Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The wife of the England and Manchester United star is said to be three months' pregnant. But neither of the couple's spokesmen could be contacted to confirm the claim.

'Hello' and 'OK' magazines are both known to be bidding, with 'OK' believed to have offered in excess of £1 million not to be the ones photographing it.

Editor of 'Stars!!" magazine, Sleb Starfucker, said, "the bidding war is intense - huge sums are being thrown around to avoid having to shoot Wayne and his sprog. I mean, I know people say there's no such thing as an ugly baby, but come on - we could shave a Shitzhu's arse and nobody would be able to tell the difference".

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