I LOVE him, but he's not romantic...

So my BF isn't a romantic type of guy, I get it, but he never even makes an effort to make me feel special..our friends are together, been talking for less than two months he takes her to dinner sends her a fruit basket today.. Were going to have a baby been together 1.5 yrs..I can only remember once that he gave me flowers just bcuz..but that's it I'm like shutting down emotionally and feel really sad today...I mean I try, I take him lunch to work, when he spends the night I took breakfast..for his bday I give him presents I know he likes..on mine we were mad so all he did was call and say happy bday in the afternoon..I'm the one always saying I miss him, he says is once in a while..I just feel like pulling away, I know he loves me but damn I do not feel appreciated at all :/Thanks for letting me vent..

So my BF isn't a romantic type of guy, I get it, but he never even makes an effort to make me feel special..our friends are together, been talking for less than two months he takes her to dinner sends her a fruit basket today.. Were going to have a baby been together 1.5 yrs..I can only remember once that he gave me flowers just bcuz..but that's it I'm like shutting down emotionally and feel really sad today...I mean I try, I take him lunch to work, when he spends the night I took breakfast..for his bday I give him presents I know he likes..on mine we were mad so all he did was call and say happy bday in the afternoon..I'm the one always saying I miss him, he says is once in a while..I just feel like pulling away, I know he loves me but damn I do not feel appreciated at all :/Thanks for letting me vent..

i know it can be frusterating but i would say most guys are not the romantic type and if they are its the exception and not the rule. i would love it if my dh did the cute romantic things but he doesnt. i am the one who plans everything...i try and make even simple things special and i feel that he doesnt make important things special (like my birthday, mothers day, etc) unless i plan it. but what he does do is he opens doors for me, takes care of me when im sick, and he makes sure that i am happy...along with many other things. its all the small things he does that show me that he loves me and i wouldnt trade that for anything.

i know it can be frusterating but i would say most guys are not the romantic type and if they are its the exception and not the rule. i would love it if my dh did the cute romantic things but he doesnt. i am the one who plans everything...i try and make even simple things special and i feel that he doesnt make important things special (like my birthday, mothers day, etc) unless i plan it. but what he does do is he opens doors for me, takes care of me when im sick, and he makes sure that i am happy...along with many other things. its all the small things he does that show me that he loves me and i wouldnt trade that for anything.

I agree, it's the small things. Talk to your bf. My husband would tell me that he's romantic, but I barely see it. Hes sweet and has been an awesome husband/father. The one thing I cherish is a poem he gave me I believe before we married then framed it and gave it to me the day we eloped. I have it over our bedroom door... There's still times to this day that I don't feel he loves me or wish he could be more romantic, but he has his way in showing it. Talk to him! Good luck! î—

I agree, it's the small things. Talk to your bf. My husband would tell me that he's romantic, but I barely see it. Hes sweet and has been an awesome husband/father. The one thing I cherish is a poem he gave me I believe before we married then framed it and gave it to me the day we eloped. I have it over our bedroom door... There's still times to this day that I don't feel he loves me or wish he could be more romantic, but he has his way in showing it. Talk to him! Good luck! î—

Thanks ladies you are right! I think yesterday I was just very emotional..yea he's never been abusive, comforts me when Im feeling sick, and I know he just loves me! I will bring it up but just not make it a BiG deal..I'll show him how good it feels for someone to be to romantic and sweet and maybe he will catch on:)

Thanks ladies you are right! I think yesterday I was just very emotional..yea he's never been abusive, comforts me when Im feeling sick, and I know he just loves me! I will bring it up but just not make it a BiG deal..I'll show him how good it feels for someone to be to romantic and sweet and maybe he will catch on:)

I just read the needed to vent part. If it makes you feel better, earlier this year my husband told me " I love you until further notice" they can be massive tools at times, so I totally hear you. Sometimes I would like more romance too, but when DH and I first met, his idea of a gift was to pay for the beer lol. Sucks to get used to, doesn't it ? Hugs!!!

I just read the needed to vent part. If it makes you feel better, earlier this year my husband told me " I love you until further notice" they can be massive tools at times, so I totally hear you. Sometimes I would like more romance too, but when DH and I first met, his idea of a gift was to pay for the beer lol. Sucks to get used to, doesn't it ? Hugs!!!

It's funny how opposite we can be. I am a total romantic at heart and he is not. I love to be silly and he thinks it's immature and stupid. I love passion and he has no idea what passion is or intimacy for that matter.Â I can never compare my DH to any other woman's husband. My BIL is the ultimate Prince in shining armor kinda guy. It's great for my sister, but I would never wish to be married to him.Â Our first official date/out to dinner was a chicken sandwich at BK. I buy my own gifts FROM HIM :) I force him to give me a hug now and then. He has told me he loves me (over the phone) 4 times in the 7 yrs we have been married. He has never looked into my eyes and said it.Â I have to filter what he says to what he means. For example, when he calls me with a raised voice to find out where I am because I am late from work. It means I was worried, you should have called, please hurry home, I miss you. :)He would never buy me flowers because they die and he thinks it's a waste of money.Â So why am I with a guy like this, knowing full well how he was before I married him? Because he works hard for me and his family, is an amazing father, is always looking out for our future, is by my side when I am sick, he keeps me balanced, I know that he loves me without any doubt, he has his own quirky sense of humor and I figure, because we are so opposite, I teach him how to have fun and he teaches me how to keep my feet on the floor. And together....we are amazing and accomplish great things.Â Â

It's funny how opposite we can be. I am a total romantic at heart and he is not. I love to be silly and he thinks it's immature and stupid. I love passion and he has no idea what passion is or intimacy for that matter.Â I can never compare my DH to any other woman's husband. My BIL is the ultimate Prince in shining armor kinda guy. It's great for my sister, but I would never wish to be married to him.Â Our first official date/out to dinner was a chicken sandwich at BK. I buy my own gifts FROM HIM :) I force him to give me a hug now and then. He has told me he loves me (over the phone) 4 times in the 7 yrs we have been married. He has never looked into my eyes and said it.Â I have to filter what he says to what he means. For example, when he calls me with a raised voice to find out where I am because I am late from work. It means I was worried, you should have called, please hurry home, I miss you. :)He would never buy me flowers because they die and he thinks it's a waste of money.Â So why am I with a guy like this, knowing full well how he was before I married him? Because he works hard for me and his family, is an amazing father, is always looking out for our future, is by my side when I am sick, he keeps me balanced, I know that he loves me without any doubt, he has his own quirky sense of humor and I figure, because we are so opposite, I teach him how to have fun and he teaches me how to keep my feet on the floor. And together....we are amazing and accomplish great things.Â Â

When I was a foster parent, our social worker had us read "love languages". I'm not normally a fan of these self-help type books, but this was really eye opening. I tend to show love by doing things for people... Cleaning the house, laundry, cooking, all are ways I show love, so it crushed me that I would be at work late and come home to a messy house and a family that asked me what was for dinner. It was helpful for them to see that I needed to have those things done for me once in a while to feel loved. It was helpful that both my husband and I took it seriously. But ultimately, we cannot change our spouses. He may learn you need it once in a while, but you also need to learn to find the way he shows you he loves you, which may not be romantic gestures.

When I was a foster parent, our social worker had us read "love languages". I'm not normally a fan of these self-help type books, but this was really eye opening. I tend to show love by doing things for people... Cleaning the house, laundry, cooking, all are ways I show love, so it crushed me that I would be at work late and come home to a messy house and a family that asked me what was for dinner. It was helpful for them to see that I needed to have those things done for me once in a while to feel loved. It was helpful that both my husband and I took it seriously. But ultimately, we cannot change our spouses. He may learn you need it once in a while, but you also need to learn to find the way he shows you he loves you, which may not be romantic gestures.

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