There's vacations from hell, and then there's the disaster that is the Carnival cruiseship. In case you haven't heard, as of now, about 4,200 people are stranded in the Gulf of Mexico due to a fire that broke out in the engine room on Sunday, killing the power system. People stuck aboard the ship have used their cellphones, which have spotty service, to describe the current conditions, and let me tell you: It's absolutely awful.

Apparently, the entire ship reeks, as there's, um, sewage running down the walls and urinein the carpets. Most people can't shower, and since there's no air conditioning, many have resorted to sleeping in tents on the deck. The lines for food -- which are reportedly rowdy -- are around four hours long, and a few nights ago for dinner, "vacationers" were forced to eat cold onion sandwiches. Thursday, the ship is supposed to reach its new destination: Mobile, Alabama.

Some passengers, or those close to passengers on board, claim that people are "turning into savages", and say that instead of toilets, bags are being used to go to the bathroom. Carnival Cruise Lines president and CEO, Gerry Cahill, said: "All guests on the current Carnival Triumph voyage will receive a full refund for the cruise, along with transportation expenses. In addition, they will receive a future cruise credit equal to the amount paid for this voyage, as well as reimbursement of all shipboard purchases during the voyage, with the exception of gift shop and casino charges."

Um, yeah, not sure that's gonna cut it, Cahill. And also not sure any of the guests are going to want to vacation with Carnival again. I mean, how is there no backup backup backup plan for something like this? These poor people are floating in the middle of the lawless seas right now. And they're crapping all over the place! You're going to have to do a little better than "cruise credit equal to the amount paid for the voyage."

Cruise ships have always freaked me out. No thanks on not seeing land for hundreds of miles. And after the Costa Concordia last year; the lifeboat accident that left five dead this week; and this -- I can't really see myself taking one. Here's to hoping this nightmare ends soon for these poor people.