My 14 month old has recently begun playing with the Fisher Price Laugh and Learn Puppy. It’s a great toy (and about half her size) and she loves it. When you press its feet, it says, “Feet!”. Or when you press its ear, it says, “Ear!” You get the picture. It also plays music. Typical learning with fun toy. But this toy dog does something else that I’ve seen a lot of toys do… it validates my child as a worthy member of the human race.

The dog is sitting on the couch, happily awaiting its next pressed appendage, when out of the blue it starts talking:

“You’re my friend.”

“I love you.”

“You’re lots of fun.”

Why does my child need a real friend when she has a stuffed dog that spits out stock loving and adoring statements at the touch of a paw? And what does this teach my child about true compliments and validation? Do we do a disservice to our children by teaching them that they’re lovable, fun, and can earn a best friend simply by whacking a stuffed toy against the floor to make it talk?

Granted, I like this toy. I’m going to let her continue to play with it as long as she likes. Maybe I’m just jealous. I mean, where’s my toy that tells me my boobs and *ss are still just as hot, even though I’ve had a baby, hmm?