Attention driver’s license holders from the great lands of New York, Louisiana, New Hampshire, Minnesota, and American Samoa: The Department of Homeland Security has no love for you. [Update: Let’s add Alaska, Arizona, Idaho, Louisiana, Maine, Minnesota, Missouri, Montana, New Hampshire, Oklahoma, Oregon,…

You know when you go on vacation and your friend’s like, “I wanna go with you! Smuggle me in your suitcase!” This was not the same situation when a young boy was found hiding inside of a small, hot pink suitcase at the border of Morocco and the North African Spanish territory of Ceuta. Customs discovered the…

An Oregon man who stripped naked in protest of what he considered invasive search procedures is not guilty of criminal dick wagging, ruled a judge. He was protesting, and protesting is a protected first amendment right. Do you realize what this means? We can ALL take our pants off wherever we want as long as we say…

Just as male politicians attempting to enact legislation that governs the "intrapants marital familiarity area" seem incapable of saying the word "vagina," so too do our terrorism-fighting friends in the Transportation Security Administration. It seems that as they're combing America's walkers, wheelchairs, and…

Your uncontrollable fits of rage toward the TSA haven't gone unnoticed. TSA chief John Pistole recently told a Congressional panel that he plans to implement strategies that are effective, yet allow passengers to travel without the feeling that TSA agents think they've killed someone and are determined to find…

You can rest easy next time you fly, because TSA screeners are ensuring our safety by thoroughly inspecting the chests of breast cancer survivors, and dismissing their pleas for basic human sensitivity.

Perhaps embarrassed by the many YouTube videos in which agents frisk small children while parents look on in horror, the TSA has announced that it will be deemphasizing patdowns in children twelve and under.

In case you were concerned, the TSA remains vigilant in its efforts to protect passengers from bomb-toting tots. Here, an eight-year-old boy gets a patdown — on his way to Disneyland, no less. Luckily, he was found to have no weapons, and the Magic Kingdom could breathe easily for another day.

We've heard plenty of TSA horror stories, but it's just not American airport screeners who traumatize travelers! The Canadian Air Transport Security Authority has apologized for reducing an 82-year-old women to tears after she forgot to mention her breast prosthesis.

There were no major junk-touching skirmishes reported from airports this Thanksgiving travel weekend. But that doesn't mean the pushback is over, not with resurgent reports of young mothers and menstruating women, among others, grabbing headlines.

Rage against the new TSA requirements has tended to erase, or caricature, one very key constituency: air-travel employees. That includes mostly female flight attendants, who, unlike pilots, haven't been exempted from enhanced patdown procedures, as well as reluctant TSA employees.