Posts tagged Phoenix Suns

The next time you see a spider in your shower, be prepared. Have a surefire plan of attack. The following methods are your best weapons to combat an unsightly spider found hiding inside your home.

10. Firearm

If you want an effective way to kill a spider, a firearm will get the job done. A .44 caliber Ruger should do the trick.

9. Call Chuck Norris

The truth is, you don’t need a firearm to kill a spider… Chuck Norris is an equally efficient killing machine!

8. Play Carly Rae Jepsen’s, “Call Me Maybe”

If you see a dangerous spider in your home, take the following preventative steps: Step 1: Put in earplugs. Step 2: Turn on the radio and find Carly Rae Jepsen’s, “Call Me Maybe.” With as much airplay as that song gets, it should be easy to find playing on some station. Step 3: Point the speakers in the spider’s direction and watch as it instantly falls to it’s death. Note: Playing anything by Justin Bieber is also equally effective.

7. Hairspray

When you see a spider running across your ceiling, grab the nearest can of hairspray. Enough of the sticky spray will freeze that spider in it’s tracks. Even if it doesn't kill it; the spider will still have great hair.

6. Eat The Spider

A delicious way to kill a spider, assuming the spider is not dangerous, is to eat it. Marinade the spider with some garlic, thyme, olive oil and cayenne pepper; then toss it with some garden fresh arugula. Enjoy! Many cultures regularly eat spiders, scorpions, and other insects.

5. Smash Spider In An Oreo Cookie

When that unsightly spider is running across your kitchen counter-top, grab your nearby bag of Oreo cookies. Take an Oreo apart, and quickly smash the spider in the Oreo’s cream. On top of killing the spider, you’ll also gain internet fame when you post a photo online claiming that you found the spider inside. Read more about the Oreo Spider here: http://blogpestcontrol.com/2013/03/spider-found-in-oreo-real-or-fake/

4. Good Old Fashion Boot

Image Source: tomatoesforapples.blogspot.com

You see a spider running across your bedroom floor and you freeze. Don’t panic-- Now’s the time to react quickly. A thick-soled, steel toed boot is your best ally at this point. Slip it on, and stomp. Keep stomping! Twenty or thirty times should be efficient. If you want to try a different strategy with the boot, and have good aim, throw the boot at the spider and run!

3. Make The Spider Sit Through A Phoenix Suns Game

WARNING: Watch a Phoenix Suns game at your own risk... Viewer discretion is advised. If you want the spider to suffer a slow and painful death, subject the spider to a 2013 Phoenix Suns basketball game. One half of inept basketball should be enough to put the spider out of it’s misery.

2. Flamethrower

If you want an effective way to kill a spider, a flamethrower is one of your best bets. Even though you may risk burning your house to the ground, you know that spider is not coming out of it alive.

A surefire way to kill a spider, and keep them from ever entering your home in the first place, is to hire Bulwark Pest Control. If you want a money back guaranteed spider control solution; then call Bulwark today and start living a spider free life! It’s just easier than any of the above methods.

*** Disclaimer***Bulwark Exterminating does not recommend the shooting of spiders with firearms, treating them with a flamethrower, or eating them with arugula. Watch a Phoenix Suns game at your own risk... Viewer discretion is advised.In some cases, like those of the Black Widow or Brown Recluse, spiders can be dangerous. Avoid striking a venomous spider. Doing so may simply knock them to the floor, where they can easily escape. The spider may also fall onto your hand or another part of your body and bite.