Picture this*…

The BHMA meeting ended yesterday and I drove across South Florida (imagine hundreds of square miles of farmland) to squeeze in a quick visit with my mom. I had to stop for a conference call at a convenience store just south of Lake Okeechobee, and I ran in for a snack. While I was considering my options, I heard a loud commotion near the front door and my first instinct was to look for another exit just in case. I couldn’t reach one without passing through the area of the disturbance, so Plan B was to go into the walk-in beer cooler if necessary.

The cause of the commotion was door-related. As the photos show, there was a sign directly in front of the RHR door. On the inside, there was a rack of sunglasses in front of the same door. A lady in a traditional African dress standing outside of the store had pulled the blocked door open despite the barrier, and you may notice from the photos that something is missing – the top pivot.

When the lady pulled the door, it tipped and landed in front of the LHR door, preventing that door from opening. As this was happening, 3 men who had arrived in a truck from one of the farms were trying to exit. They started debating loudly in Spanish about what to with the door. They moved the rack of sunglasses to try to open the RHR leaf, while the lady in the African dress kept pulling the teetering door.

Meanwhile, the owner of the store ran to the door yelling in Hindi, very angry that the lady and the 3 men had disrupted his system of blocking the defective leaf. They were all shouting in 3 different languages but luckily I speak the international language of broken doors – eventually the door, sign, and sunglasses were back in place, the lady was in, the 3 men were out, the owner was calm, and I had my snack. Sadly, I later realized the snack was 2 months past its expiration date.

I REALLY want to swing by on my next trip and see if this shoulda-Fixed-it Friday door is still dangling by its bottom pivot. If you’re in the neighborhood, there’s a guaranteed continuous hinge sale waiting for you. 🙂

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*If reading the words “picture this” reminded you of my old friend Waller Elliott (a long-time member of the New England Chapter of DHI who wrote specs into his 90’s)…me too. Maybe he was watching over me at the convenience store to make sure I wasn’t crushed.

Several years back one of the SSCs asked Carl Dean if he could put on a one-hour class in door repair. He took out a pen and paper and wrote “PLEASE USE OTHER DOOR”, held up the sign and said “This is about all we’ll be able to cover in an hour.” Sounds like that might have been a good class.

Funny guy and he nailed the response “Please use other door.” Difficult to teach as there are so many variables. Installing hardware for some time is quite helpful, as one learns function of so many different pieces of hardware, all of which one encounters when doing repairs.

Eric: I think that’s a slight optical illusion of the photo. I think that bollard (though it’s purpose is unclear to me) is actually almost touching the front passenger side of the car, and is way out of the opening of either door.