Be all you can beAnd in all that time, did you?Think again buddy - Furqan Takada

The live fast, die faster lifestyle of feng shui master Furqan Takada (October 27, 1920 – October 27, 1949) was equally tragic as it was intense. Born to a catholic mother in Geneva, Switzerland who had escaped the Belfast riots two months earlier, Takada was half Japanese and half Irish. While not a secret, Takada’s mother had a lengthy affair with the poet Manhae however; it has been proven that Takada’s father was not the famed poet. Takada’s parents had lived in Seoul for several years (his mother was a fashion model while his father was an engineer with the Sino-British division of Harland and Wolff shipyards) until the Samil Movement began spiraling out of control. On the occasion of a particular violent demonstration, Takada’s father took sides with the Korean uprising and was severely beaten by Japanese police. The couple was transported back to Ireland for medical care with Takada’s father dying under a year later. A widow with a newborn son, Takada’s mother took a job at a bakery but later moved into banking. Early in his life, Takada displayed a knack for reading and writing. His handwriting was especially neat and clean as early as six years old and his disposition for reading and comprehending philosophy and medical text was considered – by some – miraculous. At 20, Furqan Takada graduated from Universität Basel, focusing on theology and economics with his thesis on consumer-based theocracy continuing to spark debate around the campus. He attempted to pursue a doctorate in science (mainly astrology) but grew restless and (with a loan from his mother) started a furniture consulting agency. His trademark, writing recommendations in poetic form on very high quality papers, became highly prized chits among the literary elite. A patron invited Takada to write the first thirteen chapters of the Douay-Rheims Bible on 400 year old animal vellum. These pages were then framed and auctioned at ridiculous prices due in large part to the unique elegance of Takada’s handwriting. Two years later, the same patron secured a dozen sheets of Imperial mitsumatagami and asked Takada to transcribe several Buddhist scriptures onto them. Takada finished six sheets, each selling at ludicrous collector prices... much to Takada’s disbelief. In early 1948, Takada started dating French violinist, Ginette Neveu with the two announcing plans for marriage by summer 1949. On October 27, the couple boarded an Air France flight en route to series of concert engagements. All 48 passengers on board the flight, including the famous French boxing champion Marcel Cerdan, died when the plane flew into a mountain after two failed attempts to make a landing at the São Miguel Island airport in the Azores. It is said that Neveu's body was found clutching their marriage vows written by Takada. Today’s entry is from a posthumous lithographic collection of Takada’s writing (titled Pro Tanto Quid Retribuamus) and is published on our site with direct permission from Takada’s estate.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Some useful advices for you health

As young manBe the stud you should be instantlyBe a secret shopperBe always readyBe careful of cheap imitationsBe confident and stand tallBe full of energy and fill your partner with itBe gaastra to earpBe headingBe satisfied for lifeBe the “biggest” out of all your friendsBe the bestBe the man you can be todayBe the most confident man in townBeater more insaneThese positions will help you reach your peak. - Gertrude Laakkonen

Among the poets of the circumpolar peoples, none is more revered than Gertrude Laakkonen (October 2, 1452 – November 10, 1518). Raised in Sámi culture before the mass conversion by the Russian Monk Trifon, Laakkonen’s family made a comfortable living on the husbandry of rangifer tarandus fennicus. Her family’s expansive ranch (named Joulumuori) in Joulupukki, Finland provided the ideal location for Laakkonen to contemplate the eternal question of the sielulintu, "Onkos täällä kilttejä lapsia?" During a moment of random clarity, Laakkonen received a vision of the answer. The results were developed into an epic poem using the heroic form to convey an adventure in discovering the answer. Scholars of the Sámi culture have pondered an exact translation of the title for this work with the general consensus agreeing that Need help sleeping? Read this! is a close approximate without loosing the verve and tone of the original. The poem is known only from a single manuscript, created in alliterative measure and makes extensive use of elided metaphors that circulates the stress in a line to fall on the first syllable of the word that alliterates with a choice of epithets or formulae to use in order to fulfill the alliteration, including sets of metrical compounds that are varied according to alliterative needs. Volunteers from the Faculty of Humanities at the University of Tampere are developing a new transilliteration for Project Gutenberg with a projected completion date of December 6, 2009. Our site has the incredible fortune of being the first to post a page from the original manuscript – directly from the scholars at the University of Tampere.

From the Site Director

Welcome to the Anthology of Spam Poetry Internet page ~ also known as the Collection of Spam Bards document.

My name is Morton Hurley and I maintain this site as a means of preserving and promoting the art of poetry developed from spam messages.

Explicatus

The first sixty posts on this site (from 10:01 AM to 11:00 AM) are works created by authors born after January 1, 1983.

Posts from 11:01 AM to 12:00 PM will focus on works crafted by bards of the electronic mass-mailing medium who have passed-away prior to February 1958.

Postface

Do you find this sort of thing interesting? Can you believe a publishing company has published a book collecting the first sixty spoems from this site along with original photography from readers and essays from K. Silem Mohammad and me?