The adventures of a filmmaker and wolf conservationist

11/26/2014

08/17/2014

This summer has been great! I got to work and be with lots of wonderful human beings of all ages in the US, Germany, Slovenia and Britain. Of course, our wolves were the big topic and we did lots of film screenings, too. One of the highlights was doing wolf outreach in my niece's and nephew's elementary school in Germany. The whole school was there, all ears.

As she sat mesmerized in the front row, soaking in every single word I said, all bright eyed and bushy tailed, a first grade girl was bursting from the seams and raised her hand: "So what you are really doing is nursing the wolves back to health, right?" she asked me, beaming from ear to ear. "I want to do that, too." Tears welled up in my eyes and I nodded. I had never thought of it that way and it became very clear to me that we were nursing ourselves back to health along with the wolves. Thank you beautiful little human being for your wonderful words of wisdom ...

Also: wonderful news from Germany! In spite of poaching and traffic deaths, our wolves are now residents in five different states, have formed at least 19 families and number about 100 or more in the last official wolf count! Way to go wolves!!! We love you and want you to stay here on this earth with us!!!

This summer has been very interesting. Just when I thought that maybe my heart would get a little break from being in the midst of it all I went to document the annual bison haze. For those of you who are not familiar with it, we have only a few thousand wild bison left in the lower 48 states. All other bison are either crossed with beef, hence beefalo or selectively bred for docility behind fences. Our last wild plains bison live in Yellowstone National Park and migrate out of there in the spring in search of food and to reach their calving grounds to give birth.

Horseback riders from different agencies, sometimes even using helicopters or ATVs are hazing them back into YNP because of "conflict" with livestock over grazing rights. But really, once more it is about the binary of wild versus domestic, useless versus useful animal not unlike it is with the wolf and cattle. And about animals doing what they want and not being controlled.

I witnessed hundreds of bison being driven back into the park in cowboy manner, some of them in the process of giving birth, some babies just hours old, still wet from their birth and some older animals limping and straggling behind, through dust and a major river. At one point one mother got separated from her calf while crossing the river and went back to find her. She was mad and made a dash for the horsemen/horsewomen and would not let go of her search until she found her baby. A perfect example of the intactness of these animals.

I followed the hazers, wondering if the bison would now see me as a hazer as well. If I was indeed hazing the hazers, entrenched in our human quest for finding fault, finding a culprit, an easy answer. "Them bad guys" versus "us good guys", another binary. Yet, I found that it was the very same hazers that interested me the most in a non judgmental, curious and open way. "Who are these people really?" was the question I posed to myself. The bison seemed fairly ok in spite of their predicament, even calm and like I mentioned earlier with completely intact hearts and instincts. They kept on talking to each other softly, protecting the babies and waiting for each other, helping each other for the good of the herd. They waited for the mom who was giving birth and could not keep up with the pace of the haze. Her herd mates fused to leave her behind and hence were left there with her and her baby until the next day so she could give birth in peace.

It was the hazers who seemed most uncomfortable in their roles. Not all of them, but a significant percentage of them. They appeared disconnected from each other and in need of proving themselves, to stick out, be more than, better than in vivid and stark contrast to the bison who moved as One . "Are they only doing this because of job security?" was one of the questions I asked myself. It occurred to me that only some horsemen/horsewomen were fully invested in this hazing action, others seemed as equally touched by the mothers separated from their calves, by the constant dust, the peacefulness and calm of the animals as I was. "Maybe", I thought to myself, "I am really here to bear witness to the unraveling of something very old and deeply encrusted." I could not stop the haze anyways, these kinds of efforts would have made me a criminal in the eyes of the law and taken me out of my work. Bearing witness to the silent suffering of the animals was all I could do. As I was blessing the bison and telling them "hang in there, we are working on it" and "I love you and want you to stay wild" I became aware that I was bearing witness to the beginning of the end of hazing bison. And to the beginning of the end of binary thinking in my own heart.

03/02/2013

On a plane trip last year I sat next to a very kind and wonderful lady. We started talking and as usual after about 45 seconds I mentioned our wild animal nations and my heart’s desire and life’s work for a healthy coexistence with them.

As it turned out she was on the same page as I and proceeded to tell me the very moving story of her “good neighbor”.

She lives in an area that is frequented by coyotes and bobcats, owls, hawks, and other wild ones that not only hunt rabbits and rodents but also take out the occasional cat who had escaped from the safety of the house.

One day, she recalls a neighbor came and rang her doorbell, imploring her to sign a petition for one of her other neighbors to stop killing the coyotes in the area by trapping and snaring them, then skinning them and hanging their fur in his back yard to dry. A vast majority of the neighbors were taking a stand against this “common” practice since there is no law to protect coyotes from such a fate.

Not only were they against the killing of their wild neighbors but they explicitly stated in their petition that they had moved to the area to be with wild ones and to share their territory since they were aware of the fact that our animal nations had inhabited the area way before they ever did.

Enough people signed to make an impact and the petition was delivered to the coyote hunter.

His response surprised them when they read his letter.

“I have always considered myself to be a good neighbor” it read “and find it shocking to learn that this is not the case in your eyes”. He had been in the area for 40 years and thought that he was doing his neighbors a favor by eradicating the local coyotes for the safety of his fellow human beings and their pets in favor of domestic animals. That was how he had been raised and up to this point he had never questioned his stand on wildlife.

It took his neighbors’ letter to trigger a change of heart on his part.

Please never let us forget the power of We, the power of our collective heart and voice paired with education. Many of us are “only” perpetuating in good faith what they have learned from those that came before them. It takes our courage and voice to speak up without anger from an open heart and change what is outdated, outmoded and does not serve us anymore.

02/21/2013

Just recently I had the incredible opportunity to encounter the last wild bison of Europe in Poland. At the moment, we are working on a video about the last two species of bison on this earth, the American bison and the European bison to tell their story.

I was on a tight schedule and yet, I knew it in my heart that we would find each other since it was crucial that I would see them in the WILD, displaying wild behavior instead of in captivity. That we would make contact so that I may understand them better and forge a connection.

It was snowing when we saw them. Big, thick snowflakes were falling to the ground in front of their faces, a soft, cottony veil that gave the whole scenario the impression of the ice age returned. They are smaller than American bison and do not live in large herds, they are wood bison who live in small bands in forested areas. The last one in the wild got killed in 1927. At that time, around 50 animals survived in Zoos. Their reintroduction into the wild began decades later.

There were about 44 in this particular herd, the largest herd that anyone would probably get to see in Europe anymore. Tears of joy and recognition froze to my face and I took down the barrier that the binoculars formed in front of my eyes. I wanted to see them wild and free, without any aids and without the urge of needing to get closer. Something primal stirred in me and I felt a sense of recognition and awe, of gratitude and wonder. Yes, I would do whatever it takes to help them thrive in the wild. Of that I was sure. We need them here on this planet with us as much as we need the wolves.

12/24/2012

I have been blessed all through this special year 2012 with being able to do our outreach work and collaborate with human beings worldwide who seek change on this planet towards more caring and connection that includes our animals and our earth. Joining forces with like-hearted others has been the highlight of it all!

Personally, it has been the most connected time in my entire life. It feels like the floodgates of my heart are open to all life now and deep caring for the whole has settled in that was there all along, but just now has had a chance to be fully expressed in my work and how I show up in this world.

From this vantage point, I have concentrated on what works, what is already being done to alleviate the suffering of humans, our animal, plant and mineral nations and our earth. I have let go of assigning blame and have moved more fully into collaboration and connection with others instead.

It has been truly amazing what has come from this. Yes, there is more pain now that I am open to taking it all in, and yes, it is not easy. But it is the only way to be and live for me anymore. In a way it is a return to who I was when I was little. This human being who found the utmost joy in taking care of nature, caring for all the creatures within her reach and being happy. We all have that sense of connection and caring within us. The time is now to reconnect to it and go from here.

Blessings to all of you in 2013 and beyond. This is just the beginning!!!