Sigh. Well, the Colts might have to special order a wall-sized bulletin board for this one. As Steelers fan Israel wrote, "Joey Porter throws down the gauntlet at Troy Polamalu, challenging him for team dummy."

Football Outsiders reader Paul Noonan has a blog where I always learn something. Today I learned about MyHeritage.com, which has face recognition software that allows you to upload a picture of yourself or someone you know and see which celebrities the picture most resembles. So I thought it might be fun for us to enter some folks from the football world and see what the technology comes up with. I got things started with one central figure in each of the upcoming weekend's games:

Memo to the Detroit Free Press: Do you think you could have zoomed in on Russ Grimm's mug shot a little more? I think this is the first time I've ever been able to count how many pores are in an offensive line coach's face.

Meet your 2006 Baltimore Ravens starting quarterback! Well, not quite. Carson Palmer has made it known that he'd like the Bengals to try and keep Kitna, but with pretty slim free agent pickins' at the position, it wouldn't be surprising to see Kitna end up in Baltimore. (free registration/bugmenot required)

You gotta love the headline writers for the New York tabloids. The story is juicy, too: Plaxico Burress didn't show up for the Giants' final meeting of the season on Monday. We all know how Tom Coughlin is about meetings, so this is no way to start the off-season. I really wish I could see every one of the Giants' offensive plays on the coaches' tape because when the TV angles showed Burress against Carolina, he looked like he was dogging it big time. To me, that's a much greater sin than skipping a meeting.

In this week's TMQ, Gregg Easterbrook charts every play of every game to prove his contention that blitzing usually favors the offense. He also has some thoughts on wildcard weekend, being pro-topless but anti-gambling, and creating defensive stats that measure more than total yards and points (Hmmmm). Finally, Easterbrook names his TMQ Non-QB Non-RB NFL MVP.

Eric Mangini, New England's defensive coordinator, is in the running for the New York Jets head coaching job. He's 34 and has only had the title of coordinator for one season, but he's been with Belichick since 1995. One thing potentially more intriguing than the Jets hiring Mangini away from the Patriots is if New York hires some combination of their other coaching candidates: Mike Tice, Jim Haslett, and Joe Vitt.