6/29/2012

Sad Mitt Romney Looks Sad (and Other Funny Moments from Yesterday):

Oh, pity poor, sad Mitt Romney. Look at him there, looking all sad, in front of the Capitol. How very, very sad and small he seems. Could he be sadder? For, indeed, with the constitutionality of Obamacare upheld, he no longer has an argument he can make. The Supreme Court, in a bipartisan decision (yes, bipartisan), said there can be a national health care plan. Yes, yes, he'll call for repeal, he'll sneer about raised taxes, but, at the end of the day, Sad Mitt Romney can only sadly admit that his greatest accomplishment as a single-term governor was making Massachusetts into a testing ground for the Obama health care plan, a plan that a big majority of Massachusetts residents really, really like. And Sad Mitt Romney is allowed only to be sad about it.

But, hey, buck up there, fella. You're rakin' in the dough. You'll get a little bump in the polls. And it'll all be okay until the first time you actually have to debate President Obama and he thanks you for your health care plan. Let's hope Obama smiles and gives you a thumbs up, too.

Hey, at least Romney didn't go the ignorance is bliss route of others.

The insane Rand Paul, a man who always looks as if he just masturbated on a woman in a bear suit, really did say, "Just because a couple people on the Supreme Court declare something to be 'constitutional' does not make it so." To which one can only respond, "Umm, actually...oh, never mind." Apparently, just because a man is a senator does not mean he understands basic civics.

Between lying about the size of the "tax increase" (which is mostly the penalty that will be paid by the roughly 4-6% of idiots who don't buy health insurance) and spewing more bullshit per hour than most bulls actually defecate in a month, Rush Limbaugh went all apocalyptic: "Between the Arizona and Obamacare decisions, America is a very different concept than it was just a week ago... The Constitution's under assault, and so is every individual living here under assault." Oh, Mary, calm down.

Here's what's gonna happen with the Affordable Care Act: Nothing other than what was intended. The law will continue to take effect. People will start to realize, "Holy shit, this isn't the end of days," and they'll get those weird moles checked, the ones they got from standing outdoors in their teabagger costumes without sunscreen for all those protests. Obama will be reelected. If Republicans keep the House, they'll try to defund it. They'll try to repeal it. It won't happen. And by the end of 2014, when millions of people are actually helped, it won't even be an issue anymore.

Blind optimism? No. Just a belief that most Americans are gonna now be sick and tired of this debate. Unlike the screechy assholes of the right, most Americans recognize that the fight's over. Let's just move on. That's the great and sad thing about us. We can stop giving a shit on the turn of a dime.