Discussion (56) ¬

I just recently found this comic and was noticing Amanda has a lot of characteristics associated with something called Reactice Attachment Disorder, a disorder usually stemming from abuse as an infant.I work as a EA with special needs kids and worked with a few kids with similar backgrounds as Amanda as well as similar behaviors such as anger, need for attention, and and lack of empathy. I was wondering if you had heard of this and if so was it inspiration for the character or am I inferring too much?

I’m afraid I can’t claim Amanda’s issues to have been inspired by Reactive Attachment Disorder specifically, as this is the first I’ve heard of it. Amanda’s behavior patterns come from a hodge-podge of readings on children with behavior problems and a general template of “angry and lashes out at others”.

Isn’t that the stuff that “Child of Rage” (Beth Thomas) had? You could look up the documentary on her on YouTube, or look for the movie based on her starring Dwight Schultz, which has the same name.

But Amanda doesn’t seem to match that disorder, which is a critical lack of empathy. Amanda has emotions including the ability to cry, and she has some level of bonding with her peers, and some level of sympathy with Selkie for that matter. A girl who is like Beth Thomas would show none of that.

I’m assuming the kids you’ve worked with have disorders not as extreme as Beth’s. Certainly there’s going to be a range of behavior, and Beth is just at the extreme where she calmly discusses trying to kill her little brother or her parents without any feeling or conception of it being wrong or anything. If you can handle that sort of disturbing footage, it’s interesting to watch.

(Also, good thing Amanda is not that bad, because that would change the whole tone and length of this comic. Beth did get cured, eventually, but it was a lengthy path to walk and involved some rather odd techniques to get her to appreciate that hurting others was hurting herself as well.)

It is the same disorder as in that film yes, I have not seen it though. Fun fact about Autism, RAD, and so on is that every case is very different, you could study Autism for 25 years and only understand the cases you have studied at least that’s what my boss tells me. Amanda reminded me a lot of my very first case, both adopted coming from abusive backgrounds, lashed out other for very similar reasons, and like Amanda ultimately just wants attention and love. And they way you approach these cases is very similar to what is recommended in the comic, slow and make them feel like they are in control but also not giving them an inch. It seems though it was just a very strong conquincidence

I love how Amanda is unfazed by Selkie’s screech. That’s pretty impressive of her. Also, while Selkie was clearly having fun, Amanda was indeed getting annoyed and angry, but I find Selkie’s reaction to getting super markered a little much. They were out to marker each other to begin with and Amanda took the opening and delivered the killing blow so to speak. I think Selkie is about to get a stern talking to, Amanda as well, because she was taking it too far at that point because you can easily see she’s getting angry, but I think Selkie is more in the wrong here.

Selkie is an obligate carnivore. Full-on predator. Until a few moments ago, she was play-fighting with a packmate. Look at puppies or kittens sometime. Lots of pouncing and play-biting but nobody actually gets hurt. It’s how they learn to interact.

… Right up to where Amanda lashes out in a way that’s *not* play-fighting, but actually meant to *hurt*. In other words, shit just got real.

I suppose her natural reaction as a predator is pouncing, yes. But as a person, who is civilized and knows better than to attack people just because they piss you off, no. She knows Todd won’t agree with her for it. If she was cornered and being threatened, then yes, but Amanda scribbled on her face.

Yes, Amanda is clearly getting angry and frustrated and she probably would’ve started being insulting very soon, but Selkie is in the wrong for jumping on her. Now Andi is gonna have a bad impression of her unless Todd explined to her that Amanda bullies Selkie. She’s been told they hate each other, but I don’t think she knows the extent or that Amanda instigates things, so now it makes Selkie look bad. If she were to bite Amanda with her toxic saliva, Andi might even threaten to never let Todd see Amanda again and she’d win because his ‘adopted violent toxic daughter’ ‘attacked’ Amanda. And if that happened I’d be horribly sad.

Either kids today are a whole lot more civilized than when I was young, or you’re expecting a lot from that eight year old girl.

We used to play a game called Swap Rocks. You’d punch each other on the upper arm, I hit you then you hit me then I hit you, etc. This would go on until one got to hurting and would “give”, and the other guy won.

But sometimes one would hit HARDER than what was called for, in the Spirit Of The Game, and the other would immediately change from “we’re playing a game” to “that sumbich HIT me”, and instead of hitting the arm next time, would go for the face.

Break the nose, knock out a front tooth, and as the hurt guy is lying on the ground, crying in the blood and the snot, kick him a few times.

Because it went from PLAY to WAR. Just That Quick.

Kids, down at the bottom, are savages. All of ’em. They have to have it trained out of them – LEARN to be civilized. At eight – it’s still real close to the surface.

Well everyone always says how mature and civilized Selkie is compared to other children. And the fact that she knows better because of incidents with Truck and his father. She’s been told by Todd before as well as not to take offense over things to the point of getting very angry, a good example is the cafe worker who was confused as to whether or not she was sick.

Besides that though as a child my gut reaction was NEVER to tackle someone or assault someone else unless my very being was threatened and I had no option to run for escape. Even playing, my reactions were always just getting angry and maybe shout a little or getting up and leaving the room, never to attack. None of my friends ever physically jumped on their friends or siblings either even while rough housing.

The absolute worst I had seen as a child around this age was shoving, but never hard enough to shove another kid over. So to me, Selkie tackling Amanda to the floor seems very barbaric compared to what everyone has said she is. Which is kind, patient, forgiving, clever, and mature. This isn’t to say she’s some sort of monster, but that she is indeed wrong to do this.

not to mention, markers aren’t soft. I don’t think that when Amanda lost control and attacked Selkie’s face, she was careful not to hurt her. Faces are delicate, and getting hit with a marker isn’t fun.

I talked to some friends about doing a barbershop quartet at a con if William Shatner was ever slated to be there. We’d all dress in one of his costumes except I would be Zapp Branigan and we’d call ourselves the Singing Shatners. With all that entails.

And a case of missing green and purple markings on Todds face (which are back next page)
(post got refused as spam on first try and as duplicate on second try, but is still not there, therefor third try)

Nah, I see how you could get that, but it does appear that the line across is the line where the fingers bend, and the pinkie is drawn apart from the rest. Seems correct. Probably wouldn’t even be questioned if it were fully in view.

I meant to say this in strip 692: it looks like someone doesn’t understand the concept of joking around. Later I was going to say that it was going rather well but now it looks like what was to Selkie just playing around has escalated into to a full on fight.

I hope this is stopped by adults Right Now. It is no longer a play-fight and may rapidly escalate beyond markers. They could both get hurt! Selkie has carnivore-teeth and poisonous saliva; Amanda can punch hard and is also aware of those vulnerable gill slits where a punch could really do damage.

I don’t think this group has any history that would let them know how much physical violence is too much physical violence. Plus, Todd’s got a history of physical abuse and would find this more distressing than a person without that history.

I don’t know how much gender changes how aggression works itself out. I know that, statistically, males use physical aggression while females use social aggression. It’s possible that guys, who are used to using physical aggression to solve things, are also used to that being the end of the matter, while girls, who aren’t used to it, see it as part of a longer context, but that’s just a hypothesis based on your idea there.

This does seem like a dangerous setup and the ONLY thing that’s making me even consider letting it continue is that both parents are here in the room. If either parent were missing, I’d say no question make it stop.

I’m still saying almost no question make it stop, but that’s out of CPS still being involved with both kids, and the likelihood that a small fight could lead to big consequences.

How I see this going: Todd stopping Selkie from attacking Amanda but gets bit. Selkie flees to her room due to guilt thinking he might ‘send her back’. But this will provide a new insight to Andi and Amanda on Selkie and Todd.

But this arc has been one of my favorites 🙂 Dave, you really can’t go wrong in whatever happens

And this is exactly how it goes down with kids. My daughter and her bestie have gotten into it over innocent things as well. One child may do or say something they mean to be innocent (mostly her friend—she is a very literal kid who has some boundary issues with bodies and words) and the other takes it personally. Though to be fair, they don’t try to *murder* one another—and they also are about 2 years younger than Selkie and Amanda. 🙂