How to Archer

Hi. I see you're reading the back of my book. This tells me that you either:
A) are hoping to find a brief summary of what to expect from a how-to book by Sterling Archer, the world's greatest secret agent, or B) don't know how books work.

Long Synopsis:

Hi. I see you're reading the back of my book. This tells me that you either:
A) are hoping to find a brief summary of what to expect from a how-to book by Sterling Archer, the world's greatest secret agent, or B) don't know how books work.
If your answer was "A," your best bet is probably the table of
contents, which is where you'll find the "contents" of this book
listed in a convenient, easy-to-read "table" format. So maybe go
check that out for a minute and then come back here. I'll wait. . . .
Pretty cool, right? What other book will teach you how to dress
properly and how to drive an elephant? How to field strip an AK-47
and how to haggle with a Thai prostitute-in her native tongue?
How to pilot an airboat and how to make about a million delicious
cocktails, including a Molotov one? How to kill a guy and how to
prepare a fabulous brunch? Plus how to do tons of other stuff that
I forgot, but that is nonetheless probably in this book (which, to be
honest, I really only kinda skimmed).
So if you want to learn more about how to be more-or at all-like
Sterling Archer, the world's greatest secret agent, quit smearing your
greasy fingerprints all over this book and buy it. For one thing, I really
need the royalties. For another thing, the last time I checked, this
wasn't a damn library.
(Note: If your answer was "B," this probably isn't the book you want to start with.)