please advise

And just as I thought, “Wow. It’s been weeks since I’ve bloggedaboutAli’srandomness. Could things be looking up?” my phone chimed with a text. From my husband.

Now before I dissect this text, let me just acknowledge that I received it close to 5:00 pm. Yes, this means that not only did Ali remember to pick Maya up from after school care, but he picked her up 30 minutes early!

So a part of me is grateful. Grateful that my husband heeded my desperate pleas for help with our child. Grateful that I had a few extra hours at work to catch up. Grateful that for once it was Ali who had to juggle his laptop and Maya’s filthy, germ-ridden backpack.

The grateful side of me told me not to address the text. To just let it go. But the bitchy side of me insisted that time is at a minimum these days and good blog fodder is hard to come by.

So here we go.

“Please advise?” I know it’s a bit late but yes, please allow me to advise:

I made pappardelle at 6:15 in the morning to ensure that Maya would eat properly.

What the message really says is this: “I know you already told me all this, but I’m gonna ask again, just to be sure. I did what you said and told her to eat the pasta you made but it’s not working!!! She’s still asking!!! We are lost without your infinite wisdom and guidance!”

Well, at least he asked first, even though he apparently couldn’t remember from earlier in the day. My experience is that all men have the same problem. No memory whatsoever. They must be thinking about sports or sex or something when we talk to them…thus they are only pretending to listen but their thoughts are clearly elsewhere. Such a shame, really.

I am sad to think this is not just limited to the earlier years. I plan out food for the little man only to find that half the time, people just feed him what they want. So I guess there’s a plus to being asked to advise? 🙂

1. Ice? …interesting. 😛
2. The “please advise” part was priceless. At least he asked your thoughts?
3. I’m not sure I know exactly what pappardelle is, so clearly Maya should feel fantastic getting to eat such a thing that to me sounds gourmet.
4. Is this the first time he has picked her up?

Because he’s a dad. Dads are supposed to give in. Mine did. All the time. Hubby does just about as much. It’s their job, especially on the little stuff like that. (I’m giving him the benefit of the doubt.)

I know what you mean. Men can’t do anything on their own. I send texts laying out the plan for the day and then I will still get a text asking me what to do as if I never send the plan to begin with. Also they are weak when it comes to their little girls and easily give in to their demands or better yet, say ” mommy told me you can’t have or do this”. And we then are the bad cops. Lmao. Good luck. Its never gonna change. Speaking from experience. Xoxoxo

haha. at least you got a text to ‘advise’. i come home to a toddler full of doritos and chocolate ice cream even if dinner is completely ready and on the stove!! what is it with men…they can’t say no!?!!? if i ask my husband why he allowed her to eat doritos, his answer is ‘because she said she wanted them!”

listen- “please advise” cracks me up. sounds like he is asking a boss ;)( or work colleague ) for information. Ismail will send emails to me with stuff he thinks I would find interesting starting with “FYI” and I get so mad. I feel the appropriate way to address it to me should be” My darling beautiful wife. Since the sole purpose of my existence is to make you smile, I came across this article /photo and thought you may enjoy it.Therefore I am passing it along. Hope it made you smile! Love always, Ismail” I have asked him to do this, and he actually looked perturbed. BAH Please Advise….

Yeah, this is pretty funny for sure. “Ali, no is no, just keep telling yourself that and one day you will be the boss.” hahahahahahaha! Your husband cracks me up. But, some similar things are happening in our home. The other day not just one but a few of my kids came to me and said, “we are tired of asking dad questions and having him tell us to come to you.” I went straight to the subject, (husband) and said, “what’s this all about.” He said, “well, you’re with them all day long and sometimes I feel like I just don’t have the answers.” Hmmmmm. “Answers to what,” I say. He says, “well like, whether or not they can have a snack after dinner.” I then said, “if you don’t think they should then they shouldn’t, if you think they should, then let them.” 🙂 Sometimes men can be…funny? 🙂 He’s the best, he just wants to do the right thing… by me…I’m guessing Ali too. 🙂

Methinks like this reeks of bein a pass the buck situation. By getting you to text that Maya can’t have the cheesecake pasta, he then has physical evidence to show Maya that it was mom, not dad, denying her what she wanted…

Hahaha “Please advise”, Ali is too funny (and nice) for his own good. And interesting about the ICE – although I’m pretty sure in an Arab country they would just look through for Mama/Baba/last dialed numbers!

My husband gives in all the time.
And he always asks for direction…which is genius…because he’ll tell my son…well mommy said no…so now I look like the bad guy.
Men are a lot smarter than we think they are.

I will give Ali 1 point for asking – instead of just giving in to Maya… but as for the clear instructions that I know were given (and obviously not remembered) at the beginning of the day… I have nothing to add. Honestly, I am continually baffled by the amount of knowledge men can keep in their heads (for mine – history, dates, the names of every king of any country…ever…) and yet he forgets what I told him yesterday. Why. WHHHHYYYY!!!!???