Stellenbosh

The general eard the firin on the flank,
An e sent a mounted man to bring im back
The silly, pushin persons name an rank
Ood dared to answer Brother Boers attack:
For there might ave been a serious engagement,
An e might ave wasted alf a dozen men;
So e ordered im to stop is operations round the kopjes,
An e told im off before the Staff at ten!
And it all goes into the laundry,
But it never comes out in the wash,
Ow were sugared about by the old men
(Eavy sterned amateur old men!)
That amper an inder an scold men
For fear o Stellenbosh!*
The General ad produced a great effect,
The General ad the country cleared, almost;
The General ad no reason to expect,
And the Boers ad us bloomin well on toast!
For we might ave crossed the drift before the twilight,
Instead o sitting down an takin root;
But we was not allowed, so the Boojers scooped the crowd,
To the last survivin bandolier an boot.
The General saw the farmouse in is rear,
With its stoep so nicely shaded from the sun;
Sez e, Ill pitch my tabernacle ere,
An e kept us muckin round till e ad done.
For e might ave caught the confluent pneumonia
From sleepin in his gaiters in the dew;
So e took a book an dozed while the other columns closed
And De Wets commando out an trickled through!
The General saw the mountain-range ahead,
With their elios showin saucy on the eight,
So e eld us to the level ground instead,
An telegraphed the Boojers would nt fight.
For e might ave gone an sprayed em with a pompom,
Or e might ave slung a squadron out to see,
Bute was nt takin chances in them igh an ostile kranzes,
He was markin time to earn a K.C.B
The General got is decorations thick
(The men that backed is lies could not complain),
The Staff ad D.S.O.s till we was sick,
An the soldier, ad the work to do again!
For e might ave known the District was an otbed,
Instead of andin over, upside-down,
To a man oo ad to fight alf a year to put it right,
While the General went an slandered im in town!
An it all went into the laundry,
But it never came out in the wash.
We were sugared about by the old men
(Panicky, perishin old men)
That amper an inder an scold men
For fear o Stellenbosh!

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