Make a negative a positive

So, I promised you a new beginnings blog in my last post. Unfortunately, my new beginnings excitement seems to have been dampened a little by some potentially bad news. But instead of moping about the fact that something I really wanted might not be coming to fruition (for now) I decided to challenge myself to a bucket list (not quite an accurate title) for the year instead.

So I applied, rather last minute, to return to university this September. Having studied a degree I enjoyed, but was ultimately useless for my undergraduate degree (the only thing I really learnt was my drinking limits, and how to spend a lot of money very quickly), and my postgraduate degree made me realise what a studying experience should really be like. I decided to take a year off, having been at the same university for 4 years.

I had all but planned that I would return to university before I even completed my postgraduate course to convert all my hard work in the form of a GDL (Graduate Diploma in Law) and try to specialise and become a media law solicitor. But I thought, to make sure it was what I wanted, I’d take a year out, work out if I really wanted to spend another few years in university.

A year later, and I’ve seen the job market. I’m simultaneously over qualified and under qualified. I have 2 degrees, but no experience in anything, except how to pour a pint and how to sell overpriced popcorn. So returning to university to come out qualified for a real job felt like a dream. So a little late in the day I had this realisation and applied to return to university, not to the same university as before either… an actual Russell Group university… the sort of university that was way too good for me 5 years ago when I filled out my first UCAS application.

I started a conversation via email with the course lecturers to make sure I was eligible, and once I was told yes, I applied… sort of. I had doubts, and second thoughts, and ended up applying much later. I have now been contacted, since all my references are in, that there may not actually be a place available for me this year.

I was so excited, thinking I was starting again. I’m moving into a different flat, and starting university at the same time, after some of what I’ve experienced this year, felt like the new page I really needed. But now I might not be able to do what I want? Do I act like a toddler and throw my toys out my pram? Or do I accept that I made a mistake, and form a plan b? It’s time I realise I’m not 4, but rather 24. So I got on that plan b.

Sure I’m moving into this new flat, and that’s a new page enough. Think of the stress (my moving in date is 30th August, and term starts on 2nd September) of moving and starting uni within a week… I’m not 19 anymore. I’m a mature student now. And so I can’t start the course this year because of a lack of places… doesn’t mean I can’t get my application in for next year.

So what can I do with this year to ensure I don’t totally waste my time? I came up with a 5 point list. No need to over stretch myself, but I can do some things I’ve been wanting to do for a while:

1. Start learning German

I saw this programme on TV the other day while I was clicking through my TiVo to watch New Girl, and Germany is the second oldest population in the world. That means, the current working generations will not be able to support the older generations in the next 10-15 years… they’re desperate for workers. Learn German and become a media solicitor over there? No problem. Perhaps I can meet my own Christoph Waltz there and live happily ever after (I sort of was banking on moving to Vienna, but I can change my plan to Berlin).

2. Take my jewellery to 5 stalls/markets.

I’ve been making my own jewellery for over a year now. I’m yet to sell a single piece to someone who isn’t friend or family. I intended last Christmas to hit up a few Christmas markets, but bottled it. This year, well, let’s just say, it could be my year.

3. Help at my church youth club.

Not so little known fact about me? I hate children… it’s more of a fear of the unknown. My mum can’t stop talking about wanting grandchildren. There’s nothing I want less than to go through labour. But I guess, I can hang out with some kids. Apparently, they think my job is cool. At least that’s a conversation opener.

4. Write a law essay.

Well, I still want to study law, so I might as well make a jump start. I bought a tonne (quite literally) of law books from a charity shop a few weeks ago. So I don’t want them to go to waste for a year.

5. Make 1 item of clothing.

I bought a sewing machine on Groupon. I wanted it to improve some of my more… “designer” jewellery pieces, but I’m sure I could make a skirt or something… (I was useless at textiles in school).

I haven’t even been told I can’t do the course that starts this September, but I wanted to make sure I hadn’t put all my eggs in one basket. I still have hope that I can study this September, but it’s OK if I can’t.