Saturday, 14 June 2014

Dear Aimee,

you know all those moments...when your heart has hurt so much you thought it was breakingwhen you've cried so much you left a puddle on the floorwhen you've bled so much you felt faintwhen you've drank so much you've wanted to jumpwhen you've swallowed so many pills you pass outwhen you've felt so lonely you've found company in the voiceswhen you've looked at the floor and felt outnumbered by the rabbitswhen you've wished it were youwhen you've thought they'd be better without youwhen you've wanted to die rather than hurt when you're so confused you don't know where you arewhen you've been restrained to save your lifewhen you've missed so many meals you've hoped you'd disappearwhen you've felt so let-down you wonder why you fight it? Yeah, those. They will be so worth it...when you'd rather feel hurt than be numbwhen you cry instead of cutting when you no longer have to fight suicidal momentswhen you drink for fun and not to forgetwhen you finally have peace in your head when your mind is only occupied by youwhen the only rabbits you see are the ones that everyone else can seewhen you are grateful it wasn't youwhen you don't have a set amount of hours with your best-friendwhen you can just 'pop in' to see your Mumwhen you don't need medication to make you happywhen you want to be in the here and nowwhen you hold onto others to keep them in your lifewhen you realise that your dress size doesn't affect your happinessBecause finally you can sit there and say 'this is why.' This is why you worked so hard. This is why they all had faith in you. This is why you kept trying. This is why you didn't die when you wanted to. And for the rest of your life (and it's going to be a long one) you will know that you have earned your place here on this earth. You worked damn hard for it and deserve to enjoy every single minute. Love yourself,Aimee