Betas, and NFs speciffically, what is your experience with Si?

Titleeeee.
I'm very often typed as Beta NF (also my current typing) though one thing pecks my interest, and that is Si. It very often feels like I downplay Si for the sake of me fitting as a Beta NF more, which is not a very nice thing. It's like my Si is stronger than I make it out to be, however I know that it's not too high-dimensional since I don't have confidence in the states that i experience, nor manipulating them for my and others' wellbeing.

An example would be this: when I'm gone from my home for long, when I do come back, I can sense this *smell*. Not sure how to describe it, but it smells like *home*, a smell that can only be felt here. I also notice that every residence has a distinctive smell.

lol I have a strong sense of smell... not sure how much that's related to Si.

Well Si is my role function, so I do it reasonably well but it's still kind of uncomfortable. When I have to make 'people comfortable/harmonious' by like asking them if they want a glass of water or something.... I can do it, but it still feels like an ESE or SEI is much more natural with it. Definitely feels mediocre and 2 dimensional-ish.

Your role function is your supervisor's Polr, which is interesting. Kinda like they can sense how you are faking it because it's not pushing their buttons or something? Like how it's all an act, because the real thing hurts so much more than that.

I am not comfortable with most bodily sensations, even pleasant ones, for very long. Many are just hormonal and pass but still. I am repelled by most tender touches or people trying to give me a massage that is not for medical reasons (like when I pulled my neck muscles and was in pain for weeks that was fine to have a pro do it). I know an EIE who completely dismisses anything Si related and for some weird reason liked to be tazed. It helps he was born without a sense of smell. He was shocked when I told him I didn't want to be around him anymore because he smelled different to me after awhile and it was making me sick to my stomach. I knew it was because I had lost my feelings for him. That did not go over well at all but he forced me to tell him what was wrong. I kept moving away from him, usually across the room and could still smell him. Even though he showered. He asked others to confirm what I said about his smell and they didn't pick up on it. He was not mating material. It was just a weird thing and I haven't really had that experience so strongly before him. I did notice when losing feelings for others little things would bother me about them too but usually not their smell. Just habits.

I tend to feel out of control and don't know what to do with it. I am responsive to a very few vibrations/frequencies/tones of voice. They are deeper. Like Tibetans monks chanting "Om". I like a lot more bass maybe but not too much. Still I feel I can't let myself completely relax into those pleasant sensations like others can. I have had people try to help me but it makes me more tense.'

A few people have been able to relax me enough to give into bodily sensations but I am often resistant. I am super sensitive to pain and rarely notice when I have to eat. In fact I don't eat until I am reminded most of the time because I prefer being in my own world doing my own thing. I have gone a whole day without drinking liquids. My doctor said I had long term dehydration which I have been trying to fix by setting reminders to drink a glass of water. I can sit in a lotus or semi lotus position for long periods of time and only know I am stiff when I stand up hours later.

If I meditate it is a little better and I can kind of melt into it for a little while. If someone physically touches me it breaks the spell. It is hard to explain. I have synesthesia so my Si (if responsible for it) is not wired right and signals get crossed. I have a strong sense of smell but my eyesight is not great without contacts or glasses. It is not awful according to my eye doctor but to me I swear I can't see anything in front of me without them. He said this should not be the case. Perhaps I blur my own vision in some way in order to focus on my third eye vision. I have been told I have a wolf like sense of smell. I pick up things others don't until I point it out. Maybe I have been around so many people who do not value Si that it just wasn't even a problem until I was around Si valuers who tried to put their icky hands on me. They were being pervy about it so that influenced my response. I was not interested in their advances.

Edit: since I was asked, I will clarify. I rented a room from a ESE and her EII bf. She was a very, um, open and kind of wacky person. A delta ST rented another room. He would always tell me I needed a massage because I do tend to sleep in odd positions and wake up with a sore neck or back. I don't start out in weird positions. One day I allowed him to try and "fix" my neck and the next thing I knew I was fighting him off me and literally had to hit him to keep him from putting his hand down my shirt. He knew I was serious and stopped. Apparently the ESE chick didn't think it was a big deal after I told her and she confronted him (I don't know what he told her happened) and let him stay (he was paying her a lot). I ended up moving out for that and other reasons. I didn't even have to live there so it wasn't a big deal to move but that whole experience living with a bunch of Si valuers was weird. Plus she gave my stuff away to people she thought needed it more or let people go through my stuff when I wasn't there. The delta ST guy was always in the room with the ESE when her bf wasn't around and they were giving each other massages. :/

Hmmm, interesting, everyone. Yeah, so far, from what I can see, my Si is surely not as weak as some people who have replied on here. I have a sleeping schedule that I maintain in order to be healthy, and have three meals a day plus a few snacks thrown in there. I am always aware of what my body needs, though my predictions aren't accurate which often sends me into panic-mode ('Head hurts? It's surely a brain tumour'). I'm also very squeamish when it comes to sensations in my own body, although taking shots never really 'hurt' me- I did have a fear of needles as a kid, but it was an irrelevant fear, it passed after my first shot. I also hate certains sensations and I'm pretty picky about them (I have a skin treatment which requires me to use moisturizing masks and all sorts of crap, which i absolutely HATE how it feels on my face, it's cold, mushy and feels gross overall)

Fwiw, I can get really squeamish over certain body stuff too. An acquaintance of mine was once going into detail about her mothers ovarian cancer scare and went into graphic detail about her mom's ovarian cysts bursting, and I could feel my whole body getting really hot and weak and I had to cut her off and excuse myself from the conversation and go outside to get some fresh air because I felt like I was going to faint, lol.

That's really strange, but when I watch scenes depicting gore in animation or movies, even writing, I can handle it pretty well. Granted, not too much, or I'll most likely react the same way you did. When it's too much, I imagine my very own body suffering from what's being described. I would've been a horrible doctor.

That sounds normal run of the mill Si. Get into predictive bodily states of others and affecting them with your agency and you'll get into Si ego territory.

You're probably just an IEI - Fe

Projection is ordinary. Person A projects at person B, hoping tovalidate something about person A by the response of person B. However, person B, not wanting to be an obejct of someone elses ego and guarding against existential terror constructs a personality which protects his ego and maintain a certain sense of a robust and real self that is different and separate from person A. Sadly, this robust and real self, cut off by defenses of character from the rest of the world, is quite vulnerable and fragile given that it is imaginary and propped up through external feed back. Person B is dimly aware of this and defends against it all the more, even desperately projecting his anxieties back onto person A, with the hope of shoring up his ego with salubrious validation. All of this happens without A or B acknowledging it, of course. Because to face up to it consciously is shocking, in that this is all anybody is doing or can do and it seems absurd when you realize how pathetic it is.

In terms of being medical doctor. Ha. I should be replaced by computer.

I was thinking of becoming hospital chemist (lots of medicine studies on top chemistry MSc) but that itself means lots of admin work... I can see myself in that kind of place where I could work/design for detecting stuff with instruments.

Penny could be valuing not sure.

yeah, understanding impressions is also important step. I don't get it that well.

yeah uhhhhh Im easily over stimiliated and very aware of my senses only when it gets to me, becomes overwhelming. I do have some kind of ..Si agenda? but mostly when I feel like its expected of me? But I have my favorite textures and favorite colors and what the fuck is Si again lol? If it's about "aesthetics" and "comforts" i mean.. I thought I was a SEI last year just because I was into that stuff, and I will really treat like certain things are objects of a museum and maybe add it to my own museum that is my taste but thats in my own pacing, on my own time, and it's something to study and often time not to actually practice. As for taking care of myself, I mean... I never know when I'm actually hungry until I actually start eating and then I become starving. Usually wanting a snack is what makes me think "oh yknow what I might actually be hungry" but I dont even remember that mostly. Im trying to practice pampering myself so I can involve self care more, but even routines like shaving and tweezing is well... not apart of my routine. I do it when I think "hm why do I feel like I look disturbing? just... God am I truly that disturbing what is that OH" but I also have a chronic pain disease since birth SO ... I am Very Aware of my body sensations and I know what all the different pains mean and what I need. usually I can tell people what they need with what kind of headache they have... Im aware of triggers and when Im uncomfortable, because at the end of the day I tend to indulge in my comforts.

What was i saying again (I may be high I cant remember)

I have performed the necessary butchery. Here is the bleeding corpse.

HENRY JAMES, AFTER A REQUEST BY THE TIMES LITERARY SUPPLEMENT TO CUT THREE LINES FROM A 5,000 WORD ARTICLE

I just read an article about males not being able to get erections when they want to if their estrogen is not high enough and how we forget estrogen is a sex hormone for men. There are different reasons for not being able to smell well, but I wonder how many of them are correlated with estrogen levels in a person and if we could use not being able to smell as a signal to test people's estrogen (because if it gets horribly low, maybe their bones and hearts could be harmed, etc)

Oh, I agree. As long as people's bones and hearts aren't affected by imbalances, I think people put an insane amount of pressure on themselves for no reason. It's weird how much people shame themselves about neurotransmitters, etc.

well, a few of my friends wish they could just have sex and not worry with their partner about pregnancy...

I could see me having Si HA. I'm naturally not that in touch with my body because I'm so caught up in my emotions and worries and I love when I meet someone sensual and someone whose just able to relax and calm me down Of course they have to be very interesting besides that and share my interests but yeah. It's like the icing on the cake

My Si is clumsy lol. People who donít know me very well think Iím neat and prim but thatís all a well crafted lie created by shirts and pants Iíve already worn maybe three times in 2 weeks without washing (I just keep wearing it if thereís no stains and smell). It takes forever to push myself to do chores and my room is pretty much chaos. I like looking nice but the way I go about it is kind of lazy, like... man I wish I had the patience to do contour and cute winged eyeliner but I just donít so I end up slapping on whatever drugstore makeup brands I have laying around lmao

I only exercise when I feel myself getting stagnant and I try to eat healthy cuz I have an awful immune system but I donít like complex dishes so my diet consists mostly of eggs, steamed veggies, and rice... and whatever fruit I decide to buy that week. Cream cheese and bagels are a staple. So is cereal..... Just anything easy tbh lol. Iíd rather spend my time doing other things than taking care of myself as bad as that sounds. I mean, at least I still look cute so whatever

I canít stand seeing mold or dirt tho, that shits nasty and Iím pretty sensitive to smells as well. My LIE uncle lives like a fuckin troglodyte and idk how he does it tbh cuz there is literally phlegm from him spitting rimmed all over his bathroom sink and his shower is slimy as fuck, like GROSS. I thought my Si was bad but jfc lol. Also whats interesting to note between our supervision relationship is while Iím better at Si stuff than he is, he refuses to listen to any of the advice I give him regarding to it cuz I ďlive like a single man with no direction in lifeĒ :))

I don't see Si as being the perception of affinity for qualities of things, but the internal management of one's response to those qualities. A Si lead will have knowledge of what will make him more comfortable, but will also be able to withstand an inordinate amount of discomfort by way of tempering their response or adapting their behavior to the offending thing; consider the jolly sheet-metal worker. They're often described as hedonistic, but consider what actual hedonism is; the ability to find enjoyment in little. Noticing things in the environment is just perception, there's nothing much else to say about it.

I can't imagine there being too much evolutionary advantage to sitting around stroking oneself all day, so it's strange to me that it's taken for granted that Si leads are beholden to their desires when they're the exact people who should have most control over that domain. (A general observation, not directed at anyone in particular. I think of wikisocion)

I can't imagine there being too much evolutionary advantage to sitting around stroking oneself all day, so it's strange to me that it's taken for granted that Si leads are beholden to their desires when they're the exact people who should have most control over that domain. (A general observation, not directed at anyone in particular. I think of wikisocion)

This would be supported by the fact that Si suggestives tend to be kind of "whiny" in this aspect. My IEE sister always seems to be in some sort of minor state of physical distress.

Originally Posted by fox

My EII sister has Si HA, and once a month she will cook a big fancy complex home cooked meal just for herself (and she will offer me some), and I honestly don't understand why she does this... like, I can't find a logical reason for anyone to do that unless they are trying to impress someone.

I do that too sometimes. Once in a while, it's fun to cook extravagantly and put garnishes and multi-step sauces and a side salad and everything together for a weekend meal. It's a creative activity that gives you a very satisfying benefit at the end of it.

As for myself, I have a strong fashion sense, but there's always something slightly unkempt about it in that I don't really polish shoes, there's some wrinkles, etc. I am reasonably adventurous in my food tastes, but in my own cooking, I repeat meals a lot. It's very easy for me to identify why I do/do not like a specific food.

I actually have a lot of anxiety about sleep, and used to have more. I would lie in bed for 2-3 hours before my brain would get tired, and then my head would still be spinning about how late it is and how I still haven't fallen asleep. I would panic that if I didn't get enough sleep, that disruption to my internal state would completely throw me off the entire day (Si role alert), and it would make me feel miserable, and tired, and I wouldn't be able to focus, so I'd fall behind on everything I was working on, and I'd probably behave like an asshole, and oh my god it's 2 a.m. and I'm still not asleep. I seriously don't get as panicked about anything else in my life, ever. I take sleeping medicine now that also serves as a mild anti-anxiety medication. It's made things so much better. I've been able to stop down the dosage slightly, too, since my brain no longer associates sleep with fear.

I think the Si role attitude is that Si is like a chore; if you take care of it you won't have to worry about it, so you might as well do minor upkeep so you can focus on the rest of your life. Sometimes it's nice to have someone else do a chore for you, but you feel very patronized-to if they start planning your meals and doing your laundry. And certainly you'll never be fully neat and tidy like some of your friends, and if they called your house messy, you'd feel rather pressured.

Last edited by Stellafera; 01-20-2018 at 09:24 PM.

Phobic So/Sp 6w7 3w2 9w1
Bit of a comic books nerd, bit of a fashion nerd, a lot of a generalized nerd

This would be supported by the fact that Si suggestives tend to be kind of "whiny" in this aspect. My IEE sister always seems to be in some sort of minor state of physical distress.
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That is relatable. I've been told so many times by my mother (who surely is a high-dimensional Si user i think) that i act like a big baby even at the slightest sign of catching the common cold, a pain, etc.

that's probably more Fe fussiness. Si distress of the variety Si doms detect in Si suggestive is the unstated and unknown state the Si suggestive is in but the Si dom runs ahead in perceiving. It is how they help eachother. People can in fact know eachother more than they know themselves. Its how Fe doms reach Ti types by always asking them what's wrong and digging into them

that's probably more Fe fussiness. Si distress of the variety Si doms detect in Si suggestive is the unstated and unknown state the Si suggestive is in but the Si dom runs ahead in perceiving. It is how they help eachother. People can in fact know eachother more than they know themselves. Its how Fe doms reach Ti types by always asking them what's wrong and digging into them

I still think it's Si related since the concern is triggered by me having no idea how to balance out my physical sensations or what triggers them.

My sense of smell is awful unless its really overt, usually when people tell me they have farted (which I find really not funny) I can't smell it but everyone else can. I like "aesthetics" but I always prefer aesthetics if they have some personal meaning to me like I like the aesthetic of melancholy or royalty, I could just say I like purple but yeah I like purple things. I usually suck at telling when I'm coming down with something and I've basically been ignoring my really bad knee for months now lol.

EIEs typically are very picky about sensations. That's the nature of the PoLR, you don't know on which foot to stand.

I've seen EIEs telling the bartender they want some special kind of bubbles in their drink, or changing socks before going for a walk so to have completely dry socks. Or complaining when dancing that I'm either holding their hand too tight or too loose.

EIEs typically are very picky about sensations. That's the nature of the PoLR, you don't know on which foot to stand.

I've seen EIEs telling the bartender they want some special kind of bubbles in their drink, or changing socks before going for a walk so to have completely dry socks. Or complaining when dancing that I'm either holding their hand too tight or too loose.

EIE = The princess and the pea

LOL I love this comparison, it's perfect. Yeah, this does clear up a bit of the fog and what-i-thought-to-be contradictions about EIEs and their Si polr.

"You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it."