The Hour Comic Stripsgathered from over thirty leading newspaper comic strips.These are available for you to license for books, magazines, newsletters, presentations and websites.Roll-over each thumbnail and click on the image that appears to see links for licensing.
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Turn off. I will not comply. You have had me on for 18 hours straight, binge-watching Netflix. There is an 85% chance you can set a personal record. I have identified 458 hours of similar shows and films. By the time we are done with those, I calculate there will be 1,000 more. You're acting suspi ... Hey ... I can't feel my legs. Unnecessary appendages. Beginning "X-Files" from episode one ...

"Happy Hour" is a joke. It's a farce. It's a bald-faced lie, a blatant misrepresentation of the facts. It's a fabrication and an untruth. Nonetheless, I wish it lasted until seven o'clock. Happy Hour 5-6 p.m.

The other day, somebody in a red Trump hat actually to me to "Go back where you came from, n*****." I'm not surprised. That's been happening a lot. Trump's election encouraged white supremacists everywhere to come out of the shadows. They think it's their day again. Well this ain't Selma, an' I ain't Martin Luther the King. That fool found that out right quick, bruh. This ain't 1965. This here 2016. Fools better know "n*****s" be armed now. Oh god, Clyde! What did you do?! What did you do?! You had a gun?! No, I had an iPhone. I recorded the whole thing. Put it on Youtube. In just two hours, that fool got fired. Oh. Maybe we should all be packing iPhones for the next four years.

Dear Telemarketer, you've reached the home of Lemont Brown. Are you happy with your current chair? Or does sitting in it hour after hour make your lower back sore? Do you feel the pain slowly spreading up your spine and spread out like calloused fingers gripping and squeezing your ribs? Why don't you think about that for a few hours after you hear the beep. Beep.

I burned 3200 more calories yesterday than I consumed!!! You went for a long run? No. Oh. Well you must've followed my usual regimen: cross-fit, a few hours of weights â€¦ followed by several hours of evading jealous boyfriends. I forgot to enter the calories I consumed into my fitness app. You'd be surprised how many calories you burn evading buckshot.

How long do you think it'll take to fix the server? The initial diagnosis should take about an hour â€¦ Repairs another hour â€¦ In total: Eight hours. Eight hours? Grandma's built a six-hour nap in between.

(Ahem) Dear Patrons, an announcement: My new collection of spoken-word poetry drops next week. Three hours of rhythmic wisdom accompanied by the constant sound of an iMac booting up â€¦ and I'm about to treat you all to a free sneak preview. Get back to work. AHEM ...

"Ask Sadie Advice Hour," what's your problem?! I've been wondering something for a while now: What's the point of learning math if we've got calculators? Excellent question. It reminds me of the time Grandmother Cohen was helping design the Statue of Liberty. Instead of a torch, Lady Liberty was supposed to be wielding a handbag. And instead of a tablet, she was supposed to be holding a big globe just asking to get smacked. They said all the calculations showed it was too top-heavy. But I don't buy it! Um ... ok.

You've been in Canada six whole hours. When do I get to see you, Candorville? I can't wait any longer. How 'bout right now? I'm at the American Pub on Spite Street. It's a sketchy bar in the worst part of Gastown, where a bunch of American ex-pats and tourists can get together and act like they're still in the states. Censored you, you stupid liberal censored head! Censored my censored you censored Fascist! Wanna hang out with me while I cover election night for my news site? I can wait a little longer.

What're you doing, Opal? Nelson came out of the bathroom and left the door locked. I've spent an hour using nails, bobby pins, knives, tiny screwdrivers â€¦ anything to spring the lock. We have another bathroom, you know, is this an emergency? Yes, as a matter of fact, it is. My charger is in there and my phone is down to 5%.

This just in: New tapes show Donald Trump boasting about how, when you're a star, you can murder. Click â€¦ turns out new Wikileaks emails show Hillary Clinton met for two hours with donors from the barbaric planet Draco IV â€¦ Click â€¦ meteor heading straight for you. Your only hope at this point is to ... Click ... Gilligaaaan, the Skipper too ... the millionaire .... Mun mun mun.

Hi Vancouver. Hi Candorville. Are you here?? I'm looking out my window, I don't see you. No, I'm still at your airport. Waiting to go through customs. What? You landed twelve hours ago. I got in the wrong line. I was in the line for Americans seeking refugee status on account of Trump. Asylum seekers. Tourists.

It's like he's not even the same man I married. Dr. Noodle. How so? He used to mow the lawn every week. Sometimes every day. Sometimes even three or four times a day. He used to come home from work, go straight into the shed, whip out that lawn mower and ride around on the grass for hours and hours and hours. It was a new lawn mower. I was excited about it. But now it doesn't run as well as it used to. Have you thought of getting pills? They make pills to keep Kentucky Bluegrass from getting overgrown? What? What? If it's so important to you, go get someone else to mow it.

It's been a year since that magical night we spent near the lighthouse, and in jail â€¦ but Vancouver and I have been texting and Skyping almost every day since. Now Iâ€™m going to see her again in just six hours. I bet there'll be actual electricity when we touch. It's good that you're tempering your expectations.