I suppose it's just too many triggers and too many things and stressors bringing me back down. I expected it, because I had a great week and doubted being up would last very long.

Although I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, which I take medication for, I still truly wonder whether I do or do not have these illnesses or if it's all just my own character flaws. I expect so much out of myself, but I wish I could just stop everything. I'm going back into my self destructive tendencies again. I think I might try some new drugs just to find some kind of escape (please nobody judge me for this).

Everything's just weird. I'm still me right now, I'm not completely lost just yet and I don't want to be. I'm trying so hard to not allow my mood to drop so low, but can I help it? I hate this.

Hi, sounds like you are cycling, sometimes our illness does this. Have you talked to your Dr. you may need a higher dose of med. Or a change. Do not give in to the low, I know they are awful, but we are here for you to talk to. How about a therapist, that is a good place to talk, or a support group. Remember your brain lies to you, it is part of the illness. I know I am anxiety/depression inflicted and I hate it, but I do my best on any given day to keep the upper hand. Do not call yourself names, do not say you are flawed, we all have something(s) wrong with us. You are a special person, we love you. Do something nice for yourself every day. I send love & peace. Sprinkle 1