I love to discuss this scenario when speaking about networking with anyone who is interested in hearing my take….

You are at an after work business mixer – a cocktail party per se. You meet somebody for the first time, shake hands and exchange business cards. What would their body language be, and what would they say if the next thing you did was try and sell them something?

So why do so many people think this is ok to do when connecting online?

I could rattle off many examples when this has happened to me. I am stunned and bewildered every time. I am now less and less surprised because it is becoming more prevalent online.

Relationships take time to develop, and people typically only purchase from those that they know, like and trust.

Somebody can’t possibly have a hot clue what you are all about after you have just said “hello”. Most people would think you were an alien trying to connect for the first time offering your products and/or services.

Thank people for connecting when they confirm your “request to connect” via social media

Provide value

Get to know them, and actually listen to them

Connect them with like-minded people in your network

People will see right through you if you are only in this to sell. But if you put the focus on them, and show that you actually care about building long-term relationships, you will be much more successful when it comes time to present your offer.

Don’t just “barf”. That is just plain lazy!

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I spoke at a local Toastmasters Conference over the weekend and had a tremendous time! My discussion focused on the basics of Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, and how to use the social website “MeetUp” to attract guests to local club meetings.

When my presentation was over, I continued to chat with several attendees.

A couple of people took particular interest in what I was doing online with social media to build my brand. I recall comments like,

“You obviously don’t have kids. How could you do all this other stuff and work full-time?”

“What kind of day job do you have?”

“How much time do you spend on social media per day”?

They commented on their busy lives, and how utilizing social media to improve their future seemed nearly impossible.

I was getting nervous and was not sure what to say next. My instincts finally kicked in . I proceeded to say one phrase in a very confident (but non-confrontational) tone,

“How badly do you want it?”

“Actually I do have kids; a seven-year old and a 13 month old. I work full-time out of the house. We are as busy like most families, seemingly running all the time. But I make it all work. I have blogged for two years, spent at least 15 minutes per day building my brand most days over the past 3 years.

I focus on doing my “social media brand building” before the family gets up in the morning, or late at night. If it is on a weekend, I sneak away from them for short periods of time. The only reason I can commit to the crazy hours is that I LOVE WHAT I AM DOING!”

I continued to discuss the “Little Bit Everyday” mantra that I learned from Jeb Blount over at Sales Gravy.

I love the gym analogy. People think that they have to buy a gym membership and workout at least one hour per day to get in shape. Small chunks of time on a regular basis makes a difference as well. Some days I spend hours on my online presence, others only a few minutes. But I show up ALL THE TIME. You can’t start engaging with social media, get all excited, then disappear for weeks at a time. If I see profiles like that, I am gone!

When that conversation was done, one of the attendees said to me, “I never thought of it like that“!

I am happy the message resonated with them, once I explained balancing family life, and moving my consulting opportunities forward.

How do you balance everything if you are working full-time with a regular “day job”?

How much time do you spend daily on social media, blogging and building your brand?

What struggles do you face as you try to move your business forward?

Would love to hear your thoughts on this very important topic. Most people are struggling just to get through the day, and it would be nice to share ideas how successful people are able to manage all of their commitments!

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Dynamic and energized sales rep, mentor and leader since 1999. This blog will be about sales, social networking, personal branding, leadership, music and having some laughs! Don’t be surprised if I mix it up on occasion though, and talk about something totally different! I thrive on being part of successful, forward thinking teams. I am ready to go from the moment my feet hit the floor each morning, with the expectation that new adventures will be coming my way. It is rare that there isn't a smile on my face, as I take it all in, and have some fun along the way!