If Classic College Experiences Were Ben & Jerry’s Flavors

It's like they named these flavors after college struggles.

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Created in the late 70s, Ben and Jerry’s ice cream has some of the best tasting and most interesting flavors around – and to complement the creative flavor combos are equally creative and funny names. In fact, the names are so specific and strange that we’ve compiled a list of flavor names that actually reflect typical college experiences and feelings.

Why are you here? What even happened last night? Why are you walking home in painful foot-hating heels, tight skinny jeans and that suddenly too sheer black top, while also trying to hide your messy hair, smeared make-up and greasy face?

A walk of shame may leave you just as hazed and confused as this mix of hazelnut and chocolate ice creams with fudge chips and a hazelnut fudge swirl – even though both of these might just be the sign of a night well spent.

Chocolate cookie meets ice cream. You meet the random guy you’re set up with for your next date party. You are the perfect combo of mocha and chocolate ice creams: smooth, rich and with enough energy to bring the party. He is a classic chocolate overload: chocolate cookies, fudge flakes and a chocolate cookie core. The two of you together are not necessarily a classic combination, but it might turn out to be just the change you were looking for.

Wow. There are literally a million student groups here, from the school newspaper to the professional fraternity Delta Sigma Pi to the yoga club. This flavor also has everything: chocolate and vanilla ice creams, fudge-covered toffee pieces, peanut butter cups, white chocolatey chunks and even fudge-covered almonds.

You want to join a student group or two to get involved and boost that résumé. But now that you’re here at the fair, everything’s overwhelming. Ben and Jerry’s Everything But The… has so much stuff, you don’t even know how to handle yourself: a few toppings at a time or all at once?

It starts with chocolate and sweet cream ice creams: the basic black tee and jeans for arete day. The caramel clusters are what makes you stand out: something sweet and memorable, maybe you pick a conversation topic that the sorority girl you’re talking to has to “chew” on a bit. Next comes the fudge-covered almonds. That crunchy chocolate deliciousness is as satisfying as being asked back to your top choices. Finish off this flavor with a marshmallow swirl of sweetness: the bid day that makes everything worthwhile.

Because half of the themed parties here are red, white and blue or America themed. Seriously, it’s time to get more creative. But if you’re going to stick to that patriotic theme, at least serve up some of this Ben and Jerry’s flavor.

Containing “1776% of your recommended daily allowance of freedom”, Americone Dream is a mouthwatering mix of vanilla ice cream, fudge-covered waffle cone pieces and a caramel swirl. Even better news: Stephen Colbert donates a portion of the proceeds from this flavor to charities that provide food and medical assistance for veterans and their families.

You’re looking for a new experience and can’t wait to get out of the U.S. to explore. Like you, this sorbet pushes the boundaries by daring to be different from the ice creams we know and love at Ben and Jerry’s.

And just like you take that study abroad trip to Cape Town one step further by deciding to go bungee jumping, this sorbet surprises us all by brazenly combining blueberry and raspberry into an extraordinarily refreshing treat.

You heard college would be harder than high school. But it wasn’t until your first painful all-nighter that you were truly initiated into college student-dom. You struggled to keep your eyes open, chugged at least 6 cups of coffee and gorged yourself on anything and everything in order to keep your energy going.

The creamy coffee ice cream in this flavor will help you power through those first few hours and the espresso fudge chips will carry you into the next day.

It’s 4am and you finally make it back to your dorm room. You plop down in your bed and kick off the shoes that have been digging into your poor feet for the last few hours. Your fuzzy mind shuts off and you breathe a sigh of relief.

When you’re missing the comfort of home, reminisce with this flavor that taste’s just like mom’s freshly baked cookies served up with a glass of milk. According to Ben and Jerry’s, this is the “most euphoric assortment of cookies we ever dunked, chunked and swirled in our ice cream.” A combination of vanilla ice cream with a chocolate cookie swirl, chocolate chip and chocolate chocolate chip cookies makes this no basic cookies n’ cream.

Two Ben and Jerry’s employees tricked another employee into believing this flavor actually existed (it didn’t). Feeling bad, they decided to actually make it after all. Vanilla malt ice cream decked out in fudge-covered pretzels along with fudge and peanut butter swirls, the Chubby Hubby is guaranteed to taste so fine you won’t even mind the calories.

You thought you’d stay with your high school boyfriend forever, but the reality of college and long distance hit you hard and you had to break it off. But not to worry, Ben and Jerry’s Banana Split ice cream is here for you.

Wipe away those tears with a big dose of Netflix and this flavor, complete with banana and strawberry ice creams swirled together with walnuts, fudge chunks and a fudge swirl.

You didn’t think last night was a mistake, but now every time you walk past him, he’s giving you the stink eye or avoiding you all together. This sweet cream ice cream packed with blonde brownies and a salted caramel core will get you through the aftermath of the saltiest of hookups.

Put away those books and go the f*ck out. Your new silky top is waiting. When you get back, wolf down some of this mix of caramel and chocolate ice creams with chocolate cookie swirls and gobs of chocolate chip and peanut butter cookie dough. It’s hard to think of a more extravagant combination.

This flavor was the winner in our Wash U Spoon Ben and Jerry’s taste test. And hey, maybe one day when you’re rich and famous, you’ll pull a Jimmy Fallon and get a Ben and Jerry’s flavor named after you, too.

Jam out to this blend of chocolate and raspberry ice creams sprinkled with fudge chips and finished off perfectly with a sweet raspberry core. It’s unique and multidimensional just like any ideal concert experience.