Reflections from a new Secular Franciscan

“A Catholic Lover’s Triangle!” – Ecclesiastes 3:5

I’ve never had to scrape “fog” off my window before: thank God for the global warming. I am meeting with my friends in the parish this morning for Mass, the Divine Mercy Chaplet, and then fellowship at our favorite “restaurant.” It has been several weeks for me,, due to weather, so I am a little excited.

Wise Ol' Solomon

Quote or Joke of the Day:

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not. – Mark Twain

Today’s Meditation:

A time to scatter stones, and a time to gather them; a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embraces. (Ecclesiastes 3:5)

It took me a long time of meditation to embrace and internalize this verse. Then I realized that this verse is all about intercourse: verbal, physical, and sexual. Everyone thinks intercourse is just about sexual relations. So untrue. Intercourse is a noun meaning an exchange between people or groups, especially conversation or social activity.

Sex is only allowed between a husband and wife living in a valid marriage, with God. Sex is a special relationship and grace given to us, and we must be open to bringing into this special relationship, another gift from the Holy Spirit: a new life. The pity with sexual relations outside of marriage, is that it reduces the sanctity and value of these two wonderful graces bestowed to us from our Creator.

The verbal and physical interactions we show to others, hopefully shows our love for those people. Verbal and physical intercourse are for all people, and not just for our spouses. I am going to limit this reflection though, to marriage, and to the importance of verbal and physical interaction in marriage. Don’t tell my wife, but I believe these two forms of interaction are probably much more important than sexual interactions, in any true marriage.

When a man and woman get married, they are coming together to become one, in a special and unique covenant, with God as a partner in the marriage. Yes, when you marry, not only do you wed your spouse, but also God: the ultimate marriage triangle of husband, wife, and the Holy Trinity! The three become one, and can never be separated. Can you remove your heart, brain, or lungs, and still survive? The answer is NO: and neither can you separate man from woman once merged in a true marriage.

The problems that doomed marriages have, are difficulties in intercourse. Usually not sexual, but instead verbal and physical interactions with each other. Another way to say this, is that marriage problems are almost always the result of poor COMMUNICATIONS. I can personally tell you, that any difficulties in my marriage have almost always been associated with improper, or lack of, communicating with my wife.

Open and honest communication is an art form. It needs to be developed, and practiced continuously, in order for it to be successful. A happy marriage, I have found, is one where the two have developed their communication styles that works for them; and that they share a religious faith, and faith in each other, that also brings them closer.

“Lord, thank you for being present in my marriage. Thank you for being there in the good times, and especially in the bad times. Thank you for never abandoning me or my wife, and we promise to never abandon you. Please stay with us always. Amen.”

Pax et Bonum

Dan Halley, SFO

*****

Secular Franciscan Order (SFO) Rule #15:

Let them individually and collectively be in the forefront in promoting justice by the testimony of their human lives and their courageous initiatives. Especially in the field of public life, they should make definite choices in harmony with their faith.