יום ראשון, 28 באפריל 2013

Do you think that prescribing your child
Ritalin will make everything work out?

If the answer is yes, you are sadly, sorely mistaken.

Yes, medical treatments can answer
problems created by a neurological chemical imbalance that is present in
children with ADD/ADHD. But the behaviors that they exhibit are also largely
connected to the interactions that they have started experiencing between their
parents and themselves, and the types of attention they are garnering.

"We tried everything: eventually, we
took our son for testing, and the final diagnosis was that our son is suffering
from ADD. So we started him on medication, but besides for his teacher's
reports that there is a slight improvement in his performance at school, at
home we have seen no change at all".

These were the first words I heard from
Neta and Dvir, a wonderful couple. Loving parents, who are engaging in the
battle against their son's ADD, and feel that they are losing. "His
behavior is intolerable. The outbursts, the constant refusals... We don't know
what to do".

Unfortunately, they are not the only
parents to experience this problem.

Don't Despair

When a child is diagnosed with ADD/ADHD,
and the disorder makes it difficult for you, and others, to cope with his/her
negative behavior, it is essential that the child receives behavioral treatmentalong with medical treatment.

Often, the medication corrects the
chemical imbalance that is affecting the child - that is, it answers the
neurological issue - but does not 'fix' the daily interactions between a parent
and child.

Of course, it is likely that the child's
difficult behavior began with this chemical imbalance. But, it is strengthened
and bolstered through everyday interactions, over time.

For example: If parents respond with
giving in to, or bargaining with a child who is being immensely
uncooperative, the child is not likely
to change. Rather, this simply serves to reinforce his/her contrary behavior.

This is due to the fact that the child
begins to subconsciously understand that that being stubborn, explosive or
rude, often results in getting his/her own way.

Further, responding to negative behavior
with coaxing, explanations and/or bartering, may get parents some short term
peace and quiet, but in the long run, it does not decrease behavioral
difficulties. On the contrary, things usually start to deteriorate more.

If the situation is indeed worsening,
this is an indication that the child is somewhat 'enjoying' the attention - and thus has no need to
change any behaviors. (And yes, reprimands constitute attention. Negative attention
is still attention.)

No Miracle Cures

This is where behavioral treatment comes
in.

This form of therapy assesses the
function, or power, of adverse behavior during the daily communication between
a parent and child.

In simpler terms, it assesses 'what
causes my child to behave the way he/she is behaving, and what is he/she
gaining by behaving in this way?'.

Once the reasons behind the child's
behavior have been brought to light, it is possible to adjust the details of
behavioral therapy to suit the specific issues that each family is dealing
with.

With regard to ADD/ADHD, behavioral
therapy looks at the entire day as a whole, as well as all the individual daily
occurrences within the family unit.

This is an essential aspect of this
therapy because human behavior can not
be accurately assessed through analyzing separate instances that occur during a
day. Rather, it is only through all of those instances as a whole that an
authentic picture can emerge. That is, each interaction that takes place
affects the one after it, and all subsequent interactions.

After the 'behavioral process' that we
experienced together, Neta and Dvir understand that Ritalin is not a panacea
that will remedy any and all behavioral crises.

In order to help a child combat the
symptoms of ADD/ADHD, a fundamental change needs to occur within parents, as
well as in their methods of parenting. Although these changes require massive
effort, the astonishing results they yield are well worth the effort. Parenting
in the way that your child needs you to ultimately helps the family, as a
whole, adopt a more enjoyable, relaxing life.