I bought it last year to serve as a hub for classic games once it became clear that the Ouya was an underpowered laggy mess with awful emulation software. But it turns out the Mac’s controller lag is worse. Plus I failed to index my Wii Virtual Console library. Everything I want to play is already there and lag-free through a Classic Controller.

So let’s turn it into a media server, right? I can browse the web from the couch and… realize how bad of an idea that is. All the modern game consoles do that nowadays, plus web surfing on the couch is best done through an iPad. Oh but surely I can use it to serve videos… which I never watch because Netflix is faster and more convenient. I do all my encoding in h.264 so I don’t need to serve any exotic codecs. Fine then, I’ll make it a web server… pointless since I do all my development on a MacBook Pro and have a perfectly fine web host already. I guess I’ll make it a backup server… also not happening as I’m the Reformat King of America. It could be a great Minecraft server… if I still played Minecraft.

Hmm. No games, no videos, no websites. I don’t do torrents and it’s laughably slow for bitcoins. All my productivity software is on the MacBook.