There seems to be rumors flying around about Australia being a dangerous place. Well, in my opinion you are all................well informed (read: pansies).

Here is a compilation of many of the things that WILL KILL YOU if you visit Australia and haven't undertaken a years intensive training on the proper wrestling techniques used to disable the many wild animals that will try and steal your wallet during your holiday.....

While its certainly not the most dangerous spider in Australia. It is one of the most common. Unless you keep yourself protected, you are certain to find these little guys in plans, posts, beams, fences etc. around the home. (They are like the next door neighbours that everyone loves to hate!)

Like most dangerous creatures. Leave them alone, and they won't hurt you. They won't kill an adult, but will make you violently ill, and a visit to your local emergency ward will be required. They will kill a small child.

Not as common as the old Redback, but certainly packs a killer bite. Again, don't annoy it, and it shouldn't hurt you. In saying that. Don't stick around to test this theory. They are known to run towards people not annoying it. And you Kiwi's thought none of your neighbours had Tarantulas.

The King Brown snake is not a snake to be messed with. You've seen people on TV play with snakes, and tell you what to do if you see one. Well, you don't move. This snake will kill you within 20 minutes of a bite. Don't touch, don't annoy, just don't. Although the name suggests otherwise, this is actually in the black snake family (Taipan), and most deaths are caused as people are given the wrong ant-venom.

His little friend the Brown Snake also plays in Australia. Getting bitten by one of them, depending on size, will also kill you. A big one will also kill an adult within 20 minutes of injection.

The Taipan is Australia's most poisonous snake. If bitten, in the short time you still have to live, say goodbye to the people around you, because you will die. There is anti-venom, however, the needle would need to be in your arm as you recieved the dose of venom, and you may still not live.

A large one, will kill you within 5 - 10 minutes of the bite. Not as common as the King Brown and Brown, there are still plenty around.

The Death Adder may not kill you right away, but if you are receive a bite, head straight to hospital. It will slowly (within 12 hours) kill you. Not all that many around, certainly not as many as the above two, but still here. Don't **** them off.

Like most of our snakes, don't annoy this one. There is no anti-venom, so if you do come across one, you are probably lucky that they arn't very tough. They don't like to fight, but if they do, you could die. Certainly not as dangerous as some others, but can certainly cause you to get really, really messed up.

This is really the least dangerous of our dangerous snakes. A bite can certainly kill, but generally these guys are just too stupid to care. They don't like fighting, bit they can. Like the above, just don't annoy it. It doesn't have its own anti-venom, but it can be treated with another.

A big one of these guys will have you dead in 30 minutes. Yep, they aren't to be messed with . Like the above two, they would rather run off because they are wimps, but if needed, a bite from one of these will make sure you never annoy another snake again in the rest of your life. All 30 minutes of it.

This cute, cuddly, furry little guy is all nice and harmless, just siting in the tree. Almost cute enough to go and pat. While thats all fine, you may have posed for a photo holding one at one of our many zoo's. But in the wild, don't mess with the Koala.

It hasn't happened for a long time, as most people are very well educated before coming to Australia, however, the claws on these little buggers are huge. They will shred the hell our of anything that annoys it. So just don't. They won't kill you, but they have the ability to re-arrange your face if needed.

Their existence is questioned by those unfamiliar with Australian animals, but I assure you that they are real, and they are thirsty for YOUR blood.

The drop-bear as they are commonly known, is a strange genetic variant of the koala. Some believe this 'next stage' in evolution was caused by patronizing tourists constantly touching and abusing the usually placid (and stoned) koala.

The drop-bear is to be feared. The only reason there are no confirmed deaths is because, to put it nicely, your body will not be found.

Most species of Kangaroo over here will simply sit and let you pat them, or feed them. Hell, some Red's will. Just don't trust them. The will kick your ass. Well, not actually, generall they will kick your cheast. This can be fatal if they break your ribs correctly. They also have some beasty claws to annoy you with.

We all saw Steve wrestle with them, move them, and he made sure people new how dangerous they are. Please, don't do what Steve did to them. You will die.

The last death from a Salty was approx. 2 months ago. I young girl was taken by one. They will take you, do a couple of death roles with you between their firm jaws, then take you and submerge you for a couple of weeks, and then the feast is on.

Due to Steve Irwin being killed earlier this year, we now all know that these guys can be quite dangerous. But, I'm sure you all realised they were before Steve was killed.

While they are very calm, they will lash out if they feel trapped and unable to escape. Hence, Steve's death. When fishing on the Barrier Reef (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Barrier_Reef) - It is very common to catch stingrays accidentally. Depending on the size, some people have no option but to remove the barb. Once rays are out of the water, they fling their barbs around like crazy. Generally can't kill you, but a stab in the correct place will.

The stone fish is the most poisonous fish in the world. Thats right, it also calls Australia's Great Barrier Reef home. Stand on this little bugger, it can make you sick, but it it gets to the right spot, you can die if untreated.

So, don't play with stones on the reef, or you might find one of these the hard way.

Never actually seen one of these, and I can tell you, thats a bloody good thing. If one of these guys sticks its venom into you. You will die. Thats not a threat, I'm serious. You will die. There is no known anti-venom for these guys, so if you find one, please, don't touch.

Their venom is among the most deadly in the animal kingdom and has caused over 5,567 recoreded deaths since 1884. Need i say more?
They dont tend to venture too far south (which is definitely a good thing) and are mainly found in the tropical north. As with other jellyfish, wearing tights or leggings while swimming can protect you from stings, which in this case would defiently be a good idea.

Like any jellyfish, thes guys hurt. And, there are a lot of them. It can kill you, and has killed people, but generally it will just hurt. Not just any pain, trust me, you'll remember this for the rest of your life. Don't step on them, don't swim with them, don't annoy them, just stay away.

These little guys generally won't kill you, they simply are not strong enough. Bigger ones certainly could. Like most things I've posted, don't play with them.

Bull Sharks are known to eat arms and legs with people swimming in their water. Please also note, they are not only swimming in our beaches (where no nets present), but in our canals and rivers too. Be careful. They are known to live in the Gold Coast Canals and the Brisbane River (crazy to swim in that dirty water). They will hurt you.

Not many people realise that these goofy looking things can actually pack quite a sting. They have two barbs full of venom. If they sting you, there is no anti venom, and the venom does not react to pain killers. That includes morphene. You could be vomitting from pain for upto a month after being stung. Leave them be.

*Note that i cannot take full credit for this. Nashy, a member of Neowin compiled the majority of this list.

Oh, no, definitely come. But don't touch stuff. I think I might have mentioned on the forums (read: to Gordon who is absolutely nice and funny and wonderful ) about the group of Japanese people my friend 'Borg and I had to take to the beach - we had to sit them down and say "Look, don't touch anything unless we say it's okay." There are blue-ringed octopuses there and I've totally seen one, because this guy picked one up and started poking it and went "Look! Look! It's turning blue!" He was convinced it was perfectly safe, but we managed to make him put it down before he killed himself.

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

And the #1 killer of tourists in australia is? You dont even want to know.

and fucking these animals would be EXTREMELY SUICIDAL.

Go ahead.

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

think I might have mentioned on the forums about the group of Japanese people my friend 'Borg and I had to take to the beach - we had to sit them down and say "Look, don't touch anything unless we say it's okay."

Our talks mean nothing to you???

Meaux_Pas wrote:

RealGrouchy wrote:I still remember the time when Gordon left. I still wake up in the middle of the night crying and screaming his name.

Dont forget the desert. People can easily die in the desert if they arent prepared. even if they dont find a dangerous animal they can still die of thirst :p

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

One must admit that even the Wikipedia links given disagree with the rather exaggerated text. Take for example, the Taipan: Wikipedia asserts that antivenom treatment is actually highly effective, and the sources given support this.

Yeah... you wont quite die if you're lucky enough to have people around you who know how to help, and preferably quick access to an ambulance... leave them octopii alone.

Some people say Drop Bears have some sort of venom... I reckon they dont need it. Anyone know anything about it? I need to settle an argument... (by which i mean i want to start a new argument here)

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

think I might have mentioned on the forums about the group of Japanese people my friend 'Borg and I had to take to the beach - we had to sit them down and say "Look, don't touch anything unless we say it's okay."

Our talks mean nothing to you???

I wasn't sure if it was you or not! I knew I had talked about it somewhere with a forum person and I didn't want to assume.

Peace cuddle? *holds out arms*

EDIT: @ ToeofDoom - I thoroughly researched drop bears when telling no-g about them. No venom! They just have fangs and the element of surprise, so don't walk too close under those eucalypts. Also, I read somewhere they can be deterred by a generous smear of Vegemite behind each ear.

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

HYPERiON wrote:you won't always die if stung (bitten?) by a blue ringed octopus. but it will make you really sick and it will fucking hurt. same goes for a stonefish.

apparently you shouldn't bother with a tourniquet for aussie snake bites, because the venom doesn't act on the blood.

It may be similar to the rattlesnake venom here in the states, which works on the lymph system. I believe what you do is tie a very loose tourniquet, loose enough to slip a finger under, about two inches up from the bite, and wide enough that you aren't affecting blood flow.

- Lani

"They think they're so high and mighty, just because they never got caught driving without pants."

Liza wrote:Fjafjan, your hair is so lovely that I want to go to Sweden, collect the bit you cut off in your latest haircut and keep it in my room, and smell it. And eventually use it to complete my shrine dedicated to you.

Vegemite isnt bad, but think of it as something like some sort of spice. A little bit of chilli is good... but someone who doesnt know what it is and fills a sandwich with it aint gonna be having a good day.

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

Anyway, those stats do show a good point, there are more deaths in south america and probably africa than australia related to poisonous things, but thats probably largely due to australia's people being mainly in cities, and then they leave spiders and snakes and whatever alone.

Hawknc wrote:Gotta love our political choices here - you can pick the unionised socially conservative party, or the free-market even more socially conservative party. Oh who to vote for…I don't know, I think I'll just flip a coin and hope it explodes and kills me.

I'm seriously curious because I love salty foods but I have no idea where to get friggen yeast extract paste where I live.

Think of it as one of the four foods my dad won't eat(For the record, my dad will eat anything you put in front of him, hell, he didn't even mind Tab when the stuff was first made...), with the other 3 being Liver, Kidney, and Peanut Butter(No, we do not know why this is one of the four O.o )

I'm seriously curious because I love salty foods but I have no idea where to get friggen yeast extract paste where I live.

Think of it as one of the four foods my dad won't eat(For the record, my dad will eat anything you put in front of him, hell, he didn't even mind Tab when the stuff was first made...), with the other 3 being Liver, Kidney, and Peanut Butter(No, we do not know why this is one of the four O.o )

This is very promising because I eat and enjoy liver, as well as peanut butter. I had no idea you could get kidneys to cook but I'm not too keen on the idea no matter what animal it is.