The "monitor reset" command is included because generally it is needed for a successful connection. See SEGGER's J-Link documentation for more details of this command. But if you have found a particularly situation where removing it allows your debug connection to work, then simply remove it and resave the launch configuration. The modified version will then be used by your project for future debug sessions.

You will find more information on what is going on during a debug connection in the Console view, in particular the JLinkServer console. This may give you some clues as to what is actually happening in your setup.