"A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes." Hugh Downs~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A woman pregnant with her first child paid a visit to her obstetrician's office.

After the exam, she shyly said, "My husband wants me to ask you...," to which the doctor replies, "I know, I know," placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I get asked that all the time. Sex is fine until late in the pregnancy."

"No, that's not it," the woman confessed. "He wants to know if I can still mow the lawn."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"

"What dear?" She asked gently.

"I think you bring me bad luck."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Standing at the edge of the lake, a man saw a woman flailing about in the deep water. Unable to swim, the man screamed for help. A trout fisherman ran up.

The man said, "My wife is drowning and I can't swim. Please save her. I'll give you a hundred dollars." The fisherman dove into the water. In ten powerful strokes, he reached the woman, put his arm around her, and swam back to shore.

Depositing her at the feet of the man, the fisherman said, "Okay, where's my hundred dollars?"

The man said, "Look, when I saw her going down for the third time, I thought it was my wife. But this is my mother-in-law."

The fisherman reached into his pocket and said, "Just my luck. How much do I owe you?"~~~~~~~~~~~~

A female officer arrests a drunk. She warns him, "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you."

The drunk replies, "Boobs."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everyboomie.

Remember that surprise I had for you? Here it comes......

IT'S THE "T" WORD!!!!!

Happy Tuesday everybody!

Any more excitement and I'll be in the chiropractors office all day.

Not really but I need some muscle relaxers, or a pound of bananas to fight off the monster leg cramps that had me rolling off the couch, and hobbling around like a Night of the Living Dead zombie.

Did I mention to y'all how much distaste I have for Summer?

Yeah I thought I had.

I walked the creek in the heat all afternoon yesterday and the cramps followed me home.

It was a "point-less" effort.

Well I'm out of smileys, which is like being out of punctuation to me, so I may as well close with my usual.

Have a happy day everyone.

joe

Edited by gymcandy1 (06/03/1310:58 PM)

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"Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in." Will Rogers

Good Morning Joe, Ana, manxman and Haroula. Joe as Ana said not drinking enough water when it's hot can cause dehydration and that can cause leg cramps. Ana enjoy your day. Manxman have fun with your new game. Haroula keep smiling. And Cailyn I put the coffee on. Happy Day wished for All!

Good morning everyone. Midge, big Hugs on the way. We get the results of hubby's scan this afternoon. Thanks to all for your prayers and positive thoughts. To all here and all who follow, have a Wonderful Tuesday. Danish, BB Pancakes, and Fruit Cups in the NC.

Good morning. I'm being lazy this morning. Thanks for opening for us Joe. Sorry about your leg cramps. I hope today is better for you. Morning Ana, manxman, Haroula, Gerry, Connie, Gail, and all who follow me in. Connie sending prayers that the scan results are good news.

Hubby and I popped up bright and early and headed out to imitate hamsters for a bit. We were successful, though we did scare a couple of ladies near to death. They are very friendly and walk at the same time we do and you can tell they were afraid of the dogs. Hubby stopped to talk to them to try to make them more comfortable with the dogs. Worked for a sec and then Sky saw something that set him off barking. Thought they were going to faint....poor things.

I am trying out smoothie recipes. Most of them have been good. Tried a cabbage peach one this morning. Thought it tasted like moldy cardboard However, I had modified the recipe (which I often do) so thought that might be the problem. Dumped it down the sink and made it again following the recipe to a t. Nope, still tasted like moldy cardboard. Added an apple and some tart cherry juice. That helped so I could drink it, but will not be putting this one in regular smoothie rotation.

Joe, I used to have leg cramps that would strike out of nowhere and leave me in tears. Doc told me to take calcium. I thought he was nuts cos I drank lots of milk, at e cheese, ice cream etc. However, these were so painful I figured it couldn't hurt. Well, took calcium daily and no more cramps. Woo hoo! Hope you find a solution for yours soon.

Connie, prayers going up. We will all be thinking of you.

Midgy, you are never lazy...it's recuperation time. Enjoy!

Back later

Edited by looney4labs (06/04/1310:42 AM)

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"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole." -Roger Caras

L4L, milk and dairy products actually leeches calcium from your bones. You are better off drinking almond milk or some alternative non animal milk. I hope you find a healthy smoothie recipe that you enjoy. I can't imagine starting my day without one.

Ana, must be so as the added calcium did the trick for me. Now I'm trying to figure out why I'm vit D deficient when I get an hour sun a day (walking dogs), take vit D every day, and eat spinach several times a week. I don't eat fish very often as I really don't like the taste and can't take fish oil as everything tastes like fish all day if I do. But still.....We shall see what happens with the addition of the prescription D.

We are finding that we like most of the smoothie recipies we've tried, which is why it was surprising not to like this one. I really missed my smoothies while we were in Ohio visiting.

_________________________
"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole." -Roger Caras

Joe hope the legs get feeling better. HUGS! Enjoy your day off and good luck hunting, if ya go!! Thanks for the laughs.

Hope the net stays working. I been computer cleaning and they sent me a new modem so I been getting that all set up and then went and got my fishing license in hopes of warmer weather and fishing.

Ana I pray that the corner is moving right along for you and that the weekend plans are falling into place! Have a nice run with the dogs.

Manxman have a lovely day and have fun gaming!!

Haroula have a lovely day!

Cailyn hope you are having fun shopping.

Gerry thanks for the coffee. Have a lovely day!

Connie HUGS and Prayers!!! Thanks for the treats! May all news be good news!

Gail I don't use one of those much but I can't say I ever saw Sassy run from it. Have a lovely day and hope you are feeling well.

Midge HUGS!! Happy cleaning!!

Darlene may work fly and all go smoothly! Have a lovely day!

L4l cardboard????? Yuck!!!! I can say I have ever had a smoothie but I just might have to check it out.

If memory serves me.....the absobtion of Calcium and Vit D, at least in women, require your estrogen levels to be at a certain level cause they help in the absorbtion. Chewing a couple tums three times a day gives one plenty of Calcium. Too much salt in a diet can drain the Calcium too! Some leg cramps have to do with low levels of Potassium also.