Why write?

I feel I owe myself an explanation for writing so much so fast, so frequent – just so, really. I’ve kept various formats of journal for years – a writing notes computer one, paper bible study notes notebook, a written journal and recently, after taking a journalling course, a colourful, erratic, badly written one complete with stuck in bits of paper, bad drawings and as much honesty as I can muster. I feel pretty much that unless I can see what I think written down, then I can’t think. I’ve tried explaining this to a more conventional headed friend, to a completely blank look- I even have to write down the answers to the bible study questions. I would say that my first heart language is written words. Spoken language is more challenging: when I first tried to talk about my life and background with someone who genuinely wanted to be God’s loving and kind listening ears, I felt like I had been strangled. I needed a couple of gin and tonics to talk even that fluently. But I am slowly finding those words with people who have very gently coaxed this tortoise of a person out of their shell. Because I am no longer the person I once was, and I can remember being this person all too clearly. I think that’s why I so appreciate hearing other people’s stories, because I have hopefully learned a little gentleness from the difficulties of learning to become even a tiny bit more the person God had in mind. It’s exciting, watching people grow and change.

So for me, writing a blog is interesting! The equivalent of being superman – either hiding in a phone box, or wearing a big fat S on your shirt and your underpants over your trousers! Someone who would be classed as a quiet and reserved person, attempting to explain the scrapbook of assorted bits and pieces that lurk like a kids kaleidoscope in your head.