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Monthly Archives: December 2008

We played with Run With the Kittens and Jay Spectre last night at the Horseshoe. I threw up this morning but remembered to rip the elf ears off my head before going to bed. My original act for mankind last night was to be an elf with a cold. I already had a cold so decided to build my performance around it. I brought my daughter’s Curious George waste basket and a box of Kleenex. I sang our set as a sick elf. Has anybody ever seen a sick elf before? Better yet: has anyone ever thought of a sick elf before? Lemme know.

Anyways, I think we we’re good cuz everybody bought me drinks after that. Jay Spectre were great musicians. I love the sound of horns and rock together. I didn’t like their show, though. I like edge and risk. They were just straight up roots rockers. However, plenty of people loved them. They got a better reception than we did. Proof is in the pudding.

Run With the Kittens were dressed in santa suits. They closed the night and rocked a packed Horseshoe. They share a large part of the blame as to why I was throwing up this morning. That was me, the elf drinking and sick pumping the air like a brother for 90 minutes, their whole set. When frontguy Nate Milk stated that it was time to elevate the sex appeal of the evening and peeled off his santa suit to reveal a matching two piece bikini, I elevated my drink on. He was starting to look good that Nate.

Later Nate told me he didn’t tell his band that he had a bikini under the santa suit and I know exactly why. When you’re a frontguy, your band sort of hates you in a very loving way. They shoot down your crazy ideas because they’re sick of them and a little sick of you, but they love it when you go ahead and do it anyway.

Once again: last night I dressed as an elf and blew my nose and threw my tissues into a waste basket on stage with my band, Dirty Penny. That’s a happy memory. I hope that flash gets magic trick status at the movie I go see in my afterlife.

So I’ve been talking about Run With the Kittens since I saw them by accident six months ago at the Cameron House. I just did a gig myself at The Horseshoe and my dick was swinging, breaking car windows on Queen St. I went into the Cameron for more dick swinging juice and there they were crammed on the tiny stage area of the Cameron’s front house. I was there with Carl Hamfelt and my lady, Lesley. After a few minutes I said to my friend Carl “They’re way better than us” and he replied “Stop, they are not.” A few more minutes went by and he said to me “Okay, they’re better than you.”

RWTK are a tight, telepathic multi-genre loving posse of four ugly clown boys that turn lead into gold, and then gold into milkshake. They do jazz, rock, disco, and meringue all in one song and make it look easy. They can tell a joke just with instruments. I’ve always admired musicians that can do that. Zappa’s stuff does that. You can just be sitting there listening to some horns, guitar, and drums and you’ll suddenly laugh like at the punchline… Well, I do.

Anyways, we played with them at the Starlight in Kitchener, Ontario. That’s an awesome place. Picture The Horseshoe on Queen but with really nice sofas, expensive lighting, same hi-fi sound and less urine smell. Also, a lovely newly finished huge dance floor with no less than 6 professional disco balls. The place seats about 100 comfortably, really comfortably. They mostly do DJ dance nights but will do bands once in a while that are touring nationally (which reminds me, I must ask my publicist how she landed that gig).

The next time me and my baby have nothing to do and no kids and a hundred bucks, we’re going there. And you should, too. It’s worth the 100 km drive.

Oh yeah, and the staff are nice and friendly. I nearly shit my pants when the bartender said “what can I get ya?” and smiled SINCERELY. Also chatted with door guy, manager, sound guy. No discernable attitude or ego. No need to wipe my face after. Going to Kitchener is great because you’re reminded how our cool metropolitan international city of Toronto sucks. The nickname ‘T-dot’ sucks, too.

And the final thing that makes Toronto suck more than Kitchener: nobody knew RWTK or Dirty Penny in Kitchener. We are complete unknowns. FIFTY COMPLETE STRANGERS CAME OUT TO SEE THE SHOW. I was beginning to think people didn’t like music anymore until I went to Kitchener.

Anyways, Dirty Penny and RWTK rocked the place. We gave a really good show. You could see it in everybody’s faces and when they came and talked to us after. This is no surprise since both bands were feeling awesome by the time we went on. The venue actually made us chips and dip AND gave us four beer tickets each.