If I’m living with unconfessed sin and I try to sit down, stop, and focus my thoughts on my breathing, inevitably my mind goes straight to the sin, to the blight on my soul. No matter how hard I try, my mind won’t be still. It’s agitated and worried about the sin. It’s worried about my relationship with God, about God’s pending wrath I’m flippantly ignoring. If I ignore those feelings, then I have to find something else to distract my mind from the sin. I can’t sit still without the weight crushing me. Imagine, sitting alone, with just my thoughts, and just my sin. I shudder. Basically hell. So to get away from myself (and away from God) I’ll usually go play video games, go for a walk, or heaven forbid, go sin some more. Anything but being forced to deal with it. But deal with it you should.

The answer is to go to God in prayer. Prayer is deeper than meditation. The very first thing that will come up in your mind is the unconfessed sin. And you will repent and be forgiven right then and there. You can’t move forward until you do.

You can try to ignore it, and try to pray about other things.”I’m OK God. Let’s not bring that up. Here’s what I really wanted to talk to you about…”

If you try to run you will invite into your life a blindness, a wasting oppression, a willful ignorance that will only further separate you from God. You’ll think you’re good with God, but you’ll be walking alone.

Turn and repent, and feel the true freedom, the overwhelming joy, the utter relief of releasing yourself to God’s will. And be able to experience a still, quiet mind once again.