For a looong time it felt to me like a gay problem but since I talk about it lots of hetero friends tell me the same thing. And I got to the point where I believe that’s two completely different things: having random sex or finding the one.
For finding random sex Grindr, Romeo, tinder etc work very well – but because they work so well for sex and it’s expected to have all the sexy pics it’s hard to have a proper talk about something else. And for finding the one you need to find a way of connecting beyond dick pics.
So maybe a platform where you actually chat without any sexy pics appear might work. Maybe a dating platform without pictures altogether would be the solution. So all people on that platform would be willing to write a proper profile, and talk about common interests and could maybe match. Without the hard gatekeeper of „you’re not sexy enough“.

(The best relationships I had were with guys I didn’t have very good sex with. And that was okay, because it is something different to have sex or to have someone to talk, cuddle and share your life with.)

It’s interesting to see how everyone makes really different experiences on those dating apps. I for my part managed to have lovely dates with guys who were looking for more than just sex on Grindr, Scruff and Tinder. It depends a bit on how you present yourself on those apps and what kind of people you approach there. It also requires a certain amount of patience and persistence I would say. Some people don’t appear to have a lot of that these days. I managed to make friends through the apps with guys who I ended up not having a sexual or romantic chemistry with, but generally got along with very well. And ultimately I met my now husband through Tinder. I’ve heard from a few couples who have been together for long who met on apps. It’s not at all an impossibility.

I found my last boyfriend on Romeo and we were together for 1.5 years. Sure, it is possible but to me it doesn’t seem very likely. It’s hard to filter profiles by common interests or similar believes when they basically show naked bodies.
It is possible but it needs a huge amount of time and try and error to find the people who are more interested in you than in your body.