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Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

No schedule doesn't mean no routine and no predictability! I found that the first few weeks with a newborn were totally bonkers. Sleeping, waking, and nursing were all over the map. Sometimes baby would nurse for 5 minutes and then sleep 3 hours, sometimes she'd be up nursing for hours in the middle of the night. Sometimes she would nap 5 times a day, other days she would hardly nap at all. But eventually both my girls settled into very predictable routines, and I could easily plan my life around them. For example, eventually both my LOs took a morning nap, usually around 10 a.m., sometimes a little earlier, sometimes a little later. I knew I could nurse the baby, go to the store, get my groceries, nurse again, and then the baby would fall asleep in the car on the way home, and would sleep while I put the groceries away. And if I had to stretch that routine a little to accommodate another errand or a chat with a friend, that was okay!

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

Wow- I am so pumped to read all of your responses and input! It is a new day! WhEW!

I will try to answer all of your questions- I don't want to leave anyone out- ALL of the replies were helpful!!
I have actually taken the babe out in public somewhat and nursed him- I wont let anything stop me from feeding my child ya know! But at a family gathering, even with a cover, a few people were a little squeemish about it-I've always been so worried about what other people think. but you know what- I just need to get over that! Motherhood and turning a new leaf! So yes, I do need to get out a little more, infact, I think we are going out for a stroll in a bit, it isn't as blazing hot today- it does do wonders. I don't know why I get so caught up in my own little mini-world inside the house with the babe- I was looking forward to being a mom but had NO idea it would be so consuming, such a bond, I am so wrapped up into my baby! LOVIN IT! I know this time wont last long so Im all in. I def have ups and downs through the day though, emotions and feelings in an uproar, trying to get balanced out- thankful I am nursing so it isn't as bad as it could be.-
And I love the idea that was metioned, not schedule but routine seems right- also noticing little 'patterns' at this point. I know it will get better- thanks for the reminders!
Also my husband tries to help me and he is great- but he isnt experiencing this first hand and so he frustrates me somewhat! LOL little vent there sorry. I am blessed and he is very supportive of breast feeding- he says Im doing great. But its more than just a simple act and done- its a lifestyle im learning!
The people who are helping me the most- my mother and sister- they are actually amazing and invaluable so I dont want to knock them too much! They come to my rescue and help me with so much. But they are commenting about the pacifer and schedule- my mom did bf but she seems to have forgotten some things and thats ok. My sis didn't bf, wanted to but had some complications w c sec and things, so she doesnt really understand- she is really hoping to someday now that she has witnessed it w me. Had a friend who made a comment about him just being a 'snacker' and it has bothered me. It was only a small glimpsed in my day- But anyway, these comments are what Im talking about. Love my WAB book and these forums! Thank you!

Has anyone ever started a LLL group in their hometown? I am searching for one but Im pretty sure there isnt one. I know it would be great! Thanks again!

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

Quick ques-
Do you think that at 5 weeks in I should still be keepin down times and freq/ duration of each session? I have a nice baby tracker/planner I just got, after I went through meticulous notes on reg paper. I am sure this is just a personal pref- and Im using it to keep track of sleep, play time, and just also juust as a memento and baby diary

But did I read that after 1 month they will possibly nurse less freq? just wondering. actually, it seems like he is nursing MORE now that I am less worried about TIME and sched. I want him to be happy and healthy! so glad for all the solid and helpful advice!

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

I think that you can be nice and still make it clear that schedules and pacifiers are not up for discussion. Particularly schedules. Schedules are dangerous. What if you simply explain that schedules are associated with failure to thrive when you are breastfeeding and as such it is not something that you will be doing? That is just stating a fact, not knocking anyone.

As long as everything seems to be going well, I would stop tracking. You are just making more work for yourself at this point, and no one needs more work.

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

i agree - no need to track. do be aware that your baby's doctor will probably ask you how frequently & for how long you nurse - it's totally ok to give a random ballpark guess, or even to say "on demand which means whenever she wants"! don't get freaked out by those questions and assume you're supposed to be tracking it or scheduling it; the questions are more appropriate for formula feeding babies and not all docs are so up-to-date .

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

Also, I'm still up in the air about pacifiers. I mean, really its not the end of the world, I just dont want it to get in the way of lo getting enough to eat. I've seen it successful with some and i would rather use one than deal with thumb/finger sucking right? ANy experience is welcome!

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

I think the pacifier is just a personal choice; there's no real right or wrong answer with that. I used one ith my baby because he refused to comfort nurse because of my OALD. I'm not really crazy about them though. I was just very judicious in how I used it. If he fussed I would offer to nurse him, check his diaper, rock or walk with him, then offer the pacifier. It was my last resort. It didn't interfere with his nursing at all.

ETA: I would be a little concerned about other caregivers mixing up cues, however, because they are pushing so hard for the pacifier.

Re: Trying to stay strong and stick to my guns!

I just want to throw this out there: when someone says 'schedule' do you actually ask them what they mean?

I do a baby-led routine/schedule... Depending which term my brain recalls in the moment, but either way it's still baby led and quite flexible. As much as possible, I plan my day around her/their needs and I'm not above offering a feed early if I absolutely have to make a particular time. That's just life. It's a bit hurtful to see people saying schedule = heart of stone (or other rather harsh terms) when all it may be is a personal definition of two different words.