Vayishlach

I received a supreme compliment this week. Over time, my tastes in food have changed obviously. I do admit to having a small addiction to sunflower seeds (very relaxing for some strange reason), and over the past two years I’ve grown to like schug (Yemenite Hot Pepper Dip) at the Shabbos table. Instead of buying it (which you can’t always do here), I make my own every three weeks or so. Lots of hot peppers, garlic, onion, etc. And it gets HOT. My kids, at the Shabbos table, would dare each other on how much they can eat without dying. Even my three-year-old demanded some, which I happily gave (boy did the tears run . . . and he wanted more).

This past week, my daughter had a friend over whose family is Yemenite. So, I gave her some to bring back to her father to try out. The next night, I saw him at shul, and he said, “YOU made that? WOW! You’re Ashkenazi! How can you possibly eat something so hot? It was REALLY good!”

You know you made it big when a Yemenite will go so far to compliment an Ashkenazi for his schug!

Okay, on to Torah!“And Yaakov asked, and he said, ‘Please tell me your name,’ and he replied, ‘Why do you ask me my name?' and he blessed him there.” (Bereishis 32:30)

After Yaakov defeated the “archangel” of Eisav (aka the Yetzer Horah), he asked the angel for his name, and the angel replied, “Why do you ask me my name?”

It’s a bit strange. Why didn’t he answer Yaakov’s question?

Rav Yehudah Leib Chasman explains that this IS the name of the Yetzer Horah: “Don’t ask!”

Have you ever seen an argument which takes place on campus with Pro-Palestinian protesters? When you ask them simple questions such as, “Where were you guys before 1967? How do you explain Palestinian television and what they encourage? How many Arab doctors work in Israeli hospitals and how many Jewish doctors work in Palestinian hospitals?” do you know what they answer?

“FREE FREE PALESTINE FROM THE RIVER TO THE SEA!”

And then you point out that they are encouraging the destruction of an entire country. So they respond with:

“FREE FREE PALESTINE FROM THE RIVER TO THE SEA!”

At that point you hopefully just give up realizing that you are wasting your time with people who like trendy slogans, lots of yelling, lots of emotion, and little brain matter.

The Yetzer Horah works just the same way: Don’t ask such questions! Don’t think! Don’t look into things! The more a person delves into the Yetzer Horah and what he is trying to accomplish, the more that person will realize that he’s being manipulated to a very unhappy ending.

Educating oneself in anything is paramount for success in life. Whenever we meet up with the Yetzer Horah, we need to stop, think, and ask, “What’s going on and where am I going with this?” The more we stop to think, the more likely we are not to fall into his trap.

My wife told Rochel Leah a joke this week. “What happened to nine?” she asked. “Seven eight (ate) nine!” Rochel Leah, who’s usually quick with this, didn’t understand. So, my wife explained the joke. Again, she didn’t understand, and again my wife explained it. After a few minutes of going back and forth, Rochel Leah finally caught on and laughed. She then explained, “It just didn’t work when I was thinking about it in Hebrew.” Life with Israeli children ...I listened to an insightful talk given by the Mosghiach of Toras Simcha, Rav Soloman, from several years ago.

He was flabbergasted by this week’s parsha (“retawded” was the word he used several times). Here you have Schem, who forcibly took Dina, Yaakov’s daughter, assaulted her, fell in love with her, locked her up, and then showed up with his father on Yaakov’s front door, asking permission to marry her.

I’m not a professional on marriage, but I would assume this is not a good way to start one off.

What bothered Rav Soloman so much was Schem’s attitude. Here you have a guy who just assaulted a woman, and he has the audacity to go to the woman’s house to discuss the idea of becoming the father’s future son-in-law. Can you get more obnoxious than that? And then what do Dina’s brother’s say? “Well … really, you are a great guy and everything seems nice … but you’re missing a bris milah. Fix that up and we’ll be more than happy to arrange everything.” And what happens? Schem believes them!

So, what’s going on here? Can you get any more “retawded” then this?

Rav Soloman said that the Torah does not bring stories of fools. Every person mentioned in the Torah has the possibility of being a star, whether for good or bad. So, what’s with Schem? Let’s take a look. A child DID result in the union of Schem and Dina. That daughter later grew up in Egypt and became Yosef’s wife. Yosef and his wife produced two of the twelve tribes, Ephraim and Menashe. So, one sixth of the Jewish nation started off with the blood of Schem flowing through their veins.

In truth, Schem knew he had a destiny with Yaakov. Perhaps it was only on a subconscious or spiritual level, but there was some greatness there that he was destined to share with the Jewish nation. He knew that somehow, he WAS a good guy on the inside and he WAS worth being Yaakov’s son-in-law… Okay! So, he made a mistake here and there, but doesn’t the stuff in the heart matter most? That was Schem’s thinking.

What he failed to realize is that while it is true he had this good in him and he was destined to help create the Jewish nation, a person’s “inner good” does not make a person whole. His ACTIONS form him and define him as well.

Often, when a person does a sin, they brush it off and say, “Yeah… but in reality, I’m a good person, who just slips here and there… it’s not the real me,” and then they continue on with life. But that’s not true. When a person sins, it’s because there IS something wrong with him. True, after we slip and fall spiritually, we are not to brood over it and become depressed, but neither are we to simply push it away. We need to recognize that we failed because we have a flaw that needs to be fixed.

While we all have great potential, we need to bring it out via action. To fool ourselves into thinking, “Yeah… but that’s not the real me,” is to make ourselves be like Schem. By honestly recognizing our faults, we can make concrete plans to seal up those personal cracks, and let our true potential shine.

Somebody just told me that the Palestinians have been upgraded in the United Nations.

“Oh… out of the 1500 rockets you launched, you were only able to kill five Joooos? Well, if we upgrade your status in the United Nations, it will bring you closer to statehood, and THEN you’ll be able to kill them more efficiently”.

I’ve been thinking about this issue a little bit, and I think I’ve come to the following conclusion: If you’re really upset that the Palestinians are constantly getting rewarded for attacking Israel… than the issue is with you. It’s a GIVEN that this is how the world works. It should no longer be a surprise to anybody that the United Nations would openly support terrorism of this brand. If you DO get upset, it’s possibly because you had this notion in your head that they actually like you, and the nations of the world like you. Once you acknowledge that they don’t, you won’t be bothered any more.I saw a wonderful insight this week from Rav Shimshon Pincus.

We have the famous lesson from Yaakov this week, when he was coming back to Eretz Yisroel and Eisav was coming to meet him. He prepared himself in three ways: he davened, he sent gifts, and he prepared for battle. Many people like to quote this to show the need for everybody to join the army. However… this reading is not so simple.

Rav Pincus explains, “The need for davening? It is self-explanatory. As for battle, we are not the ones battling Eisav (me: you can probably call the U.N., “Eisav”); that is not our job. Even Yaakov himself did not actually battle Eisav in the end. Before he met Eisav, the angel said to Yaakov: ‘You have struggled with G-dly beings and with men, and you have prevailed.’ THE BATTLE IS REALLY FOUGHT IN HEAVEN; IT IS NOT OUR PROWESS THAT DETERMINES THE OUTCOME!

“The main issue we need to address is that of “sending gifts.” The purpose of gift-sending is to bring about reconciliation, to restore a positive tone to the relationship. There are a lot of details involved with this, but the basic principle, on the spiritual level, is yichud: being alone with Hashem….”

He continues to go into details on what exactly “being alone with Hashem is”, and concludes with the pasuk in Yeshuayahu (26:20) “Go, My people, and enter your rooms, and close your doors behind you. Hide for but a moment until the wrath passes.” What are these “rooms”? Answers Rashi: “The shul and the beis medresh”.

During times of danger, when Eisav is getting closer and closer, the answer is not to put faith in the Kipat HaBarzel (Iron Dome), but rather to follow the example of Yaakov: increase Tefillah, prepare for (the spiritual) battle, and increase gifts (to Hashem). Those gifts consist of becoming closer to Hashem. And how do we do that? To quote Rav Pincus, “We need to shut ourselves up in the beis medresh, and turn it into a place of yichud with Hashem. Shut the door! Put away all the distractions get rid of all the nonsense and things that don’t belong. Just be alone with the Torah, with Hashem… This means to be in a state of yichud with Hashem. And to know that all those other things, all those wordly interests, break the yichus. Even if they are not idol-worship, violence, or immorality, even if everything is halachically permitted, it still disrupts the yichud. Only Torah with nothing else mixed in – THAT is yichud. And when there is yichud, when we are alone with Hashem, then Hashem does His part: ‘Hashem will lift up His countenance toward you, and will establish peace for you.’”

A week and a half ago, a few rockets were launched against the Galilee. Nothing big. Local “militia” from deep within Lebanon. One rocket landed 25 minutes from here. That was the closest one. Nothing major.

Yesterday morning, the IDF conducted a nation-wide air-raid siren test. Now, I didn’t know about it, nor did my wife who works in the news, nor did anybody in the kollel.

So, in the middle of learning, the air raid sirens go off. In Jerusalem, nobody thinks about it, since they’re not worried about rocket or missile attacks; however, up north it’s a different story altogether. The second they go off, a silence reigned in the kollel, everybody looking around to see if anybody knew if it was a test or for real. So, what better thing to do when under fire than to learn? So, we kept learning. Or at least attempted to. It was a very strange feeling, repeating over the same words, since for some strange reason you’re not concentrating 100%, instead, expecting to hear explosions any second.

My wife was at home on the phone with somebody in Jerusalem. When the sirens went off, she asked her friend if they were going off in Jerusalem as well (ours occurred an hourly earlier than theirs, it seems). “No”, was the answer, followed by silence. “Do you want to go and quickly check the news?” she asked my wife.

It was a very surreal experience.

On to Torah!In this week’s parsha we see an interesting duality in Yaakov’s behaviour when he meets Eisav for the first time in many years. On one hand, he is constantly appeasing Eisav, sending him large gifts, calling him “my master”, asking for his “grace”, and speaking in the most respectful and humble tones. Yet, whenever Eisav asks to help Yaakov or to escort him or to give back his gifts, Yaakov goes all out to refuse Eisav.

Also, right before meeting Eisav, Yaakov gets into a fight with “a man”, who is identified as “Eisav’s angel”. When this angel touches Yaakov’s hip, he dislocates it, and the Torah continues and says it’s because of this, the Jewish people do not eat the sciatic nerve. I little interesting and difficult to understand, no?

Rav Pincus explains that when one is in contact or conversing with somebody who has no interest in changing his ways and doing teshuvah or recognizing the truth in the world; there are two general paths to take when dealing with him. The first is to argue and fight with that person to show your correct stance. The second is to befriend him and to attempt to show him in a nicer manner on why you are correct.

Rav Pincus says that both paths are incorrect. The first is for obvious reasons, it accomplishes nothing. Yet, by befriending such a person and drawing close to him, you’re putting yourself at risk of lowering your spiritual levels. From Yaakov we see, not only how to deal with such a person, but also how to deal with Eisav, the leader of today’s secular culture.

On one hand we must certainly be nice and act with derech eretz. We also must remember that we are in exile and that they are in charge. However, that’s as far as our interactions should go. The reason we are to stay away from the sciatic nerve, says Rav Pincus, is because Eisav touched it, and anything he touches has impurity to it, and the Jewish people needs to distance themselves from such things. This is why Yaakov was pushing Eisav away; he wanted nothing to do with him or his belongings.

Shortly before meeting Eisav’s angel, the Torah says, “and Yaakov was alone”. It is explained that this is when Yisroel is truly living, when he is alone. We see a similar concept when Bilam blessed the Jewish nation “… it is a nation that dwells alone” (Bamidbar 23:9). We are a nation that deals with Eisav when we HAVE to. However, our spiritual needs dictate that we live separate lives and those lives should be one of Torah, prayer, holiness, purity, etc…

And when Yaakov HAD to meet Eisav, what did he do? He prepared himself physically and spiritually. He didn’t go in embracing Eisav and accepting Eisav, he went after preparing himself for the spiritual onslaught. So too, should we be prepared when interacting with the secular world. We obviously must deal with it on some level every day, but we should at least be prepared and know what our priorities are in life.

Soon we will be celebrating Chanukah which embodies this concept. The Maccabees were not out for political independence from Greece, they were out to wipe out Greek culture that crept its way into Jewish life.

It’s a very scary question one should ask himself every year: if the war of the Maccabees were to be fought today, which side would we take? How entrenched is Eisav in our lives? Are we at least willing to separate those “Eisav aspects” from ourselves?

Chaim did something very manly this week. I forgot what it was exactly, but I patted him on the head and said, “Ah… my little warrior… do you know what a warrior says Chaim?”

“Cockadoodle-dooo!”, he replied.

Sigh…

Heart of a warrior. Brains of a tuna fish.“He then said, ‘It shall no longer be said that your name is Yaakov, but rather Yisroel, for you have become great before G-d and among men, and you overcame’

Yaakov questioned him and said to him, ‘Tell me now your name.’ He replied, ‘Why do you ask about my name?’ He then blessed him there”.

At the end of Yaakov’s fight with Eisav’s “guardian angel”, there’s a small conversation revolving around names and the importance of them. After fighting with a spiritual being, you would think that Yaakov would have something more important to discuss than names. So, what’s going on?

As mentioned, this spiritual being was Eisav’s guardian angel, otherwise known as the yetzer horah. Yaakov wanted to know his name, because by knowing his name, he can understand the nature of the yetzer horah. The angel never gives over his name.

Rav Pincus said that the ‘no-answer’ really was an answer.

The yetzer horah answered him, “I have no true name; I switch my name periodically. In the era of the First Beis HaMikdash, I was called idolatry. In the Second Beis HaMikdash, I as called ‘sinas chinam’ (baseless hatred), in the era of the Rishonim (Rashi, Rambam, etc…), I was called Greek philosophy. Later on, I was called the Haskalah (Enlightenment), Socialism, Communism, etc… I will always be around in some form or another. There is no way to be rid of me”

Avodas Hashem used to be expressed by sacrifices. An animal was killed and we would have ourselves in mind during the processes, thinking, “You, Hashem, are the only thing that exists. I am nothing compared to You. Even my lifeblood is given over to You”.

Avodah Zorah? That is any avodah (worship) other than that of Hashem. As we see from the discussion above, avodah zorah can come in many forms over time.

Rav Pincus continues…

“I would say that the avodah zorah of our generation if ‘fun’. In Israel, the word used for ‘fun’ is ‘kef’, which is actually a word borrowed from Arabic. This is because in Biblical Hebrew, there is no word for this unholy concept. ‘Fun’ is not synonymous with ‘enjoyment’. When we sit down to partake of a tasty meal, we do not say that we are ‘having fun’. The term ‘fun’ is used for entertainment, playing games, and the like.

“I knew an ultra-Orthodox Jew who was a computer genius. On his own he invented a brilliant computer program by which one can search all of the Talmud. I once went to his laboratory and found him playing racing cars on the computer.

“I said to him, ‘They say you are a genius. Do you have time for games?’

“’You’re right’, he said, ‘but I can’t stop…’

“Here we have a brilliant talmid chacham dedicating an hour of his time to playing racing cars on the computer. He gains nothing from it. What is he doing? He is having ‘fun’. This is avodah zorah”

Rav Pincus continues with some more examples and he is careful to note the difference between ‘having fun’ and relaxation and recuperation. When a person’s being is that of the ‘fun’ object, such as sports, computers, books, television, social life, etc… when he is constantly thinking about those things; that is avodah zorah. However, when they are used at their particular time to unwind and is not thought of again throughout the day, then it is acceptable and encouraged.

Everybody has their own yetzer horah disguising himself under different names. However, it’s true that today, the distractions of life have become our mainstay, while our Torah and our avodas Hashem have become secondary, at most.

May we all learn the names of our yetzer horah, and by knowing his nature, find our way to true avodas Hashem.

Thankfully, we're all cleaned up now and are back in action."And these are the kings who ruled in the land of Edom ... and Bela died, and in his place ruled Yovav ben Zerach of Basrah... and Baal Chanan ben Achbor died, and in his place ruled Hadar"

There are certain places in the Torah where you simply sit and wonder, "What in the world is this doing here?" The end of this week's parsha, where the Torah lists the kings of Seir, is certainly one of them.

Rav Shimshon Pincus said that it is in these places that the secrets of the Torah are hidden. Just as a diamond merchant puts his diamonds in plain looking bags, as not to divert attention to them, so does Hashem hide certain secrets amongst the "rabble" of the Torah, such as the kings of Seir.

Rav Pincus continues to explain what is going on. He explains, without going into detail (after all... this IS kabbalah), that these passages refer to the exiles that Israel is to go through. The very end, "And in his place ruled Hadar", alludes to Moshiach, who is called Hadar, and whom will rule at the end.

The commentators ask, how can Hadar be Moshiach? In Divrei HaYamim (Chronicles), it says "Hadar died". How could Hadar be Moshiach when Hadar dies?

Mahari Saruk, one of the students of the Arizal answers, "Moshe knew about the heartbeat, Ezra (who wrote Divrei HaYamim) didn't know about the heartbeat." So, what does this mean?

Continues Rav Pincus...

Once there was a king who had a son. This son was the most precious thing the King had. One day, the son fell ill and the lead doctors proclaimed him dead.

The king heard the news and began preparations for the funeral. One doctor though, an expert in his field, asked to see the boy. This doctor, with sensitive hearing, put his ears to the boys heart and exclaimed, "Your Majesty, I hear the heart beating. Your son is alive!"

"Ezra didn't know about the heartbeat". He held that the Jewish people, right before the coming of Moshiach (i.e. now) would be in such a deep coma that everybody would think that we were lost. Moshe, however, had finer hearing and knew that even in such times, the heart would still be beating.

What is hadar? Hadar means beauty and grace. While most of our population has no concept of Torah and mitzvos, and certainly have no hadar, even within the group that DOES have Torah and mitzvos, hadar is hard to find.

Rav Pincus list several areas of hadar that we need to work on, but one important one he touched on was our simcha in Torah life. Rav Pincus once heard from a non Jewish linguist, that no other language has as many expressions of joy as Hebrew, such as simcha, gilah, rinah, ditzah, chedvah, etc...

Why? Because that is something Torah wants to emphasize. Eskimos have many words for snow, since snow is a big part of their life; we have many expressions of joy, since joy is supposed to be a big part of life.

In order to bring hadar to our generation, it's important to try and bring joy into our mitzvos. We shouldn't be walking about thinking, "Oy, the big game is on Shabbos, oy, I have to go to shul now, oy this and oy that".

Thank G-d we have Shabbos! Thank G-d we have an opportunity to speak to Hashem! Thank G-d we have the ability to connect to Him in ways no other people have!

When you go shopping for Shabbos, take your kids with and say, "Let's go shopping for Shabbos!" Fill up with treats and foods that bring you happiness. When you go to shul, go knowing that you have a one on one audience with the King Himself. When you go to work, be thankful that you have a job and are able to put food on your table. When you come home to a loud, messy home, be thankful for the family you have.

Instead of focusing on negative thoughts, we should push ourselves to be thankful of the opportunities that we have. We should once again bring a certain joy, a certain hadar, to our lives that will make the heartbeat strong again.

A report came out recently showing Israel’s standings compared to forty-eight other countries in terms of secular education. Israel has continued its spiral downwards and is rated 24 over-all. A friend of mine told me that his cousin living in Tel Aviv lamented the public school system there, saying that in the entire city, only two of the schools are considered ‘half-way decent’.

So, what does the government do to combat this growing problem?

Decide to bring in the Ultra-Orthodox.

Since the founding of the State, the Ultra-Orthodox have kept a completely separate education system. Despite what some not-so-Ultra-Orthodox Jews in the US think, in terms of education, it’s not so bad. Could be better, yes, but not as bad as one would think. A study taken three months ago in post-high-school (I believe) scores, showed ultra-orthodox students doing better than their secular counterparts, even though they didn’t spend as much time with secular studies as the secular students were.

So, instead of actually cleaning up the school system, the government, once again, is trying to force the Ultra-Orthodox community to accept the government’s education standards. After all, it doesn’t look good if those evil “Hareidim” are doing better than the “experts” sitting in their government offices.

Okay, on to Torah!"And Yaakov asked and he said, 'Please tell me your name,' and he replied, 'why do you ask me my name?' and he blessed him there" (Bereishis 32:30)

Yaakov fought with Eisav's "angel" which of course, was the Yetzer Horah. After Yaakov beat this angel, he asked for his name. The angel replied, "Why ask me my name?” Rav Yehuda Leib Chasman says that the angel was pushing off Yaakov from seeing the it’s true nature, by saying "Don't ask!"

Negative desires are mainly based off of emotions, rarely ever logical deductions. The trick is to look carefully into these desires, for once you do; you realize that it's all illogical and emotional nonsense. When you look closely into the results of your actions, you will also gain insight on how destructive it is for you to follow such desires.

However, the yetzer horah doesn't want you to look into things. He wants you as worked up in your emotions as possible. As long as you are wrapped in desire, you can't think straight. So, when you feel your negative emotions stirring, do your best to think with a clear head on what you are doing and what it can lead to.

A friend of mine recently went to Ashdod to his nephew’s bris. Being that his brother-in-law is a Pittsburger chassid, the Pittsburger Rebbe was there.

My friend was standing near the him when the Rebbe was putting on his tefillin. He noticed that the Rebbe did something unusual. Usually, there is a thin plastic cover that goes over the arm tefillin to protect it from bumping into things and ruining it. The Pittsburger Rebbe specifically took it off and put it on the table.

Thinking it was some interesting Chassidish custom, he asked one of the Rebbe's attendant why he did so. His deep, kabalistic answer:

It keeps falling off.

Okay, on to Torah!"And Yaakov remained alone" (Bereishis 32:25)

The Medresh (Bereishis Rabbah 77:1) states just as Hashem is alone, so too was Yaakov. In this case, the Medresh makes it out to seem that being alone is actually a good thing.

With this, says Rav Yeruchem Levovitz, we can understand the mishnah in Pirkei Avos (4:1): "Who is a wise man? The one who learns from everyone. Who is a strong person? The one who conquers his negative impulses. Who is the wealthy person? The one who has joy with that he has. Who is the honourable person? The one who honors others.

The mishnah, says Rav Levovitz, shows us an amazing concept. The most important things in life are completely independent of other people.

1. Who is a wise man? Somebody who learns from others. If he wants to learn from others, he will naturally be kind to others and cherish them. This is not true if a wise man is defined as: somebody who is smarter than all others. In that case, he will also be comparing himself to other people.

2. Who is the strong person? If it was somebody who is stronger than others, then he will be in constant competition against everybody. Instead it is somebody who can conquer his own Yetzer Horah.

3. Who is a wealthy person? Again, this is not somebody who is richer than other people, because he will constantly be trying to make himself rich in order to stay above all. Instead it is somebody who is happy with all that Hashem has given him.

4. Who is an honourable person? Certainly not somebody who seeks honour from others, but rather honours other people. When a person has a strong self-esteem, he has no problem doing this.

Being alone, in this case, is a trait of Hashem. We do not need to constantly compare ourselves to others. If we do, we'll go crazy. We'll be jealous because he has this nice car, she has that nice outfit, he has this incredible job, she has ... etc... It will never end.

However, when somebody makes himself alone and makes his happiness dependent on himself only; THEN he will reach true happiness. Have a great Shabbos!

In this week's parsha, we have a very interesting battle take place between Yaakov and a malach (angel). Now, I'm not going into what happened, since we're obviously not speaking of some guy with wings on his back with a long sword locked in mortal combat with Yaakov. Obviously, we are dealing with something far more spiritual and most likely kabalistic. As I explained before, since none of you are on my high spiritual level, I'm unable to explain it to you without you turning into a pile of bones.

However, I will say over the lesson that Rav Miller teaches.

In this battle, the malach strikes Yaakov in the hip, dislocating it. From here, the Torah commands us that we are not to eat the gid hanashe, the sinew located at the hip of the animal. Asks Rav Miller, why is it so important that we refrain from eating this part of the animal?

We know from the Midrash that this malach was Eisav's malach. This battle was a battle between everything that Eisav stood for vs. everything that Yaakov stood for. This was not a battle of individuals; it was a spiritual battle of nations.

Rav Miller continues and says that this battle was so torturous for Yaakov, that he actually wanted to give up; however he knew the stakes that he was fighting for were too high.

The Gemara (Kesubos 32b) writes that had Chananiah, Mishael, and Azariah has been tortured, instead of accepting a quicker death, they would have bowed down to Nebuchadnezzar. Simply put, sometimes it's easier to die for one's cause than it is to live for it.

Usually, when a malach fights a human being, the malach will tend to win. This includes Yaakov. However, Hashem saw that Yaakov was doing his best to fight Eisav, so he gave him the power to fight, as the Gemara (Makkos 10b) writes, "The way a man wants to go that is how he is led". When a person has the will, Hashem provides the way.

However, there came a point where Yaakov became weak and his desire to surrender overcame his desire to fight. At that point, the malach gained the upper hand and twisted Yaakov's thigh out of its socket (why the thigh is for another dvar torah). After that terrific blow, Yaakov regained his inner-strength and overcame the malach.

What happened after this battle? After taking this lesson to heart, Yaakov moves on and meets up with Eisav. There Eisav 'kissed' his neck. Rashi notes that Eisav actually tried to bite Yaakov's neck, but found his neck to be as firm as marble. Yaakov toughened every part of his body for Eisav.

Rav Miller continues and says, "It is not enough to be frum Jews in general, Shomer Shabbos in general. We must be Torah Jews in every aspect of our lives" when battling Eisav.

General Patton, a famous World War II commander, the day before D-Day gave a speech that became legendary. In it, he yelled at his troops [this is the cleaned up version]: "I don't want to get any messages saying, ‘I am holding my position.’ We are not holding a thing. Let the Germans do that. We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything, except the enemy … Our basic plan of operation is to advance and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the enemy.”

It's not enough to merely do the mitzvos as we are required to do, and 'move on with life'. The Torah is our life and we need to constantly use as much strength as possible to win the battle against the Yetzer Horah. We should try to put in as much energy and zeal in every mitzvah that we do. Our lives should be constantly advancing towards our ultimate goal of becoming close to Hashem. OUR basic plan of operation is to advance in Torah and mitzvos and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the Yetzer Horah.

For all those who were wondering, we've given the baby two names. Her official name is Rochel Leah (from last week's parsha), while the name I gave her is, The Creature That Won't Let Me Sleep. My wife prefers the first. Thank G-d though, everybody is doing well. And a double thanks goes to the fact that my mother-in-law is here helping out so my wife can recover. Hence, she gets a lot of credit for me being able to write this. So, in the few minutes that I have, on to Torah!"And Yaakov became very frightened, and it distressed him" (32:8)

This pasuk really confused me when I first saw it. It doesn't really make sense. After everything Yaakov has been through, after speaking with Hashem on a one-to-one basis, gaining His brachas and promises, Yaakov, when confronting Eisav, became frightened?

The Gemara (Brachas 4a) writes that Yaakov's fear came from the concern that perhaps he sinned (did a "cheit") and therefore forfeited Hashem's protection. That leads us to wonder, what cheit could Yaakov have done to deserve this? Targum Yonasan explains that Yaakov felt that he was lax in the mitzvah of honouring his parents. Why? Since he was away for so many years he was unable to do the mitzvah, while Eisav did it all by himself. This leads us to continue to wonder: Why would this be considered a cheit. Yaakov wasn't negligent, he was unable to perform it, since he lived so far away. Why should he worry that Hashem's protection would be nullified because of this?

The common translation for the word "cheit" is sin. However Rav Mordechai Gifter cites Rashi (Melachim I, 1:21) in which he defines "cheit" as a deficiency or an imperfection. This leads us to a better understanding on what is a sin. Sin is an imperfection of the soul. Therefore, even if somebody did not do a "sin", as we commonly define it, but rather failed to do a mitzvah, this is a blemish on his soul. While we might not consider this to be a sin, per se, but the Heavenly Court will consider this as a blemish.

Now we can understand a little of Yaakov's fear. For years Yaakov was not able to perform the mitzvah of honouring one's parents on the same level as Eisav was able to. So, in comparison to Eisav, Yaakov had a blemish concerning this mitzvah.

Rav Gifter continues and cites the Ramban, who says that in order to earn Olam Haba (The Next World), one must perform at least mitzvah properly with total devotion (not as easy as it sounds), with zero percent of personal motivation. He must do the mitzvah with 100% perfect intention and in a perfect manner. There is no room for cheit. Therefore, Hashem has given us a whole range of mitzvos to perform. By working on all the mitzvos, we are bound to observe at least one in the correct manner. Hence, it is in our best interest to approach each mitzvah with the utmost care. We do not know the power of each mitzvah, but according to the Ramban, we see the result when they are performed in a perfect manner.

A happy Thanksgiving to all! I hope everybody is enjoying their four-day weekend. You better enjoy it, since I don't have a four-day weekend. In fact, I don't have a weekend. You see, here in Israel, our week starts on Sunday morning and ends early Friday afternoon. That means, our only weekend is Shabbos. I won't complain. Personally, I think it's better this way. My neighbor in Chicago, Dr. Kramer, once made an interesting remark. He used to live in Israel for around 13 years, and moved back to the States around four years ago. He noticed that many people use Sunday as not only a day off from work, but also a day off from learning. Here in Israel, Sunday is just another day of the week. People are still able to get all their house work done, and still put in a full day of learning (if they learn full time), or a full day of working and learning. It was a good piece of mussar for me, since I was in the category of people who had a 'lighter' learning schedule on Sundays. Thankfully, I no longer have an excuse :) Okay, on to Torah!

"I lived (garti) with Lavan and have lingered until now" (32:5)

This pasuk was said by Yaakov to his brother Eisav after leaving his father-in-law Lavan, and heading back to the Land of Israel. There's a famous Medrash, which practically the entire religious world knows. The word 'garti', or 'lived', has the numerical value (in Hebrew, of course) of 613. Which is, interestingly enough, the same number of mitzvos a Jew is commanded to live by. Of course, this is not by circumstance. The Medrash translates this pasuk as, "Although I have lived with Lavan, I have observed all 613 mitzvos, and I have not learned from his evil ways".

From here we learned that Yaakov observed all 613 mitzvos, despite living with Lavan, who was a thief and idol-worshiper. For fourteen years, Yaakov lived with Lavan, yet did not pick up ANY of his traits. So, a small question is raised concerning the Medrash. Yaakov asserts that he observed all 613 mitzvos and at the same time admits that he did not learn from Lavan's evil ways. If Yaakov kept all 613, isn't it obvious that he did not learn from Lavan's ways? He simply should have said he kept all 613 mitzvos, and that would be the end of the story! Why should he specifically mention that he did not learn from Lavan's ways?

Rav Ovadia Yosef, Shlita, cites a parable from the Ben Ish Chai to help us understand the answer to this question. Once the Yetzer Horah (the Evil Inclination) met up with the Yetzer Tov (the Good Inclination). The Yetzer Horah said to the Yetzer Tov, "Why should we constantly be at odds with one another? Let us make peace. I will give you a list of my 'clients', and you will give me a list of yours". The Yetzer Tov decided to make the deal.

One of the Yetzer Tov's number one clients was a great scholar whose whole life resonated his learning. He spent day and night learning and practicing the Torah's ways. Now, according to this deal, the Yetzer Horah was given a free reign with this tzaddik. Once, late at night, as the scholar was learning, the Yetzer Horah was successful in inducing him into taking a break from his learning, for some fresh air. Once outside, the scholar went for a small walk. After a bit, he found himself near the local tavern. Still under some of the power of the Yetzer Horah, the scholar decided to see what was going on, and stepped in. He found himself a table in the corner, and simply looked around. Nearby, was a table surrounded by men playing cards, with drinks and food. This scholar sat a while and simply watched how intent these people were in their game, and how they completely ignored the food and drink nearby.

After a bit, the scholar had enough and returned home. Upon his return, he began to cry out loud. His crying was so loud, that it awoke his wife. After his wife asked what his problem was, he replied, "Until tonight I thought I was 'gold'; I thought I was observant to the extreme. Now I see I am no more than 'copper'. My commitment is not as intense as it should be". After relating the story of his trip to the tavern, he continued, "Do you know that those men never looked up from their cards? They ignored their food; that's how engrossed they were in their game. I cannot say that! When I study Torah, my mind wanders, and I get hungry. I am not studying diligently enough! From now on, I will apply myself better to the Torah!"

When the Yetzer Horah met the Yetzer Tov the next day, the Yetzer Horah wanted to break the deal. "Not only was I unsuccessful in swaying the tzaddik away from his learning, in fact, he became even more committed to it!"

From here we can better understand what Yaakov was telling his brother. While he kept all 613 mitzvos to 'the T', he failed to learn from Lavan's dedication. Lavan did anything and everything under the sun to try to cheat Yaakov from his proper dues. He used all of his energies to undermine him.

Today we have plenty of Lavans in the world. Some are evil, some are not. On one hand we see people so committed to their businesses that they destroy their health and families. On another hand, we see our Arab brethren giving their lives in quest of jihad. We have an obligation to learn from these people. These people have a perverse sense in life. To that, there is no question. Yet, they are so dedicated and focused to their missions and beliefs that they are willing to give up their very lives. Perhaps we can incorporate a little bit of this "Lavan mentality" into our lives. We should try our utmost to increase our dedication to learning and living Torah. We are not commanded to destroy our families, or to kill ourselves, to receive reward, we are obligated to keep the Torah. By not only living our lives according to all 613 mitzvos, but doing so with the enthusiasm and dedication that Lavan showed, we can rest assured that we will be truly earning our piece in the World to Come. Have a great Shabbos!

I recently saw a video clip via the web on a great documentary (via memri.org) that is currently showing throughout the Arab world (you know, the ones who want peace). It was a non-fictional look at the Jewish Conspiracy. This particular film was about how we take people who marry non-Jews and ritually slaughter them. Another clip was a re-enactment of how we kill non-Jewish children and use their blood for matzos. It's interesting what we do behind the backs of the foolish non-Jewish world. It also amazes me that only the Arabs have caught on. Anyhow, two questions came to mind concerning this video and other anti-Semitic (I'm sorry, I believe they refer to themselves now as "anti-Zionists") works. 1) Why is it they go out of their way to mention the word "Talmud" as much as possible, as if it's some secret text which few people have access to? 2) Why is it they always have us wearing a tallis? The only time we really where a tallis is when in the shul in the mornings. It's not like we wear them wherever we go. "Yes dear, I'm on my way to the store to pick up some meat. Let me just put my tallis on first" or "Okay, first we kidnap the Christian child...oh, oh...I forgot to put on my tallis! According to the Sacred Secret texts of the TALMUD, I need to wear my tallis, before I bring a sacrifice!" Anybody have an explanation for this?

Okay, on to Torah."Therefore the Bnei Yisroel are not to eat the displaced sinew (Gid HaNasheh) on the hip socket...because he (the angel) struck Yaakov's hip-socket on the displaced sinew" (32:33)

Interesting story in this parsha. As Yaakov is walking about, he's suddenly attacked by an angel (we're told that it was Eisav's "guardian angel"), they duke it out, the angel hits Yaakov's hip-socket, and displaces the sinew or Gid HaNasheh in Hebrew. This whole concept of Yaakov wrestling with an angel and all that is all kabalistic and esoteric, and I don't have the time to explain it to you mere humans (mainly since I don't know it). Instead we're going to focus on something else.

Let's take a quick look at the word Nasheh. According to its plain meaning learned out from this pasuk, it means 'displaced'. But lo and behold, we find another instance where this word is used in the Torah. Concerning Yosef speaking to his brothers, it says, "G-d has made me forget (Neshani) all my hardships." Here it means "forget," i.e., his memory was removed. Now, we can translate the Gid HaNasheh as the 'nerve of forgetfulness'.

Rav Avigdor Tzvi Nebentzhal suggests that this is exactly what it means. Forgetfulness can be a blessing and a curse. When a person goes through a traumatic experience, his brain might purposefully forget that instance so the pain goes away. Another case is when a person loses somebody close to them. After a while, we forget the pain. Imagine living life with that pain you experienced on the day of their death, every single moment of your life! It would be impossible to live. On the other hand, forgetfulness can be a bad thing. Any male who is currently married can testify to this fact.

As mentioned above, this angel was Eisav's personal angel. It was Eisav's angel that harmed our 'nerve of forgetfulness'. Why was this nerve attacked? Because Eisav wanted us to forget our connection with G-d. He wanted us to forget our learning. He wanted us to forget everything G-d has done and continues to do for us, each and every day. This is why Yaakov was attacked there. By constantly reviewing our learning and by not immersing ourselves in the materialistic world, we will constantly remember Hashem. Through these measures, we can overcome this power of forgetfulness, and in turn overcome Eisav's angel.

Have a great Shabbos!

About the Author

Michael Winner

Avreich - Web Developer - Father - Tired

Michael Winner is a full-time member of a kollel in northern Israel, works at night as a web-developer, is a father of five, and can often be found on the floor where he must have passed out.