There was a young lady from Hitchen
Who was scratching her ( Self ) In the kitchen.
Her Mother said " Rose, crabs I suppose "
She said " ( Knickers ), get on with your knitting "
.
There was a young fellow from Stroud
Who was ( Fondling ) his girl in a crowd
A man at the front said " I smell (something) "
Right out loud.
( Please feel free to amend any words enclosed in brackets ).