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Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I was making some pumpkin bread today because I'm such an awesome homemaker and that's just the kind of thing I do. No? Would you believe that I was making it because I had a sweet tooth attack and there was nothing good to eat in the house despite the fact that I'd gone to the grocery store just last night? I knew I should've saved some cookies for today!So I was making pumpkin bread when my three year old wandered into the kitchen.

CLAY: Whatcha doing, Mommy? Are you making a birthday cake for me?ME: Is it your birthday?CLAY: Yes!ME: Really? (in case you're wondering, it is not his birthday) How old are you now?CLAY: One, two, three, five, six, eleven!ME: Eleven? Wow! You're getting pretty old.CLAY: You're really old Mom.ME: Gee thanks, hon. Well, I'm not making a birthday cake today. I'm making pumpkin bread.CLAY: Can I help you?ME: Oh please no! Don't you want to go watch something stupid on television instead. Sure!

So I measured the ingredients and Clay poured them into my mixer. I let him smell the cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves before spooning them out. He thought they smelled so good that he shared with Brooklyn and let her smell the container of nutmeg too. She took a nice big sniff, inhaled 1/2 a teaspoon of nutmeg, proceeded to cry, rub her nose and sneeze out brownish, nutmeg-colored snot. Note to self - next time no sniffing the ingredients before measuring and pouring.

So far, so good. He's actually doing a good job and is getting the ingredients mostly IN the bowl. I showed him how to turn my mixer on low speed and he had fun watching the bread dough combine. I added the last two cups of flour and turned around to put the measuring cup in the sink when Clay turned my mixer on. High speed. The highest speed ever. It looked like it was snowing in my kitchen. Flour poofed out everywhere. Have you ever had improvements that required drywall done in your house? You know that drywall dust that clings to everything for months? Flour might just be worse. I, of course, used the utmost calm as I called to Clay to turn off the mixer while I ran across the kitchen.

Because I maintained such a serene disposition, Clay freaked out and turned the mixer up even higher. Boy, it was fun times around here. After I got the flour explosion cleaned up, I got to clean up Brooklyn who was playing in the flour and licking it up off the counters. Mmmm, who needs butter, pumpkin, spices, or eggs when you've got delicious plain ole flour.

I can't wait til we start making Christmas cookies! I make a LOT of Christmas cookies. Cookies are the best food group, after all.

Several of you have asked me for an update on Julian. Here he is his first day in FL... What a way to spend your vacation - in the hospital. :( At least he's got some cool friends around him!

According to the update on his Carepages, he had a good day yesterday and the whole family had fun. Here's a much better picture of a little boy having fun! Thank you for your prayers. I know Mimi and her family really appreciate them!

76 comments:

Your stories remind me so much of when my 14 year old was Clay's age. I had a bright idea of making homemade pasta one time until he decided that everything needed to go thru the pasta machine, including his play dough. Yep you guessed it the pasta machine was history after that cuz I wasn't, errrr didn't have the time to take the whole thing apart to clean.

Just a note of caution....try Googling nutmeg. I did, because we use it in my job, and it said that ingested in larger quantities, it can have an effect similar to "ecstacy", the party drug. It would take a considerable amount for an adult (6 tsp), but I don't know that I would allow my kids to "snort" it, either, just to be on the safe side. It was done with teh most innocent of intent, but please be careful.Love your blog! Am anxious for your book.

This is exactly what would happen at my house. My oldest is four. He is a "helper" -- I can relate. Currently his help seems to come around when diapers need to be thrown away. Lets just say that it does not always end up the way I would hope.

I'm so glad to know that I'm not the only mom that does [i]such a fantastic job of keeping her cool[/i]. Guess I've been to too many PTA meetings lately and the super-uber-soccer-moms are really starting to get to me. Not that there's anything wrong with them... I just can't imagine anything ever going wrong in one of their kitchens KWIM?

This is my first time to comment even though I have been reading your blog every day since the ebay listing. I absolutly love your stories and reading them I always remember my childhood days. I am the eldest of 6 children, the youngest is only 5 (I am 21) so all your stories are so similar.Anyway I love your blog and i cant wait to buy your book. Keep up the great writing, you really make the smallest things seem so interesting and funny.Just a note though, nutmeg has the same effect as ecstasy. My highschool friend used to swallow/eat/sniff a few teaspoons to get high off it. Very foolish and stupid I know.http://www.intotherain.org

Well, now I can feel relieved that I never got around to buying myself one of those electric mixers. Though my kids manage to make a mess anyway. Did you know that if you don't clean sweet potatoes off your kitchen walls right away (say, within 2 months or so), they harden into something the consistency of cement. And you end up having to repaint? Fun kitchen fact, almost as fun as that fact about nutmeg.

Oh my goodness, I'm totally laughing hysterically right now! I have a 3 year old and I can sooooo see this happening in my house. It's just the kind of thing that 3 year olds do! Love it. Keep up the good work and keep the stories coming. We all need a good laugh after a hard day sometimes.

You gave a mixer to a "one, two, three, five, six, eleven" year old? And then threw a bowl full of flour into this mix. At anyone one of those ages I might think that your decision warranted : psychological evaluation. In other words... You're crazy!!!

I love when my kids "help" with baking. I made turkey pot pie and had to make my own crust since the stores ran out...thanks to all the pumpkin pie eaters..thanks ALOT!

Anyway, all 5 of my kids wanted to touch the dough and lick the dough and who knows what else with it. They are 4 yr. old triplets and 6 yr. old twins. Lots of helping hands! Needless to say, we prayed hard and long over that meal!

Rofl! That was soooo funny!! I just LOVE it (NOT!) when my 3 year old wants to help out in the kitchen... what better way to spend the afternoon than cleaning up various ingredients off the work surfaces, floor, walls, cooker, etc after a cake baking session!!!

One of my earliest memories involved a "flour explosion" in our kitchen when I was around 3 yrs old. My mom and Aunt were making homemade cinnamon rolls and for some reason the flour container exploded everywhere , all over me , my mom, my aunt & the entire kitchen. I think the reason I remember it was because of being upset about it my mom and aunt laughed themselves silly. It was so crazy my dad got out the "super 8" movie camera and filmed it.

Thanks so much for your honesty and they way you turn the craziness into good ole' belly laughs! It brings back so many memories.

My kids attended a pre-school years ago where they used real hammers, saws and wood (with supervision), took care of real bunnies, chickens and turtles (with supervision), climbed real trees, played on real tire swings, learned to ride two-wheel bikes, made French Toast and homemade "Gak". They did this all in one day while dressed in bridal or Batman attire (all with supervision).

The point I would like to make is, "with supervision." This is how they learn about the world, no matter how much we have to clean up after them. You are an awesome mom, Dawn! Never lose your sense of humor.

Oh, about your reaction to the new wallpaper in your kitchen...you may be practicing for the day when the oldest has his driving permit....it's all part of growing up...especially for us moms!

Oh the joys of baking with kids, I made gingerbread cookies one year when my son was 4 and as I was taking cookies out of the oven he ate all the heads off the ones already made. This year my youngest is that age so it should be a fun baking season. Something about kids that age that makes them want to "help" and it just makes your job tougher. Just think of the memories you'll have though.

Dawn, I just want you to know that your blog provides me w/ that nice laugh that i need at the end or beginning of each day. We just got some shocking/scary news regarding my 3 yr old daughter last week. I've been on this computer pretty much nonstop researching this cyst she has on her brain. But i always manage to find my way to your blog to get that best bit of medicine in times like this. You are doing so much more than i think you even realize! :)

Thanks to you Dawn - I woke up singing the HR Puffnstuff song this morning! It goes over and over in my head now! What were they thinking when they put that on TV? Better yet, what drugs were they on... "Can't do a little, and you can't do enough" - that is drugs for sure.... LOL and it is in their lead song!How did that pumpkin bread turn out? Was there any remaining to bake?

Oh Dawn...I feel for you.We are taught that GOOD moms bake WITH their kids...I would like to know the percentage of moms that REALLY do this...because when I attempt it, I feel like a good mom until somethig similar to your fiasco happens and then I turn into Mommy Dearest (I really DON'T but I feel like I did after the fact)...WHY do we try to live up to standards set by....by....WHO THE HECK SETS THESE STANDARDS????

Hi Dawn! I just LOVE your blog and you make me laugh EVERYday. I wanted to let you know that Julian has been in my thoughts and prayers. I have tried to visit his CarePage but when I click on the link it just takes me to the main carepage page. I tried doing a search for Julian and for Julians World and I get nothing. I would love to visit his page to post my well wishes.

I am not as long suffering as you. I finally lowered myself to refrigerator cookies when cookies with the kids. They can still roll them out and cut them, bake them frost them. It is good to see Julian smiling. He is in my prayers.

Dude, know what you need to make this year for Christmas treaties? Chocolate covered potato chips. Oh yes. Like they have at Morkes chocolates in Palatine. Easiest stuff to make, and after throwing some drop cloths around, you could set the kids down at the table and let them have at it: 1) melt milk chocolate chips in a bowl, 2) dip thick ridged chips (saltier the better), 3) tap the chip to get rid of excess chocolate, 4) lay on wax paper and let 'em cool. They are AWESOME. Just duct tape the kids to the kitchen chairs so they don't "spread the chocolate love" all over the house. Hehehe

I can't remember how I found your blog, but it is like I'm reading my own life story! This reminds me of our Thanksgiving cooking day and how the kids wanted to help make EVERYTHING-including the turkey! We had a good time, but I think I was the one that spilled milk AND gravy that day-all down the cabinet, floor, in the cracks of the stove-where they will reside forever! Good times, cooking with kids, good times-and Oh, the memories we are making together! (yeah, remember that time I was thisclose to blowing up the mixer and you accidentally sniffed too much of the nutmeg and we had to rush you to the hospital?!) Fun times!!!

On Thanksgiving day, I heated up the burner to brown my sausage, all of a sudden had to use the bathroom. I heard an explosion, and I had turned on the wrong burner. On the wrong burner was were my homemade apple pie HAD been sitting. It exploded all over my ceiling and walls and floors. I had glass in my stuffing and veggies. Note to self; Pyrex does just fine in the oven, not the stovetop!

Cooking with kids is always a joy! In my house, when we have baking or cooking accidents, I clean from the countertops up and the dogs clean from the underside of the countertops down! We have an efficient system. I just don't let other people see us doing it...

My three year old loves to "help", too. We recently made a rub for chicken to put on the grill. When I turned around he began to put extra pinches of salt in the mix. I didn't realize how many extra until we ate it. Or should I say, attempted to eat it.

Isn't it great when your 3 year old wants to "help" make things with you? My 3 year old always asks to help. I've also had him turn the mixer to full speed when I've added flour. Then he likes to eat the flour. Yuck!

Sweet - nutmeg works like X? I might have to try that...just kidding. Just the thought of sniffing something up my nose makes me want to sneeze.

That's so awesome that Julian got visits from some Disney characters! How kind they were to go to the hospital to see him. I'll be keeping Julian & his family in my prayers (as well as you and yours...)

What makes this even funnier for me is that it reminds me of when I was in culinary school - about 2 months from graduating... I had used a KA stand mixer for 2 years at this point. On this particular day, I'm making bread, and the flour flew EVERYWHERE!!! I had flour in my toque, my glasses, eyelashes, hair... It serisously looked my stand mixer had erupted. Flooh! lol So you can tell Clay that it happens to professionals too. ;)

On another note, I would call poison control about the snorting of the nutmeg. Not to worry you or anything, but just to make sure that everything is ok. Nutmeg is the inner seed of Mace, which is commonly used for "pepper" spray.

Care to post your sugar cookie recipe? I am the epitome of lazy - I bought sugar cookie dough in square form at the store... was planning to roll it out for the kids to make shapes. Is that pathetic or what?

I,too, love your blog. Just started one of my own about my new experiences of being Mom, dog trainer and wife.

Anyhow just wanted to tell you that those memories and messes made in the kitchen have a very deep impact. I uesed to nanny my older sisters kids and one of our favorite things was cooking together. Now that they are in highschool they cook for the family occasionally and I find that some of the best gifts to give them are cooking books--they love them. We often talk about the memories and messes we made together. I just hope my own kids will take to it as well. Thanks for a great read every day!! :)

Mmmm... cookies! I love holiday baking. This year I am also making Fragrant Indian Brittle (Gourmet Magazine, Dec. 2006 - the recipe is on my blog so you can just click my screename to see it). I haven't made candy in ages and I am so excited. I'll remember to make sure my 4 yr old uses only a wooden spoon and keep the mixer to anyone 8 and older.

My son did a first-class cinnamon inhale when he was about 2. It was sitting in a glass jar next to the front door (where it had been returned by a neighbor) and I heard my son coughing and gagging. I looked down the stairs, without my glasses on, and saw a brownish crud all over his face. He had opened the jar and taken a HUGE sniff. Scared us both to death, and he was blowing brown gunk out of his nose for the rest of the day! (Yecch!)

Oh, Dawn, now you have my scared. I bake all the time with my kids (my 4 year old can tell me all the ingredients AND in order for chocolate chip cookies), but I haven't had a flour incident yet. Emphasis on the YET. I never thought that he might figure out how to turn on my mixer. His favorite is sticking his finger in the bowl to "see if I'm making it right" and taste. Germs get killed at 350 degrees, right?

My kids are also into smelling all the ingredients. For nutmeg, I always grind fresh (actually, I do that with cloves, etc., too). It tastes better, and they can smell the nutmeg "pod" without inhaling at least. I never thought about that when they're smelling the cinnamon. Hmmm. Microplane makes the BEST grater ever for all sorts of small things like nutmeg and lemon zest and cheese.

And for the poor woman who lost her apple pie, I can totally relate. Shortly after graduating college, back when my culinary knowledge was sadly lacking, I decided to make flan for a dinner party a friend was giving to show off for my boyfriend. You start by making a melted sugar concoction that you then pour into the pan and swish around to coat the bottom before it hardens. Me being the easily distracted 22 year old forgot to swish, and it hardened. So I turned on my stove and decided to re-melt it on the stovetop in the glass pan I was using. Thank GOD it used safety glass, as it exploded EVERYwhere. When I moved out, I'm sure the new tenants two years later discovered bits of broken glass. It was in my hair and everything. So much for showing off for my boyfriend. Thankfully, my culinary skills have greatly improved since then (along with my logic of oven is 200-500 degrees, plain fire is much greater for anyone wondering...). I think that was my worst disaster. I think I remade it in a different pan, and it turned out ok but I know I haven't made it since then!

Am I the only mom who cooks with her kids whose kids disappear as soon as the "fun" part of putting the ingredients in is done? I vaguely remember ditching out on my mom as soon as the dough was mixed leaving her to hours of tending pans to bake, so maybe it's just payback.

Your stories are great. Reminds me so much of when my boys were younger and sitting on the counter with me baking. Ingredients go everywhere, isn't that why they invented cleaning solutions? I tell ya, it is a conspiracy. On T-day this year, put the heavy cream into the mixer bowl, turned around to put a bowl in the sink to find my mixer going crazy, I had a ring of whipped cream around my kitchen, and the Kid wasn't even in the room, he came in laughing as I was trying to clean it up ... , oh wait so was my mom, saying do it again, do it again, ok he is 14. Keep on baking with them, it teaches them how to cook

Hi Dawn, I am a foster mother of a 3 year old, he loves to 'help' in the kitchen, but after a similar experiance turned my kitchen into a danger zone, I banned him from the kitchen!

I was wondering if you ever had a "boy was my face red" moment like the one that I had today after he got to see his mother, when he offer to -expose- himself to one of my friends, and then started to pull his pants down, Because my first thought was "I'm sure this would never happen to a (biological) parent".

Dawn, this Nana loves to "bake cookies" with her grandkids. I go to the grocery store and buy about 8 dozen premade, prebaked, precut Christmas cookies in the kids favorite shapes, tree, ornament and stars then I load up on frosting, sprinkles in all different shapes, sizes and colors, (please Nana don't forget to get pink sprinkles - this from the 5yo granddaughter), about 100 tubes of decorating icing in every color - well maybe 10 but it seems like 100. Then I stop at the dollar store and buy about 3 plastic table cloths to put on the table and around the floor. The four grand kids come over, they range in age from 12 to 2. We divide up the cookies and get racks to place the "finished" product on and they are off and running. They love decorating their own cookies, we've been doing this ever since the 12 yo was about 2. He still loves doing it. The next two are girls and the youngest is a boy. We also do cookies for Valentines, again with pre made heart cookies from the store. This Nana loves to cook, but with 4 helpers I find the premade is the best way for us!

Now I really feel old, I NEVER in a hundred years would of even thought anything about the kids sniffing the spices, who would of thought, nutmeg = ectasy?

Pumpkin Bread for a sweet tooth attack? Boy, that's a lot of work. I usually just make Caramel Corn or Cow Patties (remember those no-bake peanut butter chocolate oatmeal cookies?). They all take only about 5 minutes. Of course, if I wait long enough, the sweet tooth might leave me! But who wants to do that? :-)

Baking with kids always sounds nice, and looks wonderful in magazine photos, but usually ends up with everyone upset and/or crying! And then after I clean up the mess of making the cookies, the kids eat the darn things, which creates even more messes, and I swear I will never bake again.

Just today I was wondering if I had it in me to bake Christmas cookies with the kids. Maybe after having some wine.

Hi Dawn, When my mother was young she tryed to make some bread when her mother was not at home. For some odd reason she was not allowed to do this without mom home. She said she buried the dough in the back yard to not get caught. Well the sunshine came out and so did the raising dough out of the ground. Thought this was a funny story. Kristine in Michigan

Hi Dawn,Just wanted to say how much i love reading your blog, i have just had my 6th baby, he is now 6 weeks old and my others are 2,3,5,6 and 8, It is chaotic and i can so relate to what you write....Thanks for putting a smile on my face at the end of a crazy dayCheersCassandra

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOUfor making me feel like my home is somewhat normal -- or I mean normal for lots of kids. We are about to add babies no. 4 & 5 to our other three (the oldest just turned 5) and they LOOOOVE to help.

Do yours blow the crumbs out of their mouth when they are eating it because that is what happened to my pumpkin muffins this week. WHile throwing grapes all over the dining room (probably spitting them).

Hi Dawn, I love reading your blog. You just crack me up!! I don't have any kids yet but hope to some day. Anyways, I noticed that you like to bake cookies and didn't know if you get the 12 Days of Cookies emailed to you. It's on the Food Network website and it's pretty neat. They email you recipes for 12 days. I think they are on Day 4 so check it out. They have some really good recipes on there. Hope you have a great holiday!

I make the cookie dough ahead of time and freeze it, usually mixing it up at night. Then, on one of the 3 days I don't go to work, the kids and I can bake cookies much faster. Pull dough out when I get up, it is soft enough to work with after breakfast when the older kids are at school.

It either that or have my 17 yr old bake them for me. She loves to bake, as long as someone else washes the dishes when she is done.