SUPPORTING / SUPPORT

Parents’ words that do not show respect to a child have two things in common: ignore the feelings of the child and focus on teaching. As a result their message is: “Your feelings are wrong. It would be better for you, if you felt and experienced as I did”. An answer expressing lack of respect makes the child feel stupid, his self-esteem is lowered. Such conversations are devoid of educational effect which the parents want. As a result, the child does not learn to respect others. Child learns to respect – out of the fear – the power of the second man.

Examples:

- You will pay for a visit from your pocket, if you do not calm down …

- Be a man! Behave!

- Surely it does not hurt!

- I am ashamed of you.

- I will leave you here!

- If you are polite, I’ll buy you something.

- I will just grab you by the hand (which covers the mouth) in a moment and will not let go.

- I’ll tell your dad, you’ll see!

- If you leave the chair, I will spank you!

- I will get heart attack because of your teeth!

- Doctor is sad because of you! She/he will not like you!

- You do not need a tooth image, you need the image of the brain!

What did you feel reading these sentences?

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