Thursday, 7 April 2011

Slightly depressed

Urgh, all my hard work ruined!! One stupid week at home with everyone and I am back where I started. I need to have more self control. I need to stop eating. I need to exercise more. I need to puke more. I need to revise. I need to do my assignments. I need to get a job. I need money. Why is my life so fucking depressing right now. Oh yea I know, because I can't control my own will. I am weak. I must be stronger! Yes that picture really is me!

On a brighter note, I bought the book, 'wasted' by Marya Hornbacher. Hoepfully it will keep me busy and inspire me to stop being a pig. I'm back alone for a day then I am away to spain for a week. Doubt I'll eat much there because I don't really like the foods there. Alcohol will be the killer. I don't even want to go, I want to stay here and starve and be alone, but I don't want to leave one of the girls alone because we only went because the other one was going. We are going with a team and most of them are your usual orange blobs with big hair and loud voices Intriguing. Anyway much loves as always. xx