MEGAN FOX DOES MARILYN

Hey everybody, welcome to Newsfeed. I'm your host Mike Polk and I'm still trying to grasp this show's concept.
You know, there are a lot of problems in the world everybody. Dire issues that effect us all as a global community. But... Megan Fox is getting a tattoo removed from her arm so let's just hold off on all that other stuff and focus on what's important.
The tattoo in question is of Marilyn Monroe, a gorgeous idiot who was a terrible actress. But despite what you might think, Megan's not getting the tattoo removed because it feels redundant.
I'll admit that when I first heard that Megan was getting rid of an unsightly mistake she had made that had outlived it's usefulness, I thought she was breaking up with Brian Austin Green.
Removing the tattoo is a slow process, and Megan says that the laser really hurts. When asked to further quantify the pain, she said it's almost as painful as watching "Jonah Hex" but not quite as excruciating as watching "Jennifer's Body".
Megan, if you're watching this, and let's face it, you are, I just want you to say that it's a solid move for you to get rid of some tattoos. Otherwise people might start to think you look kind of trampy.
I'm Mike Polk and you've just been fed. How'd that taste?