A Life to Remember

Today I decided to get something off my chest… It’s this damn 5 pound necklace with the words Lady Gaga on it! Excuse me while I put it down… There! That’s better. I don’t even like Gaga to begin with so I don’t know why I bought it. I mean, maybe she has a couple of songs I like… Ok, maybe I liked one or two of her albums too…which I play every day when I take a shower…or listen in the car…or when I’m cooking something…or just always… I freaking love her! Necklace is going back on!

But there is something else I’d like to get off my chest if you allow me to get personal with you. Two years ago I suffered a terrible car crash and this caused me to lose my memories. I live with amnesia now and it’s horrible because it’s not possible for me to remember my whole life before the accident or retaining new information nowadays. Have you seen 50 First Dates? It’s pretty much the same thing, but it takes me more than 24 hours to forget things. Also Adam Sandler is not after my a$$. I retain only those things I write down on paper. My life today exists just as long as I write it down and go through my notes every month so I don’t forget.

What was I talking about just now?…

Oh yes! Don’t you love fish? My friends call me Dory because of that film Finding Dory. They say I repeat myself a lot and some people had to re-introduce themselves to me several times over a 3-month period because of this amnesia problem that I have. Have I told you about that? Many people tend to reunite with someone they have not seen in a while and say things like “Man! How the hell have you been?! It’s been so long!” When I don’t stay in touch with someone for a long time, I say things like “Nice to meet you, I’m Jerry. And your name is..?” I am grateful to know people who don’t mind playing along so I don’t feel bad about it, but I am trying to get better.

Uh… What was I talking about?…

Don’t you love Batman! He’s my ultimate favorite hero! Only I didn’t know who he was because I completely forgot about all the comics, clothing items and memorabilia I collected about him over the years because of my amnesia. Did I tell you I have amnesia? It happened 2 years ago due to a car crash. Anyway, once I realized I had a Facebook account, I looked it over and saw many “get well” messages posted by people who knew about my car accident and many of them had a picture of Batman on those. When I looked inside my closet, none of the clothes were familiar to me and noticed I owned 32 Batman shirts! I was also told I loved working out so I asked my sister: “Ok, please be honest. I can handle the truth. Am I this Batman dude? Because, if I am, I’m short a butler and a lot of freaking money right now!” I now own over 68 Batman-themed articles of clothing and, every time I wear them, I take a picture with them to post on my Facebook with captions like “Batman is going to the gym” or “Batman is about to go dancing” because, even though I cannot remember my friends and family members, I know they are watching and I want them to know that “Batman” is still here even if I am a different person today.

One of my biggest regrets about losing my memories is not having the ability to learn life’s lessons and become a much better and wiser person because of that. Treasure your memories whether they’re good or bad. They shape you…make you who you are today and what is to become of you tomorrow. Yeah, it may be cool to forget about all those horrible exes you had, but you also forget about your childhood. Having amnesia is not that much of a blessing as others have told me. Yeah, it’s great to get away with late rent payment because you just forgot, but you get to also forget about your prom night or college years. I don’t really know anyone like me unless they are older and suffering from Alzheimer’s, but if you do know someone, feel free to contact us and tell me all about it. I’d love to get in touch with these people!

What the hell was I talking about?…

Right, March is my birthday month so I’m expecting lots of presents from you all! Make them very shiny! Or maybe a movie, or something having to do with Batman. I think I like those, but I’m not sure. Hey, I might have lost a big part of the last 35 years of my life, but I’ve got 35 more to go and I will make sure they are fantastic. I am certain you’re going to have a fantastic month as well! I love you all and, please, remember to be good to one another.

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