American English is a variant of the English language used in the United States of America; this variant itself encompasses several regional dialects, which is not surprising given the size of that country.

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Noah Webster proposed various reforms to English spelling that became characteristic of American English as we know it today. Americans do not waste time writing the extraneous 'u' found in British English. "Center" is the more logical spelling of "centre" (although this causes problems when the letter "e" mysteriously disappears in the word "central") (also this same rule applies to the letter "L", such as the fact the word "little" is not spelled "littel"). "Jail" makes more sense than "gaol". "Organization" seems more reasonable than "organisation" (although this change is not consistent, as certain words such as "compromise" are left unchanged) (although many of the reform rules have various exceptions, such as the word "acre" which would be pronounced differently if it was spelled "acer"). The list goes on.

Although Americans pronounce words differently, there is no such thing as the American language, only American English. This is probably because the British themselves once spoke in much the same way, several hundred years ago. A major example is rhoticity.
The letter Z is also pronounced "zee" instead of "zed", which helps the alphabet song rhyme. British people say it should be pronounced "zed" because it comes from the Greek letter "zeta". For some reason though they don't pronounce the letter "b" like "bed" because it comes from the letter "beta", or pronounce "e" like "ed" because it comes from "eta".

The many regional dialects are the source of much amusement. Among the most spectacular:

Appalachian English - characterized by a heavy drawl. In more isolated regions there is much borrowing from Scots-Irishisms: "I swan" for "I swear", "chimbley" for chimney, "like to" for almost. The plural of you, depending on which part of Appalachia is "y'all" (further south) or "y'uns" (further north).

Southern English - I is pronounced "ah". A soft drink is always a "Coke" even if it is really a Sprite, Pepsi, or Dr. Pepper. The plural of you is "y'all". Think stereotypical Daisy Duke-speak here: "Y'all mahnd if ah go skinny-dippin'?"

Yat -- nigh incomprehensible, often subtitled dialect from New Orleans

Texas English - has a drawl but not as heavy as in Appalachia or the southeast. Think more of a western drawl and try to talk like John Wayne or Ross Perot. Hello is "howdy". Partner is "podner". Also spoken in other states like Oklahoma and New Mexico and as far northwest as Wyoming (anything past that e.g. Montana, Pacific Northwest English takes over). On CB radio, everyone speaks Texas English no matter what accent they normally have. NB there are people in Texas who do speak like Boomhauer from "King of the Hill."

California English - stereotypical surfer, valley girl, and hippie-speak didn't come out of nowhere. All three are pretty much examples of the same California accent. "Aww dood, he's goin' through changes like fer shuur. Awesome!" Add "like" at odd places in your sentences and affect a laid back style like you're permanently on vacation at the beach. Spoken only in and around coastal Los Angeles—where Hollywood is, incidentally, which is why this accent gets such good coverage in movies.

Boston English - in Boston you "pock the cah". The phonemes corresponding to the letter "r" may scarcely be heard in Boston.[note 1] Boston English is difficult to comprehend by anyone visiting from any other region, as anyone landing at Logan "Aihpoht" and trying to rent a "cah" can attest. Gloucester and Worcester are pronounced "Glosstah" and "Wisstah".

Boston Brahmin - A unique, almost British sounding version of English spoken almost entirely by families that came with the Pilgrims.

New York English - in New York you "pwark the cwar". The letter "r" is overpronounced and "w" is added to everything possible. "This Nwew Ywork cwold is rrrotten!" The plural of you is "youse". Each borough has a slightly different accent so it is possible to detect whether one is from Brooklyn or the Bronx by their accent.

Pittsburgh English - the rule to remember here is house, mouse, downtown, etc. are pronounced haas, maas, and dahntahn. The plural of you is "yinz". A soft drink is a "pop".

Pacific Northwest English - Seattle and Portland are where they used to send newscasters to lose whatever eastern dialect they had and learn to speak "without an accent", but the rural PNW is a different story altogether. Watch Ax Men to get an idea. It's almost an exact cross between Canadian and Californian English with occasional borrowings from Chinook. About is pronounced "aboat".

Upper Midwest English - The is pronounced "da", "yes" is said in German instead of English, creek is pronounced "crick", the U.P. is "da yoop", and otherwise it sounds like Bob & Doug McKenzie's Canadian English except without the "eh?" For more authenticity add Scandinavianisms like "uff da" here and there. See also How to Talk Minnesotan, by Howard Mohr.

Mid-Atlantic English - A type of English that isn't quite American but isn't quite British; it's caught somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic. Examples include Franklin D. Roosevelt, Cary Grant, or Katherine Hepburn.