Sunday, September 16, 2007

It's time for the Emmys, the awards show that's more fun than the Oscars but less trashy than the MTV Video Music Awards. We're liveblogging the ceremony from AP World Headquarters in New York. Keep clicking refresh all night long as we provide catty comments and insights on McEmmys' winners, losers, presenters, acceptance speeches and suspiciously spontaneous moments.

11:13 p.m. The credits are rolling — and we're rolling to bed.

11:10 p.m. Whoa. "The Sopranos" for Best Drama? Now there's
an, um, whatever the opposite of upset might be. That savvy David Chase
used his fleeting moments to spoof Sally Field's speech. Nice.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

11:04 p.m. Whoa. "30 Rock" for Best Comedy? Now there's an
upset. Best thank of the night goes to Tiny Fey for acknowledging the
show's "dozens and dozens" of viewers.

10:58 p.m. It's getting nasty backstage. We're not talking
about catfights. asap reporter Chelsea J. Carter just IMed us another
tidbit: "Some ol' lady just asked Tony Bennett if he liked older women.
And he said, 'Only when I have Viagra.'"

10:57 p.m. Oh, James Spader. You rascal. At least you didn't have an obstructed view!

10:55 p.m. We're getting a question IMed to us from asap
reporter Chelsea J. Carter, who's actually backstage at the ceremony.
She wonders: "It's supposed to be the green Emmys, so how come they are serving organic food in plastic containers with plastic utensils?"

10:51 p.m. Revenge is sweet. Despite having to look at
everyone's booty all night, America Ferrara wins the Lead Actress in a
Comedy Series statue for "Ugly Betty."

10:47 p.m. The biggest shocker during the cloudy tribute montage: Tom Poston. We had no idea George from "Newhart" died this year. We have to tell our brother Darryl and our other brother Darryl.

10:43 p.m. Sally Field dedicates her trophy to the mothers of
the world and then says something that gets censored. We have a feeling
it wasn't "You like me. You really, really like me."

10:37 p.m. "Ricky Gervais couldn't be here tonight, so we're
going to give this to our friend, Steve Carrell." Leave it to Jon
Stewart and Stephen Colbert to induce a gut-hurting laugh after their
so-not-funny bit about the ceremony going green.

10:26 p.m. That Kayne West vs. Rainn Wilson "Don't Forget the
Lyrics" bit was cute. Hopefully, he has another freak-out backstage. So
is "Amazing Race" the most unstoppable Emmy competitor ever? And just
how many people does it take to produce that show? Wowie zowie. That
was a "Sopranos"-like crew.

10:24 p.m. Ryan Seacrest in a getup from "The Tudors" and a gay joke. Both not funny.

10:21 p.m. We just popped some popcorn. Did we miss anything?

10:09 p.m. Are we getting sleepy? Brad Garrett and Joley Richardson — who's cleavage should've been nominated for something — just gave Tony Bennett another Emmy. This is supposed to be the award show for TV stars, not musicians.

10:04 p.m. Did we just see Masi Oka chatting online with Tom
from MySpace who presented the first interactive Emmy award to Al
Gore's Current channel, which then spawned a standing ovation for Gore?
Overload. Overload. Overload.

9:54 p.m. We would love to see someone like Lewis Black (or
Kathy Griffin) host an awards show and not just be slotted for a
quickie monologue or presenting gig. Come to think of it, Ryan has been
pretty invisible (and, thusly, not annoying) during this year's
ceremony.

9:50 p.m. Helen Mirren didn't drop the t-word this year, but she did totally challenge the Emmy orchestra.

9:49 p.m. Hey, it's not just Hayden from "Heroes" getting the
dirty looks. Sally Field totally shot one at McDreamy. Hollywood is so
sleazy.

9:40 p.m. What a baaad idea for a musical number. What do the
"Jersey Boys" have to do with "The Sopranos," outside of the Garden
State connection? That bebop pop juxtaposed with "Sopranos" imagery was
bizarre at best. Couldn't the "Jersey Boys" have at least sung "Woke Up
This Morning" or something?

9:30 p.m. Ugh. Just when we thought this awards show was
chugging forward, along comes Dick Askin to muck it up by honoring TV's
charitable efforts.

9:23 p.m. Jon Stewart slays us with a joke about the "Ugly Betty" folks getting the shaft with their butt-view seating assignment.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

9:16 p.m. David Chase of "The Sopranos" wins for best drama
writing. You'd think he'd use this opportunity to explain that
much-talked-about ending. But no. He uses it to thanks family and
co-workers.

9:13 p.m. Huh? What did that guy who just won best drama directing just say?

9:05 p.m. Emmy is honoring "Roots." If you wanna take the remembrance to the next level, check out this nifty asap photo gallery
from earlier this year. Best Miniseries goes to AMC's "Broken Trail."
Wow. That poor "Starter Wife" is getting shut out despite her 10 noms.

8:57 p.m. Dude, don't play out Robert Duvall with the symphony. Not cool.

8:43 p.m. Time for the most funniest category of the night:
comedy writing. This is the one where the writers do those hilarious
nominee reels. Conan O'Brien's immigrant worker gag made us chuckle the
most. We laughed even harder when they said they wanted to exit through
the trap door after winning.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

8:38 p.m. Wow. Kathryn Hiegl just dropped an s-bomb, thanked
the announcer for getting her name right and revealed her that own mama
told her she wouldn't win. She's just might be our favoritest winner of
the night.

8:29 p.m. Thomas Haden Church was a supporting actor in a Western on the American Movie Classics channel? Ummm, congratulations!?

8:26 p.m. Snap. Presenter Kathryn Hiegl just corrected the
announcer, who pronounced her name as High-gel. We love her more than
we already did after "Knocked Up."

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

8:22 p.m. Ladies and gentleman, we have our first Paula Abdul
joke of the evening. Let's hope this is one of those reoccurring things
like last year's Bob Newhart gag.

8:14 p.m. Now that we've seen some more of it during the Best Supporting Actor in a Drama presentation, we think America Ferrera's
hair isn't just a beehive. It's more of a beehive-mohawk hybrid, a
beehawk, if you will. We love it. Oh, and Terry O'Quinn deservedly wins. His speech was funny and sweet.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

8:10 p.m. So let's breakdown this wacky in-the-round stage
while Romano is yuking it up ("I feel like I'm disrespecting the people
behind me."). It's sooo awkward, right? When The Slug first heard about
it, we assumed D-listers and no-names would be seated behind the
action. But no! Are the producers gonna move the action around or is
the "Ugly Betty" cast gonna have a butt view all night?

8:03 p.m. They cut to T.R. Knight during an Isaiah Washington joke in the opening number. Shameless!

8 p.m. The show has begun! That round stage reminds us of the Galactic Senate from "Star Wars."

7:02 p.m. Ugh. Emmy host Ryan is inside now and we're left with Giuliana Rancic.

6:56 p.m. Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi are cracking us
up! Ellen is complaining about E!'s lights ("You don't need a light.
It's hot outside.") and being relegated to the small box during live
coverage ("We're in the tiny box?") while yelling at Portia for
stealing her advice to Ryan.

6:52 p.m. The Legion of Fashion Doom — Carson Kressley and
Kimora Lee Simmons — are broadcasting live from E's skybox high above
the red carpet. They kinda look like they hate each other. Luckily,
they both agree with The Slug: Kate Walsh's hairdo is misguided.

6:49 p.m. Jamie Pressley is keeping it real with how she lost her baby weight: cabbage soup detox diet. Yep. Twice.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

6:39 p.m. We have our first oh-no-she-didn't moment of the evening: Kate Walsh's side ponytail.

6:32 p.m. Why is Ryan Seacrest should-we-call-the-cops creepy
around Hayden Panettiere? For the record, her agent and her mother are
her dates.

6:29 p.m. Whoa. America Ferrera is rocking a beehive, but it's not ugly.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

6:25 p.m. Tina Fey (sans glasses) just asked Ryan, "How are
you out here?" Many of the interviewees seem genuinely concerned for
him. Strangely, Ryan played Tina a clip with advice from — no, we're
not making this up and we took a picture just to prove that we're not
— Elmo.

6:06 p.m. Ryan just gave Debra Messing a mini-bottle of
Glenlivet. We're jeal. (In case you didn't know, jeal means jealous,
but since we just had to spell it out for you, it was kinda pointless,
huh?)

6:01 p.m. 3 ... 2 ... 1 ... and we have Ryan — and
the "Glam Cam." He's asking who Hayden Panettiere will bring to the
Emmys as her date. Creepy.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

5:52 p.m. Zachary Quinto from "Heroes" just rocked the "Stiletto Cam." Gasp! Who knew Sylar had such a huge hoofs?

5:50 p.m. Cute couple alert! Becki Newtown from "Ugly Betty"
and Chris Diamantopoulos from "The Starter Wife" are talking about how
they met in the Times Square subway. Awww. Her show is nominated for 11
awards. His is up for 10. Guess we know who wears the pants in their
relationship.

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

5:35 p.m. Green. Green. Green. All anyone keeps talking about
is how everything is earth friendly this year. Michael Urie — the
hilarious Marc from "Ugly Betty" — just quipped: "All these people
behind me are recycled cans!" Just wait until he gets inside the
ceremony and sees all the recycled plastic.

5:27 p.m. Where's Ryan!? All we're getting right now on E! is
Debbie Matenopoulos and Carson Kressley. Ugh. We miss Joan and Melissa.
Is anyone else not able to access emmyswithjoan.com?

(AP Photo/Derrik J. Lang)

5:15 p.m. E! Just debuted the "Stiletto Cam." Does that mean the "Glam Cam" has been retired?

5:02 p.m. Let's do this thang. We'll be starting our evening with E! red carpet coverage. While we love us
some "Dancing with the Stars" has-beens, E! is the only channel with
the distinction of having Emmys host Ryan Seacrest also on the red
carpet — that and we don't get TV Guide Channel. Sorry, Joey and Lisa!