I haven’t written much about my health the last few years on der Stonegauge… Mostly because Stonegauge is syndicated on the ever-so-excellent Tampa Blab where some of my blog colleagues (who know me better from my endeavor at Boltsmag or my participation at Sticks of Fire) can get wind of this stuff and start fussing and worrying about me. So can my critics as well with anything personal I write about on here. I’ve had private stuff published on this domain before and had it come back to hurt me. But that’s what happens when you blog, ain’t it?

I’m getting away from the fact that I said I haven’t talked about my health much at all on here lately. For the uninitiated, I suffer from a rare genetic disease commonly referred to as NF2. It’s a nasty little gem of a disease that doesn’t get much attention (besides an odd mention on House M.D. every-so-often). It causes benign tumors to grow mostly on nerves in the body. One of said tumors were the reason I began to lose my hearing as a teen and was rendered deaf 10 years ago last December.

It also gives me the supernatural abilities like super-intelligence, telekenisis and empathy along with…

Seriously… The last time I really brought up (bitched, moaned, vented, etc) my health was the summer and fall of 2003 when I hit a couple of hard patches and was frustrated, scared and just flat out torn up (to put it lightly). Blogging things publicly helped me get my frustrations and worries out in the open… or at least out of my head for the moment until the next panic hit.

It’s 4 years later and I’ve got problems again. Problems in my head this time that get the doctors attention. Now, from the smart-ass perspective, you’d quickly quip “Yeah, anyone who (inserts a thought, political idea, interest, etc) would be classified as having problems in the head!” but it’s a little more serious than that. About 5 centimeters worth of serious. Between-my-ears, behind-my-eyes serious.

Still, there are risks and even if they aren’t substantial — what they are is a worst case scenarios. So I worry about that, even though it’s almost like thinking about worst-case stuff when you go out and do day to day things.
“The worst case scenario while driving to the Supermarket to pick up milk is that an out of control mack truck with a drunk at the wheel, plows into my car and explodes…. Oh, and I don’t die instantly on impact!”

Rosy, cheery stuff like that.

So part of my mind (ha — the cause of all my problems) keeps wanting me to be responsible and at least report this upcoming operation, make arrangements for the “just in case”, “worst case scenario” type things. Every other part of me wants the status quo to remain — though that status quo is a deteriorating personal conditions where the changes in my health are more or less subtle until I get to a tipping point and things really get messed up and my life hangs in the balance.

Rosy, cheery stuff like that.

I don’t want to face the idea of things — out of my control — go bad and yet with responsibilities to friends and loved ones, how can I not?

After nearly four years of working together to build good communities, Scout.com and Fanhome.com have agreed to shake hands and end our relationship effective November 14, 2006.

Fanhome has been deeply integrated into the Scout ecosystem, and we need to advise how this transition may impact you.

First, this change will not affect your status with Scout in any way – your registrations and passwords remain the same.

Second, because you registered with us through a Fanhome-managed message board, Fanhome may decide to email you directly about its new online efforts. Fanhome does not have your password or any credit card information, however, which will remain secure and privately held by Scout.

If Fanhome does email you, they are required to make it easy for you to opt out of future emails from Fanhome.

Thank you,
Scout.com Staff

I was on the sidelines but involved a bit in people growing disillusioned with Scout.com and FanHome this late summer. I simply advised on certain things before growing annoyed with some too-deep details of the day to day infighting on Scout/FanHome/The Score Boards.

I don’t know what Kevin (the creator of the FanHome.com sports network) is planning to do from here but this move itself brings about a sigh of relief from members of the FanHome community, wherever they might be.

I’m officially the father of “the definitive online source for local hockey news.” So Sayeth the St. Petersburg Times in their online blog list which puts the spotlight on Boltsmag this week.

I almost expected this featured status last week, with the opening of the Hockey season on Wednesday but it was for naught — damn you TampaBlab! 😛 🙂 ) — suffice it to say, I am fine with having the featured status this week instead…

…Well, except for the fact I am going out of town and my focus is not on hockey this week. 🙁 Oh well, I’ll live… And so shall Boltsmag!

If anyone hasn’t watched TV and seen the faces and heard the stories of people who have been effected by Hurricane Katrina, you’re fortunate.

If you’ve blamed them for staying in New Orleans or where they are — all the while being happy with how the Government has cut your taxes or happy that Corporations are racking up huge profits… you’re part of the problem…

You might have caught Kanye West tonight on NBC’s concert special to raise relief money for victim’s of Hurricane Katrina. If you missed it, Kanye said on air (before a hasty cut by NBC to Chris Tucker) “George W. Bush doesn’t care about black people.”

Though I can grasp Kanye’s sentiment and where he’s coming from, he’s shooting with the wrong gun by making this statement. The race card doesn’t have to come out as-so-much a more observant look at what is gone wrong with this country.

The weak / slow response to Hurricane Katrina (to put it simply) represents how the separation the President and most of the government from the people (both parties are guilty of this at current). There is the aristocratic class of businessmen and politicos, donors and blind supporters that get top-of-the-line treatment with focus on issues that are concerns of theirs (wedge issues that do not effect day to day life – Abortion, gay marriage, FCC decency standards, etc) while the issues that effect the general populous (being of any race, creed or color) get ignored. Infrastructure is falling apart in the US, schools are in atrocious conditions, health care and insurance are domineered by for-profit corporate interests that keeps people from protection and medical care they need. Poverty is on the rise (and has been the last 4 years) yet you are told a rosie economic picture from the government or talking head economists because the only thing that matters is the statistics or the investor class… Not the people working, not the pay rates of the blue collar class. Not the fact minimum wage has not been raised for 8 years. Just profit margins.

I don’t think it’s a black-and-white thing that Kanye said (and other African Americans are going to agree with) as-so-much a rich-vs-poor thing. Aristocrats-vs-commoners thing. Many of us commoners can’t even begin to comprehend how bad poverty is… You can hear it anyplace they talk about the tragedy that is New Orleans: “They should have gotten out! They should have gotten to Superdome, they should have… they should have…” We can assign blame but we can’t understand the logic. We can assign blame but we can’t grasp their lives. We can assign blame but many of us would take the same route in our suburban homes that these people did in their urban apartments and houses.

We truly don’t understand shit with regards to poverty and the plight of the working class if we’re going to keep allowing corporate interests and special interests to control the country with their interests at heart, not the interests of the citizens of the United States. I don’t believe Bush can grasp what the common person suffers. I could never believe John Kerry (or Hillary Clinton) would be able to comprehend it either, or Al Gore… It’s the same-old aristocrat class that is so out of touch with America that we suffer at their ineptitude.

In fact we’re dying because of their out-of-touch status.

Kanye’s blast at Bush is a blast at the fact the government has turned a blind eye on these people — and they’ll continue to do so from both parties unless we wise up and vote with our heads… We need leadership in this country, and we’re not going to get it from someone who doesn’t understand what it is to live among the people.

The Dog is supposed to be six weeks old today. I haven’t seen a picture yet. I haven’t heard much of anything at all. I’m eager to hear and at the same time – I’m hearing nothing.

There was a dog I was told about by Jenna before I met Kerrie Kuper, this dog was in Orlando – another Whippet – and the his family was considering moving into a place where no dogs would be allowed. They loved Rip, but they would have to give him up… Or not. Jenna kept me informed about Rip’s status and as it turned out – Rip wasn’t going anywhere…. Supposedly.

Yesterday I found out that he was given away to someone in St. Petersburg, some time ago. I got to see his picture and I got to get angry because I missed out on my opportunity to already have a dog instead of waiting… Waiting in ignorance…. Waiting anxiously. Waiting…