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end-of-life decisions

By Mary Grace

Posted on July 22nd, 2013

I had the conversation with my family members.

My daughter and I talked to Mom about having Hospice and she said she wasn't quite ready, but we continued to talk about it. She eventually realized that going to doctors was not the answer and we called Hospice immediately.

When my father, who had been very healthy most of his life, started a downhill turn, we were approached in the hospital by a person who started the conversation with my immediate family members. Dad’s prognosis was not good and it was suggested that we talk to Hospice for advice. Dad wanted to go home and Hospice made that possible. Given a couple of weeks to live when leaving the hospital, my Dad lived for two years under their care. He actually improved upon returning home. We had to have Dad in a very good nursing home when it became impossible for my Mom and us kids to handle him at home. He was 87 years old when he passed and we were all ready for this because of the conversation.

About 4 years later my Mom was in the same situation. I had moved in with her after Dad’s death as she was suffering from macular degeneration and needed some help. For three years she was doing very well, but slowly things started happening. My daughter and I talked to Mom about having Hospice and she said she wasn’t quite ready, but we continued to talk about it. She eventually realized that going to doctors was not the answer and we called Hospice immediately. She lived with excellent care for another six months. I called everyone Mom wanted to see, to come over. My entire family visited with her and at the very end all of the women important to my Mom were all with her and although she could not speak she acknowledged every one of them.

I may be a little off the point, but I want to say that of course everyone should have the conversation with their loved ones. My children and I have already talked it over and I’m confident that our conversation was well taken by all. Hospice was the catalyst for my family, but I’m so happy to see that your organization can provide this very important service.