I'm moonlighting as someones else's bitch...

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About Me

I am a stay at home mom to 4 kids, 14,10,8,& 4. I am a bit high strung and not proud of it. I like things to be clean. I yell a lot. I am a sort of jack of all trades, master of none. I am honest, don't like getting old, wish I was cooler than I am. I am sucker for celebrity gossip, good raunchy jokes and overpriced skin care.

Therapy Disclaimer

I am a reluctant stay at home mom nearing the end of my term. I am a recovering "Suzy Homemaker". I curse. I say what's on my mind. I hope that I say things that other people are thinking, just don't have the guts to say. I hope to make people laugh at or with me. I hope not to offend too many people, but know there have been a few and am quite certain there will be several more.

So, if you are looking for a dysfunctional view on mothering, being a woman , and life- you may not be disappointed here. If you are still Suzy Homemaker and think that everyone should be, I might just make you want to vomit.

Thanks Drowsey Monkey!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

This will be my last post before my departure... sniff sniff... Friday Fragments is just the way to leave- keep you wanting more terribly confused and baffled by my randomness! You can join in on the sketchy fun over at Mrs. 4444's.

*** This has truly been a tough week. My daughter has really been struggling in her 4th grade year and it's very disconcerting. She was an 'A' and 'B' student till this year. She is now straddling 'D' and 'F' in 3 classes! We are beside ourselves and are not satisfied with the lack of communication from the teacher. This is the year at this school where they start expecting independent study and really start sticking it to 'em. The way it was put to me: The are no longer learning to read, they're reading to learn. I bring this up because it is troubling me and is on my mind, but also, I know there are a few teachers that stop by. If you have any suggestions... I would love to hear them.

*** I have a guest excerpt over at Annie's place today. That's right, it's about politics. But wait, Annie made me play nice. I couldn't even SAY the opposing candidate's name or policies- let me know how you think I did. It's definitely worth going over to read. Play nice and politics usually are not synonymous!

*** I have not packed.

*** I am hungry, but I have lost 6LBS this week! My mom just called me from Alabama and told me there is a cold front moving into Gulf Shores and the highs will be in the 70's while we're there!!! Seriously? I have been starving myself so I could wear a stinking swimsuit and summery clothes and now I have to pack my sweatshirts and capris- something just ain't fair- pass me a damn donut!

***I have spent way too much time on the computer this week. I had this cockamamie (got that word from McCain) idea of a contest and have been spending the wee hours drafting and scheduling all of these posts- what was I thinking?

*** I'm wondering what my place will look like when I come back. I'm hoping to come back to legitimate comments and not TWITTERING on my comment section-GIRLS! Remember I am 71% bitch!

*** Speaking of 71% Bitch- did anyone notice that the title of that post equalled 101%? Or are ya'll bad at math, too? Confession- I used a freaking calculator AND STILL GOT IT WRONG- and I wonder why my daughter is struggling!

*** On the topic of Why didn't I think of that?Amelia Bedelia asked if there were extra points for putting the badge on your blog. Man, that's brilliant- just another reason I don't do contests- I suck at rules and am not brilliant!

*** So yes, extra points for putting this badge on your blog or post... *** Please come and guess who the Mystery Guests are this week! Remember, there's something in it for you!

***Google Analytics and I have had a falling out. Sure "Stay at home moms masturbating" is a thing of beauty and GA is the only one that may provide that kind of richness. However, my numbers have FLAT LINED since Oct.6- Nada, nilche, nunya (as my dad says and thinks he's sooo funny- nunya what, dad? Nunya damn business! If I've heard that once , I've heard that a billion times from him) Anyway GA + my blog = zero visitors. Come on, I know I suck, but that's a little harsh, don't you think? Why do they hate me? I'm not sure. So I've left GA and am attempting Sitemeter, we'll see how he treats me.

*** Don't forget me- puhlease! I'll return with some batshit crazy stories and it may be entertaining or it may not. I'll miss you all!

24 comments:

I just saw the cold coming, and I'm headed to Charleston this weekend! Feel you're pain there.

4th grader: Is it b/c she's not studying/doing homework? Start an email daily report from the teacher (since you are always on the computer) and maybe a checklist of some sort on that. If 4th grader does well, on Fridays have surprise. My mom had to do that with brother. She demanded that the teachers giver her a daily report via email.

Re: your daughter - It'll be fine you just need to pinpoint the problem: is it reading struggles. Is it organization issues. Is she too tired to focus. There's an answer here, and the teacher needs to help you find it. I don't think kids generally nosedive in grades like that without due cause.

My daughter suddenly shocked me with a lack of organization around that age. I made the teacher check her planner every day before leaving: did she have her assignments written down? Did she have all her books? Then it was up to me to ride her at home: some kids don't transition well to the autonomy asked of them at that age.

I used to teach 4th grade and let me tell you, it is a huge adjustment. I think the other commenters gave some really great suggestions about having the teacher check the planner and emailing you more frequently with updates. My son isn't doing as well this year as he has in the past (3rd grade) so I feel your pain. There is only so much we can do as parents. They are the ones in the classroom, doing the work, taking the tests, etc.. Hopefully it will just click for her.

I just wanted to tell you that I'm having the same Google Analytics problem. I have been flatlined since September. I think I've narrowed it down to my blog redesign and since you just had one, that may be the problem. Make sure that the person who did your blog added the GA code.

4th grader: Here's the deal at my house with my 5th grader- last year they were supposed to be all independent and crap. Well, mine got all her homework done before school was out (they were given time everyday to get it finished) and NEVER brought a book home. This year, she can't remember out of habit that she has ANY homework. Now, I have to ask everyday before we leave school, "Do you have EVERYTHING?" It's ridiculous that she was given time to get it done at school... this was the year they were supposed to be more independent, not have homework help! Her grades never suffered so I didn't say anything- I work at the school as well. This year, she has missed points for not having homework completed, is having to actually try to make good grades and hates her mom because she can't do anything until homework is done. I say, talk to the teacher, see if she can help make the transition better, because if not, she's really going to be in trouble next year! I also, remember that they learn from mistakes as well. Does she care her grades are suffering? If she does the rest of the year could be better!!!

I hope you have a wonderful vacation. I am sorry about your daughter but completely understand my daughter is having the same issues and not a word. I hope she pulls her grades up. I am also in school which I think is affecting things so I need to buckle down more on all of us. Good luck finding something that works for you and your daughter.

Your FF posts never disappoint, Tena. And BTW, I must compliment you on your spelling; you are quite the speller of those big words you use (seriously; I'm impressed :) Have fun wherever you're going. Off to find out where that is...

My 4th grader is getting good grades, but has turned into this little, venom-spewing being. We barely recognize her. I asked her why she's being so mean and she told me it was because of the pressure at school. Sweet.

GA is a jerk. Don't listen to him.

Screw the temperature and wear those clothes you've been starving yourself to get into! Have fun, be safe!

Ok sitemeter never updated Dana and she just quit it. Just saying. I hope you have a super time and are you SURE you don't want hundreds of comments? Okay fine. I won't organize or join in. sheesh. Killjoy.