Real Estate

You Can Now Score a Rental Property with a View of . . . William and Kate’s House

Imagine this: you’re on the couch. The Friends rerun you were watching just ended and now the local news is on. You don’t have the energy to stand up and turn it off, so you just blithely scroll on your phone while the newscasters go on about a local robbery. You reach into the bowl in front of you and unwrap some days-old candy. You hear a noise outside. It’s probably nothing, you think, maybe a strong breeze knocked over a lawn chair. Wait, though . . . that would be crazy if a breeze was strong enough to knock over a lawn chair! So you stand up and shuffle over to the window to see what’s going on, and, lo and behold, there’s Prince George, on a tricycle, careening around the yard. “Sorry!” Kate, chasing a few yards behind him, yells, with a wave. “He escaped into your yard!” You nod and laugh, overdoing it to make it clear you really don’t mind, finally mouthing, “No, worries, Kate,” and returning to your couch.

This could be your real, actual life!

Per Us Weekly, there are now two rental properties available on the Sandringham Estate in Norfolk, England. Both abodes have delightfully British names—the Garden House and the Granary—and one of them, that Garden House, “overlooks” Prince William and Kate Middleton’s country home, the Sandringham House. Yes, at all times (well, at all times Kate is at home), her hair would be within yards of you; can you imagine the effects that would have on your skin?!?! You’d be positively glowing within weeks.

Both properties are available to the public to rent. The Garden House (which includes “twin bedrooms, one double bedroom, two bathrooms, a sitting room, a dining room, a kitchen, and a coatroom,” just enough for some solid Downton Abbey cosplaying) goes for about $975 per week. Understandably, the Granary, which does not feature royal-family views (though it does have three bedrooms, each with its own ensuite bathroom), goes for a slightly lower amount (about $935 per week).

FEBRUARY 2014

We begin our tour with the National Portrait Gallery, where Kate made her first appearance of the year at the portrait gala. While Kate wore a Jenny Packham gown which she had worn once before, a disappointment to many who were hoping for a new gown to start off the year, her hair—in cascading locks—thrilled. A check-plus start, in fourth-grade-book-report terms, to the year. (Also, let’s just say there is a chance you may be seeing this gown YET AGAIN later on in this slideshow—who knew our journey would be filled with such suspense?!)

Photo: By Niki Nikolova/GC Images.

MARCH 2014

Kate mixed things up at the St. Patrick’s Day parade this year, opting for a green Hobbs Persephone coat, as opposed to the Emilia Wickstead she had worn the two years prior (this is the royal equivalent of a Hollywood actor showing up to a premiere in a sheer jumpsuit, basically). And look at the vivid hue of this hair!

Photo: By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

APRIL 2014

This is what this woman looks like getting off an England-to-New-Zealand (!) flight: her hair casually blowing in the breeze underneath a red Gina Foster hat, while George casually chills in one arm. She should win a medal for this look, is what we’re trying to say.

Photo: By Samir Hussein/WireImage.

APRIL 2014

DECEMBER 2014

We are still in disbelief that we were actually present to see this pony tail in person. Our thoughts about it have been well-discussed elsewhere, but suffice it to say, objectively speaking, there are no pony tails that ever have or ever will rival this one. (We’re near the end of this journey; please cut us some slack.)

DECEMBER 2014

Remember at the beginning of this slideshow when we said you’d be seeing that Jenny Packham dress again. Well here it is! Kate wore it for the final stop of her New York tour, at the Met, though this time she styled her hair up, and opted for some flashy earrings. We want to think that she was consciously bringing the year full-circle, beginning and ending 2014 with the same formal dress. Time is a flat, uh, evening gown.

Photo: By Samir Hussein/Pool/WireImage.

DECEMBER 2014

But the last look we are going to show also happens to be one of our favorites: Kate in a hoodie, looking marvelous. While our hair generally looks like Monica-Gellar-in-Barbados whenever we venture outside in this sort of post-gym outfit, Kate’s looks fancy-wedding-appropriate. She is truly a marvel.

Photo: From Rex USA/David Hartley/Rex.

FEBRUARY 2014

We begin our tour with the National Portrait Gallery, where Kate made her first appearance of the year at the portrait gala. While Kate wore a Jenny Packham gown which she had worn once before, a disappointment to many who were hoping for a new gown to start off the year, her hair—in cascading locks—thrilled. A check-plus start, in fourth-grade-book-report terms, to the year. (Also, let’s just say there is a chance you may be seeing this gown YET AGAIN later on in this slideshow—who knew our journey would be filled with such suspense?!)

By Niki Nikolova/GC Images.

MARCH 2014

Kate mixed things up at the St. Patrick’s Day parade this year, opting for a green Hobbs Persephone coat, as opposed to the Emilia Wickstead she had worn the two years prior (this is the royal equivalent of a Hollywood actor showing up to a premiere in a sheer jumpsuit, basically). And look at the vivid hue of this hair!

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

APRIL 2014

This is what this woman looks like getting off an England-to-New-Zealand (!) flight: her hair casually blowing in the breeze underneath a red Gina Foster hat, while George casually chills in one arm. She should win a medal for this look, is what we’re trying to say.

APRIL 2014

Not to get too poetic, but Kate’s hair looks like a cool spring day here, no? Like, the kind of day where you meet up with your friend at 2 p.m. but don’t really have any concrete plans so you wander around and get coffee and people-watch for a while and before you know it, it’s been, like, five hours and you decide to walk home instead of taking the subway since it’s that nice.

By Chris Jackson/Getty Images.

APRIL 2014

This was Kate on the last day of her Down Under tour, and, hair-wise, she arguably saved the best for last. There is some verifiable art featured on the back of her head.

Both by Arthur Edwards/Pool/Getty Images.

MAY 2014

About a month after the Australia/New Zealand tour came to an end, Kate emerged once again, in Scotland. Her hair here seemed to say, “Missed me? Was your life devoid of meaning without me in your life for a month? Well, here I am, resplendent as ever, bringing you back to life.” (Yikes, we aren’t even half-way through this slideshow and we are already personifying her hair to a borderline-creepy extent.)

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

JUNE 2014

Kate went for an unkempt (for her) hair look for her grandmother-in-law’s birthday parade, which is still, like, leagues more put-together than anything you’d see at a formal birthday party in New York, or any similar event. In fact, we kind of dig the easy-breezy nonchalance: “Yeah, she’s the Queen, but, to me, she’s just, you know, grandma.”

By Mark Cuthbert/UK Press via Getty Images.

JUNE 2014

Kate’s Father’s Day look was one we’ve seen many a time (she wears that Breton-style top to casual, sporting-ish events as often as we wear flannel pants when we’re inside our apartment—which is to say, essentially all the time). Her hair—outfitted here with chic sunglasses and a gleeful grin—is immaculate.

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

JULY 2014

The word “delightful” gets used a lot these days, but that is truly the word for the range of faces Kate made at Wimbledon this year. Perhaps overshadowed by her expressive countenance is the subtle curls action going on in re: her tresses. (Also: that woman behind her looks glum because she is contemplating, as we all must at one point or another, that we will never have Kate’s hair as our own.)

By Karwai Tang/WireImage.

JULY 2014

Photographed here at the finish line of the first stage of the Tour de France, Kate . . . well, we barely need to finish this caption (you should have a good read on us by now), but let’s just say we’d imagine the prize for whoever won was less being in first place after stage one of the Tour de France but more that he was the first person to get to see Kate Middleton I.R.L..

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

JULY 2014

Kate’s hair was not, of course, the main draw in this shot, one of the three photos released on the occasion of Prince George’s first birthday. But this is a good moment to note that, even when it (“it” being, here, “her hair”) knows it’s not the central event, there is still nary a strand out of place or a discernible flaw of any kind.

By John Stillwell/AFP/Getty Images.

AUGUST 2014

At a service of remembrance in honor of the 100th anniversary of World War 1, it would appear from the front that Kate has a pretty straight-forward hair situation going on. But, from the back, we see, there are all sorts of lovely machinations at play.

AUGUST 2014

This is the last time Kate was photographed before her pregnancy was announced. The combination of (a) the contrast of the red poppies with the blue outfit, (b) the bounciness of her locks, and (c) the knowledge that she no doubt knew she was pregnant here and it was her (and William’s, presumably) secret and no one else knew . . . well, if you’re not slightly smiling right now, then, uh, it takes a lot to make you slightly smile.

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

OCTOBER 2014

After nearly two months of rest, during which she suffered from acute morning sickness, Kate re-emerged for a parade. As if there was any doubt as to its prowess, her hair (and the person it is attached to, as well) was in top-notch form (a casual ponytail was in order), as if to say, “I’m back, y’all.” (Note: we do not actually believe Kate, or her hair, has ever uttered the word “y’all.”)

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

OCTOBER 2014

Where is the superhero movie about Kate Middleton’s hair, we ask you.

By Samir Hussein/WireImage.

NOVEMBER 2014

Come on. She’s just strolling in a coat in Wales (after battling severe morning sickness, for months, keep in mind!!), and yet manages to look like she’s walked right off of a Vogue cover.

By Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images.

NOVEMBER 2014

Kate went with the rare updo for the Royal Variety Performance, where she met another Brit whose hair has a giant mythology built up around it, Harry Styles. Whose hair would win a hair-off? We’re clearly biased, but, if you think Kate’s hair is superior, clap your hands softly, royal-like, three times. If you think Harry’s hair wins out, do one of those bro-y head nods at your laptop.

By Yui Mok/WPA Pool/Getty Images.

DECEMBER 2014

Arriving in New York for her first visit to the Big Apple, the pressure was on for Kate, sartorially and follically. And she set a high bar for herself upon her arrival at the Carlyle Hotel, sporting an especially vivacious hair look. She was not messing around.

DECEMBER 2014

DECEMBER 2014

Meeting Beyoncé, from a hair perspective, is like putting a drawing you made up next to the Mona Lisa. But, of course, that is also what matching up hair-wise with Kate is like. We will say, diplomatically, that all the hair here (on the females, at least) earns exemplary marks.

DECEMBER 2014

We are still in disbelief that we were actually present to see this pony tail in person. Our thoughts about it have been well-discussed elsewhere, but suffice it to say, objectively speaking, there are no pony tails that ever have or ever will rival this one. (We’re near the end of this journey; please cut us some slack.)

DECEMBER 2014

Remember at the beginning of this slideshow when we said you’d be seeing that Jenny Packham dress again. Well here it is! Kate wore it for the final stop of her New York tour, at the Met, though this time she styled her hair up, and opted for some flashy earrings. We want to think that she was consciously bringing the year full-circle, beginning and ending 2014 with the same formal dress. Time is a flat, uh, evening gown.

By Samir Hussein/Pool/WireImage.

DECEMBER 2014

But the last look we are going to show also happens to be one of our favorites: Kate in a hoodie, looking marvelous. While our hair generally looks like Monica-Gellar-in-Barbados whenever we venture outside in this sort of post-gym outfit, Kate’s looks fancy-wedding-appropriate. She is truly a marvel.