Tag Archives: women

In order to stay in touch with our fast moving modern world, one thing that I do is to periodically scan multiple television channels concentrating, though not entirely, on the news including conservative and liberal opinion ones. I’m not sure how many channels I have, but they are in the multiple hundreds. Don’t ask me why but last night, for the first time, I scanned the upper channel range and discovered they all deal with old movies. I was about to turn the TV off but decided to click to one more channel and was I surprised! It was a video on the famous Cathouse, a legal house of prostitution in Nevada. One scene was a revelation to me and piqued my curiosity.

One of the ladies said that she and her lady colleagues had to stay sexually stimulated in order to be motivated to service the men. This was news to me. I do have some doubts whether this true in most houses of prostitution, but who knows. Anyway, in order to keep their passions on fire, they heavily depend on dildos and vibrators. Her collection of what seemed like a dozen such erotic devices was displayed. It comprised mostly artificial penises and some vibrators. In addition, she and her colleagues have belts connected to an artificial penis or dildo which they use to copulate with the other ladies of the night and, I would guess, to sodomize them and their men clients. Some men and women enjoy performing oral sex on these dildos. I understand that some preferred the flavored type.

For whatever reason, I became curious about artificial vaginas. I was too curious to watch the finale of the show and went directly to my computer and searched for “artificial vaginas”- and there they were. But I was truly surprised for they were only on a relatively few websites. I thought there would be many more, including life-size lady mannequins.

Speaking of mannequins, here’s an interesting fact: During World War II, Hitler decided to send soft, inflatable female mannequins with vaginas to his troops on the front battlefield lines in order to give them the comfort of a woman’s company and, of course, to enjoy their orgasms. Much to the credit of the German soldiers, they were embarrassed and refused the offer. Also, “Facing the enemy, they would want to fight rather than fuck.”

I called G, and he professed ignorance of the details of the artificial vagina scene. We blamed ourselves for being out of touch with the modern world of sex. So, for educational purposes, we decided to call our male friends and other male contacts and ask them what they knew about artificial vaginas. We spoke to about 20 of them of ages ranging from about 25 to 75. All vaguely knew about their existence, but they not only never used one, but knew of no one who had.

G and I wondered why this humongous potential market had not arrived. Then it suddenly dawned on us. It’s technology. The artificial vaginas, unlike dildos and vibrators, are not functional or consumer friendly enough to make for easy use. Dildos are flexible, very easy to use and do a number of things. They can wiggle like a snake and, at the same time, vibrate both on the clitoris and in the vagina. And, as long as the battery is charged or the wire plugged in, they can perform forever which, according to G, some women love. But G said that there are women who aren’t turned on by vibration dildos. Also, they are also very easy to clean which may be a big problem with an artificial vagina. But, in my opinion, one major advantage is that they are portable! You can put and hide them in a woman’s pocketbook- FYI, men don’t carry pocketbooks- which she can use whenever the occasion calls for it even in a restaurant’s ladies room. G and I have noticed that, unlike men, women are notoriously not comfortable sitting on a public toilet seat and only do number 1 by squatting above it. Doing number 2 is unthinkable because one must be seated to do so or cause a mess. But, if she’s turned- on by her date, she does have the option to be seated and turn on the battery. (By the way, G and I also have noticed that women don’t drink much, if any, water during dinner).

I did a dildo-vibrator search on the Internet and, unlike the handful of artificial vagina websites, the dildo ones seemed infinite! This clearly tells us that the female products are much, much more consumer friendly than artificial vaginas.

Conclusion: Since there is an overwhelming, bullish male orgasm- seeking market, it makes compelling sense that the virtual absence of the artificial vagina market is primarily due to the failure of technology to produce a consumer or male friendly device from portable pocket pussies to big or small breasted but always with tight vaginas, voluptuous, inflatable mannequins.

But my mindset as a physician-scientist makes me wonder if there are also other reasons why men may not be as enthusiastic about making love to an artificial vagina as one would expect. Even assuming that the vagina products are inferior, we all know that males are a horny bunch and would at least purchase substantially more devices than they do, friendly or not. Perhaps it’s in the male psychology that turns them off. I don’t know and both G and I don’t think so, but it’s a point to consider.

There is, however, one fact that’s not debatable which makes the design of an artificial vagina much more complicated than female toys. It involves two steps. First, unlike females, it’s getting a hard-on or, to our international friends, an erection, which is necessary to insert into a vagina- artificial or not! Perhaps the seductive voice of a woman should be part of the device containing a selection of themes for his choosing from teasing to domination or whatever turns on his BGL or Brain Genital Law. Or it can be programmed in his cellphone. Sure, there’s Viagra, but it’s not nearly as stimulating as a woman’s voice and the combination of the two. Second, the vagina then must do its thing such as fit comfortably, be at the right temperature, produce smooth, and rhythmic contractions at different speeds, among others in order to bring the male to climax. It can be portable or large and non-portable. A flexible product line is necessary to meet the demand.

Let me deviate for a moment and explain to you why a properly designed device would be a wonderful gift to my old and dear friend, G. I told this story before but am not sure whether in a previous post or in the book. Over dinner one night I told him of my penis experience as a young doctor. A man came into the emergency room in excruciating pain of his penis. He had a fractured penis of which the most common cause is when a woman sits on the top of a stiff erection and vigorously pumping away which is what happened to him. His urethra was broken and the poor guy couldn’t pee. The only cure for this condition is to ram a catheter into the penis and create a new urethra, an extremely painful experience that any man would not welcome. G had many encounters with women on the top, but after I told him the fractured penis story he was always fearful of the possibility of experiencing the same thing and could never relax and enjoy it. Now with a properly designed artificial vagina he could lie, without fear, on his back, without exerting himself and let himself go!

Getting back to faux vaginas: A friend told me that in Japan there’s an impressive market for “male masturbators.” He says they prefer not to use the term artificial vagina. Evidently, using one of these devices, a man won the world prize by masturbating for almost 10 hours without cardiac resuscitation!

Shakespeare wrote, “What’s in a name. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” So also with a male masturbator: It’s an outright artificial vagina.

During my career I’ve witnessed many new markets blossom into huge money makers. The artificial vagina market is such a potential market. Enrico Fermi, the brilliant Italian physicist and father of the atomic bomb, once asked a question about the existence of extraterrestrial life what is now called the Fermi Paradox. If there are billions of planets in the Universe for billions of years many of which have life forms, he asked, “ If so, where are they?”

I ask, “Regarding the artificial vagina entrepreneurs for Lorenzo Baccalà’s Three P’s Paradox: The Portable Pocket Pussy: Where are they?”

Not too long ago, G descended from his mountain cabin to spend some time in Manhattan. One night, we went to the Metropolitan Opera to see Puccini’s La Boheme. This time the Met did it right. It was a beautiful performance not because of the sets but of the singers. Their voices magically carried the conflicted messages of love and death.

We rarely eat and drink before a nighttime performance because they dull the senses. After the performance we went to G’s favorite hotel, The Michelangelo, to have a bite to eat. This Italian family owned hotel stands above the others because of its elegance and class. While we were reminiscing about opera, I became curious about G’s experience with women and music and whether it played an important part in his encounters.

He smiled very broadly and answered,

“You bet. It’s one of the keys to open the doors.”

Our dinner or supper, as G likes to call it, ended, and he wanted to have his cognac and smoke his pipe, which is his nightly ritual. In Manhattan, the latter could only happen in his suite. The cognac arrived, he lighted his pipe and surprised the hell out of me. He delivered a mini- discourse on the history of music of which I’ll just briefly point out a few of his points. He concentrated on the Roman concept of music and how it impacts not only the individual but an entire culture. It was taught in schools on an equal level as mathematics and science. It was considered a significant moral force which encourages civilized behavior. But the Romans also strongly believed that there is “bad” music which leads to destructive behavior and weakens people and countries. G believes that’s happening in our country, and he’s really worried about this.

After his impassioned delivery, he took a small gulp of his cognac, puffed on his pipe and asked,

“Does that answer your question?” “No, G. You got off the beaten track. I asked about your experiences with music and women and not a lecture on its history.” He burst out into laughter, as he usually does when caught off-guard, which reflects his rich sense of humor. I then asked, “Is there such a thing as good or bad music with your lady friends?”

“Lorenzo, you’ve got to remember that in my heyday day there were no CD’s or cell phones but only radios. I never, and I mean never, turned on the TV. That’s how you lose the rhythm of being with a woman. Though I don’t recall discussing music in our book, I almost always turned on the radio after we entered my suite and searched for soft music with voices that could deliver a mellow mood like Frank Sinatra and Roberta Flack. No Elvis Presley or Jersey boys were allowed!”

“G, here’s a tough question to answer for there may be no words to explain it. What does music do to a woman?”

“Good question and, by the way, it also has an impact on men, though I’m only an expert on me. I have thought about what would be a single word to describe it. It’s receptivity. We talked about receptivity before in detail in the book. It’s when the woman is relaxed and sends you a message that she has crossed the Rubicon and open to further pursuit. Music helps make that happen.”

“How do you know when she’s receptive?”

“It’s all in her body language and what she says or even does not say. Some men can sense it and others can’t.

“Now here’s something that will surprise you. Certain women are turned on by classical and somber types of music. Let me tell you of two encounters that happened not too long ago: I was in my cabin with a lady in her late 40’s. After we ate my homemade pasta and had a few very robust drinks, I decided to play a CD of Beethoven’s 6th Symphony, one of my favorites. It really turned her on, and she asked me to replay it. And would you believe, I did for almost the rest of the night! Recently, here at the Michelangelo, I was with a highly intelligent, uptight woman. I had just bought a CD of the great tenor, Jose Carreras, singing serious, mellow Catalan folk songs. She told me she loved it. She began to become receptive so I played it again- and again!

“Much music today is hyperactive- you know what I mean. Maybe times have changed, particularly in our drug culture, but to spend serious time with a woman listening to hyperactive music for me is counterproductive. It’s got to be calm. William Congreve is famous for his quote but it’s a misquote. The misquote is, “Music hath the power to soothe the savage beast” but what he actually wrote was, “Music hath the power to soothe the savage breast.”’

“G, what’s a savage breast?”

“That’s a complicated question. Let’s talk about it another time.”

We were about ready to call it a night when he once more burst out into laughter. “Lorenzo, I forgot about Ravel’s Bolero. Over 40 years ago, I met a young lady at an opera rehearsal at the grand Ansonia hotel here in Manhattan. One thing lead to another, and I ended up in her small studio apartment. She really liked her marijuana; that I vividly remember. Anyway, she played, at high volume, Ravel’s Bolero over and over again and boy, did it turn her on. To tell the truth I was also infected with the rhythm, and we had an exceptionally energetic session. I almost had a heart attack, even at my then young age. To the readers who don’t know the piece please go to YouTube, listen and give it a try.

“Lorenzo, last point and an extremely important tip: After love-making is over and you’re sitting down with a woman to enjoy some tranquil last minutes together, turn off the goddamn radio right away! I can’t explain why, but it very counterproductive to the mood and even a downer which takes away from the total hit of the evening.”

Let me begin by repeating my mantra: The conclusions of clinical studies on sex are often highly questionable and faulty. And so is the one discussed in this post. On the other hand, it does, in part, confirm what’s been going on between men and women thousands of years before the Neanderthals.

A study conducted by psychologist, Sarah Gervais, at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, which was published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, reported that, on initial encounters, both men and women view women more by their curvaceous body parts than by their faces. The more curvaceous she is the more attention is paid to her breasts and rump and much less to her face. The author finds this disturbing because it makes women victims of objectification. Objectification, as I read it, is an insulting and degrading act of prejudice which diminishes the value of a woman. She seems upset that even ordinary women- whatever that means- are being reduced to their sexual parts even by the women who ogle them.

The wisdom of the ages, and practically all data which exists, confirms that men are sexually turned- on by sensually sculptured female curves from the breasts to rear- ends. Some even are turned-on by the curvatures of a woman’s nose, ears and feet, but they were not evaluated in the study.

I spoke to G about this study and then asked him a general question about what attracts him when he first meets a woman, and what feminine attributes light up his desire to be with her as a total woman and not for bedtime pleasure only. He, surprisingly, began to sing the first part of the famous song of yesteryear, Come on baby light my fire. Then he, ignoring my question and obviously energized about the curve study, asked, “What are women’s curves for? A sign that they’re great cooks which would turn men on who are searching for the great pasta dish that they never had? Just ask a woman, and you’ll know the answer. She’s happy and pleased that, even with mediocre curves, they are enough to attract a man. With many of the women who I was privileged to be with, we did talk about what attracts a man. I never met a woman who felt this negative objectification thing. And why should they? It’s one critical component of femininity in general and gives them an upper hand in the battle of the sexes.

“By the way, since Sarah Gervais took the time to set up the study, which is no easy chore, she should be given lots of credit. It would have been an interesting addition to the study if she would have evaluated how these men and women initially viewed men who are relatively curveless.

“Look, when I meet a woman, the curves of her breasts and rear- ends certainly enter the picture. But, remember, in my case they are only part of the total impact and never the only factor which attracted me. In fact, in most of the women who I was lucky to be with, didn’t have fantastic curves. To repeat: It was the total hit of her presence which is tough to describe. It’s her inviting body language particularly the face and the eyes, the mirror of what’s going on in her mind.

“I can’t tell you how many times have I’ve been at social gatherings having a conversation with women when another woman joins us or enters the room. What do they see about her? Her complete attire –including, would you believe, her shoes! Her jewels. Her hairdo. Her makeup. The way she carries herself and, yes, her face and curves. Lorenzo, I’m sure you have had the same experience and guess what? The entire evaluation of the newly entered woman takes less than five seconds- maybe less! The brain has about a billion neurons and many more other types of cells which, despite what you read, hold and process infinitely more information than a computer. Some of the old timers remember how Gary Kasparov, perhaps the world’s greatest chess player of all time, played a championship game against Deep Blue, IBM’s giant formidable computer. Deep Blue was observing about 200 million positions every second and, in a world-shocker, beat Kasparov in their first match. They then played additional games and Kasparov won the last two which indicates that the brain can hold and process more information than Big Blue which also tells us that when a man and a woman first behold another man and woman, billions of connective neurons are initially firing away: And I can tell you, it’s not only on a woman’s curves!”

Based on my many previous conversations with G, I sensed he was running out of gas. But I was curious about one observation he made in the Casanova book and asked, “G, speaking of curves, you once commented that, like faces, all the derrieres of the women who you were with none was the same. What about their vulvas?”

There was a palpable pause. Then G laughed and said, ”Lorenzo, it’s martini time. Ciao!”

High volume sex in the United States is a first time historic phenomenon. I, very much concerned, extensively cover and wonder about all types of sex patterns and where they are leading us. Not too long ago, I had an intriguing conversation with a mother and her daughter who were open about their sexual experiences with multiple men describing a few scenes in impressive graphic detail. Please don’t ask me how this happened! I was somewhat uncomfortable for it was a first for me, and I decided to just listen and ask a few pointed questions. Curious as hell, I asked the daughter, “Does it bother you to hear your mom talk about her sexcapades with different men particularly the one in which she was sodomized and talked about how she loved it?” She replied, “Doc, you’re in the dark ages. This is normal these days, and mothers and daughters should discuss their experiences. Why not?” The mother agreed. I then asked about whether this also happened with the father-husband. He left town when the daughter was a teenager and was not involved.

A couple of days after, when I was having my martini, I wondered where we’re heading with men and women having large numbers of different sexual partners. Is there a difference if a man beds with fifty women than vice versa? Is it more harmful to men or women? Now I’m going to piss-off some women- and even some men at our universities- with my answer. I concluded it is much more harmful to women!

“Where’s the evidence?” you ask. “According to your posts you’re a big guy on producing evidence by clinical studies. Where are they?” My immediate reaction is that my judgment is based on observation and experiencing human behavior over four generations. As women age their interest is pursuing sex partners significantly diminishes while that of men decreases far less. Menopause tells us that. Now I don’t need a clinical study but only my observation and experience to make that judgment. For example, if an unaccompanied blindfolded man crosses Broadway in Manhattan, he has a greater chance of being hit by a car and killed than a person with normal vision.

Because of its complexity, I decided to write three posts in order to develop a convincing argument to warn women about the negative side of having multiple sex partners. I define the negative side as experiencing stress, instability and unhappiness. I began to write a draft covering many aspects of women’s and men’s sexual revolution ranging from psychology to the menopause. Half-way through my writing, I decided what I had to say was not sufficiently enlightening, let alone convincing, to me. It was also too boiler- plate for women. There was something missing, and it bothered me. I couldn’t figure it out and decided not to continue with the post and move on to another subject.

That night, however, I went to my local bar-restaurant where I sometimes do my writing. It’s a delightful place where both the rich and not- so- rich mingle and dine on tasty, inexpensive Italian food. The waitresses there work hard to make money on the side to support their families. They’re good, upper gals, and I truly enjoy the banter with them.

Then it happened! I decided to ask the waitresses who they thought would experience more harm. It was a busy night, and they were moving to and fro like the wind. As my favorite waitress, Robyn, flew by my table she, almost shouting, said, “It’s women. It’s expectations. Women have greater expectations!”

This hit me like a lightning bolt, and I had an Archimedes’s Eureka moment. Robyn hit it on the nose regarding what was bothering me. In my long life’s sojourn there is little doubt in my mind that this characteristic is biologically integrated in the female mentality much more than in the male’s. As I frequently do, I called others for their opinion, mostly women, including Heidi, a lady of class and intelligent feminist who lives in Zurich, Switzerland. All, including Heidi, and without hesitation, wholeheartedly agreed.

Calcium supplementation causes constipation. It is one of the best kept secrets from women who are, by far, the major consumers taking this supplement en masse for many years in an attempt to reduce the degree of postmenopausal osteoporosis. About two decades ago, I proposed that calcium consumption was a major cause of divorce, and divorce would, in part, increase over time simply because women were increasingly consuming it.

Why this belief? Women are naturally more constipated than men for unknown natural reasons. Constipation leads to mood swings including psychological changes ranging from depression, fatigue, lethargy, irritability to decreased patience, among others.

In the early 80’s the NIH published the consensus of a group of medical experts who, based on existing scientific and clinical studies, recommended calcium supplementation for the prevention of postmenopausal osteoporosis. Shortly after, the consumption of calcium by women increased dramatically which continues today. I believe that such consumption has significantly increased women’s already natural state of constipation significantly increasing the negative psychological impact. (About 10% of men take calcium supplementation).

Parallel to the substantial increase in calcium consumption and psychological stress has been a dramatic increase in our divorce rate. Though there is no statistical evidence to support a direct link between the two, from a medical point of view, it is not unreasonable to assume that chronic negative mood changes among men and women due to constipation, from any cause, can lead to unsettling marriage relationships and contribute as an added factor among the various modern stressful factors causing divorce.

You may justifiably wonder why this possible linkage of such immense importance to women, men, family and country, even apart from the divorce one, has escaped unnoticed. As with many things in life, there is no obvious answer. One possible reason is that Americans are very reluctant to discuss their bowels movements with others. They have no problem openly discussing other maladies such as arthritis, heart disease and cancer but revealing the frequency and nature of their bowel movements is just not done! Bowel movement patterns remain a very private affair even in our open American society!

I was not successful coming upon reliable data regarding the consumption of calcium by young women. They should be aware of calcium constipator effect.

I would rate the potential calcium-constipation unhappiness phenomenon as an urgent issue of national concern and, because of its dramatic upheaval impact, equivalent to that of our economy that should be seriously examined.

(Though I do not prescribe over the Internet there’s something I think women should know about and discuss with their physicians: Magnesium is an essential structural component of bone, and there are studies which indicate that it may have a beneficial effect on bone and possibly add to calcium’s beneficial effect. In addition, it has an opposite effect on bowel movements than calcium causing loose stools and diarrhea and may decrease the calcium-induced constipation. It may, therefore, make sense to take both of them instead of calcium alone.)

I had lunch with two charming, likable women in their upper twenties and interviewed them about what women in their age group are thinking about sex and long term relationships with men. I chose that age for they have emerged from the earlier more free days, have jobs and are more mature than college students. Though I very much enjoyed their company I was surprised by what I heard and, frankly, curious about their futures. Though I didn’t learn this until the latter part of our conversation, they were both vegetarians. Rather than a long description of what we talked about, it’s best that I put it in a question and answer format. They were both in complete agreement with their thoughts and answers.

Me: “What type of men are you attracted to?”

Them: “Effeminate.”

Me: “Homosexual?”

Them: “On the border, but we really don’t like macho men.”

Me: “How about strong men?”

Them: “Maybe. Not sure”

Me: “Do you have boyfriends and how are they?”

Them: “Yes. Both are effeminate, sensitive and maybe one is also homosexual.”

Me: “Do you plan to marry?”

Them: “Ugh! No way. Marriage is the wrong way to go, and we are not interested-at all! We were told as kids that marriage between a man and a woman was natural, and we should find a good husband.”

Me: “Do you know any happily-enough married couples?”

Them: “Yes.”

Me: “How about when your 50 0r 60, don’t you want the security of a marriage?”

Them: “No way! We don’t need it and don’t want it.”

Me: “Do you want to have kids?”

Them: “Not my own by natural birth but maybe adopt one or be a surrogate for another woman. My brother is a homosexual, and if he wanted me to bear his kid, I’ll do it for him.”

Me: “So you’ll have kids a number of ways except through marriage or a long term relationship with a heterosexual man?”

Them: “Yes.”

Me: “Are women more attractive to you than non-effeminate heterosexual men?”

Them: “Yes.”

Me: “Do you want to become a lesbian? “

Them: “No. And we are not bisexual.”

Me: “What’s your position on non-effeminate heterosexual men??

Them: “We’re man eaters!”

What was impressive about the mindset of these young ladies was that they were both fatalistic and very resolute about their current positions and particularly so regarding their futures. But what struck a chord in my brain is that they are both vegetarians and perhaps there is a connection between their mental and physical dietary positions. I then called a vegetarian lady friend and interviewed her. But there was one big difference: She was in her late 40’s. She doesn’t want to have children; she prefers strong men over effeminate ones and women; not against marriage but probably won’t search for it. Her answer about her life and security of her future resonated with the other two ladies. “I’m not sure, not that concerned and whatever happens will happen.”

I was intrigued by the “fatalism of the future” commonality mentality of the ladies, though only three in number. I decided to interview one more and made a contact with a vegetarian woman in her early-30’s in San Francisco. Her responses were, more or less, similar to the ladies in the 20’s. But I was particularly searching for any “fatalistic” attitude about her future and asked what happens when she becomes a senior citizen without a man to support her. Her answer? “No problem. The government will probably take care of me.” I asked, “Suppose it doesn’t?” “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. But no husband!”

In conclusion, though this is not at all a definitive survey, I’ve might have stumbled upon an unexpected, common finding because of the intensity of their responses. Vegetarian women may commonly be fatalistic about their futures, and somehow this may be connected to their dietary choices. I will try to expand my interview of vegetarian women and also interview vegetarian men as well as vegan men and women and compare the responses.

One interesting aside observation: I’m a poetry fan and was surprised to discover that two of the women were big poetry lovers. I asked them, “Do you prefer T.S. Elliot or Wordsworth?” Both loved Elliot’s and actually despised Wordsworth’s poetry. Elliot’s poetry is complex, difficult to understand and without joy. Wordsworth’s poetry is simple, clearly written celebrating the beauty of nature. Maybe I stumbled upon another finding, whatever that is.