Monthly Archives: July 2016

Yesterday was my birthday N° 28.
and as usual all ihave got is a big desseptionand a few wishes on FB.
Usually my birthday is not a special occasion for me, and i never get the attention i wish for.
This years’ desseption was a little special, why ?
well because i was surrounded by a big number of persons, they did not noticed that it was my birthday (usually in my birthday i be at home with only my familly so i can’t blame persons if everything they do is write a wish on my FB wall but this is year i was participating in a scientific camp on that camp i was surrounded by a lot of people and with 5 of my best friends, so i expected that it could be different than getting wishes on FB wall ).

I was conscient that they dont memorise the date of my birthday and some of them they don’t even know it. but the date was mentionned on FB and i know that FB send notification about birthday dates. so i expected that they get the notification from the FB and do a little effort and a gest for me like gathering together and sing for me or get a little letter from them .
But that didn’t happened and even when i told them just two of my friends told me happy birthday.

I said that ok , this is not a big deal and maybe when i return home i will find a surprise .
but at home i got the same reaction, not a symbol of joy, happiness or a sign for a special occasion.
I got the same thing just some words just ” a HAPPY BIRTHDAY” .
I felt dessiption, and this is the first time in my life that i don’t appreciate words, also it’s the first time in my life that i feel that feeling on FB are just hypocresy, so virtual and so not real.
When you see the hundred of wished on my wall you say that waw how poppular she is and how loved she is , but in the real life you got nothing.Nothing except of few words

history is written by the victor , because the greek won the war, everything we know now is related to them and because they were able to keep and transmit their way of living and their culture , what if the persian won how probably the history would be wrote ??

And sometimes I wonder who I am
I do not see many people in my age asking this question?
Could that be because I lagged behind them and was delayed in knowing the answer and they had already discovered it, or may be they are tired of the search and did not find an answer so they stop looking and decide to forget about it , or it may be that they do not ask at all…And why they would ask in the first place and why they would want to know ? And why I want to know?
isn’t this is the question that exhausted humanity since it existed , so why would I want to know and why i feel upset that the quarter of my life pass in a research for this question and what do represent my age comparing to the age of humanity ?
Who i’m , to know how we are or maybe the opposite is the right way of asking the question who we are so i could know who i’m ?
What do I want from life, or is it why she would want from me ?
I think this is a funny question , who i’m and who we are so life would want something from us ? maybe life just make fun of us and of our self concentric point of view to the world.
I once heard an astronomical point of view says that we are the universe and that the universe is in us
Other say that we are conscious way to the univers to understand himself. I think that this is a funny theory too why would the universe needs to understand himself ?and if this is true , couldn’t he find an other way more sophisticated, intelligent, faster than us ?
I think that if really we are made on the image of the universe we would be made confused and accused to be in order
# Heresies