"Maybe it's just me, but I'm not crazy about super hero stories where everything's all dark and moody. Personally, I like the ones where good guys fight giant apes on the moon and stuff. Remember those? I do. That was back when comic book worlds were places you wanted to escape to... not from."

Doreen Green is the note medically and legally distinct from being a mutantnote Originally, she was actually a mutant - it's since been retconned since to be ambiguous because of the copyright issues with X-Men and FOX. known as Squirrel Girl — or, depending on who you ask, either The Anti-Life or The Slayer Of All That Breathes. Believe it or not, she is Marvel Comics' most powerful hero.

Doreen's (official) powers are enhanced strength, speed, agility, and reflexes, as well as the ability to leap several stories. She possesses small razor sharp claws in place of fingernails, and she's able to use small retractable knuckle spikes. She can communicate with squirrels, which she uses to attack and/or distract her enemies (as well as breaking the fourth wall). She also has a semi-prehensile tail (which she can use to cuddle herself with). Oh, and her lips taste like hazelnuts.

Few people actually read the story when it first came out, but after scans of the comic were posted on the Internet, Squirrel Girl slowly became an Internet meme. The fact that Doctor Doom was defeated in such a ridiculous manner, combined with the fact that it was one of the few Doom losses that was never retconned as being Actually a Doombot due to the obscurity and ridiculousness of the story, allowed Squirrel Girl to become a popular Memetic Badass in Internet fight threads — despite having only appeared once in a story that virtually no one had read. She became an Ascended Meme in 2005, when Dan Slott put her on the Great Lakes Avengers in the Great Lakes Avengers: Misassembled mini-series.

Doreen didn't do anything of real importance during said mini-series other than being cute (and a Naïve Newcomer) — in fact, she faced a low point in her superheroine career by being strangled by a E-List Mook (fortunately, that was just a clever Plan on her part). It wasn't until her next appearance in the GLX-Mas Special that her most defining trait became known: in that special, she defeated M.O.D.O.K., Terrax, and even Thanos himself, while evidence was presented that proved she had already defeated Giganto and Mandarin. Her next appearances, all in various other comics, strengthened her status as an invincible hero by having her defeat Deadpool ("you evil, evil man!"), Bi-Beast, and Pluto. This culminated in the Deadpool/GLI Summer Fun Spectacular, where Doctor Doom was shown as being completely afraid to confront her, even after she infiltrated Latveria on her own.

After working with the Great Lakes Avengers for a while, Squirrel Girl came to the conclusion that she was actually holding them back from becoming a great team (because they sat around while she defeated the likes of Fin Fang Foom), so in Marvel's Age of Heroes #3, she announced that she was officially leaving the GLA and striking out on her own.

A short two-page item in I Am An Avenger #1 showed Doreen arriving back in New York City, and (as of New Avengers #7) she is an official Avenger by virtue of being hired as the nanny for Luke Cage's and Jessica Jones' baby girl, Danielle. Since Danielle's been the target of supervillain kidnapping, demonic possession, and other threats in the past, someone like Squirrel Girl was probably necessary to protect the toddler.

Squirrel Girl is best characterized as a Silver Age character, completely out of place in modern comics; she will frequently break the fourth wall to mention this. The fact that she frequently wins against more powerful enemies using ridiculous means can also be seen as a throwback to the Silver Age.

She has shown up ever-increasingly in Marvel's online games.

Despite at first it seeming that she had faded into the background in the main Marvel Universe, she's managed to earn a series of her own: The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl by Ryan North and Erica Henderson, debuting in January 2015. The series follows Doreen at university after leaving her job as nanny, and the various menaces she confronts... and often befriends. The series was re-launched in the new, post-Secret Wars continuity, with the same title (but cheerfully announcing, 'Only Our Second #1 Issue This Year!' on the cover.)

Post Secret Wars she returns to the New Avengers now led by Sunspot, who is currently in charge of A.I.M. During the Avengers Standoff, She, Hulkling, Tippy Toe, and Wiccan were 'kicked off' when A.I.M. went up against the rest of the Avengers, becoming the only members of the New Avengers. Post Civil War II, Squirrel Girl is a founding member of the new U.S.Avengers. (Set to launch in Oct, 2016)

"You'd think that young Doreen Green's mutant power was Super-Adorability, but her abilities go far beyond simple cuteness. Her semi-prehensile tail allows her to display amazing feats of agility...well, yeah, that tail IS pretty adorable. How about the empathic bond she shares with squirrels? That's a good power! But, yeah, it's also kind of adorable."

And This Is For...: Squirrel Girl's letting her squirrels defeat a mook for Monkey Joe. (He couldn't care less.)

Armed with Canon: In her first appearance, Squirrel Girl defeated Doctor Doom. Another writer showed Doom explaining that it was actually a Doombot. Yet, in GLX-Mas, we are told that she really did defeat Doctor Doom (we are also presented with a new picture, thus hinting that she has defeated Doctor Doom at least twice). And to really hammer in the point, in Deadpool/GLI, Squirrel Girl invades Latveria by herself, and Doctor Doom is afraid to even think about challenging her (with an accommodating statement by Tippy-Toe that since her first victory against Doctor Doom was written in by Steve Ditko, it's fully canon — "So deal with it, fanboy.")

Deadpool: Oh c'mon, those stories can't actually count in continuity!

Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking: While the evil, evil man fought Daredevil, he warned him about the walking nukes such as the Iron Mans, the Thors, and the Squirrel Girls. And then when he fought Cable, he warned him about the psychos such as himself, Doctor Doom and Squirrel Girl. Inverted, since Squirrel Girl really is that dangerous, but averted in that she's a superhero and she rarely causes any sort of collateral damage.

Ascended Extra: She went from being a one-shot joke character to an Avenger and a character with her own solo book.

Ascended Meme: Squirrel Girl's original one-shot appearance became a meme in Internet forums, which led to her becoming a permanent recurring character in the Marvel universe as part of the Great Lakes Avengers.

Attack! Attack! Attack!: She's perfectly capable of delivering cans of ass-whooping like this, as Wolverine can attest. And that's without getting to the animal empathy thing (Wolvie's reasonably wary of the army of squirrels she summons when he manages to get her in an armlock).

Badass Adorable: She's positively cute (and positively hot in Mike Deodato's New Avengers run), can talk to squirrels, and can kick more ass than all of Marvel's other heroes combined.

She explains that the actual word impossible isn't part of her personal lexicon, since she feels that the word is very disempowering.

Despite her reputation as one of Marvel's most powerful characters, an infected Luke Cage actually managed to kill her. Click here for proof.

Blade Below the Shoulder: While her knuckle spikes aren't as powerful (or as long) as Wolverine's, she's able to carve through solid wood with them, and her fingernails can cut through reinforced tempered glass.

Call Back: The new comic book references previous lines from Squirrel Girl:

In issue 2, she repeats "I don't need luck, I have Nuts!"

Issue 3's cover has her fighting giant apes on the moon!

In Volume 2 Issue 5, she defeats Doctor Doom again, this time with a swarm of Squirrel Girls (Time Travel, it just makes sense) in a reference to her original win over Doom using a swarm of squirrels.

Flanderization: Her infamous defeat of Doctor Doom was accomplished by creative use of her powers; commanding an army of squirrels to sabotage all of his equipment from the inside. Afterwards it just became a thing that she can beat everyone, even Thanos, by creative power uses or just punching them (usually off panel). Very much Played for Laughs.

Got the Call on Speed Dial: At the age of 14, Squirrel Girl attacked Doctor Doom in order to become Iron Man's sidekick. As an (assumedly older) teenager in New York, she helped the police by catching muggers in Central Park. Later, she joined the Great Lakes Avengers without giving it a second thought. Her life practically revolves about being a superhero, and she has never once complained about her powers, possibly making her unique in any Marvel universe.

Especially considering that she's a mutant, a group traditionally treated like crap on Earth 616. Instead, the media seems to love her.

As a correlation, Tigra (the other furry girl) is magical, but most people think she is a mutant (with the appropriate reactions), and she doesn't correct them. Could Tigra like being counted among the ranks of Squirrel Girl?

Also, do you know why she accepted to become Danielle Cage's nanny? Making ends meet aside, she was hoping for a spot with the New Avengers. And she could've gotten it (she came this close from beating the freakin' Wolverine without help of her squirrel buddies!) if Skadi hadn't waged war on America as she was saving a random guy from getting beat up. It turns out she grew so fond of little Dani, her first thought was to rush to Avengers Mansion and guard her. But then those War Machines started bombing the mansion... But then Daredevil saved the day.

However, she will be an official Avenger with the fall 2015 reboot of New Avengers.

She will be a founding member of the U.S.Avengers in the series launch in late 2016.

Informed Attribute: Her alleged power level. She never actually displays powers beyond increased (but still lower than, say, Spider-Man) strength and agility, along with the ability to control squirrels. She gets an amazing amount of mileage out of the squirrel control, but any villain that can't be beaten by having a small, furry critter wriggle under his armor she beats offscreen (if at all - she hasn't actually appeared that many times or done very much).

The closest she has ever come to defeat was failing to convince Robbie "Penance" Baldwin to return to being Speedball. note Unsurprising - you can't pep-talk someone out of a traumatic, partially-drug induced and reinforced psychosis.

In Unbeatable, she usually doesn't win by directly fighting and defeating an opponent - in fact, Galactus simply picks her up between two fingers, after her attempts to punch his foot have so little effect, he actually flat-out asks if she was trying to buff his shoe. Both Kraven the Hunter and Galactus are bested in a more Guile Hero fashion, by redirecting their attentions based on their respective motivations. To the point of befriending Galactus.

Ironic Echo Cut: Squirrel Girl's victory over Thanos, who possessed the power to screw the Multiverse.

Lethal Joke Character: She doesn't seem threatening at first, but seriously examining the entirety of her Combo Platter Powers makes her reputation disturbingly plausible, even with the most cynical interpretation:

Lastly, the squirrels that she has control of only seem silly until one has encountered the tiny raging terror of a rabid squirrel. They can climb nearly any textured or penetrable surface. They can jump over two meters in a single leap. They are built to survive falling dozens of times their own height from trees without harm. Squirrels are known as destructive pests in homes because the same jaws they use to crack walnuts can chew through things like aluminum siding, metal cables and wiring, and support beams. And she can control MANY squirrels. Now imagine this horde of inescapable living bolt cutters working as a coordinated, intelligent unit. This is what Dr. Doom has nightmares about.

Medium Awareness: Squirrel Girl is fully aware that she is in a comic book, but due to contractual issues she is only allowed to break the fourth wall during the recaps. However, Monkey Joe and Tippy-Toe are not limited by that limitation, so for them there is no fourth wall.

Noodle Incident: Aside from her various scorecards against prominent villains, New Avengers showed that SG has an unspecified "past" with Wolverine of all people. Exactly what that past involved hasn't been revealed, but the two of them refer to each other by their given first names and Logan reminds her "we promised never to see each other again." In his second issue letters column on Unbeatable, Ryan North "explained" that she was mad at him for stealing a cab from her.

Parody Sue: Squirrel Girl has stats up to Physical God level and villains of the caliber of Doctor Doom fear her, yet most of her victories are off-screen and her superpowers are based on squrriels.

Progressively Prettier: In her first appearance, Squirrel Girl looked really weird. Nowadays... it depends on the artist, but she's generally depicted as being much, much, much cuter than she looked in her first appearance. She arguably looks her best in Marvel's one-shot Valentine's Day special I ♥ Marvel: Masked Intentions.

Lampshaded in her new series which shows a brief flashback to her first appearance. She concludes that everyone makes questionable fashion choices at fourteen.

Reversed, however, in The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl, in which Erica Henderson draws her as round-faced, buck-toothed, and with a much chubbier physique than is usual for heroic superhero comic characters.

Her knuckle spikes have not been seen or mentioned after her first appearance in 1991.

The first issue of Unbeatable Squirrel Girl ignored her mutant origins, instead saying multiple times the she has "partially squirrel blood." It has been speculated (but not confirmed) that this may have been due to the ongoing feud between Fox (who currently controls the X-Men film rights) and Marvel.

The same series also did away with the hazelnut lips attribute.

Ryan North: It just strikes me as such a sexualized thing to attach to the character. Like, do Spider-Man's lips taste like insects? We don't know, because nobody cares. I think there's a lot more really interesting things to talk about when you talk about Squirrel Girl than what this woman's lips taste like.

Rule of Funny: The only reason she can get away with being so overpowered; It's funny

Showy Invincible Hero: Particularly her squirrels, who like to discuss how she manages to surpass unbelievable odds.

Secret Identity: Though she does a REALLY bad job at hiding that Doreen Green is Squirrel Girl, one of her biggest fears is that someone will make the connection dispite her efforts. Played for laughs in Deadpool: Too Soon, where Deadpool tries to hold this secret over her for blackmail, only for everyone else in the room to cut off his threats to tell the both of them that they already knew, including the Punisher, Rocket Raccoon (who never met Doreen before) and Spider-Ham (who isn't even from their dimension).

Serial Escalation: Each new issue answers one question: how many overpowered super villains can Squirrel Girl defeat?

Spotlight-Stealing Squad: Acknowledged and mocked when she decides to leave the GLA because with her around the others would never get any screen time, on account of the fact that her Memetic Badass status has grown to such a point where they don't even try to help her defeat such uber-baddies as Fin Fang Foom, Baron Mordo and Ego the Living Planet. Instead they choose to hang around playing cards while she effortlessly defeats them.

Stalker with a Crush and Stalking Is Love: Squirrel Girl's crush over Speedball. She defeats his enemies for him, she breaks into dungeons for him, she invades sovereign countries for him, she travels through time for him, and her fan letters to him are screened by the FBI! And ignoring that time when he was too deep for her, he has responded to her crush with what's seemingly equal attraction. She is not a fan of Penance.

Take Our Word for It: Every takedown of a top tier villain, except for that first one against Doctor Doom. And Galactus in Unbeatable Squirrel Girl, although the issue pretended it was going to do this at first. And her second win against Doctor Doom in Unbeatable Squirrel Girl.

In the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Beats Up the Marvel Universe graphic novel, her own "jerky clone" (as opposed to her evil clone), who has all her power and none of her restraint, is shown taking down a number of top tier heroes and villains in a variety of creative ways. The "jerky clone" was last seen beating up Annihilus in the Negative Zone.

Actually, now that she's got her own book and has been in several others, clever writers have found ways to show how she beats bad guys and sometimes good guys.

Take That: A fair bit of Squirrel Girl's dialogue and surrounding plot points consist of these; aimed at whatever the writer finds annoying about every other comic in existence (the escapism quote above, Batman's in-universe status as an urban legend, etc.). Then, just to make sure no one missed the reference, often one of the squirrels will pop up at the corner of the page and state outrightwhat it meant.

Then there was the whole shot at Penance. She tries to convince him he's not at fault, citing all the other stuff that other heroes have done that was so much worse (but managed not to get blamed for). Eventually, he cuts her off for not understanding, culminating in him shouting how he's "deep" now and repeatedly smashing his head into a wall to show how "deep" he is.

Time Travel: She attempted to travel into the past in order to romance pre-Penance Speedball. Somehow she traveled into the future...It's a very sly reference. When Squirrel Girl tries to travel to the past, she sets the time machine to take her to "Speedball's second to last coordinates" (the last time Robbie Baldwin was Speedball prior to the events of Civil War, since if she showed up in Stamford, she'd be one of the victims of Nitro's explosion). Prior to Civil War, Speedball's last appearance in a Marvel comic was in a comic set in the year 2099.

It also creates a Crowning Moment of Funny when she goes to Latveria to borrow Doctor Doom's time machine. Doom just sighs and points her to the room, not even bothering to try and stop her.

She recently time traveled in Unbeatable Squirrel Girl and again faced off against Doctor Doom, who was also time traveling. This Doctor Doom came from the time right after she originally beat him.

Vague Age: Originally 14, but now it's vague. Presumably at least 18, since she's old enough to attend college.

In Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Volume 2, she is a 2nd year computer science student in college, which probably makes her 19-20 years old.

She can hold up an entire building by herself, throw a group of people several blocks, and be run over by a train without injury, so yeah, she is pretty strong in the classical sense.

Xanatos Gambit: She may have been strangled by that E-List Mook during the big brawl in Great Lakes Avengers: Misassembled #4, but that was just to let him stand where she wanted him in order for her to let the other squirrels avenge the murder of Monkey Joe. She could have defeated him herself but it was personal.

In Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Vol 2, she allows Mole Man's giant monster to stomp on her several times instead of defeating it. This so that Mole Man would redirect his affections to the monster and away from her.

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