Some of us look the other way when a good question sidles up alongside us. We worry we just might have to answer it if it gets too close, and if answered honestly, we may have to do something about our lives.

Others are bolder than that. They go looking for good questions to answer, knowing the answers will point and direct and uncover and reveal and inspire and motivate.

Which tack you take determines the value the following questions produce and the trajectory they have the power to recalibrate in your life.

Three Powerful Questions

“The simplest questions are the most profound.” ~Richard Bach

Question #1: Where Does this Path Lead?

This single question more fundamentally changed my life than any other question I’ve ever asked of myself.

The Setting: About a million years ago (give or take), I was playing a video game at a pizza parlor after school when a friend came up to watch me play. After a while of watching, he asked if I had been partying. He could tell. When I told him I had, he shrugged and grunted the sound of disapproval and turned and walked away.

At first I was puzzled. I mean this guy was a regular party buddy of mine. But here he was all disappointed with me as though he had suddenly become a nun. I cursed at him under my breath.

But then I started thinking.

The Question: It was then, for whatever reason, that I dared to ask myself the scariest of questions for those who have lived their lives without much personal thought, planning, preparation or direction.

I asked myself where this path I was on was leading, where it was headed, where it was taking me. I wondered as I stared blankly into the empty future, “What good is at the end of this road?”

I couldn’t answer; I saw nothing positive down that road. No value whatsoever. No future worthy of who I knew I should become. So I went cold turkey. I simply stopped partying … and never looked back.

Where would I be without having asked that question? I shudder to think.

“Questions are the creative acts of intelligence.”~Joan Borysenko

Question #2: What Weakness is most Hurting those I Love?

Your biggest weakness is your worst enemy. What would you do to protect your family? To what lengths would you go to save them from harm?

Well, not only is your character being undermined by your darkest weakness, but your most important relationships are being harmed as well.

Did you know termites destroy more homes than fire in some states? They cost the southwestern United States over $1.5 billion. They sneak in and stay concealed until the damage is done, eating away investment and home.

There are also insidious bugs that infect character and conscience and slowly chew away at the foundations of happiness and harmonious relationships and love. Those need to be dealt with at least as urgently as termites in your home.

It’s easy to point fingers and blame. But when I started taking responsibility for the termites in my own life, all my most important relationships improved as well.

Question #3: Why Not?

Granted, this question can be used to ill-effect as well. Rob a bank? Why not? YOLO! But used responsibly and perhaps with adult supervision, it can lead to some amazing opportunities as well.

Thinking of starting a business? A blog? Training for a marathon? Picking up a new hobby? Joining a church? Traveling?

Why not?

Some will ask themselves rhetorically, as though the question itself provides the obvious answer: “Who am I to do such things?”

But I’m here to ask you a better question: “Who are you not to?”

And so I started martial arts, wrote a children’s book, a historical novel, created a series of greeting card designs, designed two different board games, moved to Taiwan to serve the people there for two years, changed my life in dramatic ways, changed careers and started a blog all as a result of “Why not?”

Granted, other questions often followed that moved me in one direction or another, sometimes quitting one thing to start another. Books weren’t published, cards rejected, activities quit.

So what! I’ve had fun doing what I’ve done, learning what I’ve learned, picking up one skill, then another.

What was the alternative? Watch more TV? No thanks!

Do something you’ve never done before, something you’ve always wanted to do, or are curious about. Do something out of character, or right up your alley. Do something you’re afraid to do or something you love. Do something never done in the history of things being done by all the people around the world doing them.

“You can tell whether a man is clever by his answers. You can tell if a man is wise by his questions.”Naquib Mahfouz

Ken,
Great questions and a good reminder that we never know what impact we may have on those around us. I doubt your “party buddy” had a clue he was an influence helping you look for a brighter path.
What example am I providing? What can I do to help?
Good but tough questions abound when we are brave enough to look and even a little willing to admit we don’t have all the answers.
Thanks for another great article. Mary

Great point, Mary. Actually, never thought of it before from that angle. What a great perspective. I’m not even sure he knows. We had a parting of ways as he got back into partying and kicking up several notches into some hardcore stuff and I went the personal development and religious route. And what a difference those paths made!

I love the questions you added! For whatever reason, I’ve always been very conscientious of the example I was setting, even when below the surface, I wasn’t living particularly well. I still understood the impact example can have and protected mine (and not in a self-serving way to protect image and reputation, but truly to avoid being justification for someone else to take an ugly path or follow me down mine directly.

We’re all just groping in the dark a bit, aren’t we, Mary! Some have a few answers others don’t while we have a few some don’t. When we mix it all up, hopefully we’ll find that between us all, we’ve at least have most of the really important answers.

Fine questions ken,
They will mean something different to each of us and will be asked in differing circumstances however they remain valid for all.
Best wishes and
be good to yourself
DavidDavid Stevens recently posted … The Art of getting it together – a practical exercise

Thanks David! You’re right about what the questions mean to each of us and how we answer them. We’re all on different paths, even when pointed in the same direction. Circumstances and histories and personalities and mindsets and so many other details are so varied that there really is no way we could possibly answer those questions in precisely the same way.

Hi Ken,
I too appreciate the value of asking (and answering ) a good question! Those are great questions too. I particularly like the fourth one 😉 : “Who are you not to?” More TV never helped anyone, but imagine all the possibilities waiting for off the sofa! 🙂
LoriLori Gosselin recently posted … Do You Know What You’re Doing?

Hi Lori,
I knew you would! It seems like every post you put up at Life, for instance is in the form of a question. I love that. Great questions call us to produce great answers, right? At least when we’re brave enough to answer them truthfully and follow the path laid out by the answer. Anyway, gotta go watch some TV on the sofa! (J/K!) 😉

Well, that sure was an eye opener! I can say with complete honesty that I have taken #2 to heart, and done something about it. My dark character flaws were definitely hurting the ones I cherish most! I am doing so much better at it, but still have a ways to go 🙂

#1 is something I have pondered for years, and again, in perfect honesty, I never knew where I was heading, if anywhere. I have looked down that road for so long I know every dip, chip and stone, but I also know that my life is not a waste of my or anyone’s time anymore. I have purpose now, and direction.

As for #3, well that’s a little harder. I am a self proclaimed non-starter. Why? Because I fear being a failure. Simple, yet not…it’s something I strive to overcome every day of my life. And I will continue to try and overcome it until I beat it into the ground!

Your post is powerful and very thought provoking, but then, so far everything I’ve read of yours is. Keep em coming. You inspire people to try harder, be better and learn about themselves.Janet Benson recently posted … The Tao of Badass Pdf

If I do nothing else but open eyes, my work will be justified. So thank you so much for sharing that, Janet.

We all have darker parts of our natures and underdeveloped parts of our characters. And these darker or underdeveloped parts almost always affect our relationships in large or small ways. That’s to be expected. The hope is that we see those parts, then go to work reducing them or replacing them with something better, right?

“Where does this path lead” can’t always be answered if we’re on a positive path. If I open a new business, I can hope and plan to be somewhere in the future, but I can’t know. And that’s OK. We’re not always supposed to know. Figuring out how to respond to some new development is half the fun of life, and certainly at least half the education life offers. But when we’re on crooked paths, that’s when the question provides it’s true potential as a course-changer.

“Why not” opens us to so many opportunities. We don’t always have to jump at the opportunity to try everything that presents itself. There truly are legitimate reasons why not for some things in life. But for those that would enrich your life, taking the leap may be just what’s needed. Maybe asking yourself “where is path taking me?” to your non-starter habit can help you start starting, at least a little.

So glad I was able to give you something to think about, Janet. I loved reading your comment and hope my work here continues to inspire.

PS: Keep an eye out for the launch of my upcoming blog. It’s called The Daily Thought Blog: Daily Inspiration for Inspired Living. It may still be a few months away (working on the internals still), but it’s around the corner.

If you never try – you never know, if you never ask – you never learn, if you walk ignorant through the world you will never know her beauty.

Life, the one lived day by day, is only as exciting as each of us make it! After seven and a half years of homesteading we are forced (by ourselves mind you) to leave or stay. There are advantages and disadvantages on either side, but something will surely tip the scale…

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About Me

My name is Ken Wert, the founder of M2bH. My purpose here is to teach you how to live a richer life of greater purpose and meaning, of mind-blowing possibility and deeper, more soul-satisfying happiness than you ever dreamt was possible. Join us on this happy adventure as you learn how to unlock your hidden potential to enjoy the rewards of a life well lived. Read more ...