Beer, Beer and More Beer’s Brewing Sculptures

by Randal

Do you like beer, but are dissatisfied with the seemingly endless parade of bland yellow fizzy mass-produced beers? Would you like to inspire awe and respect amongst your gadget-loving beer-drinking buddies? Do you have vast “untapped” financial resources? Look no further than Beer, Beer and More Beer’s amazing Brewing Sculptures!
The B3-2000 Brewing Sculpture goes far beyond the “pale” of many typical homebrew setups. Much more than a package of malt-extract, hops, yeast and plastic fermentation buckets, a Brewing Sculpture is a complete microprocessor controlled microbrewery capable of making up to eight cases of beer in a single batch. Make beer like the pros from whole grains and water. With the B3-2000 you have complete control over any beer style you could want to make whether your fancy turns to lager, stout, India pale ale or gruit.

To keep your bank account low and your interest piqued, B3 makes an array of add-ons and peripherals for the entire line of Brewing Sculptures. Get all of them and the B3-2000 will do just about everything for you except fetch some aspirin the next morning. However, if you like to take a more hands on approach to your zymurlogical exploits B3 also offers the B3-1500 which will require a little more elbow grease and has a batch output of two cases (or five US gallons).

Just picture it – you in the backyard, a B3 Brewing Sculpture to your right fired up with all three 170,000 BTU burners revved up and howling like a jet engine while to your left a BBQ is roasting ribs and brisket.
This is ground-zero manliness folks, you’ll be able to export testosterone to 3rd world countries and have enough left over to make “Smiling Bob” from those Enzyte commercials look like some kind of tofu-eating choir boy.