The narrative construct of this film involves me being completely honest & open about how I have thought about penises

Let’s have a sexual conversation

When I was growing up
I was taught that penises were bad
But I didn’t feel like that
I didn’t buy in

‘I’m so wrong’ was the only voice I heard
I jumped in the river of no return even though I hadn’t learnt to swim

I was fascinated with penises
I wanted to touch them
and I wanted to play with them
and I wanted to know them how to use them to create reward & punishment

My thoughts taunted my dark side
They were close to the surface

If I had the opportunity my curiosity demanded my answer was yes
But it had to be totally compartmentalized from the rest of my life

The first naked penis I ever saw was my father’s
I was six years old.
It’s been uphill, or downhill, depending on your psychological point of view
ever since
But everyone has seen their Dad’s penis right?
Yes, you have
Don’t lie

My earliest thought was what does a penis feel like?
How do I get to touch one?

At this point in my life I decided I needed to see more penises
A vague plan started to form in my mind
It would become a cavalcade
and I would constantly need to adjust my vagina’s expectations
Did I just say that?
Look
Over there
A remixx

I still think they’re kind of ugly
but a kind of cute-ugly like a young Mick Jagger
Life now is a school
where I learn to remember
what my soul told me to forget