My orgasms are no-shows

I've never had an orgasm, so I took your advice and bought a vibrator and a sexy book, which are working. Sort of. It's like climbing up onto a diving board but instead of jumping off, I just bounce a bit then climb back down. I'm so annoyed with myself. What am I doing wrong?

How about the fact that it's supposed to be fun? You're putting yourself under too much pressure. You start out well - allowing your mind to lead you deeper into your fantasy -but when you get close, you abandon those gorgeous sexy thoughts and turn into a bossy orgasm monitor demanding that you come - here and now! Having an orgasm isn't like jumping - it's not something you can consciously decide to do; it won't be forced. A woman's orgasm is more like falling; like rolling over the edge - you just have to allow it. Focus on building your fantasies and practise staying with them. The more you explore your sex thinking, the closer you'll come to reaching your full sexual potential.

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