Thursday, September 04, 2008

My Garmin Contradicts Common Sense

Wherein I question the omnipotence of Garmin while providing a One Mile Virtual Race Report.

If there is one thing I have taken for granted, it is the infallibility of Garmin (praise be thy name). In fact, when saying or typing “Garmin” (praise be thy name) you’ll notice that I often include ‘praise be thy name’ afterwards. Re-read the first two sentences if you suffer from poor attention span. You’ll see this in action twice. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Moving on. I bring this up as, you might expect, I’ve had reason recently to question Garmin (p.b.t.n). It pains me to say it but here are two examples within the past few runs.

Here I am merrily running along on a scheduled 9 miler last Thursday. Periodically, I glance down at Garmin (p.b.t.n) to see if somehow I’ve transcended time or, at least, to take note of pace. At some point, I was at 3.13 miles. A few minutes later, I glance down again but now my distance is at 2.84 miles?? That’s odd. I’ve actually run backwards in time. At first, I’m thinking this is pretty cool. Like Marty McFly, maybe I’ll end up seeing myself take off on this run and can warn myself to avoid the swarm of gnats that I sucked down my throat. Next, I thought, maybe Garmin(p.b.t.n.) is punishing me for my relaxed pace and I should pick it up a bit.

As I kept running, I noticed the distance going down steadily until 2.00 miles and then it started over at 2.99 miles and counted backwards again. I’m pretty sure the distance is supposed to go UP as you run even if you run backwards, which I rarely do anyhow.*

I put the little fella on the charger when I got home and chalked it up as a fluke. He might have been a little tired. Sometimes we runners forget that training can be difficult on personal global positioning systems as well.

The next occurrence of potential Garmin(p.b.t.n) fallibility occurred this past Tuesday evening as I decided to incorporate Reid’s Virtual One Mile Race challenge into my scheduled 5 miler. After a 1 ¾ mile warm-up to the local high school track, I marked my starting time and distance with the Lap button and took off for 4 laps. Everything I see and read tells me that 4 laps roughly equal 1 mile. In fact, if anything, one true mile might actually be a few steps past the 4 lap mark.

I’m cruising along feeling real good. I had no expectations going into this one mile virtual race so I was feeling loose and relaxed. I thought I’d come in around 5:30 minutes for the mile. Garmin(p.b.t.n.) surprises me by beeping as I’m entering the last turn about 100 meters from my lap line which is just outside of this turn. That’s odd. Again, I’m wondering what is up here. I ran in Lane 1 along the inside painted line so, really, I couldn’t have added much extra distance to each lap.

The time? 5:16.

Now, I’m thrilled if that is the actual time. Garmin (p.b.t.n.) says it is so. My basic knowledge of a standard track tells me I needed to complete 4 full laps though.

I tried to take a picture of my Garmin(p.b.t.n.) display – along with my favorite ice cube** – but haven’t mastered the finer points of Garmin (p.b.t.n.) photography. It wouldn’t develop clearly.

I think I’ll need to try this challenge again to see what Garmin(p.b.t.n.) decrees the next time.

If I can’t trust Garmin(p.b.t.n.), who can I trust?

Happy trails.

*Incidentally, is anyone else annoyed by the scene in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off where the wacky kids decided to “roll back” the odometer on the rich kid’s dad’s car by putting the car in reverse with a block on the gas pedal. Eventually, the car bursts through the back of the garage to its destruction. Before that, however, the crazy kids are surprised to see that after supposedly an hour of trying not one mile rolled back. In fact, the miles were rolling ahead. Did anyone think to verify what was happening with the odometer before, like, an HOUR went by? Stupid kids.

**I’ve had this ice cube for years and it’s really adorable. I wanted to get a photo of it for all of you to see but, now that I think of it, did I get it back in the freezer?

36 comments:

Man, I will have to treat my Garmin better from now on! Although I've only had this thing a short while I can't imagine running without it. Your experience would frustrate the hell out of me and I'd mope around the house in a funky mood until the problem was fixed. A speaker cutting in and out can do this to me, so a Garmin snafu may make me beserk! If you are brave you might want to run your next mile with the Garmin and another watch as backup, though this may only serve to confirm your worst fears. Perhaps ignorance, no matter how annoying, is still bliss... I look forward to your post about the problem/solution on the Garmin front.

Ok, I would say your Garmin was sick. But mine did the same thing during speed laps on Wednesday morning.

It got to the four mile mark. Stopped, slowed to walk for a bit... ran down the hill, and whoa... I was back to 3.5 miles. By the time I got home my little buddy claimed I'd only done 7.2 miles. (It was definitely, at least 8.)

Last week it added mileage. I reckon maybe it's making up for it. Anyway, I updated all the software and dropped the prophets and Garmin an email. I wonder if it's a satelite issue?

That's wack, but not outside the realm of possibility for what I now refer to as the most expensive sweatband ever invented. If you get a new one, I suggest you not get a 405. I don't know anyone who considers it an improvement over the 305.

I celebrated the one-year Birthday of my Garmin (p.b.t.n.) last month (try running with a Birthday hat strapped to your wrist!) and then she (mine's a girl) started acting up. Every so often she just won't turn on... :(

Maybe the battery is starting to fail like Mike's did (after only 18 months of use). The only solution to that is give them a credit card number, they charge you $99, you send it to them and they send you back a refurbished one (not the same one you sent in).

How long does this whole process take? I have no idea, ours is still sitting here waiting for something to be done with it. Meanwhile I hear pissing and moaning after each run because it is without the almighty Garmin.

The going backwards thing is really odd...I'd buy a sattelite/triangulation problem as a reason for the short mile, but backwards distance doesn't make any sense.

I thought about Ferris Bueller before I read your asterisk. I also remember the parents did that in the book Matilda and even as a little kid I didn't understand how you could run the wheels backwards and have the odometer go down. Silly!

Only problem I've encountered with mine is total user error: not recharging the batteries after one run and trying to use it for a run the next day. 2 miles in - bu-bye statistics, hello blank screen. To give it credit, it did give me a sad little trill of a warning before leaving me. *sigh* That was a sad day, BUT I did learn my lesson - recharge after every run. Water and snack for me, electric juice for G.

My Garmin (Cursed by thy name) is a real piece o' crap. He ('cause it's a dude and his name is Vic) works only sporadically, which is incredibly frustrating. Sometimes I'll go weeks with no issues, then he'll take leave of his senses and start racking up the miles like craaazy, indicating that I'm running like 13 second miles. In Vic's defense, we did buy him used, and I'm a sweathog. But still...

I think I might be losing faith in the Great Garmin (pbtn, just to be on the side ... I guess I'm an agnostic). It's always spotted me 100 metres or so on any race, plus it doesn't work under a canopy of trees (either that or trees make me run slow) and it crapped out on me mid-18K last Sunday despite being fresh from the charger. I'm probably going to hell.

I have not had the running backwards problem but my Garmin (pbtn) has recorded some amazing elevation spikes, including two instances where I supposedly ran over 300 feet of changed elevation in less than a tenth of a mile. Unfortunately, I have no recollection of such massive hills, but Garmin (pbtn) cannot be wrong so I must have wiped such awful hills out of my memory.