Dear Betty, I'm a widow for 12 years now. Do you think God wants us women to be lonely because there are so many widows in this world?

A:

Let's take your question in two parts. The first part tells me you have been a widow for 12 years. My heart goes out to you. This is no doubt a very difficult burden to bear. I don't know first hand, but my mother is a widow and it has forever changed her life as she knew it. It is not strange or unusual to feel sad and incomplete. God Himself said it was not good for man to be alone. Also, unfortunately it is not unusual to be a widow. There are an awful lot around. Some seem to adjust easier than others. I'm not sure what their secret is, because I believe I myself would find it very difficult. But Abraham Lincoln once said, "It seems we are about as happy as we make up our mind to be."

The other part of your question asks if God wants women to be lonely, because there are so many widows in the world. I suppose one might question this if she were tempted to believed that God is the One responsible for making her a widow. One could also wonder if God wants handicapped people to struggle with life, because there are so many in the world. How does God feel about the widows? Why not do a word search at www.blueletterbible.org and enter the word "widow" and "widows" and see the many references. To the society in general He lays the burden of watching out for them and treating them with kindness. To the widow herself He admonishes her to behave wisely and to be godly. There are many Bible stories about widows, and Jesus Himself used them as illustrations and examples.

The pilgrim Christian on his way to the Celestial City was thrown into Doubting Castle by the Giant Despair, but he got out by using the key of faith and all prayer. The key became shinier with use and grew or shrank according to the immediate need. I am sure you find yourself in and out of that stronghold many times. The important thing is, once you are out, get yourself back on the road and keep trucking. God bless.

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