November 18th, 2004

GENEVA, Switzerland - After an eighteen-month deliberation, a World Trade Organization (WTO) panel ruled today that the United States has achieved a position of de-facto monopoly in military force that is "inconsistent with the base provisions of the Marrakech round and a barrier to trade in similar services by other states". In a move widely regarded as placatory, the panel "recommended" (rather than ruling) that the US break up its vast military into several independent entities, and also allow "other states", understood to mean Europeans, to compete for provision of military intimidation in its core markets.

United States president and CEO George W. Bush said in a press conference shortly after the WTO announcement: "We are saddened and surprised at the panel's findings. Our organisation has been a dynamic, growing, successful provider of military intimidation and violent suppression since 1912. We have grown with the market, and the market has grown with us, from a fragmented and often stagnant sector of the regional economy to a vibrant, trillion dollar a year global marketplace. We've done nothing wrong, and we'll work with the WTO to clear the issue."