Homeschooling with eyeliner.

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Thoughts on the People’s Choice Awards.

Ah, awards season. How I love you. There are three things in life that I desperately enjoy- being opinionated, doing weird and wonderful things with Kahlua, and wasting days watching TV and movies. Award shows allow me to combine all three of them, and oh! So much fun.

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I love how the People’s Choice Awards just basically honor the movies you are too embarrassed to admit that you enjoyed. Somehow, telling someone that 27 Dresses was the most fun move you’ve seen all year is just not cool, but clicking it online totally is.

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Seal is singing…James Brown? For no reason? And now talking about how the world wouldn’t be anything without a woman or a girl? I am so confused and I do not know why he’s talking. Oh, he’s giving Carrie Underwood an award. Huh. Interesting.

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You know what I think my major problem with Katy Perry’s “I Kissed A Girl” is? The cherry Chapstick line. Who wears cherry Chapstick after like second grade? I mean, when I was eight, cherry Chapstick was where it was at. It was like this close to makeup! And goodness knows that you are all grown up as soon as you can wear makeup!

I’ll be honest, I’ve never kissed a girl. Nor do I have any desire to. But I imagine that if you’re drunkenly making out with another girl while maintaining your heterosexuality, you are probably going to smear on some lipgloss. I’m just thinking.

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I do not approve of Dakota Fanning going through puberty. She is supposedly to be adorably tiny and missing her front teeth. She is not supposed to have breasts. I suggest someone takes care of this before it gets out of hand.