[ ~ Fall 2009 ~ ]People mourned at the cemetery as they watched the men lower her coffin down the newly dug grave. They sympathized for her family but they mostly felt sorry for him, her husband. Everyone knew how much he loved her. They knew how much he treasured and cared for her. A girl watched everything from afar. She has a curly orange-ish brown hair that dropped down just an inch from her shoulder. She wore a black knee cut dress and a black Sarah Pacini scarf around her neck. Black shades covered her puffed eyes. She wanted to go closer, but she’s afraid to see him. After everyone had left, the husband and the girl from afar were the only ones that remained. She walked closer to where he was and she stopped just three feet away from him. “Jaejoong-ssi” she said softly. He raised his head up and he slowly turned his body around towards her direction. She took off her shades and folded them back inside her purse. Once Jaejoong saw her face a slight smile formed at the corner of his face. “Hyojoo-ssi” It’s been a while since they last saw each other. Ever since he moved to Seoul four years ago after he got married, they never even met once.“How are you coping?” she asked him worriedly. Jaejoong shrugged an ‘ok’ at her. “Jae,” her face turned into a concerned expression. “If you ever need a shoulder to cry on, don’t hesitate to come to me. I’m always here for you, ok?” she reassured him with a smile.“Thanks” he felt his heart ease a little bit knowing that his friend was here.For the rest of the afternoon, the two of them remained at the cemetery together just staring at the gravestone. Although she didn’t comfort him with words, they both knew their presence was enough to console each other. They’ve always been liked that. Ever since they were young they’ve always had their own special way to solace each other. [ ~ Winter 2009 ~ ]Two months have passed since her death. Hyojoo decided to stay at Seoul a little longer, although she hadn’t planned to, because she was worried about Jaejoong’s health. Ever since her death he hasn’t been himself lately. He has been locking himself at home all day long and he has been starving himself. If she doesn’t bring him food to eat, he won’t bother to cook or eat by himself.It was a cold and snowy evening when Hyojoo came to bring Jaejoong’s dinner. She knocked lightly on his apartment door and waited patiently for him to answer the door. But there was no answer. She knocked again, and still no answer. After her third try, she just grabbed the key hidden under the flower pot and used it to open the door herself. When she got inside all sorts of stuff blocked the way; his clothes, his food, and his wife’s picture were all on the floor. She picked up the picture and dusts the dirt off with her thumb. She stared at the picture for a moment, just admiring the beautiful face of his wife. She then placed it down on the counter on her left. As she slowly navigates her way inside, she calls out Jaejoong’s name. She waited for a response, but no one responded. She called his name again, but still no response. She searched his apartment from top to bottom, but he was nowhere in sight. ‘Did he go out?’ she thought. ‘But it’s snowing outside. Why would he-’ She began to panic. He’s gone and it’s freezing cold outside. What if something happens to him? What if he gets hurt? With his current state of mind, he might get into a serious accident. She immediately rushed out door and out of the apartment. She looked around the neighborhood and asked people who passed by if they saw a tall man with dark brown hair wandering around the streets, but no one recognized him. With all sorts of thoughts in mind, she felt like the world was spinning all around her. She won’t be able to forgive herself if something terrible happens to him. She can’t bear to lose him, not this time around. This time she was determined to get him back. She continued to roam the freezing cold streets of Seoul searching everywhere for him. She checked every place that she can think of, but he wasn’t anywhere there. Then she remembered the cemetery. Could he possibly be there? Of course he will.She ran as fast as she could towards the cemetery not caring at all about her frozen and aching legs. She ran up the snow covered ground with haste and anxiety. When she finally arrived at her grave, she found no one there. She let out a huge sigh of disappointment. Where could he possibly be at this hour?When she was about to make her way back, she heard a sound of falling nearby. She turned around but there was no one there. Then she heard someone sniffling behind the tall bushes. She slowly made her way around it. Behind the bushes she found a man slumped down on the cold wet ground, his head hanging low and his body covered with snow. As she got closer to him, she slowly recognized who it was.“JAEJOONG!” She ran towards him to see if he was alright. When he looked up, his face was stained with tears. She gasped upon the seeing his face. “Jaejoong” she said softly. He looked up at her and stared at her. As she stared back at him she can see sorrow and fear.“Hyojoo…….I’m scared.” His lips trembled as he spoke. “I-I don’t know what to do. Maki’s gone and I’m all alone.” He clutched the sleeves of her shirt tightly, pleading and not wanting to let go. She watched him falter right in front of her. She was somewhat surprise to see him like this for she has never seen him this vulnerable before. This was all new to her. She had always envied and despised Maki. Not just because she had stolen his heart from her, but also because of her ability to make him this weak and vulnerable. She was marveled by Jaejoong’s strong passion and devotion to Maki. She now truly fathoms Jaejoong’s genuine love for her, the love that she never experienced, and the love she had always longed for. She took his hand, opened it and placed it gently on her cheek. Jaejoong felt her shiver as she pressed his freezing hand lightly on her cheek. “What are you doing? You’ll get cold you know?” he warned her, but she shook her head instead.“It’s alright. It’s not you fault this hand is cold.” He stared at her with bewilderment, ambiguous of what she meant by it. “It must have been difficult for you,” she continued, “to bear all these weight by yourself.” His mouth opened slightly. “Hyojoo,” he stared into her eyes and he saw pain and sincerity in them. “Fate can sometimes inflict people with so much anguish. But you know what? In spite of everything, a ray of light will always descend from the darkness no matter what. Don’t think that you’re all alone. Human beings are weak; they can’t survive all on their own you know? They need someone to help and support them.” He listened to her intently. As he listened to her earnest words, somehow he could feel her sadness in him.“Do you know? My heart is pained whenever I see you in distress,” She wrapped her hands tightly around his hand and placed it over her chest. He could feel her heart beat fast. “I hate seeing you like this. But no matter how much I try to hate you, I would always find myself forgiving you.” She wasn’t quite sure why she was suddenly telling him all of this. For some reason, everything was just flowing right out of her. All of those feelings she had always hid from him, she had finally conveyed. Tears began to stroll down her rosy cheek. He watched her as she wiped them off with her shirt sleeve. “Everyone is looking for a place where they can mend their frozen heart. If it was me, I’d make your heart warm once more with eternal tenderness. So don’t be afraid, don’t falter anymore, because for you that place is here.” She pointed her index finger at her chest. “Let me warm that frozen heart of yours.” “Hyojoo,” He could feel a small twinge inside his heart after listening to her sudden confession. He never knew she had always felt this way towards him. All this time he had been disregarding her feelings and thought he was the only one suffering. All this time he never knew she was suffering along with him. She let go of his hand and she slowly stood up from the ground. Tears continued to fall down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them off with her palms, but the tears won’t cease from falling. She looked away so that he wouldn’t see through her tears. Although she tried to hide her tears from him, she couldn’t hide her true feelings from him. He felt sorry for her, but he truly admires her strength. He knows how much courage it took for her to confess her true feelings for him.“Umm………I think I’ll head home first,” She said before turning around and running off. He watched her back disappear as she made her way down the graveled path.The snow continued to fall over him. He stayed where he was, still contemplating about what she said. Somehow her words made a huge impact on him. When he listened to her, he felt like the whole world had stop. In that moment he had forgotten all about his sorrow and his loneliness. His lassitude had somehow worn away.When he finally got back to his senses, he pushed himself up from the ground and ran after her. He can’t just leave her like this. He knew what he had to do.‘Hyojoo? Hyojoo? Where are you?’ He searched around the perimeter of the cemetery, but he didn’t find her anywhere there. He made his way out of the cemetery and searched the streets.When he turned around the corner of the street he finally spotted her. She was on the other side of the road walking with her head low and her feet staggering on the ground. He tried to cross the street, but the cars kept on coming in both directions. He wanted to get through the other side immediately, but it was too dangerous. He shook his head violently, and without giving it another thought he ran across the road like a maniac dodging cars that were running at full speed. As he made his way across, the cars were honking at him, the drivers were yelling at him to get off the road, and people on both sides of the street watched in horror.Hyojoo turned around when she heard all of the commotions. To her surprise she saw Jaejoong on the middle of the road trying to get through the passing cars.“Jaejoong!” She called out. “What are you doing?!” Jaejoong ignored her and just focused on getting to the other side. When he saw his chance, he immediately ran before a car could pass by.When he finally reached the side walk, he was greeted by his now furious friend. “Jaejoong, you idiot!” She banged her fists lightly on his chest. “Why did you run across the road!? You could’ve gotten killed!? Why—” She was silenced by Jaejoong’s embrace. Her eyes widen when she felt Jaejoong gently wrap his arms around her. “Jaejoong…..” she said in astonishment.“Hyojoo…..you’re the idiot,” He started out. “Didn’t you say people are weak beings, and that they need someone to help and support each other?” She nodded her head lightly in response. “Then why didn’t you tell me that you were suffering all this while? I could’ve helped you. I could have lessened the pain.” Her eyes became teary again as she listened to him. He felt his chest become wet from her tears. “Babo (idiot) don’t cry.” He raised his hand and he began to softly caress her head. “This time let’s work together. Let’s both help each other find that light, the light that will guide us out of the darkness. Let’s both help each other find that place where we can both mend out broken hearts. Together, we’ll surely find it.” Hyojoo nodded her head earnestly. She then buried her face onto his shirt as she continued to cry her eyes out. Jaejoong hugged her tighter, comforting her and reassuring her that everything will be fine.She could feel her heart slowly thaw from his warm embrace. She finally experienced that love and warmth that she had always longed for. For the first time she felt like she could fly. She never thought that being hugged tightly by someone like this would make her feel so happy. She never knew that being loved by someone or by anyone will make her life shine like this. She wanted time to stand still so that she could hold him forever, but she knew it wouldn’t last forever. Even though their moment together was only ephemeral, inside her heart that beautiful time with him was eternal.