Coos Bay is a city located in Coos County, Oregon with a total population of 15,374. The city is located at the mouth of the Coos River on Coos Bay, on the Oregon Coast. Coos Bay is home to Southwestern Oregon Community College, an Indian Casino, nearby world class golf, Oregon Dunes National Recreation Area, Steve Prefontaine and a whole lot of Meth.

Downtown Coos Bay has many tourist amenities, including a boardwalk, pedestrian mall, coffee shops, bistros, the Coos Art Museum and Mingus Park; but is surounded by vast slums such as Empire (home to the area's one and only Wal*Mart), Bunker Hill, Englewood and Barview. Here crime is rampant, drug production thrives and drunken wife beating is the norm. These areas are also where a majority of the town's murders take place.

Coos Bay is also home to many fine beaches. Nearby are Sunset Bay, Cape Arago, Basendorff and Horsefall beaches. These beaches are usually empty and pristine, due to the constant wind and fog that characterizes the area's climate. Those who decide to brave the cool weather sometimes hold bonfires but are usually stopped, illegally searched and fined by the fascist local county and state police, who instead of focusing on the rampant crime forementioned, prefer to prevent young adults from having any sort of fun at the beach.

Demographics:

There are 15,374 people residing in the city, comprising 6,497 households and 4,028 families. The racial makeup of the city is 90.00% White, 0.00% African American, 0.00% Asian, 0.00% Pacific Islander, 0.00% from other races, and 0.00% from two or more races. 10% of the population are Mexicans. Of the whites, 92.15% are classified as White Trash Hillbillies."

The per capita income for the city is $16,158. 36.5% of the population and 32.7% of families are below the poverty line.

Coos Bay is a religious, conservative stronghold in the otherwise progressive Pacific Northwest. In 2004, 90.76% of the population were registered as republicans, 4% as democrats and 4% as members of the Constitution Party. In 2003, during the onset of the war in Iraq, Coos Bay city council held a vote to ban the French Flag from city property. In 2006, members of the white trash hillbillie community held a "We can live without you, Mexicans" rally. A survey in 2006 concluded a large 97.5% "hates queers," and 89.25% "hates minorities." Coos Bay is also notorious for being some 2,500 miles from the South, yet the Confederate Flag can bee seen almost everywhere.

Person from Kentucky: "Hey, let's go to Coos Bay, I hear they have alot of Meth and a sweet Super-Wal*Mart!"

Person from Coos Bay: "I have a weight problem. Let's go to the King's Table after Dr. Phil is over."