Free Holiday Mask

Who doesn’t love the Olsen Twins? We all know that the Olsen twins have made a ton of cash just because they were born. Oh sure, they do work hard. It’s all they’ve ever known. But apparently, these twins really like fur. No not burgers, but clothes. Of course it is very important to dress nice while the paparrazzi is following you everywhere, or you will be the laughing stock of all of the trashy magazines. But there are other things to be careful of – like giving pain pills to other celebrities for instance. Sure, that could cause some bad press. Or maybe getting caught spreading your legs while you aren’t wearing underwear. Pretty standard stuff for normal folks, but for celebs, these are really difficult rules to follow.

If there is an entire organization of people that are out to get you because you like to wear fur, then by all means, quit wearing fur. Now, I don’t always agree with Peta. I like to eat meat. But Peta introduced me to the horrors of the meat industry. So now I do my absolute best to avoid companies that produce and harvest animals in a cruel way. I buy free-range meat now, with no hormones injected. And guess what? That meat tastes far better. And I’m feeling healthier. Believe it or not, treating an animal with respect and dignity actually will make it taste better. And refusing to buy products from places like Tyson chicken will either put them out of business or force them to adopt business practices that are more in line with traditional farming, rather than massive factory farms, where people and animals are abused.

So do your part. Get a free Halloween costume of the Trollsen Twins. You can save money on costumes, make fun of the Olsen twins, support animal rights and possibly impress Pamela Anderson. Did you see what she did for Hef’s birthday? I know he loves animals. If we could only get him to treat women with the same amount of dignity.