Monday, May 5, 2014

"Be the same person in the dark that you are in the light."

It's funny when you are a missionary, because you try your hardest to follow the Spirit and you say what you feel, and you study your heart out, but you never really know how what you said might have effected someone. I made a special prayer to have the Lord help me see the influence and the importance of my companion and I's work here in my area. And I was so grateful for the Lord to answer that prayer over and over. Tender mercies . . . my heart LOVES them!

We are teaching the new member lessons to a new family who was recently baptized. They are going through a lot of trials and so when planning for them the night before, we started talking about the word opposition. And helping them to understand what it is, how it works, and most importantly HOW TO OVERCOME IT!! So, for morning studies, I looked up lots of scriptures and tried to create a vision in my mind of how I wanted the lesson to go.

I realized the difference between the Spirit of contention and the Spirit of God. And really when we believe and have faith in that power of God, we can get through ANYTHING. I think sometimes our minds our dulled to the term gift of the Holy Ghost. Lots of us have it, and are used to it. But a light bulb went off for me saying, "Do you realize that you are promised to have the Holy Ghost to be with you at all times as a CONSTANT COMPANION when you are doing what is right?" It is easy for us to give the adversary more power than he deserves. Giving into our weaknesses and our short comings. Yes, we have them, but we have the tools to overcome them. We need to have confidence in that power. We need to have confidence in our testimonies. Confidence in the atonement, and that through Jesus Christ we can change for the better. He is the only one that can change our hearts. I felt like my Spirit was going through the ultimate pump up speech before the big game.

Can I just say, the real life version was a bit crazy and not what I would have wanted to happen. They had some tough concerns and I was pleading for the Spirit. I gave it all I could. It might not have been what I wished would of happened, but I knew that the Spirit was helping me get out the message.

And even though, I walked out of there more worried then when I walked in. The Lord in his grace, gave me a tender mercy the next day in Sacrament Meeting. One of the counselors in the Bishopric, started off his testimony talking about the opposition he has felt. BOOM! Just what had been on my mind the day earlier. Maybe I wasn't so crazy after all? And then the lady we taught went up and bore her testimony about the opposition we had counseled her on the day earlier. She came up to me and was shocked at how the Spirit worked and it was just what she needed to hear. It really hit me that Heavenly Father knows all, and has a plan. We just need to trust in its power to lead us. Not every time I teach, do I feel good about what happened, or that it was right. But I need to trust that if I am doing all I can to be obedient and read my scriptures and pray for these people, I am being lead to what needs to be said. It was a good lesson for me to learn this week.

This work really is bigger than us all. I can't wrap my mind around it all, but it is exciting. It is real. The restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ really happened, and gosh are we lucky to be a part of the Lord's work. I hope that we are all making an effort to stand as witnesses of Christ. I love the quote from Jabari Parker that President Monson used in his talk in the Priesthood Session that goes along the lines of, "Just be the same person in the dark that you are in the light." By doing that, we can all grow and be the person we always wanted to be. I love you all, and I sure love all the people supporting me and writing me letters. It makes a missionaries life!!!