tropical enlightenment between sessions

Seriously CNN​, need help with your Hawai’i posts? Making it seem like Hawai’i has suddenly been inundated with earthquakes – for shame!

All the g-d fearers are freakin’ – first same-sex marriage and now this!

94 Earthquakes in the past 2 weeks..the last one was a 5.2 magnitude,,,,,(blank stare O_o)…Don’t have to tell me twice, the Lord is NEAR…Lord my God!!!

You’re going to give them a heart attack and they’re going to blame it on Satan poor tings! (No, it’s jus Pele.)

Don’t worry kids, Hawai’i Island is “beset” with earthquakes every single day, all day long, 3536 in the past year!!!! (Ohhh, I’m coming for you Jesus!!!!) Sure the numbers fluctuate, sometimes the come in “swarms”, and most are well under 5.0. If you ever have a chance to go up to Volcanos National Park you can even watch the seismograph that never seems to end. Hello life next to one of the most active volcano’s in the world! (Psst, sweet purple potAto, sweet purple potahto, but locals call it Volcano Village, not Volcano City).

Oh heck while we’re at it, let’s just jump ahead and get next December’s shocker headline out of the way: SNOW IN HAWAI’I! Yes, every single year….

Every surfer has experienced it. Arriving at the beach, seeing the waves going off, getting stoked, suited up and ready to go, only to discover you forgot something kinda important: board shorts, bikini, leash… something. The other day I forgot to replace the leash string on my board. The waves were wind swell chop with a ton of current, so I couldn’t go without a leash. And since I only had time for a quickie jump-in-the-ocean-to-cool-off sesh, I didn’t have time to hike back to the car to figure out other options. Luckily it was an east shore spot which, in Hawai’i at least, usually (sadly) means there is no shortage of beach trash that oft makes its way from Asia. Reduce reuse recycle. Thus, my jimmy rigged string (with back up wire) seen below — hey, it worked!

Before you call us pussies, let me explain. In Hawai’i, most houses are semi-contained. Many places here have either no windows or some windows, and the rest is screened in. There’s no heat, and rarely air conditioning. So whatever the temperature is outside, is what the temperature is inside.

So while the rest of the world would have their thermostats moderating something around 65°, we’re getting nice moist chilled air swooping off the mountains below 50° nighttime through the early morning.

The past few days I’ve had to resort to toaster hand warming, running the oven and opening the door, using the still-hot saucepan (after making rice) on my belly and bones, hot showers, foot soaks, jogging in place, ThermaCare neck warmers taped on the back, wool socks and hoodies, and even stuffing my Malamute / Chow Chow under the covers, to no avail. In a few hours I’ll be in shorts and a t-shirt, and the rest of the freezing world will be jealous, but until then….

While we’re on the topic, every year on weather modification sites you will see posts about snow here. To be clear, before there were airplanes, there’s been snow on the tops of Mauna Kea and Mauna Loa. That doesn’t discount “geoengineering” by any means, nor does it discount the fact that even those not living near the tops of volcanos are shivering.

I might even have to bust out my long sleeve 2mil wet suit top today for our current brisk ocean temp of 75.7 – what, don’t laugh!

Step right up! Try your luck! No, that’s not carnie cant, it’s TEPCO yakuza-ing in more inexperienced workers with inadequate compensation to risk their lives to perform jobs that will affect all of Japan… and beyond. 1,533 fuels rods are to be removed from Unit 4’s unstable spent fuel pool (no word on how they will remove the damaged rods) – and they’ve already started with some of the 200 unused rods, i.e. a practice run. Considering TEPCO has done little right, even in covering up their blunders, it’s interesting the world is expected to simply watch and wait. Some are asking, is this a set-up for inevitable failure? Others are asking, is it even really happening? (TEPCO had been showing off this pristine fuel pool that we’re supposed to believe is Unit 4, even though it had reportedly been devastated.) If sociopaths, psychopaths, and narcissists ruled the world *ahem*, it might look something like this mess. Anyway, we utilized only a tiny bit of creative license in our artistic rendering: TEPCO’s Criticality Claw Crane Arcade Game. Step right up! Try your luck! Prizes stuffed with radionuclides – everyone’s a winner! File this under #ScaryAssShit

Like this:

While biotech keeps activists distracted, corporate America BFF Prez-Obummer is hoping to fast-track one of those evils with elephantitis, The Trans Pacific Partnership (maybe another New Year’s present!).Wikileaks released the draft text here and stated in their press release: “If instituted, the TPP’s [Intellectual Property] regime would trample over individual rights and free expression, as well as ride roughshod over the intellectual and creative commons. If you read, write, publish, think, listen, dance, sing or invent; if you farm or consume food; if you’re ill now or might one day be ill, the TPP has you in its crosshairs.” Oh, is that all. Nah, The TPP is the just the aperitif to the equally secretive US-EU pact TTIP (Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership). TPP and TTIP will cover more than 60 per cent of global GDP (both pacts exclude China).

We noticed Firsthand Weather call this out on their Facebook page this morning (sorry, NWS, they’re more often right). NOAA’s National Weather Service in Anchorage, Alaska making a plea, hidden between the creative forecast: “Please Pay Us.” Knew something was fishy when they incorporated the word “amalgamating”! (We’ll discuss their old school need for ALL CAPS at another time). Love it! #GovernmentShutdown

No lie, everyone’s affected by the government shutdown. The Hawai’i Surf Collaborative Forecast has been suspended until appropriations have been restored. (It’s moments like these that we’re glad we have forecaster Pat Caldwell’s personal email).

For safety purposes, they will be updating and maintaining the daily Surf Zone updates, Tides & Currents, as well as the National Buoy Center (at least the buoys that still work) – not that tourists ever pay attention to the warnings.