Hey All...

...Your Mama and our boozy b.f.f. Fiona Trambeau finally made it out to Joshua Tree after numerous annoying mishaps and frustrating snafus including an irksome tire issue that necessitated a stop-in at the BMW dealership in Alhambra, CA.

Adding insult to injury, Fiona's step-mother Virgina Slim promised Your Mama that her wireless internet was up and running but–surprise!–when we arrived it was not and it still is not. So, here we sit, in Yucca damn Valley pilfering the wireless internet at Starbucks.

We hope to have the internet issue at Ginny's trailer resolved as soon as possible and at that point we will jump back in the celebrity real estate saddle and ride. Until then, have some patience, puppies. Iffin any of ya'll feel compelled to piss, moan, whine and/or bellyache just remember that we are in no mood to navigate hostility; Our response to any complaints today is that you can stick a damn bowling ball up your butt. Okay?

Now then, we're off to Wal-Mart to get ol' Fiona some outfits and a frilly dress for Ginny's weddin' to and Pablo (or Pedro or Pancho or whatever his name is) because of course, she traveled light with only the tube top on her back, a pair of entirely impractical Lucite wedge heels on her feet and $7.81 in the pocket of her soiled lemon yellow pedal pushers.