LONG RUNS BEAUTY AND THE BEAST: Palace, Broadwa) at 47th St 307-4100. . . . BLUE MAN GROUP/TUBES: Astor Place Theatre, 434 Lafdyette St. 254-4370. . . . BRING IN DA NOISE, BRING IN DA FUNK: Ambassador, 219 W 49th St. 239-6200. . . . CATS: Winter Garden, Brodd- way at 50th St. 239-6200. . . . CHICAGO: Shubert, 225 W. 44th St. 239-6200. . . . THE FANTASTICKS: Sullivan Street Playhouse, 181 Sullivan St., dt Bleecker St. 674-3838. . . . FORBIDDEN BROADWAY STRIKES BACK!: Stardust, Broadway at 51 t St. 239- 6200. . . . A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM: St. James, 246 W. 44th St. 239-6200. . . . GRANDMA SYLVIA'S FUNERAL: SoHu Playhouse, 15 Van- dam St 691-1555.... HOWARD CRABTREE'S WHEN PIGS FLY: Douglas Fairbank , 432 W. 42nd St. 239-6200. . .. I LOVE YOU, YOU'RE PERFECT, NOW CHANGE: Westside, 407 W. 43rd St. 239-6200. . . . THE KING AND I: Neil Simon, 250 W. 52nJ St. 307 -4100. . . . LES MISÉRABLES: Imperial, 249 W 45th St. 239-6200. . . . MISS SAIGON: Broadway The- atre, Broadway at 53rd St. 239-6200. . . . PERFECT CRIME: Duffy, 1553 Broadway, at 46th St. 695- 3401. . . . THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA: Majestic, 245 W. 44th St. 239-6200.... RENT: Neder- lander, 208 W 41st St. 921-8000. . . . SMOKEY JOE'S CAFE: Virginia, 245 W 52nd St. 239-6200. . . . STOMP: Orpheum, 126 Second Ave., at St. Marks PI. 477-2477. . . . TONY 1'4' TINA'S WEDDING: St. John's Church, 81 Christopher St. 239-6200. DANCE "THARP!"- TVvyla Tharp, the indomitable choreog- rapher with the onomatopoeic name, returns with two program for her new company. The first features three local premières. The sec- ond includes a world première, "Roy's Joys," set to musical selections by the Roy of the tItle, the late expatriate trumpeter Roy El- dridge, who memorialized Harlem in the jazz compositions he wrote in Paris in the early fifties. (City Center, 131 W. 55th St. 581-1212 Program A: Oct. 8, Oct 10, and Oct. 12 at 8, and Oct. 11 at 3. . . . Program B: Oct. 9 and Oct. 11 at 8, and Oct. 12 at 3.) "DER FENSTERPUTZER"-Pina Bausch and her tran- scendently seedy troupe offer an opera-length work, inspired by a three-week stay in Hong Kong. (Brooklyn Academy of Music, 30 Lafa- yette Ave. 718-636-4100. Oct. 7-11 at 7:30- note early performance time.) DANCEBRAZIL-Choreographer Jelon Vieira and his twenty-member company present the première of "Camard" (whose movements are drawn from capoeira, a martial art in dance dis- gui e), and' 'Quilombos" (1996), inspired by the plight of Africans in colonial Brazil (Joyce Theatre, 175 Eighth Ave, at 19th St. 242-0800. Oct 7 at 7:30, Oct. 8-10 at 8, Oct. 11 at 2 and 8, and Oct. 12 at 2.) "RIVERDANcE"-The ddncing Irish (eighty strong) bring their high-octane jig , reels, and horn- pipes to the home of the kick line. (Radio City Music Hall, Sixth Ave. at 50th St. 247-4777. Oct. 8-10 at 8 and Oct. 11-12 at 2 dnd 8.) "THE GOLDBERG V ARIATlONS"-For the inaugurd- tion of Danspace Project's Lone Star eries, dancer Mark Haim avails himself of the Bach compositions, played live by pianist André Gribou, as the basis for thirty solos, whose lively range of choreographic moods is offset by a studiously simple presentation--one costume, bare stage. (St. Mark's In-the-Bouwerie, Second Ave at 10th St. 674-8194. Oct. 10-12 at 8:30.) BALLET HISPANlco-The troupe continues to com- mission works on Hispanic themes. This year's crop Includes' 'Ritmo y Ruido," an urban Afro- Cuban blend by the Broadway choreographer Ann Reinking, and "Poema Infinita," by Maria Rovira, set to a poem GarcIa Lorca wrote dunng his unhappy sojourn in New York. (Hostos Center for the Arts, 450 Grand Concourse, at 149th St., the Bronx 718-518-4455. Oct. 1] at 2 and 7:30.) NA YO AND FRIENDS-Tokyo ndtlve N ayo Taka aki and her ix-member troupe in "Surroundings," a multi- part work in which movable IJdnels are used I to reconfigure the performance pdce for each segment (Merce Cunningham Studio, 55 Bethune ëO St. 924-0077 Oct 10 at 9 and Oct 11-12 dt 8 ) NIGHT LIFE CONCERTS LUTHER V ANDROSS / VANESSA WILLlAMs-Vandross continues to uffer from a lack of relevance: his voice is d thing of beauty, but his material is excruciating A recent collection of cover songs-"Killing Me Softly," "End- less Love," "The Impossible Dream"-had Atlantic City written all over it. / If it ever becomes possible to genetically engineer a pop star, the scientists will have a hard time cooking up a specimen like Vanessa Wil- liams. All the elements of her early talent- show training remain intact: she sings, she dances, she acts, she glows It makes for a ":> .. (. ..., -" . .,., ...;::: - 19 American student), pianist and jdzz-festival power broker George Wein (who occasion- ally played with Bechet), and inger Carrie Smith. Newly arranged Bechet cla sic dre on the program, and so is a rare performance of Bechet's extended composition, "The Hill on the Delta." (Carnegie Hall. 247-7800 Oct 9 at 8 ) "A SWELL PARTY: THE COLE PORTER SONGBOOK"- Vocalist Melba Moore and four supporting singers wend their way through more than thirty Porter tunes. (Kaye Playhouse, Hunter College, Park Ave. at 68th St. 772-4448. Oct. 9-11 at 8 and Oct 12 at 3.) ANDREW CYRILLE AND CARLOS W ARD-Cyrille can play the drums inside, outside, and upside down; there isn't a rhythm or a formal ploy ,..... ,., .=:; 1J:"' \, -.,. IC' <\., \\ .. 't \ A The Last of the International Playboys, at Fez and the Supper Club formidable, if unconvincing, total-entertainer package. Her latest album, "Next," lacks a once-in-a-lifetime nugget like "Save the Best for Last," but it's still a well-d embled effort, entirely safe for modern radio (Madi- son Square Garden. 465-6000 Oct. 8 at 7:30.) BILLY TAYLOR TRIO WITH DONALD BYRD- T dylor's piano work mirrors his persond: turdy, eru- dite, and resolutely mainstream. Byrd was a hard-bop utility trumpeter throughout the fifties and ixties, and then he went pop and hip-hop. He seem to be back in the fold these days, blowing with the brawnv tone that made him o relidble way back when. (Metropolitan Mu eum, Fifth Ave at 83rd St. 570-3949. Oct. 9 dt 7.) SUSANA BACA-A standout on the David Bvrne- assembled album "Afro-Peruvian Classics: The Soul of Black Peru," this Lima native brings a sumptuous Spanish, Andean, and African mix to her sensual music. (Tishman Auditorium, New School, 66 W 12th St. 229-5689 Oct. 9 dt 7:30.) "SIDNEY BECHET: A CENTENNIAL CELEBRATION"- A long time dgO, in a not so distant galaxy, the oprano saxophone was a horn of fury and beduty-not the lite-jazz pipsqueak into which it's degenerated When Sidney Bechet, the first Jazz virtuoso and the only mdn who could worry Louis Armstrong, picked it up, the earth shook and grown men wept: Bechet's power wa equalled only by hIS lyricism. The Intrepid Carnegie Hall JaLz Band, in its salute to the soprano- saxophone giant (whose geniu also extended to the clarinet), calls upon special guests Bob Wilber the hrilliant saxophonist dnd musical scholar and Bechet's only hving that the man hasn't mastered. Carlos Ward is the eminently soulful alto saxophonist and flutist who played with Abdullah Ibra- him and the late Don Cherry; his inside/ outside proclivities make him a fine match for the drummer. (Museum of Modern Art, 11 W 53rd St. 708-9491 Oct. 10 at 5:30.) WARREN V ACHÉ, JOE PUMA, AND M URRA Y W ALL- Cornetti t V dché and guitarist Puma must channel Bix Beiderbecke and Eddie Lang when they play together, so certain is their feel for the lyrical pledsures of classic jazz. Bassist Wall rounds out the trio (Church of the Heavenly Rest, Fifth Ave at 90th St. 752-1428. Oct. 12 at 5.) EIGHTH ANNUAL MABEL MERCER CABARET CONVEN- TION-A week's worth of song at Town Hall. Oct. 13 at 6: Opening night, with, among others, Barbara Carroll, Amanda McBroom, Phillip Officer, and Julie Wilson. Oct. 14 at 6: J udi Connelli, Natalie Douglas, Tom An- dersen. Continues through Oct. 19. (123 W. 43rd St. 840-2824.) SARAH McLACHLAN / MADELEINE PEYROUx-As the founder of the all-female Lilith Tour, one of the few big summer festivals to actually make money, this Canadian singer finally elevated herself from the cult fringes to the big time, proof of which came with the unexpected debut at No. 2 of her latest record, "Surfacing." Her style is in the tra- dition of a long line of female musician- artiste , from Kate Bush to Paula Cole, but her music is weeter and softer-edged. / The radiant singer Peyroux channels the voice of Billie Holiday and other jdZZ divas, sprinkling the result with a healthy dose of New Or- leans spice (The Theatre at Madison Square Garden. 465-6000. Oct. 14-15 at 8 )