Hump With Caution, These Are The Most Dangerous Sex Positions For Dudes

8 months ago

Do you love having sex but constantly worry about your swollen member getting snapped in half like a twig mid-coitus? According to a study from Brazilian researchers conducted in 2014, here are a few hot and heavy sex positions that you might want to avoid.

Missionary Position

Missionary position seems old, reliable and safe but not so according to this study. Of the forty-four men surveyed who went to the hospital with a bent penis, over twenty-percent said it happened during missionary sex.

As with all cases, the injury occurs when the dude gets a little too “enthusiastic” during this position of intercourse. All it takes is accidentally hitting your partner’s pelvis bone or bending your body at a weird angle to put yourself in “fractured penis city” which is not the name of a real city, but it would be gross/awesome if it was.

Doggy Style

Of the men surveyed, nearly thirty-percent said they broke their pecker while participating in “doggy-style” brand sex. As with missionary sex injuries, doggy-style injuries tend to happen when the male is overly enthusiastic, thrusts at a weird angle or manages to strike their partner’s pelvic bone with their penile implement.Bow wow wow.

Cowgirl

The most dangerous sex position of them all is “cowgirl” otherwise known as “girl on top.”

Of the men surveyed, half of them had to receive emergency medical attention due to breaking their boner while in the girl on top position. Why is this position so dangerous? The person on top is responsible for control, speed and force and if that person is not the proud owner of a penis, they might, unkowningly force the penis owner into snappy situation.

The snap I’m referring to is of course the sound that your member makes when it snaps in half.

There you have it. Those are the top three most dangerous sex positions for dudes. Happy humping!