Monthly Archives: January 2012

I am back at work with a small sense of I will not be there for long and that I was there for a reason. OK. If that is true what is or are the reason/s?

“Behind the mask” This is a 3d painting/ sculpture, when a shadow is cast over the picture or the lights are turned off the eyes illuminate, this can be seen in the top rhs photo. The mask represents different sides of every person alive, we all have them even if we don’t believe so.

I have been painting for a few weeks and put many feelings and experiences onto canvas in an abstract fashion, a few were 3 dimensional, part sculpture and painting and one had some electronics added to power illuminated eyes. I think my painting is helping me feel better. I seem to have managed a few interesting paintings, not quite what I envisioned but sort of more intriguing and even more accurate than planned. 2 paintings in particular have actually scared a few people. I guess this means I have managed to get some of my emotions (demons) into them.

"Well Disguised" Number 3 in the series. Somethings are not what they seem. Old proverb: 'One who is clothed in good deeds is well disguised'

I still have little faith left in myself and my beliefs. This is sad because a year ago I would have said that it was all working for me, now I feel like maybe I had mislead people I cared for by my beliefs even though a few say I helped change their lives for the better. I hope I am just going through one of the universes tests and I do hope I pass it. Is any of this worth it? I am not sure but I know I cannot live how I have been as I do not want to exist doing what I am good at without loving it or at the least enjoying it, I want to do what I love.