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I’m sure we have all had that moment when we’ve asked ourselves or someone asked us that, “if you could go to back in time and change something, what would you change?” Some said “I wish I had dated that guy/girl” others said “I wish I actually paid attention in class”. They were a few who even said they wished they had a better sense of style.
I often wonder what I would change if I had to go back in time. Would I dare go out with a guy, pay attention to math’s class, or get rid of that hideous ponytail of mine. Try harder to get into medical school or not be so straight forward.
The answer would be NO. I wouldn’t change anything. Not even that lie I once told my parents which they later found out about. You know why? Cause I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for those moments. True, some of those moments were traumatic and left a scar. But if it wasn’t for those moment I would be the person I am today. Realistic. A girl who found out at a young but right age that life isn’t the fairy tales we hear about. A teenager who found out that relationship isn’t all there is in the world. A lady who found realized that when God closes a door he opens another. A human, who understood that our past is the foundation to our future. Sure, we had some bumps and pressure on the way. But that’s what made us stronger. Having a good foundation is what makes the whole structure steady.
And what made my foundation strong is my parents. May God grant them a long healthy life. And I hope to repay them back. Pay them back for showing me all the secret and hidden treasures of life. Love you and miss you both.

I loved the concept of zombies.How many movies and series have we seen over the years that have something to do with zombies?!? I, personally, watched each and every one of them.
But recently, I’ve been giving it some thought. What are zombies? Zombies are those humans which aren’t humans anymore. They are creatures. Dead, yet very much living. All they do is walk and run around trying to fulfil for desire. Ruining everything and anything that gets in their way. They just NEED to have it. At times, they get what they wanted, look over, find something better and go after that instead. Leaving what they wanted so badly before, out in the open.
And I realized, we don’t need any virus or any experiment gone wrong to turn us into zombies. All we need is an ugly desire, a thing that we just need to have. Something that we would go to any extend to get.And BAM, there you go. We are zombies. We won’t need any sleep or have any emotions. All we will care about is having what we desire. Actually, we don’t even need a desire. just make a noise or cause a drama. It might not have anything to do with us or our life, but don’t worry, we will come looking at it, come as fast as we can. Run towards it like our life depends on it.
And whats worse, we won’t need a bite or a scratch.We all have it in us. We are all infected. You don’t have to wait any more, the zombie apocalypse is already upon us. So, BEWARE!

A rich man who has all the worldly possessions will always have a lock on his door and in his life. He may have friends, these friends that are there for him or just for his worldly belongings, he may not know. He will always have the fear of being robbed. He may have everything but he will always live in fear. Fear of being betrayed or double crossed. He will always be on the lookout for security. Always working to make sure he has the possessions due to which he has friends.

Where as a poor man, he may not have everything but he knows that he doesn’t have the possessions that people desire or what people may commit crimes to achieve. He will sleep with all the locks open in his house. He knows that the friends he has are true to him. He has nothing to give to them yet they chose to be friends with him. He is happy as he is and he should be. He will help others because he knows he has nothing to lose.

What I mean by all this is that we humans, throughout our life, work our asses off to gain the perfect life we desire. Once we get up there, and we are friends with people with high status as ours, we will have to always work to maintain that status and that level. After we get up there, we will start living in constant fear for our belongings and be very possessive. Some of us, who are strong enough, might start helping others. But most of us, will feel threatened every time someone asks us for help. We will fear that if we help this person we might not have as much as we do now and our overall possessions might reduce. We fear that if we help them once they will come again.

What we need to sit and think about is that is it all worth it? We leave our family, our true friends and run behind that perfect life. Is that perfect life worth the tension and the worry? To always have the constant need to be on top? We may have the safest house in town, but if you don’t feel safe then what is the point? You may have the most comfortable bed in the world, but if you can’t sleep peacefully then what IS the point? Seeing it this way, the perfect life doesn’t seem so perfect , does it?

WANTS! It has always been there in our life. We have it, our parents have it and probably theirs did too. Be it small or big. We all have them. There are wants to be rich, famous, pretty, and sexy whereas some just want to be happy. Some more than the other but it’s there.

Wants are a great thing to have. Every night before we go to bed, we imagine scenarios in which we achieve what we want. The next morning when we wake up, we wake up to the thought that today might be a day closer to our achievement. They help give us that push, that passion or the drive that is required for us humans to achieve our goals. But that’s all they should be. Nothing more and nothing less.

Sometimes, wanting something too much or having too many wants may lead to depression. Whether we achieve what we want or not, it tends to leave a hole inside of us. This hole might as well be the black hole or the fire-y pits of hell because it will never be satisfied and it’ll never be full, No matter what we do and what we achieve. If we get what we wanted, we will always want more and if we don’t get what we wanted, it will affect our self esteem.

I’m not saying that we should stop having goals and ambition altogether. All I’m saying is that that’s all they should be, a means to let us live to our full potential. Have goals but at the same time appreciate what you have, no matter how less it may be. What you may have now might be someone’s “all I want”.

Lay your happiness in what you have and not what you want cause if that happens, then my friend, Its never going to be enough.

All my life, all I ever wanted was to be the girl everyone loved. Be the girl that everyone knew and praised. Be the girl that when asked of, people would say “O she, yeah she is a awesome person”

In my early high school years, I changed a lot of friends. I was with the giggling girls who practically giggled at anything and everything. I’d laugh along cause, duh, I need them as friends. Then there were the boys. I was all about playing football and riding my bike. That didn’t last cause, umm, puberty. (Also, talking to boys was looked upon as a crime bigger than murder). This was followed by the judgmental girls, the ones who would stand at the corner of the ground at lunch and judge anyone in sight. There were the “crush on teacher girls” ,the “unsatisfied rich girls”. I could go on and on but I guess you got the picture.

One thing that was common in all of this was the fact that they all didn’t last. And I always wondered why. I mean I was happy that I had so many friends but something was amiss and I didn’t know what. I started thinking that maybe it was me. Maybe I’m just ungrateful for that fact that I have friends. Then I realized that it wasn’t me. How can it be me when I haven’t been myself with all of my friends? I’d change myself to their liking just so I to be friends with them and never gave it a go with my actual self. I was FAKE and i needed to change that.

So I decided that I put this theory to test and undoubtedly a few months later people did genuinely like me. I had my jokes with the giggling girls, I had my games with the boys (not as much as I would have liked, but O well). There were haters undoubtedly, I mean the judgmental girls and I never got along, but O well, they judged me I judged them. It was all good!!

I guess, I had climbed the first step to happiness. It was something the laziest one among us can do and that was to just BE YOU. The right ones, the ones who really matter WILL love you but only and only if you are your true self. 🙂