The JV Club

Erin Gibson

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The JV Club #28: Erin Gibson

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Bad home perms! “Flesh” colored tights! Platonic love affairs! Janet and awesome guest Erin Gibson (Throwing Shade) jaw a little about suburban Texas and a lot about women in comedy, the way girls learn to compete, and then wonder why everything has to be so… complicated.

8 comments

As a man and once a boy, I didn’t have anyone in my HS career whom I wanted to Be Like to that degree, even among my best friends, nor anyone who tried to become me, nor worked with me to become a third person together. But, then, I was the kind to highschooler who was flabbergasted (as I was reminded by the discussion in today’s episode) to learn that anyone jockeyed for position through whom they dated. Even gold-digging made vastly more sense than that to me.

Similar to the notion of beautiful v. handsome baby boys, I remember (while in HS) observing on the city bus a young father playing with his infant son, slightly roughing the baby boy up–briefly rubbing his face a little hard, things like that–and the infant was clearly puzzled as to why his parent was doing this, but since the father was beaming at him while “playing” thus, the infant smiled back while trying, very clearly, to figure out what the hell was going on. I could only take that as anecdotal evidence for environmental factors playing into the differences in how boys and girls were raised, since I strongly suspected (and still do) that would not be something the young father would do with an infant daughter.

The film HEAVENLY CREATURES, and the situation it was based on, comes to mind, both in the personalities merging notion as well as the notion of serious threat in junior high. I certainly was made aware of how quickly things could get Real even in my “elite” private high school when some friendly acquaintances were mocking one of the more Unusual of their senior classmates, and his response was to pull a knife and come after them…their response to this was run around behind me, and I was unaware of any of this till I looked back in the direction they were looking and saw this wild-eyed stranger to me advancing with a drawn knife. There are certain disadvantages to being one of the larger people around at a young age, and this could be one of them…not quite the same sort of awkwardness that Erin Gibson faced in being so tall so young, but perhaps not altogether incongruent.

Oh gosh, I have so much to say! I love love loved the feminism talk, and figuring things out. I spent so long just trying to navigate the different groups of feminists to figure out what I believed and how I could contribute. I tried to remember everything I wanted to say but I’m gonna have to listen again before coming back!

Thank you so much for giving us these episodes. I know for sure they are an amazing bright spot in my week.

One thing I feel I have to mention that you guys brought up at the end of the podcast, is that once you graduate high school, you then have the power to do/be what you want, and my immediate thought when that was said was that that might not be true today. I’m 19 and in college, and I feel like in many ways, these days at least, that sort of power and freedom isn’t something you can fully obtain until you’ve graduated college. A college degree has almost become a minimum requirement for a lot of jobs, and so it’s hard(though not impossible) to exert the true financial independence you may need to live that life, at least until you’ve graduated from college. In these ways, college has kind of become the new high school.

I’m sure you’ve already had a ton of people say this on Twitter or whatever, but I feel compelled to comment on the Girls thing you mentioned. I’ve actually just been catching up on Girls very recently, and the moment you mentioned is something that made me unsure too. Because in one way I totally agree that women shouldn’t dictate to other women how they ‘should’ act. But I felt like maybe the character took the principle to the extreme.

I guess with any kind of self-help type book, for me it comes down to the fact that women go looking for advice in them, or at the very least are just interested to hear a new approach. The fact that women are seeking out advice of their own accord and not having certain ideas or behaviours forced upon them makes me feel that they’re just as free to follow the advice in any book as other women are not to follow it. As much as I do agree that self-help books can turn into a bit of a never-ending cycle of ‘whose advice do I listen to?’ if you get carried away, I also think that they can really help people, and to make people feel like they’re somehow less of a feminist if they get something positive out of one of those books is an equally bad side of the same coin.

I guess the difference for me between a self help book and something like, for instance, politicians or religious leaders trying to dictate how women should act or feel, is that you have that choice about whether to follow them or not. But then I guess the key is that even when I’m searching for guidance, I still have enough of a sense of myself that I wouldn’t be ‘persuaded’ into following certain advice if I didn’t feel it resonated with me, and maybe some people don’t have that same sense of themselves and as a result can get caught up in ‘advice’ that doesn’t necessarily have a positive intention.

I think male friendships are very different but equally intense. There seems to be the dynamic of the responsible but maybe too cautious guy paired with the more reckless buddy. You see it in movies a lot, but its definitely there in real life.
While girls make seek out someone to imitate/emulate to feel more secure about themselves, boys make seek someone opposite to separate themselves from the pack.

Wow. SUCH great feedback on this episode. I LOVED your thoughts about Girls, self help books, and intense female friendships (and male ones!). How do I have the best and smartest listeners in all of pod-dom?

Hola!!I am (kinda) a new listener and I just listened to Erin’s podcast!Im sorry I am making you rewind a little bit in terms of podcast episodes.
First of all, I’d like to say that up until today I had never heard of Erin and I must say that I have learned that she is an incredible woman with amazing opinions and ideals!Let me preface all this by saying that most of the time I dont know about the incredible women that appear in this podcast so I’d like to thank Janet for introducing me to these great ladies, being Janet herself my greatest ‘discovery’!! Also, thank you Janetors (?) for you comments and opinions!You are all wise, indeed!
I have to admit that this podcast has amazed me and touched me very much.It is so far one of my favourite ones! …Plus.. great chemistry and rapport between JV and Erin!
Furthermore, I think that the main topics dealt with through the interview were very interesting, current and personal.I am certain that all of us (men and women) can relate to all them in one way or another! In terms of what Erin said about ‘girls not being taught how to be nice to each other’ I find that comment ‘spot on’ because, even though there are cultural differences between your culture and my Spanish culture, the common factor of female competitiveness is, unfortunately, always present!Apart from having competitive natures (which is greatin a healthy way!!) I think we ,women, are pretty much conditioned by media and the expectations media can create & impose. We live under constant pressure and we become ruthless judges of what is ‘right’ or ‘acceptable’. Nowadays, I work at an English college and I get to see, on a daily basis, how female students struggle with insecurities and it break my heart every time!Most of the time they blame (openly)their problems on their female classmates.I firmly believe women should stick together and help each other out!that is why I personally consider that this podcast epitomizes this positive attitudes..to a T!
Moreover, I woud like to add something about ‘platonic relationships’ and how mesmerized we can become at a certain age.I think that Erin’s ‘theory’ about only childen being a bit more prone to have these feelings towards same-sex kids is completely right.I am an only child and I did have those feelings too. I loved learning from these girls I admire so much.Thanks Janet for being so open and honest about your feeling for ‘your Erin’I think listeners really appreciate it when you talk about your personal experience.I really do!
Last but not least, in terms of ‘identity and gender issues’ I find Erin’s point of view and own experience fascinating!I could relate with her and her worries!I also very much appreciate your comments on feminism, racism and parental influence.
I apologize if I made any mistakes in my grammar/vocab and I hope you have been able to understand what I wanted to share with you and …I’m sorry it took me so long to express myself! Thanks your patience and attention.
mari(a)tron