Thursday, November 17, 2005

Meanwhile, in the Land of Fromage…

the riots by unidentified “youths” of unknown ethnic background reachthe 7th consecutive day of being all over, following hard upon 14consecutive days of not ending at all or not happening at all, if you ask thevictims of fwench “news”, also referred to as “viewers”.It may finally beall over, however. One hopeful sign was that Jacques ChIRAQ finally venturedoutside his spiderhole where he’d been hiding up until now, crying like a littlegirl and holding on to his stuffed sheep “Dominique” for dear life. It is saidthat if the fwench pwesident comes out and sees his own shadow, it means fourmore weeks of hotly denied riots. Or maybe he surrenders to it immediately inbroken German. We’re not quite sure which one it is.

PARIS - France’s worst rioting since the 1960s seems to be nearingan end, the national police chief said Sunday as fewer cars were torchednationwide and Paris remained calm despite Internet and cell phone messagesurging violence in the streets of the capital.[…]Youths set fire to 374parked vehicles before dawn Sunday, compared to 502 the previous night, policesaid. A week ago, 1,400 cars were incinerated in a singlenight.

374 counts of vehicular arson by “youths” of indeterminate ethnic heritagein a single night is apparently considered “calm” in the land of the GallicGimps and their Garlic-Buttered Garden Pest “delicacies”. Remind us to stay awayfrom there if things heat up. Nah, no need. We wouldn’t want to set foot in thatdump if we were paid to do so, which may well be the next trick up the fwenchtourist industry’s sleeve if things continue like they have.

European Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso proposed that theEuropean Union give $58 million to France for helping riot-hit towns recover. Hesaid the EU could make up to $1.2 billion available in longer-termsupport.

What riots? We thought they were no more than figments of an irresponsibleforeign press’ collective imaginations?

In scattered attacks, youths [of mysterious and undeterminedcultural origin - M.] rammed a burning car into a center for retirees inProvence and pelted police with stones in the heart of Lyon, the country’s thirdbiggest city. A firebomb was tossed at a Lyon mosque but did not explode.Thenationwide storm of arson attacks, rioting and other violence, often by youngpeople from impoverished minority communities, has lost steam since thegovernment declared a state of emergency Wednesday.

We see that they haven’t given up their predilection for torching oldgeezers, the darling little “youths”. Still, we feel that we have to remind youthat, hundreds of torched cars, a burning nursing home, stoned police and afailed firebombing of a mosque (they must have mistaken it for a synagogue, ormaybe they’d run out of places to torch) aside, nothing is happening. It’s allgood. Calm, actually. So quit that irresponsible nonsense about riots, willyou?

If the downward trend continues, “things could return to normalvery quickly,” National Police Chief Michel Gaudin said, noting that Frenchyouths burn about 100 cars on an average Saturday night.The unrest continuedfor an 18th night Sunday. In Toulouse, rioters rammed a car into a primaryschool before setting the building ablaze, the regional governmentsaid.

OK, we’re getting a headache here. First they’re winding down, then they’reall but over, then things could “return to normal pretty quickly” (nothingabnormal about a hundred torched cars in fwance, obviously, which is nosurprise. We’d burn the sorry excuses for vehicles ourself if we found anyoutside the palace) and now they’re continuing for an 18th night?How manyprimary schools are burned down by “youths” on an average Sunday night infwance?Don’t tell us, we’re not sure that we want to know.So, it maywell be that the media have decided that it’s all over, but it’s still the bestreality show out there. Besides, we’re not about to let ourself be stuck withall of these snacks and beers and nothing to laugh at on the tube.

Social issues, not religion, are behind Paris riotsIn addition, as shocking as the riots were, it is important to keep them inperspective: This is no intifada, no civil war. It was a riot by underprivilegedcitizens, similar to other events that have rocked Western countries in recentyears.In light of the current situation, the government of France hasset the following two goals:

A show of force; to reestablishpublic order and protect citizens and property; to prosecute those suspected ofviolence to the full extent of the law; and to use the necessary legal tools toenable police to do their job

A show of justice: Frenchauthorities know full well that suppressing the riots may be necessary, but willnot solve everything. Therefore, Prime Minister Dominique de Villepin hasannounced a series of concrete steps (such as job creation and fightingdiscrimination), to aid those wanting to meld into our society.