Operation: Toddler Proof My Boyfriend

I keep telling him he doesn’t understand what it’s like to be the “Mom” me. He gets snippets. Quick bursts and usually my parents are there as well, taking up any slack cause that’s what they do.

So I proposed a weekend away with me, the little guy and J. We live a decent distance from Niagara falls so we trekked over to the US side. I booked a cute hotel that had a pool with a shark aquarium next to it and an adjoined Rainforest Cafe. We were in walking distance from the falls and an aquarium was down the road. We had plenty to do.

I decided to stop at the outlet mall first so I could have the little guy have a run around the Disney store. Funny. J and I were chasing him around and he picked out various items. then out of no where sets it all back where it belonged (AMAZING) and ran out. I was confused. But those stupid little rides in the mall caught his eye and he couldn’t help himself. He dragged us over and me, hating to deviate from a set plan, began to get agitated. I kept trying to get him to go back to the Disney store. But J said “let him ride the rides! We have no where to be right now. Lets just have fun” Fine. He was right. So we put some quarters and watched the little dude love the train, the race car and the roller coaster. Instead of going back to the Disney store we stopped to get lunch. On the way little guy and J spotted a kiosk selling splat balls. Both boys were enamored. J bought two and they were obsessed with those the entire trip.

After Lunch we trekked back to the Disney store and little guy picked out some sweet Star Wars toys. We checked into the hotel and relaxed until it was time for dinner. We went to the Rainforest Cafe and the little guy LOVED it. He got a kick out of the creepy animatronic elephants and even more of a kick out of the attached arcade. We went swimming after all the dinner arcade fun. And this is when I saw that my big grand plan to break J in was stupid. He didn’t need to be broken in. He will be fine.

I’m not big on pools. There is a legitimate reason I will write about soon. But I couldn’t swim long. So J stayed in the pool with him. They were so cute. Little guy was so good, and having the time of his little life. I sat in a chair by the pool, read a book and watched the two boys in the pool having a blast. My heart was so happy. I felt like such an ass for thinking he wouldn’t cut it.

But he did have ONE misstep. I call it “The Poopening”. Little dude totally crapped his pants. And it was pretty smelly. When you stay in a hotel room. It kinda just sticks there. So when I changed the diaper, suddenly J was quiet, he stopped complaining about the smell. I turned around and…

Oh yeah. That is my boyfriend in there. Hiding from the Poopocalypse known as the “The Poopening”.

Oh how lucky he is that the diaper days are getting closer to being over. But he is in for a treat.

It’s been a few weeks and I keep thinking about that weekend. It was wonderful to feel like a family. It eased me knowing I had a real partner. And to the untrained eye, we looked like we all belonged… because we do.