It’s the Live-Action G.I. Joe’s Destroooh Nooooo

IESB got this exclusive pic of Destro from the upcoming live-action G.I. Joe movie, just as one might exclusively get herpes from an untrustworthy sexual partner. Now, I’m well aware of the fact that this Destro will (SPOILER ALERT) put the silver mask on at some point in the film, and/or get it permanently stuck on his noggin. But that does not make me any happier; how hard would it be to just have him wearing the goddamn mask from frame 1? Why not do that, if only to please the fans? Why bother with a face-mask-origin-story (which sounds a hell of a lot like Dr. Doom’s origin) anyway? Oh G.I. Joe movie, you will never please me.

About The Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.