Tales from the front.

Readers Shower Hillary With (helpful?) Advice

October 20, 1998|By Cheryl Lavin, Tribune Staff Writer.

What would you do if you were Hillary Clinton? Would you stand by your man or kick his cheating butt out the door? Would you do it now or wait till he's out of the White House? Here's what you'd do if you were first lady . . .

Betsy: "I'm a Republican and have never been a fan of Bill Clinton. However, I do admire Hillary's grace under fire. What she should do is this: Ride out the storm and continue maintaining her dignity. Keep enjoying all of the perks of being first lady. After Bill's term is over she should immediately divorce him, write a best seller about her life with him and expose some very scandalous secrets about Washington. After making millions from the book and movie deal she could find some cute boy toy who will be completely devoted to her and retire to some wonderful Caribbean island."

Fred: "I would send a personal, hand-written note on my very best stationery to Monica Lewinsky, saying, `Dear Monica, thank you so much for taking time to help relieve Bill's tension. Being president is very stressful. Sorry you had to give back the presents. They were obviously meant as payment for a job well done.' I would sign it, `Bill's wife, Hillary.' "

Diana: "I would not say a word or show any feeling of betrayal. But when Bill comes to the end of his term, I would move on moving day, but not with him. I would just ask him for a forwarding address so I could send him his divorce papers."

John: "Hillary should send this message to the public: `Please don't make a big deal out of my situation. It's likely the same thing happened in your family and among your friends and local civic leaders. Don't blind yourself to events in your life, then go moralistic-ballistic over the same event in my life."

Patsy: "I would insist Bill see a psychiatrist who is an expert in sexual addiction. The president has some kind of a psychological disorder. I feel that anyone who fondles women at every opportunity, jeopardizes his office and is an embarrassment to the world is not in control of his mind or his body. Hillary obviously loves the man, and he is certainly worth saving, but only if he would go into therapy immediately. If not he should be kicked out the door."

Rusty: "I'd have him neutered."

Brad: "If it weren't for her position and her goals, I would say she should leave him. Their marriage is not based on what most people's marriages are based on: love, respect. It's based on power and politics. She may love him, but from the start she believed he would be president one day. That's what kept her all those years."

Rachel: "I'd stay with Bill as long as he is in the White House. The perks are real good. They deserve each other with their lying, deceitful ways. Chelsea is the one my heart goes out to with parents of such low morals and character."

Allison: "I would visit him in the Oval Office, take him off to the little windowless hallway and kick him so hard in the you-know-where he'd never bother anyone again."

Risa: "I would never be in Hillary Clinton's position. I don't want power. I married strictly for love. This couple did not marry for love. It was marriage that would be beneficial to each of them. It was a business deal. She wanted power, and it was not yet time for a female president. He had a lot of potential, and she could help him reach their goals. She went into the relationship with her eyes open. She knew she might have to accept his infidelity. That doesn't mean she's happy."

Jane: "I think everyone is very cynical about Hillary and Bill. I believe they really love each other. Any man can stray when a little hussy throws herself at him. If I were Hillary, I would hold on tight. Bill really loves her. You can see by the way they look at each other. Maybe I would keep him on a shorter leash so he wouldn't be tempted again."

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Is there any sympathy out there for Monica? Have any of you ever been a Monica or a Bill or a Hillary? Send your comments to Cheryl Lavin, Tales from the Front, Chicago Tribune, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL. 60611 or e-mail to CLavin@Tribune.com. All names are changed. Please include day and evening phone numbers. Letters may be used in whole or in part for any purpose and become the property of the column.