Food

Customers would ask me “What’s our secret sauce Conor?”“How can you make our business stand out from all the others out there?” I would evade the questions, preferring to maintain the curtain of mystique around what I do, like the Wizard of Oz pulling on the levers of deception and subterfuge as I wrestled with the brand image of various entities. Ultimately, we would define the brand and expose the “secret sauce” that really made the difference for the company in question. However, this is not marketing and the sauce I want to mention is less of a secret than it used to be.

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This little delight might just as well be titled “Mantis Prawn V Monkfish – The battle of the uglies.” In truth, I had intended doing Mantis Prawns and Black Beans”. Never having cooked the crusty, ugly little crustaceans before, I didn’t reckon on them being so difficult to cook. The cooking bit is pretty easy (boil the blighters). But, getting the meat out of the shells proved to be impossible.

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Tension
It’s a biting cold winter afternoon. I’m parked up in the car park of a West Dublin pub. She is late. The deal may not go down the way I had hoped. My mind is racing. “Is that the Garda (Irish police) in the blue

“I can’t believe he said that!” But, I did. I said it and I intended to. I know you are a sensitive soul and are easily offended. But, I just had to say it. I said it so you would recognise yourself and say “Yes, perhaps I am a ‘lazy B’. That’s why I don’t cook any of Conor’s lovely recipes. I like to look at the nice pictures and imagine how the food must taste. That’s satisfaction enough for me.” If you do, then this is a dish for you. I’ve even named it for you “Lazy Bastards’ Ginger Chicken“. It is simplicity itself to prepare and is a total delight. Who knows, it might make a cook out of you too.

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I’ve been writing this blog for a few years now. Like all endeavours, it has it’s ups and downs. There are weeks when I am overflowing with ideas for stories and recipes. There are the fallow periods when I haven’t either a recipe or story idea that makes any sense. I have been through a thin patch recently and was beginning to think that perhaps I should park the endeavour for a while (That’s a euphemism for give it up entirely). Then, along came a thought; “What about a Thai style Beef Stew?”. Without thinking about it, I was thinking about it. I rummaged in the press and the fridge. Yes! lime leaves, coconut milk, lemongrass, chilli, ginger, garlic, potatoes and palm sugar. I just needed the beef and the spinach. Then I got to thinking about my motivation. Why do I write this blog? Why do I take the photos, process and publish them? Why do I devise and cook these recipes?

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As I write this, it’s a cold January day in Dublin. Not the time to be thinking of the barbecue (or of salads). We need to hunker down for a few more months of stews, curries and roasts. However, I have a broader vision than most. I know that while we are suffering in the gloom of short, dark days here in Ireland, my friends in Australia and New Zealand are enjoying a warm (too warm, I hear), long summer. So, while we may be suffering a gloomfest, the guys and gals on the bottom half of the world need this simple, tasty recipe for Lamb Burgers with Cumin.

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Meatballs – they are not the most challenging thing to produce. Start with great meat, add some decent aromatics and be sure to serve them in a tasty sauce. If you do that, everything is bound to turn out fine. Fine, that is, if you don’t ask your daughter to choose between Thai and Italian. I made that mistake and she punished me for it. When I mooted the meatballs idea, she immediately said “Mmmmmmm, in a nice tomato sauce”. As I have already posted Italian style meatballs, my suggestion that I needed something new for the blog didn’t go down well. But she didn’t leave it there.

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You can see it now. The backdrop is the inside an old red-brick building housing a gleaming modern copper still. The guy, wearing skinny jeans and an old check shirt, is mid 30s with a beard of which Grizzly Adams would be proud. He is holding a glass up to the light, as if he is inspecting a rare diamond for clarity. He’s not, he’s looking at one of the easiest to produce spirits, gin.

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If I called this “The best chicken casserole recipe in the world, ever”, I might get a bit of pushback from some purists who would tell me they have a superior list of ingredients. “What about lardons?” may be a valid question too. “Goodness, no white wine?” would be in the mix also. Some people may have views on my method too. However, I didn’t call it “the best chicken casserole recipe in the world, ever”. No, this is better than that. It’s Chicken Casserole Like Mum Used to Make and it really can’t be improved upon.

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Many, many years ago, my great aunt Anna passed away. She was on my mother’s side of the family and a pretty fantastic woman by all accounts. She left to my mother, (amongst other things), a fine bone china tea service. Despite my being only a callow youth at the time, I well remember the beautiful translucent cups and delicate plates. The story went that the only person to whom tea and cakes had been served on that set was the Archbishop of Armagh. Back in the day, he was a man of great influence in Irish society. Having such a service was a rare thing. We really didn’t appreciate it. It spent most of it’s life in our house gathering dust on a basement shelf. I tell you this because there needs to be a good reason for any Irish person to get the good plates out. This easy to cook oriental delight is a great reason. So, with distant memories of Great Aunt Anna’s tea service, I present you with Sticky Oriental Pork Squares.

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A bit about me

When I am not working, I like to cook for my family and friends. Since starting this blog, I have won the Best Newcomer in the Blog Awards Ireland in 2012, and Best Food and Drink Blog in the Blog Awards Ireland 2013, Best Food and Drink Blog the Blog Awards Ireland 2014 and Best Overall Blog 2014, Finalist in Blog Awards Ireland 2015, been featured on Freshly Pressed in 2015 and won Best Food Blog in the 2016 Blog Awards Ireland, so I must be doing something right.
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