Month: August, 2015

by mollykl

A news story was just on talking about the growing childhood obesity problem in China, and mentioned that the “one child” policy is part of the problem. The reporter then went on to list all of the problems with only children.

I was sooooo glad that my only child son got to sit there and listen to everything that someone else thinks is wrong with him (none of which had anything to do with childhood obesity in China).

There are advantages and disadvantages to everything. We call that life. Son j had to sit and listen to a stranger list that he’s self centered, risk-adverse, lonely, lacking in empathy and non -competitive. (He is actually risk-adverse).

So as a counterbalance to all the negative he heard this morning, here I present the list of things that are good about being a single child:

I don’t lose my mind. Really, I can barely handle the one child I’ve got, you think I could handle two?

Empathy. I don’t know where the news story got their information about only children lacking empathy, or maybe they’ve never met the children I know. It’s probably not a coincidence that two of son j’s favorite literary heroes are only children and both are a bit odd, but both have helped to teach him about standing up for others and reserving judgement.

Less competition, and I don’t mean of the good kind. I have a younger sister who’s prettier, smarter and cooler than I am. I wouldn’t wish that kind of competition on anyone. Son j will not grow up feeling like he never quite measures up.

No “built in friends”. Son j doesn’t have a constant companion. When he makes friends he has to actually go out and put some effort in to the process.

Amazing imagination. After the video games are done he’s on his own with his books and art supplies and imagination. He writes stories and tells them to us and acts them out. His solitude has meant that he has a better daily word count than I do. (Something he’s quite proud of). I’m thinking of signing him up for nanowrimo.

I still, at 47, get comments about when I’m going to give son j a sibling. People, I’m 47, that ship has sailed. We never intended to have more children. We’re quite content with the one we’ve got. I wouldn’t trade my sister for anything (although if given the chance I might sell her), but I also don’t think Husband J had less of a childhood because he was an only child.

You know what makes a childhood? Being a child. Period. As adults how about we stop judging and let kids be kids?

by mollykl

Oy. You know what’s awesome about a bad day? The chance to make it better and realize that you survived said bad day. In my case this involved the series finale episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer – one of my go-to bad day cure-alls.

So in honor of Ms Summers and the feminist icon that she is (kicks ass, takes no shit, still not afraid to like girly-clothes and shoes) I present the 5 best quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer that will make your day better. Thank you Joss Whedon.

Giles: God, every day here is the same. Buffy: Bright, sunny, beautiful. However can we escape this torment?

Giles: I’m just going to stay and clean up a little. I’ll be back in the Middle Ages. Jenny: Did you ever leave?

[Willow brings Buffy, who is in hospital, her homework] Buffy: Homework. Willow: It’s my way of saying get well soon. Buffy: You know, chocolate says that even better. Willow: I did all your assignments. All you have to do is sign your name. Buffy: Chocolate means nothing to me.

Angelus: No weapons, no friends, no hope. Take all that away, and what’s left? Buffy: Me.

Buffy: So here’s the part where you make a choice. What if you could have that power, now? In every generation, one Slayer is born, because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. So I say we change the rule. I say my power, should be *our* power. Tomorrow, Willow will use the essence of this scythe to change our destiny. From now on, every girl in the world who might be a Slayer, will be a Slayer. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power. Can stand up, will stand up. Slayers, every one of us. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?

by mollykl

I realize I’ve been using most of them as a form of false modesty (let’s be realistic, I know I’m not stupid), but using them at all isn’t doing me any favors. I mean really, if I can’t stand up for myself, to myself, who can I stand up for?

Say goodbye:

5. Fat – What the hell does this word accomplish unless you’re making a salad dressing or a marinade?

4. Ugly – So I don’t ascribe to the accepted norm of beauty – that doesn’t make me ugly. What it does make me is appreciative of all forms of beauty.

3. Bitch – I will stop referring to myself as a bitch simply because I am calling you out on your shit.

2. Stupid – I love my friend K because whenever I say “Oh my God I’m so stupid” and she hears it she gets angry and says, “Don’t say that about my friend.” It’s a little thing but it reminds me that the crap I wouldn’t put up with being said about a friend I will gladly heap on myself. And, come on, we all know I’m fucking brilliant.

1.Sorry – I’m tired of apologizing all the time. I’m not sorry, I’m learning. I’m not sorry, I have something to say. I’m not sorry, I’m standing up for myself. I’m not sorry, I want service. I’m not sorry for my existence. I am sorry that it took me this long to figure that out. But I won’t say it out loud.

by mollykl

No, I don’t know everything, but yes, I do know some authors. Trust me, you’ll be better off having read these.

1. Madeleine L’Engle. She might sound familiar to you for A Wrinkle In Time (which, not coincidentally frequently finds itself on the list of most banned books). I’m a particular fan of An Acceptable Time (the culmination of the time series) and A House Like A Lotus (which was actually my first exposure to M.L. )

2. Jane Austen. Oh come on, you knew this had to be on the list. Just read Pride and Prejudice. You won’t be sorry. If you’re one of the guys I work with who think Jane’s either too far above you/beneath you? Just read, and do everything D’Arcy does. Trust me. And then thank me.

4. David Quammen. Want to know a little of the world you live in? Read David Quammen. The guy explains natural science in a way that any idiot can understand (and that’s this idiot’s opinion). You’ll have a better understanding of the natural world and a greater appreciation for the fact that you’re still alive in it.

5. J.G. Ballard. I’m a huge fan of The Drowned World, which is classified as sci-fi, but is really more about the psychological breakdown of the human mind. Also, it’s a chilling reminder that we never truly escape certain moments of our past – we just keep reliving them. (Oh, and please note that it’s about global warming – 50 years before there was such a notion as global warming)

6. Dorothy Sayers. What can’t that woman do? Her translation of The Divine Comedy is one of the most accessible ever done – it makes Dante’s concepts understandable (a feat, since most translators focus of the poetry rather and the context). Oh, and as mentioned to a couple of college guys I knew in 1987 who thought that Lord Peter was a bit of a ponce, “Hello, dumbasses? these girls are telling you, in detail, what they want. Shouldn’t you be taking notes or something?”

7. Mark Twain. The moment in Hucklberry Finn when Huck says, “alright then, I’ll go to hell” because he’s willing to sacrifice his soul just to be friends with Jim is probably the greatest moment in American literature we’ve ever seen. At some point, with luck, the country will realize it.

8. Robert Browning. Just read My Last Duchess. Read it several thousand times. I think I have. It’s beautiful and frightening and beautiful.

9. Antony Beevor . Stalingrad The Fateful Siege was a Valentine’s Day present from husband J. (Yeah, I know what you’re thinking…most girls get flowers or jewelry I get a book about 500,000 people dying in the freezing fucking cold). But it wa one of the best presents I ever got and one of the most amazing books I’ve ever read.

10. Arturo Perez Reverte. The Club Dumas is amazing. No. Do not watch the movie version. I don’t care of Johnny Depp was in it. It is awful and has NO RELATION to the movie. Oh, and pay close attention to Irene. Also, it helps if you’ve read Milton first, but is not essential. In hindsight, having seen Sherlock would help also. You’ll understand after you read. If you don’t, give me a call and we’ll have a drink and I’ll expound. At length.

If you feel like commenting add your two cents and tell me who I need to be reading.10 authors I think you

by mollykl

August in Sacramento used to be hell. Seriously. 105 degrees, the local news doing the obligatory “cooking eggs on the sidewalk” story, you’d actually feel sorry for the rattlesnakes kind of hell. This summer has been following suit but who knows what the next few weeks will bring. As in past years it might indeed be too hot to think. So once again I present to you an entire month of lists. Some will be repeats, because, really, my favorite literary theorists have not changed. Some will be new, some will be serious, most will be frivolous.