February 3, 2014

Completing a Family through Adoption.

I have several friends that have adopted children or who are in the process of adopting, and in the blogging network there are many who share their amazing stories about their adoption journey: It's crazy how many different routes to adoption there are.
As a stepmother I can relate to the feeling of "adopting" children that I didn't physically give birth to; it doesn't mean I love them any less. In my opinion all children are amazing and deserve loving homes to feel safe, loved, and nurtured in. I've noticed all adoption journeys have one thing in common; its the extraordinary amount of love the families have for their children and the amount of loving support they have from their friends and family.

Today I'm sharing an interview I had with my friend Amy Sperandeo about her adoption journey; a journey of hope and love that her whole family took to add two handsome boys to their family.

Q: How did you come to the decision to adopt?
A: It's hard to explain. I just had a feeling that our family wasn't complete. When I brought it up with my husband he agreed. Neither one of us is able to have children of our own so adoption seemed the obvious solution.

Q: How did you know adoption was right for your family?
A: I knew our family has been so blessed and we have so much love for one another. Family is so important and we all agreed that we wanted to share what we have with another child. Seems God's plan was for us to share it with two more.

Q: You chose to adopt through the foster care program; why this route over international or domestic open/closed adoption, etc.?
A: I watched a video posted by the Dave Thomas Foundation, it touched my heart and broke my heart to see so many children suffering and longing for a family. Everyone wants a new, perfect baby, we wanted the "unwanted".

Q: How did you prepare your family for new and older children?
A: A LOT of talking. A Lot. Cody and I took classes through the Utah Foster Care Foundation and we would come home and discuss what we learned with the kids. We didn't sugar coat anything. We let the kids know about the horrible experiences foster kids have been through, how they would have behaviors that we weren't used to, and how they needed our unconditional love, etc.

Q: How has the transition been for your children?
A: We have good days and we have bad days. Mostly good. I am actually amazed by how fast they have all bonded. They love each other. It's incredible to see how similar children are, despite completely different backgrounds. At the same time, it's devastating to see the impact of neglect and abuse and know how different things could have been.

Q: Were you worried personalities would clash between your children?
A: I wasn't as worried about personalities clashing as I was behaviors rubbing off on other siblings. I knew our boys had seen and heard things that most children their age haven't, and I was very worried about them teaching the other kids bad things.

Q: Is adoption expensive or is this common belief a myth?
A: Adopting from foster care is FREE. All expenses are reimbursed at the time of finalization. Also, most children who are adopted from foster care will receive a subsidy after finalization.

Q: What is the biggest lesson you've learned through your adoption process?
A: I've learned so many lessons. Hard to say which is the biggest. I've learned that I can do hard things. I've learned that life isn't about what is easy and convenient. What exactly is the point of living a comfy life anyway? Things get super tough around here, but man when we make it through it sure feels good. When my son cries in my arms because he's having a bad memory, it straight up kills me...but when he looks up at me and tells me he feels better, there is no feeling like it in the world.

Thank you Amy for sharing your adoption story with us!

If you're thinking about adoption and have more questions feel free to contact Amy at