Lom Henn

Bad writing about bad sports writing.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Week #4 NFL Picks

Yes, we're back with more Nostradumbass picks for you to head to Vegas and possibly lose your shorts!

It seems like I am on some sort of a roll here. I guess the voices in my head are telling me some good things right now. Not sure if the streak is going to continue but I going to enjoy it while it lasts.

Last week: 5-2Overall: 9-5

Vikings (-1.5) over Chiefs

Saints (-7.5) over Jaguars

49ers (+3.5) over Eagles

Seahawks (+4.5) over Falcons

Chargers (-8.5) over Dolphins

Ravens (-3.5) over JetsColts (-9.5) over Bucs - Think the Colts are finally going to turn the corner this week and get one in the win column on MNF. Painter is going to shine in the spotlight. No I don't expect him to be Peyton Manning. I do expect him to be more comfortable in the offense and do enough to help the Colts win while not committing some of his previous mistakes.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Week #2 NFL Picks

Welcome back Vegas betters! The Z-man will be taking temporary control while O'Hoolix is on... paternitity leave? Do furry space alien mascots get paternitity leave? Anyway, the O'Hoolix clan have welcomed a new little alien to this world to help battle the evils of the sports writing world as well as enemy terrorists. Congrats, O'Hoolix! I hope my picks fare better than yours!

Now on with the show.

I was not able to get the picks in last week, but that was probably a good thing as they did not turn out very well. However, like the Colts, I expect to turn things around and do some crushing this week!

Speaking of the Colts (+2.5), I expect them to cover and win outright against the Browns at home. The Horshshoes will not have a meltdown like last week and will have some some of the line deficiencies, both O and D, solved. Expect Freeney and Mathis to do some damage and pressure the Browns into an interception or two.

2011 NFL Predictions

Yeah, I know this is a week into the season, but these picks were done before the season, I just did not get the chance to post them until know. Although based on previous seasons, it probably would not have made much of a difference.

The rest of the gang may post their predictions as well. It is always fun to see the differences but many years the majority of us have the same Super Bowl winners. Unlike most pundits, we chose the final positions of each division as well as the wild card playoff teams. Then we pick the expected winners of each playoff game through the Super Bowl.

Don't scoff to much at our picks. A couple of years ago, Slut out predicted most of the 25 "experts". Check it out!

Yes, the Redskins and Lions picks may be a bit out there, but there are always some surprises every year. It was also hard not to pick the Colts and while I think they still have a shot at the playoffs, I think they will fall just short of making it...even if Manning comes back in time.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Your Week #2 Chicken Little Checklist

2. Sign a replacement QB who was retired to be the starter because the guy who was your backup has a regular season QB rating of less than 10 and should not be allowed anywhere on the playing field.

Check!

3. Complete #2 less than three weeks before the regular season starts.

Check!

4. Go out the first week and lay a craptacular egg against a division rival.

Check!

5. If your a season ticket holder you should immediately go out and sell your tickets to all future Colts games.

Che...WTF!

Well, according to WTHR in Indy, they seem to think that Colts ticket holders will be jumping ship now that the team is facing a different kind of adversity we haven't had to face in quite a while.

INDIANAPOLIS - A blowout loss in the first game could prompt Colts' season ticket holders to sell or give away some of their tickets.

WTF! REALLY! Do you really think the sky is falling at this point? While the blowout loss to Houston was a tough one to swallow, it was also a page out of the Worst Case Scenario book. I don't expect Kerry Collins to have the same issues in the first quarter of the Browns game and end up in a 17-0 hole after one quarter.

And considering this weekend's game is the first home game, I don't think most ticket holders are in a hurry to try and make some cash versus seeing the game.

If we are 0-8 at the mid-season point, then we'll have a different story altogether.

It's more than just a first game loss. The first game without Peyton Manning in which the team barely showed a pulse might turn into an opportunity.

Again, see my previous point.

"I thought it was bad," said Brian Williams.

I thought he actually said, "I thought is sucked donkey balls!" But it is broadcast TV, so they had to clean it up.

Ticket brokers say it's a little early for a mass exodus but with the Cleveland Browns coming to town it could be a bellwether game. If the Colts play poorly again this weekend, the hometown faithful may decide to take advantage of the Steelers visit the following week, since Pittsburgh fans are known to travel well.

So basically you already proved you are jumping the gun with this article.

"Pittsburgh is a good traveling team. They can't get tickets to their own stadium, so a lot of times they go on the road. They got a lot of fans that travel, so we are still seeing a lot of demand for that game," said Kyle Kinnett with Sport Events.

This is actually true and was proved in the playoff game in 2006. Fans thought we would walk into the next round and people made a few bucks. Oops!

But some Colts fans aren't so quick to get rid of their tickets.

No shit, Sherlock!"No, I wouldn't sell them. Not to them, no. No, I don't think I would sell them at all," said Shari Jordina.

I think this is what most season ticket holders are saying. If you are that quick to sell your tickets before the first home game, then you are probably not much of a Colts fan in the first place.

On the Eyewitness News Facebook page, reaction was much the same Monday.

"I don't have them, but if I did, I would still be at every game. I'm a true blue bleeder, no matter the time. Standing behind a time that has taken us farther than I ever thought possible," said one fan, Gloria.

"Anyone who sells their tickets just because the #1 QB is out hurt is not a true Colts fan," wrote another fan, Rhonda.

Wham! Wham! Wham! (Sound of my head hitting the desk)

For now demand is steady, but there is a crack.

There are still plenty of fans who want to see a Colts game. With or without Manning. Even if the Colts are 0-8, I'm still going to go to a game and have a good time. It is all nice when your team wins, but you tend to take with you the overall experience of the game. The atmosphere, the camaraderie, the lighter wallet and the cheering are all part of going to the game.

"Demand is definitely the same. The prices have dropped a bit. I would liken it to when the economy took a dive a few years ago - predominantly our business was corporate America, corporate America, corporate America and the price was high. When that happened, the pricing came down and gave the opportunity for fans and people who haven't been able to attend these events in the past the opportunity to go. It's the same; I mean, it's a good team. It's a team sport. Prices are down but it's giving the opportunity to fans who couldn't afford to prior the opportunity to go now," Kinnett said.

Dude, the prices have dropped because your franchise player is not playing. It's not like trying to sell tickets to the Brickyard 400. You still have plenty of people who want to go see the Colts. However, since you are not sure what kind of play you are going to see at this point, you are not going to get the top dollar you were getting in previous seasons.

If you normally don't have the opportunity to attend Colts games, this could be your year. Tickets are going for face value.

And that is not necessarily anything new. When I checked Stub Hub there were some going for under face value, but they were the upper level sideline seats in the upper rows. Not sure why they are charging $69 face value for those seats, but they were selling in the mid-$40's. The cheap end zone seats were going for a few bucks over face value. So, like any event, there are some bargains. It's not like it is a pre-season game where you can't give the tickets away.

"It was tough to watch, but I would give them another chance. They are our Colts, so we have to give them a chance," Jordina said.

It's not like you're going to a game and being forced to watch Ishtar or Nothing But Trouble! The Colts are going to win games this year. The Colts are going to lose games this year. Kerry Collins will get more on track and the rest of the team will buck up and actually start showing up. It is not time to throw in the towel and play for a high draft pick. We do not know how long Peyton will be out. If the Colts can hover around .500 and Manning can come back after 8 games, then they may still have a shot at the playoffs.

Even without Manning for the season, the AFC South is winnable for the Colts. I'm not giving up on them yet, and it looks like most fans are not ready to either.

WE WERE ON A BREAAAK!!!!!!!!

Okay, so nothing like taking seven months off! (Or more for some of us!) I know that life sometimes gets in the way, but seven fucking months! REALLY?!?!?

Yes, we are totally ashamed of ourselves. But hey, we still live in a basement in our parents' houses. Do you think were more ashamed to have ignored our fans (all half dozen or so of you) for the past several months compared to living with our parents? HAH!

Not sure about the rest of the gang, but I guess we have let the fucktards of the sports world get away with too much and it is time for LomHenn.com to put its proverbial foot down!

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A lot has happened since our last post in February. The Butler Bulldogs went to the Championship game in the Final FourTM for the second straight year. (Well done!) Dan Wheldon won the Indy 500. Tiger Woods came back...sucked...left again...came back...still sucked...missed the PGA fall playoffs. Cardinals did a mid-summer "flan in the cupboard" impression. The NFL lockout came to end just in time. The NBA lockout will most likely not end in time...no real loss there, in my opinion. And Bob Kravitz is still writing for the Indy Star...sadly. At least he is still not on the radio!

And now the NFL regular season has finally started. WOOOHOOOO! And to make things real interesting for Colts fans, Peyton Manning will miss at least a majority of the season. Not the way I really wanted to liven up this season! It has been interesting to see and hear the various pundits call for the demise of the Colts without #18. True, the Colts are not as good offensively without Peyton, but they still have several Pro Bowl players on the team. One game does not a season make!

So no guarantees that we will not have another seven month gap in our posts, but with football season on the go, I'm pretty sure we can scratch up a few posts here and there.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Super Bowl Pick

PACKERS -3PACKERS/STEELERS ovr 44.5

The Cheese are Hot! Give the 3 in this spot. Pittsburgh does have a tough D, but Rodgers and the Green Bay attack should be able to move the ball. The Pack running game should be able open the play-action for Green Bay.

The Pack D will get to Big Ben, O'Hoolix calls for at least two Steeler interceptions. The Steelers limped into this game and the Cheese will be too much for them. Green Bay 28-20.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

NFL Post Season

O'Hoolix took last week's games off to tend to some very serious alien business by a very serious alien. Now, I am back and here are the winners for this weekend.

GREEN BAY -3.5: Take the Cheese in this spot, the Bears have a very good D, but have over-achieved this year and got a gift with the Seahawks in round 2. The Packers are very hot right now and Rodgers should have a decent game to go with the Packers ground attack. Look for Cutler to show his true colors and have multi-pick game, especially if the Bears get behind early.

NEW YORK JETS M/L +170: Again another team scalding hot here. The Jets have been lucky all year long winning several games in the last minute. The playoffs have been no different, they were given a game by the Colts and their coaching, the Patriots just were a fraud at 14-2 and now for the Steelers. The Jets are riding high and their D is playing very well. Look for this to be a close one, but the Jets are a team of destiny.

Bonus Pick: GREEN BAY to win the Superbowl +120: I like the Cheese to take the Lombardi back home. Their D is up to par and the have the best QB left in the post-season(although Rothlisberger might have something to say about that). If you have some extra dough to invest, take the plus money here and lay it on the Pack.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

NFL Playoffs

10-17 last two weeks63-86-1 overall regular season record

The last two weeks of O'Hoolix's season was similar to the last six weeks......miserable. At least the playoffs are here and O'Hoolix's record is now back to 0-0. O'Hoolix will get his groove back, NUFF SAID!

NEW ORLEANS -10: Giving 10 points on the road usually is not a path to success, but the Seahawks are bad, the Saints D will shut down the Seahawks.

INDY -2: The Jets have been talking just enough to really piss Peyton Manning off. Everyone thinks the Jets D is good, but you give up 38 points to the Bears and get shredded in the air, I like the Colts to put up a big number here, 33-27 Colts.

JETS/COLTS ovr 44.5

BALTIMORE -3: Ravens too good here. The Chiefs are improving as a team, but the loss to the Raiders was a killer, their MO is gone now.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Week 15

Last Week:2-7-1Overall:49-62-1

The last three weeks have been very brutal to O'Hoolix, sinking the furry alien to more than 10 games below .500. It seems as though O'Hoolix's super-computer is missing a chip or two. Alas, there is always next week!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

NFL Week 14

Last Week:4-7Overall:47-55-6

O'Hoolix got brutalized by the hook in the Bears/Lions game, both on the side and total. Another tough week for the furry space alien that loves earthly sports wagering. Well, O'Hoolix is picking himself up off of the floor of his space cruiser and is ready to deliver winners this week.

Asleep At the Wheel Again

Maybe it is true that ESPN has a bunch of monkeys actually doing the writing for their website!

I understand that people are going to make mistakes in writing articles that will not get caught before they are posted. I still do not understand who so MANY get through, but we are not really sure how many different eyes actually review a writer's work anymore. (Any?)

What I cannot understand is how you can fuck up a HEADLINE and nobody catch it before it is posted to your website! Yet ESPN has done it on many, many occasions. Obviously they are corrected in short order, but still, there is no excuse for a headline to be grossly incorrect.

Last night as I was heading to bed, I wanted to check the score of last nights Ravens-Falcons game, so I hit the ESPN Mobile sight on my phone and see this headline on the top of the page:

Matt Ryan Engineers 80-Yard Drive In Final Minute As Falcons Top Saints, 26-21 Nice headline right? Except the Falcons played the RAVENS you fucktards!!!!!! How do you mess up that bad and nobody catch it? Are there no protocols at midnight before things are posted on your website?!? Maybe the Lom Henn crew need to quit our jobs and work for ESPN as editors. Lord knows we couldn't be any worse!

You may be the world leader in sports entertainment, ESPN, but you are also the leader in fucking stupid mistakes (as well as the leader in reporting breaking stories with unnamed sources, but that is another story, altogether.)

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Hooray!!!

Of course, the first time we were told that Joe Morgan would no longer be part of ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball, it was 2008 and it was reported by the New York Daily News--not exactly accuracy at it's finest. But now the Worldwide Leader has announced it, so it must be official: Joe Morgan and Jon Miller are out!

This makes me happy. It's well-documented on LomHenn and on a few other websites (like this one) that Joe Morgan is not a particularly good baseball analyst, so it's about time ESPN caught up to what a lot of hardcore baseball fans have thought for awhile now. And I'm not a big fan of Miller, either, though he hasn't been as annoying to me over the last couple of years.

There is a downside--no more Joechats on ESPN.com! As a result, everyone's baseball IQ has gone up 20 points...even those people who don't care about baseball.