NEW YORK (CAP) - America's 7-year-old boys have chosen "poop" as their Word of the Year for the 26th consecutive time, a spokesman for the group announced this week.

"The 7-year-olds once again cited the word's versatility, its utility and its sheer elegance," said Francis Rothchild of Edelman Public Relations in a written statement. "It works as a noun, a verb, an adjective and, of course, an interjection. It's a classic of the genre."

Prominent 7-year-old Kevin Marples concurred with Rothchild, saying, "He's a poop! I have to poop! Poop poop poop!" This prompted his friends Dylan Cranmore, 7, and Trevor Mankiewicz, also 7, to fall on the floor laughing, as Mankiewicz expelled milk from his nose.

A close second on this year's list was "butt," which is also "a perennial favorite," said Rothchild. "It's awash in descriptive significance," he said.

"And it's where the poop comes out of," said Marples, adding, "Poop!"

As usual, several controversial choices also made the list of 7-year-olds' most popular words, including "stupid" (as in, "my sister is stupid"), "hate" ("I hate my sister") and "kill" ("I'm going to kill my sister"), leading to some protests from concerned mothers.

"There are far more productive words our 7-year-old boys could be using," said Darlene Fortenski of Mothers Against Everything (MAE). "Words like 'please' and 'polite' and 'good choices.'"

"I hate stupid poop good choices," responded Marples.

Fortenski noted that words like "stupid" are "gateway words" leading eventually to much harsher language. As evidence she cites this year's Word of the Year for 13-year-olds, "retarded" (with "gay" coming in a close second, as in, "Are you retarded? That's so gay.") and the seven top words chosen by 18-year-olds, which are all unprintable here.

The nation's 7-year-old girls, meanwhile, are expected to release their Word of the Year next week. Rumored contenders include "gross" and "ew!," particularly in reference to 7-year-old boys.

SATIRE

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Dept Of Veteran's Affairs to pay benefits to thousands of Vietnam War veterans who may have been exposed to Jane Fonda in the early '70s «» Massachusetts woman accused of forcing elderly mother to commute with her to and from work in order to drive in HOV lane «» World Trade Organization approves putting 'Country Of Origin' labels on immigrants coming into the US to help Americans better target their discrimination «» America's homophobes lobby in favor of gay marriage to "keep them off the streets" and protect the sanctity of the bar scene for straight men «» Protesters in Baltimore are congratulating themselves on "a job well done" and say Freddie Gray would have wanted nothing more than for them to destroy their hometown and all get arrested «» After avoiding jail for sharing state secrets with his mistress biographer, David Petraeus said if he had to do it all over again, he would because "the sex was really, really good" «» New York City vows to reduce its output of white trash by 90% over next 10 years, promises better class of resident "to make country proud" «» Utah becomes first state to offer stoning as death penalty option, saying it's a criminal's right to have their head bashed in «» General Mills announces plans to discontinue its new cereal Diabeteos, acknowledges that the sugar content may be "a little high" «» Society For Gay Racists up in arms over typo that has South Carolina calling for removal of the state's confederate fag «»