twitter pranksters

All We Heard Was ‘Scott Brown,’ ‘Twitter’ and ‘Gay’

2 many hawt pixxx of naked gay Scott Brown on Twitter whut??!!?! NO, boo, it’s just some story about one of naked Scott Brown’s dumb aides doing something dumb and very much NOT naked Scott Brown on Twitter. Scott Brown (and Mitt Romney!) aide Eric Fehrnstrom got caught using a fake Twitter account to impersonate the insane alter-ego of Scott Brown’s Democratic challenger Alan Khazei and made jokes about gay videos and a bunch of insider Massachusetts stuff no one understands, which is terrible, mostly because it is inane. We rate this “political scandal” a -4, because it got our hopes up. Damn you, Scott Brown’s lame aide! Oh well, did someone make Eric Fehrnstrom pretend to apologize?

“It was my Twitter acccount,” the aide said in an email to the Boston Globe. “Sometimes we take our politics too seriously and this was my way of lightening things up. As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

Its like its High School all over again but with more assholes than I remember. (Grow Up)

freakishlywrong

And more fucking bullies stealing yer lunch moniez.

Fare la Volpe

You clearly didn't spend enough time in the locker room showers.

Assholes for miles.

Redhead

No kidding. "Henh, henh, I'm gonna make fun of the gay kids who are already upset and struggling and feeling marginalized because, henh, easy target. And if anyone says anything about my vicious comments, well hey man, I was JUST KIDDING, you can't take a joke, lighten up. That'll totally get me off the hook for whatever asshole things I say! henh, henh."

SorosBot

Remembering high school and guys like this asshole I'm just surprised he resisted the urge to say "fag videos" instead. It's typical of Republicans, though, that they were the high school bullies and still have the bully mentality.

MichelesPantalones

Yesterday I learned right here at teh Wonketz that nut-punching is a new, exciting lovestyle of teh ghey. I therefore offer to totally nut-punch Eric Fernstrohm.

V572 T-Blow

This kind of nonsense will cease when Elizabeth Warren is coronated elected. What could work out better than a Harvard professor in government? Think of, say, Henry Kissinger…

Based on those twitter thingies, Eric should apologize for not being funny.

Tundra Grifter

Conservatives and humor go together like mustard and ice cream.

Seriously – if you want to cringe, watch, listen or read a right wing nut trying to be funny.

MichelesPantalones

I've been trying to figure out the astounding lack of funneh in the RWNJs. Someone mentioned that humour needs to skewer the power structure in order to appeal universally. But there's plenty of skewering of *everyone* going on in, say, Voltaire, or Shakespeare, or any of the examples of humour that have come down through the ages. I can't quite put my finger on it, but there's a streak of anger and meanness in the RWNJs' attempts at humour that make it unsuccessful and uncomfortable. Do give me your perspective, though.

MittsHairHelmet

Massachusetts… the smartest state in the country, still dumb enough to elect Scott Brown.

Glenn Beck stole his entire act from the Kids in the Hall, so why not?

AJWjr.

I used to work for a right-wingnut (I know, shocker) and when he thought he was being funny he'd snort and titter while trying to toss out the "punch line", making it entirely unintelligible. I liked my job, so I politely laughed.

His humor does seem to be aimed at the frat boy/teabagger intersection, more than anything else.

DashboardBuddha

Exactly…and this is one of the things that bugs me about him and his ilk. Drudge, O'Keefe et al are all braying fratboys. They are a real life Steve Dallas, taking delight in giving the world a wedgie.

jodyleek

"…real life Steve Dallas…"

I heart you for this, Buddha! Now, where are Opus and Lola Granola when you need 'em?

Lascauxcaveman

"real life Steve Dallas"?

These guys aren't worthy to polish Steve Dallas' tassel loafers.

James Michael Curley

A "Fehrnstrom" is what we olds call discovering a leak in the Depends while wearing white chinos.

Barrelhse

Tip: Lose the white chinos.

James Michael Curley

But they match my white Top Siders.

Barrelhse

That WAS you on the Duckboat!

AJWjr.

Hang in there, Labor Day is coming!

MichelesPantalones

And the white belt to hold them up, right?

MichelesPantalones

Welp, at least I'll know what to call the next shart now.

Teh Wonketz: alwayz wit teh helpful.

LesBontemps

this was my way of lightening things up

What, no gay hookers and meth? RINO.

chicken_thief

Needz moar James O'Keefe.

DashboardBuddha

Never…please, no more O'Keefe.

SorosBot

Oh I'd like to see more of O'Keefe – specifically his trial and getting his ass to prison where it belongs.

genxr

Undercover camera. Gay prostitute. Think about it.

widestanceshakedown

All I read from that was O'Keefe, Ass and Prison.

Fare la Volpe

I'd watch that porno.

Negropolis

Needz moar Georgia O'Keefe.

comrad_darkness

gay hookers meth and two wetsuits

MichelesPantalones

Don't forget the condom-covered dildo in the ass.

Gleem_McShineys

And the key ingredient: NOT ALIVE

(uh, with votes?)

GunToting[Redacted]

Neat! Mocking a program designed to try to convince persecuted kids from killing themselves is always good for a laff.

Tundra Grifter

Reminds me of the evening Johnny Carson just couldn't get his audience going.

"Should we bring out a fat guy and shoot at his feet?"

SayItWithWookies

There's nothing funnier than mocking people who don't live up to their own high standard of rugged individualism — right after they complain about being persecuted by the PC media.

Actually, it wasn't even an attempt at an apology. He simply fired another shot across the bow.

mumbly_joe

A commenter on TPM came up with a proposal that I highly support. Calling "scandals"(???) like this "Inside Baseball" is an insult to baseball, which may be extremely boring, but at least it's fun to overeat and overdrink while baseball is going on somewhere near you.

So, I hearby second his proposal for a new name for this sort of stuff: Incest Media. Not only is it so gross that even talking about it is gross, but you won't actually have any fun if you're near it, either.

Fare la Volpe

It's all relative.

SayItWithWookies

Now that News of the World is no longer tapping the royal family, I guess the name's available.

x111e7thst

"..if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.” Good one. Right up there with: "If you can't stand the blackface, don't go to the minstrel show".

The Repugs try to bring Amos & Andy to the History Channel in 3, 2, 1…

Tundra Grifter

Or, "Who knew there was anything wrong with watermelon jokes? My family has been telling them for years."

MichelesPantalones

Now imagine being a nonwhite person and hearing those jokes. And when you point out that they're not funny, what do these walking incarnations of pure chutzpah respond with? "Well, I don't understand why you're so sensitive! It's not like *you're* black, or anything." This to someone who looks black enough to black people to pass. Is there some degree of "blackness" one must have before finding watermelon jokes unfunny? I think I'm going to put together a book and title it When to Laugh, or The Appropriateness Of Ethnic Humour. If I survive that long.

Don't fuhget Franklin, we-ah in da Axis too. We has dis old geezah in town growin' up that was in the State Depahtment a wicked long time ago and met this big deal Egyptian pol named Nassah, who he said was a complete piece a' work. Anyway, latah the guy got a degree from MIT in astronomics or somethin' and cuz his old man worked with Big Joe, Jack called and got him into Nasser for a wicked pissah careah, but some asshole drunk statie fuckin' croaked 'em on 495. The statie screwed, but they found his body all fucked ovah back a the MTA shop in Braintree.

BaldarTFlagass

Betcha this guy wears his polo shirt with the collar turned up.

freakishlywrong

Ugh. And his visor backwards, so the awful part of a visor that's supposed to shade his face, and the only reason anyone wears those hideous things, is rendered worthless. But it gives him "street cred".

I believe that is usually spelt "laff." Just in case someone doesn't get the joke.

petehammer

Fehrnstrom is a classic combination of German words that we don't have a very exact definition for. I guess the closest is the feeling when you try so hard to poop – you're sitting and grunting, etc – that you end up pissing in your own face. It's more eloquent in German, but you get the gist of it.

Example – I was so focused on racing my bike that I ignored the red light and ended up Fehrnstroming myself on a truck.

freakishlywrong

I fist this post.

MichelesPantalones

Hope you got gloves on.

Barrelhse

"Fehrnstroming myself" sounds pleasant.

OC_Surf_Serf

Republicans reminding me why I hated the 7th grade…

Barb

"As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”
I thought it was "if you can't stand the kitchen or your kids, tweet stupid shit and make the Forbes list of powerful twats."

Tundra Grifter

Barb: That's borderline Brood Libel.

bikerlaureate

In flyover country it's more like "If you can't stand the sadistic bullying, get out of existence".

Negropolis

I though it was "if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen, unless you're a woman, in which case we've chained you to the hot stove."

tihond

It's like they say "If you want more news ink mention two in the stink."

Goonemeritus

“Sometimes we take our politics too seriously and this was my way of lightening things up. As they say in politics, if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

Yes nothing funnier than bullying gay teens into committing suicide. I swear sometimes these bastards make wish for the existence of an actual hell.

MichelesPantalones

Almost makes me wish I weren't an atheist.

fartknocker

Fuck Twitter. You need to explain to me why I am supposed to vote for you. Social media and politics is just a bunch of fucking noise.

Sorry about the rant. Me and Mr. Daniels had a little too much of each other last night. No sympathy is wanted.

Tundra Grifter

Only two Daniels worth a damn – Charlie and Jack.

And since he started being such a reactionary jerk (whatever happend to that redneck hippie?) I'm no longer so sure about Charlie.

You don't even have to be gay! All abstinence should include a suicide component! After all, X years without sex during your highest-ever hormone levels is something no teen should ever have to suffer.

Just kidding…you could say the most horrible thing ever and nullify it with "just kidding". Shit like this is likely to trigger PSTD from my alt-ed days.

…and I'm not fucking kidding.

comrad_darkness

oh my god, you have totally explained my insane college roommate. The one I went broke renting an apartment to get away from. Wow. Also reminded me of him after I'd totally forgotten. Well, painful insight I guess.

Limeylizzie

I am so using that next time some hood rat pushes me in the subway.

DaRooster

"As they say in politics…"? Do they really say that? You guy should find something more useful to do other than "tweet" your shit all about.#douchebag

freakishlywrong

If that hashtag isn't taken, it needs to be, STAT. #upfist.

KeepFnThatChicken

…he got caught doing this?! How the fuck do you get caught tweeting a bunch of nonsense from a fake account? Who cares enough to see you do this?

I mean, people tweet from freeways and bathrooms and dressing areas and sexytime and in chambers and during prayer and holy ghost revivals. HOW DID HE GET CAUGHT?!

MichelesPantalones

Given the kind of hateful shit he was tweeting, some offended person was undoubtedly keeping track of him.

EatsBabyDingos

Lil Eric in 5th grade:

Teacher: "Lil Eric, use 'disaster' in a sentence."

Lil Eric: "Lil Scotty Perry taught me to shove waterborn M-80's up people's butts, so when I shoved one up Sally's butt, it dis-assed her."

Anyone else noticing a trend with conservatives impersonating folks online to make ridiculous remarks because conservatives have no rebuttals based on reality?

glamourdammerung

Also, noting that this moron outed himself because he was too stupid to realize which Twitter account he was on.

James Michael Curley

Five pounds of Fehrnstrom in a three pound bag.

comrad_darkness

> if you want less spending and lower taxes then you're a terrorist

When the country is deep in three fucking wars, you damn well are.

James Michael Curley

OT – "Maine, Alaska, Oklahoma, Kentucky and Nevada, ranked at the top for divorces, while Utah, Wyoming and Arkansas – which had the highest marriage rates – were also higher than average in marital breakups. New Jersey, Connecticut, Massachusetts and New York ranked among the lowest in divorces."

That's because us libruls don't bother getting married — at least not for the first 10 years.

Negropolis

Which kind of means that the ones that do get married are for real about it. The best way to "protect marriage" is to delay it, obviously.

Biel_ze_Bubba

"if you can’t stand the tweet, get out of the kitchen.”

No, Eric, it's the TWIT we can't stand.

Doktor Zoom

The only Scott Brown tweet I want to read about is the one that says "Congratulations to Senator-Elect Warren."

Negropolis

Would he be so classy?

Limeylizzie

All I know is I am in the cone of uncertainty, so canned goods, warm drinks and nuts at my place this weekend.

Tundra Grifter

We have nuts at our place every weekend.

LiveToServeYa

Pointless. You can't make a fake Twitter account without it going amok and supporting Newt Gingrich.

DrinkYerBourbon

Who do you have to blow to post a comment around here?

ttommyunger

Not saying Scott is teh gay, but I'm betting he would hold one between his cheeks (upper or lower) 'till the swelling went down.

Callyson

“I promise to devote all my time in office to making gay videos. Shame on Scott Brown for focusing on jobs!”
Given the lack of success Scott Brown is having in his laser like focus on jobs, those gay videos don't sound so bad. Gay porn actors need to make a living too…