Toys that Make You Say "What?"

A top 10 list of childrens toys that either make no sense, are annoying, or are stupid.

Or as I used to call it, the flintstones car. You most likely had one of these things as a kid, it's a plastic car missing a bottom that rolls as you run....thus defeating the purpose of riding in it. And, seriously, it's called a powerwheels! Sheesh!

9 - Etch-a-Sketch

Yes, I know, the Etch-a-sketch is a legendary toy and everyone had one, and you probably spent many hours drawing with it...or should I say, TRYING to draw with it. I mean, c'mon! You have 2 coordinate 2 knobs to make an image, and you can't cross over your other lines unless you want your picture to look like crap! I had more fun with a pencil and a piece of paper.

8 - Cracker Jack Prizes

Most of the time, you begged your parents for stuff like cereals and Kid's Cuisines because of the prizes inside. This was not the case of Cracker Jack. The only reason you wanted Cracker Jack was the sweet caramel popcorn(cause no one eats the peanuts). the prizes are ussually crap like a folding puzzle or *gasp* a cardboard truck!

7 - Slot Car Tracks

Who came up with this idea? Two cars racing on a track with grooves in it. doesn't sound that bad...throw in the fact that you can't knock your opponent of the track, or, for that case, control the speed of your car(unless there's some fancy new one that's come out since i was a kid). It MIGHT be fun if the cars had, saw, rocket launchers or something....oh, wait! The cars are in grooves! they wouldn't hit anything anyway!

6 - Plastic Farm Sets

Nothin's more fun that watching a plastic low detail cow eat grass(carpet)! Also, the fences never freakin' stay where you want them too. Seriously, the only advantage to this over watching real cows is there is less stinkage. Maybe it's because I live out in the country, but, I can walk not even a mile and look at cows, so why would I want to do in my living room? I guess when you're 5, everything is fun.

5 - The Burger King Pokemon toys

Remember when Pokemon the first movie came out, and the entire world skipped a heartbeat? Also, burger king released a line of toys given out in kids meals. Most of them just did somehting like light up, or, in the case of the plush ones....*drumroll*...SIT THERE! There where the cool spining top ones, though, like Voltorb. Also, 3 year old kids suffocated on the Pokeballs. EPIC FAIL!

4 - Furby

OH. MY. GOD! Furby - an annoying animated bird rodent from hell, forged by Satan himself. Yeah, I'd say that description fits the bill. These things were just freakin annoying! Sure, they had some amazing technology in them for a toy at that time, but the things were just creepy! and annoying...very, very annoying. Did i mention they're annoying yet? and let's not forget demonic! This is a true story! My friends furb tunred itself on in the middle of the night, so, annoyed, he got out of bed and took the batteries out. IT KEPT TALKING!...at this point, he beat on the floor until it stopped talking. Evil little....whatever they ares >.>

3 - Gooey Louie(not entirely sure this is what is was called)

A game where you must pick boogers from a big plastic head in order to win...BRILLIANT! As if you didn't dig your own nose enough as a kid!....you have stomped right?...RIGHT?...either way, this game is disgusting! Also, you lost by pulling the wrong snot string, causing his brain to eject! Hey, kids! Don't pick your nose! If you pull the wrong booger, you just muight lose your brain! What a message!

2 - Go Bots

To put it simply, Transformers ripoff, only not nearly as cool. If you ever asked your parents for a Transformer, and they got you a go Bot instead, you probably felt like smacking them. They don't even look cool! They look as lame as the name makes them sound! Like Transformers, there was a cartoon series, which also sucked just as bad as the toy line! Optimus Prime approves this message!

1 - Sit n' Spin

Ok, seriously, who designed this toy? You sit on it, and turn a wheel in the middle. The faster you turn it, the faster you spin! It's like a vomit machine! Also, who needs a toy to spin in a circle?....or to sit?....or, for that matter, to sit, and spin in a circle?! Whoever designed this obviously was trying to get revenge on someone by making them clean up their kids puke.

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I like how you guys pan this article for having large lumps of uninterrupted text but praise the retarded kid who wrote a "brave" article about only having a stuffed Mickey Mouse as a friends. You don't need pictures if you aren't lazy. I enjoyed this article, it was to the point. Great job!

Not bad. Could've used pics though. I had that car as a wee tot, and the Burger King Pokemon toys were my life! They didn't do much, but I used my imagination ^_^ Only problem, I never got the Pokemon I wanted.

Not a bad article at all, actually pretty good. Enjoyed reading it! Too bad, if you had just added some pics this wouldn't have ended up on the back pages. I enjoy seeing pics in articles too, but it does make me sick that the same old tired ass video game articles score better than articles like these...ones that actually describe some fun retro stuff! And why? because of damn pictures. I look forward to future articles! Thx for posting!