The Secret to a Successful Cover Letter

Take it from our guy, who applied for nearly 300 jobs in his quest for employment by alternating between these three cover letters, annotated here by Steven Provenzano, the president of Executive Career Services and author of Top Secret Executive Resumes. The results, like the mere two resulting prospects in this economy, may at once surprise and enable you.

Option One: All Hot Air

Dear Sir or Madam,

I hope this finds you well. I am responding to a job posting on [name of site] on [date posted] for the [name of position], and I'd like to submit my resume for your consideration.

For the past seven years I have been working as an editor in the publishing industry, conceiving and creating bold, original content for both print and web properties and interacting with the entertainment, fashion, literary, and public relations communities. I am now exploring new career options and I believe I am uniquely qualified for this position. My diverse practical experience, willingness to learn, and strong work ethic are just a few of my many strengths, and if given the opportunity, I would love to explain a little bit more about the professional and personal assets I would bring to the position.

Thank you very much for your consideration, and I look forward to discussing the issue with you at your earliest possible convenience.

Sincerely Yours,

Richard Dorment

The expert says: "It's great that this begins with the reason for sending the letter and resume: what type of work they're seeking. But the 'I'd like to submit' is passive, rather than the active tense; just state that you are sending or including your resume.

"The second paragraph needs to be broken into two. And remove the "little bit" — it sounds weak, passive, and apologetic.

"Also, this needs specific information in the first or second paragraph about the company receiving the resume — what the applicant knows, specifically, about their products, services, markets, etc., and why the applicant is seeking to work with them, above anyone else."

Experience says: This letter led to two interviews. Not too groundbreaking, obviously, but not too shabby, either.

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Option Two: All Business

To Whom It May Concern,

I am responding to the job posting on [name of site] on [date posted] for the [name of position]. I have attached my resume for your consideration, and I would like to set up an appointment to interview for the position.

Thank you very much.

Regards,

Richard Dorment

The expert says: "This is way too short and doesn't tell me about your personality, except that you're too busy — or lazy — to write a decent letter. This tells me you're not highly motivated to get any job, know little about my company, and can't articulate your skills. If you have any, that is."

Experience says: That the expert is right. No employers responded to this cover letter.

Option Three: Just Plain Folksy

Hello [name],

Wanted: [name of position]. Found: The perfect candidate — me. Just take a look at my attached resume and you'll see why.

Okay, so I know what you're probably thinking: What does a guy who's spent seven years in publishing know about [name of position]? But I'll tell you what: I'm exploring new career options, and I'm a hard worker, a quick learner, and I'm great with [relevant skill (i.e. hands, computers, etc.)]. I also have a strong set of people skills — I get along with everybody — that would make me a valuable addition to your team.

Give me a shot and you won't be sorry. Many thanks for your consideration, and please let me know if you have a moment to talk.

All the best,

Richard Dorment

The expert says: "The 'perfect candidate'? Good grief. This whole letter smacks of conceit and arrogance. Would you want to work with this person? And the 'give me a shot' at the end is cheesy and unprofessional. I wouldn't call this person no matter what their resume looked like, not how qualified they were."

Experience says: This letter led to five of the author's seven interviews, making it the most successful style by far. Go figure.

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