Malachy LOVES jokes, but lately, it seems like the joke is often on me. I remember watching the TV show as a kid, starring Bill Cosby, “Kids Say the Darndest Things.” Now, I’m living it! 😉

I posted some of these on Facebook, but needed to share them here…

Today, on the way to school…
On many an occasion, Malachy’s been asking people when they are going to have a baby, so I tried to put an end to it once and for all…Me: Malachy, not every couple who gets married has a baby.MAL: Oh, you mean not all Moms have babies?Me: (Pause) No, all Mommies have babies, but not all married couples have babies or might not want to have a baby.MAL: Oh, I get it. Not all woman have PMS, right?Me: (SILENCE)

Guess where he first learned about PMS? Over a year ago, from Katy Perry’s song, “HOT N COLD.” UNBELIEVABLE…

One evening, after dinner…MAL: So, Mommy, do you think you can make an exception today? Can I have some Hexagon Doze later, after dinner?ME: Some what??? (PAUSE) Ohhhh, I got it! You mean, Häagen-Dazs.MAL: Oh, yeah. That’s it!!!

While washing up before dinner…
So, I was going over the importance of washing your hands after using the bathroom. I was telling him that he could get himself or others sick if he doesn’t wash his hands.MAL: Oh, you’re right, Dad. We wouldn’t want to give the computer a virus, right?

After we received a Science Experiment Kit from Amazon… (http://amzn.to/fbUIaT)…
On the box, in small print, it reads, “Packed with Hair-Raising Experiments!”
After reading the box to himself…MAL: What is this? Are we going to grow hair or something?

After picking him up from school…
I pack up his folder and I see a note written from him, to me and Shien…MAL: Read it, Dad! 🙂