Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I Know Who Made A Really, Really Bad Movie

The day that I thought would never come, the day that I dreamed about for AGES, has finally come ... at long last, the absolute and total death of Spederline has come upon us. Yesterday morn, Britney Spears and Kevin Federline's legal representatives met in court to finalize their divorce ... tho, the matter of child custody is still not totally decided upon. Truth be told in light of everything else going on in Britney's life, the moment isn't as sweet as I thought it would be. Here are pictures of Britney's no-nonsense lawyer Laura Wasser (who has no time to stop for photos) making her way into the courthouse yesterday, along with the Spederline signatures on the final divorce decree and a couple pics of Britney as a matrimonially free woman:

Troubled star Britney Spears is officially single again after her divorce from Kevin Federline is finally complete. "They are divorced," the pop star's attorney, Laura Wasser, said Monday after a Superior Court hearing. "Everything is finalized." The former pop star gave him a peek at what he is missing by wearing a very revealing vest during her latest outing in Los Angeles. Court Commissioner Scott Gordon signed orders for dissolution of marriage, an alimony agreement and child custody. The financial agreement will not be made public unless there is an enforcement issue, Wasser said. The child custody order was tentatively sealed, pending an Aug. 14 hearing. "The best interests of the children could be harmed" if the arrangement were not sealed, Gordon said ... Wasser said: "I think she's okay with the terms. I think both of them would prefer to have more custody, and that can be worked out down the line." Since February, Spears, 25, and Federline, 29, have shared joint custody of their two sons, 22-month-old Sean Preston and 10-month-old Jayden James. However, a source tells Us magazine Federline may still fight for full custody of the children in light of Spears recent wild antics. An insider said: "[Federline's] attorney Mark Vincent Kaplan...has been watching and monitoring Britney's behavior very closely. There is a clause in the divorce so either parent can seek full custody and it is very possible that you will see Kaplan seeking full custody for Kevin as early as this week. The source continued: "Kevin is extremely concerned with Britney's erratic behavior and he needs to make sure his kids are protected. Britney has not met the benchmarks for sobriety that [were] outlined in the agreement." So, while Britney is free from K-Fed in a married sense she will still have the rest of her life to contend with him when it comes to their children. Blah. When I imagined Britney coming to her senses and getting rid of Kevin (something I started dreaming about around the time they started dating, actually) I hoped that Britney would be enjoying a booming career with a least a couple new hit albums under her belt. Even tho she's finally free of him now, she is a long way away from having a booming career. I suppose it's best that she take one step at a time ... I just hope they continue to be steps in the right direction. [Source, Source]

In other Spears-related news, Alli Sims (Britney's sometime personal assistant and supposed cousin) is stepping up her bid for fame. Last week we were teased that her new "official site" was "coming soon" and, at long last, it has finally gone live at AlliSims.com:

Um. No. A quick visit to her site reveals that she has high aspirations to be a singer (you can hear her singing the song On My Own from Les Miserables ... badly) and upon further inspection, you can learn more about this fascinating woman in her biography -- which beings: The first thing to know about me is that I'm a Southern girl through and through. That's right, y'all ... she's country just like her cousin Britney! If you want more, you're gonna have to check out the site for yourself. You have yourself a good ol' time at AlliSims.com, ya hear? [Source]

While Cousin Alli is hard at work trying to make a name for herself, Heroes phenom Hayden Panettiere is hard at work trying to fish something out from inside the backside of her jeans on the set of her show:

I really hope that she did just lose something in there ... cuz if she's diggin' in there like there's no tomorrow for some other reason ... well, I think it's prolly a good idea that she get that thing checked out by a medical professional. [Source]

In other hard at work news, here are new pictures of Kylie Minogue as she leaves the set of the Dr. Who Xmas special that she has been filming recently:

She makes a sexy little maid, don't you think? I cannot wait to see how this Xmas special turns out. [Source]

Tyra Banks has returned from parts unknown, where she has been hard at work on her most favoritest project ever, to make a huge splash in New York City. Tyra has packed up her talk show and moved shop to the Big Apple and she wants everyone in Manhattan to know about it:

I know that NYC is capable of handling all kinds of fierceness but I'm not sure it's quite ready for Tyra's brand of fabooness. I just hope they can manage. [Source]

Elsewhere in NYC yesterday, Laura Bell, the star of the Broadway hit Legally Blonde: The Musical played the second of her 3 shows at Birdland nightclub where she performed tracks off her kickass Country music album Longing for a Place Already Gone. Here are a couple pics from last night's show:

Wee! I am so excited that she is doing these shows because I will be in NYC to catch her next (last?) solo performance at Birdland. While I love her in the role of Elle Woods in Legally Blonde, I am very anxious to hear her sang the hell out of her really fun Country album. I know, I know ... I am not a Country music fan but her album is way fun. I have a few things to take care of in NYC later on this month and one of them is to catch Laura Bell's next Birdland show on August 20th. In other Laura Bell news, iTunes is giving away free downloads of the song Omigod You GuysHERE from her hit Broadway show Legally Blonde: The Musical. These free download deals usually only last a week so get it while you can. I love the whole Original Broadway Cast Recording but you can't say no to a free song. [Source]

What's this?! Could this be the first picture of Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon together in close proximity since news broke that they were dating and then not-dating? Does this mean that they are dating again? And how come they've managed to elude being photographed together in the past?

This from TMZ: Hotties under the radar, elusive Reese Witherspoon and spandex man Jake Gyllenhaal, were caught in a rare moment outside Jake's Hollywood Hills home, where Reese picked up the hot piece. The highly unpublic duo wore his n' her sunglasses -- but could not escape the glare of a paparazzo who snapped them. The sexy duo then sped toward Reese's Brentwood home. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not my Jakey poo. Not again. Curses!!! A pox on you, Reese Witherspoon, and your ability to snag the hottest men in Hollywood with your feminine wiles!!!! [Source]

In less infuriating (yet more creepy) celeb couple news, here are a few pictures of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes gettin' all amorous at the dinner table as they dined with friends at a restaurant in Germany (where the couple have relocated to so that Tom could resume work on his new movie Valkyrie):

You know that old adage about the couple that togas together? Well apparently, it holds true because things appear to be going very well for lovebirds Reichen Lehmkuhl and Ryan Barry. Here are a couple pics of Ry-Chen from a recent toga party in the Hamptons and then at the Out Lounge party at Splash nightclub in New York where the boys were snapped sippin' Evian all night long:

This *must* be the longest relationship that Reichen has ever been involved in ... er, if you overlook that little marriage he had with Amazing Race parter Chip which pretty much ended as soon as they won the million bucks -- or the who-knows-how-long clandestine romance with Lance Bass ... this love-affair with Ryan seems way more grounded. [Source, Source, thanks Pablo]

Additionally, things appear to be coming along very nicely between Lance Bass and Pedro Andrade ... well, I think. Actor Alan Cumming is the latest guest photographer featured on RoidRage.com and among his other Polaroid pics from the LifeBall in Vienna, Austria earlier this year are these 2 cute pics of Landro getting to know one another on a bus:

Let's try and not notice that Lance appears to be wearing way too much make-up for his own good in these pics and just focus on the birth of their love for one another. RoidRage.com members can access all of Alan Cummings's Polaroid pics HERE. [Source]

... and while I have ZERO interest in seeing his terrrrrible-looking movie, I see no reason why we can't just enjoy these pictures anyways. I've already had my fill of horrrrible movies to last me a long time (I'll explain further at the end of today's post). [Source]

Matthew Roloff, the father of the family featured on the reality television show "Little People, Big World" was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of intoxicants on June 19. The Washington County Sheriff's Office released the information Monday. At about 11:53 p.m. on June 19, a Washington County Sheriff's deputy spotted a white 2005 Chevrolet van traveling west on Northwest Union Road near Northwest Cornelius Pass Road in an unincorporated area of Washington County, according to the sheriff's office. The van, driven by Roloff, 45, of Helvetia, Ore., was swerving. He was pulled over and failed the field sobriety test. Roloff refused a breath test and was taken to the Washington County Jail. He was cited for DUI, refusing the breath test, and failure to drive within the lane. After he was cited, Roloff was released. While this is only marginally interesting on a pop culture level (after all, who isn't getting arrested for drunk driving) I mention this because David's friends Diana and Ikon from San Diego came up for a visit a couple of months ago and got us all interested in watching this show. I don't know that I ever watched anything on TLC before so I was fascinated. We spent the night watching a marathon of the show while trying to find the Roloff kids' My Space profiles and taking the Which Roloff Kid Are You? personality test. Sigh. If nice folks like the Roloffs can succumb to the pressures of drunk driving than what hope is left for the rest of us? [Source, thanks Tierney]

Kiera Knightley is the new face of the Chanel fragrance Coco Mademoiselle and here is our first look at her ad campaign:

Dean Cain is 41, J.K. Rowling is 42 and Susan Flannery ( who plays EVIL BITCHFACE Stephanie Forrester on The Bold and the Beautiful) is 64 years old today. Click HERE to see who else is celebrating a birthday today.

I got to spend much of yesterday afternoon hanging out with Jim who has been out of town for almost 2 months. We had lunch at The Grove (where Jim picked up his very own iPhone -- woot!) and then made an unsuccessful trip to the Beverly Center. Incidentally, my new California driver's license came in the mail yesterday as well ... only a week after I passed the test. I spent much of the rest of the day reading a biography on Queen Elizabeth I (exciting, I know) and then got the crazy idea to go see Lindsay Lohan's new movie I Know Who Killed Me. The previews made it look like a good movie and I figured I'd check it out before it got pulled from the theaters. Yeah, I wish I had waited until it got pulled because as much as I hoped I would love it ... I gotta admit, it was exceedingly bad -- in a Just My Luck sort of way ... but worse:

Geeze, I don't even know where to begin. As bad as the acting was and as bad as the writing was ... I think I took issue with the fact that the premise was just awful. The movie tries to make you believe that Lindsay's character Aubrey escapes the hands of a serial killer except she insists that she is really a girl named Dakota. You're supposed to think she's crazy ... until they reveal the twist -- the girls are really stigmatic twins! No shit, that's the bull they're trying to feed people. It's kinda like Lindsay's breakout movie The Parent Trap but in a not good at all way. I must give Lindsay's character Dakota some bit of credit tho ... no matter how scary things got in the end, it was never too much for a one handed, one legged stigmatic twin girl to handle all by herself. Tho, if it wasn't for the last minute cameo by Woodsy Owl, the evil man's plot might've never had been foiled. If you find yourself blessed with not knowing what the hell I'm talking about because you haven't seen the movie, then count yourself among the lucky masses.

I will be contacting my lawyer so that I can sue for my money back. Man, I really wanted the movie to be good so that there'd be some light in Lindsay's dark life right now ... sadly, it sucks hardcore. Her father, Michael Lohan, even told In Touch Weekly that he ain't even gonna go see it -- and he's trying to get close enough to her so that he can touch her money again!

Ah well ... at least I went.

Tonight I'm meeting up with Mike and Darion for a thing which, I'm hoping, will be infinitely more fun! I'll have the deets tomorrow. And that is all ... I'm out.

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