Tag Archives: pt heroes

Opiate-devouring Texas Gov. Rick Perry is joining his friends Bobby, Scott, Nikki, and Bat Boy in choosing to reject the federal government’s Medicaid expansion. He can do this thanks to the Supreme Court handiwork of Burkean minimalist St. John Roberts, whom all liberals must love and respect eternally for only gutting half of Obamacare for no reason. This would leave 1.3 million in Texas, a state that proudly persecutes its poor, for fun, without access to medical coverage. Read more on Rick Perry Saves Poor Texans from Scourge of Medical Care…

In addition to that eerie, pinch-faced scowl worn by anti-gay marriage wingnuts that makes them all rather less attractive in general, homophobes may soon be forced to seek out their haircuts from homophobe stylists as well. Bet there are lots of those! Popular Santa Fe stylist Antonio Darden cut the hair of New Mexico’s anti-gay marriage Republican governor Susana Martinez three times before he decided that he doesn’t approve of styling for a woman who doesn’t approve of him being able to marry his gay partner of fifteen years, so he took her off his client list. Oh well, bad haircuts are their own form of Pope-approved contraception, so wingnuts should be pleased in the end, right? Read more on Anti-Gay Marriage NM Gov. Fired From Her Gay Stylist’s Client List…

Steve Holland, Democratic Representative of Mississippi, has embraced the latest trend of taunting the powers that be with a bill proposing renaming the Gulf of Mexico the Gulf of America! H.B. 150 was introduced to Mississippi’s Marine Resources Committee this week, and it contains real words about why this is potentially actually happening (knowing Mississippi, which is a beacon of change). Fittingly, Holland doesn’t even mention the Gulf of Mexico BY NAME in ANY part of this bill, which is a mere 12 lines long. He, turning his head away in feigned disgust as he typed the words, trying hard to hold back his lunch, calls it “the body of water that is located directly south of Hancock, Harrison and Jackson Counties.” Read more on Mississippi Legislator Proposes Gulf of Mexico Be Renamed Gulf of America…

Here’s something we don’t say every day: This long, well-written profile in Bloomberg BusinessWeek is inspiring. It’s about David Graeber, “the Anti-Leader of Occupy Wall Street,” and he is just the kind of smart anthropologist that Florida criminal/governor Rick Scott must’ve been thinking about during that whole “shut down the teaching of anthropology” idiocy.
Read more on Meet the Smart Anthropologist Anarchist Who Helped Launch #OWS…

Look what’s on Facebook, oh boy. Here we have some wedding photos from the arrested Seditious Christian Michigan Militia, Hutaree, and everyone’s got a goddamn assault weapon. This is not a sustainable situation. Read more on It’s A Seditious Christian Michigan Militia Wedding!…

‘AL’ GONZALES FIXED MOST THINGS: From one of those fancy New York Esquire interviews, where it’s all answers, no questions: “This may sound egotistical, but to me it is important that when I leave this earth, I would have made a difference — that people would know Al Gonzales lived, he touched lives, he made a difference, he left a mark.” [Esquire]
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Ha, so he’s impeached now. Bad move, state legislature of Illinois! Last time people tried to take away Blago’s powers because of obvious corruption, he made a national mockery of them! Blago will become King of Illinois and head of the Royal Cavalry, in a week. Let’s see how he plays the race card this time. (Thank you for the live feed, liberal MSNBC!) Read more on Liveblogging Blago’s Latest Drug-Induced Refusal To Quit…

Here’s CNN’s coverage of the wacky Kipling-inspired Blago press conference, in which the governor of Illinois is on cocaine, lots and lots of cocaine. And for those of you who didn’t understand our constant exclamations about Rick Sanchez’s Twitter in the liveblog, well, pay attention. It is the best possible thing to happen on cable teevee, showing crazy Internet peoples’ comments during actual news events. One of the last ones sums up the hilarity: “sundaycosmetics: Are u taking story ideas fm Twitter?” [YouTube]
Read more on Blago’s Press Conference Almost As Funny As Rick Sanchez’s Twitter Updates…

Indiana has this quaint law: Robot lie calls, or “robocalls,” are illegal. So campaigns hire whole telemarketing staffs to call people and read a bunch of incendiary bullshit to people dumb enough to answer the phone when they don’t recognize the Caller ID. There are few jobs as soul-killing as telemarketing, and people could be forgiven if they just went along with it — not like there’s any other work out there. Read more on Indiana Telemarketers Walk Off Job Rather Than Read Anti-Obama Script…

Here’s Joe the Plumber on the teevee this morning with, uh, who is that, Diane Sawyer. Good Morning America. It turns out that Joe does not make $250,000 a year, or anywhere close to that, but he really does hate the idea of a progressive tax system! Do you think he knows that it EXISTS ALREADY? He wouldn’t like that Socialism none too much, mmhmm. Guy just really hates the money taxes, and that’s why he never pays them. [YouTube]
Read more on Here’s Joe The Plumber And He Hates Taxe$$$…

We all hoped he would run for vice president, with Ron Paul, or maybe run against Al Franken or something, but famous independent wrestler Jesse Ventura will instead host a teevee show about conspiracy theories. Today is just one big disappointment. [Seattle Times]
Read more on Jesse Ventura Makes Obvious Career Move…

Today, a federal grand jury indicted Alaskan Sen. Ted Stevens on seven counts of “filing false financial disclosures.” Stevens is the biggest catch in a four-year-old corruption investigation involving pretty much all Alaskan politicians, one that’s complicated not because of the crimes committed — lots of bribery, basically — but because there was so freaking much crime to investigate. His indictment comes almost exactly a year after federal agents raided his home, and now he will go to jail and lose his Senate seat and remind everyone how evil the powerful Republicans are. Read more on More On Ted Stevens Being Screwed For Life…