While so many of the tabloids and glossies are hellbent on bathing daily in freshly spilled blood of their famous quarry, it's nice to know that People is unafraid to dedicate the occasional celebrity sacrifice to the gods of Hollywood positivity and call down from the heavens a feel-good, cleansing deluge of Care Bears, gumdrops, and the fluffiest kittens imaginable. You know what, Rosario? We think we will have that cookie! Maybe two!