North Carolina Gets Very Clever

Senators on Tuesday tacked a suite of new restrictions and regulations pertaining to abortion clinics onto a bill dealing with the application of foreign laws in North Carolina family courts. The measure was unveiled unexpectedly during an unusual late-day committee meeting. It combines several bills in different stages of the legislative process into one omnibus measure. "It just took a while for there to be a consensus of support for it within our caucus," said Sen. Buck Newton, R-Wilson, chairman of the Judiciary 1 Committee. "Sometimes these things come together at the last minute."

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Hey, Senator Buck, OK if I believe that nothing you said there was in the same area code as the truth? It "took a while" for there to be consensus within your crazy-ass caucus on a piece of anti-choice legislation? What, did you have to argue down the powerful faction that insisted the doctors be hung with their own stethoscopes? Was there a problem convincing people that ladyparts did not have special hypnotic powers to control the minds of men? Could Jesus not get cell coverage last night? It's easier for me just to believe you're lying your ass off, Senator Buck.

The Senate met for much of the day, handling a variety of bills in other committees and on the floor. Just before 5:20 p.m., Senate Rules Chairman Tom Apodaca, R-Henderson, announced a recess and said the Senate Judiciary 1 Committee would meet at 5:30 p.m. Until then, the committee's calendar only listed House Bill 695, which prohibits the recognition of foreign law, such as Islamic Sharia law, in family courts. That measure was controversial when it cleared the House in May, with opponents fearing it could interfere with recognition of U.S. law in foreign courts. However, when the committee convened at 5:30 p.m., it quickly took up an amendment to revise HB 695 to include the regulations on abortion.

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Oh, mother of god, as was once said on The West Wing, now I've seen Shakespeare the way it's supposed to be done. First, the legislature wastes everybody's time on a fanciful anti-sharia-law piece of Mooooslim boogedy-boogedy because, as we know, sharia law oppresses women, then it uses that bill to camouflage passage of a package of anti-choice legislation that deprives women of their constitutional rights under American law. (I await eagerly Ross Cardinal Douthat's explanation that these shenanigans are all part of a spontaneous outburst of emotion in reaction to the Kermit Gosnell case.) If I thought irony could take it in its current condition, I'd run right over the the chronic ward where it's been since 2002 and tell irony all about it. The shenanigans go before the entire legislature today. I suspect some folks may be on their way to Raleigh to chat things over. The blog over at Kindly Doc Maddow's office promises to link to what ought to be a very interesting live feed. South Carolinians must be loving the hell out of this.