Thursday, November 15, 2012

So what has been happening few kilometers away from me really affected me in the past few days.
I already talked about the evil in people, and I've read about massacres, but this is the first time I feel concerned about one of them.
Palestine (and I insist on the name PALESTINE) ; where the holy lands of 3 religions exist. Unfortunately, a shattered people unified themselves and took over this lovely land and made it theirs. They took over the culture, destroyed the olive trees, expelled people out of their country for no relevant reason because they 'refused' to live with them, despite the fact that they were and still are the outcasts. Yes they live in a land bordered by Arab countries, and yes those 'arabs' did nothing to help their so called brothers.
They built one or two refugee camps and blamed every wrong thing in the country on them. And no for those who think that the Palestinians are the reason behind the Lebanese civil war, this is not true, retarded Lebanese people blamed them because they don't even have to courage and honesty to blame themselves for ruining their own country and destabilizing it.
So this people unified themselves and did everything to break the spirit of resistance and revolt in the heart of not only Palestinians but all of the Arabs. Palestine is now a suitcase with no owner.
Today, the attack on Gaza started again, killing dozens of innocent people. But this is nothing new, everyday people are being killed, from unborn children ripped out of pregnant women to the elders being kicked out of their homes and sometimes being beaten brutally for resisting to humiliation. Never ending widows, orphans and mother who lost their children. This is for Gaza. Not to talk about the humiliation people face at checkpoints in the "territories under Palestinian administration". Zionists consider themselves very generous for granting some cities to a traitor who is ruling over them right now and who is denying the right to return for millions around the world. Israelis are saying the Palestinians were born on a land that is no longer theirs, but they will cross their barriers, their checkpoints their damn apartheid walls and return to their homeland, THEY ARE RETURNING TO FALESTIN.
People in the Palestinian territories live in fear everyday. Some Zionists go and run over children just to have fun and nobody can tell them everyday. How would you feel if your child went out to get you something and he doesn't come back because some sick selfish insecure ran over him considering him his next demographic threat?
And let's talk about this whole accusing Hamas of sending children to throw rocks during Intifada, you tell them they send their children off to die but those are your copters, your F16s and THEIR skies. You accuse their children of being terrorists because they are throwing STONES on your TANKS.
But no, we won't let you do this anymore, or at least I wont. I won't stay silent when I see that people consider it okay for an illegal state to attack innocent people to "protect" the so called security of "their" country, and accuse people demanding their rights and their land back of being baby killers, of having babies that will be beard wearing, gun waving terrorists. At least their grandparents didn't run around like clowns with white capes and white hoods on their heads linshing black people. For the sake of God Israel stole their land and killed their children, isn't it a sufficient reason to resist, to fight?
Even though I'm not Palestinian I DESPISE everything related to israel. They always ask me why so much hatered? "Never hate anyone, hate is a very strong word" they always told me.
Do you remember 1948 when they killed their grandparents, killed them? When they expelled thousands of them? Do you remember when they took over their homes and what's left of their culture? When they ate oft their bread, drank of their water, slept on their beds? When they pulled out their olive trees? Yes their sacred olive trees? Do you remember when they pulled Roumiyeh out? Do you feel them screaming for justice, just to live between four walls again, and not sleeping between the massacres and the trees with nothing to protect them? Do you feel their fear of the cattle , their fear of sleeping and not waking up? How much those poor people will have to take anymore? Do you remember 1967? Do you remember when Haifa and Akka were still arab? You weren't born there, but they remember them. They live still in their souls. Do you see the broken heart of a woman who lost her son for the battle for the return? Do you remember how they stole the Aqsa? How they burnt the heart of the Aqsa? Do you remember how they prevented millions of pelrins from praying there? With a stupid, useless apartheid wall?
I protest against your memory, I protest. Because I had to remind you of every painful experience they went and are still going through to excuse a little, a very tiny part of my hatered towards them. I don't know why I'm talking to you. Maybe Palestine needs the good person you have in you deep inside. But I ask you, in honor of their land, their soil, their culture, their old houses, I ask you in honor of the martyrs, the fighters, the activists, in honor of Aqsa and Beit Lehem, in honor of the BLEEDING GAZA, to remember Gaza. Oh how I thought about where would be placed all the dead bodies. There is not enough space to fit the children and the thousands of dead Gazawis anymore. But the war, and only the war needs no space for graves, because its a grave itself. Schools, mosques, homes, women and children. All of them bombed with fire filled "with love" signed by their children. How pathetic. But I am proud of myself for remembering, and even though I'm not Palestinian, i feel inside of me a land heated by all my love for it.
Palestine, I consider you my home. And i want to apologize to you for all the stupidity and failure the arabs have gotten to. We couldn't save you. And we didn't free you.
But apologies don't bring back what you lost, and they don't heal all the knives planted in you. So accept my humble words, Palestine. As Mahmoud Darwish said; you deserve to live.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

What does it mean to judge someone? Is it to have an assumption about wether their actions are appropriate or not? Or is it to have an opinion about the personality of the person themself?
If we are talking about the first idea, if we have principles that censure the acts that the others might do and might sound wrong to us, we will end up judging people frequently. But I don't see anything wrong with "judging" that way. The idea that we have to let go of all the standards of morality in fear of feeling guilty for having negative opinion about others is something that i personally consider absolutely dumb and stupid even though people "pretend" to do so.
Some may say we have no right what so ever to judge someone because we are not better than them. True, nobody is perfect. And yes, we judge people because we are insecure, we want to boost our self confidence and most of all justify the wrong actions we do by convincing ourselves that what this person did was worse than anything we have ever done and therefore it was okay to do what we did. So technically we are contradicting ourselves and distorting our so called "sense of morality" .
You are probably thinking "how can i set the standard for judging anything?". Well, actually what you decide to be right and wrong has a direct impact on you. Think about it, if you see someone doing something "wrong" what you think won't affect the other person. They won't even realize that you don't approve what they did. Unless you let them know. And it is usually by spreading rumors or turning people against them, that is when judging becomes wrong. So your judgment really only affects you.
Concerning the second idea, I believe that it is difficult to form a valid opinion about the personality of someone; you should know a person enough to justify the formation of your point of view (either a negative or a positive one) which is really difficult nowadays. Nothing and no one is real. You have the constant fear of being not good enough, and you are (or try to be) what you want others to like. That is what life is. Even friends fear being judged. When you care about someone you would want to have a good image in their eyes, so you spend a big part of your time analyzing what happens around you and you will always keep your guard up in fear of making any mistake that would make you lose their respect towards you. So you would find yourself anxious around others, and this might have serious consequences on you, you will "feed your fears and let them grow even more."
You cannot live without judging anyone, but you have to learn how to judge yourself as well so you could live in peace.
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone, so take a break and do the right choices even if it might jeopardize your life stability.s

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Today after a very inspiring talk with a responsible in our school, I began thinking about why I want to leave Lebanon. Where do those thoughts come from?
There's a plan to disgust us from our country. But what is the definition of a country? A land? A land with people? A country is not only land, nor only people. A country is a mix of history, culture (and maybe Tabbouleh and Hummus in Lebanon). If I want to go study and maybe live abroad does that make me any less patriotic than a person who stays in Lebanon? Leaving doesn't mean I have no attachment. This is anything but true. Belonging to your country is not only physical, it is belonging to principles that are the reason this country exists.This is not correct. "Leave this country" they said. "People who stay here are stupid and useless" All those who lived their whole life in Lebanon are stupid and imbeciles? All of them lived and died purposeless? NO.
Immigration is spiritual before being physical. Making you lose your patriotism is making you give up on your principles, your culture and the history you are holding on your shoulders, the history you inherited and that you're gonna pass to the next generation either you want it or not. That history isn't ours, we do not own it, what we can preserve and add to it is what we're gonna pass to the ones after us. You take nothing with you from this life. We are ephemeral, not here to last. Why do they want to take the love we have for our country from us? Why do they try to make our lives a living hell everyday just so we would leave this place?
An Arab philosopher named Ebn el Rushd once said "Ideas have wings, nobody can stop the knowledge to get to anyone". Don't go with the flow that sickens you from your country, who pushes you to give up, who takes you to somewhere others chose for you. This is mentally expelling you from your country this is CULTURAL COLONIZATION for God's sake! Colonization is not over, it is not only conquering lands with arms, it never was over. The older generation makes the choices for you, going from the personal level; your parents and family, to the national and global level which includes the politicians ruling your country and the world. And this is how life is.
The only way to fight against this cultural colonization is to know. To be aware. Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Maybe I chose to leave Lebanon, but this is MY choice after knowing the reason behind me wanting to leave. Not because I'm applying people's choices on my life without even trying to know why, people who, since my early age, pushed me to despise my country and to be pessimistic about everything related to it.
Knowledge is your only path to freedom. YOU can't be free if you don't know, if you don't think.
What about the generations to come? Should we pray for God to help them get through the tough years to come? Yes. But what we will have to face needs a lot more luck and prayers: Life. For now there are people around me who care about me and who try to protect me always and guide me, but they won't be here forever.
Life clears its debts with you.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

November 6 1941: Stalin addressed the Soviet Union for only the second time during his three-decade rule. He states that even though 350 thousand troops were killed in German attacks so far, the Soviet victory was near. It was a legendary day and a reminder for me that when things aren’t going the way I hope or planned, I can begin to do things differently in order to see different results and regain my happiness and power.
The world lost thousands of lives. The number of people who lived on this planet is estimated to be 106,456,367,669 and the world population today is nearly 7,000,000,000 people. Yet the 7 billions have made more impact on this planet than the 106 billions who lived before.
In the past 100 years, important breakthroughs happened like the invention of instant coffee (yes I consider that one of the most important inventions and I thank god everyday for letting that happen otherwise you wouldn't see me blogging right now) , the creation of Google, the absolute savior of all of us , and of course other things like vaccines, halogen lights, atomic bombs etc.
The human kind does nothing but trying to trigger wars and hatred towards the other. Gossip everyday, racism, non-tolerance, no respect. When my faith in humanity was at its lowest, something (or should I say someone) came and restored it. Suddenly, there was hope, hope that the love that God planted somewhere deep in our hearts wasn't lost. Hope that you could fight the evil, hope that good can triumph.
Malala Yousafzai, a 15 year old Pakistani school girl and activist. On October 9th 2012, she was shot in the head and neck in an assassination attempt by Taliban gunmen while returning home on a school bus. This girl wrote a blog when Taliban banned the education of the girls in her region. She stood up against terrorism, she fought for her rights, the simple right of having a decent education. Is that too much to ask, equality between the genders? "I don't care if I sit on the floor. All I want is education and I am afraid of no one.” that is one of her famous sayings. This girl risked her life for equality, for dignity, for the rights of every single child, the rights that someone other than God is trying to take away from her, someone ephemeral who is just a visitor to this world, who is eventually gonna leave this planet by the explosion of a bomb or a bullet in the head.
The right to education is denied to 61 million children of primary school age around the world. Girls, boys, the marginalized, rural children, child laborers, the hopes of these 61 million are represented by the struggle and voice of this girl.
Yesterday, Malala strived her way to recovery and woke up from coma, after a month of being left to death by her assassins. She is sending us the same message that Stalin left on November 6. Never give up. Its amazing how the same exact message could be sent by someone evil who tortured and killed billions, who stole the money of his people , and by someone so innocent, pure, young, yet so wise who is standing up for millions of deprived children.
This girl gave me hope. She gave me a reason to believe in humanity. On Saturday, the world will celebrate Malala Day, we will honor her sacrifice. The reactions of people gave me hope. The cry of thousands for Malala against terrorism gave me hope. Hope, never experienced that feeling before. Maybe someday the human race will be able to get over that sickness called "hate". Maybe we will forget how jealousy, envy, hate feel like.
Looking at my life, there are many times when I almost gave up. But now i have hope. I can begin working to turn things around to get me ready for the day when I will be proud of the human kind. If we want to embrace change, we must first acknowledge the need and desire for change. Malala triggered that need of change in me, and in the spirit of thousands of people.
I can work on becoming more hopeful and I can approach people with a more positive attitude. I can try to see the good side of them even when evil is all that they're showing me. I can try to NEVER GIVE UP on anything that I want to accomplish even when someone is pulling me down. I can build some momentum and make my happiness a goal and a priority, but I choose to include others as well, fight for their happiness when they can longer fight for their own. Now I know why community service was such an important part of my life, Malala gave me the answer to a question I never could really answer; the satisfaction after seeing the smile you drew on a person's face. I thank you for that Malala.