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VOL. XXXVII.
J&iaimiim %ectai«T.
JOS. A. WADDELL, )
L. WADDELL, Jr., VProprietors.
RICHARD MAUZY. J
TERMS.
2_f- The ' 'SPECTA TOR is published once a week
%t Two Doliars and fifty Cents a year, which may be
discharged by the payment of Two Dollars at any time
within the year. No subscription will be discontinued
!wt at the option of the Editors, until all arrearages are
paid.
AD VERTISEMENTS often lines {or less,) inserted
three times for one dollar, and twenty-five cents for each
iubseqaentcontinuance. Largeradvertisementsinserted
in the same proportion.
A liberal discount made to those who advertise by the
year.
Professional Cards, not exceeding seven lines, will be
inserted for one year for $5 00—6 months for $8 00.
Onesquare, (tenlines) 1 year $8 00
" « 6 months 5 00
«« " 3 « 800
Two squares 1 year 12 00
" " 8 00
<« <« 8 " 500
Three squares 1 year *. 15 00
" " 6 months 10 00
" " 8 " 700
One th*rd column 1 year 18 00
« " " 6 months 1200
«« «« << 8 " 600
One column 1 year 50 00
«« " 6 months 80 00
All advertising for a less time than three months, will
as charged for at the usual rates —sl 00 per square for
the first three insertions, and twenty-five cents for each
subseav-ent issue.
- CARDS.
MARK WOOD & GRAVES,
FASHIONABLE TAILORS, -Ai
Opposite the Jftarble Yard, Sa
Main St., Stannton, Va. _■_-
WOULD inform their friends and the public gen
erally that they are now prepared to execute
wibrk entrusted to them in the neatest and most fash
ionable styles.
As they have had the practice of six years as CUT
TERS they feel confident of pleasing all who may
favour them with their custom, and they hope by
prompt attention to business to merit a liberal share
of patronage.
Sta.inton, Sep. 6, 1859.
JAB a MCVEIGH. EDGAR T. MCVBIGH.
jas. h. McVeigh & son.,
(Successors to McVeigh & Chamberlain,)
WHOLESALE CxROCERS,
AND DEALERS IN
Liquors, Wines, Tobacco, Segars, &C
PRINCE STREET WHARF,
Alexandria, Va.
March -29, 1559.—1y.
VV e_terD Virginia *
MARBLE WORKS, m {
AT STAUNTON jljjß II
HARRISCNBURQ. [Rtf _=3
HARUUIS & k£LLEV. ,<^_l
Staunton, April 7, 1858.
GEO. M. COCHRAN. JAMBS COCHRaX.
COCHRAN &. COCHRAN,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
STAUNTON, VA.,
WILL practice their profession in all the Courts of
Augusta and the Circuit Courts of Bath and
Highland. Strict attention will be given to all busi
ness entrusted to their care.
Aug. 24, 1858. ___
POWELL HARRISON,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
STAUNTON, VIRGINIA,
WILL practice in the Courts of Augusta and High
land.
He may be fouud at his office, adjoining the
Sheriff's office.
Dec. 9, 1857.
GA . SMITH Manufacturer of SWA
• Ladies' Shoes of all descnp- _r f_J
tions, keeps a large stock constantly on
hand and offers them at very reasonable prices. Also
MISSES' and CHILDREN'S SHOES. His stand is
next door to thb Post Office. Patronage is res
pectfully solicited.
SUuntop, May 17, 1859.
GUY 8b W ADDELL,
REAL ESTATE AGENTS,
STAUNTON, VIRGINIA.
BUYERS AND SELLERS will find it to their ad
vantage to call at their office in the Brick part
■>f the Old Bell, Tavern.
Staunton, Sep. 6. 1859.
J. M. HANGER
ATTORNEY AT LAW, STAUNTON, VA.,
WILL practice in all the Courts held in Staunton,
and in the Circuit Courts of Albemarle and
ckiugham. Office in the brick-row, in the rear of
he Court-house.
Staunton, Dec. 30, 1857.
W. MEREDITH,
DEALER IN
JEWELRY, CLOCKS, WATCHES, &c,
Main St., Staunton, Va.
__|F" Watches and Jewelry Repaired.
Staunton, Jan. 17.
JOHN C. MICHIE,
< ATTORNEY AT LAW,
WARM SPRINGS, BATH COUNTY, VA..
WILL practice in the Courts of Bath, Highland,
Pocahontas and Augusta. __F" All business
entrusted to him will be promptly attended to.
March 18, 1860. —6mc.
OCTOR JAMES 11. GILKESON-Having
located in Staunton, tenders his professionalser
vices to the public. He may be found, when not pro
essi-.>nally engaged, at the room over the Saddle and
Harness establishment of Mr. G. H. Elick, nearly op
posite the Post Office.
Staunton Feb. _ 1859—tf.
A. E>. CHANDLER,
UNDERTAKER,
Staunton, fa.,
KEEPS METALIC CASES of all sizes, at Staun
ton and Millborough Depot, at City Prices.
Staunton. July 19,1859.
R. L. DOYLE,
Attorney at Law, Staunton, Va..
WILL practice in the Courts of Augusta, Rock
bridge, Bath and Highland.
July 2*.». 1857.
r i\/_ NEGROES WANTED.—I wish to pnr
s OU'/ -'iiase Mt likely voting Negroes, of both sex
es, for the Southern market, for which I will pay tbe
highest market prices iv cash. My address is Staun
ton, or Miiidlebrook, Augusta Co., Va.
Jan. 24,1860* J. E. CARSON.
DA. KAYSER would call attention to a new
• lot of French Cassimeres, Long Shawls, Canton
Flannels, Furs, Velvet iiibands, and many other
things just to band.
St..unton, Nov. 15, 1859.
SPRING AND OTHER WRAPPINGS.-
Plam and Zebra Cloth, 81-tck Silk, French Lace,
Mohair, and other Dusters and Mantillas of the newest
style, just received by D. A. KAYSER.
Staunton, March 27. 1860—Yin. copy all.
EALING WATER.-DR. W. B. YOUNG,
Druggist, has a large lot of Healing Water for
sale, and is the regular Agent for it in Staunton.
Dec. 13.
JUST RECEIVED.—The best and cheapestlow
price TOBACCO that can be found. Wholesale
or retail by JNO. B. EVANS.
Staunton, July 26, 1859.
CORN MEAL—For sale in large or small quan
tities at the STAUNTON STEAM MILLS at
market prices. Apply to
May 31,59. S. A. RICHARDSON, Sup't.
HORSE SHOES.—SO kegs Horse Sh«s. 1000
lbs best quality Nail Rod just received and for
sale low by GEO. E. PRICE.
Staunton, March 6.
TIN CHAMBER SETS—A few very handsome
sets just recei.ed by
T " WOODS _ GILKESON.
_Staunton, April 10, 1860. g
CLOAKING CLOTHS—A few pieces ofßlack
Corded Cloaking Cloth, just received at
Staunton, Nov. 22, 1359- D- A. KAYSER'S.
ORCHARD GRASS SEED for sale by
OWEN C MORRIS.
Staunton, April 10,1860.
VIRGINIA CASSIMERES.—A full supply
just v hand. TAYLOR A HOGE.
Staunton, April 10, 1860.
ATTENTION OFFICERS.-Military Cloth,
Swords, Sashes and Epaulets, at low prices, by
CRAWFORD A COCHRAN.
> Staunton, April 12 1852.
A BOOK FOR FARMERS Campbell s
Manual of Agriculture. ROB'T COWAN.
Staunton, Nov. 15.
SOFAS— A new lot Sofas, just to hand, very cheap
Staunton, July 19, 's*. A. D. CHAHDLER.
itemttit
MISCELLAXI-Ol'S.
FOR GOVERNOR.
GABRIEL HIRSH!
FOR LIEUT. GOV.
WILLIAM JONAS!
the failure of the Atlantic
JJM Cable to come up to the expectations of some of
the knowing ones of the Old and New World, yet
GABRIEL HIRSH, one of the largest stockholders
in the concern, for the purpose of cultivating a frater
nal feeling with all mankind, has extended it as far
as the city of Staunton, where it is performing some
of the greatest achievements of the age, in the wavol
exhibiting at his old stand, on Main Street, the
largest and most complete STOCK OF GOODS ever
brought to this market. The greatest wonder, how
ever, even surpassing the operations of the Cable, are
the "CHINESE JUGGLERS," on exhibition at his
window, where the prettiest man in the country is al
ways to be found engaged in Repairing Watches
and Jewelry.
s_F° The $4,000 offered some time since, is still in
the hands of a responsible gentleman in Staun ton,ready
to be handed over to any one who will bring forward
a superior workman in his line. G. HIRSH.
Stsuunton. Oct. 19,1858—tf
CONFECTIONERY ESTABLISHMENT 11!
CHOICE VARIETIES
FOR THE SEASON AT THE STAND
FORMERLY OCCUPIED BT
WM. T. MOUNT, Main St., Stannton, Va
MAGNUS S. CEASE
WOULD respectfully call the attention of the cit
izens of Staunton and vicinity to his large and
en irely new stock of FALL GOODS, which he is now
receiving and opening, cousisting of Water, Sugar and
Soda Crackers, Picnics, Raisins, Figs, Currants, Cit
ron, Dates, Prunes, English Walnuts, Filberts, Al
monds, Ground Nuts, Pecan Nuts, Lemons, Oranges,
Sardines,aifd Candies of every description.—
Also Fancy Goons, French Candies, Cakes ano
Toys.
ISF" Wedding parties furnished at the shortest no
tice, and on the most reasonable terms.
Also Fresh Peaches, Lobsters, Pickles, Catchups,
&c, Ac.
He will sell on reasonable terms, and respectfully
solicits a share of patronage.
£_f~ Candy sold at Wholesale and Retail.
Staunton, Nov. a, 1859.
GKEAT EXCITEMENT AT THE
CLOTHING HOUSE OF
JACOB POLLITZ,
(brakoebuhg's old stand.)
THOUGH the Great Eastern has met with serious
accident, vet my large and well selected stock of
FALL AND WINTER CLOTHING will abundantly
show that my cargo of Goods did arrive sately, and
includes the greatest variety of well finished clo
thing ever brought to this market.
Mv present stand, at liratideburg's old Corner
and Opposite the Va. Hotel, gives a sufficiency
of room to show to my customers as nice a stock
of Clothing as can be exhibited this side ot Baltimore
and which I will sell at Baltimore City Prices.
The public are invited to examine my stock, before
purchasing elsewhere, at least all those who consid
er that "a penny saved is a penny made."
JACOB POLLITZ,
Brandeburg's old stand, Opp'te Va. Hotel.
Staunton, Oct. 11. 1859.
rr\ANNERY. —1 have this day associated my son,
JL Wm. B. Gallaher with me in the Tanning busi
ness in the town of Waynesboro' and the business will
! hereafter be conducted in the name of H. L. GALLA
HER _ SON.
Persons indebted to my Tannery are hereby notified
to come forward and settle, aud those having claims
against it are requested to present the same for pay
ment. My sou, Wm. B. Gallaher, will always be found
at the Tannery and is authorized to settle for me.
Public patronage is solicited for the new concern.
fr_gr° The highest Cash price will be paid for hides,
skins and bark at all times. H. L. GALLAHER.
Waynesboro', Oct. 4, 1859.—1y*.
MtOBS All* _-J_-Mr€l__l9».
P. H. TROUT & CO.,
ARE now receiving a large stock of
Medicines, Paints, Oils, <_c,
tbe\ bought direct from the manufacturers andJ_J
importers, and are able to sell pure articles on
t_voi_bl« terms. Tneir stock ot SUKUICAL IN
STRUMENTS is very large, embracing all instru
ments needed for town or county practice. Also tbe
largest supply of Fancy Articles, Brushes, Fine
Perfumery, 4c, ever brought to this market.
Staunton, March t>, 1860.
APER .HANGINGS.—I have ju*t received
from one of the largest manufactories of Paper
Hangings in the United States, a great variety of
samples of the latest styles of Wall Paper. Per
sons wishing to procure handsome papering at rea
sonable prices are invited to call and examine my
samples, and I can order any they may select direct
from the Manufactories; getting it here in a few days
by express; selling in this way by the sample. la
void the necessity of keeping a large stock on hand;
and, consequently, will be able to sell for small pro
fits —more particularly, to cash customers.
Staunton, Feb. 28. R. COWAN.
DE FORREST, ARMSTONG, <& CO.
DRY GOODS MERCHANTS,
80 & 82 Chambers St., N. V.,
Would notify the Trade that they are opening
weekly, in new and beautiful patterns, the
Wamsutta Prints, also the Amoskeag, a New Print,
which excels every Print in the Country for perfec
tion of execution and design in full Madder Colors.
Our Prints are cheaper than any in market, and meet
ing with extensive sale. Orders promptly attended
to.
Jan. 31, 18f0—ly
DR. JAMES JOHNSTON, SURGICAL &
MECHANICAL DENTIST, having been located
permanently in Staunton for the last four years, would
respectfully inform his friends and the public gene
rally, that he still continues to practice Dentistry .in all
its various branches, with the strictest regard to du
rability and usefulness.
Office on the south-side of Main Street opposite the
old Spectator Office.
Staunton, Nov. 29, 1854.
UrpHE BELLE OF THE SOUTH!"—Six
1 doz. Skeleton Skirts, of all makes, as follows :
"Thomson's," "Sherwood's," "Moran's," and the
"Belle of the South," wnich is considered the most
graceful skirt now in use.
The above Skirts have just been received and will
be sold as low as possible.
PIPER _ FUNKHOUSER.
Staunton, Mar. 6, 1860. —Yin copy
WHEAT WANTED.—The Staunton Steam
Mills Co. will pay the highest prices in Cash
for Wheat. Farmers wishing to dispose of their
crops will probably consult their interests by bring
ing samples to S. A. RICHARDSON, Sup't.
Nov. 15. 1859.
PLASTER.— We have on hand a large quantity
ready-ground Blue Windsoi Plaster which we
will sell lor $11.50 per Ton ot 2000 \b&,for cash on de
livery, or will exchange for Wheat or Corn deliverell
at the Staunton Steam Mills, at fair market prices.
Feb. 7. S. A. RICHARDSON. Sup't.
TVJEW YORK LEDGER.-T HRILLING
il Tales in the New York Ledger. Hereafter I will
not sell the Ledger or Harper's Weekly on credit.—
No money—no papers. Don't ask for credit on pa
pers ROBT. COWAN.
Staunton, Jan. 3, 1860.
UST RECEIVED.—A very nne-gg^JCTjfa
lot of all kinds of Spectacles— *—_*w
ted, steel and gold—and all kinds of Spectacle Glas
ses, concave, convex and colored.
Staunton, Jan. 31—tf A. LANG.
MILL IRONS, MACHINERY AND ALL
kinds of Castings made to order at the Staunton
Foundry, by A. J. GARBER k CO.
Sep. 13, 1859.
OOTS &. SHOES.—Tbe largest variety ot Boots
and Shots on hand, to be sold at a small advance
on cost, at J. POLLITZ'S
Staunton, Oct. 11,1*59. Clothing House.
SOMETHING EXTRA. -Just received a fine
article of Lynchburg SMOKING TOBACCO, for
sale at the Tobacco House of J. B. EVANS.
Staunton, January 17.
OOFLAND'S GERMAN BITTERS, and
all kinds of Patent Medicines, for sale by
DR. H. S. EICHELBERGER.
Staunton, April 3, 1860.
PODELDOC SOAP!—For making Rora
back's Compound Chemical and Toilet Soaps,
for sale by DR. H S. EICHELBERGER.
Staunton, April 3, iB6O.
HATS.— BLACK MOLE-SKIN AND C A SSI
MERE HATS of the latest style and very supe
rior quality at DAVIS A KAYSER'S.
Staunton, April 3,1860.
fcfc I > ELLE OF THE SOUTH" and other new
_J> style HOOPS of the best make just received
by DAVIS A. KAYSER.
'Staunton, April 3, 1860.
ALL kinds of Iron Machinery fitted up at the work
Shop of the Staunton Foundry.
Sep 13, 1559. A. J. GaRBER & CO.
IT'OK Hats, Caps, and every style of Gents' Furnish
-1 ing Goods, call at J. POLLITZ'S
Staunton. Oct. 11,1859. Clothing Ho'ssn
O _L\>lL—A splendid article, at
DR. W. B. YOUNG'S.
Staunton, Nov. 1.
AD IKONS.—A lot of very superior polished
sad Irons just received and for sale.
Staunton. March 6. GEo. E. PRICE.
CIARPETS.- A few pieces of Super. Ingrain
/and Brussels Carpets for sale by
Staunton, April 8, 1860. D. A. KAYSER.
STAUNTON, VIRGINIA, TUESDAY, MAY 1, 1860.
POETRY.
Three Years after Marriage.
When jaded by the toils of life—
The anxious care and petty strife
That every day surround me;
How sweet to leave such ills behind,
And seek repose to wearied mind,
By straying through those woods so wild,
And feeling once more like a child
With dog and gun beside me.
Though many days have passed away
And time and care have made me grey—
Still youthful sports delight me;
And all the scenes of other days, c
My 'possum hunts and school-boy plays,
Come often fresh to me again,
Reviving me as Summer rain
Revives the plants around me.
And now and then some soothing chime
Rolls back for me the wheel of time,
And there she stands before me!
The sweetest girl I ever knew—
With heart as pure as morning dew,
With all the charms of "sweet sixteen,"
More lovely than an eastern queen,
The very girl that bound me.
Ah ! bound me heart and hand for life,
Because she is so good a wife
And boon companion for me,
Her worth now makes me prize her more
Than ever beauty did before,
And all tbe wrinkles on her brow
But make me love her better now
As years come stealing o'er me.
MISCELLANY.
The Care of Children with Reference to
Preventing the Fatality of Scarlet Fever.
That the scarlet fever is one of the most fatal
diseases to children which prevails in our land,
the anguish of too many parents' hearts can tea
tify. Anything, then, which can guard the lit
tle ones from its fatal effects will be gladly em
braced and cheerfully resorted to.
The most fatal point of attack of this disease
is, first, the throat, and second, the air passages
and lungs. When general disease of any kind
is received into the system, it locates upon the
weakest parts. Scarlet fever being an inflam
matory disease of tbe skin, and the lining mem
brane of the throat, air passages and lungs being
a continuation of that part of the skin, it neces
sarily attacks these. If any part ot this mem
brane is too weak to withstand the attack, and
throw it off by what physicians oall desquami
tion, the membrane ulcerates in patches and the
child dies. The membrane lining the throat is
almost always the first point of attack, from the
fact that this is usually weakest in children, and
less able to withstand the disease. Anything
then, which is calculated to strengthen and
toughen this membrane, or the membrane lining
tbe air passages and lungs, is calculated to ena
ble the child to withstand the attack of scarlet
fever.
To dQ this we commence when the child is
first born. The drink—the very first drink it
receives into its mouth, unless it is its mother's
milk, should be cold water. Its food should be
entirely drawn from its mother's breast, if pos
sible ; if not, it should be composed of healthy,
frefrh cow's milk, one third water, sweetened
with pnra white engar. The child ahould also
be suffered to drink all the water it will take.—
The sprue, red gum and children's sore mouth
causes debility of tbe membranes of the throat,
air passages, and renders them more liable to die
from scarlet fever. Cold water freely and fre
quently given is one of the best preventatives of
and remedies for those infantile diseases.
The next best means of strengthening and
toughening those membranes is by frequent
washings of the neck, throat and breast with
cold water, occasionally u-ang soap, and wiping
and rubbing the parts dry. This should be done
morning and evening—and if two or three times
more a day the better. These washings should
never be done with warm water after the child
is a few days old. It should always be cold wa
ter, aud the more friction used in drying the
skin after the washing ttie better.
The third best means of accomplishing this ob
ject is by the dress. The chest should be light
ly clothed with flannel, and the neck, top of tbe
chest and bead be entirely exposed to the air in
warm weather, and when in the bouse in win
ter. The arms and legs should never go uncov
ered. This causes the blood to recede from them,
gather in too large quantities around the throat
and chest, producing unnatural enlargement of
the glands, and other tissues there, and causing
a corresponding debility and liability to disease.
Tbe next best means of strengthening these
membranes in children is free exposure to the
air, and by inducing them to exercise their lungs
and throat by giggling, laughing, crowing, cry
ing and every other means possible. Laughing
and crying are very beneficial to children. A
child that spends one day without one or the
other cannot be healthy. At any rate, their in
dulgence in these practices strengthens and
toughens the organs most necessary to be
strengthened, to guard them against the fatal in
fluence of scarlet fever.
The way to give children exercise and air,
whether they are five days or five years old, is
to take them into tbe open air—not to let the
air blow on them, but take them into it and have
the pure air of heaven all around them. When
thus exercised or exposed, their feet, legs and
arms should be warmly clad, but their head, tace,
neck and shoulders exposed freely to the air.—
You cannot, or should not, prevent the cold air
from being breathed into their lunge. This is
absolutely necessary to strengthen them. If you,
at the same time, let tbe air of the same temper
ature have free accesss to the skin of the cbest,
neck and throat, you prevent their taking cold.
The simple means which we have now enu
merated can be applied and used by every moth
er and nurse. If they are used and applied as
directed above by all the mothers and nurses
in oar land, they will prevent tbe scarlet fever
from becoming fatal in thousands of cases where
it otherwise would. These means are as appli
cable to one part of the country as to another,
and to rural districts as well as to cfties. Th_|
fatal disease prevails in all these loca ities, with
out reference to class or circumstances of lite,
and these preventive means should be resorted
to by all.
Needle-work is thus gracefully eulogized by
Nathaniel Hawthrone, in "The Marble Faun :"
"There is something extremely pleasant, and
even touching—at least, of very sweet, soft, and
winning effect —in this peculiarity of needle
work, distinguishing men from women. Our
own sex is incapable of any such by-play aside
from the main business of life; but women—be
they of what earthly rank they may, however
gifted with intellect or genius, or endowed with
awful beauty—have always some little handi
work ready to fill up the tiny gap of every va
cant moment. A needle is familiar to the fin
gers ot them all. A queen, no doubt, plies it
on occasions; the woman-poet can use it as
adroitly as her pen ; the woman's eye that has
discovered a new star, turns from its glory to
send tbe polished little instrument gleamiug
along the hem of her kerchief, or to darn a cas
ual tray in her dress. And tbey have the ad
vantage of us in this respect. The slender thread
of silk or cotton keeps them united with the
small, tamiliar, gentle interests ot life, the con
tinually, operating influences of which do so
much tor the health of the character, and carry
off what would otherwise be a daugerous accu
mulation ot morbid sensibility. A vast deal of
human sympathy runs along this electric line,
stretching trom the throne to the wicker chair
ot the humblest seamstress, aud keeping high
and low in a spec.es of communion with their
kindred beings. Methinks it is a token of healthy
and gentle characteristics, when women of ao
oomplishmeuts and high thoughts love to sew,
especially as they are never more at home with
their own hearts than when so occupied.
leving's Eakly Attachment.—Mr. Bryant,
in bis eulogy upon Washington Irving, relates
the following incident in his life, and which had
so marked an influence upon bis character:
"It was during this interval (1809 to 1819)
that an event took place which had a marked
influence on Irving's future life, affected the
character of hi* writings, and now that the
death of both parties allows it to be spoken of
without reserve, gives a peculiar interest to his
personal history. He became attached to a
youDg lady whom he was to bave married.—
She died unwedded in the flower of her age;
there was a sorrowful leave-taking between her
and her lover, as the grave was about to sepa
rate them on the eve of what should have been
her bridal; and Irving ever after, to the close
of his life, tenderly cherished her memory. In
one of the biographical notices published imme
diately after Irving's death, an old, well-worn
copy of the Bible is spoken of, which was kept
lying ou the table in his chamber, within reach
of his bedside, bearing her name on the title
page in a delicate female hand—a relic which
we may presume to have been his constant com
panion. Those who are &fl_d of searching in
the biographies of eminent men for the circum
stances which determined the bent of their genius,
find in this sad event, and the oloud it threw
over the hopeful and cheerful period of early
manhood, an explanation of the transition from
the unbounded playfulness of the History of
New York to the serious, tender and meditative
vein of the Sketch Book."
_______________________
"I Don't oabe if I do."—ln olden time, be
fore the Maine laws were invented, Wing kept
the Hotel at Middle Granvalle, and from his well
stocked bar furnished "accommodations to man
and beast." Be was a good landlord, but ter
ribly deaf. Fish, the village painter, was af
flicted in the same way.
One day they were sitting by themselves in
the bar room. Wing was behind the counter
waiting for the next customer; while Fish was
lounging before the fire with a thirsty look, cast
ing sheep's eyes occasionally at Wing's decant
ere, and wishing devoutly that somebody would
come in and treat.
A traveller from the South, on his way to
Brandon, stepped in to 'inquire the distance.—
Going up to the counter he said :—
"Can you tell me, sir, how far it is to Bran
don ?"
"Brandy ?" says the ready landlord, jumping
up, "yes, sir, I think I have some," at the same
time handiug down a decanter of the precious
liquid.
"You misunderstand me," says the stranger,
"I asked how far it was to Brandon?"
"They call it pretty good brandy," says Wing.
"Will you take sugar with it ?" reaching as
he spoke for tbe bowl and toddystiok.
Tbe despairing traveller turned to Fish.
"Thelandlord," said he, "seems to be deaf;
will you tell me how far it is to Brandon ?"
"Thank you," said Fish, "I don't care if I do
take a drink with you!"
The stranger treated and led.
Stabvino a Obiminal.—Tbe Gazette di Bres
cia relates the following ridiculous anecdote, one
of the mauy which illustrate the spirit of the
Venetians and of their rulers :
"An amusing spectacle occurred in Venice.—
Among the pigeons which generally congregate
in the Piazza St. Marco, one came with a large
tricolor oockade tied round its neck. Immedi
ately thegrare occurrence was reported to tbe
police, and submitted to the judgment of Gov
ernor Bissengen, who pronounced capital sen
tence on the pigeon, s,nd, as an extraordinary
measure, a reward _i„ of 10f., and afterwards,
tor expedition's sake, ot 20f., was offered for the
arrest of the delinquent. It was now two o'clock,
the hour when tbe pigeons are ted from a win
dow in the piazza, aud the culprit was not yet
caught. Then several soldiers were ordered to
help tbe mau who feeds the pigeons, in this un
dertaking; accordingly all descriptions of sol
diers might be seen busied in displaying on tbe
window tbe most tempting morsels that could
draw thither that audaoious troubler of the pub
lic peace. But be, with wicked obstinacy, let
the sbirri take all this trouble, remaining
perched on a neighboring building. They were
obliged to make a regulai siege and take him by
hunger, when he was pitilessly executed."
Standard Household Wokds.—Pshaw 1—
Stop your noise! I'll box your earsl Hold
your tongue! Shut up this minute! Let me
be! Go away ! Get out! Behave yourselt! —
I won't! You shall! Never mind! You'll
catch it! Don't bother! Come here directly 1
Put away those things! You'll kill yourself!—
I don't care! They're mine I Mind your own
business! I'll tell my ma! You mean thing!
There, I told you so! You didn't! You did !
I will have it! 0, see what you've done!—
Twas you! Won't you g«t it though! It's
my house! Whose afraid of you ! Mah-h-h !
800-hoo! Boo! oo! oo I oo! What's the
matter? Clear out of this room directly! Do
you hear me? Right away! Dear mcl It's
enough to set one crazy ! 1 never did see in all
my born days! Would you put a tuck in it!—
Well, says I! says he! says she! says they!—
Bless me! No! Hem it all the way round!—
Three flounces! Gored! Pompadour! Work
ed crosswise. Lord & Taylor's! Trimmed with
velvet! Ten yards! Cut bias! Real sweet!
And one or two more.
There is a story told of a good minister at
Montague—Rev. Mr. Moody—who has been
most liberally furnished by nature with that
very necessary appendage to a man's face—his
nose. It it said that while at a public dinner
on a certain time, a gentleman who sat opposite
to M., thinking to get off a good joke at his ex
pense, remarked in a load tone:
"Mr. Moody, there is a fly on the end of your
nose."
This threw the company into a roar, for the
tone of the voice conveyed the impression that
the end of the uose was so far from Mr. Moody
that he would not know a fly was on it unless
some kind friend told him. But Mr. Moody
completely turned tbe tables, by remarking in
his cool, dry way:
"Well, Mr. , you are nearer the fly than
I am; wont you please brush it off?"
Tbe laugh that went round the table at this
sally of wit was perfectly uproarious.
Life's Happiest Peeiod. —Kingsley gives his
evidence on this disputed point. He thus de
clares : —There is no pleasure that I bave ever
experienced like a child's midsummer holyday.
The time, I meaD, when two or three of ns used
to go away up the brook, and take our dinners
with us, and come home at night tired, dirty,
happy, ecratched beyond recognition, with a
great nose gay, three little trout and one shoe, the
other having been used for a boat till it had gone
down, with all hand ', out of soundings. How
poor our Derby days, our Greenwich dinners,
our evening parties, where there are plenty of
nice girls; and after that ? Depend upon it, a
man never experiences such pleasure or grief af
ter fourteen as he does before, unless, in some
cases, in his first love making, when the sensa
tion is new to him.
How Babies are put to Sleep in India.—
Springs of water are abundant, and near one of
those, where it flows in a silvery stream, on a
ledge or field beneath it, tbe children, from even
a month old to three or four years of age, are
brought and laid down. By means of a small
piece of slit bamboo, a slight flow ot water is
obtained from the stream, and the bamboo slit
is so adjusted that the water falling from above,
alights on the well-shaven crown of the child,
and the unceasing Aow of water on its head
keeps up a perpetual lullaby ; and so for hours
and hours the most refractory intant is quieted
and left without apprehension by the mother,
who, when her work is done, returns to the spot
and hoists up her child on her hip, and sallies
home. ________——-
A boy and girl of tender years were disputing
as to what their mothers could do. Getting
impatient, tbe little damsel blurted out by a way
of climax and clincher :
"Well here's one thing that my mother can
do that yours can't—ray mother can take every
one of her teeth out at once 1"
For the Spectator.
Judge Thompson and the Receiver.
Messrs. Editors :—The decent ' _" has brought
forth again, and oh! theabo'tion! He comes
forth again, in all the "glaring impotence" of
bis bullying propensities. He says I now con
fess and justify. 1 deny this. What I have
written at first I shall hold up to at last. I have
been "driven to the wall" in no case. I have
given my arguments and he has giveu his; aud
I shall leave tbe people to decide. lam willing
that tbe sensible voters shall be judges of what
I have written. Ido not place such a high opin
ion upon my articles as be does upon bis own;
and I feel confident that tbe honest readers of
each do not read and construe as '_" does—do
not select one part of a sentence to subserve their
purpose and pass over tbe remainder—are not so
mean and so sinister as to shape and join tbe
assertions of an opponent so as to make him
mean what be does not.
He is tbe man who confesses and justifies. He
says that what I asserted was untrue, and at tbe
same time confesses that Mr. Kinney gave bis
bonds, in the very manner named in my article ;
but pretends to justify by making those bonds
what they never can be. He confesses that Mr.
Kinney was for 21 years Reoeiver of tbe Court
without any bond as Receiver; but holds that
bis bond as Clerk was also good for bis liabilities
as Receiver. What man, without prejudice and
sinister designs, believes this? Who believes
that a bond for one office is good for another {
Who believes that a bond given for one debt,
will make the securities upon that bond liable
for any other debt by tbe same man ? or upon
one contract liable for another contract? Sup
pose for a moment, that a certain person would
give bond for the_faithful discharge of bis duties
as Sheriff, and was at the same time made Con
stable, without bond, would any honest _urn
pretend that bis securities as Sheriff were liable
lor his acts as Constable ? Suppose again, an
individual gave his bond as Constable and, as it
frequently happens, be should be employed as
agent for tbe private collection of monies, aside
from bis office as Constable, would any one
presume bis securities liable for this money?—
What then is the difference between these cases
and tbe one under discussion ? Mr. Kinney was
appointed Clerk and gave bond as such. He
wa-> al-*o appointed Receiver, but gave no bond
as Receiver. These are separate offices, requir
ing ot course separate securities. As Clerk, he
attended to tbe business of Clerk; and as Receiver
tie received the monies of the Court. Who then
would palm upon bis securities this double lia
bility? Who would say that they are responsi
ble lor acts, for the performance of which they
never voucbed ? No one but this sell constitu
ted judge "Z" and bis coordinate dictators. —
The securities of Mr. Kinney undoubtedly be
came such only for his acts as Clerk, and to
make them liable for his acts as another officer,
would not ouly be inconsistent with justice, but
iv violation of law. Aud furthermore, if Mr.
Kinney gave bond in penalty of ouly $10,000 as
Clerk (aud Receiver, as "Z" would have it,) iv
1831, why was be required to give boud in a
double penalty, upon tbe passage ot tbe Act of
1852? Merely because, by that Act, the Judge
was compelled to demand a separate boud tor
the separate uffice ot Receiver, which office bad
all along beeu unsecured, from the negligence
and faithlessness of him, who should bave se
cured it by demanding a bond from bim who
tilled it. And again, w.-.y did tbe '■'■necessity' I
arise in 1852 "for a general Receiver?" Be
cause it became evident to those who originated
it, that, in no other way, could the Court be
made to require security for thi* responsible of
_ce. Security had beeu negLoied to be re
quired and the ouly remedy of the Legislature
was this coercive remedy. It is said, that this
Act, though applyiug geuerally over the State,
was at tbe time intended to have a special ap
plication to this locality ; and that it was drawn
up in Staunton, by one of our own delegates, and
reviewed aud revised by his friends. And it is
even said, that there is not another instanoe up
on record, in which the Receiver was not re
quired to give boud by bis Court. What does
all this meaß ? Something.
We now come to the Act itself. The glorious
* _" acknowledges that there was only one bond
taken, and that in 1852 ; but says that bond is
good eternally. Of course if it is valid—it must
be valid under tbe Act, for it was given under
it. But tbe 7th section of that Act reads thus:
"He (the Receiver) shall annually give before
the Court a bond, to be approved of by it, in
such penalty as tbe Court may direct, sufficient
at least to cover the probable amount that may
come into bis bands in any one year.' I Can any
honest man fail in construing this? Was ever
anything so plain ? It shall be given "annual
ly," saitb the law, as plainly as it can be said
aud as "mandatory," without consulting the
"public interest," for tbe public interest always
demands it. The Court does not know when
money may be paid into it, and should be ready
for the emergency and not wait until there were
liabilities before securities were required, which
would make the trouble endless. Judge "Z" as
serts that "John B. Baldwin and others have
brought suits upon this bond" and are confident
of recovering. I suppose tbe defendants and
their counsel are likewise confident that they
will not recover, or why will they stand them a
trial. Tbey bave tbe Act at least to back them.
This is all I shall say upon this subject, and am
willing that any competent, impartial and re
sponsible Judge shall, upon oath, deliver bis
opinion upon it. lam willing that any sound
lawyer, (Judge "Z" not excepted,) divested of
his impartialities and prejudices, and purged of
any dishonest motives, shall give the people,
upon oath, his construction of this Act.
What then might have been lost to the County,
by this negligence of a "faithful public servant,"
if tbe Receiver had failed to meet all of tbe de
mands instead of some only ? If $20,000 was
considered ouly "sufficient to cover the proba
ble amount in any one year," in the four years,
be was without a bond, it came to the round
sum ot $80,000. How do the people like to bave
so much of their money pass through any man's
hands, no matter bow honest and responsible,
without some guarantee ?
The very truthful "Z" says I am "slander
ous." As to Judge T., my answer is, truth is
no slander. As to Mr. Kinney I can have no
modve in attacking his memory. It was the
province of the Court to demand a bond and not
in Mr. Kinney's place to give it without request.
Be could become insolvent and irresponsible
without any dishonorable designs, for the un
certainty of human affairs applied to bim as well
as to any one else. It was Judge Thompson's
place to prepare for this uncertainty, and upon
him should fall the blame. The damning "Z"
asks too, "what I get tor writing?" I dont ex
pect to get anything except tbe hatred of a few
snobbish sycophants.
The rule you bave adopted, Messrs. Editors,
and other circumstances, r- quire that I should
send in my articles on Monday or Tuesday a
week before band. Consequently lam unable
to answer an article for two weeks, which your
readers will therefore excuse, as also the length
ot this article. I could not make it shorter and
do justice to "Z" and A Countbyman.
The following is an authentic anecdote of an
alderman in a provincial town in England, who,
being about to depart this life, as soon as he
knew that his case was desperate, called togeth
er all persons to whom he was indebted in bis
mercantile concerns, and said :
"Gentlemen, I am going to die, and my death
will be an inconvenience to you, because it will
be some time before you can get your accounts
settled by ray executors. Now, if you will al
low me a handsome discount, I will settle them
myself, at oncel"
They came into the proposal, and tbe old al
derman turned his death into nine hundred
pounds profit.
Onffy said he'd rather die in a railroad smash
up than a steamboat burst np, for this reason :—
"If you gits off and smashed up, dar you is;
but if you gits blowed up on the boat, whar is
you?"
"Am I not a real rain beau, my dear ?" said a
fop, rushing up with an umbrella to a lady in a
shower.
For the Spectator.
Messrs. Editors: —The inclosed communica
tion from my friend Cooney affords melancholy
proof that persons are actively interfering in
this judicial election, whose position should
make them more retiring. But I rej dee to hear
from all quarters of the Circuit that the people
have judged this thing wisely, and that the Grips
family will, without a peradveuture, have to
wear tbe string around their legs for at least
eight years longer—Judge L. P. Thompson pre
siding. Z.
Mister Izzard: —I was friendly to Torason,
but I now tell you I have changed my mind and
will go for Fults, and you must not think that
my nabor, Major Grips, is tbe occasion of my
turning round, for it's all of my own free will
and accord, and I tole the Major I would tell
you so, and I now say it. The Major is a fine
man, and a self-made man. He started in the
world swappin of jacknives, and went on rip
through that and dogs, and bosses, till he owns
a mint of munny, and akers of land that cost
him little or notbin. I lives on a bit of the Ma
jor's land in the mountings. And so after my
letter to you were out, in print, about the death
of "Countryman" and so forth, the Major come
over to my hut, very friendly—he's a mighty
kind man—and sez he "Mr. Cooney," sez he,
"why the h 1 did you write sich a letter to
Izzard ?" Sez be "you'll blow up all our plots;
I hates that man Tomson, and it was me and
some others he had injured, and took away our
gains, that clubbed in to get countryman and
Judas," sez he, "to write him down, and Judas,
poor fellow, ij crazy, that nobody can tell his
meanin' and now you've gone and testified that
Countryman is ded; and so the Grips family has
nary friend." Sez I dear Major I didn't know
all that, or I'd of hated Tomson too. Sez he
"Mr. Cooney, that man Tomson has cut me out
of .some of my best trades, only because God
made me a little sharper than some others, and
got the better of 'em in a fair way, as if a man's
wits did not belong to him to be made the most
out of." Sez he, "Mr. Cooney, if a woman and
child is in the way, Torapson wont let any man
get the better ot 'em." "For" sez I "Major,
there's my Jenny and the children ; 'spose I were
to die, wouldn't it be a great comfort to me to
knofv that tbe Judge would see that nobody
should get the advantage ot 'era when I was
gone." I fear Major all tbe women and the hus
bands too will be agin us on that Sez he
"d n Jenny and the children; haven't I ta
ken care of you and them tor nothin but what
you all could do, which ain't much ? Get me
out of this scrape and turn agin Tomson, or you
don't go a Coon huntin from my bouse any
more." So I turns round voluntary, Mister Iz
zard, of my own tree will, and hope you won't
print any more of my letters. I don't know
whether Countryman is ded or not, and I don't
believe be is, tho I seed it with my own eyes.—
Now you may think strange of this, but Major
Grips and me goes for effect. The Major says
he don't believe a word about Torason not doin
enuff work, and the sleepin docket, and all that
stuff. He sez he llelieves Torapson does a d—d
sight too much work, delvin over tbera pesky
chancery papers, aud interferes with bis and
other people's conscience, and shortinin their
profits, and ne knows that when he don't get to
the Courthouse in time he's a workin hard over
them very things, to make thrivin men disgorge
their gains; and as to the sleepin' docket, the
Major says there's no delays ot justice about that
but he believes that Tomson keeps all tbem
cases laid by, then, after he has done all in one
that be can do—jist like so many tarings around j
poor birds' legs to draw the poor things in and
prevent them flying tree. The Major says be had
a dreadful battle with a woman iv the Chance
ry Court, agin an annuity she claimed out of a
piece of land he bad bought cheap. The wo
man, be sez, beat him, and Torapson give her a
big decree agin him, to pay up all that was
back. Tbe Major sez he granted mightily but
thinkin he was done with the creator he paid
up; when lo and behold, here tother day Tomp
son pulled tbe string around his leg and sprawl
ed him flat of bis back under another big decree
for all the instalments that fell due to the wo
man since the first decree, which the Major had
hoped the woman had forgotten. But the Ma
jor says "all's fair in war, and if Fults and Judas
and Countryman can make the people believe a
bout the wheels of justice and the sleepin dock
et, why it's a spoke in their wheel that he is not
agoin to break, and if Fults turns Tomson out,
its all right; for be hates Tomson on account of
his being kept tied and hurtin bim. And Mis
ter Izzard I hates him too, of my own free will,
unless be will let Major Grips and his whole
family alone, and allow them to make what they
can. Now the Major sez, that if the people
know that only he and the like of him was suffer
in by Torason, they would only laugh at him
and like Tomson the better for punishin of him.
So he sez he and all the Grips family, which
ain't small, are determined to stand by and back
up all that kin be said agin him ; and I am too
Mister Tzzard, so don't you go and print this let
ter. From this time forth Igo for Fults; and
my doctrine is let every man, woman and child
take care of themselves. I intend too to do all
I can for Judas and for the executors of my de
ceased Countryman. As the Major says "d—n
Jenny and the children." All wbicli I tell you
again Izzard is written of my own fee will and
accord, for the Major is a good man, and would
not tyranize over any one. No more from me
now and forever. Cooney.
Medical use of Salt. —In many cases of
disordered stomach, a tea-spoonful of salt is a
certain cure. In the violent internal aching,
termed colic, add a tea spoonful of salt to a pint
of cold water —drink it and go to bed ; it is one
of the speediest remedies known. The same
will revive one who seems almost dead from a
heavy fall. /
In an apoplectic fit, no time should be lost in
pouring down salt and water, if sufficient sensi
bility remain to allow the swallowing; if not,
the head must be sponged with cold water until
the senses return, when the salt will immediately
restore the patient from the lethargy.
In a fit, the feet should be placed in warm
water, witli mustard added, and the legs briskly
rubbed, all bandages removed from the neck,
and a cool apartment procurtd if possible.
In many cases of severe bleeding at the lungs,
and when other remedies failed, Dr. Rush tonnd
two spoonfuls of salt completely stayed the
blood.
In cases of a bite from a mad dog, wash the
part with strong brine for an hour ; then bind
on salt with a rag.
In tooth-ache, salt and warm water held to
the part, and renewed two or three times, will
relieve in most cases. If the gnms be affected,
wash the mouth with brine ; if the teeth be tar
tared, wash them twice a day with salt water.
In swelled neck, wash the part in brine twice
a day until cured.
A Rotal Bed-Chambeb.—The Empress Eu
gene, of France, is fitting a magnificent private
bed-chamber for herself, into which, perhaps,
His Majesty will be allowed to look occasionally.
The coloring of the walls is in chalk. In the
oentre is a medallion in marble of the Empress,
with the Graces crowning her with garlands,
the Arts presenting their tributes, and Fame
flying around. In the ceiling, also, is a Zephyr,
surrounded with clouds, and carrying a basket
of flowers, from which Cupid rises with a bow
and arrow ; likewise Aurora, before whom the
Genii of the night are represented retiring. The
figure of Cupid is a portrait of the Prince Impe
rial. ______
M. Silverman bafTbeen pursuing certain in
vestigations, from which be arrives at a conclu
sion that the average height of the human race
has remained unchanged since the Chaldean ep
och, four thousand years age.
Tbe editor ot a Wisoonsin paper speaks of a
place where be sa. s "brass coin passes as mon
ey." He had better emigrate there. There his
face would be always good for a drink.
One contented with what he has done, stands
but a small chance ot becoming famous for what
he will do. He has laid down to die—the grass
ia already growing over him.
For the Spectator.
Judicial Election.
\ Editors Spectator —Gentlemen:—Although
i nothing has been written or printed, much has
I been said, against Judge Thompson about a
' criminal trial that took place in the county of
i Augusta some time ago. For the purpose of
t doing Judge T. justice and setting the public
> mind right on that subject, 1 propose a very
i brief examination of tbe case—without naming
- the case the public will understand the allusion.
Let me remind all of those who are hostile to
Judge Thompson on account of the part he acted
in that case, that the cause was finally removed
to an adjoining county, before another Judge,
where the very same testimony was heard aud
a verdict of acquittal rendered and approved by
the community in which the trial was had.—
Let me remind them that if a party is to be
oonvicted, it must be done according to the rules
of law and evidence —not upon outside opinions
founded upon many things that cannot be heard
and considered at the bar of justice.
Let me remind them that if tbe verdict of a
Jury is contrary to law and evidence, or either,
it is not not only the privilege of the Judge, but
his bounden duty, to set it aside and grant a new
trial. This duty is one of the safety valves in
the Organization of our Courts of justice.
Let us examine the case referred to. That
the Commonwealth produced testimony on her
part, although of a circumstantial character,
enough to warrant a conviction, I will not deny,
but the whole case turned upon the testimony
of one witness who was introduced for the ac
cused, who swore to nothing in direct conflict
with the evidence ot the Commonwealth, but to
additional facts, which, if true, relieved the ao
cused of criminality—resting the whole case
upon her testimony. The Jury very honestly,
no doubt, disregarded her testimony, and found
a verdict of guilty. A motion was made to tbe
Court for a new trial, upon the ground that the
verdict of the Jury was against the evidence.
In delivering his opinion, Judge Thompson
"stated all of the legal rules by which testimony
was impeached in Courts of Justice, none of
which applied to the witness tor the accused ;
and not being thus impeached, he said that we
are bound to receive it—that our lives and lib
erties and our rights to our property depended
on human testimony, aud to reject it unim
peached there would be no stopping point."—
Whilst tbe guilty must and ought to be punished,
the law must be preserved, outside opinion must
not be allowed to run riot over the law.
If that witness swore falsely and a guilty par
ty has gone unpunished, tbe fault is not with
Judge Thompson—on the witness rests tbe re
sponsibility. If, on the contrary, tbe witness
told the truth, Judge T. saved an innocent man
from disgrace and punishment ; and when all
shall be revealed judge Thompson will stand
justified.
Let me beg those to remember who would
find fault with Judge Thompson on account of
the trial referred to, that they are bound to be
lieve that Judge T. was honest and conscientious
in what be did; sitting, as he was, within a
few hundred yards of the spot where the tragedy
occurred, in the midst of a community that had
been deeply excited by the occurrence—a com
munity, too, entertaining pretty strong prejudices
against tbe accused and witness on account of
their religious doctrines—bis term of office soon
to expire, knowing no difference of places of birth
or religious belief, (even if his judgement erred,
which is not admitted) did he not display a
courage that is rare in these days of subserviency
in doing what he believed was right, and in ac
| cordance with the sentiments and feelings of his
heart, on the side ot innocence and mercy, car
rying out the humane and benign maxim of the
law "That it is better that ninety and nine
guilty men should escape than that one innocent
man should suffer." Justice.
"I Don't Dance."—A plain, unlettered man,
from the back country in the State of Alabama,
came to Tuscaloosa, and on the Sabbath went
early to church. He seleoted a seat in a conve
nient slip, and awaited patiently the assembling
of the congregation. The services commenced.
Presently the music of a full-toned organ burst
upon his astonished ear; he had never heard
one before. At tbe same time the gentlemen
who owned the slip came up the aisle, with bis
lady leaning upon bis arm. As be approached
the door of the slip he motioned to give place
to the lady. This movement the countryman
did not comprehend, aud from tbe situation of
the gentleman and lady, associated as it was in
his mind with tbe music, he immediately con
cluded that a cotilion, or a French contra dance,
or some other dance was intended. Rising
partly from his seat he said to him—"Excuse
me, sir—excuse me, if you please, I don't dance."
A schoolmaster who had an inveterate habit
of talking to himselt, was asked what motive he
could have in doing so ? He replied that he had
two good reasons. "la the first place, he liked
to talk to a sensible man; and in the next place,
he liked to hear a sensible man talk."
"Won't you take my word, sir, when I tell
you I will call and pay your bill on Saturday
morning next?" said a delinquent debtor to a
dunning creditor, with whom he had very sharp
words. "No, sir," replied the other, "I had
rather you would keep your word."
A clergyman, while engaged in catechising a
number ot boys in a class, asked one of them for
a definition of matrimony. The reply was:
A place of punishment, where some fools suf
fer for a time, before they go to heaven.
Good boy, said the clergyman, take your seat.
Virtue is like the precious odors, most fra
grant when they are incensed or crushed; for
prosperity doth best discover vice, but adversi
ty doth best discover virtue.
During an examination, a medical student be
ing asked the qaestion, "When does mortifica
tion ensue?" replied: "When you pop the
question, and are answered 'No.' "
The best lip-salve in creation is a sweet kiss.
The remedy, however, should be used with
great care, as it is very apt to bring on an af
fection of the heart.
There is a relief in ridicule and good-natured
satire. Laughing at the misoonduct of the world
will, in a great measure, ease us of any disagree
able passion abont it.
"Have you any travelling inkstands ?" asked
a lady of a young stationer.
"No, Ma'am, we have them with feet and legs
but they are not old enough to travel yet."
The Welsh have a saying that it a woman was
as quick with her feet as with her tongue, she
would catch lightning enough to kindle the fire
in the morning.
A horrid old bachelor, speaking of the ladies 1
fashions, says the people could get out of a
church a great deal better, if there were not
quite as much bustle at the door.
A "Moral Debating Society," oat West, is
engaged in a discussion on tbe following question,
"It a husband deserts his wife which is the most
abandoned —the man or the woman ?"
Make good use of time, if thou lovest eterni
ty ; yesterday cannot be recalled —to-morrow
cannot be secured—to-day only is thine, which,
once lost, is lost forever.
The editor of the Bethel (Me.,) Courier thus
defines a lady's bonnet: "A bit of straw at
taced to a bit of ribbon." A litte bitten that.
It is said that the Yankee who was at the
point of death, whittled it off with his jack knife
and got well.
A newspaper was started not long ago, the
first number of which contained a letter from a
correspondent, who signed himself "a constant
reader."
Wonder if the mau who plowed the deep and
thee planted his foot on his native soil has ever
harvested the crop ?
NO. XIX.