The Real Story: My rise & fall through it all: my struggles with finding happiness and love while fumbling through depression. Finding success, wealth, and notoriety while encountering equal, if not greater, failures and errors in judgement. Then finding myself somehow discovering and recapturing love and other things I had lost along the way. And in all of this, I have now realized what I sacrificed and those I hurt by paying the ultimate price; the Dao of Chris.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Hunger is the most important thing we know...the first lesson we learn.
But hunger is easily satiated. There is another force; a different kind
of hunger. An unquenchable thirst that cannot be extinguished. Its very
existence defines us...makes us human. That force? Love.

That love, is the one force that cannot be explained nor broken down
into a chemical process. It is the beacon that guides us back home when
no one is there and the light that illuminates our loss. Its absence
robs us of all pleasure and our capacity for joy. It makes our nights
darker and days gloomier. But where we find love, no matter how wrong,
how sad, or how terrible, we cling to it. It feeds on us...and we feed
on it. Love is our grace. Love is our downfall.

Thursday, July 3, 2014

This is a cynical business. It seeks only imperfection. Actions create consequences, which produce new worlds...and they are all different. When we choose to continue down a path, that is a certain world. When we choose to take the path less traveled, that is another. All these worlds heretofore are known to us. They have always been there. I would urge you to see the truth of the situation we are in. It is not for me to tell you what you should have done or should not have done. The world in which we seek to undo the mistakes we have made is different from the world where the mistakes were made. We are now at the crossing and we want to choose... but there is no choosing. There is only accepting. The choosing was done a long time ago.

I am a deeply reflective person. Unfortunately, I have come to realize that reflective people often find themselves in a place removed from the realities of life. We should all prepare a place where we can accommodate all the tragedies that sooner or later will come to our lives. However, this is an economy in which few people care to practice. Do not continue to deny the reality that you are in.

Life is not going to take you backwards. You are the world you have created... and when you cease to exist, this world you have created will also cease to exist. But for those with the understanding that they are living the last days of the world, death acquires a different meaning. The extinction of all reality is a concept no resignation can encompass.