Wednesday, January 14, 2009

WNW: Banish the Paranoia, Literally.

This week's Word Nerd Wednesday is partially a public service announcement.

There is no need for bloggy/writing/conversational paranoia.

Really. I've had a lot of comments and e-mails along the lines of, "I'm not an English major, and I don't know grammar. You'll totally freak out reading my blog . . ."

But here's the thing: I won't. And I don't.

When I say that certain gaffs make me twitch, it's almost always in professional publications or other places like that.

Blogs and other casual settings, including daily conversation, aren't a big deal to me. Really, truly. There are places where the editor hat and the mental red pen go into a drawer and stay there.

An example, which has happened on many occasions:

A friend sends an e-mail, which I quickly read and reply to and don't think about again.

Five minutes later, another e-mail arrives, wherein the writer corrects her typo in the first e-mail, sure that I cringed reading it.

Here's the thing: I didn't even notice the typo, but now I have to go reread the e-mail and find the typo I'd glazed right over before.

(See, once it's pointed out, I have to look for it. It's like a cosmic law or something.)

Rest assured, I don't freak out over typos or grammar errors on blogs. I know they're not perfect, and they're not supposed to be.

Which is why I reserve the right to have typos and grammar errors on my blog as well. I have them frequently, and I figure that's okay.

Now for some actual WNW fun, a very common mistake people make:

Mixing up figuratively and literally

As with most errors, people generally go one direction with it, and in this case, it's using literally when they really mean figuratively.

Literally means it's actually, really, truly this way.

Figuratively, on the other hand, means that this is what something is like, but it's not really that way.

So if someone says, "I was so sick I literally coughed up a lung," they must be in the hospital (and likely on a transplant list) by now.

Or when someone says, "I was so happy I literally floated through the air," then you can assume they're living on some planet that has less gravity than Earth (or maybe they're holding onto a couple thousand helium balloons . . .).

When in doubt, think through what you mean. Is it really like that or are you trying to emphasize how bad/good/intense something was? If it's the latter, don't use literally.

Figuratively isn't nearly as fun to use (one reason I imagine that literally has been abused so much), so you can change up the sentence altogether, using neither:

"I swear, I was so sick I about coughed up a lung."

"I was so happy I practically floated on air."

See? Both of those work, make sense, and are actually feasible.

So what did we learn today?

1) No more bloggy/writing/speaking paranoia around here. Stop it already.

2) Literally and figuratively don't mean the same thing.

I'll literally be proud of anyone who uses them correctly. In fact, I'll figuratively burst with pride.

35 comments:

I never really thought about the literally thing. I suppose I always just looked at it as a way to double-emphasize hyperbole, and honestly, I'm not sure if I have ever used it that way or not. I'm so prone to exaggeration though, that I probably have.

If you want to twitch at something, the word verify for this post is worsest. :)

You know, I'm sure I would make less mistakes if I sat back to actually READ what I write. The problem is, I have so many blogs to read and comment on, and posts I write in dark moments right before bedtime (in other words, my eyes are already halfway closed), that I can't bother with proofreading. So what you see is what you get! I'm glad you explained anyway, that correct grammar is necessary in professional spaces, but kind of optional in blogland.

First of all, the fact that you can stand reading my blogs and comments and have NEVER once corrected me, is proof that you mean what you say and that paranoia is a wasted element in regard to your grammar nazi reputation.

Second, I feel so powerful to have played a part in the pie dilemma. I also feel rather guilty--here you are, grammaticion extraordinaire, and here I am, the village grammar idiot, and I critiqued you into a complex. How sad.

Aren't editors great? At least the good ones are. Glad you feel better. But but but --the literally ting--isn't it an exxageration? (Did I spell that right?) I mean, people know that they didn't literally cough up a lung, esp. since you can't. Isn't that what makes the statement funny? Stretching the meaning of words (such as plagiarism) is a comedic device. Right? (palms are sweaty and it's getting hot in here . . .)

I worry more over spelling than grammar on my own blog.Turthfully though, grammar is literally one of the reasons I haven't pursued writing more aggressively. I never went to college, and I really don't remember most of the rules of grammar from high school.I'm glad to know you aren't red lining every comment or post though.

Ok, how about we both figuratively bake each other a pie? The mood I'm in I could easily eat a whole real one, especially since I told James last night that I wish I had a bushel of peaches. But I'll take my pie baked. With cinnamon...mmm.

Since we're making post suggestions, I have one for you. How about the whole "could care less" instead of "couldn't care less". When people say "I could care less" my knee-jerk response always wants to be, "Well then, why don't you?"

I would post on it myself but you do it so eloquently and would reach far more people. I'm begging shamelessly!

Whew. Good to know you don't have spasms when you read my blog. I try to catch them them (like pokemon) but there's not much I can do it I don't know it's wrong!!!

Have you ever scene the MadTV sketch with the word "literally"? It is hilarious. Literally.

Sometimes I put grammatical errors in on purpose to be funny, then I get worried that people don't know I'm being funny. Like my title of "next biggest reality show ever." Kinda makes me cringe, but I also thought it was funny.

It reminds me of the Amish who put in a mistake on purpose so that it is not perfect. I think that people know that you twinge and try not to offend. Glad to know that you put your red pen down from time to time.

Speaking of WNW, I think we all just have a "We're Not Worthy" attitude towards you.Your literally/figuratively thing reminded me of something someone said that got on my nerves."Needless the say"They would say stuff like "needless to say, I went to the store" (that's a bad example, I can't think of the actual example)But I was thinking, yeah, you needed to say that, because otherwise I wouldn't have known! I don't think he really understand the actually purpose for using that phrase.Anyway, thought I'd join in the fun!Thanks, I love these Word Nerd posts!

That Mad TV sketch kills me. But just figuratively. This is one of my husband's biggest pet peeves and when I caught that on a channel flipping idle moment, I about killed myself laughing. Again, just figuratively.

Casual convo/email errors don't bother me. In fact, my mother tells me I speak like a hick and it makes her want to smack me.

But if it's a professional thing, where I'm supposed to pay money for it, or someone is earning money from it, more than a few grammar/vocab mistakes make me want to literally poke my eyes out with a fork.

I judge people's blogs. I admit it. And this girl once pointed out a mistake I made on a blog, and I almost killed her. She has the WORST grammar and spelling I've ever seen. And she mixes up homophones ALL the time. I almost snapped, but then I remembered IT'S JUST A BLOG! But now I remember how she corrected me when she's wrong all the time (like get's over there), and it makes me feel MUCH better....

My husband and I have the same problem with people saying literally! We hate it used wrong and mercifully make fun of people who do. You know who uses it a lot? People on HSN and QVC! Don't know why, but they are literally so exicted they're going to pee their pants when they are selling their wares. ;)

I'm a paranoid one. I should be better at the grammar thing, but one of my worst errors is mixing tenses. Thanks to you though, I've been taking a hard look at my writing and realizing I need to work on it!

another common word misspelling: exite instead excite---makes me want to say exit with an ai sound on the end.

Dear Rebecca,I don't know why I'm insisting on writing this so formally, but it may be partially due to the fact that at 15 - and grammatically more ignorant - I feel quite intimidated by your blog.I have never encountered any of your work, to my misfortune, but rest assured I am quite tempted after reading this blog.I was casually browsing the internet, looking to correct any flaws in my English grammar (as bored 15 year old boys do) and came to this blog.I think it's quite inspirational to still have people fighting for the integrity of the English language and would be honoured if anyone could decompose and point out any grammatical mistakes I may have made, in the writing of this reply.I hope to read more from you and would just like to say that you are a commendable individual and it was a pleasure to have crossed your blog. :)