Friday, October 9, 2015

Possession 101 + Giveaway

Oh, Halloween, a time when the dead rise and your loved ones are unexpectedly possessed by some lesser demon. Some things are unavoidable, so I'm here today to point out the signs of a potential possession. Welcome to

Stare into Dark Spaces for Long Period of Times

Have you noticed your friend or loved one staring off into space a lot lately? Do they stare into corners of the room or the basement? Have you caught them sitting in the dark for hours at a time? Experts differ on the amount of time used staring into the abyss is needed to diagnosis your friend with possession. Most times range from 30 minutes-90 minutes. I personally recommend that you call your local exorcist if you've noticed your friend silently staring for 45 minutes or more.

Strong Smell of Rotten Eggs

Your friend opens his/her mouth and it smells like he/she is in desperate need of an introduction to a toothbrush. Before rushing to offer a mint, take a minute and get a good whiff. Does it smell like rotten eggs? Yes? Okay, now are you anywhere near a farm or in a kitchen? No? You've got yourself a classic possession. Smoothly excuse yourself from your friend. You may opt to leave the mints with your friend, but it's best if you keep your distant until a priest can be contacted.

Dolls?

Is your friend a teenager or adult but suddenly has a fascination with dolls? Run, do not walk. Your friend is possessed and cannot be saved. And on the off chance that your friend is NOT possessed, think about it, do you really want to be friends with someone obsessed with dolls? I didn't think so.

Walking Like a Puppet

Several experts have confirmed that early signs of possession can be detected by simply looking at the legs. Demons are not familiar with the human body and often walk like they are being controlled (as they are) by an external force. If your friend looks slightly uncomfortable in his/her body and is suddenly doing back bends (without a history of dance of gymnastics), experts say that you possibly have a possession on hand. You can go to www.Exorcism4U.com to download the tape measure you can use to confirm if your friend is possessed. If your friend is bent at more than a 90 degree angle, you need a priest.

Possession can happen to anyone, no one is 100% protected; however it is important to know the signs. The Vatican would like to remind the public that amateurs should not try to exorcise the demon themselves. In most cases, you'll piss the demon off even more, or end up killing yourself in the process. You can find more information by calling 800-The-Vatkn.

This post was inspired by the following books:

Now it's time for homework! I'm giving away an ARC of The Merciless by Danielle Vega. Please write a five-page essay detailing the proper ways of handling a possible possession using the novel.

This giveaway is U.S. only.

Giveaway Ends October 29

Forgive us, Father, for we have sinned
Brooklyn Stevens sits in a pool of her own blood, tied up and gagged. No one outside of these dank basement walls knows she’s here. No one can hear her scream.
Sofia Flores knows she shouldn’t have gotten involved. When she befriended Riley, Grace, and Alexis on her first day at school, she admired them, with their perfect hair and their good-girl ways. They said they wanted to save Brooklyn. They wanted to help her. Sofia didn’t realize they believed Brooklyn was possessed.
Now, Riley and the girls are performing an exorcism on Brooklyn—but their idea of an exorcism is closer to torture than salvation. All Sofia wants is to get out of this house. But there is no way out. Sofia can’t go against the other girls . . . unless she wants to be next. . . .
In this chilling debut, Danielle Vega delivers blood-curdling suspense and terror on every page. By the shockingly twisted end, readers will be faced with the most haunting question of all: Is there evil in all of us (goodreads)?