Date: Fri, 21 May 2004 04:11:35 -0400 (EDT)
From: Dontae
Subject: Falling For Straight Boys
I was in my fourth quarter in school, and everything was going considerably
ok, I had been through a couple sets of friends, had recently come out of
the closet to my mother and family and I had a very "fuck the world"
attitude. My name is Drew and I go to school in Ft. Lauderdale, one of the
gay capitals of our great country LOL. I had no intention of ever falling
for a straight guy, although you could say that it is the story of my
life. Even when I realized that I was gay in my senior year of high school,
I had used my easiest outlet to explore my new sexuality, closeted as it
was, and there was no better outlet than that of the coveted and
controversial boy scouts. I used those exploratory hormonal camp outs' to
"prey" on the needs of my fellow troop members. Yep, I gave good head. I
remember a couple people in particular. There was Rusty, Noah, and Jeff.
Rusty was my best friend in high school's boyfriend (HER name was
Brooke). He used to sport a very ugly bowl cut that I in my cosmetologist
stage rid him of and transformed him into a total hottie! Noah was my type
all the way he was taller, younger, hotter, and a soccer player. So we had
common interests. Yep we both loved balls! Soccer balls that is. LOL. Yeah
I never had a passion for any other sports other that gymnastics and
soccer.
Now Jeff wasn't hot by any means, he was cute but a little on the pudgy
side, but boy did he have a huge dick! He hit puberty way before I did, I'd
still like to think that at 19 I'm still going through puberty, my voice
hasn't lowered yet and my balls aren't big as most peoples but all around
I'm not a very big guy to begin with. I'm actually on the scrawny side. In
Junior high I was a nerd I guess but I always had friends and I was very
popular with the popular crowd labeled as "the smart kid." I grew into my
looks in High School However, I didn't get any bigger I'm about 83lbs wet
with my shoes on and full of water. Yep I'm really skinny, I'm not very
tall however only about 5'3" or 5'4" so I'm not lanky, No I'm just cute
little Drew.
And I am cute, I realized that one day as I was staring at myself in the
mirror, I have very pretty dark brown eyes perfectly arched eyebrows with a
very cute scar in the right one, (just like Holly Marie Combs) and a
beautiful complexion. In a way I guess I'm glad that I've gone through
puberty later than most because I've never really had a battle with acne, I
have a very Afro-centric little button nose and perfectly full lips, much
smaller that those of my older and younger brothers. I have to say that I
have very feminine facial features, I guess that comes from sharing a womb
with my twin sister Nevaeh, which is heaven spelled back wards, god rest
her soul. She died before we were born, and I was the twin that survived.
She never got a name, so I named her and Nevaeh seemed perfect because I
always said that I'd see her in heaven someday.
But anyway back to my story, your reading this because you want to read
about sex, so let's get to it. Anyway, I have a perfect complexion and I'm
about two or three shades lighter than my brothers which is good cause they
are really dark. I'm in no way light-skinned but I'm much lighter than
them. Anyway I have extremely curly black hair, that I recently cut very
short and no facial hair whatsoever, I'm a mix between a really cute little
boy and a pretty young lady. But I have a bad ass attitude.
I guess that it is my strongest point as well as my weakest, it is the
reason why I'm so popular now in college, because I don't give a fuck! But
it does keep me from seeming approachable which is why I guess until you
get to know me a lot of people don't approach me, I guess it's also the
reason why a lot of people don't think or know that I'm gay until I tell
them. I don't know why, I don't act straight. Now don't get me wrong, I'm
in no way Queenie but I'm not the most masculine man that you'll meet by a
long shot. Anyway, I've met a lot of people here, a lot of them gay a lot
of them"straight" Which is what I will be talking about today. I've had a
lot of sex since I became sexually active, to the number of 40 different
people, in the past 3 years. Since I came to college I have received a
label from some of my gay friends as easy, I don't agree, I simply think
that I have a healthy sexual appetite, and I'm hungry, really hungry, a
lot! Lot's of people ask me how I do it like my friend Darrell he calls me
legendary. Like I told you I'm cute, and I'm subtle, I wait for my opening
and then I take it which ever way that it comes. That's what I did in my
most recent escapade which is the reason for this story.
A couple of months ago in my transition from one group of friends to
another I met a guy, Let's just call him Dorian, Dorian Burns. Now Dorian,
is cute, he is about 6' curly brown hair, and brown eyes and a perfect
nose. He also has very small kissable lips. Very Kissable but we'll get to
that. Anyway, I never thought that Dorian was really my type, oh who am I
kidding, the ruggedly handsome, AF model is everyone's type. I guess I
could say that while he was cute, I never found myself attracted to him. At
least I think that's what I told myself to avoid making it awkward between
us. After all how attractive is someone that bonds with you over "The
Exorcist". So the month went on and Dorian pissed off my group of
friends. Naturally, I comforted the one that he hurt, she later turned out
to be a drama junkie, yeah a real soul sucking spider! and I understood
perfectly why he would act the way he did. Over the next couple of weeks
Dorian and I started to hang out a lot more. I realized that he was very
funny in his own way and he was also very flirtatious, to wards me! The
question of Dorian's sexuality has always been a sensitive subject for the
entire dormitory in which we lived. He said that he was attracted to girls,
that he loved girls, and things like he wanted a wife and kids, and all
that great stuff. But he had been rumored to sleep with guys, not just any
guys but one of my very cute openly gay, friends! Not to mention that his
gestures and actions not to mention voice suggested that he was not hetero
in the slightest, and he has more facial products than me! Now that's
strange. So in my mind I just marked down that he had bi sexual
tendencies. Until I got to know him better.
I soon learned that Dorian can drink like a fish and he likes to drink, a
lot! He's the type that does strange things and forgets in the morning when
he's drunk. But he also really speaks how he feels when he's drunk. I've
learned a lot about how and what he thinks about himself when he was
drunk. We have had many important conversations when we were both rather
buzzed. We've talked about who he likes, who he wants to fuck, how he
fucked up his little brothers life, everything. Over the past couple of
weeks I had try as I might become attracted to my new best friend. I kept
telling myself that it wasn't true, I was in a loving committed
relationship of 4-1/2 years, this couldn't be happening not now! But it
was. Dorian knew from the day that I met him that I was gay and that I was
proud to be gay. I was in no way in the closet. Yet he had become
increasingly comfortable with his display of sexual whatever the fuck it
was. Pulling me into the bathroom with him to "discuss" situations with
people in the next room when we were drunk and non relentlessly pulling out
his dick to take a piss, with this look in his eyes, like he was wondering
if I was going to look, like he was expecting me to look, like he wanted me
to look. Needless to say I looked, not so much as an obvious gander, but as
I was cooking and it was my room and I was in there first. So I casually
glanced up and took a look over the top of my glasses and looked at the
reflection in the mirror, only for a second but I looked. All I could tell
was that he had a decent sized head. and that it was a lovely shade of
pink. Other things like long lingering eye locks and playful flirtatious
fighting that I never took seriously. Sure I took care of him when he was
sick, he would have done the same for me. Sure we had kissed each other
good night before, but that just meant that he was comfortable with his
sexuality, whatever the fuck it was. I had discussed many times before with
our other best friend Rizzo an openly gay lesbian at the tender age of 17
that I didn't have feelings for Dorian and that was because he wasn't at a
place in his life mentally where I could be with him physically, or some
bullshit like that. Anything to get the feelings out of my head, and
apparently my heart as well. I found myself wondering about him a lot when
I was alone, a lot of the time the thoughts weren't sexual, they were just
thoughts about what he was thinking about, thoughts about why he was so
confused, silent prayers to myself and to the supposed god that existed out
there, that was going to condemn me to hell, that he would find the answers
that he was looking for and that he would find who and what he wanted in
the end. One day I wondered if that was me for like three seconds and
instantly I smacked myself in the head and was like NO you dumb ass! I knew
Dorian, I knew what he had done, and what he does, and who he is, I know
his personality inside and out. I know that what he wants in the end or so
he says is a girl, and at 21 yrs old, he needed to start looking for a good
one now. I knew all of this, so why did I have these feelings? Why did I
get jealous or upset whenever he flirted with girls or had other guys
around? Why did I get pissed when the two of us drinking turned into 6
straight guys talking about pussy and ass and well me drinking? Why was I
not thinking of my boyfriend, a model, who was being faithful to me in New
York? Why? Why? Why? WHY?! There were so many questions and apparently not
enough answers. I wanted to rip my hair out! I tried all of my creative
outlets. I tried drawing, I wrote a poem, I described in excruciating
detail to my journal all the goings on, so why couldn't I get him out of my
head. Was there something that I wanted from him? Yes that explains it
perfectly! I wanted something, I wanted him, in someway only once I wanted
him! Why else was it that try as I might I couldn't go a day without seeing
him? Why was I in his room everyday, just waiting for the moments when he
would shut the door and we would be alone, even for just a moment until
someone came knocking on the door asking for him? Because I wanted him, I
wanted Dorian Burns and the feelings that I had weren't going to go away
until I had him.
I got my chance to have him on one of our drinking nights. As usual I had
thought that it was going to just be him and me drinking that night. Well I
was stupid for that. As soon as he walked out the door to smoke a
cigarette, one of the boys approached him. The next thing I knew there were
3 other people and Rizzo in the room on our drinking night. Perfect. Just
what I needed. To add to my misery his newest whore was there bitching and
quite frankly pissing both of us off with her incessant whining! She kept
saying that she was going to leave. So I told her to leave and she got
mad. She said
"you just want me to leave because I'm bitching"
It told her she was right and she got even madder. I told her
"at least you had something to bitch about,"
She kept saying over and over "why is it that when I find a good guy that
is perfect for me he has to be fucking' gay?"
Whoa! She made that decision/revelation all on her own. With absolutely no
help from me or Rizzo. After all Rizzo and I are his best friends and he
neither, denies or confirms anything with us pertaining to his sexuality,
he's just...Dorian!
The night grew old and everyone began to say their goodbyes, the whore left
and Dorian and I talked about her serious bugging over a cigarette. It was
just Me Dorian and Rizzo now. I had managed to maintain my buzz, which is a
hard task, when there is a bunch of loud people in a small dorm room,
drinking alcohol on school grounds knowing it's not allowed. I downed a
couple of "wounded soldiers" (beers that got started but not finished) and
got ready to lay down, there was no way that I was going to make it all the
way back to my dorm room in the other building this drunk. Rizzo finished
surfing the web and asked if I was going to sleep here or in her room. I
told her I was sleeping here. Oh did I mention that Dorian had passed out
while we were smoking a cigarette outside? Rizzo and I had poured him into
his bed about an hour ago and he was still out. It was then that I thanked
my creator for allowing me to be so small. I squeezed perfectly between him
and the wall and fell asleep.
During my brief sleep I managed to drape my arm over Dorian's
waist. Apparently out of sheer instinct, I guess. I was jolted back to
reality when I realized where my hand was. I had my hand in Dorian's boxers
and I was very slowly but very greedily jerking him off. He was still small
but girthy, and he was drunk after all. I wasn't expecting him to perform
that well. But I was still drunk, I was curious, that glance in the
bathroom was no longer enough, for me I had already come this far so I took
a peek.
It was so cute! Yeah you heard me cute. Most people would be disappointed,
but what I was looking at was the cutest little semi-hard, 2-3/4 inch cock. I
saw the lovely pink head that had teased my dreams for weeks in all it's
glory. Oddly enough Dorian didn't seem to recognize that anything had
happened, or was still happening. It was right then that I got greedy. I
had to have it, I slowly bent my head down and licked the tip, and tongued
the underside, still no reaction from headquarters, but all systems were
go! I greedily devoured the small but fat cock and began to bring it to
life. I sucked it deep into my throat and swirled my tongue all around. I
quickly realized that because I was drunk, I was out of focus and I was
neglecting to cover my teeth. I quickly fixed the problem and began to
bob. I had wanted this for so long and now I had it. My prize, my reward
for being a good little patient boy. I then expelled him from my mouth and
began to lick his balls. By now my own 7x6 cock was raging and begging to
be free from my custom made soccer ball pajamas. But in no way did I want
to ruin this moment by freeing my cock and suddenly having Dorian awake, no
this was about me pleasing him and him alone. So I sucked and I sucked and
I sucked Just waiting for my prize. But sucking alone wasn't getting me
anywhere, so I began to jerk him off, fast and furiously. He let out a
subconscious "yeah" and began to twitch. I knew I was getting close to my
prize. His twitches became violent, he had to be awake by now, I looked up,
nope still knocked out. His cock really did have a mind of it's own, then
in one violent jerk, my face, the comforter, the sheets became soaked with
the seeds of his manhood. I wanted desperately to lap up every drop that I
could find but decided not to, considering that he was fucking the town
whore right now. I hated her more than words could explain, right then and
there. I simply basked in the afterglow and my own pre-cum had begun to
leak down my leg, so I went to the bathroom. I cleaned my face and brushed
my teeth, (yeah I had a toothbrush there) hey he had one in my room
too. Then I went to the toilet and removed my rampant cock, it's true what
they say about big things and small packages) or so I've been told. Anyway,
I removed my own rampant cock and with one stroke I silently sent my seed
bursting into the toilet. After I was done, I washed up, yeah I had
toiletries there, we are really good friends. After I washed I put on a
pair of pajamas, (yes they were mine) one of his t-shirts and a pair of
socks and climbed into bed. It was my turn to pass out.
I was only asleep a few minutes when I felt him stir, and head for the
shower, I cracked my eye and took a peek to see him walk away, he probably
thought that it was a wet dream. As he got a change of clothes for the
shower he noticed my pajamas in the hamper. He peered at me through the
darkness. They still had his spunk all over them, plus they smelled like
beer, he figured someone had spilled some on me, and he had got me wet when
he had his dream. He tossed them back in the hamper and headed off to the
shower. I basked in the glow of being warm and clean and snuggled under his
new Nautica comforter, (I switched the one that he had cum all over.) I
fell asleep, after he finished his shower and sobered up he came back to
bed and spooned with me, that didn't last long as we are both wild
sleepers.
I slept all day the next day and, he apparently was none the wiser. Rizzo
came by and we chilled all day. It has been two days since the incident and
all is going well, there is apparently no awkwardness, and we are all still
really good friends. I don't think that I'll tell anyone about this, just
like I've never told anyone about Sam Mears, or Noah or Rustin or Jeff. No,
this is just one of those stories that I'll add to my book. The one about
falling for straight boys.