22 November 2011

Counting Backwards....364, 363, 362, 361, 360......

From the Soldier side: When I was a very young Private in the US Army, many,many years ago, I learned how to count backwards. Yeah, I know most people can do this, but we had a good reason that many civilians may not understand.
When I graduated from the US Army Infantry School at Fort Polk, Louisiana in 1975, I was sent to Frankfurt, West Germany. We were actually put in an old German prison. It was dark, cold and strange. After sitting around for a day being told all kinds of stuff in briefings that I can’t recall a word of, we were told to go sit in a room and wait for our names to be called.

Since I always obeyed orders, I waited in the room and waited, and waited, and waited. Some of the other soldiers wondered off in search of bier. I did what I was told and waited, and waited, and waited. We did a lot of waiting in those days. When my name was called, I reported to the Army Clerk and gave him my ID card. He looked at me, my ID and orders and said: “so you’re a grunt and you have no assignment yet. Do you know where you’d like to be stationed?”

I looked at him in total disbelief and said: “you mean I have some kind of choice?”

The clerk told me to go look at the big map an on the wall. Wherever I saw an Army post with BLUE pins, that was where they needed grunts. I walked over and looked at the map. There were a lot of blue pins all over the place. I could have thrown a dart with my eyes closed and hit a camp that needed grunts. Then I looked way over to the east side and saw “BERLIN” with a blue pin.

I went back and told the clerk I wanted to be sent to Berlin. He set it up and I was on the train that night. Now, keep in mind, at this point of my life I was a Private E-2. That meant I had one stripe, but didn’t know nothin’.

When I got to Berlin, the Company Clerk for C-2-6 was at the train station. He asked if I was the new private, and I stood at parade rest and responded with “Yes Specialist.” He told me to relax. When I asked a few questions, he just looked at me and said: “40 days and a wake up.”

I had no idea what he was talking about. When I got to my barracks, I was greeted by some pretty scruffy looking soldiers…their hair was a little too long, the mustaches were a little too bushy, and they looked more like short haired hippies. When I asked one of them where my room was, he pointed then said: “15 days and a wake up.”

I was too confused to ask what the heck he was talking about. I slept for about 1 day, and was woken up the next day by another Specialist four who told me: “get your ass up and get your PT uniform on.” He was my new squad leader.

I was confused, I didn’t know we’d do PT every day for the rest of our lives. As I got into the platoon formation, I was not greeted with what would be normal conversation, but soldiers said things like: “I’m Joe, 76 days and a wake up.”

What I found out later that day is they were telling me how many days they had left in the US Army. You see it didn’t matter how long you had been in, but how much time you had left…kind of like getting out of prison.

When a soldier got down to 90 days of less, they were called a “Short Timer” and pretty much left alone. They would show up for formations and stuff, but they usually were not given any jobs to do unless they wanted to do them.

Fast forward to 2004, Baghdad, Iraq. The day we got to Iraq, I had made a backwards calendar. At first most of the regular Army and National Guard troops I was with didn’t understand it. But it was a way of helping the time go by. It started with 364 days…and counted backwards. When we all were down to 90 days, I announced in company formation that we were all Short Timers.

1. There was a whole litany of short timer language. The only one I remember is: "two digit midget."2. Was never anal or interested enough to follow a countdown religiously.3. If you wrote anything but name or blood type on the camouflage cover of your helmet, you would have been made to clean it off in my unit. Common site for short-timer calendars.4. We had our weaknesses, but my outfit looked like soldiers when we went outside the wire.5. Showed up at the reception center in Frankfurt without records.6. That was due to an admin screw-up in my old unit.7. Talk about a red-headed step child.8. Discovered that only screw-ups and people facing charges traveled without their personnel files and finance records.4. Went from Spec 4 to private (E-2)in a heart beat.5. Was ordered to remove my ribbons and awards.6. They would have made me take off my Corks, unblouse my Class A trou and put on low quarters -but that would have been too much trouble.7. My gracious reaction to all this probably sealed my fate.8. Wanted to go to an Airborne unit. A righteously indignant PFC chose to send me to a leg unit in Southern Germany.9. After about 3 months of E-2 part pays, my records showed up and I was grudgingly allowed to put up my earned rank and whatnot.10. It took many years for me to realize that, while the Army was screwed up in many ways, most of the difficulties I experienced were created or exacerbated by my big mouth and combative attitude.11. In the half of my life spent in leadership positions, have seen my self in thousands of young men.12. The services and society in general are less tolerant of that sort of stupidity than they were in my salad days. And that's the biz.V/R JWest

Enjoyed that one RD. I usually tell people who ask that I did 30 years and 7 seconds police service. When I get the quizzicals re the seven seconds, I explain that it was the time it took me to turn the alarm clock off on the day I could leave and draw my full pension ;)

Damn it...the first Thanksgiving I wasn't either on a deployment or working as a cop I've had off in 30 years..and I get a cold.

I knew some of my readers whould understand. The device I made was a cloth measuring tape that was easy to tear..so as I counted down the days in Berlin, I would tear off a number. I carried it on a blue infantry cord in my pocket....

The platoon sgt, who was a lifer didn't like it and kept saying I was going to re-enlist. I got out just to prove him wrong....

This many people came here by mistake

Great Quotes in History---

"Some of us were put here to help others....I'm not sure what some of those Others were put here for."

“The US Army usually gets things right….but only after screwing things up a few times to get there.”

"Don't do anything half-ass...if you're going to be a screw up, do it right and do it all ass!"-Some First Sergeant in Iraq“His career choice is to be a martyr. Let’shelp him meet those objectives before he can do any harm to our guys.”

"US ARMY: Breaking things and hurting people since 1775"Before a war military science seems a real science, like astronomy; but after a war it seems more like astrology"Men. We're going into Fallujah today...so I want you to eat a full breakfast-everything, eggs, bacon, coffee, oatmeal, toast, milk, eat as much as you can. Because...you can't shit your pants in fear on an empty stomach."- CI Roller Dude in Dec 04.

OIF 3: "The cost of Freedom is HIGH! (About $1million per trooper per year)

SFOR 14-, the second to last season... "Stupidity got us into this mess....why can't it get us out?" Grenades: when throwing up stairs or up hill, gravity is your enemy.

Remember: "The Cops are only 6 minutes away---when you need them in 30 seconds."

“Never before in the history of mankind, have so few done so much for so many who didn’t give a shit”-CI Roller Baghdad, Iraq 2005.

Remember...half the people you know are below average!

Life is tough...it's tougher if you're stupid!

Never before in the history of mankind have so few done so much with no leadership, whilst so many did so little and still got paid~ SFOR 14, Bosnia 2003-04