fast tracking you to career excellence by kayode olufemi-ayoola( Your Career Mgt Coach)

Monday, 30 April 2012

The Power of Personal Valuesbykayode.ayoola@gmail.com

“We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we
are” Do you know what this popular quote by Anais Nin means?

Well I think it means that
we all tend to view things not as they truly are, but within the context of our
personal preconceived notions and prejudices. We measure everything and
everyone by our impressions, beliefs and values – our previous experiences
usually affect our expectation of future realities. We only see what we are
prepared to see.

Not words…but meanings.

This is often the reason why
in “good conversations”, as stated by Emerson, people don’t speak to the
“words” but to the “meanings of each other” – It is not so much about what is actually said, but more of what we actually think has been said. As
Richard Pascale said “…we are much more likely, to fulfill our perceptions
about how the world works than we are to fulfill our goals, ideals and
visions.”- in fact it is believed that you can affect other people’s perception about you, by what you perceive and
communicate about yourself.

A Harvard research has shown
that 90% of the errors in thinking are errors of perception. When companies
advertise their brands, it is to your perception of their brand that they
appeal to. It is not what is, but what you think it is. Little wonder
advertising and media communication remains big business. Truth be told…Your
perception is your reality.

If perception is such a big
deal, I need to know, “How can I in my daily conversations, address and respond
effectively, to the “meanings and nuances of conversation of the next person?”

It all begins with clarifying,
understanding and interpreting your values. If you are not clear
on your values, on what’s most important in your life, what you truly stand
for; if you ever find yourself in a situation where you have a tough time
making a decision about something – it is because you have a values conflict –
what this means is that all decision making comes down to values clarification.

What exactly are Values?

‘Values’ is literally
translated from the Latin word, valere, which means, “to be strong” – this
means something that gives you strength, something that is important to you;
something that you feel strongly about, something that is worth standing up
for, something that gives your life a meaning. It is defined as, “deep
engrained principles that guide your actions”. Values are the lenses through
which we view ourselves and the world – the essence of our thoughts, feelings
and behaviours.

Your true values, someone said, are
the principles you live by in your life. They are the behaviours and activities
you are naturally drawn to. Your true values define who you really are. Too
often, we find it hard to identify what is really important to us. Instead we pursue goals which are out of alignment
with our values and wonder why we feel unbalanced, dissatisfied and why
things are not working out. (Just like a car with the engine in perfect
condition but with tyres out of alignment).

Clarifying your top four values

Although values are powerful
when unearthed, they can be difficult to bring to the surface because they
operate below our conscious awareness; and as such would require the
administration of a set of tools or a test like the values matrix, to help identify
which values significantly contribute to an individual’s value judgments and make up the essence of the
choices which drive behavioural patterns- (you can email kayode.ayoola@gmail.com for details on how to receive a values matrix evaluation)

After this, now what?

After you come up with your
top four values, ask yourself, “What do my values need to be, to achieve my
goals? It’s the same as asking, “What
kind of person do I have to become to achieve my goals”?

You should however
understand that when considering a career change or habitual change of any kind,
your values also need to experience a shift; this is because you’ll need to
change at the core of who you are – how you think, how you look at the world –
you will need a paradigm shift involving significant adjustments in perspective
(It means who do I have to “be”, to “do” what is necessary to “have” whatever
it is I want to have.).

It is only when you are being the best you can
BE (which points to personal development), that you can DO what it takes to HAVE what you want in
life.

Peer
Mentoring

What you do next is to post your new
values at home, at work – anywhere they will be seen; particularly by people
who can hold you accountable to the new standard. Commit to a peer mentoring
process in order to make this a reality.
Jim Rohn said, “I wish to pay fair price for every value. If I have to pay for it or earn
it, that makes something of me. If I get it for free, that makes nothing of me.
All values must be won by contest, and after they have been won, they must be
defended.”

All of this will cause you to change the
way you look at things; causing the things you look at to change for you.

Every time a value is
born, existence takes on a new meaning; every time one dies, some part of that
meaning passes away. Joseph Krutch.

Here’s to your success!

“We can be depended
on to tell you what you don't want to hear, to help you see what you don't want to see, so you can be
who you have always known you could be” Executive Toolkit