FT Working Moms, How do you balance work with the kiddo?

Anyone else having a hard time balancing work with spending enough time with their LO? I typically work 8-4:30 (M-F) getting home at 5pm. My DD is getting great about sleeping at night, but has also decided that 7pm is a good bedtime. I'm so frustrated that on weekdays I only get 2 hours a day with my DD before she's ready for bed, and of course they are her crankiest hours. I was raised by my SAHM and I have so much guilt about not being able to spend my days with my daughter and keep up a clean home and a provide a nightly home cooked meal. Silly, I know. I also feel like I'm missing out on so much of her life working full-time.

I'm wondering if others have this frustration, and what you've done to deal with it? I'm considering asking my boss if I can work earlier hours (6:30-3 or 7-3:30) in order to get an extra hour or so with her in the evenings. Also considering cutting back to part-time, though I think it would make things really tight financially for DH and I. Have also considered trying to find another job that would allow me to work from home some. Are there other creative solutions that others have come up? Thanks for listening.

Comments (33)

I could have wrote this exact post on this exact day! This week has been incredibly hard and I am re-evaluating my situation as well. At this time, DH doesn't make enough to support us. I am currently putting together a bullet point layout to discuss with my boss - but he is a single guy and I don't think he understands family life so I am worried it won't help.I am hoping to be granted allowance to work from home a few nights a week, doing work after she is asleep.

I wish I had a solution ... and look forward to reading what others have to say. My heart goes out to you because know exactly how you feel. As I was telling someone today, I don't even feel like I am raising her!

I could have written this post! It's so hard balancing everything. I try to stick to a really specific routine during the week. When I get home, I muse LO, then its into the bumbo on the kitchen where the girls help mommy make dinner. We all have dinner together every night and then we dance on the kitchen to the iPod while we do dishes. Then I put DD1 to bed and have pur 1:1 time before I nurse LO and have our 1:1 time before putting her down. Then we just make the most of the weekends with lots of family time. Saturdays during naps I do the laundry and Sundays during naps I clean the house.
I promise, it does get easier to fit it all in! I'm also really lucky to have an awesome DH who helps with everything.

I know exactly how you feel too as in going through the same thing. We are required to work overtime and I have a 50 minute commute one way. I go in at 7, work through lunch, and leave at 4 so at least I'm home by 5 and gave an extra hour for the day. Working the weekends too is where I draw the line and they know that. It's been really hard juggling everything and we literally get take out every night! Although I actually made spaghetti on Sunday night, big whoop! I feel like I am missing out on my DD growing up. If only I could win the lotto!

I work Monday- Thursday, 730 -5, so I know what you mean about quality time. I barge him every night and also put him to bed most nights. My husband gets his time with him in the afternoon as he usually picks lo up from daycare. Here are some things that help me: I spend no more than 2 hours every Sunday cleaning, picking up around the house, and cooking a few meals for the upcoming week. It helps with dinner and allows for some bag lunches. I grocery shop with like items in mind...i will put some stuff in a crock pot while I make a couple other things....taco meat, spaghetti, pizzas, roasts. I also bake a whole bunch of white and sweet potatoes-which can be made into different things. After lo is asleep during the week, we do the dishes from the day and some laundry. It only takes a few minutes and makes me feel better. That is all the cleaning that gets done during the week. The mess can wait. I have resigned myself to the fact that this is how it has to be right now. I enjoy my job. Actually I love my job! I know I'm a better mom because I can do what I love and he will see that when he grows up.

Having been raised by a full-time working mom, I think that working moms are great!!!! It's so hard to balance everything, but so is being a STHM and a wife. I am currently a STHM, not really out of choice but since I'm a teacher and the economy has made it tough to find a full-time job, a part-time one does not really cover daycare at this point...Honestly, it's great at times but also super tiring, stressful and "spending quality time with the baby" often consists of trying to work on him taking naps (today there were only three 30 minutes ones!). As you probably know, it's not as rosy as it seems. I'm often stressed out and some days seem so "unproductive". I understand your frustration; I'm just saying that being a STHM won't really change the pressures on housework and cooking (which are super difficult to do with my LO around).

So, don't quit your job yet. Changing your work hours to leave early seems like a GREAT idea!! That way, you can still be financially responsible and spend a little more time with your cute LO. Also, can you make weekends extra special by having more "family time" (ie. limiting other responsibilities like house cleaning etc.)?

BTW, we have about 17 more years (scary!) of raising our little ones, so I would try to put the feelings of "not raising your baby" in perspective . Of course I completely understand that you want to spend as much time with your baby at this point. Good luck with your decision, whatever your decide to do!