Has your dog ever barked, and the bark sounded a lot like he was saying "I really would like to go to outer space?" Have you noticed your cat attempting to defy gravity on a regular basis? Now, you can memorialize your pet after death by making their astronaut dreams come true.

Celestis Inc., a Houston firm that has been sending human remains to space for years, will now begin sending pet remains, too, the Associated Press reports. The spaceflights start at about $995.

As if you didn't already have enough workday distractions, now you can follow your dog on Twitter and get "humorous" tweets when he barks, sleeps or eats. Puppy Tweets is a dog tag with a motion sensor, and every time your dog moves, it sends out a tweet to the dog's Twitter feed. You should probably send out a mass corporate e-mail about this. We just know all of your work friends are going to follow Barkley.

Photo: Fotolia

Puppy Tweets

As if you didn't already have enough workday...

Puppy Tweets As if you didn't already have enough workday... Photo-4099273.55853 - SFGate

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Neuticles

Kim Kardashian's dog, Rocky, has Neuticles, or as they're called in the pet plastic surgery world, testicular implants for pets. We think you'll agree that Rocky looks much more confident than this dog, who clearly does not have Neuticles.

Was potty-training your kids the greatest experience of your life? Would you like to do it all over again...with a cat? And then, would you like to share a toilet with your cat? If you answered "yes" to all of these questions, then cat toilet training is for you. But be aware that we're not coming to your house anymore.

We hate it when our cats jump the fence and escape our yard. That's why we're planning to get this device, which is sort of like a 1-pound ball and chain, and attaches to your cat with a cable and is supposed to keep Kitty on the ground. Chasing bugs? Yes. Sitting under a tree? Yes. Climbing a tree to catch a bug? Depends on how determined your cat is.

Photo: Fotolia

Backyard Cat

We hate it when our cats jump the fence and escape our...

Backyard Cat We hate it when our cats jump the fence and escape... Photo-4099265.55853 - SFGate

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Pet sweaters

We're not talking about sweaters for your pets here. We're talking about sweaters of your pets, as in, sweaters made from the hair of your pet. You can trim it from your dog or cat. You can collect it from the little dust bunnies that gather in your living room. Or you can wait until after Fifi dies and make a sweater to remember her by. You could even mix the fur of your dog and cat together, and use it to create the worst Christmas sweater in the history of time.

Some things should just be left unsaid. For instance - what your dog was thinking about when he peed on the rug. But famous pet psychic Sonya Fitzpatrick, who is from Houston, wants to tell you all that and more. Which Halloween costumesembarrass your pet? What is your cat's five-year plan? You can learn how to talk to your pet at Fitzpatrick's upcoming Houston workshop, slated for Feb. 23.

Photo: Fotolia

Pet psychics

Some things should just be left unsaid. For instance -...

Pet psychics Some things should just be left unsaid. For... Photo-4099268.55853 - SFGate

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Pet birthday parties

The key to throwing a cat birthday party, according to this extremely informative website, is this: Don't invite any other cats. This pet party planner in Austin will also help you throw a "puppy shower," "litter party," "bark mitzvah" or "yappy hour." Graduation parties are also on the list. Graduations from what?

Ever just wanted to throw your dog in the washing machine? No? We haven't either, and we're guessing no one else did, since the Dog-O-Matic seems to have died out the same year it was introduced, in 2009. This washing machine for dogs looks terrifying. And the dog had to stay in there for half an hour. The entrepreneur said he thought people would get used to the idea.

What did that dog just say to me? Now you can find out, with Bow-Lingual, which promises to interpret your dog's barks and lets you know if Fido is feeling happy, sad, frustrated or lonely. There's even a home alone feature. You'll want to read the Amazon reviews.

Photo: Unknown, Fotolia

Bow-Lingual

What did that dog just say to me? Now you can find out,...

Bow-Lingual What did that dog just say to me? Now you can find... Photo-4099271.55853 - SFGate

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Luxury dog mansions

This luxury pet house may look extravagant, but it's actually bare-bones compared to the $25,000 some people spend for a mini dog mansion, complete with wallpaper and framed dog portraits on the walls. The dogs, reportedly, do not care about dog portraits.

This dog has a tattoo because it's off fighting drug traffickers in Columbia. Your dog, who might wake up at 1 p.m. to take a leisurely stroll from the sofa to the water bowl, does not merit a tattoo. But, if you think he's tough enough, you can get him a temporary tattoo, like a shamrock for St. Patrick's Day, or perhaps the Baltimore Ravens for the Super Bowl.

Photo: JAVIER GALEANO, AP

Pet tattoos

This dog has a tattoo because it's off fighting drug...

Pet tattoos This dog has a tattoo because it's off fighting... Photo-4099196.55853 - SFGate

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Pet perfume

According to its website, Oh My Dog! perfume is unisex and specially-adapted to all dog breeds. We're sure the dogs are relieved.

If you weren't satisfied after embalming your last pet, give freeze-drying a whirl this time around. PerpetualPet.net, for instance, promises you'll be able to choose your pet's pose, and your four-legged friend "can be held, carried, transported and even gently petted" once the process is finished. For large dogs, it can take up to 6 months.

Are you still waiting to get married, or did your own wedding not go as planned? Why not live vicariously through your pets? One dog wedding held last year in New York was labeled the most expensive pet wedding ever, at a cost of $250,000 (it was a fundraiser, and most of the services were donated, but still). The previous record holder was a cat wedding in Thailand in 1996.

Photo: Tina Fineberg, Associated Press

Pet weddings

Are you still waiting to get married, or did your own...

Pet weddings Are you still waiting to get married, or did your... Photo-4099089.55853 - SFGate

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Post-Rapture pet care

It's been said that all dogs go to heaven, but it seems they are not taken to heaven during the Rapture. Pet owners who believe in the Rapture need not worry, however - they just need to pay $10 to register their pets to be taken care of after the event by this network of non-Christians. It's a volunteer service, according to the website. Another post-Rapture pet-walking servicerevealed in March that it was a hoax, but After the Rapture Pet Care insists that it's legit. We suppose you'd just have to trust them now and find out later.