Sunday, November 19, 2017

Conservative Christians, Atheists and Fear of Death

“Why are evangelical Christians and
conservative Catholics over-represented among those who experience higher
levels of guilt, regret and uncertainty in the face of impending death?”

That’s a question a friend who works as a
spiritual health care provider asked recently.

His question was prompted by being at the
deathbeds of some very religious people who were deeply afraid of what would
happen after they died.

He mentioned an older woman who had lived a
full, productive and largely joyful Christian life.

“She was a very good person to whom God was
mightily important,” he said. Yet, as death approached, she was worried that
she wasn’t good enough to be accepted into heaven.

Or, as my friend put it, “the ‘blessed
assurance’ of which she'd sung so confidently for decades had evaporated into
question marks.”

Another devout Christian, who had also lived a
full life of service for others, also worried about his worthiness as his life
neared its end—he worried about the things in the Bible he had failed to do.

My friend wondered: Why was he now worried
mostly about the things he should have done instead of being content with the
many good things he had accomplished?

My friend realized not every devout believer
felt that way. “Yet it seems to be generally true that the most devout of
conservative Christians have a tougher time . . . at the end of life,” he said.

“They respond with guilt and self-loathing to a
greater extent than those of more liberal practice, or, indeed, those with no
declared religious affiliation.”

Eighteen
percent of the studies indeed did find that some religious people struggle with
death.

According to one of those studies, these tend
to be people who have been taught to believe in a demanding and vindictive God,
and who may have received a lifelong dose of sermons about the Hellfire and
punishment awaiting those who don’t measure up.

Some of the studies accounted for this by
distinguishing between what they called intrinsic religiosity—where belief
motivates behaviour—and extrinsic religiosity—where behavior bolsters beliefs.

Those who had intrinsic faith tended to be more
at peace about dying, compared to extrinsic believers who worried they weren’t
doing enough to please God.

The
review also found another group of people who approach death with a sense of
peace: Atheists.

This isn’t surprising; if you don’t
believe in an afterlife, whether that’s a belief in a heaven or in Hell, then
there’s nothing to worry about either way.

“It
actually makes a lot of sense. When you realize death is just a natural part of
life, and you’re confident about what will happen after you die, and you’re
focused on making the most of the life you have, it’s not surprising that
atheists don’t fear death.”

But back to my friend; what does he think about
those people who were very religious, yet fearful of death?

For him, “guilt is the common denominator. And
fear.”

This may be because their “spiritual formation
likely included more of an emphasis on Hell than in many other traditions, and
a sense that ‘I have to get it right’ in order to avoid damnation and
experience paradise.”

For him, legalism and moralism “produce
unhealthy guilt, leaving many dying people to wonder if they actually got it
right. They seem to be projecting onto God the rigidity of their practice.”

When that happens, it’s hard for people “to
truly relax in the arms of grace when you've spent much of your religious life
emphasizing holy living.”

At the bedsides of people who feel this way,
his goal is to “remind them that the steadfast love of the Lord endures forever
. . . I suggest that God honours the direction of their heart's desire, and
that a desire to please God matters more than the finer points of their
doctrine. God can be trusted.”From the Nov.
18 Winnipeg Free Press.

1 comment:

I have been at many bedsides of people with strong conservative faith in God who are looking forward to being with Jesus. There is peace and a knowing where they are going. I understand my role as a spiritual care giver is to assure those in my care of the all surpassing love of God. There is nothing that we can do or not do that will keep God from loving us. - Wanda Derksen