Getting Deep and Meaningful - Some Thoughts on Deep Throating

Deep throating refers to taking the entire erect penis into the mouth and entrance of the throat. You don't need to be a porn star to do it, but be warned - it is a skill and it does take some practice. And make sure you deep throat a partner you’re really comfortable with - someone you trust, who is also patient, as it’s you, the giver, who sets the pace, not him…

The first thing to do is to educate your gag reflex to move out of its comfort zone. This isn’t easy - it takes time, your eyes will water and at first, you may feel like being sick. Still interested? Then start practising with your finger. Gently begin to ease just your fingertip down your throat until your gag reflex reacts. When it does, remove it, take a few deep breaths and try again. It may help to stimulate your P6 acupressure point at the same time. ‘Where’s that?’ I hear you ask. To locate it, place the first three fingers of your hand together, about two thumb widths down, on the inside of your opposite wrist - then press or massage that point whilst you try to semi-swallow a fingertip of the hand you’re massaging. (Not as complicated as it sounds - and some people find it really helps.)

When you feel ready to try the real thing, start activating your saliva flow. It’s essential to always keep your mouth moist and well lubricated. You can help matters by keeping a glass of water nearby, but the best way to get your saliva glands working overtime is to take his penis into your mouth, and swallow it as far as you feel able. When you’re convinced you’re going to be sick all over him, hold him at the entrance to your throat for half a minute, then get some air, wipe your eyes, and repeat this all again - by which time your saliva should have kicked into action. You can also use an additional lubricant to keep your mouth moist. Most lubes are fine for oral use, though obviously a flavoured lubricant is preferable.

Choose your position carefully. For optimal entry and depth, your mouth and throat should be in alignment, but make sure you control the angle of his penis, and the depth of penetration, by holding it. You may find that ‘over-the edge’ works well - this is where you lie on your back with your head hanging back over the edge of the bed, and your man stands in front of you at mouth level. If that doesn’t suit you, a conventional blow-job position, eg him sitting or standing, and you crouching or kneeling, will do fine. Experiment and go with whatever works best for you.

As you take his penis into your mouth, try sliding your tongue out and over the bottom lip - this will help flatten the back of the tongue, enabling deeper penetration. A yawning motion will also open the back of your throat. You’re bound to feel resistance at the back of your throat, but go as s-l-o-w-l-y as you need to, getting him to press down on your P6 acupressure point if you find it helps - gradually your throat should acclimatise to the feeling of being full up If you’re able to swallow around his penis, that will let him into your throat even more. And for those who don’t like the taste of semen, deep throat may be just up your street - if you time it right, his penis will bypass your taste buds…

Stop the moment it all gets too much, though - the very fact that you’ve tried is enough to command huge respect. And don’t sweat if you find that deep throat just isn’t for you. Try lubing up one of your hands instead, and just take him as far into your mouth as you can manage. As you do so, place your lubed hand firmly around the base of his penis. Whilst sucking and licking him, let your hand rise and fall in line with your mouth, and that should do the trick…

Refreshingly frank and funny, actress and presenter Julie Peasgood delivers practical information to transform your sex life. The Greatest Guide to Sex explores the world of eroticism, revealing secrets and techniques that will energise and enhance your enjoyment.