stories of growth and of (mis)adventures

Why You Shouldn’t Date a Free Spirit

Have you been pulling your hair out trying to win over someone who seems to be a living, breathing paradox?

If so, you may be in the presence of a free spirit.

These wild, passionate creatures may be the most honest souls you would ever meet but this doesn’t mean they aren’t a handful.

Why you would want to fall for one is as much a mystery as they are, but here are a few signs that you are, in fact, dating one:

1. Always Wandering

Free spirits have a strong case of wanderlust. Their first love is the world and they believe that growth and one’s true self is found when we soak up life – the good and the bad of it.

This means that they usually crave the sun, trees, oceans, foreign lands, mountains, and new adventures. They also have no problems with moving to different cities.

To them, stagnation is death so it may be difficult to convince them to stay put or settle down. They believe that change, no matter how painful, may unhinge them but are actually catalysts for learning about life.

So if you are with a free spirit, make sure you are ready to do some moving around and dates that aren’t limited to netflix and chill.

2. Independent to a fault

Free spirits are sometimes called selfish due to their strong sense of self. Because of their constant wanderings and soul searching, these people know what makes them happy and what doesn’t.

They also know that what would make you happy may differ.

This means that they might not ask you to go with them on their never-ending adventures if you don’t want to, but they may have a hard time giving these plans up for your sake.

If your wants and truth clash with theirs, you may find them going places or doing things without you which could be a tad annoying.

But don’t worry. If you give them the space to bloom on their own, they would no doubt come back to you.

3. Stubborn Passions

Free spirits have fire in their souls that they constantly tend to to make sure it keeps burning. This means that they may sometimes pour their time, resources, and attention more to their pursuits than to spend it with you.

While this also means that once they love you, they truly do with their whole being, it could get tedious to have to share that love with something else.

4. Words as their sword

Free spirits have a way with words because of their strong sense of empathy which stems from having to interact with all sorts of people through their wanderings. They know that people inherently have different truths but are fundamentally alike. Hence, they might be the most eloquent storytellers and best BS detectors you will ever meet.

This means that when you tick them off though, their great command with words may also be used against you and oh, how it will sting. And although they would immediately regret it, you may have to tend to some wounds brought about by their brutal honesty.

5. Random Bouts of Loneliness/ Want of Alone Time

Free spirits love the world but when they are not exploring, there is another world they are at: their rich, colorful inner worlds.

They developed this place themselves but it still needs constant revisiting, just as much as the outer world does. The only problem is, it’s difficult to share their inner world with other people.

Because of this, free spirits are almost always melancholic and would usually ask to be left alone when figuring themselves out. They know that this could be taken the wrong way. Why would they feel lonely when you’re there for them? Why would they want to be alone when they could be with you?

There isn’t a right way to answer these questions. They just “have to”.

These are just a few of the many challenges you will face if you wish to date a free spirit.

If this list doesn’t seem too problematic for you, then congratulations! You are one of the few souls who could handle and tame these beasts- ah I mean, beauts.

This means that they for sure love you as much as a warm day by the ocean and as much as having the last word.