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An Emotional Assistant and Moving Sticker Giveaway

Short of any naughtiness, what does a girl need to do in order to attend oil and gas conferences full-time? This is the life! Other than the fact that my hotel room faces the freeway and overlooks a Denny’s rather than the river walk on the other side, things are sa-wanky!

Do you know where I ate dinner last night? Do you? In a wine cellar. A wine cellar. I sat at a round table with six male engineers and thankfully I never had to pull out the “Oh I know – Right!?” because none of them expected me to understand engineering principles and such. When those conversations fizzled (and what could you expect?) and the engineers didn’t know what to do, I saved the day and asked every single person how they met their wife and what kind of dog do they have and how old their kids are and what do they do for fun? This assistant knows how to ask questions. You like to make homemade beer? Tell me about your homemade beer! Does your wife drink the beer? Are you enjoying dessert? Because I see we ordered the same one. How do you find the hazelnuts? Perfectly toasted?

I haven’t managed to pass out one business card though. Turns out many of these engineers are not from Texas, and well, when it comes to me bringing the Bosses some loans, I kind of need to stick to the state in which they are licensed. I don’t know though, people. At this point I’m about willing to offer someone a loan on Jupiter. Come on. Why can’t I just bring them ONE loan?

Maybe I’m not cut out for this job. Do you think anyone is hiring for a “Fancy Oil and Gas Conference Permanent Attendee that doesn’t have to go to the Meetings During the Day, but Dines in Wine Cellars at Night” position? Because I’d be perfect!

I think I need to go to the pool and have a good cry. “He- Here’s m-my business ca-card –SOB!”

“Honey are you alright?”

“I’m f-f-fine…and do you need a hoooome loan – SOB!”

Or maybe I should just stay up here in the hotel room with the curtains drawn and the “leave me alone if you know what’s good for you and take a business card that I’ve place on the floor here” sign on the door?

Oh no, folks. Do you think I’m becoming the angry assistant? You know you’ve met one. They are snarky toward their boss and they police the thermostat and if someone asks them to make a copy they start talking about medical issues?

I definitely need to chill out. Do you think wine cellars open before noon? Like, you know, if I just wanted to go take a peek at it again?

Before I do that, I would like to announce a giveaway. Isn’t that fun? Here’s the scoop. I have super cute moving stickers that eliminate the need for using dried out markers to label your moving boxes. I used them when I moved last and found myself singing Mary Poppins’ songs as I packed and then a flock of butterflies followed the moving truck.

My giveaway is super easy. E-mail me your address, and I will mail you a pack!

Now, I’m off to oscillate between friendly assistant and angry assistant in the wine cellar. Cheers!