It's a blog. About my misfit dogs and how they (ruin) improve my life. And other things.

July 2016

July 12, 2016

My horse is a weirdo. It’s partly why I love her and partly why I want to tear out my hair on a weekly basis.

Here are things that would scare/spook/freak out the average horse, but at which my horse doesn’t bat an eye:Motorcycles Cars Large trash trucks All these above vehicles driving within 10 feet of her Cars/motorcycles backfiring Dirt bikes Cyclists riding within feet of her Strollers People running on trail or on the street Dogs barking at her Dogs rushing at her Fireworks Parades Walking in a parade, surrounded by parade Cell phone sounds Weird shadows Deer on trail (within feet of her) Blowing flags/tarps/sheets/etc.

Here are the things that will send her into such a nervous panic that she basically has a breakdown for a week and stops eating:The weather goes from hot to hotter The weather goes from cold to colder That gutter she walked over before now has a tiny bit of water in it That wind seems different Pretty sure that one thing right there wasn’t right there last time I was here. Monster. The horse that is normally to the left of me in his stall is now still only four feet from me, but not in his stall. The horse that is normally to the left of me in his stall is now still only four feet from me, but now he is in the arena. That other horse that is normally to the right of me in his stall is now still only four feet from me, but not in his stall. The horse that is normally to the right of me in his stall is now still only four feet from me, but now he is in the arena.

July 10, 2016

The corgi is getting up there in years. She's over 10 years old and she's starting to be even MORE pigheaded, as if that is even possible.

Here's a scenario that happens almost every night now before we go to bed. (I have translated all of Roxy's dirty looks into English for you. You're welcome.)

Me: Roxy, upstairs.

Roxy: Nope.

Me: Roxy. Now. Come.

Roxy: .... nah.

Me: ROXY. COME.

Roxy: (takes two steps up) This seems good.

Me: Yes, Roxy, you jerk. Two steps up the stairs has always been acceptable, except NO. Not ever. COME HERE NOW.

Roxy: (takes one more step) I'm done now. I'm such an obedient dog.

Me: ROXY! UP! STAIRS! NOW! COME! (Starts to come toward her.)

Roxy: (runs up stairs quickly so she doesn't get her ass kicked..... then stops before last step to throw me one more side eye.)

Me: OHMYGOD JUST COME NOW.

Roxy: Human, obviously I wanted to come upstairs because I am here now. (saunters up last step with confidence as high as ever.)

Here is a really cute photo of her when she was young so that I can see something redeeming about her. Because even writing this post makes me kind of hate her. Now I will go to bed and start this entire scenario. AGAIN.