See Rock City

Monday, March 31, 2014

Finally a study that makes
sense.

The
brains of older people only appear to be less
speedy, because
they have so much information to access, much
like a full-up hard drive, scientists believe.

Elderly
people have so much information in their brain that it takes longer for
them to access it, scientific studies show.

Older
people do not decline mentally with age. It just takes them longer
to recall facts, because they have more information in their brains,
research suggests.

Much
like a computer takes longer as the hard drive gets full up, so to do
humans take longer to access information, it has been
reported.

Researchers
say this slowing down it is not the same as cognitive decline.

“The
human brain appears to work slower in old age,” said Dr. Michael
Ramscar, “but only because so much information has been stored over
time. Older people simply know more, so selecting a correct
choice from the trove of stored data may take a bit longer.”

Over the
past several months, Facebook has been reducing the organic reach of
Pages. A recent study found that companies' posts dropped from reaching
12% of their followers in October to just 6% by February

Facebook and its popular Pages platform have been a cornerstone
of most companies’ social-media marketing strategies for years. But if
the brands, organizations and celebrities that use Pages want to
continue to reach Facebook’s 1.23 billion monthly users in the future,
they’re going to have to pay up.

Over the past several months, Facebook has been reducing the
organic reach of Pages. Even if a person Likes a company or organization
on the social network, they’re unlikely to naturally see that Page’s
content in their News Feed. In a recent study of more than 100 brand
Pages, Ogilvy & Mather found that
companies’ posts dropped from reaching 12% of their followers in October to just 6% by February. The tech blog Valleywag reports that Facebook is planning to dial reach down to 1% to 2% of followers eventually.

Facebook declined to comment on the percentage of fans that see
posts from a typical Facebook Page (the last publicly disclosed figure
was 16% in the summer of 2012), but the company admitted
in December that posts from Pages are reaching fewer users. Facebook
attributes this change to increased competition as more people and
companies join its service. The typical user is inundated with 1,500
posts per day from friends and Pages, and Facebook picks 300 to present
in the News Feed. Getting squeezed out are both posts from Pages and
meme photos as Facebook shifts its focus to what it deems “high quality”
content.
The solution for brands with declining engagement, according to
Facebook, is to buy ads. “Like many mediums, if businesses want to make
sure that people see their content, the best strategy is, and always has
been, paid advertising,” a spokeswoman said in an emailed statement.

The transition to paid marketing on what has long been a
free-distribution platform may be a tough sell for some brands,
particularly small organizations or individuals who have built up
audiences over years. So far, though, pressing the screws to Pages
hasn’t hurt Facebook’s bottom line — the company generated $7 billion in
ad revenue in 2013, and research firm eMarketer projects that figure
will grow to about $10.8 billion this year. That’s good news for the
company’s investors, but maybe less so for the people suddenly being
asked to fund the social network’s financial growth.

It’s just a
fact of life in today’s world – there are people out there who want to
steal your things, and perhaps even hurt you and your family.

Whether
it’s from desperation or something more nefarious (such as a gang
initiation that randomly targets your family), your home is not the
castle it was in the past.

Here are some troubling points:

Deadbolts don’t help.
They can be “bumped” (a new technique that can unlock 90% of all
locks*). Or, in the case of home invasions, the invaders will just kick
the door in. No deadbolt can withstand a kick-in.

Fido is hungry. A piece of steak (or a bullet) takes care of your dog. Sorry, but it’s true. Gang members aren’t afraid of your dog.

A gun won’t help either
– A burglar will come when you aren’t home. And home invaders or gang
members expect (and may even want) a confrontation, and are ready with
their own guns.

Fake alarm signs are useless too – Criminals know your “electronic security” is a bogus sign. They go to Home Depot too. In fact, they know all the fake names.

However, criminals, gang members, and home invaders fear ONE thing:

And that’s getting caught. They do not want the police showing up when they are inside.

And there is only one way to ensure the bad guys know
the police will show up if they mess around with your home: having a
genuine monitored home security system with a name everybody knows.

Not
fake signs; not something you buy in the store; but a big national name
that criminals know by heart. A name that’s advertised heavily, and
says “the police will come immediately if you enter”.

One of the most common national alarm companies is ADT.
Companies like ADT, advertise heavily for two reasons. The first is to
(obviously) get customers. But the second reason is the more they
advertise, the more effective their systems are in preventing break ins
and home invasions. Criminals know the name, and avoid those homes
displaying the sign and stickers, because they realize the alarm system
is real, and has teeth.

Thus, the lesson is simple. If you want to
protect your home from criminals, go with a monitored alarm company
that you already know.

Quick question: did you get 8 hours of sleep last night? And even if you did, do you feel well-rested?

Don’t
feel bad – most people answer “no” to those questions. We’re all pretty
busy, so sleep is at a premium. It’s the lucky (and rare) person who
gets a solid 8 hours every night.

But even worse is the fact that
for many of us, the sleep we do get isn’t “good sleep”. And you know
what? That’s not healthy, and could lead to bigger problems.

If
you’re always feeling tired, get headaches for no reason at all, or
perhaps have high blood pressure and you can’t figure out why, you may
want to look at your snoring as a clue. Because snoring is the #1
symptom of a potentially serious health issue – Obstructive Sleep Apnea (OSA).

It’s no joke – snoring is serious

Yea,
yea yea, we’ve all seen the sitcoms of the wife muffling the snoring
husband with a pillow, and we laugh. But snoring isn’t funny – it can be
a serious health problem.

In fact, snoring and OSA can lead to
other health issues, such as Acid Reflux Disease, Memory Loss, Stroke,
Depression, Diabetes, Heart Attack, and more. Even frequent nighttime
urination can be the result of snoring and OSA

What is OSA exactly?

More than 18 million people suffer from OSA (all of them snore). OSA means you actually stop breathing at night
due to an involuntary muscular obstruction of your airway. This occurs
hundreds of times each night, causing you to constantly wake to catch
your breath.

But here’s the kicker – you don’t remember waking!!
So the problem goes untreated. You’re just tired all the time, buying
little energy drinks to keep from falling asleep at work at 2pm.

Sure,
you can go for a “sleep study”, if you have the time, and are lucky
enough to have the $5,000 bill covered by insurance (most don’t cover
this.) Then they’ll prescribe an uncomfortable (and loud) CPAP breathing
machine that you have to wear every night.

However, there is a
better solution. One that’s simple, comfortable, and affordable. It’s a
carefully researched high-tech chinstrap available from a company called
MySnoringSolution.

Proven Effective

A
recent case study published by Eastern Virginia Medical School’s
Division of Sleep Medicine in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine
concludes that wearing a simple chinstrap while you sleep can be an
effective treatment for OSA.

The chin strap from MySnoringSolution
works by supporting the lower jaw, which keeps the muscles and your
tongue from involuntarily obstruction your airway. But it’s so
comfortable that you won’t even know you have it on. You just won’t
snore, and you won’t stop breathing.

Instead, you’ll sleep. Deeply.

Thousands
of people have reported exceptional, restful results. They are sleeping
better, and their spouses partners sleep better too (no snoring tends
to make everyone happy.)

Right now, you can get the MySnoringSolution chinstrap for just $119.97. Plus, there’s a 100% money-back guarantee.

The “My Snoring Solution” Chinstrap is available exclusively from the company’s website
which is currently offering a special 2 for 1 deal. That means they
will send you two chinstraps for $119.97. Use one for vacation, maybe
give it to your spouse or that friend who you know snores. Either way,
it’s a great deal, and great for your health.

Get ready to be blindsided by a barrage of new taxes. $1 trillion worth…

They’ll be coming courtesy of the Affordable Care Act, otherwise known as Obamacare.

And
they won’t just be affecting those who make over $250,000. The bulk of
these taxes will be passed on directly to the middle class.

That’s
because while a majority of these “stealth taxes” were designed to be
taxes on businesses, they’re actually transferred directly to ordinary
citizens.

How much extra will you have to pay? To see how Obamacare taxes will directly affect your paycheck, go here.

They
include the investment income surtax, a Medicare payroll tax, even a
“tanning tax” on those who utilize indoor tanning services.

“Many
of those [hidden] taxes, especially those on hospitals, insurers and
medical device manufacturers, will ultimately be passed on through
higher health costs,” said Michael Tanner an expert on the healthcare
law.
In fact, analysts estimate Obamacare will cost the average taxpayer nearly $6,000 in extra taxes as early as next year.

Obamacare Tax Hikes Stoke Outrage

Many
of the Obamacare taxes are already in effect, others will hit January 1
2014. But they are already infuriating millions of Americans.

While
even Obamacare detractors applaud the requirement that insurance
companies cover pre-existing conditions and put a stop to lifetime caps
on benefits, they say these laudable benefits don’t compensate for the
bills high cost – especially in new taxes.

According to most experts, Obamacare will create a total of twenty new taxes or tax hikes on the American people.

In
fact, the Obama administration has already given the IRS an extra $500
million to enforce the rules and regulations of Obamacare.

The new
taxes don’t bode well for millions of middle-class Americans. Incomes
for the rich have soared this decade but middle class workers have seen
their wages stagnate and even drop since the 2008 Great Recession.

Many fear Obamacare with its high insurance costs and new taxes, could provide the middle class a fatal blow.

Of course, the Obamacare plan was primarily designed to decrease the number of uninsured Americans and reduce healthcare costs.

Many experts are saying it will have the exact opposite effect.

That’s just one of the reasons why Republicans hope to defund Obamacare before January.

They
claim that the taxes and costs needed to pay for Obamacare will crush
the middle class and most U.S. taxpayers, as well as trigger job losses
in affected industries.

Tax experts say you should try to estimate
how much you will have to pay when the law goes into full effect – and
take precautions to limit the damage to your bottom line.

What the Experts Say: How to avoid getting your financial neck broken by Obamacare… Watch this video.

One
expert, Dr. Betsy McCaughey, a constitutional scholar with a Ph.D. from
Columbia University, recently wrote a best-seller showing Americans how
they can not only survive Obamacare, but prosper through it.

McCaughey
claims to be one of the only people in the country – including members
of Congress – who has actually read the entire 2,572 page law.

Her
book, titled Beating Obamacare: Your Handbook for Surviving The New
Health Care Law, breaks the huge bill down into 168 pages of actionable
advice.

The book, written in an easy going, easy to read style,
shows some startling facts about Obamacare not seen in the mainstream
press.

For example, she points to a little known passage in the
bill that shows how you could get slapped with a $2,000 fine for not
having health insurance – even if you do actually have it.

She also goes into detail explaining how a third of all U.S. employers could stop offering health insurance to their workers.

In
one chapter, she shows how ordinary Americans will get stuck paying for
substance abuse coverage – even if they never touched a drink or drug
in their life.

According to McCaughey’s research, senior citizens will get hit the hardest.

Hip
and knee replacements and cataract surgery will be especially hard to
get from Medicare in the months ahead thanks to Obamacare, according to
McCaughey.

She warns seniors to get those types of procedures done now before Obamacare goes into effect January 1.

Real
facts and figures about the hidden Obamacare taxes and fees and how
they will affect everyday Americans and seniors are hard to find. As a
courtesy, Money Morning is offering readers a free copy of Betsy
McCaughey’s new book Beating Obamacare: Your Handbook for Surviving The
New Health Care Law. But only a limited number of copies are available.
Please go here to reserve yours today.

George Carlin (R.I.P.) was famous for being hilarious but also for being
in-your-face honest about the state of humanity and the planet. His
version of the lyrics for "America the Beautiful" are pretty halting. I
prefer the original song, but it's hard to hear it with my head in the
sand like this.

What this young girl lives through here is happening
in several countries around the world today. And children are often the
ones who suffer the most.

Could this happen where you live?

Three years since the start of the Syrian crisis, 10,000 children have
died and 2.3 million people have become refugees. Seeing this little
girl bear the brunt of the violence is a powerful way for the issue to
resonate with the public a little closer to home.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

You have two cows.Your neighbor has none.You feel guilty for being successful.Barbara Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICAN

You have two cows.Your neighbor has none.So?

SOCIALIST

You have two cows.The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST

You have two cows.The government seizes both and provides you with milk.You wait in line for hours to get it.It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE

You have two cows.Under the new farm program the government pays you|to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.You sell one, lease it back to yourself and doan IPO on the 2nd one. You force the two cows to producethe milk of four cows. You are surprised when onecow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analystsstating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.Your stock goes up.

FRENCH CORPORATIONYou have two cows.You go on strike because you want three cows.You go to lunch and drink wine.Life is good.

JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an|ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer,give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.

ITALIAN CORPORATIONYou have two cows but you don't know where they are.While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.You break for lunch.Life is good.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.You have some vodka.You count them and learn you have five cows.You have some more vodka.You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.The Mafia shows up and takes overhowever many cows you really have.

TALIBAN CORPORATION

You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two..You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature'sprivate parts. You get a $40 million grant from theUS government to find alternatives to milk productionbut use the money to buy weapons.

IRAQI CORPORATION

You have two cows.They go into hiding.They send radio tapes of their mooing.

POLISH CORPORATION

You have two bulls.Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.

BELGIAN CORPORATION

You have one cow.The cow is schizophrenic.Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.The cow asks permission to be cut in half.The cow dies happy.

FLORIDA CORPORATIONYou have a black cow and a brown cow.Everyone votes for the best looking one.Some of the people who actually like the brown one bestaccidentally vote for the black one.Some people vote for both.Some people vote for neither.Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell youwhich one you think is the best-looking cow.

CALIFORNIA CORPORATION

You have millions of cows.They make real California cheese.Only five speak English.Most are illegals.

Old age is no place for sissies.Bette DavisAge is a question of mind over matter.If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.Satchel PaigeJust remember, once you're over the hill,you begin to pick up speed.Charles Schulz"Don't worry about senility,"my grandfather used to say."When it hits you, you won't know it."Bill CosbyWrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.Mark Twain

Inside every seventy year old is a thirty five year oldasking, "What happened?"Ann LandersThe secret of staying young is to live honestly,eat slowly, and lie about your age. Lucille Ball

My parents didn't want to move to Florida,but they turned sixty, and it was the law.Jerry SeinfeldIt's no longer a question of staying healthy.It's a question of finding a sickness you like.Jackie MasonPut cotton in your ears and pebbles in your shoes.Pull on rubber gloves.Smear Vaseline over your glasses,and there you have it: instant old age.Malcolm Cowley

These three statements tell you a
lot about our government and our culture:

1. We are advised to
NOT judge ALL Muslims by the actions of a few lunatics, but we are encouraged to
judge ALL gun owners by the actions of a few lunatics. Funny how that
works.

And another statement for
consideration--

2. We constantly hear
about how Social Security is going to run out of money. How come we never hear
about welfare running out of money? What's interesting is the first group
"worked for" their money, but the second didn't.

Finally ..

3. The Food Stamp
Program, administered by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be
distributing this year the greatest amount of free Meals and Food Stamps ever
--- to 47 million people, as of the most recent figures available in 2013 .

Meanwhile, the National Park
Service, administered by the U.S. Department of the Interior, asks us "Please Do
Not Feed the Animals."

The stated reason for this policy is because "The
animals will grow dependent on handouts and will not learn to take care of
themselves."

This may just be the cutest thing in the history of the world, ever. A
Korean mother tries her best to teach her little girl an important
lesson about stranger danger, and the results are less than effective,
but more than adorable.

The cuteness never stops! Watch Korea's adorable Emmy-nominated "Pororo the Little Penguin" here in English or Korean.
It's no surprise that the video has gone viral in Korea.
Share it to see if we can get it to go viral internationally!

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Tinney and her husband used to sit in their living room and wave at the
students passing by on their way to school every day. After he passed
she decided to keep up the tradition. The students felt it was time to
show Tinney their gratitude for brightening their day all these years.

During a night dive last January at Gadren Eel Cove in Kailua-Kona,
Hawaii; a bottlenose dolphin caught in a fishing line approached scuba
diver Keller Laros for help.

The
dolphin’s left pectoral fin was stuck, wrapped around fishing line with
a hook embedded into its body. Laros, who was equipped with scissors,
was able to free his fellow mammal and the amazing rescue was caught on
film by Martina Wing.

Whether you’re a Democrat, Independent, or Republican….the second half of this email should make all of us very sick,

send this on …..especially the second half……

READ TO THE VERY END! VERY ENLIGHTENING!!! AND VERY DISTURBING!!!

By Dewie Whetsell, Alaskan Fisherman.

As posted in comments on Greta’s article referencing the MOVEON ad about Sarah Palin.

The
last 45 of my 66 years I’ve spent in a commercial fishing town in
Alaska . I understand Alaska politics but never understood national
politics well until this last year. Here’s the breaking point: Neither
side of the Palin controversy gets it. It’s not about persona, style,
rhetoric, it’s about doing things. Even Palin supporters never mention
the things that I’m about to mention here.

1. Democrats forget when
Palin was the Darling of the Democrats, because as soon as Palin took
the Governor’s office away from a fellow Republican and tough SOB, Frank
Murkowski, she tore into the Republican’s “Corrupt Bastards Club” (CBC)
and sent them packing. Many of them are now residing in State housing
and wearing orange jump suits The Democrats reacted by skipping around
the yard, throwing confetti and singing, “la la la la” (well, you know
how they are). Name another governor in this country that has ever done
anything similar.

2. Now with the CBC gone, there were fewer Alaskan
politicians to protect the huge, giant oil companies here. So she
constructed and enacted a new system of splitting the oil profits called
“ACES.” Exxon (the biggest corporation in the world) protested and
Sarah told them, “don’t let the door hit you in the stern on your way
out.” They stayed, and Alaska residents went from being merely wealthy
to being filthy rich. Of course, the other huge international oil
companies meekly fell in line. Again, give me the name of any other
governor in the country that has done anything similar.

3. The other
thing she did when she walked into the governor’s office is she got the
list of State requests for federal funding for projects, known as
“pork.” She went through the list, took 85% of them and placed them in
the “when-hell-freezes-over” stack. She let locals know that if we need
something built, we’ll pay for it ourselves. Maybe she figured she could
use the money she got from selling the previous governor’s jet because
it was extravagant. Maybe she could use the money she saved by
dismissing the governor’s cook (remarking that she could cook for her
own family), giving back the State vehicle issued to her, maintaining
that she already had a car, and dismissing her State provided security
force (never mentioning – I imagine – that she’s packing heat herself).
I’m still waiting to hear the names of those other governors.

4. Now,
even with her much-ridiculed “gosh and golly” mannerism, she also
managed to put together a totally new approach to getting a natural gas
pipeline built which will be the biggest private construction project in
the history of North America. No one else could do it although they
tried. If that doesn’t impress you, then you’re trying too hard to be
unimpressed while watching her do things like this while baking up a
batch of brownies with her other hand.

5. For 30 years, Exxon held a
lease to do exploratory drilling at a place called Point Thompson. They
made excuses the entire time why they couldn’t start drilling. In truth
they were holding it like an investment. No governor for 30 years could
make them get started. Then, she told them she was revoking their lease
and kicking them out. They protested and threatened court action. She
shrugged and reminded them that she knew the way to the court house.
Alaska won again.

6. President Obama wants the nation to be on 25%
renewable resources for electricity by 2025. Sarah went to the
legislature and submitted her plan for Alaska to be at 50% renewable by
2025. We are already at 25%. I can give you more specifics about things
done, as opposed to style and persona. Everybody wants to be cool, sound
cool, look cool. But that’s just a cover-up. I’m still waiting to hear
from liberals the names of other governors who can match what mine has
done in two and a half years. I won’t be holding my breath.
By the
way, she was content to return to Alaska after the national election
and go to work, but the haters wouldn’t let her. Now these adolescent
screechers are obviously not scuba divers. And no one ever told them
what happens when you continually jab and pester a barracuda. Without
warning, it will spin around and tear your face off. Shoulda known
better.

You have just read the truth about Sarah Palin that sends the
media, along with the Democrat party, into a wild uncontrolled frenzy
to discredit her. I guess they are only interested in skirt chasers,
dishonesty, immoral people, liars, womanizers, murderers, and bitter
ex-presidents’ wives.

So “You go, Girl.” I only wish the men in Washington had your guts, determination, honesty, and morals.

I rest my case. Only FOOLS listen to the biased media.

NOW If you’ve read this far ………………………………………..now

,open your eyes……….

First Lady Michelle Obama’s Servant List and Pay Scale

TheFirst Lady Requires More Than Twenty Attendants (Thats 22 Attendants to be exact)

1. $172,200 – Sher, Susan (Chief Of Staff)

2. $140,000 – Frye, Jocelyn C. (Deputy Assistant to the President and Director of Policy And Projects For The First Lady)

3. $113,000 – Rogers, Desiree G. (Special Assistant to the President and White House Social Secretary)

4. $102,000 – Johnston, Camille Y. (Special Assistant to the President and Director of Communications for the First Lady)

5. $100,000 – Winter, Melissa E. (Special Assistant to the President and Deputy Chief Of Staff to the First Lady)

6. $90,000 – Medina , David S. (Deputy Chief Of Staff to the First Lady)

22.
$35,000 – Jackson, Deilia A. (Deputy Associate Director of
Correspondence for the First Lady)(This is community organizing at it’s
finest.)

There has NEVER been anyone in the White House at any time
who has created such an army of staffers whose sole duties are the
facilitation of the First Lady’s social life. One wonders why she needs
so much help,at taxpayer expense, when even Hillary, only had three;
Jackie Kennedy one; Laura Bush one; and prior to Mamie Eisenhower social
help came from the President’s own pocket.

Note: This does not
include makeup artist Ingrid Grimes-Miles, 49, and “First Hairstylist”
Johnny Wright, 31, both of whom traveled aboard Air Force One to Europe.

FRIENDS…..THESE
SALARIES ADD UP TO SIX MILLION, THREE HUNDRED SIXTY FOUR THOUSAND
DOLLARS ($6,364,000) FOR THE 4 YEARS OF OFFICE????? AND WE ARE IN A
RECESSION????? WELL….MOST OF US ARE. I GUESS IT’S OK TO SPEND WILDLY
WHEN IT’S NOT YOUR OWN MONEY?????

Copyright 2009 CanadaFreePress.Com

Yes,
Yes, I know, The Canadian Free Press has to publish this because the
USA media is too scared they might be considered racist.

Why do black olives come in cans and green olives come in jars?
If someone leads but no one follows... are they just out for a walk?
Did Washington flash a quarter when asked for ID?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME stuff, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

How can something be 'new and improved'? If it's new what was it improving on?
If all of the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
Why do we say that an alarm goes 'off?'
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?
Do you realize how many holes there could be if people would just take the time to take the dirt out of them?
Have you ever wondered what the other side of your belly button looks like?
Once they figured out how to put food in a can, how long was it before they invented the can opener to get it out of the can?
How many parking spaces do you need to make a parking lot? Is it just a few or a lot?
Why can’t you break a bubble underwater?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Did
you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,
but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the
window?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why
do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to
give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When
we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping
cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?"
Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid
idiot?"

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something
that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else
over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?

Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

How come when you are driving through a neighborhood looking for an address, you turn the radio down?

How do the skittle company people know what a rainbow tastes like?

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

If a train station is where the train stops, what is a work station?

If knees were backward, what would chairs look like?

Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

If we're not supposed to eat late-night snacks, why is there a light in the refrigerator?

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?

If you mix milk of magnesia with vodka and orange juice, do you get a Phillip's screw driver?

Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

If your clone kills you, is that suicide?

Sooner or later, doesn't EVERYONE stop smoking?

What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?

What is a near-miss? If you nearly miss something, don't you hit it?

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?

If quitters never win, and winners never cheat, who's the idiot that said: Quit while you're ahead?

If we find life on other planets, what would happen to the Miss Universe pageant?

Does the fountain of youth and the fountain of knowledge come from the same fictitious underground stream?

The
owner of a golf course in Kentucky was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.
He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the
University of Kentucky and I need some help. If I were to give you
$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary thought a
moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."
You gotta love those Kentucky women.

Alabama:

A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's
for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering
under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others
asked." Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up
the trail," the successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out
there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded
the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"

Louisiana:

A senior at Louisiana State was overheard saying... "When the end of
the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana." When asked why, he replied
he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20
years later than in the rest of the civilized world.

Mississippi:

The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to
his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the
parking lot!" Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?" The young man
answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."

Tennessee:

A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

A
man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and
one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied
the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went
back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have
a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The
man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put "flares" in the
front and "flares" in the back. I never did understand it neither."

A Georgia State Trooper pulled a car over on I-95 about 2 miles south of the Georgia/South Carolina state line.

When
the Trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver answered
that he was a magician and a juggler and he was on his way to Savannah
to do a show that night at the Shrine Circus and didn't want to be late.

The
Trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if the
driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give him a
ticket.

The driver told the Trooper that he had sent all of his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.The
Trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his patrol car
and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler stated that he could, so
the Trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them to the juggler.

While the man was doing his juggling act, a car pulled in behind the patrol car.

A
drunk good old boy, from S.C., got out and watched the performance
briefly, he then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and
got in. The Trooper observed him doing this and went over to the patrol
car, opened the door and asked the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, "You might as well take me to jail, cause there's no way I can pass that test."

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

The
Obamas' trip to Africa for Nelson Mandela's funeral cost taxpayers $11
million while the president was only in the country for 13 hours

A 2013 trip to Africa for the president cost taxpayers more than $100 million

Michelle Obama, her daughters and her
mother plan a week-long solo visit to China this month that includes
meetings with China's first lady and high school and university students
- and that will likely cost U.S. taxpayers millions of dollars.

President
Obama and his family have come under heavy scrutiny for the
unprecedented high travel costs during his time in office - and a
week-long trip to China for four members of the First Family, members of
the Secret Service and other members of the White House staff will
likely cost several millions of dollars.The president's pricey travels have become so controversial that Judicial Watch
was forced to sue the Secret Service and Defense Department to get them
to turn over records on the amount of taxpayer money used to fly the
First Family all over the world - in many cases for vacations or
fundraisers - over the last two years of his administration. Far East: Michelle Obama and her daughters Sasha (left) and Malia (center) will travel to China this month

What the records show was startling.

According
to Judicial Watch, it cost more than $11 million for the president and
his wife to travel to Africa to attend Nelson Mandela's funeral in
December of last year. According to the New York Daily News, the Obamas
were only in Africa for 'less than 13 hours.'

But
that trip was nothing compared to a 2013 visit the Obamas made to the
Dark Continent, which reportedly cost tax payer more than $100 million.

On
the 2013 trip, some of the reported expenditures include the stationing
of a Navy aircraft carrier off the coast of Africa equipped with a
fully staffed medical trauma center, military cargo planes to fly a
fleet of 56 support vehicles to transport the Obamas - complete with 14
limousines and three trucks carrying bulletproof glass to cover the
windows of the hotels where the Obamas were to stay - and fighter jets
that flew in shifts to provide coverage over the president's airspace
for the entire trip.In June, the first lady went to Ireland for a two-day trip. The cost to taxpayers: $5 million.

Michelle
Obama reportedly stayed at a $3,300-per-night hotel in Dublin, and
needed to book 30 rooms at the posh Shelbourne Hotel for her staff and
security detail.

Expensive: Travel
expenses for the First Family have cost U.S. taxpayers hundreds of
millions of dollars over the last two years alone

For
two vacations the Obamas took in 2013 - one to Hawaii and one to
Martha's Vineyard - records show that it cost taxpayers a whopping
$7,396,531 in flight expenses alone. That figure also includes travel
expenses for the president's trip to California to file the Tonight Show
with Jay Leno.

During an
August trip to California, during which Obama attended a party held by
Democratic fundraiser Jeffrey Katzenberg and again appeared on the
Tonight Show, taxpayers paid more than $2 million in travel expenses for
the president and his security detail.The president will not be joining his family on what will be the first lady's first visit to the Asian economic powerhouse.In
an announcement Monday on the White House blog, the first lady says a
China visit is important because it is the most populous country in the
world, with more than 1.3 billion people, and is an important world
actor.Mrs. Obama will
travel from March 19-26, spending several days in the capital of Beijing
before stops in the central city of Xian and the southwestern city of
Chengdu, the White House said. Her schedule includes a meeting with Peng
Liyuan, the wife of Chinese President Xi Jinping.Tonight: Taxpayers footed the more than $2 million bill so Obama could appear on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno

Mrs. Obama missed meeting China's
first lady last June when the newly installed Xi, accompanied by his
wife, traveled to Southern California for a summit with President Barack
Obama. The presidential-level meetings were around the time of Sasha
Obama's 12th birthday, and the White House said Mrs. Obama stayed in
Washington with family.She
wrote a letter to Peng Liyuan welcoming her to the U.S. and expressing
hope that they would meet soon in China, the White House said.In
China, Mrs. Obama will focus on the power and importance of education,
including in her own life, during visits to a high school and a
university in Beijing, and a high school in Chengdu.She
recently began an effort to encourage America's young people, including
some of the most economically disadvantaged, to pursue a college
education. On past trips outside the U.S., she also has made the same
point to students from the host country. Mrs. Obama grew up in a poor
Chicago family, but earned degrees from two of America's best
universities.Africa: It cost taxpayers $11 million when the Obamas went to Africa for Nelson Mandela's funeral. They were there for 13 hours

In China, she will be accompanied by
daughters, Malia and Sasha, and her mother, Marian Robinson, who lives
at the White House. President Obama will not be on the trip; he is
scheduled to depart the U.S. later that week for stops in the
Netherlands, Belgium, Italy and Saudi Arabia.Mrs.
Obama is encouraging American students to follow her trip on social
media and the White House website, where she will post a daily travel
blog. In preparation for the trip, she scheduled a visit Tuesday to a
Washington charter elementary school with a Chinese-immersion,
international baccalaureate program.In
her blog post, the first lady said countries today are no longer
isolated and face many of the same challenges, whether it is to provide
students with a good education, combat hunger, poverty and disease or
address threats like climate change.'These
issues affect every last one of us, so it's critically important that
young people like you learn about what's going on not just here in
America, but around the world,' Mrs. Obama said. 'Because when it comes
to the challenges we face, soon, all of you will be leading the way.''That's
why everywhere I go, whether it's here in the U.S. or abroad, I meet
with young people to hear about your challenges, hopes and dreams — and
that's what I'll be doing in China as well,' she said. 'I'll be focusing
on the power and importance of education, both in my own life and in
the lives of young people in both of our countries.'History: First families going back to Richard Nixon have visited China
on diplomatic trips, including the family of Bill Clinton, seen here

Among recent first ladies, Laura Bush
traveled to China with President George W. Bush, and Beijing was the
place where Hillary Rodham Clinton made her now famous declaration at a
United Nations women's conference in 1995 that 'women's rights are human
rights.'Mrs. Obama's
trip will be a highly visible endeavor, but the fact that she's taking
the rest of her family suggests 'she's not going in search of a crusade
of one sort or another,' said Jonathan D. Pollack, a senior fellow in
the John L. Thornton China Center at the Brookings Institution think
tank in Washington. 'The clear intent here is not to touch any
particular hot buttons.'Mrs. Obama's previous solo travels outside the U.S. as first lady were to Mexico in 2010, and Botswana and South Africa in 2011.