Confessions of a food whore and reluctant fan of Antonio Banderas. I realize that's sickening. This blog does not seek to educate, only to destroy. I mean only to educate people about Uranus.

February 26, 2005

Check Her Mouth After

Check Her Mouth After

I can't muster up any fury, because it's not a horrible story, but this bitch makes all women look bad. Don't be afraid to save a man's sperm after he jizzes in your mouth, then use it to impregnate yourself after you guys break up.

To top it off, the bitch sued for child support. Don't get me wrong, if a man has regular intercourse with a woman, regardless of whether or not he wants the baby he should have to pay child support. Even if he used a condom, or she said she was on the pill, or he pulled and prayed, if the kid is his he should have to pay child support. But this guy didn't engage in any behavior in which pregnancy was a possible consequence (unless one is spitting sperm out into a turkey baster then banging it.) It's galling that she's going to be rewarded for her actions. The court's decision would make sense if both parties had differing stories and the court didn't know who to believe. I didn't think it was even possible but she's admitted to doing it. I can understand them dismissing the theft charge but fraud seemed appropriate. Yes, his payments are in the interest of the child. But it still seems unreasonable.

I wish I could read the court's case summary. In my head it looks like this:

Plaintiff is charging the defendant with fraud, maintaining that the defendant broke their verbal agreement on proper disposal of the disputed sperm. The afmorementioned verbal agreement was effected the moment the plaintiff said "Oh baby, get ready to swallow, I'm coming" and the defendant assented by saying "mmmpppffhhhhh."

Serously though, if she wanted a baby so bad, she should have found herself a consenting participant or visited a sperm bank. And if she was willing to go to such lengths to have a child, she should be able to pay for the child's upkeep herself. She's a fucking doctor, she's at least making decent money. Although, if I were one of her patients I'd be a bit worried about her judgment.

I wonder if her "success" is going to inspire other psycho ass women. Word of advice guys... If your woman runs out of the room after she gives you a blowjob, better follow her and make sure she spits it out and gargles. Parenthood does rock, but not if the mother of your child is a psycho hose beast.