Friday, October 28, 2016

The Secret Order of the "F" and the "E"

MEMO: June 22, 2013From: FBI SAIC, Columbus OHTo: Director of Homeland SecurityRe: Suspected Terrorist Group "Order of the 'F' and the 'E'"

The following are the transcripts of the listening devices planted in the designated meeting room of the target hotel.

Sound of knocking on door.Voice
#1: "Who is there?" [FBI Note: Data comparison with military recordings
identifies this voice as a renegade colonel who left the Air Force
under curious circumstances and has been involved with this terrorist
group for some years.]Voice #2: "Me ... Ted ... a friend ... Oh,
yeah, I forgot ... a new brother in the order of the 'F' and the 'E'
asks for entry into the conclave." [FBI Note: Data comparison with court
transcripts identifies Voice #2 as a lawyer from Dallas, Texas. Further
analysis of archives indicates that while this group has existed for
years they did not begin using the name "the F and the E" until the last
year.]Voice #1: "Did you bring refreshments?"Voice #2: "I found this bag of stale Fritos in my car." [FBI Note: The meaning of this codeword is unclear at this time.]Voice #1: "Enter, brother."Voice #2: "Sorry, I had trouble finding this place. It's not listed in the program."Voice #1: "Of course it isn't. We're not part of that bunch at the convention center." [FBI Note: Reference unclear.]Voice
#3: "You mean they threw us out for 'treason' after last year when you
had to go do your own thing and take us with you." [FBI Note: Keyword
"treason" resulted in this conversation being pulled from the Echelon
Intercept Database for further analysis.]Voice #4: "Hey, we had a better time last year than ever before. No hassles, no rules, lower cost ..."Voice #3: "No food court, no dealer hall, no seminars, no new products, and he didn't even show up."Voice #1: "Stop complaining. They threw us out."Voice #5: "Not technically. We could have come here."Voice
#1: "Not me, and not most of us. Most of us had kids in school and
could not be here after they changed the schedule." [FBI Note: The
phrase "kids in school" is thought to mean "terrorists in training
camp." The reference to a change in schedule may be why no terrorist
attack was detected during the previous 12 months. Twenty-three field
agents are digging into that.]Voice #4: "You weren't followed, were you?"Voice
#2: "No, I went through the Puffing Billy room to make sure I lost any
tail in the crowd. [FBI Note: The phrase "Puffing Billy room" is thought
to refer to a nearby Amtrack station. Fifteen field agents are now
checking that facility for any suspicious devices.]Voice #1: "Now that Brother Ted is here, can we get going?"Voice
#3: "That's gonna be kinda hard after the fuzz confiscated all of our
counters." [FBI Note: The term "fuzz" refers to law enforcement. The
meaning of "counters" may refer to dangerous radiological materials or
perhaps drugs.]Voice #4: "Yeah, some idiot had to haul his cartload
of counters right past the registration desk. Those Gamma goons said
that they were prohibited because of last year's incident." [FBI Note:
The term "goon" is a clear reference to prison guards. Based on this,
the Greek letter "gamma" is thought to refer to the Federal supermax
prison at Marion, Illinois. This part of the conversation is thought to
refer to a failed attempt to smuggle contraband to terrorist suspects
imprisoned at Marion.]Voice #1: "They had no right to take my
counters. The US Constitution doesn't allow them to do that." [FBI Note:
Another reference to "counters" which may refer to radiological devices
intended to cause a mass-casualty event, i.e., a "dirty bomb." It is
well known that terrorist groups try to use their "constitutional
rights" to subvert the needs for reasonable homeland security
requirements.]Voice #6: "I think I got this worked out. The peanuts
are the clinks. The raisins are the Feds. The candy corn are the
furballs, and the Hershey's kisses are the rockheads." [FBI Note:
Analysis of these codewords is ongoing. The "Feds" are obviously Federal
law enforcement agencies. The term "clinks" may refer to prison
guards.]Voice #7: "What about the gorns and roms?" [FBI Note: The
term "roms" may refer to the Romney campaign staff, but this is unclear.
No one has identified what a "gorn" is. The only reference in the
database is to one episode of a 1960s television show and obviously
irrelevant.]Voice #6: "We won't get around to them for a week. We can find something in the meantime."Voice
#8: "You mean I can find something in the meantime. You already used
all my snacks for counters. Why don't you use Ted's stale Fritos for the
snakes?" [FBI Note: The term "snakes" is unclear but may relate to the
Israeli codeword "viper" which means "nerve gas."]Sound of knocking on door.Voice #4: "Cheeze it, the Gamma goons!"Voice #5: "Ted, you were followed, you idiot!"Voice #3: "Hide the maps!"Voice #1: "Calm down, everyone! ... Who is there?"Voice
#9: "The Mentor, a friend to the order." [FBI Note: This codename is
thought to refer to a native-born American terrorist suspect with former
connections to military intelligence and a radical Texas-based militia
group.]Voice #1: "Enter, Mentor."Voice #9: "Sorry for the delay.
Jean would not let me out of the booth while the media was hanging
around. She sent brownies." [FBI Note: "Jean" has been identified as a
college professor from the southeastern US whom even liberal colleagues
refer to as "radical." The term "booth" may refer to a secret terrorist
headquarters. It is thought that "media" may refer to Homeland Security
agents. The term "brownie" clearly refers to marijuana.]Voice #3: "He brought counters!"Voice #6: "Real ones?"Voice
#9: "I am a river to my people." [FBI Note: This phrase is commonly
used by Middle Eastern warlords who spread a small portion of the money
collected from bribes and other corrupt activities to the population to
maintain loyalty. Refer to Anthony Quinn in the movie "Lawrence of
Arabia" for an example.]Voice #3: "He brought seltorians!" [FBI
Note: Other references to "seltorians" as "bugs" may mean this is code
for electronic listening devices.]Voice #9: "Just got them from the
printer." [FBI Note: The term "printer" is possibly a reference to an
organized crime group that sells weapons and explosives to terrorist
groups on a "no questions asked" basis.]Voice #1: "Did you bring rules for the seltorians?" [FBI Note: The term "rules" refers to detailed plans for an attack.]Voice #9: "Nah, I figured we'd just wing it."END OF TRANSCRIPT

This group obviously poses a clear and present danger to the American
people. The immediate arrest of the entire group is suggested at the
earliest opportunity.

About Me

Amarillo Design Bureau, Inc. is a game-publishing company that creates and publishes games based on the Original Series of Star Trek. We have a contract with Paramount Pictures to do so. Posts and blogs that are not directly related to gaming are the opinions of the individuals who write them, and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Amarillo Design Bureau, Inc.