Mayday! Mayday! We have a witness…and video. The National Enquirer has video of an interview with male escort, 32 year old Joey Anderson, who claims to have done the deed with one Mr. Joe Simpson, father to Jessica and Ashley Simpson.

Joey claims to have had a steamy sex session with Papa Simpson at the famed Mandarin Oriental hotel in New York. His interview goes into great detail about Papa Simpson’s penchant for ass play and love of making out like a teenager.

“I went to the front desk, they called him up and then I got a room key to go up. He used the name Jack Simpson (but) I recognized him from the get-go. We made our way to the bed, took our clothes off and I started with a massage. We started with his underwear on, and then when I was giving him his massage eventually they came off. He enjoyed kissing very much. Lots of body contact, I was on top of him, he was on top of me. We rolled around. I want to say he had some experience before. I couldn’t have been the first one, because he got very into it,” says Joey. “He didn’t seem nervous at all and he wasn’t drunk. He was aroused. I gave him oral, he gave me oral.”

I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume that the man-whore knows his stuff and could detect a newbie from a mile away. Clearly Joe Simpson is no virgin when it comes to guy on guy action. Come on out of the proverbial closet already and join the homosexual party. The story has already been told. Witnesses have already come forward. What more are you waiting for; pictures and video of you in the act? I’m all for coming out when you are ready, but come on man…you’ve already been pushed and locked out. Accept it, come to terms with it, whatever you gotta do, just do it already so that you can stop lying to the world and more importantly yourself.