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Mike Argento: The death of a big bird

"I'm sorry Jim. I'm gonna stop the subsidy to PBS. I'm gonna stop other things. I like PBS, I like Big Bird, I actually like you too."

- Mitt Romney at last week's presidential debate.

Big Bird, the gangly former star of the children's show "Sesame Street," was found dead in a seedy motel in Bayonne, N.J., last night, the victim of an apparent bird seed overdose. He was 42.

His body was found shortly after 8 p.m. when the motel's housekeeper went to the room that Bird had occupied for the past two weeks to change the newspapers on the floor and found Bird's body in the bathroom.

According to the coroner's office, a 100-pound bag of bird seed was found in the room and it appeared that Bird had choked to death while bingeing on his favorite treat.

"He sure did like his bird seed," said Aloysius Snuffleupagus, Bird's best friend from his days on "Sesame Street." "It's a real tragedy."

The cultural icon, who joined the cast of the PBS show when he was 6 and catapulted to stardom, had been struggling since "Sesame Street" stopped production, the victim of federal budget cuts. He is one of several "Sesame Street" characters who have fallen on hard times, most notably Count Von Count, who is still being sought by police in connection with a daring daylight robbery of a blood bank in Albany.

Bird is the second character to die since the show went off the air. Last month, Cookie Monster was found dead in his home, the victim of an apparent heart attack.

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He had been recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, the result of his lifelong addiction to Chips Ahoy chocolate chip cookies.

"The last few months have been hard on all of us," Snuffleupagus said. "Grover's doing stand-up in Rochester. Oscar's doing AM talk radio. I'm not sure what happened to Slimey the Worm. Last I heard, he was running for state representative in Pennsylvania. But Big, it was really hard on Big."

After the show was shut down, Bird tried to capitalize on his celebrity and years of television experience to launch a film career. He had landed several bit roles in indie movies, but was never able to make it to the next level of Hollywood stardom.

"He was a good kid," one Hollywood producer said. "But seriously, he was - and I hate to speak ill of the dead - kind of dumb. What kind of idiot believes the alphabet is one long word? Couldn't read a script to save his life. I mean, we put up with Cruise. But you know, you can only do so much."

Bird had worked briefly, getting several small television roles. He played the henchman of a meth deal in an episode of "Breaking Bad" and had a walk-on role on "Boardwalk Empire." His most notable post-Sesame Street credit was playing a corpse on "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit."

It was a sudden fall from grace for a character actor who had achieved stardom at such a young age.

His biography is sketchy. It is not known where he was born, nor who his parents were or even what species of bird he was. Several biographies list him as a domestic yellow canary. He later told interviewers that he was a golden condor. A flightless bird, he most resembled a type of chicken called a silkie.

His parents were out of the picture by the time he moved to Sesame Street, taking up residence in a nest with his longtime companion, Radar. He lived there for years while the show was in production, often turning down offers to leave the show for more lucrative opportunities.

"When I blew that pop stand to do features, I told him, 'Bird, now's the time. You gotta strike while you're hot.' But he was happy on the show," said old friend Kermit the Frog. "It was his life."

Bird struggled much of his life with a crippling bird seed addiction, which became worse, his friends said, when the show ended.

"It was sad," Snuffleupagus said. "He'd put bird seed in cookies, in milk shakes, in cakes, everything. That monkey was seriously on his back. We tried an intervention - Piggy even showed up - but he wouldn't listen. He just wouldn't listen."

The TV guest appearances dried up and Bird later tried to make a living by attending autograph shows, but those gigs dried up when organizers realized he couldn't write his name. He had signed on with "Sesame Street on Ice," a short-lived gig that ended when he tore an ACL during rehearsals.

At the time of his death, he was reduced to performing at children's birthday parties, something for which he was ill-suited because his appearance tended to frighten young kids and the only balloon animal he knew how to make was a wiener dog.

His last appearance in the media came a month ago when the website TMZ obtained video of Bird eating birdseed off of a hooker's buttocks. The video went viral and sent Bird into hiding.

Bird is survived by Radar and his grandbird, Granny Bird.

There will be no memorial service. As per his wishes, Bird's body will be donated to the Buffalo Wild Wings in West Orange, N.J.

Mike Argento's column appears Mondays and Fridays in Living and Sundays in Viewpoints. Reach him at mike@

ydr.com or 717-771-2046. Read more Argento columns at www.ydr.com/mike. Or follow him on Twitter at FnMike