Heaven Joke: Jesus Christ was going on vacations and needed a substitute, a new Angel have just arrived at heaven and Jesus picked him as a substitute.
Jesus explained him that his job was easy, all he had to do is open the heaven gates at 12:00pm and interview the souls with only one question, "How did you die?"If had die happy could come to heaven otherwise to hell.
Next day the new Angel opened the gates at 12pm and the he started the interviews.
Angel: You! First in line. How did you die?First soul: Me? You are not going to believe it. I was coming home earlier and found my apartment door open, then my wife naked on bed. I knew the son of a b..... was there somewhere, i live on the second floor and looked everywhere, then i saw some fingers holding the window on the living room, was him. I start stepping on his fingers and the motherf.... finally fell but lucky he hit some bushes and didn't die. I then picked up the heaviest thing in the apartment, my fridge, and threw on him. He died, and i was so happy laughing that i had a heart attack.Angel: Wow! Well you were happy so come in. Next! How did you die?Second soul: Me? You are not going to believe it. I was doing my morning exercises and slipped and fell from the window, i live on the third floor, and lucky i held on the second floor, but some son of a b.... stepped on my fingers. Then i fell, but lucky again i hit some bushes and didn't die. And the motherf..... threw a fridge on me, i died.Angel thinking: He was doing exercises and all, hummm.Angel: Ok you can come in...Next! How did you die?Third soul: Me? You are not going to believe it. I was naked inside a fridge....

Joke was originally in Portuguese
Sorry for any English mistake
Still funny i think
Translated by Me