Thursday, June 22, 2017

Each weekday afternoon, I head north on the Palisades
Parkway, on my way to Mesivta Ohr Naftali in New Windsor, NY. As the Yeshiva’s
Principal, you can only imagine how devastated the talmidim are if I am not
there early enough to send them to class on time.

The Palisades Parkway ends next to the beautiful Bear
Mountain Bridge. At that point, I continue north on Route 9W. After a short
drive, the highway ascends precipitously, affording a magnificent and
breathtaking view. From the summit, one can see for miles. It is impossible not
to be overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of the panorama.

The first few times I drove up, I stopped to marvel at the stunning
view. But with time I no longer stopped, although I was still excited by the
view. Within a few more weeks, I hardly thought about it at all. Sadly, that is
the way we are. What was once novel and exciting quickly becomes trite and
commonplace.

It is only when I am driving a passenger who is unfamiliar
with the area, that I again feel a tinge of excitement for the magnificent view.
When someone else sees it for the first time and begins to marvel about it,
that initial excitement that I once felt, is aroused within me, and I again
sense how extraordinary it is.

For the last couple of years, I have had the privilege of
being the Dinner Chairman at the dinner of Yeshiva of Spring Valley, our sons’
elementary school. Being Chairman includes introducing the Guests of Honor.
This year, I was not previously familiar with the Guests of Honor, but wanted
to introduce them affording them the honor they deserved. Well before the
dinner, I spoke with some of their friends, family members, and employees. But
more significantly, I called the honorees themselves, first the husband and
then the wife, and asked each to describe the virtues of their spouse in sixty
seconds or less.

I was deeply impressed and moved by both of their responses. Sixty
seconds is not a lot of time to relate the uniqueness[DS1] of a person, all the more so a spouse. But if you’re forced
to try to sum up the greatness of your spouse within that time, it forces you
to concretize your reflections about their golden qualities.

I realized afterwards that it’s a great shalom bayis exercise.
How often do spouses think about the uniqueness of the person they married? How
often do they remind themselves of the things that once excited them about
their partner in life? It’s vital, for those, who, on a daily basis, contend
with annoyances and idiosyncrasies of their spouse.

It’s an idea that is helpful with all those other things
which are so precious, but we often fail to appreciate. A friend related that
before he goes to sleep every night, he looks at the faces of each of his
sleeping children and thinks about how much he loves them, and thanks Hashem
for each one. He admitted that when his children are awake, there are days and
situations when it can be challenging to fully appreciate all his children. But
that’s all the more reason why he makes sure to think about them in a positive
manner every night.

Rav Noach Weinberg zt’l noted that complacency is the enemy
of growth. When people become fixated with their ideas, life becomes stable and
people can become weary and grumpy.

Our nature is to take things for granted. The only way to
combat that nature, is to actively reflect upon what makes those things special
and dear to us. One can recapture enthusiasm by reminding himself his original
emotions for everything he has.

If one is able to recite “Modeh Ani” in his waking moment
each morning, with some level of attention, he will set the tone for beginning
his day with gratitude.

If we are able to reflect upon the simple gifts of life, we
will remember that those simple gifts aren’t simple at all.