August 2016 Newsletter

In This Issue

Safety Planning For Victims

A personalized safety plan is a guide to ways to help keep you, your children, and your pets safe whether you are living in a domestic violence situation, planning to leave, or have already left. Safety planning can help you prepare in advance for different possibilities, set up things you may need in the future (copies of important documents, extra keys, etc.), talk with trusted family, friends or neighbors , and much more.

Because every situation is unique, a good safety plan will be designed to fit your specific situation. A plan may include what to do during an abusive incident, safety planning with children, safety planning during pregnancy, technology safety (phones, social media, GPS devices, etc.), safety planning for friends and relatives, and safety planning for pets.

For instance, during an abusive incident, try to move away from the kitchen, bathroom, and other areas where there may be easily reached weapons. Avoid wearing long scarves and jewelry that can become a weapon, and if you think an incident may be coming, put up long hair so it can’t be grabbed easily.

At The Safe Center, we can help you safety plan for your particular situation through the hotline at 516-542-0404.

A new free Tech Safety App by the National Network to End Domestic Violence helps users understand how a particular technology could be misused to harass or stalk, what they can do about it, and offers safety tips on how to increase their safety and privacy. The app also includes a wide range of resources, and can be found at TechSafetyApp.org.

There are also good safety planning resources online, three of which are listed below. If you think your abuser might be able to access your devices, it may be better to explore these and other related sites from a public computer, such as at a library.

Many Faces of Violence: Child Abuse Conference

On April 15th The Safe Center planned and facilitated the 6th annual “Many Faces of Family Violence: Child Abuse” Conference in conjunction with the County Executive’s Family Violence Task Force, The Nassau County Department of Social Services, LIU Post and LIU Brooklyn. This was the first year that The Safe Center served as the lead agency for the Conference and the first time its focus was on child abuse.

More than 400 Social Workers, Teachers, Detectives, CPS Workers and private citizens from Nassau and the surrounding counties attended the Conference, held on LIU Post’s Brookville campus. The Conference was bookended by Keynote Addresses from Dr. Ross Cheit from Brown University, author of The Witch Hunt Narrative: Politics, Psychology and the Sexual Abuse of Children and The Safe Center’s Education Director, Anthony Zenkus.

The event also featured presentations from a number of experts on child abuse-related topics including clinical responses to child abuse, the commercial sexual exploitation of minors and The Safe Center’s Nassau County Child Advocacy Center’s investigative response to child abuse.

The event will be held again on April 7th, 2017 at LIU Post. The 2017 Call for Workshops is now available. Submissions Must be Received by September 30th, 2016.

Josh Hanson, Child Advocacy Center Director

School Supply Drive Needs Your Help

Every year, we reach out to our community to request donations that enable us to provide school supplies for our client families in need at The Safe Center. These donations help the children prepare for and look forward to the upcoming school year. Last year we were able to serve approximately 200 students through our school supply drive and anticipate similar demand for students in the K-12 age group this year.

In order to fulfill the unique school supply lists provided to families at the start of the school year, and to give our clients the dignity to shop with their children, we are asking for gift cards to be donated in lieu of supplies. Please purchase in increments of $25 or less. Suggested stores include Staples, Target, Walmart, CVS and Rite Aid due to their accessibility.

Support A Child – We are asking that the donations be dropped off or mailed no later than August 26th.

Make an online donation and allocate it towards the campaign: School Supply Drive 2016.

If you have any questions regarding our school supply drive, please do not hesitate to contact dradler@tscli.org or 516.465.9281.

Josephine’s Story

Josephine had known James all her life. After a particularly messy break-up, they shared that they had a romantic interest in each other and began to date. James was attentive, charming, caring and complimentary. Josephine’s friends and family liked him, and soon they fell in love. James wanted to spend every minute possible with Josephine. He didn’t think she needed to spend as much time with friends, so he cut them out of her life. Family as well. Eventually, nothing was good enough for James. His words became cutting, and Josephine tried but could never please him. No matter what she did, she was always doing “something wrong”. The hitting didn’t’ start right away, but when it did, there were excuses. He’s under stress. He’ll try harder next time. Drugs and alcohol helped numb the pain and the disappointment, days blurred into each other. The abuse got worse.

It wasn’t until she was laying face-down on a sidewalk in a pool of her own blood, with onlookers standing by, that Josephine realized that she might be a victim of domestic violence. James had punched her, kicked her, slapped her before, but this time he had pushed her face through a plate-glass window. Part of her nose was missing. For months after, she told everyone she’d been in a car accident. Still, she didn’t leave. The drugs and drinking got worse, she thought she’d never make it through.

One day, at her wits end, Josephine was wandering the streets, and flagged down a patrol car and asked the police officer to take her to the Medical Center. She checked herself in to the County Drug Rehab, and began her slow journey of recovery. While there, she met a counselor from The Safe Center who visits the rehab regularly. After she was released, Josephine became a client of The Safe Center, receiving counseling and advocacy services to help her manage her sobriety and live a life free of domestic abuse. A few years later, Josephine is a new woman. The Safe Center helped her get facial reconstruction surgery, and she’s living free of abuse and substances.

And most importantly, she is able to say that today she loves herself.

Josephine’s experience, strength and hope has inspired her to speak at presentations in front of groups, inspiring professionals and community members alike with her story. Last year, she was the special survivor speaker at The Safe Center’s Annual Gala. She has helped train social work students at a local university, and most recently was the special guest speaker at our Fashion Show fundraiser.

Josephine is a true Safe Center success story. Join us in celebrating her journey of healing and hope as she carries the message forward: Love Shouldn’t Hurt