Evans applies a creamy layer of plant stem cells followed by an ultra-sound treatment, which pushes the nutrients into the skin 4,000 times deeper than they would reach by hand. Then the gloopy soothing mask which contains vitamins and minerals in an alginate base. It covers the eyes, nose and mouth before setting into rubbery contours for 20 minutes; Im feeling like the jelly inside a mould, setting for a party.

Just to ramp up the sci-fi element, Evans attaches galvanic currents at the top which make my forehead tingle and improve blood flow. It might feel a bit lonely behind the mask, but Evans is massaging my neck and shoulders, and Sandra Felicio, one of her colleagues, is suddenly at my feet, providing a reflexology treatment.

Once the mask is peeled off, theres still time for a facial massage with a copper wand for stress reduction and gentle face lifting, and an Intense Pulsed Light (IPL) PL laser treatment which stimulates collagen, evens out skin tone, and gets to work on pigmentation spots caused by sun damage. After 150 minutes of dedicated work, I now know how my car feels in the MOT garage.