Janitor On Duty

January 23rd, 2008

10:34 PM

Eloisa James, I hate you

Not really, but I tell you, that woman is evil. I have to sit down and really think about how I am going to put down in words my thoughts about An Affair Before Christmas because that book makes me demented. You know, if dear Leopold is real, I'd marry him in a heartbeat. But why oh why is this author making poor Leopold into the third leg in all the relationships he has his heart invested in? First Jemma, and now Charlotte! Can't the poor darling catch a break?

Anyone who lives near Eloisa James, can you do me a favor? Please sneak into her house, tie her to a chair, and play something dreadful at the highest volume (Sanjaya Malakar's Greatest Hits will always work) until she breaks down and reveals what she's going to do to my poor Leopold. I can't take the suspense. I'm such a sucker for this author's manipulations that I am actually terrified that she may just kill off Leopold by the end of the book since she is setting up the man to be some kind of martyr to love.

Okay, so Jemma is pretty certainly going to go back to Elijah, who is actually kinda tolerable here. Sigh, I wish the author will actually give her, Elijah, and Leopold a threesome thing because this is one time I would love to see all three find some kind of life together with each other. Come on, with Leopold constantly sighing in melancholy over Elijah and Benjamin, you know he isn't above swinging both ways with Elijah and Jemma.

But... so, who will Charlotte end up with? That silly creature who showed up out of nowhere to steal her from my darling Leopold? I need to know. I don't think I can wait for months until the next book comes out. I'm going to get an ulcer soon if I don't get any answers, so you folks have better help me get these answers soon.

Signed, the President of the Leopold Love Charter.

PS: It's still hard to believe all this while that, considering the way I cringed at the author's first few books, she's now on her way to being my "Judith Ivory" kind of author, if you know what I mean, while Judith Ivory is off... somewhere, doing something.

I'm absolutely with you. Elijah seems like he's removed the stick from his ass (or at least wiggled it around and had some fun) but he still doesn't stack up. At one point I was afraid she was actually gonna kill Leopold in *this* book and I actually sniffled! (That's big, I cry at about one book a year.)