Tales Of An Educated Debutante

on life, loss and the joy that rules the day.

The future is far away and scary, but today is lovely.

Two lines of boys in the month of June.
Two lines of boys, roughly the same age.
Two lines of boys, one group born to privilege and the other seeking a better life.
Two lines of boys, one group in Tornillo, Texas and one group in Arapahoe, North Carolina.
Two lines of boys, both groups hot and sweaty.
Two lines of boys, one group hopeful for letters and boxes filled with candy and water guns.
Two lines of boys, one group wondering where the fuck they are and if ..

He’s not terribly sporty.
He plays soccer somewhat reluctantly and church basketball, a bit begrudgingly.
Perhaps it’s the running.
He’s not much into sweating.
It took years to get him out of a collared shirt, khaki shorts and loafers.
His spirit is sweet and giving, not so much competitive or cut throat.
We dropped his nervous self off at mountain camp today.
A birthday gift from his grandparents and after watching the promo video a half dozen times, he ..

Keeping Score
Not me. Not his dad. Not his teachers. Only him. He keeps score and no matter our words or reassurance, he won't let those numbers go. Don't baby him, some say. You can't keep him in a bubble forever, others scoff. You'll have to let him fail sometime, you tell me. Well, I don't agree, not when the subject still calls me mommy, the sixth grader who leans in for a hug and asks to sleep in our bed when daddy is gone. That boy will be thrown to the wolves over my dead body, bu ..

It wasn’t how I thought the day would unfold. Truly.
I was sick with worry and in a fit of neediness, I asked my mama to come and spend the day.
She said yes.
She went with me to an IEP meeting that was awfully good.
Mothers know best, don’t they?
Mine does.
She went with me to my oldest son’s award ceremony.
He won an awful lot.
I never won much of anything. I was never the best at anything unless you count the second time I took Latin I, but I ..

My favorite part of today?
It wasn’t the awards.
It wasn’t the end of school excitement.
It wasn’t even the knowing that no more lunches would have to be packed over the next 11 weeks.
It was these two.
An older brother, a sixth grader this year, and a younger brother, a fourth grader.
The oldest asked what he should wear and I asked for what.
I’m going to Russell’s awards day, remember?
Of course I didn’t remember.
I am an exhausted sloth at this ..

Many schools are offering parties, trips, all variety of incentive programs for high EOG scores. Last year, a bus took a group of kids from Tarboro to King’s Dominion, kids that made 4’s and 5’s. A Charlotte school took pictures of the children who made 4's and 5's so that the images could be made into posters to hang around the school. It was shared with me that a teacher observing the photography session said: In 19 years, I've actually never worked anywhere where scores were announced pub ..

Would you believe me if I told you that these sons of mine have made my life complete?
There are two more, of course, the sister that comes between and the oldest brother.
The sun shone bright after days of endless clouds spilling rain.
Not quite June and it was summer hot, a wallow in a wave pool kind of day and so, we did.
The whole lot of us.
We swam and jumped and dunked and ebbed and flowed and submerged our weary selves in a day of simplicity.
The banter wa ..

A tradition in our small town.
Late May, the seniors try on their caps and gowns for the first time and then, they take a walk through their old stomping grounds
White Oak Elementary.
DF Walker Elementary.
Chowan Middle.
My own four children are dispersed between those three schools and they came home, eager to share who they had seen and the high fives that had been dispersed.
One hundred and forty three shining faces, young men and women, who have been raised ..

We expected tradition.
Stiff British upper lips.
Fascinators.
We did not expect to be taken to church.
But I’ll be damned if The Most Reverend Michael Curry, the first African-American Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church, didn’t take us right there.
His sermon quoted from St. Paul and Martin Luther King, Jr., and centered around the redemptive qualities of simple, selfless love. The love between Harry and Meghan, the love Jesus had for the world and the power ..

Oh, this woman illustrates grace and strength in the path of adversity, kindness in the path of righteousness, joy in the path of heartbreak and love as the path that guides her journey. I’m so thankful to follow behind her. Much love to you, Mama. Adrian & Adam ..

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Tales Of An Educated Debutante

Adrian H. Wood, PhD is a rural Eastern NC mother of four, one with extra special needs. Past preschool teacher, nanny, children's ski instructor,
early interventionist, college professor, early childhood researcher, wife and full time mama.