Even before what is laughingly termed the election "result" was known, the language of politicians and the commentariat was tending towards a certain sexual hue when it came to that tease of a third party, with Peter Mandelson memorably warning progressive voters: "If you flirt with Nick Clegg … you'll wake up with David Cameron."

As coalition talks have progressed, the romantic allusions have increased, with the maidenly Lib Dems wooed by competing beaus who may or may not end up resorting to a pistol duel to conclude their suit.

But the Mills and Boon argot took on a decidedly less courtly colour overnight, as speculation mounted about the possibility that Clegg might spurn the Tories after all (see – it's hard not to) and return to Labour's close embrace (sorry). On this morning's Today programme, David Blunkett appeared to be invoking the threat not of public service cuts but of Moll Flanders when he asked testily: "Can we trust the Liberal Democrats? They're behaving like every harlot in history." Meanwhile, senior Tories described the behaviour of the Liberal Democrats as "sordid", while the blogosphere lost no time in calling them whores.

Prostitutes are, of course, notoriously volatile politically, so why bother taking offence? Flirting, wooing, getting into bed – the basic vocab of romance is strangely suited to political drama in which passions run high and the stakes are even higher. But just as metaphor has given way to cliche, so the undercurrent of tedious linguistic sexism has been made explicit. It didn't take long for Clegg's "flirtation" with Labour to be unambiguously gendered as capricious female sexuality. It is mightily irritating to find it still the case that, whenever a person or party is to be portrayed as feckless, fickle or flighty, we head straight for the big box of gender generalisations.

In the end, the consensus would seem to be that the Lib Dems are acting collectively just like a woman – a particularly slutty one, whose favours can be cheaply bought. No wonder Harriet Harman is the only actual female on the negotiating teams.