Click below to see my old archives dating back to August of 2007

The girl behind the blog...

Welcome to my blog! I hope you enjoy reading about my busy life with my husband of 30 years and our four sons and daughter-in-law. We are now empty nesters and my blog is helping me through the journey. I love the Lord and I love my family. I also love to decorate and go to thrift stores!

Sunday, September 6, 2015

Oh my goodness, the wedding was so much fun! Eric and I are so very happy for our son and we really love our new daughter-in-love! I know myself all too well and was afraid that I would sink into the "after a big event blues", but I was happy that I woke up feeling fine. I took my coffee and headed out to the still decorated barn and spent a little time with the Lord. I took two weeks off from work and last week was dedicated to the wedding stuff and this week was for a little R&R!

Later that morning we had a big breakfast and invited our out of town family to join us. I felt extra happy because I got a text from Rachelle stating that they made it to the airport safely and they were headed to the Bahamas! I was so touched that she texted me. :) Our company arrived and we had a lovely time. I was still doing well until....

...this happened. Mackenzie took his little rent a car and his little boy and left. He took Ridley home and then he got on a plane and went back to Colorado. I am still dealing with the fact that he has divorced his wife and he has moved to another state due to a job transfer (this is HUGE to me). My heart started quivering a bit, but I still held things together and then....

...right after Mackenzie left, Eric and I drove over to Rick and Terri's (where the wedding took place) to help them clean up. As soon as I saw the now empty venue and then ran into Terri, I just lost it and cried. We hugged. Luckily, Terri is a mom just like me and she understood and she admitted that she had a similar moment early that morning. It's not that I'm unhappy about the wedding, I am VERY HAPPY about it, it's just something deep inside and I remember when all my kids were little. I think to myself, where did all that precious time go? How did they grow up so fast and on and on...you get the picture.

I pulled myself together and composed myself. We helped clean a few things up and we brought home all of my dishes they borrowed for the wedding and I slowly cleaned them all (in the dishwasher of course!).

They gave me some of the flowers left over from the wedding and I made a nice window display with a cute picture of Grayson and Rachelle, the flowers from the wedding and my corsage and Eric's boutonniere.

They also gave me one of the centerpiece bouquets and I placed it on our farm table. Aren't they beautiful!

Then I did this.

I sat outside and just did a lot of thinking and praying. Why am I so emotional?

My husband is so different. He just goes about his work, he's not one bit sad. Sometimes I envy him. He was working in the yard and feeling really good. He actually didn't know what to do with me!

Hayden was sweet and came over and visited with me a bit. He's doing really well. He's got a great job and he's switching to OSU in a few weeks to continue his education in forestry. He's a good kid. He doesn't have a sweetheart, but he's waiting patiently on the Lord. I am going to miss him when he moves out. That could be another reason why I'm emotional.

Regardless...I did more of this.

I called my sister Kathi just about every day and she helped me so much. She is a strong Christian and prayer warrior. She's going through a trial right now too and we both encourage one another. If you don't know my sister, please click here to read her blog! Feathering My Nest. Our other sister, Kelli, is a sweet encourager and prayer warrior as well, but she was on a wonderful vacation in Hawaii. I am so thankful for both of my sisters!

The next day my friend, Shelley, came over and we went for a walk in the country.

Shelley is a good friend and she totally gets me. She understands why I cry. She let me talk and talk. She's a christian and gives me good advice. We both pray for each other.

When we got back I showed her the barn decorations. We talked more. I actually felt so much better after sharing my heart with her.

Later that morning I pampered myself in the jacuzzi tub.

Eric and I worked on the barn and got it completely cleaned out and then, you guessed it.......

.....I did more of this.

The next day I woke and had to face all of the residual mess from the party. I got everything put away and that felt really good.

Then I went outside with my coffee and did my devotional and started doing some meal planning and making some fall plans.

I enjoyed spending time with our sweet pets.

And...well...you know.

I wiped away my tears and headed to town and picked up my parents. Thankfully, my father was released from rehab and joined my mother at their new apartment at the assisted living facility. Meanwhile, their home of 52 years sold and the new owners were taking possession the next week. I knew that it was very important that both of them see that house one more time to say good-bye so I took them over there. My sisters joined me along with some of my nieces and nephews and we had a picnic lunch on the deck. This was very cathartic, but also very emotional. I am planning on writing a full post about this special time soon.

On Wednesday, my hubby and I took a little two day get away trip that I will blog about soon. It was WONDERFUL!!!

When we got back my beautiful daughter-in-love, Brittany came over with Ridley and we played in the garden and picked some produce. Then we bagged up some beans for freezing.

Eric and I had a wonderful dinner, meatloaf and corn from our garden and green beans from our garden!

But then I did this. What is wrong with me???

Sunday morning I walked around the property and asked God to help me shake this nonsense. We went to church and that helped me so much!

My husband was busy working on this fence. He totally replaced all of these boards!

He needed me to hold the post steady while he got it in place and poured gravel over it. He is very sweet and patient with me and lets me talk and cry.

We went back over to the wedding venue and picked up all of the bales of hay to take to Grayson's house. This time when I saw the property I did not cry! Progress!!!

Hayden was working on his truck with a buddy. I am trying to take this all in because in a few short weeks he will move out. I went inside and had a good lunch and watched a cute old movie.

Eric hollered at me and asked if I wanted to walk the property with him. Of course I did!

He showed me all the progress he made with tearing down the old fence preparing to build more of the new fence.

Then we ended my two week vacation with a yummy dinner of BBQ ribs, BBQ onions from our garden and fresh sliced tomatoes and cucumbers from our garden.

It was a beautiful summer evening.

The next day I had to be up early and get to work by 7:00 am!

I was worried I would be down, but I felt happy and well. I had a lot of emails to plow through, but it was really fun to see my friends and tell them about the wedding. I finally was feeling strong but then........

Ugh. Enough! Yes, I had one more crying jag, but I haven't cried since. I am so very thankful that this is behind me. Grayson and Rachelle got back from their honeymoon and we watched them open gifts. I am back to watching my sweet grandson and life is good. Life is really good.

I am embarrassed that I allowed myself to get down, especially when I have so much to be grateful for. I think this is more than my empty nest issues, I have had a very hard year. I have had a year of two really big losses; my mother-in-law, whom I was very close to, passed away, and my son divorced his wife and has moved to another state (I am very concerned about that situation). Also, my parents health issues and moving them from my childhood home. Not to mention that my son Cameron got married last August and we moved my father-in-law as well. It really has been a crazy year and I think I'm a bit of a mess.

I am being really honest here just in case there is another mom who is wacko like me and cries after big events and to let you know that you are not alone, I too have that problem and it will get better! With God's help, it does get better! Being thankful is a big help along with reading scripture and spending time in prayer. Helping others is really important too. Count your blessings!

I don't want to end my post with a crying picture, so I will end it with me smiling because I really truly am happy and I have so much to be thankful for. I am so thrilled about this new marriage and so grateful for my husband, sons, daughter-in-laws, grandson, my parents, my extended family and friends and the list goes on and on. I am grateful to God and his son! For eternal life. For God's mercy, grace and forgiveness. God is good!

"Anxiety in a man's heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad." Proverbs 12:25"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God." Psalm 43:5Hugs, Sharon

9 comments:

sharon.. your heart is full, there are transitions, hurts, joys, and longings. you are such a sweet example of being real, and always pointing us back to Christ. thank you for that, and more. hugs. sherry

You may be emotional but you are also a very strong woman. You've been through a check of a year and know our Lord is walking with you. Thank you for sharing your family, life and especially your faith.

this is normal. allow yourself to feel your life and what is going on. These are big life changing events, transitions, heart ache and joy. being emotional and crying is normal. it helps to process and to feel and to absorb and let go. I think we all on line feel so for sweet Brittany and Ridley. I pray your son comes to his senses. I wonder being the first born oldest is he sowing wild oats maybe. who knows. I can see how painful that is for all and how abrupt it is. Pray for that situation, for peace. so thankful they are still a vital part of the family. we watched them grow up, get married, buy a house and have their son so we feel the pain and sadness too. The Lord will provide for all hurts and wounds. Cut yourself some slack, these are big life change events and it is normal to be emotional. Glad your parents are doing well. I remember when we sold our family home and my grandparents home and land - i did not think I would ever stop crying and still today at times it gets me. You get through it because the presence of God is with you. you are not alone.

your posts ALWAYS, ALWAYS speak to me!!! I feel the exact same way...blessed beyond words, but grieving several losses and sad life changes and events. I think loving, nurturing people like us feel hurt and pain in a deeper way... maybe it's hormones, who knows? But I THANK YOU for always sharing your heart and for putting your life out there...it makes me see that I am not alone.

Sharon, I am crying right along with you. I totally get it. I am so much like you. I too, cry after big events. I appreciate your honesty and for sharing your life as you do. And, as your big sister, I value you so much and appreciate your daily phone calls which have encouraged me to get through my very difficult year. I love you so much. Kathi

SharonGo ahead and cry. I cryed after both my sons were married. I am very proud of them. Now this Saturday evening my Grandson is getting married. So far he is my only grandchild. (My boys were 13 years apart) I know there well be tears even though I am so proud of him and his wife. I think God made us Mom's and grandma's that way. Diana Schutte