Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -
Wow! What a ride!

i think the greatest loverelation is were you can be your total self,and respect and love the other for who he/she is not what you think they can become.
the not feign affection i find hard,in your life you will have to deal with people you dont like but i feel it like a social duty to be nice to them(there is the live and let live thing again).
greetings,
es

Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -

I never feign affection. If I hug someone, it's because I genuinely feel affection for that person. I don't push someone away for hugging me too soon, like the first time you meet them, but it feels artificial and uncomfortable --they're invading my comfort space. I also hate to go with the crowd just because. I'm almost stubbornly contrary just to assert my individuality!
Being yourself and loving yourself might be the single most important component to the entire Desiderata, I believe it's the basis for being able to come out of yourself and accept the good in the world, and that can never make you feel cynical about love.

deppraved wrote:Being yourself and loving yourself might be the single most important component to the entire Desiderata, I believe it's the basis for being able to come out of yourself and accept the good in the world, and that can never make you feel cynical about love.

True, Deppraved. If you don't love yourself, it follows that you would not expect love from others. However, I think you can love yourself and still be cynical about love. In fact, being cynical is a way of protecting yourself. On the other hand, I believe that those who love themselves are happier people and are more open to the possibility of goodness in others.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.

That pretty much sums it up DITHOT. I agree Liz that to love others, you must first love yourself. If you don't feel worthy of love, it's hard to accept love from others or to love them back.I also agree and understand deppraved about "fake hugs" from people you really don't know. Kind of like saying "how are you?" or "have a nice day" automatically without really meaning anything by it. On the other hand, making eye contact and giving a smile with either of those comments can make a difference in someone's day I think. A moment of human connection, however brief, can sometimes give a stranger a lift that's much needed.

"So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself, who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on the shore and merely existed." ~HST~

luvdepp wrote:I also agree and understand deppraved about "fake hugs" from people you really don't know. Kind of like saying "how are you?" or "have a nice day" automatically without really meaning anything by it. On the other hand, making eye contact and giving a smile with either of those comments can make a difference in someone's day I think. A moment of human connection, however brief, can sometimes give a stranger a lift that's much needed.[/b]

I agree, Luvdepp. And I never really thought much about that until my father pointed out to me when he moved to the Eureka area that strangers were so friendly. Everyone he passed on the street had such a nice smile or nod for him. He wasn't used to that in the big city. I know it lifted his spirits. Ever since he mentioned that, I've made more of a concerted effort to do the same.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

The only thing that matters is the ending. It's the most important part of the story.

Someone in a previous thread said negativity breeds negativity, or something to that effect. I think when you have negative feelings about yourself you look for negativity in others, maybe to validate your own feelings? People in general in Texas are very friendly. It's rare to pass someone on the street or in a store and not make eye contact and smile or nod. (Kind of like the Indian head waggle... )

Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -

I was born in Birmingham, which is a big industrial city about in the middle of England. I now live on the south coast - people here are a lot less friendly and approachable than up north...people do not acknowledge you in the street or strike up conversation, they are very insular and it's been hard to make friends, even after 6 years! Their sense of humour, attitudes, everything is different! I'm not disrespecting them for that, but I do think it is a problem...people need to reach out to others more, I don't think we were given arms to keep others at a safe distance!

Very often I'm struck by how a person can appear cold and unapproachable, but when you strike up a conversation they immediately come out of themselves and prove to need just as much contact as you! It's like everybody's afraid of intimacy!

Love is the most important thing in the world. Love will always win over hate - that is why all wars end eventually.

"Easy on the goods darlin!""Tis not an easy thing to be entirely happy, but to be kind is very easy, and that is the greatest measure of happiness"-John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester

There is no more powerful force than Love. It will sneak in your heart when you least expect it and in many guises. You see it in the innocence of a child, and it's what blankets hope, bringing people together in good times and in bad. It is music and the ring of church bells that carries peace, and, in a whispered truth, it heals. Love is a gift, a birthright to experience and share. It is in the All Good that is the universe and quark. The beautiful thing about Love is that no matter what form it takes, it is felt, absorbed and radiates back in multiples. Be yourself and have faith, for within, is perfect love and perfect trust.

~ MAGICK HAPPENS ~Through the years, for the many xoxo's, giggles & kindness...thank you & love you Johnny.

As far as being yourself..........I am still trying to figure out what that is! But I am trying. I think it is a never ending process of discovering who you are and I have been enjoying the ride as of late.

It is a real effort not to be cynical about love when you have been tricked in the past. There is a lesson to be learned when meeting people.......listen to your heart. If you get any warning signals.....listen to them. That's not being cynical, that's being careful. I would love to trust people right off the bat, but I have learned you can't do that. I love love and would like it in my life again.

Great discussion ladies!!!

"In the time of your life, live....so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but shall smile to the infinite delight and mystery of it." Saroyan

I love what everyone's said so far, and Deppraved, I think you said it especially well. The whole idea of the poem is to maintain peace: for the reader, the human to be able to be at peace with themselves, and also that when you read it, you will be at peace; it's just dang peaceful.

I love the Beatles quote as well, "Love is all there is." So true. Just like in Don Juan, the only four questions of value in life (what is sacred, of what is the spirit made, what is worth living for, and what is worth dying for) all have the same answer -- only love.

I think the poem is also saying how even though people can tend to make love seem cynical, and seem false and hopeless, you shouldn't believe them. You must always remember and know that love is "perennial as the grass," that it is the only thing that is true, no matter what or who may try and make it seem less.

I also agree with ya'll about people sometimes being cold, but just by saying "how are you" you can really brighten them up. I probably am one of those people who automatically says, "have a nice day," "how are you," etc, but I think it's a good habit to be in. Even though it may seem too forced or habitual at times, I still always try and say it because I know that sometimes there are those people who say it back to you, and they really mean it, because they wouldn't have said it otherwise, because no one else had said it to them. (Does that make sense? sorry for confusing wording )

Anyway, I think it's basically just saying how important it is to truly believe in love, and to do so forever, no matter what happens to you or what people say. I love reading everyone's responses to this, and thanks again for hosting these great discussions about a magnificent poem.

gypsylee wrote: As far as being yourself..........I am still trying to figure out what that is! But I am trying. I think it is a never ending process of discovering who you are and I have been enjoying the ride as of late.

It is a real effort not to be cynical about love when you have been tricked in the past. There is a lesson to be learned when meeting people.......listen to your heart. If you get any warning signals.....listen to them. That's not being cynical, that's being careful. I would love to trust people right off the bat, but I have learned you can't do that. I love love and would like it in my life again.

Great discussion ladies!!!

gypsylee, I'm not sure we ever figure that out completely! I agree the process is well worth the ride and the effort. And you are right about love, trust your instincts. Most execellent discussion!

Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming -

Sorry for interrupting the topic a bit, but I was wondering where we ever found out about Johnny liking this poem anyway? I know DITHOT or Liz posted it sometime recently, about why Johnny likes the poem so much, but I can't remember what he said, or where that quote is...