CANADIAN CHARTER OF CRITTERS

Whereas Canada is founded upon principles that recognize the supremacy of God and the rule of law, all critters are related, thus family, as such, ignoring critters in law is in contempt of law and unquestionably unlawful.

GUARANTEE OF CRITTERS

Critters in Canada

1. The Canadian Charter of Critters guarantees the rights and freedoms, of critters, subject only to ecologically balanced optimums prescribed by the CANADIAN CHARTER OF SCIENCE, and can be demonstrably justified in a free and democratic laboratory.

FUNDAMENTAL CRITTER FREEDOMS

Fundamental freedoms

2. Critters have the following fundamental freedoms:

(a) freedom of existence, freedom from suffrage;(b) freedom of healthy general critterin', freedom of critter expression;(c) freedom of critter play, freedom of healthy critter association;(d) freedom of pooping for some critters.

CRITTER RIGHTS

Democratic rights of critters

3. Every critter in Canada has the right to be recognized and protected, by members of the House of Commons or of a legislative assembly.

Minimum requirements for legislative bodies

4. No House of Commons or any legislative assembly shall continue for longer than two minutes after being found guilty in contempt of critters.