And We Wonder Why We’re Hated

Havens Corners Church in Blacklick, Ohio (just outside of Columbus) is getting a little flack for their sign out front. Borrowing from Katy Perry’s hit song “I Kissed A Girl,” the sign reads:

I KISSED A GIRL

AND I LIKED IT

THEN I WENT TO HELL

“Last time I checked, there were more references in the Bible on how to love your neighbor than on how not to love them.”

Dave Allison, pastor of Havens Corners, thinks the sign is a “loving warning to teens.” He told The Columbus Dispatch that “The Scriptures tell us that you should not do what the song tells you to do. The Scriptures are not ambiguous on this issue.”

It appears that Dave is forgetting that the Scriptures are also not ambiguous on how you’re supposed to treat people. Last time I checked, there were more references in the Bible on how to love your neighbor than on how not to love them.

Brad Abare

Brad Abare is the founder of the Center for Church Communication. He consults with companies and organizations, helping them figure out why in the world they exist, why anyone should care and what to do about it. He and his wife Jamaica live in Los Angeles with their daughter, Miró.

29 Responses to “And We Wonder Why We’re Hated”

I couldn’t agree more. These signs are getting a lot of churches in trouble simply because people don’t think long enough before they put something on there. I believe there’s a book of bad church signs… this should be included in volume 2.

I understand the idea behind the message, though I don’t agree that is the best way or even a good way to share such a hot-bed message. The church’s website talks about growing the church and reaching the community and that is done through love and building relationships. Once those relationships are built then you can help people realize the sin they are living in. I am 100% for standing with scripture against homosexuality, though I doubt that anyone living in that sin will ever listen to anyone from that church. That’s sad.

In Exodus 20, we’re told not to take the name of the Lord in vain. In the Hebrew, it essentially means we shouldn’t carry the name of the Lord if we aren’t going to walk his way. God says he will not hold those who take his name in vain guiltless.
Essentially, if you’re a Christian, you damn well better act like it.
I’m not sure God really instructs us to publicly proclaim the sins of others. So I’m not sure this sign is really a good idea.
The rest of us end up carrying the baggage of being called a Christian in the negative context because of this kind of shaming crap.
I say this in love, knowing that God wants believers to be refiners for each other.

Colt, as per my usual I can’t find which verse it is, but in regards to your statement: “I’m not sure God really instructs us to publicly proclaim the sins of others.”
This isn’t the only verse one can bring to bear on this topic, but there is the verse about when someone has sinned against you to go to them privately. Then if they don’t acknowledge it you go again with an authority. And if that still doesn’t work you bring it before the entire assembly. Coarse, this is about other believers though.

We sometimes do think that we are so dominant that we bring out hate in people. Rather, I see many just ignoring us, not thinking about us or our messages, not even going through the human act of judging us to be irrelevant. And if they notice us and our signs of presumed dominance they consider us to be a fleeting curiosity out of the past and then move on.

There’s a fine line here. Yes, that song promotes a lifestyle of sin. Culture promotes that song and that lifestyle. We need to speak out against sin; lesbians, liars and cheats alike. If that sign was abrasive about your shoes or your mom’s weight that might be one thing. But we’re talking about sin and eternity (I hope that’s what we’re talking about).
I agree that the sign is rough. But you know what, that church is taking a stand. A stand against the sin that is celebrated in that popular song. You all know that the intent of that sign is just this.. discussion and investigation. PR.
I would hope that their service that followed the display of that sign was filled with a loving spirit of truth. I hope that the miracle of Jesus was preached.

I have no problem with the sign as long as the display is updated in a few weeks with “I KISSED A GIRL” replaced by “I DIVORCED MY WIFE AND REMARRIED ANOTHER WOMAN”.
Only, if the church really believes it needs to take a stand on unambiguous issues

So… was there some sort of sermon series behind this sign or are these guys just good friend with the whole godhatesfags.com movement? The message of that song is clearly not biblical, but we should also remember that when she did the song it was only after she spend years getting utterly rejected by professionals in the Christian music industry. That’s a real shame.

BIBLE DARTS! WHOO HOO! My favorite. Can I throw some?Galatians 6:1
Brothers, if anyone is caught in any
transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of
gentleness.1 Peter 3:13-17
Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect,

Interesting. The first thing that comes to my mind is how is that going to motivate people to come into the church. I think it shows one of the most common problems in the church today. We define ourselves by what we do not do istead of what we do do.

Grossly sadistic. It’s frightening that so many Christians out there seem to really enjoy the thought of sending other people to Hell.
Go to a heavy metal concert and you’ll quickly find out just how many people out there are a lot more comfortable with the idea of going to Hell than going to church. Heart-breaking, to say the least, but sentiments like this leave little question as to why.

I’m with TL.
I personally come down on the side of thinking that homosexuality is not sinful.
But for those who believe it is: is the point to shun gays and lesbians or to reach into their heart and change them? Signs like this only serve to shun people. And basic marketing concepts should tell us that if you want to attract a new client, you DON’T start off the relationship by calling them a worthless evil schmuck.

As someone who is a gay Christian, I totally think the song is un-Christian because it promotes promiscuity.
The lyrics are:I kissed a girl, and I liked it,
No, my boyfriend doesn’t mind it
Any Christian, in my opinion, should either be faithful in celibacy or faithful in partnership. But, hey, that’s my opinion.
Speaking as a gay Christian, though, the sign is tactless and would turn me away from their doors in a heartbeat.

If the Bible still teaches that homosexuality is sin and sin unrepented of still ends one in hell then I guess the sign is simply preaching truth… not poular… not politically correct, but Kingdom correct. Sure they could have chosen adultery, murder, stealing but they seem to have chosen to leave those subjects to those of you that are to afraid of taking on such an ever increasingly popular trend among the youth in America. You guys stick to the stuff that will keep you safe. These guys are hitting the stuff that others simply fear to take a stand against. And If what they have said in their sign shows hate, then the Word of God is very or even extremely hateful.

This is the kind of CRAP that we, as loving, grace-filled Church leaders and Christians, have to try to counter and defend. This is no way to start a conversation. We should be trying to start conversations, build relationship and love one another – not debate. Thanks for bringing this to light, Brad.

I like what Mark Batterson said in his book – In a pit with a lion..
He says “I think the church (in general) has fixated on sins of commision for far too long. we have a long list of don’ts. We think of it as holiness by subtraction. We think holiness is the byproduct of subtracting something from our lives that shouldnt be there. I think God is more concerned about sins of omission (those things we should have done) rather than sins of comission.(regrets of something you have done).
Josh

Why stop with just one church sign? How about another that says ‘I ate too much at Waffle House. Then I went to Hell.” Or ‘I lusted over the Victoria’s Secret commercial…I cheated on my taxes…I divorced & remarried without Biblical grounds…the list could go on and on.
God’s concept of abomination is different than ours. The same God who calls homosexuality an abomination says the same of eating pork & shellfish. Its a shame when we mistreat those struggling with sexual sin, but tolerate gluttony and other sins.
Since we’re discussing this as a marketing issue, marketing affects the public’s perception of the organization/company in question. My perception of that church is quite negative as a result.