The Helping Field

I
took my first job working with people right around age 20. I was
terrified when someone suggested it to me, as the job would be
helping individuals with physical and mental challenges. The first
company I worked for the disabilities were severe and there was a lot
of physical agility involved. Though I grew to love helping others, I
did not enjoy the physical strain it was putting on my body often
taking individuals from wheelchair to chair and then from wheelchair
to and from bed.

The
second job I had working with people was ultimately the best when it
came down to working with individuals with disabilities. The company
was set up very well structurally and proved to the people and the
community that they truly valued the lives in their care. Had I been
older and not had a very young child, I may have retired from this
company they were so good. The next company was a royal nightmare.
They had the individuals packed in what they called ďcottagesĒ
and this only created the environment for constant behaviors and
tension. There was a lot of ďmimickingĒ that took place
as well with the youngest of the children.

I
was given my first supervisory role as Cottage Coordinator. I had 11
young men from ages 5 to 13 I believe as well as 14-20 staff.
Responsible for day to day programming, inventory, staff training and
discipline, as well as meal planning and direct care; striving to
make a life of normalcy for those children became my ultimate goal.
On one hand the children received my love so well, my staff would
often joke that I was pinching them in private. Staff would report to
me that when the boys saw me coming they would sit like ducks in a
row. Though the children suffered from various mental and physical
limitations, they were just as lively, fun, and creative as any other
child.

I
had the best first shift; they would have those young men up,
dressed, and fed for that bus every morning with little to no
oversight. They treated the boys as their own and it showed. Second
shift however, was polar opposite. Second shift pretty much consisted
of younger staff who was more preoccupied in sitting together
discussing their personal lives than providing quality care and
supervision for the boys. It was this shift that helped me to develop
my disciplinary skills. I remember terminating a staff found guilty
of pinching one of the boys and leaving marks. She came back to the
job at the end of my shift in an attempt to fight me. I wanted out
the door so bad; however, my staff would not allow me to jeopardize
my job like that.

I
fought with the direct care staff and management to make sure those
young boys were treated like and looked like any other child. I
showed the staff how to divide and conquer and engage them in
activities that helped their development not kept them busy. I
purchased clothing, shoes, food, and bedding for the boys out of my
own money my entire time as a Cottage Coordinator. I ultimately
worked with the medical team to get medications discontinued or
decreased in order to give the boys optimum growth opportunities.
This is where it all cost me my job. What I didnít recognize at
the time (and it wouldnít have made a hill of beans) was that
each medication supported a diagnosis and when they lost the
diagnosis their checks were lowered, costing the company money. It
wasnít very long after that they fired me for talking down on
the company with another employee.

It
was at that point when I made college a priority. I had to reduce the
overhead staff so less people could stop me from doing everything I
could to help others. While working on my Associates degree, I took
on home health jobs as an aide. I would help prepare dinner, clean,
and sometimes do some personal care for the individuals in their
home. I was asked not to report back to a woman for making her bed
the wrong way that tickled my soul. I had so many residents asked me
to work for them directly that it made things very difficult. One
lady could not afford to keep paying the agency and I agreed to stop
by and do things for her on my own. The company found out and I was
terminated. That wouldnít be the last time I jeopardized my job
for the sake of others in my care.

After
the youth, I went to do activities at a couple nursing homes. At one
nursing home I worked on the critical care unit where most patients
were either vent or tracheal patients and most were terminal. I was
reprimanded for spending too much time with my patients. That floored
me. I couldnít change who I am so I started going in before my
shift and staying after my shift to spend time with my dying
patients. I would do everything from rubbing patientís feet
with lotion, to playing soothing music, as well as providing sensory
and auditory connections, and even feeding sips of Pepsi to a special
lady dying from ovarian cancer. I knew what every sip of that Pepsi
meant to her. Not sure how I left that job, but Iím sure I quit
due to the same stipulations I mentioned before.

The
next nursing home I went to do activities, I was told after they
hired me that they almost did not hire me due to the braids in my
hair and the ignorant stigma behind African American hairstyles. The
nursing home was horrible and many residents begged me daily to take
them home with me. I cried to the administration to no avail. The
infractions were so severe that I had to call them in to department
of public health multiple times. They were ultimately shut down and
that was the best thing that could have ever happened. The place was
renamed twice I believe before the building was eventually
demolished.

I
landed a job in a call center and was there until I left to work for
a 24 hour residential treatment facility for adolescents. I was the
second shift Crisis Response Supervisor which was really code for the
lead fire fighter. The culture upon my arrival was basically catch,
confront, restrain, and report. The boys were getting stronger from
each restraint and the girls saw it as a way to challenge the
typically young, female staff. The violence and staff injury ratio
was quite high and I was in no mood to sustain an injury on the job.
Shortly after I started this job, I left a relationship of six years
after things just werenít connecting between us and she met
someone else. I poured myself into my work and an overnight
supervisor!!

Following
the same protocol I did working with developmentally disabled youth,
I challenged the youth to acknowledge the emotions behind the
behaviors and learn to explain and explore with less aggressive
results. I did a lot of therapeutic walks and self awareness
activities. The staff often challenged me for not being so quick to
do those ineffective restraints every single shift. However, whenever
it was deemed necessary, I ensured all staff felt important, valued,
and protected. We would remain after the shift and debrief whenever
the night was rough, which was quite frequently there. I ultimately
ended up calling the news after reporting all the way up the chain of
command and even to DCFS about staff molesting the youth, sending
them to steal, allowing the boys to have sex with the girls, and many
other unsafe practices. DCFS decided to cover their own asses and
close the facility down rather than work to correct the infractions.
Many of the youth were released to the streets with little to no
direction.

My
next role in the helping field was a Foster Care Case Aide. With this
job I transported children from their foster homes to visits with
their parents either at the office or in the parentsí home.
Most of this job was fairly easy and gave me time to work on my
course work once I started my Bachelorís program. I would have
foster children ask me if they could just hang with me rather than go
see their parent and others that I would transport hours away to a
prison only to find out for whatever reason the visit couldnít
occur. To see those children crying and breaking down for that bond
with mom/dad was heartbreaking at times. When I saw the Case Manager
side of the job, I knew I did not want to stay in the field. Going to
court against parents and making decisions that serious for
childrenís lives was just too much for me. Know your limits.

After
getting my Bachelorís degree, the supervisor I had at the time
was not giving me my one dollar whopping raise that I was entitled to
after achieving my Bachelorís Degree. The supervisor of the
crisis nursery found out I was displeased and offered me a position
at the crisis nursery. This was the best job of my life. Intake,
direct care, curriculum implementation, community service, and
parenting classes; I truly would have been at this job for years and
years had it not been for my son needing over five thousand in
tuition monies to go to college even after receiving several
scholarships. So I left the crisis nursery and returned to nursing
home care as the pay is double that of pay working with children. The
notion of paying more for elderly than children is totally backwards
thinking in my mind.

My
first title back in the nursing home field was that of Behavioral
Health Counselor. I was assigned to the females unit but asked to
switch to the males when a new counselor came on. I held individual
and group sessions for the residents as well as getting them
connected to other necessary resources. Once again, I realized how
people were over medicated and failing to thrive beyond the
containment of the unit. I started helping some of the individuals
work towards discharge to a more apartment or group home like
setting. I wasnít on this unit very long because when I would
need to go off the unit into the long term care area, I always
stopped to converse and help those residents where I could. I never
made it as though I could only serve the residents on my unit as I
love helping people. I still recall when they came to get me for the
interview; I was engulfed in a conversation with one of the residents
that just happened to be sitting up front. The lady who was the
Director of Social Services for long term used to pick on me all the
time. I truly became bothered by it after some time and made an
attempt to report her to the administrator who just laughed it off. I
told that Social Service Director I would have her job and when she
announced that she was leaving to go and care for her sick dad, the
administrator offered me the position and I gladly accepted.

You
could say I was truly in my element. It was almost as much so as when
I worked at the crisis nursery. I had close to 200 residents and I
made it my priority to get to know each and every one as well as
their families or lack of. My residents made my days as bright as
they say I made theirs. They made me things and tried to buy me
things and really made it hard for people to figure out that I was
staff and not family. I would help out in activities, housekeeping,
laundry, and dietary. Whatever was going to help the residents and
the people that took the best care of them, I was willing to do
without being asked. I came early and stayed late and loved every
minute of it.

New
administration came in and things that were crucial started being cut
or sacrificed to save the budget. Smaller cups and less time led to
residents not getting water and an up rise in UTIís. Short
staffing led to an absence of shower and patient care that needed to
be done. There were times I had to close doors or pull curtains and
do bed baths and feedings otherwise those residents would not have
eaten. Medication errors, unreported injuries, staff stealing from
residents, it became overwhelming. The administration had zero
compassion for people and it showed. I was completing my Masterís
degree and had decided when I was done I would resign. I contacted
the department of public health multiple times but the facility had a
way, as most do, of knowing just what to do and say to get out of the
fines and remain open. The truth of the matter is there arenít
enough places to put the people for public health to even begin to
truthfully address the amount of elder abuse happening in these
nursing homes.

I
started a STARS program to reward the staff that went above and
beyond, giving them $5 gift cards out of my own money. I would order
food for the children of staff willing to come in or stay over when
we were short staffed. I bought phones and chargers for residents
after staff would steal theirs. I would have to go outside and walk
for minutes at a time and even started smoking cigarettes to avoid
becoming physical with some of the pathetic nursing and
administrative staff in that nursing home. I knew it was time for me
to move on before I became the bad guy. Due to an online relationship
progressing, I gave my thirty day notice and left the company and
state.

I
left Rockford for a short time before returning and eventually
landing a job at a nursing facility as a Psych Rehab Director. The
lower level of the home was designated for the elderly and the upper
level was where the residents with psychological challenges were
housed. As the Psych Rehab Director I was responsible for a team of
10 or 12 as well as the offenderís list, intake and discharge,
and upholding the facility policies and procedures. The facility was
very ill managed and many of the staff were former felons and not
properly trained or disciplined. The infractions were many but the
pay was great. After the fall I took moving to Missouri for love, I
needed this leg up financially and so I tried to ďgo along to
get along.Ē As with many positions, I went above and beyond and
was told they never saw the previous Director so present. In time, I
realized why that was not the best decision. My last day worked there
was the day I was trying to uphold the no smoking in the room policy
with a large African American male who was mixing street drugs with
alcohol and not taking his psychotropic medications. This man became
upset with me and walked behind me out of his room and to the nurseís
station. He hit me in my head so hard that the emergency room doctor
told me it was within inches of my occipital nerve; which would have
ultimately blinded me. I asked the facility to have him arrested and
removed and they refused. The unemployment officer was so irate that
she attacked them the entire call for not putting measures in place
to ensure my safety as well as the safety of others and that was the
first time in life that I was able to get unemployment.

Again,
I lost all hope in Rockford and this time I moved to Nashville,
Tennessee with my mother. Here, I landed a job as a Program
Coordinator at an African American Medical College. I was in charge
of recruiting, enrolling, and sustaining clients in a psycho social
program designed to help those who were HIV positive and/or high risk
for the virus. The program required a six to eight week commitment
with weekly visits. I was the only one in the Middle Tennessee area
that was able to successfully enroll and complete the required number
of participants mandated in the grant. United Way told me that they
pulled the grant from everyone but me. I was able to organize and
implement a webinar on recruitment and retention as well as traveled
to California several times to present as an adjunct facilitator.
When the infectious disease doctor learned of my accomplishments he
brought me on in his clinic to conduct surveys with participants to
determine what caused them to drop out of care. I was able to
complete the 100 participant requirement for the study, within the
allotted time to do so. I was told I would get honorable mention in a
scholarly article but have yet to hear anything more about it. I left
the college after I was lied to about a raise I was to get for all
the additional duties. I was not able to live on that salary in
Nashville and Iím not sure how anyone could.

After
working a few months at a treatment center in Los Angeles and
returning to Nashville to drive for Nissan (which I loved so much,
minus the weather), I landed a job as a Resident Services Coordinator
at a low income high rise on the east side of Nashville. From the
start, I fell into my role head first; building relationships,
getting needs met and services in place, and making sure the
residents were in the best care possible. I saw so many infractions
by the maintenance and property management it was almost as bad as
the nursing homes. It all came to a head for me there and ultimately
led to a slight nervous breakdown when the property was flooded with
septic sewage all over the carpets, ceilings, etc. The property
wanted to spare the money and put the hundreds of residents, and
staff at risk. My co-worker resigned immediately and I tried to stay
the course and see it through. After getting zero support from my
supervision team I went to see a therapist and never returned to that
role.

Made
it back to Rockford before losing my entire mind, and after months of
awaiting a back ground clearance, I began my position as an Early
Head Start Home Visitor teacher. Working with prenatal moms and
children birth to three is a dream come true. It is my ultimate dream
job, being able to do more than just teach the children or counsel
the parents. In this role I get to do it all. I help families connect
to resources, address their personal afflictions, create stronger
bonds between parent/child, introduce age appropriate activities for
parent and child to increase growth and development, support parents
in being the childís first teacher and advocate, complete
referrals for specialized services, complete developmental screening,
and parent teacher conferences, and outright love on babies. It is a
dream come true after all Iíve cycled through. We are currently
under lockdown in my state due to COVID-19 and it has truly affected
my mental health not being able to get to those babies and interact.
I truly love helping others.

My
name is Facerlyn LaShawn Wheeler.I am 45 year old African
American
female born and raised in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. My mother was
married when she slept with my father and therefore has not given me
any information as to whommy father is. I have 5 siblings,
2 older
than me and 3 younger than me. My mother was in and out of abusive
relationships and married nine times which left me alone a lot. I did
everything developmentally at an early age and my grandmother would
often say I had been here before or that I had an old soul. 2 out of
3 of my brothers have a diagnosis of schizophrenia and all of us
girls have some sort of mental health diagnosis as well. My mother
was an undiagnosed and untreated mental health crisis all in one. I
have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Severe
Depression, and most recently; Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. At the
age of 13, I began isolating and by age 16 I was sent to an inpatient
program which ultimately saved my life. At 17 I became pregnant and
refused to have the abortion my mom insisted on so I was dropped on
the father of my childís doorstep. He turned to drugs and I
became a single mother and lesbian. Growing up as a single mother who
was also a masculine lesbian led to a lot of drama, conflict,
violence, anxiety, and depressing situations. I struggled with
homelessness, cannabis abuse, and panic attacks. I was told several
times to give up the fight, move into housing, draw disability, and
take the easy road. My God said no and I lived to be a blessing and
beacon of light to others. It hasnít been easy but Iím
still here and despite all the oppression and obstacles, Iíve
managed to earn 3 degrees, several awards, leadership roles,
outstanding performance reviews and a wave of good emotions.