Meteor ‘God’s anger’ over gay marriages, warns 73-year-old celibate

A fireball witnessed over Britain on Saturday night is a warning from God over David Cameron’s plan to allow gay marriages, warns the most senior Roman Catholic cleric in the country.

Cardinal Keith O’Brien has described the proposal as ‘a grotesque subversion of a universally accepted human right’. He predicted that gay marriage would turn the UK ‘into a country where it would be dangerous for any man to have even a Roman Catholic arse’.

‘Redefining marriage would shame the United Kingdom in the eyes of the world,’ added the cardinal, ‘ and I speak as a leader of a Church with unparalleled experience of being shamed in the eyes of the world.’

‘We should not forget the fate of the dinosaurs,’ said the 73-year-old frocked celibate.