Sunday, January 22, 2012

The Importance of Spirituality

A strangely eerie but quite joyful event happened at my sister Rhonda and brother-in-law Peter's house on Christmas day. I was taking pictures of my family, I took seventeen pictures in all. They were the usual kind of photos anyone would take on such an occasion.

When I viewed the photos there was one particular photograph that stood out. It was a picture of my sister, Delpha, in the background and of my neice, Erica, and her new baby, Matthew along with the back of my great neice, Emily's head in a Santa hat, in the foreground.

For some unknown reason it was the only picture of the seventeen taken that was out of focus. When I saw the image I was immediately struck by the fact it looked like a picture of my Mother.

This photograph, although out of focus, looked as if my Mother was sitting on the couch in the living room! I showed this photo to Bill and even though he had never met my Mother, he has seen pictures of her in my home, without any prompting from me he said to me this looks like your Mother.

A discussion about the photograph ensued and he began to scrutinize the photo more closely. If you look carefully there is an aura about her head in the photo. After Bill left my house he did some research about this type of photograpic phonomena and his research devulged that often times when our deceased relatives pay us a visit it is often around happy family events(like Christmas) or when a new member enters the family (my new great nephew).

Before he mentioned those facts I had never really considered that this was my great nephew's first Christmas. Of course anyone who knew my Mother would know that Chrsitmas was by far her favorite holiday.

Some readers may wonder what does any of this have to do with the fact that this blog is primarily about losing your legs?

I believe when you have dealt with, or are confronted with monumental catastrophic life changing events like my leg loss, your belief in a higher spiritual being will be of great comfort to you during these and the subsequent events in your life that folow.

If I did not have my belief in a Higher Source, a Devine Being, God, a source of unseen guidance, my life would be greatly diminished. I pray often for guidance and strength to get me through the leg loss ordeal I have been thrust into.

I'm sure I have mentioned before that I talk to both of my deceased parents all the time, asking for help and strength. It was no surprise to me that my Mother came to visit her family, meet her new great grandson and participate, although unseen, in our Christmas.

Upon closer analysis of the whole photographic phonomena I wondered why my Mother had chosen Delpha as her vehicle to show herself in that photo. Why wouldn't she choose Delpha? Delpha was the only child of her four children who was with her when she left this world and Delpha is her youngest child.

There are many naysayers in this world, people who would like to think I am silly for thinking such things as I have just written. Be that as it may, I believe it was my Mother, a realization that has brought me joy and comfort. My belief in an afterlife had sustained me in this life, given me reason to carry on, live a life of dignity, grace and perseverance. You can't really argue with a belief that has helped and continues to help you live a better more fulfilling life.

I get goosebumps everytime I look at the photo, goosebumps because I know she was and is here now as I write this.

It looks like my Mother gave me the greatest Christmas gift of all, herself...

1 comment:

This reminds me of something that happened back in August, the day of Erica's baby shower:

Rhonda, Erica, and I were out on the terrace chatting. It was a nice, sunny day. Two Boston ferns--the only plant life within 20 feet of us--swayed in the breeze as Erica & I cracked up over something hilarious Rhonda had said. All of a sudden, a hummingbird appears.

That's strange, I thought, Rhonda doesn't have a feeder out. Nor or there any flowers nearby.

So the hummingbird hovered, wings ablur, a good 10 seconds, right before our eyes--literally.

"Ooh a hummingbird!" said Erica.

Then the bird turned his head side to side, as if looking each of us in the eyes, before darting off.

Rhonda said, half-jokingly, "I bet that was Dad... he wanted to say 'hi'!"

I laughed. Then I thought a moment: Dad adored birds. If he could inhabit an animal's body for one minute, just to say 'hi' to his daughters & granddaughter & soon-to-be-born great-grandson, he'd surely choose a bird of some kind--would he not?

About Me

I am a 56 year old gay man. I am a bilateral above knee amputee. I lost my right leg in July 2008 and recently lost my left leg in Dec. 2010. I lost my legs as a result of hypercoagulation syndrome.(My blood is inherently too thick and consequently clots too easily.)I have created this blog as a suggestion from my nephew. I will be writing a book about my experiences in the future.I having writing this blog since February 2011,I have enjoyed sharing my thoughts and feelings about my limb loss and hope my words have found a place in your heart.