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I havn't been a member of this forum for long and on reading the different threads and seeing all the various types of responses and also after posting afew myself, I find it all quite fascinating and amusing.

I look at it from the viewpoint of Aikido and thus see all the types of communications just as you can do in life.

One person says 'A' and then in come the responses. Some responses are harmonious, calm , considered, direct yet honest. Others are cutting comments, like a shomen or yokomen. Some are like a nikkyo, a tsuki or if the person is really against what you say- a sankyo. {sankyo very much)

So in life when you observe negative communications you can translate them in this fashion and practice Aikido. Learn to see the attack or technique and understand it and stay calm and cenered, and enjoy the experience.

Someone told me that O'Sensei said in reply to a question on how he did his Aikido:'They come, I meet, I Turn, They follow.'

I can give you a simplified version of this, tongue in cheek of course, as follows;

I havn't been a member of this forum for long and on reading the different threads and seeing all the various types of responses and also after posting afew myself, I find it all quite fascinating and amusing.

I look at it from the viewpoint of Aikido and thus see all the types of communications just as you can do in life.

One person says 'A' and then in come the responses. Some responses are harmonious, calm , considered, direct yet honest. Others are cutting comments, like a shomen or yokomen. Some are like a nikkyo, a tsuki or if the person is really against what you say- a sankyo. {sankyo very much)

So in life when you observe negative communications you can translate them in this fashion and practice Aikido. Learn to see the attack or technique and understand it and stay calm and cenered, and enjoy the experience.

Someone told me that O'Sensei said in reply to a question on how he did his Aikido:'They come, I meet, I Turn, They follow.'

I can give you a simplified version of this, tongue in cheek of course, as follows;

'He come, Ego.'

Given lightheartedly. G.

If I could figure out how to relax when the attacks come that would be nice

I havn't been a member of this forum for long and on reading the different threads and seeing all the various types of responses and also after posting afew myself, I find it all quite fascinating and amusing.

I look at it from the viewpoint of Aikido and thus see all the types of communications just as you can do in life.

One person says 'A' and then in come the responses. Some responses are harmonious, calm , considered, direct yet honest. Others are cutting comments, like a shomen or yokomen. Some are like a nikkyo, a tsuki or if the person is really against what you say- a sankyo. {sankyo very much)

So in life when you observe negative communications you can translate them in this fashion and practice Aikido. Learn to see the attack or technique and understand it and stay calm and cenered, and enjoy the experience.

Someone told me that O'Sensei said in reply to a question on how he did his Aikido:'They come, I meet, I Turn, They follow.'

I can give you a simplified version of this, tongue in cheek of course, as follows;

'He come, Ego.'

Given lightheartedly. G.

So as an equally lighthearted irimi:

What is then the way of dealing with people who pontificate, and dont seem to acknowledge the ego in that?
There have been quite a couple here recently.
(I suffer from it myself )

What is then the way of dealing with people who pontificate, and dont seem to acknowledge the ego in that?
There have been quite a couple here recently.
(I suffer from it myself )

You have to work personally on it, as a human beeing it is normal to suffer from ego. Just don't take yourself that serious, maybe if you think about looking at the earth from another planet, just a little point, then everyting is in the right relation..

Sorry for not understanding you, it is ok.
I hope you too will have a great day.
We will prepare today in a special class an exhibition for next friday
about women mistreatment and self defence for them. So we women will be torys during the whole exhibition

My first post on these forums and I had no idea it would be in this thread but I find this one of interest.

Aikido in all aspects of life is closer than most might imagine.

I find one main key point mentioned in another thread about teaching Aikido, is not to critique the person but the performance. Do so with as much positive direction as possible. Do this for yourself as well when you catch yourself doing something you know you can do better. Do not beat yourself over the head.

I believe it comes down to accepting your situation and not resisting it. Being at peace with each moment as it comes to you. (I know, break out the incense, flowers and chanting monks )

I have realized that the mind tends to wander on us. It dwells on the past or dreams of the future. Rarely is it set to task and focused on the present. When we are at peace and just focused on 'now' we can better deal with anything in life, any perceived attack, physical, verbal, self inflicted moments of doubt, whatever the moment brings.

In Aikido, when we feel resistance from Uke (Uke is able to stop us), chances are we are not doing the technique correctly.

When we feel resistance with a situation in life, avoiding someone or some thing, resisting the current situation we find ourselves in, we create our own tension, suffering, pain and stress. The mind will quickly build defenses with lies, excuses no matter how small and seemingly innocent. Calling in sick for work to avoid a meeting or deadline you are not ready for. Saying you have another engagement when asked to go to someone's place for a social function and have to maybe meet people you would rather not spend time with. Not answering that call because you are avoiding the person calling you. Protect the image of 'you' that you think others have of you. The Ego.

If we are not ready for the meetings or deadlines, the social events and phone calls... it is most likely because we did not prepare ourselves when we should have. Just like we train for examinations in Aikido, life is one continuous example of learning, preparing, demonstrating. Be honest with yourself first. It is important not to judge yourself to harshly if at all, same for others you are observing. If we are not ready for the exam, we explain to Sensei and you do not take it until you are ready. For meetings, deadlines, social events and phone calls... talk to the person or people concerned from a place without fear in your mind. Accept the situation you have to deal with and work with them to resolve it. Ask for an extended deadline. Push the meeting back so you have time to polish your presentation a bit. Go to the social event and do not worry about what might happen when you get there... you have no way to know for sure and you may be happily surprised. Take the phone calls... you might be surprised how the person you are avoiding is trying to just meet with you to work something out that works for both of you.

It is not always an attack. We just let our minds perceive them as such.

As already said in this thread, by the way of peace and through Aikido, meet this 'mind created' fear of your own, give it your full attention but from a place of peace, not ego, not aggression or defensiveness. Then blend with it, redirect the intention in a way that allows you to be at peace with it. When our minds are focused on the present moment, you just 'flow' with it and things take the course they need to.

Think about every time you find yourself focused on the five or six details of a technique and how the individual parts lack the fluid momentum. Once they all connect and the resistance you initially gave them as individual 'parts of a whole' is removed, you feel the technique as naturally as breathing.

When we realize that our minds create our own stress over possible future events we cannot control now. Past events we cannot change either... We are left with only what we can do right 'now'. Staying present in the moment, focused on 'now', even during an exam, just focus on doing the technique at hand 'now', do not worry about the result, it will take care of itself if you started from the right place.

For me at least I find that here lies the key to having a stress free life as I can find.