REVIEW: Haagen-Dazs Five Ginger Ice Cream

When I’m faced with a fork in the road, I take the path that’s less traveled because I like a little adventure in my life and I don’t like the sloppy seconds I’d get with the other, well-used road. I could’ve purchased a normal, safe flavor in new Haagen-Dazs Five Ice Cream line, like vanilla bean, milk chocolate, mint or coffee, but I decided to go with the most unconventional (i.e. f’ed up) flavor instead — ginger.

What makes the new Haagen-Dazs Five Ice Cream line so special is that it contains only five ingredients — milk, cream, eggs, sugar and ginger.

I guess the love they put into it isn’t considered an ingredient.

Since it already contains sugar and spice, all Haagen-Dazs needs is everything nice and some Chemical X and they can probably make their own Powerpuff Girl. They can name her Beauty, if she turns out beautiful, or Bonbon, if she turns out fat.

Much like you don’t expect quality, wholesome programming that stars people you don’t want to punch in the face from MTV, you probably don’t expect a confectionary company to make a ginger-flavored ice cream. It doesn’t seem right because, like beer and Japanese tentacle rape porn, ginger is an acquired taste. And that taste is something I have yet to truly acquire, which I know for a fact because the gag reflexes tell me so. I don’t like ginger snaps, ginger ale or the pickled ginger that comes with my sushi, but I do think redheads are frickin’ hot.

While I do not care for the taste of ginger, for some reason I enjoyed mild ginger flavor of the Haagen-Dazs Five Ginger Ice Cream. Although the first time I tried it, I did something that every valley girl is very familiar with — I gagged myself with a spoon.

The very first taste was a little harsh, but I quickly got over it. I could definitely taste and smell the ginger, and there were even small bits of ginger mixed in with the ice cream, but for some reason the other four ingredients made it extremely palatable. I think the reason why enjoyed the flavor was because after the initial ginger, the flavor kind of reminded me of egg nog, which I love and is the cause of my inflated manboobs during holiday season.

The texture of the Haagen-Dazs Five Ginger Ice Cream wasn’t as creamy as their regular ice cream, which was disappointing. It does have less fat than regular Haagen-Dazs ice cream, but eating a whole pint by yourself in one sitting while getting over a breakup won’t make it seem less like a cliched scene from a romantic comedy.

Overall, I was surprised I enjoyed it, but I was hoping the ginger in it could do a little more, since it’s known as an effective way to treat nausea. It didn’t work when I felt nauseous while watching vile, meaningless programming that stars people I want to punch in the face on MTV, so I don’t think it will work after a rough boat ride.

Item: Haagen-Dazs Five Ginger Ice CreamPrice: $4.49Size: 14 ouncesPurchased at: FoodlandRating: 7 out of 10Pros: Surprisingly pleasant taste. It kind of tastes like egg nog. Less fat than regular Haagen-Dazs ice cream. Contains five all-natural ingredients. Being adventurous and taking the road less traveled. Redheads.Cons: If you don’t like ginger, you probably won’t like this. Not as creamy as regular Haagen-Dazs ice cream. Will still make you fat. The vile, meaningless programming that stars people I want to punch in the face on MTV. Sloppy seconds.

I don’t like ginger either, though I don’t really mind Ginger Ale (it really doesn’t taste all that ginger-y to me)… Maybe I will try this icecream too. Do they have more odd flavors in this 5-ingredient line?

I’ve tried the coffee. I can’t say it tasted any better or worse than any other coffee ice cream, although it’s more apparent now that other brands are probably using a lot of syrup flavoring in their ice cream.

I’m seriously considering trying the brown sugar because it seems like it should either be really, really good or just too sweet.

Hmmmm This sounds like it could be intersting and generally anything you reveiw that is at least a 7 is worth a try… I kinda like the catchy name… “Five Ginger” Ice cream… sounds kinda like the ice cream that one should eat before attempting to infiltrate a mystical temple filled with chainsaw wielding dread ninjas….. Whew, I’m sorry marvo, I think I just went off the deep end!