Castle Guide

About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone.
ایمام سیزدهم

The Burden of Proof

Tell me again why Barack Obama has been such a bad president? I’m not talking here about him as a tactician and communicator. We can agree that he has played some bad poker with Congress. And let’s stipulate that at the moment he’s falling short in the intangibles of leadership….

Your mission, Jim (and readers named something else), should you decide to accept it, is to identify where Obama has been a poor decision-maker. What, specifically, has he done wrong on policy? What, specifically, would you have done differently to create jobs? And what can any of the current Republican candidates offer that would be an improvement on the employment front?

I’m not interested in hearing ad hominem attacks or about your generalized “disappointment.”

I want to know, on a substantive basis, why you think he deserves to be in a dead heat with Mitt Romney and Rick Perry and only a few points ahead of Ron Paul and Michele Bachmann in a new Gallup Poll. Is it just that any president — regardless of circumstances and party — who presides over 9 percent unemployment deserves to lose?

And so the pundits have been preparing formal and lengthy responses, replies, and lists of examples.

The Czar has a different response: up yours.

Alter seems to thinkas do many on the Professional Left, as wellthat there must be some reason their President is such a turd, especially after all that polishing. Implicit in Mr. Alters challenge that the vast majority of Americans have no objective, substantive reason to deny Mr. Obama a second term.

Actually, Mr. Alter, they dont need one. This is how politics works. Instead, the onus is on Mr. Obama to explain to the vast majority of Americans why he deserves a second shot. You see, they have their reasons, and whether a Newsweek writer (whom we deny the charity of calling responsible journalists) gets it or not, voters do not need to explain themselves to you. If they want to dunk the President based on ad hominem attacks, generalized disappointment, and so on, dude, thats how it goes.

There is so much left-wing nuttery in this challenge that it begs the Czar to ask Mr. Alter where he gets off. Why should we, or anyone, tell Mr. Obama how to run his fizzling campaign. You know, the American people have been telling the President where he has made poor decisions. And where he has gone wrong on policy. And we very much have been explaining how to create jobs.

Your challenge as a would-be journalist, Mr. Alter, is to provide an indication as to why the President doesnt care what we think. And why, if you wish to tack on another paragraph, we should give a hoot what you think.

This is the challenge. Your inability to research or think critically has already been met. Now, you meet ours. Betcha cant.

About The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй.The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia by upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago.He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.