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Monday, January 5, 2015

A friend told me I had to watch the Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills. These type of shows have never interested me. I
don’t watch TV for reality. I live that every day. I watch TV for fantasy. I want to believe Tom Selleck really is the
police commissioner of New York and Olivia Pope is sleeping with the President
of the United States. But, I did give the Real Housewives a try.

I watched one episode of the Beverly Hills
show and one of the Atlanta version. I don’t get it... I just don’t get why
women watch this.

I have a lot of female friends and although
we all do our share of gossiping, I can honestly say I have never punched one
in the face or tore a friends wig off at the country club.

How can this be real?

The plot is always the same:
Part 1: Two or three of them meet to back-stab the one who is not there.
Part 2: The third one finds out and vows revenge
Part 3: They all break to go shopping for things none of them can really afford
Part 4: They go to a public place (Restaurant, country club, wedding)
Part 5: The fight breaks out. Husbands tear them apart, they get kicked out of
the public place, police are called, etc.

On the show I watched, they all go to a
swanky restaurant for supper. The odd girl out discovers the other three have
been talking trash about her. The screaming starts, apparently they don’t
notice the other diners in the restaurant and the camera man is too busy
filming to give them the heads up. I can only guess that the other diners are “extras”
on the set because I can’t imagine any upscale restaurant would allow this to
be filmed or take place while their “regular” paying upscale clientele are
eating.

Then a housewife grabs the other one by the
hair and the fight breaks out. The main gossip girl, wearing Louboutins stilettos,
lifts her knee and smashes it into the other’s face. Designer clothes are being
ripped from their skinny frames, silicone lips are being smashed (no blood
runs), pumped up breast enhancements are being punched like fighting balloons
and bleach blond weaves are torn from their heads. The fur in flying...
literally.

No one goes to hospital, only to emergency
beauty salon appointments and plastic surgeons.

Now, I am not saying grown women don’t
fight. As a matter of fact, I did have an argument with a friend one time while
having supper with her. We left miffed at each other and didn’t talk for three
weeks. I did think about unfriending her on Facebook, but changed my mind...
Not much of a show here. Move along people.

This show franchise makes grown women look
shallow and trashy. It’s the “16 and Pregnant” for 30 to 60 year olds.

I just hope to Jesus none of my friends
start acting like these women! Can you imagine me and Nancy at the Keg and she
finds out I said something nasty about her. Then she grabs my hair and I punch
her in the face. We fall over tables, while diners give us dirty looks. For the
record, we’re both from Freshwater Road, so this fight could go on all night. Especially
if we have been drinking.

You know…all
women in Canada could only vote since 1960. In 1918 government gave the right
to vote to Canadian women 21 years of age and older but most women of colour -
including Chinese, East Indian and
Japanese women weren't allowed to vote
at the provincial and federal level until the late 1940s. Aboriginal women
covered by the Indian Act couldn't vote for band councils until 1951, and
couldn't vote in federal elections until 1960. So in 1960 all women in Canada
could vote.

Fast forward to 2015. Now we watch other
women, injected with silicone, bitch-slap each other with designer bags on a
weekly bases. Have you noticed there isn’t any “Husbands of Beverly Hills?” Of
course they are out working hard, earning the money,that attracts these women to them.

Women have fought so hard for everything
from the right to help choose our Prime Minister to the right to equal pay for
equal work. Take a good look at these shows and ask yourself “Is that what we
fought for? Is that what I want my daughter’s life to be like?”

In 2015 lets all vote to watch TV that shows
women playing a lead role that empowers, inspires and teaches them to be
leaders... and lets us believe that Tom Selleck is the Commissioner of the
NYPD.

I am Funny Like That

Helen C. Escott retired from the world renowned Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) in 2014 as the Senior Communications Strategist for Newfoundland and Labrador. Before joining the RCMP she worked in the media for 13 years (OZ FM/ VOCM/ CJYQ) in various positions including reporter, on-air personality, marketing and promotions.

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