Saturday, December 22, 2007

One Tamale, 2 tamales 3 tamales- MORE, 4 tamales, 5 tamales , 6 tamales- I CAN't eat no more..Today Padres organization came to 4th floor and cooked lunch for all of us. My love to tamales is sickening. I could eat them and eat them until I am ready to throw up. I can't say no to GOOD HOMEMADE TAMALES- this time they had 3 different types of tamales, El Salvadore'an, Mexican, and some other tamales with pinaple junks in it. IT WAS HEAVENLY. I had 5 of them. I just ate like I never seen food before. They also had some soup, that was very flavorful and had some kind of beans in it, but I was not sure what kinds. It was one of the best Spanish food lunches I have had for a long while. Thanks again to those who made it possible. :)

Sunday, October 28, 2007

GUESS WHAT , GUESS WHAT!!!!!!My sister is coming to visit me for 13 days.WOHOWHOOO. I know, I know, 13 days is short time, but at least she can come and help me out , while my DH makes us some money, so I can spend a whole day in the spa...;) She will land on 11th of November and fly back to Estonia on November 23rd.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Yah.. I am bjak.It has been pretty intense few weeks. Honestly, Life in Ronald McDonald house is pure rehab. No drinking, I need a drink...... I am not smoking, so what smoking is allowed. Should I start again?.. At least I will start saying no to macadamia nut cookies. ( I LOVE COOKIES).. Somebody bring me a bottle of TURI vodka , I really need it. DANG.. I need drinking buddies... AND I really need to get my fat ass to gym. I wanna go, but I really do not feel like it.. I want to loose weight, but what does it really matter, if I am going to gain it back afterwards??? hmh? I am not ready for LIFESTYLE change... blah blah blah... ALL I need is one LONG night in nightclub with girls, drinking Martinis and listening latest club beats... like Gimme me more...lollollol...More what?? Cookies??? cakes?? Spider cupcakes, candy corn?? gummy spiders?? YUCK.. sugar overload here..... ok, nuff that...

Also, I really need to see chiropractic.. My back , neck is sooo stiff and painful. And to top it off, my latest trend is to have nightly headaches... It is starting to get annoying... ( sorry, for complaining about my silly issues, when people are loosing their homes due to fire in ca).Air quality sucks, we are breathing in junks of dust... It still has not rained, WE are stuck here in LA due to Reginas LOW counts... And add more to the story, WE HAVE TO STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLE UNTIL REGINAS ANC IS AT LEAST 500.... Which will happen about in 5 days...

BUT I have to admit. I am so thankful to my good friend Julee, who did my hair. She did extraordinary job cutting and coloring. My hair never looked better. ;) Thanks JULEE...

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Anyway, today was one crappy happy day. It started out 8 am . After I dropped my car to get brakes fixed I was told that sensors has to be fixed, and this and that and overall your car is crap right now.... And I ended paying 780 dollars for brakes, oil changes, filter changes, more oil changes and some other stuff. Engine oil was kind of black so I thought - WTF, Lets just spend some money here. ANd air filter looked discusting - again my first thought was - WTF have I been breathing in the whole time. yuck....After 3 hours in some ecno or whatever I went to see my doctor because I have enlarged lymph nodes and I have been hysterically stressed about them ( of course my dh has no clue what to say). SO there I go to see my doctor. Sadly he was not in. There was someone else covering for him. Someone I do not like very much especially If I see that someone first time....She looks at me, touches my neck. asks me to blow my nose, checks my ears, tonsils, asks me to say AAAAAA and then checks something on his digital medical book- HMh. HEr response-DRY mouth is side effect of your Celexa - ( thank you very much, but I have been on it for a while and I have been doing greatm thank you very much again).HMH. OK. YOU have enlarged lymph nodes ( I think I told her that first place). There are 2 reasons why you have them. First- You most likely had some upper respiratory infection that has not cleared up, OR you had recent acne break out ( of course she was hinting to my big zit sitting on my for head).Honestly- I wanted to smack her and tell her- LOOK Lady, My lymph node is fuckin painful,and I feel like I need to drink up whole ocean... And you are telling me that my ZIT is causing my lymph node to grow that fast that painful..

BUT instead I asked- SO what to you recommend??? Try some zhitromax and if your lymph nodes are still swollen in 2 weeks come back and we are going to take a closer look. MY first panicy first thought was- OMG I WILL BE DEAD IN 2 weeks because you are curing my cancer with acne medication... But then I came to my senses and told myself.- Just calm down diana... She is just doctors assistand.. It is not her fault if I die before 2 weeks is up... .hahah.

Anyway, right now I am hoping that that lump goes away and I can live happily ever after and I do not have to come back from " other side" and haunt her .....

Then we had Ronald McDonald meeting. Kinds of like- How is RMDH helped you while your kids are seeking treatment. In general I like RMDH. It is close to hospital , great kids library, allrighty kitchen, lots of magazines to read, bed full of bed bugs and roaches... and few rats... ( outside, I seen them). AND i told them that I hate 24 hour rule, and I told them that they should change it... So I am hoping they are at least thinking about working out some kind of plan with hospital to monitor who is on treatment, those can stay away for longer and who is off treatment have to check in in 24( compromize).. But then Few spanish families started complaning about 4 family rule. They want AT LEAST 5 if not six, and they want to house visitors and so on... I wanted to stand up and tell her- LOOK LADies and Gentlemen- how is housing 6 people under those conditions is going to help your kid???? But I kept my mouth shut,,, I just YAAAWWWNNEEEDD... And end of meeting I got 20 dollar vons gift certificate- I made 20 dollars today. :) WOHOOOO.Right now I can not fall asleep because I got mild fever and I am trying to stay awake to see if it goes away ... AND I never had DZ, but after seeing what they have to offer , I dream about it...

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

I decided that I become an angel and NEVER even talk trash about other people... never ever everever ( YEAH, right, like that ever going to happen haha).But todays blog is about things I like( Most of you know that I love my family, so I am not going to talk about them). This post is entirely about products I love.

Since I love make up I have tried way to many different brands and there are still way to many to go.. But I absolutely love Sheer Cover BASE PERFECTOR.http://www.sheercover.com/I currently switched from Bare Minerals to Sheer Cover and I LOVE SHEER COVER SO MUCH MORE. Their products are much more gentle on skin and give awesome coverage. This is link with Bare Minerals. http://www.bareminerals.com/

I also loved Sheer Cover mascara - AWESOME PRODUCT. I love that it does not stain my lids and when I wash it , it comes off in clumps, instead of tinting my whole face black.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

what happened to My PMS. I do not have PMS at all. I feel peace. Nothing bugs me, ( besides my own stupid issues like fat ass and acne covered face).I look like I need a serious face lift and More I walk around In LA area, I do need bigger boobs and more fat in my belly area..... Just thought I let you know.....

I need something , but I am not sure what I need. I want to do things, but I can not start anything. I want people act NORMAL around me. I am so tired everybody being careful what they are saying or suggesting... Oh dang it... Life goes on no matter what is going on in our lives. If I can deal with it , so can you....

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

I think I am going through middle age crisis. ( Yes at age 29). I am not sure what I want or who I am. All I know is I want world peace and cure for cancer. Cure for cancer first and then world peace.. I think.OK. It has been very emotional almost couple of months for us. I still can not believe that Regina relapsed. I look at her and It just does not sound right. She looks great, she acts great, she is smarter and sharper than before, she still does not like to read much and Math is her fave subject. She LOVES high school musical and Hanna Montana and Suite life with Zack and cody. SHE loves dancing and singing. SHE LOVES playing with barbies and Bratz ( I HATE BRATZ, but for her I have to love them). I just got her new Bratz dvd Bratz kids sleepover ,( I think). NOW she is requesting me to redecorate her room in Hannah montana style... HUH??? I ask.... HANNAH MONTANA.. what the heck happened to princesses - She tells me- Mommy, I still love princesses, but it is time for change.. WHAT HAPPENED TO MY REGINA??? SHE IS GROWING UP. H E L P. Next thing I know she will be asking belly ring and mohawk ( spelling). ANd before I can turn around she comes home and tells me she is wants to run away.. because I suck as a mother..... To I think to much ahead??? But that is all I can do right now.. THINK and guess and speculate ... Oh, I hate my life. I truly do. Seriosly- Why can't I be 6 foot brazilian victoria Secret beauty with flawless skin and beautiful long legs??? Again- That is not much to ask... I know In my past life I was british street musician ... Now I am suffering mom.. Next life there better be something good for me or I will scream...

Oh.. I just emailed my friend Kathy about my tonight coctail... Do not laugh. I have not had a drink for a while because drinking is big NO NO in CHLA( childrens hospital of Los Angeles) so here is drink for Today-- 1 scoop of slim fast powder, 2 oz of wodka, 7 oz of cranberry juice 4-5 pieces of frozen pinapple . BLENDER- ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ until it all looks nice and foamy and them VOILAA. Slimming and energizing drink all at once:) Trust me, It tastes DELISIOSO...

OK. Now I am going to sleep because tomorrow is another day.

AND ALL OF YOU. GO visit LA. Check out West coast estonian days. IT IS HUGE festival that celebrates estonian arts . It will be fun..... Check out this link .

Friday, July 20, 2007

I am truly sorry that I have left this blog kind of hanging...Truth is- I can't find anything negative to say at this moment. I could talk about how cancer sucks and how , sleeping in hospital bed night after night sucks.What I can say is.. I will be back after I inhale some negativity from somewhere and I'll be back..Well, I should have something Negative to say actually. Reginas story was published in one Estonian Newspaper ( well, it is US kind of newspaper, full of gossip and daily Estonian news) It also has online Version. For me it was little bit strange to read comments where people commented things like- Gabriel Austin got his name because Mom and Dad had sex in backseat of Austin Martin???? Or.. Perverts- they radiated their daughter, or the best comment of all- what a Stupid brainless housewife I am. Most likely after my 15 minutes of fame....

Comments like that just make me roll my eyes... roll roll roll roll roll roll roll roll....But I was also surprised by all the great caring comments. :) Thank you . I did not contact newspaper . They contacted me, and I just wanted share Reginas story, because I feel that she is incredible fighter and strong spirit. Yes, she is INCREDIBLY spoiled, but why not spoil her to pieces... We even feed her lol.. Just regina... lol She is true Princess here.... ;)

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

I am sorry, dear friends that I have left this very important blog kind of hanging ....The truth is, I have lots to write about, but since C A N C E R is very touchy subject, I will not touch it... All I can say.. cancer sucks. PEDIATRIC cancer sucks. What would you do if doctors tell you- your daughter/son has only about 2 months to live? ANd they pretty much tell you to give up hope... There is nothing much you can do??? Would you give up because you want to listen to doctors??

NO NO NO.. If there was rehab for losers , somebody would make huge amounts of money by now...

We are not giving up. We are doing EVERYTHING we can Before we give up. And I hope we never have to give up. We found doctor in CHLA who is filling to but Regina on high ( very intensive chemo). If tumors start shrinking, she will be hit with even higher doses of chemo than first round. Downside is-- chemo might be too strong for her and she may pass away during her treatments... But if tumors start shrinking then WOHOOOOOOOOHOOOOHOOOOO. But if we do not try- will we ever find out... so why not!!! We have to try .Also, We have started her on some very expensive Chinese natural meds ( mushroom) , It is about 60 year old mushroom and Lb pricee is 600 dollars. It should be enought tea for 13 weeks.. Hopefully it also helps...

And yesterday I was introduced to hyperbaric oxygen therapy. That benefit her while her immune system has failed... You know, there is so much out here , and I am learning more and more every day. As stupid it sounds, I am amazed what we can do with natural medications to our daughter, but again. We have to combine it with contemporary meds for maximum effects.

Then on thursday Regina will meed traditional Chinese medicine doctor and she will make personalized plan for her. :) Very very cool!!!

Saturday, June 23, 2007

REgina is fighting hard for her life right now. Her tiny smart brain is filled with multiple tiny tumors that grow minute by minute. I was told that we are leaving hospital and take her home next week to make her last few months as comfortable as possible . I was told that chemo will not work this time even thought some oncologists may recommend it. I wrote little more in my Life as it is blog http://www.diana78.blogspot.com

Friday, June 15, 2007

I just finished filling out my resume online. YES, I am job hunting. It is about time. lol I am 29 and done being stay at home administrative assistant/mom/cleaning lady/chef/carpenter- It is time to update my resume.... Now, just keep everything crossed because I have been rejected way to many times- Bed, bath and beyond, Barnes and Noble, Linen's Things, Maycis.

Monday, June 04, 2007

new gyn- I like her.., pap smear, breast exam, pelvic exam, low but health blood pressure, prescription for anti depressants - celexa,, but I got generic brand and got it for free. It is weird... I took my first pill, and all i did was yawn all day long, kind of like I want to throw up , but instead I am going to yawn... haha... Doctro told me not do drink any alcoholic beverages at first, so I know what are side effects.... lol Bummer, and I was hoping to open bottle of whiskey and finish it up.....Yawwwwnnnnn.

ALSO, leila, my good friend Leila thinks I am fat. She does.. How sad is this.. Today she sent me email with Allure Total Makeover ... With this, and slim fast and Celexa , and vegetables I'll be able to drop 10 lbs in 6 weeks... At least I am hoping so....http://www.allure.com/user/makeover/login

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Blend it in a blender.... Oh so refreshing.. SO delicious :):) I'm in a blended , pureed food kick right now. Organic of course.. I even baked 90 % organic cookies. lol...Few days ago I did clense/detox round, AND OMG. I am FULL on toxins. Headaches, blemishes, more headaches and MOre blemishes, and OF course I have to pick them until they get infected... Oh darn, I have to tie my hands behind my back , so I can stop squeezing...

Now more interesting topic for your ears. My question to you is- DO YOU LIKE YOUR OB/GYN?? Mine decided to become stay at home mom ( she was mine OB for 5 years), and now, tomorrow, I am going to see other GYN in same office. THey have about 10 gynecologist there , so it is hard to choose, but I went with my gut feeling... Anyway, I HATE changing doctors as personal as GYNs. lol Do you know that GYN's will remember your vagina instead of your face... So if you see your GYN second time and she did not recognize you , but then , when you lie there, your privates exposed to this world to see , you hear that" OH, NOW I REMEMBER... haha... do not fall out of your chair.. Just accept the fact that GYNs will remember your privates, dentists will remember you by your teeth, and your oncologist will recognize you by studding your brain scans.... ;)

Saturday, June 02, 2007

yes, it is that time again... OMG. I can not take my PMS. I absolutely hate it. Mood swings, body breakouts, dizzy spells, "blond"moments.. And weirdest one of them all-- my reactions slow down. I AVOID driving during PMS, because I can't spread my attention , and I get horrible anxiety attacks, and I get those weird hungry spells, but I can not keep my food down.. YUCK..BUT what is strange about my PMS period , is that I get this kind of feelings every other month. Right now I cant keep my food down, BUT next month, I will eat everything onsite... EVERYTHING. So Now I rather deal with acne than gain weight...lol

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Today I was kind of bored and decided to find entertainment by getting more info about FATS. Now I know why my cholesterol is fine. I just use foods that are low of all bad fats. I really did not read labels that much- I just checked cal content and general fat content, but if it had trans fats or saturated fats or other fats,, I just did not... I have been eating Healthy all along, BUT just giant amounts. My foods are 98% trans fat free. Which is good, since trans fat, like saturated fat and dietary cholesterol, raises the LDL cholesterol that increases your risk for CHD.(coronary heart disease). STAY AWAY FROM MARGARINE......

Following is copied from FDA website.. Very informative...

Here are some practical tips you can use every day to keep your consumption of saturated fat, trans fat, and cholesterol low while consuming a nutritionally adequate diet.

Check the Nutrition Facts panel to compare foods because the serving sizes are generally consistent in similar types of foods. Choose foods lower in saturated fat, trans fat, and cholesterol. For saturated fat and cholesterol, keep in mind that 5 percent of the Daily Value (%DV) or less is low and 20 percent or more is high. (There is no %DV for trans fat.)

Choose alternative fats. Replace saturated and trans fats in your diet with monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats. These fats do not raise LDL cholesterol levels and have health benefits when eaten in moderation. Sources of monounsaturated fats include olive and canola oils.Sources of polyunsaturated fats include soybean oil, corn oil, sunflower oil and foods like nuts.

Choose vegetable oils (except coconut and palm kernel oils) and soft margarines (liquid, tub, or spray) more often because the combined amount of saturated fat and trans fat is lower than the amount in solid shortenings, hard margarines, and animal fats, including butter.

Consider fish. Most fish are lower in saturated fat than meat. Some fish, such as mackerel, sardines, and salmon, contain omega-3 fatty acids, which are being studied to determine if they offer protection against heart disease.

Choose lean meats, such as poultry without the skin and not fried and lean beef and pork, not fried, with visible fat trimmed.

Ask before you order when eating out. A good tip to remember is to ask which fats are being used in the preparation of your food when eating or ordering out.

Limit foods high in cholesterol such as liver and other organ meats, egg yolks, and full-fat dairy products, like whole milk.

Now, I love food ( you know it), and I can eat. I have eaten to a point that I threw up and then continued eating ( just some kind of chemical imbalance in my brain was shut off, and I did not get fullness sensation ..but that is long story... and happened while ago...

I can still eat to a point to a throwing up, BUT I have learned to recognize signs of fullness ( which is ONE OF THE HARDEST things to do). BUT my issue is, I still overeat and I do not feel full. I can consume about 6000 -7000 cals in one sitting and still eat, eat eat.. VERY frustrating... but anyway...I am happy to let you know that I am on track again. I started loosing this week. I started slim fast plan, and it keeps my full . What I do to make it more appealing.I take 1/2 cup frozen organic raspberries, 1/2cup water, 1/2 cup carrot juice , littlebit of ice, i tablespoon of extra fiber, and I blend it. OH SO JUMMY. Sometimes I use fresh bananas, fresh strawberries, carrots, apples, or mix all of them, and OMG. It is best meal ever. ALl nutrients I need in one cup. :) YUMMMMMMM...

Hopefully, ( if I do not fall off the track) I will be in my "yellow polka dot bikini " in 3 weeks ;)

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

I'm such a dumbasssss. I really am. You know. I have not smoked since February. I DID REALLY GOOD, but then i got this giant urge to smoke. Not sure why, but probably because I am slowly getting ready for our July Mempis trip. Smoking in Mempis is a M U S T ... Gaining weight in Memphis Is a double must...

SO natural flow of things is- stop smoking -> gain weight-> start smoking-> gain more weight -> stop smoking AND NEVER START AGAIN.I smoked 4 cigs in 2 days, and I got so sick I threw up. It was bad, really bad,,, and I just GOT My complexion under control, I was clean and clear, and because of those 4 stinky butts , my face and chest are covered with ugly white heads. SICK. sick, sick..

But yeah.. I am at this point right now. I can't stop eating. It is horrible, and now , that I am getting older ( DON"T LAUGH), it is so much harder for me to loose weight. Couple of years ago, I gained, I lost, I gained I lost . No big deal, but now, I am not sure what to do do boost my metabolism. I have been eating healthy foods, 90 % foods are organic, not processed. And there is that 10% that is still processed... Like ketchup, and other canned things I have to use once in a while... But I CAN't Loose what I am eating in. It stuck like glue in my middle section. IT IS NOT LEAVING ME. I hate it, I truly do. And part of this weight gain is due to my not smoking part. BUT I can't start again. I can't. It is just wrong. :( I rather gain few pounds and complain about it, but NO MORE SMOKING.Shame on me for doing those 4 cigs. Bad Diana, No cookie for you tonight, just peanut brownie.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Lets talk about cuisine. I am hungry. I have been dieting for couple of days, since my size 13 pants ( largest I have been in 4 years), did not want to fit me anymore. :(:(:(I am big Russian food lover. Just simplicity of foods and flavor. Nothing to overpowering. ( Kind of like Estonian, ;) ). I was just watching Extra , and they were talking about this amazing new restaurant in LA. It is called Romanov, and it serves "international" food with contemporary kick. ... I add this place to my "To do" list. :) Who wants to go there with me ????http://www.romanovla.com/

I am also big Mexican food lover. Now, I am not taco or burrito person - BUT HOME MADE Tamales, and REAL, Enchiladas - OMG. YOu got to be kidding me.. That is my kind of comfort food...

I love food, and I'd be lying to you if I tell you that Dieting is easy. :( Now, that I have not smoked a sig for over 4 months ( I think), food tastes so much better, aroma, flavor, more aroma.... Oh, ..( can you tell, I am hungry , as I am typing this???, I just opened bottle of red wine, and I am so fucking screwed , because I cant enjoy food with it. ( I thought if one of my Best friends can do it, I can do it,,, NO eating after 6 PM ; ) ),.... It sucks not to EAT, what I want to eat, when I want to eat......... BAAAAAA

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Is it me , or is it me..Past few days I have been checking out Estonian Real Estate. I just want to know what is available and what is price range. You know what sucks. Prices are pretty good- with 3-4 million estonian crons(about 300 000 dollars , I can have pretty good 300 sq/ft house, with GIANT back/front yard. But drawback is, most of houses are NMS. I am picky. Very picky. I am just not very happy with layouts, material choices, heating/cooling systems. etc. IF I ever move back and Decide to buy house in ESTONIA. I end up spending extra 200 000 dollars to just make house fit my standards..

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Estonia is situated in Northern Europe, on the coast of the Baltic Sea, neighbouring Finland, Sweden, Latvia and Russia. It is a country with 1.4 million people, which attracts more than 3 million visitors annually.Dates from Estonian history ( from MOFA website- Ministry Of Foreign Affairs)02 May 2005

In the area that now forms present-day Estonia, the first settlements occurred some 11,000 years ago, after the ice cap retreated.

13th century, first half. During the 12th century the Baltic region had been in the hands of the Teutonic Knights. Estonia was incorporated into Christendom at the beginning of the 13th century, under the pressure of crusaders from Germany and Denmark.

14th century. In the Baltic region, power was now in the hands of the Hanseatic League. Several Estonian towns and cities belonged to the League, including Tallinn (Reval), which had received its city charter as early as 1248.

16th century, first half. The Reformation reaches Estonia, which from then on remained a part of the Lutheran cultural space.

16th century, second half - 17th century. From 1558 onwards, Estonia became the battleground for a war involving Denmark, Sweden, Russia and Poland. Sweden came out as winner, and Estonia remained under her sphere of influence until the beginning of the 18th century. During Swedish rule, the first university in Estonia was founded at Tartu in 1632.

18th century. The Great Northern War left Estonia under Russian rule (1721). Estonia became a window through which Peter the Great wished to gain access to Europe.

19th century. The winds of numerous national movements blow through the whole of Europe. In Estonia, the period of national awakening commences. In 1862, a national epic "Kalevipoeg" was published. A high point of the Estonian national movement was the first nation-wide Song Festivalorganised by Johann Voldemar Jannsen and the “Vanemuine” society in Tartu in June 1869.

1918. On the 24th of February the Estonian Republic was proclaimed. At first this was merely a decision made on paper. True independence was fought for over the period 1918 to 1920, during the War of Liberation. The struggle was crowned with success, and a treaty was finally signed with Soviet Russia, which revoked in perpetuity all claims over Estonia.

1918-1939. This was the period of the first sovereign republic. During independence, Estonia established diplomatic relations and made its existence felt throughout Europe. Independence was curtailed by the signing of the Pact between Nazi Germany and the Soviet Union in 1939.

1940-1991. Following the Soviet occupation in 1940, Estonia was occupied by Nazi Germany from 1941 until 1944. The Soviet Union incorporates Estonia in the fall of 1944. A large proportion of the population fled abroad. Many others were arrested and deported to Siberia. Those who remained, had to adjust to a new way of life.

The end of the 20th century. Estonia succeeded in regaining independence by way of the Singing Revolution of 1988. She has been fully independent once more since 1991.

2004.Estonia became a NATO member state on 29 March 2004 and a European Union member state on 1 May 2004.

Friday, May 18, 2007

In a short note- I am not liking me right now. I am not liking new me. I have lost motivation to do things or please others. I do not like even pleasing myself. I strongly dislike may. ANd aI have hated May with passion past 3 years. May 8 - my birthday- Regina was seriously ill, and I was too tough on her. May 26th , 2004, me flying to Estonia, Reginas condition was getting worse, we still had no idea what was going on. May 27, I was flying back to US, Because I was asked to . May 29th I found out that Regina had brain surgery to remove Brain tumor... I Still blame myself for not being there for her every step on the way. I HATE THAT I DID NOT LISTEN TO MY INNER SELF .... I CAN'T STAND FEELING LIKE THIS EVERY YEAR, EVERY MAY... IT IS OVER NOW, what am I afraid off?? I know I cant turn back time and change things around, but it bothers me.... I can't let go... I just cant... It is getting frustrating...

Sunday, May 13, 2007

If you have not seen Spiderman 3, go see it. Fun movie.and Also, DISTURBIA. I went to see this movie with no high expectations, but I was pleasantly surprised how well acted, directed and written this movie was. Full of suspense,. Keeps you interested the whole time :)

..or what's left of it :)We had great mothers day. My dh. is full of surprises. On mothers day morning he told us to dress up because he was going to take us somewhere special :) So after fixing us up, we ran into our car and headed somewhere... And that somewhere was in Balboa Island . Restaurant- Oceanfront 21, where we had very expensive mothers day brunch. FOOD WAS AWESOME!!!! Even kids ate it. lol not to mention- gabriel discovered that crab legs are pretty tasty and dark chocolate cake tasted like it was infused with coffee.. lol he is something else. After our Long and very tasty dinner we headed to fashion island and took a walk, ate ice cream and then went back home, because all that food made us just very sleepy... ;) PLUS I was in some serious root canal pain... that had taken over my whole mouth....

Now... it is 9.03.. kids are in bed, Nick just left to airport and I am here, typing,and watching Desperate housewives.Kids and Nick did such an awesome job to make my mothers day special. Flowers, cards, helping around house, cleaning up kids toys. etc. days like this just make me smile ....

Also, on Friday night we attended our friends wedding. Very cute wedding. It was in Newport beach on a Yacht called Icon. It was sunset wedding and lasted 3 hours. From 6pm-till10pm . Bride was beautiful, groom was handsome, BUT I had huge problem with what was going on on boat. I was checking out price list for food, and dj, and boat and planners etc. And I was not impressed with it. Food sucked. Stake was overcooked and bitter, time to meet and mingle to short , captain who married Beautiful couple was not belivable. If it was me, I would have complained my ass off, but since it was not my wedding I just smiled and acted all cute :) Congrats to Newlyweds :)

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Happy belated birthday to me. JWe had awesome day. On may 8th, I skipped school and did something extreme .Few of you know that ocean is one of my biggest fears. I am scared of that big old thing.. Since I am so afraid of it, I decided to do something about it. I booked Captain Dave dolphin safari trip ( dolphin watching) and on Tuesday morning we all headed to Dana point to do this. I was nervous. I was sweating nervous, but I did it. And I am so glad I did. We drove about 8 miles out to ocean and OMG. IT WAS SO BEAUTIUFL. Ocean was quiet , It was so peaceful and beautiful I wanted to cry. And FINALLY we saw them . About 3000 yes , three thousand dolphins. That is not exact number, but close enough. Our captain told us that they have not seen such a sight for couple of years. OMG, dolphins, sea lions , fish , birds… Dolphins trying to play with our boat , trying to race us… It was breathtaking.Regina and Gabriel also loved it J

Then , around 3.30 we got home, dressed up and headed to long beach. I watch our local PBS station and once in a while I support them. This time around I HAD to support them. In march I purchased tickets through their fundrising event to see Celtic Woman. They are incredible. Voices- so pure, so clean. These day, it is hard to find this kind of voice quality. If you have not heard of them, google Celtic Woman, or listen to their music in I tunes.CONCERT WAS FABULOS. I cryed, I did. I had to. IT is not that often I got to see my fave artists live on stage, and seeing them perform live was life changing experience. Very inspirational and uplifting. J

So that was my day..

OH, THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU FOR KIND BIRTHDAY WISHES. YOU ALL MEAN A WORLD TO ME, AND I AM SORRY , IF I SOMETIMES WRITE ABOUT THINGS MAKE YOU UPSET, BUT THAT IS ME. I DO NOT HOLD BACK… LIFE IS TO SHORT TO HIDE UNDER COVERS…. ;0)..Hope to see you soon guys. J

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Photography by Kiino.

We had such a wonderful day. Our day started with plumber showing up in our house… and fixed MAJOR plumbing problem- water pressure was triple what it was supposed to be, and we had water squirting out from faucets … after that very expensive error was fixed , we started 56 mile trip to LA.

Estonian house was converted into one huge studio with make up artist, hair stylist and photographer. Event was called house Beautiful and it was fundraiser to help raise funds towards fixing up Estonian house. We only stayed for a short while, since my dh was bored… men…

BTW dear Estonians- FOOD WAS AwesOME!!!!!BTW, pics taken ( the ones that look professional , are taken by Kiino Villand.http://www.kiinovilland.com/he did awesome job. J

Then we headed to downtown LA. We went to see MOCA. ( Museum of Contemporary Art). http://www.moca.org/index.php check out this website, it has some of exhibits pics.I LOVED it. I wish it was only me, so I had more time to look around… But since we were with kids, we had to hurry through and hit the road…

On our way home we stopped at Huntington beach and had nice early dinner . Weather was very windy, and wind was strong enough to carry us away, so we just took a short walk, and headed home .

It was very busy , but very fulfilling day. JTomorrow, Sunday… we are heading to Torrance, where Rides For Kids takes place…..

To those who have no idea what I am talking about- I hosted a From Europe to Asia party. I filled room with tables and chairs, ( to resemble busy Chinese restaurant) , got food tea, snacks an Hot Pot party was ready to start. We also played few games, had quizzes, etc. It was tons of funJ