Enemies of the Body Compass

Maybe you’ve read my last post and have been trying to get in touch with your Body Compass. For some reason, you just can’t seem to access it. You’re starting to feel frustrated and may even be entertaining some doubts as to whether or not you’ll ever be able to find it.

If this sounds familiar, know that what you are feeling is completely normal. Of all of the coaching tools I’ve shared, this one is ranked by my clients as one of the hardest.

When you’re in the realm of real, deep change, you’re going to experience some opposition. There will be times (perhaps even many) when forces, both internal and external, will try to sabotage readings from your Body Compass and you’ll need to be both insightful and brave to tackle them.

Below are some of the most common problems clients have told me they encounter when trying to access their Body Compasses. I’ve included what I usually suggest to help them get back on track:

Problem: Each time you try to feel something out to see if your Body Compass is reading positive or negative, you have a barrage of negative , worrisome thinking. These negative thoughts distract you, and accessing your Body Compass feels like a futile attempt.

What’s really going on: Your lizard, afraid of lack and attack, tries to override your Body Compass, because it’s afraid of the consequences of you taking any new kind of action. Most likely, you’re not even close to living your best life and in order for you to do this, you’re going to have to make some major, sweeping changes. Your lizard’s terrified and thus tries to sabotage your attempt at facing the truth.

Solution: Write down your lizard fears and your worries (which are usually worst-case scenarios). Then, brainstorm and write how you would deal with even the worst possible scenarios you can imagine. (My lizard, which was forever telling me I would end up homeless one day, was silenced after I interviewed a homeless man who told me how I could successfully survive on the streets). Now that you’ve faced your inner demons and created a strategic plan to deal with each of them, try again to access your Body Compass.

Problem: You are able to access your Body Compass and you’ve started taking some actions to move you in a positive direction. Your friends and/or family start saying critical remarks about the changes you’ve made and now you’re finding it difficult to access your Body Compass at all.

What’s really going on: Your nearest and dearest are intimidated or threatened because you’re doing things differently. Their critical and judgmental remarks have given your lizard some power and your self-doubt is preventing you from hearing the sacred messages your Body Compass is trying to send you.

Solution: Find some quiet time and space where you can relax and be completely alone. It’s best if you pick an environment you love and can be with yourself for an entire weekend. During this time, check in with your Body Compass for small, non-threatening decisions (like what you’d like to eat for dinner or what outfit you’d like to wear) and gradually build yourself back up to reading your Body Compass regularly.

Problem: When you started accessing your Body Compass, you began to get very afraid of what you felt and almost immediately after this feeling surfaced, you were unable to access your Body Compass again. Perhaps you even accessed a big, uncomfortable truth during the exercise and ever since then, you’ve been unable to access any feelings or physical sensations.

What’s really going on: You’re secretly terrified to uncover your feelings because you’re afraid of what you’ll realize. You’ve probably put a lot of time, energy, money and/or love into something that is not in your best interest and acknowledging this may mean you’ll have to let it go, which scares you to death. Other social factors, including your social conditioning, may block messages from your Body Compass as well if they challenge the social norms of your cultural group because you fear being abandoned by those you love.

Solution: Take a break (about 1-2 weeks) from trying to access your Body Compass. Denial is an important psychological protective mechanism, and you may not yet be ready to face the inevitable loss that lies ahead. Blocking your Body Compass readings may actually be something you need right now. Once the 1-2 weeks is over, try again to access it, but this time with very small, non-threatening things that have no effect on your personal or professional life (like what color of ink pen to use). Then gradually, if you feel ready, try this tool out on bigger, more personal things.

When it comes to any coaching tools that will assist you in creating real change in your life, there will always and inevitably be some resistance . Be prepared for these obstacles, deal with them when they arise and you will be able to successfully access this incredible tool.