September 19, 2009

RAGE

REMEMBER SARA? I DO. THIS VIDEO BASICALLY SUMS UP MY REACTION TODAY. I WON’T DENY IT- I WENT APESHIT.

Well, it all started off as a nice, relaxing day in APUSH. We were in groups, doing work nothing. In my group was me, Daisy, Victoria, Alejandro and Cesar. We hop from one topic to the next, laughing and stuff. Then, I mention that Alejandro and Cesar should dress up all nice like they do when they go and see orchestras and stuff, and then Daisy and I should dress lolita. Just as a joke, you know. Daisy jokes she’ll dress as a farmer and be a total bum, and then laugh laugh laugh oh ho ho ho…. and then Cesar has the nerve to say that Sara dressed up and had a little tea party that was like lolita. Oh no, you just didn’t.

In any other case I would have kept my cool and explained that not everything was lolita. But in this case I totally flipped.

Me: What did you say?

Cesar: Well, the pictures in your magazines and the tea party she had looked really similar. I mean, she’s really nice and funny and she did the little party thing.

Me: That’s not lolita.

Cesar: I didn’t say it was-

Me: No. Okay, no. What don’t you fucking understand? That bitch’s whorish, half-assed attempt is by no means lolita, kay?

Cesar: I just said that the two were similar-

Me: No, No, No. Her shitty Forever 21 dress and lolita have nothing in common, alright? I don’t want you to mention them in the same sentence, got it? It’s not lolita. She never will be. This conversation is over.

Cesar looked really taken aback by now, so I stopped. And then later, he said that a guy I know makes really stupid comments in his English class. Now, this guy is creepy, and I would have said so, but I was not in the mood. After I argue, I want to argue more. I can’t help it.

Me: Well, you were stupid enough to confuse Sara’s half-assed tea party with lolita, so I don’t think you can talk, eh?

Cesar: Look, I never said it was. I only said that they were similar.

Me: No. A shitty dress on a whore will never be lolita. Get it though your head. She’s not anything close to lolita. Fuck that stupid tea party. Don’t you dare speak about her.

Yeahhhh, I totally freaked out, flipped out, overeacted, etc etc. Over lolita clothes. OVER LOLITA CLOTHES. CLOTHES. But, no matter how sophisticated and mature I claim to be, I still retain some degree of shallow and narcissm. Lolita clothing, although it doesn’t really make or break anything, was always the one thing I had over her. Just something that I could hold onto. Silly, yes. Just the combined knowledge of Cesar being closer to Sara then I thought, and that he took something precious to me and compared it to her (I hope to God that he did not tell her about lolita) that just made me snap. I normally don’t get mad like this.

I will apologize, but say something along the lines of “I admit I overeacted, but my point remains valid.”