Nfl

Tackle Eric Fisher from Central Michigan holds up the team jersey after being selected first overall by the Kansas City Chiefs in the first round of the NFL football draft, Thursday, April 25, 2013 at Radio City Music Hall in New York. (AP Photo/Jason DeCrow)

There is no question that the most fascinating nonevent event in sports every year is the NFL Draft. It isn't a game, there is no clear winner, yet it attracts a huge television audience, especially for the first round.

The only such thing that can compare with it is the announcement of the NCAA Tournament bracket, but that nonevent is a distant second behind the draft.

Thursday night, the NFL proceedings had nearly two million more viewers than the NBA Playoffs, according to early research. That the NFL draws such attention is certainly no surprise, but it is still noteworthy. (One small stunner is that the highest-rated local TV market was Buffalo. ... Bet those folks were disappointed).

Perhaps the best part of the draft is the special lingo that is employed by all the suits sitting at the anchor desks, whether on ESPN or the NFL Network.

It's kind of like watching a Premier League soccer match with English announcers and trying to understand what they mean when they say stuff like "need a result" or "concede." But at least those guys are talking about a game being played in front of them, unlike the draft analysts who are chatting about stuff that "might" happen in years to come.

Oh, well, here are some of the more interesting things I saw, heard or thought during Round 1:

Why is it that a guy is too big a risk to take in the first round, but it's perfectly OK to take the same guy in the second or third round?

Best line: NFL Network's Rich Eisen noting that there won't be any kissing of the Lombardi Trophy at the Super Bowl this winter since it is being played in New Jersey in February. Don't want any "A Christmas Story" moments with tongues getting stuck to cold metal.

Mike Mayock is the best analyst in pro football, and he had his top moment Thursday night when he objected on the air to all the talk (by his co-workers) about Notre Dame's Manti Te'o, who was not selected in Round 1.

Did anyone else think it was a bit odd that all of the draft picks got bear hugs from Commissioner Roger Goodell? And some of those hugs were bordering on creepy long. NBA picks sure aren't getting that love from David Stern.

If anyone who has ever been involved in football at any level can tell me what any of these things mean, I'd love to hear: high motor, quick twitch muscles, plays with leverage, stiff hips, downhill runner, slow eyes.

Then there are the old reliables when the analysts have run out of things to say: "He's just a football player ... he has high intangibles."

Wow.

Those were some real nice suits and bling on display Thursday night. Just saying.

This just in, the Patriots traded all of their picks this year for many more picks in other years. Speaking of which, they must employ a guy just to keep track of which picks they have in what years.

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