midwest musings

Several years ago I started a blog (midwest musings) to feature my musings on parenthood, bad drivers, and horror movies, to name a few. It quickly garnered a small following, and has been a place for me to share my odd humor-and love of horror-ever since. Below are two blog posts from midwest musings. Find more by clicking on the calendar to the right (most October postings will be 31 Days of Horror movie reviews and other Halloween-related posts).

Bacon Heaven: A Gift for Every Bacon Lover

(Bacon Doormat)

Still searching for that just-right gift for a special someone this holiday season? You know who I’m talking about: that certain person in your life who seems to have everything, want nothing, and deserve, well, something. I have compiled the ultimate guide sure to make everyone on your list happy. Because everyone LOVES bacon (proven fact: even if they don’t like to eat it, everyone loves to smell it!).

BACON, IT’S WHAT’S FOR EVERY MEAL

For your friends and family members who do love to eat bacon, but still can’t get enough of that crunchy, meaty flavor, try these gift ideas:

And to top it all off: Bacon Beer in a Bacon Mug

WORK IT, BACON

For that fashion-forward person who can pull off anything:

BACON GETS PERSONAL

Great add-on gifts and stocking stuffers:

BACON HERE, BACON THERE, BACON BACON EVERYWHERE

Still haven’t found something that seems just right? Give these and you’re sure to be remembered:

Still looking? Here’s the ULTIMATE idea:

(Portrait of Kevin Bacon. Medium: Bacon)

Finally, after all this bacon, you might want to consider a more, um, long-term gift:

Just be sure to wrap it up the right way. No, not this:

This:

The Difference Between Men and Women

January 2015

By now you’ve surely heard that Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus, right? Well, it’s been over twenty years since John Gray’s book of that name brought this to our attention, yet the fact remains: the two sexes could not be any different if they tried.

I’ve compiled a small sampling of reasons we are orbiting this world on not just different planets, but in entirely different galaxies as well: