Sink your teeth into it with Ayun Halliday, sole employee of The East Village Inky. Dare to Be Heinie!

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Culinary Road Trip: Fairway in Red Hook

Hard to believe it's been a week since Mrs. Lindsay-Abaire and I took a road trip to the new Fairway in Red Hook. As much as I hate cars, I love parking in full view of the Statue of Liberty! I had lots of thoughts regarding Fairway's brocolli (wiggly), signage (excellent) and fig jam (who cares how much it costs?! lay that shit on me!), but before I could get around to interviewing myself, someone had the call to scoop me by getting in contact with Mrs. Lindsay-Abaire, who betrayed me by taking time out of her busy schedule, rehearsing what she's going to wear to the Tony Awards, to answer this media jackal's hard-hitting questions!

Hello, i'm a very important journalist researching a very important article for a tremendously influential publication.

What's the best thing you bought at Fairway?mmmm. . .My Thai young coconut perhaps? I was taken also with the Fairway Thai shrimp and scallop soup -- tho' I needed to add broth. The olive bar was a hit for me too, with those wee peppadew peppers. I have a hopeful feeling about those sorbets, too.

What do you regret not buying at Fairway?

That long-ass squash you were wielding in the produce aisle.

Can you tell us a little about the prices, Ma'am?

Honestly, hit and miss -- $2.50 organic milk is big draw and they had some stands devoted to super-low priced specials, But frankly how am I getting through 3 boxes of Raisin Bran for $5 with Mr. Smoothie and Mr. Egg-in-a-Nest under my roof?

I noticed you partook of some free samples, and even demanded a free sample of something that had not been set out for the general public's complimentary consumption. What items would you suggest making available to Fairway shoppers as free samples?

To contextualize my admittedly edgy demeanor at the cheese counter: My only visit to the UWS outpost of Fairway included a stop at their "Cheese Cave" where it was routine practice for the cheese monger to offer a sample of any cheese even inquired about. I was caught off-guard by our mongers reticence and worried my pal Ayun would be sold hefty-price-tag blue (which I bullied her into considering) without the first taste for free.

I would love it if they would set out some free samples of the many different hummus-esque spreads and dips that are available -- each sounds great, but boy have I been burned by laying out the green for school-paste that I am then stuck with because I don't want to waste it by throwing it out, but can't bring myself to eat or foist it on guests.

Is there room for improvement at Fairway?I'd love a place to buy a coffee at about the half-way point in my shopping journey. Also, I'd like to not have to double-back to get to the parts of the store I miss. They kind of present you with a road to Oz-esque fork situation.

Why come you took so long in the checkout line?First of all, my receipt is longer than my arm, so personal consumption played a role. Also there were some produce identification issues which will probably resolve over time.

Thank you. I look forward to including your uncredited research under my byline.