64-year-old Janice Robbins of Conway, Arkansas did the unthinkable. Not only did she commit suicide by burning herself to death, but she took her 7-year old granddaughter Abby with her. Janice had stabbed Abby in the chest before setting fire to the house, which resulted in them both losing their lives. The county coroner has reported that both Abby and Janice were alive when the fire was started and both died of smoke inhalation. I’ll give you a second to process all that. Yes, Abby had a stab wound to the chest and was likely in a world of pain, and then it was the smoke inhalation that eventually killed her.

Janice had adopted Abby after her son, Army Staff Sgt. William T. “Terry” Robbins, died in Iraq because he was shot by another solider in an argument over alcohol in 2005. Janice had also lost a younger son, years prior. He was a teenager and from what I’ve found, he committed suicide. Sources have also said that Janice had a 3rd son that she had no contact with because his wife didn’t allow it. So I’m sure that after losing Abby’s dad in Iraq, Janice felt all alone and extremely depressed.

I won’t pretend for a second that I know what it feels like to lose a child, never mind 2 children. I won’t pretend that I understand PTSD or feeling so helpless and depressed that taking your own life seems like the only viable option. Regardless of ALL of that, it is not okay in any shape, form, or fashion to murder your granddaughter and take her with you because you think that is what is best for her. The suicide note that was found included this; ‘Can’t stand to see Abby left behind’ and ‘pray for my soul’.

Authorities are reported saying that this was no spur of the moment decision on Janice’s part. In her truck, the discovered the suicide note, Abby’s birth certificate, Janice’s will, and other important documentation. This was pre-convinced, and well thought out. So, in my humble opinion, Janice had the time to seek help if she needed it. Why not turn to a professional? Why not surround yourself with people that love you and could help bring you back up? Why not drop Abby off with another family member and then just kill yourself? So many “what if’s” and not enough answers. Abby paid the ultimate price for Janice’s selfish decision with her life. A life that had not even begun to begin.

Neighbors, friends, and family members have said that Janice was a doting grandmother, completely wonderful and amazing in every way. That when Abby ‘s adoption finally came through that she was over the moon. That little Abby switched to calling her momma after that. Abby was described as a “smart, happy, articulate” little girl.

Only thing I can find about her bio-mother is that she lives out of state and they can’t find her yet. That gets a big fat WTF from me… but hoping to find more on her the more I read up or when more reports come out.