What is a Haven? (And How Do You Create One?)

Everyone longs for a haven. But what IS a haven? And how can you create one?

Haven. Just the word makes me smile.

When I think of a haven, I think of a safe place. Comfort in the midst of a storm. A welcoming harbor.

Havens protect. When entering a haven, your soul finds refreshment. You feel a sense of belonging. You’re wanted and nurtured.

Havens can be people. You feel safest with them. They understand you like no one else; rarely do you have to explain why you’re thinking what you’re thinking, because they just know. You long to spend time with them.

Homes aren’t always havens, though. And havens aren’t created automatically. Just because you happen to live in a place doesn’t instantly transform it into a haven.

And just because you exist, doesn’t make you a haven for others.

No, havens typically are the product of a lot of thought and energy. They’re not randomly cobbled together, but thoughtfully and intentionally created.

Creating a haven

As you’re creating a haven in both your life and your home, it’s important to keep a few basics in mind:

First of all, havens are welcoming.

Like it or not, your attitude is a dead giveaway, the thermometer of exactly how welcoming you are. Are you cool and standoffish? Distracted and distant? Or are you friendly and cheerful?

Just as you need to be welcoming, your home does, too.

Another thing to thoughtfully consider is how you’re investing in others. Do you make time for others? Are you building into their lives and thoughtfully learning more about them? Do you accept who they are with grace, while gently pointing them to the Lord? Do you give yourself grace, or do your expectations put others on edge?

Smell

Sound

What does my home sound like? Is it filled with noise and interruptions? Or can I quiet things down or add some inviting music?

Touch

What does my home feel like? Is everything stark and bare? Or does it include different textures? Are there soft blankets to offer, or rugs to cushion feet?

When I step back from my home and try to look at it as a stranger, it’s easier to see what needs added – or taken away. And when I try to look at my own life as others see me, I can find how I need to change to become a warmer, more welcoming woman.

By focusing on these four senses, and keeping a welcoming attitude, you can start the process of transforming your home (and yourself!) into a haven that can nurture yourself and others.

For you, what is a haven? What makes a person or a place feel like a haven?

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About Hilary

Hilary Bernstein is a Christ follower, wife, homeschooling mama, and writer who believes every Christian woman can transform her home into a haven. She loves laughing, getting handwritten letters, hosting friends and family for dinner, going on date nights with her husband, singing along to the radio while driving her kids around, and relaxing on family vacations at the beach. The author of several eBooks, Hilary loves to encourage her e-mail subscribers!