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Geeks: The Functional Nerds?

I always used to call myself a “functional nerd”. I don’t know why, but I always liked the term “nerd” better than “geek”. I pretty much had them reversed in my head. Little did I know that what I really meant was that I’m a geek!

The reason I dubbed myself “functional nerd” was because I was an individual that did geeky things, but could still function in a social situation. Now I’m no social butterfly, but I enjoy going out, have drinks, dancing, ect.

What really made me come to this terminology was dating. Being a geeky girl, I did often go on dates with guys interested in the same things. Oh boy, did I come across a lot of “no-so-functional nerds”. They were awkward, didn’t seem to know how to act, and sometimes didn’t even appear to want to be there. In truth, these guys were actually nerds. Nerds are often into similar things as geeks, but not as socially adept and don’t usually step outside of their nerdy comfort zone.

So my “functional nerd” definition is actually that of a geek. The “not-so-functional” defined nerds.

I hope I haven’t lost you!

Now let’s backtrack to those guys I mentioned that I’ve dated. I thought it may be amusing and what have you to share one of those bad dates with you.

For the sake of privacy, we’ll call the guy Joe. I met Joe on a popular online dating website.

Joe was a fairly attractive guys, into a lot of the same things, and so I messaged him. Needless to say, things went well with the messaging, then texting, and lastly phone conversations. There did seem a good possibility we would get along so we set up a date.

Our meet up location was Starbucks. As luck would have it, I showed up first. (Sarcasm) I have yet to decide which is worse: Arriving first, or them arriving first and waiting on you. But I digress.

I settled in at an outside table to wait, and as soon as I saw Joe get out of his car and walk over I knew I was in for a weird date. Let me describe to you what I saw. He was wearing a dark green sweater tucked into black Dickies pants that were then tucked into tall black combat boots. This could be normal, but throw in a belt with a huge Invader Zim belt buckle on the front and it just went odd. To baffle me more, he was even wearing a floor length black trench coat over all of this. He stood out like a sore thumb on this day that was neither cold nor hot.

If the outfit wasn’t bad enough, he looked older than he was in his photos on the website. IT wasn’t flattering either. So here I was, unable to duck out of the date as it had just started. So I sucked it up and convinced myself that it really couldn’t be that bad, could it?

The date almost immediately changed locations. He suggested we go look around the mall and I agreed, but since we drove separately he offered to drive me. I agreed. (BIG MISTAKE!)

So we get to the mall, and I find out really quickly that Joe has no idea what personal space is. As soon as we walked inside, he reached over and poked me in the side! Talk about weird. I didn’t know how to react, so I just tried to laugh it off. Well, he pushed it and asked, “What, no poke back?” I jokingly said no, but he persisted again. “So you don’t do poke wars?” Seriously?! Again, I tried to laugh it off and said no. Believe it or not, it took a while for him to let it go.

From here on, things progressively got worse. Joe decided to not only direct where we were walking, the pace (fast) at which we were walking, but also the conversation. I literally could not get a word in, nor did I get to stop and look at any stores. This mall is shaped in a “U”, mind you. We entered at one end, and walked straight to the opposite because Joe was keeping such a fast pace that we had no time to stop. Did I mentioned that he occasionally decided to try the poking thing again? Yeah, awkward.

As this.. “date” went on, I was seeking comfort by texting my friends. This seemed the only way to stay sane, after all. Well, at some point Joe realized that we actually hadn’t been in any stores. So we went back and I slinked away to the other side of the store to continue texting my friends who wanted to know what was going on. Joe, however, decided that it would be a fine idea to come up behind me without my knowing and find out who I was texting! He did this a few times actually, even going as far as reading the text and asking me what was going on. I couldn’t believe he would do that! It was completely out of line.

Things continued like that until I think he finally clued in that I was ready to leave/wasn’t having a good time. He drove me back to my car, and I made my exit before he could even think about trying to kiss me!

Joe was the perfect example of a nerd. He liked a lot of the same things, but he didn’t have a clue as to how to act on a date or in general. I received no respect and no personal space. This was the reason why I came up with the thought that I want to date “functional nerds” which has evolved into: I want to date geeks, not nerds!

Hope you enjoyed my story! It was definitely an interesting date, and I learned quite a bit. FYI, girls, don’t agree to be picked up on first dates. Having your date pick you up might seem romantic and old fashion, but you may just end up stuck on an uncomfortable date with no get-away car. I learned my lesson. 😉

I’m sorry if my comment seems insensitive, but i could help but laugh as you described the bloke and the things he was doing. How could anyone be that socially awkward to the point that he does poke wars, WTF. anywho I hope you meet a geek that is at the core sociable. oh and btw nice article and very eye opening.

I really don’t know how he made it to 24-25yrs old without growing into some sort of social skills. It was ridiculous! So I don’t blame you at all for laughing. I was hoping to cause some laughter with that story. It was a view point altering experience for me actually. I’m glad you liked it! 🙂

Perhaps! — I’m happy to hear that it brightened your day. I wish I had more awkward dates to report, but only one other and it doesn’t even begin to scratch this one. I think I may write more on my personal experiences dating different types of guys vs geeky guys. Thank you for your feedback. It means a lot!