God Created heaven and the earth. Quickly he was
faced with a class action suit for failure to file an environmental impact
statement. He was granted a temporary permit for the project, but was stymied
with the cease and desist order for the earthly part.

Appearing at the hearing, God was asked why he
began his earthly project in the first place. He replied that he just liked
to be creative.

Then God said, "Let there be light,"
and immediately the officials demanded to know how the light would be made.
Would there be strip mining? What about thermal pollution? God explained
that the light would come from a huge ball of fire. God was granted provisional
permission to make light, assuming that no smoke would result from the
ball of fire: that he would obtain a building permit; and to conserve energy,
would have the light out half the time. God agreed and said he would call
the light "Day" and the darkness "Night." Officials
replied that they were not interested in semantics.

God said "Let the earth bring forth green
herb and such as many seed." The EPA agreed so long as native seed
was used. Then God said, "Let the waters bring forth creeping creatures
having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth." Officials
pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated
with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.

Everything was O.K. until God said he wanted to
complete the project in Six days. Officials said it would take at least
200 days to review the application and impact statement. After that there
would be a public hearing. Then there would be 10-12 months before. . .