I thought it would be funny to start a thread with harmless things you do that make you feel like a "bad mommy" or daddy, parent, etc.

For example... at our first dr visit after the hospital, the nurse asked for baby to be in just a diaper for weight check. No problem. Then she told us we could wrap him in a blanket until the doctor came in. Never even thought to grab a blanket... in February!

Yesterday, we were gone from home for a few hours and en route to our desination I realized I had no diapers in the diaper bag!

Nate leaves the house at 5:00 in the morning on Thursdays and Fridays for work, so I'm alone with the kid until 8:00 when his mom comes over to relieve me so I can go to work. Ezra gets to watch so much freggin tv in those early morning hours (well, we normally get up at 6, so it's only two hours... can I say "only"?) in order for me to get in and out of the shower, get dressed, and get something in me that somewhat resembles breakfast.

Whenever the end of the week comes up, I just cringe. Ezra looks forward to it so bad. He gets his fancy teacup full of banana slices, cup of soymilk, and completely zones out in front of that television. It kills me every time, but I have to get ready somehow.

At Scarlett's first check-up, I stood up when her name was called and just at that moment she pooped and her diaper basically exploded all over me. The nurse said something about how she's never seen cloth diapers before, with a look on her face like we had single handedly made her decide that they don't work. She left us in the exam room to get cleaned up, and we discovered that we forgot to bring wipes. The nurse came back in just as I was holding Scarlett over the hand washing sink, washing her butt off, while my partner waited to catch her in a pile of paper towels. I was like, "Uh, we're new at this..." and the nurse made a comment about how she understood, she sees a lot of teenage parents who do things like forget wipes and don't know how to use diapers correctly. Um, yeah, we're not teenagers, I guess we're just inept! We thought it was pretty funny, though.

At Scarlett's first check-up, I stood up when her name was called and just at that moment she pooped and her diaper basically exploded all over me. The nurse said something about how she's never seen cloth diapers before, with a look on her face like we had single handedly made her decide that they don't work. She left us in the exam room to get cleaned up, and we discovered that we forgot to bring wipes. The nurse came back in just as I was holding Scarlett over the hand washing sink, washing her butt off, while my partner waited to catch her in a pile of paper towels. I was like, "Uh, we're new at this..." and the nurse made a comment about how she understood, she sees a lot of teenage parents who do things like forget wipes and don't know how to use diapers correctly. Um, yeah, we're not teenagers, I guess we're just inept! We thought it was pretty funny, though.

5 minutes after reading this and I'm still chuckling out loud. Ehehehehe.

_________________http://sisterlegumes.com Vegans sisters, a city apart.Our baby looked like a bean, so now we are pro-life. And we don't eat beans. -Tofulish

At Scarlett's first check-up, I stood up when her name was called and just at that moment she pooped and her diaper basically exploded all over me. The nurse said something about how she's never seen cloth diapers before, with a look on her face like we had single handedly made her decide that they don't work. She left us in the exam room to get cleaned up, and we discovered that we forgot to bring wipes. The nurse came back in just as I was holding Scarlett over the hand washing sink, washing her butt off, while my partner waited to catch her in a pile of paper towels. I was like, "Uh, we're new at this..." and the nurse made a comment about how she understood, she sees a lot of teenage parents who do things like forget wipes and don't know how to use diapers correctly. Um, yeah, we're not teenagers, I guess we're just inept! We thought it was pretty funny, though.

5 minutes after reading this and I'm still chuckling out loud. Ehehehehe.

At Scarlett's first check-up, I stood up when her name was called and just at that moment she pooped and her diaper basically exploded all over me. The nurse said something about how she's never seen cloth diapers before, with a look on her face like we had single handedly made her decide that they don't work. She left us in the exam room to get cleaned up, and we discovered that we forgot to bring wipes. The nurse came back in just as I was holding Scarlett over the hand washing sink, washing her butt off, while my partner waited to catch her in a pile of paper towels. I was like, "Uh, we're new at this..." and the nurse made a comment about how she understood, she sees a lot of teenage parents who do things like forget wipes and don't know how to use diapers correctly. Um, yeah, we're not teenagers, I guess we're just inept! We thought it was pretty funny, though.

We've all had moments like these. The nurse sounds uptight.

_________________Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. Buddha

It was back to school night at my son's school and Macaroni was still potty-training. I didn't think to make her go before we went in. I allowed big brother to take her outside to the playground where the other kids were. Apparently, she pulled down her pants in the middle of the playground area and started to go but being like 2 got pee all over herself. In the middle of the teacher's presentation, Son brings her in with pee literally dripping from her and parades her in front of the classroom where she proclaims that she had to go. And, of course, I didn't have a change of clothes with me.

For me, it was not funny. Since I was a younger mother with my first, I've always gotten a lot of negative judgment and negative attitudes from other parents so I was really mortified about the incident.

And then there was the time my Son got into trouble for saying he was wearing a "wife-beater" meaning a white tank-top. I don't even use that term (and think it's awful) but he picked it up from my (then) teenage brother. Yea, trying to explain that one at the uppity Montessori school was unpleasant.

_________________Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. Buddha

Last edited by MomMeTrois on Fri Jul 27, 2012 5:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Soooo we're using disposable diapers while on vacation. I'm not used to using them and having to remember to buy more. I thought I had some in one pocket of my suitcase and discovered in fact I was all out... First thing in the morning, when I went to get one to change baby's massively full diaper. Okay, that's fine. My in-laws weren't up yet and I don't drive. I had one pull-up (the Emperor just stopped wearing them to bed) in a giant size and wasn't sure whether I should put that on him in the interim or not, so I decided to drink a cup of coffee and then decide.

About two sips into my cup of coffee, the Magician pooped. His first poop for two days. It was massive. And due to the already full nature of the diaper, it exploded all over him and me. Hooo boy.

I hosed him down and put him in the pull up. The whole thing was gross but funny in hindsight!

So, I've forgotten wipes, forgotten diapers, forgotten a blanket for my newborn at her first checkup, let my kid watch way too much tv to get ready/make dinner/feed the baby, etc., let both kids fall off a couch at very young ages, bribed my kid with chocolate, fed the kid cereal for dinner when I was lazy, and much, much more. Oh, and I also swear a lot but didn't realize it until I heard Lucy, around 30 months, say to our dog who had pissed on the carpet, "Damnit Sparky. Bad dog!" I hereby declare myself the worst mommy in the world!

_________________It's not like I'm busting out my boobie tassles and shouting, "BEHOLD! THE MIRACLE OF LIFE!" - TheCrabbyCrafter

At the Emperor's first, solipsistnation and I couldn't figure out how to get him back into his pajamas. The doctor came back in to say something to us and just bust out laughing because here we were, two full grown adults who couldn't get a baby into a pair of footed pajamas.

I took the Magician to his first appointment (actually, maybe it was the second?) by myself. He was in the moby wrap. When I went to pull him out, I did t right under the light in the exam room... And bumped his tiny tiny head. He was fine but I was somewhat mortified. I didn't even have the I'm new at this excuse.

when taking wolverine home from the hospital we thought we knew how to use the carseat but aparently we didn't know how to loosen/tighten the straps. We put him in the car and couldn't figure how to get him in it and we were parked right in front of the hospital and there were people waiting to drive up. There was noone around to help us so we had to drive off and park somewhere to figure out how to strap the little guy in. I felt so irresponsable.

Most of the time I feel like I do a darn good job, but I have allowed my kid to roll off of furniture, let his stroller tip over while picking up dog poop (he scraped his head), and waited too long to lower the crib once he was standing and he tumbled out onto the floor head first. Good thing his skull's so thick!

Most of the time I feel like I do a darn good job, but I have allowed my kid to roll off of furniture, let his stroller tip over while picking up dog poop (he scraped his head), and waited too long to lower the crib once he was standing and he tumbled out onto the floor head first. Good thing his skull's so thick!

The dog poop made me laugh out loud, because I can totally see myself doing that!

I feel like I am such a slow learner. After we introduced food, I would go places and other moms would have food, and my kid would crawl over to them and beg to get a little snack too. I of course had nothing for her. Bad mommy!

_________________My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.

T, I STILL sometimes go out places without a snack for my kid. And you know that whenever we go to the park sans snack, because you know, he just ate a four course lunch or something... That's the day some other parent comes with a snack and the Emperor doesn't want to do anything other than hassle that parent about it.

oh my god, the food thing. my kid is ALWAYS begging for food off other moms. they always have snacks like goldfish and cheerios and raisins and sippy cups of juice. and i have... nothing. maybe a half a granola bar. it's pretty sad.

i've forgotten diapers plenty of times. once, hilariously, i had to borrow a diaper off a strange mom at the park because i let tzipi go in the splash pad before checking my bag, and of course, no extra and she was already soaked. i've had to run into the closest pharmacy to buy a whole pack of diapers and wipes because i brought no diapers out when meeting mr. bird for dinner, and tzipi chose that moment to have the biggest, grossest poop ever. and tzipi has worn a washcloth inside a cloth diaper cover cause i had no more prefolds. i forget wipes and have to make do with paper towels and napkins on a regular basis.

yeah, i dunno, i think parenting is fraught with moments of feeling like an idiot. poor planning seems to have a lot more bad consequences when you're dealing with a baby or kid. i mean, i've never been known for my forethought and planning skills and managed to survive without too much drama, but suddenly the addition of a baby makes my forgetfulness much more likely to end in disaster. and then there are the moments that even all the best planning in the world won't fix. anyone who judges a parent for looking disorganized or inept is kind of a crasshole.

Most of the time I feel like I do a darn good job, but I have allowed my kid to roll off of furniture, let his stroller tip over while picking up dog poop (he scraped his head), and waited too long to lower the crib once he was standing and he tumbled out onto the floor head first. Good thing his skull's so thick!

The dog poop made me laugh out loud, because I can totally see myself doing that!

Me too! I usually walk my dogs with Scarlett in the moby, and I'm always afraid I'm going to forget to hold her head in while I bend over to pick up poop and she's going to fall out.

"Mom (they always call you mom in the hospital), why are you worried about L's neck?""well, she managed to flip over her walker and I saw her land on her head."(this was maybe age 3, she had a therapeutic walker to help her try to train her legs. she was fine. no stairs, i swear she just somehow managed to flip the damn thing headfirst. For a child who couldn't walk she was really good at flipping over that damn walker.)

or bringing FC to the ER for a dislocated elbow, maybe age 2.5. She's shrieking in pain, and the people in the ER know me from my other daughter (who was in the ER at least monthly) and are all confused since i have the wrong kid. "So she can't move her elbow, mom? We call this nursemaid's elbow, it's usually from yanking a kid's arm. Did something like that happen?""Funny you should say that, she was fighting with her sister and her father had to pull her off."(she was fine, there's a special way to pop the elbow back in)

Or, since furbabies are babies too, having to bring the dog to the vet with what i thought was a concussion, she had a nosebleed and was all dopey."what happened to whippy?""she ran into a tree.""how did that happen?""we threw a ball and didn't expect it to hit the tree"(she was fine)

My most recent gaffe was a week or so ago when we were hiking in Colorado. She was on me in the mei tai, and I had my big SLR camera when we, along with a group of others spotted two moose by a mountain pond. Of course I started taking a hundred pictures of the moose as they started walking closer to me. They walked so close to me I had to back up and move away from them several times, but I was making an effort to get the best pics I could and was annoyed with baby for touching the camera.

Now, when people see the pictures, I feel guilty that I, the one with the baby strapped to her chest, was the closest person the the two wild animals. The pictures make it look really close! I wasn't thinking and my partner and my brother keep teasing me about it. They even kept more of a distance!

On the too close to nature front: the Emperor and I were picking blackberries the other day. The Magician was on my back, asleep in the Ergo. I was sort of capering to impress E, showing him that his clever short mother can still get berries up super high with a mix of using sticks and standing on tip toe.

M was only in a onesie, and I guess at some point I must have turned and scraped him on the bushes because when we got home, he had a bunch of little scratches on his leg. The crazy thing is: he didn't so much as whimper in his sleep! What the heck!

Now I can't take him out of the house without pants on til they're healed up.

I was playing with BG, him chasing me, and completely forgot he doesn't know how to cross roads safely yet. I checked for oncoming traffic before nipping across a quiet, residential sidestreet to hide from him behind a tree and saw him at the kerb before realizing what I'd done. I shouted "DON'T WALK IN THE ROAD" and he started to bawl his eyes out because I shouted at him, poor little guy. He was sad all afternoon because of that.