A 20-acre utopia smack dab in the middle of Hillmomba, where Hillbilly Mom posts her cold-hearted opinions, petty grievances, and self-proclaimed wisdom in spite of being a technology simpleton.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

There For The Taking

I might be a little late in posting tomorrow. Because I will be cooling my heels at parent conferences Thursday night. Or WILL I?

Somebody at school says there's going to be a big earthquake on Thursday. That all the earthquakes since something-something year have occurred at 188-day intervals. He had a bunch of notes that he pulled out for verification. Notes he had made, with dates, counting the days. Pardon me if that sounds vague, but I heard it third-hand.

"I only missed it by two days." A subtle reference to the earthquake in southern Mexico on Tuesday. That was the icebreaker. The conversation-starter. The lead in. The hook to set in your scaly cheek, just before reeling you in. One of my lunch table compatriots fell for it. She must not put much stock in his predictions. Because her eyes were a-rollin' like the wheels on the bus going round and round. She had not heard about the Mexico earthquake. Perhaps her time would be better-served on Google News instead of Angry Birds.

"He says we need to watch out on Thursday. Watch out for that big earthquake."

"How? How are we supposed to be ready for an earthquake? Sit and hold onto something?"

"I don't know. But he was shocked that nobody ever put two and two together and saw that pattern. 'It was right there for the taking,' he said."

"Well, I'm not doing anything different."

It will be interesting to find out if he's validated. Or if we should tell him, "You, Sir, are no Long Island Medium." I don't know if she makes predictions like that. But I guarantee you that he does not see dead people.