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26 February 2012

If you had the chance to let the world know just one thing about you, what would it be?

I had a dream last night that clung to me for hours after sleep had turned to half-sleep and then awake.

I was in an impossibly large crowd of people. Oprah was hosting some kind of major event. I was sitting in the crowd, holding Austen. And one by one, she asked people the question I asked at the beginning of this post:

What is the one thing you want the world to know about you?

And the whole world was listening.

I remember other people sharing, but I don't remember the particulars of their stories. When it came to be my turn, I said this:

"My firstborn, my son Ewan, was born with a heart that was broken -- quite literally broken. He died in my arms when he was 16 days old. This baby girl, his little sister Austen, is our second and it's because of her brother's life and death that she's so incredibly special to us."

There it was: the answer I gave in my dream is just as true when I'm awake. My heart has known all along that if I had to tell the world just one thing, it would be about my children. It would be to tell them about Ewan to make sure he's not forgotten, and to tell them about the beautiful little sister he watches over. It would be to say the thing that, though the world might not see it, is on every breath and in every heartbeat.

It would be to say that one true thing -- that if people can know just one single thing about me, it would be to speak of the ones who hold the greatest claim on my heart.

What about you?
If you could tell the world just one thing about yourself, what would it be?