A Request

Friends,
Even though I´m furiously editing my weight loss memoir so that you´ll have it in your hands next spring, I´d just love to hear from you. I’d also love to talk more about your comments on “Growing Up With a Fat Dad,” but I’m having internet trouble and that only leads me to two things: crying and cake, neither of which involve problem-solving. In the meantime, what I´d really like to know is:
What questions do you have for me that I haven´t answered? What topics would you like me to talk more about in a post, in a blog series? I ask because although I feel I have a pretty solid handle on what I deem worth sharing, I´m nearly certain there are things you wish I´d cover that I don´t currently. And, barring anything that would require me to write a post the length of my foot (11 inches, thankyouverymuch), the sky´s the limit in terms of topic.

I will do my very best to answer them, as always, with highly cringe-inducing honesty.

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101 thoughts on “A Request”

What about recipes for one or two people? It’s hard to find healthy meals that are make so little, so I often resort to Lean Cuisines or the like. I’m in medical school and work in the hospital, so (sadly) I don’t have a lot of time to cook. Any suggestions? Thanks!!

Morgan – I live alone and find this to be a problem as well. A lot of recipes make 4 servings so I cut everything in half. Then eat one portion of dinner and 1 for lunch the next day (or freeze it for later). There’s a gluten free pizza dough that I like to make and it comes in a bag and you add eggs, oil and some other things. I make the whole batch, divide it in thirds, use one for that night and then freeze the other two. Oh, for recipes that call for eggs, I use just the egg white. Hope that helps!

I will read anything you post about. I’m new to your blog, but I absolutely love everything I’ve read. I agree with Morgan….One person recipes would be great. Also, my personal issue is how to avoid binge eating/boredom eating. You’ve probably posted on those topics already…I’ll be reading my way through the archives as time allows.

Melody – check out http://www.sparkpeople.com it’s an AMAZING weight loss website that is TOTALLY free, plus they have online support tools like forums, and tons of articles.

For cutting down on binge eating, I allow myself to have some of whatever it is that I want. Rather it’s a scoop of ice cream or a slice of cake. I allow myself to have it because I know that if I don’t I will eat the entire cake or container of ice cream later. Also, I make sure that whatever I eat will work in to my calorie allowance for the day. I also make sure that I drink a whole glass of water with it so that it makes me feel full. Hope all of that helps!

Is that really the size of your foot? Just because, well, I have large feet and it’s impossible to find shoes, and if you have large feet that make shoe shopping difficult as well, well, then I think I love you a little more :)

The thing I always want to understand better from people who have successfully lost weight is the internal dialogue that occurs when you are losing weight and mainatining — such as how your inner dialogue helps or hurts your efforts. Mostly I am curious about how it helped. What mantras, thoughts or beliefs you repeated and held in your mind to help make you sucessful. For example what was the thought process that helped you say no to the extra piece of cake (or three) or to eat a healthy size portion vs. a “growing teenage boy” sized portion of lasagna. That’s what I’m most curious about. How your thoughts evolved and worked with you to help you succeed. And the thoughts you felt hurt you the most.

Andy – My suggestion is more something I would like to see added to your blog, not necessarily a topic.

I would be REALLY helpful if you could include the nutritional info and portion sizes/amounts for your recipe. I know this can be difficult to do since there are so many ingredients that go in to the scrumptious things you make. I have been taking the recipes I make from your blog and inputting them into the recipe calculator at http://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-calculator.asp It helps me a LOT and I’m sure everyone that reads your blog would appreciate it if you included the information. Thanks!!!!!

I would like more information about portion control, how to stay away from sweets (or truly eat them in moderation-I can’t have any in the house or bake them because I will eat it ALL), how to handle emotional eating, and your thoughts/methods to deal with PMS binge/craving eating.
You are the best Andie. Thank you!

I completely agree with Mary. I start out with the hugest dose of “I’m doing this” and all it takes to derail me is one day out of my routine that can’t be helped because of work issues, or kid issues, or other things that come up. And then it takes me weeks to get myself back on track, and even though I will stand in the kitchen eating those Oreos or Doritos and think “I shouldn’t be doing this…this is killing me” I just can’t make myself stay away from the bad for you stuff. I feel hopeless! Is there a way to make self control grow?!?! I would happily take that pill any day of the week!

I have a lot of trouble with eating more than I should as well, so a lot of times, I will portion out things like chips or sweets into single servings into Ziploc bags as soon as I get home from the grocery store. I also do this with cookies, etc that I bake myself. I put two in a bag, and tell myself (and my husband!) that they have to last two weeks until I can go to the grocery store again.

Hi Andie. I adore your blog and it has been so inspiring to me while I’m losing weight! I don’t think I’ve seen any in the past, but I’m wondering if you could do a post on stretch marks/loose skin/etc. I have many stretch marks, and to be honest its one of the things I’m terrified about for when I’m done losing weight. I know I will (unfortunately) have stretch marks, but am so nervous about loose skin and saggy spots. I’ve lost about 35 pound, but have about 50 more to go. I’d really love to know if you’ve ever had issues with either of these, and how you would suggest approaching the issues. Thanks so much!

I too have wanted to ask about that because it’s not something anyone addresses much but I didn’t know how to ask it. I despise the loose skin I have when I lose/gain/lose etc and often use that as an excuse to not lose “too much” which I know is a bad excuse!

Hi Andie! I came across your blog by chance, and can’t even tell you how much I love it, and how addicted to it I’ve become. There are so many things I can relate to, both before the weight loss journey and during (haven’t got to the after part yet, on my way though!). I’m down 40lbs so far, with about another 40 to go, and am also curious about excess/loose skin. There’s so much to read about people who have surgery to remove excess skin, and much less about those who don’t have to. I agree with Lauren that it would be really helpful for some personal insight! Thanks!

I want to know about what you did with a new, skinnier body. How did you deal with the extra skin (that’s got me totally freaking out right now) or did you luck up somehow and not have any? Did you have to weight-lift or do other things to help mitigate that issue? Did you go on a shopping binge when you became trimmer? Did it freak you out when you noticed guys checking you out more often? You are bold and honest in your stories, so I’d really like to hear your journey and impressions about this part of losing weight and living in a trimmer, healthier body. Thank you for your blog, by the way. I truly enjoy it and find it very inspirational.

How do you get over weight regains (have you ever had any???)…I am up about 12lbs…again…I feel like it is a constant roller coaster.

Do you have any feelings/beliefs/opinions on food intolerances…I am fairly certain I am lactose intolerant and I pretty much want to shed tears at the prospect of a life without cheese and greek yogurt, let alone gelato and cheesecake.

Do you miss running? I miss running, but it is too hard on my joints. I desperately want to run but I don’t know if it is worth the damage to my body.

Greek yogurt is actually good for lactose intolerant people as almost all of the lactose is processed out of it. Stick with 2% fat instead of 0% as you are even less likely to have problems with that. I am also severely lactose intolerant and there have been great strides in food for us unfortunate people recently :) Purely decadent or so delicious makes great coconut ice cream that tastes the same if not better than regular ice cream and they have lots of flavors. I’ve also found that almond milk is a great substitute for milk and you can use lactaid milk for things you must have regualr milk for. You can even make buttermilk by putting one tablespoon of lemon juice in one cup of lactaid milk. Whole foods has lots of other options and I would just try to think creatively. You’ll be surprised at how good food can still taste without dairy!

Thank you again so much for your blog!! I look forward to clicking on your page every day. :)

I wanted to ask you if you struggle with the urge to be extreme as I do? Do you ever overeat some of that AMAZING looking birthday cake your mom sent you, or that delightfully delicious looking cannoli, or even bagels, and then feel an enormous amount of guilt–to the point where it causes you to be extreme the next day? Completely limiting caloric intake and even going overboard on caloric output? I constantly struggle in this way. I just ordered the book Breaking Free From Compulsive Eating like you recommended and will read it soon, but sometimes I just feel completely paralyzed and hopeless on this issue.

I just have a couple questions, and I’m wondering if you or other readers are dealing or have dealt with this. First of all, how did you handle plateaus in your weight loss? Did you face them? My second question deals with the mental side, where you afraid of being skinny? I ask this because I’ve found myself lost about how to “be thin.”

Whatever you decide to talk about, I’ll be glad to read it. Good luck!

You wrote this post: http://www.canyoustayfordinner.com/peace-with-food/
and I loved it and have always felt like I needed a little more to understand. Maybe I should read those books as well, but I”m interested, as another reader posted, about your internal dialogue during this time of making peace and learning to be present instead of escaping into cake. What are the lies that went (and do they still???) go through your head and heart? What are the truths you combat them with? Just wondering!

I’d love more information on the diet/recipes you used to lose your weight initially. You’ve mentioned on how strict you were originally vs. now that you are maintaining. Was there a calorie count you were following? Were any foods off limits? I find you incredibly inspirational and would love any/all information you can provide.

I also am curious about skin elasticity and how you have handled that. Especially tummy and under arms. Also, I am would love to know more about how people approach and respond to a much different you.From salespeople to men….I know that there must be a difference in how a thinner you is received , invited and sought after. Thanks !

I lose the weight and then get freaked out by the attention. And to me attention just means being seen. I feel invisible when I’m fat which most of the time I prefer. I’m old enough to be your mother, but I feel exactly as I did when I was your age trying to lose the weight. Your 135 pounds feels exactly as limiting as my 35 pounds I need to lose. I tend to get nervous when I’m thin because I was “waiting” until I was thin to do everything I felt I could not do when I am big. And now that I’m thin I have no more excuses. How did you handle the transition from one state to the other?

Elizabeth, I am 25 and I feel very similarly. When I am heavier, people don’t see me so much, when I am slimmer I get a lot of attention and it scares me, because I am a very shy person with strangers. I am trying to build my confidence up while I am heavier this time, so I am not so scared when I am slimmer.

I would love to hear about this, too. I have always faded into the background and I HATE being noticed. Oh, I would die to be noticed in my mind, but when it happens I become so nervous and anxious. Being fat, I have learned to be the polite, pleasant, funny girl. I don’t know how to be bold, engaging, and charming. How do you become the woman you have dreamed of becoming in your mind for so long? How do you make the transition from fantasy to reality?

“Being fat, I have learned to be the polite, pleasant, funny girl. I don’t know how to be bold, engaging, and charming.” This is the most accurate description of my feelings that I’ve read. I have the same issues. I’ve always been overweight and I feel like those outgoing qualities come off differently coming from a “fat” person versus a “skinny” one. Realistically, I know it’s nonsense. Everyone at every size has the right to be bold, flirty, charming, etc., but my brain is wired to think that I should just remain as “unoffensive” as possible. I would love to hear about any changes in your mentality you had to make, if any.

I would like to know what suggestions you have for a middle aged woman – a mother of 5 and grandmother of 6, who works full time, has a house to run and a family to feed. I find NO time to do anything for myself. Suggestions on this phase of life would be most welcome!

I don’t have the grandkids but agree with everything else! Wish I could find blogs written by people who are in my age range and life situation (mid 40’s, married with children (almost college age), full time job etc…..

Dear Andie,
You are so brave to ask such a question! I’m not sure how you would answere questions from a 58 year old man that struggles to loose and keep off the lbs. I’m like the yoyo loose 20 lbs and gain back 10. I LOOVVEE to cook and according to all those who eat my cooking I do quite well. My problem is I love to eat that food and binge sometimes. I eat late in the evening and some say that is a problem. What do you think? :)

I would read anything you wrote or had to say- so often you talk about things I didn’t realize were “issues” or thoughts I contemplated with myself!

But, since you asked… I would like to know a little more detail about the phase of your life when you were working your butt off and trying to lose the weight (running 4 miles a day) How did you make it a priority? Did you have the feeling of failure when you skipped a day (or week!) How did you motivate yourself to get back “on track”? Did you have small goals/rewards along the way? What was going on when you entered ONEderland!? I love looking at your before/after pictures because it gives me hope- the beauty in your smile and eyes never changed though- which is one thing I have noticed about pictures of me from my past and now, that is how I know I am still under all this extra weight!

It is touching that you care to ask what your readers want to know- and that you are willing to be so honest. As always- you are amazing.

As a college student myself, I’d love a post on how you came to your career and what your college years were like, the good, the bad, the boys, the social life, and maybe what you would have told yourself had you the chance. I am a new reader, so you might have already covered this. Love your blog and thanks so much for being so connected to your readers!

Gosh, I so love reading your thoughts. Anything you write is truly a gift, so as always, thank you for sharing!

As someone who has lost weight, I sometimes struggle with finding inner peace. It has gotten easier, that is for sure, but I wonder if there will always be a moment when I think about the cream cheese on my bagel (even though it is now fleeting) or the icing on my cake. I know that life is meant to be enjoyed and I have decided that is what I will do…but some days, those moments just seem a bit louder than I would like. Suggestions would be appreciated!

I’d like to hear more about how your mindset changed from when you were overweight to when you lost the weight. I’ve lost over 60lbs (I still have 20 or so to go), but I was expecting a huge revelation, or to feel like a completely new person and I just don’t. I still struggle with trying to reach “perfection” or wondering when it’ll ever be enough. I also still feel like I see the same “fat” person in the mirror even though everyone around me tells me differently. Thank you!!

I’m not sure I have anything new to add, but wanted to second a lot of what’s already been said. I’m ecstatic whenever I see a new post, so I’ll happily read anything you ‘deem worth sharing,’ (can’t wait for your book, by the way!) My favorites are your posts about how your journey affected you emotionally. What you learned along the way helps me understand my own experiences better. (Strange how that happens!) So I’d love to hear anything else about your story…how you reached 260+ lbs, obstacles you encountered while losing the weight, transitioning to ‘thin girl,’ etc.

Probably more practical for me though, would be more recipes. I think you do a fantastic job of keeping in mind that most people aren’t going to have the time/money to cook elaborate meals with exotic ingredients. I’m not a foodie by nature, but I have put more time, effort, and appreciation into my dinners now that I’ve gotten healthy, and your recipes are often the perfect combination of delicious-ness, (not a real word,) frugality, (maybe a word…?) and simplicity, (I’m pretty sure I didn’t make that one up.)

My question would be how to motivate yourself on a daily basis. Or if you get off track, how do you make yourself get back on track? I’ve lost 40 lbs on WW but I’m sick of counting points. I’m just bored already with the idea of counting calories. What do I do to motivate myself AND keep eating in such a way as to lose 30 more pounds without counting – anything?

Hi Andie,
Thank you for constantly putting aside time for people. You have been an inspiration to me and obviously tons of others.
I’m curious about maintenance. After you lost down to your healthy weight, did you gain a couple (2-3) of pounds back in the following months or years? I’m also very curious about how you deal with using scales. Do you weigh, and how often. In maintenance do you find that you have learned more about nutrition and have changed your eating habits?

I think you could write your grocery list and we’d all love it. You are not only inspirational but incredibly talented. Do you get tired of hearing that? I think your continued writing on weight loss, an added recipe (nutritional info would be helpful) but also life in general and how you handle the ups and downs. What inspired you to embark on writing a book? Was there someone inspirational in your life journey? Write from your heart and we will follow but thanks for asking what we want to read.

I would love to hear about how your weightloss/relationship with food has impacted your romantic relationships. I would also love to hear about how you balance maintaining a healthy lifestyle with having an active social life. I struggle with that myself. My thin friends have no problem indulging in bottles of wine and cocktail, but I struggle with the calorie count of a ‘night out.’

I would like to know how you dealt with maintenance immediately after you stopped loosing ? Did you go up and down. I lost about 50 pounds, and I am currently trying to lose the last 10, however I cannot get over this last hump…any advice would be helpful. Also, I would be interested in how you managed to look so trim after loosing 135? ( skin and muscle tone) Thanks for your time.

I’m so happy you opened this up for requests! I’ve always wanted to ask you a few things.

How do you stay consistent in your daily life with the distractions of nights out with friends, dinner dates, travel, drinks, and with the drinking how do you make smart choices when you may be feeling less than stellar the next day? I find myself struggling to stay consistent, especially on weekends which are prime time for socializing. I’ll eat well and exercise during the week and then the weekend comes and it’s a free for all. Would like your thoughts on not living in one extreme or another.

Another thing I would like your thoughts on is motivating a romantic partner to join you in making smart choices-I know you can’t force someone else to want to lose weight, exercise, etc. but how can you encourage in a loving way?

I would love to know how you stayed motivated. I start and by noon, I have “forgotten” I am on a diet. I can’t seem to get fired up to do this any more-Years and years of yo yo dieting. I swear going on a diet was my downfall-after that I’d fall off and gain 5 more each time until now I am 100 lbs over weight!!!!
I also would like to know more about how you ate. I think I see that you developed a “pattern”-eat salads at lunch and always start each meal with a salad and fill up half your plate with veggies and fruits. I don’t see tons of carbs but some are there and you do eat fats-sometimes you eat salad without dressing but other “wet” stuff.-I admire you here-I can’t stand my teeth squeeking without the dressing-LOL!!!!

I love your blog! I really struggle with binge eating and im also a serious yo-yo dieter. I find it hard to have a balanced approach to my food and exercise habits. I would love to reach a healthy weight and stay there! I would love to hear your opinion on my struggles! Thankyou

first I would like to say that I truly admire what you did and how honest you are in sharing your experience with us. A friend introduced me to your blog and a lot of the tips you give have really helped me. Not for a direct weight-loss goal but for a general every-day well-being. Thank you.

But since you asked, there is something that has been bugging me and that I’ve been meaning to ask, and I don’t know how to ask it properly. What I mean is, I’m afraid of you taking it the wrong way (don’t worry, it’s nothing inappropriate).

What i’ve been meaning to ask is why did you go all the way? I’ve seen your before/after pictures (you look gorgeous by the way) and I would like to know why didn’t you stop your weight loss earlier? Why did you need to be skinny? Couldn’t you be ok with yourself with 10 or 15 more pounds on your bones? You don’t need to be skinny to be healthy, and there is a difference between being overweight and being plump or voluptuous (as my friends like to say).

Your rightfully bitch about the image magazines give dieting but what about the image they give women? I think what you did is amazing, you saved yourself and you turned your life around, but did you have to conform to to that skinny-girl image society forces on women? (Have you read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf?)

I insist: I do not mean to be insulting, maybe this is your normal body-weight (and lucky you if it is, really!) but I am a faithful reader and you asked what was on my mind.

Thank you again for sharing your experience with us, you really did help me,

Hi! I really loved your posts about what 2,000/1,600 calories looked like. I’d also love to know what books have inspired you on your journey. I’m also always trying to come up with healthy snacks, so healthy snacking ideas would be awesome! You are a beautiful writer!

i was wondering if you had any moments when you felt like giving up on the weight loss regime cos for me i think that i sabotage any weight loss i have and undo any/all my good work…

what did u do to deter that or were u just that focused and it was never an issue for you? sorry for rambling, but that what i tend to do – I do so well for maybe 2/3 weeks then i have 2/3 BAD weeks and gain everything back… any thoughts???

In my (recovered from anorexia) experience, the binge is prevented by NOT purging (through exercise, starving, or vominting). Sounds backwards, but it works and it’s what I’ve read before too…I think it was in a book called The Eating Disorder Workbook. All the best…

I too would greatly appreciate having the nutritional info posted alongside your recipes. I’d also like to know how you manage portion control when you are cooking? I’m early into my weightloss journey (20 pounds down – 100 more to go) and have a tough time resisting tasting everything as I cook. It (the food) has easier to resist with time (and talking myself off the ledge) but I’m just curious if the inner struggle of wanting to eat to excess ever really goes completely away?

I’m with Laura about the inner struggle of eating to excess. Is it one of those things that goes away with practice and habit? If you’re strong enough to continue to ignore the foods you want but don’t need, does it go away?

I have been reading your blog for about almost a year now and I truly adore it. I want to know how you stayed motivate when you first started to lose weight. I had my daughter a year ago and I can’t seem to lose weight. Well, I lose about 5 pounds and then gain about 10 back. I just feel horrible about myself and eating seems easier then actually sticking to my diet and exercise plan. In my head the weight should just fall off but the reality is that is not the way it works. I can’t seem to stay motivated.

I am new to your blog and I would really like to thank you from the very depths of my heart. Your blog has been a huge help to me in getting a realistic view on myself, weight and food.

I was wondering what your thoughts might be on family who are constantly concerned about the weight of others and encourage weight loss and diets to those in their family who do not have a serious weight problem.

Thank you for all the little things you are doing to make a huge difference in the way people view beauty.

I LOVE your blog. I was wondering, how did people react when you lost weight? Was anyone jealous/sabotaging, or were all your friends, family and coworkers supportive? Sometimes I feel like a couple of my friends were mad when I lost weight because I kind of left them all alone in supersized land, as mean as it sounds. They would make fun of me for getting salads or not having (ok, only having half of) dessert.

Another thing I want to second! I think you said you lost a lot of your weight during/between your junior and senior year of college. What were people’s reactions when you got back to campus? Did some people you didn’t know too well not recognize you? Did you feel peer pressure to overeat from both skinny and bigger friends?

I would like to know some random stuff:
– are you an introvert or extrovert? (I guess introvert…?)
– loose skin – did you have any issues with that?
– what books are you reading?
– nutrition info for recipes
– what podcasts you listen to
– do you ever have nagging “I wish I could lose 5 more lbs” thoughts?

Thanks for asking!!!

Also I read The Power of Now…very interesting! Currently reading The Gift of our Compulsions – would recommend it for sure. It’s along a similar line.

Hi Andie,
A lot of comments have already addressed my questions but I too would love to hear about how your relationships changed with people after your weight loss. Was there jealousy, anger, or even loss of friendships?

Also, in light of your recent post, if it’s not too personal, I would love to know how your family and friends react to your “blue times.” I personally can struggle and get pretty low at times, and it is something that is very hard for my husband to truly grasp and understand because he has never in his life had a depressing thought cross his mind. To him, it is like any other problem that just takes X + Y to solve. Do you have people like this in your life? I actually plan on having him read your post because you put things into words so much better than I ever can.

I’d love to hear about how you stayed motivated, and if you drank alcohol while dieting. I’m a regular, moderate drinker, and I can cut calories all day long, but I can’t seem to give up my cocktails, too. With working, dieting, and exercising, giving up my one indulgence has proven to be impossible (so far). Is it possible to drink and still lose weight? And if so, how?!

I am trying to lose about 200 pounds. I find your recipes helpful, however I am on a really tight budget. I was wondering if you could maybe do a little series on cheap meals that are still healthy. I find myself eating the same things all of the time because I can’t figure out how to get more meals in on my budget. Thank you!

If you do weigh yourself regularly (at least weekly); have you ever gained any number of pounds back? If so, how did you handle it? Do you get back into a exercise regiment or “diet plan”?

I’m struggling with a 5-7 weight gain. I’m just disappointed when I see pictures of myself from last summer. It’s not JUST the number on the scale, it’s not being as toned. I’m also 5’3 so there is no place for any pound to hide!

Love your blog, you’re truly inspiring. :) I’m currently trying to get my size down a bit with a bit of a restrictive diet/cleanse to lose more fat quickly, then slowly start reintroducing sugars/carbs and trying to maintain the lower weight. The maintenance part scares me a bit because I don’t want to gain back what I’ve lost but I also don’t want to restrict myself too much where food isn’t fun anymore (I love cooking!).

If you have any more tips/ideas ingredients you can substitute to keep down calories, how to spice up my salads, or just maintenance in general and how you’re doing with it, I’d love to hear more.

I really like your “salad with every meal” ritual and I’ve recently adopted it as well. I’m finding I’m getting bored of some spices/dressings so I need to venture out and find/create new flavours to keep my salads exciting.

Anyways, love the blog, your writing, your stories, you’re terrific! Without stumbling upon your site, I may not have had the motivation to start losing that extra bit of weight that’s been kicking around for the last few years.

Hey Andie – First of all, love this blog. I have been reading for the last few months and found great comfort in your honesty and can relate to so many of your posts. I would love to see the nutritional info for your recipes and what a “serving” is.

I love your writing and will read what you put out there, but there are specific things I think you could probably share that would be really meaningful.

Maintaining weight. Dealing with the fear that looms behind every successful weight loss which is gaining it all back. How you learned to retool your thoughts about food. Most people aren’t struggling with food or excess weight b/c they just eat to much, it’s what we use food to do for us. Numb our feelings, reduce stress, etc. How have you handled these challenges or do you have them. How people react to the thinner you, what they say, the naysayers, those that try to sabotage you.

My dad’s overweight due to beer and unhealthy snacking. It’s caused him sleep apnea and he’s been using a CPAP for a couple years now. He also has a weak back and weak knees because of his weight. He knows he’s overweight, his doctors tell him to lose weight, but I don’t think he sees how serious this is. He’s so convinced that he can’t commit and limit his beers and quit unhealthy snacking.

How can I motivate my dad to make a lifestyle change? Watching the way he snacks, I’ve also developed a relationship with food. Whenever I get stressed out or catch a cold (basically if I feel at all down, physically or mentally) I use food to make myself feel better.

I’m new to your site so I’m not sure if you’ve answered this question before but I’m really interested in knowing how you got/stayed motivated at the beginning of your weight loss. I’m currently at the heaviest I’ve ever been and I feel overwhelmed it. It’s crushing me, literally and figuratively. I need to make a big change, but I feel like I’m so far behind the starting line that I’ll never get there.
Your writing is so beautiful, and I feel like I’m reading about myself when you talk about how you were always big and your love of food. I too consider myself a foodie. I know so much about healthy choices, and feel like I do my best to make them but I do not see these choices reflected in my body.

I would love if you could expand on your grocery shopping and experiences with local markets and food co ops. As a young adult with a husband in grad school I find it overwhelming to eat a wholesome menu with a student budget. So much of living well and eating healthy is based upon a budget and learning all the tricks of the trade to eating well. I find we are doing well, but would love to hear your input! I just adore this blog.

(my best friend’s name is Andie so I have always been a lover of all the Andies!)

Andrea, I just found your blog this week. The way you write and express yourself is inspiring. I loved reading about your journey to getting your “outter” self to where you want to be (because your inner self was already beautiful… and let’s face it… your outter self too!).

Reading about the journey, making peace with food, and your exercise history was great. But for me (and maybe I need to re-read) I am a little confused. You made peace with food and allow yourself treats. You made peace with exercise and don’t have to work out 100 hours a week. So WHAT is it that you would recommend changing? I would LOVE to hear what you think about what kinds of commitments you do hold yourself to… and which splurges you make – but in what amount and in what frequency? They say the devil’s in the details, and I think I may be sabotaging myself in the details in huge ways. Since you are so eloquent, I’d love to hear your take.

Many thanks for baring your soul to the internet. So many of us are better for it! :)

I’d like to know how you and others deal with your feelings when you stop overeating. I also suffer from depression, and my dad was hospitalized for it more than once when I was a child. Before I met my husband, I drank, quite a lot (another thing I got from my dad), but I still worked successfully full-time. I also worked out at least six days each week. I looked pretty hot, though I didn’t know it then. I am more together than I was then, but now I stuff my feelings. I need to learn to deal with them without overindulging in food or alcohol or anything unhealthy.

Did you ever fear that you would not succeed in losing the weight? I also worry about failing to be beautiful and not losing the weight if I try hard. I think this might be what makes me stop dieting when I see the beginning of results. I feel so sorry for my husband and my family that I am not all that they deserve.

Thanks for your honesty, your wonderful treatment of all of us, and for keeping us so in touch with your life.

One hurdle that I have found is I have found that many of my friends and coworkers are not healthy eaters, and tease me (jokingly) when I eat well or stay in for lunch. They even offer to buy my lunch if I just go to a fast food restaurant, and imply that it’s rude if I don’t go. I don’t think they are being intentionally insensitive, but it’s difficult to say no over and over.

Did you also encounter pressure from friends/family/coworkers to not be healthy? I don’t particularly want to switch jobs or find all new friends; I think the ones I have would be understanding if I could articulate my wants correctly. How do you explain to people that you are being healthy when “no, thank you, I’m being healthy” isn’t enough?

Reading through the comments, it seems to me that it would be good if you expanded on the idea of intuitive eating. If I’ve read you correctly, you said you have evolved to eating intuitively, which is why you don’t focus on numbers so much anymore.

So many of the questions and struggles that are being mentioned here can be answered with the intuitive eating method outlined in the book Intuitive Eating by Tribole and Resch. I highly recommend that all of you read that book if you haven’t already.

I too love everything you write and am (not so)
patiently awaiting your book. I would like to hear your side on staying motivated, varying your workout & how to continue to progress in your fitness/healthy living goals. Thanks, and stay you!!

I think a few people have covered this question, but I struggle with extremes. You talk a lot about balance. And ironically, I’m newly pregnant right now and for the first time in a long time and figuring out balance because my “body voice” is much louder than my “mind voice” right now.
Normally, however, I’m restricting a little, over-doing a lot, bouncing back and forth. I have a healthy weight, but struggle with obsession/all or nothing/ etc.
Did meds ever help you to lose your food thoughts? Or was it just changing your way of thinking?
Do you ever self-sabotage? Like feel lonely and find yourself at the bottom of a Ben & Jerry’s tub. Or are those days of the past?
I love EVERYTHING you write, as well, so it will be read.
You are an example of savoring and enjoying life and treating yourself with the utmost respect.
xo

You seem to have moved around a fair amount and dabbled in a variety of things. Perhaps one for more of an early-20’s crowd trying to figure out the next steps in life? Like moving to new cities, finding new jobs, why you made certain moves in life, etc? Just a thought….

I love all of your writing. I can’t wait for your book to come out. Even though many of your struggles (like the weight loss, the post about your father, etc.) don’t apply directly to my life, the underlying messages resonates with me and can be applied in many other directions. So thank you, for all your thought provoking posts and every piece of who you are that you share with us.

Hi, Andie. I was in Whites Bakery today in Brockton, MA and thought of you, which I know is random coming from an anonymous comment on your blog. But anyway…

When I first discovered reading your blog I read the entire thing backwards until I reached the beginning. I love how inspired it was (& still is) and I’m looking forward to reading more of your words. I have two huge blocks for weight loss and they’re both mental. If you could write about either of these, that would be awesome.

The first one is, I feel as if I almost have a fear of being hungry. I find myself over eating sometimes just so I know I won’t be looking for something else to eat as soon as hunger pains hit (which are often followed by crankiness and headaches both signs of low blood sugar). Did you deal with that while you were losing weight? Was there something you ate to avoid that or something you did to get your mind off the hunger? (even if it wasn’t real hunger?)

Really my biggest problem is getting my mind in the game and deciding to do this. I feel like food is a huge comfort for me, and if I’m craving that sort of comfort I start to feel bad for myself because I “can’t” have whatever it is that I want. I hope this makes sense. Are there non-food related things that you find comforting, and if so how were you able to make this transition? I think really a person just needs to do it, but it’s not really that easy…

Also! Are there any blogs that you read frequently that you could suggest to your readers? I love seeking out new blogs

Thanks for posting the links to “living with a fat dad”. I am married to a man who is 400 lbs, and we have tried weight watchers and southbeach. We don’t have kids yet, but I don’t want my kids to grow up in a diet household. So I would love your thoughts on how I can support my husband, help him develop healthy habits, while creating good food for myself and our future children. I feel a little like the mom in that article, who was not interested in cooking homemade food because she was rebelling against her mom. My mom has cooked a homemade meal every day of her life, and I find myself struggling to keep that up. Any thoughts on how we can embrace cooking for nourishment and not view it as something our mom’s told us we had to do :) You have a great blog, and I am excited for your book!

How you relate to other people… do you have a conversation with a boyfriend about how you secretly ate 3 supersize orders of fries in the car and then hid the trash? Do you talk with friends about how you can’t be that person who goes out and gleefully orders 5 different fried appetizers (which they totally suggest, but you end up eating most of). What you say/how you feel when someone notices that you’ve lost weight.
These are the areas that I find the most interesting — the interaction and dynamics that we have with other people.

Could you please add a “Pin it” button, for those who use Pinterest. There are many things I would like to pin so I can go back and reference them in the future. Thank you so much for writing the best blog ever!!!

I loved reading what I miss from 135 pounds ago. I’ve lost 90 and regained fifty. I have to get back to goal, anything you write is awesome, but I want to know what clicked, what changed and how you KEPT THE CLICK. Xoxoxo you’re awesome. Will your book be a good book club book? I’m anxious to share you with my friends :)
Theresa

I am new to your blog – really love it – I am also a cook/baker and equate love with MORE especially calories. SO during a time of grief (my beloved died two months ago) I have decided to knock myself off balance a little more and LOSE WEIGHT.
Could you post a typical page of your food journal? Do you list each food, quantity, how you felt when you ate it (always a stupid category to me) and calories/nutritional info? Do you just write “breakfast – 280 cals”? I obsess over the details (which helps me ignore the elephant in the room!)

I was hoping you could tell me HOW IN THE WORLD you managed to give up desserts for a year while you lost weight? I have a lot to lose (56 more pounds, actually) and the thought of giving up desserts for 6-12 months makes me just…horribly upset? Emotional? The very idea of giving up baked goods makes me want to binge on them. It’s awful. So how…HOW…did you do it?

I know this is highly personal, but I would love to hear your thoughts about loose skin and body image issues.
I have lost 110 so far and am dealing with a lot of loose skin, and I feel like this is causing me to have a very negative body image, and even when people tell me I look good I still feel very insecure. Did you struggle with this? How did you deal/cope with it? I think it would be so helpful to so many of us to hear your thoughts on this issue.

I have just started following your blog and I’m a huge fan. One thing I would like you to address is how you dealt with the attention you get since losing the weight. I ask because I have always been a shy, chubby girl. I have lost weight a few times and have noticed each time that I got more male attention. I never knew how to deal with it and attracting that attention always scared me and made me actually miss my fat self when I was invisible. Unfortunately I have gained all my weight back after having a baby, but I am on track to lose it yet again. Just wondering how you dealt/ deal with the male attention you attract (because I know a beautiful girl like you turns heads on the daily)