Party like mad... Or at least like Mad Men might

Does Don Draper do finger food? Judging by the first four seasons of TV’s popular “Mad Men” show it doesn’t seem likely unless we’re talking about a belt of bourbon with a couple of smoking hot Lucky Strikes on the side.

But since that hardly sounds appetizing, we’ve come up with something a little tastier to greet the return of “Mad Men” on AMC on Mar. 25.

First up are the drinks, which include a classic martini — made with gin, easy on the vermouth — and a rummy Hawaiian punch. The latter is a particularly appropriate choice since Hawaiian Punch, the juice product initially created in the ‘30s as a syrup ice cream topping, was the focus for a classic ad campaign in the 1960s that introduced the character “Punchy” and the tagline “How about a nice Hawaiian punch?” That’s an in-your-face approach that might have come straight out of the Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce agency.

And don’t forget the old fashioned, ad exec Draper’s drink of choice. This one’s made with rye, the way Don did in season three’s “My Old Kentucky Home,” episode. We didn’t vault over the bar counter to fix it, though.

For food, we went retro, starting with a plate of deviled eggs, all the better if you can serve them on one of those dimpled trays made especially for this purpose. These have chopped ham and a dash of hot sauce for the “devilry” part. Serve with a smirk and your best impression of the piquant wit of Roger Sterling.

Stuffed celery is a grown-up twist on the old “ants on a log” children’s snack; this is something you can easily imagine the regal Joan Harris whipping up in her small kitchen.

We’ve also come up with an avocado and crab mini sandwich. Avocado — both as a food and color — was a big hit in the 1960s kitchen; this combo brings in a hint of California, the “Tomorrowland” state where Draper goes to overcome his past.

And, finally, how about a cheese ball platter, the nutty classic that everyone cracks jokes about, right up until the plate’s scraped clean of its creamy, cheesy goodness. It’s just the thing for the season premiere, a two-hour special written by series creator Matt Weiner.

What will happen this season? Who knows? The show creators are known for being stingy with spoilers. But it seems a safe bet these recipes will make for a perfectly swell party.

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HAWAIIAN PUNCH

Start to finish: 10 minutes

Servings: 12

12 ounces light rum

6 ounces dark rum

4 ounces orange curacao liqueur

4 ounces lime juice

46-ounce can pineapple juice

16-ounce jar maraschino cherries (with the juice)

20-ounce can pineapple rings

1 orange, cut into wedges

In a large punch bowl, combine the light rum, dark rum, curacao, lime juice, pineapple juice and the juice from the jar of maraschino cherries. Stir together. Garnish with the maraschino cherries, pineapple rings and orange wedges. Chill until ready to serve.

In an old fashioned glass, combine the sugar, 1 cherry, 1 orange slice, the bitters and the soda water. Muddle the ingredients together in the glass until the sugar is completely dissolved. Add the rye and a couple ice cubes. Garnish with the remaining cherry and orange slice.

Place the eggs in a large saucepan. Add enough water to cover them by 1 inch. Bring the water to a boil, then cover the pan and remove it from the heat. Let the pan sit for 12 minutes, then drain the eggs and run under cold water until they are cool enough to handle. Peel the eggs.

Cut each egg in half lengthwise and carefully remove the yolks, collecting them in a food processor. Set the whites aside on a serving platter.

To the yolks, add the ham, mayonnaise, mustard, Worcestershire sauce, onion powder, pickle and hot sauce. Pulse the mixture until mostly smooth, then season with salt and pepper.

Spoon the yolk mixture into a zip-close plastic bag. Use scissor to snip off one of the bottom corners about 1/2 inch up. Pipe the filling into each egg white. Garnish with a pinch of paprika and chopped parsley.

In a small bowl, mix together the cream cheese, French dressing, grated onion, chopped pickle and chopped olives. Spoon the mixture into each of the celery ribs, then arrange them on a serving platter. Garnish with parsley and celery leaves.

Brush each slice of baguette on both sides with some of the melted butter. Arrange on a rimmed baking sheet, then season lightly with salt and pepper. Bake for 6 to 7 minutes, or until toasted and lightly golden.

In a small bowl, whisk together the lemon juice, Dijon mustard, hot sauce and olive oil. Gently stir in the chopped pimento, avocado cubes and crab meat.

Arrange the baguette slices on a serving platter. Top each with some of the avocado and crab salad.