Oh, yeah, butt munch? There's a party in your pants and everybody's coming? Well there's a party on my back and...and...everybody's getting free refills of beer and margaritas while I carry this hot ass beverage dispenser backpack around!

Suck it, summer heat! Even if it's hotter than balls out you'll be too drunk to notice thanks to this triple threat of 3-1/2-quart drink dispensers turned into a backpack. The 3 clear tubular containers have siphon dispensers and the entire contraption is fitted with adjustable padded shoulder straps. And no, they didn't forget the Red Solo cup holder. Check out the mesh bag strapped to the side.

A stormtrooper who's packing nothing but Jameson and a Buttery Nipple is my kind of stormtrooper. I bet in whiskey decanter and suspended glass forms they're even a decent shot. At least until round 7 or 8 when your own...

Now this is the kind of Yule Log I'm talking about. How better to bring good tidings to you and all of your kin than with a nice bottle of Jameson or Jack chug-a-lugging out the tap on an urban harvested Ohio hardwood...

What's scarier than this freak parade of masks on Halloween night? The head-splitting, toilet-hugging hangover we're all going to have Sunday morning. Especially with 1) Daylight Saving Time ending at 2 a.m., giving everyone...

The Vapshot Mini Home System is a countertop liquor vaporizer. It looks kinda like an air pump at the gas station. It acts kinda like one too. Except instead of pumping on a hose to inflate your Goodyears, you'll suck...

Items like the 10-gallon whiskey still and this stainless steel alcohol / moonshine still prove that making booze at home can be fun and worthwhile even when liquor is legal! According to TableTop Still, their DIY spirits...

Some call it the can that won WWII. Even though the Germans created the Wehrmacht-Einheitskanister, American and British forces quickly copied the design and used it for the efficient storage and safe transport of fuel...

I don't care how they got this ship in the bottle as long as I know how to get the booze it's sailing through out. A wood base handcrafted in Kentucky serves as a classy pedestal to the mounted glass whiskey decanter...

As I mentioned during my show-and-tell of the Black & Tan tool, I prefer whiskey to beer. Lots and lots of whiskey. Four gallons ought to do it. So someone pass me a 10-gallon whiskey still, a bag of distiller's yeast...

I call shotgun! Wha--what the F Scott Fitzgerald, Cornelius?! You just sprayed me in the eye with...what is that, a...juicy fr--...no, a buttery nipple? You just squirted a buttery nipple at my face?! That's...that's...well...

I'm not sure the skull in this decanter is so much a phantom as it is a piece of glass blown inside a bottle. But you don't have to tell your kids that when you warn them about what Skully McSkullface will do to their...