Good evening, folks, and welcome to “What U Think Its a Snake or a Hand!” America’s favorite game of deduction! It takes a keen eye and a deep knowledge of the human anatomy. Let’s bring out our first contestant!

Well, I think it’s pretty safe to say it’s certainly NOT a fucking snake? Really? Human anatomy aside….somebody is clearly confused when attempting to identify the difference between serpentes and carnivorous land mammals…”omgz…I was on safari in the Africans and our landrover got chaseded by two giant hairy snakes with claws and big teef n junk and stuff, and den wen we stoped, dey hoped on da hood and startid dewing it! omg dey cud’ve slithered in da windoes end we could have gotten bited an dere wuznt ne antevemon for lyke a hundrid killmeters!”….

Then again, snakes aside…It’s obvious this fella, Teen Swag, has a serious issue in not being able to distinguish the difference between a hand, and a pussy!….painted on a…paw…a dirty…dirty…paw…

@6 Ahh, but the strawberries that’s … that’s where you had them. They laughed at you and made jokes but you proved beyond the shadow of a doubt and with … geometric logic … that a duplicate key to the wardroom icebox DID exist, and you’d have produced that key if they hadn’t of pulled the Caine out of action, aye Cap’n?

So it seems Some misguided sailors on this ship still think they can pull a fast one on me. (and of course, by that, I be speaking of Ensign Rightbrain3,) Well, they’re very much mistaken. (I behold the power of google!) Since you’ve taken this course, the innocent will be punished with the guilty. There will be no liberty for any member of this crew for three months. I will not be made a fool of! Do you hear me?