Things that Daddy is better at than me

What is it with kids?

I spend all day feeding them, dealing with their tantrums, wiping various sticky substances from their hands, mouths and bottoms, and basically making sure they don’t injure or kill themselves and yet when daddy gets home from work, it is like I don’t exist. Mummy who?

I’ll say now that my husband is a wonderful daddy. Perhaps even the best they’ll ever have. But it’s flipping ungrateful of them to overlook the fact that he might well forget to feed them anything but biscuits.

However, as much as I’d love to say that I am the best parent (of the two of us, not necessarily in the world) I have to concede that there are a number of things that daddy is far better at than I…

Playing

I confess, I am no good at playing. I try, I’m just not a natural and I really don’t enjoy it. I can sing and read stories, and I can’t wait until they’re older and we can do crafting and gardening and things that I actually quite enjoy. But sitting on the floor (uncomfortable, right?) playing Happyland, or jigsaws, or any number of games that no one apart from the toddler knows the rules to, is like having teeth pulled to me.

Daddy is brilliant at playing. I think it comes from basically being a large child himself.

His main motivation behind having children, I believe, was that one day they will be old enough to join him in his love of Lego.

Remaining calm

I am not a particularly shouty mum, although I do say ‘f!cksake’ under my breath about a hundred times a day, but I have my moments. When my iPhone met the water table the toddler was very lucky that I had a friend over to stop me screaming ‘Oh god WHHHYYY??’ over and over. I was not happy.
Daddy on the other hand has the patience that only someone with regular day-long breaks from the children (or medication, maybe) can have. When he does raise his voice, you know something bad has happened.

Getting a fussy toddler to eat

Preparing and cleaning up after six meals and countless snacks each day, I’m slightly less than excited about the whole process. If they don’t want to eat whatever I’ve lovingly plated up my go to response is eating it myself and giving them a banana, whereas daddy has endless patience for the ‘is that MY dinner you’re eating?’ game which is the only way the toddler will currently consider eating vegetables.

Going out of the house

I spend ages making sure we have everything. Nappies, wipes, drinks, jumpers, snacks, spare outfits, dummies, bibs, things with which to entertain the children in case of an unexpected two minute wait somewhere… Some days it takes so long to get ready that by the time everything is assembled, and both kids have had a last minute poo (of course) then the place we are going has closed.

He doesn’t even look in the bag and assumes that everything he needs is in there. If it isn’t, he just buys it. I don’t know why I can’t be more like this really. There would be more hours in my day.

Taking the kids out to lunch

My husband recently took both children out for food on his own in order to let mummy get on with some important jobs (and have a bath). Upon leaving, a middle aged woman ran up to him and said she just had to tell him what a good job he was doing.
Literally no one has ever done this to me and we go out all the time; all I get are comments on how much they can eat (what, you’ve never seen a baby eat an entire pizza before?) and, sometimes, glowing compliments about the toddler’s hair. Very few congratulations on how well I’m managing (probably because they’re both whinging while I quietly sob into my tea) even though I rarely let them have chips with ice cream for lunch.

Bath time

I don’t even know why I put myself through this most evenings. If daddy happens to be home early though, or at the weekends, he seems to be adept at making the experience fun as opposed to traumatic.

I do wonder whether, if the roles were reversed and it was I that was out all day, I would become the fun parent.

Without the constant tidying of crumbs and wiping of bottoms, would I have more energy to sit on the floor and play? If I didn’t have to listen to near constant whinging from 6am – 7pm, would I be more patient? Would I drink less wine of an evening? Would I swear under my breath less often?

I am the same. Every flipping weekday night as soon as they hear Daddy they are like "YAAAAAAYYYY Daddy is home" and they run to greet him, high five him, treat him like a king yada yada. What do I get NOTHING, a big fat zero. Pft. Rude. I suggest we go on strike then they would realise how much we rock! #bigpinklink

Generally I'm more hard line than my wife. It's like The Simpsons gag when Homer says "but they know my one weakness. I'm weeeak…".

It's not so much weakness as losing a battle of attrition and constant demands and tantrums. It doesn't always work in my favour as sometimes it means wasting my energy on pointless battles of principle!

I sometimes feel like the not-so-fun parent. My boyfriend likes to goof off more with A and be silly, but I tend to be more serious. He's great though. I don't think I could manage without him. #TribalLove

I am just trying to get my daughter to eat her cold congealed porridge (it wasn't like that half an hour ago, obviously) and she just caught sight of the photo of "the little girl ea-ea i-cream" and is now flailing about in a tantrum because she wants some!!! Anyway – onto the post – this is so true! I feel like boring reliable mummy all of the time, I would love to be the carefree one walking out the door with just my car keys and a child, getting toddler to squat on a grass verge instead of using the travel potette and making them scrambled eggs for every meal. One day when she is a teenager and wants her ears pieced / hair highlighted and only mummy will let her – that is when i will be the favoured one…#chucklemums

My daughter is usually going into post-supper pre-bed meltdown when her father walks through the door, and she instantly starts beaming at him. I usually try to throw her at him so I can get things done and we are both furious if he decides he needs to go to the loo or change before he takes the baton. #ChuckleMums

haha! I hated playing when they were young.. never really my thing.. but dad, yep! he was all over it.. the thing is now they are older, he gets a bit competitive and the games sometimes end up with the preteen being a rather sore loser lol – #chucklemums

My husband is definitely better at playing than I am. He's also way more relaxed about leaving the house – as long as he has some nappies and wet wipes, he's not too worried. My daughter thinks he's pretty much the best thing ever. #chucklemums

Oh I can relate to this! I am the uptight parent, worrying about everything, trying to plan ahead and foresee any hiccups and prevent any stressful situations, run a tight ship etc etc.. then in saunters Daddy, the cool, calm, chilled, laid-back, placid, carefree parent.. no wonder he is idolised! Grrrr… #chucklemums

It's the very same in my house, as soon as daddy is home I don't even exist anymore. A particularly annoying 'daddy is best' moment happened the other day. I cook all the meals day in day out in our house so hubby took his once in a blue moon turn, made birds eyes finest, chicken dippers and chips. My three year old then loudly proclaimed "daddy is the best cook ever!" So nice to feel appreciated! �� X

What a lovely tribute to your husband. It is lovely that they get great things from daddy and from mummy. My Father too is better at playing as he doesn't care about making an absolute mess, whereas Mother is probably better at putting me to bed (if Father can't get me down, he just gives up and brings me downstairs again for more play til I'm knackered out. I appreciate this enormously. Mother does not). It's all about balance 😉 x #chucklemums

When it is just me and the girls during the week – they nap for an hour. Daddy comes home and wonders why I am exhausted when they sleep for 2.5 hours per nap on the weekend. While he does tend yell, "Relax!" to them more than I do, if I am not around – they quiety play. If I am around, then they scream like banshees. 🙂

My hubs defo gets the award for being woken up in the morning first!, playing football/cricket, remembering PE kit and maths homework! As we work from home we both get to share the after school excitable cuddles/whinges! We are a little bit co parenty which I like #chucklemums

My pitfall is def the 'remaining calm' one… First time Baba had colic, I didn't see it coming. I was hysteric and panicked because I was not able to calm him down. In two minutes, Grumpy Boyfriend calmed him down and then it was my turn to have a cuddle. I was in tears. So unfair!!!! #chucklemums

I can't even do stories according to my 3 year old it's like a scene from 'Outnumbered' if I even dare to attempt bedtime stories so much so when my husband went out last weekend I just let the IPad read the Gruffalo instead! Us mum's just clearly aren't as fun! #chucklemums

Oh god I hate imaginary play with the Child – there are so many rules and when I accidentally do something mildly amusing I have to repeat it all the livelong day! I can't wait until the Child is old enough to watch repeat of Friends and drink gin (I'm thinking 11 or 12 years old?). #chucklemums

I, too, shove a banana in when all else fails. Actually, a chocolate yoghurt if I'm honest. And yesterday I resorted to alternating mouthful of fish pie with mouthful of chocolate yoghurt. I think it's ok. #chucklemums

I'm terrible at playing! I think Dads can more easily ignore all the jobs which need doing, so can just chill with the kids (which is a quality to admire – as long as the jobs get done at some point, I guess!) #chucklemums

Second attempt at commenting, as WordPress didn't like me before…unknown identity my arse! Anyway, basically I said that if Dad can create that Lego spaceship then respect! I'm with you on not enjoying sitting on the floor with them and playing – that's why I had several children, so that they can sit and play together, while I have a cuppa or such like. Even now when monopoly is mentioned, I run and hide! Terrible, I know. If you got this comment in duplicate – apologies 🙂 Alison madhousemum #chucklemums

Daddy is better at playing in our house too! He's really rough and tumble and my little boys loves it, I'm a boring play mate! I love that you man had congratulations from a middle aged woman, hilarious! Also, they are the most opinionated about parenting, so he MUST have been impressive!

It's the same in our home – Daddy is way more fun. And yes being good at reading that bit of paper that comes with the Lego thing is a very big plus point. My other half has the patience to make Lego sets for hours and of course the kids think he is so cool. You do have a point – if the roles were reversed and Daddy had to do all the chores, would he have time and patience? But then again, mine wouldn't care whether or not the kids had clean clothes. Thanks for sharing with #bigpinklink

In our house, it's exactly the same Fran. Daddy is for play fighting, lego building and general frivolity, Mummy is for moaning, waitressing, poo cleaning up and being a taskmaster. i think if my other half was home with the kids all day and roles were reversed, I would be better than Daddy. Day to day parenting is hard… And besides, we are the best at Gin and Wine drinking 😉#chucklemums

It took him the whole of Christmas. In moving it I almost took it apart so he had to do most of it again. Totally agree. Most of the reason we have two is the hope that one day they can amuse each other without input from me.

We tried to have a "family cuddle" when Mr NJC got home the other night. My son who had been my best buddy all day, literally shoved me out of the way by my face so he could have daddy to himself! Charming! #KCACOLS

Again chuckling to myself and contemplating the mummy vs daddy in our house. Daddy definitely likes doing to louder, more rough playing than I do. He chases him around, shouting loudly while I tell him to use his inside voice. On the flip side though, he's not really very good at any other types of playing. #KCACOLS

My kids are older and I still get this, my hubby (kids stepdad) is the go to if they need something, built or help with a project and their dad is there for all the fun stuff like over sugary meals and fun times out. But at least it gives me a little time to get bits done 😉#KCACOLS

Haha – we have the exact same split in attitudes to preparing for leaving the house here too. I don't really have any problems with bath time – our two love it regardless – but daddy definitely makes it more of a play time. It's the time thing though. I do bath efficiently because I need to do other things – clean, tidy up, get bedrooms ready, etc. Daddy puts a lot of effort into fun baths & the girls love it. But it takes about an hour & nothing else gets done! #chucklemums

Ha! Oh bless!! He sounds like a handy one to have around! I wish I could sing the same praises of mine…though I will give him playing! He is definitely better at playing than me!! And lego building! #KCACOLS

If you're no good at Lego, then I'm afraid you've had it!Seriously, though, I think a lot of families are like this. It reminds me of my own childhood, too. My mum, bless her, was a terrific carer, and my dad put the excitement in. Happy days. [sigh]

The dad's just seem to have it on the excitement front don't they. Even if it's not playing and doing something really dull – it's always more fun. I am totally the crowd in our 3. I can see a little change occurring as The Kid is getting older. Until then I shall sit on my own! Thanks for linking up to #KCACOLS. Hope you can join us again next Sunday.

I feel the same as you Fran! I spend my days feeding the baby, wiping the baby, changing the baby, getting the baby to sleep. When Daddy gets home it's playtime right before bedtime, which usually ends up in a overworked baby. I think my little girl massively prefers Daddy over me, some days I don't even get a smile. Hopefully that'll change when I go back to work in a few weeks. Claire x #KCACOLS

We have role reversal in our household and I'm usually the one who gets home late from work. As a result, I'm the one who sits on the floor an plays for ages with my daughter. I have far more patience and am a pretty soft touch. However, my other half is much better at reading stories (in a slow, involved way), which he does occasionally – I'm far too much of a whirlwind. 🙂 Great post! #KCACOLS

My other half is definitely better at playing, bathtime and dinner. As soon as he arrives home from work it's like I don't exist. Usually I've been battling for almost a hour trying to get Clem to eat, he walks in and she immediately starts eating it all. He's also better at reading bedtime stories and doing silly voices. She always seems bored when I read them.x #KCACOLS

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