Just came back from the 4 day road trip that lasted a night.... The tree top climbing was an..EXPERIENCE... At one point, one by one we had to FREE FALL out of an 80ft oak tree...We then swang up into a vertical crash net which we had to climb back onto the platform to carry on tree-trecking... Felt like an orangutan...With a harness.

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

Was at work the other day, It had been an incredible long day...So I went to clean out the bins (Such a lovely, humble job) and i started talking to the bin aimlessly, sharing my thoughts. Turned round to find another member of staff staring and laughing at me..

"C'mon bin, I wanna see 100% shine or else ill douse you in domestos...How would you like that?"

When your walking through the street of your hometown with your younger sister and a woman on a hollistic therpay stall beckons you to have an audio massage infront of a crowd.. So thats what happened yesterday, she made train whistle nosies into my ear and jabbed at my back for a good 7-8 minutes whilst claiming that i was gaining energy in my 'eternal self' infront of a crowd armed with phones and video recorders.. Tried to contain my laughter as it was a rather bizzare expieriece..

Thursday, 23 May 2013

....When your watching a movie in the pictures and someones lover has just died, everyones like depressed and your best mates tummy lets of a dying whale sound that violently echoes through the still, mute cinema..

So today I tried a falafal... CHICKPEAS, MINTY STUFF and all the vegetables that I'd normally loook at in the supermarket before retreating out the aisle and heading towards the confectionary.

Most yummiest, NOMMIEST shit I've eaten in a while and guess what - ITS GOOD FOR YOU. Its full of the good stuff that does good shizzle to your gutssss ladies and gents ANDDD it includes all the nommy - licious stuff that we all want gorge on.

Boys...
Whats with the whole "SUP"... *Half nod* - Blank face like greeting... When we were alien like feoutus's I swear down that a vocabulary including the words HELLO were created.. And what the hell is up with the teenage grunt that is slowly taking over the boy-kind?

Have you ever wanted to walk into the middle of the street and just yell NINJA TURTLE? Well... I ask you too... I ask you to go out and shout it out.. Just for the pure sake of it.. You know you want to. There is no point in this post... I applaude you if your reading this. I TAKE MY FUCKING HAT OF TO YOU. Anon.

DEAR my fellow internet friends,
Its nearly been a year since I last wrote - Crazy stuff! SO over the last year I've flown to Antartica to hang out with the polar bears..Met a really nice one called Dave, hung out in the igloo a few times. I've been to the deep south of America to stuff my face with all American burgers - Kidding, I turned vegiterean.....I've also went down the Venician river on a Gondola and rescued a donkey flying out of the mid-air in southern Portugal.

I BULLSHIT

....I've actually worked..and worked..and GUESS what... worked.. Took the garbage out a few times a week..Worked.. BLAH BLAH BLAH.. I rescued a toad in the drains at work... WORKWORKWORK... Sucks being an adult *face of dis-content*