Behind the Garden Gate

Friday, July 12, 2013

Growing a Scene By Layla Chase

originally published in the Wild Rose Press Greenhouse

Seeds grow into what they will eventually be-a head of lettuce, a pod of peas, a daisy or a rose- through the addition of essential elements like sunshine, water, nutrients from the soil. The same is true for how you develop a scene. Start with the basic action. Add essential elements like setting, dialogue, subtext.

Watch the scene grow

The man dropped an envelope on the desk.

"That's it?" She gripped the arm of the chair.

"This is all I could get."

"We'll make it stretch."

Now add setting details

The tall man scuffed his boots across the wooden floor and dropped a thin envelope on the weathered desk.

"That's it?" She gripped the arm of the wooden chair until her fingers ached.

He pulled off his hat and circled it on his fingers. "This is all I could get."

She swallowed hard and thought of the numbers in the ledger book. "We'll make it stretch."

Flesh out the dialogue

The tall man scuffed his boots across the wooden floor and dropped a thin envelope on the weathered desk.
"The deal's done."

"That's it?" She gripped the arm of the wooden chair until her fingers ached. "Was there a problem?"

"Too many herds being sold today." His boots scraped the planks. He pulled off his hat and circled it on his fingers. "This is all I could get."

She swallowed hard and thought of the long column of numbers in the ledger book. "We'll make it stretch. We've done it before."

Deepen the point of view with internal thoughts

The tall man hesitated in the doorway then scuffed his boots across the wooden floor and dropped a thin envelope on the weathered desk. "The deal's done."

The simple fact her foreman hesitated told the story. Could she handle what he'd say? "That's it?" She gripped the arm of the wooden chair until her fingers ached. Surely, more would be coming. "Was there a problem?"

"Too many herds being sold today." His boots scraped the planks. He pulled off his hat and circled it on his fingers before lifting his head to meet her gaze. "This is all I could get."

She swallowed hard and thought of the long column of numbers in the ledger book. The ones that weighed too heavily in the red. "We'll make it stretch. We've done it before."

The last section still has only four sentences but can't you see these two people interacting, feel the tension in the room? You may have noticed that I still haven't committed this scene to a particular era-could be contemporary or historical. But that's yet another layer...