Two Songs from the Upcoming Musical: Mysterious Island

The script for Mysterious Island, the musical film which I've been working on re-telling the 2001 story, is well underway, and I've put together these two songs together for your viewing pleasure. One of them, He is Makuta, fits in the part of the script that this sneak preview features, and the other, Oh Jala, is the first in the script, being sung in the second scene of the film. Please enjoy the songs. Also, please give feedback on one or both of the songs if you have the time; I'd appreciate any tips to help to make Mysterious Island better. As a small side note, you can expect the first chapter of the script to be online in the short stories forum on this site by this next Saturday night.

Edited by Artakha's Nephew, May 20 2014 - 08:19 PM.

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I'm going to be busy with family matters for a while. Please be patient with responses to PMs, posts, etc.
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I can also be found under the username Azani on SolisMagna.com and the BioMediaProject forums. Check out SolisMagna.com, as it is exactly what we need to maintain interest in Bionicle. Also, I highly recommend Check out the script for Mysterious Island, an adaption/reboot of the 2001 Bionicle story which I am writing. It's also a musical.

I'm already quite a ways into the process of planning and writing a Bionicle musical, actually. Have you ever tried to make a Bionicle musical?

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I'm going to be busy with family matters for a while. Please be patient with responses to PMs, posts, etc.
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I can also be found under the username Azani on SolisMagna.com and the BioMediaProject forums. Check out SolisMagna.com, as it is exactly what we need to maintain interest in Bionicle. Also, I highly recommend Check out the script for Mysterious Island, an adaption/reboot of the 2001 Bionicle story which I am writing. It's also a musical.

Greetings, fellow Bionicle musical enthusiast! I feel you have an excellent start here; classical theatrical music patterns, jumps, and tempos, good lyrics and a strong, lovely voice. I would harp a bit on the microphone quality and the use of human allusions (IE 'damsel in distress'), but I know from personal experience that microphones are difficult to begin with and especially rough on theatrical-level singing, and the stylization of the lyrics is definitely up to the person writing them. What's important is that you have excellent foundations, and have actually written songs. Do you have some way of playing and recording instrumentals for these songs? Also, it's best to ensure that they are sung in keys good for your voice. For the most part they flowed well, but there were a couple points that sounded a tad high. Still, all in all, practice really does make perfect, even on the stickler notes. I am definitely keeping an eye on this project, and can't wait to see more of it! Is there anything you would like contributed aside from feedback?

Edited by Sidy, May 21 2014 - 10:30 PM.

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Did you know that insanity is contagious? I've been spreading it for years!

All hail Makuta Teridax that creepy guy to my right,Master of Shadows.

Ehe... for some reason I find this idea hilarious. But it makes sense for Bionicle. If I had to explain the plot to somebody who had never heard of Bionicle before, it would probably sound like a musical to start with

I support this. Are you still looking for musicians or composers? If so, feel free to PM me.