February 7, 2013

This Saturday my baby turns one year old! I really can’t believe it. I look through pictures and wonder “where did that chubby, cuddly baby go?!” Little man has decided to start walking this week. I’m caught somewhere between being crazy-proud of him, and nostalgic that it’s going by so quickly.

I’ve been reading his birthmom’s bio today. Wondering how long she spent answering all of those questions! And being thankful that she did. We haven’t met yet, but those sheets of paper give me a little window into seeing who she is. I want to protect her privacy, but I really wish I could share with you what an amazing person she is! I wish I could tell you what little I know of what she’s like. I guess “pretty awesome” will have to do. (That’s my description of her, anyway!) I think it’s so cool to see what we have in common in personality, preferences, and even physical characteristics. I hope someday we can become friends.

I’ve been reading the files from the hospital, too. Thanking God again for how He had his hand on my baby, before I knew he even existed. Soaking up little details that I only know from those records. So thankful to have this piece of my boy’s history to share with him as he grows.

I have a party planned for Saturday. I’ve been planning it for months. I’ve scoured Pinterest, bought supplies, borrowed cake pans and stuffed animals, purchased gifts, ordered a custom t-shirt, planned a fun menu, and generally had a blast. Saturday we’ll celebrate our precious gift from God.

But my heart is breaking, too. Will you pray with me for our birthmom? I can only imagine what Saturday will feel like for her. I’m praying that she will feel an absolute certainty that she made the right choice for her son. I’m praying that God will comfort her heart, and surround her with friends and family. I’m praying that she knows, really knows, how much we love her boy, and how grateful we are that she chose adoption. I’m praying that she knows we love her, and that she is so special to us. Most of all, I’m praying that she knows how much God loves her.

How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! I John 3:1a