Today, I hit a parked car which was sticking out in the road and practically unavoidable. I left a note on the windshield saying, "You deserved to get hit - you park like an asshole." Later I realized that the paper I tore to write on was the back of my bank statement, name and address included. FML

Why would you actually admit that you have nothing to say? I'll give you a suggestion - if you have nothing to say, DON'T SAY ANYTHING. Don't feel like you have to reply to #1 just to get your worthless, empty comment near the top. No one is impressed, I promise you.

You are correct, no one asked me. And no one needed to ask me. The Mighty FML Deity created the comment section so that people can speak their minds. You tried to speak yours and failed like the Titanic, Betamax, and Lehman Brothers. So I spoke mine.
Questions?

Dude totally deserved it for parking like an ass hole...seriously, take an extra couple seconds to fix your parking because other people have to park and / or drive by...the car may very well have been unavoidable...I would have done the same thing...I just wouldnt have been dumb enough to use my bank statement with my info on it.

My mom lives on an awkward one way street, and her house is on the corner of a 90 degree angle...basically the road does a complete 90 turn to the left, and if you keep going straight rather than turn you are in her driveway. Many people park on the street, and you have to park on one side 4 days of the week and the other side of the road the other 3 days. During the few days that people park on the right side of the road...some people park up way too far (still on the street) and it partially blocks the drive way, making getting in and out extremely difficult sometimes...forcing us (myself, my mom, her landlord, etc...) to sometimes maneuver awkwardly to get out of the driveway. Those people should have enough common sense not to park that far up and partially block a driveway like that...they parked like an ass hole. While I have never hit a car going in and out, I have left notes on their car telling them they parked like an ass hole and that people have to get in and out of the driveway they are blocking. So ok, maybe OP could have braked sooner, or payed more attention...but you dont know what the road was like, or how much room there was, or just how badly the ass hole was parked. People who park like ass holes on streets like that deserve to have their cars hit (not saying on purpose). And people who are ass holes...should be told that they are ass holes when they act like one.

Side note...I agree OP was most likely driving too fast and / or probably not paying attention, and for that they deserve to pay for their shitty driving...my point is that you dont know exactly what the road was like, how much room there was or how badly the dude was parked, so it really could have been almost unavoidable...really my biggest point is people shouldnt park like ass holes, it takes seconds to fix how you are parked, and people who park like ass holes deserve to have their cars hit because they are an ass hole. But OP should have taken responsibility if he was truly at fault.

Seeing how the parked car is stationary, I'm pretty sure you could have avoided it by... you know... not crashing into it. Then you proceed with a hit-and-run, leaving a hateful note blaming the other person for your own stupidity. I hope they use your personal information to call the cops and get you arrested, like you deserve.

You dont know what the road was like, how much room where was to get by, maybe it was a parking lot? Point is there are a lot of roads and parking lots and such that are very awkward, much less when you have someone parked like an ass hole.

Do you run into trees as well and say it's the tree's fault, because it was planted weird? And then leave notes saying, "nice job growing out oddly, stupid plant" that have your social security number on the back?