Lesbian love for sale

The Sun – News: Melanie loves Becky (8 Dec): Page stunners Becky Rule and Melanie Boorman have something to tell their millions of male fans today: They are in love – with each other. The gorgeous pair are the first in Page 3’s 35-year history to fall for another topless babe. They sealed their blossoming romance during a recent Sun photoshoot on Majorca. And from now on, they will appear TOGETHER on Britain’s favourite glamour page.

The Sun – News: Page 3 lovers’ first romp (9 Dec): Lovestruck Page 3 beauties Becky Rule and Melanie Boorman have lifted the lid on their first night of lesbian lust with each other. The busty pair got it on during a baking hot night in Majorca. They shared a hotel room on the Spanish island during a Page 3 modelling job with four other babes. But it took a few glasses of wine before the pair – who first met just two weeks before – finally plucked up the courage to reveal their true feelings. Becky, 24, said: “All us Page 3 girls went for a meal on the second night of the trip. Mel and I spent the whole time flirting. She kept telling me I was her perfect woman. “When we got back to our hotel she threw off her clothes before diving naked into the swimming pool. I was so excited – I just stripped and jumped in after her.” The girls then chatted naked in a Jacuzzi with two other Page 3 babes – before Becky and Mel collapsed into bed. Mel, 23, said: “We pushed our beds together and shared our first kiss. Then we spent the night together. It was sensual, erotic, beautiful and fun.” Becky added: “When we got back to our hotel room after flirting in the Jacuzzi we took one look at each other and pushed our single beds together. That was when I knew for sure we both wanted to make love to each other. Both of us were topless and we jumped under the sheets to kiss and cuddle. But then I just couldn’t keep my hands off Mel. I kissed and stroked her breasts and she ran her fingers up and down my back. Then I slowly teased off her g-string and kissed her all over her body. Both of us were just so hot for each other. I felt like I was going to explode with desire.” Mel, a former secretary, added: “What started off as a cuddle became much more. We just wanted each other badly. Our first night as lovers was perfect. I just couldn’t get enough of Becky. When we woke up the following morning I turned to her and said, ‘Let’s just stay in bed all day and only get up to order pizza.’ I was so happy.” But the girls’ budding relationship took a turn – as Mel worried what her 27-year-old boyfriend would think about her new love. She said: “Blokes always say that girl-on-girl action is their fantasy – but when it involves their girlfriend they’re not always so keen. I didn’t want him to think I had cheated on him and so told him about my feelings for Becky straight away. It was tough to begin with – but he has now accepted our relationship. I’m so lucky that my man understands how special she is to me.”

Blimey! Can you hear that sound? That, ladies and gentlemen, is the sound of over 2 million pairs of trousers exploding in near-unison.

1. Links involve NSFW images.

2. I love that it’s ‘news’, don’t you?

3. The picture on the 2nd article is cleverly captioned ‘Les be friends’…

4. By ‘Virginia Wheeler’? Pull the other one! This has obviously been written by Alastair Campbell.

5. I am absolutely certain that this is the first time in 35 years of Page 3 that models have taken part in hot girl-on-girl action… be it sincere, implied or so explicit that it would make a gynaecologist blush (see: Rebekah Parmar Teasdale).

6. I am equally certain that this is true love.

7. Becky Rule… now why do I remember that name? Ah, yes. Got it. In January 2004 (14, 15, 16), Rebekah Wade managed to convince this girl to change her name to ‘Clare Short‘.

Still, I have no doubts about Becky Rule’sClare Short’s Becky Rule’s integrity… I only mention this particular incident because I still have Becky’s mobile phone number.

UPDATE (23 Dec) – Pandora: The Sun editor Rebekah Wade – who celebrated Elton John’s nuptials with the headline “Elton takes David up the aisle” – takes a keen interest in the gay rights movement. Last week, her newspaper included a pair of “lesbian” Page Three girls, Melanie and Becky, who are supposed to be contemplating marriage. Not everyone was convinced, though. Indeed, one grizzled hack quizzed Wade about the matter at fellow editor Andy Coulson’s Christmas bash on Wednesday. “A colleague told Rebekah he didn’t think they’re really lesbians,” I’m told. “He’d spent the day going through all the pictures of the lesbians getting married, and said none of them look remotely like Melanie and Becky.” Wade stood doggedly by her story. “She insisted Melanie and Becky were planning on a civil partnership very soon, but admitted there had been a slight problem, because one of the lesbians’ boyfriends was objecting.” (via)

UPDATE (July 28, 2007) – The Sun Page 3’s Becky and Mel split!: Bisexual babes Becky Rule and Melanie Boorman are splitting up – because Mel is marrying a lucky fella. But Becky doesn’t mind too much and will even be bridesmaid. She said: “Mel’s found a wonderful man called James and they are getting hitched next September.”

3 Responses to "Lesbian love for sale"

Lucy Pinder and Michelle Marsh have successfully worked the ‘one blonde/one brunette/we love each other’ thing for about 18 months now, and were for a while the 110% guaranteed copy-sales shifters of Loaded, Nuts and Zoo, plus they also worked very well for the Star and the Sun. Recently though they have started shifting fewer units.Their USPs are the large and allegedly natural chests that both girls have, and Michelle’s brassy professionalism compared to Lucy’s more demure girl-next-door image -Lucy has made a feature of the fact that she will not reveal her nipples. ( This is a particularly smart move. And Lucy’s secret boyfriend was always keen that she didn’t do it.) The models always pose in faux-lesbian clinches – what the men’s mags call ‘the girl bra’ is their setpiece, which is where one model cups the breasts of the other to cover the nipples and lift the bust. Sitting opposite each other withg breasts pressed together ( so nipples don’t show) and legs draped over each other is also wildly popular. They have done hundreds and hundreds of shoots working these same poses and have worked flat out to cpaitalise on their popularity.Lucy and Michelle have been adept at managing the media frenzy and Lucy has so far not revealed her nipples – but the frenzied interest in when she will do so is waning, readers have begun to move on and the cycle is nearing its close. Lucy and Michelle are not of course, real lesbians, though for a while they hilariously published a weekly ‘ housemates photo love diary’ in Nuts, depicting them lovingly washing each others’ hair, ironing in their knickers and romping on sofas in tiny shorts. The fact that it was shot in a completely different flat each week didn’t seem to be noticed by the readersThere’s a constant shortage of ‘new girls’ who are prepared to pose nude or semi-nude for the lad mags and tabloids, and the successful moidels become old hat or too expensive /over-exposed after a while so the papers and magazines will take care to generate new product.All this is a long preamble to pointing out that Becky and Mel seem to be rather too conveniently perfect material -one blonde, one brunette!BOTH will show nipples!both claim to be REAL lesbians!They have left it a bit late though; they should have done this 3 -4 months ago, then they could have hammered the Christmas calendar market and the pre-Xmas editions of the men’s monthlies.Still, nice work ladies. I predict Nuts/Zoo bidding war, Loaded cover DVD in April on sale March and about ?30k each by Valentine’s day.Valentine’s Day of course should be a REAL money-spinner…but lordy chaps, calm down, you are being expertly manipulated like puppets, milked like muppets and I claim my five pounds.

I know you know that btw. About Page 3 cynical manupulative idiocy shockah. But I had to get it, erm, off my chest. That’s what years of working in ‘men’s media’ does to one. Makes me screetch in newsagents and rant on other people’s blogs MEN WHY ARE YOU ALLOWING YOURSELVES TO BE TREATED LIKE DROOLING HALF WITS?

Typekey finally let’s me sign in.Rachel? We’re blokes. Pretty.Admittedly, that sort of blatent stupidity isn’t going to get me buying the Sun, but still. Pretty.Case in point. I don’t buy lad’s mags. I’m happy to buy pron, and have no interest in celebrity culture and barely know who “pretty girl of the minute” is most of the time. But I’ve bought this month’s Maxim. I hate Maxim, with a passion, it’s one of the worst.But, y’see, Jessica Alba poster. Pretty. A moment of weakness.Alternately, it’s perfectly rational behaviour within a functioning marketplace. We (well, I assume) know we’re being conned and it’s not for real, it’s all fantasy. But it’s a nice fantasy. We could spend the money on other things. Clothes? Hair cut? Nah…Expressed preferences within a functioning marketplace. Mr Worstall would approve. Even dodgy lefties like me can explain ourselves.Pretty.