Saturday, 22 June 2013

A break up is painful experience and
difficult to deal with on so many levels as I mentioned in a previous post. The
end of a close relationship, an intimate friendship, the dreams that were
shared with the significant other are just few things which are lost.

When are you really ready to move on to a
new relationship without the trauma of the past relation?

Below is a list of points to reflect on:

Your significant other from the past no longer occupies
your thoughts constantly. You cannot move
ahead with a new person if you are mentally focused on someone else.
During a break up your main thoughts are occupied by the ex – what could
have happened, what if things were somehow different, and what if you had
not made a mistake, what if there was something you should have said? Once
these thoughts of past relationship have slowly disappeared it will no
longer be the primary force in your life.

You no longer get all worked up and upset when
dealing with your ex. There will surely come a
time when dealing with your ex will become easier and much less emotional.
You will be dealing with just another annoying person.

You have stopped trying to please your ex. Once a break up has occurred all obligations to please are
over. You no longer do the special things you used to do for them. Favours
like washing the car or doing the laundry are no longer obligatory.

Your conversations with friends do not include
your ex anymore. We all tend to think and
speak about the most important things in our lives. If you are no longer
talking about your ex it means you can move on.

The romantic feelings are all gone. We all harbour feelings towards our ex just after a break up.
When they subside it means you have recovered considerably.

You can accept the fact that your ex may have a
new romantic partner. There is not a feeling
of jealousy because the emotional tie has worn off.

You no longer get angry at your ex. During a break up everyone feels intensely angry. When former
partners no longer evoke anger that means you have become detached
emotionally.

When you can delete you Ex from your phone, Facebook & Twitter and come to terms with
never seeing them again or talking to
them again then that usually means you are fully committed to moving forward with your life and
finding the partner of your dreams.

You must wait and reflect on your break-up until
you get over some of these feelings and attachments I have listed. Everyone
goes through them during a break up and it's only natural to feel a certain way.

You just have to be positive and believe
there is a new relationship on the horizon and one that is better than you have
previously experienced.