Endorsements and Warnings From a Fad Enthusiast

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Are you looking to try a fitness trend that requires minimal effort, zero dollars, and is virtually slower than walking? Then do I have the fad for you! It’s called Gojjing (no it’s not) and it’s literally just jogging backwards. That’s it.

Gojjing (not what it’s called at all) is supposed to treat your body with the gentle touch it deserves from a rigorous fitness routine. It’s easy on the joints and tough on the glutes. What the fans don’t tell you about Gojjing (is literally everything because the word Gojjing is ungoogle-able) is that it’s mainly for those impermeable to gawking stares and pot-holes.

The first (and last) time I saw the term Gojjing was in an article in The Sydney Morning Herald (I will not apologize for being so worldly) called “The Six Weirdest Fitness Trends of 2014”. I tried googling the word, excited about doing something so silly for no money (usually I pay top dollar to humiliate myself) and couldn’t find a damn thing!

But the gods wouldn’t let such a good trend go untried by a faddist like myself, and soon enough I stumbled upon a new fitness trend mainly in the UK called Retro Running or Reverse Running. Honestly, most people are just calling it “running backwards” but I am not going to let an incredible term like Gojjing go unused in this society! This article is for you, Australia. You’re welcome.

Gojjing (every time I type it I feel like a revolutionary!) sprang onto the scene out of nowhere in 2006. It has peaked in the public’s eye over the last year on the heels (feet joke. runners get it.) of Barefoot Running. From what I gather through my research, people thought, “I know that Barefoot Running is super weird and painful, but how can we really maximize the emotional and physical risks of running?!” and then one genius Australian yelled “GOJJING IS THE ANSWER!” and everybody laughed because Gojjing is a hilarious word and Australian accents are fun.

The benefits of Gojjing are touted to be a more complete workout, a gentler exercise, and a good story for your friends. If you want to read some more documentation on Gojjing, might I recommend its bustling Wikipedia page, which describes the fad with the following gem of a sentence: “the act of running in reverse, so that one travels in the direction one’s back is facing rather than one’s front.”

Gojjing is here to stay, dummies, so put on your knee pads and get on board.