Opinion: Why I want to read more ‘Money Diaries’ about millennials spending their parents’ money

A 21-year-old New Yorker was called out on Twitter for her relying on her family to support her lavish lifestyle

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Your dinner companion might have a little help with the bill.

By

MariaLaMagna

Reporter

When I first moved to New York in 2013, I faced steep student debt and initially had no full-time job. I struggled to pay my loans, my $800 a month rent and everyday expenses, and the experience was pretty miserable.

That was my choice, and I was a lot better off than many of my peers.

But as I scrolled through Instagram
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photos of my college classmates traveling in Europe, or noticed that my friends were living in much nicer apartments in more desirable parts of town, I sank deeper into my anxiety about just how I was going to make this all work.

Certain friends seemed able to afford “bottomless” mimosa brunches, every weekend trip to the Hamptons that came up, and every happy-hour invitation, without breaking a sweat, despite having jobs that didn’t seem to pay all that much.

The “Money Diaries” series, which I have been reading regularly for the last several years, details a week in the life of an anonymous diarist. The diarist, who in Money Diaries speak is known as the “OP,” for “original poster,” writes down every expense for the week, as well as monthly expenses such as rent, savings, healthcare costs and car loans.

Commenters weigh in on the diary, often with critical commentary about spending too much in one area, or not enough in another.

Refinery29 relies on submissions for the series, and attempts to feature diarists with diverse incomes and in different U.S. states, or even international cities. They’re so popular that some have been included in a new book.

And an important point about them, for this particular controversial week: They’re not financial advice columns. They’re just a journal about every expense someone is willing to write down.

So I was surprised this week when a diary from a 21-year-old New York City intern caught so much backlash. The diarist, a marketing intern in HR consulting, disclosed that she makes $25 per hour, which probably works out to about $50,000 a year.There’s nothing unusual about that for a first job in New York.

What better way to expose the lie on social media than to read about it — in black and white?

The controversial part: She has no student loans — her parents pay for her education in full — plus they give her $800 a month in allowance. She pays no rent, although her share of a one-bedroom apartment in the West Village is $2,100. Her parents pay for that, too. Her grandfather wires her $300 each month as well.

The criticism on Twitter
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was swift and harsh. YOU SHOULD NOT BE WRITING ABOUT MONEY, one tweet said, in all caps. As of Wednesday morning, that particular condemnation had been retweeted 23,000 times and favorited 80,000 more.

I disagree. This is exactly the type of person who I would love to see disclose more about their personal finances.

Not every young person making it “on their own” or starting their new business “from scratch” is so honest. We know these privileged (or as the Money Diarist put it, #blessed), young adults are out there. But how often do we get to actually hear from them? Yes, some of the writer’s habits are eye-roll worthy (like the frequent mentions of amenities at the pricey gym Equinox). But I found the transparency refreshing — and don’t get upset — even helpful.

“So many young people are out here beating themselves up about not being able to pay rent + student loans + save,” tweeted BuzzFeed’s vice president of news and programming Shani O. Hilton. “EXPOSE THE SHAM.”

That’s the take I agree with. What better way to expose the lie than to read about it — in black and white?

We live in the ultimate era of “keeping up with the Joneses” (and Kardashians). Not only do we have to observe the lifestyles of those around us, but we have easy access to the lives of Instagram “influencers” and other social media stars who flash their lavish lifestyles — without disclosing where all that money comes from.

And if you look at our credit-card balances, it’s not going well for us in the U.S. Americans currently have more than $1 trillion in credit card debt. Yes, you read that right. We paid $104 billion in credit-card interest and fees in the last year alone. That’s up 35% in five years.

Of course, some weren’t criticizing Refinery29, as much as the girl’s spending habits. If there’s something to criticize, it should be the low pay or no pay that some companies often give interns, which makes it impossible for people with lower incomes to hold those positions.

But as for the Money Diaries, I’ll read as many disclosures of spending mom and dad’s money as I can. The 21-year-old in me, who was living in a Harlem apartment wondering how everyone else was making this work, is thankful for them.

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