The first time, I broke up with my ex-boyfriend when I saw an email from his friend saying - to this day - the most offensive things anyone has ever said about me; my then boyfriend didn't see fit to address it and I didn't see fit to stay with someone who was so blasé about his friends saying reprehensible things.

The second time I got into a massive fight with my boyfriend when I found out about boobs in his face. He said he hadn't had boobs in his face, I saw he had. I was angry he lied and then tried to cover up the lie.

Dating in Hong Kong as an expat woman is rough. Most people you meet are here temporarily and thus have a "work hard, play hard" mentality that precludes actually getting to know someone on a deeper level. Further, the number of eligible women is far higher than that of eligible men.

I was messaging a guy with a marginal amount of potential on Tinder when I went to grab some food. I came back to my phone and a text that read, "are you pooing?" I told him I wasn't, to which he responded "lol...so...want to meet for a beer sometime?"