Tuesday, February 07, 2012

About Me

I told you my nerves were shot. Sometimes it seems like I have a gazillion people all pawing at me, wanting stuff. Then I get home and I've got about a million dogs and cats all pawing at me, wanting stuff. Everyone around me demanding something, and nobody ever gives back to me. Bunch of leaches, sucking me dry. Sometimes, every now and again, I've got to get away. I've got to do something for me. Today, I went to the zoo.

By myself.

It was wonderful. Nobody clamoring for attention. Nobody asking me what such and such means, or can I do thus and so, or can I fix something so and so messed up Nobody yelling at me for--well, for anything. Today,. I was doing something I wanted to do.

For myself.

The day was chilly, and the zoo was nearly empty. No crowds. No shrieking kids. Just me and the animals. I could get close enough to take pictures without getting a thousand heads in the way. I could stand and watch the animals all I wanted, without anyone shoving to get in front of me. It was relaxing.

Maybe not this relaxing.

But relaxing nonetheless. I enjoyed myself. I enjoyed my day. I needed this day.

Tomorrow, it's back to the rat race. Back to the demands. Back to the questions. Back to the yelling. Back to the pawing.

But today at least, it was all about me.

P.S. I'll get the rest of the photos I took uploaded over the next few days. Right now, I'm going to bed. After I take care of these dogs that are demanding attention.

I wish I could take more mental health days, but I need to save my vacation days for when we cut back to 4 days a week in the fall. I'm just not quite sure what it is I'm supposed to be saying no to. I can't just not show up to work. Well, I can, but I'd lose my job. And I can't just refuse to do my job once I get there. Well, I can, but I'd lose my job. I do say no to the dogs every now and again, but skipping their long walks isn't good for their health or mine.