Since then, Internet bicycle photography has evolved, and innovative bicycle owners continue to discover new ways to present bicycles in photographs without, you know, just leaning them on something. Take, for example, this email I received from a reader:

Yes, that's a disembodied pair of legs holding up a black shroud, and it's very disconcerting.

By the way, I have very clear memories of shopping for a new road bike in the '90s and going to a shop that sold Kleins, because in the '90s that's what you did--you shopped for Kleins in between grunge concerts and Tae Bo workouts. To this day, whenever I see a Klein, I remember the salesperson who insisted I needed to choose one bicycle over another because it had a better bottom bracket. Not a better frame, not better wheels, not even better shifters. It wasn't even a different bottom bracket interface. (Yes, some Kleins had press-fit bottom brackets in those days, and "Octalink" was probably becoming a thing, but none of the bicycles I was looking at had any of these features.) No, the square taper bottom bracket cartridge itself was theoretically better than the square taper bottom bracket cartridge on a different bicycle, so I needed to base my decision entirely on that.

Obviously I laughed him off, and instead bought the bicycle with better inner tubes.

Here's another email from another reader with a similarly poignant subject line:

From Portland

You know, I often myself riding a cargo bike loaded entirely with bike crap, and it's always sobering to realize you're in a total feedback loop of self-serving bike-dorkery, like the snake eating its own tail:

Actually, "self-serving" isn't really accurate. Using one bike to carry another isn't especially self-serving--unlike asking strangers to buy mountain bikes for you and your family, as forwarded by yet another reader:

HI, we are a family of 4 looking to get back in shape. I always loved mountain biking when younger. I am ready to take it back up and my wife and two children are wanting to as well. Hoping to purchase entry level Trek, Specialized or comparable bikes that are going to last from our local bike shop. We are hoping to raise enough to purchase the bikes and necessary accessories such as helmets. All donations welcome and very much appreciated. Help a family get in shape and spend some much needed quality time together. Thanks for viewing have a great day.

There was some idiot commenting on yesterday's post under the handle "MTBSnob." Maybe he can buy these people some bikes, and then show them how to angle the brake levers.

Whatever they end up with, I only hope they have really good bottom brackets.

In other news, if you live in New York City, you might be interested in attending the following:

This Wednesday night, Vaccaro & White will host a SAFE BIKING IN NEW YORK FORUM. Details below.HOW CAN BIKE RIDERS PROTECT THEMSELVES FROM ACCIDENTSRIGHTS & ADVOCACY - A Forum with Steve Vaccaro & Adam White5BBC Social MeetupDATE: Wednesday, April 30, 2014 TIME: 6:15 PMLOCATION: Westbeth Performance Center, ManhattanDrivers know when they get into an accident they exchange insuranceinformation. But the growing number of bike riders don’t know what todo if they are in an accident. What should bikers know to protectthemselves?That question and other essential information for New York City bikerswill be provided at a forum on Safe Biking in New York on April 30,6:15 p.m. at the Westbeth Performance Center, 55 Bethune Street,Manhattan.

This actually sounds both useful and important, and I should totally go myself, even though I totally won't. As it is, my basic understanding of my rights as a cyclist in New York City is as follows: people are allowed and indeed encouraged to run me over while I'm riding my bike, so I don't have any "rights" per se. However, if I'm lucky enough not to die and the driver doesn't flee the scene there is a small chance I might be able to get some money out of it.

Also, when I talk to the driver's insurance company (assuming the driver even has insurance), their primary concern will be whether or not I was wearing a helment, even if absolutely nothing happened to my head.

Team Sky has reiterated its stance on the painkiller Tramadol following reported claims from former rider Michael Barry that he used the drug while racing for the team.Barry told The Times newspaper that "Tramadol made me feel euphoric, but it’s also hard to focus. It kills the pain in your legs, and you can push really hard.”

Translation: Tramadol gives you what certain politically incorrect people refer to as "retard strength."

By the way, the patron saint of "retard strength" is Jens Voigt:

Anyway, Tramadol is not on the banned list, and it sounds like "lots" of riders are using it, which makes it the asthma medication of the 21st century:

Tramadol was included on the WADA "monitoring programme" in 2012 for "possible in-competition abuse" and its status is under review, meaning it could be added to the WADA Prohibited List for 2015. WADA has acknowledged that the drugs has been found in lots of anti-doping tests it carries out.

It would also explain a lot of the crashes you see:

It is widely suspected that some teams allow their riders to train and race while using the drug despite the risk it can lead to dizziness and so cause crashes.

In fact, Tramadol use may very well be rife in the amateur ranks as well:

I think you misunderstood the shitkicker goal. I believe the family wants to purchase a geological formation known as Mount Bikes. Depending on the location and size of this land parcel, they stand to have a very sound real estate investment.

$0.00? I'm a little disappointed in a society that won't step up and buy stuff for strangers for no apparent reason other than they asked. I mean, c'mon people; if their parents wont buy them stuff anymore, where else are they going to turn? Paying for stuff yourself is for suckers. Buying stuff for those people, well that's sucker nirvana. Sounds about in line with the tridork apocalypse. Bring on the Traumadol.

You should look at all the self serving crap on that gofundme site. Like theres a bunch of "Fund my adoption". If you can't afford to adopt how can you afford to support the kid once you do? Or "I'm an undocumented "citizen". help me with the $33K/year to go to private college because the government will find me if I apply for a loan." This is the internet equivalent of shaking a cup of change from under a dirty blanket on the corner.

Babs, that's hilarious. I haven't heard Strong like bull, smart like fridge in forever. More succinct than "You strong like Rambo look like hero but your brain just like potato" - which appropriately, is a fridge magnet.

Dude-bro are you really getting excited about someone's supposedly incontrovertible brake-lever orthodoxy, given that- there's no such thing- the one talking is a character/caricature...or are you cleverly encouraging the trollery for fun and it's all part of the show? Like this is the show where CJ taunts you about some miniscule bike setup detail and you call him an idiot and we all laugh. Like Urkel saying yet again "Did I do that?" Yes you did Urkel, yes you did. Never mind, I think answered my own question: All of you are a big illusion put here for my amusement.

I would just like to add that I'm pretty sure that is NOT how you do a backdrop for a bike sale, and, disembodied hands preserve nice clean lines. LIKE IN FASCISM.

Every successful blog has a few pathetic doofus attention whores posting nonsense in the comments. It's kind of a status symbol I think. While it feels kind of demeaning to encourage the trolls, they are not going away so we might as well have some fun at their expense.

My (formerly) trusty Blackburn Flea rear light finally won't manage to stay on (yes I do charge it). This has happened once or twice before over time. I'm going Full On Knog at time of next purchase. Whatever the front or back Knog lights hit (red anodized Blinders), they leave burn marks. I shut them off when going near gas stations.

I hope MTBSnob doesnt find out that i slapped a flat bar on my beach cruiser and ride singletrack. Just a coaster brake (yes, its terrifying and thats what makes it awesome) and no levers. My 3-speed twist shifter is set at 4 o'clock at least...

I recently took a picture of my bike lying on the side of a steep hill that was covered in lovely purple flowers and just screamed spring time. Looked at the pictures later on my computer. Poor bike looked like I'd shot it.

I had a kickstand on my bike, and I loved it but I finally had to take it off because none of my friends could bear to be seen riding with me. Kind of sad. Every now and then, when they are not looking, I put my sunglasses under my helment straps just to make those guys nervous. Yeah, they are a pretty insecure bunch.

As long as we're holding out our tin cups, I could really use a nice used pickup truck. C'mon, people, don't make me bust into my mutual funds. Send me a grand or two and I'll send you an autographed picture of my pickup truck. With disembodied hand.

Queenie. go girl. you want a kickstand, have two. I've got a double-leg stands (none disembodied) on all but one bike.

Anonymous Disobedient Fred

That's one of the extras I got with kickstands. They didn't even charge extra for it. Don't have to worry about riding with anyone else. 'Cept my brother who is too old and senile to realize it. It being that we also stuck one on his main bike without him knowing. But the sucker went and bought a trike so now he doesn't need no stinkin' stand.

robotette says towns rinvlde. Well I guess in those cases, a kickstand isn't really necessary

I won't be at the Wednesday night bike safety thing either. Only because I'm lazy and b/c I hope to be back home in Brooklyn when it starts.

I will say about Steve Vaccaro --- one of the guys headlining the talk --- he represented me a couple of years ago when the cops gave me a full-blown disorderly conduct summons for riding a bike.

Not to get into the wearisome specifics of the ticket except that it happened on my morning commute, I wasn't doing anything wrong (not even running a light) --- suffice to say it was dismissed. And Vaccaro was great. I would recommend him as an attorney. And I'd even like hear what he has to say about bike safety. If I was not so lazy.

This morning while I was on my way to work I saw a Wal-Mart fixie with a sweet set of cow horns and mixed color, deep dish wheels being carried atop a $40,000 Volvo station wagon. The driver was sporting a flat brimmed cap and, apparently, an under-developed sense of irony.

Even though I'm a keen proponent of mounting kickstands at the snappier 3 o'clock, I would tolerate them being mounted at the lazy 4 o'clock -- it's really a matter of personal preference, individual style and religious values.

The angle of kickstand *deployment* on the other hand leaves no room for debate. Call me a bigot if you must, but the only acceptable angle for the deployed kickstand is 6 o'clock.

The more obscure teachings of Saint Sheldon would back me up on this, I'm sure.

$400 for a fretless base neck? Amateur. Let me show you how the pro's work.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please allow me to collect money for my new Telsa Model S. If you donate $5000 I will drive to where you live in the continental United States and give you a two (2) day test drive. For $10,000 you get a airfare to either coast where I will meet you in my shiny new car and we will road trip across the country. Whoo hoo.

Mike Barry on Tramadol might explain why that fucking guy crashed so much..like, every race for three years.He's the author of three books, seriously, who reads that shit. The only thing more boring that watching a UCI domestique is reading about a UCI domestique.His Wiki page career highlights:

Stage win at the 2008 Tour of Missouri

Placed 9th in the men's road race at the 2008 Beijing Olympics

Placing 4th overall in the 2003 Tour de Georgia

At the 2006 Tour of Flanders, Barry went down extremely hard in a crash, suffering severe facial cuts and lacerations and also fracturing some vertebrae.

Carried 2kg of dope up his ass for thirteen stages of the TDF for Lance.

On second thoughts, that actually makes a lot of sense. Righteous, sister!

Although the controversial issue of kickstand mounting location remains a topic of contentious debate.

Ideologically and aerodynamically, I favour the streamlined and discreet placement at the bottom bracket, however, through bitter experience I have to concede those grotesque contraptions attaching to the seat and chain stays or the rear wheel mounting bolt are indeed the more efficacious method for keeping your bike upright.

I'm rockin' a centre stand on my sweet ride, dudes. I've got a big ass front carrier for all my duder stuff so the kick stand school of thought just won't cut it 'cause the bike just sort of falls over like a bro who snacked on too much Tramadol. But, like what's so cool is that the centre stand only works in the 12:00 position! I don't have to think at all about the most duder-bro-in the know angle to set it.

I actually tried to do an indiegogo campaign once to buy a goldsprints rig. Made me 35 bucks. Had to sack up, work lots of OT, and save for a year instead. Lesson learned, even if I was trying to do the local bike community a solid. Our local club list serv is rife with "help me raise money for my 10000$ bike tour of Ireland to raise awareness of how bad cancer suks in Vermont or whatever.

CJ checking in. I finally took the salient advice of the commentariat here, and started seeing a therapist. Got me on some good drugs, that seem to be helping. And it's not even costing me anything! THANKS OBAMA!

On the reals, I do not have tourette's, nor asperger's, as previously suggested. He thinks I'm bipolar. Which actually does explain a lot of my risk taking behavior, hypersexuality, impulsivity, inability to manage money and blow it on stupid bike parts. ETC, ETC, ETC.

MTBsnobNYC is not me. He is an idiot and a gaper. If you are into mountain bikes for real, you don't live in fuckin' New York City. You live near mountains. Anyone who self identifies as "hardcore mountainbiker" and lives in the city is a Joey fucktard.

My main problem with the Engin, besides how twee and offensively expensive it is, is it's fucked up old school geometry. The bike would handle a shitload more confidently with the top tube an inch longer, and the boner stem an inch shorter. Plus shorter stays... but it's that snob's bike, and if we wants to ride old school Fred (in the traditional sense) geo, that is his perogative.

I used to rub/rock/rep that same boat anchor SS hub. I think I paid $50 dealer cost 10 years ago. I had problems with it skipping. It also weighs like 550g, which is absurd. A cheapie Deore hub is lighter, and that's no feather.If it was mine, I would prolly go with a freewheel hub, maybe Paul or White, with one of those GT freewheels that sounds like swarm of angry bees.

A dropper post has no place on a rigid bike. You might consider a QR seat clamp. You can shralp that radgnar considerably harder when you are not getting taint slapped.

It's pretty easy to tell what bike parts BikeSnob actually purchases, vs which he gets for "free" in exchange for shamelessly promotion. If it's retardly expensive: freebie.If it is a frugal, bang for the buck choice, that's out of pocket.

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!