She’s an amazing young woman with straight As and a college scholarship lined up for when she graduates from high school this spring at age 17.

She’s a peer tutor who runs programs at school for at-risk youth using some of what she learned at a summer arts program last year. And, she volunteers 20 hours a week.

She’s also homeless.

Unsurprisingly, the principal and teachers at her school describe her as “exceptional” and “very, very special.”

But she’s locked in a battle with the Ministry of Children and Family Development. Afraid to go home, this exceptional girl may be the only teen in British Columbia who has ever begged to be taken into government care only to be repeatedly rebuffed.

I’m not using her name or any identifying details because she is a minor and because she needs and deserves protection, not attention.

Because of privacy laws, I can’t identify anyone connected with her case.

For now, the First Nations teen is staying at a youth safe house. But any day, she could be turned out because she’s already overstayed the shelter’s seven-day limit by several months.

The ministry could even order the government-supported shelter to turn her out because of a social worker’s contrarian thinking that the best place for the teen is at home with a family that she and those familiar with her case describe as worse than chaotic.

She has asked for her own social worker, not the one assigned to her family. The representative for children and youth has appointed an advocate for her, but the advocate works 775 kilometres away from where the teen lives. Because she has no phone, their primary means of communication is via email.

What she’s asked is to be placed into a foster home or a semi-independent living situation with other youth who get daily support from counsellors.

Unlike many teens in care who want to be put on a youth agreement and given the freedom to live on their own, she fears that.

She’s afraid that the “black monster” whose voice encouraged her to cut herself at 12 and attempt suicide at 15 might come back if she were living alone in some basement suite.

“The ministry is doing nothing to help me,” she says. “As teens and young kids we see posters and ads saying if you’re feeling unsafe to call and you’ll get help. It takes guts to leave. But I did that and I’m still waiting for someone to help me ... My life is crumbling and nobody is helping me.”

The irony is not lost on either of us that we first met on Family Day.

More than anything else, what this teen wants is to break the cycle of addiction, violence and sexual abuse that is a hallmark of her family.

Her biological father is an addict living on Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside. Her first stepfather had a penchant for violence and was eventually diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic.

Her second stepfather is an alcoholic, who she says is violent and has threatened to kill her mother on several occasions and has made inappropriate sexual comments to her and her friends. The mother has denied all those claims to the social worker, but acknowledged them in writing to her daughter.

A few years ago, the teen says she and her brother earned their allowance tending the “babies” (seedlings) in the marijuana grow-op in the family home. Sometimes they were paid in product rather than money. The house burned down; faulty wiring was the cause. Fortunately, no one was injured.

There’s much more to her life story, but you get the picture.

“My teachers are like mothers, the safe house is like my family,” she says. “They’re the ones who got me presents for my birthday and at Christmas. All of them are helping me, but my family is not.”

She remains in contact with her mother, loves her, misses hugging her and is very concerned about her mother’s safety.

But, she says, “I don’t want my life to revolve around all of that.”

Although she wants to be freed from her mother’s guardianship, the teen doesn’t want to be set adrift to fend for herself.

“Why does my Mom have to agree [to me going into care]. She’s the one who is not seeing reality. Am I supposed to be homeless all my life? My Mom is saying [if you don’t want to live at home] get a job ...

“But how am I supposed to balance that with volunteering, going to school, homework? How do I do that?”

Her dream is simple enough: To be the first in her family to graduate from high school and go to college. In fact, her dream is also in line with the B.C. government’s stated goal of increasing aboriginal graduation rates and ought to be attainable.

“I know the stats: 53 per cent of aboriginal youth drop out,” she says. “I don’t want to be that statistic. But what choice are they [the ministry] giving me? If I drop out then I really will be spending my life in the welfare system.”

She regrets ever mentioning that she has First Nations ancestry. When it comes to First Nations kids, she fears that the ministry is more concerned about keeping families together than with keeping children safe.

If she wasn’t First Nations, the teen believes she would have been in ministry care long ago.

“I’ve been crying every single night because I don’t know where I’m going to be next week. I’m so tired of going in circles. How long can I run in these circles. How long can someone be strong before they can’t be strong anymore? I’m homeless. Where am I supposed to go?” she asks.

This is a girl who should be excited about the future. But that’s almost impossible given her situation.

“Sometimes I walk along a bridge and the black monster comes in and asks whether it would be high enough if I jumped ... And I wonder if I did just pass away would [the ministry] recognize that I’m not lying. Would my Mom?”

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