Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Destination: Baby

I'm in Maine.

As you might expect from my household, preparations for the trip east combined the tender drama of "Grey's Anatomy" with the spectacle of Cirque du Soleil.

Dolores spent much of our final day in Chicago on the telephone, trying to make nice with Barbara Bush, who was extremely put-out that we would not be flitting up to Kennebunkport during our stay. According to Dolores, she and Mrs. Bush crossed sticks during a field hockey tournament at Wellesley years ago and have kept in touch ever since.

"I remember junior when he was only this high," said Dolores. "I used to throw a blanket over his head and we'd watch him try to find his way out. Took him about three hours on a good day. Bar says now he can do it in under two if Condoleeza Rice stands nearby and shakes a bag full of Jolly Ranchers."

Harry, who couldn't join us because of an improvisation class at The Second City, presented me with a sampler for Abigail's room done in quite accomplished cross stitch. Over a picture of a bunny rabbit in an onion patch he'd worked the alphabet and a verse:

LIFE IS LIKE AN ONION.YOU PEEL AWAYLAYER AFTER LAYERUNTIL YOU HAVENOTHING IN YOUR HANDSAND TEARS IN YOUR EYES.

"I believe in telling kids the truth," said Harry. "Plus I thought the little bunny was totally cute."

"It's...crying," I said, peering closely.

"Life is suffering," said Harry.

I couldn't argue with that.

Mrs Teitelbaum came over and contributed a small but heavy package wrapped up in pink paper with little green kittens all over it and a tag that read FOR BABY FROM MRS T AND TINKLES.

"Do I need to worry about putting this through the security X-ray?" I asked, giving it a delicate shake.

"I don't think so," said Mrs Teitelbaum. "It's tomato paste. The nice government man on the phone said it's okay."

"Tomato paste?"

"I'm always running out," she explained. "But I can go to the grocery and get more. A baby can't do that. So I got ten cans. That should last a while."

"Indeed."

"I hope nobody else has already given her some. I know you have Italian relatives and whatnot."

"I believe they're all giving pasta and sardines," I said.

"Oh, well then," she said brightly, "I'm so glad I went with my second idea instead."

With all the baby gifts there was barely room enough in the suitcases for clothing. I had to resort to the usual subterfuge of locking and hiding my bags to keep Dolores from secretly substituting three extra hats and a kimono for my underwear and socks.

Meeting Abigail

She was sleeping when we got to the house, but shortly after she roused herself enough to hang out. They handed her to over to me, took a couple of photos, and then wandered off, leaving us alone together.

I have precious little experience of infants but remembered that they like being sung to. I opened my mouth and realized that suddenly the only song I could remember was Bessie Smith's Gimme a Pigfoot.

Oh, what the hell.

By the time I got to They all congregates at an all-night strut, Abigail was gurgling and bouncing and we carried on nicely all by ourselves through two verses and a go-for-it encore.

On the whole, very promising. Tonight I'm going to see how she feels about Stephen Sondheim.

Looks like she has good taste already. Great first song from the "Unc". My boys loved the one my Pop sang to them, roughly translated from Ukrainian "The Whore goes to Heaven". All about her adventurs.For a guy with no experience, you are cuddling her just right.BarbB.

You sentimental soul. Keep singing it and we'll have grounds to hope she holds forth at Show and Tell some day. I can see the ripples spreading -- "Elmo Sings Ma Rainey." "Wee Sing Fats Waller Around the Campfire."

Dammit - and I'd happily decided that 2 kids, a healthy one of each, was plenty, and that I'm enjoying having small children who can have intelligent conversations with me, and I'm soooooooo glad that the baby days (or rather the baby sleepless nights) are behind me - and then I see a picture like that one, and all of a sudden I feel like perhaps I do need another one...

She's Adorable!!! If you ever blank out on a song to sing, just sing Can't help falling in love with you by elvis. Just the chorus will work. That's what I do when I have a lulaby brain fart.:-)"As the river flows, gently to the seadarlin so it goessome things were meant to beTake my hand, Take my whole life tooI can't help falling in love with you."You can do the UB40 version too but you may be tempted to start singing "red red wine".

Franklin, She is amazing. Babies are so perfect in every way. Of course I had a friend who said he didnt like them much because they leak at both ends. Go figure. You make a great uncle. And I can see how she will have many adventures with Uncle Franklin.

Before I wound up in New York, I lived in southern Maine for a number of years, working as a reporter for the Portland Press Herald. I also met junior, although he was a bit taller than Dolores remembers, and I recall him as rather smug and snotty. Sort of like he is now.

Oh what a beautiful beautiful baby. Non traditional songs are the best. In college I had to explain to a teacher (of childrens literature) that I grew up reciting "The Raven" and therefore, regardless of what she said, "The Raven" was my favorite childrens poem (she said my family is odd)

it is the beginning of a life long love, devotion and hopefully a lot of happiness and fun. you have no idea how happy i have been with my nephews and nieces and now my great nephews and niece. it is such a privilege and happiness. i totally understand your bliss and it just gets better!!!!

Since you clearly know that she's adorable, I won't waste bandwidth telling you.Do leave some yarn in Maine for me though, I'll be heading there at the end of the month and don't really want to discover that you've beaten me to my favorite shops. (Have you been to Halcyon yet this trip?)

When my cousin's baby was fussing and only singing kept him calm, I drew a singing blank. The only thing I could think of all the words to was the national anthems, US and Canadian (in English and French). (I'm a hockey fan!) He didn't seem to mind.

Sounds like you're well on your way to being the Fabulous Gay Uncle we all wish we had. Congratulations — to you, to your family, and to Abigail herself for having the luck to be born into such a loving family.

My kids loved any Broadway songs when they were babies. Their favorites to get to sleep, though, were the hymns from church (Greek Orthodox in Greek of all things). Maybe chanting while rocking? I'd bet it would work.

The lull-a-bye from "Apple Tree".Close your eyes, whatever you are.Lay your head on my breast.Doesn't faze me, what you turn out to be,Pony or poodle or sheep.You're my own whatever you are.Sleep, sleep, sleep.

Can't really go wrong with Cole Porter: Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered, Do I Love You, True Love, From This Moment OnWell, maybe not Miss Otis Regrets or Too Darn Hot just yet. It doesn't get any better than that picture. And how great that your sister and brother-in-law are willing to share! Sue F.

Oh man, I love that song. And I can reassure you that not one of my three, count 'em three nieces (I am such a lucky woman) has seemed to suffer any ill effects from me singing them highly similar fare.

I think the 'Awwww' says it all about the baby picture. So precious. One thing my son liked when he was tiny until he was too cool for me (thank heaven that passed) was Poe's poem about bells. The only thing I can remember is a line that went "the tintinabulation of the bells bells bells" or something similar. Something about the weird rythm of the poem made him so happy.

Of course she's going to love Sondheim. What girl could resist a sensitively-wrought rendition of "Pretty Women"? Although if you are willing to branch out, I recommend "I'll Never Say No" from The Unsinkable Molly Brown.

You know how people say that all babies are beautiful? I believe there is truth in that, but when I say your neice is a beautiful baby, I mean it in wee bitty supermodel way, or actually more refined than those paper eaters... in a John Singer Sargent way, in his beautiful painting of the sisters.

baby feet/toes- the most beautiful thing in the world----well- cept for maybe baby hands/fingers...

Couldn't help but notice the likeness between you--- especially around the very high foreheads;)

hmmm my husband decided to sing the theme to "Gilligan's Island" to our third son...it became "their song" (He was a surprise- 12 years after our middle son, apparently he'd run out of sweet baby songs!

I understand that your experience with newborns is limited; mine, on the other hand, is not and I am telling you Abigail is very, very pretty. Not all babies are.And holding and singing is very good. At this age, you can sing about "The Whore Goes to Heaven" (see barb b said's comment)she will not remember. Enjoy, she will grow very fast. vj

She is a beautiful baby, to be sure, but seeing the picture of you holding her stimulated rather more carnal impulses. Am I the ONLY one who was thinking "Damn, Franklin looks so f*c&ing HOT holding that baby!"??

Yes I'm a mommy, with 3 of my own, so I am not immune to the allure of a sweet smelling little potato...which reminds me of the little song my ex used to sing to our firstborn... something like

You're my little potatoYou're my little potatoI dug you upYou come from underground... he sang this while doing his tall white-boy dance that looked like he was doing knee bends.

What a precious and beautiful bundle of joy. I love her name. Enjoy being an uncle. How young is too young to learn how to knit? The only bad thing about all the darling pics of her is that it makes me want another baby! Oh no!

What a beautiful pic of you and Abigail. You look like a natural. And Abigail will love anything you sing, just as long as you sing. Babies are wonderful that way. My girls always loved Oh my darlin', Clementine. And that's not really kiddish material with the drowning and what not.

My experience with babies is that they like Frank Sinatra and Ella Fitzgerald. Which may be why, when the Christmas pageant at school had the kiddos singing Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, my child somewhat scandalized the assembled by launching into an impersonation of Dean Martin.

Oh how wonderful, Uncle Franklin! And yeah, at this point, so long as you sing it in the right tone, they don't care. I was once babysitting my cousin's child and I wound up just saying anything that came into my to the tune of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. It worked.

Babies love singing. It doesn't matter what it is as long as it doesn't hurt they're ears they love it.

Eventually they become critics though. ;)

The first song I sang to my son was.. Every Rose Has It's Thorn by Poison. Seriously. It was the only thing I could think of after 17+ hours of labour and many drugs at 3 in the morning on Christmas. I just sang the first verse and chorus over and over again to him until I finally fell asleep myself.

He loves the song still, and if he's crying and I sing it helps to quiet him, so what can I say?

Just steer away from Barney (Hate, hate hate - kids love love love) , and any of his little ditties. Baby is gorgeous, (so broody), enjoy, soon you'll be throwing her up in the air , causing the parents much anxiety! PS. He-man is straight speak for SLOB!

It's me again, Lauren, the one who begged you for the Glencora Baby Shawl pattern. I'm in huge baby love right now, wanting to make things for children unrealized as well as children impovershed. I just wanted to let you know I love what you do and I found a great christening shawl pattern in "Folk Shawls," which shows an elderly Irish woman holding a wee bairn in a lovely shawl designed for that purpose. Although I raise Shetlands, I bought a Merino fleece and am carding it in preparation for the shawl I will make (hopefully). I plan on dyeing it pale yellow with the natural cream as a border and you are my inspiration so thank you very much. I just wanted to let you know how awesome you are, Franklin.

Copyright and Posting Notice

All original content of this blog, both words and images, is held in copyright by F. Habit. Use of any kind, in any medium, for any reason without express, prior written consent is prohibited.

Permission is not granted for the posting of any content from this site to Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, or any other Web site.

Please do not provide links to any product, service, organization or cause when leaving comments unless directly related to the topic of the post. Unsolicited advertising will be deleted and repeat offenders will be blocked.

When in doubt, please ask. I'm not mean, I'm just committed to preserving the quality of experience for my readers.