Message To AnnaLynne McCord And All Really Hot Actresses: You Can’t Be Dorks

On the Tonight Show last night, 90210’sAnnaLynne McCord pulled my #1 actress interview pet peeve by describing herself as an “uber-dork,” pretending to be embarrassed by her dorkiness and mentioning how she goes for dorky guys, and eliciting the expected, easy cheers from a crowd of, well, actual dorks.

You can watch the AnnaLynne clip here. Dork convo starts about 2/3 of the way in.

A quick reminder to AnnaLynne McCord, and to all actresses, models, and hot chicks in general:

YOU CAN’T BE DORKS.

While you may enjoy things that in some way overlap with what society traditionally deems as dorky, you are still a hot chick and can have sex with any number of men at will, thus granting you access to any social circle and preventing you from ever being legitimately socially awkward, no matter how you behave. Pretending to act like you’re a nerd because you don’t want to come off as an arrogant actress who knows she’s hot isn’t fooling anyone.

So what makes Hottie McModelson such a “dork,” you ask?

When asked to explain what makes her an “uber-dork,” McCord tells Conan that — NERD ALERT!!!!!!!! — she’s a huge fan of the Star Wars movies. That’s it. Sorry to burst your thin nerdbubble, hot actress lady, but liking the Star Wars movies — three of the highest-grossing, most mainstream, and widely beloved films in cinematic history — does not in any way, shape, or form make you even close to being a dork, let alone an uber-dork, or an uber-anything, other than an uber-still a hot actress who happens to like a movie that all people like.

If you’re reading Knights of the Old Republic graphic novels and pointing out chronological inconsistencies, then yes, that might qualify you to use the term “dork” in describing yourself, but even then, when you frickin’ look like this, dudes will line up to f*** you no matter how much fan fiction you write. In fact, they’ll f*** you as you’re writing it. And probably finish quicker because of it.

To actually be a “dork” implies some degree of social ineptitude or embrace of aspects of culture that may not be considered cool or mainstream, but which in turn unite those social outcasts in their own small way. Hot chicks co-opting the term “dork” to make themselves appear more adorable because they watched a movie that grossed a billion dollars undermines the entire concept of the term, and insults actual dorks Middle Earth-wide.

Bottom line, let’s just drop the pretense; you can still be a likable hot actress without having to act like you don’t know you’re a hot actress. We’ll save the term “dork” for this dude.