Christian men for Trump!

Waiting in line for credentials at the Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

The Republican National Committeefinally posted its convention program schedule on its much-touted mobile app Monday morning. As I rode into downtown Cleveland, some fellow train riders boisterously made fun of the C-list celebrities that were scheduled to speak. “Scott Baio? Seriously?!?” I was about to tell them that the program will feature a couple of soap stars, too, but they exited the train before I could get in a word.

The unusually late release of the convention schedule might have been a hint of the disorganization that was to come. I knew – or thought I knew – exactly where I was supposed to go to get my press credentials. The folks in charge of the process had sent multiple emails amending the location and time of pick-up. But the last message, sent just the weekend before the convention, made the procedure seem straightforward.

I was greeted at the Cleveland Federal Building by a long and slow-moving line. It was, at first, kind of cool to be stuck waiting with a number of media celebrities. (I somehow thought they were above enduring such indignities.) But the wait became more and more uncool by the minute. My writing notebook and laptop were 14 floors below, at the security checkpoint. I left them there because I naively thought I would be back down quickly.

Once I finally made it through the process, I headed to the convention’s media filing center, where there was supposedly a desk waiting for me in an air-conditioned room. I was promptly told that my precious badge would not get me in. After about an hour of straight-to-voicemail phone calls, and many, many block’s worth of back-and-forth through muggy downtown Cleveland, I found out that I would need a second set of credentials. It was at an office almost a mile from where I got the first badge. By the time I got to the second office, it was closed for the day. I would be ‘on the outside’ until at least the following morning.

This did give me the opportunity to join in the outraged bitch session developing in the lobby of the second office building. I was, it turned out, far from the only member of the press who had been confused by the blizzard of emails that the credentialing crew sent in the lead-up to the convention. One writer from Los Angeles opined that this disorganization reflects the state of the Republican Party right now. Tom Hauser, chief political reporter for KSTP-TV in Minneapolis, was fuming. “I have been to every national political convention since 2000. This is by far, not even close, the most disorganized media credentialing process I have ever seen.”

In case you were ready to shed a tear for us press folks who were left out in the cold, there really was plenty going on the outside of the convention. On the banks of the Cuyahoga River, famous for having been so polluted in 1969 that it caught fire, a group called America First held a ‘unity’ rally in support of Donald Trump.

Christopher Cox, founder of Bikers for Trump. The group is in Cleveland, in part, to assist police with security.

The crowd was dotted with people wearing “Hillary for Prison 2016” shirts. There was also plenty of “911 = Inside Job” apparel, likely because conspiracy hero Alex Jones was on the speaker bill.

Among the event’s organizers was Bikers for Trump founder Christopher Cox. He spoke with reporters as the event was underway. “We need a commander-in-chief … who is going to be able to bring jobs back to America. We have ghost towns all across Pittsburgh and upstate New York. I’m here for the working man.” The Bikers are not in Cleveland merely to show their support for the job magician. “We feel like it’s open season on police officers. We will be there to help serve and protect [them].” (Police always appreciate a little vigilante ‘help’ during a crisis, right?)

Vaughn held court at the side of the stage after his speech. A reporter asked why he, a black man, would support Donald Trump. “Mr. Barack Hussein Obama has been the most, the most, divisive president of the United States. Mr. Obama is unfortunately one of the Soros people,” he said, referring to George Soros, the billionaire who gives heavily to liberal causes. Vaughn also praised the judge who Monday found Baltimore police Lt. Brian Rice not guilty in the 2015 post-arrest death of African-American Freddie Gray.

Milwaukee native Tom Ertl was selling Trump paraphernalia at the America First rally. He is the National Media Director for Christians for Donald Trump.

I asked Ertl what he would say to those who observe that Donald Trump has lived his life in a not-terribly Christian manner. Ertl first brought up the allegation that Trump owns a strip club. He (correctly) pointed out that Trump no longer owns the casino at which the club is located. (Trump lost it in a bankruptcy proceeding, soon after the strip club opened.) Anyway, “we [Christians] see a lot of tremendous personal character attributes in [Trump] that are really important for a leader. He’s got all those male characteristics that God … intended for men to act like. For the last two generations, we see around us everywhere … men that have been feminized.”

For all the time I spent in downtown Cleveland today, I only saw one act of protest. It was a large but very confined and controlled march. It gave me reason to hope that the chaos many predicted would transpire outside the convention hall will not come to pass.

As I made my way back to my exurban hotel, much earlier than I had intended, I heard that the anti-Trump faction was causing a stir on the convention floor. Former Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli went so far as to throw his delegate credentials to the floor in disgust when a procedural ruling seemed to finally kill the insurgency.

Well, the Dump-Trumpers have been declared dead any number of times over the past couple weeks. Perhaps the chaos this week will be found inside the convention, not outside.