Tuesday, 28 April 2015

The Last Virgin Standing

[This is a guest post from a friend of mine - I wanted my blog to appeal to a wide range of people and so she was happy to share her experience. This post is about the struggle of being the last virgin out of your group of friends, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did! NJS x]

I'm the girl that always goes there but never goes all the way. I'm 19 and I'm a virgin. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with that, but when you're the last virgin standing you can start to feel a little left out. In younger years it felt like a race to see who could lose it first. But as I've matured - (yes, I know 19 not's that old!) I've come to realise that it really does not matter when I choose to give it up.

At school, lunch time gossip used to be about discussing Justin Bieber's hair and our favourite boy band members. But one by one my friends dropped like flies as they gave their innocence away to their cherub face boyfriends, and the lunch time gossip soon turned into a Cosmo inspired talk about favourite sex positions and blowjob tips. Suddenly the pressure to lose my v-card was on.

All though I've never had a boyfriend and I've never gone all the way I've had my fair share of sexual partners. Most of my friends judge me for this, because even though they've all gone further than me, I've never been bound to just one man. Sometimes this can you put down and it can make you feel cheap. However, I have come to realise that being promiscuous is something that you should never feel you have to be ashamed of. Every sexual partner I've had has been of my own consent and I can honestly say, I've had fun!

So you may be wondering why I am the last virgin standing. I've had plenty of opportunity, but never taken it. Why is this the case? I can't give you a completely whole answer, because I'm still not quite sure myself. Maybe's it's because I'm too scared, heard too many first time horror stories or because of the judgment I might receive. I think the real reason however, is that I don't want to give it up to just anyone. Sex is a very intimate, and to me a special thing. I don't want to be drunk when I loose it and only remember fragments of the night, I don't want to be taken advantage of and I don't want to wake up regretting the night before or not knowing if I'll see the guy again. But I do want to have sex with someone I trust, somebody that makes me feel comfortable and somebody I know won't hurt me.

So if you're the last virgin standing, don't feel like you have to rush to the finish line. Sex is something that you should explore at your own pace. Don't let anybody make you feel ashamed of being a virgin whether it's because of your values, religion or simply your personal choice - girl or boy! If the person you're with or thinking of losing it to is bothered by this, show them the door - because they're not worth it.

[Thanks for reading! - Share your experiences and opinions of the subject below! Want to contribute to Not Just Sex yourself? Email your story to notjustsex@outlook.com - All stories will remain anonymous unless you state otherwise! NJS x]