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Olympic Trials

• Ryan Seacrest is beyond being a fifth wheel at the Olympics. He’s in the pool and out of his depth, instead of interviewing vacant rock stars he’s talking to people who train diligently with great discipline. He’s less important to the telecast than any of the thousands were to the opening ceremonies.

• When is someone going to blow the whistle on 14-year-old girls in revealing costumes with a pound of makeup being placed in sexy poses, and hyped in glam shots? If that’s not exploitation, what is?

• The male swimmers seem to have morphed into a new life form.

• Branding is everything. The Chinese divers get higher marks than anyone else for identical performances.

• I keep wondering what happened to those sheep in the opening ceremony.

• Do you think the Queen keeps her Amex Black Card in that pocketbook whenever she leaves the palace?

• Water polo has to be the toughest sport in the Olympics. No one is trying to beat the hell out of you and drown you while you’re running the Marathon or lifting weights.

• When the Olympics were begun, no one represented their city, they merely competed. Today, it’s a geopolitical confrontation.

• Did you see the American woman who’s won five consecutive gold medals in skeet shooting? Twenty years of excellence and the needed performance under pressure at just the right time. No one needs makeup or posing there.

• I love it when NBC commentators refer to each other as “great.” (Note to males who are greying: No one has natural chestnut-colored hair, so get a better dye job.)

• I watched Cox Cable’s 3-D coverage, and it was very cool.

• Watching a bike road race, except for the final mile, is like watching grass grow, but without the pleasant aroma.

• Calling someone who rode a bike fast or composed some songs “Sir” is somewhat of an affront to Nelson, Montgomery, and the rest, isn’t it?

• No one wants to talk about it, but Paul McCartney ought to stop. He was not the ending note that was needed by a long shot.

• Once the Olympic glow dims, the Today show will once again fall behind Good Morning America, and they’ll think about firing another female anchor. No one wants to admit that Matt Lauer is boring.

• After a full week, we’ll finally get to track and field, which is what the competition is really about….