Beyonce's $900 drinking straws

if you want Beyonce to perform at your venue, you better not expect Her Holiness's lips to touch something as plebeian as a plastic straw. The pop diva's alleged tour rider hit the Web in early May and among her divalicious demands for her concert venues were that all bathrooms must have new toilet seats and red toilet paper -- and that alkaline water must be chilled to 21 degrees and served with $900 titanium straws. "Bow Down" indeed.

Lightly perfumed and extremely soft with three layers, the red toilet tissue kind of looks like a roll of streamers you'd use to decorate a little girl's birthday party. Instead, it would be used on poo. When I headed to the bathroom with my new bum paper in tow, did my business, and wiped my nether regions, I felt like I was patting my lady bits and buttonhole with a smooth cotton tee. Also, there were no tissue pieces left behind. I had a clean vadge and bum and basically felt prepared to rule the world. This was toilet paper of the stars.

She can do what she wants with her money, but I hope she has studied the life lessons of MC Hammer, Dionne Warwick, and Toni Braxton. Even Barry Manilow at one point was down to his last $11,000, and I don't think he was ever demanding things like $900 straws.

The Mayo clinic is the only recognized medical authority in the US to make a statement regarding the use of alkaline water. According to Mayo clinic nutritionist Katherine ZeratskySome studies suggests that alkaline water may help slow bone loss, but further investigation is needed to determine if this influences overall bone mineral density and if the benefit is maintained over the long term.
Zeratsky points to the lack of research on alkaline water when it comes to other health claims:Because alkaline water has a higher pH level than does plain tap water, proponents say that it can neutralize acid in your bloodstream, boost your metabolism and help your body absorb nutrients more effectively. Some even say that alkaline water can help prevent disease and slow the aging process. However, researchers haven't verified these claims. (Zeratsky, K)