We’ve all heard the wedding etiquette rules about who pays, who attends, who sits where, and how soon the thank you cardsshould be written. But what about the use of Facebook and Twitter at a wedding? Today many engaged couples setup wedding websites to announce and share every detail, check registries and attendance lists online, and post regular Facebook updates and tweets about their special day ahead. Read on for some etiquette rules for today’s tech-savvy couple.

Dana Hanna tweets at the altar

Facebook over-sharing

Anna Post, great-great-granddaughter of Emily Post and spokesperson for the Emily Post Institute cautions “Most of us have more friends on Facebook than we can invite to our wedding, so you need to be a little careful. In the lead-up to the wedding, always ask yourself before you post if it’s information the masses really need to be in on. (Totally fine: “Just found my dream dress … love at first sight!” Over the line: “To everyone attending the wedding of the decade (ours!), rooms at the inn are booking up fast …”)

Picture posting

Posting candid wedding photos can be a great way for guests to fondly remember a wedding, but many brides are wary of being tagged in an unflattering shot on their special day. If you’d rather not have your wedding candids posted on Facebook, send a quick email to guests after the wedding thanking them for their attendance and requesting that they post any photos on an alternate site. Another option would be to add customized text to each place cardproviding login info for a private photo-sharing page and a polite request not to post photos of the married couple on Facebook.

Using online RSVPs

Some couples are choosing to use their wedding website to track guest responses, but if you’re asking your guests to RSVP online, be sure to include a phone number on your wedding invitation for your less tech-savvy invitees. Many older guests may not be comfortable using email or responding online, so be sure to offer a traditional feedback method too.

Tweeting your nuptials

If you or your spouse-to-be have been broadcasting your engagement journey on Twitter, you’ll likely want to broadcast tweets from your wedding itself. But it’s advisable to designate a close friend to tweet on your behalf so you can focus on your ceremony, reception duties and spending time with your guests. Designate someone who is not in the wedding party and be sure that no broadcasting happens during the wedding ceremony itself.

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