Panettone$

Usually I dismiss $65 jars of honey or spice blends when I see them written up in publications. I am naturally skeptical and also aware of the PR machine that drives most food journalism these days, so I assume the products are bullshit. Except for when I don’t. Like when I pay $50 (DOES. NOT. INCLUDE. SHIPPING.) for a panettone because Charlotte Druckman told me to. Druckman appreciates a good pastry more than most people and her NY Times article[1] convinced me this was an important financial investment. Also, I was able to use the excuse of Valentine’s Day to justify this as a gift to myself (and Bryan, I guess).

Well, the posh panettone arrived from the kitchen of pastry chef Roy Schvartzapel[2] yesterday. I cannot overstate the wonders of this panettone. It is the actual, literal Best. I have eaten many panettones in my day, and some of them I genuinely enjoyed and none of them, in retrospect, came anywhere near this amazing loaf of gluten and sugar-filled magic. It is both incredibly rich and light as a feather. The additions to the dough (in my case, pistachios, raspberries, and milk chocolate) are of the highest quality. The crunchy sugar clinging to the dome is a dream. It is perfect and is truly worth every penny. Roy, you’ve convinced me. Will buy from seller again. I love you.

But can we talk about the packaging? At first I was like, cool—nice packaging! Then I realized how much the packaging looks like fragrance packaging from the 90’s, like some knock-off Calvin Klein fragrance. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But then I started to read the packaging and Roy started to make me a little nervous. He gets kind of intense:

Gotta love his passion, though!

So, I am here to help empower you to spend your paycheck on a panettone. Because you’re worth it. Also, they keep for two three weeks so you can be eating this for a while. Also, Valentines Day. Actually, now that I think of it, the best person to buy one is a single person who lives along because you get to eat all of the bread yourself. Bryan, unfortunately, thinks he is entitled to half of mine.