Keep doing it until you don’t care about that issue any more. Then try the starter phrase (or another) again, and see what else comes up.

Doing this with my recent relationship, I was utterly shocked at how many things I uncovered. I think I’m finally understanding why she left. Who’d want to stick around if they could feel that much negative energy firing at them?

And this was despite me consciously choosing and working damn hard at (ie, dropping my own crap so I could be) loving her as much as I possibly could.

Wow.

There’s a little bit of Mr Gate Closer Horse McBolterson going on here, but the way I figure it – if I’m having those thoughts about her, well, I’m sure I’m also having them about other people…

…like myself?

And once again, we come back to our most important relationship.

The one we have with ourselves.

Have a go. Get quiet, say the phrases above (but aimed at yourself) and see what your brain fills in.

“I disapprove when I…”

“I disapprove that I haven’t…”

“I disapprove that I…”

“I disapproving of my…”

“I disapproving of how I handled…”

“I disapprove that I never…”

If it’s anything like my experience, you’ll be alternately shocked – and then relieved once it’s gone. You’ll know it’s gone when you can say the exact same phrase and feel no reaction at all.

When you can say all of the phrases above and have your brain add nothing? That’s when you know you’re getting really clear.

Ever wonder why you feel crappy half the time for no particular reason? Yeah. It’s internal noise like this. It doesn’t help.

Fortunately, just bringing it into the light is really all that needs be done to get rid of it. You could use EFT if you feel like something needs a solid bash, but generally just letting it go is enough.

What’s the advantage to dumping disapproval?

Well, we’re all looking for approval (love). Once we let go of disapproving of ourselves, it leaves the gate open for us to unconditionally love ourselves. That self-love becomes effortless and automatic, instead of an ongoing daily battle.

It’s also always, always a much better idea to be self-loving than be looking to others to provide this approval. After all, we’re the only ones who will be with us every second for the rest of our lives.