Al Murray, pub landlord comedian and now wannabe MP for Fukp (that's the Freedom UK Party), joked that "Second place would be a miracle, first place would be deserved" arriving in the constituency this evening.

On winning, he said "Maybe if the one per cent vote for me, and we all know the one per cent rule the world, and if they vote for me then I'm obviously in touch with the people who rule the world - job done."

"I knocked on people's doors mate" he told the waiting press.

Asked what he thought of speculation that Ukip leader Farage wouldn't win the seat, Murray said: "Well then we're all walking with history aren't we. I've got the hand of history on my shoulder then."