Rants

Melissa Nelson, a dental assistant in Iowa was fired because her boss stated that she was too sexy and he couldn’t handle it. She worked there for a total 0f 10 years but it took him 9 years to figure that out. That’s when he began “complaining” to her via text messages. It is a mere coincidence that he was also experiencing marriage struggles at the same time. The (all male) judges sides with the dentist in the first and second round in court. The woman lost her job.

I am sure we are all siding with the dentist. Who would want to feel a boner against his pelvis because the doctor is aroused again by his assistant that all out of the sudden gets him aroused over and over again?

Yeah, right. I have a confession to make to the shareholders of BOA and Deutsche Bank. Your management put two hotties on the trading floors where I used to work and this might have cost the banks millions due to the bloodstream irregularities of the male trading staff as soon as those two walked in every morning. It’s a mere miracle that you didn’t loose everything and those banks are still in business.

You have most probably heard of the Bang with Friends Facebook App by now. It made the rounds on nearly all social media blogs last week. It let’s you select which of your friends you’d have sex with. If one of those chosen ones decides that “banging” you would be a good idea as well you’d both be alerted and set on your path to eternal happiness.

When I thought it wouldn’t get better than that an app named Bang with Professionals came around. It let’s you pick your objects of desire from your LinkedIn contacts. Not as in “f#ck this guy, he’s an a##hole” but as in “yes, I’d have sex with her/him”.

Pretty cool, eh? Guess how cool it would be if that database gets hacked and someone puts that information in the cloud? Well, it’s in the cloud already, someone would just have to take the wraps off.

Venting alert: today I am not censoring myself. I am not being polite. I am letting it all out. Because I can’t always suck it up. I am very disappointed in what the Republican party has turned into. They have become a club of extremists. They put shame on our country. In any other Western civilized society they’d be reduced to 10% of the total vote. So here come my blog post:

I know the world is waiting for me to give Paul Ryan his blessings. Before I can do so I have a couple of questions for him though.

There are these crazy women out there that actually want control over contraception and even have the option to chose abortions. Things got really out of hand over the last 70 years. Unfortunately that’s the vast majority of all females in this country. What your plan for those bitches? Guantamo Bay? A bonfire?

You are opting for the rich to pay less taxes. I don’t understand that half-hearted approach. Why not waive taxes for them entirely and actually give them a little extra money? With your concept of trickle-down economics we would all be better off if those guys would get a little break.

This is late for 2011 but still got for 2012. Commercially Halloween is the 2nd largest Holiday in the US. The average American spends $72 on Halloween. For what?

1. Lame costumes
A lot of adults want to have some Halloween fun. The problem is that their creativity did get killed between the ages of 4 to 6. They are also afraid to stick out in any way which defeats the purpose of dressing up. So they play it safe and buy a generic pre-made costume or do a 20% dress up by wearing a silly hat. Or better, they wear a football jersey and looks just as inspiring as throughout the entire year. Here are some places to look at for inspiration: The occupy guys on Wallstreet had some creative costumes. There was also a guy dressed up as an iPhone, someone that created a see-through effect by using 2 iPads or another lad dressed up as a camera (that actually worked). That’s what I am talking about. It doesn’t have to be that elaborate. you can create things on a budget. Also: if you wear a costume, don’t just stand there. Do something, connect with people, make it fun. Or just keep your sweatpants on and sit Halloween out. Personally I love theme parties. It is a great way to challenge people to be creative and have some fun. We all need to stay arts or revive our artiness if it has been in hiding due to us growing up the wrong way.

Do you ever feel some deep love arising inside yourself that empowers you to overcome almost anything? And you feel like hugging the world? And then it vanishes again? I wish I could tie this form of unselfish love to my heart and stay present with it at all times.

But it is like a butterfly that can’t be captured but must constantly be chased. It is a challenging exercise to reach that blissful state once in a while.

This butterfly has an eternal life. But like real butterflies it is extremely fragile. If I try to hold it too tight and I’d end up with dust in my fingers. That’s why it also can’t be tied down. It would simply die a very sad death.

I’ll just have to chase it and enjoy my moments with it being present.

This might be the shortest blog post I’ve ever written. I need to get back on my chase now…

The Michael Jackson funeral story is making me sad & angry. His father sold little Michael to Motown as a young boy. He beat him up. The kid was deprived of his childhood and never had a normal life. Now the the King of Pop is dead and Joe Jackson can’t resist to squeeze more money out of his son. The rumors are now for a big farewell concert at the Staples center. This is all about business. Father Jackson is promoting his new record label at a time that should be reserved for mourning the loss of his son. How about some self criticism? How about just a little bit of decency?

Are we really looking at funerals as revenue streams from now on? It is bad enough that wedding pictures are being auctioned away to the press. But a funeral is an entirely different event.

I feel like going to my bank and ask for a pre-funeral payout based on the future revenues of my passing away. The value should be based on my number of Facebook friends, Twitter followers and LinkedIn contacts.

People who are terminally ill have that option. But we might as well open that door to everyone.

A bank can then go to AIG and insure themselves against the case that my online popularity drops.

The police in our neighborhood is always on the watch for guys who don’t know their favorite hangout spot. They score every couple of minutes.

Getting a speeding ticket is humiliating. Everyone gets to see you and judge you for your shortcoming. The policeman/woman might be friendly or just might add to your misery if they have a bad day. Either way they are handing you a bitter pill. You also get the privilege to support the community with your fine.