I have been diagnosed with BDD and it's had a huge impact on my life. I cannot even leave the house some days because I feel so ugly I am literally terrified that people will throw up if they see me. I can't even wear the clothes I like anymore because I feel like I look so fat in them it makes me sick to my stomach. I have to load my face up with makeup because even though it does not FIX the problem it still helps.

About 3 years ago I lost 200 lbs (I was 350 before.) All my life my mom gave me such a hard time about being ugly and overweight, saying things like nobody would love me because I was so fat and ugly. To lose the weight I began my battle with bulimia and dieting pills. Since I lost all the weight I feel like when I look in the mirror I gained weight instead of losing it.

In the morning it takes me around 3 hours to get ready. I have to wear so much bronzer and tanners that it's becoming ridiculous. People say I do not need makeup but I feel like I could just cry when they say that. I feel trapped in my own body. If I do not wear makeup it is like my world is going to end. People just do not understand that when they make fun of me. Without the makeup I am a worthless, ugly, fat unhappy human being who does not deserve to live and be happy.

This has to stop, it is literally ruining my life and any self confidence I may have left. Someone please help me if you have any ideas about how to gain self confidence and get over this.

The following user gives a hug of support to jordanh2012:Phoenix (06-08-2012)

i feel you i also cover my face in make up and try on clothes for hours before i can leave the house and many days i dont leave the house becuz i feel so ugly and my face is covered in acne scars i have to cake tons of foundation on it and i hate my hair i just hate the way i look and no matter what anyone says i feel so ugly your mom was mean to you and made you feel like this my mom gave me lots of crap about my acne when i was younger and kids made fun of me real bad in school i dont know what to do either