Six Things To Do Before Filing For Divorce

Six Things To Do Before Filing For Divorce

Posted By
O'Sullivan Law Group

Make no mistake about it, divorce is hard. Even if you and your spouse
expect to have an amicable dissolution, the emotional and financial challenges
that come with divorce can make it one of the most difficult things you’ll
ever go through in your life.

Many people are blindsided by divorce and haven’t taken the necessary
steps to ready themselves for the reality of the proceedings. However
there are a few key things you can do before starting down the road to
divorce to empower yourself and put yourself in the most favorable position possible.

1. Know your finances. It’s important to have access to financial records during the divorce
process. I counsel my clients to obtain general, if not detailed, knowledge
of their assets, debts, income, and expenses prior to filing for divorce.
The most helpful scenario is when a client has gathered detailed financial
information from other sources, such as contacting a business manager
to acquire financial statements or calling an accountant to get their
tax returns. Ultimately, the more information a client can put together
beforehand, the easier it is at the onset because we’re able to
immediately start crafting a strategic plan for him or her.

2. Get your affairs in order. It’s important to be proactive about updating estate plans, signing
wills, refinancing an asset and taking care of other financial transactions
before pursuing a divorce. In California and some other states, once you
file for divorce automatic temporary restraining orders go into effect,
meaning you may not be able to complete these transactions.

3. Set money aside. It’s common to keep an emergency fund to pay for living expenses
in case you lose your job and the same holds true for divorce. People
should set aside a similar amount of liquid money especially if you have
less control over the finances, because your spouse may cut you off when
you file. On a side note, if you have concerns about your spouse taking
valuables from your home, such as jewelry or important documents, you
should keep those assets in a safety deposit box or have someone else
who you trust hold onto them for you

4. Keep a journal. When custody is at stake, keeping a journal can help demonstrate to the
court your level of involvement with your children, and also a spouse’s
lack of involvement. This journal may include relevant emails and text
messages, as well as calendars showing activities you were present for
and events your spouse missed. It’s critical for non-custodial parents
to show that they are involved in their children’s lives —
that they have been at school events, doctor visits, and birthday parties,
and that they know teachers’ names and their children’s curriculum.
Without this history of involvement before filing, it’s going to
be much harder to prove your behavior in order to increase your time with
your children.

5. Avoid social media. Social media has become powerful evidence in divorce cases. I advise clients
to refrain from posting compromising material such as sharing about drinking
or partying. Everything you do through social media outlets is discoverable
and if you go back and delete incriminating posts right before filing,
you could be destroying evidence — which is illegal. Venting about
your spouse through social media is also a no-no, as these posts may also
be used during the proceedings.

6. See a therapist. When you’re going through a divorce, it helps to have a safe and
confidential haven where you can express yourself. And you can be assured
that what you talk about with your therapist is protected and cannot be
introduced as evidence in court. Trained mental health professionals can
be of real assistance, helping you feel more confident and in control
during this difficult process. – Shared by Huntington Post