Chelsea Clinton, daughter of former president Bill Clinton and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, is marrying Marc Mezvinsky this Saturday in a ceremony that will be attended by Barack Obama, Barbra Streisand, and Oprah Winfrey. Here's what to expect from the nuptials:

Misguided toast from drunk uncle about Chelsea's "ugly years"

Continuing a White House tradition, Chelsea will wear the famous wedding dress worn by such former first daughters as Jenna Bush, Caroline Kennedy, Tricia Nixon, and Margaret Truman

An ultimately unsuccessful but surprisingly robust challenge from the wedding of Ross Perot's daughter

Photo booth manned by Annie Leibovitz

Countless requests to have groom pointed out

Janet Reno finally catching the bouquet

Liberal elite drowning themselves in the fruit borne of overtaxing the middle-class

A self-indulgent New York Times Weddings section write-up to end all self-indulgent New York Times Weddings section write-ups