Alice B. Grist

Dear Men, I’d like to invite you over to the other side, to the feminine, the girl, the woman within. Consider this a sacred trip to another dimension, a bit like Sci-Fi or Star Wars, but from within your own flesh.

There is no black and white when it comes to gender. To pretend there was, got us places. You won wars, built cities and we women kept things hygienic (which arguably allowed you to side step black plague and get creating) and, of course, we raised the young ones. It was a dualistic nonsense. And it worked. Until it didn’t. Until we Women decided we were getting the rough deal and lobbied, railed and acted against it.

Many of you guys have staunchly kept to your end of the gender rainbow. Millennium of disparaging the feminine has become entrenched in your being. You hang tight to the myth your forefathers created that female is less than, that you are all you need, that manliness is next to godliness...

This is not about rejecting the masculine. Rather, it is initiating a new understanding of the many layers of the male, as it relates to the multitude of ‘female’, and that interwoven into the fabric of our being this creates a kaleidoscope of worth, wisdom and knowing.

Having lived through a feminist revolution, where girls became like boys and then rejected it, but kept a little man-ish to ourselves, I can wholeheartedly recommend a dalliance with the other half.

So what do men have to gain from indulging your inner woman? Well the other half of humanity has a lot to teach you, not least about oppression and not most about love. But until we all dig a little deeper, flow past the restrictive rules of a strictly gendered culture we didn’t create, we will never connect to our full self and our incredible human potential.

To begin, if any part of you considers the feminine to be lesser, then that needs amending straight away. We are halves of a whole. There is such wonderful diversion and difference within that whole. No person is alike and the sensibility that speaks to ‘less than’ is a myth. See your inner girl as a valid, equal, powerful part of your self, and invite her to show you truth. Let her parts mingle and mash. What comes next is fodder for your very soul.

How do you recognize her when she arises? She is the heart that you overrule, so often with your head and your logic. She is the softness of the little boy you placed aside, who was told too many times, he should not cry, he should not express, he should put down his sister’s doll. She is the strength to survive anything and everything from wholesale oppression through to the mundane frustration of daily life. She is a multitude of fractured parts that offer nothing but benefits and wisdom to your current world understanding.

When you choose to open to your inner woman, you reconnect to the spectrum of humanity. In recognizing the archetypal female self that resides within you open up the possibility of wholeness that is so lacking when you stick too hard to one end of the gendered dichotomy. For she runs deeper than you might expect. She takes you to whole new realms. She is a modern day vision quest of the soul, stints in the desert, peyote and starvation not required.

She is not just a mother, a lover and a sister. Your inner woman is a visionary, a priestess and an anarchic rebel who takes on the status quo and imprints her will upon it. She takes your static civilization and infuses it with something unique, passionate and intuitive. Bring her in so that she might lead you out of your societally molded self. Her gift is as generous as hard-nosed patriarchy was not. If you allow her she may raise you up, to something new, something I can’t even put my finger on because it is so beyond this moment. She is the next dimension, the next step in evolution, be at the feminine forefront, dude, because she is our revolution.

Tips for connecting to the Feminine within.

Speak from your heart, with other men. Your interpretation of her, through your male countenance is valid, real and fascinating.

Get out into nature and recognize the rhythms and powers of mother earth. She is the ultimate purveyor of life, the ever-present mother of every single thing.

Talk and listen. Express yourself. Consider how you feel before you react. Chat about your actions. Investigate that tickle within that might end in laughter, or maybe tears. Live it all the way through to its climax.

Create. Not for the purpose of domination, power or success. But for it’s own sake. In whatever way pleases you.

When logic moves you one-way, side step it for a moment. Let your heart have a say. Just because something makes more sense, doesn’t mean it is the right way.

Be with women, openly and honestly. Ask them how it feels to be female. See how it may feel the same as you, and different from you all at the same time.

Read books by women. Watch films by and starring women.

Go out of your way to seek out the feminine that is all around you, and absorb a little of it. Let it be your inspiration.

Commit to healing your inner man. Open up to variations of masculinity. Release the rule book that keep you small. Wake up to the possibility that lays within.