Beginners Guide to Saunas and Massage Parlours

Updated 13 August 2002

Introduction

This tries to describe the way the massage parlours and saunas operate in
Great Britain. As this covers a wide range it can only be fairly general but it
tries to cover the basics of the range of places available in the UK.

Any comments or suggestions about this guide should be emailed to
faq@traveller.ndo.co.uk and thank you to all those who have made
suggestions.

A Massage Parlour ( or Sauna, they are almost interchangeable ) is a place
where several girls work at the same time, nominally offering massage. It will
normally have a shop front type presence and will cater for casual, walk in,
customers, although in some places you can make advance appointments if you
wish.

A Sauna will normally have a communal changing room, lounge and sauna area as
well as private massage rooms, while a Massage Parlour may not have a lounge,
just the private massage rooms.

It will normally be run by a receptionist who does just that and will not
normally provide a massage or service in the room.

Local papers usually carry adverts, there are the sections in Yellow Pages
for Health Clubs and for Saunas as well as the usual internet sources such as
the field reports on
this site and the various links
available from here.

Phone up before you go to get a description of the place and the girls from
the receptionist. This will tell you about the prices and the girls they have
working that day, remember more girls = more choice. You will also get some
information about the facilities and the opening hours, normally 11 am until 10
- 12 pm, although some places in some areas do stay open later and some close at
7pm..

However don't believe all that the receptionist tells you especially when she
is describing the girls. They are invariably described to be thinner, prettier
and younger than they really are and the nationalities are usually false.

It has to be remembered that the receptionist's job is to get as many punters
as possible to come in and this leads to the distortions and evasions that
occur. If you remember this it becomes a lot easier.

Some places have web sites where you can see the pictures of the girls and
the interior of the place. Again these are all designed to be flattering.

The Receptionist is probably the most important person in the parlour running
the place. They are usually a woman, although in Scotland the receptionist may
well be a man, don´t let this put you off as he will have seen it all before.

If you want a specific service ask the ask the receptionist, she will have
heard it all before. However you may get an answer ' you will have to discuss
this with the girl when you get here'. What she is actually saying is that she
doesn't know who you are and isn't going to provide information that could lead
to problems with the local do-gooders. Just go along and ask the receptionist
when get there. She may suggest that you see a certain girl so follow her
advice. Alternatively ask if you can have a private word with the girl you want
and ask her directly.

Be careful because if the receptionist says that 'you will have to discuss
that with the lady in the room' she probably means that all that is on offer is
for the girl to massage you, oral with a condom and standard sex!

Most places charge an entry fee, 'door money'. This is usually in the
range £10 - £25, and paid at reception before you go in. It covers the cost of
the room and the use of any facilities in the places, such as the Sauna. The
cost normally depends upon the type of room and the length of time. Extras
features that may push up the cost of the room are things like a Jacuzzi in the
room. You will then pay the girls separately for the services she provided
in the room.

Some places offer all in prices and this normally includes the room fee and
sex. You are usually told this when you phone up, or there may be a menu at
reception. If you take this offer you may want to tip the girl separately if she
gives an exceptional service.

A Sauna is more likely to have a communal changing room and lounge while a
Parlour will have a reception and you will normally go straight to the room.
Some places, of course, are a mixture of both and if want a sauna you will use
the communal changing room and lounge while if you want a massage you will go
straight to the room once you have chosen your girl.

But all the places are slightly different. One thing however is constant, the
receptionist will tell you what to do especially if you tell her that you have
not visited the place before.

In any case you will go in the door and see the receptionist; this may be in
the lounge but in some places you will be in a small lobby talking to the
receptionist through a grille.

If you are in a place with a lobby you will not be given a chance to see the
girls until you have gone in, but if you go straight into the lounge you will
get a chance to see the girls and you may be offered the opportunity to see
round the place before you make any decision.

Places with saunas usually have a communal changing room and showers,
although there may also be showers or Jacuzzis in the room. You will be given a
towel and a locker key and usually a bag to put your valuables in. If you are
given a bag make sure you put your wallet in it as you will have to tip the girl
in the room. If you are not given a bag, leave your wallet in your locker and
you pay the girl when you get dressed. Some places Aquarius in Glasgow and
Chesterfields in Manchester for example, now have lockers that take £1 coins.

You get changed in the changing room put your stuff in the locker, have a
shower and perhaps sauna or steam, wrap the towel round yourself and go into the
lounge.

If you are in a parlour you will usually just choose the girl you want and go
straight to the room. The receptionist will ask the available girls to come and
meet you, you make your choice and that´s it. Sometimes you will be shown
pictures of the girls especially if the girl is busy and then you may decide to
wait for her to come free. Its then a case of sitting in the lounge until she's
ready. Be aware that the receptionist will always say the girl will be free
earlier than she really will be, just to keep you there in case you don't fancy
a long wait

If you want to have a sauna you normally do this first before choosing the
girl and the situation becomes more like the places with communal changing
rooms.

The girls will be sitting around and you may be offered a drink, normally
non-alcoholic. There will probably be a TV set on and some papers to read.

Normally one of the girls, or the receptionist, will normally introduce the
available girls to you and tell you who is busy with a customer at the present
and how long they will be.

There may well be other punters sitting round just like you wondering what to
say. You can always read the papers, watch TV, and at least one place,
Chesterfields in Manchester, there is a pool table where you can play the girls.
The other guys sitting there are probably as embarrassed as you but you all know
one thing, you are all there for the same thing.

Sometimes, especially if the lounge is small, there will be a general
conversation with the girls and the other punters which at times can be very
mundane but other times can be quite entertaining. In places with larger lounges
it is possible to have a talk to individual girls before making your mind up.

Its then it´s a case of choosing the girl you want and she will take
you to the room sorting the booking details out with the receptionist.

Be aware in some places, London Street Sauna, for example the number of girls
exceeds the number of rooms and you may have to wait for a room to be come free.

If there is a Jacuzzi you will normally have that first and usually the girl
will share it with you.

Other wise you will normally be offered a shower to freshen you up, although
the shower may not be in the room, but outside. Just get undressed, wrap your
towel round yourself, take you valuables, have the shower and return to the
room. You are not very likely to meet anybody else except the girls.

You will normally be offered a massage which can vary from good to appalling.
The girl may get undressed straight away or may keep her clothes on if she has
not joined you in a Jacuzzi..

At some stage you will be asked if you want ‘extras´ or 'have you been
here before' or if she knows its your first time there 'have you been anywhere
else'. The girl is just trying to make sure you know what's its all about and
that you are not somebody who as come in for a genuine massage! Just ask ‘What
is available´ and the girl will run through the services that she offers and
the prices. These usually range from £20 to £80, depending upon the place and
the service. Normally the prices are set by the house and are non-negotiable.

What is available will depend upon two things, what the rules for the house
are and what the girl wants to do. Often house rules will dictate that oral will
be covered and all sex safe and any girl found stepping outside the rules will
either be fined by the house or will have leave. Other places are more tolerant
and leave it up to the girl. The receptionist is
a useful source of information if you want a specialist service.

- the girls will have to pay to
work there. This can be a fixed fee per day or so much per client or the
proceeds from the first client of the day.

- some workers in parlours ( not
all, not even a majority, just a few, are intravenous drug users )
- some parlours are run by organised crime elements, and are useful fronts
for money laundering
- there is a growing problem in UK of sex slave immigrants being forced to work
in parlours against their will. The trade in Thai girls in Northampton is
probably over but now it is Eastern European girls in the South East.
- many WG's are made to "audition" with the owner before being
employed
- freebies to owners associates can be prevalent.

Although many places say that they
open at 10 or 11 they are not really expecting the first customer then. The
first hour or so is used to clean the place up, for the girls to get changed and
ready to work. Thus if you turn up as they open up you may not get the warm
reception that you were hoping for. Also if you want to have a sauna or steam,
using that it is available, the sauna and steam room will be stone cold having
been switched off overnight.

In some places the same girls work
all day, and can be quite tired at the end, especially if it has been busy.
Other places work a shift system with the girls changing mid / later afternoon.

These places tend to have busy and
quiet times during the day. Lunchtime / early afternoon is fairly busy, often
there is a quiet period from 5 - 7 and then an evening rush.

Many places will allow you to make
a booking in advance for a specific girl. As some girls are fairly unreliable it
is always best to phone on the day to make sure that the girl is working and to
make your booking then.