Monday, January 07, 2008

Lots of love, lots of drama, lots of soul-searching. I haven't posted in awhile because my family has been going through some crisis. I say my family, specifically I mean my son and his wife. It hasn't been pretty. But the good news is that I'm done.

Done in a good way. Done enabling and being the middleman for a grown man and his grown wife. Tomorrow, I'm going to call a much recommended counselor and make an appointment. It's time to shed my baggage, my co-dependent tendencies, much guilt and much anger. It's time to make some goals and see them through.

I have things I want to accomplish. Writing, for one. I want to be published in something other than a college literary journal. I have new, creative avenues I want to explore and many places to visit. I have daughters who are with me for only a few more years before they make their way out into the world. They need me to be on top of my game and I need me to be on top of my game. I need to see them, who they are. I've spent way too many years getting by, coping and missing out on the joy of life. Way too many years not believing in myself. Way too many years taking care of everyone except myself.