I thought overall this movie was pretty enjoyable. I don't really like Ryan Gosling's whole shtick, and his character felt very one note, but somehow I wound up empathizing with him by the end anyway, to the point where the ending actually made me sad. Also though I was annoyed because I felt like Emma Stone's character behaved atypically in a big way in the end, and also the whole way it went could have been completely avoided if they had not just been such typically stupid emotionally stunted characters who can't communicate properly at all. There's a scene where Ryan Gosling's character comes home from being on tour just for Emma Stone's character's birthday and surprises her with making her dinner and baking her a cake, but she's all like "When are you going to stop touring?" and he's like "ISN'T THIS WHAT YOU WANTED?!?!?! I'M DOING THIS FOR YOU!!!" Um, wtf? So dumb. Anyway, when people are not talking, it's way more fun, easy to just back and admire the beautiful costumes, sets, lighting, and photography. B+

"La La Land" is a compelling thesis on why California should drift off into the sea. I seriously can't remember the last time I was that angry and disappointed from a movie.

You go in expecting a "musical" and get a mediocre, overly-long emotional snuff film with a few moments of Ryan Gosling trying to sing.

The opening scene was great. Then it quickly devolved into two white people moping about being dipshits trying to make it in LA. The characters aren't relate-able, their actions don't make any sense, their motives shallow. It finishes on an anti-romantic, nihilistic message. So. Brave. I'm surprised Kevin Spacey didn't show up just to die, because that makes movies deep, right?

It's a childish, morose fantasy about "how life be when ya make it big".

City of Stars was a catchy song, but not enough to redeem the two hours of my time. The rest of the music was forgettable and forced.

F- send them all to Guantanamo

If I had a dollar for every one of my songs j$ has called a 90s pastiche, I'd have $1 for every song I've written.

I'm guessing that's like 90-100% trolling? I'm trying hard to translate that into a coherent criticism of the movie but not having much luck. "why California should drift off into the sea"??? You probably mean Hollywood and the entertainment industry, which is kind of like saying the entire Eastern sea board should be sunk because of DC, which you probably actually would say from your fortress of solitude in flyover country. >:P Honestly I would take 100 "La La Land"s over a single "Transformers" movie. That's the Hollywood I wish would sink into the ocean.

I forgot one thing that really bugged me about the movie, which was how Ryan Gosling's white character took it upon himself to be the savior of "real jazz", while all the other jazz musician characters were black. They completely glossed over the racial and cultural appropriation issues there.

Now that I'm thinking about his character more, they gave him little to no backstory or motivation of substance. I felt like Emma Stone's character's backstory and motivation for wanting to be an actress had something to it. It wasn't an innovative or original story but it made her passion for acting more believable for me than his passion for "real jazz". He just sounded like a complete douche nozzle when he talked about it most of the time.

The characters aren't relate-able, their actions don't make any sense, their motives shallow.

I always wonder about this, I think this is painfully common in many movies. I don't know if it's because the writers are shallow people whose actions don't make sense, or because they think the audience are shallow people whose actions don't make sense, who would be alienated by characters that weren't like that, or both, what. A lot is probably just writer ineptitude/laziness that leads them to have characters make utterly stupid decisions purely for conveniently moving the plot along, for lack of better ideas, etc. The big argument they have is a perfect example of that.

The only thing I'm trolling about is California. Some people have convinced me California is okay sometimes.

If the measure of "good art" is how many feelings it evokes, then La La Land wins because it makes me want to burn everything to the ground. Every time I felt slightly invested in the story, it let me down in a new way - not in a creative way, but in a Hollywood fellating itself way. "It would be interesting to make the character do this" instead of "this character would do this".

The cultural appropriation wasn't itself a problem. The fact that an OCD nerd took part in it was the problem. "Oh I gotta make my jazz club at all costs" yeah okay bro. How about you clean your apartment? How about you get a real job? How about you live somewhere affordable? How about you actually make an effort if you're going to mourn your relationship like a chump? "But mah jazz club." The struggle of jazz was not being a privileged, yet completely incompetent, white man ruining his own life. That is what's offensive about it.

I do suppose I felt the same disappointment toward Transformers. Hollow, squandered opportunity, bland but shiny, disinteresting, trying in all the wrong ways. Except Transformers wasn't a cultural assault on the nature of life and love. And Transformers didn't promise me songs.

If I had a dollar for every one of my songs j$ has called a 90s pastiche, I'd have $1 for every song I've written.