There’s something exciting about hiding in plain sight

I had a few realisations while I was away. One of them was that I no longer want to live quietly. I love my routines and daily rituals, but I admit I have a tendency to withdraw into myself and become reclusive. I think moving to Vietnam made me lean into that part of myself a little too much. Not having that many friends gave me an excuse to just stay home and avoid socialising. I’ve been too easy on myself and I’m gonna try to be better about holding myself accountable for behaviours that don’t enrich my life. Maybe it’s existential FOMO, but I do think this has been holding me back from fully immersing myself into life here.

I’m gonna try my best to invest more time into new relationships here. Right now I have a handful of friends, most of whom I don’t see very often. I have noticed that on the days I do make an effort to leave the apartment and hang out with people I feel a lot better the next day (minus the requisite hang over, that is).

Ugh, why does making friends in your thirties have to be so dang hard?