My Thoughts/Your Thoughts

This post really has nothing to do with writing, but it’s my blog and even though I don’t usually voice my opinions…

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I guess it started with Facebook. I have many friends with many different beliefs. Different religions, sexual preferences, etc. They post different things and if I agree with their views I’ll like the post but I don’t always share the post. Am I wrong? If I don’t share the post and put out that I support it, am I being a hypocrite? I’m the type of person that believes, live and let live. You respect my beliefs and I’ll respect yours. I just don’t see any reason to put my beliefs out there just so someone else can come along and argue with me that my beliefs are wrong. Maybe they are, but they are my beliefs.

Which brings me to two blog posts I read this past week and I just have to share my thoughts.

Gabrielle Reece did an interview with US magazine and she said “women should be submissive with their husbands”

Now I’m wondering; submissive how? Like “Fifty Shades of Gray” submissive or maybe only do what he likes to do, go where he likes to go.

Is she sending the wrong message? What happens if he’s abusive? She has a new book out and I haven’t read it so I’m not exactly sure what she means or how submissive a woman should be, but you can read the article here,

This one has been all over the web. Some support it, others don’t and it boils down to just a matter of opinion and my thoughts of course 🙂

The mother who regrets having children.

I don’t condemn her for not wanting children. Not every person is cut out to be a mom or a dad. What I condemn her…No I don’t condemn her for anything, because it’s not my place to do that, but I do have some things to tell her.

One, don’t blame your children for ruining your life. Blame your husband for wanting kids. No that’s not right either. The only one to blame is yourself. You knew you didn’t want children and yet you compromised. We all have choices to make in this life and we must all live with our decisions and blaming your children, who didn’t ask to be brought into this world, is wrong.

As for free time for yourself…Seems to me you had a lot of that. What with your husband taking care of the kids when he was home and when you went on vacation. Not to mention that, kids do take naps when they are little and eventually they do go to school.

My thoughts, I think that she is still very bitter about her decision and that this is still eating away at her and maybe she should get some counseling. What do you think?

And last but not least. I need help. Ha ha, yes most people who know me will tell you, I definitely need some kind of help.

But that’s not the kind of help I need today. See the little scruffy dog in the featured picture? He showed up at my house on Friday. Alone, scared, hungry, and thirsty and me being a big softy, I have fed him. He’s afraid and won’t come any closer then a foot away from me. Not sure if he was abused and that’s why he is un-trusting or maybe just because he’s been on the streets and people tend to chase stray dogs away. See the other little dog in the picture? That’s my little Duggy, he was running the streets, in fact one of the busiest streets in my city, and the rental car company that I used to work for, had coaxed him into the office and had called the pound to come pick him up and I just happened to stop by and say hello and this little dog came out from behind the counter and jumped up on my lap…Well that was three years ago. I also have my Mitzy, whom I’ve had since 2003. I don’t need another dog fighting over who gets to sleep on my lap and yet…

I have been getting flak about encouraging it to hang around and that was not my intentions, but I can’t let an animal go hungry.

Do I gain it’s trust and then call the pound? Do I just quit feeding it and hope it goes away? So what do I do? What would you do?

Well that’s my thoughts and dilemmas for today. Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend. Guess I should bake my oldest son a cake, since it is his birthday today 🙂

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13 Comments

I have several thoughts on this. I guess people have a right to express themselves, but that doesn’t mean they should express thoughts they know will offend other people. Facebook is supposed to be a sharing place, where we can appreciate and love each other. I personally hate posts which attack my president, I hate angry posts attacking other political opinions. Love means being tolerant. No one ever changes their mind regarding religion or politics. Why alienate people? Secondly, please adopt the dog. This world is filled with pain. Why not drain a drop of two of pain from the world and make at least something or someone happy? Thanks, Julia Robb, Marshall, Texas (p.s., Please don’t go to my website, as it’s being reconstructed, but if you or anyone else wants to talk, write me at juliarobbmar@aol.com).

Hi Julia
I agree with you on the facebook issue. I like people because they are funny and witty, they make me smile, and I just enjoy talking to them. As for the puppy…animals are like kids they need a lot of love and care and to me it is a lifetime commitment. Something not to be taken lightly. No matter what decision I make, it’s one that I will have to live with. I just wished people would be more responsible and have their animals neutered and not breed them for money. There are way too many animals in the shelters wanting good homes.

Hi Karen,
On your first point, I decided to leave Facebook because of too much pressure to like, not like, tolerate or endure the inane. That has simplified my life a great deal. I have my opinions and feel comfortable sharing them with people in person, in context.

As for regrets on being a parent…mostly, I feel bad that there are people who haven’t felt their lives enriched by kids or the pure joy from seeing your kids figure out their lives. I wouldn’t trade those feelings for any travel, vacation or free time – it has made my life worthwhile. I was 30 when my first was born and I waited to be sure I really wanted to be a mom. I am glad I waited and am very happy I made that choice.

Last but not least, I would take on another dog just like you. I applaud your big-heartedness and hope you can get him to trust you. He looks like a dog worthy of rescue. As a stray magnet myself, i know the dilemma, however I have never regretted helping an animal.

Hi Erin
I haven’t left facebook, but I don’t get on there as much as I used to.
As for my kids, I have 3 grown boys and even though life hasn’t always been easy, I wouldn’t trade them for the world.
As for the dog, yes he is a cutie, and he’d definitely be spoiled here and loved, but I don’t know…But I do know whether I keep him or not, I wouldn’t let him starve and I’d find him a good home.

I no longer pay much attention to facebook. I am AGAIN locked out because of hackers and now have to send my ID to get back on my own page. I never shared my private beliefs there as I knew it was out there for all to read.
About the pooch. He is kind of small and really cute:)
I’d say no pound, he will probably not get adopted with so many puppies there. I’d make up my mind to take him in or… well, there really is no or now that you’ve fed him!
That’s how I ended up with to big dogs when I was looking for a small one.
Looks like Duggy likes him. He’s probably telling the new guy to look cute and cross his paws!

Haha! Yes, Duggy likes all dogs! And I have been thinking of getting another, but was thinking more in the lines of a big dog! I heard there were two blue Great Dane puppies roaming the streets on Friday, but I didn’t see them.

I think the individuals involved in a marriage are the ones who get to decide how it works. I would be leery of anyone who came along and told me or my husband how we should behave within our marriage. It’s odd to me that people even have opinions about how other people should live their lives, but they do.

When I was growing up, my family took in every stray dog or cat that wandered onto our property, so I know what it’s like to “attract” animals. I don’t think it’s a mistake that the dog found you. Maybe you’re supposed to be the guardian angel who finds it a wonderful home. You could try visualizing yourself giving it to a great home. How does that make you feel? If you feel happy, then that could be the right decision. It you feel sad or a little heartbroken, then maybe you’re supposed to keep it.

I made the decision not to post anything religious or political on Facebook or Twitter or my blog and I’ve kept to that. Both topics are way too polarizing. I also try to avoid sending anything negative into the technical cloud. It’s just bad Karma.
We just adopted a rescue dog and she’s the love of our life, but I understand your hesitation with the pup. It’s a big commitment and too many people end up with pets that they don’t take care of. Sometimes answers come when we least expect it, so I hope that’s try for you!

The doggie is just awfully cute. You know what would happen if this were at my fence, right? I, too, think that two dogs is ideal, but I certainly wouldn’t be able to resist helping this guy. You’d always wonder what happened, and maybe not forgive yourself, otherwise….

Wife submissive? I don’t think so!!! I’m not reading the article right now, maybe there are nuances that attenuate her stance, so I’ll have to give her the benefit of doubt for now. I agree with you, Karen – it’s a give-and-take. I do think, however, that with all this women’s rights BS a demand for entitlement has grown in women that is actually poisoning marriage, or any other serious relationship. Women holding out, “I deserve better” – that kind of attitude, the all-important power struggle. Graciousness seems to be a thing of the past, unfortunately.

Blaming your children? Again, I’m with you, Karen. We all make decisions that we, maybe, regret later, and then we live with the consequences! MY life is full of regrets, but life goes on, you shoulder your responsibilities, no matter how reluctantly. Even if I DO wish I were the center of the Universe, I have to accept the fact that I’m not. Pains me to admit that…. Bottom line is: whatever decisions/choices one makes, along with the negative, there’s ALWAYS a positive side. With some work, and extensive soul searching in some cases (like hers!), life can be rewarding instead of depleting.

Self-pity is the most destructive force in life – I know that first-hand.

Love you, Karen! Now, give that doggie a name, dig out an old collar, and CLAIM him. 😉

Soft, receptive and submissive – isn’t that the definition of simpering? Sorry, but I too have issues of belief here – she doesn’t come across as ‘the little woman at the kitchen sink’. I worry about Facebook for exactly your reasons, which I guess is why I try to pretend it isn’t there. Way too much ‘sharing’! Oh, and you have a new dog in your life – you just haven;t accepted it yet.
As for kids – the greatest regret in my life is that I didn’t make the most of every moment I could have had with mine. Issues of selfishness, always disguised as ‘necessity’ are the wedges that drive between, and sadly what goes around comes around in the end. My children are the people I made them – they have their own issues now.

I always maintain the view that one should respect others and their right to their own beliefs, and not condemn anyone or seek fights and arguments…but that does NOT mean that I do not have the right to protect my own space – I can choose whom I associate with, choose what I post and my blog and what not, and choose what to look at on Facebook or to use FB at all. Although I will not criticise anyone else, I choose not to associate with someone if it doesn’t resonate with me. Respecting someone’s belief system or words does not mean you have to read it, like it or approve of it. Just disengage yourself from it.

It’s good to enjoy other views, but that doesn’t mean we have to support them( or like them on FB) I enjoy seeing people express themselves when they have feelings on a subject. We live in a world of tip-toeing and sometimes we need to just let it out. If I don’t agree, then I read and move on and leave opinions to others.

That is a cute dog– maybe one of the neighbors would take him in. Three dogs is a lot to handle.