Our patients demand the best, and we are doing our best within our limited neural networks.

Peer pressure scorns you when you haven’t published enough papers.

Your brain and body work best when you have enough rest.

We have to accept that we can never know everything.

We’re not perfect.

And despite the external factors set to validate “success,” we have to remember we’re able to set our own internal values.

We’ve been in the undergraduate medical class where people sneered at Mindfulness and Resilience training.

We’ve been there when we were too scared to call in sick despite being sick with gastro, because we’re worried our colleagues will think we’re too “soft” or faking it.

We’ve seen colleagues return to work when they’re still having gastro, risking hospital outbreaks, because they are the only Registrar on call that weekend in a major city hospital, and their bosses don’t get paid for stepping in for them.

You feel pressured to return to work before you’re well, too.

Yet other colleagues make it difficult for the workplace to trust your cohort, because when they call in sick, they’re pictured at festive events the same day they were meant to work.

We’ve been told we’re worthless by Directors of Training, despite studying and working at the cost of seeing loved ones when they needed us.

We’ve cried through weekends off because they were never really “off” when you had to study, study, and study for fellowship.

We were told by Colleges and work paraphernalia to look after yourself and seek help.

When we tried to do more sport or see friends, we had the opportunity cost of less time for study group.

We were told we didn’t want it badly enough, and we knew that was bull.

Yet it’s never enough.

There’s always going to be someone who says you’re too “soft” or worse.

You have to learn to tune them out.

You have to know what’s important to yourself.

What happens if you do achieve that goal you’re seeking? Will it really make you happy? Or will it more likely unlock another list of far-reaching career accomplishments you’ll need to add to your LinkedIn?

You have to accept that the only thing you can be perfect at is being YOU.

Being the one who your aunts and childhood friends call on your birthday.

The one who gets to hold your nephew.

The one who gets to laugh at your partner’s jokes.

The one who bakes the best cake in the family.

Who were you before you started your degree?

What interests did you enjoy along with medicine or your profession?

What did you do to relax?

If the answer’s “Nothing!” to all of that, you can still start something now.

Did you ever talk to anyone outside of work about your problems?

The strongest thing you can do is find someone.

Your problems are NEVER too small to share with someone who cares or is trained to help.

Lifeline, Beyond Blue, a counsellor, psychologist, a GP, the Victorian Doctors’ Health Program– they’re all there to help you.

Most major workplaces including hospitals, manufacturing factories, corporations, and so forth- have an Employee Assistance Program or similar where staff can access free, confidential counselling sessions.

You can go to the other side of town or chat over the phone, and not let it be known to anyone in your workplace or fellowship college.

You may not click with that counsellor or listener immediately, but persist – or try someone else. It’s not personal. The counsellor relationship doesn’t have to be perfect immediately.

Try something new. The brain loves novelty. Attend an acting class. An illustration class. A free yoga session on the beach. Be anonymous. Challenge yourself to step out from what you know. That one-hour break at the new yoga session could be exactly what you need to feel reinspired.

Call a friend you haven’t seen since school. It’s amazing how similar our paths are, despite differences in uni degree (or lack of- and it’s incredible what lives people can build for themselves without a college or uni diploma!). The same stressors. The same feelings of lack of self-worth in any industry.