Starting this month with a time of reflection. Our friends said goodbye to their darling daughter, Hope. She was about 6 weeks old. She fought strong, and her parents loved her with everything they had, but this time, this life was not her for.

james is going up the stairs now. he hadn't even tried the stairs. i was in the kitchen and then came into the living room and didn't see james. i checked all over and started to panic. i looked up the stairs to see if he was on them, no, checked every where else again, panic increasing. i went and checked the stairs again and there he is at the top holding a toy looking for me because i had been calling his name. okay, james has the stairs figured out evidently! no going down yet though.

rynna i'll pm you about facebook too. anyone else want to meet up on there?

nos, no ideas, i like nos i hope everything else is looking up for you.

Just wanted to say Happy Birthday to River!!! I missed it yesterday! I still remember the day he was born, and hearing all about your crazy, lightning bathroom birth...but most of all, I just remember being happy your prodomal labor was done!!!

Sarah...good luck with your little stair climber!

NOS: I'll have to think about the name change...good question. Hey, how's nursing going?

NOS: I'll have to think about the name change...good question. Hey, how's nursing going?

I think we're going to be okay. It was kind of like flipping a light switch once I found out what the Benadryl was doing: the poor baby was hungry and he didn't know how to tell me! The daytime meltdowns where he'd just pitifully throw himself on the floor sobbing have stopped and he seems so much happier.

I've got fenugreek (how much do I take again?) Mother's Milk tea, and I'm about to make myself a humongous bowl of oatmeal.

I never leaked or felt full or pumped,so I don't have those external signs of "drying up" or "increase in supply". I am aware that this is a prime age for nursing strikes which are sometimes mistaken for child led weaning and that there are benefits to getting past them.

I so want to apologize to Rynna for insensitive things I have said in her presence--and also to Dea and anybody else who has had nursing difficulties. I know I have said thoughtless and hurtful things and I am sorry and I hope you know that none of it was intentional, I just didn't understand.

Jezzy I'm uploading photos/videos right now and should have something to share with you soon.

[Smacks herself around the head thoroughly]. NOS, I had no idea that you didn't know that Benadryl will kill your milk supply- that's why I asked if Terran could take it. [smacks a few times more for effect. Allegedly diflucan does the same thing if you take it as a course of medication rather than a one-off dose./] And yeah, nursing strikes are a bitch at this age. Alex was on again off again constantly from the point I got pg again. From what Jenn said, take the fenugreek until you smell like maple syrup and that's your maintenance dose...

I'm on fb too, you know my surname, right? I found Dea and NOS already, so that should be enough to make me pop up annoyingly in your "people you may know" window.

Emily You know I feel slightly cheated that I never really got a chance to try out my river pictures and see if they actually worked? By the time I got the board put together I knew the next time was going to be the real deal

Oh, and I'm off the sugar-free bandwagon. I got thrush Not in my nipples- not yet, anyhow- but it's bad enough that I'm craving sugar in every single form.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.

So when I was taking fenugreek I was taking 8 capsules at a time, but I was warned that it can cause gas pains, which I thought it did, but it was gall stones, blah blah blah. Anyhow apparently a whole fistful is okay.
Also do you have any nutritional yeast (brewer's yeast) it's yummy and it can help too. Remember we had a nursing cookie recipie? Mostly is was oatmeal cookies with brewers yeast and flax seed, made the cookies nutty, really yummy.

Also I never took offense to anything you said. Actually I sympathized. I think I understand what you were feeling.

I think we all need reality checks from time to time. I've got ISSUES about birth. I mostly keep them to myself, but many of the things I hear on MDC bother me. Breastfeeding was easier for me to "get," though I never had supply problems and of course all of my kids could tolerate breastmilk before Bear. I still have issues with regard to child development, but I recognize now that my perspective is very, very warped. We live, we learn.

I have gotten *on* the sugar free bandwagon, and I actually feel decent. I'm still surprised by this. I'm also tired and i should be doing four other things (sleeping chief among them-- it's 3:20 a.m. here) but i am not in large part because Mike is posturing, but refusing more cake icing (the cheap sugar fix... much cheaper than glucose gel, which is ridiculously expensive). He hates the stuff. I have to stay awake until he's normal. : I also have to keep him from waking the kiddos and such. Ugh. I don't want to get up. He's cognizant enough now to recognize the taste of icing in his mouth, so... i guess it could be worse. I know it could be worse.

Rachel, do enjoy it. I only had one baby-baby at this age, and I'm glad I got to experience it.

slgt - for Hope. I remember you posting about her just after she was born.

NOS - Terran is beyond gorgeous. Wow. What a handsome boy. I am so relieved your nursing relationship is back on track. That must be so scary.

I too am on fb - Raina found me

Hillel is charming his mum and dad most of the time (excpet when he won't go to sleep). His cutest is that he *loves* cucumber. When we are eating a salad he picks through until he finds the cucumber and pops it into his mouth.
He too has discovered stairs and can do a whole flight very quickly up.... IL's have lots of stairs, which makes for a very busy someone to be with Hillel as they aren't babyproofing their house.. But with having discovered stairs, I no longer can have Hillel on my lap while I am at a table/desk. He just wants to climb up all the time.... gone are my laid back coffee shop chats with friends - I'm running around after Hillel as I snatch gulps and try and keep the conversation flowing

Helen, with thrush. That is very yucky.... Do you do garlic and yoghurt and TTO?

Yes, in tzatziki- well, not the TTO, obviously. I mostly do canesten in the vagina and diflucan in the mouth, but I haven't got either at the moment so I'm making do with a yoghurt and lavender tampon and going back to see the doctor this afternoon. Steve and I are still arguing the toss on family planning, but it looks like a friction burn helped set this bout off Nice, huh? I'm currently playing the fun "how much can I delay ovulation this cycle?" game. It stinks.

Helen mum to five and mistress of mess and mayhem, making merry and mischief til the sun goes down.

Ugh, Helen, yeast sucks. I"m so on and off the sugar wagon here too. IT's hard with Mr Toona the sugar addict in the house. Happy Birthday to River, BTW, however late. I am still reeling over it being a year!

OH NOS, wish I could see those pics from here, I always love looking at that little cutie. Maybe this will move me to check this from home. I"m so glad you haven't lost your nursing relationship. I know that's so important to you two.

Hiya Sarah! Love the little climbers! Senara likes them too, except twice now she has gotten excited and when she does that she leans back a little, loses her balance and well, kerplunks down a few steps.

Hiya Rachel! so good to see you! Thanks for the update on your sweet little boy.

Rynna, I don't know how you do it. Here's to hoping little Bear is doing well.

Ema-adama, isn't the amazing magnetism of steps something? HOw cute is Hillel and his cucumber lovin' self! I can't wait til they're in season again.

Lookin back at that birth thread, in some ways seems like yesterday and soooo long ago! I had forgotten how very many mommas we had in our group. I hope they're all around and doing well. Has it really been a year? One year ago people were telling me it would be soon and I was telling them, it would be later. Heh.

Senara has discovered the things that gross people out are funny. She's found when she sticks her finger in her nose it makes people get all crazy with the "eww yucky!" statements and it's even more funny because she can pull out a boogie which makes them gross out even more. Also, she's quite amused by farts.

My nephew took two isolated steps this weekend, so I figure 'Nara's got 3.5 week until she does. It's wierd, it works like that often. He does something new, and a few weeks later, she does, it's almost exactly 3.5 weeks later, which is their difference in age. We were all at my dad's house this weekend and Austin and Nara kept my brother and I busy chasing them up the steps. We have his bday party to go to Saturday.

And yeah, have I mentioned her temper? Boy she can throw some fits. I have taken to either setting her down and/or trying to talk to her in a calming voice until she settles down. It's so wierd because I see SO much of my temper style in her. Wish she was more like her daddy, that dude never gets angry.

I'm so overwhelmed remembering this time last year and all of the excitement and anticipation!! I can't believe the baby that was still growing inside me this time last year is standing next to me eating crackers.

I think it would be great if we could share birthday pictures from this year AND reminders of their REAL birth days so we can see how far our February babies have come!!

Senara has discovered the things that gross people out are funny. She's found when she sticks her finger in her nose it makes people get all crazy with the "eww yucky!" statements and it's even more funny because she can pull out a boogie which makes them gross out even more. Also, she's quite amused by farts.

Hilarious. Bear is not a gross-out kid, but I've known quite a few in my days. In fact just last week I was visiting with a nearly-three who had a fistful of rubber/plastic bugs and who was picking his nose **with his tongue**. All I could do was laugh, because he reminded me forcibly of his mother at that age. : (I used to babysit for his mother. Yes, I'm getting old. ) I'm rather enjoying the quiet, observational nature of my little air baby Bear. I can relate to him. He does laugh at farts, though. It's hard not to when your three older siblings think that stinky farts are the hieght of hilarity.

Intentionally comic babes? You've got some sophisticates out there. All we can manage is one twin hiding and giggling while the other twin looks for her, finds her and giggles too. Those are the best moments I have as a mom.

NOS - Oh supply issues! I'm an oatmeal addict myself, now.

My girls are one today!!! They had some authentic New Orleans King Cake courtesy of my sister to celebrate over the weekend. And tonight, after they are having a good birthday sleep, my DH and I will split a bottle of champagne and celebrate our own accomplishments over the year. And remember where we were last year.

Since I can't figure out how to post a pic (they are adorable, and more so by the day), here's a link to my birth story. Times gone by!

It's so wierd because I see SO much of my temper style in her. Wish she was more like her daddy, that dude never gets angry.

UGH! How irritating! I'm glad 'Nara's a little spitfire like her mama. Life is tough and I've BTDT with the whole codependency thing and lost years of my life and at least one of my kids to "Sit down, shut up, be good, do what you're told, and don't make people angry."

Teeny, it sounds like you're doing a wonderful job to help her deal with her feelings and learn socially acceptable ways of dealing with them, communicating them, and standing up for her rights. I'm right there with you when it comes to temper issues, so i hope i don't sound condescending when i say that i think that learning to help our kids will be the best thing we could do to help ourselves.

I'm a Facebook newbie, but pretty recognizable on Raina's friends' list. PM me for my IRL name if you can't find me and want to.

I've had that account absolutely forever but didn't get into it until a bunch of my friends I hadn't been in contact with for 30 years started a group for our school about a week ago. I'm kind of emotional about reconnecting with them, so please just pardon the drama.

Facebook reminds me of a John Barth novel: all the different little subplots of your life come together and merge into a coherant whole and you can see the big picture.

so many birthdays. :
NOS, Terran is just GORGEOUS! He's just going to have all the girls a-twitter over him. My goodness his coloring and hair and eye color is just PERFECT!

Thrush sucks. I had thrush pretty much constantly with Sara. She weaned at 22months and it was the first time we'd gone more than a month wi thout yeast issues. It was a labor of love nursing that girl.

Gracie is SUCH a climber. Stairs, trying to get on the couch, even tried chin-ups on the tv today(it's one of those old GIANT console tv's that weighs more than I do, so no fear, she couldn't topple it. Heck, I can't even move the thing). She will climb anything and everything she can get to. There are very very few things that are out of her reach anymore. And catfood has become a delicacy. Seems she eats more of it than the poor fuzzy boy does.
She's talking quite a bit now. She had a language-splosion in the last few weeks. She says mama, dadda(usually in response to the phone ringing ), all done( ahhh duh), up, and ucky. And she recognizes a lot more. It's been amazing the change in her. She seems like a toddler now. And now that she is RUNNING around the house instead of walking and climbing up and down on everything, it's hard to see her being a baby anymore. She just figured out how to go down 2 stairs tonight.
Thank goodness she's still nursing. At least for a few minutes while she nurses to sleep I can pretend she's still a baby.

Facebook reminds me of a John Barth novel: all the different little subplots of your life come together and merge into a coherant whole and you can see the big picture.

You have an oddly-compartmentalized Friend Wheel too, huh? It's harder to see now because I have more friends, but I've got a whole bunch of friends who aren't connected to anyone (though admittedly some of them ought to be), as well as several small groups which are linked internally but with only a few random offshoots externally. For example, Helen is in the middle of the Feb '08 bunch, with random offshoots to two other DDC to which I belonged (Nov/Dec '02 and May/June '04). If not for those, the Feb '08 bunch would be entirely independant of any of my other groups of friends. The family/people I went to school with groups overlap significantly; They're the big messy clot at the bottom... but there are random offshoots with them as well. I find examining the connections a fun way to kill time. Today, though, I have no time to kill. I came to say : Happy Birthday to Belle and Izzy :, and to : over the fact that I'm on a diet which thinks it's a perfectly reasonable thing to eat something which has 50 kc / serving... all of which come from fat. I walked through the bakery aisle and I wasn't even tempted to buy cupcakes. : Nice.

Happy Birthday to B and I!!! Gena, I just read your birth story...absolutely amazing....you are a strong, amazing mama! What a powerful story. Thanks so much for posting the link!!

Maybe I should get on the no-sugar bandwagon...I have been craving it like it is air...can't be a good thing And how do you know if you have thrush in your nipples? I have gotten random nipple pains lately, once a couple of months ago, and once last week, where its not external at all, but the initial latch on and milk flow are like daggers of pain...then once nursing is up and going, things are ok, unless she tugs or pulls on the nipple...but there is nothing external to see that "hurts"...is this thrush, perhaps?

Terran is wonderful! Thanks for the pics!!

I did something today that I haven't done in 6 months...I pumped milk! This weekend, Sat night to be exact, is the night that I have to be away from Molly. We decided that we aren't going to start any kind of night weaning, we aren't remotely ready yet, and neither is she. So, as of now, our plan is that she is just going to have a sh***y night with dad that night. I will leave loads of pumped milk for her, and DH will co-sleep with her and offer her milk and cuddles all night home till he brings her to me early in the morning where the event is. I can't think of any better plan, still, so that is what we are doing. I "know" she'll be just fine, I still feel frustrated cosmically that these events are conflicting, and I don't have a better solution. Argh...we'll see what happens. I have a sneaking suspicion that she will "punish" me when this is all over...it will be the first time that I haven't been there for her night-wakings, and I think she will be p***ed!!

Applecore: cool story about the birth! I would love to see that once!

Justmama: Grace sounds so "grown up"...in the toddler sense, of course! Molly is still pretty much all baby here.

I am also on Facebook...I'll have to start looking for some of you other mamas...sounds like I should just start on Rynna's page and search her groups!