Tag Archives: Rape

I stumbled across this video on The Guardian’s website. It is rather chilling. It features Danish activist against non-consensual pornography, Emma Holten and she shares her experience and how she managed to overcome the victim shaming and blaming and the impact of revenge porn in her life. The video I believe really deserves a watch BUT it may not be safe for work although its actually quite tame. Just a heads up to anyone who has a conservative boss or colleagues.

Just stop for a second and try to imagine… WAKING UP AND SEEING YOUR PICTURES OF YOUR NAKED BODY ALL OVER THE INTERNET? Maybe you are not one of those people who does the ‘nude’ image thing – fine, me either, but what else is potentially as damaging? Think about other things you’ve shared online, ‘in private’ that we wouldn’t want others to see – conversations, opinions, edited images of people you don’t like, thoughts about your boss – whatever and we are potentially exposing ourselves to greater harm. Just like in the case of nude pictures. In the hands of a malicious hacker, who is known or even unknown to you, there could be dire consequences…. Emma dealt with this in a unique way by addressing the issue head on with posing nude consensually which as she explains in the video a lot of people found counter intuitive however she explains that the deeper meaning behind doing it – she consented to it.

“Consent is key. I did this.

Just as rape and sex have nothing to do with each other;

Pictures shared with and without this consent are completely different things. ”

I don’t know if consensually posting nude images online is the solution to this debate but it certainly creates a stir and gets people to think about the greater picture (no pun intended). It certainly screams a lot of girl power… and let’s be honest this chick has balls! I believe this video is powerful in empowering others who have been in this situation.

I think sometimes we all need a reality check. We live in a society, especially in South Africa where violence against women exists and rape culture is a very real thing. I do not want to make everyone live in fear but just a gentle nudge, that hey, this is real, it’s happening… and obviously not only in South Africa.

I am not sure if you have been following the terribly sad news of the recent spate of gang rapes in India in the past several months, however the Times of India newspaper is currently running a set of adverts imploring men to treat women with respect through the stark statement,

“The true test of your manhood is how you treat a woman. All woman. Any woman. Every woman.”

Personally, I’m pleased the newspaper is questioning the traditional aspects of toxic masculinity, like “rash driving” and “drunken brawls“, which some men do think defines their manhood. Yet, I also think their conclusion about proving your manhood by behaving a certain way (even if its the right way) is problematic : “If you do not respect a woman, you are only half a man.”

That’s the flip side of the same thinking that says guys aren’t manly if they don’t want sex all the time. Just like sexist expectations of femininity can imprison women, sexist expectations can imprison men, too.

I’m all for eradicating rape culture and believe that South Africa could truly learn something from shocking adverts of a similar nature. But is the answer to tell men to act like “real men? In my opinion, no. It’s time to tell them to act like good men.

The first Johannesburg SlutWalk took place on this past Saturday – 24th of September through the streets of Rosebank. The SlutWalk initiative started on 24th of January this year in Canada when a representitive of the Toronto police department gave a shocking insight to into the forces view of sexual assault on woman by saying “woman should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized”. SlutWalk is a movement in a response to this remark and has slowly moved throughout the world and had found itself in Johannesburg this weekend.

Hundreds of Johannesburg residents on Saturday marched through the streets of Rosebank for the SlutWalk protest. Protesters dressed in bunny ears, bikinis and stilettos braved the cold weather to show their solidarity to victims of rape and sexual abuse. Wigs, feather boas and a little bit of nudity were also thrown into the mix. Friends of mine that happened to attend in support of the cause said that they had a great time – and told me they were chanting things such as “a dress does not mean yes!”. One of the marshals donned fishnet stockings under her vest. Several motorists hooted at demonstrators in support.

SlutWalk Jozi is affiliated with the #ISaidNo project. If you have been a victim of sexual assault visit them here www.isaidno.co.za. Only by breaking the silence, can we start to make a difference.

Did anyone else go to this walk? Let me know what you wore! Even if you didn’t and would go… what would you wear? I think I’d be tempted to wear a nuns habit just for shits and giggles!