Guilt is destructive. It impedes our
progress and inhibits our own destinies in this life. We
spend our time berating ourselves for where we perceive
failure instead of focusing on all the good we achieved,
the quality of life we brought to our loved ones and the
character development that ensued as a result. The best
knowledge we can possess is that our efforts made a
difference in the last days of our loved ones. There is
no easy remedy for guilt. No magic formula we can use to
erase it from our being. At best, it is an ongoing
process, one that we must practice every day so that we
can successfully eradicate guilt from our lives. We have
to look in the mirror and confidently tell ourselves
that we have done the best we were able to do. Given the
tools we had to work with, we used our best judgement,
and made caregiving decisions that we truly felt were in
the best interest of all concerned.

It takes discipline to focus on the attainment of a
higher level of living for all of us as the mortal bonds
are broken. However, our loved ones live on in our
hearts forever and those eternal bonds remain. The
memories can be used to comfort us that much sooner if
only we can cast off the guilt that simply clouds our
vision and torments our minds. Peace then comes as we
realize and acknowledge that there was purpose to all we
shared. The lessons learned change us and equip us to
better empathize with those who follow after along our
paths of experience. Release the guilt you carry and
listen with your heart. You will truly find your loved
ones not only dwell in peace, but wish the same for you
as well.

Dorothy Womack was caregiver to
her mother for 14 years. Send comments to
kate@caregiver.com further reproduction by written
permission only.