When you have to leave work early for a kid-related activity or doctor's appointment, do you say that's what you're doing or do you make up another excuse?”

15 replies so far...

I used to hide and make up another excuse but within the past year and after having a second kid, I am up-front about it. The way I see it is that my employer better accept that I have a family and respect that. I have no reason to hide. I am proud of having a family and if I have to leave early for family matters than that is what it is. I find that they are understanding and respectful.

I tell them why I have to leave early. My boss has a kid so at first he was understanding but he seems to be over it. I've had to leave early/come in late for appointments, take days off when he's sick, take days off when daycare is closed, etc. Although I can tell it bothers him, so far he still hasn't said no and I dont think he will. He has, however commented that maybe he should've hired an older lady who had grown kids for my position. On another note, he has also said that the only way out of working for him is feet first (which he means, until death do us part - in a working manor). So, who knows.

I say why I'll be out if I come in late, leave early, or have an appointment in the middle of the day, but I have some flexibility in my hours. Unless I take a full day off, I'll block my calendar for that period for the appointment but make it up in the day somehow. I'll also schedule conference calls during the driving times to stay productive and not miss too much.

I say what it is for. I work for a very family friendly company and taking time off for Dr visits or an emergency is not an issue. I make sure that all of my projects are updated so that if there is an issue while I am out of the office it is covered.

I don't have the option of leaving early because I teach. I have to plan ahead and get a substitute to cover. If I'm gone often, I let the principal know why I'm taking another sick day. If it's just an occasional sick day, it's not an issue.

We have 2 sections in our end of the floor, mine and another. The other has only 2 people, but we all work as 1 and help each other. Anyway, the supervisor of the other section, a divorced man of 54, started making some snotty comments last year about how I seemed to be leaving early a lot. Now, mind you that he's NOT my supervisor at all and my supervisor has kids (so does this other guy) and he split-shifts with his wife when their kids are sick or whatever. My supervisor has NEVER said a word to me. So when the other guy started ragging on me in front of my own co-workers, I went into his office and very firmly but politiely told him that if HE had a problem with me being gone and my own supervisore DIDN'T, then he needed to get over himself, and it really wasn't any of his business in the first place, that I do my work to my supervisor's satisfaction.

Needless to say, I haven't heard another peep out of him. And considering he's got 3 kids himself, tho he is divorced, I was really suprised but I did nip it in the bud.

I ran across a great article about this very topic recently on a website for parents of kids with Autism, and wrote a bit about it on my website, so I won't rehash it here. But the central point was: You don't need to "make an excuse" - just say "Sorry, I have a conflict" (or maybe "I have a personal appointment") and move on. As the article says "everybody has something".

I used to work in an office with all older guys, one of whom once told me that he found it so "interesting" that I worked because his wife never did. I would sometimes say why I need to leave early but often would make up meetings for work. I hated doing it but it was a way to keep things smooth at the office.

Ditto JDaffron - I just say that I have an appointment and let them know in advance. Ask someone in HR for sure, but I think there are laws protecting your privacy and they really aren't supposed to ask what it's for.