03/27 More Wifestyles, Part 3

It means a lot. Also, you do bring up a great point about what our kids will be like as grown ups. i struggle with this a lot and it's good to know I'm not the only one who does. My husband says I'm crazy for worrying so much but with all that's out there how can I not? I look back at all the things I didn't learn/know when I left home and how scary that was. Oh well, I just know I'm grateful for living in a free country where as a woman I have a choice on how to raise kids. I can't say that MY way is the ONLY way or even the BEST way...not sure about those who do. I know, for me and mine, it has worked. There have been struggles but I have happy, smart kids who love me and I love them! There is no "disconnect" in my world! There are no "holes" in my family. My husband and I both are very involved. We do not live extravagantly (as is the belief) but we do have what we need and then some. Thanks again for the apology...it does mean a lot!

"My husband says I'm crazy for worrying so much..."

If your husband is saying you have mental health problems maybe you should listen to him?

"We do not live extravagantly (as is the belief)"

Who has this belief? I don't. I take your word on your finances. Do you understand that when someone says something about themselves it does not mean they are implying the opposite about you? It's not always about your Kira.

03/27 More Wifestyles, Part 3

We have been keeping busy and I must admit, I am glad to be staying home this week. This morning was nice, we got up, ate breakfast together and the girls and I worked on academics and been hanging out, they are watching a show now, I am gonna go get the kitchen cleaned up and we will be going outside to play.

Have great day and that goes for every one else as well.

We are good. I actually start therapy tomorrow, to deal with some of my issues of abuse as a child...I think it will be very good. I am very excited to deal with these issues.

Emma and I went outside and played ring around the rosy (sp) in the shade, it was nice, a nice cool breeze. Then we came in had lunch and now she is napping.

03/27 More Wifestyles, Part 3

We have been keeping busy and I must admit, I am glad to be staying home this week. This morning was nice, we got up, ate breakfast together and the girls and I worked on academics and been hanging out, they are watching a show now, I am gonna go get the kitchen cleaned up and we will be going outside to play.

Have great day and that goes for every one else as well.

We are good. I actually start therapy tomorrow, to deal with some of
my issues of abuse as a child...I think it will be very good. I am very
excited to deal with these issues.

Emma and I went outside and played ring around the rosy (sp) in the
shade, it was nice, a nice cool breeze. Then we came in had lunch and
now she is napping.

07/28 When Sexual Styles Don't Match

Well, I read your reply. I do appreciate you taking time to comment. No, I do not have evidence for everything I said - but I do have some experience.

Do you have an evidence of this?

I do know that kids who are left alone much of the afternoon and early evening every day have the potential to go out and do what they want and sneak back home before their parent(s) gets home. I saw kids my own age doing that during my teen years. It did increase in my own observations. I myself, went down hill when I entered a sexual relationship at 22 and wasn't married. I was still living at home and put things over on my mom all the time. Fortunately I didn't become pregnant and broke it off in 4 years. (During that time I got full-time employment, moved out and supported myself in an apartment.) But I went downhill during it! I stopped taking care of myself, became anorexic, and nearly got into serious trouble. At least I had money and my own place. Most teens of today do NOT have money or the resources to take care of themselves - let alone a baby. And why should parents have to spend their golden years constantly providing financial support plus room & board to adult children (or children who behave like adults sexually) who don't think before they leap? I also agree with hitechgirl that teens are not emotionally or fiscally ready to deal with the results of their having sexual unions.

If someone PLANS to parent a child alone that doesn't cause problems.

OK, sometimes a person decides to raise a child alone, and that is their choice to be sure. But in some cases, a person enters a relationship trusting and counting upon their spouse or mate to support them when a child does come along. I don't need evidence to see the news and people talking on shows everyday - distraught that they were left alone with young children and no help (that they counted on). What's wrong with people counting on each other to see things through? Emotions are going to come up in that area of trusting and loving. I just don't see how you can dismiss it. It's not a crime to love someone enough to desire a life-long commitment from him/her. I think people need to be VERY careful not to become vulnerable if they cannot take it when they are deserted.

Wrong, life can only be created by a male sperm and a female egg. The sex act is not required, love is not required between a man and a woman.

Hmm. The male sperm is only in men and female eggs are only in women - do we agree or have I got that backwards? Can you clarify what else other than artificial insemination can produce children other than classic hetero-sex?

Our bodies were not "designed" in my opinion. And there is plenty of evidence to back that opinion up. . . .On a side note, why did god design our sex organs to be so closely related and near where we eliminate waste? Not very a intelligent design.)

Ahh, but my life is a testimony that sticking to traditional sex style and a monogomous relationship has perserved my sexual health and protected me from STDs. I am STD-free and have been free from the worry that goes along with it.

If someone PLANS to parent a child alone that doesn't cause problems. And once again, marriage doesn't protect people from having broken homes, abuse or neglect. Married people haven't cornered the market on happiness.

Of course, not. Marriage is a commitment and this requires hard work and dedication.

Giving birth each time changed me physically and psychologically. I really cannot help that - except to try and cope. Without my husband of 22 years, I most likely would have fallen apart. Of course, I would have coped just like every other person in such a position. But not every person has the family or financial support necessary to get through that.

I will be re-reading your comments in case I misquoted or missed something. I really do appreciate having something to do like talk about this. You make a very good point about sex-education and teaching about condoms. But the moral issues and divine creation/design - we'll never agree on.

"Hmm. The male sperm is only in men and female eggs are only in women - do we agree or have I got that backwards? Can you clarify what else other than artificial insemination can produce children other than classic hetero-sex?"

Any egg and any sperm can be mix and put into any womb. Your previous comment: "When children are brought into the world, they need a strong support
and care system. Marriage is designed to provide this. Of course you
and I will disagree on what constitutes a marriage nowadays. Life can
be created only between man and woman. " This made it sound like the fact that men and women can have sex and produce children makes their relationship unique there for the only correct one. People can get pregnant with out having sex. So the "having children" argument against gay marriage or nontraditional relationships is out.

"Ahh, but my life is a testimony that sticking to traditional sex style
and a monogomous relationship has perserved my sexual health and
protected me from STDs. I am STD-free and have been free from the
worry that goes along with it."

Your life is an anecdote, it's not evidence. There is nothing inherently wrong with non traditional sex lives. I know a woman who used to post on this board, she has an open marriage. She and her husband are very happy and very healthy. Another anecdote.

08/24 The Family Cult

I do not understand how any parent could put their children in this position, and just allow this to happen. I guess I am just too naive. The natural reaction of a parent would be to protect their children. Not This.

May god help them see this

Navy-mom

Very weak minded people end up in cults. (This does not make them "bad"...so please don't attack me, not everyone is perfect and a weak mind is just an imprefection that some people have and some people prey upon that.) They do not have good reasoning skills or a skeptical mind. OR they were raised in one and they have a warped idea of reality.

08/16 The Hunt for Amanda

What "research" are you talking about? Please provide links to studies, academic journals, textbooks and so on.

While you're on it, also compare the percentages of runaways from healthy families and abusive ones.

As for her family's behavior, physically grabbing Amanda in order to take away her cell phone, forcing your way into the shower screaming is insane. And remember this was on camera, I would bet they act far crazier when no one is watching.

Amanda is not her parents' property, if she wants to live elsewhere it should be her right to do so.

You've lost me now...I didn't say anything about research. I said something about your childish line of thinking NOT being supported by research...Read my post closer.

Amanda is just a spoiled little brat who needs to get a wake up call...there are kids out there with out food to eat, kids who have AIDS...kids who are dying. She needs to get real and frankly so do you.

08/22 Unforgettable Weight Stories

I understand how the girls feel when they are so overweight. I am at the most I have ever been and I hate myself. I have trouble putting my shoes on and tying them. I am tired just doing everday things.

I feel I am in a catch 22 as I have doctor's orders not to be on my feet any more than absolutely necessary due to a major foot reconstrutive surgery April of 2005 and the bones are not healing where the 2 major pins are. I feeel as I sit that the weight is just falling on.

I have sat at this computer for hours in the middle of the night and looked out at the dark streets wondering if I should just get in the car and drive until I can't go any more. Then I realize what it would do to my family and to our grandson that is living with us.

I hate myself and do not look in the mirror anymore than I have to. I feel as if everyone is looking at me and saying how fat and ugly I am. My friend and I used to say that if we got to looking like a certain person or figure to promise to shoot each other and I wish she would. I don't have hope except in the Lord. I pray he will help me when I get this foot taken care of.

I want to be able to get on the floor and play with my grandkids and great grandkids. I can't even baby sit with them as I can't keep up with the little ones that are walking now.

Have you watching what you eat? Losing weight is like 80% diet, at least for me it is. Don't get me wrong, exercise is great, it's SO important, but for you, maybe you should focus on diet for now.

Could you get some dumbells and exercise your upper body? Do some butterfly moves, some curls. It's better than nothing.