An Important Update on Arizona and the National Fat Tax

A couple of years ago, I profiled Irwin Leba, a retired fast-food magnate leading a political movement to tax Americans based on their BMIs instead of their incomes. Leba's preposterous "fat tax" was, of course, an Esquire April Fool's Day hoax, perpetrated with the help of veteran prankster Alan Abel (Leba spelled backward). As usual, truth is stranger than fiction. Last week, the state of Arizona proposed its own obesity tax to help close the state's budget gap. I thought I'd catch up with Abel-cum-Leba to get his take on this latest development.

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JOSHUA FOER: Irwin, you must be thrilled to see your years of tireless advocacy transformed into legislation.

IRWIN LEBA: It's always flattering when someone steals your idea. I applaud Arizona. Of course, our goal is still to abolish the income tax at the national level, and institute a fat tax in its place. We'd like everyone to weigh in on April 15, and pay five dollars a pound for the aggregate weight of their family, including pets. We believe this is a solid plan to abolish the debt.

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JF: But isn't a fat tax kind of regressive?

IL: Well, older people are typically thinner and shorter, so they'd avoid paying higher taxes as they age. And poor people could just eat less.

JF: That doesn't sound very healthy.

IL: Hotel and motel beds are giving people curvature of the spine, because fat people leave behind permanent gullies. That is not healthy.

JF: Last time we spoke, you were looking for a national spokesman for the fat tax. Any luck on that front?

IL: We're organizing a cross-country tour of heavyset people. We'll stop in major cities and do a program with a major song and dance routine. We're going to be using shock value to inform the public. I want to have a public demonstration where we have someone eat too much food and then throw it up. If you're on tour, you can get away with vomiting from a moving bus without repercussions.