It’s called blast-lung, or the “hot chocolate effect.” As Lance said: “When you mix these speeds together in a frothy combination like the human lungs, or hot chocolate, it combines and it ends up making the energy go slower than it would in either one,” and it boosts the tissue damage.

I actually asked the researchers about masturbation. “...even if there was an increase [in masturbation], I don’t see a link to sperm decline,” they told me. “We adjusted for ejaculation abstinence time (which is a known factor associated with sperm count), so this factor did not bias the results.”