Wednesday, July 11, 2012

When it rains it really does pour, and sometimes a lot of
bad things happen to really good people - but no cliché can accurately describe
what it’s like be in the eye of the storm while its raging. I’ve recently
watched several friends endure storm after storm after earthquake after tornado
after, well, you name it – it’s probably happened. Even as a mere onlooker I’m
being blown away by the whiplash of impact after sudden impact and yet the
grace with which these blows are being taken in stride is both dumbfounding and
awe inspiring at the same time.

I have a lot of friends under black clouds right now – loss,
uncertainty, injury, betrayal, sickness, and disappointment are plaguing way
too many of the people I care about. Practically, logistically, and morally it
has been easy to the point of being involuntary to push back against the
wrecking balls that have been swinging violently in my par view. In doing so,
I’ve gotten a lot of the “I’m sorry to ask you this, but…” or “I know you’re
busy but…” or “I’m so sorry – I know this puts so much on you…” or “Thank you so
much, you’re a life saver” or “You’re a saint”. No I’m really not… in fact, no to all
of the above. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that my friends are appreciative
– but it actually strikes me as alarming - since when are such basic acts of human compassion perceived as acts of valor?

As a
society, have we fundamentally become so far removed from the “do unto others”
mentality that it’s now considered an incredible act of kindness to actually come
through for people? That’s incredulous. I really did seriously contemplate the opening of this can of worms, but decided after investing over twenty years into the art of saying exactly what I think, its not worth employing the filter now. I have always been of the 'pay it
forward' school of thought – you do all the good you can, in all the ways you
can, for all the people you can, for as long as you can. Period. Why wouldn’t you? Because its not convenient,
because there’s nothing in it for you, or because you're just too busy? Shame on
you…

I have both weathered and witnessed many a rainy season in
my almost twenty-two years of living, and for every monsoon, I can think of two
kinds of people: the ones who built the arks, and the ones who dropped the
anchors. The ark builders are the ones who see the red sky in the morning, have
an ark built by high noon, and are dragging you onto it come hell and high water. The anchor droppers are
the ones who see the same sky, run for the hills, and drop their anchor –
pleading themselves as a source of stability from a distance, but never gaining
enough mobility to come through for you: AKA the textbook fair weather friend.
I’ll tell you a little secret – 90% of my ark builders have no idea that their
support was an ark in a flood of biblical proportions – but you can bet your
bottom dollar I’d do the exact same for them on any given day without giving a
moments pause to consider the storm I’ve just decided to weather. Maybe that
makes me crazy and irrational, but I’ll take that over the shallow apathetic
alternative.

It all comes back to how your treat people. I have seen
marriages fail, friendships destroyed, love lost, and reconciliation denied all
because self-absorption and complacency takes precedent over basic human
compassion. You take care of the people who take care of you… Perhaps that is
the point at which grace abounds.

So when the monsoon comes, which are you – the ark or the
anchor?

To all of my ark builders, thank you… and to my anchor
droppers, thank you too – you’ve taught me twice the lesson.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

So,
just in case you haven’t been in tune to the greater portion of the east coast
– we have endured an apocalypse of sorts. A Derecho storm ripped and roared
through here on Friday night, rivaling the tornado producing storms I used to
only encounter living in Oklahoma, and leaving comparable damage in its wake.
So much so that walking out the front door of my house the next morning – one
of the only few with power in the entire Commonwealth – was like a bad
combination of “Twister” and “After the Storm.” News stations reported the
storm as “the most damaging storm in Virginia history.” You don’t say…

The day
after was a day like any other – the sun came up, people had to go to work,
cars were on the road, and a weekend full of weddings was upon us. My friend
was one of the lucky ones getting married the day after the apocalypse. Little
did any of us know, there was no power at the venue. That little detail seemed
to escape the list of important things to tell the bride. Oops. Moving on –
through an act of God himself and a hard working staff, the venue was
beautified by the time we arrived, and despite no running water or electricity
of any kind, we were off to a good start. Heading down the road to get the
bride ready and what do we see? None other than a car EXPLODING into the air on
the side of the road. No lie. Dodged that bullet. I forgot to mention the
record-breaking heat wave we were encountering simultaneously with the storm. I am beginning to think the Mayans are onto something - it was literally so hot I saw the devil seeking shade. But, let me tell you
what - for no power, no prior natural disaster back up plan, and with
absolutely no warning - that wedding was absolutely breathtaking. I mean, would
you look at that picture? Just look at it. No one would know it was no less
than 100 degrees outside. I wish this beautiful couple all of the endless happiness they deserve - Mother Nature ain't got a thing on their wedding day.

So,
while the world was busy surviving the apocalypse, I was encountering one of my
own. The kind that build up inside when you let something fester, or when
you’re about to make a potentially life altering decision. My dilemma was the
latter. You see, I took this job working as a Public Relations associate at
SAKinterMedia in April. I knew I would like it, but I have actually found
myself hopelessly in love with this type of work. Let me preface the eye of the
storm by saying I am about to be a senior Music Education major who has devoted
the last 3.5 years of my life pursuing an education that prepares me for what
has now been an 8 year burning desire to teach music… And guess what I don’t
see myself doing anymore – teaching music. Therein lies the problem.

This
personal apocalypse lies in the current war within myself to pursue a Masters in
Education. I have sold my soul to grad school this summer to get ahead on my
degree so that I am free to travel next summer. In doing so, I’ve sort of hit the
career decision accelerator. I have to be pretty committed to being a teacher
to purse a Masters in Education – the problem is, I’m not. Don’t get me wrong –
I LOVE teaching music, always have, always will – but I think I falsified an
illusion that teaching full time would be comparable to what I do in the summer
when I teach leadership camps and band camps.

The
intensive week-long camps where you get the kids at square one and by the time
they go home they’re leaving with a sense of accomplishment, empowerment, and
enthusiasm is where it’s at for me. I have always had a passion for those kinds
of intense bursts of instilling positivity and cultivating change. I am a
chronic people pleaser: I motivate others, I am constantly seeking new sources
of inspiration, I strive to enable the dreams of others, and I experience
success of my friends, family, and co-workers as equal to my own, if not
greater. I am a people person – period.

I think
my biggest fear in life is a 9-5 cubicle job. I am simply not cut out for it. I
have nothing against those kinds of jobs, but personally, I’d be miserable. I
am a creative person by nature; I am a seeker of solutions and a defiant of the
impossible. I take it personally when people tell me something cannot be done.
I need to be in an environment where I can apply creativity, work with people,
and contribute positively to the world around me. I believe I have convinced
myself that teaching music was the only way to ensure I could really do that –
until now.

When I
started this job in Public Relations I was handed a book called Idea-Links: The
New Creativity by Jim Link. I read it, and it rocked my world. That book
single-handedly instigated a complete metamorphosis of the way in which I
experience life. The author talks about how every experience is a lesson, each
relationship is a network, and that the secret behind every success is an
Idea-Link. For clarification here is his definition: Idea-Link: (noun) a
succinct insight or realization about why or how something works or succeeds
that is stored into memory. He breaks creativity out of the confines of
stereotypes and shows you, through experience and practical application, that
successful creativity is achievable in any capacity. I salute you, Jim Link, that
was news to me.

Post reading
the book I have consciously and perpetually logged all of my experiences since
starting this job and have been absolutely stunned by the inter-connectivity of
all of the things I love to do. Everything can work together: writing, music,
photography, graphic design, networking, interacting with countless incredible
people – it ALL links together. Music will always be a huge part of my life –
it just might not BE my life in the way I have anticipated… and as foreign as
that is to admit, I’m okay with it.

I am
beyond over school, but I am committed to setting myself up with my best foot
forward. Finishing a Masters in Education is not wasted time even though it
feels like it – in fact I bet you I’ll have my own book of Idea-Links by the
time I’m done. Every experience is connected, and I might have found my calling
too little too late in the degree seeking world, but better late than never.
It’s a good place to be when you have to pick between things that you love –
I’m simply trading an old dream for a new one.

As for
the revelations part of this - I said at the beginning of the year that I was setting
out on a truth-seeking journey, externally and internally, called the Physics
of the Quest – and I have. If you are truly willing to regard everything that
happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet
along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and
forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not
be withheld from you – and it has not.

This
“truth” is perhaps a revelation of apocalyptic proportions in the small
picture, but I can’t help but feel a sense of liberation because the big
picture has such unprecedented potential. I have the best job in the universe
with the most incredible people I could ever imagine working with and simply
could not have asked for a better introduction into a field I think it’s now
safe to call a new career path. This is not a door closed – it is a door opened,
and I am beyond thrilled by the endless opportunities at every turn. The only
things worth regretting in life are the chances you didn’t take – this isn’t
going to be one that falls through the cracks. I fully believe in seizing
opportunities when they present themselves – I have found a passion that I
never saw coming and I intend to dive into pursuing it headfirst. If you always
do what you’ve always done, you will always get what you’ve always gotten. On
this Independence Day I am exercising the freedom I have to change my mind. Carpe
Diem.