Monday, April 18, 2011

I cannot stress enough the importance of good underwear. One morning you are going to wake up and realize that the only thing getting you out of bed is the fact that you have to pee. It is at this point that you will realize how valuable your collection of underwear is because despite how non-existent your love life is, how mind-numbing your daily routine is, or how disproportionate your breasts are, damn you look amazing in that underwear (btw my breast are perfectly proportionate).

So here is a little lesson in underwear: If you are well endowed do not even waste your time with anything but a thong. All of that fabric is just going to end up in between your bountiful buns so why not have a little ribbon instead of your grandma's clothesline up in there.