And almost all ways of addressing emotions - whether mainstream or alternative - focus entirely on changing your perspective, essentially trying to “reprogram” the emotions with the mind.

Even if that were effective (which it’s usually not!), it still treats the emotions themselves as the problem.

This is no different than prescribing drugs to make symptoms go away. It does nothing to actually address why you’re feeling what you’re feeling.

They may give relief in the moment, but nothing more - because they ignore (or simply fail to understand) how deeply emotions are rooted in our instincts, intuition, and everyday responses to life.

In contrast, I believe that there is an intelligence behind your emotions – that they’re doing what they’re doing for a reason, and that reason deserves looking into.

This is not yet another form of spiritual bypass.

I do not claim to provide a miracle cure that can make you feel better in an instant. Nor do I want to!

Many things that claim to provide healing are in fact nothing more than forms of spiritual bypass: ways to get back to feeling good without having to truly change anything. Even though they are cloaked in the guise of healing, the true purpose of spiritual bypass is avoiding any emotions other than the fun ones: happiness and joy.

But if we can’t (or won’t) feel it, we can’t heal it. True emotional healing requires true intimacy with ourselves, and deep engagement with even our most uncomfortable feelings.

I learned this lesson well in my 6 years of my shamanic training. My shamanic training required me to have a diligent practice of emotional self-healing, by connecting with the wounded parts of myself and intimately engaging with them in order to heal the past wounds at their root.

Even though there is a shamanic element to this practice, it is not a metaphysical technique.

It works entirely with our emotional and physical wisdom bodies and our intuitive inner landscape. Once we’ve connected to the part of ourselves that needs attention, we track the feelings back to the original unresolved memory that created it, so that we can bring resolution to that memory and reclaim the aspect of ourselves that was stuck in that moment in time.

Working with my emotions in this way caused my stuck patterns to completely shift.

I learned what true transformation feels like. Looking back on the person I was before, I can barely recognize myself!

I have seen the same level of transformation occur in others who have utilized these same tools. And yet almost everywhere else I look, I see practitioners promising transformation while only delivering temporary relief. At best!

This is not yet another attempt to banish “negative” emotions.

Most approaches to emotional healing rely on logicking our way out of what we feel. They operate from the premise that the mind is superior to the emotions, and can control them - if we just have enough willpower.

While the mind is a valuable tool, I do not believe it can solve everything. In fact, when it comes to true emotional healing, going up into your head will block the whole process.

Dissociating from our feelings and bodies makes it impossible to connect to what needs healing within us, and going into "fix-it" mode to avoid the pain won't work.

I have much personal experience with disconnecting from my emotions by going up in my head (click here to read my story), so please believe me when I tell you that it just doesn’t work.

Rather than trying to change how I felt by thinking a certain way, I learned that true emotional transformation requires going into my feelings and discovering why I’m feeling that way, and then taking the action that is required to honor that feeling.

By training and licensing in Dynamic Emotional Integration® (DEI), a research-based model of 17 emotions, I discovered ways to feel and act on my emotions that respected the needs of others as well as myself - actions that I could feel good about, and that allowed my emotions to resolve.

DEI taught me that there is an intelligence behind your emotions – that they’re doing what they’re doing to help you and protect you - even when it feels like the exact opposite is true.

This is not yet another form of therapy.

While some therapeutic modalities are based in research like DEI, none of them have a comprehensive understanding of what each emotion does.

Because of this, none of them actually understand the emotions they are trying to resolve, or work with the emotions to create change.

They either focus on retraining the body and brain to no longer have that emotional response (as if the emotion is something to simply get rid of), or they attempt to heal the past in ineffective ways, like endless talking.

By providing clear ways to work with the emotions instead of struggling against them, DEI consulting creates rapid shifts and changes in your emotional life.

As a DEI client, you'll never need to attend weekly sessions for months (or even years), like is needed with most forms of therapy.

Not only will you be able to get on with your life more quickly, but your bank account will thank you too!

And finally, no form of therapy looks for the solution within your own emotions, as DEI does. My value as a practitioner lies in connecting your with your own innate wisdom, and helping you to make sense of the mess of your overwhelming and powerful feelings.

All of my experience and training has taught me that:

Your emotions are meant to be your allies, working for you instead of against you. Achieving that is not always easy, but I know it is possible!

The only way to truly heal emotionally is to work with your emotions. The only way out is through, and the healing of emotions requires actually feeling them.

Transforming emotional patterns should not take years to achieve. Many have experienced efficient and effective emotional transformation through these emotional skills, and so can you.

But don't take my word for it; try it for yourself!

Come on over to my blog and learn what your emotions are trying to do, and why they can go haywire. There I share practical strategies for getting out of the stuck patterns that aren't working for you, and information to help you find more ease and joy in your heart.

If you like what you read there, sign up for my email newsletter and get each new article delivered straight to your inbox. Plus, you’ll receive a special bonus to help you de-stress and manage one of the most challenging (and yet important!) emotions we regularly feel.

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