Einstein's "Theory of Relativity" to be replaced with the theory that "It's Always Something"

It's always raining or we're in a drought. There's always something. And that's what scientist's now say is more relevant then E=mc2.

As one leading expert points out, "Look at the current situation, housing was booming and now people who borrowed way more than they could afford can't pay back. And then, as if that wasn't bad enough, crude oil prices are through the roof. I mean, 'It's Always Something' is a constant. E=mc whatever, sounds like a math thing and well, how reliable is math anyway?"

A guy hanging out in front of a university(or at least a very impressive building) said, "Theories are great! You can get government funding or corporate grant's, do research and stuff, even go on to be a professor and teach you theories to others and best of all you don't even have to be right. Heck, it doesn't even have to make sense!"

In a completely unrelated story, Paris Hilton has found a new way to stay out of the tabloids by hiding from photographers behind the straw in her drink.

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