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Sexual milestones to cross as a couple

In an interview in the Harvard Business Review, John M Gottman, executive director, Relationship Research Institute, US, says, "Good relationships are about small moments of attachment and intimacy." And along with the emotional milestones, the landmarks you cross in bed, too, are equally important in making a happy relationship. To be accepted wholly when you are at your most vulnerable is a test every couple must pass, and crossing these passion points will help you know where you stand.

Milestone: The first time you have sex with the lights onStatus check: I'm not nervous around you anymore Yes, that is exactly where you have arrived in your relationship. You are no longer rushing to switch off the lights and dim out the 'flaws' you fear will scare him away. You are ready to show him every inch of you just as it is and know that he will love it too.Milestone: The first time you orgasm with himStatus check: Now we are there for each other in more ways than one Well, you know what we mean. You may have met the big O by yourself many times, but when it is with the one you think is 'the one', then it holds more than a special place in your heart. Icing on the cake? When you can't wait to then get started on round two.

Milestone: The first time you indulge in oral sex with himStatus check: I trust you Sex is an act of sweet surrendering in itself, but when you let someone go down on you and vice-versa, it is an act of showing that you trust them completely to allow them to love you in ways you never thought you would. Milestone: The first awkward moment in bedStatus check: Now I believe you do accept me as I am When you can laugh off moments like breaking wind or when certain things get stuck in places they shouldn't, you know you have hit new levels of intimacy. More than discomfort, these moments amuse you and you simply add them to the list of quirks you absolutely adore about your partner. Unconditional love and how!Milestone: The first time you say no to sexStatus check: When you realise you are in it for more than just sexIt isn't uncommon to say no when you are too tired to have sex. To be able to say so honestly and without hurting your partner's feelings is the moment you realise that the relationship is held together by more strings than just that of lust. And saying no to sex doesn't mean you won't cuddle!

Milestone: When you experiment for the first timeStatus check: I’m open to trying new things with you Being ready to try new positions in the bedroom means that you are open to taking chances with your SO. You are keen to have a satisfying love life and aren’t scared of experimenting with your partner. You also trust him and are willing to try new things with him.