Comeback kid Lord Peter Mandelson will tell MPs later today that he is attempting to speed up the release of £1bn of European Investment Bank money for small businesses.
The government has also pledged to pay small businesses within 10 days by working closely with NHS trusts in England, local authorities and other public sector …

I don't want any Government Minister's arm around my shoulder...

picking my pocket still further. Least of all Peter Mandelson's. He is a principled, honourable and reliable Lord (to be?) who has only had to leave Government twice already and so is a very appropriate figure to look after the interest of small businesses.

Oh, by the way, can anyone supply a list of small businesses that work with the Government and who can therefore expect payment in 10 days. I expect the majority of the group are Parliamentary "Consultants". There may be some working for Local Government but do you seriously expect anybody in any position of power in the pubic, corporate or private sector to give a toss about what happens to small businesses. It is, sadly, nonsensical rhetoric.

So, is Mandy starting a small business then?

So they'll stop f'ing startups then?

The bulk of my work may get me clobbered by IR35, yet I am trying to build a new business on the back of it.

But I can effectively only invest money in my new project after having paid a much higher rate of tax than would otherwise be the case, and there is a ceiling on what I can take as expenses - which funnily enough none of my would-be [and larger] competitors face.

Rather the embrace of an anaconda.

Mandy has been in a small way of business for quite some time. Hardly has he returned from exile in Europe before new allegations emerge that he has been enjoying the hospitality of a Russian billionaire on board his luxury yacht. The wunderkind dismisses suggestions that there is any connection between the fact that he has been negotiating European import tariffs for aluminium and the fact that the Russian's aluminium business would benefit from a lowering of the tariff.

Well, Pete, whatever you do I'm sure it's only for the public benefit, mate. I am sure you were misquoted when you were reported as saying NuLabour was "‘intensely relaxed about people getting filthy rich’. ..." and omitted to say "at other people's expense."