Monday, May 24, 2010

Back from our consult with our new RE Dr Wizard. We really like him and we talked ALOT. Overall our appointment took about 2 hours. We went in and sat down in Dr Wizard's office to talk and go over my whole history. The good thing was his office is literally 2 doors down from my last Dr's office, so his nurse was able to walk right over and get my chart to see my history.

Dr Wizard said if the only thing keeping me from getting pregnant is my lack of ovulation, then that's easy to fix, which is awesome news. His big concern was making sure I'm not insulin resistant becasue that is one of the main causes of anovulatory cycles/no cycles at all. So he ordered ALL kinds of tests. After our tests are all done and we go on to actual treatment, we'll probably do either Clomid + HCG Trigger, or more than likely start straight off on a cycle of injectables...He said typically he likes to start with a cycle of injectables using Gonal-F. (wow, that just gave me chills typing that out, I feel like I'm really in the "big leagues" of infertility...yes I'm a dork). So after all of my tests are done then we will see where we go next. He also went over DHs last SA and said...and I quote..."Wow, these results are really good...too good...like these are like olymic numbers...like you could probably go pro if you wanted to!" LOL He also said, he's never seen an SA as good as his, especially his motility, so he wants DH to do another just incase the last person didn't know what they were doing. The good thing is they gave us the option of booking an appointment to do it there or doing it at home and running it over as long as they get it within 70 minutes. I told DH he gets to use their "fun room" that they have, and he said "if by fun room, you mean a room with x-box and a pool table, then I'm in, if not I'd like to do it at home" (my DH, always the comedian) Needless to say we took a bag with a cup in it home for him to do it here.

Next, he took us into an exam room, and said we were going to have a little date with "wandy" which I have had many before. (For those of you reading who are not IF, "wandy" is slang for and internal ultrasound...AKA Transvaginal US...AKA sticking a giant ultrasound wand up your girly bits to take a closer look at your ovaries and uterus.) I informed him that I was CD 4, and still on my period..."Oh that's okay" he said "it won't get in the way" ((EEW)) Whatever, so I undressed from the waist down and he came back in with his nurse and did the internal. He said my uterus looked amazing and perfect from what he could tell and just waiting to have a baby! My ovaries looked very polycystic, and had tons of small cysts. The left ovary still has the massive cyst on it, but he said from the looks of it, it looks like a cyst attached to the outside of my ovary and not growing from within, which he said was better, so that's good. (He called it like a paracyst or something like that)

After I cleaned up and he showed me where the extra tampons and pads were (embarrassing), I got dressed, had my blood pressure taken and weight, and then went into our Nurse's office. She is the.sweetest.thing.in.the.world. She's adorable, and sooo bubbly, I love her! I think her code name on this blog will now and forever be Nurse Perky, because she is just that, always smiling and perky!

She gave us tons and tons of lab slips and prescriptions, so here's the plan...

Since I am on CD 4 today, and the Dr wants us to do a "Clomid Challenge Cycle" (to check to make sure how my ovaries are working and to check my ovarian reserve) I went in for blood work as soon as we left Dr Wizard's office. I had about 3 vials taken! I filled a Rx for 100mg of Clomid CDs 5-9 which I start tomorrow. Next tuesday (CD 12) I go back to Dr Wizards for another date with Wandy, as as soon as I leave there, I go back to Quest to get more vials of blood taken. Then I need to schedule a 2 hour GTT (better that the 3hour I had to do last time) to check for insulin resistance to see if I need to stay on the Metformin. Then if AF doesn't come on her own I go back for another blood draw to make sure I'm not pregnant (insert laugh) and then fill my Rx they gave me for Provera. When CD1 starts for that cycle, I call Nurse Perky, we do ANOTHER blood test to make sure I'm not pregnant, I start taking my Rx I have for a Z-Pack and have my HSG done around CDs 7-10 (which I'm really scared of). After all of that is done, then we can start treatment.

I don't think time will drag, with all that's going on, so at least that's good.

A+ if you read that entire thing! All in all, we love our new RE and his staff, and I think this is the start of a beautiful ending!

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Going to see Dr Wizard tomorrow for our first consult with him! It's also our 2 year anniversary tomorrow so it will be a busy day, but I'm so excited! (and a little nervous)I'll update tomorrow when I can about how it went and what he says.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Well, I think I'm about to start spotting. I've been a major TPI the past 2 days and nothing (for those of you not IF...TPI stands for toilet paper inspector lol). Well right now I went to check my CM and CP and there was some faint pink tinged CM mixed with the normal CM, so I think AF is a-comin'...which I'm not surprised considering my temp drop. The good thing is I may have Oed...the not so good thing is I think if I do end up Oing in the future, I may have a problem with my LP, since my temp drops somewhere around 8 or 9dpo! I have a feeling AF will be here either tomorrow or by friday. When she comes, I'm debathing doing a cycle of Soy (since I have an unopened bottle), but I'm not sure since I'll be seeing our RE on monday...I don't know, I may just take a little while off and see what he says. *shrugs*

Hey, at least AF is coming on her own and I don't have to take any Provera! That's a huge thing for me!

Monday, May 17, 2010

So I wrote this whole thing out for my consult on Monday to give Dr Wizard (our new RE) a basic overview of our TTC history. I wanted to post it in case I ever needed it in the future and to catch up any new readers. Thank God I keep a blog, or there's no way I would have remembered all of this!

June 2008: Came off birth control pill and started trying to conceive…didn’t have a natural period after that until 6 months after in January 2009.

March 2009: Started seeing OBGYN for infertility. She prescribed Provera to induce my period and then had blood-work done on cycle day 3.

April 2009: OBGYN said all labs she did looked fine and so she ordered the 3 hour GTT.

May 2009: GTT results were good. Blood sugar was fine, no diabetes. Found an elevated testosterone level. Clinically diagnosed with PCOS. Prescribed Metformin (1500mg a day)

June 2009: Upped the Metformin dosage to 2000mg a day. Prescribed Provera again after a115 day long cycle.

October 2009: Mike and I had infertility blood-work panel done & tested for STDs, all came back normal. Given Provera again to induce period.

November 2009: 1st Clomid cycle on 50mg CDs 3-7. No ovulation. Projesterone blood draw came back at a 0.8 Given Provera again.

December/January 2009: 2nd Clomid cycle with 100mg CDs 3-7. Had a follicle check on CD9 Left ovary had a 14mm follicle. Had an almost positive OPK on CD22, and a temperature rise on CD 24. Luteal Phase of 10 days. Cycle was 34 days total. Projesterone blood draw came back at a 3.0 Period started on it’s own this cycle. Had an ultrasound because of pelvic pressure, Dr found fluid and thinks a cyst may have burst, puts us on a 2 month break.

February 2010: Had a follow up ultrasound and everything looked great.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

I just wanted to thank you all for the amazing warm and comforting responses on my last post. I was just having "one of those days" where literally everything was making me cry and feel so down on myself. I have to say that when I woke up today I felt much much better. I think, like alot of you said, you just have to let yourself feel sad when you need to. I love that I have this place to get it all out there in the open and I love even more the amazing support system that I have found here. I love you girls so much!

I don't think I'll really be leaving the MB's, I can't...it's been my home for so long and I can't fully cut it out of my life...but if I get too overwhelmed, I know I can just click that little red button at the top right of my screen and it makes it all okay. :)

FF didn't give me CHs, and I went ahead and entered in fake temps for the next 3 days just to see and it doesn't do CHs either. If I enter in random temps on the days I didn't temp, I get dotted or solid CHs (depending on the temps I choose)...either for last sunday (which is the last day we have BD) or for 3 days ago (which if that's the case, I don't think we BD anywhere close to where we should have.)

So my body has done one of 2 things, either another cyst burst (which I don't think is the case since I feel nothing like the last time when it burst and I had CHs on my chart)...or for the first time in TTC history I Oed. *shrugs* Even if I did O, and it was timed right, I wonder if my lining would be too thick since I'm on CD 53. I don't know, I'm not too concerned...if AF is here by either the beginning or the end of next week I'll know something happend. (If I did O, I could be anywhere from 3-7dpo)

I don't think I'm going to request a Projesterone draw since I'm between Drs right now and I can't call my new RE since we haven't had our first consult yet, and since I'm not referred to my old Dr anymore, I'd have to pay for the draw, and I really don't want to do that.

So I'm a little in limbo, but honestly, that's okay. Limbo is way better than nothing..and nothing is usually what I get. :) Love you all. xoxo

Saturday, May 15, 2010

It's official, girls I had been TTC #1 with, are now pregnant with #2.

I just feel so lost right now.

I feel itty bitty and tiny, and so forgotten.

Why not me?

I'm a good person. I love God. I try to always be cheerful and happy. I always try to be so giving to others. I'm honest and trustworthy. I've always delt with infertility as my "cross to bear", and always have been happy for other people's miracles...but I'm tired.

I don't want to have to spend $315 EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. I walk into my RE's office. I don't want to have to keep taking meds that pump me so full of hormones I can barely see straight. I don't want to spend thousands on injectables, knowing the chance of them working are very very slim, let alone the money we'll have to spend on IVF with very slim chances of it working if we have to get there...I don't want to feel like I had to buy my baby! I don't want to be different from everyone else, and I don't want to be so sad the 10 times a day I see a pregnant belly staring at me. I don't want to have a disease that prevents me from ovulating or getting pregnant.

Why is it that 15 year old girls get pregnant with twins, time after time...yet DH and I who are more than ready are left with empty arms and broken hearts.

I think I really need to take some time away from the Message Boards. I just can't continue to torture myself. If you're from the MBs, I'm sure you understand, especially if you're IF.

I would never wish infertility on anyone...why was I cursed with it and SO left behind?

Friday, May 14, 2010

Look at my chart...yeah, random high temp today...that's what I get for being lazy and not temping for 2 days. The last time we BD was last Sunday...I guess in the next few days we'll see if it stays up or not. http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/24ff9a

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

We scheduled my consultation with our new RE for May 24th which also happens to be our 2 year wedding anniversary...I wouldn't have thought we would one day be spending our 2nd anniversary in an infertility clinic, BUT I'm hoping it will be good luck!

Monday, May 3, 2010

I'm so excited to get in with "Dr Wizard"! I have butterflies in my tummy! Even though we've been through alot already I feel like were in the big leagues now lol. I called and left a message to set up my new patient consultation, so hopefully that can get booked soon!

Why do I feel sooo nervous? It's like a combo of nervous/giddy. Oh well who cares what I'm feeling! Hopefully this will be the guy to knock me up!

About Me

Welcome! I'm Amy, a late 20 something Polish-Italian Catholic dealing with infertility. I married the love of my life on May 24th 2008 and we decided to start trying for children on June 24th 2008. It's been a hard road, but we have been finally blessed with a positive pregnancy test on June 19th 2010, almost exactly 2 years to the day we started trying. I don't always censor myself on this blog. Read what you like or none at all...but this is my story about my "Miracle in the Making".