Fighting Cancer through Comics

A widow gives hope to children fighting cancer with a unique graphic novel that contains Jewish themes.

“Yaakov didn’t lose his fight to cancer. Even after death, his fight continues and he continues to bring life and hope.”

This is the attitude of Yaakov’s widow, Shira Frimer. In the 15 years since her husband’s death, she has been a fighter against cancer. Her efforts brightened the lives of thousands of children and there is no sign of her slowing down. Her children, faith, love, and her late husband are her inspiration.

In 1994, Yaakov Frimer was a 19 year old soldier in the Israel Defense Forces. Charismatic, with a bright future ahead, he asked Shira, also 19 at the time, to marry him. Later that year, he was diagnosed with Ewing’s Sarcoma – a rare form of pediatric cancer that grows inside of the patient’s bones.

Despite the disease, the couple wed in 1995 and in the ensuing five years, Yaakov went into remission twice, and sadly, relapsed twice. During the healthy times, they had their wedding and started a family with the birth of twin boys in 1996.

While fighting the disease, the couple eventually decided to move to Shira’s hometown of Cleveland, Ohio. It was there that Yaakov went through the end of his treatment and passed away in 1999 at the age of 24.

Realistic Optimism

As difficult as it was, Shira needed to focus on raising the boys. The time constraints and the pressures of a single mother left time for little else. But she always had a bug inside of her. She wanted to fight cancer and help young cancer patients.

Since Yaakov had a rare form of a pediatric cancer, he was treated in a pediatric ward where the most qualified doctors for these forms of cancer work. “Yaakov was a big brother to a lot of the kids,” Shira told Aish.com. “He was an adult in a pediatric ward. He was very charismatic and he brought humor and light to a situation that was quite dreadful. He took on the responsibility of bringing optimism to the children.”

For that reason, Shira was inspired to write a book specifically for children battling cancer. Her efforts culminated in the publication of her creative graphic novel, Nistar.

The hero in Nistar, JJ, is based on Yaakov’s personality. The character is a doctor who overcame Ewing’s sarcoma, a childhood cancer.

The book is an inspiring graphic novel, crafted in comic book style to appeal to young readers. The idea of creating a graphic novel came to Shira a couple of years after Yaakov’s passing. She became an avid reader of serious comic books such as “Sandman” by Neil Gaiman and “It Was a Dark and Silly Night” by Art Spiegelman, and enlisted the artistic help of Josef Rubinstein, who has had a successful career illustrating for Marvel and DC Comics. Using this medium, Shira explored a deep and serious subject matter in a way that is appealing and comprehensible for children.

In the novel, a boy named Ben is diagnosed with cancer. A doctor, JJ, begins to tell him and the other children in the cancer ward a story about a superhero defeating evil demons, which Shira wrote drawing on the Kabbalstic story of the Zohar stone which, according to Jewish lore, is a prism that contains primordial light and has been passed down through generations since the creation of the world.

JJ tells Ben the story over the course of several days. Between JJ’s story telling sessions, he battles his own demons – the bad guys he is fighting are representative of the cancer he survived, which still comes back to haunt him at times.

We want to encourage children to keep on moving and to never give up.

Near the end of the book, JJ nearly accepts defeat – he almost accepts that Ben is going to die and that he cannot be saved. Shira says she purposefully included this in the story because the effort to help cancer patients must be careful to not give false hope. At that point in the book, while JJ is in despair over what he believes is the end of Ben’s life, he is encouraged by a character that plays the role of a guiding angel. She says to JJ: “Your magic tricks, your stories and your steadfast optimism…you have already accomplished much more with these children than you seem to realize.”

Shira wanted to convey that optimistic message to the children and the families of the children who may succumb to the disease. Shira explains: “There is a thin line between hope and false hope. On the one hand, we want to encourage children to use fantasy and creativity, to keep on moving, and to never give up. On the other hand, there is a point in time that acceptance is more important than hope. Continuing to hope becomes detrimental, and if you don’t accept death, the person ends up dying alone.”

She calls the approach “optimistic but realistic.” That’s the reason JJ almost accepts defeat. However, Shira says, “I couldn’t give the book a bad ending. Plus 80% of children today survive cancer which is a very positive statistic.” Therefore Shira believes the prioritization of acceptance over hope only applies to a minority of child patients.

Hope If You Dare

In addition to JJ’s background as Yaakov, the book is filled with insights, symbols, and stories that inspired Shira along the way. JJ’s heroic catchphrase in the book is “hope if you dare.” Shira began to take that dare a number of times – both during Yaakov’s treatment and after his passing.

The very first page of the book tells of a kabalistic parable of 36 righteous men “whose very existence prevents the world from collapsing into total darkness.” The concept in Kabballah is known as Tzadikim Nistarim. The concept was one that helped Shira get back up after Yaakov’s passing.

Shira enrolled in a weekly class at Siegel College of Jewish Studies in Cleveland, Ohio. She says that she was not ready for a full university degree at the time, so she just enrolled in a weekly class, which she would always look forward to. “It started as my entrance back in to studying,” Shira told Aish.com, “but it turned in to my entrance back to life.” Shira went on to expand her studies there and left with a BA in Jewish Studies.

”My goal is to give children hope and empower them.”

Her Jewish studies became her second inspiration to continue Yaakov’s fight against cancer. Shira cites one specific Jewish idea: “The concept of shattering vessels helped me get back up.” The idea is that shattered things can be put back together. Shira reflects: “When things break – and things do break – we have a chance to piece it back together. Not necessarily to recreate it the way it was before, but to create a new reality. Something that is original or different. I didn’t get back what I had before but I was able to create something different that allowed me to help other people and move forward.”

The book cannot bring Yaakov back but it is something new that Shira built from the pieces of her shattered past.

It was published and released in 2013. Shortly thereafter, Shira raised $25,000 to distribute 5000 copies of the book to children in oncology wards all over the United States. Her next project is to translate the book into Hebrew, and eventually other languages. Shira has already received interested enquiries from people in Kenya, Australia, New Zealand, Uruguay, and Brazil.

The book has won praise from professionals, including those who work with the target audience. “Discussing cancer with children is very difficult,” Prof. David Sidransky, an oncology specialist at Johns Hopkins University and Hospital explained. “This graphic novel is an innovative and exciting tool to help build hope for families affected.”

Shira has returned to Israel and she is busy running her clinic where she serves as an arts therapist for children with all diseases and disabilities. “Writing the comic book was empowering. It gave me the opportunity to express overwhelming emotions, to be angry – and to fight death. My goal is to give children hope and empower them.”

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About the Author

Eli Levine is the former managing director of Aish's Hasbara Fellowships, where he endeavored to advocate for Israel on college campuses. He is pursuing a master's degree at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem. Eli grew up in San Diego, California.

Visitor Comments: 8

(7)
Anonymous,
May 16, 2014 5:29 AM

What better place than Cleveland?

Perfect, to create such graphic art in Cleveland. In 1938, as the storm clouds of the Shoah rose over Europe, Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster created the comic book character Superman in Cleveland. These two young Jewish men incorporated a number of veiled Jewish references in their fighter for "truth, justice and the American way, a timely antithesis of the Nazi ideal. Kol hakovod to Shira Frimer for following in this tradition.

(6)
Mary,
May 12, 2014 10:58 PM

inspiration

Shira is tto be commended not only on her faith but on her service to others, especially children who are facing horrific illnesses. Many would turn away and try to forget what they had been through. She used her experience to help others. She is a blessing

(5)
malka,
May 12, 2014 9:23 PM

how inspiring. turning around your pain around for the benefit of others. may you go from strength to strength, helping such vulnerable children (and their parents) through such harrowing ordeals.

(4)
Chani,
May 12, 2014 8:00 PM

Planning other books?

My son-in-law was diagnosed with cancer just a few weeks ago. He and my daughter have 4 young children. A book like this for children of those figting cancer would be wonderful. Do you have any plans for other books?

(3)
Edward Kremer,
May 12, 2014 2:06 PM

Thank G-D she takes darkness to Light. Very Blessed

Thanks for the Inspirational Blessing of this Wonderful Daughterof G-D. May I suggest two books by Sara Yoheved Rigler.Holy Woman and G-D Winked.

(2)
Anonymous,
May 11, 2014 5:18 PM

I work at a hospital in Savannah GA, Could I have a copy sent to me here, so I may show the DRS. I'll pay for it. Please inform

Shira Frimer,
May 12, 2014 1:01 PM

Where to order:

The book can be ordered at the link below:http://www.nistarheroes.com/sample-page/

If you have any questions please email me:Shirafrimer@gmail.com

(1)
Miriam,
May 11, 2014 11:31 AM

Very inspiring story

how a woman takes her pain and loneliness and uses it together with her talents to creatively make a masterpiece to help terrified children. Wow. A very inspiring lesson for life. Thank you for sharing, Aish.

I just got married and have an important question: Can we eat rice on Passover? My wife grew up eating it, and I did not. Is this just a matter of family tradition?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

The Torah instructs a Jew not to eat (or even possess) chametz all seven days of Passover (Exodus 13:3). "Chametz" is defined as any of the five grains (wheat, spelt, barley, oats, and rye) that came into contact with water for more than 18 minutes. Chametz is a serious Torah prohibition, and for that reason we take extra protective measures on Passover to prevent any mistakes.

Hence the category of food called "kitniyot" (sometimes referred to generically as "legumes"). This includes rice, corn, soy beans, string beans, peas, lentils, peanuts, mustard, sesame seeds and poppy seeds. Even though kitniyot cannot technically become chametz, Ashkenazi Jews do not eat them on Passover. Why?

Products of kitniyot often appear like chametz products. For example, it can be hard to distinguish between rice flour (kitniyot) and wheat flour (chametz). Also, chametz grains may become inadvertently mixed together with kitniyot. Therefore, to prevent confusion, all kitniyot were prohibited.

In Jewish law, there is one important distinction between chametz and kitniyot. During Passover, it is forbidden to even have chametz in one's possession (hence the custom of "selling chametz"). Whereas it is permitted to own kitniyot during Passover and even to use it - not for eating - but for things like baby powder which contains cornstarch. Similarly, someone who is sick is allowed to take medicine containing kitniyot.

What about derivatives of kitniyot - e.g. corn oil, peanut oil, etc? This is a difference of opinion. Many will use kitniyot-based oils on Passover, while others are strict and only use olive or walnut oil.

Finally, there is one product called "quinoa" (pronounced "ken-wah" or "kin-o-ah") that is permitted on Passover even for Ashkenazim. Although it resembles a grain, it is technically a grass, and was never included in the prohibition against kitniyot. It is prepared like rice and has a very high protein content. (It's excellent in "cholent" stew!) In the United States and elsewhere, mainstream kosher supervision agencies certify it "Kosher for Passover" -- look for the label.

Interestingly, the Sefardi Jewish community does not have a prohibition against kitniyot. This creates the strange situation, for example, where one family could be eating rice on Passover - when their neighbors will not. So am I going to guess here that you are Ashkenazi and your wife is Sefardi. Am I right?

Yahrtzeit of Rabbi Moses ben Nachman (1194-1270), known as Nachmanides, and by the acronym of his name, Ramban. Born in Spain, he was a physician by trade, but was best-known for authoring brilliant commentaries on the Bible, Talmud, and philosophy. In 1263, King James of Spain authorized a disputation (religious debate) between Nachmanides and a Jewish convert to Christianity, Pablo Christiani. Nachmanides reluctantly agreed to take part, only after being assured by the king that he would have full freedom of expression. Nachmanides won the debate, which earned the king's respect and a prize of 300 gold coins. But this incensed the Church: Nachmanides was charged with blasphemy and he was forced to flee Spain. So at age 72, Nachmanides moved to Jerusalem. He was struck by the desolation in the Holy City -- there were so few Jews that he could not even find a minyan to pray. Nachmanides immediately set about rebuilding the Jewish community. The Ramban Synagogue stands today in Jerusalem's Old City, a living testimony to his efforts.

It's easy to be intimidated by mean people. See through their mask. Underneath is an insecure and unhappy person. They are alienated from others because they are alienated from themselves.

Have compassion for them. Not pity, not condemning, not fear, but compassion. Feel for their suffering. Identify with their core humanity. You might be able to influence them for the good. You might not. Either way your compassion frees you from their destructiveness. And if you would like to help them change, compassion gives you a chance to succeed.

It is the nature of a person to be influenced by his fellows and comrades (Rambam, Hil. De'os 6:1).

We can never escape the influence of our environment. Our life-style impacts upon us and, as if by osmosis, penetrates our skin and becomes part of us.

Our environment today is thoroughly computerized. Computer intelligence is no longer a science-fiction fantasy, but an everyday occurrence. Some computers can even carry out complete interviews. The computer asks questions, receives answers, interprets these answers, and uses its newly acquired information to ask new questions.

Still, while computers may be able to think, they cannot feel. The uniqueness of human beings is therefore no longer in their intellect, but in their emotions.

We must be extremely careful not to allow ourselves to become human computers that are devoid of feelings. Our culture is in danger of losing this essential aspect of humanity, remaining only with intellect. Because we communicate so much with unfeeling computers, we are in danger of becoming disconnected from our own feelings and oblivious to the feelings of others.

As we check in at our jobs, and the computer on our desk greets us with, "Good morning, Mr. Smith. Today is Wednesday, and here is the agenda for today," let us remember that this machine may indeed be brilliant, but it cannot laugh or cry. It cannot be happy if we succeed, or sad if we fail.

Today I shall...

try to remain a human being in every way - by keeping in touch with my own feelings and being sensitive to the feelings of others.

With stories and insights,
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