Mar 20, 2013

You Have Two Minutes to Clear the Level, Save the World and Get those Ten Thousand Bucks You Owe Me

Tyler Cherry (Bomberman to his friends) liked to avoid most things incompatible with his biology, like, I don’t know, swallowing ethylene dichloride or getting stabbed with a steak knife.

Tough luck. His blood had found a way out of his body. He fell as one who sinks in molten lead.

A screenshot from Bomberman - one of the many versions out there, at least. I imagined Tyler Cherry would be
addicted to this game.

I don't know what happens to Tyler after this. Maybe a troop of midgets on the way back from a conference stomps into the arcade and goes holy shit, someone call an ambulance, and an ambulance gets called, so Tyler lives, or maybe Bomberman just thinks he's dying because he's overly dramatic that way. Maybe a rival of his just nicked him with a Swiss army knife. Or hit him in the head with a spoon.

At any rate, Tyler's someone who's got his life priorities wrong, so bad things will happen to him, including almost dying.