GlowQuote

Do you have your
own inspiring vision of living your healthiest, happiest, most creatively
fulfilling, productive and JOYful Life? ☺

At this time of year there’s a lot of talk
about making New Year’s resolutions and setting goals for the coming year.

Instead of setting the same old goals that
don’t really inspire us, i.e. “must lose
weight”, or “get out of debt”, or
“make more money” – it’s a lot more
FUN and more compelling to be driven and lead by an inspiring vision for Your Wonderful Life. ☺

7) What can I STOP DOING right NOW that will bring me closer to my vision?

8) What can I START DOING right NOW that will bring me closer to my vision?

Have FUN designing the life that You WANT. And then set your goals to create it. Be inspired to live your healthiest, happiest most JOYful Life –
because You CAN!
And then set your intention to Rock your Happiness, tune into the Good Stuff
and Get Your Glow On! ☺

We all go through periods of self-doubt
when we think that we’re not good enough. This often happens when we compare
ourselves to others and think that we don’t match up.

I experienced a crisis of confidence
recently. I was invited to a corporate function, as they wanted me to be the
speaker at their next event. The speaker that evening was a survivor of a
terrorist bomb blast who had lost both his legs, and survived to become a
long-distance runner.

As I listened to him I realised that I had always thought of myself as
extremely lucky – and one my luckiest things ever was that I had been at the same restaurant as this guy - the
night before! And I was looking after
other people’s children (one of whom had snuck out of boarding school – but
that’s another story! ☺) so I still feel weak and hugely
relieved every time I think about it!
But of course I didn’t want to tell that story. Especially after I heard what
he’d been through. It was beyond harrowing. It wouldn’t have felt right to turn
around and say how lucky I was to have been there the night before, after what happened to this guy!

“Who
wants to hear about how lucky you are? No-one cares how lucky you are. They
want to know how you’ve overcome tremendous challenges. How you’ve survived
bomb blasts or cancer or swimming in ice. Who do you think you are? What have
you ever done that’s so impressive? What’s so inspiring about You?”

I confessed to a group of close friends that I didn’t
think I was up to the task of being an inspirational writer and speaker.
Who would be interested in my story? I wasn’t a top CEO who’d built up a
billion-dollar business. I wasn’t an ice swimmer saving the planet. I hadn’t
survived some life-threatening situation. What did I know anyway? What inspiring
credentials did I have to write a book, or stand up and speak to a crowd?

Thankfully, there’s nothing like good friends to help you get over yourself. ☺

They reminded me that I inspire and encourage many people
every day!
My writing, talks and workshops always get fantastic feedback!
And then I remembered why I do the work I’m doing and that my credentials are my
gifts that I’m sharing every day – the gifts of insight, intuition, humour and tongue-in-cheek
wisdom that support and encourage people to enJOY their Life’s journey.

“We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child
of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing
enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the
glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people
permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence
automatically liberates others." ~ Marianne Williamson

I’ve made a folder on my computer
called “Nice Stuff” which contains wonderful messages and heartfelt Thank You’s
from clients and people who’ve heard me speak, or read my work – and if I find
myself having a mini meltdown I open this up and read the messages to remind
myself that I’m on the right track! ☺

And when we are on the right track the Universe does
kindly affirm it for us. ☺ Recently
I gave a workshop which was attended by a woman who works for the ice-swimming,
planet-saving Lewis Pugh – one of my personal heroes. She came to thank me after
the session and I admitted to her that her boss’s impressive credentials had me
doubting my own contribution. She looked around the room and pointed out that I
was succesfully achieving what I wanted to do. And she sent me a follow up email to thank me for "facilitating a wonderful session". ☺

Often the biggest challenge we have to overcome is the way we see ourselves!

We disempower ourselves when we compare ourselves to
others and think that we’re not good enough.

We erode our confidence with our own self-doubt that
stops us from expressing our unique gifts that we were born to share.

So what if there are a zillion people who do what you
do. No-one else can do it exactly like You!

We’re all travelling our own unique journey and we all
have our own unique story to share.

"There are scores
of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will
appreciate our compassion, our encouragement, who will need our unique talents.
Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share
what we had to give."~
Leo Buscaglia

When we appreciate and honour ourselves and all that we
are, we believe in ourselves and emPower ourselves to shine our Light and share
our gifts.

"Every
achiever that I have ever met says, My life turned around when I began to
believe in me." ~ Dr. Robert Schuller

Don’t allow your own self-doubt to stop you from doing what You came here to do.Believe in Wonderful You and Get Your Glow On! ☺

I’ve been smiling to myself reading all the
excited posts on Facebook and Twitter – British high street fashion chain Topshop
has opened in South Africa. A few years ago, this news would have put me in an
excited shopping frenzy. But the last few years have seen my circumstances
change dramatically. And that’s the reason I’m smiling. ☺I may never have imagined that my credit-crunched budget would have
been a blessing. But it truly has allowed me to understand what’s really
important and to get my priorities straight.

I was obsessed with fashion! The latest looks, labels and beauty products – I had to have them all! I had to be in the front row of every
catwalk show. Even my boyfriends had to love fashion – I wanted men who would
shop with me. No surprise then, that three of them turned out to be gay! ☺

When I started working as a junior reporter on a newspaper, I was told to cover
an incident of political unrest. That didn’t suit me at all. It was dangerous
and deeply unglamorous. I remember telling my editor that I didn’t do body-bags
– I was all about Louis Vuitton! ☺ While my journalist friends and colleagues
were reporting on the harsh, scary realities of Apartheid South Africa, I was
only interested in the shallow world of glitz and glamour.

Vogue, Harpers and Queen and Harpers Bazaar
were my bibles. And because most of the stuff I wanted wasn’t available in
South Africa, I’d spend ridiculous amount of money travelling to Hong Kong,
London and New York just to shop.
When MAC cosmetics first opened up on the Kings Road in London, I couldn’t wait
to fly over and stand for hours in a queue just to buy their Spice Lip liner –
I bought into all the hype!
I lived for labels. I pined for Prada! It was an on-going, expensive obsession
and I could never get enough.

And then a few years ago, my circumstances
changed and I had to learn to live on a tight budget – not a situation I’d ever
been familiar with. Shopping for luxuries was the last thing on my mind.

I had to learn to survive – on my own for
the first time in my life, and with limited funds. And during this time, I had
a complete shift in awareness. I no longer gave a hoot about ‘stuff’. I
completely lost interest in it.

I needed to make sense of Life, especially my own life, and slaving after the
latest fashion no longer held any appeal.
I needed true soul nurturing and comfort and I instinctively knew I wouldn’t
find it in shopping.
In fact I couldn’t stand to be in a shopping mall – I started to find the
noise, artificial lights and the rows and rows of stuff overwhelming.

So much for the marathon shopper. She went
into retirement. ☺ The last time I happened to be in
Europe was during the winter sales – and I got as far as the front entrance of
Zara, before turning around and getting out of there as quickly as I could.

Of course I still love beautiful things – fine fabrics, beautiful design, pretty
clothes and luxurious body products. I’m still a girl who loves luxury and style! ☺ But I no longer agitate and angst about having more stuff than I
could ever need. And I’m no longer manipulated by trends or glossy magazines
telling me what I “must have”. ☺

Now I find fulfillment in expressing my creativity,
sharing my work, laughter, good food and good times with friends, time spent
with family, being out in nature, sunshine and sitting quietly on my own
enjoying my sea view.

I’m relieved to be off the hamster wheel of an industry that’s designed to keep
one wanting more. Of course there are still gorgeous things that I want to buy
– but they’re not the main focus of my life.

New, shiny stuff is definitely a nice-to-have, but it can’t replace Love, Laughter, Good
Health and wonderful experiences to help me stay tuned to the Good Stuff and Get
My Glow On!☺

When we’re going through a tough time, we
want the support of our friends around us.But our friendships don’t always
survive the Big Transitions in our lives.

There are some people who start avoiding us,
and there are some people we start avoiding. And this makes room for wonderful new
friends. ☺

When I first moved into my flat I was so
freaked out about being on my own (living alone for the first time ever, at the age of 42!) - that I
arranged a roster of Betsey-Sitters to come over every evening and keep me
company.

I was deeply sad, traumatised and feeling very insecure and shaky – but one
thing’s for sure – I wasn’t miserable!
I know this because “misery loves company” – and there were a few friends who
liked nothing better than to come over and settle in for a long, bitter vent
about how all men were bastards and how hard life was.
This certainly wasn’t my view, and there was no way I was going to be a
co-misery!

I wanted to celebrate Life and enjoy good times and laughter with my friends - so
the ones who wanted a pity party were the first to go!

I soon realised that some of the people I’d
always been there for – the ones I’d supported night after night during their
break-ups, drawn-out divorces and times of unemployment and hardships- were not necessarily going to be there for
me.
I realised that most of them were simply so self-involved that they
couldn’t have pulled their gaze from their own navel. ☺

"The
shifts of fortune test the reliability of friends." ~ Marcus Tullius
Cicero

And when one or two friends realised that I
no longer had the same disposable income – they pretty much disposed of our friendship!
I couldn’t afford to join them for wining
and dining at the hip spots in town, and it turned out it wasn’t my company
they were actually after.
They’d call me up - and then turn down invitations to visit because they preferred
to be out and about.
So I haven’t seen them since. ☺

As any newly divorced woman is sure to find
out – there are some married women friends who drop you because they feel
threatened by your single status.
As if suddenly, now that you’re no longer attached, you’ve turned into some
sort of femme fatale with a rampaging desire to seduce their husbands.
Which is absolutely ridiculous,
because let’s face it – why on earth would I suddenly want their husbands? They
don’t even find them attractive, so why would I? ☺☺

Friendships do come and go in our lives - it’s
normal that some friends are with us at different times and stages.
But our true friends remain loyal throughout, regardless of time or distance.

My closest friends have been supportive, kind and generous and shown me the value
of what true friendship really means.

I’ve dropped the needy people, been dropped
by the shallow people, been supported by loving people and made some wonderful new
friends on this part of my GloWoman journey.

"A man's
growth is seen in the successive choirs of his friends." ~ Ralph Waldo
Emerson

We’re each on our own individual path and
we’re all at different stages on our unique journey. But we’re never alone.
Old friends and new friends are always there to love and support us along the
way.
Some align with us for a while and some align with us throughout lifetimes, and
all of them enrich our lives in their own way.

Our true friends encourage, support, inspire and uplift us, whatever our
circumstances - and we do the same for them. I wouldn’t accept anything less. ☺

For better or worse, we have to adhere to
the rules and legalities of our society. But are You placing unnecessary rules
on Your Wonderful Life?

Most of us spend our lives in a disciplined routine, which
is essential for streamlining, organising and getting things done.

But sometimes we place a lot of ridiculous rules on ourselves, which
can get in the way of our happiness.

One of my more ridiculous rules is that I can’t leave a ‘dirty’ flat.
This is my ridiculous rationale: “God
forbid I should die when I’m out and people should go into my flat and see how
untidy I left it.”

Which is truly beyond ridiculous, because I’m
an obsessive clean freak, and my flat is so clean you could eat off the floor –
so leaving a few dirty dishes in the sink hardly makes it a pigsty!

I’m a very disciplined person – focused,
organised and a little obsessive compulsive with my ‘rules’.

And there are certain things that I’ve
committed to doing first thing in the morning: my Facebook page post, going
for a run, and cleaning my kitchen.

But today was a Sod the Rules day – a Big
Thing for me!

A close friend and I had been trying to
meet up for a while. She rang me early this morning to arrange a coffee meeting.
At first I hesitated – I had a routine to maintain…

But because I hadn’t seen
her in ages, I agreed to break my routine and go!

Of course the sky didn’t fall in! It was
great to see her. We had a fabulous morning!

I’m certainly not going to chuck out my
discipline (I couldn’t anyway – it’s who I am!), but I’m happy to allow a
little leeway.

I’m better than I was - which has come with self-awareness of how
ridiculous a lot of my ‘rules’ were.

I now allow myself to enjoy a sunshiny
snooze on the couch on a winter’s afternoon – whereas before I used to think I had to sit at my desk during ‘work hours’. Really ridiculous considering I am
my own 'boss', and I work from home. ☺ (I often
tell people that being your own boss, could be the worst boss you’ve ever had!)

And while I was writing this post, I broke
another one of my rules – which is that I don’t take phone calls while I’m
writing. ☺
Well I did, and I’m glad! Because it was a friend inviting me to breakfast
at a gorgeous beachfront venue on Monday morning – what a great way to start
the week! Something super to look forward to! ☺

And perhaps it’s time to re-think some of
my other ridiculous rules – especially the one that says “You can’t have a boyfriend (at my age, I find the word boyfriend ridiculous!) until you’re back on your feet financially”Personally that one’s sounding like a lot of crapola to me.
If he’s the right one, he’ll love and adore me in spite of the fact that my
finances are currently lower than low.

What ridiculous rules are you placing in
the way of your happiness?Life doesn’t fit into neat little boxes. We've got to open up and make sure that our Joy
isn’t trapped and suffocating inside.

We all need to break out of our routine now and then, and allow ourselves to enJOY variety, creativity, relaxation and spontaneous FUN!
This is Your WONDERFUL Life – don’t let your ridiculous rules stop you from
Rocking your Happiness and Getting Your Glow On!

By the time I’d reached my
forties, I had morphed into a chain-smoking, lazy couch-potato who wouldn’t go
anywhere unless I could park my car right outside, or even better – inside!
Until - my then-partner had a thrombosis, a close friend had a stroke and
another one had a heart attack and gave me the
fear!

My partner M and I
bothgave up smoking, and started walking every
evening after work. Nothing like fear to motivate your lazy bum off that couch!
☺

M is 6’4’” tall with extremely long legs, so I had to walk quickly to keep up
with him.
After our first outing (which was less than 1km and accompanied by plenty of
moaning from me☺), I remember getting home and collapsing exhausted on the
couch!

But we kept going every evening, and it did get easier, and surprisingly to me
– enjoyable. ☺
We both started looking forward to it every day.

As M got fitter,
he was walking much faster, and I was really struggling to keep up with him.
I’d start running for a few steps just to keep up the pace.
And I’d see runners going past me and envy them. I wanted to be able to run!
I dreamed about being like those runners in the opening scene of Chariots of
Fire – running effortlessly along and enjoying myself ☺

So one day, I
decided I’d do it.
I was fit from all the walking and so I thought I’d just take off and go for a
run.

I told M I’d see
him at the end of the promenade and set off.
I made it as far as the length of four lamp-posts, before I ran out of breath and
felt like I was going to throw up and pass out!

But the next day I
did it again. Running as far as I could get to, and then slowing down to a walk
until I got my breath back and running a little bit more.
In the meantime, M and I had split up, and I moved to a flat right on the
beachfront.
I was traumatised by events, and my daily walk/run became therapy and still is.

Being out in the sunshine with crashing waves, flying sea spray and whales and
dolphins for company really helps to get my Glow On!
I think of it as my Moving Meditation ☺

After about a year
of running/walking I was chatting to a runner friend about my seeming lack of
progress. I could only get to a certain point (about 200 metres), before ‘running
out of steam’.
He was quite right when he said he thought it may be psychological. ☺
He said that if I could just push past that point, I’d be able to keep going.
Apparently if I was running blind-folded I wouldn’t know where that point was,
and I’d run past it.

So I took his
advice – and oh boy, what a breakthrough!
I ran my full distance of about 5kms without stopping. I was delighted!
I could now call myself a runner! ☺

Although,
admittedly I was still struggling along and running very slowly.
Sometimes it felt like I wasn’t actually moving forward at all – I had to check
the landmark next to me to make sure that I was passing it and wasn’t
actually running on the spot! ☺
Everyone would overtake me as I slowly jogged along.
One morning I got caught in a World Diabetes Day Fun Run crowd on the beachfront
and was overtaken by a one-legged man on crutches!

Once I was
overtaken by a really good runner, who steamed full-on up what felt like a 90°
hill (but is, in reality, only a slight incline!) - while I struggled,
huffing and puffing to the top. "That was really embarrassing", I said, when I eventually got
there. "I've
seen worse than you", he said.
I was delighted! I wasn’t the worst! ☺

Sometimes it felt
like my legs just couldn’t carry me on and I’d pretend I had wings on my back
and a pair of wings on each heel, to help me ‘fly’ along. ☺Amazingly enough, this
always worked.
I’d feel the extra power I needed to make it all the way.

I also realised that a lot
of the runners who came sprinting past me couldn’t sustain their pace – I’d
slowly catch up with them and notice they were walking – as I jogged past them
and smiled to myself. ☺

It has taken me a few years to build up stamina, and I’ve picked up a bit of speed, but I’m still
one of the slowest – and it doesn’t bother me a bit! ☺

Sometimes I bounce
along feeling full of vim and vigour; sometimes I sprint as fast as I can for
the sheer enjoyment of it - and sometimes my legs feel like lead and I
need to imagine my wings are powering me home. ☺

But the effects of being fit and feeling good are fantastic – and there’s no
way I could go back to being a couch-potato now – in fact the very idea
horrifies me.

I love knowing that I’m fit and that I CAN run. I’ve enjoyed running alone at
dawn in the African bush alongside warthogs and wildebeest, and I’ve dashed
right across London in the rain (smartly dressed and made-up for a posh lunch!)
when there was a snarl-up with the Tube and the traffic was impossible.

Of course you’re going to
think you ‘hate exercise’ if you’re totally unfit – because it feels likehard work! Admittedly, It’s not much fun when
you’re huffing and puffing and out of breath.
But once you’ve got over your phobia and built up your fitness, it’ll feel like
the most natural and uplifting thing in the world – because your body is
designed to move.

And not only will You start enjoying it – you’ll actually want to do it because it makes you feel sogood!

Feeling good is addictive
– and you’ll find that once you start, you’ll want to do more of the things that make you feel
good!

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Hi and thanks for stopping by! ☺︎
I'm an inspirational writer, motivational speaker and presenter in the field of Personal Growth and Development.
In 2010 I founded GloWoman® to inspire women to live their most emPowered and JOYful lives and Get their Glow On.
GloWoman® is an expression of what comes naturally to me: Positivity, Encouragement, Inspiration and Connection.
I offer inspirational talks; private consultations and mentor sessions and individual, group and corporate workshops to help women embrace their personal power, Rock their Happiness, shine their Light and Get their Glow ON!
When We Get our Glow ON, we CAN Light UP our World! ☺︎
Please get in touch, I'm looking foward to hearing from you :) Email me: bets{at}glowoman.org