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Archive for October, 2008

Diwali has always been special to me. It brings back some of my sweetest childhood memories. The excitement would start building the moment I would see the strings of lights being put up in our lane, usually a few days before Diwali.

A typical diwali day would start at 5 am. Thats when the distinctive marathi songs would blare outta the speakers put up in our lane, annoying a few, and making a few smile. For me, it would be a signal to jump out of bed, collect my bag of crackers made ready the previous night, and run down the stairs. We’d all meet at the gate, set up the candle on some flat surface, and have a ball with the fireworks. A common sight would be; me igniting an explosive bomb, and then covering my ears with my hands, shrieking and running away from the place as fast as possible. It would often result in endless laughter that echoed from all sides.

The remaining part of the morning would be spent taking part in the various races and other events organised by the diwali society. The afternoons would be spent making rangolis. Evenings meant lighting diyas, some of them would be kept on the door step close to the rangolis, and the rest would illuminate the rooms in the house. We’d all save our best outfits for Diwali, dress up and go around the building, comparing rangolis and finally stay down in the compound and watch the beautiful decorations of the lane, take delight with each new song that was played, bask in the cracker polluted air and be a part of the cheerful celebration.

After I moved from that place, Diwali celebrations were more subdued. It meant standing on the door step, forming red rings in the air by orbitting the sparklers, enjoying the mithai, and going up to the terrace to watch the breathtaking pyrotechnic display.

This is the first Diwali I spent away from home. My celebrations included going to class, a visit to the temple, dinner at a friend’s house, and a sole candle that burnt in my room.

Life changes. It gives you new experiences. Some good, some not so good. Nothing stays forever. Only the memories remain.

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Apart from chocolates, and all things chocolate, I’ve never really been fond of sweets. Which is why these cravings come to me as a surprise. So what is it that has brought about this change in me? Why am I perpetually dreaming of what I saw at the bakery or the super market? And why does my mind have to be occupied by never-ceasing thoughts of chocolates, caramel glazed donuts, applie pies, blue-berry cheese cakes, chocolate n walnut brownies, milk chocolate cookies, strawberry cakes, lemon tarts, pineapple pastries, eclairs and the likes?

Why do I find myself wishfully eyeing the tempting goodies, stored close to windows that are meant to entice moony souls like me? Why do I find myself counting my pennies outside sweet shops? Why do I find it so hard to battle the desires that are steadily turning me into a pauper? Why do these cravings make me tip toe to the kitchen in the dead of night to pop in a malteser or a piece of chocolate? Why do I promise myself, saying this is the “last one” and then not live up to it?

And when offered anything sweet, I pounce on it like a starving flood ravaged villager. God save the people around me.

At this rate, I’ll find myself out on the streets in the cold, with no food or shelter, only swirls of sweets surrounding me..

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Its hard to believe its been almost a month since I got to Leeds. The place is exactly how I expected it to be, so settling down hasn’t really been difficult. At the same time, there are a few things that are new to me, a few things that I didn’t anticipate, and its gonna take me some time getting used to.

What matters the most is that its a new life. I wanted to get away from people, but am not sure that is happening, considering our house is full of people at any given time of the day. But its a new life all the same.

Life here is smooth. Perhaps too smooth for my liking. I walk to class, where there are machines that help you cross the road. The sensor activated doors open up when I near the place. I swipe my way through everything. Everythings done in a few smooth steps.

Back in Bombay, getting to college would be an adventure. I’d run upto the gate, plead with the auto drivers to drop me to the station, push through the crowd at the platform, or either drive and battle the traffic jam, get to college, run up the stairs and knock on the door and beg the prof to let me in, and come up with novel excuses for being late.

When I look at this unruffled, machine operated world, I realise how lifeless this existence is. I see people walk by on the roads. And amid long black coats and high-heel boots, I search for humans..

I guess it’ll take me a while to get completely used to this shining, mute world.