Falling Forward: How to Face the Unthinkable and Find Joy in the Process

In this video, I share my most personal story of a time when I faced the unthinkable and had to make the hard-right decision to fall forward.

Falling forward is a concept I share in my book, Gracious and Strong. It’s when you make hard-right decisions amidst the unexpected left turns you don’t expect in order to move forward.

Falling forward starts with defining who you are at your core. It requires you to stay true to your authentic self, staying open-minded when you are not in control of the circumstances. This will help you make the conscious choice to take the necessary steps to discover a remarkable future ahead.

Here are a few ways you can fall forward:

Face into reality. Accept that what’s happened has happened. Don’t get lost in doubtful questioning — Did I cause this? How could I have prevented this? Did I do the right thing? What pain did I cause others? Getting past the doubt and accepting the uncontrollable circumstances as quickly as possible is essential for falling forward.

Own what you should own. If you do bear some responsibility (especially in a transition) accept what you contributed to the situation — Did you meet all of the expectations of the job? Don’t try to ignore it or deny it. Own what you should own but don’t carry baggage with you that is just false. It will eat you up from the inside out. Really get clarity about the facts of what happened and ONLY own what you need to own.

Make a hard-right decision to step back into life. Take small steps and rebuild your strength. The natural reaction to a loss like this is not wanting to face anybody or anything. That may be okay for a day or a week but it’s unhealthy. That’s falling down, not falling forward. A lot of people get stuck and suffer in this place of falling down. Even worse, they don’t make the conscious effort to moving forward. A lot of people suffer in this place of falling down. They just get stuck there. Falling forward requires the mental and physical commitment to say I’m going to make a positive decision today and establish new healthy practices to keep myself mentally and physically happy.

Find joy and satisfaction. Start small and then work up to hard-right decisions that will bring you happiness. If you can focus on happiness or joy as your ultimate outcome you’ll begin to understand the small milestones that are getting you to that path. Make a daily commitment to finding that ONE positive thing and reach out to others who can support you in the process. Recent studies show we are happier when we are not alone. Take time to connect with others and ask for help as you navigate the uncertainty.