Men with higher incomes showed stronger preferences for women with slender bodies, while women with higher incomes preferred men who had a steady income or made similar money, according to a new survey of 28,000 heterosexual men and women aged between 18 and 75. The study was conducted by researchers at Chapman University in Orange, Calif., and is due to be published in the January 2016 edition of the peer-reviewed academic journal “Personality and Individual Differences.”

The researchers interviewed people in an online questionnaire about qualities they find important in a partner. “What really surprised us was just how substantial this difference was between men and women,” says David Frederick, assistant professor in health psychology at Chapman University and a co-author of the study. Women felt it was more important that their partner made at least as much money as they did (46% versus 24% of men) and had a successful career (61% versus 33% of men), while men favored a slender body (80% versus 58% of women).

And men with more education also had stronger preferences for female partners who were “good looking” and slender, whereas this was not a concern for women. Some 95% of men with an advanced degree said it was “essential” that their partner was “good looking” versus 77% of those with a high school education or less, and 84% of those men said it was essential that their partner was slender versus just 12% of those with a high school education or less.

So what does it all mean? A depressing confirmation of the worst gender stereotypes that suggests the dating game has not progressed much in the last 100 years? Perhaps. But it may go back even further than that, back to a time when social status (in a modern sense) was not important, Frederick says. Neither gender may be shallow, he says, but may be making their choice of mate because of millions of years of evolution. “Female bower birds select males with the nicest nest, and in many insects, the female selects a male who offers her a nice gift of prey he has captured,” he says.

But even these theories may not be so flattering for singletons in 2015. Slenderbodies are associated with youth as the body’s metabolism slows as one grows older and, as such, could represent fertility for men, Frederick adds, while women pay attention to things that enhance their survival and that of their family. Cultural factors, of course, can greatly influence the extent of these preferences, he says.

Valuing money and looks over personality may seem a tad superficial -- or not. “I don’t think this is superficial at all,” says Jacqueline Whitmore, the founder of The Protocol School of Palm Beach. “Speaking as a woman, most women of a certain age want security, but we also want someone who doesn’t look, act and dress like a troll. A woman must uphold her standards.”

But, she adds, character is just as important. “Life is too short to settle for someone who doesn’t treat you well. Being kind and having good manners also helps.”

The study may help people understand why the advertising industry (and society) puts so much emphasis on women being thin, “part of which is driven by pressure to attract a partner,” Frederick says. And it may also throw light on why men strive so aggressively for higher income and assertively negotiate for raises, “because income affects not only their ability to pay for dates but also their likelihood of attracting a partner.”

Both genders have a list of what they seek in a partner, says Fran Walfish, a Beverly Hills, Calif.-based psychotherapist, which may explain why the matchmaking and online dating industry is worth $2 billion combined.

“We have long known that men are more visual than women and women have a stronger need to be taken care of both emotionally and financially,” she says. Frederick says heterosexuals compete with members of the same sex to secure a romantic partner. “People with desirable traits are in a position to be more selective,” he says. He calls it the “mating market.” Presumably, gay people also compete with members of the same sex when looking for a partner.

There was one deviation: Older people care less about physical attraction, professional success or the potential to make a lot of money, the study found.

“I’d like to think that’s because, after a long life, they’ve learned that both looks and money can be fleeting but it’s the emotional connection you make with someone that sustains you,” says Abby Rodman, a psychotherapist in Boston.

Both genders reported nearly equally that being with someone physically attractive “to them” is important. “And that’s hopeful because it allows for physical imperfections — not the unattainable physical flawlessness we’re bombarded with every day in the media,” she says.

But what people want and what they actually get are two different things. “This is a study of what determines the qualities one is looking for in a mate,” says Roger Friedland, visiting professor of media, culture and communication at New York University, who has studied the behavior of American college students.

“It does not study who they actually mate with, the way they mate with them or the quality of the relationships they found,” Friedland said. Love is real and wanting to be married matters more to young people’s love lives than anything else, he says, “or whether you are beautiful or not so good looking.”

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