Dr. Em and Princess WeeWee are sisters raised by a pair of free spirited hippies. One sister rebelled to become a world renowned psychiatrist; specializing in phobias. The other sister embraced the possibility of ideals and became an award winning artist. Both sisters hold a very low tolerance for idiocy and work in their own way to address and combat the common sense challenged. These pages chronicle their adventures and observations.

Saturday, April 07, 2012

An Old and Wise Squatter Cat

Last night I was out on the back porch enjoying my favorite wine and refinishing an old cedar chest. The weather was excellent, I had almost rid the chest of 100 years worth of stains and paint (only a few more strippings to go) and I was feeling great. Suddenly there was a slight movement near the porch door coupled with a barely audible rustling; I swiveled my head around to catch whatever was trying to sneak by me. But there was nothing there. I continued to stare suspiciously for another few seconds and finally decided it must have just been the wind. I slowly turned back to the chest, keeping my eyes on the door as long as possible. When my gaze finally returned to the task at hand I nearly jumped out of my skin.

There sitting atop the chest staring calmly and intently at me was a grey and charcoal striped cat with the greenest eyes you've ever seen. When my heart finally returned to a normal pace, I met the cat's unyielding stare and said in a steady and stern voice "you may be new but you are violating the terms of the contract." Then something impossible happened...the cat spoke back!

Cat: Ah yes, Princess WeeWee, I have been made aware that such an agreement exists.

Me: [confused stare]

Cat: Do not doubt yourself, Princess WeeWee. For I am here and I am real.

Me: But...What...Who...I don't understand.

Cat: All will become clear when the time is right, Princess WeeWee.

Me: Are you with the Squatter Cats? Do Jetblack, Snowhite and Tigerstripes know you're here?

Cat: With? No, I would not characterize it as such. They know of my presence and approve of the message I bring but we are not kin and it is likely that after this night I shall not be graced with their companionship again.

Me: Wait, huh? I think I lost you somewhere...I'm confused. Message? What are you?

Cat: I am as you see me.

Me: What does that mean? What do you want? Why are you here? I still don't get who-what you are.

Cat: Know this Princess WeeWee, I am here only to aid you in the continuance of your rightful path.

Cat: Princess WeeWee, there is no need for hostility. I am not here to threaten you. I am here to give you this-

Me: What? You're a cat, you don't have anything! Unless you're some sort of cat, kangaroo hybrid I can clearly see you have nothing.

Cat: Is that so, Princess WeeWee? Do all gifts need to be seen? Held? Touched? No. My gift to you is this...

Me: What?! Just get it over with!

Cat: The second cushion.

And then the cat was gone! I blinked and all that was left to prove his presence was a smudged paw print on the chest. Confused, rattled and a bit scared I decided to lay down on the porch couch for a bit and try to comprehend what had just happened.

The encounter must have taken more out of me than I realized because the next thing I remember is waking up on the couch, next to the still unfinished chest, covered in cracker crumbs and tuna fish. But I remembered my visit...I knew that cat had not come here just to tease me. But what could second cushion mean? I mulled this over as I cleaned up the mysterious food particles, made and ate breakfast and settled back down in the porch to work on the chest. Then it hit me!

Cushion! I'm sitting on a couch with cushions! There are three cushions on my porch couch so the middle one had to be the second. I was anxious and even a little scared as I slowly lifted up the fated second cushion. And there it was, like a dream or a mirage. I couldn't believe my eyes, how did the cat know? Who was he? I cautiously reached down, afraid it was an illusion, a crazy flight of fancy. But as my hands wrapped around the long lost but not forgotten treasure. I knew I had met a truly mystical being last night.

I held it up, turned over and over in my hands, convincing myself I really had it and it was really real. After fruitless searches and agonizing nights spent wondering, I finally had it...