Dating sites as individual entities shine, or not, in various ways with devices to match you with potential mates, entertain you with tests and questionnaires, and present you with pictures and profiles in varies formats. There is one site however which excels in organising for its members regular singles parties.

This was the fifth event I have attended and the first local one. Actually, rather uncomfortably so. I found myself going back to my roots and finding they needed re-touching.

The party was hosted by a newly re-furbished pub at the end of the street where I spent the first three months of my life and this gave me a clearer picture of why my parents were so eager to move. I would not, in print, like to accuse the neighbourhood of being rough. Suffice it to say that I have never seen security staff carrying tazers before. 'Nuff said.

Three of my brothers had a agreed to turn up which we did at the start time only to learn that it would be an hour and half before the DJ kicked in. Excuse me. Would begin playing music. This party would have been enjoyed by fans of Karaoke but unfortunately for those of us who had gone to dance, it was abortive and frustrating not to mention, carpeted (A 'dance floor'?). In addition, the manners of the men in general were below the standard of the events held in Islington and the West End. I can't think why.

Two of my brothers left half way through, and the remaining one and I stuck it out until he'd checked out a potential match and spent some time with a drink recovering from the Monet Effect (needs to be appreciated from a distance).

I took him away from it all to compare the delights of my sanctum where I often dance. The Blessed Local where they know what I drink and what I like to dance to, where the security staff are unarmed and take excellent care of me, where the floor is wooden and unmistakeably an area for dancing. A great end to the night.

On a positive note, food was provided at the event and the view of the trees and ground at the back of the pub was almost rural in the early evening sunlight. Furthermore I had some time with my brothers and we all had a go at a Christmas cracker puzzle I'd brought with me. What more can you ask?

One thing I would like to see at my local: the security armed with cattle prods to be applied to anyone found standing on the dancefloor, committing the double crime of taking up dance-floor space and inspecting the dancers at unacceptably close range. In fact, if they needed any help, I would be prepared to surrender some of my precious dancing time to come up with some creative ideas about how best to apply the electricity. Would you care to contribute? Answers on a postcard :)