14 Things Girls are REALLY Saying

February 8, 2016

In honor of Valentine’s Day next week I figured I would spread the love by sharing some secrets for my (unmarried) male blog readers. Here are 14 things girls say translated into what they actually mean.

By the way- I wrote this back when I was a single lady. By now realize I have to actually say what I’m thinking because married men don’t try as hard as single men.

1. “We don’t need to do anything special.”

Translation: “It better be extravagant.”

2. “Where did you get those shorts (that shirt, that hat, etc.)?”

Translation: “You look ridiculous. Please never wear that again.”

3. After you make plans and ask if they are okay: “That’s fine…”

Translation: “That is not fine.”

4. “Does this shirt look silly on me?”

Translation: “You better tell me I’m smokin’ hot.”

5. After you arrive at a restaurant: “I’m not that hungry…”

Translation: “I’m starving but I want you to think I eat healthy so I probably won’t order much then eat all of yours.”

6. “I’m getting kind of tired.”

Translation: “Take me home already. This is getting creepy.”

7. After messaging a girl on Facebook: No response.

Translation: “You’re a creep.”

8. After she gets her wallet out and you offer to pay: “Oh, you don’t have to do that!”

Translation: “I can’t believe I had enough time to get my wallet all the way out of my purse.”

9. “Don’t let me win!”

Translation: “Let me win, but don’t let me know you let me.”

10. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

Translation: “You BETTER.”

11. *While in a store: “I think _______ is so cute, but I’m not going to spend that much.”

Translation: “This is what I want you to get me for Christmas/birthday/etc.”

12. “I’m almost ready.”

Translation: “It’ll be at least an hour.”

13. “I’m craving chocolate.”

Translation: “If you do as much as breathe too loud over the course of this next week, I’m either going to bite your head off or cry.”

14. “I need a girls night”

Translation: “I’m going to be talking about you…negatively.” Ladies, anything I left out? Comment below.