Searching the internet whilst trying to find out if there are any decent NFL games anymore for PC (there aren't), I came across a review of the time-vacuum more affectionately known as Football Manager 2012.

To my surprise, one of the comments following the review debated the games more than worthy 9.5 out of 10 rating for longevity, arguing that all the game involved was signing the best players available at any given time that fit a chosen tactic and then winning until you've won everything, and that even if you started at a really low level, the method was still the same, it just took longer.

This glib deconstruction of the Football Manager myth actually has some truth to it. It is quite possible to approach the game this way. Anyone who has played through a few iterations has likely developed their favoured way of playing; once they have achieved success with this method more than a couple of times, they might also find the experience hollow.

Here then, are a handful of suggestions to keep things fresh. Think of them as self-imposed restrictions, scenarios to provide a new challenge. Some of them might take a few seasons to implement properly, others are a little more immediate, and most border on the ridiculous:

Challenge 1 : Logan's Run

No players 30 or older. As soon as a player turns 30 you must sell him or buy him out. Time to see if you really can win with kids.

Challenge 2 : Itchy Feet

You must accept any new managerial job you are offered, regardless of which team approaches you or how well things are going with your current team. See how much success you can achieve with each side before getting headhunted.

Challenge 3 : Non-League or Bust! - The Confidence Trickster

Starting with a Premier League team, get relegated all the way to non-league without losing your job.

Challenge 4 : Let's Go Dutch

Play the game as normal with one exception : you can only ever sign and select Dutch players. Oh, and you're not allowed to be a Dutch team, either.

Challenge 5 : Hey Big Spender

Each new season, when the board have set your new transfer budget, you must blow the whole lot on one single player. See if you can win with a horribly unbalanced team of relative superstars.

Challenge 6 : Bargain Hunter

Each new season, when the board have set your new transfer budget, spend it all on as many players as you can. Aim for at least 10. See if you can win with an enormously deep squad with next to no star power.

Challenge 7 : Grow Your Own (Wenger's Revenge)

You can't sign any players over 21, but you can sign as many prospects as you like. See if you can achieve success with a purely home-grown side. Unlike the 'Logan's Run' scenario, you can keep your home grown players until any age.

Challenge 8 : Wheeler Dealer

Make at least 15 transfers every window, no exceptions. Buying and selling both count.

Challenge 9 : Haircut 100

Your team must only include players with extravagant hairstyles (Fellaini, Gervinho, etc). For NewGens, this means the big bushy styles or extreme blonde/ginger colours. Preferably a combination of both. Conversely, assemble a team of baldies.

Challenge 10 : Who Ate all the Pies?

Your team must only include players of at least 13 stone in weight or 6'4" in height.

Challenge 11 : Charge of the Slight Brigade

Your team must only include players less than 10 stone in weight or 5'8" in height.

Challenge 12 : Trouble in Paradise

Mutually terminate the contracts of your entire backroom staff, and employ the worst possible candidates you can find in their place. Try to find physios with less than 5 in physiotherapy, scouts with low scores in judging ability & potential, and so on. Assign coaches to their least suitable roles. See if you can succeed whilst being undermined by an awful backroom staff.

Challenge 13 : X's and Oh No's

Either deliberately or randomly pick a formation you haven't used before or you know you don't like. Force yourself to use this formation exclusively from now on. See how well you can adapt.

Challenge 14 : X's and Who Knows?

Use a different random tactic every game. You must at the very least exhaust all the pre-set formations before you can re-use them. Bonus points for using the tactics creator to manufacture unique formations to prolong the cycle.

Challenge 15 : Runs in the Family

Assemble a team where all the players have one high attribute (or group of attributes) in common; for example, only sign players with at least 16 in Determination, Decisions and/or Aggression. Or do it the hard way and only sign players with low attributes in common (less than 5).

Challenge 16 : Puppet on a String

Play the game as normal, but implement and follow your backroom staff's advice as much as possible. This means auto-assigning coaches and training schedules, taking coaches advice on training Preferred Moves, signing players and staff who are recommended to you, offering/withdrawing players for transfer and loan as advised, letting your assistant manager handle all conferences, allowing one of your staff pick the team, and so on. See if you can succeed whilst being a front for your suddenly highly influential staff.

Challenge 17 : Kick it Old Skool

Set your teams three formations to 2-3-5 (Pyramid), 2-3-2-3 (Metodo) and the W-M (3-2-2-3). Try and win with these classic pre-war formations, and no others.

Challenge 18 : Hairdryer Jam

Always use the 'aggressive' tone whenever communicating with anyone about anything. Under no circumstances change.

Challenge 19 : Bridge of Sighs

As Challenge 18, but you must only ever use the 'reluctant' tone, or the nearest to it when not available.

Challenge 20 : The Dice Man (Rhinehart Rides Again)

Get yourself a dice and use it to decide every move you make in the game. You must obey the dice. (You can also substitute a coin, but a dice allows for more possibilities.)

Challenge 21 : Pin the Tail on the Teamsheet

Each match, select your first eleven and subs completely at random. Extra points for not even paying attention to positions.

Challenge 22 : Locals Only

Assemble a squad comprised solely of players born in the city the team is based in.

Challenge 23 : United Colours of Benetton

Every player in your squad must have a different nationality.

Challenge 24 : Managerial Merry-Go-Round

Start with a team in a relatively small division, such as the Australian or Croatia firsts. Try to work your way through management stints with all the teams in the league, applying for vacancies when they come up and so on. As relegation will change the composition of the league one year to the next, you 'win' when you have managed all of the teams presently in the division at any one time.

Challenge 25 : Onions in the Ointment

Before you start a new game, use the editor to create a bunch of new players. Make them all young, with 200 potential, and either leave them as free agents, or assign them to really low league teams. This way, the players will gradually 'rise to the top' and proliferate throughout your Football Manager world. You might even sign one or two of them yourself. You can have fun with how you choose to create each player; randomizing attributes say, or designing players to be overtly aggressive or highly skilful, or making freakishly tall players, and so on. Obviously, it's more fun if you make players who are unusual in some way. You could invent players based on all-time greats (what if Maradonna was an 18 year old again in today's leagues?) or, better yet, create yourself and your friends. See how you all develop. N.B. It's important to give the players really high potential (200 is maximum), because factors such as poor training facilities at lower league clubs, lack of playing time at big, star-studded clubs and injuries will negatively impact the player's development. Maximising their potential increases the chance the player will develop into an impact player you will notice, and not just an anonymous squad player.

See? Hours of fun. Occasionally stupid or pointless fun, but fun nonetheless. Better round that 9.5 up to the full 10. If anyone actually tries any of these suggestions, or has a few of their own, do let us know how you got on.

Well, the new Swansea away kit has been revealed, initially at the teams Adidas marketing stunt / public photo shoot, for which anyone could gain access by virtue of having bought the brand new home jersey. With the team and Adidas both hoping that making people feel included in a team event would translate into even more jersey sales, the away kit was duly unveiled and put on sale the same day. Well, y'know that special kind of awkwardness you feel when you completely misjudge a birthday or christmas gift, or conversely, when you receive a bad gift yourself? Imagine that, only two thousand people are experiencing it at the same time and it's your fault. That is how Adidas should feel. Here's the kit:

Now, I have to admit, as a kit unto itself, I actually like it. The colour is fine with me, even if it will encourage even more tedious Blackpool comparisons. It is only when you realise that Adidas have fobbed the team and it's fans off with another template that things begin to turn sour. And this isn't just a template that's been used on a bunch of other teams, which is bad enough as it is - that's already the case with the home jersey. This template is part of the bog standard Adidas "teamwear" range, available to amateurs, jumpers-for-goalposts enthusiasts, local teams, the man in the street, his dog, you and me, and just about anyone else with a little over a tenner in change in their pocket :

The retail price from the team shop is £40. Are the logos worth another £30? Did Adidas just send a load of surplus "teamwear" stock in an unpopular colour to the printers and tell them to send the whole lot second class to Swansea? It isn't even the price. Everyone knows "sports wear" is made criminally cheaply and generates diabolically large profit margins. That's not news. It's the fob off which is the burn. It is insulting and embarrassing for any team, much less a Premier League team, to have to wear a shirt freely available for not much more than a Big Mac meal at your local sportsdirect store. Adidas are the second biggest and most profitable sports wear manufacturer in the world (next to Nike). They can't afford to make unique designs for Premier League teams? For all professional teams for that? It's pathetic, really. Again, it's not so much the design, or even the colour, which I know I'm in the minority for liking, it's the complete lack of class shown in not even being bothered to spend more than five minutes making a proper kit for a top flight team. I'm starting to wish the Swans had stuck with Umbro.

Please just sell want-away ball-hog Nasri and let Fabregas go to Barca. The entire football world is bored to death with this story. Your team has not won anything in years, and although every team is rounded out with squad players, it is the stars who define the team. Your stars have not won any silverware. Sell them, tear up the teamsheet, and start again. Watching your protracted battle of wills with Fabregas is like watching a best friend whimper over his cheating girlfriend and try to make a lame last-ditch effort to keep her. It's over, man. Just let her go.

My flatmate showed me an apparently leaked picture of the new Swans 2011/12 away kit, officially set to be unveiled this Wednesday. This is the picture:

This is not the new away kit, however. We subsequently tracked the image down to a Swans forum and found it out is exactly what it looks like; a mock-up done by a fan, based on rumours the away kit will be orange - the first time Swansea have had orange in their colour scheme since the sixties. The big fake clue is the sponsor - the logo has changed, as seen on the new home shirt.

This mock up uses the template Adidas used on Derby County amongst others - I actually think they might have done well by giving Swansea this template instead of the one they did use, which is obviously the plain-colour version of a template designed primarily to display stripes. It is only when you see a striped version that the seemingly over-fussy neck trim makes any sense.

The fact Adidas chose to give Swansea a stripes-based template makes me wonder if they intend to use stripes on the away shirt... and assuming the rumours of a return to orange are true, here's a poorly made mock-up of my own to show what it might look like :

I might be in the minority, but I actually like the idea of orange. My only concern was that an all-orange shirt would be too close to white (both fairly light colours), but such considerations originally came about because fans with black and white television sets needed a lot of contrast. Since no-one's used black and white sets since about 1,000,000 BC I suppose it doesn't matter anymore. Besides, my mock-up has tasty black stripes anyway. The sponsors logo clashes something dreadful with that colour, but nevermind.

Trying a different approach, here's another mock up I made which assumes the shirt will be exactly the same as the home jersey, only orange :

Once again, that sponsor logo is pukatronic with those colours, so let's imagine this instead :

That's better, but as I point out every time I make a post about kits, designers are all too often scared of sexy simplicity and opt instead for explosions of geometric confusion or plain old unimaginable horror. So I wouldn't be at all surprised if the rumours of orange were just a (clashing) red herring thrown out to keep the fans off the scent of the real away kit, which could be purple, brown, grue, bleen, hooloovoo or squant. It's been half a dozen different colours in the past, and away kits are rapidly becoming the kit designer's chance to exercise their creative license... or sense of humour. I guess, as with everything else, we'll have to wait and see.

Well, the big news is Brendan Rogers was right when he suggested there was no truth to the Grzegorz Sandomierski or Scott Loach rumours, proving the point by going out and signing Benfica keeper Moreira instead. I'm pleased about this because, if nothing else, it hopefully means I won't have to type "Grzegorz Sandomierski" anymore.

Moreira is not the tallest keeper, which won't help Swansea's dwarf defence (although Stephen Caulker should help there), and YouTube says he mostly follows the European keeper tradition of punching and pushing instead of actually catching the ball. Remember when keepers actually caught the ball? Recalling Peter Cech's comments about the dearth of quality domestic keepers, I shouldn't think this will be a problem as most Premier keepers are European after all (as Cech was keen to point out), and if Heurelho Gomes can hold down a day job on a Premier league team, then anyone else with fists instead of hands can, too.

I realise this rant so far sounds like I'm not a fan of Moreria, but that's not true. I'm actually really excited about the prospect; Swansea's keeper vacancy was always going to be the story of the summer (for Swans fans), because whoever Buck brought in would instantly become the starter at the only position where mistakes generally end up in goals against. Hence, it's arguably the most important decision to get right. Assuming Moreira's knees will hold up, I think it's a coup for the club; he's got international experience and being the number one keeper (albeit sporadically) for one of Portugal's best (only) two teams gives him a pedigree none of the Swans' other suppossed targets have.

Also, for what it's worth, Moreira has something in common with Dearly Departed De Vries; they were both outfield players in their youth, which presumably makes Moreira similarly confident at playing the ball with his feet, an asset instrumental to the way Swansea play. Of course, it's fair to say that any keeper ought to be able to "play the ball with his feet", given that things like basic ball control and playing short, simple passes are foundation skills which any self-respecting professional ought to have mastered (or self respecting sunday-leaguer for that) regardless of position. The simple distinction is that Swansea ask their keepers to make use of these skills whereas most teams don't. Again, I don't want that to sound like I'm trying to take the shine of the signing; you'd never believe it from this post so far, but I am excited by this move and frankly can't wait to see the man in action.

Also fairly newsworthy - the Eidur Gudjohnsen situation has done another flip, and this time reports are saying it's all on again, though nothing has been confirmed or posted on any of the more reputable news sites. Guess we'll have to wait and see on this one. Maybe Gudjohnsen was Soriano Plan-B?

Grzegorz Sandomierski: Brendan Rogers recently said "We have been linked with all sorts of keepers... who are just not in my thinking". And that's keepers plural, which probably means any interest in the only two keepers linked with the club til now - Sandomierski and Scott Loach - is little more than press speculation. Two Frosty Cold Ones

David Stockdale : The team has to get a keeper and fast, which is why I'm making this rumour Warm.

Jonathan Soriano : Apparently, the two sides couldn't agree on the contract. Cool.

Isaac Vorsah : Huw Jenkins has rubbished this one completely. Off.

It'll be interesting to see which players the Swans do eventually pick up. It shouldn't come as any surprise that 9 of every 10 names thrown about in the press are either the work of fantasists, bored journos or player agents stirring up interest in their clients, but there have to be signings of some kind, and soon. The team still has a glaring hole (or two) in net as well as needs at every other position; the shopping list ought to include at least one more defender (preferably a full-back, ideally another centre half as well), at least one central midfielder and at least one more striker. Some depth out wide would be nice, too. So far, the team has only added Graham and Caulker (on loan).

So Dorus De Vries finally left on a free for Wolves. I think everyone saw this coming after the Swans allegedly put a £3M bid on the table for Grzegorz Sandomierski.

In his press statement, De Vries said :

"But sometimes as a professional player you have to get out of your comfort zone a little bit to be able to find your true potential"

If by "true potential" you mean "bigger paycheck", then yes, quite.

Speaking about De Vries, Wolves chief exec Jez Moxey said :

"Dorus was their first choice goalkeeper throughout those promotions and has only missed a handful of league games in the last four years"

I'm guessing he'll be missing quite a few more from here on in. Makes me wonder if De Vries has actually seen Wayne Hennessey play? Of course, that's a moot point since this is obviously a last-contract-of-a-career cash grab and effectively a semi-retirement. Nevermind, eh? If it was me I might like to actually play a few games in the Premier League having worked so hard to get there, but I suppose it takes all kinds.

Anyway, moving on, here's hoping £3M is enough to bring 6 and a half feet of Eastern European excellence to the Liberty.

Well, it felt like Christmas morning when I booted up my pc to take a look at the new Swans home kit this morning. I had misgivings about the team's change to Adidas after Umbro made a pretty nice job of last seasons kit, especially considering some of the awful template-based designs Adidas have pushed on the football world in recent years.

However, they've done Chelsea and AC Milan a couple of reasonably good turns already, so my expectation was positive.

As it turned out, the kit looks about 80% the same as what I imagined they'd do; realising the Milan and Chelsea kits are once again template based, I had imagined the obvious thing to do would be to go all white with black neck trim, shoulder stripes and logos.

Here's what actually happened:

Now, that's pretty tasty. Like I said, it was 80% of what I expected, which means I like it about 80% as much as I hoped I would. The shirt loses 10% for the over wrought neck trim and another 10% for what initially appears to be pointless black slashes down the sides. However, on closer inspection, those slashes run around to the back and join up rather pleasingly.

I would have loathed those stripes if they went nowhere, because I generally like my sports uniforms clean, simple and high impact, but the way they connect is actually almost appropriate, given they make the shape of the old D.A. haircut that was all the rage when I was a kid (not in the fifties, the resurgence in the eighties). And a duck isn't so far removed from a swan. They hang around together all the time in lakes from what I've seen.

Plus, when you add in the players name and number, the black lines almost look like a kind of coat of arms pattern, which is another way of saying a shield, which is a defensive symbol and might subliminally help stop the likes of Manchester United and Co. from putting 8 past us next season.

The kit is actually close enough to the version of it I imagined that I can put my basic photoshop skills to use to show you exactly what I did imagine. And it was this :

C'mon, tell me that's better, because we all know it is. See, Adidas? This is why you should put me in one of your design teams, assuming you have teams and not just one guy with a penchant for unnecessary detail. Actually, to be honest, in my perfect world, the sponsor and the black parts would all be a very light grey, so the shirt was basically two-tone white (actually, in my perfect perfect world, there would be no shirt sponsors. Ah, remember the good old days?). Still, what with money talking as much as it apparently does, I don't think the sponsor would be very happy to have a nearly invisible logo. However, they might have conceeded to this :

Again, I consider that an improvement even over my original imagined version. Keeping it mono keeps it simple, and the sponsor is at least relegated to equal footing with the team (imagine that!) in colour if not size.

Anyway, all told, it's pretty good. I'd still like to buy one, though I am intrigued about the away uniform, which won't be revealed for almost another month. I've said before that black makes sense (because you get both black and white swans, obviously!), but internet rumour has mentioned orange (which was actually the first additional colour to feature on any Swansea kit). Personally, I'm betting on either red, which we've seen before, or the two-tone blue, which we've also seen before.

I guess we'll have to play a bit of wait-and-see. In the meantime, here's some pics of the full kit with the shorts and everything, as though you haven't already seen them :

Craig Mackail-Smith : Apparently Swansea are one of three teams (the others being Norwich and Everton) who are interested in the Peterborough striker. Mostly because he's British and playing in a lower league, this rumour seems more likely than the exotic promise of Sidney Govou or Jonathan Soriano, but I have my doubts. Mackail-Smith has scored prolifically at League One level, not so prolifically at Championship level and has never played at Premier League level. The Swans already have one or two strikers who struggled to score at Championship level... would this transfer really bring anything extra? Cool

Grzegorz Sandomierski : A highly sought after (i.e. on Chelsea's radar) young Polish goalkeeper who is huge and apparently quite good. Whether the Swans apparent interest in him is an indication that Dorus De Vries might turn down a new contract is anyone's guess. Both Swans goalkeepers are out of contract at the moment anyway, so there is a need regardless of what DDV chooses to do. He also wears his socks high like Scott Sinclair, which has nothing to do with anything. Warm

Max Gradel : Pacy Leeds wingman Gradel would offer some reassurance on the wing, and if the reported price of £1.5M is accurate, this would be a reasonably sound move. He's also untested at Premier League level, but no doubt would ask for less wages than, say, Vincente, and might be more durable anyway. Lukewarm

Steven Caulker : Swansea look to be the front runners to sign Caulker on a season-long loan, though Norwich are also in the mix. Hot

Ronald Vargas : Swansea apparently have some interest in signing the highly skilled Venezuelan attacking midfielder from Club Brugge, but Vargas is nursing a serious a.c.l injury and has been out of action since February. Long Shot

Eidur Gudjohnsen : The team has officially denied interest. Gudjohnsen might have been seen as a solution in the Championship last winter, but maybe the Swans have higher ambitions now. Cooling Off

Sidney Govou : The French international striker has been approached by a Premier league club, thought to be Swansea. Lukewarm

Ryan Bertrand : Swansea are looking to sign the Chelsea & England Under 21's defender. This looks like rumour mongers adding up Rogers previously exploited Chelsea connections and Swansea's need for defence and coming up with 5. On the other hand, he is a left back (converted from the wing), and Swansea do need a left back, particularly if Neil Taylor goes to Newcastle. Lukewarm