You all know the stereotype of the dumb teenage girl? Go ahead, imagine one. Fill out all of the stereotypes in your head. Got it? Okay, you have now fully imagined my cousin. Just as a kind of teaser for the kind of weepingly stupid shit she does, I'll tell a short story within this short story. She lives in North Carolina with her family, but it wasn't always that way. When she had only barely turned 15 years old, her best friend gets caught with some weed at school. Not much, but it doesn't take a whole lot to get you in big trouble when you're a sophomore in high school. The school decides to start investigating this girl's close friends to see if anybody else has any or knows anything. What's my cousin do? Drops out and moves to Illinois. She ran away from her family and came to live with her grandmother (my great aunt). She comes from a very uptight, conservative Christian household, but running six fucking states away over weed seems like the mother of all overreactions.

So that's the kind of flighty, short sighted teenage girl she is. Before that debacle, she was dating this dude. I'd see them going back and forth constantly about how perfect the other one was and how they loved each other sooooo much with their ungodly saccharine pet names. When the relationship started, I had made a bet with myself that it wouldn't last more than three months, and I lost my own bet by only a month. Four months, and the star crossed lovers hated each other for what was surely a petty, childish reason considering the two parties were petty children. I laughed to myself, because I suppose the pangs of schadenfreude from witnessing the most obvious and cliche adolescence play out in front of me tickles me in special places. Then the whole weed thing happened. She wound up moving back after a few months, but stayed out of school. She dates the idiot kid again, it lasts a few weeks, again I laugh to myself. The next day, she's dating a new guy, one she'd literally just met. They start up with the whole overly sugary I WUV U SOOOO MUCH crap again, and I make another meaningless bet with myself because I'm a jerk. This was three weeks ago. I couldn't imagine how this girl's life could possibly get any stupider and more stereotypical of the whole idiot girl archetype who is convinced she's a hopeless romantic when really she just has as much foresight as a stone wall.

And then she outdid herself.

My cousin, at the wise, world weary, and well adjusted age of 16 years old, just got engaged to her boyfriend of ~3 weeks.

It's legit too, like with a stupidly expensive ring and everything. I'm blown away at the fact that I share trace amounts of blood with this scholar. She has to be pregnant or something, that... that has to be what's going on. This whole thing is its own brand of monumentally stupid, I'm in awe of the spectacle. And for added comedy, this is his profile picture on Facebook.

My cousin, at the wise, world weary, and well adjusted age of 16 years old, just got engaged to her boyfriend of ~3 weeks.

Ah, the wonderful feeling of invincible independence. I remember that, as I found Arch Enemy's "Dark Insanity" to be the heaviest song ever (I still like the album). Reminds me of the time when I was 19 and I got with a girl in Seattle and after the lovely hotel evening, she said she wanted to be with me forever. She took a shower while I booked it up Broadway heading north on foot, but I felt like such a piece of shit just abandoning her (she got the room) and we both had no ride. That, and I was out of breath by the 4th block so I just turned around and faked getting some burgers.

I just realized that I went REALLY local with this one, so only iAm will probably know my general location when all this went down.

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gomorro wrote:

Yesterday was the birthday of school pal and I met the chick of my sigh (I've talked about here before, the she-wolf I use to be inlove with)... Maaan she was using a mini-skirt too damn insane... Dude you could saw her entire soul every time she sit...

People like that also make me happy that I've still got no interest in pursuing relationships with another person on that level. I'm all for casual shit, but I've got no time or interest to deal with that.

I bet she'll be on Maury in 3 months time. The jury is still out on whether it'll be the paternity test or "I'M A GROWN ASS WOMAN!". Maybe both.

She ran away from her family and came to live with her grandmother (my great aunt). She comes from a very uptight, conservative Christian household, but running six fucking states away over weed seems like the mother of all overreactions.

The situation isn't just about weed, it's about being uncomfortable with family and feeling like moving six states away is better than being judged and reprimanded by family. Look at how you judged her for everything she has done - is her conservative Christian family going to do the same and tell her about it? How would you feel if your only means of support, both financially and emotionally, even the most basic means of having a place to live and feel comfortable, was hostile towards you? Her answer was to leave there. Lack of emotional support from those who you need it from leads to going somewhere to find comfort - the distance traveled might indicate something here. Have you talked to her through all this? I know teenagers are annoying, especially on Facebook, but knowing that there is someone, especially family, who knows what's going on in your life and listens to you can help a lot. It's not necessarily a huge involvement either, but it can really help if she knows there's another person in her family who has an interest in her wellbeing can help guide her - you're also closer to your age than her grandmother, and maybe she really doesn't have anyone who she's comfortable asking about or telling what she's doing.

As a teen I think I was pretty much the opposite of that, but not in a good way. Fuck though, teenagers have it hard. Adolescence is like childhood and adulthood having a nasty hormonal car crash. And somehow you are supposed to be a functioning adult at the end of it, in a society devoid of values and obsessed with bullshit. Fuck.

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Metantoine wrote:

If Summoning is the sugar of fantasy metal, is Manowar the bacon?

CorpseFister wrote:

Personally, I prefer to know nothing of the esoteric hierarchy of MA and the profane rituals required to attain rank.

Last edited by inhumanist on Mon Dec 10, 2012 4:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

She ran away from her family and came to live with her grandmother (my great aunt). She comes from a very uptight, conservative Christian household, but running six fucking states away over weed seems like the mother of all overreactions.

The situation isn't just about weed, it's about being uncomfortable with family and feeling like moving six states away is better than being judged and reprimanded by family. Look at how you judged her for everything she has done - is her conservative Christian family going to do the same and tell her about it? How would you feel if your only means of support, both financially and emotionally, even the most basic means of having a place to live and feel comfortable, was hostile towards you? Her answer was to leave there. Lack of emotional support from those who you need it from leads to going somewhere to find comfort - the distance traveled might indicate something here. Have you talked to her through all this? I know teenagers are annoying, especially on Facebook, but knowing that there is someone, especially family, who knows what's going on in your life and listens to you can help a lot. It's not necessarily a huge involvement either, but it can really help if she knows there's another person in her family who has an interest in her wellbeing can help guide her - you're also closer to your age than her grandmother, and maybe she really doesn't have anyone who she's comfortable asking about or telling what she's doing.

It's amazing how you know exactly how she was feeling based off those two sentences. Really, you should be a detective or work for the government or something.

Make another bet, but get other people in on it. I'm actually hoping she gets married just to really drive in the kind of mistake she's making.

This.

Honestly, this is the kind of stupidity that is its own punishment; whether she actually gets married, the whole thing ends in what she takes to be a tragedy (and others see as a farce) that drives her into the arms of the next six-packed dimwit, or the unwise pair spawn (as this kind of idiocy so often goes hand in hand with the seeming inability to follow relatively simple instructions for contraception), the misery that likely faces them is almost enough to make you feel sorry for them. Emphasis on the almost, especially as they'll likely drag many others into their unhappiness. Ergh.

By the way, having joined the cyber hordes on Facebook recently, I saw that Antoine posted about Myridian on the MA site; I was at their album launch on Friday, pretty good gig - it's really strange to see a relatively obscure act from one's town praised on a global page like that; kinda cool.

Must be a European thing. Uni finished in late November and most of the time I've been holed up at home doing nothing but streaming TV shows on my computer and in return I've done quite successfully in avoiding all the Christmas advertising that's slapped all over the outside world. Even the rare times I do go out I've avoided Christmas stuff. Only mention of Christmas I've heard over the past week and a bit is my family asking about what to get and whatnot.

I've been so reclusive over the past two weeks I can't tell whether it's good I've avoided the Christmas ads or bad that I'm at home and will be for the next few months.

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Zodijackyl wrote:

Civil has very strong and poorly substantiated opinions about anyone wielding jugs.

Whereas I actually have a life, and have to go to work and university, and see the people I live with every day. It's just eveywhere.

http://headphonecommute.bandcamp.com/ Downloading this. First time I've ever actually paid for mp3. 86 ambient tracks for a tenner, a lot of them by really good artists. Hopefully there's enough there to get me through the 2 assignments I want to smash out by Wednesday.

Also, profile pics like that make me thankful that I'm a kinda fat, hairy sumbitch. It seems like the six pack can make any guy an instant douche.

Not true. Most of us gym dwellers are very hard working and dedicated, and we'd rather close our facebook accounts than upload sissy pictures like that. In any case, this guy's abs are nothing to write home about at all, especially considering he had to angle his camera for his 'perfect shot'.

That story was pretty worthy of a facepalm or two. The worst part is that if a girl hasn't matured by her late teens, she never will.

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LegendMaker on pointless genre dissection wrote:

Will you in turn help me classify the shemale/ladyboy, tranny/ladyboy, ladyboy-shemale/tranny, and tranny-ladyboy/shemale sub-folders of my shemale/ladyboy/tranny collection?