April's discussion for Mommy's Day Out Book Club.Rebecca Walker's memoir - of before her pregnancy and throughout.

"Can I survive having a baby? Will IApril's discussion for Mommy's Day Out Book Club.Rebecca Walker's memoir - of before her pregnancy and throughout.

"Can I survive having a baby? Will I lose myself - my body, my mind, my options - and be left trapped, resentful, and irretrievably overwhelmed? If I have a baby, we wonder silently to ourselves, will I die?" (6).

"To compound matters, I had a tempestuous relationship with my mother, and feared the inevitable kick back sure to follow such a final and dramatic departure from daughterhood" (6).

"It seemed that these mothers did not realize that they had to give adulthood to their daughters by stepping down, stepping back, stepping away, and letting the daughters take center stage" (6).

"What I did know is that even though I doubted my ability to mother, partner, work, evolve, and serve, all in one lifetime, some part of this flesh body I call me was being pulled toward birth: my baby's and my own" (9).

".. how everyone is bound to have a reaction that has nothing to do with me" (11).

Sonam will be her midwife (34). "She told me to remember that whatever is going on with my mother has nothing to do with me, and that babies have a way of transforming families" (35).

"I am determined to live in a way that puts my baby first. I would rather not have a child than subject another human being to eking out an identity in the wake of unbridled narcissism.. But are narcissists aware of their narcissism?" (37).

"I woke up this morning feeling the distance between my life now and all the people I still love but no longer know." (41).

"There was no one who said to me, the way we now say to kids who are mixed race or bi-religious or have two daddies, Isn't it wonderful that you have these two role models and they are both so different! No one said over and over again (because that's how many times it takes) or even once, When you grow up you can embrace motherhood wholeheartedly and still accomplish great things. It seems absurdly obvious now, but growing up, I swear, I could not fathom it" (46).

"Motherhood is brand-new every time; motherhood is full of possibility" (48).

".. unlike most developed nations, and even some not-so-developed nations, America has no social support system to speak of for new parents. Paid parental leave, which can be up to two years in countries like Sweden and Denmark and divided between two parents, is virtually nonexistent here, with American women getting only six weeks, if they're lucky" (64).

"Even from a purely capitalist point of view, you would think that well-looked after, well-educated children would ensure a competent workforce and stable populace" (64).

"I asked Glen to come because I was truly, honestly, afraid of being alone with her. The last encounter was that disturbing.. We went over and she was completly angelic, as if a month ago she didn't tell me I was piece of shit and threaten to ruin the reputation it has taken fifteen years to build" (87).

"Mothering has to do with setting appropriate boundaries and giving kids room to be themselves. Smothering has to do with projecting all of your fears and anxieties onto kids and not giving them a moment's peace" (92).

"She let go of everything she knew, family, friends, community, to give me an opportunity to live free of that burden, and looking back now, I'm sure it saved my life" (Glen's view of his mother) (92-3).

"At one point in the conversation, he said something that he often says when we discuss raising children and the state of masculinity: "Boys need their mothers" " (93).

"I can see the importance of making decisions that enable your child to be not just physically safe in an envionment, but emotionally and psychologically safe as well" (93).

Rebecca is having a boy (97).

"Going out alone was eerie. I felt exposed in a way I've never experienced. Being a New Yorker, I am used to walking around at night. I know how to scan for danger without thinking about it. But I've never felt like I should be at home, behind closed doors, because the streets are unsafe. I definetly have never felt that I needed to have a man by my side to protect me" (142).

peripatetic - walking or traveling about (144)

"It's not about marrying for love or money, it's about partnering for sanity, survivability, and the calculable probability that together the tow of you will create something more gorgeous and powerful than you ever could alone" (146).

The Dalai Lama "was talking about the myth of independence. If you are so independent, he asked, who grows your food? Who sews your clothes, builds your house, makes sure that water comes out of your showerhead?" (147).

"As a mother, I worry about how it makes boys and men feel to hear they are not needed, and can be made obsolete by the presence of enough money and a few good girlfriends" (147).

"There is power in partnership, otherwise the modern, government-sanctioned version of it, marriage, wouldn't be able to hold" (148).

"Of course you want to have a baby, he said, and you should. There are things you learn when you have a baby that you cannot learn any other way.. You find out what life is about when you carry another human being in your womb. You find out what really matters when you straddle life and death to push your child through the birth canal" (167).

"The transition from observer to participant has been inexplicably liberating" (202).

"All these years I haven't been able to stand up for myself, but now, for him, I'm willing to walk through fire. Which is about what becoming a mother feels like" (205).

"And even though loving another human being a thousand times more than you love yourself is arguably the most subersive thrill left in this object-obsessed, hypercapilast world, I miss having only myself to worry about. The constant fear for my baby's psychological and physical well-being is noble, but enervating in every way" (206)....more

**spoiler alert** Reading this for my Mommy's Day Out Book Club - April's discussion..

**Finished this book in time for my discussion. **I really am so**spoiler alert** Reading this for my Mommy's Day Out Book Club - April's discussion..

**Finished this book in time for my discussion. **I really am so grateful for Brooke Shields for writing this. Postpartum Depression is such a serious state and many people are not aware of it or choose not to even acknowledge that it actually exists. New mothers are expected to know how to be mothers - that it should be instinctual, that it should be ingrained and that there will be a kind of happily-ever-after-bond with mother and child. The sad thing is that our culture expects mothers to be perfect mothers and a lot of times because of this new mothers have expectations for themselves that are way too unrealstic.

The wonderful thing about this book is that Brooke Shields tries to get down to the real nitty-gritty once she is aware of Postpartum Depression and that she has it. She keeps asking questions about these feelings and does anyone else have these feelings to? Many people kind of looked at her and were shocked at her questions - but then she got some honest answers from some people.

I was overcome with emotion while reading this. I had similar feelings after my son was born, but I did not ever admit this to my husband or other family members. I can see now that I should have gotten help. Luckily I managed to get over my state and my son and I were both fine.

I believe everyone should be educated about Postpartum Depression. ...more

The great thing about Jenny McCarthy is that she doens't hold back - and if you don't like vivid details about what happens after you've had your babyThe great thing about Jenny McCarthy is that she doens't hold back - and if you don't like vivid details about what happens after you've had your baby then forget it - don't read.. but if you can handle the truth - then go forward! :)She's funny, truthful, and yes a bit crass.

I love reading other women's accounts of their breastfeeding stories.. it's so comforting and so funny to be abI LOVED this book! I want my own copy..

I love reading other women's accounts of their breastfeeding stories.. it's so comforting and so funny to be able to relate.. I always want to share my breastfeeding stories to people but seriously how can they relate unless they actually did it themselves?

And honestly this has inspired me to write some of my own experiences.....more

**spoiler alert** Heather Armstrong is a Goddess. She writes honestly about what it's like from the beginning of pregnancy and ends the book at the ti**spoiler alert** Heather Armstrong is a Goddess. She writes honestly about what it's like from the beginning of pregnancy and ends the book at the time when her daughter is 9 months old. She writes candidly about everything from needing to pee every so often during pregnancy to dealing with a baby who screamed because she wanted to be left alone and not held at all! Her writing is candid and at times you want to cringe and say ewww!! but you know that what you are reading is so true because you've dealt with that exact same thing! I laughed as I read this because I read it and related to her because something that she wrote had happened to me in some form or another.. whether it was the cravings during pregnancy or dealing with breastfeeding issues or wanting to have alone time with my husband..

My heart also felt sympathy for Heather as she felt like she was loosing her mind because I felt that way when my son was just born. Though I didn't admit myself to a mental hospital like she did, brave soul, I was a wimp and told myself over and over that I was fine. That nothing could be worst than this - I thought even though they were thoughts of insanity and anxiety - now that I look back. I was lucky that I didn't delve into that depression further than I did, but I didn't even know that I had any kind of depression. I know that I did, thinking back, and reading up on it. I'm so glad that I have my husband because without him, without his support I don't know how I got out of that state.

I think that more books like this should be written because it's so wonderful to be able to read something like this and relate.

**spoiler alert** I LOVE this book! It's so great because it has little snippets from mothers - all anonymous - about what they do to keep their sanit**spoiler alert** I LOVE this book! It's so great because it has little snippets from mothers - all anonymous - about what they do to keep their sanity..from dealing with children, to other annoying moms, to husbands, to just life in general.

Here's an example:

"My shrink tells me we have to laugh more. What a waste of money."

I would read these snippets and just bust out laughing ~ I want my own copy! ...more

Beautiful photographs of babies throughout the book. My son who is almost 9 months loves to look at the photographs of the babies.. I can see him growBeautiful photographs of babies throughout the book. My son who is almost 9 months loves to look at the photographs of the babies.. I can see him growing and developing everyday..

I just finished this book and I found it as a good source for new mom's. If only I had it months ago.. it would have helped during those early stagesI just finished this book and I found it as a good source for new mom's. If only I had it months ago.. it would have helped during those early stages of being a new mom - though I don't know if I would have had time to read it like I do now. I do think it's a must-read for all new moms. ...more

I couldn't get into this book - I mean yeah she's got humor and yeah she's got the whole attitude of I don't care what other moms think of me why shouI couldn't get into this book - I mean yeah she's got humor and yeah she's got the whole attitude of I don't care what other moms think of me why should I care attitude? but for some reason it was way too much for me. I might try to re-read it some day but right now I'm putting it back on the library bookshelf. ...more

This is a good book to have for those of you who are planning to breastfeed or are already breastfeeding. It has a lot of information with tons of humThis is a good book to have for those of you who are planning to breastfeed or are already breastfeeding. It has a lot of information with tons of humor and examples of what it's really like to breastfeed, what kind of situations you'll be dealing with and practical advice. ...more

Tracy Hogg introduces parents-to-be about the E.A.S.Y. program (eat, activity, sleep and yourself) and S.L.O.W. (Stop, listen, observe and what's up).Tracy Hogg introduces parents-to-be about the E.A.S.Y. program (eat, activity, sleep and yourself) and S.L.O.W. (Stop, listen, observe and what's up). She shows how to read your baby's body language and how to tell if the baby is having colic, is hungry or just wants to be held.

This is my first book on parenting so it's hard to tell if it's a good guidebook so I really can't compare - yet. Other than that, I like how Hogg tells parents-to-be that it's okay to take a breather from time to time and that it takes time to learn how to be a parent. ...more