A Broad Field of Corporate Idiots

Our inbox is so full of idiots, anyone snooping might think we operated a website ending in “.gov”…

Our faithful (and unfaithful) readers were busy over the weekend, nominating their choices for this year’s Daily Reckoning Financial Darwin Awards. It’s a tough field, to be sure, so we’re keeping the polls open for a couple more weeks. The contestants thus far are varied and plentiful…

One reckoner raised a hand for “Arnie Schwarzen-begger”…while another voted for the terminator’s entire state of California. Utah and Alaska also received state dishonors. And then…

“My vote goes to the US Government and the ‘man of the year’ helicopter Ben,” opined another reader. “Though to be fair, he didn’t do it alone. No man could have. It took Alan and Henry and Tim and countless other arrogant men to get to that place in time where you could financially cripple a whole world.

“Mostly it took the American people themselves who got so caught up in their TV shows and their high standard of living that they did not notice the biggest heist in the history of the world, taking place in plain view! It’s as though someone walked into their living rooms and started methodically removing all of their things and they didn’t even notice. The thieves are about to unplug the TV. It should be interesting to see what happens.”

At a quick glance, the “.govs” have it by a long shot over the “.orgs” and the “.coms”…but the votes keep comin’. Could it simply be a case of too many clowns and not enough circuses?

“I nominate Barnes Banking of Kaysbille Utah for the Darwin Award,” writes another reader. “They have recently been taken over by the State and the FDIC.”

Horizon Bank, based in Bellingham, Washington (to which we assume the reader is referring) may be extinct, but is it really uniquely reckless? Being taken over by the FDIC seems awfully like “resume padding” for these Darwin Awards. After all, this IS a depression. Competition is stiff. And just as every hopeful employee cites “conversational [restaurant] Spanish” or “enjoys traveling,” on their curriculum vitae, so can a laundry list of banks claim being absorbed by the FDIC as a buffer qualification. Last year alone 171 lenders fell into the federal insurer’s arms…then the FDIC itself went broke! It seems even lending money to people who can’t or won’t ever repay it doesn’t set one bank apart from the others.

There were plenty of nominations for individuals, too. One reader from Virginia submitted the following list of dedicated devolutionists…

“The incomparable John Thain, formerly of Merrill Lynch, who worried more about decorating his office than guiding his firm…

“Robert Nardelli, value destroyer extraordinaire, first at Home Depot and later at Chrysler, whose focus was solely on negotiating generous separation packages for himself…

“Chuck Prince at Citigroup, who couldn’t stop dancing while the music played, and is probably still dancing…

Impressive as the nominations have been so far, we’re really looking for an idiot to stand above the rest. These are competitive times indeed. It will take a truly prize moron to stand atop this bunch.