My initial reaction is that I would take the grope by a woman. I would want to see her first, to decide whether I might rather take the radiation of a naked body scan, or just not fly. I might have to explain the object she feels in my pants. If she looked like a dyke or a dog, I would have to take one of the other options.

If you say you want to opt out, and you see a man with his hands out, or an unacceptable woman, can you change your mind without getting even more airport security attention (like a backroom interview or strip search)? Could you look over the security guards and say, "I'll take that one!"

Call me sexist or what you will, but I wouldn't want my wife to be groped by a male security guard even if she was OK with it. I would be OK with her being groped by a woman if she was OK with it and I could watch.

Sandra Elliott of Denver said she is no prude but that a recent pat-down at John Wayne Airport was so humiliating that she is considering no longer traveling to see her grandchildren in Newport Beach.

"These women's hands were thrust firmly in my crotch. They pulled up my sweater and stuck their hands inside of my pants, plus thoroughly groped my breasts," Elliott said of screeners she encountered before her Nov. 1 flight back to Denver. "Please know that I am not a prude. I am not adverse to being touched by others, sometimes intimately, but this was absolutely overboard."

I think I'll tell them I have AIDS, haven't be touched in a while, and to enjoy them selves. In reality, me having AIDS would pose no actual risk and for them to insist on other methods would be discrimination. Epic shit may follow.

Ha ha. Michael Savage had a great suggestion. Fart in the face of the one who gropes you.

LOL dude, but seriously this is genius

I for one will just simply refuse to fly, if every one does the same this problem will go away pretty fast. I understand some need to fly for business but this is ridiculous so unless you have to, simply don't