Wednesday, November 26, 2014

From Dolly’s Creek last week to Devil’s Kitchen, to
begin the Cluster Fuck 1000 weekend,
a camping extravaganza in the bush to celebrate the alignment of the stars; Rowdy, Mountie and Pus Bucket all reaching
their milestones of 1000 (or 17) runs with Ballarat Sovereign Hash and an acknowledgment
of the rarity of up to 6 hashers proudly doing same within a 12 month period.

Mountie was accommodated with a quickie in the Kitchen on
the Sunday for Run 1692 to reach her 999th.Accompanied by a tight pack, the short root
was over almost before it started but was fun with plenty of scratches to show from
scrub bashing and creek crossing by a live hare desperate to retain liberty,
dignity and his shorts.As it turned
out, MastaBait led most astray up a
grey shaley mullock dump.He only went
up there for a joke so he got a joke, from Bent
Nose, about General Cluster fucking millions of Injuns.

On Befores in the shade with beer, bickies and
cheese along with forays to find the vantage point of the photographer that
snapped the historic Try Again Mine in the Devil’s Kitchen in the early 1920’s.On Afters back at the Happy Valley Hall and a
BBQ to enjoy Half a Steak more than
Half cooked by Half a Bar with more
than Half a Beer to warm up for the
Monday night to follow.

To settle the dust, one and a Half inches of rain was arranged for Monday. Trail was set in the
mud of the Mount, Erip that is. As the
sun broke through, the Wood-fired Pizza people prepared and the Hash House Harriers
amassed.

Post precipitation participants were ferried to the
On On and they were Off Off. Up Up and Away Away climbing Mt Erip. A first for runners with a Thirst! Through Pristine Birgin Bush with the sweet
scent of wet eucalypt and offering views over the waters of the Woady Yalloak,
the River by which we partook of Drink Stop drinks.

From there the pre piss-up partiers were delivered
back to the historic Happy Valley Hall, the former School now community asset
and weekly church.

The Crowd cosied up inside around the fire thinking
life was like a box of chocolates when Bubba
and Forrest were warmly welcomed back.The Billy Goat blessed the three milestoners Mounty, Rowdy and Pus Bucket as they were called out for the front
for the first of many charges for their One Thousand (and 17) significant runs.
They were kept our for another Down Down with the Crew of +1000 runners that were
all proudly in attendance for the whorespicious occasion The Bill, SS, MastaBait, Bent Nose, Half a Bar, Spencer Hocking and BP.The three remained charged for the
screwing of the Run by The Bill and
the screwing of the Walk by SS, this
time joined by trail setting team.

Primed with snippets of Proclaimer’s “I Would Walk
500 Miles” music, Heavy’s screw Song
hit the spot, the mood and sentiment. It
was perfectly pitched even though the performance pitch wasn’t perfect with
everybody bellowing;

On a Monday, yeah, I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the hasher who runs up next to you
And when I go out, yeah, I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the Hasher who goes along with you

If I get drunk, yes I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the hasher who gets drunk next to you
And if I get pissed, yeah I know I'm gonna be
I'm gonna be the hasher who's getting pissed along with you

But I would do 500 runs
And I would do 500 more
Just to be the hasher who’s run one thousand runs
And fall down pissed on your kitchen floor

Sergeant Spencer
Hocking took charges from before the run, during the run, and from the floor.The pizzas started to pour through the door
but none got past our self-appointed pizza security sampler Silic who was willing to sacrifice himself
and ensure we were safe as he taste tested each and every one of them.

The 1000 runner’s recognition reigned supreme with
more presentations of the engraved perpetual trophy, The 1000 RUN Trumpet and
stand. Then Wine Goblets for the boys and a Gobble it for the girl.Wine charges aplenty. We forgot the Prick but
had more Port and Mountie (Not fucken Mounty) got Pathologist’s Blood Orange licker.