Archives for August 2011

Lots of prep work went into going to BlogHer’11. You have to think about creating a presence, letting people know who you are (if you want people to know who you are). This means things like media cards, business cards, QR codes, swag and and more promotional goodies than you can swing a stick at. (And if that stick happens to be branded with your blog logo, all the better!)

I decided to have some bumper stickers made by Build-a-Sign. Now I don’t expect to see people running around with my blog bumper sticker slapped on their Prius. But I had this idea. See, I’m really paranoid about losing my luggage in a sea of same-looking luggage at the airport. I wait by the baggage carousel, dancing from foot to foot, examining every red bag that comes out of the chute. Sure, sure, we all have luggage tags. But I want to know my luggage is MY luggage as soon as it makes its entrance in the room. (yeah…its my weird travel thing. get over it.)

I slapped some Turnip Farmer bumper stickers all over my luggage! Not only did I weasel my way into the brain of every baggage handler from Philly to San Diego, I was able to pounce on my luggage as soon as it came off the chute onto the carousel. Also, I think my sweet little turnip and bunny made for soft hearts and my luggage went un-pilfered! (Okay, I am sure that would have happened anyway – but you never know!)

So how do my bumper stickers work as actual bumper stickers? Well, let me tell you, the quality is fabulous. The stickers are printed on heavy, waterproof vinyl and the clarity of the printing is superb. I used the same graphics on my stickers as I did for my business cards. My Build-a-Sign stickers turned out better than my fuzzy business cards from Moo! If you know anything about blogger business cards, Moo is the go-to source. But I was very disappointed by their quality. So it was an awesome surprise when my stickers from Build-a-Sign came out so great! The colors were as vibrant and crisp as the colors I saw on my computer screen.

I always get nervous about applying bumper stickers because I am afraid they will either ruin the paint or I’ll be left with papery remnants should I ever want to remove it. The adhesive backing is sticky without being too sticky. Basically it will stay where you stick it but pull right off when you are ready for it to be gone.

I got a chance to try out removing a sticker. Because when my husband discovered that I had put one of my sissy foo-foo stickers on his man-mobile *cough*chevyaveo*cough* he had a fit! He made me take it off. No sticky residue or papery leavings.

So I had to take my awesome sticker off his car. But come hell or high water, he was getting a sticker on his car. And when he went back inside, he got this:

And after he took that one off, he got this one:

Shhhh! Don’t tell!

If he finds that one, the next one is going on the moon roof.

I will definitely be ordering from Build-a-Sign again in the future. How else will I cover the entire man-mobile with blog paraphernalia?

*Disclaimer: Buildasign.com provided me with samples of their product for free in exchange for a review. I received no other compensation and my opinions are my own.

I’m down three pounds this week for a total loss of 52 pounds. And it was not easy getting there either!

Last week was H.E.L.L.I.S.H. I am quite sure that I was a walking test specimen in some germ warfare experiment by the government. I was so sick, just out of the blue. Surely someone snuck into my house and injected me with something. (Oh yeah, not only am I dramatic about nature, I’m dramatic about illness too!.)

Seriously though, I had a wicked level 10 cold. And even though I felt like absolute death, somehow I still wanted to eat my face off…and yours too. Knowing that the 50lb mark was fast approaching, the idea of satiating that hunger with extra snacks was killing me. I didn’t want to go off plan but I am very big on listening to my body. Even though my cold was willing me to zip through the Wendy’s drive through for every meal, I stayed on plan. I was still STARVING though. Like Donner party-esque style starving. So I added an extra Medifast bar to the days when I really couldn’t take the hunger pains anymore. I worried that this would have an adverse effect on my loss this week but it all seems to have worked out in the end. I think my body really needed the extra calories and I feel really good about the choice I made to just have an extra Medifast meal instead of indulging in comfort food.

So 52 pounds is a pretty big deal. Every day that I weigh less than 194lbs is another day that I am at the lowest weight of my entire adult life. Whoa.

I’ve lost one of these:

Yup, that’s 50lbs of burger!

And even though I am super stoked about how fantastic I feel, I’m not going to kid you – something is a little off. When I look at myself in the mirror, I am fascinated by the bones I see sticking out of my back and shoulders. The cheekbones in my face that had long been hidden, the hip bones that stick out when I lay in bed at night. I see this stuff in the mirror and that person sort of looks like me…but I don’t recognize her. This is not a body I am used to and it’s not one that I identify with. So much so that I still believe myself to be much larger than I am. The other day someone told my how tiny I was. Now there’s a first! And instead of being proud of (a very generous) compliment, I found myself politely thanking them, pulling on my already too big shirt and changing the subject. I thought to myself ‘But I’m the ‘big girl’! That’s who I’ve always been.’

I need my brain to catch up with the mirror.

But its hard because pieces of the old me, the big girl, still remain. I’ve been obese my entire life – everything is stretched out. This is especially evident in my arms, the skin is outrageous. I have bat wings and it sucks. Usually I would insert a joke here about meat flaps – or tell you the funny story about how my arm meat made me think I was about to be murdered. But right now I am just bummed out about it.

So badly I want to wear my floppy skin like a badge of honor. Look at what I’ve accomplished! This is the body of someone that has accomplished something huge. But in reality they are the scars of my past. They are the proof of the damage I’ve done to myself and the way I’ve abused my body. It makes me sad that I wasted so much time that my skin is broken. It will not snap back. I broke myskin. My broken skin is proof that you cannot turn back time and some mistakes have no redemption. They are my cruel reminder that every choice I make has a consequence.

Hopefully one day I can get things nipped and tucked but until then, I will learn to live with it and try to use it as a reminder of my accomplishments rather than my downfalls. My bigger challenge I think will be getting used to this new me. Realizing that even though this body is so foreign to me, it does not make me a stranger to myself. Finding a way to merge old me and new me until I am just me. Because in the end, that’s who this body will be – just me – no matter what shape or size it is.

If you’re interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP50 to get $50 off an order of $275.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn’t like something in the program.

I love living in Delaware. I grew up here and I’ve always returned to Delaware after short stints of living in PA. There are constants in DE that I’ve always enjoyed: tax free shopping, superb people watching (oh the variety), people that know how to drive (until you darn out-of-staters get in the mix) and the weather. The weather, no matter how bad, is never really that bad.

Enter the fourth week of August, 2011.

First we got an earthquake on Tuesday. A FREAKING EARTHQUAKE…IN DELAWARE!

I know we’ve had them before but they’ve been so mild that they are generally never felt. I vaguely recall a quake in the summer of 2009. I was at work and heard a loud bang, the building shook and it was over. I work in an industrial area so everyone thought it was a trash truck dropping a dumpster.

We didn’t make that mistake on Tuesday. As the chair I was sitting in rolled away from my desk and I watched large pieces of equipment shimmy and shake, I knew instantly that I should crap my pants and pray to God to absolve all my sins because I was about to die in a horrific natural disaster.

Turns out that the quake was only a 5.8 and caused minimal damage spanning from Virginia to New York. It also turns out the I am a serious drama queen when it comes to forces of nature. I nearly made myself physically ill fretting over whether there would be aftershocks, if there was damage to our house and wondering when the meteor that is surely en route to Earth would arrive and cause a tsunami along Delaware beaches.

::Deep calming breaths::

Just when I started to relax, Irene crept closer and closer. I’m used to tropical storms and hurricanes in Delaware. They are par for the course when you live near major waterways. But this storm seemed especially scary. Maybe I let the hype get to me? On Saturday, before the storm was expected to hit, we decided to get out of the house while we could. We strolled the mall, had some lunch and then headed back home just as the rain was picking up. I felt okay, I was calm and had resigned myself to making due without electricity for a few days. Then, that evening, C and I stood in our mudroom and watched our neighbor’s tree get torn into two pieces by a gust of wind.

Oh. We are so screwed. [See? Total drama queen.]

Then the tornado warnings came for areas the were mere minutes from our house. First it was a watch for 20 minutes, then 30, then it was an hour. I was sweating bullets while the husband kept checking on his Nascar race. Clearly I am dramatic enough for everyone in the house and he need not be concerned with things LIKE EVERYONE DYING.

*ahem* ::regains composure::

In the end there isn’t much of a mess to be cleaned up, we never lost any utilities and aside from being exhausted from freaking out for about 6 straight hours… we are all ok. I wish I could say the same for the folks in lower DE. They’ve got quite a mess to contend with and I’m glad the President wasted no time in making these folks eligible for help from FEMA.

Our biggest issue today will be finding ways to stay entertained. There is a travel ban here and the weather is still pretty iffy – so we wouldn’t go out anyway. We took Iz out for some puddle jumping earlier this morning and she thought that was great fun. Now we are gonna break out the paints and have a craft extravaganza, take a nap and maybe roast some marshmallows over our stockpile of emergency candles.

I think I have finally recovered from BlogHer’11. Again, I would like to that Medifast for choosing to sponsor myself, Jenni and Stephanie. I hope we lived up to your expectations.

So would I go to BlogHer again, with or without a sponsor?

Hell Freaking Yeah I would!

This experience was beyond amazing. It strengthened friendships and built new ones (which is my absolute favorite part of any gathering). And after talking to a variety of people, BlogHer inspired me to focus even more on the health and wellness of my family thus inspiring the possible direction of this blog. (Don’t worry, there will always be embarrassing photos in which I make an ass of myself). Personally, it showed me that while I have come so far on this weight loss journey that I still have many challenges ahead and issues to work on.

Above all else, I had an awesomely exhausting trip to San Diego! Best of all, there are only a few embarrassing photos….and erm…video! (See? I told you there will ALWAYS be embarrassing pics.) So I could tell you about the amazing sessions I went to – but you’ve probably already read the same schpeel on someone else’s blog. I will say that all of the speakers were fantastic and totally brave for getting up in front of all of us. I learned so much from these women and I thank them for having the guts to get up on those panels and grace us with their knowledge.

So rather than repeat a lot of what has already been said on other blogs, instead, here is a crap ton of photos and one really amazing video from Mama Pop.

Today’s post is going to be a quicky. I have some stuff I want to talk about (things like dealing with physical changes) but I’m off from work today and it’s gorgeous outside. So Izzy and I are going to take advantage of this odd day off and cool temps and go on a nice walk in the woods with the bestie, maggie and their dog Cocoa. I’m sure you’ll agree that this is a better plan than me sitting in front of my computer, waxing poetic about losing weight.

I was so hoping that I would hit 50lbs today. It didn’t happen. I place the blame squarely on my girly parts. (For you boys that might be reading, that means bloat and water weight.) So I am down 1.5lbs this week for a total of 49lbs in 25 weeks.

If you’re interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP50 to get $50 off an order of $275.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn’t like something in the program.

My lowest weight in my adult life was 194 pounds – exactly what I weighed on my wedding day.

I am 1.5 pounds lighter than I was the day this photo was taken.

So today, I am officially picking up where I left off before I let myself balloon up to 240 pounds. Since beginning Medifast, I knew I’d be very happy to make it back to my ‘wedding weight’. But I never thought about the feeling I’d get when I surpassed it.

When I stepped on the scale this morning, I knew that somehow today would be different. I closed my eyes, stepped on the scale, gave it a moment to register and looked down.

192.5

I didn’t jump with joy or cry or do a jiggly jig around the bathroom scale. Rather I felt like a Phoenix. I stepped off the scale, and as a satisfied grin slid across my face I mentally scooped up the ashes of my past failures and moved forward with the confidence of knowing that I can meet my goals. I know now that its possible to fail time and again but still find success. I just have to have patience and keep trying. Burn it all down and start again if I have to. I can’t be afraid to try something new. I can’t let others opinions influence my choices – no matter how much I value their thoughts. I can’t let one bad day spiral into two, three days until months and years later I find myself feeling defeated by the challenge before me and regretting the time that I’ve wasted.

If you’re interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP50 to get $50 off an order of $275.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn’t like something in the program.

I have this problem, thanks to Medifast. My clothes are falling off of me. Since money doesn’t grow on trees – and even if it did I’d probably end up killing my money tree – I have to be selective in what I spend my clothing allowance on. I try to make my too big clothes last as long as possible before I buy new stuff.

I’ve also been able to pull a lot of old clothes out of storage because they fit again. A few weeks ago I got a great surprise when I pulled out some shorts and not only did they fit, they were too big!

Quit laughing at my Jorts. I’m trying to save money, damn it!

I hate belts. I don’t own belts. I’m fat. I don’t tuck therefor have no need to show off a cute belt. But this hate for belts obviously causes an issue when losing weight. Since suspenders aren’t really in style right now, I was going to have to suck it up and buy a belt.

Ugh. I hate belts. I hate how bulky they are, how they cut into my flab when I sit down.

It’s slim clasp on the front eliminates the bulk of traditional belt buckles. You can wear fitted shirts over it and no one would ever know you are wearing a belt.

My favorite part about the Invisibelt is that it grows – or in my case – shrinks with you. Instead of the peg and hole design of a traditional belt, the Invisibelt makes a nod at another piece of women’s wear: the bra.

It’s adjustable design allows for a custom fit (perfect if you have a little bloat!).

Would you look at that? You’d never know I was wearing a belt under this paper thin t-shirt!

The Invisibelt comes in four sizes, child, adult (0-14), plus size (16-4x) and if you are expecting a little one, check out the Invisibump! Not quite ready for maternity jeans? Or maybe you are post baby and want back into your regular jeans? The Invisibump will keep up with your ever changing waistline. It also comes in a variety of colors and prints. I love the clear and black because I am simple like that. But I have my eye on the lace versions as well.

You can get 20% your own Invisibelt by using the code “BLOGHER11” at checkout.

Thanks to Medifast for making my pants big and thanks to Invisibelt for keeping them up!

Invisibelt provided their product to me in exchange for a review. All opinions are 100% my own and I was not compensated in any way.

Well, it’s no surprise, considering my indulgences over the weekend that I didn’t lose this week. I broke even and I’m still at 195. Thank goodness for all that walking I did! I did weigh myself yesterday morning and it was not a pretty sight. I am glad that I chose to wait a day for an official weigh in number. The bloat is gone as is some other stuff. 😉

I’m thrilled to have maintained. I had a great time, enjoyed my treats while still making some healthy choices and now I am 100% back on track. Hopefully I can make up for lost time this week and go for a big loss. My knees and hips no longer feel shattered so I am getting back to my ‘wunning’ today. I’m also getting all of my water in.

Today I am looking up OEA meetings to find one in my area and setting up my first chat with the behavioral specialist at Medifast. Because even though I think I made a lot of good decisions while away from home, I am mindful of the bad choices I made. I need to learn how to work through that. It’s 100% possible to lose and be on plan while out of town and I want to figure out how to cope with those challenges.

So that’s that. I’m happy with maintaining in spite of the ridiculous schedule and countless temptations. I’m just going to keep moving forward and work toward better coping skills on the next trip.

If you’re interested in trying Medifast, I have a great deal for you! Use the code TURNIP50 to get $50 off an order of $275.

*FTC Disclosure: Medifast provides their products for my personal use for free. I am not paid or compensated in any other way for mentioning their products. All thoughts written here are mine. I love complaining so I would tell you if I didn’t like something in the program.

The online world I knew pre-BlogHer is a world of backbiting, lies, betrayal, one-upping and ugliness amongst women sprinkled with dashes of caring and support just to be able to say ‘It’s all lies! We aren’t catty bitches! We luuuurve each other! ((hugs))’ **PMs online bestie** Zomg! did you see the stupid thing so-and-so did!

I’m sad to say that I was a part of it for far too long. Its easy to get sucked in and I’ve been on many sides of it. I’ve been supportive, knock-down, drag-out mean, spiteful, made attempts at misguided heroism, I’ve talked smack, I’ve been charitable, I’ve been sweet, helpful and I’ve created monsters in the form of online forums, I’ve been the victim and the victimizer. It’s eat or be eaten in some places on the WWW and I was not about to be gobbled up by anyone. I’ve got a mouth and a keyboard and I wasn’t afraid to use it. I chose my weapon and wielded it callously throughout the internet. And for any good I did along the way, I destroyed it with my carelessness.

And then one day I decided to stop. Because it’s stupid, ridiculous, pointless and a massive waste of energy. And I’m a grown-ass woman that should know better.

It didn’t happen all at once. I will confess (and I know it is no revelation to some) that I can be stubborn and spiteful and once you are on my bad side, there are not a lot of opportunities to get off of it. In short, at times I can act like a bigger child than my three year old can.

I’m not going to make excuses, apologies or beg for forgiveness from anyone. I don’t want it, I don’t need it and honestly I probably don’t deserve it in some cases. I won’t even tell you why, at the time, I felt justified in anything I said or did or how I went from quiet lurker to internet super-beast and back. Instead I’ve just closed that chapter of my life and I’ve moved on. I made a pledge to myself many months ago to act differently and BlogHer’11 solidified that resolve to be myself but to yield my weapons with conscience and care.

When I signed up for BlogHer’11 I worried that it would be more of the same. One internet super-beast after another just waiting for the chance to drag sharpened, freshly manicured talons across a keyboard. What I saw though were thousands of women bragging about each other. Talking about how they admire so-and-so, brainstorming, hugging, encouraging each other to be fearless and brave.

BlogHer showed me that women can be supportive of each other. And that is the kind of woman I want to be. Not sometimes, not half the time but all the time. That doesn’t mean I have to be your BFF…hell, I don’t even have to like you. It means that I need to let you figure out your journey on your own. I don’t need to school you or others on why I think you may or may not be an asshat. I know now that everyone can see it – just like some saw it in me. What it does mean is that if I think you are being a total asshat, then I will just walk away. I’ve never been one to leave blog comments but for the sake of this conversation: I won’t leave blog comments, get on Twitter, Facebook or any public forum and make conversation that is anything outside of constructive or uplifting.

I’ve been doing a lot of that walking in the past year. Some of it forced but most of it on my terms and all of it resulting in relief. I am happy to be free of people, places and things that have long been poison in my life. I’ve eliminated behaviors from my repertoire that lead to more negative behavior and perpetuate this cycle of ugliness. There will always be parts of me that want to whip out my sharp tongue and tell you what’s what. But honestly I’d rather exert that energy somewhere else. I won’t call myself reformed or changed. I will just say I am trying to be the change I’d like to see in others and especially myself and that I am a work in progress.

Thank you, ladies of BlogHer’11 for demonstrating to me what a good place our online world can be. I’m looking forward to watching all of you meet the goals you strive for and hope that I can keep up on whatever capacity I choose in this blogging world.