This is my yappy place. Sometimes I share my workshop experiences in jewelry-making; sometimes I talk about other things that interest me. I have created tabs along the top of my blog (next to the word home, below this msg) so you can select certain categories if you like.

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Saturday, December 27, 2014

Preparing for a Better Me

I posted something on Facebook today for people who tend to
over commit.

"Thanks, but I'll have to pass on that."

"I really appreciate your asking, but my time is
already committed."

"I wish I could, but it's just not convenient."

"I promised my kids (my husband, my wife, etc) that I
wouldn't take on any more commitments without consulting them first."

"I'd be happy to do that for you, but this month is
quite hectic. Can we talk about this project sometime in the future?"

"I don't have the time, but (name of someone else)
would probably be the better person to ask."

Sadly, I don’t recall where I got these brilliant examples
of saying “no”.I’d love to give the original
author credit.Maybe I’ll find it again
someday.

Anyway, the reason I’m mentioning it here is because I
noticed that a lot of my friends were “sharing” this status on their own
timelines.This leads me to believe
there are many of us who struggle with over-committing and/or being able to say
“no” graciously (I can’t do it graciously or non-graciously).

So let’s take a moment before the new year starts and think
about what our time is worth and about how it won’t make us bad people if we
can’t help everyone who asks.

This kind of reminds me of that quote that was falsely
attributed to Meryl Streep, but is in fact from José Micard Teixeira, a Portuguese
self-help author and life coach (and regardless who said it, I think it is
worth sharing):

“I no longer have patience for certain things, not because
I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I
do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no
patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost
the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me
and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me.

I no longer spend a single
minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore
with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate
selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular
gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites
and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In
friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with
those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement.
Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like
animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not
deserve my patience.”

How many of us know how we want to live, know what actions
we want to perform, but still fall into the traps we’ve fallen in to all our
lives?Habits are hard to break.

They say taking one thing at a time works best.And the first step is to be making it conscious.That is, btw, one reason I like making “reminder
jewelry”.These are pieces that to the
outside world look just ordinary jewelry, but the wearer knows about the secret
(and sometimes not so secret) message contained within.

There’s no shortage of “message” jewelry on Etsy, that’s for
sure.So it’s a concept people are
embracing by the thousands.

I think the idea of wearing a secret reminder gives more
strength and power to the issue you’re trying to resolve.

Let’s take one for example.You could have a simple necklace pendant with a beautiful bezel set
stone on the front and stamped on the back is one word “BE”.So as your wear this lovely piece of jewelry,
no one’s going to question you about the back of it, but throughout the day,
you fiddle with it, place your fingers on it, move it around on the chain… and each
time you touch it there’s a reminder for you.Be in the moment.

Be mindfully aware of what is going on around you.Be immersed in the situation at hand.For that moment you stop worrying about the
test you have to take tomorrow or the yelling at you got from your boss
yesterday.You’re not planning out your
grocery list or thinking about whose birthday you missed.You are in the moment.Whatever you are doing is taking your full
attention and you are feeling the emotions of only that moment.

Sometimes it helps to break a habit if you can (temporarily
or permanently) replace the habit with another action.

Say for example you’re a chronic worrier.Each time you become conscious of yourself
worrying about something, you acknowledge it and replace it with something not
harmful to you… taking a deep breath, saying a mantra or quote, bringing a
positive memory to mind, etc.If you
touch your jewelry, every time you use the replacement action, the jewelry soon
becomes a catalyst for the replacement.

It’s like performing an action while practicing deep muscle
relaxation.Soon, performing the action
can bring about the same calm state of DMR (deep muscle relaxation) because
your body associates one with the other.

So don’t be surprised if you see a few “messages” heading
out the door with Laura Bracken jewelry in 2015.

People are ready, willing, and able to change the things in
their lives that have control over.Things that will bring more positivity and peace to them on a daily
basis.

The new year seems like as good a time as any for new
beginnings.What one thing would you
like to change and what steps are you taking to change it?