There are some people who say Big Cup has ruined football, stripping the sport of its soul and turning it into an uncompetitive chore in which only the richest clubs can dream of glory. Well just you try telling that to Leonardo, sporting director of Beckham Saint-Germain, who was so swept up by the emotion of spending a morning in Nyon that he proposed live on air to his girlfriend, Anna Billò, straight after the draw for the last eight. "Do you want to marry me?" he asked the bewildered Sky Italia presenter. "You have to answer me now. I'm waiting for your answer. It's not that difficult." At first Billò was flustered, telling the Brazilian smoothball that they'd talk about it at home but after much persistence, eventually she seemed to relent. "OK," she said. Ah, the romance of Big Cup is alive and well!

It was just a shame that Leonardo didn't conduct every interview in this manner, because next up was a cosy chat with Sky Sports News's Bryan Swanson about the draw, which pitched BSG into a daunting tie with Barcelona in a repeat of the 1997 Tin Pot Winners' Pot final. Remember that one, Uefa? Unfortunately Zlatan Ibrahimovic is suspended for the first leg and won't be around for another reunion with his former club, although that's not the main news. The main news is that David Beckham is in the quarter-finals of Big Cup. Have that, Europe, with your pitying glances and attempts to make us feel included by letting Steve McManaman do the draw and England's Brave Wembley Stadium host the final. Elsewhere Borussia Dortmund and Real Madrid were given favourable draws with Málaga and Galatasaray, respectively, while the tie of the round sees Bayern Munich and Juventus lock horns.

Unlike in previous years, Uefa deigned not to get the draw for the semi-finals out of the way too, presumably because the traditional seven-course banquet was about to start. Anyway they had to get the real quiz, the draw for Big Vase quarter-finals, out of the way and here was where the Premier League really came into its own. Sure, the day started badly but it ended on a high, with Chelsea off to Russia to play Rubin Kazan, Gareth Bale and The Hot Spurs up against FC Basel/Basle/Barrrrrl in the Christian Gross derby and Newcastle handed a tricky tie against Benfica.

After a week in which the Premier League was apparently plunged into crisis, it was perplexing to see three English sides going great guns in Big Vase, a tournament many have declared provides real proof about a league's strength. As ever, the Fiver doesn't know what to think.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"It used to be you could get your coaching licence in England from the supermarket with your beans and bacon. Now you have to get your licence and do your courses, so I don't see that happening" – Fulham boss Martin Jol, who clearly shopped in places different to the Fiver, says Danny Murphy isn't about to take a coaching job at the club.

FIVER LETTERS

"Following Michael Thomas's letter describing all of the names of lamps used to grow weed (yesterday's Fiver letters), I have but one question. Could you please forward me Michael's email address? Asking for a friend" – Todd Van Allen (and others).

"If Michael would be so kind as to provide us with an address to which we can send him a prize, we'd be much obliged" – P Lod.

"Does Michael's letter indicate that the seizure of grow lights meant Notts County were able to say they were 'up for grabs now'?" – Sean Joyce.

"Alan Pardew's quote saying Spurs are 'in it to win it' (yesterday's Fiver), conjured up a fitting metaphor for English clubs in European competitions. The competitions being the National Lottery's 'In It To Win It'. Both have tanned hosts (Dale Winton and Michel Platini) in a game of pre-selected contestants. You can put a lot of money into it but can be sent to the red area and walk away with nothing – à la Man City this year. You get a chance of a reprieve in the red area – à la Chelsea and Big Vase this year. You also get someone appearing in the final who had no right to be there, did not contribute for the majority of the show, got lucky and scooped the lot – à la Chelsea last year. Arsenal got a fiendishly tough question like the age of a celebrity where all three answers are expressed in minutes with one minute separating them, while Manchester United's question had the right answer removed from the options halfway through" – Dan Hand.

JOIN GUARDIAN SOULMATES

We keep trying to point out the utter futility of advertising an online dating service "for interesting people" in the Fiver to the naive folk who run Guardian Soulmates, but they still aren't having any of it. So here you go – sign up here to view profiles of the kind of erudite, sociable and friendly romantics who would never dream of going out with you.

BITS AND BOBS

Lord Ferg says former former England defender Rio Ferdinand may remain former England defender Rio Ferdinand for a while yet. "I was as surprised as anyone when I heard [Ferdinand had been called up to the England squad]," puced Ferg. "I need to speak to the [United] doctor because we prepare Rio Ferdinand in a certain way and there are certain treatments he has to go through."

Newcastle's Hatem Ben Arfa could miss the rest of the season if he has surgery on hamstring twang. "[Preparing for next season] is the priority for him now because he's been a huge miss for us," sobbed Alan Pardew. "He gives us that X-factor," added Pardew as Ben Arfa belted out a so-so version of I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That).

Arsène Wenger says Thomas Vermaelen and Wojciech Szczesny are not guaranteed starting places after missing the Big Cup tie against Bayern Munich. "You have to face it like that, the last game decides the next one," he said. "All the players are in the same position." That position usually being 25 yards away from the man they're supposed to be marking.

And Bayern Munich president Uli Hoeness has taken a pop at the club's former coach Louis van Gaal. "His problem is that Louis is not God, but the father of God," theologised Hoeness. "Before the world existed, Louis was already there."