Exactly what it says on the tin.

YSaC, Vol. 353: Tell him about the Twinkie.

Free Nice Desk

Hey all yee in need of a solid free desk. Look no further. It’s 59′ 1/2″ long, 30′ deep, and 28′ 1/2″ tall. Four deep droors (how the heck do you spell this) and solid wood. call xxx-xxx-xxxx or email to come and pick it up. evenings are better, but we can work something out. does not come with the box under it sorry just happened to be in pic.

Hear “yee”, Hear “yee”… This desk is 59 feet long, 30 feet deep, and 28 feet tall. That’s a big desk! I can only think of one thing this desk could possibly be used for. A really big Twinkie:

It’s probably a good thing the box doesn’t come with the desk, honestly. I really don’t need any textbooks the size of Oldsmobiles.

Past that, you have to wonder.. if the poster is aware that “droors” is spelled wrong, why didn’t they look it up? I can only assume they are trying to be cleverly endearing, like a four year old deliberately asking for an “ithed cream.”

Thanks to Belinda for sending this one in. And thanks to drmk for letting me make my YSaC debut… we’ll see if she allows me back, or if this is the moment YSaC jumped the shark.

The measurement of the desk baffles me. they are down to the details to inches. first i thought she might have confuse inches and feet but that does not make sense either. She picked wrong manual or assemble sheet? is that it?

“does not come with the box under it sorry just happened to be in pic.” This makes it sound like the photograph wasn’t taken specifically for the ad; the poster just happened to have it lying around (“Still Life With Desk and Box”). Which isn’t impossible, I guess; people have all kinds of reasons for taking pictures of things. But it still strikes me as funny.

Just so you know, I work as a writing tutor and a student wants me to check over their paper I have to explain to them that if the word is underlined in red, it means that it’s spelled wrong. Even after that the don’t know to click on it to get a suggestion. Not all students, mind you, but just enough to figure that someone like this guy might not know how to check their own spelling in the futuristic computerized society.

Because there’s eleventy billion people in the world named Dan, and only two with my name. (Okay, that last may be a little bit of an exaggeration. There might be three — there’s unconfirmed rumors of a sighting in Micronesia.)

drmk = Doramarykate. –Or have I said too much?? I must have said too much. What I meant to say was drumkit. No — dreemkatcher. . NO! Droormaker! Don’t worry, Xelda, your secret’s safe with me in Micronesia.

But those wood particles are glued right together to form SOLID wood, you know?

Actually there’s a desk/workstation type thing sitting in the back room of my house right now that I think might have the dimensions given in this ad. I despair of ever finding a decent place to put it where it’s not blocking a door or something.

I feel that the “does not come with the box under it sorry just happened to be in pic,” does not imply artistic intentions. “Just happened to be in pic,” is what someone says when their cat leaps into the picture at the last second.
So, when the box “just happens” to be there, it implies that the photographer was powerless to prevent the box’s presence. It is immovable, inevitable, and unpredictable.
Watch out for those photobombing boxes!!

A large SUV will fit into a volume of 8′ x 18′ x 6′; or 864 cf.
Ergo, the supposed desk is 24 1/3 “Suburbans” in volume.

28′ tall is three residential 8′ tall stories including the structure for the floors. So, this desk as apartment house would be 1770sf per floor, a total of 5310 gross square feet. Call that three 1100sf(rentable net) apartments at a cheap $1.48/sf (no utilities), is a gross income of $4917 per month. A tidy sum to be given away for free.

Let’s call this single-family house, instead, so, that would be 2-2.5 floors for 3500-3750sf. Built for $210/sf, that desk represents a $750,000 McMansion. (Presuming a 80′ x 90′ lot might be acquired for a mere $75K–tough to do in some cities.)

Hmm, let’s take 21,066cf, and presume it to be 82% empty volume. That gives us 3792cf of “solid” material. If it were willow or poplar at 26#/cf, that’s a piddling 39,592# not quite twenty tons. If this,as Lola wisely suspects, laminate on particle board, that’s 31#/cf for 117,552# or 59¾ tons.