Monday, October 22, 2018

I know many people have struggled with sending their kids to school too early. In fact my Mom questioned that with me. I was almost held back when I was in 2nd grade. I always wonder if we sent Mica to school a year too late.

He started preschool when he just turned 3, so he could be with his cousin Evan that had been 3 for 3 months, was in preschool for 2 years, while Mica was in it for 3 years.

Why We Waited to Send Him to Kindergarten:

Mica was slow with his fine motor skills for the 1st 2 years of preschool, and the 1st year he didn't participate in any group activities.

See the photo of him covering his eyes? That's what Mica did during group activity time.

The preschool teachers actually thought there was something wrong with the muscles in his hands. He wouldn't hold hold a pencil, crayon, or scissors correctly. We went as far as talking to his Pediatrician, and having the school district come out to access Mica's lack of muscle in his hands. They said, "There's nothing wrong with your son."

That summer before Mica's 3rd year in preschool his fine motors clicked big time. It's like he was waiting to use his hands before they worked perfectly! He drew pictures with so much detail for his age, and could cut out curves and zig-zags. He continued on with preschool, and the teachers couldn't believe the difference in him.

His whole 3rd year in preschool I wondered if he should have been in Kindergarten already. Everyone kept saying, "You'll be so glad you waited! He's a boy, and has an August birthday!"

On to Kindergarten:

Mica turned 6 soon after Kindergarten started. He was always ahead. He got 1's or A's all throughout elementary school. The only thing they'd say was, "He could elaborate more. He could problem solve more." Both of which I contribute to his laziness. He was friends with kids that were above the spectrum like he was. He was one of the only kids that was consistently in the gifted program.

Friendships have been rough along the way. He was good friends with a kid that moved, he was wonderful friends with a girl that decided she didn't want to be friends with boys - that really confused him, he was friends with a boy that was nice but switched classes and then they somehow couldn't reconnect, and he was friends with a boy that only Mica asked over to do things - Mica grew tired of the other boy's lack of trying.

It wasn't until his 5th grade year he slightly connected with 2 kids. Then it was time to move on to middle school.

Moving on to Middle School:

We've had the kids and parents over that Mica slightly connected with his 5th grade year. We like the parents!

What does Mica do when we get together with them? He hangs with the kids for a bit. Then he comes to sit with the adults. He often times migrates towards adults over kids his own age. His vocabulary has always been way above what other kid's his age is. Those kids are gifted too. One started school when she was 4, turning 5.

I do wish the Gifted Talented Teacher would work with Mica more! The one at the elementary school level is fantastic! Mica emailed her last year to ask when he'd get to see her? She responded, then never met with him. I was hoping she'd push him more.

ACT:

We got a letter in the mail from Duke Tip. It was saying that Mica did so well on his Standardized Testing, they want him to take his ACTs. He's only in 7th grade.

I don't even know how I feel about this. I did so bad! I got a 14! Begged to take it untimed, and got a 25! I've always said that determining smartness in a kid by how well they do on Standardized Tests, ACTs and SATs is not right! They put me in the lowest of low English classes when I was a kid. I loved English. I got A's, but would mess up on my standardized test. They moved me up to the regular English class, and I got an A still! All my friends were gifted kids. I wrote Standardized Tests, ACTs and SATs off as a crock of duke.

Here my son tests so high that they want to have him take his ACTs early!What if Mica taking his ACT test is pressuring him too much?

I had to look up what Duke TIP was. I had no clue. I was in the special classes for people that needed help in school. Not in special honors type classes!

We had conferences with Mica. They have the kid in with the parents in many cases now a days. Mica's getting all A's and 2 B's.

A (B) in Gym because he couldn't run with Shin Splints. That I get!

Also a (B) in his honors Pre Algebra course. He was missing a few assignments. I asked if he could make them up? His teacher said, "Yes" and that we could find them online. I couldn't find the pages online, emailed her, and she couldn't find them online either. Mica could have done them, and the teacher didn't get them recorded. Regardless by doing the 2 worksheets he could pull up his grade. Mica's response, "Don't worry about it. I'll just bring the grade up. It's an honor's course. It's good I got a B." I had his teacher email me the pages. She gave me the instructions for him to do the even problems, but I made him do them all. He gets lazy if you let him get lazy! He did all the work. Then he told me the sheets were in his backpack. In actuality he couldn't find 1 of the sheets. Well it was on the table. He would have walked out that door making me into a liar to his teacher. I told her he'd have the sheets in on Monday!

I found out from his Social Studies teacher that he's great in class. She just feels bad because 1/2 the class is bad apples, and the other 1/2 is above average. She put Mica in Quiz Bowl, which I think is great for him! They meet some Saturdays for brainy sessions. He needs to be challenged to be less lazy! I'm hoping through Quiz Bowl he can possibly develop some good friendships! Pretty please!

Fall Festival:

Isaak's Fall Festival through school was on Friday. There were a lot of kids Mica's age there. Many from his elementary class. That includes the ones we've had over from time to time.

It seemed like there were groups of kids here, and groups of kids there. Where was Mica? Hanging out with the adults.

I decided to look up stuff on Gifted Kids because I never have. I always thought, Well he does well in school, what would I possibly need to know other than that?It turns out there is more to know. I've been good with sending the kids to camps during the summer, having Mica move up to honors courses is a great thing, but I did read this website that explained friendships:

"There’s a reason your gifted teen has older friends—or wants them. Water seeks its own level . . . and so does intellect. Gifted teens often find that they have more in common with other teens slightly older than themselves and thus, they seek out their company. Seldom is this harmful, and more often than not, it can actually help your teen mature in beneficial ways, as older youth will let the younger ones know when they are acting 'like kids'. Social modeling is frequently a positive result when younger gifted teens spend time with their older counterparts."

Leadership Camp:

The boys have been back at their Leadership Camp, for about 4 weeks now. Most kids are difficult there: Underprivileged, struggle with family life and school... Then there's our kids. We aren't rich, but our boys get their needs met. Our kids do well in school. The leaders at camp asks about our kids a lot. That's to help with the funding of the organization. When I express my concerns...all the stuff above and more I feel like, they probably think our boy's problems aren't really problems in comparison to everyone else. To me Mica's being lazy by settling for a (B) in Pre Algebra, when he could easily get an (A). It would be different if he worked his ass off, and got a (B). I'd be proud of him for that (B). Mica not having friendships with kids his own age is a slight problem in my mind. I'd love for him to connect with more people! Isaak has a whole other list of problems: He totally can't get on board with his teacher this year, his vocabulary is the opposite of Mica's - limited, and he's a Drama King. I feel like my concerns are odd in comparison to many.

I don't know if I should have sent Mica to school a year earlier to begin with. I can't change that now. It's just something I think about. I do know that I need to keep pushing him. He could easily slip down a slippery slope to Lazyville.

3 comments:

I always wonder if I sent my son too soon. Actually, I know I did, but my mindset was that if he was aged to go, he should go. I didn't even consider waiting. However, since he was always a quiet, shy little man, looking back I wish I'd kept him home one more year to help him mature. That being said, he got through school and college just fine, so maybe I should just let it go. lol

I know I sent my son to school too early. My son was born at the end of Julu. It really didn't hit until fourth grade because of the screwy school calendar the school had. They began school right after the Fourth of July and about two weeks into the new school year I got a call from hs teacher saying that his behavior was not appropriate for his grade. I had to explain to the teacher that he was eight and about to turn nine and that most kids in the class were nine turning ten.

It took until he reached high school before the teachers stopped calling me about him having grade-appropriate behavior.

Mariah could have waited a year longer, she was always the youngest in her class but the smartest. She didn't connect with her peers very well. She only has a small handful of friends in college now too but seems okay with that. She's happy where she's at in life and we couldn't ask for more than that.

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