Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Early Happy New Year to everyone! Tomorrow I'll be heading back home to celebrate. I didn't plan to go back home this weekend, but my cousin needs help moving. Besides, I still have no real friends up here.

Today my cousin and I were downtown getting lunch and we stopped into this cool little store. The have a lot of interesting things there, most of them made of different types of stone. As a gift, my cousin told me to pick out one of the pendulums I have been eying for months but never bought. I picked out this beauty.

I love it! I have been playing around with it since I got it. I think I have finally found my favorite divination tool. As much as I like that tarot deck I got, tarot is a bit difficult for me.

I wish I could say that things have been going well, but they haven't. One of my classes completely depresses me every time I have it. Everything this teacher tells us is telling me I don't have what it takes to make it in this field. That I just shouldn't be here. It feeds my doubts and fears. It's all I can do to not cry in the middle of class. I don't know what to do about it.

I have also just been down in general. As much as I really hate saying it, it was because of that boy I like. It makes me angry that I let something so stupid hurt me so much. It was definitely not a good experience for me. I opened up to someone and ended up hurt. Hopefully I can just learn something from it and move on.

The cherry on top is this stubborn cold I have. I'd really just like it to go away so I can try to have some fun this weekend. Or not, you know, whatever works for the rest of the universe.

Wow! Sorry to be such a downer. I'm going to shower and take some NyQuil.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

I'll be heading back to Montpelier in a few hours. I am riding up with my cousin because my car is in the shop. Something is wrong with the windshield wiper gears. It's a part that is going to cost over $100. That, plus the oil change and the inspection is going to cost me about $250! I am just lucky my cousin can bring me back up to school, no way I can drive around in the middle of winter without windshield wipers.

I am really glad to be going back to school. I love my family, but they drive me insane. A week home is more than enough. Especially with all this stress from moving into a new house and the holidays. I think I am going to come home less often. I feel as if I am missing out on something by not being on campus during the weekends. Plus it will give me a chance to be a bit more focused. When I'm home I don't have the chance to do homework if I have any.

I hope everyone had a happy holiday! We had a great time both Christmas Day and Christmas Eve. Lots of food, family, and laughs. My two big gifts were a GPS and an iPod adaptor for my car. Both of which I can't use until I get my car back! xD

Here's to hoping that things are a lot less complicated when I get back to school. It's unlikely, but I can hope. I'm sorry I have been posting so rarely!

Monday, December 21, 2009

Happy Yule everyone! I am wicked busy here at home with all the unpacking. I've been procrastinating on it a lot because I'd rather hang out with my friend for a few days before things get even crazier. They also stuck me with a bunch of homework that I need to work on at some point. I promised holiday cheer, though! And finally I have a picture of my new room. It is so unorganized right now.

Friday, December 18, 2009

I am alive! Just thought I'd post to let you all know that. I ended up going home last weekend, the roads were fine on my drive down. Unfortunately it started snowing like mad on my way back up. Just my luck, right? I am going home tonight after classes. We haven't had snow in a couple days so the roads are okay to drive on. My Christmas break is all next week!

My birthday was great! The best day I had all week in fact.

The reason I haven't been on is due to more confusing boy problems. They should be over soon. I'll just say that I let myself like a guy when I knew he didn't feel the same way. Stupid me.

Things will probably be close to back to normal when I get back to school. I don't want to be as shy as I was before all the boy issues, because that certainly wasn't helping me at all. I am trying to be more outgoing. The problem is I'm no good at it. And I'm scared of opening up to people and getting hurt.

I'll be sure to post some cheery holiday things when I'm home! Along with pictures of the house! A week away from classes is just what I need right now.

Edit from home: no cheery holiday stuff yet! Just this- that crazy boy drama may not go away after all. He says it isn't that he doesn't like me, it's that his plans for the future and my plans for the future are so different. He says it wouldn't be fair. I need to figure some stuff out.

Oh, and we're still not done moving stuff from the old house to the new house. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day with lots of cleaning and rearranging.

Friday, December 11, 2009

I am still loving my classes! Most of them are a ton of fun. I'm still working on trying to figure out a method for all the homework, especially the readings I have to do. I can't read the chapters two days before class and still remember them, but I hate procrastinating.

I am planning on celebrating my birthday this weekend! Technically it isn't until Monday, but I have plans for pizza and a movie to celebrate. That's if I ever get home! We got hit with at least a foot of snow in the past 3 days, and it's still coming. The road conditions are terrible and because I am such an inexperienced driver I do not plan to put myself in a situation where I could get into an accident. I am hearing stories from classmates about accidents on the highways, being pushed into a guardrail from the strong winds, and a half hour drive taking 1 1/2 hours. No thanks!!

My parents are moving into the new house this weekend. I'd like to be there to help them with it all. Although I really hate packing and moving and it can only be worse in the snow. So if the weather didn't clear up and I couldn't get home this weekend I probably wouldn't cry about it. I've heard the weather is supposed to clear up tomorrow morning, so if it does I can head out then.

If you've been following me on Twitter you can see that I have been confused and nervous and you may have even induced that it is due to some boy issues. I'm not going to talk about it, but I'll just say that I'm taking things as they come right now.

My stomach is growling so I am going to go and hope that the cafeteria has something edible for lunch. I went out to eat at The Grill and had a kick-ass burger and fries yesterday!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Confident. Happy. Inspired. These are three words that can explain how I'm feeling right now! My new classes are amazing. There are some boring points, but overall they are very upbeat and fun. Many of my teachers have lot of passion for the subjects they're teaching. I swear it makes all the difference in the world. When my teacher is passionate it inspires me and makes me want to be passionate. It makes me want to try harder and learn more. I've been to almost every single one of my classes at least once. There is only one class I have not had yet, and I have it tomorrow afternoon. I am really enjoying them all, though. It's very surprising. I feel foolish for being so nervous, but at the same time I know that being nervous is just a part of how I deal with change. I am not sure which class is my favorite so far. Maybe Spanish. The teacher is from Costa Rica (I think) and he's a lot of fun to learn from. He talks with his hands a lot and he encourages us all to do our best by giving us positive feedback and working personally on our weak points. I think it is easier for me than expected because I took 4 years of French, and the languages are very similar.

I have to say I never thought I would love being in class so much. My only concern is that I still feel knots in my stomach whenever I think about being in my lab class where I actually need to interact with customers. The knots dissolve as soon as I'm in class, but beforehand I work myself up thinking of all the possible things that I can do wrong. It's just frustrating, and something I need to work through.

I love how small my class is. There are only 6 of us! We are all going to know each other really well by the end of these 6 months. We're doing a lot of team building type activities, and it's wonderful. I feel so accepted. It's so different from high school where we all grew up together so they saw that stupid little kid I used to be. These people don't see that kid. Maybe that's why guys are actually starting to be interested in me? It's a strange feeling. Of course, not knowing much about the people I go to school with has got its drawbacks. I was eating dinner in the cafeteria talking with this guy and somehow we got on the topic of tattoos. I show him mine, and he starts in on the stereotypical crap. "Oh, it's evil. Do you cast spells? Blah, blah, blah." Not really in a mean way. But, still, I took it negatively. I should have expected it and dealt with it in a better way, but it still takes my by surprise when someone says something like that. I'm glad I don't have classes with this person, because I don't like him very much.

It's snowing here! Second real snowfall of the year. While I was walking to dinner I couldn't help but stare up at the sky. Falling snow is so beautiful. I just wish it wouldn't fall on my car...

I'll try to read blogs soon! I think Thursday and Friday will have to be my catchup days.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

So, now that I know what my real class schedule for December is, I have to say that I am excited about this month. I say October is my favorite month because of the weather, the colors, the food, and Halloween. But December just makes me happy. I'm not a big fan of the cold, but snow is very pretty when it first falls. And I'll never be able to forget how beautiful ice can be after last year. I haven't driven in ice or snow yet, so that may change my tune. xD I have a lot of reasons to love December, though. My birthday. My sister's birthday. (Which is Tomorrow! I can't believe she'll be 14.) Christmas music, movies, decorations and lights. Not to mention the fact that it is the one month of the year everybody is focused on giving. This message is spread everywhere and every way all month long. It's fantastic!

You know that feeling the day after a big holiday, like Thanksgiving? It's like a balloon deflating. There is such a build up, just waiting for the big day. The day after is such a disappointment, so you start looking forward to the next time you can feel that euphoria again. After Thanksgiving that time is Christmas. It's a few days of pure happiness, focused around family. And this year for school we have the whole week (from the 21st to the 25th) off! My parents are planning on moving into our new house before Christmas, so I know it's going to be a busy month. I can't wait to be in our new home, though. Christmas cheer should help get rid of that off feeling the house has.

I swear, only at NECI do they screw with schedules this much. Apparently they have us on a different schedule for December than for the rest of Mod 2. So for just this month (the whole 3 weeks we actully have classes!) this is my schedule.

Of course I didn't find this out until after I got to class this morning. Good thing I have Spanish at the same time and in the same place.

I am feeling a mixture of excitement, fear, exhaustion and hunger. Excitement and fear over my new classes, exhaustion and hunger because it's been a long day! Denis let us out of class early today, though, so luckily I get to go brave dinner at the cafeteria.

I have another post being planned in my head right now, I'll write it after dinner.

Monday, November 30, 2009

After being at our soon to be new home for 5 days straight it is finally Monday! Monday means Mom and Dad have work, Tia has school, but Tori still has two days free. Hooray! My plans for today are as follows:

1. Blogging2. Finish making X-Mas cards3. Sew pillow cases for myself and Tia4. Clean the house up5. Prep for dinner6. Go to Walmart for the millionth time this week because my dad needs cough syrup7. Finish re-reading Twilight*8. Watch Phantom of the Opera and Aladdin with Tia

Is it sad that this is a fun day for me? That this is how I am choosing to spend my day? I don't care. I take joy in the small things in life. Like last night; watching cartoons with Tia until we were both tired and then still sitting up together laughing and ogling Johnny Depp in the new People. Yes, I bought it just for the pictures of Johnny Depp. It is well worth the five bucks I spent on it. But, anyway, that was a good night. It is what I miss most while I'm at school.

One thing I will not miss while at school is working on the new house. I'm sick of painting walls. I'm sick of cleaning up after the gross people who lived there before. I'm so glad this is the last time we're moving! My parents have always rented, and we've moved around town a lot. Like every 2-3 years. Now that they're buying a house it's the end of it. My room is still not completely painted, so you'll have to wait a while longer for pictures. I picked bright colors! My room is orange and blue. I needed to contrast the dull boring colors my parents picked for the rest of the house. Tia's room is my favorite, though. We splatter painted her room! It looks awesome.

I am going to turn on CMT and work on the Christmas cards. Oh, they've been playing Christmas music on my favorite radio station all weekend, and now it's on CMT too! That actually makes me happy. I love X-Mas music. One of my favorites that they played on the radio this weekend was 'Leroy the Redneck Reindeer'. It just makes me laugh every time I hear it!

* Number 8 is my favorite and what I'm looking forward to the most. I've been wanting to watch POTO for a while now. And watching it with Tia is even better. It took me more than a year to get her to watch it for the first time! And we have both had the Arabian Nights song stuck in our heads since last night so we want to watch Aladdin. I love watching movies with Tia. <3

Friday, November 27, 2009

Wow I've been busy! Shopping, cooking, crying because I messed up while cooking, crying because I accidentally turned my white clothes pink (Anyone know how to fix that?!), being angry at my parents because they cleaned and painted over at the new house on Thanksgiving. I went to Walmart with my mom and aunt at 5 this morning. CRAZY! Then we went back again later to buy paint for the house, not so crazy. It's like after 8AM it turned into a regular shopping day there. I need to go back to Walmart for a 3rd time in a little while so I can buy even more paint for my room. I can't wait until it's all painted so I can show you the pictures! Speaking of the house, when I was there last night I noticed that it has got this really weird vibe to it. It definitely needs a cleansing to get rid of the energy from the previous tenants. I know there are a lot of different ways to do that, so I am looking for suggestions on what your favorite method is.

As promised, I have pictures. This is just the desserts. We had the same old dinner that most people have. Turkey, stuffing, etc.

Chocolate Pecan Pie. YUM! I took this pic before I cut into it. It tastes like a fudgy brownie filled with pecans. I made the crust myself, and it looked nice, but it got destoryed during transport from my house to my grandparent's house.

Homemade whipped cream. :)

Some of my cousin's carrot cake that I took home.

This is the cheesecake I messed up on. It still tastes delicious.

Oreo Torte. Probably the most delicious thing I've ever eaten. This is the one I left at home for us.

This is the one I brought for my family to eat.

The cats just got to lay around all day. They looked so cute I just had to get some pictures.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Hello from New Hampshire! I skipped out on the knowledge bowl, awards ceremony and whatever other fun stuff they had planned for us today up at NECI. I'm home now and I have a busy schedule. My parents gave me money and I need to go grocery shopping today to get food for Thanksgiving. Tomorrow I am going to be doing some pre-Thanksgiving cooking. (The rolls and desserts.) Then Thursday is actually Thanksgiving and I'll be helping my mom cook while watching movies and playing games with my sister and my friend who's coming over. I like the running around. I love the fact that I'm going to be with the people I care about. There's just something about this time of the year that makes me want to be home, cooking, eating, and hanging out.

My computer does not connect to the internet when I'm at home. My only comment about that is "WTH?!" I don't get it... Whatever, I am using my mom's laptop. I don't think I'll be on much at all with everything I'm going to be doing anyway. So I'm just going to say early Happy Thanksgiving! Plan on my next post being the day after Thanksgiving with pictures of what we end up eating. Plan on that being later in the day because I finally get to go shopping with my mom on Black Friday! I've been begging her to let me go with her for years.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

I'm in a random mood. I've been suck in Montpelier all weekend and I've watched every good movie and TV show Hulu has to offer. I ironed my brigade for that Assessment Week thing tomorrow. (Which I still don't see the point behind.) My room is as clean as I feel like making it. I'm not in the mood to read. So I'm sitting here listening to music and stumbling. Don't know what stumbling is? It's the most addicting thing I think I have ever started doing. Go here and click on the subjects you're interested in. Click the stumble button and it will bring you to a website related to one of the interests you clicked on. You'll go to a different website every time you click on the stumble button. Try it out. You'll be addicted soon. If you follow me on Twitter you can see some of my favorite finds while stumbling.

Another awesome thing I've heard about recently is failblog. Absolutely hilarious! If you want a laugh, go there.

Last random thing I want to share with you is this song. 3 Wooden Crosses has been a favorite song of mine for a while. It never fails to make me think and feel that there is a higher purpose for why things happen. Have you ever gotten that tingly feeling when you hear something (anything, not just songs) and you know it's teaching you something and helping you grow as a person? This song gives me that feeling.

I don't know if I am in group A or B for the Restaurant and Guest Management class, but I've emailed the teacher requesting the Thursday group so I can drive home on Fridays. I had Denis as a teacher in my first mod, and he's pretty cool, so I think he'll let me be in that group.

Last night I was feeling really scared and worried. My excitement is slowly coming back. I guess I'll see how I feel once these new classes start! I am really looking forward to my Thanksgiving break. It will be so healing to just be cooking for my friends and family again.

Friday, November 20, 2009

So here's how it went! I think I rocked the ServSafe Exam. It was waaay easier than I expected. What scared me the most was what pathogens caused which diseases and there weren't many questions about that. My math exam was also easy. The movie for my computer class came out... okay. It's really not that great, but whatever. The interview? No, just no. It's not that it went badly. I passed. I was nervous, but that wasn't the issue either. You know how you're scared for something so you prep like mad? I did that. Have you ever forgotten everything you wanted to say as soon as you were asked even after all that prepping? I did that too. I answered the questions directly, but didn't elaborate or say anything I had planned to say. And he threw me some curve balls that I hadn't planned for or ever even thought about. Don't ask me what they were because I can't remember. All I know is that after the interview I felt completely crushed. Like every professional choice I've made up to this point has been wrong. I don't really get why. I'm just so scared. What if I did choose wrong? What if I'm not cut out to be a manager? I want to be back in high school where things were easy and a lot less scary. I just went to class because I had to. But I liked it. I've always been so good in a classroom setting. Hands-on has never been my thing. What a stupid choice for me to make, going to a hands-on school. I'm not cut out to live in the real world and do real things. I wish there were someone here to talk to about it. Ranting like this helps but it doesn't make me feel better. I want someone who knows me to look at me and tell me how stupid I'm being, how can I think that. And I want to believe them. Even if my cousin were here to tell me that I wouldn't believe her. I'm not a leader. Why am I trying to be one? I'm too sensitive. Too insecure. Too shy. My brain doesn't work that way. Even my teachers knew it. I remember when my English teacher told me how surprised he was when I chose to go to NECI. He said I'd be a good scholar. I know I would be, I told him, but this is stable. I could study for the rest of my life and be the happiest person in the world, but you just can't live that way. Yes, I love food. I love feeding people. The interviewer said he saw passion when I mentioned my plans for a restaurant that feeds families. Yes, I want to do that. At least I think I do. I'm questioning everything now, and it's scaring the crap out of me. I don't like it.

Why couldn't I be normal? Why couldn't I go to a regular university, party, go to class, and not care what my plans were for the rest of my life? Or why couldn't I have been blessed with some amazing talent that's wicked profitable? Why can't this be easy?

I'll look at this later and wonder what the hell is wrong with me. These are my emotions at their rawest. The totally uncensored, insecure, Me. I don't think I like me. I'm kind of pathetic. Does everyone feel this way? Do they all hide it? HOW?

I wasn't sure if I wanted to publish this post. Debating back and forth. It makes me look stupid. I shouldn't care, it's my blog. You like having readers, though, don't you? Yes. And you had 8 comments on that last post. Oh well. They don't have to read and comment on this if they don't want to.

So, fuck it. It's published. Hello, cyber world! This is me! I'm really sorry if you actually read all this. I am in a weird mood. And I ate a lot of melted Ben & Jerry's Cheesecake Brownie Ice Cream. Hi new people who commented on my last post! Sorry for the mess. My brain likes to explode sometimes.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I figured I'd keep you all in the loop about what's going on with me at school! Today was my last day of my baking class. We had a written exam at 6:30 this morning. Fun, right?! No, not really. I may be a morning person, but I'm still human. No one wants to take a test that soon after they wake up. I'm sure I did fine on it, though.

Tomorrow I have to take my ServSafe Exam. Now there is a test I'm scared of failing! Mostly because if you fail you have to pay the $36 again so you can retake it. When I pass it I will be ServSafe Certified, though! So I won't have any excuse for why I can't remember what bacteria causes which disease, damn. I am worried about failing it, but I'm sure I'll do fine since it's multiple choice. I have a 25% chance of guessing the correct answer if I have to guess.

On Friday I have a mock job interview for my Professional Development class which is scaring the crap out of me. I can BS my way through written exams if need be, but when it comes to talking and doing I am not so great... And there really isn't a way to 'study' for it. I've never had a job interview, but I know the unprepared feeling is the worst part about it. I'm just sitting here wondering and worrying "Which questions will they ask me? What if I get tongue tied and forget everything?" AHH!

I guess technically this is like my finals week. I also have a final project for my computer class and an exam in my math class on Friday. Then on Monday we have an 'Assessment Day'. I really don't understand it. From what I hear two people from each block go to each class for three hours and there is some kind of competition between the teams. It sounds like a waste of time to me, because I hear we aren't actually getting graded on it! I'd like to just start my Thanksgiving Vacation early, why can't they make it optional? This school is so horrible at telling us what it going on!

Monday, November 16, 2009

I am going to be cleaning my dorm room up this afternoon. Mostly because it's horribly dirty and needs to be cleaned, but also sort of in preparation for the Night of Hecate which I am deciding to participate in last minute. Using a flashlight. Yeah, we aren't allowed candles in dorms. We have uber-sensitive smoke detectors and I can guarantee that if I set it off they would fine me.

Part of my cleaning this afternoon will be looking for bedbugs. The dorm building next door had them, now someone on the floor above me has them. I'm really creeped out and if I find them in my room I am probably going to scream. I can tell you I won't be sleeping in my bed, either! Someone I know back home is an exterminator and he lent me a 16X magnifying glass to look for them, and even gave me a picture of the little nasty things. Which grossed me out even more. When "Don't let the bedbugs bite!" becomes a real warning I start to worry. I didn't think bedbugs were real when I was a kid. I thought they were something my grandma made up to joke with us. Like her pink skippawampus that lived in the woods behind the house.

Oh, and did I ever mention how much I absolutely LOVE lists? To-do lists save my butt. I would forget so many things lately if I didn't write them down on my brightly colored sticky notes.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

When I cam home last night I had two awesome surprises waiting for me! The first was a box of goodies from Jaz at Octoberfarm!

It came all wrapped up! It made me feel like I was opening a birthday or Christmas present.

There was even a card and chocolates!

Ta-da!

She even included an extra jar of her homemade pepper jelly- which I can't wait to try! I'm going to have it out for Thanksgiving.

A honey bear. :)

The jar of preserves.

More candy! Which was tempted to eat for breakfast...

Instead I had some of the yummy jam on an english muffin.

After a few bites I decided to try it with peanut butter... it made the best PB&J I've ever had!

The ingredient list for the jam.

I ate my breakfast while reading my new book that I won from Mrs. B's 31 Days of Halloween! Once I get good at crocheting (I'm seriously stuck right now! I need to see if my aunt Taunya can help me...) I am going to start making some of these wicked cute things. My goal: to be able to make these by this time next year. Then I can make a bunch and have a giveaway with them!

I have won so many great things this year. I want to have a giveaway of my own! I am brainstorming now to try and come up with something I can giveaway. Hmm, I wonder how well fudge would travel? I don't really know what else I'd be able to make and mail to someone. I can't really make anything cool that isn't food. xD

I am so thankful for my amazing blog buddies. Thank you Joyce! Thank you Mrs. B! And thank you to everyone who reads my blog!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Christmas will come early for a five year old Michigan boy this year. Noah Biorkman is battling cancer and is not expected to live much longer. Noah's family is celebrating Christmas now and Noah loves Christmas cards. Noah's mom is asking for Christmas cards for her son.

Please take the time to send a card or letter to:

Noah Biorkman 1141 Fountain View Circle South Lyon, MI 48178

OR

you can make Noah a Christmas card online at Studio Day Spring and that they'll cover shipping costs and send all the cards to him if you use the code: NOAH

The link is http://www.studiodayspring.com

Note: There are two addresses floating around on the internet. The other one is:

Noah Biorkmanc/o Scott Biorkman3480 Petoskey WayMilford, MI 48380

I think the card would get to Noah either way, one of them is just newer than the other.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Apparently, when you talk the Universe listens. I felt like a zombie for a couple days. The hours passed slowly in class and I felt overwhelmed by homework. As usual, though, as soon as it gets to the point where I want to complain about it everything gets better. Today we got out of class an hour early. Yay! And because I got so much of my homework out of the way on Monday and Tuesday I only have two things to do tonight. Only lecture classes tomorrow and Friday, so I don't need to get up for class at 6:30 AM, which means I can go to bed later than 8PM. I guess you only need to put up with the bad stuff for so long before things get better.

I have been forgetting to say what I am thankful for! I have a lot of days to make up for, so how about I make a list?

HomeFamilyNice classmatesPeople who careThe good days

I've had this song stuck in my head for the past few days.

Toes by The Zac Brown Band

Oh and for those who want to know about my Baking class, it is probably the best class I've taken so far. We're in a kitchen getting a lot done, but it is not nearly as stressful as cooking theory was. I definitely prefer baking to regular cooking! If I had to choose between the two baking would win hands down. The homework for class is boring. We have to read certain chapters out of our text book and do a few math problems. The math is similar to what we need to do in class to change recipes, so it's actually useful. It's kind of cool to be putting math to good use.

So far I have been on 3 stations: quick breads, baker, and mixing. On the quick bread station we made coffee cake and scones, when I was baker I baked trays and trays of cookies, and today on mixing station we made 4 different kinds of bread dough. Did I forget to mention that we got a book when we came to NECI full of these amazing recipes? I have the recipes for everything they serve in the bakery and more. YUM!

Unfortunately I have the world's worst partner for this class. I do not like this guy. He is a jerk who thinks he knows everything about everything. He treats me like I'm stupid. He brown noses the teachers. Gah! I'm sorry, I just really don't like him. No one in our block does. I can't wait for this class to be over simply because I can't stand working with him.

I don't want to end this post on a bad note, so I am going to find something happy to write about! How about the fact that Thanksgiving is only a week away? Yeah! I am looking forward to Stuff Yourself With Turkey Day. I even have most of that week off from school.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

I am alive, just busy. Busy, busy, busy. When I went home on Friday I was told about what a horrible week it had been there. My Aunt Jen and Uncle Jay are getting a divorce, which I found out about 4 weeks ago. But about a week ago my uncle started getting a little nuts about everything. Accusing my aunt of stuff, blowing up and throwing things, and refusing to go to mediation, opting to get a lawyer instead. He's making it a nasty divorce, which my cousins definitely DO NOT need. They stayed at our grandparent's home all weekend because of it. In times like this my family really pulls together. I was with them all weekend, doing what I could to help.

Then yesterday (ugh this week is going by slowly!) my new class started. I'm in baking now! This is a fun class, but it has homework unlike the class I just finished. Plus I have all the homework for my other classes that I need to do. I have to write a resume/ cover letter, make an e-portfolio, and read my entire ServSafe coursebook. I've got it all down to a schedule, but it's still time consuming (I did homework for 3 hours straight last night, no break) and mentally exhausting. SO, by the end of the day I'm ready to just fall asleep. Which is good because I have class at 6:30 AM.

I just wanted to post to let you all know why I haven't been around, and why I may not be around much for the next 2 weeks. I have a lot to do both here at school and at home. My parents are buying a house. Finally! It needs a lot of work done to it, though, so I'll be doing painting, cleaning, etc. I hope everything is going well with everyone else. I'll try to read and comment on your blogs a bit.

Do I even need a reason to love Crunch bars? They're delicious. I've got a cough now, so I'm carrying my big bag of cough drops with me. The radio because I was getting bored of the songs on my iPod. Yarn, well I can't crochet without it! I am kind of stuck on that now, too. I can make a chain, but I'm still trying to figure out how to make rows. xD I don't know why, but I really like this ring I'm wearing. My grandma gave it to me shortly before I left for college because it didn't fit her anymore. She got it from Sea World years ago.

On another note: Check out Suzie's Etsy Shop! She's created some beautiful pendants and necklaces and has added them there to keep her tarot card reading company.

Edit: I forgot to write what I was thankful for! I am definitely thankful for the internet. <3

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

So this post is going to be a bunch of random babbling- just figured I'd warn you now.

I am back at school now and, yes, I have internet again! It never really went away, my laptop just didn't want to connect to the wireless at home the last two days for some reason. Everyone else's computer was connecting just fine, but mind wouldn't. I was concerned, so I took it to my grandpa the computer genius. Of course there's nothing wrong with it and it connects just fine to the wireless there. My computer hates me.

I have decided to participate in the 27 Days of Thankful that Amanda at Serenity Now is putting on. Each day you say something you're thankful for. Since I don't post on my blog every single day I am planning on tweeting what I'm thankful for. Keep an eye out! Today I am thankful for medicine. My Dad and Tia have both caught a flu/cold of some sort. I have a slight cough on top of monthly crampy, achy, issues and a cold sore. I must say, having the ability to just buy something that makes me feel better is wicked awesome.

I won Creepy Cute Crochet from Irreference on the last day of Mrs. B's 31 Days of Halloween. Yay! I haven't crocheted since I was 12 so I am re-teaching myself. Once I get good at it I'm going to have a ton of fun with the book. Thank you Irreference! Thank you Mrs. B! I'll be sharing my crochet adventures here on my blog.

Suzie has decided to sell a tarot reading in her Etsy shop (which will be posted to my list of wicked awesome things you should check out ASAP). If you're brave enough to face what the cards truthfully have to tell you then go there!

I'm pretty sure there was more I wanted to say. Oh, right! I went to Borders over the weekend and bought myself a book to kick start my resolution of learning about herbs. I now own Herbal Remedies by Andrew Chevallier. It has a lot of good info and some amazing pictures! I'm only part way into it and I've already learned some cool things.

I have class soon. But it's just a lecture for me today, I've got lab tomorrow. I'm not sure if this is good or bad only because I don't know if I'll be feeling better or worse tomorrow. Fingers crossed that it's better!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Cupcakes! Store bought mix, but a homemade frosting. We added a raspberry extract to it, a lot of red food coloring, and mini chocolate chips. Yum!

Dirt Dessert, with worms! It's just oreos and coolwhip with gummy worms, but it everyone's favorite in my family.Well, the dirt might just be second to chocolate covered pretzels! It wouldn't feel like Halloween in my family without them. I covered them in sprinkles and coconut. It was my first time covering them in coconut, and I definitely like it!

Some red ice cubes for our drinks. ;)

While I was making these, with help from my cousin of course, I sent the younger (okay 13 & 14 year old) kids to decorate. They did a great job!

And Tia carved our last pumpkin. I love it!

We had a fun night of sitting around eating junk food and watching movies. I hope everyone else had a fun night, too!

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. "'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door - Only this, and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December, And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly I wished the morrow; - vainly I had sought to borrow From my books surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the lost Lenore - For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore - Nameless here for evermore.

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating, "'Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door - Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door; - This it is, and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, "Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, That I scarce was sure I heard you"- here I opened wide the door; - Darkness there, and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before; But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token, And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Lenore?" This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Lenore!" - Merely this, and nothing more.

Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning, Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before. "Surely," said I, "surely that is something at my window lattice: Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore - Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore; - 'Tis the wind and nothing more."

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a stately raven of the saintly days of yore; Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he; But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door - Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door - Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling, By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore. "Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven, Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the Nightly shore - Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly, Though its answer little meaning- little relevancy bore; For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being Ever yet was blest with seeing bird above his chamber door - Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door, With such name as "Nevermore."

But the raven, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour. Nothing further then he uttered- not a feather then he fluttered - Till I scarcely more than muttered, "other friends have flown before - On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before." Then the bird said, "Nevermore."

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, "Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store, Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore - Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore Of 'Never - nevermore'."

But the Raven still beguiling all my fancy into smiling, Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird, and bust and door; Then upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore - What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous bird of yore Meant in croaking "Nevermore."

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core; This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamplight gloated o'er, But whose velvet violet lining with the lamplight gloating o'er, She shall press, ah, nevermore!

Then methought the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer Swung by Seraphim whose footfalls tinkled on the tufted floor. "Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee - by these angels he hath sent thee Respite - respite and nepenthe, from thy memories of Lenore:Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil! - prophet still, if bird or devil! - Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore, Desolate yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted - On this home by horror haunted- tell me truly, I implore - Is there - is there balm in Gilead? - tell me - tell me, I implore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil - prophet still, if bird or devil! By that Heaven that bends above us - by that God we both adore - Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn, It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore - Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore." Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

"Be that word our sign in parting, bird or fiend," I shrieked, upstarting - "Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken!- quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door; And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming, And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor; And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor Shall be lifted - nevermore!

I figured I would share some more spooky poetry. Poe is perfect for the season, isn't he? Speaking of sharing- Mrs. B. is still sharing a lot of wonderful goodies with us! Her 31 Days of Halloween ends, well, on Halloween! Go check it out if you haven't yet. I've got my eye on the subscription to Witches & Pagans magazine! I always need something else to read. xD

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Samhain is the Pagan New Year, so I figured why not make some resolutions? There are some things I want to work on in the coming year:

Learn as much as possible about herbalismUse my tarot deckConnect with my spirit guideStart writing things down- possibly in a BOSLook more into my ancestry

I think learning about herbs is going to be my #1 thing for the coming year. It is something that seems interesting to me, and I figure if I dedicate myself to it for a year it will motivate me to actively learn. Everything else on the list is important, but not my main focus.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

So my whole restaurant idea began about 2 1/2 -3 years ago (about 10th grade). We watch a lot of Food Network in my house, and my favorite show on it is Guy Fieri’s ‘Diners Drive-ins and Dives’. After watching this show often enough I obviously started to form my own ideas of what a perfect restaurant would be like. These plans floated through my brain for weeks before I finally decided that it was my goal to open up a great little restaurant. This changed a lot for me. Before this I was planning on becoming a journalist, since that seemed to be the only reliable career I could have where I would be able to write. I will never regret this decision; I don’t think I would have been happy as a journalist.

I began taking more of the business and cooking classes in high school. In my tiny little school there wasn’t much, but it was better than if I hadn’t taken them at all. I made a really great connection with both my business and my home-ec teacher. I told them about my plans and they were both wicked supportive. I may not have been lucky enough to go to a tech school like some of my classmates here at NECI, but I don’t care. Growing up in a small town has helped shape who I am and what my plans for my restaurant are.

I know that I want a small restaurant. Bigger than a diner, though. I know that I want it to be family-friendly. I have a lot of cousins and growing up the whole family could rarely eat out together simply because the restaurants could not accommodate so many people. The food needs to have that home-cooked meal feeling to it. Just because you eat out doesn’t mean you don’t deserve comfort food!

Right now the plan is that my cousin will be the cook, since she is also attending NECI. That may change, though, since she is a baking and pastry student. I can always have some awesome baked goods at least! I have this little part of me that is just dying to have a Bed & Breakfast. So if that is in any way possible I definitely plan to have it as well. With or without the B&B, though, my restaurant will serve breakfast. All three meals are important and I just don’t understand why more restaurants don’t serve it.

Then my cousin’s boyfriend, who is so loved by everyone he is practically a part of the family, is like this alcohol EXPERT. He also wants to start a micro-brewery. Hello bartender! It just makes sense, right?

So, if you can’t tell, it’s all pretty much going to be family run. Family is important to me, always has been, always will be. The only problem I can think of is the location. Location is the most difficult part of any restaurant plan. I want it as close to home as possible. That is going to take a lot of research, hopefully I learn more about finding a good location in one of my classes.

So, those are my big plans. I also want it to be a farm-to-table restaurant. Support your local farmers! Oh, and raw milk. I can't stand store bought milk, so I definitely need to offer raw milk. Haha, I love afterthoughts.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

I figured I would share a few things about myself for anyone who hasn’t been here before and may have decided to stop by after reading my guest post at Mrs. B’s.

When I first started this blog it was meant to be a way for me to meet and talk to other Pagans. If you read my posts you can tell that it has transformed from that to me talking about my whole life. So, about me- I am 18, I’m Pagan, I love literature, and I’m currently a freshman at the New England Culinary Institute where I am majoring in Hospitality and Restaurant Management. While here I am developing a plan for the restaurant I want to own and manage. I just realized that I haven’t actually clued any of my blog buddies in on what my restaurant plans are, so that’s a post you can all look forward to at some point soon!

My blog is really just a place for me to record where my path is taking me. I talk about what I’m learning in life, what I do (not much), and a whole bunch of random stuff that no one probably cares about. I hope if you’ve never been here before you decide to keep reading, I love finding new blogs to read.

Random Fact: Keene, NH- the biggest "city" near my hometown- had the world record for most jack-o'-lanterns carved and lit in one place, until Boston beat us in 2006.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Just for anyone who didn't know- I'm a poetry nut. I love literature, and I'm sad that it isn't a major part of my life. But when picking a future career I decided that restaurant management was a lot more practical than anything literature related. Everyone needs to eat, less and less people care about reading.

That being said I am totally in a poetry mood and just went to blackle (just like google, but it doesn't hurt your eyes!) and typed in poetry, hoping I could find a few good poems to read to satisfy my yearning for the written word.

Luckily a decent site actually came up in my search! I will be saving http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/ in my bookmark. All my poetry books are at home, and even though I have my kindle (best invention EVER!) I don't want to have to buy the books again. I can always read Shakespeare on my kindle, it was on of the first things I bought since my copy at home is the complete works that is so heavy and impractical to read from, but I prefer reading Shakespeare out loud and my roommate/ cousin is asleep.

Now to share a couple of the poems with you.

anyone lived in a pretty how town by E. E. Cummings

anyone lived in a pretty how town(with up so floating many bells down)spring summer autumn winterhe sang his didn't he danced his did

Women and men(both little and small)cared for anyone not at allthey sowed their isn't they reaped their samesun moon stars rain

children guessed(but only a fewand down they forgot as up they grewautumn winter spring summer)that noone loved him more by more

when by now and tree by leafshe laughed his joy she cried his griefbird by snow and stir by stillanyone's any was all to her

someones married their everyoneslaughed their cryings and did their dance(sleep wake hope and then)theysaid their nevers they slept their dream

stars rain sun moon(and only the snow can begin to explainhow children are apt to forget to rememberwith up so floating many bells down)

one day anyone died i guess(and noone stooped to kiss his face)busy folk buried them side by sidelittle by little and was by was

all by all and deep by deepand more by more they dream their sleepnoone and anyone earth by aprilwish by spirit and if by yes.

Women and men(both dong and ding)summer autumn winter springreaped their sowing and went their camesun moon stars rain

A Dream Within A Dream by Edgar Allan Poe

Take this kiss upon the brow!And, in parting from you now,Thus much let me avow--You are not wrong, who deemThat my days have been a dream;Yet if hope has flown awayIn a night, or in a day,In a vision, or in none,Is it therefore the less gone?All that we see or seemIs but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roarOf a surf-tormented shore,And I hold within my handGrains of the golden sand--How few! yet how they creepThrough my fingers to the deep,While I weep--while I weep!O God! can I not graspThem with a tighter clasp?O God! can I not saveOne from the pitiless wave?Is all that we see or seemBut a dream within a dream?

Yes, the more abstract poems appealed to me this morning in my half awakeness. Hope you enjoyed them!

Saturday, October 17, 2009

1) Present this award to 7 others whose blogs I find brilliant in content and/or design, or those who have encouraged me.2) Tell those 7 people they've been awarded HONEST SCRAP and inform them of these guidelines in receiving the award.3) Share "10 Honest Things" about myself.

Here goes-

1. I am unbelievably selfish with my time. Not in the volunteering my time sense, I love doing meaningful volunteer work, but in the spending time with other people sense. This is one of the reasons I am having such a hard time making new friends! I love my 'me' time, and my me time doesn't include other people usually.

2. I tend to look for a deeper meaning in things.

3. I'm not very creative. I wish I were!

4. It takes me a long time to pick up a new skill or to change an old habit. No matter how often I tell myself that change is good I seem to fight it tooth and nail.

5. I feel like I'm using my religion as a crutch lately. Whenever I start feeling stressed or scared it comforts me.

6. Sometimes I wish I could just be like other teens and care about dating, movies, music, socializing, parties and trends. I just don't care about these things. It's so awkward to sit in a room and have everyone around me talking about things, like a band or movie, I know nothing about.

7. I love my body.

8. I have got an odd sense of humor that only certain friends seem to get. These same friends always know how to make me laugh!

9. Little things make me happy. Like walking across the lawn and stepping on all the wicked crunchy leaves! Why walk on the leafless paved path?

10. I'm usually very neat. It's a learned habit from living with my dad for 18+ years. He is an absolute neat freak! If the house wasn't clean to his standards then there was always yelling. Since moving into my dorm I have learned to ignore the mess. There is no possible way to keep a room this small clean!

Haha I just read through these, they really make me sound lame. They're all true, though. I guess when it comes to putting 10 honest things out there hardly anyone is going to look cool.

Now to pick people! I want to share this award with the new people I've met this month while participating in Mrs. B's 31 Days of Halloween along with a few people I've known for a while.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

I wanted to share that I did really well on my Practical! The written exam was easy, at least for someone like me who studies obsessively before tests. The cooking part of the exam was a bit more challenging. There were 7 things we had to cook, and we had to have at least 5 of them done in two hours or we had to take the whole thing over. Luckily I got 5 out of 7 done, so I only need to complete those 2 things on Saturday. I was pleasantly surprised with myself for doing so well.

I really don't have much to talk about. I thought I did yesterday, but then I started feeling kind of crappy. I'm feeling better today, but not 100%. I've been listening to PCP all day, and I watched episode 3 of House. Yeah, this is how I spend my day off!

I probably would have done more if I had been feeling 100% better. I know that since I started listening to PCP I have realized that, even though I've been studying this path since about 9th grade, I don't know very much. I know how ignorant I am, and I don't like it. I feel like I am past the "Pagan 101" type things, but I don't know what my next move is. Does anyone have any advice?

Sunday, October 11, 2009

I was watching a fellow Pagan teen's youtube videos and she mentioned Pagan Centered Podcast multiple times, insisting that anyone watching go there and listen. I took her suggestion and listened to their latest podcast, which just happened to be a live one, and I loved it! PCP is hilarious and informative. I plan to listen to the other 120 they have up. Check them out!

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Do, De, Do. I am totally NOT procrastinating on finishing my project for a class right now... Okay I am. But I just remembered that I with all my excitement about the package from Mrs. B. I had forgotten to share this with you all!

I bought my first tarot deck. =) When I first showed interest in tarot a few years ago I tried out a deck my dad had sitting around(a Rider-Waite one) and it just didn't feel right. The imagery and the energy both. So I've been searching around for some time. I finally found the right one for me! I haven't gotten a chance to work with it yet, but I will! It's a good thing I'm sharing a dorm with my cousin and not someone who might possibly have a problem with this kind of stuff.

Today's guest blog at Mrs. B's was about the history of tarot cards! Go check it out.

And I added a new button over there ---> for the Pagan Blogger's Network. It's a wonderful idea, trying to connect Pagan bloggers. If you are a Pagan blogger then check it out! Reading through the list I know a few of the people already, and I'm looking forward to checking out the blogs of people who I don't know.

I don't want to make this post about college, I have enough of those, but I just want to say that I really am adjusted now. And I'm liking it. "Let's get back to our sheep!" as my high school French teacher would say. I need to finish up this project.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

I just figured I would try and post something at least once this week, lol! I don't have much to say right now other than I am wicked busy with two school projects (one due Thursday one due Friday) and a practical exam coming up (next week!) that I need to study for. The practical is what is really scaring me. It is putting our cooking skills to the test. I am actually worried, something that never happened in high school! There is also a traditional test portion, which is the part I'm studying for. I'm making flash cards like crazy!

It's time for breakfast and my stomach is growling. Time to go! I hope I can find some time this weekend to get on and write another post.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

When I got home last night I was thrilled to find my package from Mrs. B. waiting for me! I was the winner of her 400 followers giveaway. She went all out! Thank you so much Mrs. B., I am going to have the coolest dorm room in the whole school!

Friday, October 2, 2009

Yup, it's Friday! That means that tonight after our final classes my cousin and I will be packing my car and taking that long drive back home. Okay- it's only 1 1/2 hours if she drives, closer to 2 hours if I drive. It just feels like forever! As much as I am looking forward to my weekend and going home, I had a very good week here in Montpelier. Classes have been going well. I'm handling the stress easily now. I am sleeping better. Overall I think I am almost adjusted to college life! How exciting is that? Now I just need to make some friends and I might actually have something to do on weekends that would tempt me to stay up here.

At home last weekend I was supposed to do tons of baking and such, but the fact is I never got around to it. I was kept busy the whole time with other things. This weekend I might have some time! Last weekend I went to an Alan Jackson concert (I forgot to mention that, didn't I?) and it ate up a whole afternoon. This weekend I will have a few school projects to work on, but I am going to make time for fun! Like eating at a couple awesome restaurants (one of which I am considering as my internship site!) and getting outside in the cool Autumn air. Who knows, I might even get the chance to play with a certain little 2-year-old who I haven't seen in two months! Oh crap... he's 3 now! I missed his birthday.... So it looks like I need to do some shopping as well! What do you give a little kid who has everything?

I will be checking in with the blog-world, even if it's just briefly to see what wonderful things Mrs. B. is giving away! Yes, she works weekends. It is the 31 Days of Halloween! So make all her work worth-while and go see her! Say "Hi!" And don't forget to thank her, because she really has put in a ton of work to make this amazing event happen.

I may not be leaving until 5 o' clock, but how about some driving music?

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Today is the first day of October, and you know what that means.... Mrs. B's 31 Days of Halloween starts today! If you've never been over to her blog, do so now! This is the most exciting blog event in all of October!

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Last week my parents went to The Big E (a fair)and while there they bought my sister and I these cool necklaces with a picture of the moon we were born under. My sister was born just before the full moon, while I was born just before the new moon. Together we complete eachother! When my parents saw this they decided that they had to buy the necklaces.

The moon I was born under is called a Balsamic moon. What moon were you born under? You can enter your birth date here and find out. When you do find out, this website has some great info about the different phases people are born under.

Here is what it says for the Balsamic Moon:

The Balsamic Phase is the last phase of the Moon's cycle. This is the time of adjustment from one cycle to another. It is the bridge between the past and the future. People born at this time are finishing an eight phase cycle of lifetimes. Therefore, this lifetime is a very karmic one. There is a pattern of very intense, all-consuming although short term relationships with people from the past including other lifetimes. These karmic ties are in need of resolution before continuing on into the next new cycle. These people often have pronounced psychic abilities. They are the visionaries seeing years ahead of their times. As children they often feel apart from their peers; they are loners. Balsamic Moon people are able to take the true meaning of a situation, distill it into its wisdom essence and plant it into the awareness of others. They are the gurus. Their job is the transmission of essential knowledge which will germinate at the next level during the next Lunation Cycle.

BALSAMIC NATAL PHASE, 315 deg - 360 deg.

If you were born during the Lunar Cycle of the Balsamic Phase...

This is a very karmic lifetime in which you are meeting all those with which you have unfinished business from the previous seven lifetimes before this one. Therefore, you may encounter many brief, but intense relationships. There is a need for completion, a sense of closure to occur concerning these individuals. This can be confusing at times. It may be helpful to ask the question either to the person or to yourself, "Is there anything I've ever needed to say, do or give to you, let me do it now. If there is anything you've needed to say, do or give to me let's not put it off any longer, let us complete it now." If you cannot finish something in person, you need to ask in meditation to be released, possibly to forgive or to be forgiven. Having a full past of prior lifetimes to reflect upon, you are a born visionary, a natural psychic with a bridge to the future.

You realized at an early age that you were different and may have pretended to be like everyone else to fend off alienation from peers. You may have been described as an unusual child, and may have even been regarded as the black sheep of the family. Others will recognize your special-ness. One of your unique qualities is to be able to take the key meaning of all situations and distill it into its wisdom essence. You can then transfer this awareness and consciousness in others to live beyond this physical life. Your commitment is to the future. By reckoning with the past, you can consciously make a break with it. You sense that something larger than yourself can manifest through you if you make the commitment to allow it to do so. For one to understand you at all one needs to look at what is happening THROUGH you. The transmission of essential knowledge is your purpose.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

1.) Thank the person who gave this to you.2.) Copy the logo and place it in your blog.3.) Link the person who nominated you.4.) Name 7 things about yourself that no one would really know.5.) Nominate seven ‘Kreativ Bloggers.’6.) Post links to the seven blogs you nominate.7.) Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know you nominated them.

The 7 things are the most difficult part of this! Okay, here goes...

1- I have arachnophobia. Yup. I am terrified of spiders! The big ones are freaky, but the little ones are even worse because they could be hiding anywhere.

2- I am a really picky eater. This is partially because of what I grew up eating. (My parents are not the healthiest eaters.) I am trying new foods while I'm here at school, but I still don't enjoy much variety.

3- Part of the reason I am such a picky eater is because I have a problem with certain food textures! I can't eat berries, even though I love their taste. I can't eat mashed potatoes. I can't eat any mushy vegetable really.

4- I snort laugh. My friends and family love to make me laugh just so they can pick on me after! This can be a problem if friends decide to make me laugh while we're eating in the cafeteria.... (There is a really embarrassing story behind that!)

5- I can't pronounce anything in Spanish. In 8th grade we had to try out the Spanish class to see if we wanted to take it in high school and I realized that I just can't pronounce anything! I especially can't do that weird tongue roll thing. This is why I took French in high school. It's too bad I'm required to take a Spanish class here!

6- I love romance movies. "Chick flicks" are just fun to watch. Tia and I could sit and watch them together every night!

7- I have naturally horrible teeth. I have had problems with my teeth since I was a little kid. At the age of 4 I had to be in the hospital for oral surgery to have those silver caps put on a bunch of my teeth. This runs in my family- my mom has dentures and she's only in her mid-thirties.

Since most of the people on my blog list have already received this award I am going to just say if you are reading this and don't have it, take it! You deserve it. <3

Thursday, September 24, 2009

When I go home this weekend (finally!) I am going to make tons of food using the apples my family went to pick last weekend. I've been collecting recipes this week and I had a hard time choosing! I can't make all of them, I found too many that I liked.

I think I am going to make- The Maple Baked Apple Bites Suzie talked about over on her blog. Apple crisp (and possibly freeze it.) Make and freeze either apple pies or apple turnovers. Make and can applesauce.

And I am really curious about how it will taste so I want to make some fried apple pies with a recipe I found. I mean, fried apple pie sounds awesome! Paula Dean, my heart would be healthier without you- but my taste buds would be missing out!

I am going to forgo the apple raisin muffins, apple zeppole, and apple spice glazed donuts. They sound good, but I don't have the time! I will share recipes for the other things sometime soon. I probably won't read blogs while at home, I am going to have so much to do. I will read my emails and update on Twitter, but only because they take only a few moments. I'm so happy to be able to spend time with my family. This weekend is going to rock.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Happy Mabon to all Pagans! To any non-Pagans, happy first day of Autumn! I wish I had remembered sooner, I guess I've just been busy. I'm enjoying the colorful leaves, I even risked looking like a leaf peeper by taking some pictures this morning.

Often around Mabon we remember the myth of Persephone and Demeter. While eating grapes this morning, though, I recalled the story of the god Dionysus (aka Bacchus). As a god of the harvest he, like Demeter, symbolizes the death and rebirth cycle of nature. He has appealed to me since I first began researching him last year.

Unfortunately I don't live near a place where I can pick my own grapes, but we can pick our own apples! That has been a tradition in my family since I was little. We always go apple picking every year. They went last weekend, so there will be plenty of apples for me to make yummy stuff with when I go home this weekend. If anyone has any awesome apple recipes they think I should try, please post them or a link to them.

Monday, September 21, 2009

So, today is 'faculty day' which means no classes! I only wish I had known that before I drove all the way there... Ah well a free afternoon is a free afternoon! My morning was spent at an internship seminar. Here at NECI there is a mandatory 6 month (paid!) internship. I have no clue where I want to go for my internship, but I'll figure it out. I know the type of restaurant I want to work in, the same kind I want to eventually own, so I guess that's a good place to start.

My cousin and I went to dinner last night at one of the NECI owned restaurants. It is much fancier than we are used to! I got venison, which really didn't taste like venison. The reason? It was farm raised. How weird is that?! It tasted more like beef, not gamey at all. It was actually disappointing. It's been forever since I had venison, and when I do get it it doesn't taste like I remember. I wasn't surprised that the meal wasn't like I expected, I haven't eaten much here at college that I have liked. Yeah it's a culinary school, but we eat in a cafeteria with crappy cafeteria food. And whenever I go to one of the NECI restaurants I leave slightly disappointed with the meal. I can't wait until I go home next weekend! I'm going to make food I like and eat at a restaurant or two that I know I like. Plus I'll get to see my family and pets.

With my free afternoon I plan on checking out the NECI website a bit to look more into the pre-authorized internship sights. Later we are going to go to dinner and to see Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. I hear it's a good movie.

Edit- Back from the movie theatre. Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs is amazing!

Now, just because I feel like sharing some random things-

I am re-reading the Oh My Gods! comics right now. I know I posted about this comic strip a while ago, but I think it's amazing. The creator hasn't posted a new comic since March, but he's been busy. He plans on starting it up again as soon as he can. Until then, if you've never read them there are 2100 to read! The strip started back in 2002.

My cousin has Stephen Lynch songs stuck in my head. She listens to his songs all the time. They are not appropriate, but they are wicked funny!

And lastly, have you heard of Johnny the Homicidal Maniac? I haven't had the chance to read the comics, but I am dying to! Someone animated the first comic and put it on YouTube. I'm looking forward to December when my birthday and Christmas roll around, because the books will definitely be on my list.

"Life is too short to wake up with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason, and if you get a second chance, grab it with both hands; if it changes your life, let it. Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it." -Unknown