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Mini- Review: 50 Shades of Grey

I know, I know. The moment you read the title you thought, “really rata, you read that book”. Yes I did. sort of. I heard the book via Audible, which is by the way pretty freaking amazing if you have hours to listen. All 200 hours haha. I am an auditory learner so for me listening in on a story works out. I would highly recommend Audible app for reading on the go.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. I found a review that pretty much sums up my feelings for the book. Please check it out the link at the top! After reading both the book and blog you will notice all of the points the blogger wrote were dead on accurate! (definition of sub conscious anyone?) I didn’t exactly HATE it, but I am a bit disappointed with the characters, Ok one character in particular.

This book I think was a gateway book for women to get their groove back, which trust me I don’t need to get my groove back but when you hear so much about a book or movie or show, it peaks your interest and you have to at some point give in. I gave in when I discovered I could get the book for free with Audible. So I said, Eff it lets read it.

First thing, I cannot stand the extreme naivety of the main character, Anastasia. She is damn near a college graduate but yet we discover she has never gotten drunk (hard to believe as she was away at college), did not ever kiss a person, did not utilize email or even have a laptop of her own! The book is set in 2011, um who doesn’t have a laptop, netbook, some old dinosaur of a desktop, something! Her comments throughout the book also categorize her more of a teenager, “oh my” (who says that anymore?) “double crap”, “holy moses”, it might has well should have been titled 50 shades of “oh my”. Seriously, it upset me to think that this young, accomplished woman who be so shy, insecure, and overall unaware. Also, this girl blushes at EVERYTHING. Maybe it should have been called 50 Shades of Anastasia’s Blushing Face. I get it, she is the role of the young beautiful shy and naive protagonist, but her character is so “dumbed down” that its almost unbearable. Also another thing I think is odd is her relationship to food. Part of it is story line that plays into Christians past but also is just plain weird. She doesn’t eat like ever only when she is forced to but when she does, its the best thing she has ever had….she also gets so caught up with her emotions she forgets she has a stomach. As a big girl that’s hard for me to accept!

The other main character is Christian Grey, a handsome filthy freaking rich guy who is pretty kinky. He doesn’t piss me off as much as Ana does but he has his own character flaws. He claims that he isn’t a romantic and that he is just there for the whips and chains and thrills, but honestly he contradicts himself . I have to agree and reiterate the point made in the Dear Author blog that he is unethical.

The mind games really set the scene for when Christian takes Ana to Seattle where he has her sign a Non-Disclosure Agreement prior to revealing the fact that he’s a dom. There is so much wrong with this I don’t know where to begin. First, Anastasia has no effing clue what BDSM is. Second, she has no sexual experience. Third, the agreement says she can’t talk about this to anyone, which means that she cannot ask anyone bedsides Christian anything about BDSM. Thus, Christian gets to be the one who controls the interpretation of what it means to be a submissive. Does that not strike anyone else as abusive? This is such a violation of kink ethics, of ethics period.

He states he isn’t into romance but proceeds to call her “baby”, and states he is “beguiled” by her. REALLY?!? To me, its like a love story on crack. Two people who are on supposedly opposite ends of the spectrum (financially, maturity, sexually) yet are so drawn into each other and are willing to compromise their “true selves”. I know this is just a story but it’s so hyper exaggerated it starts making the reader mad. Or at least it made me mad.

What also made me mad is that it took freaking a million chapters to get to the action! I knew what I was getting into when I downloaded it, so what the hell?

True to Ruby fashion, I aim to finish this book and the series. I don’t know if I will like what I read from here but oh well, at least I can say I read it. Now lets talk about some good stuff: Who should play these characters if a movie were to arise from this? (p.s. this is already in the works).

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One thought on “Mini- Review: 50 Shades of Grey”

I loved reading this post! hilarious! I have been wanting to write a review on the fifty shades trilogy but I still cant think how to word it. but I fully agree with you. every time Ana said “oh my!” I twitched… cant wait for more reviews from you. thanks.