My best friend arrived here lateish on Thursday last week. Alarm went off right after 5am on Friday morning, taxi to the airport and off we went. Three days in snowy, rainy, windy, and cold Amsterdam. No matter how bad the weather was (December isn't the ideal time to travel there weather-wise) the city was absolutely beautiful.

Walking around, discovering endless amount of beautiful little streets and lovely, romantic canals. Christmas lights and Mariah Carey playing on loop in most of the shops. Being amazed and somewhat amused by the houses that seem to be all tilted to all directions and it appears there's no single building with straight walls in this place.

Sitting in a lovely restaurant for three hours straight, getting tipsy of the wine and feeling like adults - who would have believed our very first shared trip abroad back in 2013 would result us travelling together ever so often and being both up for the craziest ideas, spontaneous weekends in Amsterdam, and multiple nights at airports, hostels, and on the road.

Visiting Anne Frank house and a couple of museums (I recommend Museum of Prostitution to learn a a bit more about the history of Amsterdam, and Sex Museum just to get those "what the heck" moments) and skipping the Van Gogh Museum as being soaking wet already it didn't feel worthwhile to stand in the rain queuing for another hour or so. Maybe next time.

Swearing we'll both return there one day - preferably summertime - to enjoy the vibe of this lively, lovely city. Feeling a bit sad because having travelled extensively means you wont get the thrills anymore just by being at the airport. Enjoying our night there anyway, eating a lot of chocolate and laughing like never before. I love my best friend and the fact travelling with her is fun and easy.

Flying back home early on Monday morning, falling asleep even before the plane had taken off. Waking up for a bit when someone screams in the cabin - there was ridiculous amount of bumps and shaking due turbulence but I hadn't woken up to that. I guess I'm way too used to being in a plane to give a damn about little bumps. Falling back asleep and waking up again to touch the ground in the freezing city of Edinburgh.

Winter arrived to the UK while we were away, it was -7 degrees last morning, but absolutely beautiful with frost on the ground and sun shining brightly. During those three days I fell in love with Amsterdam and it's beauty, but I fell in love with Edinburgh once more yesterday. I'm happy to live in such a beautiful place and happy to be able to hop on a plane and be some place else in a couple of hours if I want to. I'm happy to be getting started with packing again.

It's 7th of December and I can call it a day and I can call it a semester. I did my last exam of the semester this morning (after enormous amount of two hours of sleep as my friend came over to my place to catch an early plane to Finland today) and it's definitely a pass so no more stress. I'm confident I did alright in all of my subjects - I'm not expecting top grades but at least I shouldn't have failed anything.

I spent the whole afternoon with my little group of friends, looking at apartments for the next autumn as that's something you really want to sort out right in the beginning of next year. We spent a couple of hours chucking the disc and then just chatting in our kitchen drinking tea (gotta love these British people always up for a cup of tea) and wondering what it will be like sharing a flat next year. Fun, I assume.

Now I sit in my room and have nothing to do. I should pack for the upcoming weekend trip and I should vacuum my room. I'm kind of hungry as well but too lazy to walk to the kitchen. I feel a bit empty and started wondering why. I'm kind of sad, I'm kind of missing this place and my friends here already. It's weird. I shouldn't sit here going through all these almost negative feelings.

I'm heading to Amsterdam tomorrow, my best friend will arrive here in an hour and a bit. It's going to be awesome couple of days with her. Back here on Monday and flying to Finland pretty much straight away on Wednesday. If nothing else, that should make me super excited and it does in a way. I haven't been to Finland for good three months now, but have I missed it yet? No, not really. Have I missed people? Yes, a bit, but not more than I would miss them if I was in Finland as well. I do miss chocolate and rye bread and I know it will be lovely to be back and I'm looking forward to seeing all of my loved ones. So I'm not saying I don't want to go home but my feelings are very mixed.

It was horrible to leave Australia behind earlier this year and I totally got that. It's my home away from home and I still don't know for sure when I'll return. But this is just a holiday, it's just three weeks, and I'm not leaving Scotland for another few years anyway. It's time to go and say hi to everyone and everything back in north. But however different this should be I recognize certain similarities between these feelings and the feelings I had when I looked the familiar roads and buildings and all these dear places, people, and memories slowly disappearing in the horizon when the plane took off from the Perth airport in WA. It doesn't really make any sense. It's just a holiday, not a goodbye.

I guess this sudden feeling of melancholy is just a good thing in a way. It means everything is fine here. It means I have good friends I will be happy to see again in a few weeks time. It means I love being here and I feel like I belong here. It means this isn't just another place to stop by but my home. It's very confusing when going home means leaving home. It's very confusing when you write in your calendar "going home" for the first day of your holiday and "back home" for the last.

And guess what? Now that I've been sitting here, writing this post, I'm starting to feel more and more excited about going to Amsterdam and be a tourist for a couple of days with my best friend, as well as about going back home to Finland. I guess my life has been so good past months that I need to balance out my emotional scales by reacting this way to such small things.

But anyway. I'm proud to call our beautiful Finland that has been independent for 100 years my home. I'm happy to be able to say I'm going home when it's time to hop on the plane to Edinburgh in January. Home is where the heart is and it can be in multiple places.

This challenge has been going around in the blogs of Finnish people living abroad for quite a while and I thought it would be a right time for me to take part as well! So without further explanations, 10+1 questions for an expat Finn aka me.

1. What's the best thing about your current country of residence? / Mikä on parasta tämän hetkisessä asuinmaassasi?

- I like living in Scotland in general and I've been more than happy here but if I need to pick just one thing I'd say the overall beauty of this place. Edinburgh is a stunning city and the views I've seen travelling to Glasgow and Aberdeen have been amazing.

- Most probably the annoying taps. You know how water comes from a single tap in most of the places in the world? Not in the UK, here you have two taps. One for hot and one for cold water and obviously they locate on the different sides of the sink. So you can decide: do you bother mixing suitable temperature in the sink, burn your hands, or freeze them? I opt for all of them depending on my mood and curse the system on regular basis.

6. Do you believe that you will move back to Finland one day? / Uskotko muuttavasi joskus takaisin Suomeen?

- Right now I don't think so. If I ever have children I will definitely seriously consider returning to Finland just because of the great education system we've got but otherwise I don't see myself coming back.

8. What was the hardest part about moving abroad? / Mikä oli vaikeinta ulkomaille muutossa?

- I've never found moving abroad particularly hard. The paper work does require some time and effort, so either that or the moment when you need to walk through the security check at the airport and wave a teary goodbye to your family members you know you'll see next time in god knows how many months.

9. Could you imagine yourself living in any other country than your current country of recidence or Finland? / Voisitko kuvitella asuvasi jossain muussa maassa kuin Suomessa tai tämänhetkisessä asuinmaassasi?

- I could easily imagine myself back in Australia. Same goes with Luxembourg and Germany that I both love judging by the few weeks I've worked in both, and I will definitely consider England as an option after I graduate.

10. What was the most memorable moment of the year 2017? / Mikä oli vuoden 2017 mieleenjäävin hetki?

- Hard to pick just one as there were so many big moments, both sad and happy. Leaving my Australian family and my grandfather passing away were both memorable in a very sad way. The whole backpacking adventure through Australia, New Zealand, and Asia was one big amazing journey. Moving to Scotland. Can't just pick one.

A chilly but sunny Saturday morning, the weather reminds me of a beautiful autumn day in Finland. I get a take-away cappuccino from one of our uni's cafes so I'll have a correct change for the day ticket in the bus. For once the traffic is smooth and we arrive to the town in no time. A bit of shopping and checking out the Christmas markets that would probably look way nicer in the evening when it's dark and all the lights are lit.

Evening of the same day and we head to an ice skating disco at a local ice rink. I haven't been skating for years but with every round I feel more and more comfortable - I didn't remember ice skating is that much fun! Back home I put ice on my ankle I sprained a few weeks ago as it hurts like hell but it was totally worth it.

As the weather's been decent and there are no more lectures for most of us, we've been throwing the frisbee around with the guys pretty much every day. I've set myself a goal of being able to throw decent long throws by the end of next semester.

Our little group (that we've been throwing that frisbee around with) gets together for cake on Tuesday as we'll be going for a Christmas dinner with the frisbee team on our usual cake night. The guys talk about razors and Movember and I tell them that yeah, I've got a lot of first hand experience of shaving my beard. Trying to solve a Rubik's cube together and fitting the four of us in one bed and throwing around a dirty sock for some weird reason. Fun times and I like those people.

I finally got my management essay results back the other day and got 70% which means I don't have to sit the exam! And that being the case it means less stress in between coming back from Amsterdam on Monday and leaving to Finland on Wednesday as the exam would have been on that Tuesday in between. And yes, I'm going to Amsterdam for a weekend! I sent my best friend a message last week, said I found cheap flights and asked if she wants to go with me. Obviously she said yes straight away (I just love that girl!) and so we're flying there in a week.

Now I'm sitting in my room, sipping my morning coffee. I went to body pump today just to find out it was cancelled and ended up doing yoga instead. Better than nothing I guess and at least I'll be running in the frisbee training in the evening. I should revise for the exams but I just find myself procrastinating. Somehow I'm in a blissful state of oblivion thinking I've got nothing to do when there's no more actual studying left and haven't really realized yet how close the exams actually are.

What is the best part about living abroad? / Mikä on upeinta ulkomailla asumisessa?
- Living abroad is simply a dream come true to me and I guess that's the best part.
- Ulkomailla asuminen on mulle toteutunut unelma, joten se kai se paras juttu on.

Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert? Oletko enemmän intovertti tai ekstrovertti?
- I would say I'm more and more extroverted the older I get even though I do enjoy being on my own as well.
- Sanoisin, että muutun enemmän ja enemmän ekstrovertiksi, mitä vanhemmaksi tulen, vaikka tykkään kyllä olla yksinänikin.

A thing, you would like to do in the future? / Joku asia, minkä haluat tulevaisuudessa toteuttaa?
- For some reason the first thing that came in my mind is a bungee jump.
- Jostain syystä benji-hyppy tuli ekana mieleen, joten sanotaan nyt sitten se.

If someone gave you 50€ right now, how would you spend it? / Jos saisit nyt 50€, mihin käyttäisit sen?
- As a poor student I have to say I would buy food
- Köyhänä opiskelijana on sanottava, että ostaisin ruokaa

A night in or a night out? / Koti-ilta vai bileilta?
- Totally depends on my mood. I love going out every now and then (or more like every week here in uni...) but I also enjoy just staying home, relaxing, and having a bit more quiet night as well
- Riippuu ihan mielentilasta. Rakasta ulkona käymistä silloin tällöin (tai oikeammin viikottain näin yliopiston myötä...), mutta nautin myös kotona olemisesta, renotutumisesta ja vähän rauhallisemmasta menosta

Which century would you like to visit? / Mille vuosituhannelle haluaisit matkustaa?
- I would probably go back to the early 20th century.- Palaisin varmaan 1900-luvun alkupuolelle.So that's it. The answers to the rest of the questions you left me a while ago - hope you enjoyed reading this post and maybe learnt something new about me!Joten siinäpä se, vastaukset loppuihin kysymyksiin, jotka kysyitte hetki sitten - toivon mukaan nautitte tän postauksen lukemisesta ja ehkäpä opitte myös jotain uutta minusta!

I asked you to leave me questions a while ago and there was a bunch of them. It's time to answer some of them as I had to divide this post into two parts to avoid it becoming too exhausting. Anyway, let's get started!

In which country have you eaten the most memorable meal ever? How about the best food ever? / Missä maassa oot syöny mieleenpainuvinta ruokaa? Entä yksinkertaisesti parasta ruokaa?
- This is a hard one as I've been eating lots of interesting and tasty foods in multiple different places. One quite a unique experience was shopping at Ramadan markets in Malaysia and having our dinner from those little plastic bags, sitting on the side of the road with a bunch of others. The food itself wasn't maybe the most memorable part of this but the experience as a whole. And the best food then? I just have no idea to be honest.
- Tähän kysymykseen on vaikea vastata, sillä olen syönyt paljon mielenkiintoisia ja maistuvia ruokia monissa eri paikoissa. Yksi erityinen kokemus oli Malesiassa Ramadan markkinoilla shoppailu, jonka jälkeen syötiin illallisemme porukalla niistä pikku muovipusseista kadulla istuen. Ruoka sinällään ei ehkä ollut niin kovin mieleenpainuvaa, mutta se koko kokemus kylläkin. Ja paras ruoka sitten? Tähän on sanottava, että en kyllä oikeasti tiedä!

How have your studies been so far? / Millai sun opiskelut on lähteny käyntiin?

- My studies have started off pretty well, I've been super busy but happy for the past two months. I'm not getting 100% on every single test but I'm doing a fairly good job and I'm happy with the results I'm getting. Independent studying does take a lot of time and effort and I'm still trying to get used to it but I like my subjects and learning new anyway

- I have to say I'm lucky and haven't really faced any actually dangerous situations while travelling and it's usually been more about being uncomfortable than actually afraid. But the first thing that comes in my mind when thinking of something that scared the hell out of me is that one night in New Zealand. We parked our rental car in which we slept in the end of a small remote road, started watching a thriller and drank some wine thinking no-one else will end up there. It was pitch black middle of nowhere (and as it's New Zealand there wasn't even phone service, so we were totally isolated of the rest of the world) and we were about to fall asleep. Suddenly another car drives behind us. I've never woken up so quickly and I remember my heart racing and us whispering in terror trying to figure out what to do (and after that movie, with some wine in our heads, we were totally convinced someone's going to murder us...). Long story short: turned out it was a couple of Swedish backpackers free-camping like us, and we ended up having a little bonfire sharing our best tips and experiences regarding travel and life in general.

The best place you just happened to visit without planning it in the first place? / Paras paikka, johon olet "eksynyt" eli et ollut suunnitellut alunperin käyväsi?
- The first place that comes to mind is Melaka in Malaysia but could mention also Cameron Highlands in the very same country. Both were pretty spontaneous visits!- Eka paikka, joka mieleen tulee on Melaka Malesiassa, mutta voisin myös mainita Cameron Highlandsin samassa maassa. Molemmat olivat aika spontaaneja visiittejä!

Have you tried couchsurfing and how was it? / Oletko couchsurfannut, millainen oli kokemuksesi jos olet?
- I have couchsurfed once in Melbourne and it was a great experience!
- Olen sohvasurffannut yhden yön verran Melbournessa ja se oli huippu kokemus!

Is there a country that many others admire but you just don't get why? / Monien ihailema maa, joka ei vaan nappaa sua? Onko sellaista?
- I could say the USA but I have to admit my opinion is based on second hand information as I've never actually been there- Tähän voisi sanoa USA, vaikka täytyy myös myöntää, että mielipiteeni pohjautuu olettamuksille, koska enhän siellä koskaan ole oikeasti käynyt

Which of the countries you've visited has stolen your heart completely? / Mikä maista, joissa oot käynyt, vei sun sydämen täysin?
- I have to list my top four: Australia, UK (England in the first place but nowadays Scotland as well), Germany, and Luxembourg- Tähän on listattava mun top nelonen: Australia, Britannia (Englanti alun alkaen, mutta nykyään myös Skotlanti), Saksa ja Luxembourg
And that's it for this time. Next time I'll answers questions related to living abroad and some other stuff you wanted to know!

Since my life in uni has found it's ways and my every day life has some routines finally, I decided I could give you a little insight on what it's like to be a student in Scotland. And what's a better way than to do a traditional "my day"! This time we're taking a look at my regular Wednesday. Let's get started, shall we?

I usually wake up sometime between 8am and 9am but it totally depends on when my lectures start and whether or not I go to the gym or to body pump in the morning - if I do, I usually set my alarm at 7. This particular Wednesday I just slept in and enjoyed the sun shining through the window while eating my breakfast in our kitchen.

German lesson from 12:15-13:15 and economics tutorial from 13:15-14:15. I've actually quite enjoyed studying German but I have to say that economics is probably my least favourite subject I've got at the moment. It could be interesting but I'm just really confused with all the graphs all the time...

A couple of hours of free time that I usually spend by getting something to eat and most weeks end up sitting in our kitchen chatting with my flatmates and occasionally some other friends as well. For some reason Wednesdays seem to be the days when a bunch of us just happen to be in the kitchen at the same time. This Wednesday I opted for my room and laptop instead until it was 4:25pm and time to head to the sports centre for the frisbee training.

The weather is definitely warmer here than in Finland but 7 degrees and rain still isn't fun. It's a short 5 minutes walk from my halls to the sports centre where we've got an indoor training every Wednesday. So just get on the boots and start throwing!

And evenings then. Sometimes I just study, sometimes I just sit on my laptop. Sometimes we go out and last Wednesday me and a couple of the guys from frisbee went for a free Wednesday meal at chaplaincy, ended up eating cake and playing drinking games at one of their flats. It was fun though and I was bed by 1am - usually I would prefer going to bed a bit earlier but every now and then you just have to go with the flow. Or maybe I just have to do it every Wednesday from now on as we were kind of planning to make that free meal + cake + some drinks a tradition of ours!

I noticed I haven't written anything here for a while again and decided to fix the situation. I have nothing overly exciting to share with you but a couple of photos from here and there and could do a little catch up with what I've been up to as well.

Let's go back in time a bit more than a week, to the Saturday before last Saturday. Me and my friend decided to spend the day in the town. I woke up early enough to go to body pump, showered, got changed and off we went. A bit of shopping and some lunch before heading to the National Museum of Scotland. If you ever visit Edinburgh that is something I highly recommend you to do - the National Museum is big and there's certainly something interesting to everyone. The entry is free (but a donation is appreciated) and you could easily spend a few hours wandering around there.

Last week I spent mainly studying. The end of the semester is approaching and in some aspects the studying is getting easier - next week there won't be any management lectures or tutorials for example - but on the other hand I should hand in my management essay in a couple of days and it still is a complete mess. It will definitely take some practice to get my skills on academic writing up to a satisfactory level...

Besides studying I've spent more than enough time playing frisbee and I have to say I really enjoy it. I think I've mentioned this sport here earlier but never really explained it properly. The thing is that I joined our school's ultimate frisbee team some three weeks ago because of my friends who wouldn't stop saying I should try it out as well. So I finally did, liked it, and here I am, attending every single available training. And why? I went and said yes for women's regionals that will take place this upcoming weekend and I really need all the practice I can get. So yes, I attended four training sessions last week. Who would have thought I'd get excited about team sports this easily?

Anyway. Last Friday I headed to the town after skipping German lesson to write my essay and getting my hands full of bruises in the afternoon's outdoor frisbee session as it was freezing cold and the disc was super hard because of it. My friend came down from Glasgow and I went to meet her at the train station. We grabbed some dinner (Let Me Eat on Grassmarket is a great place for coffee or something lighter to eat, and they've got a great variety of vegetarian and even vegan options!) and walked to the cinema. I've really wanted to see the new Thor movie and Kira was up for it too, so the plan for the rest of the night was pretty clear. The movie was entertaining but it probably isn't the best Marvel movie ever. I would still recommend it though!

Saturday and Sunday were both super relaxed: making some sushi, watching Sex and the City, and going to the town for cocktails (weirdly enough I haven't been actually going out for a couple of weeks - maybe everyone is finally getting a bit worn out by the constant partying? Just maybe?). It was time to say goodbyes on Sunday evening and after my friend was gone I found myself staring at my laptop for an hour. Realizing I'm not getting anything done studying-wise, I decided to hit the gym and it was the best decision ever. As it's dark and cold outside I've been running on the treadmill instead. I've been getting good 30-40mins in each time but yesterday I found running easy (and even my ankle that I sprained in a training a few days ago was fine) and kept going for an hour. I've never actually done a whole hour of running and that feeling afterwards was better than anything!

And well, now I'm sitting here, writing this instead of working on my above mentioned essay I should hand in this week. Or well, I did work on it for the 5 minutes my flatmate was here asking about referencing... Today's plan includes a couple of lectures and a body pump session. Maybe some studying in the library as well. I also realized there's exactly one month to go and I'll be flying to Finland for the Christmas holidays. Time really flies when you're having the time of your life.

I was having a chat with a friend of mine a couple of weeks ago. We were talking about this and that and somehow ended up discussing about a person we both know. My friend would say he's actually friends with this guy, I would say the same but we're friends in that "we hang out because we've got common friends and we have a chat because we happened to bump to each other" way. We never actually spend time together with this person and I can't see myself asking him for a cup of coffee in twenty years time for the sake of good old times. We know each other, we're kinda mates, but I wouldn't send him a message and ask him for a round pool like I could do to my "actual" friends. We might like each others facebook photos, but that's all the direct communication we have. And that's alright. Not everyone has to be my best friend.

Anyway. We were talking about this with my friend. I told him that I have a feeling this guy doesn't really like me. That I have a feeling we're kind of friends and he does talk to me and sometimes we even have a good conversation on the way to the lecture or laugh at something on the corridor. But then again he doesn't seem to like me genuinely. I'm pretty good at telling who likes me and who does not and with this guy I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm alright but there's something that isn't quite right. There's something that bothers him and there's something in me that bugs him. And I asked my friend why is it so? Why doesn't this guy like me? "Well, he doesn't like foreigners" was the reply I got.

Those are the exact words my (English) friend used and it made me think about myself - who I am, where I am from and where I am now. And yes, it's true. I am a foreigner, I am an immigrant. I am someone who left their home country to live someplace else. I've never thought it that way before now. Studying abroad, living abroad, having an international group of friends. That's all something so normal and natural to me that I never actually stopped to realize I definitely am an immigrant now. I'm that foreign girl. In our university it's nothing unusual, we've got people from all sorts of backgrounds and we were voted "the international university of the year", and every other person is an immigrant, a non UK citizen, or has moved to Scotland with their parents that are not British.

But for this guy, I'm the foreigner. I'm the one who doesn't fit in and it kind of makes sense as pretty much all of our common friends are British and if not British they've lived here for years and years with their families. It all makes sense when I think about the political views of this guys (yes, he voted yes for Brexit), it all makes sense when I think about how I feel about how he feels about me. It's probably not me as a person, as we get along alright, but it's the fact that I'm not from here and I do not belong here. And I respect his opinion even though I don't understand it.

I'm personally a very open-minded world citizen and try not to judge people based on their looks, background, or any other qualities they can't really affect. I do judge people (don't expect me to be perfect) but I try to do it based on how they behave, how they treat others, and how and what they speak. Not on where they're from, not on their looks, or not on their religious believes. I don't understand why me being from Finland, not from the UK, makes me worse off as a person in the eyes of his but that's the way it is and that's alright, kinda. I don't have to understand everything and I don't have to understand the reasoning behind people's opinions but I can still respect them. It's fine for him to be a nationalist, it's fine for him to have differing views on the world than I have. I don't understand it but it's okay. It's okay that "he doesn't like foreigners", not everyone has to. But it kind of makes me sad - a person who could like me in theory doesn't really like me because he has this attitude towards non-British people.

I'm privileged in the sense that I've never faced racism myself. Backpacking in Southeast Asia was an eyeopening experience as it was the first time in my life when I was always the one standing out from the crowd. Always the one looking different, always the one on the spotlight but 95% of the time it was just curiosity, just positive attention (which, however, doesn't change the fact it got pretty tiring pretty quickly). Anyway. I know what it's like to be the one who doesn't fit in but I don't know what facing racism feels like. But now I know what it feels like when someone has judged you before knowing anything about you. I know how it feels when you can't change someone's opinion about you just because you happen to be foreign. I know how it feels when someone has that "something" against you no matter what. And it does make me sad - not for myself but more in general. If this is how I feel, how do those people must feel like who face actual racism in their lives? How many other people in this country think that I should go back home? We all should go back home?

I'm an immigrant, I am foreign. But still I feel like I belong here and not everyone likes that. I'm not going to try to persuade this person to change his political views or his values, I see no point in that. But what I will try to do is to convince him that I'm alright even though I'm foreign. I'm alright even though I'm an immigrant. I'm alright even though I've got this weird accent. We don't have to be best friends but I would like him to realize that judging people based on their nationality isn't the way to go.

And even if "he doesn't like foreigners" I've got a bunch of friends who are fine with me coming here, living in their country, and hoping to create myself a future here. It's just interesting to notice these things and how different people have so differing mindsets. It's fascinating to realize things about yourself and about how the others perceive you. I guess it's part of the deal to get judged by certain groups of people. That, unfortunately, happens everywhere - I've seen the same happening in my hometown to my friends who were foreign there. Not everyone welcomes you but someone always does. But however it was, I'm happy right here right now. I'm happy being a foreigner who can't pronounce a tricky word making everyone laugh when trying.