MARTHA FACES PRISON

Martha Stewart told reporters at a press conference Wednesday morning that she wants to begin her five-month prison sentence ASAP. Although saddened by the prospect of missing out on the holidays, she expressed an "intense desire and need to put this nightmare behind [her]." As expected, Stewart has requested to serve the time at a federal prison in Danbury, Conn. After that, she'll have another five months to lick her wounds (and do some serious redecorating) while under house arrest on her fancy estate.