Happy marriages don't happen by accident. They require consistent work, commitment and dedication of the people involved.

Couples who have happy marriages have worked to get to where they are today. You don’t need to envy them. You just need to know the things you have to do to make your marriage a happy one and apply them to your relationship.

These 10 happy marriage tips will contribute value to your efforts to build a lasting and happy marriage. Bear them in mind.

1. Build trustTrust is the foundation of a happy marriage and it’s something you need to work at. Couples need to be determined not to flirt or get too close with members of the opposite sex to avoid destroying trust in their relationships. Doing this might make one party begin to view someone else as an alternative when their marriage goes through a rough patch. Having an alternative will weaken your resolve to make your marriage work.

2. Respect your spouseListen to your spouse when he or she talks to you. Mutual respect is vital for a happy marriage. When you give your mate your undivided attention it shows that you respect them and value what they have to say. If your spouse talks to you when you’re in the middle of something important, explain that you want to hear what they have to say and suggest a time when you’ll be able to pay better attention.

3. Have fun togetherFind thing that you enjoy doing together and then make time to do them. Exercise together, go on walks, or take on mutually enjoyable projects together. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you both have fun doing it. Spending time together enjoying each other’s company will strengthen your marriage and add another meaningful dimension to your relationship.

4. Don’t forget to smileA smile can do so much and requires so little effort. It has the power to lift someone’s spirits and it sets the stage for a pleasant reunion after a long and perhaps difficult day. If you want a happy marriage, lead with your smile and let that be the first impression you make when you relate with your partner.

5. Learn from the pastFigure out when to do, or not do, certain things. For example, if you find that you tend to be tense and cranky when you are hungry, minimize your conversation with your spouse during those times. Similarly, if you see that your spouse gets worked up whenever you mention the name of a certain person, don’t mention that person’s name unless absolutely necessary. Build a happy marriage by being smart enough to learn from the past.

6. Be polite to each otherWhen speaking with your partner, use phrases like please and thank you. Being polite should not be viewed as a formality. It is a way to honour your spouse. It helps them feel appreciated and respected too.Being courteous is like the oil that helps a happy marriage run smoothly and reduces unnecessary friction. If you can be polite to a stranger, then it should be even more important to be polite to your marriage mate.

7. Don’t keep scoresMarriage is not a contest, so keeping scores only hurts your relationship in the long run. You should build side-by-side with your partner. So unless your spouse is a total slacker, recognize that in a happy marriage both partners try to help their mate carry the load.

8. Overlook small thingsTrivial things destroy marriages. Wouldn’t it be ironic if a marriage was strong enough to stand up to all the big challenges, but couldn’t get past the minor irritations of daily life? Learn to view your partners little idiosyncrasies as entertaining rather than irritating. It works, so don’t sweat the small stuff. Overlook small things. Laugh over them and move on.

9. Respect your spouse’s privacyDon’t go through your partner’s things out of curiosity or in an effort to check up on them. You know it feels offensive to have your privacy violated instead of respected. So, don’t do that to your spouse. Don’t let a sense of insecurity cause you to become overly suspicious of your mate.On the other hand, being secretive can create suspicion. A happy marriage should be built on open and honest communication. So, if there is something you need to know, ask, don’t snoop. You should also be honest with your partner.

10. Don’t fight dirtyCouples who start fights with name-calling or personal criticisms are more likely to spiral out of control and are likely to be unhappy in their marriages than couples who have learned to fight neutrally. The most successful couples also know how to reduce their fights, either by asking for a break or using humour to defuse the tension.