EUSA changes name of nachos due to sexism

Edinburgh University Students Association (EUSA) has changed the name of two popular menu choices to ensure that they are no longer sexist. The Teviot ‘Daddy’ and ‘Mummy’ Nachos, mammoth feasts of Nacho Chips, melted cheese, salsa and sour cream were previously known for hospitalising unsuspecting Freshers and being the subject of complex pub bets. The Daddy Nachos were the meat option, complete with ground beef and chicken, whilst the Vegetarian ‘Mummy’ option included a selection of grilled vegetables.

Feminist campaigner Ursula Walcott-Hetherington argued that ‘The old names just reinforced traditional gender roles in the most unacceptable way.’ She campaigned EUSA for approximately two minutes before they changed the names.

Robin Thicke, who recently visited the University, was shocked and appalled at the naming choices for the Nachos. ‘I was hoping to enjoy some Mexican-themed snacks without the spectre of sexism darkening my day. But it was not to be. Even here, in a university in one of the world’s most enlightened cities, I have to endure this intolerance.’

The Daddy Nachos have been renamed the ‘Kristiva Nachos’ after Feminist Theorist Julia Kristeva, and her meaty theories. Meanwhile the Mummy Nachos have been renamed the Pankhurst Nachos, after Suffragette leader Emmeline Pankhurst, on the basis that the nutrition from the courgettes can keep you marching all day long for the vote.