Dr. Thorpe, author of "Your Band Sucks" on somethingawful.com did a send-up of the new albums from Muse and Thom Yorke. As long as you keep in mind that he's not totally serious (it's impossible to hate as many bands as this guy claims to...), it's really funny. the Muse one made me cry a little with laughter.

I love this guy's column, if you're not familiar you should read some of the archived ones. they're brilliant, but you really have to keep in mind that he's just having fun. I even have to laugh at his columns where he makes fun of Tool and post-rock.

I think he genuinely hates almsot all of the stuff he write about; where he seemed unsincere was when he did the "your genre sucks" part, simply because it wasn't very funny. It's not possible to hate that many genres, although I think it's possible to hate all the bands he writes about, since most of them do indeed suck. Especially Tool.

Are Egyptian Head a real band? Since I couldn't find them on Allmusic.com and judging from his general tone, I would guess not.

A band has “sold out” when their fans no longer get feel like part of an elite clique. This generally happens when a band attracts interest from a major label, who provides them with a higher recording budget, which results in just enough polish to make the band acceptable to a slightly wider audience; unfortunately, the better production generally reveals the band’s basic lack of musical talent, which hipsters could previously not see because it was hidden behind a blurry cloud of “lo-fi.”. What hipsters once assumed were “fractured pop songs” are revealed to simply be “bad pop songs,” and the hipsters aren’t smart enough to figure out why their favorite band suddenly seems to suck way more than before, so they blame it on “commercial production” and this mysterious and ephemeral force of “selling out.”

You've just had a heavy session of electroshock therapy, and you're more relaxed than you've been in weeks.

Dr. Thorpe, author of "Your Band Sucks" on somethingawful.com did a send-up of the new albums from Muse and Thom Yorke. As long as you keep in mind that he's not totally serious (it's impossible to hate as many bands as this guy claims to...), it's really funny. the Muse one made me cry a little with laughter.

I love this guy's column, if you're not familiar you should read some of the archived ones. they're brilliant, but you really have to keep in mind that he's just having fun. I even have to laugh at his columns where he makes fun of Tool and post-rock.

Funniest thing I've read for ages .I love Muse but he does have a point:

The album’s second single, “Knights of Cydonia,” sounds like the theme song to a wild-west Highlander sequel set in Freddie Mercury’s butt. To call the album “bombastic” would be a gross understatement. It’s so grandiose that it makes chandeliers and Faberge eggs obsolete. It’s so flamboyant that it makes Richard Simmons look like Humphrey Bogart. It’s so ostentatious that it would make Liberace’s finest jacket blush.

Personally I don't find the man that funny. Not because I''m outraged but simply because I find his style of humor to be done much better by other people. His jokes are juvenille, and most of the time he relies on profanity to make laughs. Though I did get a good laugh out of the SOAD hatemail.

EDIT: I posted that before reading this particular article which is actually pretty entertaining.

Edited by Equality 7-2521 - July 06 2006 at 02:50

"One had to be a Newton to notice that the moon is falling, when everyone sees that it doesn't fall. "

Furthermore, it is beyond dispute that prog-rock is the nerdiest
music in the world. Prog-rock is all about geeks writing computer
programs to settle the Neil Peart vs. Mike Portnoy debate. Prog-rock
bands are so desperate to be high art that they’re content to sidestep
art altogether, resulting in fat guys in pillbox hats playing
ten-minute solos on fourteen-string basses. Prog-rock is an elaborate,
terrified denial of the fundamental rock and roll fact that no matter
how virtuosic and sophisticated a band gets, some junior-high dropout
could step up with a guitar with four broken strings and play a song
with enough soul to blow them out of the water forever.

Call me paranoid, but I don’t think anyone could be stupid
enough to combine emo, metal and prog-rock accidentally. It’s too
plainly apparent that the result of the union would be the most ungodly
abomination ever wrought on mankind. Coheed & Cambria are up to
something. Maybe they’re trying to destroy music, maybe they’re some
kind of elaborate performance art piece to demonstrate how stupid
American rock fans are, or maybe they just enjoy making sane people
cringe.

"The album’s second single, “Knights of Cydonia,” sounds like the theme song to a wild-west Highlander sequel set in Freddie Mercury’s butt. To call the album “bombastic” would be a gross understatement. It’s so grandiose that it makes chandeliers and Faberge eggs obsolete. It’s so flamboyant that it makes Richard Simmons look like Humphrey Bogart. It’s so ostentatious that it would make Liberace’s finest jacket blush."

That looks like praise to me - if I'd have thought of describing it that way, I would.

Perfect description of what Muse are about - more ostentatious than Liberace's jacket, and more bombastic than... something very bombastic... er... think I'll stick to my own style - but I think that guy likes it really (how could you not!!!)

"The album’s second single, “Knights of Cydonia,” sounds like the theme song to a wild-west Highlander sequel set in Freddie Mercury’s butt. To call the album “bombastic” would be a gross understatement. It’s so grandiose that it makes chandeliers and Faberge eggs obsolete. It’s so flamboyant that it makes Richard Simmons look like Humphrey Bogart. It’s so ostentatious that it would make Liberace’s finest jacket blush."

That looks like praise to me - if I'd have thought of describing it that way, I would.

Perfect description of what Muse are about - more ostentatious than Liberace's jacket, and more bombastic than... something very bombastic... er... think I'll stick to my own style - but I think that guy likes it really (how could you not!!!)

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