I didn't see any threads about this movie, so I decided to start one. Old Fashioned was a 2014 Christian romantic comedy/drama about an "old fashioned" frat bro turned fundie who demands that his hapeless love interest engage in a very controlling courtship to win his affection:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_Fashioned_(film)
I saw this hilarious review of it on Youtube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgDLGWyOTQk
My impression is that Clay is Norman Bates-level creepy, yet we're supposed to think of him as charmingly old-fashioned and wholesome. No, old-fashioned is liking big band music or stamp collecting. Demanding that your significant other completely conform to your narrow mindset with no room for compromise makes you a jerk. it contains lots of courtship/"I Kissed Dating Goodbye" talking points about how conventional dating is just practice for divorce, is inherently superficial, no kissing and limited physical contact before marriage, etc. In other words, if you're already convinced that courtship is the only way to go, you'll love this film. Otherwise, it just comes off like a Christian version of 50 Shades, and manages to be even more pathological than E.L. James's "masterpiece."

I was watching Netflix the other day as I unpacked moving boxes and I got to the episode where we first meet the Bates family. They come to stay with the Duggars. Their very close friends who they hadn't seen in seven years And they jump out of planes, etc (which was actually kind of hip for the Duggars!)
They went on the outing with Amy making fun of it the whole time and the Bates girls were all dressed in matching little girl outfits, even though a number of them were over 18. And they talked about it for a while, about all the girls, toddlers and up, liking to wear matching outfits.
I was sort of stunned. Here we are years later and Erin and Alyssa are both married. And Jill. And almost Jessa. And I'm staring at them. Granted they were younger. But are we to believe that Alyssa, who met her now husband when she was 16, attracted him in those outfits? And Erin with her pink master bedroom. I guess my statement/question is this, even for Fundie men, what is the appeal of this child brides dressed like dolls? Do they really want to go for the rest of their lives with women who know very little about the world? Jill has at least travelled and worked, sort of, as a midwife.
Anyone else have any thoughts? I mean the contrast between seeing them as married women and the dressed in matching outfits...

Last thread here
Joy and Austin are officially engaged. Here's the link, which is also posted in the last thread:
http://www.usmagazine.com/entertainment/news/joy-anna-duggar-is-engaged-to-boyfriend-austin-forsyth-w470282

Pregnancy and childbirth are wonderful when they are your CHOICE. Look at Jessa, who has been PG for 16 months of her 24 months of married life. At just turned 24, that's a hell-of-a start. Can you even imagine?
Find me the vomiting sweat pea.

This is just a post from a magazine for stay at home daughters. http://shiningstarsmagazine.com/to-think-or-not-to-think-handling-romantic-attraction/#more-10506
Basically, you should think about boys as little as possible. I think she's even saying that if you have a crush you should tell your father and get his permission.
Don't talk to your friends about your crush.
Be careful about prayer
If your crush is someone that you have to see
Oh, fundies. With rules like these it's no wonder so many fundie families are having a hard time getting their kids married.

Has anyone seen this documentary from 2015? I looked to see if there was a thread for it but couldn't find anything - apologies if one exists.
I found it so sad. A 33 year old (virginal) woman, traumatized by her parents' divorce when she was a teen, moves in with a middle aged couple who become her spiritual mentors. She has eschewed dating and is now a strong proponent of Christian courtship, despite already having "given away" the "treasure" of her first kiss. The film follows her for the better part of a year. It does not end well.

Daniel Staddon and Kathryn Neely are engaged and tell their loooong story on their new website.
Both parties spent a whole year trying to figure out if they were meant for each other BEFORE SPEAKING EVEN ONCE! Dads played intermediary with lists of stupid questions, and lots of praying and magical Bible signs happened, but girl and boy never spoke once until the girl finally accepted he was the "one". Meanwhile, their families still hung out together and they just pretended nothing was going on! Holy awkwardness!
They are going to marry only 4 months after their very first phone conversation.
This fundie courtship thing has to be the most convoluted, complicated, and irrational process to find a mate in any existing culture on Earth. Even arranged marriage seems easier and less hypocritical than this. They pretend these are love marriages, but how can you fall in love without ever speaking to someone? It's lust at the very best, always originating on the guy's side (because girls can't pursue). Every inch of the way, they're wondering what God thinks or looking for a sign from God, which makes absolutely no sense to me.
What are your thoughts on this?

After months of speculation, it was confirmed that Nathan Bates is courting Ashley Salyer of New York.
Speculation has moved on to engagement, marriage, and so on and so forth.
Part 1 here:
Enjoy!
Edited 7/1: Title edit creativity courtesy of @OnceUponATime

Life event so I figure it deserves it's own thread.
Here's the mystery boy (and I will say the two of them look really happy together). Is he ATI royalty or is this her MRS degree at work?
I will also say that Kelly Bates sure as hell knows how to marry off her children. Assuming that Nathan marries this year and Tori next year that's 5 years in a row with weddings.

Well, since those quiverfull kids aren't getting married fast enough, Vaughn Ohlman has decided to have a retreat to gather all the unwed single people together and pair them off. http://letthemmarry.org/gtm-retreat
Money quotes include, "We are not attempting to limit our conference to Calvinists, but we feel we owe our participants some kind of assurance that they are coming to meet with other Christians."
In all broad mindedness, they accept that daughters may come without a headship, but a young man interested in pursuing her must speak to one of the staff about his intentions.

On the most recent episode of Bringing up Bates, we met Ashley Sayler from NYC, who appeared to be visiting the bates fam (or more specifically, nathan) along with her sister (Anastasia). There was a bit of banter about their flirting, as though the couple may be in a 'pre-courtship' phase. She seems like a bit of a fire-cracker with a lot of spunk, but super christian none the less.
I saw the Bates family follow her on instagram, which is significant being that they only follow 19 people total! Her instagram is public, and she has been posting pictures of her medical missions trip to the Philippines... something that Nathan seems to do annually. Maybe they were in the same missions group?
It will be interesting to see how this progresses!

I was thinking a lot today about Jill and Derrick, and how Jill, before marriage, seemed a lot more outgoing and happy and free-spirited (to the extent she could be) and independent (again to the extent she could). But then she got married, moved out, and now is so clingy on Derrick that it makes ME feel suffocated.
Do you think that Jill, and other fundy women since they never get privacy and always have chaperones, know how they're likely to be? Like do you think Jill knew she would up clingy?
What do you think must go through the head of the husband who finds that the woman he thought he married is really very different once she's out of her parents' house?
I think it has to be scary to find out a side of yourself exists that you didn't know was there, and that it's got to be scary and frustrating for the husband to realize he couldn't possibly have known his wife as well as he thought he did.

Something I don't understand with the Duggars way of thinking....they are all about "self control". Seems to be one of their rehearsed answers when asked about "courting" and refraining from touching, kissing, etc. HOWEVER as soon as they get married, the wife is never supposed to say "no" to her husband when he's "in the mood". Well, that shows NO self control on his part, at all! What's that all about?

What do you suppose the Duggar's reasoning was behind allowing Jill and Jessa to have Twitter and Instagram accounts only once they were officially in courtships? How come Jana and Jinger don't have these same privileges, even though Jana has been given such weighty responsibilities as guardian of the internet (according to A Love That Multiplies, only Jana and Michelle have the internet password), opening the family's mail, and basically being a mom since she was a kid? Of anyone, shouldn't she be emotionally mature and responsible enough to be trusted with a Twitter or Instagram account of her own?
Do the Duggars think that courtship is the magic life event that makes a person a "real" adult, or do they think they're protecting the purity and modesty of their adult children like Jana and Jinger by not allowing them to take endless selfies like Blessa? And if that's the case and the Duggars are as committed to their religiousness as they claim to be, how come the rules of purity and modesty are thrown out the window after marriage?
What are your thoughts on the reasoning behind bequeathing/denying social media to the adult Duggar children?

I wonder if Duggar suitors are expected to have refrained from looking at women, touching, kissing, hugging and having sex, (and probably masturbation as well). Are they disqualified if they've had a girlfriend in the past?
That really makes me wonder if Jana will ever have the joy of a relationship because at 25, her eligible suitors would probably be from maybe 22-32 and they are likely experienced with intimacy in some form. Or perhaps she'll be forced to consider marriage to a teenager, like Jessa, since men her age are having sex.
Do you think Jimbob asks these young men for the details of their sex lives?
Do you think he would allow an 'impure', experienced man to court one of his daughters?

If you look at the picture from the Duggar and Bates confessions (currently on page 2). It looks like someone has their arm around Jinger but they have been cropped out of the picture.
Does anyone else see that or just me?
It's a group shot in front of Ross dated 11/9/2014. I don't know how old the pic is though.

Do you think Steve would allow one of his daughters (say Mary) to marry a Duggar boy?
He would get more publicity for his products but I think he feels the Duggars aren't as religious as he is (is anyone?!)

I have a question. Why do some of you insist that the adults (specifically Jana Duggar and Sarah Maxwell) NEED to be rescued by men in order to be happy? Whether most want to accept it or not, Jana Duggar (24 years old) and Sarah Maxwell(30 something) ARE adult women living in America. Jana Duggar,24, is far less isolated than Sarah Maxwell and Jana has regular contact with Amy. If Jana was so unhappy and really wanted to leave, she would. It also is bothersome that some people here insist that these adult women NEED to be rescued by men marrying them. I think it is very ironic that FreeJinger is against what some, claim are backward ideals of the Duggars that pose a threat to feminism yet insist that the only way these adult women can escape is by having men marry them. Isn't that the same backwards thinking that some of you are so against? Look at Jana Duggar. Some of you insist the only way that she can leave is by having a man marry her. This has gone to the extent of people starting a huge false rumor, "Tim Tebow and Jana are courting! Now she will finally be able to escape!" http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-new ... ys-2014612 . These rumors are harmful to Jana and I wish they would stop.