We Don't Hate Cargo Shorts, But We Really Don't Like These Cargo Shorts

There was a period of time when cargo pockets were banned from the pages of GQ, whether in short or pant form. Slowly but surely they've crept back into our lives in slim, tapered styles that eliminate the baggy, school boyishness they're typically known for. We even included a pair of cargo shorts from cool guy label Off-White in last month's issue. So when we saw this Today article endorsing the style for its practical needs, we were skeptical, but not totally against the idea. That is until we saw the pair(s) in question. In short, let's just say they weren't what we had in mind.

Writer Doyin Richards defends his cargo shorts because, in his own words, "I stopped worrying about being sexy or fashionable as soon as crayons, potty training, finger painting and glitter glue came into my world." And while we understand that being a new dad means you have less time to obsess over the minutia of high fashion, simply choosing a slimmer pair of cargo shorts that don't border on capri-pant length isn't exactly haute couture. You're in pretty great shape for a dad—so why exactly are you wearing shorts for a man twice your size?

And Doyin, if you're really so pressed for places to put things like baby wipes and Band-Aids, might we suggest a bag? Whether it's a backpack or messenger or gym bag, it will keep you from looking like you've got a baby bottle-shaped tumor growing out of your thigh. Plus it will have lots more space to hold things so you're ready for any baby-sized emergencies. That's what will make you look really cool to your precious cargo.

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