a man said:

What an awful thing for your intern to say to a patient. Finding fidelity a challenge is not at all an uncommon experience–though I suppose I don’t talk to as many people about it as a professional would. But I feel it in my own life and hear about it on occasion from friends who for whatever reason feel comfortable opening up to me about an uncomfortable aspect of their personal life. For me and from the stories I’ve heard, the challenge has come from a basically unsatisfying sex life. And since I’m not comfortable sharing that with most of my friends, I’d assume other friends, in addition to the ones I’ve heard from also have this problem and chose not to say anything about it.

In my own life, there have certainly been magic pussies. Though I think that is a complete misnomer. There was nothing magic about the pussy, it’s all in the head. Her head. She was turned on by me, showed sincere desire for me, and had a strong appetite for sex and variety in sex. Nothing magical, but a powerful draw for me and I suspect most men as well. Some girlfriends had one, some did not. My wife had a magic pussy when I met her. Who knows where she’s keeping it these days?

I’m certainly looking for it. I’m trying to meet her needs. It’s uncomfortable to admit that I’m not adequately meeting her emotional needs. But I can hear her, accept what she’s saying, that it’s important to her and try. And try again. I don’t get much sympathy, however, with respect to my sexual needs. Not from her, when she tells me to “suck it up and deal”, or that “I don’t really think it’s that bad for you.” Or from our therapist who says, “Sounds like some self-pity there.”

I think it’s a common mistake on this site (and in real life) to write off men’s sexual needs and to tell them what they need is … for lack of a better term, “magic intimacy.”

” It’s uncomfortable to admit that I’m not adequately meeting her emotional needs. But I can hear her, accept what she’s saying, that it’s important to her and try. I don’t get much sympathy, however, with respect to my sexual needs. Not from her, when she tells me to “suck it up and deal”, or that “I don’t really think it’s that bad for you.” Or from our therapist who says, “Sounds like some self-pity there.” ” When a man has committed himself to learning his woman’s needs and consistently works to meet them, he earns the right to not… Read more »

I wouldn’t know what to think if I had read this article before reading the one I’m sharing here. I came across it on facebook and have been very happy I did because it gives me access to a very deep empathy for all men. I hope this information is spread wide and far and that it eventually changes the way we treat boys in this world. Very thought provoking article. Thanks.http://www.interchangecounseling.com/blog/why-men-are-so-obsessed-with-sex/