Over the holidays, my family enjoyed the company of my nephew, who is 23 and was traveling solo around the U.S. for a couple of months. When he left our house for his home, he had a new plan for his future, and he was ready to act on it. The couple of months on the road seemed to give him the perspective he needed to make up his mind.

I think the early twenties is a difficult time. For many college graduates, deciding what to do next can be difficult, and if the job market is tough like it is right now, the decisions are not all up to you. Unfortunately it’s a time of life where our decisions can impact the rest of our lives, yet we don’t always have the life experience to know what is best.

When I graduated from college, I didn’t look very far into my future. I wanted to travel, and I applied for a program that would allow me to live and work in London for six months, and this is what I did.

It was a wonderful experience in many ways, but I think what it did the most for me was help me understand what living on my own really meant. Growing up as a relatively privileged girl and who also had the resources to travel abroad at this time in my life, I needed to learn this.

At the time, I lived in Las Vegas, and though it’s a large city, it’s not city living like London (or New York or Chicago, etc.). I think I had a fairly protected upbringing too. So getting off the plane in London and trying to get around that city on my own was quite an experience.

When I got to my hostel and asked for directions to the place I needed to go, the person behind the counter gave me a book, which was the map to London. It was a little intimidating thumbing through a book that I needed to learn how to use quickly.

Later I connected with a sister of a friend from back home who happened to be on the same program I was in, but little did I know that this sister was not the most punctual or speedy person. I didn’t spend a lot of time with her over the course of the six months that I was there, but I learned that when I did see her, I would need to wear my patience cap.

The second day I was in London, I helped this girl take quite a long train ride to pick up her luggage in a hotel near the airport. By the time we got back to the city center, it was late at night, and the subway was shutting down. My acquaintance got off at her station, and I needed to go two more stops. Unfortunately, my train quit for the night at the next station.

It was 11 p.m., and it was my second night in the big city. I had never ridden in a subway before, so I had no idea how it worked. But I held the panic at bay until I could ask someone what I needed to do, and I was directed to another train across the platform. It’s laughable now, but it’s these little experiences that can start to strengthen an unseasoned young person.

My next near-panic attack came when I deposited my savings in a local bank, and then I learned that I wouldn’t be able to withdraw any money from that account for a few days. I’m lucky I had kept just enough money to buy my subway ticket to work and back for those few days. I had just enough food stashed away to subsist too. Again, I chuckle at this. It’s not like I would have ever been homeless or starving, but for someone for whom everything in life had been so easy, it woke me up a little bit.

As I navigated my way around that incredible city, found a job, a place to live and the things I would need to live there, I surprised myself everyday. The butterflies that were in my stomach during those first days went away, and I learned that I loved to travel alone. I feel extremely fortunate that I was able to have the experience, and I will always credit it for giving me the confidence I needed to meet other challenges later in my life.

Shelli Bond Pabis is a Winder resident and columnist for the Barrow Journal. You can send comments about this column to shelli@mamaofletters.com.

spent about 10 years of my life overseas, in europe mostly but also the ME and Korea with teh US Army. Fond memories of my youth and many lessons.

The one that i am reminded of the most is how fortunate i was to be born an American!

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