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Wednesday, September 03, 2014

In ten years...

Engagement Photo

Our wedding was supposed to take place on the afternoon of September 4th, 2004, but God had other plans. Thanks to Hurricane Francis, we had to bump it up to the evening of September 3rd.. and I still have to stop and think about what the correct real date actually is for our wedding. Still. No lie, I was thinking I was going to write this for *tomorrow*. Hurricane Jeanne crashed our make-up reception 3 weeks later..but that's another entry for another day.

A lot has happened in our lives in 10 years. One decision you make changes the entire path of your life. And this is not "Sliding Doors" so there is no way to know what life would have been like "If..." But here are some of the high & low points that I could recall with my failing mommy brain.

In ten years..

We've spent approximately 140 days at Walt Disney World. Truth. I love it there and he humors me. We've visited family in Chicago and Ohio, honeymooned in North Carolina and shortly paused in the states in between. We were supposed to [finally] go to NYC for our 10th but without mom, childcare is a hurdle. Maybe someday I'll get to "Be a Part of it".

In ten years..

We took over my teenage home, moved when we bought our own house, changed jobs, lost jobs, liked & hated new jobs, and finally settled into positions we love; John a commercial electrician at a company in Orlando that contracts with Disney and me, a SAHM with a little papercrafting on the side.

In ten years..

I lost one baby at 11 weeks, had a knocked-out emergency C-section with my first delivered child, fought & won for a VBAC on #2 despite great interventions and 2 inductions, and delivered #3 drug-free naturally. Of the 3 different ways for my babies to enter the world, I vote for #3. Only the Lord knows if more are to come though.

In ten years..

I laughed at homeschooling, pondered homeschooling, and SOLD OUT to homeschooling. Funny how a few years can change your perspective on things. When God calls you to it, He'll help you get through it.

In ten years..

I've buried a childhood dog, got bit in the face by a dog we were going to adopt [obviously didn't], fought cancer & lost with another, lost a 6 year old poodle way too soon, years later adopted another that only sleeps, and inherited my moms dog that seems to be outliving everyone. Clearly, I'm a dog person.

In ten years..

Found, Met & Connected, for the first time, with my half sister and step sister that will only be called "Sisters" going forward. I went from being an only child to a full whole other family in a matter of 3 years thanks to Facebook.

In ten years..

John's lost both of his maternal grandparents. I lost my grandmother 4 years ago and my mom this year. Life changed completely for all of us and nothing will ever be the same.

In ten years..

We've made friends, drifted from friends, had friends traveling on the path with you and those that are driving down another road but you still love them, old friends renewed, new friends that feel like old ones, cried & laughed with friends only God could pick for you, and miss friendships that peacefully parted ways in the ebb & flow of life.

In ten years..

We've had good times, bad times, devastating moments, and times of laughter & fun, been betrayed & loved, disappointed & elated. This is life as humans. There is no perfect man, woman, or marriage on this earth, any expectation of that is delusional. But the splendor is found in adversity, in fighting for your marriage & family, in giving and receiving grace, in realizing that He will bring "beauty from your ashes" and it's only in the Refiner's fire that your true shine will be revealed. There is merit in sticking with it when you *think* it would be easier to walk out, in realizing that God is not finished with me anymore than He is finished with any of us, in knowing that in the hard times we've walk, we are closer to God and each other.

God picked you for me, John Dearie, so I'm counting on Him as he reveals each & every step ahead. The verse on our wedding invitation has proven to be so true in our walk, " “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts". Isaiah 55:8-9NLT

It has not always been easy, as nothing of real value usually is, but I know at the end of my life, I will say "It was worth it".