If our policy is to avoid conflict at all cost, we may impede our growth by trying to sweep important issues under the rug and refusing to deal with them. The issues don’t disappear, however, and by sweeping them under the rug, we make them more toxic and unwieldy.

Conflict is bound to occur in any vital, important relationship, and the question is how to handle it. Allowing conflict to be brought into the open usually makes it much more manageable than trying to ignore it. If there’s fear of conflict, we’re less likely to feel free to be ourselves.

When I am willing to talk about what’s bothering me, to state my position and listen to yours, to ask for help from a Higher Power, it’s very possible that we will reach an understanding that enhances our relationship. Conflict does not need to destroy. Using the Steps, we can build on our differences and both come out stronger.

If I find myself in a situation of conflict today, I will try working through it rather than attempting to avoid it.