Moe: Just a sec. Hey, is there a Butz here? Seymour Butz? Hey, everybody! I want a Seymour Butz! [the entire bar laughs; realizes] Wait a minute... Listen, you little scum-sucking pus-bucket! When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna pull out your eyeballs with a corkscrew!

Moe: Hold on, I'll check. [calls] Mike Rotch! Mike Rotch! Hey, has anybody seen Mike Rotch lately?! [snickers from the patrons] [to phone] Listen to me, you little puke. One of these days, I'm going to catch you, and I'm going to carve my name on your back with an ice pick!

Moe: [believes this to be another prank call] Oh... So you're looking for a Mr. Smithers, eh?... First name Waylon, is it?! Listen to me, you! When I catch you, I'm gonna pull out your eyes, and shove 'em down your pants, so you can watch me kick the crap outta you, okay? Then I'm gonna use your tongue to paint my boat!

[He and the other patrons laugh. The scene switches from Australia as Bart calls a bar in Sweden. The bar's name, Inga Bar Beermans]

Swedish Bartender: I shall enquire. Is there a Mr. Myfriendsaregay, first name Olaf? Attention everyone, "Olaf Myfriendsaregay!" [bar denizens laugh] Wait a minute, if I ever get a hold of you, I will thank you for showing me the futility of human endeavor.

[Moe is on the witness stand of Bart's school trial over one of his prank calls]

Skinner: Mr. Szyslak, what name did the defendant ask for when he called you at your bar?

Moe: He asked for um... Mike Rotch.

Skinner: And then what did you say?

Moe: Well, I said um.. I said "Mike Rotch, Mike Rotch." And then I... [starts crying] I'm sorry.

Skinner: Take all the time you need.

Moe: I uh... I uh... I yelled out "Has anybody seen Mike Rotch? [everyone gasps] You see, they... they thought I was asking if anybody wanted to see Mi-- Oh man, this is so painful. Mike Rotch! " [continues crying as everyone gasps and look at Bart angrily]

Skinner: Thank you for your bravery today.

Moe: I just had to make sure that he never did this to another bartender.