A Definite Do: Dividing Household Duties

A friend of mine recently lost her job. To keep herself busy while looking for a new one, she kept the apartment she shares with her boyfriend spotless and made dinner for him every single night. Things were fine for about a month.

Her guy loved not having to lift a finger but eventually she started to feel resentful toward him. Fast forward to big argument about him bringing home the bacon and her contribution to the household without a paycheck. Thankfully, they’ve worked out their issues by dividing up the chores. Very specifically. We’re talking chore charts. If it works for them, wonderful. But I have some difficulty wrapping my head around being told exactly what I have to clean and when.

When I moved in with Chris, we decided to divide up duties based on rooms in the apartment. Which, now that I think about it, seems sort of silly because our one-bedroom is pretty tiny. Here’s how it shakes out: the living room, bedroom and “hallway” are Chris’ responsibilities while the bathroom and kitchen are mine. That’s not to say that I don’t wash laundry or Chris won’t do the dishes. Most of the time, our system works fine. But there are other times when I see the flaws—I’ll leave shoes and coats flung about the living room or Chris will make a snack for himself and leave everything out. In fact, I’m currently eyeing a large piece of cake he was snacking on earlier that is somehow still on the kitchen counter waiting to be put away. There is one duty we absolutely share, though. It’s cat litter patrol. If one of us walks by and notices it needs to be tended to, we’re on it ASAP. Also, when Gabby our cat decides to go all renegade on us and do her business elsewhere, the first person to spot it cleans it.

How do you divide household chores? If one of you stays at home full-time, does the other partner clean/cook less? When it comes to chores, do you ever feel like your man takes you for granted? What’s your least favorite chore? Are there any you don’t mind? I actually don’t mind scrubbing sinks and toilets!

P.S. alisha8306: A few weeks back, you mentioned that your kitty Leila looks just like my Gabby! Your pic never came through, but if you’d like to resend, feel free to email it to me here. I’d love to see what she looks like!