Sunday, May 8, 2016

Green roots

I received a pleasant visit from a friend who runs one of those advanced calculating systems. He shared this with me. He tells me it is very funny, a parody on fellow workers who demand unmerited authority. I don't quite get the technology, but we all know the arrogant striver who wants more authority than he has demonstrated he can handle.

Jessep:You want access?

Kaffee: I think I'm entitled to it.

Jessep: You want access?

Kaffee:I want root!

Jessep: You can't handle root!

Son, we live in a world
that has policies. And those policies have to be guarded by men with root.
Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than
you can possibly fathom. You weep for access and you curse the Admins. You have
that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that your
inability to do what you want, while tragic, probably prevented a crash. And my
existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves systems...You
don't want root. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties,
you want me restricting you. You need me to restrict you.

We use words like availability, performance, service
level...we use these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something.
You use 'em as a punchline.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to
explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very system
stability I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd
rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you
put your ass on the line and stand a shift on-call, explaining to 10,000 users
why the system is down. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're
entitled to!

2 comments:

If you have green roots, bro,they dont go down farwhich is reality... however, lemme fill-you-up withe efficacious epiphany and subliminal epithets of the Great Beyond for you so you, too, shall experience what I did in Oct 30, 85...

Let this be your catalyst to Seventh-Heaven:

'The more you shall honor Me,the more I shall bless you'-the Infant Jesus of Prague(<- Czech Republic, next to Russia)

If you have green roots, bro,they dont go down farwhich is reality... however, lemme fill-you-up withe efficacious epiphany and subliminal epithets of the Great Beyond for you so you, too, shall experience what I did in Oct 30, 85...

Let this be your catalyst to Seventh-Heaven:

'The more you shall honor Me,the more I shall bless you'-the Infant Jesus of Prague(<- Czech Republic, next to Russia)

About Me

I started in Vaudeville as an actor and comedian, achieving moderate success. One day I was left stranded in Northern Alberta when my manger absconded with all of the funds as well as my train ticket. I was forced into a life of crime, which I quickly found found paid better and was better for meeting girls than acting. The rest is history