Navigating the Uncharted Waters of Life

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I Belong in a Forest

I can’t move. I’m literally petrified. People are going to start paying to walk through my house, stare at me, and chip off a piece of petrified mum when they think no one is looking.

I am afraid of making decisions, of making the wrong move. I’ve gotten to the point where I’m questioning my choice of socks. Are these too thick? Should I wear the black ones or brown ones? Those are too thin. I think. Wait. Are those too thin? Honey? Hello?

I’ve been here before. I’ll admit it. But it’s not where I live. So in addition to the uncomfortable, twisting feeling in my gut that I’m going to make a horrible mistake in footwear, I have the uncomfortable, dizzy feeling in my head that I’m being a flighty, indecisive flake. Which I am.

Sometimes I find myself in this place. I don’t always know what brought me here—the major issues or the buildup of minor annoyances. But, alas, I’m here. And I have to find my way home.

The irony is that when you’re nervous about which way to go, you get stuck. Then you write posts that say, “I can’t move…”

This is never a fun place to be. I’m sorry. 😦 It’s easy to say take care of yourself (and I do mean, ditch some obligations and take a hot bath with lavender) but the journey home is different for everyone… I hope you find your path quickly.

I guess the young family will un-petrify you; they always forced us out of whatever nervy hole we found ourselves in. I think with them fleeing the nest, it gets worse because you’ve none but yourself to make the decisions for – bit like cooking for one. No one really enjoys it so you just eat out of the tin because it’s too hard to bother pouring the contents into a pan.

Ha! Yes. I can’t stay this way for long with little ones. They do sort of force you out of whatever you’ve gotten yourself into, don’t they? Love the cooking analogy. Perfect. I’ll have to rely on myself to get moving again at that point.

I read this and freeze with you Sarah. So let’s breathe and walk and as Charli says, take in the air and the birds and the trees (not the petrified ones, the ones bending in the wind, spreading their canopy of shade and shelter above our heads, whispering gently as they guide us forward) and who cares what colour socks we’re wearing? The decision’s already been made ❤

Socks? I assumed – from the lovely banner – you always went barefoot! Sorry to bring a dissenting voice – I seem to be in a contrary mood this morning – but hey, decisions are risky, especially where footwear is concerned. If you keep perfectly still you won’t make the mistake I once made of going to work in mismatched shoes (to be fair, they were the same style in different colours – I think that tells you EVERYTHING you need to know about the kind of person I am, that I even had two pairs of similar shoes in my wardrobe).

Haha! 😀 Yes, you could assume that. I’ve also left the house with two different shoes. One black and one brown (same exact style). What does that say about us? Yes, decisions are risky and I can’t keep still for long. That road leads nowhere. Har. Seriously, that’s not where I want to be.

My shoes were brown and blue! Yeah, but sorry for my flippancy – maybe you do just need to sit still for a while until the world settles itself around you. Take a break, treat yourself well – wear the socks that feel most cosy.

Oh, I’m sorry. This is such a hard place to be. We’ve all been there, but that doesn’t mean any of us can help. For what it’s worth, good people love you and will be here to do whatever we can for you. And to move with you when you get unstuck.

I so appreciate your comment — that “we’ve all been there”. It seems quite a few people become stuck when they’re overwhelmed. I don’t like it here but I would love to go for a stroll with you when my feet (and brain) get unstuck.
You like my pink fuzzy sock and my brown dress sock? They look cool together, right? 🙂

First of all, oh my gosh, what wonderful comments you have received. You are one blessed lady.
I find that when I am in a tough spot and seem stuck, resting there for a while and accepting it for what it is isn’t so bad. You’ll remember to move when the time is right. For now, you can enjoy the view from where you are. I bet it’s pretty nice.

I was thinking the same thing. The comments here and on Twitter are wonderful. I do feel blessed. Also, it seems many have felt this way.
Yours is the second comment about just kind of staying here for a spell and exploring the space I’m in now. It’s a beautiful way to look at the situation. Thank you. ❤

Sarah! I get in this place too. Sometimes I get fixated on something silly like where to take a walk that day. I weigh all the options and no obvious choice emerges so I get bogged down in little details. When really, I need to just make a decision and remember there is not absolute right and wrong in shoes, walks, or many things.

Yes! That’s it. “Fixated” is the perfect word. It seems ridiculous but that’s what it is. I think about things until my mind is like Shakespeare’s potter’s wheel.
You’re right. There is no absolute. Thanks, Nina.

I hope you are again moving but if you aren’t what I do in these times is write a list. I fill the list to more things to do than I could possibly ever do and I make a decision which item I will get rid of first. Once that first decision is made it seems easy to make the rest. If it is a really tricky one you could try doing all the pluses of each choice and all the minuses and see which comes up trumps. Usually though you already know what it is you are going to do and eventually the time is right to do it. Until then as a few people have said just enjoy where you are. Failing those things helping it is time to get out the dice, write down all your options with a number 1 to 6 beside them and then let the di decide.
Good luck

Ugh. I usually write the dreaded To Do list then stare at it accusingly. There is SO MUCH on it. But, to get moving again, I’ll try doing one thing from the list. The problem with the +/- scoring is that most things are top of the list — crucial stuff. Isn’t it interesting… I do think we already know what we’re going to do and that we just need to wait it out until we eventually move. I like the idea of the dice, though. 😉 Thanks, Irene.

Hope your cement shoes are starting to crumble. I did the dice for awhile after reading the dice man. I was quite impressionable in those days. The trouble was when I did it I only ever put options that I was happy to do and never ones I didn’t want to. Although I still didn’t know which option I’d be doing it didn’t send me on a life of dastardly behaviour as happened in the book.

The shoes have cracks in them. That’s a start. They will surely crumble. I have to look up the Dice Man. Sounds interesting. Hmm. I wonder if most people would only put options they were willing and/or happy to do. Even if it was subconscious.