Making the best of bed rest

Practical ways to cope with a prone pregnancy

Aileen Weintraub

I sat on the examining room table wearing nothing but a
flimsy paper robe trying to comprehend the words that were coming out of my
doctor’s mouth. I was 18 weeks pregnant and hardly showing my baby bump. When I
was finally able to sort out what my doctor was saying, I understood that I’d
be tremendously lucky if my baby made it to 24 weeks. I had three uterine
fibroids, and one was pressing on my cervix, causing early effacement. I was
designated to five months of full bed rest and told not to get up until I felt
labor pains.

I didn’t realize it then, but I was far from alone. Each
year in the United States, approximately 700,000 women end up on bed rest,
suffering from complications that force them to check out of life, lie down,
and wait. The idea behind bed rest is that otherwise normal activities, such as
lifting, exercising and going to work, will cause additional strain to an
already fragile state. Simply stated, bed rest helps stabilize a woman’s body.

Putting your life on hold for a long period of time is no
easy task. Luckily, there are many practical ways to cope and keep your sanity
during these days in waiting.

Ask for help

Starting with the basics: Each morning, have your partner
pack a cooler full of nutritious meals and snacks to keep bedside for easy
access. Next: Don’t be afraid to reach out to your community. Asking for help
is difficult, but finding an extended support system is key. Relying on a few
go-to people who can run errands for you, go grocery shopping, cook, and assist
with other daily needs will make life infinitely better. Many times people want
to help; they just don’t know how.

Keep your mind active

You may not be able to move around much, but you can still
exercise your mind. Finding ways to stay alert will keep brain fog at bay and
lift your spirits. Do crossword puzzles, read books, balance your checkbook, or
take up a new hobby such as knitting or origami. Julia Jeon-Stewart of Stone
Ridge was on bed rest for three weeks due to premature labor. She says, “I
learned that being on bed rest is frustrating and challenging to not only
myself but the entire family. I got through bed rest by reading the Sunday
Times all week, journal writing, which helped me clear my thoughts and organize
life’s curve balls, and shopping online in preparation for the baby. I tried my
best to keep up with my active 4-year-old son by building Lego sets, playing
board games, coloring, and watching movies.”

Remember: It’s temporary

It is also beneficial to acknowledge the emotional
ramifications of being on bed rest. Bed rest can turn an otherwise joyful time
into one wrought with fear and uncertainty. Janna Cohen of Stone Ridge was on
modified bed rest for four-and-a-half months due to a short cervix. She says,
“There were so many hours in the day where I just felt sorry for myself. I
began to reflect. I knew that this was a temporary state, and, knowing that
this would soon be over, I realized it was a challenge I could overcome.”
Talking to someone you trust who can relate to your experience is another way
to help you sort through mixed emotions.

Get a massage

Physically speaking, it’s important to keep your circulation
flowing. Check with your doctor to see if you can have regular prenatal
massages. Not only will it help alleviate aches, pains, and stiffness, it will
help you de-stress. Rebecca Larsen, a licensed massage therapist and doula from
Rosendale explains, “Massages can greatly ease discomfort and address the
physiologic changes by moving waste through the body, working with the
overstretched ligaments, and connecting a woman to her pregnancy in a positive
way. When you cannot move around much, the health benefits of massage act on
your body as if you’d just taken a nice walk.”

Bed rest will change your life in myriad ways, but the very
best way to cope with this challenge is to keep your eye on the prize. After
five harrowing months in bed, my beautiful boy was born with a huge dent on his
head from being pushed up against my fibroids. The dent quickly faded, but I
knew then that we had been in this together all along, and every endless moment
of bed rest had been worth the wait.

Aileen Weintraub is a freelance writer living in Ulster
County. She is currently writing a memoir entitled “Womb Service” about her
time on pregnancy-related bed rest.

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