Things I'm Better at Than My Husband

I've always been better, but now even our 5yo is slowly eclipsing his shitty crayon work.

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Interacting with other humans

I've made him take the Aspergers test, he's not technically on the spectrum, but he's super relieved to have me in social situations.

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Finding things

This has to do with male spatial reasoning capabilities. He is blind while looking in the fridge. Blind while looking in closets. Something is really wrong with him. It's kind of scary.

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Drinking water.

Why is he so against it? I'm hydrated af all day every day.

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Self diagnosing/general health maintenance

HE WOULD RATHER MOAN AND WRITHE IN PAIN THAN TAKE APPROPRIATE MEDS OR GO TO THE DR. He's been known to take ONE (1) Advil to cure what seems to be a migraine.

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Whipping up a solid meal

He can make one element really well, but kinda ignores that anyone would enjoy a starch or veggie with their meal. I've got Italian grandma genes coursing through my veins. NO ONE LEAVES HUNGRY FROM MY TABLE.

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Logistics

I'm far from type A, but I make and execute killer plans. Home or afar, busy weekday or whirlwind trip: I'm your girl. I take the gold on this one.

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Remembering to bathe the kids & dog

Seriously everyone: if I die please please email him regularly to remind him to wash the other mammals in the house.

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Extended family maintenance.

I'm pretty much in charge of all bdays, socializing, holiday chatter.

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So much stuff. But too many bullet points, and it's not good juju.

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He knows I'm better at all that stuff...so maybe that makes him a better person?