Victims Need Just The Simple Things

Tamara Dietrich

Not the sort of stocking stuffers that most of us would expect -- or appreciate -- on Christmas morning.

Unless, that is, you've been knocked around a few times by your husband or boyfriend. Or pummeled with so much verbal abuse and ridicule, you actually start to believe you deserve it.

Unless you've fled the war zone that is your house, afraid for your life and the lives of your kids, with nothing to your name but the clothes on your backs and the bruises beneath them.

Unless your home for the holidays happens to be an emergency shelter for victims of domestic violence.

That's when a washcloth and a towel, a bottle of shampoo, a toothbrush or a second set of clothes can seem like a gift of the Magi.

This year, Transitions Family Violence Services is starting an "Adopt-a-Shelter" program to enable individuals and families, schools, civic groups and businesses to put their seasonal good will to good use.

"We want to capitalize on the spirit of the holidays," Transitions spokeswoman Julia Campbell explains.

The agency has its own Adopt-a-Family program to benefit individual clients and their kids. But this year, it hopes to bring in donations of items needed year-round at their two shelters and nine client apartments.

Items such as nonperishable foods, school supplies and small riding toys for toddlers. Silverware and dishes, pots and pans. Twin and full-size sheet sets and pillows, blankets and comforters.

They could use a large new microwave oven and artificial plants. Small gifts to reward kids for good grades and good behavior. Craft-project kits and books in good condition. Clothing for women and children.

The new program is intended to help clients not just at Christmas, Campbell says, but those who walk through the door Dec. 26 and beyond.

For a more complete picture of needed Adopt-a-Shelter items, check out the agency's Web site at www. transitionsfvs.org, or call Campbell at 728-0025.

As of Tuesday, seven families with seven or eight kids among them were living in the emergency shelter, Campbell says. No one knows who or how many will be there come Christmas Eve.

But if you want to play Santa for any of them directly or for individual client families living in agency-sponsored apartments, contact Campbell for more particulars on their annual Adopt-a-Family program.

Gifts must be unwrapped, so staff can make sure they're age-appropriate. Most important, they must be nonviolent: no guns, no knives, no war toys.

"We try to have a complete culture of nonviolence," Campbell says. "They've got enough violence in their house."

Every year, she says, a local chapter of Commercial Real Estate Women -- a nationwide industry group -- decorates the shelter for the holidays and throws clients a Christmas party. Agency staffers rotate in throughout Christmas day, and the hot line is always staffed by a volunteer, just in case.

Last year, 4,213 people called for help, information or advice. And about 337 women and children were given a room at the inn -- or, in this case, a bed at the shelter.

Since 1980, Transitions figures, it has offered 140,000 nights of shelter to more than 14,000 victims of abuse.

Maybe they've made a small dent in statistics like these:

Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to American women ages 15 to 44 -- more than car accidents, muggings and rapes combined.

Each year in the U.S., 4,500 women are killed by abusive husbands or boyfriends.

Domestic violence hot lines in Virginia this year logged about 21,000 calls from victims.

An act of domestic violence occurs every 12 seconds.

Maybe we can't beat numbers like these with batteries, bed linens and potted plants. But until peace on Earth arrives for good, we can spread a little good will toward women and children who need it most.

DAILY PRESS HOLIDAY FUND

Transitions Family Violence Services is one of many local charities that benefit each year from the Daily Press Holiday Fund.

The campaign kicked off Nov. 5 and aims to raise $150,000 through Jan. 31. The McCormick Tribune Foundation will add 50 cents to every dollar raised.

Last year, 1,400 people donated nearly $152,000. With contributions from the foundation, more than $229,000 was distributed to needy children and families.

If you'd like to donate, mail contributions to the Daily Press Holiday Fund, P.O. Box 746 -- MP 1105, Newport News, VA 23607. Or drop them off at the Daily Press main office at 7505 Warwick Blvd. in Newport News.