Post by DetroitSteve on Jun 18, 2004 10:15:37 GMT -5

OK, I deleted all of my posts and will close with this.

Let me give you some insight on why I take this so personally. This is not a request for sympathy so please skip it, but a way of letting you know why I think this is SO inappropriate and disrespectful.

On June 1, 2004 just before we left, an old friend of mine passed away in WA. we went to high school together in MI and I haven't seen him but a few times over the last ten years. Ryan had struggled on and off with heroine in his life and had been in rehab many times. Well, after he passed, rumors were rampant that he had OD'd.

Well, I live in a fairly affluent suburb where a parent might have a hard time admitting that their kid is an addict, not my kid right? So when the death notice was printed in the paper and it said only that "Ryan passed peacefully in his sleep" the rumors and hearsay swirled even faster.

Being a small community, virtually everyone believed that Ryan died from H. So much so that my own mother who lives in FL asked me if this was the case. How the H*ll does something like that get that far?

Anyway, I struggled with the decision to skip Bonnaroo and go to Ryan's funeral or to go. I did what I think he would have wanted me to and went.

A friend of mine who was at the funeral filled me in on the rest of the story. His family (younger sisters) had heard this rumor so many times that his father had to use half of the tear filled eulogy explaining that Ryan had been clean of heroine for over two years and was one semester from completing his Bachelors degree at Western Washington U. He further explained that Ryan had died from a broken blood vessel in his brain.

So, what are people remembering about Ryan? His laughter, caring, willingness to do anything for anyone, his intelligence? Or are they remembering a ficticious rumor? What is his legacy?

Why, at their lowest point, should his family have to consider the above questions?

I have lost many close to me for various reasons. And even if they got little respect in life, the deserve it in death.

I hope you never have to run rumor control for your family or friend. I truly do.