A meditation on scandals

Scandal, scandal, scandal. That one word rolls over and over in my mind so much anymore. At one point in my work here, I found the pressure and stress significant enough that I nearly (emphasis on nearly) abandoned ship. Cynical by nature, I found myself uttering poxes on everyone’s house in private. I trusted Zen teachings but I didn’t know if I could trust Zen teachers. Yes, an all or nothing delusion which I struggle(d) quite a bit with.

As the dust has now settled some, I’ve had a lot of time to consider what happened and why abuse at the hand of a teacher is so damaging on a mahasangha scale. Certainly we may question the motivations of a few who publicly condemned the unsupportable actions of Eido Shimano and Dennis Merzel, or even those who were strangely silent; this questioning, which I find healthy, is actually at the root of why teacher abuses are so destructive. They’ve made it very hard for people to trust ANY Zen teacher. That’s the effect I’ve noticed in me, anyway. And overall that skepticism may even be healthy. But…

If these two teachers, in very different but related incidents, could do this so publically for so many years, then who else is doing it? One teacher in particular assures me that abuses are extraordinarily rare. But how do you believe such a claim when so many failed to use their voice, including this particular teacher, before they’d heard the song on the radio and then became a fan? It’s kind of hard to. Sorry.

You can blame media outlets in this instance but, last I checked? None of the Buddhist publications have an investigative journalism team. Who would even think up such a thing and how would it even operate? That’s probably too far in the OTHER direction. Media outlets can’t just report rumors; you have to be able to put names to this stuff.

You can also blame teachers who never spoke out over the years, or who still refused to speak out when the evidence was so egregious and overwhelming, for the mistrust. One can always just claim ignorance and some may even in fact be ignorant. But then we must ask, “Would I have had the courage?” Would you or I have stuck our own neck on a chopping block? Ideally, you might answer yes. But then, you might have nothing to lose in doing so, either.

Just whose job is it to tackle these issues?

It’s easy to join a movement. It’s tougher to start one. It’s tough to call out a peer, potentially ruining their life in the process. You then weigh that against the harm. Is harm being done here? If the answer is yes, then action really is required. While Zen colleagues of offending teachers are NOT their victims, not directly anyway, a victim mentality might emerge.

“I want to do the right thing, but I have such a good thing going here.”

“I don’t want to be a target, I want community and belonging.”

“I’d rock the boat alone, but I don’t weigh enough.”

There are also loyalties at play, if only implied. When you’ve known someone for a time, when you’ve developed a relationship with them, you rightly see their humanity. They aren’t a stranger anymore. They aren’t a headline. They’re Dennis Merzel. They’re Eido Shimano. When you really see a person, and also when you know your own frailties, you might not be willing to criticize them—certainly not in public.

More “scandals” will come—maybe it will be sexual, maybe financial, or maybe something even worse. I’ve had to really look at the topic because of this (also because human beings are affected). While I won’t shirk away from my responsibility as a publisher, I must admit these experiences have softened me some.

You have to be willing to think anyone can gain insight at any moment, even unethical human beings who someone made teacher. You really must if you yourself are to have any potential for insight. Everyone is wherever it is they are with their own frames of reference while there.

I don’t know about you but, I find that I am constantly revising my understanding of this thing we call existence. I could literally see it this way one minute, and see it entirely another in the next, due to the nature and complexity of what it means to have a mind and to live. Hell, every revision or new glimpse happens in an instant. That isn’t indecision.

About Adam Kō Shin Tebbe

Adam Kō Shin Tebbe (Kō Shin meaning Shining Heart) is editor at Sweeping Zen and is a blogger for Huffington Post's Religion section, writing mainly on topics of interest to Zen practitioners. Before starting the website in 2009, Adam trained to be a chemical dependency counselor. Adam is currently working on a documentary on Zen in North America (titled Zen in America) with a projected release date of 2017.

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