advanced reading copy of ADOPTING GRACE
41 of 186

brought my own shame out of the darkness and into the light, it shattered into a thousand pieces. **** If we are not willing to claim and acknowledge our transgressions, we perpetuate a cycle of anxiety, shame, and striving to have a glittering image even when we may be in reality falling apart. In the early days as mom to my daughters, my internal self contained an unsustainable mix. While I felt a great deal of guilt, fear, and shame, it was all tangled up with a righteous, “holier than thou” attitude. There were lessons I needed to learn about the multiple faces of shame. Shame is a destructive and powerful five-letter word that resides deep within many a heart. “A fact or circumstance bringing disgrace or regret,” says dictionary.com. Shame is often disguised under layer upon layer of pain and coping mechanisms, yet it is an invisible fire that burns and destroys. As it silently sets up camp in our souls, it then robs our joy and rightful place as beloved children of God. Its greatest ally is secrecy. Shame is most potently defeated by vulnerably sharing our stories of scandal and humiliation with fellow life journeyers whom we know to be trustworthy. I know a thing or two about this silent thief. Our acquaintance began when as a child I assimilated the dominant message I heard in church. It was a message of right vs. wrong, good vs. bad, with a heavy dose of instruction on how to behave in a way to avoid the flames of hell. It seared my tender ADOPTING GRACE ADVANCED READING COPY 41