and the cowboy's wife

Who Am I?

Read a blog last night that has really gotten me to thinking~actually has me feeling emotional and not in a good way…

I’ll have to go back and look at to who’s blog it was and the name of the writing, but my mind in going in circles and I just have to write before doing anything else.

WHO AM I?

Quite the question, yes? Who am I? For certain I can say that I’m not the person I dreamed of being when I graduated high school or college. I had so many dreams. I was going to be somebody….

Here I am, 43 years old and have done next to nothing with my life…haven’t taken the best care of my body…have let my husband and children dictate my life and now I don’t have a freakin’ clue as to how to get control…I did start walking a few weeks ago, working on getting control taking better care of body, step one, yes?

Looking back, I’ve always been known as someone other ME….I’ll explain. Since being old enough to be introduced in the following ways….

This is Raymond’s granddaughter….you remember Pete? This is one of his grandchildren…This is Terry Pete’s youngest….You know Bart, this is his little sister…so you’re married to Kirk….hey Kaet’s mom….Hi Leo’s mom! You get what I mean now?

Guess I should consider myself more fortunate than my sister…she’s a year and a week younger than my brother and being born a town girl, she moved away from the farm as soon as she could. She just hit the 30th year since graduating from high school mark, so she’s been away for almost 30 years. Don’t know how many times in the past 10 years I’ve heard, hell, thought it was just you and Bart, didn’t know you guys had a sister…..You have a sister? Didn’t know that…. That’s something I don’t mention being that she is the middle child and already tends to have that middle child mindset going on.

I realize now that I have a lot to think about…there’s more to life than being a stay at home mom whose name always has to be linked to a family member when being introduced OR when seeing someone after 20 years hearing, oh yeah, I remember you, Terry Pete’s baby, haven’t seen you since you were in diapers…..