In the interest of honesty I should tell you that I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder to start with. This yoga class – which is offered free, twice a week – takes place at a church here in town. Not the church I work at. Not a church I could see myself going to anytime soon. There’s a huge church in a neighboring town that Bryan likes to refer to as Six Flags Over Jesus, and while this particular church isn’t quite as large as that church, it could easily be the Dollywood of the local church scene. We get cards from them every so often, inviting us to a Christmas extravaganza or an Easter spectacle, usually involving a dramatic production paired with a carnival type thing going on outside, complete with rides and XBox giveaways.

It’s – how do I say – a little too WalMart Supercenter for me.

All this profound opinionatedness is based solely on those sporadic postcards, and my keen observations on the two times I had been inside the building, both times for community events that the church had hosted. Their building was bigger than ours, and they obviously had a lot more money to spend on all the things that go inside it than we do.

Not that I’ve thought about it a whole lot. Really.

Anyway, I go into class and as it turns out, the instructor is really nice. Really really nice. Nice enough that you sorta don’t even hate her for being really tall and skinny and pretty (that’s NOT all yoga. Some things just have to be chalked up to great genetics).

And perky. About every minute and a half, she would say my name in class, in a very cheery way, just to make sure I was getting it. The first time she said it – Sarabeth! – she scared me and I kind of fell over. Except that I was already on the ground.

This became a pattern. Sarabeth! we are going to start with a side stretch…Sarabeth! don’t worry if you fall off your bench, we all have…Sarabeth! you may actually die while attempting this next series…

Perky, very perky. And also very kind. She would say things like, that’s ok, just do what you can and beautiful, you’re doing great and you are enjoying this stretch of your lower back / quad muscle / insert any random body part here. These types of encouragements (or, let’s face it, flat out lies) are needed when you feel as though your body is about to betray you by throwing you face first onto the floor.

By the time we were done, I really liked her and I liked the class – this person who was a member of the superficial supercenter church. The same church which allowed us to use their room and yoga mats, blankets, blocks, benches, and bolsters. For free. That’s right, the church bought all that equipment so that this woman could teach her classes to people like me.

In related news, this evening I went to pick up my own new-to-me yoga mat from a fellow freecycler whose husband wasn’t using it anymore. I drove out to get it and ended up in the trailer park where they live.

Really? I thought. Yoga enthusiast lives in a trailer park? I would have never put those two things together.

It’s embarrassing, really, when I run up against these prejudices. Twice in one day – on both ends of the spectrum – my narrow view of the world, of trailer parks, of big flashy churches – got called out of hiding. These are not things I think about with my logical self, they are ugly, petty, jealous, prideful things that lurk in the corners of my heart. And they’re wrong. It’s not like I enjoy admitting this stuff, but my hope is – always – that if I can say this stuff out loud, pin it down on a page, that it won’t be inside me as much anymore.

Let me just say that there are many things I would like to be writing about but I am so tired that I keep falling asleep on the couch as soon as my kids go to bed. Now that I am past my earth day high, the reality is – it’s just hard work. Dang.

But here’s a quick update: We’ve turned over most of the dirt in our new little garden area, and my mom and I went and bought veggie plants from a delightful woman in our neighborhood. I have to say that’s one of the things I love about living in a relatively small town in the south – you can still buy plants from your neighbors. She’s got really cute signs out – and I love me some cute signs! – and she was so helpful. I’ve got her phone number if you want it…

So, hopefully soon those cute little plants will be in the ground. I think I’ve finally found a tiller connection…

And maybe then I’ll have enough strength to get some posts out there that have been running around in my head all weekend.

Last night, after snapping at my husband several times (on his birthday, no less – 35!) I sighed and said, “I just feel so overwhelmed. It’s like all of this information about things that are bad for my health and/or the environment is bombarding me. I’m not out looking for it – it just keeps finding me, every time I turn on the tv, or read a magazine…”

Bryan said, “Well, it is Earth Day this weekend.”

Oh yeah. A national observance, not the entire cosmos conspiring to bring doom into my life.

So, in that vein, I’m going to try to have a more positive outlook on the things I’m learning. Instead of saying “No – we can’t eat that anymore!” I’m going to find a fun alternative. Instead of focusing on the products I can’t use anymore, I’m going to find cute new ones.

In theory, anyway. So here’s my first stab at that. I’m sharing!

From flylady, I learned about babysteps – that even though my personality wants to get it right, all at once, that what will actually work is doing one small thing at a time (like I am trying to do with this whole earth-friendly, body-healthy thing). If you have trouble being organized, keeping your house clean, managing your time, having a decent attitude about life in general – you might want to try her out. She has helped me immensely. This site explains clearly how her system works and why flylady is great for actors and creatives in general. A note: I’m all about design, and I realize that her site is, well, not all about design. Keep in mind that she is providing a time-consuming, valuable service for free and give her a little grace…

One of the biggest things I have learned from flylady is how amazing it can be to get rid of clutter in your life – and a great help to me in that area has been freecycle.org. Again, this site isn’t winning any design awards, but it’s a very practical thing they’re doing. You know how you love giving something you’re not using anymore to someone you know will really use it? Well, this is about making those connections between people. Basically, you join an email list (use the digest format if you don’t like getting a ton of email) and when you have something to give, you offer it. When you need something, you ask. Its amazing how someone does really want that stuff – and they’ll even come pick it up – and also how many times someone else has something laying around that you need. This one is such an easy thing to do for the environment (less stuff ends up in landfills!)

As far as food / health goes – I switched us to natural peanut butter awhile back, basically because I read a short article (wish I could link you, but I have no idea where it is) that convinced me beyond all doubt to try and completely avoid hydrogenated and partially hydrogenated oils. It’s kind of freaky when medical people say that you can have some alcohol or fat or sugar or caffeine or almost anything, but then say there is really no amount of hydrogenated oils that are ok for you to have. You should have none. And they’re in everything. Really – look at your labels. Ok, I’m going over to the negative side now, so I’m going to change subjects. And I haven’t totally quit – I mean, I ate at Gadwall’s today. But I have made some changes…

I also switched to organic eggs awhile ago, because you can get them at Sam’s for not too much more. However, I am now switching to organic milk too, even if it is twice as much, because there was a horrifying snippet about cow hormones on TV this week.

And finally, the biggest positive thing I’ve done this week is…(drumroll please)… start a garden! We always had one growing up, and my grandmother was a terrific gardener – I’ll have to tell you about her sometime. I can’t wait for my kids to get to pick tomatoes! I can’t wait to eat them...