ephemeral narratives from a convicted gemini

Q-Day 29: Shitshows, Passover, & Keeping It Real

Both kids’ Easter breaks began today. There’s something oddly ironic about this. No big Easter plans, obv. I was going to make peanut butter eggs but the lunatics have bought out every variety of chocolate chip known to man. I did buy three Hershey’s chocolate bars to use instead, but have managed to eat one and a half so there goes that idea.

Sabra’s birthday was Tuesday, and she would like me to tell you all that a birthday isn’t a birthday unless you throw up.

She would also like me to tell you there was a wicked thunderstorm at 4:00 am the next morning and she’s sorry she pulled the cord out of daddy’s laptop.

Monday morning was stressful, having issues logging in and toggling between the three applications I use for work. I called my office and a coworker said, “it’s a shitshow here.” Good times.

I found a gray hair in my eyebrow. Debating on whether to pluck it out. Stay tuned.

I cleaned the house, clearing stuff that’s been lying around for eternity. Todd told me how nice the house looked and then had the audacity to ask me if I wanted “that picture leaning against the china cabinet.” Yes, it needs to be repaired and then I can hang it up again. Well, can I put it downstairs? No, I’m going to fix it. Jeesh, just because it’s been there for a year and a half! Some people.

Plants still look like someone else takes care of them. I’m encouraged by this, and so have repotted one of them and repotted some fresh basil I picked up at the grocery store. This would be a second attempt with grocery store basil, so….sssssh.

It is officially nut-harvesting time and Fergus the ninja squirrel scattered dirt in a two foot radius and dug an 8-inch tunnel into one of my pots on the deck. Further examination revealed two more pots disturbed, and one rogue walnut lying on the deck.

I lost myself in researching a new, and entirely random destination (Northwest Territories) for a trip one day. I’m just trying to imagine when we’ll ever get on a plane again. Not to mention international travel.

So the other side of my family celebrates Passover, and one of them decided to have a Zoom Passover. My mother-in-law said it sounded good but we all have to make all the food then. Todd said he only really wanted Matzoh ball soup and apparently hard boiled eggs which I swear I didn’t hear him say.

Here follows the pros to a Zoom Passover:

The cooking is way less stressful. (Unless you forget something. See above.)

It was a really nice way to celebrate under the present circumstances, not to mention including those who live far away and would otherwise not have been present in person.

No one can see your improvised Seder plate, including the Milkbone aka lamb shank bone.

Everyone can drink and not worry about driving.

Bathroom breaks don’t have to wait hours.

Cons:

Older folks’ difficulty with technology. (It took thirty-six minutes to get them connected.)

Forgetting the hard-boiled eggs. (Todd cooked them during the above delay.)

Emptying Elijah’s wine before we were done. (I don’t think anyone noticed – which could, technically, be another “pro.”)

Having to cook and clean up yourselves.

I made a delicious first attempt at traditional apple-walnut charoset, which went on the Seder plate. I’m very proud of my Seder plate (dog biscuit notwithstanding). I also made Chicken Marbella (from the Silver Palate, a recipe I’ve kept since my first go-round with Passover). Highly recommend.

From the Rabbithole: Disquieting dreams took me to places I didn’t want to go. Terribly distressing dreams about Opac ignoring the warnings and leaving with friends and refusing to come home, and me crying (and crying) inconsolably about this. About going to work in what looked like a factory, and no one was wearing a mask. About wandering around a college campus and trying to find my way back to O and getting lost in mazelike buildings with narrow stairwells. I bet you’re surprised I didn’t sleep well.

And, so as not to leave this on a negative note: I started Tiger King because I don’t like to, as my mom would say, “miss a fart.” This show is entertainment GOLD. I was on the fence, until I heard Joe Exotic’s music. This is one shitshow not to be missed. Trust me, you NEED to hear his music.

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