Dear Robert DeNiro: Next time around, let Chris Colfer write your material. Because the Glee star sure came out swinging with some choice sound bites upon arriving backstage after collecting his Golden Globe award for supporting actor.

TVLine has recapped the most bon mots served up by Colfer, The Big Bang Theory‘s Jim Parsons and some of TV’s other winners.

Chris Colfer, Glee
“I have my big-boy pants on, so I am trying not to [cry].”

“I hate to say that I am a Cinderfella, but I really kind of feel like it tonight.”

“I was on the phone with my mom [after winning]. I was trying to say, “I can’t talk right now because I am in the press room.” “You’re in the restroom?” “No, the press room.”

Colfer’s high school debate teacher, Kendra McCoy, once told him, “‘As long as you accept who you are, no one can ever use you against you.’ She will never take credit for it, but she was definitely my Will Schuester.”

“I really hope the LAPD lets me off with a warning tonight, because I’m probably going to go crazy. I don’t have tickets [to all the parties], but hopefully this [trophy] will get me in.”

“I completely embarrassed myself in front of Helena Bonham Carter…. I saw her on the red carpet and literally screamed in her face. So I will publicly apologize to her right now.”

Claire Danes, Temple Grandin
“Now I can actually stuff my bra because I have got two [Golden Globe awards]. I need a little stuffing.”

“[The real Temple Grandin] is a spectacularly gifted, brave person. I just feel so fortunate to have had a chance to really consider her and think deeply about who she is and attempt to embody her…. Boy, is she real. I love her.”

Jim Parsons, The Big Bang Theory
“As soon as [costar Kaley Cuoco] opened the envelope, by the way she moved or whatever; the noise that came out of her mouth, I could tell [I had won].”

“[Like Sheldon] I do tend to be an awkward mover in real life. [The way] I have my hand on my head right now… who does that?”

Terrence Winter, Boardwalk Empire executive producer
“[Those who questioned the casting of Globe winner Steve Buscemi] were wrong, as I knew they were. This was the easiest casting decision in the world for me. Steve’s terrific.”

Jane Lynch, Glee
(Pretending to confirm a “report” that she is the show’s big diva.) “That is absolutely the truth. I am like the queen. They have to kiss my ring.”

Katey Sagal, Sons Of Anarchy
(Fielding one reporter’s suggestion that she someday play Sarah Palin) “I would have to use a gun. Actually, I do that on Sons Of Anarchy, so it is not that big a stretch.”

“No!” (Sagal’s husband and SoA creator Kurt Sutter, shouting from the back of the room, when a reporter asks if Katey’s Globes win will make him kinder to awards shows)