Joel Gaslin Media

Episode 14 – Tyson Sharpe – Emotional Fitness Coach

If you’ve ever struggled with breaking through, fear or self -doubt, this episode of the Cognified Marketing and Selling Podcast is for you. Tyson Sharpe Emotional Fitness Coach was a fun guest to have on the show.

Tyson Sharpe – Emotional Fitness Coach

Like many of us in our younger days, Tyson Sharpe wondered what he wanted to do. He got a University Degree, became a certified Robbins-Madanes Instructor and is now putting his talents to work helping others.

What You’ll Learn in this Episode

How to respond instead of reacting

Thoughts and strategies around discipline

Why Tyson thinks that life, in general, is a game and how he uses that to help people.

As always, thanks for listening to the Cognified Marketing and Selling Podcast. If you want to be notified of when new episodes come up, either subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, Google Play or fill out the form below.

Narrator: [00:00] Welcome to the "Cognified Marketing and Selling" podcast, where we share interviews, stories, strategies, and even a few rants with doctors, marketers, and sales reps that are in the trenches. People just like you. We'll explore ideas, discuss technologies, and learn how to market and sell smarter.
[00:15] Now, from Minneapolis, Minnesota, here's your host, Joel Gaslin.
Joel Gaslin: [00:19] Welcome to episode 14. My guest today is Tyson Sharpe. Tyson is a mindfulness coach from Australia. I first got connected with Tyson on Facebook. It was really interesting, the way we formed a quick friendship.
[00:30] I really admire the way he works with people to help them overcome difficult circumstances, talks about resiliency, and talks a lot about the importance of mindset in success and achieving your goals. Tyson, thanks a lot for being on the show today. Tell us a little bit about your background, please.
Tyson Sharpe: [00:46] Thanks, Joel. Thanks for having me on. Basically, I call myself an emotional fitness coach. What I do is I basically coach online entrepreneurs who are growing their business, mostly digital marketers, that sort of realm. They come to me when they basically have their business strategies in place, but something's still holding them back.
[01:06] At some level, they know something's happening within their head, within their mind that's holding them back from fear and holding them back because of doubts and frustrations and overwhelm. They know that it's within themselves that's holding them back.
[01:20] That's where they come to me to understand a bit more about how they can build what I call "emotional resourcefulness" within them so they tackle any challenges that come their way and they continue moving forward.
Joel: [01:32] That's great. How did you get started doing that?
Tyson: [01:34] After six years of university, like everyone I had no idea what I wanted to do. [laughs] I was a master procrastinator back then, so instead of making a decision, I traveled to Canada. [laughs] I traveled Canada for two years.
Joel: [01:48] Really? I live in Minnesota, and we're kind of South Canada. It would be unusual that someone would say, "I'm gonna travel to Canada for two years." It's interesting. How did you choose Canada?
Tyson: [01:57] Being Australian, it's actually quite common. [laughs] You go to all the ski fields in Canada, and it's filled with Australians. Absolutely crazy. They have an Australian problem there.
[02:09] [laughter]
Tyson: [02:09] To answer your question, I got into a lot of personal development over there once I felt a bit lost in my life and I didn't know which direction to go in. I got into a lot of personal development, did a few online courses to do with mindset and all that different thing.
[02:22] Once I started making the changes within myself, my passion was to learn the tools and strategies of how to make that change in someone else and help them move forward. I started doing a lot of online coaching programs, a lot of NLP study, a couple of courses down.
[02:40] I started about two and half years ago and I've coached over 130 entrepreneurs now.
[02:45] That's how I got started and, like a lot of people in the profession, learned by their mistakes, learned the tools and strategies, but also learned how to coach one-on-one with someone and understand them at a different level. That's how I got started.
Joel: [03:00] That's great. What's your favorite coaching situation you find yourself in these days?
Tyson: [03:06] That's a good question. When someone comes to me and they've got the perfect strategy in front of them. They've gone through the business courses. They've got the courses online. They know which funnels to build. They know which niche to go towards. They know how to do their direct outreach strategies.
[03:21] Then they just can't seem to move forward. Something happens within them, and they get to the point where they're like, "Well, I know it has to be me, because I haven't got results for 3, 6, 9, 12 months, but I've got the proven system in front of me. Something has to be happening inside my head."
[03:39] That's when I love digging deep and exploring what it is in terms of their thoughts and their emotions that's stopping them moving forward. That's the best case, because I've been there, too.
Joel: [03:49] We all have.
Tyson: [03:50] I'm sure with a lot of people, as well. That's really what I love exploring and love helping people do.
Joel: [03:54] How do you get started with that, Tyson? Do you have a system you use? How do you get going? When you identify a person a like this, you're getting started with them, and they've signed up to be one of your coaching clients, how do you help them get started?
Tyson: [04:05] Basically, I have a step-by-step process that I don't teach, but I use within a coaching strategy and I use within a coaching session. Basically, my first understanding is to understand their world, understand what's going on their head, understand where they are, who they are, where they want to go, and to dive in deeper on the thinking processes going on within their head.
[04:29] Once that happens, I can start to explore what it is within their thinking that leads to their emotions. One of the premises of being a coach is the understanding that it's not your circumstances or your life events that cause you to feel a certain way. It's always your thinking about those circumstances and events that cause a feeling.
[04:51] That's what I love exploring. First of all, when someone comes to me and they're struggling, I love to dive in deeper on what it is specifically that they're thinking, whether it's, "I don't have enough clients. I don't have enough money. I'm broke. I'm not good enough at some level."
[05:05] Those thoughts I need to understand. They need to realize in their own head that it's just thoughts, so they gain some awareness on why they're feeling the way they're feeling. Then we can start building the emotional fitness within them, so they can move forward.
Joel: [05:21] That's great. Marcus Aurelius, the great Roman emperor once said that a man becomes what he thinks about all day long.
Tyson: [05:29] Absolutely.
Joel: [05:30] That what you think about is important. How do you help people learn to respond as compared to react?
Tyson: [05:36] Basically, it's an understanding of having a practice of writing your thoughts down. I'm not sure if you've done this, but when you write your thoughts down, it gets you into a bit of an awareness where it separates your thoughts from the facts.
[05:55] If you can put down on paper everything that's going on in your head, you basically start to see your brain on paper. [laughs]
[06:02] You can start to think and observe from an outside perspective and say, "Man, anyone who would have these thoughts would be feeling this way. It's no wonder I'm...It's no wonder I'm not getting results when I've got thoughts of, you know, 'I'm not good enough. I don't know enough yet.' Thoughts of, 'I'm stuck, I'm lost, I'm confused,' are all thoughts."
[06:19] Obviously, they're going to lead to certain emotions of disempowerment. You can never take action from that place. I understand from simple stepping back and saying, "Well, anyone who would have these thoughts would feel this way. It's not just me, it's just my brain."
Joel: [06:37] One of the things you talk about on your website is you talk about discipline. Tell me about your thoughts and your strategies around discipline.
Tyson: [06:43] Discipline's a big one for people. A lot of entrepreneurs come to me and they're like, "You know what? I'm stuck with these results that I haven't been getting, and I can't move forward and I really just wanna, you know, increase my discipline and focus."
"[06:56] If I increase my discipline and focus and I can execute on my own daily tasks to move my business forward, then I'd have this amount of clients. I'd have this amount of income. I'd have this amount of freedom." They can see that. It's doing the daily discipline.
[07:11] I like to use my coaching and emotional fitness skills to help people realize that executing on a task is more to do with the emotions you feel most often. The resourceful emotions that you feel will dictate the resourceful action moving forward.
[07:28] We all know when we're stressed and frustrated, we can't fight our way out of a paper bag. [laughs] Your brain doesn't work like that. Your brain literally operates differently when you experience different emotions.
[07:40] When you're passionate, when you're determined, when you're insightful about something, there's nothing you can't solve. There's no insight you can't have. There's no perspective change that won't come your way. You're thinking resourcefully, and you're feeling resourcefully.
[07:52] That's what I encourage my clients to practice and condition in their body so that their daily discipline can be one of practice and one of more fun and stretching themselves in who they can become and who they want to be and grow in that aspect rather than thinking, "This is a daily chore. It's a daily task. I don't know if I can do it. I didn't get around to doing it," all those different things.
Joel: [08:17] You gamify it a little bit in some way?
Tyson: [08:21] Yeah. I think life is a game in general. You would have seen in your life that in terms of being a sales rep that you have your ups and downs. [laughs] If you don't have a specific outlook on that, then it can get the best of you.
[08:34] If you have the thoughts and the meanings that everything that is coming your way is a challenge to help you grow, like you said, it makes it more of a game. You're more likely to respond rather than react.
Joel: [08:48] It's interesting. I guess it was about nine years ago, I went through a period in my life where I had a break-up with a guy that I worked with for a long time and some people that I worked with. It was a rough period in my life. I wrote an article that I submitted to "Success Magazine" to be published.
[09:06] It was called, "10 Things I Learned When I Was Knocked From My White Horse." Lo and behold, they accepted it, and they put it up on their blog. It was shared, I think, 45,000 times on Facebook from their blog.
[09:18] That topic of resiliency and getting up from struggles resonates with a lot of people. At least in my experience it does. That experience where I wrote that and it was shared so many times seemed to validate that.
Tyson: [09:31] What did you make that mean when you broke up with that partner and it was a rough period? What thoughts did you have about it that made you so resilient?
Joel: [09:41] For me, Tyson, I had to focus on gratitude. I had to look at it and say, "OK, what's good about this that I can use?" I had to pay attention to a lot of different things that were happening around me at the time. I had four kids that were...
[09:55] I still have four kids and a wife who luckily I'm still with. We still love each other. My kids still love me. That was always true throughout the whole thing.
[10:03] I had to keep that in mind, yet what was true is they were watching to see how I was going to respond. I could have crawled into my shell and felt sorry for myself. It was easy to start sometimes saying, "Jeez, I should have done this or I should have done that."
[10:15] That was just so unproductive because it didn't matter. I couldn't change what I had done or the decisions I'd made. At the time, I made what I thought were good decisions and they turned out to be not very good decisions. I had to live with the results.
[10:28] Every time I started getting down in the dumps, I'd be grateful for what I had. I grew up a hockey player. We're a hockey family. We always would yell the kids on the ice when they're playing hockey when they were getting down, "Keep moving your feet!"
[10:39] That's what I always tried to do is just keep moving my feet. Lo and behold, I moved on to the next thing. I was lucky enough that I had enough financial resources and came out of it with enough financial resources. I didn't have to do anything soon.
[10:53] I used it as a time to start a business and build a business. I ended up selling that business and still worked in ophthalmology. It turned out in the end as some people told me right away, they said, "Look, it's not going to mean anything to you right now, but this could be the greatest thing that ever happened to you."
[11:11] They were absolutely right. It was. I had to look at it that way and I did. It worked out. I'm very grateful for that.
Tyson: [11:17] It's a good example of how you can shift your focus.
Joel: [11:21] You talked about that shifting your identity. Is that what you're talking about? Tell me about that a little bit.
Tyson: [11:26] Sure. What a lot of people do when they're starting a business when they're getting to that next level of where they want to get to, they can see the results that they want. They visualize the results they want, they know clearly what they want, but they're thinking about it. The process can be backwards.
[11:43] They're like, "Once I get this result, I'll feel a certain way." [laughs] We've all been there. In my opinion, from what I study, is it's really backwards. That's because I use the metaphor that to get to a destination in a car, you got to fill it with gas. You got to fill it with gas at the start.
[12:00] It's similar if you want to get the results in your business. You need to fill up the car. You need to fill up the car with gas before you get there. But a lot of people are trying to get to the destination before they fill up the car.
[12:10] Filling up your car is basically the resourceful emotions that you're willing to feel more often because the resourceful emotions are what's going to drive you. It's what's going to be your fuel to get there. Does that make sense?
Joel: [12:24] Yes, I like it. The metaphor that I would like to think about is one I heard a long time ago. Back when I was an early sales rep, I used to listen to tapes from guys like Earl Nightingale and Zig Ziglar and all those guys, the names that maybe don't mean anything to you.
[12:39] I listened to them on cassette tapes [laughs] and that was what I liked to do. Earl Nightingale would always talk about how it just doesn't make any sense to a person where you sit in front of a wood-burning stove and you say, "Give me the heat and then I'll put it in the wood."
[12:55] It just doesn't work that way. You got to put the wood in and start the fire and then you get the heat, so I agree with you.
Tyson: [13:01] I like that metaphor. What I'm talking about with self-identity is that a lot of people are struggling to get there, but they're like, "Once I get that result, that'll be fine."
[13:09] This explains why some people can hustle and grind their way but still not see any results because if you shift just your action and just your goals, that's very conscious thinking. It only draws upon the resources of your conscious mind.
[13:25] What happens is when you do that, at some level you'll think that I'm not good enough at some level. Your unconscious brain will be fighting you every single step of the way if you don't become that person first.
[13:41] It's like if you don't shift your beliefs and self-identity at an unconscious level, then your brain's going to always fight you and fight against you because all your brain wants to do is remain consistent with how it sees itself, with how it views itself.
[13:58] Anyone who's studied psychology will understand that's the biggest force in the human psyche is to remain consistent with how you view yourself. If you view yourself as not good enough, your brain will just fight you to the death, basically, so that you can remain consistent with not being good enough.
[14:14] That's where the premise of if you tap into the coaching and the psychology of it and shift your identity at an unconscious level, your unconscious brain will be fighting for you and helping you achieve your goals rather than providing that resistance.
Joel: [14:30] How long does that process take?
Tyson: [14:31] It really depends where you're already thinking and how you can shift those beliefs. Some people just have small tweaks in terms of their thoughts, in terms of they think I'm not good enough. Then, I pried them on that.
[14:43] I say, "In what areas are you not good enough? What specifically you're not good enough? Is it tying your shoes or is it marketing?" [laughs] It doesn't take too long before they realize that they have the resources within them to achieve and that they've always achieved. That can be in a process of one session.
[15:01] Some other people can have all this evidence, have all these different beliefs that they're not good enough because of this, because of that, because of this, because of that. We need to go through their thoughts and their beliefs and almost chop them down one by one so that they can start to realize what they do have within them.
[15:20] Then, they can start moving forward with the emotional resourcefulness that they know they have inside of them.
Joel: [15:26] What do you think the most prevalent fears that people have are?
Tyson: [15:29] There's many different studies on this. I learned through my coaching programs, anyone who's taken the coaching on any programs from Tony Robbins will know he teaches there's two primary fears that we all have.
[15:40] One is the fear of not being enough. Not being good enough, not being smart enough, tall enough, athletic enough, rich enough, successful enough, funny enough. We all have a fear at some level of not being enough.
[15:52] For your listeners who are getting out there starting businesses and being professionals, for a lot entrepreneurs, that blueprint is the fear of not being successful enough. They have that drive to be successful and it's a beautiful thing, but it relays into the second fear that if I'm not enough, I won't be loved.
[16:08] I don't have time to go into explaining why that is. If you really go and dive deep into anyone's fears, you'll know that it's like all roads lead to Rome. It always leads to these two fears of not being enough and up and not being worthy of love.
[16:26] They're the primary fears that I like to use and I like to highlight it in my clients because once they understand that, then they can understand their brain at a different level. Although they fear like sailing, although they fear failure, although they fear making decisions, it all comes down to making mistakes, looking bad, and feeling like you're not enough.
[16:48] Unconsciously, not feeling enough means you're not worthy of love. Does that answer your question?
Joel: [16:53] It does. No, that's right. If someone asked me the question, similarly, I would have said you have to check off the first one, that I think the most prevalent fear of most people is the fear of death.
[17:03] We'll just leave that one out there and say that you got to have your way to deal with that because if you spend your time thinking about that, you probably have deeper issues that need to be dealt with.
[17:12] Yeah, you're right. I like the not being enough and I think all roads do lead to a fear of the lack of love in whatever form that may take. I did see that you went through the Tony Robbins training.
[17:23] He was my first, I would say...I want to don't say mentor because he wasn't really my...I really enjoyed his work in the early '90s. He was the first motivational event that I went to. He did one here in Minneapolis in October of 1991, which you probably weren't even born then.
Tyson: [17:41] [laughs] I was actually born in '89. I was two years old.
[17:45] [laughter]
Joel: [17:42] So you were little. It got me going as always being someone who was interested in motivation and mindset and the things that you're interested in, so that's really cool. I'm grateful that we connected.
Tyson: [17:55] What was the event? Was it Date with Destiny? Was it Unleash the Power Within?
Joel: [17:59] It was Unleash the Power Within.
Tyson: [18:02] That's really cool. Awesome event. I've been to both of those.
Joel: [18:06] Yeah, he was this big guy, slapping his chest all the time.
[18:09] [laughter]
Joel: [18:09] It was cool. I've always been a fan since then. I read a lot of his work. I have a question for you. How did you find me?
Tyson: [18:21] Basically, the world online is, everyone's connected. [laughs] Once I wanted to explore podcasting, I wanted to explore getting into being a guest, sharing my stories, or sharing some content, to benefit other people, I jumped in a few Facebook groups. Wanted to explore, see what niches people had, what type of podcast they had, and if I could offer any value.
[18:48] I jumped in one of the podcast Facebook groups and reached out to a few people in there who had a similar niche or who I think would share a similar passion with how we help and who we help. That's how we connected. I just reached out and said, "Hey, you know?" That's what happens.
Joel: [19:07] It was. Your name, I said, "I don't know who that person is." On LinkedIn, I have literally thousands of connections. I get connections requests from all kinds of people because of the line of work I'm in. I'm what I would call an open linker there. On Facebook, I generally don't, but yours came through. I was like, "That's kind of interesting."
[19:26] I started looking at what you did. I accepted it, and now here we are. I'm really grateful that you took that step. I'm grateful that we connected. I think you have a similar outlook on life to what I do.
Tyson: [19:38] Thanks, Joel. Yeah, always good to connect. Always good to jump out on the social medias and see what can happen. That's part of the world these days. You got to really take advantage of it.
Joel: [19:48] Yeah, you do. I'm 52 and you're 29. That's the fun part of things.
Tyson: [19:54] Yeah, absolutely.
Joel: [19:56] How do you want people to try and get in touch with you or go further? Anything more you'd like to talk about that we haven't talked about?
Tyson: [20:02] Joel, I could seriously talk about this stuff for three hours [laughs] because I love it. If anyone wants to reach out to me, my website is www.tysoncoaching.com. On there, we'll have all the links to my Facebook group and all these free resources for people to get some quick strategies and tips for some mindset boosts.
[20:19] There's a lot of different things I can talk about, but I want to dive down and deep into it.
Joel: [20:25] No, it's good. Let's end it here. Let's keep in touch. I'm anxious to see how things go for you. I think you'll do well. I'm grateful to have you on the show.
Tyson: [20:34] Awesome. Thanks for having me. I always appreciate people having me on and letting me share my story. Hopefully, I can provide some value for anyone listening that really wants to move forward in their business.
[20:46] I find that if you're the type of person that is listening to this stuff, you're serious about moving forward. I'm sure that's why people find you and all the benefits you're providing for people in terms of marketing, selling, and being serious about growing their business. I love providing those quick tips and understandings. Hopefully, people get value from it.
Joel: [21:03] That's great. All right, good luck, Tyson. Thanks.
Tyson: [21:09] Awesome. Thank you very much, Joel. Take care, buddy.
Joel: [21:10] You, too. Have a good night. Day, I guess, for you.
Tyson: [21:13] Bye-bye.
Joel: [21:13] See you.
Tyson: [21:14] [laughs] See you.
Joel: [21:15] That'll do it for another episode of the Cognified Marketing and Selling podcast. Thanks a lot for stopping by. If you like what you hear and you'd like to subscribe or even leave a review, I'd sure be grateful.
[21:24] You may find our feed on iTunes at Cognified Marketing and Selling podcast, again, on iTunes, or you may stop by the blog, joelgaslin.com. That's Joel, J-O-E-L, Gaslin, G-A-S-L-I-N, dot com. You can listen to it there and subscribe there, as well. Thanks again. Hope you're doing great.