We are constantly updating our lives through social media and creating the ideal highlight reel because we are afraid to show the public what real life actually is. I can’t be the only person who agrees to this, we want to show those moments from some of our most memorable vacations, the birth of a new child, the fancy new car or the day we graduate.

While these should all be celebrated, we should also not be afraid of exposing the truth behind all of these accomplishments.

You are GOOD enough, FINE enough, STRONG enough and SMART enough. You do not need the validity of others to prove to the world your value

I’ll use myself as an example, I have always been shall we say an “overachiever” and was always compelled to prove a point that my life was nothing less than perfect. I thought to myself, why…..why are we programmed to only show people the positive side of our lives? Are we afraid to show the real truth behind the highlight reel we share on our news feed because we feel that people will think less of us?

The late nights spent studying for that final, feeling like giving up because the mental headache got the best of us. The grueling hours that a young entrepreneur spent building their business and only to be told they were lucky, lucky not being the reason but that the young entrepreneur put their heart and soul and spent hours, days and months chasing their goals. What about that picture perfect relationship? do you think that couple got there by chance? or it was love at first sight? we don’t see those disagreements, the frustration and the tears, the long distance that separates them and their only form of communication is late night conversations on the phone or Skype dates.

I felt a strong urge to find out why this is, after reading article after article, it became a trend that we want to always prove a point and to feel accepted by others. We want to feel like we’re apart of something and to gain validation from our peers.

1. The truth is, just be yourself

Be unapologetically you, the people who love and admire you know your worth and appreciate your accomplishments. We spend so much time comparing ourselves and our path to others when we don’t realize everyone is just trying to reach the same thing. If we spend more time on our goals and aspirations and less time focused on others then we are only limiting our potential.

2. Be the change YOU wish to see in the world

No one has control over your life other than YOU. We use fear as an excuse of moving forward, stress over our past or focus solely on aiming for the future instead of appreciating the present moment. Imagine a life for yourself that you wake up to with no regrets and you can smile knowing you put your heart into each and every move to get to that point. We can’t change if we don’t start to make small steps towards obtaining a personal goal without first altering your mindset and your attitude. You can’t expect to grow without change.

3. There is no finish line

We’re always trying to reach for something; there is this constant want in our lives. We want more money, we want a new car, we want a bigger house, or the latest buzzworthy tech gadget. Our wants never end. What we don’t realize is we forget to live in the moment and accept and appreciate the things we do have. We’re happy temporarily until the honeymoon phase wears off and that want no longer is desirable and then we move on to the next thing. What we don’t realize is those things only give us a temporary high of happiness, we forget to appreciate the climb to the top of reaching for our achievements.

4. The fear of failure

It’s scary to admit to failure, we want to constantly succeed because any less and we attract the unwanted negativity that comes with failing. No one ever succeeded without first failing, it makes you stronger and wiser. We commonly want to prove a point to others to validate our existence.

Some of the most successful people have been rejected, turned down or were doubted. These actions for as we know helped some of the most well known figures such as Oprah Winfrey who was fired from her television job for being too “emotionally invested” or Walt Disney who was told he wasn’t creative enough.

While those are just a few to name, they have similar things in common is they turned something that could have been projected as negative and made it into something positive.

Use failure as a tool to learn and to grow, use rejection as a form of fuel to your fire and to always motivate you.

5. You can’t impress everyone

No matter how glamorous your life looks on the outside, there will always be that person who still has something to say. Truth is, we can’t impress everyone. Trying to constantly fit into a cookie cutter mold gets exhausting, we forget why we’re doing what we’re doing and for what. People will always be opinionated and just let them formulate their own opinions. No one knows your life like YOU do. End each day with what makes you happy and motivates you.

We spend so much time living our lives for others when all we want to do is live it how we intend to. Things would be much more different if we all practiced living a life that is unapologetically our own and we manifested our goals and aspirations. Find those that you love who support you and keep them close because those are the ones who know us best.