Fixed incorrect creation of the pColFor instances (per Roger Gammans patches). This fixes surious crashes with large database systems, and significantly increases the speed of the application when idntifying all datasource tables.

More menu work:
1. fixed drawing of selected disabled items
2. now the focus is always kept at the menubar/invoking window
3. disabled menus now don't open up
4. menubar now releases capture when it is "closed"
5. menu now forward mouse move messages to menubar allowing changing menus
just by moving mouse
6. fixed key processing, now menubar forwards key presses to the opened menu