Homer: Look at all these knobs and buttons. They're clearly a superior race. Maybe that means they'll be nice to us.Lisa: You mean like Europeans were to the Native Americans or the Belgians were to The Congo?Homer: That's right, pick the only two times in history where things got messy.

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Homer: (Wearing glasses) The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side!Man: (From inside a bathroom stall.) That's a right triangle, you idiot!Homer: D'oh!