Sunday, February 1, 2009

Disclaimer: The following is "satire" and I do not actually support doing it - AT ALL!!

UNLESS, you are doing it to a large multinational pharmaceutical company, the FDA or AMA, etc...

Let's have some fun with our competition, shall we?

The last thing con men want is to have competition. So the most effective thing you can all do is publicize the truth, as you are able to twist it, about whoever you don't like competing with by linking to negative articles that you write using their name. That way, anybody searching for your competition on Google will be likely to find this article.

Here's how you do that: First write a really negative, hateful, violence inspiring article about your competition (make sure they are smaller than you). Then just copy and paste the HTML code below onto your website linking to your article (do not tip them off beforehand because you don't want them to be able to rectify any problems or prepare before you can put your plan into action - you are not here to help your competition!):

<a href="Place link to article here">"Put the name of your competition here" is a con man (or fraud, pirate, etc., whatever works to assassinate their character)</a>

Place that on your website or just link to this article using the name of your competition. If you have a really large mailing list or a highly visited web site you're all set. Just get all your followers to follow these instructions (they won't ask many questions if you've done your con right and convinced them you are a reincarnation of Mother Theresa).

The next thing you can do is to get your followers to start slamming your competition with emails and phone calls. Their contact information is usually listed in their domain registration records, although it's worth mentioning these could all be fake so you may end up hurting innocent people, but hey that's how it goes. In fact, the whole name of your competition might be fictitious. Most people will not look this up so it's best to give it to them in the negative article that you've written. That way, any old psycho on the internet can also get in on the fun.

Yes! Google can be fun in ways you didn't even realize.

You will also want to publish their personal home address if you can get it. This way there might even be some physical violence thrown in for good measure. At the least, your competition is likely to get get death threats from a few of your more mentally unstable followers (and being that you are a con man, you'll have a few - just always pretend you don't even think that). The best way to destroy people is to get them to do it to themselves or encourage someone else to do it so that your hands are clean in the end because you have plausible deniability.

If nothing else this will send a very strong message to anyone else thinking they might want to start messing in your claimed area of expertise and dare compete with you. We are not here to cooperate, we are here to compete!

Oh, it's a really good idea to follow this up with a few articles praising yourself and telling the world what an awesome humanitarian you are. You don't even have to pretend that someone else is writing them, your conned audience will believe whatever you have to say about yourself - no questions! After awhile your zombie followers won't even notice that you seem to be your own greatest fan and nobody else is writing about how great you are as much as you are yourself. Though, after awhile, the zombies will start following your lead and begin writing great things about you too. They can't help themselves. They follow. That's what they do.

BTW, Be sure that you make it very difficult for anyone to find or contact you. It's best, if you can do it, to have a home out of the country in case you need to suddenly flee for some reason. A third world country is best so that you can even create the illusion that you are traveling the globe helping the poor. You can even buy land cheap and then resell it for a HUGE profit to stupid gringos from America.

Life is good when you don't have to care about all people. Just yourself.

Disclaimer

ALL content on this site is informational in nature and is not to be taken as medically or scientifically proven (even if it actually is). The ideas and opinions of the owner and others are expressed throughout and are not offered as medical advice for the treatment or cure of any disease. No guarantees of effectiveness are offered. Please consult a licensed physician for any medical situation.