OFFICE COMPETITION

The others are muscling in

It was inevitable, really. The object of your attention has become the focus of all the gym-pumped alpha males in your office. “Guys always compete,” says Dr Wheatley.

They don’t love her like you do, though. No one could.

“Displays of dominance are no longer about size,” says Daniel. “What women look for these days is comfort, and that comes from laughter. If some dude starts boasting about how big he is, say, ‘Wow, you do look strong. Like someone shaved a bear and gave it ecstasy.’”

You’re all going for drinks

Resist the temptation to fob them all off to hang out exclusively with her. “Your colleagues know you,” says Dr Wheatley. “If you suddenly start acting differently they’ll notice and immediately start ripping the piss out of you. Which is not what you want.”

Daniel advises, “Always buy a round of drinks straight away. It shows you’re a nice guy. Then, because everyone’s polite in Britain, chances are everyone will be buying you drinks for the rest of the night. So you’ll seem popular too.”