Wednesday, 5 November 2014

Operation: Make Ends Meet

This coming January I will turn 41. Remember those "After-School Specials" on tv? You know the ones that were light in the acting department, yet chock full of wisdom and valuable life-lessons? Well that's me. I'm an after-school special telling kids to stay-in-school, choose the right school, and the right subject for THEM, at said school.

I didn't do that, and I'm sorry if I sound like one of those "do as I say, not as I did" kind of bloggers.
Come to think of it, my dilly-dallying when it came to my schooling, is likely a god-send in the long run. I mean, I'm a tree-hugging animal-lover so of course, I dreamed of being a Veterinarian. I even switched Mathematics in high school just so that I could get into that course at Guelph University. I remember how responsible I felt when I was doing that. I was planning my future ... laying down a path ... and making the changes needed. But by the time I finally scraped by grade 12 advanced Mathematics with a mark of 53%, I had already come to terms with the fact that I would never be a Veterinarian. Thank Goddess for my faulty brain, or my reality may see me stuck with a huge-ass tuition bill working in an industry that's supposed to love animals, but only loves money.

What changed my mind? When I was 16 I had to euthanize my very first horse Rusty. Rusty was ... so amazing. My mom bought her for $125, removed her from the field of heifers she called friends, and brought her to me. She thought she was a cow, but she may as well have been Big Ben or Secretariat because to me, she was everything. The day I said goodbye to her, was the day I said goodbye to that Veterinarian dream. How could I ever re-live that pain on a day-to-day basis?

So from there I considered Veterinary Technician, but I scoffed at that measly $30K salary. Ya ... I know eh? Hilarity at it's best. I barely make half that these last few years and yet it seemed like so little back then.

Y'know how you hear people say they wanna see themselves as their dogs see them? Well I wanna see myself through those naive yet confident 17 year old eyes I had back then.

I was stuck on animals, so from there I fell into the romanticized world of Horses. Somehow I had convinced myself that shoveling shit, getting kicked & stepped on, and living dusty was what I wanted. I ended up going to Kemptville College for Equine Studies where you take your horse with you. Oh KCAT will never be the same.

Before Rusty passed, she gave me Mia. Yes it was a planned pregnancy, but the result of a quick weekend romp. The farmer charged me a 2-4 of beer for the service~which I hope he shared with the stud! Eleven long months later came Mia. She was a miracle to say the least.

At the risk of boring you, I'll suffice it to say that my misdirected education continued for far too long after this. Basically, from start to finish I could someday be a full-service shop!

I could train your horse,
I could cut, perm, colour your hair.
I could list and sell your house (licensing pending)
I could arrange a mortgage on your house purchase (once again, licensing pending)
I could sell you a car~ not very well, but I could.
I could arrange the financing for that car and,
I could sell you Rust-proofing, Extended Warranties, and Insurances.
I could cook you a meal safely.
I could tend your bar responsibly.

So welcome to today ... where I just got a third part-time job. Yep that's what it takes in 2014.

My second part-time job is for a marketing company who does relines. Basically, I move products around according to a planogram. Yesterday I kinda effed up, and didn't do the math. I had to go to the store and do 5 audits that were to take me 15 minutes each. More importantly, each audit paid me 15 minutes of $12. I paid $10 for a cab there ... and I paid $10 for the cab ride home. And I made $15 in total. I may have to fax the paperwork for those audits and that should cost me anywhere from $5 to $10. Do that math. It's gross.

And today, the CBC was all abuzz because the head of the Bank of Canada has come out and said that with today's shaky employment scene, teens should work for free to gain experience.

There ya go kids .... stay in school so you can kick this douche-bag to the curb.