A Loveless Marriage

I am in a very bad situation, I don’t know if I still love my husband, since we came across so many disappointments during our 25 [years of] marriage. I really don’t know if I still love him, can you tell me if my husband and I can reconcile. I doubt it very much if I’m willing to spend the rest of my life with him. Your advice is highly appreciated. Thank you.

Dear Tracy,

Your marriage certainly hasn’t been the easiest path, and the two of you seem to have grown very far apart. As bad as things are, unless you actively choose to change or end your marriage, things will continue on as they have been.

While it does not look like you and your husband will reconnect passionately, the two of you can come to a place of companionship or friendship. It’s up to you to decide if this is good enough for you. If it is, work toward improving things, and find some joy in knowing that you will have a level of peace and security for the second half of your life.

If you should choose to leave your marriage, do so knowing that you are going to struggle for a while, emotionally and financially. While these are challenges you can certainly manage, and ultimately overcome, it doesn’t seem as if you are quite ready to take that leap.

I wish I could tell you what to do, but all I can tell you is what I see you doing. Even though you are quite unhappy, I see you continuing to remain married to your husband, trying to make the best of it.

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