What I have Learned in 16 years of Marriage.

October 10, 1998I had no idea what marriage was. But I am thankful forMy Cowboy. I wouldn’t trade this day for anything.

My Cowboy and I, 16 years later. I am blessed.

Today, October 10 is a good day for me. Why? On this day 16 years ago I became a wife. Here is 16 things that I have learned from being married to my cowboy for 16 years.

1. We must forgive each other over and over and over and over if we want to have peace and joy.If we really want to love we mush learn how to forgive. ~Mother Theresa2. Nobody is perfect. So I can not expect my cowboy to be. We all make mistakes and we all have flaws. The most important is that we overlook the mistakes and the flaws and find the good.

3. Marriage has challenged me more than anything else in my life. It has shown me many of my weaknesses and spiritual short comings. Being married has brought me closer to God. Being married has brought me to my knees.

4. You have to do the harder things. It is pretty easy to criticize and nag but it takes effort to encourage and build up.

5. I have learned that we reap what we sow. This has taken some time to see clearly but when I think that our marriage flower isn’t very good, I simply need to water mine a little bit more.

6. I have learned that I am hard to be married to. I know that I have things that are annoying and have blind-spots.

7. I have learned that my husband needs attention. He needs to have quiet time. He needs hugs. He needs to have “Talks.” He need to hear “I love you” everyday.

8. I have learned that marriage is a team effort. We both have to try in order for us to “Win.”

9. Reading the book called “The 5 Love Languages” has really helped our marriage. Not only has this book help our marriage but it also makes you a better friend.

10. Giving My Cowboy respect changes the way my husband sees me. Submission is like a muscle..The more I practice, the stronger and easier it becomes.

11. It is so important to have “bedroom time.” Yep that is what I said. Put the kids to bed. Lock the doors. Pull the covers over and pretend like it is your wedding night!!!

12. I have learned that I am a student learning and growing as a wife. It is important for me to be a better wife than I was yesterday.

13. Being married to a cowboy is hard work and can be a bumpy road. There are times of the year that test our marriage. For example, calving. Long hours and no sleep. But I know if I have God’s guidance and my cowboys hand- we will go for many more years.

14. I have learned that my cowboy doesn’t always show his love by his words or affection but often it’s through his faithfulness, his hard work on the ranch, taking the kids for a day so that I can have some quiet time.

15. It is important to have “Date Nights.” I know what you are thinking, “How can you have date night when life is so busy?” Well I have learned in 16 years that date nights include sitting together after the kids are in bed talking or taking a drive to feed the cows or a horseback ride to gather up for preconditioning or maybe checking water together. Or maybe it is a date night in town. I encourage “Date Nights.”

16. I have learned in 16 years of marriage that it is so important to talk. Communication is so important. I have learned the hard way but now I know that it is better to talk than to hold it all in.

So to My Cowboy on this tenth day of October:

Happy Anniversary!! Thank you for 16 years of love, for your faithfulness through all the ups and downs. Thank you for trusting me. Thank you for your leadership and your heart. Thank you for giving me four beautiful children. Thank you lifting me up when I am down. Thank you for picking me to be your wife. Thank you for all your hard work. I truly love you more everyday and can not wait for the next 16 years.