My many mistakes hurt my heart. It is the mistake to care others yet others do not seek to understand me. Though some nice people encourage me to move forward, some even deters me from moving forward. Wish you all have good days and thank you.

Current upheaval life from inside and outside rubbed salt into my past pain and worsened it deeply. Thus, such feelings evokes and birthing out this poetry. Wish you all have good days and thank you for reading my poetry.

Drifting aimlessly
On the vast ocean
Ocean of life’s troubles
Ocean of woes
Floating around sorrowfully
Nowhere to go
Wondering
Feeling lonely
Hoping to find
A destination
An island
Island of team-ship rather than competition

Passing by many islands
Many islands reject after squeezing me
Give! Give! Give!
All these drain enthusiasm in me
Wearing me out
Where is the island?
The island of mutual understanding and respect
Not the dead sea island

Where is the island?
The island where I can rest
The island of mutual understanding and respect
The island of truthfulness
The island of complementing mutual needs

Whenever failed attempts of finding a full time job after having a child for more than three years, I feel downcast. Am I drifting aimlessly in my job search? I wish to support my parents financially. Whenever there is time, I surf the Internet at home and reply to emails and comments due to financial restriction. Some bosses squeezed me and refused to pay me the little income for the work I have done. Making excuses and even empty promises. Only consider their own interests without considering employees’ needs. These really kill my enthusiasm in my work. Don’t I need to eat? Can’t I earn a living? Their motto is their own benefit. When they want to train me, they say beautiful words.

When I was imagining people with multiple identities, three words were ringing in my head, “shrouded with mystery.” The next day, other words flowed out and revised. Finally, the first and second lines are added to explain the picture in my mind.