really great piece. the 4th stanza (with the list) is very well-done, and the specifics in history are what make this poem. I love the fresh subject matter, and the diction used here is really elevated and well thought out. the assonance is also excellent. awesome work here. just to ket you know though, that since magnolia trees is plural rather than possessive, it doesn't need an apostrophe. :)

"Devotion is all fists; muscles carved out of thorny ash." Oh my goodness. Your writing is reaching new heights, my dear. This line is incredible. I've never taken the time to think about one's devotion for another as 'strong' in the literal sense in stead of the 'will-power' sense. Thanks for expanding my mind. Also, the 'rotting horse meat' part completely blew me away-how raw! Keep writing. :)

john chapter 1 . 7/3/2009

this is rather interesting, I don't know what to make of it. It makes me think, about a lot, really, I have to think about it a lot.