You know, you hear the words “Heidi Klum in Versace” and a certain, shall we say, glitzy image comes to mind. Not this:

Heidi Klum attends the Puerto Azul Experience at the 67th Annual Cannes Film Festival in Cannes, France in a Versace gown accessorized with Bulgari jewelry.

Versace Fall 2014 Collection

Why Miss Klum. You look downright elegant. We’re not super in-love with the makeup, which looks a little harsh to us, although the lighting here doesn’t look like it’s very flattering. We really love the hair and jewelry, though. Tasteful and on point.

We just used “elegant,” “tasteful,” and “on point” to describe Heidi Klum in Versace. It am Bizarro day! Us hate beauty! Hello!

P.S.: We’re ready to admit we miss Project Runway. We need some Nina and Tim in our lives.

And it’s more body skimming than tight. Someone has kidnapped Heidi and put an imposter in her place.

conniemd

And it doesn’t have a leg slit up to her hoohaw.

lundibleu

That could explain the makeup. It’s far more harsh and ageing than Heidi normally goes for, particularly round the eyes.

sugarkane105

Love this! One of those times I wish the backdrop was a contrasting color.

tallgirl1204

Finally. The legs OR the bust. See how easy that was?

BayTampaBay

I’m amazed…she really looks good…instead of her usual “looks hot”.

crash1212

Who is this woman and what has she done with Heidi Klum?

3boysful

Klassy Klum.

SewingSiren

A little letter turny, but a vast improvement overall.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

LOL! Now I get it!

Joanna

Eh. I don’t like the seaming. But I will say that her actual beauty shines through when she stops trying to prove that she’s still got it, what ever “it” is.

YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

Too bad more women in Hollywood don’t get that message.

kimmeister

It comes across like ventilation for her nether regions.

Whever

I’m just waiting for the Dramatic Leg Reveal to happen, where she tears the entire bottom of the dress off.

Danielle

If you would have said Versace and Heidi Klum in the same sentence before showing these pictures to me, I would have pictured something more Nomi Malone-esque.

http://www.jaimieteekell.com/ Jaimie

I miss it too.

Josefina Madariaga Suárez

WOOOOOOOOOOOW

Capt. Renault

Perforated?

Targettaste

Like Pillsbury crescent roll dough!

IMNAngryLiberal

Who knew Heidi would clean up so very classy. This looks like a major BE ME and DO ME Heidi.

Kent Roby

Love! And I want to see a video of her later on when she spins really fast while the perforated skirt is ripped away to expose her usual look!

Whever

Wonder Heidi, with her superhuman Legs of Fierce!

judybrowni

Other than the silly upper arm straps (hope you had no need to raise up your arms for any reason, Heidi) elegant, chic, classy.

KCF

yeah, I really hate those straps. It doesn’t look like the model has them…what would inspire you to ask for them to be added? otherwise, def better than usual.

TheDivineMissAnn

Yes, ^^^this. Those arm straps are making my eyes twitch!

Is it my imagination, or is that tattoo on her arm of Seal’s name fading a bit? Perhaps she is in the process of having it removed? New man, new tattoo?

RussellH88

I kinda wish she had bigger hair.

And I hope everyone reads it as “Versayce” in their heads. If not, we can’t be friends.

Julie Chase

My friend and I randomly post screencaps of that movie on each other’s FB walls. It never stops amusing me.

Kent Roby

Um, obviously! I’m also rubbing ice on my nipples!

RussellH88

I’m putting red lipstick on mine.

Then I’ll probably settle in with a bowl of doggy chow.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

Is there another way to say it???

Alloy Jane

Oooh man, when I finally saw that movie I was like, “did she just say ‘Versayse???'” It was pretty funny/tragic. But I guess not everyone grows up in a world where one must learn the rules for pronouncing and spelling foreign names properly.

Seriously, she looks both sexy and classy. She usually gets one or the other, not both. Way to go.

http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

I feel like she saw pictures of Stacy Kiebler and realised that she could look sexy AND elegant.

KinoEye

It’s much better than her usual too-short/too-tight sparkly drag, but all I can see is a satin bedsheet that someone cut up and sewed back together. But please, Heidi, continue in this general direction. It looks good on you.

Anna

To Turn Into Mini-Dress:
1. Fold along dotted line
2. While folded, tear open at notch located at centre of dotted line

demidaemon

Jacob Bowen

Seriously, my 1st grade mind is SO with you at the moment!

SugarSnap108

I thought all those little slits in the skirt were gold trimming at first. I hate that they are, in fact, little slits. Still, Heidi looks great — and, yes, elegant.

Bonnie Blue

I thought the slits were gold trim also, to carry the theme of the straps. However, I agree she looks great.

YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

I miss when you guys did “Nina Caps”. They were awesome.

bitchybitchybitchy

At their D.C. book signing Tom told the crowd that Nina’s husband reads the Ninacaps to Nina-Love!

alyce1213

Just minor quibbles: I could live without the open seaming – it’s peekaboo, which is the only “of course” factor here, and the lower straps – they’re superfluous and slightly annoying. The cut of the back is absolutely, utterly gorgeous, as is the bracelet. ATTAGIRL, Heidi!

YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

WERQ.

Gatto Nero

Wow — it’s not short, tight, and shiny.
I need to go lie down.

poodle66

Simply gorgeous. Well done.

BlairBear

It looks cheap and kind of bedsheety to my eyes. Also those rips will never look anything but trashy to me. but hey her legs are covered so maybe thats a start.

Pennymac

Wow! Not only is this not horrible, its kind of not tacky! Except for the little slits, this is actually tasteful!

ashtangajunkie

It’s all so pretty! I feel a bit like I’ve been cheated out of an “of course.”

kimmeister

Has she lost weight? She looks even slimmer than usual. But maybe it’s because all of her body parts aren’t sticking out. Her hair looks lovely, and her jewelry is tasteful.

Sunraya

Yes, bizarro day. Heidi is classy!

@Biting Panda

Well done!

greymain

looks better on Heidi than the “model”…..who’d a thunk it?

Qitkat

Heidi wins the Diva-Off.

Clydette Wantland

Is she getting married? JK. She looks much better than normal because it’s not cut up to her hooha. How refreshing.

connie238

Off topic, but I love it when Heidi says the shoes are “naughty” in her Dr. Scholl commercial.

FibonacciSequins

It’s verging on fancy nightgown territory, but I like it. It has just enough detail to be interesting.

Is Michael Kors coming back this year? The show really suffers in his absence.

azaleap

It’s the best she has looked in years.

mjude

TLO Says:”P.S.: We’re ready to admit we miss Project Runway. We need some Nina and Tim in our lives.” DID YOU HEAR THAT BITTER KITTENS? or am I still in the bizzaro world hoping its true?

MilaXX

That’s why the show needs to stop the back to back stuff. We need time to miss them. Otherwise we get burnt out on all the foolishness.

Wink

To wear this much fabric she had to fight to suppress her inner hoochie. Well done!

Imasewsure

I love this! She looks gorgeous and sexy… someone got a grown up stylist? More of this please Ms Klum!

Judy_J

Is this our Heidi? I’m confused……

Janet B

Heidi, you still have IT!

Lilithcat

Not short, not tight, only a hint of shiny. Who stole our Heidi?

MilaXX

Surprisingly subdued and classy for Ms Klum. She looks lovely.

Man Dala

It’s a bit on the night gown side for my taste but she looks beautifully polished in it.

ktr33

It looks really pretty on her, and I love the back. I admit to an irrational and hot hate for drape-y necklines, but I know that’s subjective, so I give her an attagirl, but agree with the comment re harsh make-up, bc she IS capable of looking fresh and pretty in the facial region.

Vtg Fashion Library

For some reason I read that as “capable of looking fresh and pretty in the pelvic region.” Brought a whole new meaning to it.

ktr33

I *wish* that’s what I said! She can probably look fresh and pretty there, too. She’s Heidi.

Mothra

I like it, but it is kind of bridal and appears to be coming apart at the seams. That’s just bad sewing.

VicksieDo

…and it doubles as a nightie!

Jacqueline Wessel

“The Puerto Azul Experience Event” ??? They’re just making stuff up now. And Heidi looks lovely so I guess the Puerto Azul Experience was good for her.

http://www.bertkeeter.com Bert Keeter

Stunning! “HEIDI…You are the WINNER of this challenge! YOu can leave the Red Carpet”!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

Is she feeling well?? Does she have one of those new viruses I am hearing about on the news? Someone take her temperature, quick!

decormaven

Credit where credit is due- she looks good!

YourBaloneyDontGotNoSecondName

Heidi Klum, in Versayce, and I am not terrified that I will see something I don’t want to see. Girl That Is Not Your Convent.

kategs

I rather like this apart from the falling down straps which would drive me batshit.

LadyVimes

Other than the awkward seaming around the bust, it looks nice. Not excellent, but nice. And I like the hair.

http://cheekypinky.wordpress.com cheekypinky

Best she’s looked on the red carpet in *ages*.

bitchybitchybitchy

Elegant was the first word that entered my mind when I saw this-such a good change from Ms. Klum’s normal. I applaud.

As for PR-I’ll watch the next season-I always do, despite my grumbling. I need to hear Tim Gunn(or his robot replacement) utter the word “Desigggggnerssssss”

Trickytrisha

After all these years of stripper-esque Heidi, we now have tasteful, elegant Heidi? Hallelujah!

musi_

I shuddered at the mention of her name and Versace in the same sentence, but this has been bearable.

CT14

Personal best? She looks amazing, and I’m willing to give bad lighting the blame for the harsh makeup look.

Coolekat

Is the man slice still around?

Jeannie Shmina Greenwald

She should put on a few pounds and soften the harsh edges.

suzq

Wow. You realize, I cringe every time I see a Heidi post. She’s so gorgeous, but almost never showcases herself well on the red carpet. I really detest the chain straps and I’m not fond of the shiny fabric, but the cut of the dress is pure genius. Spectacular.

Sweetvegan

“We’re ready to admit we miss Project Runway. We need some Nina and Tim in our lives.” I hope this means you’ll blog the next season of PR? Or at least consider it? Pretty please with sugar on top?

DuBey2

Even if its only Nina caps each week?

St. Ace

Instead of Being John Malkovich, it’s Being Heidi Klum. She’s being remotely controlled by a Bitter Kitten!

FridaStaire

Do you think it unzips along those seams for a more classic Heidi look?

holla

love the dress, hair, and jewerly.

http://Reneesance.etsy.com Reneesance

A Bizzaro reference while talking about Heidi Klum and Versace, I love you guys! *sniffle*

Laura Abrahamsen

Bounty select-a-size dress.

VicD

LOL!

Scarlet39

Actually, it’s very tasteful and elegant. My one complaint is that I wish she would lay off the tanning.

veleri

thank you for saying that!

KayEmWhy

Heidi = “elegant,” “tasteful,” and “on point” is usually an oxymoron. She’s styling it this time.

James

She looks fantastic, love the look.

marlie

Heidi looks pretty fab! Sleek and slinky definitely works for her so much better than short, tight and shiny.

formerlyAnon

“We just used “elegant,” “tasteful,” and “on point” to describe Heidi Klum in Versace. It am Bizarro day! Us hate beauty! Hello!”

Dead fucking on. (And every time I think “It am Bizarro day!” I crack up. Bizarro world fascinated me as a kid.)

yethica

She looks nice. What I want to know is what is with that model’s hair? She looks like she had an extension put on the back of her head. And the face? DUCK FACE! No Zoolander on the runway, lady!!!

Clash D

Beautiful overall. But it seems those ‘undress me’ straps are IN again this season. God, I feel like taking a pair of scissors and cutting them right off.

DuBey2

Thank you, Uncles! I was just wondering if it was too soon to say the dreaded PR word on this blog, and how I am jonesing for a new season. And Heidi looks the very best I have seen her in 1 or 2 years.

i’m so glad to hear you miss pr! does this mean we might meet once more in the bar , shrieking together in delight over nina’s bitchiness? i hope so, i miss you. i recommend under the gunn, too. there was much more focus on the creative process and construction.

BuffaloBarbara

Wow – Heidi looks beautiful here. I just love this on her. And yes, that does seem weird for Klum in Versace.

Glad you guys miss PR. It was nowhere near as fun without having this place to come to and go, “HEH?” ;p

Andrea Lentz

I’d much rather see her in this than most anything else she has worn lately. Or ever.