Racism fires Michael Richards, hires up-and-comer Paula Deen

After a tumultuous week, Racism finally announced that former Seinfeld star and long time spokesperson Michael Richards would be let go to make room for a fresh, new face.

“It’s a business decision,” said Richards, “and while I’m upset, I ultimately know why it was made. I have nothing but respect for Paula, I think she’ll take it further than I ever could!”

This was a long time coming. As many remember, Richards was hired almost 10 years ago with a promising outlook. But nearly a decade of sub-par effort has forced Racism to go with a new public identity, and as we’re learning, it’s a big change.

“Paula Deen is everything we’re looking for in revitalizing our brand. A southern belle with a great attitude and a natural talent for promoting our message.”

Once thought to be on the brink of foreclosure, Racism is now poised to make a big comeback thanks to the new ‘Queen of Butter & Bigotry’, but it still remains to be seen if they can bounce back in a marketplace that has long since evolved beyond the need for their services.