The (Not-So) Incredibles

(For the first time, the dark undertones didn’t scare anyone, just drew them in deeper.)

And the talk at the end of the movie inevitably turned to super-powers.

Specifically, which ones we each wished to possess.

The Girl liked the character Violet’s ability to throw up a shield, to protect her family. From a little girl whose every waking hour of late is spent creating games where she is mother/babysitter/big sister to dolls, I’m not at all surprised. All the domesticity and nurturing that seems to have eluded me has landed firmly in the next generation.

I said I wanted super speed. Because maybe, maybe if I could outpace time itself, I could feel in control, get the grunt work out of the way and then enjoy the rest, I could feel like I was the boss of me. Maybe.

The Boy considered it for a while.

He couldn’t settle on just one. He wanted them ALL. He needed to be fastest, strongest, smartest.

I tried to read something into it, figure out what this said about him, what personality traits were being revealed by his choice.

oh, and he wants to have the longest fingernails, the longest beard, be the tallest/fattest/shortest person, eat the most hot dogs in 1 minute… that’s not superpowers. that’s a stinkin reality tv show…

Telepath, including animals. No question. OR flying. OR always being the boss. (“You’re not the boss of me!” “Yes I am.” “Oh, of course, you are, I’m sorry.” “Damn straight. Get your head out of your ass and do what I say.”)

My high school friends and I took our physical traits that we joke about most and made them into superpowers. My superhero name was “Clodhoopperus” because of my gigantic feet. I could use them to stamp out forest fires.

My hairy friend Chris (who was called “Teen Wolf” in the boys locker room in high school) was called “Wolverine” and his power was to take his massive amounts of body hair and to quicky create webs out of it to catch the bad guys.