XII

On the Principle, Politick and Happenstance of Compiling a CMG Podcast

Once upon a time Scott was all, “Hey, who wants to do the podcast for February,” and I was all, “Oh me, me, that’s my birthday month! Yay! Yaaaayyy…” and so at first it was going to be a wintry hip-hop mix, y’know, what hip-hop sounds like in February, and it was centered around Subtle’s “I Heart L.A.,” and Dose thanked me for asking for the song but told me I had to talk to the suits, and the suits never talked back to me, and Noah23 never returns my phone calls, and when I tried to get the title track off that TTC, I e-mailed their manager Mago, and Mago asked me to e-mail Mago about it, so I just e-mailed Mago again and shrugged and said c’est la vie because that’s French, right, then Josh Martinez responded and asked me if I wanted to use something newer than “Breakdown,” but I said “no” because “Breakdown” is my mope-jam, and Josh was all, “That’s cool, give my best to nool,” and by “nool” he meant Aaron Newell, who gave Josh a couple beats once (isn’t that rad?), and so, the way things were going, I decided I’d be better off making a banger hip-hop mix, and for some reason I thought that meant I should get an Anticon track, but Baillie from Anticon was like, “Dude, your review of Sole’s last album pissed him off, he’d strangle me with his pony tail if I gave you ‘Sebago,’” (ok, I added that last part) which I guess is understandable ‘cause I did do a little hatin’, so then I wanted to use “Roll With the Winners” by Clipse, but I had no idea how to clear that, it’s a mixtape song with a T.I. beat, I was scared Clinton Sparks would cut me, so then I took the other tracks that I had cleared and put them all together with an ear on the transitions, and trying to make the thing flow, and splitting the thing up into two sides with Animal’s lo-fi ditty at the middle, and smiling because opening with a track called “We’re So Underground We’re Practically in Japan” was mighty cheeky of me, but then closing with a track called “Thank You Music Guru” was too cheeky, so it got cut and now Lost on Purpose probably hates me, along with the five other bands who I cut because I couldn’t make them fit, but most likely they don’t even care and forgot I asked to use their stuff, and now the mix isn’t wintry or a banger, it’s just like the weather’s been this February in Ohio, a slushy mix of temperatures, as if the season’s been given to us by an indecisive god, and I have listened to the mix 122 times (according to my iTunes counter) to determine whether I dig it, but, of course, the fact that I listened to it that many times doesn’t help any, so I’m just throwing it out there, y’know, and I hope y’all dig it, and many thanks to all the emcees and bands and labels who even did so much as speak to me because, to paraphrase Final Destination 3, that was, like, so totally nice of them.

Oh, and the podcast is only 13 tracks because I like to keep things short and organized.