Contrast Is King

“First I saw the two barking rats, then I saw the guy walking them. Talk about an odd pairing! The dude had tattoos on his skull, and looked tough. Not like the herb or homo I thought he would be. And there he is, with two runty toy dogs. One of the dogs walked like it had a cucumber up its ass.”

This is an excellent example of someone defying expectations. Does anyone doubt this dude gets laid like gangbusters? I bet his idea of a brothel is the local dog park. And he pays in cloyingly cute toy poodle dollars.

I’ve written before about how important contrast is to your game. Contrast, like its social dynamics cousins vulnerability game and being unpredictable, is a status signal of alphaness. When women see a man defy convention, or wantonly fuck around with societal expectation, they think “Oh, he must be an alpha, because only an alpha could risk stepping out of line like that.” Or when they hear a man reveal a potentially status damaging vulnerability at odds with his image of strength, they think “He must be really alpha to confess his fear of parrots.”

No, seriously, that’s the way women think. Subconsciously, at least.

Contrast game is also a variety of handicap game, a powerful technique for subcommunicating genetic superiority. Like bright, heavy plumage on a peacock, tattoos signal that a man is so genetically fit (and symmetrical) that he can afford the risk to his health and looks that getting inked with needles will mean for him. Skull tattoo dude in the above photo actually has a double handicap whammy advertising his alpha genetic fitness — he’s enduring both the disfigurement of tattoos *and* the public humiliation of walking two gay ass pooches. (I bet he’s telling the other dude to be careful where he steps.)

How powerful a psychological mindfuck is contrast? Two words:

Susan Boyle.

That ugly broad got on stage and, in the teeth of a hostile, pitying audience, sang the shit out of “I Dreamed A Dream”. Result? Standing ovation, tears flowing like a river, and eight million copies of her debut album sold in the first six weeks. For a more recent example of the contrast phenomenon, check out this video of Janey Cutler, the 80 year old singer who elicits the same reaction from an audience expecting something entirely different.

That, my friends, is the awesome power of contrast. Now imagine what it can do for your notch count.

So, you ask, how do I translate this theme of contrast into practical game advice? I can offer a few suggestions.

If you’re meeting a girl for a dinner after work, and you’re in a business suit, take her to your favorite dive bar or hipster joint after the dinner. She’ll be pleasantly surprised that a professional such as yourself feels just at home in a dump as in a fancy restaurant. (Note: You really shouldn’t be taking girls you haven’t fucked to fancy restaurants.)

Does she think your political views are antiquated? Good. Now take her out to a progressive-oriented art show filled with pseudointellectual revolutionary crackpots. She’ll start to wonder what else about you she doesn’t know.

Speak streetwise, but occasionally drop a big word in your conversation. Intellectual dominance is to smart chicks like physical dominance is to prole chicks.

If you’re a very masculine man, peacock with a feminine accessory, like an ornate bracelet or an earring. If you’re naturally foppish, try wearing masculine accessories, like a big honking watch or combat boots.

Approach a girl like a typical beta, asking her innocuous questions about how she likes living in the city. Once you have lulled her into an anhedonic stupor, hit her with a neg. Consider her look of surprise a step closer to intimacy.

Did you meet a girl online and tell her about your starched shirt job? Then show up to the date wearing something boldly stylish. Her mind will race with thoughts of a secret life you’re hiding from her.

Similarly, if you’re a suit-wearing type of guy, a well-placed tattoo on the inner forearm can do wonders to stir excitement. Just manufacture an excuse to roll up your sleeves, and watch her eyes light up.

Regale her with adventure stories that are completely at odds with her image of you. For instance, if you’re an accountant, mention the time you spent in the Congo with the little-known aid group Accountants Without Borders, and how you budgeted the goats for the local village.

Talk about how you voted for George Bush, then give a buck to a homeless bum you happen to pass by while walking with her. (Alternatively, you could reverse this sequence if you want to crush the girl’s hopes. After sucking up to her no-doubt SWPLian worldview, offhandedly announce after sex how you recently joined the NRA “to get some shootin’ practice for the big game animals you like to hunt”.)

Contrast is the reason why ugly guys can sometimes do better with women than handsome guys. A handsome man is expected to have his act together in all other ways; in comparison, nothing much is expected of ugly men. So an ugly man who spits tight game will pleasantly surprise a woman while a good looking man with game will simply confirm what she already believed to be true. And when it comes to making an impression on women, which man do you think she’ll remember more? That’s right, the man who surprised her out of her lazy thinking.

All humans want to be fascinated. Kurt Cobain had it right — here we are now, entertain us. Men are entertained by tits, ass and face. Women are entertained by male charisma and psychosocial savviness. They want to be kept on their toes, forever wondering what kind of man you are. Defying a woman’s expectations is the equivalent of a big-boobed woman taking off her sweater and shoving her cleavage in a man’s face. Her fond memory of you will linger well into the next day.

Approach a girl like a typical beta, asking her innocuous questions about how she likes living in the city. Once you have lulled her into an anhedonic stupor, hit her with a neg. Consider her look of surprise a step closer to intimacy

Have you done this?! I never thought of this. I do a lot of this type of game, but that seems like a powerful move.

the comments above demonstrate how differnent men and women really are. we can all agree that tattoos function as a signal. maybe they signal “i did a stretch for slinging meth and got this ink when i made my bones in the aryan brotherhood” or maybe they signal “sigh, i have no patience for the bourgois lifestyle. i have to live for my art… at least until my trust fund gets low.” either way it’s a signal against conformity.

a man looks at that guy and wants to know more. is he an outlaw biker or a hipster poser? women, on the other hand, don’t really care what the signal means. they only care about the signal.

if you want to attract women, don’t spend too much time thinking about the deeper meaning of something. just try it and see if it works for you. don’t overthink it, cause i guarantee women won’t. in fact, most women prefer not to dig too deep and let these things remain a mystery. at least until you get into a relaitonship, at which point she will do everything in her power to undermine and interrogate your signals in order to get you to reveal your true nature.

Tattoos are for try hards and ‘tards. If you really want to excite her as you roll up your sleeve, make sure your guns are loaded. A cut physique sends a stronger message then some bullshit tribal squiggle.

Oh… and the bit about the NRA is legit, and specifically with contrast. It’s not something women expect from a white collar guy. Maybe it’s more of a novelty thing here in Canada, but I can instantly smell the pussy get wet when I casually drop that I spent the morning at the range. This is especially effective with the vegan/SWPL ‘guns are bad’ chicks. Go figure.

I’m not a tough looking guy, but what kinda power move is asking a weirdo with a hot chick what amazing shit he does?
obviously they’ll inquire and ill just explain that shit and ask if he works for west coast choppers or some shit.
shit.

Tattoos and piercings aren’t shit unless they were done by a ghetto banger/biker/neo-nazi in jail with a hot rusty nail or adapted writing pen/syringe. Also anything tribal and anything colourful is a big no no.

That guy in the photo has way too many colour tattoos to be a badass, dull black/grey/blue only thanx.

Tattoos on guys will excite a lot of women, but you’d better choose your tats really carefully because a stupid or gross or badly-executed one will be counterproductive when looking for a LTR.

Also, tattoos that are not coverable by ordinary shirts and pants have a very positive impact if you have a good job but a very negative impact if you don’t (one way you are so good they have to have you despite your nonconformity, the other way you are a bonehead with no ability to be socially high-functioning).

Overall, tattoos are very alpha simply because they show bravery — you are making a permanent decision. The downside is they can easily be a permanent demonstration of your bad qualities. (Temporary tattoos for gaming purposes are an underappreciated technique.)

Tattoos on girls must be interpreted in the girl’s social context. They can mean very different things, although their presence always indicates more sexual readiness than their absence. Girls like to be complimented on their tattoos, and you can ask to touch one; I suspect a neg of a tattoo is a more dangerous move than other negs. A tramp stamp (random-looking design on lower back) is much sluttier than other tattoos. A girl with no tattoos at all when everyone she hangs out with has them is almost certainly not a slut and is potential LTR material. If a girl is from a very conservative environment, one tiny tattoo means more than a square foot of tattoos on a prole girl. If a girl has no tattoos and you can persuade her to get a tattoo with you, no matter how small and hidden, you are winning big.

Nice post!
Good example: I know a crazy contrast guy, he is a fireman, medical dr and police at once, he has adrenaline enough for ten guys, whenever there is anything happening he is there. He travels the world, especially complicated dangerous areas where he can help out.
Once he came into the hospital with bullet proof jacket and fully armed, went into the dr’s room, changed and came out in white coat and asked, -who is next? The fully filled patient waiting room suddenly turned half empty..
Look wise, the guy is tall and strong, but not overly muscular like those that goes to the gym or having gynecomastia surgery,,,, you can see he is the natural kind, he doesnt care what about brands or newest hippest things, at work he is a pain to many of his colleagues because he dares to challenge them, but no one can fire him as he is a smartass that knows that his knowledge is why he can act this way and he has many haters but is also admired by many, The guy is completely surreal and i am mesmerized by him of course.

It’s kind of surprising to see the variety of guys walking around tiny pups. I usually figure it’s their girlfriend/wife’s lol. Even if they look bad@$$… in fact I figure even more that’s what going on.

Most of my recently married (or newly cohabiting) gfs end up getting cutesy dogs… often from their man! Always thought guys don’t like puppies, they want big manly dogs that will protect the house and stuff. So it’s weird.

Maybe it’s meant as a ‘trainer’ in preparation for babies. Some of these girls are very femmy and traditional, doing the whole housewifey thing so maybe the guys think the puppy will keep her company… it’s almost like a little mama+baby puppy, and that’s kind of endearing I imagine.

@montzilla
“Kind of like the “bad ass” banker biker.”

I knew a girl coupla years ago who’d brag about dating an ibanker who was also *in a rock band.* Like it was a prize equivalent in status to the Nobel. Like his being in a rock band made up for his being in an office job (that pulled in the big bucks, which girl doesn’t like that).

By the way, by puppy I mean small dog… the types of dogs that stay puppy size for life!

Also, guy walking a cute and friendly dog has got to be the #1 easy icebreaker. A guy could be a dork, by average, be a little off… but if he has a cute dog, it’s aight :-)

I have seen many many girls fawn over a guy’s adorable sprightly dog… do it myself too. It’s funny to see how the guy you’re actually with reacts when you’re basically enable a random man+dog to AMOG for a bit, hehe.

All stellar tips as usual–except I’m not so sure about “approach her like a beta and then surprise her.” You might have to trap her in a corner somewhere to make it work, because in my case at least, if a guy comes up to me and starts asking “where are you from” and “what do you do” questions (i.e. boringest conversation in the world), I’m immediately looking for an excuse to escape.

You don’t have to start out like an uninteresting beta in order to surprise me later, because I’m already expecting you to approach me with those dumb questions. Start out with something interesting and I’ll be surprised and pleased right off the bat.

“I know a crazy contrast guy, he is a fireman, medical dr and police at once, he has adrenaline enough for ten guys… Look wise, the guy is tall and strong, but not overly muscular like those that goes to the gym,,,, you can see he is the natural kind, he doesnt care what about brands or newest hippest things, at work he is a pain to many of his colleagues because he dares to challenge them, but no one can fire him… The guy is completely surreal and i am mesmerized by him of course.”

“You don’t have to start out like an uninteresting beta in order to surprise me later, because I’m already expecting you to approach me with those dumb questions. Start out with something interesting and I’ll be surprised and pleased right off the bat.”

Eh, fuck you Jane. Me Tarzan.

Women leave the most useless comments. Who cares if you’re “surprised and pleased”? The guys that are the most concerned with surprising & pleasing random girls are the guys whose dicks are drier than the Sahara.

All stellar tips as usual–except I’m not so sure about “approach her like a beta and then surprise her.” You might have to trap her in a corner somewhere to make it work, because in my case at least, if a guy comes up to me and starts asking “where are you from” and “what do you do” questions (i.e. boringest conversation in the world), I’m immediately looking for an excuse to escape.

I had just the same reaction to that one. I agree it likely won’t work unless the guy has previously seemed alpha to her. E.g. if she’s seen him quickly get the interest of another hot girl in the joint, or knows of him by reputation, that could be different.

Still the beta shouldn’t be boring beta. It should be comfort building “beta”. E.g. he just launches into an interesting story as though he’s already somewhat hooked you.

“I have seen many many girls fawn over a guy’s adorable sprightly dog… do it myself too. It’s funny to see how the guy you’re actually with reacts when you’re basically enable a random man+dog to AMOG for a bit, hehe.”

^ Great example of how chicks are always CONSCIOUSLY trying to fuck with a guy’s head by flirting with random dudes.

If you have a GF, make sure to flirt with other chicks in public, smell like perfume, make small comments about her friends/sisters, fuck around, etc.

Unless you have a great rack or can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, shut the fuck up and go make me a sammich.

@Polymath,

Agreed. If you’re gonna sport some tats, you better have some lean muscle mass to go along with it. If you have moobs (manboobs) or in any way resemble a pillsbury doughboy, forget about it. Tats won’t hide the fact a dweeb is a dweeb.

For a very large segment of women, tattoos are dead sexy. And no, it’s not because “criminals have them”; what kind of retarded reason is that? For most women of my acquaintance, tattoos are sexy because rock stars have them. It’s a sign of your nonconformity/rebelliousness. Also, they look cool.

Also, tattoo dog dude is a bad example of contrast. With the glasses and the non-thuggish face, he strikes me as a standard-issue Artistic Nonconformist type. He probably votes Democratic, paints/plays in a rock band/writes/works in a coffee shop while talking about how he’ll do one of the above, might be good at science, and gets far more pussy than any of the people above who condemned him as beta.

Personally, I wouldn’t fuck tattoo dog dude; shaved heads are disgusting. But if he grew his hair out I’d hit that.

Could you comment on the Lawrence Taylor thing? How is it that one of the greatest football players of all time, surely a supreme alpha, had to hire some hooker, never mind her age. How is he not swimming in free pussy? I find this simply amazing.

It’s kind of surprising to see the variety of guys walking around tiny pups. I usually figure it’s their girlfriend/wife’s lol. Even if they look bad@$$… in fact I figure even more that’s what going on.

A lot of it’s city living.

Small dogs are much more practical in an apartment or loft. Still some small dogs are way more twee than others. Dachshunds don’t seem gay; chiwawas and toy poodles do.

hey, but I know some people like this guy and, even with the tatoos, they are extremely betacore. Girls only think they are “good friends” and “help with the dogs when I’m travelling”. Tatoos are very common nowadays, everybody, even omegas, have them. The same goes with the poodles.

I strongly disagree with cobragirl (who for sure is going commando right now) about the sexyness of tatoos: I know some very hot women that only like them on alpha guys. So, it’s the tatooed, not the tatoo.

In this case your photo example is monotone, betatone, United Colours of Betatton, until second notice.

And in this case cobragirl is really nonconformist/rebellious about her underwear.

I agree that tats are far less transgressive than they used to be – in my youth they were exclusively for Hells Angels and inmates, whereas today many suburban teenage girls get them. High poser factor too. One really hopes that this trend has jumped the proverbial shark, and that the next generation steers away from the tramp stamps and inked skulls.

However, not sure that the dog-walking dude is a Starbucks poser-hipster: the full-sleeves and shaved skull are too much of a badass marker for the hipsters, who are skinnier, wimpier, and artier.

dragnet (props dude: your posts are great) had it right – but it’s deeper: contrast is sort of lifestlye push-pull, as opposed to short-term behavioral push-pull. It’s more than, and different than, being well rounded: it’s the unexpected out-of-place element that makes surprising and effective.

problem is, incongruent lifestyle choices may be effective in turning chicks on and picking them up, but they may not be so good for your professional or community image – depending, of course, on your profession or community. I guess the bottom line has to be, don’t adopt any major life habit, take on any risk-seeking behaviors, or make any major decisions (ex: full sleeve) *just* to improve your game, but only if it’s something you really want or need to do. the alternative is poserdom, and we all know how well posers do with women.

“Could you comment on the Lawrence Taylor thing? How is it that one of the greatest football players of all time, surely a supreme alpha, had to hire some hooker, never mind her age. How is he not swimming in free pussy? I find this simply amazing.”

Athletes hire hookers all the time. See Tiger Woods.

They get lazy and don’t want to go out to a club and pay few thousand for a table and wait for girls to come for them. It’s 2 am Monday night and they’re horny. It’s easy for them to pick up the phone and drop some change for pussy.

Pussy to a rich athlete is like toilet paper: Sometimes you get it free from a public restroom or you buy it the store; it doesn’t really matter where or how you get it as long as you’ve got some when you need it.

Plus, LT has been out of the limelight for years. Fame, like chicks, is fickle. Out of sight, out of mind.

Forget about owning a dog. If you have the alpha/high testosterone indicators of height, digit-ratio, brow, jaw, hip-waist ratio — in other words, if you don’t need to compensate for a lack of outward manliness by having a dog — then get a cat. Moreover, cohabitation with the feline nature is an excellent schooling in how to successfully master the no less mercurial and capricious feminine nature.

Who cares what you think? For all we know you’re a snaggle-toothed pillow-biter from Wisconsin. (Not that there is anything wrong with Wisconsin). If you’re not an 8 or above, kindly shut the fuck up. In fact, I’m not calling you cobragirl. From now on you’ll be known as sandwichgirl. “Hey sandwich girl, go fetch me a beer”.

Anon, I disagree. Why on earth would you need a hooker if you are Tiger Woods? It means you are really a B E T A in disguise! Hookers are boring and are meant for the super-lazy kind of guy. I mean, If you are tiger woods you don’t need to pay for tables and drinks to get girls… you just choose and go… easy.

Anon, I disagree. Why on earth would you need a hooker if you are Tiger Woods?

You are just gonna have to adjust your worldview if you want it to be at all accurate, to realize that solidly alpha guys, particularly married ones, do sometimes see hookers. Some of the explanations above have been good.

For one thing when a famous buff alpha, or just an in shape strong guy that exudes alpha confidence sees certain types of even American hookers, she very often gets WAY more into it than you imagine. That’s particularly true when there’s an established flirtation that happens first in his choosing her. Many hookers do really get fully into sex with some of their clients. Not with others or most.

Tattoos are officially ghey as a bag o’ butterflies- unless they are from a combat unit from past wartime service or done in prison.

Now having lived in DC in the past, the contrast thing does work in spades. Three times I took super lib, bunny hugger chicks for “long drives in the country”. Where I then proceded to pull up to a private gun range and pull out some choice weaponry.

Nothing shocked the shit out of them more than starting the day in an effete DC coffee house, then shooting a .308 with an odd tracer round thrown in that afternoon.

One was horrifed and quickly dropped out of the picture, the other two blew me on the drive back. Better than Ted Williams’ batting avergae for damn sure.

A masculine man with a child is the ultimate contrast game. When baby sitting a niece, nephew, or god child…Head over to the coffee shop, shopping district, or other place women congregate. It’s insane.

Plus, if your contrast is solid, it gives women an excuse to open you up. Giving women a chance to open is an aspect of game overlooked. They’ll ask about the kid. You mention it’s your god child, but then run beta provider game. “I just love kids so much and can’t wait to start a family of my own.”

Painting my nails black always works as contrast game. I have traditionally masculine features, so women will usually comment on them. If I just looked “normal,” they wouldn’t have anything to say.

So contrast game is effective because contrast is powerful. It’s also effective because it gives women something to open you about.

fuck. point well taken on contrast, but sometimes I think women are so fickle that they create the contrast in their heads without your even working on it. kind of like that seinfeld when george never goes downtown but somehow the job gets done.

i’ve seen ‘tiny dog walking dude’ – seems to be part of the urban swpl ecosystem these days. these are guys i never can quite place in terms of their station in life. is he a bartender, a sound tech, graphic designer, office drone. therein lies the utility, of course.

None of the guy’s tats are prison- or gang-related. He doesn’t have any spider webs on his elbows. No SS bolts. No “81,” or 1% or anything like that.

If you get into fights, you need to learn expertise over tattoos. I’d have no trouble pounding him out, but if he had anything noted above, he could get away with about anything other than kicking my dog. Because even if you win the fight, it won’t be the least you see of him (and his five brothers). Then again, legit 1% guys are cool enough if you show respect. You’d have to really act the fool to get into it with one of them.

My conclusion: He’s a bike messenger. Which means he’d have no problems hitting you over the head with a bike lock or beer bottle. They might not look like much, but most of the white-collar betas popping off would be on the ground before knowing what happened.

What bike messengers lack in size, they make up for in aggression and tenacity. Plus, he who punches first usually wins.

Most of life is drudgery and boredom. Men escape this through hobbies like golf, and video games.

Women seek to escape the futility of existence through seduction.

Seduction requires mystery, uncertainty, danger. I can look at the guy and know the only danger he presents is the e. coli under his grubby finger nails – and the likelihood that he has mouth herpes. Most women can’t.

He *seems* dangerous, and that is all that matters. Thus, he wins and the haters lose.

“Talk about how you voted for George Bush, then give a buck to a homeless bum you happen to pass by while walking with her. (Alternatively, you could reverse this sequence if you want to crush the girl’s hopes. After sucking up to her no-doubt SWPLian worldview, offhandedly announce after sex how you recently joined the NRA “to get some shootin’ practice for the big game animals you like to hunt”.)”

Conservatives are more likely to give their own money to charity than liberals. Liberals are more likely to give other people’s money to charity.

I just don’t see it… but maybe its just me. I see the flirting, it can be nice like with any other girl, ok. But having to pay directly for it gives me the bore. For her to leave? Some won’t, you’ll have to tell her to. Some will even call the next day from a different number. Some will even ask if they can come live with you.

But maybe can be fun if you like to also have that kind of power (money power) over a girl. But I just don’t see it, personally.

And, please, “some hookers get really into sex”…? Its just the same statistically with other girls, so why choose a hooker?

Becauseit’s an easier option, a professional relationship — my whole point. But that just gives me the bore. I like the thrill of the whole entanglement with non-professional girls.

But that’s just me, old Jesus. I don’t know what drives all of you lazy, wealthy and alpha-famous chaps out there.

SWPL chicks are so inundated, immersed, whatever in their stereotyping of those who disagree with them, 1/2-Can, that any conservative who operates as a functional human being will elicit a contrast response and possible tingles. Not as much of an exaggeration as you’d think but be aware that the left practices ostracism in place of debate, so you never know.

Go with guns for best bang-to-buck-to-bang contrast. Overeducated guys who look like AWB* members (ie most of the readers of this blog) are well served by getting to know their firearms and owning several choice ones. This is, of course, another good reason to get the fuck out of DC, gents.

No pussy pieces, real man guns: assault weapons, combat pistols. But don’t overcompensate either. Only jackasses who don’t actually shoot go for Soldier of Fortune stuff. Unless you are really a mercenary you look like a dork. Best: Family heirloom items that have been blooded in battle are worth their literal weight in gold.

Some chicks will be repelled when you unleash the arsenal – I find it’s effective to have several pieces out for “cleaning” the first time she drops by your pad – but the rest will be overwhelmed with juices and submission. An on the spot rawdog is commonplace, without much chit-chat or fuss. No cuddles after, ever.

So unless you have family firearms and/or some military experience – and I think I’m talking to most readers here – get smart on guns, join a club, and rake in the poon and have a great time doing it. You will also be prepared to defend hearth, home, and cooch when you need to.

*Accountants Without Borders (best in ages, btw) not Afrikaner Resistance Movement: though the latter does work with Nazi-chicks, trust me.

My general dating avatar is that of the bookish, cultured creative type. I take girls to nice wine bars and talk about philosophy and film, and play guitar for them.

Is the contrast I’m looking for that of the dumb, sporty guy, or that of the rugged bad boy? So basically, a sports team fetishIM team membership or a leather jacket and weekend hiking trips? Or something else?

You nailed it. I used to see those kinds of businesses all over Phuket, Thailand. Owned and operated by farangs.

@GdI,

Ya, you still have to calibrate it perfectly, though. A guy with tats has to demonstrate he is authentically a bad motherfucker. That doesn’t mean beating people up, but at least some muscle mass. No moobs allowed. Likewise with guns, sure you can have some guns…but what if you look like Newman from Seinfeld…you still ain’t gonna score any poon.

Same with cars. I knew a girl who whenever she saw a guy in a muscle car would say, “That guy must be suffering from serious penis extension.”

Is the contrast I’m looking for that of the dumb, sporty guy, or that of the rugged bad boy? So basically, a sports team fetishIM team membership or a leather jacket and weekend hiking trips? Or something else?

My advice, like this blog, is intended for men who can be saved. Not the Newmans, who ought to accept that, no matter what they do, they will never get any pussy worth having, and their damaged genes will die with them.

I’m a really nice guy, but I like to change things up for contrast such as:

1. Randomly tripping the elderly.
2. Taking a shit on the sidewalk.
3. Grabbing people’s cell phones and taking pictures of my balls… while they were in the middle of a conversation.
4. And my go-to move: putting my hand in a girls purse and taking her money to pay or meals right in front of her.

We also all know that women are not capable of self reporting what turns them on.

Unless you have direct personal experience with using your cock and seducing women, you are in no position to judge what is a gina killer or tingler.

Not even about what would work for you.

Here’s the back story:

Once upon a time, I allowed a 41 year old married woman to initiate an affair with me. After a while it started to become serious. Her husband was twenty five years older than her, and a father figure in her life. She was constantly cracking on me in subtle underhanded ways that I wasn’t man enough.

One night, I tried a little role play during sex, with this woman, who was 11 years older than me. I played Daddy.

Now, you can scream Ewww, all you want. But unless a man that you are way into has given you the big bone and the Daddy role play treatment, you have no idea what you are talking about. That’s like a 9 year old saying ewww! to sex. She has no idea how much she’ll soon come to love it.

It was years later that I started to take on the Daddy role play as a persona.

There is a slick looking guy featured on the 2nd and 3rd parts of the HD Net video I posted above about Cougars Paying Alimony. The guy is an alimony recipient. He hooked his ex-wife for lifetime alimony to the tune of $100,000/year.

With his $100,000/yr windfall & money no longer being a problem, he quit is day job, and now works as a Yoga Instructor.

Here’s the deal. People who’ve had their two halves of the brain surgically separated by a slice through the corpus collosum have to find workarounds between the two halves in order to be aware of what a good portion of their self is thinking. One trick is for the left hand while in a pocket to prick the finger with a toothpick. The left hand, which is controlled by the right hemisphere, can send a message to the left hemisphere through pain, as pain sensations are processed globally.

So to with gina tingles. If you find yourself having sex with a guy on a public transportation system, you’ll know you are turned on by the guy.

The stories you tell yourself about it are irrelevant.

It really makes not difference what so ever what women SAY turns them on. It’s who they fuck on public transportation that matters.

For me the beard is just there to balance out the ‘hawk. The hair is what really intrigues them. I now have women blatantly approaching me in bars and stores and such and nothing has really changed except the hair.

Hate it as some of you may, but tatts, crazy hair, motorcycles, flashy shirts, jewelry, etc…..all of it can help get you laid if it is congruent with your personality.

You can call me a douchebag all you want, I don’t give a damn. It works.

Ok, Daed and al, unless you’ve been gamed by the best, it’s unlikely that you’ll have ever done it in the middle of the street, in daytime, viewed by gated community security guards and some random girls walking around the corner. But surely at least you’ve been so overpowered with lust as to have had sex in at least one of these places:
* public restroom
* stairwell
* behind a car on the side of the road
* in the low surf on a crowded beach
* at the side of the highway in the front seat with the girl riding on top
* on forest foot paths
* up against the hotel room window
* on the balcony overlooking the street

This makes me wonder, are there girls ungameable to certain levels? There must be. You yourself have said you’d take someone considered a ‘slut’ who was overtly sexual over girls who could control their urges. (or whatever, you can figure out the contrast I mean.) So … never been gamed by someone good enough to have done it in the public street scenario you mention, or some women just aren’t gameable to that level?

Appreciate the elaboration, though, as the subway doesn’t work so much. Call me prissy, fairly enough, but about the only time a car is close to empty enough is when someone stumbles over to urinate. And scene. [and no, I do not consider standing room only cars as possible locations.]

So sorry to disappoint. Our unfortunate weather doesn’t encourage too many al fresco activities and our cars and buildings are so badly constructed that the other suggestions would all involve serious risk to life and limb. Living in a cold damp country with a poor infrastructure really limits one’s potential for sluttiness.

Al, unfortunately your intuition is correct. Some girls will only let you finger them in the movie theater. Most will go down on you under a blanket in the bus. But it’s the precious few, the holy sacred grail of sexual thrill, to have sex in the middle of the road.

Yes alimony cuts both ways in some states. Here there are strong guidelines under a statute. But in most states family law judges have a lot of discretion on alimony and its given far more often to women, and sometimes about never to men, though they have to SOUND formally gender neutral about it, attributing it to having “sacrificed by being a stay at home mom” for example, or her “services in entertaining his business associates at dinner parties” and so on. What horseshiite. She was contemporaneously getting plenty in sharing his lifestyle while she did such things.

Being a stay at home mom’s not sufficient reason either. It’s always a woman’s choice if/ when she’s a stay at home mom. No one can legally force her to be, and it’s entirely culturally verboten in all corners of American culture for a man to strongly pressure her to do that against her wishes — or for him to too strongly pressure her to go back to work either, unless they just can’t make it otherwise. Further it’s pretty damn lazy with modern conveniences for a woman to remain at home full time when her kids are all in school and esp in school almost the whole day.

What’s more the husband is paying for her to be a stay at home mom by supporting her and the rest of the family entirely on his own.

To then turn around and tell him he has to pay alimony to his ex wife who’s no longer doing anything for him, but who’s instead stolen his kids from him together with child support=also heavily alimony, and 2.5 to 1 is the one who wanted the divorce, is outrageous.

At least this woman was the one who sought the divorce, and did so for no compelling reason.

But yes alimony should be abolished.

Until it is men shouldn’t marry. They should live together instead. At most marry w/a prenup that mimics living together in the event of a divorce.

Or tries to. The trouble with marriage w/a prenup is that courts are increasingly refusing to respect waivers of alimony if they find them “unreasonable” at the time of divorce. Well the whole point of a prenup is to vary the private agreement from what family courts have been finding most “reasonable”.

Doug1 –
Yeah prenups are a complete crapshoot. If anything they give more “material” for the lawyers to fight over, meaning more billable hours, meaning whomever gets ordered to pay all the fees (for both sides) at the end, gets screwed twice as hard.

BTW – The second alimony-paying lady at the end of the video, the blonde one, is a real cutie.

I think until the laws change THE ONLY safe marriage for a guy is to marry a high earning chick; provided she is also good in other departments.

High adrenaline activities cause people to pair bond, and pair bonding causes people to enjoy high adrenaline activities together.

If a girl is being publicly risque with you, it means she’s into you. Way.

And a way to get a girl to become way into you is by being publicly risque.

Of course women who only get sexual in the bedroom with the lights out can still be erotic. My point was – hey – let’s play a what if mind game. What if you take that same eroticism and turned it up a notch? Turned it up to 11. What would that look like?

Might it look like wearing a mini skirt with no panties and getting rubbed every time you go up the escalator with your boyfriend?

Such what if scenarios don’t turn everyone on – some find it distasteful. But what if your amplifier did go up to 11. What would that look like?

it seems to me it is girls who want to have sex in public more than men. it’s women who want to be SEEN hooked up with a high status male, whereas a guy just wants to fuck a hot girl. also, i think it is more exciting for women because they are the one’s taking the greater social risk should they be caught.

interesting point about the screaming. of course female humans tend to scream a lot during sex also. never occurred to me before that they are doing it as broadcasting, but now that you mention it i’m sure it is the case.

High adrenaline activities cause people to pair bond, and pair bonding causes people to enjoy high adrenaline activities together.

Yeah sure. But there are lots of ways of having high adrenaline sex besides risk of getting caught or the semi certainty of it (sex on public transport unless deserted at 3 am in some cities or something). Though that is a big one, admittedly.

Speaking as someone who’s done all of your list except full sex on a stairwell. Oral though …

I know. I read on, mesmerised by shock and awe. Btw SDaedalus once nearly had a moment of weakness in a forest glade, her virtue was saved when a foot collided with a nearby anthill however. It took the whole summer for the marks caused by the antbites to subside on both parties. Xsplat’s suggestions are definitely not for the (accident) prone.

I’m an introspective type (bah), but heavily muscled, so it’s unexpected when I open my mouth and turn out not to be a retard.
Girls often say they thought I was a douchebag when they first saw me in a bar.

Anyone got advices for me…

6 months ago I banged a chick who was visiting my city. We exchanged MSN, and over time, developed a kind of closeness via the internet and voice messages (bit questionable, yes, but I like her, she’s intelligent and interesting).

She’s fallen for me, and is coming to visit me in a week. Problem: I’m entirely certain she has built up in her head an idealised fantasy of me, which exceeds reality by a factor of 1000.
I’m going through a shitty, dark period of my life, and it has discernably fucked me up despite my best intentions. Basically, I feel that I can’t compete with the idealised myth in her head.

And seriously though, Doug. I think that if a woman hasn’t been gamed yet into some sort of risky sex, she has not yet dated a man who would otherwise rise way above the sexual competition.

Men just don’t step up. Competing in the sexual marketplace is overlooked in importance. If a man is not being risque with his girl, he is not thrilling her as much as a man who would do so.

Girls get horny. What a man wants to do is have her get frequently horny. Then build that up until she is nearly always horny. Then pretty well always horny. A full time sexual consumation, that comes in ebbs and flows, but never subsides.

Sarlacc’s writing is captivating. Hypnotic and smooth. Draws you right in. One imagines a depth of patience that can spring to catch lightning – intriguing, dangerous, and . . . you just can’t look away.

So many different guises, charisma takes.

Hypnotizing a woman’s mind, as the charmer handles a snake – this is what charisma is for.

If you’re at a period where the steam is being let out of the pot as fast as you produce it, where you don’t feel an internal warmth and controlled powerful pressure, where your narcissism meter is only pointing at atmospheric pressure, here is a trick that may help.

Whatever negative or weak thing you notice about yourself, see how others are also, in some modest way, dealing with the same thing. Then see how this makes us all bonded and communal in essence. This will not only throw you into empathetic communion with strangers, but will change your mindset from feeling along to being amongst a community of valuable peers.

We’re all in the same boat.

This thought will shake you out of feelings of inadequacy, and allow you to notice the steam that is leaking away is in itself a good thing. That you feel inadequate itself, that’s the self awareness, that’s the good thing – that’s the human condition that we share. Just the fact of that steam can be a gateway to bonding and sharing with someone.

when i was younger i always had single pals to hang out with and a great wingman in the form of a hot chick roommate whom other girls often assumed was with me. but now all my guy friends are married and the hot chick roommate is gone. so if i go out to any sort of pick up scene im outside the circle of security. i may as well be a foreigner who s new in town.

You would be amazed at how many meals I’ve had through that curiosity. Not my curiosity, you understand, the food’s curiosity. Presenting something out of place is usually enough, after that it’s a matter of gauging how the food calibrates its safety against its sense of curiosity. It helps to keep the real reach of the kill zone hidden until it’s too late.

You pointed out another interesting detail. Ironically, perhaps, capturing more than one prey is easier than capturing a single one when it comes to talking food. If the food is in a group, capturing one is a guarantee that the others will stick around until I finish the meal, be it because they try to rescue that prey, or because they simply want to watch its struggle. While they are watching, I can do whatever I want out of their sight to capture them, and they never realize until it’s too late to escape.

It only applies to talking food, though. Non-talking food will flee at the first sign of danger, leaving others behind if they must. I wonder if it’s a side effect of the development of language.

All of your ideas are really clever. Cleverness is a substitute for intelligence and one day the clever person always gets caught in his own trap but it does pay in the short run; hence stupid people can’t resist being clever.

Brilliance is a habit of mind – it’s where you are so habituated to looking for patterns that your ever expanding repertoire of interlocking systems is able to piece the puzzles together using massively parralel processing, so that in an instant, and then another, and another, you have Eureka moments.

It’s a simple habit of never being satisfied with anything less than a comprehensive picture. It’s curiosity that can not rest. It’s the muse.

Ok, I’ll admit, maybe this was sorta introduced to me (I mean I’d certainly heard of it before) by a hot NYRican girl who called me “papi” during hard sex, which of course encouraged me to mine that vein of emotion.

Drawing conclusions is done in one of two ways:
* based on a small group of “relevant” information
* based on an incredibly wide group of non-relevant information.

The genius uses his mind in a way fundamentally different from a normal. The genius calls for completely irrelevant information, all in under a blink of an eye, to piece together a deeply informed and unique perspective.

This is what metaphor and imagery is about. You call forth from an incredibly wide net of experience, not just the “relevant”.

This is what insight is.

It’s a completely different way of seeing the world – because it is not based on habit. It is the muse. Fresh. Always searching. Unique perspectives, over and over, endlessly.

It’s a shame it’s not more common. It’s lonely when everyone is robotic and dull in speech.

you have some points as you usually do but I must say my own experiences do not match yours. Or your conclusions for that matter. You envision the ultimate public sex expereince but the reality of some are that they can be mediocre at beast and not at all the passion lust fest you write of. Sometimes two people just don’t connect. Don’t get me wrong, there can be good times had but it can also be awkward and uneventful– and it is those with wild imaginations that benefit the most from such tales. I have been overcome with desire for a man while in public and I have also had it dud. It happens.

If you ever hear a writer tell you he is giving up, you’ve got an opportunity to make a winning wager. Writers don’t write for any purpose – not even pleasure. They write because they can’t help it. The way their mind works makes free and regular expression compulsory. Creative types are saddled with an energy intensive need to see and communicate visions.

It is this habit of mind that lies at the core of genius. An untiring, never ending hunger for creative associations.

I suppose you have a point there, happy, except that did you ever mix in a little pain with your sex? Now, some might find that teeth clamping down on the nipples is distracting. On the other hand, the overload of sensations can take it to a totally different level.

Adding risk to sex is like that. It just ups the overall juice.

You know how time is said to slow down in times fighting? The mind goes into overdrive and processes more information into the same period of time.

Public sex is like that. It slows down time. Makes each moment stand out in technicolor, frame by frame. Those are also the moments that will get etched permanently into your brain, and will be available for vivid recall long after you’ve forgotten the other sexual experiences.

This post is as useful or better than any other I’ve seen here. It’s exactly why I’ve gotten laid a ton in my life–although it’s been unintentional in my case. Pay attention to this if you want chicks to go back to your place. Totally fucking works.

I’d disagree that public sex is essential to get all women into the bonding state you describe though. Put another way, you don’t always need to use all the tools in your toolkit to get something fixed; it depends on the circumstances.

If a woman has had a lot of sexual partners, or is readily able to dissociate sex and emotion, the act of sex, even good sex, in itself, may not be enough to achieve your bonding result, I accept that public sex may be necessary to take it to the next level (although I think even then with some women it may not work, some people find the possibility of onlookers arousing, others just distracting in a bad way), ditto with pain.

If, on the other hand, the woman hasn’t had as much sexual experience, or is of a type that naturally bonds very closely to someone she has sex with, you may not need to pull the public sex card to get to your desired result, of course for some of you public sex may be an end in itself rather than a mechanism of control, in which case non-participation would presumably be a deal-breaker.

I do agree that romance is not optional, for a lot of us women it’s impossible to dissociate sex from emotion. This works both ways btw, sex (even bad sex) can lead to bonding in such women and, conversely, bonding can break down without sex.

contrast is king. reading xsplat and doug1 (and polymath now) suck each others’ cocks is boring. i take a two day media diet and revert to the same junk food figuratively; gotta kick that. yeah it tastes great but it’s fucking pointless. get on some next level shit, take some drugs or something, maybe chug a few five hour energy drinks, and go out slapping asses.

a rogue Game handbook is plenty controversial. publishing mcgraw-hill revisions every semester is fucking gayyyyyyyyy

Many hookers do really get fully into sex with some of their clients. Not with others or most.

That’s been my experience. I will go to hookers here in Germany because they have good whorehouses and its easy, relatively cheap, convenient, my wife won’t find out, no false rape charges, and a great time for all. Hookers in the US are expensive, risky, and crappy, as well as often ugly as shit.

I invariably develop a good rapport with most hookers I’ve been with and will have a nice chat afterwards too. I’ve even given one or two the big O, although most try hard not to cum because they don’t want to bond with you or jsut don’t give a crap. There’s nothing like seeing that whistful look on a hooker’s face when you leave that says I wish you would stay and take me away from all this.

“public sex” can be quite good, with a person one connects with. If there is no connect it is short, unconformable and leaves little, if any, memory on the brain. People tend to read into any public situation that they may have heard of and believe me, it can be lacking greatly. So greatly in fact, that sex is never revisited after.

This is really me by the way. How the hell did someone sign in under me? Do you know my password?

Dude, stop getting ahead of yourself. The fucker in the pic with the tatts is a dog walker that is all. He’s a professional dog walker earning 7 bucks an hour. Any NYC chick would run a mile when she finds that out. Try and think a little before you get all excited.

You know, for someone who claims to be so awesome, you sure can be dumb sometimes. One can put whatever one wants in the name, E-mail and Website fields when posting comments while not logged in. Case in point, this post.

I see mens’ rights commetners denounce child support. That’s one thing I do not get. If you make a child, it should go without saying that you assume your share of respoinsibility for it. And I say this as someone who had two credible pregancy scares in my twenties — the feeling is like ice cold hand of death.

Of course, the devil is in the details. Child support needs to be commensurate with custody, and must go directly to the child, not be discretionary cash for your former girlfriend or pump&dump.

PA, you have already touched on this, but, men do not oppose Child Support, they oppose Mommy Support. Especially if the mother is doing things like “maximizing” custody of the children and, therefore, maximizing the number of hours that she must take care of them. This then translates into more “Child Support”. It also prevents the father from seeing the children more often.

There are other gambits in this disgusting game, but that is one example.

Guys, check the email. Every email has a randomly generated kaleidoscope looking avatar. If you put in no email – you get one particular blue and white one (Pupu and many other people use this). If you see someone post with this avatar, it could be anyone.

Hey, that’s a clever security measure. You know someone is real if they have their usual avatar. Now I need to figure out how you attach your own personalized avatar.

Even though xsplat and anoukange are very tempting to parody because of their distinctive personas, it’s way uncool to do it by appropriating their name. If you want to parody someone anonymously, parody their name too (e.g. ysplat or anookie)

You can parody almost anyone through the internet. It’s so easy to because those doing the parodies often reveal little about themselves, allowing themselves room to make fun of the human qualities of other individuals that apparently seem so funny in print.

Yes, but this blog’s comment community has some particularly rich targets….

By the way, I liked your blog, and I think it’s a very good idea for a teenage girl in college like you to follow Chateau. It’s best to have your eyes open, and most college girls (and guys) have no clue about the mysteries of game. My daughter is starting college in the fall and I am trying to figure out a good book to give her to wise her up (I could show her this blog but it’s for advanced students, need something that starts from the basics).

Your post about “Wildcat” was cryptic, but if what I think happened happened, you did exactly the right thing. The legal system has serious deficiencies, but nothing else would have resulted in either justice or closure.

You are right in theory but it is unworkable in practice to establish after the fact whether the man “wanted” the child. He should either use condoms, have a vasectomy, or be responsible for any children resulting from sex; after all, the pill sometimes fails even when the woman didn’t intend it to. The only exception is if he is paying a hooker, then there is an implicit contractual waiver and he shouldn’t be held responsible for kids.

Theoretically the man and the woman could sign a pre-prenup establishing that he will not be responsible for any kids, but good luck working that into the seduction process.

Abortion is homicide, giving up a child for adoption is inhumane. By banging, especially without a rubber, a man assumes a risk. There is no backing out of your responsibility once you create a life (assuming true paternity, fair custody, and proper use of child support money.)

Child support is still the easy way out. In other times and places, you get killed or shotgun-wed.

Agree about abortion, disagree about adoption — huge shortage of healthy babies to be adopted in the USA, millions would like to adopt, but the 1.2 million abortions a year make that impossible (less than 20,000 per year available for adoption from abroad). It’s not inhumane to give a child up for adoption to a good family.

Ironically, I met my first wannabe PUA in high school at one of the two parties I went to my senior year of high school.

He used “the cube” and a number of other generic tricks, but I didn’t know them at the time and thought it was funny.

Right now he and I are best friends, but mainly it’s because he was a novice and I could tell what he was after right away (sex) and didn’t give it to him.

I’m friends with a number of other PUA type guys for the same reasons and learn things from them.

Honestly, before I went to college my dad said,”Here’s a lesson for you about college guys–they all want sex.” I think if you just teach her to remember that quote at all times, it’ll help. That way, even when she’s buzzed, and this guy is saying the sweetest things to her, she’ll remember that and not fall prey to them. Just a thought.

Oh, I didn’t realize that is what you were referring to. If the mother wants to keep the child then the father should contribute enough that she can afford to do that, absent a legal agreement exempting him.

Doug1, if you don’t want to put the condom on (which you can always justify on the grounds of not believing the pill is 100% effective), then you’d better be watching her swallow her pill each day. The legal system is biased against men for child support, but a man is responsible for his own seed. If the child exists, you’re his Daddy, and running away from that is reprehensible.

About 10 years ago, I was traveling to see a long distance girlfriend when my car broke down. I put it in a shop and took Greyhound for the rest of the trip.

On the bus, I met an athletic (college swimmer), very busty, cute babe. Objectively, about a 7.5 with the boobs probably boosting her to an 8. After about 2 hours of the tightest game of my life, we started making out. 20 minutes later she whispered “I want to get naked” and unzipped my pants. She went down on me on a bus that had every seat filled. Those around us were aware of what was going on, but said nothing. I felt a bit bad about the 13 year old girl directly across, she and her mother would not meet my eyes.

After I got to my destination, my girlfriend picked me up and tried to jump me once we got to her place. Due to (misplaced) guilt and the recent nut, I refused her, which made her even more anxious for me the next morning.

My only regret is that I didn’t follow up with the swimmer girl to fully close the deal later.

The legal system is biased against men for child support, but a man is responsible for his own seed. If the child exists, you’re his Daddy, and running away from that is reprehensible.

The trouble with that is threefold:

1) why does she get the post coital option of i) plan B; ii) abortion or iii) adoption, but he gets no post coital options under our current highly misandrous legal system;

2) most “accidental” pregnancies are accidental on purpose, conscious and subconsious. After all, girls or many of them the consequences of out of wedlock births are no longer terrible for most girls, as they once were. Why else is it that now with more reliable kinds of birth control than ever, that the rate of white out of wedlock childbirth has gone from the low single digit percentage in 1960 to almost 30% today? Why do almost all of these women keep their babies today rather than Plan B, abortion or adoption, whereas in 1960 most white girls give their unwed pregnancies up for adoption, when that was their only post coital legal or safe option then?

3) “child support” has been set so high as to amount to mostly alimony when it’s for one child. As well why should a man who never wanted the child be obligated to pay more than minimal basic support for the child if anything at all, not some very high percentage of his after tax income so he’s compelled to share his success with a child he never wanted and with a woman he never wanted to have a permanent relationship with? While she did want the child or she’d have exercised one of her many options to not parent it or provide for it. Certainly it wasn’t past practice that a slut could compel a man she’s slept with a few times to support her child. That’s only hyper feminist practice.

I follow my daughter’s Facebook page, which she admits I have the right to do, though when she goes off to college I’m sure there will be stuff I never know about. Her BF is 2 years older and in the Navy, and she wears his dogtags 24-7, so she will have some defenses in place, and she is strong-willed enough and religious enough that even if a PUA gets her excited she’s not going to do anything really stupid. Nonetheless, her Mom and I are trying to make sure she understands what she will be dealing with. Unfortunately we are a bad example, because we got married while still in colllege and did not have any bad relationships before we met each other, but she should not expect to be as lucky as we were.

Regardless it’s an option available to her which a great many women who support abortion rights take advantage of at times they don’t want a child, and then when their clocks are far enough advanced, don’t in the case of an oops esp. with a suitable bio and fullsome child support dad.

Poly: It’s not inhumane to give a child up for adoption to a good family.

PA: That’s fine, but forcing an unwilling mother, by coersion or circumstances, to give up a child is inhumane.

She’s not being forced just because she has to support the child that only she wanted herself. Plenty of women do it. At most an unwilling and likely duped into pregnancy father should have to pay bare minimum support for the kid alone and none for her.

Doug1, You are right in theory but it is unworkable in practice to establish after the fact whether the man “wanted” the child.

It’s not unworkable in the least. It’s no more unworkable than HER deciding before the time for abortion is legally closing whether she wants to chose that legally available option, or before the time for giving the child for adoption is closing whether she wants to choose that.

All she has to do is notify the biodad in a timely fashion and ask him. He could respond by reproduceable email or certified letter, with copies, for purposes of legal proof down the road.

All except the documented response from him is part of current custom anyway. What decent girl doesn’t tell the biodad that she’s preggers early enough for him to have input? How reasonable is that of her when she doesn’t?

My parents do not know about my blog. They found out about my facebook last semester. I’m not really hiding anything. I have a very open relationship with my mother, but not so much with my father anymore. We still love each other, but it’s complicated.

Having a boyfriend going into college helps, even though those relationships don’t always last, I have a great relationship with my high school ex and he has been there for me so many times. We always say that if we’re together (in the same city or very close proximity) after college, we’ll try again. Who knows?

Reading PUA blogs can be shocking and sometimes mildly disturbing. I think the other site I read occasionally is broslikethissite. It’s more similar to the college fratboy she’ll meet than maybe these advanced PUAs who go to clubs and bars. “The Boy” who I currently mention in my blog is a caricature of the site. I make fun of him for it. I see the same route in that relationship as all the other “PUA” relationships I’ve had; there’s a lot of flirting, no sex, and an eventual friendship.

As I said already, you are not going to get the courts to recognize a distinction between “good girl” and “slut”. The only distinctions they will recognize are married vs unmarried vs prostitute. And however much you think abortion is OK, it is NEVER OK to pressure a woman to abort. No way, no how, never, not negotiable, case closed. The time to ensure your rights is before you squirt, not after.

A legal regime that says a man is liable for child support only if he was married to the mother and a DNA test proved his paternity is the only alternative to the current situation where the unmarried biological father is fully responsible, nothing in between is legally workable. Furthermore, even in such a legal regime, you would still have a moral obligation to your biological children.

Theoretically the man and the woman could sign a pre-prenup establishing that he will not be responsible for any kids, but good luck working that into the seduction process.

Or that could be the law by default and she has to get a pre-coital agreement from him that he would be responsible for any kid if she wants that result.

That would much more comport with reality, and require agreement only in the extraordinary case. Because the great majority of men in fact don’t want to support a child outside of marriage — and women in fact are abundantly aware of that fact in our culture as in others. Your daughter is abundantly aware of it for example.

A legal regime that says a man is liable for child support only if he was married to the mother and a DNA test proved his paternity is the only alternative to the current situation where the unmarried biological father is fully responsible, nothing in between is legally workable.

That would be excellent. Then do away with welfare paid for more than a very short transitional time. You know, just as most countries in the world don’t have welfare. China for example. It’s a western socialist thing, copied by some other countries that have generally copied us a lot, such as china.

The result would be VASTLY fewer out of wedlock births right quick. Might take a tough transitional period. In fact it surely would. Just as we transitioned to here from 1960 (when there wasn’t much welfare either, except in a few places like NYc which were already showing ill effects from it). The transition back would be a lot faster though, since real pain would attach.

Just saw your long comment which was stuck in moderation. I agree that child support should be set at a low level, equal to 50% of the cost of food+clothing+medical+transportation+incremental housing (e.g. 2 bedroom apt vs 1 bedroom apt). Would you object to such a mandate?

As for post coital options: if the mother doesn’t want to keep the child the father should have the right to keep it, so I agree that he should legally be given this option. The asymmetry of her being able to abort a child without the father’s consent may seem unfair but it’s dictated by biology and it is silly to whine about it. (Legal marriage on the other hand should include a right for the husband to veto abortions.)

to the a-hole posting as me..please stop. I have never claimed to be good with computers, even with the simple things. I’m old school in that sense. I can do wonders with illustration software but regular computer stuff isn’t my thing. Get your own name, thanks.

The problem with making the default no child support obligations outside of marriage is it would greatly discourage marriage and greatly encourage abortions. On the other hand, trying to combine it with an abortion ban would make the odds of passing such a change in the law go from 1% to 0.001%.

The only feasible route to legal sanity that I can see is incentivizing marriage for men by eliminating no-fault divorce, possibly by making covenant marriage available in all states. The party at fault in the divorce will be presumed to lose custody but will have limited child support obligations of 50% of food+clothing+medicine+transportation+incremental housing and no alimony, with negotiations for different allocation of custodial and financial responsibilities possible.

Yes, Poly, you could enforce child support onto men who have made it clear they don’t want to have a kid. I disagree that this is more moral than not doing so, and ask you to consider this alternative arrangement.

Arrange not for direct payment transfers from the man of 1/2 the real costs of raising the kid, but instead arrange for socialized distribution of what a kid actually needs. Food and clothes, through school breakfast/lunch programs, soup kitchens and limited purchasing power Costco coupons. This would keep the unfit moms from feeding cheetos and pop tarts to their spawn, and it would keep the kids in Costco brand jeans and shoes.

This would stigmatize the children. Is that unfair? Yes. Life is unfair. The kid is paying for Mom’s bad choices. When he gets older, he’ll wish that his kids never have to go through that.

Mothers have an innate drive to have their kids be of high status. Make it in her face that her kid is suffering in status, and she’ll work to get a job and take care of the kid right. Or get a new husband – a man who actually wants kids.

I’ve lived in a Filipino barrio. I’ve seen how low people can go, as a family and as a group. It’s disgusting. When you completely remove the safety net, you see in your face how unable some people are to cope with their lives – drinking and drugging away the childrens rice money, kids running wild or being bounced between relatives. People judge each other harshly and rigidly based on what section of town you live in.

That kind of class consciousness is not something we should strive to erase.

Inside some of these barrios you’ll also find functional families, each kid putting her younger brother or sister through school, and on until they are all degreed.

If you are like me, then you do the bare minimum amount of work required. As Canadian Singer David Wilcox the bad apple explained, “Well I can get down, and stop fooling around, when the going gets tough, situation gets rough” Until then I’ll happily spend all my free time with wine women and song.

Well, let the going get tough, let the situation get rough.

Feed and clothe the kids. Don’t make them comfortable. Don’t “help” the poor innocent kids. Let em hurt, give em every opportunity to live a better life.

In all things, follow the money. Want a bloated police state? Give them endless money to fight a never ending drug war. Want a bloated underclass? Give em free choices to not fail – give them no incentive to stop fooling around. No incentive to get their shit together.

Some filipino men are the laziest most useless pieces of detrius you’ll ever have the misfortune to know. Guess what? They find it DIFFICULT to get laid. The woman only want to date guys with money. That’s as it should be.

@Doug1, The problem with making the default no child support obligations outside of marriage is it would greatly discourage marriage and greatly encourage abortions.

Giving the child up for adoption would be an alternative to abortion. It would greatly increase that though from it’s current low levels among white women.

I don’t see it discouraging marriage at all. It would greatly encourage women to marry men in fact. It would do nothing to discourage men in doing so. Reducing the burdens of divorce on men as well would lower female initiated divorces which is the overwhelming majority of them, on a 2.5 to

Clearly the concept of child support is grossly abused today, on so many levels.

At its worst, such as that case of being forced to pay child support for children not biologically yours to the child’s biological parents (after your wife cuckolded you), I’d call these practices human rights violations. No joke.

Melt and fawn at the sight of babies, gush subtly about a future married life, yet never buy the ring or attempt to impregnate (do bareback) her. Only sport fuck her. Chuck her aside when she gets too whiny/demanding/clingy or when you need fresher meat, whichever comes first.

And regarding child support – it’s nothing but a racket for lawyers. He or she who gets custody of the kids should do all the ‘child supporting’ without a cent from the ex-spouse. If both man and woman can’t afford to clothe, feed and educate the kids, then those kids shall be put up for adoption/auction. Problem solved.