10 reasons why you should never hire me as your Hungarian translator

Possibly the most annoying post I will ever write

You seen so many meaningless and trite articles written by companies about why are they the best choice for you when it comes about buying something from them. Reading these articles is a waste of time since you will never learn anything important from these articles about the company. I hate wasting time, and I would never waste yours, so let's go straight to the point. I will show you how could I be the worst choice of Hungarian translator for you.

Warning! You are leaving your comfort zone.

1. I have an annoyingly keen eye on details

Did you hope that you will just shoot out the source file and receive it back, translated, within a couple of days and without any comments or questions, so you can tick off one more item on your to-do list? You are wrong. If you are so negligent about outsourcing jobs, chances are high that I might ask some questions about the project in order to deliver a high quality Hungarian translation. What is the target audience? Can you clarify the inconsistencies I found in the source text? From the several possible Hungarian translation of some terms could you please pick one – after you read the detailed explanations I provided for each alternative? Do you need a Translation Memory as well? Do you have any request to use a specific CAT? These are just some of the questions what you might face when you pick me as your Hungarian translator.

2. Prices are too low for any shady business

My prices are so low that there is simply no room for kickback, the numbers simply do not add up. And this is just the mathematical aspect , there is also the old-school Code of Ethics I follow and live by as a professional Hungarian translator. Yes, I know, after reading the latest articles about the corruption raging on in Hungary, this might be surprising for you. Consider me a dinosaur or an individual of an endangered species, I don’t care. If you were hoping that I will listen and understand your smooth and smart talk about the possibility to increase my price, then you came to the wrong street. I am not the droid you are looking for.

3. Delivery is unpleasantly fast

The return of the translated text will be unusually quick, since there are no middlemen and intermediaries to complicate and slow down the process. This makes impossible to have a couple of lazy days in the office, claiming to your boss that you are unable to proceed with the project since the translator is still working on the Hungarian translation. Not even a large project will win you some relaxed days: I might commit the outrageous crime of sending back each separate files as they are finished, so you will have something to do and process further every single day.

4. My engineering knowledge may match your own

Perhaps until now you had the upper hand and you could look down on your translator, demonstrating your engineering knowledge by throwing in industry jargon here and there. Now this situation might easily turn upside down. I am not a linguist who became a technical translator, but an engineer who became a translator. Do not consider me a soggy loaf of bread, the usual stock of translator, with a soft creamy Bachelor of Arts filling and a thin engineering crust, but the other way: a hardcore engineer, who learnt all the soft skills necessary for translation. But hey, what do you except from a geek, who after an usual, busy workday literally dreams about semi-automatic pneumohydraulic gearboxes and builds a CO2 laser engraver just for fun?

5. You might be not my biggest client

Your company might seem insignificant next to giants like General Electric, 3M, Johnson & Johnson or Mercedes, companies I worked with before. You might have difficulties to understand and accept that no matter how big or small you are, if you are the global market leader or a one man operation, I treat all my customers equally and fairly. You will be given exactly the same quality of Hungarian translation service as the big guys – which could be a small, but important step to close the gap between you and them.

6. You will have to learn a lot of nonsense translation industry jargon

Translation are not like in the good old times, when secluded monks spent endless nights in their candlelit cells to translate those codices. You will have to learn outlandish terms like Fuzzy Matches, Translation Memory, Term Extraction or 101% In-context Match. You will also have difficulties to understand what is the difference between Machine Translation and Computer Aided Translation, and why is the first a big, red, flashing NO for me, while the second is an industry standard.

7. My confidentiality might overwrite your media stunt plans

Did you hope that your sensitive documents will be leaked and you can get some publicity by yelling around that your data have been pwned? Did you hope to get some extra income by suing your translator for mistreating your sensitive data? LOL. I got bad news. So far as you counted on me to achieve this goal, it will never happen. I follow strict confidentiality practices, and I stick to these under all conditions. End of story.

8. Disturbingly good quality

Are you looking at your clients as the stereotype, simple-minded, dirty handed, rural-raised, low-life orc-troll crossbreed rednecks who can hardly speak their own native language beside primitive growls? Did you think that any documentation will be good for them, filled up by random, seemingly Hungarian body of text, since your only purpose is to meet the minimal legal requirements for product documentation? I have bad news: the Hungarian translation delivered by me will the best quality in terms of grammar, spelling and technical accuracy. Yes, it even might include complex sentences stretching multiple lines and industry specific terms understood only by engineers of that area.

9. I might ask too many annoying questions

Let’s say that several years ago you paid some beans to a nameless copywriter to make your original product documentation. Since that, despite regular product updates, you put minimal efforts to keep it up-to-date, making only ad-hoc modifications here and there. Now it is full of inconsistencies and factual errors which make it difficult to interpret. Unfortunately, delivering a good quality Hungarian translation starts with perfectly understanding the source document, so you might face some disturbing, deeply technical questions from your Hungarian translator. Provided you make the mistake of choosing me.

10. I might refuse to take a job

Did you hope that anyone posing as a translator in some random freelancer portal will take any job if it matches their language combination (or, most likely, he made up such a language combination in his profile just before applying for your job offer), and the responsibility of selecting the translator? If so, and since you bumped into this website, you are knocking on the door of the Hungarian translator least suitable for you. I will refuse any job if it does not match my experience, I am not available within the timeframe available for the job, or if there is any condition which might prevent me to delivering you a top quality Hungarian translation service. However, if I confirm your Hungarian translation project, you can be sure that you will get the best service available on the market.

I hope I annoyed you because none of these scenarios is true for you.Now it is time to release your anger.These nice big blue buttons here serve this purpose.