This game, for me, is the James Blunt of football Sundays. It's the last Sunday that will be occupied by something that makes me miserably.

"You're Beautiful" by James Blunt is one of the worst most annoying songs ever written. It is a steaming pile of donkey shit the like of which we don't normally hear in a piece of "music" not involving Fred Durst or Scott Stapp. And it puts a smile on my face every time I hear it. I love to hear it because every time I do it allows me to think "maybe this is the very last time I will ever hear this in my life." And that is an absolutely wonderful thought. I can't help but smile thinking something like that. Sure, I've been wrong every time but the last one (fingers crossed) but the thought in the moment is still blissful.

So, this is the last Browns game that is going to fuck up my weekend for a good long while. Just the thought of months of Sundays unbefouled with 3 hours of miserable Dogshit that I'm somehow compelled to partake in makes me absolutely giddy with excitement. And who knows, maybe I'll be dead by next September. That would be sublime.

As much as many of us laughed at the idea of this FO tanking, you can make the argument that is exactly what they had in mind all season with the TRich trade, the lack of interest in finding a QB to save the season and the lack of urgency to do anything with the RB spot (outside of a old man like McGahee). A very subtle tanking?

Not that we were possibly good enough it needed to be scripted mind you.

Criminals in this town used to believe in things...honor, respect."I heard your dog is sick, so bought you this shovel"

If we get just an average QB we will win. Campbell is better than Weeds, but he's still far below average. Hoyer would've won us 6 more games...QB of the future (Manzel?) would have us as serious contenders.

When you play poker and have a shit hand, do you keep betting? No. You don't even stick around for the flop. You get out as fast as possible. Once they saw Weeden was a craptastic shitfest they folded on the season ASAP by trading TRich (which we all now know was brilliant) and handing Hoyer the keys. Only they didn't see Hoyer being as capable and he almost ruined it. That was the moment they realized they are much closer than they thought. But he got hurt so...

Shit, playing Cousins at Guard is all the evidence you need. I bet they were hoping somebody would blow up Weeded and they'd have an excuse to tank.

More evidence: look at those games we lost in the last minute. All because of key mistakes; drops, penalties, special teams fails, and blown coverages. The art of the tank.

They want a championship caliber QB on this team. He's not here right now. So secure highest draft pick possible to get the guy you want. QED.

When you play poker and have a shit hand, do you keep betting? No. You don't even stick around for the flop. You get out as fast as possible. Once they saw Weeden was a craptastic shitfest they folded on the season ASAP by trading TRich (which we all now know was brilliant) and handing Hoyer the keys. Only they didn't see Hoyer being as capable and he almost ruined it. That was the moment they realized they are much closer than they thought. But he got hurt so...

Shit, playing Cousins at Guard is all the evidence you need. I bet they were hoping somebody would blow up Weeded and they'd have an excuse to tank.

More evidence: look at those games we lost in the last minute. All because of key mistakes; drops, penalties, special teams fails, and blown coverages. The art of the tank.

They want a championship caliber QB on this team. He's not here right now. So secure highest draft pick possible to get the guy you want. QED.

I understand all that, my point is that there isn't one out there right now.

motherscratcher wrote:Rumors all over twitter that Chudziznski is a very possible one and done.

What a clown show.

Chud is not what is wrong with this team. How do win in the NFL with ZERO running game and a 3rd string QB? The FO set up this tank, and tank is what we got.

Damn cold, setting the team up to fail and then firing the HC because they did just what you expected them to do.

My evil genius theory wants me to consider that Chud was hired as patsy, that the guy they really wanted told them he wasn't ready to come back right away but would be in 2014, and now they get the guy they wanted all along with the #4 pick to bolster him to boot.

But, really, that would be giving them WAY too much credit. In all likelihood, they're just incompetent.

motherscratcher wrote:Rumors all over twitter that Chudziznski is a very possible one and done.

What a clown show.

Chud is not what is wrong with this team. How do win in the NFL with ZERO running game and a 3rd string QB? The FO set up this tank, and tank is what we got.

Damn cold, setting the team up to fail and then firing the HC because they did just what you expected them to do.

My evil genius theory wants me to consider that Chud was hired as patsy, that the guy they really wanted told them he wasn't ready to come back right away but would be in 2014, and now they get the guy they wanted all along with the #4 pick to bolster him to boot.

But, really, that would be giving them WAY too much credit. In all likelihood, they're just incompetent.

So let's go with the fantasy. I mean who gives a fuck, let's suspend the reality of persistent suck. What if they ARE that conniving? That ruthless? Who were they waiting on? Who is their Neo?

I don't need to be patient, they're going to be shit forever. - CDT, discussing my favorite NFL team

motherscratcher wrote:Rumors all over twitter that Chudziznski is a very possible one and done.

What a clown show.

Chud is not what is wrong with this team. How do win in the NFL with ZERO running game and a 3rd string QB? The FO set up this tank, and tank is what we got.

Damn cold, setting the team up to fail and then firing the HC because they did just what you expected them to do.

My evil genius theory wants me to consider that Chud was hired as patsy, that the guy they really wanted told them he wasn't ready to come back right away but would be in 2014, and now they get the guy they wanted all along with the #4 pick to bolster him to boot.

But, really, that would be giving them WAY too much credit. In all likelihood, they're just incompetent.

So let's go with the fantasy. I mean who gives a fuck, let's suspend the reality of persistent suck. What if they ARE that conniving? That ruthless? Who were they waiting on? Who is their Neo?

My brother in law and I discussed this earlier and the answer we came to was...

Crickets.

There are names out there that SOME people would consider Neos - Cowher, Chucky, Saban, you know, the usual names.

Personally, I wouldn't want any of them.

We then went through the whole college and NFL coordinator list, and not many of them were interesting either, so I decided to personally settle on David Shaw.

This whole thing was Haslambannerdi's evil genius plan to get David Shaw and some high picks, leading this great organization into the promised land! Yeah!

mattvan1 wrote:So let's go with the fantasy. I mean who gives a fuck, let's suspend the reality of persistent suck. What if they ARE that conniving? That ruthless? Who were they waiting on? Who is their Neo?

The one man with a football mind so advanced that he can go .500 in the mighty Big 10?

mattvan1 wrote:So let's go with the fantasy. I mean who gives a fuck, let's suspend the reality of persistent suck. What if they ARE that conniving? That ruthless? Who were they waiting on? Who is their Neo?

The one man with a football mind so advanced that he can go .500 in the mighty Big 10?

(No, besides Kirk Ferentz.)

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention/get excited about him too.

He was the end game all along. That flirting with Houston was just a smokescreen.