Straight Talk About Mental illness: Information for Siblings

Summary: About 1 in 5 young people experience a mental illness like anxiety or depression before their 18th birthday. You probably already know someone with mental illness, like a friend, classmate or even family member. When this happens, it can be hard to know what the right thing is to do or say. It can also be confusing if you don’t have a good understanding of mental illness.

About 1 in 5 young people experience a mental illness like anxiety or depression before their 18th birthday. Chances are you probably already know someone with mental illness, like a friend, classmate or teammate. Sometimes, it’s a brother or sister coping with a mental illness. When this happens, it can be hard to know what the right thing is to do or say. It can also be confusing if you don’t have a good understanding of mental illness. This information sheet should help answer some questions for you.

Ways to help your brother or sister

“Do’s”

Some things that could help:

Do be open and ask questions.

Do ask if you can help – your support can make a big difference!

Do be patient.

Do be respectful.

Do give your brother or sister space during a difficult time.

Do talk to people you can trust (friends, family members, a doctor or counselor).

Do ask your parents to give you information. Secrets can make everyone feel worse.

Do remember that when people have a mental illness, they don’t ‘feel like themselves’.

Don’t say things like “Just get over it!” Don’t think your brother or sister is behaving this way just to get attention

Don’t take outbursts personally

Don’t be afraid to let your parents know if your brother or sister does things that seem scary to you. It is okay to talk openly about your feelings. It may even be important information that your parents don’t already have, and may help them get the right help for your brother or sister.

Fast Facts

Between 10 – 20% of Canadian youth experience a mental illness at some point. It is the most common illness experienced by youth worldwide.

￼￼About 5% of males and 12% of females between the ages of 12 and 19 will have a major depression.

Stigma around mental illness is the biggest reason why youth don’t ask for help. Getting help early can prevent a lot of pain and suffering. Illnesses can also be easier to treat in the early stages.

Questions and Answers (Q & A)?

Many young people have questions when their brother or sister has a mental illness. We hope these answers will help.

Q: How did my brother or sister get a mental illness?

A: There are lots of different reasons why people get a mental illness. It is usually because of a few things happening all at the same time, instead of one single reason. Mental illness does run in families, so if a parent or close relative has a mental illness, there is a greater chance that other members of the family may experience mental illness. Difficult relationships with friends or parents or problems at school (like bullying) can also make things stressful for young people. With lots of stressors adding up, it is easy to see how a young person can become overwhelmed with their lives.

Q: Will I get a mental illness if my brother or sister has one?

A: Although having a brother or sister with a mental illness puts you at higher risk for developing a mental illness, it doesn’t mean that you will get one. What it does mean, is that you need to take care of yourself. If you start feeling sad or anxious or have other symptoms that are upsetting, you need to talk to someone you trust to help you figure out what is going on. We all have these feelings sometimes but if they continue for more than two weeks it is important to let someone know.

Q: My sister hurts herself on purpose. Why does she do this?

A: Sometimes people with mental illness are in such pain that they use unhealthy ways to cope. This can mean hurting themselves on purpose. The good news is that with the help and support of family, friends and professionals, they can find new healthier ways to manage their mental illness and difficult feelings. Even though it might be upsetting for you to know your sister hurts herself, try and be patient with her. Talk to someone you trust to discuss how you’re feeling about it.

Q: Why did my brother or sister have to go into the hospital?

A: Although it may seem like a pretty scary place to be, sometimes it is the best place for youth if they are not able to keep themselves safe. Having someone you care about in the hospital is never fun, but it can be even more upsetting for the families of young people admitted to a psychiatric unit. Just remember that the kids you may see on the unit are just like your brother or sister. They’re also trying to get better to go home to their family and friends. Try and be as supportive as possible to your brother at this time.

Q: Will my brother or sister be different once they are better?

A: We all change and grow over time, especially when we have had something important happen to us, like experiencing a mental illness. Even so, your brother or sister should mostly be the same as before they got sick. You might even notice positive changes. Youth can learn to cope with difficult situations by learning ways to better take care of themselves when things get tough.

Q: How long does mental illness last?

A: Having a mental illness is like having a cold – sometimes you begin to feel better quickly and other times it drags on much longer than you thought it would. Some people experience a mental illness only once in their lives and they never have it again. Others may experience several episodes during their life. It’s different for everyone.

About this Document

Written by Michel Poirier (social worker) and the Mental Health Information Team at the Children's Hospital of Eastern Ontario (CHEO).

Special thanks to the youth of Youth Net for their invaluable feedback and suggestions!

Disclaimer

Information in this pamphlet is offered ‘as is' and is meant only to provide general information that supplements, but does not replace the information from your health provider. Always contact a qualified health professional for further information in your specific situation or circumstance.

Creative Commons License

You are free to copy and distribute this material in its entirety as long as 1) this material is not used in any way that suggests we endorse you or your use of the material, 2) this material is not used for commercial purposes (non-commercial), 3) this material is not altered in any way (no derivative works). View full license athttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.5/ca/

Patient Handouts

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Workplace Accommodation

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Examples of Common Workplace Accommodations
Accommodations should be based on your needs and the employer’s resources. There is no standard list of reasonable accommodations, but here is a list of commonly provided workplace accommodations:
Job coach assistance in hiring and on the job mentoring as necessary. Job coach/mentor could be from an external agency or be f...

Accommodations should be based on your needs and the employer’s resources. There is no standard list of reasonable accommodations, but here is a list of commonly provided workplace accommodations:

Job coach assistance in hiring and on the job mentoring as necessary. Job coach/mentor could be from an external agency or be from within the organization.

Flexible scheduling to accommodate effects of medications, time for appointments, more frequent breaks, switch to temporary part-time hours without fear of losing job.

Changes in supervision, for example how feedback and instruction are given, or having weekly supervision appointments to check in and prevent problems before they can happen.

In training, allowing more time for tasks to be learned, or allowing for individualized, one-on-one training.

Appropriate technology like a tape recorder to tape instructions, head phones to block out loud noise, etc.

Modifying work space or changing location so it is quieter, fewer distractions; allowing an employee to work at home.

Allowing an employee to exchange minor job tasks with others.

Rights and Responsibilities of the Employer & Employee

The Employer Should:

Create and maintain an atmosphere where people feel comfortable asking for accommodation, including providing information about the organization’s policies and creating ways for requests to happen confidentially.

Assume that the employee’s request for accommodation is made in good faith.

In a timely manner, work with the employee (and a professional, if necessary), to explore all options for accommodation.

Maintain records of the request and steps taken to deal with the request.

Maintain and respect confidentiality issues.

Pay the cost of the accommodations, including fees for any medical certificates required.

Request only information that is directly related to developing an appropriate accommodation.

Ensure that managers and supervisory staff will not tolerate any discrimination or harassment as a result of an illness or an accommodation.

The Employee Should

Tell the employer you need an accommodation, due to a disability, and give them the information they need to understand what the limitations are and what accommodations would address them.

External Links

Building Mentally Healthy Workplaces: Perspectives of Canadian Workers and Front-Line Managers provides a national perspective from working Canadians on their work environment and the degree to which it supports their mental well-being. The report highlights the workplace challenges faced by employees with mental health issues, and provides insight into how employers can best support these employees.

A suicide prevention comic book created by the Healthy Aboriginal Network, a BC-incorporated non-profit society. It's the story of a teenager who is bullied at school, misunderstood by his teacher and feels socially isolated from his family. He finds one day very overwhelming and considers taking his own life. Youth find Darkness Calls non-threatening and relatable, so it's a terrific ice breaker to get them talking about how they feel.
Cost is contingent on amount ordered, please visit the website for more information.

Iris the Dragon is a charity which creates educational material for adults and young readers to help facilitate a conversation between parents, teachers and children about issues relating to mental health and wellness. Now approved by the Departments of Education for the Province of Manitoba and Nova Scotia as acceptable resource material for their mental health curriculum, Iris the Dragon's books address a variety of emotional, behavioural and neurodevelopmental conditions and recognize the importance of family, school, and community in promoting the potential of every child and youth, regardless of mental health challenge.

The KidsMatter Primary information resources, designed for parents/carers and school staff, contain detailed information on specific topics that fit within each of the four KidsMatter Primary components about children’s development and wellbeing. These resources are intended for use by adults. Click on the links below to go directly to the entire resource booklet for each component or to download specific information sheets.

Series of booklets which are aimed at raising awareness about the issue of "Mental Health at Work... From defining to Solving the Problem". Intended for everyone who wants to understand the issue and to become better equipped to prevent it. This series comes in the form of a kit made up of three booklets on the scope (Booklet1), causes (Booklet 2), and prevention (Booklet 3) of the problem.

Ottawa Public Health (OPH) has partnered with the Canadian Mental Health Association (CMHA), the Canadian Public Health Association (CPHA), Military Family Services (MFS), and the Mental Illness Caregivers Association (MICA) to develop a national resource for Canadian caregivers of children, youth, adults, and older adults facing mental illness or experiencing mental health challenges.

MindYourMind.ca is an award winning site for youth by youth. This is a place where you can get info, resources and the tools to help you manage stress, crisis and mental health problems. Share what you live and what you know with your friends.

MyHealth Magazine is a health and wellness program delivered through a series of interactive, online resources for young people (students.myhealthmagazine.net), educators (teachers.myhealthmagazine.net), and college students (college.myhealthmagazine.net).

The keys to taking care of youth mental health are to work towards building close and genuinely supportive relationships and promoting mental wellness, and to get help early should problems arise. This free guide was designed to help parents forge and strengthen those connections and support their youth's mental health.

OurHealthyMinds is about mental health. It celebrates the many ways we can be well, and honours the many ways we can experience mental illness - as an individual, a caregiver, a parent, a child or loved one.

Provides physical and mental health care to people (16+) who present for help for sexual assault and intimate partner violence. See website for other services provided including community education. more

Peer-run volunteer organization for individuals living with a mood disorder that provides resources, support groups, social and recreational activities for our members and their families and friends. more

Care Plan

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Clinical Practice Guidelines

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Workplace Accommodation

Add to Info Cart

Examples of Common Workplace Accommodations
Accommodations should be based on your needs and the employer’s resources. There is no standard list of reasonable accommodations, but here is a list of commonly provided workplace accommodations:
Job coach assistance in hiring and on the job mentoring as necessary. Job coach/mentor could be from an external agency or be f...

Accommodations should be based on your needs and the employer’s resources. There is no standard list of reasonable accommodations, but here is a list of commonly provided workplace accommodations:

Job coach assistance in hiring and on the job mentoring as necessary. Job coach/mentor could be from an external agency or be from within the organization.

Flexible scheduling to accommodate effects of medications, time for appointments, more frequent breaks, switch to temporary part-time hours without fear of losing job.

Changes in supervision, for example how feedback and instruction are given, or having weekly supervision appointments to check in and prevent problems before they can happen.

In training, allowing more time for tasks to be learned, or allowing for individualized, one-on-one training.

Appropriate technology like a tape recorder to tape instructions, head phones to block out loud noise, etc.

Modifying work space or changing location so it is quieter, fewer distractions; allowing an employee to work at home.

Allowing an employee to exchange minor job tasks with others.

Rights and Responsibilities of the Employer & Employee

The Employer Should:

Create and maintain an atmosphere where people feel comfortable asking for accommodation, including providing information about the organization’s policies and creating ways for requests to happen confidentially.

Assume that the employee’s request for accommodation is made in good faith.

In a timely manner, work with the employee (and a professional, if necessary), to explore all options for accommodation.

Maintain records of the request and steps taken to deal with the request.

Maintain and respect confidentiality issues.

Pay the cost of the accommodations, including fees for any medical certificates required.

Request only information that is directly related to developing an appropriate accommodation.

Ensure that managers and supervisory staff will not tolerate any discrimination or harassment as a result of an illness or an accommodation.

The Employee Should

Tell the employer you need an accommodation, due to a disability, and give them the information they need to understand what the limitations are and what accommodations would address them.