Chapter 2 – Road Rage

We’ve all been there. Someone at the front of the queue of traffic is being a tad over-cautious, but you’re quite contentedly trundling along at a steady 50 in a 60 limit. It’s Friday, you’re on your way home, its sunny, the windows are wound down and there’s feel-good weekend music playing. It’s that rare half an hour where you feel somewhat at peace with the world.

Well this week, for me, that was short lived. A quick glance in the wing mirror (yes I do use them sometimes) showed me that someone had decided we weren’t moving fast enough. They had also decided that the other lane – usually designated for cars going in the other direction – should now become their own personal “I’m more important than the rest of you” lane.

So from 3 cars behind, with full beam headlights channelling the power of the sun into my rear view mirror, emerges a white beast – propelling itself forward past a number of cars before realising its error. There was no gap for it to pull back in to.

I’ve never been prouder of so many drivers at once for the solidarity shown that day. The oncoming bus had come to a complete stop, impeded by this now equally stationary moron. Before it has been forced to stop, it has surged past me and at least 10 other cars.

We’d all seen what happened. And we we’re all going to see justice served. As I passed with a smug look on my face (as i suspect my fellow comrades did also), I couldn’t help noticing the crestfallen panic on the chops of the lad sat beside me. Fourty-something with hair gel covering his bald patch and sunglasses now sliding visible down his increasingly sweaty nose, he knew what he had got himself into.

I like to think he was stuck there for hours. I’m confident he ended up a lot further back than where he started. I feel a bit sorry for the bus driver and his passengers, but sometimes, sacrifices must be made for the greater good.

And yes, just in case you were in any doubt, of course it was an Audi.