More Homosexual Teen-agers `Coming Out` At Younger Age

BOSTON — Antonio, 15, still wears braces. Like most adolescents, he alternates between bravado and sensitivity. Unlike most, he is a self-proclaimed homosexual.

A member of a new generation of gay youngsters, Antonio has known of his sexual preference for three years. Rather than fight it or steep himself in shame and remorse, as many millions before him have, Antonio discussed it with his parents and a psychologist and joined a Boston group for gay youth.

Spurred by growing attention in the media and acknowledgments of homosexuality by well-known figures in sports, entertainment and politics, gays are ``coming out`` at a younger age, often as early as 15. This has led to a new phenomenon: declared homosexuals who have had virtually no sex.

``Kids are coming out at a much earlier age than they used to,`` said Kevin Cranston, a Harvard Divinity student and social worker who specializes in counseling gay people. ``Some are not even waiting till they finish high school. They`re coming out before they have sex. They`re establishing their identities and having happier adolescences. It used to be that a gay young person had sex and dealt with the consequences afterwards. Today some of these kids date and wait for the right person to come along. AIDS has strongly reinforced that prudence. By reversing the order, many gay people have healthier sex and healthier lives.``

Antonio said he has had only one brief sexual experience and is waiting to grow up a bit and find the right partner. ``Most people think gay means sex. But it doesn`t, just like being straight doesn`t mean sex.

``My parents have pulled me through a lot of things,`` Antonio said before a recent meeting of the Boston Alliance of Gay and Lesbian Youth. ``But I lead a double life. At school, I act tough. Only here can I act naturally. I`d like to tell my friends at school about myself but they are paranoid about AIDS. They think that if you touch a gay person you get it.``

Guidance counselors and social workers have begun in the past year or two to discuss teen-age homosexuality at annual seminars and conventions. ``We`re just now at the stage of consciousness-raising,`` said George Proulx, director of counseling at Minnechaug Regional High School outside Springfield, Mass., and a recent president of the Massachusetts Association of School Guidance Counselors. ``We`re not yet really at the point of confronting what to do about it but we`re on the brink.``

Jean Riseman, a social worker who directs the Merrimack Valley Counseling Associates 30 miles north of Boston, helped set up Gay and Lesbian Liberated Youth of the North Shore (GALLYNS), an alcohol- and drug-free group for gay youths between the ages of 14 and 22. ``What`s so nice about GALLYNS is seeing the kids play the piano together, go out to eat pizza, do all the things other kids take for granted,`` she said. ``This kind of thing didn`t happen even 10 years ago.``

John Dixon, who acts as adult advisor to GALLYNS, said: ``The most tragic thing about being a gay adolescent is you have no peers or role models. That`s why GALLYNS is so important.``

Weston Jenks, director and founder of counseling at Boston College, said that because young people are expressing their sexual preferences at an earlier age today, some counselors are becoming better equipped to deal with the issue.

``Not everyone who has had a homosexual experience or inclination is gay,`` he said. ``The work of the counselor is to try to help the young person to sort that out. People either are or are not gay. Just as some people are left-handed and most are right-handed, some people are gay and most are heterosexual. A counselor`s job is to help a person realize his orientation, dispel myths, see how life can be lived in a way that is not self-destructive. It`s useless to try to change someone.``

Interviews with several dozen young homosexuals revealed no clear pattern to their backgrounds. They are rich, poor and middle-class, bright and dim- witted, handsome and unattractive. They come from loving, ``normal,`` church-going homes and unhappy, broken ones. Their parents accept them and spurn them.

Six years ago, the American Psychiatric Association removed homosexuality from its list of disorders. Today, some scientists are publishing evidence suggesting that sexual preference is set by a combination of genetic and early environmental factors, and is unchangeable by age 12 and possibly by age 6.

Given the sensitivity of the subject and adult fears of encouraging adolescent homosexuality, schools have so far done little to ease the paths for gay youth. But that may change.

``My feeling had been that it was not a major issue,`` said John McGourty, director of alternative programming and a former district superintendent for the Boston Public School Department. ``But I wonder if this isn`t an area that in the next five to 10 years the schools will have to attend to.``