The campaign is up and running, and there’s nothing that the liberal press salivates over more than asking conservative presidential contenders what they think about all things homosexual—especially homosexual “mirage” (to borrow Pastor Doug Wilson’s term) or “pseudogamy” (to borrow Professor Anthony Esolen’s term).

Most conservative politicians respond with nervous, evasive, self-conscious, and intellectually unsatisfying answers. The reasons for their awkward and ineffective responses likely range from ignorance to fear to absence of genuine conviction.

Those contenders who lack conviction on same-sex faux marriage are playing the worst kind of political game, deliberately deceiving and exploiting conservative voters by pretending to understand and care about an issue about which they are ignorant. To them I say, begone. Any man or woman who claims to be conservative but fails to care about or understand the essential place true marriage occupies in culture or the implications of homo-marriage needs to go away and make themselves useful in another occupation. For the other two types of candidate, I offer several brief suggestions:

1.) Have the humility and wisdom to contact someone who more fully understands the cultural implications of issues related to sexuality, marriage, and gender confusion, and can teach you. Ignore the foolish advice from handlers and strategists. On issues related to sexual perversion and gender confusion, purported conservative handlers and strategists are often as ignorant as liberals.

There exist smart, wise, courageous men and women who can teach you because they know more than you and have been in the trenches for years trying to prevent the cultural mess in which we find ourselves mired, with the First Amendment in tatters, public education promoting perversion and confusion to children, and children being purchased like commodities.

Don’t assume you know more than these men and women do. Some of them have been warning for years that religious liberty, speech rights, parental rights, and children’s rights will be undermined, and most conservative politicians and their strategists ignored them. Stop ignoring them.

2.) Disabuse yourself of the notion that you can appease or appeal to homosexuals or their ideological allies by assuming a mushy middle of the road position on states’ rights, or civil unions, or by announcing you would attend a same-sex anti-wedding, or by proclaiming that if Bruce Jenner thinks he’s a woman, then doggone it, you think he’s a woman.

The only thing that will appease those who have adopted leftist views on sexuality, gender, and marriage is total ideological, moral, and political surrender. Those who foolishly believe that homoerotic desire and activity are analogous to race; or who believe that genderless non-marriage is identical to true, sexually complementary, conjugal marriage; or who believe that homoeroticism is morally, ontologically, and teleologically identical to heterosexuality will tolerate no spineless, ambiguous half-capitulation. They are so totalitarian in their goals that they will sacrifice even the First Amendment and children’s rights in the service of normalizing sodomy and sodomitic unions.

3.) Go on the offensive in interviews—which is not the same as being hostile. It simply means, challenge the idiotic assumptions that undergird the pro-perversion movement. Virtually every proposition the Left asserts in their unholy quest to normalize homosexuality, anti-marriage, and gender confusion lacks coherence and is inconsistently applied. Learn how to challenge their assumptions as they challenge conservative assumptions. In order to challenge or refute them, however, you first need to know what their assumptions are.

4.) When being interviewed, or debating, or giving speeches, don’t speak hesitantly, nervously, equivocally, evasively, or self-consciously. Speak as if you believe your beliefs are objectively true.

5.) Grow some shoe-leather skin. Don’t worry about what the arrogant and ignorant “progressive” members of the press or homosexual activists will say to or about you. And while you’re working on thickening up your diaphanous skin, pay no attention to Hollywood stars and starlets who strut and tweet their hours upon the stage and then will be heard no more. Their way is the way to a dusty death. Theirs is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. (h/t to the Bard)