Wednesday, November 5, 2008

4 years ago today, I woke up like I did the previous 76 days -- in a hospital bed. My c-section date had been set for November 18th. 4 years ago November 5th was a Friday. I hadn't had a detailed sonogram for more than 2 weeks which was not the normal but things had been crazy that week with 2 sets of twins born prematurely, then the quads were delivered that week too. So I kind of got forgotten about. I asked that morning about another steroid shot to develop the baby's lungs and got one. I also questioned about a sonogram. Normally they were only done on the weekdays so my next chance was 3 days away. Good thing for the reminder. I was always happy to see the babies and in detailed sonograms, the babies were measured for projected weights. I liked seeing the progression. There was a med student there to watch the process which was the norm in my hospital. Addison was first. Then came Ethan. Everything seemed fine but Caden's time went fast and his weight didn't go up. The sonographer left to go tell the doctor we were done and I waited with the med student . . . and we waited more . . . and then even longer. I knew something was wrong. It doesn't take that long to call the doctor to tell him that he needs to come up and look at the babies himself. Finally he arrived. He did his observations and then put his hand on mine and said "I don't' want to alarm you but we need to deliver you today" and he proceeded to tell me that it appeared that Ethan had fluid around his heart. He needed to come out now. I was excited and ready. The words hadn't really sunk in until I had to call people. I called Aaron to tell him to get to the hospital. He was two hours away. Actually I had to call him back a second time when I told him it was time to come because he was excited and got off the phone before I could tell him the news about Ethan. I called my two sisters too and it was hard to say out loud that something was not right. My friend, Sonia, had planned on coming to visit me this day and she arrived. I really didn't have too much time to get nervous about the surgery -- time flew. Of course, Aaron still wasn't there, my sister, Monica came and I asked her if she would go in the delivery room with me. The doctor said we couldn't wait any longer. It all happened so quickly. Addison was born and there was a little kitten cry. Ethan came next and there was a lot of commotion with him, and when Caden came last I felt such relief because he was so big at almost 4 pounds. I got to kiss Addison and she looked good. Aaron arrived and got to go with the kids to the NICU. I was left to recover and then moved to my regular room where I had to spend the next 13 hours unable to move off my left side because my blood pressure sky-rocketed. It took a while to get it stabilized. The hardest things I ever had to do was lay and wait and wonder to see those babies that I had wanted for so long, that I had worked so hard for, that we had gone through so many procedures and tests, and that I had worried and prayed for every moment of this scary pregnancy. Aaron brought these photos:

Caden, 3.15 lbs

Ethan, 2.6 pounds

Addison, 3.8 pounds

Shocking, maybe to some of you. I was prepared for it; it was all I had for 13 hours. I studied them and studied them. I sent Aaron down to come back and report. Finally at about 1 am they reluctantly let me go down to see them. I fell in love with those babies. They looked bigger in person, that is if 2 and 3 pound babies can look big! Then it was real. They were real. There were a lot of ups and downs in the days, weeks, and months ahead. The photos got scarier:

More machines added for Ethan and more questions as to what was wrong.

Addison needed chest tubes and a ventilator.

Mixed in with all that scary stuff they was great moments like this:

The NICU is not a place to catch your breath so it wasn't long and we had this at home:

while Ethan spent the next 4 weeks in the hospital where I went to visit him every weekday morning and Aaron visited him on the weekends. It was so hard to have 2 preemies at home and another struggling in the NICU over an hour away. Every day I when I woke up I said I wasn't going to go -- I was too tired, too overwhelmed, too everything, but I did because I needed to see him and he needed to see me.

After 5-1/2 weeks, Ethan joined us all at home where our arms and hearts were full.

I wish I remembered more of this time of their life -- but I don't -- it's probably the why I stayed mostly sane. At least I have photos even if the memories are foggy or non-existent

Even though the times with triplets continues to be a roller coaster of ups and downs and downright stressful so much of the time, we wouldn't change one moment of it all. We've had 4 years of fun

2 comments:

OK! Let me wipe the tears before I comment! Geesh! What a true blessing you have in your 3 wonderful, beautiful, vivacious children! You are such an awesome family. Be Proud, Mommy Murray! We love 'em! Happy 4th Birthday!