NO! NOT RITZ. My wife commented last night, ere yet this post wax up, that you can't substitute similar crackers for Ritz, and I heartily agree. At times I indeed may want saltines, but when a guy wants a Ritz, only a Ritz will do. I have spoken.

A Ritz is so Ritzy. What's not to like? All popular patented names are prone to become general names. All soft drinks are cokes to so many of us. After a while the manufacturer loses his exclusive rights to a name.

In case anyone wanted to know the origin of Ritz Crackers,here's a tidbit:

"According to Corinne Cook in a July 2009 article for The Advocate, Nabisco introduced Ritz Crackers in 1934. The name "Ritz" was chosen to conjure up images of the Ritz-Carlton hotel in Boston, Massachusetts and "to suggest that (sic) the cracker's rich flavor."

When we say Ritz, most Americans think about the wonderful Nabisco cracker. César Ritz created luxury hotels and gave them his name. This was mostly in the 1800s, perhaps the Gay Nineties. Ritz and ritzy became synonymous with people who think they are the crème de la crème. When people of a lower level ape their "superiors", they may be "Puttin' on the Ritz." So ritz comes to us with both good and bad connotations.

By the way, I don't think English people say cracker. What is the word for cracker in British English?

I find biscuit an interesting word. Neither British or American biscuits bear resemblance to their Old French ancestor which was "twice baked". I assume, but don't know, that meant toasted bread. Compare the German Zweiback. There is a Gerber product by that name and it is just toast.

I find the name of baked goods in England and America amusing. We all have biscuits, buns, rolls, muffins, cakes, etc. but they don't always mean the same things. England has crumpets and scones. We do not have them in America. We Americans have English Muffins that are not English and are not muffins. The British aren’t much into donuts, the second most deadly food in the American diet. I have never seen an IHOP in England. My family has always called a specific cookie a teacake. I think it comes to us from the British teacake. I have never heard any American outside my family call a sugar cookie a teacake. Is French toast toast? Is it French? Are you allowed to say French toast in France. I know the answer to that. it is no.

Recently, "You are toast." has taken on a new meaning.

I pity the poor non-Redneck, wherever he may hail from, who doesn't know the delights of cracklin' bread.

Teacakes are common in LOuisiana. (I hate having to write out Louisiana to avoid confusion with Los Angeles!) They refer to a soft cookie I don't particularly prefer.

What do you British call those things we call biscuits, made of flour, baking powder, and or soda, milk (preferably butter milk), and shortening? Usually sliced and buttered, but can be sliced and covered with gravy.

A fine point: American biscuits are not sliced they are split. Loaves of bread are sliced. American biscuits are better than sliced bread. I am not so sure the British have these biscuits. The American biscuit isn't a scone and it isn't a crumpet, both wonderful quick breads. One of our British friends can probably give us a definitive answer. To American friends, what is a cathead biscuit?