Contumacious

Woke up with a thousand of feelings is not good. When you just woke up, and there’s still something you can’t describe about the last day you open your eyes. It sucks. Why something that is so important for us has to be in our my mind for the last 5 weeks? Then, when you love someone, why just don’t you just let her/him be the way they are? Just, don’t blame them because they fall in love with you. Blame yourself. No reason why. Just blame yourself.

You know. It sucks. To falling in love with your best friend. I thought, it would be something good. But it wasn’t, at all. Random feelings, awkward feelings, scare of falling in love for more, all of them, sucks. People change because they know something new. Then falling in love is a new thing. And, people that we talk to with, change. Because of them. Sucks.

I sleep for 3 hours this morning. Thinking of something that isn’t good at all. You know, why don’t you just be kind with me and keep going on just like nothing happen to us? I don’t have any idea this is a karma. But for sure, I just can’t hold on this situation. Obviously, I ruined all of the things. I’ve to blame myself first, then.

People change because they want them to be. People change for a thousand of reasons. People change because of something. People change for a thousand of believes. People change because of people change. Indeed, they want to change themselves to be a better person. But you, you just a good person I ever met. Then why, why you change yourself?

And why people have to falling in love each other? Dammit. Sorry for the bad english.