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This was in response to an ad looking for surrogate mothers. The ad is long and boring, so I'll sum it up: they pretty much pay healthy women a lot of money to carry another couple's baby.

From Me to ************@***********.org:

Hello,

I saw your ad looking for surrogate mothers, and was wondering if you had any openings for a surrogate father. I am willing to sacrifice my body for families who cannot have a child. I would get the sperm intended for the surrogate mother inserted into my balls, and then impregnate the surrogate mother through passoniate intercourse, to assure that the baby is conceived in a more natural environment. Nobody wants a freak petri dish baby as their child.

I saw that compensation was $25,000 for the mother. Since I am doing all of the hard work, however, I am asking for $50,000 as compensation. Also, the surrogate mother must fit the following criteria:

- 18 to 24 years old
- Brunette or Blonde (no redheads)
- Not too short, but not taller than me because that is just weird
- Breast size of C cup or larger
- Not fat
- She must shave "down there"
- STD free (although chlamydia is okay because I already have that)

I look forward to hearing from you. If possible, please send a list of potential surrogate mothers for me to knock up, and include pictures. I will get back to you with who I want to impregnate first.

Thanks,

Mike

From Mary ********* to Me:

Mike,

There is no "surrogate father" program. Sorry.

Mary *********

From Me to Mary *********:

Mary,

Surely there are some fathers who would want this. Just ask your clients if they would be interested in my services. I am sure you will get a positive response.

I forgot to mention that any potential surrogate mothers you have for me must be willing to do anal.

Thanks,

Mike

From Mary ********* to Me:

What is wrong with you? Let me be very clear: there will never be a surrogate father program. One can't simply get another's sperm placed in their "balls." Frankly, your demands are disgusting and you are making a mockery of our program. Do not contact me again.

From Me to Mary *********:

Oh, come on. What demands were disgusting? The anal sex? Studies show that women are 75% more likely to get pregnant if they take it in the ass first.

Believe me, this is not about the sex for me. I just want to help our country's most precious resource: our children. They are our future, you know. You hate children, don't you? By refusing my services, you may as well be working at an abortion clinic.

Please reconsider,

Mike

"Watch what people are cynical about, and one can often discover what they lack.” -- Gen. George S. Patton

They are not hoaxes but they are staged. The guys looks for classified ads and then replies to him. I was reading about the site and he only gets responses to about 10% of the emails he sends. So basically he is fishing to find the people that will engage him. There are probably even more that figure out what is going on after his first few responses.

I think the guy is brilliant because he starts out as a very legitimate responder to the original ad. He doesn't just jump in at the get go which would likely scare off everyone. Some funny reads in there. The hot tub repair guy was great.

Jeez...can you imagine a show based around this texting site starring Sam Kinison where the episode begins with him reading the text calmly and then we backtrack to see what happened to bring him to the point where he actually typed the text to someone and every episode would end with him typing the text that he read in the morning...could be a winner...except that he's dead and all...

And with that I'm off to the kitchen to make myself a lesbian omelette...LLFHS in response to one of Graeme's post's

"The anal beads may have scarred SNIC for life. That guy is tough as fucking nails!! No normal guy could take anal beads to the head and survive! "...OLO on SNIC's near death experience at TLW

"I'm a 45-year-old man, and I still like to wear a thong or a speedo when I go swimming.
Not because I have a great body, it's just an easy way to make sure I have the hotel swimming pool all to myself."...Bullwinkle for quite obvious reasons!

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