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Friday, July 2, 2010

Your Underwear Is Now Smart

What do you do when you have invented everything worth inventing? Organs can now be harvested, crops genetically modified. Youth is just a scalpel away. Technology is your personal genie, everything material made available with just a flick of a button.

So does it mean that our Scientists and Researchers are sitting idle and vacationing in Honduras? Of course not! They are now fruitfully engaged in making cuddle sprays that make men feel like women. Conducting path breaking research on how cats react to various fragrances. Designing broadband connected bathtubs and mirrors that monitor your health. In future, you and your mirror will be engaged in meaningful conversations - Mirror, mirror on the dresser, is my cholesterol any lesser?

And now brace yourself for the latest breakthrough in the Scientific world. US scientists in response to growing need for wearable healthcare have designed smart briefs. These extra savvy briefs can measure your BP, heart rate and other vital signs via an electronic bio sensor in the waistband. Apart from life saving functions these underpants will have educational features too! Are Scientists conspiring to make Education a pants down affair? But hey look at the bright side. All along it was Superman flashing his red undies and now it is your turn to flash your super-undies.

Wait, it doesn’t stop here. This invention comes close on heels of “Grow your own rice bra” developed by Triumph International. This fun bra transforms into a rice growing kit and comes equipped with gardening gloves, a water hose as belt and recyclable plastic that double as cups. Females can now keep not just their cultural but agricultural pursuits close to their heart. Unfortunately all you budding farmers waiting to lay their hands on this rice-paddy will have to put your starchy dreams on a back burner- My Tanbo Bra (yes, this marvel has a name) is yet to be launched in the market.

Imagine your underwear beeping and buzzing in middle of business meetings, sprouting grass and generating enough heat to make you cringe. Why can’t our underwear do what it was originally intended to do instead of doubling up as our guardian angel and hobby kit? Ever single item we use has a dazzling array of features making us forget its original intent. A mobile is not just a phone but a multi tasking device that takes pictures, measures your BMI, lets you surf the net, watch movies and text mutilate English beyond recognition. A pad with an I claims to alter your life with its’ gazzilion features. Kindle promises to rekindle your literary affair. Are we losing track of who we are and what we want?

Me, I know exactly what I want. I am just waiting for the invention that will help us grow mushrooms in our underwear. After all the fungi does prefer shady areas and often lands up in a soup 

Hi Purba! I must say there is a freshness in the way you write and the words flow with effortless ease, and we the readers are kind of eager to catch each drop splashed our side. Very fluid way of writing, I like it!

And freaky ! PR why farmers, men would always be hungry, seeing the rice on bra or the rice bra.And chips in phone while talking to mother, wife, sis, daughter, to know, " what women want " ? With a Lie Detector such inventions should be available in due course

Hmmm.....paddy field bras are fine but they should install a stove and a cooker or a mini microwave in the undies. I mean, one can't eat the rice raw.And with mushrooms one could even try making cheese and wine in the underwears. Too bad for the company that makes Mycoderm the anti-fungal powder.Don't forget the armpits. A thingie attached their could help roast fish and heat bread. Plus they could again double as mushroom factories.There is tremendous potential in this market. You just have to use your imagination to tap it.

Well,everyone want to go green.So these will be just normal attires in future.Afterall fashion models have already shown the path to these scientists.Girls using cabbage bra's,grass skirts,mean wearing equivalent natural gooseberry bottoms.

This is actually fascinating.I wouldn't be surprised if cyborg's become a reality in our daily life.Technology is already compact - but in the next gen - technology will be intuitive.

so the wonder bra might become soft when you feel romantic and or change form and become an iron lock when you are angry. Likewise male under wears will be open and lock only to pre registered person or environment. !! ha ha !

Landed on your blog from indiblogger and I'm glad I did.Satiric take on technologies-loved the post very much! :)Btw I was reminded of Abby's vibrating panties from The Ugly Truth while going through your post...which was gross but funny in a way. :\

Lol ... reminds me of the good old days of .."yeh andar kaa mamlaa hai"...do we really have to try so "hard". ...loved it Purba....not sure how many women would suscribe for the free coupons on that website ... lol