Speakofheart #3

Assalamualaikum.

I may not being able to be prefect for you. I do alot of mistake that I know you won't forgive me. Everything goes wrong and Im sure you would feel the same as I am.

In the first semester we went to the college it doesnt changed anything. Everythings went well. We do things together and we fought for each other bcoz we knew we love to be together. You've got many friends there and I never stopped you from being yourself. I know you just want to befriends with them but my heart doesnt see that. I love you so I just leave all the things that blew in my mind disappear just like that. I love you because who you are, not the one who being others just to get comfort with them. I love you because I know you were differ from others. You could make up your mind and you know your ability to get what you want. I love you because I feels that you are the one who could bring my soul into the places I'd never been, giving spirits and though me the meaning of life, stay besides me to get thru the life together. I miss the old you.

But..

Then you've changed. I like when you change to be someone different. You changed your appearance, the way you talk to me and the way how you treat me, the future that you want. Its about yourself. totally changed. I know you love the way they though you to be more exclusive and more popular person. I know you just want it happen bcoz you want to, not bcoz you need to. Day by days, you've changed to someone who I dont even know where you come from.

Ego, more excited to be with friends...

You are too busy with your friends and left me all alone. What do you expect me to do when you were busy with all your activities. I miss you but I know you wont feel that. When I started to keep distance with you, you just said that I doesnt like you anymore.

You wouldnt know till the day you sees me with other guy which it not true. You keep finding my mistakes bcoz of shitty things. You keep blaming on me bcoz of the things that I never do with that guy. You leave without any explanation :'/ I need you and I miss you. So much. But because of your ego you keep silent and blocking all the things that connected with me, you deleting my pictures and...... everything seems so fast.

After a week you find me only wanna talk about that guy. And you asked me to be friend with you. Did you feel when I asked you to be friend with me while I keep likes and comments all the guys photos? Are you didnt get jealous when I do the shitty things? :'/ Did you doesnt have any feeling tho? :'/ You asked me to be friend with you but I rejected it because I couldnt watch you do that all things infront of me. I just can't :'/ But you dont understand what I'm trying to tell you. Last word that I remembered till now, "saya nak berkawan tapi awak taknak, jangan salahkan sy plak lepasni." :'/

In a day, you let your ego ripped all your heart. In a week, you let me being alone without any mercy. In less than a month, you could move on your life.