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Need advice and opinions...

So im still having a goos amount of nipple pain. I wanted to atleast breastfeed to three months and my DD is not 11 weeks so i am almost there. I want ro wean her from the breast because i cannot handle the constant pain anymore. See other threads for more information. Ive tried everything. I was wondering what is the best way to go about this. I would like to still give her breastmilk atleast half of the time. Im afraid pumping all feedings will be too time consuming because i am home alone with my daughter all day. I do not understand how this will be possible. I double pump so i need both hands. How can i take care of her and still pump because she does not always like being put down if i have something to do. Im thinking it would be easier to just wean fully and give her formula all the time. Please give me some advice. I know most woman here are totally pro breastfeeding but i hope i can get some good advice or encouragement. If weaning fully how wouls i go about that? Cold turkey?

Re: Need advice and opinions...

Oh, mama, I am so sorry that you've come to this point! I know- from experience!- how draining and dispiriting the constant pain can be, and I can totally understand why so many mamas get to the point where they decide they need to give up on some aspect of their breastfeeding dream.

I think you have hit the nail exactly on the head with your questions about how to combine pumping and baby care. It is SO difficult! What do you do when you must choose between maintaining your pumping schedule and ability to feed baby breastmilk, and caring for your baby? Do you pump or let your baby cry because she's hungry or wet or lonely? It's this dilemma that explains why when a mom comes here asking for advice on how to exclusively pump (EP) we always encourage her to explore every alternative and giving breastfeeding some time before making that choice.

I think you actually have some possibilities that might combine the best of both worlds (i.e. nursing and pumping). The first would be to mostly pump and bottle-feed, but to keep the baby on the breast for one or two feedings per day. The second possibility would be to mostly combination feed (some amount of bottled breastmilk, some of formula) and nurse just a few times a day. So many nursing problems go away with time, as the baby grows bigger and her mouth grows bigger. If you nurse her just a couple of times a day, you won't have to face constant pain and she is more likely to retain her ability and willingness to breastfeed. If you ever decide that you want to transition back to exclusive nursing, or just more nursing and fewer bottles, then keeping the baby at the breast part-time may help you do that. And I know- again from experience- that babies can outgrow their latch problems and that you can go back to exclusively breastfeeding and to enjoying it even if you thought breastfeeding was the most awful, painful thing you ever did in your life!

If you decide to mostly or exclusively pump, then as you know you're going to face some tough choices when it comes to balancing pumping and baby care. But EP is possible and lots of moms do it! You will need a really good pump- a Medela Pump in Style or equivalent is kind of the minimum, and a lot of moms have better results with a hospital-grade rental. You'll want to set up a system with bottles and pump parts, because believe me, the constant washing up can be almost more wearying than the pumping! One thing that helped me when I was EPing was to wash the pump parts only every other time. I would pump, leave the horns attached to the bottle of just-pumped milk, and pop the whole thing in the fridge. The next time it was time to pump, I'd use the same set-up again- and my LC said it was totally safe to pump new milk on top of old, as long as you did it just once. When it came to washing bottles, I kept a big basin full of soapy water next to the sink, and threw used bottles in as the day passed. That way I could do one big wash-up per day, rather than a thousand little ones. The final thing you'll need to decide on is your pumping schedule. There's no one schedule that works for every mom. I think you need to balance your need for milk against your ability to carry the workload... So again, that's really individual. But I suggest that you start by trying to pump about as often as your baby nurses, and see how much you get.

Now, if you decide to wean, you really shouldn't do it cold turkey. You're nursing an 11 week-old baby, whose demand for milk is really high. Maybe as high as it will ever be! Which means that your supply is really abundant right now. If you quit cold turkey, you're likely to get engorged and maybe end up with something nasty like a plugged duct or mastitis. The key to successful weaning is to go slow. Drop one nursing or pumping session, replace that feeding with a bottle, wait a few days for your supply to decrease, and then drop another, etc. It may take a few weeks to be completely done, but going slow is really preferable to getting sick. Another thing you'll need to do if you choose to wean completely is to find out if your baby will take formula- has your baby had any yet? Some babies don't like it and won't drink it, but you can usually overcome that hurdle by offering mixed breastmilk-formula bottles and gradually increasing the amount of formula in the bottles and decreasing the amount of breastmilk until your baby is willing to take a 100% formula bottle.

Re: Need advice and opinions...

Thank you so much for ur response. Right now she sleeps about 8 hours straight at night. I would love to do about 50/50. Nurse half and bottle feed half. She does take formula on weekends and it seems to be going good. I would hate to wean her unless i have to. My problem with pumping is my pump. I have a playtex one and it works okay on weekends but ive noticed it doesnt get it all out and i get engorged within a few hours. I cannot afford a better pump but i will be calling my insurance because i think after the first of the year i get one for free or at a good discount. If i did pump i would definately nurse part time for the reasons you stated. I do hope her latch issues resolve in time. She nurses every few hours during the day except for the eight hour stretch at nite. When would be a good time to nurse or feed? During the day or night. Right now i sleep during the night and i do not wake her or pump during that time.

Re: Need advice and opinions...

BTW the pain did get better for awhile and the latch was fixed. It got worst again when she started to teeth. She fusses and fights at the breast sometimes popping on and off. She throws her arms and legs around and her head never stays still causing the pain. Her latch went back to being shallow again despite everything i try. If we do get a good one she moves like crazy making it shallow again.

Re: Need advice and opinions...

I think you should either wake her at night to nurse or get up and pump. I know that's probably not what you wanted to hear, but at this age, it's not typical for babes to sleep through the night and I'm guessing going all night without emptying your breasts is having a negative effect on your supply.

I'd really encourage you to try nursing at night rather than pumping. Mainly because a lot of babies who refuse the breast when fully awake will take it when they are mostly asleep. Dream feeding gets a lot of mamas through nursing strikes without drying up. But also because if you can get her to nurse it would have more of a supply boosting effect than pumping.

“We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
--Anonymous

Re: Need advice and opinions...

I will try to wake her at night because the other night i tried to pump and she woke hungry half an hour after i was done. I pumped to try and build my stock but that did not work. I am actually seeing my LC for support group on friday so i hope she can help.