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Where's my lover...

First of all, I'm very pleased to be here. Pardon my enthusiasm, but I was feeling all alone for too long...

Here's my story. (I never been bright for this kind of things...)
I felt in love with a married INFJ...
Everything began here.
I don't know how or why, but it's happened. We lived great moments, but we (I) decided that it must have an end.

Later, I realised, that it was already too late for my part...I was too attached to her, really too much...

I returned to her and begged for pardon, and to leave her husband for me...
Her attitude toward changed from white to black. She became cold and said that she love her man and will never leave him for me. She also said that she did not want to have to deal with me anymore.
I don't know why but I felt in her at this moment a great sorrow too...

Times later, I saw her with another man who wasn't her husband...
I never felt such an intense pain in my life. This pain kept on and on during months...

Some months later, I heard that this man was going to get married. And by coincidence, she too was on her way to divorce...

My pain attained paroxysm.

It had to stop ! I decided to demand her directly if it happened something between the two of them. She answered negatively and said that it was just her confident. She took it bad by the same opportunity...

I didn't trust her. I went directly to the other guy and asked him the same thing.
He confirmed that he was getting married but with another women and treated me as a paranoid. He said that it's been a very long time since the last time he spoke with her.

Perhaps I'm really paranoid ?
Why did she divorced ?!! She said that she'll never do it...

I know that she left his husband for another one, I'm sure of this statement.

I'm here cause I thought some INFJ might help me with this.
So please...

What exactly, pertaining to the situation, are you looking for help with? What is the outcome you want to achieve?

Did she lied ? IS she lying ? Are they lying ? Or I'm I just insane...

WHY was she avoiding me while the only thing that I did was loving her ? Did she really do that cause she was married ?

I'm telling my self that...perhaps...she left her husband for me and thought that I didn't want to assume responsibility, and that I was just acting...cause I cut contact with her. (The pain was insupportable...)

I forgot a detail...
After I spoken to the other guy about the relation between the two. I had a conversation with a friend of her and I told her about the conversation I had with the men.
By mistake this one repeated all to the women I love. She said that she became furious after she took acquaintance of what I did. Why ?!

She told you that she was done. She doesn't want you in her life. She doesn't want you talking to acquaintances and accusing them of being her lovers and she most certainly doesn't want you to repeat the conversation you had with her acquaintances to her friends and hear third hand that you not only aren't getting the message but you are becoming a little...paranoid and stalkerish. At this point, cut your losses and realize she's not ever going to come back to you. The more you push, the more adament and angry she is going to be. If you haven't been doorslammed yet, you will be soon.

You sound like a wingnut to me and like English might be your third language.

It is !
Bien vu.

Originally Posted by fidelia

She told you that she was done. She doesn't want you in her life. She doesn't want you talking to acquaintances and accusing them of being her lovers and she most certainly doesn't want you to repeat the conversation you had with her acquaintances to her friends and hear third hand that you not only aren't getting the message but you are becoming a little...paranoid and stalkerish. At this point, cut your losses and realize she's not ever going to come back to you. The more you push, the more adament and angry she is going to be. If you haven't been doorslammed yet, you will be soon.

Ok...most probably...thank you.
And about the fact that she was lying or not ? What do you think ?