The biggest secret about soulmates

First off, if you landed here seeking your astrological soulmate, please don't get caught up in the romantic Hollywood notion of soulmate!

Soulmates do not complete us (this is in my opinion a dangerous lie).

But what they do have the potential to do… is bring out our hidden strengths, and give us the impetus to become whole ourselves.

So when sincerely investigating your astrological soulmate... don’t ask: Is that person my soulmate? Do ask: Who do I need to be to attract my soulmate - whoever that may be.

By the way, I believe that soulmates are souls we've known before in past lifetimes. But they aren’t just lovers. Soulmates can be lovers or friends…or both. They can also be parents, teachers, siblings or even our children.

In the presence of a soulmate, we feel a deep sense of comfort and familiarity… as if we’ve known that person forever.

“Repeat after me: love is no longer where soulmate attraction ends; it is where soulmate attraction begins.”

– Karen M. Black

Chart synastry

The synastry beween two astrological charts is one approach in traditional relationship astrology that looks at the compatibility between two people. Synastry helps identify where there might be tension and where there’s an easier flow.

In the right hands, chart synastry is an art. The thing is... while synastry is valuable in shedding light on existing relationships, synastry alone doesn't predict who your future partner will be.

Here’s why I’ve come to this conclusion…

Two people with fantastic synastry may meet – and never get together. Perhaps one person's ready and the other isn't. Perhaps the timing is wrong. Or any number of scenarios, which I’m quite sure you can imagine!

On the other hand, if you and your sweetie are a challenging love match... but you're both self-aware and committed to your own growth and to each other, there's no reason why you won't end up together for the long-term.

That is, if you’re both willing and able to work through your differences when they arise (no, I don’t think soulmates exist in a rosy glow with no problems… they just have the maturity and willingness to work through them together).

Have fun exploring. But like I said, I’d personally use synastry to deepen my understanding of an existing relationship, rather than predicting a future one.

Composite charts

Composite charts are a type of traditional relationship astrology where you put the charts of two people together (using mid-point calculations) to create a separate chart that represents the relationship itself.

Like synastry, I can see how a composite chart could very well deepen a long-term relationship. For example, composite charts have a North Node, representing the purpose for the relationship: it doesn’t get any deeper than that!

But even when a composite relationship chart has all kinds of positive and supportive aspects, it still comes down to two individuals and free will choice. Meet at the wrong time, forget it. Not over your lover when you meet someone who’s ready, forget it. And so on.

Composite charts are fascinating. But if you’re seeking a true soulmate relationship, it's more important to know who you are and where you want to go first… and then asking: who will go with you (not the other way around).

Mix these two up… and you’re tempting karma to teach you the lesson later on. Nuff said.

Personally, this is why I return to the astrological soulmate secrets offered by karmic astrology. Because karmic astrology begins by asking who you are… and who you came here to be.

Get that part right… and you’ll attract a soulmate who resonate with the real, inner you (and you them, of course).

Karmic astrology is a soulmate secret

The heart of a karmic astrology chart is the moon's North and South Nodes, or points where the moon intercepts the earth's orbit around the sun. These are also called True Nodes in some circles.

Spiritual and esoteric astrologers believe that the nodes create a point of soul magnetism grounding the past while pulling us toward the future. That’s why North and South Nodes are always in opposite signs.

So if your south node is in Capricorn (like mine is), your North Node would be in the opposite sign of Cancer. To create a purpose-driven life, you’d consciously shift from masculine, earthy Capricorn energy, to a lighter, more feminine Cancer energy (yes, even for men).

Your North Node symbolizes the path of greatest soul growth. In other words, it's the energy that your soul intended for you learn in this life, to balance your past lives.

Because your North Node symbolizes growth… this is also where your astrological soulmate lives. And the nice thing is that while waiting for your soulmate to come into your life… you have many rich ways to create a contented and meaningful life on your own.

A North Node example from my own life

My South Node is in Capricorn — I'm naturally precise, business-like, pragmatic and dependable. BUT! When I'm stressed I can get very strict and rigid. So Capricorn is a strength for me, but it’s also my Achilles Heel.

Opposite to my Capricorn South Node is my North Node in Cancer. So in a nutshell, I'm here to learn how to be more nurturing and emotional, while retaining the best part of Capricorn. My astrological soulmate (so to speak) will certainly appreciate my Cappy qualities, but on balance, will encourage me to become lighter, creative and more feminine.

Karmic astrology integrates your personality with your soul

Living your soul mission is really about integrating the best of both opposite signs (in my case, Cancer and Capricorn). Put into action, your North and South Nodes help you align with the life your soul intended for you (so you’re working with your soul instead of against it).

If you have your exact time of birth, you can also learn the astrological houses your North and South nodes reside in. For example, my North Node in Cancer is expressed in the 12th house. I'm here to explore the karma around my emotional life. So me writing about mysterious topics such as life purpose, awakening and even soulmates fits well with this energy.

The rest of your karmic astrology chart gives insights on your personality, with some past life information thrown in as well. Plus other hints about your astrological soulmate to help you recognize them.

Two steps to recognizing your astrological soulmate

Step 1: Use your free karmic astrology chart to get your North Node

There’s no known free karmic astrology software that I know of. But here’s easy, step-by-step instructions on how you can create your own free karmic astrology chart using traditional online astrology software.

Step 2: Come back to this page the read the astrological soulmate secrets below!

Once you have your North Node sign come back to this page and discover how you can recognize when you’re in a soulmate relationship.

For a broader perspective, you can also read my detailed descriptions of each North Node by sign and by house.

Astrological soulmate secrets for North Node signs

Hint! Our North Nodes are traits that we’ll evolve and deepen over our lifetime. So if they seem odd or challenging at first, that's cool. When you're stuck, keep the perspective in mind.

By the way, I’ve used “she” for the following descriptions, but yes these tips also apply to men. Using “their” or “we” just sounded awkward to me…so there ya go.

North Node in Aries: The spiritual warrior

Keynote: “I am”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to form and strengthen your identity... and find out who you really are as an individual! When you do this, it will improve and deepen your relationships on all levels.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you have an unshakable sense of yourself, with a deep desire for fair play. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll help you bring out your fiery, decisive, risk-taking and independent side.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often overly indecisive, vascillating, ambivalent, shallow, over-giving and dependent: run!

North Node in Taurus: The spiritual gardener

Keynote: “I have”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to possess your own set of values to live by and create inner security. When you do this, you will experience peace and stability... even in the midst of turbulent change.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are calm, steady and practically creative... with a sexy intense side as well! As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to heal old wounds and work steadily toward something you're passionate about.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often secretive, obsessive, possessive or together, you create intense, chaotic situations: run!

North Node in Gemini: The spiritual messenger

Keynote: “I think”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to develop flexibility, curiosity and openness to new ideas. When you do this, you enrich your relationships and exchanges with others, and discover the true meaning of wisdom.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice your curiosity and great listening skills. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll stimulate you to seek new, creative ideas and encourage you to write, speak or possibly teach what you learn to others.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often wild, hard to tame, commitment-phobic, brutally opinionated, or closed to new ideas: run!

North Node in Cancer: The spiritual mother

Keynote: “I feel”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to explore your emotional and nurturing qualities. When you do this, you will be able to enhance your relationships by offering protection and compassion to others when they need it... and most of all, compassion for yourself.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are an emotional wellspring of comfort, while also being down to earth. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to be vulnerable, support others and create a nurturing home that's solid and stable.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often rigid, strict, stubborn, insensitive or controlling: run!

North Node in Leo: The spiritual royal

Keynote: “I will”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to be in the spotlight as a creative, fun-loving, generous and inspired leader! When you do this, you'll experience deeper heart-connections with others, while maintaining your individuality and belief in equality.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice your exuberant love of life, warmth, generosity, and respect for others. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to think big, take risks, and lead others in change for the betterment of all.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often detached, eccentric, rebellious, overly rational or distant: run!

North Node in Virgo: The practical healer

Keynote: “I analyze”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to develop discernment, efficiency and good health so that you can be there for others without giving yourself away! When you do this, your energy will strengthen, and you'll have more you can give to others in service if you choose.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are health-conscious, organized and rational... with a hidden sensitive side! As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to work conscientiously, bringing healing to yourself and others.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often escapist, illusory, addictive, emotionally drained, self destructive or (yikes) in “victim” mode: run!

North Node in Libra: The master negotiator

Keynote: “I balance”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to develop tact, diplomacy and see others' point of view. When you do this, your relationships will prosper and you'll experience harmony, without sacrificing who you are as an individual.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you have a deep desire for justice... with a fiery side as well! As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your knack at creating win-win situations, while helping others find the inner strength that comes so naturally to you.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often quick-tempered, confrontational, impatient, burned-out, impulsive or reckless: run!

North Node in Scorpio: The spiritual investigator

Keynote: “I desire”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to dig deep in your relationships and the recesses of your soul in order to eliminate anything that's held you back. When you do this, you will feel uncluttered and strong, and your life will be ready for new growth.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that with you, still waters run very deep. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to explore sexually, navigate the depths of change and use your power for healing and transformation.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often stubborn, materialistic, vain or fearful of change: run!

North Node in Sagittarius: The spiritual teacher

Keynote: “I understand”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to re-discover what's natural! Including the outdoors, other cultures and mostly, your own philosophies about life. When you do this, you will experience true freedom – which you share with others if you choose.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are a generous and ethical friend with a natural ability to communicate. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to trust your intuition and love of travel, which broadens your understanding of life.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often scattered, unfocused, duplicitious, changeable, or inconsistent: run!

North Node in Capricorn: The spiritual father

Keynote: “I use”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to be a father to yourself, and mater the material world through develop practicality, integrity and self-reliance. When you do this, you will not only find success, but your success will feed you emotionally as well.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that he can always count on you... and that you have a soft romantic side as well. As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to plan, work hard and be resourceful in order to manifest your dreams.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often insecure, dependent, moody, insecure, timid, passive or need to be needed: run!

North Node in Aquarius: The spiritual individualist

Keynote: “I equalize”

Your soul path: In this life, you're here to develop your own set of rules, outside of the norm and to cultivate equality and sensitivity to the needs of others. When you do this, you will discover the meaning of true friendship, even during an affair of the heart.

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are a wonderful friend... with a warm, romantic side as well! As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to experience and grant freedom in a relationship – together with a deep heart-connection.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often demanding, vain, melodramatic, insecure or a drama queen: run!

How he'll recognize you: He'll notice that you are reflective, empathetic and sometimes quite psychic... with a logical side as well! As he becomes your astrological soulmate, he'll bring out your capacity to meditate, trust your psychic ability and explore your inner artist.

Warning signs: If in his presence, you are often picky, perfectionistic, overly analytical, critical, worrying, hypochondriac or workaholic: run!

So now you know the secrets of your astrological soulmate!

Take me to:

Karmic astrology – Learn more about karmic astrology and how it can help you create the life your soul intended.

North Node (your Soul Mission) – What the North Node is, plus detailed, life-changing descriptions of North Nodes by sign and house.