11 Comments to “Goat Kills Kid”

Believe it or not, the following is the unembroidered truth of something that actually happened (or actually, didn’t happen) to a young goat.
Not so many years ago – well, OK, 30 years ago if you must know – my friend Chris was making his way out his back door, trusty .22 rifle in hand, on a mission to murder a young goat, and have it for dinner. He stumbled on a loose board, which caused him to lose his grip on the gun, which then cartwheeled to the ground, hitting it stock first, whereupon the gun discharged and sent a bullet clean through the calf of his leg.
When I visited him a few days later, we discussed whether this could have been a case of karma in advance…
About two months after that, I saw Chris again at the local progress association meeting. I was astonished to see Chris still on crutches, and the leg still bandaged up.
“That’s taking while to heal”, I observed.
“Well, um… No” he replied. “This is actually the other leg”
A few days earlier, Chris had been once again making his way out the back door, trusty .22 rifle in had, on a mission to murder the same young goat. As he approached the back step, he tightened his grip on the stock of the gun, determined not to repeat his mistake. However, as he descended the step, the slight jar of his footfall travelled up through his tensed muscles, and transmitted the jolt to the gun. The jolt proved to be just sufficient to cause the barrel to break free of its decayed fixings, and part company with stock. The barrel cartwheeled to the ground, striking it at precisely the right angle to send a bullet through his other calf.
The goat survived.

I don’t know why anyone would want to eat goat, anyway. For several years, I had wanted to try ‘curry goat’, a Jamaican dish. Then somebody I was working with made me some last year. I was most disappointed, as I found the meat to be very sweet, when I expected it to taste something like lamb.

It’s quite common for people living in appartment blocks to keep animals on the roof prior to sacrificing them on the Eid. Seriously, I hope this father and his family can gain comfort from their religion. If that happened to one of my kids, I think I would lose my mind with grief.