It never fails… Just when I think things are calming down, and I’m getting into a routine, something comes along to prove me wrong. I get that becoming comfortable often means becoming complacent. But seriously? Being the planner control freak that I am, I like to know what’s going on, when it’s happening, and what my role is to the letter. Unfortunately, life likes to throw 90 mile an hour curveballs at me on what feels like a daily basis.

I have several big HUGE unknowns in my life right now. I also have several “knowns” that are just out of my control at the moment and are driving me BONKERS! Just when I think I’m going to be able to tackle one of them, something else pops up and smacks me in the face and says, uh uh uh…

To top all of it off, I’m sick, again. I have a horrible flu like cold thing going on and I’m achy, congested and have a massive headache… Fun times!

This week I’m trying to focus all of my energy and control freakish-ness on making good choices, staying positive, and drinking LOTS of water. 🙂

Obviously preparing fresh, sensible meals is the best way to monitor not only your waistline, but also the foods, chemicals, etc that you are putting into your body. But let’s get real… some days you just need the easy alternative. With work, family, friends, and working out all vying for our time, sometimes cooking falls by the wayside.

I have to admit, when it comes to week day lunches I prefer to microwave a frozen meal rather than having to come up with yet another meal solution. Since joining Weight Watchers I’ve been trying to find tasty meal options that don’t blow my points plus budget. WW has a ton of frozen meals, desserts, snacks, etc etc etc. It’s super easy to start stocking up on their products, especially because they list the points plus value right on the packaging! No math involved. 🙂

Yesterday I tried their meal in a bag, Cheesy Chicken and Brocolli. It was a nice sized portion and was 9 p+. The cheesy sauce melted nicely, and at first smell and look it seemed like it would be a yummy and filling meal. Unfortunately, this was not the case. I was truly disappointed in the meal! It had a grainy texture, and almost no flavor. I left the lunch room still a little hungry and certain I could have made a delicious chicken & brocolli with brown rice that tasted amazing for either the same amount of p+ or less… I’m hoping that one of the three other options in my freezer will be better.

Don’t get me wrong, I love a lot of the WW products. Their dark chocolate raspberry ice cream bars are to die for! So creamy and delicious, yet only 2 p+. Can’t go wrong with that! But this got me thinking… Just because I’m on the WW program I don’t have to eat only WW products. In fact, that’s the beauty of the program – I can eat anything I want (within reason of course!). So as I was perusing the frozen meal aisle I started reading nutrition info on several other products.

Today, I enjoyed a delicious Kashi Lemongrass Coconut Chicken entree. What I like about Kashi in general is that they use whole grains, and minimally process their foods. The products of theirs that I love are FULL of fiber, protein, and natural ingredients. This lunch entree was no exception! It was tasty, aromatic, and very filling. The textures of the grains and rice were very appealing, the combination of coconut and lemongrass flavoring was delicious and a little exotic. 🙂 And the best part… IT WAS ONLY 7 P+!! Seriously?!?

I write all of this to say, don’t get stuck in a rut! Just because you are following a certain plan, or you are trying to stick to a certain type of diet it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy new foods, brands, products, etc. There is a world of new flavors, foods, varieties, and options. If you do your research and read those labels you may be surprised at just how good for you some of those options can be.

Don’t get me wrong, nothing can replace the control and benefits of cooking your own foods, but at the end of the day, there are some pretty darn good substitutions out there. 🙂

I was going through some old journals and came across an entry from early 2006. It was a list of my goals for the year:

Lose 60 pounds (5 lbs a month)

Stop negative thinking towards myself

Exercise more

Make better food choices

It struck me how similar my goals today are to those I so wanted to keep five years ago. And then I thought, wow, where would I be today if I had been able to meet those goals? I’ve always doubted myself, been my worst critic, and had unrealistic expectations for myself. In doing so, I’ve only set myself up for failure. Had I given myself some grace, allowed the mistakes, forgiven the bad days rather than beat myself up for them, where would I be today?

Unfortunately, or fortunately, I can’t answer that. But I do know I’ve had similar goals to those for most of my life… lose weight, exercise more, eat better, cut myself some slack.

For some reason, I haven’t been able to get past my perceived failures. I’ve used up every excuse in the book to stay right where I was five years ago. I’ve had some successes along the way, but I usually just end up eating myself right back to where I started.

So what’s different this time? Of the dozens hundreds of times I’ve started a diet and/or exercise routine, why is this go round different? Why is it I feel I will succeed this time when I never have before?

I’m different this time.

There is no failure, there are no excuses. This is not a diet or routine. This is my life. I am not perfect, and I will never be perfect. So, each day, I get up and remind myself of my intention to be healthy. Everytime I face a temptation or desire that is not healthy I do my best to avoid it and find an alternative. I refuse to berate, belittle, beat up myself for being human. Instead, I choose to learn from it, grow from it, and MOVE ON. Easier said than done, but one day at a time and I’m getting there.

The goals are different.

Of course the end result may look the same – drop weight, eat better, exercise more – but the road to get there is so different. The end result is NOT my focus. Weird, I know. My focus is right now, today, this moment doing the best I can to make the healthiest choices. And the biggest and hardest part of that is not allowing my poor choices to dictate future choices. Rather than beating myself up for that bowl of ice cream, or skipping that workout, I try to figure out a way to fight that choice the next time.

I freeze fat-free, sugar-free yogarts and you know what? They give me the feeling of eating ice cream with about 350 less calories!

When I don’t want to go to the gym, or my schedule gets in the way, I try to do things around the house or use a dvd.

When I get caught up with the number on the scale, the measurement, the end result I lose focus of the process. I lose the reasons behind doing it all in the first place. Do I want to lose weight? Duh! But if I don’t change ME I will never be truly successful. So I focus on creating and maintaining healthy habits. Daily setting my intentions on the steps to get me to a healthier, happier me.

Yesterday started out great. The majority of the day I was not hungry, and rarely thought of food. I went to the gym, got home and cooked a yummy dinner, and was amazed that I was not hungry. Usually I am famished at dinner time, but tonight it took me forever to finish my bowl of homemade “Mexican Chili” (my own concoction 🙂 ). I was worried that I’d be really hungry later, but I had a good buffer of calories so I knew that I could have a sensible snack and still see a calorie deficit for the day.

And then, it hit. Not only was I a little hungry, I wanted to eat! Anything, everything, whatever I could find. Rather than giving in completely, I did have a snack. And then another snack. Granted, if I had eaten what I really wanted, I would have most likely consumed 1000+ calories. Luckily, that did not happen. But, I did manage to go over my calorie allotment, AND my choices were not that great… ugh…

Fast forward to today… I’ve basically eaten identical meals to yesterday, but I’m hungry! I’m feeling very munchy and it’s frustrating me. Here I thought I was doing so well, and really I have, but it feels like I’m going backwards today. And here I am again, trying to find that balance. Balance of making good choices while not depriving myself OR overindulging. Balance of not beating myself up, but learning from myself

At the end of the day, my food intake yesterday will not make or break my health goals. However, if I let every day be like yesterday (or worse) I will end up right back where I started. So today, in this moment, I’m pushing myself to continue making good choices, to not give up, to not give in. Challenges are a part of life. Yesterday was not my worst day, and that day may still be to come. What I have to focus on is the present. I can’t change what I did yesterday. But I can take this frustration, and learn from it in the hopes of making better choices when faced with the same emotions/thoughts/etc as I was yesterday. This is so much easier said than done. But I think it’s possible.

You may have heard others talk about this subject, and it’s definitely something that’s piqued my interest. Dr. Oz speaks a lot about the importance of “Waist Management” and since reading his book YOU: On a DietI learned a lot about the importance of banishing the belly fat. In fact, the topic has intrigued me to the point that I’m considering using my waist measurement rather than my weight on the scale to judge my success.

Don’t get me wrong, obviously there is a correlation to losing inches and pounds. But I have found in all my years of dieting that the scale has a huge negative impact on me personally. I dread the scale. I hate it in fact. I do everything in my power to “trick” said scale into cooperating with me and all of my hard work. Obviously, I have some scale issues. 🙂

Now measuring my waist, on the other hand, seems a little exciting. The biggest down side to this method is that it’s going to be a lot slower going than seeing pounds drop on the scale. But think of it this way: even losing 1/4, 1/2 or 1″ is still progress. Imagine losing 1/2″ a week for 12 weeks. That’s 6 inches off your waist. And I’m nearly convinced that if the measurement stays the same for a couple weeks it won’t be nearly as devestating as seeing the same number frozen on the scale week after week. I could be wrong, but for now, this is my logic. 🙂

So, tonight, I’ll be measuring my waist with a piece of yarn. It will be a visual reminder of where I’m starting. Each week I’ll either use a new piece of yarn or mark the first one to show the difference. Haven’t decided that yet… But I’m excited to see where this leads.

Also, last night I did an amazing walk on the treadmill. I say amazing because I detest the treadmill, but this time I actually enjoyed it. 1.35 miles in 30.03 minutes with a 2-3 incline burning 286 calories. I then did my arms on 3 separate machines for a total of 9 reps of 12-16 with 25 pounds. I was at muscle failure by the time I was done! Tonight I’ll be on the treadmill or the elliptical and then doing my legs. And for once, I’m actually looking forward to the gym. 🙂