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Jul 26, 2011

I Matched. I Googled. I Met. I Loved. I Married.

I want to take this opportunity to talk about something near and dear to my heart.

match dot com

You see that coming?

For any of you who don't know, Rob and I met on match dot com. We are definitely and obviously a success story. After going to a couple different colleges I found myself in a pickle. I didn't make any lasting relationship in college (I wasn't at any of them long enough to) and I didn't know how to actually meet anyone. I worked at FDI, which employs a handful of people all of whom I have known for quite a while at that point and none suitable for what I was looking for. Basically the building was overrun by women and any men were married. So I made the decision to join an online dating service. The decision to chose match over anything else was basically just because match was the one I could remember.

So I signed up on the free trial where you can't do much but send 'winks' and look at other people's profiles. But I filled out all the questions, wrote a little bit about myself and what I was looking for. I found some pictures to post. I got everything completed.

Then I started to doubt. In movies and tv shows you always hear characters giving the characters who do try online dating a hard time. Like it's a horrible thing and you are definitely a geek, nerd, loser, insert whatever word you want here. So I didn't want anyone to know I was doing this. It was embarrassing. And then before I knew it I started thinking that maybe I was a loser and all those bad things that nobody wants to be.

Although I felt like crap about that, I didn't stop looking. I was lonely and I knew I was looking for someone. And I knew someone was looking for me. I believed that there was someone out there made for me and me made for him. So I continued to look.

Probably most of you know the story of how Rob and I eventually met. Basically I found him. We were a match, not really anyway, because if you know us at all you know that we are complete opposites. But he was on my daily five. I though his pictures were cute (although he looked slightly different in every single one of them - some of you can attest to that because of the transformation he undergoes when he turns back into a Marine). I then read his description of what he was looking for and I laughed all the way through it. After the first sentence I knew that this was what I wanted too.

So I did something I had never done before and sent him a 'wink.' And then secretly prayed he would answer - that he would find something appealing about me. And sure enough he sent one back. And as the story goes on, you all know how it ends. I married him one month and one day ago. :)

Slowly I have become more comfortable about how we met. Because if you think about this rationally, how else do you meet people? Bars? Clubs? Gyms? Libraries? Yeah sure, but that's not really all that easy. I have never in my life stepped foot into a bar or a club and I don't really regret that at all either. But when you meet people there how do you know that they aren't some sociopath killer and rapist. Because the truth is you never really know someone until you do. So why is this online dating thing so dangerous? Trust me, I googled him before the date and found out as much as I could, and I highly recommend that but the guy you meet in the bar is just as known as the guy you meet online.

But since I have become more open about how we met with people. And since I have had about four different people ask me about online dating and the ins and outs and all the details. And I suggest it for anyone who's looking for someone. I'm not saying that you'll find the person of your dreams because maybe you're meant to find them actually at the library or the gym or wherever, and that's okay too. But why not do something daring and put yourself out there. I would have never found Rob if I had stuck to my normal, safe routine, and that would have been sad. It took courage for me to do this. And I was scared of being rejected or never finding anyone, but sometimes in life you have to put yourself out there and take a chance and risk. It was the best decision of my life.

So I feel sad for all those people out there, specifically single people, who make fun of online dating and confess that it's only for losers. Because Rob and I aren't the only ones who have met online and gotten married, there are many more like us. And just so you know, I'm not getting paid to write about the joys of online dating. Nope, this is just me. Telling you how two completely different people became so crazy about each other and ended up married.