Friday, April 20, 2012

What a day.

Yesterday I woke & by 10:30 I was ready for a do-over.
Wednesday night I went to bed all emotional, crying & all.
Thursday I woke up and was emotional...crying & frustration.
Even the exercise machine at the gym was frustrating me. Later, I did something so so so so stupid, that one action could have caused so many problems.
I was driving I pulled out onto a street, I was stopped at a light waiting to turn left. When I was sitting there waiting I was thinking, this seems weird. A car beeped at me, I looked around and realized I was in the far left lane...on a two way street....IN THE WRONG FREAKING LANE! With oncoming traffic getting ready to turn or come my direction. I thought {HOW THE HECK DID I DO THIS? WHAT THE FLIP AM I THINKING??? I AM SO D*** STUPID} I moved over but still wasn't in the correct spot. Then a car came towards me, I had to back up, pass two cars & get to the correct lane. Thankfully that part wasn't really difficult. I felt so stupid, I am not a horrible driver, I am not usually so absent minded. Ever since the night before I had been emotional & crazy and it still continued...
I really don't know what my issue is... I have BIG problems focusing, & having drive & energy to get this done. I love to be productive, but lately I am not seeing the point. I guess I feel like I keep trying but never make progress. There seems to be so much on my plate, I want to get things accomplished but it never happens.
Frustration seems like it is a consistent part of almost every moment of every day. Crying out to Jesus happens over & over...
Oh man I need some peace, organization & motivation.