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(For this thought exercise, let’s focus on table-service waitstaff.

Bartenders would require a separate set of equations, which I’ll do later if I don’t get flamed into the next dimension for even suggesting this.) Servers generally make a base salary of $2.13 an hour, or somewhere thereabouts.

It’s a bare minimum to keep the folks at the Labor Board and the IRS happy. On a six-hour shift, let’s say our hypothetical server – we’ll call her Lydia – at our hypothetical restaurant – we’ll call it Devin’s Grill – had a total of 30 customers, across eighteen tables.

(It’s a slow day at Devin’s.) This would be a typical American-fare restaurant, where the standard entree is $8.00.

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Alistair Leiper pleaded guilty to four child sex crimes after police raided his home in Streatham, south London.