Oh that poor child. She may be acting out (although if the LW’s depictions are accurate she’s actually behaving quite reasonably and maturely given the circumstances), but sometimes kids do that. They can have a hard time with new step-parents, and they lack the emotional maturity to respond appropriately. But the LW has no excuse. She is an adult, she should know better.

I actually hope the daughter doesn’t come back to the fathers house, at least not while he’s married to this lady. It may hurt him, but it seems like a really toxic environment for the kid.

That’s a long ass letter. It’s an advice column which is why advice was given.

You’re so disrespectful to your stepdaughter it’s mind boggling. Have fun with that. It’s a good way to build family. You took her mom’s phone number off the board? How’s she supposed to feel free to contact her mom as needed? Your relationship sounds like a rollercoaster and there are major red flags.

Oh, and my dad literally cut my food when my fiance was present because that was our thing. Sometimes kids have little inside things with their parents where they do things that don’t need to be done just because it’s their kid.

Yeah, the ten year old is showing more maturity than either of the adults. I particularly couldn’t believe the paragraph about how ridiculous it is that a ten year old asks her dad to cut her food or for a glass of juice. And yes, if I was ten, I would be upset if someone erased my drawings from a whiteboard at my dads house.

This confirmed many of my suspicions after reading the initial letter. I worked on a divorce case for a man who’s now-ex-wife is eerily similar to this woman, actually. I have a feeling that no matter what she does, the daughter in this situation will never live up to her stepmom’s expectations.

I don’t think engaging in power struggles with a child indicates maturity. Besides, if the worst thing a 10 year old is doing is claiming a whiteboard and sending a Facebook message, that’s not too bad. I mean when I was 10 there were already kids in class that smoked, one who punched the principal in the stomach, kids that called their moms “bitches” to their face, etc.

I quit reading in detail at “microwave pancakes.” But if you have to write anything THAT long to defend your actions toward a 10-(now 11!) year old, you’ve already demonstrated that the advice that you’re a nutjob is correct.