A very Brady felony
The press release from the Suffolk County DA’s Office about the arrest of Boston College . . . er, make that former Boston College defensive linemen Brady Smith read as follows:

“Evidence suggests that Smith entered the 21-year-old victim’s residence shortly after 4 am on April 19. Smith allegedly proceeded to her bedroom, where he sexually assaulted her as she slept, then fled when she awoke and screamed.”

Smith is a big dude (6-2, 285 pounds) with a ’70s mustache who got trashed this past week and hit on a girl — the roommate of an ex-girlfriend — at the Kells, in Allston. The girl refused his advances, but Smith was increasingly beered up and, apparently, couldn’t believe he was being rejected. Eventually the girl had to leave the bar because, reportedly, Smith wouldn’t leave her alone.

Unfortunately, the story didn’t end there. Around 4 am, Smith entered her apartment through a sliding door — first going into the room of his ex-girlfriend. When he found her brother in there, he went on to the other girl’s room. She awoke to find him “standing over me in inappropriate ways,” and subsequently it hit home that “it was Brady Smith and I realized that his hand was down my pants.” She screamed for him to “get the fuck out” of her apartment, waking up her roommate, who called police. Cops later found Smith drunk and stupid in a parking lot. He was arraigned on rape charges and dismissed from the BC football team.

BC isn’t traditionally a high-arrest environment, though it has had its share of head cases, with former star running back William Green perhaps its most noteworthy. A pair of picks from this past weekend’s NFL draft, lineman Gosder Cherilus (17th overall) and defensive back DeJuan Tribble (6th rounder), were arrested this past year in a scuffle at the Greatest Bar. Running back A.J. Brooks was also busted for assault and battery with a dangerous weapon — the dangerous weapon being his shoe — after he allegedly kicked a campus residential advisor this past fall.

Attempted rape is no joke, particularly a premeditated home-invasion-type sex assault. Give Smith the big 89, shooting him near the top of the list.

I drink, I get drunk, I fall down
Not that we’re bitter or anything, but we in Patriot land always make time to report the arrest of a current or former Indianapolis Colt. Donald Strickland now dons the colors of the sad-sack San Francisco 49ers, but he’ll forever be an enemy in our eyes.

On April 13 cops spotted him being held back on the street by a bunch of guys who apparently thought he was going to get in a fight. Cops then approached Strickland and were going to arrest him on the spurious charge of being drunk in public, but being an NFL cornerback with NFL cornerback speed, Strickland took off. Being smashed, he didn’t get far. Strickland fell down after about half a block, then got up and took off again. He was taken into custody and slapped with whatever charges were handy, including resisting arrest and public intoxication.

LET GO, METS | August 18, 2010 As difficult as this summer has been for those of us counted among the Red Sox faithful, let's all agree: it would be a hell of a lot worse to be a New York Mets fan right now.