Masuta: "You will never be able to win!" *Masuta is a man who always wears black. his skin is pain, but he is not a vampire. he is the Demon King. he is madly in love with a human girl who is not really human. her name is Tria.*

Namida: "I won't let you!" *Namida is an angel who is also in love with Tria. he usually wears blue. he looks depressed because he knows the truth about both Masuta and Tria. his job is to protect Tria no matter what.*

Tria: "Stop this! Leave this town alone, Masuta!" *Tria is a Demon Hunter. she is able to use magic, ut she has hidden it from Masuta. she is in love with Masuta, but has some feelings for Namida. she wishes they could all get along. she can not go against her duty and must kill Masuta.*

Masuta: *looks at Tria then at Namida* "It seems the party has been interrupted. Let us continue somewhere else." *there was a flash of purple light as Masuta and Namida were sucked into a different world.*

(there fight will continue as Tria must find the 13 Powers of Giza, which are people that are very powerful and have different powers.)

Hi Yuki-kyo-kira, sorry about this but Im going to have to say no. We dont have this style of story writing in the group. Maybe if you adapt your style to suit our stories we'll gladly take you in CAS=).

How about this?

Spoiler Alert! Click to show or hide

This story starts in a little village. It was on the verge of being destroyed by the king of Telhomu. Compared to Telhomu, Sakeuno is tiny. We don’t have an army. Our village has very few males. They were taken away by the king. I sometimes wish I was stronger, but being a girl is not very helpful. I may not be able to do anything but my brother should be able to. Or so I thought.
It was my brother’s sixteenth birthday, the day he becomes a man. He will join the few men we have in the protecting of our village. I hope he will become a fine warrior, just like father. My father is the leader of our village. He will be picking Tetsuya’s bride. I hope Hanna will be the one to marry my brother. She is they prettiest woman in our village, but it probably won’t happen. She is the daughter of Bayphil, my father’s rival in the village. Even though Hanna and I are best friends, our fathers still fight. I hope their fight will end soon. I wish for many things, but my greatest wish is that this night never happened. This was the worst day ever.
It started around midday when Hanna and I were at the river. We were bathing like we usually do. Then Hanna saw something. And we started hearing noises.
“What was that?” Hanna said.
“I don’t know,” I said. There was a noise in the bushes and Hanna screamed. Out of the bushes came a man I did not know.
“S-sorry. I-I was just passing through,” he said. BAM! A rock hit him in the head. I looked at Hanna.
“You damn well better be sorry,” she shouted. “And how dear you peep at us.”
“I wasn’t. I swear,” he said. Hanna was about to throw another rock when I said, “Hanna, forgive the man. Just go back to the village.” And she did.
“So, your the leader,” the man said sneaking up behind me. Before I could react he grabbed me from behind. “But your breasts are smaller than hers.”
“Let go!” I said hitting him.
“Ow! You have one mean hit.”
“Get away from me.”
“Hmm. Come with me.”
“What?”
“If you come with me I can give you anything you desire.”
“I desire you to go away.”
“How old are you?”
“ I-I’m thirteen today.”
“Oh, well I’m sixteen. I can get married. Come with me.”
“No!” I screamed walking away.
“You will make a perfect bride.
After meeting that mysterious man, I walked back to the village. That was when I realized we didn’t even know each other’s name. How can someone want to get married to a person they just met without asking for her name? He must have been drunk. I arrived at the village just in time for the party to start. I was dressed in a dress my mother sowed. My brother wore the traditional warrior outfit. I had never listened to my father pronounce a boy a man before, but listened for it was my brother’s coming of age ceremony. I didn’t under stand what my father said except the part about protecting our village. As the son of the leader my brother received the holey sword, Banki. As soon as he took the sword there was a scream.
“Help! The village is one fire.” I turned around and saw the village ablaze. Someone else shouted, “it’s the king’s army.” Several more people screamed. If it was the king’s army, we are most likely to be killed. As my father tried to get everyone together, a member of the army came through the smoke and ashes.
“Where is Tetsuya Yamato?” He shouted.
“I’m Tetsuya,” my brother said.
“You are hereby executed for attempt of murder against King;” the army man said drawing his sword. There were shouts of “no” and “that’s impossible”. I tried to stop the man, but my mother held me back. I couldn’t speak as my brother’s head left his body. Several more screams were heard.
“Silence!” Said a booming voice.
“My Prince,” the army man quivered. The man on the horse was dressed in gold. He was the prince of Telhomu.
“Be quiet, Silva,” the prince shouted. “Kill everyone in this village to show no one will get away with such treachery.”
“Yes my lord” said the man named Silva. There were several arrows hitting the villagers. Swords cut screaming people. It all happened in a matter of seconds. The entire village was gone and only a group of people was alive. My family was no where to be seen. I tried to go look for them, but Hanna’s mother stopped me. She was crying as she held me back. I could hear her mumbling, “First Tetsuya, then our leader and then Hanna. Now the village is gone.” She kept whispering this over and over until the king’s army was out of site and until I fell asleep.

Yuki-kyo, its better than the first, it truly is. but our group dosen't write in First person, i'm not expecting you to write another story or whatever, but maybe if you could take your current story and turn it in a third person format... if you don't quiet understand 3rd person I suppose you could Message me and I could help you with what 3rd Person really is

I think Yuki has potential =D, though Yuki IF you join you have to stick to the story line we have and might have to adapt your writing alot more to suit our story format. If you're cool with that, I think we can have you in =3

it was rainy night in a forest a young girl was walking along a path. when she heard a noise behind her, she turned around and yelled "who's there, come out." a man walked out and grinned at her. she glared at the man. the man laughed and said "looks like I found the young princess Hotaru". Hotaru frowns and got into a fighting stance. "well I won't let you take me back "said Hotaru. the man charged at her and she did a flip and then attacked him with a kick to his side. he winced and then sent a punch at her, she blocked it and kicked him in the stomach hard, knocking the breath out of him. while he tried to recover she did a hand stand and kicked out with her feet right at his head, sending him into a tree and knocking him out. she fliped back to her feet and smiled.

"will I had no idea that a princess could fight like that" said a young man who walked out behind a tree. Hotaru turned and looked at him and said "of course not, I learned in secert". the man laughed, while Hotaru stared at him trying to read him. the man shook his head and said "I mean you no harm Princess". Hotaru nodded and said "I am sure you don't". the man smiled and bowed and turned and left but stopped and said "I think we will meet again Princess". before Hotaru could say anything the man had disappeared from view.

To start... I think you need to lengethen some of your sentences, and maybe more punctuation? It's so... monotonous... otherwise, I think you're okay. Sorry that I had to delete you (I'm blaming Blitz's lack of procedure).

it was rainy night in a forest a young girl was walking along a path. when she heard a noise behind her, she turned around and yelled "who's there, come out." a man walked out and grinned at her. she glared at the man. the man laughed and said "looks like I found the young princess Hotaru". Hotaru frowns and got into a fighting stance. "well I won't let you take me back "said Hotaru. the man charged at her and she did a flip and then attacked him with a kick to his side. he winced and then sent a punch at her, she blocked it and kicked him in the stomach hard, knocking the breath out of him. while he tried to recover she did a hand stand and kicked out with her feet right at his head, sending him into a tree and knocking him out. she fliped back to her feet and smiled.

"will I had no idea that a princess could fight like that" said a young man who walked out behind a tree. Hotaru turned and looked at him and said "of course not, I learned in secert". the man laughed, while Hotaru stared at him trying to read him. the man shook his head and said "I mean you no harm Princess". Hotaru nodded and said "I am sure you don't". the man smiled and bowed and turned and left but stopped and said "I think we will meet again Princess". before Hotaru could say anything the man had disappeared from view.

The tree's spwn people! (Both of the guys appeared from behind tree's XD) um, its OK, the fight scene was, well thats not terribly important, im one of the only few who actually like writing fight scenes XD and there where a few typos, though I am not one to talk (you will figure out what I mean if you end up joning the group XD) as for more punctuation, yea maybe add some more flavor to it, like the princess or the guy who saw her fight, neither of them seemed to be surprised at all.
Over all, I liked it, it was good and after writing for a bit in CAS I think you should fit in rather well.

To start... I think you need to lengethen some of your sentences, and maybe more punctuation? It's so... monotonous... otherwise, I think you're okay. Sorry that I had to delete you (I'm blaming Blitz's lack of procedure).

yea, I think it's good, I try to write more when i can think of what to write, that just popped into my head so i wrote it.

The tree's spwn people! (Both of the guys appeared from behind tree's XD) um, its OK, the fight scene was, well thats not terribly important, im one of the only few who actually like writing fight scenes XD and there where a few typos, though I am not one to talk (you will figure out what I mean if you end up joning the group XD) as for more punctuation, yea maybe add some more flavor to it, like the princess or the guy who saw her fight, neither of them seemed to be surprised at all.
Over all, I liked it, it was good and after writing for a bit in CAS I think you should fit in rather well.

lol, I am not good with fighting,lol. I am working on details and stuff, i am an okay speller.

To start... I think you need to lengethen some of your sentences, and maybe more punctuation? It's so... monotonous... otherwise, I think you're okay. Sorry that I had to delete you (I'm blaming Blitz's lack of procedure).

yea, I think it's good, I try to write more when i can think of what to write, that just popped into my head so i wrote it.

I think you'll adapt and improve, but I think you should also describe your characters more. Can I ask you to do a little editing, repost it, and describe the surrounding more, and emotions and looks. Like 'he raised a dark hand to parry the blow' or something. Just little details can make it so much better.

To start... I think you need to lengethen some of your sentences, and maybe more punctuation? It's so... monotonous... otherwise, I think you're okay. Sorry that I had to delete you (I'm blaming Blitz's lack of procedure).

yea, I think it's good, I try to write more when i can think of what to write, that just popped into my head so i wrote it.

I think you'll adapt and improve, but I think you should also describe your characters more. Can I ask you to do a little editing, repost it, and describe the surrounding more, and emotions and looks. Like 'he raised a dark hand to parry the blow' or something. Just little details can make it so much better.

yea, i guess, I would have describe the girl but i am not sure what she looks like. so i couldn't write that much detail about her.

To start... I think you need to lengethen some of your sentences, and maybe more punctuation? It's so... monotonous... otherwise, I think you're okay. Sorry that I had to delete you (I'm blaming Blitz's lack of procedure).

yea, I think it's good, I try to write more when i can think of what to write, that just popped into my head so i wrote it.

I think you'll adapt and improve, but I think you should also describe your characters more. Can I ask you to do a little editing, repost it, and describe the surrounding more, and emotions and looks. Like 'he raised a dark hand to parry the blow' or something. Just little details can make it so much better.

yea, i guess, I would have describe the girl but i am not sure what she looks like. so i couldn't write that much detail about her.

Find a picture or something. In the group, you'll need to make a full profile. This doesn't have to be your character there; just make something up.

it was rainy night in a muggy forest a young girl with mid-long hair was walking along a path. when she heard a noise behind her, she turned around and yelled "who's there, come out." a man walked out and grinned at her. she glared at the man. the man laughed and said "looks like I found the young princess Hotaru". Hotaru frowns and got into a fighting stance. "well I won't let you take me back "said Hotaru. the man charged at her and she did a flip and then attacked him with her left foot to his side. he winced and then sent a punch at her, she blocked it with her hands and kicked him in the stomach hard, knocking the breath out of him. while he tried to recover she did a hand stand and kicked out with her feet right at his head, sending him into a tree and knocking him out. she fliped back to her feet and smiled.

"well I had no idea that a princess could fight like that" said a young man who walked out behind a tree with dark eyes staring at her. Hotaru turned and looked at him and said "of course not, I learned in secert". the man laughed, while Hotaru stared at him trying to read him. the man shook his head and said "I mean you no harm Princess". Hotaru nodded and said "I am sure you don't". the man smiled and bowed and turned to leave but stopped and said "I think we will meet again Princess". before Hotaru could say anything the man had disappeared from view.

yea its better, and Shadow, she already made an entire profile (When blitz invited her in to the group without discussion) anyways, I like this one more than the first, and like I said, I think the rough edges will eventually work them selves out when she joins the gorup, they did for me and a other writers

Potential writers, you need to write a fight scene, an introduction to your character (general traits) and a converstation (that should have actions scattered around).

In CAS, we don't just write with our own characters - it's not a role-play. It's a story where we all manipulate other people's characters and write with them, to make it more interesting.

Kimberlee stepped up, bringing one foot after the other, waiting to enter the double doors. The rain was bearing down on his shoulders, especially his shoulders. Bringing a hand up while the other was rested on the edge of his pocket, he pushed the doors open and stepped inside. Men and women from within the restuarant looked over back at him but he didn't mind it didn't bother him oen bit.
"Welcome." The bartender spoke once and thats all he expected him to say again. Quiet not as he trudged over to the counter, he dumped himself properly over onto a seat as the male beside him curled up his nose in disgust. Kimberlee ignored that too. The rain from inside sounded like drums and then his attention was taken. The group of germans on his left were begining. A hefty woman pigtails, blond luscious hair cureved around her body held the violin in her hands andbegan to play, signalling for her young daughters to start their little dance.
"Dang Gone Women." Kimberlee turned hish ead to the man at the end of the counter, the drunk had vie empty bottle hung on the side some tipped over but he majority musty and empty. His break could reach around and knock out a strong circus russian. A heavy drink slammed down in front of a slender woman on the other side of the counter.
"What would you like honey?" The bartender inquired. She pulled one leg from over the other, pulling the dominated over the dominator. And curled her lips into a smile.
"I came looking for a hot mess little boy... you seen him?" Her thin little fingers reached into her pockets and placed a nice old picture up on the table. The bartender finished cleaning the jug, and leaned down to have look and the moment he looked down... Her hand gripped onto a short knife and ripped it out of its sheath, stabbing it into the back of his neck. A brawl broke out, music stopped tables and chairs fell over and she was the main target. But none of them stood a chance against her nagasaki skills...

Potential writers, you need to write a fight scene, an introduction to your character (general traits) and a converstation (that should have actions scattered around).

In CAS, we don't just write with our own characters - it's not a role-play. It's a story where we all manipulate other people's characters and write with them, to make it more interesting.

Kimberlee stepped up, bringing one foot after the other, waiting to enter the double doors. The rain was bearing down on his shoulders, especially his shoulders. Bringing a hand up while the other was rested on the edge of his pocket, he pushed the doors open and stepped inside. Men and women from within the restuarant looked over back at him but he didn't mind it didn't bother him oen bit.
"Welcome." The bartender spoke once and thats all he expected him to say again. Quiet not as he trudged over to the counter, he dumped himself properly over onto a seat as the male beside him curled up his nose in disgust. Kimberlee ignored that too. The rain from inside sounded like drums and then his attention was taken. The group of germans on his left were begining. A hefty woman pigtails, blond luscious hair cureved around her body held the violin in her hands andbegan to play, signalling for her young daughters to start their little dance.
"Dang Gone Women." Kimberlee turned hish ead to the man at the end of the counter, the drunk had vie empty bottle hung on the side some tipped over but he majority musty and empty. His break could reach around and knock out a strong circus russian. A heavy drink slammed down in front of a slender woman on the other side of the counter.
"What would you like honey?" The bartender inquired. She pulled one leg from over the other, pulling the dominated over the dominator. And curled her lips into a smile.
"I came looking for a hot mess little boy... you seen him?" Her thin little fingers reached into her pockets and placed a nice old picture up on the table. The bartender finished cleaning the jug, and leaned down to have look and the moment he looked down... Her hand gripped onto a short knife and ripped it out of its sheath, stabbing it into the back of his neck. A brawl broke out, music stopped tables and chairs fell over and she was the main target. But none of them stood a chance against her nagasaki skills...

Im kind of confused as to what happened, but im sure I just didn't read it close enough...
Um this is? what time period? ours is fantasy and also um, we don't have Germans or Russians, im sure you where just writing whatever for the application process but yea XD just wondering IF you know that