Marina AbramoviÄ‡

Dog burritos. Corinna prefers the pug that looks like an Ewok. Paul prefers the puppy that is wrapped in an actual tortilla. Paddy wonders what the selection criteria we’re all using, and would agree with Paul if there wasn’t the worry that puppy could accidentally be eaten. Given that that’s the case, Paddy chooses the terrier wrapped in leopard print. [Sad and Useless]

After being cleared of phone-hacking charges, media maverick Rebekah Brooks is making headlines again. It is rumored that she will be rehired by Rupert Murdoch to head up the social-networking news site Storyful. Terrifying. [The Guardian]

What makes a movie bad ass? A thoroughly convincing essay on the subject. [The Weeklings]

Triennial reviews are coming out: AFC’s discussion of individual works includes this zinger from Corinna Kirsch “Panels leaning against pedestals. Where am I? An art fair?”. Over at artnet News, Paddy Johnson discuss the Triennial’s obsession with the figure. Holland Cotter at the New York Times says the show adds up to some of the most distinctive art of the past decade. Hyperallergic’s Thomas Micchelli finds the show lacks excitement, and its focus on technology given its ubiquitous presence “feels dated and even a little clueless.” Also at Hyperallergic, Benjamin Sutton found it too crowded. Art Agenda’s Andrew Stefan Weiner says the show looks like a Tumblr and has mixed feelings on its success. On the one hand there’s curatorial legerdemain. On the other, not all the works live up to artist and curator Ryan Trecartin’s example. ARTnews’s Andrew Russeth thinks the Triennial shows that “new ideas are on the rise,” and over at Christie’s, Brienne Walsh doesn’t think the show’s got enough cohesion. Given the number of cohesive moments identified by other critics, Walsh’s thesis is the most easily challenged of them all. [The Internet]

Paul Chan’s Hugo Boss Prize exhibition gets a nod from Holland Cotter at the Times. The reason why, though, remains a bit convoluted. “Mr. Chan’s work is always surprising and as smart as art gets, which means, among other things, that it’s smart enough not to always give us the art we think we want.” [The New York Times]

Yet another adventure in the life of the rich and famous. Swiss business magnate Yves Bouvier has been charged with fraud and money laundering for allegedly inflating the prices of Picasso, Modigliani, Gauguins; those works were then sold to Russian oligarch Dmitry Rybolovlev, who, if it matters to you, owns the Greek island of Skorpios, purchased from the Onassis family. [Luxembourger Wort]

In Bushwick, the Roberta’s Pizza Empire is crumbling. One of the three restaurant’s owners has split off, and is seeking $5.4 million for his stake in the company. [Brooklyn Magazine via New York Post]

Meet Andy Warhol’s family, the Warholas. They’re kickstarting a film called Uncle Andy—with your help! Now, for the low price of $2,500, you too can own a “Rusyn Tradition Decorated Ostrich Egg” painted by Warhol’s niece Madalen. Abby Warhola is apparently well trained in the art of the selfie. [Artforum]

Marina Abramovic is publishing a memoir. If you’re curious why the artist has decided to release a tell-all of her life in the former Yugoslavia, this is indeed about giving people “the courage to do the things they’re afraid to do in their own lives.” [Arts Beat]

“Sparkle on bitches”. So begins the documentation of Christian Grattan’s portable coloring book station in Chelsea. Want the coloring book you see in that video for free? All you gotta do is give Artist Christian Grattan your name and address and he’ll send you one. His coloring book includes figures such as Andy Warhol, Karl Lagerfield, and Oprah. These are his heroes. [Sparkle Artist]

More people calling bullshit on Marina Abramovic. As if the fashion photo accompanying the piece picturing Marina holding a cup to her head weren’t enough evidence on its own. [The Guardian]

Anybody want to hear the story of a woman who helped make twenty two buildings permanently affordable in Manhattan? (Whitney did.) Makers of the documentary It Took 50…, the story of community land trusts in New York City, are speed-raising money on indiegogo to fund the rest of the film. Raise the money, or you’ll all be watching My Brooklyn from Philadelphia. [Indiegogo]

Rich artists in real estate: James Turrell is selling off his Gramercy Park pied-à-terre (ohhhh, fancy) in Gramercy Park for $2.85 million. Maybe he’ll be on track to finish Roden Crater with those funds? [Curbed NY]

Pittsburgh’s August Wilson Center for African American Culture could be turned into a hotel. After the center defaulted on its loans for the building, their bank proposed selling it to New York developer 980 Liberty. Here’s the background piece and here’s the opinion piece. [Pittsburgh Post-Gazette]

People have stolen 40 of Ryan McGinness’s abstract street signs, his public art project in partnership with the New York Department of Transportation. Chances are, a few of them will show up on eBay. [The Wall Street Journal]

New Yorkers have filed 7,031 complaints about the Mr. Softee jingle over the past four years. [The New York Post]

A whole bunch of shots from the Hermitage shouted out over Twitter. [@theBenStreet]

David Carr ruminates on the health of print media and concludes it’s on its death bed. He’s not sure anyone will even remember it. [The New York Times]

The basketball player formerly known as Ron Artest has decided to change his name to “Panda Friend” in honor of playing his next season in China. [ESPN]

When asked if Klaus_eBooks is a financially viable enterprise, its editor, Brian Droitcour, replies succinctly “No.” Their publisher, Klaus von Nichtssagend Gallery, must have loved that. Droitcour goes on to discuss censorship, and the thrust of the project: ephemerality of media. [Art in America]

Kate Beaton’s comics about working in the oil sands. So good. [Kate Beaton]

What’s trending, according to London’s smartest art magazine? Feminist cyborg theory is hot, Charles Bukowski is not. I suppose this is satire. (Behind the paywall.) [Frieze]

Why is everyone leaving the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts? Sylvia Hount will leave her position at the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts to head up the Met’s American art department. This announcement comes less than two weeks after a fellow curator at the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts, Robin Nicholson, gave notice of his leave. [Art in America]

You won’t be able to find any of the Brooklyn Paper’s articles online; they lost their website URL to “Bar & Bat: A Mitzvah Guide.” [Brooklyn Paper]

Rick Perry describes homosexuality akin to alcoholism and the world isn’t that surprised because, really, we’re that used to him being horrible. [Gawker]

This week’s must-read: Molly Crabapple on the lack of support and freedom dissidents like Cecily McMillan and Chelsea Manning actually receive at home. [Vanity Fair]

Art book publishers are battling over who got to Ai Weiwei first. Taschen just released the “first comprehensive monograph on Ai Weiwei’s life and work”; this edition costs between $1,500 and $12,500, and comes wrapped in a silk scarf. Phaidon claims they came first with a 2009 tome they refer to as “the first comprehensive monograph on this key figure in China’s burgeoning art scene.” [Taschen, Phaidon]

Grumpy Cat is set to star in a Christmas movie, airing on Lifetime. In Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever, this furry meme can communicate with a 12-year-old girl. Grumpy Cat’s voice actor has yet to be cast. [The Wire]

Adrian Searle compares Marina Abramovic to a cultish dominatrix in his a tongue in cheek review of her new performance, 512 hours. “I’m waiting for Mistress Marina, the relaxation-class dominatrix, to give me a good telling off. Later, she takes my hand again. “Breathe slowly. Just be in the present. It’s a good feeling.” Not: “See you round the back later, you naughty boy.” But who knows what might happen if you hang around for long enough.” Ha! [The Guardian]

In the world of politics: Republican House Majority Leader Eric Cantor was unexpectedly defeated in the primaries by David Brat, a candidate to the right of him. Speculation is that Cantor’s more “moderate” position on immigration did him in. Here’s how Brat won. [Politico]

Shootings are up in NYC by more than 10 percent this year, and by 31.6 percent when comparing a 28-day period. No cause for the increase has been cited. [The Wall Street Journal]

Yes, your RSS feed is down. Feedly has been hacked. “The attacker is trying to extort us money to make it stop,” wrote a Feedly representative in a blog post this morning. [BBC]

Why does Marina Abramovic make performance art? “I want to show that the public actually can kill you,” she told the BBC Radio 4’s Will Gompertz. How much punch does she drink? [The Washington Post]

Everyone on the Internet’s hedging their bets that Scottish expat Peter Doig will take over Damien Hirst’s position as the most expensive living artist at auction. His painting “Country Rock (Wing-Mirror)” goes on the auction block at Sotheby’s later this month. [The Telegraph]

New York City has been ordered to pay a $600,000 suit that accuses officers of falsely arresting Occupy Wall Street protesters who were walking on the sidewalk. [The New York Times]

What the hell is going on at The Washington Post? Here’s an editorial that talks about how married women are safer than unmarried women. Here’s an editorial that talks about the “supposed campus epidemic of rape” which, according to George Will simply makes victimhood coveted. How did this stuff get published? [The Li.st]

In “I Read Bigfoot Erotica for Research,” writer Robin Hardwick goes where so few would want to go, or bother to go…to the topic of Sasquatch rape. [The Toast]

One, two times a book! Slate music critic Carl Wilson’s much-loved book on Celine Dion and kitsch has been given a second printing. This time around, it includes some new essays by the fellows over at n + 1, Owen Pallett, and for some reason, James Franco. [Bloomsbury]

David Joselit is complaining about Hans Ulrich Obrist’s scholarship. (It’s about time someone did.) Ulrich Obrist has organized an exhibition with art star Marina Abramović at London’s Serpentine Gallery exploring the subject of “nothing” but has not offered up a lineage of artists who have explored this topic. Specifically, Joselit thinks the work of Mary Ellen Carroll, a New York-based conceptual artist, should be credited, as she’s been working on the subject of “nothing” since the 90’s. [The Guardian]

Mark your calendars, there’s a new art fair around. Moving Image, currently held in London and New York, will be expanding to Istanbul this fall. According to fair co-founder Ed Winkleman, the Istanbul edition might mark the first of many roving fairs to come. [The Art Newspaper]

The 9/11 Museum removes a “never forget” cheese plate from their gift store after it was described as the tasteless item in the store. What makes this piece more distasteful than the twin tower Christmas ornaments or any other item in the store was never explained. What’s the big deal here people? The Holocaust Museum has a gift store too. I bet they sell cheese plates; most of these places do. [Gothamist]

Museum conservators are trying out a new way to conserve paintings: light. If a Rothko, for instance, is damaged, the conservators will shine a light (from a digital projector) on the dull spot so that it matches. [The Atlantic]