London 2012 v Twenty Twelve: fact or fiction?

As the Olympics approach, reality and fiction blur with increasing regularity for the viewers of BBC2's Twenty Twelve, John Morton's scarily accurate comedy set in the offices of the London 2012 deliverance committee. So which of these events actually happened?

London Olympics officials bus a delegation of Brazilians to the Olympic Park but the driver hasn’t heard of Stratford and they end up halfway to the Cotswolds. A red-faced official is dispatched to call Lord Coe from a layby with some story about a flat tyre.

A bus carrying athletes from Heathrow airport to the Olympic village gets so wretchedly lost it drives round and round central London – “Look kids, Big Ben!” – finally delivering the jet-lagged sportspeople four hours later.

The ticket nightmare

Disappointing ticket sales for Olympic football matches lead officials to shut large chunks of the stadiums in Cardiff and Glasgow, thus creating the impression of a full house. Like Katie Holmes crouching in all of those pictures with Tom Cruise.

In an attempt to overhaul the image of women’s football, top -female players are encouraged to stop mentioning it in their tweets as it’s putting people off.

Help for Londoners

Get Ahead of the Games.

Way To Go!

Security headache

When US security experts arrive to inspect the stadium, bother with a sabotaged starting pistol results in an accidental shooting.

Security contractors fail to -employ enough security guards, leaving 3,500 British soldiers to make up the shortfall.

The culture clash

Several countries express their distaste at Saudi Arabia’s initial intention to field an all-male -Olympic team.

Algeria threatens to pull out unless the multi-faith worship centre is rebuilt to face Mecca. (It never ends well when you try to please all of the people.)