Should I turn it into a homage to one of BMW's 'art cars'? Buy a big pack of marker pens and get busy? Wallpaper the outside? Vinyl wrap it? Brush paint it? Roller it? I need help.

In a bizarre twist, the current favourite idea is to paint it the same colour as my old Porsche 912, Crystal Blue. An odd choice, but I like the colour and think it could look rather nice if a little unoriginal.

So, I am turning to you, the readers, in my hour of need. Download the photo of my Scimitar, get busy with your Photoshop and send your results to martin.port@haymarket.com – you never know, you might just have the solution to my quandary.

Why just one color? You've got a crisp line for a two-tone. Perhaps Persian Orange and Creme like an old Allis Chalmers tractor. Or maybe do it up in camouflage; perhaps with a WWII-evoking toothy "Flying Tigers" effect up front.
But then, I'm an American...