It's probably for the best if Freak doesn't write your Christmas cracker jokes

He can do the musical accompaniment, though.

Published: 4:00 pm, December 14, 2017

Freak has been causing absolute mayhem this year, with riotous festival sets and that Dork Live! tour with King Nun. Connar Ridd isn't great at Christmas cracker jokes, but everything else? Top-notch. It's the start of something great.

Hey Freak, how has your 2017 been then? What’ve been your highlights?
Hi Dork, yeah it’s been mad, our highlights have been doing our own co-headline tour and playing Reading & Leeds Festival where Jonn smashed his bass, and we blew the power twice, it was great.

What news stories have affected you this year?
There is an STD carrying ladybird roaming around Chelmsford, and that troubles us quite deeply.

Are you hard at work on new music at the mo?
Yeah, it’s pretty crazy, we’re spending every day writing and recording songs. I’m so excited to release what we are working on; it’s all feeling really good

What are your plans for 2018?
More music, more gigs, lots of fun.

What would you most like to do over the next twelve months?
Roller skate hand in hand with Dave Grohl, we’ll call it Grohler Skating.

It’s nearly Christmas now - how do you get into the festive spirit?
Classic bit of Muppets Christmas carol and a naughty hint of old Mickey Bubble.

If you were to make your own Christmas cracker, what would the joke be?
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the guy serving and says, ‘Hey man, hows it going, don’t suppose I could have a beer?’ to which the barman says, ‘Yeah sure mate, no problem, that’ll be £5 please’. So the guy pulls out a £5 note and says, ‘Thanks, here you go’ and hands over the £5 note and has his beer. The second man walks into the bar and says, ‘Oh hi, I was wondering if I could get a beer please mate?’ and the barman says, ‘Yes mate that’s no problem, that’ll be £5 please’. So the guy gets out his £5 and gives it to the barman and starts drinking his beer. However, the third guy walks into the same bar, goes up to the barman and says, ‘Hey there, was wondering if I could get a beer please?’ and the barman says, ‘Sure thing, that’ll be £5 please’, to which the third guy says, ‘No problem, here you go’ and gets the beer.

Whose album are you most looking forward to landing next year?
Rumour has it Arctic Monkeys are releasing an album in 2018, so we’ll be excited to hear that if it happens.

Taken from the December 2017 / January 2018 issue of Dork, out now. Order a copy here.