Jordan Crawford

Well… Larry Sanders hasn’t had the best few weeks… The Colonel held his injuries from the field surgeon just long enough to keep hope alive in his troops, but had to undergo the knife to repair his thumb and will be out 6 weeks. Was it from a punch, the champagne bottle, or just getting too close in the delivery room? No one will ever know. Talk about easily the biggest fantasy bust this season thus far. With no IR spot, drop this dude. Zaza Pachulia is now a big pickup for anyone needing big man stats. Za/Za is such a good Scrabble play! Definitely a go-to for 60+ point moves on the triples. If you have the cajones to challenge me in Words With Friends, hit me up (user ID: Jbronze). But if I smell any Word Gen, I’ma publicly smite you! Oh yeah, hoops, John Henson gets a big boost as well looking at consistent run. But beware Henson’s terrible FT shooting and prepare thusly. Speaking of thusly, herebe the NBA beings-all I saw last fortnight (wait, doesn’t that mean like 20 days ago? Eh you know what I meant):

In a light slate of games, there were two premiere matchups with the Knicks at Celtics and Clippers at Mavericks. What game do I get highlights for? Timberwolves at Pistons. C’mon Gary! J.J. Barea looked good! Sigh.

The Knicks took care of the Celtics and apparently after being compared to Stevie Nicks in a major sports media outlet, have started playing like a team atop the East again. In the West, The Mavs needed overtime to knock off the Clippers with both Chris Paul and Dirk Nowitzki putting up 33 a piece. “Whatever you can do, I can do equal!” How communistic.

I’m starting to get really frustrated with those AT&T kid commercials where this douche asks four or five kids random crap, like “what’s better less or more?” or “would you rather be faster or slower?” In one of em he cuts the kid off who just wants to prove she can be funny like the convulsing three-year old too! He’s probably too buys doing blow with AT&T execs to have empathy. However, the way those kids act isn’t too dissimilar to how I would see NBA stars act in team meetings. Like imagine the same guy sitting with Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook ans asking, “what’s better, scoring more or less points?” “MOOORRREEEE!!!” in unison. Then Westbrook is like, “if you score more points you have more chance of being on Sportscenter and people will like you more and clown you less for singing along to Ke$ha in pre-game.” Clowned anyway! Good thing Westbrook is having an incredible season, including beating up the Lakers last night to the beat of his drum (if there’s a more apropos lyric from Ke$ha hell if I would know it) with a line of 15-29 FG 37 Pts 10 Rebs 5 Asts and 2 Stls. On top of that, only two turnovers. Even Kobe Bryant was givin’ props. If there was a Facebook throw down of NBA players claiming to be elite, this would be a good time for Westbrook to chime in. Let’s check out what else went down in a fairly light night of NBA action:

If you have been around the Razzball block, you may have seen my stuff as a regular writer for Razzball Football (along with Co-Host of the Razzball Fantasy Football Podcast with @NickCapozzi) and an occasional contributor for Razzball Baseball. If not, then I say hello Basketball world! I will be taking over the reins as the editor-in-chief for Razzball Basketball (while continuing my contributions to our other fine sports sections) and look forward to making different jokes about the same players. Get ready for numerous Sam Cassell looks like E.T. references.

You see many interesting things on New Year’s Eve, particularly on a train departing from New York. For example, I saw a group of Scottish people, two men, two women, approach a group of college students who had flipped the seats and were using them as footrests.

Isaiah Thomas got the start Friday night and scored 11 points with 4 assists, a steal and three 3-pointers in 29 minutes. The move to start him actually makes logical sense, which is strange since we’re talking about the Sacremende Kings here.

I don’t care who you are, if you are able to get a triple double then you deserve some praise. Well, unless it’s one of those triple doubles with 10 turnovers. Jordan Crawford has been inserted into the starting lineup and has been a plus player in just about every category (not FG%).

In Kyrie Irving’s first game back from injury, he helped the Cavs beat the Lakers. Surprised? You shouldn’t be, because the Lakers stink right now. Now a confession… the headline was lying. Now are you surprised? Irving punished the Lakers going 28/6/11/1 with four 3PM and shooting 11-21 from the field.

Alexey Shved scored 17 points last night in Philadelphia making it three straight 15+ point games (17, 16, 17) in a row now. He chipped in 4 assists, 3 rebounds, 1 block, and hit four three pointers. Not too bad for a guy who’s just 15% owned in yahoo leagues.

One thing I absolutely hate, I mean really despise, is when teams relocate. I think it’s a giant middle finger to fans and a blemish on the legacy of the team. That also leads to bizarre team names, like the Lakers in L.A.