I dunno what to call this fetish, gender-bend is not entirely accurate, I guess gender-swap is good enough for it.

Ever since I was a kid, I remember getting erections from watching TV shows and movies with male-to-female body swapping scenarios. And to this day, nothing triggers my sex drive like the thought of being in a chick's body, feeling the weight of breasts on my chest, the altered way of thinking due to estrogen production in the brain, along with the incomprehensible notion of having a vagina.

I don't think the term "crossdressing" is accurate for this fetish, because it isn't the feminine clothes that turn me on, but rather, assuming the nuances of the female body. I often jerk it while a tight shirt over a bra stuffed with water balloons. I don't even need pictures to fully stimulate me. Only thinking of the particular female in mind.. being her, with the sufficient imagination to fuel the fantasy and changing process is all that's necessary, and is what fulfills me.

I'm 100% sure on the fact this isn't an issue of gender identity. I really don't identify with the opposite sex, have no desire for men, hate shopping for clothes, composer/lead guitar for a prog metal band, majority of friends are male, and despise cheesy, generic mainstream pop/rock music. As far as I know though, I have no desire for sex. The thought of being a sexy chick with all of my personality and male traits intact is purely the philosophy of this fetish.

I occasionally think of what would happen when/if total gender/DNA/chromosome re-assignment became possible. I never once considered our current technology for this, mainly because its laughably incomplete, permanent, doesn't change brain chemistry, and when you look in the mirror, you can see what used to be you, and its rather obvious as well. It'd have to be a complete erasure of my outer-shell, but it appears the sexual animal in me is the only part of me who wants this, funnily enough, permanently as well. Once the fetish delusions are flushed away after orgasm, I feel satisfied enough with my own body, and wouldn't want to be stuck as a female after all.

Its just strange. I don't know many fetishes where you fantasize of becoming the fetish. Interestingly, I feel it would have dire consequences were it to be physically achieved. I'm sure if such technology were developed, I would be helpless to resist the urge to fully utilize it for myself.

If the change was indeed permanent, I wonder how I would react to the perpetual attainment of my fetish... a fulfillment with no end in sight. For a sexual, it'd be like constantly screwing a chick, but it'd all be in your head, though telling the difference would be impossible. Rationally speaking, I'd prefer to be a woman for a day, maybe a few. Though conjecture, I postulate that a permanent change would very likely drive me into insanity, my mind would fall apart from this frightening anomaly of desire gratifcation. As the primal, subconscious urge for procreation never ceases, I would always want to go back into the body of a female. Thus, mental instability would become my new destiny.

I don't think any TL;DR besides "wanna be a chick" can sum this up, it won't hurt to read a little bit. I didn't think there would be this much to say, though it feels great to finally get it off my chest a little bit. Just a normal fetish statement wouldn't portray everything I have to say about it. Are there any groups/websites to be found with people sharing this fetish?

I signed up to reply to this, just to say that I have the very same Fetish as you and have lived with it for over 15 years (ever since my mid-teens). It's extremely unhelpful when people suggest cross-dressing, or getting a sex-change as that is not the answer.

Just be comfortable with it and rest assured that you are not alone. There are whole internet communities devoted to this, the idea of becoming a woman. It is often referred to as Transgender (TG) fetish.

Mostly these communities manifest themselves in Fiction websites. We can't actually become women, but we can write stories about it, read stories about it and fantasize about it.

These are full of stories about guys becoming girls (and I've written a couple myself).

Also you might want to consider online roleplay.

Just a word of warning though, these websites feature explicit content and often will involve the transformed character having sex as a woman. You said you don't have the desire to have sex as a woman, so thought I better mention it. For me, my fetish started with my wanting to be a lesbian and later became a desire to have heterosexual sex as a woman.

Get out of your head and go talk to a therapist. Be persistant until you find one you really jive with. Talking about it is the best thing I ever did and not as hard as you imagine. I didn't want to stop the fantasy either because it felt so good and I was hooked on the TG literature too which I'm going to say typically is like porn or a Lifetime movie - predictably formulaic and poorly written - but not always... trying to think of an example... Well, who watches porn as high art anyway. So yes, therapy helped and even though I went in not wanting to stop the fantasy (I just wanted to understand it more) I found that the more I worked on loving and accepting myself, the less I needed or even wanted to indulge it.

I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with the fantasy itself, it is how much time you spend in it and if it detracts from enjoyment of your life. For me it was an addiction - fun and kind of avant garde at first, like pot and alcohol but it soon became a total drag, unhealthy and destructive. Speaking of drag, I now understand why they call it that; don't start crossdressing, it's a damned rabbit hole that is near impossible to crawl out of but I did finally did it.

I have the exact same thing this may sound weird and crazy but I've tried almost every thing to change myself into a girl without surgery the way I deal with it is to read a bunch of erotica and anime and basically everything with a guy turning into a sexy girl all you can really do is hope

I know you wrote this four years ago, but I still wanted to reply. This simply bcs I could've written every single word of your piece myself. I've discovered the details of this fetish throughout the years, but I've been like this since I was a kid (now a young adult).

As for pootispow, there are many ways to find these kind of transformation on the internet. Not just the animes, games and (as you've probably also seen) some movies in which guys swap bodies/transform, and become women. There are also captions (tg captions) and comics (tg comics - several sites - also deviantart). Besides, there are many (primitive) games on sites like TFGamesSite.com,

I often have similar feelings and didn't know if anyone else felt that way. I'm a female tho. I love being a female. I'm openly bisexual. Been with men and women, prefer men and relationships with men. I enjoy having sex with men. But when I'm alone I often find myself fantasizing about being a particular male, what turns that particular man on and take my dildo and put it on my clit. N now it looks like I have a cock, so instead of using my dildo by fucking myself it looks like I'm jerking off. N whatever that guy I'm thinking of would do to get off, I do it until I get off too. But that's where it ends. I don't ever wanna fuck him as a guy. I don't wanna be a guy. It's weird.

I fantasize a lot about swapping bodies with an attractive woman. It definitely arouses me. I see there are others here both male and female who also fantasize about swapping bodies with the opposite sex. I would like to converse with all of you about the subject. Please leave a contact e mail address and I will get back to you ASAP. Thank you.