Articles by Gary Lovejoy

Dr. Gary Lovejoy has, for over 34 years, conducted his private counseling practice where he has extensive experience serving individuals, couples, and families. He continues an active private practice with Valley View Counseling Services, LLC in Portland, Oregon, of which he is the founder. Dr. Lovejoy was a professor of both psychology and religion at Mt. Hood Community College for 32 years. He earned a master’s degree in religious education from Fuller Theological Seminary as well as a master’s in psychology at California State University, Los Angeles, and completed his doctorate in psychology while attending the United States International University. Dr. Lovejoy has conducted numerous seminars on depression and been the keynote speaker at many family camps, couple’s retreats and college conferences. Dr. Lovejoy and his wife, Sue, have two adult children. He is co-author of Light on the Fringe: Finding Hope in the Darkness of Depression.

Several years ago, I witnessed a parent in the corner of a family playroom, sitting on a three legged stool and lecturing his child about some misbehavior. All of a sudden, one of the legs broke under his weight, and he went tumbling backward, banging his head on a Lego structure sitting on the floor…

How many times, in the spirit of social ritual, have you asked someone at church how they’re doing and gotten the reply, “Oh, fine”, only later to find out that his or her world was falling apart? We have a history of being conditioned by life to rarely practice true honesty with others. This may…

Most couples entering pre-marriage counseling eagerly anticipate happy times ahead. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t be there in the first place. Many clearly want something different than their parents had, but they’re still not sure how to make that happen. Some have already ignored red flags in their courtship and others have preemptively dismissed them…

Tony stood aghast at Marsha’s push back against his proposal to use their vacation time to go kayaking on their favorite lake in the mountains. His wife revealed to him that, while she had been willing in the past to go to the mountains, she had always been partial to spending time at the beach. During…

Most of the time, as we go through the day, we are not aware that the ideas underlying our internal narratives originally came from our childhoods. Yet, these are ideas that influence virtually every judgment we make. They shape our assumptions, beliefs, and expectations, which, in turn, determine not only our views of events and…