Category: At The Checkout

The customer has seemed normal and maybe even intelligent throughout the shopping purchase. But then they get to the checkout and as soon as human interaction is required it all falls apart. The checkout operators really are our first line of defense against the stupid customer!

(I work at a popular clothing store where we also offer a brand credit card. We currently have a card-only coupon available to customers. I’m just finishing up a transaction with a customer, who has told me she has a card with us, but doesn’t have it with her. We do look-ups by social security number.)

Me: “Okay, so just enter your social right there and we should be able to pull the account up for you so you can use that coupon!”

(The customer enters her SSN, and the register pops up with a message saying that there is no account under that number. I have the customer try again, and the same message appears.)

Me: “Has it been a while since you used your card? They get shut down after a few months for security reasons.”

Customer: “Oh, yeah, it might have been a few months now.”

Me: “All right, that’s fine! We can get you set up with a new card today if you want, and that way you’ll get the coupon, plus an additional percentage off for opening a card!”

Customer: “Okay… Yeah, let’s do that.”

(We go through the entire process, which includes swiping another credit card for the credit check, and answering a few confidential financial questions. In the end, she’s approved for the card.)

Me: “Awesome! So, you were approved again for the [Brand] Credit Card! In order to get the discount, you have to put this purchase on the new card, is that all right?”

Customer: “What? I didn’t know I was signing up for a credit card. I don’t want it anymore.”

Me: “But you said you had had one before…”

Customer: “I don’t want it!”

(In the end, there was nothing I could really do except give her the phone number to cancel the card in 24 hours. I’m still not quite sure how all the confusion happened.)

(I work at a local dollar store where everything is a dollar or less. A customer, around 18, comes up to the register with a couple items and a VISA gift card that can have $1-$100 put on it. She tells me she would like $50 on it so I ring her up.)

Me: “Your total will be $59.”

Customer: “No, that’s not right I only have eight items and this is the dollar store.”

Me: “Yes, but you put $50 on this gift card.”

Customer: “But this is the dollar store; I should be able to put how ever much I want on that and only pay a dollar.”

(We are a market stall that sells perfumes and cosmetics. We love all of our customers, but a lot of our customers are either bad at math or speak without thinking. We sell a range of smell-like famous brand perfumes, which we sell for £3 each. I see a customer looking at our signs.)

Me: “Hi, can I help you?”

Customer #1: “These perfumes are £3 each, right?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer #1: “You have a sign up that says 3 for £9. That’s dumb as the customer doesn’t save anything buying three! You should remove the sign!”

Me: “I know but the usual going rate is £3.99 or 3 for £10, and some customers ask for 3 for £10!”

(Our restaurant sells milkshakes in four regular flavors and varies an extra one depending on the time of year; peppermint in winter, peach in summer, etc.)

Customer: “And I’d like an eggnog milkshake too.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We don’t carry eggnog milkshakes. We do have our peppermint chocolate chip milkshake, though, as well as chocolate, strawberry, cookies and creme, or vanilla.”

Customer: “No, no, I got an eggnog one here last time. I want it again.”

Me: “I do apologize, but we don’t have that flavor.”

Customer:*not mad, simply very confused* “So… you can’t make me an eggnog milkshake?”

Me: “No, I don’t have the right ingredients to do that.”

Customer: “But I got one last time.”

(I suddenly remember seeing an ad for another restaurant down the road that has eggnog milkshakes. We don’t like to send customers to other shops if we can help it, but I feel bad for her, so I smile and tell her where she can get an eggnog milkshake. She lights up.)

Customer: “Thank you so much! Please forgive an old lady for being forgetful. I’m going to take my food to go then so I can get a milkshake to go with it.”

(After she leaves, the customer behind her comes up to order:)

Next Customer: “Well, that sounded completely gross. I’ll take a peppermint milkshake any day!”