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And she finds him guilty of concealing the facts of his boyhood even from her now widowed mother, then his innocent young bride. By the end, the triumphant detective daughter has found out more about him than her mother ever knew. She knows more than he ever knew: the identity of his natural parents. She knows that his name was not really Reg; it wasn't Greer, either. Of her childhood dad- dy-an advertising-space salesman for a Melbourne newspaper, with a teasing manner, fancy suits, and a nicotine- stained mustache-all she is left with is "a heap of props, smart clothes, false teeth, and a script full of lying cliches." But the gaps and distortions of his history are only part of a more serious crime: he didn't love her enough. She wonders whether he real- ly loved her at all. She remembers how every time she tried to put her arms around his neck he would unlock them and push her away. "You're big enough and ugly enough to take care of yourself" was a line he used all the time. A Cheshire cat to her Alice, he had a way of vanishing even when he was in the room. The sedatives on which he depended could not have helped. He would sit hiding behind his newspaper while Germaine's mother walloped her for some insignificant offense. "That my father never once struck or reviled me was reason enough for me to love him," she says, like some Dickensian urchin resigning herself to emotional crumbs. But that restraint was not enough to prove that he loved her. She can't remember his giving her a word of encouragement. To her knowledge, he never read the books she went on to write, or watched her on television. This is a fast-moving, sometimes wildly emotional book wrapped around a cold, still place. It shows the members of a perfectly ordinary, attractive sub- urban family shut off from each other by secrets, anger, and inherited shame. It shows how stinginess with love- what E. M. Forster once called "the undeveloped heart" -corrodes both the miser and the one deprived. Ms. Greer is fighting hard to smash out of all this. She is a sort of spiritual work in progress, on the bumpy path of coming to terms. She can no longer be a victim; she writes partly to take re- 117 M@bil Travel Guide THE ONLY MOBIL 5-STAR RESORT BETWEEN SAN FRANCISCO & LOS ANGELES Elegant country atmosphere minutes from town Fine dining in our Covey restaurant Golf and tenOis. Member Preferred Hotels Wnte or call Val Bishop for color brochure, 8205 Valley Greens Dr , Carmel, CA 93923. (408) 624-1581. For reservations in Ca (800) 682-9303 Other states (800) 538-9516. ,'"' QUAI L LODGE CARMEL CALIFORNIA MORE LITERATE J:.SHIRTS! -\ Poe Shakespeare, Sherlock Holmes, Bach, Billie Holiday, Van Gogh, Gandhi, Kafka, Dostoevsky, K Marx, Jung, Mozart, Che Guevara, Nietzsche, Cheshire Cat, · Mark Twam, Thoreau, Darwin, J F.K , Da VincI, Wilde, Rlmbaud, Beethoven, James Joyce, ConfucIus, Kerouac, Jane Austen. Sartre Dickens others Sizes: S, M, L, XL. 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