It Doesn’t Hold You Back, It Changes Who You Are

When traveling this thing called life, we always come upon crossroads:

A couple trying to decide if it’s the right time to have a baby. “We should make more money.” “We need a bigger house.” “We should have more in savings.” “What about a college fund?” They sit and ponder all the changes that will take place, and then anticipate and reflect on whether they are really ready for the change.

Or

A single guy contemplating asking his girlfriend to marry him. Lots of his friends are getting married; it’s the natural thing to do, right? But what about his freedom? What if it changes his relationship with the woman he loves? Will they end up fighting all the time; end up on the road to divorce? He worries over all the little details, wondering if the change is really worth it.

Or

The couple wanting to make a big move to another location. They are in the throes of an empty nest. “Our house is too big.” “We have too much stuff.” “But should we really move away from all that we know?” The longer they’ve been in their local community, the longer they’ve been in their current home, the more difficult the decision becomes.

The concept of change is always difficult, no matter how large or small it is. But when it has the potential to change your life forever, it moves to an entirely different category altogether.

Fear sets in. And in many cases it’s easier to do nothing at all then to risk facing a change that could completely alter your life forever.

When most people face a monumental change, they usually spend time contemplating all the things that could wrong in the process. Sure, there might be some good things that come out of it; that’s why you’re thinking about it. But what about all the bad? That’s where fear lies. That’s why in many cases it feels like you are walking through glue to make a final decision.

If a couple is trying to decide whether to have a child, its easy to come up with the reasons why you shouldn’t, no matter how much you love the concept of having a sweet little baby in your arms. You won’t be able to travel like you used to. Friday dinner dates are out. Instead of that new car you’ve been dreaming about, it’ll all go to diapers, and toys, and daycare, and education, and … you get the picture.

Why would you ever want to do something so scary?

Look at all things it will hold you back from.

Or will it?

Every choice presented to you, every decision that comes your way doesn’t come with the caveat of holding you back; instead it offers you a chance to change who you are.

Because whether you gravitate towards the change or choose to do nothing at all, you’re going to change either way whether you like it or not.

Indecision is inaction. And inaction brings you more of the same in your life.

But even if you choose to stand still and accept more of the same, those around you will face their own decisions and set out on their own quests. So even if you choose to stay where you are, those around you could make what you thought was a sound decision null and void.

If you approach a new decision with the thought of how it will hold you back, you miss the opportunity of what this new item could bring your way.

The only way to change, to grow, is to take action. And the only way to take action is to make a decision and be happy with the direction you’ve chosen. Because nothing will ever be clear, in focus, the correct path, or full of success. Yes, you’ll fail. But you’ll learn as well. And that’s the key. The more you grow, the more you learn, the more you change. And in every case, its all about becoming the best “you” you can be.