…we’re not defined by these things, yet they become our mental constructs.

So when we move on from one, or it gets pulled away — we go back to these everlasting questions:

Who am I?

What am I here for?

The Gap

It’s of utmost importance to spend time alone once a part of your life has been transformed, changed, extracted — whatever you want to call it.

It’s tempting to fill our days with non stop action, avoiding the painful realization that things are different and seeking to numb those feelings of loss.

Yet, no matter how much you run around, you can’t escape the feelings and those need to pass through you.

That is why when you leave your executive job after a decade, it’s notwise to jump right back into a new project …instead, taking time to create space and creating experiences that allow you to connect to who you really are, are crucial.

Shifting Our Imagination

By far, the most important benefit of letting go is the creation and freeing up of time, energy, physical and mental space and the ability to allow something new and powerful to come in.

Because we become so focused on what isn’t anymore, it can constrict our ability to be open to new experiences, people, places and perspectives once our energy is no longer consumed by something.

This, too, can be uncomfortable …yet many times we can’t even imagine what our new reality may look like.

But then we fast forward 6 months, a year, 3 years and realize that there was a perfect order all along, and that we could have never imagined where we are today.

We simply weren’t capable of dreaming or believing or seeing this new reality, and that can’t be learned or trained, it has to be trusted and surrendered to.

Surrendering means giving up control and completely detaching from the way you think things should be, or even could be.

Last Words

Look around your life and start to become aware of something you’ve been clinging on to that is no longer serving you.

Maybe it’s a small thing, such as a habit, or a way of being, or being involved in a social circle that you know isn’t for you.

Become aware of it and then have the courage to let go…because you’ll never imagine what’s on the other side.

For more insights, lessons and practical action steps to create you’ve been dreaming of, listen to the Resist Average Academy on iTunes, Stitcher or Web.

How deep transformation is always on the other side of painful change.

Let’s face it, we’ve all held on for way too long…

Maybe it was a relationship, a stepping stone in our career that became a prison or a way of being that we simply started to think it was who we were.

In this post, I’ll address why we have so much trouble letting go and how to surrender and trust to the transformative power of change, taking us to places we could have never imagined.

The Day I Broke Off A Part Of Myself

I walked into my office that morning, and it looked like a jail cell.

Where pictures once adorned the space, it was empty…and the walls were bare.

This square, windowless box was a place where I had poured my heart and energy out for what seemed like decades.

It was a place where:

I crafted huge visions.

I had brutally tough conversations.

I had life changing insights with others.

I could retreat and collect myself.

Furthermore, it felt like family, as odd as that may sound — I’d spent so many holidays, weekends, sunday mornings and late nights there.

This was the last time I’d be here and I let it out…uncontrollable emotions, knowing I had moved on from this little room in this massive gym and community I had created, yet I had let go of.

Who We Believe Ourselves To Be

Time is a powerful force and compounds the effect something has on our lives simply by building layers.

Every few months, another layer is built, and another.

These layers begin to become our identity or who we believe ourselves to be.

…we’re not defined by these things, yet they become our mental constructs.

So when we move on from one, or it gets pulled away — we go back to these everlasting questions:

Who am I?

What am I here for?

The Gap

It’s of utmost importance to spend time alone once a part of your life has been transformed, changed, extracted — whatever you want to call it.

It’s tempting to fill our days with non stop action, avoiding the painful realization that things are different and seeking to numb those feelings of loss.

Yet, no matter how much you run around, you can’t escape the feelings and those need to pass through you.

That is why when you leave your executive job after a decade, it’s not wise to jump right back into a new project …instead, taking time to create space and creating experiences that allow you to connect to who you really are, are crucial.

Shifting Our Imagination

By far, the most important benefit of letting go is the creation and freeing up of time, energy, physical and mental space and the ability to allow something new and powerful to come in.

Because we become so focused on what isn’t anymore, it can constrict our ability to be open to new experiences, people, places and perspectives once our energy is no longer consumed by something.

This, too, can be uncomfortable …yet many times we can’t even imagine what our new reality may look like.

But then we fast forward 6 months, a year, 3 years and realize that there was a perfect order all along, and that we could have never imagined where we are today.

We simply weren’t capable of dreaming or believing or seeing this new reality, and that can’t be learned or trained, it has to be trusted and surrendered to.

Surrendering means giving up control and completely detaching from the way you think things should be, or even could be.

Last Words

Look around your life and start to become aware of something you’ve been clinging on to that is no longer serving you.

Maybe it’s a small thing, such as a habit, or a way of being, or being involved in a social circle that you know isn’t for you.

Become aware of it and then have the courage to let go…because you’ll never imagine what’s on the other side.

For more insights, lessons and practical action steps to create you’ve been dreaming of, listen to the Resist Average Academy on iTunes, Stitcher or Web.