I wrote this cause this is what is going on in my head. It's the darkness against the light. This is the darkness telling the the light to be better. Telling some basic rules. It's pretty dark so be warned I hope you enjoy it any way :)

23:30 So let's establish some ground rules; This is our notebook from now on. No more giving it to Belle and Rixt. You need to stop being so damn weak! Belle got through much more on her own and even though you're a lesser person, you need to be able to look after yourself.

Stop being so dependent, you run to Belle with all you stupid irrelevant problems and manage to turn everything about you. What will it be like when she's gone? Be stonger! Be bloody able to deal with things on your own.

From now one if you have a problem you come to me. No more leaving hints and clues all over the place and still eventually giving her the notebook.

You need to stop eating so much, don't give in. I know you're not strong and chocolat is very tempting but it'll only make you fatter and then no one will like you, is that what you want?! To be forever alone? Or do you want Kevin or any other guy, who doesn't really matter, to like you? At least find you kiss worthy? Cause that'll never happen as long as you're this fat. We need to be able to count those ribs of yours. Every noght sit ups from now on and no more lunch. Have you go that?!

Bring out the fake smile again. You're gonna pretend you're all better again. Fool them into thinking that. Especially de Boer. This madness that drove you into more weakness ends here. She can not know all this. And from now on neither can Belle and Rixt. They're heard enough. You've bothered and nagged them enough. If you go any further they'll leave you cause they're have enough. Is that what you want?! LIke I said; You need to stop relying on thers, cause even your shadow leaves you when you're in darkness.

You also need to quit the damn butterflies. It only makes you more upset when you kill them, specially Belle's (my point; she knows your weakness). You can leave the current one on so she doesn't get suspicious, though coloring it was a bad idea cause you're a terrible liar when it comes to her and she'll probably know something is wrong even though she often can't feel your feelings, which'll come in handy in putting your wall back up. Just don't let her draw a new one.

I guess that's it for today. Keep me close and don't even dare talking about your bloody feelings. It makes you even weaker. I'll see you again when you need me.

Xx

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