4 Awkward Issues That Come Up When Drafting A Will

Every family has its skeletons, but when you leave this earth,
the last thing you'll want to do is create more drama.

We spoke to AARP Bulletin columnist and personal finance expert
Jane Bryant Quinn to find out why it's so important to make a
will that won't disrupt family dynamics, or leave your children
bickering long after you're gone.

Here, we've highlighted the most difficult scenarios facing
parents today and some key factors to consider.

The successful child vs. the unsuccessful
child

All parents struggle with whether to leave their successful child
less money, especially if the other child wasn't as wealthy.
However, Quinn says "the whole focus should be how the family
will be after you die, and whether leaving unequal shares will
make everything easier."

If you choose to leave unequal shares, the wealthy child could
end up feeling penalized for doing well, while the struggling
sibling could feel slighted for not following in the other
child's footsteps.

What's more, there's always the chance one child's successful
business might go under, or that he or she may get a divorce or
illness and lose all their savings.

"You never know what will happen," says Quinn, so "it's better to
focus on the best outcome now."

Family dynamics

Some families see eye-to-eye on everything, while others can't
stand to be in the same room. If your family has any bad blood,
leaving an unbalanced will could drive an even deeper wedge
between them, says Quinn. Conversely, "a healthy family will
have a healthy result" and be able to talk through any jealousies
or slights.

The key thing to ask is "Can I help or can I hurt?" You can
definitely hurt by "sticking to" members you didn't care for, or
by leaving someone out of your will entirely. For children, a
disinheritance can leave a psychic wound they may never recover
from, leading to an all-out war.

Step-children and special needs

Not every situation calls for an even split. In fact, in some
cases where step-children are involved, the inheritance may have
already been determined in the divorce agreement. However,
step-children typically come under the equal shares rule if no
arrangements were made beforehand.

For children requiring lifetime care, Quinn says it's usually
best to leave that child more. Not only is this what the family
members would typically want, it makes it the process of
outlining care much easier when they money's already accounted
for.

Real estate issues

The case for a fair will cannot be overstated when it comes to
divvying up real estate, says Quinn. She recommends consulting
with the children to see how they feel about taking on a beach
house or condo, and if they're not up to it, then selling the
property and putting the proceeds toward other funds.