San Francisco is a city that loves to have silly costumed
fun. It’s a great place for people who wish they were pirates. Heck, we’ve even got a “pirate store”
that locals love to drop in on to pick up whatever they need in terms of pirate
supplies. No, I’m not kidding;
it’s 826 Valencia if you need to check it out for yourself. So go get your eye patch (or even your
designer glass eyes) and head out into the SF nightlife to pillage the city
like only a good pirate could do.

This is the most authentic pirate spot you’re going to find
in San Francisco. As history tells
it, a storm-blown ship got stuck in the area when the Barbary Coast shenanigans
were taking place and an entrepreneurial guy cut a hole in it to make a door,
installed a gangplank to get you in and started serving alcohol. It’s a neighborhood dive that doesn’t
require you to wear an eye patch to fit in with the old sailors (but wearing
one would probably be okay as well).

2. Amnesia Bar, 853
Valencia (@ 19th St.) The Mission 415.970.0012

No one is going to blink an eye if you start acting like a
pirate in this Mission bar because it’s located just doors down from “the
pirate store”. With everyone
glowing from the red lighting, it looks like a place where pillaging and
pirating is meant to take place. Just
hope that no one’s wooden leg is catching your toes when you find your way to
the dance floor.

Also located close enough to “the pirate store” (at least at
their Mission location), Cha Cha Cha is a San Francisco favorite for low key
tapas and low-priced drinking.
It’s not quite the spot of the sailors but if you’re a modern day pirate
who is trying to find a place to blend in with the other sea-faring folk who’ve
been landlocked for awhile, here’s your spot.

Ah, but if you want to really create in a ruckus in a spot
that conjures up images of pirates and their original destinations, head over
to the East Bay to this spot in Oakland where banana trees, coconut rum drinks
and Calypso nights will make you feel like you’ve gone a lot further than just
to the other side of the bridge.

5. The Alembic, 1725
Haight St. (@ Cole St.),The Haight
415.666.0822

Everyone knows that what a pirate needs is a bottle of rum
(and a yo ho ho to go with it, of course). The Alembic is the San Francisco spot where you can go get
started on the rum and keep drinking until you’ve finished the bottle. Note that you’ll probably end the night
swaying and singing “A Pirate’s Life For Me”.

For a true rum bar head over to Smuggler’s Cove. They have
an extensive list of cocktails that are almost all made with rum. Many of these
are historic drinks that were popular in the Prohibition Era and in old Havana.
However, there are also some new cutting-edge drinks. The bar has two hundred
different types of rum, seventy different cocktails and always uses fresh juice
in its drinks. Plus it’s called Smuggler’s Cove. What more could you want as a
pirate?

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