Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Day 4, Thursday: In Which We Enter My Dietary Wheelhouse

Gah! Did a bunch of Dorothy-Lynch related research last night after posting and I'm horrified to find that it's still around! People like it 'cause it's fat-free! The fat was the only thing it had going for it...

Anyway, on to the heart of the matter. The reason why you're here and I'm here. The big reveal.... What did I eat on this day?

Breakfast: Now. We are really getting into my wheelhouse. The very heart of my preferred way to eat. This is why I laugh at anyone who insists we're all meant to be vegetarian. NOTHING. And I mean NOTHING. Makes me feel like a bigger CHAMPION. Than eating the following for breakfast:

TURKEY BURGER WITH RAINBOW CHARD.

I know, I know, it's not really breakfast food, so I'm sort of breaking my own rule. But I imagine the turkey burger is kind of a patty (like breakfast sausage!) and I remind myself of the spinach in Eggs Florentine, and somehow I've managed to convince myself that this is breakfast food. It helps that the chard and the burger are both pretty bland. The first time I tried this I was 23 years old. A woman I worked with said she had taken to eating a TB for breakfast and felt great. I was skeptical--I knew this woman to be truly, tragically mentally ill, and it didn't help that she, in fact, had a history of anorexia. But I tried it. And even then I was BLOWN AWAY by how INCREDIBLY alert, clear-headed, steady, and upbeat I felt, leaving for the subway in the morning with a turkey burger under my belt. Then, caught up in the hurly-burly of my twenties in the big city, I forgot about it. I did some disastrous flirting with vegetarianism and green smoothies for breakfast before I finally returned to my true home, TB.

Here, a word about green smoothies. Everyone in yogaland talks about green smoothies. "Green smoothies are so tasty and nutritious!" "Green smoothies are so easy to whip up in my [vitamix, magic bullet, dishwasher--insert appliance here]!" "Green smoothies are cuter than puppies!" "Green smoothies cured my cancer!" Not actually joking about that last one. I enjoy green smoothies. But every time I made them for breakfast (and I tried 'em a bunch of different ways), I would get sick to my stomach immediately and unfortunate digestive sequelae within 20 minutes. Screw that! Sticking to my TB.

Lunch: smoked salmon, purple onion, a bit of goat cheese, tomato, lemon, salt. Here in New Jersey we are all obsessed with bagels. And for very good reason! When I was growing up in Kansas, a bagel was a frozen item about three inches in diameter. Then I moved to the Tri-state area and learned how majestic a bagel really can be. Toasted, with a schmear of cream cheese, accompanied by a large orange juice--heavenly! And SUGARY.

When I moved to New Jersey and started hanging out with Jewish people, I was introduced to the concept of bagels and lox. Oh, how I pity my young midwestern self, growing up without bagels and lox! It's not just the bagels and lox that makes bagels and lox so fabulous. It's the cream cheese, the capers, the red onion, the tomato that go WITH the bagel and lox. I don't do so well with cow milk dairy, so back when I was eating bagels I would substitute soft goat cheese (this is a pretty good substitution if you get bland goat cheese). Now as a Paleo eater, I've realized that when you have so many accoutrements to the bagel, you can ELIMINATE the bagel. Or at least I can, and still be happy.

Dinner: with mah gals, takeout from Arturo's, which is the best restaurant in South Orange/Maplewood, in my opinion. Sauteed kale and salads with tomatoes, prosciutto (pronounced "prushoot" in New Jersey), mozzarella (pronounced "mootsarelle"), etc. My dining companions also shared a pizza. I avoided the pizza, and then at the end of the night, the hostess invited me to take home the remaining salads. "What, is everyone done with the salads?" I asked. "I'm not taking them home. I'll eat the rest right now!"

Late night snack: apple and almond butter. Dumb idea. Should have gone to bed. One thing I realized on the Sugar Detox is that I'm not hungry late at night because I'm hungry. I'm hungry because I'm TIRED. So if I eat a snack, I end up staying up late. Then I oversleep the next morning.