Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Worst Song Ever UPDATE

SISQO HAS TAKEN THE AWARD FOR WORST SONG EVER!

Not much of a surprise. I have to admit I voted for "Summer Girls" because when I hear that song I want to use mind powers to take control of every city bus in Cleveland and have them simultaneously converge on their faces. But the "Thong Song" was right behind them for me.

And is the picture above the most awkward thing ever? "The Man Behind The Thong"??? I hope at no point in my life does the phrase "The Man Behind The Thong" make sense. I can handle "The Man Behind The Destruction of Nickelback" or "The Man Behind The Swedish Bikini Team" but nothing with a thong. Right now, "The Man Behind in His Credit Card Payments" is much more relevant - and still better than the Thong thing.

Mambo #5 was a bit of a surprise for your Handsome Narrator. I mean I hate that song - but in reading the comments it sounded like quite a few people liked it - and ol' Lou Bega still pulled in the second most votes. I think this song should be left off the list because I can't help but giggle when he yells "MAMBO NUMBA FI!" He never says "Five" always just "FI!" This is important because I'm a busy man and only using half of words could hel sa me ti.

Hanson finished a solid fourth and lets face it - that damn song is kind of catchy. Plus they used my girlfriend Samaire Armstrong in their video for "Penny and Me" so I automatically couldn't vote for them (I mean I sat through two whole seasons of The OC for her - I can handle a three minute pop song). Also, they have to live with being "Hanson" for the rest of their lives - which can't be good. I can't imagine telling a girl at a bar that you wrote "Mmm Bop" helps you get laid. The normal reaction has to be a lot of cheek pinching and shame.

Crazy Town getting the least amount of votes surprised me for the fact that their singer's name is Shifty Shellshock. If I was going to make up a name for myself it would definitely be cooler than Shifty Shellshock. I mean he could be Danger McDermot or Bullet Sanders or Turd Ferguson and he chose Shifty Shellshock? What can you expect for this guy:

So without further adieu I present Sisqo with his trophy for Worst Song Ever -

Anybody out there watching "I Love the New Millennium" on VH-1?! I'm completely addicted to those shows. Anyway, Sisqo gets tons of air time in his segment about chicks he would like to see in a thong. Yuck.