Ron Paul To Break Dance, Lock Onto The Daily Show 6/4

Arlington, VA (FP) Ron Paul insists that he is no Kool Herc, but said he sure will try and "Rockit" onto the set of The Daily Show this coming June 4th.

Paul was seen stretching and pumping himself up listening to "Rockit" by Herbie Hancock in preparation for his visit to The Daily Show. "It was kind of a shame to see this form of musical expression lost in the 'Gangsta Rap' error of the late 80's, early 90's." Ron expressed during our pre-interview chat.

Paul then excused himself for a moment and began to practice the 'Stomp the cockroach' locking dance style move. He started by kicking one leg into the air directly in front of him and then went down to one knee and with his other leg pointing out to the side, he began spinning and pounding the floor around him. It was simply amazing to watch, given his age.

"You know if I am elected, I am going to try and encourage our youth to re-investigate this form of dance. I find that it's not only a simple form of exercise, but a beautiful form of expression" he mused while practicing another amazing move called 'Applejax', where he kicked one leg forward from a crouching position while his upper body was lent backwards supported by both of his hands.

"You must be as flexible as a gymnast. How do you do it?" I asked of the Congressman. "I spend a lot of time watching other politicians dancing in the House," Paul said, referring to Congress.

"Dancing to or for what?" Asked another reporter.

"Oh, you know, the real issues" he answered. "I see the majority of politicians dancing a majority of the time, and frankly I need to let loose when I am not in that marshmallow pit known as Congress." he continued.

Paul concluded the interview by exiting doing the 'Scootbot' by skipping while making the motion of an exaggerated step to the left and right.

Lone Star

Make Lone Star's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

Australia- It is an "Advanced Church" facility, one of five in the world that trains the senior ministers for the churches in the rest of Australia, Japan, New Zealand and Taiwan.
The 3.5ha of land in West Chatswood cost the church $37million and...

Washington DC - Calling his cock a "massive pressure valve," former President Bill Clinton said that his sexual escapades with teenage Latin American prostitutes will "continue unabated" because they are his "only source of psychological release."...

London, UK - A highly decorated World War III general and former UK Chief of Stuff has been quizzed by cops following a series of dawn raids as part of Operation Ratsarse.
General Sir Monty Dambusta, WC & bar, 47,942,716th in line to the Briti...

Chicago - Gay groups allowed to participate in Chicago's Saint Patrick's Day Parade held a press conference to celebrate the parade organizers "openness to homosexuality" but told reporters not to confuse "being gay' with "liking the English."
"T...

WASHINGTON -- Republican leaders are engaging in a bit of their own "March Madness" in criticizing President Obama for picking the number one ranked and undefeated Kentucky Wildcats to win the NCAA men's basketball championship instead of GOP favorit...

New York - A cartoon of New York Mayor Bill de Blasio sporting demonic canine eyes has appeared on the Ecuadorian president's website marking the country's National Pet Appreciation Day.
De Blasio, 69, is portrayed as a demented Scottish Terrier l...

WASHINGTON, DC - The Justice Department is preparing to bring a lawsuit against polar bear conservationists Polar Bear Lovers over a pattern of racially discriminatory tactics.
Attorney General Eric Holder said this week he expects to announce the...