My mother shamed me about my registry and now I want to delete it all!! (RANT)

So one of the few things that was supposed to be “fun” about planning this wedding was registry. Since FI and I are planning on purchasing a home next year, we didn’t want anything decorative, just the essentials + gift cards to Home Goods etc. were encouraged.

We registered at BB&Beyond and were led around by a girl who just showed us all kinds of stuff. We decided to just scan it all if we liked it, then weed things out online. I knew a lot of it was a reach, but figured if no one wanted to get it for us, oh well!

So my mom is on our registry and calls me up, just sounding confused and making me feel stupid for the stuff we scanned. Yes, I know the dinnerware was pricey but what I didn’t know is all the accoutrements that were separate were very pricey as well. No one should or would spend $80 on a casserole dish. When we registered for it, it wasn’t in the store she was just showing us pics on a computer screen, no prices. I had no idea how much it was! So after the shaming of the dinnerware, the cooking set and 20 mintues of telling me where I could get all of these things cheaper, I went on to my registry and deleted a good chunk of stuff. Now all that’s on there are cheap nick nacks.

I’m regretting registering at BB&B altogether now. The best part is, my shower invites have already been ordered so I can’t go back on the registry now. *SIGH* *EYEROLL* *SLAM HEAD ON DESK*

Anyone else feel like they just want to get married and forget the wedding entirely?? Because that’s where I’m at right now!!!

Ummm, I registered for that kind of stuff (ie nicer dish wear and serving platters than I would typically buy for myself) and got it all. I would recommend amending your registry to iclude the pieces you want. People will buy what they want. I wouldn’t bat an eye at an $80 gift for a shower.

Put that stuff YOU wanted back on there. Do not give in to your moms intimidation! Just make sure there is a variety of price points. Keep what you really want on there. Even if you get gift cards, BBB gives you a 20% discount after to get the remaining items. Plus there might be a group of people pooling their money together for gifts. You never know. Just because your mom won’t buy it, doesn’t mean others won’t.

I hate judgment being cast on registries. My aunt did the same thing – telling me she wasn’t buying me certain pans, because I could buy them for cheaper from online, vs Macy’s (where I registered for them). If they don’t want to buy you that gift, they won’t! Simple as that. Just make sure to have price ranges of gifts.

As long as you have a range of prices, having some expensive items isn’t a bad thing! Keep your nice dinnerware, matching casseroles, cooking set, etc. and add a few inexpensive useful things – my registry ranged at BB&B ranged from $10 to $400 items and my family is not extravagant. I still got most of it!

I’m usually frugal, but I would spend $80 on a shower or wedding gift easily. I think your mom may be out of touch with current registries.

Go back adn put that stuff back on. And make sure there is a range, so that people who only want to spend $25-$50 have plenty to choose from. FWIW, if I planned to spend in the $100 range, like I just did for one of DH’s friends, I would gladly buy the $80 fine china serving piece. I love fine china and I am going to spend what I am going to spend. It’s no skin off my nose if it is a little piece of china or a bunch of towels. As long as you have plenty of moderately priced things, ignore your mom.

Thanks, ladies. That’s just is, I know things can be cheaper elsewhere but what am I supposed to do, register for a towel at JC Penney, a coffee pot at BB&B, plates from Kohls, a picture fram from Macy’s, just to get the best prices? That’s typically my nature to be honest, but it can’t be done!! I had this adorable, glass drink dispenser that looks like a big mason jar. She says, “I just saw that for $10 less in Home Goods…” GOOD FOR YOU, WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT???

In my opinion, you’ll save yourself a lot of head aches by being mindful about what you put on your registry. Choose items that you actually like and want. Don’t register for things you wouldn’t buy yourself, since you’ll probably have to complete some of the sets (you may recieve half the dinner ware or glass ware that you actually need – will you actually want to purchase the rest?).

Making yoru registry shouldn’t be a super market sweep style scan fest, put a little time into creating a real wish list.

BurlapnLace: I’m with other posters….just make sure you have a range! We just registered this weekend and I keep going back to the list and tweaking and adding things and taking things out in an attempt to have a variety of differently priced things!

Don’t let your mom bother you. The fact of the matter is, some people love to buy nice items that are usable for years to come for newlyweds and others would prefer to buy a less expensive gift. Put items on your registry that you LOVE not useless things that will be thrown out next year. As long as you have a broad range of items from $15 to $300+ I think you will be fine. My registry consists of mostly $50+ items due to the fact that they are the nicer things that my FI and I won’t buy for ourselves but we want/need them. We have owned our house for 5+ years so most registry items are actually practical items that we really could use!!!! My ultimate plan is to keep up with adding some more less expensive things (ie towels, throw pillows, bed pillows, etc) as they are bought so even the late shoppers still have the option for less expensive items.

Those who are attending my bridal shower know me well, and know that I don’t care if they give me their chewed gum off the bottom of their shoe. But I did register for things that are expensive and I have had no complaints as of yet from the items on my registry.

BurlapnLace: if it helps, I’ve totally spent $80 and even more on a casserole dish for my friends’ weddings (Le Creuset for example). I personally have items ranging from $25 to $200+ on my registry so that people only spend what they are comfortable with. I don’t expect anyone to cover their plate or anything like that, but I know some of my friends will want to spend $100+ and some will want to spend under $50 due to varying financial situations.

BurlapnLace: Don’t listen to her. Mom, registrries are for the convenience of everyone. My guests don’t want to have to look at 10 different stores to pick out a gift in their price range. If you are going to keep hasseling me, I am going to stop taking your calls and texts.