Monday, November 2, 2009

One year in

Dear Torsten,

One year and one day ago, you and I stood up before most of the people we love and who love us, and declared our love and commitment to one another. It was a pretty awesome day.

I can't recall the exact words that you spoke to me during the ceremony (though I know you still have them written down somewhere), but I don't think I'll ever forget how it felt to hear them spoken in that moment. Every detail of the day worked out the way we wanted--from the beautiful flowers to the delicious cake to the excellent DJ--and while I am still so happy that it all came together so well, the thing that made the day so great was that it was about us, and I got to spend it with you, both of us so happy to just be married. Standing up there with you saying our vows, sitting at our table together chatting during dinner, dancing with you for the rest of the night. No worries, no stress, no demands... just us. Married.

It has been an incredibly big year for us, and not just because of the whole marriage thing. As soon as we got back from our honeymoon we plunged into figuring out how to move to Denver, and in February it finally came together. We spent what I still consider to be our best Valentine's Day together driving across the country to our new home. A few weeks after that, we adopted Montana, and our little family expanded from two to three. A month after that, we bought a house, our first (and hopefully last). And then, a month after that, I had weight-loss surgery.

It was a whirlwind six months, let's put it that way. But everything that happened during that time was great, a happy, positive change. It was worth the whirlwind, is what I'm saying.

But you know what's been even greater than all those wonderful life changes? It's been the six months since then, the six months of us living in our house, with our dog, in Colorado, enjoying ourselves. It's been the life we've settled into and the calmer days we've been experiencing. It's been you, with me, us together, the foundation of our family as it is now and as it will be.

I love the way you are, on your own and with me. I love the way we are together. I love how well we know each other. I love how you watch your favorite sports team run away in a blowout win and still think they're going to find a way to lose. I love that I know you'll agree to come to the dog park with me only if I agree to stop for coffee on the way. I love that you cuddle me every night before we go to sleep, no matter what the day has been like, no matter how tired we are, no matter if we'd been squabbling earlier. I love that I can look at you and know what you're feeling, what you're thinking. I love that you can do the same with me.

This is our family now, one year in. I am so happy with where we are now. I can't wait to see where we go.