When you give up the form in which you think these things must appear, you’re instead open to the miracle of them showing up all around you all the time in ways that are a lot more joyful and unexpected than you could have ever planned.

Part of our problem is we feel we have to have things lined up in a definite way before we feel like we can take the leap.

So before you can ask the girl out on a date you have to have your shit together. Or before you start auditioning you need to re-do your headshots. Or before you move to a bigger city, you have to make sure you have even more money in the bank account.

These postponements keep us stuck in the idea of the fantasy of how it’s going to look once we get there.

The irony is that you’ll never get there if you stay stuck in the idea.

There’s nothing wrong with being unsettled or doubtful or not entirely together while we’re out in the world. There’s nothing wrong with falling down as we attempt to walk. That’s how we learn.

You’re never going to have it all together. Ever. So if you keep putting your life on hold for greater perfection before you can do other things, you’ll find out you’ve postponed half your life.

If you let life show you how to participate – it will. But it requires us to get out of our heads that create so many distractions and reasons why we can’t, that we miss it entirely.

We’re all seeking a shared experience. Everyone. Not just some of us. All of us.

But we sometimes aren’t aware of this universal connection because we think we’re the only ones who desire it. So we let these opportunities pass when they come to us in the most surprising ways.

Being open to connection just means being open.

It doesn’t mean you have to fast-forward to an end-result that may require you to go on a date or commit to someone or get married (!) or say yes to a job or move to LA tomorrow. It just means letting the meaning of an experience unfold for you instead of you constantly trying to figure it out first before you decide to jump in.