How to Start to Deal With Problems in Your Relationship?

So you are having difficulties in your relationship, whether it is a marriage, someone you live with, or a person you date. You know what that makes you? Human. Having issues when dealing with a person who you are romantically involved with is a part of life. In fact, if you do not have issues right now, it could be that you or the other person is swallowing his or her needs and desires for the sake of getting along, which makes it seem like everything is perfect. Instead, though, it could be the sign of even bigger problems.

At any rate, dealing with problems in your relationship is vital if you want to have a future with that person. Here are some tips on how to do so sensibly:

Examine your perceptions, expectations and desires

Before you assume that the other person is wrong, think about what your perceptions are, as well as your desires and expectations. Maybe you have a desire to have a perfect relationship like you see people have on TV, but that is not realistic. It is also unrealistic to expect that you and your partner don't need to have any other friends, and that you can get all of your needs in life from that person.

Another deadly thing that can kill a relationship is if your perception of the person is off. You want to see things clearly, not have black and white thinking, or judging a person on what you expect him or her to be, even when that doesn't match reality. So think about whether the problem is you, before complaining about the other person. That also means getting real about what you may have done to contribute to the problems in the relationship.

Talk to a personal or life coach and your partner, not your friends or relatives

Okay, so now you have done the work on examining what you have done to contribute to problems in a relationship, and examining your perceptions. Yet you still have issues with your partner. What do you do next? Talking to a counselor, or a life coach, is a good idea to work out those issues. When you blab to your friends or family members about these issues, you may think you're blowing off steam, but the people you tell won't forget your complaints, and may hold it against your partner. Not only that, but they will get sick of hearing it after a while.

A life coach can help you and/or partner work on communications skills, come up with problem-solving techniques, and get along better. That's a heck of a lot better than just griping to your friends about how your loved one gets on your last nerve. Click here for more information about a life coach.

With Valentine's Day right around the corner, many people want to welcome love into their lives.The Today Show, Weekend edition, recently invited me to appear live on the air to share some important tips with viewers about how they can Feng Shui their love lives.

If your marriage has seen better days you need to learn how to fix things with your wife. You have to find ways to deal with the conflicts you two are facing, pull her closer emotionally again and build a stronger foundation for the two of you to build your future on together.