12 Real Signs of True Love in a Relationship

True love is the true definition of a perfect romance. But it’s not easy to find. Do you see these 12 signs of true love in your own relationship? By Elizabeth Arthur

True love isn’t felt in a heartbeat or in a second glance.

True love takes time to take shape.

And contrary to popular belief, love at first sight isn’t really love at all.

In fact, love at first sight is nothing but an infatuation.

It’s a strong surge of romantic and sexual emotions that overwhelm you.

Before you wonder what true love is all about and what the signs of true love really are, you need to understand that it’s very important to take things slow in a relationship if you want to ensure its success.

It’s the kind of love many of us chase after, but few truly find or realize it until it’s too late. So what is true love really?

True love is the kind of love and affection you have for someone that isn’t bound by the laws of human behavior. Human behavior is simple to understand. When someone hurts you, you get angry with them. When someone gets lucky or gets a better job, you get jealous of them. And when someone shatters your ego or humiliates you, you want your revenge. This is human behavior, because these traits are engrained within us.

But when you experience true love with someone, your primal instincts and behavior change only towards this person. True love transcends typical human behavior. It makes you a better human being towards a special someone. [Read: A true story of unconditional love]

When does one experience true love?

True love takes time to bloom. What you experience in the first year or so of a relationship is infatuation and sexual attraction.

As the bursts of infatuation start to fade with the first few arguments and the first few misunderstandings, that’s when love starts to enter the picture. And this is where most couples start to drift away emotionally, or even end up breaking up because of incompatibilities.

Is true love a once in a lifetime experience? Not really. You can experience them many times over, and with many people at the same time. You can experience true love with your spouse or your lover, your children and any other person you’re attached to in your life.

But true love too, can fade with time. For most of us, our first love is the first time we would have experienced the purest form of true love. We aren’t afraid to let this special someone into our heart and we aren’t afraid to experience heartbreak because we still don’t know what heartbreak feels like. We’re fearless in love and we love passionately with all our heart. [Read: How to know if you’re in love in the infatuation stage]

But when the first romance dies, the true love we had for our first partner too eventually fades, even if it takes years and several new relationships to overcome. And as we enter more relationships, most of us split into two groups. One that believes in true romantic love and the other group that convinces itself that true love doesn’t exist. The kind of relationships you’ve had in your lifetime can play a big part in your understanding of, and expectations from, true love.

And if you’re wondering whether true love and romantic love are the same, it really isn’t, even though we almost always associate true love with romantic love. True love is love in its purest form, while romantic love needs sexual attraction to stay alive. [Read: 25 rules you need to know to have a perfect relationship]

True love can’t be forced

True love has to be experienced naturally and wholeheartedly. You can’t fake true love no matter how hard you try. If a couple fails to pass the test of compatibility in their infatuation stage, it’s pretty hard for both of them to ever experience true love.

On the other hand, if both partners can understand each other and relate to each other, they’ll start to love each other’s company and start to become inseparable. And eventually, this bond will turn into a pure and selfless love that we call true love. [Read: How to stay in love forever and keep love alive in your romance]

The 12 signs of true love in a perfect romance

True love may be hard to define, but the signs to read true love can be clearly seen in every perfect loving relationship.

If you’re in a relationship and want to know if you’re experiencing the purest form of love, use these 12 signs of true love to find out for yourself.

#1 Give and take in love. You give to the relationship wholeheartedly, without any desire or expectations of getting something back in return from your partner to justify your actions.

#2 Pure happiness. Just watching this special person smile or laugh out loud fills you with intense happiness, even if you’re suffering or having a hard day.

#3 Pain and anger. You get terribly hurt when your lover upsets you, but their actions never anger you. You may get annoyed or frustrated now and then momentarily, but you just can’t stay mad at them for long because staying mad or giving them the silent treatment hurts you more. [Read: The effective way to give someone the silent treatment in a relationship]

#4 Sacrifices. You make sacrifices for their happiness or wellbeing, even if they may never realize it.

#5 The right effort. You go to great lengths and make an effort to improve the relationship, and play a conscious part in trying to please your partner and make them feel loved and special.

#7 You keep your promises. When you make a promise to them, you stick to your word even if this person will never find out if you broke their promise. When you experience true love, your moral conscience becomes very strong when it comes to this one special person.

#8 We. In a perfect relationship, it’s good to have your own space to grow as individuals. But at the same time, if you truly love your partner, you’d see them as a part of your life. When you think of your future, you can’t help but see them by your side. [Read: How to give space in a relationship and come closer]

#9 You share their burden. And you do that even if you don’t really have to. You can’t bear to see this special someone suffering. If they’re dealing with some issue, you’re always willing to offer them a helping hand even when you have your own difficulties to look into.

#10 Pride and jealousy. You beam with pride when they achieve something, even if it’s the same thing you failed at. You may get jealous of a friend who outdid you, but when you love someone, jealousy never enters the picture.

#11 Suffering. You’d be willing to suffer, just to see them happy.

#12 Their perspective. Everything you do, you keep your lover in mind and think from their perspective, be it about planning a surprise party or hanging out with your own friends after work. You don’t ever want to hurt your lover, so you always think from their point of view before making any decision that involves them in any way.

Are you experiencing true love?

If you’re in a relationship and aren’t experiencing these true love signs, don’t fret. Perhaps, your relationship hasn’t reached the state of emotional maturity that surpasses physical attraction or the stage of infatuation.

Take your time and test the waters. You can’t fall in love with someone by forcing yourself into the relationship. If it’s not working out, try to understand each other better. And if nothing you do can bring happiness back into love, perhaps both of you would be better off dating other people. [Read: 25 things to talk about to create a truly happy relationship]

But at the same time, if both of you are already happy in the relationship, don’t try to change anything about it. Sometimes, selfless and unconditional love takes time to materialize. Remember, you can’t push yourself into the next stage in love unless both of you are ready for it.

As long as your lover and you are happy and understand each other, you’re already experiencing the perfect kind of love!

Use these 12 signs of true love to understand what true selfless love really means. And even if you’re not there yet, don’t worry about it. It’s only a matter of time before a happy romance goes the true love way!

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i like the the point that a true lover follows the partner perspective but the fact remains that sighs of true love depends on the personality involved that a lover does not keep promises or hurt you sometimes does not mean he is not your truelove maybe he or she is too carefree and that something you work on for more details visit

I am not in a relationship but I have experienced every single one of these 12 signs for one special person. Now I don’t know what I am supposed to do, I mean am I definitely in love with him? This is confusing. But a nice read

Overall like this article, though have a couple of things to add:
1. true love is to have the beloved’s best interest at heart and act accordingly; and
2. true love is to have God at the centre of the relationship and pray often.

Hey guys To Annie, that is just absolutely great to hear, I am so happy for you because I can only imagine how great your relationship must be. I have always believed that being loved by someone is already a great feeling, but being able to love someone truly in this way is the greatest feeling ever. I feel this true love for a certain girl for the past three years. Unfortunately, we are not together, and I don’t think she’ll ever feel this way about me, so it’s like the article says, you suffer just to see that person happy. I know she is happy with the other guy she is with and because I love her, I have to accept that. I would never do anything to hurt her, she is so special to me. The twelve signs listed above are spot on, this is exactly how it is for me when I think about this girl. I just wish we could be together that I could give her this love, it really eats me up inside to know that I will probably never be with her. Reading this article just confirmed it for me, that I indeed truly love her with my whole being. For a long time I thought that I was just convincing myself or looking, hoping for something that didn’t exist between me and her. At least, now I know I was not delusional. I have never before felt like this about someone, and I know with all my heart that I will never ever feel this way about anybody else in the future. I still used to speak to her a year or two ago and when she told me how things were going in her life and how happy she was with her new job, it just gave me such a great feeling inside to know how well things were going with her. We were always good friends, but I kind of knew that she would never see me as more than just a friend. This is what is so heartbreaking for me, and about a year ago I messed it all up because I told her that I secretly loved her all along, and now she doesn’t want to talk to me anymore. I know that she has someone else in her life, and it’s so hard to accept that, but I do, because I love her too much to disrupt her life. I just want her life to be perfect, and if that’s with someone else then I have to accept that. So, here I sit and suffer in silence, but I don’t care. I also do not seek somebody else for myself, because I could never do that to a girl – knowing I truly love someone else whilst having a relationship with her. I know that I will never love any other girl as much as I love this girl. I just wish it could be different. It is truly just pure hell not to be able to love this person directly, almost like not being allowed to do so.

Hay, god has nothing to do with your relationship with someone. Thats dumb. I mean, why the hell would you pray for your relationship with someone to someone whom it doesnt concern? Also, people can be in relationships and have different interests. My girlfriend has an interest in baking and music while i have an interest in parkour and music. I dont see why you would try to get god (if he exists) to make you love each other, when if you already do love each other wouldnt need help to do so. Else it would just suck. You shouldnt need help to love someone from some almighty sexist god (if youre christian (seriously, it says in the bible that women are second to men)).

Hey there. To the person above^^^. I know it looks like the bible says women are second to men, but that’s not true. A man and his woman are like One, once the two form a bond in Love. A “wife” is second to a “husband”, but it must be understood this does not imply anything about the gender. A man can be a “wife” if he desires something that is his master at the same time – e.g. money. A man and woman (e.g. Adam and Eve) were one unit, until they had “knowlegde” and they realised they were “naked”. This is akin to a woman realising she might have shortcomings in a marriage and essentially become the man’s slave, trying her best to impress him and keep him interested in her. She is then a “wife” to her “husband”. She gives him power over her and he knows it. At this point normally true love no longer exists in the relationship unfortunately.

I agree with all the things up there. It’s interesting to read that you can’t force. No you can’t. Everything just fell into place- at least in my perspective. It has left me confused but I relate to everything in this article.
I fell hopelessly and indeed is my true love. It’s too bad he doesn’t know it and if he does we can’t do anything about it.

Hey Adrian you talk the truth man, the feeling is mutual dear I can say I know how feel but everything will pass you know with GOD everything is possible it shall come to an end dear don’t worry soon you will forget about everything. But hey right am inloooove with the great man to me he’s a blessing in disguise and I always thank GOD for bringing him into my life. Trust me dear you will be fine.

I really love this writeup believing I will find a man to really love in tye nearest future…and most importantly, someone who will love me more. one sided love is the worst feeling ever as described by adrian…and I never wish that for my enemy.,so Adrian, wake up dear.,Love is also a decision, change your mindset and believe you can love another person better, you will find out you will and you will enjoy a fulfilled relationship. so, wakeup dearie’ its only one life, you also need to enjoy- God helping you.

I loved her bt at last we broke.. I am very alone so what should I do now need some help.. if any one can.. I want to talk with someone abt every thing so I can feel a little light from my inside.. its like curse for me when she said u will never found true love I ur life.. I am so depressed and frustrated.. I cant foget what she said to me that really hurts still. Btw jus want to say abt what I feel so I did.. now God can help me out.. Good bye frnds I thik its enough now.. other whise I will again picture her and then get angry..

too good to get to learn about things which lovers tend to ignore in a relationship.But i have a problem and i request to get a feed back. The problem is,The girl i think am in love with, who all the time shows me signs of affection, has anoher guy, so at times wonder why she ever let me fall for her when she knew that she had a boy friend. This pisses me off to an extent that i feel betrayed. How can i control my anger when am with her?

I read this article with tears in my eyes. Every single word in all of this seems to explain who I am and how I feel about my boyfriend. Last week was our two year anniversary, and I cannot feel more happy with him. We can spend days simply lying around watching movies and laughing and I can wish for nothing more in those moments. We also moved in together this year. However, I’m lost. I’m in utter pain and I don’t know what to do.
Three weeks ago, he told me that he didn’t know what he felt for me now, that he wasn’t sure he had those feelings anymore. I have thought about this in a thousand ways, but every time I am away from him, not seeing him makes me shake, cry and physically clutch my chest. I can’t even sleep in the torture of waiting for him to figure out what he feels. When this happens, I decide to confront him, force him to end my torture even if it means breaking up with me because I can’t stand to see him kiss me with that undescribable look in his eyes anymore. And yet every time I see him, ready to ask him again, I get a sudden burst of hope, of willpower that makes me do anything in my power to make him feel better, to make him feel that love that once made him so happy. He says he truly does not know what he feels, he can’t make a decision. A few months ago we felt the same way about each other, now I am lost and we are both suffering. I need help, but I can’t find an answer to my question. The thought of not having him in my life anymore is more painfull than anything I’ve ever known. So to anyone out there who bothered to read all this: Should I let him go and end his guilt at making me wait (knowing that he is still unsure – this could go both ways), even if it feels like my heart will physically tear?

To those who wrote above about anger: I cannot fathom being angry at my loved one, if such a situation happens to me, I am filled with immense, unrevocable sadness, and my heart litterally feels like it is tearing apart. If you are angry with or at your loved one, then I think that somehow, you have fallen out of love and are only hanging on to threads of what you used to feel. But in all honesty, I suppose I still know nothing of life and cannot lecture you, I only wish you all good luck and true happiness.

I’m experiencing all of those signs towards my ex boyfriend. I love him and I thought he was my soulmate. I’ve found him sad and crying bc he was going to miss me. But as soon as we got back together he started to treat me mean and harsh again. I claims to have those ^^steps too but doesnt come to me and show it. am i just a helpless romantic?

I loved her bt at last we broke.. I am very alone so what should I do now need some help.. if any one can.. I want to talk with someone abt every thing so I can feel a little light from my inside.. its like curse for me when she said u will never found true love I ur life.. I am so depressed and frustrated.. I cant foget what she said to me that really hurts still. Btw jus want to say abt what I feel so I did.. now God can help me out.. Good bye frnds I thik its enough now.. other whise I will again picture her and then get angry..

Hmmm. Nice write up. All happening to me in my relationship. Am happy am in love bbut Mmy partner doesn’t like to see me hanging out wiv male friend or have any as a friend. Dat use to bring quarells among us. Pls I need help on that.

i just have to comment on this article because its completelky wrong and not true is a few ways but to explain to you why is wrong i will first tell you a litle bit about my life and maybe you will understand it more, lets just say all my life i have been with over 100′ s of woman been maried 3 times 1 marrige was just pure mistake the other two woman that i spend years with and got to know personaly both meant a lot to me at first but both marrige failed now you could say is me but put it like this in time that love faded, oen marige lasted 2 years the other 7 years int he end we both new their was nothgin to feel this is the type of love you feel when you get to know a person and they become oart of your life this love is not real and will not last if you dotn bealive me look around how many marriges fail and how many marriges wish they nevr even maried int he first place most of them, you rarely hear a marrige that lastd a life time. now let me tell you what is true love, if you dotn bealive in love at first sight than you nerv experience true love this is the real one not like this article claims, why you maybe this is just me just a logn time ago back in highschool i have always been mix in numerous relationships but one day out of no were there was this girl i remember sitting at the front table of the class and i decided to look in front of me , than i notice her, i saw her smile , and for a moment everythign stop everythign i was, everything i new did’nt matter, my galavanting skills dissapear, all out of the sudden this girl whom i never meet or know anythign about became everything in my life, for days i was unable to tell her , i was surprise since i did’nt belive is such a thign as love, and i became a coward, scare of askign this one girl out but eventually i did. and very lucky was i she felt the same way it lasted but life separated us i wish not to include the unfortunate reason to why i was not able to see her ever again but i never forgot about it, im 96 now, and maybe my previous marriges did not work cause of her but one thign i do know is that the love i felt for her was my biggest purpose in live and after 79 years since i felt in love with her i can still look at this one picture and feel the same deep feeling. so bealive in love at first sight its the real one, you can fall in love with anybody you want if you get to know them abut that type of love always fades and never last for ever.but true love not all of us will find this one.

Love n love marriage batter whan both are no any doubts n think each other wrong.u can live happy n enjoy n care n share each other if u both true love in true heart any with out doubts.but now generations problams bcz all are doubts bcz of social networks.

Relate a lot to my love story .we truely madly derply love each .whant to spend the restof our lives together but her parents are obstructing .seems they are looking for a highly wealthy buisnessman…and will keep her for the higest bidder….sad but true

This is a very good article . I am writing this response with tears running down my eyes I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday. We were in a relation for 4 years. I HV been in a rltn bfr and tht boy cheated on me . my boyfriend also had a rltn bfr in which the girl cheated on him . Both of us hadn’t believed in luv from then until we met. We were very good friends and slowly started forming feelings fr each other we NVR proposed to each other . We knew that we luvd each other and we became a couple just lyk tht . He was the one hu showed me wat luv was all about. Eventhough there were some rumours abt me lyk I was a flirt and all he trusted me and stood with me all these years. Bt a simple fyt led to the break up and its really unbearable.I talked a little too much and he doesn’t even want to tlk to me now. I luv him and it is too tuf to smyl wen its burning inside . I can never love any1 as much as I luved him