5 Tips for Overcoming Loss & Loneliness by Obiageli Danjuma

Ndewo nu! I’m back again o.. Today, I’m talking about how I overcame loneliness and loss. If you didn’t read my post Monday, you can check it out

God didn’t create man to be alone. He looked at Adam and determined there it is not good for him to be alone. He has instilled in each of us a desire to be loved and have connections to another human being. When that need that was created by God’s design is not fulfilled, we become unhappy.

Why do people have the notion that when you’re a believer, you have to be “on” all the time. We Christians suffer from depression and loneliness too. I suffered from it. My 10 year attachment to my husband was snatched away from me and left me void. I had no family in London, no real friends so yes I loved Jesus but I was unhappy. I was hurt, pained and angry.

The difference however between a believer and a non believer is that we know that the solution to all our issues lay on the cross. (Disclaimer: If you’re suffering from clinical depression or any other mental disorders please see a medical professional) One relationship should trump all relationships and that’s the one we have with our personal Savior, Jesus Christ. Once we have accepted His abundant life in our hearts. we can take practical steps to work on us.

Here is what I did:

I accepted I had an issue. God can’t do anything with who I pretended to be. I approached the throne and told Him what He already knew. I was broken and needed help.

I accepted what I couldn’t change. I couldn’t make Zayd come back to me. So it was time to move on. I had boys to raise.

I changed what I could. I moved myself and the boys from West London to East London. A fresh start in a new environment.

I joined a new church, meditated on the Word day and night. I also took up a new hobby: Clothing designs. That worked out because Rasheed opened a boutique for me in Abuja 🙂

I made new friends. One was Tega’s mother, Victoria. You see, we worked the night shift in my new job then together. Her husband was deceased, while mine walked out but we both experienced loss. You’ll read about Tega in Kamal’s book.

Loneliness can be overcome but it starts with a renewed mind that is determined to break from its grip. Ask God for the courage to try new things and trust that His will is always perfect for you.

Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead Philippians 3:13

Obiageli.

Hey y’all this is Unoma. I trust you’re enjoying this time with Mama D. She’ll be back on Friday. Don’t forget to get the series as it is currently on sale. You can order here

Thank you Mama D 🙂 for keeping it real. We are imperfect beings loved by a perfect Savior. Loss and Loneliness are tough to deal with. That is why Tip #1 resonated with me the most though all of what you shared are important to come to a place of Shalom…which is by itself a process. Looking forward to meeting your friend Tega on the next installment 😉

Mama Danjuma,
You entered my life at the right time Gods timing is perfect .
I enjoy the stories about your sons and now learning your wisdom we see where the men get it from. Folks love to compare my relationship with God to the silliest things instead of how I live. Thank you for reminding us to trust God