Thursday, August 12, 2010

MY BROTHER LIVES!

After putting my daughter to bed tonight I cried.
Just as I was closing the door she said "Goodnight Daddy I love you"

It is really rough for me to come to the realization that my best friend YNOT will never see his niece ever again to tell her good night and witness that first hand or better yet his own son. Yesterday she was drawing a picture and she told me "Daddy I'm drawing a picture of Baby Max!" and without me saying anything she said "And his mommy Angel and his daddy Unckie" Immediately I broke down. I know she is starting to understand. With everyone crying around her a 3 year old can ketch on quite quickly. She's no dummy.

We have spent so many good times together as a family. With YNOT living in my back yard I always had an outlet to blow off some steam or just plain kick it. With lots of homies there or just him it didn't matter. Sometimes I would come back there 3-4 times a night waiting for everyone to leave. With intentions of catching him alone. There was nothing else more therapeutic (after a long days of work) then hanging with him solo, one on one. Turn the Waka Flocka down and converse for hours. About our kids playing together when we get older, Graffiti talk, sometimes I would give him girl advice, and life. The homie was a GENIUS! But human, he was not perfect and constantly needed guidance. I would try to teach him things through experiences I had been through earlier in life, and he would listen. He would teach me many of things as well. Like how to get the fullest of life, and how to go after your dreams, and don't give a shit of what people had to say. Determination! That is one of the many things that me and this kid 6 years younger then me had in common.

Ynot,

I owe you everything! If it wasn't for you I would not have a beautiful wife and kids. I probably would have gone back to drugs and ruined my life. That first day when ST introduced us outside of Cronies Bar in Pembroke Pines, all I was wondering was "Wow this is a little kid, Why are these 19-22 year old dudes hanging with this little shit?" Not much later to find out how amazing this 12 year old kid really was!! Luckily we didn't' go in. You probably would have got our asses kicked out.

That was history, Graffiti history, Life history!!!

We both we were at that point in our lives where we needed, for me someone to look after and for you some guidance and direction. And it was perfect! From that point on you were mine (PAUSE). Not long after that we both focused on our common ground together through graffiti. Determination!

Billboards, remember our first billboard? In Hialeah on the 826. We did hallows with thin shadow. WOW. LOL. Listening to Cormega albums back to back. Yeah, those were the 7S days. Then later realizing we really had no rank to be pushing that crew. Toys with Determination! LOL

Luckily the people around us embraced our dedication and passion. Because everyone else hated us. Its funny looking back. We came a far way, but you were always the more talented one. When Doper use to ask you to push MSG and you said "Not without my homie Dose! We're a package deal"

Chase stories. We have so many. Although running from the police was not you strong point.

The crew is torn without you. Not the same. Never the same! You played your role and it cant be filled. I hate seeing RIP YNOT's! It kills me. We were supposed to raise our kids together. Your tattoos were starting to get better and better. The last 2 weeks before you passed I started to see a major change in your mentality. You were becoming a man and I was so proud. It's so fucked up how I feel right now. Everyone tells me it was meant to be and I will never believe that. How could g-d take someone so harmless and beautiful. I'm having a real hard time. For the past 2 weeks I cant work, function, be a father and husband for my family because all I can think of is you and not having you anymore. Look at me now 2 whole weeks later and I'm just now putting together a post. I'm sorry homie. I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you like I always told your mom I would. Fuck!

BUCK50! We were proud! All because of Determination. When me and Care came up with the name over a silly conversation, it was on!! All we needed was another excuse to go fuck shit up. Remember the West Palm sound wall? And the 595 Trailer, and countless others? Then we started finally turning some heads. You are the foundation. Back in the "tagging wagon" days. With the RRRRAAAPPPAAAAUUUULLLAAAAA!!!!!!! Thats crew shit. You looked up to me and felt safe through all the stupid beef. I would never take it back. Not in a million years!!

When I got back from ATLANTA we had some major catching up to do. What better way to do it then convince you to move in with me. Convincing you was easy for me tho, as you did anything I told you without a bat of an eye. You trusted me. And I did you as well (PAUSE). You watched my daughter quite frequently. And she loves you!! Every time she is in the backyard she would go bang on your sliding glass door "Unkie?!" Im SURE she will remember you. I wont let her forget. You wont either, with your reminders all over my house.

Brother, I want you to know that just as I looked out for you throughout some of the rough times in your life, Max A Million will be straight! I will teach him Determination. I GOT HIM, and your mom and grandma.

You would be proud right now. The streets are running from West Palm to the Keys, like the good old days homie. And its only begun. You are up and alive!

KING YNOTSE LIVES FOREVER!!

YNOT DOSE FOREVER!!

I LOVE YOU LIL BRO, SAY HI TO REASON!!!

GOODBYE. : (

Uncle YNOT with my daughter when she was a baby.

Buk50 Sketch by YNOT. When we put Edge down. Peep the horns!

595 Trailer

First Highway Sign

Ft. Lauderdale airport. You could see this upon arrival from the window of the airplane

DAM!!!! WELL SAID TO WHOEVER WROTE THAT...I BEEN CHECKING UP ON THIS WEBSITE 4 A HOT MINUTE...AND I GOTTA SAY IT'S GOOD TO SEE POST LIKE THIS...IT JUST LETS YOU KNOW WHAT THIS DUDE(YNOT) MEANT TO EVERYBODY AND THE WHOLE CREW...AND WITH POST AND PICTURES LIKE THIS ON THE SITE JUST GIVES ME AN INSIDE LOOK OF WHAT THIS FAMILY(MSG.28.B50) REALLY STANDS 4..."LOYALTY AND RESPECT"...BUT MOST OF ALL KEEPIN IT 200 ALL THE TIME!!! I KNOW A FEW OF YOU BOYS FROM THE CREW BUT NEVER THE LIL HOMIE(YNOT)..BUT FROM THE LOOKS OF IT ALL SOUNDS LIKE HOMIE WAS A GOOD DUDE WHO LOVED WRITING AND PUTTING HIS NAME OUT THERE AND WHO WAS JUST FINDING OUT WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO BE A FATHER AND A MAN BUT NEVER WILL ENJOY THE RIDE AND THE EXPERIENCE OF BIENG A FATHER...DAM!! I CAN ONLY IMAGINE HOW ALOT OF YOU FEEL IT TRULY IS ONE OF THE WORST FEELINGZ A PERSON CAN FEEL..ITS EMOTIONALLY DRAINFUL!TO THE PERSON WROTE STATEMENT AND THE WHOLE'MSG.28 YA'LL BOYS KEEP YO HEAD UP AND GOD BLESS YA'LL!!!AND THANKS FOR SHARING THIS WITH EVERYONE IM SURE THIS SITE IS A HEALING PROCESS FOR YOU GUYS AS WELL!!!!!!!!!!!

Stay strong Dose, and keep on expressing yourself homie, it will help some. You have an incredible family in your crews that surround you and the everlasting memories of a wonderful life that you had a huge positive impact on. Lean on'em, lean on each other. You have a strong heart and w/o knowing you I can tell you're a good person, stay strong big dog. YNOT wouldn't have it any other way.

I'll never forget meeting you guys at Esons crib back in the days, you mutha fuckas was so hungry, so wrapped up in graff that shit really reminded me of myself when I linked up with crome.

I remember trying to be giving you guys advice and just trying to support what you guys had going.

You guys were 100% self made, and went from some broward toys to all city kings quick. Dade, Broward, West Palm, ATL, all that shit got smashed by Ynot and Dose.

We went from some total strangers to really good friends really quick. Catching that flat on my way movning outta town was one of the best things that ever happened me, getting stuck on 95 in broward right next to your crib, ended up running around with you homies all night, playing basketball at like 4 in the morning whooping you and Ynots ass nigga! I remember when I used to always call him THE PROFESSOR from And 1 cuz that lil nigga could ball and looked just like him.

Man no homo but I fell in love with you guys just like all the rest of the homies did. 2 crazy young stand up dudes that didnt give a fuck about nothing, and left a mark on south florida graff that is undeniable.

I watched you guys come up in this game, and over time you both just became family. I love you like a brother and I feel the pain of your loss everyday homie. I know how important Ynot was to you, im sorry he isnt here but im glad we had him in our lives for as long as we did.

Its hard not to smile when I think about him, he was just such a cool as kid man, he was such an amazing person and i never really fully understood that until we lost him, he was really special, and that had alot to do with your guidence over the years.

You guys really embody what crew is all about. Just catching each others back, helping each other and always down to ride out all night long, and just willing to do anything for each other.

Just know homie every last one of us has your back and ynots back since way back, and will continue that for the rest of our lives.

Its shit like this that bonds us for life.

I'm really proud of you, my girl is really proud of you, youve handled all of this crazy shit like a man. I'm proud to be you and ynots friends man.

Keep your head up high, we all love you, we all got your back and we will NEVER let Ynots name die.

Yo Dose, Keep ya head up and pursuing ya dreams cuz you got a homie up there gonna look out for you....I know I cant bee down there to help in anyway but I know what youre going through....This is like a flashback to the past and what we went through when SEGE passed on..NES...and eventhough I personally never met him, the crew had to deal with BENO passing on, So history repeats itself...another brother gone and taken away ....way before theyre time. But as you know...we've kept them alive in everything we do till this day...and YNOT is now with them....MSG KINGS looking down at the crew! The streets gonna keep him alive and so are we. It aint a easy thing we gotta go through sometimes but keep strong and lets celebrate the good times we had with'em. MTX

yo dose.. i am impress of your express for ynot... that true what you say ..about it was meant to be .. it never meant to be..he be missed by many.. i being doing graffiti since 1983 not much of bombing cuz i am handicapp but graffiti run in my blood and i did my upmost got bomb i did much getting up by stickers and all going to penit. with some memeber of f.s. and B.s.k... Yo word i remember the first time i remember seen a dose and ynot popin up my first place was on griffin rd. then appear to some restroom in davie around.then hitting the street you 2 got it running ...dose and ynot I was impress with style of it own...dose hope you keep going dont let it stop you. you can keep his name alive peace yo hope someday we meet so take care

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