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With Season 27 of Dancing With the Stars kicking off tonight (and with me covering it for our live blog on ETOnline), I thought it would be fun to try to make some pre-premiere predictions for how this season’s slate of stars will fare in their race for the coveted Mirrorball trophy.

Here’s my take on who goes out first, who makes the final three and who wins the whole thing.

First Contestant Out: Nikki Glaser and partner Gleb Savchenko (Comedians always seem to drop out quickly (maybe because they don’t take it seriously, or get embarrassed, or don’t care?)

Final Three:
Juan Pablo Di Pace and Cheryl Burke (He’s a handsome actor with a background in musical theater, and she’s a returning fan favorite.)

Tinashe and Brandon Armstrong (Tinashe is already a professional dancer, and the closest to a ringer this season has. Plus, this is Armstrong’s first season as a pro and he likely wants to prove himself)

Mary Lou Retton and Sasha Farber (She’s a revered Olympic gold medal gymnast and Sasha is awesome and you can’t not love Sasha.)

Winner: Tinashe and Brandon Armstrong (I think her experience with a dance background will give her an edge that lasts all season, like when Jordan Fisher was the frontrunner right from the first episode of Season 25)

Rest of the Lineup:2nd Place: Juan Pablo Di Pace and Cheryl Burke3rd Place: Mary Lou Retton and Sasha Farber4th Place: Danelle Umstead and Artem Chigvintsev5th Place: DeMarcus Ware and Lindsay Arnold6th Place: Evanna Lynch and Keo Motsepe (Keo usually gets saddled with stars who have no chance going in, so it’ll be interesting to see what he’s able to do with the 27-year-old Harry Potter actress)7th Place: Nancy McKeon and Val Chmerkovskiy (Her Facts of Life nostalgia factor will take her a long way, as well as Val’s considerable fan base.)8th Place: “Grocery Store Joe” Amabile and Jenna Johnson (Being a Bachelorette fan favorite will get him plenty of votes, especially if he can dance at all.)9th Place: Bobby Bones Sharna Burgess10th Place: Alexis Ren and Alan Bersten11th Place: John Schneider and Emma Slater12th Place: Milo Manheim and Witney Carson (He seems like a talented dancer, but having a fan base plays a huge role and he’s literally only be in one Disney channel movie.)13th Place: Nikki Glaser and Gleb Savchenko

Obviously, there’s a good chance all of this will be wrong, but I’ll be watching all season to see how things turn out (and I may possibly update once we get to see the stars hit the dance floor for the first time.)