"I'd like for her to learn the consequences of inadequate hygiene." Allowing a child to feel pain when not necessary does not teach the consequences of prior actions, it teaches that going to the dentist hurts, it teaches avoidance of health professionals. Is that really the lesson you want her to learn, avoid doctors?
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BillApr 26 '11 at 17:34

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This might sound bad, but if she's 13, her dental-hygiene habits are pretty much in place already.
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corsiKaApr 28 '11 at 23:41

9 Answers
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At around the same age as your daughter, I was sent to a bad dentist who wouldn't believe me that the novacaine hadn't take effect, that I was in pain, in terrible distress, et cetera. For the next ten years I dealt with terrible dental phobia, to the point that I couldn't smile at myself in a mirror because I'd see my teeth.

Naturally, then, I'm in favor of anything that makes dental treatment more bearable. In fact, it wasn't until my teeth were literally rotting away that I found a dentist who also used laughing gas, which helped blunt the terror enough that I could sit still in the chair, and eventually helped me overcome my fears entirely.

On my last dental visit, I was chatting with my dentist, who mentioned that they see many fewer cases of dental fear these days -- kids have grown up with faster drills and better anesthesia, not to mention better dental hygiene -- so dentists are seeing fewer problems, especially of people who put off treatment because of fear, which usually makes the problem worse.

So... unless you'd rather risk your daughter developing a phobia about dental treatment that could stay with her most of her life, I'd say don't withhold a beneficent support.

My experience with dental nitrous is according to my dentists, textbook classic. For me, it actually doesn't blunt the pain that much, but makes the FEAR reaction to the pain transient. More like "OWWWWW!... huh, that was intense. I wonder what he's doing next?"

I submit you can learn just as much from that experience, with less trauma, than with a painful, horrible, possibly agonizing session.

Yes, it is cruel to subject a child to unnecessary pain because you are afraid that she might, at some later point, abuse a relatively benign and non-habit-forming substance.

First of all, anything associated with having a tooth drilled is unlikely to be considered fun and interesting. Second, if she's offered N2O at some later point (and she definitely will be), she's no less likely to try it if you make a big deal about it now than she would be if you treat it as a totally normal part of the dentists visit. After all, there's no better way to pique a teenagers curiosity than to forbid her to use it. Third, even if she does suck on a few whip cream cans as she goes through life, this doesn't mean that she is going to end up on the streets selling her body for whip-its. Fourth, if you make her go through a lot of pain that she knows she wouldn't be going through if she just had that magic N20, you're going to make it way, way more attractive to her... after all, you're exposing her to the negative consequences of not getting high on nitrous, which is probably exactly the opposite of what you want to do.

What you don't want is for her to think that N20 is a dangerous and weird substance, because you don't want her to think that the consequences of use are similar to the consequences of, say, huffing paint. You want her to realize that some things are safe when used as directed by a medical professional, and some things will turn her brain into pudding.

You should also consider the very real possibility that she or people she knows have already experimented with Nitrous (after all, it isn't hard to get), and that you turning supervised medical use into a great big deal is really just a way to convince her that you have absolutely no idea what the heck you're talking about when it comes to drugs.

It's hard to classify a procedure without laughing gas as a "consequence" of poor hygiene when obviously the choice is up to you. If you decide for it to be a consequence, it will be a parental-imposed one rather than a natural one, and your daughter will consider it as such. Not that I'm against parental-imposed consequences in and of themselves, but something like working off the copay might be a better choice.

As for the potential for abuse, kids need to learn things like that are okay in moderation under controlled circumstances. Otherwise, she is going to wonder why some authority figures think it's okay and some don't and try to figure it out on her own. I would sit her down and explain your concerns. I would talk about the training and failsafe equipment dentists have to keep her safe and contrast that with the dangers of recreational use. I would tell her you trust her to be able to tell the difference between good uses of drugs and abuse, so you're leaving the decision to her. Whatever her decision, I would reinforce the responsible, mature reasoning she used to arrive at it.

She's probably already experiencing a fair amount of pain, and opportunities like this don't come around very often (hopefully). Also, the timing couldn't be more perfect. After all, if she hasn't already, she will be forced to make decisions about recreational drugs without your guidance very soon. I think the fact that you trusted her to make a responsible decision about drugs would stick with her a lot longer than some momentary discomfort.

+1 for paying off the copay. Also, how big of a problem is laughing gas abuse, really? Are there people selling pressurized canisters in back alleys?
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JSBձոգչApr 26 '11 at 17:59

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@JSBangs, you can get tiny canisters of it for whipped cream chargers. While not physically addictive, a lot of kids who won't touch or don't know how to obtain illegal drugs have no qualms about abusing easily obtained legal substances, unless taught otherwise. It also may not be laughing gas exactly, but something with similar effects that a friend says is "just as safe."
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Karl BielefeldtApr 26 '11 at 21:24

Is it cruel to deny any anaesthetic?Yes that's very cruel and it's neither a suitable punishment nor a useful lesson.

Is it cruel to deny N2O in addition to the local anaesthetic?No that's probably not a big problem (depending on several factors) but you should still consider allowing it. N2O is not a painkiller but useful against anxiety.

Nobody benefits from a fear of going to the dentist. I'm sure the entire experience, even with painkillers, will leave a pedagogically useful impression with your daughter.

I am 39, I was never was exposed to laughing gas. I always got the novocain shot. My son (8 yo) however, had to have his tooth removed and when the doctor offered laughing gas as he was afraid of the big needle. I didn't hesitate. The procedure went fine and my son didn't feel pain.

I don't see him ASKING for laughing gas nor does he "volunteer" to go to the dentist, so it's not like this laughing gas made an instant junkie out of him. And besides, how can kids abuse laughing gas? it's not like they can buy it at Walgreens.

Educate your child about drugs, but don't make them feel guilty for asking their doctors to feel less pain. Medications have a purpose. Categorically denying them when they're needed is cruel, yes.

Abuse of laughing gas is actually not as uncommon as you might think. Sometimes tanks of laughing gas do come into the hands of people looking to exploit it as a recreational drug. Tanks of it are used to fill balloons, which are then sold for recreational use.
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BeofettApr 25 '11 at 19:05

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Really? Everytime I get one of those Balloon kits it's Helium, can't remember when I've last seen Laughing Gas since I was 8.
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MichaelFApr 26 '11 at 16:41

Nitrous isn't all that hard to obtain. creamright.com. On the other hand, it isn't all that hard to obtain because its fairly harmless. There are tons of things to worry about in this world--such as airplane glue--that are easier to get and way more harmful.
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philosodadApr 27 '11 at 12:52

The balloon kits with laughing gas are more typically seen sold at concert venues for groups of specific demographics. And while it may seem generally harmless (the effects from the balloons wears off after just a couple of minutes), it does involved depriving the brain of oxygen, and abuse can, in extreme situations, cause permanent brain or nerve damage. dartmouth.edu/~healthed/groups/dapa/otherdrugs/no.html
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BeofettMay 12 '11 at 17:00

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all drugs can be abused. However, the fact that they can be abused isn't really a good argument for not using them when appropriate.
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DA01Jul 3 '11 at 23:59

People tend to have different levels of tolerance for pain. Some handle it better, and other worse. The laughing gas is likely optional due to people's varying capabilities of pain tolerance.

If your daughter falls into the "sensitive to pain" spectrum, then yes, denying her additional pain alleviation just to "teach her a lesson" would be pretty cruel, imo.

Even if your daughter handles pain pretty well, you should still consider leaving it up to her if she wants the laughing gas. Explain to her the negative effects (poor coordination, inability to make good decisions, possibly embarrassing behavior, etc..), and let her make an educated decision.

I think being subjected to having to sit through a tooth filling procedure, with its attendant sounds (drill on bone), smells (burning bone and enamel), and discomfort (mouth propped open with a vacuum tube sucking out your saliva) is more than enough of a lesson on the consequences of inadequate hygiene.

As for not wanting to expose her a drug that is "prone to abuse", I think you may be being a bit overly sensitive here. Yes, N2O is abused by people, however, denying her a legitimate medical use of it is probably not going to send the message you intend. You are better off engaging her in active dialog about the harmful potential of abuse (most notably brain damage or death).

Is this post for real? You want to punish your own child, for mistakes you've made in bringing them up, by not allowing them pain relief?

I think to enable them to understand more about dental hygiene, would be to explore poor dental hygiene together on the Internet. Being English, and of a certain age, my teeth are poor, in general. I have fairly crooked teeth - on an English level, not too bad, but not straight at all, and not bright white. I sometimes show my kids my teeth and say to them, "Do they want teeth like this?" It normally makes them brush them. I have also been known to find gruesome images on the Internet, and make some mock horror noises, to which my kids are always drawn, and unsolicited, they'll ask what it is, and I tell them, "It's a picture of someone's teeth, who've not looked after them."

In other words, appeal to their vanity.

Removing pain relief is just simple cruelty and I cannot understand how you would want to do this to a child of yours.

I've never considered having the local anesthesia (novocaine) withheld. I have been told the NO2 can cause one to forget an experience. I've had several fillings with no NO2, I don't recall having pain, but I do remember the horrible noise of the drilling.
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Kirk KuykendallApr 28 '11 at 22:57

I have bad teeth because I was on antibiotics very often as a child. My dentist fretted about the loss of enamel back then, and he was right to worry. Speaking as someone who has a lot of dental problems despite great hygiene, I would echo what others have posted and strongly suggest you use other techniques to encourage good hygiene and discourage drug abuse. I consider having severe stomach flu marginally more enjoyable than going to the dentist, and I have a high tolerance for pain. Even with the drugs, it's not pleasant. Better to make her as comfortable as possible so she won't be afraid to go to the dentist in the future than to withhold something that will make life easier for this filling.