“This I Believe” I can change who I am

As I grow up and make many mistakes in my life. I believe that I am always changing.

I had a choice to change for the better or the worst I choose to change for the better. When I look back on the way I use to be I realized that my attitude had to change. At the beginning I was in between quite and loud then I started hanging out with other people and leaving my friends behind. I left the people that truly cared for me for the ones that I was not sure about. A lot of the problems I got into were because of the friends I choose to have. One day in school a guy started to hit a girl I new and I went to help her thinking that was the right thing to do but a teacher came and thought we were playing. When I tried to explain to her what was going on she did not believe me or the girl. That’s when I started getting in trouble in school. I thought if they do not believe me then why listen to them. Even thought I got a lot of detentions that did not stop me or when my parents yelled at me that just made it worst. I felt like they did not care for me because they were always yelling instead of talking to me. I was a crazy girl when I was younger. I was loud, got into trouble and did not care what people thought of me. Many people I know now don’t believe me that I was like that because I’m quiet now. At around age twelve I decided to hang out with some of the troublemakers because it seemed to be fun at that time. I saw that they would do what they wanted to do at any time, and thought to myself why can’t I do that. For choosing those friends I use to get into a lot of arguments with my mother because I wanted to spend time with them for we could hang out. At one time we stopped talking to each other because of my friends in that moment I did not care but when I look back I wish I could take those days back. Little by little when I started hanging out with them even more. I started to do what I wanted, and I stopped listening. Now that I look back as lot of arguments between my mother and I could have been avoided.

Time went by and I kept doing what I wanted and not listening. I saw what I was doing was hurting the people I love especially my mother. But back then that was the way I would get her attention because she was always paying attention to my brother. I felt left out because of my mother at times it felt like I did not exist because she would not pay as much attention to as she did to the others. That’s why I got along more with my father, and my sister because they were always their when I needed something. It was a regular day my brother’s, my sister and I went to school and my father went to work. After I got back from school I saw that my sister was sad and I asked her what was wrong but she couldn’t tell me. All I herd was silence and saw sad faces. A couple hours later my dad came home and he told me what was going on he told me that my mother was in the hospital. When I heard that I just burst into tears because I knew that she was real sick . All I could remember was him saying to me calm down Gaby she will be okay. A couple days later she came home I can still remember that day she was pale, and that same day I found out that she almost passed away. When I heard that I lost it I did not know what to do, what to say. I do not know what I would do with out her. Since that day it has not been the same between us. We have our up and down’s but our relationship has improved and I try my best to make sure that she does not get stressed out. I believe in changing who you are. That’s when I changed for the better, I changed for her I started listening, and doing better in school. I’ve learned that life gives you a second chance, when it does take it. Even thought I’m not as loud as I use to be now that I changed I feel better about myself because I don’t hurt the people I love the way I use to. I focus on my work more and get better grades.

Shop on Amazon and support This I Believe

We receive up to 10% of every purchase you make on Amazon through this link. So do all your shopping here and help support This I Believe!

Top 100 Essays USB Drive

This USB drive contains 100 of the top This I Believe audio broadcasts of the last ten years, plus some favorites from Edward R. Murrow's radio series of the 1950s. It's perfect for personal or classroom use! Click here to learn more.

This week’s essay

As half of the magic act Penn and Teller, Penn Jillette enjoys challenging his audiences with the unconventional. In stating his personal credo, Jillette finds liberation in believing there is no God. Click here to read his essay.