The L.A. Woman

Rita Wilson talks to Tom Ford about Hollywood, commitment, and the one mistake they'll never make.

TOM FORD: First of all, you are one of the few people in the world who seem to be, from the outside, absolutely fearless. You'll say to me, "My goal this year is to do a Broadway show." Or "My goal this year is to record an album." And every single thing you have ever said to me, you have accomplished! Where do you get that confidence, strength, drive?

RITA WILSON: Everything I do scares the hell out of me. I'm always anxious. But as you get older, you worry less about what people think. A while ago I decided that there are certain characters I'm not going to do anymore. I thought, "Oh, my God, I cannot play one more warm, nurturing, kind, understanding mother, girlfriend, daughter, wife, sister." So I'm lucky because I get to play a really tough lawyer on The Good Wife and a narcissistic mother on Girls, and that's really fun.

TF: Most people thought of you as an actress, and now you have this incredible music career. You've performed at Disney Hall and Carnegie Hall and recorded an album. What made you decide you wanted to get serious about your singing?

RW: I asked myself, "What do I want?" And I decided that I had to have music in my life in a more prevalent way.

Kerry Hallihan

TF: Why?

RW: It's addicting. I always want more. Getting involved in the music world led me to make an album, AM/FM, which came out in 2012. From there I got all sorts of incredible opportunities. I got to write songs with Kara DioGuardi and Jason Reeves, and that was an incredible experience. I love going down to Nashville to write with the amazing people there, and I write with great people in L.A. too.

TF: How old were you when you decided to focus more on music? I think it's very empowering for women to understand that you can swing in different directions and emphasize different parts of your personality in different periods of your life.

RW: It was right around the time I did Chicago on Broadway in New York, in 2006. Doing that reignited and reawakened how much I love music. Also, music and theater both embrace women, not young girls. You can be on the stage until who knows when. I mean, I just saw Angela Lansbury a couple of years ago in A Little Night Music. Fifty can be just the beginning of things. Nora Ephron gave me a toast when I turned 50—

TF: I was there!

RW: Yes, you were! And she said, "I'm here to tell you that great things happen after 50. I did not direct my first film until I was 50." And that was so inspiring.

TF: Hollywood is a notoriously difficult place to build long-lasting, genuine friendships. How do you manage it?

RW: People roll their eyes about "Hollywood marriages," but Tom [Hanks] and I have been married almost 26 years, and I've only known one couple that's gotten divorced. But nobody likes to focus on happy stories, so you don't hear about them so much. My parents were married for 58 years before my dad died, so I grew up with that model. I love the idea of commitment.

TF: It's rewarding. But you don't think it's hard?

RW: Commitment isn't hard. I never doubt the commitment. But things come up in life. Everyone has hardship and loss. But commitment is the foundation. There is such value in the depth of your relationships, your friendships, your marriage, your children, all of that. To me, that's what makes you feel safe to go out and pursue the things that are more risky.

"Everything I do scares the hell out of me. I'm always anxious. But as you get older, you worry less about what people think."

TF: What's the biggest mistake, looks-wise, that you see among women your age in Hollywood? Actually, we both know the answer because we talk about it all the time: overuse of filler!

RW: I love the way women's faces look, period. I'm never going to be the person who says you shouldn't do things, but sometimes it's like women don't really see themselves. When you focus on one body part and you go, "Oh, my God, this is so bad, I have to do something about it," and then you change it, you start to lose perspective. You focus on this minute detail, and then it overtakes everything. At the end of the day, those procedures don't necessarily make people look better; they just make people look different from how they did before.

TF: We're hyperaware because we are all being filmed now. Everyone's doing selfies and watching themselves on their computer screens. On that note, do you believe in such a thing as dressing for your age?

RW: It does cross my mind. But whenever I'm reading "Fabulous at Every Age," I find I'm always attracted to what the 30- and 40-year-olds are wearing. I think there are styles that cross over from one decade to the next. But I don't ever want to feel like something is just off. You have to have a little voice in your head that says, "Maybe not that dress" or "Maybe not that outfit."

TF: There are certain things your body starts to do at certain times, and in our society we think, "Oh, I need to hide that." Do you ever censor things like that?

RW: Well, I won't be wearing any of those Miley Cyrus crop tops, that's for sure.

TF: Let's just say, I don't think that Miley should be wearing those either.

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