A blog on my thoughts…

Into the Mind: Junilisca (Restraint)

Restraint, that one word can define an entire personality, for the better or the worst. One whom shows no restraint can be lead down the path of dishonor and destruction. Those with to much restraint can be lead down the path of seclusion, where their lives lack the excitement needed to be happy with life. Which one was Sora? Sora had the unfortunate situation of being both at least at one point in his life.

When he was younger, Sora lacked the restraint to do awkward and odd things. He was very curious about very many things and it lead to the other people of the neighborhood viewing him as a bad influence on their children, which lead to him not having many friends when he was younger. When I say he lacked restraint, he really did, he did things that a normal 8-9 year old should not do, the clearest example in my head right now is that he once literally stripped naked and streaked through his entire neighborhood. Luckily, he wasn’t caught, but it was exhilarating so he did that quite a few times. He lacked the restraint to stop himself from doing these things, and it showed poorly on his character.

Then came his highschool years, where he never did anything at all, he was -to- restrained, he would go to school stick away from other people, not take part in going out to movies, and other things and instead chose to stay at home after school and be on his computer night and day. This wasn’t because he was introverted as it is now, or because he didn’t want to, it was because he was terrified of the world, and he wanted to restrain himself from doing anything out of fear that it would at one point slam back into his face and hurt him as it had done so many times before. That’s around the time that I was born, while I didn’t know why I was born, or what I was born for at that moment, I was born, thrust into a world where I would not find a place for many years to come…

My name is Junlisica Alyssa Morgan, I am 23 years old, and unlike the others I was born outside of Le Coral. I was born during Sora’s exploratory phase, in a game known as Comic_RPG, and a place dear to Sora’s heart, a place he calls home, Smash_SL, both channels on IRC, and both Roleplay channels. I am a sniper, and a secret agent, usually made to handle secret operations, and assassinations that my leaders do not wish to handle publicly. In Comic, I was a mutant with extremely god like eye sight that could snipe things from eight miles away, in Smash however I was born into the Metal Gear World known as ‘Earth’. There, I was trained by Sora’s favorite character from the MGS series, Sniper Wolf. I was her protege that was hidden in the background, and someone who considered her a mother, and older sister, and she saw me as a daughter and younger sister.

Upon her death, I gained a split personality that was known as Sureshot. This personality was created in order to handle the lonliness and loss of my sister, as well as to allow me to pick up a sniper rifle once more. The memory of my joining the Smashers was a little hazy, it was during one of Sora’s Game Master runs to the world of Metal Gear (Considered one of his betters) and the group stumbled upon the White House where Sureshot had murdered the entire presidential cabinet and the president himself. Thats really all I remember, but the Smashers picked me and Sureshot up and eventually we joined the group and began working with the Smashers to save the universe from the one known as Banned.

Things went on like this for a few months to a couple of years, and Sureshot slowly and gradually faded into the background for a while during that time and I took control. It was during this time that I met and befriended Kristina, at the time we got around swimmingly and were the best of friends. However, Sora and I went through a transitional phase where I began to act different, and weird, and tried to all but force Kristina to be my lover. Due to this it lead to a breakdown between our friendship that peaked when Sureshot, at the same time, surfaced and began getting close to Orpheus. One day, Sureshot pushed Orpheus to far and caused him to just berserk, because Orpheus wanted both me and Sureshot. I wanted Kairan who was a person played by a close friend Kyo-Chi, and Sureshot wanted Orpheus. This wound up peaking the situation I had caused back then.

Sureshot called Kristina as Orpheus all but tortured her, forcing her to ride (Read: Fuck) a bedpost, which severely injured my body. Kristina broke down at that point and abandoned both of us, breaking me, and sending Orpheus into a wild rampage that would end with Orpheus’ memory being wiped. Broken, and hardly there mentally, I was taken care of for a bit by Naomi from the Metal Gear World. A few days after the incident Naomi was confronted by one of the leaders of the group, Falco, and forced her to send me away to a mental asylum where until I got better, I was to never be seen again.

So time passed, and I was reformed in a new RP that Sora had made, a game known as Le Coral, surely if you’ve been paying attention to the blog you’d know this game already. Here, I was split away from Sureshot, who became a separate entity entirely known as Cambrea Cohendor (Based off the band Coheed and Cambrea or something like that), and I became my own person. Here I met and fell in love with Marco who for a while we got along great, but eventually he felt he had to leave me, and though hurt, I wasn’t and still don’t hold it against him. I then turned to one of my best friends, Kairi Legonz, who introduced me to my second lover, William. Well you know how that turned out if you read Kairi’s post.

At this point, I began to question why I even existed. Was I there only to cause people pain and suffer myself? I missed Kristina, I missed my life, I missed Orpheus, I missed everything that I had built, but squandered away. I began to break down, and I began to blame myself, and I wanted to die. I wanted to vanish, I didn’t want to hurt anyone anymore, I didn’t want to cause HeroMystic, and Li anymore pain then I had… I had all but given up and was satisfied with just laying there and rotting away when my glimmer of sunshine began to peek through the darkness…

Devastated with what he had done to me, Li approached me almost in tears, I fuck you not, he was almost in tears. Literally falling to his knees and begging me to forgive him, that he’d do anything to make up for it. I was confused, why would he apologize to someone worthless like me? He should just let me die, and then he’d be free of me, like HeroMystic and Krissy would be. But…he didn’t, he begged and begged and wanted nothing more then to make me happy, and that’s when it hit me. I may have been in the wrong, but I wanted to try something, so I said I’d forgive him if he made Orpheus for me in Le Coral, and to make Orpheus my mate and loyal to me in any game I may play in.

And so he did, and I got with him in Le Coral, TDK, and Smash (Though that fell through) and for the longest time I hated myself for that action. I backed myself in a corner and was afraid that Orpheus was only loving me out of duty, not because he truly loved me. My awakening wasn’t as interesting as the others, but it happened on the day that Orpheus took a punishment for sleeping around on me. I turned him into a female, and showed him what it was like to be a woman, to give birth to a child. I know, its weird, but it was at that moment that I discovered that Orpheus truly loved me, he went through that and didn’t complain a single moment that it happened.

I awakened at that moment, I realized that I had known he loved me all this time, and part of me resisted the desire to curl up and die. Soon after awakening to my Aspect of Restraint, I was brought back into Smash, where I made amends to my best friend, and now sister, Kristina. My life had finally turned from that horrible, lifeless, bitch of a person, to the person I am now, a person of restraint, a person of dedication and duty, a person who loves and openly cares for all her friends. I will be by Sora’s side until the end of time for what he’s done for me, for caring for me, creating me, and keeping me after all I had done to everyone he cared about. He never once gave up on me, and for that I am eternally grateful. I am Junilisca Alyssa Morgan, and I am his Aspect of Restraint.