Truth in Advertising: The New Dove Soap Commercial

Oh how sad! They think they look one way, but then when an entirely objective sketch artist (in no way biased by the agenda of the ad agency paying him) draws another sketch based on a witness (in no way biased by the agenda of the ad agency paying her), she looks way more pretty.

This, of course, means something something.

In reality?

Who gives a crap what we think we look like?

Take a look at this pic, Dove Advertising Agency! And then lick my scrotundae.

See, kids, this is a prime example of why you should keep to yourself when you hear strange sounds and screaming through the thin walls at Motel 6.

Five minutes before this picture was taken, we had one semi-dismembered prostitute.

Then some poor college kid on spring break thought it’d be funny to bust up in there and document the proceedings. Now we have a semi-dismembered prostitute AND a semi-dismembered college kid. Vera and Merle here will play with their bones and wear their faces as ski caps.