Top Online Dating Tips

Hi, my name is Russ Ruggles, and I have been meeting women online for well over a decade.
Along the way, I developed a methodology through which you can clearly present the interesting you, and
secure a date online. more »

It’s tough to talk about ourselves. If you’re trying to do so in order to get a date, you’re probably even more on-edge. If you are too critical, you’ll seem like an undesirable person. However, if you’re too cocky, you’ll seem like George W. Bush being unable to think of a big mistake in his presidency.

Yet there’s an eHarmony profile question that basically requires you to engage in this delicate balancing act. As part of your profile, you’ll have to come up with an interesting answer to the question, “What is one thing that people don’t notice about you right away that you wish they would?”

Think Job Interview…But More Interesting

You need to think about your answer to this question in the same way you’d answer that old job interview standby, “What’s your greatest weakness?” In that question, you need to present your flaw in a positive light. The same is true with your profile answer. One of the best pieces of eHarmony profile advice is that a little thought really helps you get positive responses.

The Big Issues

While you can always opt out of this question or use our Match.com vs. eHarmony comparison to see if another service might be useful, it’s better to show that you can answer a tough question when necessary. You might even want to use some eHarmony promo codes to open a few accounts in order to see which answers work best for you.

Be Funny!

One of the easiest ways into a woman’s heart is by making her laugh. Your answer to this question on your profile can be a great way to make this happen. Here are a couple of suggestions for what to put in your profile if you want to make her smile.

Mention a ridiculous part of your body. It’s pretty common for women to list some feature on their bodies in answer to this question. By mentioning s in a similar fashion, you’ll probably make her laugh.

Create some kind of character trait that is completely outrageous. You might say, for instance, that people don’t typically notice the fact that you are a wizard. Even if you aren’t actually a wizard (and no, you aren’t) it can spark a great conversation.

Be Honest

Being straightforward and honest is always a good tactic in the dating world. The same goes for answering this question. If you’re not naturally funny, don’t force it. Instead, try some of these ideas:

Contrast your answer to your profile photographs. If your pictures are all of you striking masculine poses, soften things up by saying that people often don’t notice how gentle you can be.

It can be very impressive to mention that you wish people would notice all of the quiet charity work that you do. Showing that you look for ways to help others is always an attractive feature.

The questions you have to answer on your profile will be mentioned in every single eHarmony review. They might seem a little strange at first, but you should take every one of profile questions as an opportunity to explain why you are the perfect romantic partner. Whether you’re joking or taking the question seriously, being able to consider yourself critically will always increase your chances at a date.

Here are some posts I’ve written about some specific eHarmony questions that are tough to answer. There’s some sample answers to give you ideas for your profile:

The most important eHarmony profile advice you will ever receive is to make your profile as interesting as you are. How do you apply this advice to your profile? Well, the questions that might elicit boring/typical answers, like “How do you typically spend your leisure time?” are actually an opportunity to let your personality shine.

Here’s the golden rule: Be honest and detailed…but leave out boring information.

Chances are you don’t spend most of your leisure time taking long walks on the beach. It’s a nice idea and definitely romantic (if a little clichéd) but it doesn’t tell potential dates anything about you. Be honest about how you actually spend your time! Do you love TV? Great! Mention your favorite TV show, but don’t talk about how you often spend days binge watching episodes on Netflix. It may be true, but that information definitely falls into the boring category.

You want to be as specific as possible when answering this question. In other words, include all the little (interesting) details. If you love hiking, talk about your favorite trails. If you’re answers are more typical, like spending time with friends, be specific about the nights you spend enjoying wine over a home-cooked meal. If you’re the one who cooks them, be sure to mention your love of finding new recipes.

How you typically spend your leisure time is also a great indicator of what you and potential matches could do on your dates. You could even mention activities you’d like to spend more time doing, but you’re certain they’d be more enjoyable with a partner.

If you have explored online dating sites, you know that when comparing Match vs eHarmony, eHarmony is much more marriage-minded. That’s why the leisure question is on eHarmony and not required on a Match.com profile. In my eHarmony review, I pointed out that eHarmony is very serious about matching people up for long-term, successful relationships.

If a committed relationship is your goal, you’re definitely on the right online dating site and you don’t want to overlook the importance of answering the questions designed to reveal your personality. If you’re ready to start filling out your eHarmony profile, grab one of my eHarmony coupons.

Here are some other posts I’ve written about some specific eHarmony questions that are tough to answer. There’s some sample answers to give you ideas for your profile:

Any eHarmony review you read online will discuss the strange questions that you’ll have to answer when filling out your profile. In the midst of all these odd details about yourself that will supposedly make a woman more interested in you, there’s one question that actually seems straightforward.

“Other than appearance, what is the first thing that people notice about you?”

It’s important to realize that the question is deceptively straightforward. In truth, you have to figure out a way to answer the question so that the person reading your profile feels involved, too. Most people using an online dating site will try to focus their profiles only on themselves. Obviously there’s a good bit of self-promotion involved in filling out your profile, but that doesn’t mean you should talk yourself up at the exclusion of all others.

If there’s one piece of eHarmony profile advice you should be taking away from this post, it that you need to treat your profile as if it’s a job application. Actually, this will be true of any online dating site you use (see our Match.com vs. eHarmony post to see why). You shouldn’t be selling yourself so much as you should be trying to sell the other person on why you will make her life better.

It’s All About Empathy

It can be a little confusing to think about your online dating profile as being inclusive of the women you’re trying to attract. Still, you need to realize that empathy is one of the most attractive features that women look for in men. Even the eHarmony question seems to have a built-in empathy component; after all, it’s asking what other people notice about you.

Write From Her Perspective

The best way to make a woman notice your eHarmony profile is to pull her in with the way you describe yourself. Rather than sticking to simple, rote answers (“My sense of humor”), find out how to write the same thing in a more empathic way. Here are some examples:

“The first thing people notice about me is how much they laugh when we’re hanging out.”

“People tend to notice that they feel a lot happier when they’re around me for a while.”

Both of these responses, while conveying the same information as “My sense of humor,” are able to make a woman think she’ll really enjoy spending time with you. Basically, an empathic answer to this profile question will plant the idea of enjoying your company before you’ve even asked her out! This gives you a huge advantage when it comes to actually talking with her. A man who already exists in her imagination stands a better chance of getting to meet her in real life.

Using a few eHarmony promo codes can make it easier to try these methods out for yourself. Come up with a couple of different answers that you think might seem attractive and empathic. Then be sure to take note of which ones actually get the best responses.

Here are some posts I’ve written about some specific eHarmony questions that are tough to answer. There’s some sample answers to give you ideas for your profile:

When it comes to answering questions on an eHarmony profile, there’s no question that people more get thrown off by than, “What are 5 things you can’t live without?” It seems like one of the easiest questions on the entire list. I mean, who can’t create a desert island list that makes them seem interesting?

Well, as simple as you might think this question is, the truth is that there’s quite a bit more to the question than you might think. Within these five things about you, there is an opportunity to make a huge impact on the person reading your profile. The trick is to use your answers to really stand out from every other guy looking for a date.

Don’t Waste Your Space or Her Time

If you’re read some of our other eHarmony profile advice, you know that you need to answer your questions in a way that sends out the information you want without being boring. You know you don’t spend much time reading girls’ posts, so what makes you think they’re going to spend much time reading yours? You need all of your answers to say multiple things about you at once. This includes some stuff on the surface and some stuff she won’t even pick up on consciously; basically, your writing style is going to say as much as the answers themselves.

Answering the Question

Obviously, you’re going to want to talk about some of the things in life you are most passionate about. After all, this is going to tell someone a lot about you. A couple of things guys have found success with include:

interesting hobbies (especially ones that can be done with a partner)

an exciting career

your favorite food (if it’s something more unique than pizza)

Don’t spend all your time talking about your surface-level interests, though. Also include a couple things that leave room for interpretation. She’s going to be much more interested in you if you can’t live without certain character traits that make you seem like a good partner. Love, generosity, and excitement are all traits that can attract a potential date.

Be Unique: Try Some Effort

We’ve talked a bit about what to put in your profile, but it can be just as useful to know what not to include. One thing to never put in your profile answer is a list of the basic human needs. Everyone on Earth needs food, water, and air. This doesn’t make you seem unique; it just takes up valuable space you could use to actually sell yourself.

It never fails that about every fifth profile you come across will try this kind of approach in an attempt to seem above the question. Guess what: if you’re trying to get a date, you aren’t above using a little creativity and effort in your answers.

Avoid Cliches

Cliches are going to be the death knell of your eHarmony profile. They are the surest ways to make women cringe. If you’re not sure what seems like a cliche, grab a few eHarmony promotional codes to start researching other people’s profiles. Just a few minutes spent doing this per day can help you figure out which answers show up again and again. Do you really think you’ll stand out for being unable to live without coffee or a cell phone?

There’s a lot of debate as to which online dating service to use (see our comparison of Match.com vs. eHarmony). What doesn’t need any debate is that you’ve got limited space to make an impression, and you’re going up against every other guy on the site. To learn more, check out our eHarmony review to see how to improve your profile even more.

Here are some posts I’ve written about some specific eHarmony questions that are tough to answer. There’s some sample answers to give you ideas for your profile:

If you’re familiar with eHarmony at all, you have encountered this question before. (If you haven’t signed up for eHarmony yet, check out my eHarmony review. ) The “What are you most passionate about?” question is the online dating profile version of the “What do you for fun?” question we all get asked at parties.