Being a nomad

I’m a nomad. Deeply. With every fibre. I can’t stay longer than a few weeks without feeling trapped and stucked. It depends always on where I am – but til now I had these ‘nomad’ feelings quite early. I lovingly call it my beating nomad heart when it’s time to move on again. It doesn’t matter if I found a great job or lovely friends in that place – when my nomad heart starts beating and I’m not leaving straight away I’m slowly feeling sad and downhearted. I’m just thinking about the next roadtrip and the next adventures.

I’m constantly peripatetic. Since years. But that’s me and it’s ok. I can handle my unsteady feelings much better since I left Germany. I enjoy the restlessness and being an adventurer. Not to know where to go next or not to know what will happen on the next journey is thrilling. Living this life changed me already in so many ways, I feel better, riper, more relaxed but principally confident. I learned to survive alone in a foreign country. That’s great! To travel alone is an experience everyone should make. Nothing seems to be impossible or too hard anymore. Once you have felt this freedom and experienced what it’s like to just be overwhelmed from the sheer beauty of nature – you’re not the same anymore.

I’m trying to find the right words to let you feel what I felt but wow.. That’s hard. The world seems to be tiny and you can go whereever and do whatever you want. Imagine a flower that opens with the first sunbeams. Imagine a beautiful spring morning, when the hoarfrost disappears and the nature awakes. To live a completely different life than the society expects of you is like that. I suppose. Everyone is individual and experience everything different. But that’s how I feel. I was lost in Germany. I never fit in there. I was never happy and content. There was something missing and I couldn’t name it. Then I left and I knew what was wrong. My heart belongs in the world and had to be free.

To be a nomad made me stronger. I lost fears, became so much more confident, independet and I might say a bit smarter 😉 😀

What I love most about my travels are the roadtrips. To be reduced to the basics. Being somewhere without reception and other luxury items is the best I’ve ever experienced. There is just you and the nature. The beautiful mother nature. Sitting on the ground next to my car, my home, in the evening when it’s already dark under the stars is just .. breathtaking. It feels like you can touch the milkyway. When I saw my first falling star my heart stopped for a second. To be surrounded by nothing and concentrated on my heartbeat and breath tickled out my deepest thoughts and forced me to face myself. Daunting at the beginning but an important step to get to know yourself. And believe me – you need that to endure your own company. Travel alone with pretending to be someone else is self-destruction.

I’ve met so many awesome people. Friends for life – where I know that there will be a connection forever. We never said goodbye. Just ‘See you somewhere in the world’. And we will. I’m struggeling with finding the right words to describe how I feel about you all. To got to know you gave me so much and I always lovingly remember all our conversations and adventures. The good and the bad ones. Even when it came to a discussion or a little fight 😀 I love you! I’ve grown a bit more with every person I met. Thank you for being in my life.

You’re lovely. You’re good. You’re great!

How a good friend used to say:‘Everyone is uniquely beautiful in their own special way.’

I had to learn that. I was so unconfident when I started my journey. Yes, I was brave to quit my past life and to make this step – but in the inside I was anxious and nervous. I was most of all scared to be faced with myself. But – I got through it. I’m never gonna regret my decision. It was the best I’ve ever made.

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2 Thoughts

So i actually met you in the desert cafe a few weeks ago and fell in love with your accent! Then your facebook popped up on my newsfeed and i couldnt believe it, have read your blog and im bloody impressed!