Monthly Archives: March 2011

I have recently received a number of emails asking me why I rarely seem to blog about football these days. It is after all the subject of most of my books and given that the bulk of the content is forged from my opinions, it is reasonable to expect that I will have comments to make on most things relating to the great game and that a blog is the perfect place to put them.

There is however, a significant difference between the two. Yes, I know I’ve written entire volumes which amount to little more than a series of rants about this or that but books take time to research and construct and even longer to make the leap from my laptop to the shelves in Waterstones. Blogs are more instantaneous and as such, the risk to both my blood pressure and my bank balance are immeasurably greater. After all, I am knocking on a bit and I’ve almost been sued twice for things I’ve put in books and they were viewed by lawyers before they went into print! I can have a blog online in seconds so who knows what trouble that could get me into!!!

As a consequence and in a rare fit of common sense, I realised long ago that if I’m going to rant about anything in my blog, it needs to be about things into which I can try to inject either some humour or some sarcasm. Possibly even both. That isn’t to say that whatever I write isn’t genuine or heartfelt because in the main, it will be but if I’m going to do it, it’ll only be because I enjoy it.

That’s the problem I have with blogging about football. For there is so much about the great game which just simply pisses me off that I fear that at my age, my meagre brain would go into meltdown if I went off on one about it. Call me old-fashioned, but life as a gibbering wreck doesn’t hold much of an appeal.

For example, everyone knows that football has been destroyed by greed, that agents are vermin and that most players seemingly have little in the way of morals or basic intelligence. Furthermore, a significant number would almost certainly be working in MacDonald’s or languishing in prison if things had gone slightly differently for them.

On top of that, anyone with an ounce of intellect knows that the majority of football fans are so blinded by passion and loyalty that they allow their clubs to treat them in a way which would have you calling Watchdog if Tesco’s tried it. I could go on, but I am sure you get my drift.

And so as a consequence, these days I tend to dismiss everything which doesn’t happen on the field of play no matter how ridiculous or outlandish it might be as being well, sadly typical whilst anything which happens on the field is largely irrelevant because if it doesn’t involve my beloved Watford, I don’t really care anyway.

There may of course be odd occasions where I won’t be able to help myself. In fact, when I heard news that the odious John Terry had been reappointed as England captain and was busily giving it the large one to sections of the media about how harshly he’d been treated in the past, I not only almost vomited but started to reach for a keyboard.

But those occasions will be few and far between. Football has after all, become a parody of itself these days and there are only so many ways you can say that without it getting boring.

Besides, there are so many more fun things to blog about these days. Oh yes indeed.

I have recently received a number of emails asking me why I rarely seem to blog about football these days. It is after all the subject of most of my books and given that the bulk of the content is forged from my opinions, it is reasonable to expect that I will have comments to make on most things relating to the great game and that a blog is the perfect place to put them.

There is however, a significant difference between the two. Yes, I know I’ve written entire volumes which amount to little more than a series of rants about this or that but books take time to research and construct and even longer to make the leap from my laptop to the shelves in Waterstones. Blogs are more instantaneous and as such, the risk to both my blood pressure and my bank balance are immeasurably greater. After all, I am knocking on a bit and I’ve almost been sued twice for things I’ve put in books and they were viewed by lawyers before they went into print! I can have a blog online in seconds so who knows what trouble that could get me into!!!

As a consequence and in a rare fit of common sense, I realised long ago that if I’m going to rant about anything in my blog, it needs to be about things into which I can try to inject either some humour or some sarcasm. Possibly even both. That isn’t to say that whatever I write isn’t genuine or heartfelt because in the main, it will be but if I’m going to do it, it’ll only be because I enjoy it.

That’s the problem I have with blogging about football. For there is so much about the great game which just simply pisses me off that I fear that at my age, my meagre brain would go into meltdown if I went off on one about it. Call me old-fashioned, but life as a gibbering wreck doesn’t hold much of an appeal.

For example, everyone knows that football has been destroyed by greed, that agents are vermin and that most players seemingly have little in the way of morals or basic intelligence. Furthermore, a significant number would almost certainly be working in MacDonald’s or languishing in prison if things had gone slightly differently for them.

On top of that, anyone with an ounce of intellect knows that the majority of football fans are so blinded by passion and loyalty that they allow their clubs to treat them in a way which would have you calling Watchdog if Tesco’s tried it. I could go on, but I am sure you get my drift.

And so as a consequence, these days I tend to dismiss everything which doesn’t happen on the field of play no matter how ridiculous or outlandish it might be as being well, sadly typical whilst anything which happens on the field is largely irrelevant because if it doesn’t involve my beloved Watford, I don’t really care anyway.

There may of course be odd occasions where I won’t be able to help myself. In fact, when I heard news that the odious John Terry had been reappointed as England captain and was busily giving it the large one to sections of the media about how harshly he’d been treated in the past, I not only almost vomited but started to reach for a keyboard.

But those occasions will be few and far between. Football has after all, become a parody of itself these days and there are only so many ways you can say that without it getting boring.

Besides, there are so many more fun things to blog about these days. Oh yes indeed.

As you may or may not have noticed, the level of work I’ve been putting into my blog in recent weeks has slowed to what can only be described as pathetic.

In my defence, to say life has been manic of late would be an understatement as I’ve had various producers champing at my creative backside in an effort to secure either revisions or my services.

Not that I am ungrateful of course, but sometimes, I do wish I had half-decent time management skills or better still, the ability to say NO to people who are being, for want of a better word, twats.

Indeed, it’s fair to say that one of the worst things about being a writer is that you are usually the first link in the creative chain of a project and the last one to get either paid or recognised. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve made the point to people that without writers, there would be no…… well, anything. Yet as a breed, we are quite possibly the most frequently shafted group within any creative field.

I’m not sure quite how we have allowed ourselves to end up like this but it is certainly something I’m keen to change even if it is only for my own sanity.

However, in the meantime I will do my utmost to update my blog on a more regular basis not least because I have a few things I really do need to get off my chest.

As you may or may not have noticed, the level of work I’ve been putting into my blog in recent weeks has slowed to what can only be described as pathetic.

In my defence, to say life has been manic of late would be an understatement as I’ve had various producers champing at my creative backside in an effort to secure either revisions or my services.

Not that I am ungrateful of course, but sometimes, I do wish I had half-decent time management skills or better still, the ability to say NO to people who are being, for want of a better word, twats.

Indeed, it’s fair to say that one of the worst things about being a writer is that you are usually the first link in the creative chain of a project and the last one to get either paid or recognised. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve made the point to people that without writers, there would be no…… well, anything. Yet as a breed, we are quite possibly the most frequently shafted group within any creative field.

I’m not sure quite how we have allowed ourselves to end up like this but it is certainly something I’m keen to change even if it is only for my own sanity.

However, in the meantime I will do my utmost to update my blog on a more regular basis not least because I have a few things I really do need to get off my chest.

As anyone who follows me on Twitter will know, I am a huge fan. To me it’s a great source of both news and amusement as well as being a fantastic way to promote my books and well, what I do. Most importantly for me at least, it’s a great way to interact with readers […]

As some of you may be aware, a movement called The Football Lads Alliance has sprung up from within the supporting world. Formed in the wake of the London Bridge atrocity on June 7th to protest at the lack of direct action being taken to counter extremism in the UK, it grew rapidly to the […]

I shall, from the outset, put my cards on the table and say that I am, at least numerically speaking, old. I don’t feel it mind (and I certainly don’t act it) but it is fair to say that at 58 I’m much closer to my closing scene than I am to the opening act. […]

I recently made the comment that the difference between being an author and being a screenwriter is the same as the difference between an immaculate conception and an egg donation. This seemed to cause some confusion in certain circles although as someone who writes both novels and scripts, it seems to me to be a totally […]

I have recently been in Belarus. Am amazing country full of amazing people. This is not however, an attempt to boost the tourism trade of a former Eastern Bloc nation. It is rather, a wake up call. For whilst in the wonderful city of Brest, I had just that. You see shortly before I left […]

I first posted the following blog in the spring of 2012, the year that footballer Andre Gray posted a series of homophobic tweets which saw him spread across the sports pages of the British press. You would hope that things would have changed in recent years but last night, as I watched the Gareth Thomas […]

As someone who is lucky enough to converse with people from pretty much every point of the spectrum on which human life sits, I frequently find myself responding to questions of some kind or another. Inevitably, the bulk of these will revolve around subjects linked to writing and be of the ‘how can I?’ variety […]

Yesterday, in response to some of the madness that has been tricking out into the public domain lately, I posted the first half of my 50 policies that I would adopt were I to be placed in charge of this once great country. You can read this by clicking here. However, before I post the remaining […]

As anyone who knows me or reads my blogs on a regular basis will know, I am a huge advocate of something that has seemingly become old-fashioned in this modern age. It’s called common sense. And it’s demise has not simply weakened this country, it’s made it a laughing-stock. I know, for example, that coffee […]

My first four books are now available via Amazon for under £5.00! Just click on the photo above to go to the link. In other news, apologies for the lack of any blogs recently but I’ve been flat out on a new script. Normal service will be resumed ASAP! The post Classic hooligan series available […]