Lauri Peterson

Last night on Real Housewives of Orange County we were treated to a delightfully classy over-the-hill bachelorette party for one in particular mid-life crisis bride's third wedding.

If that weren't enough Lauri Peterson demonstrated her desperation for relevance by sharing so-called salacious details about Vicki Gunvalson's sex life. I barely made it through last night's episode without throwing up. Thanks for that Bravo.

Things begin with newbie Lydia McLaughlin, in all her wide-eyed optimism, showing up at Tamra Barney's house for some girl talk. Walking into the evil sorceress' cave, Lydia holds her magic fairy dust shield close to her heart and remembers to think positive.

Lydia is just like so impressed and keeps talking about how "classy" and "fancy" Tamra's hostessing is. First of all, the word "classy" and Tamra do not belong in the same sentence.

Next week Lauri returns with even more salacious gossip where Vicki is concerned! She's either bored and wants a reality TV career again, broke and wants a reality TV career again, or both! Whatever the case Vicki is not excited to welcome her back in to the fold!

"Lauri going ring shopping with Tamra was a joke to me," Vicki writes in her blog. "Last time I saw Lauri, she told me how much she couldn't stand Tamra and now she is acting like she is her BFF and confidant. I have no clue why she said what she did about having Tamra taking Donn's wedding ring. I thought that was very classless and very rude."

Real Housewives of Orange County was full all about actors last night. Except the only person who was legitimately doing any acting was Heather Dubrow. And no – she wasn't acting like a biatch this episode. Oh wait… yes she was but not as part of her real life, but as part of a role she was hired to play. But not for Bravo. AAAAHHH! I'm so confused…

Things begin with a blast from the past. Gold digging expert Lauri Peterson is resurrected to give Tamra Barney a little advice on making marriage number three last. Third times a charm, eh! They meet up at a jewelry store and Lauri looks great. All three of her children are doing well and good for her – hopefully life is going smoothly.

Since Lauri and Tamra were never really friends they resort to talking about someone they have in common: Vicki Gunvalson. Tamra fills Lauri in on how post-divorce Vicki is like soooo delusional and dating a loser. Lauri snickers and chooses this time to remind Tamra about how Vicki broke up her marriage to Simon. That's a great thing to be discussing while you're choosing a wedding ring for your third betrothed. #ManEaters

Yes, Vicki and Brooks Ayers are an item again. Oh my. "We are together," Vickitells Us Weekly. Vicki insists he is a "really great guy" who treats her "like a princess."

"Brooks and I have had, definitely, a rough road," The Real Housewives of Orange County star confesses. "We fight to stay together; we fight to leave each other alone. Every other day I'm like, 'I'm too much work for you.'"