I’m not sure if I can say things are back to normal after the holidays, but we’re gettin there. I had Mimosa Day today, although somewhat delayed by two hours, thank you, Snowfall. As a family, we cleared the snow. It’s some of that powdery, light and fluffy snow. We had quite a good time, despite the below freezing temps.

All this is made much more enjoyable by having a working furnace, which we do, after four days of no heat.
Our previous HVAC guy turned out to be a real dickhead. He’d come, make the furnace go, we’d pay him, he’d leave, it would stop, we’d call him, he’d come, make the furnace go, we’d pay him, he’d leave, it would stop. The last time I called him, he seemed awfully put out at the idea that he’d need to come out again. The Mister grew indignant about paying for results that didn’t last, and eventually HVAC Dickhead told The Mister to call someone else.

That is not a great business model, by the way.

these two seem professional and competent in comparison…

As a result, we have become far more knowledgeable about furnace operation than any two average people need to be. This is the third house we’ve owned and we were previously unaccustomed to anything other than changing the furnace filters.

Every few days, weeks, or months, we’d be in the ugly laundry room, unscrewing the panels, removing any dust, checking the flashing code, cleaning the flame sensor. Resetting the power at the fuse box and turning off our beeping alarm system always made for a good time, especially when doing it five or six times in an hour. We’d hope and pray and shout at the furnace, and sometimes it would light and stay lit, and sometimes it would light and go out, and sometimes it didn’t light at all.

Since it requires frequent adoration and prayer, I’ve concluded that our four-year-old furnace fancies itself as a sort of demi-god of fire.

Eventually, it’s 53F in your house and you ask around for a new HVAC guy, because you never, ever wanted to be the mistress of the furnace, and while you look great in hats, you don’t much enjoy wearing them around the clock and you despise using screwdrivers.

I may have begun the relationship with New HVAC Guy as a pedantic, defensive, demanding bitch. These are my natural gifts, and although I try to only share them with people who piss me off, sometimes I need people to know, from the get-go, that I am not as nice as my face and my voice make me seem.

don’t care

“I don’t give a cat’s crap if you can make the furnace run. We can make the furnace run. I need you to find out why it doesn’t keep running, and then fix that so that it always runs. FOREVERRR.”

Parts places aren’t open on the weekend.
We bought some space heaters and worshiped them.
Yes, I would still rather be too cold than too hot.

Eventually, a new circuit board became available, New HVAC Guy fixed the furnace, and a few hours later, our feet thawed, we hung up our outerwear, and went on with our lives.

I tell you, going on with your life is a sorely underrated joy.

desire to harness the power of fire is primitive.

If you are in Indianapolis and need a good reference on an HVAC guy, let me know. I’ll tell you who we use and who we shame.

21 Responses to New Year, New HVAC Guy

I have been a DirectTV customer for 14 years. I have no complaints other than how I don’t enjoy paying the bill 😉

BUT, we have Cuntcast for internet, and if you go back to September 2013, you can read all about our battle against their monopoly and attempts at enslavement.
I did just negotiate a reduced rate, though, because I am not their bitch.

Oh good, another laugh-till-I-cry post. I totally get the fucking powerlessness that can be felt when service people (not meant at all derogatorily except when they are dickheads) aren’t reliable. Having lived in the Midwest for twelve years, I experienced the flood side of bad service people. The person who initially installed my drain tile system, and plumbing did a piss poor job, and then disappeared. After 12 floods in 100 year storms, I finally tore out my finished basement, redid the drain tile, installed an overhead sewer (no one in western NY knows what that is) and the flood problems on the inside of my house were over. Outside was another story. I got feet of water in my backyard which the town told me couldn’t be graded ’cause then the water would go somewhere else. I can tell you I was a major bitch in response to that comment. But, I digress. The point is, it is very stressful, both physically and mentally when something as basic as heat becomes unreliable along with your fixer. Glad you made it through, and fervent wishes you never again suffer heatlessness or bad service people.

Love,
elizabeth

PS: It’s amazing how quickly that appreciation of normal life dissipates until the next crisis. I am grateful for the reminder as I believe in jinxes.

In terms of jinxes, I sincerely suspect that the furnace failure was a direct result of The Mister’s promotion, lol!
It’s certainly not for lack of gratitude when the furnace worked, as I was always sure to count that one in my blessings, especially since last winter was an on again off again furnace situation!
I’m sorry about the flooding. Our old house was flooded in 2003. Just the furnished basement that we and the babies SLEPT IN. What a pain that was! The sump pump was no match for the city’s clogged sewers!
Like you, I value repairmen, but honestly, who keeps a business going when they turn away customers who clearly need service? At least I have the satisfaction of knowing that the larger expense didn’t go into HVAC Dickhead’s pocket!

Seems we had approximately the same idea on what to post today. 😛 I detest bad business practices, Digital anything sucks donkey balls when it doesn’t work, rude people should have to suck the aforementioned donkey parts, and I have a lovely bean bag that heats up in the microwave that assures me I’ll never have to go to bed with cold feet again.
Who needs a man when you’ve got a bean bag and/or donkey balls? Competent men, however, don’t apply to this theory…

Mercury in retrograde is what I hear from my crystal ball blogging buddies. Mischief and mayhem afoot until mid February. Now that you have heat, I suggest you adopt my plan for riding out the planetary retrograde: comfy pj’s (all day), dark chocolate in all forms and sizes (all meals & snacks) and newly added mimosas. Mahalo. Or shalom. Or bottoms up.

I love the stories you tell that have me laughing and end with me feeling a little bit bad because I was laughing at a woman in distress, like slowly freezing to death in her own house. Sorry, but it’s good that you can laugh about it. If you’re not laughing, it’s good that I can. The major digitally-controlled expense we have is the washer that was supposed to be smarter than Einstein. So many people shared horror stories about $900 control board repairs (on a $1,200 washer) that we bought and maintained a service contract for all these many years. To-date, no repairs required. I guess they don’t care how they get their $900. Great post – stay warm.

Oh Dan. You know I blogged about Fairy Godmother’s digital washer atrocity…It scared me so badly, I thought, “How bad can washboards be?” But then there were kids and babies…lol!
You’re always supposed to laugh at my suffering here, otherwise I wouldn’t write the tales of woe!
I am warm, thank you 🙂

Last year i replaced my furnace (just before it died a horrible death). This is my first home and I bought it knowing the furnace was already 27 yrs old and would need replacing sooner rather than later. This furnace is now a yr old and without fail I called the company before the birthday of said furnace to have them check her out. The guy laughed at me when he came to inspect it. Not laughing out of meanness but rather because when you drop 7k plus on a gas furnace and actually know only about oil furnaces one is a little OCD shall we say. I am glad Joeys and family are warm now. The last idiot service repair person was at my mothers home and he decided to yell at her for not “allowing him to come freely into her home whenever he needed” my Navy Bitch came out in full Force-She is not pretty. But she is fierce. I calmly explained that while my mother is a sweet older woman I would make sure they never found the body parts if he ever darkened her property again. I might have gone a little overboard. Or not. Stay warm Joey