What's In a (Utah) Name?

by Cari Bilyeu Clark

When my husband and I moved from Utah to the Washington, D.C. area seventeen years ago, we knew nothing of the inadvertent legacy we carried from our four years in Utah. Shortly after we arrived in our new home, we saw a television commercial for a local grocery store chain. The spokeswoman's name was the unusual "Odonna." "She's gotta be from Utah," I said to my husband. "That's a Utah name if I ever heard one."

We eventually learned that Odonna was, indeed, Utah born and bred.

It dawned on us that many names we'd heard during our college careers, and found only mildly remarkable, were indeed unique to the Utah Mormon culture. Thus began our quest to define what makes some names singularly Utahn, and what sets them apart from ethnic names with roots in other cultures, such as Juanita or Shoshanna; or African-American names such as Tawanda and Shaquille; or the newly common, soap-operaesque handles such as Skylar, Tiffany, Raven, and Adrienne. There's a difference, and it's not just the obviously Mormon scriptural names like Mahonri or Nephi or Moroni. Often identifying a Utah name is a gut feeling akin to Justice Potter Stewart's definition of pornography: you know it when you see it.

The quintessential Utah name often has a French-sounding prefix such as Le-, La-, Ne-, or Va-. Often names appear to have genesis in the combined names of the parents--Veradeane or GlenDora, for example. Related is the practice of feminizing the father's name--as in Vonda (dad is Vaughan) or Danetta. Others, such as Snell or Houser, appear to be surnames called into service as first names.

Related is the curious tendency, more common in Utah than elsewhere, for men (women do not seem to do this) to use the first initial, then the full middle name as the given name, such as L. Flake Roberts, who ran for office in Utah County when we lived there. (Come on, you've noticed this habit among the general authorities of the LDS church!) Besides puzzling over why someone would want to be known as "Flake," it makes one wonder just what the "L" stands for.

[Hmmmm. Where have we heard about that before? --A.J.]

So my husband and I entertained ourselves by collecting the often bizarre names we found in Utah publications (including the obituaries, which indicates that this is not a recent fad) and of Utah natives we met. We compiled a list and shared it with our friends, who often as not had a few more to add. We really hit a bonanza when one woman shared our observations with her mother, who worked at a Utah bank and had access to lots of names. She started her own list and began sending the names to us. (My personal favorite, LaNondus, came from this source.) Another friend told us of a set of sisters, all of whose names began with "Ja."

Once my husband had Internet access, he collected more names and corresponded with another couple who amused themselves the same way. They made cleverly categorized lists: "The ward choir director's daughters: LaVoice, Choral, Audia."

It makes you wonder what some parents were thinking when, for instance, they named their baby girl Lanae (la-nay)--and she unfortunately ended up with a big nose (le nez [la-nay] in French means "the nose"). Or the girl named M'Lu--are clever wags endlessly asking her to skip to it? And how the heck do people with apostrophes in their names fill out computerized forms? There's no apostrophe space. The guy I really pity, though, is the one saddled with the unfortunate moniker, Rube.

Of course, parents cannot predict what new interpretations the marketplace will bring to the names they lovingly bestow on their offspring. I once worked at a company which had dealings with a woman named LaPriel (pronounced la-prell). When I told my former roommate about this inexplicable first name, she sardonically replied, "What's her sister's name--LaTegrin?"

With the generally larger-than-average family, often saddled with the very ordinary surnames Smith, Johnson, or Young, it's not surprising that many Utah parents look for unique given names for their children. When you throw in the reverence for family and ancestors forwarded by the LDS Church, it seems inevitable that someone would end up with LaEarl, KDell, Arnolene or Hariella.

Some names, though, seem to defy description--if not pronunciation. While pride of place may have spawned Utahna, how did somebody come up with Wealtha? And while Lloydine's genesis seems plausible, how on earth were Printha or Noy coined? And I have no idea what constitutes the correct pronunciation for Kairle or Tawhnye. (I suspect they may be wildly creative spellings of Carol and Tonya.)

Perhaps the following list (by no means comprehensive) will amuse you. Perhaps it will offend you. Perhaps you will find your name, or the name of a relative, on it. Or perhaps you will be so enchanted by a particular name that you'll want to bestow it upon one of your own offspring. If that is your plan, first do this: go to the back door, fling it open and yell the name at the top of your lungs six or eight times, because that's how it's going to be heard for the next eighteen years. And remember, when little Wynante (boy or girl, you choose) grows up, you'll have to live with the consequences.

In a class of their own (In fact, I'm not sure I believe these but we asked for details and a confirmation and got convincing replies, so here they are): NaLa'DeLuhRay, Phakelikaydenicia, Zaragrunudgeyon ("Zarg," for short), Jennyfivetina, Tiarrhea, Nudity, VulvaMae, DaLinda LaDale, Tugdick, Saunsceneyouray, and, yes... Clitoris.

["Well, it sounded pretty when the doctor said it, and my wife Placenta likes it."]

"You have verfied something I have said frequently and been told is not true.A Mormon woman is alomost blackmailed into being sweet and compliant"

I have verified no such thing. As I said before, God will work out the cases where one spouse is not to blame according to his wisdom.

...the realization that if her husband does not call her she can never get into the celestial kingdom

Read #79, as long as a person (either the husband or the wife) live the gospel as best they can, they lose NOTHING. What their spouse does or doesn't or can't do has no impact on their own exhaltation, so no 'blackmail' is possible.

And do you call it blackmail when God says a person must obey to get to heaven?

Illbay, take a good look at the Beehive House and the Lion House. There were smaller houses for other wives of BY. And while you are at it, a side trip to Colorado City to get a good idea of what life in the Utah territory was like might be instructive. If you are not willing to look at either site, shut your piehole.

***Do you belive a person who dies believing in Jesus Christ as their Savior and believing that Joseph Smith is a true prophet and that Mormonism is the true gospel will enter heaven?***

There are two contradictory gospels at play here. Jesus + Joe is a denial of Jesus. Mormonism is another gospel either fabricated by Joe Smith or received from demonic personages. Evidence indicates the former.

Do you belive a person who dies believing in jesus Christ as their Savior and believing that Mohammed is a true prophet and that Islam is the true religion will enter heaven?

I met one LaDonna but most folks I knew from big families had normal names. :-) I guess yelling a common name at family reunions can be difficult for a huge family (my friend was 1 of 11 kids with a ton of cousins)

"How do you know if the dead husband accepted mormonism in the next life?"

Don't know really, but given the situation I would say it is unlikely.

"And would he not be kept out of the celestial kingdom anyway as he was never through the necsessary ordinances??"

We don't really know at what point the line is drawn and God says you had your chance and don't get another in the spirit world. This guy certainly can't claim ignorance, that's for sure.

If you assume he still qualifies for a chance in the spirit world, and if you assume he truely repented, it would still be possible for him to gain full exhaltation (#79), but the woman who was his wife on earth would not be his wife after death. They married 'till death do they part' and she is not interested in being with him any longer than that.

"But a woman can not be exhaulted without her husband..would she become the wife of another man?"

I don't know of any official statement saying yes or no to that. Through temple sealings it certainly is possible for her to be sealed to another man after her death but currently only sealings for couples who were legaly married are done, and those still are conditional on the acceptance of both persons.

In the millenium all required temple work for every person who ever lived will be done, so I expect there will be a lot of revelation to reveal the undocumented parts of humanity's family tree and a great sorting out of all the special cases.

What is doctrine is that God will work it out, and in the end a person who falls short in any way will have only themselves and the choices they made to blame, not the actions of any other person, spouse or otherwise.

"There are two contradictory gospels at play here. Jesus + Joe is a denial of Jesus."

Your opinon. We consider orthodox christianity to be contradictory of the gospel Jesus taught. Bottom line: if we are right, even you still has a chance. If you are right, a person can go to hell for being born in the wrong place and time and THAT is a sad theology IMHO.

"Do you belive a person who dies believing in jesus Christ as their Savior and believing that Mohammed is a true prophet and that Islam is the true religion will enter heaven? "

In the millenium all required temple work for every person who ever lived will be done, so I expect there will be a lot of revelation to reveal the undocumented parts of humanity's family tree and a great sorting out of all the special cases.

If you assume he still qualifies for a chance in the spirit world, and if you assume he truely repented, it would still be possible for him to gain full exhaltation (#79), but the woman who was his wife on earth would not be his wife after death. They married 'till death do they part' and she is not interested in being with him any longer than that.

That is interesting...so a temple worthy mormon woman who had a non mormon husband. , even if he converted after death would not be his eternal wife? I thought they sealed people after death??

I went to his last game. It was a class act (Mrs Gwynn was a piece of work but Tony is a very cool classy dude). He is coaching the Aztec baseball team this year. Jim Dietz handed the team over to Tony.

Follow the thread back, I was talking of a specific case where after the non member husband died, the wife REFUSED to be sealed to him and instead married a faithfull member in the temple some time later.

She could have chosen to have a proxy sealing done for them in the temple if she wanted. If she did and if he repented in the spirit world then they might have been eternal companions, but in reality his actions in life cost him whatever love and respect she once had for him and she was glad to be free of him forever.

Can a woman ever be a godess if her husband does not call her? Can she be in Gods presence in the highest level of the celestial heaven???

R7 I say to you as I said to wrigley

"You are LIKE satan in the Garden of Eden try to beguild the LDS!"

I don't know how many time the LDS have told you we do NOT think about being god or godess even in the Temple. Our focus is on doing Heavenly Father will and our families! It is you who is preoccupy and try to claim that is what we think about, it is you who has impure thoughts about plural marriage. It is you who bring these fruits to the LDS door steps.

They are a prime ingredients to tarish the LDS from the spiritual ignorance of the things from God. It is you and other who would change the definition sacred from God to secret. Now you folks try to lower the bar more call LDS occult!

It you trying to beguild with demands that LDS cast their pearls to anti-LDS swine!

Sadly there are wonderful treasures you children will never know or see because you are so consumed with destroy at all cost!

I can tell you now it will never happen that you or others will ever bring down the "House of the Lord" in this final dispensation! Some of us LDS may faulter, but the WORK of the Lord will NEVER!

It's my opinion that he's just stating the facts, just telling you what the Bible says. (He is.)

As I have often said, I would have much more personal respect for the Mormon who said, "Oh, no doubt about it: you can't believe what the Bible teaches, taken by itself, and Mormonism at the same time. They are mutually exclusive. I just like Joe." (I feel the same about JW's and RC's, for the record; just change the source authorities.)

You up to that sort of honesty? Or are you beating the "Yep! Yessir! There is and only can be but one God  AND one day we'll ALL be Gods! Yep! Salvation is by grace alone through faith alone on the basis of the finished work of Christ alone  AND I have to add my good deeds to it in order to be saved" drum?

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