The random musings of a fashion addict about life and love, the positive and the negative.

Month: August 2014

I’m actually not entirely sure how this styling got thrown together. So if it makes no sense… I apologize. I, however, happen to like it. LOL.

The top is mine… and is a sort of preview of my gacha item for the upcoming Rock Your Rack in September, put on by Models Giving Back. I fully admit I haven’t loaded my vendors yet and looked around at the website to re-familiarize myself with the minimum numbers, but I can assure you that a very significant portion of every sale will be going to the National Breast Cancer Foundation.

For those that don’t know or didn’t hear, I launched my own little clothing store at Fashion For Life this year, called [Alexithymia]. I launched a single gown, the Fatale Gown, which has since been moved to Marketplace, with the exception of the Exclusive colors. Trinity Blue was retired, and Relay Purple only comes out at Relay events. Hence “exclusive”. It never made sense to me how events ask for exclusives but then let you take the item back to your store after the event… I mean, as a consumer, if I don’t want to screw around with the event, I’ll just wait until the item shows up in the store. This should especially be a concern for fundraising events… at the event, at least a portion of each sale goes to whatever charity… but in the store? There is no guarantee that percentage will be kept. And then who loses out? The people affected by the charity.

For that reason, I don’t like to take my exclusives (or exclusive recolors) back to my store. Get them at the event, support the cause I’m supporting, or don’t get them at all.

That said, I may have to make an exception to my own rule… cause I’m kinda in love with one of the dresses I’m releasing at Rock Your Rack, even as simple as it is… and I hope you’ll fall in love with it too. I might have to bring that one back to the store after the event.

I started blogging a year and a half ago. I had a little blog on Blogger and I did my thing. Shortly after I started, it was recommended to me to use WordPress instead of Blogger… so I switched over and loved it. The only thing I didn’t like was it took me FOREVER to figure out how to hyperlink my SLURLs for credits. But after I figured that out, I was golden. I loved it a lot more than Blogger.

6 months later, I decided, what the hell, and upgraded to Premium for WordPress. This got me a domain, which is why my blog changed from pageantconfessions.wordpress.com to tivispiritor.com. It also allowed me to use custom colors to edit themes, which was pretty useful. There were apparently other features and advantages… however, I either didn’t use them, or I found them useless. $99 for a domain and some colors for a year. As the year approached an end, I weighed it out… was it worth the $99? Not really. The domain certainly doesn’t cost that much… and if I really wasn’t happy with the colors of a particular theme, I suppose I could find another theme.

So I decided to let my domain and Premium expire, figuring I would simply lose the Premium features and the domain, and that my blog would default back to pageantconfessions.wordpress.com… since that was the original domain that I had, and the domain from which my dashboard ran. It’s not like that domain just ceased to exist.

But apparently it’s not that simple.

The day after my Premium features and tivispiritor.com expired, I typed in my old address and got the same pop-up “Your domain has expired!” pop-ups that I had gotten from the expired domain address. I’m thinking… that’s not right… cause my other domain is free and doesn’t expire. It should’ve defaulted back. The pop-up gives me the option to cancel the tivispiritor.com domain, so I go through that process to see if maybe I have to cancel in order for it to default back like it should.

My cancellation is denied. For real?

Turns out, I get an email later saying that the cancellation was denied because my reasoning for cancelling the domain was because I didn’t want Premium anymore, and I could keep the domain without the features for only $26, blah blah blah more attempts to get money from me. I sent an email back saying that if I wasn’t sure I wanted to cancel the domain, I wouldn’t have gone through the cancellation process.

By this time, I’m so fed up that I go through GoDaddy, which Wylder used to use… and I decide to do the same thing I’d done with the Blog For a Cure charity feed… use Managed WordPress hosting through the WordPress.Org platform and use my own domain. This cost $12 for a year and runs very very similarly to what I’m used to.

So… I apologize for the confusion with the new URL. I’m trying to update it with stores I blog for and feeds I’m on and the whole thing is just a nightmare and a half. But thanks for bearing with me. 🙂

Poses: various from Morphine* Hadaluna advertised yesterday that she was closing within the next few hours, though I went back several times last night and was able to still buy poses. I’m linking you to the last known location I got poses from. If it’s gone already, then I’m sorry.

Just tell me what to doI’ll fall right into YouGoing under, cast a spell, just say the word…

Clearly I’m defective.
Or something similar.

I sorta touched on this feeling in the last entry I posted… but I guess I’m touching on it again because I still feel that way. I’m not one of those people that goes into several situations and wonders why they don’t work out… all the time… repeatedly. I don’t pretend to be completely blameless. In fact… I’m the one that goes into those multiple situations, watches them all fall apart, and then turns around and wonders what the hell is wrong with me.

This is what I find myself doing now.

It seems that no matter how well I do or don’t know the people involved… every time I enter into a House, in any sort of capacity… that House falls apart.

The fucked up part? She’s the one that has shown a complete lack of respect for me as a person, me as supposedly her friend, and my personal emotional boundaries. All while I tiptoe around on eggshells trying to make sure that I always, constantly, afford her the respect that she never once bothered to afford me. Yes, never. Never, not once.

Someone asked me today if she even realized she was doing what she’s going. And you know… for the sake of my sanity, and for her own sake, I really hope she’s just blissfully unaware… because if she’s actually understanding what she’s doing… and still doing it…. then that says a lot about her as a person… and a lot about her values, or lack thereof. A lot of things that even after 6 years, I can admit to never seeing from her before.

Anyway…

When last we left the saga that was my life in Gor, I believe I was escaping my Jarl from Unknown and His Psychobitch of a Companion. I ran to the Port City of Bazi, to a former friend who was the Administrator there, and asked Him to rebrand me… because my Jarl’s brand was too painful to look at. Meanwhile, I guess the Master Admin had been a little more than drunk…. as He slipped with the branding iron and instead of putting the Port brand over my Jarl’s personal brand… He merely pressed the side of the iron into my skin and burned a deep gash over my Jarl’s personal brand, marring it, but scarring my left thigh.

From there, I was stolen by the Head Slaver of Sais, but never processed. I escaped from there ((side note: I really didn’t want to roleplay in By the Book… lol… it bores me… I like to raid.)) and ended up back in the Unknown camp as a camp bond… even if they didn’t really have many, if any, of those.

A few weeks later, I ran into a familiar face when Vydarr came to raid Unknown. Before I knew it, I was dragged off to the docks in binds and was taken to have a cap roleplay with a couple good friends of mine, one I’ve known for about 5 years, and one I’ve known for about 6. Because captive roleplays tend to only last an hour, because that’s when your camp can come rescue you… Unknown came to rescue me, and subsequently took the slave of the Woman who’d captured me. And then, when she wouldn’t put out (aka: wouldn’t voice fuck Him in Skype… yeah… don’t ask…) He decided He needed to lay down, and gave her to me to roleplay. Now, when I was at Vydarr as a captive, we’d been joking around OOCly that if I wasn’t playing my Owner as an NPC (non-playing character… aka: He doesn’t exist as someone playing Him, but He exists in theory, because there is no such thing as an unowned slave on Gor) then She would just offer me a collar and I could come to Vydarr and roleplay there.

I like ROLEPLAY… and that’s the one thing I was severely lacking during my time at Unks. Sure, they raid a lot, so I could volunteer to take a cap if I wanted to… but as for roleplay within the group… Hell, I didn’t know half the group because they were never around… and the fact that none of us actually roleplayed TOGETHER. We stood around waiting for raids or rescues. That was our life. So the idea of roleplaying amongst group members was extremely appealing. Plus, given that I am still trying to heal from everything that happened with my Jarl and Psychobitch, it was a “safe” collar. I could be Owned as a Gorean slave should be… but I was Owned by friends… there was no pressure.

When the captive’s rescue came in, I dragged her through the tunnels and out to the back dock, putting her on the boat and sailing her and sailing WITH HER. I “ran away” essentially… and was thus collared to Kota and Ost, was renamed Sapphire, and had two chain sisters: Ruby (formerly named Amethyst), and Jade.

Where her story sits currrently…. we know I’m a masochist… so I won’t go into the specifics, because I know not all of my readership are masochists.. but for the time being, Sapphire cannot speak. She should start to be able to speak softly within the next day or so… but right now, she cannot speak. And as such, it’s made for some interesting rp when I’ve been taken captive. In fact, I almost got killed by Ghosts. They wanted to kill me because OOCly, they were mad that my rescue didn’t come in before they had to go rescue Theirs from our camp… lol. But the reason they were trying to use ICly (after the “you attacked a Free” didn’t work, because I was defending my home), is that my Captor was telling me Sapphire was technically “useless” because she couldn’t communicate any of her skills to Him, and He couldn’t use (yes, that kind of ‘use’) her throat.