It has now been almost three days since I was forced to turn my clocks back an hour, marking the end of Daylight Savings Time (DST) and the beginning of Standard Time (ST) . The old saying, “you don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone” definitely applies in this case. As I mentioned, it has been only 68 hours since the transition, and I’ve already slipped into a mild case of (self-diagnosed) seasonal depression!

If you’re not familiar, Standard Time is actually pretty inefficient in maximizing useful sunlight. The concept of Daylight Savings was instituted “to adjust daylight hours to when most people are awake and about.” In other words, Daylight Savings Time = More Evening Daylight. I realize that obviously there just isn’t as much sunlight in the Northern Hemisphere during the winter months (especially the further North you are) as there is during the summer, but that is NO excuse for the sunset to occur at 5:20 PM! The only people I can see enjoying this arrangement are ugly people, people wearing night vision goggles, prostitutes, and ugly prostitutes wearing night vision goggles.

In fact, people claim that the benefits of DST’s extra afternoon sunlight include increased retail sales, reduction of traffic fatalities, and a reduced need for artificial light. Wouldn’t it then make the most sense to do away with Standard Time in favor of DST in the winter months, when daylight hours are at a premium? Luckily, there are a handful of communities around the world full of intelligent people that have done away with Standard Time and observe Daylight Savings Time year-round. For the next 4 months, I’ve pretty much decided I will be spending my time figuring out how to move to one of these magical places. Namely, Pickle Lake, Ontario.