After ending my relationship of 6 years to my first 'proper' boyfriend due to his infidelity (and a secret love child with one of his employees as I later found out) I was made redundant. Twice. This is my rise from Rock Bottom and the antics along the way.
p.s. I drive a Mini Cooper...
The adventures can be found in my blog posts in the left hand column, start on 19th Oct with "When The S**t Hit The Fan"...

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Wednesday, 12 September 2012

Singapore Bound...

... So I am wiping away tears but they just keep coming. There is only so long I can hang out in a toilet without looking suspect. I wipe away the make up from underneath my eyes and walk to the security gates. Quickly putting my make up into the required clear plastic bags I proceed to queue for the x-ray machines.

The queue is long and I am impatient because I want to escape to another toilet to finish my crying and to prepare myself for a 14 hour flight to Singapore. Finally it is my turn. I heave the ridiculously heavy hand luggage and handbag onto the conveyor belt and take off my coat and shoes to be x-rayed. Beep beep beep. Bloody hell. I get searched. They obviously find nothing. I walk to the other end of the conveyor belt, whilst trying to get my stillettos and fur coat back on and I get asked by a security guard to step to one side. What?

I am standing and waiting. I stand and wait some more. I look incredulously guilty at this point because my face is a mess from the tears and I am wondering why on earth and what on earth I am waiting for.

I get asked to collect my hand luggage, handbag and laptop and proceed into a small side room. WTF? This is ridiculous! I have also watched enough airport security programs to know that this means that they think I am hiding something.

They ask me to empty out my case. I do as is required and then I remember the jar of Branston pickle that I was taking as a present to Colin. Oh that's what it is. I think that they will just let me be on my way, but they insist on me taking my coat and shoes off again and then not only swabbling them but also the inside of my case. If nothing else this commotion has stemmed the tears. I am now just embarrassed. They come across the pen that Miss Handsome had given me and were in stiches of laughter! Eventually they let me leave the room and I wandered through to duty free.

I bought what felt like every magazine on the shelf which in hindsight wasn't my brightest idea. I was already lugging a wheelies suitcase, carrying a laptop bag, my extra large handbag and was wearing around four layers of clothes. Movement from this point on was no mean feat.

I boarded the plane (upper deck) and sat down next to possibly the most boring man I have ever met in my life! I was hoping for a hottie like on the plane to Greece. Wishful thinking. It was about 20 minutes after take off that I fell asleep. And that way I remained for the entire fourteen hours!

Landing in Singapore I gather up all of my things and head out to have a cigarette. I walk out into the tropical garden area and I am swamped by heat. Get the fur coat off my back now! Thing was I couldn't hold it all. Bugger. By the time I had found a space, taken my coat off and found my cigarettes and smoked one, I decided that I may as well smoke a couple more to save me trying to move all my stuff!!

I make my way up to the roof. I had heard how beautiful it was up there and given that as I was coming into land I was speechless to it's beauty. I had heard correct. Wow. It was too soon that I had to make my way back down to the boarding gate to catch my connecting flight. Not before being swabbed again! Bloody hell!... And onwards to Melbourne Tullamarine...

Until Next Time... xx

(The name of this blog is now changing over to reflect the move, but it can still be found at the same address)... xx