But I spoke too soon! Apparently North West has either taken the trend-setting baby crown from Blue Ivy, or Otis is an infant after all (I knew it!), because he did in fact make a little tinkle on the Roberto Cavalli gown that Olivia was wearing while feeding him.

I mean yeah, that makes sense to me. Of course he peed on the dress. If you had the life of a baby and were able to eat, (essentially) sleep, and pee at the same time, wouldn’t you do that ALL THE TIME? I would. That would be the best. I wish I was a baby.

But anyway, maybe we should start wrapping these kids up, yeah? I get that there’s nothing overtly fashionable about a diaper (believe me, I have tried), but isn’t it slightly more trendy than getting peed on? I happen to think it’s quite chic to wear a ball gown without any excrement on it, but that’s just me. A fashion rube.

And even if you don’t mind pee, we’re lucky it wasn’t worse, right? I mean, I’m not gonna get into it, because this is a family movie, but BABIES GO NUMBER TWO ALSO. SOMETIMES KIND OF EXPLOSIVELY. (Seems like I kind of did get into it — sorry.) You do you, Glamour, but if it’s between a kid wearing an Armani diaper and having an intern steam baby poop off a multi-thousand dollar dress, I’ma pick that diaper every time.