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I want wireless unmetered internet in my head

On Friday I did get up and went to Shinjuku. It was raining heavily. I successfully found my way out of the station, and went to eat in the good revolving sushi restaurant in Kabuki-cho, staffed by nice Koreans who didn't understand the European custom of getting your head and outer clothing soaked and so gave me a cheap nylon umbrella. Very friendly.

I then wondered around in Kabuki-cho (one of Tokyo's literally filthiest districts, and also a red light area) and looked at the people buying and selling sex services unintuitively, which seems to be the purpose of "entertainment" areas all over Japan (to buy and sell sex, not to confuse me).

Eventually I went to a tiny strip club, which in fact is a perverse rather than a perverted form of entertainment. The music sounds at times like dogs chasing cats on samplers and at other times as if Andrew Lloyd Webber's team wrote lyrics for Pachelbel. The two young and energetic (althogh very tired) performers mostly dressed like schoolgirls or 60's space-vehicle crew and behaved like Duracell bunnies on speed. Occasionally they wore long desses and acted like princesses locked up in towers. When they actually took off their clothes, this was aesthetically pleasing (especially compared with the previous artistic experiments) rather than anything else. Rows of besuited Japanese men sat politely in the auditorium and clapped in time with the music or threw paper ribbons (provided) over the stage. There were sessions where the men could take polaroids of the women (camera provided) at various stages of undress and incredibly silly poses, for what looked like 10000 yen bills. This was again done very politely, with much smiling and bowing. In general, the women did their utmost to act like smiling, gesticulating automata, and appear to have no brain whatsoever. The Japanese men seemed to feel comfortable with this. Nihon-no bunka wakarimassen...

So, I want wireless internet in my head to tell you all this interesting stuff, which I'm sure you wanted to know, as it goes through my mind. I don't want much bandwidth, but I would like some sort of wired interface so that I don't have to manipulate a hand-held device. Tricky. I bet they'll invent it, but you'd have to have been fitted with an implant at a few days old in order for it to grow attahed to your brain.

The day generally lacked the emotional balance or little sparks of warmth that make a day good. There was no sunshine through the clouds, no trees sparking with the rain drops, no charming scenes acted by stranges on the street. Better luck tomorrow.