
S.L.) with offices in Nerja, Coín, Mijas-Costa
and the Canary Islands is launching a series of
Autumn Open Days.
These Open Days will offer all readers unprecedented, free access to the legal expertise
of the De Cotta Law team. Free, bookable consultations will be available at each office during these special open days, where readers
can discuss their legal queries and request
reviews of their property deeds and wills.
Dates will be available in October and will be
announced shortly; so to register your interest, please contact De Cotta Law on:
nerjaenquiries@decottalaw.net or call the
Nerja office on 952 527 014 or the MijasCosta office on 952 931 781.

In related news, De Cotta Law is opening a
new office in Coín, in purpose built premises
In Sierra Chica, opposite its original local in
the La Trocha shopping centre. The new of-

fice will be open in October, and during September private consultations are available
throughout the region by appointment.
www.decottalaw.com
Jon Sutton - Coin
office, De Cotta
Law

Sandra Wrighton - Nerja
office - De Cotta Law

ANDALUCIA HOME SERVICES
All round no nonsense property services
based near Viñuela.
We offer a reliable service you can trust
with no gimmicks or fancy jargon.

For a quote for any other work please
contact us via phone or e-mail
Enjoy peace of mind knowing that your
home in the sun is in safe hands
Contact us on 00 34 634 408 838 or
e-mail kimsmith691@hotmail.com

“OSTEOPATHY for the whole family”

OstEOPath
Clementine Duplan

Bsc (hons) Ost (Ukqualified)

"Gentle and specific treatment of
the whole body,
also for children and pregnant mums"

Member of the
General Osteopathic
Council
(English register)
and the Spanish
Osteopathic register

One day, a man came home and was greeted
by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. 'Tie
me up,' she purred, 'and you can do anything
you want.' So he tied her up and went golfing.
---------An old man goes into a chemist to buy some
Viagra. 'Can I have 6 tablets, cut in quarters?'
'I can cut them for you' said the chemist 'but a
quarter tablet will not give you a full erection.'
'I am 96' said the old man. 'I don't want an erection. I just want it sticking out far enough so I
don't pee on my slippers.'
---------A couple was going out for the evening.
They'd got ready, all dolled up, but just needed
to put the dog out when the taxi arrives.
However as the couple walked out of the
house, the dog shoots back in the house.
They don't want the dog shut in the house, so
the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband
goes upstairs to chase the dog out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house
will be empty, explains to the taxi driver: 'He's
just going upstairs to say good-night to my
mother.'

A few minutes later, the husband gets into the
cab.
'Sorry I took so long' he says. 'Stupid bitch was
hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with
a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I
had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from
scratching and biting me as I hauled her arse
downstairs and tossed her in the back yard!
She better not s*** in the vegetable garden
again!' The silence in the cab was deafening.
---------Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one
day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The man at the counter asked the older boy,
'Son, how old are you?'
Eight,' the boy replied.
The man continued, 'Do you know what these
are used for?'
The boy replied, 'Not exactly, but they aren't for
me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four.
We saw on TV that if you use these you would
be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he
can't do either one.'

Línea Directa aseguradora is the market leader in the sale of insurance for foreign residents in spain. since 1998 it has offered its customer services in English and german,
which include handling claims, selling policies or road assistance, among many others.
Francisco Valencia, Corporate governance Director, introduces us to a new service: fine
management.

Francisco Valencia: “For Línea Directa, Expatriates
form an essential part of our strategy”

Línea Directa was the first spanish insurer to offer its services in English and german. why
this commitment to Expatriates?
For Línea Directa, Expatriates form an essential part of our strategy. Since we set up Línea Directa, in 1995, we have forged close links to them, due to the fact that our company model was
imported directly from England, and as a result offering services specifically designed for them
was something quite natural. We currently have a portfolio of over 1.85 million policyholders,
64,000 of whom are foreign customers.
One of the latest services offered to Expatriates is fine management. what does it consist
of and what advantages does it have?
Our service offers the foreign customer advice on traffic fines in his or her own language, including notification of the official bulletins, a benefit specifically designed for Expatriates. In Spain,
when the person receiving the fine is not at home, he or she is considered to have been notified
of the fine after it has been published in the Official Bulletin of the province where he or she resides,
thereby reducing or even eliminating any chance of defence for someone who spends many
months of the year abroad.
what does this service cover and what other benefits does it include?
Apart from the benefit that it can be used by any driver over 26 years of age, the cover also includes
a payment of 500 euros to finance a road safety re-education course if the driven licence has been
withdrawn.
Once again Línea Directa shows its commitment to its foreign customers residing in spain,
offering them the best services and cover at the best price. you can find out more about all
the benefits available at www.lineadirecta.com or by calling 902 123 104.

20

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Bad Day?

Things got ya down? Well then, consider
these...

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11am, regardless of their medical
condition. This puzzled the doctors and some
even thought it had something to do with the
supernatural.
No one could solve the mystery as to why the
deaths occurred around 11am Sunday, so a
worldwide team of experts was assembled to
investigate the cause of the incidents The next
Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11am
all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited
outside the ward to see for themselves what
the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some
were holding wooden crosses, prayer books,
and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits Just when the clock struck 11:00, Fernando
Rodriguez, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support
system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.
Still having a bad day?

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after

the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was
$80,000.00 At a special ceremony, two of the
most expensively saved animals were being
released back into the wild amid cheers and
applause from onlookers.. A minute later, in full
view, a killer whale ate them both.
Still think you are having a Bad Day?

A woman came home to find her husband in
the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a
dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running
from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she ran outside and grabbed a handy
plank of wood and smacked him with it, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment,
he had been happily listening to his iPod.
Now something to brighten your day!!

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough
postage on a letter bomb. It came back with
'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it
was the bomb; he opened it and was blown to
bits!!!!

ESOLA

F-Gas 2079 Registered

You wouldn’t choose a non-qualified engineer to install your gas
products in the UK … so why would you here?
All engineers required to handle HFC refrigerants must hold the
new European F-Gas qualification from 4th July 2011

Units fitted from 439€

Esola Systems

Best Prices Guaranteed
Domestic and Commercial Air Conditioning
(Heating and Cooling) Installations

Tel: 616 119 007 / 952 550 323

New tyres fitted
from 35€
(155/80R 13)

Free
Brake
Check

Starter motors
& alternators
repaired

Service
with oil &
filter from

45€
inc. IVA

Air-con
re-charge

41€
inc. IVA

(cheaper
than recon/new)

Pro Neumaticos

22

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Solutions 4 U is not just an estate
agent, but a company specialising
in the legal aspects that surround
property purchase and sale.

Solutions 4 U

Buy with confidence - Unfortunately many property deeds have irregularities and it is our speciality to
eradicate them, whether it’s because
you are selling and don't want complications at
completion, or want to buy with a sense of
complete confidence. When we list a property
for sale, we guarantee to check all the paperwork, identifying issues such as un-registered
property extensions and swimming pools. If
you are a buyer, we will not just tell you it has
a title deed, but find out whether the description
on the deed corresponds with the actual existing property. Solutions 4 U and its associate
lawyer first look at correcting any inconsistencies on behalf of the vendor, and secondly,
give our buyers the assurance that the property they buy is fully up to date, registered on
the title deed, the Land Registry records and
with the Catastro. If you become serious about
one of our homes, then we will have these certificates to show you. We can also advise on
planning issues. Clarifying this beforehand

saves endless difficulties and unnecessary
heartache later on.

have peace of mind - For those who already own a property, we offer a FREE consultation. Bring along a copy of your title
deed and rates (IBI) certificate and we will
carry out the necessary searches to establish whether all your property is registered in
your name, check the m2 of both the property
and the land, and that the boundaries are correct. This takes approximately 10 days, and if
inconsistencies are found, we will explain what
needs to be done and give you a written estimate of the cost. Once the work has been
completed, you’ll be shown where the corrections have been made, so you can be happy in
the knowledge that all your property is fully registered in your name in all three necessary departments.

and we are a real estate agency - Solutions
4 U has a number of highly desirable properties for sale exclusively with us that you won’t
find anywhere else, with prices to suit the most
ardent bargain hunter. We also cover all legal
aspects, satisfying even the most cautious.
See main advert on page 15

Sat.Co

Want to see the latest in TV Technology?

“FREESAT”

Stunning High Definition TV - For FREE?
No Card, No Subscription, No Contract!
Also available:
Spanish Digital TV, FreeSat + HD, Sky Plus HD, other Language Systems
Full range of Digital HD TV Sets, delivered and installed for free.
Installations, Dishes, Alignments, Cards, Multi-Room etc.
Appointments available in all areas 7 days a week
Call us early for same day service!!
For a FREE - No Obligation - Home Demonstration Call: 657 484 853
Or email: tproctor29@yahoo.com
ALL WORK FULLY GUARANTEED

TORROX COS
The Best Climate In

t
Monday Marke

RROX COSTA

Cool Bandanas

are a personal cooling product that will pull the
heat out of your system, cool your body off and
make your body and mind work more
efficiently....and help keep you cool all day.

10.95€ each or 2 for 20€

Come and see these at the following markets;
Trapiche on Tuesdays & Viñuela on Fridays
or call Tony on: 664 689 138 for free delivery

here! There is so much going on at tabla rock
Cafe. LIVE MUSIC: The first and last Friday in
September and every Saturday night. Enjoy a
ta
s
o
C
x
Sunday bbq with semi acoustic live music on
Torro
our fabulous terrace. Aerobics, Pilates and CirSeptember at Caribe, we are starting a bridge
cuit classes every week plus starting in Sepclub, just social bridge using chicago rules, so
tember will be flamenco classes and
if you want to play for fun and the chance of
Zumbalates!! Giant TV screen, quiz night &
winning a free bottle of house wine, email us at
karaoke nights, pool & electronic darts, large
info@caribetorrox.com and put â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;bridge at
Caribeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in the heading and we will send you full
details.
We also have real homemade cakes. As many
of you now know we really do make our own
cakes and we have now added a delicious
Chocolate and Orange cake along with our
Carrot Cake and of course our original Dutch
Apple Crumble pie, so if you would like some
real homemade cake, do drop in and try a
slice.
out it

all ab
- read

yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes are held
every Tuesday night at El Ancla del Cirilo, a
fabulous location right on the beach on Calle
Penoncillo N340 between Torrox Costa and
Nerja. Classes start at 8.30pm and beginners
are always welcome, its easy, its fun and a
great way to meet new people. You don't need
a partner; come by yourself or bring a friend.
Follow us on Facebook "YO JIVE TORROX"
Email info@yojive.com or call on 651 564 046
for more information or just turn up on a Tuesday night.

CardioDance: Learn to salsa, cha cha, swing
and hustle to an aerobic workout. Dance
classes also held in all these, plus rumba, sal
cha and choreographed routines. 606 086300
hughgrant@tiscali.co.uk

TORROX C

russells British store has a great stock of
favourite British products. We have a frozen
foods section and also stock cleaning products, toiletries and even pet food. Each month
we have special offers in store, so call in to see
our September offers. Don't forget we have a
wide range of cards for all occasions.
redhouse signmakers. Suppliers and designers of all types of signs - shops, pavement
boards, estate agency ‘for sale’ boards, vehicle
advertising, windows, banner stands and
more. New telephone number: 675 091 982.
Email redhousesigns@yahoo.co.uk Website:
www.redhousesigns.com

as you may think... we are now taking Xmas
bookings, please call for details.
Join us at Los amigos in September, Karaoke
every Friday night from 9pm, Live Music on a
Saturday night and September’s line up is Saturday 3rd Andy Time, 10th Party Night with
Rockin' Robin and 24th Alan Miles. Chill Out
Jam Session on Sundays from 9pm with Dr
Dave or the Siesta Blues Band. Quiz nights on
Wednesday 7th and 21st and Live Music with
Katie the English Rose on Wednesday 14th.
Line Dancing starts again on Monday evenings
from 7pm.
For reputable buildings and contents insurance, car insurance, private medical insurance, pets insurance, funeral plans and more,
contact Lewis insurance services.
Cool Bandanas are a personal cooling product that will pull the heat out of your system,
cool your body off and make your body and
mind work more efficiently....and help keep you
cool all day. Simply soak your Bandana in cold
water for 25 to 30 minutes. Come and see
these at the following markets; Trapiche on
Tuesdays & Viñuela on Fridays or call 664 689
138. Just 10.95€ each or 2 for 20€

restaurante El Pino Come and enjoy Sunday
Lunch at El Pino with our early bird option
(reservations required) 3 courses 11€, buy one
and get one half price. Friday nights are fish
and chips night, buy two meals and get a free
bottle of wine as well as entertainment with either our popular quiz with Hugo on 2nd, 16th
and 30th September or live music on 9th and
23rd. We still have our 2 for 1 meals Monday to
Thursday for only 6.95€ and it’s not as far away

Lads & Dads Barber shop with 20 yrs experience. Whether you prefer mobile or an appointment, both are catered for – or just pop in.
Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts. If you would like to advertise on our Torrox feature pages from
just 20€ a month which includes text, to
promote your business further then call 664
210 468 or email: sales@thesentinella.com

OX COSTA

C
S

C
S

CLINICA EUROPA
English Dentist:

Medicine

Dr. Michael Mannish B.D.S.
(univ. of London)

General Medicine

DENTAL EMERGENCIES -

Paediatrics

Physiotherapy, Osteopherapy

648 203 157

Harley St. Dentist of 25 years

Take advantage of your free 2nd opinion
before you start your treatment.

Over 18 years experience
Collection Service
Long stays our speciality
We also have CAS dogs & cats
looking for a home
tel: 951 254 134
660 167 902

Email: terrygweston@yahoo.com
we are on the torrox - Competa road,
100m from Pavo real

Clinica Casa Blanca
OSTEOPATHY

Clinic for:

THE BOWEN TECHNIqUE

Massage, Lymphatic drainage, Shiatsu, Reiki, Reflexology,
Ear-Acupunture, Craniosacral Therapy
Do you suffer from back problems, spinal misalignment, pain in neck
or shoulders, joint discomfort, tightness in muscles, internal ailments,
migraines, fibromyalgy or do you just want relaxation from stress?
The Bowen Technique is gentle and works on the whole body for
inflammation, illness and pain. The treatment is safe and appropriate
for everyone, from newborn babies to the frail and elderly.

Artist Michael will be available to draw your Caricature Tuesday and Friday nights
Open from 11.30am to late 6 days a week

Tel: 952 967 734
Closed Thursdays

Find us on Paseo Maritimo, Torrox Costa
At the end of Avda. El Faro, down the steps and we
are on the right just before Flamenco Fusion

Find us on

Sky
Sports

Sands & C

Casa Maria
Jam Night - Mondays

(with hosts “Flip” & “Aqui te Partie”)

ESPN

Happy Hour Mondays - Saturdays - 5.30pm - 7pm
Sundays 12pm - 4pm

(1€ bottle, 2€ pint San Miguel, 1€ glass of wine)
Sunday 11th September - BBQ with live music with “Johnny Hollywood”
4pm - 7pm followed by Karaoke
Saturday 17th September - Live music with “Luxarda”
Sunday 25th September - BBQ with live music
4pm - 7pm followed by Karaoke
Sundays 4th & 18th September Karaoke from 6pm with Bjarne

New rules mean it will be easier and
cheaper to travel abroad with pets.
It will become cheaper and easier to travel
abroad with pets when new rules are introduced at the start of next year.

The UK will harmonise its pet movement rules
with the rest of the European Union from 1st
January 2012, bringing the UK’s Pet Travel
Scheme into line with the most recent science.
The UK will maintain its high level of protection
against animal diseases after the changes,
which have the potential to save pet owners
around £7 million in fees.
Forcing pets to spend six months in quarantine, a practice dating from the 1800s, is no
longer necessary because of vastly improved
rabies vaccines and treatments.

All pets will still need to be vaccinated against
rabies. Pets from the EU and listed non-EU
countries such as the USA and Australia will no
longer need a blood test and will only have to
wait 21 days before they travel. Pets from unlisted non-EU countries such as India, Brazil

and South Africa will be able to enter the UK if
they meet certain strict criteria to ensure they
are protected against rabies, including a blood
test and a three-month wait before they enter
the UK. The changes will ensure the risk of rabies coming to the UK remains extremely low.
It’s estimated that the new rules mean there
would be one case of rabies in a pet in the UK
once every 211 years, with the possibility of a
person dying from rabies obtained from a pet
once in every 21,000 years.

Tick treatment for pet animals returning to the
UK will no longer be required. All pet owners
travelling abroad with their animals should discuss with their vets the use of treatments, including those designed to control ticks as part
of good animal health practice.

The UK, along with Ireland, Sweden and Malta,
has an exemption from the standard EU pet
travel rules. They are all harmonising their
entry rules with the rest of the EU at the same
time as the UK.
For more information visit:
http://www.defra.gov.uk/news/2011/06/30/n
ew-rules-pet-passports/

Maintenance
Repairs
Technical Service Diagnostics
Installations
Consultations
Computerised analysis of water
NOW AVAILABLE!! - Instant test for bacteria
the only one on the Coast - Results in 20 mins
Español - English - Francais - Nederlands
www.aquamarinepools.eu
aquamarinepools@hotmail.com

600 811 355

WANTED
*Cars *Motorhomes
*Plant Machinery
*Bikes

ANY YEAR - ANY REG.

Totally everything considered
We collect scrap vehicles from
campo or urbanisations

CASH BUYERS
*Embargos No Problem

Rick: 653 477 306

rickowenh@yahoo.co.uk

Ref. SH647

Ref. SH623

Nice country house in Almayate bajo,
rustic syle. Just 2.5km from the beach.
Sea views. Plot of 200m2 and house of
70m2. The main house has 1 bedroom
and the guest house has 1 bedroom,
1 bath and 1 toilet, kitchen.
Has nice garden and terraces.

Law of Mechanical repair
After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to
pee.

to the reach.

Law of the theatre
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
the starbucks Law
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something which
will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers
If there are only two people in a locker room,
they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of gravity
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of random Numbers
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a
busy signal and someone always answers.

Law of the alibi
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the very next morning you will have a flat tyre.

Variation Law
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one
you were in will always move faster than the
one you are in now (works every time).

Law of the Bath
When the body is fully immersed in water, the
telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters
The probability of meeting someone you know
increases dramatically when you are with
someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of Physical surfaces
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich
landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the
carpet/rug.

Law of Logical argument
Anything is possible if you don't know what you
are talking about.
Brown's Law of Physical appearance
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Oliver's Law of Public speaking
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

wilson 'wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing strategy
As soon as you find a product that you really
like, they will stop making it.

Doctors' Law
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to
go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll
feel better. Don't make an appointment and
you'll stay sick.

Law of the result
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional

Blues & Rock Band established for over 2 years,
specialising in popular covers of Muddy Waters,
Rolling Stones, Clapton & Elvis etc.
We are a four piece band that play regular gigs from
Castell de Ferro in the East through to Lake Viu単ela
in the West.
If you feel you can fufill this role either in part
or in full
Please call Brian on 679 452 418

44

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Grandma's letter.

For The Love Of Christ!

She is eighty-eight years old and still drives her
own car. She writes:
Dear Grand-daughter,
The other day I went up to our local Christian
book store and saw a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Honk if you Love Jesusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;
bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy
that day because I had just come from a
thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting. So, I bought the sticker
and put it on my bumper. Boy, am I glad I did,
what an uplifting experience that followed.

leave them after all the love we had shared. So
I slowed the car down, leaned out the window
and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign
one last time as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!!
Will write again soon,
Love, Grandma

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how
good he is, and I didn't notice that the light had
changed. It is a good thing someone else loves
Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never
have noticed. I found that lots of people love
Jesus!
While I was sitting there, the guy behind started
honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of
his window and screamed,
'For the love of God!'
'Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!'
What an exuberant cheerleader he was for
Jesus! Everyone started honking!
I just leaned out my window and started waving
and smiling at all those loving people. I even
honked my horn a few times to share in the
love! There must have been a man from
Florida back there because I heard him yelling
something about a sunny beach. I saw another
guy waving in a funny way with only his middle
finger stuck up in the air. I asked my young
teenage grandson in the back seat what that
meant. He said it was probably a Hawaiian
good luck sign or something. Well, I have never
met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the
window and gave him the good luck sign right
back. My grandson burst out laughing.

Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!!
A couple of the people were so caught up in
the joy of the moment that they got out of their
cars and started walking towards me. I bet they
wanted to pray or ask what church I attended,
but this is when I noticed the light had
changed. So, I waved at all my brothers and
sisters grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed that I was the only car that
got through the intersection before the light
changed again and felt kind of sad that I had to

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts
SHE Lives In A Boeing 727

Planely Brilliant!!

What a creative idea! Joanne Ussary bought a
used Boeing 727. She paid $2,000.00 for the
plane. It cost $4,000.00 to move and
$24,000.00 to renovate. (She has a LOT of
wood and specialty windows for $24,000! I
want her carpenter!) But not bad for a
$30,000.00 investment... The stairs open with
a garage door remote and one of the bathrooms is still intact. There is a personal Jacuzzi
in the cockpit. The Boeing home is featured as
part of a collection of creative conversions.

Dry-stone
Gabion Walls
Do it yourself or we supply and erect.
Up to 50% saving against conventionally
built stone walls

Do it yourself kits supplied with full instructions and advice
or we can supply and erect using our own fully qualified staff.
All products delivered direct from the manufacturer in the UK

No planning required
No architects drawings
No long waits for building licences

No sand or cement needed

Suitable for landslips, retaining wall solutions & ornate landscaping
All Gabion baskets are guaranteed for over 50 years against corrosion
Gabions act as natural drainage so no water diversions are necessary

The only mobile service specialising solely
in car air-con systems.
Get your a/c serviced now before next
summer and before it lets you down.
Have your headlights
gone opaque or
yellow?
Before
This is now a fail on
After
the ITV test so get them professionally
refinished.
For both services call Mike now on
951 321446 or 616 264067
www.autocoolspain.com

CAR OLD
BOOT
SALE
& NEW

“BARGAINS GALORE”
1st Sunday of every month

Restaurant El Pantano
9.30am - 1.30pm

(On the A356 towards Colmenar, overlooking the lake)

Call: 619 471 301 / 669 600 419

20€ per hour
Call Barry: 628 236 661

Beat the recession. Develop a second income for your family.
Become a specialist seller of world-class products.
Have you ever wondered how eBay sellers, independent retailers and some of the
world’s largest stores make such large profits on goods people want to buy?
The answer is simple: they buy the best products, from the best suppliers,
from India, China and Asia.
If you would like to be part of this global
trend, now is your time!!
Prestige Imports was established to import
quality goods from all across India, China and Asia for European suppliers to sell at
substantial profits. Due to the efficiency of our purchasing strategy, we have sourced the best
suppliers in these countries. Consequently, we have access to all types of marketable
products, from Harry Potter wands to top-of-the range All Terrain Buggies.
The list is endless and can be tailored to suit your customers’ needs.
Although we are aimed primarily at the retail trade, we have recently helped friends and
colleagues set-up their own eBay sites and watched them grow. Consequently, we spotted a
gap in the market and have decided to offer this service to people like you who wish to
cash-in on the rapid growth in independent retailing. To help you grow your own retail
business, we are offering a gateway direct to the Asian manufacturers. If you are a committed
seller, we will help you along your retailing journey, by helping to cut your costs and
arranging timely and cost-effective shipping of the goods you buy. Using this method, we can
help you grow. Indeed, our motto is simple: “Your success is our success”. If you are starting
from scratch, we have a team of experts that can advise on business strategy and launching
your fully functioning eBay shop and trading website.
If you would like to learn more about starting your own retail business with high
quality, competitively priced products, please contact our managing director,
Nigel on: 654 200 367 or prestigeimports65@msn.com. The time is right, so act today.

Just remember: Your success is our success. Act today!!

also

!
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n
o
o
s
g
n
i
com

52

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Clinica Casa Blanca

Three years ago Bianca, from Clinica
Casa Blanca in Torrox Costa opened her
doors offering an extensive range of
services. Come and celebrate with
Bianca on her 3rd Anniversary on Saturday 17th September from 3pm - 8pm.
Bianca received such a positive response
from her last 2 parties, that she is once again
offering 20% discount on treatments for the
first 20 clients. If you can’t make the party,
just give her a call. Also there will be free
snacks and drinks provided from 3pm - 8pm.
If you are suffering with knee, hip, foot,
shoulder or neck problems or any type of
back pain, then you should visit Clinica Casa
Blanca. Bianca who owns the clinic has successfully been using the original Bowen
technique with many happy clients. She specialises in golfer´s elbow, wrist problems,
asthma, respiratory complaints, menstrual
and hormonal irregularities, depression and
much more.
See page 34 for contact details.

Random Joke

Last night, my friends and I went to a Ladies
Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress the rest of us, so she pulled out a €10
note. When the male dancer came over to
us, my friend licked the €10 note and stuck
it to his bum cheek!
Not to be outdone, another friend pulls out a
€20 note. She called the guy back, licks the
€20 note, and sticks it to his other bum
cheek.
In another attempt to impress the rest of us,
my third friend pulls out a €50 note and calls
the guy over, licks the €50 note. I'm worried
about the way things are going, but fortunately she just stuck it to one of his bum
cheeks again.
My relief was short-lived. Seeing the way
things are going, the guy races over to me.
Now everyone's attention is focused on me
and the guy is egging me on to try to top the
€50. My brain was churning as I reached for
my wallet. What could I do?
Then the woman in me took over! I got out
my ATM card, swiped it down the crack of his
bum, grabbed the eighty euros, and left!!!!

Printer ink cartridges

Original or Compatible for all major printer brands

Free delivery from Nerja to Rincon de la Victoria on all orders over 60€

We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our
SHOWROOM at LAKE VIÑUELA
In order to give clients individual attention please phone for an
appointment before visiting. We are situated at KM29 (on right)
off A356 1km past Camping & Pantano Restaurant.
We are signposted from there.
From bouncy chairs to buggies, stairgates to sterilisers.
Everything you need for when little ones come to visit.
PHONE DAWN ON: 627 931 360
WEBSITE: www.nurseryneeds.com
EMAIL: dawn@nurseryneeds.com

Cockroaches are not the most popular of
insects, but despite the efforts of people to
eradicate them, they are probably the most
resilient on our planet.
1. Scientists have actually performed brain
surgery on cockroaches.

2. German cockroaches can survive for up to
one month without food and two weeks without
water.
3. A cockroach can change directions up to 25
times in a second.

4. If a cockroach breaks a leg it can grow another one.

Cafe - Bar

“Serving a selection of new dishes and
of course, Fresh Fish!
Attractive prices”

Special Offer!
Delicious Lobster
500gr. - only 18€

C/Marquita 3, Paseo Puerta del Mar,
Almuñecar
Tel: 958 630 245 / 629 882 696
You can find us near the old Post Office,
in front of the entrance to the underground
car park. Closed Wednesdays

5. The earliest fossil cockroach is about 280
million years old – 80 million years older than
the first dinosaurs!

6. Cockroach can live up to nine days without
its head.
7. Cockroaches are
believed to be the
only life form which
can survive nuclear
fallout.

8. Some female
cockroaches mate
only once but remain
forever,
pregnant
producing up to 150
offspring.
9. The American
cockroach is the
largest and can grow
to be approximately
two inches long.

11. The cockroach spreads disease by walking
and crawling on filthy areas, and then transferring bacteria etc on its feet.
12. Cockroaches wear
their skeletons on the
outside of their bodies.
13. Cockroaches have
six legs and at least 18
knees.
14. There are 5,000
species of cockroaches
worldwide.
15. The ‘Oriental’ cockroach comes from Africa.
16. The H.M.S. “Bounty”
was so infested with
cockroaches that Captain
William Bligh (of ‘Mutiny on the Bounty’ fame),
disinfected the entire ship with boiling water.

Random Joke

55

An Aussie walks into a
pub and takes a seat
next to a very attractive woman. He gives
her a quick glance
then casually looks at
his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, 'Is your date
running late?'
'No', he replies,'I just got this state-of the-art
watch, and I was just testing it.'
The intrigued woman says, 'a state-of-the-art
watch? What's so special about it?'
The Aussie explains, 'It uses alpha waves to
talk to me telepathically.'
The lady says, 'What's it telling you now?'
Well, it says you're not wearing any panties.'
The woman giggles and replies, 'Well it must
be broken because I am wearing panties!'
The Aussie smiles, taps his watch and says,
'Bloody thing's an hour fast!1

Sharkys Watersports is based in Torrox,
and offers boat trips along the coast: west
past the fishing port of La Caleta to Torre
de Mar, or eastwards to the famous Balcon
de Europe at Nerja and onwards past the
beautiful bay of La Herradura. Visit the
team's favourite bar/restaurant El Barco in
Marina Del Este and go on towards the castle at Almunecar. The choice is yours.

Tony (Sharky), the owner and skipper, has
been water skiing for more than 30 years and
holds an international certificate of competence
as a ski boat driver, parascending instructor
certificate and an RYA 1&2 for power pleasure
craft. “Prior to launching, we check weather
conditions using two different sites,” he says.
“Should we decide that conditions are not safe,
we reserve the right cancel the charter for your
safety. We will always telephone you the day
of charter to confirm.”

Discover the beautiful coastline of La Herradura, which boasts one of the prettiest bays
in Europe. View the famous Balcon de Europe
in Nerja from the sea. Enjoy an exciting speedboat trip on a day out where you can swim in
crystal clear waters, snorkel and explore the

colourful marine life. Or you could just relax
and sunbathe in one of the secluded sheltered
coves along this beautiful unspoilt coastline.

“Our extensive range of watersports equipment
includes wakeboards, water-skis, ringos,
screamers and knee boards,” says Sharky.
“With every activity option, we provide tuition
and guidance for those who need it, ensuring
you all get the most out of the activities. If some
of your group aren't sure about wakeboarding
or waterskiing, then there is no problem: there
is plenty of enjoyment to be had from the boat,
taking in great views and your mates’ efforts!
The ringos/screamers are one of the most popular options with the chance to get in the water
together and hang on. We guarantee great
laughs and memories; fancy dress is optional.
Bring along your camera or video to capture
those special moments.

“There are free ‘sharkyswatersports’ tee shirts
and a bottle of bubbly for ‘hens or stags.’ All occasions are catered for, including children's
parties etc. We take a maximum of six people
on the boat, although we can cater for larger
groups.
Call for details.”

Showing all major sports
Early opening for Rugby
World Cup games with
a free bacon/sausage bap!

Nicky, Kim and staff would like to welcome you to Bar Atila

For information or
bookings please call:

663 393 987
C/Buena Vista,

C/Buena Vista,
Puente don Manuel

58

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

The Word Queen

11. What is this character’s date of birth?
What traits does he/her have of his/her astrological sign?
12. How would a stranger describe this
character?

Hello fellow writers, this month I have prepared an effective creative writing exercise
to help you to develop your characters...
have fun with it!
Take one of your book’s most important characters and concentrate on him / her when completing this creative writing exercise. Answer
each of these questions thoroughly, expanding
your responses where possible to include other
questions that may arise.
1. What do you know about this character
now that s/he doesn’t know?
2. What is this character’s greatest
personality flaw?
3. What do you know about this character that
s/he would never admit?
4. What songs does this character sing when
no one else is around?
5. What is this character’s favourite film?
6. What is this character’s secret dream?
7. What is this character’s best achievement?
8. What is this character’s deepest regret?
9. What is this character’s greatest fear?
10. Describe this character’s bedroom.
Include three loved items.

Do you see how answering the questions about
each of your characters in this creative writing
exercise has opened doors where before there
were only brick walls?

If you complete this exercise with all your main
characters, you’ll find that your book is completed in far less time, as you’ll feel like your
characters are friends you’ve had for years.
For more creative writing exercises like
this one, plus lots of amazing creative
writing tuition log on to:
http://www.writeyourbookmasterclass.com
and sign up to my 26-week writing, publishing and book
marketing course…
Love & Light,
The Word Queen xx

Flavour

LEARN TO COOK IN SPAIN

VaCatiONs with
Reserve your
space today!

One day cookery class The Path to Paella
During this one day class
starting at 10am with a
discussion of the historical
origins of Paella in Spain.
After the methods of preparing a traditional paella will

NEW one day class
Tapas & Wine Pairing

Spend an afternoon in a
whitewashed village nestled along the
Andalucían coast with Christopher
learning a brief history of tapas and
hands-on preparing 6 different tapas.
After, Jean Paul will guide you
be reviewed. The group will then
visit the village of Torrox Pueblo through 5 different wines to pair
and seek fresh farm
with the tapas you just created.
produce to make their Paella
40€ per person
lunch. Then enjoy Sangria,
Paella, Salad & Flan 10am - 4pm Call: 627 168 943

www.LearnToCookinSpain.com

ur

Vanessa´s Traditional Sunday Roast to share
Daytime or evening
Chicken, Pork or Beef served with a choice of traditional
trimmings or jacket potato & salad. Always very popular
so book early! 3 courses from 20€ per couple

Saturday 10th September - ‘Happy Saturday’ Happy Hour between
9pm and 10pm - Come and meet our newest member of staff, Chef Andrew
Friday 23rd September - Pudding Night! Come and enjoy those lovely
sweets you never have room for but crave
Come to our popular quiz every Thursday.
Enjoy good food, good fun and above all a good laugh!!

OPENING HOURS
Tuesday - Friday from 6pm
1pm Saturday & Sunday

Private functions catered for

Calle Vienteocho de Febrero Riogordo

(Turn right and right again at the Painted Star on the road)

Call: 620 3535 94
Find us on

Friday Market
Chiringuito Carlos
(formerly Chiringuito Antonio)

Puente Don Manuel Every Friday 10am - 1.30pm

rastro and
Car Booters
always
welcome

Bacon roll (English Bacon) and a Coffee - only 2.50€

If you have something interesting to sell and
would like to join us at the market as a
stallholder call Karen: 674 526 968

Stall of the month - “JUst 4 PEts”

is focused on providing high-quality dog treats and other pet products from well
known branded manufacturers, who already
provide quality service and customer satisfaction
in both Spain and the UK. We do everything we
can to meet your expectations. We live, love and
celebrate our four-legged friends. From the time
and care we give to our own dogs, to the nutrition
and taste we ensure are in the
products that we supply. Our
activities are based on the belief
that our customers' needs are of
the utmost importance. We are
committed to meeting those needs
and as a result, a high percentage of our business is from repeat customers and
referrals. We would welcome the opportunity to earn your trust and deliver the
products that you desire in an area close to where you live, or regularly visit. We
never stop trying to do better. We hope that you and your best friend will notice the
difference when dealing with us. With a large variety of products to choose from,
we are sure you will be happy.
We also support CHAIN and CAS Animal Charities at their annual Dog Shows and events

ARKWRIGHTS

The British Store & More
Your No. 1 Stop Shop
Open 7 days a week

MAKE SURE YOU MAKE THE RIGHT
MOVE & TURN RIGHT AT VENTA BAJA
CROSSROADS TO ARKWRIGHT’S

WE ARE THE LAST SHOP ON THIS PARADE
WE ARE HAVING A STORE RESHUFFLE! GEOFF IS
EXTENDING HIS FREEZER SECTION, DUE TO IT’S
EVER INCREASING POPULARITY AND NEW ITEMS.
SEPTEMBER OFFER 10% OFF ALL CRISPS AND 15% OFF ALL
BISCUITS. PLUS THE LOYALTY CARD IS BACK!
DROP IN AND SEE OUR EVER CHANGING IN-STORE
SEPTEMBER OFFERS (WITHOUT CONDITIONS!)
WE LEAD AND OTHERS FOLLOW.
WEEK IN, WEEK OUT, WE HAVE ALL YOUR
REQUIREMENTS ALL YEAR ROUND, SO CALL BY ANY DAY
september Opening hours:
Monday - saturday 9am - 7.30pm
sunday 10am - 4 pm

ARKWRIGHTS

RIGHT
TA BAJA
HT’S
PARADE

EOFF IS
TO IT’S
W ITEMS.

15% OFF ALL
BACK!

N-STORE
TIONS!)

OUR
BY ANY DAY

Where you are Number ONE
Not one of a number
Puente don Manuel

SEPTEMBER
h
a
r
w
O
O
D
s

L
M
L
E
a

a
t
a
k
s

a
h
i
N
i

N
C
O
N
E
r

C
V
i
t
i
E
s

NEW IN-STORE - PLANTS
INCLUDING ORCHIDS.
ALSO IN SEPTEMBER CHRISTMAS CARDS AND
DIARIES AVAILABLE

r
a
M
L
E
y
a
P
P
L
E
s

C
C
L
E
s

C
a
k
E
s

O
w
N
t
r
E
E
s

WE ONLY CLOSE TWO DAYS OF THE YEAR, CHRISTMAS DAY
& NEW YEAR’S DAY, WE DO NOT CLOSE FOR SPANISH
OR BRITISH HOLIDAYS

the Parcel Force to
be reckoned with

Sending or Collecting items from
UK or Europe

952 519 780

we accept all major credit cards
Find us on the web:
www.arkwrights-groceries.com

68

To advertise call 664 210 468

Psychic Medium Energy Healer

They call me the accidental psychic. My
own psychic and healing journey has made
me healthy. I had suffered from IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) for 25 years and many
doctors, tests and treatments never found a
cure. However, since I started in this field
only three years ago, I no longer suffer from
it and for that I am truly thankful.
While tuning in to people’s auras, I never discriminate between life and death for the feelings I get from them are equal. Protection by
your family, pets and friends is always around
you, and the good thoughts they send -whether they are living or have moved to the
other side -- are in your aura.

I then go deeper into their energy and feel their
thoughts. When they have passed to the other
side, I deliver messages reassuring you they
are still helping, watching and are happy, but
most of all they want you to be happy. I recall
one summer’s afternoon when a lovely lady
came for a future reading and Prama healing.
She was a little nervous that something bad
might come out from my reading, but I reassured her that my work does not give bad messages. I see how to make difficult situations
and decisions easier,and most of all, I like to
look into giving you options which make you
happier and stronger. If there is a future problem, I do my very best to stop it from occurring,
but of course the decision is always yours to
make.
While I tuned into this lady’s aura, I picked up
her daughter’s energy and knew there was a
small issue which needed my attention. While
I was speaking, I got a sharp pain in my stomach. It got very bad and I needed to stop my
work and go deeper. I then felt it ease and
knew what I had to say.
I asked this lady to go with her daughter to the
doctor for a check up. A week went by and then
a message appeared on my emails saying that
they had gone to the doctor who had said her
daughter’s pancreas was not working correctly,
and if she hadn’t gone, it could have been very
bad.
Remember magic is always around...just stop
for a moment in your busy life and listen; you
never know, you just might feel something!
THE ACCIDENTAL PSYCHIC
www.markbajerski.com
markbajerski@hotmail.com
Facebook Mark Bajerski

B O a r D i N g C at t E ry
Canillas de aceituno

We offer safe,
tranquil accomodation
for your cat.
Our pens are safe and secure but with all the
comforts of home, making it very cosy.
Only 20 mins from Torre del Mar, inland
towards Vinuela, Campo Cats is a short 2 min
drive from a main tarmac road which gives
very good access.
We welcome inspection visits where we can
discuss your cat’s personal needs.
We only accept cats that are fully vaccinated
Also, we can provide a collection & delivery
service.
For further details, call Linda on: 665 510 735
www.campocats.com

The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and
I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner.
Talk about Dyson with death.

said I love you.
She said is that you or the beer talking?
I replied it's me talking to the beer.

I've just had a letter back from Screwfix.
They said they regretted to inform me that
they're not actually a dating agency.

The wife has been missing a week now. Police
said to prepare for the worst.
So I have been to the charity shop to get all her
clothes back.

My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker.
Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet.
What's the difference between Iron Man and
Iron Woman?
One's a superhero and the other is an instruction.
I was explaining to my wife last night that when
you die you get reincarnated but must come
back as a different creature.
She said she would like to come back as a
cow.
I said you're obviously not listening.

Hi mate I don't want you to panic but I'm texting
you from the casualty.
Turns out the new Dyson Ball cleaner isn't what
I thought it was.
What is a calorie?
Calories are the little bastards that get into your
wardrobe at night and sew your clothes
tighter...
MY CLOSET IS INFESTED WITH THE LITTLE
SHITS.
Spurs have just signed a new black Italian
striker. Grabatelli

Saturday 15th October - “OKTOBERFEST”
Pork knuckle, Live music with “FRED”
Bavarian Specials
Crispy Duck with all the trimmings - only 12.50€
Home made food available for Take Away (vacuum packed on the premises)

Private functions catered for with Special Menus
Open 9am - 11pm (closed Tuesdays)

If a mirror reverses right and left, why doesn't it
reverse up and down?
How do you know if honesty is the best policy
unless you've tried some of the others?
If humans have nightmares, what do horses
have?
What do you call a bedroom with no bed in it?

How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink?

Instead of wasting time hunting and cooking,
why don't hunters just use flame-throwers?
How does a person with a lisp pronounce that
word?
How does a thermos know whether a drink
should be hot or cold?

74

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Benamargosa

Benamargosa is a lively village that stands at
the heart of the Vélez-Málaga region and dates
back to the 15th century to the time of the
Moriscos, Moorish converts to Christianity. As
you drive past Axarquia airport the scenery
changes to a lush, tropical paradise, resplendently verdant with avocado and mango trees
vying for attention between lemon and orange
groves. The mostly dry river bed winds its way
past Triana village until it comes
to Benamargosa bridge, Puente
de los diez ojos, so named because of the 10 arches or eyes,
its hard to imagine that only 6
years ago the water actually
came over the top of this bridge
after a few days of particularly
heavy rainfall which flooded
most of the lower part of the village. Usually dry the river bed is
used as a road for the farmers who work the
land on either side and the many residents who
have houses dotted along it from Triana to
Cútar. Most days you find goats, mules, donkeys and horses lazily passing along it. Just
opposite the bridge are lovely gardens with an
avenue of trees and flowers, a central fountain
featuring 4 naked girls, a childrens play area
and a municipal swimming pool with sunbathing area, childs pool and cafeteria. The annual Fiesta del Campo erects a stage close to
the bridge where performers entertain all night
and visitors are offered Baticates, the local
drink of avocado, cinnamon and a host of secret ingredients, followed later by an enormous
paella with beer and wine.

Now at the entrance to the village driving from
Triana there is a new monument showing the
bridge with avocados and lemons! there are
fan palms on either side of the road and a village garden with benches where the old men
sit and chat the morning away!

In the lower part of the village is the Church of
St.Mary of the Incarnation where baptisms took
place as early as 1546. This church has an interesting piece of architecture where a huge
archway joins the church to a neighbouring
house!

As you walk onwards and upwards through the village there
are several long straight streets
and other more narrow ones that
weave their way across. There is
a lovely square where the old
town hall used to be with a pretty
fountain and some very old
houses some of which have been
beautifully renovated. Higher up
are the gardens of San Sebastián
with stone steps leading up and through a narrow passageway dividing two houses, you can
rest in these gardens as the town hall have
thoughtfully provided several benches.
Attached to the new town hall is a 24 hour
health clinic, a little further on is the village
school and there are plenty of bars and restaurants that serve healthy, local cuisine. This village is on the route of sun and avocados and is
37 kilometres from Málaga at a height of 100
metres. Market day is Wednesday from 9am
until 2pm and is held in the car park by the
bridge and even under the bridge!
Sally Harrison - Axarquia Properties

Property Of The Month - AS2320 Benamargosa 59,000 €

Delightful, bright and sunny fully renovated and extended one bedroom village house. Walking distance to
all amenities in the popular village of Benamargosa with a lovely roof terrace for outside dining or catching
the last rays of the sun on a balmy summers evening. The property is reached via steps leading up from a
parking area and comprises kitchen, lounge, inner hallway and internal patio, Morrocan shower room, stairs
to the bedroom and roof terrace. This bijou abode enjoys terracotta tiled floors throughout, beamed ceilings
and has been sympathetically restored retaining many original features. Great value. Must be seen!

PrOPErty sPECiaLists siNCE 2001
iF yOU haVE PrOPErty tO sELL

CaLL saLLy ON 626 038 851 or 952 436 781

sally harrison
Owner / agent

AS2539 Torrox Park
230,000€

AS2538 Salto de Negro
279,000€

AS2537
Alcaucín
698,000€

AS2536
Pulgarin
475,000€

AS2136 Benamargosa
105,000€

AS2508
Comares
245,000€

Email: sallyharrison@axarquiaproperties.com

85m2 2 bedroom villa
with a glazed terrace
leading out to garden
with sea views

We have now been Screening the
Costas and Inland for 9 years
We manufacture all types of screens,
any shape, any colour
Magnetic - Aluminium Sliders Roller Screens - American Swing Doors
and Patio/Balcony Enclosures

Famous for - Being a very wealthy tropical tax
haven.
interesting Facts - Christopher Columbus, in
the service of Spain, discovered the islands in
1503. Columbus named the islands Las Tortugas as there were many giant turtles in the surrounding seas. Later, the islands were
renamed Caymanas from the Carib word for
crocodile.
The Cayman Islands have more registered
businesses than they have people.
The Islands are the 5th largest banking centre
in the world.
The island of Grand Cayman, which lies largely
unprotected at sea level, was hit by Hurricane
Ivan on 11–12 September 2004. Ivan's storm
surge completely over-washed Grand Cayman, and an estimated 95% of the buildings on
the island were either damaged or destroyed.

Claims to fame: One of the first ‘supermodels’, Elle’s career began in 1982 and by 1986,
Time magazine had already put her on the
cover (with a feature entitled "The Big Elle").
She had also appeared on the covers of Elle,
GQ, Harper's Bazaar, Vogue, and Playboy.
With Naomi Campbell, she co-hosted the Miss

Universe 2001 pageant. She made a record six
cover appearances on the Sports Illustrated
Swimsuit magazine, beginning in the 1980s,
and founded a series of business ventures including Elle Macpherson Intimates, a lingerie
line, and "The Body,” a line of skin care products.

She has also made numerous film appearances and last year, became the host and executive producer of Britain and Ireland's Next
Top Model.

Facts
1. At the age of 17, Elle enrolled to study law in
Sydney but travelled to America on a ‘gap’ year
to earn money to pay for her law books. She
did not leave for 20 years.
2. Married Giles Bensimon, the creative director of Elle magazine, when she was 21 and he
was 20 years older; they were divorced in
1989.
3. She has had relationships with Billy Joel,
Kevin Costner and Bryan Adams

4. Her sons are called Arpad Flynn Alexander
Busson (born 14th February 1998), and Aurelius Cy Andrea Busson (born 4th February
2003). Elle called off her planned wedding to
their father, French financier Arpad Busson, in
2005 after a 10-year relationship.
5. In 1994, set up her own company Elle
MacPherson Inc.
6. Macpherson made her movie debut playing
an artist's model in the 1994 Sirens, which also
starred Hugh Grant, Sam Neill and Tara
FitzGerald.
7. She also appeared in Woody Allen’s Alice,
Batman & Robin alongside George Clooney;
The Edge with Anthony Hopkins, and The Mirror Has Two Faces with Barbra Streisand.
8. In 1999, Elle appeared in five episodes of
the American TV series Friends, as Joey's
roommate and girlfriend, Janine Lecroix.
9. She designed a highly-successful maternity
bra while nursing her second child.
10. She speaks fluent French and conversational Italian and Spanish.
11. Elle spends most of her time in Britain.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Allotment

What with the heat, the fact that we've now
moved our plot to Mezquitilla, and a burst
of low energy and general summer laziness,
Kami and I haven't bothered tending to our
new veggie patch yet.
Jose and his team have dug up a new allotment for us and they've even covered it in plastic. This is a weed preventation method as we
grew so sick of having to pull them all up every
time we went, especially during the rainy
spells. So the patch is sitting there waiting for
us to get into gear and begin planting some
lovely vegetables....

This is the thrilling conclusion to a
phenomenal cinematic story 10
years in the telling. Raised to maturity under the well-tempered direction of David Yates and the wise
screenwriting of Steve Kloves, the
saga culminates in a finale as satisfying and emotionally intense as
it is visually grand.

When the story resumes, Harry,
Ron, and Hermione (Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, and Emma
Watson) continue their mission,
established in Part 1, to destroy
the rest of the seven magical Horcruxes that contain pieces of the soul of the beall and end-all of evil, Lord Voldemort. But time

DAMP!

is running out. Hogwarts is under siege. Harry
observes others sacrificing their lives to protect
him and wrestles with his obligations, not only
as a wizard but as a man.
Former professor Severus Snape emerges as
a key player in Harry's fate. In
the end Harry and his friends
are, of course, much older
than when they first caught the
Hogwarts Express from Platform 9 ¾. And yet, united with
their classmates and teachers
to defend the school that
shaped them they're still very
young. Harry Potter and the
Deathly Hallows — Part 2
leaves us with the dawning
recognition that the world is
huge, fraught, enigmatic, magical, dangerous, delightful,
and, ultimately, the responsibility of young people who
must first find their footing.
Star Rating: *****/*****

Using our new unique quality water barrier, all the above situations can
be avoided. We will fully treat the terrace including any wall/floor joints
to give a long lasting barrier against surface water penetration.

FOR 299€ No Extras

A fraction of the cost of a re-tile
You Know It Makes Sense
Internal Damp Proofing Systems controlling Rising
and Penetrating Damp also available - DIY or Fitted.

Tel:
617 993 674
For a Free Survey NOW
Price subject to survey

83

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com
New in Axarquia this month...

What’s New?

Ever wanted to learn how to cook a proper
Paella, or pairing tapas with wine? Well ‘Learn
to Cook in Spain’ offer one day courses including “A path to Paella” and
“Tapas & Wine Pairing”. The Paella
course starts at 10am and looks at
the history of Paella, followed by a
trip to Torrox Pueblo to seek fresh
farm produce to make your Paella
lunch, then enjoy Sangria, Paella,
Salad & Flan. For the Tapas & Pairing you spend an afternoon in a
whitewashed village nestled along
the Andalucían coast learning a
brief history of tapas and hands-on preparing 6
different tapas. After, you will be guided
through 5 different wines to pair with the tapas
you just created.
See main advert on page 58
Prestige Imports was established to import
quality goods from all across India, China and

Asia for European suppliers to sell at substantial profits. Due to the efficiency of their purchasing strategy, they have sourced the best
suppliers in these countries. Consequently,
they have access to all types of marketable
products, from Harry Potter wands
to top-of-the range All Terrain Buggies. To help you grow your own retail business, they are offering a
gateway direct to the Asian manufacturers.

See page 51

At Team Xtreme, they've evaluated
and selected the most breathtaking
outdoor adventure activities. They
are suitable for different ages and abilities and
all are provided by experienced and qualified
professionals in their respective fields, so
you're guaranteed to have the best possible
experience. All of their more than thirty activities to choose from are available in Andalucía
with a superb all-year-round Mediterranean climate.
See page 8

Get your fangs dug into these…!
• Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of
their unwanted people without killing them use
to burn their houses down - hence the expression "to get fired."
• Canada is an Indian word meaning "Big Village".
• There are two credit
cards for every person
in the United States.
• The most common name in the world is Mohammed.
• The word "samba" means "to rub navels to
gether."
• The international telephone dialing code for
Antarctica is 672.
• The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on
Berlin during World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
• More people are killed
annually by donkeys
than die in air crashes.
• The average person
falls asleep in seven minutes.
• Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out
of cotton.
• An ostrich's eye is bigger that it's brain.
• The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.

• If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9
months, enough gas is produced to create the
energy of an atomic bomb.
• The human heart creates enough pressure
when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood
30 feet.
• Banging your head against a wall uses 150
calories an hour. (so what are you waiting for?)
• Humans and dolphins are the only species
that have sex for pleasure.
• On average people fear spiders more than
they do death.
• You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.
• Americans on the average eat 18 acres of
pizza every day.
• Did you know that you are more likely to be
killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider?
• In ancient Egypt, Priests plucked EVERY hair
from their bodies, including their eyebrows and
eyelashes.
• A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (not sure
how they found this out...hmmmmm)
• A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
• Polar bears are left handed. (ever tried shaking hands with the polar bears?!)
• The flea can jump 350
times its body length, that is
like a human jumping the
length of a football field.
• Butterflies taste with their
feet.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Random Joke :)

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in
love. When it became apparent that we would
marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave
up baked beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car
broke down on the way home from work. Since
I lived in the countryside I called my husband
and told him that I would be late because I had
to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small
diner and the odour of baked beans was more
than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured
that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I
reached home, so I stopped at the diner and
before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made
sure that I released all the gas.
Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited
to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling
I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair
at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he
was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch
the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call.
The baked beans I had consumed were still af-

85
105

fecting me and the pressure was becoming
most unbearable, so while my husband was
out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted
my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not
only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck
running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood
mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned
the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to
the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The
stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for
another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone
farewells signalled the end of my freedom, I
quickly fanned the air a few more times with my
napkin and placed it on my lap feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologising
for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked
through the blindfold, and I assured him I had
not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and
twelve dinner guests seated around the table
chorused: "Happy Birthday!" I Fainted!!!

NERJ

Nerja is renowned for its friendly, efficient local businesses, caring charities and all-round
community spirit. It makes sense to support the best of the best, so check these out!
If your car needs repairing, or you want to have it spray painted, visit Jonathan at artucolor for
the best price and service. Artucolour is a general mechanics workshop offering car body repairs
and body painting.

rafters rastro â&#x20AC;&#x201C; New 2 You Shop. We buy and sell your unwanted household items. We sell a
huge variety of goods which are changing every day. Normally we have in stock; a wide range of
furniture, lamps, vases, ornaments, general bric a brac, books and good quality second-hand
clothes. Contact Alan or Wendy.

Visit ink and Chips on C/Perez. They have all that you need for your PC, such as ink cartridges
and peripherals as well as laptop and printer sales. They also offer technical service 365 days a
year.

Dentadanes Dental Clinic offer top-quality Danish dental care at Spanish prices; a successful
concept they have used since they were established in 1991. Open Monday - Friday 10am - 5pm.
They speak English, Danish / Scandinavian, German, Spanish and Italian.

Come and see Glenn and Carlos at the Big garage. With more than 40 years experience as mechanics, they speak English and Spanish and specialise in Land Rovers and 4 x 4s. They can also
give your car a full service. They use genuine Bearmach Land Rover parts and accessories,

ERJA

and they're easy to find. As you head down from the motorway, turn right at the new Lidl exit, keep
right and you’ll see them straight in front of you. Open all day Monday - Friday, from 9am to 5pm.

Olas - Sat 3rd Sept Olas charity quiz compered for the first time by Coastline Radio DJ Mr John
Tea Two Sugars Holmes. Max teams of 6, book to avoid disappointment. Includes 1/2 time buffet. 3€ entry 7.30 for 8pm start. Raffle and money raised will go to ‘Help for Heros, Cudeca and
the local Donkey Sanctuary. Footy - England play two euro qualifiers on Fri 2nd away to Bulgaria
at 7pm followed by Wales at Wembley - Tues 6th at 9pm. The 9th - start of the Rugby World Cup
in New Zealand, 10th - 10-30am, 18th - 8am, 24th - 9-30am, 1/10 - 10-30am. We will show as
many games as possible and will open on a few days early as per attendance and game. Ask if
you want to catch an early game and we will try to accommodate. Special Rugby breakfast
throughout the World Cup come see and sample. The F1 season continues on the 11th - Italian
Grand Prix, 25th - Singapore both around 2pm. Champions league starts on 13 -14th / 27th 28th.
Full Premier League coverage with as many as 4 games at any one time. We will arrange another impromptu beach 5 aside comp, keep an eye on our billboard and facebook Olas Bar. Pool
league starts at the end of the month as current champions we look forward to the challenge.
Blue Med Cafe Bar situated in Burriana Beach have an exciting and new menu this summer, with
a superb selection of fresh sandwiches, baguettes, wraps and filled pittas. Open everyday from
11am til late with a multi screen TV showing all major sporting events.

Locked yourself out of your house or having lock problems? Call the 24 hour emergency locksmith, a fully-qualified UK C&G tradesman. Or, simply call to book an appointment.

Due to considerable reader demand here
are some more Tommy Cooper one liners.
Yes, he was brilliant!!
1. Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd
think at least one of them would have seen it.
2. Phone answering machine
message - '...If you want to buy
marijuana, press the hash key...'

9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak
were chilly. They lit a fire in the
craft, it sank, proving once and for
all that you can't have your kayak
and heat it.

3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist
wearing only clingfilm for shorts.
The shrink says, 'Well, I can
clearly see you're nuts.'
4. I went to buy some camouflage
trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet
him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off
the top shelf. He said, 'No, the steaks are too
high.'

6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A

himself.

10. Our ice cream man was found
lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped

11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry
growing out of his head.
Doc says 'I'll give you some cream to put on it.'
15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom,
boom!

There is a medical distinction. We've all
heard about people having guts or balls, but
do you really know the difference between
them?

93
105

It's everyone's fave time....share'oscope
time!
This months share Bahamas Petroleum Co.
Bought 11,111 @ 9p. They are an oil and gas
company with 100% owned offshore licence
permits in the Commonwealth of the Bahamas.

In an effort to keep you informed, the definitions
are listed below:

gUts - Is arriving home late after a night out
with the boys, being
met by your wife with a
broom, and having the
guts to ask: ''Are you
still cleaning, or are
you
flying
somewhere?'

Last months share Herencia Resources
bought at 2.20p now 1.90p.

Mr Share’oscope has advised, “I will still provvide a share of the month, but my advice is to
keep away from the market unless you buy
quality companies’ shares after a sharp downturn then sell if you make a quick profit. Over
the long term stay away until the whole dept
problem has improved which may be some
considerable time.

BaLLs - Is coming home late after a night out
with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer,
lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the
arse and having the balls to say: ''You're next,
fatty.''

PLEASE NOTE The investments we make
are fictitious. Profits are not guaranteed, so
please only invest what you can afford to
lose!

I hope this clears up any confusion on the
definitions. Medically speaking, there is no
difference in the outcome, since both ultimately result in death."

Do You Care ?

$$$

.

Care working in the UK - Country Cousins is the UK’s leading private care
specialist introduction agency, providing live-in care mainly for the elderly
and infirm, enabling people to remain in their own homes for longer

Many Country Cousins live here in Spain returning to the UK frequently or every now
and then for two weeks or more assignments.
If you are interested in earning between £945 - £1,200 for 15 days (one client)
or £1,020 - £1,560 (two clients) by becoming a Country Cousin,
please call Jennie or Barry for more information on: 625 807 504
or 952 115 305 (evenings)

94

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

BEM idiomas

By the time you read this article there will
only be approximately twelve days of the
school summer holidays left. “Thank goodness," many of you will say.
However, how many of you decided to spend
the summer starting those all important Spanish lessons which will enable you to enjoy life in
Spain much more?
Maybe summer wasn´t a great time for you
with the children off school, or maybe it was
just too hot for you to even breathe! But now
that we're in September you can´t use those
excuses anymore!
Personally, I'm so happy I started Spanish lessons, as before whenever someone spoke to
me in Spanish I always responded with “Do
you speak English”. I had become so used to
saying this that it had become a habit. I didn´t
even try to understand what was being said.
However, now I ask, “can you repeat that, or
can you speak slowly”. This way I try and understand and converse.
What I like about BEM idiomas in Velez Malaga
and my teacher Sandra, is that she doesn´t

School of Languages

sPaNish LEssONs

LEARN SPANISH WITH EXPERIENCED TEACHERS

Practical and useful lessons to help gain
self confidence and making your life easier.
From 2 hours per week / small groups or one to one
Study for the Spanish Diploma - D.E.L.E.
Prepare yourself for professional life; something great
on your CV; or simply just for you

push me. She teaches at my pace and goes
over things again and again until I've cracked it!
Even at thirty-four-years-old, it´s definitely a
struggle to learn a language, so never think
that you're too old. Always remember that
learning something is better than learning nothing!
BEM idiomas in Velez Malaga is now open
in the mornings from 10am - 2pm and in the
evenings from 5pm - 8.30pm and from the
12th September from 10am - 1pm and 4 8.30pm.
So pop in and speak to Viviane.

96

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Incest- a question of belief

Mind, Body & Spirit

This month I’m addressing the issue of incest
which, though it is rarely discussed, is nonetheless far more widespread than we might like to
believe. I’ve been prompted to do so by the
large number of my own clients who have been
subjected to this most pernicious and devastating form of abuse, and the added struggle
they face whilst recovering and healing, both to
believe in themselves and to be believed by
others.

Father- daughter incest, by far the most common form, is such an unnatural travesty of a
healthy parental relationship that it is extremely
difficult to believe. Yet the statistics show that
one in four adults have experienced some form
of sexual abuse as children, and in many cases
the perpetrator is a parent. This means that
whilst it may not have happened to you, the
chances are that it has happened to someone
you know.
So why don’t we hear about it more often? Why
are we not, as a society, more aware of the
scale of the problem, and more sympathetic to
its victims?

Most cases of incest go unreported, and those
that are may only be reported long after the
event. This is because in the majority of cases,
the young girl (and they may be very young indeed) is so physically and emotionally overwhelmed by the (often repeated) experience of
being sexually abused and violated by her father that, having no other way of escaping the
pain and terror, she literally leaves her body.
Her consciousness retreats to a safer vantage
point, disconnecting her conscious mind from
the unbearable sensations and feelings that
are flooding her little body. This is, by definition,

traumatic – ie: the experience remains unregistered and unrecorded by the conscious mind.
It is “frozen experience.” Usually, the memories, and the impulse to divulge them, are further buried by the demands of the father, often
backed up by dire threats that she must not tell
anyone what has happened.

It may take years, and often decades before a
woman reaches a point in her life when she is
able to reconnect to her memories. In the interim, she will probably have struggled with an
array of problems: irrational feelings of repulsion or fear around her father; difficulty and discomfort with adult sexual relations; outright
withdrawal from all and any sexual contact;
deep feelings of worthlessness, of being bad
or dirty inside; self-hatred, often directed at her
physical body and appearance, and a tendency
to become involved in abusive relationships
are some of the most common.
When she does finally embark on healing and
remembering, she faces another huge problem. She must believe the unbelievable: that
her father, who should have loved and protected her, could do such a thing. This is made
still harder in the context of a society which
prefers not to believe that such things can happen.

If you know, or suspect, that you may have
been the victim of incest, please feel free to
contact me in confidence.
Richard will be present at the Mind Body Spirit
gathering on Saturday 10th September from 210pm at the boatyard bar, playazo beach, nerja
– www.boatyardbar.com for directions.
To book a session call: 676 346 402,
email:rwaterborn@eircom.net
or see his advert below:

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Readers Writes

Sirs, Having seen the riots on TV last week I
have a few suggestions regarding what could
help the youth of today if the politicions had the
BALLS to address the problem? If youths aged
16-20yrs. (both female and male) are not in education or employment, they are sent to an organisation for four years. A kind of "Boot Camp"
This would have to be run on the lines of the
military, whereby they be given a uniform,
would be taught discipline, education and the
ability to live in harmony with their fellows.
They would also be taught how to be domesticated ie. cleaning of their accommodation, together with personal hygiene, which would give
them a sense of personal pride.

Sports would of course, be a very lerge part of
their training and from this who knows what future champions would be out there. By participating in sports, this would also teach them
how to use their energy for a better purpose
than roaming the streets, drug taking and so on
and so forth. Trades could be taught i.e. bricklaying, plumbing, hairdressing, painting, etc.

97

and upon their return to society they would
stand a much better chance of procuring employment. They would of course get a wage.
If by participating in the above, they then get a
better sense of living in the community , all the
better.
And maybe we should take more heed to the
old saying
SPARE THE ROD and SPOIL THE CHILD.
Brian James Turner SPAIN

98

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Apologies

Over the past few months I have published
some inappropriate pictures and jokes and it
has appeared to upset some readers who have
accused me of being sexist and shallow..
If you were one of these people, please accept
my sincerest apologies.
In future, I will only post content with a cultural
or educational theme such as old monuments,
nature and other interesting topics.
Below is a picture of the Pont Neuf Bridge in

At La Vaqueria Fri 9th September Curry night
8pm. Every Friday the ladies dining group
meet to enjoy a set menu two course vegetarian meal for just 5€. Great food, friendly, informal atmosphere from 7pm. Every Thursday
from 11am - 1pm the Arts & Crafts Class offers
professional tuition in all aspects of crafting,
oils, pastels and watercolours. For reservations and enquiries see contact details on
main advert below.
Heather Gail Harmen’s drawing and painting
classes. Puente don Manuel every MondayTorre del Mar every Thursdays and Lake
Viñuela every Friday. Call 952 115 366 / 628
306 371 for details.

Nerja History Group meets on the first Friday
of each month at the Cultural Centre, Calle
Granada, Nerja at 11.30. For more information,
contact Jill Christian-Smith on: 952 538 526
664 760 405 jill.christiansmith.gmail.com

Art Exhibition Renate van Nijen 10th Sept to
18th Sept you are invited to view my work at a
solo retrospective exhibition in the Centro
Cívíco in La Herradura. Opening times from
11.00 – 13.30 and 18.00 – 20.00.
www.renate-kunst.nl

Country Market
Los Jardines
del Trapiche

EVERY TUESDAY
9.30 - 1.30

For an extremely organised & fun day
out, join us here at our indoor /
outdoor market. Lots of varied stalls
to browse around and a beautiful
seating area for coffees, teas,
hotdogs and bacon butties, etc.
available at the outside bar
Call Anita 627877164 or Chrissie
617811030 for more information.
www.countrymarketsspain.com

(Junction 272 onto the A356, Vélez Málaga,
turn off at El Cruce towards Benamagosa
and we are just before the private airport)

The "El Valle Asociacion" Based around the
Lake Vinuela & surrounding areas. Meets on
the first Tuesday of the month at 7.30pm at
the Camping Bar on the side of Lake Vinuela
(A356). The club organises events,trips and social functions. For further details and timings
check the web site. www.el-valle.org.
Dancing for the children international dance
circle. Join us for our Premier Dance on Saturday 24th September. Latin American, Ballroom, Pasodoble, Bochata and Disco. All raffle
profit proceeds to the Malaga Childrens Orphanage. El Trapiche Restaurant, 7.30pm.
Tickets 10.50€. Choice of menu, Chicken, Pork
Chop, Rosada. For reservations please call:
English 952 510 096 German 952 965 514

The FHT Axarquia Therapists' Support
Group will meet on Wed 29th Sept at 7.30pm
at The Camping Bar Restaurant, Vinuela when
Barbara and Stuart Wooder will give a presentation on Spiritualism, which includes Healing.
Barbara will give a short talk on Spiritualism,
and do a question and answer session, followed by a hands on healing session by Stuart. Stuart often uses a crystal to support the
healing and if there is time will demonstrate this
as well. All are welcome to join us for this talk
for further details jennywright04@gmail.com,
tel: 952 321 613 or 633 759 988 or
jeanlaguita@hotmail.com, tel: 952 030 611
or 619 978 890.
The Reel Jiggers Open Barn Dance El Cruce
Restaurante 8-10.30pm, Sept and Nov
emailchriscoates129@hotmail.com for dates

Royal British Legion Torre del Mar September Events: 1st Trip to Gibraltar, 9th Supper
dance at Puerta Niza monthly lunch, 22nd
Granada-Science Park or Shopping- and a visit
to Alhambra Palace, 26th Quiz Night & Supper
@Trapiche Rest, 6th October Trip to Gibraltar
We meet every Wednesday at La Vega Rest.
Next to Mercadona Supermarket. Members &
NON members are welcome to come on our
trips and events. For more information Tel
Merryll on 663 658 354. Visit our web site at:
www.rbl-torredelmar.org.uk

RBL - Los Romanes Branch We are still a
branch of the Royal British Legion. We meet
every Tuesday from 12.00 noon until 2.00 pm.
at The Garden Restaurant, La Vinuela. On the
first Tuesday of every month we have menu del
dia at the restaurant. Please feel free to come
and join us any time, you do not have to be a
member. For social contact Lorraine on
952510203. For other contact Margaret on
951 167 600. Visit our web site on www.rbllosromanes.org.uk
APARIV Animal Protection Society quiz
nights with Prizes, Raffles and Food Available
9th September Los Morenos Restaurant in
Rincon de la Victoria 8pm. Tel: Stephen 952
514 671. 21st September at Sands & C in Torrox Costa at 7:30pm. Call 952 967 734. 30th
September at Bar Viva in Torre del Mar 8pm.
Tel: Stephen 952 514 671
Qi Gong and Tai Chi sessions continue to be
held in the area. These gentle exercises work
on the whole body and improve balance, health
and general wellbeing. Call Paul on 653 333
733 for details. Wed, 11am – Bar 02, Colmenar, Thurs, 3pm - El Duende, Los Ventorros,
near Comares and Fri, 11am – Bar Trapiche,
Trapiche, and another class in Rio Gordo at
The Lemon Tree. Call Bradley on 653 333 733
Golfnutz meet every Wednesday at Santa

Clara (Otura, Granada) for golf banter, all abilities welcome. Sense of humour essential. So
if you need a change in 2011 then give us a
call. Call 617 979 640 or caddy master on
858 702 800.

Lux Mundi Music Appreciation Group meets
each Tues from 3.00pm - 5.00pm at the Lux
Mundi Centre, Torre del Mar. September
events 1st Centre reopens for registration for
Spanish classes. 7th Art group restarts. 9th
Trip to Guaro - Candlelight Procession, 12th
Spanish Lesson start. 15th Trip to Gibraltar,
19th German group start. Cuban Dinner to be
held at Lux Mundi Date T.B.A. Every Mon
3pm-5pm German speaking afternoon, Every
Tues Music Appreciation Soc. Every Wed
3pm-5pm Art Group - 5:30 Choir Practice,
Every Fri 11am-1pm Coffee morning & Boutique, Every Sat 5pm Catholic Church service,
Every Sun 10:30am Anglican Service St. Barnabas. Deposits required for all trips & events.
For more information tel 952 54 33 34. Lux
Mundi Avda. Moscatel,1-"I" (Antigua Casa
de la Viña) 29740-Torre del Mar
U3A El Morche. The El Morche University of
the Third Age has a variety of learning groups
each with a leader. Groups meet regularly to
learn in a friendly and enjoyable way. Covering
an area from Rincon to Nerja and inland to
Viñuela and beyond. We take part in debating,
singing, photography, quizzes, walking, computing and much more. Contact us now at
www.u3aelmorche.wordpress.com

RBL - Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday
from 12.30-2.30pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza
restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment and monthly outings, a superb
lunch inc. drinks, and we welcome all new and
existing RBL members. Tel: 603 879 308
www.britishlegion.org.uk/branches/benajarafe
BISC - Benajarafe International Social Club
We meet every Mon 2.30pm at La Esperanza
Cafe/Restaurante, Benajarafe on the coast
road at KM 261, we enjoy social, trips,etc for
all nationalities. August 12th horse racing at
Mijas (coach and entrance 10€) for members,
Call Heather for details 63497565.

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To advertise call 664 210 468 or email sales@thesentinella.com

Yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes have a
great new venue in Torrox Costa. Every Tuesday 8.30pm. Modern Jive is easy, fun and a
great way of meeting new people. |You dont
need a partner come by yourself or bring a
friend. Beginners always welcome. Join us
Tuesday nights at El Ancla de Cirilo, Calle de
Peñoncillo, Torrox Costa on the N-340 between
Nerja and Torrox Costa. info@yojive.com

Trapiche Social Club meet every Wednesday
from 12 noon - 2pm at El Trapiche Restaurant,
Social Activities include card games, skittles,
dominoes and occasionally free bingo. Everyone is welcome to join us members and visitors. September events 7th social meeting,
9th Trip to Carratreca La Luna Mora evening,
14th social meeting, 21st social meeting &
Monthly lunch, 23rd Barn Dance music by The
Reel Jiggers, 28th social meeting. Social Activities booking line – 680 764 130. Further information from the Publicity Office run by
Gordon Reith, by phone 951 239 36 by email
gerrygledhill@yahoo.co.uk or from any Officer or Committee Member.

Joyce, John, Sue & Mike of the 'Come Dancing' team look forward to seeing all their members at the first Cudeca Dance of the new
season on 10th Sept at El Trapiche 7.00pm for
7.30pm cost 10€, fish, chicken or vegetarian
supper included. For meal choice email:
jjmunns@gmail.com or phone new mobile
699 156 471 Thanks to a special donation from
Coraxalia for providing social dance music at
their summer ball at Hotel Vinuela, we start the
new season with 5,000€ already donated to
Cudeca from only 22 dances.

Lake Vinuela Social Club We meet every
Thurs from midday until approx 2.30 at the Bar
Atila in Puente don Manuel to enjoy social activities and meet new like minded friends. We
regularly have a quiz, bingo, surprise events
and presentations, also a monthly lunch at various restaurants in the area. Our aim is to enjoy
ourselves and to raise monies for various local
and international charities and organisations.
September Events: 1st meeting place and
event to be announced, 8th general meeting,
9th Almunecar Market coach trip 10€ per person, 15th general meeting and grand midsummer draw, 16th Treasure Hunt and lunch, 22nd
general meeting, 29th general meeting, 30th
trip to El Torcal (car sharing)shopping trip to

105

What’s O
n?

Gibraltar. Call for details: 636 203 135

Colmenar District Social Club meet on
Wednesdays at the Arco de Sol in Colmenar
from 12.30, all are welcome. We have quizzes
quest speakers and regular trips and events.
Contact Marjorie on 951 163 071

Prince Charles decided to take up walking
every day. At the same street corner he passed
a hooker standing there every day. He learned
to brace himself as he approached her for what
was almost certain to follow.
"One hundred and fifty pounds!" she'd shout.
"No! Five pounds!" He said from the side of his
mouth, just to shut her up.
This ritual between him and the hooker became a daily occurrence.
She'd yell, "One hundred and Fifty pounds!"
He'd yell back, "Five pounds!"
One day, Camilla decided to accompany her
husband. As the couple neared the hooker's
corner, Prince Charles realised she'd bark her
ÂŁ150 offer and Camilla would wonder what
he'd really been doing on all his past outings.
He figured he'd better have a good explanation
for his wife. As they neared the hookerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s corner
he became even more apprehensive than
usual. Sure enough, there she stood. He tried
to avoid eye contact as she watched the pair
pass.
Then, the hooker yelled "See what you get for
five pounds, you tight bastard!"
------------------------------------------------------------A man had just settled into his seat next to the
window on the plane when another man sat
down in the aisle seat and put his black
Labrador Retriever in the middle seat next to
the man. The first man looked very quizzically
at the dog and asked why the dog was allowed
on the plane. The second man explained that
he was from the Police Drugs Enforcement
Agency and that the dog was a 'sniffing dog'.
'His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is.
I'll show you once we get airborne, when I put
him to work.'
The plane took off, and once it has levelled out,
the Policeman said, 'Watch this.'
He told Sniffer to 'search'.
Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle,
and finally sat very purposefully next to a
woman for several seconds.
Sniffer then returned to his seat and put one
paw on the policeman's arm.
The Policeman said, 'Good boy', and he turned

to the man and said, 'That woman is in possession of marijuana, I'm making a note of her
seat number and the authorities will apprehend
her when we land.
'Gee, that's pretty good,' replied the first man.
Once again, the Policeman sent Sniffer to
search the aisles. The Lab sniffed about, sat
down beside a man for a few seconds, returned to its seat, and this time he placed two
paws on the agent's arm.
The Policeman said, 'That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of his seat
number for the police.'
'I like it!' said his seat mate.
The Policeman then told Sniffer to 'search'
again. Sniffer walked up and down the aisles
for a little while, sat down for a moment, and
then came racing back to the agent, jumped
into the middle seat and proceeded to poo all
over the place.
The first man was really disgusted by this behaviour and couldn't figure out how or why a
well-trained dog would behave like that, so he
asked the Policeman, 'What's going on ?'
The Policeman nervously replied, 'He's just
found a bomb.'
------------------------------------------------------------Sally was driving home from one of her business trips, in Northern Arizona, when she saw
an elderly Navajo woman walking on the side
of the road. As the trip was a long and quiet
one, she stopped the car and asked the Navajo
woman if she would like a ride. With a silent
nod of thanks, the woman got into the car. Resuming the journey, Sally tried in vain to make
a bit of small talk with the Navajo woman. The
old woman just sat silently, looking intently at
everything she saw, studying every little detail,
until she noticed a brown bag on the seat next
to Sally.
"What in bag?" asked the old woman.
Sally looked down at the brown bag and said
"It's a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband."
The Navajo woman was silent for another moment or two. Then, speaking with the quiet wisdom of an elder, she said "Good trade . . .."

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109

Jokes h
a ha :)

Mohammed entered his classroom on the first
day of school.
"What's your name?" asked the teacher.
"Mohammed," he replied.
"You're in Australia now," replied the teacher,
"So from now on you will be known as Kevin."
Mohammed returned home after school.
"How was your day, Mohammed?" his mother
asked.
"My name is not Mohammed. I'm in Australia
and now my name is Kevin."
"Are you ashamed of your name? Are you trying to dishonour your parents, your heritage,
and your religion? Shame on you!"
And his mother beat him. Then she called his
father, who beat him again. The next day Mohammed returned to school. The teacher saw
all of his bruises.
"What happened to you, Kevin?" she asked.
"Well Miss, shortly after becoming an Australian, I was attacked by two f**kin' Arabs!â&#x20AC;?
------------------------------------------------------------A crusty old golfer comes in from a round of
golf at a new course and heads into the grill
room. As he passes through the swinging
doors he sees a sign hanging over the bar:
COLD BEER: $2.00
HAMBURGER: $2.25
CHEESEBURGER: $2.50
CHICKEN SANDWICH : $3.50
HAND JOB: $50.00
Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the old golfer walks up to the
bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive
female bartender who is serving drinks to a
couple of sun-wrinkled golfers. She glides
down behind the bar to the old golfer.
"Yes?" she inquires with a wide, knowing smile,
"May I help you?"
The old golfer leans over the bar and whispers,
"I was wondering, young lady," he whispers,
"Are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"
She looks into his eyes with that wide smile
and purrs: "Yes Sir, I sure am.".....

The old golfer leans closer and into her left ear
and says softly, "Well, wash your hands real
good, because I want a cheeseburger."
------------------------------------------------------------Donald Duck and Daisy Duck were spending
the night together in a hotel room and Donald
wanted to have sex with Daisy.
The first thing Daisy asked was, "Do you have
a condom?"
Donald frowned and said, "No."
Daisy told Donald that if he didn't get a condom, they could not have sex.
"Maybe they sell them at the front desk," she
suggested.
So Donald went down to the lobby and asked
the hotel clerk if they had condoms.
"Yes, we do," the clerk said and pulled a box
out from under the counter and gave it to Donald.. "Would you like me to put them on your
bill?"
"Thit No!" Donald quacked, "I'll thuffocate!"
------------------------------------------------------------The other night I was invited out for a night with
the 'girls. I told my husband that I would be
home by midnight, 'I promise!' Well, the hours
passed and the margaritas went down way too
easily. Around 3 a..m., a bit loaded, I headed
for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo
clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3
times. Quickly, realising my husband would
probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times.
I was really proud of myself for coming up with
such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape
a possible conflict with him.
The next morning my husband asked me what
time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'... he didn't
seem pissed off in the least. Phew, I got away
with that one! Then he said 'We need a new
cuckoo clock.' When I asked him why, he said,
'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three
times, then said 'oh shit.' Cuckooed 4 more
times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another
three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and
then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

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110

s
e
g
a
P
e
Puzzl

Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Get Quizical

1. What is a fly agaric?

2. What drink is made from hyson?
3. How many lines of verse are in a tercet?
4. What in Scotland is an orraman?

6. Where is W.E. Gladstone buried?

4. I run over fields and woods all day. Under the
bed at night I sit not alone. My tongue hangs
out, up and to the rear, waiting to be filled in the
morning. What am I?

7. In New Zealand what is a ricker?
8. Lumbricoid refers to which creature?
9. Who composed the one act opera Aleko?
10. What is the capital of St. Lucia?
11. Who was the Roman god of doorways?

Easy

2. Throw me off the highest building, and I'll not
break. But put me in the ocean, and I will. What
am I?
3.You must cut a birthday cake into exactly
eight pieces, but you're only allowed to make
three straight cuts, and you can't move pieces
of the cake as you cut. How can you do it?

5. What is the Meltemi?

12. If you kvetch, what do you do.

Hey Diddle Riddle

1. What common English verb becomes its own
past tense by re-arranging its letters?

5. You want to send a valuable object to a friend
securely. You have a box which can be fitted
with multiple locks, and you have several locks
and their corresponding keys. However, your
friend does not have any keys to your locks,
and if you send a key in an unlocked box, the
key could be copied en route. How can you
send the object securely?

Capricorn – Investment opportunities are presenting themselves to you around every corner, but be careful what you commit to.
Outweigh the risks as well as the benefits.
Lucky sign – A height chart
Aquarius – Recent happenings have forced
you to feel somewhat down in the dumps.
There is something out there that will lift your
spirits but only you can find it.
Lucky sign – Telescope
Pisces – A clever little soul like you should really loon into furthering your education. After all,
knowledge is power and power is pretty darn
cool.
Lucky sign – Power to Books
Aries – Having the gift of the gab can often be
favourable but sometimes not as you can be
viewed as a real pain in the jacksey. Try putting
a sock in it at times (a clean one mind)!
Lucky sign – Mime
Taurus – It’s the time of the year for holidays.
If you can’t beat them join them. Go on become
a tourist for a week or so. Remember the camera…and the sunhat!
Lucky sign – Easyjet
Gemini – There’s lots going on in your vida
right now and you are enjoying the busy spell,
but don’t forget friends and loved ones in the
trail of dust you leave behind or they could end
up resenting you.

Lucky sign – Atishoooo!
Cancer – Holy moses! Seek fashion sense
asap or the fashion police will turn up and scoot
you away for a long long time…
Lucky sign – Zara
Leo – Don’t get bogged down with other people’s problems. It’s ok to lend an ear now and
again, but there are limits so set them and stick
to them!
Lucky sign – Ear muffs
Virgo – The early bird gets the worm. But remember sometimes the worm needs a tug.
Lucky sign – Soil heaps
Libra – Stamping your feet and throwing
tantrums gets you nowhere. Try resolving any
issues with a simple and adult conversation.
Lucky sign – Board table
Scorpio – Keep your goals and visions strong
and stay focused on your mission plan. All will
go your way and you know it.
Lucky sign – Clear path
Sagittarius – You have never fancied being an
astronaut, but sometimes these things and
these challenges have a funny way of presenting themselves.
Lucky sign – Button Moon
And if it’s your Birthday this month....
Stay cool!!

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113

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The Top ten longest words in the Oxford
Dictionary...
1. supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
Wonderful, from song of this title in the film
Mary Poppins (1964)
34 letters

riddle Diddle answers 1. Eat and ate, 2. A wave, 3. Use the first two cuts to cut an 'X' in
the top of the cake. Now you have four pieces. Make the third cut horizontal, which will divide the four pieces into eight.
Think of a two by two by two Rubik's cube. There are four pieces on the top tier, and four more just underneath it. 4. A
shoe, 5. Put the valuable object into the box, secure it with one of your locks, and send the box to your friend. Your friend
should then attach one of his own locks and return it. When you receive it again, remove your lock and send it back. Now
your friend can unlock his own lock and retrieve the object.
Last Monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crossword answers: across: 1. Chaotic, 8. Reorder, 9. Algarve, 10. Evens, 11. Gasholder, 14. Auntie,
15. Usurp, 16. Resume, 20. Proscribe, 23. Dwelt, 24. Impairs, 25. Chateau, 26. Meatier, Down: 1. Change, 2. August,
3. Torso, 4. Creed, 5. Coverup, 6. Advert, 7. Crusoe, 12. Laser, 13. Earns, 15. Umpteen, 16. Reduce, 17. Seesaw,
18. Bikini, 19. Teaser, 21. Odium, 22. Cuppa.

wComputer Problems? Help is at hand. Upgrades, repairs, hardware and software problems solved, NO FIX - NO FEE. Advice on
buying and setting up the right computer for
you. Tuition from complete beginners to advanced, get the most out of your PC. Call David
Fleck on: 952 510 729 / 620 328 382 email:
david@technophobe.es www.technophobe.es

wDressmaker/seamstress, with over 20 years
experience. High quality, reliable service for alterations, soft furnishings and dressmaking.
Call Elaine on 629 610 919. Located Puente
Don Manuel/Periana area. Very reasonable
rates. No job too small.

time Out spas & saunas. Serving The
Costa del Sol for more than 10 Years. Hundreds of Spas Installed! We service all Brands
of Spas so come to us - we are the Professionals. 952 52 43 94 www.timeoutspas.com

Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Real Estate
Sites, English â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices. Call Rachel: 951 708 454 or 691
660 187 Website: www.spanglishwebs.com
Email: info@spanglishwebs.com
sokrak web Design, Quality web design at
the lowest price! Get an eye catching, easy to
navigate website in English, Spanish and
more, to make your business available worldwide. All our prices are affordable and include
hosting and your domain for the first year with
no hidden fees. For more information, visit
www.sokrakwebdesign.com or contact us on
(+34) 666 731 759

This luxurious villa (130m2) with stunning sea & mountain views is
located just behind Algarrobo village, just 10 minutes from the
beach. Large terrace areas and park-like outdoor areas
(6,000m2 plot) give the viewer the feeling of being on a Gallery
within the beautiful mountains. The view from there to the sea is
simply enchanting. Of course, a private swimming pool is also
available. There are 3 beds, 2 baths and an individual guest
apartment available. The impressive living room is effectively
styled by an extra high ceiling and has been designed with
spacious dining area and large windows / patio doors, which even
from the inside the area can enjoy the wonderful views, then
continuously over the adjacent kitchen. The house is partially
furnished, with A/C warm/cold and a stylish fireplace. An alarm
system as well as internet and satellite TV are installed, the water
is supplied by city water and additionally there is a private well.
The very spacious garage and very good access points are more
in favour of this extraordinary property

Sword fish with King Prawns 12.90 €
King Prawns 11.90 €
All dishes are served with salad and fries.
1€ extra -Baked Potato
Pepper, Roquefort or Red-Wine Sauce

VÉLEZ MÁLAGA

FP0825

A villa built of some 125m2 on
6,000m2. It has easy concrete
access from the main road and
enjoys panoramic views to the
Mediterranean. The property has
a telephone line, is alarmed and
has air conditioning throughout.
Outside there is ample parking for
5-6 cars, garage, plunge pool and mature garden. A marvellous property at a
very good price of

225,000€

NERJA - SAN JUAN
DE CAPISTRANO

FP0826

A delightful, 55m2, one bedroom
apartment with a south westerly
aspect in this popular
urbanisation. The apartment has
an open plan living/dining
room/kitchen, one bedroom with
built in wardrobes and bathroom.
The lounge leads out on to
the spacious sun/dining terrace which enjoys views over Nerja to the sea.