Today begins a new chapter in our quest as we tackle the world of startup investing. Until recently, only venture capital firms and the very wealthy could invest in hot startups before they went public. The average investor was left on the sidelines.

But now it’s finally becoming legal for ordinary investors to buy into promising startup business before they hit the public markets. We smell opportunity.

Everyone’s heard of the Teslas and Facebooks of the world. But who’s heard of UnBurden, High Energy, or Park Slope Pizza Society?

No one. That’s why we created Motley Fools Rush In — to help shed light on tomorrow’s next big winners. Rush In makes startup investing fast and easy.

Park Slope Pizza Society

Outside of lame attempts at stuffing crusts and novel-but-barely-edible toppings, pizza has been undisrupted in the last century. That ends now.

Remember, Chipotle didn’t invent the burrito. It just disrupted it. And their success made early-stage investors rich. Park Slope Pizza Society is the next hot fast casual dining concept, and we need your help to fund our expansion beyond the Sheboygan, WI metropolitan area. Here are just a few of the things we’re doing:

Quality — Good pizza takes a good long time. Forget 30 minutes or less — we don’t even start on your pizza within 30 minutes! This gives our sauciers and crustaceans time to marinate on making a pie that’s custom-built to your tastes.

Self-Delivery — We put you in the driver’s seat. For just $1 per item, you personally execute the logistics of delivering your pie from pickup to plate.

Variable pricing — Like the best airlines and hotels, we vary pricing on factors such as time of day, channel, prior transaction data, and imputed willingness to pay. Prices range from $30 to $85 per pie for non-Tesla, non-Prius owners. While our methodology is a trade secret, our pizza ambassadors will make the process seamless.

Click the heart if you’re excited about our business and look forward to watching it grow into a national chain!

Edgar Jonas Financial Services

We’re facing a retirement crisis. Americans are too confused about how much to save, and too busy to meet with a financial advisor.

But the computers at Edgar Jonas Financial Services offer a solution: make investing easy and automatic.

Consumers swipe their credit card without even thinking about it. Why should saving for retirement be any harder?

With Edgar Jonas’ Round-Up program, every time one of our clients purchases a product with their debit or credit card, we round up the purchase to the nearest $1 and invest the difference on their behalf in one of our high-fee mutual funds.

We win, because we keep our clients invested in Edgar Jonas’ financial products.

Our shareholders (click the heart and that’s you!) win because the mutual funds guarantee they get paid.

Our 40,000 clients… probably won’t read the fund prospectuses.

We need investors to help us fund our move from physical servers into the cloud. This will allow us to sign up more clients. Once we become fully cloud-based, we anticipate a 1,154% jump in profits. And you will share in that growth with us. So click the heart here!

Loot — Owe a friend money? Get to the coffee shop and realize you don’t have your credit card? Don’t worry about downloading a money-transfer app like PayPal or Square. Use our network of cash drop boxes to “Loot” the money.

These are just a handful of our successful concepts. A heart click from you will help us provide millennial consumers a more robust lineup of authentic, niche brands to retweet, heart, and share.

High Energy

Energy is low these days. Oil has fallen from $120 a barrel to around $40, stock prices are down, and there’s no end in sight for the industry’s low energy crisis. How can we get energy back up?

We solved the 2009 banking crisis by motivating top banking talent with incentive bonuses. Then, during the recession, we needed to get corporate executives feeling better about the economy so they could start creating jobs. Today, low energy in the boardrooms of oil drillers is holding our economy back.

High Energy is a premium line of energy drinks marketed to the oil and gas drilling and services industries. There’s nothing commoditized about our beverage; we have pricing independence and no energy beverage cartel looking over our shoulder. Our ingredients are sourced from only the highest-quality Hong Kong ginseng farms, Brazilian guarana vineyards, and Portuguese Taurine ruminants.

Customers pay top-dollar for our elite beverage. They understand that every 1% bump to CEO energy flows through to 1% higher shareholder profits.

So far, we’ve primarily serviced a niche market of small-time wildcatters located in the Eagle Ford Shale. But our market research indicates strong untapped demand among larger pipeline operators and even a few maritime oil majors. We need your support to bring High Energy to the next level.

Low energy doesn’t have to be our future. Click the heart to help get America drilling again.

Mary Jay

You’ve heard of those multi-level, door-to-door marketing companies…and heck, chances are good that, due to social pressure or your deadbeat cousin finally getting a job with one of them, you’ve bought knives, perfume, or protein powder from them too.

This is mostly stuff nobody wants, but you forked over the cash for it. And that’s for a simple reason: Direct selling works. But it would work even better if you were selling something people really want. Like weed.

At Mary Jay, we’re ready to bring marijuana to households across America using a multi-level marketing structure more aggressive than that popularized by Cutco and Tupperware.

Here’s how we’ll do it:

The root of the matter — start with the highest-quality locally-sourced, organic marijuana, hand-crafted in small batches in micro-farms across the Americas

UnBurden

We’re all busy. We have relationships, careers, and possibilities to pursue.

Time is more precious than ever, so no one should waste their lives with boring, hard, or uncomfortable tasks. Standing in line. Breaking up with your girlfriend. Talking to your mother on the phone. Reading to your kids. That group jazzercise class your office is forcing you to take. We can do it all without sacrificing our careers.

UnBurden’s task-sharing platform frees up our users to pursue their life’s ambitions. Here are just a few of the services our contractors provide:

Nannify — Raising children can be one of the most time-consuming and stressful jobs. Our contractors provide your kids a loving and mentally stimulating environment so you can focus on your career.

The Uber of Fitbit — Treat yourself to our surrogate exercise service. Win that Fitbit competition with your friends from the comfort of your couch!

Breakup Blowoff — Breaking up shouldn’t be so awkward. Lame relationships are bad enough without the hassle of crafting that final text message. Fortunately, our breakup buddies are here to help — they’ll do it for you while you celebrate your newfound freedom!

Demand is strong. Our only problem: We have more ideas than money. Your capital will enable us to add picking up dog poop, attending your niece’s cello recital, and meeting future in-laws to our stable of services. Click the heart if you’re ready to help fund this venture of the future!

Shkreli Springs’ Unleaded Water

Yo — you may remember as the guy who made millions as former CEO of Turing Pharmaceutical. In thinking about the principles of supply and demand, and how to capitalize on high demand, we asked: “what is the most necessary thing in life?” At first we thought “medicine!” Been there, done that. So that’s when we came up with the idea of our water business!

You watch the news lately? Water’s all over it.

Water: there’s a limited supply of it.

Water without lead: there’s even less of it.

My boys at Shkreli Springs buy up all the water suppliers and raise the price of unleaded water 100-fold or more, in essence capitalizing on the true demand in free markets.

We did it with drugs, now we can do it with water. Click like to invest in our water business.

Collaborize

You’ve spent years building it; it may be your greatest asset, and yet you can’t monetize it... until now. Collaborize empowers individuals by helping them collateralize their social capital. Using our proprietary social analytics system we turn street cred into Streetcred™.

Here’s how it works:

We analyze a client’s Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Instagram profiles to determine a value and quality rating for their social network.

Based on our rating, our client can solicit loans from marketers.

The client pays off the loan and maintains control of their accounts.

If a payment is over 30 days delinquent, the marketers can use a borrower’s personal accounts as a platform for their brand, posting their products to the borrower’s friends and family.

Most importantly, collaborize is a client-first business; we only get paid if our clients like their ratings. And the underlying assets are rock solid — what is more bankable than an individual’s digital connection to friends and family?

Collaborize wants to help everyone get access to credit… will you accept our friend request?

The Big Hedge

Wall Street bankers have made our lives miserable for too long — destroying good American jobs, ruining the economy, and then stealing billions from us through bailouts.

But we’ve found a simple way to fight back: We’re going to build a wall around Wall Street… and we’re going to make them pay for it!

We’re not going to actually charge them upfront, of course — that’s why we need an initial investment from folks like you — but we know how to monetize that wall.

First off, and most importantly, the wall has no door. No one can come in, and no one can leave.

Which is why we’ve invented our app, BankYourTime.
It’s like Seamless — for Investment Bankers.
They’re going to need food. Ties. New assets to tranche.
And we can deliver. For a fee, of course.
In lab testing, we achieved 100% uptake among captive consumers.
We conservatively project that we will be able to completely pay off the wall (turning all of that debt into equity) within five years.
Eventually we will scale our concept out beyond investment bankers (lawyers, insurance adjustors, multi-level marketing salespeople, and politicians are next on our list) — so there’s enormous opportunity to expand our markets.

Ultimately, we’re a social enterprise. Our goal is to make the world a better place (by removing the investment bankers from it) and turn a profit by doing so. This is your chance to invest with a company that seeks to do well by doing good.

It’s a match!

Thanks!

Thanks for your comments! Be sure to check Fool.com tomorrow to see how your investment is doing.

Sadface!

Tell what you don’t like about their idea. Any criticism is welcome!

Thanks!

Thanks for your comments! Be sure to check Fool.com tomorrow to see how your investment is doing.

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