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10 June 2014 - Best Beer HQ

The best beer names in the world

Everyone has an opinion about what the best beer in the world is – but what about the best beer name?

Your mates at Best Beer HQ have taken the liberty of scouring the internet and the bottle shop, looking for the most outrageous, the funniest and the cleverest beer names in the world. What we’ve come up with is a long-list of more than 50 beers with the best names.

Because breweries are constantly coming up with new beers, we’ll update this list as and when we discover a new brew with a great name.

The funniest, cleverest, best beer names in the world…

Alimony Ale

The self-styled “bitterest brew in America” is an American-style IPA by Buffalo Bill’s Brewery in Hayward, California.

Apocalypse Cow

A double IPA-style beer brewed by Three Floyds Brewing Co. in Munster, Indiana.

Arrogant Bastard Ale

Is Arrogant Bastard Ale a beer for arrogant bastards? Or is it an arrogant beer that thinks it’s better than everybody else? Either way, this American strong ale beer by Stone Brewing Co makes the list of best-named beers.

Bad Elf

You’ve seen Bad Santa, now try some Bad Elf. It’s an English-style India pale ale brewed by Ridgeway Brewing in Stoke, United Kingdom.

Bananas And Blow

Unsurprisingly, Bananas and Blow is a fruit beer. It’s brewed by Shorts Brewing Co. in Bellaire, Michigan. It’s also a song by Ween.

Baron Von Awesome

We hope the beer is as good as the name. Piece Brewery & Pizzeria in Chicago makes a wheat ale called Baron Von Awesome.

Blithering Idiot

You’re a blithering idiot if you don’t think this English barleywine-style beer by Weyerbacher Brewing Co. has one of the best beer names.

Bouncing Czech

With “more hops than a one legged rabbit”, Bouncing Czech is a pilsener beer brewed by Boundary Road Brewery in New Zealand.

Buster Nut Brown Ale

You’ve got to love the adolescent humour behind the naming of this English brown ale, brewed by Ska Brewing Co.

Chocolate Rain

Chocolate Rain is an American double/imperial stout brewed by Californian brewery The Bruery. Appropriately, it’s made with cocoa nibs and vanilla beans added during the beer brewing process.

Collaboration Not Litigation

There’s a good little story behind the name of this beer: when US brewers Russian River and Avery Brewing discovered that they were both putting out a beer called Salvation, rather than fight it out in court they decided to collaborate. The result is this Belgian strong ale.

Crazy Ivan

A crazy ivan is a sharp turn made by a Russian submarine in The Hunt for Red October and a Belgian ale beer by Bear Republic Brewing Company in Healdsburg, California.

Dad’s Little Helper Malt Liquor

A malt-liquor beer brewed by Rogue Ales in Newport, Oregon.

Donkey Punch

If you don’t know what a donkey punch is, then we suggest you Google it – because it’s far too explicit for us to describe here. Donkey Punch is – or was, because the brewery has since changed its name to Wild Donkey Brewing – a brewery in California.

Druid Fluid

Druid Fluid is an American barleywine-style beer brewed, aptly enough, by a brewery called Middle Ages Brewing Co.

Duck Duck Gooze

Duck Duck Goose is a game that children play. Duck Duck Gooze is an American wild ale style of beer by The Lost Abbey in San Marcos, California.

Effinguud

Read this one out loud. Effinguud is a sweet stout beer by Flying Monkeys.

Evil Dead Red

At Best Beer HQ, we love The Evil Dead. Any beer named after the cult horror film by Sam Raimi is tops in our book. It’s an amber ale made by AleSmith Brewing Company in San Diego.

Faceplant

Faceplant is a Weizen Bock beer by Bayern Brewing in Montana, USA.

Gargamel Ale

Any Smurfs fans in the house? Didn’t think so – but this is still a fantastic name for a beer. Allagash’s Gargamel Ale is an American wild ale style beer.

Haulin’ Oats Stout

Hop Whore

Hoptimus Prime

Transform and roll out… a double IPA brewed by Ruckus Brewing Company in New York, New York. See the beer label at the top of the page.

I Want You (Wee So Heavy)

A play on the song “I want you (she’s so heavy)” by The Beatles, I Want You (Wee So Heavy) is appropriately a wee heavy style of beer by Minneapolis Town Hall Brewery.

Ill Tempered Gnome

A winter-warmer style beer with an equally cool label featuring an angry gnome, brewed by Oakshire Brewing in Oregon, USA.

Irish Death

Another beer with a cool beer label, Irish death is a dark, strong ale brewed by Iron Horse Brewery in Ellensburg, Washington.

Lumpy Gravy

This craft beer by Lagunitas Brewing Company is named after the Frank Zappa album of the very same name and actually features him on the label.

Mama’s Little Yella Pils

Full points for creativity. This is a pilsener brewed by Oskar Blues Grill & Brew over in the States.

Moloko Milk Stout

Have you seen the classic Kubrick film A Clockwork Orange? If you have, then you’ll fall in love with the name of this Baltic milk stout brewed by those marketing geniuses over at Three Floyds Brewing Co. (also see Apocalypse Cow, above) in Indiana.

Nut Sack Ale

Another silly, adolescent name that makes us smile. Nut Sack Ale is brewed by Engine 15 Brewing Company in Florida.

Old Horizontal

A barley-wine beer by Victoria Brewing Company in Downington, Pennsylvania. Don’t tip Old Horizontal horizontal or you’ll spill it.

Old Leghumper

Old Leghumper by Thirsty Dog is an American porter. We love the name and the women’s’ legs on the beer label.

Old Ringworm

Not as alluring is the name “Old Ringworm” – a beer by McNeills Brewery in Brattleboror, Vermont.

Panty Peeler

And we’re back to alluring beer names again… Panty Peeler is a Belgian-style tripel brewed by Midnight Sun Brewing Co.

Pigs Ass Porter

Polygamy Porter

The beer with arguably the best tagline in the biz: why just have one?! That tagline helps make Polygamy Porter – a porter brewed by Utah Brewers Cooperative – one of the best-named beers on the planet.

Sappy Slappy Bastard

A Scotch ale by Founders Brewing Company in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

Smell The Glove

We’re not sure we want to. Named in honour of the fictional album of the same name by mock heavy-metal band Spinal Tap, this American porter-style beer by Old Dominion Brewing Company is certainly one of the most distinctive names on this list.

Smells Like Weed IPA

Does this beer by Dark Horse Brewing Co. actually smell like weed? Somebody let us know.

Smooth Hoperator

There’s a lot of cool beer names out there that play on the word “hop” (see Hoptimus Prime, above). This is one of the best – a Doppelbock beer by Stoudts Brewing Co. in Pennsylvania.

Snake Venom

The aptly named Snake Venom by Scottish craft brewery Brewmeister is currently the world’s strongest beer at a whopping 67.5%.

Streaking The Quad

Substance Abuse

It’s probably not politically correct but, in our opinion, Substance Abuse is one of the best beer names around. It’s an imperial stout brewed by Terrapin Beer Company in Athens, Georgia.

Tactical Nuclear Penguin

Scottish craft brewer BrewDog (which just opened its first shop in London) has created a beer with a name so silly that it’s a masterpiece. Introducing Tactical Nuclear Penguin, an imperial stout that, at 32%, was formerly the world’s strongest beer.

Tastes Like Burning (Ralph Wiggum’s Revenge)

Fans of The Simpsons will enjoy this beer’s name. No-one else will want to try a beer that supposedly “tastes like burning”. It’s a smoked beer by Ithaca Beer Company in New York.

The Dude’s Oat Soda

No doubt The Dude abides by this oatmeal stout by Brewery Ommegang in New York. If you don’t get the reference then you’re got to see The Big Lebowski – do it right now!

The Men’s Room

A red ale brewed by Elysian Brewing Company in Seattle. Hope it isn’t brewed in a men’s toilet.

Three Sheets Barleywine

You’ll be three sheets to the wind if you drink too much of this barleywine beer by Ballast Point Brewing Company in San Diego.

Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right BA Select

Veteran video gamers will know the Konami code when they see it. To everyone else, this brown ale by Dogfish Head Brewery just has a really long and meandering name.

Vampire Blood

Vampires are so cool right now. Vampire Blood is an English pale ale by Sprecher Brewing Company in Wisconsin. We bet it goes down about as well as any beer will with the Twilight and True Blood fan girls.