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Sunday, January 6, 2013

Just another day of her life.

"I'm alright.. It's just because of less sleep", she said convincingly looking down at the people enjoying and laughing with their friends. She had stopped smiling, stopped talking and even stopped looking at people's face if they tried to talk to her. She is lost in a cold world.

He didn't know what else to say? And it wasn't the first time that she left someone speechless. He still stood next to her looking at those people with her. She looked calm while a hundred of things were going inside her head.

He hesitantly asked, "So umm, where are the other two friends of yours with whom you hang out usually?"

"I don't hang out with them anymore", She said, abruptly.

"Why? What's wrong?"

"I dunno.. I.. I realized where I stand in their lives" She said giving a crooked smile.

He was a little perplexed with that answer. He was about to ask her what exactly happened when his friend walked over, frowning about the next class.

She chuckled looking at his friend, just to seem normal. She talked to both of them about the classes and the assignments and all other work loads. They all talked till the bell went off. And they went to their classrooms for the next three classes.

It was becoming like a everyday thing to her. She gets up in the morning, gets ready for the college, goes to college, hates people, attends class, tries to do everything perfectly, get questioned for being alone, attends more classes and comes back home. She was mysterious. She didn't have true answers to the questions, "How are you?" or "What's wrong?" because she knew that people wouldn't understand.

She is suicidal. She wants to die. But if you ask her how she is and how everything is in her life. She'll say that she is alright and everything is fine. You can't believe her just like that. When a person "really" wants to die, they won't let you know before doing it 'cause they know that you will try to save them.