Philip Patston's Bloghttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/
Blog archivehttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/blog-archive/
<h4><strong>As of 15 December 2017, I will be blogging directly on <a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank">www.diversitynz.com/</a></strong></h4>
<p style="text-align: center;"><strong><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage400174-Ournetwork-DiversityNewZealandPhilipPatston.png" width="400" height="174" alt="" title=""/></a><br/></strong></p>
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<p>I've been reflecting on the aggressive change in the tone of a lot of online publishing and social media. It seems to me that, while online trolls are nothing new, their volume and voracity have increased profoundly since Donald Trump became the so-called leader of the free world.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550412-nbc-fires-donald-trump-after-he-calls-mexicans-rapists-and-drug-runners.jpg" width="550" height="412" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">In short, in just over a year, Trump seems to have normalised fake news, hatred and bullying on the internet. I'd go further to say that he has popularised it.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">It has become almost unsensational to see people ruthlessly posting their opinions on an issue as fact, then personally attacking anyone who disagrees or points out that opinion is not actually fact. Lies and hearsay get twisted into meaningless defensiveness, all in a bid to confirm biases, be right and discredit others.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">It's ugly, it's stupid and we are becoming desensitised to the point of not caring. How will this lack of courtesy and respect impact on our children?</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: 14px;">I think we all have a responsibility to starve of oxygen people who hide behind blogs and social media in order to vent their anger, envy and narcissism. Don't engage. Block them. Don't feed their fantasies of being important.</span></p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: 14px;">Don't let them think they are somehow as entitled as Trump to voice their opinion as fact. One's enough.</span></p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Tue, 05 Dec 2017 13:55:13 +1300http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-trump-era-of-online-lies-fake-news-and-bad-behaviour/Why I've changed my mind about entering local body politicshttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/why-i-ve-changed-my-mind-about-entering-local-body-politics/
<p>People have been telling me for 20 years I should be in politics. For 20 years I've recoiled in horror, saying I wouldn't be seen dead in politics — in fact, I remember saying at a comedy gig once to shoot me if I did.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/City-Vision-logo-300-300x224-1.jpg" alt="City Vision logo" width="295" height="108" title=""/></p>
<p>I was just joking.</p>
<p>In March this year, I applied and was selected to be on Auckland Council's Disability Advisory Panel. In May I was elected chair. I also joined the NZ Green Party. A few weeks ago a City Vision member suggested I nominate my self for selection as a candidate for the February Waitematā Local Board by-election.</p>
<p>If you're free at 7pm on Wednesday, please come and be part of the public vote to support me at <a href="https://www.google.co.nz/maps/place/Auckland+Horticultural+Council/@-36.8681028,174.7168047,17z/data=!4m18!1m12!4m11!1m3!2m2!1d174.7280914!2d-36.8616479!1m6!1m2!1s0x6d0d47106654598d:0xdf6ebf42dfa68488!2sHorticultural+Building,+Great+North+Rd,+Western+Springs!2m2!1d174.7189956!2d-36.8681233!3m4!1s0x6d0d47106654598d:0xdf6ebf42dfa68488!8m2!3d-36.8681233!4d174.7189956" target="_blank">Horticultural Building, Great North Rd, Western Springs</a>.</p>
<p>Last week I nominated myself and the selection meeting is Wednesday evening. So, what's changed?</p>
<p>I think the main reason is that having been deeply involved in leadership for the last decade, I've seen a disturbing lack of good leadership in politics. I once had the chance to ask a senior MP this: If democracy is, as Winston Churchill famously said (but apparently didn’t coin the phrase), " the worst form of government, except for all the others," what conversations are you and colleagues having about improving it? His answer: "Well it's not that bad."</p>
<p>I found the glib answer disappointing, a bit offensive but more so, cowardly because leadership is so much about having courageous conversations, critically analysing systems and processes and being genuinely committed to and curious about change and improvement.</p>
<p>I also know several political leaders, however, who are courageous, critical, committed and curious, whom I admire and want to support and to work alongside.</p>
<p>Another reason I want to approach the political arena is that there are too few people in my demographic doing so — and I realise I can't go on rooting for the few who do from the sidelines. So I need to throw my hat in the ring. I've proved myself in business, entertainment, entrepreneurship and social enterprise — I can make it in politics too. But to do so I'll need to change the culture of politics, because there are some things about the way you do things around here now that won't work for me, just like the other sectors I've worked in.</p>
<p>I strongly believe the lack of gender, cultural, functional, sexual and other diversity in leadership isn't the issue. The problem is that the culture of leadership, in all spheres, is set by white, middle-class, cis-normative, heterosexual men (and Mai Chen). Change that culture and you'll see diversity of a kind you wouldn't believe existed. And Mai and the boys will probably enjoy their lives more too.</p>
<p>I am not a two trick pony, either. Sure I'm non-heterosexual and have access needs, but I'm also a white, middle-class bloke too. So, in the shadow of Joni Mitchell, I've looked at life from both sides. If I'm selected and elected, you won't just hear me banging on about ramps and rainbow flags. I want to see less poverty, homelessness, violence, pollution and discrimination. I want to see more meaningful employment, environmental sustainability, community cohesion, neighbourhood connectedness, green space and bike lanes.</p>
<p>And I want to see more ramps and rainbow flags, too. But not too many flags — I have flag issues, but that's another conversation.</p>
<p>I know Auckland's issues are complex — and I love complexity. Complexity is like raising a child — every time you see them they've changed because they've interacted with another person, environment and experience. How interesting is that? (And tiresome — a friend's daughter lived with me from age 14 to 18.) The solutions aren't simple, like baking a cake, but they're not complicated either, like building Elon Musk's Mars colonial transporter.</p>
<p>Leading in complex environments requires creativity, commitment, confidence, humility, generosity, the ability to realise you're wrong (because just being wrong feels like being right), agility, humour and resilience. It never ends — it's what humanity creates and complexity won't end until humanity does.</p>
<p>If I'm selected and elected, I am committed to working with my colleagues to address Auckland's issues head-on and realistically, collaboratively and collectively, representatively and respectfully, innovatively and discerningly. But also, I expect to have fun, to laugh and play, modelling a way of approaching life's challenges constructively, lightly and hopefully.</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Mon, 13 Nov 2017 18:26:22 +1300http://www.philippatston.com/blog/why-i-ve-changed-my-mind-about-entering-local-body-politics/The greatest obstacle to diversity and inclusionhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-greatest-obstacle-to-diversity-and-inclusion/
<p>I recently received a request from a graduate student at Purdue University in the U.S.A. They are currently researching inclusion and diversity and wanted to interview me. Here are my responses...</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/obstacle.png" alt="man pushing large rock" width="550" height="357" title=""/></p>
<h4>What was your “why” for entering diversity as a career?</h4>
<p>Because I wanted to deepen awareness of diversity in creative, fun, non-threatening ways. My passion is leading change that embraces curiosity and inquiry into diversity, complexity and uncertainty. My vision is a society where all people freely share and celebrate identity and self-expression.</p>
<h4>What were your challenges when entering the field?</h4>
<p>To begin with, in the late 1990s, I tried to market myself to the business/corporate community, but businesses weren't ready. As a person with access needs, I think I was also subject to the "soft bigotry of low expectations". I eventually gave up on the business/corporate market and focussed on the social profit, education and Government sectors, which is where I work mainly now. Interestingly I have had a few corporate clients recently, so maybe the appetite in this market is growing, finally!</p>
<h4>What inspired your entry into the field?</h4>
<p>As a gay, disabled, white man, I was interested in moving away from the power politics of diversity, because, depending on context, I am both oppressed and oppressor. I realised that, predominantly, political labels are used to discount voices (in groups of white, non-disabled straight men, I was just the "gay disabled guy"; but in groups of disabled, lesbian feminists of colour, I was the oppressive "white guy".) So I was inspired to create a new discourse around diversity, based on a new definition of diversity being the synergy of our uniqueness and commonality. This creates a more inquisitive response to diversity, rather than a fear or disdain of difference, or an assumption that we're all the same.</p>
<h4>What were your educational and career paths which led you to work in diversity education and training?</h4>
<p>After leaving high school I started a degree in psychology, sociology and philosophy. I dropped out halfway through and trained and worked as a telephone counsellor. I then retrained as a social worker, worked at the Human Rights Commission and "fell into" a 12-year career as a professional comedian, travelling and performing in both the mainstream comedy circuit on New Zealand and the disability and queer arts scenes in Australia, Canada and the UK. Meanwhile, I started my company, Diversity New Zealand, and a social profit organisation, Diversityworks Trust. I was also offered places on social and creative entrepreneur programmes. So diverse educational and career paths and an interest in changing the thinking and rhetoric about diversity is what got me where I am today.</p>
<h4>What type of cross-cultural or diversity/inclusion research would be most helpful to you in your role? For example, a university asks your advice for research projects for graduate students in cultural anthropology. What would you suggest for study that would benefit your projects?</h4>
<p>I think the most interesting research for me would be looking at the cultural and lifestyle intersectionality of, in particular, western society. I don't think we're aware of quite how diverse we have become. We still see ourselves in identity silos – gender, race, sexuality, function etc – and yet I don't think I know anyone who doesn't identify with more than one of these aspects.</p>
<h4>Which of your accomplishments is the one that provides you with the most satisfaction?</h4>
<p>Can I say two?! Firstly, my decision, when I left the Human Rights Commission, to start my own business. Secondly, being recognised as a top ten diversity consultant in the Global Diversity List in 2015 and 2016.</p>
<h4>What do you enjoy most about your work (and which of your previous roles)? Why?</h4>
<p>The diversity and the people with whom I work. I get bored very easily so I love how varied my work is – public speaking, facilitation, leadership, innovation. I'm also grateful that, as a business owner, I can employ and work with people love. Most, if not all, my colleagues and clients are friends and that makes working feel like playing (I call it "plorking"!)</p>
<h4>Which projects interest you the most (ones you feel most passionate about)?</h4>
<p>I am a futurist so I enjoy working on projects that are innovative, uncertain and change-focused. One of my clients is developing an innovation lab and I'm part of a team developing the methodology by creating different future scenarios. It's fascinating, fun and hugely rewarding.</p>
<h4>What are some of your frustrating/challenging moments during your work? Why?</h4>
<p>One of my biggest frustrations is the narrowness of the lens through which diversity is viewed. The conversations we have about diversity are so one dimensional – usually, it's just about women and, if you're lucky, indigenous or ethnic minorities. Diversity is so much wider and more complex than single identity categories – as I said earlier, it doesn't exist in silos. We need to be so much more courageous in our conversations.</p>
<h4>What do you feel are your greatest strengths that help you be successful in your field?</h4>
<p>I think my strengths lie in being curious, comfortable with complexity and uncertainty, willing to be wrong and holding things lightly with humour and fun. I also think my ability to see both the positive and negative consequence of any beliefs and actions is a strength – diversity is paradoxical and needs to be understood as such.</p>
<h4>Which interdisciplinary studies/training would be useful in your role (for example, business, political science, etc.)? Why?</h4>
<p>I'm really interested in design thinking. I think there's a huge need to redesign systems and structures and human-centred design principles are crucial to ensure diversity is valued meaningfully.</p>
<h4>What are the greatest obstacles to diversity and inclusion, today, in your personal opinion?</h4>
<p>Firstly, the "dark" side of civil rights movements is that they shift shame from the minority to the majority. Dr Brené Brown's work on shame and vulnerability shows that people are unable to change if they feel shame because change requires the ability to be vulnerable and, catch 22, you can't be vulnerable if you feel shame.</p>
<p>Brown refers to "shame webs" and I think a large shame web has been created among people with privilege. I think there is a large backlash developing against diversity as a result of this shame. The "unheard voices" rhetoric Trump used in his campaign and his subsequent election are evidence of this growing backlash.</p>
<p>For me, the answer is forgiveness, which requires generosity. I've witnessed several instances of the majority humbly apologising to minorities over the wrongs of the past in the last few decades. But have minorities been forgiving? I don't think we have – and there's still a lot of shaming going on by minority groups.</p>
<p>I'm not implying things are fine – there's still a lot of work to be done to address inequality and discrimination. And I'd like to see more generosity among underprivileged groups to forgive the privileged.</p>
<p>Having said that, the majority needs to own the backlash and stop hiding behind newly created euphemisms like unconscious bias, confirmation bias and <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/casual-racism-er-no/">casual racism</a>.</p>
<p>We're all part of the problem and we're all part of the solution. The greatest obstacle to diversity and inclusion is us not recognising this and failing to work together to design a better world for everyone.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: left;"><a href="https://www.diversitynz.com/subscribe" target="_blank">Subscribe to this and other blogs at DiversityNZ.com</a></h4>
<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Wed, 18 Oct 2017 16:43:16 +1300http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-greatest-obstacle-to-diversity-and-inclusion/Casual racism? Er, nohttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/casual-racism-er-no/
<p>Long time no blog. <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/limp-wrist/">My wrist</a> is slowly healing, however, <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-metaphor-of-an-on-screen-keyboard/">typing is still arduous</a>. I was recently asked to contribute to an <a href="http://www.hrmonline.co.nz/news/no-such-thing-as-casual-racism-at-work-241790.aspx" target="_blank">article</a> on casual racism for an Australian publisher, so I thought I'd make the most of it and paste my responses. Hopefully I'll be back to blogging regularly in a few weeks.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550366-discrimination.png" width="550" height="366" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p><strong>Do you think casual racism still exists in many Kiwi workplaces?</strong></p>
<p>To begin with, I think it’s important, from a diversity perspective, to recognise that discrimination exists in many contexts, including gender, race, sexuality, class, function (disability) etc. Often people discriminate on more than one ground.</p>
<p>Secondly, terms like 'casual racism’, 'unconscious bias’ and 'confirmation bias’ seem to have become commonly used as euphemisms for what is essentially discrimination. This allows people to discount their discriminatory behaviour as something that they are not aware of and therefore not take responsibility for it.</p>
<p>So, to answer your question – casual racism, or as I like to call it, racism, does exist in Kiwi workplaces. The real issue is, in my opinion, lack of awareness and self-awareness, combined with a neo-liberal tendency to minimise the impact of it through euphemism.</p>
<p><strong>What are some examples of casual racism that employees and leaders often overlook?</strong></p>
<p>A recent example of 'casual’ racism that I heard about was that of a Māori woman who was told off for swearing 'too much’ in her cis, white, male-dominated workplace. As she saw it, she was being targeted by white male expectations that Māori women shouldn’t swear. As I mentioned before this treatment was not only racist, but sexist as well, which is why it is more useful to frame discrimination as intersectional, rather than as discrete 'isms’.</p>
<p>Other examples include 'harmless jokes’, assumptions of values and opinions and, again, 'invisible’ cis-white-heteronormative, etc. organisational cultures. A quote I heard describing attitudes to disabled people, is a good example of casual discrimination on many levels: "the soft bigotry of low expectations".</p>
<p><strong>Why is casual racism harmful in the workplace?</strong></p>
<p>My view is that 'casual discrimination’ is more harmful than overt discrimination because it is often hard to quantify and often flies under the radar because it is subtle, invasive and cultural in an organisational sense. It often isolates the targets and mutes them because there is no permission to confront it as a serious issue. Targets of casual discrimination are often laughed-off as being over-sensitive, PC, or simply wrong.</p>
<p><strong>People often see casual racism as harmless or just joking – how can HR professionals communicate to leaders and employees that this isn’t the case?</strong></p>
<p>As in the case of sexual harassment, it is important for HR professionals to understand and communicate that the threshold for casual discrimination needs to be defined by the person being discriminated against, not the person discriminating. There is a need for courage in naming this phenomenon and my advice would be to drop the casual label, as it implies that it is less harmful or serious than overt discrimination. Ideally, HR professionals would be encouraging a culture that values the entire spectrum of diversity. They would also be modelling the ability to openly converse about issues relating to difference and similarity (or uniqueness and commonality), and facilitating employees to become more aware of privilege and judgement.</p>
<p>As a final point, I would encourage people to think about privilege and judgement as natural, human processes. Rather than trying to eliminate privilege and judgement, the challenge is to accept them as part of the way society and people are conditioned. It is important to be aware of privilege and judgement and be conscious and intentional about how you respond to other people.</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Thu, 28 Sep 2017 10:38:06 +1300http://www.philippatston.com/blog/casual-racism-er-no/The metaphor of an on-screen keyboardhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-metaphor-of-an-on-screen-keyboard/
<p>Although my vlog got a fair bit of engagement (57 views — not exactly viral), I actually miss writing. So I'm using my mouse with an on-screen keyboard to write this. It's a bit slower than typing with my right hand, but a little more accurate I think. So all in all, it probably averages out around the same.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550152-MenubarandUS.png" alt="on-screen keyboard" width="550" height="152" title=""/></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Today marks the beginning of the sixth week without the proper/usual use of my right hand. I've had a diagnosis of radial nerve dysfunction and a prognosis of 6-12 weeks for it to heal (although some bastard on Facebook said he had it for 5 years — thanks for sharing, it made my day).</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">It's a little surreal, having lost function without an incident. Just waking up with half as much dexterity as when I went to bed. </p>
<p>I sometimes run a workshop exercise where I get people to imagine waking up to an unexpected change — in hair colour, gender, wealth, sexual preference, race or function. Change/loss of function always gets the most negative responses yet, as I remind people, it’s the only change that can happen overnight, either feasibly or without conscious choice.</p>
<p>My situation is a testament to that.</p>
<p>So I have still been working hard not to catastrophise this change in function. It’s somewhat common, known as ‘Saturday night palsy’ (referring to drunkenly falling asleep on your arm) or ‘honeymoon palsy’ (when someone else falls asleep on your arm) — in my case, it’s ‘Friday night palsy’.</p>
<p>What has been brought home to me is that my needs are changing as I age. Life is harder than it was five or ten years ago, I’m less mobile, less agile and more prone to falling and dropping things. So I’m also redesigning my support, finding a way to have support twice rather than once a day.</p>
<p>It’s interesting to use this time to reflect on uncertainty, change, acceptance and surrender. It’s fascinating to notice once again, from a personal perspective, how attached we are to certainty and how we struggle to accept and surrender to change.</p>
<p>My first instinct was to fight against this change, much like we’ve seen with Metiria Turei’s resignation. I immediately went into thoughts of, “Nooo! She can’t give up without a fight!” But she had. She accepted and surrendered to the changes her candid revelations had made to her personal and political circumstances, then did what she needed to do to minimise the impact.</p>
<p>In this respect, my using the on-screen keyboard is a metaphor for accepting and surrendering to change. It’s strange and awkward but it’s minimising the impact of my change in function. And who knows? As I use and get used to it, maybe I’ll come to prefer it.</p>
<p>Just as Metiria may prefer her new life.</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Sat, 19 Aug 2017 12:42:11 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-metaphor-of-an-on-screen-keyboard/On Metiria, Jacinda and the state of NZ politicshttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/on-metiria-jacinda-and-the-state-of-nz-politics/
<p style="text-align: left;">As I still can't type properly I'm experimenting with vlogging. Apologies Deaf followers, I'll add subtitles asap.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550218-jm.png" width="550" height="218" alt="" title=""/><br/><a style="text-align: left;" href="http://www.newshub.co.nz/home/election/2017/07/you-can-t-condone-lawbreaking-jacinda-ardern-to-metiria-turei.html" target="_blank">Why is Jacinda dissing her Greens sis?</a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"> </p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><iframe src="http://www.philippatston.com//www.youtube.com/embed/tIXaAE5WjzQ" width="530" height="298" frameborder="0">&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/div&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt; &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/div&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt; &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br /&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt; &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;div style="text-align: center;" mce_style="text-align: center;"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt; &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;div style="text-align: center;" mce_style="text-align: center;"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;iframe src="//www.youtube.com/embed/tIXaAE5WjzQ" mce_src="//www.youtube.com/embed/tIXaAE5WjzQ" width="530" height="298" frameborder="0"&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/div&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt; &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br /&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;</iframe></p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Sun, 06 Aug 2017 12:30:00 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/on-metiria-jacinda-and-the-state-of-nz-politics/Limp wristhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/limp-wrist/
<p>I woke up on Saturday morning to find I couldn't lift my hand up with my when my palm was facing downwards. No pain, no numbness, just intermittent pins and needles or tingling and no power in the upper side of my wrist.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550309-Literal-Limp-Wrist-1024x576.jpg" alt="Limp wrist" width="550" height="309" title=""/></p>
<p>I can move my fingers and grip, though not as powerfully as usual. If I put my palm facing upwards I can lift my hand up. My coordination is not as good as normal, which isn't saying much.</p>
<p>I can't use my keyboard (I'm typing this with my left hand, using my mouse and onscreen keypad) or my iPhone, except with my nose.</p>
<p>And I can't drive. Pure irony. I said to many people last week, "I've finally mastered that bloody car."</p>
<p>But I'm being very intentional about not catastrophising this change in function. Whether it's temporary or permanent, I will adapt and be creative about living with an even more unique function — and having a limp wrist is so gay. I'm not denying it's annoying and frustrating but life in all its diversity will go on...and on and on and on (that's another post).</p>
<p>So, I'm seeing my GP &amp; a physio tomorrow. I wonder if my Dr Google self-diagnosis of <a href="https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/000790.htm" target="_blank">radial nerve dysfunction</a> is correct!</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Mon, 17 Jul 2017 15:15:40 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/limp-wrist/An interesting timehttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/an-interesting-time/
<p>I recently read three very different takes on the world as it is now and how it compares to the past. One was <a href="http://dnzl.nz/2u1R0Ss" target="_blank">this article</a> in the Guardian, "The age of anger", another Margaret Wheatley's <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01N7VMO2Z/ref=oh_aui_d_detailpage_o01_?ie=UTF8&amp;psc=1" target="_blank">new book</a>, "Who Do We Choose To Be?: Facing Reality, Claiming Leadership, Restoring Sanity" and the third, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/f.html?C=O5ID2HJ90BI3&amp;K=AD8M7DFW6C1QI&amp;R=K0CH965OUV2&amp;T=C&amp;U=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2Fdp%2FB01MDMV1GT%2Fref%3Dpe_385040_118058080_TE_M1DP&amp;A=K4BNU8Q0KONWCFNHPMVEZBKEXA8A&amp;H=AAJ43UADNW18YHWEP2QD8RLQZQAA&amp;ref_=pe_385040_118058080_TE_M1DP" target="_blank">a book</a> by Magenta Pixie, "Masters of the Matrix: Becoming the Architect of Your Reality and Activating the Original Human Template".</p>&#13;
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550313-world-time.png" alt="world map overlaid with clocks" width="550" height="313" title=""/></p>&#13;
<p>All used very different lenses — political, historical, leadership, spiritual and more — but all had a similar theme. The world, at this time, is in a state of flux.</p>&#13;
<p>At the worst, as Wheatley says, civilisation is decaying, as it has many times over (every ten generations, according to Sir John Glubb (p34). She sees the leadership challenge as needing to be "warriors for the human spirit" and "creators of islands of sanity". Not, she insists, to try to stop the decline. Decay is part of the natural process and, in leadership, we can no longer act at any higher level than locally, if that. Our influence may even only reach to our communities.</p>&#13;
<p>The Guardian article drew similar conclusions, likening political phenomena such as the GFC, Trump, Brexit and terrorism to the cold war, world wars, the Great Depression and neo-Nazi sentiments. Like Wheatley, journalist Pankaj Mishra sees a world in chaos.</p>&#13;
<p>Mishra ends with a call for "greater precision in matters of the soul", which links in with Pixie's book. She channels "The White, Winged, Collective Consciousness of Nine" (a bit woo-woo for some but interesting philosophically), who remind of the linear time illusion of the physical or third dimension in comparison with parallel timelines in higher dimensions.</p>&#13;
<p>If all have a common theme it is this — now is a time of decline, endings and a need to be realistic about the cyclical nature of civilisations. Wheatley advocates servitude over hope, Misra soul over rationality, and Pixie self-mastery of destiny.</p>&#13;
<p>But one thing is clear.</p>&#13;
<p>Now is a difficult, significant and very interesting time to be in the world and it will get worse. Our challenge is to be the best versions of ourselves, kind, courageous and, I think, to have faith that we can ride it our for some benefit.</p>&#13;
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>&#13;
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>&#13;
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" alt="" width="150"/></a></p>Mon, 10 Jul 2017 11:31:04 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/an-interesting-time/Have we got mental health wrong?http://www.philippatston.com/blog/have-we-got-mental-health-wrong/
<p>Last week I started taking anti-anxiety medication. After six years, starting with the neighbours in 2011-2012 and culminating in the car saga earlier this year, I decided I needed help. I was sick of feeling like shit most of time.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/mentalhealth.png" width="550" height="367" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>So I went to my GP last week and asked for help. He assessed me on the <a href="https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety-and-depression-checklist-k10" target="_blank">Kessler (K10) scale for depression and anxiety</a> — I scored 30 out of 50, qualifying me for treatment with <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selective_serotonin_reuptake_inhibitor" target="_blank">SRRIs (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors)</a> and psychological therapy.</p>
<p>He then explained to me, drawing pictures, what causes anxiety in the brain. This was a huge revelation to me.</p>
<p>Essentially, anxiety and depression happen when hormones and chemicals in the brain become depleted and affect the transmission of electrons across synapses. What I realised is that is no less physical as the impact of brain damage that impacts my physical function.</p>
<p>I take medication — muscle relaxants and anti-inflammatories — to mitigate the physical effects of my brain dysfunction on my physical function. I feel no shame or stigma.</p>
<p>Yet I feel like taking medication for anxiety or depression, despite or because of the worthy recoveries of the likes of John Kirwan and Mike King, still elicits judgement.</p>
<p>My unique physical function (Cerebral Palsy) was created by an event — my traumatic, 48-hour birth. My unique emotional function (anxiety) was created by several events — bullying neighbours for two years followed by the purchase of a $100k+ car that I couldn't drive.</p>
<p>I can't see any difference. Like disability activists have fought to see disability as a social issue, so I see a need to reframe mental illness from an individual to a social paradigm.</p>
<p>An event causing physical difference in my brain created physical uniqueness. Events causing physical difference in my brain created emotional uniqueness.</p>
<p>I now take medication to allieviate both effects. What's the difference?</p>
<h4 style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://diversitynz.us12.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=a7a79e182093445b189dc6daf&amp;id=be5479f9ee" target="_blank">Subscribe to this and other blogs at DiversityNZ.com</a></h4>
<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Fri, 30 Jun 2017 16:48:27 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/have-we-got-mental-health-wrong/Living on the edgehttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/living-on-the-edge/
<p>On Sunday my PA was sick and didn't arrive at 9.30 as planned. I called and texted and finally received a reply at 10.45am. Meanwhile I texted a couple of my other PAs — one was in West Auckland and couldn't make it for an hour, another didn't reply and another was on a yoga retreat.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/Living-on-the-edge.png" alt="A silouetted person stands looking over a cliff" width="550" height="288" title=""/></p>
<p>I eventually texted a friend who lives nearby. I began writing this while I waited for her, to help me put my shoes and socks on, take my pills and then go out to brunch.</p>
<p>It's a bit of a myth that Individualised Funding (or self-directed funding as it's also known, where you manage your own disability support) is a panacea when it comes to autonomy and independence. While it is far superior to relying on home care agencies, unfortunately it's not failsafe.</p>
<p>Even with four people making up what I term my "Morning Crew", I still struggle to prevent situations like Sunday from occurring. All are part-time or contractors, so all have other jobs and clients to attend to. The crack in the system is that I can only offer 22 or so hours a week over seven days to four people, meaning that I cannot offer sustainable employment.</p>
<p>I've often considered finding someone else nearby with similar needs to share PAs to try and create a more viable proposition. There are two snags:</p>
<ol><li>Most likely we will need support at similar times; and</li>
<li>A match of personality types is essential for the role so, someone with whom I get on may not gel with some one else.</li>
</ol><p>So, it's an imperfect situation which, at times, fails. Not often, I'm glad to say, but that takes a lot of communication and co-ordination on my part.</p>
<p>Luckily, or maybe I should take more credit than luck, I have great people who truly understand how crucial their role is in my life. Even so, with all the goodwill in the world from the Crew, the reality is I sometimes still feel like I'm living on the edge.</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Sun, 18 Jun 2017 11:23:21 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/living-on-the-edge/Diversity is hard workhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/diversity-is-hard-work/
<p>When I began working for myself in 1998 I read a book — I can't remember which — that made an important distinction between <strong>hard</strong> work and <strong>difficult </strong>work. I've never forgotten it.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/hard-work.png" width="550" height="383" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>Hard work is about being persistent, disciplined, committed and, sometimes, working long hours (especially in the case of starting a business). Difficult work is complicated, confusing or highly technical — it takes a certain level of intellectual or specialist "grunt" to achieve the desired outcome.</p>
<p>I see working with diversity in a similar way. It's hard, but it isn't difficult. It requires persistence, discipline, commitment and, most importantly, awareness, empathy, generosity and courage. </p>
<p>It's hard doing all that, but it's not difficult. Yet hard work is tiring and often stressful, so you need to take time to rest and recover, even to unload. In a supervision session yesterday I realised that, even though diversity is what I specialise in, I get over it sometimes. I find people annoying and complex. I disagree with people with different beliefs and values, as much as I treasure the variety they bring.</p>
<p>So this is something I intend to bring into my work more from now on — in my speaking, workshops and one-on-one consulting. It's easy to become pious about this kind of work — to come across as having all the answers and getting it right all the time.</p>
<p>The truth is I struggle with diversity as much as the next person and I need time and people to whom I can rant and rave, grapple and inquire, and with whom I can strategise about how to put things right.</p>
<p>All that's hard work, but it's not difficult — unless you try to ignore or deny that it is hard work. And that's ok. Ask for help. Keep going. </p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Fri, 16 Jun 2017 15:17:02 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/diversity-is-hard-work/Turning inclusion inside outhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/turning-inclusion-inside-out/
<p>Inclusion. Such a buzzword of our time. But, <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/from-diversity-to-inclusion/">as I've written before</a>, inclusion is but a whisper away from assimilation and colonisation. Currently, inclusion asks, "How can we include <em>others</em> in <em>the mainstream</em>? But, what if we asked, "How can we include <em>the mainstream</em> in <em>others?"</em> instead?</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550387-inside-out.jpg" width="550" height="387" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>One of my clients, <a href="http://www.beaccessible.org.nz/" target="_blank">Be. Accessible</a>, is achieving this inside-out version of inclusion admirably by referring to <em>disabled people </em>as <em>access citizens </em>and pointing out that, at some time in our lives (whether due to ageing, temporary or permanent injury or illness), everyone will be an access citizen. This disrupts the conversation about one in four people having 'special' needs (them) and the rest (us). It reframes the conversation — we're all in the same boat in regards to needing spaces and places to be accessible. This framing invites the mainstream into the <em>access community.</em></p>
<p>Similarly, the recent adoption of the term <em>cisgender</em>, meaning having a gender identy that is the same as your sex (biological gender), disrupts the conversation that asks, "How do we include transgender or gender-fluid communities into a dual-gender mainstream?" Naming the 'normal'/'usual' gender identity (male or female) as <em>cis </em>welcomes the mainstream into a spectrum of gender identity that includes all.</p>
<p>For a long tive I've felt conflicted about using terms like <em>gay </em>or <em>queer</em> to describe my sexual orientation, because it polarises my preference and makes me <em>other </em>to the heteronormative discourse that it's 'normal'/'usual' to be straight. I would favour terms like <em>same-gender-attracted, opposite-gender-attracted, fluidly-attracted, non-attracted,</em> etc. because, again, the conversation is disrupted to consider a spectrum of attraction.</p>
<p>Were Aotearoa to effectively embrace the value of a bicultural society that honoured the indigeneity of Mana Whenua and Tangata Whenua, terms like <em>NZ European</em> and<em> Other European</em> might disappear from demographic surveys. <em>Māori </em>or <em>Pākehā</em> (or at least <em>non-Māori</em>) may become the default, with sub-categories such as <em>Mana Whenua, hapu, iwi </em>etc sitting under <em>Māori</em>. Other ethnicities would then sit under <em>Pākehā</em>.</p>
<p>Skeptics may argue that this is all an exercise in semantics. However, given that language is so determinant in shaping culture, reframing the default categories we use to define ourselves may well shift unconscious biases and create a more genuine interpretation and expression of inclusion and diversity.</p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Wed, 14 Jun 2017 18:46:39 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/turning-inclusion-inside-out/The other side of commonhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-other-side-of-common/
<p><a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/what-makes-people-fear-difference/">In my last post</a> I provocatively suggested using the word 'common' instead of 'similar', saying that, "Using 'common' removes the positive leaning of 'similar' and suggests a more ordinary, even <em>boring</em> connotation" (my emphasis).</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550275-common.png" width="550" height="275" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>My frolleague* in leadership, Lesley, reminded me that author Margaret Wheatley often writes about the importance of common interests in leadership and social change. <a href="http://www.azquotes.com/author/17954-Margaret_J_Wheatley" target="_blank">A couple of quotes</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>"Despite current ads and slogans, the world doesn't change one person at a time. It changes when networks of relationships form among people who share a common cause and vision of what's possible. This is good news for those of us intent on creating a positive future."</p>
<p>"When a group of people discover that they share a common concern, that's when the process of change begins."</p>
</blockquote>
<p>It's true. Acknowledging our common causes, visions and concerns is crucial in fostering crucial leadership relationships that create change.</p>
<p>It's when we ignore or discount our differences, or uniqueness, and <strong>only </strong>value the commonality, that we miss the opportunity for diversity.</p>
<p>The greatest challenge for humanity is to embrace the paradox of commonality and uniqueness, to see them as two sides of the same coin, or more accurately, at different points in a three-dimensional space of being.</p>
<p>Only then can we appreciate all the nuanced richness of input and experience that we all bring to the world.</p>
<p>-------------------------------</p>
<p>*friend and colleague</p>
<p>-------------------------------</p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Tue, 06 Jun 2017 16:27:03 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-other-side-of-common/What makes people fear differencehttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/what-makes-people-fear-difference/
<p>I often write and talk about my simple definition of diversity: <strong>the synergy of our uniqueness and commonality</strong>.</p>&#13;
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550365-fear.png" alt="" width="550" height="365" title=""/></p>&#13;
<p>In other words, the combined effect or interaction based on our differences and similarities. And we're all both similar to and different from each other, all <a title="World population live" href="http://www.worldometers.info/world-population/" target="_blank">7.508 billion</a> of us.</p>&#13;
<p>In general, people seem to feel comfortable with similarities: language, interests, values, beliefs, favourite music. But when it comes to differences, suddenly people get antsy, uncomfortable, fearful, angry. Why?</p>&#13;
<p>A lot gets talked and writen about <a title="World population live" href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_bias" target="_blank">unconscious bias</a>, <a title="World population live" href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confirmation_bias" target="_blank">confirmation bias</a>, ignorance, etc. But I actually think it's simpler than that.</p>&#13;
<p>I think people feel uncomfortable with difference for two reasons:</p>&#13;
<ol><li>They're uncomfortable in their own skin (or not aware of and at ease with their own values, beliefs etc).</li>&#13;
<li>They're not curious.</li>&#13;
</ol><p>The reason I use 'unique' and 'common', rather than 'different' and 'similar', is because alternative words invoke alternative emotions. Have a look at this list of words beginning with 'diff':</p>&#13;
<ul><li>difference.</li>&#13;
<li>difficulty.</li>&#13;
<li>diffidence.</li>&#13;
<li>diffusible.</li>&#13;
<li>diffracted.</li>&#13;
<li>diffusions.</li>&#13;
<li>diffidency.</li>&#13;
<li>difflation.</li>&#13;
</ul><p>Notice how many have negative meanings. Now look at words starting with 'sim':</p>&#13;
<ul><li>simulcast.</li>&#13;
<li>simulated.</li>&#13;
<li>simulator.</li>&#13;
<li>simpleton.</li>&#13;
<li>simpatico.</li>&#13;
<li>simulacre.</li>&#13;
<li>simulacra.</li>&#13;
<li>simulates.</li>&#13;
</ul><p>Interestingly, they don't follow the same theme.</p>&#13;
<p>'Common' is defined as "collective, communal, community, public, popular, general; shared, joint, combined."</p>&#13;
<p>'Unique' is defined as "being the only one of its kind; unlike anything else." I've also seen it defined as "different in a way worthy of note."</p>&#13;
<p>Changing our language about diversity, I think, can subtly change our (un/sub)conscious response to it. Using 'unique' neutralises our negative reaction against difference and encourages us to be curious. Using 'common' removes the positive leaning of 'similar' and suggests a more ordinary, even boring connotation.</p>&#13;
<p>Try it. Reframe different as interesting and similar as meh (as well as becoming more comfortable in your skin) and see what happens.</p>&#13;
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>&#13;
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" alt="" width="150"/></a></p>Thu, 01 Jun 2017 16:36:16 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/what-makes-people-fear-difference/The courage (and opportunity) to not knowhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-courage-and-opportunity-to-not-know/
<p>When it comes to the future, we're pretty conditioned to expect certainty. Whether it's what we're going to say next, what's happening tomorrow, what the outcome of a project is going to be, or what life will be like in five years time, we want to know beforehand. We crave certainty.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550350-not-knowing.jpeg" width="550" height="350" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>Expectations are the outcome of this need to know what's going to happen before it does — and anxiety about things not going to plan.</p>
<p>I remember when I first started doing comedy in the late 1990s, I would script my routines down to the last word. But I was terrified I'd forget my lines. This anxiety <strong>made</strong> me forget my lines! I learnt, in the first couple of years of doing comedy, that I could hold subjects or themes in my mind, but not what I was going to actually say, word for word. Once I figured that out, doing comedy became infinitely easier and enjoyable. Also, if I may say so myself, I got a lot better at it.</p>
<p>On a similar note, I read a few years ago that, if you need to have a difficult or important conversation with someone, it's far better to be really clear about the outcome you want than to rehearse what you're going to say. The theory is that, if you're focussed on the intent and outcome, your brain will make sure you say the right things. Not having a script allows you to fully listen and respond to the other person/people, rather than waiting for "your turn" to say what you planned.</p>
<p>It's the same with work. I can't count the number of times I've said yes to a client's request to do something, only to go away and think, "How the hell am I going to do that?!" Yet, once I have become clear about the intended outcome, what I know and what I need to research, who I need to work with, etc., somehow things come together. I resist planning because I know the plan will change and, nine times out of ten, something better will emerge out of the process of actually doing it than I could have imagined in a planning process.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/trapped-by-the-prospect-of-my-new-found-freedom/">The recent situation with my new car</a> came out of my expectation that driving it would be easy. When it wasn't it threw me into huge anxiety and disappointment. Had I just sat with not knowing what it was going to be like, I may have saved myself a certain amount of angst that was based on the dissonance between my expectations and reality.</p>
<p>It takes courage to admit that we do not and cannot know what's going to happen — it's much easier to lull ourselves into a sense of security that we can create future certainty. It calls on our ability to trust ourselves and each other.</p>
<p>The cost of creating future security, however, is opportunity. When we strive to maintain certainty, we miss the possibility that exists in trusting our ability to learn, create and achieve outcomes we may never have been able to plan for or be certain of.</p>
<p>Working with diversity requires this commitment to future uncertainty. Opening ourselves to not knowing what will happen — and being aware of the latent opportunity diversity offers — is crucial to embracing and encouraging it authentically.</p>
<p>Fear of uncertainty limits the opportunity of diversity. Loving uncertainty unleashes diversity's opportunity. It's a balance.</p>
<p>If there's anything my business is about, <a href="http://diversitynz.com/contact" target="_blank">it's getting the balance right. </a></p>
<p> </p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Mon, 29 May 2017 15:25:23 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-courage-and-opportunity-to-not-know/Grappling with myselfhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/grappling-with-myself/
<p>Nearly two months after getting my new car, I'm still deeply uncomfortable about driving it. Partly this is because of the things that have gone wrong since I've had it — being unable to get out of it and, as recently as last Monday, not being able to get in.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/grappling.png" width="550" height="389" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>However, I also feel nervous driving it. It's very different than my Mazda, which I've had for around 10 years. From memory I felt much more confident driving it when I first got it, but maybe I've just forgotten. </p>
<p>I'm also driving the new car from my wheelchair, which is very different. The hand controls are very different and the way the Yeti handles is very different.</p>
<p>Not to mention I am generally a lot more anxious these days.</p>
<p>So I have two voices in my head with which I am grappling. One says, "Go easy on yourself. Give yourself time to get used to it. Drive short distances and you'll feel more and more comfortable over time. There's no rush. You still have the Mazda for longer trips."</p>
<p>The other voice isn't as gentle. It says, "For god's sake, toughen up! The more you drive it the quicker you'll get used to it."</p>
<p>If you're familiar with <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_analysis" target="_blank">Transactional Analysis</a> (TA), you'll recognise the voices as the ego states of nurturing and critical Parent.</p>
<p>According to Eric Berne, who developed the concept and paradigm of TA in the late 1950s, learning to strengthen the Adult state, which is directed towards an objective appraisal of reality, is a goal of TA.</p>
<p>So, what would my Adult, objective appraisal of this situation be?</p>
<ul><li>It's a new car and a new way of driving that I'm not used to. I haven't had to get used to a new car for nearly ten years and, <a href="https://www.quora.com/They-say-its-harder-to-change-as-you-get-older-How-would-a-determined-person-go-about-it" target="_blank">according to this Quora article</a>, adapting to change may be a struggle for six months or more.</li>
<li>I've had bad experiences with the car, which have been a little traumatic (enter the adaptive Child).</li>
<li>I'm not a child, I'm an adult, so I can deal with this, but my adaptive Child state needs the attention and reassurance of the nurturing Parent.</li>
<li>I've had new cars before and I've gotten used to them — I'll get used to this one too.</li>
<li>It's only been two months, in fact not even that — if I take into account that just last Monday I couldn't get into it and needed the handcontrols repositioned, it's actually only been six days!</li>
<li>I was really looking to the freedom of the new car and never considered any difficulties. I'm disappointed (the adaptive Child strikes again).</li>
<li>I'm giving myself a hard time.</li>
<li>I have slight buyer's remorse.</li>
<li>Apart from the above, as a friend has so wisely just said to me, if there are aspects of the new car that simply won't work, I need to identify them soon so I can consider returning it within a reasonable timeframe.</li>
<li>It's ok to be kind to myself.</li>
</ul><p>Uncertainty and change such as this is uncomfortable, particularly when the stakes are high — there's safety, money, being able to function in my work and other considerations. I'm not sure what to do right now except to keep grappling with the trust that things will work out ok.</p>
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Sun, 21 May 2017 13:36:21 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/grappling-with-myself/Making difficult decisions easierhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/making-difficult-decisions-easier/
<p>Sometimes making big decisions, especially life changing ones, can be really difficult. Whether or not to quit a university course or a job, end a relationship, make an expensive purchase — how do you decide?</p>&#13;
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/decision.png" alt="guy with angel and devil sitting on each shoulder whispering/shouting in each ea" width="550" height="367" title=""/></p>&#13;
<p>Writing a list of pros and cons is the standard advice, but I don't find that useful. Often there are as many pros as cons and discovering that just makes it harder to decide.</p>&#13;
<p>When I mentor or coach clients trying to make a significant decision, I suggest the following process, which I've found useful for me:</p>&#13;
<h4>Make both decisions and see how each makes you feel.</h4>&#13;
<p>So if, for example, you're thinking about quitting your job, decide to quit for 24 hours. Go about your daily life having decided to quit and notice how you feel. Do you feel relieved, free, liberated? Or worried about money, being able to find another job, missing colleagues?</p>&#13;
<p>Then, after 24 hours, change your mind. Decide not to quit. How do you feel? Bored, stifled, frustrated? Or secure, resilient, committed?</p>&#13;
<p>I don't write things down but you may want to.</p>&#13;
<p>What I find is that, 48 hours later, I usually have a general idea of which decision <strong>feels</strong> better, rather than trying to use logic to decide.</p>&#13;
<p>Another helpful thing to do if you're still not sure is to make a decision that requires external things to happen — I call it letting fate decide. I did this when I purchased my new car. I had to apply for finance, so I made that the determinant. If I got finance, I'd see that as a sign that it was the right decision. If not, the car was not for me.</p>&#13;
<p>When I got finance, just to make sure fate was on my side, I also called my accountant to see if he thought it was a viable investment. He did. Two ticks from fate.</p>&#13;
<p>Even though I've had <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/trapped-by-the-prospect-of-my-new-found-freedom/">so many problems</a> with the car, I still have a sense of it being <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-picture-is-always-bigger/">the right thing to have done</a>. Trusting that you've made the right decision, even though events may suggest otherwise, is the last and very necessary part of the process.</p>&#13;
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<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>&#13;
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" alt="" width="150"/></a></p>Wed, 17 May 2017 12:10:26 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/making-difficult-decisions-easier/What we're not saying about pornhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/what-we-re-not-saying-about-porn/
<p>There's a lot of moral hysteria about pornography — sorry to state the obvious. The panic targets both the industry and its main audience, young men.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"> <img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/pornography.png" alt="guy watching porn on laptop" width="550" height="377" title=""/></p>
<p>Summed up, the industry exploits women and its products create bad sexual attitudes in men towards women. I'm referring to straight porn — I think things are different with gay porn but that's not the point of this post.</p>
<p>I'm not going to take a stand on any moral ground. I think the concerns are both legitimate and unfounded to different extents in different situations.</p>
<p>What I want to suggest is that there's something we're not saying about porn that is important and that, if it was said, it might significantly change, in particular, the impact of porn on young men.</p>
<h4>Porn is to sex as Hollywood is to life.</h4>
<p>Do we send young men to Superman movies and let them think, if they put on a blue leotard and red cape, they can fly? No.</p>
<p>Do we say it's fine to drive at 200 km/h because the latest action movie features a high-speed car chase? No (though of course some people break the speed limit).</p>
<p>Is murder ok because a huge number of movies are murder mysteries? No.</p>
<p>Should we expect to time travel because we've watched <em><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Looper_(film)" target="_blank">Looper</a></em>? Of course not.</p>
<p><strong>Because we know Hollywood movies aren't real. They're stories about life. They're fantastical and exaggerated versions of life.</strong></p>
<p>Porn movies are the same. They're not real. They're stories about sex. They're fantastical and exaggerated versions of sex.</p>
<p>This is what we need to be telling young men, in particular, but all young people: "<strong>Pornography is not real. It's not a model for real sex. Real sex is different to porn sex, just as real life is different to Hollywood life."</strong> </p>
<p>And then have a conversation about real sex, in the same way we talk about real life. I know it's a bit more awkward but, come on, let's toughen up. And, if you can't say it yourself, ask someone who can. Sex education needs to be part of this new conversation, too.</p>
<p>As for Hollywood or the porn industry, I'm no expert, but I'm aware enough to know that Hollywood doesn't treat all its actors well. And don't tell me Hollywood child actors make free choices to enter the industry (I'm not condoning child porn by proxy, though I find it interesting that we easily condone child Hollywood stars in the wake of kids like <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Coleman" target="_blank">Gary Coleman</a> and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Macaulay_Culkin" target="_blank">Macauley Culkin</a>). I think the level of willingness or choice of porn actors to engage with the industry — and its treatment of them — is as varying as Hollywood.</p>
<p>Demonising porn isn't working. <a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/all-about-sex/201611/dueling-statistics-how-much-the-internet-is-porn" target="_blank">It's 30% of the internet's content</a> (and "90 percent of boys and 60 percent of girls are exposed to Internet porn by age 18").</p>
<p>We can't stop porn. Like sex work, it's been around forever, despite our individual and collective biases. But treating sexual entertainment as real sex is a problem.</p>
<p>What we can do, starting tomorrow, is have honest conversations about porn. It doesn't represent real life. Like Hollywood, it's entertainment, and being entertained is nothing to be ashamed of.</p>
<p>But just as we don't use Hollywood as a guide to real life (although we may have crossed that line with Trump), we can't use porn as a guide to real sex.</p>
<h4 style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://diversitynz.us12.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=a7a79e182093445b189dc6daf&amp;id=be5479f9ee" target="_blank">Subscribe to this and other blogs at DiversityNZ.com</a></h4>
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<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Wed, 10 May 2017 16:38:46 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/what-we-re-not-saying-about-porn/The picture is always biggerhttp://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-picture-is-always-bigger/
<p>My $100k+ car is still not sorted. I still have to clumsily put a key in the ignition. The dealers are working on it — it's gobbly gook to me, except the fact that they're having to liaise Germany to solve it.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="center" src="http://www.philippatston.com/assets/_resampled/resizedimage550412-perspective.png" width="550" height="412" alt="" title=""/></p>
<p>I've been wrestling with the urge to get annoyed with them and become a pain in their backside but, realistically, they seem to be doing all they can in the circumstances.</p>
<p>The whole saga with the car reminds me that, as with all change, there are some aspects we can control and others we can't. There is uncertainty to deal with. It takes time. We can only influence certain things and for those we can't, we need <a href="http://www.philippatston.com/blog/how-cp-has-made-me-tolerant/">patience or, at least, tolerance</a>.</p>
<p>Change is dynamic and complex. We need to "zoom out" and see the bigger picture, the connections and impacts we can't see close up. Once we see both perspectives, we can respond to what we can influence and surrender to what we cannot.</p>
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<p><em>You are welcome to share this post freely and without permission. Acknowledgement and a link back to this site would be appreciated. And please leave a comment if you wish – I'd be interested to know where I've ended up.</em></p>
<p><a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank"><img src="http://i.creativecommons.org/l/by-sa/3.0/88x31.png" alt="Creative Commons License"/></a></p>
<p>This work is licensed under a <a rel="license" href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US" target="_blank">Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://diversitynz.com/" target="_blank"><img src="http://res.cloudinary.com/hrscywv4p/image/upload/c_limit,h_1440,w_720,f_auto,q_90/v1/343613/h3mmxthcb4lv28ibfysr.png" width="150"/></a></p>Tue, 09 May 2017 10:15:45 +1200http://www.philippatston.com/blog/the-picture-is-always-bigger/