Tag: forgivness

For the past few weeks the Lord has been revealing a lot of hidden sin within my heart which has been so painful at times to see and very humbling to say the least. He has also put me in many test and trials to see my response and it hasn’t been pretty. I found myself at the beginning of this year just utterly spent and my heart so tender and guarded because of all the attacks. Not realizing that I had allowed so many seeds of resentment, anger and bitterness to take root in my heart that I was well on my to becoming a “thorny christian” one who is easily discouraged, unhappy, hurt by criticism, defensive, complaining, impatient, and easily frustrated when things didn’t go the way I desired. Bitterness its truly spiritual leprosy as the Lord describes and he wanted it out of me once and for all!

So how can one accumulate seeds of bitterness, its so easy and such a subtle attack of the enemy because the seeds land without our permission. When we respond to any circumstance, situation or person negatively there goes a seed in our hearts. When we get offended, when we get angry, complain, become resentful seeds fall and if we don’t repent immediately they take root in our hearts and began to grow like thorns in our body. Oh how it can affect us physically too, per a prophetic message from Still Small Voice ministry which is a ministry that I am apart of. The Lord revealed that the root cause of cancer is bitterness. Listen to message how demons work! You see it a set up by the enemy which we allow and many are so unaware because many times, many, many times we don’t respond like Christ. We respond in our flesh which is almost always selfish there for the seeds fall right into our hearts and create thorn bushes. From the messages: Brambles In the Vineyard, Bitterness is Spiritual Leprosy“This indeed is what becomes of the soul who entertains bitterness; all life is chocked out. There you will find jealousy, hatred, resentment, depression, judgment, impatience, selfishness, cruelty, retaliation, pride, and every noxious, dark thought known to man.”

Matthew 13:22The seed sown among the thorns is the one who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, and it becomes unfruitful

Anytime we take offense at anything or anyone a seed of bitterness enters into our hearts. You know many times I had met people who said they were believers but who where unhappy, mean, and critical of others. They would say there were fine but when they would speak they just sounded so bitter and I never thought I would get there, really never. Its by Gods mercy that he has revealed this to me so this thorn bushes wouldn’t continue to grow and choke Gods word, grace and love within me which would in-turn stifle and hurt those around me. You see when you have seeds of bitterness within it not only affects but hurts those around us. When the enemy strikes he loves not just to bring you down but those around you so when you respond so negatively by lashing out or in anger it not only offends but, hurts the person who is receiving it. Thereby causing them to receive seeds as well. This tactic works best with those closest round you its a tactic of division the enemy has planned to attack every form of relationship at it works so well because its so subtel and we can be so ignorant of his schemes but not anymore by Gods grace!

The way to stop these seeds of bitterness from not only entering but taking root is to receive all bad and good things from the hand of the Lord with joy! We have to come to understanding as Christians that the Lord doesn’t cause everything but he allows everything and if we are called according to his purpose he will work it out for good. Its nice to throw a scripture on it but lets be honest when things happen that prick our flesh that goes right out the window in that moment lol. However, we have to mature in our christian walk to count all things as joy its a process for me but I have made a firm resolute to stand in my joy and say no more to my flesh, these devils and no more seeds in Jesus name..with the help of Holy Spirit of course! 🙂

Nehemiah 8:10joy of the Lord is your strength!

We must guard our mouths and recognize whatever situation we may be in whatever remark that has offended us it is the Lord that has willed it. So we must receive it as joy but when we get angry it truly directed at the Lord. So lets make a firm resolution NO MORE SEEDS! With the help of the Holy Spirit we can all overcome but we must make a firm resolution to tackle this . So when we find ourselves responding to something negatively immediately repent! Below the Lord has given us direction how to be delivered from these seeds of bitterness3 Step Direction from Deliverance of Bitterness Daily
1)examine your actions, feeling and thoughts
2) Forgive anyone your holding resentment against
3.) Repent for ungrateful attitude because it is the Lord who allowed it
Pray “Lord please heal anyone I have offended”

May the Lord give us the grace for our hearts to respond in JOY from now on!

So the Lord wants to show you kindness. He waits on high to have loving-pity on you. For the Lord is a God of what is right and fair. And god will come to all those who hope in Him

The Lord just gave me this scripture after falling again…(sigh) just right after I got out of prayer with him and gave me scriptures on Obedience. I was telling the Lord man you are humbling me I cant seem to go an hour without a fall Lord . So instead of running from him I ran to him and received Mercy. Oh how kind and sweet our God is indeed if we just run to him. I have been asking the Lord to humble me and he has indeed doing that where he is really revealing all my hidden sins and struggles which causes me not to even think to judge others or walk in pride because I see how weak I am and indeed of his mercy so that i may give others mercy as well.

Luke 6:36Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

This past week I have found myself falling in every way and every day in faultfinding, quick tempered, impatient and even gossip under the guise of “lets pray for them” lol You know we have all been there and done that which is an offense before the Lord. You see I prayed for the lord to purify my heart and he has been doing just that where I am able to feel it…yes I feel heat on my back and pain in my body when I have fallen which is a grace and a gift he allows. Which I believe he has given to many of his other brides to keep us spiritually healthy and in check. It causes me to run to him immediately with this wonderful (trying not to be sarcastic here…Lord forgive me) answered pray the Lord has given me. I found myself being taunted by the enemy that it seemed I couldn’t do anything right, I began to feel so down and discouraged almost to the point of hopelessness. However, after having a conversation with a friend she reminded me that it was great the Lord has really called me to purity and I am always willing to confess even the littlest offenses to others which gives her room to d the same but it seems like I dwell there. That I didn’t need to dwell there, yes I had fallen but the Lord had already made a way for all my sins, so confess , repent and move forward. I am not sure why something clicked in that moment and decided I wouldn’t allow the enemy to continue to use my faults against me any longer

In prayer the Lord showed me the most beautiful image of me just swimming, more like floating in this beautiful crystal clear pristine VAST ocean as the sun was kissing my face. I was in pure joy and the Holy spirit said ” You are swimming in the ocean of Gods mercy”. Many times the enemy will use our faults against us especially those the Lord has called to intimacy because we so want to please him in everything we do and can be devastated when we sin against him but, the Lord was reminded me of his mercy.

Mercy:

noun

1.compassion or forgiveness shown toward someone whom it is within one’s power to punish or harm.

power to punish or harm.

Somewhere along the way I had taken my eyes of Jesus and so much on my weakness that I have forgotten He always makes a way available for us all and that is his mercy. The Ocean of Gods mercy is endless, never ending, so peaceful, so filled with love and readily available for all those who humble themselves and boldly come before their Fathers throne to receive it. I am definitely in a season of swimming in the Ocean of Gods Mercy as I continue to be tested tried, fall, repent receive mercy to be tested again. If it wasnt for his mercy I am not sure where I would be….well maybe I do lol Jesus is so tender is so patience in the midst of this that I felt him say in my heart yesterday “its okay, tomorrow is another day just try to do better tomorrow” just to fall again….

What does Jesus have to say….”Beloved, its okay tomorrow is another day try to do better tomorrow walk in obedience to my every word and you will have peace as you continue to swim in the Ocean of my mercy, I love you my dove, oh how I love you. Don’t be discouraged by your weakness but continue to boast in them as you bring them before me so I can strengthen you with more graces”. So if you find yourself struggling with your weaknesses and sin before Lord don’t run away from him but jump, jump, JUMP into the Ocean of his mercy which is readily available for you, He loves you!

I found myself this weekend kind of avoiding my alone time with the Lord as my heart and mind were swarming with thoughts of discouragement, frustration, weariness, discontent, and confusion. For the past couple of days I have been having difficulty in hearing from the Lord clearly and I would seek him for a rhema word yet not really understand what he was directing me to do. I was getting words from him about “Laziness” twice in a row (eeeh I hate getting that besides sin and pride, makes me cringe) The rhema book provided scriptures on slothfulness so anytime the Holy Spirit gives me laziness it definitively not a good thing. He then also gave me rhemas about specifically being given priceless gifts from heaven and I need to use them or on that day before the Lord I will have many sorrows. So I felt the Holy Spirit telling me I am being passive or lazy about work, ministry work to be exact. Not utilizing my gifts for the kingdom with the time he has given me. The confusion came because I am not working at this time which I strongly believe was a commission from the Lord to trust him to open the door to the place he wants me at and not just any job. Then he gave me another rhema of “Submitting to Authority” I began to see how serious he was thinking what have I missed because I have been patiently waiting for 8 months, so getting this word twice threw me in a spat of confusion. Which of course opened the door to the enemies oppression.

James 4:7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

I began to entertain lies from the enemy and get in my flesh. I found myself complaining and honestly being frustrated with the Lord ( I know) but, I was. It has been difficult this season being back home believing it was God’s will. Babysitting watching my nieces pretty mush the whole half of the day whiles my sister works. Then trying to squeeze ministry work in late at night even staying up way into the AM just to get things done. So as I began to resist the Lords admonishments I opened my heart to receive all the arrows of the enemy saying ” I missed God”, “whats the point”, “everything I am doing is in vain anyway” “what I am doing is not good enough”, “He was the one who told you to come here so how can he expect you to be focused in this environment”. Yes I began to entertain all these thoughts and lies, as I did I began to run to food for comfort as well in the midst of my fast, just feeling like throwing in the towel to give up already. Thoughts of overwhelming sadness, my heart hurting, disappointment grief, and condemnation came over me. So I knew I had to rush into prayer to repent, ask the Lord to clean my heart but I had been avoiding this the whole day. I knew Jesus doesn’t condemn but, I kept thinking oh how I bet he will be disappointment and I deserve this oppression and to be honest I just didn’t feel like praying .

(SIDE NOTE: SPIRITUAL WARFARE 101 Whenever in your walk with the Lord you don’t feel like praying that’s when you NEED TO PRAY all that the more!)

However, when I finally stop fighting my flesh and got into prayer so I can pour my heart out before the Lord in tears. I saw a picture impression upon my heart, of course it wasnt a mad God who had his finger pointing at me saying “how could you”, I am mad at you, or even disappointment. No, I saw Jesus with the sweetest smile just waiting and before I could say or do anything I felt him say “Come hear” and he held me ever so tightly so close to his heart as my head was under his chin. All I could do was began to cry and cry. After a few of him holding me I wanted to let go and look him in the face and he wouldn’t let me as if to say. Its okay, just rest hear don’t be so quick to do anything but just stay right here and He held me even more tightly with the greatest compassion and love. I was like Jesus I don’t deserve this, and he said your right you don’t but its my mercy and love for you, that will never change. We had the sweetest communion and of course the Holy Spirit picked the best songs about falling short, stumbling into sin and the last to not give up!

I realized in prayer that I had been walking in a posture of entitlement before the Lord which the root is all pride. That in giving my whole life to the Lord and upon walking in obedience in the midst of this suffering I deserved some things and If they were not coming I had every right to be frustrated. I couldn’t believe how nasty my heart was, wow that I felt entitled. I felt the holy spirit tell me “We don’t deserve his goodness or his judgment”. Wow, we don’t deserve neither, when the Lord saves us, transforms us and even reveals himself to us its all by his mercy. We don’t deserve any of that and when we walk in condemnation, guilt or shame and we believe or the enemy tells us we deserve consequences that’s a lie because we don’t deserve that either. Jesus took upon the cross all of these things so we can walk free freedom as a son or daughter of God without condemnation. How many Christians feel that way in their hearts sometimes and both thoughts make us run away from God rather than too him. The beautiful thing is what we are entitled too as Christians is Free grace, mercy, love, compassion, and companionship because of the sacrifice and blood of our sweet Jesus! SO RUN TO HIM NOT FROM HIM, YOU ARE FORGIVEN!

One day a few weeks I went and a walk with the Lord just talking to him about some recent situations I went though where I was hurt by someone I cared about. I continued speaking to him about my past wounds from others and He said “They are all gift to you, every person I have brought in your life is a gift to you. Whether they have been good to you or not they are all my precious gifts to you” I was flabbergasted to say the least but the Holy spirit began to give me a deeper understanding of what he was saying. Those in my life who have hurt me have caused me to exercise patience, forgiveness to grow in virtue and even bare much fruit for him. So many times and just in our society we discount people, we hold sometimes okay let me be honest, in our generation we hold material things, class, status, even animals at a greater esteem then people. However, that is so backwards because in all of creation were the only ones created in Gods image and he made us just a little lower then the angels:

Hebrew 2:6-7What is man, that You are mindful of him, or the son of man, that You care for him? You made them a little lower than the angels; you crowned them with glory and honor

You see the Lord has chosen man as his dwelling place. Not a temple, not a building, not a location, not a mountain, not even the sky but he has chosen his son’s and daughters to indwell within then by the Holy Spirit. So when we love on people we don’t just love on them but we love on God!

1 Corinthians 3:16Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in your midst?

At that time of this conversation I was pouring out my heart to the Lord telling him of the pain of being accused, slandered and talked against. I began to compare my walk with him to others around me. Complaining that my walk seemed so much more difficult and he said its because of your calling….(which I still don’t know by the way, don’t you love when he continues to leave you hanging but still yearning for more of him lol). The Holy spirit then put this on my heart that when we measure and compare our suffering based on what others go through rather than what Christ went through for us then that could lead us into depression, resentment, bitterns and even unforgiveness. Furthermore, if the measure of Gods glory and favor on our lives becomes based on comparing ourselves to others than it can easily lead to pride. Looking down on others and even thinking you’re more spiritual mature but, the only measure in all things should be and is Jesus Christ, his glory and his suffering. Neither of these can compare to man’s suffering or glory we go partake in on the earth. So my little measly suffering I am going through is nothing compared to what Jesus did on the on the cross for me…..so to say the least that shut me up real quick lol but, it was such a beautiful revelation.

He went on to say that people indeed are the greatest gifts on this earth and that did I forget that he uses ALL things for my good. He uses people to fulfill his purpose upon the earth and even in our lives. Every person he has brought in my life has made me better. He has brought people in my life to encourage me, to propel me when I felt like I couldn’t go forward. He brought people in my life to love me to show me what his heart looks like in order that I may began to love also. Then he has brought people in my life to teach me lessons, to allow the uglies in my own heart to be brought to the light so that may repent and have a pure heart. He has brought people in my life who have hurt me which allows me to exercise patience, forgiveness to grow in virtue and bare much fruit for him. So that’s why this person and all people are a gift good or bad.

I would like to share two vision one from a pastor and the other from a man who went to heaven. The pastor stated the Lord gave him a vision one day of being taking to this art gallery and he saw a huge monument of a man beautifully chiseled from head to toe. This man looked exquisite almost out of this world he was in awe when he saw it and asked Jesus who is this man? and Jesus said “its you”. He was in speechless, then Jesus asked would you like to see the two man who created this masterpiece he said yes…and the Lord took him to the other side of the monument and he was in complete shock. There were two men he recognized very well. He actually had despised them for a time because they were two critics of his ministry. They came to church every Sunday, sat on the front row for years and wrote many articles to tear down his ministry however, the Lord told him to continue to love on them and forgive them. Jesus stated that he used them to bring out much fruit and virtue in him so in fact they brought the best out in him. Isn’t that amazing! The second vision was a man who went to heaven and he stated that the greatest attribute in heaven will not be the knowledge you gain, the things you see or have access too but it will be the citizens of heaven. Each person is like heaven, for they radiate the purest love and joy that you will ever encounter…haha isn’t that wonderful, each person is like heaven itself that makes me smile!

So if we would then began to see people as gifts as they are, if we see children as the greatest gift then we would no longer abort or even consider abortion. If we see family and friends as gifts, if we would see strangers as gifts, if we would see especially those who hurt as the greatest gifts because the Lord uses ALL things for his glory. If you give him the pain, the memory and see from his perspective he will use that person to chisel the most beautiful heart you will ever see….it will be Gods heart now in yours then all you will know how to do is to love everyone despite what they do because they are gift to you, being used to refine, purify and create the purest heart in you. So you can be all that God has called you to be!

Love waits patiently for God’s timing. Love is gentle and shows kindness to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance. Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect; nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love finds delight in the truth, not in what is wrong. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things—and still remains strong. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 The Passion Translation

“The Lord will set a table before you in the presence of your enemies “I hear that scripture quoted a lot in a lot of sermons but to be honest its mentioned in pride so proudly. Not to say the Lord wont do that but, he does exactly that and he sets a table before our enemies just to invite them to dinner as well. Isn’t that just like the heart of God lol. By Gods grace I have come to understand the heart of God concerning souls, they are so precious to him whether wicked, lost, or saved because he has made man his dwelling place. No temple, no building, no specific location but the heart of all men, that’s where he resides for the anyone who will accept him because that’s where we were created from, the Heart of God.

Matthew 5:43-4843 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[a] and hate your enemy.’44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that?47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Many times I have contended with the Lord concerning those who weren’t treating me right, who had hurt me asking the Lord do you not see what they did or what they said in my little pity party and I promise I would hear the Lord so clearly say ” Love them, they are wounded and rejected, that’s why I brought them too you, Love them but, but, he would say again Love them, show my mercy”. Can I say it was and always is difficult to do when you feel you need to be justified but, the Lord calls us to do otherwise not only by his word but in his nature as well. All through out scripture we see many times when Jesus could’ve retaliated, cried out for Abba Fathers justice right then and there instead our beautiful Saviour in his justice cried out for forgiveness and then when even further to lay down his life for his enemies and at the cross.

Luke 23:34
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

I think as Christians we all forget that we were all enemies of the cross before Christ saved us from death into life with him. Scriptures say that yet when we were still sinners he died for us. That is all of us, so why then is it so hard to forgive our enemies, to have mercy and forgive those who have hurt us, accused us, insulted us, took advantage of us, slandered against us, betrayed us, & used us? I am definitely not saying its easy but, with God all things are possible if we just forgive by faith and our truly gracious to those who we consider enemies believe me the Lord will do the rest and began to heal wounds & broken hearts. I was reading Rick Joyner “Final Quest” book detailing a visions & encounters the Lord gave him where he was caught up in heaven and the Lord revealed so much wisdom concerning his nature and character especially in these last days. “He said concerning our enemies “I come to take over not choose sides. I love all Men and desire all men to be saved. I use you to save your enemies” Isn’t that amazing & profound all at the same time!
So let me ask you, who have you been holding a grudge against, who do you consider your enemy , have you been relentless attacks with accusation & slander? Well I can tell you what to do, love them to Christ! Yea, I said it love your enemies to Christ, its his love and kindness in you that will lead them to repentance!

Romans 2:4
Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?

As many things in the nation escalate for the worse. There is a strong division that has been planted by the enemy to divide people through, racism, status, class, religion, etc you name it. Even because of the news and media people now have a impulse to just have hatred, mistrust, and disdain for others because the world has gotten so dark and many Christians have hidden their light under a bushel maybe because of fear but, I encourage you not to hide your light especially your light of love! If you allow your heart to be hardened seeing what is going on then you will be easily used by the enemy to further cause division when our nation begins to fall apart. However, God has called us to stand on him the rock, he is the word, hope and our faith. Faith that perfect love cast out all fear, so by loving our enemies no matter how, wicked they can or will be that it will lead them to repentance and the Christ in you will shine even brighter! So forgive, show mercy, let go, and show grace and mercy to your enemies. Will you do that, began to declare it by faith, walk in that faith and allow the Lord to do the rest and you will be surprised who will be sitting right next to you at the wonderful wedding feast of the bride…..your once thought to be enemy now family! God bless