Kelly Cutrone: Best Power Bitch Boss Eva!

Dear Kelly Cutrone, Will you hire me? Will you pluck me out of obscurity and teach me how to be a “Power Bitch” and also find me a male model Columbia-educated boyfriend? I have no life whatsoever and can work all day, every day. Thanks! xx

On last night’s episode of The Hills,Whitney arrived in New York City and quickly became immersed in shirtless male models. Like a border collie herding sheep, Kelly Cutrone expertly isolated one fine-looking specimen, ordering the lad to appear at “8:45 sharp” for drinks at the SoHo Grand. “This is multi-tasking in the Power Bitch world,” Kelly explained to a flustered Whitney. Then Kelly didn’t show up so that Whitney would be left alone with the guy—What a boss!

The rest of the show sucked. LC and the She-Pratt had a rousing debate about hamsters v. guinea pigs and Doug got dumped. To add insult to injury, LC called him “Dougie” as she awkwardly delivered the news that he was “way too nice” for her. Yeesh.

Oh and another thing: If you’re a glutton for punishment (like me), tune in Sunday at 7:30 p.m. for a new episode of The Hills. This one looks promising: Brody gets arrested—hopefully by the fashion police for sporting the ugly camo T-shirt he wore last night.