Japlish: It's two confusing languages in one!

I was
ordering a beer at one of my regular bars in Shimbashi last year, when the bartender leaned over and in a low voice said, “Excuse me,
but there’s a special event today, so it’s kyasshuon.”

Kyasshuon...? Cushion? Was I supposed to bring a cushion? Are people providing their own cushions at bars
these days?!

“What’s
kyasshuon?” I asked, bewildered. “Kyasshuon deribarii (キャッシュオンデリバリー),”
he explained, using the full English phrase. Ah, ha!

Cash on delivery.

Anticipating that the bar would be crowded for the event, they were asking customers to pay with
the “delivery” of each drink rather than settling their tabs at night's end. I broke out a 1,000 yen note and was rewarded with a pint of
delicious beer.

Cushion delivery

Rust in translation

Although kyasshuon deribarii is based on the English phrase, in practice it's much
different from its Western counterpart. Kyasshuon's (キャッシュオン) use
is limited to bars and restaurants, whereas “cash on delivery” refers
to a method of payment in which a delivery service, rather than the company that sells the product, collects the bill for a
purchase.

While C.O.D. purchases
are not common in English-speaking countries these days, in Japan
the practice is alive and well; it’s called daikin hikikae (代金引き換え)—not kyasshuon
deribarii—and is still used quite frequently, even for large purchases such
as televisions and other appliances.

There
is an array of Japanese words like kyasshuon that are based on foreign
(often English) words, but have very different meanings. They are called wasei-eigo
(和製英語)
or, more generally, wasei-gairaigo (和製外来語)—literally “English of Japanese
creation” or “foreign words of Japanese creation”—and they can create a
disconnect for Japanese people, as well as neophytes, who sometimes assume they have
the same meaning in their language of origin as they do in Japanese language, when they really do not.

Negotiating these words can be as important as learning complicated Chinese characters (kanji), sometimes
more so given the frequency with which you are likely to encounter them in
Japan.

Many of the words refer to basic roots. If you want ice
cream, you should ask for “ice” (aisu, アイス); frozen water is actually called kōri (氷) in Japanese. Jeans
are “G-pan” (jiipan, ジーパン), the "pan" deriving from "pants" (pantsu). And “concent” (based on “concentric
plug;” konsento, コンセント)
is the Japanese word for a power outlet, which locals wrongly assume all English speakers will innately understand.

Linguistic pleasures

Other examples of Japlish
are used to translate relatively modern phenomena. If you’re staying at a
Japanese hotel, you should ask for a “morning call” (mōningu kōru, モーニングコール) instead of a
wake-up call.

Small and mid-sized Japanese concert venues are referred to as
“live houses” (raibu hausu, ライブハウス). And Velcro is colloquially referred to
as “magic tape” (majikku teepu, マジックテープ).

And
then there are those phrases that yield such inherent linguistic pleasure—a
result of either the sound or the strangeness of the new word—that all
students of Japanese should be familiar with them. A recent personal hobby is
often referred to as “my boom” (mai būmu, マイブーム), most likely arising from a explosion in the popularity of something fashionable.

Advertising copy
is referred to as “catch copy” (kyatchi kopī, キャッチコピー). “Nighter” (naitaa,
ナイター)
is Japanese for a sports game played at night. And a word that puts the “fun” in fundoshi (traditional Japanese underwear) is
“classic pants” (kurashikku pantsu, クラシックパンツ).

Although
many of these words tickle foreigners funny bones as they discover them, today they're just as Japanese as any other word in the language.

Daniel Morales is a writer and translator living in Tokyo. He writes in English about Japanese at howtojaponese.com and in Japanese about English at howtoengrish.com. He also blogs for the Japan Times at Japan Pulse.