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It seems like for the left one you got a good shape. I've seen a lot of early pens including mine where there was a sort of a fear of turning off all the wood and the pen is thick with rounded ends to meet the hardware.

You can be proud of those as first pens . On the first one , the upper barrel is perfect to my eyes but the lower barrel would be a bit better if it were a hair fatter , like the upper barrel . I would guess the center of the upper barrel to be 5-10 thou greater diameter than the center band or clip end . That is the range I target for . Of the other two , I prefer the top one for the same reasons .