You gotta got a moustache

If you are over 65, and you are male, you just have to have a moustache. Look, you look like you’ve got a moustache–your upper lip looks just like it’s got a moustache, but you don’t really have one. How can we ever trust you? You’re in disguise! Hey, let that hair grow out, and come out as who you are: an old fart!