February 15, 2012

It's been more than a month since we've returned from our Disney vacation. Though the thought has crossed my mind more than once, I won't be writing about "re-entry." Because really, you don't want to know.

On to the final notes from our vacation:-). I loved meal time at Disney. Loved it. Again and again, we sat and talked and ate and just enjoyed being together. There's nothing like a family meal. Whatever it takes, do this at home.

Our Disney dining was dictated by discounts. As an ESPN employee, Mike has some pretty fabulous Disney perks. I dovetailed our reservations with the discount list in order to maximize our dining potential. Not all restaurants are on the discount list and most of the discounts are only applicable until 2PM. So, a late-ish lunch was our big Disney in-the-park meal. I relied on those snacks and made those lunch reservations as close to 2 as possible. That way, evening meals could be eaten later than usual and back at the hotel, where I cooked simply.

For breakfast, I packed heartily at home. We hauled granola and oatmeal and fruit into our hotel room (which had a full refrigerator). In Orlando, we stocked up on milk and eggs. A full breakfast happened every morning. We all knew we needed that breakfast energy to do happy things until lunchtime.

I made lunch reservations ahead of time. If we'd been at Disney during peak season, I would have had to make reservations six months or more from when we planned to eat. Since it was "slow" season, I made most of them about a week before we arrived there. Sometimes, I made last minute changes the day before.

Just like it's important to remember that the hotel is part of the experience, dining at Disney is entertainment. I can't speak highly enough about taking some time to research and then time to sit and enjoy--both the experience and your family.

Some highlights of the mealtime magic:

On a super crowded day at Magic Kingdom, we took a lovely, cool boat ride to the Wilderness Campground and ate at Trail's End Restaurant . The boat ride took us from the crowd and cleared our heads. We had the restaurant nearly to ourselves; the pace was relaxed and pleasant; the food was tasty and plentiful. When we disembarked from the boat back at the Magic Kingdom we were re-energized and ready for the evening.

We went back to Wilderness Lodge on another day and had so much fun at Whispering Canyon Cafe. The wait staff there truly are actors and actresses. Their schtick is that we are all a part of rowdy western bar and grill. They might be a tad "rude," with a goodnatured wink. Nicholas asked for refill one too many times. Our waitress said she was tired of him pestering her and brought him a giant Mason jar so he'd leave her alone. Stephen thought he'd be wise to that system and asked for "small refill." He got the Mason jar equivalent of a shot glass.

Two of our best dining experiences were near-disasters. The first time, I had carefully researched a counter service restaurant in Magic Kingdom for a quick, relatively inexpensive meal. It was really crowded (again) that day. We walked en masse, confidently, to the restaurant, hoping that a good meal would revive lagging spirits. When we arrived, we learned it was only open during the "busy" season. Seriously? That was so not noted in the book. The park was packed. Mike navigated across the kingdom and we ended up at The Plaza Resturant. He asked me about it. I told him the book panned it. He managed to talk the staff into finding us a table anyway. We were so hungry we didn't care.

My boys are still talking about those amazing sandwiches. We sat at a corner table as the sun set. There, we were treated to an enchanting view of Cinderella's Castle as it came up in lights on a beautiful Florida evening. Lovely. Just Lovely. It's that serendipitous magic, I tell you.

One day, in Hollywood Studios, I made a giant mistake and accidentally made us reservations for a prix fixe character lunch. Brain blip. I didn't realize it wasn't a price range a la carte restaurant. There was no way we could pay for that prix fixe without busting the budget. Mike explained the mistake and the manager went next door to the 50s Prime Time Cafe and found us a la carte seats there. We waited just a few minutes in a 50s "living room" and were cheerfully escorted to our seats. The restaurant had a charming atmosphere, where our waitress played the part of the mom in a classic 50s sitcom. We had a darling time.

On my birthday, we splurged with the girls and ate a Storybook Princess lunch at the Norwegian Akershus Castle. Mike and I had eaten there with Michael twenty years ago and I literally had not stopped talking about the rice cream and strawberries since then. Back then, there was no Google. Now, though, you can bet this will grace my table on a special day very soon. On that trip, our waitress' name was Kirsten. That Disney jaunt was my post-cancer trip. We were just a few months removed from chemo. The waitress was adorable and I told Mike that if ever we lived happily-ever-after and had a (second) baby girl, we should name her Kirsten. (The first baby girl was already promised to Mary and Elizabeth.) It was pretty amazing to sit in that restaurant 20 years later with our own Kirsten Therese.

All the food at Akershus was fabulous. Just fabulous. And the experience was every bit the storybook we had hoped it would be. The princesses came from table to table and talked with the girls. It was just darling. Unlike our very gregarious Sweet Karoline, Sarah Annie is shy and soft-spoken. Her speaking voice is barely a whisper. While every little girl in the room cavorted and jostled and chattered around her, she waited patiently to catch Ariel's eye.

February 02, 2012

In the months before we left for Disney World, we began to plan. Of course, there was research on hotels and rental vans and some reservation-making. Mike managed most of that. Once he had the dates nailed down, I started planning each individual day.

There were a few major planning tools. We read three books: Birnbaum's Walt Disney World,Birnbaum's Walt Disney World for Kids,The Unoffical Guide To Walt Disney World. The kids devoured every page of the kids' book. The other two books bounced around the house from reader to reader. I challenged every one to pick up little tidbits here and there that they could offer as we considered what to do each day. When we arrived, it was funny to hear them all quote the books while we were in the park. A few days in, we recognized that the books weren't always right. Still, they were a place to begin.

In addition to the The Unoffical Guide To Walt Disney World book, we got a subscription to Touringplans.com. This service will plan your entire day, one event and attraction at a time. For ten dollars, the site offers several different plans for each park: plans for just adults and teens, plans for tweens, plans for families of little ones, and big, happy family plans. I planned each day of the trip and printed the plan and put them in a three-ring binder. Honestly, the greatest value these plans had was my sense that I knew we were going to arrive at each park and not waste time getting the lay of the land and figuring out what to do when.

If you have a smart phone, skip the printing and binder step. We learned that Mike could download the plans right to his smart phone. He could also check (in real time) the wait time on any attraction and the crowd level at any park. Buy the book first and then the app. Book owners get a discount on the app. And really, the book is so worth the purchase cost. Touringplans.com also provided valuable "day of" information. We were reminded to be in Magic Kingdom the night of the Electric Parade. We knew that Dumbo (Sarah's absolute favorite ride) was going to be closed for renovations the fourth day of our trip and would remain closed a long time. We made sure to ride on third day. I can't begin to tell you how much we learned from those books. nearly as much as I learned from careful reading through Dawn's notes. There is nothing, nothing like another generous mom to mentor.

All that said, the plan is just a skeleton of what your day will look like in real life. Like any good plan, it works only as well as your ability to look at it critically and deviate if necessary. Despite our very careful planning and all our research, we missed a big detail. None of the sites or books told us months in advance that the Disney Marathon and Half-Marathon were being run the first weekend we were there. Not only were crowds much bigger than they were historically on those dates, the foot traffic inside the parks was re-routed for the runners. Our plans as written were as worthless as plans for a full co-op day the morning you discover your kids have chicken pox.

We didn't panic. We were determined to mine for the magic. As a result, we ducked into far more shows than we had planned, discovering the happy fact that Disney puts on a very fine live theater presentation--consistently, in every park, every single show. That crowded marathon day found us in Hollywood Studios as the runners ran through the main walkways. We sat it out in a stunning performance of Beauty and the Beast. I think it was my favorite attraction of all and it wasn't on the plan at that time. Days later, when crowds weren't an issue at all, we were lost and late in Animal Kingdom just as the Lion King show was beginning. So we stopped rushing to where we were going and stepped inside to take in the show. Absolutely awesome. I mean that. We were awestruck. That one wasn't on our list at all because everyone had told us to make sure to see the Nemo show and that was our priority. In the end, we saw both.

There were several times we vehemently disagreed with the opinions expressed in the guidebooks, mostly when it came to dining. I'll cover dining in another post. Within hours of our first day, I reconciled myself to the fact that autopilot wasn't going to work in terms of planning. The first ride we took with Sarah (who had never been to an amusement park) was Living with the Land. It's train-like ride that moves through a dark tunnel, into a lighter tunnel and then into a bright open greenhouse space. She hated the dark tunnel so much that the rest of the ride was tough. Then we went to The Seas with Nemo and Friends, another dark tunnel, a scary shark. Then, we moved over to the Mexico section of Epcot. Three Caballeros: by now Sarah was sure that Disney was all moving train-like rides through dark tunnels. On to Norway: The Maelstrom. Dark tunnel. Scary trolls. The ride got stuck. We sat there forever about twenty minutes. I talked and talked and talked to Sarah about what we were seeing and how it was built and anything else I could throw at the situation. By the time we were unstuck, she wanted to go again!

The plan is flawed or the plan goes awry, but something better than the plan comes to life.

That was easily the theme of our trip. Over and over again, serendipitous good things happened for us. I think being planned helped put us in position for some of them and certainly, reading up ahead of time and doing some research and availing ourselves to tools helped, too. But in the end, praying for grace and being open to the unexpected good was what made the trip great. I was also struck time and again by how well Mike was able to cheerfully reassure me that it was okay that the plan was going awry, all the while coming up with Plan B or C and steering us forward.

The big planning picture was important, but so was the micro-planning picture. We put thought into packing. That translated well when we grabbed a ziploc bag with a full outfit in it and laid it out the night before, so that girls could quickly dress themselves in the morning. We shopped well for breakfast items so that we wasted neither time nor money getting well-fed at the beginning of every day. We did laundry as we went, so that it never became a big pile of worry. We ended every day with the next one in mind, mentally rehearsing where and what we'd do and devoting a good deal of creative thought to troubleshooting.

I've heard stories from lots of moms with far fewer children than I have. They tell me how hard vacations, particularly Disney vacations, can be for them. There are classic articles out there about how difficult vacationing with children is. I think I was intimidated by those. The reality though, is that moms are overwhelmed at home, too. And moms write all the time to tell me how glad they are when there kids get on the bus in the morning. Homeschooling a big family is great training for taking one on vacation. Whether vacationing in Orlando, taking a huge trip to China, or just trying to do a good job at home on a gray day in February, the principles are the same.

Plan well.

Study up. Become an expert in the field.

Pray hard that you will know when and how to diverge from the planned path.

Think creatively about what may come.

Embrace the surprises because they often yield the greatest blessings.

Stay together.

Look to Dad for reassurance and another creative solution.

If you have to abandon the plan, abandon it for something better, not for sloth.

January 31, 2012

When I shared our packing adventures, I mentioned that I packed a cinch sack for each of us. These are lightweight bags that can be worn backpack style. My boys collect them by the dozen from shoe manufacturers and soccer tournaments. We had plenty of them just hanging in the mud room. As a matter of fact, Nicky thought he could pack for the entire trip in them. He couldn't. (But he did try.) Every day at Disney, I loaded each bag with a water bottle, some trail mix, and granola bar or two and, on one fateful day, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. If the children chose to bring iPods or Leappads with which to take pictures, they went in these bags. At the end of the day, I did bag management and turned them all inside out, gave them a good shake, and a quick rinse if necessary. The next day, I filled them again.

The snacks allowed us to avoid "hungry crankies," for the most part, and easily let us delay lunch until around 2:00, when most of the lunch crowds had already left the restaurants. Water bottles were easily refilled at water fountains. I can't overstate the importance of snacks and drinks. All I'll mention is that some of us had neither on the last day. Furthermore, at Animal Kingdom, there are no tops on drink cups, so if you want to walk and sip, you are out of luck without a water bottle. Ask me how I know.

About "buddies." One of my biggest fears was that we'd lose a little girl in the crowds. This fear was magnified when we realized that the crowds were much, much bigger than we had anticipated. We did not, however, employ a buddy system. I'm well aware of the much-touted use of buddies in big families. An older child is assigned a younger child and takes the responsibility of helping with everything from getting dressed to going potty to making sure he doesn't get lost. Mike and I made a conscious decision not to assign buddies. We wanted our big kids to be on vacation. We wanted them to relax and not to live in constant fear of crowds and at the constant mercy of the demands of little ones. As a family, we talked about how important it was to stay together and we made sure to impress upon all of them to watch out for each other, but Mike and I assumed all the responsibility for keeping an eagle eye out and doing frequent head counts. If a big kid hoisted a little one onto his shoulders, it was because he wanted to have her there, not because it was his assigned job.

Sarah spent nearly the whole time strapped to me. I think we were all glad to know where she was. Karoline flits around every day and all the time so we did have to keep a close eye and her and if she walked, she held a hand. I brought an umbrella stroller. Then, truth be told, when I learned that free stroller rental was one of Mike's perks, I rented a double stroller every day. And we used it constantly. It was big and sturdy and ever-so-helpful for tired little people who couldn't walk fast enough to keep up with their big sibs. When the crowds were super bad, we put Katie and Kari both in the double rented stroller and Mike pushed. Everyone was secured in big crowds, particularly when the big boys were with us, because Patrick and Christian corralled those "little" boys in their own special ways.

I have to say I loved holding them close. I loved being "just us" in the middle of crowds. If there is one magic thing I could have bottled and taken home, it would be the permission to be fully available and fully present to my children all day, every day. We were very blessed to stay in two bedroom villa with a living space and kitchen between the rooms. The kids had one huge room (with big boys sleeping in the living room) and Mike and I had a beautiful room with our own bathroom. We had time at night to be grownups and get away from the constant noise and activity of children. But the days? The days were all theirs. And we wouldn't have had it any other way.

January 26, 2012

I'm kind of tired of writing about Disney details for this week. I still have three more posts queued up and waiting for pictures and edits, but I think they can wait until next week. Yesterday afternoon yielded an impromptu visit to the park and Mary Beth took some fun pictures with her iPod and I thought I'd just hang out here with you for awhile and think aloud about my friend Susan's last ever post and about all the wisdom there and about living a slow life.

I've been praying hard lately about slow. Quiet. Whisper. I've been praying about creativity and asking God what He would have me do. And I don't have a crystal clear answer. Colleen called this afternoon to tell me all about how she walks at least three miles a day just to get anywhere. She told me about her kitchen with the lattice walls and the simplicity of it all. She was asking me to think for myself about how to bring mindfulness, slowness, simplicity to life in the suburbs of the the most powerful city on earth. Seems daunting. But then again, swimming against the tide is always slow isn't it? There's nothing slow about this place; I'd be swimming against the tide if I were even trying to move slowly.

The internet is fast. I feel my pulse quicken when I open the laptop. Text messaging and cell phones are fast. I watched a dear girl's furrowed brow grow smoothe when she let her battery die and took days to get around to recharging it. It is clear to me that we must be ever-vigilant lest we let technology fast forward our lives and infringe on the margins of clear, quiet space where we can just be still and know God.

Susan writes, "We live in a time when slowing down does not simply mean that we casually choose not to get caught in the speedy flow of our culture, but, increasingly, we must absolutely do battle against speed in order not to get caught up in the flow. And nowadays we have the added pressure placed on us by modern technology to be ever-available and always-distracted. But battling against this is very much worth the fight, in my opinion."

It's not just technology though. Interactions with our fully present community seem to demand expediency and efficiency. To be intentionally slow and soft requires a decided change in thought process. I find myself countering the activity of real life. This quiet is encapsulated in all the intentional choices to just be when the world asks us to hurry towards productivity. It's the wide open spaces in a day that allow us to look at the gift of a warm winter afternoon from the top of a swing.

" 'All in order, sweet and lovely.'(Blake) And I’ll quote the Bible, too: 'For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.' And why not thrown in Anne Morrow Lindbergh who said that it is only framed in space that beauty blooms? And all of this goes for our whole life; order is not just about the arrangement of our stuff! A beautiful life of margin saves space—uncluttered and unhurried—for the unexpected, for surprise, for serendipity, for spontaneity, for compassion, for instant hospitality, for relationships, and for lots of good things to happen."

The internet has blessed me in so many ways. Daily, my life is touched for the better by the people I have met online. I am grateful forever for blogging--the medium suits me well. But I think I am a slow blogger. I cannot--will not, perhaps--keep up with the frantic pace of being everywhere online. Networking zaps me. The internet allows us to be pulled into the extroverted world without every leaving home or saying a word. I think it could be an unnatural exposure for an invtrovert.

Sometimes I am sure I would love a house like this, not to live in, just to retreat to when the noise and activity become too much. My children remind me that we have a playhouse at the edge of the backyard. And almost automatically, I think, "Hmm, I could probalby still get wi-fi there." I am a paradox.

But frantic pace and constant availability zaps me even more in real life. I asked a friend yesterday for the phone number of a mutual friend. She sent it and asked if I'd ever heard their musical answering machine message. I replied that I'd never called her. She's a very close friend. We correspond nearly daily. I love the sound of her voice and could sit for hours in real life and just listen to her talk. I love when she has time to share a converation with me. She's called me a couple times. But I've never called. Still haven't. Because in real life, it takes a huge effort for me to dial the phone. The older I get, the less I like to shatter silence with my own voice, the less I want to intrude on someone else's silence.

When I was little, people thought I was pouting or moody. I will never forget the day--I must have been around nine--when someone asked why I was so grumpy within earshot of my grandfather. He took one look at me and said, "She's not grumpy; she's pensive." It is forever inked in my memory. Understanding. He understood that I was not moody or aloof or even shy. I was just thinking. I need quiet. I need deep, face-to-face connections.If I have a conversation, I'd prefer for it to be a slow, thoughtful one. I need fresh air and sunshine. I need space to think. I don't think quickly.

And then, I also need space to do. To work with my hands. To ink out a thought. to capture an image. Wide open space to make connections to my Creator within my own soul and spirit with before I can make sense of anything else.

I put up two prayerrequests this week for boys not unlike my own. Indeed, one of them played soccer with my eldest. I can't pray for them and for their families without feeling an overwhelming tug of empathy. And an overwhelming urge to hold my children. (At the same time, though, I'm compelled to bring their intentions to as many people as possible and I'm grateful this medium allows me to do that.) Life is full and rich and joyous and sad. And we need margins to make sense of it all, don't we? And life is short. I'd prefer not to waste a single moment of it.

When I was on vacation (ah, see? there's Disney again), my time online was naturally limited. I spent a few minutes a day (fewer than fifteen) uploading pictures so that our families could follow our fun on Facebook. It was just the right amount of time for that kind of connecting. And then, I spent hours and hours out of doors, holding my little one, listening carefully to the others, giving full time and undivided attention to the here and now. Despite the noise and color and crowds of where I was, it was a peaceful way to live. Certainly all of life isn't a vacation and I can't expect to come home and act as if I'm living in a resort villa, but I think I can impose upon myself some of the same expectations for limits here and wide open spaces there.

God is in the margins.

I'm not logging off forever. I'll likely be back tomorrow. Because I need to write. I need to take pictures. I need to put it all together and make sense of it for myself. And for some reason, I'm am compelled to share it with you. Gosh, I'm grateful you pause with me. And I do hope that this little corner of my world can be a quiet respite for you. Because really, I'm all about the quiet.

January 24, 2012

The last time I drove to my mother's in Ponte Vedra, Michael was eighteen and Karoline was an infant riding backwards. Mike flew in to meet us there. I drove the whole way. Karoline cried the whole way. It took us fourteen hours. I waited nearly five years to repeat that trip.

This time, Mike drove. Everyone is old enough to ride facing forward. And I applied everything I have ever learned about packing and planning for the car. here's the brain dump.

Packing::

We began the packing process early and took our time working through it thoughtfully. Mary Beth was a huge help. Totally umprompted, she presented me with packing lists one morning and showed me how she had begun to gather into a laundry basket t all of the extra things we would need. Those basket items were then divided into things we would need in the car while we traveled and things that could be packed and put in the back. Then, it was divided again to cut down on what we actually needed and didn't need. The kids' bags were laid out on the floor, packed, checked, unpacked, repacked, checked, and one more for good measure;-). I'm happy to report no one underpacked (though a certain 13-year-old boy overpacked).

We were lucky enough to have a washer and dryer in our hotel suite, a feature that was a huge help with eliminating extra clothes. I did laundry every day at my mother's house and every day at Disney World. The only dirty laundry we brought home was the laundry we were wearing. That made transition to home a bit easier. The packing lists we created for the children included 3 pairs of jeans, 5 shirts (3 long sleeved, and 2 short sleeved), sweatshirt with hood, bathing suit, pajamas, underwear, socks, baseball cap, and sunglasses and clothes to wear for dinner at the club and church. The older kids were in charge of getting their car 'toys' into the car while the youngers had theirs packed in an extra bag (more on that later in the post).

A note about shoes: About three weeks before we left, I took inventory of the shoes each child planned to wear while walking at Disney.I made sure they were in good repair and fit perfectly. I ended up buying new pairs for a couple of children and then encouraging them to wear them often before we left so that they'd be broken in and we'd catch any ill-fitting blister issues before leaving.

Car Bag 1 (this is a euphemism. We actulaly called it the "Throw Up Bag."). The first car bag was packed with things we potentionally would need while we were in the car (a bag that wouldn't get packed and be unaccesible in the back of the car). We have several children who are prone to motion sickness. This bag was the go-to bag when someone started to gag. It included baby wipes, clorox wipes, gum, snacks, waterbottles (they weren't IN the bag but nearby), and plastic bins just in case of car sickness. I used these bins, so that I could put the lid on it and dispose of it as soon as possible. I also packed a roll of scented trash bags for nasty clothes and clean up trash. In the accessible car bag, we included a change of clothes for each of our two littlest girls.

Extra Things Bags: This was a catch-all bag for the stuff of every day living away from home. It included

blister packs (happy to say no one in our family needed them, but I did give one to someone else)

nebulizer

cold medicine

Airborne

sunscreen (something we definitely DID need)

Advil

breakfast food and some patnry items for meals prepared in the hotel. we ate all our breakfasts and some dinners in the hotel.

glowsticks, needed for extra magic at night and great for helping to keep track of kids at the nighttime parade and fireworks

garbage bags

laundry soap

paper towels.

Tide to go

Cinch sacks for everybody. I'll explain these in further detail in a later post, but we packed an empty cinch sack for each of us to use daily while we were there for water and snacks and other essentials. The boys regularly collect these at soccer tournaments and from shoe vendors, so we had planty of them around the house. Sarah's bag was the only one that was different. She had a teddy bear backpack that was a birthday gift. Since I ended up carrying her and her packpack more often than not, I'd think differently about her backpack if I had it to do again. My backpack was a frontpack. Sarah rode in it. So, my pocket for water and snacks was super small. I still managed to put trail mix in it and to stash a few bandaids, Tide-toGo, and lipgloss. I carried this purse with me everywhere. The size, the zippers and the velcro while I walked through throngs in the park made it perfect! (And here I admit that it made me happy that my hipster and my baby carrier happened to coordinate. It's the little things;-).

AeroBed Sleep Tight Bed: So worth the money! This bed is extremely easy to inflate and so cozy to sleep in. If you need extra beds in the hotel room I strongly recommend these. i didn't pack these from home. My Aunt Lisette had them for her grandchildren and mentioned them to me. My mom borrowed them from her while we were staying at my mother's and then I packed them to take to Disney. I plan to buy some of our won. Katie and Sarah slept on them. Katie is nine and had plenty of room. One night, Sarah woke and I laid down next to her to put her back to sleep. I comfortably spent the rest of the night there.

For the older kids they had the things they wanted in their own bags/pockets so they weren't forgotten. They mostly occupied themselves with iPods, laptops, and the occasional Kindle. They also slept a whole lot. iPod Touch: This is 14 hours of teen and tween peace at your fingertips, from Nick to Christian, all of the older kids had music, HD video camera, game apps, and, when needed, iCloud to find misplaced iPods. Audio books can be downloaded to these also and they can listen to them while playing apps. While in wifi zones, the kids could also play Words with Friends against each other, update to Facebook, and check ESPN game scores.

For the younger kids, we kept their LeapPads, batteries, and headphones in one bag ready and accessible to them. This was Car Bag 2, another accessible bag with extra batteries, markers, drawing paper, crosstich projects, extra embroidery floss and Kids Travel (by Klutz). This book matches its description as a backseat survival kit. Everyone had something fun to use in this book, it is definitely complete. Even if you don't plan on going on a trip anytime soon you might like this book, lots of fun mess-free things to do.

About the LeapPad in Pink and LeapPad in Green.: These have gone up in price and are still extremely hard to find in stock. We bought them for each of the little girls for $99 each and that was their Christmas present from us (we don't do Santa--so the Leap Pad was it). I let them play with them Christmas Day and then I put them away until the trip. The recommended age is 4-8, but I think it suits a much wider span. Sarah is three and LOVED it, and Stephen (13) and Nick (11) might have spent more time on them than Katie. Also, once we got to Disney these were great to have when they wanted to take pictures or even videos of Disney World,.The camera isn't the greatest but it is not awful and it captured for them what they wanted to remember. We only let them take the Leap Pads into the park on one day because I really didn't want to mess with carrying and remembering them. LeapFrog always does things well and this product is no exception.

Make sleeping comfortable. We packed a pillow a person and some throw blankets..Those throw blankets were passed all around and helped tremendously when one person wanted the air conditioner up high and another person didn't want air conditioning at all.

Snacks on the Way and Border Treats: We packed a variety of snacks so that we could stretch time between stopping for meals and keep carsickness at bay. I tucked in granola bars in three different flavors, crackers, goldfish, trail mix, and things that would hopefully not make too much mess in the back. I did vacuum after arriving in Ponte Vedra, after returning to Ponte Vedra from Orlando, and after we got home before we returned the rental car.

For my own entertainment, I packed some embroidery and some lovely floss. I had visions of stitching merrily for hours while I chatted with Mike. The reality was that I stitched a wee bit and then recognized that the van was not the smoothest ride and getting that needle right where I wanted it wasn't happening. Besides, the shifting light along the treeline as we traveled, combined with the needlework, made me start wondering about whether that Throw Up Bag was for me, too. I also packed a bunch of old design magazines, some glue, and a blank sketchbook to create an idea journal. That took about an hour:-). There were some new books, both print and audio awaiting me on my Kindle, but that just seemed rude to Mike, who was doing the real work of getting us there. Mostly, I just kept keeping the little girls happy.

In order to maximize the benefit of gas and meal stops, I insisted everybody "give it a try" every time we stopped at a bathroom. For the most part, this strategy prevented the dreaded "I have to go" fifteen minutes after having just stopped. I will admit that I grew very, very weary of lifting Sarah onto every public toilet along the southeast coast.

On the way down, the girls were battling carsicknesses mightily. Mike and I decided on a sitdown late breakfast at Cracker Barrel. After that stop, they were considerably better the rest of the trip. So, it was probably time well spent. But it did slow us quite a bit. On the trip home, we snacked more and stopped for fast food and potty breaks, but ate meals in the car. All in all, our best coping strategy for little bladders and motion-sick girlies was to accept it and just roll. We did what they needed and didn't try to push past their limits.

One more note: we don't have a vehicle big enough for all of us any more, so one of our major expenses was the renting of a 15 passenger van. We had plenty of space for all of us and all our stuff. The thing gobbled gas, though.

This trip was so much better than the last one. As long as Mike is with me and willing to drive, I'd easily do it again. Soon. Maybe this summer?

{{This post, the PDFs, and all of the packing that went into the education that informs this post, would not have been possible without bushels of cheerful, thoughtful help from Mary Beth. }}

January 23, 2012

It's been said that a vacation is a crucible of family life. When a family takes a vacation, all the good things about that family are better; they glow golden. And the not-so-good things? The flaws? The places we need to improve? They stand in stark relief against the very good.

I hope to spend a few days making observations and passing along some ideas fresh from our extended vacation. I hit a few of the biggies here (in a now-expanded, complete with pictures post). Today, I'm going to take on the not-so-good, the bumps in the road where I wish we could have a do-over. There are just two nuggets here.

Eat, Sleep, and Pace Yourself. The meltdown started on Disney Day 7. We had wonderful lunch in a super-fun place. Spirits were high despite the poor weather. We had made a decision--because of the weather--to go to the Disney Store (the biggest one in the whole world) and allow the children to spend the Christmas money Grandpa and Barbara had designated for Disney World. Everyone else went to the Disney Store that day, too. It was big and noisy and overwhelming. Sarah and Karoline wanted to hold everything they saw while they tried to make decisions. Mike and I were being pulled in six directions and we were trying so hard to please. Some of us were so overwhelmed that we couldn't make a clear-headed decision and left with nothing.

We left Downtown Disney and decided to take the rest of the afternoon and do short return trip to Epcot. After a quick trip back at the hotel to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for dinner, we were off. Mike took the big kids in one direction. I took the littles in another. While standing in line for Nemo inside the aquarium building, I looked at my phone to see what time it was. I noticed I'd missed a text. I read a heartbreaking message from Colleen. Trapped with my little girls in line and no cell service, I swallowed, blinked back tears, and prayed. When I connected with Mike, he took everyone back inside and I went out to make a phone call.

After the call, I tried to pull myself together, but my heart wasn't in it. All the fatigue of the previous week started to gather momentum. The kids were getting increasingly cranky and we decided to eat dinner. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. One of the adults doesn't eat wheat and had neglected to pack anything of substance without it. One of the adults doesn't like jelly with his peanut butter. I've known this fact for about 30 years. In my efficient assembly line sandwich-making, I'd forgotten. Two hungry and tired adults. Wet, tired, hungry kids. We called it a day and went back to the room.

I might have dissolved into a sobbing heap. We might have made up and slept hard that night.

Overslept.

We needed to hustle to pack up the van and get out of the hotel. Since it had rained the previous day, we'd left Animal Kingdom for the last day. I buckled an exhuasted Sarah back into the Ergo. It was the warmest day we'd had. Not hot, but more uncomfortable than not with a three-year-old strapped in an infant carrier. Everyone was tired. And everyone was sad. We were leaving. Oh, and I had skipped breakfast to pack the van.

My aunt tells me that my cousin has had a meldown in front of the Tree of Life on two separate trips. She's the mom of four little ones. There must be something about mothers of many at Animal Kingdom. The park is designed around this huge (fake) tree. There are spokes to amusements all branching from that tree. If you walk too far, missing the sign telling you your intended destination is down a particular path, it is highly likely you will walk a long way. Indeed, walk a long way very quickly, so as not to miss the FastPass window. Over and over again. Carrying the preschooler. You might be tired. You might miscommunicate with the person you love most in the whole world. And you might keep up the family tradition of falling apart in Animal Kingdom. And then you will be very sad because it was not The Perfect Trip.

I wasn't the only one struggling. I've never been one to tell tales on my family members here, so we'll leave it at that. We'd all had enough. We were all hungry and tired. Too tired. In hindsight, we should have taken the previous day to just eat a good meal and hang out in the hotel. I think there is a tendency at Disney World to forget that the hotel is a part of the experience. If we'd soaked up a little more hotel and a little less crowded-noisy-crazy, we might have saved the last day from despair. But there is a corollary that is probably even more important for me.

Lessons from Disney for Life: It Doesn't Have to Be Perfect to Be Very Good

I have tendency to see things in black and white and to be incredibly hard on myself. Either it was the perfect trip or it wasn't. I beat myself up over jelly on peanut butter and miscommunication. I took too personally the expressions of other people's fatigue and hunger. I focused on the imperfections and I might have missed the fact that this trip was very, very good. We returned to my mom's house that night utterly exhausted. We slept. We awoke to a relaxed day and an evening of good food and laughter at my aunt's house. Perspective restored, we drove all the way home the next day, proud that we'd done really good things.

It might seem strange to begin a series of vacation posts with the end of the trip and the only negatives, but I wanted to make it clear right from the get-go that we are real people with real frailties. I have a couple of close friends who have compared notes with me over the years on the "vacation fight." It happens almost universally (but I'm still shooting for the vacation without one). We've mutually agreed that if any of us texts another with the message "St. Joseph prayers needed now, please" from a family vacation, we are to pray hard. No questions asked. No details necessary. And none given. Stuff happens. Strong families survive and thrive despite the stuff. They might even improve because of the stuff.

We took eight children from 3-19 to Disney World, traveling from DC to Orlando in a big, rented van. It wasn't perfect. But it was good.

January 22, 2012

I wrote a column while I was in Disney World. I had lots and lots of thoughts about the "magic" and what it means for our everyday lives. I hope to have some time soon to get more of them written so I don't forget. For now, though, there are these few. And for those of you who have commented on the height difference between Mike and me, I'm 5'2". If you read the column, you can do math and know just how far up I gaze;-).

~~~~~

Updated to included the full text and some more pictures here:-)

I’m writing this column from Disney World. My husband and I have been here for nearly a week with eight of our children. We have had a truly wonderful time. Some would call it “magical.” Surely, it seems magical, but I know that, despite all evidence to the contrary, there is no magic. There is something else at work here. Since we arrived, I’ve been trying to pin down exactly what forces are at play to create Disney Magic. Although I’m certain that volumes could be written about the topic, I’d like to toss out just three ways that the magic makes our days here incredibly joyous, three things we can take home when we want to bottle it up and bring it north.

Embrace a passion for creativity and hard work. The parks are sparkling clean and every detail is thoughtfully appointed. It’s more than just good organizational management. It’s a philosophy of creativity, cheerfulness, and work ethic. Every single person who works here knows his or her job and does it cheerfully, with excellence. Disney Magic is what happens when creativity meets diligent hard work in a well-supervised environment. When confronted with a bump in the road, there isn’t any whining or temper-flaring on the part of the Disney cast. Instead, they work to find a pleasant answer—it’s obvious that they are thinking creatively and it’s obvious that they are putting forth their best efforts to make “magic.” The magic isn’t magic at all; it’s just cheerful hard work. There is an expectation that we will all be cheerful together here and everyone seems to be in on the effort.

Follow Daddy; he’s in the lead. It’s been very crowded despite our best efforts to be here on historically less crowded days. Eight children working their way through the crowds in a place where kids and adults alike are easily distracted can strike terror in everyone’s hearts. In our family, Daddy is 6’4”. He has a different perspective on Disney than anyone else—literally. He can see the bigger picture. He’s also a commanding presence. If he’s pushing the stroller through the crowd, the seas seem to part a little. He’s even keeled. He has a plan and he’s considering everyone’s best interest as we move forward from one experience to the next. It works for Dad to lead.

A corollary to this principle is to snuggle the wee ones close. I would have thought that my three-year-old had long since abandoned the frontpack carrier, but that is where she’s been happiest while we’re here. I have held her close and she’s taken in the sights and sounds from the safety of my arms. It’s done us both a world of good. Almost magically, we are relaxed and we have plenty of energy, despite logging in an average of seven miles of walking a day (no small feat while carrying 25 pounds of toddler). There is much to be said in favor of holding them close for as long they need us.

You are royalty. Act the part. It didn’t take long for us to figure out the every cast member is trained to refer to a little girl as “princess.” And every single time a ticket taker or waiter or bag checker told them to “have a beautiful day, princess” that little girl would stand up straighter, smile wider and walk with a little spring in her step. They aren’t really magic princesses. But they are daughters of the King. They are heirs to Heaven. Do they know it? Do I? Can we treat each other as such even after we drive north from the magical sunshine of this place into the real workaday world? I hope so. I hope magic can meet memories and we can continue to live the lessons of this vacation.

January 16, 2012

and wishing it would snow. I've been treated to the sunshine and fair winds of Florida for the last two weeks. Now, I'm kind of hoping to hunker down and cozy in at home. A snowstorm would be just perfect right now--a chance to just be home and be settled. Otherwise, all the little grids in my planner are daunting. Really daunting.

::listening to

Mike's Blackberry chime. He's sitting here beside me. This is a rare event because I try to stay away from the computer when he's around, but he's been around all the time for two weeks now, so we're making an exception.

::clothing myself in

a Disney sweatshirt:-).

::giving thanks for

a safe trip

fine weather

the chance to visit with my mother and stepfather and my dear aunts and uncle.

Disney magic (which isn't magic at all--more on that later. Much more.)

::pondering prayerfully

If creativity is a habit, then the best creativity is the result of good work habits. They are the nuts and bolts of dreaming. ~Twyla Tharp

::clicking around these links

No clicking. I just deleted over 1000 new posts on Google Reader. I sure hope I didn't miss anything really good. Let me know if you know of a not-to-be-missed link from the last two weeks. Oh, but do read this article. Michael told me about it and seconded it by telling me of a similar interview at USA Today. This guy is for real.

Gosh! I have a whole list of things I've been itching to get to do. I'm going to start with a baby quilt for a dear February baby. And I think I'm going to try one of these scarves for myself. I think I'm on a little bit of scarf kick. And I promised every child in my family a flannel cozy. They want them yesterday. It's cold and they're complaining just a bit. Oh, and I'm thinking about Project Life. I'd really like to jump in. I have the kit and everything to go back and record my big boys' millions of picture currently in shoeboxes. But, oh, that digital idea? It's very, very tempting... On the other hand, it's a Shutterfly partnership and I 've been disappointed with the quality of shutterfly's printing on calendars and cards lately. Anybody have thoughts on this?

::learning lessons in

organization. I've been taking notes, at least mentally. I've come to the conclusion that some of the happiest, most creative places I know are extremely organized. I'm very motivated to re-visit my long-forgotten home organization notebook, update it, and implement some other organizational ideas I have buzzing in my brain. Within hours of arriving home, I'd completely cleaned out the pantry, reorganized three kitchen cabinets, re-organized all the bathroom cabinets, and fully stocked the refrigerator.

Wedding planning. Here's where I ask (for the first time) for all your great ideas. Let's talk weddings and receptions. particularly if you are local and you know a great venue or caterer, please chime in!

::encouraging learning

first up in my organized world: a very systematic school week.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

When we were at Disney, our days were planned very carefully. We had a list, all written out, of what we were going to do when. We didn't follow the list. Our plans changed as circumstances dictated change. But we started with a plan and our serendipitous discoveries were all the better for having the plan from which to begin. There is going to be some carefully cultivated rhythm in this house henceforth.

::begging prayers

for my dear friend Colleen, as she meets incomprehensible grief of another child she will not hold here on earth, while going forward to embrace God's plan for her family in a foreign land. Her courage, her determination and her resolve to never, ever relinquish hope inspire me daily. Godspeed, my friend.

and for Mary Beth as she makes some difficult choices and some big changes.

::keeping house

I'm on a tear. Nothing like spending two weeks in beautiful homes and hotels to make one want to renovate the whole house;-).

::crafting in the kitchen

Mike and I went out this morning and shopped for the week. We're all stocked up and my menus are made. It was astounding how our grocery bill compared to the last two weeks' eating out bills. We won't think about that now, though. Oh, and I think I'm going to take the Green Smoothie Challenge.

::loving the moments

There were so many moments. I'm grateful for all the time we had together. It was good. Very, very good.

::living the liturgy

I'm sort of lost liturgically. It was Christmas still when we left. Michael and Kristin took down the tree while we were gone and carefully put it away. But there are still little remnants of Christmas trimmings here and there. I'm focusing anew on praying the Hours and bringing myself into the presence of the universal Church. I'm ready to sink into Ordinary time. And, oh happy day, there are enough peppermint candles left to ease the transition this week. Life smells sweet.

::planning for the week ahead

I begin with the orthodontist at 7:15 this morning. Stephen popped two bands while we were gone.Have I mentioned that my orthodontist never sleeps? I'm pretty sure he doesn't. And he's very cheerful early in the morning. From there, it's back into the full swing of learning and playing and dancing and driving. While we were in Disney World, I walked 5-10 miles a day. Most of the time, I was carrying Sarah. I feel like that was a great jumpstart to a new, more active me. I am determined to get in an hour of exercise every day.

January 09, 2012

In a place like Disney World, where the evidence of imagination and creativity is so strikingly present, it's ridiculously easy to see how we are created in the image of the Creator. God imbued in us a certain creativity. And when we use that gift to its greatest potential, it's better than "magical."

::listening to

the hum of the air conditioner in the quiet of a dark hotel building. It's been days since I've written and I've seen and heard and felt so many things that my mind is awhirl. I promised myself I'd stay away from the keyboard these two weeks, but yesterday, in the midst of a crushing crowd and more sights and sounds than I could absorb, every fiber of my being wanted at least a pencil and paper to record, and yes, probably to process, what I was seeing and hearing and feeling.

::clothing myself in

my Ergo. I almost didn't bring it. My "baby" is three; why would I bring the baby carrier? I'm so crazy glad I did. When we get to the park in the morning, Sarah is extremely clingy. She wants to wrap her arms tightly around my neck and she needs to stay there for the first couple of hours. Then, as the day goes on, she separates. At the end of the day, when she knows we're leaving, and again transitioning, she's back to her chokehold. As much as I love the feel of her arms around me, I am fairly certain the elbow doctor would frown upon me carrying her that way as we walk briskly through miles of amusement park.The Ergo makes it work beautifully. My little pocket pouch in the front is filled with bandaids and blister packs (we haven't needed them), Salponas patches, hand sanitizer, granola bars and trail mix, and my key to the Kingdom. We're good to go; she plays Roo to my Kanga for just a little while longer. I am so grateful for every minute.

Rapunzel told her that she looks just like her when she was a little girl.

::giving thanks for

my good man, who has worked very hard to make this once-in-a-lifetime vacation possible. He's been an endless font of patience and goodwill from the moment we left home and he's made this whole vacation as "magical" as it was promised to be. {And I'm grateful for the company for which he works. I'm so impressed with every little, thoughtful detail. It's good to be a part of the Disney cast.}

::pondering prayerfully

It is requisite for the relaxation of the mind that we make use, from time to time, of playful deeds and jokes.-- St. Thomas Aquinas

::turning the pages of this book

The Creative Habit. Disney World is a great place to be reading a creativity book. Lots of thoughts to ponder as I walk and walk and walk and devour the fruits of someone else's creative habits.

::thinking thoughts as I go about my daily round

I am acutely aware that my large family vacation days are numbered. Michael didn't make this trip with us. We were a party of ten for several truly beautiful days. And then, Patrick and Christian went home to start the winter term. I admit to crying behind my sunglasses as they left us in the park yesterday. It won't be the same without them. And I wonder when my heart will stop hurting so at the goodbyes. Such a lot of goodbyes. I'm guessing never.

::creating by hand

I stitched on a pillow cover all the way down here, just sweet square from Loulouthi Needleworks. I'm nearly finished now, just working a tiny bit every night before sleep. I'm glad to have found needlework this year. I'm proud of myself for choosing projects I know will take a long time. I'm deliberately slowing myself and overcoming my tendency to hurtle at prime efficient speed throughout my days. Sometimes, what appears efficient is less effective because much is lost in the hurry.

::learning lessons in

Disney. Layer upon layer, there is so much to this place. At every turn, I am amazed and inspired and truly awed. Here, there is tangible proof that something can be well-managed, beautiful, disciplined, and outrageously fun at the same time. Disney should offer mom getaways--intensive boot-camps where we can learn creative management tips and techniques Disney-style and then bring a little magic home to our households. I'm so not kidding.

::encouraging learning

There is no doubt that there is much here that is educational and we're soaking up just a small fraction of it. The real life education is abundant, too. Family vacations can bring out the best and the worst in families. The negatives are magnified, if they exist, and it doesn't take long for them to break down the fiber of the family and create discord. On the other hand, a healthy family thrives in a vacation setting and learns to appreciate the gift of happy family all the more. I'm happy to report that we are thriving.

::on blogging and recording

I'm creating memories here, giving my full time and attention to actually doing and saying and hearing and tasting and touching the memorable. I sent a desperate email to Ginny the first night we were here and confessed that I was more than a little hesitant to carry my camera into the park. I had already talked to Sarah and tried to cram a photo class into an afternoon phone call. Essentially, I knew that my pictures would never adequately capture our experiences. Ginny wrote, "enjoy Disney--and really--there is no real way to capture the magic of Disneyworld with a camera. It's a feeling." I felt like I'd received dispensation. If she says it can't be done, then it can't be done. I resolved instead to focus on details and to try to capture some of the things that made me stop and wonder at the wonder of it all. I am creating memories here, but there's a good chance I'm not ever going to adequately record them.

::carefully cultivating rhythm

Our days have a rhythm of sorts and Mike and I are very conscious of the need to balance the quiet and restful with the noisy and exciting. We are staying in a villa with a kitchen (and a laundry closet, thank goodness). We are able to retreat in a place of utter beauty. Yes, Virginia, I have used my camera to snap pictures of home design ideas here in the hotel. I love it here. If my big boys were here, it would be perfect. And maybe my sewing machine, too. I miss my sewing machine.

::begging prayers

for peace, patience, and safety. And now, especially, for those big kids. It's hard to be this far away from them as their semester begins.

January 06, 2012

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. Photo capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, visit Soulemama to leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.

Usually, Friday is for {this moment}. This Friday, though, the moment is in my memory and my words will have to capture the image.

Mary Beth and I made a considered decision not to bring the camera on our first day at Disney. We both wanted to live in the moment and not to look at the day through the lens. I'm mostly glad we decided to do it that way--we were giving all our managements systems their first tests and the camera was one fewer thing to consider. There is one moment though that is an image I do want to keep forever.

All day, Patrick was making me (and everyone else) a little nuts. Every kid has his or her own way of absorbing the sensory stimulation of Disney. Even though it's all good, it's still stressful. Patrick processes through his feet. It's the weirdest thing. A little bit of elbow action, but mostly feet--kicking things, jostling, navigating through space as if he were on a soccer field. For the most part, it was Nicky who paid the price. Every time, I turned around, Paddy was tripping, bumping, or otherwise jostling Nicky. I tend to be overprotective of Nicky--he's in a tough spot because he's the youngest of five super-competitive boys. And I try mostly unsuccessfully to mitigate the big brother teasing. Frankly, I was really ready to wring Patrick's neck.

At the end of the day, all the kids were gathered at a railing overlooking the lake watching the light show at Epcot. I walked up between Patrick and Mary Beth and told Patrick that at the end of the show I wanted him to take Karoline firmly by the hand. Mary Beth was assigned Katie. Mike would carry Sarah. It was really dark and I wanted to impress upon Paddy the seriousness of his assignment. I told him that more children are lost in the dark after the Epcot light show that anywhere else at any other time. His ears perked up. "Where'd you hear that?" he asked

When the show ended, the plan abruptly changed. Christian scooped Sarah up onto his shoulders. Mary Beth plopped Karoline in the stroller and buckled her in. And Patrick knocked up against Nicholas and locked his arms firmly around his shoulders. Then, he gathered Stephen into himself with his other arm. He held them tightly against his body the whole long walk to the parking tram. There is no doubt that under the guise of a headlock, he was all big brother. I walked behind them all the way and soaked up the sight of his strong, protective arms, wishing I could capture the image.

October 18, 2011

I'm kind of hanging on to this Walt Disney quote these days, rolling it around in my head, making a motto of it. Our family is planning a big trip south after New Year's and I'm in the early planning stages, thinking hard about the wide age span and the mixed genders and the vast resources for fabulous fun. I'm beginning to sketch out how we will use our time. We'll stay at a Disney hotel (it's an ESPN thing~my husband works for Mickey Mouse). Right now, I'm very much enjoying Dawn's Disney blog, because I know Dawn and if anyone can approach Disney in an organized efficient manner, it's Dawn. I'm so grateful she went recently. I'm learning at the feet of a master.

I'm very much in the information-gathering stage. Have you been to Disney World? Traveled a long distance with nearly a nearly a dozen people? What are your best tips and tricks? Books? Resources? I'm all {mouse} ears:-).

Oh, and to give you full appreciation of what Disney is for little girls, you've got to watch this one all the way to the end. I smiled until I cried.

Search

Why?

...that their hearts may be encouraged as they are knit together in love, to have all the riches of assured understanding and the knowledge of God's mystery, of Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures or wisdom and knowledge. ~Col 2:2

FULL DISCLOSURE

If you click through an Amazon link on this blog and subsequently make a purchase, I will receive a small credit from Amazon. I will be very grateful for this credit and will use it purchase still more books and such to share with you. An eternal circle of Amazon life, you might say:-)