Hippo Stuck in Swimming Pool

Solace in a soak after being chased by his herd

Hippos are the worst. After being bullied by his herd, a South African hippopotamus has found sanctuary in an eight-foot-deep swimming pool at the Monate Conservation Lodge. One problem: there are no steps, so the four-year-old beast is stuck. Officials have been feeding him and say that he's seemed relatively relaxed since escaping the more dominant males. The pool was deep enough for the animal to have a swim, but the lodge staff has had to slowly drain the water as it’s become murky with hippo poop. Officials plan on sedating the hippo and then lifting him out of the pool with a crane on Friday. He will then be moved to another animal sanctuary since he’s no longer welcome with his herd. I hope you’re happy with yourselves, other hippos.