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Tuesday, 15 May 2018

We Need To Talk About Troll 2

Dear reader, at the beginning of May I had a truly life changing experience. I watched the best worst movie ever made, Troll 2. I don't think I can accurately explain what it's like to watch Troll 2. It has absolutely nothing to do with the original Troll movie, and it's on Netflix right now should you wish to experience this magic for yourself (and you really should).

Calling it the best worst movie ever might seem like a weird way to sell it, but it truly is. The team behind Troll 2 set out to making a serious horror film and ended up with well..... Troll 2. It was never intended to be a sequel to Troll, and was originally titled Goblins. It has no trolls in it at all. Troll 2 is a true cult classic, and since I first saw it I've watched it multiple times, talked about it daily, and watched the documentary about it, aptly titled Best Worst Movie.

I feel sad that it took me to the age of 30 to finally see Troll 2, it's everything I've ever wanted in a so-bad-it's-good movie. The fact that everyone involved really committed, and thought they were making a truly scary horror film shows. The actors are mostly amateurs, in fact the Father in the film was played by a dentist called George Hardy (my new hero) who had never acted in a film before, who continued his dentistry throughout filming and is still a dentist now. The acting in it is something else. I just, I can't really describe it. There aren't the right words. But you really need to watch it. Please. Please watch it and tell me all your feelings about it. Join me in my obsession. If you've already seen it, please comment with your adoration of it so we can quote it at each other!

My best friend Fal introduced me to Troll 2, and I feel like it's my responsibility to help share it with the world. It's like nothing you've ever watched before. It has an incredible cult following, people throw Troll 2 viewing parties, with Troll 2 themed food, and I maybe have made Troll 2 inspired mint chocolate bark to take to Fal's house for a BBQ because that's how much we are obsessed with this film. Once you've seen it, I hope you'll understand.

'Nilbog? That's goblin spelled backwards!'

Troll 2 is endlessly quotable, always hilarious, and you just need to watch it. Since we watched it, we've talked about it every single day and can't stop hunting down GIFs from the film, the very scarce merch inspired by it, and more information on it. Sometimes are the stars align and true magic happens, and that happened with Troll 2. It's not the film anyone intended to make, it's so, so much better.

Also, I should probably mention that the whole reason this film even got made in the first place is because the director's wife was annoyed with her friends for becoming vegetarians, so she wanted to write an anti-vegetarian propaganda horror film. REALLY!!