Okay. If you’re trying to eat healthily and eliminate fat and calories from your diet, I wouldn’t be a friend if I didn’t tell you right now to RUN. Run FAR AWAY from this recipe. It’s almost ridiculous in its blatant disregard for the rules of even remotely healthy eating, I tried to get embarrassed about posting it. But I couldn’t. And the reason I couldn’t is that I wouldn’t be a friend if I didn’t share its deliciousness with you; it’s really that good. So I’m conflicted, is what I’m saying. Conflicted, confused, and jiggly.

If I could throw out one of those three attributes, I’d get rid of jiggly. What about you?

This is an elegant potato dish that I make on special occasions, adding different combinations of herbs and seasonings to complement the rest of the meal. I’m posting it under “Holiday Food” today because it’s perfect on your Thanksgiving table for folks who might prefer an alternative to mashed potatoes, OR for Christmas dinner, where the main course is roast beef…or prime rib…or HAMBURGERS, for all I care. Just make sure you have these potatoes on the side.

They’ll make you really jiggly. I’ll let you decide whether that’s a good thing or not.

The Cast of Characters: russet potatoes, onion, cream cheese, heavy cream, milk, butter, salt, pepper, herbs, and parmesan cheese. And LOOK! The sun’s coming through the window, which means these photos will be a real challenge. I’ll talk about that soon in PW Photography.

The great thing about this dish is, you can use whatever herbs are seasonal, or whatever herbs the horses haven’t yet eaten from your garden. I decided on parsley, which is kind of a no-brainer for this type of dish; rosemary, which is my favorite herb ever; chives, which pack a flavor punch beyond measure; and SAGE. I’ll use the sage in small quantities since it can really overpower, but I thought it would give a nice Thanksgiving-y flavor to the dish.

And note: I have not intentionally set out to completely turn my back on the green can Parmesan stuff forever. It’s just that I’ve had this huge block of the real stuff in my fridge for months, and I can’t not use it. It would be rude.

Begin by dicing a small white onion really finely. Here. I’ll show you how to do it.

Cut the onion in half from root to tip, then cut each half in half again. Peel off the outer papery layer, then make very small vertical slices across the onion.

Then rotate the onion 90 degrees and slice downward to create a fine dice.

This is a mandoline. I’m going to use it to slice my potatoes, but you don’t really have to have one. You do, however, need a pretty good, sharp knife. We need the potato slices to be really, really thin.

If you do use a mandoline, keep this in mind: it’s the most dangerous kitchen tool there is. They’re as sharp as all get-out, yes…but the downward, back-and-forth motion with which you slice the food lends itself well to one’s hand slipping and hitting the blade square on.

Usually, I’ll wrap a dish towel around my hand and grasp the potato through the towel. That way, if I slip or get too close to the blade, the towel will buy me a little room for error.

But not much. The blade is razor sharp.

Here’s what the potatoes should look like. I’ve done it with a sharp knife before…no problem. It just takes a little more time.

Next, in a large skillet, melt 1 stick butter over medium-low heat.

When it’s melted, throw in the diced onions. Stir around and allow them to cook over medium-low heat, about 3 minutes.

Reduce heat to low, then slice up the cream cheese and add it to the skillet.

I’m sorry, okay? But I have to be me. And ME likes cream cheese.

Stir around until cream cheese melts into the butter and onions.

The mixture will be pretty dadgum thick.

And that’s where the CREAM comes in!

I’m sorry, but I have to be me.

But look—MILK! It negates all of my sins.
Milk covers a multitude of sins. Sister Agatha Mary Margaret said that to me once.

And I’ve chosen to believe it through the years.

Stir the mixture together, and don’t taste it or you’ll be toast. It is SO good.

Now, add in some salt. And remember: you’re salting not just for the sauce, but for all those potatoes you just sliced. In my experience with this dish, it’s very easy to UNDERsalt it, which is never good. So really salt away, and if you think the sauce tastes adequately salty, salt it some more.

You’ll just have to trust me on this one.

Next, add plenty of finely ground black pepper. If you want to use the black dust in the red and white can, you’ll hear no judgment from me.

Really, there’s not much you could do to warrant judgment from me. I love you. I love her. I love him. I love everyone. And whatever any of you does is fine. Love, Miss Tolerant and Permissive.

Now chop all the herbs pretty finely and add them to the skillet. Here’s the rosemary. There’s probably a teaspoon here.

And here are the chives. Oh, how I love fresh chives. Like, totally.

Here’s the fresh parsley…

And finally, the sage. I used about 1/3 the amount as the other stuff.

Stir the mixture together, then do me one small favor: take a whiff. Take a nice, long whiff.

Then pick yourself up off the floor. I know it’s hard, but you’ll be glad you did.

Turn off the heat, then taste the sauce for seasonings. Remember: you’re saltin’ for two here.

Now, generously butter a baking dish.

Throw in the sliced potatoes.

Then carefully pour the creamy, sinful mixture over the top.

Okay, now I’m really embarrassed.

No, not at the cream. Not at the butter. Not at the cream cheese, either. I’m embarrassed at the quality of the photo. What happened? Did I cough? Hiccup? Convulse? It’s off center, and the light from the window is messing everything up.

It’s WRONG now, it’s just all WRONG now!

But we’ll talk about that in PW Photography.

Finally, just grate some Parmesan and sprinkle it over the top.

Now pop it into the oven and bake it for 45 minutes or so, until it’s really bubbly and hot and…bubbly.

I didn’t get a photo of the finished potatoes inside the pan, because I’m scatterbrained and I plum forgot. I was thinking about thumthin’ elth.

423 Comments

This is the most over-the-top potato gratin recipe I’ve ever seen! My husband makes over-the-top potato gratin with every cheese under the sun that everyone loves, but he left out the CREAM CHEESE! I will show him this recipe right away! (You notice that I didn’t say I was going to cook this – I’ve got it MADE out here in Connecticut, let me tell you!)

Randi Snow On Friday, October 17 at 9:21 am

I think I could eat this dish for every meal for the rest of my life. Of course, my life would probably be cut short what with all the cream and cheese and more cream. BUT, it looks absolutely fantastic and I will be making it. Soon.
Oh, and your “bad” potato picture? Better than my best picture any day of the week.

205

Benita On Friday, October 17 at 9:26 am

I would make it the main dish by adding Slices of summer sausage, some green peppers and some cream of mushroom soup. YUM.

206

Marlies On Friday, October 17 at 9:26 am

I would have responded earlier, but I had to let the drool dry from my keyboard before I could type again…. why oh why did I marry a lactose intolerant man!

Those look scrumptious. So now I have decided that I will NOT tell my cardiologist about this site. She would have me hanging by my thumbs if she saw me even thinking about making this. She thinks all I should eat are nuts and berries and tree bark and really ucky stuff with NO salt and NO dairy and NO taste.

Dang, that looks too good to be true. It will make its way to my table soon.

209

AW On Friday, October 17 at 9:34 am

It looks wonderful and it would make me so SICK. I’m going to make it anyway, rest assured. I’ll only get a taste once it hits the table anyway, right? If my brother gets ahold of the dish ain’t nobody else getting any of it. Au gratin potatoes of any type are his crack. He’ll love this.

Emily On Friday, October 17 at 9:54 am

Ashley On Friday, October 17 at 10:04 am

Yum. My oldest son just discovered the boxed au gratin potatoes, which he loves. I’ve been to lazy to look up how to cook ‘em without the powdered stuff and dried potatoes – now I have this! I bet he’ll love it! A little sharp cheddar on there…

I hope you don’t mind that I’ve given my doctor your contact information. She asked why my cholesterol was so high and when I said P-Dub, she looked at me funny. So I directed her to the cooking portion of the show.

She’s a cute little Asian lady, so when she calls yelling at you, you’ll know who sent her.

Cal Gal On Friday, October 17 at 10:10 am

Oh my heavens! I just printed this recipe. We are working on recipes for my in laws visit for Thanksgiving. They are either going to hate me or love me. But then again, I don’t have worry about that, I got their baby boy to finally marry, I can do no wrong…heehee!

222

Lael On Friday, October 17 at 10:29 am

Seriously, the first thing I did when I saw the title and picture of this post was go “Oooooahh” with an always starving pregnant woman’s stomach doing the talking. I don’t think I can look at the pictures without drooling…seriously Ree- I’m not supposed to gain a lot more weight! Oh well, guess I’ll be fattening up my baby!

223

MK On Friday, October 17 at 10:29 am

Oh my gosh! Those look devine! I’ve been cooking a lot of potatoes lately, I’m not sure why. I have got to try those. I have to ask about the curvy woman’s silhouette in your kitchen…does she have a story?

224

Jenny C. On Friday, October 17 at 10:30 am

That looks delicious but I am a strong believer that anything containing cream cheese IS delicious.

I once sliced my finger real good on a mandoline when trying to multi-task: slicing potatoes and arguing with the fiance. Needless to say, I will never multi-task around sharp things ever again.

225

Dalnapen On Friday, October 17 at 10:31 am

…another English major weighing in on PW’s written recipe–’bubbly’ probably instead of ‘bubby’.

Those recipes–keep ‘em coming, PW!

j

226

Alicia W. On Friday, October 17 at 10:32 am

These look a lot like my MIL’s scalloped potatoes, which are essential to any meal involving meatloaf. I may just have to give these a try…they look really awesome! As a side note, my sister totally sliced her hand on a kitchen tool similar to a mandoline, so you do have to be really careful of them.

Shay On Friday, October 17 at 10:34 am

Vicki Miller On Friday, October 17 at 10:37 am

Oh my I will try these SOON!!!!!!!

230

Kasey On Friday, October 17 at 10:39 am

My pinky finger has also met the mandolin blade. It was NOT pretty. USE the guard if you have one!! Trust me. Of course, I was stupidly trying to slice a carrot in the stupid thing.
Those potatoes look like Heaven on a plate. Please bring me some. Potatoes and cheese together are the best combination ever created.

Rebecca On Friday, October 17 at 10:55 am

Beth On Friday, October 17 at 10:56 am

I have cut myself using a mandolin several times. They are sharp! This looks very yummy!

239

Nikki H On Friday, October 17 at 11:09 am

I like that name up there–”Heaven on a Plate”. I think you should name it that. Or maybe just “Potatoes on My Thighs”.

240

Natalie in TX On Friday, October 17 at 11:11 am

Well, if you want to know what I think of this recipe, you need to read comment #365 for the previous post about Sushi. Apparently these potatoes made my brain melt and I accidentally posted my thoughts on this recipe under the wrong section. Oops! ha ha ha ha

I suppose I can’t really argue that this dish is HEALTHY (though that would be nice). But, I’ve got to say, cooking with real ingredients — real cream, real butter — sure beats the alternatives. And your body thanks you

244

cecelia On Friday, October 17 at 11:24 am

Wheeooo – hubba hubba – fabulous and delicious. I don’t know if I dare. However, if I have people in to dinner, THEN I could. The invite would be a perfect excuse. Here comes the party.

I have been waiting for you to post a veggie dish that would equal the Mt Dew Apple Dumplings….you now did…totally yum…call my boss for me and give me a good excuse to leave work right now, so I can go home and cook me some of these!

P Widdy…that was halarious!

Marlene

249

Melissa On Friday, October 17 at 11:48 am

My jeans just got 2 sizes too small reading and drooling over this recipe. I will gain weight just thinking about this dish and when I do make it my husband will eat most of it and not even need to loosen his belt. Why is that?

250

lucky On Friday, October 17 at 11:50 am

Oh crap. I feel my butt getting bigger just reading the recipe. As the size of my rear will prove, my love for carbs, potatoes in particular, hugely outweigh my desire to be skinny. Sigh. I know, it is a problem… I am making these in about an hour. And I won’t be sharing. Oh, look! there, it just got bigger again.

252

kristy with a K On Friday, October 17 at 11:56 am

Oh holy Mary mother of buddha, those look even more decadent than cream-braised brussel sprouts. And now I’m thinking of a way to combine brussels and potatoes in this delectable looking dish. You can bet your sweet fanny I’ll be trying this one out, because you can’t keep me away from heavy fats and potatoes. Thanks for sharing!

254

Peachy On Friday, October 17 at 12:01 pm

Geeeeze……I think my monitor and I both just gained 10lbs!

255

Julie On Friday, October 17 at 12:11 pm

I am so using this recipe this weekend! Thanks so much!

Is that “salting for 2″ a double entente?

256

Tara On Friday, October 17 at 12:19 pm

Now that I know what I’ll be having for a side dish this Sunday, I have to look through the site for a main dish. I already know dessert. We just love love love that bread pudding. Yum! Thank you Ree. You rock!

I don’t know if someone else has written to you already, but I just wanted to point out that there are excellent mandolins on the market that come with grippers to guard your hand against the sharp blade.

My gripper is made of plastic with five sharp teeth that grip the potato / zucchini / onion / whatever.

You might be able to buy just the gripper at a kitchen store.

I highly recommend it.

259

Calvin's Mom On Friday, October 17 at 12:57 pm

I’m going to try these tonight with my son. Anyone out there who has a kid with a learning disability, Ree’s step by step instructions and photos are WONDERFUL because they are concrete examples of how to cook the food. ESPECIALLY THE DICED ONION. He has now followed 3 recipes thanks to Ree! He might learn to cook yet!!!

260

Karen On Friday, October 17 at 1:02 pm

okay, here I am at work and lunchtime isn’t even close. UNFAIR! But, I was looking at the pictures and everyone stated asking me to print it out for them. See what you started. But, I am going to make them this week-end, because I can’t wait.

mel brand On Friday, October 17 at 1:15 pm

Okay, I sat down to eat my healthy lunch of whole wheat pasta and roasted veggies, which is really quite tasty, mind you. And then I decided to check on my friend, pioneer woman. I have to tell you I clicked on that cooking section, and I just groaned, “oohh nooo!” Potatoes are really my favorite food in the whole wide world, and these look absolutely to die for. You’re really mean, you know that – just plain mean. I’m much jigglier than you. Sigh. Back to my whole wheat pasta. But I have a feeling these will find a way to my holiday table.

I made this dish for one of my son’s potlucks dinner on Saturday. It looks yummy!!!!! Butttttttt I was stupid, dumb, not paying attention, old…..I took off quite a bit of my skin on my finger. Can we say lots of blood!!!!!! I have the plastic thing but was in a hurry…not to worry I am a tough ole cookie…I wrapped it with paper towels and continued making it! I did take out the skin from my finger…no one wants to eat that, or not? I have to work tonight so will make up a dramatic story……..

Pat On Friday, October 17 at 2:13 pm

I really really want to know if while pouring one bowl of luciousness into another pot pan or dish, and taking a picture with your other hand…have you ever dropped the bowl into the dish and made a HUGE mess?? Cause I have…minus the camera in the other…lol.

Oh and this looks TOO good

277

Sheri On Friday, October 17 at 2:41 pm

Holy Mary, but those look Great!! I am going to try them this weekend with smothered ham. My boys won’t eat cheese, so maybe with none of the telltale yellow or stringyness they will try this. you’d think an 18 yr old and a 13 yr old would be more adventerous! Thanks P-Widdy! Keep the great recipes coming. Can’t wait for the cookbook.

Cindy On Friday, October 17 at 3:31 pm

Sweet baby Jesus on a stick….of butter…..this may just be my favorite recipe, so far, that you have posted (today)

I can not wait to try this and I plan on doing it this weekend when there is no one at my house but me to..ummm…test it out! Thanks for the extra 5 pounds that will soon be applied to my backside.

285

catherine On Friday, October 17 at 3:45 pm

******REQUEST******* could you mention where you get your cute dishes? The dish is part of the presentation and I want to know where all the cute dishes come from, like the bowl/pie pan you show off in the Apple Betty recipe, or how about the cute plate in this recipe. It just has to be a sentence at the end of recipes, ie: “green bowl from target, last one in the set.” see, that wouldn’t be so bad, would it?

Sarah On Friday, October 17 at 3:52 pm

Plans changed … fixed the dish for lunch. I used all ½ n ½ for liquid & only used fresh parsley due to an interruption & a “I need you to come now” call! LOL Follow Ree’s advise & use plenty of salt I do easy it up by using the KitchenAid on pulse for the onions, Actually it will do a very thin slice too but i like my mandoline. It was so good & will make again using more herbs next time for a diff taste. Thanks for the recipe.

PW, I’ve never posted to your site before but am a daily reader. Today, there are three things I want to tell you about myself:
#1 – I’m a visual learner so your instructional photographs are right up my alley!
#2 – I love to cook.
#3 – I’m 10 weeks pregnant and craving carbs all the time.

Needless to say, this dish is in my oven even as I type this. I love, love, love your site and I can only hope your cookbook is just as visually satisfying. Thank you!

zainab On Friday, October 17 at 5:04 pm

I am in love with this recipe already! It just so happens that I do the SAME thing, but instead of potatoes, I use spinach. With spinach, its a family favorite, and being the carb loving family that we are, I can’t wait to try it with potatoes!
Thanks for tempting us!

Wow, this looks scrumptious! My family will love these. Thanks for the recipe.
Tammy

300

Janet Stewart On Friday, October 17 at 5:21 pm

As #22 & #29 say (I didn’t read any further but I KNOW there’ll be more), that mandoline is TERRIBLY DANGEROUS!!!!!!!! I too cut off the very tip of my finger with one once cuz I was too smug to use the safety holder.
Ree, we would hate for you to cut those talented hands. But I am definitely making those potatoes!!!!! Why russet?
Any reason? I usually like Yukon Gold for something like this but you are the authority so just wondering. Love XXX
Janet

Saturday, April 4: Freezer Fundamentals! While ranch work is going on outside, freezer work is going on inside! I share four more of my favorite freezer basics, which can be made into a whole bunch of different meals.