Thursday, November 12, 2009

After writing this came the big debate… do I blog it? I almost didn’t. I guess I worry I may come off wrong, or that I sound silly. Then I realized I was letting fear get the best of me, and that just ticked me off, so consequently now I have to post it. Anyway only like 5 people read my blog anyway. And I still can’t quite put my finger on why I’m hesitant.

Oh well...

J came home from a fireside a couple weeks back. Edwin Mulitalo who has played for the NFL (the Ravens & the Lions and is now a free agent) addressed the youth. J shared with me the many inspiring thoughts that had been given that night. I was a tad jealous, but at least grateful I got the second hand account. One of the many thoughts Brother Mulitalo shared that captured my interest was his statement….

“I’m an ordinary person, whose had extraordinary experiences.”

I thought about that. I’ve since then changed it a bit to suit me.

And I came up with…

“I’m an ordinary gal, whose having an extraordinary life.”

I have not visited far off lands. I haven’t mingled with “important” people. I haven’t been famous, or even seen famous. My clothes mostly come from Target and occasionally Forever 21.

I made a decision shortly after my first child was born. I was feeling frumpy. I was overwhelmed by my new “job.” I felt that my “youth” was disappearing and I was entering a new faze of my mortal experience. I decided rather than feeling life was all but over (I laugh at that now) that I would embrace this new me. That I would make life, no matter when or how it changed, no matter what is handed me, or what circumstances arise… to make that life extraordinary. I’ve come to the conclusion that having an extraordinary life isn’t reserved for a select few. Rather it is a choice.

To clarify,

I feel that when you take what life has appointed you,

and do the BEST you can with it….

that life becomes extraordinary.

I’ve been given a gift.

I’m doing what I’ve wanted to do since the time I was a youngster. I get to be a mom. I know people have differing opinions about it, but for me I consider being home with my children a gift. It is something I want, and somehow right now I’ve been blessed with it. Being a SAHM isn’t easy. It takes a great deal of will power. I am my own boss. Every day I have to make a list for myself of what I want to have happen. Sometimes I fail. At times I’m overzealous so I don’t meet every expectation. Other days my toddler attempts to convince me that he’s the boss. One day last week he put my favorite earrings in the toilet. He then discovered how to move a chair to provide the height he required to grab his sisters Halloween candy from the counter. After dumping it all on the floor he sat amongst his prey and proceeded to put multiple suckers in his mouth. To top it off he did it all in the buff… cause who need’s clothes when your 18 months old? He's also in this marvelous stage where he wants to feed himself. So he has an average of 3 baths a day. One after each meal. So a better portion of my day becomes devoted to disaster clean up. Additionally, there are certain aspects of motherhood I’m not very good at. I’m not up at 6 a.m. preparing well-balanced breakfasts of eggs, pancakes, bacon and orange juice. Morning and I accept each other… but that doesn’t mean we have to like each other. Cold cereal and milk are all right by me.

On the rare occasion we have pancakes… it’s usually for dinner.

Anyway… my fault list could go on a mile, but I’m attempting to focus on the positive.

Despite all this there are those moments of satisfaction, when I feel a sense of accomplishment. When I just don’t give a little of me, but I give all of me. I host a mean dance party with my 5 and 7 year olds. I’m outstanding at bedtime stories. Holidays are full of traditions, excitement and usually a little glitter. Fashion shows are delivered on a regular basis to our one member audience

(J is a trooper). I give my kids art lessons, play games and cook with them. There is never a shortage of love and hugs and happy moments. I go to church, spend most of the time in the hall chasing “the boy” but I do it because that’s what you do, and that is what I want my girls to see me doing… going even when it's tough. I’m trying to learn new things. Like canning, gardening and sewing and how to change a diaper and talk on the phone at the same time. I’m trying to make our house a home, a comfortable and peaceful place for my children to grow. There is no shortage of creative ideas being attempted in our home. It can be in the way I discipline or when I’m painting and my daughters hover over me asking me questions about the process.

These are the moments and the accomplishments that make me think…

I’m not the best at this, but I’m the best I can be at it.

My goal is that in the twilight of life (God willing), I will look back with no regrets. I will be satisfied with how I spent my time and energy. I will feel confident that I gave my all, that I magnified my calling.

That I did the best I could with my extraordinary life,

and with these

EXTRAORDINARY GIFTS…

These beautiful photos were taken by the most talented photographer ever, Angie Monson.

PERMISSIONS

I'm honored to the tips of my toes when someone uses my photos on their blog or on pinterest. Feel free to do so, however please don't post a full tutorial. Remember to link back to this blog and give me credit. And if you wouldn't mind letting me know... I'd love to see it, because it would make my day!