Dispatches from Bat Country, where proper medication is optional.

Warning

Do you have legal problems? Reading this blog will not help. In fact, it will probably make them worse, and it will definitely make you feel worse. You don't want that. If you think you may need legal representation, find yourself a good lawyer--preferably one who is recommended by other lawyers.

Because I’m a Product of Kansas Public Schools

Anonymous Comment Policy

Anonymous comments will not be posted as anonymous. If you try to post an anonymous comment, I will do one of two things: 1. Delete your comment without approving it, or 2. Post it with your name and/or email address listed for public consumption. The choice is mine. The only exception is for those individuals with whom I am already familiar. Also, links within comments will be deleted. Now, if you (or your scumbag marketer) choose to leave a spam comment, then anything is fair game. This includes your IP address, email, and anything else I see about you. You will be fully exposed. This is your only warning.

Legal Stuff

Here is the obligatory stuff for people who take the words of others far too seriously, too literally, too emotionally, or a little of each.

INFORMATION ON THIS SITE IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE.
The opinions expressed in this site represent only the opinions of the author(s) and are in no way intended as legal advice upon which you should rely. Every person's situation is different and requires an attorney to review the situation personally with you. They are opinions, and mine only.

NO ATTORNEY-CLIENT RELATIONSHIP CREATED.
This site does not create an attorney-client relationship. Such a relationship can only be accomplished by execution of an agreement between any author or contributor to this site and a prospective client.

What are you doing?

A Most Wonderful Time For Me

Ah, the Mall of America. Just sitting there, chocked-full of stuff. All for me. (Photo credit: Matti Mattila)

Thank goodness for the holiday season.

For the rest of the year, I’m constantly badgered by potential clients and family members wanting me to help someone (or themselves). Sure, I charge for my services, but I also realize that I give far more than I receive. If I truly charged for all of my time and efforts, I’d earn 3-4 times what I earn now. Call it bad business. Call it careless accounting. Either way, I spend the majority of the year giving and attempting to care for others–often more than they care for themselves.

Then, things slow during the holiday season. The attentions of others are diverted to their family and friends, and they forget about me for a few weeks.

Finally, a chance to focus on myself and those close to me. During this small window of time, I need to act quickly and decisively. Thankfully, commercialism helps me to make split-second decisions to benefit myself and those who I’d rescue from a fire before you.

Flip on the TV and bam, in 15 minutes I receive a short synopsis of everything I could possibly want, need, or give during this festive time of year. The internet is even better, with ads on all my favorite websites leading me to lush depictions of everything I could ever dream of owning or gifting. Thanks to big, corporate America, I’m able to give and get more than just corduroy pants.

They also throw a couple of well-timed distractions to cause others to focus less on legal issues and more on spending those potential retainers on exciting and thoughtful do-dads.

So, thank you commercialism. Thank you corporations. Thank you government subsidies in support of the aforementioned two. Because of you, I can make the most of giving to #1 this yuletide season. Otherwise, I’d be forced to spend another couple of weeks helping others and not thinking solely of myself.

Nobody wants that. After all, it sounds like something Christ would do.