I was diagnosed with advanced breast cancer in December 2005. I spent 2006 getting surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation therapy. In August 2007, my cancer came back. In February 2008, I learned the cancer had spread to my brain, liver, lungs, and bones. I live in Singapore with my husband Tony, daughter Josie (born Feb. 2003), and son Toby (born July 2005). Thanks to all of you who are still reading and commenting on my blog.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

A much overdue update

I'm amazed at the immediate response we received from Shin's birthday post. I figured that I've been so negligent in updating that no one must follow it anymore. But immediately a wave of support hit me. Many thanks. Life gets busy and I suspected that Shin and this blog's readers would have forgiven me for not updating so well. But I realize I owe at least a basic update.

Firstly, Josie and Toby are just great. they are both in school full time now. Josie sees herself as an avid reader just like her mom. Toby is wonderfully affectionate. Both seem secure and balanced with the loss of their mom. We talk about Shin frequently, but both Josie and Toby seem to be able talk about her happily. My mother, Carol, has retired from nursing in the US and is with us most of the time. Carol has other grandkids in Boston, US, that she spends some time with, but she has definitely given a maternal stability for Josie and Toby. Our helper Elisa, who has been with us since Toby was born, has been very dedicated in helping to bring up Josie and Toby. I personally feel pride that our family has faced difficulty, but pulled together for the sake of the kids, who so far are doing well.

I am doing well. At times I can dwell on how much I feel Shin has lost out on. I see the wonderful things Josie and Toby have done this past year and multiply that times 20. My heart aches for her loss. On the other hand, I know it would help put Shin at piece knowing we are doing well, and i'm confident she would be happy.

On to the photos!

We went to Boston in May and had a chance to catch up with my brother. Here are some photos from Fenway Park, home of my beloved Red Sox:

And here is a photo of when Josie and I dressed up to go to the Symphony:

And here are some photos of our recent trip to the Philippines. With Josie in a Jeepnee, and with her grandfather, Toby in the pool and making a face:

Finally, her is a photo of Josie going to school on "Hero" day. On Hero day the children do not have to where their uniforms, they can dress as a hero. Josie put on one of Shin's shirts, put on her ID badge, her necklase and bracelets and went to school as her "Hero":

Yikes! I've been trying for any hour and just can't get the text to line up with the photos. I'll trust readers can figure out what i'm trying to say.

Hi Tony, very glad to know that you and the kids and your mum are doing fine. Is somehow "Great" to know that you still feel ache for the loss of Shin because that show you still miss her a lot and still think of her and is ok as long as that is positive kind of ache. I think that is good that you express that for that is a good way of releasing your ache too.

I am sure there are still many who still visit Shin/your blog here and we are patiently waiting for your updates knowing that you will do so when you are free.

Thank you so much for such a lovely positive update...Shin would be rightfully very proud of all you have achieved as a family...the strength and determination you have shown is EXACTLY what she hoped for and something we spoke at great lengths about...I commend you all and am so honoured to have you as part of my life xxx

Am glad the kids are doing well! Thank you for sharing and updating.And yes! I am always visiting this site sometimes just to read Shin's post all over again.You take care and update whenever you are able to...knowing you have to work n taking care of the kids.

Hi Tony, I was just thinking about Shin the other day and how time flies. Can't believe it's been 10 months since Shin left. Thought I would check up on this blog today, and was pleasantly surprised to see your latest 2 postings and the lovely pictures. I would like to wish Shin a "HAPPY Belated 43rd Birthday!". She must be very happy and pleased that you and the kids are doing well. Take care and best wishes to you and all at home...Ida

Hi Tony,I'm just now checking the blog - it's so wonderful to hear the latest and see the fantastic pics of you and the kids. I miss you guys. Please let me know next time you're planning to be on the East Coast. I travel there pretty frequently and would love to try to meet you at some point. Sending you lots of love and kisses.Always,Marge

Dear Tony,I learn about Shin's blog from my friend's blog link...Your wife is beautiful inside and out and your 2 kids are lovely! I'm sure they give you a lot of strength and by having your mother does help as well!You are doing so well for Shin, your kids and yourself... I hope you continue to shine and glow together with your kids...Happy 2010 and may a new year bring magic into your family!

I stumbled upon this blogsite via a breast cancer link last year. I am a breast cancer survivor, as well as a daughter of a breast cancer survivor. The picture of Josie dressed as Shin, her Hero, brought tears to my eyes. I'm 32 years old, and I still see my mother as my hero. You have a beautiful family, keep up the good work.

The kids are looking so well Tony, you are doing such a great job. I love the photos of the balloons and seeing you and the children adding them to her everlasting collection of balloons with each milestone like her birthday. Our thoughts are with you during this time of year.

Tony, I read this once before but tears still come up when I read the blog. So glad that Josie chose Shin as her "herp" - I would have too and it makes me so happy that Josie accepts her Mom as the hero that she was. Happy Birthday Shin!!

I really understand that life can be hard, sad and overwhelming. By getting through each day one at a time and by finding some support, I really think there will be a day you will be happy with your perseverance through the sad times.

Hi shin, seen the tv program yesterday very touched by yr strong will and support fr husband and mother in law.I came across this website while browsing the internet about cancer cure hope you might find it useful.

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About Me

I was born in South Korea in 1966. My family immigrated to the U.S. when I was eight years old (I'm now a U.S. citizen). We lived in Nashville, Tennessee and New Jersey. I went to college in New York City, worked as a schoolteacher in Indiana and Philadelphia, and as a legal assistant in New York. I worked as a reporter in Seoul, South Korea and as a TV news producer and Internet news editor in Singapore. I've lived in Korea, U.S., France, and Singapore. My favorite travels have been to Peru, Belize, Botswana, Zimbabwe, and Zambia. My proudest moment is now. My least proud moments are too many to list. My happiest moments are now. My unhappiest moments are too few and too unimportant to remember.