>> 10.30.2012

Have you ever looked into your fridge and thought, there's definitely a life analogy going on in here. No? Well, I have. This morning. All fall I've been struggling with getting my life back "on-track". (Whatever that is.)

You see, during the summer I spent 60 days focused on my health...eating better & exercising MUCH more intensely than I have ever done before (for 60 min. a day)-- and all for ZERO pounds down and a few inches. I know, I know-- I should be happy with a few inches, right? But not even my jeans size went down! I've been stuck at this weight (212 to be exact) for the last year and a half trying desperately to see a different number more than just at 4 am, lol. (I mean really, even if you do see a smaller number at 4 am it doesn't even matter because you know after your workout, some water, and a bit to eat it'll just be back up there-- plus, it's 4 am so, I don't know about you, but "happiness" never happens at 4 am for me=)

So, every week I try to plan out a new menu...one that includes salads, kale, quinoa and sweet potatoes (for me) and one that includes all the wholegrain pasta, cheese, and "yummy" stuff for the other 5 in my family who won't touch the beginning listed items. Well, if you're a mom, you can easily understand that this lasts for all of your inspired 5 minutes and then goes down hill from there very fast. (As well as to waste because after prepping meals for the others you have no ambition to prep your healthy stuff for yourself.) I know what you're all saying. I should teach my family to eat the healthy stuff...and they do to some extent but because I didn't raise them on it it is taking longer than I'd like for them to eat it and enjoy. I AM making most foods from whole-foods and trying to keep out those "no-no" things such as GMOs and chemicals...but it's just plain tough to do and keep up with the rest of life at the same time-- at least for me.

So, I won't whine anymore but I'll get on with my point. I started last week trying to do something about this issue of discipline...because I know I lack it right now. (I was so discouraged after this summer's experience I've done a complete nose-dive in most other areas.) It's time to change...so when the ebook 21 Days to a More Disciplined Life a (review here) came along, though I wasn't looking for any miracle, I thought I'd get it (while it was $.99!) and just see what the author had to say. Ok. It's a good book...one woman's successful blogging journey to 21 days to discipline...but as she asks the reader in the beginning, I'm supposed to pick just ONE habit & project to start with. It can be as easy as putting my shoes in the right place every time I come into the house or as difficult as adding a consistent workout time back in everyday. Problem is, when I look at my life I can't find one good area...they are ALL out of sorts and none is "easy" to fix. Which is where my fridge comes into play...it's all out of sorts and I can't even find the left over baked oatmeal I was planning on having the last few mornings for breakfast! In order to do that, I'll need to get into the fridge and make a complete overhaul. Things will start to smell in there soon...and food is certainly rotting somewhere going to waste once again. So, this morning, you can bet you know what I'll be doing during my week of cancelled school-- cleaning out the fridge. But it will take more than a week to clean this life out, however...and really, I have to clean out 5 other lives too in order to make mine less cluttered... I'm not sure how to accomplish that. (I hear you all saying, "one step at a time"...) I know the answers, I've even successfully used those same answers before, but sometimes those answer don't feel sufficient...and like weight loss, in order to keep the momentum, you must first see some sort of tangible results and you need people surrounding you to spur you on.

Those people are the ones I am pleased to say I will be able to go visit in a few days...I'm hoping to return refreshed and upheld...the work will still be there and mine to do, but it will be easier because of the people who are upholding me. Thank you, Jesus, for true, Godly friends who have the courage to see you inside and out, speak truth in love, and support you through it all.