Kathryn Edwards

It’s that time of year again! The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are back and, it appears, better than ever! This season seems to be promising with lots of glamour, rumors of many rifts between the cast, changing alliances and the questioning of how sick Yolanda is. Unfortunately, we’re starting off this season with Yolanda and David announcing that they are divorcing.

Before I recap the episode, let’s start with their taglines.

I’ll admit, I like Lisa Rinna but after her dark tweets about Kim Richards last season, I’m very weary of her. Her tagline is superb but I feel like there’s a word missing from it… “shit.” I guess it’s pretty obvious where that word goes.

Not the most original but I don’t hate it.

First of all, she’s drop dead gorgeous. Second of all, nice tagline.

This is one of my two favorites of the taglines. Guess who’s the other. PS: Eileen is slaying in this dress! YAAAASSSS!!!!!

Yolanda looks beautiful, as usual. I guess her tagline is pretty indicative of what’s in store for her and us in the upcoming season.

And finally, the Queen. Lisa Vanderpump does it again! Another iconic tagline. She slays in her dress and she slays with her wit. YAAAASSSS!!!!

We start off with Pinky. She’s been asked to throw the first pitch at the dodgers game due to her support of the LGBT community. She and Rocio are waiting to see the trainer that will teach her how to throw the ball. It’s AJ Ellis. He’s a total hunk.

They’re in Lisa’s back yard, practicing. Ken tells Lisa to imagine that it’s Brandi that she’s throwing it to. Lisa says that she hasn’t seen or heard from Brandi since the reunion (because she’s been fired) and basically Brandi isn’t a part of her world anymore. Hallelujah!

Personally, I’m glad that Brandi’s gone. With that being said, let’s not give her anymore attention than she deserves, shall we?

Next up is Rin Tin Tin. She’s doing a special on Oprah’s Where Are They Now? She says that this is good because that means she had to be somewhere before. She doesn’t know where she is though. Kyle says she’s in an Amsterdam jail, LVP says she’s in a hot mess (true), Eileen says she’s hustling and Yolanda doesn’t know where Rinna is.

One thing’s for sure though, she’s like a cockroach so she’s not going anywhere. Rinna says that being on Days Of Our Lives was the longest she’s ever worked and she hasn’t had a long stable acting job (meaning a tv show) after that. So the fact that Eileen has been acting on soaps for over 30 years is, as Lisa puts it, rare. Speaking of Eileen, it’s time to check in.

Hey, girl, hey! Eileen says people have been asking her when she’ll retire from acting but I think she still has many years of her career ahead of her. Being on soaps, the storylines are always evolving and changing which keeps things fresh.

Her storyline this time is complicated business stuff and a love triangle involving her character, her character’s daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend. Yes, my mom loves Eileen.

Back to Rinna, she’s doing the interview with the producers from Oprah’s Where Are They Now? That’s about it. There wasn’t anything noteworthy from it… in my opinion.

Next up is Kyle. She’s at her store and apparently buying a pair of sunglasses worth $75,000. Wow. That kind of makes Dana look cheap. <Did you know? $25,000> Classic.

Pinky Vanderpump calls to confirm lunch with Kyle. Since they’re so close, Kyle walks on over. Kyle asks Pinky if she’s heard from Yolanda and Pinky says barely. She’s sent her texts but it seems Yolanda hasn’t responded. It could either be A. Because they don’t like each other, B. Because Yolanda is too sick and busy or C. All of the above. I’d go with C.

Pinky then asks Kyle how things are with her and Kyle says that she’s inked a deal with Warner Bros. to do a scripted show about her life growing up in the 70’s. Kyle is excited about it but she says both of her sisters haven’t wished her well or congratulated her on it. They’re worried about how they’ll be portrayed in the show basically.

Kyle feels that being the youngest out of 3 sisters, she still gets treated as the baby and sometimes the older ones might not think she’s capable of making her own decisions. But she’s a grown woman with 4 kids and she will make her own decisions. Okay, girl. Two snaps for you.

Time to check in with Yolanda. She’s living in David’s condo in Beverly Hills while she undergoes more treatments for her Lyme Disease. She looks defeated.

Her friend, Angie Simpson, pays her a visit. Sidenote: Angie was supposed to be a housewife this season but she had to stop filming because she couldn’t get a working visa. Hopefully she can get that resolved and try again next season. She seems lovely. #HelpHerWithHerVisaThing as @RHousewives101 said. Let’s get this trending.

Yolanda says that since her Lymes Disease diagnosis she’s felt totally useless, weak and hasn’t been able to drive her car for 3 years. Now, I don’t doubt Yolanda is sick, and sometimes I wonder if she’s exaggerating because of statements like this. I won’t be bashing her but I will point out some inconsistencies. I have to keep it real. So Yolanda says she hasn’t driven a car in 3 years but just last season we saw her driving from Malibu to Beverly Hills for the scavenger hunt. I wish she wouldn’t exaggerate because just one inconsistency can give everyone reason to doubt you.

She also says that if it weren’t for her kids she would have thrown herself off the balcony a long time ago. When she said that, my heart dropped. That’s truly heartbreaking.

Lisa Rinna calls her to invite her to her birthday dinner but Yolanda isn’t sure that she’s up to it, especially since David will be in Seattle. She says David has always been busy and travelling since the day they met and that shouldn’t change because she’s sick. I think it should have changed at least a little bit. That’s his wife.

It’s time for Pinky to throw the first pitch. She’s nervous and I would be too. The amount of people she’s performing in front of? A lot. Of course, Ken and Pandora are there to support her.

She throws the ball and it’s not as bad as she thought. “It could’ve been a fucking disaster, let’s be honest,” she says.

Back to Rinna. She’s taking her daughters shopping. She’s talking about how important it is to keep your kids humble and how hard it is to want to buy them everything they want but to also teach them the value of things. Her daughters are beautiful.

Eileen is doing some redecorating in her home. She doesn’t want to credit Brandi’s comments as her reasons for change but it did help her look at her house through another pair of eyes. “Hey, thanks… bitch,” Eileen says to Brandi. I love this woman.

Lisa Rinna calls her to offer her condolences about her father-in-law’s passing and to invite her to her birthday dinner. By the way Eileen is talking about him, it’s evident that they were pretty close. That was a nice tribute to him.

It’s time for Rinna’s birthday dinner. She picks up Kyle and they’re the first to arrive to the restaurant. Yolanda and Angie are the next to arrive. Kyle points out that Yolanda isn’t wearing any makeup and it’s shocking because she hasn’t seen Yolanda out in Beverly Hills without makeup.

Pinky Vanderpump and Ken arrive next. Ken tells Yolanda that she looks good but says in his confessional that she looks terrible. I’ll admit, when I first saw this I didn’t think it was nice. But after watching it again, I realized that when he said she looked terrible, he meant ill, and not trying to be mean about it. At least, that’s my interpretation of it.

Pinky is also pointing out that Yolanda isn’t wearing makeup and that she’s clearly not well.

Yolanda suddenly feels tired and feels that she has to go so she leaves. On the way home she says she feels happy that she went. I’m happy she went too but wasn’t really feeling some of the reactions her attendance created.

Harry Hamlin finally arrives and gives Rinna a beautiful pair of earrings. To say thank you she admits that he’s number 16 on her speed dial. #FixItGirr.

Mauricio comes home and Kyle talks to him about Kim. She says a part of her wants to reach out and the other part wants to show her tough love. I’ll be honest, I haven’t always been a fan of Kyle’s, but I really enjoyed her last season. With that being said, I don’t want her to keep using Kim as a storyline on the show. But then again, the show is about what’s happening in their lives and Kim is indeed a big part of Kyle’s life, so I don’t know. I still don’t like it, but I get it.

Kyle says she doesn’t know if their relationship will ever change for the better even if Kim does change for the better. I know it’s not my family, but here’s my input: I think they both need to accept the fact that they both have a ton of resentment towards each other and it probably will never go away. They are sisters but their relationship is toxic. For the sake of the children, I think they should take Pinky’s advice and kind of detach themselves emotionally from one another. I’m not saying they should detach completely, but just enough so that they can’t hurt each other anymore.

I think they should keep their relationship more lighthearted and if they feel like somebody is saying or doing something that is going to piss them off, then detach. It sounds like sweeping things under the rug but it’s not and it’s either that or years of family therapy which none of them seem to be willing to do.

Important to note that it seems that Kyle and Kim are in a much better place now. That makes me happy. I wish them a world of luck with that. On the road to recovery!

So that’s my recap of the first episode. Sorry I took so long to write it. What did you guys think of the episode? Did you absolutely love it or were you disappointed?