I'm an outgoing guy who can start a conversation with pretty much anyone I meet. I can be wildly sarcastic and think just about everything is funny, and I love to both tell and hear the kind of racy jokes that would make your Grandmother lose her ability to verbalize language if she heard them (not MY grandmother, she thinks I'm wonderful). I love my family dearly, mostly because of how much they remind me of myself, and like to see them on a fairly regular basis. Zombies are easily my favorite popular media fad since the 90s.

I like writing and am actually pretty good at it, although I doubt that's the impression anyone gets reading this profile (Biographies have always been a weakness of mine). I like discussing philosophy, politics, and literature so long as it doesn't reach the point that it derails the night and becomes exhausting. I enjoy physical things like running, yoga, climbing, MMA and am always looking to find new and interesting things to do. I love poker.

What I’m doing with my life

I gave up my dream of being an astronaut after NASA shut down and their staff had to move into cardboard boxes they drew rocket ships on. At the moment I'm working to pay for school while I get a degree in psychology. My resume says I'm working as an "Executive Delivery Associate", which sounds much more impressive than "the only white delivery boy for a Chinese restaurant". I love acting and have recently been working in some indie films. I'm also getting certified as a personal trainer since god knows I'm not gonna make money as a therapist until I get two more degrees and a private practice, so I decided in the interim I'll train fat people to be in better shape by making them self-conscious until they run faster.

I’m really good at

Writing - all kinds of stuff from poetry and songs to short stories, screenplays, and internet summaries of my personality in under 1000 words. I like to perform slam poetry at open mics and I'm getting back into acting, physical fitness is fun, yoga is relaxing, running is invigorating, embarrassing myself dancing is a blast, climbing is awesome and I should do it more, and being a smartass gets me in trouble.

The first things people usually notice about me

My lazy eye and badass pirate peg leg.

Also apparently I'm the spitting image of three different actors, none of whom look anything alike. Message me if you can figure out who.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Flowers for Algernon, everything Calvin & Hobbes, Brave New World, Kite Runner, A Song of Ice and Fire, The Human Stain, Sandman by Neil Gaiman (Read it), World War Z, 1984, The Walking Dead (The show is similarly awesome to the books)

Forgetting Sarah Marshall, The Dark Knight, (500) Days of Summer, Schindler's List, The Usual Suspects, Pulp Fiction (Me and every other film junkie on the planet), Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Honestly I like all sorts of music and I love discovering new bands that blow my mind.

The six things I could never do without

Listing things on the internetGas station coffee.Overly friendly conversations with strangers.ThunderstormsTangential trains of thought.Anything that's bad for me

I spend a lot of time thinking about

Delving into the unexplored depths of the human psyche; in depth analysis of modern entertainment; whether humanity is going to find a viable method of escaping the planet before it goes mad max within the next hundred years (Stephen Hawking said it, and he's a fairly bright fellow), and the fact that we probably won't and what is the ideal way for me to achieve power and glory in the inevitable chaos.

On a typical Friday night I am

Working until 10 for money I can immediately use to go out and pay for overpriced alcohol.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit

I once drove through a deer in my monstrous SUV on the highway, then when a cop showed up he told me not to worry about it because I'd had the right of way.

You should message me if

You can make me laugh. You don't place much stake in being conventional. You're intelligent, creative and passionate.