This past weekend marks the third year of Philidelphia's VGXPO, a Poor man's E3, which is understandable since Philidelphia is a poor man's LA.
I had never heard of this expo prior to finding an ad for it on the ground.

Let me share my tale with you.

10 am: I am boarding the train from camden to philidelphia, I take my seat and I find a newpaper. I picked it up because I saw that "Broken Social Scene" was playing in the city, so I attempted to flip to that page, but I ended up flipping to the "Transexual personal ads". I knew something was up. I looked around and noticed people staring, THEN I saw an ad for "hairspray" and thought to myself

"Oh Dear God"

Turns out I was reading "Gay Pulse" Philly's number one gay newspaper (I know this because it told me so). Now I couldn't simply put it down, for fear that someone would see what I had been reading and hit me with a "EWWW NIGGA YOU GAY!" and I couldn't keep reading for fear that someone would be see what I was reading and hit me with a "EWWW NIGGA YOU GAY". SO I put it in the guy next to me's bag. He was homeless, so It was like I was giving him a house, which no man can deny the gift of a house. so off I went to the expo.

11:30: the doors open up and me and 2 other dudes walk in. I get my ID badge, and I shuffle over to the Computers set up running CRYSIS and sepnd about an hour cutting down trees with a machine gun. really it should just be called "lumberjack", because that is the only think fun about it. Then I spy an arcade cabinet running Ikaruga out of my perif and waltz on over to that machine.

12:30:
SWAG CHECK IN:
Got an Alienware shirt, and ECA shirt, a Panasonic bag and shirt, a DEATHNOTE shirt
some faggot from a gaming blog of some sort (I'm guessing Screwattack) is filming things and is attempting to be funny. He asked me if DDR was hard. I lol'd because he said hard and then walked away from this strange homosexual. Competed in a Team fortress tourney, Won a 100 dollar LOGITECH mouse and a ALIENWARE game comtroller.

1:30: at the cosplay area. Fat chicks dressed as Sora etc. etc. the usual. went over to the guitar HEro 3 booth and participate in a tournament. LOST HORRIBLY. I began to think then and there how badass it would be to offer the original "power rangers" theme song as a downloadable song.
Saw faggot from game site again. Still don't know what site he's from. probably will never know.

3:00 almost ready to leave. On my way out I happen to see a BIG ASS TRAILER that has rockband written on it. Playable Rockband inside. I begin to wonder how I missed this big ass trailer. So I go inside and paly it.
I do not like Rockband very much.
The Guitar, is just like Guitar HEro, just not as good, the singing is jsut like Kareoke Revolution, just not as good, and the drums... well the drums are boring. Oh well, it'll still sell millions.

Yes. If you've seen it on youtube , go you, But Dfear, the maker of the first lazer collection, Has recently released the second one in an attempt to milk the "Im Firin mah lazar" of every peice of funny it contains before it becomes laym. It's actually pretty well animated, and* quite funny

Check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/v/ZQLKEZzBIZE
Edit: If one of you can teach me how not to fail and show me how to embed the YuuTewbs, that would be awesome. read

Apparently, there was some kinda popular animation a while back called "The Ultimate showdown" that was about an ultimate fight between every hero ever. This was all fine and good until the guys who made it started putting out shirts with the lyrics on it. Now, here in america, we have a little something called "LOLLAWSUIT" where you sue everybody for everything. allways. Because these shirts have these characters names on them, they are infringing on copyright laws. can you say, "Ultimate law suit"

I'm just posting this to gloat that I just found all three scenarios of Shining Force 3 for the Sega Saturn at a flea Market for 5 dollars. I bought that som' bitch so fast, you wouldn't even habeeb it.

If you saw my last blog, I've been preparing these things a little sloppily.
But, I'm gonna try and fix that as time goes on.

Every once in a while, a game comes along that everyone who plays it loves.
A game thats funny, involving, fun to play... and I flippin' hate.

Case and point,
"Phonix Wright Ace Attourney: Trials and Tribulations" for the nintendo DS. After a tip from one of my close friends to import this game, I did. I said to myself, "What the hell, I have an extra 30 bucks to blow"

Little did I know that I COULD have spent that thirty bucks on a hooker and getting the clap from said hooker. That actually would have been a SMARTER way to spent said 30 dollars, then to buy this game.

Anyways to the actual game. The text drags on FOREVER with useless shit, and when you finally get to do something you are either

A. Asleep.
B. Turning off the game.
C. Turning off the game while asleep.

Then through some mericle that you are awake when the time finally comes to make a choice
BAM
WALL OF TEXT

It's like, If I wanted to read a book, I'd read a book! It's not fun, nor are the storys that interesting. It's like "Law and Order" for the mentally impaired. Now have you ever met a girl that you really like, but there is just one thing about her that just irks you? Like the way she sneezzes is a little annoying? Well this game is like a girl that you totally hate with a burning passion, who just walks around and is made up of NOTHING but that little things that annoy you.

For instance, every time the character "Maya" talks, I honestly want to shut off the game. everything she says is annoying and not funny at all. Not to mention that every other sentance she "speaks" you hear this annoying little ping.

Also, In EVERY CASE you know there is going to be some flamboyant ass guy who you just want to beat with a rake, but what I dread msot off all, is when those flamboyant guys talk. THEY ALWAYS MAKE THIS ANNOYING SMACKING SOUND WHEN THEY MOVE. And I know what you're thinking, "Just shut off your volume" but that is the only thing that is redeemable about this game. It gives this game just a tiny but of the drama and interesting...ness (umm...wut?) it so desperatly needs.

Seriously. Don't buy this game. Or Any Phoneix Wright's for that matter.
2/10 read