A blooper reel of the famous “whistle” scene from 1944’s To Have or Have Not; a mock-up of artsy film Memento using Mentos candy as “product placement;” cardboard cutouts of dinosaurs for a spoof of Jurassic Park, and even an in-person visit from the star of Robocop-sweded. These were only a few of the outrageous clips and delights attendees experienced during this year’s swede fest™ 3 palm beach, presented by Mainstreet at Midtown at the Borland Center for Performing Arts in Palm Beach Gardens. The 500 member audience in the sold-out theater chose a swede of the epic movie Noah as this year’s Audience Choice Award winner, with the prize of premium editing software for the winning director.

The "blooper reel" from "To Have & Have Not"

The shindig began with guests walking a red carpet for their group photo ops by John Sessa while being entertained by movie soundtrack cuts spun by DJ Hennessy. Attendees also enjoyed food from Oceana Coffee and tasty beverages from Potions n’ Motion. “Paparazzi” included filmmaker interviews from G-Star School of the Arts’ film team. Opening to an original score by Jon Lamboy, this year’s swede fest™ 3 palm beach showcased more than 30 entries running in the lobby and the main theater. Main sponsor JFK Medical Center handed out branded “Swedish Fish” chocolate bars and trail mix at their “concessions” table to continue the night’s theme. Emcees from the Palm Beach Shakespeare Festival kicked the event off with their own swede of the movie that started it all: Be Kind, Rewind, then offered Tinsel Town-themed improv between each block of laugh-out-loud remakes. Following the awards announcement, attendees and filmmakers headed over to the after-party at Midtown’s Cantina Laredo.

The opening credits for "Mementos"

Noah creators Max Shteiman, Justin Wisnicki, and Maeve A’hearn, who all attend Oxbridge Academy, used local settings and basic effects combined with tongue-in-cheek humor to win over the crowd. Close runner up, Chris Notarnicola, utilized hand-made signage, tin foil over cabinets in a home kitchen, and toy dinosaurs to recreate the 3-minute take on the 20-year-old hit film, Jurassic Park. In the spirit of swede fest, additional medals were given for:

BEST USE OF A LAZY DOG: InsidiousMOST ABUNDANT USE OF HEINZ KETCHUP: Swe7enBEST LOOKING SHORTS WE’VE EVER SEEN ON AN ACTOR: Rocky 3GREATEST AMOUNT OF PROPS WE’VE EVER SEEN IN A SWEDE: Goonies

Clever girl...you do know your "Jurassic Park" dialogue, right?

“Every year gets better,” says RAM Real Estate Marketing Manager, Belle Forino, who is the creator and organizer of the event. “What I enjoy the most are the filmmakers’ imaginations. Everyone has a different take on how a scene can be recreated. The vibe of the event itself is simply fantastic. Everyone is here to have a fun time, and having it be all-ages is really special.”

Based on the movie Be Kind, Rewind, in which the hapless owners of a video store have to re-create their own Hollywood hits, which they called ‘swedes,’ swede film festivals have become a phenomenon, with even non-filmmakers enjoying the novelty of using “found objects” to represent special effects and details from their favorite films.

So, without further ado, here is the evening’s lineup:

ACT 1

1. Jurassic Park by Christopher Notarnicola
2. Insidious by Elliot Skogman
3. To Have & Have Not by Wally Lurz
4. The Big Lebowski by Brenden Stefano

We were overwhelmed by the number of submissions we received! In order to accommodate them all we screened some of the entries in the theater lobby:

Frozen by SouthTech AcademyHer by Brian SlusserSoul Plane by SouthTech AcademySpider-man by Jovany PoncedeleonThe Matrix by SouthTech AcademyThe Ring Sweded by Juan DiazToy Story by Allison EngelkeGodzilla by The Benjamin SchoolHow to Swede Your Dragon by The Benjamin SchoolHarry Potter & The Chamber Of Swedes by The Benjamin SchoolPercy Jackson by The Benjamin School

SWEDE FEST™ PALM BEACH 3, in case you haven’t noticed, is this Saturday, August 2, 2014. We’ve had some great coverage in the media, which we’ve posted to the SFPB Facebook page: the Sun-Sentinel, Boca Raton Magazine, Florida Weekly — just in the last few days. We’re telling you, it’s going to be quite the hoot.

Assuming you haven’t already rushed out and bought your tickets, we must mention that a sellout is imminent, so better get it in gear. Buy your tickets right here, right now.

So, the final roster of swedes goes like this — in no particular order, so do not assume anything about which will play in the theatre, and which will entertain you in the lobby…

Our evening’s emcees are the Palm Beach Shakespeare Festival’s improv performers Wally Lurz, Krys Parker, Trent Stephens and Zach Myers, who will “swede the swede” with their own version of the movie that started it all: Be Kind, Rewind, as well as amusing interactions with the audience (with no swears or other inappropriate references, to the relief of parents everywhere).

Many thanks to Gainsville’s Mr. Tom Petty for the lyric we stole to make that kinda trite headline.

A still from Jacek Gancarz's swede "Mementos", NOT starring Guy Pearce, Carrie-Anne Moss, and Joe Pantoliano

So, the swedes are in. Lots o’ swedes. Lots of good, lots of bad, lots in between. We’re doing our jobs going through all of the footage; have you done yours?

Because your only job, at this point, is to buy your tickets. Oh, and VIP tickets are all sold out. None left. Nada. Nein. Non. Just General Admission advance tickets for $8 bucks. And we highly recommend you buy them online and in advance. IF (and that’s a big if, people) we have any left the night of the show, they will be $9, cash only.

And do you really want to get all snazzied up, drive to Palm Beach Gardens, stand in line with your crumpled Abe and four Washingtons, only to find out YOU CAN’T COME IN?? The walk of shame back to your car will be sort of embarrassing.

You’ll be missing out on the potent bevvies from Potions in Motion, music by DJ Sean Hennessey, the big screen in the lobby looping the swedes that didn’t make the finals, and our fab step-and-repeat with photographer John Sessa, who will capture you in all your cinematic drag..

We still need some volunteers, for you intrepid souls who like to be helpful, get in free, and hang out with the cool folks who organize this madness. Email Belle Forino at bforino@ramrealestate.com if you’re feeling all interested.

Details, details…

swede fest™palm beach 3

Saturday, August 2, 2014

The Borland Center for Performing Arts on Mainstreet at Midtown, 4801 PGA Boulevard

Doors open at 5:30 PM so you can pick up your WILL CALL tickets and enjoy the lobby ambiance

VIP ticket holders enter the theater at 6:25 PM

GA ticket holders enter the theater at 6:40 PM

Festival starts at 7:00 PM

Theater doors close at 7:05 PM

Once you enter the theater, you will pick up a program, voting card, and pencil, then find your seat. Due to the sell-out crowd, please do not leave gaps in the rows. We’ll ask you to scoot over as the theater fills up, and all the heavy sighing is unnecessary. We’re one big sweding family.

As always, swede fest™palm beach 3 is brought to you by Mainstreet at Midtown, because they’re just cool that way.

Do you hate us now that we’ve earwormed you with that fabulous song by Survivor? Because it immediately sprang into the collective consciousness here at swede fest™ palm beach 3 HQ, and it’s not pretty. But it was inevitable when we watched the Rocky III submission that just arrived. And for your viewing pleasure, we include a still from the swede, and one of the original promotional posters. Heh.

Tickets. They’re selling. Get yours soon, people. We give one free to every filmmaker who submits, you know that everyone related to that sweder and all his/her friends then buys a ticket, so where does that leave you? Possibly waiting in line the night of the event with a handful of crumpled dollar bills hoping for the best? We sold out the

Rocky III, for reals

last two years, and there’s no reason to think this year will be any different. Do you really want to be in your car, checking Facebook or Twitter to see the updates on whether there are any tickets left (this being done by your responsible passenger, of course, and not you), only to turn around and go home? Bummer of a Saturday night.

And to those of you who may be thinking it’s too late to swede: nope. Not so. You still have 13 days (provided you start today) to call dibs and roll film. You’re only producing 3 minutes (or less) of PG-13 comedy goodness (even if your source material is so very not). The deadline to get your swede to us is 11:59 PM on Wednesday, July 9th. Rules? Read ‘em here.

Event Details — because we’re oh so thorough (and maybe a tad OCD about these things)..

Ben Crandell at the Sun-Sentinel did a nice piece on swede fest™ palm beach 3 in his Go Guide column on the SouthFlorida.com website today — and it will be IN PRINT tomorrow. Which makes it, like, totally legit.

Go read it now, then share it with all your friends. You know you want to.

The 45 films submitted to date promise to make this year’s event the greatest festival of all time in Palm Beach County!*

* (out of all other Palm Beach County festivals celebrating bad movies by good people)

Festival planners at Mainstreet at Midtown promise that this year’s swede fest™ palm beach 3 will be the biggest, baddest, and worst (in the best way) film festival in its long, nearly two-year history. Based upon the films submitted so far, they are proving themselvescorrect, with 45 three-minute spoofs of Hollywood hits reserved so far for the cult-favorite evening scheduled for Saturday, August 2, 2014 at the Borland Center for Performing Arts.

The all-ages film festival has been a sold-out, blockbuster hit each year, and Mainstreet at Midtown is promising to be sold out even more for this year’s “three-quel.” That in mind, tickets will go on sale June 11 on this very website, with advance purchase tickets for $8 and VIP seats for $11. VIP tickets include a nifty lanyard, along with reserved seating in the theater’s front rows. Doors open at 6:00 p.m. with food and drink available for purchase and music provided by Double-Shot Entertainment. Showtime starts at 7:00 p.m. and audiences vote for their favorite “bad” movie. The winner of swede fest™ palm beach 3 will receive a year’s subscription to Adobe Premiere Pro CC film editing software (a $250 value). Following the awards, everyone is invited to Cantina Laredo for the swede fest after party.

Emcees for the evening will be the Palm Beach Shakespeare Festival’s comedic performers Wally Lurz, Darryl Willis, Krys Parker, Trent Stephens, and Zach Myers, who are crafting their own “fun with film” for the entertainment of the audience.

But what is a “swede?” the uninitiated ask. Based on the movie Be Kind, Rewind, a “swede” is a no-budget, laughably bad remake of a Hollywood film which spawned an underground sweding craze and resulted in the first swede fest™ in Fresno, Calif. Next came swede fest™ Tampa Bay, then swede fest™ palm beach in 2012. Those interested in swedeing a film are encouraged to use “found items” as props and their own imaginations.

Those who want to take part in the coolest film festival in existence are encouraged to claim their film title now. All films are due by 11:59PM on July 9. “Sweders” receive one free ticket per movie submitted and are encouraged to dress “Hollywood bizarre” when attending the event. Because why not, right?

Swede fest™ palm beach 3, sponsored by Emergency Care Services at JFK Medical Center, rolls out the red carpet on Saturday, August 2, 2014 at the Borland Center of Performing Arts at Midtown in Palm Beach Gardens at 7:00 p.m. Tickets are $8 in advance, $9 at the door, and $11 VIP with Limited Edition Lanyard and VIP seating. Sponsorships and volunteer positions are now available for this must-see event. For advance tickets, sponsorship opportunities, rules and regulations on submitting a film, or more information about the festival, take a look around on this website — it’s all here!

For general information, or to get in on the groovy sponsorship opportunities, call Mainstreet at Midtown’s Marketing Manager, Belle Forino 561.282.4623 or email bforino@ramrealestate.com

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