Courtship

A reader asks, "How and when do you embrace the special girl in your adult son's life? My son is 20 and this is his first "girlfriend". They've been developing this relationship for 4 months and it seems serious. We have her over periodically but don't know when to take that next step." (more…)

We were very surprised to find that many parents who are teaching courtship to their children are expecting (and telling their children!) that there will only be one suitor in their future. We see some real problems with this. Imagine this: Marc has a female friend he's known for years. Recently, he's begun to realize what…

We've said some critical things about the way the courtship model is sometimes carried out, but one really good thing that has come out of it is the recognition that courtship and marriage involves more than two people, it involves two families. We're always amused when we hear someone say, "I'm marrying her, not her family," because…

"Hey, I've got some unexpected time free. Want to meet for coffee?" an adult young man texts an adult female friend. "I'm not comfortable meeting guys like that. You need to talk to my father," is the reply. These two are on a different wavelength. Let's peek into their heads for a moment. (No, we…

Nearly thirty years ago, we had what was in many ways an unusual relationship compared to many of our friends. For us, it grew rather naturally from a friendship between two people who were rather analytical about things—even affairs of the heart. But we’re getting ahead of our story. When it comes to marriage or…

Lately, I've been noticing a phenomenon among our acquaintances that really concerns me. Single ladies, we don't often address you on these pages, but this one's for you. Most of the young adults we know are very intentional about finding a mate in the right way. They are committed to waiting until they are ready…