The world celebrated New Year’s a few weeks back. But 90210 doesn’t care what silly calendars say. Tonight’s first new episode of 2012, “Should Old Acquaintance Be Forgot,” saw the gang reuniting after some interesting winter vacations—trips to Paris and New Guinea, party-planning internships, and lots of hospital visits. And boy oh boy, 90210 did not disappoint as our zip code buddies attempted to get a fresh start on the New-ish Year. Except, it’s not easy leaving last year’s drama behind.

sNOw More: Naomi is still rocking her party-planning internship under Rachel’s guidance, and apparently has progressed beyond making Xerox copies to snapping orders on the phone. She spent her break working hard to put Austin’s supposed cheating ways with Holly behind her. I have to agree with Dixon on this one—Austin claims that Holly came onto him, but seriously, how hard is it to push a 90 lb girl off of you? Anyways, you can tell that despite talking a big game, Naomi is still hurt. What’s a girl to do? Get that bikini wax and plan to sleep with a hot sailor at the Pasadena Debutante Snow Ball that Rachel tasks her to plan. In true Naomi fashion, she made sure the party was off to a good start and then grabbed herself a sailor. Too bad they were caught half naked when the curtain came up on the stage. I have to say, this storyline was a snoozefest. I expect more intrigue from the likes of Naomi, but instead we get the same antics every week: Naomi dresses up at costume events, has an embarrassing mishap with a dude, and then has a cathartic emotional response. But it seems like we may be in for some changes, as she officially breaks things off with Austin and declares she is ready to be her own independent woman. Time will tell if Naomi is ‘woman, hear her roar.’

The Fast and the Furious: Annie and Dixon arrive home from their winter vacay in Paris, and they know how to make an entrance at the airport. With her new money, Annie looks like a high-class hooker (oh wait, she is) and Dixon looks like a spy (or a mime, according to Austin). Both are eager to get back to loved ones—Dixon heads straight for Adrianna’s sweet music and Annie wants to make amends for blowing town on the injured Liam. As you may recall, Liam was admiring his own billboard ad while riding his bike when a car hit him before the holidays. And the woman who hit him pretended to be the passerby hero rather than take the blame. Annie is in for a shock when Liam rejects her attempts at reunification because he has quickly moved on the mysterious Vanessa—his hit-n-run “hero.” You know they are serious because they are already enjoying pudding snacks together and doing crossword puzzles. Just when Liam is about to exemplify the first signs of responsible adulthood on this show by going through some bills, crazy Vanessa convinces him to live life to the fullest and do some dangerous activities fresh out of the hospital. Meanwhile, to make up for the crappy Paris souvenir she bought him (ummm an Eifel Tower paper weight….really?), Annie has Liam’s damaged motorcycle restored. Her ‘kind’ act also reveals some interesting knowledge—the car that hit Liam was actually maroon, not black like Vanessa told police, and it just so happens that Vanessa’s car is maroon. Annie tries to expose Vanessa but for once realizes she is being a brat, so she wishes Liam happiness and decides to leave Cali and pursue Carnegie Mellon (ha, remember that!). When dodo brain gets to the airport she realizes that she grabbed the wrong purse at her own clearance-bin themed New Year’s party and actually has Vanessa’s purse. Turns out that Vanessa goes by a lot of names, as evidenced by multiple fake IDs in her wallet. Wow, Liam really knows how to pick the smart ladies—Annie is so dumb she doesn’t bother looking at her purse before MOVING ACROSS THE COUNTRY and hit-and-run “Vanessa” keeps a dozen fake IDs in her wallet at all times.

K-Fed Up: Dixon—channeling the Kevin Federline look—gets fed up when the sleaze-bag club owner where he and Ade are set to perform spends more time hitting on Ade than promoting their music. Overall, I could care less about this storyline, but it was amusing to see Dixon punch the guy out and Adrianna have a hissy fit about Dixon not trusting her. But the real highlight of this story line came in a little sibling conversation in which Dixon asks his sis Annie for some advice about the situation with his girlfriend and the club owner: “would you ever let a guy flirt with you just for the sake of a job?” Ummm HELLO? Your sister was a prostitute (OK, fine, “paid escort” who ended up sleeping with the guy) all last semester! I guess those A.D.H.D. meds really did mess with Dixon’s mind.

Blue Ivy: This may be the only blog post on the great wide Internet that can say ‘Blue Ivy’ in a situation that does not involve Beyonce’s baby and the real-life 90210-esque hospital diva drama currently unfolding. Nope—in this case Blue Ivy refers to our sullen surfer gal who spent her winter break on a photography safari in New Guinea trying to mend her broken heart. Now that Ivy is a young divorcee because Raj didn’t want to make her put her dreams on hold when his cancer secretly returned, she seeks solace in the arms of photographer Nick. Apparently the two hit it off on their trip (shocker) and now Ivy has real feelings for him. Hmmmm how long before dying Raj shows up again to put Ivy’s new love to the test?

Blast from the Past: Tonight we finally saw resolution (we think) on the whole ‘Navid tries to be an undercover cop to get his criminal uncle behind bars’ story line that has truly plagued this season. Super young Detective Kat fears that Navid is about to do something very stupid (ha! where have you been this whole time) and finally tells Silver the truth about who she is and Navid’s cooperation with the cops. Thank you—it’s about time. Silver still cares about Navid and wants to make sure he gets the help he needs, so she somehow tracks down his father—the same child pornographer who fled the country—and fills him in on what his son has had to do lately. The father finally steps up to receive his punishment, and take Uncle Amal down with him. Just because Navid can finally get back to normal life, that doesn’t mean Silver is ready to jump back into their relationship. She is happy with grad student Greg—the recently divorced single dad. They are so solid that he wants Silver to meet his little daughter…and SURPRISE TWIST! His little daughter is Ade’s biological daughter that she gave up for adoption back in the first season!

This recap would not be complete without three more general comments from yours truly. First, at ten minutes into the episode I still couldn’t figure out what was happening with French Annie’s hairstyle…Was it folded under? Were birds nesting in there? Second, I had no clue that teenagers today even knew what postcards were thanks to iPhones and texting, so color me surprised that Holly sent her mom, Rachel, a postcard from Cabo. Third, let’s all thank tonight’s sponsor, State Farm, for the most blatantly awkward example of product placement I have ever witnessed. But hey, this is 90210—go big or go home.