I found my own reaction intriguing. I was somewhat happy to see a woman expressing her anger openly and frightened when the man was expressing his. At the same time, I struggled to see the man's fear and had no trouble seeing the woman's.

I'm much more used to a woman's anger going underground and being expressed in much more subtle (and far more destructive to me) ways. Same goes for a man's fear. Perhaps I would have been happier if he had expressed it more clearly (or bystanders had responded to it more strongly).

I agree violence is violence. It would have been nice to see some effort to help the woman take more responsibility for her anger (without repressing it) and some effort to comfort the man (so that he can start healing his fear). Obviously homophobia (and the attitude that men can take any level of abuse) is far stronger amongst men than amongst women. I would also like to be around people who are putting energy into understanding what love and healing are (particularly around male-female intimate relations) and making practical efforts to support it as much as possible in their lives. I don't experience that so much.

It is a disgusting double standard; men make up roughly 50% of the victims of domestic violence, and when people make up pathetic "feminist" excuses and defenses of illegal domestic violence and other forms of abuse that women have committed, it hurts all of us.

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