Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

Her Lawyer screwed up here. Seriously there are better ways to give back to her new country than letting the GOV mismanage her money. How about feeding some hungry people, $70,000 would feed a lot of hungry kids.

And yes, I agree, somehow she got some weird meds. It's a sweet idea, I suppose, but I'm with Judi here: MediCare's been handing out some bizarre drugs, those that (somehow) induce an otherwise (I'm assuming) normal Germanic lady to throw her money into the government toilet.

I wonder if she squatted above the seat when she did it. If she had arthritis, probably not...

Am I the only to notice that this story was submitted by a Mr. Michael Greenspan. Not that I am a conspiracy theorist or anything (looking over my shoulder as I say this), but Michael isn't perhaps related to Alan is he?

Sounds like my grandma. Completely crazy. No doubt that most of my grandparent's money has gone to pay for grandma's meds for who knows what since she refuses to use the generic cheaper crap because it's not specifically what the doctor wrote down. SIGH

There are different stages of young and old. 13 is young for a teenager and old for a kindergartner; 25 is young for an adult and old for a teenager; 40 is young for a grandparent and old for an adult; 74 is young for Dick Clark but calorically impossible for Ruben Studdard. (I base these ideas on the fact that, since the average life expectancy for women is 78 and for men 73, 40 is well past the average halfway marker, at which point God himself makes sure your life goes downhill like Louie Anderson on a Velveeta-greased waterslide--VERY FAST--until you reach retirement, when you can move to Florida and haunt Dave Barry.)

That leaves you only 15 short years, from the age of 25 to 40, to have a family and semiregular sex. I know four people younger than me who are getting a head start and getting married soon, and one other who's a month older and has been engaged to his girlfriend since their first date. And don't get me started on how all these young people want to be older and all the old people want to be young again. I don't normally quote Eminem, but, the whole point is: You only get one shot.

Doug, if you really believe that "40 is... old for an adult" check back when you reach that "old" age. Boy, will you ever change your tune! In the late 60s we were told "never trust anyone over 30" but believe me, the older you get the older the age becomes that you think of as "old" (if that's not too confusing). You may not be "as young as you feel" or any of the other cliches, but trust me, 40 is only old to someone who is 20.

The total wasn't significant -- in her final years, medical costs had shrunk the one-time $500,000 estate to about $98,000

Are you #$@## kidding me?! $98,000 isn't significant? OK, maybe I'm just $98,000 poorer than she was so it seems more significant to me than it does to the IRS, who is actually largely responsible for me being $98,000 poorer to begin with ... but that is still a decent amount of money ... You can buy a home for that in some states ... not mine, mind you ... in Connecticut, you can buy a tool shed for that.

punky brewster,
neo-nutmegger here, and you aren't kidding about the prices for tool sheds or any sort of potential housing. and i can't see where it goes. i'd be happier paying taxes if only i saw nice roads, public service, little signs like that showing taxes were spent on public projects.

Age really is a mind-over-matter thing. My 81-year-old mother-in-law put off having cataract surgery until she noticed it was affecting her bowling score (6 weeks after surgery, her team cleaned up at state bowling tournament!). My 82-year-old father just went canoeing down a swift river (they had to portage around waterfalls) and he says the government can have his money when they pry it from his cold dead fingers...