Penelope Cruz Is an Ass Man

Actress Penelope Cruz has made her directorial debut with a five-minute commercial for Agent Provocateur, promoting L'Agent, the lingerie line she designed with her sister Monica, an equal opportunity international smoke show.

The "short film" plays like an extended promo for a boutique hotel, complete with dulcet elevator trance soundtrack.

However, Cruz's first time behind the camera is notable for its adoring gaze on the female posterior. Unlike downmarket Victoria's Secret commercials, which tend to focus on T's over A's, Cruz just can't stop filming comely culos.

Look, there is one lounging next to a foot fetishist on a throw rug. Observe another arched, its owner on all fours. In a kiddie pool, on a staircase, atop a banquet table, up a ladder, where can't these butts go?

Unfortunately, by the time her husband Javier Bardem shows up at the end of the ad, everyone is fully clothed.