Số Lượng Truy Cập

Kỹ Năng Giao Tiếp

Communication
channels carrying messages from the sender to the receiver mainly exist under
direct forms, indirect forms, context and some other elements. Direct
communication relies on words, written forms, spoken forms, facial expressions,
controlled body movements, color, and sound. Indirect communication relies on
body language that may reveal one's true emotions.Context includes present or past events that form
the meaning of the message. Other relevant elements are physical milieu (the
season or weather, locations and environment), situational milieu (classroom,
conflict, supermarket checkout), cultural and linguistic backgrounds, emotional
state (maturity), complementary or contrasting roles (boss & employee;
teacher & student; friend or enemy; partner or competitor),

2. Principles
of effective interpersonal communication

1. Keep a
positive attitude: I believe that
attitude decides success or failure in communication. Your attitude, perspective
and feeling about yourself and other people motivate your priorities, doings,
behavior and values with other people and yourself. So, constant kindness can
accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding,
mistrust and hostility to evaporate.2. Actually be interested in others:
it is better for you to make more friends in two months by becoming really
interested in other people instead of spending two years trying to get them
interested in you.

3. Treat others as you want to be treated:
don’t use your energy to hurt others.
We should use it to spread our gentleness and kindness to everybody. Our
attitude, thoughts, feelings, hands, eyes, posture, words and body language are
all important in communication. Remember that words only seize 7 percent of
communication. The attitude behind your words is crucial.

4. Use silence: a good word is an easy obligation, but not to speak
ill requires only our silence. Be silent, or say something better than silence.

5. Listen and do not interrupt others: by not interrupting others and focusing our
attention on their words, our conversations become more interesting and useful.
Nature gives us one tongue and two ears to listen more than speak. The less you
speak, the more you will hear. By listening carefully, we learn many things. Listen
to criticism if you need to explore and change yourself. If the criticism is
true, correct yourself; if it is a lie, laugh at it.

6. Have the right to pass: we have the right to do or not to do something.
Trying to change others seems not very loving and impossible. When others try
to change us, we may also feel uncomfortable. Take responsibility for our
choices and actions without blaming for any reasons.

7. Do not volunteer others: recognize others have the right to choose and not to
use our language in the way we expected.

8. Speak only for ourselves. (Use 'I'
statements): it means making
accurate statements in communication - instead of assuming we can speak for
others, we only speak for ourselves. This diminishes unnecessary resentment and
resistance towards us.

9. Don’t babble on and on: the less people speak of their greatness, the more
we think of it. The more you say, the less people remember. In addition, the
opportunity for learning and creativity come from listening to others' ideas, not
from our talkativeness. If you must judge or criticize another person, say
nothing about him but merely say something about our own need for being
criticized.

10. Communicate with more than your
words: words seize a small part of
communication. Your tone and body language convey over 90 percent of what you
mean. People may forget your words, but they never forget how you made them
feel. Speak with your language body. People often turn down an idea because of
the unsympathetic voice tone.11. Challenge the behavior and not the
person: a difficult communicative situation is an opportunity for learning
and creativity rather than a personal 'battle'. Use a more effective approach
to communicate, remove unnecessary personal labels and destructive comments, focus
on the issue, and make creative responses to difficult situations.

12. Respect confidentiality: it means generating a feeling of trust, safety and in
communication, acknowledging and respecting their vulnerability if it is
related to the discussed issue.

13. It is ok to make mistakes: acknowledging that we are not robots and that
mistakes are opportunities for learning, connection and insight rather than
opportunities to condemn another - as if we are ourselves 'perfect'.

3. Personal
relationships and social pragmatics

Long-term
relationships are based on mutuality and relative equality, similarities in
social perception and communication development. These elements create interpersonal
attraction, satisfaction and long-term relationship maintenance. Relationship
problems appear because of various causes, but only some which are related to deficiencies
in behavior.

Pragmatics
assumes that reality is socially constructed via communication, and contexts cause
interpersonal difficulties pragmatically. Therefore, if you want to
achieve happiness and success at work, you need to get along with your
co-workers with whom you may even spend more time than with your relatives.
Each individual in an organization is like a small cog in a big wheel. Without
the assistance of your co-workers, your assignments will get more difficult. So,
the first thing is accepting others’ uniqueness and idiosyncrasies. Human
beings may be different in everything such as family background, education, origins,
races, genders, and ages, but they may all want the same things: safe living-places
and good employments. If you discriminate a co-worker because of their different
traits, I do not try to change your mind, but if wanting to succeed at work,
you had better consider the above things.

The
difficulty in dealing with employees comes from differences in emotional
maturity, intelligence, and level of dedication to the job. Emotionally
immature people may not cooperate with you because they feel threatened or
possibly lose their job security if they reveal you aspects of their job
function. Other people fail to accept criticism require the company to provide
them the easiest working conditions. In fact, emotional maturity is one of the
most difficult things to attain. Moreover, dealing with co-workers of poor
working qualification is not easy. Sometimes, people pretend ignorant to avoid
work, responsibility or unsuitable job positions. You may find your life
meaningful though working; professionalism and career pride may be important to
you. However, other people may work for money. To gain happiness and success at
work, you probably have to accept those with diverse personalities. You need to
form good relationships with those you need to perform your tasks. The best way
is to care about them, chat with them and learn about their concerns. Approach
them with an optimistic attitude, praise, and compliments. People gravitate
towards those that make them feel good. Let them know that you are not a threat.
Do not criticize them, or threaten their job security. Help them understand
that cooperation is mutually advantageous and supporting each other leads to mutual
success at work.

4. Social
skill suggestions

Communication
is primarily developed through learning. It is dependent on the situation you
are in. The various aspects of your personality, past experiences, what you see
in the other person and the impression you leave will influence communication.
A person’s behavior is also affected by what culture and particular social
group he belongs to. Thus, communicative skills are further helped to conjure
positive reaction from the receiver. Encouraging reactions such as being
pleased, intrigued, calmed, and motivated leads to increased self-worth and self-esteem.
It needs appropriate timing, interaction and reciprocity of specific behaviors.

Communicative
skill also increases due to factors: age, gender, status, and environment. Verbal
communication includes making small talks, sharing jokes, and discussing ideas.
Nonverbal communication includes active listening and body language. It is done
by exchanging messages with gestures, posture, facial expressions, eye contact,
and sign language. Some people behave poorly because of failure to take learning
opportunities and control emotional disturbances. Poor social skills often lead
to isolation, loneliness, rejection and poor self-esteem. They may cause depression,
anxiety, sexual dysfunction, aggression and even attempts at suicide. The
causes of poor social skills vary from person to person, and situation to
situation.

The
appropriate skills consist of the ability to organize cognition and behavior
toward socially accepted communicative goals, and the ability to continually
assess and modify behavior to maximize the chances of accomplishing particular
goals. Following are suggestions for establishing and maintaining social
relationships:

Be aware of others’
personal space and learn not to invade it.

Practise making eye
contact during conversations.

Keep turn-taking in
conversations, don’t monopolize the discussion.

Commit important
dates, information and tasks to written calendars and lists to avoid
disappointing others and giving an impression of not caring.

Ask family and
friends to point out inappropriate social conduct and discuss ways to
effect change.

Use visual
cues--such as a piece of everyday jewelry--as a reminder to engage in
social skills that require conscious effort.

Think twice before
speaking to avoid inappropriate comments.

Manage stress by maintaining
emotional control and healthy sleep habits, eating a balanced and
nutritious diet, engaging in daily exercises, practising how to interact
in various social situations, either by yourself or with someone else, and
utilizing encouraging phrase like"how interesting," when stress prohibits more detailed
conversation.

Last
of all, in immediate conversations, body language attracts interlocutors’ attentiveness.
Empathy is vital. Culture at work affects the success in communication and cooperation.

Underpromise and
overdeliver. To please clients, beginner consultants promise much, then break
their promises. Build internal support since it is critical to success.
The first step is defining key subjects and their roles. This makes your
project smooth and effective.

Manage expectations
as well as deadlines. Your job is to warn your client before they feel the
effect. You can feel the problem by listening and giving your clients and relevant
parties the time and space of the incident.

Good consultants must
be active listeners. Establishing a stronger rapport and listening help
you offer better counsel and make stronger decisions.

Actions speak
louder than words. Think carefully about the implicit messages you send
and help your clients to do the same.

Identify the needs
and concerns of target audiences, and the right media to use before
communicating. Communication is a process. Most organizations see it part
of their business plans. However, many still consider it as a one-time
event rather than ongoing dialogues.

For
beginner consultants, the best advice is to keep reading, learning and enriching
their experience.