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Susan H. wrote:Hi Ana, hi all, thank you so much for your answers! I am an introvert and struggling with going out there. Last year when I was invited to an on-site interview in the UK (great job at a medium Pharma company) I even didn't contact a very nice business acquaintance upfront who actually (still) works there (and I didn't get a job offer). We had known each other from a successful and pleasant collaboration when I was still working at a contract manufacturer. I would have hated him thinking that I wanted to exploit our relationship. There is probably s.th. wrong with me, but I have to live with that. So I am looking for other ways to call attention to my skills. And I feel the following dilemma: people need some time to appreciate me/see my advantages, which means I should probably not change companies so often, but at the same time I crave for new beginnings in order to change. Any thoughts?

Hi Susan H,

Never feel as though you exploiting your collaborative relationship by asking for a Network contact or reference. Contextualize that relationship you mentioned for a Moment - is that Person a best friend hwho you routinely go out for Drinks with, or vacation with, or share familty time with? If not then that Person is not a friend - in your personal life, that Person is a nothing.

That Person is a professional relationships to whom you can leverage in a professional matter and such request to serve as a refferal provided a postive collaborating experience is on the Basis of professional courtesy. So never hold back, cause certainly others are doing so.

One Thing you can look at is your interviewing skills - can you get an external view on how you are performing?

Some may oppose to interview coaches but in your case you may wish to consider one just to get some professional help. I did it a Long time ago to Supplement help I was getting from friends/Network contacts and I learned a few pearls which I still carry to this day. Its one to Thing to read about interview technique, ist another to actually practice and get yourself mentally prepared to experess and communicate your value. Sometimes that is not a solo or Amateur excercise.