"I never apologize. I'm sorry, but that's just the way I am."
~Homer Simpson

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Sick and tired

I've talked about my aches and pains before, and if you need a refresher go ahead and click here. Yep, this is going to be another piss and moan post about how I feel because quite frankly I'm ready to take a saw and hack off my limbs one at a time. All while I nap of course, because I can't seem to stop sleeping.

A couple weeks ago I had to leave work early 'cause I was falling asleep during times I shouldn't have been falling asleep. I had to call off the next day because I was so weak and tired I could hardly move. I spent the day laying on the couch watching movies, and sleeping. Didn't eat much, no energy to even try.

Just a few days ago I had the same problem and it was so bad I'd go into the bathroom, rest my chin on my hand, and take a ten minute snooze while gettin' a nice ripe toilet ring on my butt. I did that twice. And slept during lunch. And on the bus. I tried so hard to not have to go home early - it was torture, but I did it. I then spent my weekend a weak sleepy zombie.

Add to that this mysterious pain in my arms. The steroid I was given didn't do a damn thing, and it has progressively gotten worse. I feel a constant hot burning pain in my elbows and my right shoulder, and occasional pain throughout my arms. It doesn't come and go, it is always there. I'm now feeling slight ache (which is how it started in my elbows) in my hip flexors and in my knees. So basically I hurt EVERYWHERE. Tuesday I'm going to see a neurologist to see if he can figure out why I'm hurting. It's not arthritis and it's not nerve inflammation, and my bloodwork looks good. Damned if I know, but I am desperate to find out.

If anyone reading this has any inkling into why I am so tired (even with a diagnosis of Epstein Barr, I have no other symptoms of mono when I am suffering from such fatigue) and why my joints, and what feels like my bones, hurt so much... throw me a bone. Pun intended? Anyway, I'm following doctor's orders - taking vitamins and sleeping when I need to sleep. It still sucks.

If anyone's wondering why it's taken me so long to write anything, it's because I've been in a semi-comatose state for a while. Tonight I feel OK, tired-wise. Pain-wise I'm near tears from the frustration if nothing else. Please excuse me now while I go pout and try to get rid of the raging headache that's butted its way into my house of pain.