For folks who enjoy spewing snide comments and one-liners at crappy
films, it's been a long, lonely eight years since production on "Mystery
Science Theater 3000" finally came to a halt. Fortunately, however,
recent years have found a plethora of "MST3K" alumni returning to do
what they do best: making fun of bad movies. First, Mike Nelson teamed
with Legend
Films to offer commentary tracks for classics like
"Plan
9 from Outer Space" and the original "Little Shop
of Horrors." Then, Nelson founded the website Rifftrax.com,
where, for a paltry $2.99 a pop, he's begun providing downloadable
commentary for more recent cinematic catastrophes like "Eragon,"
"Glitter," "The
Wicker Man," and even a couple of "Star Trek" flicks.

Given that Nelson has been occasionally joined at Rifftrax by some
of his former "MST" compatriots, it's perhaps not too surprising to
find that he's once again teamed up with Kevin Murphy (the former Tom
Servo) and Bill Corbett (he who once voiced Crow T. Robot) for a new
project: "The
Film Crew." Bullz-Eye had a chance to talk to Nelson
and Murphy – on the morning of our interview, Corbett was far too busy
waiting for his wife to go into labor to speak with us (the nerve of
some people!) – and we quizzed them about the new gig, why they didn't
just revive "Mystery Science Theater 3000," what it's like to watch
a film where Rue McClanahan plays a stripper, and if Mariah Carey's
"Glitter" is really as bad as everyone says it is.

Yeah, we know: that last one's pretty much rhetorical. But we knew
we'd get a good answer out of them…and we were right.

KM: It's the smell of the rubber, you know? The plastic…?
It still outgases after ten years! It just makes me nauseous, sitting
in that trench and smelling the puppet.

"'Mystery Science Theater' was
kind of gone. Re-creating that would've been a pretty monstrous
undertaking…yet we still have fun making fun of movies. There
seemed to be sort of a demand for it, so, short of 'Mystery
Science Theater,' this is what we have." – Kevin Murphy

MN: And, plus, the level that Kevin would have to stand
next to me was so disturbing.

KM: I always looked at Mike's thighs. I was at thigh-level
for ten years with the poor guy. It was a little scary. (Laughs) But,
y'know, I don't know. We just…"Mystery Science Theater" was kind of gone.
Re-creating that would've been a pretty monstrous undertaking…yet we
still have fun making fun of movies. There seemed to be sort of a demand
for it, so, short of "Mystery Science Theater," this is what we have.

BE: So, Kevin, was it hard for you to step out from
behind the comfort of Tom Servo and actually appear onscreen?

KM: Well, you know, for many years, I've dwelled in
blissful anonymity because nobody could recognize me by the occasional
glimpses of my wrist that you could see when I did my bad puppeteering.
And, otherwise, I wore a monkey mask. So I was always fine with that.
I'm not saying that "The Film Crew" will launch me into Will Smith's
brand of fortune… (Laughs) …but I'm always a little self-conscious
when I see my big, wrinkly kisser on the screen.

BE: But, of course, I guess you still spend most of
your time off-screen, anyway.

KM: It's true. Which is good. There are only little
glimpses of us, as freakish sort of "Three Stooges" simulacra.

BE: I guess it would've been too easy to appear in
silhouette on this show as well.

(Both laugh)

KM: Yeah, actually, that would've been painful.

BE: Well, I've had a chance to watch the first volume,
where you guys tackle "Hollywood After Dark."

KM: It's fun, huh?

BE: Rue McClanahan as a stripper: was that the only
bit of information that you needed to know that this was a must-do film
for you guys?

MN: It was kind of a…when we heard that, we asked,
"Why has no-one brought this movie to the American viewing public?" I
mean, we're doing a service there.

BE: And the fact that it was made in 1968 but it's
still in black and white: I guess they were attempting to
go noir…?

KM: Yeah, they really did try to go grim. They were
a little late. But they had the nice string ties, which I liked, and
they called each other "baby" a lot. I loved that.

BE: So which do you think was worse: that we didn't
actually get to see Rue bare all, or simply that we saw as
much as we did?

MN: Any more and, actually, it would've been the trigger
for the end of the world. The seventh seal would've been opened. And
I think they knew that even back then, even back in those carefree days
of the '60s.

KM: They had the good sense to contain it.

BE: I know that "Killers from Space" is another title
that you guys are doing, but are there any other titles that
are on deck at the moment?

KM: Actually, there are two others that are up there,
and they're both in glorious color, so the kids'll be excited about that…because,
apparently, black and white movies are invisible to children under 17
years old.

BE: And, occasionally, my wife.

"One of the youngsters in the
office said that their buddy was looking at a copy of Spin Magazine,
and 'The Film Crew' was mentioned. That was one of the things they
were excited about, in a list of top-ten things. And the one right
below us was 'a blow-up doll for your dog to hump.' And I thought,
'That's perfect! That fits us exactly.'"KM: There's just a blank screen. They don't see anything.
They say, "What are you watching? Why don't you turn on the television?"
"But I'm watching 'The Killers'!" Or, "I'm watching a Sam Fuller movie!"
"No, I don't see anything!" So we have to have a couple of color movies
in there, and one of them is a delightful sort of prehistoric sex comedy
called "The Wild Women of Wongo."

BE: Very nice.

KM: Yeah. And the other is…it's not a "Hercules" movie,
but, doggone it, it sure feels like one. It's "Giant of Marathon." There's
really no giant.

MN: No.

KM: But there is a marathon!

MN: It is a faithful retelling of the first marathon,
only with a lot more male genitalia waved in your face.

KM: (Laughs)

BE: Uh, will those be pixilated for the screen?

MN: (Laughs) Well, it's behind a thin layer
of level, so we can get away with it.

KM: It's very "300"-y.

MN: It is. It is a perfect time for it, because there
were a whole bunch of "300"s before this "300."

KM: That's right. There were probably about three…hundred.

MN: (Laughs) And Steve Reeves was in 299 of them, just
so you know.

BE: You guys have a pretty significant internet presence.
Do you keep in touch with your fans via E-mail or discussion
boards?

BE: It is very nice. Speaking of Rifftrax,
Mike, I know you've had other "MST" alumni besides just Kevin. Do you
anticipate similar guest spots on future "Film Crew" DVDs?

MN: Well, we hope there are future "Film
Crew" DVDs. We have to see what happens with them. I mean, I think the
world has been screaming for "Hollywood After Dark," but, apparently,
y'know, it's not a foregone conclusion. So we'll see what happens.

BE: Kevin, you've been on several of the Rifftrax,
but the only one I've had a chance to download has been "Star
Trek V." Between the bunch of you, what have been your favorites?

KM: Uh, well, that "Star Trek V" one was really
quite fun.

MN: Kevin and I just did "Generations," speaking of
"Star Trek," which I was quite fond of. Once the pain of writing and
performing is over and you can just kind of relax, I quite enjoyed it.

KM: You get Shatner and Data, and you get
Chekov! You get the three biggest over-actors! DeForest Kelley was, unfortunately,
dead. But they still could've dragged him out.

BE: How bad was "Glitter"? Because I'm just not sure
I have the strength to watch it, even with your commentary.

MN: You know, "Glitter"…I would not wave you away from
that one. It's got all the elements of a…it's so bad, and, yet, there's
a little touch of the "Road House" bad about it, where there are moments
that just make you laugh out loud just on their own. And I was shocked
by that. People who said it was the worst movie ever made didn't tell
me it was also one of the most delightful bad movies ever made. (Laughs)

BE: Kevin, have you seen that one? I know you're not
on the commentary for that one, but…

KM: I have. And I very much enjoyed it. And I also
enjoyed Mike's solo effort on "Over the Top"…

BE: Ah, yes.

KM: …because it is a gem, and it does have these mild…and
I don't want to exaggerate anything here…but mild "Road House"-ian qualities.

MN: One must always be careful not to expand it into
genuine "Road House" territory.

KM: Well, we don't want to blaspheme or anything.

MN: No, exactly.

KM: But, you know, truly, my favorite so far, I think,
is "The Wicker Man." Because it's Nicolas Cage, and it's Neil LaBute,
and it's so ridiculous, and it's so aggressively…it's like David Mamet:
not only do I hate women, I'm scared shitless of them, and I'm gonna
make a movie about it.

MN: I find myself…if I'm encountering a stern woman
who is unyielding, usually clerks or office workers, I want to just call
them out and say, "Calm down, Sister Beech," but…

KM: (Starts laughing)

MN: …but only about three people in the world would
know what the hell I was talking about.

KM: The rest might get confused and hit you.

MN: Yeah, exactly.

"Apparently, black and white
movies are invisible to children under 17 years old. There's
just a blank screen. They don't see anything. They say, 'What
are you watching? Why don't you turn on the television?'
'But I'm watching "The
Killers"!'
Or, 'I'm watching a Sam Fuller movie!' 'No, I don't see anything!'" –
Kevin Murphy

BE: You know, you were talking about "Road House,"
and a few months back, we did a feature called the Badass
Bracket, where James Dalton was in our original match-up of the
32 biggest badasses.

KM: All right!

BE: Unfortunately, he didn't make it past the first
round.

MN: Aw, damn!

BE: But, still, he made the cut. The problem was that
he was up against Maximus, from "Gladiator." Not really a
fair fight.

KM: Hard to beat.

BE: Mike, how did Neil Patrick Harris get into the
mix for Rifftrax? (Writer's note: Harris teams up with Nelson to
tackle "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.")

MN: Well, I was just thinking it would be fun. One
of the elements of RiffTrax is that, because there's not a big production
to mount – it's relatively small – it'd be fun to get other people involved
and see who could do it. And his name came up. He'd been sort of a fan
of "Mystery Science" back in his "Doogie Howser" days, so I just got
in touch with him, and he knew what RiffTrax was, and he got it, and
he said, "Yeah, that'd be fun." So we just drove up to L.A. one day,
to a studio near him, and we'd sent him a script, and I was expecting
the ranting and raving, "I would never say this! Neil Patrick Harris
doesn't talk like this!" But he just did everything word for word. "Oh,
this is funny!" "Are you sure you're okay with it?" "Yeah, no problem!"
So it was really a delight to work with a Hollywood star who's a nice
guy and very funny.

BE: Kevin, when I spoke to Mike before, I told him
that I enjoyed his books, but I also really liked yours:
"A Year at the Movies."

KM: Why, thank you!

BE: And I understand that it resulted in you being
mentioned in "Ripley's Believe It Or Not!"

KM: It did! I've got this wonderful framed image of
that. I'm in there with some poodle that was of some note, and then there's
me. It says, "Kevin Murphy went to the theater for 365 days in a row,"
and it had a little cartoon of a seat reserved for me. The only thing
that might've been better would've been if I'd appeared in the comic
strip "Barney Google and Snuffy Smith." That would've been true fame.

MN: You know, along those lines, Kevin, one of the
youngsters in the office said that their buddy was looking at a copy
of Spin Magazine, and "The Film Crew" was mentioned. That was one of
the things they were excited about, in a list of top-ten things. And
the one right below us was "a blow-up doll for your dog to hump." And
I thought, "That's perfect! That fits us exactly."

KM: (Laughs) That's great. That's nice to
know, that we're right in there with the inflatable dog love doll.

BE: Sorry, but did you say you were above the doll
or below it?

MN: I'm pretty sure we were above it, because that's
what made me so proud.

BE: So, Kevin, how did that book come about? I mean,
did you pitch it to the publisher, or did someone at the
publishing house have the bright idea?

KM: I pitched it. I had an editor
friend at Harper Collins – he edited "The Mystery Science Theater Amazing
Colossal Episode Guide," which we wrote – and he said, "Whenever you've
got an idea for a book, send it my way." And, truly, I'd stopped going
to the theater while I was working on "Mystery Science Theater," because
we were working too late, and it was just too painful to go watch a
movie all day and then go out and watch a movie. So I started going
regularly when "Mystery Science Theater" was over, and I hated it,
and I wanted to figure out why. And I'd done a little bit of traveling,
and I realized that just about everywhere else in the world, moviegoing
was more fun. So I thought I'd do a survey of moviegoing at the turn
of the century from the point of view of a moviegoer...but I needed
a gimmick. So that's what the gimmick was: to go to a theater and see
a movie every day for an entire year. And that was enough to sell the
book!

BE: Mike, do you have any books in the works? I know
you've written several.

MN: You know, I'm supposed to be writing books. People
are owed books by me. But I have to admit, I'm making a public confession
right here: I'm too busy to work on them. So I have nothing to report
on those lines.

BE: Are you still doing stuff for Legend Films?

MN: Yes, right now, I'm ensconced within the belly
of Legend Films as I talk to you. But 99.9% of my stuff involves RiffTrax.
It's just that we're partnered up on RiffTrax.

BE: Kevin, on your website, you wrote an essay about
actors who sing, posing the question, "Who will win the Nimoy
prize?"

KM: Yes, the coveted Leonard Nimoy prize.

BE: Were you at all surprised that Nimoy's '60s single,
"The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins," wasn't reissued in the midst
of all the "Lord of the Rings" hoopla a few years ago?

KM: You know, I figured it would be, but, then, all
of the people who were in charge of the "Lord of the Rings" merchandise
probably just simply listened to it. That's all you have to
do. It's so flat, it seems like he's reading an essay rather than singing
a song. It was just so flat and frightening. I know it's made it out
there, and it's funny to see the
video that went along with it, when he was on one of those ABC
afternoon kids pop shows, like "Hullabaloo" or "Where the Action Is,"
and he's looking all rock, with his Beatle boots and his turtleneck,
singing… (Begins a very credible impression of Leonard Nimoy singing) "Bilbo!
Bilbo Baggins!" It's delightful. So it's too bad that it didn't get released
in a special platinum edition.

BE: Two more quick ones. First off, any idea if "Mystery
Science Theater 3000: The Movie" is ever going to be reissued
on DVD?

"I would not wave you away from
('Glitter'). It's so bad, and, yet, there's a little touch
of the 'Road House' bad about it, where there are moments that just
make you laugh out loud just on their own. And I was shocked by that.
People who said it was the worst movie ever made didn't tell me it
was also one of the most delightful bad movies ever made."
– Mike
NelsonMN: No! Somebody was asking me about this yesterday,
and I recalled the moment when I knew we were no longer good buddies
with the studio: they sent a couple of DVDs in a box to our place, and
I thought, "Oh, good!" I figured they'd discovered that I was an early
adopter of the DVD format and was into that. But there was a terse note
in there that just said, "Please sign these and return at once." So,
since then, they haven't called me or let me know what they're going
to do with the movie or anything. It's just been sort of…it's the forgotten
episode. It's like we've been wiped out of the Soviet pictures of what
happened during the Universal days.

KM: Our relationship with Universal sort of bounced
between neglect and outright hostility.

MN: (Laughs)

KM: I remember we went back for something, we were
visiting a friend there, and Casey Silver, who was the president of the
studio…this is after they sort of killed the release of the film because
"Barb Wire" was coming out…and we're walking through the offices, and
there's Casey Silver, and he says, "Hey, guys! We making a sequel? BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA!"

MN: Just an open taunt, right in the halls of Universal.

KM: We got taunted by our supposed boss! It was quite
a Hollywood moment.

BE: When the reissue of "This Island Earth" (the
film skewered in "MST3K: The Movie") came out on DVD a little
while ago, I couldn't believe they didn't just slip it on there as
an Easter egg or something.

BE: And last question: any idea why "MST3K" hasn't
really been in reruns? It's certainly being reissued on DVD,
but you never actually see it airing anywhere anymore.

MN: I think…I dunno, it's the rights, I guess. Since
we started the show, from what I understand with my many copyright friends,
is that things have changed so much. Things can get pulled back out of
public domain, and the law has changed so much, that I guess nobody wants
to risk it. It is a legal minefield now, with people buying back up properties
that they had long presumed were in the public domain. I think that's
part of it. Also, maybe…I don't know, but to the modern eye, will "MST3K"
look like a bunch of strange weirdos in funny hair and suits and so forth?
I don't know.

BE: We can only hope.

MN: (Laughs)

BE: Well, it's been great talking to you guys.

KM: Okay, Will, well, thank you very much!

MN: Good talking to you, too, Will.

BE: And fingers crossed that things take off for "The
Film Crew," because I'm really digging it.