Hello folksies. Ahkmed just to say so longsies. I am a character invented by Philip Douglas in 1998. The year a man named Usama Bin Laden, who's brother Salim loaned GW Bush 5 million buckaroos and then died in a freak plane crash near Houston...

Memories on the CNN. Recalling disguising myself as an illegal Mexican and walking into the USA with several cans of refried anthrax. And easily poisoning your unguarded water supplies.
He he. I even hijacked a water truck in L.A. And filled it with Agent Orange. And dumped it into the L.A. aqueduct and wiped out 10 million of you fat lazy basstards.

Unless you're talking about the time I naively thought Akhmed was a real person, a different person entirely; I had only been commenting on TJI for a month or so at that time, and had never run across characters before. 2010.

Howdy folks. A sheriff Bob here just ta say good bye to you folks. I'm a character someone else on old news blogs that Philip Douglas hijacked and brought to CNN a few years ago.
I hail from Dog City Kansas. Where two houseflies crashed into our bank buildings and they all fell down.
Just wanted to say goodbye is all.
Be careful.

Now Mr. Kitty was entirely the invention of Philip.Eugene Douglas Colorado Springs SS#524-06-1460 tele 719.482.0341. Come and get me you cheap muther fockers.
I was but one of the characters Philip made up right after 9/11 trying to show you idiots what was really going on. 17 of you listened out of the thousands I approached.
Of course Mr. Kitty is based on the lovely Miss Kitty of GUNSMOKE fame. The original "Matt Dillon" was a teacher of mine. Bible teacher, that is.
So long folks.

Now acourse Philip didn't make up my character. But he used it tryin' to show you folks you got about as much chance now as a grasshopper does in a henhouse. But ya'll are just too dern ignorant to listen.
Philip so admires the character of Festus he refused to alter it's name in his little post-9/11 skit.

I printed up flyers labeled "The Truth about 9/11" and I closed my business down right after 9/11. And I went downtown and approached my neighbors on the streets and handed them my little flyers which told the truth. And I was spat on and man handled. And arrested for no reason and thrown into jail for no cause.
Fock you suns a biatches! I did my part dear God I did my part.

I suppose you folks already know where Doc Adams, aka old doctors before NAZI meds were made available to you pill chasers, stands on 9/11. Ain't no way in tarnation two houseflies brought down those bank buildings. Are you folks overly medicated or what.

I printed up flyers labeled "The Truth about 9/11" and I closed my business down right after 9/11. And I went downtown and approached my neighbors on the streets and handed them my little flyers which told the truth. And I was spat on and man handled. And arrested for no reason and thrown into jail for no cause.
Fock you suns a biatches! I did my part dear God I did my part.
Kiss my ass you ignorant focks. Am done with you all.

When PGA legend Payne Stewart's jet crashed, fighter jets were there within minutes. But when jets crashed into your Trade Towers, there was a delay. And you did not raise one single eyebrow you ignorant mother fockers.

A person not doing so isn't a sign of cowardice, it a sign of a reasonable person who is aware of the dangers of the here and now of doing so, not of events that happened 20, 50, 100, or 200 years ago.

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