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11.10.2013

I’ll be the first to admit it. The ability to find a
perfectly shorn piece of spandex that actually makes my brain wake up and fire
the dusty synapse that says, “Damn, my butt looks GOOD,” is nothing short of a
miracle. Said pants are like a Renoir for my ass. A Monet for my derrière. In
the well-constructed, perfectly lit stage of a tiny wood laminate dressing
room, I’m not really sure if it’s me or my reflection in the slimming mirrors
that grabs for my plastic and charges $110 to a credit card as mindlessly as a
zombie walking down the street… all in the name of my ego and my behind.

But.

Come. ON.

I’m probably the 1,001st person to comment on
this week's more-than-odd commentary from the founder of one of the most iconic
yoga brands today. To say that his comments are offensive is an
understatement, and no, this isn't a blog about how I have decided to stop wearing my pants because of it (yet). But the issue at hand runs a good bit deeper than fabric
thinness and concentration of fabric boogers (otherwise known as pilling)
post-washing machine.

The pants, he says, fall short not because of their
construction, but because of the person wearing them.

And why this unassuming woman’s fault? Because her thighs
touch.

(insert “wtf.”)

Albeit this is a really stupid thing to have slip from your
mouth, as we saw last year with the outfall around Abercrombie (and let the record show, that little slip up cost them majorly). Like probably
95% of Americans (I’m making that number up), our thighs might actually touch,
no matter how tall or wide we are, even when we’re standing still. God forbid
we start actually moving - running, bending, jumping, or any of the other
things you can see a modeled in these ads doing - and woah… your perfectionist
pantalons wouldn’t know what hit them.

The filmed apology is worth some kudos. However, Mr. Wilson, when you
ask me and all the other women viewers to stand by you and help “prove that the
culture you have built cannot be chipped away,” I actually feel really sad.

You see, I like your pants just fine, but the culture is the problem. You are, as most
businessmen might be, concerned with the bottom line, and even more
differentiating between you and me is the simple fact that you are a man, so I
do not expect you to understand. But your culture is the one of never quite
there. Your culture is like the popular girl on the playground who knew your
pants came from Kmart and hers were Calvin Klein. It is the culture of skinny.
The culture of perfectionism. The culture of judgment. It is a fortress. It is
exhausting.

And, call me crazy, but it has ZERO to do with yoga.

You see, here’s what really happened for me standing in your
dressing room, as I prepared to de-virginize my closet with a pair of your
pants. In the past, any situation involving looking in the mirror would have given my imagination full-speed ahead permission to trick my eyes, and consequently my self-worth, into warping the image in front of me – ME –
into something resembling a stumpy ogre on steroids. The fact that I am 30
years old and just beginning to have a shopping experience that doesn’t end in
a shame spiral because of the overwhelming presence of a size-2 gremlin dressed
in Prada dancing on my shoulder telling me I’m too big… is ridiculous.

As someone who, like your company, has roots in
Perfectionism (with a big P), my overwhelming need to people please, fear of
being average (or worse, failure), and belief that I’m never quite there or never quite good enough
has starved my potential and at times my body to the point of destruction. It's probably something I'll always struggle with, but,
as any good perfectionist would, I pretend that’s not the case. Enough.

It’s taken years to find a chink in my armor, in to which
the message that I’m strong, healthy and beautiful as is could even have space
and path to sink in. Where did I finally find that crack? Yoga. My mat is my
place to pour out my imperfections, define my resiliency, test my limits. It
lets me see who I am in every moment more clearly, and choose if that’s who I
really want to be. And, as a woman, of
course I’d appreciate that I look “good” while I’m at it, thank you very
much.

So back to standing in the dressing room. You know what was there? Potential, oddly enough. I felt excitement to move, flow, run and
continue pushing this very vulnerable side of me who is still learning to love
herself and trust her strength. And that had everything to do with the
experiences and places and people I’d engage with through yoga… and nothing to
do with whether I'd achieved a thigh gap.

I am NOT saying that I am beyond thinking about my body image - that would be a big fat lie. But the last thing I need is the image of a thigh gap invading the personal space I've worked so hard to create on my yoga mat.

So really, I’d like to suggest that this culture, in fact, does need to be chipped away. Because the chips
at this particular culture actually let a little more personality, light and
color shine through.

If I could use all of me to change one thing in this world,
it would be to shift that part of every woman’s brain that is judging,
belittling, stealing her potential away, and telling her that she is not ___________
enough. Without all that, do you know what we’d probably see? A new generation
of women pushing their potential and kicking more ass than ever before… Because
they knew they couldn’t fail. Because they knew they were enough. Because they
knew they were beautiful.

We’d change the world. Could your pants handle that?

That’s the real opportunity here – for you, or for any other
clothing brand. Stand up to the test of women who are getting ready to blow the
roof off once we realize that we’re done being spoon-fed perfectionism. And if
you’re not up to it, I’ll happily take the thigh-touching owner of this plastic
card somewhere else.

(And last I checked, me and my lady friends, we make 80% of
consumer decisions in America. So there’s that.)

At the moment...

I fear numbness, stillness, lack of growth and a failure to serve the world around me. I love inspiration, peak experience, movement and synergy. I seek to "do things out of love, and not out of fear" - to compassionately move through my life recognizing struggle, cultivating passion and not run shrieking from experience when life is somewhere between the two.