]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/jacqueline-novak-debut-comedy-album/feed/0We’re Back: Corey Feldman & Howard Sternhttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/were-back-corey-feldman-howard-stern/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/were-back-corey-feldman-howard-stern/#commentsFri, 11 Jul 2014 11:51:47 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8838It’s been a hot minute but DoucheChillz is back. Let’s not get all sentimental. We got work to do. Here’s the video that landed Howard Stern the judging gig on America’s Got Talent. It also got Corey Feldman a Grammy, Oscar and Tony. He’s only one Emmy away from an EGAT. It’s coming Corey don’t …

]]>It’s been a hot minute but DoucheChillz is back. Let’s not get all sentimental. We got work to do.

Here’s the video that landed Howard Stern the judging gig on America’s Got Talent. It also got Corey Feldman a Grammy, Oscar and Tony. He’s only one Emmy away from an EGAT. It’s coming Corey don’t worry.

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/were-back-corey-feldman-howard-stern/feed/0What I Wore This Week: $99,000 Car & $4.99 Nuggetshttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/what-i-wore-this-week-99000-car-4-99-nuggets/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/what-i-wore-this-week-99000-car-4-99-nuggets/#commentsMon, 09 Sep 2013 19:47:05 +0000Giuliahttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8467Hi! I’m Giulia Rozzi, a very stylish fauxshionista. I came up with this great original never-been-done-before idea: post pics of me in my favorite outfit of the week! I hope my wardrobe inspires you as much as I have inspired me and myself. Hello hello! What a summer, I moved twice, I went through a break-up, I …

]]>Hi! I’m Giulia Rozzi, a very stylish fauxshionista. I came up with this great original never-been-done-before idea: post pics of me in my favorite outfit of the week! I hope my wardrobe inspires you as much as I have inspired me and myself.

Hello hello! What a summer, I moved twice, I went through a break-up, I stopped using Tom’s All Natural deodorant. So many changes and so little time to share all my amazing outfits. (Bad blogger, bad). So let’s get back to biz with this hot little number, the perfect get-up for one of the last summer days.

Top: Vintage ($5!!!)

Shorts: Urban Outfitters ($5!!!)

Shoes: Ecote

Bag: Hayden Harnett

Sunglasses: Betsey Johnson

First let’s call attention to the ovsies, I am indeed in front of McDonalds hence my smirk as I sniff the sweet sick smell that only McD’s can produce. Ahhh it smells like my childhood in which I ate like a beast but thanks to my parents stellar genetics (and the fact that I would vomit all the time when I was car sick or watched a scary movie) I remain a tiny kid despite my large appetite. At least 4 times a week I indulged in McDonald’s or Burger King (Burger King had better burgers, McDonald’s wins for nuggets, but at age 6 I’d take whatever I can get my high cholesterol hands on). As a child I was a picky eater (aka bratty asshole whose Italian parents set no nutritional boundaries and demanded fast food or nothing at all. Thankfully my pediatrician (RIP Dr Yessaian) advised my mom to just let me eat myself out of my junk food phase and then eventually I’d like normal people food (eventually being college). So in addition to eating large cheese pizza’s alone and platter’s of pork fried rice with gravy as a food court snack, I’d eat lots of burgers, fries AND nuggets. Not like on different trips I’d have the Happy Meal and a side of nuggets. And not only did I get all of that but I insisted my hamburger have pickles and ketchup only, NO MUSTARD forcing my dad who just worked all night and day (he is a maniac) to drive thru, order, then have to wait in his car in the lot for a speciality burger (fine, the guy can’t say “I’m proud of you” but he did get his little piggy her food fix). Where was I going with all this? Oh yea, for split second I thought about “tackling” (good God McDonald’s what is wrong with you) the $4.99 nugget deal for ol’ times sake, then I remembered that non-organic chicken is full of cancerous poison that bloats and rots your body, so NO THANKS! Back to my outfit…

I love love love this top. The colors are so bright and pretty and go great with my tan (yes I care about not getting nugget cancer but have no fear of skin cancer). I am big believer in balancing out your exposure in the sense that I chose this flowy top because I had on short shorts. I would not do short shorts with a tight crop top, unless I was working as a video ho (anyone hiring? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL kill me) Do the shorts give a touch of camel toe? Perhaps, but if an uncomfortable crotch wedgie is the price I must pay to show off my sticks then sign me up. (Did I mention I’m recently single?)

The jewels are my usually Giulia nameplate and Catherine Weitzman tiger necklace plus the addition of new Catherine Weitzman piece, the branch necklace. I love her designs so much.

I wear these booties so much I’m surprised they haven’t fallen apart. They are so comfy and go with just about everything- dresses, skirts, shorts, jeans, my inflatable sumo wrestler costume.

Ah my sweet sweet Hayden Harnett bag. My pal Brandy Barber turned me on to this local designer of quality leather goods. I love the gold hardware and it’s large city size. And I love that I got it for $225 half off during their end of season sale. More so I love that it’s one of the first bigger purchases (cut to home-owning grown-ups pointing and laughing at me) I’ve made NOT on a credit card. Cash money bitches, I’m almost an adult!

My Betsey Shades are one of my favorite things I own. They are big but not buggy and they are dark enough to hide my eyes so no one can see me crying at Starbucks.

Now here is where things got fun. During my professional modeling shoot (aka me saying to a friend “can you please just fucking take a few pics of me for my blog?” and friend saying “you’re so annoying, no one cares about your life bitch!”) we saw 2 cops laughing while a Porsche was being towed. Apparently some douche spent so much money on his car he didn’t have any money left to pay all his parking tickets. Of course we ran over to capture the irony.

Hahahahahahaha I’m wearing a $10 outfit and you’re getting towed HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (who wins here? I have no idea.) Then my pal and I screamed at the cops “how tiny do you think this guy who owns this car’s penis is?” then we all laughed, then I called and asked my parents if could borrow money again. AMERICA!

(ps. anyone know if Porsche guy is single? I’d like someone to get me another handbag).

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/what-i-wore-this-week-99000-car-4-99-nuggets/feed/0Prank Universityhttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/prank-university/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/prank-university/#commentsTue, 03 Sep 2013 17:56:16 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8460College isn’t just for learning how to be some nerd doctor. You got to pull some pranks like the yelling in someone’s face during class while wearing a banana suit prank. If a lecture hall full of students and a teacher don’t get the bit maybe they need to go back to funny class. First …

]]>College isn’t just for learning how to be some nerd doctor. You got to pull some pranks like the yelling in someone’s face during class while wearing a banana suit prank. If a lecture hall full of students and a teacher don’t get the bit maybe they need to go back to funny class.

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/prank-university/feed/2Gansta Jewelerhttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/gansta-jeweler/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/gansta-jeweler/#commentsThu, 29 Aug 2013 19:13:35 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8444It’s Middle-Aged Rapper Thursday! This is what happens when a jeweler has been pushed too far. BT DUBS: Previous Middle Aged Rapper Thursdays First visit to DoucheChillz.com? We’re brand new. We’re glad you’re here. We’d love you to join our mission. Wait, what is this site? See all music chillz Follow us at @douche_chillz and like us on Facebook …

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/gansta-jeweler/feed/0The Twerk Reporthttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/the-twerk-report/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/the-twerk-report/#commentsTue, 27 Aug 2013 18:41:30 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8439This just in! Twerking is exposed in this investigative journalism segment. Some reporters are brave enough to take the tough assignments. This is why local news is still vital to getting information to the people. First visit to DoucheChillz.com? What are douchechillz? What is this site? Visit the About page. Bookmark the all chillz page and stay …

]]>This just in! Twerking is exposed in this investigative journalism segment. Some reporters are brave enough to take the tough assignments. This is why local news is still vital to getting information to the people.

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/the-twerk-report/feed/0Tom McCaffrey: Billy Bob Thornton Sings About Brad Pitt’s Wifehttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/tom-mccaffrey-billy-bob-thornton-sings-about-brad-pitts-wife/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/tom-mccaffrey-billy-bob-thornton-sings-about-brad-pitts-wife/#commentsFri, 23 Aug 2013 15:21:57 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8425Billy Bob Thornton is an Academy Award winning screenwriter and an Academy Award nominated actor but did you also know he makes terrible music? This clip is cringe-inducing on many levels. First of all it’s not very good and secondly I’m assuming he’s singing about his then girlfriend Angelina Jolie. So when he says things …

]]>Billy Bob Thornton is an Academy Award winning screenwriter and an Academy Award nominated actor but did you also know he makes terrible music?

This clip is cringe-inducing on many levels. First of all it’s not very good and secondly I’m assuming he’s singing about his then girlfriend Angelina Jolie. So when he says things like ‘they all said we’d never make it’ it’s a bit embarrassing for everyone. He also keeps saying; ‘Angelina, what’s come between us?’ I’m thinking it was Brad Pitt. But possibly the worst/best part is the home footage of Billy horsing around with ‘Angelina’. I always wondered why she left Billy. Now I know the answer.

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/tom-mccaffrey-billy-bob-thornton-sings-about-brad-pitts-wife/feed/0Hip Hop 4 Kidzhttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/hip-hop-4-kidz/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/hip-hop-4-kidz/#commentsTue, 20 Aug 2013 18:01:56 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8413We need to teach the kids to be hip hop. They are the future! First visit to DoucheChillz.com? What are douchechillz? What is this site? Visit the About page. Bookmark the all chillz page and stay up to date with the latest chillz. Follow us on twitter @douche_chillz to stay abreast of all. Return from Hip Hop 4 Kidz to DoucheChillz.com homepage

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/hip-hop-4-kidz/feed/0User Submish: Misunderstood Geniushttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/user-submish-misunderstood-genius/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/user-submish-misunderstood-genius/#commentsThu, 15 Aug 2013 19:15:30 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8405This video comes from a DoucheChillz fan and it’s a good one. It’s an interview with Max Landis that will make you fall in love with him if you haven’t already. Who the heck is Max Landis? Max Landis is a director/screenwriter and son of John Landis, the famous director of classic comedy Blues Brothers 2000 …

]]>This video comes from a DoucheChillz fan and it’s a good one. It’s an interview with Max Landis that will make you fall in love with him if you haven’t already. Who the heck is Max Landis? Max Landis is a director/screenwriter and son of John Landis, the famous director of classic comedy Blues Brothers 2000 and the lesser known film The Blues Brothers. In this 18 minute long interview Max laments that the internet thinks that he’s a douche. Well, we’re huge fans after watching this. We might even watch that movie he made about kids who do some shit and then probably learn something about life.

Thanks to the Team DoucheChillz Army Warrior Commando (#TDCAWC), Michael, for emailing this video. All contributors are inducted into this elite club. Participate in the community! Submit something that gives you chillz and subscribe to the newsletter. We love you all.

]]>http://douchechillz.com/chillz/user-submish-misunderstood-genius/feed/0College The Musicalhttp://douchechillz.com/chillz/college-the-musical/
http://douchechillz.com/chillz/college-the-musical/#commentsWed, 14 Aug 2013 16:26:50 +0000Chrishttp://douchechillz.com/?p=8384College students can get a little nuts. These gals out crazied their whole class. First visit to DoucheChillz.com? What are douchechillz? What is this site? Visit the About page. Bookmark the all chillz page and stay up to date with the latest chillz. Follow us on twitter @douche_chillz to stay abreast of all. Return from College The Musical to DoucheChillz.com homepage