Saturday, December 15, 2012

Placing Blame…

Yesterday was one of those days that will live on throughout
our life, as we will never forget where we were when we heard the awful news.
There have been several in my life of almost 60 years. I can tell you where I
was when I heard that President Kennedy had been assassinated, the Challenger
exploded, and the planes hit the twin towers, Columbine, and now Sandy Hook
Elementary. Each of us has our own reaction to tragedy. Mine yesterday was
overwhelming grief. I work in a classroom of precious small children each day
and the events in Newtown were the nightmare of every teacher.

There seems to be a need to place blame when something like
this happens. We lose sight of the fact that a single mentally ill person
committed the unthinkable and that there was little any of us could have done
to prevent it. Sadly, the blamed are often family, coworkers, and first
responders who ultimately bear the greatest grief and guilt. I hope that as
this latest horrific act of violence settles, we as people, start to consider
how society itself, is perhaps the problem.

When I was a young child, most television shows were about
cowboys and animals. They evolved into weekly programs about “Leave it to
Beaver” type family life. As I grew older, there were many about doctors and
hospitals. Turn on the TV now and you will find shows about violence and crime
every night of the week. I call them “murder” shows. Admittedly, they captured
my interest for a time, as it was interesting to learn how crimes were solved
and to watch the investigators figure out the “criminal mind”. I no longer can
watch them. There have been too many stories in the news that read like a
script from one of those shows. The recent murder of a little girl in the
Denver area was one such story. A young person murdered her and I couldn’t help
but think that he might have learned his crime from watching “murder” shows on
television. But we, in fact, are becoming desensitized to violence as a
society. I cringe every time a six or seven year old in my class enthusiastically
describes a violent video game or movie, telling of shooting enemies and bad
guys.

When random acts of violence take place in our nation, we
seem to crave news about them. The television is taken over by live reports,
interviews with anyone who will speak, and the reflections of an unending
number of experts. The nonstop reporting and constant visual reminders compound
our grief. It is hard to escape that from a distance, and I can’t imagine how
that would feel if you were an actual victim or family member. We have a family
tie to Columbine and I can tell you personally that the media keeps that pain
alive for him constantly. There was footage from Columbine shown yesterday
during the Sandy Hook Elementary reporting! I think the worst moment came when
they began interviewing young children. I heard a reporter ask a child, “How
many shots did you hear?” I wanted to reach through the screen and grab the
reporter by the collar! We need to know… we need to understand… we need a way
to help those who are victims. We do not need to have our lives taken over by a
steady flow of details and sensationalized sadness.

Rather than spending time trying to place blame or becoming
depressed by the reports on television over the next days and weeks, we all
need to hug our children, bake cookies, read them stories, and preserve their
innocence. Teach them about goodness and kindness. Find a way to do something
kind for someone else. Turn off your television.

May God bless the grieving people in Newtown, Connecticut.
We are all so sorry….

4 comments:

You hit the nail on the head Cheryl...the focus is already off of the families. I lost my 4 year old niece in an accident, and I cannot imagine the horror of seeing it reported on television continuously. I saw an interview with a child asking her about the scene, re-living it on world news, no consideration is given to the fact that this child is in shock and she was taken advantage of by the media. Indeed, we need to bake, talk and be the example of what we want to see in this world.