Underneath all the malfunctioning capes, layers of make up, and - has to be said - MAHOOSIVE SHOES, Madonna is a mum. She is - contrary to some myths - human. She has just undergone a trauma that all parents dread, and yet you're meant to welcome it because it means you've done your job. Your little fledgling is flying the nest. You're meant to smile, and say you're very proud, because you are, but it also means a little part of you is breaking away.

It's like one of the final scenes in Toy Story 3, when Andy's mum goes into his empty room, wells up, and says "I just always wish I could be with you"... I look at the 2-year-old and try appreciate her constant sickness, her perma-snotty nose, and her 4:30am calls for "MAAAAHMEEEE" because one day - if we're really lucky - she'll she flying the nest. DREAD. And joy, because she's made it. Apologies, fierce tired and a bit emotional today *dabs face*

Failed to load widget object.

Hey, it's weight off to get that whole BRITS palaver cleared up, wha'? As for her shoes, did you own a pair circa '92? I did (helped with the long flares), not sure I'd be resurrecting them in a hurry mind - going over on your heel is hellish.