etsu: 2011-2014

Who Wants to Marry a Feminist?/Lisa Miya-Jervis

I admired the way that Miya-Jevis thinks and reacts in her writing about the reaction that people have to women, feminists, getting married to men in a “traditional” sort of way. While reading, I can’t really say I disagreed with much of her viewpoints-

“Wasn’t is feminists who fought so hard to procure the basic rights that used to be obliterated by marriage? Because of the women’s right movement, we can maintain our own bank accounts; we can make our own health care choices; we can refuse sex with our husbands and prosecute them is they don’t comply. “

She takes this image that narrow minded people, and even some narrow minded feminist have with feminists-that all hate men, none get married, etc. And those who do get married, lead a different marriage than any other “non-feminist”. However, Miya-Jervis seems to lead a perfectly “normal”, “traditional” marriage; she even says sge wishes she could take the good of marriage and leave out the rest. She admits its not for everyone, but it works for her. And that’s her main argument; just because she may be a feminist, doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to leave alone with cats and hate men for the rest of her life, feminists marry men and lead a normal marriage. I sometimes I feel that feminists may even have a better chance with a longer, healthier marriage possible because they won’t become submissive, the relationship would be more equal (in my opinion).
Also, it was pretty irritating for a feminist to buy Miya-Jervis’s magazine she edits and thus learn of her being married to a man, and become appalled at the fact that she was married..to a man. I didn’t understand such idiocy. However, it also showed that even those who may consider themselves feminist, liberals, can still be extremely closed off.