Ballooning guest list and a crazy MOG! HELP!

I come from a big family (22 aunts and uncles, 50-something cousins) and my FI only has 27 people total. When I orginally asked MOG how many people she would be inviting, she told me no more than 30 people.

I asked for a guest list before viewing my reception area to know what numbers I would be looking to use. She came back with 89 people, most whom I had never met and didn’t recognize. My FI and I have been together for 5 years and we’ve met each other’s whole families. Upon further investigation, the people are distant relatives who may or may not come, but will be offended if not invited. There are also acquaintances from a club she is in that meets monthly, the neighbors she does not really talk with, and “friends” my FI and I do not like. My FI is in the military and we want to invite his men and our friends. My max list of 150 guests ballooned to 270 overnight!

How do I not offend these unknown family members and MOG while still having the wedding that I want?!?

Tell her you had planned on 150 and only have the budget for the number. Go through exactly how much each guest costs and why. This worked great when my mum was trying to invite people all over the place. If she wants all those extra guests, then she needs to pay for them. If she doesn’t want to pay for them. Ask her to pick her 30 priority guests of the list and about 10 B-listers to invite if the others RSVP no.

I think the best way to get around it is to divide the guest list into classes of people, so for example, all aunts, uncles, and first cousins get invited but not second cousins, etc. So if your parents aren’t inviting neighbors, club members, what have you, then his side doesn’t either.

As a previous poster suggested, tell her you chose your venue based off the number of people she originally told you and that’s all you can accomodate.