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Hi. First time host, longtime carnivalgoer. I’ve got a long history with carnivals, a childhood pockmarked by backwoodsy affairs, rickety rollercoasters held aloft by nothing more than the diligence of a ten-year-old in a polo shirt, caramel apples staining t-shirts and claiming baby bicuspids for their own. There are stories. All of them end with a somber, tear-streaked car ride home. None of them are worth our time.

It is worth our time to mention that for all of these reasons my therapist suggested I host a blog carnival. Baby steps.

Without a firm stance on personal technology now, a school positions itself for even more trouble in just a few years.

Matthew K. Tabor writes in opposition to cell phone use in class, drawing conclusions from both personal experience and a St. Petersburg high school survey. All available evidence suggests that Tabor was picked on as a child by a fire-breathing anthropomorphic cell phone. No stranger to childhood trauma myself, I wish him a speedy recovery.

Todd Seal, on the other hand, offers his steeliest glare to any camera-phone-having student looking to catch him compromised and advises her to “bring it.”

Textbook Evaluator (née Mark Montgomery) takes lesson-plan repository Curriki apart piece by piece in an excellent post subtitled How Long Will It Last.

From the homefront:

… how long will it be until all under 18 persons are swarthed in bubble wrap 24/7?

The Science Goddess wonders how we survived to adulthood and pitches a case against car seats, safety belts, bicycle helmets, and rubberized mats. Thankfully, she gives roller coaster safety cages a pass.

Guest expert Maurice Arthur discusses student motivation in the home and ties it all to the “trouble threshold,” which sounds a lot like a carnival ride I wouldn’t have enjoyed as a boy. Moving along.

Little Mummy rejects education’s “all or nothing” approach to homeschooling and public schooling and proposes a partnership.

Ms. Q’s child complains that all they do in class is party and eat junk food. I mean I went to those parties in college and can vouch for the fact that they never stop at junk food. So, good for Ms. Q’s kid. And good for Ms. Q for pursuing the question: when do you know the education system is not doing enough for your child?

Cindy, over at Life Without School, pens an ode to homeschooling and offers several choice resources.

From the faculty lounge:

This group of kids, the non-Losers so to speak, are starting to get absolutely, totally, irrevocably pissed off at the Losers. They are ready to revolt.

On class management, Mrs. Bluebird’s an absolute pro. If the complex social interactions of middle schoolers pique your interest even slightly, you’ve got to check out her concise transcription and deft analysis of a particularly trying week.

Math coaches, the union reps who love them, and the teachers who don’t, all at I Thought A Think.

Peter Stinson is like the prettiest girl at the ball, simultaneously courting Saint Swithins-in-the-Berkshires and Saint Swithins-Along-the-Big-River and blogging all about it at Chronicle-of-a-Search-on-Blogger.

The Median Sib offers a playground anecdote which culminates in a corny punchline. And by corny, I mean, Children of the Corn-y.

If the little ones have been getting ya down and givin’ ya the blues what with how hard it is for them to sit still and just identify a verb, NYC Educator’s got the remedy: a harrowing recap of a student’s assault and battery, with a bonus question just for spine-tingling’s sake: when do you call the police?

The less accurate information given in a sex education class, the better, because what kids don’t know about sex can’t hurt them.

Jon Swift and Mark Barnes both strap in for a ride on the Tilt-A-Whirl and a debate of abstinence education. Barnes applauds seven state administrations that have rejected abstinence funding while Swift constructs a modest proposal involving storks, lies, cybersexually transmitted diseases, and damn lies.

The NCLBlog tracks two points in NCLB history: its origin in Texas’ Senate and Bill Ratliff’s recent rebuke of the same law he helped promote while serving as that Senate’s education chair.

Bill Ferriter believes in Rewarding the Right Knowledge and Skills rather than granting higher pay to teachers who take courses of middling value to their teaching, a sentiment which, heck, I’m all for, so long as “Right Knowledge and Skills” is a one-unit quickie Internet course. It is, right?

From the university:

He’s also about as white as one could be. And I don’t just mean in skin color.

White students marking “Hispanic” on college applications? Blond Venezuelans claiming ethnic heritage despite a loose ethnic connection? Up is down and black is white says Right on the Left Coast.

Super Saver, a Princeton interviewer, delineates his three criteria for evaluating candidates. Strangely, bribery is nowhere among them.

From the muckracking and miscellaneous files:

I’ve been trying for over a year to resign from the New York City Department of Education.

Just when Miss Dennis thought she was out, they (tried to) pull her back in. Someone at the DoEd obvious likes what they’re reading at Your Mama’s Mad Tedious.

Mr. Lawrence hosts an impromptu survey of substitute teacher pay across the country. The results seem more or less in, with the median pay hovering somewhere around $Not.Enough, but the commentary isn’t any less fascinating.

Parentalcation hosts a cagefight between Teach for America and Troops to Teachers using Googled surveys to referee the carnage. He’s edited this one down to suit the discriminating and sensitive constitutions of our carnivalgoers.

IB a Math Teacher compiles a list of education lingo bingo useful to stay alert during staff meetings, national conferences, and long drives in the family station wagon. That last one’s probably a dumb idea.