Will my children be as passionate about Spanish as I am? I sure hope so…

I know it’s crazy for me to even think about this right now considering my kids are only 5 and 2, but it’s something I often wonder.

In fact, I’ve been meaning to write about this for a while, but then I got the February issue of Latina magazine which has an article titled Are we losing our Language? on the cover and I decided the time was now. Reading my friend Carrie’s post about it on the Tiki Tiki on Monday pushed me even more – mostly because of the comments she got there.

Although the poll in which she asks “How good is your Spanish” has clos to 60 percent of the people responding that it’s “perfectly fluent,” the comments tell another story. A story more representative of what the Latina article says the Pew Hispanic Center has fond: ”only 38 percent of third-generation Latinos — United States-born kids with foreign-born grandparents — are proficient in Spanish, compared to 79 percent of the second generation.”

Clearly, the longer Latinos have been in this country, the less Spanish they speak. So how will this affect my grandchildren who will be third generation Latinos?

I’d like to think that it won’t and that they will be just as bilingual as I am. But who knows?

So far, raising my children bilingual has been fairly easy. I hope you don’t get mad at me for saying that, but if you read this blog often, you must know that both Ana and I speak Spanish fluently and we’re married to Latino men whose first language – just like us – is Spanish. In other words, speaking Spanish is completely natural for us and although it’s true that we sometimes forget how to say certain words – thank God for Spanglish! – we are still 100% fluent. So speaking to our children in Spanish is truly not something we have to work very hard at – at least not yet.

While I envision some sort of rebellion against their heritage language at some point in their adolescence, I truly don’t think they’ll forget their Spanish because I’m already ensuring that they’re surrounded by it at all times. I mean, not only at home, but by traveling to both Peru and Puerto Rico as often as possible, as we did with my stepson who today is a completely bilingual young man.

But I also don’t kid myself. The reality is that – and I’ve said this many times before – the way my kids are growing up bilingual is completely different than the way I did.

I can only hope that I’m successful at showing them that speaking Spanish is a matter very close to my heart… the rest is completely up to them.

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LOL. I won’t get mad at you but I’m definitely jealous of anyone who is completely fluent and who doesn’t have to consciously make an effort to raise their children bilingual. I literally go to bed each night thinking about all the moments throughout that day that I had slipped into English and vowing to do better mañana.

The other night my 13 year old plopped down on the couch next to me so I could review his Spanish homework. Not only did he get to start Spanish a year before his peers, but the teacher is giving him “native speaker” packets with all the directions in Spanish.

Even though that gives both me and my son a sense of accomplishment, neither of us is naive of the fact that he is not at native speaker grade level – not even close.

I pointed to an incorrect verb conjugation in his homework, “Carlos y Ernesto TIENEN, not TIENE,” I told him. My son breathed a heavy sigh and said, “This is so frustrating. I hate that I make mistakes. I should know this. Why didn’t you teach me more? Why didn’t you speak to me in Spanish all the time?”

This is the question I’ve been dreading – and I very much understand any anger he will have at us because it is our fault and no one else’s.

I explained to my son that my Spanish wasn’t good enough to talk to him when he was a baby and that his father didn’t want to because he thought he wouldn’t learn English properly if he did.

“Daddy!” he said, visibly upset, “Why did you do that?! I could have been fluent!”

Carlos now feels incredibly guilty – and I told him for years that this would happen.

I’ve started to think it might be too late for my boys to be effortlessly fluent, but I will keep trying to speak to them in Spanish as much as possible – and I think Carlos will be ramping up his efforts as well.

As for whether our nietos will speak Spanish – I often wonder the same thing. I’m the great granddaughter of a fluent native Russian speaker/English bilingual, the granddaughter of a fluent native German speaker/English bilingual, and the daughter of man who was once proficient in Hebrew but lost it. I was taught none of these. Hopefully my grandkids will be able to say differently.

Ay, Tracy! Thanks for sharing that story. I can’t believe your son said that, but it’s not uncommon. Many times, kids grow up and realize they could’ve been brought up bilingual, but they weren’t and they want an explanation.

I think you and Carlos are doing the right thing. No need to feel guilty, I’m sure both your kids will be bilingual and taking them to El Salvador as often as possible will surely help make that a reality.

I love that your son is so intent on not making mistakes. Shows how important the language is for him too!

I totally get what you’re saying about all the languages your family spoke that were lost. I can only hope that because the amount of Latinos will only continue to grow in this country, there will always be a strong influx of Spanish here!

Tracy,
I think you have your own answer within your story… So much depends on willingness and attitude. Just this dynamic, that people CAN lose a language, proves my point. Your son sounds like he has no problem understanding that speaking a second language is cool, and good. That is not only half the battle– it’s maybe 90%, if you ask me. I was in my 30′s before I even started learning Spanish and now, people ask me how did I become fluent? My answer: I wanted it. Doesn’t sound like your son has any trouble with that part either.

My question was the opposite: Will they ever speak English correctly? We moved to the US two years ago (they were 5 and 7) and my goal was to keep talking Spanish to them at home. They were fluent and my husband also speaks Spanish. But, since I am homeschooling them, I thought they will be behind in their English. My English is not perfect! After two years here I have seen how they have acquired the English from their interactions with people and kids from church, baseball team, etc. in addition to their exposure to reading and tv and homework. So now I understand that they will be OK with English, probably a little bit behind than the native speakers, but their Spanish is excellent. They can communicate with their relatives in Puerto Rico and have a bicultural view of the world.

As you emphasize in this blog, the benefit from being bilingual today and in the future. So we are in the same boat…worrying that they get what they need to

I don’t think I’d ever worry about the kids learning a country’s dominante language because truthfully that’s what they will be surrounded with most of the time to the point that it make become overwhelming.

I’m glad to hear your kids’ English acquisition has been successful. And there’s nothing like having a bicultural or multicultural view of the world!

I’ve wondered the same thing time and again. Really. And like you only hope that my love for the language and culture will be learned by my children and then they pass this down to their children. Of course I find this much more difficult than you might, since I am married to a gringo, live in an area with hardly any Latinos around, and am the only person they are learning Spanish from. But I am a fighter and don’t give up easily. Hay la llevo!

As a seventh generation Tejana who has lived all of her adult life in California, I would say that the Spanish certainly does get lost on down the generational road. I grew up English only, often hearing Spanish but never participating in conversations as I felt lots of ambivalence toward my Mexican heritage. My Mexican-American parents spoke completely in English with one another. Yet my mother is completely bilingual as was my grandmother. But I guess that is because they lived in the very bilingual city of San Antonio. The only reason that I now have any knowledge of working Spanish is because I teach in a 90% Latino immigrant community in Los Angeles. I had to acquire Spanish for my job. The only chance I get to speak Spanish is with parents and with occasional domestic help.
My sister still lives in Texas and speaks no Spanish. Nor do many of the multi-generational Mexican-American peers I grew up with. I feel if anything that the attitude of the outside community which is often negative, coupled with little chance to speak Spanish in our daily lives, even here in Los Angeles (which is socially and linguistically stratified) contributes to incredibly fast Spanish language loss.

Mina, I’m convinced that where you live in the U.S. goes a way to how much Spanish you’re exposed to and able to retain. My niece, who was born and raised in Miami, recently told me that she’s convinced that the reason why she’s bilingual and bicultural is because of Miami. She feels that if she had been raised somewhere without as much Latino influence, things would’ve been totally different.

I guess the main issue for me is that, all bilingual, my parents and I are all immigrants, meaning that my children are really the first ones in our family being raised in the U.S. and I often wonder how much our native language and culture will dilute by the time it gets to their kids.

Thanks so much for sharing your story. I know a lot of people just like you here in Colorado.

I think hopefully things do seem to be changing. It wasn’t long ago Hispanic people were considered under Jim Crow – type laws here. Also, immigration and migration only seem to increase and increase, do not seem to slow down really, ever. Then, there’s technology and transportation. Kids today have more global perspective than even 1 generation ago. My 3-year-old is constantly wanting to be on YouTube watching Pocoyo and he cares not a fig if the narration is in some language I cannot even figure out what it is. I do think some narrow mindedness is just gonna go out of style… And people want the best for their kids, and being able to function in two or more languages is so beneficial.

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Alicia Maher was born in El Salvador and resides in Los Angeles CA since 1986. She learned to cook at a young age authentic Salvadoran food from her grandmother, great aunts, aunts and her Salvadoran friends. For almost thirty years Alicia has passionately carried and shared her country and ancestors’ culinary traditions with family and friends. In her cookbook Delicious El Salvador: 75 Authentic Recipes for Traditional Salvadoran Cooking, she sets out to preserve and teach El Salvador’s home cooking history, flavors and dishes to future generations. She is also the former owner of two full service bakeries in the Los Angeles area, and has taught private cooking classes for the last five years. Before moving to Southern California, Alicia lived in Israel and Washington, D.C. She graduated from UCLA in 1992 with a BA in Art History. Alicia has been married to Joseph since 1988; they are the parents of three sons. Delicious El Salvador: 75 Authentic Recipes for Traditional Salvadoran Cooking is her first book.