Author: thecatalystsforchange

I share information on various mental illnesses and disorders (scientific and social aspects) and sexual assault (particularly on campuses), as well as resources.
My goal is to bring awareness to these topics, and to de-stigmatize them.
Stand in solidarity against sexual assault, abuse, sexism, and stigmatization.
“Communicate. Even when it’s uncomfortable or uneasy. One of the best ways to heal, is simply getting everything out”.
“We blog because remaining silent is not an option” (CCASA)

My experience somewhat mirrors this woman’s. The onus is on the rape victim or survivor to immediately snap back and be whole. My rapist like her rapist will never be caught or punished but I will forever be judged.

Women who go through rape are expected to be shining examples of strength and fortitude. Nobody wants to to hear about the PTSD, Insomnia, nightmares, inability to form lasting relationships, repeated hospitalizations for depression and various mental ailments.

People only want the Happy Stories. Happy Endings. They walk away and reject you as Failure to Thrive in the face of adversity.

That’s why I stopped telling my story. For in the retelling I’m labeled a failure. Null and void.

However I ask that you read this Woman’s story of how rape can or does define your life. Her words resonate with me. She says what I’m unable to say.

our bodies
belong to
USnot to
the governmentnot to
the statenot to
the countrynot to
MEN
our bodies
are not goods to be
sold, traded, or owned
by OTHERS

women are
living, breathing
human beings
and we belong tono one
but ourselves
NO laws
can hold us
or control us
we are not
OTHER
women are
FREE BEINGS
free to live
our own lives
our own way
free to make our own
CHOICES
without input from men
men do not
own us
rule us or
have a say
in what we do
with OUR BODIES
women are not
PROPERTY
we are
intelligent
individuals
who get to
decide what
HAPPENS
to us

You are a rare child, my doctor says
and pinches the sensitive skin above my vulva
a walking swarm,
a lukewarm disaster,
a pair of
bloated cherry-coated lips
and tongue swollen from digesting prey

I grab a stud gun and nail him to the wall,
exposed
like a flying squirrel caught in a jump
Next day, he buries me carefully in his garden
I eat dirt and laugh,
making a home of my grave
I know, I know – you could never have foreseen
that even dormant and pretend-dead
I’d be twice your potency

But as sure as I’ll never forget
the wrong you’ve done me,
what’s more important is
you’ll never forget me,
and will never find me in another place.
This, I promise.

Such high expectations every day, and when not met the lapses are dreamt of in the night. Better to lick my lips in success than to fail. So pick up the pieces of failure and do better today.

My expectations are not too high. You can do this. You can care for your-self as if you matter and after a while you will feel it… not just try to.

Still residing is a wall between connecting with my body and feeling its workings, a frozenness. When thawed there is wholeness, but then the next moment not. The work continues; to remain open to all feelings, not run from them by icing, an unconscious response.

You will get there, and much has occurred to be present and feel safe. As one safe moment on top of another mounts, the risk taken to be here now seems worth it…

You are trying to get your life in order and it feels like you are carrying the world on your back.

Honey you are not alone.

No matter how hard you work, you will never be able to maximize your full potential until you lift your sisters up. Most of us fail to realize how much we actually need each other. Success is achieved when women come together.

Imagine how much we can achieve if we all encourage and support each other to reach our full potential.

I know some of you may not know where to start so I came up with 5 ways that you can uplift your sister.

Support: The best way to show someone that you care is by being there for them and supporting their dreams. If your friend has a performance you should be there sitting front row. If…

The Whisper and the Roar Collective is seeking submissions for an upcoming series on the global exploitation of women. We are accepting poetry, prose, fiction, personal narratives, and essays on these topics from around the globe. We are looking for writing that makes us feel, makes us think, that moves us.