Must-See TV
Army Of Darkness
ElRey
5 p.m.
A discount-store employee is time-warped to a medieval castle, where he is the foretold savior who can dispel the evil there. Unfortunately, he screws up and releases an army of skeletons. (tvguide.com)

The [Monday] Papers

"Facing administrative turnover and a growing number of vacancies in recent years, the UI has increasingly turned to outside search firms to find new leaders," the Champaign News-Gazettereports.

"The price tag? Almost $6 million over the last nine years, paid to nearly two dozen different consulting firms. In one of the most recent instances, the UI paid $90,000 to one firm for three weeks of work to recruit men's basketball coach John Groce."

Speech Impediment
"The forthcoming summit of the North Atlantic Treaty Organization, set for May 20 and 21 in Chicago, could be the first public test of H.R. 347, the recently passed law that expanded the ability of the Secret Service to suppress protests in or around certain restricted zones near individuals under its protection," the ACLU says.

"What will be particularly interesting (read: alarming) is if the Secret Service starts to use the law to get at protests that are physically removed from the event. For instance, if a lawful protest that is within earshot of the summit gets rowdy enough that it 'disrupts' the 'orderly conduct of Government business or official functions,' does that trigger the statute? We just don't know. The Secret Service certainly has the ability and obligation to secure the individuals it protects, but it also must permit lawful protest to be seen and heard. It cannot use H.R. 347 to 'sanitize' the summit."