The Evil Eye Remover

Worldly problems deserve an otherworldly response – for $101.

Nothing was working out that year. My husband had just switched careers at the height of the recession, and we were flat broke. Though my first novel had been published and well received, everything I wrote since then had turned to dust.

One of my children had come down with a rare illness – manageable, curable, yes, but it was serious enough that it felt like a plague, took out our kishkes tending to her. On top of it, everything in the house was breaking. Pipes were bursting right and left, and even the toilet clogged every third time it was flushed. When you can’t even count on your toilet flushing, the world seems black.

I got a call from a friend who said, “This is all about the evil eye.” I imagined her sipping her bancha tea in her apartment as she said this.

Evil eye? Of course I had heard of it. My mother, from Casablanca, Morocco, was on the superstitious side. Her mother, my Grandma Estrella, was even more superstitious. They believed in hidden forces that would take away a new car, job promotions, their good looks and talents, or maybe prevent happy things from coming their way. A random compliment, someone showing off her new baby – all this reflexively brought on mutterings of “Keyn’e hore!” (no evil eye), followed by cries of “A-willee, a-willee!” I turned up my nose at all this – this voodoo.

“I don’t believe in superstitions. It’s not Jewish,” I said to my friend.

“It’s not a superstition,” she replied. “Ayin-hore” – the evil eye – is real. The Talmud mentions it a lot.”

“Yeah,” I thought, “but the Talmud also says it only affects you to the degree you buy into it.” At least that’s what I’d heard from my rabbi. “Come on,” I said. “Something must be going on with you.”

Actually, she’d been having tsoris and her own publishing woes. She admitted she’d recently made contact with an evil eye expert in Jerusalem. “She had mine removed,” my friend blurted.

Like a gallbladder. Like mascara. I shook my head in disbelief. My funky friend had crossed a line.

A few days later, our washing machine broke. We couldn’t afford to get a new one. One more plague, I thought as I schlepped two duffel bags to the laundromat.

More “plagues” occurred. My agent dropped me – gave up on my second novel and sent me the divorce papers.

My bancha tea friend called a few days later with “great news”: A publisher had taken up the memoir that she had been working on for years.

“And this is just after I had a consultation with the ayin-hore lady,” she noted. For good measure, she added, “Just because you can’t see the ayin-hore doesn’t mean it’s not there.”

I scribbled down the ayin-hore lady’s number.

When all else fails, why not try something new?

Why not? Because it was silly, and I swore to myself I would work rationally and hard, not relying on superstitions.

Still, I couldn’t quite bring myself to make the call. This was just the kind of crazy thing my grandmother would’ve suggested. “Go ahead, darling,” she’d say. “Why not?” Why not? Because it was silly, and I swore to myself a long time ago, I would not lead a silly life. I would work rationally and hard, not relying on superstitions. Whether the Talmud said so or not, I associated ayin-hores with all the irrationalities and craziness that fueled my grandparents’ existence: their incessant, childish lovers’ quarrels; their complete investment in talismans and things that didn’t matter – gold bangles, Hamsa necklaces – to make the evil eye avert its gaze, a neurotic attachment to food, including kibbeh, couscous, Moroccan candy cigars, a grilled green pepper salad that took hours to make.

Finally, after a few more months of bad news, I was brought to my knees.

I called the woman furtively, when no one else was home, certain that my husband, a psychoanalyst, would just dismiss the evil eye as an unconscious projection of one’s own evil.

A woman with an Israeli accent picked up the phone: the ayin-hore lady herself. She sounded in her 40s or 50s. In the background I heard kitchen noises, as though she were in the middle of cooking supper. It was 10 a.m. in New Jersey, so it had to be 5 p.m. in Jerusalem.

I introduced myself. “How does this work?” I asked, hinting at the price. “You can send me a check for $101,” she said.

I reeled. That was a lot. This wasn’t just a lark or caper, something I could joke about afterward with friends. It meant that I had bought something or bought into something, a whole ideology. I hesitated. “Well,” I thought. “If that was the going rate for spirits to leave, nowadays….” I took down her address.

Before she started her procedure – blay gisn, it’s called in Yiddish – she asked for my Hebrew name and my mother’s name.

My mother’s name is Rachel. My name was a different story. I had at least four names, actually, given to me at different times by people who inadvertently made a big mess of things. To give you an idea, the first Sabbath after I was born, my father, who was not an observant man at the time, stumbled into a synagogue, of I don’t know which denomination, in Nashville, Tenn., and told the men that he wanted to name his daughter Yishayahu Falk. According to family lore, he was calmly told that this was a man’s name and unsuitable. The synagogue congregants promptly gave a name they thought was suitable, but my father, who was completely unfamiliar with the Hebrew language, could not remember it. And so…. The ayin-hore lady cut through the clutter. “Your name is Ruchama, daughter of Rachel,” she pronounced.

There was a sound of pots and pans clattering. I asked what she was doing. “Heating lead on the stove,” she explained.

I felt a little shock. How medieval. But what did I expect? I was entering Grandma Estrella’s realm now, an overwrought, superstitious world I had sworn I wanted no part of. Okay, but when everything’s falling apart, you sometimes have to reach for the irrational.

I heard men’s voices in the background, people coming in and out, doors slamming, voices calling out friendly rabbinic greetings in Hebrew and Yiddish. There seemed to be a yeshiva in her house, men who had arrived in time for supper. The ayin-hore lady made casual conversation with her visitors and with me. She projected no aura whatsoever. I liked her plain speech.

More pan movements. “What now?” I said.

”You have the biggest ayin-hores against you I ever saw!”

“I’m pouring the melted lead into another pan with cold water,” she replied; then she went quiet. I got the feeling she was praying. Or maybe she was really making supper? Who could really know? Maybe there was a bunch of pots lined up on her counter, each needing its own ayin-hore treatment. Better not mix up the pots, I thought.

She made clucking noises: “Hashem yishmor! (“Heaven forfend!”) You have the biggest ayin-hores against you I ever saw!”

In my gut I felt terror.

Then I rolled my eyes. Come on, an evil eye remover is predisposed to see those little buggers everywhere, just like homeopaths see parasites lurking in everyone’s intestines. To a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

“How can you tell?” I asked.

She responded: “The bubbles in the lead. They’re like eyes.” She stirred some more. “Huge,” she exclaimed.

I nodded – sure, sure. She probably said that to all her customers. Still, I felt scared, and a little proud, too, as if having the largest ayin-hore were something to brag about.

“I’m doing it all over again, until the eyes disappear,” she let me know.

Maybe she should use Shout, I thought.

“They won’t disappear so fast,” she said in a worried voice.

Now I fretted: Why weren’t they going down so fast? Then I shook myself. I was worried, as if this were real, had validity, as if it weren’t sheer nonsense.

Finally, she announced she was done. She talked about my ayin-hore situation. I don’t recall everything she said about me, but she ended with, “There are people who are talking about you, who are jealous of you, begrudge your success.” What success? I thought. “Very, very jealous. They try to pull you down. I have never seen anyone who has so many people giving her an ayin-hore. Oy, oy, so many bubbles in the lead. And so big. But don’t worry,” she said with satisfaction, “I got them all.”

Good, I thought grimly. Stomp them all. Obliterate every last one. Kill the little buggers.

Because who could know what forces were out there in the universe? After all, if germs and bacteria and electrons and protons existed way before anyone discovered their reality, why was it inconceivable that invisible demons – ayin-hores – existed, even if we couldn’t yet prove they were there? I thought of all those imps, dybbuks and demons in Isaac Bashevis Singer’s fiction. I thought of the phrase “Looks can kill.” Well, maybe jealousy can kill, too.

We shmoozed some more, the ayin-hore lady and I, as the world continued to stream through her kitchen. She interrupted me, interrupted herself, totally unfazed by the chaos, the sheer bedlam. The woman was nothing if not haimish. Then she gave me a heartfelt blessing, and we said goodbye.

After I got off the phone, I felt elated, relieved. I wanted to call my mother to tell her everything. I felt closer to her and to my grandmother, as if I had claimed some long-denied part of myself. In fact, I felt better than I had in months.

Just as I was about to write the check, I got distracted. Tomorrow, I’d send it. The next day I wrote the check, but couldn’t find an envelope. The following week, more excuses kept cropping up. At some point it hit me that I didn’t want to pay her. True, I felt better, but I couldn’t believe that a woman busting lead bubbles in a kitchen sink in Jerusalem could’ve brought that about. I couldn’t believe I had succumbed to something so ridiculous. It occurred to me that not paying was a way of hiding from myself what I had consented to – something silly and irrational, something I’d sworn I’d never do. Paying made the episode too real. This way I could pretend it never happened.

But wouldn’t not keeping my word be its own form of ayin-hore? I have been a fool for love many times. Why couldn’t I let myself be a fool for this? Why couldn’t I just let myself be a fool?

And so I confessed to my husband and asked if he could mail the check for me. “Of course,” he said. “Anything to help get rid of the ayin-hore.”

-- P.S.

Since this piece initially came out, people have been asking if the “curse” ever lifted. Well, my husband’s career ripened and prospered, my daughter’s condition improved dramatically, and around then I won close to $13,000 in fellowships and awards for that novel I was working on. In fact, “In the Courtyard of the Kabbalist” has just been released. Oh, and I became the owner of a washing machine.

How much of this was due to the evil eye procedure or just hard work, intense prayers and common sense (living without a washing machine was just plain foolish)? And what about the fact that on the heels of the good tidings came difficult things, too? (I never thought to ask the ayin-hore lady if the procedure had a time warrantee.) I guess it’ll have to endure as a mystery among life’s mysteries.

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About the Author

Ruchama Feuerman lived in Israel for ten years where she studied and taught Torah, and then returned to the U.S. to pursue an MFA in fiction from Brooklyn College. Her latest novel, "In the Courtyard of the Kabbalist," received rave reviews from the Boston Globe, Dallas Morning News, Jerusalem Post and the Wall Street Journal which deemed it the best novel of the year. Her most recent work, a children's book, "Binah Lobell's Super Secret Diary," was just published by Judaica Press. Ruchama lives in New Jersey with her husband and four children and teaches writing, helping people to write books.

I was also extremely skeptical about this procedure of removing the ayin hara. Of course you should check out a person's references if they make claims to have this kind of ability. But in fact this woman has a very real "masoret" (an established source of knowledge handed down throughout the generations). She has the endorsement of several very, very big well-known and well-regarded rabbis, and not just "kabbalistic" rabbis...she has an endorsement from Rabbi Pinchas Scheinberg zt"l, the late rosh yeshiva of Torah Ore in Jerusalem, including a signed letter that anyone can see.

(24)
Jarred,
January 6, 2015 6:17 PM

Ayin Hara

BH the ayin hara comes from Judaism from Yosef Ben Yaakov, who was so beautiful and insightful his own brothers were jealous of him. Also when Bilam who had a strong evil eye tried to curse Israel. The ayin hara is true and can be devastating. Always my buleBuste ema and grandma and aunt have said: against ayin hara the only solution is Psalms, Tzadaka, light a candle and for a woman a mikveh, for a man a put on Tefellin. If you want to keep the ayin hara away forever, go to schul, join a Torah study, volunteer more in your community. The ayin hara can't touch some one who puts H" and His Torah first in their life. The avoda zarah comes when we get so involved in the mundane far away from H". We have false gods, H" is jealous, He allows the ayin hara against us until we get back to Him. Or so my family deals with the non-existent ayin hara.

(23)
Leah,
November 26, 2014 11:34 PM

If someone gives a person an Ayin Hora surely it is in Hashem's

Power to have it removed. To have to pay $101 (the fee has probably increased by now) is outrageous. There are guidelines how to protect oneself from this "affliction." The Torah states, "You shall be perfectly faithful to Hashem your God"(Devarim 18:13). Doesn't that infer we must rely only on Hashem. If a person is going through difficulties shouldn't their first port of call be to God?

(22)
Bina,
November 26, 2014 3:10 PM

LOL

This is as LOL as it gets. The woman who fell for this is a downright fool. The woman who has this business sounds like a savy business woman. Ain't nothing wrong with making money off of the foolish and stupid! Ha!

(21)
Leah,
March 4, 2014 7:30 AM

biased

This article is totally biased. The author should have said the other side of the story, and hakaras Hatov (gratititude) should have made her say it in a more positive light. Even if she doesn't believe in it, she didn't have to belittle it and be so negative. She should have mentioned that this lady has haskamos.

Yonatan,
November 26, 2014 11:56 PM

Avoda Zara

I cannot think of any reason why an obvious act of Avoda Zara should not be belittled, if anything, there is an obligation to belittle it.

Also, there should be no hakaras hatov when one is misled into doing Avoda Zara.

(20)
Yonah Berwaldt,
December 29, 2013 1:13 AM

The Evil Eye is Not Part of Jewish Thought, Nor is it Rational

The evil eye, as commonly misinterpreted, is not a part of Jewish thought. As far as taking a rational approach to one's life: First, the writer should acquaint herself with the scientific method, including the necessity for attempting to disprove a hypothesis. A double blind study investigating the so-called Evil Eye would be an interesting experiment. Donating $101 to a non-profit organization to investigate the reality or fiction of the evil eye would be more worthwhile then sending it to a which doctor dressed in Jewish clothing. Third, it would be beneficial for her to look into the field of heuristics and biases. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cognitive_biases In particular, she should consider how "confirmation bias" and "illusory correlation" have colored her perception of the events within her life.

As for the one sentence true definition of the "evil eye," it is that repressed negative feelings people harbor about someone do get expressed in sublimated ways. An example is not doing business with or thinking negatively of someone toward whom you harbor suppressed resentment. That resentment can derive from the belief that they are "more successful than they should be" or "have many and/or wonderful children" or any other number of things that induce jealousy. The sublimated form is the justification that your choice to not associate, do business with, help out, or whatnot, the person or feel negatively toward the person is based on something real that has actual merit. In reality, it is one's own jealousy. This is the "evil eye" as discussed in the Talmud, not the pagan notions of mystical forces.

May the true light of Judaism and rationality reach more people, especially the ability to learn how to think critically, as exemplified by the scientific method and Brisker Derech. May this usher in the Redemption. Amen.

Anonymous,
November 26, 2014 3:47 PM

Interesting Comment

I loved your comment and was wondering who would articulate these ideas until the part about the Brisker Derech when I realized you were from YBT...LOL!

(19)
osher avraham,
October 6, 2013 4:32 PM

what a load of garbage

make your own luck...

Anonymous,
November 6, 2013 9:40 PM

Israel Maal ha Mazal Israel is above Luck

Jews don't have LUCK honey, we have Hashem.this woman is my daughter's mother in law. She's the real thing and she has plenty of experience to do this.

Amy Tarshis,
January 26, 2014 5:39 AM

Really?

Practice Achavat Hinam!

(18)
Anonymous,
October 5, 2013 11:39 PM

The Evil eye remover

The evil eye is mentioned in the Jewish Siddur(prayer book), in the morning blessings. "May it be you will......protect me this day....from an evil occurrence; from an evil eye, ...." the person who says the blessing asks G_d to protect him/her from an evil eye. so there must be some belief about it , and those who recite the Siddur are already covered ! Or so we hope.

Tomas,
October 8, 2013 4:59 PM

Thanks!

I want to thank you for pointing out this fact. I am a Noahide and know that there exists a Siddur prayer book, but I don't know its contents.I have experienced some very painful things in my own life. I don't know why they happened, but I have decided to order this prayer book from Amazon, based on your information.

(17)
Bracha Goetz,
October 3, 2013 9:06 PM

Wonderful!

(16)
Jane,
October 3, 2013 5:06 PM

It must have lifted

Both you and your husband have articles on Aish.com in the same week!!! Hashem should continue you bless you and your family bli ayin hara for many years. For those who enjoy Ruchama's writing try her new novel....

(15)
Anonymous,
October 1, 2013 12:41 AM

They are just money making scams that plant an air of suspicious in the hearts of our fellow brothers and sisters. I know 2 people who went to such a person and both of them became suspicious of friends and family around them and became some how paranoid for a while (one of them has not recovered yet!Sorry, But I am very disappointed.

(14)
Lisa Beltz Jessel,
September 30, 2013 2:05 PM

It is a respected Mesorah.

I have been to the "Ayin Hara" and seen her do this three times with people. I can assure you she was doing exactly as she said she was (not making dinner) and was not feeding you a line about yours being big! Each time she interpreted the ayin haras differently, and never tried to scare us into thinking how big ours were! In fact she spent hours with us offering us different prayers, sets of psalms and places to daven to help strengthen us and bring about a yehoshua. She is a very dedicated, sincere, pious woman, doing this to help people. She has the approval of many of the Torah Giants of today. I only wonder that she didn't encourage you to look in your life to see what was drawing the ayin haras to you. I have heard she has helped others figure out who they need to reconcile with to stop the ayin hara.

Elnorah,
October 20, 2013 2:09 PM

I'm suffering from many terrible problem in my life and I know thats the same issue.but I didnt know what I do till I read this article. That's for along time I'm looking for someone to do the same things for me and I never found. I wanted to ask kindly if there is any chance to find this lady contact informatiom. Ofcourse my first hope is hashem. But I really am done. im so tired and deppresed and no more hope. May this is last luck for me to save my life.

(13)
Rina Tziona,
September 30, 2013 12:59 PM

@Broom and "Superstition"

It never fails to astound me that a religion and people based on spiritiuality don't believe in spirits. Yes, there is a spirit world, and it is affected, among other things, by people's thoughts, words, and deeds, including people who have bad intentions for you. This can show up in the form of a curse, like the ayin ha-ra. There are people who cast curses for a living, and I have to tell you that they work. So does lifting the curse. Call it what you want, but pragmatically speaking if it works then you need to consider exactly why it works. Burying your head in the sand doesn't negate the fact that there is more to this world than science can currently prove.

BROOM,
October 10, 2013 5:56 AM

RESPONSE TO RINA TZIONA

You've got to be kidding. This is the 21st century. Stop believing in fantasy and magic. You sound delusional.

(12)
Anonymous,
September 30, 2013 12:53 PM

Good article

(11)
Yaakov Branfman,
September 30, 2013 8:24 AM

P.S. to: I know who this has to be

As long as I gave Mrs. Miller's number, then people living in Yerushalyim should also have easy access to it without have to call chul. From here, she can be reached at: 052-763-5533 or02-5400-716.

Anonymous,
September 30, 2013 5:02 PM

are you sure?

You wrote "I know who this has to be", which means, you are not 100% sure.
I really would like to know if I call the right person. Thank you Mr. Branfman
Please, Mrs. Feuerman, could you please give us her phone number?

(10)
Anonymous,
September 30, 2013 8:13 AM

Belief in the Evil Eye!!!

The Lubavitcher Rebbe said that there is such a thing as the ''evil eye'' (ayin hore) but that a person should not base his or her whole life on the fear of ''ayin hore''. Therefore, the Rebbe was against going to these type of people who ''remove'' the ''evil eye''. The Rebbe also said that instead of saying ''Bli Ayin Hore'' one should say ''Baruch Hashem''. When a person gives thanks to Hashem, that in itself removes the ''ayin hore''.

(9)
Yvette Alt Miller,
September 30, 2013 2:28 AM

Amusing - and thought-provoking

Having loved your novel "Seven Blessings", I'm sure that much of your success is due to your amazing writing style and gift with telling a story - both of which are on display in this article! Thanks for this.

It is very easy to be spiritually seduced. We do well, as you suggest Michael, to keep to the truth of Torah and anchor our hopes for protection and guidance in Ha Shem.

(7)
BROOM,
September 30, 2013 1:51 AM

SUPERSTITION

Superstition is ultimately a damaging and self-defeating philosophy. Belief in magic and fantasy, by definition, interferes with a person's understanding of reality, and therefore is destined to cause harm. Belief in the "evil eye" is a result of the ignorance of primitive people from many centuries ago trying to explain or understand the random vicissitudes of life which often go against our best hopes. It would be good for the author of this article to understand that these superstitious beliefs are inevitably harmful, and virtually never helpful or positive. No one can allay or prevent negative occurrences in life. They happen at a certain rate, whether you "poo-poo-poo" or throw salt over your shoulder or pray or whatever. Those things have no effect at all, because there is no evil force or intelligence behind the unfortunate occurrences in life. They are simply part of the natural course of life, the good and the bad.

Sharon,
September 30, 2013 1:33 PM

everything is just random, huh?

It's one thing to discount ayin hara and quite another to declare that everything that happens to us is happenstance, and that prayer (and doing tshuva -repentance) has no effect on the events of our lives. That G-d is actively involved in our lives is a basic tenent of faith. You may choose to disbelieve both, but don't package them together please.

(6)
Anonymous,
September 30, 2013 12:11 AM

who is this person:????

after reading this article and realizing that exactly the same things are happening to us, my husband and I thought an ayin hara could be happening to us as well. Would it be possible for Mrs. Feuerman to reveal the name of the person who did this for her and her phone number?Or, could you send it privately to me at the above e mail address?Thank you

(5)
Anonymous,
September 29, 2013 9:37 PM

Can I have the phone number?

I am like you skeptical about this but why not? Could you send me this woman's information? Things have been happening in my family's lives which make no sense. I feel like someone gave us an Eyin Harah, I would like to contact this woman. thanks.

(4)
Yaakov Branfman,
September 29, 2013 8:25 PM

I know who this has to be!

I knew this had to be Mrs. Aidel Miller of Yerushalyim. I asked her and she verified it. She should be known about because she has a lot of stories of people helped, like Ruchama's story, and even with more serious cases. Her abilities are special, and her personality is also.My experience is that she looks at the person, not just the lead. If it helps to know that she has haskamas and brochas, then it's good to add that she has them from Rav Chaim Pinchas Sheinberg, ztzal; Rav Dovid Abuchatzera; Rav Gamliel Rabinovitz; Rav Aderet of Great Neck, and others. A resource like this should be accessible, so her phone number is accessible: 718-689-1902. (Rings in Yerushalyim). (I receive nothing from this, except the satisfaction of knowing that people will be, bs"d, helped.)

yael,
October 4, 2013 3:41 AM

Thank you so much. You have no idea how many people you have probably helped right now!

(3)
Anonymous,
September 29, 2013 7:53 PM

I can relate.

Well.... I have to ask. How do I get in touch with the Ayin Hore lady??? (I live in Jerusalem too)

(2)
Anonymous,
September 29, 2013 6:55 PM

We may have gone to the same lady in Jerusalem...

Thank you for your article. I think I may have gone to the same ayin hara lady in Jerusalem. She said the same thing-that I had so many ayin haras and that it may take a while to get rid of all of them. I was relieved when she removed the evil eye, but then wondered what it all really meant, as well as what's the time warrantee. I think it bothered me that one appt. with this lady can make all my problems disappear. Maybe the misfortunes that I had experienced were just G-d's way of reminding me to be more modest, to pray more, etc? It is quite scary to think that people can have so much control over your life due to your good fortune that they happen to be jealous of...

(1)
Yehudit,
September 29, 2013 6:47 PM

Please I need the number of the lady.....

This article is a refreshing note from AISH!!! who would have thought.... You may save a life with this one. Please can I have the number of the lady in Jerusalem, my father-in-law's life may depend on it. The last six years, just at the point when he was at the top of his profession, have been a medical nightmare, from barely surviving a sudden brain aneurism to needing a kidney transplant, to catching a debilitating lung virus after the transplant which could result in needing a lung transplant.....G-d forbid!!! And there are many who could be giving him the Ayin Hara. Thanking you in advance. You have given us a new lead.....

I'm told that it's a mitzvah to become intoxicated on Purim. This puzzles me, because to my understanding, it is not considered a good thing to become intoxicated, period.

One of the characteristics of the at-risk youth is their use of drugs, including alcohol. In my experience, getting drunk doesn't reveal secrets. It makes people act stupid and irresponsible, doing things they would never do if they were sober. Also, I know a lot about the horrible health effects of abusing alcohol, because I work at a research center that focuses on addiction and substance abuse.

Also, I am an alcoholic, which means that if I drink, very bad things happen. I have not had a drink in 22 years, and I have no intention of starting now. Surely there must be instances where a person is excused from the obligation to drink. I don't see how Judaism could ever promote the idea of getting drunk. It just doesn't seem right.

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Putting aside for a moment all the spiritual and philosophical reasons for getting drunk on Purim, this remains an issue of common sense. Of course, teenagers should be warned of the dangers of acute alcohol ingestion. Of course, nobody should drink and drive. Of course, nobody should become so drunk to the point of negligence in performing mitzvot. And of course, a recovering alcoholic should not partake of alcohol on Purim.

Indeed, the Code of Jewish Law explicitly says that if one suspects the drinking may affect him negatively, then he should NOT drink.

Getting drunk on Purim is actually one of the most difficult mitzvot to do correctly. A person should only drink if it will lead to positive spiritual results - e.g. under the loosening affect of the alcohol, greater awareness will surface of the love for God and Torah found deep in the heart. (Perhaps if we were on a higher spiritual level, we wouldn't need to get drunk!)

Yet the Talmud still speaks of an obligation on Purim of "not knowing the difference between Blessed is Mordechai and Cursed is Haman." How then should a person who doesn't drink get the point of “not knowing”? Simple - just go to sleep! (Rama - OC 695:2)

All this applies to individuals. But the question remains - does drinking on Purim adversely affect the collective social health of the Jewish community?

The aversion to alcoholism is engrained into Jewish consciousness from a number of Biblical and Talmudic sources. There are the rebuking words of prophets - Isaiah 28:1, Hosea 3:1 with Rashi, and Amos 6:6, and the Zohar says that "The wicked stray after wine" (Midrash Ne'alam Parshat Vayera).

It is well known that the rate of alcoholism among Jews has historically been very low. Numerous medical, psychological and sociological studies have confirmed this. The connection between Judaism and sobriety is so evident, that the following conversation is reported by Lawrence Kelemen in "Permission to Receive":

When Dr. Mark Keller, editor of the Quarterly Journal of Studies on Alcohol, commented that "practically all Jews do drink, and yet all the world knows that Jews hardly ever become alcoholics," his colleague, Dr. Howard Haggard, director of Yale's Laboratory of Applied Physiology, jokingly proposed converting alcoholics to the Jewish religion in order to immerse them in a culture with healthy attitudes toward drinking!

Perhaps we could suggest that it is precisely because of the use of alcohol in traditional ceremonies (Kiddush, Bris, Purim, etc.), that Jews experience such low rates of alcoholism. This ceremonial usage may actually act like an inoculation - i.e. injecting a safe amount that keeps the disease away.

Of course, as we said earlier, all this needs to be monitored with good common sense. Yet in my personal experience - having been in the company of Torah scholars who were totally drunk on Purim - they acted with extreme gentleness and joy. Amid the Jewish songs and beautiful words of Torah, every year the event is, for me, very special.

Adar 12 marks the dedication of Herod's renovations on the second Holy Temple in Jerusalem in 11 BCE. Herod was king of Judea in the first century BCE who constructed grand projects like the fortresses at Masada and Herodium, the city of Caesarea, and fortifications around the old city of Jerusalem. The most ambitious of Herod's projects was the re-building of the Temple, which was in disrepair after standing over 300 years. Herod's renovations included a huge man-made platform that remains today the largest man-made platform in the world. It took 10,000 men 10 years just to build the retaining walls around the Temple Mount; the Western Wall that we know today is part of that retaining wall. The Temple itself was a phenomenal site, covered in gold and marble. As the Talmud says, "He who has not seen Herod's building, has never in his life seen a truly grand building."

Some people gauge the value of themselves by what they own. But in reality, the entire concept of ownership of possessions is based on an illusion. When you obtain a material object, it does not become part of you. Ownership is merely your right to use specific objects whenever you wish.

How unfortunate is the person who has an ambition to cleave to something impossible to cleave to! Such a person will not obtain what he desires and will experience suffering.

Fortunate is the person whose ambition it is to acquire personal growth that is independent of external factors. Such a person will lead a happy and rewarding life.

With exercising patience you could have saved yourself 400 zuzim (Berachos 20a).

This Talmudic proverb arose from a case where someone was fined 400 zuzim because he acted in undue haste and insulted some one.

I was once pulling into a parking lot. Since I was a bit late for an important appointment, I was terribly annoyed that the lead car in the procession was creeping at a snail's pace. The driver immediately in front of me was showing his impatience by sounding his horn. In my aggravation, I wanted to join him, but I saw no real purpose in adding to the cacophony.

When the lead driver finally pulled into a parking space, I saw a wheelchair symbol on his rear license plate. He was handicapped and was obviously in need of the nearest parking space. I felt bad that I had harbored such hostile feelings about him, but was gratified that I had not sounded my horn, because then I would really have felt guilty for my lack of consideration.

This incident has helped me to delay my reactions to other frustrating situations until I have more time to evaluate all the circumstances. My motives do not stem from lofty principles, but from my desire to avoid having to feel guilt and remorse for having been foolish or inconsiderate.

Today I shall...

try to withhold impulsive reaction, bearing in mind that a hasty act performed without full knowledge of all the circumstances may cause me much distress.

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