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Topic: The Lone Ranger and Tonto (Read 1087 times)

After a hard hot aggrevating ride all morning the Lone Ranger decides that he's gonna stop by the Saloon in town and have a cold one. He tells Tonto to stay outside with the horses. After a couple of hours in the unmerciful sun Tonto walks in to talk to the Lone Ranger. Kingasubie, Silver get much hot in sun. The Lone Ranger, a little aggitated, tells him to go outside and run circles around him createing a breeze. Tonto does as he's told.

A couple of hours passes by and a cowboy walks in and says to the Lone Ranger he has something to tell him. Now the Lone Ranger raises his voice and says "You gonna tell me MY HORSE IS GETTING HOT TOO?!" The cowboy sez "Nawsur". WHAT THEN DO YOU WANT TO TELL ME?!Well sur, I jes wanted to tell you, you left your injun running.

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are camping in the desert. They set up their tent and are asleep. Some hours later, The Lone Ranger wakes his faithful friend. "Tonto, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Tonto replies, "Me see millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" asks The Lone Ranger. Tonto ponders for a minute.

"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

What it tell you, Kemo Sabi?" The Lone Ranger is silent for a moment, then speaks: "Tonto, you dummy, someone has stolen our tent."

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are watching a horde of Indian braves bear down on them in full battle fury. "Looks like we're in trouble, Tonto," says the Lone Ranger to his pal. "What you mean 'we,' white man?," Tonto responds.