Dave Hanratty’s Winners & Losers – Day 7

In between offering dry observations on the World Cup and its Winners and Losers, our Dave spends his time drumming for upcoming band After The Explosions, to learn more please visit http://bit.ly/9TW5rL.

Winners

The viewers

As hoped, the second round of group matches has brought with them a palpable sense of excitement, with the Slovenia/USA match in particular arguably producing the best contest of the tournament thus far.

Algeria

Looking nothing like the team that were put to the sword by Ireland a few weeks ago, the Algerians played with ambition and conviction. Unfair critics will accuse them of packing ten behind the ball and suffocating England, but those critics will likely be bitter England fans. In truth, Algeria gave England a game and but for a decent striker things could have been even worse for Fabio Capello’s men.

Serbia

Rode their luck and won ugly, tearing Group D wide open in the process.

Nemanja Vidic

Following his recent escape in the Carling Cup final and today’s Superman impression to concede the penalty; does Vidic have some dirt on referees that keeps him from getting sent off?

Landon Donovan

Carried his team on his shoulders and deserves a better club than L.A. Galaxy. Let’s hope he returns to the Premier League soon.

Losers

England

Ouch. Perhaps the most worrying (and unsurprising) thing about England’s rotten brand of football is their inability to play together as a team. Make no mistake, this is a collection of selfish individuals determined to get their names on the scoresheet and photograph in the paper. By contrast, USA, who every English pundit will tell you are a far inferior team to England, rose above their perceived weaknesses in both their games so far, united as a team to overcome the obstacles that lay before them.

A great football team isn’t necessarily eleven world class players, but eleven men who can operate together in sync and fight for one another. On the basis of their World Cup campaign thus far, England are drowning in a sea of ego, poor tactics and curious team selections. They go into their final game against Slovenia next Wednesday needing to win (or draw depending on how things fare for USA) and should they produce a performance similar to their first three hours of this World Cup, they will be watching the second round from the comfort of their hotel rooms.

Fabio Capello

Not the birthday surprise he would have wanted.

Wayne Rooney

Dismal and anonymous, the “white Pele” stormed off the field mouthing “It’s nice to be booed by your own fans eh?” after the final whistle. While booing your own team is pretty ugly behaviour, the travelling fans will have spent an awful lot of money for the privilege of seeing their country woefully underperform and are perhaps entitled to vent their frustrations.

Alan Hansen

Made a big deal of sarcastically mocking the Slovenia/USA match before a ball was even kicked. Roy Hodgson dared to suggest it would be an entertaining game, cue Hansen and his childish bullshit. Of course, this being BBC, he wasn’t the only pundit to behave like a cretin…

Gary Lineker

“Message to watching Americans; that’s what makes football so special”. Way to take the shine off a great match by being a patronising wanker Gary.

Germany

Quite a contrast to their total football demolition of Australia on Sunday, the Germans suffered their first defeat at the group stages in the World Cup finals since losing to Denmark in 1986. Harshly reduced to ten men in the first half, Sami Khedira saw a goalbound effort cannon back off the crossbar and Lukas Podolski conspired to miss a penalty, rounding off a performance mired in such bad luck that even Mick McCarthy was moved to say that he almost felt sorry for them.

Kazuki Ito

A name that strikes fear into the heart of Pro Evolution Soccer 6 fans everywhere. Innocuous halfway-line challenges punished by straight red cards were par for the course when Kazuki took to the virtual field. In real life however, his legend is looking like it may be eclipsed in South Africa.

Referee Alberto Undiano Mallenco dished out no less than nine yellow cards including one red for the unfortunate Miroslav Klose in a game that was rarely ill-tempered. The Spanish referee has something of a card-happy reputation, having doled out an impressive 11 red cards in 17 La Liga games that he took charge of last seasion. Such a stat makes it all the more mind-boggling that Nemanja Vidic stayed on the pitch following his blatant handball. Speaking of dodgy refereeing decisions…

Koman Coulibaly

The Malian official somehow disallowed what would have been a winning goal for the Americans. The offence? Apparently by allowing themselves to be manhandled by the Slovenian defence they committed a foul. Poor show. See what you think…

Miroslav Klose

Even harsher than the red card Tim Cahill suffered when he lined up against Klose on Sunday.

Lukas Podolski

Having scored in the first game, Podolski was in prime position to further silence his critics when he stepped up to take a routine spot kick. Naturally his weak effort was saved.

Drawers

USA

And so USA continue to write their World Cup story in the manner in which they started. A terrible start followed by an impressive fightback to level things in a game that they could have won. Landon Donovan’s goal early in the second half was a stunning individual effort made all the more amusing by the sight of goalkeeper Samir Handanovic recoiling in terror as the ball rocketed towards his face.

Daddy’s boy Michael Bradley sealed an impressive comeback and but for the efforts of the referee, the Americans would have been in a much more comfortable position come the final whistle. As it stands, they still have a chance to progress, but there could be some last minute melodrama. Fitting.

Slovenia

A case can be made for them to reside in the Winners column despite the draw, but the reality is that following an unlikely lead, Slovenia threw away a glorious opportunity to seal qualification into the next round. They very well may progress but it’s now a much more difficult prospect than it could have been.