BRUHstrology: How It’s Goin’ Down (Week of 05/20/18)

We decode your horoscope so you don't have to.

BRUHstrology is where the astral plane and corner store meet. With the expert help of astrologer Janelle Belgrave (and our resident BRUHstrologer, Bruce Goodwin II), CASSIUS decodes your horoscope so you don’t have to. Here’s what’s on deck for the week of May 20, 2018.

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Aries

The Astrologer Says:

After an eventful first quarter out on the road, it’s time to head home to recover, Aries. Being home and around the neighborhood will be especially restorative if you’ve been feeling burnt out. Shift your energy down a level as you focus a little less on external plans and achievements. If you’re feeling tapped out, try enlisting your friends to help. Great leaders learn to delegate. The best ones know the value of staycations.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

The first quarter of the year was lit. You’re doing well at work, but you haven’t been invested in your home life. Get back in good with your girl, or she’ll find someone who isn’t afraid to give her their parents’ Hulu password so she can watch Handmaids Tale without you.

Leo

The Astrologer Says:

While you’re in the process of rebranding, Leo, you’ll need to do some research. What does the world need and how will you find a way to fill that need (all while making it look good, naturally)? Connect with your friends to discuss your vision, even if it hasn’t come together just yet. Time spent meditating and visualizing in private will get you closer to fleshing out the vision of your brand. Have fun at your vision board parties.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

The rebrand is strong and necessary. You used to be that guy who indulged in your vices every night of the week, but now you’re saving all the money and in bed by 9 p.m. Now that you’re changing, make sure your friends align with the new you. After that, it’s time to build with the squad.

Sagittarius

The Astrologer Says:

Pay attention, Sadge, because this week people are going to start to notice you. If you’ve been doing homework up ’til now, you’ll have plenty to chat about, too. Passionately speak up for your projects and the dreams you’ve been working towards— you never know who may be listening with the inclination to invest in you. If business isn’t on your mind, make yourself available for extra flirting and loving… or you could just mix business with pleasure. But be responsible, Centaur.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

This is your week, so that means it’s time to dress like it. Prepare to switch it up a bit, dirty vans one day and a fresh-ass pair of Jordan 1s the next. Been debating on rocking jeans with holes in the knees? DO IT. Whatever business has been on your mind, it’s time to put pen to paper… or music to Soundcloud. Whatever floats your boat.

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Taurus

The Astrologer Says:

There’s so much going on that it’s hard to keep track of it all, Taurus. It can be a dizzying affair when your whole life is turning upside down and inside out. Best advice for this week is to talk about what you’re going through with people you trust. Chances are they’ve experienced upheaval themselves and can give some sound advice on how to proceed. Try not to hold in your angst. Otherwise, it may explode at the wrong moments (e.g., while on the job). And be patient. You’ll get used to the new reality in time.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

It’s been a wild couple of week for you, Kanye is falling deeper into the sunken place, but you’re in love with Post Malone AND J. Cole’s new albums. Talk about the confusion going on in your life with the gang-gang, and they’re probably feeling the same way. Just don’t hold it in because then it’ll turn into anger that will come out at the wrong moment. Yelling “Fuck You, Dave” to your coworker who just asked to borrow your pen for the fourth time today isn’t cool. Whisper it instead.

Virgo

The Astrologer Says:

Your efforts are paying off, Virgo, just keep going and remain in “dress to impress” mode. If you’ve wanted to make moves in your career, the energy is all for it this week with an emphasis on you talking up yourself and your talents. This is a networking period for you, so practice your small talk and pitch-making so that you can cash in on the connections you make with friends and potential associates.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

All that hard work you put in this winter is finally paying off. Keep flexing at work and don’t be afraid to be yourself at all times—just remember to remain cool. If you asked for a six-piece mild, don’t hesitate to complain when the dude at the drive-through OBVIOUSLY gave you chicken fingers.

Capricorn

The Astrologer Says:

When you make an effort to have a good time, people take notice and want to join in on the fun—or have fun with you specifically, Capricorn. Whether you’re single, in a complicated situation, or taken, there’s a little more love in the air around your way, so take advantage. Say yes to the invitations to go out. People want to hear about all the mischief you’ve been getting into while you’re out there playing Ferris Bueller. Keep it light for now. You can wow them with your work ethic later.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

You’re happy, and that makes everyone around you happy, so keep it up. Hang out with your friends a bit more this week. There’s also love in the air, so you better not be going home alone after a night out at the bar… unless of course, you have a bae, then get their permission first.

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Gemini

The Astrologer Says:

Happy Birthday, Gemini! On May 21, the Sun returns to your sign for 30 days of busybody activities, so turn up! Hopefully, the restful weekend you just took has recalibrated your internal wiring and helped you feel more focused, because there may be opportunities to make magic happen this week. Focus on what you want to manifest—whether it be money or things you really enjoy—and watch the Universe deliver your request. Just be responsible, Gemini. You can still catch hands during your season.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

Your birthday season has arrived, but remain busy at work and get done what you promised to get done months ago. (We’re talking about you, Kanye. We need that Pusha T album.)

Libra

The Astrologer Says:

You’re breaking out of the worst of your emotional baggage and relationship drama period, Libra—congratulations. All that time spent working on your hang-ups has left some time and space for you to focus on other interests like your career and creative pursuits this week. Make yourself available to people, because you may find that your recent soul-searching experience can be of service to someone who needs the support. There’s no time to be miserable when you’re busy helping someone else.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

You’ve had a tough go at it lately, but you’re finally coming out of your funk. Toxic bae is gone and your coffee guy who you’ve been going to for years is finally getting your order right before you even get to the counter. Keep it up, because your energy is attractive and a healthy relationship is on the horizon. Help your friends and keep your mind busy this week. No regression over here.

Aquarius

The Astrologer Says:

Going into hiding is sometimes exactly what’s needed to get back in touch with ourselves, Aquarius. After reflecting on your fears, you’re coming out on the other side feeling calm, collected and energized to go back outside to play with others. Keep it fun and simple. Get tickets to see your favorite artist, or get into pick-up games at the gym—anything that feels like a good time. You’ll be feeling like your eccentric self in no time.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

Being alone is fire, and you need it right now so get used to it. Once you’re done sulking and finishing every single episode of Narcos, it’s time to shake that shit off and get to it. Go see a concert with the homies. Drake and J. Cole just announced new tours!? What a time to be alive.

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Cancer

The Astrologer Says:

Fall in love with you again, Cancer. After all the fussing and fighting you’ve been through lately, you need to remind yourself that you’re lovable and deserving of good things, too. Treat yo’self. Dress in clothes you like, eat the foods that comfort you and spend time with the people who build you up rather than needlessly stress you out. Things are getting better, I promise. Just keep your head up.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

You deserve love too, bro. Don’t be afraid to ask for it. Be a soft thug for once and find out what your love language is. Don’t be afraid to wear Nike tech suits and eat terrible foods while you’re being a #SadBoy. You’ll get out of your funk and return to your glistening beard greatness soon, King.

Scorpio

The Astrologer Says:

Fall in love with the big picture, Scorpio. You’ve been doing the busy work around landing your message, so now see how it stands up against the ideas of others. The week is for the meeting of the minds and allowing your passionate standpoint to speak for itself. Just try not to get too hot under the collar during debates, because, remember, this is all to expand your mind and perspective. No need to come to blows over anything. It’s not that deep.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

If the ends justify the means, get to it. Those late nights at the office with countless canceled Tinder dates f*cking suck but think bigger. Who needs Tinder dates when all this hard work could lead to a forever bae who greets you in the finest of Savage x Fenty lingerie when you come home on Friday nights? The correct answer is no one. You’ll need it after all the passionate debates you’ll get in this week. (Don’t worry: Biggie, Jay-Z, or Nas are all correct answers when debating about the best MC.)

Pisces

The Astrologer Says:

More playtime is on tap for you this week, Pisces, so take advantage of any creative activities that recharge your batteries. It’s still a bit early in the season, but a few beach or lazy river dates could do wonders for you. While you’re at it, grab your journal and pour whatever crazy mix of to-do lists, wild ideas and tension out of your head so you can function again. Sometimes it’s a good idea to clear out your mind’s palace so you can go back to living there in peace.

The BRUHstrologer Says:

All work and no play makes you a very dull Pisces. Have fun this week. Do what helps you clear your mind so that you can go into next week feeling like your best self. Lazy days are the best days, and you’ve earned a couple.