i'm going to attempt a post in the original spirit of message boards and generally discuss funny things that happened in elementary school.

feel free to add on.
Or just feel free to call me a faggot and post a funny picture or if not just ignore this and it will go away never to be remembered within a couple hours.

1. during PE chris harrell threw a minifootball the entire length of the gym and accidentally hit mrs. pearce square in her temple at the exact moment she was walking by the door that led to the "ball room." mrs. pearce fell into a pile of balls and we laughed and laughed.

2. me and bryan fedsterman went into math class early, rolled way ahead on the plastic dry erase tablet for the overhead projector, drew pictures of c0ks, then rolled it back. after a few examples of long division the teacher rolled our c0ks onto screen. we laughed and laughed.

3. jamie fain sneezefarted in history class. we laughed and laughed.

4. larry higdon poured "swish" (does anyone else know about flouride enriched aptly named swish that you had to swish around in your mouth once a week?) into mrs. aldridge's coffee. she drank it. we laughed and laughed. larry got suspended for like 2 weeks.

5. taurice crisp got in a fight and ended up punching mr. trache when he tried to break it up and afterwards was so excited he barfed all over the place. we laughed and laughed. taurice ended up shooting up a pool hall a few years later and partially paralyzed an innocent bystander lol. a few years after that he got murdered over cocaine lol.

1. Our principal, Mr Snyder, got caught shoplifting St. John's Bay polo shirts out of a local JC Penneys in 7th grade. He was pulled over down the street from the mall by state police after swerving eratically from lane to lane. As soon as the cop approached him, he confessed to the theft, breath reeking of alcohol. Police initially pulled him over on a suspicious vehicle call. 6-7 kids got suspended in the following days for making fun of the fgt who was placed on sabbatical leave.

2. During our basketball unit before Mr. Langas officially started class, about 15 kids turned around and started throwing balls at Ed Nott who was beamed in the head several times, causing him to fall to the ground and convulse.

3. Mr Langas was placed on leave after visiting the school lunchroom wearing his regular Jack Tripper type aqu colored 80's shorts. He went to talk to a table full of girls, put his leg up on the bench and his ckock dropped out of the leghole.

4. Someone started a rumor about Eric Ross in 6th grade. The rumor was that he attempted to stick a chiquita banana into his ass during some school trip. He was called "Chiquita" for 3 years and often his bookbag was taken at lunch, filled with bananas and then stomped on..leaving a disgusting goo covering his books.

In 5th grade one day I was playing with a pencil, spinning it around and such to relieve boredom. Then I picked it up and sneezed at the same time. I ended up stabbing myself in the nose and it started bleeding, a lot. I got to go home early, so it was all good.

All through middle school, I was friends with a guy who got a bunch of stink bomb things. They were little cardboard boxes that, once you smashed them, made an area smell like farts, skunk, and rotten eggs for a long time. So one day I got about 30 of them from him and put them around the intersection of the two main halls of the school during the after lunch recess, when all students were supposed to be in the cafeteria or outside. So no distractions. I put some in the nearby bathrooms, a couple slipped into lockers, some in trash cans, one tossed up onto a hanging light, and a few just laying in the middle of the hall as a distraction. I went to a different bathroom to wash the stink off of me (smashing the locker and light ones in my hands was a bad idea...). I came back when lunch was over and people were heading back to class. Everyone was covering their noses and sprinting through the area. Two kids even threw up. It was glorious.

Jacob Sworsky and I (John) used to get in trouble all the time in sixth grade, and our teacher Mrs. Kalachman would always yell, "John! Jacob!" And then the entire class, without fail, every time it happened, would scream "Jingleheimer Schmidt!!!"

So basically, whenever we got in trouble together, the whole class would get in trouble for causing a big disturbance. That was Mrs. Kalachman's first year teaching, too. We drove her nuts some days.

Jacob Sworsky and I (John) used to get in trouble all the time in sixth grade, and our teacher Mrs. Kalachman would always yell, "John! Jacob!" And then the entire class, without fail, every time it happened, would scream "Jingleheimer Schmidt!!!"

So basically, whenever we got in trouble together, the whole class would get in trouble for causing a big disturbance. That was Mrs. Kalachman's first year teaching, too. We drove her nuts some days.

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That reminds me of an awesome one. My 6th grade teacher was Richard Dickerman. So, my friends and I would call him Dick or Mr. Dick to make fun of him. He got so angry one day that he basically screamed at us to shut the hell up and stop making fun of people. We got back at him by going to the school counselors and saying that his yelling at us was scary and made it uncomfortable to be around him, cause he might do it again. He was forced to apologize to us in front of the whole class.

My friend accused me of finding people falling down stairs to be funny, so i told him the him falling down the stairs would be funny, every person that i went up to I said "hey have a mental image of Craigy falling down stairs" and they'd all P*ss themselves.