5 common misconceptions about mindfulness - busted

Written By The Good Housekeeping Web team | 1 March 2018

Get clued up about what mindfulness really means

Mindfulness and meditation are practices becoming increasingly popular, yet many of us are still a little mystified as to what they’re all about. Here, Sholto Radford, a researcher at the Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice at Bangor University, busts some common misconceptions...

Myth 1: Mindfulness is about banishing thoughts

“Mindfulness and mediation are about emptying the mind of thoughts. Many people I have talked to say that mindfulness and meditation are not for them, as they have either tried it and failed or think they are not capable of it. When I explore this with them it usually comes down to them believing that meditation is about not having any thoughts, and when they try this they very soon find it is an impossible task,” Radford explained.

“Mindfulness is not so much about getting rid of thoughts but relating to them differently; it is allowing them to come and go without getting caught up in them, while making more space for other aspects of our experience.”

Myth 2: Mindfulness is about positive thinking

“Mindfulness is not about trying to have positive thoughts, or even trying not to have negative thoughts. When people start practising they soon realise that they have little control over the thoughts that come to their mind,” explained Radford.

“Through mindfulness we can learn to relate differently to our thoughts, observing them with awareness, not taking them too seriously or feeling them to be always true.

“This relationship can help us untangle from our thoughts without judging them or trying to make them go away,” Radford added.

Myth 3: Mindfulness is just for New Agers and hippies

“Mindfulness now has a significant scientific evidence base and it is being used in numerous settings, including hospitals, schools, businesses, universities and prisons,” said Radford.

“With a growing interest, perhaps resulting from the stresses of modern life and the rigorous research on their benefits, mindfulness-based approaches seem to have transcended the label of alternative therapies.”

Myth 4: Mindfulness will make all my problems go away

“Difficulty and pain seem to be an inherent part of life, and no matter what we do we will experience difficulties, such as ill health, the loss of loved ones, or financial challenges.

“Mindfulness does not eliminate or fix all of our worldly problems, but it may help us relate differently to difficulties as they inevitably arise in our lives,” explained Radford.

“Unfortunately just reading books and understanding the concept of mindfulness will do very little other than give us something else to talk about. The cultivation of mindfulness is an experiential endeavour, it takes time and commitment to experience what it really has to offer and there are no quick fixes or magic wands,” Radford said.

Attitudes that support us in mindfulness

Want to get into the practice? Jon Kabat-Zinn, one of the pioneers in bringing mindfulness practice to the Western world, describes a number of attitudes that he sees as fundamental in supporting mindful awareness. These are:

Non-judgement
By noticing and letting go of judgement we allow ourselves to experience fully the moment as it actually is.

Patience
An attitude of patience helps us be with each moment as it arrives rather than trying to rush through certain moments that we consider to be less important in order to get to better ones.

Beginner’s mind
The attitude of beginner’s mind is one of curiosity towards our experience, trying to see things with fresh eyes as they really are in the moment rather than letting our beliefs, opinions and judgements shape our experience.

Trust
The practice of mindfulness is not about trying to become a ‘better’ person, or more like somebody else, but rather to become more fully who we already are. An attitude of trust in our own experience, intuition, goodness and wisdom supports us in this.

Non-striving
The practice of mindfulness is not goal-oriented, although at first this may seem counterintuitive. The process is not one of trying to achieve some other state or of changing ourselves, but of letting go of this struggle.

Acceptance
The attitude of acceptance is not a resignation but the ability to be with the reality of our experience in the moment, rather than getting caught up in the struggle, tension and mental effort of wanting things to be different, or denying how they are.

Letting go
We can expend a great deal of mental effort holding on to or attaching ourselves to things, whether these are our opinions, ideas, desires, situations or events, or people that we want or don’t want in our lives. Letting go involves recognising when the mind is gripping or tightening around these things and intentionally allowing ourselves to put them aside.