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Kim Palmer

Sybok: Let us explore it...
together. Each man hides a secret pain. It must be
exposed and reckoned with. It must be dragged from the
darkness and forced into the light. Share your pain.
Share your pain with me... and gain strength from the
sharing.

Kirk: Damn it, Bones, you're a doctor. You know that
pain and guilt can't be taken away with a wave of a
magic wand. They're the things we carry with us, the
things that make us who we are. If we lose them, we lose
ourselves. I don't want my pain taken away! I need my
pain!

This has always reminded me of scientologists who
talk of freeing themselves of their reactive mind. It
is my belief that every experience we have, every
memory, every event (even if we do not actually remember
it) is part of who we are — to "free"
ourselves of it is to dismiss our experience and
invalidate who we are. We are who we are because of
what we have experienced — painful experiences
teach us something about who we are — tragedies
happen — loss happens — should I
abandon who I am for some flaky philosophy that says
free yourself from your reactive mind. What would I
become? An empty shell of who I was — and all
that pain and experience will still be there regardless
of how many hours I spend auditing. It is who I am — how
I came to be — you cannot "free" yourself from
that. You can change how you react to things but you
cannot free yourself — there is no such thing
as a state of clear — or OT. We are who we are
because of what we have experienced. [...]»