Robert Mann: The persistence of suffering

Thursday

May 31, 2012 at 12:01 AMMay 31, 2012 at 11:52 AM

During a period of my life marked by acute emotional pain and anxiety, I decided to redouble my efforts to draw closer to Christ. I devoured Christian books, watched movies on the faith, and read scripture on a regular basis. On an intellectual level, I was putting effort into fulfilling the most important relationship in my life. On a day-to-day, brush-your-teeth, throw-out-the-old-socks level, I was looking for a quick and effective cure for my suffering.

Robert Mann

During a period of my life marked by acute emotional pain and anxiety, I decided to redouble my efforts to draw closer to Christ. I devoured Christian books, watched movies on the faith, and read scripture on a regular basis. On an intellectual level, I was putting effort into fulfilling the most important relationship in my life. On a day-to-day, brush-your-teeth, throw-out-the-old-socks level, I was looking for a quick and effective cure for my suffering.

After a few weeks of these new habits, I had to admit the cure was not working. The suffering remained, insomnia continued to ruin my nights and days, and anxiety was manifesting itself in physical symptoms. One particular night I was watching a movie on the life of Jesus, and I found myself too depressed and anxious to even focus.

In the midst of these miserable days, I had a vision that was striking both in its clarity and its meaning. I was in a place of absolute darkness and stillness, where no element of walls, furniture or geography could be seen. From above, a hand and arm reached down to me. The hand must have been generating its own light because I could see its glow against the blackness.

At the same time, Christ instructed me to take hold of his hand and promised he would not let go. The broader message was that I must go through this pain, but Jesus would walk with me, and carry me, through each step. The particular season of suffering would one day end, but there was no way to avoid or escape the journey.

Reflecting back on this experience, I realize there are seasons of suffering that never end. In 1st Corinthians, the apostle Paul appeals to the Lord three times for deliverance from an ongoing affliction that kept him from being “too elated.” Though Paul had witnessed and performed countless miracles, this particular suffering was to remain with him through his ministry and life.

Pioneering psychologist Carl Jung once stated, "Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering." While we count the cost of life’s painful experiences, there also seems to be a cost for trying to deny that the hurt exists. The end result is akin to madness or a separation from reality.

Throughout the history of the church, some ministers and charlatans have promoted a “health and wealth” interpretation of the Bible. Try selling that to someone who has just lost their home or endured a lifetime of mental illness. Such false gospels inevitably end in disappointment. Following Christ does not bring an escape from pain, but we do know for certain that we will never be alone or unloved. And there is a hand that will never let go of our own.

Robert Mann is managing editor of eChristianNews.com and can be contacted at rmann@echristiannews.com.

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