Self-love. This is a concept that many, today, take so much pride in and have essentially become walking advertisements spreading this message. That isn’t a bad thing, of course. But you see, doesn’t it become an utter conflict to cling to nonsense tips on “how to love yourself” a little more today and maybe tomorrow and this coming new year? Man, imagine how many of these new year resolutions and promises to ourselves will be to smile a little more, live a little more, and risk a little more? But in reality… that’s every new year, no?

Love yourself. I was one of those self-loving zombies who greatly believed in this selfish act. This was a concept I wholeheartedly preached to my family, peers and all colleagues of mine. It’s not that I don’t presently believe in self-love because believe me, I earnestly do, but I went about it the wrong way by following the ONLY way I thought there was to finally achieving such a self-actualizing feeling. Even using the word “achieving” gives me chills.. what a terrible perspective to have on such a beautiful concept of self-love. I adamantly forced self-love onto others only because I was so desperate to find the meaning of it all. I did this because I couldn’t ever find the heart to actually “love” myself or know how or where to begin.The Art of Self-Love. This is the thing about the beauty of loving yourself. There is no one way to go about it, feel it, and live it. You don’t just find it or happen to come across it. Sometimes, all it simply takes is confidence and a strong mind and heart. And other times, it takes absolute self-destruction to realize your full potential. Shit happens. Life happens. Everyday isn’t going to be as perfect as that one girl’s Instagram photo captioned, “So happy! Lovin’ life! #blessed.” I’m sure that girl’s day probably wasn’t perfect to a tee anyway. But let’s keep that between you and me.

There is no ‘The’ in the art of self-love. There is only ‘Your.’

Your Art of Self-Love. Why is it yours? Well it’s simple, really. It’s your own raw and gut-turning experience. How amazing is that?! Knowing that you and your mind, soul, and heart are the only elements that truly understand all your situations whether they’re life-changing or not. That’s why there is no one way to love yourself. Your art of self-love begins when you’re ready to fully embrace and accept not only yourself, but whatever else it is that is hindering your own personal self-development. It starts when you’ve stopped comparing yourself to others and know that you are already an awesome and unique human being.

It starts when you’ve fought the fight of never feeling good enough. It starts with you and only you can paint today, tomorrow, and the new year with your very own art of self-love.

So, let’s trash all the mental tips on “how to love yourself” and unkept new year resolutions, shall we? To hell with new year resolutions! It all starts today and the creation of your own customized self-loving masterpiece all lies in your heart. Always remember, it is your art of self-love and no one could ever take that away from you.