How to Save a Relationship With Your Boyfriend

If your relationship boat seems to be filled with holes and gashes, a sunken ship is almost inevitable- unless of course you have the right tools to fix the mess and start sailing once again. These 10 handy tips to save a relationship with your boyfriend will help your seemingly disastrous and failing partnership get back on solid ground where the two of you belong!1. Assess What Went Wrong I’m sure the two of you didn’t go to bed on Tuesday night as happy as can be, only to wake up to sadness and misery; it just doesn’t work that way. There had to be a REASON why the relationship started going south. What was it? Take some time to assess why your relationship is failing so you can fix the actual problems without wasting any precious time. You can do this alone, or talk with your partner to get his side of the story too.

2. Decide Whether or Not It is Worth Saving This will definitely be a tough decision, but you really need to give it some thought. Of course you have deep feelings for your partner, but sometimes relationships just aren’t worth saving. Is yours? Assess the pros and the cons of the overall relationship and whether or not fixing it will benefit the two of you and your futures.

3. Communicate With Your Partner Communication is undoubtedly one of the most important things that make up a relationship. Without communication, there simply can’t be a solid foundation. If your relationship has been on a downward spiral recently, you’ve probably noticed that the communication has been lacking as well. There’s probably a lot of awkward tension and dinners spent with small talk, rather than a meaningful conversation that keeps the two of you interested. Spark up a convo with your mate- and actually talk about things that matter. Sure it’s okay to talk about your day, but the conversation needs to be more than small talk you’d have with someone on an elevator.

4. Be Open and Honest This goes hand in hand with communicating with your partner, only taking it a step further. Don’t be afraid to be open and honest with your partner about everything. Voice your feelings and opinions, and accept your partners feelings and thoughts as well. Sharing what’s going on in your mind and being completely honest with each other will help bring the two of you back together on a deeper level. And remember: sometimes you’re not always going to hear what you want to hear, but be accepting of what your mate has to say.

5. Stop Fighting! If your relationship is in need of saving there’s probably a LOT of fighting going on. It could be something as little as yelling at each other about who left the cap off the toothpaste tube to more serious things like money issues or paying the bills. Come to an agreement that the small, petty fights will come to an end. There’s no need for that kind of struggle and strife in a relationship. And when it comes to bigger issues, agree to talk about it with your boyfriend instead of arguing and heating things up. You’ll notice an overall happier relationship with less fighting and a whole lot more communicating.

6. Spend a Romantic Evening Together When the flame is dying off, then you need to spark it up! Even if it doesn’t seem like the most ideal date right now, the two of you NEED to do something romantic together. It may be exactly what you need to bring back the love and romance to your relationship. Keep it simple with a fancy dinner and dancing under the moonlight, or make a whole weekend out of it with a special weekend getaway to that special spot the two of you both love. Magic will certainly be in the air and you’ll be able to rekindle that lost love in no time.

7. Try Something New Together So you go and try something new together, something the two of you have never tried before. You and your boyfriend are not only spending some serious quality time together, but you’re forced to work TOGETHER to learn something new and conquer it. In the process you’ll be sharing tons of giggles, laughs, and smiles, while learning to depend on each other and ask each other for help; not to mention learn a totally awesome new skill you can use for the rest of your life. Seriously, it’s tons of fun and there’s so much you and your boyfriend will benefit from simply trying something new. Go sign up for a class ASAP!8. Remember the Fun Times the Two of You Had Looking at pictures of the past, where you’re smiling and having tons of fun, is sure to spark some sentiment and longing for that happiness to continue. Even talking about some amazing memories you have with your boyfriend is an easy and quick way to rekindle the romance. Take a night off to snuggle on the bed with your partner with a photo album handy. Look through the pictures and remember all of the great times the two of you had together. You will quickly notice you won’t be able to stop smiling and the two of you will probably end up saying, “We should do that again!” or “I miss that so much!”- all of which are excellent things to say when you’re relationship seems to be failing.

9. Create a Game Plan for the Future So you’ve gone through all the steps: you’re communicating more and being open and honest with each other, you’ve sparked up the romance and tried new things together, and it seems like the relationship is almost back to where it was before. GREAT! But don’t just go with the wind when it comes to your relationship. You and your boyfriend need to have a set of rules and a plan for the future so that a potential pitfall doesn’t happen again. Take an afternoon to create a solid game plan the two of you can both abide by.

10. Don’t Let Others Influence You Outside influences can actually ruin relationships; it’s crazy but true. You know, your best friend won’t stop telling you it’s a bad decision and he’s not right for you or your entire family hates him and says he needs to go. Ladies, if he is treating you right and you just have hit a major snag in the relationship, follow your heart. You know what’s best for you. Yes you should always consider the advice of others- especially those closest to you- but don’t let them make the decision for you. At the end of the day this is YOUR life, and if you’re happy and he’s a good man, keep at it.

Yes, a failing relationship is emotionally overwhelming and may seem too hard to overcome. But trust us- these 10 steps are exactly what you need to get your relationship back to where it needs to be! Have you ever been in a failing relationship? How did you and your boyfriend save it? We’d love to hear your tips and tricks below!

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13 Comments

Oladejo Ololade Mary

March 7, 2017 at 6:34 am

Hey I have a problem I lied to my bf about dating someone else he finally found out and now he is acting weird doing things he never did before. I love him so much I dnt wanna loose him. Please what do u think I should do

You cheated on him and lied about it. He probably has lost his love for you. You will want to have a direct and honest discussion with him. If he continues to act in a way that shows that he doesn’t care about you, then your relationship has ended. Take your experiences as a lesson that you should not cheat on your partner. Good day, Oladejo.

Hey I lied to my bf about dating another guy, now he found out I break up with the other guy and now ma present bf z doing things he didn’t do before I am begging him but he is Not answering me. I am so confused I don’t knw what to do I dnt wanna loose him. Please advice me

You cheated on him and lied about it. He probably has lost his love for you. You will want to have a direct and honest discussion with him. If he continues to act in a way that shows that he doesn’t care about you, then your relationship has ended. Take your experiences as a lesson that you should not cheat on your partner. Good day, Oladejo.

My boyfriend cheated on me with an ex he said was just a friend. I talked to her and she knew nothing about me. He broke it completely off with her and hasn’t talked to her at all. I forgave him and we are still together. I’m just so confused if it is real and how i know if he will do me the same way he did her?

I am not sure–it would be impossible to read his mind right now. The fling with the ex could have just been random or a sudden temptation. It could have also been something that he planned and wanted to do. If he broke things off with her, then it seems like he is interested in remaining in the relationship on some level. You have to decide what you want. IF you want to stay with him, you will have to learn to trust him again and forgive him completely for the past. If you decide that you do not want to take the risk of this happening again, then break up with him. Think through what you want first before you decide. Good luck, Tia!

Hi..well i really love my bf so much n i know he loves me too.but lately he is so busy with work that he contacted me less than usual.im just really sad bout that n i feel like he forgot bout me.but im trying my best to be understanding n stay with him.n i read ur 2nd tip,so im thinking if this is worth it.he is d kind of guy with rich people around him n dress nicely n stuff like its too good to be true.but im just an average person who can’t really dress as good as him coz im not as rich.he goes to meetings a lot bout his business n drink wine n stuff.he brought me to a bar once n of course he drinks that time coz its a bar n his friends were there.but i don’t drink so i look like a sore loser that time coz i didn’t know what to do at a bar.i looked bored n didn’t hv fun at all.if i were him,i would be so embarrassed to show myself to his friends as his gf.but he said,he doesn’t care bout that coz im his gf n he loves me.he does ask me if i want to buy or shop with him new clothes or shoes.but i feel so embarrassed to let him buy me expensive things coz i don’t want him to feel like im using him.every time i see him,he would comment on what i wear.i tried my best to look good n up to his standard but its so hard coz i don’t hv a skinny body to rock any outfit n i don’t hv that much to spend with.i feel inferior being around him n his friends. All this made me unsure if he loves me or not.but he said he loves me n serious bout me.he even talked bout d future a lot like kids n interiors of his dream home n sometimes marriage.but im so worried bout myself coz i don’t really know how to fit in his crowd.so what would u suggest? Should i stay with him or not

I would just listen to him when he says that he loves you and likes having you as his girlfriend. It honestly might not matter to him that you do not make as much money or you can’t wear as nice of clothes. Honestly, I would not even worry about it. If you were to get married, he probably plans on bringing in most of the money–after all, he already makes more. It will get easier over time to fit in with the people around him, and it probably is not as hard as you think. If you are intellectually on the same playing field, it isn’t really an issue. Don’t worry so much! He likes you, so enjoy your relationship!

Thank you for d advice admin.but he is contacting me less lately coz he said he is ‘busy’.not sure if thats true or not.i feel like he is not interested any more n thats disappointing.me n him r so different,i always tell him that.but he asked me back,so different people can’t be together?i don’t know why im so worried bout us in a lot of aspects.thanks for hearing me out admin i just don’t know who to talk to bout this.my friends wouldn’t understand my situation

okay, so i am stuck in a prob , me and my bf are in a serious relationship like its almost 1 year we are dating each other.and now unfortunately my family has decided to move on to another country so we are obviously going to be in a long distance relationship, we love each other a lot, will it work out to be in a long distance relationship, or should i breakup? need suggestions 🙁

A long distance relationship is just as likely to work out as an in person relationship–although, as you can see from the world’s divorce rates, in person relationships often do not work out that well. I think the decision to stay with him should depend on your chances of seeing him again. If you will be able to meet up with him at least once a year, then you could stay with him. If you won’t be able to see him until you graduate or expect it to be years, you may just want to move on right away. Personally, I was in a long distance relationship with my now-husband for a year and we lived in different countries. If you are willing to make it work and it is meant to work out, then it is entirely doable.