Wednesday, February 23, 2011

As I was growing mature I always heard people say that their earlier years was excellent When I was in job people said that college was best and they would like to revisit those days. When I was in College people said that school was much better and they would like to return to the school. But whenever I heard them I had a strange emotion because whenever and wherever I was, I got pleasure from it and never had any grudges to revisit my past. The explanation could be that from starting I never got any civilized institution. I was always put into an institution where either the owner was an acquaintance of my father or principle was my father’s buddy. I in point of fact was a subject of numerous experiments for all these schools of magical studies.

I have studied in a school where only 4 members were there in the class but if you think that’s less then I must also reveal that I was also in a school where I was the tallest guy and there were just 50 kids in the entire school, in this very school we were 2 in the class, 6th grade, Ankit Agrawal and Ankita Agrawal !!!. The school which was opened in a house, my father’s acquaintance to world has always given me some out of the ordinary moments in my life.

You must be wondering why am I telling you all this, I am telling you all this because my most awful nightmare has come true, I am back in school !!! And this time without any assistance from my father

Yes, I am in school, I never thought that after leaving Joke factory my life will take a U-turn and will show me the most bizarre and awful days of my life. I left Joke factory and joined Crap Bag, If its tough to memorize the name then just think of a bag full of crap. They focus in all type of crap, you name it and they can produce any kind of crap for you. Crap Bag is nothing but a improved version of Joke Factory, this is what I thought until now but is that right !! I don’t think so.

# The only thing which is common among the two jobs was that they both permitted me to loosen up as soon as I came in. Joke Factory made me sit exclusive of work for 3.5 months and Crap Bag just sought to better that, so they made me sit with no work from Day 1 till today which is roughly 4 months now !!!

# When I was in Joke factory for 5 years, factory was never even bothered what time I come in and what time go back but with crap bag I have just found a prison in my new job. Crap bag wants me to come every day morning at 8 and wants me to sit at leisure till 5 even if I don’t have any work. If I protest; I am spanked !!! In 4 months I have found myself changing, I have changed to a piece of shit now !!

# The greatest thing with Joke factory was that it allowed me to do anything and dress in anything to work because it believed in just joking at the end of the day. Joke Factory just believed in result of my work and nothing else but with Crap Bag I have learnt few original additional things, if you have to spread crap then you should do it with sophistication and with obedience. Now I come to spread crap dressed as a clown and if I object; Crap bag has prearranged professionals to kick my ass.

# Joke Factory believed in Worker’s fitness and constructive frame of mind and for this same motive they by no means restricted anyone to take a break for eating or playing at any point of time but how Crap Bag can can stay behind without being crappy here !!! At Crap Bag you are permissible to do ANYTHING including EATING only after business hours !!! The day is not far when a policy would say that you can take the piss only after 5 pm !!!

# Joke Factory was never short of its jokes, I still remember when I was saying my goodbyes; my boss told me; you are making a huge mistake, hang around with us and we will give you 2% hike, next thing I remembered was, I was rolling on the floor, I nearly laughed to death. Crap Bag also tries to contest the analogous position as of Joke factory, evidently because they are top Rivals but Crap bag constantly end up being crappier rather than funnier. There was this episode of late,

# I was asked to work on a location at far far away kingdom which I turned down, they said OK.

# I was asked to work on the same location at far far away kingdom again the next day and I turned it down again, they said OK.

# I was asked to work on the same location at far far away kingdom yet again the 3rd consecutive day and I turned it down yet again, they said OK.

This went on for quite a while until I stopped receiving their calls !!! I guess Crap Bag hires people from Vodafone and Reliance too and ask them to what they are good at

I think I have seen the world from a new perspective. If now I am given all amenities and free will; I may not be able to handle it. These companies have tested my endurance till its threshold and have helped me become a better and stronger asshole. They created me and they only will have to swallow crap back from me, “Are you game for it ?”.