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Monday, April 17, 2006

Shocking Midwest Discovery Sheds More Light!

Another astounding find

This representation, based on the evidence, is further proof that both sea-dwelling mammals such as seals and also flying squirrels evolved from dogs. Scientists had speculated that seals (which, of course, bark) may have evolved from dogs but the flipper exhibited by this specimen may have possibly been the forerunner of a skin connection between the legs.

Note how the fur seems to be getting shorter as one views the back of the specimen. Another dog-to-seal clue?

Scientists speculate that this animal may also be the progenitor of the Teddy Bear.

The most exciting find, however, is the capelike covering beginning at the neck and extending all the way to the tail. If this did evolve into an actual cape, then this is the first transitional form between dogs and superheroes. Did Bark Dog precede Bat Man? Is this the first change from soup bones to Superman? Golly gee!

Evidence indicates that these creatures were known to congregate around food dishes and the eating areas of people. Could a food dish have overturned, trapping this specimen for posterity? No one knows for sure, but now scientists plan years of research to discern all the answers.

7 comments:

I will admit my subterfuge. This is actually Tonga the Chow, a living dog born with a flipper for a foot and trimmed for the coming warm season. Why my wife wanted to put a shawl on a dog I have no idea. It does make a pretty funny picture, though.

I apologize to all who were excited at the possibility of a dog-Superman transitional form.

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The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.Francis Maitland Balfour