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Jews Are Ugly Slobs

Here's Gwyneth Paltrow discussing her physical "transformation" in "The Good Night": …as Dora, the protagonist’s waking-life girlfriend, Gwyneth is barely recognizable: pale, with a cape of dense brown hair, bundled in shapeless cardigans. “It was me physicalizing my New York … Read More

…as Dora, the protagonist’s waking-life girlfriend, Gwyneth is barely recognizable: pale, with a cape of dense brown hair, bundled in shapeless cardigans. “It was me physicalizing my New York Jewish half,” jokes Gwyneth. (Her rep as a shiksa goddess notwithstanding, the actress is in fact, as a friend likes to call her, “Gwyneth Paltrow, the descendant of ancient rabbis.”)

I won't get into the absurdity of an actress sans eyeliner being labeled "barely recognizable." And "descendant of ancient rabbis" sounds a lil' nebulous. I mean, shit: aren't we all? But whatever. She's clearly Jewish enough for Hitler, and that, friends, means she's Jewish enough for me.

Question is, does dressing down and attaining moderate fugliness make one feel more Jewish? Or just look more Jewish? I suppose it's a method issue.