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And Here’s Another Thing

So I did all this research last week looking at cats and kittens and was determined to go out and get one this very weekend. Friday evening actually. Someone from the SPCA returned my call on Friday morning and told me they had over 160 cats up for adoption. A staggering figure. And I figured out of that crowd of kitties, there was bound to be at least one to catch my eye. But then I chickened out. Why? Because my landlady helped with some errands on Friday afternoon. They had agreed to pay for the new safer towel bars so we went to a hardware mega-store to pick them out and then she helped me bring this antique Indian table I have to a glass-cuter so they could cut the glass tabletop to measure. They called back after a couple of hours and said it was ready, even though they had originally said it would be ready next week, because apparently they got nervous about keeping an antique around. Which means that my landlady helped me again as did her husband when he got home, carried the table and glass top here.

All this to say that I spent a substantial amount of one-on-one with her on Friday and that combined with all the help, I felt guilty about planning to do this adoption behind her back. The first thing she said when she came up to my place was that my entrance smells of cat pee. Fritz had peed there a few years ago, but I’d used all kinds of product on it and thought the problem was solved. In any case, I took that as a cue to start introducing the idea of another cat, so I said “I know you were resistant to me having a cat at first but after five years now, does Fritz cause any problems for you?” I know he doesn’t so I wanted to bring up the second cat idea as also being no trouble. But she said they’d noticed their back yard reeks of cat pee lately and weren’t sure to what extent Fritz was responsible for that, and I, a bit stung, said of course it couldn’t just be Fritz! There are dozens of cats walking around our street and alleyway here. She agreed with me, but that took all the wind out of my sails. Because I figured they’d object to a second cat on the grounds that it would be another source of cat pee. And as much as I’d like to make a guarantee that my second cat wouldn’t go outdoors, or if it does, that it won’t ever pee in their yard specifically, I can’t make that promise. After they’d driven off to their weekend getaway I still thought I should go to the SPCA anyway but at that point I was so tired and emotionally drained that I decided it wasn’t a good state for me to go to an animal shelter considering I always end up bawling my eyes out whenever I go there and also that it was a guarantee that if I went, I’d leave with a cat.

I figured it’s like this: either I just go get the cat or kitten, and then deal with it when they see it in which case I’d probably say “a friend” had to find homes for a whole litter and “begged” me to take that kitten or she would have ended up at the SPCA. That would work except for the fact that living with the guilt of this lie would be unbearable. Which then brings me back to the option of discussing it with my landlords beforehand in hopes of them giving me their blessing, though they can all too easily say no, which would then kill all my chances of having another cat because there is no way I would then go behind their backs once they’d voiced their objections. In other words, I’m fairly certain they won’t allow it if I ask, so the question is basically whether I lie to them before or after the fact.