Musings on sex & disability, accessible sex toys, and sexuality.

How to be a Good Consumer of Porn

How to be a Good Consumer of Porn

An etiquette guide to buying, watching, and paying for porn.

Read key information first.

Do the model I favour, don’t ask a zillion and one questions. It not only takes up a lot of our time, but it really annoys us. Most of use spend time on graphics, webpages, maybe even an FAQ, so your questions are answered. Deciding your too good to read this means we’re probably not going reply to you, or we will just direct you to wear your question is answered.

Bottom line, check first. If the information isn’t on one of these pages, sure ask us. Bu please do your due diligence first.

Pay for the time you take up.

Every minute and answering a question that’s already listed, or replying to an email are you send a question after question in single emails, is a minute we’re not earning money.

We also have to deal with an above average rate of freeloaders. People come into our inboxes, talk with us, exchange emails with us, only to vanish and not pay. Our time is valuable, sex workers are all sorts of things; some of us are disabled, some of us are mothers, some of us run businesses on the side, and more.

Good clients know that our time is valuable, and pay for it.

Don’t add extras after the fact.

If you have already payed your custom, don’t turn around and add extras after-the-fact. Just ask them first. It saves everybody time. It’s also just polite.

Be Honest

We’re not going to tease your fantasy out of you, we are too busy for that honestly, and we know that for some it’s a fantasy in itself. So if there is something in particular that you want, tell us. Be honest about your sexual desires. You’ll find that most sex workers are open minded – of course it should go without saying, nothing illegal.

Don’t Haggle

Our Price is our price. Trying to get a lower price demeans our value and our work, and we work hard. If we sell a custom $400 dollars to you, because that’s what you want, it’s a reflection of the time, effort, and cost that goes into making clip. Some clips, for instance hypno clips, require effects and green screen work, some will require specialist outfits or equipment. We factor that cost into your custom.

On the same thread, unless we’ve explicitly asked for ideas, don’t email us saying you got a great idea for a clip that is just your fantasy. We know. And if you do that, we will go out of our way to not film what you’ve sent us.

Fanmail

This one is just the courtesy thing, if you love your custom or the clip you’ve just brought that’s great. Let us know on our social platforms, but we don’t want a long detailed version, especially not in our inboxes – ideally we want to know to know in a tip note.

On the other hand if you’ve never brought a clip, and you send us email after email, and tweet after tweet telling us you love our work when you have just stolen it, keep quiet.

Respect our Limits!

In my mind the most important one, respect our limits.

If you have lots of money, well done to you. But that doesn’t mean you can make us do whatever, just because you’re wealthy. Each individual sex worker has their own limits, so respect them.

If they don’t want to do something, ask someone else. Better yet, research if they will do what you want before you ask – this comes back to the point number one.

I wish I didn’t have to include this point every single time I talk about porn, but I do. If you want us to carry on our work, keep producing high-quality clips, you have to pay.

Pirating is so common now that we barely make the money back on the clip we just made. That is not a stable business model. If this keeps happening, people are going to stop producing,

You pay go to the cinema, eat, and have drinks with your friends, so why don’t you pay for your porn?

I know some reason that they don’t want to go looking for porn, when they want to jack off they want to jack off. In that case, why don’t you look at porn some other time, and start a collection. Find pieces you want to watch when you masturbate. Some say it’s pointless to buy just for 10 minutes, but you’re going to look at that clip time and time again as you’ve brought back clip so you can look at it time and time again.

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You’ll notice that a lot of these come down to money, but that’s because it’s porn, it sex work, it’s a transactional business that without money wouldn’t exist. There are amateur porn performers who make videos just a fun, and that’s fine. You can find a lot of those on PornHub – just to make sure it’s a verified account, and nowadays a lot of your favourite performers even upload some of their videos or teasers to PornHub. For a lot of us though, it’s our job. So, if you’re watching porn that hasn’t been released by the model, you’re most likely watching stolen porn.