You know I reblogged that Playboy article about Black Widow and as I lay here unable to sleep I thought here is the perfect example of why text is not all or nothing. Playboy is not a feminist publication. I suppose we can fight over it but I’m feeling pretty good about that statement. Playboy has, however, been a major player in Civil Rights activism and allowed a space for some excellent journalism. It also celebrates the objectification of women. So here is a text that both disrupts and upholds the patriarchy simultaneously. Not something all that unusual.

And I’ve seen a lot of love for The Kingsmen on my dash lately. That’s fine. I obviously support people loving what they like, but The Kingsmen was a massively problematic text. It was flashy sure. Enjoyable in places absolutely. But weirdly misogynistic at the end? Strangely classist? Almost stubbornly unaware of what it wanted to say? Also all of those things.

And I guess what I’m saying here (and keep in mind I have indigestion-induced insomnia) is that every time I see Tumblr or the internet or the world go apeshit over how “awful” something is I want to run a slideshow of stuff like this. There are easy things we can all agree on (blurred lines) but texts that obvious are few and far between. Most especially because songs exist in a much different space and way than books, movies, tv shows, video games, or comic books. So why is it we sometimes turn a blind eye and sometimes pass judgment–judge, jury, and executioner–from a trailer alone?

There are few things more dangerous than righteousness and I so strongly believe when I am so very sure I am right is when I have to be most critical of what I think. Passion doesn’t negate an argument but ideologies are not simple things. Critiquing society is not a simple thing. It’s complicated and dangerous and the moment you think you’ve figured it out is the moment you become what you hate. It’s easy to tell someone why they’re wrong. It’s much more difficult to understand what they mean and why or how they came to mean it.

It’s just curious to me, is all. The way we aren’t up in arms about the porn industry. Or Grand Theft Auto. Or so many other things. Instead, like some vicious flash mob we love and hate in an instant, so thrilled with our insight we never stopped to ask where it came from. And I think what really bothers me about it is that we love or hate *people.* Not texts. Not stories. Not characters (though to be fair we hate those too) but PEOPLE. Real people we don’t know and real people we intentionally refuse to understand. What is that but the very worst the internet has to make of us?

Anyway, even this mob power we’ve amassed is great most of the time. It’s spurred education and civil rights and social justice and critiques of capitalist globalization. It’s great. Until it’s not.

(Current) Aries: You make me feel so special, and you have a habit of making me lose sleep. Our conversations are full on inside jokes, sarcasm, pickup lines, and compliments that make your cheeks turn rosy red. I’m terrified of losing you. Please don’t forget me.

Taurus: I thought I was your third choice, what makes you think you can suddenly start liking me once I stopped liking you? You think this is a game, guess it doesn’t matter because I already won.

Gemini: You loved me first, and I watched you fall for another after another. Each time breaking their poor hearts. You never knew what you really wanted, and I’m glad I never gave you the chance to leave me heart broken.

Cancer: I remember the day you wanted to kiss me, you asked politely, but I refused because we had just met. You seemed to only like my body, not me. You tossed me away when I wouldn’t give you what I wanted.

Leo: Our love was toxic from the start, but darling we wrote poetry.
We both knew how things were going to end. Just like a fire we ended in ashes. Did all the time we shared go to waste?

Virgo: Thinking about you makes me want to forget. The memories seemed so harmless, but they keep me up late at night wondering why I didn’t take the risks. I was so conflicted. I made mistakes.

Libra: Your eyes pierced me, and instantly there was a connection. Flirting with you was such an ease, but I was so conflicted. You were so endearing, and you actually wanted to get to know me for me.

Scorpio: You. I miss you from time to time. I wonder if you remember our late conversations, I’m sorry I had to leave. You called me once, and told me about how happy you were. Maybe I was jealous?

Sagittarius: I always smiled around you, and you always returned the smile. There was so much sarcastic jokes between us, we could have written a book. But you knew better then to fall in love with me.

Capricorn: You confused me. You said you didn’t like me but your actions and words told me other wise. Maybe you liked to play games, but don’t ever do that to my heart.

Aquarius: Oh you were such a witty one, but did you get scared of your own feelings? What ever happened to your sarcastic one liners, and the quick glances towards me?

Pisces: You never really liked me, did you? Maybe at a time you did, but in the end you only liked the idea of me. So you used me to get them jealous. But jokes on you, I did the same.

little soldier boy
so far away from home
won’t you come into your own?
oh, what does your heart beat for?

little lion man
blue blood running through your veins
hearts of gold are not just pure,
they’re also heavy.
oh, what does your skin bleed for?

little prince with no crown
heir of no throne, you wear armour as your gown.
don’t you want to go home? don’t you want your throne?
this is your kingdom come
but now it’s all gone wrong
oh, i know what you die for.

its so weird cause like when lucaya has a moment i get like really excited and my heart starts jumping but whenever theres a rucas moment my heart just kinda drops and i wanna throw out the tv....i guess the heart wants what it wants.

It is seriously cold today so I don’t know why this is what I felt like when I got back from walking my dogs in the rain and the wind this morning but whatever, the heart wants what the heart wants I guess 🌸 frozen bananas, @h2coco coconut water, coconut milk, vanilla + cacao powder, topped with coconut, @benaturalausnz granola and farmers market strawberries and edible blooms 🌸💫 #vegan

I had a little mishap earlier, a miscalculation really. See, when I went to make copies, I forgot to actually count up the number of people in the two sections to figure out how many I needed, so I guessed because I was in a hurry. I ended up being five copies down from what I needed as I was passing them out. I told my class to behave and make sure nobody got hurt while I was gone and hurried to the copier and back (this meant I was out of the classroom for less than 5 minutes).

After school, I had a bunch of my freshman volleyball players hanging out in my classroom since they didn’t have time to go home before our game.

Player: You know you’re my favorite teacher, right?

Me (figuring I’m being built up to be asked for something): Yeah, okay.

Player: No, really. All of our other teachers go on and on about how we need to make sure we don’t embarrass them by being bad if they have to leave the room for something. You didn’t say anything about embarrassing you, it was all about making sure that we were being safe while you were gone. Like, you really care about whether or not we get hurt.

i’ve never wanted someone to buy me stuff or do big outlandish gestures

the introvert in me and how i was raised never let me really enjoy things like that

but what really makes my heart melt is knowing i can count on this person. that i never have to guess if they love me because they tell me. that i know they have my best interests in heart. that they care about me in a way that i can depend on.

and what really makes me smile is knowing i’m appreciated. that both my presence and my absence mean something to that person. that the little things i do matter to them. that they show me they appreciate me and who i am by knowing me, really getting to know me, with no judgment.

i did love when he sent me flowers and a build a bear for my birthday. and i did love when he bought me the necklace he gave me when he asked me to be his girlfriend.

but what really really lets me know that this means something is how fiercely and consistently he loves and appreciates me