Saturday, October 24, 2009

Temptation

I am home alone. Well, not really. The Hubster went to play hockey for the first time this season and Big Sister is hanging with her mom. Little Sister is in bed, so I have the place to myself.

This is a dangerous, dangerous time for me. I am not hungry. I had plenty to eat today…a smallish breakfast because I had Turbo and Pump this morning—I absolutely cannot kick it on a full stomach—followed by a protein-filled lunch consisting of an egg and ham sandwich with some fruit…nuts and granola later for a snack…and a good-sized fillet of grilled salmon with a double helping of broccoli for dinner. I am not hungry.

But I am starving. I want to eat. I want to make brownies or cookies and eat the whole pan before they have a chance to cool. I want to shred up some cheese and make quesadillas. I want to make dip and eat all of the little bags of chips we bought for the girls’ lunches. I want to investigate my fridge and eat everything I can find.

But I don’t. I have to weigh in tomorrow morning, and while I haven’t been tracking this week, I am feeling pretty good about where I’m at. I hate it when I have a good week and ruin it the night before my meeting by eating something too salty or too heavy. I like Weight Watchers and I can honestly say that having this accountability is really helping me, but only being able to count my weight once a week is hard…it really can be thrown off by a poorly planned meal or two.

I shouldn’t be thinking about it. I should get up and do something productive…or, better yet, go to bed and get some real sleep and then wake up tomorrow refreshed and ready for breakfast to go. I should NOT keep sitting here, thinking about food I want, food I shouldn’t have, feeling sorry for myself and dreaming about the cheeseburger I’m having for dinner tomorrow.