The Pharisee stood and was praying to himself:
“God, I thank you that I am not like other people:
Emergents,
Democrats,
Anyone who isn’t just like me…
Or even like this Tax Collector.
I don’t fast.
And I don’t tithe.
But at least I don’t have tattoos or care about social justice.”

Then the Tax Collector,
standing quite some distance away,
prayed to himself:
“God, I thank you that I am not like other people:
Evangelicals,
Conservatives,
Anyone who isn’t just like me…
Or even like this Pharisee.
I don’t fast.
And I don’t tithe.
But at least I don’t drive an SUV or believe the Bible is actually true.”

And no one’s prayer was heard.
And the light was covered.
And the salt lost its saltiness.