Sunday, February 19, 2012

nail clipper medical plan

do you ever notice something about yourself that you don't especially like and wish you could do something about it? like maybe you want to slice off a blob of belly fat, but you're afraid of bleeding to death in your bathroom, so you don't. or maybe you wish your toes weren't webbed and sometimes you imagine yourself using a scalpel and just slicing the pesky webbing away so your feet look like all the other kids.

i suspect that we all have those moments. or maybe it's just me. and my people.

i know a man who had a toothache and instead of going to the dentist like a normal person, he got out his pliers and ripped that sore tooth straight out of his head.

ouch!

i have a family member who would periodically cut off a mole on his neck with nail clippers. just snip, then blood pouring out, then bye bye neck mole. until it grew back. then it was time for another round of snip. bleed. bye bye neck mole.

i've tied string around moles til they got shrivelly and then cut them off with nail clippers. but it doesn't work on all types of moles. i learned this the hard way. if it throbs for several days and starts to swell rather than shrink, it's probably the wrong kind. and then it's hard to cut the string back off. let this be a warning to you adventurous types out there. don't try this technique unless you have a backup plan for how to remove the string should it start throbbing, making you feel like that part of your body is going to explode.

i cut a plantar's wart out of the sole of my foot with nail clippers. i tell ya, those nail clippers are a surgeon's best friend! never sterile, but always handy and maneuverable. and easy to rinse off when they get bloody.

one day, i decided that i didn't like it that one of my two front teeth was a little bit longer than the other one. it had been bothering me since those front teeth grew in during second grade. i decided it was time to do something about it, so i got out a metal nail file and started filing away. a little at a time because it was hard to stand the way it was radiating through my whole body for very long. but over the course of a couple hours, i got that one longish tooth evened up perfectly with the other and i even rounded off the edges a little so they'd match perfectly.

the moral of the story is, if you have string, pliers and a good manicure kit, you can take care of most of what ails you.

please share any of your home solutions because you never know when i might have a need for a new treatment plan.

38 comments:

I can't lie Sherilin, the stuff about you filing your tooth and the guy who pulled his tooth out with pliers seriously gives me cringes at the thought of doing that to my own teeth. I'm pretty glad there's nothing I need to work on right now using such extreme methods although chiselling out a six pac would be cool I have to admit, haha!

The mole?Or your armpit?If it was the mole, good.If it was your armpit, your shirts probably look funny.And I don't mean funny like a clown.I mean funny like Mary Ann Sterback from 6th grade, who had those squinky eyes and a snaggle tooth.

wow! i have one close to my armpit. maybe next time i'm shaving, i'll try it with my eyes closed & see if i can lop it off.and al, you so funny. and her snaggle tooth wasn't the worst of it. remember how she smelled?

I just cringe at the mole thing. I have a very tiny mole on my back, and one time, when the wife was playfully reaching out to grab me, she snagged it and ripped it clean off. Blood everywhere. That was not fun.

For years I tried to figure out how to straighten my own teeth with rubber bands. Never could get it right. The part I was apparently missing was the part where I would first have to yank out a tooth on each side to make room for the crookedy front ones to slide back into. Now that I have had an orthodontist do that for me I realize too late that I could have done it myself after all.

I managed to get over the moles, and blood part....but when you said you filed down your tooth, I got goosebumps and the hair stood up on my neck (NOT that I have hair on my neck, but if I did, it would have stood up)Was a feeling, sensation akin to scrathing your nails down a black board.oooooo...I just got the shivers all over again.

at least you didn't say that it was the hair on your BACK that was standing up.it kind of gives me goosebumps to remember it too. and i got a stern warning from my husband when i told him this story the other day not to be doing such foolish things again. and my daughter was warned to never listen to mommy's bad stories.

When my mom was young, her two front teeth were growing inward. When she went to the dentist to have it looked at, all he did was stick his thumb in behind her front teeth and yank forward. She has the straightest teeth I've ever seen!

It's amazing what people can and will do, although I don't think I could ever nail clip a mole off of my body, lol. I'm too much of a wimp!

Being one who has survived many surgeries and removals of skin cancer, please stop and get these things checked out. :) That being said, I will never forget how funny it was when I went for a pedicure and the woman looked at my toe, and I was like, yeah, I know, I went a little crazy. She shook her head at me. For some reason, I went to town on my toenails with the clipper, and clipped a lot. A lot.

Whoa- good to know, my friend. Not sure I will be filing any teeth anytime soon, but the rest may come in handy! I can always count on you to give it to me straight, ha! Your TMI is the best kind for sure!

Nice to know I'm not the only one that felt the need to break out the nail clippers for those annoying moles. If one gets too long I will irritate it all day everyday until its so sore I feel like the only relief is to just cut it off. And so I do. Lol!