In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be positive all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people.

For decades we've been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F*ck positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let's be honest, shit is f*cked, and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn't sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is - a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck is his antidote to the coddling, let's-all-feel-good mind-set that has infected modern society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up.

Manson makes the argument, backed by both academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited - "not everybody can be extraordinary; there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault". Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek.

There are only so many things we can give a f*ck about, so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

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I have to say, i read a sample of the start of this book and i was absolutely hooked!!! I could not have downloaded it on my kindle fast enough. It was witty, relatable and a real page turner. Unfortunately, soon after the first chapter, i really had to force myself to keep reading the book. To me, it lacked substance and intrigue, and the message probably could have been summed up in an article rather than an entire book. It's not that i didnt agree with the message of the book because the author makes some absolutely spot on points. I was dissapointed that i only got glimpses of the author. I felt that the book could have been more personal from his perspective instead of constantly referencing stories of other people in the past. It just made it hard to get stuck into because, at times, it felt like you were reading a series of somewhat relevant short stories that were tied together with a repetitive message. Sorry.

The language and the example used in Chapter 1 kinda triggered me if I’m honest. I reminded myself to keep an open mind because I’ve heard good reviews (and we shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover.. or it’s first chapter!). From the 2nd chapter onward, the book just gets better and better. The content and substance of the book reveals itself to be fantastic. I understand that the title of the book and maybe even the first chapter is playing on sensationalism to get a different kind of audience interested in and reading this content that is vitally important and truly valuable to us all. I’ll read this one again and again. Highly recommended reading.

Stabbing into the dark recesses of our minds and revealing our motivations, Mark sheds light on the values that we hold and which of them cause us problems. He reveals the real problem with the young generation and how it can be fixed. And finally he helps us see what to care about and how to really live.

This book kept popping up in my environment and finally I took the hint and bought it - now I know why the universe wanted me to read it. Thanks universe and thanks Mark for the best book I've read for ages.

There are many aspects of the books I liked but I found some of it somewhat contradictory. Mark speaks with alot of passion and enthusiasm which is great. HOWEVER, he fails to back up alot of his points with hard facts, and rather tells particular stories that validate his points. There are of course, countless other stories that would disprove his arguments.

The book is essential Mark Manson's opinions on life. Some of it is fantastic, but other parts are just opinion. He always swears a little too much for my liking!

Wasn't sure what I felt at first. Once I realised he wasn't talking about NOT caring but about not caring too much about stupid things and people that suck our energy and waste our time - I really enjoyed it. Had a few laughs along the way and it helped me clarify who and what I give a F about and why. Great read without being too heavy or deep.

People NEED this book. It's eye-opening, thought-provoking, and above all, brutally honest. I have thought of these concepts before on a very abstract level, but having them put into words like this is a transformative experience. You will learn to look at your life in a different way, you will learn to understand how deeply rooted some problems can be, and you will learn how to deal with them. Interestingly enough, this book was very existential for me and really struck a chord, allowing things to really sink in and make sense. Honestly, reading this book has given me clarity in terms of relationships, thoughts, struggles, happiness and life itself. Do yourself a favor, read this book.

I liked it, as the author says it's a bit messy at times, throwing in different wisdoms about life, death, values etc. Moving from funny to serious, philosophical to Hollywood, personal to fictional, it is not for those who seek a structured read with a clear leitmotiv. Some bits made me laugh, others made me cry and some made me think, but now and then I scanned words as the pace slowed down , too descriptive in details and made my attention wane.

I really enjoyed this book. Many reviews are far too critical of his discussion around his sexual experiences and drug use that they miss his points of personal growth entirely. His message combines concepts from Zen Buddhism, stoicism, minimalism and other philosophies that focus on living in the moment, directing your attention to things worthy of your time and not obsessing over things outside of your control. I'll definitely be keeping this book on hand

Top international reviews

k troughton

3.0 out of 5 starsIt's good but.

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 7 September 2018

Verified Purchase

Five stars for content, one for style. There's a fad at the moment that says any book in the self help genre has to have a catchy phrase and that it must be repeated ad nauseum (presumably to prove the value of the phrase). This book falls into that particular trap and in the end it just feels like you're being tortured by repetition. Trust me, there's nothing subtle about it! It's a shame, there are important things to read here but the overuse of particular words and phrases is both tedious and mind numbing. A broader vocabulary and a less aggressive style would improve matters immeasurably.

What's that? A book changed my life? Nonsense!! Well, actually that's true, it DID change my life. Here's a very long review which I feel needs to be addressed, as many people don't know what the book is about, give it a 1-star rating and shrug it off as a money-grab scheme using foul language as a means to bait audiences. Which I honestly first thought it was.

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I have to admit, I wasn't convinced (ignorant, you could say) of all these self-help books people lavish over, I honestly thought it was a load of hippy crap as a means to make a quick buck... Although after a bout of depression last year (yea the "D" word get's thrown around alot these days), I myself was seeking out therapy. I was recommended this author and discovered this book. After asking myself "If this doesn't work, I'll just try something else" I figured I had nothing to lose.

And WOW. This book really changed my perspective on things and ultimately I feel much better and improved! Not 100%, but I'm getting there slowly.

As you could tell from the title, the author isn't shy of using profanity, and I like this. I've read other self-help books and while they're good and all, Mark Manson really engages you on a personal level. Imagine going to the doctor, and he's been all professional... but a tad boring and nearly sends you to sleep. Now imagine the same doctor taking you to the bar, having a pint and a laugh, but telling you the same advice. Who would you connect with better? Yea, I thought so.

Controversial title aside, the book isn't about just not giving a damn, but about focusing WHAT to not give a damn about. Stop getting stressed about by what the media (and others) want us to be, not getting worked up by social media, stuff like that. Instead, focus the damns on the important stuff: family, friends, your well being.

The book does take a while to pick up, with the early chapters focusing on examples of people who you may or may not relate to, or even care about. It can start to drag on, but eventually, Mr. Manson really dives into the meat of the book, and asks yourself to challenge your beliefs. Knowing that you're not always right all the time. Not denying your own flaws by redirecting the blame onto other people when challenged (many people are guilty of this). Acknowledging you're not perfect and rolling with it. Realising your emotions and problems aren't exclusive: nearly everyone in the world will have experienced what you felt at some point in their lives.

Real stuff that actually helps you come to terms with yourself and not inflating your ego, or doing some tantric yoga exercises to unlock your inner chi circles. Real stuff.

I consider this book my bible: I read certain parts every now and then to maintain my self improvement, it gives me solace during times where I'm feeling down, and I harrass my Instagram followers by posting snippets of the pages. I've even brought several copies for friends who were going through a rough time.

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TLDR: this book helped me out, connects with you on an unconventional level, and ultimately offers brilliant advice that helps improve yourself and hopefully others around you. Highly recommended!

PS. It's a MASSIVE shame that certain individuals refuse to fully read the book due to liberal use of the F word. I'd say that's the whole point: letting go of your "I'm entitled so I'm offended" beliefs and challenging yourself to overcome this personal stigma to improve your outlook on life.

This book is a game changer. It makes you think in a way you never have.. Must read for people who think they are depressed, 'something is wrong with me',, 'why me' type of questions.. Trust me there is nothing wrong with you.. an eye opener for me truly. Just order it already !!!

One of the worst books I’ve ever read. I didn’t like the author’s aggressive and sarcastic tone, and it felt like he was just repeating himself over and over again. Gave up after the first 3 chapters as found it impossible to concentrate on

Overrated. Didn't like it much. There were times I felt the author is contradicting himself. In the first few pages he tries hard to convey the message that you are plain average but towards the end of the book he conveys the opposite - that you are special :) It is different from other self-help books in the way that it doesn't glorify you as someone who is unique and one of a kind. He says that feeling entitled is the reason why people care about unimportant things the way they do. So don't get confused by the title (like I did), the entire book is more about how to not take yourself so seriously.

P.S: If you are looking to feel good, this might not be your cup of tea.

I am a very liberal minded person and purchased this book as a recommendation with another book I bought. It is poorly written, crude and totally illogical. It appears as a twenty-something individual trying to sound like a senior giving life advice based on reading social media while inserting as many crude words as possible as if that adds credibility- it doesn’t. There is not a single original idea in it. After I finished reading it, I wouldn’t even donate it or pass it on. It went into the recycling bin. Pure trash. I have no idea where any of the positive reviews came from unless they were paid for.

A great read. A very entertaining romp through philosophical thought by a skilled wordsmith, but I would say the age cut-off for this book is 50. Beyond 50, you've probably already learned most of the lessons in this book the hard way, however, I can see where it can be extremely helpful for a generation that spends most of its waking hours posting narcissistic selfies on their iphones. Manson gives you the blueprints to get your head out of your ass, (or out of your phone) take a hard look at yourself and the real world around you, and shed many of the illusions you've been slowly poisoning your life with. If you're a millennial, or even a disenchanted X-gen, pick up this book. It will give you at least a more healthy point of view. But, if you're over 50, you're not going to find anything new in here except entertainment.

Do you know that feeling you get when it’s last call at the club, the lights come on and you get a chance to *really* look at that person you were dancing with and it’s not a pleasant sight and you want to get away as soon as possible?

That’s kinda how this book made me feel. The clever title, like the low lights in a bar, masks the fact that this book offers no real substance while the author simply brags about his good fortune in life. A few chapters in, “the lights come on” and you just feel kinda icky.

I almost didn't read this book because of some of the negative reviews; however, I am glad I did. I initially thought that this book was going to have the direction of "don't care about ANYTHING at all", but that's not the case. It mostly discusses defining proper values for yourself; what you should and shouldn't care about, and why. It was a short read, but still enjoyable, I may go through it again at some point. A lot of self help books seem to try to get you to look at things more positively, which for me seems to end up in ignoring the problem/negative feelings because I have buried it with a false sense of positivity I don't really believe. One major thing I liked that was discussed in this book versus some of the other "self help" books I read is that it talks about accepting some of your own flaws, some things can't be sugar coated. The approaches mentioned in this book seem better suited to actually dealing with your issues and coming up with new life values centered around your own happiness and well being. Well worth the read if you are looking to give your head a shake.

"We realize that we're never going to cure cancer or go to the moon or feel Jennifer Aniston's tits"...this sums up just how poor this book is. If you like the vacuous ramblings of someone who writes like a wannabe writer for Loaded lad's mag then you'll like this. It has nothing of any worth in it, repeats the same point over and over again and tries desperately hard to be funny. No scientific evidence, just anecdotal sweary drivel. The F word is so over used that it starts to grate. I'm annoyed at myself for wasting my money and time. I didn't bother finishing it.

Sexist book. I read it. The whole thing. I noticed the only time woman were mentioned was in a sexually demeaning way. He even mentions his womans need for his approval when it comes to dressing herself.I didn't find it inspiring or helpful. It terms of packaging it did come on time. However I wouldnt recommend it. Sorry.

This is one book that would definitely catch your eye, owing to its bright orange cover and a title that’s so unconventional! Kudos to Mark Manson for this! I don't think I'd have picked this up otherwise.

Okay. First things first, whether you like the book or not, whether you take anything substantial away from this book or not, whether you implement any wisdom described in the book in your life or not, I think you would definitely enjoy the way this book is written, its language and the general fun feeling of reading through a book, which I would safely put in the genre of ‘Unconventional Wisdom’.

I loved reading this book! I think it’s very relatable, the way the author has described various instances and examples. However, implementing the same attitude in your life might be tricky and difficult. If you can implement it the way the author intends to, I think you would be on your path to a successful life. I think this book is especially useful for people who keep worrying about trivial things way too much. The book will teach you to focus on larger things and don’t care about petty stuff that has no meaning or effect on your life.

The book will also teach you to embrace mediocrity because admit it, not everyone is going to be great. But it also teaches you that such acceptance is the first step towards achieving something better, if not something great.

However, I think the book’s target audience is the younger generation, young adults. The book will make you realize some things which you already know but you couldn’t admit to yourself. Some parts would be extremely funny, just because of the way certain things are described and put together in the book. Some other parts would be really enlightening. Also, there would be times when the author reminisces about his past, which can get slightly boring and dragging, even exaggerated.

Some of my favorite quotes from the book:- “People who become great at something become great because they understand that they’re not already great - they are mediocre, they are average - and that they could be so much better.”- “You always get to choose how you see things, how you react to things, how you value things.”- “If you’re stuck on a problem, don’t sit there and think about it, just start working on it. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing, the simple act of working on it will eventually cause the right ideas to show up in your head.”- “You too are going to die, and that’s because you too were fortunate enough to have lived.”- “Pain, in all of its forms, is our body’s most effective means of spurring action.”- “Not giving a f does not mean being indifferent, it means being comfortable with being different.”

To conclude, I would recommend this one to my fellow readers (or non-readers). Cheers!