Neat-O result, week ending 4th August

It was truly difficult choosing just one winner from all those bloody awful, gut-wrenching contributions.

Eventually, I decided to give the prize to Scronnyglonkle for telling it like it is, with his double-groan-inducing "Worlds most boring couple return from holiday, full details instore". I can hardly bear the thought of it.

Over to you, Scronnyglonkle.

Equally important, however, the coveted Neat-O productivity award goes to Sydalg. Well done, Syd. I'm sure you confused the hell out of a lot of casual visitors to the Writers' Room.