Hey folks, so I've got a super super rough draft here that I'm looking for SPaG, tone, concept, and execution feedback on. Please pull no punches here, as I want to shape this to be the absolute best it can be. I have gone extremely light on the biological details purposefully, because if I'm being completely honest, I could have written an expose on an anomalous retrovirus which transforms one person into another, but I don't think people would be interested in that kind of heavy detail, so I've focused more on the Foundation's viewpoints towards the virus's effects, and the kind of dark/wacky effects it can have on personnel.

Just my advice, but it is best that rather than asking people not to take punches, you let them punch you, and intercept the punch with a block. Also, it's best to take your ideas to other people, even if you think they won't work.