I try to keep politics out of the Dick of the Month. I’ve talked about Rush Limbaugh before, but that was because he’s personally a dick, I don’t care about his dickish politics. But alas, sometimes you do something so outrightly dickish in the name of politics, that we have to feature you anyway. Such as Jeremy Faison’s idiotic rant in favor of bullying on the Tennessee state congressional floor.

And that is where our future Vice-President Paul Ryan (please let me be wrong!!) comes into the story. You see he and his crony Mitt Romney are trying to get elected by, well…by us, actually.

Unfortunately for Paul Ryan he had a habit in his younger days of talking about hero, Ayn Rand. Now the Ayn Randian philosophy, called Objectivism, is that charity is a bad thing and that the only way to further society is to promote self-interest, selfishness, and unmitigated free enterprise.

In case you want an idea of how that might work, play the game Bioshock, because the hellish underwater dystopia of Rapture is based on the ideology of Ayn Rand’s Objectivism.

I’ve seen on the news an expert on Objectivism talk about how Ayn Rand would not have liked Mitt Romney, because of how much he donates to charity and to the Mormon Church, especially, since the Mormon Church uses that money to fund its own charitable activities.

But Paul Ryan certainly would have made Ayn Rand proud this time. You see, he was trying to distance himself from his Objectivist roots to make himself look better for the camera to the poor populace who he needs to vote for him and Romney.

Ryan got some pictures taken inside a Soup Kitchen, washing some dishes in a suit and tie…and an apron. The problem is…this was apparently after the lunch-time meal was served around noon, when the Soup Kitchen wasn’t even open. The dishes were already clean and he just sprayed water on them.

He also lied to the person in charge and claimed that they had permission to film in there. They didn’t. Paul Ryan got his pictures, washing the clean dishes, and left. The pictures went viral, as was intended, and the owner of the Soup Kitchen was pissed about it.

You see, the St. Vincent De Paul Society Soup Kitchen runs on donations from private institutions such as wealthy donors and organizations. As the society president states:

“We’re a faith-based organization; we are apolitical because the majority of our funding is from private donations. It’s strictly in our bylaws not to do it. They showed up there, and they did not have permission.”

First off, we have Ryan’s own comments that would make Ayn Rand very sad, “This is what makes society go. It makes it work. Helping people.”

Secondly, we have the damage he’s done to the institution that would probably even make Ayn Rand blush.

You see, because of letting the Republican VP nominee into the soup kitchen, the St. Vincent De Paul Society lost a number of their Democrat donors. Then, for coming out and saying that Paul Ryan used his position and influence to lie his way through the doors and that he wasn’t allowed in there after all, the St. Vincent De Paul Society lost a number of their Republican donors.

So, for cleaning a few spotless pans so hard that you managed to put a Soup Kitchen, feeding the poor and homeless, out of business…you, Congressman Paul Ryan are the October Dick of the Month.