With honesty, compassion and a large measure of wit and wisdom, 83-year-old author Rubin (Intimate Strangers , Just Friends , etc.) describes in full the world of the elderly in America, where social circles diminish as friends die, sexual desire and ability fade, and the wish to â€œdie with dignityâ€ conflicts with the â€œoften vain hope of putting off our meeting with it just a little longer.â€ Rubin, a psychotherapist for 35 years, has gathered numerous interviews with seniors and combined them with her own reflections to illustrate clearly the difficult questions today's seniors face, both in the day-to-day and the long run. Straightforward, revealing and thought-provoking, this book makes a fine, thorough primer for middle-aged adults preparing for â€œthis business of getting oldâ€ in â€œa society that sees old age as repugnant at the same time that it... dream[s] of extending life still furtherâ€; however, it's best avoided by anyone who wants to keep believing that â€œif you eat right, sleep right, exercise your body and your brain right, you'll never get really old.â€ The elderly will find much to nod along with, and a handy tool for getting their point across to middle-aged children whose fearful attitudes toward aging can keep an otherwise normal sense of understanding at bay. (Sept.)