Criminals and fatties: come and join the British
Army .........

added 26/12/08

We usually have to catch up with the Americans on the
latest craze and so it is again this time, as the Army
prepares to spend twenty million of our pounds on a
campaign to recruit hitherto undesirable types.

The US Army has been hiring felons for some time now,
many believe to produce a morally-deficient force that
can be used against the people in a state of martial
law, and now the Ministry of Defence wants to solve
our soldier shortage this way.

The Daily Mail reports,
"As well as lowering the barrier to allow more
ex-offenders to join, the Army is considering accepting
criminals freed from prison on licence - meaning they
can be sent back to jail if they breach parole conditions."

The British Army - fighting the enemy
flab.

Tattoos on hands and necks will be acceptable, giving
a new meaning to military tattoos.

Overweight people have also been given the chance to
become cannon fodder in the next war for oil:

"Plumper soldiers may also soon be the norm, as
the review looks to relax standards on Body Mass Index,
allowing more overweight youngsters to start initial
training."

"In 2006, the Army raised the BMI barrier for
male recruits from 28 to 32 - two points above the World
Health Organisation's definition of clinically obese.
Army insiders insist the changes will not lead to poor-quality
soldiers on the frontline, as all recruits must reach
the same high standards by the end of their training."

Hopefully the overweight soldiers will be given adequate
body armour, unlike some of their slimmer predecessors
who paid for Government scrimping with their lives.