Shoe Porn: 27 Kick-Ass Kicks To Blast Off The 'Ber' Months

Hear that, fellas? That is the sound of a bevy of awesome new kicks from top brands stomping in unison, much to the delight of our shoe-lovin' hearts! That other sound is saliva drooling out of our wide-open mouths.

From casual top-siders to sleek cross-trainers and high-tops, a new collection of goodies are waiting to shelter your feet in fashion awesomeness, as well as bring optimum functionality in different areas. It's almost like taking a peek into the shoe closet of Imelda—if she was a dude.

We'd buy them all if we had the moolah. Sadly, we're not the Janet Napoles kind and we'd be content with maybe a pair or two. Anyway, we list all of the new shoes we'd gladly be good boys for this Christmas. Check them out and see how cool it would be to kick off the 'ber' months with a pair of two!

Merrell's ruggedly handsome kicks for casual walking and training

Add a macho appeal to your daily walks and cross-training sessions with these bad boys from Merrell. With durable hides and striking lines, they will add a bit more angas to the lower half of your bod—even if you have chicken legs.