~ art,poetry,literature,observation

Monthly Archives: December 2016

From way back, even when I was very young and I tried to imagine where I would be in 2016, who I would be and how it would be I knew …I just knew…that 2016 was going to be a watershed year in my life as a woman, a person and a teacher. I knew that from here on inTime would be measured before 2016 and then after. It was an unbelievably hard year for me. I had blessings which cushioned the blows and the insecurities. I had my mother to help me through the dark hours of extreme anxiety and early morning panic attacks and I ALWAYS had my NooNoo at my side. My love for them knows no boundaries….its an infinite emotion.
I learnt about ‘inner core’ things and I watched how clever people played manipulative games. I witnessed how far a mother will go to gratify the expectations of her child. And I saw the debris left behind by emotional human conflict. These very real situations made me once more adhere more strongly than ever to the principle I often use….there is no absolute wrong or right…there is only a difference of opinion. Wrong or right walks hand in hand with moral and religious conviction. Moral and religious conviction is fashioned and formed by years of training as a young person. Who is to ‘blame’ or ‘praised’ for the adults people ultimately become? Who is definitely right or definitely wrong? While witnessing as I did some of these conflictive situations and watching the effect on the ‘victims’ I realised more than ever before what a precious thing Peace is. Peace in all facets of life. I saw how important it was for a child to be able to go to school in a sense of peace…not afraid of conflict. I realised what a priceless gift it was for the parent. Peace became my ultimate goal week after week. My spirit was stilled when I could listen to someone speak in positive directions of their daily lives. I also saw how very strong some young children are and how deep their faith is. I was humbled, for in their simplicity they taught me many things.

I am grateful to my Creator for the continued companionship and life of Beth (my mom). She remains my best friend, my worst critic and my strongest ally in all creative ventures. Those who know me well know how terrified I am by the endless Gauteng summer afternoon storms. This December it was bearable and that is only through the Creators grace. When I see the storm clouds gather I become frozen with fear and much aspirin is taken to ensure a smooth heart beat! …or at best a rhythmic one!
The passing of time is always to be mourned..even in a small way…Time is not something we can retrieve….not ever. I hope 2017 brings to everyone more stability within. More spirituality. Less violence especially within the family circle. More kindness towards animals and a better weather pattern. I am saddened for the loss of people I thought had more kindness within their persona….it hurt terribly in the beginning but it doesn’t matter anymore. We are in His merciful hands….may there be compassion from the Great Creator and judge….for He sees our hearts and most of all…our motives.