Archive for the ‘Michigan Wolverines’ Category

First let me start with saying there will be no update for Thursday since it will be Thanksgiving. I plan on spending the day rooting against the Cowboys and enjoying time with family and friends.

But you never know…I might break away and post something….maybe

Well the hottest rumor abound is that Tennessee is planning on announcing that Lane Kiffin will the new football coach on December 1st. If that is the case then I’m staking my claim right here, right now that from that day on out he shall be known as King Kiffin. ™ Ooh…look a trademark logo.

It is not know how Al Davis will react to the news. Let’s see…

If this picture came at me in 3D, I'd be spending the afternoon shopping for a new pair of pants.

Wow…I’m speechless. Speaking of Al Davis how would you like to him in 3-D? According to the Wall Street Journal, the NFL has announced that the Dec. 4 game between the Chargers and Raiders will be broadcast live in 3-D to theaters in Los Angeles, New York and Boston. The three screenings – for NFL and consumer electronics executives only – are a “preliminary step” toward what could be regular 3-D broadcasts throughout the NFL schedule.

Keeping with the NFL Newsday is reporting that the league is looking why Brandon Jacobs was inactive for the past game against Arizona. Zona’s complaint steams from the fact the Giants deactivated him hours before game-time on Sunday after he was listed as probable on Friday. Call it whining if you want, but the NFL requires teams to fill out an injury reports for a reason.

Tom Coughlin was not happy to be asked about this allegation either.

“I don’t know what you are trying to stir up or what you are trying to say, but we did everything the right way,” he said. “I really believed that he would play and then he felt like he wasn’t going to be able to contribute. So then we logged every issue every day. So there was no hidden … What was our mistake? Listing him as probable? We did think he was probable.”

Apparently the wife of the University of Tennessee President John Petersen is well either a bit caddy or just a bitch. I’m sure somehow this is all Fulmer’s fault. Is the picture a mug shot, I mean she does look somewhat unstable.

Another school is looking for a coach. The University of Washington is rumored to plan on going after Les “Big hat, little penis” Miles. Ummm….can we say “Not a chance in hell?”

This time of year always marks what is known as the college coaching carousel. It also marks the time when we realize that Terry Bowden jockeys himself into position to fail. This year might looks like he really wants the San Diego State job.

“I don’t know much about San DiegoState, but I am receptive to the right opportunity,” said Bowden, who has been working in broadcasting since last coaching in 1998. “I’d be glad to talk to people at San DiegoState if they would like to. I really would.”

You it’s not like he sounds desperate…OK I lied it is.

The University of Michigan finally get a much needed victory when official at the Detroit Zoo make a Buckeye piñata and feed to a wolverine. I’m sure Michigan fans are wondering why they couldn’t have thrown RichRod in there also.

If South Carolina ever plays Oregon State I’m sure I will get to write:

‘Cocks finally get a victory when officials at the Columbia, SC zoo throw a beaver into the ‘cocks enclosure, where the effigy was fucked to shreds. Poor delicious vagina. Thus inspired, South Carolina stormed out and lost to Oregon St 42-7.

Some people might remember Lenny Dykstra as outgoing. *Cough BS Cough* But at least he remains a classy figure in sports. Look at some of these quotes that Lenny had to say after he appeared in a Manhattan courtroom to fight over $139,000 owed to him by a Manhattan accounting firm.

“[They] folded like Mitch Williams in the ninth,” Dykstra said about the firm that sued him as he made reference to a former Phillie teammate who served the winning homer to the Blue Jays’ Joe Carter in the ’93 World Series. “There was no case. There was nothing.”

And

“That’s my f–in’ ashtray money, bro,” he told the New York Post, when asked about claims he owed a private jet company $7,000. “I don’t even know if I flew on their plane.”

Alright everyone, listen up. Here's my next big tip: If you bite of both ends, like so, it turns into a straw.

Let’s be honest. Yesterday offered a plethora of crappy games. On the bright side my beloved VOLS didn’t lose, of course they didn’t play but that’s not the point.

Clemson light Duke up. One more win and they’re bowl eligible.

Will Ron Zook be asked to step down after losing yet another game?

Look out Notre Dame is now bowl eligible even though Navy had a chance to win it in the end. Charles Weis really needs to look into doing some push-ups.

Georgia and the penalties they accrue almost cost them the game against Auburn.

Florida hammered South Carolina which is absolutely hilarious to me. Living in Columbia you should have heard all the things the Cock fans were saying. Deuce Staley actually said on his weekly radio talk show, “Carolina’s defense can match up with anyone’s speed in the country.” Really Deuce? You couldn’t tell from their performance yesterday.

I continuously laugh when I watch TV ads for other schools. And then a Florida ad comes on. “Go Gators. Go cure cancer.” Oh, that seems pretty simple. Tebow will take care of that in between circumcisions this off-season.

Does anyone really want to win the ACC?

Miami should be thanking Maryland for beating North Carolina.

Wisconsin discovered something called a forward pass and beat Minnesota with it.

Has anyone noticed that Nebraska is bowl eligible yet?

Missouri wins the Big 12 North…yes people that still exists.

Florida State couldn’t control penalties & Boston College’s running game at the same time.

It can be said: Vandy is bowl eligible. Kentucky might have been still mourning the humiliating loss the basketball received at the hands of VMI the night before.

Washington is still winless go figure.

Houston doesn’t have a problem as they rack up 70 points against Tulsa.

Thank God there’s more chaos in the polls this week and here is a newsflash: Tennessee sucks really sucks. I’ll have a complete write up on their game tomorrow after I review the tape today.

Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez will be home this holiday season because for the first time in 33 years the Michigan Wolverines will not be bowling. The last time that happened it was 1975.

Look for West Virginia to be ranked later today.

Central Michigan gets an upset victory over Indiana. Don’t worry Hoosier fans you have basketball season to look forward to. Oh wait no you don’t.

I feel your pain fan Wisconsin fans.

Minnesota gets upset by that smart Big 11 10 team known as Northwestern.

Miami is a dangerous team to play just ask Virginia.

Houston Nutt continues to impress as Ole Miss defeated Auburn.

Kansas opened a can of whip ass on K-State.

Arkansas gets an upset victory over Tulsa.

Way to go Pitt, you’re still relevant.

Miss State you’re not relevant.

Cal gets the upset win verses Oregon.

Georgia Tech continues to win.

Florida took revenge for the last year’s loss again Georgia & set themselves up to make a run.

It was the last game of Texas’s gauntlet but Texas Tech spoiled the party and remains undefeated. Now will Oklahoma be ranked above Texas Tech? That really wouldn’t be fair would it since they just defeated the team that handed Oklahoma their only loss of the season. This is why we need a playoff structure.

Duke was so close but yet so far away yesterday.

North Texas…what a week…12 players fail drug tests and yet they still managed a victory yesterday.

In case you been in the hospital or a Turkish prison over the weekend Lou Holtz made a rather harsh faux pas last Friday night on College Football Live. While discussing Michigan’s not so great start of the season Lispy Lou made a Hitler reference about Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez. Here is the quote:

“Ya know, Hitler was a great leader too.”

That’s not a good pep talk, Dr. Lou…

Mark “Lazy Eye” May was speechless and Rece Davis attempted to clarify what Holtz was saying by following up with “You mean he (Hitler) is a bad, leader, right?” Holtz said yes. Either way it was a rather uncomfortable situation even though Lou’s old enough to have recruited Hitler out of high school.

The following day (Saturday) ESPN wisely made Lispy Lou apologize on national TV on Gameday.

“Last night while trying to make a point about leadership, I made an unfortunate reference. It was a mistake and I sincerely apologize. At the time, I tried to clarify my remarks. I’m not sure I adequately did so.”

“I appreciate your understanding.”

I find it strange that when Page 2 columnist Jemele Hill referenced Hitler in one of her columns a few months ago, they promptly suspended her for a period of time.

Is it Racism? Sexism? Or, just spitting incoherent old guyism….

For years, Holtz has been flaunting his disregard for ESPN’s “Say It, Don’t Spray It” policy.

This was Mrs. Hill’s apology:

“I deeply regret the comment I made in a column Saturday. In expressing my passion for the NBA and my hometown of Detroit I showed very poor judgment in the words that I used. I pride myself on an understanding of, and appreciation for, diversity – and there is no excuse for the appalling lack of sensitivity in my comments. It in no way reflects the person I am. I apologize to all of my readers and I thank them for holding me accountable. This has been an important lesson for me and illustrates that, like many people, I still have a lot of growing and learning to do.”

For some reason I sincerely believe hers was more genuine than Lispy Lou’s apology.

The way ESPN quickly and fairly handled Hill’s faux pas sent a message to the world which was ESPN WILL NOT ALLOW HITLER REFERENCES.

For some odd reason they are taking a double standard stance when it comes to old men who spit while they talk. The suspension of Hill was aggressive and rather scolding.

This is how ESPN responded: “[S]he’s been relieved of her responsibilities for a period of time to reflect on the impact of her words….”

Yet we hear nothing of the sort concerning Holtz coming from the evil empire that is ESPN.

Maybe it’s because Holtz was born in West Virginia (where Rich Rod used to coach) and he is a legendary coach at Notre Dame which also hates Michigan that makes ESPN believe they can look the other way.

The double standard for Hitler references is most disturbing fact to come out of this. Granted Lisp Lou is senile. Compared to his analysis this is on the low end of gibberish to come out of his mouth. But still are we saying a white man can reference Hitler without being suspended and a black woman can’t?

Is that the message ESPN wants to send out?

Talk about an inconsistent application of the rules. Harold Reynolds is intrigued and would like to receive that newsletter.

Just chalk it up to his worsening dementia and move on. Until he accuses Mark May of being a parasitic space alien working for the CIA and blows him away with an elephant gun.

Either way ESPN is really going to have to bunker down and come up with a more consistent Hitler policy.

Ahh…another Saturday of college football has past us by. No real upsets to speak of however it was another great smorgasbord of games with some thrilling endings.

Don’t let the Tennessee score fool you. My complete wrap-up of that game will be tomorrow.

Everyone remember BYU? You know they’re the team with the unstoppable offense that was going to bust the BCS this year. Well TCU has something to say about that.

South Florida keeps in the mix of the Big Least by rolling over Syracuse.

Look out the smarty Northwestern team is now bowl eligible. They beat Purdue handily and this has to be Joe Tiller’s last season.

Maryland is like Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde of the ACC that or Wake Forest just wants to avoid a trip to Tampa and a chance to play in the ACC championship game.

Wow Rutgers actually won a game.

Georgia Tech upended Clemson. This was Dabo Swinney’s first game as interim head coach. I noticed that the AD was on the sidelines because he said something that obviously Swinney didn’t like.

If I was Swinney I would simply blame the AD at the post-game press conference.

“That play that got Korn injured, that was the AD’s call. The hook & ladder play it was the AD’s as well. I figured since he was on the sidelines interfering with my coaching he could call some of the plays”

Seriously folks the AD doesn’t belong on the sidelines. He should have been in the luxury suites entertaining the alumni.

Texas Tech manages to get the offense rolling and defeats Texas A&M.

Wisconsin once was ranked as high as #10 in the country, dropped their 3rd game in a row while taking a beating from Iowa.

California gets ranked the second time in the season just to get beaten again.

South Carolina fails to win a third game in a row. (Snicker)

Finally. My beloved Red Sox are still alive thanks to this fat-ass. Of course TBS has an epic fail due to technically difficulties.

“Two circuit breakers in our Atlanta transmission operations tripped causing the master router and its backup – which are necessary to transmit any incoming feed outbound – to shut down. This impacted our live feed from being distributed to any of the other networks in the Turner portfolio and caused the delay in our coverage. Both our primary and backup routers were impacted by this problem. We apologize to baseball fans for this mishap that caused a delay in our coverage.”

Everyone wanting to watch the game in the U.S. had to wade through about 20 minutes of a rerun of the Steve Harvey Show, and missed BJ Upton’s solo home run in the bottom of the first inning.

I’m no expert on TV transmission system design, but wouldn’t you think that your backup system would be isolated from your main system such that a circuit breaker going down wouldn’t take them both off line? Isn’t that, you know, the point of a backup system?

Way to go TBS…& where is the apology to those that might be upset about missing the last 10 minutes of the show? They might have wanted to see more wacky shenanigans.

So you thought because the gun sounded that marked the end of the Toledo/Michigan football game it would end there? Think again. Now the football teams are competing to see which school can rack up the most arrests.

If you think things are bad at Tennessee then you haven’t noticed the state of Blue and Maize at Michigan because it’s dire. See the photo above? That’s Cleveland wide receiver Braylon Edwards, funny…he’s wearing a Penn State shirt and yet he went to Michigan. Talk about a cold shot. Then again maybe he thought he was pledging support for the new Thundercats movie. At least it wasn’t a Toledo shirt.

Well things have started to get worse, at least for Rich “Dirty Sanchez” Rodriguez. According to the LA Times:

Steve Kampfer, a fourth-round pick of the Ducks in 2007, remains hospitalized in Ann Arbor, Mich., after he was attacked by a University of Michigan football player early Sunday morning.

Kampfer, 20-year-old defenseman on Michigan‘s hockey team, was thrown head first onto the sidewalk after he and a friend were confronted by a group of young men, university police said. A Ducks spokesman said that Kampfer suffered a fractured skull.

According to the witness, Kampfer and an unidentified friend were walking southward on Church Street when three unknown males caught up to them just past the intersection with Willard Street.

The man walking with Kampfer turned around as the group approached and said something the witness could not hear.

The witness said two of the men walked past Kampfer and his friend, shoving them aside, and then the third picked up Kampfer and slammed him into the sidewalk. Kampfer’s friend yelled at the group, but the men continued walking south on Church Street, the witness said.

He said Kampfer wasn’t moving and appeared to be unconscious after the attack.

The witness described the person who hit Kampfer as a short, athletically built blonde male. He said the attacker was accompanied by two other men with athletic builds and blonde hair. All three were wearing jeans and black shirts that read “Get Wet” in red or orange on the back, according to the eyewitness.

Mike Milano left, Steve Kampfer, right

According to University Police Lieutenant Robert Neumann the victim was picked up and “body-slammed” which is extremely sad in all honesty. I know losing to Toledo hurts…but damn, however it was the best tackle in Michigan all fall.

No word on the Atomic Leg Drop after the slam.

Mike Milano, a redshirt junior on the Michigan football team is the prime suspect.

First…the messy divorce from WVU, then the transfers, then the losing & finally Braylon Edwards showing up for an interview with Monday Night Football while wearing a Penn State shirt on, and now this?

LONG LIVE RICH ROD!!!

Granted Toledo might have gained an upset victory over Michigan last Saturday but their football players aren’t necessarily any smarter.

Take team captain Nick Moore & Albertson Alexandre for example. They decided to pull an all-night celebration only to get arrested outside of Ryno’s Bar & Gril on Sunday morning after a drunken fight.

Moore, a senior and team captain, and Jason Link of Columbus were involved in a fistfight at 2:30 a.m. Sunday in the establishment’s parking lot, according to police.

Alexandre, a junior from Miami, repeatedly approached the officers, ignoring numerous commands to leave the area, according to the report. After approaching an officer and tapping his firearm while trying to get his attention, Alexandre was taken into custody, according to police.

Talk about the smart thing to do…mess with the Po Po’s gun….brilliant. Next time just politely ask the officer to taser you in the nuts.

Wait…the Toledo paper is actually called The Blade…that’s disturbing. The Toledo Blade would make a fine addition to the Mystery Men.

They must really love their football in Toledo, to go this crazy after beating Western Michigan. Or was it Central Michigan?

Oh wait those teams have more talent than Michigan…my mistake.

So far Toledo is still leading Michigan except this time score is 2-0. Toledo

Chaos in the polls and I love it!!!! Yesterday was definitely the best slate of games this whole season and of course the best slate to surprising upsets.

Who is #1? It’s question that will be answered later today in the coaches poll and will be argued by everyone in the country.

I wonder who is feeling the heat more Tommy Bowden or Phillip Fulmer. Of course Tennessee lost because they suck no matter how hard I cheer for them. The full write up on the game verses Georgia will be tomorrow after I painstakingly watch a tape of the game later today.

Toledo’s record against Michigan improved to 1-0 yesterday which was a shocker.

I’m sure Arkansas is tanking Auburn for firing their offensive coordinator. You can the “inside” story of the firing right here.

Tim “TiVo the Teabag” Tebow can go back to circumcising kids now since Florida hands LSU an ugly loss. Hell Tennessee didn’t allow Florida to score that many points.

Penn St. makes an argument on why they should be considered #1. as they gave Wisconsin a second straight loss at Camp Randall.

The Texas Tech offense isn’t putting up the points it used to but manages to defeat Nebraska and avoid being upset.

USC rolled against a dead Arizona State team.

BYU won. Who cares?

What’s wrong with Ohio State’s offense? Sure they won but they only scored 16 at home.

I was one of the few people in my pick’em to pick Miss. State over Vandy. Bobby Johnson you just got Croomed!

Kansas proves that they are still a factor in the Big 12.

Everyone point and laugh at Notre Dame. OK that’s enough. I seriously wonder how much Charlie Weis weighs.

It took the G-Spot Stephen “I keyed a professor’s car” Garcia to allow South Carolina a victory or KY. Hey Brooks maybe they stole your plays as well…asshole.

Look out Virginia is 3-3.

Not only does Lou Holtz have a lisp, slobbers when he talks but he also looks like he has had a chemical peel that never healed.

Georgia Tech you barely defeated Gardner-Webb seriously WTF?

Show some love to Minnesota as they handed the Illinois Fighting Zookers a surprising loss at Illinois.

Wow Iowa actually won a game.

Dumb ass comment of the day goes to Lou Holtz when he mentioned comparing Colt McCoy’s stats to that of Vince Young’s the year Vince Young won the Heisman. The problem is Young never won the Heisman…what a dumb ass.

Way to go Red Sox! I’m currently pointing and laughing at Lisa Horne who is the worlds biggest Angels fan. J/K Lisa!

Chase Daniel and Warren Buffet are apparently BFFs 4-ever!! This is the most shocking thing to come out of the Missouri-Nebraska game other then the fact that they hung over “half a hundred” on the Cornhuskers before halftime.

One letter, short and to the point, stood out. “Dear Cubs,” it began. “Thanks for nothing.” Among the torn-up Cubs posters and T-shirts, another note read: “Dear Cubs 2008, It really hurts knowing I’ll never see you again. We had some great times.”

The shrine, at Waveland and Sheffield, was started by Murphy’s Bleachers workers upset at the Cubs getting drummed out of the playoffs. It grew as passersby added messages and trinkets.

I guess they shouldn’t have printed those World Series tickets up huh?

The Tennessee kicking game is back to full strength because Colquitt returns against Georgia. I hope he is sober and STAYS sober.

The lovely Penny Lane tells the world why it’s great to be a VOL!! This is one of the best posts I’ve read in a llllllooooooonnnnnnnnnggggggg time.

The miracle that occurred in the Miami-North Carolina game was amazing to watch.

Gee. Urban…is fourth down and one yard to go. You trail by one with time quickly ticking away. Why didn’t you try the 49 yard field goal? Was it arrogance? At least update the play book and run something other than a Tebow keeper. Great win for Ole Miss and the Rev. Nutt.

Fresno state continues to win and I love it.

I’m getting sick and damn tired of seeing that stupid Olive Garden commercial that they were over playing last year.

I hate F$U when I pick them to win, they let down. Win I pick to lose they win. Bastards!

First off I have great news. Joel has more than survived his epic bout with Hurricane Ike. Joel suffered no damage however he does not power, but him and his family are safe & dry. He would like to thank all the people that were praying for him.

His next bout will be with the government over the fleecing of gas that has occurred with this hurricane. Did you know that oil prices actually dropped last Friday? Of course not because they spiked to a staggering amount. These refineries only produce 25% of this nation’s gas, and some of that is exported. Nevertheless gas should only go up by 25%, big government should step in but never will.

Ok I just had to get that off my chest. That will be one of few times you’ll see something political on this blog…unless I find some hot photos of Sarah Palin. Is so wrong to lust after a female running for vice president?

South Florida decided to show some Big East pride by beating Kansas. This was a great game. The Kansas QB is awesome. It would be foolish of teams in the NFL not to draft him. I don’t care how tall he is. Think how good Doug Flutie could have been. Trust me there are a lot of NFL teams kicking themselves for not drafting him because of his height.

The Kansas QB reminds me of Vince Young except not as tall, stronger, more accurate, and not suicidal and he isn’t whiner.

Hyped games like the Nuts verses the Contraceptives suck. The SoCal-Ohio State was b-o-r-i-n-g. Let’s face it. Right now SoCal is that good. I don’t care if Beanie Wells didn’t play. The score wouldn’t have changed that much.

LSU did what LSU was supposed to do and beat a nobody team convincingly.

Does Auburn have an offense or is the defense of Miss. State that good?

The Tide continues to roll and they will be rolling next week as they play the worst SEC team in Arkansas. And even though the Texas-Arkansas was postponed, Texas would have crushed them.

East Carolina pulls out a squeaker and the R-E-S-P-E-C-T factor is falling with them as it is with Georgia Tech as well.

People better watch out for Ole Miss and Nebraska.

Everyone point and laugh at the PAC 10 this week. Sure USC rolled and Oregon pulled out a miracle but Arizona State lost to UNLV, UCLA got ass raped by the Mormons of BYU, Cal lost to Maryland….that right there deserves a LOL.

The ACC isn’t fairing any better as well with Virginia losing to UCONN big. Remember UCONN struggled against Temple last week.

Cutcliff is winning at Duke though. Way to go Coach!

Oh La La almost pulled off another epic upset against Illinois yesterday.

Penn State looks impressive I mean very impressive.

Oklahoma State continues to roll and roll big.

OMG Kentucky is undefeated.

Utah continues to roll. How important will the Utah-BYU game this year?

The Notre Dame defense looks good then again it was against Michigan. However Charlie Weis is more man than Tom Brady by electing not to have surgery on his busted up leg. Get better Coach I hate to pick on gimps.

I have a post coming up about the Tennessee game.

Did anyone notice how Herbstreit finally admits Mark Sanchez will probably be a Heisman finalist after side stepping the question?

Finally has anyone noticed how eerily similar that USC QB Mark Sanchez resembles Richard Ramirez AKA the serial killer known as the Night Stalker? (Insert scary music here)