I noticed that you have a lot of threads about women and how they should act and be treated.
I discovered a situation that I have not yet found the answer to. You see, just the other day I walked in on my wife in the shower (I don't allow her to lock any doors in the house, unless I say otherwise) and I was led to believe that she was pleasuring herself. We have a retractable shower head, and when I walked in, it was near her devil's layer and she seemed unusually embarrassed.

Though I did punish her, I don't know what else to do beyond these lines.
I need advice on what the right thing to do would be.

Looks like you will be liberated after having one up the jacksy, with a shower head in the back of a 3/4 tonner milsum me old mucker!!

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Tom, you are aware that Milsum is also the possessor of a front bottom as well aren't you, and that she might actually being staunchly in favour of the liberal use of shower heads? She is the devils spawn come to haunt us in our rectitude!