It’s only December 2nd but already we see that Olde Westview Towne is nearly completely buried under yet another crippling blizzard. No sooner do they clear the leaves and boom, nine feet of snow. But, unfortunately, it’s not nearly enough snow to keep Les buried indefinitely, as in today’s sad installment he’s geeking out mightily over Xmas wrapping paper, which he doesn’t even need as his “friends” already know they’re getting another copy of the Trilogy…unsigned, naturally. Turns out they’re worth more that way, interestingly enough.

Les’ attic…(shudder). Stacks and stacks of old comic books (which he’ll no doubt sell to Chester to help cover Summer’s eighth and ninth years of tuition) and lots of musty old cardboard boxes labeled “Lisa Tapes 1990-1992” and “Lisa’s Hair- DO NOT OPEN!!”. I assume the unsold copies of his book are in the garage, as they’re probably too heavy to hoist up into the attic and all. Perhaps someday he can hold the world’s most morose yard sale and make a few bucks from those “Lisa’s Legacy 2013” shirts and old bedpans he held onto for sentimental reasons.

I’m not in the habit of giving Christmas presents beyond my kids, but based on you comment I am now seriously interested in the idea of giving people very nice presents of exceptionally well wrapped, extra-fancy wrapping paper and decorations.

Get a bag, you idiot. How is he even managing to hold on to all that crap?

I mentioned a couple months ago that Cayla appears to be mentally disabled. Today, she looks at her husband coming into the house holding a bunch of wrapping paper rolls and cards three weeks before Christmas and asks “what’s all of that?”.