Category: Math & Science

(I like buffalo wings, a lot. This fast food place has a 12-piece, 24-piece, and 48-piece options. I order 36 wings. The kid rings me up and tells me the price, which seems awfully high according to the board prices above and behind him.)

Me: “Why so much?”

Cashier: “We don’t have a 36-piece option, so I charged you for the 48.”

Me: “But you DO have a 24-piece option, and a 12-piece option. Doesn’t that make 36 total?”

(He stared at me a minute, then canceled the order and redid it, all without a word.)

(While pursuing my master’s, I’m working at a grocery store to make ends meet. One day I’m struggling to get a pallet jack working. The visiting regional manager is watching me, and growing frustrated. Finally, he decides to chew me out.)

Me: “I’m studying for my master’s in physics! ROCKET SCIENCE, I CAN DO!”

(Since I am having a rough day to begin with, my response is a little louder than he expects, and he is quite taken aback. But I must have had an effect because the next time he’s chewing someone out, this happens.)

Deli Worker: “Have a great day! There are free samples on the counter; help yourself!”

(The “free samples” consisted of four different deli bags with bar codes ripped off the labels, each containing a 0.5 to 0.75 pounds of meat or cheese. I think I know now what the deli does with the extra slices customers don’t want or need, and I have a clue as to why there were so many that day…)

(Our drawers only start with $75 in them. One of my first customers of the day gets a cash return for $63. I borrow the money from the store’s petty cash and put a note to pay it back when I have more bills in my drawer. Not long after that, somebody goes through the money transfer process and receives $100, which I also borrow from petty. About an hour and zero customers later, I’ve finished counting down the morning drawers and swapping out their smaller bills for any twenties, fifties or hundreds. The largest denomination left in my drawer or petty is tens. Almost immediately after, a man in his early 20s comes to my counter.)

Customer: “I’d like to cash this check, please!” *hands me a $362 check*

Me:*inwardly panics as the acting manager walks in. Our check cashing fee is hefty and usually a deterrent* “Um, the fee is two percent of the check. Is that okay?”

Customer:*cheerfully* “Oh, yeah, it’s always like five or seven bucks.”

Manager:*knows what I’ve been through at this point* “Can you borrow again?”

Me: “There’s no big bills left in petty; they’re all in the night deposit.”

Manager: “Hmm… let me check the lottery machine.”

(We have a machine on the floor across from us where people can buy scratch-offs or instant tickets. She empties the machine while I awkwardly stand there with the customer. She counts the smaller-than-hoped amount.)

Manager: “Only $258. You’ll have to borrow $100 from petty and take the difference from your drawer.”

(Eventually I get it straightened out and by the end of the night, everything is even. The next day, a different manager is working, and trying to piece together a weekly lottery audit he isn’t totally familiar with.)

Day Manager: “Hey, do you know by chance just how much money [Manager] pulled out of the lottery machine last night?”

Me:*in the process of helping a customer* “$258.”

Day Manager: “$258…?”

Me:*nods, finishing up with that customer*

Day Manager:*stares for a second and then laughs* “Okay, RAIN MAN.”

Me: “Hey, if you had to pull cash from three different places for ONE transaction, you’d remember, too!”