22 July 2007

Quite times in the dead of the hockey drought that is summer. Not much going on (unless you count the Nashville drama with a certain Canadian billionare that Pens fans are familiar with. Don't let him get you down, Nashville!), and the Pens are all out on the beach or on the indoor rinks. Personally, I hope they're on the beach with a friend and a good book. Summertime is for relaxing, and as long as you do some practice, you might as well play. Besides, training camp is coming up soon, and rumor has it that the boys are going back to West Point. Think they'll have this much fun again?

Speaking of breaks, NPI is rather quiet right now, and I'm sure you can all guess why.That's right, Mr.Potter has taken us hostage, and although my adventures with him lasted 23 hours, Steph has to go at a slower pace due to the fact her roommate wants his copy back at the end of the day.

After finishing the book, I think I can sum it up nicely by saying that it's like the last 10 years of the Penguins history, topping off with a Cup win. It is not like the Oilers' last season, which Steph said she was glad of, since it would mean that the book ended with the death and destruction of everyone and everything.

So, how do I compare the two? Well, let's go at this systematically:

-Sidney Crosby, dark haired, marked for greatness at the tender age of 13 (right around when Harry went to school at 11), works great magic with a stick. Now if we can just get him to get a scar on his forehead, it would work.

-If Colby Armstrong had bright red hair...

-Instead of foisting poor Geno into the role of a bushy-haired girl, I'm going to say that he instead resembles a certain Bulgarian seeker. Quiet, kind, speaks with heavily accented English (rather sexy in the movie)?

-Malfoy = The New York Rangers.

-Actually, no no, Malfoy = the Philadelphia Flyers. Snarky and inept, but with some good looks (Lupul, I'm talking about your baby blues, here....and your lack of stickhandling, come to think of it), but that you hate on principle because they're just so good to hate.

-The Death Eaters = The New York Rangers.

I can see it now...Sidney Potter, alone, finding himself at the School of National Hockey, famous before he steps foot on the State-side ice for powers he doesn't know the extent of. Sorted by the Magical Drafting Hat into the Penguins House (located in the tower of Pittsburgh), and taken under the kindly wing of Lemieuxdore as he steers his path from afar with kindly words and well-timed advice. Along with his two best friends, Colby Weasley and Malkin Krum, the prodigy from Eastern Europe, they are lead through the trials and tribulations of learning the skills of hockey from their head, McTherrien (sounds like a terrier breed). Hijinks abound as Sidney faces alienation from other Houses, jealous of his skill, and his acceptance into a new world with the help of other friends, such as Maxime Flannigan and Jordan Thomas. (I was really seeing Eric and Jordan Patil, but I didn't want to contemplate who would wear ornamental butterflies in their hair) Many adventures follow the trio as they work through their years, competing with the other groups, facing friends, family, and culminating to a faceoff with an old nemesis, one that trained with Lemieuxdore in his younger days, learning from his skate-lacings...He-Who-Must-Be-Booed.

As with most of their meetings, Sidney comes off victorious, leaving his opponent to scratch his mark, #68, into the locker room door as he leaves. Lemieuxdore has left the terrible task of defeating He-Who-Must-Be-Booed once and for all (before he retires, anyhow) to young Sidney Potter and the Dark Captain's minion, Sean Lestrange? Can he do it? Will he live up to the task set before him? Will the Penguin House win the Cup this year? Only time will surely tell.

And now, back to your scheduled waiting for the preseason.

(for the record, I do like Jagr, the parallel just fit too well to pass up. Sorry, Jaromir!)

(And I really do like him! Sure, I wanted to kick his teeth in when he left us for some other Eastern team, and he can be a bit of a prat sometimes, but he did pick up the Pens and lead them when Mario left, and you just can't ignore all those years of ass kicking. ;)

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