After almost 2 and a half months of being away from Zack, I’d started to feel really weird. Not too long ago I was puking all of the time. I was so sure it was from the stress that I just didn’t think much of it, but now it’s coming back on and off. Today was Friday and I just really wanted to lay down instead of going out with the guys. I called Jimmy up since he was practically my older brother. I missed him so much.

The phone rang a few times “Hello?” “Hey Jim, its Benji.” “What's going on little sister?” “Nothing really, just wanted someone to talk to. I’m feeling so down lately.” “It’s all better now hun. What's going on?” “I don’t know, I miss all of you. I’ve just been sick I guess. I don’t know. About a week or two after you guys left I started getting sick and now it’s coming back on and off. I don’t know what's wrong with me. That and this whole situation is stressful.” “I’m sorry Benji. I wish we could all be there to help you out.” “I wish you guys were here too.” I just started crying. “Babe, calm down. You know none of us are going anywhere. We love you.” “I love you all too… Jimmy be honest with me.” “Of course Benj, what's going on?” “Is Zack fucking with other girls?” “I honestly have not seen him with 1 girl since we’ve come back. He looks really fucked up about the whole thing.” “Jimmy, I think I’m pregnant. We had sex, it was my first time and we didn’t use anything. We just kind of acted on the moment. I don’t know what to do.” “Are you sure?” “I don’t know. I don’t trust drug store tests.” “Then go to the doctor Benji.” “You’re right, but what am I gonna do if I am? I can’t leave school.” “You don’t have 9 months of school left. And you know we’ll all come back out there and get you.” “The only thing my dad ever said to me that made sense was that you guys have it made, I’m broke. There's no way I could make it out there.” “Woah Benj, you know me better than that. I’ve been living in a laundromat since my parents kicked me out. But I’ll kill a bitch if that’s what it takes to help you out with this kid if you are pregnant.” “I love you Jimmy.” “I love you too. I won’t tell Zack either. I know this has to be hard on you.” “Thanks. I haven’t told anyone I’m thinking this. I don’t need anything else right now.” “Yea I get it, but you need to go to the doctors.” “You’re right. I’ll make an appointment tomorrow.” “Thank you.” “Alright it’s getting late and I’m really tired.” “Alright. Night. Love you Benji.” “Love you too Jimmy, night”

After we got off of the phone, someone knocked on my door. “Come in…” I spoke loud enough for them to hear. The door opened and Gerard came in and just stared at me. “What's going on G?” “You’re pregnant?” “Were you listening in on me?!” I sat up. “No I had to piss and I heard that through the door. Benji how do you know?” he came over and sat next to me. “I don’t for sure, but I’ve been feeling so weird lately.” We talked about that for a while.

“So it would be Zack’s kid?” Gerard asked me quietly. “He’s the only guy I’ve ever slept with.” “Oh…Well I’ll help you with it as much as I possibly can…” again he spoke quietly. “Gerard, this isn’t your problem, its mine. I got myself into this, and I’ll have to get myself out.” “Please keep it.” “I’m not going to kill it or give it up for adoption, like I said, this is my problem.” “It’ll be our project.” He smiled at me. “I’m so happy I have you Gerard. I love you, I really do.” “I love you too Benji…” He hugged me and kissed my temple. I looked up into his eyes; he was such a gentle man. I couldn’t help but smile because I know he’s one of the few people in the world I can trust with my life. “Wanna sleep down in my bed tonight?” “Yea.” I got up and followed him down to his room.