Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Living the Dream - An Announcement

In response to the polite phone conversation starter "So what are you up to?" my friend Amber, a busy SAHM with four beyond-cute kids who are active in (you name it), who also is in charge of primary(our ward's children's ministry) and does (who knows what else), replied "You know - living the dream." And even though we laughed, I really think she means it.

This is something that has been on my mind lately. Living the dream. What is my dream? I am a mother of two who is constantly TOO busy with a husband who also works hard. I do contract instructional design work and get paid a not-at-all-too-shabby amount to do it. I can set my hours, can work from home and do what I enjoy. Perfect job, right? And we don't even have to pay childcare because I watch my friend's little boy twice a week and she watches my kids twice a week.

Yet I am unable to give 100% to anything. And that frustrates me. I have wrestled with what to do about this for a few months.

Thus, I have decided to stop working and just be a stay at home mom for the time being once I finish out my contracts. Maybe someday when my kids are older and the perfect job opportunity arises, I will reconsider. But right now, they need their Mama at home and my husband needs someone to support him at this time in his life like he supported me while I went through school. And, as much as I do not LOVE doing domestic chores, they have to get done, and there is something that can be said when a house has order and my baby doesn't have to live with dog hair in his diaper. I worked way too hard to get my babies here in our family to not be there for as much of their lives as I can and provide a home for them that gives them a place to thrive.

Besides, I want to have the time to do the other things that matter most to me - like helping others who need help, serving the Primary kids at church, attending the temple on a regular basis, staying in touch with my family, spending time with my friends, writing to my blog, scrapbooking, smocking, running, cooking healthy meals, etc.

I am grateful I earned my Master's and had the opportunity to work for the many years I did. It was the right decision at the time. Now, this is the right time to scale back and hunker down in my nest and take care of my baby birds.

My friend Becky says to me quite often that "You can have it all, just not all right now." And something about that saying solidifies the peaceful assurance that I am making the right decision.

6 comments:

Becky WW
said...

Thanks for posting my quote, but I cannot take credit for it, the book "Sequencing" does a good job of talking about women's life choices and balance. You are a wonderful example of an intelligent, talented wife/mom, making good choices. Love you lots. Becky

Kristi - love those babies - they are only young once. They grow so fast that in no time they are out of the house and you will have all the time in the world to work on your career.Enjoy even the bad moments, because that is what makes journal memories. Remember what is important in your life (your family) and smile and be happy with your life in this moment.

You really are living the dream! I cannot support your decision highly enough. It is the right one for you and your family (at least for now).

For me, having my babies in my life at all is my version of living the dream. When I get bummed that I have to work I remind myself that I love my kids with all my heart, I just can't love them with all my time. That plus the HUGE BLESSING that I get to work from home is what gets me through the (work) day.

About Us

Lance is an attorney that specializes in intellectual property.
Kristi is a geographer and instructional designer who just received her MS degree in Instruction Design and Educational Technology at Cal State Fullerton and does free lance consulting ID work.
Elisabeth, our first child, is now a busy toddler. She enjoys playing with her dog, wearing dresses every day and singing "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" whenever she can.
Carsten is our sweet, mellow baby who is known for his sweet grin and belly laugh he likes to dish out to all the girls he meets.
Sofi is a beagle who loves eating, sleeping, playing at the dog park, and playing catch with her squeaky toys.