Marmalade Cat

‘DID you know that you can tell if a baby is going to be famous or not by observing the colour of their skin?

The colour of fame

It’s true. If the little darling’s white, brown, pink or black, they will never succeed.

We know this because the Mail shows us that when it comes to making it big in the celebrity set, the preferred skin colour is orange.

And thanks to a poll conducted by Terry’s Chocolate Orange, we know that the orangiest celebrity of them all is…Cat Deeley.

She is the veritable ‘Marmalade Cat’, who tops the Orange Parade, pipping day-glo Dale Winton to the title of most orange-hued celebrity.

How proud – and orange – she must be to beat such leading neon lights as ‘tangerine-featured’ David Dickinson, orange-peel-faced Jessie Wallace and even the atomic Satsuma that is Judith Chalmers.

But looking down the Top Ten, although we see the likes of Nancy Dell’Olio, Jodie Marsh, Jordan, Terry Venables and, adding an international flavour to the display, Christina Aguilera, there is someone missing.

Where is Robert Kilroy-Silk? How can anyone have missed the glow-in-the-darkie orange man?

Happily, he has not been overlooked, and we learn that Deeley’s prize is to be mated with the great politico and so formulate the next generation of celebrities.

And they will be more talented, more charismatic and more orange than what has ever been seen before…’