I'm fairly disappointed. (as always, short content for TL;DR'ers at the end)

In 2013, I told my parents how I decided that I needed to build a new PC. They advised me to have a laptop instead because I can take it anywhere I go. I agreed and we bought a 2012 Fujitsu A512, which is now my brother's laptop.

In 2015, when I was in 7th grade, my parents promised me a new PC if my GPA is 4.75 or higher. I studied and basically improved in grades a lot compared to 6th grade. My parents were amazed. No new PC, still. I had an R7 250 + AMD A4-6300 machine in mind with 4 GB of DDR3 RAM - something I considered "high end" because it was sooo superior to the laptop I already had (still on the A512 until July).

In the first half of 2016 (8th grade), my parents promised me the new PC if my GPA was just as good as the one last year. It was even better, actually. 4.85But still, no new PC! Then I had an Nvidia GT 730 in mind, then the RX 460 as the year was ending.

In 9th grade, they promised me (and swore to God, which is a HUGE deal here) that they would buy the new parts if my GPA was 5 point FREAKING 0. I was surprised and a bit overwhelmed at first, but as soon as the second semester came in, things were easy as cake and I knew I'll have that sweet, perfect GPA of 5.0. And I did. My mum cried when she saw the grades report and nothing but 5's (A's) on it. "General success - excellent (average 5.0)"I was even part of the "School's Pride" group of students.Guess what. Nothing happened. However, I did collect about 70% of the budget for the PC, even after my parents "borrowed" half of my money that year.

In my 1st year of high school and first semester, my parents promised me the new PC if my GPA is at least 4.5 (which is the lower limit for the "excellent" status).

And I did. I even did a bit better, with a GPA of 4.57. I mean, it's high school, of course they were expecting me to drop in grades like this.

And then, I had about 90% of the budget and I decided to buy whatever percentage of the parts I can, but then... they borrowed yet another 200 KM from me.

And then my aunt came to a visit and mentioned me that I'll get a PC for free which she bought in 2012 for 2000 KM (1000â‚¬). I was super excited, thinking it would have a GTX 660 and an Intel Core i5 4th gen CPU.But, instead it was an HP Compaq dc7600C Convertible Minitower equipped with a Pentium 4 640, Ati Radeon X1050/600/300 (one of those), 512MB RAM and a whopping 80GB Western Digital hard drive. It also has 2 DVD drives and a floppy drive.

Turns out someone posted the article on Pik (take it as a Bosnian eBay) back in the day and wrote the original price from the time the PC was manufactured (2005).

I seriously need to do something as I keep getting more excited and excited every time they mention the new PC, and then I get disappointed because it never happens. I'm convinced it's my own fault because I hardly ever speak to my parents about the PC, because I believe I'd annoy them that way. Oh boy, that needs to change.

Also, don't post "Get a job" because it's not going to help. I collect and save money over the years, and for all these 5 years of waiting and getting money for my new PC, my parents just "borrowed" (more like took) most of it.

At the moment, I have a bit more than 700 KM, which should be enough for the CPU and the GPU, though I'd rather wait and buy the GPU much later, since there was a jump in prices recently. I guess I could get the processor for 360 KM, the PSU for 60-80, the motherboard for 230 KM I believe, and let my parents "borrow" the rest of the money there's left.

Of course, I know that my parents will pay their little debt off someday. I can understand their situation right now. They have their own needs and problems. I'm not mad or anything, but I consider this a bit unfair.

Though, at they don't owe me nearly as much as they used to. I mean, it's just 300 KM, I'm sure they will return it someday. I just don't like this concept of an "ATM machine son" which I'm currently being treated as. I'm wondering if I should just stop letting them borrow money from me because when they do, it's quite literally always at the worst possible moment.

sighMy Nazi classmate was right. I should've taken most of the PC right when I collected 90% of the budget, and then collect some more and buy the remaining part or two... I had a chance, but I missed it just because my parents asked me "Isn't it too early to get one, though?"

And then my dad believes it's not worth spending money on new computer cases. He surely knows about computer hardware, but nothing past 2007, LOL. He believes there's also no need to get a PSU since it already comes with the case. Pfft. Be glad I'm not applying interest rates for your credit.

Oh well, I guess I should be more of a rebel next time I have the chance. My passiveness ruined a lot of chances I had before. Only now it started to hurt.Worst of all, my parents just keep asking me "Why not a laptop instead of a desktop computer?" BECAUSE A LAPTOP WITH THE SAME SPECS WILL COST 2.5X MORE THAN THE DESKTOP PC IN THIS SHITHOLE OF A COUNTRY AND FOR THE SAME PRICE THE LAPTOP WOULD HAVE 33% OF THE PERFORMANCE THE PC CAN HAVE and I don't need that much power while I'm on the move. A PC is also more upgradeable than a laptop and modern laptops tend to break after a few years, unlike my trusty, 11-year-old Fujitsu S7210.

(sorry for all-caps, that question just drives me crazy. I'm going to tell the same answer but in a very calm tone if my parents ask me that)

Well, I guess I'll just sleep now. I wrote more than enough already. Oh hey, TL;DR:

I've been waiting to build my 'dream' PC for 5 years already

my parents have promised it 4 times (2 of which had relatively extreme conditions, like getting absolutely perfect grades), broke the promise every time

I've collected enough money, but didn't buy the PC when I should've, as my parents asked me if it's too early to buy it

over the next few months, my parents treated me as a living ATM machine

my aunt gives me her HP Compaq dc7600 for free, but having told me it's from 2012 and that it costed 2000 KM back then

I'm quite disappointed because I didn't buy the PC on time (and by my aunt's PC, but I can't blame her, as she wasted lots of money on a somewhat worthless rustbucket and didn't know) and now I'm looking forward to change from passive to active mode

Worst of all, the computer's graphics card is pretty much dying, as there are visual artifacts on the screen before freezing the computer.Lol, I guess I should ask my classmate to give me some of that DDR2 RAM he saved from his old PC, and that Ati Radeon HD 3650 which he also had (pfft, now he's got a GTX 1060 3GB + AMD R5 1500X PC, so he doesn't care).2018 started in an interesting way. We'll see how it goes.

I'm just afraid the HD 3650 won't work well with it. Eh, it's good to have it around, in any case. Alternatively, I'll probably get a low-end Nvidia GT 610 or 710 because that's all this thing needs. A nice, little GPU which doesn't need a great PSU. x3

High school. I can't believe that I've lived up to go to high school.I cannot express this specific feeling of repetition. And there's more than that.TL;DR at the bottom. c:

This year, I finished 9th grade, thus completing elementary school. I was very surprised that I even managed to conclude maths with an A, something I've never done since, uhh... 3rd grade?

And the summer felt like forever. Except it wouldn't last forever. My summer break ended on the 5th of September (it would've been the 1st of September if it hadn't been for a Muslim holiday here).

Two days, or one day before it started, I had posted a journal which, kind of, implied that I was going through a middle-age crisis.I felt terrible, I thought that the next day would mean the end of the world.

But no! It all turned out juuuust fine. I was extremely nervous and my heart was beating very fast. I got to the school, they were calling out each student to sort them out in classes/groups/whatever.

And I barely heard my name, but it was fairly different from all the other names (especially since my surname doesn't end with that typical -iÄ‡, or -oviÄ‡), so I knew it was me.My class and I went to the classroom, and we were asked some questions (personal info) by our class teacher. For every word I spoke, my stress levels would've increased.

The class was over after that and then we exited the school. My mum was waiting for me and I said "I survived!". Man, what a relief.

And now, this electro-techhical high school became very normal to me. I don't perceive it as a thing which came from outer space any more. It's a school just like any other.

Though, I chose this high school because it had so many good things about it. For example:

More I.T.-related subjects/classes

More technical classes

No biology, no music class, no geography!

(I like making music, but learning and revising about the same composers and time periods for years is boring, plus we don't learn how to compose music at all here)

"Practical" class (or practice class). This is where we literally apply our knowledge about tech and stuff.

Frickin' programming starts in the 2nd year/grade! I can wait, I'm patient. :3 (t.b.h. I can hardly force-start myself to learn the basics of programming at the moment, I'm stuck on other projects)

We'll have history and physics for the first 2 years, and no more. There's also chemistry, but only in the first year. Good thing we don't have Latin. I'd not like to learn a 'dead' language. But I have to admit, Latin is cool.

Another thing I'd like to point out, while we're at languages: I've switched from Turkish to German. FINALLY! Now I'll start learning that language. xDI know it means learning a whole new language from the start. I do know a couple of things in German. I'm usually good at learning languages.

Let's just hope that the teacher won't make references to Nazis. One of my friends from elementary school told me that their German teacher often makes funny references to Nazis. Lol.

As much as it can be, this is an excellent high school and I totally don't regret signing up there. Now if we only had game modding, or something, as a class...

Hmm, this thing bothers me:A day before high school started, I had imagined a conversation with a girl in the class. I didn't know any of my classmates, so I just imagined someone and considered her as my classmate. And she was a gamer.

The weird thing is, a few days later, I found out that there's a girl gamer in my class. Wow. I've made her laugh a lot of times, I'll have to say that. :3She plays CS:GO and LoL if you really want to know. Not really the type of games I'd play (CS:GO is basically a competitive skin fest, I don't play those. Besides, I suck at multiplayer FPS'es).

What an interesting coincidence, though!

I may miss my old friends from elementary school, but I certainly appreciate the new classmates. They're all calm during the class, nice to talk to and they found me somewhat interesting, so an occasional question sometimes gets directed to me.

TL;DRI have my middle-age crisis before high school begins, because I believed that I haven't done enough during the summer break.When I start going to high school, everything turns normal, and everything goes on as usual.It's the same cycle that went on for years. When I finished 8th grade, I wasn't fine with 9th grade starting. I thought it would be the end of the world, but, just like with high school, everything was normal.

I decided to clean it, so I found a screwdriver which came with my mBot, so I can unscrew the screws and take off the cover.

I'm surprised that the main fan is still working.

I couldn't wait to take out the fan and give it a good clean, but:

The bottom-left screw doesn't look good. Looks like its previous owner tried to unscrew this one but he ended up damaging it. :/

Well, I've had an interesting experience, lol.I wonder what this is:

Lastly, I think that upgrading RAM here won't be that easy:

There are 2 RAM sticks in the laptop, 1GB each.One has this yellow, translucent tape on one corner while the top one is completely removable. So, I should get a module of 3GB DDR2 RAM, which obviously doesn't exist anywhere in my country. I can, of course, buy a 2GB RAM module, but then my total memory would be 3GB.

Ah well, better something than nothing.

Also, I located the hard disk on my laptop. I don't have a picture of it right now, but it's not that necessary and I don't want to take my laptop apart while it's running. Actually, I might just do that.

flips laptop

Alright, I got it:

Don't bash me for doing this, I was very careful while doing that!So yeah, I think I could get a 300GB laptop hard drive and replace the old one, couldn't I?

Now I'm wondering, how can I unscrew that damaged screw?There's the rubber band method, but I don't have any rubber bands that are wide enough. There's the pliers method, but I wouldn't want my dad to know about this. Any suggestions? xd

I became friends with a furry on Discord. He's so nice to talk to, lol. (extremely nice according to my liking)

Probably because he's the only one I know who's interested in my stories about Jody. Oh, very interested, indeed. Maybe a bit too interested.He has told me that I was cute (two times, actually, it brought up a smile on my face :D, because only 3 people (incl. him) have told me that).

On the other side, though, he's looking for a boyfriend and really likes me.gg wp Admer XD

But hey, I can withstand all of it, I guess.No regrets for meeting him! Well, I maybe regret it because he showed me a bunch of furry porn. No regrets, still!!! >:D

The first 30 seconds or so are simply silent because I planned to add some music there, but meh. xdThis is one of the bigger reasons why I love school. I tried to listen and put subtitles and translate this stuff, but sometimes, it was so muffled and non-comprehensive that I couldn't understand what we were saying.

In the video, you can see characters like Roki (yeah, that guy who will be in Quest For Burek; the guy who got trapped under the chairs and played the guitar) and Enis (the "Bosnian gopnik").

I'm very curious about what you have to say about this little compilation by me. (I had also planned to include the part where one classmate punches the Qur'an a couple of times and kicks it, sheesh, but that wouldn't be received well xD)

Edit #1: 24 June 2017; Reason: Changed the first sentence, hoping the journal would get some attention.

I was very curious about this, so I decided to dig into my old pictures.It's a part of my personal history. I've talked about it a lot of times. But I wasn't really sure if that's how it really happened.

Let's see what happened to my old PC (R.I.P., my old friend), and how on Earth did my brother "steal" the laptop from me?

22nd of July, 2014.A few days after my old PC's death.

A month before that, my parents bought me a laptop. I wanted to build a "gaming rig" (hehehehe, there was an AMD Radeon HD 6450 on that part list, once), but they bought me a laptop instead. It's actually a good decision, considering what I'll probably get this summer.

And as you can see, that PC in the picture is the dead corpse of my old PC. It had 2GB of DDR2 RAM, an Ati Radeon HD 4650 (which served me well, by the way), and a dual-core Pentium processor @ 2.4GHz.

It also had a Hitachi 300GB HDD:

For some reason, there's duct tape lying on the Ati graphics card:

Weird.

Its life came to an end during the time I was staying at my other grandparents'. Basically, I brought my recently-bought laptop and my brother used the PC I left him at home.It was inevitable. He was playing Roblox one night and there was a thunderstorm outside. That's at least my assumption. He then continued playing and then there was a strike, and the components got fried.

Sad, isn't it? When I returned, I was shocked and angry at my brother.

We took the computer to a local PC fixer in Stolac (my nearby town), and we traded. He got whatever was left of the PC (actually, only the graphics card got fried), and we got this 2007 Fujitsu Computers Siemens Lifebook S Series S7120. Fujitsu S7120 for short. That's the one I use now.

So, my brother used that one, probably as a punishment for not taking any care about my PC, and I still used the newer laptop.

(taken in 2015)Oh, what a cutie. He played DooM when he was 5. :]

This is us playing Multi Theft Auto: San Andreas in my room:

21st of September, 2014.Oh, the good, old days when he listened to me and wasn't so stubborn. :]Now I realised that he was so young back then...

But in those pictures, he's using the older laptop! How come he's now using the newer one!?

Well... it all came down to this:

9th of July 2015.

As you can see, I'm in a different house in that picture. Precisely, at my grandparents (and that monitor in the background belongs to a PC which has an AMD Athlon processor, and a low-end, integrated GPU).

What does that mean, then? You can clearly see that I had the older laptop. My brother was using the newer laptop. During that time, he must've gotten attached to its performance, so he noticed the difference between the 2 laptops.

What a bad move, seriously. I don't know why it happened. I really don't know. Maybe my parents told me to leave the laptop to my brother, who knows. xd

And if you're wondering, no, this one happened after my PC had died. My PC died in 2014, while this one happened in 2015. Take a look at those dates I wrote up there...

There. That's why I'm now forced to use this trashy laptop:

But I'll build a new PC this summer! HA-HA! But if I do the same mistakes as I had done them in 2015, then I'm screwed.

Also, R.I.P. my previous journal. It had reached a staggering amount of 181 comments and it shall be memorised as one of those journals which deserve to rest eternally, in the TWHL hall of fame. Rest in pepperoni.

For me, the semester ends by the end of May. Finally...So, let's see how I'm doing, regarding the subjects:

Bosnian - One test left (will be an A)English - One test left (will be an A, too)Turkish - AMaths - APhysics - ABiology - One report left (will be an A)Chemistry - One presentation left (will be an A)History - AGeography - A (at least I think so, I might have an oral exam left)P.E. - A (lol, everyone's got an A in P.E. this year)Art Class - ATech Class - AMusic Class - Composition recognition test left (will be an A, hopefully)Islam Class - A

So, it's been 9 years, and I'm finally going to finish elementary school.Then I'll go to high school, uh-oh.

Man, time flies fast, doesn't it? I mean, I remember thinking about this moment when I was in 6th, 7th and 8th grade. I knew it was going to happen and it's apparently going to happen.

Also, there isn't much left, seriously. We'll have an excursion to Montenegro from the 17th to the 19th of May and then a prom at the 26th of May, so that is 3 days less to count. In short, it's just 6 days left minus the weekends and those events.

And I'm so happy because of it. This summer, lots of stuff will happen (I hope), including:

Buying and building that dream PC

Opening a bank account

My cousins from the USA will come and stay here for a month or two (and they haven't been here since 2011)

Looks like the patience will finally pay off. :]

But after that becomes history, I'll be worried. Because I'll have to decide which high school to sign up. I have 2 options: the general high school in Stolac (my town) and the electro-technical high school in Mostar.

Since at least 2 of my classmates will also sign up for the ETS in Mostar, I'm encouraged to sign up there, too. We won't have stupid classes like biology, geography, chemistry, music class etc. NO! We will have stuff related to I.T, tech and robots.

The only 2 downsides, perhaps, will be the fact that I'll have to take the bus early in the morning every day and I'll have to buy my own food (whereas here I carry some snacks into school from home). Bummer. But I'll not let those 2 silly reasons stop me from studying what I love.

This year is so good, I love it!

Edit:Alright, adding some context for that "This year is so good" sentence...

So, this year I was gifted some more games on Steam. Some people who buy games on a regular basis have no idea how meaningful this is to me.Then, a moderator from a Far Cry modding site sent me a PM, offering me some spare parts. I told him that we'd talk about that in summer.And, the most recent addition to the kindness of others towards me was an admin from another modding site saying he'd give me a copy of Windows when I build my dream PC. Wow, I'm so lucky, aren't I?

Well, I'll certainly have to take those offers with a grain of salt, because you never know whether they really mean it or not.

I'm not sure if this is so, but I've always been nice to other people on the Internet (I can only recall swearing and behaving badly 5 or so times). I think that me being nice fired back on me, lol. I'm glad if it is. Karma, I think that's the word for it.

Next, I've started socialising a bit with my classmates. I talk more with them, and we laugh at stuff and sing Serbian war songs during the breaks.My social situation is much better compared to what it was 1.5 years ago.

So yeah, this year is so good, it's even the best one in my life for now. I love it!