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Josh Hutcherson and the Mysterious Nose Incident

Fandom, it may be time for us to panic! Something has occurred in the life of Josh Hutcherson and the media didn’t immediately tell us! Where in the world did things go wrong?!

Yesterday, Josh Hutcherson tweeted that he’s recovering from surgery after breaking his nose. This means that the actual breaking of his nose likely happened at least a few days ago (Regular people would have to wait weeks for surgery, but we digress…)

See?!

Now, a celebrity breaking their nose isn’t really a big deal. The most mysterious part of it all is that the circumstances surrounding Josh breaking his nose remain totally unknown.

As usual, when there is a lack of information, we start rumors. Here’s a few possibilities:

NEWMAN!

1. He was attacked by a lesser actor who is jealous of his success. Probably NEWMAN (and we’re not referring to Seinfeld)!2. All those rabid fangirl stalkers finally discovered his location and decided that if they could, they would take his nose. It didn’t go so well.3. A delusional fanatic decided that they wanted a stage their own Hunger Games.. and they were going to be Cato.4. Josh is so good at sports that he decided to try out a new one: UFC fighting. Then he remembered his general muscle mass and structure.5. Expecting to win the MTV Movie Award for Best Kiss, he decided to practice for his acceptance kiss with a lovely lady (who is NOT Jennifer Lawrence, because she has a boyfriend). Things got way too enthusiastic!

Of course, the point of this all is that it doesn’t really matter HOW Josh broke his nose, just that it’s pretty sucktacular that he DID. Yet here fans are, pretty obsessed because they don’t know all the facts behind the incident. Is it really our place or our right to know? Why are we so interested in knowing when really, it doesn’t affect us in any way, shape, or form? All we hope is that Josh feels better soon and doesn’t come out with a “new nose” that we have to facepalm about later.