Sunday, August 31, 2008

At work, we have we have this pb pie. It is unbearably fantastic and I wish I would get one every shift I work, but - alas - I can only afford so much food and I try to put my limited income into the more necessary stuff like, you know, protein and vegetables (damn you, health). However, it's hard for me to keep from wanting to lick one whenever I have to compile the deliciousness for a table of mine.

"Oh, man, I'd kill for a slice of this right now."

Without fail, about 3 consecutive times now, the response to this has always been, "Ugh, do you have any idea how many calories are in that? Like, 1200, at least."

"Oh.. then, I should probably be eating about 3 of these a day. Thanks for pointing that out."

No one usually knows how to respond to that, which is even funnier. The weird thing is (besides the obvious fact that people need to raise my awareness to the caloric value every time I say I want to eat the pie, of course) is that two of those times weren't even women. It's sad, but I find that surprising.

Why do people think it's so important to put that out there, especially when you don't know who you're talking to? It drives me insane when people say things like that, knowing how they can effected. Maybe I'm over sensitive about things that people say because of what I've been through and seeing how words can destroy a person from the inside out. You can't expect everyone to know just what to say and what not to, but come on, that's just strange.

[Side note: no one comments on the caloric value of the pie when my (male) manager decides to throw a slice into the blender with 2 scoops of ice cream and a bit of whole milk? Of course not. ...Genius milkshake recipe, by the way.)

13 comments:

anon mom
said...

Calories have become common conversation, whether good, bad or insignificantly. It seems to be part of what grew out of the internet culture and (your) generation (no offense:) ... where people update their status for the world on a 24/7 basis. Everything is a fair topic for mixed company, the worldwide web, and anyone watching or listening. Because there is such a media glut (and by that, I mean words, pictures, sound, video, computers, phones, ipods, print mags and papers) ... because of its "disposability," I don't think people consider anymore whether something is appropriate, private, controversial, rude, sensitive, none of their business. They just say it in what is an ongoing stream of stuff. It's kinda too bad.

Just the other day I had a similar experience, I mentioned something about that new Vitamin Water, and my friend immediately exclaimed "you shouldn't drink that, it's loaded with calories!" Um? Technically I'm supposed to be having a milkshake with lunch every day, but I'll watch out for the scary water, thanks for the tip. I pointed out that those drinks have significantly less calories than cokes and other energy drinks, but that wasn't really the point. The point is that people assume it's ok to tell other people what they should/shouldn't be putting into their bodies.

I like your strategy of responding with how many slices of pie it would take to fill what you NEED in a day, I will have to use that next time! I think that in our society we don't ever have to think of a "need" for food, there's plenty of it everywhere, so views of it have evolved and it's now framed more as an enemy than a true physical requirement.

What people say is what they believe based on their own life experience. What a great opportunity you have a food server to make clear that your own thoughts will never be true for everyone. When we respond to what's true for us we have a chance to educate. The world can accept it or not but at least it’s out there. Most importantly, our confidence grows when we are able to express our needs out loud. It enforces what works for us. And isn’t it fun to see that perplexed look on someone’s face when they realize, “gee, I never thought of that”. Well said Ema.

Loved your reply! I hope you made them feel as uncomfy as they made you! ;)

Oh, and I noticed that you recommend Life Without Ed by Jenni Schaefer. She's a great person - I've met her on more than one occasion, the last being a few weeks ago when I was at my treatment alumni reunion. She works a lot with my old treatment center...

I don't understand how this (calories) is anything but personal business. So many people feel so comfortable interjecting about that topic whenever. It really upsets me- and men never get it. which upsets me more.

oh golly do I HATE comments like that. But good for you to respond in such a way! How strong of you! I remember once my calc teacher said that about something I was eating in front of the whole class...it was years before I touched it again.

ps - how'd you get that nifty widget that shows the blog labels? I have one but it links to outside my blog, and I want to keep readers IN my blog. I can't make the built-in blogger one work. how did you do it? thanks - Kyla

You are not being over sensitive.. at all! I seriously am hurt when people make remarks like that, especially when youre trying to make a step forward and they ignorantly splurt out "facts". I cannot tell you how many times people will make remarks about eating disorders about me to my face or just without thinking about a stranger walking by, its amazing how much it can affect us.

People always feel the need to comment on calories, weight, etc. It's annoying. However, the crazy, incredibly fat-filled milkshake sounds delish. It would take me a week to drink it though so I wouldn't freak out.