Followers

Top Commenters

Blog Roll

Thursday, September 18, 2008

We sat down across from each other on leather couches. As I tried to settle in and look professional, my squirming produced a "tasteless" noise. I didn't actually toot, it just sounded like it. Honest.

I really hoped he understood that.

For the rest of the interview, I sat as still as a statue...which is very hard for me. I think I like to change positions a lot. (no bad jokes here, please)

If the sitting still so as not to make a farting noise, sweat and gut cramps weren't enough, the questions began (Tell me about a work situation you had that required excellent communication skills.)...and I swear every single one of my answers started with this phrase: "Well, I haven't really had this experience, but the closest I can come to it is this..."

I swear.

Holy heck.

I was pulling answers out my hiney...honest and creative answers/solutions to the hypotheticals he suggested, but probably not exactly the answers he was looking for.

He took notes. Probably so he could laugh at my answers later with his friends.

My job history has no customer service...I've worked summer jobs as a teen in law office and dental office...I volunteered at children's hospitals and in ICU's. I currently coach a children's soccer team. I've been a nanny, a medical transcriptionist and am currently free lance writer.

I put myself out there, honestly and wholeheartedly, but no one wants me yet. It's a tough feeling. Exposing your self, like running naked through the mall (I hate the mall), and then having everyone ignore you...begging for attention and getting none.

Every job I ever got, when I went to the interview, I honestly felt like I could care less if I got the job or not. The jobs that I went in really wanting I never got. What is up with that? My BFF is currently looking for a job feeling the same way you are.

When I sit on farty furniture, I make sure to move even more just to show all those around me that it wasn't my hiney but the furniture making those noises. I'm not sure if it works .. maybe they just think I have astronmical amounts of gas *shrug*

If you haven't found anyone that wants you, that just means you haven't found a place good enough for you to work at! Keep your head up! :o)

Oh, and try running naked through Wal-Mart .. wait, never mind. We that shop at Wal-Mart have seen it all. Go to Target! You might even get thrown out! Bonus points!! ;o)

You said "toot" and "positions" in the first few paragraphs. And I was laughing.

And then I got to the end and felt all sad. There is a job out there for you. Please don't think I'm being flippant when I say this, but I hope that job requires you to don that pink hat and those pink boots. Seriously. It's just YOU, ya know?

Good luck Rhea! Just be yourself and don't worry about the bozo's doing the interviewing...you can interview well but do a crappy job and then again you can do crappy at interviews and be an outstanding employee...I would have farted loudly and laughed and then said, "I'm sorry, twat did you say?"

Well thank goodness you told us the rest of the story! The second you said leather couches I knew what was coming! ROFL! You poor, humiliated thing you! Don't worry, you'll get a job. I don't know why you want one, but you'll get one!

One of my favorite jobs I had was as a recruiter for a large credit card company. All I did all day was interview people for a job in the credit card call center. I loved it, interviewing people and talking to them and asking them questions. I know it's hard to be interviewed, people were always telling me how nervous they were. If you're not already doing this, whenever possible in the interview SMILE! And if you can, practice your interviewing skills with someone. Like do a mock interview. Or interview yourself and ask yourself questions. There are a zillion books at the library about how to interview and they come with interview questions. Check one out on "how to interview." Good luck!

Man, I hate the interview process. From both sides. I always feel like the biggest ass when answering questions and feel like a jerk when I'm interviewing people. Keeping my fingers crossed for ya! The right opportunity will come along that will be a good fit for you, I'm sure. :-)

After being at home, I don't think I could have come up with any answers. I am sweating for you just reading this. Hang in there and don't beat yourself up. When I was in grad school, they said it takes 99 no's to get to that one yes. You have 98 more to go. Go get 'em.

It has been 11 years since I had to do one. Oh wait, I actually had to do it again 2 years ago when I interviewed for a supervisor job (yikes, forgot about that for a moment, had to have two different interviews). Today I know something that would of helped me back then. That is to pop a Valium 30 minutes before the interview! lol

I was filling out my application with the Sheriff's Department in our small town (large county, several small towns) and the line read: Name three people who have known you for over five years and to whom you are not related." Looking over at the Sheriff's secretary (my cousin) and the Chief Deputy (yes, cousin) and the Chief Magistrate (my Uncle) I told them "I'm on line 5, how bout I just skip this part." Hope you find the job suited to you and enjoy it as much as I enjoyed mine!Sandi