Zealandia will become little more than a “cat food factory” unless something is done about wandering felines, the Wellington City Council has been told.

Hearings began today for submissions into the council’s draft annual plan, with philanthropist and anti-cat campaigner Gareth Morgan among the first to address councillors.

He advocated councils making micro-chipping mandatory for cats to determine ownership, so un-owned cats could be “zipped” and any pets caught wandering could be returned for a fee. There should also be a 24-hour curfew on cats, with them only allowed out on leashes.

Yes, cats only allowed outside on leashes. I can see that happening – not.

Share this:

Related posts:

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 26th, 2014 at 9:00 am and is filed under New Zealand.
You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
Both comments and pings are currently closed.

53 Responses to “Morgan advocates all cats on Wellington to be on leashes”

Mr. Morgan REALLY doesn’t like cats does he? One has to wonder why? Presumably he adores dogs and has several of
his own ? He also doesn’t know the feline species very well (as much as one ever can know cats, that is) , and has not obviously not heard the saying about the consequences of ‘trying to herd cats’.

Those who passed the original legislation concerning the control of cats and dogs in New Zealand were realists and aware of the differences between dogs and cats. They were also aware, like Kipling, of the nature of cats, as summarised in Kipling’s classic tale about the cat who walks by himself, and who says ‘all places are alike to me’ . The legislation was enacted accordingly.

Unfortunately, Mr. Morgan is a man with a large amount of money at his disposal, evidently a lot of time on his hands, and, from all reports, a council which is prepared to act on his ‘recommendations’. It will be interesting to see public reaction when it does.

BTW: Has anyone read the story of Dick Whittington recently – and how he made his money?

He advocated councils making micro-chipping mandatory for cats ‘Gareth Morgans’ to determine ownership, so un-owned cats ‘Gareth Morgans’ could be “zipped” and any pets ‘Gareth Morgans’ caught wandering could be returned for a fee. There should also be a 24-hour curfew on cats ‘Gareth Morgans’, with them only allowed out on leashes’

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.
3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.
6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously.
7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil, and blow down drinking straw.
9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
10. Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door onto neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of Scotch. Pour shot, drink. 12. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
13. Call fire brigade to retrieve the damn cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.
14. Tie the little @!!@#@#$%’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of steak filet. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
15. Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and remove pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
16. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

There is a Facebook page entitled Cats Against Gareth Morgan, for that matter. I would encourage all Kiwiblog readers who enjoy a good laugh to join this furry feline fightback for purr-sonal liberties. Actually, come to think of it, cats are very libertarian animals. They take liberties all the time. And sausages, in the case of our mog, Bebert

3. Introduce your cat to its gear. Allow your cat to gradually become familiar with the smell of the harness, leash and collar.

4. Put the harness on the cat. Don’t force your cat to wear the harness; ensure you cat associates it with pleasure. For the first time, only put the harness on your cat for 30 seconds and remove it three or four times. Give long breaks between sessions to get used to getting in and out of the harness.

5. Let your cat drag the leash. Fasten the leash to the harness and let your cat get used to the weight. Stand on the opposite side of the room and call your cat. After a few days, when it comes consistently, begin walking it around the house.

6. Associate the harness with the outdoors. The sooner your cat learns the harness means outside, the easier this process will become.

7. Encourage calmness. If your cat loses control, discourage this behavior by standing still. Your cat will soon learn that it can explore only when calm.

8. Choose relaxing situations. You can’t expect calmness next to a busy intersection or in the path of another animal. Keep an eye out for trouble before it arrives.

9. Follow your cats lead. Let your cat take the lead to build trust and make the experience more pleasant for you both. Your cat will want to explore and sniff the great outdoors. Always keeps the leash slack.

10. Start with short trips. Familiarize your cat with the area immediately around your home, and then gradually increase the distance you walk.

Every mainstream opinion was once eccentric. Gareth is absolutely correct that cats are a major destroyer of native fauna – birds, lizards, skinks. This has been proven beyond doubt. Dogs can attack humans, and are registered, chipped, impounded, put down etc. Cats destroy our ecology, and Gareth Morgan is pilloried for pointing this out.

LOL whoever wrote that doesn’t have a cat, or at least doesn’t have a cat like the cat’s I’ve owned.

They need to add that the cat owner should be on prozac, be wearing a thick raincoat, and leather gloves, before attempting any of the above. A dram or two of whiskey before attempting it, might also help (its optional on whether you give the whiskey to the cat, or drink it yourself)

I’m not saying that cat owners should be irresponsible- certainly, we should insure that our companion animals are neutered, not abandon them needlessly otherwise or irresponsibly dump them in the public domain, avoid cat hoarding at the other extreme and insure that our pets have access to optimal veterinary care. However, what proportion of wildlife are killed by other animals- rats, stoats and other introduced predators? And are they adequately controlled?

I seriously have doubts about that man I have had lots of cats they have never brought back a native bird but have brought back lots of rats.

he needs to look at an excellent video called how wolves change rivers.

I live over the back from a prestigious girls school when the cat population is down the neighbours are infested with rats .. healthy cat numbers = little or no rat problems ( other than the ones they bring in and liberate under the fridge. )

Despite Morgan’s obvious obsessiveness with this, I think he actually has a point. Native birds or European cats? I’d go as far as to make cat bells and collars compulsory, and restrict each household to one cat. Having tuis, kakas around our homes is worth it.

Has Morgan apologised for visiting North Korea and ignoring the horrific human rights abuses there? If not, why aren’t we shunning him as being a dreadful human being? The weird cat obsession is just a side show.

AFIK (or am aware), no one actually knows the casualty-rate inflicted on the country’s wildlife by other predators. At best DoC can give estimates based-upon their observations. Cats OTOH are easy targets; they are visible and they are ‘easy’ (in a relative sense) to target. They are also ‘obvious’ (unlike rats, stoats, weasels etc.) and the general-public has a perception concerning them, in that they either like or loath them. Cats are also ‘mysterious’ and self-contained (unlike dogs, with which species, ‘What you see is what you get’), and historically have been the subject of a lot of prejudice throughout the centuries because of this aspect of their make-up. Given all of this in combination, what better target for someone who is a closet cat-hater (for whatever reason), especially when one adds-in the fact that they (the cats) kill ‘all de pwetty liddle boids’ (sarcasm intended) . The result: Instant support from al those who either: Own dogs in preference to cats (and are passionate about their dogs) ; hate cats (again, for whatever reason), or love birds; or are environmentalists….

Mr. Morgan seems to appeal to all such people, and as a result is now a very popular individual.

Given that the removal of cats from circulation has ‘unintended consequences’ (c.f Dick Whittington, as previously noted), I wonder if the WCC will issue its residents with (humane – of course) rat traps, when the rodent problem becomes too large?

freedom 101 – wrong. Yr ‘science’ is crap. I am fed up to the back teeth with with idiots parroting what they’ve read in the newspapers or internet, and with no context within which to evaluate the information.

Fair enough, but this is a man whose academic approach is untrustworthy. He tells us unequivocally that cats destroy native bird populations in New Zealand, where they are apex predators. He also assures us that life in North Korea is rosy because he was taken on a guided tour of happy inmates. ‘Nuff said.

He sends cats to Kim Jong Un to feed starving plebs. Because of his nuclear programme costs, he can’t afford food as well. Morgan says North Korea is a great place, well run, with cat the staple diet, along with stale rice . . . he is another reborn socialist with a distorted outlook on life and trivia.

A thought which has just occurred (yes, that does happen – sometimes):

With Mr.Morgan being so passionate about preserving ‘native species’ perhaps he should raise his sights slightly and divert his millions to provide food to the the ‘poor’ of New Zealand; the people who are definitely a ‘native species'; and ‘endangered’ (for whatever reason, which is not the point of this post) ), and proceed to carry out the necessary actions without benefit of media and publicity. In times past that was called ‘philanthropy’, and was done quietly and without ostentation (and without political associations).

I would suggest that taking that course of action would be a better use of his money, and, dare I say it, for a better cause and long-term benefit , but hey, it will never be never as sexy and sensational as saving birds by killing cats….

komatua: The only poor in this country, are in most cases, too lazy to get off their backsides, or those that breed for welfare income. So long as these people get handouts, they will be satisfied voting Labour, showing envy of those that have worked and achieved, being housed, breeding to excess, having their unwanted feral kids fed, using pre-school as a crèche while they go boozing, drugging, and being a general nuisance and drain on overburdened taxpayers. No matter what philanthropy may provide these types will do less and want more!

No one should own a cat unless they keep the bloody thing on their own property unless strictly controlled.

So Tinman, you would be quite happy to have entire neighbourhoods turned into steel link fence enclosures, because that’s the only way that a cat can be kept in a property. Unless people want stir-crazy bored ones that just live inside, and that’s just cruel.

I am for micro chipping cats. It is cheap. And it will reduce the number of native birds killed by cats. More Tuis and Native wood pidgeons etc in our cities would be great. Those who can’t afford it need to understand cats are not native animals, and unless sponsored by a owner they have no right to be in New Zealand. Sorry puss but your owner doesn’t love you you are gone burgers.

Oh fuck off cat haters. cats have no real impact on native bird pipulations. But your houses and flushing toilets sure as shit do have an impact
Furthermore, New Zealand bird life is overrated. Like absent.Here in California I have daily flocks of blue Jays and Finches and lone hummingbirds; a shit ton prettier and more prolific than stupid ass Tuis or Sparrows.