Monday, August 22, 2016

Big changes yesterday in the AL Last Hope One Game Away Game Turkey Wild Card Scam Berth race: Both KC and Houston leapfrogged us, meaning six teams - up from four - now lead us.

You don't need me to blather - once again - how hopeless this is. Our pennant chances are murkier than Trump's mass deportation force. Still, let's close our eyes and imagine:

We sweep Seattle. Three games, boom.

If we sweep, we would:

a) Be tied with the Mariners in the loss column.

b) Destroy their faith in God. If anything, they might start believing they are on His shit-list. (They're on mine, BTW.)

c) Probably climb ahead of Detroit, Houston and KC, although the Astros are playing Minnesota, so they might maintain pace.

d) Probably gain on the O's, who face a brutal bragging rights series against the Nats, but not necessarily on Boston, (Rays) and Toronto (mighty Angels.)

e) Add to the chances that Robbie never jogs out a grounder in a Seattle post-season - cosmic payback to abandoning his TV family for gold. (He loves only gold. Only gold. ONLY gold. Only gold. He loves gold. He loves only gold. He loves GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD.)

So there we have it. One last chance to upend - or suspend - reality: We cannot "win the series." We would still be two behind Seattle, which has a breakfast buffet schedule full of Angels and A's. We must sweep. Michael Pineda must throw a vengeance shutout. Gary Sanchez must stay hot. And Aaron Judge needs to play, not rest.

In years past, this would have started stomachs churning in the opposing dugout. But on Sunday, Angels reliever J. C. Ramirez was not facing vintage sluggers named Rodriguez, Teixeira, Beltran or McCann.

He was facing Didi Gregorius and Starlin Castro.

True dat. But the truth is, Tex, A-Rod and McCann have failed us. We had better chances with Didi and Castro. But another truth is that neither belongs in a slugger's spot.

If there is anything to fear, it's that Didi decides he is supposed to hit HRs to justify batting fourth. All we need is another pull hitter reduced to nothingness by defensive over-shifts. The Yankees have a cleanup hitter. His name is Aaron Judge. I hope he has been properly rested, because the last fantasy of 2016 happens over the next three nights. Lose tonight, and we can rest throughout October.

3 comments:

I think Girardi needs a rest. Maybe Pena can manage for a few games while Joe studies his binders and realizes Tex, Headley, maybe McCann, probably Hicks all need a ticket to Palookaville on the express train.