Griffen admits BNP "divided over Rihanna."

Nick Griffen, the leader of the British National Party has admitted that the party is “deeply divided” and “in crisis” following a meeting with members to decide the party’s official policy towards Barbadian pop star Rihanna Fenty.

Traditionally, the BNP takes an oppositional policy when faced with foreign nationals in the UK on the basis of economic and social protectionism. Indeed, appearing at a recent political blockade of the urban/hip hop section of HMV in Picadilly Circus, Mr Griffen had argued that by invading the UK charts with her non-British pop music, Rihanna "was stealing chart positions from genuine British artists" such as BNP favourite Cheryl Tweedy.

Yet rumours have circulated that several party members have refused to tow the line culminating in reports that some influential members missed the weekly darts tournament to watch Saturday’s “X Factor” which featured Miss Fenty. This was strongly denied by Mr Griffen, who said that those missing had attended a gypsy stoning.

However, it has emerged that Griffen, evoking the spirit of Norman Tebbitt, demanded members state “whether the Rihanna was fitter than Cheryl Tweedy”, with half of the members admitting that were willing to “reject their hitherto staunch opposition to non-Brits on the basis of Rihanna’s thighs.”

Outside their Regional HQ at the Burnley Working Men’s Club, Mr Griffen spoke of his dismay:

“This is yet another example of someone of colour, coming into this country and stealing all the talent. Looking at the men in that room, I can tell you that up and down the country their will be a lot of disappointed women who will be feeling let down by the same people who are meant to be protecting our gene pool. I really thought we’d cracked it when we saw off Beyonce.”

The BNP now faces an uncertain future and there is a genuine risk that the party might split resulting in legions of disenfranchised racists. Mr Griffen has urged members of the party to “embrace Cheryl Tweedy or risk political oblivion” and went on to warn that “soon we may no longer be trusted by the honest White Man because he will see us as a party which clearly accept blacks, even if is just when it suits us. And in that case, he might as well join the Conservatives.”

Cheers, I thought your iphone sub was a certainty! The tag reveals the real reason for the sub, it was all just a pretence to allow me to think of Rihanna without feeling like a teenager, and to justify hours of research via google images/youtube.