tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post2213798213953965237..comments2016-12-08T17:42:34.372-08:00Comments on HoseMaster of Wine™: Little Jimmy Steward, Child MSRon Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comBlogger24125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-647627839382876872013-04-08T12:14:29.121-07:002013-04-08T12:14:29.121-07:00Kudos! Terrific piece.
Hoping Samantha is going t...Kudos! Terrific piece.<br /><br />Hoping Samantha is going to have copies of Somm at the Wine Country for giggles. Cris Whetstonehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00580386535702366380noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-69437590511040745052013-04-05T14:58:51.973-07:002013-04-05T14:58:51.973-07:00Dean,
I&#39;ve always said that the only original ...Dean,<br />I&#39;ve always said that the only original artwork I&#39;d want to own is the original of &quot;Dogs Playing Poker.&quot; Though &quot;Somms Playing Poker&quot; might be cool, as long as it&#39;s painted on velvet.<br /><br />Dogs don&#39;t tend to like wine, in my experience. I think the number of aromatic compounds in your average Pinot Noir overwhelms their mighty noses. Plus, if the dog tasting next to you is wet, all the wines smell corked. And, actually, I almost wrote a piece about a canine sommelier--he&#39;d be the only sommelier that only licks his own butt.<br /><br />My Gorgeous Samantha,<br />Don&#39;t let that happen! But now that you mention it, I do need more female admirers around here. Some days it&#39;s way too much of a dick show.<br /><br />Doug,<br />Thanks for dropping by the asylum. Seems I was misinformed about your written exam for your MS. But I did see where it received two Smiley Faces from the judges and you were given the ceremonial Master Sommelier noogies. Congrats on that!<br /><br />Man, you never know who&#39;s lurking around here. Goddam Google Alert. I need to mention more porn actresses.Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-53877873111706430592013-04-05T14:05:36.017-07:002013-04-05T14:05:36.017-07:00It was not crayons! It was cray-pas, cuz I&#39;m a...It was not crayons! It was cray-pas, cuz I&#39;m a classy guy!<br /><br />Doug Frosthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15061305335522312686noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-14526758935323621782013-04-05T13:18:18.037-07:002013-04-05T13:18:18.037-07:00Yikes, I think Dean may have passed even me in the...Yikes, I think Dean may have passed even me in the heart-on for Washam category...Samantha Duganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05214278596698698245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-52102807485382468262013-04-05T13:09:11.702-07:002013-04-05T13:09:11.702-07:00Lotsa good stuff here, beginning with &quot;reserv...Lotsa good stuff here, beginning with &quot;reservations&quot; (yeah, I&#39;ve had reservations about that place too)...You do know that 9 human years is 63 in dog years, the cur...all wineries have dogs...all dogs have Robert Parker to thank for that...63&#39;s not too old...just watch out for the dog sommelier&#39;s tastevin: they tend to get lapped....wasn&#39;t there a painting about dog sommeliers? or was that poker? <br /><br />Speak to me, Ron: you are the greatest....Dean Tudorhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09027150351344396656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-1691723385392042592013-04-05T07:57:17.330-07:002013-04-05T07:57:17.330-07:00Loved the Miley &amp; Cab comparison, outstanding ...Loved the Miley &amp; Cab comparison, outstanding start to the day.Unknownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05783753821337837698noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-71857838645927018562013-04-04T20:09:46.524-07:002013-04-04T20:09:46.524-07:00Lol. I&#39;ve been comparing it to putting toppin...Lol. I&#39;ve been comparing it to putting toppings on a burger and calling yourself a chefgabriel jaglehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13849290999060380035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-37365719570700845802013-04-04T17:48:10.327-07:002013-04-04T17:48:10.327-07:00Gabe,
Sounds like you need to start your own blog....Gabe,<br />Sounds like you need to start your own blog. Unless you want to write a guest post here.<br /><br />Are there any sommeliers that actually make their own wines? It seems they mostly sit in on the blending trials, which is like going to a table reading and then saying you wrote the play. Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-76279569000667727602013-04-04T17:36:07.996-07:002013-04-04T17:36:07.996-07:00i&#39;ve been waiting for you to write an article ...i&#39;ve been waiting for you to write an article about a somm describing how wine is made: &quot;first come up with a concept, then some stuff happens, taste some barrel samples, some other stuff happens, and you&#39;ve got wine!&quot;gabriel jaglehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13849290999060380035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-57532731708534298132013-04-04T17:26:32.737-07:002013-04-04T17:26:32.737-07:00Gabe,
Oh, don&#39;t worry, Jimmy has his own wine ...Gabe,<br />Oh, don&#39;t worry, Jimmy has his own wine in the works. It will be the classic sommelier wine--low alcohol, low scores, high price.Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-65234615604405759512013-04-04T17:19:20.255-07:002013-04-04T17:19:20.255-07:00i loved the last line. can&#39;t wait for him to ...i loved the last line. can&#39;t wait for him to release his own labelgabriel jaglehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13849290999060380035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-74522249256056187022013-04-04T13:56:58.723-07:002013-04-04T13:56:58.723-07:00Quizicat:
You haven&#39;t been looking closely en...Quizicat:<br /><br />You haven&#39;t been looking closely enough. Underneath those biodynamic reds is orange.Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07322028233207741737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-27342153701967576492013-04-04T11:11:10.133-07:002013-04-04T11:11:10.133-07:00Ah it reminds me of an oft used and occasionally a...Ah it reminds me of an oft used and occasionally appreciated comment I&#39;ve made to lady friends... At your Cervix Madame!<br /><br />And do they actually make Orange wines? Perhaps they just haven&#39;t made it to the east coast. Since I only drink reds, they could be the gateway drug to whites for me.Quizicathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09511230410196866834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-21676155729396665492013-04-04T11:10:18.470-07:002013-04-04T11:10:18.470-07:00Marcia Love,
Thanks, as always. I just liked the ...Marcia Love,<br />Thanks, as always. I just liked the conceit of a child sommelier and MS. I do wish I&#39;d come up with a better name for him, though. Any suggestions?<br /><br />Thomas,<br />Assyrtiko could only be a Greek variety. <br /><br />David,<br />Funny you should ask. I was contemplating a piece entitled, &quot;Why I Was a Lousy Sommelier.&quot; I still may write it. I had a sort of a monkey suit--a horrible polyester jacket--but didn&#39;t wear a tastevin. I loved the job, but have no idea how customers or others in the biz remember me. But I should write that piece.Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-17383787704537541902013-04-04T10:44:08.366-07:002013-04-04T10:44:08.366-07:00Great stuff as always Ron.. just curious, what wer...Great stuff as always Ron.. just curious, what were you like as som for 19 years? Wear the monkey suit, the cowbell? Make dickhead suggestions just to be a pompous asshole.. sell expensive wines just to please the owner? ha ha.. there&#39;s grist for a great column.. spill spill spill.. confess! confess confess!David Piersonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11992278224164669829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-50563075616850660762013-04-04T10:17:25.746-07:002013-04-04T10:17:25.746-07:00Yes, many good ones in this one. I vote for: &quot...Yes, many good ones in this one. I vote for: &quot;...except in Greece, where they have the sense to worship young boys...&quot;<br /><br />Made me stop reading--I can&#39;t simultaneously laugh and read. Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07322028233207741737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-81026625371531648132013-04-04T10:06:42.487-07:002013-04-04T10:06:42.487-07:00So many wonderful bits (and even the best HoseMast...So many wonderful bits (and even the best HoseMaster groaners -- the ones you can&#39;t not include)!<br /><br />From &quot;Poached Per Se&quot; to &quot;Grower Champagne Tit-du-Cuvee&quot; and even the &quot;cervix professional&quot; (rat-a-tat-tat!), what a great way to start the day. A gem!Marcia Macomberhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07237764449953259939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-34806384271528938502013-04-04T09:32:02.412-07:002013-04-04T09:32:02.412-07:00My Gorgeous Samantha,
&quot;Potemkin villages&quot...My Gorgeous Samantha,<br />&quot;Potemkin villages&quot; is exactly right, and for most awards, which tend to be about the people who give them rather than the folks who receive them.<br /><br />On your recommendation, I will make it a point to see SOMM. Is there any nudity? Or should I just watch it naked? Wanna watch it with me?<br /><br />The cream-filled Boner in a Can is fine, but most folks prefer Crunchy Boner in a Can. Me, I like the free magnifying glass.Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-10347096400562759532013-04-04T09:20:37.905-07:002013-04-04T09:20:37.905-07:00Ron My Love,
A friend got me a copy of SOMM, it ha...Ron My Love,<br />A friend got me a copy of SOMM, it hasn&#39;t been released yet but I do hope you take the time to see it. It is a great film and for people in our industry, especially people like you and I that don&#39;t take this stuff too seriously, it is a truly fascinating and compelling film. I wanted to watch it again when it was over but I wanted to send it to a friend with whom I share similar opinions and knew he would love it...and I wanted someone to talk to about it, so I didn&#39;t get the chance to watch it again before having to return it. <br /><br />One guy I know went on a tear about it, all passion filled and acting like this movie was going to prove something and the thing is, it does but not in the way he thought it might. Can&#39;t wait to hear how he spins things when he does finally see it. Kinda looking forward to the after with that movie.<br /><br />No, wanker is not my new word, I&#39;ve always used and adored wanker/wankers, beef-witted is my NEW one. Well that and when referring to wine blogs and awards, Potemkin villages. And for the record, I don&#39;t eat anything from a can, not even the things with a cream filling... Samantha Duganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05214278596698698245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-36516648929194828302013-04-04T09:12:14.222-07:002013-04-04T09:12:14.222-07:00Charlie,
With Boner in a Can, you can choose betwe...Charlie,<br />With Boner in a Can, you can choose between the inhaler, or the convenient suppository. Finger-lickin&#39; good!Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-46703944338202803472013-04-04T09:06:29.676-07:002013-04-04T09:06:29.676-07:00Sam is simply in love with your new status as &quo...Sam is simply in love with your new status as &quot;bloke in a can&quot;.<br /><br />Do you spray it on or inject it?Charlie Olkenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02513782687786106137noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-36990933095656448032013-04-04T08:47:08.343-07:002013-04-04T08:47:08.343-07:00Charlie,
One day the idea of a kid MS just jumped ...Charlie,<br />One day the idea of a kid MS just jumped into my head-sort of Doogie Howser in the wine business--and it started to make comedic sense. Especially now that I&#39;m old. The zingers just come from a disturbed place.<br /><br />My Gorgeous Samantha,<br />I haven&#39;t seen SOMM, but have no desire to. I&#39;m glad you loved this piece. I like its tone, and even its pace. <br /><br />I had a laughable experience with a sommelier not too long ago, which probably inspired some of the zingers. Something about the title and the monkey suit that brings out the arrogant and presumptuous in people. Because you know a bit about wine doesn&#39;t mean you get a pass on hospitality and service.<br /><br />And so &quot;wankers&quot; is your new word? Ron Washam, HMWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11238869156614617705noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-75160193068536142232013-04-04T08:38:52.358-07:002013-04-04T08:38:52.358-07:00Skinning my knees while going down easy was in fac...Skinning my knees while going down easy was in fact how I passed my MS exam. Loved this piece Ron, especially seeing as I watched SOMM a couple of weeks ago, which I loved but man...aint going to change anyone&#39;s mind that thinks somms are either wankers, or full of absolute shit. I love you!Samantha Duganhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05214278596698698245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745003136564123305.post-23604263617949276912013-04-04T08:30:42.243-07:002013-04-04T08:30:42.243-07:00The zingers. So many. Such a nice take on the somm...The zingers. So many. Such a nice take on the somms who know everything but know nothing because they read it all in books and can pass tests.<br /><br />Well, give them time. They will get old and be able to serve without needing a step stool to reach the table.Charlie Olkenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02513782687786106137noreply@blogger.com