5 Sexy Ways to Heat Up Your Relationship when Winter Weather Strikes

shotsWhen the weather outside is frightful, but the fire is so delightful, it's like, we've got no place to go, so let it snow, let it snow, let it effing snow, am I right? But when you're done staring at the fireplace, and it's been three days and you haven't left the house, it's time to spice things up. Just say "no" to boredom and just say "yes" to sex. Or something like that. But basically, yeah, that's the gist. Sex.

So! Here are 5 ways to rekindle your sexy-time romance when winter weather keeps you all cooped up for days, and days, and days ...

Haven't exercised in a week and feel the need to break a sweat? Light a few candles, open a bottle of bourbon, and bust out the Twister board. You can either play Strip Twister, in which you need to remove an article of clothing every time you mess up, or just cut to the chase and play Naked Twister. Let the games begin!

You have lingerie. You do. So you need to break the emergency glass case you've been keeping it in and pull out some of your sexiest nighttime fancy lady wear. Maybe you had a naughty bra and panties set from college in the back of your drawer that he's never seen, or maybe you bought something when you were feeling frisky but never had the nerve to wear it ... well, NOW'S THE TIME. You're both going crazy in the house, so why not go crazy on each other?

Make dessert ... on ya boobs. Always wanted to make yourself a whipped cream bra? Yum! Put some of your favorite sweet treats, and his, up and down your body, lay yourself on the dining room table, and call him in for a meal time he'll never forget. Hint: chocolate syrup stains. That is an FYI.

Re-create spring break. It's colder than a witch's tit outside, so it's time to get steamy inside. Convert some room in your house into the ultimate Cancun tiki bar. Light candles, put on some salsa (or Rihanna, I feel like Rihanna is very appropriate for this occasion), wear a makeshift hula skirt and coconut bra, line up some goddamn tequila shots, and have yourselves a little party. Bonus points if you organize body shots and/or a wet t-shirt contest. Spoiler alert! Everybody wins.

Do ya homework. Google a sex position you've never tried, memorize it, and then be like, "Hey, honey? Could you come here? I need your help killing this stink bug." Then boom, you pounce on him like a spider and pull all sorts of sex moves that he's only dared to dream of. By the end, you won't know whether to bite his head off and eat it, or just, like, go to sleep.