She was collared outside the store and arrested, and allegedly found to be packing $84.91 of smalls, including lacy lingerie-style underwear, according to NBC Miami.

In the arrest report, Fleischmann reportedly said she had lifted the unpaid-for delicates for purely professional purposes. She was planning to wear them – briefly presumably – in her job as a dancer at the Crystal Cabaret Gentleman's club.

She allegedly admitted she'd taken the kids with her as cover, reasoning that they would lower the chances of her being arrested.

She added that she'd only just regained custody of the children, and "couldn't believe this was happening again".

The children were placed in the care of social services, and earned Fleischmann a charge on child cruelty on top of the inevitable petty retail theft charge.

A quick rummage around Google fails to uncover a link for the Crystal Cabaret, but according to a number of really NSFW review sites, it's a "pastie" club that gets an underwhelming overall score of 5 out of 10. ®