Welcome to the Chronicles of Gnar. Here you will find courageous tales about headbanging, stagediving, skateboard slams, hair raising and hellraising house parties of destruction. All told from real life metalheads and knuckleheads who lived to tell it all. Every account is loosely based off of actual occurrences.

Heavy Metal Wine Tasting

By Rad Ricky Rodgers

In my early 20's I drove up from Seattle to Vancouver BC to see MEGADETH in concert. There were numerous bands on the bill but I only wanted to see MEGADETH! The concert was utter chaos and MEGADETH had been delivering a grueling set. I had managed to fight my way to the front row to witness Dave Mustaine shred right in front of me. He played some of his most timeless THRASH classics about political corruption, government conspiracy and nuclear annihilation. I couldn't believe how much raw power and insane energy there was. There were multiple circle pits, crowd surfers, shirtless fat dudes, not a lot of girls and tons of sweat.

About half way through the set Dave stopped to talk to the audience. He made note of an ill mannered interview he did with a reporter from some half ass publication that isn't HAZMAT. The reporter had apparently asked a question regarding Dave's choice to not drink alcohol anymore. To which he replied in his ever so snide tone that can only be Dave Mustaine, "What are you talking about?! I have a glass of red wine every night before I go onstage..."

Just as you would expect the crowd erupted in applause with a sea of devil horns and fists thrust high into the air. Dave gestured to stage left where from backstage came his iconic skeletal mascot Vic Rattlehead dressed as a butler with a half filled wine glass on a round tray. Dave snatched and smugly swirled the glass of wine. Then he stuck his nose in to the rim to smell the oaky aromas. He withdrew from the glass, nodding with approval to the audience. "Smells like a Cabernet!" he sneered into the microphone with a cynical grimace. He brought the glass back to his face to take a sip and swish the wine in his mouth. With his opposite free hand, while still swishing and savoring the wine, he managed to hammer and tap a furious guitar solo with without a guitar pick. THEN! He spit the blood red wine back into the glass. The crowd roared as Mustaine shouted while raising the wine glass high into the air "That was a cabernet sauvignon from Sonoma wine country and this song is called "Tornado of Souls!"

His teeth stained purple, Mustaine shattered the glass over his head and took off into the opening riffs of the face melting song. While headbanging, shards of glass fluttered out of his gorgeous fire red hair. The small glass particles sparkled in the air as they reflected the strobing stage lights. The crowd was in a mad frenzy at this point. At front row several longhaired metalheads each held a full glass of the NorCal wine which they daintily sipped from in between windmilling their hair and pounding their fists against the barricades. I looked up and saw Dave sneering through his long flowing red locks in ultimate approval to the legion of headbanging wine tasters. It was a heavy metal night I will never forget.

More on Cabernet Sauvignon:

Cabernet Sauvignon is one of the more widely recognized and globally produced red wines. From mountains, prairies lands, dry plains and coastal regions you can grow its grape vine in a variety geographical and temperature zones.