Safe & Smart Summer - People we meet

Last week while I was talking about nightlife I suggested that there might be a charming person you could be interested in and wanted to meet up with. Let's tiptoe around the subject. Today I would like to talk about tips on how to know him or her better without putting yourself in vulnerable position. So my little sister, stay smart and safe this summer.

Going out for a date with a person you met last night might be fun. Before fun begins let someone know where, are you going, who with and what time are you going to be back. Meet in a public place so if you need to ask for help you are able to do so. I do not know what you like but first dates or meet ups are an opportunity for me to have fun rather than a romantic time. If you are still very tempted with the idea of a romantic date in a secluded beach, make it a double date. There is no reason why you shouldn’t take a friend with you.

I would suggest communicating in various ways with a date before the meet up. Phone calls and texts will help you to make up your mind whether you are still interested. I have playfully asked for a photo with something that person mentioned before, for example a cup of coffee.

You can easily find out if the photo was downloaded from the internet by using Google Reverse Image Search, TinEye and Copyscape. If it was stolen, do not risk it. Why would someone with pure intentions steal a photo? There is nothing wrong with some research before the meeting. Google search might be helpful. Lately, I have seen a very terrifying case, for more click here.

Listen to your gut feeling. You do not have to meet with everyone who wants to meet up with you. There is no reason why you should waste your time, and the other person’s, while thinking: ‘I would rather go shopping with Amy, or stay at the beach with Carla, or watch another episode of The Suits’.

Stick to the plans you have made and shared with friends and family. If something goes wrong it will be easier for your friends to find and help you. Be back on time. When I was younger I would always say to my mum where and what time I was going to be back. I have to say that most of the time I was earlier than estimated. It is just simple courtesy, so other people do not worry, and it is the way to protect yourself. I am over twenty years old and I still say what time I am going to be back. I send message to friends I was out with, when I get back home. Not five metres to, not when I am opening doors. I text people when I am safely sitting on my own bed with a glass of water. Actually, I expect the same from my friends and partner as I want to know that they are safe too and that I can react in time, if necessary.

So you went to meet one person and somehow he brings his friend without letting you know? It is time for a quick call for your friends to join you, or just postpone the date. In my case I would not waste my time any more.

It depends what you are looking for from this relationship but make sure you state this clearly. Set the boundaries and do not be afraid and do not take it to heart if someone laughs at them. You are there to make friends and if someone is looking for more, or if you are looking for more while the other person is not, just go your own way. Shake hands and that is it. There is going to be another person looking for exactly what you are looking for.

Things could end there and you could have the time of your life. What if you don’t?

Have your charged phone with you. Send a message to your friends if your date is causing you uneasy feelings so they can ‘accidentally’ bump into you. Is your date getting too handsy? Say that you do not appreciate it, remove hand from your back, leg, face, knee, arm etc. If it makes you uncomfortable, it makes you uncomfortable. People have to respect this, even if they do not have a problem with others touching them. Personally, I only let people close to me touch my face. I do not like nor appreciate strangers doing so. Not a chance that I would let someone new stroke my face, unless there is a huge attraction between us.