Gold Member

I agree with those that have said that I do not feel uncomfortable talking about and insisting upon condom usage.

When I was single, I would also ask about people's HIV status. Not that their answering changed the fact that we would use condoms if we had sex---in my opinion, its good habit to be forthright. Most people either do not know their status or lie about it. People assume they are STD free until they become sick and many STDs don't have noticeabe effects until a person has been infected for some time.

In my mind, inquiring about HIV status and insisting upon condom use shows respect for both yourself and your potential sexual partners.

I don't ask. I just put one on. I don't even give them the option of suggesting otherwise. If they don't like it, well, the door is 10 feet away and they can put their clothes on and go home. This has happened to me once already, and I sent the guy on his way. Other guys have thanked me for just putting one on without them prompting me, so I figure my way is the correct way.

It should be a no-brainer in this day and age. If we're not together, we use a condom, and if we are together, we use a condom until I know I can trust you.

i dont wear condoms i hate them, i tell my partners what i like and what i dont like, its either sex ore not at all.
its a mutual decision to have sex without or not at all.
it takes two to tango and down to personal choices

Gold Member

Do I have a problem asking a partner to use a condom HELL NO! Safe sex is hot sex.

However, I do believe myself to be a bit of a hypocrite as I think that Treasure Island and Hot Desert Knights studios make some of the hottest porn point blank and I personally can't stand any Chi Chi LaRue made movies. They just suck.

Gold Member

i dont wear condoms i hate them, i tell my partners what i like and what i dont like, its either sex ore not at all.
its a mutual decision to have sex without or not at all.
it takes two to tango and down to personal choices

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You have posted several times about this, so I have to ask: how often are you tested for HIV, and are you a bug chaser?

Gold Member

...
However, I do believe myself to be a bit of a hypocrite as I think that Treasure Island and Hot Desert Knights studios make some of the hottest porn point blank and I personally can't stand any Chi Chi LaRue made movies. They just suck.

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Don't feel like a hypocrite. As jason_els said, "porn is fantasy and my fantasies do not include condoms."

Gold Member

Don't feel like a hypocrite. As jason_els said, "porn is fantasy and my fantasies do not include condoms."

All the men in those bareback movies are HIV+ or are presumed to be.

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Agreed entirely.

Protecting your HIV negative status is your responsibility alone, no one else's. Going without condoms is a fast track to infection no matter how "unlikely" your potential partner's past exposure to HIV might be, no matter how much that person reassures you.

And contrary to much of what you may hear, living with HIV is not a walk in the park. Not everyone responds to the meds nor can everyone tolerate them. And even the best regimen fails eventually, leaving you with few options.

Gold Member

Protecting your HIV negative status is your responsibility alone, no one else's. Going without condoms is a fast track to infection no matter how "unlikely" your potential partner's past exposure to HIV might be, no matter how much that person reassures you.

And contrary to much of what you may hear, living with HIV is not a walk in the park. Not everyone responds to the meds nor can everyone tolerate them. And even the best regimen fails eventually, leaving you with few options.

Life is not a porn movie.

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I want to derail a minute and just say for those of you who do not know Bbucko, this is the man who all people should listen to on the matter of AIDS. He is not speaking from sound bites or blatherings in magazines, he is speaking from his heart, his very well educated and informed mind, and his life experience. All of these are invaluable and he has even given me much to consider and a new outlook on this killer in our midst.

Bbucko, I know our conversations happened in private, but I want the world to know I thank you for spending that afternoon educatng me. I am better of for the encounter and I know Jason and Lee are better for my having talked to you. Jason and Lee are two neighbors, a long term committed gay couple in my area that are both in advanced stages of AIDS. I personally took on the task of helping them when they need it. I don't think I could have come that far without your education.

Back to the topic.

Asking your partner to use a condom? Yes you should and no you should not feel awkward about it. It shows respect for you and your partner that you would go that route.

Life is too short. It doesn't need to be made even shorter by foolish sexual judgement.