Dirty Stop’s Out – Dj Trev’s guide to pubs, dives and other skives

Skapegoat Kelly are playing The Blues Bar, they have a good following so that should be a decent gig and for clubbing action has Viper Rooms with their student night “YOLO” for R’n’B/Urban type stuff, which is also what Tex plays upstairs at Rehab at their night “Flex”. Also club wise I play downstairs at Rehab, largely doing Rock and Indie, plus the odd guilty pleasure. My night used to be called “Don’t Stop Believing” but I don’t think anyone knows that any more, the night isn’t really worthy of a name as I change what I play according to who is in. Lets just call it Thursday downstairs at Rehab shall we? It’s free in at any rate (I wouldn’t pay to get in). I think Moko is also open on Thursdays but am not best placed to find out, due to my obvious other commitments of playing records people don’t like, too loudly, too quietly, or too annoyingly.

Topper most tips:

I would say probably my top tip for tonight, given that it’s been a nice sunny day, is (if you’re in the market for some straight up pubbing as opposed to clubbing and all the unpleasant orangeness of girls that is associated with nightclubs), is Christies has a pub quiz on tonight and is a good pub too. It’s either that or back to the live stuff, The Dan Burnett Band play The Alexandra tonight. I’ve not seen Dan’s current band but he’s a great entertainer so if you fancy a spot of live music this will be a good night out. He does have a bit of a “David Brent” little beard thing going on, but don’t judge people by their facial hair. Please.

FRIDAY – 17 May

My top tip would be the monthly Geek pub quiz at Retro Bar. Prizes for this usually include things like Play Stations and SNES game systems; everyone I know who goes says its really funny and different, doors open 7.30pm so get your geek on. NB to teenagers: “getting your geek on” involves more than wearing a T-Shirt that says “GEEK” on it. I think the T-Shirt you are looking for is “TOOL”. But they are a band too. So probably stick to that one well cool good clothing company “RAMONES” who are currently so “ON TREND”.

Another good looking (in that it looks like a good line up, the people involved are fugly as fug) is at Zoso. Pips (awesome), Recovery (awesome), Adam Graham (no idea), Dave Sowden (funny) and Dj Monkey (Scottish) complete the line up and having read that back it’s such a good line up I’m going to have to make that a top tip too. It’s free to get in, honestly Pips and Recovery are excellent, that’s not to disparage the other people involved, but we had Pips at Bottom of the Bottle last week and they are just class, whilst Recovery has Jonny Skinner on vocals and he is well fit. Which makes my previous remarks about them all being ugly clearly a lie. I lie, who knew?

Harrogate Theatre’s “Studio Theatre” has Peacock and Gamble on with their comedy show, whilst in the big room (I’m not sure theater goers refer to the big room as the big room, but then I’m not sure theater goers read guides that are mainly about bars and clubs, the philistines) Donizetti’s “Don Pasquale” is an opera written by Frank Donizetti about Joe Pasquale and the troubles he faced growing up in Doncaster.

Dan Burnett continues his take over of Harrogate with a night of Live Piano music at The Den, entry is free and they do food til 8pm too, there’s more live music down at Christies who have Al Leeming playing live also in live music The Blues Bar has The Paddy McGuire band, that may of may not be the hard bloke off shameless.

If anyone is reading this in Knaresborough, The Board Inn has a band playing tonight. I’m mainly mentioning it as they are called “Ice Hole” which is perhaps the best band name ever. I like Knaresborough and there are some well good pubs there so I might start listing stuff there too. So if Knaresborough council could unlock the necessary funding needed to deal the sudden influx of people this coverage will undoubtedly bring to the town that would be great. A man in a yellow vest standing at the train station looking confused and saying “so when are they coming?” should probably cover it.

SATURDAY – 18 May

Last week whilst in the course of my daily chuntering I found myself describing a group of people younger than me as “teens”. I was nearly sick and wondered at what point I became someone who talked about rowdy teens with their loud music and stupid haircuts… I can only really redeem myself from this by running a night of super cool underground dance music, dubstep and all that other stuff that doesn’t sound like music because it’s got no words and all sounds the same. To that end: Clearly I’m going to say my night Vigilance is my top tip at Zoso. It’s free to get in, there’s Dj sets from new local talent Zentec & Dj Rum Chaser, plus sets from the more established Sixus and the more past it me (Dj Trev, patent pending), plus a headline set from Bradford’s Dub Reactions who are excellent Dub, Dubstep and general Bass Djs. This is arguably Harrogate’s most underground dance night, mainly because not many people come to it…

Dj Pieman with Dj Trev

In the world of overground music, Dj Pieman does alt. pop and rock on the top floor at Rehab and downstairs Dj Wayne plays Faithless “Insomnia” while James Oliver prepares for the opening of his restaurant over the road by playing up front dance music. I’m assuming its the same guy, even if it seems somewhat unlikely. If I shared the same name, albeit slightly different, as Jamie Oliver I’d probably change my Dj name to something that sounds totally un DJ like, like DJ Trev, or Jaques la Conte (editorial note: Tim, this is an actual famous DJ’s name, not a crude joke, so please leave it in; also, when is my cheque getting posted out?).

The Blues Bar has got The Jed Thomas Blues Band as they do every week, and, as I do every week, I’ve forgotten to find out at what time.

Darren J Daz DJ’s at Lure on Saturdays, Disco Dave (Commercial Dance) and Tex (Soul & R’n’B) play Revolution, Moko Lounge has their “Smooch” club night and Viper rooms are open also for late night clubbing. Viper tends to be a more grown up crowd on a Saturday, so if anyone my age is reading this you should go there, and still be to old to be in a nightclub. Grow up already.

SUNDAY 19 May

Unusually for a Sunday (excluding when Bottom of the bottle is on, obvs) I’ve got a top tip for the night: The Blues Bar has a “Midnight Special” blues and soul night on (and get this! I know what time it starts, 9pm!). I don’t know what it’ll be like but the Blues is such a cool place you can’t really go wrong. You could try, but you would fail. Also in the afternoon they have Druce and Jones, but I’m clueless as to what they do. In fact, I’m just clueless. The more observant of you will have sussed this out by now, well done have a biscuit.

Viper’s regular Sunday club night Peekaboo is on as is my Sunday residency at Rehab, I play pretty much anything that flies, whilst Viper rooms is a little more R’nBish and “street”.

Oh my god (NB to teens: this means OMG), Dan Burnett is back again tonight, this time at Montey’s. He’s playing a blues set there, though what he’s got to be blue about I don’t know, as this is his third gig this weekend. Maybe he’s like me, and get upset when he has to pick YET ANOTHER tshirt to wear for a gig. Gawd. But (unlike me) he’s got the tunes to do 3 sets in one town in one weekend (and all I’m doing is playing other peoples CD’s, Dan is actually singing and playing songs. Sucker.). SO go check him out, he’ll probably buy you a pint after such a big weekend, failing that you can get a cocktail off Edi behind the bar, or get lost in Edi from behind the bars rakish good looks.

The Fat Badger runs their pub quiz on Sundays and always have some quality real ales on tap, if you like the Badger you should check out their monthly beer club on, I went last Tuesday and it was brilliant. I unfortunately don’t know when the next one is even though I have seen a poster, as when I saw it I’d been at Beer Club for 4 hours.

Oh, get this, something at the Theater I can genuinely rave about: Noddy Holder (NB to teens: Not a receptacle to put “ur” fave Enid Blighton character in) is in conversation with Mark Radcliffe. To be fair, I’d most like to go to see Mark Radcliffe as I genuinely think he’s one of the best DJ’s the BBC have ever had, but Noddy Holder is a character isn’t he, so this should be a really entertaining affair. If ANYONE from the theater is reading this, I’D REALLY LIKE TO GO. Urgh, I’m trying to blag free something here aren’t I? I feel dirty and cheap. And it’s not washing off!

MONDAY – 20 May

Monday’s have a wide range of options, particularly given that for most people Mondays are the night they sit at home wondering where it all went wrong and planning their time so they can sit and write THE great British novel. If you wish to procrastinate on that, perhaps you should first step foot outside the door and examine the British peoples, in their natural environs. To that end, how about a classic pub quiz? Dj Pieman runs one every Monday at the Alex and it would make a great second chapter.

Up the road the excellent Coach and Horses pub does Bangers and Mash on Mondays, whilst for late night entertainment Tom Kellet is the quintessential English man (in his mind) and runs an open mic session at Zoso Bar. Also what is more British than Karaoki, at Moko Lounge? Probably quite a lot, but it’s a good laugh and by this time you’ll have changed the central protagonist in your novel to some kind of talking lobster.

Toppermost Tip

I’m not really sure where I’m going with this novel thing, as I’ve never once sat down and tried to write a book, say, about a dj struggling to make it in a nightmare vision of the future world run by nazi robots…. So moving on, my top tip for the night is that Suggs out of Madness is on at the Harrogate Theatre, I reckon that’ll be good. I would go but I’m meeting my publisher. Well, he says he is a publisher, but I’m not sure they generally use plastic carrier bags as shoes.

TUESDAY – 21 May

Please note, there is nothing happening on Tuesday that doesn’t happen each week, so I’ve more or less just copied and pasted what I wrote last week. I could probably do this for every night and save myself loads of time which I could use to write my book.

There is the Folk night at the Tap n’ Spile every Tuesday, but if you couldn’t give a folk about that, at the club end of the spectrum Moko has a night two rooms, one with Jay Selway’s Rock Box and the other with a really good commercial DJ doing good upfront stuff. I didn’t see who it was playing when I was in there but both rooms were playing good stuff. Jay also runs Rock Box pub night at the Regency.

The Electro Jam continues at Zoso on Tuesdays and is a nice night out. They seem to rotate the Djs more often now so if you don’t like what one jock is doing you don’t have to wait long for another to be on. Hardcore Dave plays some hardcore too, which is something you don’t get enough of in Harrogate, so mad props to him and all the Harrogate Hardcrew. Again.

WEDNESDAYS – 22 May

Dj Pieman is on at Rehab on Wednesdays and despite my heartfelt plea last week for other details of ANYTHING that is on on Wednesdays, I’ve heard nowt. I am beginning to suspect Dj Pieman is paying them hush money.

SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION (applies to every day of the year)

Harrogatealternativeradio.co.uk let’s me play some songs and talk a bit on saturdays 10pm to midnight and again again on Thursdays at 2pm, or if you miss that, you can listen to old shows I done on line at mixcloud.com/djtrevuk, the one I did last week should be online around about now. You should listen to it whilst reading this, it will be a multi medai Dj Trev fest. Although you’ve more or less finished reading this by now… Hmm, bear it in mind for next week would you?

I do swear somewhat on my internet show, plus I swear like blooming fudge on facebook.com/djtrev so don’t go there either… and smash your computer up right now just to make sure…. (NB to teens; I will not be buying you a new computer if you break that one; you’ll have to ask your mum.)

Thanks for reading, drink responsibly and don’t be loose with your affections.

Trev x x x

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