Chicago's most over-the-top bloody mary garnishes

Pickles? Cocktail onions? Celery? Eh. While a great bloody mary certainly starts with a balanced, housemade mix, it's the over-the-top skewers that make the bloodys at certain bars and restaurants memorable. In their quests to assemble the most outlandish garnish, Chicago bartenders reach for oysters, hot dogs, even slices of pizza. And now that football season has made 11 a.m. drinking totally acceptable—not that I was judging you before—it's high time you cozied up to one of these extreme bloody marys. Bonus: You won't be hungry 'til halftime.

The Grid's focus on all things Chicago extends to its weekend brunch bloody mary, topped with a poppy seed-bun-and-all Vienna beef hot dog plus a pickle spear, sport pepper, cocktail onion and cherry tomato. Where's the mustard, relish and celery salt? Oh, they're in the housemade mix, along with a bit of sriracha for kick.

You may see bottles of The Smoke Daddy's bloody mary mix on grocery shelves, but chances are good that if you use it to make your version at home, you'll miss out on the pulled pork-wrapped brisket skewer that accompanies the restaurant version. The kitchen keeps the meaty garnishes in a crock pot so they hit your table warm and tender, along with two olives, a pickle, a rim of celery salt and miniature High Life beer back.

Close your fridge door and head straight to Homeslice, where the classic morning-after slice of cold pizza lounges across your bloody mary. This is no boring cheese slice, either; it's a piece of the pizzeria's Luau pie topped with Canadian bacon and pineapple. Pepperoncini peppers and two slices of pepperoni complete the garnish, while a miniature High Life bottle waits in the wings as your beer back.

Feeling indecisive? Order up the bloody mary at Paramount Room and you'll be greeted by a skewer of nearly every classic garnish under the sun: white cheddar, corned beef-wrapped Wisconsin sharp cheddar, hard salami, a cherry tomato and a pickle slice. And while this bloody doesn't come with a beer back, a float of one of the bar's rotating craft drafts—recently it's been Ale Syndicate's municipal IPA—chills on top to temper the mix's heat.

When you've had a long night, maybe all you want the next morning is comfort food in the form of mom's meatloaf—with a bloody mary under it. This Gold Coast spot, which specializes in all things indulgent, starts its bloody with an atomic horseradish-flecked housemade mix, then adds a Guinness stout float and tops the glass with a skewer of red and yellow peppers, jalapeno-stuffed olives and yep, meatloaf cubes.

This laid-back biker bar begins its bloodys with housemade mix—available in bottles at retailers around the city—then adds a bit of beer to the glass (currently, it's St. Ambrose oatmeal stout.). Bartenders dress up the drink with a skewer of salami, pepperoncini peppers, cocktail onions and, instead of another expected cheese cube, a mound of grated Parmesan cheese. Wash all that down with a lighter beer back; currently it's Genesee cream ale.

You might need to wait until you've finished your video game at this Lakeview bar-arcade hybrid, because you'll need two hands to get through the White Castle slider-topped bloody mary. Below the burger marches a parade of pickled veggies, meats and cheeses. Once you've eaten your way through that gauntlet, you'll reach the drink itself: a sriracha and horseradish-flecked housemade mix with a base of basil- and garlic-infused vodka.

When a restaurant is known for its wings, why not throw one on a bloody mary? Under the bone-in barbecued pork "wing" rests a bacon-y bloody mary that begins with pepper-and-bacon-flavored vodka and gets a swift and spicy boost from a hefty dose of steak sauce and Worcestershire.

It might be easier to list items not skewered atop this massive Mary. If you make your way through a chunk of monterrey jack cheese, a smoked chicken wing, picked asparagus, three strips of anise rubbed bacon, a mini corndog, a half stick of mozzarella cheese and a sriracha glazed grilled shrimp, there's a light and spicy bloody mary waiting to reward you.