You could allus get the local fire department to come down and give you a rousing chorus of the songs the sirens sang ... question is, who gets lashed at - sorry, I mean to the mast?

Oh, and I had a teacher in about year 3 of primary school who would have made an amazing Gorgon, no makeup required. There's bound to be one just like her in your vicinity. About 55, embittered, divorced, recently given up smoking and no fashion sense. Ask around!

Slightly off theme (park), but you could always get the local tax department officials to set up an office in your park. It would be called "The Greenback Fleece" theme ride. You get turned upside and shaken until all your dosh falls into their hands. You could be called Jason for the occasion, I suppose!

My critics maintain that a Knight-Ridder news report that Bush is punting on some of the issues is an editorial statement accusing him of unscrupulousness

But I maintain that while "punts" might not have been exactly the correct word to use here, that it was not consciously intended by the K-R reporter to be pejorative and that most news organizations (except possibly Fox) intend their news stories to be neutral in tone

You go to a bar where there's a gaggle of men hanging around. Everyone ignores you. A dog comes up and pees on your leg. A barmaid leaves some other guy at the table they've been sharing and throws herself at you.

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