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Today marks the 25th death anniversary of my father. He was a brilliant inventor, a so-so entrepreneur and a progressive communist.

He shunned all things pretentious and can speak heart to heart with anyone - from the president of the country to the street prostitute (but he does have a flaw of discriminating against idiots).

We had intense arguments but we always have love and respect for each other. I might not be able to visit his grave (long story) and i know this blog entry might be a cheeky way to write a commemoration to him, but i go along with the times and use this modern medium to remember a person who had such a strong positive influence to my existence and the values i hold.

As energy is neither created nor destroyed but transforms from one form to another, my thoughts and love to the 21grams of positive, passionate, pained energy unleashed unto the universe at 5 am on the 22nd of December 1988, the day he took his own life.

Author's note: This post is only advisable to those contemplating on a career in the beauty biz. Can apply to bloggers who want to dig deeper, students or new graduates who want to enter the corporate side of the biz, etcetera. Not worth shit for all others.

And forewarning, uncensored language- not for the squirmish.
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I regularly receive "Dear Auntie Rowena" emails from those aspiring for a career in the beauty business. Through these, I have met many a passionate individual willing to share me their story- and for that i feel so privileged, thank you. I get fielded with questions like what course to take, how do i make myself interesting enough to land a job, what should i be training myself to do and all that shit.

I have also been told that a school in L.A. offers a major in beauty industry marketing and merchandising. The school apparently says that "one should definitely study on their major in order to get into a beauty company because their programs are so much specialized than any other 4 year University" and for only $29,300 per year.

Well, er, fuck that. No one is required to take a specialized course and this is definitely not a requirement to get in the biz. Though we get people who are clever, personable, ambitious and passionate (and yes, have a college degree)- most things are learned as you go along.

But heck, some of you are more driven than others and would do anything to get ahead- and i have a lot of respect for that. But I do not wish you to fall into financial abyss by following your passion.

So I have been promising each and everyone that i will hold online courses on the corporate side of beauty and this post is a start towards that.

First of all, i will be straight with you what this course is and is not .

Personally, I will not shove it to your face. I do not think anyone 'needs' this course.

Will it give you practical knowledge on how the business works? Yes. Will it give you a headway and make you do your job well? Yes. Do you need it to get a job? No. Do I guarantee it will land you an interview? No.Will you be better prepared for an interview? Yes.

As well, though I have successfully managed a whole global brand, I have my limitations.

I am not a chemist. I do not talk ingredients or formulations.

I am not a makeup artist. I do not do how-to's and do not get all ga-ga over textures

I have 'attitude problems'. I will not scrub anyone's balls to get ahead. And I give my people credit for what I myself have done well and own up to their blunders. If you want to go corporate, this attitude will not do.

I am very good at what i do but I am not passionate about cosmetics. And life is too short to spend your life doing things just because you are good at them.

So anyway, my plan is to have short courses where you can enroll in one or more as you want and i can release them in phases. But to get into the succeeding ones, the first basic course i would suggest. I have not finalized the courses but i give you more details what they are about.

As this is a start, I do not want to offer it to a lot of people, just 20 per course. Being the course's willing guinea pigs*, the first 20 will have access to the course's future improvements and updates - provided you give me your no bullshit feedback which i will work on.*marketeers will call you pioneers to make you feel good buying but i am not to mince my words here just to sell.

No, i will not offer a money back guarantee, so if you are not sure, ask me more questions- i will tell you no lies. And if in doubt, don't do it. I have seen enough self proclaimed wunder yogi rock star guru samurai "experts" out there who will promise you invincibility to sell more. Fuck that. I will only do it if there is truly an unforced "need" for it.

So, after all that and you still think you need special beauty business courses, read on what courses there are that i can comfortably offer as an "authority" -

Beauty quickie A general overview of the cosmetics market from a corporate vantage point, how to evaluate a brand, how to prepare for an interview, sample actual interview questions, links to useful references. This course is very basic but i suggest it anyway so you can have better understanding of the context of the future courses. Though it will give you concepts and buzzwords, this does not give practical knowledge to do a good job once inside.Waiting list of 50 but will preselect the first 20. Approx price 300€.

Beauty business strategy. From business expectation to industry, country, competitor analysis, to product line strategy, forecast. This course is number heavy. Brush up on your excel skills prior to start of course.

Brand pyramid and product story. Understand and dissect the context under which a brand operates and build the story about it.This course has both theory, case studies and your own brand assignment.

Emotional branding. How to train your eye on imagery and design your own brand image.This course is image heavy with lots of exercises. It will help you dissect an advertisement and understand the "story" behind it. I suggest you take this after a brand pyramid background to have more "context".

Product Development. Primer on product development: basics of product development, prepare a brief that will be taken seriously by your suppliers, finding and evaluating suppliers, how to conduct plant visits. Will cover all textures and packaging types.

Image Development. Construct imagery for a brand - how to plan and supervise an image shoot (with models), how to plan and supervise a product and texture shoot. I would advise this course only after courses 3 and 4 so you can have better context in planning and which is a good foundation for execution.

So if seriously interested, push this button and send me your email. I will perhaps ask you some standard question for preselection purposes and give you more details on when to start.

Author's Note: This article appeared in a local Asian daily.. It is profanity-free and fit for mass consumption. I am keen to know what you think.

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Just when you think you have enough lipstick, mascara, foundation and moisturizer stashed to last you till the shoulder pad’s second coming, there will come a New Truly Amazing Wunderkind of a Cosmetic Miracle that will send you rushing to the checkout counter faster than Apple can come out with the next generation iPhone.

DON’T. Just not yet.

As someone who worked in the global beauty industry developing these products with “irresistibly compelling arguments,” I would like to give you an insider’s guide on what the claims really mean to help you thresh out the real cosmetic gems from the run-of-the-mill rubble.

Here, without further ado, the 10 worst reasons to buy cosmetics:

10. Because “some proceeds will go to charity.”

Cosmetic companies identify with charities that they know their customers will like (children, animals, nature, aids, woman related issues), donate a miniscule amount to the charity’s high visibility PR programs and write off their expenses against taxes.
Want toreallyhelp charity? Skip the mediocre lipgloss, let the cosmetic company pay their due in taxes that help propel the nation’s growth and donate straight to the charity of your choice without commercial intermediaries.
Try Kiva.org and be instantly gratified for empowering micro entrepreneurs who try to make a difference or bahay amihan, a foundation that helps empower solo parents.9. Because it “contains the ingredient proven/ known to cure…”

Whenever you see this claim and feel swayed by it, walk away. It is a common play on words used by marketeers to mislead. Product contains the ingredient but in proportions too small to deliver the benefit, yet enough to get away with claiming that ingredient is there all right. So that means, ingredient, present; benefit, absent.

8. Because it has a (pseudo-) medical practitioner’s “seal of approval”

Here’s the deal: all commercially-marketed products have to comply to one regulating body that sets the rules of what is safe for consumption. For us, that regulating body is the BFAD/FDA which has standard regulations, procedure and government-set fees.
When a “seal of approval” is given by other medical and pseudo-medical associations, it does not mean that a product complied with additional standards. It means that the brand outbid other brands to pay a large sum to get the exclusive seal of approval. This large amount goes to the association’s coffers controlled by the association’s officers. Not that I am implying anything but read between the lines.

7. Because it is “dermatologically tested.”

A corollary of the medical practitioner’s seal of approval, of all the claims a product can have, this is the most meaningless. Just ask this question: Dermatologically tested for what?

6. Because it is “kind to animals.”

All products are subject to the same rules and are in the same boat. They all use ingredients that have been previously tested on animals, otherwise, they would not get BFAD approval to trade. But the good news for animal lovers is that companies are not required to do anymore testing for ingredients that have been previously tested. So to claim no animal testing, cruelty free –– whatevs –– is just academic. And to insist and brag that a company is really vigilant on this one, is one big income-generating PR hype.
FYI, if a product claims to be truly innovative, they will have to test on animals to prove their claims. If they say they don’t, then be wary of that innovative claim. On another note, you cannot claim to support animal testing, then support AIDS research — because AIDS research tests on animals.

5. Because it has “patent pending innovation.”

This is how it works: If you tweak the percentage of an ingredient in a formula, or change three dimensions of your packaging –– you can already file for a patent. That doesn’t mean it will be approved though –– the process can take months to years and most times, the patent will be disapproved or just dropped. But the beauty is the company is allowed to claim to have a patent pending innovation –– and rake in sales. Patent pending? Just say no.

4. Because it is “natural.”

Foregoing the obvious argument that everything surrounding us comes from nature and is thus natural, there is no one guideline or regulation about where to draw the line and what can be claimed natural. So, what is the point?

3. Because it is “hypoallergenic.”

If you are not particularly allergic to a certain ingredient, why go for a hypoallergenic brand that rids itself of fragrances, all active ingredients then pay dearly for it? It is a manic preoccupation with needless sanitation that is costing you dearly. And get this: the term hypoallergenic is “self-controlled” –– BFAD has no predefined/accepted definition for it. So, why bother?

2. Because “ X% of women agree that …”

Ah, lying with statistics! All it takes to get a favorable statistical result is a well-chosen panel size and ambiguous questions. And if that test can be done in-house(which it almost always is),even better. And besides, your beauty is unique. No matter if 100 percent of women agree, they are not you, are they?

1. Because it is expensive.

A product is expensive because it chooses to be so. It has a higher profit margin because it has to pay for seals of approval, advertising, endorsers and its exclusive distribution channel. A higher percentage of the product cost goes to packaging, not the formula. Expensive is not an assurance that a product is good. Most times you can find exact replicas of expensive products in a mass market brand in less flashy packaging. (However, if you are buying expensive so you can brag to your friends, that is another issue altogether.)

So far, I have discouraged you from swiping that almighty plastic. But then, when Mr. MasterCard is burning a hole in the your handbag, you ask, “Okay, ex-beauty insider, what, in Santa Madonna’s name, are the right reasons to buy cosmetics?”

Well, unlike purchasing electro-gadgets that require a fair amount of Google-fu and comparative reasoning, in cosmetics, what you should trust most are your five senses and the omni-sapient feminine instinct.

Try the product first without buying. Let that overly zealous beauty rep demonstrate and make her day.Take your time to smell the faint aroma on your bare skin, feel how the texture easily subsides as you apply it, marvel at how weightless it feels, how easily it blends or how the color looks on you in different lights. Enjoy the moment and let your senses be seduced by the product.

Happy? Good. Do not purchase it yet. Walk away. (Tell the rep that you need to wear it a few hours to judge how long it lasts.) Go through the rest of your day, continue with your “lechevitrine” (the fancy French term for window shopping — literally translated, “lick the window“), see the leatest chick flick, share a bottle of New World Merlot with your bestie ora capuccino à la viennoisefor the sage –– then sleep on it.

If, after this exercise, you do not have a sentimental recollection of the product and do not care much about it –– then forget it. If, however, it is something you fell in love with, enjoyed wearing and gave you thatj’en sais quoiglow that your friends cannot put a finger on ––and remembered the morning after –– then you have got yourself a winner.

Go for it. Get that product and include it in your vast beauty armament.

For in cosmetics, there is only one good reason to buy ––

and that is because it makes you look and feel pretty.

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Rowena has launched more than 700 cosmetic products, trained managers around the globe on branding by design and was responsible for the resurrection of a top global makeup brand. Her blog, quoted and referenced by international beauty bloggers, is heralded by Elle International magazine as the cosmetic industry’s answer toThe Devil Wears Prada.