The Chimes’ marital tragedies

Of all the horrible consequences of the Chime and wife saga, its impact on marriage and traditions is the most devastating. For over one week, the world has been treated to unsavoury accounts of Mrs Clara Chime’s marital battles with her husband, Enugu State Governor Sullivan Chime. At a time we were left to imagine what happened inside and also outside the Enugu Government House apartment to which the governor’s wife was restricted for medical reasons, according to the governor, or where she was detained, according to her. We have heard from the governor that his wife has mental challenges requiring medical seclusion, but the lady in question has countered that she is only suffering from depression, and not madness as the world was led to believe.

The battle has attracted all sorts of attention, from the local to the international stage. The home media has been feasting on it. A notable lawyer has been briefed. Local artistes and civil society groups have picked it up, seeking justice for Mrs Chime. International organs may also have been informed of the ordeal of a certain state governor’s wife at the hands of her husband. Security personnel are deeply involved, if only to do the bidding of their master. The folks, especially the traditional ruler, of Ozulobu community, Amuda, Umunneoche Local Council of Abia State, Mrs Chime’s hometown, have also heard it.

We have equally heard that the governor and his security team have, at least once, tried to ship Clara back to her mother in an Enugu estate but failing to see the woman to whom to hand her over, they thought it was better to return her to the restricted apartment in Government House until the time was right. Then, we heard that the right time came a few days ago when Mrs Chime was successfully handed back to her mother, but there soon came another report that Clara has moved to Port Harcourt amid comments that she has finally been freed.

That was quite an ordeal, not just for the woman but also for her husband. Nothing in the saga lifted her profile, nor could anything in it lend Mr Chime to any hearts. It did grave harm to Mrs Chime, who four years ago ascended the celebrity ladder when she married the love of her life and moved into Government House. When her image graced the pages of the newspaper, it was that of a beautiful woman, graceful in that cocky gele headgear with which our female celebrities make a statement or two. When she was shipped out a few days ago, she may have shaken off the shackles of the Government House, but indeed she was leaving a shrunken woman, toppled from the heights of power to the ordinariness of daily living.

As for her husband, few things can lower a man before humanity. It may still be common for a man to see off his wife and take another woman to replace her but something dies in such a man, even if sycophants may whisper in his ear saying all is well. Such good-for-nothing companions may tell their misguided friend that there is nothing to be ashamed of and that indeed people can marry today and divorce tomorrow. Celebrities of all stripes have turned marriage and divorce into a queer art. Some sound a bit boastful when they say they have married seven times and divorced as many times. Today I say I do, tomorrow I say I don’t. At Chime’s privileged heights, women can be a dime a dozen, but when a man begins to inflate his lungs with such airs, doom is around the corner.

As damaging as the ordeal is to Mr and Mrs Chime, the marriage institution and our traditions are the worst hit. What is happening in Enugu is the most devastating assault on marriage. It more than mocks matrimony. It ridicules love and questions marital union because as Clara departs, it is not apparent that anything has irredeemably broken the codes of their matrimony. I do not suggest that there are no difficulties in marriage. There are, and some may take the grace of God to resolve. But in the Chimes’ case, all that we heard is Clara’s mental challenge for which her parents should find a cure, as the governor reportedly said. Mrs Chime herself has said her problem is depression. Now, whether the problem is mental or merely prolonged sadness, lingering low self-esteem or loss of interest in what once made Clara happy, restraining her or sending her away is not the answer. What caused her problems in the first place? The unwritten code of matrimony demands that the couple sort out what has crept in to rob them of their joy. If it required the best doctors, psychologists, therapists or counsellors in the world, it was within the Chimes’ means to find an answer to whatever troubled Clara. When the love-struck Sullivan held his bride’s hand as they faced the priest, they heard something similar. They were told that neither sickness of the mind nor of body should warrant a separation. They were also told that poverty should not drive them apart. Nor should wealth of which they have plenty. The officiating elders at their traditional marriage would also expect that much from the couple. More so because they were not just another couple; they were the first family of the state. Everyone looked up to them to lead the way. To a large extent, they were the moral compass of Enugu by virtue of their position.

Traditions expect that couples quietly work hard at their challenges, and should not launder their messy linen in public. Part of the burdens of public office is that the officers should labour to be above board. They fail sometimes, and that can be understood, but such brazen assault of matrimony as illustrated by the Chime’s marital tragedy is way outside the permissible.

Divorce grounds are rare in Christianity; even then there were none in the Chimes’ case. The traditional setting may be more permissible but what steps did Chime take to meet the requirements, if indeed he and Clara have gone their separate ways?

Their four-year-old marriage, stormy as it apparently was, produced a son, who, according to reports, is staying with the father, rather than the mother, as the former wished. As the boy grows up, he sure will ask questions. The father had better prepare to answer them.