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Hey if orgasms are what is most important to a person then yeah more power to that i guess. Far be it from me to use judgmental disembodied words on an anonymous message board to deny someone the best possible orgasms they can have.

I tell you, these "triad" people are just all over this board. It becomes boring after a while. Where are all the "I'm single and poly! I want to have 2 lovers, and I don't care if they fuck each other, but I'd kinda rather they don't!" peeps at?

No, it's always "my husband and I want a 3rd," over and over and over, amen.

__________________Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw

I tell you, these "triad" people are just all over this board. It becomes boring after a while.

Maybe it's time to redefine 'poly' to exclude that category of relationship. Then you can just tell them to piss off since they don't belong here (which is sort of what is happening already in a rather tedious, long-winded sort of fashion).

__________________Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all beings in the world.

Maybe it's time to redefine 'poly' to exclude that category of relationship. Then you can just tell them to piss off since they don't belong here (which is sort of what is happening already in a rather tedious, long-winded sort of fashion).

I assume you are being sarcastic?

The counter argument is polyamory simply mean loving more than 1. This site (and I know that this ISN'T true) may seem any triad but redefining poly itself so it only suits the "relationship structures" that the people on this site believe to be viable.. is just plain bullshit. Everyone has a right to want, need, crave and try to do what they do.

There are successful triads, short term and long term. If people in poly would stop trying to pigeon hole the relationship structure and simply work on the relationships they would likely be a lot further ahead.

You just think the word would be out by now. So many people, (myself included, but that was back in 1999), have this wonderful fantasy and it (99%) of the time goes the same way.

"We are different! My husband and I want to share a third, a bi female. We've talked about it. We'd love to share our home and bed with her. She must like kids. She must love us both equally! It will be beautiful. Of course my husband and I can have sex together, but our third will only have sex with both of us at once. We can text each other privately as we've always done, but all her texts must be read by both of us. My husband and I will date as usual, but all our dates with our third will be with both of us too. This will prevent jealousy! My husband and I can't wait to share this experience together, it will really enhance our relationship!"

And how rare it is they think any more ahead than that! And how often this arrangement lasts 6 months, tops. And they go back on the hunt... "she just wasnt the right girl."

__________________Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw

N, j and I have had "sexy movie night" plenty of times. 3way without us girls foiling around. It was really freaking hot. I see nothing wrong with that. For a newly poly situation this can be a nice way of easing into the sexual aspect of things.

__________________
Sue, hinge in a vee with Nate (Polysexual) and Sam (monogamous)

Good luck, sounds like you have some fun NRE, for the record sharing the bed with a woman does not mean you need to be involved with the woman. Men do it all the time, I find it funny so many people are clueless about the mechanics behind 3 straights.

Ahhh...an excellent point (that I should be making more frequently, I think).

My boys and I have threesomes on a periodic basis (I love it!) - they are both straight. I've had threesomes with me and another woman and my husband, where the other woman and I weren't intimate or where she and he weren't intimate. You can carry the Vee dynamic right into the bedroom if everyone is comfortable with that...

You guys are missing the point. Of course 2 straight men, or women, can have a 3some with another guy or woman, as long as there is a matchup somewhere. 2 straight women touching a het guy, 2 het guys touching a het woman, whatev.

The point is, this was (originally, maybe not now) a [/i]requirement[/i] in true unicorn hunting style, as I outlined above. That's where it all goes pear shaped. heh

__________________Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw