I am a long distance caregiver. My mother lives in a continuing care community.She lives in Assisted Living. She has progressive dementia. The primary care Dr. referred her to a specialist who comes to the main building once a month. My mother refused to go to the appt. because she wanted to play bingo.

5 Answers

Couldn't the doctor walk down the hall to look at a rash in a visible location? If she still has a problem ask the staff to walk the doctor down there. Gee, let's hope she's not contagious or has something like MRSA.

the primary care dr. Referred her to a dermatologist because of a rash on her neck and arms. the dermatologist only comes to the facility once a month. TheStaff at AL said three different staff tried to get her to go to her appt. but she said there was nothing wrong with her -she could walk .

Have you considered why your mom doesn't want to go? Is it just dementia and she finds the game more amusing or does she wish to limit her medical care to palliative care?

How old is your mom? How is her general heath? Does she have medical issues that she doesn't wish to treat? Depending on a person's diagnosis and prognosis, they may not want to endure numerous or invasive medical procedures. Just some ideas to consider.

I just met with the Assisted Living facility's team last week and we discussed medical diagnostic and treatment options for those with dementia. Everyone is different, but it might be a good idea to do that and get the facility's approach to these matters. They can offer some good ideas.

You can't force your mom to see the Dr. regardless of where you live. You can be standing right beside her and not be able to get her to the Dr. if she doesn't want to go.

Have you asked the facility to help? Since they're an assisted living facility they may not provide that kind of assistance but it wouldn't hurt to ask. And if they say no you may have to rethink your mom's living arrangements. She may need more care than the AL can provide.

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