To Pursue, or Not to Pursue? That is the Question

It’s relationships week at project and the subject of “proj crushes” has substantially shifted in meaning. Relationships week is devoted to discussing what it means to be in a Christ-centered community with mixed genders. There’s a guy-girl breakout session where the girls can ask questions on how we are supposed to love our brothers in Christ while guys ask questions on how to pursue loving relationships with women. The number one thing that is stressed throughout the week is the constant need of Christ and how He is our first and only love. The only way to be in a God-honoring relationship is to allow Christ to be our foundation.

However, many people aren’t used to hearing about what Christ-centered relationships look like. Project crushes have already developed and genders have been responding differently to the messages have been given throughout the week. The boys are second guessing themselves; “Is she the type of woman I can spend the rest of my life with? In what ways may I be leading her on? What does my community have to say about this?” The ladies, on the other hand, have their own questions; “Will he pursue me after project or during? Is he a spiritual leader? Can he articulate the gospel? I just really want him to pursue me!”

It’s interesting to watch the guy-girl dynamic of project change as feelings of opposite genders are being… revealed (notice the ‘revealed theme’ pun). But in all seriousness, I think we have all learned a lot this week. Eric and Holly Lonergan gave the two-part relationships talk on Monday and Tuesday. I was left with a lot of time to process what it means to be in a Christ-centered relationship.

Growing up in a conservative, Christian home, a lot of my focus has been on finding a good, Christian boy who can lead me in my faith. Throughout my life, my mindset has been to “be pure for my future husband.” I believe that it is good to live a pure life, but the more I learn about God, the more I see how I can’t live a pure life.

God is my Purity. He is my Righteousness. He is my Love. He is my Pursuer. My focus has always been on living for my future husband instead of living for my Savior. As I fall in love with Jesus the subject of relationships possesses a whole new meaning. No longer am I living for a future husband, but for the Creator of the universe. God has been revealing to me the blessing of my brothers in Christ and how to see them as His children instead of potential suitors. I look forward to hearing how God has changed the hearts of others as they learn more about Jesus and His gift of relationships.