The Rivkin Retort

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

You can call me a nasty old rightwinger if you wish but I cant see why the moslem terror suspects should receive any special treatment while they are being held on terrorism charges. These people have been charged with being members of a religious based terror group and expect prison authorities to allow them to pray together. If the corrections people in New South Wales wouldnt let me out of weekend detention when I had a brain tumour how could these people expect to practice the religion that led them into trouble in the first place?

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Happy New Year to you all, and a belated Happy Hanukkah, of course. Ive been busy showing Kerry about his new accomm this past week so I didnt really get to celebrate too much this NYE. Thankfully I did manage to still wake up in a fetid pool of my own vomit, which is always nice, but of course that kind of thing always leads to the making of New Years resolutions.

This year Ive decided to help other men look as I used to, and so Ive decided to offer my own brand of man-fashion advice that will be as valuable to men everywhere as a few good stock tips, if you catch my drift.

Today on 'Renes Gorgeous In The City' Im tackling the gritty topic of facial hair. As you know Ive always liked the rugged look. A bit of stubble can make the world of difference to public perception, just ask my good friend Russell Crowe. Stubble is also a great way to hide the fact you have a receding mandible, or 'weak chin', as we say in the game.

Have a look at the following BEFORE and AFTER:

BEFORE:

AFTER:

And there you have it, I think the results speak for themselves dont you? Stubble = delicious.

NB: Our gorgeous model showed up in a Google image search for Andrew Bolt, and I couldnt take my bulging eyes of him.

No, although my former employer (a law firm) did find out about the blog and demanded I shut it down. I hadn't been entirely discreet, so I did, only to restart it with a slightly different name and being careful not to mention anything that could be traced back to me directly. (Particularly not talking about work.)

Yes, the "law firm" Jeremy is talking about was only Victorian Legal Aid, but it sounds much more fancy and impressive when you call it a "law firm", doesn't it? And he didn't write about them much when he started his new blog - he just canned his boss a few times and whined about how the Victorian Legal Aid logo looks like the word "no" when turned on its side. I'm sure they would have been fine with that.

Then there's this -

4. How have you responded to these threats?

By being anonymous. I have two blogs, anonymouslefty and boltwatch. BoltWatch in particular is highly political and concentrates on one public figure in particular. I am conscious of Andrew Bolt having in the past made remonstrations to a blogger's employer after feeling that he'd been unfairly criticised, so I am very careful not to have my name directly linked to either of my blogs.

Jeremy Sear is anonymous so Andrew Bolt doesn't find out who he is? Lets hope Mr Bolt cant use Google. Then again maybe he already knows........

Monday, November 28, 2005

Im sorry Ive neglected this blog recently, but even deceased stockbrokers take holidays. I have just returned from a few weeks with my good friend Gina Rineheart. I spent a good deal of time on her private yacht, fisting her man-servant and dining on the freshest shrimp in the west. I was so relaxed I didn't even need to break out my solid gold worry beads once.

Alas I have returned to the daily grind that is purgatory in Sydney, so you can expect to here more from me soon.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

My good friend Mr Lefty is a silly little man - a desirable attrirbute if your a sexually permissive house boy but not desirable anywhere else. In recent posts hes suggested the anti-terrorist raids have been a hoax to divert attention from other matters such as the industrial relations laws. This arrogant little man took time out from his regular posts about his garden and his glittering legal career to post about this? Does he think that Mr Howard lied to the state premiers, ASIO, state police forces and a range of other authorities, and that all those people swallowed the lie and arrested 16 completely innocent people, as a diversion? Mr Lefty should watch what he writes. I might not reveal his identity here - I might give it to ASIO and give him a holiday in Guantanamo Bay.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Yobbo is right about Democrats Senator Andrew Bartlett, a stupid lefty who helped kill his party with his drunken antics a few years ago. This man and his party allowed a flawed, confusing version of the GST through the Senate and helped seal the fate of the party at the last federal election. The GST was unpopular but I didn't mind - at least until I tried to buy packets of Wee Willems at the Silverwater Prison kiosk with only a few coins in my pocket, and they didn't accept my Gold Amex.

Now Bartlett says John Howards control of the parliament is more dangerous that Muslim fundamentalists and that his new industrial and antiterror laws are undermining the constitution.

Yobbo says "In Andrew Bartlett’s opinion, John Howard introducing bills that Andrew Bartlett doesn’t like is the equivalent of beheading innocent schoolgirls and blowing up buildings full of people. All we can hope is that when the Liberal-backed Australian Liberation Army of Disgruntled Divorced Fathers finally put their murderous plans into action, they remember these infidel words and saw Andrew Bartlett’s head off first."

Bartlett forgets its largely the fault of his own party that John Howard can do what he likes. Like all the other lefties he has to accept the decision of the people at the election.

Over the course of my life I spent many an hour at Liberal Party functions greasing the palms of the people who shared my love of the finer things in life so I know a great deal about the political process. One of the things that has always irritated me abouit lefty bloggers is that they refuse to participate in politics.

An example is Marieke Hardy, the script writer from Last Man Standing. Shes always ready to dismiss John Howard and presents herself as a very cool inner suburban woman who is in touch with her sexuality. In her latest smutty post she claims Angry Anderson wants a pair of her soiled underpants. It is true that I handed many a pair of soiled underpants to certain North Shore Liberal MPs in return for favours but that is another story.

Like many lefty bloggers she would never work on an election campaign. Shell bleat about the system and the Liberals but would never think of supporting her side by making letter drops or stuffing envelopes or supporting a fundraiser. I loved Liberal Party fundraisers. With a couple of Shirley Temples under his belt and a few $100 dollar notes stuffed in his trousers, Tony Abbott always showed us his wild side.But like her communist grandfather author Frank Hardy she knows and loves a dollar when she sees it. She is one of the people behind the Polichicks range of leftwing womens underwear that will bring John Howard and the system down any day now.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Now Im dead I will do almost anything to pass the time but even I get bored sometimes.

The person who runs this blog is one of the dullest people alive. His first name is Jeremy. Hes a solicitor but he seems to spend much of his time slandering some of my favorite media people including Andrew Bolt. In between these stories are photographs of his garden and boring posts about his life as a legal eagle.

One of Jeremys side projects is another blog he calls Boltwatch. The rightwingers have swooped on it like investers on my stockmarket tips and are cramming the comments with insults for Jeremy. Underneath the blog title is the blogs motto - "Where Andrew Bolt's Deranged Polemic ... Gets What's Coming To It". Last time I looked the Herald Sun sold more than 400,000 copies a day. According to Jeremys own site statistics he gets about 100 unique visitors a day. Thats giving Bolt whats coming to him Jeremy!

Jeremy is everything thats wrong with lefty bloggers. Hes got his elite private school education, his elite job and his nice house in the eastern suburbs. He spreads his stupid opinions on the internet but wouldnt dream of getting involved in politics because its to much like hard work and he thinks his opinion is worth something because hes such an important man.

Youll be hearing alot more about Jeremy and his friends on this blog so keep watching. If Jeremys nice to me I wont tell you all more about him.