Tuesday, September 30, 2008

For those of us who remember the great movie “The Perfect Storm” that is what it surely feels like here in the United States.

I am blessed to have homes in Lahore, New York and Miami in Florida. I was fortunate when, despite all of them being under attack by forces of nature, they all survived. Everyone in Lahore, including my family, as well as many other residents of Pakistan, felt recent earthquake tremors. That same week Long Island in New York was facing one hurricane, while Miami was threatened by the massive hurricane Ike, which later went on to hit Texas.

But, though I, and many others, were very lucky in all of these coincidental storms passing by without causing any serious damage to me or my property or endangering anyone in my family or loved ones, forces apparently even bigger than nature had a lot more in store for us.

One such force, seemingly bigger than nature’s fury, was nothing less than the Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin, who seems nothing less than God’s punishment for any wrongs America may have done.

She apparently is on a mission to do nothing short of God’s work, even more than the previous Bible thumper in the White House, George W. Bush was. She is seen on videotapes telling people that it is God’s work to drill for oil in Alaska. So, I can only imagine how much she will feel it is God’s work to attack Russia and be puttin’ Putin in his place. Or, as a gun-lover, moose-killer, what heat she may be plannin’ on packin’ on Pakistan - to do more God’s work here?

Apparently this vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin is already acting more like the lead of the McCain-Palin ticket. Even more worrisome, she is said to be member of an even crazier group of Bible-thumping, Armageddon-seeking Crusading Christians than Bush was. John McCain and his campaign are doing a lot to try to hide all that is wrong with Sarah Palin and her candidacy. But, they need not bother. Apathetic Americans are what they are counting on most and my fellow Americans are sitting all over their increasingly large behinds to oblige.

Apparently, winning the elections at all costs, including shoving into power the most inappropriate, controversial, power-hungry, incompetent, nepotism practicing, family enriching, corrupt and partisan person available is not the provenance only of Pakistani politicians and Parliament members. They are not the only ones whose loyalty lies more with their political party than their own country.

It seems my fellow Americans, and the Republican Party, are quite capable of doing even more so to sell out their country just to win an election than my fellow Pakistanis and People’s Party “jialas” are. Lucky me, I belong to both countries.

There can simply be no other explanation for how quickly Sarah Palin has come to prominence and how much she is now driving the agenda. She is the beloved of the far right, fringe extremist groups of Christians in America. Yet, just like Bush, even more actually, she is the sweetheart of the Zionist, Israeli-agents, the repulsive, ugly, dangerous and secret enemies of America like Richard Perle.

That man, whose ugly face, and uglier agenda, you will probably remember was another so-called architect of the disastrous war in Iraq, alongside William Kristol. Perle was the leading voice of lies and deceit, which made up the complete fabrication that led to the war in Iraq. Together Kristol and Perle, and their Zionist hench-creatures, exploiting the fundamentalist Christians belief in helping the Israel mentioned in their version of the Bible, are back at it, shaping the agenda to suit Zionism.

These neo-conservatives, the so-called neo-cons, are the ones who had a global agenda of using American military might to shape the Middle East and then the rest of the word in the image that they see fit.

In Sarah Palin they have found a candidate of even more malleable, almost silly putty based, mental capability than George Bush.

The problem they had with George W. Bush was that he is so often appearing stupid, that he was as much a liability for their movement as an asset. His unique ability to make an ass of himself, as well as his disastrous management of the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, led to these neo-con evil-doers being sidelined for a bit.

The Republican Party’s desperation to seek the far-right wing vote, and to hang on to power at any cost, including destruction of long-term American interests, has given these vile creatures the perfect opportunity to line up another perfect storm.

This second perfect storm is comprised of many things, all based on the need to ensure a Republican administration continues to run, and ruin, this country.

It includes the damage being done to world affairs and American interests by the outgoing administration off George W. Bush, including now almost starting to wage war on, and inside, Pakistan. It covers their desire not to be prosecuted for war crimes in Iraq, or being charged for economic frauds and rape of the American economy committed on their watch. And, for the right-wing Christians behind them, we have their not so secret desire to bring about a clash of civilizations.

With Sarah Palin, they have a nasty but seemingly likable, intellectually shallow but attractive, cunning but overall uneducated, tough sounding but moldable, gun toting cowgirl with lipstick, who is just ultraconservative yet hypocritical enough to be the perfect element to complete a perfect storm.

As if the United States needed any more trouble, on top of the latest bombing of an American Embassy in Yemen, shows Bush’s so-called War no Terror, did not protect American interests. A third perfect storm of perfect storms is brewing and now actually hammering the economic shores of the United States.

As if the full scale shipping of American jobs to India and other countries was not enough, as if the shipping of almost all medium-sized and even heavy manufacturing to China was not enough, the economically disastrous policies of George W. Bush and Vice-President Dick Cheney, led to a total economic meltdown which is currently underway.

As an American citizen, with 20 years invested in this great country, I am a one of thousands, if not millions, who have literally watched all their life savings disappear over the last few weeks, and especially just in the last two or three days. And this week, month and quarter are not even over. This definitely was not the week to be an American Gladiator in the stock market. Whether Noora-Kushti planned by politicians and big business, or just big bust-ness of the economy, we feel pummeled by this, yet another, “The Perfect Storm.”

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

President Zardari, the whole nation and almost the whole world have congratulated you on your ascension to the highest office in our land. Your political party also controls Parliament and most of the provincial bodies. The Armed Forces have, showing wisdom and loyalty to the Constitution of Pakistan, stayed out of the fray. Past allies and even competitors have shown political civility towards you. For the first time in recent history of Pakistan there is not a group of politicians sitting outside the tent throwing rocks, claiming the President is illegitimate. On top of that, you can even leverage your historic domestic opportunity to win advantages for Pakistan on the global affairs scene. As a Pakistani writer, and later as an American TV and media commentator, I have always loudly complained about the way America and Americans want to see democracy around the world, but American policymakers love to deal with, and support, dictators, especially in Pakistan. Even in this, fate is on your side, at least at present. As I said during a recent interview on the very popular and influential Fox News Channel, in having you as President of Pakistan, America and American policymakers can get what they both want; a democratically elected Pakistani President with almost dictatorial powers, but without the bad aftertaste of a military regime.Talking about fate, it seems the alignment of the stars favors you in one more way. Thanks to the foolish, even America-destroying, policies adopted by President George W. Bush, the United States has turned its post September 11, 2001 surplus of global goodwill into a huge deficit. His actions have made and are making America, and my fellow Americans, widely reviled among the very people who once loved us. Not content with destruction of America’s foreign goodwill, Mr. Bush has also taken the huge economic surplus left by ex-President Bill Clinton, and turned that into a huge, and growing, budget deficit. The result is the weakening of the sole-superpower, the United States of America, and enabling opportunities for other countries to rise up.That is why puny dictators, like the one in North Korea, can play games of one-upmanship with Bush. It is also why Russia was so easily able to walk right into, and take over, parts of the former Soviet state of Georgia. They did it knowing full well that all Bush could do was send the Darth Vader of American politics, Vice President Dick Cheney scampering to the region. All Cheney could do was try to ensure the remaining states did not start quickly falling in line with the latest Russian expansionism.What that means for America is the opportunity to work with a democratically elected President (and Prime Minister) of Pakistan, both belonging to the same party, which also enjoys a clear mandate by the nation to solve problems. What that means for Pakistan, under your government, is to exploit your position, not for further personal gain, or to benefit your friends and supporters, but to gain greater benefits for Pakistan and Pakistanis.When I first heard about it, I thought you were doing well by heading to China, a supposedly stalwart Pakistani ally, but which recently has started building close relations with India. But now I hear that trip may be on hold. I still think you should not ignore China in this manner.I also think it is imperative that you reach out to the Russians. I have always been anti-Soviet, and am no fan of Russia or its grand designs. But, at this juncture in time and history, it is imperative for Pakistan to finally, and fully, exploit its geo-strategic opportunities. Former Communist and Socialist states are now more and more Capitalistic, at least in their economies. Therefore, it is even easier for you, and Pakistan, to build relationships with, what I call, a “Commutalist” China and a Resurgent Russia.Let no one think for a moment that I have forsaken my lifelong disdain for Communism, Socialism and all things Soviet. I actually think Pakistan reaching out to Russia is in the interest of both countries I am citizen of, Pakistan and the United States.How is that possible? Well, it is long standing US policy to exploit Pakistan as a willing satellite and then to walk away from it to go woo India, for example. Having a Pakistan that can as easily walk into the arms of China and Russia actually will help ensure American policymakers show more wisdom in dealing with Pakistan.What this enables you to do is leverage the situation and work with America. It lets you gain back the trust we lost in the post-9/11 age. It helps you gain facilities that Pakistan has never enjoyed, despite being a loyal American friend for six decades. During this time, a supposedly non-aligned, but Soviet-allied, India has gained incredibly huge business benefits. Even worse, it is now getting closer and closer to the United States militarily. To add insult to an even bigger injury, it is India that is now getting civilian nuclear technology from the Bush government. The lame duck government of General Musharraf had ample time to prevent this terrible decision from being made by the lame duck administration of George W. Bush. Despite having American policy being totally based on his persona, General Dictator Musharraf, and his lazy cohorts, hardly tried to do more than just get enough funds from America to keep them in power. Even if they did try, they failed miserably to stop India’s brilliant and confident march on to the world stage. India has managed to stand next to the United States as a democracy peer, and one day as a military one too. Even more brilliantly, India has done this without jeopardizing its relationship with the Russians.What kind of slap in the face, kick in the pants, or punch in the nose does a Pakistani government need to see how quickly, and how effectively, Pakistan is being sidelined on the global stage?The need of the hour from you, on the world stage, is to show that Pakistan means business; not that ruling Pakistan is just a business. It is essential to insist that America immediately, sincerely and boldly increase its development aid to Pakistan. But you have to ensure transparency in linking such development funds to specific national level projects, be they dams, power plants or roads and infrastructure in underdeveloped areas of Pakistan. With your mandate, and the powers you are yet to show signs of relinquishing, you can easily push through long-stalled projects essential to national development and even survival.Insist and demand that American nuclear power companies, with some of the world’s best civilian nuclear technology, be allowed to build, own and operate nuclear power plants in Pakistan. This is mutually beneficial. The American nuclear industry segment, which is very close to the Bush and his interests, gets opportunities to grow their global business. Pakistan gets the fastest possible mechanism for producing cheapest possible energy. And, this gets done while ensuring these civilian energy related nuclear projects do not get bogged down in nuclear non-proliferation issues.Instead of increasing reliance on aging US-supplied military hardware, especially Zia-era aircraft like the F-16s, you must try to expand the horizons of Pakistan’s defense forces. To build our own capabilities, you must invite and encourage Pakistan’s private sector and technology entrepreneurs to build and provide military grade technologies to our armed forces.At the same time, Pakistan must make sincere efforts to win America’s trust. You must leverage Pakistan’s geo-strategic location. Your government has to show solid results in the war on terror, which is now “our war” as much as America’s. Your government should work to help stabilize Afghanistan and earn the right and privilege to be at par with, if not ahead, of the technologies America is giving India. I can think of many reasons why my fellow Americans must realize that India is a long-term threat to US military and strategic interests in the region. I am sure your brilliant foreign affairs experts can give you many more. Yet, India has all world powers falling over each other to sell it weapons and give it technology and business. Why can’t Pakistan do the same? Pakistan should reach out to European, Russian and American governments and defense manufacturers to seek the best they have to offer. To exploit to the fullest the foreign relations opportunities you have been blessed with, I suggest that you reach out to, and visit, the largest powers that impact us directly. You must meet with the leaders of China, Russia, the United States as well as India. Going to Dubai to take care of any kind of non-strategic, non-mission-critical, or personal business is a bad move. Blowing off China and rushing to our former colonizers in the United Kingdom at their slightest beckoning is a move Pakistan, and your government, will regret in the long run.My suggestion is still to visit China, Russia, possibly Saudi Arabia. I would also add France, Germany and Japan to the list, while having your experts consider visiting a Muslim country like Malaysia that has done well on the global economic scene.Yes, later, you should also visit the UK, and the USA and the UAE and any other country that you have an interest in. But, now is not the time to rush there. When the time is right, when you have established a modicum of Pakistani sovereignty and independence, in the eyes of these countries, only then should you visit them. Believe me, you will find them more respectful and receptive to you if they know you are not rushing to their arms.Ironically, even then, the loud and clear message you have to carry, as a democratically elected Pakistani President, is best summed in the words of a former dictator. The people of Pakistan seek relationships with all these countries…. as our “Friends, Not Masters.”

Friday, September 12, 2008

It is hard to imagine it was nearly 16 years ago that a brash, bold politician named Bill Clinton put his media-savvy personality, charm, good looks and sax-playing ability to good use on American television. He showed up on TV as a guest of the now-defunct show with Arsenio Hall. (You remember him as the guy whose face flashes in the hit song “Straight Up (Now Tell Me)” by singer-dancer-choreographer, and now a judge on the hit TV show “American Idol”, the cute bundle of energy, Paula Abdul). Clinton did not do this while running for Mayor of some small town, but as a Presidential candidate of the United States of America.Political analysts, and pundits, diverged in their views on the move. Some thought it cheapened the Presidency, making Presidential candidates act like actors or musicians hawking their latest books on late night shows of Jay Leno or David Letterman, or showing their tender sides on Oprah Winfrey’s show. Others thought it was a brilliant move. It enabled Clinton to connect with a politically disconnected youth population that was more interested in how high Madonna’s skirt was than in how low global opinion of America was.In the end, Clinton won. This was partly for his savvy moves, and partly because George H. W Bush (father of the current lame-duck American President George Bush) was a clueless President who oversaw the US economy sliding into recession. (Like father, like son?)And in the long run, American politics became even more inextricably mixed with show business, and the selling of candidates as products not leaders.The victory of style over substance was visible all through the current Presidential election campaign now taking place in America. Despite not having too much experience, Barack Obama was able to use his star power and personality, his eloquence and some great ideas, to build a campaign. This has enabled him to overcome even the challenges of being inexperienced, Black and having a Muslim sounding name! He was able to beat out Hilary Clinton (who should possibly have learnt to play Guitar or Saxophone like her husband). Obama made a far more experienced and well-known Senator John McCain have to play catch up throughout the campaign.But what advantage show-biz type political exposure giveth, so does it taketh away. John McCain’s campaign was in dire straits (some say it still is). But, more than any specific problems, it suffered the worst malaise in the world of politics today – it lacked “interestingness.” There was just nothing exciting about a Presidential candidate who, despite being a war hero and long term senator, was seventy-something years old, and totally boring. He had sided with George W. Bush in his disastrous policies on Iraq, and had no clues on how to solve Americans’ other major concern, the failing economy. On top of that he was jumping around from issue to issue. He was weakly trying to appear relevant in a world driven by the star power of Barack Obama. His old guard Republican money machine, often selling out American interests to oil companies and the military industrial complex was being beaten by Obama’s money and public awareness juggernaut on the Internet. Youth was lacking in McCain and his campaign, while it was central in Obama’s campaign.To make matters worse, McCain actually tried to cut into Obama’s mass popularity by implying that he was a mindless celebrity. In a now infamous TV commercial, McCain ridiculed Obama by comparing him to blonde bimbos like Britney Spears and Paris Hilton (previously my target of ridicule in another article). The only thing was, the technique backfired.Paris Hilton (“famous for being famous” and infamous for her interesting “home videos”) was the wrong target to poke fun of. Not only was Paris Hilton’s mother a donor to McCain’s election campaign, to her credit, Paris Hilton played along and turned the tables. Enjoying being the center of attention, she turned that into her own political ad. You can see it on YouTube ridiculing John McCain, his campaign and so-called energy policies. During all these McCain blunders, Hilary Clinton kept fighting Obama for the Democratic nomination. This time around, though, her very popular husband, Bill Clinton lost his groove, and was not able to swing support in her favor. Maybe it is because he said politically incorrect things while tooting his and his wife’s horn, but he also did not show up on TV to play the saxophone. That may have worked better than some of the things he said. Result: Hilary lost to Obama.It seemed like a done deal for Obama to beat McCain. To top things off, Obama, whom the Republicans accuse of being inexperienced, chose quite a good candidate for Vice President. Senator Joseph Biden, while even more talkative than me after having four drinks of Pepsi and coffee, has vast foreign policy and Washington experience. That is when the Obama campaign seems to have lost some momentum. Instead of building on this great candidacy they appear a bit rudderless right now. There is also the question of race. When someone asked the question “Is America ready for a Black President?” one of my favorite TV personalities in America, John Stewart, reportedly said that before Bush’s election “No one asked if we were ready for a moron President!” But, whether Obama can turn his dynamic rise into a historical election remains to be seen.That is when John McCain did the dumbest thing in the world – which just may put him into the running again to be President. After ridiculing Obama for his lack of experience, seeing that Hilary’s loss had upset some women voters and people wanted change – he picked a very inexperienced woman governor of Alaska to become his Vice President. How poorly selected was this woman, Sarah Palin? After she was nominated it came to light that, despite the Republican’s often holier-than-thou attitudes and anti-choice agendas, Mrs. Palin’s underage daughter is pregnant. Now the Republicans are trying to sound more “open minded”. Instead of Palin’s daughter’s boyfriend being arrested for the crime of statutory rape, he was sitting front row at the Republican National Convention. What a joke.But, wait, there’s more! Candidate Sarah Palin’s selected was so poorly vetted, it has now also been found that her husband belonged to some sort of militia or anti-USA organization that wanted Alaska to secede from the USA. Good old Sarah Palin also had used office funds for her personal use. On top of that, she used State funds to hire the lawyer to defend her in the case of that corruption. And we complain about Pakistani politicians!You would think all these reasons would be enough even for a corrupt Pakistani political party to throw out the candidate in question. But, for the Republicans desperate to breathe new life into a comatose candidate like McCain, she is nothing short of a miracle. She is not Virgin Mary, but she is their Hail Mary pass at scoring a touchdown this election. Sarah Palin is very attractive, as is McCain’s wife Cindy. This may be an election in which these two women’s looks may well decide the election.Just like selling a new shampoo, the selling of the Presidential candidate to the American public now requires sex appeal, even more than sax appeal!

Friday, September 05, 2008

We all have dreams. In my dreams I am intelligent, dashing, handsome, filthy rich and powerful. I am also wise and highly intellectual, with such great opinions that heads of state call me - or at least listen to what I have to say on matters of great importance. Then, usually, I wake up to reality.

Obviously I am not the only one who has wild dreams. After all, if it were not for dreams, why would people try to run for the office of president of our nation? In many cases they even do this with scant regard for reality. It is also always important to remember the difference between dreams, big dreams and delusions.

I am writing these lines in Karachi. I am here to be a guest on several GEO TV shows discussing the election for President of Pakistan. When I look at the candidates for president, I see a curious mixture of dreams, big dreams and delusions.

The readers of my articles, from back in the 1980s in MAG Weekly and News International, to my current topical blog postings at IMRAN.COM, know very well that I do my best to be fair and balanced, as well as an “Equal Opportunity Offender”.

I say it as I see it, without regard for racial, ethnic, national, political or religious affiliation. That is also why I probably never will be offered a cabinet post by any head of state in Pakistan, elected or otherwise, or any other country.

Since none of the three Presidential candidates in Pakistan has contacted me for my advice, I have to assume it is because they believe I must be very busy. So, to be totally fair, I decided to write to each of them through an open letter in this publication. Like variables in an engineering or Math problem, let’s call them candidates Ex, Why, and z.

To President Ex – Justice (retired) Saeed-uz-Zaman Siddiqui

Sir, I have to give you credit for having a dream. Do I do not know you personally I salute you for being one of the few people in Pakistani elections that I have not heard anyone say totally negative things about. Sure, some may question your affiliation with the Nawaz Sharif party based on past events, but even your critics and non-supporters do not try to rip you to shreds. That, itself, is a major achievement.

You are a man of principle, said to have high integrity and the honor to stand up to a dictator. These are qualities that would get you elected and appointed in any other country.

Unfortunately, in Pakistan, these are the very qualities that would likely ensure you can not be elected president of our great nation. Sure, stranger things have happened. But, I thank you for dreaming and making a run for the presidency.

To President Why – Mr. Mushahid Hussain Syed

You, Sir, are obviously a man who has big dreams. I came to know off and respect you when I was a student political leader at the engineering University in Lahore. This was in the 1980s, when you were making a name for yourself as a journalist standing up to a dictator.

When I joined the ranks of the media industry, as business manager of Jang, and a writer in MAG Weekly, etc. I continued to respect you even though you were at a competing newspaper.

It is, therefore, a huge shock for me to learn that during the last 20 years you went from being an independent minded, outspoken, bold, Muslim media professional and a prisoner of conscience to someone who not only supported but became part of a dictator’s team.

It is easy for me to comment on your decisions to change sides in a political fray, but for you to change completely into the opposite of what you stood for is something I will never understand. In any case, I thank you for dreaming big, and making a run for the presidency. It will hopefully enable educated media professionals to be considered candidates for president in the future.

To President Z – Mr. Asif Ali Zardari

Sir, even though I have never personally met you, it has been my observation that it is nothing that you are understated about. We know that the other candidates have dreams and big dreams, possibly with some delusion thrown in for good measure.

In your case it is obvious that you had a dream, you have big dreams and, you may be suffering from a potent mixture of ambition, hubris and delusions of grandeur.

Apply that on top of a foundation built on a pliant political party machine devoted and dedicated more to a particular individual or a family than to their own roll in national politics, democracy or, heaven forbid, history. Result? You can almost be assured of the presidency. Congratulations.

The way I see it, only a miracle can prevent that.

Now, before you think I must be some anti-PPP, anti-Bhutto, anti-Zardari activist, let me assure you that is not the case. I have had the pleasure of meeting the late great Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto in Karachi as a young teen, the late Benazir Bhutto, as a young media professional, and always been supportive of their role, as individuals, and as a family, in Pakistan’s democracy.

But, I am not a blind worshipper of the Bhutto name. Both those great individuals also failed to live up to the incredible potential, and historic opportunities, God gave them. They paid, in both cases, with their lives and the country paid either with failed experiments in democracy, martial laws or instability.

When I say that only a miracle can keep you from being President, I say that as a will-wisher of Pakistan and the Bhutto legacy – which I suppose is now more of a Zardari family name legacy. And, herein lies the problem.

Ego, ambition, hubris, cunning, ruthlessness, dreams, visions, delusions of grandeur, and perhaps even a dash of madness are not necessarily bad things – especially if they are attached to a person who dreams to change the world, to build empires for his nation, build historic monuments to man’s dreams and ability, to leave a legacy bigger than he himself ever was. Alexander the Great, even Napoleon, and many other “madmen” come to mind.

These same personality traits in more ordinary people, driven merely by desires to conquer real estate markets and build Swiss bank accounts, and to exploit opportunities for short-term gain, can only ensure disasters of history, and historic disasters.

My fear is that you have all the traits we talk about above but lack the vision to see this is a historic opportunity, not just another personal opportunity to “get more rich” and “take care of your friends”.

The sad thing is that even the staunchest Bhutto supporters, from politically connected families, to their servants and man-on-the-street type voters are all but certain that nothing good will come out of your becoming President, regardless of your beautifully worded article in the Washington Post.

You make a compelling argument for why your Presidency is essential. But, I wonder how you expect anyone, much less a jaded nation of 160 million people to believe a word you say, after your reneging even on your own signed agreements with Nawaz Sharif, and your obvious play at controlling the judiciary.

Almost to a man, the impression in every city I have asked people about you is that you are only doing this for personal financial gain at the expense of the country. They feel what may have been true or false impressions of large commissions associated with you as a nickname, will become even larger grabs of power and wealth.

As a result, the false blessing of your becoming President with a weak hand-picked judiciary, ugly constitutional amendments a gift from former dictators, lapdog lawmakers and apathetic public could become a true-curse.

The actions everyone predicts for you may ensure the total erasure of the Bhutto name and goodwill, and any chance for your son and coming Zardari generations from playing a positive, or any role, in the unwritten future history of Pakistan. The even bigger risk for your family and you would be to become “marked men” instead of leaving a great mark on history.

You are actually blessed with truly low expectations from everyone. From judges to generals, from journalists to generalists, from even your own voters, no one expects anything good for Pakistan under your rule.

That actually is a great chance for you personally. You, and only you, can easily, but with some soul-searching, some introspection, some staring at the mirror, some appreciation of where you stand on the crossroads of history, decide to become a truly historic figure - in a nation starved for historic leadership.

Will you, Sir, have the wisdom, decency, moral and political courage and a vision of making a real name for yourself, and your coming generations in history books.?

For your, your children’s and Pakistan’s sake, I hope so.

The nation is standing by to see what path you take. Good luck, President Zardari.