But today's Science section of the New York Times makes us wonder if there isn't anything to that old adage from Miss Bitter With Baggage. The paper reports that dogs wag their tails to the left when feeling fearful and to the right when feeling happy and receptive. And because all we think about here at Jezebel is cock [And handbags! -Ed.], we wonder if a similar conclusion can be drawn about men, depending on which direction they "dress" themselves (meaning: on which side they like to pack their peens!). Are lefty dudes pessimists and righties optimists?

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