On last night's episode of Toddlers & Tiaras, we spent a lot of time with Madison, the ten-year-old diva whose stage name is "Tootie." "Tootie" is a bitch.

She wasn't the only pageant girl the episode focused on, but she completely overshadowed the other girls, due to her haughty, holier-than-thou demeanor and overbearing, demanding relationship with her mother.

The thing is, her mother feeds into Tootie's inflated sense of ego: Her mother calls herself "Tootie's assistant." She "fetches" things for Tootie, does her toes and spray tans. (Madison, on the other hand, is a down-to-earth girl who is happy to play soccer with her dad while wearing jeans. Madison and Tootie are different, even though they are the same kid.)

When Tootie is in "Tootie mode," you had best not call her Madison. Also, she is completely cheesy. Not only did was her "Indian" dance offensive to Native Americans, it was offensive to dancers.

Tootie's mom is basically an enabler; she actually thinks that her bratty little snot of a daughter has a "good attitude." The crazy thing is, Tootie is a little manipulator. She's playing a game.

When asked about her competition — the other girls — Tootie replied, "I don't know. I don't care about 'em." But then smirked. She thinks she is slick.

But actually, in the end, though Tootie won Supreme Queen, she didn't win any of the other big prizes — not Beauty Queen, nor one of the three puppies the pageant was giving away. She's been told she's gorgeous and amazing, so she doesn't seem to know what to think or do when she doesn't succeed. The interviewer asked, "Were you happy when your name was called?" Because, you know, at least she won something. But her face was a twisted mask of confusion and she could only say, "I dunno." And then: "No." Followed by: "Don't put that on TV."

Part of the problem might be that at home, Tootie's picture is on the same level as that of Jesus Christ.