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So she is acting weird. Mood swing from out the blue and randomness that got you stuck in awkward moments you would rather not be a part of. Wondering what to do because clearly something has to be done to avoid further reincarnations of Hiroshima and Nagasaki due to Aunt Flow’s monthly visits. Pain, hormones and a whole lot of things contribute to making this time of the month horrible for most women. One minute she is happy and bubbly, the next moment she is in a pool of her own tears. For some people the level of predictability is so low that those around them (especially the men in the lives) end up not knowing what to do to salvage the situation. But- worry not with the help of a couple of friends, I have managed to compile what I would like to term the gentlemen’s guide to surviving your woman’s menses. This is a short list of Dos and Don’ts that could help you put a smile on that special someone’s face and make her better company than she otherwise would have been.

Dos

Make her comfortable to talk about what’s going on

Most men tend to shut down when it comes to this topic… yes -blood is rather a gruesome topic to discuss without being squeamish or queasy but sometimes she doesn’t really want to go into detail about what is happening to her. Sometimes all she wants is to be able to talk about her emotions without you flinching… or to mention the pain without you switching off before she has time to say anything else. Sometimes the difference between a good day and a bad day for your hormonal someone is that willing ear ready to listen to her talk about what’s gotten her moody and grumpy.

Random acts of kindness

Nothing brightens a person’s day more than gestures which show that someone has been thinking about them. These acts need not be extravagant or big. Small simple acts will suffice. All she needs to know right now is that although you might be powerless to help her, you do care and you would want to be there for her.

Be in tune with her needs

You have been with her for several months, by now she expects that you have picked up on quite a number of her habits as well as her likes and dislikes. This is the perfect time to show her that you have been paying attention to her, listening to her when she pours out her hear to you. You could show this by knowing her cycle and one day appearing with just the right brand of pads and the painkillers she usually uses.

Don’ts

Belittle her

From your perspective periods need not be such a big deal right? I mean it’s only just a little bit of blood (just a few tablespoons) and the pain really isn’t much to write home about. It really isn’t enough to justify all the fuss kicked up by most women (missing school/work, crying, complaining etc.). But in all honesty, periods do deserve the hullabaloo surrounding them. They are indeed a big deal and need to be treated as such. Give the topic the importance it deserves and you will go a long way in ascertaining that you make it to number one on the best boyfriend list.

Compare her cycle or behaviour to another females

Your sister, mother, friend or whoever might not have been as needy during her period because she had it easy or she frankly just didn’t need any of your assistance. So just because she is a little too loud or a little more emotional or in a little more pain than you are used to it doesn’t mean that she is faking it so she can be the recipient of a little more attention. What you need to keep in mind is that every female is different. Our ovaries might all release and egg but the way our body responds varies with each person hence the need to treat us as unique individuals at all times.

There you have it gents… a very short list – that way it will be quite easy to memorise and understand (lol). There is a lot more though that could have made it to this list and in the comments section below, I would like to hear what you think should be added to or subtracted from the list….

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tanyaradzwa masaire(Ty'ra Vanadis)

Ty'ra Vanadis is a pen name that I use when I'm writing.
As a person what defines me is my mind, my heart as well as my passion for art.
My emotions, thoughts and dreams all find expression through the words that i write.
I believe that a person who has allowed himself to dream, has given himself the key to the ultimate freedom because only through ones dreams can one hope to break the barriers that lock them out of their Eden, only through dreams can one attain wings to fly and soar to heights hitherto not reachable and only through dreams can one remove all the borders and barriers that prevent them from entering into lands not explored before.
Hence my uninhibited exploration of my dreams and visions through poetry and prose because only through this can i be truly free and gain freedom from all sorts of negativity