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Thanks to Nathan from Lava Row, Social Media Genius

I hadn’t really paid too much attention to the bidding process until today. I have a store to run and kids to raise. And I figured it was a done deal…who could turn down the financial benefits of the US hosting the World Cup? I can’t say I was too happy about it. I go to the World Cup to see the world, not a bunch of stadiums I already go to. I was grumbling about how lame it would be…traveling around in a rented RV or something.

Then today people started talking about Qatar possibly having the votes, and my US Soccer pride kicked in as fast as you can say “Do they even serve alcohol in Qatar?” FIFA, are we really going to say, in the age of global warming, that it’s OK to air condition entire fields and fan viewing areas? A World Cup in the middle of a dry dessert….OK, it’s funny to say that now, but trust me, no one actually wants to do that. And I know this is on a personal note, but Qatar hosting means I’ll hear years of Brock Kwiatkowsky calling it “Cutter.” You’ll have to trust me, FIFA. The answer to the Qatar question is “seek happiness elsewhere.”

The US should host the World Cup. I am a soccer fan because the cup was here in 1994. I had been to one game in 1993 and then slammed right into the 1994 World Cup games in Chicago. I thought it was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen, and I never wanted to miss another World Cup, and so far, I haven’t. I pray that in the next 12 years, America figures out that soccer is the greatest sport in the world, and we won’t need hosting to convert the masses, but just in case…let the US host and I’ll gladly spend all summer converting ordinary Americans into Ultra Fans.

We have huge stadiums that will sell out. We have the hotels. Not the “Love Hotels” like in Korea…real hotels in every price range. And we have lots and lots of people who want to see World Cup soccer. Remember South Africa? I was looking forward to a nice, intimate group of Americans, but noooo….we were the second highest attended national after South Africa. Those people and many, many more will flood stadiums across the US.

It will be epic. Americans will embrace soccer wholeheartedly. Brad Janovich will no longer be so misunderstood. US Soccer will have to institute a ticketing ranking system to ensure that the people who have followed them all over the world for the previous 28 years will be guaranteed tickets (you guys taking notes on this?) In short, it will be what we soccer fans have waited for, soccer hitting the tipping point in America’s mainstream.

So now, six and a half hours from the decision. I’m going to try (finally) to get some sleep. But I’ll have dreams of Sepp Blatter announcing “and in 2022, the FIFA World Cup goes to……the United States of America. GO USA BID.