THE NEW YORKER RICKARD (Absently): Sure. P. F. M. (Rising): "fhat's settled You ought to make a couple of billion out of this, Tex. RICKARD (Casually): About that. (T he P. F. M. starts out. As he reaches the door Rickard speaks. Evidently an afterthought.) RI CKARD : By the way, can this thing of yours sock? P. F. M. (Puzzled): Sock? RICKARD (Pantomime with his fists): You know, fight, box, hit. Stuff like that. P. F. M. (Co1Jtprehending): Oh. (A pause) I dunno. I didn't ask him. Why? RICKARD (A shrug): No matter. I just wondered. (P. F. M. exits. Rickard writes Demp- sey a telegram offering him his choice of the Bank of England or Andrew Mellon's job for a week for his end. He exits. The statuette of Jesse James jumps off its horse and beats its brains out on the edge of the ink bottle.) CURTAIN. P. S.- They're tearing down the dear old Garden. Ain't it a shame. -William Slavens McNutt .+ g..... Notes of a Traveling Man Pittsburgh, Pa. Choked on a chicken bone while eating a sweetbread cro- quette. Kansas City, Mo. Found a mush- room in a combination dish marked "wi th mushrooms". St. Louis, Mo. Ate a baked apple with only half the core distributed through it. Chicago, 111. Misdirected by a man who was probably a stranger himself, but didn't like to admit it. Buffalo, N. Y. Talked to a man for half an hour without being asked "What's your line?" N. Y. Central R. R. Heard a new story in the Pullman smoking room. -So S. Chastity Begins at Home I have had considerable experience living out and know what it means to go fifty-fifty. I am somewhat religious and would not tol- erate an immoral atmosphere, but at the same time have no obj ection to wild parties, in- cluding a couple of drinks) but know how far to go. I like a good time and am al.. w,ays ready to do my bit where friendly rela- tions are concerned. -Excerpt from a reply to an adver- tisement for a roommate. We did our best and if we could have had a better team we would have won) but we hadn't. -Statement by college relay team 21 EARN $50,000 THE FIRST DAY I ' " . - 1 ':' !.: ( . ' " i' i,J:..:;:íi:: <':",':' ,!r , ' ' (., '!/ I \ " " \ I ; 1 . J;:, ,{ ),1 1 1 ,t,- I ., . qj . ?t; '<' ':' dV -, \\\. ! ' " ' ... -' ..r ";.-: ,:.:,',\ , 'Vil' w^ L",",,: \ it { ,#," ':" <.- ' ,:' ,', , 4 ;.,.... I. II, '>," '.', i: .f , fi:i6, i 1 ':'" \ \ . l I. '. '" "' ' . "4 b Â / I " r" I' ;í: ":"",4'," 'I :\'.0' ,,,: . , 'I {ti ÏIIi: 1" ;Î e:'", \,: , ' i'i'i!I: l l i;: ", (- _ :1,\,\\t' :Y' _' '-? ," ">b j. I, . I:I '. :: I j · " ' \' \r. ' ;ø;z / "I:-" J.1i ; I' '><' :: ":;11/ 'if" '.!,i ,\\f '. W , . llf ?p 11 - , ;;<':,,: ' ,, . \ I i . , ." . i . '/ '... . '!lff1/ (j...7 " & "' f} .7:6/ ! ":/ ;;iV" ; i ,). 1(;. /' ! .\ ;: /;; { :: ÇÞ '{? .a ' ' I /1 /I . ': tt i : ;$f .- " - , "tj I;", :! // \ <s ' ::ø-z =- - I,J'II/! ' l'1!!!f;' '& b. /// &j. J& " ./ ø' / / /: 1//; / ','J ,ff( :'If/i l íl,',1 f ,! j \ I 1 · If! I y f /1 1'14'. d " , \ "." , ..Þ I ' " 'fir . Ir "ia .... . . Read what J. H. K. t now of Montreal, has to say: U Before I took up bank mes- sengering I was struggling along on my salary of $20 t OOO a year as a credit manager, trying to make both ends meet. Then I read one of your ads and started to think. I took the course. My first day I earned $67,000, my second day I earned $58,650 in United States Stèel Preferred (which I was canny enough to hold for its recent rise), and the third day a friend let me in on the Eighth National Bank ser- vice and I made a cool hundred thousand. Since my fourth day I have been travelling and have gotten to see many interesting and out-of-the-way places that 1 would otherwise never have seen." BE A BANK MESSENGER Our graduates have se- cured positions with some of the leading houses in the country. Our courses in the forging of recommenda- tions practically assures a position any w her e you want. Learn while you earn! The course teaches you not only how to get a job but how to act on the job. Our files are full of testi- monials from bank messengers who really never knew their work until they took one of our courses. Read what Baden B. Baden, of Tahiti, South Sea Islands, has to say: "Before I took your course I was like a child in arms. I was always going to Canada with non-negotiable securities. After taking your course, I was able to distinguish between cash and notes and between gilt-edged bonds and non- negotiable paper at a distance of sixty feet." You read about our graduates every day. Why not sub- scribe to a course now? It is only a question of time before bank messengers will be eliminated and the advancing tide of business efficiency will sweep a system of sending securi- ties by open letter or carrier pigeon into its place. Get in the swim. Sign the coupon. --- ----- .-.-----.. ----- ........---- ...-.-... ---- --.. - ---"" ......- ,.,.,.----- COUPON THE LEAGUE FOR A FULL LIFE NEW YORK CITY. Kindly send me a sample copy of the course indicated below. If I take the course) I promise to send the first $ I )000 Liberty Bond I pick up in my business. Wall Street I\lessengering (Plain) .............. Wall Street Messengering (Fancy, with Nan1e ..... revol ver instruction and knock-out drops)..... ........... ....... ...... ,..... ..... --,.... .....,.. .., Address..... Constructing an Alibi.,., ....... '" ........ ........ ...... How to Read Foreign Time Tables............ City,....... What Countries Have Extradition Treat- ies? ..............,. ,....,............,.........,..".....,...., State..... .., Life of Nicky Arnstein...,............................ Or send the above coupon and five dollars to 25 West Forty-fifth Street and receive THE NEW YORKER for one year.