Tag Archives: arguments

Men love to fix things. We see every issue, every problem as a potential thing that we need to fix. If it is broken, squeaking, or just a pain, we can fix that. This might be true about physical things as long as we have a can of WD-40 and a roll of duct tape. However, when it comes to more relationship things, our methods don’t always work so great, but that doesn’t stop us from trying to fix it.

Just today Kate was talking about a situation in her photography business. I immediate deemed that she was being taken advantage of and without even a question from Kate to get me started, I dove in to telling her exactly what she should do to fix the problem. Before she got a word in edgewise I gave her a plan to change the situation.

You Can’t Change A Fixer

Fortunately, my wife was gracious enough to simply say, “I”m not sure that will work”, rather than blowing up at me. What could have been a big fight (and would have been in our past), was averted because she recognized that my need to fix was triggered by my interpretation of the situation as one that was taking advantage of (or hurting) her.

But You Can Fix Them

Brad says…. The playground taught me the biggest lie of all time. “Sticks and Stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” I don’t know who came up with this line, but there isn’t an ounce of truth in it. Words hurt. Words often hurt even more than even sticks and stones… Continue Reading

Kate says . . . There are times in every marriage when frustration mounts or hurts develop to the point where we want to say to our spouse “THIS IS SERIOUS!!!” As Brad shared in his post, “Delete the D Word” we feel the need to get out the gigantic highlighter and make our spouse… Continue Reading

Brad says… There is one word that does more harm to marriages than almost any other word in the dictionary, and yet I hear couples throwing it out over and over again. They shout it at the top of their lungs. They say it up while throwing their hands up in the air. They whisper… Continue Reading

Brad says… Kate’s post “He’s Not a Kid” got me thinking about how I acted earlier in our marriage. There were absolutely times that I was not the man who Kate needed. If I’m honest there were times that I was being a kid. As Kate admitted, there were times that she treated me like… Continue Reading

Kate says . . . Hi, my name is Kate and I’m a conflict avoider! Yup, it’s true, I dislike conflict and will do all that I can to stay away from it. On the other hand, when I cannot avoid the conflict for one reason or another, I like to move towards resolution. Hence,… Continue Reading