A YEAR OF 6S

We’re delighted to be writing you after another incredible year. We couldn’t be prouder of 2015, and we can’t wait to share with you all the wonderful things we have planned for 2016.

We’ve kept busy this year, simultaneously reinventing television, news, and the music industry. They were all in pretty bad shape, but we built some apps and they’re basically fixed now! We also made a really big iPad, which Tim is wild about. It’s truly the biggest, widest, and heaviest iPad we’ve ever made. There’s also a tumor-shaped battery pack (check your stockings!) and a new phone that you can Force Touch. We thought that would sound like a cool Star Wars thing, but a lot of people thought it sounded like a sex crime? Oops!

Jony has been particularly busy turning his watch-collecting hobby into a real business. His new watches keep excellent time, and we’re all very supportive. We’re not quite sure what they’re for yet, but we’re excited to find out. We also welcomed some new members to the family. Drake, 29, is a hard-working young man who’s been doing some very exciting things. We think he’ll go far, which is why we’re not letting him out of our sight. Expect a mandated appearance at every family function for the next two years.

One thing that has bothered us this year is the glut of bad cinema. I’m particularly thinking of two movies — a quick-talking drama and a documentary, neither of which I wish to name here — that paint Steve in a bad light. That said, check out that new Pixar one with dinosaurs — it’s supposed to be non-libelous.

Has it been a perfect year? No. As Drake reminds us, there are always haters questioning the soundness of our design principles — but the holidays are a time to remember our blessings, especially the blessings of family and the blessings of managed, proprietary ecosystems. Thank you for being a part of ours.