If we were to be genteel, good Rapaire, we would cry, "Hear! Hear!", a widely-accepted form of approbation, rather than "Here! Here!" more commonly heard as reproof. But as we are not, I suppose we can say "There! There!" in consolation.

Well, in truth the approbation out here in Idaho is "Beer! Beer!" This is especially heard at various gatherings, such as those at the Legion Hovel or at Dirty Dick's Dark Dingy Diggin's (a local bar of ill repute).

Perhaps this is the place to mention the celebration last night at DD'sDDD. It was over the election, of course, specifically over the breakdown of the county's optical scanning equipment. They're not much for technology over at DD'sDDD, other than a bottle opener or a corkscrew or a bung starter.

While you were digging around down there for the church key you should have given MOM a boost.

Don't know about the rest of you, but I'm a little tired after staying up late to bask in the election returns. The icing on the cake was today's resignation. Let Bush through Rumsfeld in front of the bus--we're not fooled.

Good thing about living on the West Edge of the Western World is you get to hear all the news before you crash. Looks like Virginia is conceding to the Dem Jim Webb, and that will tip the Senate to the left of center (counting the independents who are so inclined).

I heard that when I woke this morning--breakfast was a very happy meal here! And of course I didn't mean to get metaphysical about Bush and Rumsfeld in my last post. He may indeed pass harmlessly through the bus if his particles are less dense, but I meant that Bush THREW him in front of the bus, causing a messy impact for a major distraction. Just in case our philosophers thought different.

Tonga has apparently created a new island in its attempt to take over the world! A yacht and a fishing vessel have both seen the new island, which has four peaks and is about a mile in diameter. Neither the Tonganese government nor the Tonganese defense forces have either confirmed or denied the existence of this new island, proof positive that not only does it exist but that it is being used by Tonga for their nefarious purposes.

The UN must act now, before it's too late and the US does!

There is no word yet about oil reserves or weapons of mass destruction.

If there are oil reserves on a volcanic island I would be astonished. There is a possibility of rare earths and radioactives, of course. Most effective WMD though, would probably be a fire/magma diety with a bad temper.

The Tongans out on Ganymede Have means of travel, various; (That's how they get to Ganymede To pursue their ends nefarious!) But though Rapaire sounds the alarm And sets the bells a-gongin' He cannot show a single soul (On Ganymede) who's Tongan.

Wrong! NASA and the ESA both say it's Tonga! And the CIA's report on the Tonganese military might is, shall we say?, sparse. Oh yes, Tonga is a threat to the world! For instant, this satellite photo, which shows the largest atomic cannon in the world (built in 1952) and which is currently housed near Junction City, Kansas (at the end of the zig-zag road in the center of the photo), is being readied for transfer to the Tonganese military! Courtesy, of course, of the Tongan-loving Bush Administration.

I hope that the new Congress stops Tonga before their plans become a reality!

Okay, you people can sit in your complacent homes and eat your complacent cheese, but you'll be happy to know that I've alerted the Idaho Legion to the Tongan Threat. Even as I type this they are readying themselves for the coming defense of the Homeland. Rifles are being distributed, knives are being whetted on the soles of boots, and horses are being saddled.

(Well, rifles WOULD be distributed if anyone could find the keys to that Arms Room, which most think that Pied Peter has with him, where ever he is. Somebody said that they think he was on a freight heading North or maybe East, so messages have been sent to Boise, Portland, Salt Lake City and Phoenix to be on the alert for him and to tell him that we need the keys to both the Arms Room and the Latrine.)

Yes, I did know that. The trolls are the worst part, always taking my pens so I can't write the checks and so the bills don't get paid on time. And they don't bathe unless they get caught in the rain or a sewer outlet or something. I tried every sort of troll repellent on the market, but found that the most effective one is simply bars of perfumed soap left lying around. Of course, the odor of these danged near repels me as well as the trolls.

The woman who recommended the book lives in Idaho, I think in Pocatello, so who knows, maybe you've crossed paths. She has an essay in it--sounds like a nice book to use for a fundraiser and do a booksigning with.

Ich haben a damned good idea for a fundraiser. But I'm after a fundraiser of a big massive sort, like several millions of US dollars. I want an endowment fund AND a building fund that'll expand the current place and fix the cheap-shit stuff they did when they built it. And I've got just the two books to reprint into one volume to do use, too. AND I've got century old roofing shingles and the branding irons to use on them.

HAPLR has rated us as the numero uno library for cities of 50,000 or more in all of Idaho. We rock! (And for cities of 50-99,000 in CA, NV, WA, OR, and MT we're 17th.)