It’s pretty unlikely that I’ll ever claim that I can do brain surgery, build a nuclear reactor or fix the economy in three days.

You’d need to be a specialist, and a very experienced one to do that.

You use a specialist to consult with you when you want to create the best possible outcome, the best possible future.

And if they can’t do what is says on the tin, those Probable, Possible and Preferable futures turn into Improbable, Impossible, and frickin’ Disastrous outcomes.

As ever, fertilizer is a great bed for humour. I introduce to you an old friend (a character from the brilliant comic Catherine Tate) as a new concept (a chameleon to watch out for):

Helen Marsh

A woman who claims “I can do that!” when her friends and colleagues are in search of people with specific skills. For instance, in one episode, her colleague needs someone to practise tennis with, and Helen happily accepts to assist her, implying that she can play tennis brilliantly. However, she is abysmal at tennis and hits the balls way out of the court into a group of trees. In another sketch, she claims she can speak seven languages for a conference, and proceeds to “translate” into nonsensical sounds that were based on linguistic stereotypes.

Beware. Be warned. And when you spot a Helen Marsh remember to say:

No you can’t.

You sold me a ticket to cirque de soleil. What’s with the sock puppet?

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This raises a point close to my heart, which is trying to find expertise, but getting rubbish. Half the time you do a google search and ring up companies, you spend half an hour hearing their sales pitch before you work out they don’t have the expertise you need.

It’s for this reason that I recently helped launch expertmagnet.com
This site turns the marketplace on its head by allowing the buyer of expertise to post their requirements once, and have companies that wan’t to do the work come to them.
Check it out when you get a chance and let me know what you think.
Cheers,
Mark