Some Serious Happiness

Cross the Streams, Already

I am a nerd.

You will never insult me by calling me a nerd, because that’s exactly what I am. I came to grips with my nerdiness decades ago. For a season, I tried to disguise it because I thought I needed to be cool. But by the time I had kids, I came to the conclusion that you can’t be a dad and be cool. That’s when I embraced my inner geekiness and made it my outer geekiness. Life is much easier that way.

My kids know what a nerd I am. In fact, they are the ones responsible for every Star Trek, Star Wars, Marvel, and DC article of clothing I own. And I don’t just own them. I wear them like a boss.

My kids have also exposed me to many of my favorite things. Parks and Recreation comes immediately to mind. There was one episode in which Patton Oswalt was a guest star. In this episode, he filibustered the Pawnee City Council. Don’t ask me why I was listening to him in the background over the dialog in the foreground, but I was. And he set my Nerdometer off. He suggested a Star Wars/Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) crossover.

I know. I know. It will never happen. Nor should it. As I learned long ago, you should never cross the streams. But what if?

Humor me for a moment.

Disney owns Star Wars and the MCU. This could actually happen in real life. Starting with Oswalt’s original premise, let’s go from there.

Rey and Luke discover an infinity stone.

See?

As they begin to discover and unlock the power of the infinity stone, Kylo Ren begins a hunt to destroy them and take the stone. Meanwhile, the stone’s power works as a beacon for Thanos, who, in order to obtain all the stones for the Infinity Gauntlet, has to fight a four front war for the stones. Front one is with Kylo Ren and the First Order forces. Front two is with the last of the Jedi and Rebel forces who have teamed up with the Guardians of the Galaxy and Nova Corps. Front three is with the heroes of Asgard. Thor, Volstag, Hogun, Fandral, the Lady Sif, Heimdall, and even Loki lead the armies of Asgard into this cosmic battle. Front four is with the heroes of earth: the Avengers, the Defenders, the Inhumans, Shield, Doctor Strange, Spider-Man, and Ant Man fight to save the planet. I would include the X-Men and Fantastic Four, but they are not MCU properties.