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Thursday, August 27, 2009

Choices

If I don't want to be a doormat, I have to get up off the floor. In others words, although I can't control what other people say, do or think, I am responsible for my choices. Looking back, I can accept that plenty of unacceptable behavior was directed at me, but I was the one who sat and took it and often came back for more. I was a willing participant in a dance that required two partners. I felt like a victim, but in many ways I was a volunteer. Today I know that I am not helpless. I have choices. When I get that old feeling that tells me I am a victim, I can regard it as a red flag, a warning that I may be participating (with my thoughts or my actions) in something that is not in my best interest. I can resist the temptation to blame others and look to my own involvement instead. That's where I can make changes.