It’s important

So this last Saturday was my aunt’s birthday and her kids and I managed to put together a little surprise birthday party for her. It was a little difficult to pull off, but we did it. In the moment she walked in and saw everything with everyone singing, she began to cry and that moment for me was priceless.

A lot of times, we tend to lose sight of the things that really count. We forget those things that are really important and that’s why I decided to write this, to remind us. We have family, we have friends and we have loved ones. Are you really there for them when they need you? or are you too busy caught up in your own thing that you forget there are others besides you?

You know what’s funny about life? Most times, we have knowledge. Like we know these things, I think they call it common sense; but we never really function with it. Life goes beyond chasing ambitions and pursuing wild dreams. It goes beyond “making money so your children will not suffer.” It goes beyond finding comfort for yourself alone all of the time. Life goes beyond doing things and living for yourself alone. There’s more to it. Someone I respect deeply said “when one dies, it doesn’t count whether they were the most hardworking but whether they were the most impactful.” I keep talking about impact because it is extremely important. If you’re not adding value to anyone around you, you might as well be dead. That might sound harsh but it’s the truth! What’s the purpose of living if no one can attest to how much you have added to them?

Let’s get back to the main point. Your family, your friends, your loved ones, they need you. Not just to bear the title of “father” or “mother” or “sibling” or “friend” but for you to actually be there for them. Lend a helping hand, a listening ear, offer a kind word… It’s not so much the material gifts we offer as the emotional support we give. Like I said, these are things we know. We just never really function with them. You don’t believe me? Let’s run a little test here. When was the last time you told that sibling that you loved them? Or you’re assuming that because they know it, then there’s no need for you to remind them? When last did you go out of your way to do something nice for that loved one? Really, it’s the little things that count. But like I said, sometimes we get too caught up in the “big” things and we forget.

No matter how busy you get, never forget that you have family and friends who need you. People around you should not pay you compliments out of a sense of duty but more because you deserve it. It’s important that you remember birthdays and anniversaries. If your memory isn’t that great, make use of calenders and reminders. Remember special events that are important to the ones close to you. Even if you can’t be there, you should at least be able to do something to let them know that you remembered and you regret being unable to be there with them. You should also try to make it up to them. That’s how they know you really care. I’m not the expert at being there all the time and going out of my way to do nice stuff, but I do try and I’m also using this as a reminder for myself.

It’s a new week and I want to challenge you to go out of your way and do something nice for the ones that are really close to you. Even if your job is saving the world, I tell you, all of that would count for nothing if you lose the ones closest to you. The reason is simple. No one will ever have your back like family. When the chips are down, they’ll likely be all you’ve got. Keep this in mind, family isn’t necessarily about blood ties but about heart ties. The woman whose birthday was on Saturday? I call her mummy and we aren’t even related but I love her, very much. At the end of the week, I’ll shed more light on this in my post on balance, but till then, I hope you enjoyed this. 🙂

So here’s to you. New week, a new chance to do things right. If they’re important to you, let them know. Re-affirm your affections for them. Call them up, send a nice text, prepare a nice meal, take them out, spend quality time with them. Whatever you do, however you do it, let those people know they are special to you. Be nice enough to share this and let me know how this works for you.

Yeah, she probably felt on top of the world at that moment. The validations we give to loved ones truly go a very long way to say the least. I’m glad you made the call. And yes, that was probably the most important thing you did last week. Please, never stop making those calls as often as you can and add visits too! Thanks for your feedback! Cheers 🙂

🙂 Thank you dear. And yes, the most important thing in life is the relationships we have because after all said and done, you will always have people around you, even when everything else passes away. Cherish them, like you rightly said. Thanks for your feedback dear, I appreciate. Cheers 🙂

This is an important lesson for people like me that find it cumbersome expressing emotions, and thereby failing to appreciate the people around us. I’ll even put down a people folder in my omnifocus to remind me of people I need to keep in touch with. Good one, Oge. 🙂

lol. I like the way you said people like you. In truth, everyone at some point or the other fails to appreciate those that really care about them and those they really care about too. It’s something we all need to constantly work on. If you don’t express your feelings, how are they supposed to know how you feel? Oh well, I’ll definitely ask you about that people folder when next we see so be sure to have it o! lol. Thanks for your feedback dear. I appreciate you, more than you’ll ever know! 🙂

Keeping in touch isn’t disturbance. It could be difficult when one is extremely busy but we must try. people are not objects, they are human beings with feelings and we all run on emotions. They need to know that you care and beyond knowing, they need you to constantly reassure them. I’m glad you found this useful sis. Thank you so much for your feedback, I truly appreciate! Love u too! cheers 🙂

Hey Girl, lovely post!!! You truly stole my thoughts . This has been on my mind and was going to be my next post. But to be honest, you did an amazing job as always. On our jobs and in many places, we are replaceable with the snap of two fingers. It is important that we recognise that friends and family for whom we are irreplaceable are an absolute priority. And like you said, it is not really the big things as much as it is prioritising and truly showing that we care. Thank you for this insightful post. Helps one decide to make time for the bigger stones, every other thing sorts itself out eventually.

Awwww. Sorry I stole your thoughts. Lol. And u’re absolutely correct! We can be replaced at our jobs in the snap of a finger. But families don’t operate the same way. We must get our priorities right. Family first always. Thank u Grace. Your comments are always encouraging. God bless u! 🙂

Yes, I’ve been offline for a while and now I’m back ‘ere to catch up on what iMissed.
So iTried somethin’ out, still am anyways. I’ve been off for a little over a week now, and tho’ I’m back on now, iChose to not update at all. Surprisingly, I’m as good as still off ‘cos e’erybadi’s waitin’ for an update before they remember that iStill live.
Its sad. Normally iCare too much. I put a call across, a text if iCan and best of all, offline msgs so when they’re back on, they see that iChecked up.
Now, iCan’t keep bein’ the fool. I’m learnin’ (learnt sef) to not give a SHIT ’bout nobadi no more except myself. Sad as it may seem, truth is they jez don’ care. Even the so-called ones called “friends”. Only one person called and even went far as offerin’ me subscription if that were my problem. And normally, iWon’t ever classify him in the first of 10 persons were iTo make mention of these “friends”.
I’m so sorry wife buh when life throws darts at u, u must duck to stay safe. This post is one hard muffin chewed let alone be swallowed. Leave pain aside, I’m past that now.
Still its a lovely post. Someone’ll learn from it.

Hmmn.Husby, I’m really sorry that this happened. In truth, most times we expect too much from the wrong people. Plus sometimes people really do fail to see the importance of checking up on others. It’s why I wrote this article so we can all learn. I’m not even perfect myself. I’ve been accused severally by different people of abandoning them and in truth, sometimes I’m really at fault. So please try not to take it too personally. Hang in there. There are people that really do cherish u and I’m sure u know I’m one of such. I’ll buzz u and we can continue this. Cheers dear