"Pursue, keep up with, circle round and round your life, as dog does his master's chaise. Do what you love. Know your own bone, gnaw at it, bring it, unearth it, and gnaw it still." --Henry David Thoreau

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Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Be my dick?

I was watching Mighty Aphrodite just now, and I was thinking of how much I love Woody Allen. From Annie Hall to Bullets Over Broadway to Anything Else, he really does it for me (and it's not just because i love the Jews).

This made me think of other things I love in people and particularly, the darling dicks in my life…so I composed a list a la Sound of Music as these are my favorite things…in people:Friends and/or Lovers:

Loyal to the point of absurdityAlways ready for a rowdy timeUnderstanding if rowdy time is not possibleLikes to dance dirty, on top of barsLikes to make friendsAlways up for a drinkUnderstands my madness and embraces its consequencesLoves Woody Allen, PT and Wes Anderson,Embraces stereotypes as an equal opportunity comedic reliefHas no qualms about being a haterWill tell me that yes, I need to lose 10Hates who I hate, loves who I loveIs supportive but realisticLikes drunk karaoke the bestWill sing drunk karaoke in the street…maybe in the eveningCares little for God, common morality or lines people we do not know drawWill dance with me drunkLove pop music no matter the costPrefer beach to all other alternativesPrefers drunk beach to all other alternativesForgives easilyForgets easilyHas that I'll drop anything when you need me attitudeIs enthusiastic about the same shit I am enthusiastic aboutListens to the same shit different day no matter whatWill be there when I am wrinkled without questionLoves strip clubsLoves politics or at least will listen to my moderately educated rantsBelieves me that I mean no harmDoes not play with my dispensation toward a guilty reactionUnderstands that callus means an indifference toward the situation, never the personHas never judged my kissing girls, puking in my own bed, forgetting major parts of the evening, being a bitch for no reason and just giving a good slap on the assThinks my love of Cuba is charming and passion for its music tolerableWon’t mind my rendition of several Prince classicsKnows how to listenWill always speak how they feel no matter the cost (which is zero cost from me)Understands in their very being the value of (or at least my obsession with) Melrose, L Word, Bridget (1 only), Love Actually, Rushmore, West Wing on Bravo, Big Lebowski, Anne of Green Gables I, II, III, Sin City, Little Women (any version), Dangerous Liasons, Pride and Prejudice and every other freaking sweet movie I cannot exist withoutDoesn’t mind how much I love to laugh at whatever decimal level seems appropriateKnows I am loyal to a faultAppreciates my Aquarius tendenciesWill never sell me up a river for some new piece of ass/dick/pussyCan tolerate my need to please and fix EVERYTHINGCan always laugh with me or at me, it doesn’t make a difference as long as I get to laugh, too.

So this post is absurd, I'll grant you, but it is nice for me to reflect on what makes those dicks that I love above all other dicks.