In reading Bob Goff’s “Love Does” to our children recently, I was reminded of his words urging us not to be “Stalkers” of Jesus. He points out that we often spend so much time personally, and even in our gatherings studying about Jesus/Holy Spirit/God. But how often are we focused on simply “being with” this Triune God? As a pastor, as a father, and especially as one who recognizes the power of God’s Love – I want to consciously spend time, and invite others into times, of being increasingly aware of the fullness of God’s Love & presence.

Recently there was a book published that contains an amazing amount of scientists, researchers, and history of people all wanting to do something similar. The main title is “How to Change Your Mind”, and a conversation with the author on NPR caught my attention. As someone who’s studied biblical Greek, I remembered that Jesus often called people to “repent” using the word “metanoia” which literally means “having a changed mind”. The unpopularity of this book in Christian circles might be caused by its subtitle, “What the New Science of Psychedelics Teaches Us About Consciousness, Dying, Addiction, Depression, and Transcendence”. The awkwardness of my preconceptions of psychedelics pushed-aside, I went ahead and read it anyways.

Wow. The history of these substances and the opportunities for research beginning to resurface has a great deal to offer the brokenness of humanity. Researchers are just in the past 8 years, finally and slowly/clinically, beginning to proceed cautiously again. There are potentials in treating addictions, anxiety/depression, PTSD, and a great many of maladies in between. Unfortunately, many of these substances were misused/abused in unsafe ways/levels back around the ’60s, and so most of us have a cloudy understanding of all these things.

But most interesting to me were the accounts of the early scientists/philosophers/divinity students who experienced these substances simply as a way to experience an “altered state of consciousness”. Complete skeptics who viewed everything through a scientific lens came away skeptical of their own need to understand only that which is understandable. Religious people came away feeling as if they’d “finally” had an experience of the divine. There were so many great connections to those of us who are willing to see it, and I cannot process everything or share all the great quotes here. But one thing in particular screams to be noticed:

“What is striking about this whole line of clinical research is the premise that it is not the pharmacological effect of the drug itself but the kind of mental experience it occasions – involving the temporary dissolution of one’s ego – that may be the key to changing one’s mind.” Michael Pollan, How to Change Your Mind

It doesn’t take a Bible scholar to see the connection here. Pick a verse! Look at Ephesians 4:22-24 if you need one. Scripture talks about “dying to self” in order to come alive with the New Life of Jesus Christ over and over again. Followers of Jesus since ancient times have wrestled with and expanded on what all of this involves.

What happens in story after story throughout Pollan’s book (the “good” trips at least) are individuals who carve out time and space purposefully for an “otherly” experience. They are talked to by a “guide” who comforts them, and reassures them of their presence. They close their eyes, turn on some music, and are guided verbally while the substance takes its effect. Once you shed some of the hallucinatory aspects, what often leads to transformation/healing in the individual is coming away from such an experience aware that an “other” way of existing is out there. An immediate realization of a unity that flows through all of creation, and the beauty of color, sound, etc.

“One of the things that commends travel, art, nature, work, and certain drugs to us is the way these experiences, at their best, block every mental path forward and back, immersing us in the flow of a present that is literally wonderful – wonder being the by-product of precisely the kind of unencumbered first sight…” Michael Pollan, How to Change Your Mind

This is not too far off from experiences we’ve heard of happening in worship. This is not too removed from experiences of “guided prayer” even I have helped lead others into/out from. It reminded me of another book I’d read recently, “Merton’s Palace of Nowhere“. Merton has written extensively on prayer, on dying to the “false self”, and on meditation. He was even around during many of these early “trials” in the 60’s, so I wondered his perspective of these things. In a letter from December 1965, he writes:

“..my impression is that they are probably not all they are cracked up to be. Theologically I suspect that the trouble with psychedelics is that we want to have interior experiences entirely on our own terms. This introduces an element of constraint and makes the freedom of pure grace impossible. Hence, religiously, I would say their value was pretty low. However, regarded merely psychologically, I am sure they have considerable interest.” Thomas Merton, The Hidden Ground of Love

I find myself agreeing with Merton. The grace of God that arrives in our moments/lives of sacrifice and other-centered Love is not something we can carefully plan for/measure. They should not be contained in a moment or require the assistance of substances. Even the neuro-chemical responses of emotional worship experiences can be addictive in ways that make us desire more of those moments on terms we can manufacture.

“Only when we are able to ‘let go’ of everything within us, all desire to see, to know, to taste, and to experience the presence of God, do we truly become able to experience that presence with the overwhelming conviction and reality that revolutionize our entire inner life.” James Finley, Merton’s Palace of Nowhere

It’s not as simple as saying “Drugs are bad, mmkay?” But it is as simple as saying an authentic and sustainable experience of God that transforms and brings New Life is possible for anyone, anywhere, at any time. We live within a creation that proclaims the awe-inducing beauty and goodness of God,. We are surrounded by a fellow humanity that was created to bear the image of the Divine. God is not so far away as we often imagine. The divine invitation to repent, to “metanoia” (have a changed mind) is something we do not seek to control, but submit ourselves to by pausing. We offer ourselves in unceasing and moments of prayer, and a life with patterns of Sabbath.

To put it another way, we “come away/apart” or “retreat” to a solitary place as Jesus did, but also in moments joined together in relationship with others. We prayerfully and vulnerably confess our false selves and seek to live in ways that shed/deny that self for the sake of others. In living with these patterns, embracing people and moments with the precious validity of what could be (rather than what we assume will be), we position ourselves to receive the grace of a God-given Now.

On a closing note, I do believe these substances are able to “force individuals” into an awareness of the Divine (though not always). However, we don’t need a substance in order to reveal to us different ways of perceiving this world exist. What Jesus invites us to recognize is the power of compassion to accomplish even more. Compassion means literally “to suffer with”. When I choose to enter into the sufferings of another (person, people group, etc.), my vantage point enters into their own. When this happens, we experience a “metanoia” that empowered by the Holy Spirit can lead to freedom from the chains we’d previously been bound by. From a Christian perspective – when I “die to self” to come alive as Christ, I enter into a Holy Spirit-sourced compassionate life for those whom Jesus Loves (everyone…yes, even/especially them). Such a life is the arrival of New Creation, where former things (false self) have passed away and all things have become New. Not once, and not in a moment, but as a way of Life.

But beware. As anyone who’s traveled to a foreign country can affirm, a daily existence where everything is “New” can be incredibly exhausting both cognitively and physically. We may find ourselves depending on the power of God and needing to return to His presence…often…

One year ago I was on my way to the D6 Conference in Texas, along with our new lead pastor and another pastor friend we picked up along the way. I was attending the conference both as a “Pastor of Family Life”, but also as an intensive study course personally administered by the president of Wesley Seminary toward completion of my MDiv. It was a great week of learning, dreaming and praying over what God had in store for a church family I loved with a new pastor I was blessed to also call a friend. I ended up being able to share a spoken word I’d written as part of my coursework with the entire D6 Conference! As we went home from that week – we had no idea what would happen in the year ahead. We certainly didn’t imagine the year we’ve had. 🙂

This year we’re traveling to the D6 Conference in North Carolina, along with our spouses. The four of us look forward to some great time praying and casting vision over what God has in store for this church family that we love – and we’re blessed to all do so as friends. But my wife and I are also attending as a couple on the edge of launching into full-time missionary work in Gyor, Hungary! We’re scanning the topics, and trying to figure out what seminars/speakers might equip us for the work on the horizon as well as the work we’re aiming to finish well.

This past year I’ve finished my MDiv, something I never thought was part of my life plan. It seems when you hand God your life and ask Him one step at a time “What would please you here?” – He actually seems to suggest things you may not have imagined. Not in an anxious “Oh my goodness, I’d better not miss out on any tiny decision that God may have an opinion on….” But more in a mode of living toward receiving and responding to the flowing Love of God out into and for the sake of His Kingdom announced and arriving in the world through changed lives, people set free and restored relationship.

All this to say, the past year has brought some changes for sure. The year ahead seems to be filled with quite a bit as well. We’re going to be selling our home soon, and moving into a short-term rental. Then we’ll move to Hungary, and learn a new language both literally and figuratively as we learn to join the living Word in a new context. Thankfully, we’ve been shaped for years already by the Word who became flesh. So #D62018, 2019, and beyond…here we come…

In 1965, the Jamaican Methodist church was seeking a year of renewal. Sir Hugh Braham Sherlock, a Methodist leader also known at the time for writing the Jamaican national anthem “Jamaica, Land We Love”, helped pen this incredible poem & hymn as a prayer for God’s people to sing in unison…

I’ve been reading The Attention Merchants for fun between classes, & as everyone is posting “New Years’ Thoughts/Resolutions”, I thought this was an important time to share the surprising insight from the author…

“If we think of attention as a resource or even a kind of currency, we must allow that it is always, necessarily, being ‘spent’. There is no saving it for later.” (pg.20)

“(speaking of developments in political advertising) With its combination of moral injunctions as well as daily and weekly rituals, organized religion had long taken human attention as its essential substrate. This is especially true of monotheisms, whose demands for a strict adherence to the one true God naturally promote an ideal of undivided attention. Among early Christians, for example, total attention to God implied ceaseless prayer. The early Church father Clement of Alexandria wrote of the “Perfect Christian” as one who “prays throughout his entire life, endeavoring by prayer to have fellowship with God.” Likewise the desert monastics of the fourth century took as their aim “to maintain there as near as possible a ceaseless vigil of prayer, punctuated only by the minimal interruption for food and sleep.”

“Such an aspiration to monopolize the attention of believers was hardly abandoned after Christianity’s early days. Some 1700 years later, John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, prescribed various means for keeping the mind attuned to God, such as the practice of thinking of him immediately upon waking, right before falling asleep, for at least an hour during the day, and before taking any important action. (This discipline shares some similarity with the Jewish practice of offering brachot, or blessings, at various routine moments, such as before eating or drinking, or more exceptional ones, as when thunder is heard, among other practices codified in the Mishnah in the third century CE.)”

“To be sure, it isn’t as if before the twentieth century everyone was walking around thinking of God all the time. Nevertheless, the Church was the one institution whose mission depended on galvanizing attention; and through its daily and weekly offices, as well as its sometimes central role in education, that is exactly what it managed to do. At the dawn of the attention industries, then, religion was still, in a very real sense, the incumbent operation, the only large-scale human endeavor designed to capture attention and use it. But over the twentieth century, organized religion, which had weathered the doubts raised by the Enlightenment, would prove vulnerable to other claims on and uses for attention. Despite the promise of eternal life, faith in the West declined and has continued to do so, never faster than in the twenty-first century. Offering new consolations and strange gods of their own, the commercial rivals for human attention must surely figure into this decline. Attention, after all, is ultimately a zero-sum game.” (Pgs.26-27, The Attention Merchants, Tim Wu)

Translation? The things we purchase, and technology/apps we use may be affordable or even free, but there is always a cost involved. When that cost involves our attention during moments previously available to contemplation, quiet, prayer, & offering ourselves to discover the needs/desires/joys/pains of God & others – we may benefit from asking if we can/should really afford the price.

Question for conversation: Is it more redemptive to abstain from creating/posting content – helping spread subversive critique on consumption of social media, or to sparingly & creatively post content that points those who consume toward the Love and Truths of God? How have you seen either – done well?

In any case – may we be people who invite our children & young people to think about these things. May this be a year where we realize there are always prices unlisted. May we seek redemptive ways to interact, create, and live together. May we not be defined purely as amused consumers, or anxious responders, but discover new ways to offer Faith, Hope & Love creatively as New Creations ourselves…

A few weeks ago, my wife sent me a picture our daughter had drawn. A stick figure that seems wrapped in a straight jacket, that my wife (because she rocks, naturally) asked our daughter to tell her more about.

Let me pause for a moment to remind the reader: We’ve had our daughter home from the DR Congo for a bit over a year now. She’s learned a lot, and grown in so many ways. One of the sources of her growth has been involvement in church activities and lessons. A focus of our children’s’ ministry here at Moundford Free Methodist Church last year was to teach the kids about faithful followers of Jesus. People who suffered for the cause of spreading the good news of the Love of Jesus – even when there were sometimes large prices to pay.

So when our daughter explained the picture to mommy, she shared “It’s daddy, and the mean people tied him up.” My wife asked why, and she said “Because he was telling people about Jesus.”

It may have just been a silly moment of imagination. But it may have actually been something in the back of her mind/heart for months now – wondering if and when daddy might actually be taken away or hurt because of how he spends his time telling others about the Love of Jesus. We’ve assured her, thankfully, daddy doesn’t have to worry about this. My job is safe (although maybe it should seem more threatening to the powers that be at times?) to do.

It made me incredibly thankful, when I allowed it to settle. Hanging from my door lately is a leather cross made by Coptic Christians in Egypt, given to me by a friend back in college. It reminds me each day as I walk into my office – how thankful I can be to have a place where my life and work is not threatened each day simply because of Jesus. It causes me to pause and pray for those for whom “safety” means something so far away and unknown.

I’m thankful my daughter (now) doesn’t have to worry about daddy being hurt or killed by “the mean people” who don’t know about the Love of God. But there are children globally who aren’t free from that worry. May we lift up our brothers and sisters in prayer even now, and live lives that strive to not take for granted the freedom we have to proclaim the love & peace of Jesus in the unique ways we’re given…

Coughing as I breathe in, chest wheezing, this dusty cloud kicks up when I walk.

When I talk, words fall to the ground without sound.

Cracks invading the pavement, waiting for someone tall to step wrong and fall. Someone saw rain in the distance, just one instance, but that was years ago.

For now, nothing grows. And so, nothing sows. The last leaves turned to ash. Our of resource, out of cash. It happened so fast, before we realized we were empty. The wind blows over another dried up, used to be, has been but isn’t now.

For a split second, seems to bow on purpose, then falls.

Smashing into a million pieces in these parched halls. The air so dry it’s impossible to sweat – impossible to shed a tear, for fear of losing the last drops of moisture we assume are somewhere deep inside. We’ve tried to hide. We’ve lied to hide. Cause when it’s gone, it’s gone.

Or so we’ve heard. Not another word. After all, we’ll get by. We just need to try. Try harder. To really mean it this time.

The room is shaking, the ground quaking, the clouds fill the sky and darken brightly.

Not a drip. Not a trickle or a stream. But all in one moment it happens.

Dams break, waves overtake, water makes and snakes its’ way, soaking the day, washing away any traces of ash and dust. Respond we must, gasping for air and at the same time sinking without a care.

The pipes have burst, rushing like floods from somewhere unseen. More like a geyser, like the spring from which all springs are sprung – filling our lungs and drowning out all remnants of thirst.

To a land that was cursed – healing and life, New Life. A Spirit poured out, and all creation shouts “Great is the Lamb that was slain!” “Great is His Name!” The Spirit that came, as God promised it would.