Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Splitting up, Taking some time, Getting a breather, Sorting your thoughts, Figuring out who you are, Whatever you call it. It's never good. After spending 10 years together including ALL of your adulthood (so far) and all the "Firsts" you share with someone.... this shit is difficult.

It was my decision.

My decision to "wreck havoc" as my MIL in called it.My decision to "tear the family apart" as He called it.My decision to "make myself happy" as I call it.

It has been a couple days and the emotions are still very raw. I cry ALOT. My daughter saw me crying so she started crying.

But the odd part is that, it doesn't feel like I'm grieving. Does that make sense. I think I am more scared of the unknown.

Scared to shut the lights off at the end of the day knowing I have no one there to protect the kids or myself, besides myself.

9
comments:

...You have you to protect yourself. Install a good alarm and get good service for that alarm. Be vigilant of where you live and get to know your neighbors. You have your community. Even though they make you feel like crap right now (MIL), you have your family too.

...You have the RIGHT to be happy with your decision. You wouldn't have made it unless you thought it would make you both happier in the end.

...You WILL flourish. You SHOULD flourish. You need to be happy. This is what you're doing to ensure that. You'll be okay.

It's okay to be scared. It's natural, even - it's a good reaction to have. That means that you're still human and you're still worried about loss.

((hugs)) You'll make it, woman. You're a strong girl and this is just another storm to bear.

As you said, it was your decision to make yourself happy. So long as you don't let the chaos and ugly words (and actions) take that away from you, you will be fine. There will be days that you doubt your decision, and just make sure to have the moment that cemented your decision available to reflect on.

You have a big online support system here. So - eff the people in your RL that don't support you.

Hey....just an observation from the "other side".....I'm going through the same situation RIGHT NOW....have been since last august when my wife told me that she would like me to leave....she doesn't love me anymore......I was floored......but my situation isn't the point......He will be devestated...angry....confused & just downright out of his mind if our situations are at all similar...regardless....it does get better for YOU & for HIM.....lot's of emotions , but it DOES get better fot both people...it takes understanding, compation, and the ability to know when ya cannot really get away with murder !!! HA!!! Just a note to let ya know, your blog is worth whatching...thank you...be strong.....he will be too....

About Me

A facade. That's what it is. Never perfect, always loving. The realist of all realists. Sugarcoating is not in my DNA. I have NO regrets. Married. Mother of 2. I like to sew (which I am not very good at). Cooking is my specialty (which is what's hurting my weight loss efforts). Currently working on losing that weight, becoming a better mother, better wife and healing myself from the inside out. Oh yeah, and I cuss ALOT.