Brother & Sister

Everyone has their own triggers and if they are pushed hard enough they can make you explode negatively or positively. When you pushed a button something happens, maybe the floodgates of emotion is thrown out. These hot buttons is the perfect tool to get people trust or get on their nerve. A jackass sure did the opposite to get what they want.

In handling these hot buttons, you must understand your hot buttons first as "Never has a man who has bent himself been able to make other straight.” To understand it you must meet the Quadruple 'T's.

The first T is Taaruf (knowing), through our experience we met various kind of people with different attitude even the guys who kept intimidating us is worth knowing as through them we can perfectly knew what our hot buttons are. That is why first impression is the best way to know a person & first step before understand them.

The second T is Tafahum (Understand), only few try to understand others to resolve any conflict just because they think there are above all. For example, an acquaintance of us usually do his job less than ours, does not do overtime but always get away from problems & get praised by the boss. So we called him SLACKER! But the truth is, it is totally wrong to compare ourselves with others. The fact is all his work is actually within requirements and desired by the boss compared to us as we tried to go beyond just because we are perfectionist or disliked our job & try to make up the fact by comparing others to make us happier.Try to understand others even a little can make a big different. Keep pressing their hot buttons positively such as praising them, ask about their family or talk any topic interest them depending on their hot buttons, from there you can get what you want & happier without conflict. Being different does not mean you cannot fit with others, it is the beautiful thing being human.

The third T is Ta'awun (trust), by understand their feelings & needs, we simply can get their trust it is what makes human& the funny thing is we also start to trust them. Through trust we are bonded but we must continue to understand them as times past by people changed this also includes their needs.

The last T is Takaful, as we knew what they want to keep them going & resolve any conflict we start to fulfill each other needs & it is not hard to ask for any help from them now but if a person continuously giving as a headache & it is too hard to ask any help it means he does not trust us yet.

"O you who have believed,
let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may
be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women;
perhaps they may be better than them. And do not insult one
another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames.
Wretched is the name of disobedience after [one's] faith. And
whoever does not repent - then it is those who are the
wrongdoers." (49:11)