June 9, 2014 by Ryan Nickum | Lists
Which Springfield Is Most Like The Springfield On “The Simpsons”
springfield-mapblog2 America’s favorite animated TV family “The Simpsons” reside in the fictional city of Springfield. The show’s fans have long debated which of America’s many Springfields is the true one, an argument that continues to this day. Without any hope of solving this, Estately Real Estate Search instead set out to determine which of America’s Springfields “The Simpsons” would feel most at home in. To do this, Estately analyzed 11 different sets of Simpson-specific data to determine which American cities named Springfield are most like the one on the TV show.
Donut shops per capita: “Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?” —Homer Simpson
Bars per capita: “To alcohol! The cause, and solution, to all of life’s problems.” —Homer Simpson
Clowns and comic book stores per capita: “Go off the air while I’m still good? That horse has left the stable, gone to the glue factory and has been used to make art projects.” -Krusty the Clown
Mini-marts per capita: “Yes, yes. I am familiar with the standard hold-up procedure.” —Apu Nahasapeemapetilon
Residents per capita with the same last name as characters on the Simpsons: Flanders, Riviera, Quimby, Gumble, Lovejoy, McClure, Muntz, Szyslak, Bouvier, Burns, and Skinner.
Residents named “Simpson”: There are many Simpsons, but the only Homer Simpson listed in the White Pages lives in Springfield, Illinois.
Proximity to a nuclear power plant: “Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just need to read the manual and press the right button.” —Homer Simpson
Local business named “Moe’s” that serves beer: “And now, because it’s after noon, I can go to Moe’s without having a drinking problem” — Homer Simpson
Local TV news reporter most resembling Kent Brockman: “I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.” —Kent Brockman
Local law allows schools to issue corporal punishment: “Talking out of turn…that’s a paddling. Looking out the window…that’s a paddling. Staring at my sandals…that’s a paddling. Paddling the school canoe…ooh, you better believe that’s a paddling.” —Jasper Beardly
Frequency of Google searches for “Homer Simpson”: “Homer, from what I hear you waltz in at 10:30, take a nap on the toilet, then sit around Googling your own name until lunch.” —Marge Simpson
Springfield-chart In the end, Springfield, Missouri was found to be the most similar to the Springfield on the show, and the least similar was surprisingly Springfield, Oregon. Check out profiles of each city below…
1. Springfield, Missouri
Snapshot 6:4:14 1:34 PMSpringfield, Missouri is the most populous of America’s Springfields, and easily won the title of “Most Similar Simpsons City Named Springfield”. The central Illinois city has the most Charles Burns in the phone book, the most mini-marts, comic book stores and clowns per capita, and Steve Grant, a local TV news reporter that most resembles Kent Brockman. Also, even though it’s not home to the Springfield Isotopes, the city is the only one on our list with a minor league baseball team—the Springfield Cardinals.
2. Springfield, Massachusetts
Best-simpsons-gifs-homer-donuts Homer Simpson would be very happy in Springfield, Massachusetts. Not only because it’s ranked highly in most of the eleven criteria, but also because it’s home to 20 Dunkin’ Donuts locations. Mmmh… donuts.
3. Springfield, Illinois
Snapshot 6:4:14 4:20 PM Of all the Springfields, Illinois’ is the closest (59.3 miles) to neighboring a city named Shelbyville, the rival of the Simpson’s home town. On top of that, it has the second most comic book stores and clowns, bars, and is in the state with the highest frequency of Google searches for “Homer Simpson”. Also, it’s apparently home to a Troy McClure. You might remember him from such phone books as the Springfield, Illinois White Pages.
4. Springfield, Pennsylvania
Snapshot 6:4:14 2:02 PM There are more residents per capita with the last name “Simpson” in this city than any other Springfield so the odds are strong that at least one of them is working at the nuclear power plant 35 miles down the road. Even better, it’s home to Moe’s Grille, which offers “$1 Duff mugs from 5-7pm. Regrettably, there is no “Flaming Moe’s” on the cocktail menu.
5. Springfield, Ohio
Snapshot 6:4:14 4:02 PM-2 Thanks to an abundance of residents sharing names with characters on The Simpsons, the odds of electing a Mayor Quimby or receiving detention from a Principal Skinner are considerably higher in Springfield, Ohio. You might even meet your own Barney Gumble at one of Springfield’s many bars per capita.
6. Springfield, Tennessee
tumblr_loaotcBpBe1qztjn5o1_500 There’s a Shelbyville down the road about 83 miles, local schools still reserve the right to paddle students, and it’s home to the fourth most mini-marts per capita. Good luck bumping into any Krusty the Clown types though. The city has zero clowns listed in the National Clown Directory.
7. Springfield, Vermont
duff_feature.gif Vermont’s Springfield hosted the premier of The Simpson’s Movie, which was accompanied by the limited release Ben & Jerry’s “Duff ‘n D’Oh-Nuts”, a stout-flavored ice cream with chocolate and chocolate-glazed donuts. The city is tops for donut shops per capita and it’s located just 44 miles from a nuclear power plant. Maybe if the town started celebrating Whacking Day it could move up a few spots on the list?
8. Springfield, Michigan
chalkboard For a small city, bars and mini-marts are plentiful (per capita), and it seems like a good spot for a Krusty Burger to open up shop.
9. Springfield, Virginia
Two_Cars_in_Every_Garage_and_Three_Eyes_on_Every_Fish With an abundance of donuts per capita (2nd place) and a nuclear power plant just down the road, Springfield, Virginia bares a strong resemblance to the TV Springfield. Also, it’s close the heavily polluted Potomac River, which is ideal habitat for Blinky, the three eyed fish.
10. Springfield, Oregon
No TV and no beer makes Homer go crazy, so this Springfield’s lack of bars (7th place) would be troubling, although there is a Moe’s Tavern conveniently located within the city limits. However, the city is low on donut shops (9th), has no TV anchor even faintly resembling Kent Brockman, and it’s a five-hour commute each way to the nearest nuclear power plant.
- – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – -
Estately is a national online real estate search site whose articles have been featured in the The Wall Street Journal, CNET, NPR, Houston Chronicle, NBC News, GeekWire, and more.

R E C E N T . . . C O M M E N T S

Video:

Springfield Vermont News is an ongoing zero-income volunteer hyperlocal news gathering project. No paid advertising is accepted on this site but any Springfield business willing to place a link to this news blog on their site will be considered for a free ad here. Businesses, organizations and individuals may submit write-ups and photos about any positive happenings here in Springfield that they are associated with and would be deemed newsworthy. Email the Editor at ed44vt@gmail.com.

Privacy statement: This blog does not share personal information with third parties nor do we store any information about your visit to this blog other than to analyze and optimize your content and reading experience through the use of cookies. You can turn off the use of cookies at anytime by changing your specific browser settings. We are not responsible for republished content from this blog on other blogs or websites without our permission. This privacy policy is subject to change without notice and was last updated on January 1, 2017. If you have any questions feel free to contact Springfield Vermont News directly here: ed44vt@gmail.com.