The Texas Cockroach is a satirical newspaper from the mythical small town of LaCucaracha, Texas. In LaCucaracha, football is king, and citizens have a choice of 137 churches. The Texas Cockroach parodies the unique culture, lifestyle and politics found nowhere else but Texas. Pour yourself a tall glass of iced tea, sit back, and take a virtual stroll through the streets of LaCucaracha. God Bless Texas.

Note: This is an mySA.com City Brights Blog. These blogs are not written or edited by mySA or the San Antonio Express-News. The authors are solely responsible for the content.

Citing “places to go, people to see, and things to do,” God gave Gov. Rick Perry a rather terse “no” after Perry spoke at this weekend’s Christian rally, “The Response.” Some 30,000 Christians gathered at Houston’s Reliant Stadium to pray for the economy, jobs and the country. Gov. Perry had a brief meeting with God […]
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Dear Texas Cockroach, I’m writing this to you from summer camp because my parents are not responding to my texts, calls, emails or letters that plead with them to come and save me from this totally random place. Maybe that evil camp director, Ms. Banks, is intercepting all my communications. ANYWAY, hopefully, my parents will […]
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This week severe storms forced Governor Rick Perry’s plane to be rerouted and make a rare stop in the state of Texas. During the layover, the Governor refused to speak to the press about any issues other than a possible presidential run, which he then refused to speak about. A custodian at the airport’s Big […]
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In a surprise move, House Republicans accused Rep. Anthony Weiner of lying about manufacturing his entire sexting scandal. “We believe he’s a liar – he’s lying about the size of his package in that widely publicized photo,” said Speaker of the House, Boehner. “At first, he was telling the truth by repeatedly denying sending lewd […]
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Reacting swiftly to Tennessee’s recent passage of a bill that bans discussion of any sexual orientation other than heterosexuality in elementary schools across the state, the Texas senate passed a law actually requiring elementary schools in Texas to teach a “totally gay” unit once per semester. The measure was brought to the fore by Sen. […]
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In a rare public admonition to favored daughter Laura Ehlers, septuagenarian mother, grandmother and former connoisseur of fine foods, Josephine Harper, dismissed talk of a well-prepared meal in favor of a discussion about the “great portion of food” she received at a recent visit to the local Cracker Barrel restaurant. The incident, witnessed by Ehlers’s […]
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In response to the Texas House’s approval of 85 miles per hour speed limits on selected sections of highways in Texas, auto safety and educational video industry spokesperson Glen Keetch excitedly told members of the Texas Department of Transportation that his industry was “ecstatic about the new speed limit.” After confirming that a decent driving […]
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The LaCucaracha city council, in cooperation with all 137 local churches, recently began handing out free “Pray for Rain” bumper stickers in an effort to overcome LaCucaracha’s current drought (the fourth longest on record). The stickers are available at all local churches, as well as the courthouse and post office. These bumper stickers were graciously […]
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