Well, I botched that one...

I was having a debate on another website with someone who just told me she was following Weight Watchers to lose a lot of weight and was complaining that it wasn't working.

Ah, so enter my comment about the "primal" lifestyle. She was intrigued at first. Was getting the high fat, low carb deal, understanding the connection of insulin to fat storage, following me on my reason about lots of slow movement and lifting heavily on ocassion, she was digging the "whole and real foods" concept, everything was going well. She even wondered about cutting grains and why it was such a useful thing. I was making good ground. But she wanted hard evidence. So I lead her to Mark's recent blog about why cutting grains is not only, not bad, but probably even a good thing for us.

Then came the response, "This is bullshit, I'm blocking you."

So, I almost had a new primal convert. ALMOST!

How could I have approached this maybe in a less preachy manner that could have ended in her making the positive switch? Or am I crazy for even thinking that was possible, and that she was going to react that way right from the start. I mean... She was interested in everything I was saying at first but then, bam! Dramatic 180 switch. What did I do wrong?

Is there a way to explain the nutritional reasons for cutting grains from the diet without eliciting a visceral, gut-reaction that essentially shuts out any evidence to the contrary of the current CW wisdom on them?

Some people aren't capable of thinking outside the box. Such an intense response is usually fear based. I mean I reacted pretty strongly when I learned of the damage I had been doing to my body for years with "healthy grains". My reaction was to educate myself and my resulting decision was to change. Her reaction is based on her insecurities and narrow mindedness, not your approach. If people are closed off to real changes there is no good way to suggest it to them.

That seems to be the turn-off point for most of the folks I've discussed it with, they can't imagine life without "healthy, wholesome grains". You tried, it's her loss if she wants to snap her mind shut.

That seems to be the turn-off point for most of the folks I've discussed it with, they can't imagine life without "healthy, wholesome grains". You tried, it's her loss if she wants to snap her mind shut.

That's what I am thinking, although I want to think that there might have been a glimmer of hope in there!

Some people aren't capable of thinking outside the box. Such an intense response is usually fear based. I mean I reacted pretty strongly when I learned of the damage I had been doing to my body for years with "healthy grains". My reaction was to educate myself and my resulting decision was to change. Her reaction is based on her insecurities and narrow mindedness, not your approach. If people are closed off to real changes there is no good way to suggest it to them.

It's funny how she was TOTALLY following the low carb thing, even agreeing with it, but then the grains. The grains!

How are you going to go low carb as you say you think is good, if you're still wolfing down the grains?

It's funny how she was TOTALLY following the low carb thing, even agreeing with it, but then the grains. The grains!

How are you going to go low carb as you say you think is good, if you're still wolfing down the grains?

I think people find it hard to have things that they have learned to be the truth since childhood challenged. Myself included! Even if it makes sense it's still hard to swallow. I have not always been so open minded, not just about primal, but many things. What can I say... I'm a late bloomer. But until people decide to be open to something you can talk till ya pass out, but they won't even process it.

To be fair, there are a lot of people out there spewing bullshit, and when you're steeped in CW, it's easy to block out what certain people say. But no worries, she may hear this again from someone else at some point, and maybe next time she'll think it's not such bullshit. And maybe someday she'll be open to it, and you'll be the person who planted that seed.

I tend to start them out with just little deviations from CW. I talk about einkorn wheat vs dwarf or I suggest whole foods instead of processed by mentioning the sodium content. Start them out with just baby steps and lead them toward primal one crumb at a time...if that makes sense. I had a co-worker mention to me that her weight loss efforts were not fruitful...she ate lots frozen dinners. I suggested she stop eating frozen dinners b/c the sodium was probably causing her to retain water (sodium is so demonized by CW that it was an easy sell) and get her "healthy grains" from rice and quinoa for a week and see how she felt. Guess what...she lost weight. Now she is more open to the idea that grains in general are bad for you and that whole foods are the way to go...but if I had hit her with everything all at once, I'd have lost her.

So I guess my advice is start off slow with one small thing. And if they dont bite...I would just quit trying to steer them the right way...they arent ready.

It's just another day in paradise
As you stumble to your bed
You'd give anything to silence
Those voices ringing in your head
You thought you could find happiness
Just over that green hill
You thought you would be satisfied
But you never will-
Learn to be still
-The Eagles

To be fair, there are a lot of people out there spewing bullshit, and when you're steeped in CW, it's easy to block out what certain people say. But no worries, she may hear this again from someone else at some point, and maybe next time she'll think it's not such bullshit. And maybe someday she'll be open to it, and you'll be the person who planted that seed.

What an excellent way to look at it! The person who planted the seed... As someone who never warms up to any thing, person, or idea that quickly I love this