[General] Can somebody help me to Fix/Improve/Revise this Request Letter?

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Can somebody help me to Fix/Improve/Revise this Request Letter?

[Urgent /// ASAP]
Hi everybody,
I am helping my friend to write a request letter to the US Embassy for an expedited interview appointment. I need it ASAP.
Generally, it has been done but please help me to Fix/Improve/Revise it. Please feel free to leave any comments/opinions. Please donít care about the details (Date, Name, etc.), I just care about the words, sentences to read/sound in better English style.
Would really appreciate your help.

ď To Whom It May Concern:
I, Mrs. A, am requesting your approval for an expedited interview appointment because:
I have a son, named Mr. B, a current international student at CDEF College in New York City, United States of America, with passport # ABCD1234. He is going to have a Commencement Ceremony on Thursday, June 6, 2013 and he has sent me an invitation letter from his college to attend this special occasion.
As what I have known, if my visa was approved, my visa would be delivered normally within three business days. My current booked appointment date is on Wednesday, May 29, 2013, with Confirmation ID: ***** and Barcode # *****. Therefore, if my visa was approved after the interview on May 29, 2013, I might would get the visa soonest on June 3 or 4, 2013. However, I have intended to arrive in New York on June 4, 2013 to make sure I can attend my sonís commencement ceremony on time and there will be no rush for unexpected problems.
I actually could not apply for the visa earlier because I had to wait for the paperwork which was sent from the United States by my son.
I please request you to understand my situation and approve to give me an expedited interview appointment. I will truly appreciate your approval.
Thank you for your time and have a great day!Ē

Re: Can somebody help me to Fix/Improve/Revise this Request Letter?

Originally Posted by Tuny0921

“ To Whom It May Concern:
I, Mrs. A, am requesting your approval for an expedited interview appointment because:
I have a son, named Mr. B, a current international student at CDEF College in New York City, United States of America, with passport # ABCD1234. He is going to have a Commencement Ceremony on Thursday, June 6, 2013 and he has sent me an invitation letter from his college to attend this special occasion.
As what I have known, if my visa was approved, my visa would be delivered normally within three business days. My current booked appointment date is on Wednesday, May 29, 2013, with Confirmation ID: ***** and Barcode # *****. Therefore, if my visa was approved after the interview on May 29, 2013, I might would get the visa soonest on June 3 or 4, 2013. However, I have intended to arrive in New York on June 4, 2013 to make sure I can attend my son’s commencement ceremony on time and there will be no rush for unexpected problems.
I actually could not apply for the visa earlier because I had to wait for the paperwork which was sent from the United States by my son.
I please request you to understand my situation and approve to give me an expedited interview appointment. I will truly appreciate your approval.
Thank you for your time and have a great day!”

To whom it may concern

I wish to apply for an expedited visa interview appointment.

My name is [full name], date of birth [date of birth], holder of [nationality] passport number [passport number + dates of issue and expiry].

I currently have a visa interview date of May 29th, 2013. However, I understand that it will take three business days to issue my visa, making the issue date June 3rd at the earliest. As I plan to travel on June 4th, I wish to request an earlier interview date.

I wish to travel to the United States of America on June 4th, 2013 to attend my son's college commencement ceremony on June 6th, 2013. My son's name is [full name], his date of birth is [date of birth], his passport number is [passport number]. He is studying at [name of college] and I attach/enclose a copy of my invitation letter to attend this prestigious event.

Please note that I was unable to request an interview date any earlier as I was waiting for the official invitation letter to arrive from the USA.

Thank you for your attention and consideration and I look forward to hearing from you as soon as possible.

Yours

[Your full name]

Remember - if you don't use correct capitalisation, punctuation and spacing, anything you write will be incorrect.