You look amazing. For your age, I mean. Maybe you've got good genes, maybe you've been reading Charla Krupp's How Not To Look Old, maybe you've even gone under the knife. But what about the rest of you? Your, you know, behavior. Are you acting older than you want to seem? Are you sure? Here's how to stop that.

Once, looking for a swimming hole in Maine, a local told me to turn left where the old school burned down. That's what giving directions is like these days. In this era of Mapquest and GPS, it's meaningless to tell someone to turn left at the church and go under the railroad trestle and look for the yellow house.

This is a weird one, contributed by my 18-year-old son Joe (see #2). Only old people leave voice mails, says Joe. Young people, accustomed to communicating by cell phone vs. land line, figure that the other person will see their number in missed calls and return the call if they want or need to talk. Urgent message? Send a text.