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I
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JOHN IS THERE.
"Hungry" John Rigef of Sha
mokin, Pa., never has, to be cajled
twice to dinper. The other day
his, wife was a bit slow with tjje
"eats' and John went down town
for a bite. He ate a peck of apples,
including skin and seeds, and
topped it off with a pig watermel
on. And next morning he was as
hungry as ever. In 57 minutes he
gpt on the outride pf five quarts
of peanuts and 3? glasses of beer,
and then went home and "jawed"'
at his wife because she had only
three pounds of beefsteak," pota
toes, beans, cabbage and a few
other things for lunch.
o o
2-MIIf UTE VAUDEVILLE
Thud Did you see where they
want to coin fyalf cent pieces "for
us?
"Slap Is that so? Which half
of a cent do they want to coin ?
Thud What do you mearr?
Either half of whole pent will
make a whole fyaif cent.
Slap If they make a half of a
whole with a hole in it, will they
make a whole half with a half of a
hole, ox will the hole in the half
be a whole hole?
Thud Why, is a whole is twice
as much as a half, a whole with a
hole ought to make a half with
two holes, but properly the holes
in the halves should be'' half holes,
or two of them, would make more
than one whole hole.
Slap Thanks, if that is the
hole truth, you have put me on
the right cent. This smaller
money at any rate, ought to be a
boon to the poor.
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IBr hs! 'Blillll
fir . Hrpi! irai!
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si njoi-oinivviM gai
' Thud It will double their for
tunes. But what do you think I
could buy with a half cent?
Slap You could buy the con
tempt of everybody.
Thud Still, I could make-my
money go twice as far.
Slap -Yes, it wouldhave to go
twice 'as far before y6u could pass
it anywhere.
Thud But I could jingle
money in my pocket even if I was
down to my last cent. ;
Slap If you were down to
your last cent it would be plural,
unless you would divide it with
me.
Thud Yes, if I would divided
my last cent with you it certainly J
would be singular.
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