Strangely enough, from this, a lot of you have been asking exactly how my parents met, and married, and created these wonderfully adorable half Asian babies. This really just leads me to thinking that all you people are working for Hallmark, and looking for the next Hallmark original movie. Which definitely could be my parents. You’re definitely not looking to steal my story. I mean, I have, what? Crying in bathtubs?

Yeah. I did that once.

I even illustrated it. With Crayons. Don’t leave me alone with crayons.

Anyway. That leads me to this week’s post. Everyone has some sort of great love story that they know and love. We’ve all seen The Notebook. If you are female and don’t say that you want to be Rachel McAdams circa Ryan Gosling slamming her against the wall all rain-soaked and horny then you are a lying chatch-canoe who doesn’t deserve a love story. Therefore I bring you, my top five most loved love stories ever. Because I’m single. And I can.

5. Carl and Ellie: if you don’t know who I’m talking about, you’re obviously not a Disney fan. They are all sorts of internet meme-things going around saying that Pixar made a better love story in five minutes than Stephanie Meyers did in four books. And they are all correct. If you didn’t cry during this opening part of Disney-Pixar’s UP, then you have no soul.

4. The Notebook: see above comment. Rain-soaked Ryan Gosling. Oh, and it’s an adorable movie with such a good love story [except for James Marsden]. #Myfavoritemoviequote was trending all over twitter last night, and despite all the assholes declaring that 21 Jump Street apparently has better quotes than Almost Famous or Dead Poet’s Society, there was a hell of a lot of:

Not my favorite quote from the movie, but still.

Nicholas Sparks better be happily married for the number of sappy love stories he writes for us, or I’m seriously going to egg his house.

3. Bobo and Cosi:No, you don’t know this love story. Because it’s not a love story in books, it’s one of those crazy things that actually happened in real life. My junior year in high school, I set up my best friend CoSi (back then, she was CoMc) with my friend Bobo for our fall homecoming dance. When I say “set up,” I definitely mean “forced into going so I wouldn’t feel awkward at said dance.” But that’s not the point. The point is that they ended up dating. The point is that they ended up continuing to date all through high school, and into college, and I was privileged enough to be in their wedding two summers ago. Bobo signed my yearbook after junior year saying thank you for setting them up. But really. I’m thankful for them for falling in love and staying in love. Maybe there’s hope for me yet.

2. Rachel and Ross: I grew up with my favorite six friends and their coffee shop ploys. All ten seasons, I wanted Ross and Rachel to get together and stay together because I was convinced they were one of those TV couples that was just like real life. I wanted someone to dress up in a tux for me if my prom date didn’t show up. I wanted someone to sneak me into a museum for a romantic night under the planetarium. I wanted someone to be my lobster.

1. the hallmark story of how my parentals met and i was brought into existence (abridged version slash how i’ve heard it through the years): As I’ve heard it, my father had a friend who knew my mother. Mutual friend, normal introduction, right? Yes, except for the fact that my father was living in St. Louis and my mother was in Hong Kong at the time. Therefore…

You’re leaving me here, dear. Alone with all your letters.

…they became pen pals. Letter upon letter upon letter, enough to fill a few file cabinet drawers in my house, which my sister and I would later discover. And somehow through these letters, they fell in love. My father then saved up money to visit my mom where she was an au pair in Hong Kong — where they officially met for the first time. While he was in Hong Kong, he traveled with her to the Philippines, so he could meet her family, since it cost less to fly from there than it would to go from the states. And while they were there, they got married.

Fast forward, to another wedding in the US, to my sister being born, to me being born, to something like 28 years of marriage and counting.

Nicholas Sparks, back off. My parents’ real story kicks the ass of some of yours.

So, now you know. My top five most romantical stories. What are yours? AND are you super sad like I am that you’re single right now?

…just because you don’t like seafood doesn’t mean you won’t find your lobster. You don’t eat your lobster. This is love, not cannibalism! Lol. Hopefully Ken doesn’t see this response and turn it into a …different kind of eating.