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Running

I had to take a little break from writing posts, because I really didn’t have that much to write about. I haven’t smashed any personal records, I haven’t had any grand breakthroughs. What I have been doing is taking care of myself, looking at the situations and people which weren’t having such a healthy influence on my mood and life, and then looking at how I can work on surrounding myself with less negative, more positive. So while that doesn’t look very productive on the outside, it was really important for me.

While I was having this Mini Re-evaluation Of Everything Ever, I found some really useful ways that help me.

One of them was starting a journal. In this journal, I’m only allowed to engage in positive self-talk. I am not allowed to put myself down. And every day, in this journal, I must write down 5 ways that I made that day count. There’s a couple of reasons that I think everyone should do this:

It’s a really good way of showing yourself that even when you feel like you had a terrible day, that day was not wasted. Maybe you learned from a mistake? Maybe it just made you appreciate good days better?

It shows you that there are so many little things that you have to be thankful. Sure, some days are going to count because you have done something unbelievably productive, like cleaned your entire house. Others will count because you reached a goal or a milestone. Some days will count because you just had the most important or meaningful day of your life. But some will just count because you met up with a friend for coffee, or watched a good film, or read a good book, or were on time for work or college. The small things count, and they add up to most of your life.

It shows you that getting work done is not the only thing that counts. Enjoying yourself, taking care of yourself is important too.

While continuing on this Mini Re-evaluation Of Everything Ever, I realised that a lot of situations in my daily life make me feel overwhelmed, stressed, or can even be massive anxiety triggers. So I made another list. It’s a list for when I recognise that I’m starting to feel overwhelmed, that I’m getting that tight feeling in my chest again, that I need to find a way to separate myself from that situation before this overwhelmed feeling becomes a problem. This list is full of things that I can do to make myself feel better, to unwind, to distance myself from an unhealthy situation, or even just to take a break. It’s full of things like:

Drink a cup of green tea, coffee, hot chocolate.

Pay attention to your breathing.

Listen to some music.

Read a book.

Go for a run.

Walk the dog

Watch some videos on youtube.

I’m really working on paying attention to how I’m feeling, to how I react in situations, to how I’m dealing. It’s so important, so vital, and it’s past time I started taking care of myself.

On day 211, I’d love to wake up early, and go for a run in my favourite place, a trail that runs along the coast, half an hour from my house. The trail runs along cliffs, through tunnel walkways of climbing plants, down hills, along an old wall built from cement mixed with mussel shells and down to to a cove, with sea stacks and caves. It runs up hills, over a steam, past light houses… It’s the most beautiful place I have ever seen. Even just thinking of this place calms me down when I’m anxious.

It’s my happy place.

I don’t know why I don’t visit there more often. Maybe it’s the travel, maybe it’s that when I have the time, I spend it doing other things, maybe it’s the weather, maybe I’ve just become too invested in the mundane things that fill my time…

I don’t know why this prompt was chosen to be about day 211, but I also don’t know why I would wait for that day before I do want I want to do. Don’t save things for a special occasion. Every day of your life is a specially occasion. Wake up with excitement, wonder what the day has in store for you. Make every day memorable. Give everyday the best you have.

Today, after college, I got on a treadmill and kicked ass. This was despite walking to my bus stop, and nearly getting the first bus home because I felt like I didn’t have the energy for a run. At the last minute, I turned around and decided I did. I was right.

I ran 10km in under an hour for the first time, and was 3 minutes and 13 seconds faster than my previous personal best. I’m still 14 minutes and 47 seconds off my goal time, but today, I made a lot of progress. I am closer to reaching my goals now than when I got out of bed this morning. So it was a good day.

I realised thatmost of the things that limit me and hold me back are in my head. I am capable of a lot more than I give myself credit for. I definitely need to work on having a more self-positive mindset. I need to believe I can do things, reach goals, and if I put in the work, I will. I need to stop being so discouraged with myself.

Every time I run, I try to remind myself that 8 months ago, I could only run 1 kilometre, and my legs hurt for a day after that attempt. So when I feel like giving up, I think of where I can be in 3 months, or 6 months, or a year if I don’t. The future is exciting.