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Feeling so sad about weaning

My "baby" is almost three and a half years old, but here I am crying over the end of our breastfeeding relationship! I have never posted in the forums, but have read them many times since his birth.

I had read so many stories of how weaning happened because over the years, it seemed like he would NEVER wean. Only my husband knew how he breastfed every few hours in the night and then several times during the day! If people asked, I would say "Oh, just a few times now..."

Around the time he turned three a few months ago, the dentist found a small cavity in his back teeth. I did not tell the dentist he was still night feeding! (Are you giving him milk before he goes to bed? Oh, no Mr Dentist, I never) I night weaned him and drastically cut down the day nursing and it was very hard for the two of us. Ironically, I didn't really feel more rested during the day.

A week ago, I broke him off early (as I usually had to do) and told him to "save it for later". He seemed intrigued. That night, he barely nursed and told me he was "saving it for tomorrow". The next few days, he did the same thing. I couldn't get him to nurse! I reminded him that if he saved it for tomorrow too much the milk was going to go away. He said "No, I like to save it for later". A few times he did nurse, but mostly he didn't.

And, so -- that is how it ended for us! I never expected to breastfeed this long. In fact, I was so ignorant I thought infants only needed milk for the first few months. We had such a rocky start, I felt lucky to breastfeed him for a month, never mind for over three years. The saddest part for me, is that it ended so quickly, I can't even remember really the "last" time. Also, strangely I feel just so sad about it ending considering how much I've complained to my husband about how much I've hated nursing!

Re: Feeling so sad about weaning

Mama, welcome to the forum and congratulations on making it to this milestone! I can completely understand how bittersweet (maybe more bitter than sweet?) it is when your nursing relationship ends so abruptly. I think we all have dreams of how breastfeeding is going to go... And then our children up-end them completely! We think we're going to hate it, and we end up loving it, or we think it will be easy and it ends up being really hard, or we think we'll do it for a few weeks/months and end up going on with it for years.