He Cheated on You – Now What? How to Deal with Infidelity the Right Way

Posted by Andra Picincu on September 4th, 2013

Have you caught your spouse cheating? How should you react? What can a reasonable woman do once her partner has crossed the line of infidelity? Can trust ever be restored? Should it be? First of all, you shouldn’t act impulsively. Don’t bust into his work and make a scene. Analyze the situation and don’t jump to conclusions until you’ve done your homework. If you decide to forgive your spouse, you can’t expect things to go back to normal overnight. There are many ways to deal with infidelity in a relationship. You just have to find one that works best for you.

What to Do If Your Husband Is Cheating

Once you find out that your spouse is cheating, you can look at it two ways. You can either get over it, or assume that if you allowed him to “get away” with it the first time, he’s going to do it again. There is no right or wrong when it comes to dealing with a cheating spouse. Try to remain calm and keep a close eye on what’s going on. Leaving your husband should be your last resort.

Continue monitoring his behavior, attitude, activities, and the frequency of his contact with his lover. Men cheat for a variety of reasons, such as the desire to try new things, touch another person, or just have fun. However this doesn’t mean that his feelings for you have faded. Most times, it’s just sex. Women tend to overemphasize these things and so they start stocking their partners, calling them every five minutes, and making their life miserable. Ladies, if a guy wants to cheat on you, he will do it anyway whether you like it or not. There’s no way to prevent this from happening. What you can do is to handle the whole thing gracefully and make sure your spouse is there when you need him.

Statistics show that infidelity strikes 25% of all marriages. Stress and everyday problems cause people to opt out and cheat on their partners. The Internet opens a whole new world of possibilities to cheating husbands. Text messaging and cell phones make it easier to have conversations on the sly. Your husband doesn’t need a particular reason to cheat on you. He will do it out of curiosity, out of boredom, or just for the sake of it. The thrill of something new makes him feel desirable again.

Ways to Make a Relationship Work after a Cheating Episode

The first thing you should do is to analyze his behavior. Does he show remorse? Is he trying to explain the whole thing? It’s better not to have a conversation at this point. If he cares about you, then he’s going to say everything under the galaxy to make you forgive him. This is not a time for negotiation. Take space and wait a few days before talking to him. Whatever you do, you do it thoughtfully. Once you’ve given a little time for the wound to heal, you’ll be able to look at the situation more objectively.

Don’t tell all of your friends about his infidelity. This will make things worse. Make sure you’re talking with someone you know you can trust. If possible, see a psychologist. He or she is able to remain objective and help you deal with infidelity the right way. Don’t ignore your husband’s affair or pretend it’s not happening. When you confront your spouse, ask him why he did this. Make it a conversation, not an accusation. Listen to what he has to say. Even though nothing could justify his behavior, at least you should know his reasons. After having this conversation, you’ll be able to make a decision regarding your marriage. Find the problems and work up the solutions so you could have a fresh start. Never accept responsibility for his cheating.

Should you forgive a cheating husband? Ignore his words and focus on the acts. A guy can say anything to get you back. Let your husband prove you that he deserves your forgiveness. Don’t cry or beg for your marriage. If he doesn’t seem interested in you, let him go away. You deserve something better. Show some dignity. Give yourself plenty of time to heal and focus on your needs.

About the Author

Andra Picincu is a professional freelance writer, psychologist, and Internet marketing consultant. She's also a certified nutritionist and fitness trainer. From SEO article writing and blog writing to business writing, social networking and web content development, she can help you boost your website in search engines and provide the highest quality content to your visitors.