Bedtime help

Bed time in our House is hell. We have two with SPD and I feel like we've tried everything and are just at a lost. It seems like it can take hours to get them to bed and because i have a chronic illness that causes me to be bedridden a lot of times we cave and just let them sleep wherever they want just so we can get some sleep. What do you all do for bedtimes? I feel like the worst mom in the world but since I got really sick it's made it worse and a lot of times my dh has to deal with it because I can't get upstairs physically to help. So what would you do and ideas on programs that might work?

If this doesn't make much sense sorry I took my meds and something they make me out of it. I appreciate any support or advice you have

Comments (5)

Bedtime is hell for us too. That's when ds's repetitive behaviors come out. He also has a LOT of trouble getting comfortable to sleep. Everything has to be just perfect. He also doesn't sttn. In the middle of the night he gets up and sleeps in our room on the floor. Sometimes (getting less and less often) he can not get comfortable in the middle of the night and cries, yells and screams in frustration. The other night he was up for 30 THIRTY minutes because he couldn't get his sippy (of water) comfortable in his hand. Really?!?!?!?! He wanted us to help him hold it just right. It's impossible to help and we don't want to reinforce it, but it's also very hard for him because he can't help it. I feel your pain, I really do.

My son is turning 6 this week. Bedtime has been a struggle for a long time. We go through periods of finding a routine, sticking with it and getting pretty good results and then BOOM! ...same routine, but back to bedtime battles.

Realize transitions are triggers, so give lots of lead up to bath time, then books and bed. However, now the mention of bath time starts the melt down.

I have to lay in his room until he falls asleep and he often wakes in the night and has fears. I find some comfort in hearing that others struggle with bedtime too. The Occupational Therapist that we see says that he has had a lot of parents ask about input/help/ideas for making bedtime easier and sadly, he says it is an area that is just now really being looked at by those "in the field".

We find routine works because then he knows the transitions are coming but even when the nighttime routine goes smoothly. From start to finish...bath, books, lights out and staying with him til he is asleep can take up to 2 hours. Exhausting and leaves no time for adults to wind down together because of early to rise schedules.

Read something recently that said some sensory kids are wound up by baths and some are soothed. So, tried changing bath to earlier time and cut out any dessert in the evening...special treats have to be earlier in the day. Sorry if this rambles on...I definitely relate to the feeling of being a crummy parent when I give in and stay in his room all night just so we can get some rest; but, then I think...well, if this is what he needs right now to feel safe and sleep, then maybe that's what I am suppose to do for him.

Every kid is different and even my significant other gets frustrated about the bedtime routine/battle even though well aware of the sensory issues.

My son with SPD is finally starting to STTN at nearly 3.5 years. I have to really wear him out during the day, skip the nap, and then a bath helps. He still has to have his comfort items and bedtime routine (fan on, nightlight, special blanket, etc.). But he rarely wakes up now. It used to be 1-3/times per night that he would awaken for various reasons.

I would try wearing them out (I know, easier said than done) by helping with chores and plain old running around outside when it's nice. Eating dinner earlier helps too. Then a light snack before bed so he doesn't wake up hungry.

Bedtime and trying to get them to sleep can be so rough...We have tried so many things! The biggest things I have noticed with DS is he need to get the right amount of input all throughout the day and not become riled up before bedtime with too much activity or electronic things. In addition to the normal sensory diet, here is what worked for us:

I make sure DS has time outside every morning for at least 30 minutes doing sensory activities to stimulate his melatonin production from the light outside and get some heavy work/vestibular things in.

My DS is a seeker, so the big thing that has also helped in addition to the sensory diet we were doing was giving him even MORE input with a sequence of (1) rotary input (spinnning him around about 20 times each direction in an office chair), (2) heavy work like pushing a big cardboard box or laundry basket back and forth, and (3) wilbarger brushing/calming tactile activity. We do this sequence at least 3x daily, in the morning, around lunchtime, and in the afternoon. I was doing a sensory diet before, but DS's needs were even higher than what I had imagined.

Before nightime, I have noticed if DS watches tv or is doing electronic things on the tablet (DH allows him these things, I don't) he seems to have a harder time going to sleep. (Dr. Andrew Weil has a lot of info in his books on melatonin production generally and how electonic items can disrupt our sleep).

After the normal bedtime routine, DS gets his "burrito wrap" of a blanket tightly wound around him, his weighted blanket on top, then I do a massage with an 8 lb medicine ball. The deep pressure helps him calm down to where he can actually stay in bed (DS does the same things as other people have mentioned where it seems like he is tossing and turning and just cannot get comfortable to settle down).

Hope some of these tips can help. It can seem like you are trying everthing and nothing works!