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There’s something stuck up in the chimneyAnd I don’t know what it is,But it’s been there all night long.Well, I waited up for Santa all Christmas nightBut he never came and it don’t seem right.And there’s something in the chimneyAnd it doesn’t make a sound,But I wish you Merry Christmas.

There’s something stuck up in the chimneyAnd I don’t know what it is,But it’s been there all week long.Well, the dog keeps barking up the chimney flueAnd we don’t know what we’re going to do.Cause there’s something in the chimneyAnd it doesn’t move around,And it’s been a week since Christmas.

There’s something stuck up in the chimneyAnd I don’t know what it is,But it’s been there all month long.Well, it’s jammed up tight above the fireplaceNow the house smells funny, such a big disgrace.That there’s something in the chimneyAnd it doesn’t talk at all,And it’s been there since last Christmas.

There’s something stuck up in the chimneyAnd I don’t know what it is,But it’s been there all year long.I’ll been waiting up for Santa like I did last yearBut my brother says, “He’s already here.”And he’s stuck up in the chimneyAnd he doesn’t say a wordAnd he’ll be there every Christmas.And we’ll have him every Christmas.

Santa just spread that rumor so they would put stockings out. He never had to go down any chimney. Teleportation is how he does it just as he can be in a millions homes simultaneously. Time-slip and all that.

About The Other Coast

"The Other Coast" was launched by Creators Syndicate in 2001 and, besides satirizing life in the 21st century, prominently features environmental and animal rights issues, something Raeside feels passionate about.