McCain Courts the Critical Snookie Vote

You’ve been a Senator for Arizona since 1986 and you were just your party’s presidential nominee. You have high name recognition and are a military hero, yet you find yourself in a relatively tight race against a conservative talk show host who has long wanted to take you out. You’ll probably win, but you’re frightened by the rise of the Tea Party movement that is giving incumbents a judo-chop just as fierce as Austin Powers.

What do you do? You court the Snookie vote, stupid!

Here’s what went down. Snookie, the guidette from MTV’sThe Jersey Shore who has a reputation for getting punched in the face, is ready to fist-pump the crap out of President Obama’s face for placing a 10 percent tax on tanning beds. Snookie, ever the political activist, is now refusing to use the beds.

She says:

“McCain would never put a 10 percent tax on tanning, because he’s pale and he would probably want to be tan.”

McCain, a skin cancer survivor, replied Wednesday on Twitter, saying:

“u r right, I would never tax your tanning bed! Pres Obama’s tax/spend policy is quite The Situation. but I do rec wearing sunscreen!”

Yes, that’s right. Senator John McCain and Snookie have joined forces. It’s an inspiring story of cross-generational, cross-cultural friendship and American success—because nothing shows the potential that exists in America than when someone in their early 20s who thinks Canada was one of the original 13 colonies ends up making $7,500 per club appearance and $10,000 per reality show episode.

I live on the Jersey Shore, and go to some of the places seen in the show. I actually saw Angelina Pivarnick, the girl who made the very poor financial decision to leave the first season only a few weeks in, at a bar two weeks ago. And, for me, was a little extra assurance from God that I’m meant to be on the next season.