A Deeper Pride

Concluding the end of eighth grade rite of passage gave me a deeper meaning to Joseph Chilton Pearce’s perception on “seeing within changes one’s outer vision.” This was a meaningful project because it forced me to think about who I am as a person. Taking the time for reflection, gave me strong insight on my character, heritage and personality, giving me a new outlook on life. For me, this project was important because it allowed time for me to take into consideration not only how I see myself, but also how other people see me. So often how other people see me is based on my outer features. It is rare that these people gain a deeper meaning on my roots, being a half Egyptian white female. I am part of a minority in this homogeneous mountain town, making it difficult for me to open up to my peers about my heritage. One goal I hope to accomplish with my mask is the observer will not only gain a greater understanding of my multiethnic background, but also become familiar with the teenage girl I have become and the interests and hobbies I enjoy.

Being a white female gives me certain privileges rather than growing up as a minority. Not only have I been blessed with many fortunate experiences and material items, but also I have the ability to lead an independent life. If I were to go shopping, I have the option to go alone, knowing that I won’t be harassed or followed. I can go to the store with my family knowing that I have enough money to buy groceries. Discrimination is not an issue I deal with on a daily basis, and I am fortunate to have friends and neighbors that accept me. I feel confident in my being and my place in society.

On the other hand, I have grown up in a society where my Egyptian heritage and Muslim religion are not as accepted because of the Al-Qaeda terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001. My religion and heritage have lumped me into a sort of profile that follows the people allegedly responsible for these horrible acts of terrorism. Therefore, automatically making me part of a target group. People assume that every Muslim or Egyptian was part of the terrorist attack, making us guilty by association. This is unfortunate as Islam preaches peace and tolerance, not violence or hatred.

The divide down the middle of my mask represents the two different sides of me: what people see on the outside, and what I represent on the inside. On the surface people see me as an ordinary white girl who is talkative and athletic, however, inside the mask represents my family heritage and my true personality. It shows a side of me that I was suppressing during my middle school years. I finally realized I couldn’t suppress it because being Egyptian plays a big part in my life.

The stiches on my mask represent the period of my life when I was afraid to be myself and be proud of my background. They are located on the mouth to show how I was afraid to talk about my actual identity. People would ask me what my nationality was and I would not answer. I felt like I was being targeted and would become defensive. After completing my Rites of Passage in eighth grade, I realized it wasn’t something to be ashamed of, and I am very proud to be who I am.

The pyramid on my mask symbolizes my Egyptian heritage. I chose this symbol to represent my heritage because when you think of a pyramid, Egypt is the first thing that comes to mind. Although I am only half Egyptian, my father and grandmother impressed upon me the history of their culture and religion. My interest especially increased when I traveled to Egypt and met several relatives for the first time. It was interesting to learn about their life style in Egypt in comparison to mine. After this trip, I realized how my background made me unique. My pride of being Egyptian was tested when I entered middle school. Other students would make fun of my Muslim background, making it difficult for me to open up to my peers. People often perceive Muslims to be terrorists. As result of this perception, people have poked fun at me. At times, all I wanted to do was hide who I was, which was easy until people saw me with my family. It is clear that I am part of multi-racial family and much different from the average white family. Me being Egyptian is not the first thing to cross someone’s mind since I don’t have an Egyptian first name and I am a white female. People just expect that I’m an ordinary white girl. However, when I’m with my family you can easily tell that my dad is Egyptian. In addition, my sister has an Egyptian name and my brother looks like my dad, tall and tan.

The eyes and eye lashes on my mask represent the female side of me. When you think of a girl you think of dresses, make-up, and skirts, so I decided that eyes and eyelashes would symbolize my femininity best since I prefer to be natural.

Another detail on the left side of my mask will be a collage of things I love to do. I have a lot of interest in both music and sports. In all of these activities I have a different group of friends and role models that I spend time with. These different friend groups are a huge part of my life. I have always been told that when I want to accomplish something, I can. Some of the sports I participate in are physically demanding and tough, for example the freestyle ski team, soccer, and volleyball. Working through difficult situations, and keeping a positive attitude, even when times are tough, makes you a better person. Inner strength is another attribute I have learned through competition. Hard work and commitment along with practice and perfection has helped me shape my inner drive. Sports have given me the ability to endure and collaborate well with others.

My parents have always encouraged me to live life to the fullest, and accept every day’s challenges with a smile and hard work. The sun in my mask represents this philosophy. It also reflects on my personality as bright, outgoing, and creative. The sun takes on many appearances depending on the time of day and month in the year. I feel this represents me, as I engage in many different activities and enjoy a variety of pursuits.

Growing up in Durango, I have come to realize that I have also experienced a privileged life. My parents have worked hard all their lives, and have shared their success with my siblings and me. The silver platter under my mask represents this fact. I am incredibly fortunate to have had this work ethic modeled for me. Getting good grades, being a good citizen, and working to my best potential is what is expected of me.

My mask symbolizes the two parts of my identity, my growth, and my hard work ethic. The experience of creating this mask has given me a deeper outlook on who I am as a person. This project helped remind me that people are not who they may seem on the surface and everyone has a story behind their mask.