Wait, where is she??? I JUST MADE A WHOLE NEW CHANNEL FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Liberace, an insanely wealthy woman in Australia would like to buy this domain. I'm sure you'd think I'd be right up in the front lines rootin' for this business transaction, but no.

Because SENDAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

However, if you'd like to negotiate with her financial people, lemme know.

As for me, my life is now dedicated to trying to STOP HER from sending any more $$$ to Senda.

The rest of you would do well to stop TROLLING her and try to start EDUCATING her in a VERY GENTLE WAY. I nominate Rally Squirrel.

(Seriously, you guys. She really is terminally ill, and this is Saint Seraphim talking: She's trying to do some good in the world. We all need to join forces and GENTLY and KINDLY show her that SENDA is not the mark she wants to leave on the world.)

And HELL YES, I'm bitter. Any and all MONEYS in that respect should go to ME.

Wait, where is she??? I JUST MADE A WHOLE NEW CHANNEL FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Liberace, an insanely wealthy woman in Australia would like to buy this domain. I'm sure you'd think I'd be right up in the front lines rootin' for this business transaction, but no.

Because SENDAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

However, if you'd like to negotiate with her financial people, lemme know.

As for me, my life is now dedicated to trying to STOP HER from sending any more $$$ to Senda.

The rest of you would do well to stop TROLLING her and try to start EDUCATING her in a VERY GENTLE WAY. I nominate Rally Squirrel.

(Seriously, you guys. She really is terminally ill, and this is Saint Seraphim talking: She's trying to do some good in the world. We all need to join forces and GENTLY and KINDLY show her that SENDA is not the mark she wants to leave on the world.)

And HELL YES, I'm bitter. Any and all MONEYS in that respect should go to ME.

You lives as a lesbian, what the fuck does that even mean? Did you read Black Like Me and decide to do your own take on it, Dyke like me?

And why did it stop after 15 years, as the experiment over? Did you decide to live as a pansexual and see how that was?

Me living as a lesbian means I was out of the closet. I said in the post that I endured every typical oppression gay people endure, so I don't see why you are challenging me. Oppressions such as being thrown out of my parent's home and having nowhere to go before age 21 while a full time student. Such as being terrified alone on the way home, by a man who stalked women after they left gay establishments (That same day he did kill a lesbian walking alone; I had mace out so maybe he didn't want me). Such as not being able to do normal, spontaneous sharing at work or school about my personal life. Such as not finding acceptance in many churches. Such as feeling my soul was so squeezed that my identity was smashed between who I am versus who the world wanted me to be, which resulted in painful decisions. Such as knowing my male friends were living with agonizing fatal disease and dying young. And many more oppressions I don't have time to dredge up right now.

Millions of lesbians start out dating men, get married, have children and then in their 40s decide to live as lesbians. Happens all the time, at least during my generation. People change.

I don't think of anything as "ending". I am still me. Three Dimensional. Don't be so linear. If you want to get into the dynamics of my psycho-sexual development and the kind of extended family that fostered it, we could talk about the root reasons for the change. Would you ask someone coming out as gay (after a marriage or whatever) the reason for the "end" of their heterosexuality? Would you ask a tranny their rationale for wanting to "end" their gender?

A bisexual person could theoretically live as either persuasion for a while and retrospectively speak of lesbians as "them". That seems to me the simplest explanation.

I was attracted to women. I never felt "bi". When I was gay, I was gay. 100%. My Dad hated it. My mom hated it. My siblings hated it. I couldn't tell family friends. Some family friends were very uncomfortable, so over the years I lost touch with peers because their parents had been uncomfortable. Being gay was a sacrifice, due to societal intolerance at the time. Having no innate support from anyone from childhood family or friends, I had little choice but to become immersed in the gay community, where I remained for a very long time. I really don't see any issue here.

More than a decade later, I went through some changes regarding something that happened to me as a child. Afterward, I gravitated toward men more and I am not sexually attracted to women anymore. It would be really difficult even trying to be interested in a woman romantically. Does not sound appealing at all.

I often wish I still were gay. When I was gay, I didn't have to put up with ANY of the bullsh** men pull on women. I was free, liberated from the effects of male "privilege" in my personal life. It was wonderful. I miss that most. But, there really doesn't seem to be any turning back.

This isn't that uncommon; it's just usually done in the reverse order. Women of my generation usually lived straight lives and finally found who they really were in middle age when their children were grown and peri-menopause set in. I'm not unique - I just did it in the opposite order. I have always been one to tackle the hard stuff first and not procrastinate. I knew being gay would be a sacrifice of family, childhood friends, and family friends. I decided to get it done and get on with it early. I just came out, got it done and moved on earlier than most people of my generation.

As for what happened 15 years later, well, people change. Some people decide to get divorced. Others need a sex change. Others come out of the closet. People LIVE - that means they grow and change. Labels don't matter that much.

I'm sure that you will be upset and offended by this observation. But, I'm going to put on my official self appointed life coach hat for a moment...

It is very interesting that you use the phrase "I suffered everything some of them suffer" I'm sure you will not take it to heart, and you will deny it- but to a casual observer, it seems like you are trying to distance yourself from "them".

Before you completely dismiss this, consider if you would say that as a woman you suffered everything that some of them suffer? Probably not. If you have been "out" for 15 years, I have to assume that for a large part of your life you denied it to the outside world, and probably to yourself as well- and there may still be a piece that wants to be separate.

Let the walls of text and anger begin (rather than honest reflection.) This time I promise (sort of) not to say much. You can say that it was just an honest error in communication, that you are fully accepting, and I will at least try not to argue. Just a brief observation from your friendly neighbourhood life coach...

I could do without inaccurate character assassination at the beginning of your last paragraph. And I never censored you or said you talk to much. It's not how much you say; it's the words you choose.

And I never claimed to be fully accepting of lesbians so don't put words in my mouth. I was a lesbian for 15 years, and I support the gay community. But no one, NO ONE, needs to be "fully" accepting, as you suggest. The gay community is rife with addiction, immorality, mobbing, as well as every other problem that every social group has. Nothing makes gay people saints just because they are gay. In every group, whether gay, straight, green or purple, you will find wonderful people as well as not-so-wonderful people. Also, minority communities suffer special dysfunctions because their people are united by only one thing in common. Whereas, WASP communities tend to gather around common values (churches, associations, politics). But, gays on the whole only have one value in common: That of being gay. So, socially, being in the gay community is a real mixed bag. I don't think "fully accepting" is a relevant term for a group so large. I mean, I'm not "fully accepting" of any political party, any religious denomination, any huge group - because huge groups always have underbellies. It makes me angry that you would presume how you think I should think I should feel ("fully accepting"). Especially since you've missed the whole gist of me not even being gay.

Of course I said "them" for gays. Of course I had to distance myself. Because I can't use the word "us". Because I'm not gay. Duh.

Hating the idea of being in the closet, I came out gay early in young adult life. It took a lot of courage because the losses I suffered afterward were high. I was very young to be so disdained by family and so unsupported by family friends. Uh, yes, the "piece that wants to be separate" from gayness started about 17 years ago when I was much older and went straight. I would like you to have a better understanding of basic post facts before confronting me.

Anyhow, it's not that I "have been out for 15 years". It's that I WAS out for 15 years.

You've missed the over-arching point here, which is that Brig ate her own when she mobbed me.

I could do without inaccurate character assassination at the beginning of your last paragraph. And I never censored you or said you talk to much. It's not how much you say; it's the words you choose.

And I never claimed to be fully accepting of lesbians so don't put words in my mouth. I was a lesbian for 15 years, and I support the gay community. But no one, NO ONE, needs to be "fully" accepting, as you suggest. The gay community is rife with addiction, immorality, mobbing, as well as every other problem that every social group has. Nothing makes gay people saints just because they are gay. In every group, whether gay, straight, green or purple, you will find wonderful people as well as not-so-wonderful people. Also, minority communities suffer special dysfunctions because their people are united by only one thing in common. Whereas, WASP communities tend to gather around common values (churches, associations, politics). But, gays on the whole only have one value in common: That of being gay. So, socially, being in the gay community is a real mixed bag. I don't think "fully accepting" is a relevant term for a group so large. I mean, I'm not "fully accepting" of any political party, any religious denomination, any huge group - because huge groups always have underbellies. It makes me angry that you would presume how you think I should think I should feel ("fully accepting"). Especially since you've missed the whole gist of me not even being gay.

Of course I said "them" for gays. Of course I had to distance myself. Because I can't use the word "us". Because I'm not gay. Duh.

Hating the idea of being in the closet, I came out gay early in young adult life. It took a lot of courage because the losses I suffered afterward were high. I was very young to be so disdained by family and so unsupported by family friends. Uh, yes, the "piece that wants to be separate" from gayness started about 17 years ago when I was much older and went straight. I would like you to have a better understanding of basic post facts before confronting me.

Anyhow, it's not that I "have been out for 15 years". It's that I WAS out for 15 years.

You've missed the over-arching point here, which is that Brig ate her own when she mobbed me.

Don't get it confused Sixteen. You may be one of my favorite posters, but we have nothing, let me repeat, nothing in common, and I have never considered you "one of my own".

With all that said, you are one of my favorite posters, because you make me laugh a lot, and I like to laugh.

A bisexual person could theoretically live as either persuasion for a while and retrospectively speak of lesbians as "them". That seems to me the simplest explanation.

I've thought a lot about bisexuality. I have many years to look back on, though. Early in life, it would have been simplistic to say I was bi. So, I never said it. Because I didn't feel bi. There were transitions. Like most gays, I had heterosexual experiences before cementing my lesbian ways. But, I was consternated about not identifying as gay. I don't think a truly bi person would have felt so consternated.

Aren't most people aware of attractive or interesting potential mates most of the time? Like, in an average month, surely the average Jane or Joe sees at least, at least 5 people they could be interested in. Surely we can all agree on that very low estimate, right? Many people mentally sleep with every women the see! So, being attracted to 5 people a month, whether real or on TV, even just for a moment, is probably well within normal sexual behavior. Do you agree? So, to take that logic further, I was lesbian for about 180 months. And yet, I only remember being attracted to two guys. Ever. And I got around - I was at points a student working multiple jobs, a full time employee of a very large corporation, a big socializer, etc... So, I just don't think the label "bi" applied.

Then there was a transitional period while I reconsidered my sexual identity 17 years ago. For a couple years, I hovered between the gay community and the straight community when I socialized. I just didn't feel gay anymore at all. In the 17 years since I have been straight, I have only really even noticed one female at all "that way". Considering the average person sees 5 people a month who they find attractive or romantically interesting, and considering I've been straight for over 200 months, and I've only noticed on woman that way, then I just don't think I'm bi. If I were bi, I also wouldn't feel slightly repelled by the general thought of being romantic with a woman.

So, there have only been three counter sexual-identity attractions in 15+17 years. You'd expect a lot more from a bi person. And each of those three people were androgynous in appearance and personality. So they probably don't even really count as counter sexual-identity attractions.

I think this just sums up that labels help society understand people, but labels shouldn't be too contrived because not every situation involves snap judgments and sound bytes.