I'm Judging You: The Do-Better Manual

Summary

Comedian, activist, and hugely popular culture blogger at AwesomelyLuvvie.com Luvvie Ajayi serves up necessary advice for the masses in this hilarious book of essays.

With over 500,000 readers a month at her enormously popular blog, AwesomelyLuvvie.com, Luvvie Ajayi is a go-to source for smart takes on pop culture. I'm Judging You is her debut book of humorous essays that dissects our cultural obsessions and calls out bad behavior in our increasingly digital, connected lives. It passes on lessons and side-eyes on life, social media, culture, and fame, from addressing those terrible friends we all have, to serious discussions of race and media representation, to what to do about your fool cousin sharing casket pictures from Grandma's wake on Facebook.

With a lighthearted, razor sharp wit and a unique perspective, I'm Judging You is the handbook the world needs, doling out the hard truths and a road map for bringing some "act right" into our lives, social media, and popular culture. It is the Do-Better Manual.

Reviews

I was not familiar with the author, and the cover copy makes it seem like this is going to be another one of those books written by a blogger or celebrity that try very hard to be funny but don't say anything of substance.I was a bit surprised by how wrong that assumption was! Luvvie covers social media, bad manners, and other somewhat trivial topics with insight and wit. Where she really shines, however, is in the section of the book discussing impossible standards of beauty, racism, honophobia, sexism, and other social issues.I occasionally disagree with her on minor points, and there are certainly other books thoroughly examining these topics, but she does a fantastic job at giving an overview of the issues. She's oirreverent and funny and ultimately challenging readers to be more thoughtful better people. I think this book will really be enjoyed by serious-minded readers in their 20s and 30s who will understand the pop culture references sprinkled throughout.

Very good collection of why all of us deserve a little side-eye (or maybe a lot), but even though it was fairly short, I felt like it went on too long at times. I would have edited a couple of these down. Plus, I am side-eying Ajayi for her essay on religion. She was busy defending her own embrace of Christianity while basically lumping all non-believers together as attacking Christianity. As a non-believer, I am so sick of having religion crammed down my throat. I am (mostly) a good person and I don't need a bunch of religious hypocrites telling me what I'm doing wrong (not saying that Ajayi is a hyprocrite) while some of these so-called Christians have so much hate in their hearts. End of soapbox. Also, I didn't appreciate being lumped in with all other white women in this country as being "priveleged." I may not have endured racism, but I am still facing misogyny and now you can factor ageism into the equation. We all have burdens and we should work together to lift those burdens rather than accusing others of not doing enough to lift ours. If I'm required to march in the streets to uplift black women, then she needs to march in the streets to uplift this aging, liberal atheist. Deal?

Somehow, I hadn’t heard of Ms. Ajayi until a couple of months ago. Clearly, I have been missing out. Thankfully I learned of her via this great collection of essays.

When, after seeing the entertaining cover, someone asked what I was reading, I described it as a little bit silly but a lot serious. Some of the topic areas might be considered lighter fare, which is what I was expecting for the whole of the book (again, my fault, as I wasn’t familiar with the author). But it’s so much more than an amusing frolic through modern-day ways people act like asshats; it’s also a collection of essays on serious topics.

These topics benefit from Ms. Ajayi’s talented way with words; she can drop in a clever aside or snide remark into a very serious essay without breaking up the flow. It doesn’t lessen the impact; instead it reminds the reader that these issues are not so esoteric that we can’t all have a vested interested in addressing them.

Ms. Ajayi discusses rape culture, racism, religion, fame, feminism and more in this collection, and I felt I either related to or learned something from nearly every one. The only section where I felt some measure of disagreement (and it was such a tiny measure) was with her description of atheists. I appreciate that as an atheist I was already going to be a bit sensitive to what anyone says about this group, and others might read it and totally agree with her take on us. Regardless, even that bit was edifying to a degree.

I was expecting an entertaining etiquette book and instead got deep social criticism, and that ended up being exactly what I needed.

I was suckered in by the book teaser and excited to read and win a review copy of this book. Important note right off the bat: the book's author, Luvvie Ajayi, is a blogger - I had never heard of her and had never (and still haven't) seen her blog. To me, she was an entirely fresh voice, but to anyone familiar with her, I'm not sure if it's fresh content or rewarmed from stuff she's already served up for her blog audience.This is not a book that I'd typically buy and I quite liked it. It's a cultural critique and it's snippy and smart - Luvvie has a strong POV and an interesting and distinct voice. I found myself nodding along as several of the things that bring out her side-eye, draw a huge eyeroll and raise my blood pressure too! Some of the situations/types of people she calls out that I particularly relate to: those people who so badly need validation from their social media "friends" and followers, the herd mentality and lack of chivalry and manners of airline passengers and the the rise of Twitter as a news source and subsequent decline of critical thought, journalistic credibility and accuracy.These are common annoyances and they're keenly observed and fun. She takes a different tone, edgy social humorist on more important topics such as homophobia, racism and rape culture. These have more bite to them - and they should. Those are terrible and systematic problems within the US. While I didn't always agree with everything she says, she speaks to them authentically and through the lens of her experience. Her perspective is smart, well thought out and she's an interesting voice in the chorus on some really serious societal issues.I also appreciate that she's firm on where she stands when it wouldn't necessarily be obvious or guessed. For example, she professes she's a Christian, yet writes in a way that doesn't seem to be 'closed' to people of other beliefs and faiths or those who aren't believers or spiritual at all.What is jarring to me about the book is that it doesn't always know what it wants to be. It starts out talking about rude behavior in airports and ends up addressing racism (as an example). However, her writing style and voice make her better suited to credibly addressing the former than the latter. Sometimes, she gets a little too cutesy and it detracts from what could be a real zinger of a point. There's only so much "smizes," "summagoats," and "dambs" that this reader could take. I appreciate a good inventive invectives as much as anyone, but enough is enough. If you have to footnote to explain your use of "damb" versus "damn," stop it already. Some of her asides made me laugh out loud - "...tasted like the tears of my disappointed ancestors" or "my bae Netflix." She's clever and I appreciate when her humor is intelligent and barbed. However, like some comics that get desperate for audience reaction, she sometimes becomes a little too desperate for a laugh. She's so original of a voice, that you don't want to see/read her going for lowbrow bits for a shock value reaction...and yet she does, a few times (talking about you, bit on anal bleach).All in all, this book is worth a TBR pile add and recommended as a smart, original and sharply-humored diatribe on some of the trials, tribulations and serious illnesses of modern culture.I suspect it could be even better as an audiobook.

I thought I'd be getting a "hilarious book of essays". I love to laugh, and think I do fairly easily, but this book was just not funny to me. Perhaps I am not the demographic for this book because I did not get the slang she used, let alone her made-up words (with definitions). That made it hard for me to get more than 50 pages in, so I scanned the rest of the book. Topics like race, rape, homophobia, religion and feminism aren't really what I would consider "hilarious", yet those are a good chunk of her book. I did find her chapter on #hashtag abuse interesting and fairly funny. Maybe if you are cooler and more hip than me, you might like this book. I didn't care for it.

I was not familiar with Luvvie Ajayi (or her blog) prior to receiving this book, but it sounded like it would be entertaining by its description, so I gave it a go. It's basically a series of essays picking apart some of the less desirable aspects of today's culture, with an encouragement for us, as a population, to do better. I initially enjoyed the book and had a few chuckles, but as it went on, it seemed to grow increasingly more preachy, and honestly, most of what was said was common sense. It wasn't nearly as humorous as I'd hoped, based on the back cover, describing it as a "hilarious book of essays." It almost seemed like Luvvie was trying too hard to be funny, with lots of made-up words & phrases that just didn't really add much of anything to the book and were annoying more than anything else. There were some good bits here and there, but overall, I could easily give or take this one.

I really enjoy what I've seen from Luvvie on social media; I think she's a strong voice and one we need to hear. Wasn't super sold on this book, though. Don't get me wrong, there were at least two parts where I laughed my ass off, but overall it was just ok.

I'm Judging You: The Do-Better Manual is a funny book, but Ajayi is preaching to the choir with her social and cultural insights. For the audience Ajayi is targeting, the book's observations are tired and repetitive. Luvvie's blog is great, but I would only recommend this book to those who are less familiar with the intersections between pop culture and social justice and its corresponding blogosphere.

I received an ARC of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This did not affect my opinion of this book or my review itself.In I'm Judging You: A Do-Better Manual, Luvvie Ajayi takes on the woes of the world, and does it all with wit and passion. From racism to sexism, social media to religion, nothing escapes Ajayi's scathing side-eye or sharp humor.What Did I Like?This is a book where I walked away feeling educated and fired up. Ajayi knows what she is talking about, and she makes you feel just how messed up so much of our world can be.And she does it all with a wonderful wit, full of sarcasm, biting retorts, and honest humor. Just when things start to feel painfully heavy, she will have you laughing out loud on the train (true story, by the way). Ajayi is masterful at knowing just when to intersperse her brilliant humor.Anything I Didn't Like?The book occasionally felt a little repetitive in terms of style and substance. I suspect I would not have felt this way had I been reading an article a day on her immensely popular website, as opposed to taking in essay after essay as set out in book form.So...?Read this book. It is that rare find that will make you think and make you laugh.

This book might not be for everyone. Parts of it could be considered political (which is always a hot-button topic for some people and therefore not something they want to discuss or read about) and humor is always subjective (which is why some people enjoy insult comics and others can't stand them and just want them to shut up). So, that being said the content and the writing style for this book might not appeal to everyone- so if you were going to recommend it to someone I would suggest you pick who you recommend it to wisely. I, however, found the book very amusing (as did my mother when I read little snippets to her) and enjoyed the book quite a bit. Not everything in it is something that can relate to everyone- and not everyone will agree with her opinions but that doesn't take away from how fun of a read the book actually was.

Anyone who needs a good laugh or someone to slap them with some truth, read this. I listened to it on audio and Luvvie read it and she did such an incredible job. You could tell how much passion she put into this book. I constantly was laughing out loud or being like this is so true!

I am not really sure how or why this became a book. The author was unknown to me prior to reading this book. She apparently has a web site and according to the book considers herself a comedian,activist, and culture blogger.The book is broken down into 4 parts.Part 1. Focuses on the different types of friends people are based on their behavior. Some of this was mildly funny and true, the problem is she uses terms in place of commonly known words- not really sure why, and sometimes gives a definition for them but not always, (a glossary would be helpful). Other times their is not definition. I get that the reader of this book will likely be in their 20's and already familiar with the author, but if she wants to expand her audience she should consider speaking like an adult. One chapter is called When Baehood Goes Bad, what the heck is Baehood?The second section is a total waste of time, it is the authors stance on race. Ready for the surprise, whites are to blame for every problem. How original! Sections 3-4 are about how social media has made us a living soap opera, and affected how we gain knowledge. Again none of this is original, seldom is it funny or entertaining. I really don't understand the point of this book.

I couldn’t finish it. The writing was fine, and I pretty much agree with everything she says, but it’s just… exhausting. Too much moral crusading, not enough petty judginess. Don’t get me wrong, I agree with the moral crusading -- the book just isn’t funny enough to make me rehash all these issues again. Been there, done that, got the women's studies minor; I'm not learning anything or seeing any new perspectives. Or laughing all that much.I want to hear more about annoying friends and group dinner leaches, not three pages on how Nigerians are habitually late (the author is Nigerian, and habitually late) and entire chapters on why sexim makes no sense.Also, the little footnotes explaining that she’s used words like “damb” because “it’s more fun” … yeah, that’s not as funny as she thinks it is. Explaining a joke ruins it. Explaining accented speech is just… weird.There's absolutely an audience for this book; it just isn't me.

I admit, I was curious about this book so all I did was read the sample .... Good Lord.... I regret it.Right from the kicker, we learn if you're not Nigerian you pretty much don't know crap. Cue up the My Big Fat American Gypsy Wedding show because that is exactly who she is reminding me of.And my good gah. If you happen to eat ANY DIFFERENT than her *loud horrified gasp* you are a Scrooge! How DARE you be different?!She goes on and on about how horrible these people are then straight up says that she oftentimes leaves midmeal (making her "Scrooge 3") then says Scrooge 3 tends to not even pay their part of the bill. THEN says "Okay, it's possible for this to happen once because we're all entitled to occasional absent-mindedness." buuuuut you just said oftentimes. Hmmm. Okay.Wow, you must be real fun. NOT!"I wish they would just be open and honest and let us know if they're going through a down time or a broke period."Really? Because judging from your previous statements, I wouldn't want to tell you diddly squat. Especially if you nitpick and act like you are so much better than others."Let's be honest, toddlers are the worst. Those tiny humans are needy and they want your constant attention and then they need your help doing everything. They are so lazy. Then they have the nerve to cry and throw tantrums and be ungrateful. And you just want to ask them, 'What have you done for me lately?'"Are you a freaking idiot? They are BABIES! What the hell do you expect them to do?! "What have you done for me lately?" wow. I feel horrible or anyone and everyone who knows you because you sound like a total asshole. Not to mention you were PROUD that you just scared your niece because she was doing what all babies do. That kid is gonna grow up with serious mental problems if she is around you very long. #sorrynotsorry___________________I could go on and on about the complete and total bull crap I read, but for the sake of my sanity, I won't. It's appalling. I really can't believe this was published in all honesty. This is beyond petty and pathetic. Only place this "book" belongs is on a burn pile. Haha

Have you ever read a book and wondered if it was possible to edit it down enough to put on some thick cardboard with colorful illustrations because small children should read it before they are allowed access to the internet or even other people? Me neither, until I read Luvvie Ajayi's "I'm Judging You."Luvvie's course of social critiques with a side order of wit had me saying "Well, that's good to know" and "Amen, sister!" throughout. It's unfortunate that our society needs a book like this, but thankfully Luvvie took the time to write this wonderful and hilarious manual to fill people with some sense and better judgment.