This is not madness. THIS. IS. FOOLISHNESS!!!

Thank. God. I thought I’d never make it this far into the week. Ridiculously busy at work! Rough commute! It snowed!!! Sheesh! Good thing I had blogs to get me through. Here’s some of what I saw…Susie LindauSmooshed Her Boobs. DJ Matticus’ Prince fought a Great Battle! And WhiteladyInTheHood had a run-in with…well… Bunny Tails. Sort of.

Thanks to them and everyone else for a whole lot of great reading this week!

Wrong. For ANY gender.

But last week, sex was on everyones minds. Especially when we asked about turning into the opposite sex. And wow, did you people have some interesting thoughts on the subject. (Seriously, get help!) Here’s what you said. (As always, my comments are androgynous in italics.)Figure out if it’s really all that hard to aim into the BOWL (Samara)(Of course it isn’t. Sinks are wide! Oh..waitaminute..)Words can’t describe the assault I would lay siege to my new apparatus (Samara)(For that, grunts are better than words.)Say feck loudly and in a deep voice, while scratching my balls :-\ Indecisive Eejit(RuPaul? Is that you?)make sure the snozberries still tasted like snozberries. thematticuskingdom(That’s the last time I’m checking Urban Dictionary for definitions.)immediately steal The Queen’s title. thematticuskingdom(CATFIGHT!!!)check the calendar to see if it was some sort of Freaky Friday. thematticuskingdom(Doublecheck that it isn’t 1976.)Poke someone… Yes of course with my finger 😉 lol Andro(Whew! Because you can take someone’s eye out with those other things!)Flirt a lot more than usual, hey I’m kidding 🙂 Andro(What is more than an “infinite” amount?)Slap myself twenty times… Shouting get me out of here – Andro(Two men enter. One man…umm…nevermind)prove that men can have multiple orgasms. Aussa Lorens(We don’t because of the dehydration risks.)Finally be able to kill my own spiders. The Sailor’s Woman(Well that’s not taking very good care of your pets…)become a militant feminist and chide my former self for intense dumbness (Trent)(WE HAVE A WINNER!!!)Fart and blame it on the dog, yell at the TV and pretend to fix stuff. Kayjai(Even better if you don’t own a dog!)Listen to the song “If I were a boy” by Beyonce? #WeirdIKnow(So…bad taste in music regardless of gender?)Slap myself across the face repeatedly just so I could wake up from this horror(So you’re still into that, regardless of gender?)take a duckface selfie (Stacy)(At least you’ll be able to hide it behind facial hair.)scream(Like a little girl?)wear kilts and suits! NBI(You can get a mankini. Good for any gender!)have serious balls. (Nadia)(If you’d grown up with them, they’d probably be more playful…)Do a pee, leave the seat up and think HARD about WHY I do something so annoying! Miss Lou(Or revel in doing it the right way!)Be dumber than I was before I went to sleep Elyse 54.5(Yes…but you wouldn’t care!)Scratch myself in public and then spit on the ground in front of myself(Hmm…not sure which gender you’re changing to…)get a big set of fake boobs!! SnB(Oh, I have a pair of those mounted on the wall.)(Zoe) Wonder why I had a man in my bed(Because if he were under it, it would lead to a whole lot of questions…)(Zoe) I would have a new toy to play with.(Careful it doesn’t go off while you’re cleaning it…)Be boring as hell! SnaapyG(We prefer to think of it as “being introspective”.)Find out which organ I really think with… (Gretchen, drifting through.com)(No thinking involved.)
(With either of them.)…be glad to give my brain a break from doing all the thinking. (Miz Yank)(Or start thinking about important stuff!)Make my husband, 37, get a sex change — Linda Vernon(Just don’t let him do it with his own tools!)In my best Corleone way I would yell out “I GET TO ACT LIKE A MAN” Marie Nicole(I thought every man acted like a boy?)play with my new boobies… Twindaddy(You wouldn’t return them when you changed back, would you.)earn 20 cents more on the dollar and never again wait in line for a restroom!(Wait in line? We just pee outside when it’s crowded.)PMAO… be glad I have long, sexy legs.(Nono, this is after the sex change.)still write about my naughty bits – Rutabaga(What, no video?)Refuse to answer the question for fear of reprisal. (Frank)(If these polls have taught me anything, it’s that there are no right answers.)Enjoy peeing standing up. (Deanna)(Why not? I often enjoy it then! Or while walking…)see if scratching my junk is all that it’s cracked up to be. Polysyllabic Profundities(Once you scratch junk, all else is…bunk!(?))Relish having one thought at a time. Bliss! – Sandy Mitchell(Mmm…relish…)I would never reduce myself to a single orgasm entity. – Sandy Mitchell(There’s an amoeba joke in there somewhere…)

Congratulations to Trent for this weeks winning answer! (And we hope he uses his prize to work out his issues.) And from the offered choices, the most popular was still look great. So congratulations on all the self confidence!This week, Easter is coming right before Passover leaves. But instead the end of the weekend, this poll is about what happens at the beginning. Good Friday! What could be better than that.
Well, that’s what we’d like to know.Answer often, but answer soon, because this one closes at 2359 EDT on Tuesday, 22 April. Try and keep yourself to three Other answers if you do write-ins, and if you do leave an Other, add a way to recognize you at the end, and I’ll link back to you next week.

Take Our Poll
And since the new Captain America is out (good flick. Stay til the end of the credits.), enjoy this as we head into the weekend.
See you…out there.

I LOVE your Friday posts. Sorry you had such a crazy week. Hope you have a looooong, lazy weekend!
xo Mama
(PS: I will SO join in one of these polls…as soon as I figure out how to answer in the little “other” space. I’m a good mama, but a technically challenged chica)

“Seriously, get help” Ha,ha,ha!! That about sums up what we all need to do. Those were some crazy answers! So glad you survived this horrible week, Guapisimo! Happy Easter to you and may next week be filled with less FOOLISHNESS!

Well I spent Good Friday shopping with the worlds sexiest husband!! He bought me underwear and a pair of pyjamas pants from the men’s section coz I couldn’t find any I liked in the women’s section. He’s wearing them now. So I’m just leaving that open to get the best comment out of you. Oh and I surfed too. (Did I just say that?)

DISCLAIMER: *The authors of Guapola, it’s subdivisions, culinary programs and anti-gravity research department would like to confirm that this is a humor blog only.
Any attempts by any readers to attempt anything mentioned here is acknowledged as a bad idea and we urge the attemptor to seek professional counseling as soon as possible.* 😉

I cannot believe it snowed! It alerted down here Tuesday night. I had to make an emergency batch of soup! Also I love all the poll responses. Hubs and I are now discussing what we’d do in that scenario…talk about an interesting start to the weekend.

Hi there…I’m new to the blogosphere, so when I voted in the poll I didn’t know to identify myself before posting. I wrote in about BFF.

Also, coincidentally (must be something in the air) I just posted a humor piece in which I also talk about wishing I could pee like a man and write my name in the snow. Now I will read the links above, thanks for posting them 🙂

Guap! Sorry I have been absent, and thanks for your sentiments about Riley’s friend Nina… long two weeks. I have two transgender friends; one is in transition, and I am helping her create her new look, and the other has been a woman for so many years, it’s simply not an issue.

Having said that, those answers were a freaking scream. And the pic of Vladimir Putin in his suspendered Speedo? Priceless. This is but one reason why I love you!! Amy