How to Deal With An “Are We Exclusive?” Conversation Gone Wrong (Basically, Do the Opposite of What Happened on The Mindy Project)

So last night, just as Mindy was feeling like a princess after her guy cooked her a romantic (albeit, disgusting) dinner, things took a decidedly negative turn when she realized they were not on the same page about exclusivity in their relationship and also, her kitchen caught on fire. Yikes.

The face of a man who isn't ready to commit.

The reaction of the woman he won't commit too. I feel ya, Mindy.

You probably won't have to deal with the flaming panini makers, but here are some other reactions you probably should try to avoid if your guy doesn't want to "keep it zipped" for you over the holidays:

1. Don’t lie to your best friend, insult her husband, threaten to end your friendship, and then “borrow” her dress (without wearing underwear) because you’re in a bad mood. She probably won't stay sympathetic.

2. Don’t decide to seduce a guy you’ve already dated, who has a new girlfriend, out of spite towards your new guy and your best friend who just called you a mess.

3. Don’t get in a fist fight with said best friend after she catches you seducing the other guy.

The better solution? Calmly discuss why he doesn’t feel the same way. Determine whether his reasons are about timing or about you. If they’re about you, or his feelings about commitment in general, you probably need to cut your losses. (Note: Do NOT expect that he’ll change his mind a day later like Josh did here. This is a TV show, not real life.) If his reasons make sense, decide if you can live with the fact that he’s not ready yet, and for how long. Then revisit the topic after an appropriate amount of time and if he’s still not there and you aren’t cool with being non-exclusive, it’s time to move on.

But that would make for much less hilarious TV hijinks.

Have you ever had the exclusivity talk with a guy only to find out he wasn’t on the same page? How did you handle it? Have you ever had a man who wanted to be exclusive when you didn’t?