Heart-shaped Chag?

A debate broke out recently between the camps of The Rebbetzin Rocks and my wife (on one side), and myself and Rebbetzin’s husband on the other. The disagreement? Whether or not Valentine’s day is observable from a Jewish perspective.

Turns out that Rebbetzin’s Hubby is staunchly anti-V-Day, along with Halloween, St Patricks day and a few others.

So I’m offering this token of male solidarity. It doesn’t mean I think it will help though. As Gertie Giggles famously said in the second Spy Kids movie “You’re fighting a girl. You’re gonna lose”. (OK, I admit that maybe the second Spy Kids movie is only famous in my house.)

In any case, I owe a tip of the Kippah to Rabbi Joe Black for penning this great song- “Valentine’s Day is Not a Jewish Holiday“, which can be found on his album Sabbatical:

Valentine’s Day is not a Jewish holiday.
That’s why I didn’t buy you flowers.

I was thinking just of you,
I know you’re proud to be a Jew.
It’s a most confusing 24 hours.

No I can’t be what I ain’t,
and a day named for a saint
doesn’t seem to be a kosher celebration.

Oh but when Purim comes we’ll nosh
on special heart-shaped Hamantashen
and drink Mogen David wine for our libation.

It’s a Hallmark holiday,
that is all that I can say.
I don’t know why you think it’s so essential.

Besides at 80 bucks a pop
a dozen roses doesn’t sound so hot
what’s the point of getting so sentimental?

No I didn’t buy Godiva’s,
’cause the increase in your dress sizes
from eating chocolate makes you weep and makes you wail.

So open up the bedroom door,
don’t make me sleep here on the floor.
I’ll buy perfume for you next week when it’s on sale!

3 comments

It was great to find a woman who never cared about Valentine’s Day. Abby and I have never celebrated it since knowing each other. Now forgetting about Feb 15, all hell would break loose. Unfortunately, I am too busy with other things, like graduating, to celebrate it tomorrow. Someone, help me!!

This is a question? This is a controversy? SAINT Valentine’s Day? Really?

Indefensible. (Notice I didn’t use the word “inexcusable” because I don’t believe there is such a thing.) No offense, but what can a Jew say that makes it OK to observe a day that is named for a Roman Catholic saint?

Oh, and the standard answer (used regarding Valentine’s, Halloween, Christmas, New Years, and probably Epiphany and Whitsunday) – that these are no longer religious holidays – provokes from me two answers: “Yes, of course they are, and Christians need to step up and reclaim them” and “So what? Do you have that much disposable income that you need to take what were formerly Christian holidays and succumb to the pressures of marketers and spend for no reason other than to keep up with your neighbors, when there are worthwhile charities and Jewish observances on which that money would be better spent?”

Why this is even a debate is beyond me. Why Jews are so eager to find reasons to celebrate other people’s holidays baffles me – as well as why Jews don’t take more interest in their own celebrations.

In fact, People of all religions, I challenge you this way: Take back your celebrations to your bosoms and return them to what they are supposed to be. Learn what the days mean, celebrate and commemorate them as they should be. Put away your wallets and open your hearts. Jews and Gentiles alike: let’s see you bring back the holidays as they should be.