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Crazy Quest

When I was a teenager, I was even more shy but covered it up by excelling in formal and natural sciences.

Then with the help of Scientology, the shyness evaporated and after only a couple of years of communication training I became a host of Norway’s second most popular local radio show. Transformation.

With more releasing of mental blocks through Scientology auditing, I worked on becoming more impulsive and skilled at improvising. Where I would next to faint from standing in front of my class in high school, ten years later I thrived in front an audience.

Since then I have perfected improvisation. I have released social tensions and become more free, more unserious, more goofy, out-of-the-box and more crazy.

In the last year I have been focusing on improving my basic abilities rather than any specific skills set (more about this focus in some later blog post). The quest to be really, really free never ends.

The Crazy Quest needs a new level. Time to up the ante. And here I ask for your inspiration. With your help, I may get further out of the box and turn out a batshit crazy wildass. But for a constructive purpose; To inspire others be more free and and lose themselves in a wild abandon.

I too was extremely shy before scientology. So bad it was I would not even answer the phone. That passed fast
The adoring man in my group in a very elegant bar asked me to give up my shoes to be used to drink champagne from, we were not drunk[ it was out first bottle ] just having good time but we were asked to go because the management thought our behaviour was not proper. [ every eye was on us soon as we walked in, it was afternoon coctail hours. I beautiful woman and 4 man]
I dared to marry much younger man than I,[ more than once] also went out while single in-between husbands with very young man much as 18 years and those days that was still taboo. My family called me cradle robber.
I walked on 5th avenue in New York when fully dressed in designer stuff hat, gloves bare foot. The bet was for a $ 1. Those days one not walked barefoot on the street.
Vancouver has many beautiful beaches one of them is the world famous Wreck beach for nude bathing. I have become regular there after OT 7.. those days that to was not normal behaviour.
Conducted tours in my garden most of the time in bikini, and one was not easy because the group contained dozen fire fighters young fireman. My husband was not happy since he was very conservative. Even when come to dressing.
And posting in yours and my blog was not easy at first and hanging out my laundry on the line. Having emails that I am nuts, my behaviour how I think is outrages. Those were in fact validation that I am on the right track. I behave; I have and do whatever I please. No regrets. This is fun.

yes by 6 years, you were just 65? the husbands were 13 years younger. you are too old for me. hehehe.
I also put the body an the shelf in jan.96 and i only take it down for general maintance;lubrication for the joints and gets once a year wash. haha.

here is one, while cleaning houses i wore jewelry but not ordinery small stuff it did not go well with the owners of the house, one fired me for that. you see i did not fallow the rules how the cleaning lady should look like and have.

Traveling cross-country (USA) with my daughters over a Summer long trip, camping in a tent all the way, stopping at one camp-site… and staying 6 weeks, Made good friends from different states and learned different lifestyles and social conditions going on in different parts of the country. It gave fun realistic experience for my daughters.

Seriously I recognize the shyness, oh my how I do !!
Ironically I write this at 4:20 after coming home after playing a very succesful gig with my band.

My way out of shyness has been different from yours, but then also may a different reason behind, that’s a looong story.

My craziest social experiences (yes the plural is intended) are when I meet people that I realize need me, there and then. Sometimes it’s for a pat on the back, sometimes it’s for listening or talking, sometimes there are completely different things, But I do meet these kind of people.

Initially I was confused because didn’t understand why, it just happened. Then for a while thought it was because of some skill I had and so maybe should search out people as well – that didn’t work. Now I just accept it and stand up for them when it happens. I always kind of “know it” just there and then. Sometimes they remain in my social sphere but just as often, they don’t.

Out-of-box stuff both harder and easier. Easier because I feel I’ve done so many out-of-box-choices compared to others’, harder because it’s difficult to pin-point something just now. OK – maybe playing in a band with people 15 yrs is out-of-box enough, I don’t know, But I do it, because it’s fun !
My kids thinks it’s nice that I’m pursuing my dreams … 🙂

I think my general way of inspiring people is that I am usually trying to be sincere.
Another thing though, I was told by my now 22-yrs old daugther, that I’d also been the one to
comfort her when life felt cruel, but once she regained her spirit I told her that “Yes, this is bad/tough/whatever, BUT you CAN handle it”. For her, this has been a way to gain self-confidence an daring things I’d never dared when I was her age. Her feedback really lifted father-heart !

Okay here’s an out-of-the-box one that is out of THE box – the KSW/cult-think box.

It happened in 1996, during the Golden Age of Tech evolution. There was a new Student Hat Checksheet and the first thing on it was to do a 2-hour confront on an HCOB. The requirement to pass it was even stiffer than the 2-hour confront on Pro TRs – and that one was done after the student had studied a good many references, had done a bunch of clay demos and some other actions to prepare for the drill. On the Student Hat checksheet, however, the student was to go straight onto the 2-hr confront after reading just one short bulletin on confront.

Student after student was spending days and weeks, grinding on it and taking a big loss. The Sups in both the public course rooms and the staff course room were divided – some of them felt it was perfectly fine (the more literal ones) but others were sure it was just wrong, based on the many LRH references they knew were being violated. A few Sups then decided to query the RTC Rep for Training. But she was adamant about doing exactly what was stated on the bulletin and on the checksheet – no “Tech Degrades”!

Well, I decided to telex Sr C/S Int and query.him on the matter (even though I knew he was actually junior to any RTC Rep). Apparently, all telexes that went out went via RTC and the Rep for Training saw mine! Next thing I knew I got paid a little visit and it wasn’t a pleasant one. No matter, it was worth every bit of it come a couple days later.

I got my reply from Sr C/S Int and lo and behold he was thanking me for bringing the situation to his attention! He told me that he would be issuing a Snr C/S Int Bulletin shortly, as well as a revised checksheet – and in the meanwhile his telex would serve as an order in writing, specifying the changed requirement (which was one of a much lower gradient).

The Sr C/S Int Bulletin that came out shortly thereafter, had parts of my telex quoted verbatim! I had really made a case for the issue, had given all the relevant LRH references, specifics on the course room horror stories, etc. And – I still had a copy of my telex to prove he had quoted it! That was my claim to fame for quite a good while thereafter. 🙂

Anyway, the best part of the story came later that day of the morning I got my telex answer. I went over to staff college for my study time and the news had spread. When I walked in I got a roaring round of applause and everyone broke out in a chorus of “We are the Champions.” 🙂
.

p.s. It was fun reliving this and extra fun knowing that it is evidence I’m not just another pretty-face, knee-jerking, blind, robotic LRH worshiper and Scientology-cult-think die-hard. :-D)

“Anything you have done that was out-of-the-box? ”
it was I who have disconnected from the church.
Become solo auditor when no one thought of it or dared to do in 76.
With no knowledge or experience i made award winning garden. become master gardener.

“… Then with the help of Scientology, the shyness evaporated …”. so you keep telling.

As a public figure you have a responsibility to the public. People believe without thought what public figures, like yourself, say. It is therefore fair to add that the best, fastest and certainly cheapest way to cure social anxiety is through psychotherapy. See http://www.socialphobia.org/

I have no experience with psychotherapy. I have the experiences I have from my own life. And that is what I can easily vouch for. I have the responsibility to others to speak the truth as I see it, wouldn’t you agree?

Here is an interesting story from 1974 when I was on Apollo. LRH was there too. He was busy documenting the Data Series tech and setting up the Programs Bureau. He wanted the whole crew to be writing “Daily Reports” to him. I wrote to him once in a while. I was a word clearer in the course room at that time.

One day, somebody came excitedly running to me and said, “Vinay, LRH has approved your evaluation as an Aides Order.”

That was a big deal. I was much surprised, “But I didn’t write any evaluation and sent it to him for approval.”

He was confused, “Well, there is something down there in mimeo that says in LRH’s handwriting, ‘This India Program has my approval,’ and he has put A.O. designation on it.”

I was taken aback completely. I ran down to the mimeo and there was my Daily Report that I had sent to LRH just the day before.

Just that month India had sent up a communication satellite into the orbit, and that event had filled my mind with all kind of possibilities. India is a vast country (about the size of the whole Europe, and one-third the size of the United States), but communication by roads is very difficult among the various parts of it. That picture was totally altered by this new development. Now, Scientology could be truly disseminated all over India.

So, I poured all my excitement out in my daily report to LRH. In a way, it followed the format of an evaluation though I had not intended it to be so. There were no labeled sections, such as, POLICY, SITUATION, STATS, DATA, etc. And in that report I presented my “bright idea” that Study Tech should be used to spearhead Scientology in India, and not any slant on religion.

That daily report got published verbatim as Aides Order 263. Next thing I know I was on the Data Series Evaluator’s Course run by Mary Sue. I got trained as a Programs Chief and posted in the newly established Programs Bureau.

I worked on India in my spare time and set up a mission in Patiala (Punjab, India) in 1980 with focus on Study Tech. It was very successful until it got taken over by SMI and turned into something quite unsuccessful.

I am sure that Aides Order (A.O. 263) is still there in the Scientology archives somewhere.

i was not shy before going into Scn and i even “regret” (i don’t regret it really because it’s useless now) being so open at the beginning because that is where i was caught by, but speaking to an audience is something that i don’t feel comfortable doing. something to overcome? maybe. time and circumstances will tell.

i recall that one thing that i did that was out of the box, happened when i had 14 years old and i had already had a few experiences with drugs, and a friend of mine and i, because we were doing a paper work at school about drugs, we decided to speak up in front of everyone and share our experiences. it ended up being very intense and relieving, so emotional coming from deep inside that everyone was amazed and deeply touched by our exposition of thoughs, emotions and experiences. i hope that served as a warning and a good reminder for their future. i think it was.

another thing i remember was that when i was 21 or 22 years old, in one of my life crisis and while living some hard circumstances at home, i left everything and went to a far away continent (my first long distance trip, by myself) and stayed there a whole month to meet personally a friend that i met over the internet. i was a mess and things turned out to be messy too but it was necessary and ended up being good. freeing. i had there the most amazing out of body fast flying dream, among a couple of revealing dreams about some things that were not clear then and became as clear as clean water. it was freeing, again.

inspiring people to let go? i think my tendency to put an end on certain mental and behavioural habits through life that at certain point no longer serve me, end up inspire people questioning their own habits and maybe do the same. who knows. i hope so 😀 i believe my sincere sharing of things, speaking from the heart, has been doing this. fortunately, somehow i think i have been doing this all my life.

i have been leaving who i was yesterday, being born many times through life and i think that ends up touching others, one way or the other. i imagine and i hope but i don’t truly know.

but i continue the cleansing!

happy for you Geir 🙂 and for all of us. i think watching you grow and us all together is such a blessing.
whatever real good we do for us, reaches everyone and everything, even in silence (maybe even more in silence…) i believe, i see it, i know it.

I’ve had the same thought – interestingly crazy how much time and interest you have in this particular motley crew. But I figure it’s just evidence of your awesomeness. 😉

“A motley crew is a cliché for a roughly organized assembly of characters. Typical examples of motley crews are pirates, Western posses, rag-tag mercenary bands or freedom fighters…

“Motley crews are, by definition, non-uniform and undisciplined as a group. They are characterised by containing characters of conflicting personality, varying backgrounds, and, usually to the benefit of the group, a wide array of methods for overcoming adversity. Traditionally, a motley crew who in the course of a story comes into conflict with an organised, uniform group of characters, will prevail…”
(Wikipedia)

Improvisational theater classes with a director that is focused on really getting you and the other participants out of the box, out of your head and into adopting beingnesses one after the other without any introversion whatsoever. Cheer wildly and with great abandon for one another.

Once upon a time there was a band called the Grateful Dead and there were concerts that were extraordinary with wild abandon, dancing and a truly unusual group experience. We called the phenomena “it.” These days Phish fills the bill: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyZnvRwYn7k

In a group of people, pick a word out of the dictionary randomly. Make up a story or poem or song about it. Cheer wildly when the piece is presented.

Get dressed up as clowns or harlequins or something outrageous with a bunch of people and skip around town, play snare drums and generally be ridiculous. You’d be surprised how much fun it is to goof around in an anonymous costume.

On a more serious note, I have been studying a course entitled: “A Course in Miracles,” on the recommendation of a friend who found it to be a most remarkable experience. It is an enormous course, complete with daily exercises, (called the workbook) which are actually processes to be run. It is couched in Christian terminology and concepts, although traditional Churches would declare it heretical in the extreme as it is totally mystical in nature. Even though it uses Christian terminology, it is VERY much out of step with traditional Christianity, especially since it claims that the course was dictated by the ascended master Jesus, who has taken great pains to correct the errors propagated by traditional churches as part of purpose of the works. This includes clearing up many of the traditional terms such as atonement, forgiveness, love, truth, salvation, God, Christ, the holy spirit and many others. The course states point blank that it will result in direct, undeniable experience of your true beingness / state of existence, as an infinite creator, a creature of God and God alone, utterly beyond the confines and madness of the physical universe, with its limited ego traps and language barriers. It has 365 different daily exercises to be done one a day often in as little as a few minutes, very simple, yet the experiences that result and the cognitions and real time states of awareness I have experienced have been mind boggling, completely surprising and often unexpressible. It might not be your cup of tea, it might not do anything for you except offer a radically different viewpoint and truly thought provoking view of the world, but I can tell you that I have found this course to be an adventure that rivals the most amazing releases I ever had in Scientology, augments them and extends them far beyond the confines of the physical universe. I have no opinion about the authenticity of the authorship, and the course itself will tell you that belief is irrelevant, but I can tell you that much of what the course teaches so far aligns with and parallels my own suspicions and observations about the world we find ourselves participating in and for sure, I will never regard the works of Christianity the way I once did. Here is the link: http://courseinmiracles.com/ I should note that I found that I did not actually have to run many of the earlier processes, they blew concepts (big time!) on inspection for me – perhaps due to the earlier work I had done with auditing and with meditation.

Maria, I would say you’ve hit the bull’s-eye for the other categories too – unserious, goofy and out-of-the-box free. Wow wow wow. IMO, there’s no way you could have better deserved what Geir dubbed you – The Maria. 🙂

Maria, I don’t see that as out of the box for a Scientologist. It’s just another Scientology course called “A Course in Miracles” that produces PHENOMONAL EXPERIENCES AND MEANING …

But no real powers.

Try exteriorizing and reading random playing cards all by yourself and see if you can really do it with paper and pencil to record your hits and misses.

And then IF YOU CAN’T …

I suggest you try taking a point of view you COMPLETELY disagree with. One that DESTROYS all hope in spirit. Then be happy anyway!

EXAMPLE: Become a materialist that believes in Universal Darwinism for six months and strive to just be happy meat!

Here’s a chant I made for Universal Darwinism:

“There is no God, there is no hope just Darwin’s hungry emptiness.
There is no God, there is no truth just Darwin’s savage emptiness.
There is not God, there is no self just Darwin’s snarling emptiness.
We’re meat. Just meat. We’re copulating meat.
And meat can do no wrong.
MEAT IS FREE!”

When I started believing Universal Darwinism as fact (something that goes completely against something I felt most of my life), I thought I would become a person with no moral boundaries since “meat is free.” Instead, I found myself being more compassionate and more moral.

Why is that? Funny that. Weird that.

When I do hot yoga at 5:30 AM, I just see myself as sweating meat. When I make decisions I realize my brain already made up its mind and my conscious “decision” was made up in advance by meat …

Good choice, if those were the only two choices. I guess you’ve eliminated the possibility of – believe you are a thetan and be a thetan. No logic or science to that? Here’s a possible counter to consider:

“Scientific logic and mathematical logic have the frailty of trying to find out what is there before one goes there. One cannot ever be if he has to know a datum about the beingness first. If one is afraid to be, one will become, of course, logical. This is no effort to be abusive upon the subject of logic or mathematics…” Scn 8-8008, chapter on “Logic.”

Now, don’t get me wrong. like you and Shakespeare I go along with the idea of – pre-scripted actors on a stage. And even the less appealing –programming, pre-designed. I’m sure there’s a LOT of truth to these ideas. But I noted something you said on your reply to Maria: “When I started believing Universal Darwinism as fact (something that goes completely against something I felt most of my life)…” Could that feeling have been a knowingness?”

The only place I think a Thetan can exist, if at all, is in the realm of number. Here is a rudimentary example. I don’t think we are even close to seeing if it is possible for a being with free will can exist mathematically.

Step 1. Take dreaming meat.
Step 2. Digitize the molecular structure of the dreaming meat. (We can’t do this yet).
Step 3. Save the digitized number that is the value one receives when putting all the 1s and 0s together.
Step 4. Launch the virtual you in a computer, give the virtual you programming tools and let you redesign yourself.
Step 5. Use an advanced 3d printer and print out a copy of your newly designed meat.
Step 6. Play ping pong with your new meat! THE LOSER DIES!
Step 7. Let the new you in the computer update his/her code based on what he/she observes in the meat world and create a new contender.
Step 8. Ping pong to the death again!
Step 9. Make new changes and continue.
Step 9. ETC.

Now WHERE is the thetan? In the computer? In the real world? Or is it the unification of versions of you: FATHERS, SONS and VIRTUAL GHOSTS?

Can Free Will be a mathematical reality? Only if it can be created and demonstrated in a mathematical model can we really KNOW if free will exists.

I don’t know about a mathematical reality but Free Will may be in a quantum physics reality – manifested in, that is.

It would be a very advanced 3-d printer indeed to be able to put LIFE into the print-out. Not to worry though, it’s already been invented! It’s the apparatus of evolution – designed and choreographed and danced by theta (i.e. not designed by monkeys on typewriters, or a “design out of chaos”).

You asked, “Now WHERE is the thetan? In the computer? In the real world? Or is it the unification of versions of you: FATHERS, SONS and VIRTUAL GHOSTS?”

I would say yes, yes, and yes. But this is about as far as I’ll attempt a game of intellectual ping pong with YOU! I’m sure it would be a ton of fun but I’m trying to learn the lesson of keeping to my own league. (Pythagoras who? :-))

And anyway, I’m not sure which level of the Know to Mystery scale we would be playing on – would it be Mystery or Think (figure-figure), or at best Look? Up from that, at the top, is Know – but not that many of us are capable of that level very much of the time. It’s an advanced level on the road to truth. But we’ll get there.

Tell me, doesn’t Buddhism also include a path, beyond the eight-fold, of “Direct Knowing”?

Thanks. That reminds me – what happened with the search bar and archives you used to have? Sometimes you or someone will refer to something on a previous blog post and I want to take a look at it but it’s not so easy to find as before.

Ah, I must not have “refreshed” the screen that many times. I just saw this one and the one I complained about (“Have mercy!”) and the one you had going through the whole “I am not a Scientologist” thread – that was the best.

Hey, it seems like this theme puts the reply box right under the comment you intend, even when that one doesn’t have a reply button and you have to use one on a post above it somewhere. This is a good feature! (More idiot-proof for some of us.)

Lots of unused space, though – if that matters (like if the page getting very long very fast will make that unwieldy, cumbersome stage come faster). Color-wise on this one, hmmm…not so sure about the chamois color. (picky picky) But maybe it’ll grow on me.

p.s. I see the archives are back! 🙂 Don’t forget the search bar too, if and when you can…

Pythagoreans believed whole numbers and ratios defined the universe. THE DISCOVERY OF IRRATIONAL NUMBERS BLEW THEIR WORLD VIEW TO BITS.

And when a guy (Hippasus) told their secrets of irrational numbers to the world, legend has it Pythagoras went all “Fair Game” on him and had him killed.

Some think the old man did it himself. Pythagorus responsible for the foundation of math and geometry. He ALSO was a religious leader and led a crazy, murdering religious cult called the Pythagoreans. They were known for AMAZING mental abilities from taking mathematics so seriously. His name is most aligned with the famous Pythagorean theorem for right triangles.

The Pythagoreans wrote NOTHING down. Everything was passed from Teacher to Student. They were vegans that ate NO BEANS because they believed they were the birth seeds of souls.

They believed that “God is Number” that the core reality (Tao) of all things is at its essence mathematical. They also believed in the transmigration of the Soul (reincarnation) and in multiple universes (or at least multiple earths).

They were accomplished musical theorists and built their lives to align properly with music and number.

And then a rival religious sect wiped them out. And much of what we know about them is lost. THE ONLY RELIGION BASED ON REAL MATHEMATICS WAS OBLITERATED AND NEVER RESURFACED.

He was part of what I call the “Enlightened Lifetime.” Within one lifetime the following people showed up on the world stage: Pythagorus, Lao Tsu, Buddha, Thales (the first “real” scientist), The Founder of Jainism, Sun Tsu, Confucious and more.

It was an interesting 70 years. My blog has an article about it called “Between Two Temples.”

Of all religions that started in that period only one was destroyed utterly and on purpose.

The followers of Pythagoras.

Even though it was a cult, it has some amazing ideas that were spot on, and have never been duplicated in any other religion since.

Kind of like another group I know.

And for that reason, I miss the Pythagoreans DEEPLY. I so wish they survived. Our world really needed their BRILLIANT IDEAS to evolve and reform into various sects and NOT be burned to death in a large building just because they could think light years above their peers mathematically.

We have some hope of some Pythagorean doctrine recovery in “The Plato Code” but it is years away for now.

Kg, you essentially say that the cult of Scn, the Scn Cult, has some amazing ideas. I would adjust that to say: The philosophy of Scn with its amazing ideas ultimately became a cult – but did not do so directly as a result of its core principles. The two are not necessarily intertwined – and that’s the good news!

“Know” and “Not-know” are simply states or statuses. In these states one is not going about “directly knowing” or “directly not-knowing” Both these actions postulate space and when space is there, the most direct knowing is “look to know.”

I think of it the way LRH described somewhere, as a pervading of the space of some “object” and thus know by being (the object), rather than knowing through logic or data (a different kind of knowing). The latter is how I understand the level of Look on the Know to Mystery scale, the level where both science and logic operate.

I got it, that your notion of Looking in KHTK is actually at the level of Know – i.e. being the object, whether a sensation or a consideration. Now that you have me thinking about it, I realize I’ve thought of Look in that way too. It seems I may have had an MU (on LRH’s meaning for Look).

I must introduce on this thread this crazy guy who has been on a crazy quest all his life. His 2005 commencement address at Stanford University is quite inspirational. I truly admire his thinking and his creativity… Steve Jobs, who passed away only yesterday… here he is…

Helping people outperform themselves

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