Pages

These Two Years

For last 2 years, I can’t enjoy the habit/ritual for
visiting families in Eid due to my pregnancy and Hayu still too small to go to
long journey. So this year I went there. I did unjung-unjung.

I think it won’t be matter, to skip 2 years in a row
visiting relatives at their home.

But I was wrong.

I felt holes in heart, seeing my uncle looks weary and tired
after surgery he had. Another uncle already reduced his work in field, because
of his lacking energy. My aunt nearly in tears, just because I said okay to
bring her cooking to home. Everything’s change. And those 2 years just like a
fast forward button that I unintendedly pushed, not knowing that I’ll missed so
much and feeling lost afterward.

I feel so guilty, for being busy to grow up by myself and
forget how my beloved families are getting older too.

Let’s not forgetful and let our guards down even for a
while. I’ll say “I love you” so much as I can. I’ll say “I miss you” as much as
I could. I’ll call them as soon as possible, not waiting the ritual, not
expecting the habit.

Because now I realize how much I’ll long them when they
slip from my hands.