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Nuggets of Wisdom

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

2014 Midterm Election Wrap-Up

The midterms are finally done and over with! No more commercial breaks that are nothing more than negative attack ads. No more opening mailboxes crammed with political fliers. No more tires being slashed over cars having the wrong bumper political stickers, or houses being vandalized for having the wrong campaign sign in their front yard. Finally, after weeks upon months of political propaganda, the country can finally return to normal—at least, until the presidential election two years from now.

Anyway, with all of that madness out of the way, here are the highlights from this election:

Sadly, for my state, Adrian Wyllie did not win the Florida governor’s race (though he did receive a decent amount of votes, and he has since taken his loss humbly) which means we’re stuck with another four years under the rule of Emperor Baldy Bald—er, I mean Rick Scott. (Though, to Scott’s credit, he doesn’t have an army of ninjas going around forcibly shaving people!)

Also sadly, for my state, Amendment 2, which would have legalized medical marijuana, failed to pass. Somehow, I’m not surprised, what with the media pumping scare ads 24/7 claiming that the bill would have allowed felons and drug dealers to count as medical caregivers—which it wouldn’t have!

On a more positive note, Oregon, Alaska, and Washington D.C. have legalized recreational marijuana. The good news is that this now makes four states where Mary Jane is legal. The bad news is that the green stuff is still illegal on the federal level, which makes its legality on the state level moot.

Wendy Davis lost the Texas gubernatorial race to Greg Abbott. You mean to tell me that you can’t win a major political race on a single issue, especially if it’s an irrelevant Democrat pet issue like the manufactured “War on Women”? Huh. Go Figure!

Mia Love becomes the first black female elected to the Senate, and Elise Stefanik becomes the youngest woman ever elected to Congress. The bitter sweet irony is that these two women who made these milestones in diversity were Republicans. Ha! Suck on that, Dems! You’re not the party of diversity after all!