It took the BET Awards to bring me back to full on soapbox mode and thanks to user Alisvideo over at Dailymotion.com for putting the video up so quick so that I could have visual for my blogging. Well I, along with everyone else in America probably, was expecting to see Usher joined on stage by Beyonce and Lil Wayne to perform the hit remix of “Love in Da Club”…no dice. We had to endure four or five minutes of Usher sliding around the stage doing what he always does best…dancing his ass off but really I was expecting the collaboration or at least the new song “Moving Mountains”.

Kobe Bryant won Best Male Athlete but wasn’t there to collect his award. Seriously, why do they keep giving him shit…he never shows up to receive it…didn’t he say he wasn’t black or couldn’t relate to black people(lol). Take the hint, You people stop giving that man awards

Jezzy came out to perform and was OVERSHADOWED by Kayne West on his own damn song…what’s up with that? Let’s just say, if he’s the snowman then the heat from Kanye’s performance melted his ass.

THE OH MY GOD…NO THEY DIDN’T moment happened when Keysha Cole’s mama, Frankie, and sister, Nephi, did the pre-commercial announcement telling everyone to call in and vote for the Viewer’s Choice Award. Nephi was literally about to fall out of the top of her dress. Seriously, it was about to be a full on frontal, while Frankie, who always appears half in the bag, was her signature rowdy self as she announced that her baby would be performing next but what mama wouldn’t be excited, I guess….

…speaking of half in the damn bag, what the hell was going on with Keysha because her performance was extremely lacking. I think she was having mic issues because she looked as if she were singing her little heart out but the volume just wasn’t there, as she stood there stood in her prom dress. But wait it turns into a skanky white short set for her performance of her hit “Let It Go”. She was hopping around the stage in stiletto boots about to trip over herself. Who didn’t see the Lil’ Kim coming…and what’s up with Lil Kim sporting the Kim Kardashian hips. Kim really should have grabbed one size bigger in the pants department. It looked like those spandex jeans were going to roll right off her fat ass and someone please tell her to keep her belly covered. She too old and too chubby for that shit. She can officially go back to calling herself “Big Mama” because that name would definitely stick to her fat ass now. On a good note for Lil Kim, she finally got her nose fixed and it looks spectacular!

Ne-yo gave his best Michael Jackson Smooth Criminal impression performing his new hit song “Closer”…but what else is new? BEST FEMALE HIP HOP ARTIST went to Missy who won and didn’t even show up! After BET had to do away with the category in 2007 due to lack of candidates, you’d think any female nominated would have shown up just in support of the category..but I’ve seen Missy at those “making of” specials and she’s always toasted. IT’S OFFICIAL!!! The BET awards are a J.O.K.E. The Dream won for Best New Artist…he didn’t even show up. If you don’t show up, then you should automatically lose you award. But what does that say about an award show when have of the folks getting awards don’t even bother to show up. You don’t see that shit happening at the MTV Awards.

Alicia Keys performed her latest song “Teenage Love Affair”. She sounded alot like an old school Michael Jackson from his Jackson 5 days. Her hips are as wide as all outdoors but she looked good even though her wig was a little to 1980’s for me. Halfway through her set she introduced a very “healthy” SWV by singing the first verse of their song “Weak” while they finished up their own hit before exiting the stage and making way for 90’s power divas En Vogue who still looked great(some groups age better than others). TLC, sporting those motherhood hips, joined Alicia to do a version of their hit Waterfalls, which brought all of our ladies from our favorite girls groups of the 1990s on stage for a finale of swollen hips and stretched vocals. It was great.

Nicey Nash brought this seasons newest accessory…white kids. Go out and get yourself one today! Nicey also introduced the Best Male Hip Hop Artist…Kanye West who in true hip hop fashion brought Lil Wayne to the stage and congratulated his biggest competition for selling a million plus albums his first week out. You could tell that even Kayne felt like Wayne should have won that award…and he should have, hands down, lol.

T-Pain paid a tribute to Bootsie…not really but he was dressed like him as he performed a tribute to himself, joined by everyone from Flo-Rida to Rick Ross to Khalid to Big Boy to Ludacris to perform a few of the hit songs he cameoed on this past year. All of this perform in front of a carnival background to prove that he’s a sho ’nuff clown.

Big surprise(not) that UGK won Best Video Award for Int’l Players Anthem. What kind of award show wouldn’t pay respects by giving the deceased artist an award? Not BET…they keep it real or at least they try to.

Not to be outdone, Chris Brown, hit the stage to sing his hit “With You”. He also won the award for Best Male Artist. He looks as if he’s in need of a serious haircut. The curly Nino Brown look isn’t working for me or him. The blogs will be buzzing tomorrow fueled by rumors about him and the surprisingly limber…well it’s not that surprising Ciara, but I can hear the talk of romance due to their sexy performance. Please bloggers it was just a dance and Rihanna look just as happy about the performance as Beyonce looked at the MTV awards when she pulled Jay-Z up on stage with her.

Lifetime Achievement Award went to Al Green. Tribute sang by Jill Scott singing “Still in Love”, Anthony Hamilton singing “Tired of Being Alone”, and Maxwell. Of course, Al Green got on stage and turned it out. I think he had a flashback of the 70s when he started singing “Let’s Stay Together” and “Love and Happiness”.

Lil Wayne after selling a million plus albums finally won the Viewer’s Choice Award. In all fairness, you couldn’t expect Wayne to really win anything. The man can’t drop a platinum album the week before an award show and think he’s gonna get a trophy. It’s not fair to the artist who really had to grind all year for that Platinum status. He gave a hot performance though…rapping like his freedom depended on it and in a couple of months it will.

Rihanna murdered her own hit (as usual) “Take A Bow”. She’s lucky that she’s beautiful with a hot body because she would NOT make it on talent alone. A good look for her, her rumored boyfriend Chris Brown sang along and knew all of the words….awwww how cute. Take that gossip bloggers, lol.

I appreciate that Nelly never wears a shirt. He was introduced by his girlfriend Ashanti. D.L. Hughley, who hosted, joked that he reads Mediatakeout too and wanted to know if “it” was true. Ashanti’s response: “I traded for something else because I got that good, good”. What the hell does that mean and better yet who the fuck cares? Nelly and Jermaine Dupri performed Nelly’s song “Stepped on My Js” and just in case you didn’t get enough of Ciara with Chris Brown, she was back with her legs greased up and spine bending for her cameo in the song. Fergie came out to help Nelly perform their song “Where My Party People At”.