Looking for the light !!

Hello all! I am a mother of 4 children some of which are more difficult then others,I have a daughter nearly 16 typical in most ways,son number one 10 yrs old very cooperative and pleasing,sometimes my saving grace,my 8yr old son well he is a functioning autistic with alot of issues,and last but not least my 7 yr old son who seems to be a different child at home then school and is usally the reason for most of tears these days,the reason when my phone rings I cringe and tighen up til I realize it was'nt the school this time or YET!! Everyday for some months now I get phone calls about the behaviour of my youngest child who is being paint as a difficult child and has no boundries at school listens to no rules,no teacher and has everyone there upset frustrated and is suffering in education and social skills.I am so frustrated that I cry have no where left to turn,accidently found this page by looking for home schooling as a last resort to help son pass grades and maybe keep him form public scruitney I am at wit's end with school and staff,who seem to push him over the edge til he runs away form them thru school,or kicks adults in his way,throws chairs and items at arms reach,yelling and full out defiance to any requests.Then I get a phone call telling me of the situation and await his arravial at home via taxi for the day.Another day wasted with out educational structure no learning.
I am 35 with my own medical issues I have chrone's and ulcertive diesease
husband is 36 and works hard also not biological father of any of the children,nor does he have any of his own.Remains steady by my side and seems to have more patience then a doctor's office.
In this house there are two mini shitzu_poodles 10 months old that are also a pain the from time to time,thankfully my female pup FOOFOO is always there to cuddle and dry my tears!! Hence my name here Plate's_Full

<span style='font-size: 11pt'>Hello Plate's full and welcome. I'm sorry to hear you are struggling with more than one issue here.
-Has your 7yr old had an evaluation to see if there is a reason for his behavior?
-Does he have any learning disabilities?
-Does he tell you why he is disruptive in school?
-Is this new behavior or has he always been this way?
-Has anything happened lately that would have triggered this behavior?
-Any family history of behavior problems, learning disabilities or developmental delays?

I have more questions than answers unfortunately. I wanted to suggest you do a profile signature. The directions are found on the faq/board help forum. You will also find the board abbreviations and how to navigate the site. I hope we can share some of our experiences and help you along on this very challenging journey.</span>

Your son is about the age mine was when he started having rages at school. But, we never saw that type of behavior or intensity at home (still haven't).

It would appear that you son needs a full evaluation - SOON. Has he been evaluated? Does he have a diagnosis? Is he on medications? As Fran said, when new posters come, we usually have a lot of questions first. That's why it is important to do a signature profile with that kind of information included.

Regardless, your son needs some help, and so do you. Who diagnosis'd your other son with autism? Perhaps you could start there. I would, were I in your shoes, set up an appointment with a pediatric neuropsyc or call the local teaching hospital and make an appointment for a multidisciplinary evaluation.

All this takes time. In the meantime, see if you can find out wht the triggers are for your son. Talk to the school, his teacher, etc., and find out if there are any specific times of the day, certain acedemic areas, particular social requests, etc., that trigger his behavior. I'm sure, with a closer look, they can find some common ground. I'm suprised that the school has not held a meeting to do a Functional Behavior Analysis on your son. It really investigates the "triggers" for uncontrolled behaviors. Perhaps you could request your school's team meet to complete a FBA. Send them a certified letter requesting such.

The result of the FBA is called a BIP (Behavior Intervention Plan). This plan sets forth strategies for avoiding the outbursts and behaviors, but also sets forth things to do when they happen. And, make sure they put some positive reinforcers in there as well.

Look forward to hearing more about your son and what action comes next.