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Do You Have It?
September 22

Monday, September 15
brought the premiere of a classic game show. Classic, anyway, if you're
in your mid-twenties and watched Nickelodeon back in the day when game
shows were bigger than life, exciting and made for kids. If you fit that
bill, or maybe even if you don't, you might remember GUTS. A
long-lasting staple of Nickelodeon, it offered the chance of a lifetime
for three kids: they were able to live out sports fantasies on a grand
stage, culminating in a 30-foot climb up a prefabricated rock face to
see who would emerge victorious.

Nickelodeon has brought
back the show, making some changes. Some are OK, some aren't so hot. Two
families of four relatives compete over the half hour, and the winners
move up in an eleven-game tournament ending with the Aggro Bowl, to
determine the winners. The format has changed, and that's a good thing.
Under the old rules, every episode would end with scores of 400-200 or
even on 300.

In the first event,
each second is worth a point, just like a decathlon. In the second
event, successes are worth 10 points each. These points translate into a
head start up the Aggro Crag for the leaders. The team whose
representative presses the final button at the top of the peak wins and
moves on to the next round.

The first two events
carry over that larger-than-life feeling from the original, but the
whole thing falls apart when we get to the Aggro Crag. One team member
takes off from the base, navigating switchbacks, sharp ledges, and the
various hazards created by the property guys (various bits of glitter,
confetti, plastic balls, and strobe lights.) Upon reaching their final
button, another teammate is released to start climbing a sheer rock face
with hand grips, with the final button at the top of the mountain. It is
not quite aggro, for sure. And then there's the whole thing about
limiting the head start to seven seconds, making any lead bigger than 70
points wasted.

With no segue, I bring
the discussion to the presenters. Ben Lyons is affable enough, but gives
the vibe of a B-squad Mike O'Malley, except decidedly less amped up. The
referee, Australia's Asha Kuerten, has a delightful accent but doesn't
look like a referee. She doesn't really have anything to do except be
there and be adorable. (Which isn't bad, but even Mo ran down the
penalties and stuff.)

If you haven't seen the
new version of GUTS, you're not missing a whole lot. Maybe the one-hour
final will be different, but the family edition, much like that of The
Amazing Race, gives the vibe of being less than the original. And that's
too bad.