Monday, 24 February 2014

Show times: confused of Ibrahims & satay in Kajang; who will be MB Selangor Malaysia?

Lately, whether by design, fate or plain coincidence, we have
been seeing, reading or hearing about people or issues that involve the
name Ibrahim.

THERE is something odd going on lately in Malaysia. For some
seriously strange reasons, whether by design, fate or plain coincidence,
Malaysians are seeing, reading or hearing about people or issues that
involve the name Ibrahim. So let us go through the current hot list.

Anwar Ibrahim

He sure knows how to confuse us. We
all thought he wanted to be Prime Minister. Then he said he would retire
from politics and take up a teaching career if Pakatan Rakyat failed to
capture Putrajaya in the general election.

Well, many of us, being the confused lot that we are, actually
believe him, or at least believe in the many things that he has been
saying, anyway.

Then, following the decision of the Kajang state assemblyman to
vacate the seat, Anwar confused us further by saying he would not be
contesting the seat. But he finally announced, after much charade, that
he would be contesting after all.

Now, he says that even if he wins the seat, he does not aim to be
the Mentri Besar of Selangor. Well, the whole world seems to think
otherwise.

He has already confused us enough with his answers on why he is
forcing a by-election in Kajang. Until now, no one, including his
diehard supporters, can give us a convincing explanation.

Seriously, all of us should really ask him what it is he really
wants. This man has to be the master of surprises. No one can beat him
at that.

No one can remember him having a liking for football. Horses and jet
ski, yes. Suddenly he has donned the colours of the Selangor football
team.

If Penang plays against Selangor, we are not sure if he will be
wearing anything, given that he is an MP from Penang, which is also a
Pakatan-controlled state. That’s pretty confusing.

Well, for sure, he has really given us a few good lessons in politics!

Khalid Ibrahim

This is one sorry Ibrahim. His hair
has become more dishevelled lately. He murmurs to himself most of the
time and he is doing this even more.

Who can blame him? He has to be careful who he talks to now with his
party boss wanting to take over his job. His fellow ADUNs – who all
claim they are in politics for the sake of the people – must be having a
tough time deciding who they should stand behind now to further their
political ambitions.

They have to decide which horse they should back – this mumbling
corporate figure or the real political animal, Anwar Ibrahim, who has
the magic of getting people to believe what he wants them to believe.

If it’s me, it’s me. If he says it isn’t him, all will nod in
agreement, as if under a spell, and repeat that it isn’t him. It’s just a
lookalike of me, a body double, a Siamese twin.

Poor Khalid. The only one he can trust is himself. He can only talk to himself.

We all hope he will just hang in there because he is actually a
likeable bloke. What you see is what you get from this Ibrahim.

Zaid Ibrahim

Now, this one is tricky. We are just
as confused because he has either joined or formed almost every
political party in town. And we, being the terribly naïve Malaysians,
thought that this sort of thing only happens to Sabahan politicians.

No one is quite sure why he is declaring his candidacy for the
Kajang by-election. It can’t be his love for the satay there, for sure.
We are not even sure if he knows his way around Kajang or if he even has
friends there.

But this Ibrahim can be assured that he will get his 15 minutes of
fame every night on prime time TV. Our advice is he should not attempt
to sound too philosophical or intellectual during his campaign rounds in
Kajang.

That’s because we are already confused. We are not sure if he is
seeking the support of Barisan or Pakatan Rakyat supporters. We are not
too sure there are enough fence sitters like him. But we are sure he
will confuse us during the entire campaign period.

Ibrahim Ali

We can assume that he will be there.
He and his gang of merry men never let us down when it comes to
providing the comic relief. But he has been saying that he is actually
the one who has been delivering the Malay votes for Umno and that
without him, Umno would have been in serious trouble.

But the best line from him recently is that there are many troublemakers impersonating Perkasa members! Fuyoh!

Now, that’s interesting! And we, being the confused Malaysians,
thought that Malaysian politicians have confused us sufficiently and
endlessly but this is the ultimate confusion! Imitation Perkasa members,
wow.

Haris Ibrahim

He has been unusually quiet since
being initially denied entry into Australia last September. The
outspoken activist and lawyer shows up everywhere. He is a permanent
fixture in all protests and demonstra­tions. A specialist in this sort
of things, we may say. We are not sure if he will add some colour and
excitement in Kajang. But he’s definitely another Ibrahim that we can
welcome to the Kajang polls, to confuse many of us further.

Syed Ibrahim Syed Noh

He may not be a household
name in Malaysia but he would probably get a recognition from the
Malaysia Book of Records for being involved in the most number of
non-­government organisations. This Ibrahim is involved in every NGO –
from Bersih to Gabungan Mansuh ISA to Pemantau to Independent Monitoring
Election Commission.

He has served notice that he will be in Kajang in his capacity as
chief of the Malaysians for Free and Fair Elections (Mafrel). Are there
any hats he is not wearing? Hasn’t he been confused himself before?
We won’t be surprised if he will soon head a Gabungan Cinta Satay Kajang or Stick It Up for Kajang Voters movements.

Rahim Thamby Chik

Well, not quite Ibrahim but
close enough. This veteran politician can’t stand the sight of Anwar
Ibrahim. Or for that matter anything about Anwar Ibrahim. He is his
sworn enemy. Well, Enemy Forever. Not BFF, for sure.

We are not sure whether he will turn up in Kajang with Ummi Hafilda,
another sworn enemy of Anwar. She seems to have gone into political
oblivion since her marriage to a Pakistani doctor. It seems to be like
an extended honeymoon, perhaps to make up for lost time. But we hope to
hear from her soon. Looks like she has discovered that there’s more to
life than her obsession – Anwar Ibrahim. It’s never too late. All these
players hate one another but they can’t stay away from one another
either. Isn’t that confusing?

Ibrahim Ahmad Badawi

Brahim LSG Skychef Sdn Bhd,
formerly known as MAS Catering, belongs to Datuk Ibrahim Haji Ahmad
Badawi, the younger brother of Tun Abdullah Ahmad Badawi. This company
has been in the news lately.

Those of us who have been lucky enough to travel on business class
on MAS will find the airline’s satay simply irresistible. Having lost
the nasi lemak fight, we hope MAS will now redeem its image and go to Kajang for a satay war soon.

No one would have thought that there is such a thing as a “very naked” nasi lemak! Chef Wan Ismail took a picture of the very bare nasi lemak that was served in economy class on the route to Bangkok.

To the horror of this melodramatic chef, he claimed there were no nuts! Chef Wan may seem lembut (soft) at times but no one messes around with his food.

He was terribly pissed off. He whipped out his smart phone and took pictures of the nasi lemak missing the nuts. Err, sorry, I meant groundnuts.

And for Chef Wan, that’s a helluva of a telanjang (naked)! The essential ikan bilis or fried anchovies were not there either.

Well, following a full investigation, just short of a Royal
Commission, it was finally revealed that the nuts had to be removed
because they had gone stale. Blame the supplier who had gone on Chinese
New Year break. Well, someone has to be the scapegoat in the great
Malaysian tradition.

Poor Ibrahim, we never thought this would become an issue. This
whole thing may seem a little nutty but the moral of the lesson here is,
please don’t take economy class passengers for granted. We are not any ikan bilis, okay? We can strip anyone, Datuk or no Datuk, naked.

Well, things are going to get more interesting because the nomination and campaigning for Kajang have not even started yet!

And we still say the Election Commission should extend the campaigning period.

Contributed by Wong Chun Wai The views expressed are entirely the writer's own.Wong Chun Wai began his career as a journalist in Penang, and has
served The Star for over 27 years in various capacities and roles. He is
now the group's managing director/chief executive officer and formerly
the group chief editor. On The Beat made its debut on Feb 23
1997 and Chun Wai has penned the column weekly without a break, except
for the occasional press holiday when the paper was not published. In
May 2011, a compilation of selected articles of On The Beat was
published as a book and launched in conjunction with his 50th birthday.
Chun Wai also comments on current issues in The Star.

Quandary over who will be MB

Political drama: (clockwise from right) Khalid is refusing to resign even as Anwar campaigns in Kajang to be the next Mentri Besar; Rafizi has been unable to justify the Kajang Move while Azmin is in Mecca to perform the umrah.

Selangorians are
getting mixed signals. Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim is acting like he is the
next Mentri Besar of Selangor while MB Tan Sri Khalid Ibrahim is
behaving like he is here to stay.

TAN Sri Khalid Ibrahim has looked rather well groomed of late. The
Selangor Mentri Besar has been keeping his hair neatly combed and was
even seen sporting an Elvis-like pompadour on a few occasions.

Khalid can be rather moody when he is over-worked or if things are
not going well, and reporters covering him have learnt to use his hair
as a “mood meter”.

If his naturally wavy hair is nicely groomed, it means he is in a
good mood and everything is under control. But if his hair is all over
the place, it is best to keep the questions short and sweet and not try
to be funny with him.

But hair and “mood meter” aside, Khalid has been in an upbeat mood.

He has granted press interviews to one publication after another,
talking about a variety of issues from the state water situation to the
upcoming Kajang by-election.

It is evident that something big is looming on the water front.
Khalid has been dropping hints of a solution over the long-standing
water restructuring saga in Selangor.Earlier last week, he made
headlines when he said that if the water restructuring exercise were
successful, there could be free water not only in Selangor but also for
those residing in Kuala Lumpur and Putrajaya.

And all this was happening even as PKR de facto leader Datuk Seri
Anwar Ibrahim was busy positioning himself to be the next Mentri Besar
via the Kajang by-election.

Khalid’s demeanour and action over the last couple of weeks are not
that of a man who is preparing to bow out. All the signs are that Khalid
is here to stay and earlier last week, he confirmed that he is not
resigning as Mentri Besar while side-stepping questions of whether Anwar
will take over.

Khalid’s upbeat mood seems to be premised on two factors. The first
factor is the unequivocal support he is getting from PAS in Selangor and
the young Turks in the party’s Youth wing who have been critical of the
Kajang Move.

Selangor PAS is standing by him and in the event that he is pushed
out by his own party, PAS will nominate someone from their own party as
the Mentri Besar.

PAS president Datuk Seri Hadi Awang put it a little more
diplomatically: PAS will help Anwar win in Kajang, but the Mentri Besar
post will be discussed after the by-election.

A PAS politician in Selangor indicated that PAS will welcome Khalid
into the party if PKR decides to sack him. That is how far PAS in
Selangor is prepared to go for Khalid.

The second reason for Khalid’s buoyant mood is believed to have come
about after his weekly audience with the Sultan of Selangor two
Wednesdays ago. He got the assurance that the Palace will not interfere
in the political situation. The Palace will adhere strictly to its
constitutional role and will follow the letter of the law.

A huge load was lifted from his shoulders and he left the royal audience walking on air.

Neutrality on the part of the Palace is crucial to Khalid because he
is aware that Anwar and his backers have been trying to establish
communications with the Palace.

There was talk that they had attempted to get through to the Palace via a Selangor princess.

For instance, Pakatan Rakyat supporters were shocked when Anwar said
that former Mentri Besar Tan Sri Muhammad Muhammad Taib would be able
to advise him on the state’s rural development. They could not
understand why Pakatan wanted to be linked with Umno’s “Gold Coast
sensation” whom they used to mock as “me no speaking English”.

Mat Taib, as he is known, was briefly married to the Sultan’s
younger sister Tengku Zahariah and some claimed that Anwar’s advisors
were hoping to capitalise on that.

Unfortunately, Mat Taib has been persona non grata to the
Palace ever since the day he eloped with the Princess known as Ku Yah
and with whom he has a son who is now grown up with movie star looks to
boot.

About a week ago, the PKR newsletter Suara Keadilan
splashed a picture of Anwar alongside an uncle of the Sultan on its
front page. Inside was another photograph of Anwar seated at the same
dining table as Tengku Sulaiman Jalil Shah. The pair were guests at the
wedding reception of the son of a Terengganu-based PAS politician.

The Palace wasted no time in clearing the air. On Wednesday, the
Sultan’s private secretary Datuk Mohamad Munir Bani issued a statement
on behalf of Tuanku advising political parties and politicians not to
associate the Selangor Palace with their campaign in the Kajang
by-election.

The statement also advised members of the Selangor royalty against
being involved or allowing their name to be used by political parties in
the by-election.

It is understood that the Sultan’s uncle had never met Anwar until
the wedding event. Sources said he was seated at the VIP table when
Anwar appeared at his side and joined him. Suddenly, three photographers
appeared and started taking pictures of them.

It is learnt that Anwar’s group had also approached a family friend
of the Sultan but he told them that as a member of the Royal Selangor
Council, he couldn’t be associated with any political party.

The clumsy and amateurish attempts to get through to the Palace do not speak well of whoever is advising Anwar.

It is no secret that the Palace is comfortable with Khalid but,
basically, the Palace wants to keep a clear distance from the big time
politics taking place out there.

Several days ago, Rafizi Ramli, the man credited with the Kajang
Move, said that a party survey showed that only 17% of Kajang voters
were critical of the reason for the by-election compared to 25% who
approved of it.

He dismissed the critical group as mainly Barisan Nasional supporters.

“This means that only a small number of Kajang voters are against
the by-election,” Rafizi Ramli said at a press conference earlier last
week.

Of the remaining group, 21% wanted to know more before deciding, 26%
could not care less while 10% pleaded ignorance. Those who wished to
know more and those who did not care added up to 47% and they are the
undecided voters. It is an unusually big number of undecided voters for a
highly-urbanised seat but it also means that candidates have a good
chance to canvass for support.

Everyone tells Anwar he will win but he is not taking anything for
granted. He has kept a punishing schedule in Kajang. He tried his hand
at Chinese calligraphy at a Chinese new village dinner, he went to a
church where he received a standing ovation and he attended a futsal
game to touch base with the youth. By polling day, he would have covered
every housing estate at least twice over.

The Penang born and bred Anwar wants to present himself as somebody who cares for Selangor.

In fact, he had kicked off his campaign by attending a Selangor
Football Association event wearing the yellow and red jersey of the
state. A witty commentator labelled him “pemain import baru (latest imported player)” for Selangor.

The internal dynamics in PKR has almost eclipsed the by-election as
well as the other candidates in the race, namely Barisan’s Datin Paduka
Chew Mei Fun and independent Datuk Zaid Ibrahim.

The tight and loyal circle around Khalid claimed that their boss has
the numbers to survive. Rafizi, on his part, has said that the Mentri
Besar issue will not be put to the vote in the State Legislative
Assembly.

“Khalid knows that no one can really do anything if he refuses to resign,” said a political insider.
Rafizi has been talking about an Umno plot to topple Datuk Seri
Najib Tun Razak but the real plot is within PKR to topple Khalid.

The Anwar for MB camp had been bending over backwards for Khalid
because they needed him to go without making a scene. They even gave in
to his demand to be made the director of election over the party’s
deputy president Azmin Ali.

By-elections are normally led by the deputy president of a party and
Azmin, who is also the Selangor chief, is a seasoned organiser with a
good grasp of the Selangor ground. But he was pressured to back off for
Khalid. Azmin has since left for Mecca to perform the umrah.

It is evident by now that Khalid is not interested in any move by
Anwar’s advisors to have him sign a post-dated letter of resignation.
That was the original plan for a smooth transition.

Khalid was supposed to resign effective March 23 and Anwar, fresh
from victory, would be nominated and sworn in as the new Mentri Besar.
In hindsight, it was wishful thinking on their part and yet more proof
of the lack of experience among Anwar’s advisors.

Anwar is now trapped in a situation where the man he is trying to
dislodge refuses to go and is in charge of his election campaign.

There is no denying it – the Kajang Move has become a hot mess.

Some are expecting the Pakatan Rakyat convention on March 8 to
involve some kind of call for Anwar to lead in Selangor. It will be
tricky but who would object if it is presented as the road to Putrajaya?

The Anwar side sees Anwar, with his charisma and oratory skills, as the catalyst for the Putrajaya dream.

But the Khalid side says that the best advertisement for the Putrajaya dream is the Selangor model under Khalid’s leadership.

In the meantime, they have to tackle the road to Kajang.

Contributed by Joceline Tan> Joceline Tan can be reached at joceline@thestar.com.my