Wednesday, November 23, 2011

What the what?

My dad lives 6 houses down the street, which is AWESOME this time of year, because it's like having an extra fridge and an extra oven, as long as you don't mind a chilly walk in between houses.

Sunday night I awarded him temporary custody of our Thanksgiving turkey so it could thaw.

We deep fry our turkey (the first year we did this, I got a hilarious call from my sister, urging us not to deep fry the turkey. I assured her that her rocket-scientist-brother-in-law was accustomed to dealing with much more hazardous chemicals on a regular basis, and not to worry. It became clear over the course of the conversation that she thought we were going to deep fry the turkey inside the house. This is why non-rocket-scientists should not deep fry turkies!) so it's essential that it is completely thawed. If there's a frozen spot, you'll end up with explosive outgassing, as they say in rocketscience, and that's bad.

Due to the mission critical nature of the proper thawing, I just sent my dad the following text:

Can you grope the turkey and make sure it's gonna be thawed for tomorrow?

Excuse me, but I had never deep fried a turkey before. On the news they said how many people had caused fires in their house because the turkey had exploded. Now that I have SEEN the fryer, it's obvious that these people were morons...

Mrs4444First of all, Happy Thanksgiving.Second of all, who told you about my groping/non-groping losing stretch??Third of all, I wrote "Ew, we haven't been properly introduced yet". And "What if its name is TOM!?!?!?!?"Amy suggested dinner with him?/her?/it.I opined that if it ordered turkey it might be canniblism.Forth of all, this family believes that Normal is just a town in Illinois (look it up).Hope your turkey day was a fun one. I'm surrounded by MY turkeys all year long :)Bob, Dad, Grampa Minty