Monday, July 23, 2012

If you're on the couch and you accidentally put your hand under a cushion and then you accidentally pull out a piece of foam and then accidentally shove it really far up your nose, then you need to tell your mom. She's going to make you go in the bathroom while she puts pepper under your nose to make you sneeze and then the foam doesn't come out. Then your mom is going to try to get it out with one of those squeezey ball air-sucker things that are for baby snots and then the foam still won't come out. Your nose starts to feel bad now. Your mom is going to drive you to see Dr. Bess and in the car your mom is going to talk about all of the places on your body that you shouldn't shove things in.

Dr. Bess is going to look up your nose with a light and then she is going to try to get the thing with a thing but the foam isn't going to come out. Then Dr. Bess is going to talk about all of the places on your body that you shouldn't shove things up. Dr. Bess is going to call another doctor on the phone and then you have to go back in the car and drive to a special kid's nose doctor at a hospital that's just for kids and babies.

The special kid's nose doctor has a bunch of nurse people in the room and puts a thing in your nose-nostril to open it and then uses a little grabber and then he pulls the foam out - bam, easy-peasy. Your nose will feel all normal now. Dr. Nose Doctor gives you a Batman sticker and tells you not to shove anything in your nose or ears and that you seem like a nice guy but he hopes he doesn't see you back in his office again. Your mom will say that Dr. Nose Doctor looks like an acting guy named Jeff Daniels. You won't know who that is but you like the Batman sticker.

You will stop at a restaurant on the way home to have pie and your mom will drink a lot of coffee and call your dad and both your grandmas to tell them that the foam is out of your nose and you will eat the pie. The pie will be good.

When my son was younger, he shoved a pebble up his nose while at preschool. When the teacher called to tell me what had happened, she said, "I tried to get it out, but couldn't. I even took him to Miss Maria (another teacher), but she couldn't get it out either and she is our expert at getting things out of noses and ears."While "expert at getting things out of noses and ears" may not be seen as a marketable skill in all fields, I think at I preschool, that is like saying you have a PhD.

My grandson filled his ears with pea gravel. Ears, plural. He got a ride from the playground in an ambulance; got an overnight stay in a hospital bed because the doctor with the ear vacuum came in the morning. He probably got chicken nuggets on the way home. He was four. Just like him, I'll bet Bob doesn't shove stuff again, either.

My daughter was 3 when she shoved an earring up her nose. I was very surprised when they had a form for foreign object in nose/ear at the urgent care. She managed to sneeze the cute little mushroom shaped earring out while we were waiting in the room for the doctor to come in. The only time we have managed to get out of there without being charged.

Hahah. Excellent tutorial on things-stuck-up-nose removal. I will be sure to keep this in mind next time I or someone I know accidentally gets something stuff up his/her nose. Just discovered your blog on Finding the Funny, and you have FOUND the funny, lady. No? Not funny? Yeah, you're right. Someone definitely has made that joke before.

Oh God. I just went through this with my two year old who decided to stick purple square stickers up each nostril. I was afraid I was going to have to take her to the doctor. Thankfully my husband was able to teach her "snot rockets" to get it out. She walked around all afternoon saying "snot wocket". I'm glad I didn't have to deal with an afternoon of a thing getting out a thing. But, pie does fix most! Glad to have found you!Tracy @ http://www.momaical.com

Just found you through the LYTM link up. My children have yet to put anything up anything but they are SO those kids and just haven't hit the age yet. Maybe if I read this to them it will prevent the inevitable???

Love the point of view of the blog. My daughter once came down and said that she was worried she had an M&M up her nose. The conversation was weird. Did you put an M&M up your nose? No. Do you have any M&M's? No. Why do you think you've got an M&M up your nose? I don't know. I was just worried. No M&M up her nose. Go figure, kids. Enjoy your SITS day.

Been there with a 3-year-old and the crane hook off a Hot Wheel. 'cept we got to wait for it to come out in poop cause nobody at the ER could get it out and then he snuffled it up and into his system. Good times, good times.

Oh, how I wish I couldn't identify with this. I once had to take my 2 yr old to get a piece of candy removed from his nose. It's in their DNA, I think, to be compelled to shove things where they don't belong.

Yep, I knew this one would be funny. Why do we ask why about children shoving things up their noses?? It is a mystery that will remain unsolved! Thanks for the laughs.....the woman at walmart in front of me yesterday could have used this story. She was trying to shove a ball point pen in her daughters' nose to retrieve something....yick. :) Happy Sits day!

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