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Passion?

This video made me think about passion.In a way, Nicholas Tse was right. You have to be honest to yourself to find your passion.

And that made me think.I chose to study Economics for my degree.Yes, I like it. Yes, I'm good at it. But is it my passion?Like he said, when you have passion, you are willing to sacrifice anything for it. That's just how bad you want it.And because sacrifices will happen, when it happen, will you give up or still fight for it?It's because of passion, you will hold on to it with all your might.So, will I be able to hold on with all my might?I mean, my course is quite tough. Since 2005, there has only been 5 students who managed to achieve first class honors.So, will I be able to get first class honors?Or will I give up?And then, two other thoughts appear.I love writing and helping people.I want to do that too.And because Nicholas Tse made it sound like we can only have one passion, I thought I must choose between these 3.

That made me scared.But then, as I thought about this, I realized that maybe, I have 3 passions.

Won't that just make things tough?I mean, you have to hold on to 3 things. You have to fight for 3 things and sacrifice for these 3 things.Won't you fall? There's just too many? That's why people usually have one.Because even with one, it's hard.Won't it be too difficult with 3?But then, I don't care. I want 3.Call me greedy.Call me selfish.But I want it all.And I want to believe that it's possible.Maybe, I'll fall.Maybe not.But I won't give up ever.

After all, this is my life and I want to live on my own terms.

I want to be happy.And to me, being happy is doing what I love.Thus, I will do all the things that I love.

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This is a letter for myself. But this is also a letter for those who find themselves in the same place as I am.

I'm going to admit that life is different from what I initially thought when I was younger.

When I was younger, I assumed that by now, I would have reached or be somewhat close to the life of my dreams.

But now that I reach this point, I realised that I was wrong. I did not take into account that tertiary education took years. Personally, I don't regret my tertiary education because I did enjoy it. Yes, it was insane and difficult but it was fun and I met amazing people there.

It's been a year since my graduation and I find myself being frustrated. I felt disappointed in myself because no, I don't have my own apartment and no, I'm not rocking that cool ass job that I always dreamed of. But no, I don't hate my job either. In that sense, I'm fortunate I suppose. But I feel that it may not be the kind of thing that I want to do.

Man, it feels odd to have people believe in you at the very moment you do not trust yourself. It feels odd to hear people's praises of you when you're feeling incapable. So I guess, it's time for one of my many alter ego to suit up if I wanna win that debate competition!!

Like any other person, I have many alter ego's...and I'm gonna list most of them today.

Ms Drama QueenLikes :Attention and spotlight. She's a diva.Dislikes :People stealing her spotlight or not getting her spotlight.She is : A real drama queen. She whines & complains alot though. She thinks that the world revolves around her.Can't handle :Ms Productive

Ms Arrogant Likes : Winning, winning and winning.Dislikes : Losing and losers.She is : A real mean arrogant person. She really doesn't care about the other people. She thinks she is the best. Mostly, she thinks that her opponents aren't even her equal unless they have proven otherwise. Even then, she still thinks she is better than …

I guess it's time I grow up. When high school is over, I have to grow up, be a mature and a responsible little young lady.There's alot of things I have to learn.

To be honest, I'm a little afraid of leaving graduating from high school.WHY?I mean, I've been going to school for years. And the thought that it will finally end is a relief but also a little frightening.

But it's a new chapter in life. Everyone goes through it. So yea, I'm afraid but excited at the same time. There's so much to do after the graduating. College, driver licence & etc...

I guess I'll miss high school a little. Never thought it would end...but yea, it will soon enough.

Before I left high school, I need some closure. I mean, I made some friends & lost some friends. I do have some regrets. I was such an idiot and arrogant ass last time.So yea, before high school end, I need to send some letters to the few people I hurt.