What you’re missing out on when you’re not trying to

Disclaimer: People mentioned in this article are real but kept anonymous so as not to single them out.

The human mind is amusingly complex when it comes to matters pertaining emotions. Some say our ability to feel and have abstract emotions is the only thing that separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom. There are hundreds of elements to how we think, which makes understanding the whole process such a strenuous ordeal. A minuscule but immensely consequential complexity that should be noted is our inability to commit to anything, regardless of the magnitude of the engagement.

No one ever says “yes” upon being asked anymore. It doesn’t matter if the question is “Do you wanna hang out later?” or “Will you be my girlfriend?”; people never say yes immediately even if they want to.

“Give me some time; I don’t want to rush into something that might not work out” was the excuse an anonymous senior female employed.

“I like her, but I worry about girls here, man. Something always goes wrong after the first month. I’m trying to keep my options open, you know?”, said a senior during a casual conversation in the hallways in the 1000 building.

The thought process is simple — the idea that a much better opportunity could present itself at a later point in time, which would mean one would miss out on something far better than the arrangement already present. Some argue that it is only common sense for one to practice measures that tend to avert considerable regret; however, the other side of the bigger picture is never thoroughly thought about.

People are so excessively fixated on the prospect that they become blind to the plethora of marvel already in front of them. A person will pass on a relationship with an individual because they “need more time” — time to see if there are better fish in the sea. A friend will “wait to see if they can hang later”, when all they are waiting for is if a better invitation pops up in their inbox.

“I’ll try to come to Star Wars, but I don’t know though”, is the alibi a senior’s best friend used recently to get out of a movie arrangement.

This anomaly transcends the superficial dimensions of the high school teenager scene and significantly affects people in the long run as well. A person will pass on an opportunity of a lifetime, expecting a better opportunity of a lifetime to come their way. Such opportunities could be a dream job, long-awaited vacation or simply a mere activity.

Though it is always propitious to look ahead and do what is best for oneself, the idea of living ultimately becomes convoluted because of such a mindset. Living should not be spent waiting for something better, not for the most part at least. We use the term “living” instead of “existing” for a reason. We live and then we die; we do not exist forever. We should live keeping the postulate of a limited life in mind. Don’t wait around too long for a slightly better person or a marginally higher paying job. The grass is not always greener on the other side, and in time there won’t even be a you to cross that fanciful fence onto a pasture only fractionally better than the last.