Sleeping With the Rosetta Stone August 9, 2008

Since the advent of energy saving bulbs, I have taken to leaving my bedside lamp on all night–because I sleep better with the light on. (Really.) But what helps me the most with my chronic inability to fall asleep is The Rosetta Stone language learning software.

I put my old laptop next to my pillow, lie on my side, and sweep my index finger over the mouse pad, choosing the pictures that match the words at the top of the screen. I have Rosetta Stone Indonesian, Arabic, Thai, and Chinese. (That’s how extensive my sleep problems are!) The lessons meditate me, wash my mind of the weary details of the day, put me into a rhythm (bananas. . . tomatos. . .bananas and tomatos. . .). After clicking through a lesson or two, my eyelids droops. They have just enough muscle strength to watch me mouse to bailout-apple-shutdown. Then my hand goes slack and I sleep, visions of verbs and notions of nouns dancing in my head.

The boy is under the airplane. The boy is in the airplane. The boy is under the table. The man is hungry. The woman is not hungry. Plate. Tired. Long hair. Short hair. The bank. The post office. The children are jumping. Hairbrush.

I cannot imagine how I would accomplish my favorite sleep-inducement technique, if I were not Onely. Does anyone else have strange pre-sleep rituals that would be impossible if you were sharing a bed with a partner?