During a recent conversation with a
friend, we talked about how it sometimes seems that we’ve hit all of the
“firsts” in life and how that can be difficult sometimes.

The first 40 years are full of firsts:
first day of school, first kiss, first love, first car, first apartment, first
job, first (and if you’re lucky only) marriage, maybe first baby. So many
things to look forward to and then you hit this point in life and wonder, what
is there to look forward to? What are the next firsts? And that lack of firsts
brings a nostalgia and sadness to it. What are we supposed to do with the rest
of our years?

As I was pondering this today, I
realized that maybe the key to happiness in aging is letting go of the need for
firsts. Think about it. Children always want to be first—first in line, first
to open presents. It’s all about me, me, me.

Maybe true adulthood happens when you
stop feeling the need for firsts that revolve around you and start enjoying the
simpler kind of firsts. First snowfall of the year, first flowers of spring,
first cup of coffee in the morning (my favorite), first bite of a hot fudge
brownie sundae, first time you travel to a new place.

Taken by themselves, these firsts
aren’t quite as momentous as the big milestones in life. Taken together,
though, they fill in the gaps between milestones, and maybe as we get older we
realize that these are the firsts that make our everyday lives rich.

Comments

Seeing a new grand baby for the first time. Watching them experience the first things in their lives.

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About me

I’m a 40-year-old woman with a darling young daughter, a long-term marriage and an established career. To onlookers, I have it all together. But in rare moments when I'm solo in the car and a throwback song comes on the radio, I sometimes have an overwhelming urge to drink myself silly, dance my ass off and make-out with strangers.
Read more...I’m not that young or foolish any more, but I also don’t feel old (despite increasing wrinkles). I am caught somewhere between young and old and I’m not the only one. This blog is for those of us who are still dancing queens yet, rather than yearning for the good old days, are wise enough to recognize that this crazy, in-between, complex time in our lives is life’s sweet spot.
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