A Must Read To Improve Your Communication Skills Would you like to be a more effective communicator? Would you like your intimate partner to listen to you more? How about having better results at a networking meeting? There is one thing you can do which will make all the difference in the world in what you bring out of the other person. Before I spell it out, let me say that neurobiologists talk about right brain to right brain communication….

A Powerful Tool to Go From Conflict to Peace I want to discuss with you one of the most powerful tools I know that can de-escalate conflict. This tool can be used with your intimate partner as well as in any relationship. It is particularly useful at this time of the year when underlying conflicts seem to come to the surface. (I am already seeing it in the phone calls I am getting since last week and continuing this week)….

One thing I have heard hundreds if not thousands of times is the statement,” No matter how much I give to my partner, it is never enough.” Here is the truth- we give to our partner the way we want our partner to give to us. The problem with that is what your partner needs to FEEL LOVED is different than what YOU need to feel loved. I write about that in my book, “The Long Hot Marriage.” Gary Chapman…

Effective: Clean communication- clean communication is when the only intent of your communication is to reveal something about yourself. Example: I am angry with you for getting defensive rather than listening. Destructive: Unclean communication- unclean communication is when you have other intentions such as punishing the other person defending yourself, getting rid of your own tension or proving you are right. Example: Yelling loudly- your listening skills suck! (Getting rid of tension) Effective: Being receptive which includes dropping your own…

I have been to many parties where people would come up to my wife and say- “You must have a perfect marriage- you are married to a marriage therapist.” And my wife found that comment very funny! The truth is- yes- I am a marriage therapist, and I am also a human being who grew up in a family where great communication was not modeled. There were many times I would be helping a couple with communication and suddenly had…

Ever have a simple item of discussion turn into a multiple hour fight? What should have been a simple chat, becomes another battle; and by the end of it, you’re no closer together. I see it all the time with the couples I help. It comes down to a few styles of communication that are standing in the way of smooth sailing. Watch this video to find out what kind of dynamic is going on in your home. And of…

Say “I” statements. Don’t be defensive. Repeat the words that your partner said. These are a few of the things people hear at basic communication seminars or what they read in communication articles. That is all well and good except that there is something that everyone has to do before anything else so that communication can be effective. And here it is: DROP YOUR AGENDA! What do I mean by that? I mean stop trying to accomplish ANYTHING when your…

We will discuss maintaining or adding more passion and intimacy to your long term relationship. Why is it hard to keep passion alive? How to develop “emotional muscle”? Have effective communication Perceptions of your partner What is romance? Keep romance alive in relationship Be courageous & experimental Turn up the love volume and listen to the show here: http://www.newvisionsradio.com/ Or check out the archive here: www.lovecoachjourney.com/more-passion

As I continue my month-long theme of Sexuality Through the Years, today’s blog is about parents who have young children. These parents are usually still in their sexual prime but there bodies might not feel like it, especially the mom! Lack of sleep as well as constantly paying attention for the safety and welfare of babies and young children can take a bite out of the erotic side of a marriage. Here are 7 tips that I have used with…

One thing I have learned as a marriage and sex therapist is that our role models have fallen short in instructing us how to have a thriving marriage. It’s not their fault; they just did not know. The good news is that there are guides “out there” and resources inside of each one of us that could help us experience the committed relationship we would love to have. So read between the lines in this article! Here are 7 ways…