Now we have a jar of wonderfully delicious ghee. It took less than 20 minutes and was super easy to make!

Jar of ghee

Melting Butter

Simmering butter/ghee

Golden brown ghee

Some of my fondest childhood memories are cooking with ____ (insert name of food-loving adult family member). Taking our children —especially girls— into the kitchen with us is such a cozy way to spend time.

And wouldn’t a jar of home made ghee be a great gift to know how to give?!

Some people would have you believe —falsely of course— that man began life in caves, were brutish and lacked intelligence. Perhaps, that is the ancestral history of some people.

Others of us, however, believe what has reached us from prophetic sources.

An example is ibn Kathir ad-Damishqi (d. 774 H). In the chapter, “The Story of Adam and Eve” from the book Stories of the Prophet ibn Kathir writes:

“The first of their [Adam and Eve] clothing was from sheep’s wool. He [Adam] separated them and then spun them. After wards, he wove a Jubbah for himself and a dress and headscarf for Eve” (p. 44).

We learn that Adam (alayhe salaam) wore a Jubbah, which is a long outer garment with wide sleeves.

We also learn that Adam:

— needed clothing for himself and his wife
— took responsibility for clothing for his family
— used the wool from sheep
— processed, spun, and wove the sheep’s wool
— wove a woolen loose garment for himself and his wife
— was the first human to produce cloth from sheep wool

My dears, non-Muslim historians, weavers, crocheters/knitters, etc., speculate on the origins of wool for garments, some even connecting imaginary dots to the ancient Romans or Greeks. They speak about things they have no knowledge of.

Real knowledge —authentic, true, accurate knowledge— comes from Islam. Many a folk within the Muslim collective possess a great breadth and depth of knowledge in numerous subject areas, some of which reaches far back into human history.

In the Age of Information, we must avoid being duped by those who seek to unduly influence and exploit women by blurring the lines between real and mis- information. We must take care to distinguish what real “information” actually consists of. And it consists of what has always been the single most important body of knowledge that has ever existed . . . knowledge of your religion!

What is your view concerning the woman who places her picture wearing niqab, even though her face is covered, on the internet forums and other places? Keeping in mind, this is a fitna for the young men.

May Allah bless you.

Answer — Shaykh Haamid ibn Al Khamis Al Junaibee:

You know, I don’t know—Subana Allah—some of the women, what do they want from this? What do they want by uploading these pictures, even those who upload their pictures in which they are wearing niqab, or a woman with her face covered, what does she want from this?

This is not done by someone with insight and wisdom and this is evidence of an ignorant way of thinking. What benefit is gained by uploading a picture of a woman wearing niqab, for example? And the evil is greater if she uploads a picture of herself. It is as though she is saying to them: “Look at me,” whether she is wearing niqab or not; along with the beautification or the eyes and other than that.

I say: My general advice to the women: Fear Allah O women, those who enter the internet forums and internet websites, and the social networking sites such as twitter and the other websites. Fear Allah. Whether addressing the men, or chatting with the men, uploading pictures, and going to great lengths in this matter. This is a great door to evil, the magnitude of it is only known to Allah.

And Allah knows the situation of these affairs based on these forums and websites, from the abundance of evil that occurs from some of the people due to these affairs; whether it is by the private messages, or by connecting through other means, or by sending emails, or other than that from the means that some men use to catch women.

And sometimes it occurs between a man who is religiously committed and a woman who is religiously committed. Fear Allah O daughters of the Muslims!!

*By Allah, surely I know specific people, I know specific people, and I do not say this from the standpoint of mentioning stories and tales, but rather from the standpoint of inciting fear and alarm, this is the standpoint I am coming from. A woman and a man fell into fornication. Both of them were students of knowledge, both of them were students of knowledge. I know them specifically. We ask Allah for safety and security.*

Thus beware, beware—may Allah bless you—beware beware! The person must stay far away from the doors of evil and he must make an escape from them; fleeing.

Whoever needs to connect with someone, whether it is for marriage, or engagement, the connection should occur from the females, from your family, your relatives, from this method. And do not open this door upon yourself! Because this door is a door of evil, such that if it is open it is not about to close except with great evil.

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This is the final part in this series. It seems to be in the form of an analogy.

After reading this, do you feel motivated to raise your children well? And to marry them to someone who has been raised with similar values?

¸.♥´Mom

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published in 1832

Perhaps some will think the evils of which I have been speaking are confined principally to the rich; but I am convinced they extend to all classes of people.

All manual employment is considered degrading; and those who are compelled to do it, try to conceal it.

A few years since, very respectable young men at our colleges, cut their own wood, and blacked their own shoes. Now, how few, even of the sons of plain farmers and industrious mechanics, have moral courage enough to do without a servant; yet when they leave college, and come out into the battle of life, they must do without servants; and in these times it will be fortunate if one half of them get what is called ‘a decent living,’ even by rigid economy and patient toil.

Yet I would not [like] that servile and laborious employment should be forced upon the young. I would merely have each one educated according to his probable situation in life; and be taught that whatever is his duty, is honorable; and that no merely external circumstance can in reality injure true dignity of character.

I would not cramp a boy’s energies by compelling him always to cut wood, or draw water; but I would teach him not to be ashamed, should his companions happen to find him doing either one or the other.

A few days since, I asked a grocer’s lad to bring home some articles I had just purchased at his master’s. The bundle was large; he was visibly reluctant to take it; and wished very much that I should send for it. This, however, was impossible; and he subdued his pride; but when I asked him to take back an empty bottle which belonged to the store, he, with a mortified look, begged me to do it up neatly in a paper, that it might look like a small package.

Is this boy likely to be happier for cherishing a foolish pride, which will forever be jarring against his duties? Is he in reality one whit more respectable than the industrious lad who sweeps stores, or carries bottles, without troubling himself with the idea that all the world is observing his little unimportant self? For, in relation to the rest of the world, each individual is unimportant; and he alone is wise who forms his habits according to his own wants, his own prospects, and his own principles.

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published in 1832

The bride is awakened from her delightful dream, in which carpets, vases, sofas, white gloves, and pearl earrings, are oddly jumbled up with her lover’s looks and promises. Perhaps she would be surprised if she knew exactly how much of the fascination of being engaged was owing to the aforesaid inanimate concern.

Be that as it will, she is awakened by the unpleasant conviction that cares devolve upon her.

And what effect does this produce upon her character? Do the holy and tender influences of domestic love render self-denial and exertion a bliss?

No! They would have done so, had she been properly educated; but now she gives way to unavailing fretfulness and repining; and her husband is at first pained, and finally disgusted, by hearing, ‘I never knew what care was when I lived in my father’s house.’ ‘If I were to live my life over again, I would remain single as long as I could, without the risk of being an old maid.’

How injudicious, how short-sighted is the policy, which thus mars the whole happiness of life, in order to make a few brief years more gay and brilliant!

I have known many instances of domestic ruin and discord produced by this mistaken indulgence of mothers. I never knew but one, where the victim had moral courage enough to change all her early habits.

She was a young, pretty, and very amiable girl; but brought up to be perfectly useless; a rag baby would, to all intents and purposes, have been as efficient a partner. She married a young lawyer, without property, but with good and increasing practice. She meant to be a good wife, but she did not know how.

Her wastefulness involved him in debt.

He did not reproach, though he tried to convince and instruct her.

She loved him; and weeping replied, ‘I try to do the best I can; but when I lived at home, mother always took care of everything.’

Finally, poverty came upon him ‘like an armed man;’ and he went into a remote town in the Western States to teach a school. His wife folded her hands, and cried; while he, weary and discouraged, actually came home from school to cook his own supper.

At last, his patience, and her real love for him, impelled her to exertion. She promised to learn to be useful, if he would teach her.

And she did learn! And the change in her habits gradually wrought such a change in her husband’s fortune, that she might bring her daughters up in idleness, had not experience taught her that economy, like grammar, is a very hard and tiresome study, after we are twenty years old.

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EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published in 1832

The difficulty is, education does not usually point the female heart to its only true resting-place. That dear English word ‘home,’ is not half so powerful a talisman as ‘the world.’ Instead of the salutary truth, that happiness is in duty, they are taught to consider the two things totally distinct; and that whoever seeks one, must sacrifice the other.

The fact is, our girls have no home education. When quite young, they are sent to schools where no feminine employments, no domestic habits, can be learned; and there they continue till they ‘come out’ into the world.

After this, few find any time to arrange, and make use of, the mass of elementary knowledge they have acquired; and fewer still have either leisure or taste for the inelegant, every-day duties of life.

Thus prepared, they enter upon matrimony.

Those early habits, which would have made domestic care a light and easy task, have never been taught, for fear it would interrupt their happiness; and the result is, that when cares come, as come they must, they find them misery. I am convinced that indifference and dislike between husband and wife are more frequently occasioned by this great error in education, than by any other cause.

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published in 1832

In tracing evils of any kind, which exist in society, we must, after all, be brought up against the great cause of all mischief—mismanagement in education; and this remark applies with peculiar force to the leading fault of the present day, viz. [that is to say] extravagance. If young men and young women are brought up to consider frugality contemptible, and industry degrading, it is vain to expect they will at once become prudent and useful, when the cares of life press heavily upon them. Generally speaking, when misfortune comes upon those who have been accustomed to thoughtless expenditure, it sinks them to discouragement, or, what is worse, drives them to desperation.

It is true there are exceptions. There are a few, an honorable few, who, late in life, with Roman severity of resolution, learn the long-neglected lesson of economy. But how small is the number, compared with the whole mass of the population! And with what bitter agony, with what biting humiliation, is the hard lesson often learned! How easily might it have been engrafted on early habits, and naturally and gracefully ‘grown with their growth, and strengthened with their strength!’

Yet it was but lately that I visited a family, not of ‘moderate fortune,’ but of no fortune at all; one of those people who live ‘nobody knows how;’ and I found a young girl, about sixteen, practising on the piano [see note below], while an elderly lady beside her was darning her stockings. I was told (for the mother was proud of bringing up her child so genteelly) that the daughter had almost forgotten how to sew, and that a woman was hired into the house to do her mending!

‘But why,’ said I, ‘have you suffered your daughter to be ignorant of so useful an employment? If she is poor, the knowledge will be necessary to her; if she is rich, it is the easiest thing in the world to lay it aside, if she chooses; she will merely be a better judge whether her work is well done by others.’

‘That is true,’ replied the mother; ‘and I always meant she should learn; but she never has seemed to have any time. When she was eight years old, she could put a shirt together pretty well; but since that, her music [see note below], and her dancing, and her school, have taken up her whole time. I did mean she should learn some domestic habits this winter; but she has so many visiters, and is obliged to go out so much, that I suppose I must give it up. I don’t like to say too much about it; for, poor girl! she does so love company, and she does so hate anything like care and confinement! Now is her time to enjoy herself, you know. Let her take all the comfort she can, while she is single!’

‘But,’ said I, ‘you wish her to marry some time or other; and, in all probability, she will marry. When will she learn how to perform the duties, which are necessary and important to every mistress of a family?’

‘Oh, she will learn them when she is obliged to,’ answered the injudicious mother; ‘at all events, I am determined she shall enjoy herself while she is young.’

And this is the way I have often heard mothers talk!

Yet, could parents foresee the almost inevitable consequences of such a system, I believe the weakest and vainest would abandon the false and dangerous theory. What a lesson is taught a girl in that sentence, ‘Let her enjoy herself all she can, while she is single!’

Instead of representing domestic life as the gathering place of the deepest and purest affections; as the sphere of woman’s enjoyments as well as of her duties; as, indeed, the whole world to her; that one pernicious sentence teaches a girl to consider matrimony desirable because ‘a good match’ is a triumph of vanity, and it is deemed respectable to be ‘well settled in the world;’ but that it is a necessary sacrifice of her freedom and her gayety.

And then how many affectionate dispositions have been trained into heartlessness, by being taught that the indulgence of indolence and vanity were necessary to their happiness; and that to have this indulgence, they must marry money! But who that marries for money, in this land of precarious fortunes, can tell how soon they will lose the glittering temptation, to which they have been willing to sacrifice so much? And even if riches last as long as life, the evil is not remedied. Education has given a wrong end and aim to their whole existence; they have been taught to look for happiness where it never can be found, viz. in the absence of all occupation, or the unsatisfactory and ruinous excitement of fashionable competition.

NOTE: Music is haraam in Islaam. The original text referring to music and piano were not edited out; rather they were scratched through so the original wording could still be seen in order to show the point the author is making by referring to those things. Any waste of one’s time can be substituted for music (such as sports or other activities, or even spending one’s time doing nothing at all).

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published in 1832

But what time do modern girls have for the formation of quiet, domestic habits?

Until sixteen they go to school . . . too often they are spent in acquiring the elements of a thousand sciences, without being thoroughly acquainted with any. As soon as they leave school, (and sometimes before,) they begin a round of balls and parties . . . Dress and flattery take up all their thoughts.

What time have they to learn to be useful? What time have they to cultivate the still and gentle affections, which must, in every situation of life, have such an important effect on a woman’s character and happiness?

As far as parents can judge what will be a daughter’s station, education should be adapted to it; but it is well to remember that it is always easy to know how to spend riches, and always safe to know how to bear poverty.

A superficial acquaintance with such accomplishments as music and drawing is useless and undesirable.

By these remarks I do not mean to discourage an attention to the graces of life. Gentility and taste are always lovely in all situations. But good things, carried to excess, are often productive of bad consequences. When accomplishments and dress interfere with the duties and permanent happiness of life, they are unjustifiable and displeasing; but where there is a solid foundation in mind and heart, all those elegancies are but becoming ornaments.

Making the education of girls such a series of ‘man-traps,’ makes the whole system unhealthy, by poisoning the motive.

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published 1832

One great cause of the vanity, extravagance and idleness that are so fast growing upon our young ladies, is the absence of domestic education.

By domestic education, I do not mean the sending daughters into the kitchen some half dozen times, to weary the patience of the cook, and to boast of it the next day in the parlor.

I mean two or three years spent with a mother, assisting her in her duties, instructing brothers and sisters, and taking care of their own clothes. This is the way to make them happy, as well as good wives; for, being early accustomed to the duties of life, they will sit lightly as well as gracefully upon them.

EDUCATION OF DAUGHTERS

from The American Frugal Housewife
by Mrs. Lydia Maria Child
published 1832

There is no subject so much connected with individual happiness and national prosperity as the education of daughters.

It is a true, and therefore an old remark, that the situation and prospects of a country may be justly estimated by the character of its women; and we all know how hard it is to engraft upon a woman’s character habits and principles to which she was unaccustomed in her girlish days. It is always extremely difficult, and sometimes utterly impossible.

Is the present education of young ladies likely to contribute to their own ultimate happiness, or to the welfare of the country?

There are many honorable exceptions; but we do think the general tone of female education is bad. The greatest and most universal error is, teaching girls to exaggerate the importance of getting married; and of course to place an undue importance upon the polite attentions of gentlemen.

That a mother should wish to see her daughters happily married, is natural and proper; that a young lady should be pleased with polite attentions is likewise natural and innocent; but this undue anxiety, this foolish excitement about showing off the attentions of somebody, no matter whom, is attended with consequences seriously injurious.

[I]t leads them to contract engagements, without any knowledge of their own hearts, merely for the sake of being married as soon as their companions.

When married, they find themselves ignorant of the important duties of domestic life . . . If they remain unmarried, their disappointment and discontent are, of course, in proportion to their exaggerated idea of the eclat attendant upon having a lover.

How many can I at this moment recollect, who have made themselves unhappy by marrying for the sake of the name of being married! How many do I know, who have been instructed to such watchfulness in the game, that they have lost it by trumping their own tricks!

TV - Yes or No? [PDF] The Permanent Committee of Scholars have stated (in a fatwa) that the television is an instrument that in and of itself has no ruling regarding it; rather, the ruling applies to its use -- Dr. Saleh as-Saleh (rahimahullaah)