should I be blogging about my children?

November 3, 2017

3 minute read

Sometimes I regret not keeping a better record of when my children were smaller, time seems to have gotten away from us all quicker than I anticipated. I brought a journal a couple of years ago titled “things my kids say” in the hope I would write down things that I wanted to remember forever, funny, hilarious, child like things that captured their unique personalities. I think I only wrote in it a couple of times, an example of good intentions not carried through.

I didn’t even know blogging existed when my children were tiny. Aspen was already 10 years old before I discovered this big wide world of blogs. I wish I had known about them sooner, maybe I wouldn’t have started one then, but it would have been great to get advice, and not feel so isolated. Then again, maybe I would have started one sooner and now I would have a better record of those early years.

What is a record anyway, is it photographs, or words that make up stories when strung together? Or are records simply held in our memories? There is so much I remember, but other things I don’t recall unless I look back at images, or things jotted in their baby books. I must admit I was better at keeping Aspen’s baby books up to date, I had a photograph of her in every outfit, and endless video, I have less of April and even less of Adam. The more children I had the slacker I became at keeping records. It is not a measure of love, perhaps just a measure of how busy my life became as we added to our family.

I was reflecting the other day about whether I should share photographs of my children online, or share stories that involve, or are about them. Is it wrong? Even though they are happy for me to do so, can they really make informed choices at their age, probably not! I guess I don’t look at what I share as being public, and yet in reality it is. To me it feels more like I am talking to myself through typing these words, but I guess that is naive. My blog is not solely a ‘mummy blog’ though, I don’t only write about them. It isn’t really a blog about anything in particular, just me, reflecting and thinking on paper, (or a keyboard). I am not sure if they will one day say “mummy I wish you didn’t write that“. I hope though that they are happy to have this little record of their life, and of their mummy’s life. I hope if they ever read this they will know me a little better, and hopefully it will inspire them to follow their own dreams, and not be afraid to share their own stories with authenticity.

For now I will ponder this, and hope I am making the right decision for them and for me.

Here are my favourites from this weeks #mummyshot community on Instagram, thanks to everyone who tagged us this week!

I worry about this all the time. But my memory is terrible so I see it as a record. I also have some tough conversations with my kids and I want to note down how I’ve explained things in case they come up again. Being adopted I don’t share their identities. I’d love everyone to see how beautiful they are but that’s a selfish feeling! I also want to raise awareness of how positive adoption can be and I’ve had some really lovely messages from people saying that it’s helped them to read the blog. #thesatsesh

I’m only blogging for about 7 months and my children are older so I didn’t have the opportunity to record their every milestone from when they were babies. Which is also a good thing, I think. I see myself as an “inbetween” blogger and not a mommy blogger – who blogs about everything not just about parenting. There are a few posts where I blog about them specifically but I allow them to read it first and if they happy – I will post it (as they at an age where they can read). My first posts featured photos of them showing their faces, however I’ve decided not to do this any longer. To protect their privacy I post photos not showing their faces.#TwinklyTueday

It’s certainly an interesting question and one I don’t know if there is a right or wrong answer. I know that my two boys who are now teenagers would NOT want me putting their pictures online or commenting on what they have been up to. I guess time will tell whether those who do blog about their children if their children are indeed happy about it – when they start getting older they will soon let their parents know!

I’ve been thinking about this too. I love having a record of time spent as a stay at home Mum, but at what cost? I’ve been trying to write in my journal more and write less about them. I heard someone say on blogging about children ‘those aren’t my stories to tell.’ And that made me pause. I’m trying to move away from writing about my children specifically and more about how motherhood makes me feel, how it changes me, etc x

#thesatsesh I think you can have a happy medium. I don’t put photos of J on any social media / blog. I do write about him but for me personally don’t disclose any embarrassing stories. I think there is a line of comfort and if you have to think about it, you’ve probably stepped over the line. On my personal FB wall, i write the funny things he says at status updates..this means the memories pop up on my wall from years gone by and I know exactly the date / time he said them 🙂 I think the answer is making it work for you and them x There is no right or wrong.

I’ve known about blogging for so long, but never got round to doing it myself until earlier this year when the company I was working with started to make people redundant! Although I was lucky enough not to be one of them, I’m still grateful that that gave me the push. I’m still not one of those mummies who are happily sharing every information of our family life out, but I find blogging a great outlet and am happy to share moments and experiences that are dear to us rather than talking specifically about my child.

I tend to blog less about my girls now than I did. They’re older now and not so keen and I never use their names. That said, both of them are now on social media and that’s a whole other minefield because I have to remind them what to do or not to do. #ablogginggoodtime x

My husband is really against sharing photographs of our children so I have to respect that. He feels that it is unfair that they already have an online presence before they are able to make the decision for themself. I do agree with him, but I also have that typical mum feeling of wanting to share how wonderful my children are with everyone and the world! #ablogginggoodtime

I think about this too sometimes. It’s one of the reasons I don’t actually write as much about them as I could because I am paranoid their photos are going to end up on some perverts computer or on some child pornography site. Yes, I go there. But I also remember that eventually my kids are going to be on social media (not yet thankfully) and I also am determined to not let my fears for my children get the better of me and let my mind wander that far into the darkness that I never come back out. It’s important to be aware of the dangers of the world but not let the fear take hold to the point where we are afraid to live. This would trickle down to our kids and that’s not healthy for anyone. I don’t want my boys to live their lives in fear. I want them to be happy but in order for that to happen, I have to model that in my own life. This is a great topic of conversation though Mac! #ablogginggoodtime

I often wonder how much to share when writing about my daughter. I don’t show her face in pictures and don’t use her name, but I do share anecdotes from our lives. I’m very conscious of not wanting her to have a digital footprint that she didn’t consent to – but I understand that not everyone has the same concerns, and that’s okay. You have to do what you’re comfortable with. #ablogginggoodtime

This is something I think about all the time! It is so hard but I hope that the boys will appreciate that it’s thanks to my writing about them that I am able to stay home with them and not be trotting off to work every day! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

It is SUCH a tough question isn’t it? I ask myself all the time. My kids are on my blog a lot and are really happy to be there……at the moment. I suppose they are from a different generation though and it will be the norm for their peers to all have online profiles from birth. Thanks for linking up to the#bigpinklink this week.

This really struck a chord with me. I struggle with it and then take a break from my blog, only to regret it later because I know I will forget things. My epilepsy guarantees that my memory will just erase special memories. Perhaps I could commit it to paper, but I know deep down that wouldn’t happen. For now I will plod on, as you say perhaps naively, until the point I am asked to no longer. #ablogginggoodtime

I think blogging about them to an extent is good. I am tossing over the idea of scrapping front pictures of Ben as he gets older to protect his identity when he goes to school and even maybe changing his name, but as a parent blogger, it kind of goes with the territory for me! #ablogginggoodtime

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