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Working Through the Blue Blues

Whenever I wake up in the morning and I open my eyes and I think of one thing: Screw It. Let me go back to sleep. I’ll do it later; I’ll do it tomorrow; I’ll get it done by the weekend. I have the rest of my life to make money and pretend that I enjoy doing it. Today I’ll just phone it in....

Then I’ll write something like this:

How the hell is a living, breathing soul supposed to get up and get excited to go play his or her role? Does every single person on this earth have to get a job?

These are the types of questions penetrating me when I’m feeling low. And, of course, we all know that we attract the same crappy people and situations into our lives, when we are feeling sluggish and shameful and contrite.

Where does this come from?

It probably comes from the fact that most people’s lives are not all sunshine and rainbows. Most have to work for a living. And not all work is glorified in the eyes of the Lord, whomever that happens to be, if anything, to you. In fact, wasn’t it He who had said to consider the lilies in the field? They neither toil nor spin.

Though there isn’t much time for Jesus, when you are recouping from your three-day hangover, after all the fireworks have been shot off, and the condoms are still left in their wrappers. It is the same feeling one gets when they realise that life is what you make it, but we’d never been told just how terrible we could make our lives for ourselves.

The way I see it, the entire country is now suffering from some sort of luxurious delusion. One where so many of us become blinded by how good we have it. Instead we focus on all the shitty things which make life unbearable.

We accept the mediocre jobs, the increases on taxes and spending. We live through the governments and their debts to the bankers. Our swords are kept buried in our closets; we no longer know how to do battle. Only we know how to pick fights with each other, brandishing words, gossip, cynicism and prejudice. Endlessly, within these United borders, bombs are ticking inside of our heads. Just waiting for the next one to go off....

This is just how it feels, like the lyrics of a Thursday song, to ingest the morning commute.

It is a never-ending cycle which perplexes the spirit. It’s the tread-mill of day-to-day that confuses the sensitive and mentally debilitated. Holes in our histories of self and country … leading us into temptation, but delivering us from unemployment. We often wonder if those checks from somebody else’s dime couldn’t hurt. Could they?

I have watched and seen my friends suffer through their miseries. If they have been self-perpetuated, then great: another lesson to learn after kicking ourselves in the balls. And I have felt the same difficulties in my own life. As a creative personality, what is life without a job? The same issues arise, no matter what.

The blue blues come from the world being a split-personality. Not the other way around, as we have so cruelly been told. When a population is deluded, they become easier to steer, manipulate, rob and control.

And so what is left?

We have to decide what is best for each of us. That can’t, and should not, be decided by anybody else. Otherwise you will be living a lie.

Welcome to America.

To be fair, not everyone is a sack of rotten potatoes. We do what we can, in the way that we choose. And if that is not as noble as what the other person might appropriate, then we often say: Screw ‘em.

That’s the attitude of this nation. Apathy. Indifference. And it is leading us into a hellish pit of spitfire and doom, faster than we can even comprehend. What is morally appetising is a lot less certain than what is wrong with our reactive environments. The truth is that the collective mind of the planet is being messed with, en masse. Because it has become much too easy to herd a bunch of sheep. To trick the individual a bunch of B.S. is pounded into our brains in order to keep us thinking in pretty red, white and blue chains.

Those daffodils sprouting up from the cracks, where’d they come from? And what makes us so detached from the fact that our land is being sold right out from under our feet?

Too much to think about. Get up. Get dressed. Get to work.

For some, it’s not that simple....

Either way, we must move on. We can and do aide each other. Even better, we realise that by helping ourselves, we can also become strong enough to concede the other person’s point of view, which is one way of reaching out a hand or finding a human connection. Exactly the point and metaphor of a rainbow, anyway. That there’s more than one way to skin a rhinoceros, what?

Just like there are plenty of ways of not accepting the bars that are slowly being placed around our hearts and minds.