Streaming Audio/Lyrics

Online Dating

03:44

Uncle Pumpkin

written by Dan Grennes

Lyrics

Online Dating

I like to runaround in the nude, now are we telling the truthI got so good at doctoring and altering my faceTo trim my extra weightI probably drink to much but I’m ready to loveI haven’t had any luck with online dating, so far

Now I swear I’m not a psycoBut I got caught watching my 16 year old neighbor last nightNo big deal, right?Now I’ve got a question for youAre you accepting of a man’s great need to please himself outrightWhenever the time is right

I don’t like much sports, I don’t like teaI don’t swish or floss between my teethMy stomach condition gives me gasIn the morning my room smells like ass

I like to runaround in the nude, now are we telling the truthI got so good at doctoring and altering my faceTo trim my extra weightI probably drink too much but I’m ready to loveI haven’t had any luck with online dating, so far

In my bed your picture liesI undress it with my eyesAnd I love youThat is I’ll do just what it takes to be above you

Can you tell I’m kind of hairy?I used to shave it all off but it gave me rashes where the sun don’t shineAnd it grew back just finePeople say I’m kind of scaryBecause suppressing my feelings can make me want to knock out someone’s lightsWhen I’m drinkin right

I don’t have a degree, I don’t like schoolI don’t like most things that people doI don’t like to spend money on my foodBut I could spend the night with you

I like to runaround in the nude, now are we telling the truthI got so good at doctoring and altering my faceTo trim my extra weightI probably drink to much but I’m ready to loveI haven’t had any luck with online dating, so far