Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Whatever you do... DON'T name it.

It's starting to look less likely that I got the teaching job that I wanted very badly. I even put on my fancy suit and put product in my hair and spoke articulately and passionately and thoughtfully and I limited myself to one swear word per sentence. Perhaps I'll start a new life. Ideally it would be in a galaxy far, far away. It's all just too much to think about.

With Penny hitting me in the back of the head with a shovel it's been hard to get my mind clear enough to make any decisions.

What do I do with this little black Chihuahua pup that my dogs found hiding behind the recycle bins? He's here and he's offering me 6lbs and 2 ounces of unconditional love but 3 dogs without a yard for them to romp in is difficult and my dogs get a bit jealous and depressed if they don't get enough attention. It's easy to juggle two balls but three takes some effort. I'm leaning towards giving him away but right now I need all the friends I can find. I really want to give him away if it's a friend or somebody where I can visit him. He's a cool little dude, good personality, likes to cuddle. I think I made the crucial mistake of naming him. You'd think I would've learned my lesson about forming attachments but I still went ahead and named him 8-ball.

I know exactly just how he feels.

He's adjusting fairly well considering the recent traumatic experience of being abandoned by the people he loves and becoming lost in a big strange world.

Fortunately little 8-ball is adapting to his new situation even better than I am.

Yeah, come Down Under and see if your luck changes! (No innuendo there, please - do you think we haven't heard them all?)

You can have a Spa Party and see if anything comes up. (Innuendo permitted there.)

You have so many Aussie friends (as Random Australian - close relative of Random Task from Austin Powers - pointed out), that you certainly won't be lonely down here.

And you can play a game we like to play down here but don't usually tell Americans about: Prank call a bomb theat in to an American airport!

It's a classic. You just mix yourself a drink, make the phone call, sit back, watch the overnight news, and laugh yourself silly! You'll love it.

PS - Sneak the dog on your flight in your carry-on luggage, wait until take off, then pretend to 'find' it in the pocket of the seat in front of you. Demand to know what the steward's going to do about it.

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About Me

I can catch flies with my bare hands.
I like Mint Chip ice cream.
I was expelled from Nursery School.
I like people that like me.
If we were in prison together I would be the guy to talk to about procuring things.
My favorite words are cumshaw, fustigate and girth.