Okay, I am going to shoot straight with you right now because I trust you and know that you of all people won't betray that trust. Here goes: I am one of the 7 adults in the United States who still tunes into Glee every week and I'm not even going to pull that "it's a guilty pleasure" excuse. No, I watch it because, in spite of its many glaring faults (their recent Love, Actually themed Christmas episode was literally the worst), I genuinely like it. And just about 80% of that like is tied to the ever charismatic Darren Criss who has the unique ability to tackle almost any genre of song (except rapping — no more rapping, please) with skill and aplomb and be totally handsome about it.

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Here's the thing though: Glee and Darren Criss are both marketed primarily towards teenagers no matter how many scissoring jokes the show adds and no matter how many pervy 25-year-old bloggers want to turn Criss into their tight pants-wearing pocket boyfriend. Teens are the ones who buy Glee songs on iTunes and run Darren Criss Tumblrs. They are who this whole circus is ultimately for and sometimes I forget that. But then I'm reminded by something like Ryan Murphy tweeting a photo of a methodically waxed Criss dressed as a shirtless Santa Claus.

Ooh! Ahh! Aughhh! Congrats, Murphy. You've turned a wildly attractive young man into a hairless, sexless, Dean Cain wax figurine that all the 12-16-year-old girls and boys out there will feel very safe loving:(