This is whatever is on my mind, I am uninteresting, random and abnormal. I dont like the over use of apostrophes and spel check is overrated. I rarely re- read what I wrote so you might have to decode some of this. I am prob the laziest writer on here.
I am frightfully honest kind and female. I love morning coffee, morning yoga and morning wood any time of the day.
Have seconds.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

My Mouth is a Cookie Jar

CBJ. Courtesy Blow Job. A fav in my house. That time of the month brings a smile to my guys face. He calls it National CBJ Week. Declares it monthly. He also reminds me of it daily during the monthly menses.

I get the call out, hey babe, CBJ tonight? Text messages, emails, tit grabs, promises of lingering back rubs, arguments on how they are a job so it's good for the economy as well as a low carb alternative.

When we first started dating I told him about a friend who used to give her husband courtesy fucks. That is what she called them. He in turn told me about what he and his friends dreamed of; a courtesy blow job, a CBJ. They worked like this, the lucky sucker would come over he'd get a blow job and she would leave. He didnt have to do a thing. No poke in the puss, no dinner, no drinks, no nothing, kinda like a masturbation blow job with a partner! Once the job is over, bye, smell ya later! (These guys were dreaming, no one had actually ever got one)

When I met my romeo we lived about 2 hours from each other. I used to work a 3 day work week, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. (yes , I know, fab work week) So I call him one day and tell him to meet me at his house. He does and since we didnt see each except weekends, it was rare that I was there for a mid week fluid exchange. Being the exceptional dating partner that I am, he got the CBJ. Iwouldnt let him touch me, kiss me, fondle or hug me, this was after all, a CBJ. I left and didnt see him the rest of the weekend.

I dont think that this felt okay with him in the early stages of our romance. But I was happy to let him tell the story of actually getting the infamous CBJ.

Then came the time for a PCBJ- a Public Courtesy Blow Job. I was out with a friend and met him and some of his friends at a local out door bar for some professional day drinkin'. I was feeling rather frisky and accosted him from the mens room and made him sneak into the women's room for a PCBJ. He sat on the the tank and told him to be quiet. Well you know, when you are intoxicated you think you can get a way with anything. Ha! Caught with the johnson in the cookie jar! The meat head of the door guy, knew we were in there and made us leave. The blushing, smiling, walk of shame back to our friends.... They asked us to leave. It was fun and we all had something to say about the CBJ.

The boyfriend no longer feels weird about getting a CBJ, he also doesnet get 'em like he would like to, National CJB Week or not. But I am not against them at all. I think every guy deserves a little head without having to ask. What woman doesnt love to hear those words "You give the best CBJ -EVER. Now I need to RTJ, Rest the Johnson"