Three-game series almost lost in circus that is Miami

MIAMI – When Astros leadoff man Jordan Schafer steps into the box Friday night against Marlins pitcher Ricky Nolasco, such will begin what feels like a minor subplot in this season’s hottest new drama.

That’s right, the ballgame reduced to near nothingness by a quintessentially Miami series of episodes complete with shady characters and new debacles seemingly every week. The latest of course being manager Ozzie Guillen’s five-game suspension for comments he made to Time magazine, praising part of Fidel Castro’s legacy – an absolute bomb in a city full of Cuban exiles and their descendants.

Even beyond that, the story of the Marlins is sensational in every way, perhaps made more bizarre only by the levels to which this franchise was ignored in its own market since its 1993 inception. That’s even through two World Series titles, neither of which registered more than a lapse in the apathy that plagued the franchise.

But with turning 19 years old, as we all know, comes rebellion and the desire to move out of the house.

So they shed their name. The generic Florida Marlins became the Miami Marlins. Generic outfielder Mike Stanton – really generic, considering there have been three Mike Stantons in baseball – became exotic Giancarlo Stanton (his true first name).

Cloak and dagger

And they moved out of their decrepit football-style home to new digs. Rising rudely out of humble Little Havana, the pseudo-spacecraft is a perfect example of the two Miamis: as flashy a venue as you’d find in any city in America amid some of its most impoverished neighborhoods.

For the moment, it is called Marlins Park, the House that _________ built.

In another deliciously Miami twist, the Securities and Exchange Commission is trying to figure out how to fill in that blank of who did pay for it. The SEC is in the midst of investigating the stadium financing, a probe involving the team and its wealthy owner, as well as Miami-Dade County.

Owner Jeffrey Loria had always been the purported villain of this morality play, using taxpayer dollars to fund his plaything, complete with fish tanks and a gaudy sculpture to celebrate home runs that screams Miami as loudly as the oranges and blues of the new uniforms.

But in the most drastic plot twist to date, the role of villain changed this week with Guillen’s comments that shook the capital of Latin America to its 50-year-old sediment.

When the Astros touched down in Miami on Thursday, they were entering, to put it in a language Miamians and Houstonians know too well, the eye of the storm.

Nobody in a city that’s more than 30 percent Cuban or Cuban-American stood outside protesting, a drastically different scene from when Guillen held his apology news conference simultaneous with the suspension coming down.

“IDIOTA… NO MAS EXCUSAS,” one sign read. Another asked if Guillen would be employed if he had made those remarks about Adolf Hitler.

A brief respite

Thursday, things were all calm under the brand-new big top. The Miami Herald had nothing on the front page about Guillen, focusing instead on another perfectly Miami story – one that involved bribery and a South Beach nightclub.

Nothing on the sports page either. The sport the town ignored even more than baseball the past two decades was getting its moment in the sun, with the NHL’s Panthers set to end their eternal playoff drought Friday.

Close to it in the Spanish-language El Nuevo Herald, too, except for an editorial vaguely inspired by Guillen about bridging gaps between generations of Cubans.

The storm will whip again, probably as soon as tonight. Even in Guillen’s absence, the mark last week’s comments left on this city will take longer than days to go away.By the way, a game

For three days, the Astros will be a nice distraction from the rest of the mess and from the glitz of Marlins Park, fittingly accentuated on its opening night with showgirls leading the pregame introductions.

If nine innings aren’t enough for you, Miami can always offer that glamorous touch to go with deceipt, a months-on-the-job betrayal of a community, and perhaps white-collar crime, all surrounded by breathtaking poverty.

Oh, and a Daddy Yankee concert. The Puerto Rican pop megastar is the featured attraction Friday at the ballpark that can never go without one.

Play ball. Or something.

zachary.levine@chron.com
twitter.com/zacharylevine

Photo: Karen Warren / Chronicle

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Astros players, wearing Colts .45s uniforms, line up for the National Anthem. They wore the uniforms to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the first game in Houston franchise history.

Astros players, wearing Colts .45s uniforms, line up for the National Anthem. They wore the uniforms to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the first game in Houston franchise history.

Photo: Karen Warren / Chronicle

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Junction Jack greets fans while wearing a Colt .45s jersey.

Junction Jack greets fans while wearing a Colt .45s jersey.

Photo: Karen Warren / Chronicle

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Astros manager Brad Mills (2) greets former Colts .45s Bob Aspromonte on the 50th anniversary of the first game in Houston franchise history on April 10, 1962.

Astros manager Brad Mills (2) greets former Colts .45s Bob Aspromonte on the 50th anniversary of the first game in Houston franchise history on April 10, 1962.