Helen describes her state of mind in close detail. On the very first page she says, "I felt odd: overtired, overwrought, unpleasantly like my brain had been removed and my skull stuffed with something like microwaved aluminium foil, dinted, charred and shorting with sparks." Where did her expression of feelings resonate with you?

Posted Apr. 06, 2016
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bethb

Join Date: 04/08/13

Posts: 20

RE: Where did Helen's expression of feelings resonate with you?

In grief, one seems alone even when others attempt to help. Helen's inability to seek help or her sparse pool of friends and family, caused her to feel even more isolated and helpless. Her coping skills, or lack of, made me feel increasingly more thankful for the circle of family and friends who loved and distracted me from days that seemed impossibly long. I wish she could have had that to rely on, rather than plodding along and withdrawing even further than those who might have helped.

Posted Apr. 09, 2016
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KateB

Join Date: 02/11/16

Posts: 56

Expert

RE: Where did Helen's expression of feelings resonate with you?

I think I shared the same reaction that I am glad that my experience of grieving for my Dad was not like Helen's. Like bethb, the book made me feel thankful for the closeness of my family. But all through the book there are phrases that really resonated for me and perhaps Helen's extreme grieving process is what allowed her to find the words for things we all feel, but don't have the words for. For example:

"I feel hollow and unhoused, an airy, empty wasps' nest, a thing made of chewed paper after the frosts have murdered the life within." p130

"There is a time in life when you expect the world to be always full of new things. And then comes a day when you realise that is not how it will be at all. You see that life will become a thing full of holes. Absenses. Losses. Things that were there and are no longer. And you realise, too, that you have to grow around and between the gaps, though you can put your hand out to where things were and feel that tense, shining dullness of the space where the memories are." p171

Posted Apr. 13, 2016
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marganna

Join Date: 10/14/11

Posts: 111

Expert

RE: Where did Helen's expression of feelings resonate with you?

From the very 1st page I knew this was going to be a deep & expressive book. Her entire journey resonated with me. Beautifully written, beautifully expressed, well done throughout!