Rough Day...

Wednesday, September 05, 2012

Today started out well. At the last minute, I decided to walk to the grocery store instead of driving my car at 0600 this morning. I needed to get fixings for Emma's lunch and I wanted to get my walk in. So I killed 2 birds with one stone. Everything I purchased except one item was for Em. It was that one item that turned my day into a rough one: a bag of Doritos-family sized no less.

So I dropped Emma off to daycare, came home and made my protein shake with Vi shape mix, strawberries and peaches. Within that hour, I had opened the bag and had 2 bowls of Doritos. Then I went back for more. Eventually I found myself drifting into a carb induced sleep. I woke up and then after an hour had some more.

DH came home and we talked for a bit. Then I came back to the bedroom and polished off the remainder of the bag. I got ready to go pick Emma up and was completely disgusted with myself. That lovely bag left me feeling like crap, I had an attitude with people and I was weepy all at the same time.

As I walked to my car, I knew I would be writing a blog about this. You see, for me, this past year, I made some big strides in part of my carb addictions. Last July I went on a no sugar diet. Only thing I had for that month was fresh fruit. I eventually went back but stayed away completely from ice cream to this day. In January, I expanded that to all sugar except for fruit. So I've fought the sugar demon with the help of God. Now I know I need to do the same with chips. Last month I got into junk crunchy snacks like Pringles (sour cream & onion only), Cheetos and Doritos. I've kicked the first two to the curb. Now I need to do the same with the last. The only way I can do this is by turning to & leaning on God. I have to do the work. He will be my strength! I cannot do it alone.

I wanted to share this here where I feel safe and can be myself. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I plan to continue blogging here so I can stay accountable. I'm so grateful to have SP on this journey. I'm determined to do this!!

Sometimes just confessing to it makes you feel better. I hope that is the case. Mistake done now move on. You learned a lesson today, it was a hard lesson to learn but now you know that you can't buy those again. I do that with cookies sometimes. I have 2 then go back again and again and the whole bag is gone. It happens to everyone.

First off let me give you a (((HUG))), we have all had our moments, Lord knows I've had mine, and it's hard not to beat yourself up but try hard not to. For me I chalk it up as a moment of weakness and an opportunity for me to think of how to learn from it and avoid it in the future. I agree with the small bag idea, because if you are like me when the craving hits you and you feel physically ill until you have what you are craving, you are more likely to go WAY overboard as opposed to just a small side-step.

You have to remember you didn't get this way overnight and trying to tackle all of your issues at once isn't realistic, carbs and sweets are HARD to let go of, but like your penguin says on your page, just take one step at a time, I take things one day at a time, like your blog from a few days back says, make a bridge and get over it, you are strong and amazing - just keep taking your days like your steps, one at a time. (((HUGS)))

Simone, sugar and salty carbs are two of the hardest food addictions to break. Luckily, I don't crave chips, doritos, etc., but I battle constantly with sugar and still have not totally eliminated anything other than sugar from fruit from my diet.

It's tough, but you have done amazing with your other carb-demons and I know that you can conquer this one too. I also like Joe_Anne's suggestion of buying a small bag if you are tempted, may help!

You realized it and had the guts to share it with people you trust. It's done and over. Onward and forward chickadee. Keep giving it to God. He will give you the strength when you don't think you can do it on your own. Love ya!

Simone, next time buy the smallest bag, cause if you want more than make yourself walk to get it. Or if you decide to share that small bag it would be much better that eating it all yourself. For me, just having a sandwich is enough unless I have a fruit. I also use the Vi shakes for breakfast and as an afternoon snack. Be blessed Simone