So, I'm new to menstrual cups. I have a Diva Cup, size 1. I'm on my second attempt with it.

My first attempt was last month. My best friend gave me hers to try. She cuts the stems off. I got it in, no issues. It migrated on and immediately sealed itself around my cervix. I tried for 5 days and couldn't even reach the base of it, let alone get a grip on it, (my husband even gave it a try) before finally getting a doctor's appointment and giving my gyno a fun new experience (it was over Thanksgiving weekend, so I had no choice but to wait that long.)

Not one to be deterred by medical mishaps, I decided to give it another go. Bought a new one that had it's stem, popped it in Thursday around midnight, went in fine, and now I can't get the sucker out. Again. I can at least reach it this time, but I cannot, for the life of me, break the seal. And I don't want to just yank it out because I have an IUD, and my gyno was concerned about that.

I also can't seem to get my thumb and finger in there at the same time. Fingers or thumb, but not both. My best attempt so far has been by using my thumb to push it against my pelvic bone, and then using that leverage to slide it (which is what i do with the disposable softcups), but that just doesn't break the seal.

Any advice on breaking the seal? I'm gonna have to get a new gyno, otherwise...lol

If you get aroused the walls of the vagina soften, you'll produce some lubrication and you will mentally relax which is really the key here. Considering the previous experience you had, you probably are tightening your muscles which just draws everything up and out of reach.

So I would recommend getting turned on and doing some physical relaxation movements especially for your abdomen and pelvis. Just roll around on your bed, get on all fours and do 'cat cow' (yoga motion) take deep breaths and psych yourself into a confident, calm, relaxed state. Remember that the worse that can happen is another trip to your doctor, but you are safe and won't be harmed.

Get into the tub (no worries about clean-up) and squat or kneel; you can put down a towel for comfort. Try to get into your mind that you are not scared, you are going to get the cup out and it is not going to hurt. Think about relaxing every single muscle around your pelvis, take some deep breaths and imagine everything relaxing and drawing down and out toward the earth. Keep a steady, slow, deep, breath, remember that you can reach the cup and with your clean fingers reach up into your vagina while gently pushing down but keeping relaxed pelvic floor muscles.

When you reach the stem, since you will, stay calm, don't get too excited, wiggle the cup side to side while walking it down. When you get it down a little, which you will, keep your lower abdomen relaxed and still pushing down and out a little and move your grip up the cup to pinch the base. Keep wiggling and walking it down until you can grip more of the cup. You should be able to pinch it enough to break the seal or let some air in through the holes. Try twisting/rotating the cup a little if air doesn't seem to get in. It might take a minute because the holes are small. You can get your cup out.

If you decide to use the cup again, try to let it open before it is all the way in and then push it up. When you insert a folded cup and it opens, something has to fill that space. Usually it's a little air but it can suck in your cervix if air can't get in. You could try pulling your stomach up while you are inserting to draw some air into your vagina making some space for the cup to open without suctioning itself to your cervix.

Good luck! You got this. You could enlist a longer fingered friend (husband?) if you have short fingers.Last ditch effort, you could try having sex and hoping the action will break the seal and loosen your vaginal walls. It would be an experiment though.

I really like mossmorton's advice. You can definitely get it out with the right angle. The vagina is not an endless tunnel, fortunately. :)

The only thing I would add is that I really don't think you have to worry about your IUD. Cups don't actually create "suction," it's just a seal, and even if it did, from what I've heard it's really not possible for suction inside of the vagina to pull something out of the uterus. When I told the NP who inserted my IUD that I used a menstrual cup, she didn't act as if that would be a problem. I think as far as expulsions go, it's not actually the cup that causes expulsion... if expulsion is going to happen, then it's just going to happen, in cup users or in non-cup users. Also, if you are anxious about that, that could be carrying over and making you tense up during removal. Which brings me back to mossmorton's advice... ;) Just relax, and know that your IUD is where it needs to be, and it's not going anywhere!

Exceptions to this might be the LilyCup, which has NO suction release holes at all. Mine would routinely sucker onto my cervix and create cramping. Luckily I figured out how to unseal it without necessarily pulling down, but I could definitely see a Lily taking out an IUD. That's the only cup designed like that, though. I never had problems with the FemmyCycle (also hole-less) suckering onto me.

But the IUD isn't removed using suction, it's removed (with the help of medical instruments) by pulling the strings to close the "T" arms and make it a straight line that will come out through the os. So I really don't think suction would be a problem for the IUD, unless you somehow catch and pull the strings. However if you're already having problems removing a cup that *does* have air holes, then yeah I'd definitely not try one without any, lol.

Obviously I'm not a medical doctor, but from what I've heard even different doctors will give different answers (most of them being, err on the side of safety juuust in case, which makes senseif you're liable for a patient's health and safety), so I really think the whole "menstrual cup pulling out your IUD" thing is totally inconclusive.

I ended up taking a long bath, then sitting on the toilet, leaning back, inserting a spatula handle inside my vagina under the cup (between it and my bum), and then pressing the top side of the cup down onto that with my thumb, and using the two to slide it out.