Spotlight Series: Two Dads Dell and Robert

Modern Family Surrogacy proudly supports the LGBT community in their surrogacy journey to parenthood.

The Next Family:How did you start your family?

Dell:We were actually together almost 4 years before we got a phone call one morning from Robert’s mother. She expressed that she was ready to be a grandmother. She said she didn’t know how or what we had to do, but she wanted a grandchild. We were both caught off guard, but we decided then it had to happen and ultimately decided on surrogacy. We pretty much handled the surrogacy on our own. We did all the research from how it works to where to locate a surrogate. We ultimately used an online site which was setup much like an open forum with discussion boards to find our surrogate. At the time, we were concerned about how an agency would perceive our relationship and how that would affect the process as a whole. We felt it would be best to do as much we could without any obstacles.

Angela was a part of the discussion board site we were on and we approached her. We had several lunches and dinners, cookouts and meet-ups, and we finally agreed on proceeding with the process of surrogacy.

The Next Family: How did you two meet?

Dell:Contrary to popular belief…our story is a real-life fairy tale. We meet online through the once popular AOL chat room. After chatting for a day or two we decided to meet at our local mall…we both had heard the crazy online stories, so we agreed upon a public place. We meet on a Tuesday, talked over the phone that Wednesday, met family that Friday, made it official that Saturday, October 2nd 2004! So, it’s safe to say, it was love at first sight.

The Next Family: Did you always want to have kids?

Dell:In the beginning phases of our relationship, we had several talks and discussions about expanding our family. Kids had always been a mutual desire. Initially we wanted five but after the birth of our daughter we had a change of heart…maybe one more in the near future.

The Next Family:Where do you live?

Dell:We currently reside in Chattanooga, TN.

The Next Family:What is the greatest (and the toughest) thing about being a parent?

Dell:To us, one of the greatest things about being parents is hearing our daughter tell us “Poppo… Daddy…you’re the best. The toughest part is watching out little baby girl grow into a little lady…so quickly!

The Next Family: Does your family feel adversity?

Dell:Fortunately, as a family we have not had to face any adversity. However, at the very beginning of our surrogacy journey, we were contacted by an African-American woman who was having a tumultuous time with the father of her unborn child. The father of the child told her to have an abortion and she didn’t want to go through with it. She reached out to us based on our ad on a website for surrogacy interests and we got truly excited, to say the least. We felt it was a blessing not only for us but for the child whom may not have had a chance at life in any other case. Long story short, the mother told the father what she planned to do and he was totally against it and stated he would rather terminate the pregnancy than have his child raised by two gay, black dudes.

We were in talks with several other surrogates of other ethnic communities and we never experienced any kind of backlash or discrimination. It was only from our own African-American community that we experienced negativity. We finally realized, the hard way, this sort of thing just doesn’t happen in our own community. To this day, we still get “looks” and “questions”. However, the good has always out-weighed the bad.

The Next Family:Do you have any advice for LGBTQ youth?

Dell:The advice we would give to any young person is to follow their dreams and never allow anything or anyone to stop them. As it relates specifically to the LGBTQ youth, we would advise them to never allow their sexuality to define them as a person, one’s sexuality and gender identity is just a microcosm of one’s overall character and purpose.

The Next Family:What’s one life lesson you want to teach your children?

Dell: We make it a point to teach our daughter the true meaning of love; love has no gender, love has no color, love has no sexual orientation. Love is simply LOVE, without all of the stipulations.

Modern Family Surrogacy has helped many LGBT couples/singles in creating their families through surrogacy. We’ll guide you along each step of your journey, from your first encounter with us, through the fertility process, to the delivery of your Little Bundle of Joy and beyond.