“If you want to learn about how to conduct illicit affairs with interns why not learn from the master? That’s what Dave did, he got Clinton in to the show and he asked him how he did it so goddamn well. Bill is an expert in interns and during his tenure at the White House, he went though hundreds of them. Some say thousands. It was only when he got caught out with Monica Lewinsky on the end of his porker that he was brought out to pasture as they say,” Mr Pozlowski told the New York Times.

The Late Show’s host, David Letterman, was always in awe of Mr Clinton’s prowess in porking interns and not getting caught but instead of having his end away without any comeback he got a serious case of the extortions.

“Extortion?”

“First thing I want to know is what kind of an idiot extortioner tries to cash in a cheque for $2 million? The guy must be a total moron of the highest order,” Letterman said on his talkshow last night while an intern serviced him from underneath his desk.

Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton was nowhere to be seen after it had been revealed that her husband was the inspiration for Letterman’s downfall.

“Bill even suggested that Letterman should make sure the pretty interns wear white dresses instead of blue ones, that way you can get away with a lot more. He also told Dave how to keep a secret bedroom like the one he has in his presidential library and the one in the White House that he got the secret service boys to fix for him during his presidency,” Mr Pozlowski added.

One thing is for sure, they both have some very understanding wives, either that or some selfless doorsteps willing to put up with their philandering hubbies so that they can enjoy the money and status they would otherwise not have.

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