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Saturday, October 22, 2011

You’re so cold, so invariably cold,
You’re tired of disappointment,
Tired of feeling lost without a hope,
Doesn’t anyone understand?
You’re so lonely, so horribly lonely,
You’ve wasted so much of your time,
Time you wish you’d never given,
Oh how you wish you could take it all back.
You feel sick, so incurably sick,
Your stomach twisting painfully,
Everything reminds you vividly of them,
Why would God play this cruel trick?
You’re so sad, so terribly sad,
You wish you could feel happy,
Where did all the hours go?
You miss the time when you were whole.

Friday, October 14, 2011

What if I like you so much I'm afraid to pray?
Because I'm afraid my answer will be different from His.
What if I like you so much that I want you here to stay?
Because you understand me, you love me, you don't play silly tricks.
What if I'm too attached to let you go?
What will I do when you finally move on?
I don't want to learn, don't want to grow,
From a pain that will last, a pain that's so wrong.
I feel too much too soon for anyone who cares,
I plug my ears to block out the sound,
Somebody save me from this fresh bout of tears,
But sadly, as always, he's the only one around.

I hate that feeling when my stomach falls again.
I knew it would happen, but I hoped it wouldn’t be him.
Why is my mind mixed up with so many things?
It’s all there, but it’s him who I see.
He sits there and looks at me, a growing pleasure,
Of torturing, you know I’ll never know for sure.
What does he actually think of me inside his head?
Does he know how I’ve felt, what I did?
How I sacrificed so much to talk to him?
How I kept his secrets, his passions, his fibs?
I'm too close, too confused to make a guess,
So maybe I should step back to see the rest.