Nap time after baby 2 is born

04-06-2011, 10:12 PM

I've got a 2.5 year old and a 6week old. my 2 year old was starting to drop her nap in Jan. but still would take one a few days a week, or at least take quiet time every day. Since my son was born she refuses to nap, and wont take quiet time. Not that it's very quiet, because her natural sleepy time is right when he wakes up and wants to nurse or just make noise. We are really struggling. She wakes up every morning so happy and content telling us how much she loves her brother, loves us, then she plays and asks me to incorporate the baby in the play, we get one on one time while he takes his morning nap most days. After her mid-day lull happens she becomes jealous and very difficult, she tries to start pushing on the baby's head, and becomes very clingy and tearful constantly telling me how much she needs me and that she wants to snuggle with me. Any attempts to give her snuggles or attention even without baby in my arms become very physical on her part and she starts trying to hurt me. And then at the end of the day she absolutely loses it, she has gone to bed at 6pm twice this week, at least tonight I got some dinner in her. She is sleeping well at night and starts out great but by 2 we are all in tears. And Daddy isn't getting any time with her during the week because by the time he gets off of work she is in this major Mommy mood and constantly freaking out. How have other Mom's of 2 managed to get the older one down for a nap in these early weeks and months??? I am convinced these behaviors have a lot to do with the lack of nap, because on the weekends when I get her down for a nap since Dad can take baby she is happy and she doesn't show any of the jealousy and melt-down's I'm getting all week. I've read Pantley's book on Toddler Sleep and Nap's, but the problem is I can't give her my undivided attention in the middle of the day and the baby is usually upset when she is ready for a nap.

That sounds hard for both of you. Many children do give up naps around this age and it can be a difficult transition for them. I'm afraid I don't have any magic solutions, but it's my best guess that once her body adjusts to a no-nap, longer nighttime sleep, she'll feel better and act better.

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I will have this same challenge soon, I'm sure. My daughter naps on my lap every day while I get some work done - I work on the computer. We have a baby coming in October, so I know that we'll all have to adjust to the change!

One idea I've read is to keep the baby in a carrier or wrap so that he is close to you and hopefully content then giving your daughter attention. This may feel like she's getting your undivided attention because you're hands are free and you're able to focus on her a bit more. You might be able to do your nap time routine with her with the baby this way.

It sounds like by her mood that she's not ready to skip her nap time. What is your routine on the weekend and how long does it take? Perhaps try adjusting the weekend routine so that you can incorporate your son into it during the week.