“How’s your day?” he asks.
“Good! How’s yours?”
“Good!”
“Happy New Year!”
“Happy New Year! How was your last night?”
“Good. But I’m really looking forward to this year. A fresh start, you know?”
“Yeah. Me, too.” He rings up an item, “Protein bars? What, are you trying to get buff or something?”

I laugh, because I’ve just worked out and I’m standing their in an athletic cut t-shirt.

*To the best of my knowledge, there is no way to fit 13 eggs in a standard egg carton (no, double egg yolks don’t count, genius!).

And this is why I think it would require much more powerful magic than simply crossing out 12 and writing 13 next to it.

Besides, hens have been laying 12 eggs at a time for like forever. And it is pretty much common knowledge that this is why eggs come in packs of a dozen (*which is also the inspiration for bagels and donuts).

If we start asking hens to lay 13 eggs at a time, instead of 12, I’m sure some simply won’t be able to do it.

If everyone took everything I take seriously as seriously as I take it, everyone and everything I take seriously would be different. And if everyone and everything I take seriously was different, would I still take everything as seriously as I take it? Would everyone?

Considering the often embarrassing (but sometimes funny) consequences of poor sink design, I think some manufacturers actually take pleasure in designing sinks that forcibly splash water onto the groin area of anyone foolish enough to turn on the water faucet.

I don’t really have bladder issues. But someone clearly thinks it’s funny making people think that I do.