Life will make you conservative

Back in college I worked at the Borders in Thousand Oaks. I shelved books at 4 a.m. While working there, politics and religion came up a lot, and I was the sole defender of two ideologies: Christianity and conservatism. One of the most interesting conversations I ever had was with a fellow college student named Bob. Bob and I enjoyed talking about all the great issues of life. One day he looked at me and said something I’ll never forget. “Paul,” he said, “you wanna know the difference between Republicans and Democrats? I’ll tell ya. Everyone’s a Democrat until some jerk with a gun comes and robs them. Then they realize what the world is really like.” He paused and said, “I hope no one ever does that to me.”

Of course Bob never wanted to be robbed, nor did I want Bob to be robbed, but Bob was more afraid that a hard jolt of reality would steal much more than his wallet; Bob was afraid it would steal his liberal mindset.

Recently, one of America’s biggest liberals, Bill Maher, has become a defender of the two faiths. This, of course, is extremely ironic when one looks back on Maher’s recent career. He gave $1 million to the Obama campaign; his 2008 anti-religion film, Religulous, mocked all types of faith; he’s spoken out cruelly against Sarah Palin (beyond most); and his HBO roundtable show, “Real Time with Bill Maher,” is a bully pulpit that usually pits three liberals (Maher and two guests) against a moderate Republican.

On April 19, Maher’s one-on-one interview was with CSU, San Bernardino, professor Brian Levin, director of the Center for the Study of Hate and Extremism. After more information came out linking the Boston bombers with Islam, Maher brought Levin on to help explain why Islam is more violent than Christianity or Judaism. Levin instead decided to say how all groups have extremists. Then Bill got mad.

“You know what, yeah, yeah,” Maher said. “You know what — that’s liberal bullshit right there … they’re not as dangerous. I mean, there’s only one faith, for example, that kills you or wants to kill you if you draw a bad cartoon of the prophet. There’s only one faith that kills you or wants to kill you if you renounce the faith. An ex-Muslim is a very dangerous thing. Talk to Salman Rushdie after the show about Christian versus Islam. So you know, I’m just saying let’s keep it real.”

Maher went on to explain that there is only one religion that acts out violently against its oppressors, citing how Mormons have responded extremely well over The Book of Mormon musical that mocks their faith. Maher even went on to add that most Muslims believe that if you insult Muhammad, “You have what’s coming to you.”

Not only has Maher been battling liberal concepts, but policies as well.

A few weeks earlier, Maher was complaining about his tax rate. While talking with MSNBC host Rachel Maddow, who was bashing the rich for wanting to keep their money, Maher came out against her.

“You know what? Rich people … actually do pay the freight in this country. I just saw these statistics,” Maher explained. “I mean, something like 70 percent. And here in California, I just want to say, liberals — you could actually lose me. It’s outrageous what we’re paying — over 50 percent. I’m willing to pay my share, but yeah, it’s ridiculous.”

Twice now, Maher has dumped on “liberal” ideas and policies. This is not to say Maher has switched sides, but it looks as if Bill has finally had that “robbery” experience my friend Bob was so terrified of being victim to one day.

Life will make you conservative, folks. Just wait.

Maybe the best way to sum up this article is by paraphrasing the famous adage attributed to Winston Churchill: If you are young and not liberal, you have no heart. If you are old and not conservative, you have no brain.

Much of liberalism stems not from “what is” but from “what it should be.” That’s a naive way of life, and for many, it’s time they stopped confusing their hearts with their brains.

Related Articles

Comments

I realize that conservatives will go to extreme lengths to make the facts fit their worldview, but Paul Moomjeam's column about Bill Maher takes the cake. You really think that Maher's becoming a conservative based on two statments this season, as opposed to the hundreds of others he's made that back up that he still strongly holds to his libertarian (not liberal, Mr. Moomjean, sorry to disappoint you) beliefs? Based on the twists of logic he had in this column, if Mr. Moomjean ever decides to give up writing, he could have a bright future ahead of him in the next Republican White House, or as a baker at Auntie Anne's.

posted by pschnebs on 5/03/13 @ 03:54 p.m.

One of the typical conservative fallacies is to label others as right or left. They often fail to comprehend the nuance of real political/social ideologies. Some of us "liberals" also a bit "libertarian". Our common ground is an earnest desire to dismantle the Empire. I know that I am one day late (and new to this forum), but May the Fourth be with you Mr. Mahr.

posted by ENVIROSCIGUY on 5/05/13 @ 11:08 a.m.

If Maher actually is Islamophobic, Moomjean would be willing to accept him into the cult of neocon hate-mongers? That's mighty "Christian" of him, right?