Survey Says….

I borrowed this survey from Bangs McGee, who finally got engaged this week! Congratulations, and thanks for being too blissfully engaged to care that I’m stealing straight off your Myspace page.

You’re trapped in a room for 3 days with your worst enemy. What do you do?
Something like this.

You’re stuck on an elevator with the person you’ve fallen the hardest for. What do you do?
Cut somebody’s face off and wear it, so we can re-create the elevator scene in Silence of the Lambs.

The celebrity you love the most offers to marry you, as long as you don’t talk to any of your current friends or family members. Do you marry them?
Sadly, yes. But I’m being realistic: I’m not going to NEED any of you people when Johnny Depp is my husband.

You weigh 700 pounds, do you get liposuction or lose the weight manually?
If I weighed 700 pounds, I would jump off a bridge. Or maybe roll off a bridge.

Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
Move in and duke it out, like all good couples.

Your boyfriend/girlfriend finds out they have AIDS, do you get yourself tested?
Only after I send out letterpress announcements.

You wake up and you’re the only person left alive, what do you do?
Find something to procreate with, if I know me.

Do you want a life style like Britney Spears?
Financially and pharmaceutically, but nothing else. I stand on principles.

You have to dye your hair a different color for the rest of your life, what color do you choose?
Brown. Yawn.

Someone asks you on a date, where do you wanna go?
Browse a record store, get a hot dog, peruse the Goodwill, play skeeball, get lost in a bookstore, ride on the Ferris Wheel, visit the flamingos at the zoo, march in a parade, bake cupcakes, catch a silent film, throw the first pitch out at a Major League baseball game, and a photobooth. In short, everything. (This was a lot like my first ‘hang-out’ with the Esq, minus the parade.)

You have to get a facial piercing, what do you get?
Nose, because I’ve done it before.

You have to get a tattoo, where and what do you get?
The alphabet, in varying sizes, colors and fonts, all over my body.

When is the last time you were in a photo booth taking pictures with friends?
The last time was with the Esq on his 25th birthday, back when I was 50,000 years old.

Are you mad about anything?
Just the small stuff, like how LESS THAN FIVE BUSINESSES IN AMERICA can control our entire economy and the federal budget.

Your good friend is getting beat up in a fight. Do you help out?
HELLZ YEAH I LIKE A GOOD FIGHT.

Do you like your first name?
Snotty is an adjective, and I like adjectives.