Xenu Smut Articles

I love the Mission: Impossible Rogue Nation trailer that Sarah posted yesterday – click here for a refresher. As she wrote, it’s pure ridiculous action movie fun. It knows exactly what it is. It doesn’t aim to be anything more. And Tom Cruise’s level of frustration when he delivers the final line – “the other door!” – is perfect. Full Story

Remember when Katie Holmes was a ninja? How she left Tom Cruise without Tom Cruise knowing? Secret cell phones and lawyers undercover and a new security team, all in place well before she blindsided him: I’m leaving you.
Then it was every day paps with Suri in New York, part protection and part promotion. Full Story

Depending on who you talk to. Last week, The Hollywood Reporter stated that production on Mission: Impossible 5 shut down for a week while a mysterious unnamed writer worked over the finale to provide the film with a better ending. But, on the same day as THR’s report, M:I5 director Christopher McQuarrie tweeted from the set, indicating that production was ongoing, if it had ceased at all. Full Story

After screening at Sundance, HBO has released the first trailer for Going Clear, the documentary about Scientology. There are no faces. Just voices. And reviews from major media outlets. And images of… machinery. Machines for minds. Machines for brainwashing?
And words like the ones in the title. Full Story

You know how that meadow is a big f-cking deal to Twi-Hards?
Well f-ck off Twi-Hards, because Tom Cruise meadowed first!
So you’ve heard about Going Clear? The new HBO Scientology documentary that premiered at Sundance? Word is HBO assembled a team of 160 lawyers to cover their asses so that they could go ahead and make this movie. Full Story

If you haven’t already, you have to read the New York Times interview with Willow, 14, and Jaden, 16, Smith. It’s a mind f-ck. It’s such a mind f-ck that I don’t know even know how to analyse it. Except to say that for all that the Smith family does to directly address speculation that they’re heavily involved in Scientology, you have to wonder what part Scientology has played in their development. Full Story

The Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre celebrated its 45th anniversary on Saturday. I just… I can’t…
We can’t talk about Michael Pena.
So let’s focus instead on John Travolta who was there with Kelly Preston, because they’re always there, because when they’re not there he ends up, well, you know, getting a massage. Full Story

Earlier this week, ScreenRant posted an article about the proposed Top Gun sequel and a possible plot:
Drones.
He’s the grizzled veteran in a world where pilots are dinosaurs. But wait! Can computers really fly planes and out-maneuver the bogeys? Of course not. Full Story

This happened the other day in Clearwater, Florida. Xenu opened a big ass church. Thousands of people showed up for the dedication of the $145 million development project, including the 377,000 square-foot Flag Building, the tallest in the city…including Tom Cruise, John Travolta, and Kelly Preston. Full Story

More information from that deposition is being leaked. In case you missed it, Tom Cruise is suing IN TOUCH for saying he abandoned Suri. Click here for my initial post about it last week. During the deposition, in addition to blaming Scientology for his alleged estrangement from his daughter, the magazine’s lawyers suggested that Tom was so disconnected from Suri that he went to Cameron Diaz’s birthday party instead of being with his child. Full Story

Tom Cruise is suing IN TOUCH for calling him a sh-tty father. IN TOUCH’s publisher Bauer Media is fighting back and details from the deposition from their legal proceedings have been leaked to Radar Online. They asked him about Scientology and the impact it had on Suri. Full Story

The original JT. Because in this business, Justin Timberlake can’t be the only one with those initials. Before he sang and danced, there was John Travolta who sang and danced. And now John Travolta is on the set of his new movie The Forger in Boston working a new head of thick hair. It’s streaked with grey, sure, but look at those waves, look at that texture. Full Story

As reported yesterday, on Monday’s episode of Dancing With The Stars, Leah Remini revealed that the Church Of Scientology was “looking for me to fail” on the show so that they could hahaha her in front of all their other members, like that would be the consequence of breaking up with Xenu. Click here for a refresher. Leah Remini has never been more famous. But, you know, I’m not sure those people understand logic.

They certainly don’t understand much about public relations. Because in response to Leah’s comments, the Church released this statement:

“We know this may come as a surprise to someone as self-absorbed as Ms. Read Full Intro