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Author
Topic: At My Wits End - Any Similar Experiences??? (Read 5861 times)

The moderators on this board will probably kick me off, but I figure if I ask this question on the Off Topic forum they can't get too mad. I am one of those people who has tested negative so far but have had tremendous issues with illness/symptoms after a sexual encounter of a very risky nature that have literally brought me down very low. I just want to ask a few questions:

Here is my story first: I am gay and 40 years old but have been very unactive sexually all my life. I had a very stupid sexual encounter early in February of this year and got sick two weeks later. This was very dangerous receptive encounter unprotected. It all started with a hot/feverish feeling in my ears, then my neck and head but did not have a measureable fever. I know these were purely physicial symptoms because I was not crazy/stressed in the two weeks between the stupid encounter and the feverish feeling because I thought the person I was with was completely negative. This feverish head and neck remain to this day all day everyday although they have diminished a lot.

I also got very swollen glands in the neck, arm and groin about a week later which lasted for almost 5 months. They were the most swollen in the neck. About three months after the encounter I had a classic flu-like illness with fever, chills. Had to stay in bed for about a week. Since then I have been very tired and pale looking (close friends regularly say "what is up with you", "you look horrible", and "you look like you've aged 20 years", all of which are very accurate). I feel like I am anemic (pale, tired, listless, etc.) and have had a lot of minor skin issues which are really troubling (slow to heal sores, red spots on trunk, etc.)

Anyway, why I am posting this is I am curious if anyone had an HIV encounter/symptoms remotely like this where they got sick in a few week with a feverish illness and stayed ill-feeling for several months afterwards before testing positive? I have tested negative for all STDS but I am at my wits end to understand what has happened to me. Any ideas related to HIV or not would be welcome. The doctor has no clue and said to take B vitamins...

I am posting this here because the moderators on the Am I Infected forum don't like folks like me who have an unexplained illness after a sexual encounter to post there....

This is an off-topic post in terms of HIV in the eyes of the moderators on this board since I have been told by a few of the moderators that HIV is not an issue in my case. That is why I am asking it on an off-topic forum. Are you saying that I can't post an off-topic post in an off-topic forum? That does not make sense....

Regardless of why you're posting this here, in your original post in the "Am I Infected" forum the answer you got from two people was:

Quote

If you are feeling really sick (and to be honest, your assessment does not seem to fit that category) then you have to go see a doctor to find out what's wrong. Certainly the internet can offer no diagnosis nor treatment.

Again, I would ask, what makes you think the answer will be different in this forum?

and you have been told that this forum specifically is for off-topic banter and socialization.

It is not a forum for you to continue you fears or hiv.

And since this is not a general std forum. you should ask your questions in the 'am i infected' forum which you will be told to consult your doctor if sysmptoms of something persist.

Do not bring your shit here to this light banter forum.

We do not and will not hear it here.

If you want to talk about politics or the golden girls or something like that, this is the forum and you are welcome to do so. If you persist in questioning your hiv status or any other ailment, then get the fark out of this forum.

This forum is not a consolation prize for you since you are hiv negative conclusively.

If you need or want further direction, ask you questions back in your same thread in the 'am i infected' forum.

You have rightly informed the original poster that his topic was inappropiate in this section.Next you rightly (again!) reported this incident to the moderators.The next 3rd appropriate action would have been to use the designated ignore button, or better; refrain from further engaging the original poster.Instead you chose to turn from defensive to offensive.Most regretable and totally uncalled for.

Agree with Grasshopper. It's a moderators' issue, not an opportunity for yelling. Yep, flagrant misuse of forum space; but is it really necessary to tell a person who's sick (in his head anyway, of whatever cause, and certainly sick with obsessive worry) that he "disguts" you and that he is an "ass" and he's bringing "shit"?

Jay

Logged

Her finely-touched spirit had still its fine issues, though they were not widely visible. Her full nature, like that river of which Cyrus broke the strength, spent itself in channels which had no great name on the earth. But the effect of her being on those around her was incalculably diffusive: for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.

The moderators do NOT consider your topic to be "Off Topic". You are refusing to believe your negative results, pure and simple.

I'm moving this thread to the Am I forum where it belongs and I am also locking this so you can return to your original thread

And speaking of original post, that is where I want you to keep all your additional thoughts or questions. You are NOT in any position to be giving advice in this forum as you obviously do not have a good grasp on the basics of hiv transmission and testing.

But I'm hoping you will not be posting in your original thread because as you might know from reading the Welcome Thread:

Quote

Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusive negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to a four week Time Out (a temporary ban from the Forums). The purpose of a Time Out is to encourage you to seek the face-to-face help we cannot provide on this forum.

Please consider yourself warned.

You do not have hiv and it's time you went to a doctor to get to the bottom of your physical problems. If you still cannot accept your negative hiv results, they perhaps a visit to a menatl health care professional is in order.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

First of all, you have allowed your anxiety to take over by inserting your concerns in any other area of the Forums than this one. You have no business doing that and it must no happen again.

Secondly, you have more than reliably tested negative for HIV. Simply because you continue to have undiagnosed symptoms does not by default invalidate your negative results. Along with working with whomever you need to see in the medical field, I agree with Ann that it's time for you to see a therapist or other like professional to get some support with sorting out your feelings during a difficult time.

This is not an HIV situation no matter what your mind is telling you otherwise. Period.

The only one in serious danger of being banned is you. You have REPEATEDLY been asked -- in numerous threads and PMs in the past -- to keep your snide and unnecessarily hostile comments to yourself. If you really think responses such as this make you look like a defender of the Forums' integrity, you've really got another thing coming.