Fun, fun, fun.

Well, this is interesting. The elf has literally just informed me that I've been replaced by a near clone. Granted, this is her third boyfriend since we broke up, but it still hurts. Even now I've entertained the thoughts that we might get back together... I knew it was very unlikely, but the thought still crossed my mind at times. This leaves me in a sticky situation. She'll get inwardly jealous if she finds out about the new girl (or at least she has for every previous one), and I'm jealous because she's got a new guy. And double that since he looks like me "but with shoulder-length strawberry blonde hair. You can't compete with that, hon." If my hair would go shoulder-length instead of making me 6' tall as opposed to my normal 5'6".....

Right now I could really use wonderful near... curled up on the couch and just talking and hugging like the night we met. It's not like we've even come close to connecting on a personal level like elf and I had, but it's nice having someone interested and near by.

And of course this is all after I start growing this rediculous goatee based only on my roommate and elf's suggestions. (Granted, the scraggly uneven thing has gotten a few complements after only a week, but I've seen equal numbers of people bite their lips to keep from laughing.)

How do I tell wonderful that I want to be with her when I can't let go of elf? And why do I still have the urge to tell elf my feelings when I've already done so to the point of physical pain from repetitve listening on her part? And why the hell isn't a large teddy bear standard equipment for a young adult male's household?