A Spiritual Journey (part 1) ~ Illness and imaginary friends

I have decided to share experiences and a potted history here about my personal Spiritual Journey. Obviously I can only speak for myself and of my own experiences, but I hope that in doing so, it may help you (or someone else) to develop your an understanding of Spirit, the ways Spirit seek to connect with us, and the different ways you can strengthen your link with Spirit, if you choose to.

What is important to remember, is there is no right or wrong way. Some of us may be given very gentle nudges; others seemingly more challenging or profound experiences. We are all individuals, and without doubt, Spirit know the most appropriate way for each of us.

People often ask me “When, or how did you know you could connect with Spirit?” In all honesty, I find that a very difficult question to answer … It was nothing that ever crossed my mind. It may sound odd, but looking back I honestly think I have always had Spirit around me.

As a baby I was born full term, but weighing around only 2lbs, with loads of things seriously ‘wrong’ with me. This was 1970, so obviously the medical care was not as advanced as it is today. My parents weren’t able to hold me until I was well over ten weeks old. I was Christened at two days, as I was not expected to survive … indeed during my early days, I clinically died twice … Doctors remain at a loss as to how I inconceivably returned to the land of the living – not once, but twice!! Even today, there are occasionally children born with issues very similar, to myself, who are returned to Spirit as young babies or children. My heart goes out to them, and of course their families, and at times I quietly wonder ‘Why me?’ …Why did I survive? I feel now it is because I am to use my experiences to help others … Mediumship Heals hurts and supports others.

My first year of life was literally spent in Leeds General Infirmary, in an incubator. I wasn’t allowed any toys in with me (for fear of contamination I presume) but I would spend my time gazing through the clear incubator walls at my precious Teddy, who was always there for me. He has been my most trusted companion through life probably!! At around a year, when I was finally allowed home, (with the Community Nurse calling several times a day), my parents were overjoyed … and then quickly devastated as I was rushed back into hospital three days later, where I stayed a few more months.

I continued into childhood a very poorly, sickly child, with frequent stays in and trips to Hospital … seeing one Specialist after another – Heart, Lungs, Throat, Liver, Kidneys, Eyes, Ears … you name it I was there for it at one time or another. I grew to hate it!! Unsurprisingly, my parents were incredibly protective of me. Frustratingly for me, especially when I started school, there were many things I wasn’t allowed to do … they may be too tiring for me, or I may hurt myself. So from an early age, I often felt different and excluded from my peers. I was very tiny when I started school (aged nearly 5, I was wearing clothes for 18 month old babies, and reportedly looked like one of those dolls that could walk and talk!!) I was very quiet rather than shy, and did find making friends at school quite difficult.

But that didn’t matter too much to me … as a young girl I used to have friends that apparently no one else could see … One stands out, a little girl, Margaretta who I met when I was around 6 years old. She was a little older and much taller than me, and dressed in old fashioned clothes, Victorian clothes and wore her hair in ringlets. We would spend hours chatting away together, and playing with my dolls and teddies and other toys; she said her toys were different and that she didn’t have so many of them. Margaretta and I saw each other most days and she would sometimes come to school with me. She told me that when she went to the school with her other friends, it was colder and that when she came to school with me it was a lot warmer, and the Teachers much kinder. Margaretta and I were friends for 3+ years I think, until I was around 9/10 years old. I used to get very upset when my Mum refused to set a place for her at the family table, and when she told me that I was being silly and just imagining things. I knew I wasn’t though, and was very sad when I realised that Margaretta was no longer around me.

As I grew older, there were other Spirit friends I had, each very different and who gave me different experiences and guidance or support. (I will talk about Emily in part 2)

What I find interesting, is that I have learned there are various ages/stages where Spirit are more likely to try and make themselves known to someone. Spirit are always very giving and to their best to bring us comfort. I am sure that Margaretta knew that I was lonely as a young child, but also very accepting of Spirit, and this is why we became friends.

Babies and young children are much closer to the vibration of Spirit; not tainted by Life experience. Have you noticed how babies are often seen gazing into ‘thin air’, chuckling/smiling? They’re acknowledging the closeness of a loving Spirit. Youngsters often have ‘invisible friends’. They’re not invisible, but very real to that child. I feel the best way to react is be accepting, be led by your child and not negate their experience. Perhaps the real reason Spirit children particularly, spend time around babies/children, is because they don’t question; they accept with joy, the loving presence of Spirit. There’s no fear, no rationality to battle with.