Ships and Birds

It was the first poem I had ever written, so it was a lot of emotion wrapped up in a metaphor. The question I was asking (to myself, I guess) was "What is the point of trying so hard if its all going to end up with the same result anyway?"

All this talk of mocking birds, Where are all the doves? When revision becomes complacent And words are not enough.

I can not fathom the fathoms Of the anchor that keeps me sane; But ever so slowly, its been pulling Up on the disintegrating chain.

My voice is hoarse from yelling Out for Noah's dove. My heart is hoarse from yelling Out for the undeniable love.

The love for which these ships Bask in an unfailing sun; Yet mine is going nowhere, And still it is almost done.

The rutter is underperforming, The mask is broken in half. Much like my hopes of returning To where I was resident last.

Pictures in frames that are broken, Cracked from the bitter waves, Prove that at the time of my sinking, I was already perusing the graves.

To my own death I offered friendship, We can only say the refusal was net. Tossed overboard, the water seemed starved, And eyes closed, body shaking wet,

My dove I had long awaited Flew overhead, and if it could talk, It would say, "I tried to war you," Because in the end, all birds mock.

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just kidding. Really it was incredible--I mean I think I liked it so much because it reminds me so much of my style of writing poetry and I think I could really relate to the meaning of it.

That said I only understood half of it, which I think is a sign of it being a great literary masterpiece because it seems that every poem that has a few lines or stanzas that stump people become something that critics and... (more »)

You've written the type of poem that I absolutely adore. I like them longer, rhyming, and so full of emotion that I almost cry. It was brilliant, well worded, and emotional. Your metaphores were wonderful and word play was superb. Excellent, top notch, wonderful.

wow. This is SO great! one of the best. Ever. I can't believe no onehas commented on it yet... odd. I mean it's just so true and right and- gah, words aren't enough. IF only you could type REAL facial expressions. It's AH-MAZING!!!!!