Are you happy with your body?

I've spent my life trying to be skinny. I wasn't bothered about being healthy, I just wanted to be as thin as possible. So fad diet after fad diet, low carb, Atkins, 5:2, slimming world, caveman ... constantly feeling shit and unhappy even though I've always been within a healthy BMI - I just wasn't skinny enough.

Recently, within the past year I have grown an interest in fitness and have started taking part in fun runs (colour run, inflatable 5k, Halloween run etc). I've also gone back to martial arts and was shocked at how weak I was. I joined the gym and started building up my cardio abilities and muscle mass. At this point I realised i needed to eat properly in order to do these things. Ironically, I have now lost weight and am finally happy with my weight.

Now I strive for lean and healthy rather than thin.

AIBU to think there is far too much emphasis on "losing weight" and not enough on actually exercising? If everyone exercised appropriately, the food wouldn't be such an issue?

Slimming world is the absolute pits but they, along with NHS etc all lay emphasis on simply "losing weight". Shouldn't the emphasis be on "improving health"?

I feel the same as you OP. I am overweight, but I've spent a lot of time making peace with my body and now I can say I am happy most of the time.

Last year I took up and completed couch to 5K and have been lifting weights at the gym, and while I don't think I'm any thinner I've loved teaching my body to do something new and finding that it's there for me. I also feel attractive - I have learned what I like for hair and makeup and clothes that suit me.

Now I mostly see my body as a friend. It might not be one that others would lust over but it has served me well and carried me on amazing adventures. I feel like I owe it to my body to view it with appreciatoln and joy rather than misery and anger.

Yes I am. 5ft 4, size 8, 52kg. Small with bumps where they should be. I do need to get back in the gym though. I did minimal cardio, and concentrated on weights. I play tennis and badminton and I walk a lot. I'm 45. But oh dear.....the face, that's another story!

I’m not entirely happy with it but am more accepting of my body than I used to be. I’m a healthy weight for my height and am mainly in proportion. Of course I’d love to be thinner (spent my whole adult life saying that, even when I was quite thin!) but for now I’m trying to focus on getting regular exercise and eating right, more to improve my mood and health rather than for my appearance. There’s bugger all 2 hours of gym a day are going to do about the saggy skin on my stomach or the stretch marks my darling children gifted me with.

Not from an aesthetic point of view (size 12, bit flabby round the edges, increasing bingo wings as I approach 40 etc). BUT I'm happy that I'm fit and healthy with no health issues (touch wood) and can do fun things with my girls, and that matters more at my age than looking good :-)

I know I could improve how I look with a better diet. But we love going for meals out with the kids and sharing a takeaway and life's too short to not do things you enjoy.

No, I’m the biggest I’ve ever been and have just had an epiphany about how much I loathe myself so have been on a diet since the new year. It’s going well, I’m losing weight and I don’t hate it so much that I’m going to throw the towel in soon. I needed the wake up call and I got it when I stepped on the scales for the first time in a couple of years. I was genuinely shocked.

I agree with you about more exercise. The mental benefits of increasing exercise are another positive. In summer I play netball, run, swim and generally work out a lot more. In winter here it can be as cold as -40 and I find it really difficult to get motivated, but then I find everything crashing off course. So I eat less well, don't move as much, feel much less positive.

An emphasis on lean and healthy would be much more positive in my opinion.

I am finally happy. I am probably about 2 stone overweight (I am also very tall, so wear it well). I am sick to death of dieting; it's damaging and soul destroying, so I've largely given up on that, eat a balanced diet, and move when possible.I need more exercise, for sure...I'm in my 40's, and want to be stronger and more flexible, but I will no longer work on losing weight.

I am smart, loved, a great friend. My children adore me, my husband and I adore each other. My work is rewarding and challenging, and my social life is busy and fun. My body is the vessel carries me through all of that beautiful stuff, so I'm sure as hell grateful for that!

I am. I've been between an 8 and a 12 over the past 6 years, and am currently sitting at a 10, at 5'8". I'm going to sound so smug now, and I don't mean to, but I do have a good figure; big arse, biggish boobs and a small waist. But I think the reason I like my body is because of what it's capable of, or rather capable of overcoming. I have hEDS which is a real struggle, my mobility can be a problem and I suffer with dislocations regularly, yet my body, eventually, always carries on, despite everything. I exercise when I can and eat right and just try to look after my body as best I can, but really I think genetically I'm reasonably lucky.

Not now. I've really lost 'fitness' in the last 7 years or so and now have a lot of fat and flab where I wish I didn't have it. I know it's due to change in quite a few things in my life at an age when the weight piles on even if I'd not moved to a more sedentary life (so the combination of two has been dire).However, whatever the number in on the bathroom scales says doesn't bother me, it is the fact I can no longer fit into very much in my wardrobe, and the fact I can't get up without leaning on something when I kneel down, nor bend and ties shoelaces easily, and I make a creaking noise when I get up, etc. So, no, 'weight' doesn't bother me, but carrying fat / flab does bother me, even though I know change is in my own hands.

Not really. I'm about half a stone over maximum BMI and in photos I feel I look like a doughnut with little currants for eyes. I don't know how I look so large because I'm not that overweight. I also do quite a lot of exercise.

However I was never that happy with my body even when I weighed1st 7lb less than I do now, so I guess I do have a bit more perspective now I'm older. Also as a middle aged woman, I'm invisible to most, so a few pounds here or there shouldn't make much of a difference.

I find it hard on threads where people who have never been overweight, judge others for being so. I hate the implication that because I'm a bit over my ideal size that means I'm lazy and greedy and if only I stopped being those things I could be a size 10.

Yes overall and a little no. I put on weight due to having a broken ankle and sitting round and boredom eating. I'm back in the gym and eating healthy and losing weight, I've still some to go, but I'm happy it's going the right way.

My basic shape is quite good, I'm five eight, but have weirdly long legs and a short body. I've decent sized breasts at a d. I tend to put weight on round my middle and to be rather boyish hips down and have no waist.

So I'm not happy that I'm currently bigger than I'd rather be, but I'm happy with my body overall and no matter what size, pretty much always have been. When I want to lose weight, I tend to just get on and do it and maintain for a long time.

I agree the gym is a large part of the answer. There is a big difference to being simply thin than being fit/toned,

I’m happy with my body in so much as it gets me from A to B without particular difficulty, allows me to be completely autonomous and (as far as I know) functions pretty much as it should overall.

I’m also a couple of stones heavier than I should be, but that’s my own fault for eating too many carbs. I also have arthritis in my neck and spine, a very dodgy back due to disc problems which have caused nerve damage, and my skin is starting to sag. But hey, I’m nearly 60 and glad I’m still here and independent - I know too many people my age and younger who aren’t.

I really don’t care that there are slimmer/younger/prettier women around. Comparison is the thief of joy!