And just how much does Bay love money? For starters, the whole point of Transformers 4is for Hasbro to invent a brand new line of toys for Bay to base his robots on, because executives admitted that the last two films sold no toys. But that should hardly surprise anyone – even the rumor that there won’t even be an Optimus Prime – and neither should the latest news that Bay will choose an assistant for the 4th film from the contestants in a Doritos Super Bowl commercial. *makes explosion sound, chugs Mountain Dew*

The filmmaker is partnering with Doritos for the company’s Crash the Super Bowl contest, which allows aspiring filmmakers to create homemade commercials for the snack chip brand, with the two finalist ads airing during the Super Bowl in January. (Via The Hollywood Reporter)

That’s right, if you have a computer and movie making software, you can make your own Doritos commercial and parlay that into helping to produce a massive motion picture. And it’s cool, because Bay totally respects the dreamers and the schemers.

“When you find out where these guys came from…its great,” Bay says. “If you want to get noticed, this is the way to do it.”

One finalist in the seventh-annual competition will be selected via an online poll and the other by the Doritos team. Bay will also act as a judge. (He declined to say what he’s looking for, although he promises to be a “tough judge.”)

Oh man, he’s going to make them wash so many Ferraris. But surely Bay is speaking from experience here, as he must have a convenient-yet-vague anecdote that he can throw out to totally validate this as anything other than another shameless example that money is the only thing that matters to him.

Bay recalled how years ago a barista at the Starbucks he frequented would pepper him with moviemaking questions. One day, he spotted the barista at his company and was told that the kid, an aspiring filmmaker, was a new hire.

“He wanted to quit on Pearl Harbor!” Bay recalls. “And I said, ‘You are not quitting. This is the best education you are going to get.’ And now he is a director.” (He wouldn’t say who.)

The reporter asked a few times for Bay to give up the name of his mystery coffee server that we’ve never heard of before and who has never told his own amazing story, but the director threw down a smoke bomb, laughed maniacally and flew away on his real life Transformer dragon.

Transformers is back and more XXXtreme than ever! Think you were terrified of Megatron? That guy was a pussy! You’ll shit yourself when you see DORITOS LOCOBOT ™, the ranch flavored robot that grows in strength as wild diarrhea spreads throughout the world’s population. Not enough loco taco for you yet? It stars Amanda Bynes!

I figure they’re going for the second generation guys they introduced in the 1986 movies. Which is just going to be absurd. The only reason I like that season is that the dialogue has some real winners, like Ultra Magnus’ “It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen…alright, give me the bomb”