DID YOU READ

Henry Winkler inducted into the Order of the British Empire, but he isn’t even the strangest member

Early this morning, The Hollywood Reporter broke the news that the once and future Fonz, Henry Winkler, has been made an honorary member of the Order of the British Empire. At first, we assumed the award was for the massive support he lent to both the leather jacket and pomade industries, but instead, he was honored for his educational work on dyslexia in the United Kingdom, which while nowhere near as awesome, is still extremely important.

All of this got us thinking though: If the Fonz got an OBE, what other surprising talents have been awarded the medal? So, after checking out a picture of the disconcertingly small Winkler with this award, thump the jukebox and check out these curious members of the “prestigious” Order of the British Empire.

Pierce Brosnan – In 2004, the actor received an honorary OBE for his “outstanding contribution to the British film industry,” which presumably covers all the time he fake-saved the country in “James Bond” movies.

The Bee Gees – We love the soundtrack to “Saturday Night Fever” as much as anyone, but does “Staying Alive” really justify being elevated to Commanders of the Order of the British Empire?

Rudy Giuliani – Just like the rest of the world, the Queen was apparently swept up in Rudy-fever in the wake of 9/11, honoring “America’s Mayor” as a Knight Commander of the Order of the British Empire.

Barry Humphries – From one Queen to another, Barry Humphries, best known for dressing in drag as Dame Edna Everage, was made a Commander of the Order of the British Empire.

The wrong Steve McQueen – Frankly, we don’t care how good “Shame” is, or even how long you get to look at Michael Fassbender’s dong in it. If it’s not the guy who raced motorcycles and was pals with Bruce Lee, then you’re honoring the wrong Steve McQueen.

Kylie Minogue – Yes, Kylie Minogue sang “Locomotion,” but she was the third person to chart with that particular song, and it didn’t even reach No. 1 when she sang it. May she live forever in the shadow of Grand Funk Railroad.

Olivia Newton-John – Olivia Newton-John getting the OBE makes a little bit of sense when you consider the amazing service she performed for millions of teenage boys by appearing in the music video for “Physical.” But her honor came in 1979, two years before the track was even released.

Gordon Ramsay – Apparently, what “services to the hospitality industry” really means is “going apoplectic about side dishes and shouting at people.”

Rod Stewart – The pop star was named a Commander of the British Empire in 2007, which indicates that no one in the Royal Family has been paying attention to what Stewart hath wrought since leaving The Faces.

Do you know of any other questionable appointees to the Order of the British Empire? Tell us in the comments below or on Facebook and Twitter.

Videos

Your Portlandia Personality Test

Carrie and Fred understand that although we have so much in common, we’re each so beautifully unique and different. To help us navigate those differences, Portlandia has found an easy and honest way to embrace our special selves in the form of a progressive new traffic system: a specific lane for every kind of driver. It’s all in honor of the show’s 8th and final season, and it’s all presented by Subaru.

Ready to find out who you really are? Match your personality to a lane and hop on the expressway to self-understanding.

Lane 10: Trucks Piled With Junk

Your junk is falling out of your trunk. Shake a tail light, people — this lane is for you.

Lane 33: Twins

You’re like a Gemini, but waaaay more pedestrian. Maybe you and a friend just wear the same outfits a lot. Who cares, it’s just twinning enough to make you feel special.

Lane 27: Broken Windows

Bad luck follows you around and everyone knows it. Your proverbial seat is always damp from proverbial rain. Is this the universe telling you to swallow your pride? Yes.

Lane 69: Filthy Cars

You’re all about convenience. Getting your car washed while you drive is a no-brainer.

Lane 43: Newly Divorced Singles

It’s been a while since you’ve driven alone, and you don’t know the rules of the road anymore. What’s too fast? What’s too slow? Are you sending the right signals? Don’t worry, the breakdown lane is nearby if you need it.

Still can’t find a lane to match your personality? Check out all the videos here. And see the final season of Portlandia this spring on IFC.

Last-Minute Holiday Gift Guide

It’s the final countdown to Christmas and thanks to IFC’s movie marathon all Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, you can revel in classic ’80s films AND find inspiration for your last-minute gifts. Here are our recommendations, if you need a head start:

Musical Instrument

Great analog entertainment substitute when you refuse to give your kid the Nintendo Switch they’ve been drooling over.

Breakfast In Bed

Any significant other or child would appreciate these Uncle Buck-approved flapjacks. Just make sure you’re not stuck on clean up duty.

Cocktail Supplies

You’ll need them to get through the holidays.

Dance Lessons

So you can learn to shake-shake-shake (unless you know ghosts willing to lend a hand).

Comfy Clothes

With all the holiday meals, there may be some…embigenning.

Get even more great inspiration all Christmas Eve and Day on IFC, and remember…

Celebrating Portlandia One Sketch at a Time

Most people measure time in minutes, hours, days, years…At IFC, we measure it in sketches. And nothing takes us way (waaaaaay) back like Portlandia sketches. Yes, there’s a Portlandia milepost from every season that changed the way we think, behave, and pickle things. In honor of Portlandia’s 8th and final season, Subaru presents a few of our favorites.