President Obama has announced that his plans for military operations in Syria include degrading Assad’s military capabilities….. The first steps to Insure this objective is met have been set in to motion with Obama’s announcement of his candidacy for president of Syria and the opening of campaign offices throughout the country. Obama was quoted, off prompter, as saying; “Well uhhhhhh have you seen uhhhhhh what I’ve done to the Worlds greatest military?? Just imagine uhhhhh what I can do uhhhhhh to Syria’s military uhhhhhh in about uhhhhhhh 10 minutes after I’m uhhhhhhhh elected”!!!!!!

It has been reported that Barack Obama has, once again, changed his name. He will now be known as Bashar al-O-Bomb-A. His plan is to appeal to both the Assad loyalists and the al-Qaeda terrorists the United States are currently supporting in the civil war.