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Friday, 14 June 2013

"'Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?'"

Oh my gosh, you guys. I can't even begin to process the fact that THERE IS NO MORE HARRY POTTER TO READ, and also THIS IS BASICALLY THE LAST HARRY POTTER DAY, and other sad things like that, so INSTEAD let's just talk about the book and weep.

There is SO MUCH to talk about in this last section, I think (I have, like, 18 pages of notes, mostly because I'm INSANE but also because I copied out whole CHUNKS of text, but anyway) and I'm going to try and restrain myself and only say the very most important things, mostly because I have a time limit (places to go etc etc) but also because, what is there to say? This section is both wonderful and horrible at the same time, and pretty much all of it makes me want to weep but let's just talk about the things that actually did, shall we?

Percy comes back!- I don't even remember if I was expecting this to happen, or if it was just a wonderful surprise, but every time it gets me because OMG all Molly wants is for all her children to be together and he comes back and ADMITS HE WAS WRONG and it's lovely.

BUT THEN- Fred dies- And how cruel is that, JK? Firstly it always gets me when ONE twin is killed off because THEY ARE TWINS AND ARE SUPPOSED TO BE TOGETHER ALWAYS, but this is Fred! We know Fred! We love him! And also it feels like Ron might be dead for a minute and that is terrifying, but then Fred is ACTUALLY dead and it's not a relief! Nothing about this is good!

And then Lupin and Tonks- This is a cruel and horrible thing to do to her readers, but it sure is moving (and awful)- Not only do they now have an orphaned child, Harry's just lost the last living (close) link to his parents and also remember how much I fancied Lupin in PoA? It was a LOT.

Snape.- I am physically unable to cope with how much Snape loved Lily, and for how long, and how he really was protecting Harry for all those years and oh, Snape. I was of course weeping throughout all of his memories, but I also just think... How amazing that this one chapter can change your entire view of a character because seriously? I hated Snape so much. HATED him. Was absolutely willing to be convinced that he was evil because I hated him, but then, new information emerged and suddenly everything I thought about him was turned into this deep sympathy for him and that is why I've been defending him for this whoooole readalong. Oh Snape. You deserved better than being eaten by a snake.

Then Harry accepts that he's going to have to die- And I know! I know he isn't going to die! But still it's terrifying being inside his brain when HE thinks he's going to have to die, and it's so beautiful that he doesn't even question the reality of this- not that he's not scared but that he's brave enough not to run away from death because he believes it's the thing to do to save everyone he cares about. God, I love him.

The Resurrection Stone- I LITERALLY CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS BIT. All the crying. All of it. Ever. "'You'll stay with me?' 'Until the very end,' said James. 'They won't be able to see you?' asked Harry. 'We are part of you' said Sirius. 'Invisible to anyone else.' Harry looked at his mother. 'Stay close to me,' he said quietly." (I'm not kidding, I am crying right now from typing that. DESTROYS me.)

The Headmasters' Office- I'm pretty much ok once Harry doesn't die (although I am still a bit sniffly when he meets Dumbledore in Purgatory or wherever) and then Voldy dies and whathaveyou and Harry, Ron and Hermoine go up to Dumbledore's office and the portraits all give him a standing ovation? And in Dumbledore's portrait "tears were sliding down from behind the half-moon spectacles into the long silver beard, and the pride and gratitude emanating from him filled Harry with the same balm as phoenix song"? Yeah, that gets to me. Right in the heart.

So what can I say? There was a lot of crying. And also, a few other things:

It's so perfect that the last quarter of the book happens in Hogwarts. It's kind of one of those things where I didn't realise how much I missed it until we got back there, and even with all these bad things going on, it's still so. good. to be back there even under so much trauma. "But he was home. Hogwarts was the first and best home he had ever known." Perfect.

I know we've been doing the whole Draco-Harry thing (Harry saved his life! TWICE!) But what about Luna and Harry? She's there with Dean and Ernie and their Patronuses, urging Harry to think of happy things, and she's there when it's all over, knowing just what Harry needs. Or... Maybe I just want to marry Luna?

Ok, so what is that gross thing in the bundle at Kings Cross/Purgatory? Is it the part of Voldemort's soul that was attached to Harry, or... Something else? And in other questions I want answered, does anyone really care about the Deathly Hallows at this point? Are they really just there to make the point that we shouldn't be afraid of death? Cause that's cool.

Neville is a fucking badass. Also, fun snake fact- Nagini is a sanskrit word for an deity that takes the form of a snake, so REALLY we should have known she was holding a bit of Voldy from day 1 (or book 4. Whenever she appears.)

"'NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH.'"Best thing ever.

In the end, Voldy is killed by his own rebounding curse. I feel like it's a very superhero-ish thing for Harry never to have to kill anyone, and in the end for evil to end up being it's own foil, and then at the same time, I'm not sure if I feel like it's a bit of a cop-out? I could go either way on this, folks.

I don't know why but the "but he was home. Hogwarts..." line killed me this read through. Like I've always cried pretty much this entire section every read through but that line KILLED me extra hard this time around.

I always thought (hoped?) JKR was going to go down the Luna and Harry route because, love Ginny I do, but it always felt a little "look I'm a Weasley now". Luna on the other hand never treated Harry differently and always seemed to be a calming influence on him. Not sure I'm team Luna/Harry but it definitely felt morr natural. That said, she should absolutely be with Neville.

I always assumed that yep, it was voldy's soul in the white King's Cross.

And finally I hate you for making me cry again! But not really because at least we're crying together!

I think the thing with Harry and Ginny is kiiiind of like Laurie and Amy in Little Women (or Good Wives, even) where Amy was suuuuper into Laurie, and Laurie was suuuuper into the Marches, so they just got married for some reason. SOUND FAMILIAR?! Luna is so good for Harry, I think. But she would be good for Neville too! I don't know, I'm just pissed that Luna isn't even IN the damn epilogue (more on that next week...)

We ARE crying together. "Laura looked at Kayleigh. 'Stay close to me,' she said quietly" WE CAN BE EACH OTHER'S COURAGE!

OMG too many emotions! Fred's death hurts me the same, because they're twins! You can't have only one twin! Ugh, so painful. Poor George.

I think it's... kind of silly that Harry's Expelliarmus spell makes Voldy's spell rebound he effectively kills himself. Like sure, it's great because these are still kid's books... but come on. And we hardly ever see a lot of spells rebound in this series, so that makes me doubly more skeptical of it. And Harry was taking a HUGE risk there... what if Expelliarmus didn't work? Or what if it did, but before he could throw the killing curse Voldy escapes? SO much room for error. Buuuuut whatever, cause clearly JK made it work!

POOR GEORGE indeed. And there isn't even an emotional George bit, you just see him kneeling by Fred's head, so you have to IMAGINE how badly he feels and that's just horrible!

I think JK definitely did make it work. I guess she didn't want Harry to physically kill Voldy because of how killing tears your soul apart and stuff, but come on! This is VOLDY we're talking about. He's not even human anymore, really. But yeah, like I said, I'm still pretty much ambivalent about it.

I can't eiiiiither! But we still have next week to love each other and stuff!

That's totally what I was thinking of when I was like 'Harry's like a superhero!' But I'd like to think that if he HAD really really needed to, then he could have done it, because some people just NEED killing. Like Voldy could have been held in Azkaban for any amount of time. There's no rehabilitation for this dude.

You are not the only one who wants to marry Luna. I'd throw my husband over if she looked twice at me. Just sayin'.

I may be the only person in the world unmoved by Molly's line to Bellatrix. I didn't think it was out of character for her to say it, but there's nothing we've seen of Molly up to this point in the series that makes me believe she could finish off Bellatrix Lestrange. She simply doesn't have the skill or the cunning. The desire, yes, and in spades. BUt we've seen the entire series that Bella is probably second only to Voldie among the Death Eaters in terms of power and malice. I just don't believe Molly could pull it off. *ducks the objects being thrown in my direction and skulks off*

I agree with the others that that is what the bundle is in the King's Cross chapter. But I think the real question being begged here is, what would have happened if Harry HAD gone over to it to comfort it? It was his first impulse to do that, despite being repulsed by it. Might have had a very different ending, eh?

I am TOTALLY with you on the walk into the forest surrounded by LIly, James, Lupin, and Sirius. I get a little sniffly now just thinking about it. It's one of my favorite scenes, and there were so many excellent, I mean really really superb, scenes in our reading this week.

I... Am actually not as in love with Molly as I could be because there was that time when she was SO MEAN to Hermione and also to Fleur and she has pissed me off a lot. BUT I think there's something to be said for the whole motherly-love thing overcoming the EVIL of Bellatrix and I think it's believable because we don't even really KNOW what Molly can do, you know? Other than be a really good witchy housewife *sigh*. But anyway, the point is, I appreciate the gesture of motherly love being stronger than EVIL.

YOU ARE SO RIGHT AND YOU ARE BLOWING MY MIND!! Seriously... That could have been amazing. And that would have been Harry being killed because of his saving-people-thing. Wow.

I think the forest walk IS my favourite scene. I'm struggling to think of one I like better (in ALL the books) and there definitely isn't one that made me cry more. Oh god, too many emotions, man.

Rayna- NEVER FORGET. I think that one thing has given me a whooole other perspective on Molly, as someone who is AWESOME as long as you're in her family, but if you're not then, you know, watch out! I mean, I don't HATE her or anything, but there's this whole side to her that's not the best.

Megs- I KNOW RIGHT!! Mind=blown. That part of the Voldy-soul would probably have eaten him or something eeeeeek!

I really thought Harry was going to die when he walks into the woods. That scene gets me more than any other scene. Even more than the Sirius scenes and THOSE WERE TERRIBLE. So much crying. It sucks.

I like that Harry doesn't actually kill Voldie and instead it's his own curse rebounding back. I mean, we see Harry use unforgivable curses so we KNOW he can do it and all. He doesn't come out completely clean.

I believe there's a movie where Tom Hardy is a boxer or something? That would be my guess as to where it's from but yes! It is perfect and also *SNIFFLE*

UGH, you're so right! How would they even make them go back the next year?! 'Don't worry, everything will be ok now that Professor McGonagall is Headmistress!' 'But but but I don't want to be Crucio-ed!' Bless them.

I think you have redeemed yourself with crying. It's FINE. You're fine.

I agree with everyone else -- the ugly child thing is the 1/8th of Voldie's soul that's still in his body. Blechhhh.

I think Harry not having to actively kill Voldemort is a bit of cop-out, especially since he earlier used the cruciatus curse with no misgivings. PLUS if he isn't going to use the killing curse, why would he just try to disarm Voldemort? At least go for a stunning spell, Harry. Come on.

And I teared up reading your progression of sad parts with accompanying crying gifs...

I feel like I USED to know this... But this time I was just like DUMBLES YOU ARE BACK! and got confused about the creepy baby thing.

I see your argument, and I raise you Megs's 'Voldemort-is-his-own-undoing' thing. Cause I quite like that. And also I like Harry being sort of pure, killing wise (NOT that anyone could blame him for killing him though! How could they?) But yeah, I'm still pretty ambivalent about the whole thing!

Yeahhhhh, sorry about that. I didn't have anything to say except LOOK AT THESE PARTS THAT MADE ME CRY because that's basically all I did while I was reading it. HOW COULD I NOT?!