2014 Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Black Series First Test

Black Magic

Click. Click. SMACK. Click-click. Leaving my parking spot is a noisy event. I'm on the bank of a favorite country road, and I'm wondering what's wrong with this king of land-bound rockets, the $296,000 2014 Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG Black Series. It's as if kernels of corn are popping inside each wheel surround. What gives?

This is an SLS like no other. It looks, acts, sounds, and yes, even smells like something concocted specifically to haul ass down the Mulsanne Straight. The cabin wears nothing but black and red Alcantara and leather and has just enough civilian amenities (airbags, three-point belts, a stereo) for it to appease DOT lawyers.The Black Series' Michelin Pilot Sport Cup 2 footwear (the SLS is the first to wear these tires) is sized -- wait for it -- a gargantuan 275/35R-19 front, 325/30R-20 rear (the SLS GT has 265-/295-mm front/rear widths). They're rare, pricey, and advanced rolling donuts that have a slight gravitational effect on passing pavement. Each covers featherweight forged aluminum matte black wheels (19x10-in front, 20x12-in rear) set inside the impressively large arches.By the time I strap into the series-specific Designo leather bucket, the Michelins' secret compound is already warm and ready -- minutes prior, my intrepid lead-footed colleagues wore them in with hard miles and a lot of heat. Any unstuck pebble or uprooted blade of grass on this clean, desolate, near-Autobahn-grade byway can't escape the gooey momentary grasp of these French tires.This model, more so than the four Black Series variants that preceded it (SLK, CLK, SL, C), is a near mirror image of a winning racecar: the SLS AMG GT3, a gull-winged monster that clinched last year's 24 Hours of Dubai endurance race and multiple FIA GT3 class wins. Like that GT3's, the Black Series' body is buffer (0.5 inch wider front, 1.0 inch rear) with extended front and rear tracks (up 0.8 and 0.9 inch, respectively). The fixed carbon-fiber wing atop aluminum perches negates lift at the rear axle with nose canards made of the same composite performing a similar function up front. Both are included in the optional AMG Aerodynamics Package. A Black Series-specific CFRP (carbon-fiber reinforced plastic) front splitter, chiseled side sills, and carved-out rear diffuser optimize airflow around the car. These accents also force feed ambient air into all the ever-important cooling systems. The blacked-out headlamps and a CFRP vented hood round off the intense physique.The model-specific, 96 percent aluminum spaceframe mounts suspension with front and rear bushing compliances that are 50 percent and 42 percent stiffer, respectively. The SLS GT's independent double-wishbone architecture remains, with new, stiffer, two-mode-only (Sport and Sport+) AMG Adaptive Performance Suspension dampers. Coilover springs allow for the calibration of individual wheel loads if an owner is keen on shaving seconds off his/her lap times. Revised front wheel mounts and a retuned stabilizer bar are in place for surer balance. The engine bay is stiffened by an updated brace that employs a gas strut to counteract inevitable G-force loads.The list goes on. A carbon-fiber torque tube, lithium-ion starter battery, and titanium exhaust trim pounds and additional underbody bracing reduces chassis flex. Unearthly 15.8/14.2-inch front/rear carbon-ceramic brakes annihilate momentum produced by the 94-pound-lighter Black Series.Then there's the hand-built 6.2-liter engine with new oil and water cooling systems, revised crankshaft components, updated intake setup, and new ECU mapping to accommodate for a higher 8000 rpm redline. Steering calibration, the many electronic nannies' programming (three-mode ESP; Race Start), the seven-speed dual-clutch gearbox's shift times -- all of their performance thresholds are up considerably.During a recent track test, a full launch control sprint to 60 mph took just 3.2 seconds, a half-second quicker than the SLS GT. It's also more than a half-second quicker down the quarter mile and 5.3 mph faster (11.1 seconds at 129.8 mph). It demolished our figure eight in 23.1 seconds at an average 0.97 g (the GT does it in 23.9 seconds at 0.87 g), and it stuck with nearly a tenth more g-force (1.11 g versus the GT's 1.04 g). Braking from 60 mph takes just 100 feet.That's data that'll make rivals McLaren and Ferrari sweat. The Benz beats both the MP4-12C and 458 Italia on the skidpad (both 1.06 g), in the figure eight (McLaren: 23.2 seconds at 0.91 g; Ferrari: 23.5 seconds at 0.90 g), and in full ABS stops from 60 mph (both 106 feet). It's so much fun on our figure eight that quite a few staffers jumped at the chance to lap it.My turn is today. The first batch of esses arrives at the SLS' massive nose faster than expected. The long front clip, together with the confining cocoon of a cockpit, has me double-checking apexes and recalculating driving lines. A nicely weighted tug comes at the slightest rotation of the communicative helm. Stabbing the left pedal catapults me hard into the belts as I dip the 12 o'clock strip a few more degrees. The SLS stays superbly solid. The chassis reacts without drama, no matter the severity of my command. It hunkers and holds, while the aft end grips with commensurate fervency. (Getting a tail-wagging SLS GT to do the same would require a lot more braking, less speed, and a very judicial dose of throttle).The cunning application of all 468 lb-ft of torque further shortens -- and enhances -- my encounters with the corners. Granted, the car's cutting-edge electronics and a new electronically activated rear differential lock deserve most of the praise. The latter aides in the reduction of yaw, and right about now, as these left-right-on-power-off-power transitions test the reflexes of both vehicle and driver, the orchestration of all systems is buttery smooth, traction is maintained, and the SLS composedly wreaks havoc on this path at stupid speeds.Pulling the starboard paddle produces a glorious roar from the titanium pipes. It's as if at every subsequent cog, every faster revolution of the crankshaft, a pack of lions is awakened from their post-slaughter slumber by trolling tourists. It's enticing, enthralling, and if you're not ready for it, a little shocking. Long live angry kitties.Roars turn into short, rev-matched barks as downshifts curb momentum, and although the dual-clutch transaxle is intuitive, not every downshift comes when commanded. The electronics aren't all that trusting of their human captain. Upshifts, too, have a 500 rpm buffer between paddle flap and gear engagement, which is frustrating at 10/10ths driving effort.I notice a little yellow sliding car icon flashing below my line of sight as I navigate a new chicane. Bouts of all-out tail wagging could easily be incited were it not for that icon and the programmed brains behind it. Amazingly, five miles into my run, it's the first time it's come on.The Benz is a double-take-rousing, neck-breakingly special machine that'll shrivel adrenal glands, make ears yearn for that distinct titanium-accented elocution, and have egos balloon to Goodyear blimp proportions. I emerge feeling like Lewis Hamilton after an easy win in Monaco. The sweat on my brow comes from the experience of pure, almost carnal bliss, not hard work, like I'd have in a Viper or 'Vette. If my soul had the ability, it'd be smiling like my ugly face.Hands-down, this is the most athletic, road-going two-door that has ever worn the 125 year-old three-pointed star

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