Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

ou can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks. I’ll open this thread every morning at 10am.

Rave: My health. Still thankful that things are doing well in that department.

Rave: A night with the girls watching the Superbowl and eating delectable goodies.

Rant: Anyone else feel they have two different life paths going for them? I am happy living close to my boyfriend, friends and family. I am also thankful to have a good job in the area. However, I feel that I have a different calling. I am a huge instincts person and I still feel the need to move to New York — ‘sacrificing’ my proximity to my friends, family and boyfriend. However, this has been a teenage dream of mine (I’m now 26) and the dream/passion for moving to the Big Apple still stands. So, again it’s a question of “Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?” My job’s HQ is in New York — and it just seems like at this point next year, what’s the point of sticking around DC?

I hear you. I definitely have the urge to get out of DC too and try different places. At some point in my life, I want to live in London (although not for several years as I don’t think I would take my dog with me).

To answer you based on my own experience, I will tell you that the older you get, the harder it is to make a change. While there will be some brave souls that say it is easy to make significant changes once you’re in your 30s and beyond, I find that it really is harder the longer you wait. It’s the same whether it is about a job, or finding a new group of people to be around, or anything else. It definitely won’t be any easier to move up there if you get engaged or create even stronger ties to your friends and community here. I know it sounds cliche, but take chances while you can, because in a few years, you could be looking back and thinking, damn, I should have done ___.

Do you have concrete reasons for wanting to move to NY? I ask because I’ve known a lot of people — the grass-is-always-greener kind — who swear that once they move their life will be better, more exciting, more fulfilling, etc. I would listen to this voice more if you wanted to move from a small midwestern town for example, but DC to NY isn’t going to give you too many more cultural, career, or other opportunities. Sure there is more art and cheaper food, but it’s just as hard to meet people, you see much less of the sun, and it’s more expensive.

I used to swear that I was going to live in europe by the time I was 30, but once I stopped dating a perpetually dissatisfied child, I woke up and made the effort to do new things here and meet new people, and lo and behold my life became infinitely better. Sure, I still want to travel, but the answer to my boredom wasn’t in some other city, it was inside me.

I say do it. I had a serious girlfriend when I was 26. I stuck around for her. For many reasons, none of which were her fault, she is not my wife today. BFs and GFs come and go. If it is the real deal you will find a way to make it work. If it isn’t then you didn’t compromise for the wrong reason.

As a former inmate, er, resident of NYC, I think it’s a place to live in when you’re young. It’s easier to deal with the stress of living in the city when you’re in your 20s, partly because your standards are so much lower: you are probably okay with having roommates, living in a dinky apartment, calling three blades of grass a park, the constant noise, and you’re still strong enough to schlep your crap all over town. If you want to move to NY, just do it and get it out of your system.

Think of a calling as a stronger impulse than an instinct. If you had a calling, you’d have to answer it. Is it a calling, or something less — a self image, a whim, an urge among many. In the meantime, your ties aren’t what’s holding you here, you are. It’s alright to act on lesser impulses, but I think you’re blaming others for staying here.

The ball is in your court to balance desires and decide how you will relate to those people here. It’s on you. I say this as someone who married the partner I was with at 26, and traveled from place to place, including NYC, sometimes following, sometimes leading, and sometimes acting together.

I’d just like to echo others’ sentiments here. Change is always harder than sticking with what you know. But most, if not all, of the time, making deliberate change to your life ends up being worth it. You have to pursue things you want!

A good way to ease yourself into something big like a move to another city is to plan as much as possible before making the decision. Figure out how difficult it would be to move your job to NY, what neighborhood you’d want to live in (and look at apartments on craigslist), etc, so that way you know what you’re getting into. This will also give you something to get excited for. And moving from DC to NY is not so far that you won’t be able to keep up ties with family and friends.

GO! I moved 2700 miles away from DC (to Tacoma, WA) which had been a dream of mine for a couple of years in October. I could not be happier. Its hard being away from my family but we skype, talk on the phone and visit whenever possible (I went home for thanksgiving and christmas and my parents are coming in a couple of weeks). I’m also 26 and I knew it’d be a lot easier to make this dream come true now then if I had waited and that I’d rather haved moved out here and hated it and come back then not move and regret it for ever.

Short answer I’m hoping eventually get a job at Ft. Lewis. Longer answer its where I got a job, the cost of living is lower (same sized apartment as I had in DC 1/3 the cost), proximety to friends, liking the feel of the area etc.

Rant: My new boss is the micromanaging type and it is driving me crazy. She also doesn’t read my emails clearly, because she’ll respond with questions that have already been answered in the previous email. What’s the point of sending an email if the recipiant won’t even read the whole thing?

Rave: My parents are getting on in their years (that is not a rave), and they have decided that they want to take me on a vacation to anywhere I’d like as a sort of a last-major-family-vacation-last-hurrah type of thing. So I am really trying to think of somewhere I’d like to go with them. Dad doesn’t do cruises and mom can’t walk very far. Otherwise, the choices are wide open. Any recommendations? (They are mid-60s, yet most people think that they seem like they are in their mid- to late-50s for reference.)

And one more detail- past family vacations have been to Hawaii (twice), Vegas (a few times), and we went to Disney World a million times when I was growing up (yet still almost feel like I’d like to go back, and I don’t care if that makes me sound like a 5-year-old). We’ve also done the UK.

I’ve always wanted to go with my mom to her hometown (in Germany) and walk around with her, listen to stories of her childhood. Sadly, she’s in her 80s and not thrilled about long plane rides anymore. Is there a place that’s special for your family – the place your parents met, the area your family is originally from – where you could both vacation and talk about old times? That would be super special.

Are they city or countryside type of people?
If city people, picking one place, renting an apartment in the best neighborhood and just spending the vacation “becomming locals” like visiting all the restaurants, markets, museums, neighborhood bars, etc. might be a nice way to see and fall in a love with a location and city. Pick a place with great day trip locations.
It could be anywhere- Chicago, Prague, Mexico City, Paris, Vancouver, Bermuda…

if they are only mid-60s why is this the last hurrah? there should be many more! my parents are late 60s… my dad doesn’t care to travel, but my mom is begging me to go everywhere with her including 22 days in south america.

It’ll be more of the last vacation for the three of us. My mom is declining in health, we live so far away from each other, and frankly, all of us really have to budget time even to get together for a few days at once. I haven’t been able to go on a trip with them for about 10 years, so we’re thinking that we’re trying to make this a big vacation, and probably the last one like it.

Glacier National Park. There are luxury lodges and motels, great views from the roads, and you could do some rugged day hiking on your own. Easy to fly to, as well, and you could make it a 4/5 day trip, not an epic journey

Can you get around without too much walking, though? My parents still have a few good years of walking around left, but my wife’s unfortunately can’t walk much more than a block or two. I feel like this pretty much limits our vacation options to Florida.

Go out west to the Grand Canyon (North rim=smaller crowds) and Brice Canyon. There are plenty of small trails to walk if you want to move around and tons of scenic driving routes for those who don’t want to walk.

I did a 3 week driving tour from Louisiana to California with my parents and it was awesome! I can tell you great restaurants to eat at in Tuscan an Fort Stockton Texas if you go further afield than the Grand Canyon.

I did the pacific coast highway drive from LA to San Francisco with my mom. I think we spent 5 days all together. All those little towns along the coast are super cute and not much walking – Santa Barbara, Saint Luis Obispo (sp?), etc.

Southern France is a great trip and not extremely expensive, I’m talking about Provence (Aix-en-Provence, Avignon, Marseille and Toulon) and Languedoc (Montpellier, Sete, etc). These regions sit on the Mediterranean, the beaches are great, food is amazing, and many vineyards around. The above mentioned cities, except for Marseille (I’ve never been but hear that its a great cultural city), are small and extremely managable. I’ve been to Paris many times and have lived there, but for me these southern regions are the best. You get beach life and city.

My Husband and I just took a trip last Spring with my parents, Father 79 Mother 67. We went to a few cities in Europe and it worked out great. The larger cities have the hop-on-hop-off tours, which are really great for ppl who can’t walk everywhere. The tours go to the main sites and you can get off and walk around it you want. Maybe not exiciting enough for younger ppl, but my parents appreciated not having to walk everywhere as they tire out easier than we do. The buses also have the tours in English on the headphones. We also did a day-trip per city to see the countryside a bit. Beware with travel times, older people need more time between trains and reserved seats are very helpful (can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to stand on trains throughout Europe- hours long!). I think you can do pretty much anything, but keep in mind they will be a bit slower than you. Something to keep in mind, too, is eating. My Dad (almost 80 and as most ppl his age takes a ton of different pills) has a limited diet and certain hours where he must eat and may not eat, due to medications. Your parents are younger so they may not have those issues, but something to keep in mind in their advancing years while traveling. Have a great time with them, we really enjoyed our trip with my parents and are hoping to go somewhere again in the near future.

Rant: Worked everyday the past two weeks- too much work!
Rant: Husband has had to work everyday the past month!! UGH… It’d be nice to catch a break.
Rave: Mom and one of my close friends are visiting this week and I’ll hopefully be taking a half-day on Wednesday to hang!
Rave: Not a Pats or a Giants fan but that was a fun game to watch last night!!
Rave: Olympics! I just realized they’re this summer. They are so much fun to watch!!

Thanks for the concern! He’s a salaried employee (so yea, it’s legal) and just has too much work – so most nights and every weekend he’s been working since New Years! At least he doesn’t have to be at the office but it still sucks.

Rant: Madonna’s halftime show. At 53, she’s still got it. I challenge any 21 year-old out there to replicate that routine – doubt you could.Hands down the best halftime show I’ve ever seen. Of course singling live would’ve been better, but I’m not certain that would’ve been possible with all the dancing. I gove the performance a 9/10.

rant: when i get in, i open my email and am bombarded with corporate catch phrases. who thinks it’s normal to use “i’ll circle back with you” — “i can pass the baton once we talk” — and “let’s debrief” all in one email?

well, it doesn’t help that the email came from the biggest d-bag i work with. so everything he does annoys the crap out of me. he could say – i’m bringing you a puppy and a sack of cash – and i’d still want to punch him.

Rave: I love my apartment!
Rave 2: It’s Monday and I don’t feel sucky.
Rant: I’ve hit the 7 month period in my job. A little bit too early to start applying for a new position but I see some great opportunities right now.

Rant: Feeling very gloomy this morning. Dissatisfied with my job, had a fight with my boyfriend, and I feel like I’m at a dead end.

Rave: I’ve lost 7 pounds since the beginning of the year. I ate veggie chips and vegetables and hummus dip last night despite being tempted by various dips and meats. Did cheat and have a little bit of the queso.

Congrats, ew!! That’s awesome. As for yesterday, don’t sweat the queso. You didn’t cheat you treated yourself on a special occasion – you deserve that every once in awhile. Besides, I’m sure you’re already back on track. Keep up the great work.

Rave: My folks were here this weekend to spend time with their grandson! He loved it and they loved it!

Rave: Was out on a walk with them on Saturday and headed over to Annie’s Ace Hardware to show them the mural and the progress and met Annie outside. She invited us in for a sneak peek. She was so friendly and the place looks great! Can’t wait for this to open!!!!

Rave: Between the Ace, Three Little Pigs, and Billy Simpson’s all opening in the next few weeks our neighborhood just keeps getting better and better!!!

Rant: People that barely escape an armed carjacking and chase down said armed carjackers. Just beyond stupid. Way to put everyone else in danger. You are very lucky they didn’t let off an AK while on you were chasing them Rambo.

Seriously, I can’t even fathom it. So 3 cars just boxed me in and a couple dudes put a gun to my head, I got away with my life so let me go chase these dudes. What on earth could you have done if you caught them, got your iphone back and scolded them? WTF?

Rant: Car tire sprung a leak as soon as I got home Friday (better Friday than earlier in the week, I guess) and was flat as a pancake within half an hour. Had to spend my Saturday morning taking it in to get fixed.

Rant: Was supposed to pick up a winter delivery from Truck Patch Farms Saturday morning (their bacon is addictive) but couldn’t due to taking my car in.
Rave: Boyfriend picked it up for me.

Rant: Wanted to bake something new and exciting on Saturday but felt too lazy after getting my car fixed so I just fell back on an easy favorite.
Rave: Brown butter blondies with walnuts and cocoa nibs.

Rant: Had to work yesterday.
Rant: Lost my thermos (which I keep full of water and carry around with me all the time).

Rave: Made a tasty black bean soup for dinner yesterday and have leftovers for lunch today!

Rant: Wanted to catch up on sleep this weekend but wasn’t able to (see my earlier rants).

Rave: Pulled pork in the making in my slow cooker at home at this very moment (with a pork shoulder from the aforementioned Truck Patch Farms winter delivery).

Rant: All my raves are food related.
Rave: At least there’s food in my life to get excited about.

Rant: Some random jerk ran over one of our favorite family cousins with his pickup truck, she was a sweet soul, Irene, and it was a hit and run. She didn’t survive. This happens 2 days after our aunt passes away. What a week.

Revel: My cousin hooked me up with free airline ticket so I could fly to Texas to be with family for the funerals.

Rant: My agency requires us to bill 92 hours of productivity a month. We get a free reprieve for the first 2 months and then it starts counting. Today my time starts counting and every single one of my clients canceled/rescheduled.

Rave: I have a good book to read and some stuff to catch up on in my personal life.

Rave: put in a job application I had been wanting to put in for years.
Rant: unlikely to ever get that job. probably just pie in the sky.
Rant: i have been wishing and trying to turn my career around to what I want to focus on – foreign affairs – but I just can’t seem to find a way to make it happen.
Rant: I don’t have enough work in my present job and really feel like all that potential I once imagined I had is being wasted. But I could just coast the rest of my work career in this job and always be home on time for my wife, kids, home and garden.
Rant: just as I start to clarify for myself what I really want to do professionally, my conscience starts to climb into my brain and ask me to take a radical leap to spend my limited time on this Earth trying to help my fellow man, even though what that could possibly mean as an actual job is totally unclear or how it would contribute to my feeding my family.
Rant: I just can’t reconcile all of this and my mind keeps finding excuses to not think about it. I can’t move, I can’t drop salary, I need to leave my current job, I need to save the world, I need to save my soul, I need to spend time with my family, I need to do something valuable with my life. Ugh. This just keeps gnawing at me.
Rave: at least I’m aware of what I should focus on.

Rant: People not caring enough to call 911. Friday night in Mt Pleasant, the trash can at Mt Pleasant Ave and Kenyon was on fire. There were significant amounts of smoke billowing from it. Folks outside the Raven, including the doorman, and people on the street were just amused or ignoring it. It’s not really that f*cking hard, nor is there any downside. I called, it took <3 minutes of my time and the Fire Dept responded.

Rant: People not caring enough to call 911. Friday night in Mt Pleasant, the trash can at Mt Pleasant Ave and Kenyon was on fire. There were significant amounts of smoke billowing from it. Folks outside the Raven, including the doorman, and people on the street were just amused or ignoring it. It’s not really that f*cking hard, nor is there any downside. I called, it took <3 minutes of my time and the Fire Dept responded.

The fire was burning when I walked outside. What I wanted was for the people who had been watching it burn to have shown some initiative (maybe take a little responsibility for what’s happening in the community) and called. Better they get a couple calls than none.