Thursday, November 27, 2008

Most of us have always looked at hope as a good thing. We hope for a better world, a better relationship, a new TV, a new car, a partner, better behaved kids. The list is endless when it comes to what we hope for.

But hope is of the future. It takes us out of the present moment and puts us into the place of wanting something better. Hope is saying, "This moment isn’t good enough. I need something more to make me happy, loved, peaceful, content."

We spend a lot of our lives living in either the past, reliving our experiences or in the future, hoping for better ones. When we live this way, we are not being present in this moment to enjoy all that it has to offer.

Take a look at this moment. Is there anything wrong in this moment? Most likely you will find nothing wrong. The suffering comes from taking ourselves out of this moment and putting ourselves into the past or future.

When we hope, we are looking for something outside of ourselves to make us feel better. "I hope I get that new job. I can make more money." "I hope my husband doesn’t come home drunk so we can have a nice evening." "I hope my children do well in school so I can be proud of them."

Looking at what is behind the hope is a good way to be aware of what we feel we are lacking within ourselves, that causes us to move out of the present moment and into the future.

The future holds a great promise, but when we get that new job or our children do well in school, does it really make us happier within? Does it last?

This moment is as good as it gets. If we are not happy in this moment, it is a good time to look inside and change the belief that is telling us our happiness lies in the hope of something in the future.

Being aware of the need behind the hope can help us to connect with the belief that is fueling our desire for something that looks better in the future.

When we remain in the moment, we have no need for anything outside of what we are feeling within ourselves. We can connect to the happiness, love, peace, contentment and joy of living in the present moment.

This week, take a look at any time you find yourself hoping for something better. "I hope this day doesn’t drag on." "I hope I’m not late for work this morning." "I hope that I can pay the bills this month." Look at any time you are wishing for things that you feel might make your life better. And when you do recognize this, bring yourself back into the present moment and ask yourself, "Is there anything wrong in this moment?"

Have a beautiful, happy and joyful week living in the present moment where all dreams, hopes and desires already exist.

If you are interested in our weekly Spiritual Group Meetings or private one-on-one sessions please visit my website at www.bettinagoodwin.com

Thursday, November 20, 2008

We begin at a very young age to look into the world for what we need. But the world does not provide us with our love, peace and happiness. It can be a reflection of the love, peace and happiness. It can also be a reflection of our pain.

As babies we learn that our parents are there to provide us with what is required. We cry and we are fed or changed or picked up. This is a lesson that we carry into all aspects of our lives – to look outside ourselves for what we need.

We start to look for our love, happiness, peace in the world around us. This is how our parents did it and this is what we learn from them. And so we follow in their footsteps, looking for the things that will make us happy "out there".

And when we don't get what we want from the world outside us, we try to change the world so that we can get what we want and need. Eventually we see that this person or this house or this car is not giving us the happiness that we want. So we get another person, house or car. We want our parents, partner or children to love or approve of us and when they don't we try harder to gain the love and approval. And on and on it goes until we realize that there must be a better way.

This better way is to look within ourselves and know the love and peace that is already in us and always has been. We've just never had anyone to teach us this.

What we don't always realize is that all the love, happiness and peace we need or want is right here inside us all the time. Why can’t we feel it? Because we are constantly looking elsewhere for it. And when we don’t get it in the way we expect, it brings us feelings of anger, disappointment, hurt and fear. From this we take on beliefs like "I'm not good enough", "I'm not lovable", "I need approval", "I am not worthy".

Beliefs such as these are the blocks that keep us from feeling the love inside ourselves. If we believe we are not worthy of being loved, how can we feel our own love?

If we are not feeling loved by another person, that is the time to look within and see if we are feeling the love inside. If we are looking for someone else's respect or approval, we must look within and see if we are respecting and approving of ourselves. Whatever we are looking for outside of ourselves is a good indication of what we need to look for within. It isn't another person's responsibility to make us feel loved or respected. That is our responsibility. And by looking at the beliefs that fuel these feelings of lack, we can shift them and begin to feel it within ourselves.

We cannot change the world to what we think it should be so that we can be happy. We can change our own beliefs and recognize the love, happiness and peace that lies within us. We can live our lives from this place of peace and as we shift within ourselves we will see the world shift with us. This is where true peace will come from on a global level.

This week, take a look at any time when you might be looking to someone or something else to provide you with love, respect or happiness. And as you become aware of it, look within yourself and recognize where you might not be loving, respecting or feeling happy in you. Connect the feelings to the belief and see how the belief is untrue. Shift the belief and feel the peace and love within as you let go of the need for others to give you what you already have.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

There are many ways in our lives in which we go to resistance. We resist what is happening if we don't like it or think that something else will make us happier. We resist the emotions or thoughts that are coming up for us that we don't want to look at. We resist the way others treat us and want to control them so that we will be happy.

Resistance is usually connected to a belief we have that needs to be looked at. If we are feeling resistance to something then it means that the belief that is connected to it is not working for us. Are we happy? Will resisting what is happening make us happy? Probably not.

If we are in a place of resistance, then we are not accepting all that is. If we are not in a state of acceptance, we are resisting and as a result we are suffering. Resistance and suffering work together to create a world of pain for ourselves. But when we let go of the resistance and allow what is happening to be whatever it is we can feel the peace of acceptance.

Acceptance brings the peace we desire. Resistance brings suffering. Which do we want in our lives? Which feels better?

Resisting what is occurring doesn't change it. Wanting to change or control it doesn't change things either.

Perhaps someone has cut you off in traffic and you feel angry and say, "he should not have done that!" It doesn’t change the fact that the person did it. What it does is keep us in a place of pain. We can look at the pain, in this case in the form of anger, that comes up for us and use the experience as a lesson rather than resist what happened. And as we allow ourselves to look at the thought or feeling that doesn't feel good to us, can let go of the need to resist or control and be accepting of what has happened and grateful for the lesson it may have brought to us.

If we resist looking at our thoughts or feelings, which is really all resistance is in most situations, we are keeping ourselves in suffering. We can let go of the suffering once we allow the emotions to be felt, see that the thought is not the truth and know from the place deep within that any belief connected to this pain is also false.

At first it may be difficult to be aware of our resistance. We can look back at previous experiences and see the resistance and how we could have shifted it. But as we become more aware, with practice we can recognize our resistance in the moment that it is happening and change how we think and feel as it is happening.

As you go through your week, be aware of the situations in which you feel you are experiencing resistance. Allow yourself to be aware of the thoughts and feelings that you are having and what the belief is that is connected to them. See if you can shift from resistance to acceptance and notice the change in how you think and feel.

Have a wonderful week of acceptance of all that is and the peace that comes with it.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Knowing and thinking are two very different things. Thinking is the ego mind constantly chattering away at us about our past or our future. Thinking is what creates the stories that keep us in our pain and suffering. It takes us to the past to relive experiences over and over again and uses the past to justify what is happening right now that is painful. It takes us to the future when we are unhappy and looking for something outside of ourselves to make us happy. Our heads are filled with a continuous stream of thoughts about what we should and shouldn't do.

Knowing is the quiet, still place within us that recognizes the truth. It is the place from which our wisdom speaks. It always comes from the present moment and keeps us connected to the awareness of who we are.

The first feeling we have in any situation comes from our knowing. It is the one true intelligence that exists within us. However, we don’t always hear this inner truth. Usually because there is a louder more insistent noise happening in our heads that can easily talk us right out of listening to the knowingness inside us.

We can listen to the noise of our thoughts and stay in a place of pain or even create more pain, or we can drop into the place within that is the awareness where peace lies and hear the voice of truth, our knowingness.

How do we turn off the "voices in our heads"? The thing is, we don’t really have to turn off the thoughts, destroy them or control them. They are free to run through our heads as much as they want. But we can choose to ignore them and go beyond the noise to what we know is the truth in us.

When we have an experience of someone yelling and screaming at us, we can be pulled into the angry words and react to them in an angry way or we can watch and observe from a centred, loving place, as the other person displays their anger, knowing that it doesn’t affect us.

This person is a reflection of our own thoughts. Being triggered by the angry person shows us that we are listening to the thoughts that tell us what we want to hear. The mind will look at the past to confirm that the thoughts are true. And we will believe it. That is because the thoughts are taking us to our past pain.

Even positive thoughts come from the ego mind. We are told that a positive attitude and positive thinking will help us to be happier, manifest what we want. But if we do not have a positive BELIEF system, we won’t be able to manifest anything but more pain.

How do we learn to recognize the difference between our thoughts and the knowingness? Have you ever had that niggling inside when you say something or do something? It's that little feeling inside that something just isn't right? It feels uncomfortable and sometimes we can even have physical reactions to it – a knot in the stomach, tightness in the chest or a lump in the throat. These are all signs that we are not acting from that knowing place within.

When we do or say something from the knowing place, we feel the peace at all times. We don’t doubt that what we’ve done is right. We KNOW. Everything we need to know comes from this place.

Knowing takes no thought. In fact knowing and thinking are not connected at all. When we say, "I should have gone with my first instinct," that instinct comes from the knowing. The ego mind will try to convince us that it is wrong, but with awareness and presence we can learn how to listen to the inner voice of knowing.

As you go through the week, take a look at situations where your thoughts might be trying to get your attention and convince you of something that isn’t true. As you become aware of it, breathe and bring yourself into the present and feel the peaceful, loving space of knowing.

Have a wonderful week of living from that knowingness that is the truth of who we are.

The Soul Connection Radio Show

About Bettina

I am a Spiritual Counselor, Reiki Master, teacher, speaker, workshop facilitator, writer and because life can never be too sweet, a chocolate maker.
I've been in the depths of despair and the storm of anger. I've walked the tightrope of fear. I've been the victim and the bully.
After finding my way through to an amazing life of love, abundance and freedom, I listened to the calling of my heart that lead me to help many people who were stuck like I was.
And I love doing it. I love watching my clients move from struggle to joy.