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Thursday, March 9, 2017

Reflections from a
Seasoned Heart

By Anne Iverson

Have you ever said, “Boy,
if I knew than what I know now…” and wished you could go back to a particular
time in your childhood to alter a situation, ease some anxiety about the
unknown, give a hug, help a stranger or take back something you said?

We
know Kristen Fulton as an author and individual who gives generously and tirelessly to the
writing community, inspiring and encouraging us to create stories for children.
I invited Kristen to share a "reflection from a seasoned heart" and to write a letter to her child-self.

It’s difficult to open
one’s private life and share a slice of that life with others—friends and
strangers alike.She has an incredible
story to tell and as you read it, I’m sure you will experience the same emotional roller
coaster as I did.I have a great
appreciation for this incredible lady with an indomitable spirit, the tenacity
and inner strength to push forward, and the moxie to look the world in the eye
and face it head on.

Thank you, Kristen!

Dear Krissy,

Let
me start off by saying how proud I am of you. I know that we live in a
society where it is acceptable to compliment others but we shy away from
complimenting ourselves. I am going to do it for you. You are doing a
great job.

Let’s be honest, you have had a
cushy life. It is okay to tell your mom about that famous magician who
took you out to dinner even though he was like twenty-five when you were
seventeen. She is going to find out anyway when he ends up on the news
because this is what he likes to do. Oh and that sheriff that keeps
pulling you over whether you are speeding or not, he becomes the
coroner. Yes, it is job security but really, do you want the whole “I
see dead people.”

Now let’s talk about the real
issue that you are facing. You are scared. Sweetheart, it is time to
ask for help. You were raised in an affluent family where only those in
need were permitted to ask for help. Let me tell you- your friends want
to help. You NEED help. You can not do this on your own. For the last
year you have lived in an abusive marriage and this last time, come on.
You scared that paramedic, by the way, you and he will remain friends,
it was his first call and he was part of a team to cut you out of a car.
The sad part was, you weren’t in a car accident. Your husband threw you
the windshield. Did you know that young paramedic visited you every day
while you were in the coma? And that Heather from high school cheer was
the ER nurse when you were brought in? Krissy, I am here to tell you
that you DO NOT have to live like this. Leaving does not make you a
failure it will make you a success story. In fact, it will be just one
of many successes that you will experience in your life.

Now,
you want the good news? You are going to find love again, and this man
will be a keeper. He will be everything that romance writers write
about. He will send you love letters and flowers. When he is asked,
“How’s your life?” He will reply, “She is wonderful.” He will help you
achieve all of your life goals and dreams. You will get to spend another
year as Snow White at Epcot, you will finish your doctorate and open your own
Veterinary practice, and you will retire and spend your time as a
writer. He will stand by you and be your biggest cheerleader.

You
are a fighter and a survivor. This time in life seems hard, but it is
shaping you. These experiences will find their way on to the pages of
books for children and adults to read. Ernest Hemingway said it best,
There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and
bleed.

Your blood is made up of your life
experiences. The things you have done, seen, and learned. As a writer we
call this our voice. So, take a moment and slow down. Breathe. Soak it
all in and make a memory because you will use it to find another
success.

21 comments:

Such a difficult letter to read and probably a difficult one to write.

As I was reading it, lyrics came to mind: I've got all my life to live and I've got all my love to give and I'll survive...

She's definitely a survivor. Definitely a success. But most of all, those lyrics came to mind because she is always spreading the love. In the writers' world, she is constantly encouraging others, sharing her knowledge, offering enrollment in her awesome Nonfiction Archaeolog course as a prize in various contests, and so much more. And on a personal level, she is always good for a few laughs and fun and full of heart.

Kristen, I am so glad you left that miserable excuse of a human and found Rusty. Ya'll are a sweet couple.

Linda, I'm so glad you thought of song lyrics! A great many tunes went through my mind. Foremost was Cher's "If I Could Turn Back Time" (or similar title...) We use our life experiences to help us write better and Kristen has certainly developed into a wonderful writer and friend to all in the writing community. Thank you for your comment.

This must have been so hard to write - and scary, to share those deep, hurtful things. A good reminder that we never see the entire life of a person, only where they and we are now. Thanks for sharing.

Sue, Thank you for your comment, and yes, Kristen said it was difficult to write about this time in her life. We do base many of our stories on our own life experiences and sometimes can turn those difficult times into words of beauty.

Suzy, Thank you for your comment. I cannot tell you how much my admiration for Kristen has grown since she shared this slice of life story with me. She has used unfortunate circumstances to turn her words and stories into things of beauty. I'm so glad she shared!

Krissy, I hope you listen to Kristy. I have & it hurts to hear about the windshield, the cutting her out, the ER. But it also helps to hear about the first responder who becomes a friend, the ER nurse who watches over her. And to know about her dear for-life-man, Rusty. Krissy, please thank Kristy for sharing this letter.

On a personal note, I have felt before I have met Khristy in a another life. But I did not know about her Disney acting career. I wonder if she is the Snow White who brought a sparkle to our daughter in Orlando at The Castle! If not, she was a Sister Snow White in spirit, making dreams come true.

Finally, Anne, I appreciate what must be the depth of your friendship with Kristy, whois indeed Beautiful People.

Jan, thank you for your comment. As you know this was a difficult thing for Kristen to write, but the positive responses have been most encouraging and validating. Here's to the power of one incredible lady!

Kristen, what a beautiful letter. Many women don't make it out of toxic relationships for myriad reasons, fear, lack of support, low self-esteem, etc. I'm glad you did. Thanks for sharing from your heart.

Wow! Absolutely heart-wrenching, Kristen. Thanks for sharing this with us. And look what God gave you through it all . . . Prince Charming. And SO much more. You are a winner, Kristen, and I'm blessed to know you.

Kristen thank you for pouring out your heart and showing us your strength and courage. Thank God for Rusty❤ This quote makes me thing of you. "It is good to love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is well done."~Vincent Van Gogh

"Steel Magnolia" comes to mind. We never know what another person has faced or is facing. From tragedy comes the triumph of the human spirit; Kristen exudes that. As others have said, our experiences can find themselves in our manuscripts' characters or story line. Brave one, thank you. And Anne, what a thoughtful assignment.

Thanks Anne for sharing a slice of Kristen's life. I've never thought of writing a letter to my younger self - there is courage and wisdom in the effort. Thanks Kristen for sharing more of yourself with us. You are definitely an inspiration.

First let me start off by apologizing for my delay is reply. You know your story, a few friends know your story, and you may even be able to verbalized or write your story, but to share it with everyone is something totally different. Anne can tell you that this was hard for me and a few times it was almost a "no go." For those that know Rusty then you understand why I don't gamble, I already won the lottery with him. And for me, my grandma used to tell me that you had to bite into something to truly understand it because even the cheapest chocolate Easter Bunny looks delicious until you bite in to it and discover that it is all hollow and not very good. So, I guess I gave y'all a bite. Thank you for your words. Rusty deserves a lot of credit. He chased me even after I continued to run and he was patient in his "deprogramming."