The Crapbox...Comic books found in the quarter bin or half-off store or the bargain box. The good, the bad and the really ugly. Get ready for a surprise. Updates EVERY Friday and Monday until the Crapbox runs dry. (never happen)

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

I have a lot
of respect for Jada Pinkett-Smith. I noticed her late in her career, when she
was playing the girl Friday bit part in Damon Wayon’s A Low Down Dirty Shame. The movie was unfocused and poorly plotted,
but she made the Peaches character worth watching. After that I paid attention
whenever she was mentioned as part of a movie’s cast, usually raising my
estimation of what those efforts would produce. So I missed several years of
her TV credits including her run in A
Different World. I also had skipped on Jada’s dramatic turn in Menace II Society. However, since Shame
I’ve watched her camp it up in Tales
from the Crypt, hold her own onscreen against Eddie Murphy in the awful
fart-comedy The Nutty Professor,
negotiate the Matrix in two movies as the cool-as-ice Niobe, handle business in a pre-Batman Gotham, marry the equally
talented Will Smith, pop out two kids and act as frontwoman for the heavy metal
band Wicked Wisdom.

It is with
heavy heart that I have to bring this string of praise to a halt and tell you
about the comic book Menace.

Menace was a work published by Rob Liefeld’s
Awesome imprint. Jada is listed as creator and writer on the book. Art chores
are handled by Dan Fraga, who’s been all over, most recently in Wolverine.
Fraga looks bit like Choi mixed with Turner, which isn’t bad given today’s
standards. Color was handled by the husband and wife team Richard and Tanya
Horie. While the issue tops out at 21 pages of Menace material, the whole book
feels lite on actual story. Not only that, the story that is there is a direct
rip-off of two other characters. But let’s start with the controversy before we
start nailing down why this book earns such a low place in the Crapbox.

The actual
history of how this book came about is a matter of contention. Artist Dan Fraga
in an interview with Sequential Tart pretty much dismissed the whole title as a
Liefeld ploy to get a movie contract with Will Smith. His direct quote:

“Do you want
to talk about failed attempts? For his own publishing company, Rob had a book
tailored for Will Smith’s wife, just long enough to get a movie deal with her
husband. Once papers were signed, the book deal was over.”

Note that
Dan’s saying this is pretty damning, since Fraga wasn’t just an artist at
Awesome, but also one of Liefeld’s closest friends.

The movie deal that Dan
mentions here was for a property called “The Mark” which, according to Dan, was
an almost blatant rip-off of Starbrand. Awesome’s Comicon preview for that year had both
Menace and The Mark in its one-shot sketch flip book, although the pages for
The Mark were done up like movie storyboards instead of comic book panels. Oh,
and The Mark’s cover showed a very Will Smith-ish guy in tights.

Rob responded
to these accusations of course with his usual style and grace:

“The one
absolute error in Dan's post is the idea that I signed a comic book deal with
Jada Pinkett-Smith in order to create a movie deal with Will Smith on The Mark.
Everyone who worked at Awesome who can read time and follow a calendar will see
that the dates don't match up. The Mark was sold to Will Smith in July of 1997,
the deal was finalized with contracts in December of 1997. Menace, the book
created by Jada Pinkett for Awesome began in January of 1998 and was
temporarily shut down in March of 1998 when the primary investor had financial
problems. I resumed production on the series in the fall of '98 and the book
came out at Thanksgiving of '98. The series didn't continue because Jada
decided not to go forward with it after the first issue which I know she
enjoyed.”

That’s all
well and good, except for this excerpt in the back of Menace (published in
November 1998):

“The Road to Menace

It’s not
often you receive a call informing you that one of Hollywood’s hottest young talents is
interested in exploring a comic book project. Well, such was the case nearly two years ago…”

Nearly two
years ago from November 1998, puts the start of the Menace project sometime in
late 1996 to early 1997. Clearly the Menace book was well underway before
Will Smith signed any contracts on The Mark. The fact that his wife’s book
wasn’t published until end-of-year 1998 not withstanding.

So what is
the real story behind how Menace came to be? Was Liefeld using Jada’s desire to
produce a comic (which, by the way makes her sound like one of the most awesome
chicks ever, even if the work she produced wasn’t so stellar.) to ensnare her top
rung movie star husband to a property he could license? Was all this just coincidental
timing? We will probably never know.

But not
knowing doesn’t stop me from putting forth my theory. *Remember kids, theories
are someone’s best guess about something using the information at hand and that
person’s skills at logical deduction and reasoning. SoC isn’t that bright and
there is a large chance his theory is DEAD WRONG.

So here goes:
I believe Fraga is correct in that the Menace book was part of scheme to get
Will Smith involved in one of Liefeld’s properties. Let’s face it, Rob doesn’t
seem like the most trustworthy guy, what with his reputation for mishandling
funds at Image and similar stories. So Rob pitches and hooks Will at the same
time as he makes a deal to produce a comic series for his wife. I haven’t said
anything here that Dan didn’t, but I’m about to step off this limb and see if I
can fly another idea: I believe that ongoing production of a Menace comic book
would somehow obligate Will Smith to do a "The Mark" movie. I’m wondering if
somewhere in the contract for Menace isn’t a clause that states words to those
effect.

There was one, single, uno issue of Menace produced. It had three
covers, but still only an issue number one. Sounds sinister but is entirely
plausible that Rob would surely give up the revenue of producing even a low selling
title for the hope a movie property with an A-lister like Smith. Plus it would
feed his enormous ego to no end to say he had a movie coming out, even if it
was a stinker based on ideas taken from other sources.

My theory
ends with Jada axing the series after issue one so Will doesn’t have a blemish
on his acting career. It sounds too bittersweet, so it’s probably horribly way
off base. *sigh*

Well, enough
melodrama about “how” possibly the book got here.

We need to concentrate on if it’s any
good. And it’s really not. Dan Fraga’s art is the best part of the whole
affair. He does sexy ladies very well.

Unfortunately this book needs more than
eye candy. What it needs is to stop borrowing so heavily from Spawn and The Crow. The story is
decompressed to the point of us barely getting an origin story out in this
issue, with Menace making her appearance on the last two pages. Her powers are
completely unknown and since no follow up seems likely, will remain a mystery
forever.

I keep thinking I should make up some powers to give to her just so
she doesn’t feel left out.

Our story
begins with three hot chicks doing lines of coke in a Hummer. These lethal
ladies are enforcers for a drug kingpin named Black who happens to be African
American. I point that out because if he was an American Indian I have no doubt
that his name would be Red. Such is the level of non-stereotypicalness in this
story. Anyway, here is “Menace” (no one names their daughter Menace. Who’s her
Father? Hank Ketcham?) and her girls preparing to make a drop.

I’m not sure
which offends me more: the slutty way these girls are dressed, the fact that
all of them are coke-heads or that they go by stripper names like Crystal and
Taffy. I also started a mental count of words per page just to see what the top
tally would be. This whole page has a sum total of 12. Moving on to pages 2-3 leads to an increase in word count to 17 across those two! You have to divide by two because pages two and three are
one big pin-up of girls looking hot.

Yes, Dan
Fraga can draw! The only bad part is that Dan Fraga is apparently drawing for a
lingerie and fetish clothing catalogue. Our girls are headed for a club owned
by the local drug dealer, Dill. I think that name is symbolic because it will
rapidly become apparent that he’s in a bit of a pickle.

When they get to the
club (page 4, 36 words), they bypass the line waiting to get in which pisses
off a couple of the chicks in line. They mouth off to our trio who put them in
their place (page 5, 12 words- 4 “mouth sound effects”).

Not only can
Fraga draw, but he has a great sense of panel layout as well. Looks like it
really lends itself to telling a story. To bad this book doesn’t really have
much of a story to tell. The girls enter the club and head for Dill’s office.

I’m waving my
hands like I don’t care what happens next in this book, does that count? I
expect that every hip-hop club you ever go to has a DJ that uses those exact
same words. It’s not cliché or anything. Dan has two of the guys on the floor
dancing like they are throwing punches. That’s not a dance floor I’d like to
get out on. I do like the very brief back-and-forth between the couple on the
dance floor. I only wish the story would rise to their level of wittiness.

Menace gets
to the club’s backroom after submitting to two pages of frisking by Dill’s men.
The henchmen trade lines like “Spread ‘em sweet cheeks. Ooh, You’re soft…and I
bet you are juicy too.” which is entirely embarrassing for anyone above the age
of 14 who might be reading. Menace and the girls come up clean and several younger
members of our audience’s pants come up stained.

We move from
the soft-core porn back to our story. Menace delivers a staggering amount of
blow which Dill checks out and approves. He counters with a suitcase full of
cash which prompts Menace to unveil the real reason she’s been sent to handle
this transaction.

Wow, Black
has sent Dill a coke and a smile! Then just as Dill lets his guard down, Crystal passes Menace one
of those two giant hair pins holding up her tresses. Menace makes Dill’s head
the main course on a shiskabob and the girls proceed to mess up his henchdudes.
Heels to the face, throat crushing and groin penetration are just a few of the
hazards faced by Dill’s fellows this evening. When the dust settles, only
Menace and her ladies are left standing. They beat a hasty retreat with both
suitcases out the back window.

While making
their getaway, Black pages Menace and directs her to a specific street corner.
She balks at stopping in the middle of making a getaway from Dill’s men, but
follows his orders. This ends up being a large mistake on her part as Black has
decided to rub her out too.

Spongebob
Squarepants has less holes in him than she does. Menace is rushed to an
emergency room where an angelic being appears. Is he here to ease her suffering
as she passes on to the next life?

No! He’s here
to punish the crap out of her. Now HE would make a great comic book main
character. Floating around zapping everyone for all the stuff they pulled in
their prior lives as they breath their lasts. Sort of like a very patient
Spectre. I could dig that. Unfortunately this isn’t about him so much as what
he does to Menace.

And it’s at
this juncture that Menace finishes stealing from Spawn and moves on to The
Crow. Our main character dies, is buried and is reborn wearing black leather
with a face like a Mari Gras masque.

From the
looks of things you can assume that the next few issues will be tales of
revenge and redemption with Menace killing off the ones who did her wrong
culminating with her settling the score with Black.

And assume all you want to.
This is the only issue of Menace that will ever see print. I mean, it came out
in 1998 and even Liefeld’s latest book wasn’t 30 or so years past its solicited date.
Jada, I’m sorry if this work doesn’t reflect your true writing talent. Mostly
cause it sucks and stuff.

I
don't have a clue. I stay away from spoilers or production notes of movies I
plan on seeing. In the case of Star Trek, I even stay away from them on the
movies I actively DON'T plan on seeing. And this is one. I would love to not have to watch it, but Cthulhu-Boy (my son) may force my hand. I am not looking forward to
the experience.

Sorry
folks, Into Darkness killed this version for me. I don't give my money
to series that screw up this badly. Ask the Alien franchise after Prometheus.

What
didn't screw up even the least bit was Peter David's 1989 comic book extension of the Star Trek
universe. Set after Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, David took the iconic original
cast near the tail end of their movie career, mixed in his blend of new
characters, a smattering of old references and spun the mess of elements into a
clever, homage-heavy but still enjoyable monthly.

And
David really knows his Trek stuff.

The
book that popped out of the Crapbox this time was the middle act of a three
issue story where the Klingon Empire has finally gotten James T. Kirk to stand
trial for the events of Star Trek III: The Search for Spock. The charges?
Murder (of Commander Kruge, played by Christopher Lloyd) and a violation of the
Prime Directive (more on that in a moment).

Kirk
has hired a hot-shot defense lawyer to represent him.

David
gets a minor detail wrong here. The defense attorney in the story is named
Samuel T. Cogsley, and it is implied that he is the same defense attorney who
defended Kirk in Court Martial, Episode 15 of the Original Series…BUT according
to the official Star Trek resource, that gentleman was named Samuel T. COGLEY.
Before the vast expansion of the internet age, details like this were probably
pretty hard to pin down, so let's not give David a hard time on this one.

What
including the detail of adding Cogley or Cogsley into the story does point out
is the level of fandom that David approached the series with. My friend Brian
Hughes, of 3rd Degree Byrne fame and a huge Star Trek fan, claimed that after a while David including all theses call backs
tended to bug him.

"Peter
David has a tendency, as most comic book writers do, to tie everything into
everything. See his Next-Gen novel 'Q-Squared' as exhibit #1. So
you can expect any of David's Trek related comics will be chock full of ties to
TV Trek, even if it means using a
character you only saw once back in the 60's."

For
me however, I welcome David's nods back to TOS and enjoy the heck out of his
callbacks and remembrances.

It is
good that I do because this book is, as Brian so rightly puts it, "chock full"
of them. Anyway, the charges levied against Kirk also include violation of the
Prime Directive. Let's start with the opening augment from Cogsley/Cogley.

Nicely
stated. We then hear from a new character from a prior issue of this comic book,
The Salla of the Nasgul. David did a good job in creating the villain, a
religious extremist/cult leader-type, even if he appears to have borrowed part
of the name from Tolkien's Ringwraiths. The Salla appeared in issue number 1 of
this run, which included an altercation with Kirk that I'll allow The Salla to
explain.

Before
continuing I want to praise James W. Fry's pencils and Arne Starr's inks. While
the books interiors are a bit sparse for my likings, the faces and anatomy
really shine. It is neat to see photo lifts of the cast in their later years
rendered so faithfully and I have to admit to a little bit of love for the book
to have rendered them thus. We don't need a dashing 30 year-old stand-in for
Kirk. We need a realistic older crew that fits in with the tone of David's
storyline, which is exactly the direction Fry and Starr take things.

And
back to that storyline, The Salla clearly has an axe to grind because Kirk didn't
roll over and allow him to flat out murder his follower. This translates into a
charge of violating the Prime Directive, which any Trek fan worth his salt
knows is the principle of non-intervention in other cultures' affairs. And to be
honest, a rule that Kirk has flirted with ignoring during his time in the
center seat.

Looks
like The Salla has reviewed Kirk's history. And that is where the book takes
off into some great fan-love. This issue could show the screenwriters of JJ
Abrams last outing how you do callbacks and nostalgia correctly, by
incorporating them into the story in a way that is natural not just "Hey
look, a Tribble! And Kahn! See! It's STAR TREK!"

Let's
start with Salla's first witness, a gentleman by the name of Anan 7.

Sulu
and his daughter throw out a nice little one liner on a different TOS character
before we move on to who Anan 7 really is. I'll have to admit, I didn't
remember him either until David has him explain his connection to Kirk.

Oh,
yeah! The episode was called Taste of Armageddon. I remember it now. Two
planets using computers to determine who lived or died in a virtual war that
tried to make the tragedy of endless conflict "civilized." The
populace would voluntarily walk into disintegration chambers if they were
considered casualties of an attack. The upside would be that no architecture or
art would be destroyed.

Sad
that they met such a tragic end here, but they knew the cost of all-out war
when they started. The idea should never be to minimize its impact in such a
way that it is considered routine. Perhaps they aren't quite civilized enough
to make peace.

So
yah, Kirk did stick his nose in there a bit. Any way to turn this around on The
Salla?

Great
job, Cogsley!

Note
how David understands the principles of the TOS universe. It isn't smash-em up,
sci fi action, like the Abrams reboot. It is thought-provoking with very little
action, but tons of dramatic punch.

THIS
is Star Trek to me and always will be. The drama of a series of intergalactic
morality tales interwoven with pointed moments of action that serve to move the
story forward but are not, in and of themselves, the resolution to the current
conflict. It isn't enough for two bad guys to duke it out in Star Trek as an
ending. Trek is cerebral. It is about concepts of right and wrong. It should
never be defined as "the physically strongest character is the winner so
his side is right." It has always been about something deeper than that.

And
that's what Abrams, who never saw the series before being tapped for the
reboot, completely missed about Star Trek. We will see if Beyond gets any
closer to that understanding.

Back
in our story, the next witness is called while we get a nice scene of Bones and
Spock quibbling. I think David doesn't want us to forget we are in a Star Trek
book or something.

And
another thing the movies have missed so far about TOS Star Trek: yes, it is an
ensemble cast, but Bones, Spock and Jim are not just characters. Those three
are metaphorical stand-ins for emotion, logic and an almost id-like instinctual
understanding and drive. When any two of them are in conversation, the audience
gets a front row view of their own intellectual processes brought to bear on an
issue.

I
can think of no better example of this than Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn.
The scene where all three of them discuss the ramifications of the Genesis device.
Bones comes at the problem with moralizing and emotion, Spock with logical deduction
and analysis and Jim with a desire for action and conflict resolution. It
really is masterful how these three interact.

Yet
this same dynamic has not materialized in either of the new movies. Not only
that, the character traits are not present in these new versions. Bones is
largely absent or sidelined to supporting roles, Spock is shown as a sullen,
emotionally stunted child and Jim is more of a James Dean rebel with no sense
of authority. What a waste of an opportunity.

But
enough about that, on display here is a clear indicator of what that should
look like. Great job, David, seriously.

Our
next witness should be no surprise to any Trek fan. And David gives them a
grand entrance with a breeze by of his character R.J. Blaise.

Oh,
yes! It's the return of this fella. Make that "goodfella."

Bela
Oxmyx, the wise-guy leader of Sigma Iotia II from the episode entitled "A
Piece of the Action." Any trekkie worth his salt can see where this is
going. First a bit of embarrassment all around though.

Amid
the general humiliation, Bela does do something which hurts Kirk's case in a
manner in which even Cogsley can't gloss over.

First
Kirk tries to find out why Bela is there…

Then
he takes a stab at explaining himself…

And
if the judge won't buy that, he certainly won't buy what happens next. Just when
it looks like Kirk could be off the hook…

…Bela
skewers him. Ladies and Gentlemen, Kirk's piece of the action…

…and
that's not all!

Well
it's nice to know that little tidbit from the end of the episode isn't still a
potential problem. If you don't remember why, go back and see it.

Next
up is someone I didn't recognize.

Meet
Leonard James Akaar, The Teer of the Ten Tribes and ruler of planet Capella IV from
the episode "Friday's Child." Perhaps I didn't recognize him because
his only TOS appearance was as a newborn, a child whose birth as the son of the
slain Teer leader only occurred because Kirk bent the rules while directly
confronting the Klingon interference in the planet's political struggle for their
own gain. Or perhaps I don't recall it because Julie Newmar also factored heavily into that
episode. She is a bit distracting.

Anyway,
Akaar is VERY glad Kirk intervened to save him. He pins the Klingon
ambassador's cape to the wall with a handful of pencils and then has a nice
face down when The Salla considers questioning him.

I
could go on and on about this book, but I think I'll leave it where David does:
teasing an appearance in the next issue by the Klingon Emperor.

DC's
Star Trek, vol. 2 ended in February of 1996, getting a good seven year run.
David lasted the first fifteen issues and then did a few one shots.The
majority of the run was Howard Weistein and were decent to good. Still
more than a year's worth of Peter David issues is a great thing and fans of TOS should
definitely seek them out.