(Newser)
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Why does passion so often fizzle in a marriage? Prepare to be shocked: Bettina Arndt’s The Sex Diaries reveals the reasons aren’t what you think, the Daily Mail reports. Included in the nearly 100 couples who kept diaries for a year are many men who love their wives and wonder where the sex went—without turning to cheating or porn—and women who simply don’t have high libidos.

“Exploring the limits of sexual potential has little to do with clever techniques,” says the author, “but a lot to do with how two people feel about themselves and each other outside the bedroom.” Difficult emotions were often the unseen culprit behind a dying sex life—and for women who feel little desire, the answer may be fairly simple. “Just do it,” writes one diarist. “It always feels good.”