When she says it’s your turn to cook dinner, go ahead and make a fat batch of these Sriracha-loaded Sloppy Joe Fries. You’ll have a hell of a hot meal and she won’t leave dinner up to you for a long time. Win-win.

That Prince of Foods, the almighty Grilled Cheese can only be improved by degrees. Like adding 2 or 3 beers as a side dish or maybe this: ramming it full of homemade meatballs and tomato sauce. C’mon, you can do it. Just follow the recipe.

If you’re like most Sriracha fans, eventually you won’t even need anything to put it on, you’ll enjoy the sauce all by itself. At that point, you’ll want some hot sauce to put on it. You should try this. It’s Sriracha that has been aged in a whiskey barrel for an all-new flavor.

Just like your liver on almost any Friday evening, this beef jerky is soaked in whiskey. Bulleit Bourbon to be exact. A slow-smoking with Texas Pecan wood adds a bit of campfire flavor to the recipe. Available in 4 & 8 ounce packages or better still, bulk quantities.

Unfortunately there’s no actual alcohol in these Hefeweizen flavored jellybeans from Jelly Belly. But they do taste like beer, so they might help you make it through your little angel’s ballet recital. If you chew slowly.

We have an affinity for products out of our former home state of Michigan. Here’s one that proves simpler is better. Dave’s Toffee contains 4 ingredients: almonds, butter, sugar, & milk chocolate. It’s handmade, homemade and will melt in your mouth but stick to your teeth; just like it should.

Let some other schmuck show up to the Turkey Day feast with the embarrassing/sad holiday classic, green bean casserole. A guy like you should show up with this delectable showstopper. Whipped bourbon bacon sweet potatoes taste as good as they sound and if prepared with care, will be devoured instantly.

The idea is just to make it seem like you can cook. Actually learning isn’t necessary. And it’ll be even easier using these idiot-proof pre-made spice blends. Just Cook has created a whole range of natural spice rubs for better-tasting chicken, fish, and beef. You can do it.

Any former reality show idiot can get a book deal. Especially to “write” a cookbook. But Southern chef John Currence won the James Beard award. And this won’t make his colorful personal stories or music pairings any better but at least you know his 130 recipes will be legit.

After you’re done with your bee-pollen & Kale smoothie you’ll need a real breakfast. And this one is so legit it will cause your chest hair to grow chest hair. It’s a pancake recipe that includes beer and bacon on the ingredient list. Yes, man food. You’re welcome.