Monday, February 14, 2011

Lovey Dovey Messy Times (shrimp skewers-sides-dessert)

One week later...

Last week I had written this well executed blog post, the idea was fresh and new and I thought the content would mean something to people. The food included was beautiful and it all came together within the hour that Wes was taking his nap. When Wes woke, I heard his cry and picked my computer up off my lap, as I did the cord unplugged and PEEWWM my computer shut off. I lost the whole post. I was sad that day of course, I tried to let it go and took it as a message to invest in a new battery for my computer. However, today as I sit back down a week later and try to recreate it I am finding it can't be done. I have to completely let it go and start over.

Does this ever happen to you?

You go to tell someone a story and get interrupted and then the story circles and circles in your mind until you are able to set it free? This happens to me all the time! I like to talk, I am an extrovert, and I learned recently that this is how I process information. By telling those stories (the nagging circling ones), I am processing how "the scenario" made me feel, what was there for me to learn, how I could make it better or leave it alone the next time. When I sat down at the computer today, I told myself that I would not mention my erased blog post, that what was past was past. That no one wants to read about best intentions. But then found the story circling and realized that I was not going to be able to move on from this one so easily.

The next day...

Another day has passed since I wrote the above sentiments and I am feeling relieved of the lost blog post story. *sigh*

I learned about my extrovert processing while I was in counseling after Wesley was born. It was such an Aha for me (has that been coined as a phrase yet? oh Oprah). When Chop and I were first dating and learning how to navigate a relationship with one another, I would get so frustrated as I voiced whatever concern, love, fear, etc--because he would seemingly just be SITTING there. Not saying or thinking a thing! Time after time I would get all worked into a tizzy, tears and all, and he would shut down..or that was how I was perceiving it. Our conversations would start as this little "hey about that...", you know like a light breeze--and a storm would be raging by the end of it and he would have only said about 2 words. I was tornading out of control, picking up debris, feelings, hidden sentiments, along the way. A few times I swear I saw a cow swirling in the air above my living room (Twister reference--should have warned against that one).

I always felt better after getting it all out, but also always felt a little jaded by not getting through to him and leaving the conversation with some resolve. Without fail Chopper would come to me 2 or 3 days later with a clear perspective on how he saw the situation, and if he saw my view as being an appropriate one he would make the change--right then and there.

Like the time we saw An Inconvenient Truth in the theater and he traded his brand new Ford F250 in for a Toyota Yaris a week later. No long drawn out discussion, no publicly weighing options, no blogging about it or discussion forums, just introspective thought, boom- bam done.

Chopper experiences life as an introvert, as I experience it as an extrovert (you can imagine which appears a little neater in practice). I have to get it all OUT and he has trouble getting it out sometimes, though does well with having things processed within. My way to a conclusion looks like a long and windy road, as his appears to be a straight invisible road, but a road non the less.

So it seems I have come full circle with this new post--- my lost post was about how he's neat and I'm messy and the lessons we learn from living in that experience. And my need to process that story publicly brought me to our other messy reality, lay it all out there or hold it all in...neither is right or wrong, and when you are able to appreciate the other's process it will only bring clarity, light and love to life.

Yesterday was Valentine's Day and I think I needed to write a little about the one I love, with this expulsion process I am able to move into full appreciation for him and what he provides for my life. Though today is just another February 15th day, may I remind you that red and pink cards, flowers, and chocolates are all ON SALE today, so as my "depression era" grandparents would do---keep celebrating!

Here is a romantic post Valentine's day meal for you and your intro/extro honey (whatever they may be, cuz it's probably opposite yourself).

Aesthetics matter! When it comes to food, look how beautiful and they taste great too.

What does YOUR relationships have to do with FOOD? Same thing your spirituality, exercise, thought patterns, sleep patterns, and career paths do--EVERYTHING. Want to know more of what I'm talking about? Visit www.PersephoneBrown.com

2 comments:

hiking-rhode-island
said...

It's all yin/yang (the relationship and Wes's photos) Not sure where he got the intro stuff from -- both his parents are extro!This desert looks great and I love all the colors in the food.Love to all 3 of you.

I'm intro, Patrick is mostly intro, but we both can function as extro. However the processing he talks I think/write. It drives him crazy to wait two days until I'm ready to talk or he has to read a blog post about it!!!

About Me

I am a Health Counselor and now a mom, living on Block Island(about 13 miles out). I give people direction in an other wise confusing world of food, mood, and health. I see good people feeling like poo and I think good people should feel GOOD! A clean diet that works for you as an individual leads to vibrancy, love, peace, a clean environment, and a clean you. No more sick, sad, and angry.
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