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Two and a Half Men Review: "Ixnay on the Oggie Day"

Charlie's back! After a season of seemingly losing his cajones to Chelsea, Charlie went back to his old womanizing ways... with Chelsea's best friend, Gail (Tricia Helfer) of all people.

Not only did Charlie manage to sleep with Gail, but did again after Chelsea called wanting to get back together with him, and again after they broke up. "How much madder could she get?"

As much as we were glad to have the bad boy Charlie back, the episode still didn't provide the laughs of previous seasons. We're hoping after the show returns after Sheen's stint in rehab, it brings back some of the witty dialogue we're used to.

At least Alan's plot line provided a hilarious interaction with his mute receptionist and we got to see Jake actually looking normal for once. Our favorite Two and a Half Men quotes from the episode after the jump.

Charlie: Why'd you change your friggin hair? Alan: My girlfriend asked me to. Charlie: If your new girlfriend asked you to jump off a bridge, would you? Alan: If she put her tongue in my mouth while she asked me... Charlie: I can't blame you. I once bought a woman a car for the same reason. Alan: She put her tongue in your mouth? Charlie: Sure. Let's say mouth. | permalink

Alan: Let me get this one. Charlie: Really? You're not going for the world record? Alan: What are you talking about? Charlie: 1647 meals in a row where you haven't taken your stupid velcro wallet. Alan: You were counting? Charlie: Was I close? | permalink

Charlie: What is that? Alan: A portable massage table. Charlie: So what are you giving rub and tugs on the pier now? | permalink

Chelsea: I should never have let you go. Charlie: Sometimes you can't appreciate what you got until you go to Mexico and don't have sex with a momma's boy. | permalink

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Charlie: Why'd you change your friggin hair?Alan: My girlfriend asked me to.Charlie: If your new girlfriend asked you to jump off a bridge, would you?Alan: If she put her tongue in my mouth while she asked me...Charlie: I can't blame you. I once bought a woman a car for the same reason.Alan: She put her tongue in your mouth?Charlie: Sure. Let's say mouth.

Alan: Let me get this one.Charlie: Really? You're not going for the world record?Alan: What are you talking about?Charlie: 1647 meals in a row where you haven't taken your stupid velcro wallet.Alan: You were counting?Charlie: Was I close?