Resolutions Failed and Kept

I love making New Year’s resolutions. (I may or may not have a strategic life plan.) But this year, when I went to make my annual resolutions, I just wasn’t feeling it. As I re-read 2014’s goals, I found myself focusing on what I hadn’t accomplished. To be honest, I felt like one big failure.

But when I took a step back, I realized that I am never going to flawlessly complete all my goals. What matters the most is that I am making progress.

I saw the weight I hadn’t lost. But in reality, I am healthier that I was last year. We are now almost a 99% organic / GMO free house. We also rid our house of a lot of other toxins. Like all our old health & beauty products have been traded for natural ones; our cleaning supplies swapped for things like vinegar and baking soda; and our chemical filled medicine cabinet was exchanged for essential oils.

I saw the money we hadn’t saved. But we replaced several appliances, had a large hospital bill, several repairs done to the house and the car – and it was all paid for in cash. We hit our savings goals for retirement and college, and even put a little extra on the mortgage. Yup, I still have that pepto pink kitchen. But now I almost see it as a badge of honor versus an embarrassment. (When we do get it re-done, it will be because we really can afford it, and are paying for it in cash. Until then, pepto pink it will remain).

I saw the house that always seems to be a mess (we really do clean!) And then I had to just sigh, and realize that it was okay to let that one go. My house will be clean in 16 years when my baby graduates. But then it will also be ever so quiet. I just need to learn to lean into the mess.

I saw the lively family prayers that we don’t have. Yet, this past year we have been reading scripture to the children on a regular basis. During holy seasons, we often do so nightly. I have had more discussions with my son about God in the past year, than we did in the first seven.

I saw the monthly date nights we don’t have. Yet I don’t know that I have ever enjoyed my husband as much as I did this past year. He makes me laugh all the time. Even when I screwed up, and he didn’t get tickets to see Real Madrid (his favorite soccer team), he was ever so gracious.

I will be honest, I did accomplish all my career goals. But somehow, I still felt like it wasn’t enough. But then I remembered the week before Christmas, when on two separate occasions, I was told by co-workers that my office was their favorite place in the building, because it always was so calming. I looked around the room and saw the explosion of papers, the emails coming in faster than I can respond, the half eaten lunch, but they saw PEACE!

After looking at all that, I realized that I had accomplished more of my goals that I had initially thought. Yes, it wasn’t perfection. But then again, that never was the goal.

I am a Disciple who seeks to be continually growing in love, worship and service of God. This is the “lifetime set apart”.

I am Wife who strives to love, honor, encourage and serve her husband, her best-friend.

I am a Mother who seeks to raise her children to love the Lord with all their heart, soul and mind. A mother who teaches her children, so they are prepared to go into the world and live out the call on their lives.

I am an Encourager, who helps all those who come across her path to live a holy life.