SELF - I GREAT I AM!

​10 Things Productive People Do Before Bed

​10 Things Productive People Do Before Bed

The most productive people all have certain habits in their daily routines that contribute to their success. They understand that their success starts and ends with their mental and physical health, which is almost entirely dependent upon their habits before bedtime.​So, here’re 10 things successful and super productive people do that leads them being in the top 20 percent of money earners in our society​1. They review their daySteve Jobs was a strong proponent of living life to the fullest every day. He wonderfully explained this concept when he said: “Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me. Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful, that’s what matters to me.”

All successful and wealthy people, before going to sleep, they think about if what are doing has meaning. At the end of each day, they think about how have positively contributed to the world and review if the goals achieved are in line with their overall vision. Thus, they make plans to track their progress and take notes to put the best in every single things they do.​So today, before going to sleep, review your day because it will force you to clarify what you want and motivate you to take action on your goals.​2. They write down their thoughtsEmmy-winning talk-show host Ellen DeGeneres used to write down her thoughts, feelings and emotions when she was younger: “Writing is truly cathartic, because it just lets it all out and brings the best out of you”.

Super productive and successful people write down their thoughts, sensations, feelings and emotions. They try to analyze when and why things went right and wrong.

They write to improve their communication and thinking skills to be a better leader. So, by writing things down you can help yourself to sharpen your thinking, clear your mind, destroy negative self-talk and pay attention to your most dominant emotions through the day. Journaling may tell you something that you haven’t really paid much attention to about yourself or about your life.​People like Theodore Roosevelt, Thomas Jefferson, Charles Darwin, Benjamin Franklin, Andrew Carnegie, Ralph Waldo Emerson and Winston Churchill kept a diary, so why not giving a shot?

​3. They stick their noses into booksThis is the proof that readers are great leaders. Microsoft billionaire Bill Gates is an avid reader. Each night before bed, he spends an hour reading a book, ranging on a variety of topics.

Many successful people in the world are voracious readers. They read at least for 10-20 minutes before going to bed every day and they learn from what others talk about. They expand their know-how to be better prepared to lead and motivate their team and build multimillionaire businesses.​Another big benefit from sticking your nose into a good book on a nightly basis is because reading improve the long term health of your brain.​

​4. They set priorities for the next morningWith so many things happening on a daily basis it can be really easy to lose focus on what you are trying to accomplish. That’s why, before bed time, productive people review their schedule and plan for the following day.

They make a list of everything they have to do and before they start working they set priorities on the list. This allow them to go into the next workday feeling better prepared, more confident, and less stressed.

​Include this life-changing tip in your daily routine by writing down your top 3 to 5 most important tasks you need to do the next day. If for any reason you don’t do this, it should be the first thing you do every morning. And remember, every minute spent in planning saves 10 minutes in execution.

​5. They spend quality time with family“A man should never neglect his family for business.” -Walt Disney

Totally true! You have to spend quality time with your family in order to get connected and stay connected. Life is really hectic, and whatever you are an entrepreneur or an employee it always feels like there are a million things to do and the clock is against you.​But it’s really important to treat time with your family as a priority. So spend more time having meaningful conversations with your children, siblings or parents. Turn off the TV, eat dinner with your family and talk. The more time you spend together, the better chance you have of sharing quality experiences

​6. They get things doneSuper productive people use their skills, talents, energies, and knowledge to the fullest extent possible. They do the things that need to be done, not just the things they like to do. They are willing to work hard and to commit themselves to getting the job done by the end of the day.​Nobody knows this better than US President Barack Obama that start the day the night before. When he awakens at seven, he already has a jump on things. We all have 24 hours and you need to use your time wisely, that’s why successful people squeeze the most out of those 24 hours as they can.

​7. They do a digital detoxAfter being collapsed to the floor from exhaustion and lack of sleep, Arianna Huffington has been an evangelist for “unplugging”. In her best-selling book Thrive, she shares the importance of disconnect from our hectic life, relax and take care of our body and soul, redefining what it means to be successful in today’s world.​So, every night before bed, put your phone in another room, turn off the Tv and spent some time in stillness. You will feel your energy soar and overall health improve. In addition, you will have more time for other activities you really enjoy.​

8. They spend time in natureThere is no greater example than Sir Richard Branson. However as Branson has demonstrated throughout his hectic business career, that doesn’t mean you have to cut out the things you enjoy most in life. To be refreshed and ready for anything, you need to find time to go in nature and have fun.​If you can’t swim in the crystal clear water of the Caribbean, having a walk routine could be a perfect way to turn off your thoughts about work after a stressful day and reflect on different things that interest you or to just empty your mind and enjoy the silence.​

9. They meditateRussell Simmons, Tim Ferriss and Oprah Winfrey, just to name a few, all meditate in the morning and before bed to perform to their full potential throughout the day. In fact, when our mind is more relaxed we are more receptive to ideas and find even easier to focus on frustrating tasks.​So set aside 10 minutes each day before going to sleep to meditate and let your thoughts flow naturally. The next day you will be more energetic, focused and productive.​

10. They envision their futureMany successful people take a few minutes before bed to envision a positive outcome unfolding for the projects they’re working on.

​Oprah Winfrey is one of the world’s super productive people who use visualization techniques to picture tomorrow’s success and get clarity on challenges and obstacles. So, spend a few minutes each night visualizing yourself as successful the next day. This will help motivate you to make it happen because you’ve already seen it in your mind’s eye.

If you can develop these 10 habits of successful people you will increase your productivity overnight and your life will be a lot better. So, what successful habits do you practice before going to bed?

​Maybe - Depression is the result of an idle mind

​I do not have a better definition of depression than this one “Depression is an emotional state of dejection and sadness, ranging from mild discouragement and downheartedness to feelings of utter hopelessness and despair.”

​Sooner or later all of us know what it means to be depressed. Almost every person, somewhere between birth and death, will come to terms with depression. Although there seldom is a single cause for depression, stress is a major source.

Stress results from pressure, conflict, strain, or just plain, old physical exertion. It is one of the forces we have to learn to live with in today’s world, and depression is one of the body’s ways of dealing with stress.

Neurochemistry is another factor in depression. When a person’s neurochemicals and neurohormones are out of balance, he or she is likely to experience depression. This kind of depression may be linked with periods of very expansive or manic behavior. This is what we sometimes call manic-depressive illness orbipolar disorder.

Because it is linked to a person’s neurochemistry, medication controls this kind of depression very well. You would attempt to restore normal liver, heart, or kidney functions through medication, so why would you want to discriminate against a medical problem with your brain? The brain is the organ of the body your spirit needs most to be healthy, so be careful to provide it with the medication it needs to serve you in a healthy way.

There are ways to know whether depression is bipolar or circumstantial. If there’s no crisis or grief or loss in your life, you can write off circumstances as a cause of your depression. Also, people who suffer from bipolar disorder usually complain that their depression is worse in the morning. Circumstantially induced depression tends to get worse as the day wears on.

​Depression does not always take you into deep valleys. It comes in all ranges, from the “blues,” which will usually run their course in three or four days, to grief reactions which may last six months to two years. (If the grief results from sudden and unexpected death, it may last as long as five years.)

Never take risks with depressed family members and friends. If they begin to talk about suicide, get them to a doctor – a psychologist, psychiatrist, or the family physician who can refer them to a mental health professional. If we can protect them and bring them back from the brink of suicide, they will recover from the depression with no lasting harm. And, in most cases, the person will never be suicidal again.​There are ways to help people with depression:A combination of counseling and medication is the shortest way out of depression. Do not shortchange yourself on either end of that approach.

These suggestions may help you get through the pain of depression:The way you feel reflects your estimate of your self-worth. When you measure self-worth by feelings, your depression only deepens

​Remember the transient nature of your feelings. You have been depressed before and survived it; you will survive this, too

​Learn to rate the depressions you have experienced and that you now experience on a ten-point scale: one being the least you have even been depressed, to ten being the most you have ever been depressed. This will protect you from generalising any low feelings in your present to your future. Doing this helps you keep your present depression in perspective and reminds you that you have suffered worse depressions – and you have always survived them in the past. Remembering how past depressions came to an end can help you survive your present depression.

Understand the need to recover from grief and allow yourself a normal recovery. Do not rush your recovery from grief-induced depression. Realise that grief work of several months after a great loss is normal. Normalising your recovery itself will help you find hope.

Sometimes it is necessary to stay away from people who are a source of negative conversation, complaints, and criticism. Some families are this way, continually talking in the negative, seeing a glass always half empty instead of half full.

Our feelings determine our thoughts and our conversations, both internal conversation and those conversations we have with others. We learn to “feel” at least two years before we learn to talk. A child growing up in a home where there is little peace and harmony but a lot of yelling and even violence has more pain underneath his thought process than he has pleasure. So we must be sure we talk positively around family members, especially around children

Here are some guidelines for dealing with depression:

Accept a certain amount of depression as being par for the fairway of life. All of us get into the rough once in a while. If your depression does not last more than a few days, forget it.

Find the source of stress causing your depression. In our fast-paced, stressful society, look at what is happening in your family, your marriage, your job, and your community. It is important to identify the source of the stress and deal with it.

Allow your life experience to be a positive, “up” time in your life. Don’t be a critical or negative.

If your depression is medical, allow yourself the medications you need to bring relief until someone or something helps you experience a more perfect form of healing. Denying yourself medical help also denies greater productivity from your life. Take care of your mental health just as you would your physical health.

When you are suffering from a loss or a crisis in your life that has brought depression, it is very important for your recovery to talk about it. Good counseling is important, either from a trusted friend or competent mental health professional.

Stay busy and avoid brooding over your depression. There is a lot of truth to the old adage that “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop.” Stay busy and active. Do things you normally would enjoy, even if you do not enjoy them while depressed. They are familiar to you and will keep you from brooding.

Note: if you suffer from depression and want help to fill your time with creative activities, please do get in touch, I'm always looking for help with Great News.

Life Lessons to Learn From Robin Williams

​Robin Williams - Long live to King of Comedy

The death of Robin Williams touched everyone. It’s hard to find anyone who wasn’t touched by this man through his acting and humor.

His death brought depression into the national spotlight and created a discussion around this silent disease. That alone is something to be grateful to Robin Williams for, but we are lucky because he left us with many more life lessons to learn from.

Looking back over his interviews and his movies, there were so much to be learned from this creative, thoughtful and wildly intelligent man. Watch his performances, read his words and listen to him speak and you will see a man who cherishes what really matters and puts into perspective the things that don’t make a difference in the end.

It was hard to narrow down the lessons he left us through his work and his words to just eleven, so we decided to focus on the lessons from his life. If you want more lessons than you just need to watch “Dead Poet’s Society” again. It’s hard to find anyone who has seen this movie who doesn’t recognize the impact it had on a generation.​Williams said this about the film:“I think ‘Dead Poets’ was probably my favorite, just to get started with the idea of doing a movie that people treated as more than a movie.”

​​1. Do what feeds your creative spirit.

​“We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering – these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love – these are what we stay alive for.”

​2. Do whatever it takes to make meaningful connections.

​“I basically started performing for my mother, going, ‘Love me!’ What drives you to perform is the need for that primal connection. When I was little, my mother was funny with me, and I started to be charming and funny for her, and I learned that by being entertaining, you make a connection with another person.”

3. Everyone has story that we know nothing about.

​ “I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.”

4. Pursue relentlessly the things you believe in.

​​“No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.”

​5. There is a lesson to be found in everything.

​​“You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren’t paying attention to.”

6. Relationships matter.

​“I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.”

​7. Sometimes the best response is no response at all.

​​“Even fools seem smart when they are quiet.”

​​8. Find the silver lining in every experience.

​​“Sometimes over things that I did, movies that didn’t turn out very well – you go, ‘Why did you do that?’ But in the end, I can’t regret them because I met amazing people. There was always something that was worth it.”

​9. Keep alive the things that make you feel alive.

​“You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.”

​10. Even the most brilliant, confident and most successful people are insecure at times.

​“The essential truth is that sometimes you’re worried that they’ll find out it’s a fluke, that you don’t really have it. You’ve lost the muse or – the worst dread – you never had it at all. I went through all that madness early on.”

​11. There is always a need for hustle.

​“Winning an Oscar is an honor, but, between you and me, it does not makes things easier.”

Robin Williams taught us about the importance of self-love and the healing benefits of laughter. The loss of such a great talent and human is still felt today. There is much to learn from this beautiful spirit and it starts with finding the humor in everything. Laughing at something that makes you want to cry makes that thing much less scary.

It is still hard to fathom that this brilliant, talented, funny and somewhat tortured soul left this world so tragically.​We’ll leave you with this quote from “Dead Poet’s Society”:“Seize the day. Because, believe it or not, each and every one of us in this room is one day going to stop breathing, turn cold and die.”

“Oh captain, my captain,” We Honor You.

Wealth Creation

​The ancient Egyptians had a beautiful belief about death. When their souls got to the entrance to heaven the gods asked them two questions. Their answers determined whether they were admitted or not. The first question is, have you found joy in your life? If the answer is yes, the following question will be has your life brought joy to others? Accumulating wealth without bring joy to other people’s life means nothing, we come to this world empty handed and we shall leave empty handed too.

Here is my promise to you...

My name is Paul Cardall, and I'm going to share with you two ways to create great wealth. The first is how to save money, and the second is how to create money.

Lessons Everyone Should Learn About Money & Wealth Creation

You must know how to handle the biggest of all drugs – money. Yes, it is a drug, the lack of it or its overdose can cause serious financial and emotional damage. The only way to properly handle the powerful drug of money and not get addicted is by acquiring sound financial knowledge – the understanding of how money functions.

Money is unfair, so learn its rules in order to use them to your advantage. If you respect money and play the game of money by knowing the rules, you will see a world of abundant money and will make money work for you.

Don’t be afraid of money. Instead face it with courage. In the end, it’s not equities, bonds, commodities, or real estate which will help you achieve financial freedom. It’s your knowledge about money which will make you rich and help you always stay wealthy and financially free.

One of the important rules of money is to spend money to get rich. The truly wealthy people know when to handsomely spend on what and when to cut down. By not spending on the right thing at the right time, you might be permanently closing the doors of your house to money.

Don’t work for money; rather, let money work for you. Nobody can become really rich and stay wealthy by working for money. If you keep working for money, you would just be doing that throughout your life.

Be in control of your money. If you are not in full control of your money while dealing with it – be it in earning, saving, protecting, budgeting, investing, insuring, etc. – then it will control you and you will never be able to achieve financial independence.

Invest time before you invest money. Don’t just aim at being rich without any knowledge or experience about money. Learn how money has been made and lost in this world before you commit your own money.

Don’t run after money; instead, be a financial magnet which attracts money and ensures that it always sticks around with you.

Never be a slave to money; be the master of your money. And once you become the master of your money, you will automatically start walking on the path of financial independence.

If money is your problem, money cannot be the solution; simply because the problem itself can’t be its solution. Further, the problem of money is not only its scarcity – even its excess can be a problem.

Benefits of Being an Early Riser

Several studies have correlated waking up early with success. Here's a breakdown of the benefits reaped by early risers.

Earn Better Grades

​ In a study college students who identified themselves as 'morning people' earned a full grade higher than those who were 'night owls'. Good grades help students secure better career opportunities.

​More Proactive

Early risers are more proactive. They ware more likely to agree with statements like ' I spend time identifying long-range goals for myself and ' I feel in charge of making things happen'.

​Anticipate Problems ​

Morning people are more likely to anticipate problems and minimise them efficiently, which leads to more successful in the business world.

Better Planners

Early risers report using their morning quiet time for organisation, goal-setting and planning out their days and weeks ahead.

​Time To Exercise

Many successful businesspeople get up early to exercise (before the family is awake and their official work days start). Regular exercise boosts mood and fitness, provides energy on the job and helps create deeper sleep cycles.

Get Better Sleep

Sleep experts say that if you go to bed earlier and wake up earlier your body will be more in tune with the earth's circadian rhythms, which offers more restorative sleep.

​More Optimistic ​

Various studies have shown that morning people exhibit character traits like optimism, being agreeable, satisfaction and conscientiousness. Night owls, while linked with creativity and intelligence, are more likely to exhibit traits like depression, pessimism and being neurotic.

​Easier Commutes

Several early risers report easier, less congested commutes due to leaving earlier than the crowds.

​A Quiet Hour

Those who arrive at the office before their colleagues say they relish that first hour or two that provide quiet, uninterrupted time to focus.

More Family Time

If you've gotten a jump on the day, you'll have more quality time in the evenings to spend with family. Instead of bringing work home, you can relax and unwind.

If they don't understand you, they'll try to change you. Small minds will always to try to label you, try to make sense of you and they'll fail. Let them, you continue to be you, be different - fuck 'em.

Stop & Smell The Roses

​Creating The Great News community magazine is a daunting task. There is the magazine to create (14 subjects covered and rising), the articles to write, the web site to maintain, the marketing to do, oh the marketing, what a head-scratching headache that is, then there is the day to day stuff that makes every second feel like a minute, and every minute, an hour...

It's easy to become overwhelmed by it all and wonder what the hell you are doing, and for what. My advice is to Stop and Smell the Roses - not literally, unless smelling roses is your thing - but stop what you're doing, step away from your computer (or your tool of choice) and take time to think about the WHY!

Think about your goals, about your ambitions, about what you wish to accomplish, then and only then can you justify all the hard work.

I struggle each and every day, not to fill my time, but because I want to run the biggest and best community magazine I can create.

I want people to look at what I've created, and think, damn , if one man can create all this, on his own, with no experience, or finance, then so can I achieve my dreams.

So, if you're chasing your dreams, and 'stuff' is making you question you dreams, Stop and Smell the Roses, reconnect with your WHY!

Good Luck

Paul CardallCrafty Studios (Home of the Great News Community Magazine)

Bucket ListEveryone has one. It’s that “list of things to do before we die” that make up our bucket lists. In fact, many believe that actively living according to one’s bucket list can help to embrace life.

Embrace LifeThey say that whenever a door closes, somewhere a window opens. This is great advice by which to live. And often, dramatic downturns or pitfalls in our lives lead to the birth of our bucket lists. It is through perseverance, hard work, and strength that get us through the tough times and teach us to live each day to the fullest.

Carpe DiemA bucket list can help us do just that. It can help us to focus on doing those fun, positive things and reach powerful milestones that make our lives that much more fulfilling. Fulfill your list-before you kick the bucket.

57 small things you can do every day to be happier and more successful

my happiness and success rules in a single place. Enjoy!

1. Assume people have good intentions.Since you can't read minds, you don't really know the "why" behind the "what" that people do. Imputing evil motives to other people's weird behaviours adds extra misery to life, while assuming good intentions leaves you open to reconciliation.

3. Avoid spending time with stressed-out people.You may not realize it, but your physiology is programmed to mirror the physiology of those around you. In other words, you can "catch" stress from other people. So although it may not be possible to avoid stressed people all the time, avoid them as far as possible.

4. Begin each day with expectation.If there's any big truth about life, it's that it usually lives up to (or down to) your expectations. Therefore, when you rise from bed, make your first thought be, "Something wonderful is going to happen today." Guess what? You're probably right.

5. Breathe more deeply.Breathing deeply calms you down but, more importantly, it helps ensure that plenty of oxygen is getting into your lungs and into your blood stream, where (among other things) it helps your brain work more efficiently.

6. Celebrate more frequently.The small and large successes and accomplishments in your life deserve recognition. It's a mistake to head straight for the next task or the next goal without celebrating, even if it's only patting yourself on the back.

7. Daydream more frequently.The idea that daydreaming and working are mutually exclusive belongs back in the 20th century. It's when you let your thoughts wander that you're more likely to have the insights that will make you both unique and more competitive.

8. Decide that you MUST achieve your goals.When you approach a task that leads toward your goal, never start out by saying, "I'll try...." When you use that phrase, you're giving yourself permission to fail. Instead, phrase your action in terms of "I will...!" or "I must...!" No wiggle room allowed.

9. Define "failure" as "failing to take action."

​Regardless of your goals and milestones, you don't have control over anything except your own behaviour. Redefining failure as "failing to take action" puts failure (and therefore success) within your control.

10. Deflect partisan conversations.Arguments about politics and religion never have a "right" answer but they definitely get people all riled up over things they can't control. When such topics surface, bow out by saying something like: "Thinking about that stuff makes my head hurt."

11. Don't waste energy on hate.Hate is an emotional parasite that eats away at your energy and health. If something is wrong with the world and you can change it, take action. If you can't take action, you're better off to forgive and forget.

12. Don't take calls from strangers.

Unless you're working in telesales or product support, there's no reason you should ever take a call from somebody you don't know. After all, when was the last time you took an unexpected call that was truly important? If it's important, they'll get you through email.

13. Don't take yourself seriously.The ability to laugh at your foibles not only makes you happier as a person, it makes you more powerful, more influential, and more attractive to others. If you can't laugh at yourself, everyone else will be laughing behind your back.

14. Don't try to win every argument.Some battles aren't worth fighting, and many people are easier to handle when they think they've won the argument. What's important isn't "winning," but what you, and the other people involved, plan to do next.

15. Don't succumb to malice or gossip.Before you tell a story about anybody else, or listen to such a story, ask yourself four questions: 1) Is it true? 2) Is it kind? 3) Is it necessary? and 4) Would I want somebody telling a similar story about me?

16. Don't worry what others think about you.You can't mind-read and you don't have everyone else wired into a lie detector. Truly, you have NO IDEA what anyone is REALLY thinking about you. It's a total waste of time and energy to cling to your own idea of what that might be, especially if it's negative.

17. Drink more water.Even a tiny amount of dehydration can "drain your energy and make you tired," according to the Mayo Clinic. They recommend that men drink roughly three liters (about 13 cups) and women 2.2 liters (about nine cups) of total beverages every day.

18. Eat a big breakfast.There's truth to the old saying that you should eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a merchant, and supper like a pauper. Fuelling up early makes you less likely to need that extra jolt of sugar at about 10:30 a.m.

19. End each day with gratitude.Just before you go to bed, write down at least one wonderful thing that happened. It might be something as small as a making a child laugh or as huge as a million-dollar deal. Whatever it is, be grateful for that day because it will never come again.

20. Exercise your eyes.While working at a screen, periodically stare at something that's far away, like out the window. If necessary, get up and find a window or at least a hallway so that you can focus at a distance. This keeps your eyesight from degenerating.

21. Find the right job for YOU.While some work environments are inherently difficult, if you're consistently miserable, it's your fault. You owe it to yourself and your co-workers to either find a job that makes you happy or make the best of the job you've got.

22. If it's scary, do it now.Being successful means taking risks, and risks are inherently scary. Rather than letting fear keep you from taking action, use it as a signal that it's time to actually take action. It may sound trite, but there's real truth the old saying: "Feel the fear, then do it anyway."

23. Know and keep your personal limits.While your job might sometimes seem like the most important thing in your world, you're killing a part of yourself if you let work situations push you into places that violate your privacy and your integrity.

24. Let go of your results.The big enemy of happiness is worry, which comes from focusing on events that are outside your control. Once you've taken action, there's usually nothing more you can do. Focus on the job at hand rather than some weird fantasy of what might happen.

25. Listen to something inspiring.​Your ears are the pathway to your brain. When doing something visually boring (like driving), listen to audio books or motivation talks. When you need some extra energy, listen to music that "pumps you up."

26. Make a public commitment.To provide an extra oomph to your efforts, make a formal public commitment to your goals. For example, you might want to sign up for a charity race that you couldn't possibly run without first getting yourself in tip-top shape.

27. Make peace with your past.Focusing on past mistakes or wrongs inflicted on you is like driving a car while looking in the rearview mirror. You'll keep heading in the same direction until you collide with something solid.

28. Make your goals pervasive.Post your goals everywhere you spend time. Post them on your bathroom mirror, right behind your computer screen, and on the dashboard of your car. The more you see your goals, the easier it will be to achieve them.

29. Monitor your progress.Keep a record of what you've already accomplished. Review this when you're feeling discouraged or unsure--it's an instant confidence builder and helps you focus on the positive.

30. Never argue with strangers.​When you're driving, you're going to see people driving in ways that are stupid, dangerous, and annoying. Even so, you're wasting your energy getting upset about what they do, much less reacting to it by honking or flipping the bird.

31. Never attend agenda-less meetings.Meetings are only useful if people know why they're meeting in the first place. An agenda provides focus and purpose. The lack of an agenda guarantees meandering conversations that dive into ratholes. They're a waste of your (and everyone else's) time.

32. Realize that YOU are responsible for your emotions.Your attitude isn't controlled by the outside world. While truly sad things do happen, most of the time your attitude is the result of how you're viewing the world, rather than what's happening in it.

33. Remember that everything will change.The nature of the physical universe is change. Nothing remains the same; everything is, as the gurus say, transitory. Whether you're celebrating or mourning or something in between, this, too, will pass.

34. Remember that rejection is an illusion.Rejection is an emotionally-loaded term that people unwisely use when they fail to achieve a goal that involves another person. Nobody feels "rejected" when they set a goal to, say, run a four-minute mile, but then only end up running it in five minutes.

35. Set achievable yet inspirational goals.If you don't believe your goal is achievable, you won't take action to achieve it. Therefore, any goal that you set must be within the realm of possibility and tied to actions that you can actually take.

36. Set measurable milestones.Big goals are easier to achieve if you break them up into smaller chunks or milestones. Achieving milestones gives you more confidence, strengthens your motivation, and helps you build momentum.

37. Smile and laugh more frequently.Contrary to popular belief, smiling and laughter are not the RESULT of being happy; they're part of a cycle that both creates and reinforces happiness. Find reasons to smile. Never, ever suppress a laugh.

38. Stop comparing yourself to others.Everybody, and I mean everybody, starts out in a different place and is headed on their own journey. You have NO idea where someone else's journey might lead them, so drawing comparisons is a complete waste of time.

39. Stop complaining about not having enough time.You get the same amount of time every day as everyone else. You may feel you're short on time and that you desperately need more, but when the day started, you got your fair share: 24 hours. Nobody got any more than you did, so stop complaining.

40. Stop listening to and leaving voice mails.A voice mail message consumes minutes of your time (more if you have to replay) to communicate information you could absorb from an email in seconds. Explain in your outgoing message that you don't use voice mail and provide your email address.

41. Stretch regularly.Your body is not well suited for sitting down for long periods of time. Quite the contrary, the human body evolved so that it's optimized for running around in the woods, whacking animals with a stick.

42. Take a walk after lunch.Numerous scientific studies have shown that a walk after a meal improves your digestion, helps you regulate your blood sugar, and increases your mental acuity. It's the best way to avoid that "heavy" feeling that often follows a meal.

43. Take action immediately after setting a goal.Once you've gotten your goals set into your mind, it's time to take action. Approach each action with confidence that you'll eventually succeed. The more action you take at the beginning, the more momentum you build.

44. Take power naps.Lack of sleep is disastrous to your health and numerous studies show that people are more productive at work after taking a quick nap. Don't fall into the trap of working when you're sleepy. You'll get it done faster if you give your brain a break.

45. Take the stairs.While stair climbing doesn't consume all that many calories (about 300 if you're average height and weight and climb five flights, five times a day), it does cause your heart to work harder, thereby improving your circulation and your overall health.

46. Take time to plan and prioritize.The most common source of stress is the perception that you've got too much work to do. Rather than obsess about it, pick one thing that, if you get it done today, will move you closer to your highest goal and purpose in life. Then do that first.

47. Think of rejections as stepping stones.When I wanted to publish my first business book, I sent the proposal to dozens of editors and got plenty of "rejection" letters. Rather than feeling discouraged, I started each day by laying out the letters on the floor and walking on them as if they were stepping stones.

48. Throw out things that aren't useful or beautiful.You'll be spending about a third of your waking adult life at work. Why would you want to fill your work environment--and that part of your life--with objects that are useless and ugly?

49. Treat setbacks as success signals. Most people treat setbacks as mini-failures, and often use them as an excuse to give up...and therefore fail. Learning what doesn't work is an essential part of learning what does! Setbacks are a sign that you're making progress.

50. Turn off background TV.Many households leave their TVs on as background noise while they're doing other things. The entire point of broadcast TV is to make you dissatisfied with your life so that you'll buy more stuff. Why subliminally program yourself to be a mindless consumer?

51. Turn off depressing news.So whenever there's a news story that starts to make you angry or upset, change the channel--unless it's 100 percent relevant to your life--or click to another page. Why torture yourself needlessly? You're only draining away your own energy!

52. Turn off your computer alerts.Doing something creative, talking to somebody important, or absorbing complex information are all impossible if your computer and phone are chirping and beeping for your attention. Whatever it is, it can wait.

53. Use more positive words.When asked "How are you?" respond with "Terrific!" or "Fabulous!" or "I've never felt better!" rather than a depressing "OK" or "Getting by." Rather than saying, "I'm enraged!" say "I'm a bit annoyed"--or, better yet, "I've got a challenge."

54. Use technology to stay focused.Set reminders in your email and calendar programs to keep you focused on achieving your goals rather than just noting activities that pop up throughout your daily life. Harness technology to focus your efforts rather than distract them.

55. Work 40 hours a week (or less).Workaholics may think they're accomplishing more than the less fanatical worker, but in fact, long hours result in stressed-out people who get too sick to work and produce sloppy results that must be either scrapped or redone.

56. Write your goals down on paper.Talk is cheap, so goals aren't real unless they're written down on paper, by hand. This subliminally tells your mind that these goals are IMPORTANT and DIFFERENT, as opposed to a text email that you send to yourself, which is soon composed and soon forgotten.

57. Write your goals out every day.The more frequently you write your goals down on paper, the more power they've got. When Scott Adams, of Dilbert fame, wants to achieve a goal, he writes that goal down 10 times every morning.

Lets create a Rules of Happiness Desktop Calendar kit​1. Assume people have good intentions.Since you can't read minds, you don't really know the "why" behind the "what" that people do. Imputing evil motives to other people's weird behaviours adds extra misery to life, while assuming good intentions leaves you open to reconciliation.

3. Avoid spending time with stressed-out people.You may not realize it, but your physiology is programmed to mirror the physiology of those around you. In other words, you can "catch" stress from other people. So although it may not be possible to avoid stressed people all the time, avoid them as far as possible.

4. Begin each day with expectation.If there's any big truth about life, it's that it usually lives up to (or down to) your expectations. Therefore, when you rise from bed, make your first thought be, "Something wonderful is going to happen today." Guess what? You're probably right.

5. Breathe more deeply.Breathing deeply calms you down but, more importantly, it helps ensure that plenty of oxygen is getting into your lungs and into your blood stream, where (among other things) it helps your brain work more efficiently.

6. Celebrate more frequently.The small and large successes and accomplishments in your life deserve recognition. It's a mistake to head straight for the next task or the next goal without celebrating, even if it's only patting yourself on the back.

7. Daydream more frequently.The idea that daydreaming and working are mutually exclusive belongs back in the 20th century. It's when you let your thoughts wander that you're more likely to have the insights that will make you both unique and more competitive.

8. Decide that you MUST achieve your goals.When you approach a task that leads toward your goal, never start out by saying, "I'll try...." When you use that phrase, you're giving yourself permission to fail. Instead, phrase your action in terms of "I will...!" or "I must...!" No wiggle room allowed.

9. Define "failure" as "failing to take action."​Regardless of your goals and milestones, you don't have control over anything except your own behaviour. Redefining failure as "failing to take action" puts failure (and therefore success) within your control.

10. Deflect partisan conversations.Arguments about politics and religion never have a "right" answer but they definitely get people all riled up over things they can't control. When such topics surface, bow out by saying something like: "Thinking about that stuff makes my head hurt."

11. Don't waste energy on hate.Hate is an emotional parasite that eats away at your energy and health. If something is wrong with the world and you can change it, take action. If you can't take action, you're better off to forgive and forget.

12. Don't take calls from strangers.Unless you're working in telesales or product support, there's no reason you should ever take a call from somebody you don't know. After all, when was the last time you took an unexpected call that was truly important? If it's important, they'll get you through email.

13. Don't take yourself seriously.The ability to laugh at your foibles not only makes you happier as a person, it makes you more powerful, more influential, and more attractive to others. If you can't laugh at yourself, everyone else will be laughing behind your back.

14. Don't try to win every argument.Some battles aren't worth fighting, and many people are easier to handle when they think they've won the argument. What's important isn't "winning," but what you, and the other people involved, plan to do next.

15. Don't succumb to malice or gossip.Before you tell a story about anybody else, or listen to such a story, ask yourself four questions: 1) Is it true? 2) Is it kind? 3) Is it necessary? and 4) Would I want somebody telling a similar story about me?

16. Don't worry what others think about you.You can't mind-read and you don't have everyone else wired into a lie detector. Truly, you have NO IDEA what anyone is REALLY thinking about you. It's a total waste of time and energy to cling to your own idea of what that might be, especially if it's negative.17. Drink more water.Even a tiny amount of dehydration can "drain your energy and make you tired," according to the Mayo Clinic. They recommend that men drink roughly three liters (about 13 cups) and women 2.2 liters (about nine cups) of total beverages every day.

18. Eat a big breakfast.There's truth to the old saying that you should eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a merchant, and supper like a pauper. Fuelling up early makes you less likely to need that extra jolt of sugar at about 10:30 a.m.

19. End each day with gratitude.Just before you go to bed, write down at least one wonderful thing that happened. It might be something as small as a making a child laugh or as huge as a million-dollar deal. Whatever it is, be grateful for that day because it will never come again.20. Exercise your eyes.While working at a screen, periodically stare at something that's far away, like out the window. If necessary, get up and find a window or at least a hallway so that you can focus at a distance. This keeps your eyesight from degenerating.

21. Find the right job for YOU.While some work environments are inherently difficult, if you're consistently miserable, it's your fault. You owe it to yourself and your co-workers to either find a job that makes you happy or make the best of the job you've got.

22. If it's scary, do it now.Being successful means taking risks, and risks are inherently scary. Rather than letting fear keep you from taking action, use it as a signal that it's time to actually take action. It may sound trite, but there's real truth the old saying: "Feel the fear, then do it anyway."

23. Know and keep your personal limits.While your job might sometimes seem like the most important thing in your world, you're killing a part of yourself if you let work situations push you into places that violate your privacy and your integrity.

24. Let go of your results.The big enemy of happiness is worry, which comes from focusing on events that are outside your control. Once you've taken action, there's usually nothing more you can do. Focus on the job at hand rather than some weird fantasy of what might happen.

25. Listen to something inspiring.​Your ears are the pathway to your brain. When doing something visually boring (like driving), listen to audio books or motivation talks. When you need some extra energy, listen to music that "pumps you up."

26. Make a public commitment.To provide an extra oomph to your efforts, make a formal public commitment to your goals. For example, you might want to sign up for a charity race that you couldn't possibly run without first getting yourself in tip-top shape.

27. Make peace with your past.Focusing on past mistakes or wrongs inflicted on you is like driving a car while looking in the rearview mirror. You'll keep heading in the same direction until you collide with something solid.

28. Make your goals pervasive.Post your goals everywhere you spend time. Post them on your bathroom mirror, right behind your computer screen, and on the dashboard of your car. The more you see your goals, the easier it will be to achieve them.

29. Monitor your progress.Keep a record of what you've already accomplished. Review this when you're feeling discouraged or unsure--it's an instant confidence builder and helps you focus on the positive.

30. Never argue with strangers.​When you're driving, you're going to see people driving in ways that are stupid, dangerous, and annoying. Even so, you're wasting your energy getting upset about what they do, much less reacting to it by honking or flipping the bird.

31. Never attend agenda-less meetings.Meetings are only useful if people know why they're meeting in the first place. An agenda provides focus and purpose. The lack of an agenda guarantees meandering conversations that dive into ratholes. They're a waste of your (and everyone else's) time.

32. Realise that YOU are responsible for your emotions.Your attitude isn't controlled by the outside world. While truly sad things do happen, most of the time your attitude is the result of how you're viewing the world, rather than what's happening in it.

33. Remember that everything will change.The nature of the physical universe is change. Nothing remains the same; everything is, as the gurus say, transitory. Whether you're celebrating or mourning or something in between, this, too, will pass.

34. Remember that rejection is an illusion.Rejection is an emotionally-loaded term that people unwisely use when they fail to achieve a goal that involves another person. Nobody feels "rejected" when they set a goal to, say, run a four-minute mile, but then only end up running it in five minutes.

35. Set achievable yet inspirational goals.If you don't believe your goal is achievable, you won't take action to achieve it. Therefore, any goal that you set must be within the realm of possibility and tied to actions that you can actually take.

36. Set measurable milestones.Big goals are easier to achieve if you break them up into smaller chunks or milestones. Achieving milestones gives you more confidence, strengthens your motivation, and helps you build momentum.

37. Smile and laugh more frequently.Contrary to popular belief, smiling and laughter are not the RESULT of being happy; they're part of a cycle that both creates and reinforces happiness. Find reasons to smile. Never, ever suppress a laugh.

38. Stop comparing yourself to others.Everybody, and I mean everybody, starts out in a different place and is headed on their own journey. You have NO idea where someone else's journey might lead them, so drawing comparisons is a complete waste of time.

39. Stop complaining about not having enough time.You get the same amount of time every day as everyone else. You may feel you're short on time and that you desperately need more, but when the day started, you got your fair share: 24 hours. Nobody got any more than you did, so stop complaining.

40. Stop listening to and leaving voice mails.A voice mail message consumes minutes of your time (more if you have to replay) to communicate information you could absorb from an email in seconds. Explain in your outgoing message that you don't use voice mail and provide your email address.

41. Stretch regularly.​Your body is not well suited for sitting down for long periods of time. Quite the contrary, the human body evolved so that it's optimized for running around in the woods, whacking animals with a stick.

42. Take a walk after lunch.Numerous scientific studies have shown that a walk after a meal improves your digestion, helps you regulate your blood sugar, and increases your mental acuity. It's the best way to avoid that "heavy" feeling that often follows a meal.

43. Take action immediately after setting a goal.Once you've gotten your goals set into your mind, it's time to take action. Approach each action with confidence that you'll eventually succeed. The more action you take at the beginning, the more momentum you build.

44. Take power naps.Lack of sleep is disastrous to your health and numerous studies show that people are more productive at work after taking a quick nap. Don't fall into the trap of working when you're sleepy. You'll get it done faster if you give your brain a break.

45. Take the stairs.While stair climbing doesn't consume all that many calories (about 300 if you're average height and weight and climb five flights, five times a day), it does cause your heart to work harder, thereby improving your circulation and your overall health.

46. Take time to plan and prioritise.The most common source of stress is the perception that you've got too much work to do. Rather than obsess about it, pick one thing that, if you get it done today, will move you closer to your highest goal and purpose in life. Then do that first.

47. Think of rejections as steppingstones.When I wanted to publish my first business book, I sent the proposal to dozens of editors and got plenty of "rejection" letters. Rather than feeling discouraged, I started each day by laying out the letters on the floor and walking on them as if they were steppingstones.

48. Throw out things that aren't useful or beautiful.You'll be spending about a third of your waking adult life at work. Why would you want to fill your work environment--and that part of your life--with objects that are useless and ugly?

49. Treat setbacks as success signals. Most people treat setbacks as mini-failures, and often use them as an excuse to give up...and therefore fail. Learning what doesn't work is an essential part of learning what does! Setbacks are a sign that you're making progress.

50. Turn off background TV.Many households leave their TVs on as background noise while they're doing other things. The entire point of broadcast TV is to make you dissatisfied with your life so that you'll buy more stuff. Why subliminally program yourself to be a mindless consumer?

51. Turn off depressing news.So whenever there's a news story that starts to make you angry or upset, change the channel--unless it's 100 percent relevant to your life--or click to another page. Why torture yourself needlessly? You're only draining away your own energy!

52. Turn off your computer alerts.Doing something creative, talking to somebody important, or absorbing complex information are all impossible if your computer and phone are chirping and beeping for your attention. Whatever it is, it can wait.

53. Use more positive words.When asked "How are you?" respond with "Terrific!" or "Fabulous!" or "I've never felt better!" rather than a depressing "OK" or "Getting by." Rather than saying, "I'm enraged!" say "I'm a bit annoyed"--or, better yet, "I've got a challenge."

54. Use technology to stay focused.Set reminders in your email and calendar programs to keep you focused on achieving your goals rather than just noting activities that pop up throughout your daily life. Harness technology to focus your efforts rather than distract them.

55. Work 40 hours a week (or less).Workaholics may think they're accomplishing more than the less fanatical worker, but in fact, long hours result in stressed-out people who get too sick to work and produce sloppy results that must be either scrapped or redone.

56. Write your goals down on paper.Talk is cheap, so goals aren't real unless they're written down on paper, by hand. This subliminally tells your mind that these goals are IMPORTANT and DIFFERENT, as opposed to a text email that you send to yourself, which is soon composed and soon forgotten.

57. Write your goals out every day.The more frequently you write your goals down on paper, the more power they've got. When Scott Adams, of Dilbert fame, wants to achieve a goal, he writes that goal down 10 times every morning.

​Maybe - Depression is the result of an idle mind

​I do not have a better definition of depression than this one “Depression is an emotional state of dejection and sadness, ranging from mild discouragement and downheartedness to feelings of utter hopelessness and despair.”

​Sooner or later all of us know what it means to be depressed. Almost every person, somewhere between birth and death, will come to terms with depression. Although there seldom is a single cause for depression,stress is a major source.

Stress results from pressure, conflict, strain, or just plain, old physical exertion. It is one of the forces we have to learn to live with in today’s world, and depression is one of the body’s ways of dealing with stress.

Neurochemistry is another factor in depression. When a person’s neurochemicals and neurohormones are out of balance, he or she is likely to experience depression. This kind of depression may be linked with periods of very expansive or manic behavior. This is what we sometimes call manic-depressive illness orbipolar disorder.

Because it is linked to a person’s neurochemistry, medication controls this kind of depression very well. You would attempt to restore normal liver, heart, or kidney functions through medication, so why would you want to discriminate against a medical problem with your brain? The brain is the organ of the body your spirit needs most to be healthy, so be careful to provide it with the medication it needs to serve you in a healthy way.

There are ways to know whether depression is bipolar or circumstantial. If there’s no crisis or grief or loss in your life, you can write off circumstances as a cause of your depression. Also, people who suffer from bipolar disorder usually complain that their depression is worse in the morning. Circumstantially induced depression tends to get worse as the day wears on.

​Depression does not always take you into deep valleys. It comes in all ranges, from the “blues,” which will usually run their course in three or four days, to grief reactions which may last six months to two years. (If the grief results from sudden and unexpected death, it may last as long as five years.)

Never take risks with depressed family members and friends. If they begin to talk about suicide, get them to a doctor – a psychologist, psychiatrist, or the family physician who can refer them to a mental health professional. If we can protect them and bring them back from the brink of suicide, they will recover from the depression with no lasting harm. And, in most cases, the person will never be suicidal again.​There are ways to help people with depression:A combination of counseling and medication is the shortest way out of depression. Do not shortchange yourself on either end of that approach. ​These suggestions may help you get through the pain of depression:The way you feel reflects your estimate of your self-worth. When you measure self-worth by feelings, your depression only deepens

​Remember the transient nature of your feelings. You have been depressed before and survived it; you will survive this, too

​Learn to rate the depressions you have experienced and that you now experience on a ten-point scale: one being the least you have even been depressed, to ten being the most you have ever been depressed. This will protect you from generalising any low feelings in your present to your future.

Doing this helps you keep your present depression in perspective and reminds you that you have suffered worse depressions – and you have always survived them in the past. Remembering how past depressions came to an end can help you survive your present depression.

Understand the need to recover from grief and allow yourself a normal recovery. Do not rush your recovery from grief-induced depression. Realise that grief work of several months after a great loss is normal. Normalising your recovery itself will help you find hope.

Sometimes it is necessary to stay away from people who are a source of negative conversation, complaints, and criticism. Some families are this way, continually talking in the negative, seeing a glass always half empty instead of half full.

Our feelings determine our thoughts and our conversations, both internal conversation and those conversations we have with others.

We learn to “feel” at least two years before we learn to talk. A child growing up in a home where there is little peace and harmony but a lot of yelling and even violence has more pain underneath his thought process than he has pleasure. So we must be sure we talk positively around family members, especially around children.

Here are some guidelines for dealing with depression:

Accept a certain amount of depression as being par for the fairway of life. All of us get into the rough once in a while. If your depression does not last more than a few days, forget it.

Find the source of stress causing your depression. In our fast-paced, stressful society, look at what is happening in your family, your marriage, your job, and your community. It is important to identify the source of the stress and deal with it.

Allow your life experience to be a positive, “up” time in your life. Don’t be a critical or negative.

If your depression is medical, allow yourself the medications you need to bring relief until someone or something helps you experience a more perfect form of healing. Denying yourself medical help also denies greater productivity from your life. Take care of your mental health just as you would your physical health.

When you are suffering from a loss or a crisis in your life that has brought depression, it is very important for your recovery to talk about it. Good counseling is important, either from a trusted friend or competent mental health professional.

Stay busy and avoid brooding over your depression. There is a lot of truth to the old adage that “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop.” Stay busy and active. Do things you normally would enjoy, even if you do not enjoy them while depressed. They are familiar to you and will keep you from brooding.

Note: if you suffer from depression and want help to fill your time with creative activities, please do get in touch, I'm always looking for help with Great News.

Closed-minded people are judgmental, opinionated, and full of criticism.

There is an inspirational quote going through the Internet that says, “The problem with closed minded people, is that their mouth is always open.” These people have an answer to everything without ever participating in a true solution. They have no idea what anyone is going through with challenges and obstacles.

​They open up their mouths and give way to uneducated and obnoxious ideas. They are ignorant, self-righteous and demanding. And, they know no wrongdoing.​Unfortunately, closed-minded people are everywhere. It may be your uncle, your sister, your cousin, your boss, or a distant family friend. You can’t really escape their attitude, but you can get clever with how to respond to their words. closed-minded folks are usually driven by fear. How we react is based on our own resistance.

Ways to respond to closed-minded people:

Do not share personal things with them.

Inspirational author Steve Pavlina shares ideas from his book “Personal Development for Smart People” on how to deal with the toxic arrogance that happens with closed-minded people.

“When you encounter people who are very close-minded, you’ll often find yourself becoming resistant to the other person’s position. You think the problem lies with the other person, but if you define it that way, you’ll beat your head against the wall in frustration. The real source of your frustration is your own resistance, not the other person.”

So in view of his research and findings, the best way to deal with such behaviors is usually by not sharing personal information. If you already know what triggers the person to judge and criticize, stay off the subjects. Try to deflect by smiling and thanking them for their wisdom!

Let them know you didn’t ask for permission.We give power to closed-minded individuals when we ask them for opinions and permission.If you know what you are up against, don’t ask for advice. Sometimes when we speak, we don’t realize how things are misinterpreted, so perhaps you were just needing confirmation on a subject. But you didn’t ask their permission. Be aware of how you phrase things.

​That person will come at you with their beliefs. And, in that moment, you will realize that this is not what you meant to do or say. The best way to overcome this is by answering, “Let’s agree to disagree since I really wasn’t asking your permission.” And then walk away because their ego will always control their mouth.

Be truthful to how you feel.Some people are like skunks. You can smell them before even seeing them.When a subject comes up that the closed-minded individual starts to bulldoze over, make sure you let them know that you aren’t having it. Let them know straight away that their opinion stinks. This may hurt that person but it will also stop future arguments. No one wants to be humiliated. You are putting barricades up before the skunk can sneak into your place. You can let them know that “it’s not up for discussion.”

Maintain a positive outlook no matter what.Closed-minded people are not optimists. They see the world through fear and anxiety.They judge because of ignorance and differences. A way to disarm them is to stay positive. Whatever they say, try and spin it with sunshine. They don’t know what to do with it. Their world is full of pessimism. Sing them a child’s catchy Disney tune. You are not mocking them, you are shutting them up. They already think you are crazy, so step onto the stage. Nothing stops them from irrational behavior more than unpredictable actions.

Don’t take it personally.Sometimes it’s easier said than done.When we are passionate about a subject matter, we become the subject. Recognize that negative closed-minded folks can’t see the other side of the coin. They are reacting to their own judgments and ideas. Perhaps they aren’t educated on the discussion. They are repeating what they have heard on the news or through other groups similar to them. When you step back, recognize that you have an opportunity to educate this person. Don’t take on the judgment as an attack. Take it as an advantage and a chance to lovingly teach someone a new point of view. Even those who are closed-minded may have a point that you can learn from as well.

We all have diverse views and ideas.​Opened minded people know how to handle these behaviors. They are also open in their convictions that not everyone thinks the same. This doesn’t mean you have to tolerate abuse, nasty behaviors, or disrespect. It just means you don’t have to accept every judgment and criticism. We learn from each other. We don’t have to participate in every argument to make a point.

8 Ways To Compassionately Support Someone With Depression

​Depression is an incredibly difficult thing for a person to go through. Feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, sadness, anxiety, emptiness, loss of interest, and even physical aches and pains like headaches and cramps, are a constant reminder for someone with depression that they are afflicted.​If someone that you love has been diagnosed with depression, you may indeed be feeling some of these things yourself. Please understand that it is important for you to be there for your loved one, and that they need your support.

#1: Research and understand what depression isThis is very important; as it helps you understand what the body and mind actually experience during depression.

For example, many people do not know that there are at least nine major classes of depression. These classes all have various symptoms and some have different treatment measures.

Understanding depression, depression types, and treatment options will put you in a better position to understand the illness. With this understanding, you are far less likely to criticize, judge, or otherwise offend the person.

#2: Be there for themAfter understanding the illness, you should be there for them. Be aware that your loved one’s mood may be not so good, and that they may also feel tired or irritable. It’s important not to take this personally, as these are just byproducts of the illness.

Again, be there for support – not for tough love, giving advice, or other ulterior motives.

Your presence is the most important thing here.

#3: Show them the good things in their lives​Here, don’t tell them how they should feel – like that they should be grateful, positive, enthusiastic, etc. Simply tell them they are loved or cared for, and that people are thinking about them.

If you are not a particularly emotional person – that’s okay! Simply send them a text message or send them a letter or card, or post to their Facebook page.

#4: Release judgementThis is very important and needs to be completely understood. Most people with depression are already ashamed and feel weakened; criticising or judging them makes an unfortunate situation even worse, and could possibly isolate you from your loved one.

Judging and criticising a chemical-based illness is pointless and potentially very damaging to the afflicted and the relationship. Remember, depression is not a personality flaw; it is a medical illness with years of scientific research.

Contrary to popular belief, they don’t pity themselves and many of them are strong people.

#5: Be gentle with yourselfWhen a very close family member or friend is going through depression, it can be very difficult to come to terms with the fact that there is only so much that one can do.

Depression is a battle, and it can be a very long one. In the heat of this battle, you are certainly going to feel helpless and perplexed at times. Remember, you can equip and support the troops as much as possible, but they are the ones that fight.

You cannot solve this problem or heal them of this disorder – this is for the doctor or the therapist to do. The best thing you can do is show unconditional love and support while lending a helping hand.

#6: Take care of yourself, tooHelping someone as they battle depression can be exhausting and trying, both mentally and physically.If you are in a weakened or stressed state, how effective will you be for your loved one?

You should make sure that your own needs are being met and that you are taking care of yourself too. Make sure that you are getting ample sleep, good nutrition, and getting in some fun time for yourself.

#7: Encourage treatmentSome people with depression don’t even realize that they have it, much less seek any kind of treatment. Often, those that are affected often feel ashamed to admit that they are. Some feel that the ailment can be overcome with just willpower or with time.

The truth is that it’s rare for people to get better without some type of treatment. This can be through a doctor/counselor, nutrition therapy, positive inspiration, or a combination of all.

With your knowledge of depression, you are well equipped to recognise the signs and symptoms of depression. Further, you are able to encourage them and discuss their options for treatment.

#8:Educate themHere are some things that you can do to help…– Discuss with the person what you’ve noticed and your concerns.– Explain that you are more than willing to lend an ear if they want or need to talk.– Explain that depression is a medical condition, caused by chemical imbalances in the brain. It is not a sign of weakness or some kind of character flaw, and usually gets better with treatment.– Discuss the various treatment types, including counseling.– Offer to help set up and get them ready to take the next positive step.

Depression is a serious condition and needs to be treated ASAP. If your loved one is opposing treatment or shows troubling signs or behaviors, you should contact a doctor or other mental health professional for advice.

​By compassionately supporting someone with depression you are better equipped to help your loved one through this difficult time. You may even save their life.