In the battle of the game’s best jerseys, it’s funny that old man Andre Miller is using the same tactics to embarrass people in the NBA that the old, fat dude with the nasty back sweat is using to bust your ass at a local YMCA. Golden State/Denver was supposed to be crazy — uptempo and out of control — and instead, their Game 1 developed into a back-n-forth mud bath. The Nuggets pulled it out by two, getting a game-winning circus layup from Miller, who scored 28 points off the pine in the W, 18 of them in the final frame. Miller, who’s so old he probably voted for Jimmy Carter, typified this one. It was ugly, boring and entirely not what we expected. We thought we’d see Stephen Curry (19 points, nine assists) splashing from 30 feet, the Nuggets running harder than a Jamaican sprint team, and a blood-thirsty crowd. Instead, it was so awful that even one of the worst NBA players ever thought it sucked. …

David Lee went down early in the fourth quarter with one of those injuries that you just know is gonna be bad. He said he heard a pop. We thought we heard the Warriors’ season being flushed down the toilet. It’s being diagnosed as a strained right hip flexor, and in the best case scenario, Lee is out for 48 hours. There’s also a good chance that we won’t see him again this season.

There were a few positives to this one though. First, thanks to @ramonashelburne, we confirmed that Wilson Chandler (who had 12 boards in the first half alone) is a very legit sneakerhead. He was supergluing an old pair of Air Raids that Nike doesn’t make anymore during the pregame. That’s love. Then there was Andre Iguodala‘s fashion choice, which still didn’t help him score at all (eight points). …

Andre Iguodala (photo. @mindofai9)

The Clippers 112-91 Game 1 win over Memphis was over long before Chris Paul dropped a pull-up triple into Memphis’ heart with just over two minutes to go. It didn’t really matter that CP3 had 23 points or that the Clips’ guards pulled down the pants of the Grizzlies’ guards and spanked them. It didn’t matter that L.A. had three bench players score in double-figures, or that they played a super small lineup in the fourth quarter (Paul, Bledsoe and Billups) that turned this one in an inevitability. This one came down to one stat: rebounds. The Clippers won that battle, 47-23, in one of the ultimate “wait… what?” stats you’ll see throughout the entire postseason. … Keep reading to hear why Avery Johnson should be pissed right now…