WATCH: Is It Offensive To Ask If Someone Is Gay?

yes. That little homo Andy Cohen asked me if I swim in the Lady pond. He will be killed soon.

Oprah

No.

I don't think its offensive but its a strange question to ask someone you just met or don't know well. Its like why do you give a shit?

Bi%20female

No

Maybe someone is looking for instructions? Not everyone gets issued the How-to-Gay manual.

Mine%20fell%20apart%20years%20ago.

Yes. There is no gay, or straight.

There is only Zuul.

yes

It depends on how well you know the person. One of the most tone deaf questions well meaning straight people ask is "when did you first know you were gay?" as if the glimpse of one magnificent male ass is what flipped a switch.

Um you need my full sentence there. It is a strange question to ask someome you don't know well. You could argue it borderlines homophobia. I mean why should they give a shit if you are if they are not a friend or family member. I can't stand random people asking me if i'm gay or not. I don't know you, you're not my mom and we're not dating so why do you want to know? To bash me?

I don't believe in labels.

Not%20gay%20Nick%20Gruber%2C%20CK%27s%20ex

In theory there should is absolutely nothing offensive about it. However we don't live in such an enlightened society that every gay person feels comfortable and trust strangers.
A lot does have to do it with the tone in which you ask the question.

How often do you ask someone if they are straight?

My son has asked a couple of his roommates if they're gay. The first one he asked because on his facebook page it had interested in men. The second roommate he had over the summer he asked because the guy acted more stereotypical. No one took offense but maybe that's because they were both gay.

Would it be ok to ask someone you hardly know if they're a Christian, Jew or Muslim?

People are way too nosy these days. I remember a straight acquaintance once telling me that she was trying to find out if her gay counselor was the "wife" or the "husband" in the relationship.
I responded that others made up lies about me and who I was dating and why all of the time, and that they just needed to get their own life.

I always wonder why people are so curious. My friend at work has told me that he's had people ask him about my sexuality. Does it effect how I do my job? They aren't working for the census bureau, so why should they care?

anonymous

OP wasn't speaking of someone you barely know, it's interesting that some of us interpreted it in this way. Are you in the closet?

R17 It seems to be human nature to try to put people in a box. Different makes them uncomfortable until they can categorize it. I used to get asked constantly by strangers about my race (i'm a mix of several races) and my nationality . It could happen anywhere like one time at a Panda Express by the guy behind the counter. Tell me what that has to do with beef and broccoli and fried rice.
Sometimes I think people like your coworker want to know so they can know who they can say things like, that's so gay or use other derogatory gay slurs around.

I dont think its offensive. Strange and maybe kind of tacky, yes. But not really offensive.

Wait. Andre Leon Talley is straight? Really??

OP, I cannot worry about the informing anyone who imagines that "you're" is a possessive.

No, but perhaps you should just ask if the man ever goes up into the man.

Anin%20but%20anal

It's a lot less offensive now that the closet is dead.

It's fine. It's a fundamental fact about someone. If someone chooses to be a public figure giving interviews about his private life the question should come up. He doesn't have to answer or he can say yes or no or he can dodge with "I don't believe in labels."
Let's face it--"I don't believe in labels" means "I have had same-sex relationships." Do we really have to insist the person says the magic words? Do we insist on knowing whether they are exclusively same-sex oriented?
Yes, having a celebrity say "I'm gay" advances acceptance of gay people. (Especially someone who doesn't fit the stereotype.) Let's say that's a home run. "I'm bisexual" is a triple. "I don't believe in labels" is a solid double. It's better than a lie which is a strike out.
You don't hear baseball fans booing a double because they wanted a triple.

[quote]You're opinion, girls?
OP, why are you only seeking opinions from young females?
Will you be repeating 5th grade this year? That's where they teach the difference between "your" and "you're."

A Mormon doctor working the the clinic where I worked asked me if I was gay in front of his nurse and a patient. I was collecting a specimen in an examination room.
I looked at him and he quickly said "I am gay also", I assumed to ease my confession. Instead of answering the question I responded, no thanks, you aren't my type.

Depends totally upon the circumstances. THAT is the proper answer. One can tell if someone is being nosy or rude. Or should be able to tell. If someone asks me and it is in an improper or odd or awkward situation or is just plain rude, I will come back with "And that would be any of your business...why?" Or I will ask "Why are you asking?" The cuntier they are, the cuntier I can be.

Jesus--"I'm gay" is not a CONFESSION, R27.
Remember: We don't ADMIT being gay, we PROCLAIM it.

R29, SO true! Word choices reveal so much, yes? I was watching a news clip yesterday about that Bachelor contestant girl who killed herself and some other contestant, who had been on the show with her, said "It is just awful what happened to her." I immediately thought "Nothing happened TO her, honey. She killed HERSELF." Very revealing word choice.

I announce my sexuality while taking communion.

"You're opinion, girls?"
Is it offensive to ask if you were home-schooled, you illiterate cumquat?

Who cares about what girls think?

I'm female so I realize what I think doesn't count but it seems to me it's putting someone on the spot. If they wanted to be out you'd probably already know about it. If they don't want to be out then they are forced to lie or be uncomfortable evading the question.