it's all about the journey…not the destination!

Peace on Earth and in the Fridge

On the East Coast, the week after Thanksgiving signals that it’s time to put up the holiday decorations. As I drive home from work at night, I can’t help but notice that all my neighbors have taken advantage of the atypical warm weather the past weekend, and used it as incentive to get those Christmas lights on the houses, and the lighted reindeer, sleighs, and snowpeople out on the lawns. Driving home from work is not the easiest way to unwind from a stressful day. Traffic is not relaxation-inducing. However, all the twinkling lights of white, red, yellow and green do have a soothing effect on me, and makes a real difference in my nightly commute.

With thoughts of Peace On Earth sinking into my soul, I contemplate the task I am undertaking this year during “the Eating Season”. Remember “the Eating Season”? That unbearably tempting, gluttonous, food-packed period of time between Halloween candy in October and Pigs in a Blanket and Champagne on New Years Eve? I set out a course for myself to train for a Spring Half Marathon so I would have a running training regimen during The Eating Season — with hopes (great hopes) of losing weight this year. It’s a good plan, and I’m happy that I made the committment. I have lost some weight since starting out on the path — but more importantly I have been building some muscle and watching my body take on a slimmer/firmer shape. It’s all good. It’s all part of the process.

But with two holidays behind me, both having created gains of 1.6 pounds that I had to lose a second time!! , I figure it’s time to tweak the plan. I think I’m on the right path with a committed exercise regime, but I think I have to start figuring out how to Make Peace with Food. Yea, Peace. What is my definition of Peace with Food? Well. Up until now, I have been dealing with my anxiety about overeating by ridding my fridge, my pantries, my home of anything tempting. Yea, my kids have been LUVIN’ IT! 🙂 My husband has been sneaking in an occasional donut or mini pie for them while I am at work. Yea, apparently I have created a condition where our home is under constant surveillance for anything resembling yummy or enjoyable, so that it may be banished to Siberia. Not good. I’m not looking to make my husband and kids closet eaters. I’m not looking to teach my daughters to eat in secret just like I dd all my life — I don’t want them to look upon food as a shameful thing they need to sneak. Yeah. I need to Make Peace with Food, so that my daughters and I can all Eat and not have to hide our feelings about doing it. Sounds simple enough. So, Making Peace with Food (for me) means I want to be able to have food and treats in the house, and be neutral about it. Have it be a non-issue. I suppose it’s like a recovering alcoholic getting to the point where they are able to be around alcohol and others drinking and being OK with not drinking.

I’m not exactly sure how I’m going to Make the Peace, but somehow I believe acknowledging that I need to do it s a big first step. Growing on this journey has led me to a place where I WANT to be more powerful than the Food. Oh yea coffee cakes….I know you are in the pantry! So What! I don’t care. I don’t want you right now. Yea, you too chocolate pretzels — big deal there are 4 more bags of you. I can have you anytime I want. I have waaayyyy more than 4 WPs or APs. So what Peter brought home donuts, I don’t even like how I feel when I have you for breakfast. You make me sleepy and leave a sugary aftertaste in my mouth. Ok, so maybe I’m going to be a Food Bully for a little while before I Make Peace….but I’ll eventually choose to Make it. On my terms!

I’ve started to create the new behaviors that accompany Making Peace with Food. This week, my “Experiment Treat Myself” went really well. I allowed myself to eat those chocolate covered pretzels, took my time to enjoy them, made them last — and the real surprise is…there are MORE in the pantry and they are NOT taunting me. Hmmm. That’s the real surprise. I think it’s because there IS a real sense of Peace and Control that comes with knowing you have enough points to buy that treat whenever you want. In fact, those points take on an even more powerful value when you ran your @ss up and down your neighborhood streets for 60 minutes to earn them. It’s kind of like when you were a kid and your parents gave you $20. You couldn’t spend that money fast enough. It was just burning a hole in your pocket. But then when you got a little older and you had to babysit those crazy kids up the street for hours and hours to earn your own $20. Well. That money was precious. I wasn’t going to spend THAT money on just anything. In fact, maybe I’ll save it, and wait for something REALLY good to buy with it. Something worth it. Well, that’s how those APs feel. I’m going to wait for something REALLY good to spend them on. And if I don’t desire anything REALLY good this week — well then I’ll just bank those points into my weight loss. Wow, now that’s some Math I could grow to Love.

So, my wish for myself “this Eating Season“, is that I stay on this path to Making Peace with Food. To be able to allow it in the house, without hearing it calling to me. To be able to earn those valuable, precious APs every week so I’m RICH enough to buy whatever my taste buds desire. And to be happy to take a pass on that Yummy treat in favor of a fun, flirty swim suit next summer…..

About Diane

Ciao! My name is Diane. I'm a wife, a mom, a working professional, and a Weight Watcher from New Jersey. I started blogging in 2011, at 45 years old, when I was training for my first Half Marathon at Rutgers on April 22, 2012. Since then, I've lost 80 pounds, completed my Half Marathon goal and gone on to train for and run my very first Full Marathon. On Jan 13, 2013, I ran the Disney Marathon in Orlando, Fl! What an incredible day. As the saying goes -- "The person who starts the race is not the same person who finishes the race." I am forever changed! So now we move on to the next phase of this journey! Come along. We're in this together!! Ciao for now!