Well, no hangover here. Pedro’s dream of a miracle upset is crushed as his girls manage to rip off a whopping 0 against MHD. But hey, good job on the two ties, and just keep repeating the words “moral victories”.

MHD wins 8-0

MATCH-UP #2: LUKE VS. KRUEGPrediction: Krueg wins 6-4

After having his April 17 drunken celebration stolen by his over-reacting wife, Krueg’s focus just wasn’t there this week. But a strong showing Sat. on the golf course re-energized him, allowing his team to put up a fight, but it was just too little too late.

Luke wins 5-3

MATCH-UP #3: STRODE VS. PATE

Prediction: Pate wins 6-3

I think we have found where the “post Pate hangover” ended up. Square on Pate’s head. With Ang being out of town this weekend, Strode is able to put together a miracle rally and salvage his sure loss. The Goat is alive and kicking.

Tie 4-4 (Hell, even the NHL got rid of ties)

MATCH-UP #4: GIBBY VS. TIM

Prediction: Gibby wins 5-4

Gibby’s offense dominates, while Tim’s pitching just manages to keep his team close. I always wondered who would be the pitcher, and who would be the catcher out of those two.

Tim pitches, but still loses 6-4

MATCH-UP #5: PAUL VS. ANDY

Prediction: Andy wins 7-2

Well, I would talk shit about Paul, but it just seems like a waste of time. Andy treats him the same way he does his sister.

Andy wins 6-4

MATCH-UP #6: PHIL VS. DUKE

Prediction: Duke wins 5-4

Well, welcome back to earth, dukie. Even with a decent week, the kiddies from Earlsboro get put in their proper place, managing only one more victory than the inept “Bad” Mutha Fuckers. One win is better than a shutout, in about the same way as blowing a white dude is better than a mexican. In the end you are still a cocksucker…

Phil wins 7-1

MATCH-UP #7: MANTIS VS. JIMMY

Prediction: Jimmy wins 7-3

Jimmy’s fear of the bear claw is just too much, causing his team to hold back just enough to allow Mantis to eek out a victory. You’re lucky you’re a big mofo…

Mantis wins 5-4

MATCH-UP #8: LACKEY VS. DICKMAN

Prediction: Dickman wins 6-4

Like watching a monkey try to fuck a football. Dickman teaches Lackey just exactly how the Dirty Sanchez is applied.

Pedro could be in a very good or very bad situation here. If he can catch MHD in a post-Pate hangover, he could run away with a surprise victory and establish himself as a team that will be in it to win it throughout the season. However, if MHD brings some sort of wrath after losing such a close match-up, Pedro may be rendered powerless. Based on the numbers, Pedro doesn’t have much of a chance. But he has had some success against MHD in the past.
Prediction: MHD wins 7-3MATCH-UP #2: LUKE VS. KRUEG

After an embarrassing loss in week one, Krueg rebounded strongly in week two. Luke’s been struggling now for about 3 years and it’s probably not going to change this week. A post tax day hangover could distract Krueg, but he should still win this one fairly easily.
Prediction: Krueg wins 6-4

MATCH-UP #3: STRODE VS. PATE

Strode is down, and Pate is up. The hottest team in the MML dating back to last season doesn’t look to let up this week, although Strode can put together some solid offensive stats. Given Pate’s early season pitching woes and Strode’s ability to at least hang in there offensively, this one could turn out to be the match-up of the week. But don’t be surprised if Pate kicks the shit out of Strode either.
Prediction: Pate wins 6-3

MATCH-UP #4: GIBBY VS. TIM

This should be an interesting battle. Two of the Bachelors’ upper-mid-level teams primed and ready for a break-out year facing off early in the season will be a great opportunity to make themselves noticed. Although I worry that if Gibby can’t completely dominate this league when Albert is hot, I don’t know what he will do when Albert cools down, Gibby still has the better team and should squeak out a win this week.
Prediction: Gibby wins 5-4

MATCH-UP #5: PAUL VS. ANDY

Again I ask, whatever happened to Paul? Andy brings his perennial all-stars in to face a team who’s trying to redefine his dominance… or should I say dignity… after putting the league to shame in his first two years. Paul’s got the tools to pull a good upset, and he’s going to need it this week, or else Andy will roll all over him like his balls rolled all over Paul’s sisters chin.
Prediction: Andy wins 7-2

MATCH-UP #6: PHIL VS. DUKE

Is this the week that Phil starts paying attention and Duke’s players come back down to earth? Even attention on Phil’s part may only result in a small victory, and with the roll that Duke’s on so far, he’s got the edge. Duke will win this match-up but don’t be surprised if this one turns out to be a blow-out in Phil’s favor.
Prediction: Duke wins 5-4

MATCH-UP #7: MANTIS VS. JIMMY

Jimmy’s paying attention this year and it’s beginning to show. Mantis has gotten off to a slow start, and until he turns it around, it would be hard to pick him to win over anyone other than Pedro and Paul. Jimmy should win this one handily, but don’t be surprised if Mantis comes up with a big week puts Jimmy in his place.
Prediction: Jimmy wins 7-3

MATCH-UP #8: LACKEY VS. DICKMAN

This one should be interesting if you enjoy watching car crashes that occur at about 2 miles per hour and still result in someone being carted off in a gurney. The good news for them is that one or both of them should end the week somewhere near the middle or top of their division. And the good news for the rest of the league is that you should be able to count most of their stats on your hands.
Prediction: Dickman wins 6-4