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Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Tree Trimming Blues

Sara and I spent an afternoon of our long holiday weekend putting up our Christmas Tree! This was the first year Sara was really old enough to understand the concept and help with the task. I handed out the ornaments and decorated the top, while Sara decorated the bottom. She still has a little bit to learn, like you can't put 3 or 4 ornaments on the same branch, but we had a good time and that's what counts!

Here is the end result of all our "hard" work! Sara said she thinks its the best tree ever, and that's good enough for me!

But even with the tree up, it still doesn't seem like Christmas is right around the corner. I don't even feel like it could possibly be Thanksgiving. Maybe its because of the lack of snow we've had this year, or the lack of really cold days.

And it could be the fact that I'm not looking forward to it since Sara will be with her dad on Christmas. I've never spent Christmas without her before, so I know that is going to be really hard. Usually I feel like Christmas can't get here fast enough, but this year it seems to be bearing down on me like a train and I'm tied to the tracks.

This year will be very different than any year before it, and I have no idea how to handle it. I guess there's no point in worrying about it till it gets here; there's nothing I can do to change it. I just hope there's enough going on elsewhere that I don't have too much time to think about her not being there. This year is going to be one of the hardest Christmas' I've ever had!

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I am blessed to have my daughter, Sara, in my life. And although she brings more challenges then most children because of her NF, I think it makes myself and the people around us appreciate life even more. We are blessed to have amazing family and friends to share this adventure with, and to count on when times are rough! Being a single mom isn't always easy, but being her mother is the best thing that ever happened to me!