OK, everybody's played dollar bill poker, where you use the serial number on a bill to make a poker hand. Same thing. Almost everyone now has a car that has a seven digit odometer. Take those seven digits, and build a five card poker hand.

For example: Your odometer reads 157,556.5 miles, you have four fives. 144,449.4 miles, and you have five fours. 259,299.1, you have a full house, 9's over 2's. For the purposes of this contest, five zeros would beat four nines. Of course, there are no face cards, aces, or jokers. Nothing wild. We're playing stud, cuz, that's how I roll.

You have until Sunday, Nov. 7 at 11:59:59pm to post a picture of your odometer poker hand (a pic of your odometer). Maybe this will keep someone from building a ringer hand.

The winner will have the privilege of saying "Yay, I won!"

ETA: In the unlikely event of an unbreakable tie, the Dwellar with the best cleavage wins.

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You only need five...seven is just the number of cards. You just won't have as many cards to choose from.

Also, if you have a bike, motorcycle, four-wheeler or anything else with an odometer (of at least five digits), that'll work also.

Anyone cheats, and I will fart in your exact direction.

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if i take a new demo this week and it has 00007 on it, i'm going to win?

If no one has 00007.0, cuz, 5 is more than 4. No, really.

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These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

I don't understand this at all.
And the only poker I know how to play is Strip Poker, which is effectively Pontoon anyway. And the only real rule is to pretend you are embarrassed and don't want to take your clothes off so the man you are playing with thinks he is getting away with something, when really you're after the same thing.

BUT.
I will take a photo of Dad's mileage.
And as I am completely clueless you'll have to tell me if I should get him to drive around a bit more.
Because you're so clever and I'm so silly and I really don't want to lose at this you know (innocent look, removing socks)

Just remember to take pictures of your hand...and anything else you uncover!

__________________

These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.