When we return from a beautiful 2 week vacation in the Caribbean and can’t find the keys to the car. After we, along with the flight attendants, tear apart the carry-ons, I make sure to tell my husband this would never have happened if I had been in charge of the keys! I then find the keys in my pocket, once we get home. –Tammy, Canada

When I wake up to my husband sporting a raging boner, and at that moment I remember I’m no longer on my period… – Anonymous in Canada.

When a fart is more than just a fart and you are at a christening for the day. Anonymous in the USA

When I spend one hour cleaning the kitchen from top to bottom; everything is in pristine condition and I am finally at peace. Five minutes later, I return to find a pile of cheese wrappers, a banana peel, and a wadded napkin on the kitchen counter top directly ABOVE the trash can. Writer, Alison Huff.

When I sit through a 4 hour flight with baby shit all over my shirt. Dana, Canada.

When my 2 year-old writes with gold sharpie on my dark granite. ALL over it. And my 7 yr old walks around the house vomiting through the night. Donna, USA

Fuck a duck, indeed!

There is never a shortage of fuck a duck-worthy situations in the life of a mom which is why we deserve a nice martini to toast with as we digress into the moment at hand.

Therefore, I present The Fuck a Ducktini:

For moms who digress…

What you’ll need:

1 oz. of vodka

1 oz. of pineapple juice

1 oz. orange juice

1. oz of Baby Duck Sparkling wine.

Method:

Fill a metal shaker with ice and add the above ingredients, including the juice of one large lime slice.

Shake, shake, shake your booty and your shaker.

Strain this bad girl into your martini glass.

Garnish with a duck and zero fucks.

Toast: toswearing, to sharing, and to … ducks.

Did you know that Shannon Day and 36 other fab writers have created a book? Well, it’s actually a martini guide too. If you like funny, ridiculous, and heartstring-tugging stories of motherhood (+ easy-to-make martini & mocktini recipes) then you’ll love Martinis & Motherhood: Tales of Wonder, Woe & WTF?! Available now on Amazon.

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2 thoughts on “What Makes a Mom Say: “F*ck a Duck!”?”

I shall endevor to include the phrase “Fuck a Dack” at least once in every conversation…such elegance :)!
I can just see Achilles holding his arrow-hit heal, hopping accros Troy and yelling “Fuuuuck a daaaaack!!!”. Truly, timles elegance!
Bravo, madam, 👏!