How to Gracefully Own Making a Public Mess of your Passion Project

Inspiration comes to us in the craziest ways. Anyone who has ever embarked on a creative project has experienced that midnight rush that has you sitting bolt upright, throwing on the light, and reaching for a pen, or a phone – anything to solidify that elusive, beautiful, powerful thing-thing that threatens to leave you at any second.

Over the next few days, or weeks, or months, you nurture this thing, working with it, loving it, collaborating with others on it.

But for as many ideas that come to fruition, there are just as many, if not more, that get lost along the way. Some that we started gung-ho and firing, just to have it stop feeling right halfway through. Somewhere along the way it lost its life force, its drive, and like an ex lover, you feel totally estranged from something that once slept beside you and knew you better than you knew yourself.

So what then? If it was a project you’d embarked on for your own pleasure it’s easy enough to pull the pin and call it a day, respectfully accept it didn’t work, move on.

But what if you’d openly marketed this idea, promised it to people, and had a large amount of people eagerly awaiting its arrival?

I first came across Bec Van Leeuwen on Instagram. I was drawn by the tagline: Soul Sister Circle is a “collective of conscious women united by creativity, love of life and a yearning to make a difference in the world.” I often find myself frustrated at the saturation of Westernised fluff that claims to be spiritual content that’s out there. As Bec and I discuss in the Podcast, spirituality is on trend right now. The fashion labels with the exorbitant price tags, the quotes without substance, the ultra-perfect, idealistic, misleading images. It sends out this very wishy washy message “buy x and get x amount of Instagram followers and prescribe to a few easily shareable quotes, and a spiritual life of bliss and success awaits you on the other side.” I feel no alignment with these things, and I’m always on high alert to find communities that resonate with this more realistic view of the messy journey that awaits those seeking a life of higher purpose, higher intent, and a higher state of becoming.

So when I come across a raw, authentic voice that speaks on these issues in a raw, messy, realistic way, I take notice.

At the beginning of the year I watched with anticipation as Bec Van Leeuwen pulled together something called Kinfolk festival, a festival that promised to empower the sisterhood to “reclaim their feminine power, and appropriately integrate this with the masculine in order to take positive action.” The countdown to the

event began, the tickets were released and sold, and by Bec’s own admission the festival was 90% percent done. But all the while, something was telling her something was not right. For some reason, in and amongst the to-do lists, emails, as well as raising two young children, Bec had fallen out of alignment with the vision and became disconnected to it. And while she could have gone ahead and let the show go on, on the tenth of February, she made the decision to announce her decision to pull the pin and cancel the festival. Her announcement read:

Bec Van Leeuwen

“My beautiful sisters, it takes all the courage I have to write this heartfelt message to you, as I know it will cause much disappointment and confusion.

For the past three months, I have committed every ounce of my energy to planning Kinfolk Festival and being a Mumma to two very young babes and as a result my health and relationships have suffered dearly.

I have also lost sight of what’s nearest and dearest, what I stand for has become faded and the work I am being called to do has unintentionally slipped through the cracks.

The intention behind Kinfolk Festival was crystal clear at the outset – create a transformative experience that will empower the sisterhood to reclaim their feminine power, and appropriately integrate this with the masculine in order to take positive action. It breaks my heart to say that what I have created, does not honour this intention.

Somewhere between the emails, to-do lists, night feeds and nappy changes I became disconnected and lost sight of the vision.

The result – a magnificent day yes, but not the day I am being guided to create.

I have decided not to continue with Kinfolk Festival. She is not fully aligned, she does not carry the essence of what she should and so, she cannot happen right now.

Some of you will respect me for standing in my truth and very publicly making a mess of things. Others will think I’m flakey, overcome by fear or that ticket sales had bombed. I’m not and they didn’t. I just cannot, in clear conscience promote and host an event that I know is a misaligned version of the event I am being called to create and the work I am here to do.”

Kinfolk Festival 2015. Image via soulsistercircle.com

I think the fact this announcement stood out to me so much is because in this fast paced, success driven, highlight-reel world we live in, it is rare to see someone openly and bravely admit and own when they have lost their way. So many people find themselves off track when walking the very fine line between working for a living and working for the soul, yet that’s easy to forget when all we see around us are the success stories. I got in contact with Bec in our first Salty Podcast to talk about why we need to learn to be comfortable disappointing people, the power of walking away from something that no longer serves us, why even that spiritual fluff has its place in the world, and how to recognize the difference between fear and misalignment in your passion projects.

Where are you being fluffy in your own life? What have you been scared to break free from?