Wash hands, be smart, support local businesses

It’s a mad, mad world, y’all. I’ve always wondered how mass hysteria would start, like in the case of a zombie apocalypse or “The Handmaid’s Tale” premise. And now we know.

I’ve never made a meme before, or whatever they’re called, and frankly I’m getting tired of them. But I learned a long time ago from Punky Brewster that if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.

Anyway, most of you might be content to isolate yourselves and binge on Netflix and toilet paper. But some of us are social creatures, and we refuse to let fear win. Yes, we will take every precaution necessary and wash our hands 80 times a day and bathe ourselves in Purell like it’s Dundee Dip.

Truth is, our local businesses need us right now. And it just so happens that I need a drink. So Saturday afternoon, despite the St. Patrick’s Parade being postponed, I will still patronize the bars and restaurants on Baxter Avenue and Bardstown Road because I believe it’s my civic duty as The Bar Belle to do so. I even thought of a name: Corona Crawl 2020.

I extend the invitation to anyone who wants to join. And I also will not judge you if you don’t, as long as you don’t judge me if I do. We all operate under free will, and if my will is craving green beer (I mean Guinness), then so be it.