It seems to be so easy to tell others what they are doing wrong, what you wish they would do better and what you need them to do for you…that we overlook the important component of taking the time to let others know what we love and appreciate about them.

Think for a minute about the others that work with you. When was the last time that you shared with one of them a note of gratitude or a word of thanks? As a school principal, there were over a hundred staff members in my building. I often would tell myself that I should stop and write a note to a particular staff member, but my thoughts and intentions were often better than my actions. How could I, as a leader let those I work with know sincerely what it was that I specifically appreciated about them? How could I encourage other staff members to also take a minute to do the same?

One word…one sentence…makes more of an impact than you know. Just as a stone ripples the water when thrown into the lake, our words impact all who hear them. Words fling open the door for others to be encouraged and feel confident or words close the door and bring thoughts of inadequacy and failure. What are the words you hear? What are the words you speak? Let’s open the door and think about the power of our words.

November seems to be the time of the year that we stop and consider all that we are thankful for. Gratitude becomes the word of the month and I believe that it is powerful to look around and ponder the things for which we are grateful! Appreciation and gratitude was going to be the focus of this piece, but life happens and the experiences of the day are dictating a slight re-routing of my thoughts.

A key to the success of any organization or group is relational connectedness. People will work harder for the success of an organization if they believe in the vision and cause that they are working for and if positive relationships exist between the members of the organization.

It really boils down to the fact that you need to know the people with whom you work or lead. As a middle school principal, it was important to me to ensure that each year as new teachers came to our school that they had an opportunity to bond and build relationships with the teachers who had been there over the years. That’s one of the reasons leaders take the time to do those “get to know you” icebreaker activities. To the task driven, it may appear to be a waste of time, but if you have solid activities, relationships will begin to form. As relationships develop, collaboration begins to occur. Someone once said that two heads are stronger than one and collaboration for the betterment of your organization is a positive thing! You may lead in an office setting, a school, a volunteer organization, a church small group or children’s group. Periodically, I will share some of these icebreakers on the blog so that if you are leading any type of group, you will be able to modify and adapt these to work in your situation. I like to call them Interesting Icebreakers…

I once attended a retreat where we sat in rows. At the start of the event, we were asked to find out a few things about the person seated next to us and then introduce them to the group. While the activity was a good way to break the ice, the “row” effect minimized the impact of our bonding together. Making one small change – that of changing the seating arrangement from rows to a circle made all the difference in the activity.

As we sat in a circle, we were able to see the person’s face and their expressions as they spoke. We were better able to get a feel for those in the group because we could make eye contact and smile at them as they shared. Taking the time to connect is critical both in the work environment and in life.