HORSEMEN OF THE ROBOPLASTIC APOCALYPSE

Saturday, June 20, 2015

I've had a great run collecting Transformers but it's time to move on. After much contemplation, I've decided I want to finish off my collection with a piece so memorable, so truly special that it will be something worthy of the honor of being my very last Transformer. It will be a figure that when I look at it on the shelf I will cry because it embodies the emotional significance of the end of my Transformers journey. It will remind me forevermore of how wonderful my life was made over the past 31 years by Hasbro's special recipe of little robotic puzzle people made from plastic and metal and rubber. It will be the capstone of my Transformers collection and my rite of passage into a true manhood where I collect only old Macross models from Bandai. And so I have decided Metal Earth Megatron will be the very last Transformer I will ever buy.

I WOULD'VE WAITED AN ETERNITY FOR TO BE LAST

Back in the 80s I never got model kits of Transformers characters where I lived and that was cosmic injustice. They made GoBots models for crying out loud! Japan got tons of Transformers model kits from Kabaya but my whole childhood passed without a single official Transformer model. That is why the Metal Earth 3-D Megatron Metal Model kit is an epic milestone for all Transformerkind worthy of the honor of being my final Transformer ever. Here at the end of my Transformer journey I finally fulfilled the lifelong dream of putting together an official Transformers model kit. And not just any one, but an actual metal version of the greatest Decepticon. Honestly it was an enormous pain in the butt cutting out and manipulating all the little pieces and getting the stubborn metal to curve around in parts. The 'ages 14+' warning is no joke and you'll find lots of complaints from upset people about how these are too hard to put together, but the challenge truly pays off in the end. I now have a gleaming metal G1 Megatron statue, shining like a trophy I earned after 30 years of being good at toy robots. This is truly the crown jewel of my collection. I'm as sure that I'm done with Transformers as I am certain that that no better version of Megatron will ever be made. So that is why, with great pride and humility, I have decided Metal Earth Megatron is the very last Transformer I will ever buy.