Hakuna Matata

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Inseparable Insanity

Everyone has those friends who are inseparable from someone or something. And everyone, in my experience, is guilty of being that person every now and then too. We all have been at dinner and there’s the one person who is constantly on their phone. I’ve been that person numerous times. I’ve tried to cut back on it a lot, especially during meals. But not everyone even realizes they’re being rude (at the very least, I know I’m being inconsiderate). It’s irritating. Yes, sometimes there’s that important message or call that you have to make, but when you’re skimming through facebook or playing a game while you’re waiting for food or whatever, it’s like… “Uhm, hello???” Like I said, we all can be guilty of it, but the more and more I try to resist being on my phone, the more I’ve been noticing other people are even worse than I was. It’s crazy.

Then there are those people that can’t be seen without their significant other. OK. I get it when you first start dating someone and all you want to do is spend time with them. But seriously? Self control people! Sometimes I don’t want to see you and your attached at the hip boyfriend, I want to just spend time with you! Even if the boyfriend is my friend or whatever. Because your girlfriend has to go to work doesn’t mean you can’t come. But apparently it does. One of my best friends has been dating someone for about two months. In that period of time, I’ve seen him about five times. All but one of those times was just him and myself. Thank you! See, that’s what I’m talking about! His girlfriend is awesome and I enjoy hanging out with her too, but it’s so refreshing that they don’t HAVE to be with each other every second of the day. I’ve spent time with just her too. There was no never ending texting conversation in that time or constant chatter about the other person. They have lives outside of each other even though they are together. These people have it right! Learn from this, fellow readers.

Even in my own relationships, I’m sorry, but I don’t want to be around my boyfriend 24/7. Sometimes, yes – obviously I enjoy his company if we’re dating. But I honestly don’t think there’s anyone I’d want to be around all the time without wanting to kill them after a while. Absence is healthy. I’m not saying you have to be alone, but a dose of time apart from your loved one is GOOD for your relationship! Go hang out with those people you were always with before you met “the love of your life” who you commonly referred to as friends and people you couldn’t live without. They miss just yoU! I’m also not saying to never combine the groups, but balance people. Balance!

It’s not just significant others either though. Siblings and best friends can get like this too. “I can’t go because my sister has a doctor’s appointment.” That’s understandable if you already agreed to give your sister a ride to the doctor or whatever. But when your sister is thirty and has a slight cold, I’m sorry, but how does this have any bearing on whether or not you can make an event? In the three hours MAX to eat dinner with a group, she’s going to spontaneously combust without you there by her side? “I don’t feel good” somehow translates to your “best” friend being unable to attend a trip that’s been planned for the past three months? I know I’m jumping around here, but I can’t be the only who deals with these excuses!

Most of my fencing team from high school is still pretty close. There’s about six of us that still communicate on a rather frequent basis. And we like to do things together. But lets face it. Between work and family and school and you know, life, getting six people with completely different schedules together is insanity. Especially last minute. So if I want to do something with all of them, advance planning is a must. But of course there’s that whole life thing that gets in the way. Suzie’s grandfather showed up out of the blue for the week so she can’t come to the weekend we planned skiing that cost us $500 each and no refund available. This is sad. Unfortunate that she can’t come. But then Maria can’t go either because she feels bad that Suzie can’t come. I love them all and of course I want them all to come, but really? Then there’s the ‘I’m in town for the weekend.’ Usually it’s a last minute thing and nothing was planned. So I send out some kind of communication deal that’s all “I’m going to this place at this time and hope you can show up.” Somehow that becomes an upheaval of but so and so can’t make it then and so and so has this after and this and that and the other thing. I realize not everyone can make it work all the time, but not EVERYONE has to ALWAYS be there. Yes it’s nice if they are, but again, life and all. Will it really be that bad if you go with the rest of us? Will you really have a better time being at home because whatever? The names and specifics are obviously completely made up, but the principle and idea behind it is legit.

Anyhow, I think this rant has gotten the point across. If you’re one of these people that I’m talking about here, be aware of it. And change it. At least make an attempt. Your friends will appreciate it too! 🙂