From here, there and everywhere

:P

An urgent meeting was called by the HOD today in his office in which the whole CS&E department was present. People just sat wherever they found space. After all its not so easy to fit in 40 people in a small room. N and H were sitting on the two opposite/extreme ends of the room. I was sitting right beside H.

It really does n’t matter that I agree or not, It is just the fact that you write about such things every other day! Ok men are sexist pig and women are blabbering monkeys, can we as a species get over it and move on?!

The thing is, both men and women have their places in the society, There are things that men can do better and their are things that women can do better and some thing that the other sex does but they can’t. Point being men won’t be men without women and just by existing women make men whatever they are, and vice versa. The one is irrelevant in any frame of reference without the other.

So feminism and male Chauvanism are just extremes of the same spectrum, and like I ‘ve said a million times, any extreme is bad. equillibrium my friend, that is the way.

Now about the incident. if N had n’t said anything to an already lousy comment she would n’t have stooped to H’s level and would have kept her grace as well as that of women. It may have been a slam dunk, point going to N but the only thing she did prove is that if men are pigs, women are nuts as well and she definitely lacks the maturity a woman of her stature should have had.

I m sorry, I should have just ignored this in the first place. Grow up and get a life.

The thing is we keep revolving around petty issues and differences, that person is black, or yellow or red, hell blue and friggin purple for that matter. Or its women are this and men are that, Or its this person belongs to this or that…

Can we stop treading over this damned social minefield?! ‘Battle of the sex’ I hate that word, do women and men actually have to be on opposite sides? If so that is pathetic and we as a species have failed, cuz as far as I can tel, cats and dog live in harmony and there are n’t much sides.

If we are the better generation we should at least set an example, stick it to the elders that we have at least become harmonous with just being human rather that men and women. Otherwise we are no better and humankind deserves to be extinct which is where we are headed to. Its is no longer a fight for women or men or Muslims, Cristians or jews, or whites or blacks or damned friggin purples and tangerines. It has become a fight for our humanity.

And these petty issue have brought us to this brink. where we are at war with our own selves. Man I hate being human if this is what we are, would have been better of as an animal, At least then I would have had an excuse to be one.

mera sawal hai.
ya aurtoon ka roona dhoona kiyun chalta rehta hai hamesha..
They want to be seen equal to men but still they want men to leave seats for them. If a woman becomes a manager of a man majority department , she says it was very hard and its hard to manage men. If man becomes the boss of a woman majority deparment women say its a male favourable company now lets all get him on sexual harrasment…

I dont understand this, if you are equal to man then just stop whinning and wear real pants…

@ Safi
do i really talk about this a lot? I have just had one post on this earlier. Now if you do remember my last post on this (and the only other post on this topic)…i said not all men are MCPs and it was pretty much in favor of men. I personally have no grudges against all men. i just dont like it wen educated men make such comments..esp wen they are not needed.
As for H answering the way she did, i think its sometimes important to do that. you just cant stay quiet all the time. There’s a limit to everything and everyone should understand that.

@ farooq
oops am sorry. i got a lil confused i think 😉

@ SAWJ
but its more about forgetfulness and the inclination towards gossiping rather than being naqis-ul-aqal. i and farooq had a detailed discussion on this a while back

@ Saad
H is a woman and not a man and that too a happily married one. She just wont take any crap from anyone.

@ Ash
Now this wasnt about sexual harrasment. Now the equality you are talking about, I dont believe in that. I believe in something which what the Quran teaches us and what Safi has pointed out earlier. Men and women are equal but different. The sort of equality you are talking about is advocated by the westerns and its something which has not only destroyed their society, its now destroying ours too.

To me, the entire “Men vs. Women” thing will always be a comic genre to enjoy with female friends, nothing more. Well, of course, sometimes you get to see men and women squirm on this topic (like saffi right now :P) which is funny in itself 😛

Hey, this was n’t an assault on either your ideas or deliefs (and especially not you!) and though it may have very much sounded like one.

And I know for a fact that I ain’t educated… that almost eighteen years of education down the tube…

Just to clarify, I know that you know that all men ain’t pigs, But you do talk about it more (I think). And you should…. voicing for the oppressed is well… a very mnoble thing to do.

And again to clarify, I did n’t write those comments as a man…. I wrote them just as a human being, But like I said, Lets not dwell over petty issues. Most of our problems are solved if we thought things through as human beings rather than a very very small subset of the species.

As for H and N, I still stand by my opinion, just as there was a limit to bottling up his misogynistic behavior, there was a limit to N’s grace. The one thing I always thought women had better than men was patience and grace… My grandmother is a very successful doctor with her own practice, and she has dealt her share of male chauvanism amongst other things. While just I was there to pick her up one day I saw her dealing with a similar problem and my I was simply overwhelmed by her patience and her grace when I on the other hand wanted to kick the guys teeth in, which I would have done if she had n’t controlled me. (I have a very bad temper, SAWJ if you comment on this, I ll kill you)…

She could easily have thrown the guy out or called the police or get him beat up amongst other things, But compared to him she acted like an angel. When she had put all the fires out, I asked her why did n’t she do any of the above things and she simply said that is not the way of our prophet to stoop the the level of a for the lack of a better word ‘jahil’ man.

@ Absar
well i think a lot of the times it does get a lil serious. i wouldnt mind if a friend of mine would make a similar comment for me but i wouldnt like it if it is done in front of 40 people. i might not actually be able to do something like H cuz i usually find it difficult. the comment was actually targeted at H and he just made the comment seem generic.

@ Safi
i didnt take it personal…no harm done 🙂
as for your grandmom, trust me most women of today dont have the same patience as women of yesteryear. Sadly, in this so-called women’s liberation movement, women have actually been the real losers.
And I would really love to see SAWJ’s comment on your bad temper 😉

About the serious part, well my opinions won’t change many viewpoints, and waise bhi, I don’t think talking about this will change anything at all. Because the people who hold these prejudices aren’t the kind who’d listen to logic anyway 🙂 But what I do is not think about prejudice. Personally, I hate feminists because they’re always deflating their lungs on equality. And frankly, it’s not about equality. No two men are equals, how can we consider an entire species as being equal? There are a few ounces here and there that need to be considered.

I mean, a womans testimony will always be half that of a mans, but a mother is always three times more respected than a father. On the Day of Judgement, we will all be called not by the names of our fathers, but by the names of our mothers.

What I can do is offer not equality, but respect, regard and recognition.

Ok Absar…. I ll Have it your way… Won’t get serious ever again! Ok at least till I get squirming which will be pretty soon given the track record.

And SAWJ: If you so much as gave a hint I won’t go to any damn meeting with you!

That said. I have to agree with Absar, but equality would at least come where you are comparing oranges to oranges not apples. One can’t compare cuz kw rightfully put it, each gender is built for a different purpose. equality may be impossible but equity can be maintained.