Goering and My Grandmother

Leading a secret life as a Jewish resistance fighter, you just never know who you're going to meet.

My grandmother is one of the most fascinating people I know. Me'me, as we called her, fought in the French resistance, ran a DP camp in post-war Europe, was a professor in Columbia University and has traveled the world extensively.

My Me'me was living in Paris while it was under Nazi occupation. She was working with the French underground smuggling Jews out of the occupied zone of France into the free zone. She had been an emerging actress in pre-war Paris, and came from a family of well-heeled diplomats. A very attractive young lady, my grandmother was comfortable among the more glamorous echelons of society. She was "well appointed with the finest of accoutrements." Suspicion would be aroused if she were to suddenly start leading a more understated life, so she continued to shop at the finest boutiques in Paris while leading the secret life of a Jewish resistance fighter.

My grandmother was not going to let half a platoon of Nazis stop her from getting her Hermes gloves.

One day my grandmother excitedly set out to Hermes' flagship store in Paris to pick up a pair of gloves she had ordered. Much to her consternation, the entire street was blocked off by German military vehicles. My Me'me is not one to get thrown off a mission easily. She was not going to let half a platoon of Nazis stop her from getting her Hermes gloves.

She also happened to know Paris like an accountant knows a calculator, so she simply went through a few back alleys and arrived at the back exit of Hermes, where the employees (in Hermes they are called personal shopping executives) would come in. She let herself into the store, and immediately discovered why the street was blocked off: Hermann Goering, the second most powerful Nazi and commander of the Luftwaffe, was shopping in Hermes. The whole store was filled with Nazi officers and bodyguards!

Cold fear coursed through her, as well as the repulsion of being in such close proximity to someone so intimately involved in the butchery of her people. But she quickly calculated that her best move would be to pretend like everything was normal and go about her business with no hint of fright or hatred. She walked up to the counter and asked for her gloves. The Hermes employees assumed she was an accompanying celebrity or official and assisted her expediently.

As she was exiting, she came to a narrow point in the store where only one person could walk through at a time. Right then, Goering was headed in the same direction. Who would go first? (They couldn't even possibly squeeze through together, because, as my Me'me told me, "Goering was a very fat man.") Goering, ever the effusive and charming gentleman, motioned for my grandmother to go first with a sweet, "Ladies First." She went through and left the store, and continued smuggling Jews out of the danger zone, now with a new pair of Hermes gloves.

"Never confuse culture with morality."

"Never confuse culture with morality," my grandmother told me. "Did Goering have culture? Sure! He was of aristocratic heritage. He was a patron of the arts and attended opera, and he probably cried while listening to Wagner's beautiful compositions! And he most certainly always let the lady go first. But did he have morals? Not a shred! He was the highest official in the Nazi hierarchy to authorize on paper the Final Solution. Morality and culture have nothing to do with each other. Decency and morality come from a divine source, and no amount of culture can substitute for that."

We can see the same lesson in the first of the Ten Commandments, "I am the Lord, your God, who took you out of Egypt, the house of slavery." It sounds redundant; we know that Egypt is the house of slavery! Perhaps God is telling us, look at the Egyptians, the pinnacle of culture in the world. They have papyri, pyramids, incredible embalming technique, astrology, art, hieroglyphics, brain surgery, and achievements in every field imaginable, yet they are still the house of slavery, the place in which your male children were thrown into the Nile, your babies stuck in the wall as bricks if the parents didn't make enough bricks themselves. God is telling us that if we want to simply follow the prevailing dominant culture, then we may end up being the most cultured barbarians in the world.

Behind many great civilizations you will find incredible barbarism. The Greeks and Romans clubbed their children to death if they were born with any deformity or, sometimes, just for being born female. They would cheer gleefully as they watched thousands of people kill each other in "games" at the coliseums. The Germans were the most cultured people in the world with their composers, scientists, poets, and scholars leading the world in achievements, yet we saw what they were capable of in the Holocaust.

On Passover we celebrate the Jewish people's redemption from a place of mere culture to a world of morality. They left behind the pyramids, hieroglyphics, advanced agriculture, and music of the dominant culture, and went out to the desert to learn the ethical precepts of genuine humanity and civilization, from the only true source, the Creator of humanity.

On Passover our mission is to see ourselves as if we are leaving Egypt. We must walk in the very same footsteps as our ancestors did, turning away from the dominant culture, refusing to think that it is automatically right because that is "culture," and instead turn to the divine moral code of the Torah. This is how we discover real freedom and liberate our souls from the shackles of "cultural servitude."

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About the Author

Leiby Burnham, CSW, is a rabbi, psychotherapist, and writer. He lives in Detroit with his wife, an ICU nurse, who is on strict orders to "leave her patients at work" and their three daughters, Orah, Shifra and Rachel. Rabbi Burnham works for the Jean and Theodore Weiss Partners in Torah program of Yeshiva Beth Yehudah, where he does community outreach, and runs a Jewish educational programs at University of Michigan, Wayne State, and Oakland University. He taught learning-disabled high school students for eight years in NYC, while receiving Rabbinical training at Shor Yoshuv Institute, and obtaining his Masters in Social Work from Yeshiva University.

The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 33

(28)
Joey,
March 19, 2013 5:01 PM

Thank you for this interesting insight! God bless!

(27)
davidovici,
March 8, 2013 2:18 PM

grand ùother's name

as I am from Paris, my grand father was Rov in Paris, Rav Stern, could you let me know the full name of this very courageous grand mother who met Goering? maybe she was a friend to our family... Thanks so much for your beautiful work

(26)
ruth housman,
March 7, 2013 5:53 PM

what recirculates

It's interesting this story comes back now, when I just again emailed about Hermes, because I often feel like I am being messaged, and in fact yes, I am, and I am passing it forward.

As to now hundreds, even thousands of commentaries on line, I can say, I have never really, especially on Aish, ever have felt, I am being read, but I do it, for LOVE, and must know by now, I am supposed to be, wherever I am.

(25)
Salem,
April 10, 2012 7:37 PM

C'est Incroyable!

What an amazing and stylish story!

(24)
Lisa,
April 10, 2012 2:40 AM

2012... We are falling

So true.... We have iPhones .... Wifi....we can go to mars...but what is our moral tempature? Does that ever fit in when we measure our "progress?"

(23)
Anonymous,
April 9, 2012 1:54 PM

The ultimate perspective

Thank you, Rabbi, for this insightful article. I've never heard these points put so well! I will share your Me'me's perspectives with my congregation and the students at our Hebrew school. Todah rabah!

(22)
ruth housman,
April 9, 2012 11:06 AM

Hermes

In Greek mythology, Hermes is the Messenger. And what is hermetic, we say, is sealed. And the Roman equivalent for Hermes was Mercury, surely mercurial, as is the metal, as in difficult to hold down, and Hermes himself, was known as a kind of an imp, and often portrayed this way. It is said that Hermetic Knowledge is mystic and deep. I am writing about this now because I had a recent Hermes coincidence which I have recorded in my Diary, and also shared. I got an email from a man whose name is Hermi, and I wrote to him about the Messenger God in Greece. This Hermi is Jewish. And that morning, a few hours later crossed the street on Concord Avenue, Cambridge to see int he window, a dog cutout with the name Hermes on it, at The Crate Escape.
I recount this because I believe I am being messaged, and mightily, as in coming to this particular story NOW.
It could be, something major is happening, sub rosa, and this amazing story, is part of that alchemy, and that God is messaging me, and then I am here to pass that on. It is, after all, Passover. I see matzoh, as a burnt manuscript, recounting the history of us Jews. And I see the broken parts of matzoh, as pieces of an eternal puzzle. But I do see, as puzzles are also for mystery, that the pieces are surely NOW, coming together, so I say, THIS year in Jerusalem! We can wait, and hope.

(21)
Anonymous,
April 9, 2012 10:51 AM

culture

morality and culture should be a required college course,

sharyl,
April 10, 2012 11:46 PM

yes

That is a great idea....

(20)
Anonymous,
March 3, 2010 7:46 AM

inspiring uplifting,

NO SUCH THING AS COINCIDENCE
Everything is min-hashomayim

(19)
Anonymous,
March 3, 2010 7:45 AM

First class article
Both interesting and inspiring. Extremely well written. Thank you

(18)
Anonymous,
June 27, 2007 11:31 AM

many blessings to you

Thank you from the bottom of heart for a wonderful site. Thank you for the stories that have blessed me. May GOD continue to bless your efforts and families.

Your grandmother's cool (non)action is, to me, a demonstration of strength greater, in a way, than that required for more overt actions called for in other situations.And her little lecture about culture and morality should be taught early and often.Also, the mention of Goering was what caused me to look at this article because the husband of a woman who worked for me was a dead ringer for Hermann, in profile. His name, too, was Goering.

(16)
Lori Fields,
April 6, 2007 6:41 AM

outstanding!!

"Morality and culture have nothing to do with each other. Decency and morality come from a divine source, and no amount of culture can substitute for that." YES!!! This was an outstanding article. I watched a documentary narrated by Linda Ellerby last night. I have studied the holocaust for years and always the question haunted me; how? How could such cultured people have done such horrific deeds? Your Me'me nailed it! "Never confuse culture with morality,"

Thank you for such an insightful article!

(15)
Rachel,
March 29, 2007 5:55 PM

You can have culture AND morality

I enjoyed this story very much, and one should not confuse culture with morality. However, the story also makes clear it's possible to have both. After all, Me'me had beautiful things and exquisite taste. Sometimes our society (Jewish and American) seem to equate morality with asceticism or lack of culture. I don't look down on the woman in my shul who wears the same outfit every Shabbat and serves cholent and chicken, nor do I look down on the one who wears magnificent designer clothing and cooks gourmet food. Both have a first priority of keeping Shabbat; their differences in style reflect their finances, but each is an Ayshet Chayil.

Lisa,
April 10, 2012 2:47 AM

At the finish line...

So true!! When it's " all over" Hashem won't be interested in what was in our jewelry box .... Albeit He will ask did we use our resources for the good of others....He won't ask us why we didn't cook gourmet.... Albeit he will ask us if we shared our שבת table with others.

(14)
arleen,
March 29, 2007 2:08 PM

A Wonderful Story.

Thanks so much for the history of your grandmother. I found it very inspiring, and also it reminded me of the difference between culture and morality, which is such an important lesson. Many thanks.

(13)
paula levin,
March 29, 2007 6:19 AM

not sure where I heard this, but apparently a professor of philosophy at a well-known university, and who lectured a course on morality was discovered to be having an afair. He was asked how a professor of morality could commit such immorality - he answered, "does a professor of mathematics have to be a triangle?" the academic world is also infamous for its lack of soul and integrity, yet ppl continue to associate degrees with self-worth.

Beverly,
April 9, 2012 2:39 PM

I agree..one of my biggest beefs with my mother's insane

emphasis on education, education, education...it didn't keep her from getting diabetes, or her son from taking his own life. The god of education is, always has been and always will be a false god.

Lisa,
April 10, 2012 2:53 AM

What we do from 9-5 does not define us!!

Yes... It's not what people are.... But what they do!! Just like you can't LOOK frum... You must BE frum!!

LADave,
March 7, 2013 7:02 PM

It's not just about being frum

Yes, being frum can help, but that's no guarantee of a strong moral compass. I know many orthodox Jews who are awful, abusive people and many reform and secular ones who are wonderful. It's not about observance or talmudic knowledge, but about doing right by your fellow man and woman.

(12)
Sara Rigler,
March 28, 2007 2:11 PM

Excellent article--a profound point superbly made.

(11)
Anonymous,
March 27, 2007 11:42 AM

The courage of RLB's Me'me is astounding. The article is well written and shows the true character of such a woman that is beyond admiration. The article serves as a means to really transition oneself into the Pesach mindset and grasp the true meaning behind Cheirutanu: Our Freedom.

(10)
Anonymous,
March 26, 2007 11:08 PM

Goering & My Grandmother article

That was an excellent article and I liked the way the author used it to teach a valuable lesson. That was one Grandma with chutzpah!

(9)
Anonymous,
March 26, 2007 7:47 PM

WOW!

This article shows an amazing amount of divine providence- Hashgacha Pratit. Had she done things differently, the course of events might have been different. WOW! That is an amazing story.

This goes to the crux of misunderstanding among Jews in an obsession with relativism

Thank you Rabbi Leiby Burnham for your most extraordinary story and important commentary distinguishing between culture and morality.

Especially so in its application to Judaism and where we are in this equation! Which side of the fence, how and why?

The applications of this seemingly simple story to behaviors endemic among our own people resounds. How simple the truth and yet how distant those who refuse to see it!

In our own eagerness to embrace and be embraced by the broader religions, the full spectrum of other's cultures and belief systems, distortions have been brought to bear redefining Judaism oft based on ignorance of Judaism.

Worse, an acceptance of non-Jewish practices and adopting of observance practices under rubrics such as "Cultural Judaism", "Humanist Judaism" (as if Judaism by definition isn't quintessentially the gift of humanity, the very concept of individual personhood as a value to civilization). Then there are the "Reconstructionists", and pretentiously the robbing of Jewish souls and our progeny by the "The Society for Ethical Culture" founded by Jews wishing to distance from and dislocate from Judaism in an effort to merge with non-Jews. Ironically, and then again perhaps not so, ascribing to its self Jewish beliefs and values.

Much ascribed to other faiths, religions as the attractive feature by Jewish adherents so very often are actually based on and derived from Jewish texts and teachings.

Come home Jews to who you are! No need to run away from home to find home!Its all there!

(6)
Sarah,
March 25, 2007 5:02 PM

Important point, well made.

My Mom, may she rest in peace, used to say the very same thing about education and culture. She aspired to have educated children, of course, but always stated that being educated is not the same as having a fine moral character. There are educated and cultured boors and course doctors and lawyers. Refinement comes from a pure soul, not an intellectual gift.

(5)
Elisabeth,
March 25, 2007 3:17 PM

on: Goering and my grandmother

What an uplifting and even funny story! I lived in Breslau, Germany during that time, went as a German through difficult times, not only because of the war, but because my parents and we all were devout Catholics. My father taught at a Gymnsium, and had several Jewish friends, who all congregated in our home, together with their wifes.He was forced into early retirement (Pension), because of his views, at a time when my sisters and I were only children, and the income accordingly was diminished..I attended the private Catholic Ursuline school,until it was closed by Hitler. My closest girlfriend was Renate Rudolph. Her father of german Nationality, had been a lawyer in Danzig, her mother of the Jewish faith. She was sent by the Underground to Breslau to the "Ursulinen Kloster" in the suburb of Karlowitz,and became my best girlfriend, spending much time in my family. I lost track of Renate when my family was forced to flee the advancing Russians. And so far I have been unable to find her. Would anyone in your place be able to help me? She would be about the same age as I am, now just 80 years. I wish you all a Blessed Passover! Elisabeth Mac Michael,(Nee Goike)

(4)
Charles E Bernard, Jr,
March 25, 2007 2:39 PM

Wonderful anecdote about a courageous woman

I hope that you keep sending many more articles like this one. I have already sent it to my six children. Keep up the good work! Charles E. Bernard, Jr.

(3)
Anonymous,
March 25, 2007 2:37 PM

Morality in the face of death

It is difficult, in not incorrect to try to maintain a level of morality when dealing with animals, two or four legged, who are trying to kill you. Sometimes, unfortunately, the only thing some people understand is force and violence. There is truth to the saying "nice guys finish last"!

(2)
Anonymous,
March 25, 2007 9:05 AM

similarities

This is an excellent article, and makes a point similar to one made by Rabbi Milton Steinberg, in an essay comparing Hellenic and Jewish culture. I believe it was he who said, "The Greeks believed in the holiness of Beauty; the Jews believed in the beauty of Holiness." But I would add, that it has been Torah, and Torah alone, that has taught the world the holiness of Kindness.

(1)
Laya,
March 25, 2007 6:03 AM

well said!

Thank you for putting something so profound into words so simply and directly. May we Jews throughout the world 'get it' this year deeper than ever and bring Moshiach speedily.