just go away and disappear from my life

I think about killing myself a lot. Lately it seems to consume my mind. But I want to live, I want to experience so much. So maybe I don’t wanna die. I just wanna disappear and go away from everyone and everything. I just wanna vanish.

The winner of a poll I made a couple days ago, won by four votes! Overwatch men and Overwatch women will have two separate posts as to not continue my string of long-ass posts. <D

This subject is kind of near and dear to my heart, especially recently, and I can’t say that I’m not happy that y’all voted it first.

Thanks everyone for voting, stay sweet, and I hope you enjoy the headcanons!

~~~

Genji

The topic slipped out while the both of you were relaxing one evening

You had been complaining about you day and how stressed you were, while your boyfriend rubbed your shoulders and listened with open ears

And the words had just slipped out, “Sometimes I wish I could just run away from everything”

Your boy was shook

Boy did he know what that feeling was like, wanting to run and hide away from the rest of the world

Of course, he also knew what it was like to actually succeed with that plan and knew just how tough it was

So he questions you for you to confirm your intentions

“(Y/N), was that a serious thought or did you just say it to say it?”

“I mean… Sometimes it’s a serious thought. That doesn’t mean I want to leave you, of course. It’s just the work and the constant war, and the chaos, and the stress.. Sometimes running away sounds like the most amazing paradise I could hope for.”

Then you can’t help but add, “Aside from being alone with you and snuggling all night long.”

The attempt at lightening the mood was noted by a soft smile that briefly appeared across Genji’s features but quite brief it was

Genji wanted nothing more for you to be happy and if that meant going your way, that was that

However, you didn’t have to go as far as you might have thought

“What if you traveled with Zenyatta for a while?”

Your curious gaze encouraged his explanation

“He’s a traveling monk, a guru. He avoids danger and conflict unless there’s no other way, the traveling is worldwide and always peaceful. Your stress would wane away, the chaos would be removed, you’d have a friend–a peaceful one–to after you, and I could keep in touch; I could visit even.”

You get teary eyed because he’s doing the exact opposite of what you thought he would do

Not only is he not trying to make you stay, he’s helping you figure out options

You hug him tight and bury your face in his neck

He hugs you right back

“Whatever will make you happy, I will try to you with it.”

“Genji, thank you…”

Hanzo

Before suggesting any alternatives, he’d do everything in his power to attempt to keep you from leaving

You want people gone? Done. You want a promotion/demotion? He’ll make it happen. You want a different job? He can find you a better one.

Vacations, trips, pampering, protection, he tries everything he can

But sometimes things just need to happen

“Hanzo, I know you’re trying but I think this is something I need to do.”

“I can make you disappear.”

Wat

Hanzo, e x p l a i n

“I mean, I can make you disappear for as long as you want. I have some ties with old family friends. You can get taken off the radar for as long as you wish. Live in a nice, secluded place. You’ll be protected and you don’t have to deal with the wars and the stress. Only my people and I will know where you are; you have my word.

“Just… Please don’t leave me.”

The poor boy’s still heartbroken about the whole ordeal, that your life has gotten so bad to the point that you feel like disappearing from society for a while

But, like I said, he’s going to do everything in his power

McCree

He understands right off the bat

Hell, he’s had his fair share of running off by himself for a while just to get away from it all

He’s really just kind of a lone ranger himself

Like hell he’ll let you go alone though

“Fine, let’s do it.”

You look at him, confused

“What?”

“Let’s do it. Run away together. Get away from all the craziness. We can get a ranch and live there for a while. As soon as you decide you want back in, we’ll do it.”

You try to protest that he has a life he needs to continue with but he stops you before you can

“We all need a break from life sometime.”

Then he starts packing and research

Zenyatta

He’s probably the second most understand person behind Genji in this type of situation

You don’t travel with him during his journeys; you work away at an irritating job at home while waiting for your omnic partner to return

So

Why not turn the situation on its head and do travel with him?

Or he can suggest to you a cozy, pleasant monastery of sorts for you to visit for a while

Or he can take you to a calm little place in Nepal where you can hide away to your heart’s content

He offers several different options for you to pick from, although he makes it clear that he’d prefer you travel with him over the others

Of course, it’s your decision and he respects you either way

If you choose to stay somewhere else, he offers to visit you as long as you’re comfortable with it

If he’s part of the life you want to distance yourself from, he’ll accept that as well; however, he’ll always keep a close watch over you to make sure that you’re in no danger and that you’re happy and healthy

Reaper

To be honest, he’s relieved that you want to run away

Not because he wants you to leave or because he loves you any less

But because he knows that he can’t hurt you in anyway if you’re gone

He helps you pack and assures your safety via Talon guards but you’re on your own when it comes to deciding where you want to go and how you want to live

Is it his best judgement? Absolutely not. But he doesn’t see it as pushing you away so much as protecting you from him.

After you leave, the nightmares and pain come back

He cries at night because your gone

He only gets your whereabouts a while after you’ve left to check in on you from a distance without your knowledge

You being protected means being protected from him as well

Reinhardt

He gets teary when you tell him your intentions

He offers you a deal to try and fix things: Give him a week to come up with some sort of plan; if he can’t by the time the limit’s up, you get to leave and he won’t stop you

He absolutely desperate for this to work

He runs around everywhere, researching, asking others for ideas

Sure, he’s been left before but this was you leaving, completely detaching yourself from your old life for who knows how long

At the end of the time, he (weak) plan is to relocate to remote Germany for a few months or so

He’ll take care of work and protection, and you get to do whatever you please

It’s not ideal, this is true

But hell, the puppy-man is trying so hard

It’s worth a shot, right?

The old boy actually breaks down crying when you say you’ll take his deal

He’s so happy

Picks you up and spins you around

Just don’t leave him, okay?

Soldier 76

He’s pretty accepting about the entire thing

He wants to run away sometimes too, so it’s a fair thought in his book

But he doesn’t want you remaking your life from absolute scratch

He has a farmhouse he inherited from his parents when he was younger

No one knows about it but him and the people of the small peaceful town it’s in

So it would be running away from everything but not starting completely over

He’d buy you the first set of groceries and even help you unpack

He’d visit every other weekend or so, periodically but not common enough to draw questioning eyes to your location

It’s a perfect plan in his book

And he’s also just mildly excited for you to meet the people of his birthplace

Roadhog

He’s not letting you run away

One, because it’s not healthy

Two, because he’d much rather change your surroundings to better suit you

This means getting rid of people and moving the literal earth if need be

Seriously

He’s the one-man apocalypse for a reason

And you’re his little piggy

He’s ready to kick ass and take names

You’re not running away though

Instead he makes up a binge-eating date that revolves around you spilling everything that’s ever made you want to run away

And him taking notes on who and what needs to be eliminated

Junkrat

This man is a child, okay

He’s like a kicked puppy

He gets all clingy and whimpery

“W-well, Shiela, just tell me what I have to do to make ye stay! Is it the people? I can take care of the people! Or we can move! Just.. just don’t me..”

Like Roadhog, he’s ready to remove toxic people and blow up things on your command

Probably with the help of Roadhog himself

Roadhog thinks it’s unhealthy for Junkrat this time but this time it’s not his call so he’ll help if he can instead

Get ready for the dynamic duo hookin’ ‘em and cookin’ ‘em just for you

He’ll even teach you some skills to take care of people yourself

Lucio

Okay, he might be the most chill person about the situation

All he asks is for you to clarify whether or not you’ll still be together and confirms that he gets to know where you’re going

After that, all he asks for is period video chats/video dates after you get settled down where you want to be

That’s pretty much it

He’ll buy you your plane tickets and help you pay your new rent if need be

Of course, if things don’t go well, he’s going to hunt you down and bring you home to live with him and you’ll figure out things from there

“I’m sorry for everything.”“Am I out of touch?”“I’m going to mess this up.”“This is just my luck…”“From the second that I was born it seems I had a loaded gun…”“In the meantime we let it go.”“Who can you trust?”“Show me a sign…”“Take me away,”“But I wanted the pain to disappear.”“I’m so sorry.”“Life isn’t always what you think it’d be.”“I know that I did you wrong,”“But will you trust me when I say that I’ll make it up to you somehow?”“I know I let you down, didn’t I?”“I gave you hell through all the years.”“I bet my life on you.”“Please forgive me for all I’ve done…”“Don’t tell me to be strong.”“Oh everything’s a mess…”“Leave me to dream.”“Oh quiet down, I’ve had enough!”“I guess it’s now or never.”“Maybe you could save my soul.”“If only for a second, let me have you.”
“Tell me all your secrets, let me know you.”“Things will change with time.”“It’s not a picture perfect life.”“Maybe I’m broken…”“When everything comes crashing down, you’re all I know.”“It all begins with a look in the eyes.”“I wish I had a lifetime to capture every moment of you…”“I’m a sensitive mess.”“You’re a beautiful girl.”“Let all whispers die.”“Always be careful.”“Just wanna live my life…”“What you see is what you get.”
“Stop trying to be somebody else…”“Welcome to the new age…”

Music Series: All Too Well by Taylor Swift (sequel to The Moment I Knew)

Oy….

I’m sorry…I’m sure she’s nice, probably…talented songwriter, I think…and I’m all about writing what you know, your own experiences. I incorporate my personal experiences into my writing every day. It’s a part of you that hopefully people can relate to. I don’t like saying negative things about anyone, it’s not how I was raised…but…holy hell…

She just reminds me of that person that is talking to you…and talking…and talking…and you’re just nodding your head over and over and over, saying nothing in return, because you don’t think they are really interested in a response from you anyway, you don’t much care, you’re not really interested, and they’re boring the shit out of you. But I’m sure she’s nice…probably…

So here you go. A sequel to The Moment I Knew. You asked, I’ve given. Not a perfect representation of the lyrics, but I don’t have time to write a novel. This is “All Too Well” by Taylor Swift, which again, you will find NOWHERE on my Spotify playlists, but you can still listen to at this link. Again, I did not listen to the song before posting, never heard it before that I can recall, so I hope the lyrics are correct…all of them…all 5,000 of them… Losing followers? Gaining?

xo

Shelli

********************

I walked through the door with you, the air was cold,

But something ‘bout it felt like home somehow.

And I left my scarf there at your sister’s house,

And you’ve still got it in your drawer even now.

Oh, your sweet disposition and my wide-eyed gaze.

We’re singing in the car, getting lost Upstate.

Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place,

And I can picture it after all these days.

You sat on the plane, looking out your window, quietly wiping a tear from your eye.

You wondered if Harry knew yet. Had he finally arrived after the party was over? Not likely. But it was a new day there now, and you were far away, wanting to leave every reminder of Christmas, your birthday, and the bitter cold of winter far behind you.

As you stepped out of the plane, smelling the fresh scent of the sea blowing in the warm breeze, you try to smile, but you know healing from a broken heart will take time. Harry was the only man you have truly ever loved…and you left him. It was the hardest thing you’ve ever done, but feeling like he had inadvertently already left you months before, you made the nearly impossible decision to breakup.

And I know it’s long gone,

And that magic’s not here no more,

And I might be okay,

But I’m not fine at all.

'Cause there we are again on that little town street.

You almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me.

Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well.

You walk through the door of the little beach house you had rented, closing it behind you and looking around. Lonely. It was all you had expected, but lonely.

As you walk to the sliding glass doors that lead out to the deck and a picturesque view of the beach and sea, you remember the last beach holiday you were on. Harry had surprised you with it and you both had the best time together. It was your first trip together as a couple. It was a turning point in your relationship and meant a lot to both of you. It was the first time Harry told you he was in love with you.

Years passed…bittersweet…

Photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turning red.

You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin sized bed

And your mother’s telling stories about you on a tee ball team

You taught me 'bout your past, thinking your future was me.

And I know it’s long gone, and there was nothing else I could do

And I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to…

'Cause there we are again in the middle of the night.

We’re dancing around the kitchen in the refrigerator light

Down the stairs, I was there, I remember it all too well, yeah.

Sleep was not happening. As the old radio alarm clock on the bedside table flashed “3:14 a.m.”, you finally got out of bed and walked to the dark, tiny kitchen, looking in the fridge for anything that sounded good but finding nothing. Beginning to close the fridge door, your mind flashes to an earlier time, when you found Harry standing in front of the refrigerator in the middle of the night, the light from the tiny bulb shining on him like the rays from the sun. You sneaked up on him, causing him to bump his head against the machine, you apologizing relentlessly as he assured you with kisses and hugs that he was fine. Hugs and kisses and sweet nothings in your ear had slowly turned into Harry humming lightly, as you both swayed together in the light of that fridge, ending in a very intimate night.

But reality as it was, you look at the few items on the shelf of the little beach house fridge, a few things you had purchased at a roadside market on your way there, then slowly shut the door to the fridge and the memory. You knew Harry knew by now from the numerous texts and missed calls your phone had been receiving. Each more heart-wrenching than the one before, you had finally tucked your phone away under one of the bed pillows, not wanting to hear the vibration anymore.

What had happened? How had such a beautiful relationship come to such a sad end? You felt you would never be able to stop loving Harry, and that’s why you chose to leave. You never doubted his love for you. But how much were you supposed to accept and look past? For months he had spent more time away from you, making excuses and breaking promises, than you could understand. It wasn’t about his career. You always understood his career being time-consuming and busy. It was so much more than that. You knew eventually you would have to face him, but you just couldn’t…not yet. You needed time…to think…to sort out the confusion and sadness in your mind…to get over him and try to move on.

Well, maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much,

But maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up.

Running scared, I was there, I remember it all too well.

Hey, you call me up again just to break me like a promise.

So casually cruel in the name of being honest.

I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here

'Cause I remember it all, all, all… too well.

Time won’t fly, it’s like I’m paralyzed by it

I’d like to be my old self again, but I’m still trying to find it

After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own

Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone

You sat in the lounger of the deck of the beach house, looking out at the sea. You think of that feeling you sometimes had as a kid when you would float in water…the quiet sound of the water filling your ears, your body resting lightly at the surface, eyes closed, shutting out the rest of the world in that moment. Sometimes you wished you could find that place in your life, shutting out the noise and clutter and sadness and just enjoy the peace. But that wasn’t reality, at least not right now.

As the sun was setting, you took a deep breath and closed your eyes, trying to shut out the thoughts that were taking over your mind, causing the slightly-nauseating flips in your stomach. You thought how easily it would be to stay in that moment, away from everyone else in your life, just disappearing and starting a new life…somewhere. But your thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a voice cutting through the deepening darkness.

“Hello, love,” you hear Harry say, gently, a sound of relief in his voice.

You look at him, standing next to the deck railing and slowly approaching you, afraid you’ll run if he nears you too quickly. How had he found you? Why was he there? You start to get up as he walks closer.

“Please, don’t go. Talk to me, baby, please,” he begs.

But you keep my old scarf from that very first week

'Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me

You can’t get rid of it 'cause you remember it all too well, yeah

'Cause there we are again, when I loved you so

Back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known

It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

Wind in my hair, you were there, you remember it all

Down the stairs, you were there, you remember it all

It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

You nod, turning in your chair, seeing the sadness and desperation in his face. You knew he had to have gone through a lot to find you. You missed him, you had to admit to yourself. You were as curious as he was to see where a conversation would take you both.

“I’m so sorry,” he starts. “I know I hurt you, and I’m sorry. I’ve not been around for you like before. Not been much of a boyfriend lately. I missed your birthday, your big party, and I feel like a complete ass. I’ve said things and not followed through with them. I made other things more important than our relationship, and I shouldn’t have, I’m so sorry. You deserve better than me for a boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean I want you to walk out of my life. I love you, please let me prove to you that I’m here.”

“Please, don’t,” Harry sniffs. “Don’t shut me out. I’ve been searching for days for you. Had to hire someone to help me find you. I’ve been on three planes in the past 36 hours and have had no sleep since I walked up to your house and read the letter on your door. I’m not saying I don’t deserve this, love. But I’m begging you to not shut me out. I want to show you I’m here for you…for us!”

“Harry, I can’t do this anymore,” you say, wiping a tear as your words nearly choke you. “I need someone in my life who is around for me, that I don’t worry about leaving me alone! Someone I can depend on, who puts me first, and.… This is more than just…missing my birthday, and not showing for my party. It’s much more than that.”

Harry, begins to speak as you quickly stand, moving toward the sliding doors, until Harry darts between you and the doors, his hands grasping your arms tightly.

“I’m sorry!” he pleads, his voice shaking. “Baby, I know I don’t deserve another chance with you, but please don’t do this!” You see the tears pooling in his eyes and hear the fear in his voice. “What can I say or do to make you give me another chance?” he asks desperately.

“He’s bad for you Y/N.” My father warns, he’s always be strict about who I date but this is over the top, he was acting crazy and I didn’t like it

“Daddy please! I love him.” My voice comes out shaky and weak, I was telling the truth. I was in love with Shawn Mendes.

He lived down the street, got up to no good as my father would say, But he didn’t know Shawn like I did, he was kind and caring, passionate and loving. He had his Badboy facade, but only to please his friends. Shawn wasn’t a bad person. My father just couldn’t see it.

“enough Y/n! You do not love that boy, I won’t let you Become a whore! He’s no good.”
I felt like screaming, crying. Pulling a fit. Anything that would make my father listen.

Shawn and I have been seeing each other for 5 months, it’s been the best 5 months of my entire life. I’ve learned how to let loose more. I’m not the stuck up rich girl I once was. Shawn was changing me, in a good way. But my father didn’t like that, my father found him in my bed and went ballistic. Shawn found it hilarious. The truth is I’ve been with other boys, but when Shawn and I make love it’s different, there’s so much meaning behind it, passion.

I’m 18, old enough to make my own decisions. I knew what I was getting into, Shawn’s reputation wasn’t good. People talked, He was Always the talk of the town. He didn’t mind, infact he liked the attention, The way people spoke his name as if it was their first language.

He was rough with others, Anyone who dared go up against him would be making a Huge mistake. But with me he was never anything less than a gentleman, His bad reputation suddenly disappeared around me and he was just Shawn. The boy I was in love with. My father was a respectable man, wealthy and rich. He wanted me to marry a doctor, or a laywer. Anyone other than Shawn. Father said he was a no good, that he would waste his life away.

Shawn knew my father despised him, but that never stopped him from sneaking around just to be with me, father would never understand how Kind and gentle Shawn was once you Got to know him. Once you broke down his walls.

I didn’t mind being called a whore, A slut, a waste. After all people talk, and talk is cheap. Shawn is the only one that matters, everyone else can go to hell. I don’t care if he’s bad for me. I love him, I’m not daddy’s little girl anymore

Requested by an Anon: An imagine where reader is Chib’s daughter and Juice’s o'lady. The reader distanced herself because she feels like no one wants her around so she disappears for 6 months. Juice goes crazy looking for her and when he does he tries bringing her back home. Juice stays with reader until she changes her mind and goes back to Charming with Juice.

AN: I changed it just a little bit, I hope you like it. Sorry it’s so long, it got away from me.

You sighed, clearly showing your annoyance. “For the tenth time, it’s Wonwoo. Now please, don’t ask him when he comes. You’re just going to look bad.”

Seokmin gasped dramatically. “I’m sorry!” he exclaimed sarcastically, “This ‘Wonwoo’ guy has to work hard not to look bad. I don’t. I’m the judge here.”

You squeezed his shoulder affectionately. “Yes, I know. But you’ll like him, really! He’s such a sweet guy, Seokmin! And I’ve known him for years!”

The doorbell rang just then, indicating that your awaited guest has just arrived. You smiled at your brother and hurried to answer it. Once you swung the door open, you were greeted by the lovely sight of your boyfriend, Wonwoo, dressed in jeans and a nice shirt and holding a beautiful bouquet. With a warm smile, he pressed the flowers into your hand and pecked your cheek.

“Come in, come in! Seokmin is dying to meet you!”

Off in the house you heard a snort.

Rolling your eyes, you closed the door behind Wonwoo and led him to the kitchen. Upon entering, you noticed how Seokmin’s eyes narrowed when he saw the two of you holding hands. Besides that, he smiled at the intruder guest.

“Seokmin, this is Wonwoo,” you started, “Wonwoo, this is my older brother, Seokmin.” Wonwoo instantly shot out his hand to shake Seokmin’s, but he just got a suspicious glance in return. He quickly retracted his hand and gave a small bow instead.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Wonwoo said politely.

“Yeah,” Seokmin replied shortly. The tension in the room was growing quickly, so you decided to end the conversation before it turned for the worse.

“Say, Wonwoo, why don’t we watch some TV? Maybe there’ll be a movie on or something,” you suggested.

Wonwoo nodded and went to the living room.

“Why are you dating him?” Seokmin whispered urgently as soon as Wonwoo was out of hearing range. “He’s so scary!”

You crossed your arms and clicked your tongue. “I’m sorry! But Wonwoo is a really nice guy and you have to work hard to act better in front of him!” With a huff, you walked out of the kitchen to join your boyfriend.

—-

2nd month

Visits from Wonwoo became pretty often then, much to Seokmin’s dismay. The two of you were sitting on couch in comfortable silence, the TV droning on about a vacuum that specifically picked up animal hair. It was cozy, sitting side by side, Wonwoo’s hand on your left thigh. It was warm, and it made you feel safe and loved.

“Have I told you how pretty you are?” Wonwoo said suddenly, turning his head to look at you.

You smiled at him and squeezed the hand on your thigh. “Only everyday. It’s nice, though. Makes me feel special.”

“Good.” Wonwoo’s face came closer and it seemed like you two were about to kiss. His lips barely brushed against yours when-

“Heeeyyy! You two take up so much space, make some room, please!” Seokmin smushed himself between you and Wonwoo, awkwardly sitting on your thighs and Wonwoo’s hand. “Another commercial? Really? I want to see some more wedding dresses! They all look so pretty!”

Your eye twitched. If only there was some type of weapon laying around… With Wonwoo’s regular visits, Seokmin getting in between the two of you also became an everyday thing. Yes, you loved your brother dearly, but this was too much. Glancing over to Wonwoo, you also noticed how he looked extremely annoyed as well.

“Isn’t this nice?” Seokmin spoke up again. “All three of us spending quality time together? And this couch is so comfy! I really like suede. What about you, Wonton?”

You silently prayed for a hole to randomly appear in the floor and swallow you up. Or better yet, swallow Seokmin. ‘Someone strike me now,’ you pleaded in your brain.

At least Seokmin was having fun watching Say Yes to the Dress.

—-

6th month

Soft. His lips were so, so soft. His taste was addictive, his scent intoxicating. One hand was in your hair, gripping slightly, while the other held onto your waist. You pulled him into you, wanting more and more.

“Wonwoo,” you murmured against his lips, causing him to groan quietly in his throat. The kisses were slow, but by God they were passionate. His body, pressed against yours, was so warm and inviting and just so ugh. Words couldn’t describe how perfect this moment was.

A smack sounded at your bedroom window, but neither of you paid mind to it. Another one came, this time louder. You broke away from the heated session, looking over your shoulder to see what the commotion was.

You screamed.

Seokmin, sitting on a tree branch, had his hands pressed against the window and a very serious look on his face.

“HELLO FROM THE OTHER SIIIIIIDDDDDEEEE~~~”

“OH MY GOD, SEOKMIN! GO AWAY OR I’LL CALL MOM!”

Seokmin disappeared from sight, scrambling down the tree to possibly save his life.

—-

8th month

“Oh, wow, Wonwoo. This skirt looks great,” you say into your mirror, flashing a smile and twirling around. The lacy material was flowy and soft, and it accented your hips and waist perfectly. “And it fits so nicely! I think Seokmin will really like it.”

Wonwoo smiled. “I was hoping you would like it,” he said as he stood up from your bed and came behind you. He placed his hands on your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder. “You look beautiful,” he murmured, kissing your neck softly.

The atmosphere was pleasant and peaceful, making you sigh in content. “I feel like the luckiest girl alive, really.”

Wonwoo hugged you from behind and met your eyes in the mirror. “And I know for a fact that I’m the luckiest man alive.”

Seokmin immediately felt guilty and a pang of sadness stabbed him in the heart. Though, he remained silent.

“Are you that jealous of Wonwoo? He’s a great guy, Seokmin! He got this skirt because he thought of me! And you know what, that was really sweet of him!” You shook your head. “I can’t believe you. I thought you would really like him.”

Seokmin glanced over at Wonwoo, though he looked very awkward and not really sure of what to do in this kind of situation. It would be a lie if Seokmin said he didn’t feel the same.

“Why can’t you be happy for me?” you whispered.

“I am,” Seokmin replied after a few moments worth of silence. “I just… don’t want you to get hurt. Or pregnant, for that matter. I don’t know what you two do upstairs-”

“Seokmin,” Wonwoo interrupted, “it’s not like that. I wouldn’t do that to (y/n). Not until we’re completely comfortable with it. And that includes you. I get it. You’re protective of your little sister, and I would be the same. I got to say, I can respect you for that. Not many guys stick up for their sister like that all of the time. You’re a cool guy and I respect you greatly.”

Seokmin stared at Wonwoo like he just grew a second head. It became so quiet that you even began second guessing your hearing. Then, after much silence, Seokmin decided to speak.

“That was so nice,” he said as he sucked in a breath. He placed a hand to his heart and let out all the air. “I’m sorry. My behavior was horrible. I’m just worried about (y/n), you know? I didn’t mean to get too out of hand. I hope you can forgive me.” Seokmin stood up from his seat and bowed to Wonwoo.

You gave Wonwoo a starstruck face and he simply smiled. “I do. And I promise to look after her so you don’t have to all the time, okay?”

“What about the baby?”

Now you looked to Seokmin, clearly confused. “What?”

“If he’s going to look after you, what about your child?”

“Excuse me?”

“I want to be an uncle, (y/n)! When will the baby making process start?”

Your jaw dropped.

“When the skirt comes off,” Wonwoo said nonchalantly.

“WHAT? WONWOO, NO! DON’T GIVE IN TO HIM!”

“Will I have to leave the house or will you two go somewhere else?”

“WHY SEOKMIN, WHY-”

“We can go. Make it seem like less of a hassle, you know?”

“WONWOO, SHUT UP-”

“Yay, babies!”

“I agree. I think our child would be so cute. What do you think, (y/n)?”

“I SERIOUSLY HATE YOU BOTH.”

~Ash

P.S. I really hope you guys like this! This was super fun and I look forward to doing more!

“You look great, Harry” I smiled, fixing his tie so it could fall perfectly against his chest. As my hands smoothed out the fabric, I let my mind wander away. I couldn’t imagine how I would be knowing Harry has made a commitment to be with somebody who isn’t me forever. Just him being engaged was enough to make me cry myself to sleep some nights, asking why it couldn’t be me. Why it never could be me.
It’s like a fire in your chest that keeps burning you, telling you that you’ll never be good enough. It’s a sting in your heart that makes you realize that the person you would die for wouldn’t even think about saving you. You’re just the person that’s there, the person that they would go to when they don’t have anybody else.
“Y/n? Are you alright?” Harry giggled, bringing me out of my trance, “You’ve been staring at my tie for ten minutes”.
My cheeks flushed red as I looked down, taking my hands away from the smooth fabric while mumbling a quiet “sorry”, backing away so he can see the final look.
All the guys walked to the other side of him, catching his reaction at the man he will soon be becoming. I couldn’t bring myself to catch his reaction, knowing that the happiness that will appear on his face won’t be because of me.
“Wow” Harry breathed, running his fingertips lightly over the tie, “I’m getting married. Guys, I’m getting married!” Harry smiled, running his long fingers through his hair.
Louis went to hug him, giving him a small squeeze, his was to congratulate him. I’ve never seen the boys so excited for him, and it crushed me to know that I couldn’t even act happy for him like that. I always try to hide myself, trying to escape telling him how “happy” I was.
My eyes became glossy as I took a quick glance at Liam. He was looking at me with the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen in my life. He had looked at me as if I had been lost and sick for months, and had no hope of ever finding my way back home.
Liam knew how madly in love I was with Harry. Liam was the only one who knew, in fact, and I wasn’t the one who had told him. Liam somehow had figured out my secret love for Harry. It was strange, knowing that one of Harry’s “brothers” knew that I, his best friend, had this huge and undoubtable love for him, but as time went on, Liam actually helped me with my problems with Harry and his fiancè Lorie, and I couldn’t thank him enough.
“I just can’t believe that in one month, I’ll be having the wife of my dreams. In one month I’ll be making a commitment to stay with her forever. Gosh, guys, I always thought that this happiness was fake, but she made it real. My gosh, I just can’t believe I’m marrying her” Harry breathed, showing off the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on him—a smile I could never cause.
I felt a tear run down my face, and I quickly wipped it away, hoping none of the boys have seen it.
“Y/n? What’s wrong, love?” Harry asked, taking short strides toward me.
I took a quick look at Liam, who nudged his head foward, giving me a symbol to tell him what was on my mind. I should tell him him. I should just let everything out now before it was too late, before Harry is too out of reach for me to grab onto, but I can’t, I can’t take away that precious smile he was wearing. I could never see him unhappy, I had to lie to him.
“I’m just—” I paused, taking a deep breath to collect myself, putting on a small smile to make it look like I truly ment was I was saying, “I’m just so happy for you, Harry. Growing up with you and all, I just can’t believe you had found somebody you really love. I’m so happy for you”.
Harry’s lips quivered as he smiled big, wrapping his large arms around me, giving me a strong hug, a hug that made me feel so secure, I was dreading the moment he will let go of me.
“Don’t lie, y/n” I heard a faint voice say. Harry’s head snapped up, making my body freeze completely. All the boys were looking curiously at Liam, as if they didn’t understand why he would say something like that.
I felt my heart pound and my hands start to sweat, knowing that Liam wasn’t going to end this without the truth being said.
“You love him, y/n, you can’t be happy for him. You can’t be happy at all, knowing that the love of your life is getting married. You have to go to sleep every night and cry out all that love for him because you can’t have him. You have to be there for him every god damn day, and all of your patience and all of your carefulness is being ignored. You have to compare every guy you meet to him because you want Harry. You want him and you know it. You’ve wanted him since you were fourteen, and now you have to lie? No. I’m not letting you walk around as if you didn’t have a soul anymore, y/n. Don’t prentend like you want this to happen for him”.
I let out a loud sob, making me cover my mouth in attempt to quiet myself down, but it didn’t work. I continued to sob, choking out a quiet “why would you”.
I quickly started to run away, but a large hand took ahold of mine. His thumb ran over my wrist, where old scars that had been there from when I felt like I could never be good enough for anything. Harry knew how sensitive I was about myself. I’d always say that nobody will ever love me, and he knew the now faded scars were there for that reason.
“Y/n” Harry whispered, trying to stop me from leaving.
“Let me go!” I sobbed, ripping my hand away from his and started running. Running so fast so that I could just disappear. Disappear forever.

- Day of the Wedding -

I threw on my dark purple dress. It was knee length, and wrapped perfectly around my body. My hair was in soft curls and my makeup was done nicely. I threw on a black pair of heals, and looked at myself in the mirror.
Even though Harry and I haven’t spoken since the fitting, I can’t just miss out on the biggest day of his life. This is his wedding, and if I truly loved him, I would support him every step of the way.
“Wow, I really like that dress on you” someone said through th doorway.
Liam and his fiancè stood there, with a small smile on his face, holding her hand tightly.
“Thanks” I said, giving a small smile. Liam was still the one there for me whenever I needed somebody. My views on life had gotten worse everyday, but Liam was always there to help me.
“Shall we go?” I asked, grabbing my clutch off of my bed and quickly walking passed him.
“You don’t have to do this” He mumbled, making me stop in my tracks. Tears piled in my eyes, but I shook them away. I have no reason to cry, because this is the happiest moment Harry could ever expierence, and I loved seeing that smile on his face.
“I want to. He’s my best friend. I’ll always be there for him” I comfirmed, making my way slowly to the car.
The car ride was silent, and I could tell nobody really knew what to say anymore. One wrong thing and I could break, and it was such a risk to even bring me to the church in the first place. I can’t picture him taking her hands, vowing to her that he will always love her with as much love as he can carry. Helping her when she’s sick, holding her when she’s sad, singing to her when she’s scared. I can’t picture the gold ring being slipped onto her finger as they kiss the first kiss of their marriage—I just couldn’t. It was too much, too much for me to handle.
Once we arrived at the church, Liam and his fiancè made their way out of the car. Liam looked behind his shoulder, checking on me to see if I was okay, but my body didn’t flinch. I couldn’t do anything. Breathing was difficult, and moving had seemed impossible. I started crying hyserically, hitting my forehead against the seat in front of me, hoping I’d smack some sense into me.
Why did I let myself fall for him? Why did I have to be so stupid?
I continued crying loudly, feeling as if it was the only thing I could do. My body was reacting to every thought about their future, and it seemed to be the worst reaction to anything I’ve experienced before.
There is so much pain. So much pain in my heart to move on. So much pain in the way I think that living seems so physically painful to me. How am I supposed to live without him? How am I supposed to live at all?
“I can’t do it”.
My head snapped up, looking through the open door, making my gaze meet a distraut Harry. His hair was a mess, his eyes were sad, and his tux was on on body, but he looked like he didn’t put any effort in himself at all.
“Harry, please fix yourself” I sighed, turning my body around to face him and bringing my arms up to his shirt, buttoning it up more.
“Y/n! Stop!” Harry yelled, pushing my arms away from him. My heart dropped as the realization hit me like a ton of bricks. He’s mad at me, and there’s nothing I can do about it. Not now, not ever.
“I’ve been having doubts! I’ve been sitting in mine and Lorie’s bedroom all this time wondering if me and her getting married is even a good idea! And I never asked it! It never crossed my mind before Liam had to fucking call you out in front of the whole shop! You made me go through so much stress! You should have told me the second you felt things for me, and you know that! You’ve been ruining this for me!”
“Harry, please, I—”
“And yet I still want you!” he yelled, throwing himself against me as his lips landed perfectly on mine. My back hit softly on the seats, his chest laying perfectly against mine. My heart jumped out of my chest and I felt myself feeling happier than I ever have been, feeling his lips sync with mine, and feeling his fingertips dance along my waist, but I knew this wasn’t right. I’m not this kind of person, and I can’t make Lorie find out about this.
“Harry, this is out of pitty. Harry, Marry her” I whispered.
“Shut up. Just shut up. It’s you. You. I want you. Nobody else. Absolutely nobody. I was just so stupid to even realize what was in front of me. I never looked straight ahead. I always just looked around, and it made me so blind, y/n, because the way I felt just now, kissing you like that, made me feel like I could never die. I felt so infinite, y/n. I was just so blind. So damn blind” he mumbled again, kissing me, the way I had always pictured it.
His lips detatched from mine, running his thumb over my now swollen lips. He looked at them, so confused and hurtful, making everything come to a hault.
“How did I live so long without loving you like this?”

To celebrate Supernatural’s 15th season, the producers have decided to hold a contest to cast an unknown in a recurring role as Sam’s rumored love interest. They are doing open casting calls all over the country. Your best friend Nikki wants to go and she drags you along.

A/N: This is my first attempt at writing about Jared and Jensen and the show. Please be gentle as I am a delicate flower LOL. For the purposes of this story, Jared and Misha are both divorced. No hate please! I’m sure Gen and Vicki are lovely!

After I left Jared’s trailer, I found my way to Lou, the stunt coordinator. He wanted to run through the stuff for what we were filming today. It wasn’t anything complicated, so I felt like I could handle it.

“Ok Y/N, so the scene starts with you fighting a vamp. Your gonna be carrying a machete. There’s some on the table here. Try them out. Pick one that doesn’t feel too heavy to you.”

I found a machete that I liked, and we practiced with it. The stunt guy who was playing the vamp went through the next sequence with me. I charged at him and he got both arms around me and I dropped the machete. He had me trapped, and made as if he was going to bite me, but at the last second I kicked out behind me hard and he let go and I spun away from him.

“Perfect!” Lou said. “Nicely done. You move well.”

“I did gymnastics until I got too tall.” I explained.

Emily showed up a few minutes later to take me to my shooting lesson. I learned how to load a gun, and practiced shooting. It was harder than it looked. My hand was shaking with fatigue by the time we were done. The kickback was much more than I expected.

“So I guess a career as a sniper is off the table?” I joked.

Mark the gun guy was very patient and understanding. “Jared and Jensen have been shooting guns for 15 years now. This is your first time. You’ll get the hang of it. We will practice every day you are on set.”

Emily looked at her watch. “Crap we gotta go! They are ready for you in hair and makeup.”

It didn’t take long for the hair and makeup girls to work their magic and turn me into Gemini Jones, my new alter ego. I went to my trailer and put on my clothes, and I was ready to head to set.

thought a lot today about how growing up online fucked me up severely and fucked up my understanding of community and relationship-building and fucked up my understanding of like, how to make connections, especially IRL connections. and how i literally did not deeply and genuinely understand WHY people went to church and did sports and joined after-school clubs until i was like 17 or 18. i literally didn’t understand the concept of like, involving myself in community activities and reaching out and building connections… i spent from like 3rd grade onward totally immersed in these online communities where i could escape from the bullying and social ostracism i faced IRL as a freako spaz hyperactive loud annoying child who did not read social signals properly and had vocally bizarre interests and violated other ppls personal space… like when i realized that i didnt socialize right i just stopped trying because of how much it hurt! i could connect to people online and i would roleplay all day, and when i didnt like the persona id built id craft another. i loved learning things other kids didnt know about, things kids werent supposed to know about, and i loved feeling smarter because my self esteem had been so crushed by how much i was teased and made the butt of jokes. and as a child, that just drew me so much further away from making real life connections with kids my own age. it was so easy to escape. it was so easy to just disappear and move elsewhere online if things werent going well or if i became uncomfortable. and now im an adult and i know how things work and ive stuck to places with more consistency, but im still suffering from how deeply ingrained these things are. i complain about isolation and how lonely i am and how i dont feel a sense of community at my college and i feel isolated as a gay trans person. but you know? i dont fucking go out there and do stuff. i dont do clubs. i dont do groups. i dont sit around and open myself up to interaction at all. i never hang out. i literally go from class, eat food, and go to my room. like fuck, i went out to smoke the other day and i was just relaxing on a bench and a girl stopped by and we talked for 40 minutes. i need to open myself up to it, because im not that kid anymore!!! im enjoyable, im funny, im engaged, i have good stories, and i like to listen. i need to trust in that. i need to physically be out in the world more to be more in touch with my irl community. i need to be more open. i need to be more receptive.

The show didn’t deserve this, it had so much more potential. The crew had been screwed over, they had wanted more seasons but they were given a ridiculous excuse “80 episodes are enough”, I felt so bad for the crew and the other fans, there was so much more to learn, I felt the determination and sadness radiating off the fandom that night.

This is going to get personal…

As I said in my last post, due to my long term illness and mental health problems I can’t really have my own adventures so I loved being a part of Wander’s. Wander and friends became family to me.

I actually think my mental health has worsened now because those adventures have ended and my “family disappeared”. Obviously they’d have to end at some point but it was just so sudden, but also the sadness of knowing what could have been has put a sad feeling over WOY for me.

I’ll admit, I at first delved into SaveWOY really hard out of desperation. I feared for my own life, this show saved me from depression and it was suddenly being pulled away from me, how was I going to survive? Throwing myself into it kept me busy and determined. But I remember admitting to one of my fellow mods that come June 27th I feared I would take my own life if SaveWOY hadn’t worked by then. I know, it’s unhealthy to be so dependant on a show, but I hadn’t even realised it was that bad.

Thankfully the fight is still going and I’m still here today. I don’t watch cartoons as much now after WOY got cancelled though. I just feel so sour about what Disney did.

After coming clean with all of this, I’m now thinking that I’m not cut out for this campaign. I have the passion that has driven me forward but it was forged from a coping mechanism that evolved into an unhealthy obsession and a fear for my own life.
Does that make my efforts valid? For this reason I was always due to burn out eventually right?Even if we save WOY, I will be so happy, but I now know that things can’t go on this way. It was incredibly dangerous and foolish of me to rest my whole fate on a cartoon and it nearly cost me. I see this problem, but I currently still have no other coping method.

A year on, if you ask me why I want to SaveWOY?

It’s just for the fans and the crew. They deserve it. Yes, I want more adventures, I want to see these characters again, but in terms of it helping me; I’m too far gone, I always was and just didn’t realise it; but I want to help my friends and fellow fans even if I can’t help myself.

Although with my current health I’m not sure how much longer I can keep that up for. I’m not sure if this is the depression talking or myself, but this is what’s been on my mind lately.

STEVE ROGERS ONE SHOT

Warnings: Swearing

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Y/N - Your name, Y/L/N - Your Last Name

REQUEST:
The reader is an Avenger and she and Steve like each other, but are too proud to admit it. There are many indirect flirtations, discussions that always begins with Steve saying “must be because you spend a lot of time with Tony” and she “You’re jealous, Captain?” but someone always interferes. AND MUCH, MUCH, MUCH sexual tension. One day, the team is tired of so much sexual tension rolling over the two that end up calling Nick Fury to resolve the situation. Thanks!

Here you go darling! I hope you like it!

It was early morning and Y/N was already cranky because she woke up late. She was rushing into the kitchen to grab a coffee when she stubbed her toe and fell to the floor clutching her foot. A string of curse words left her mouth and she looked around for the reason for her pain. Leaning against the kitchen island was Cap’s shield.

Authors Note: Hello! This Shannon Leto quote inspired fic was requested by the amazing @bradlea23 . I have to admit that at first, I was like whattttt but as I wrote it, it flowed so nicely and I hope that you enjoy it lovely! XOXO

My head feels like I got by a truck but I manage to stumble out of bed. Her eyes are flashing inside of my head but I push it out as I stand in my kitchen thinking of what I needed to get done today. But as I moved to grab a coffee cup, I could hear her voice in my head but then I began to see her.

“How many cups is that now,” she laughed as she reached to take the coffee out of my hand.

I blinked a couple of times confused when she reached for the cup but disappeared. I slammed on the buttons hoping to wake my mind up. I knew that I wasn’t over what happened last week but it still shouldn’t make me hallucinate. I sipped on the liquid gold that I could only describe as the best thing on the planet. The waves of heat warmed my mouth as I placed it to my lips. But then I saw her eyes staring at me over the rim of the cup.

Her elbows resting on the black tile of the counter. Hands cradling her face as she just stared at me.

“You know I’m not going away and I think you also know why,” she smiled as she laid her arms straight out for me.

“You have got to be kidding me,” I shouted as I walked around the corner to sit on the sofa.

where I’m jax daughter and he like thew me out and one year I become
successful with singing and they come see me in my singing and listen to
the song I sing you don’t own me by grace and colors by halesy and the
WHOLE (i.e.) like tara and gemma is there club is shocked and they try
to talk to me but security doesn’t let them so they follow me into my
Manson and they are shocked I have a huge house and a baby girl but they
tell me they need help with money and I help them and happy ending BTW
the baby girl is happy’s

Sing it out

I had a pretty good childhood, filled with love and
attention from my grandparents and even my father Jackson. They did their best
on trying to soothe the pain that my junkie mother left hanging in the air, by
the time my brother Abel was born I was already 12 years old and I could see in
my father’s eyes how everything he ever build, how the love and affection he
had turned black. Not long after that Tara was already in the picture but I
didn’t like her, at the end of the day I was a product of her breaking my
father’s heart, a product of a loveless marriage and relationship just for the
sake of forgetting and not being alone, and that’s not fair. My grandmother
tried her best to make me relax and see how loved and wanted I was but the
minute Tara started raising my brother like it was her son I lost it. I was
made of one of the worst combinations someone could do a junkie and an outlaw,
I started being rebellious, hanging with the wrong crowd and doing everything I
could to get away from all the pain I felt inside of me.

By the time I was 17 things were growing thicker,
there were more issues, everything was going to shit basically and the end of
the tunnel was Jackson killing my grandfather, Clay was one of the few figures
I still looked up to. He loved me, unlike my father and I shot myself down and
not even my grandmother could help on taking me out of that place I was in, I
was in deep hole and the way up was to hard to try and reach for help but he
appeared, Happy Lowman, the Tacoma Killer took me out of there, I knew he
didn’t have the intention to start what we did, he was only doing the job my
father told him to “Keep her safe” but he did even more than that,
gave me a reason to live and no more loveless nights, cured my deep wounds and
made me understand how precious love could be even in the darkest times but
everything good has to come to an end and so did my beautiful fairytale.
Pregnancy. I went with shaking legs to my grandmother, a crying mess. She looked
at me in the eyes with so much calmness but I could see the fear and regrets in
her eyes, I was repeating the story. 18 years old parent like my father and
probably as a bad one as he was when times got rough.

“Who’s
the father baby?” She said and I started crying even louder “Is he not taking care of it?”

“No” I said
softly still a crying mess “He
doesn’t know yet. He can’t know"

"He’s a
brother” she said
with a soft voice and I nodded “Oh
my darling” she sighed. My father was going to kill me and to be
honest I wish he had because living to see the look in his blue eyes I sadly
shared and the awful words leaving his mouth made me wish I was never born in
the first time.

“You’re
just a stupid whore, just like your mother YN!” He screamed
over and over again “FUCKING
DISAPPEAR, GO AWAY FROM HERE I NEVER WANNA SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN” he
said and those were the last words I’d ever share with the man I once called my
father.

I left Charming that same night looking for a
better life, a better life that wasn’t easy to achieve but a lot of hard work
made me reach it. From singing in old crusty bars to actually being on stage
was one of the biggest achievements I made, and all thanks to my only reason to
keep fighting, baby Jessi who was not such a baby nowadays, she was taller than
her classmates and shared that wicked little smile and eyes part of the Teller
clan but with tanned skin and darker hair thanks to his father. Tonight I was
playing in Oakland, far enough from Charming but I could still feel the shivers
in my skin due to feeling so much familiarity around. Jessi gave me a thumbs up
and sent me a small kiss before putting her headphones and sitting next to the
sound box and I smiled in return, the lights were on now and there in the
center of the room was my father, next to Tara and my grandmother looking at me
proudly like if the pain inflicted was just in my dreams but I still sang, sang
like never before to show them how good I was, how much I worked to be there
and how much I deserved to be on top. I knew when I headed backstage after the
show that they would follow me there and I waited patiently for my bodyguard to
knock and I opened the door and just nodded silently, minutes later the people
I dreaded the more to see where standing in front of me but there stood a
different face I didn’t see from stage and all I thought about saying was long
forgotten.

“Abel” I said with
a loud whisper, 5 years old Abel was long gone and a proud 11 years old stood
there rocking the blonde hair to the back our father did and blue checked shirt
matching his eyes. I immediately stood up to hug him and I hold him tightly.
“You are so grown up!” I
said, small tears dropping from my eyes “Do you even remember me?”

“Grandma showed me all the letter you sent” he said and I smiled at my
grandmother who just nodded at me “You’re
my sister” he said and I nodded.

Working on my relationship with my father was the most difficult part,
Abel and I hit off really well from the beginning and he loved playing with his
little niece around. Tara was respectful and she took her time before getting
slowly closer to Jessi or even me. I’m not going to lie and say it was easy for
me to go back to Charming, to finally see Happy after all that time but I
craved seeing him and introducing him to the baby girl. I knew Jackson had
called him to come to the grandma’s house to talk and I could feel my whole
world crumbling while Jessi just ran around the house being chased by Abel, a
lot of laughs everywhere but I was about to have a nervous breakdown.

When I finally saw him, I saw the hurt of me leaving him behind in his
eyes, the hurt of me never trying to contact him or look for him but the minute
Jax’s words left his mouth about my kid Happy’s face changed from angry to
surprised or even touched. Jax looked at him waiting for me to talk.

“I’m so sorry” I said and he just nodded, our eyes speaking more than a
million words but it was broken by my little girl running inside the living
room and asking for grandad Jax to pick her up and I saw Happy smile, smile
like he never did before and I knew in that moment I was finally home.

A/N: So this is a sequel to One Last Time , Finally! Uh, I’m pretty sure a few people have been waiting for it, I’m sorry~ But this is what I came up with! Hope you guys like it! Please give me feedback, if you have the time! It helps a lot!

I was a mess, I didn’t function properly not after Maria had left. Funny how the winter weather mimicked my mood. But I had to continue on, even though I looked for Maria everyday. She was true to her word, months have passed by and I still haven’t found her. Eliza and Alexander helped me through it, making sure that I could get by. I had become a shell of myself, but pushed on. I kept myself fed and clean while still maintaining the job I had, but it was the only thing I did.

The puffs of my breath were visible before me as I walked through the snow covered streets. I pulled my thick grey scarf higher up my face to stop it from freezing. People were still walking around the shops, despite being late at night. I did this often nowadays, walk to the park to clear my head. It got increasingly difficult as the storms of winter came, but I still went walking.

I huffed as I sat down on the bench that I usually sat down on every time I came to the park. Fortunately, the park was empty tonight, besides the few people who cut through instead of walking all the way around it.

“Tough night?” I heard a voice speak up as someone sat down beside me.

“More like tough year.” I laughed once, but it had no humorous tone.

“Me too,” he sighed out slowly as we watched the sky.

“What about?” I asked softly, he was the first person I’ve talked to besides Alexander, Eliza and coworkers in months. It felt oddly nice.

“Competition at everything, school, work, friends, the other guy is always one step ahead of me.” I could sense he glanced at me, “What about you?”

My trauma encompassed my soul for so many years. I was not a person. I was an empty shell, drifting through life, running from a moment in time that had already happened. I felt the further I buried myself into the ground, if I could just disappear, it would all go away. That I could just go away, and that no one would be given the opportunity to get to know me or see me, because in reality, there was no one to know anymore.

This is what an assault does to you. And you need to know that I understand. And so many of us understand. And that you are not alone.

And you are still there, I promise you. You are still living and breathing and beautiful. You will someday, when you come up for air, catch your breath, and you will find yourself again. Because as lost as we feel, we are not gone. The trail in the forest always leads out; we just need to find the right trail again.

And just know there are so many of us here to help you, who understand, who are walking along on our own trails. Who still hit bumps on the way, who struggle with the navigation, who take so many steps forward and sometimes take a couple steps back.

And that’s okay.

Please keep going, because you deserve to. You are a beautiful human being, deserving of the life you always wanted and dreamed. No one deserves to take you from you.

Note: I received a request from @heirofthejedi but unfortunately their message disappeared from my inbox so hopefully they will see this. I really enjoyed writing this up….I could have done even more so I hope you enjoy it too :)

Summary: You are the twin sister of Emma Swan but the Shadow takes you to Neverland where you fall in love with Peter Pan. Life couldn’t be any better…until you hear of his plan to stay alive.

Words: 1190

You once thought that the only
life you would ever know is the one you had in Storybrooke with your family.
You had such a strong bond with your twin, Emma, and when she brought Henry
into the world you had never felt love like what you felt towards him before. He
fast became your world and you would often spoil him rotten. It didn’t take
long for you to gain the title of ‘Best Auntie in the world’ …..which you
were more than happy to take of course. Life couldn’t have been any more perfect
for you.

Then the Shadow came for you.

It had been like any other day,
an exhausting one filled with fun activities with Henry, so the second you had
slipped underneath the covers of your bed you could already feel yourself
slipping into a much-needed sleep. You didn’t know how long you had been asleep
for before you had heard your bedroom window opening but your eyes snapped open
out of pure instinct. The most you had been expecting to see was that the wind
had managed to do it…..but you were so wrong.

There was something looming over
you, a dark shadow, it was something that wouldn’t look out of place in a
horror movie and yet there was no trace of fear running through you. Amazingly
you felt at ease and didn’t hesitate in taking hold of its hand and simply
gazed at the form as it took you from both your home and the life you knew.
Your home vanished from view but there was no sadness and there was no desire
to even give it one last look.

REQUEST: Hi I was wondering if I could have a Jerome Valeska imagine? The reader would be Jim Gordon’s niece. And then like Jerome helps her find herself when she struggles to fit in at college? and Jim is really worried when Jerome kidnaps her during the invasion of the police department scene ? It would be in video. The reader would then decide to stay with Jerome when Jim comes to try and rescue her ?The reader would be shadowing Jim Gordon on one of his cases since she is interested in law and helping people. This would take place when Jerome and his team invaded the Gotham Police Department. Hope this helps! :)

FANDOM: Jerome Valeska [Gotham]

AUTHOR: MK (purityimagines)

TAGS: mention of bullying, swearing, kidnapping, crime, murder

Jerome adjusts the buttons on the camera. “Greenwood. You do the honours.” He finishes restraining me to my chair as Robert Greenwood, member of the Maniax turns the flash of the camera on. The light blinds me for a couple of seconds before recovering and seeing the appearance of the ginger again. I couldn’t help but stay quiet as I see Jerome angling the air with his fingers, measuring the right profile of how to film everything- me, kidnapped, separated from my uncle Jim Gordon with the GCPD destroyed, lights broken, dead bodies lying everywhere.

I knew I should have stayed home today.

Jerome grins slyly. “What’s the matter, Y/N? The camera would love you even better if you smiled!”

I exhale, trying to calm myself down. “Where’s Jim Gordon?” I recite my uncle’s name, avoiding to let him know that I was Jim’s niece.

Jerome smiled and tilted his head as if he was daydreaming about fairytales and ponies. “Disneyland! He promised to submit a postcard with Mickey Mouse ears as a present wrapped in a package just for you!” He taps my nose with his finger while saying ‘you’.

I ball my hands into a fist. This shouldn’t be happening. I should be at home, safe and sound, curled up in my bed and studying for an upcoming exam. But here I am, tied to a chair, kidnapped and held by no other than Jerome Valeska. He was so super hero and one hell of a villain if you ask me.

Jerome Valeska is as cold as ice. His smile made him look even more scary than ever. Whenever he smiled, it was hard to tell whether he liked you, he smiled at the thought of your dead body lying in front of him, or he plans on doing his worst. There was nothing in between. He was just so scary.

“I’m not stupid,” I sneer, gaining confidence.

Jerome cackles. “Such fantastic bravery you got there, Y/N! If only I could tell you where your uncle Jim Gordon could be at this moment- but unfortunately I am not entirely sure. But I’d be surprised if he legitimately went to Disneyland!”