Dueling fawtas were recently
issued against members of an English singing group the “Little Boogers” by
rival mosques in
Bristol
,
England
. One fatwa called for the stoning of the singers for popularizing the lyrics to
an underwear commercial. Spokesmen for the Boogers who are under police
protection and in hiding say it’s all based on a misunderstanding.

The “Little Boogers” got
their name from a rhinoceros at the Baltimore Zoo which in turn was named after
an American baseball player.
Baltimore
,
Maryland
is the home of the American League baseball team, the Baltimore Orioles. From
1960 through his retirement in 1977, John Wesley “Boog” Powell was the
team’s first baseman and a frequent team MVP. Powell was both a power hitter
and a crowd favorite.

The year Powel retired, the
Baltimore Zoo was blessed with the birth of an endangered white rhinoceros on
August 17th which also happens to be Boog Powel’s birthday.
“Daisy” the mother, at 32, had been thought to be past her breeding life but
the ardent attention of the Zoo’s newly acquired seven-year-old Rhino,
“Stubby,” surprised and delighted the zoo’s keepers. The resulting baby
was named for Mr. Powel. “Baby Boog” the rhinoceros, was introduced to
cheering fans at the old Memorial Stadium on the last day of his namesake’s
career. The appearance had been bitterly criticized by animal rights activists
and when shortly thereafter “Baby Boog” developed an incurable case of
sphincter incontinence critics blamed the condition on his ballpark appearance.

The efforts of the Baltimore
Zoo to cure Baby Boog’s problem got unwanted attention when visiting cameramen
from a local television station recorded an especially gruesome episode of the
incontinence while an unfortunate caretaker was attending to Baby Boog. A video
feed supplied by the station to the then fledgling Comedy Television Channel
became stock footage for years afterward.

It was while watching this
infamous video that an executive of the Fruit of the loom company got the
inspiration to offer the zoo diapers disguised as briefs. The desperate Zoo
accepted the offer and Baby Boog’s new diapers were designed to look just like
the company’s white cotton underpants. Sturdy liners prevented any leakage and
kept the briefs clean and white.

Subsequently the company used
the gift as the basis for an advertising campaign. An ad with a dozen men clad
only in the company’s signature product danced a conga while singing the
praises of underpants to the Mexican tune “La Cucaracha.” These are the
lyrics:

My tighty whities
My tighty whities

The elastic hugs my waist

My tighty whities
My tighty whities
When I wear them I feel chaste

When I go into the locker room
I see every kind of pantaloon
Thongs and boxers I see by the score
Even jockey’s but their just a bore

My tighty whities
My tighty whities

How I love my underwear
My tighty whities
My tighty whities
When you wear them you’re not square

The ad’s final scene ends
incongruously with a cartoon Baby Boog clad in underpants winking at the
audience. The real Baby Boog was a little too belligerent for a live shot.

Although the ad ran briefly in
the Atlantic market the company quickly pulled it due to declining sales
figures. Associating Fruit-of-the-Loom with an incontinent rhinoceros proved to
be a poor way to promote men’s briefs.

In April of 2005 singer Stan
Paki of
Bristol
,
England
, was traveling through
Atlanta
,
Georgia
, on his way to a
Florida
vacation when he heard the jingle on the news. An
Atlanta
station which had aired the ad in a program about TV bloopers was being sued by
a Fulton County District Attorney for broadcasting prurient material. The
attorney, Wayne Egativ, who also serves as a part-time Southern Baptist
preacher, was upset by the nearly naked men in the ad.

Mr. Paki, inspired by the
silliness copied down the lyrics and recorded them with some friends when he
returned to
England
. Paki, a Sunni Muslim and three friends, all Shia Muslims, recorded “My
Tighty Whities” onto a CD as a novelty song. They called their group the
“Little Boogers” in honor of the rhinoceros. When
Bristol
’s children began singing the nonsense song the Little Boogers found
themselves in hot water with the leaders of two Bristol Mosques. First Shia
Imam, Ali bin Sufi declared a fatwa on the group calling them “perverters of
youth.” Not to be outdone the mufti of the local Sunni shrine declared a fatwa
calling for the stoning of the Little Boogers.

The angry outcry against the
“Little Boogers” was apparently aggravated by the group’s name. In English
slang a “bugger” is a homosexual. To the ears of the incensed clerics
“Little Boogers” sounded like the “little homosexuals.” Coupled with the
lyrics of the group’s only hit song it’s not surprising that their music was
so provocative.

The British government has
forbidden any more airplay for the song My Tighty Whities. Meanwhile government
representatives are negotiating with both mosques to have the fatwas against the
Little Boogers lifted.