The Idea of Her…

Dear Single and Waiting,

I love women that want to be women. I get that when you’re alone you have to be tough. You have to do all the things around the house a man should be doing, you have to shield yourself from all the assholes and players and con artist that want nothing more than to sleep with you or get a couple dollars from you.

I’m not blind to what it takes to be a woman in our society these days, you can’t be weak, you can’t go to work and not carry yourself with a certain mindset or they will take advantage of you.

Understand this though, there is going to come a time when you have to put some of that toughness aside. When you have to smile and accept help when help is being offered. I’m not going to judge you for what you had to do when I wasn’t in your life. I understand that it will take some time for you to give up some of that control that has been with you since you were living on your own.

I’m not asking you to give up your identity or to be this submissive housewife that doesn’t ask questions and cooks every night. That works because I want you to or stays home because I want you to. That’s not what I’m asking, what I’m asking is that you trust me enough to let me be there for you.

You tell me your secrets and I’ll tell you mines, you open up to me about your past and I’ll open up to you about my fears. I don’t want to replace your best friend or your mother because I’m neither of those. I want to be your man! I don’t want you to be my Queen and I’m no King, I want us to be soldiers together building a Kingdom.

This idea that I’m going to cater to you or you to me isn’t something I’d ask or do. We are going to cater and spoil each other. A lot of men say and write that they want this woman that’s their everything, not me. I want you to have a life, to go to concerts with your girls, happy hours, brunches, shopping. I’ll be at home waiting for the details, for the drunken foreplay. You don’t have to earn my trust it’s already here waiting, all I ask is that you not lose it. The same way I won’t lose yours.

Tell me you love me and I’ll fight any man that disrespects you, that hurts you, that scares you. Show me you love me and I’ll give my life for your ass! These are vows I’m making before I even know who you are.

Being single these past several years, all the dating, all the women, all the hits and misses has taught me that what I want more than anything is everything. I’m sure I’ve broken some hearts with my words and my actions but I don’t regret that. I’d rather hurt them by telling them they just aren’t for me then string them along because I’m lonely or horny. It’s been awhile since I’ve really written, call it a sabbatical, call it writers block, call it whatever you like. Just know I’m back now with a passion and vengeance that will get me you and on the New York Times Bestsellers list!

Understand this though, there is going to come a time when you have to put some of that toughness aside. When you have to smile and accept help when help is being offered. I’m not going to judge you for what you had to do when I wasn’t in your life. I understand that it will take some time for you to give up some of that control that has been with you since you were living on your own.