The Joys of Credit Derivative Humor

Seller: … have I got the product for you. It’s called a reverse sub-micro-standard mortgage shadow security and — do you hold a degree in rocket science?

Buyer: Nope.

Seller: Hmm. Well then, simply put, what we do is take semi-insured debts that’ve been sold to us from inelastic bubble markets, vertically resell, then unbundle the revenues according to Moody’s astro-logarithm.

Buyer: Astro …

Seller: Astro-logarithm, which gives a monetized valuation that has itself been subdivided into A-3 and G-minus pumpkin patch. You following?

Buyer: Not at all!

Seller: Great; me neither, really! This thing was invented by some eggheads we keep in a cave.

And so on. How can you not love a financial crisis that produces credit derivative humor?