March 23, 2011

Bringing out the Crazy

Today was Crazy Hair Day at the elementary school. Basically you come to school with a dollar for charity and some crazy hair. It's somebody's crazy hair-brained idea to make a buck.... (HA! I kill me). We opted for a multiple braids with ribbons braided into the hair for more craziness! I wasn't completely happy with the bad parting I had started off with on the left side of her head so, in the morning my mild OCD hinted to me that it must be corrected. With all that wave from being braided overnight I just had to do something with it and so we put two frizzy pony tails into the mix. It was pretty darn crazy I tell ya. By the time we put together a crazyish outfit for Big Girl she was doing her hip-pop pose in the full-length mirror and I noticed her little sister getting a bit crazy with jealousy. Suddenly her outfit wasn't nearly good enough and her own hair was "ugly!" She pouted and whined all through breakfast and eventually got sent to her room so we could give our ears a rest.

This reminded me of a time when one of my sisters had a bit of the green-eyed monster with me. We were probably 9 and 16 at the time (me being older). We were on vacation in Idaho at the time for a family reunion. As we both got ready to go out to a play (Into the Woods- don't ask my why I remember this...), M looked at me with a sigh and said "No matter how hard I try, I never look as cute as you do!" and she meant it fiercely. I didn't know if I should have been insulted or thankful for the compliment. It was weird. And she had nothing to worry about since she was adorable. By the time she was sixteen she was batting of boys with sticks while at that age I was hugging the walls at stag dances waiting for anyone to notice me.

It must have been a good hair day that night in Idaho. But it struck me at the time and made me realize something about women. We are always sizing each other up in comparison to ourselves. Even for my Little Girl today watching her big sister look crazy/cute in her plaid pleated skirt denim jacket and grey chucks. Why (at 4!) does she get mad instead of just be happy that her sister looked cute? Where is the bouquet of flowers and tiara at the end of this day? It's not a competition! What am I doing wrong with my girls that makes them equate looking good as being better? How do I combat this?

Sometimes I think the better a person looks, the more society places them into a certain category of 'not that smart' or 'nothing on the inside.' And that's not fair either. I worry that some of these types may not rise to the occasions in life because they have already being labeled as 'just something to look at.' So I say bring on the acne some day for Big Girl so she can develop on the inside. But then bring on the clearasil because it just doesn't look good and we can't have that right? : )

It's after school... Little Girl seems to know how to hold on to her anger

Kelly

I am a forty something and stay at home mother of 5 children. We are currently living in the DC area. I like to write not only to record the goings on in our household, but to express my thoughts and opinions. I like cooking, sewing reading, exercising, napping and eating good chocolate.

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