The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child by Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D.

We live in a world where extroverts make up 2/3rds of the population.
In Western culture, extroverts are more likely to meet the social
expectation that is our "outgoing, energised" ideal person.

Meet the introvert: The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child can help
parents identify both introverted and extroverted children, and
highlights the common differences between the two temperaments.

Marti reveals what gifts introverts have. These gifts range from the
tendency to be less likely to cause trouble, have more long-standing
friendships, be gifted in creativity, and shockingly enough- that we
have better conversational skills (different from "social chit-chat"
skills)!

Ms. Laney pointed out the quirks introverts have which tend to be
viewed as major flaws by society. I grew up under the introvert
cloud: that I somehow wasn't normal or good enough, because of the
regular critiques of my social antics, or lack thereof.

Western human standards make for a discriminatory environment for
introverts. We're often told something is wrong with us because we're
the last to participate, or we're homebodies, and so on. One biggie:
We'll say "hi" back, even speak, but we're "quiet" and often take time
to warm up- so we're wrongly labelled as "shy," snobby, or broken.

In light of Marti's observations, thinking about how self critical
I've been almost makes me want to cry. As I read on she showed just
how normal these so called faults are. Faults I had withdrawn because
of, or torn myself up for the sake of. I've tried to be more
"extroverted," but during past attempts I've ended up being more of a
social deadbeat than ever. I'm not alone as an introvert square
having tried to fit into the extrovert circle, with draining results.

Some of the research that stood out included how "innie" brains work.
Marti showed exactly why I, as an introvert, don't have the "get up
and go" as extroverts do. (Another thing I would beat myself up
over!) Our brain makeup, the pathways in which information is
processed, is different between the two temperaments. There are
even more physically apparent differences between the two
temperaments. I've always had cold hands and feet- which is
apparently an introvert physical trait! Apparently I'm a textbook
introvert, and not so freaky-weird after all!

The best part of The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child is that if
you have an introverted child, understanding this temperament can save
both you and the child from a lot of unnecessary stress and hurt. Out
of 300 pages, well over 2/3 address parenting an innie. I highlighted
many of the tips, from diet to home environment, which I am enacting
in my adult life. I've also changed my social outlook. Instead of
trying to fit the extrovert mould, I will use my introvert gifts.
Instead of trying to be a social butterfly, I will smile and search
for a couple good, close friends to make up my inner social circle.