Wednesday, July 09, 2014

Sooner rather than later: some pregnancy news

Yesterday Greg and I went to see the doctor. It was a doozy of an appointment with a nonstress test, a growth ultrasound, and a regular doctor's visit. Three in one, let's do this!

I felt a bit uneasy the entire appointment. I'm not sure why, I just felt like everything was going to go wrong any second. You know how you can just tell when things seem a little bit off? That's how it felt. During the ultrasound, doc said that baby still isn't as big as she should be. She continues to measure behind- especially her stomach and legs. Most likely she is healthy, but it is hard to tell if she is getting the nourishment she needs in my belly. My placenta is doing a pretty crappy job, apparently. The baby has also got what the doctor so affectionately calls a "north south problem"- meaning she's still breech. (I can't tell you the number of handstands in the pool I've done. And for nothing!)

"From here, our best option is to deliver the baby sooner rather than later," explained the doctor. "We need to try to turn her, and the bigger she gets, the harder it is to turn her- the less space she has." Greg and I stared blankly at him, not saying a word. What exactly dis this phrase "sooner rather than later" mean?

"In addition, at this point she is far along enough and healthy enough that we can deliver at any time," doc continued. "It may be better to deliver now and then monitor her nourishment outside the womb, that way we can ensure she is getting all the nourishment she needs, instead of not knowing for sure while she's still inside."

More blank stares from me and Greg.

"So... when would this be?" I asked.

"Likely within a week."

"A WEEK?"

"Yes. A week. The absolute latest we would let you go is 39 weeks, so... a week and a half max."

"We're not ready at all!" I told the doctor. As if that had anything to do with it.

He gave a chuckle and poked fun at us just a bit, "Well, you did know you were pregnant, right? I mean, hopefully the news that you are having a baby is not a surprise..."

Touche, doc. Touche.

I suppose the thing is that because I was measuring small the whole pregnancy, we erroneously thought that meant that I would have the baby late. We have always been a couple weeks behind so in our minds that meant the baby would arrive a couple of weeks behind. Makes sense, right? Anytime someone asked us the due date we'd stupidly say, "July 25, but she won't come until at least a week after that, probably the first week of August." Yes, because we are the experts on when our first baby will decide to make her appearance into the world. Oh, what a couple of idiots we are.

We ended the appointment with the doc telling me to schedule an appointment with the perinatologist- the special ultrasound guy- for a second opinion. So that's where we ended up- with another doctor in another building in another dark room with more warm squishy gel slathered all over my stomach. Doc #2 said yes, baby needs to come by at least 39 weeks and have a great day!

Pure panic.

I thought I had at least 3-4 more weeks to get ready for baby. No big deal, no hurry, take it easy, all these other stressed out pregnant women just need to chillax, I was thinking. But nope. Instead of in four weeks, I will have my baby in one week... 39 weeks is a week from tomorrow. A WEEK FROM TOMORROW.

The rest of yesterday was basically a frenzy. We have SO much to do before the baby comes. We wanted so badly to be in our home when she arrived, but that will definitely not be happening. So now we have to get ready to welcome her home here, in our little one bedroom apartment. We need a place (or thing?) where she can sleep, diapers, onesies, pacifiers, car seat stat! There was so much to do, but as soon as we got home I rushed from room to room like a chicken with its head cut off, accomplishing absolutely nothing. My mind couldn't focus on any one thing long enough to think logically or coherently about what action needed to follow, so naturally I just started washing and folding baby clothes like a mad man until I realized I had absolutely nowhere in our little apartment to put said clothes. I then flipped out on Greg, started a dishwasher that was nowhere near full and finally fled to the grocery store to buy a box of otter pops.

38 comments:

I love how honest and open you are in all your posts. I really enjoy reading your blog! I wish I could send you a big hug and a piece of chocolate cake via the internet to help you feel better, but alas this fleeting comment must suffice. Hang in there!

Sounds pretty normal in my opinion. Believe you-me I know what it's like to have baby come early. My first decided labor would be good at 37 weeks on the dot and my (then) husband was in Mexico. So, I had to give birth without him. You will be fine. Essential needed: car seat because they won't let you take her home without it. :D I'm guessing you will want to do that sooner or later. The rest is simple. Diapers, onesies and spitup cloths. (unless you bottle feed and then bottles and formula) Truly it is much more simple than we as first time moms make it out to be. Relax and enjoy it because it will go by ((snap)) and you will wonder why you ever fretted. :) Prayers for good labor and easy birth!! And most of all that she is healthy.

BTW I'm a semi- new reader and I too love the humor and honesty in your blog. :D

You're going to be just fine. Like Kristen said, the only things that you will absolutely NEED at the beginning are diapers, wipes, a bulb syringe (which they'll likely give you at the hospital), thin blankets, a carseat, and some basic clothes. Newborns don't move much so they can and will sleep anywhere. Ask the nurses at the hospital to show you how to swaddle her. Swaddling is magic. Seriously.

Just a word for the wise- don't buy a ton of diapers and wipes before she is born. Some babies are sensitive to different types (mine couldn't wear Huggies but Pampers were good and the generic version worked best for him). Just buy two packages or so. Part of the baby process is navigating the minefield of "YOU MUST BUY ALL THE BABY STUFF!" and realizing that you don't need ALL the baby stuff. Newborns need very little. Here's a secret: nobody is ever *ready* for their first baby, no matter how much stuff they have or how long the baby has been in there. You'll be ok.

I was the same. My daughter's stomach was measuring in the 6th percentile and my high risk doctor suggested that I be induced at 37 weeks. I was at my appointment and had an ultrasound and he basically was like, 'Why don't you go home and get your hospital bag?' Umm what? Why do I need that?! 'We're going to induce you tonight' lol ugh. I went into the same frenzy mode you are now. Honestly, buy the car seat, a couple of onesies and sleepers, swaddling blankets, diapers, wipes that don't contain alcohol. Do you have a bassinet? Best place for your baby to sleep for the first 3 months is in a bassinet beside your bed. Don't worry, you'll do great! Once she's home and you get into a routine, you'll forget all about this panic.

Oh, and I'm happy to report that my daughter is now 4.5 months old and is measuring in the 50th percentile in both height and weight so she is doing excellent! It's true that some babies do better on the outside than inside towards the end.

I wish I could say something that would calm you down, but I am pretty sure there is nothing in this world that could do it for you right now :) My hubby and I are planning to get pregnant within the next 6 months, and I find that overwhelming hahah! From what I was told though, once all the fun begins, you are only thinking about your baby and her well-being, so try not to worry too much :) PLus, I'd guess, it's a bit easier when the baby is smaller hehe :) All the best! <3 xoxo

I can't imagine how stressful it must have been to hear that!! I will be praying for you and Greg and Baby Girl this week. I'm not a mom so I have absolutely no advice, but does it help to know that you're a really adorable pregnant lady? Just remember that once you have the baby, you can send Greg out for anything you realize you need. Oh, I don't know if this will help, but when my sister had her first baby last year she was pretty organized, but she didn't have any onesies with the long sleeves that fold over the hands, mitten cuffs I think they're called. And that is the extent of my baby advice. But really, I'll be praying for your family!

Pretty much the last thing a pregnant woman needs is for things to not go the way she thought they would. Like pregnancy isn't stressful enough. You'll be great. You'll probably want a pack 'n play and she can sleep in that for a while. Most of them have a newborn sleeper that comes with it. The carseat is a definite must. Basically you just need one good trip to Target and you'll be set.

I totally feel where you are coming from. My first born came 4 weeks early unexpectedly and I freaked out. Seriously lost my flippin mind but as a mom you adjust and adapt. Everything will be just fine <3

The good thing is that newborns don't need a lot. Go to Target and get a car seat, a pack and play that comes with a newborn sleeper, some diapers, some wipes, and one of those plastic drawer things to hold her clothes. It sounds like she'll be in the hospital for a few days so you will have a little more time. I'm sure your family will be a lot of help when they come in and you can give them some things to do. When you look at her you will know her name.

Try not to freak out. I had two 36 week on the dot surprises when my water broke. The first one I was unprepared for but we made it work. The second one (born 7.5 weeks ago) I was ready for due to the help of a list. A check list is great cause then your husband can actually see what needs to be done and help. I checked off the final items within 8 hours of my water breaking but I did it!! Ok so I'm going to write a novel about what you need since I am such an awesome authority and all (j/k)

1) I'd buy an infant car seat right now. yes you'll need a convertible later but that isn't until at least 8 month-1 yr so that buys you time and the bucket style seat is so convenient. You can probably skip the stroller for now since the infant seat will buy you portability until you figure out what you want in a stroller. Personally I like a cheap "snap and go" stroller to use with the infant seat then I bought a decent lightweight stroller down the road so you aren't stuck with one of those ungodly heavy combo ones2) I'd buy a pack and play with a bassinet feature. The baby can sleep in it now and eventually it is good for travel or as a baby changer3) pacifier you'll get one at the hospital, see if she likes it and buy more otherwise you may need to try others4) diapers get one big box of newborn size (since she is small) and one 3 pack of wipes. you might not like the first brand so don't lock yourself into a bunch you end up hating and cursing at 3am when your baby leaks out again 5) diaper bag- if you have a big beach bag or a large purse just use that for now, then you can see how much junk you like to haul around and buy a diaper bag that fits your style. i tend to pack for a natural disaster and like a huge message style bag6) Breast pump- will your health insurance cover at all? if so you'll want to follow their rules and get what they cover7) bottles just buy a small set and see from there, babies can be picky. I like dr brown since I have gassy, spit-uppy babies but some people just use the pump ones to save time washing bottles8) I like a bouncer to have somewhere to set the baby when you need to take a shower or eat dinner9) Sleepers- babies can wear these 24-7 which saves you from dealing with pants and socks since you probably won't go out too much for the first couple weeks.

You're going to be just fine! Everything will come together and now that you know exactly how much longer you have you'll cram it all in!! Get a car seat, some onesies, some sleepers and a bassinet or a pack and play with the bassinet (I recommend the latter so when she's too big for the bassinet you can just use the pack and play and you aren't stuck with a big piece of furniture you won't need for a while). As previous poster mentions, get some diapers - buy premie size and also newborn size just in case she's too small for newborn. You can return premie if you need to but this way you're prepared either way ( we liked pampers with our girl; but have since switched to target brand and those are just as great and way, way cheaper)

You may not end up bringing her home to your apartment if she's undernourished, because that might mean she spends a few weeks in the hospital getting her up to good levels? So maybe the first time you bring her home will be to your new house. Just a thought, but I could be totally wrong, seeing as I've never had a baby before and have zero medical knowledge. Haha :) Good luck though! You'll do great :)

You really don't need much at the beginning anyway. Lots of diapers and wipes, a few blankets, and you'll be fine. Get some tiny pajamas that zip up (Target sells them in a 3 pack) because that is so much easier in the middle of the night than all those blasted snaps. And maybe get some newborn size t-shirts (not onesies) for her to wear until her umbilical falls off. Seems like all my son wore the first few days was a diaper and a t-shirt and a blanket. And relax... think of all the less intelligent people who have successfully given birth to and raised perfectly adequate children. You'll do great!

Thanks for sharing this so honestly - your reaction was priceless and almost exactly how I imagine mine would be! We're sort of expecting ours to be late too, since I was the firstborn and I was late (is that real logic or wishful thinking?) and if they flipped that around on us I'd lose it.That said, I hope you have a chance to get everything you absolutely need all set up - mostly that car seat!

You are never fully prepared to have a baby, the first 3 months are the hardest and at the end of the day everything is going to be ok. Take it easy enjoy the slow moments while you prep this week and remember is you need help fro family or friends ask.

Welcome to motherhood! You will never, ever have it figured out- no matter how hard you try to force it. But, your baby (and you) will be just fine! Since you have a smaller space for now, this is what I recommend- a pack n play with a changing table built in OR just a changing table pad. Get a table when you have more space. Baby may not sleep in the pack n play in the beginning, my baby loved the rock n play and especially his swing. You can get all of these on Craigslist for cheap(er). About 10 easy to get on and off pj's. It's summer and I have no idea what temp you keep your place. She may just need simple onesies or footed jammies (zip up ones are best). I would recommend some kind of wrap- moby or one similar. Put my guy to sleep every time. Bibs and burp cloths. and I LOVED our swaddleMe and halo sleep sac swaddle blankets (I never figured out how to swaddle with just a blanket). Also, lots of snacks for you and lots of TV shows lined up. The first couple months may be the last time you watch TV again. My little man in 8 months and I haven't watched TV in over 6 months! THe first few months are HARD, but it does get SO AMAZING! I promise. So excited for you to meet your little lady!

I agree with the Fisher Price Rock n Play and velcro swaddle blankets. My daughter slept in that the first couple months and was easy to move around the house. She didn't like being flat on her back in the pack n play. Not even sure why we put the nursery together before she was born!

Bon, I can't offer you any advice because I don't have any to give you (never been pregnant myself). What I can tell you is that you and Greg will rock this! No you have no idea what to expect when you have your baby, but it'll be fine! Your friends and family will help you out will all the stuff while you guys get to focus on your BABY! Keep us posted! :)

I wish I could give some piece of advice that would be more comforting or calming to you, but at least I can say that I have complete faith that you and Greg will manage to pull it all together and be wonderful parents to your little girl. Wishing you the very best Bonnie! You'll figure the mom thing out ;)

You can do it! I don't think you ever feel ready. I had my little guy last week at 38 weeks. And it's the most amazing thing. You and Greg will be great parents. Also, try rocking on an exercise ball. That helped my guy get in perfect position.

Oh my goodness!! So not like what my doctor said at all... ha. That would totally freak me out! I freaked out just when they said last week I could have the baby. But you can do this!! I went out and got diapers and wipes, a couple of onesies, a blanket, and washed our bassinet sheets and felt a lot more prepared. Babies only need a few, very little things, and especially with moving you don't need to stock up like crazy yet. You got this for sure! :)

Gee whiz! Well, if it make you feel better, I was a first born, and our little family moved to South Korea when I was 2 WEEKS old. We moved again when one of my brothers was a month, and another brother was 5 weeks. Bad planning? ;) Maybe just makes us more flexibility and a gives you a good story. God gave my mom super powers, and he'll give them to you. <3

Ahhh stressful, but so exciting too! Can't even imagine your jumble of emotions right now. And remember - just breathe. The only thing that matters is the baby's health; everything else will work itself out :) Will be thinking of you!

After my bleeding incident, we visited a perinatologist and they said the same thing: Rhys's abdomen was measuring small and his kidneys were backed up an they were nervous I'd start bleeding again and worse before labor. So they wanted to induce me at 39 weeks cuz they thought he'd do better out here. I was nervous! We moved that week, but were so blessed to have my family help! Don't be afraid to ask for help or hand-me-downs! You can do it!

My first kiddo slept in a laundry basket that was padded with blankets for the first month of his life.... He never even knew the difference, in fact it was nice to have him close and not have something bulky to trip over. Very portable too. You can do this and make it work! Things don't have to be perfect because all that needs to happen is that you ask for help when you need it and you love your kiddo. Sending thoughts and prayers your way!