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Well, hello, nice to see you here.My friending policy is fairly simple; comment to say 'Hi' and add me, and I will (probably) add you back. Most of my journal entries are public anyway. The private/friends only ones are that way for a reason.

This is usually the time of day when I hit a brick wall and have to go have a nap so as to be functionable at all later on (5pm). But I have to catch a train in forty mintues, which does not take into account the ten to fifteen minute walk to the station, so I don't have time for a nap. Which kind of sucks. Tonight I am doing sound for "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown" and then supposedly going out for drinks with some friends from juggling club. But I have the horrible suspicion I will just come back home after the play and go to bed. I dunno, the fatigue is going okay, I no longer have to spend whole days in bed, but I'm only really functionable for about ten hours a day (not including my one hour nap in the afternoon).

I'm trying, and failing, to write a story about the guy I kind of fell in love with in Chicago. I have to write a 1,500 word piece based off a memory or observation for my Creative Writing subject at uni, but I'm worried this piece isn't actually working as a story for itself, more just I feel like I should write something about it for me. I don't know. I may be asking for volunteers to read through it next week if it actually progresses at all (Mandie?).

The Boy is ignoring me, which isn't great for one's self esteem. But I have had some flattering offers from some other people, so if nothing with said boy progresses over the next week, then tough luck for him I suppose.

I have decided I am going to buy myself another tattoo for my birthday. I think I'm going to get a eucalyptus flower like one of these down the inside of my ankle onto my foot. But given November is a long way off ideas may change between now and then.

Finally, I have given up alcohol, mainly for health reasons. Please inform me of your displeasure if I talk about me drinking on here.♥

Firstly I chose Candidate C. And I think I've fallen for him already. We are both very private people who pretend to be more open than we are, and yet we can both read each other like books. I've never before met someone who can call me on what I'm not saying as much as what I am saying. And it both terrifies and excites me, consequently, I can't stop thinking about him.

Uni is stifling after last year. I've made a couple of friends, and enjoy most of my subjects. But I just find the atmosphere of the place so artificial and contrived. It is, practically, the most prestigious university in Australia, and yet there are so many people there who have no idea how the world works - they're these little ideological naive students who appear to have never lived in the world outside of their insular bubble. And, christ, I know how judgmental and hypocritical that sounds, but I just...

Last week I was really very ill. My fatigue was bad, and I spent two days in bed. It was starting to go to my head, so I decided to go and talk to one of the uni counsellors. She pointed out how the discrepancy between my health last year and this year don't really make sense. She asked whether it might be my mental health impinging on my physical health - whether I'm actually not happy where I am right now and whether that might be emphasizing my preexisting condition.And I think she's right.

It's really odd how you can be happy with your life on a small scale and unhappy with your life on the larger scale. While I am home, can spend time with friends I couldn't see for nine months, am enjoying some of my subjects, and may be falling in love, this is not where I want to be.So the next choice is where do I want to be? And how do I get there?

Talking about going places; I'm going away for Easter with my family, and then away on juggling club camp. So I won't be around for a while. But I'll be thinking of you guys, so take care.♥

2. My Great Aunt died last week. She refused to let people look after her when she was really far beyond looking after herself. It looked as though she hadn't bathed properly since before New Years and died partly of starvation.

3. Have been assigned a Disability Liaison Officer for university. They can rearrange classes, extend due dates and organise alternate exam arrangements for me. Let us hope that is enough; uni looks as though it will be fun, and I don't want to have to give that up.

Last night I went to see The Vagina Monologues with steppi. And it was fascinating. For those of you who don't know what the Vagina Monolgoes are, they are a set of stories about women written by Eve Ensler covering the issues of sexuality, love, life, sex and vaginas. Its point is to raise awareness about the issues that surround women, the main one being; violence against women. The monologues included one about giving birth, one about periods, one about rape, and a stunning one about being a transvestite performed by five transvestites called "They Beat the Girl out of My Boy".

As I was saying to acroamatica a couple of days ago, I never really think of myself as being female. I am who I am, and while sometimes I hate how much stronger guys are than me, I never really think of them as being any different to me. But I suppose we are.

On Tuesday I went out to the main teenager hangout a suburb along from mine to celebrate a friend's birthday and had a horrible time. Please, remind me never to go there again. It was full of the kind of girl I hated in high school. It just makes me feel so inadequate that I don't wear that type of clothing, or bother straightening my hair and putting on a face full of make up. But I'm not inadequate! I swear I'm not! And there are so many nicer bars in the city! If I ever mention The Hawthorn, The Glenferrie or Nevermind again, slap me.

I am, however, going out again tonight to exactly the kind of bar I love in the city. Hip without trying too hard, full of little (and not so little) punk boys with tattoos, and good music playing.

I have also been hit over the head with a new tattoo idea, and want to go out and get it right now. But I won't, because I'm sensible.Last weekend I was in the city and a lady in front of me had little bows on the back of her lower leg; just at the top of her Achilles tendon. I want to get a pair of those big headphones, like the ones DJs wear? In the same place. Just, yes.

I know that many of you here are neither Australian nor in Australia. But for those of us who are, today is a historic day, and one on which I am proud to say 'I am Australian.'

The treatment of aboriginals by the settlers of this continent was terrible, humiliating, and shameful. We poisoned them, murdered them, destroyed their culture and languages, and stole their land. But we also stole their children so that they could be brought up in either orphanages or with white families to be taught Christianity and how to act white so that they could integrate into our obviously superior way of life.

Eight years ago I marched with my family in a one million strong, Australia wide reconciliation march that fell on the deaf ears of the previous conservative Howard government. And while John Howard did not attend today's ceremony (despite every other living ex-Prime Minister being in attendance) and the current leader of his party made an incongruous, pathetic speech that entirely missed the point, this was so important to so many people and should have happened a long time ago.

While a simple apology will not heal the wrongs done, nor reconcile those still mourning the loss of family members it is a start. We are admitting to a wrong done, giving us a platform from which we can start to address on going problems among Aboriginal communities.

"Today we honour the Indigenous peoples of this land, the oldest continuing cultures in human history.

We reflect on their past mistreatment.

We reflect in particular on the mistreatment of those who were Stolen Generations – this blemished chapter in our nation’s history.

The time has now come for the nation to turn a new page in Australia’s history by righting the wrongs of the past and so moving forward with confidence to the future.

We apologise for the laws and policies of successive Parliaments and governments that have inflicted profound grief, suffering and loss on these our fellow Australians.

We apologise especially for the removal of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander children from their families, their communities and their country.

For the pain, suffering and hurt of these Stolen Generations, their descendants and for their families left behind, we say sorry.

To the mothers and the fathers, the brothers and the sisters, for the breaking up of families and communities, we say sorry.

And for the indignity and degradation thus inflicted on a proud people and a proud culture, we say sorry.

We the Parliament of Australia respectfully request that this apology be received in the spirit in which it is offered as part of the healing of the nation.

For the future we take heart; resolving that this new page in the history of our great continent can now be written.

We today take this first step by acknowledging the past and laying claim to a future that embraces all Australians.

A future where this Parliament resolves that the injustices of the past must never, never happen again.

A future where we harness the determination of all Australians, Indigenous and non-Indigenous, to close the gap that lies between us in life expectancy, educational achievement and economic opportunity.

A future where we embrace the possibility of new solutions to enduring problems where old approaches have failed.

A future based on mutual respect, mutual resolve and mutual responsibility.

A future where all Australians, whatever their origins, are truly equal partners, with equal opportunities and with an equal stake in shaping the next chapter in the history of this great country, Australia."- Kevid Rudd, Australian Prime Minister 2007-

You know what's not cool? A friend cancelling on you for a family reason and then accidentally sending you a text about the club they and the person they meant to send the text to are going to that night. Some people just aren't very clever. Also finding out that old friends don't count you as a friend any more.

But you know what is cool? Realising how lucky you are with your friends and life. On Friday night I went to a picnic at my little sister's school, then went go-karting with my brother and father, and then went out to drinks with two girls I have known (although not always been close to) since I moved to Australia in 1995. That's nearly 13 years! And then although yesterday a friend cancelled on me because she wasn't feeling well (we were planning on going to see a documentary at the Australian Centre for the Moving Image about the development of gay rights in Australia as part of the Midsumma Gay and Lesbian Festival), I ended up going to a free concert in the city with my brother for the launch of a favourite band's first LP (The Getaway Plan). At which I bumped into Jaddan (who manages The Getaway Plan), the guy I'm going to be working for as part of my internship, although he was really busy he sent me a text that night to say it was nice to see me and we should go for drinks again at some point. I then went to two 20th birthday parties, got really very drunk, talked about music a lot, and made friends with a girl called Bronwyn who was dressed as Sid Vicious and was talking about being bi. Which is lovely. :)

Work is also going okay. I've been writing a manual explaining how to do what I've been doing for the past two months, which is 75% finished and 25 pages long. Shit.

And although I'm not always happy (I had a really bad patch last week, it all just hurt), at this point I can appreciate that life is really pretty good. Oh, I'm happy and it's wonderful.

I have also been writing again. I will keep you all posted, but at the moment all I'm going to say is that Patrick and Frank are faeries, Pete is a wizard and Andy is a centaur. Well, obviously. Duh.

Is it healthy to have a job in which you spend half your day on news websites or blogs? No one in my office ever seems to do any work. Given my contract is about to end I'd do their work for them just to have something to spend my time/life on.Somehow I feel as though they are all going to make more of an impact on the world than I will anyway. Researching the link between occupation and disease seems more important than music. Should you do something you enjoy, or something that will help others, or both? I wish I had twice as many hours in the day as I do (or that I don't have to sleep as much as I do, have booked myself in to see a chronic fatigue specialist.)

Music makes me feel alive, y'know? (And in the immortal *cough* words of Fall Out Boy; And if you say this makes you happy, I'm not the only one lying.) So maybe it could help?

Went to Big Day Out (by far the biggest festival in Australia) on Monday; Something With Numbers, British India, Anti Flag, Mammal, Gyroscope, Hilltop Hoods, Behind Crimson Eyes, Billy Brag, Grinspoon, Arcade Fire, Silverchair, Brand New and Rage Against the Machine. *phew*It was a fantastic day. Lots of bands, lots of music, lots of lovely people (a couple of assholes, but there always are). Bought a grey Big Day Out '08 t-shirt with ducks on the front.

Thoughts about dating friends? Don't want to lose him as a friend, can't bear the thought of breaking up with him. But if I carry on at this rate I'll be single for life. (Something in me cringes at the thought of dieing alone, or at least dieing before not being alone. Brand New; I realise that everyone who lives will someday die, and die alone.)Quoting lyrics, pathetic? Y/Y?