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Pictures: 'Twilight Breaking Dawn, Part 1' Premiere in Los Angeles

Last night in Los Angeles the world stood still while the stars of Twilight Breaking Dawn Part 1 took to the red carpet for the premiere ahead of Friday's release of the movie.

But let's cut to the chase and deal with the elephant in the room: Kristen Stewart's dress with the slit practically up to her vagina. While the slit up to the vagina doesn't bother, me the dress itself does. It's like Grandma called and she wants her curtains back. Am I right?

And while I am pasty white myself, something about a pasty white leg in a dress doesn't do anything for me. I would have taken a dip in Snooki's bucket of bronzer just for the evening. But then you have to worry about turning orange or pulling a Valentino in which case pasty is best.

It was cool to see Heather Locklear and her daughter Ava at the premiere along with Jeffrey Dean Morgan who brings out the restraining-order dirty in me.

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Breaking Dawn premieres on Friday. Are you going to see it? I have my tickets and I'm peeing all over the place I'm so excited.