consciousness rising- 8-26-16

The ordinariness of my life had run its course. It collapsed long before the finish line. I had paced myself, but it didn’t matter, God had other plans.
When a storm blows long enough, and hard enough, you better take cover.
I was in my storm of the century. It started to test the consciousness of my being, I pushed back, and the shell broke. My consciousness flowed out. Things inside me frozen for decades flowed again.
In my old life, I couldn’t take on one more thing. Making the coffee had become an undertaking.
Stress was sucking away my life. I internalized so much I thought mattered, but didn’t. I thought that if I broke down, everything around me would stop working. I was wrong.
I was forced to slow down with a diagnosis of MS, after pushing full speed ahead for 58 years.
A lurking question resurfaced, dredged up by the storm: what is the meaning of life?
It wasn’t what I thought. This time the answer changed everything.
I discovered I was not who I thought I was. Continuing to be “that” guy, was going to kill me. I’m not through living.
I had created an identity for 35 years of being a home builder. That’s who I thought I was. My identity melted like an ice cube in the sun.
The shell around me was gone. What was left is who I am. I am love.
I started looking at me as if I was a third party. I asked myself: Did what I was doing help me, to be me.
I thought I would transition to a slower pace, but God had other plans.
I started to unlearn everything I thought I knew about life. Very little existed as truth at face value. There were a lot of questions, and I was first in line.
I started reinventing myself. I quit living from my mind and started living from my heart and soul.
When you live from your heart, you feel the emotions and vibrations of those around you. I am connected to our source, the universal intelligence, call it what you like. The only agenda is loving and helping or serving others. Love is the strongest energy in the universe.
I’ve learned the importance of time, to take the time to contemplate what we face, to take the time to tend to these things in a thoughtful loving way.
The past is in the past, it doesn’t matter.
The meaning of life is to create the world as you want it to be for the highest good of all.
My world has changed. I see it differently, and it sees me differently. I’m learning what means to be living in the light.
I love writing about consciousness and enlightenment questions, so if you want to share one, please do. Leave it in the comments and we will find the answers together.

Published by Boo Barksdale

1 thought on “consciousness rising- 8-26-16”

Hey Boo, thanks so much for sharing your story. I have a similar one. My body broke down in 2009 and I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, turns out now it is Rheumatoid Arthritis and Osteoporosis. However I still believe that it’s because of years of living off-purpose and as I found myself again, and did a lot of inner work, I regained some health (it’s a work-in-progress), and am finding the path back to where I was always meant to be. The universe has plans for us all, if we’re willing to listen. Thanks for your insights.