Like a mommy blog. Except I'm not a mommy. And it's about extreme DIY and homesteading. And food, food, food. And gardening in fishnets. And moonshine makin'. And the fine mess I've gotten us into this time. So not at all like a mommy blog. Ok, you know what, just read the damn blog.

[UPDATED LINK] Escabeche & Vegan Fermenting, or, I Throw My Hosiery At You Because I Care

Okay, so if this photo is looking familiar to you…congratulations! You don’t have short-term memory loss! The end.

I kid (well, not really about the memory loss thing, so if you got a little self-esteem boost from that, I’m letting you keep it). If this photo looks familiar to you, it’s because I posted it last Friday, for Friday Food Porn.

The Boy eats this stuff with a spoon in front of the TV…you know, ’cause he’s hardcore. I’m almost as hardcore…as I mentioned last week, I occasionally put out a jar of this stuff with a bag of tortilla chips and a blender of margaritas and call it dinner.

“Well, ummmm, sometimes you just need a Tortilla Chip and Margarita dinner. Here is an enabling moment – make some lacto fermented salsa and then you can feel downright righteous about them!”

Kate just gets me, people. Virtual pair of projectile fishnets slingshotted in Kate’s direction. Which is what I do for people I like. I throw my intimate apparel at them. Naturally.

But there was another interesting comment in the mix. Misfit jamaica-momma said:

“looks DIVINE!!!recipe please??? & is there a way to veganize it?”

You know you cute lil’ misfits get anything you want out of me. I CAN’T say no.

Truth is, you don’t need starter culture (whey) at all to make lacto-fermented pickles. You can just add a little extra salt to speed things along, and then let lactic acid fermentation and healthy bacteria take their natural course. It will take longer to pickle your food without the head start, but it works just the same. A second option is using a vegetable starter culture instead of whey. You can buy that here.

So what have we learned here today? The BMG likes to put some spice in your life. Also, I throw my underthings at people. Oh, AS IF you’re surprised.

Toss all ingredients (except whey) together in a large bowl. Allow everything to sit and “sweat” for a few minutes. Now pack the veggies tightly into the jars and pour in 2 Tablespoons of whey per jar. Top up the mixture with filtered water to cover. Now place open Ziploc bags over the jars (open side up), and fill them with enough water to weigh the veggies down and keep them submerged. When you have that right, seal the bags, cover the jars loosely with a towel, and let sit in a dark, room-temperature location. Check the escabeche for sourness and texture daily–the carrots should still be snappy. My escabeche is usually perfect after about 1 week, but your results will differ based on temperature and environment–if you’re not using any whey or starter culture at all, it will take longer. Once it’s perfect, refrigerate the batch to slow fermentation and enjoy! It’ll keep for about a year, and usually longer.

Note: If a little mold develops on top, don’t worry–this is normal. Just skim it off, rinse and replace the bag, and keep fermenting.

Another note: When I want the flexibility of varying heat levels, I put varying amounts of jalapeno slices in each jar. Then I label them accordingly: “Mild,” “Medium,” and “Oh Dear GOD.”

PS My favorite fishnets (when I was a kid) were dark green. And they had a seam in the back. I was just too cool…and BTW I am geting my fermentation gear in order for that batch of hootch you are gonna tell us how to make. Last time I fermented beverages I had root beer all over the kitchen. I had root beer projectiles in my closet. It was wild. It was crazy. But I am going to give it another try!

You’re making cider with us? EXTREME FUN. Even when fermented stuff explodes, I’m secretly delighted. It’s like having a pet that just did something cool and unexpected. Like when our dog ate a Christmas angel and puked glitter.

Oh my gosh you make me laugh….glitter puke. The root beer experience was nuts! First explosion woke us up, located the source. My bottles were blowing up! So, then, I had the great idea of taking the caps off and relieving the pressure. As soon as I cracked the cap, the bottle flew out of my hands, soared around the kitchen spewing root beer in its wake. (The cabinets and walls needed to be cleaned anyway.) Genny, would you believe that I could not locate the renegade bottle? Not until I decided to wash the curtains. It was laying on top of the curatain rod….crazy. wild.

Kate, you’ve warmed my cold, black, little misfit heart! I’m so touched that I’ve been able to corrupt your life with my own brand of crazy. Thanks for your kind words and link…can’t wait to get you into more trouble with homemade hard cider!

That is an excellent question, stino. Originally the product was listed as a dairy-free option–the listing has since been updated to note that the product uses a minute amount of skim milk as a carrier, and that this element disappears with use. I’ll paste what they have to say here:

“There is an element of dairy in this product as a carrier, but the proportion in the final cultured veggies is absolutely minute, around 17 parts per million, which is below trace level.”

So after some research, it turns out some vegans are okay with it and some aren’t, and it’s really a personal choice. But those who are dairy-free for heath reasons or allergy reasons will likely not have an issue with this (of course, discretion is advised and I make no guarantees!). And those who want to avoid a starter culture altogether can totally just use salt and time for lactic acid formation–things will just take a bit longer.