Using the “Yellow Pages” Telephone Directory, identify nearby market selling already cooked, rotisserie or barbecued chickens.
Using the telephone, call the market to ascertain that the chicken is kosher or organic.
Using the GPS, map a route from your home (or other starting position) to the market.
Enter car and turn the key in the ignition.
Drive to market.
Using cash or credit card, purchase chicken (Note: this recipe may be enlarged with no changes. Buy sufficient chickens for the number of people you plan to serve.)
Drive home.
Put chicken (or chickens) on platter.
Eat.

History:

You may be interested in knowing that this recipe has been in my family for many generations. In the Russian shtetl, my great-grandmothers, and great-great grandmothers, and great-great-great grandmothers used this method. The only difference was that in lieu of a GPS, they navigated by following the wagon-wheel ruts in the dirt path.