I just think, ‘Wow, I’ve worked so hard for this, but what are you doing other than sitting there behind your computers and talking shit about people?’ If people don’t like me, fine, but don’t dis people if you’re not getting off your ass and doing something about your own life.

That’s so true, dear. We can’t all share our vapid, inarticulate opinions with a newspaper. Some of have to do it online.

Because if I can’t blog about the retarded shit celebs did today, the terrorists have already won.

David Spade and Heather Locklear are dunzo; her latest boy-toy is a Colorado realtor with a striking resemblance to Joe Simpson. But I adore her, so I’m setting down my bat and walking away from the soft ball.

Sean “Puff Daddy/P. Diddy/Diddy” Combs has to ditch the “Diddy” in Britain after a music producer there sues him over the name.

Dana Plato’s son files a wrongful death suit againt the Diff’rent Strokes star’s former fiance. Time to update that True Hollywood Story, E!

Black Eyed Peas singer Stacy “Fergie” Ferguson reluctantly admits to being on meth and Kids Incorporated. I’m pretty sure I know which one is more damaging to her image.