TUNED IN: They’re naked; the rest doesn’t matter

When you’re randomly flipping through the dial, there are those moments when you will HAVE to stop and watch, if only for a few minutes.

You know, that time when a man with a 100-pound scrotum appears, or a screaming drunk is being handcuffed and thrown in a police car or, awwwwww, puppies.

I’m sure this was part of the thinking behind the reality series Dating Naked when it was first pitched to VH1, although the creators probably threw in phrases like, “Everyone is made vulnerable by their nakedness.”

Or, as they say in the press bumph: “Once everyone has stripped away the artifices of our modern world and revealed their ultimate, honest selves, the results will be surprising.”

Sure.

But at the end of the day, it’s all boobs and dicks. Pixilated boobs and dicks, but still.

Who could NOT stop there when surfing around the dial?

Airing Thursdays at 10 on M3, Dating Naked is exactly as promoted as well as being a pretty conventional dating reality show.

In each episode, three couples go on a “date” on an island resort, meeting cute with their nips to the wind, then going on a suggestive adventure like a naked banana boat ride. Get it? Riding naked on a giant rubber phallus?

I know! Hilarious!

The show makes it a bit more interesting by having the three couples rotate dates, and we watch the fun ensue after some fall more for each other than others.

On a recent episode I caught — just flipping through, of course — the fake boobs of a former stripper named Meg were the extra contestant on the show.

As soon as she and her “cantaloupes” showed up, the other women’s claws came out and a frat boy named Steve started doing rude things to a blow-up dolphin.

“My boobs have magical powers,” said Meg.

Also in the mix were AJ, a pro-wrestler who loves Nickleback, free spirit Liddy who wanted to do cartwheels, pasty good ol’ boy Joe from Kentucky and cool chick Xandra, who told us all through her piercings and eye rolls that she was too awesome for all of this.

The sad sack of the bunch was Joe, spitting and awkwardly laughing when getting rejected by the ladies.

The fun part of Dating Naked is trying to predict who will click and who won’t. At first, artistic type Liddy was smitten by Steve but I was thinking, No way, girl, as his frat boy views came out in his side commentary where he admitted he just tells the ladies what they want to hear.

Enter the Magical Boobs and all was revealed.

“Those big old things were a game-changer,” conceded Steve.

In the grand finale there are no roses handed out — ouch, thorns — but the naked couples awkwardly stand with the clothed host who intones, “I want to congratulate you all on dating naked.”