Not Exactly the Joy of Cooking

Try as I may, I hate to cook. It is an all-out chore that I do not enjoy. I can cook and obviously from the looks of me, I don't go hungry, but I hate cooking. Baking is pure bliss and dishes I don't mind, but cooking is just difficult.My mother is Italian. She can cook just about anything from wild game to a scrumpti...

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By Erin Pennington

The Carmi Times - Carmi, IL

By Erin Pennington

Posted Feb. 8, 2013 at 5:00 PM

By Erin Pennington

Posted Feb. 8, 2013 at 5:00 PM

Try as I may, I hate to cook. It is an all-out chore that I do not enjoy. I can cook and obviously from the looks of me, I don't go hungry, but I hate cooking. Baking is pure bliss and dishes I don't mind, but cooking is just difficult.

My mother is Italian. She can cook just about anything from wild game to a scrumptious ham, but I did not inherit her skill. She knows how to mix spices, when to include wine, what vegetable goes best with the meat, and how to make a beautiful and delicious dessert. She can cook for five or 25 and the food will be a feast!

When I first got married at the age of 22, I would call her and say, "Mom how do you fix..." She would try to tell me the best that she could, but she would offer tips like "just take it out when it looks done" or "put in a pinch of this or a dab of that." When you don't know how much a "pinch" is or what it is "supposed" to look like, you are at a loss.

To complicate matters even more, my father and brothers expect everything to be as good as Mom's. If it is not, they will be the first to tell you (my family does not hold back). Once when I lived at home I made my dad some oatmeal raisin cookies, his favorite. He took them hunting with him in the tin I prepared. When he got home he said, "Boy Sissy, those cookies you made were fantastic!" By this point I was beaming with pride. He continued with, "They were so hard I threw them at the rabbits and hit them in the head with them! I knocked out five!"

I tried to bring a pie to Thanksgiving once. I used a frozen crust, which I thawed and filled just like the directions said. I baked it and it looked beautiful. Finally! I could bring something everyone would like. My brothers dug in and said, "Hey, what's this filmy stuff in the bottom?" I didn't understand. Apparently there was wax paper filler in the bottom that I didn't see and baked it right into the pie.

The worst thing that ever happened was when my daughter turned five I tried to serve a meal at her birthday party. I made homemade meatballs, which everyone loves. I didn't put them on early enough and when my family showed up they weren't done. My youngest brother said, "Anyone want some of Erin's botulism surprise??"

Over the years I have improved. However, when I am responsible for a meal I find that it is easier to have the meat catered, while I prepare the side dishes and desserts. It works out best that way. I always say that if I can just find a man that grills...I'll have it made. After all, even I can't mess up a salad and cake.