As a consequence, there are many things that have been pissing me off. Think I’ll just start with one of them…

….If you’re on the internet at all, you have no doubt seen the myriad of posts on news sites and social networks describing the 10,000 ways you should be. They’re all over the place; life hacker, the Huffington post, take your pick – this is not an exhaustive list.

I’m sure that some people get some good information from these sites.

(I mean, Hell, there has to be someone out there whose life is changed by “10 ways to be happy now”, or “why you should ditch store-bought shampoo”, or “what you need to do to get rich without really trying”. It’s fucking always something.)

And it’s getting on my goddamn nerves.

Isn’t there enough bullshit in the print and news media, and on television, telling you how bad your life sucks already?

To give them the benefit of the doubt, I tend to assume that the people/ companies that print, air, and post these articles and abstracts do so, not just to make money, but out of a desire to genuinely impart information that helps people.

I give them that much credit.

But it’s become too saturated. I don’t mean to sound like some pretentious, hipster, cocksucker. That’s not my bag. I’m saying that there is just too much shit out there telling us that we are not good enough as we are.

I can think of few things so detrimental to the general American psyche than that.

(There are some, but I’ll save that for another rant).

Here’s the thing, you used to have to go to a family reunion, or a local bar, to hear a drunk friend or relative tell you everything you’re doing wrong with your life and how you should fix it. And really, those are special occasions that don’t bombard the senses every time one logs on. Plus, you can avoid those situations with only a modicum of social liability.

Now we see them all-the-fucking-time.

note: If you get something helpful or life-changing out of one of these avenues, good for you. I’m not bagging on you for finding meaning, even if it’s in terrible places. Many of us know that terrible places are often the soil from which wisdom grows.

But I’m getting sick of the fucking trend.

Ancient gurus had the right idea; when people sincerely want help, they will go looking for it. It doesn’t have to be shoved down their throats. More than that, unasked-for advice is dramatically less-followed than advice that is actually sought. If you have it together, people will see that, and they will come to you. Then and only then will they be ready to make some sort of change.

But here’s my real point: I’m tired of everyone and their yoga teacher/ cross-fit trainer thinking they can and should be telling other people how to be.

It just isn’t fucking necessary.

Worse than being unnecessary, it’s condescending and judgmental.

These people/ companies, (many of whom have zero fucking credentials), whether they know it or not, are – by offering unasked-for advice – telling us that we are somehow wrong, but we could be better if only we followed their way.

But it’s their way. It works for them. It is the height of arrogance to believe just because some method or technique worked for you that it will work, or is applicable to anyone else.

We are not all alike. Our personalities and experiences are different, sometimes vastly so. The combination of whatever that works for one will not necessarily work for another. Maybe we can find something in it that we can use, but it won’t be the exact formula. It never is. By the very nature of our individual existences, it can’t be.

We can only be who we are.

(I will add that the posts about striving for authenticity piss me off for the same reason; stop telling us how to be. No one has the expertise to do that.)

Very rarely have I seen a post or article telling me that whoever I am is perfectly fine. They’re out there, but hard to find, and this isn’t one of them.

(I’m just bitching here. I’m not offering advice.)

Here’s the fact, (and I don’t need credentials for this because you can discover it for yourself), each of us is unique. No exception. It is up to each of us, individually, to discover and decide how we should live, or what a good life is for ourselves.

I’m not going to suggest you embark on this journey. It’s not my business what you do with your life, and when you want to, you will, without prompting from me or anyone else.

I’m not even going to suggest that you stop judging people. As Americans that is our right.

Do as you will.

(with respect to Aleister Crowley).

Be who you are.

I hope you find a way to be happy with it.

After all, you’re the only you there is, and this is the only life you’ve got.