Almost every relationship site has a checklist for how to tell if someone is a slut or a jerk. The G4G team thought it was time for some balance. So this post, made of tips from old fashioned moms, dads, and guys who actually know how to pick ‘em, is on how to tell a woman is not a slut. The next is going to be how to tell a guy is not a jerk.

How to Tell a Woman is NOT a Slut

1. She is modestly dressed, even in the peak of summer.

Modesty standards vary from culture to culture, and by situation, so you may have to play this one by ear. However, the non slut will be modest relative to those around her and what is customary. She’s obviously not trying to get male attention by advertising sexual availability through her clothing or lack thereof.

She’ll be the girl wearing loose fitting, draped garments in a hot climate, or the one wearing truly comfortable dancing clothes and shoes in the club.

2. She behaves politely, but not capitulating.

She behaves civilly to everyone within reason. She says please and thank you to people serving her. She calls men and women much older than her Sir or Ma’am or her cultural equivalent. However, stealing a line from Troy, she is well practiced in saying no to men.

3. She is well groomed, but for real.

If she wears makeup at all, it is for work, special occasions, or to cover a scar. She likes her face and skin to feel clean, and likes to smell good. She has a mom who hounded her almost or perhaps beyond the point of dysfunctional harassment about hygiene and neatness. As frumpy as she may appear compared to the painted women around her, she’s as comfortable to be close to as a teddy bear fresh out of the laundry. Speaking of which…

4. Hearts and teddy bears, unicorns and handicrafts.

She actually wears t-shirts she painted herself. She knows what an applique is. She wears hearts despite all the feminists saying not to because it scares guys (read alpha pseudo commitmentphobes and betas beating their heads against the Hollywood sign) away. She weaves friendship bracelets for her friends, or if she’s more handy with tools, makes friendship pins, barettes, and necklaces.

By the way, you can open by asking about some bit of home made fluff she’s wearing.

5. Her hands smell faintly of onions.

This woman cooks often enough that no matter how much she washes her hands, or what kind of hand lotion she wears, the smell of onions is locked into her pores. The few days you catch her not smelling like onions, she smells like cinnamon, nutmeg, and/or allspice.

Because she cooks at least for herself, any fake nails will be press-on. Her nails will also not all be an even length unless they’re all short.

6. She is a real athlete.

Her idea of sports is more than aerobics or riding a bike that goes nowhere. She may not be a pro, but she takes what she does seriously, even if it’s just her daily walk. Not all non athletes are sluts of course. Just that being an athlete reduces a woman’s chances of being a slut dramatically because, liberal as she may be politically or socially, she has body confidence. She doesn’t need to be physically perfect to believe in herself as physically worthy of caring for. Her idea of fitness doesn’t come from television. It comes from the pavement, some weights, a racket, a bat, or sufficiently avoiding finding her back or face on a mat.

She knows enough of personal victory and has racked up enough success that she doesn’t need to screw random guys to bolster her ego.

7. She talks about her dad/family in the first lengthy conversation.

By the time you’ve had a real talk with her, she’s told you about her parents in positive terms, and maybe about the time her brother read her diary. She’ll tell you about how she was raised, and whether or not she adheres to that, and how closely. Without necessarily saying so, she’s giving you fair warning that if you’re not commitment material, you’d best end the date and go your merry way, or things will get ugly. If you’re not husband material, you do not fit into her life. You don’t even fit her profile. If you are looking for a wife, then this is good news for you. From there, you can relax and focus on love and compatibility issues. This is your cue to make a spark.

8. She is escorted, especially after dark.

Women with honor usually come from families of men with honor. When they’re away from their family, they often attract male friends who function as brothers (not emotional tampons). When she goes out at night, it’s because one or more of them invited her, or volunteered to hang out with her and female friends.

For this reason, to catch a non slut, it’s best to work on your day game, because you won’t find many of them out partying unescorted or in a party of fewer than three female friends. If you do figure out a guy with her is a platonic friend, you should be ready to pass his scrutiny perhaps before hers. If you are, then it’s cool, but if he doesn’t like you, you’re done. With a non slut, the male relatives and close friends are the scale you’re being measured against.

9. She has an air of innocence.

It’s hard to define what this is, but you know it when you encounter it. She is a sensitive person who believes in love and romance. Though she is careful, she doesn’t want to believe that you mean her any harm. This makes her very vulnerable to lying, predatory types. Although “rescuing” isn’t what some may view as a healthy way of describing the act of taking her off the market, the cold truth is that this is what you’re doing. You’re snatching her up before she gets rolled under the combine that is dating life in the west. If you look deep down, emotionally this is basically what you’ll feel too. “Us against the world.”

If you don’t feel protective/territorial about a woman, I don’t care how hippy you are. You should worry. Even submissives feel that way towards their Dommes. If someone harms their woman, it would tear out their heart. It’s part of what I like to call “primal monkey panic”: a somewhat irrational feeling of panic that you could lose a woman and worse that who you lose her to might harm her.

10. Last but not least, she LOVES kids, and kids LOVE her.

Babies smile at her because she reminds them of their mom. Old granny type women call them beautiful in the grocery store because she reminds them of themselves when they were young. If a kid is lost or needs some help, they ask her because something about her just says “mommy”. Her gynecologist dreams of the day he will be the catcher of her special offspring.

…and if for some reason she should have to scold someone else’s kids, they don’t talk back to her.

We hope this list is useful at least in clarifying some things. Just remember, there are exceptions, and life didn’t always go perfectly for everyone in this age of casual sex and divorce culture. Some people are doing the best with what information they have, but at the same time character and honor still is what it is.

Be also mindful that hoes mimic the traits of nurturing women when they’re looking for a retirement plan. If you’ve fallen in love with someone, and her flavor is on the courtesan side, you have a decision to make whether you want to break up, be the pimp, or be the client. Whatever you decide, it’s just good to know what you’re getting into.

This list should also be useful to players/PUA’s who are looking for ethical ways to get their casual sex desires fulfilled. If a girl has many of the above behaviors or patterns, you may unintentionally break her heart by getting into a casual encounter or relationship. If she’s not built for slutting around, you could be adding momentum to whatever downward spiral she’s on. Since there are plenty of fish in the sea for you, it’s best to throw that one back. It’s too young.

This is the thing about loving, nurturing women as opposed to the brutal sort: no matter how old the woman is, love is forever young. This is why we miss people who loved us and who we loved when they die even of old age or a lengthy illness. They might have been old as dirt, but their love always felt brand new.

So basically, a non slut always keeps her newness because she always keeps her potential to love. The loss of it is the loss of her life, so she lives her life in a way that preserves it.

11 Responses to “10 Maternal Signs: How to Tell a Woman is NOT a Slut”

This article is ridiculous and untrue as all of the above applies to me, every single bit, I am all of the above polite modest, respectable honourable all of the above and yet… yet… I have made love to nearly 100 men and women. Explain that!!!!

I was listening to guys at work talk crap about how to tell if a girl is a slut. They were idiots and thought they knew it all. They were insecure, miserable, “macho” and “tough” guys who not only cheat on women, but on themselves.They were the first to “have the answers” about what and who is a slut, but the last to know how to open a car/restaurant door for a lady — any lady. Fat, skinny, tall, short, old, young, white, black or brown, etc. They knew nothing. Ignorant, immature, closed minded fools. They were ghetto.

Im getting off path here, but basically what I am trying to say is that any female may fit the descriptions of “what a slut is.” Some females are outgoing and intend to have clean fun. Some intend to only bang ( too sad ). Just because a handful of skanky girls fit the “good girl” mold, but get around does not mean they speak deception for all females and does not mean all females are cheating sluts. They are only degrading and representing themselves not other credible legit females. I also find it sad for some people to cheat themselves out of experiencing fun, exhilarating, euphoric love. True, clean, fun love. It takes a true intellectual/intelligent/bright person to experience such passion. And, passion could be anything that make you two connect! Even if its simply a day dream. healthy thoughts build stronger roads into the future.

I day dream, plan and design thoughts of building a small, wooden, cherry wood table to take my girl out to our favorite secluded spot at our favorite beach to sit, bullshit around, and drink her favorite champagne. I would LOVE to take a small BBQ pit to cook small portions of various meats and vegetables and dine in silence while watching sunset. We would walk back to our car barefooted with sand stuck in between our toes, ocean water soaked in the bottom of my khakis dragging, and her dress floating and folding between her thighs, highlighting her petite contours as I’m reminiscing and holding her hand. I would open the door to my dream car (a black 1958 VW bug with white walls and a black rag top sun roof) so she could get inside, all while smiling and seeing her double left dimple crease and nose snicker with nervous joy. All this will be happening in the perfect balance of being cold from the ocean breeze, but warm with happiness from our beach date. Im proud to say my GF fits all descriptions in this blog and many more, which I will keep secret to myself. I plan to marry her once she is done with school.

And, to all you ladies: Don’t let people tell you guys don’t fantasize about their wedding. My girl and I have been dating for 7 months (32 weeks. Yes I keep track of how long we have been together ;). I asked her out on a Thursday at 4:07pm) and I already know how I want to propose to her. She is dying to know, but that will ruin it and nobody knows but I! And, soon her of course when she is out of school (incentive to work in school and to finish)

To end with this universal side note for all male and females: There are sluts everywhere, there are great girls everywhere. There is also a bunch of crap out there circulating. All you need to know is yourself, what you love and where you want to be destine; at least hope to where you want to be. It’s subject to change, but at least it gives motivation to work towards something. Also, there is no specific criteria to how to tell whether a guy or a girl is a slut. Truth is there are bad people, and good people; Both groups contain males and females. Some have a track record, some are fresh into the dating game. All that really matters is 1) Trust in yourself, your accomplishments, aspirations and the one YOU choose to commit to; 2) your relationship (to RELATE) starts when the two of you have come together to enjoy each others company. leave the bad in the past, and take the good and run with it. “Let your relationship grow, not your jealous or insecure thoughts ( my gf told me that )” Enjoy what time you have left on this Earth with your loved one and build memories, not bad habits of self destruction. Peace to you all and good luck with everything you do.

A woman shouldn’t let male friends have any influence on her love life . If she does chances are they dated or have a history of sex and she don’t wanna give that up . In other words she wants to have her cake and eat it too . Only reason a guy wants to be friends with a girl is to sleep with her and have control over who she dates .

My ex friend was like this with my ex gf . He didn’t like the fact i kept him out of her life . I do not allow exs around , mine or whoever im with . I do not allow friendships or contact of any kind .

He talked alota shit he couldn’t back up . His name is ethan , he has yet to step up . He did this because he wanted control over her life and i wasn’t about to let it take place .

I do not need to prove a god damn thing to any chicken shit free world civilian . When a woman is dating me she is MY woman and nobody is gonna change it .

Johnny, you don\’t realize it, but you\’re kinda saying the same thing I do. It\’s your woman, your rules because you *earned* that position. Until you came along, your woman\’s friend, regardless of his romantic/sexual notions, was doing his job and protecting his friend.

This is great. It’s so hard to maintain that spirit of innocence when you are in a hedonistic culture. If anything, we as humans react to the future based on our past experiences, whether good or bad. It’s unfortunate that some men, smart or naive, tend to make generalizations about girls of either divorced families or poor father-daughter relationships as “red flags” simply because such men had a distasteful or hurtful experience with a girl of such a background. Though, yes, there are many girls who refuse to be adults about relationship matters, there are many girls out there who, like the article states, will have their own point of view on what matters to them and have chosen to live life according to their own principles of what’s good, not founded on a denial of true and just good simply due to unproven or unwitnessed loving childhood experiences. Girls like these don’t need men who tempt them to see what damage they have the capacity to do, nobody needs anybody like that – any person in the world has the ability to do damage to another, but it’s in our hope as individuals to be as contagious with good as possible. We are imitative creatures; do unto others as you would like the world to be.