Wednesday, November 19, 2008

This past Sunday there was a scheduled prop 8 protest outside of our church building. Many church members were a little worried and very cautious. It actually turned out to be a peaceful "silent" protest and there were only about 50 people there holding signs. So, even though I was mostly relieved, I have to admit I was a little disappointed too. A friend of ours was working "security" and talked with an ex-mormon protester. The protester said that he was baptized at 21, but when he came out he was excommunicated. He said he had nothing against the church per se, but was fighting for this cause. I can understand the prop H8ers point of view. I don't know if they can understand the other side, though. In a couple of attempts I have made to discuss the issue with H8ers, I have asked some questions but not received any answers. They tell me their point of view and when I ask questions (that are sincere to me) they end the coversation. I have resolved that this is an issue that both sides feel so strongly about that it is pointless and impossible to discuss. I wonder if anyone else has been able to have an enlightening conversation with opposing parties?

We actually had one lone protester outside our church building in random Logan, UT a couple of weeks ago. They either didn't realize they were in Utah, not California or they were in a time warp since Utah passed a similar proposition 4 years ago...

I did have a conversation with a group of very strong prop 8 supporters that turned out well. It was on-line, with the mothers from my parenting board. We've known each other for 4 years, so there was a lot of respect and good-will built up going into the conversation. I am certain that helped. We also decided that conversations about religion never go well when either side has angry feelings, so we didn't even go there until we could both look at things clearly.

In the end, they learned just how important the concept of marriage is to me, and I learned why they consider this a civil right. The conclusions we came to:

1 - Everyone has a limit on what they consider morally acceptable on a social level - whether it's changing the definition of marriage, or allowing a same-sex couple to marry who happen to be sisters, or allowing public pornography and nudity. We make legal decisions on moral boundaries in many ways.

2 - There is a difference between judging societal norms - which we do contribute to and have a say in - and judging individuals, whom we don't have a say in how they decide to run their lives. So, while I feel obligated to be wise with my stewardship over society, I can love and cherish friendships with individuals who live differently than me.

3 - Intimidation through protest is reactive, not constructive. If this truly is a civil rights issue, then it never should have made it onto the ballot in the first place. The anger is misplaced against the voters. It should be directed (if at all) at those who allowed the decision to come to a vote at all.

It took days to talk through it all and come to these conclusions, and it was very emotional. But it was a great conversation - one that I wish would happen more often.

Katie, it took me a while to figure out your typo! It's amazing that it was such a long process and great that the outcome was good. (And, btw, I'm stealing your idea for child art for you profile pic!)

Jonesisms

I6- "I think there are small stalactites on our van." After he had noticed icicles at the bottom of the van doors.

I6 - "Does Santa watch the Science Channel to see how he can make toys and other things?"

Just a Thought...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God; your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."~ Marianne Williamson