South African girls bring attention to violence against women for the One Billion Rising campaign. Photograph: LynethCrighton/GuardianWitness

A debate has ignited among the Guardian’s Africa network partners. In a guest blog for Ms Afropolitan Doreen Akiyo Yomoah wrote that "you are a woman" was her least favourite word combination in the English language, proceeding to outline the five most irksome assumptions made on the basis of her gender.

This provoked a response from Freda Muyambo, also known as Freedes, who said some of Yomoah’s points reflected more on her as an individual rather than a female. She argues that women are different both biologically and socially – a fact to be celebrated, not dismissed.

Muyambo says her blog was intended as a springboard for debate. This got us thinking and we decided to open up the discussion to commentators on our network and beyond. So, what does it mean to be a feminist in Africa today? What are the main challenges activists are up against? What does the future hold?

"You are a woman"; quite possibly my least favourite words strung together. When people say this to me it’s usually to judge how badly I’m performing my gender. No assumptions should be made about anyone based on those three words. Nevertheless, here are some that I hear regularly.

I have to present myself a certain way. In Ghana (where I’m from originally) everything is stratified by gender, people would say I must wear earrings because I’m a woman.

I can’t do DIY. Once, when I was renting a room from a Ghanaian family, I brought a bookshelf into the house. My landlord’s sister saw me and asked incredulously if I was going to put it together myself. While I was putting it together with my weak female hands, the landlord barged in, grabbed a plank of wood from me, and said "a woman shouldn’t be doing this kind of work". When I objected, he said that he was helping me.

Freda Muyambo, aka Freedes: 'freedom to access all opportunities available to men'

Freda Muyambo, also known as Freedes

The short definition of it would be a woman’s right and freedom of choice to access all opportunities available to men. Africa is largely a patriarchal society, and this has had a negative impact.

Simple things such as being able to aspire to any career of her choice, the right to own land and access to finance are all areas which require breaking down barriers. In my case, I chose to pursue a career which is traditionally male dominated anywhere you go in the world; electrical engineering.

I remember when I was training as an engineering student, I was in the midst of pulling apart a two cylinder engine when my trainer, a gentle elderly man in Botswana, gave me a look. He declared that I did not really belong in engineering, in his eyes I belonged in the kitchen.

Inequality of the sexes is of high proportions in African societies. Not only because of issues such as female genital mutilation (FGM), sexual abuse, violence against women or unequal access to land or education. But also because women are systemically disempowered in their private lives, where men are the head of the family.

In the cultural realm of art, literature and entertainment male gatekeepers habitually dismiss women's contributions, the same goes for laws and traditional customs such as polygamy. Despite this depressing reality the idea that it is un-African to be feminist flourishes.

Thankfully, a large number of women are unperturbed by such ideas. We are proud and happy to be African and feminist. Why? Because it is part our history, to fight the power, be it male or white supremacy, and to rise. To be an African feminist today is to be part of an influential, vibrant, exciting force.

Fungai Machirori, Her Zimbabwe: 'feminism means finding the right language'

Fungai Machirori

In Zimbabwe, feminism still has negative connotations. The mainstream women’s movement largely prefer to be referred to as gender activists. The movement is heavily influenced by NGOs and conforms to a standard where terms like "girl child" and "gender mainstreaming" gain purchase and attract funding. Feminism is still seen as elitist in a country where the majority of the population is rural and has "grassroots" issues to deal with.

To articulate a feminist identity connotes rebellion and radicalism, feminism is still largely something that other people do. I studied it as part of my first degree (in Zimbabwe) and it was presented as theory, something to be learned, not lived. Something to be expressed and articulated by white western women. Zimbabwean or African feminism never crossed my mind.

With growing access as a result of social media and other such tools, younger Zimbabwean women are more confident to claim feminist ideology. But the derision – as either sexless or over-sexed, unmarriageable, westernised or confrontational women – remains hard terrain to navigate, especially since their value is still determined by marriage and motherhood.

In effect, feminism – to me, in Zimbabwe – means finding the right language. You have to do more listening before you start talking, to get your message and purpose across.

March 8th, in honour of International Women’s Day, I looked at my own family and realised that I am who I am because of my great grandmother; Rosebella. This matriarch is the reason I come from a long line of educated women, women who value and are living proof of education and the benefits of investing in women.

I look at my great grandmother, missionary educated, who raised my grandfather to appreciate an educated woman. My grandfather educated all his children regardless of their sex and married an equally educated teacher, unusual for an African parent in the 1940s and 1950s. Education is the cornerstone of feminism. If women cannot get an education that exposes them to opportunities and an informed understanding of their worth then equality is lost.

The challenge of the African feminist is to teach men how to accept and live with educated and so called liberated African women. I think the question of "what is wrong with our men?" is, to an extent, the fact that our men don’t know how to appreciate the new face of African womanhood.

Feminism is advocacy for equal rights and equal opportunity for women. To be feminist in Africa is to be at a crossroads. It is to stand for women and their humanity in a deeply patriarchal society, where empowerment of women is thought of as un-African or unchristian. It is to fight injustices towards women, like early marriage and FGM, while still fighting modern forms of misogyny like online harassment and rape culture.

There are many misconceptions about feminism, for example, that feminists hate men, that they are ugly, unattractive, that men can’t be feminists. There is also a wilful ignorance; often when I debate I have to start with feminism 101 so we are on the same page – yet people have access to information.

However, there is a lot to be hopeful for. Discussions are being had by women, and men, online and offline about equality. I am encouraged because things can only get better from here.

Join the debate

What does feminism mean to you? Do the issues raised above chime with your experiences? What do you think are the biggest challenges to gender equality in Africa? And what about the age-old question? Are women biologically and socially different from men? And, if so what are the implications for equality? Join the debate in the comment thread below.