Mullet Status: Born and bred in the U.S. of A; would probably look pretty cool under an ushanka.

Plot Synopsis: MacGyver heads to Russia, where he and Portly Pete join forces with a young Russian woman to rescue her father–who is being held as a political prisoner–from a mental hospital. To infiltrate the poorly guarded high security ward, MacGyver poses as a mental patient (and later tries to pass himself off as KGB with an American accent), Pete as his personal doctor and the woman, let’s call her Nadia, as misc. hospital help. MacGyver takes this as an opportunity to look down his nose at Russians, Russia and the mentally ill.

I vink I know vhy zat American man vith zee girly hair defeated us.

Outmatched Opponent(s): The entire Russian continent.

Love Interest (Y or N): Nah – MacGyver is too much of a goodie-goodie to ever land some tail.

Car Boat Chase? (Y or N): Y

Explosion? (Y or N): Y

Exploding Car Boat Chase? (Y or N): Y

Expository Dialogue? (Y or N): Let me relay this information to you with an awkward passage in which I summarize the events that have transpired outside of this review.

Awkward Zoom for Dramatic Effect? (Y or N): N

Tools of the Trade:

–Potato in the exhaust pipe of the Russian secret police’s car (this leads to an explosion)

-Knife, ripped blanket, gasoline cans and life jackets used to create a water blockade during a high-speed boat chase (this leads to an explosion)

-Light bulb; smashed and tungsten filaments used to create lock-picks (“They’re the right size, the right shape.”)