Monday, August 13, 2012

Daily Dose of Gross

My boys, they are so different. Perhaps I shouldn’t be so surprised by this, still, but I am. I built my world around Charles and expected the next one to be like him.

They’re similar in the ways that matter. They look like brothers, of course, but they are also both loving and social, generally very happy, communicative, playful…

Their personality differences, however, are astounding. Jamie is not nearly as loud as Charles was/is. Charles’ movements are big, whereas Jamie’s are mostly small. Jamie concentrates, while Charles flits from one thing to the next (though this trait is mellowing somewhat – Charles has, for the past six months, taken refuge in playing by himself for at least a little while each day; a consequence, no doubt, of both growing up a bit and having a baby brother who likes to break your stuff). Charles’ laughter is loud, infectious, and so beautifully adorable that people who hear it frequently comment that it should be recorded and used as a laugh track. Jamie’s laughter is quiet, almost aspirated, and he doesn’t laugh nearly as frequently. Charles is pretty transparent with his emotions, whereas Jamie flirts and seems to be more mischievous by the day.

One thing I really didn’t expect to be different about them is how often Charles gets sick versus Jamie. Charles has been sick off and on since he was born. He constantly has a runny nose with a day-glo green crust of snot around his nostrils. (Are you using this blog as birth control? Is it working? Because day-glo boogers are a pretty normal occurrence in my house and I just don’t even worry anymore. Turns out the dog loves them and so instead of using a Kleenex to wipe them off, I just call Buster over to give the kids’ faces a lick. Eeeeew!)

Now, Charles and Jamie have been given every immunization recommended, and probably a few extra to boot. A booster for Pertussis because our area has had a long, fiery epidemic? Check. A second round of Hepatitis A because they added five strains since Charles got the vaccine as a baby? Check. Flu shot every year? Check. Argue all you want for not vaccinating kids, I will not change my mind or actions: these children get their immunizations. Period. End of story.

(But not really the end of the story because I have more to say, just not about whether or not to vaccinate my children.)

But Charles still gets every cold that comes his way (I should be thankful that he doesn’t get the big bad stuff that we vaccinate against, I suppose) and Jamie does not. It’s almost as if Charles is taking on all the germs and letting Jamie build up immunity through him. And do you know how this ends about 50% of the time for Charles? With an eye infection.

You thought green nose crusties were gross? How about green snot coming out of your child’s eye, sticking his lashes together? It’s just as disgusting as it sounds. And all because kids are inherently gross. An adult would wipe his or her nose on a tissue and eventually get over the cold. Charles wipes his nose with his hand, picks the boogers and eats them, and then rubs his eyes, thereby spreading the virus to his poor, little tear ducts.

Jamie does not do this. I think Jamie actually prefers the dog-lick method of cleaning to the Kleenex method and therefore his eyes stay pretty clean.

We’re on our way to the doctor in an hour or so because Charles’ eyes have been oozy for about five days now and that’s my limit. I signed up for a lot when I decided to have kids, and when God gave me boys, I reconciled myself to a lot of gross and weird boy things, but the eye goobers have gone on long enough.

Especially because one of the best treatments for eye goobers is a long shower. And I’d like to shower alone again someday.