Things You Wish You Knew Already-First Relationship

1. Find a balance. There’s a well-known joke of when people get into a relationship, they suddenly become dead to their family and friends. Literally, they disappear off of the face of the planet.

Everyone knows they’re with their new girl/boyfriend, but it shouldn’t be like this. Your relationship quickly fizzles out if you don’t find a proper balance between your partner and your friends and family.

2. You probably won’t end up with this person. Yeah, I know, you thought you were going to marry them. Listen, I’m not saying you won’t marry them, but you probably won’t marry them. But that doesn’t mean your relationship shouldn’t be taken seriously. Put yourself in the relationship, enjoy every moment of it, and just see where it goes.

3. You don’t own them. I thought I owned my boyfriend, I thought he was mine, and I was all his. But things don’t work that way and nor should they. You have to accept that your partner has their own personal lives: friends, family and hobbies. This doesn’t mean you must be around them every waking minute, they deserve their own personal time away from you and so do you.

4. Don’t try to change them. Listen, you may not like certain things about them, but this doesn’t mean you change them. I attempted to get my boyfriend into college, and he dropped out after a couple months. He didn’t want to go, and I tried to change his mind. But the point is, you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change.

5. Don’t rush. You may not have had sex yet and you know what, that’s okay. I waited a couple months before having sex with my first boyfriend, and it did the relationship a lot of good.

We became friends first and spent quality time together outside of the bedroom. So, you don’t have to sleep with them right away, do what feels right for you.

6. Don’t argue over text. You can text to communicate with your partner over simple things such as when they are coming over or if they want you to bring pizza to their place. But never have your arguments over text message. Anything you feel that you should talk about, always do it in person. Texting will only make it worse.

7. Don’t change yourself. Be who you are, not what you think your partner would like. They like you for a reason, don’t change yourself. If you have a set of opinions and values, you shouldn’t change them in order to be with someone. Yes, you can compromise, but the core of you should always stay the same.

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