"Demons Are Democrats."

from: "Alfred Rock"cache-mtc-ab11.proxy.aol.com

"Demons Are Democrats."
"Alfred Rock" of rural Kansas is a staunch supporter of
George Bush. That's why he has festooned his 2-acre yard
with Bush for President signs, right along the highway
where passing motorists can't avoid them if they want to.
Alfred, a widower who needs a cane to walk, has decided to
do everything in his power to get Mr. Bush re-elected. With
his yard full of signs, he feels he is doing his part.
"You know, the power of advertising," he told me in a phone
interview, "If I can convert just one person as they drive
past my home, I feel like I've made a major contribution to
the Bush campaign. Plus, I get a kick out of sitting in my
rocking chair and watching all those liberals get hopping
mad as they catch sight of my display. Some of those rude
folks give me a certain hand sign, but I just laugh and
wave back. I do this from dawn to dusk and then head back
in the house to watch the news until I fall asleep. One
time I nodded off after having removed the flag from out-
side the door. A couple of hours later I woke up to feel
Old Glory warming my body like the most patriotic lap
blanket in the world. I plumb broke down and cried."
But it was that very night that Alfred's signs were
attacked for the first time...
"It was like someone had cut through
there with a scythe. Three dozen signs were torn to
ribbons. I blamed pranksters at first, then decide that it
was the work of Democratic Party operatives. I called their
local headquarters to lodge a protest and received the most
surprising response. Even though they are dead set against
Mr. Bush, several of them volunteered to assist the
Republican folks in replacing the signs. I fixed them all my
homemade hard apple cider and ginger cookies using my
deceased wife's recipe. We had a great time, laughing and
singing patriotic tunes. I didn't think Democrats and
Republicans could get along so well."
But despite the coming together of the local political
community, the vandalism continues. Over 200 Bush for
President signs have been destroyed in Alfred's yard—even
though volunteers armed with hunting rifles patrol the
area every hour or so.
Says Alfred, "I've concluded that it's the work of a demon,
and I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Flesh and
blood human Democrats may be okay people, but when they
pass over to the Other Side, they revert to their true
demonic nature. I believe that a hard core Democrat who
was frustrated in this world, perhaps because he lost an
election, is lashing out from the spirit world against my
political signs."