LOVE WARRIOR NOW AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK!

LOVE WARRIOR NOW AVAILABLE IN PAPERBACK!

First the Pain, Then the Rising

Me: I am different. I finally gave up being a good girl in order to become a free woman.

How? Tell me how to become a free woman.

Me: Okay. Here goes. Here is everything I know about becoming free:

I worked so hard on this speech because I was preparing it for YOU. I sat on the floor and sweated this one out because I wanted to come to you through this computer and with my actual voice, tell you what I’ve learned about pain, power, and freedom.

I have a very pressing issue I have to share with you and I’m not sure how you’re going to feel about it. I’m a first-time school counselor at an elementary/middle school and I’m terrified going into this school year. I want to do right by these kids and their parents, I want to be the best source of support I possibly can and I’m so afraid of letting them down. I’m currently reading Carry On, Warrior and I came across the letter you wrote to your son titled “On Being Brave”. It is everything I want for my kiddos this school year, just to be brave and kind and compassionate. Now, the issue: I have literally plagiarized parts of your letter in my meet-the-teacher letter to their parents, copied exact sentences out of the book and put them in my letter. Oh, and I did not properly cite my source (although I did let them know that it came from Carry On, Warrior in the footer of the letter). My conscience wouldn’t let me send it to my principals and teachers before I asked YOU if this is acceptable, or at least palatable, to you. So, this is me asking if I can use your letter for these families who mean so much to me. Your words and sentiments were so beyond perfect and everything that I wanted them to know going into this school year. You are an inspiration, G, carry on, warrior!

How do you keep going when you constantly fail? When your anxiety is so high it has gone through the roof and when your depression comes and goes in cycles. How do you keep going when you just want the pain to stop? How do you keep going when you have been a constant failure your whole life?

Oh dear god, Lizzie, I know what you mean! You could be describing me. Failing at everything you do, at least through the eyes of the world. Depression, anxiety, social fear. Friends, acquaintances, strangers, tell me that I’m worthless(basically) and that I’ve done nothing with my life. Even I think I’ve done some things, but I get no validation, and indeed, even the insults and scorn from people I know. It makes me feel pretty bad.

You just have to find the strength for yourself. Things won’t always be as bad as they are now. Things can seem really bleak and there’s no hope, but the clouds lift and it’s not so bad. I promise you, you are NOT a failure. The world is a very rough place and it can really knock you down. No one else has walked a mile in your shoes. No one else has DONE what you have done and survived. Probably no one else could. Worldly success is not really success. I KNOW you are not a failure, and so do you, deep down inside. You are not a failure, you are strong. Don’t ever let anyone else make you feel as if you are. I can tell that you are strong just by what you say. Can you maybe use your insurance and talk to a therapist? Or a psychiatrist? Modern medicine can really help! I hope that rays of love and sunshine reach you and lift your spirits up to the sky! You are not a failure, I promise you!

The venom spewing out of these trolls demonstrates the power of hatred and fear. Negative energy is still energy, and these wounded, depleted, empty souls cling to anything that makes them feel a little powerful. They see their homophobic cultural hegemony on the wane, and they rage against the future and progress and hope. The love and optimism Glennon emits is like light, and the darkness HATES the light!

I’ve been reading and watching you from the sidelines of this community and OWN (you and Oprah were my tribe long before I got brace enough to go out and find my own in recovery.)

I don’t know if you will read this, and I may have to write you an actual thank you letter because I want to and feel like you should know how much you’ve impacted my life in the last year.

I’m so thrilled for your new chapter and hope for you and Abby and the kids that this will bring fruit and color and love and fields of daisies to your world for however long it’s meant to be, and you continue to be as bold and raw and beautiful as you have become.

Thanks to you, I am starting to switch gears in my head from becoming a professional mental health counselor or psychiatrist to a writer. I find it to be more human, more impactful perhaps, and certainly more honest. Who knows if it’ll bear fruit, but I’ve found passion where I didn’t know it existed and it all started reading your books and your blog.

I can’t tell you how loved and and treasured you and your writing is in my life and in the hearts and minds of everyone that knows me well. They regularly comment (especially my mother) on how much something you said or wrote reminds them of me, which is compliment of the highest order.

If a thing is free to be good it is also free to be bad. And free will is what has made evil possible. Why, then, did God give them free will? Because free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having. (c) C.S. Lewis

What a sick society we live in that holds a complete narcissist as yourself, a person who is obviously more than a bit mentally ill, on a pedestal. You truly make me sick to my stomach. Invoking the word God often like that covers your ass for being a complete whiney stupid bitch.

Hey Davey – you know this is the internet right? People are allowed to have different views from yours. And if you are trying to lay claim to the word God, maybe you should step away from the needless cruelty of your language. Just a thought…

Yes, Barb, this is the internet; and people are allowed to express views deferent from yours and Glennon’s. Leaving out the profanity, Davey is right about the narcissism. And using God to try to justify what God clearly calls sin is never right. I pray that Glennon (and those of you who agree with her) might go deeper wth this God thing and discover that Jesus’ way–the way of the Cross–is the true way of love; and it involves holiness and not exaltation of self or the flesh. (1 John 2:15-16)

If you don’t agree with her then kindly go elsewhere. Spewing hate for no reason is unhelpful at best. And perhaps do some soul searching as to why you feel so threatened by Glennon. Anger is typically rooted in fear. I pray you are able to face your fear and learn to be kinder to others. In the interim, perhaps it would be best to refrain from making comments online.

That comment was for Davey. Glennon, I so appreciate you sharing from your heart. You are truly a breathe of fresh air for so many of us who have felt so trapped in legalism. Keep on sharing you amazing warrior!!!!

I agree! Thanks Glennon you really touched me with that speach and especially the part about Jesus going into the pain because he’s the ultimate example of that! Our pain is where we grow and those who don’t grow are the ones still running from the pain. There is beauty on the other side!

IF, there is a GOD, I believe God is able to defend God’s self. Talk about being Narcissistic Whiney Davey, invoking the word God and Bitch in same paragraph. Wtf, your parents actually named you Davey, or you use the name to hide. You poor coward.

For all the people here; His sheep hear His voice, and they follow Him. If y’all are not in your kjv bibles, you will not know what God’s will is. Christ said “For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother”.. Christ said, “Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it”. We cannot pick and chose what part of Gods Word we would like to follow and simply discard the rest and expect to be “A ok” with God. God does not teach this anywhere in His Word. Christ never taught this.
As pleasant as sin may be, God hates it. If the Holy Spirit does not convict you of sin, you are either a Christian backsliding, or you are reprobate. If we continue in sin thinking that we are the elect of God and therefore we cannot be lost, you show yourself not to be a child of God. We all need to repent of sin, humble ourselves, acknowledge our transgressions IN LIGHT OF GODS WORD.

One word for you Seth: JESUS. Look at JESUS! Who he was and what he taught. Let go of religion and look at Jesus! Show me how the power of Jesus’ love in your life has transformed you into the hands and feet of his love in this world! This comment you posted? Pure judgment. Love always wins! Jesus was and is Love and calls us to Love too!!

Glennon – you go my sister! So inspired by you! Thank you for all you are doing to be the hands and feet of Jesus’s love in this world today. Thank you for sharing your faith and for calling us all to love! I’m so happy that you’ve found love with Abby! Enjoy the blessings… And thank you for sharing your joy with all of us! Love Warrior was a huge hug from Heaven for me. Thank you for sharing your journey! So inspiring… and refreshing! Keep on Loving!

Yes! Love wins! Leave your husbands, kids and commitment, because Love! It’s old fashion thinking to believe that love is a commitment. We enlightened ones now realize that Love’s only goal is to make ME happy! I show Love by living my bliss! Sure, my kids now belive that it’s ok to hurt others because of Love, but thinking about that ruins my bliss, and therefore Love doesn’t win, and thats sad y’all 🙁

You realize that Glennon went through the worst kind of betrayal in her marriage, right? She did not abandon her commitment, she fought for it, which she deserves a medal for even considering. Your simplistic view is sad. The only one who knows what is best for her kids is her. Never judge someone else’s path! You don’t know what they have been through! Also, there is no shame in living your bliss! EVERYONE matters, including you! And you do your children no favors to silently resign yourself to a life of pain and oppression, if that is what your marriage feels like. They will grow up to relive the same patterns that were modeled for them.

I always wonder when people go around talking about Jesus and His love to justify doing whatever they want.

Christ did indeed call sinners unto Himself. And he told them to be transformed, and then go and sin no more. As the Church we are called to love sinners, but still call them into right relationship with God. Sometimes that means denying oneself.

Jesus also taught it was better to cut off a hand that leads one into sin and enter heaven with one hand than to parade into hell whole.

I wish there was a BIG FAT LOVE BUTTON for your comment!!! ❤️❤️ I keep saying over & over who did Jesus love?? Hello people! He was NOT a white guy who walked around praising leaders & kissing the hands of wealthy! He loved the downtrodden & worst! Wake up!

The holy spirit will convict his children, whether backsliding or in Gods presence daily. Once a person recognizes God as savior, king, and all that He is, they are saved. And once saved, ALWAYS saved. God doesn’t let go because we sin. If He did, Christ died in vain. I don’t believe Christ died without purpose.

Thank you. I would be disingenuous if I didn’t admit that when I visit this blog (It has evolved into more than I can conscientiously embrace), I would find a contrary message of half truths. I just keep hoping that the Voice of Truth will come through in someone’s comment and I’m always hoping for Glennon to see that truth more fully. She is gifted.

Oh, Glennon. Please never stop writing. Your posts, Soul Session talk, and instagrams make my day. Your essay in the Spirituality magazine about listening to yourself for 10 min a day changed a lot about me and convinced me to end an unhappy relationship. Thank you thank you thank you! Congratulations on the wedding as well, I wish you and Abby eternal happiness!

G- I wish you blogged here more. It helps me through some crappy day. I read the comments (ouch) on this before I listened and I was shocked when I heard you talk about life and pain and bravery and courage. The negative comments seemed so focused on your personal life that they completely missed your message. I think your insight and passion is inspiring and all of us can learn something if we sit still and listen a minute. Thanks for fighting the fight. Oh, and I so worship that same Jesus you do.

Glennon,
Thank you for being you. Your message, your bravery, your self, it is all awesome.

One thing comes to my mind as I read these negative comments: Hurt people hurt people. Ironic, isn’t it, given the content of your message is all about pain and these people chose to watch it?

You have done the work and turned your pain into power. These negative comments are examples of people who are letting their hurt become fuel to hurt others. That is so sad. I work with children, and this is the very cycle I fight against daily.

I hope your new sexual orientation – and marriage – work out. Otherwise, it’s going to be a bit awkward, don’t you think? You know…..the whole ‘sanctity of marriage’ and sticking with the person you married through thick and thin, not just until it gets hard. Then your {surprise} conversion…..I don’t know if it’s because you had a change of mentality or because of who you met, but the way you and your people have gone on and on all over social media…..I just really hope this is for real and not just a passing fancy.

*because last year your blog posts were about your husband and how much work you were mutually putting into the relationship and how strong your family was, just to clarify the reason for my opinion/comment

As hateful and damaging as walking away from a relationship for another because of she found a bigger, better deal? Ask her kids what has hurt them more, people who believe in objective truth or mommy ‘living her own truth’.

1) The fact that Glennon is in a homosexual relationship now does not mean that she is trying out a “new sexual orientation.” Sexuality is not black-and-white. Some people find their sexual orientation is fluid and changes over the course of their life. Many have exclusively heterosexual relationships for many years despite actually being bisexual. I don’t feel there is any need to speculate about the exact nature of Glennon’s sexuality; it’s none of our business! She was in love with a man; now she’s in love with a woman. So what?

2) Glennon has never been preachy about the “sanctity of marriage.” Actually, the note her last book ended on was basically “I don’t know if Craig and I will be together forever, but that’s OK.” Long before her separation from Craig, she stated her belief that some loves are “annuals” + some are “perennials,” but that a love that turns out to be an annual is not a failure; it creates more fertile ground for future love.

G- I heart you more than I can say and I’ve watched this multiple times already because holy sh*t.
Never. Never. Never stop saying all of the things! You are sharing the light and the truth.
Also, congratulations on your wedding, it’s so wonderful to see you and Abby together. ‍❤️‍‍

To be God”a girls you must come to Him and represent love on His terms which are full of Grace and Truth. Jesus is the way the truth and the light and no one comes to the Father but by Him… Yhere is a deceptive self seeking love that is not of the true God of the Bible… so much deception of the devil going on here… it grieves me greatly

I don’t know if God has a design so much as a hope, Sad. I think God hopes that we live honest lives of integrity where we learn how to love one another as a daily art and practice. I think God cheers us on in that regard. Love to you, Sad.

I hope we all get lovemaking down to a fine art, ‘Not your business’. It’s such a beautiful way to build a relationship of appreciation and joy with your romantic partner/s. What better way to know your partner than to praise their body intimately. Peace.

As a Christian woman who lives her life to serve God and strives (and fails) every day to be Christ-like…I have to say that your post hurt me deeply. As Christians, we serve a God of love. In fact, John’s gospel says that God is love. We can disagree. We can have different opinions. We can study different books and philosophies. But if we are both Christians, then our goal must always be the same….to strive to be Christ-like. I cannot imagine Jesus ever writing a post like yours. I say this in true Christian love. Focus more on living like Jesus and less on throwing stones. Love is the answer…because God is love.

It’s not what you do that disqualifies you from eternal life in Christ, but what you believe concerning what Jesus has done. Jesus died for your sins is the gospel. When you say homosexuality is not a sin, when it is a sin, you have insulted the spirit of grace, you don’t believe the gospel, and Jesus does not know you.

What a relief, then, that we do not have any real reason to believe there is an omnipresent, invisible being watching and judging everything that we do, tallying up the good and bad to decide who goes to the good place and who goes to the bad place. I think you’re right when you say Jesus doesn’t know Glennon (sorry, Glennon, I admire + respect you but I don’t share your faith), but he doesn’t know you, either. That’s because Jesus died 2000 years ago.

If Glennon’s behavior makes her a hypocrite (and I’m not going to say that b/c I don’t know enough about her faith), I say it’s much better to be that kind of hypocrite than to be a puritanical snob. (And let’s be honest, Christianity makes hypocrites of all its followers.) It seems Glennon has internalized all the best teachings of Christianity and rejected those archaic aspects that stand in the way of true love + joy. I respect that.

Dave, you speak of grace, but I hope you come to know grace intimately. I hope if fills you with a warmth and generosity that is enduring, a warmth and generosity that bigotry can never stain. Bigotry changes its masks all the time- it takes on different crippled personas depending on what is happening in our communities – but grace? Grace is unchanging. It doesn’t grower dimmer in times of darkness when we forget that we belong to one another, when we forget that all forms of love between consenting adults are not only legitimate, but honourable and praiseworthy. It isn’t finicky. It doesn’t say ‘yes’ to this and ‘no’ to that. It is simply the light and breath that animate the soul. I promise you it’s right there with you. I hope you let yourself know it.

Your comments here could easily be MY story of pain unmanaged, dependence then addiction on the stuff they gave me for 10 years, for “relief.” (gotta be some great cosmic irony + teaching in there beyond the obvious addiction one…)

But just reaching out a friendly hand from someone who knows a similar, nearly impossible daily battle; but there is redemption …

I almost don’t believe the words as they appear across the screen. I never thought I’d be able to say that… Clean & Sober from opiate medication for 4 straight months. Wow.
I never felt it remotely possible that I was strong enough –even with God and the universe and the help of every hero figure in history –to expel that addiction’s ugly toxicity from my life.

But I DID (So can you!) and FOR GOOD. Never felt so good to be awake for the brutiful gift/challenge of life.

Our twin life stories (G would make us Triplets!) are such a sweet reminder that your story (and everyone’s here) is also mine, and yours, and Glennon’s, and our fellow humankind’s to hold with us;
that we are ONE humanity, one spiritual energy; and by definition of those terms we all SHARE stories & struggles with apparent strangers and our closest loved ones alike. Why do we insist on suffering solo? We’re not as different as we think, it’s true.

I suffered alone in the hot loneliness, the darkness of addiction, chronic pain, seizures, and undiagnosed ADHD for 9 years or more, (I count the 10th year to mark the beginning of my Recovery.)

BUT Glennon, and Others similar to her in their willingness to open up on difficult topics- such as Brené Brown, Anne Lammott, and many, many more- inspired me: the addicted, hopeless me, from that lifetime ago, in a way that should be called nothing less than a Divine, Life-Saving Intervention From On High.

Glennon – Honestly I did not read this particular post.. but have read several other over the years.. Your faith and bravery inspire me… so that I why I thought I would email/post/whatever this is. BTW – I came all the way to Brooklyn to see from Cincinnati – Alicia Keys amazing.. and I brought my Sister and Niece .. who you inspired a ton.. she was super hesitant to come to your Brooklyn speech because she thought you were stiff Christian.. I think you spoke a Faith language she finally understood.. Thank you!
Anyways, my son.. my beautiful baby boy.. loves God/Jesus/his MawMaw & dresses! He will be 6 in 2 weeks and he wants a princess dress for his bday.. This is cute and awww.. but sooo soo hard as a Mom. I want him to have fun just like his sister in a dress but fear him leaving house in it. If this was my daughter wearing Spiderman or Superman.. she would be so tough.. and way to go for breakign out of feminine stereotypes… However, so is not the case for boys who want to wear dresses and makeup. My husband is so great and has been great but it is starting to wear on him. We went to a counselor and all he said was he is a happy kid – Good we are doing things right! (a counselor for us .. not my boy seeing a counselor) and to love him unconditionally.. well we don’t know how to not mess that up.. he could not tell us if we should or should not by him makeup for christmas or if he can be Shimmer from Shimmer and Shine for Halloween? I think we need to find a new couselor.. he was so nice, but I needed a little more guidance.
I do not mind one bit if my son grows to be a gay Man.. as long as he adopts kids or has a surrogate.. I want grandkids.. and I know as a Mom that this is so natural for my son.. I love God/Jesus.. but I don’t think homosexuality is a sin.. I think is super natural for some folks.. probably even my baby boy. But Gender fluidity and trans is uncomfortable.. there I said it.. … I take my son to get his nails done.. I tell him is beautiful in and out of dresses and I will let him by a Moana wig for his 6th birthday, but sometimes I am uncomfortable and my heart breaks. I know you are busy, but I wanted to share with you.. you are my new Maya Angelou of today. Maya Angelou’s books helped me threw my 20s and your books are helping me threw my 30s almost 40s. You inspire me and I thank God he made you to help all of us! Lesley MOore

Lesley I think you are awesome! I think many of us who are a part of, or allies of, the LGBTQIA family, would still feel odd about challenging society”norms” and let their son wear a dress. But the important part is YOU ARE DOING IT ANYWAY. You don’t press your fears onto him and that is beautiful. I hope he loves his Moana wig!!

It’s simple you tell your kids that dress up play is for home. Didn’t matter girl or boy. My kids knew that if we went to the store or wherever they had to dress appropriately in their proper clothes. Then once we were home they could put back on their princess costume, their spider costume or whatever. They got to play dress up but they also learned there is a time and a place for everything.

Lesley, I love you! You are doing what is right for your child. Just be sure not to presuppose the outcome – lots of kids like to dress up, and who wouldn’t like pink and sparkly better than dull and boring??? But that doesn’t mean he is gay or trans. Of course he might be!!! But don’t put the cart before the horse 🙂

Your words are like a huge breath after an Athsma attack or something (Orrrr…the current political climate.)

You rock. Keep going. People like me and everyone else here cheering you on ARE right outside your door even if you don’t know it.

We need more like you in this world….so, if you raise your son in your likeness (generally speaking of course!), all will be well.. because you will have taught him that character matters, not gendered clothing ; that kindness speaks, not the orientation assigned by culture to one’s vocal range; and so on.

You’re dealing with a confusing gray area for any parent with your child…yet moving through your day with PURE joy and love toward him and to boot, in solidarity with his preferences!

“… I begin to see discord, argument, chaos, perhaps even fear, as a kind of power. I was learning to live in the disquiet I felt in [college], and the mess of my mind. The gnawing discomfort, the chaos, the intellectual vertigo was not an alarm. It was a beacon. It begin to strike me that the point of my education was a kind of discomfort…” i just read this in Ta-Nehisi Coates, between the world and me. thank you glennon your speech was so powerful!!

I tell my students all the time, “The only way out it through.” I first heard this from Michael Brown author of The Presence Process, last year. It would have benefitted me to learn this much earlier in life — and that is why I include my students (and my own daughter) in on this gem of knowledge! Thanks for spreading the word in such an inspiring way. AWESOMENESS! 🙂

G … Thank you, thank you, thank you. You speak to my soul and though it’s hard to hear we need to avoid the easy button, it’s the truth. Thank you for the reminder to stop running. I think I’m off to do the opposite of radiating sunlight now… 😉

Keep preaching Glennon. I know the audience didn’t receive your call to listen to the women of color who have led the fight. But keep speaking, anyway. That is a hard thing for them to hear. But they will sit with the hot loneliness of those words and maybe, they won’t run from it.

Here I am on my phone trying to escape that hot loneliness and I found YOU! And you told me to STOP, in a way that totally inspires me. Wow. Thank you. I am beyond overwhelmed, thinking about sitting with all of this, but I’m going to try for that .6 seconds of improvement because I want to believe that I’m a warrior too. Thank you.

Hi,
First of all I wanna says ” I like your video adding idea”. Most person can’t read the content, but everyone sees the video. I really enjoy it and I like it. Very amazing video. Thanks for this great blog.

Is there a way to save this video? I’m going to need to watch it about a million more times. And I’m going to want my daughters to watch it when they’re ready (ages 2 and 5). That was so profound. So many nuggets I need to put on post it notes all over my house! Thank you!

Monique, if you click on the arrow in the upper right corner of the video, it allows you to share on social media or you can bookmark the actual webpage. I have a Youtube acct and saved it for later. Hth!!!

I appreciate this so much. I had to do three full months of therapy, almost every single week day, to cope with the grief of the end of a relationship as well as the diagnosis of a chronic illness. At the beginning, I didn’t cry. I was “fine”. I was just going through the motions. Taking notes. Feeling like I was healing like a total boss. But I was just numb and I didn’t realize until one day I couldn’t stop crying, and then I cried for weeks. It was so uncomfortable – I used to apologize over and over for crying, and I wanted to go to a hotel room and cry until I couldn’t anymore. I was afraid that it was unhealthy to be around me. I felt like I had to hide myself. But my therapist refused to let me hide, and she taught me how to turn into the pain and embrace all of the hurt and the anger. Sometimes I would sob and say, out loud, why I was crying because it needed a name and it needed to be acknowledged. I had never been in so much pain in my life and it was terrifying. But I had to wrap my arms around it, and myself. That was the only way I was going to heal.