That's Right, I'm A Chef!

The blog of Ben Storkamp. Alleged chef, part-time diehard Twins fan, full time television connoisseur.
Known authority on Freshy Freshington, Harold Dieterle and Hells Kitchen.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Hells Kitchen Recap- Episode Four

-First up, maybe I'm being a hypocrite since I so freely ripped the Twins earlier this year but how damn fun is this team to watch now? A lot, thats how much. Seriously, everything on this team is firing right now and it's just a ball to watch. Sadly the Tigers and White Sox are just as hot so the Twins are still 11 games out after winning 15 of 16. Sigh. Thats what you get when the two teams ahead of you are both on pace to win 263 games this year.

-Here we go.

Giacomo is gone. I blame the girlish hair. As always everyone falls back to the dorms. Tom is pissed about being put up for elimination by the members of his team. He goes on about how much he's given up to be here. Apparently this is his fourth career. Rachel and Heather get righteously pissed off by his nonsense. They're cooks through and through and let him know. I feel ya.

Next morning at lineup Chef singles out Heather, Sara and Rachel as leaders. Virginia is less than thrilled with this. Chef is disappointed with the mens directionless work so far so he yoinks Heather from the Reds and settles her with the guys. She is then the one who is less than thrilled.

Field trip time. They're going to one of LAs most succesful restaurants. Is it Spago? No, its Pinks, a hot dog place. Which happens to feature a Gordon Ramsey Dog. Virginia doesn't order it but does remark that its probably hot and spicy just like he is. Man it was one thing last year when Chef was clearly kind of fond of Elsie, its a little different when Virginia is practically throwing herself at him.

Tom mentions working at a hot dog stand at as a kid. He is pressed into service to make an order and does so without sweating on it. After everyone has eaten their size-of-a-grown mans forearm hotdogs Chef orders them to hustle back to the kitchen as they will be opening for lunch. They do so, sans Keith who sort of, ambles his way back. Because thats how K-Grease rolls. Really, K-Grease.

The teams have just two hours to learn and prep a simplified menu. Pizza, pasta formaggio (heh) chopped steak and Caesar salad. Right before service Chef pep talks them about how lunch is all about speed. The doors open and a horde of screaming urchins pour in. Shit, lame. Tom looks like he wants to cry.

Things start out very well for everyone. Sara drops a box of plastic wrap slashing her finger on the razor. Yeah, I've done that. Tom and Garret bicker over Caesar salad drawing a stiff rebuke from Awesome Team Leader Heather. Back in Blue Kitchen Sara gets all "Give me my space!" when her team mates try to help her. I feel ya. The kids cause havoc out in the dining room as the two teams start firing their food out. A little graphic shows the tickets remaining for each team. They both clear their last tickets at about the same time. Well, its a completed service I guess. Lets see how dinner goes.

The damned kids rated the food on a 1-10 scale. The blue team scored 9.84. Guess they're easy to please. Ah, but red team scores...9.85! Heh. Thats one of those reality TV "well, maybe" moments but its still kinda funny. Blue team finally wins one. Reward: A day at an amusement park. Meh. Garret and Heather sit next to each other on the roller coaster so I guess they're cool. She's probably secretly turned on by his caveman behaviour. Various boardwalk games are partaken of and Tom does well at them.The punishment: Clean the trashed dining room. Sara goofs off a bunch drawing Rachels ire. Eventually their sniping leads Sous Chef Mary Ann to spike a cake on the just cleaned carpet. Cool. Rachel says Sara is a bitch. Sara seems amused.

Prep time, and its all akward for the Reds. Pre-service Chef informs them that the ice machine is broken, so as their additional punishment someone will have to fetch ice when needed.

Rachel and Sara get into trouble right away as the service starts. Sara claims she didn't hear Rachels three calls for scallops. Drama! Garrets first apps are turned away at the hot plate. Chef orders him to taste his food before sending it out. Rachels first attempts flop too. Her risotto is too stiff. Garrett nails his next try but Rachels second attempt is too runny. Oops.

More crap in the red kitchen as Sara throws Virginia under the bus this time. She claims Virginia never called for a needed turbot. Chef bitches out Virginia hardcore over this while Sara laughs it up. Wow. I don't know what just happened there. Is Sara really this evil? Apparently she is as she privately fesses up to sabotaging Virginia.

On blue side Tom has started on the entrees. And he repeatedly drops the ball. I don't like his chances here. Virginia and Rachel send up some quail with the wings still on further infuriating Chef. He's so pissed he sends Rachel for ice. Blue team makes him no happier as Tom is making the wrong order. This prompts a fist slamming on the metal counter that draws the attention of everyone in the restaurant. I think he's mad now. One of Toms pans catches fire and Chef gives up and puts Keith on the meat station and tells Tom to just stand there and watch. Oooh. Thats vicious.

Virginia sends up a too-rare Wellington and everything falls apart. Not only are they using an improper egg wash, they're actually out of Wellingtons now. This is too much for Chef who hurls his apron in Toms face and orders a shutdown. Man, he is freakin' livid. He sends everyone back to the dorms and in lieu of naming a winner just tells each team to nominate someone for elimination.

Virigina confronts Sara about the previous incident. Sara is all comforting then interviews about how sneaky she is. Garrett Keith and Heather need no time figuring out who to eliminate. Tom obviously. Tom sits by himself musing about how luck Chef is that Tom didn't drop him for the apron thing. Riiiight.

At lienup Keith puts Toms name up as their nominee. Sara says that they have settled on Virginia. In the cruelest thing ever Chef is like "Did you consider Rachel?" Ouch. Ouch. Whatever, Tom is sooo toast. And indeed he is exiled from Hells Kitchen. Despite previously threatening to punch him, Tom shakes Chefs hand after handing over his jacket. On the way out he interviews that maybe Chef will give him a recommandation. Meanwhile Chef wonders what compelled Tom to become a chef as he is a total crap cook. So probably not.