Running for president is perhaps the most surefire way to destroy your family life and depress your close relatives forever. Just imagine if your spouse came in and said, "I've decided I want to run for president." Does anyone ever react positively to this announcement? "Oh great THANKS A LOT, FUCKO," seems like the appropriate response. Because within 24 hours, the national news will find and play that S&M porno you shot in college, on repeat. "Does America want a president," the news anchor will say, "whose spouse is a whore?"

Presidential runs are bad news all around when you're the family. And that's why possible candidate Haley Barbour's wife, Marsha, for one, is spending her days in constant terror these days.

Marsha Barbour, the wife of Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour, told WLOX-TV on Thursday that the prospect of her husband running for president in 2012 "horrifies me."

"It's been a lot to be the first lady of the state of Mississippi, and this would be 50 times bigger," she told the television station. [...]

"It's an overwhelming task, and he's going out and doing some things just to see if he gets that fire in his belly," Marsha Barbour told the station. "If he's not passionate about it, there's no reason for him to run."

Take a hint, Haley. Don't do it. Wife doesn't want it; you can't have it.

But like many presidential candidate wives in the past, she'll put up with it if she has to. But only if God cuts her a deal: "If God and Haley decide to do it, I'm sure God will give me strength to be a good partner." Can't you just hear her sighing when you read that sentence? She's not into this at all.