Sunday, August 21, 2011

A Totally Unsolicited Proclamation, Illuminating Nothing

So, this came to me, from former Deadspin commentor International_Poise_Conspiracy. I think I can verify the identity: It's written in the characteristic faux-eloquence that suggests a person with a vast appreciation of poetic prose and a tenuous grip on the English language. Plus laudanum.

"While it is nice for my asinine, FORGETTABLE self to forever be remembered by the Cool Kids Table, I must report I am not Analysis Rube. However much he and I might agree, I have no idea what he is on about, and only learned of him on one of my once every two or three days stops at the Spin to see what is hep in the world of sport.

As well, I should point out, after my whooping by Barry Petchesky, I acted like a man, or as much like a man as a pantywaist lard ass like I am can pact like a man, and trifles not with Deadspin, as commenter, anymore. I did try, once, to comment, postban, but only via quip, not harangue. It went nowhere, and I gave up. I suppose I am tiring of being not funny.

Which is improvement, no?"

So, that solves the mystery of which I have zero knowledge. A cursory search tells me Analysis Rube is some chump the ninja has been grappling with for a short while. It can't have been IPC - it's simply too coherent. There's something wonderfully charming about IPC's always-disintegrating style - it's as if the peyote kicks in mid-sentence, and a simple idea is turned into a cooky, nearly-indecipherable word-salad.

So there you have it. International_Poise_Conspiracy is not Analysis Rube.

I'm with Anonymous on this. I lurk far more than I post but even having the notion that you might end up on MBA later would prevent dozens of awful comments each week. Either way you're all twatwaffles. At least until the actual twatwaffle is unmasked.