Dr. Stephanie Kriesberg has her Doctorate in Clinical Psychology. As a clinical psychologist, she brings over twenty years’ experience to her private practice located in Concord, Massachusetts. She specializes in helping parents, children, teens, and adults with narcissistic parents lead healthier, happier lives as well as children with selective mutism. And I think it’s amazing that she offers skype coaching for adults with narcissistic parents. You can check out more of Dr. Stephanie Kriesberg at drstephaniekriesberg.com

IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS:

The stigma around “going to therapy” + what therapy is, who it’s for, and the life-changing benefits of it. The education you gain from going to therapy

Well-meaning friends and loved one may encourage us with all kinds of advice. While a therapist can offer a safe space to feel heard, and lead you down the path to figure it out for yourself

Characteristics of a healthy personality

Personality development is like the growth of a tree. Personality disorders have stunted tree growth.

Two types of narcissists:

Overt → Grandiose (aka Miranda Presley from the Devil Wears Prada)

Covert → people who use their power in a less obvious wayExpects everyone to cater to their needs

Main characteristics of narcissists:

Use other people to get their needs met because they don’t know who they are (personality deficit)

Believe their feelings are the same as facts

See people and situations (often you) in extremes; there is no middle ground. May be inflexible and only want things one way.

Shows no ability to empathize with your feelings or the impact of their behavior on you (or your children). May constantly attack and blame you.

May be able to hide these behaviors, so that only you experience them (gas-lighting)

Examples of Narcissistic Abuse / Injury → and her examples from the Gilmore Girls that illustrate this

Narcissistic parents are often highly competitive with their children

Codependent Behavior

You can grow up in an ‘alcoholic home’ without alcohol being present. The drug could be someone’s mood/behavior.

The values you learn from your family about love, affection, money, praise, punishment, celebration, etc. form our “normal”

Therapy helps you identify these patterns, problem solve, and cultivate healthy ways to cope & live in the present moment

How to cultivate a greater awareness of identifying our emotional triggers

Expanding the words we use to describe our feelings (check out the feeling wheel)

Arriving at acceptance (more than just “it is what it is”) → it means not fighting reality. It does not mean you have to like or condone the situation.