Thursday, 12 January 2012

A Letter to my Junior High Self

Dear Junior High Melissa,

You're right. Life is hard, and your Mom doesn't really understand. She's trying to though - the best a Mom can actually. Maybe give her a bit of a break when she tries to talk to you after school. Listen instead of staring at the TV. You're going to miss these times one day.

OK, let's start with the basics. Please cover yourself up. The clothes you wear directly affect how people view you. It may sound harsh, but it's very true. The stares you are getting from boys does not mean they like you or want to take you for a nice dinner and treat you well. It means that you have something they want, and that is all. You body is an object to them. This is a dispicable truth, but something you can actually change. Put on a sweater. Go. Do it now. Also, the stares you get from other girls has nothing to do with jealousy (stop kidding yourself!)

Thank you Lord that there are no Facebook profile pictures yet.

The acceptance you desire will not be found where you are looking. The love you are seeking cannot be fulfilled through the silly 2 month relationships you are so jealous of. Your relationship status does not determine your worth. In fact, the opposite is true. The truth of your worth is rooted in Jesus Christ. The longer you choose not to believe that, the more damage you will do for yourself in the long run.

Try to see the difference between being friends with the "right people", and having friends that treat you right. Don't allow yourself to get caught up in the comparison game. There will always be a prettier, more popular girl. In your effort to be more like someone else, you are robbing the world of who God made you to be. You are blind to what you have to offer the world, but your family and your friends (the really good ones) will try to convince you that you are better than you think. Listen to them.

Speaking of perceptions being out of whack: You are not fat. Not even close, actually. Please do me (your older self) a favour and figure this one out early. Dress in clothes that flatter your body and your shape, and stop crying over the fact that a Small doesn't fit you anymore. You are no longer in elementary school. It's actually quite normal for your size to change over the years. Odd concept, I know. Eat well, but do it for the right reasons- your health! Care more about how many years you are in this world than the way the world views you and your appearance.

In these years you will meet a lot of new people. You will have your first boyfriend (and your first break up.) You will survive heartache. You will discover that you love music, and you will belt out Brittany Spears, Christina Aguilara (and Mariah Carey, only to realize that most voices don't have that kind of range) at the top of your lungs. You will find out that you love art class (and hate French class) You may or may not develop a crush on a certain Math teacher only to find out 13 years later that his daughter is the same age as the girls you are mentoring and see pictures of him on Facebook. (Weeeeird) You will make mistakes, (and unfortunetely learn very little from them.) You will have fun. You will do silly things that you pray your daughter never does. (Walking around Larose Drive until 2 am? What on earth were we thinking??) You will form friendships that will last you a lifetime.

There are ups and downs, and times you wish you could skip this whole stage of life. You can't, so suck it up and enjoy it while it lasts, because if there is one peice of advice I can give, it would be to treasure it because it all goes WAY too fast.

Meet Melissa

I'm wild about lattes and I have a thing for the perfect plate of nachos. I love bold feature walls and DIY art and my house is filled with both. I'm married to a handsome bearded, tattooed man who happens to be a pastor, and I'm a Mommy to a three year old boy and a baby girl. The three of them just about make up my world. I love trying new restaurants, reading books, and sitting across a coffee shop table from like minded women. My life is messy, but chock full of grace. Good thing too, because without it I would surely lose my footing.