Thursday, August 01, 2013

No Chores In This House

My children do not have chores. {gasp} I know, I know. What
kind of mother doesn’t give her children a list of chores? And she calls
herself a homeschooler?!

I believe God has placed these children in my care so that I
can prepare them to go into the world and live successful lives that are
pleasing to our Lord. As a homeowner I am responsible for the upkeep of my
home. I am also responsible for caring for myself, my children and our
possessions. And I don’t receive any reward for doing these things in a timely
manner or a job well done. This is the attitude Brad and I are preparing our
children to have in the future. So why not start it now?

Laundry is a big deal in our home. With seven family
members, linens and cloth diapers, I wash at least one load a day. But I know a
lot of large families wash everything on one day and fold another day. Other
homes set up a weekly schedule where each member of their family has one day
for all of their wash. Those plans do not work for me and my personal quirks. Also,
I don’t take care of all the laundry on my own.

Around Bookworm’s second birthday she started helping with
the laundry. Cruel and unusual punishment? No. She wanted to help! Children
love helping and I am under the impression that somewhere along the way our forcing
them into the submission of chores squashes that God-given desire to help.

At the age of two I taught her how to match and fold Brad’s
socks. That was her tiny responsibility perfect for her tiny self. There were
days she didn’t want to help or the pile was bigger than her attention span. I
would finish for her on those days. I wanted to keep her time helping a
positive experience. When she was three I had her fold washcloths. When she was
only folding Brad’s socks I didn’t mind if they were messy. I would stuff them
in his drawer and I wouldn’t see them again. That didn’t bother the
perfectionist in me. The washcloths were a different story. I had to restrain
myself from “fixing” her work. I know that her taking ownership of folding those
washcloths and the sense of accomplishment she had were important. After a few
months her folding skills improved tremendously. She was proud of herself and
her work. And I was proud of the work ethic she was building at this young age.

Little by little I added more laundry to her requirements
and by age four Bookworm was folding her own laundry. She was contributing to
the family work that keeps our home running smoothly. She has been helping me
sort laundry for years now and loves when I let her add the soap and push all
the buttons to start a load of laundry all on her own. Days have come more
times than I care to remember when she fights us to fold her laundry. The whining
and complaining is enough to make me start thinking it would be easier to fold
the laundry myself. But I know the end result is worth the fight. When she
leaves our home to live on her own she will know how to sort, wash and fold
laundry. We will not have a last minute scramble to teach her these basic
skills on her way out our front door.

Practically Speaking

Is there housework in your home that you and your family resent? Take a step back. Can you redesign that chore? Stop working for your chores;make them work for you. What expectations do you have in your family to
keep your home in order?

Andi and Brad have been married since 2002. They have five squishers who keep them on their toes. She is a second generation home educator. In her spare time Andi creates and sells handmade goodies in her shop, Andi Gould Designs.

4 comments:

Because I was a single mom I needed my children's help. They often wanted to serve and so it worked for all of us. There were times I made them do things like fold laundry and help pick up. I think there needs to be a balance and forcing any issue can deter us away from wanting to help our family. We've discovered chores that each child is good at and likes to do and then we let them take over. Sometimes we switch it up so we all understand what it takes to run our home.

I think each family is unique and the expectations must be taken into account for your goals and desires of how you want your household to operate!

My son will be 2 at the end of this year. He doesn't have "chores" but I do have a few expectations of him. He puts his dishes in the sink when he's done eating. He cleans up his toys before we start our bedtime routine. He doesn't always want to do it but I'm always there to help.

Last week I gave him my duster and showed him how to dust by base boards =) Was it perfect? Nope! Or when he wants to put away his folded laundry- he just gathers them up and stuffs them in his drawers. They don't stay folded or organized. But he loves to help and contribute and that's what I'll always encourage.