Best Cities for Singles: Forbes' Wrongest List Ever

Aways handy with a dubious listicle, Forbes magazine is presenting us with its ranking of America's "Best Cities For Singles." Could Atlanta really be No. 1? Maybe! Dallas at No. 3? Perhaps! But there is no way in hell New York City should come in 8th place. Why? For the same reason this list ranks NYC as number one in the "Cool" category.

Cool people stink! Being in the same room with a cool person is enough to make a decent person vomit. Good God, have you ever tried dating one? And have you ever met any happy singles above the age of, say, 27 in Manhattan or Brooklyn (because we know they're not talking about any other boroughs when they do a list like this) who isn't quite fucking miserable?

Bosh, Forbes magazine! Bosh I say!

Also? Even if NYC does suck, Boston and San Francisco are a much, much worse. Whew. That is all. [Forbes]

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Yeah, I mean - there are some great things about Boston, but the dating scene? Is certainly not one of them. I love dating in New York. It's utterly impossible but it's really fucking fun if you can just get into the masochistic bent of it all!

Didn't Marie Claire recently pick Milwaukee as America's coolest city? These lists are all made by New Yorkers who know they can't pick New York as #1 for everything. Surely no one's leaving Manhattan for the greener pastures of Atlanta or Dallas.

@wholenuther: Well, metro Atlanta doubled in size between 1990 and 2000 (from 2 to 4 million, and the conventional wisdom says we're probably well over 5 million by now), so all of you assholes are coming from SOMEWHERE.

It always seems to me that there's a large group of New Yorkers that are BAFFLED that anyone chooses to leave (and sort of deny that it ever happens). Trust me, it does, and you all move here and exercise your new-found driving freedom all over our poor, unsuspecting freeways.

As a 20-something in Atlanta, it certainly doesn't suck here. The city's population is younger than average, there are lots of single people, most of them work decent-or-better-paying jobs and are well-educated. It's a very social culture in the better parts of the city.

Is it the best in the country? Dunno. Seems like faint praise, honestly, because I've got to believe that dating sorta sucks everywhere.

@pssshwhatever: Defensive are we? I simply said all these magazines come from NYC and need to look like they know something outside of it, ergo, these dumb charticles.

Assuming Atlanta's growth spurt is due to a New York exodus is quite stupid as well considering our population also continues to grow, and by most accounts, our influx is douchey too. City's are en vogue nationally. Don't be too impressed with your town's sudden leap to mediocrity.

While NYC gets plenty of "you assholes" with inflated senses of self, you no doubt draw a few New Yorkers who've realized their limitations and gone somewhere where they can be more competitive. For the most part though, you're probably drawing from neighbors like Florida and Alabama, which is nothing to brag about.

@wholenuther: While metro Atlanta's growth spurt isn't solely because of New Yorkers coming here - "growth" is really the region's primary industry, as we're one of the most sprawlish regions in the nation - they're the largest group of new residents in the region since 2000. The metro planning organization down here recently released stats determining as such.

@wholenuther: People - or at least, not all people - who leave NY for smaller cities like Atlanta haven't "realized their limitations." They leave because they've realized that most the so-called opportunities in New York go to the wealthy and well-connected. I say this as a native NYer from a lower middle class background who became acutely aware in my early 20s that in order to become successful and economically independent in my home state, I was going to have either suck a lot of dicks or become an unscrupulous asshole. I'm not saying it's impossible to eke out a living honestly in NYC, but the majority of people I know who've "made it" in NY have done so by meritriciousness, not merit.

I don't want to get into this. Lists are stupid and they're subjective and most of the time the person who put it together was some overworked drone (well, obvs) who did all of the research in a single afternoon aided by Google and his cubicle mate, to whom he repeated mumbled, "This is the stupidest story ever. I hate (name of editor-drone who assigned it)." It's totally not worth my time.

BUT! Cincinnati is No. 33? In the country? What exactly would be appealing for singles in Cincinnati? What exactly would be appealing for anyone in Cincinnati? Cincinnati is short-hand for "boring Midwestern berg where nothing of significance ever has or ever will happen."