James Chance, Andrew W.K., ?uestlove, Kim Gordon, and many others walk into a bar to participate in “Improvised Round Robin Duets”

Red Bull can do anything. That’s the theme of this 100% totally insane performance NY’s Red Bull Music Academy is putting on called “A Night of Improvised Round Robin Duets.” You want to hear James Chance blow out a wacked saxophone riff to an Andrew W.K. party jam? You got it! You wanna see Julia Holter get down with ?uestlove? It ain’t no thang! You wanna stay up for 37 straight hours just by drinking tiny cans of weird soda? No problem! RED BULL CAN DO IT.

See, the wise scholarly owls over at the Red Bull Music Academy, in conjunction with Search and Restore, Boom Collective, and the Undead Music Series have assembled a dream team of musical innovators for an evening of once-in-a-lifetime sonic border demolishing. The format is simple. The first musician gets onstage, does a solo improv thing for five minutes. Then, up comes musician #2 for five minutes of making sweet music together. At which point, musician #1 says good night and musician #3 comes up to party with musician #2. And so on and so on. It’s a Fibonacci sequence of improvised ART MUSIC. The magic happens on May 1 and Brooklyn’s Masonic Temple, where luminaries like the aforementioned ?uestlove, Andrew W.K., James Chance, and Julia Holter boogie down with Glenn Kotche (Wilco), Kim Gordon, Bernie Worrell (Parliament), DJ Spinna, Dosh, jazz clarinetist Don Byron, avant garde cellist Erik Friedlander, grammy-winning sax dude Joe Lovano, jazz guitarist Mary Halvorson, saxophonist Matana Roberts, and bassist/Flying Lotus associate Thundercat. AND THERE’S MORE TO COME. Whaaaaaat? People say America is a melting pot. NO. This Red Bull improvised music night is a melting pot AND THE BREAD OR LITTLE POTATO WEDGES OR WHATEVER STUFF YOU STICK IN THE FONDUE IS OUR HEARTS. (Because obviously the music is fondue. Or the skewers? What would be the fondue then — Red Bull? Ugh. Metaphor = too complicated, too stupid.)

Anyway, in sum, Red Bull is taking all the musicians ever and sticking them all into this one night spectacular at the beginning of the energy drank’s frankly pretty kickass Music Academy series of events. Taking place from April 28-May 31, the entire fest features performances and talks from the likes of Brian Eno, Laurel Halo, Erykah Badu and Giorgio Moroder.