Destiny Herndon-De La Rosa’s narrow pro-life way

I’m watching the last 14 years of my life’s work crumble while someone with an anonymous email account tells me they wish my nazi bitch ass would die. Because now it’s their turn.

The alt-right is done decimating me, so the pro-choice left is coming to pick through the scraps.

If you haven’t been following this miserable saga, here’s a recap:

Several years ago, Herndon-De La Rosa founded the secular pro-life, pro-woman group New Wave Feminists, and Kristen Hatten joined her as VP four or five years later. Hatten was initially anti-Trump; but in 2016, she started showing signs of becoming a white nationalist. It was baffling, but undeniable; and so, a few years ago, Herndon-De La Rosa cut ties with her and scrubbed evidence of her from the organization, because, duh, they’re pro-life. You can’t be a white nationalist pro-lifer.

Hatten had been mostly inactive as a pro-lifer after being ousted from NWF, but her alt right views started to surface on the internet; and so on April 5, Herndon-De La Rosa made this statement denouncing her ideas and reiterating that they do not represent the ideals of NWF. She included five of the openly racist images Hatten had recently shared on her page.

Herndon-De La Rosa said:

***Please do not use this post as a reason to attack Kristen and spam her page. I simply needed to state this publicly so that it was on the record that she is not a part of NWF any longer (and hasn’t been since Nov. 2016), since unfortunately there still seems to be some confusion.***

I hate to have to do this publicly, but because many of you started following Kristen Hatten and her page “Chronicles of Radness” through NWF, I feel it’s necessary.

This is not the Kristen I knew. I don’t know what’s happened but she’s changed. As soon as we saw the very beginning of this transformation she was immediately removed from New Wave Feminists.

I’m posting this because many of you still follow her on social media, perhaps without even realizing the vile things she’s sharing, so take a look for yourself and decide if it’s something you support.

That should have been the end of it. Hatten is not especially prominent and didn’t have a large following; but genuine pro-lifers have no tolerance for hatred, racism, violence, antisemitism, etc., so it’s a good idea to make things nice and clear.

All the pro-lifers I knew were almost as horrified by Johnson’s defense of Hatten as they were by Hatten’s views themselves. What a dreadful disservice to the pro-life cause. Johnson tried to make the case that her behavior was charitable — that she operates by refusing to cut ties with people she disagrees with, and this is why she has refused to publicly challenge Hatten’s alt right statements, even though she was warned that refusing to distance herself from Hatten was damaging the pro-life movement which Johnson represents.

Johnson does communicate with people in the pro-choice movement; this is her work. But she very readily cuts ties with those in the pro-life movement who challenge her, and then erases evidence of her own troubling words. She routinely deletes comments that challenge her even in the mildest terms. So she is selective in which opponents she decides to maintain ties with.

Johnson has done good work. This is undeniable. Whether her recent behavior shows sympathy for Hatten or merely an astonishing thinness of skin, I truly do not know.

For practical purposes, it doesn’t matter. The damage was done. The Huffington Post and NARAL spotted the debacle for the PR disaster it is, and are now touting Hatten’s views and Johnson’s defense of her as evidence that the pro-life movement is riddled with alt-right rot:

Hatten’s views present a problem for the anti-abortion movement as it continues to jockey for mainstream acceptance and tries to distance itself from right-wing extremists. Throughout the history of the abortion wars, a great deal of violent energy has been generated at the confluence of anti-abortion activism and white supremacy. The first known murder of an abortion provider was committed by a former Klansman. The kinship isn’t hard to understand: Both are movements of the status quo, dedicated to preserving a white patriarchal order.

This is exactly what I said would happen when I wrote that if I were pro-choice, I’d vote for Trump. When pro-lifers don’t make it crystal clear that some ideas are unacceptable, the world leaps on the chance to make the case that those ideas are central to our cause.

So how, as pro-lifers, should we respond when someone who calls himself a pro-lifer behaves in abhorrent ways?

We have four choices:

1.We can ignore it, for any number of reasons, and hope no one notices.
2. We can be horrified at the damage this person is doing, and openly, strongly denounce the person and heap damnation on her head.
3. We can defend the person because we don’t think it’s right to attack people.
4. Or we can be horrified at the damage this person is doing, and openly, strongly denounce her ideas, and heap damnation on her ideas, and refrain from denouncing the actual person.

Because we are pro-life. Even pro the life of someone on the alt right.

That fourth option is the one Herndon-De La Rosa chose. Did it work?
No, of course not. Because the world is a disgusting place, and hungry for blood. Facts don’t matter; all that matters is that we can tear some flesh. And that’s why she’s currently suffering horrendous abuse from both sides, not only from the alt right but from the far left: Because she chose that narrow path that hates the sin but not the sinner.

I saw some pro-lifers savage Herndon-De La Rosa for not savaging Hatten; for not denouncing her thoroughly enough; for not repeatedly shouting from the rooftops that her former friend is now garbage.

But she chose the narrow road. It didn’t work, but it was the right thing to do. And when the righteous do the right thing, they are made to bleed. Cf Golgatha.

Please pray for everyone involved. If you are pro-life and so reject racism, please denounce racism and other alt right poison everywhere you see it, on the right and on the left. It’s our duty to make things crystal clear. But our goal isto save lives, and that includes the lives of the unborn, the lives of vulnerable minorities, and the lives of people who’ve allowed themselves to be swept into the ugly sewer of the alt right. The most vulnerable come first; but pro life means all lives. It is possible to take that narrow road. It’s not safe, but it is possible.

Hatten and others on the alt right are not past salvation. Their ideas must be publicly savaged. They themselves should be given a chance to repent. They will not repent if their ideas are tolerated; but they will also not repent if they are called human garbage.

Here is the key to knowing if the group you’re spending time with is powered by ideals, or by ideology: When you stand by your ideals, you will suffer. When you are fighting for an ideology, you will insist that others must suffer. Pro-lifers, which one sounds more pro-life to you? And are you willing to suffer for your ideals, or will you just find a new mob when your old one disappoints you?

Between this and not feeling any remorse for those terrible remarks that John Oliver unearthed (even writing an article in that fake news website The Federalist, no less), I think it’s time to do the same with Abby.

She did make a post on her Facebook page last week (excerpt below) that seems to own up to her mistake and (at least for me) puts the issue to rest. I respect the work that all of you (Destiny, Simcha, and Abby) do, and I hope and pray that you can all move forward from here in a positive way.

“In the past two weeks, there has been some talk about racism in the pro-life movement. It was suggested that I sympathize with white nationalism or white supremacy. I want to make it clear that is absolutely not true. I am disgusted by racism. It is appalling to me and has no place in the pro-life movement. However, I did make a comment giving a friend the benefit of the doubt instead of actually looking into what was said and how hurtful her words had been. Now that I have all the information, I know that I need to make an apology to anyone who has lost trust in me because of that comment.”

I feel the same way Brian. I give Abby a lot of credit for looking into this and taking a stand, and I also respect Simcha tremendously and hope that they will be able to reach a resolution, as they are both invaluable to the pro life movement.

Abby,
The fact that you have STILL not taken a position on this is very disturbing. Since you are such good friends with Kristen, why is it that you have not been in touch with her by now about this? And I find it hard to believe that someone whose livelihood depends on social media didn’t know about her blog and never saw anything troubling being posted on her Twitter. Your story doesn’t really pan out here. So, now that you have more facts and information, where do you stand? How do you feel about Kristen Hatten?

Surely it’s not THAT hard to believe. I am a mom of 7 and travel for a living. I don’t have a lot of time to look up blogs. 🙂

Honestly, I don’t know where I stand. I just found out about some wayback machine (I think that’s what it’s called) that will allow me to look at her blog. I’m told that’s where the most vile comments are. Once I’m able to do that, I will be able to have an educated opinion.

It’s really tempting to be utterly and completely tired of the pro-life movement.

I quit the day that a priest told me that pro-life activism is like Peter cutting off the high servant’s ear.

Don’t send those organizations with staff and office space a dime! Be suspicious of *anybody* whose daily bread is paid by abortion on EITHER side of the debate. Send it to Mother Teresa. There’s a shelter for homeless pregnant women in San Francisco (if you want to keep your tens and twenties in ‘Murica.) Something for everybody! Even for the creeps who love white babies best! (Maybe they can earmark their checks).

Ms. Hatten should have her DNA done. It doesn’t get whiter than my Mom’s side, but oh boy were there delicious surprises revealed in that Ancestry.com spit test. I’m still laughing. Hel-lo China, Africa and the Middle East! So, so enlightening, lol.

The English granddaughter of my mother’s, grandfather’s, brother –(who may very well be an albino) contacted me with exuberant excitement when Ancestry linked us as close cousins. She stopped talking to me abruptly when I told her I’d married a Latin American. I can’t even IMAGINE how one-note boring her pretend white life must be with WHITE taking up so much important head room. These people need to stop feeding on the lies they tell themselves, and step out of their dark, narrow closet and into the light. Good grief. How gross. No wonder Destiny walked away from the vomit and didn’t want to dialogue with it. Not everyone has the stomach for it.

Here’s another story for you from three weeks ago–right from the mouth of a child.

My 11 y.o. has a teacher that is almost 8 months pregnant, she took a sick day, and a substitute of surprisingly advanced age took over for her. We live in an extremely white community. My son is the darkest kid in his class and about as dark as my husband. My son came home shocked over the way she’d treated him. She insulted him and bullied him the entire day. At recess the kids gathered around him to give him some words of encouragement. They were incredulous she’d behaved that way. A little girl who is half Middle Eastern (and that had insisted on keeping him company so he wouldn’t be alone the first week of school), told him that she was sorry about how he’d been treated, adding, “I think she must think you’re Mexican.”

Out of the mouths of babes.

I don’t think any of us imagined how racist this country is. We were shocked when the white supremacists started chanting, out in the open. They rose to the top of the pond enabling others to dislodge from their hiding places and rise to the top of the pond with them. I never, in my wildest dreams thought that we would tolerate it. I thought he’d go down in flames– a laughing stock in America which was built on the shoulders of the unwanted. I thought the sexual assault that he admitted to on hidden camera would be the final cou de gras–an ignominious footnote for America’s hall of shame. A blip on a TV screen like an embarrassing TV show. Instead we elected him president! Oh. my. God.

In a small way, it’s almost better this way. It’s better to understand who we really are, and what we are actually dealing with–God help us.

Racism exists all over the world not just here. Asians look down on other Asians from different countries. Europe went to war twice because their neighbors weren’t “like them”. In India if you are not a Hindu you will never make a better life for yourself in their caste system. Rwanda slaughtered half their “lighter black skinned” countrymen two decades ago. The Balkans. The Sunnis and Shiites. On and on and on.

The pro-life movement is not the organization to convict of racism. Have you seen the demographic makeup of people praying outside abortion clinics that target African and Hispanic neighborhoods? They’re predominantly white!
Tell me, in what other country do you see one demographic begging another demographic NOT to exterminate itself?

Claire, racism is not a “white only” issue. You are implying that it is.

The abortion industry overwhelmingly targets African and Hispanic populations.
My point is that the pro-life movement is the only one out there trying stop that. This idea that pro-life movement has a racism problem doesn’t really hold water.

Anna Lisa, I’m so sorry that your son was treated this way. That is horrible. It’s sweet that he was concerned about stressing out his pregnant teacher, but the behavior of that substitute really needs to be addressed. (By the way, apparently there are two Claires on this thread; I’m the one who used to chat with you on Simcha and Jennifer Fulwiler’s NCR threads, the one with the “little” boy who has now reached double-digits!!!)

:)! Sweet. You’re big little guy is almost a teenager!!!! I hope you are all well.

I’ve always appreciated your conversation and level headed wisdom Claire! –Haha those were the wild west days of the internet on NCR. I rarely read it anymore…(when did the American Catholic world turn so upside down? I can’t stomach some of their hateful contributors anymore. They have no shame.

Yeah–I considered complaining about that sub–I still might. I’m not sure if I have the spiritual energy to fight that fire. What she represents is a generation and a mindset. I was explaining to my son that in the decade I was born into, there were still segregated drinking fountains. It’s hard to believe how recent that was.

Well, he’s not quite a teenager…he turned 10 in January, and it hit me like a ton of bricks! I stopped reading the NCR after they fired Simcha. That was the last straw. I do still watch EWTN, though. But I miss the conversations we used to have. I hope your family is well!

I believe in supporting efforts that help women and children directly. What have the jet set priests and their staffs done in fifty years?–They preach to the choir and never get their hands dirty. They stay in hotels and dine by candle light. There is a world of difference between The Little Sisters of the Poor, and them. How many millions and millions of dollars have been given to Judy Brown, or Pavone or Liesite News? How wretchedly sad it is that they fool themselves into thinking they are ending abortion in any way. Abortion is their idol.

If fifty years of donations had gone into a hedge fund specifically for pregnant women instead of paying for office space, and staff, every single woman who finds herself experiencing a crisis pregnancy wouldn’t have anything to worry about because all of her needs would be taken care of.

Peter tried to force the issue. His ideology fueled his fire. It’s not that his ideology was wrong, it’s that ideology has never converted a soul or poured oil on actual wounds.

Imagine Mother Teresa taking that first approach of Peter in the face of injustice. Imagine her holding a sign that said “abortion kills babies”, incessantly writing newsletters, running an office and contributing to political parties while being on a speaking tour *instead* of touching actual, wounded, human beings. Imagine her putting a 30-year-old, unburied, dead infant on an altar to elect a sex offender, instead of seeking out and rocking a living infant and feeding it real food? the world wouldn’t have said, “see how she loves her neighbor”, if she’d taken the approach of a freak show, (which calls to mind that I just got another appeal from Lifesite News today, begging for money while bashing our Holy Father–like Judas and unconverted Peter).

Peter eventually learned the difference between waging war, and being led to do something that he didn’t want to have to do.

As always, Simcha, thank you for your eloquence and willingness to shine a light where others hesitate. The fact that something like this even needs to be said is disheartening. Destiny is a pro-life warrior and people like her are why I’m still proud to be part of the pro-life movement despite so many missteps over the last two years.

Oh, for pete’s sake. Give it a rest, Abby. You deleted MULTIPLE comments and MULTIPLE posts, both on your own page and on others’ pages. You saw MULTIPLE screenshots of her racist ramblings and refused to disavow them, repeatedly. There are lots and lots and lots of screenshots of this, including of you complaining about how the screenshots YOU SAW of Kristen’s racism were taken “out of context” and how you still kept in touch with her and considered her a friend. And now you’re playing CYA and feigning the victim. Why not try for some humility and simply say “Gosh, I messed up, and I’ve done harm in this situation; I’m sorry”?

That’s correct. I deleted ALL of my comments after I realized I didn’t have the entire picture. I am very slow to call someone a racist. I find that Satan lives in impulsivity. I want to have ALL of the information before I call someone something like that. To call someone a racist basically means that they hate my son…and I don’t take that lightly. I would love to see some screenshots of her blog if someone has them.

Since Simcha didn’t have the integrity to actually come to me and directly ask me WHY I deleted my comment, I will go ahead and explain it here. I deleted my comment because someone asked me if I had looked at Kristen’s blog. Admittedly, I hadn’t. I didn’t even know her blog was a thing. I decided I would delete my post until I had all of the information and could make a better informed decision.

I went to Kristen’s blog and it had been removed from the internet. Because of that, I have not been able to make a statement because I don’t feel like I have all of the information.

To sow division where there is ignorance is shameful. The right thing to do would have been for Simcha to address this with me directly instead of making her own false assumptions.

Well, talk to Kristen and GET the information. Because it damages the pro-life movement to have racists involved. You are in a position of leadership; people look up to you. Act like it and take some responsibility.

That’s exactly what I have done. I have yet to hear anything FROM HER MOUTH that makes me think she is a racist. That’s why I wanted to see her blog content, but have been unable to access it. If you have some screenshots of that, I would love to look at them.

Abby,
I know the world puts a lot of weight on the word “racist” but I wish that Christian people weren’t so hesitant to use it. Just because Kristen is a racist doesn’t mean that she hates your son, just like calling me a glutton wouldn’t necessarily mean I’m trying to eat your cake right now. Racism is a sin just like adultery, gossip, self-righteousness, and anger, and most of us have probably had racist thoughts or actions at some point in our lives. Clearly identifying certain actions as sinful is not a wholesale condemnation of a person; it offers them an opportunity to repent. I think we should all stop asking for such a burden of proof for racism, and instead realize it is a habitual sin that most of us need to uproot in our own lives.
(Obviously, we have to use prudence when calling out other people’s sin. But if someone was proclaiming on the internet “Hey, Pope J0hn Pau1 fathered five children!” [letters changed to protect from search engines pulling this up] it would be completely fair to publicly post “This is a lie.” Same thing with what Kristen has been posting.)

There are enough screenshots in the internet that show how racist she is. You don’t need to see the blog. Also, it seems you have found enough time to respond to John Oliver when he uncovered a CD that proves that you are a phony by blogging in The Federalist a tantrum post calling him fake news, Drumpf-style, but you have no time to read Kristen’s posts. I find it somewhat fishy…

Yours,
Someone who has also been blocked from your Facebook page for challenging you in the mildest terms.

This is very disturbing. I have always admired Abby Johnson for her balanced approach to dealing with the pro-choice movement (her refusal to scream at abortion workers, tell them they’re going to hell, etc). She has adopted a biracial child, so I can’t imagine that she is racist. That being said, I have been on the receiving end of being deleted and blocked after very mildly and respectfully disagreeing on her facebook page. (This was after the election when I felt she was being insensitive to people who were upset about Trump winning.) When I emailed her to tell her that I have donated to her organization in the past and didn’t appreciate being blocked, her response was that her admins are in charge of deleting comments and blocking people. She reinstated me and since then I have given her the benefit of the doubt, but reading this article makes me wonder…the division in the pro-life movement is feeding right into the hands of the pro-choice movement.

There is no division here on my end. I deleted my comment because I realized I didn’t have all of the information to make a declarative statement that Kristen “wasn’t a racist.” It seems the only person here sowing division is Simcha. She failed to reach out to me directly to ask WHY I had deleted my post and instead chose to make foolish assumptions about my actions.

I’m really not sure why you placed your comment about bullies as a reply to my comment, which was a perfectly respectful response to Abby. I’m not trying to bully her at all. I really do hope she and Simcha can have a dialogue about this, although I acknowledge that would be difficult at this late stage.

Thank you Colleen for saying this! I don’t appreciate reading these nasty comments about Abby, either. Why the attack on a fellow Christian who has dedicated her life and makes untold sacrifices for the protection of unborn children?

In this post, Simcha pointed out that Abby has a habit of deleting comments that even mildly challenge her. I was responding to that statement by acknowledging that I have been on the receiving end of that (undeservedly, considering that I usually “like” and affirm everything she posts, I donate to her organization, and the one time I did disagree, I did it in a respectful manner). I also said that I gave her the benefit of the doubt when she said it was her admins who did that, not her, and I said that I didn’t think she is racist considering that she adopted a biracial baby. I then went on to thank Abby for clarifying her stance in this situation. There are people on this thread who have been very critical of Abby; I am not one of them. So if anything is ridiculous, it’s calling me a bully. Again, this type of division is feeding right into the hands of the pro-choice movement and the devil. We’re supposed to be on the same side here.

It was a comment directed to everyone being critical of Abby Johnson on a post about pro-life racists.
1. I have never met one. Ever.
2. The furthest person from such a thing is Abby Johnson.
3. It’s grade school behavior to group jump on Abby for perceived personal slights on a post that has NOTHING to do with her.

This is the last time I’m going to respond to you, because there’s apparently another Claire on this thread, and it’s starting to get confusing. I’m not jumping on Abby, and I’m not part of a group that is jumping on her. And I wasn’t referring to a perceived personal slight. I was referring to what Simcha categorized as a pattern of hers. It’s red flag when someone silences people by habitually deleting even mildly dissenting comments, even those that come from people who have financially supported their ministry. When it happened to me, Abby told me it was caused by overly-zealous admins, and I took her at her word, continued to follow her, and wrote a hefty check to her ministry a month later. When Simcha identified it as an ongoing pattern, my ears pricked up. However, Abby then clarified why she deleted the comments (because she wanted to get the full story before allowing her thread to be a platform for something that she didn’t have all the facts on), and I accepted what she said and thanked her for clarifying. If you want to continue to make me the enemy, that’s up to you. But if you look through this comment thread, you will see people who have been quite critical of Abby and who have not changed their stance, while I wasn’t even critical of her, I was just questioning and raising a concern, and after she clarified I did change my stance. But it seems like that’s not good enough for you and you’re not interested in resolving anything, you’re just more concerned about being right. As mutual pro-lifers, I’m sorry that we have been unable to resolve this.

Ya know, Abby, I would be a bit sympathetic to your response if I did not have personal experience of seeing you delete your stuff, and your relationships with others, in the past, maliciously, on multiple occasions. I know more than one person who has left an organization that you were a part of because of your behavior.

You really ought to pause before you go using words like “shameful” and “if she had the integrity”. You are not perfect, and you have done a lot of damage, too.

I KNOW I’m not perfect. I actually have a career telling hundreds of thousands of people every year that I helped murder over 20,000 innocent children. But I do always hope that people in journalism will operate with integrity. It may be wishful thinking. Simcha knows me. She knows how to get a hold of me. It would have been nice if she would have simply asked me instead of making assumptions. It’s pretty simple. And honestly, shouldn’t even have to be said.

This is why this is actually called “detraction.” Once again, original sources aren’t confirmed, the motivations are considered spurious, and real people’s lives are shaken up. Let us assume the best of each other. PLEASE.