Trashy fash crash

We love a bit of knob-twiddling at the Triv Media Control Console here beneath the dusty rafters of Palazzo Trivialista. Especially when los knobs twiddle our attentions toward the best of the best, Mail Online’s showbiz section.

If this is what divorce has done to HK’s fash sense, bring back Seal…

Anyone know Heidi? If so, maybe you’ve been in touch to ask her what the bejeezers is going on with this outfit? Her fash sense has always bordered slightly on the cashed-up bogan, but this is just one turquoise bedazzled lace-up catasptophe too far.

And here she is at the after-soirée, for better or wurst…

Mail Online captioned this pic — which was Heidi’s own, posted on Twitter — thus: “After the ceremony Heidi was delighted she finally got the chance to eat some sausages.”

Srsly, La laughed so hard gaskets threatened to burst.

Our old friend Matthew McConauchinachaghey has obviously heard about the Oscar-attracting powers of physical transformation; here he is in character for his upcoming role as an HIV sufferer.

Sheesh! Where does he get the willpower? And can he pls bottle some and flog it on Net-a-Porter?

La’s loathe to be unkind to Katie; after all she had the good, gutsy sense to leave that buffoon she was hypnotised by married to, and she’s now a single mom doing her best in La Big Apple, albeit backed by some hefty maintenance payments for her loin fruit. But Katie, in addition to continuing to carve out a seemingly successful Broadway career, wants us to buy her Holmes & Yang frocks. Yet look at how she dresses most of la time! Ploise! Think this is proof that Bi-Polar Fash Mash Disorder, à la Seed and Country Road, can apply to people too.

So — Mail Online. Do yourself a favour.

Funking the whole Triv Spectacular up is an ongoing project, a destination that will never be reached, a perpetual quest for excellence. To that unreachable end, here are the sunnies Seriousimo is not yet aware he’s bought me for Christmas. They’re on their way to the Wide Brown land with a Rag & Bone top — as everyone knows, Rag & Bone = immediate injection of cool youthfulness / cool youthfulness. Now that La’s over the age of 40 35, this is tremendously helpful.

But what to buy Seriousimo? Egads La hates buying for men (apart from La Pappa Trivialista, as he’s a clotheshorse, ergo a cinch to shop for). Seriousimo is particularly difficult because he’s, well, serious. Our letterbox has almost collapsed under the weight of past giftings of worthy subscription tomes. You know the sort — Atlantics, NY Review of Bookses, London Review of Bookses, Economistas. La’s all subbed out. And now when he gets a break from los legal briefs, he’s most likely to be found blinking at his Kindle, known beneath los dusty rafters as the Kris Krindle, it having been a Yuletide gift and all.