The Middle Serves Up an Important Marriage Lesson We Can All Follow

Silence is golden.

As the opening lines of Anna Karenina go: "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." And on sitcoms, every unhappy family is only superficially unhappy until their dramatic tension of the week can be resolved in a humorous way... before they're back to being unhappy next week. That's why we love ABC's The Middle. The Heck family isn't supposed to be miserable—and the writers don't waste time trying to make you think that they are. Instead, the more unpleasant and bleak realities of everyday life temporarily knock them down, but at the end of each episode, they're back to supporting one another and realizing once again how grateful they are to be Hecks.

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That's right, this is a show about a happy family. But sorry, Tolstoy, they're not like all other happy families. Why? Frankie and Mike Heck are honest about their marriage in a way that may not seem like the makings of a content coupling, but it is. And it is so, so refreshing to see depicted on TV. Take last night's episode, for example.

In an effort to move more ("Dr. Oz says sitting is the new smoking," Frankie says—preach), she and Mike head outside to take a walk together. Unfortunately, while they're no longer dying from sitting, they're now dying from boredom because they have nothiing to say to one another. Luckily, they run into another couple and realize how witty and effervescant they can be when they talk to other people. So Frankie posits that if they can be that interesting for other people, they can be the same way when it's just the two of them.

Nope. They again find themselves walking in silence—and praying for the other couple to show—the next day. "Maybe we've just said everything we have to say to each other," Frankie says, and Mike agrees: "I am pretty bored of talking to you." Now, most couples would see this as a massive red flag. How can they still be content in their marriage if they so readily joke that maybe they should just sit on the couch, letting the cable company "bring it" instead of trying to bring it themselves?

In an effort to revive their sparkling social selves, Frankie and Mike throw a dinner party. During the meal, however, they end up only talking to each other, having the same old "What did you do today?" conversation they'd have if it were just the two of them. They retreat to the kitchen to get the after-dinner coffee ready and spy two of their guests arguing about the other's annoying social behaviors, which leads to an epiphany.

"Maybe behind closed doors, no one's really bringing it," Frankie realizes. And while that statement may sound sad, we love it. When you've been married as long as the Hecks, one of the things you appreciate is how content you can be when you're with the other person... not talking. It's not just "In sickness and in health, for richer or poorer;" it's also "whether the other person is bringing it or not." Behind closed doors, Frankie and Mike may not always have stand-up act-worthy conversations, but they're happy with one another, and that's what matters most. Maybe the golden rule of marriage is that silence can be golden... not a red flag.