Tuesday, July 13, 2010

I don't know about you, but the last couple weeks-the lunar and solar eclipses-before, during and after-have been a hell of a ride. Lots of rapid filled waters to traverse and it wore me out; I am currently swimming in a calmer section of my river of life. This particular astrological event has focused in on the personal for all of us-worldwide, and those of us who had the eclipses hit one of our natal planets probably felt it more acutely than most.

I didn't really have a big hit, but the cardinal T-square has been immense for me, working on my shadow material, nudging me along, refocusing and healing, moving me into a deep personal shift in my consciousness.

Still not feeling really inspired art wise. I do have a show coming up in August, so I'm not totally out of touch.

Instead, I have been concentrating on meditations centered on my heart chakra, and reading up on the Italian renaissance.

I guess that communiction or the lack thereof has been a major focus for me of late. Trying to come to grips with control issues-my own and others. Ultimately, control trips are an illusion grounded in fear. Fear of loss, fear of lack, fear of death, well...fear of whatever it is that you fear. All one can do is recognize and own your own stuff and try to fix it.

I would council you to not be afraid of your dark shadow material, and...that you can't fix anyone else's crappage-that is theirs and there is nothing you can do to control them. Nothing...it is your own mind, tripping on your own issues; and pointing the finger at someone else does not resolve the mind trip you do not want to face within yourself.

It is not yours (judgment or wisdom) to tell someone else how to be or to try and control them, even though they are being a total shithead. One can only practice accepting that everyone is human and flawed-and take care that you don't take on someone else's stuff as your own; find contentment within your own walk of life. Keep working on fixing yourself. That is all you can do...and that is enough. Just remember that everyone has their point of view and theirs doesn't necessarily match your own. It is also about being okay with your vulnerability and loving yourself in all your flaws.

Here is a song which my guide sent me recently, from the musical Carousel-one of my old favorites.