Cockpunch is an ancient martial striking technique, frequently associated with Ainu midgets and dirty street fighters. Believed to have originated in Germany some 50 million years ago, discovered by proto-lemurs, the cockpunching gene was passed through down to modern Homo Sapiens. Homeopathic Science has connected this gene with other types of sissy fighting behavior, and curiously, hair cancer.

Cockpunching has been known to man since Paleolithic times. Cave paintings in France depict such attacks upon hapless Neanderthals who had wandered too close to Sapiens territory.

The first written records mentioning cockpunching show up in the famous Code of Hammurabi.