WWF RAW is WAR

23.8.99

BLAH

Good eye, CRZ. I also saw some people walking on camera that
definitely should not have been together. If you look closely, you
actually see the Rock accidently walk on camera, stop and give a "whoa"
look as soon as he realizes it, and walk off...with Mr. Ass right next to
him. That one was pretty easy to spot, and it actually happenned before
the Rock "arrived" in his limo.

A much less obvious mistake happenned a bit later when Bradshaw could be seen
with the Hollys.

Gotta love live television!

Lots of people wrote me to tell me that GZA was part of the Wu-Tang Clan
and there was no shame in not knowing that. Thanks to all.

Proving that I have friends in high places looking out for me, Robert
Harris writes:

Hey, CRZ-man, enjoyed the reports as always ...thought I'd answer a
question for you -- from your WCW Nitro report, you wrote -- And WHY
did
they decide it was a good idea to put KETCHUP on the JUMBO JACK?

I, in my high and mighty day job (ha!) as AM of a JIB here in Fort
Worth, can answer that. This (putting ketchup on the JJ) was done right
before we remodeled the Jack kitchens for "Assemble to Order" back in the
later part of 1998 ...as a matter of fact, I pulled the memo for it
....this is almost word for word....

"Rationale: We have extensively taste tested our Ketchup Jumbo Jack in our
test markets, and it has done extremely well. We feel that the addition of
ketchup will increase the appeal of the JJ to a wider selection of
guests."

Hahahaha, we thought it was funny too ....in other sauce news, look for
the secret sauce to disappear from any burgers it is already on, to be
replaced by mustard and (speak of the devil) ketchup. The memo (sent a
couple of days ago), please

"Rationale: We are looking to make the smaller burgers more marketable and
get more guests to buy the Cheeseburger, Double Cheeseburger, and
Hamburger. For those "Die-hard" Secret Sauce fans, it will be available in
a drip cut upon request ONLY. "

Gotta love Jack lol ...however, I have seen the new DC comic Kids Meal
toys, and those are cool (so I'm a Green Lantern mark ...bite me, or
whatever the coolest catchphrase is lately.)

I hope you print this in your letters column.

So, (thanks Robert) it looks like Foodmaker Inc. - in their *infinite*
wisdom - are going to take a known and loved product, tinker with it in an
attempt to make it more marketable and appealing to the masses, but
ultimately drive away the people that made it successful in the first
place, to find that they're replaced with...no one. Sounds SUPER smart.
I can't BELIEVE people think this business model would ever WORK.

Oh well. On with YOUR sani-fresh RAW recap! ONLY ON WRESTLELINE!

NO ONION-MAYO SAUCE HERE, BABY!

TONIGHT: We'll take a look at SummerSlam! Here's a photo from the Star
Tribune! We'll talk to new champion Mankind! We'll be updated on the
condition of Stone Cold Steve Austin! (Do they EVER have one of these
promos without mentioning Austin?) All this and more...COMING UP!

BLAH

RAW

5.4

TV-14-DLV - *n* W*rld L**d*r *tt*t*d* - WWF

Last night on SummerSlam, WWF Magazine (ha) took all these purty pitchers
from the title match. End result was Mankind pinning Steve Austin to win
the WWF title, followed by Triple H dismantling Austin's knee with a STEEL
chair

Closed captioned logo - opening credits

FIREWORKS! WE ARE LIVE from the Hilton Colesium on the campus of Iowa
State University in Ames, IA 23.8.99 and on the USA Network (and maybe TSN
sooner or later). I almost thought I heard somebody try to pass off this
show as "action/adventure" again...

JIM ROSS is ready to welcome the new World Wrestling Federation champion
to the ring, but he is interrupted (rather rudely!) by TRIPLE H & THAT
SLUT CHYNA, who is gonna have none of that. Last night was HIS night but
he was screwed again. Every time an obstacle was placed and the bar was
raised, he managed to rise above it. Then he gets to SummerSlam and "some
bogus referee" wouldn't make the count on him. It ended up one on one,
Helmsley and Austin - and he did what he said - Pedigree. But before he
could get the pin - Mick Foley stole his thunder. Something got censored
here, most likely a bullshit of some sort. Helmsley says all he's got to
look back on was the fact that he crippled Stone Cold Steve Austin - and
he'll never be the same again. Finally, Ross has heard enough - and
before he can leave the ring, Helmsley stops him and talks about Austin
and Foley being his "boys." He accuses Ross of enjoying his humiliation -
but that's okay, becuase he'll enjoy "this" - then he takes Ross and slaps
him in an armbar, demanding Mick Foley come out and grant him a title shot
before he breaks his arm. Ross is tapping out - like that'll help.
MANKIND is out. "You come any closer and I will break it. Mick, you
screwed me last night - well paybacks are a bitch pal. I want what is
mine!" Mankind says he doesn't have to threaten JR, all he has to do is
ask. Triple H says tonight, and Mankind says fine, but let him go. H
goes ahead and breaks his arm anyway (complete with unsynchronised "sound
effect" and Ross flopping around with his arm at an awkward angle).
Mankind, now standing over Ross, tells H that if he's broken his arm, then
he'll break his promise - no title shot. Well, now here's SKIPPY come out
to "No Chance in Hell" and he's going to make sure everyone keeps their
promises. He orders a title defense against Triple H - oh, and "have a
nice day." A couple EMT's are working on Ross' arm as we take our first
ad break.

Let Us Take You Back to Moments Ago - and a slo-mo of Triple H breaking
Ross' arm - followed by Shane making the match for later tonight

We Look Live at Ross being loaded into the ambulance - he gives Mick a
thumbs up before they close the door.

JERRY LAWLER sits alone. Tonight on the big show, the aforementioned
title match,

5.7

a tag team title match as the Acolytes take on Big
Show & Undertaker. Also, the Rock takes on Gangrel. MICHAEL KING COLE
makes it a pair of kings as he joins Lawler at the commentary table.

ROAD DOGG v. AL SNOW (with Pepper) for the Hardcore Championship - Snow
barely gives Dogg a chance to finish his introduction (and tell the crowd
he likes to smoke big fat joints) as he attacks from behind. Cookie sheet
here, table there. Snow tries to go through a table with a ladder and
fails. As Dogg powerbombs Snow through the table, and as the "Y2J"
countdown appears on the EntertainmentTron, CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO appears
and attacks the Dogg. They brawl back up the ramp and away, leaving Snow
to cringe in the corpse of the table. BIG BOSSMAN picks his spot, giving
the nightstick to Snow, then lifting the Pet Taxi, with Pepper inside.
(no contest? under 3)

Meanwhile, backstage, Dogg is pretty much dismantling Jericho Hardcore
style. As Jericho is deposited in the cyclone fence backdrop, we see
Bossman walk by, Pet Taxi in hand. He dumps pepper in the back of a car
and drives off. Snow runs behind, but won't catch up...

Acclaim Sports WWF Attitude ad

Let Us Take You Back to the pullapart between Dogg and Jericho, Bossman
loading Pepper in the back seat, and driving off. Oh man, I hope Mathilda
and Frankie aren't in there too!

A frantic Snow asks some crew members if they've seen Pepper, apparently
unaware that Bossman kept the dog as he left...?

X-PAC & THROUGH HELL FIRE AND BRIMSTONE IT'S KANE walk to the commentary
table as Cole announces that Ross suffered a fracture.

WELL IT'S A BIG SHOW & UNDERTAKER (with Paul Bearer) v. ACOLYTES for the
tag team championship - okay, let's lose the ring announcer. Acolytes
attack, and Big Show hits a double clothesline to stop that. Bradshaw
goes outside and it's Faarooq and Big Show in the ring. Big boot takes
him down. Bradshaw from behind to regain the advantage for his team.
Nice shoulderblock from the top by Bradshaw. 2 count. 'Taker distracts
Faarooq and Big Show knocks HIM out of the ring. He lands on the
commentary table, then takes a swipe at Kane. Somehow this leads to Big
Show hitting X-Pac with ahhhhhtheCHOKESLAAAAM while the Acolytes
doubleteam Kane. (no contest? DQ? 1:39)

2.5

5.6

Kane comes to following
the replays, and tends to his partner. Did Lawler just make an "A
Christmas Story" reference?

Backstage, Stephanie and Test share a private moment with the camera and
millions of fans. Stephanie's job is to beam.

The JVCKaboom!box Kaboom! of the week is Shane's surprising top
turnbuckle"elbowdrop" on Test through the Spanish announce table from last
night's SummerSlam.

"Three nights ago, two sports entertainers disappeared in the woods near
Ames, Iowa while shooting a documentary. Yesterday afternoon, their
footage was found. The Blonde Bytch Project" - and there's a logo with
tits. Stevie Richards makes fun of Meanie's inability to win at "WWF
Attitude," while Meanie retorts with "When we had 'In Your House' and I
was Ahmed Johnson, you couldn't touch me!" Meanie says maybe they should
explore the legend of the blonde bytch...taking their cameras, of course.
We'll see more of this...umm, excitement...Thursday on SmackDown!

LILIAN GARCIA is your new ring announcer. Fine, she's very attractive.
But, I mean, she ain't exactly Mike McGuirk, naah mean? (Half of you
probably have NO IDEA who I'm talking about - which makes me pretty
old...) Also, poor ol' Tony Chimel never got chyron. Bill Dunn never got
chyron. That other guy whose name I never learned got chyron. Howard
Finkel got chyron, but he was always "THE FINK" in super quotes. Oh well,
while I muse, TEST comes out, and we check out some stills from last
night's Love Her or Leave Her match, eventually won by Test *despite* the
efforts of the returning Mean Street Posse and with a bit of help from the
returning Patterson & Brisco. "Everybody knows I went through a lot last
night - hell, I've been through a lot in the past few months. But it's
all been for one reason, and one reason only. And if I had to do it
again, I would. But, there comes a time in every man's life when he has
to ask certain questions, and sometimes he's gotta pop them. So Stephanie
McMahon, will you come down here please?" STEPHANIE McMAHON, all smiles,
ambles over to the ring. But before anything else happens, SKIPPY
*sprints* out to the ring. "I will not let you ruin Stephanie's life! And
the only way this relationship is gonna continue is over my dead body!"
"That can be arranged --" but before he strikes, Stephanie stands between
them. "Shane, how could you? How DARE you! I LOVE him! I love Andrew
more than anything else in this world. He makes me happy! But I guess
you don't care about my happiness. I guess you don't care how I feel at
all. All my life it's always been about you. How YOU wanted me to act,
who YOU wanted me to be. I'm your sister! Why can't you LOVE me for who
I am? Why would you want to take this away from me?" Oh, geez, just
LADLE it on. "Steph, forget about him. There's something I have to ask
you." Then he's on one knee... "Will you marry me?" Stephanie, eyes
wide, is all smiles, but she looks over at Shane, who makes a puppy face.
"Andrew - Andrew, I LOVE you, I LOVE you, but I just um....I just need
some time. But I LOVE you" and they embrace. "I love you - I just need
some time..." "I understand." Test parts the ropes for Stephanie, then
turns to Shane. A smile creeps across Shane's face, and he leaves the
ring, his gaze never leaving Test.

God, it IS a soap opera. I think I liked it better when it wasn't so....
OBVIOUS. You know? Maybe the chicks dig it. I dunno.

Time now for the Rescue of the Week, thanks to the United States Coast
Guard! It's Mark Henry rescuing D'Lo Brown - err, no, wait, it's Henry
breaking a guitar across his back. Never mind.

5.9

How can you, as a devout, diehard Chris Jericho fan, stand around
while the Road Dogg puts his filthy, grimy hands on me and commits the
crime of assault and battery? You know I'm here to save the WWF and I'm
here to save your job. Well, I don't need a sniveling FINK of a man on my
team. What I need on my team is a champion - I need a WARRIOR. Edward, I
need a WARRIOR who's gonna stand up and FIGHT for what he believe in,
who's gonna stand up and FIGHT for Y-2-J. Do you understand?" Finkel
looks skyward, ponders, then smiles...and nods. I think they said
"warrior" too many times...

JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET, DE-BRA & SEXUAL CHOCOLATE MIZARK HENRY walk
out to the ring as we're reminded that the WWF will be at the Kemper Arena
in Kansas City, MO tomorrow (which, by the way, is a Smackdown! taping).
"That's right, we did it! WE did it! You know, first of all, Sexual
Chocolate, for making the right career decision last night, I want to
personally thank you with a gift. Tonight, consider yourself the NEW
European Champion! And Debra - my precious Debra. What a beautiful plan
- from start to finish, it was all you. It was all you, and since I'm in
such a giving mood tonight, I've got a special surprise for you. That's
right, she's got the puppies, but Debra, being the Executive Director of
Jarrett Enterprises, I decided that you need some help. That YOU needed a
personal assistant. So as everybody said we all KNOW you've got the
puppies, but tonight, you've got MISS KITTY!" And out comes another
blonde in miniskirt, wonderbra, and all greased up. Look carefully,
Debra, she's a lot younger than you - no doubt a future replacement.
"And last but not least, I can stand here in this very ring and say
without a shadow of a doubt that I am the greatest Intercontinental
champion of all time! So on the locker room door, I've signed an open
contract. And if anybody out back there thinks they've got what it takes,
well then step up to the plate, sign the dotted line and give it your best
damn shot to take MY belt away. Now let's get Meat down here, and Mark,
make short work of him."

Backstage, we see D'Lo Brown putting a major league beatdown on Meat - ha!
Lookit the other wrestlers scatter when the camera pans too far left!

Back to Henry, awaiting an opponent - but it's *Brown's* music starting...

SEXUAL CHOCOLATE MIZARK HENRY v. D'LO BROWN for the European Championship
- Brown's all over him until Henry presses Brown and lets him drop to the
mat. Legdrop misses and D'Lo hits a spinning wheel kick. Standing
flourished legdrop. There's the 'Lo-down! Now Jarrett is in (DQ :59) and
that's it for now...I guess...hmm, I wish that match had been shorter -
HA!

Backstage, Mr. Ass is in sight of the contract, but has no pen. Chyna
walks by, and he asks her if she's got a pen. Nope. "Well, can you stay
here and make sure nobody signs this?" Chyna giggles "okay," then signs
the contract herself.

Somewhere else, hey! It's the Rock - and he's WALKING!

Here's that preview of the SummerSlam encore we've been waiting all show
for - yup

When we come back, Mr. Ass is looking for Chyna...hmm, wonder why. Ha!

THE ROCK (with RAW credits and TV-14-DLV ratings box) v. GANGREL (with the
Hardy Boyz and a burning ring o' far) - Rock says some stuff that
entertains everybody but me. You get the feeling that Rock keeps a closet
full of jars of monkey piss in his home in Miami? You know, just in case
of emergency and stuff. Where does he GET all that monkey piss, anyway?
And how come I can figure out he keeps saying "monkey piss" despite USA's
Herculean attempts to blot it from the soundtrack in order to protect my
delicate ears?

2.7

6.0

Rock meets Gangrel up on the ramp and takes out all
three men. Rock continues to take Gangrel outside. Gangrel rolls in and
the opening bell sounds. Kick, stomp, right, head to the buckle, whip
into the opposite corner, clothesline out, vertical suplex, 1, 2, no.
Right, whip, reversal, right from Gangrel, right from Rock. Head to the
buckle, right, off the ropes, Gangrel holds on and goes outside - that's
enough no offense for me, he's saying! Rock goes out and follows, but
Matt Hardy attacks from behind while Jeff discusses philosophy with
referee "Blind" Mike Chioda. Back in the ring, Gangrel stomps on Rock's
head, right, block, Rock with right, right, right, off the ropes,
reversal, Rock with a kick, boot to the gut, DDT, 2 count. Off the ropes,
reversal, Matt Hardy holds the boot and distracts the Rock, but he STILL
dumps Gangrel over the rope to the floor. But Gangrel manages a hot shot
on the Rock, then gets back in to stomp him out to the floor. Rock blocks
a punch from Matt and delivers one of his own, but falls to "what a
manoeuvre!" from Jeff as he runs the barricade and attacks. EDGE &
CHRISTIAN are out to chase the Hardyz away. Gangrel brings the Rock back
in, hits a Side Russian legsweep and floatsover for 2. In the corner,
into the opposite corner, but the Rock ducks the charge and drops him on
the turnbuckle. Punching away now, off the ropes, Gangrel holds on, so
Rock pulls him back and into a Samoan Drop for 2. Gangrel tries a DDT,
but Rock blocks it and hits an atomic drop. There's Rock Bottom, and
there's the People's Elbow. 1, 2, 3. (4:33) Replay of Jeff Hardy's cool
dive which apparently had no effect on the Rock, and the People's Elbow.
Rock's still there and now he's got the mic for ANOTHER promo. Apparently,
he's unhappy that he's fighting people like Gangrel while a whiner like
Triple H gets title shots.

Howard Finkel, in sweat suit, in a gym, mantras "I'm a warrior! I can do
it!" Repeat ad nauseum.

SMACKDOWN! premiers Thursday! 8/7 on Some Other Network! Exclamation
points!

KEVIN "NAILZ" KELLY interviews TORI in the back. Ivory's got some sort of
humilation fetish, says Tori, so how about a little evening gown match
Thursday - she can relieve her of her clothes AND her title. Then she
asks whatever happened to that Sable chick - she was her biggest fan!!

The Ultimate Warrior's theme music and lighting treatment fire up - and
out comes HOWARD FINKEL. Whoops, guess he DID get his own chyron after
all. "Chris Jericho has come to the World Wrestling Federation to benefit
EVERYBDOY! Chris Jericho has come to the World Wrestling Federation to
make this a better place! I BELIEVE in Chris Jericho and applaud
everything he's done thus far! However, there are a few simpletons in
this organisation that don't get it, don't have a clue, don't understand.
One of them is you, Road Dogg. I saw you a few moments ago in the back,
picking your nose. Well, why don't you do something a little more
constructive that than and come out to this ring and join me because *I*
want to let YOU know what Y2J is all about." Do you see the intricate
threads binding together this whole bit? Fink's distraught to the point
of his mind disappearing at Vince's exit. AND he's got a grudge against
the man who tar'd and feather'd him a while back! Compare this to "we
forgot what just happened" over on the other channel. G'wan I DARE ya.
Anyway, "Oh you didn't know? Finkel your ass better CALLLL
somebooodyyyy..." "Surely...surely

2.6

5.4

you're joking." "J-joking?
Road Dogg, YOU'RE a joke. I'm - I'm mad as hell, and I'm not gonna take
it anymore, Road Dogg...DAMMIT." And he shoves him one. "Howard, you've
been dippin' into my fat sack again, haven't ya?" "You don't believe me,
right? You don't believe what I'm saying? Believe this again, Road Dogg"
and there's another shove. Road Dogg grabs Finkel by the collar - but the
Y2J countdown appears again - the lights go out - BOOM! - and whoops,
actually CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO has appeared behind Road Dogg and attacks
from behind. There's a powerbomb! But he doesn't let go - there's a
SECOND powerbomb! THE ARROGANT COVER!! Road Dogg is left laying in the
ring as Jericho walks back up the ramp - still ordering Finkel all along
the way. A replay from a different angle shows that Dogg never knew what
hit him - but he'll know WHO.

Kevin Kelly interviews Hardcore Holly. Last night at SummerSlam, they had
the golden slot in the Tag Team Turmoil match, but when they spent more
time fighting amongst themselves than the Acolytes, they ended up losing
the match. Holly says that tonight there will be a special invitational
battle of the Super Heavyweights - and it's time for his cousin to nut up
or shut up.

CRASH HOLLY v. HARDCORE HOLLY - They're badmouthing each other all the way
to the lockup. Quick enough, we're out of the ring, then out into the
crowd, then I'm thinking this isn't worth recapping. Much like last week,
one man would gain the advantage, then stop to make sure his cousin is
okay, leading the other man to take control. Repeat, making sure to move
further out of the arena with each move. We get about three minutes of
this before the camera cable runs out.

Kevin Kelly takes us to the stills of Triple H's attack on Stone Cold
Steve Austin's knees - ligament and tendon damage, we are told. MANKIND
joins Kelly, telling Triple H that he's made some dumb decisions of late,
taking his knee out with a sledgehammer, taking out Austin, "I've had my
problems with the Rattlesnake, but dammit, the guy's practically
singlehandedly funded my retirement!", and taking out Ross. Well, he's
proven he can give out the punishment - tonight we'll find out how well he
can take it.

2.5

5.5

Al Snow, curled up, rocks and cries. He misses his pooch!

WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW & UNDERTAKER & PAUL BEARER make their way to the
commentary table and displace Cole.

THROUGH HELL FIRE AND BRIMSTONE IT'S KANE v. MIDIAN & VISCERA - This match
is originally scheduled for "one round" before Lilian Garcia corrects
herself and says "one fall" - okay, I'm going to say it - WHO'D SHE SLEEP
WITH TO GET THIS GIG? - arrrgh. Speaking of arrrrgh, I challenge the WWF
to pick a character name spelling for Dennis Knight and STICK WITH IT.
At least this week the chyron matches his tights. Ever wonder what a
match sounded like with four colour commentators and nobody on
play-by-play? Well, friends, it ain't pretty. We make about 90 seconds
of action before the ACOLYTES walk down to the ring to ... watch?
Undertaker calls Midian & Viscera "methodical killers," which is good for
a chuckle. Viscera hits a nice Samoan Drop on Kane, which is good for an
"Oh!!" Finally, we fast forward to the hot tag - to X-Pac? Spinning heel
kick actually puts Viscera down - and it's time for a bronco buster. The
Acolytes, meanwhile, have made their way over to Kane and have pulled him
to the floor. Meanwhile, X-Pac takes MIDIAN down and gives HIM a bronco
buster. But he's apparently forgotten about Viscera, who splashes him,
then lands on him for the pin. (4:17) Kane is in to look after his
friend, but it's too late. Are all these former Ministry guys...naah...

Hey, Mr. Ass is still looking for Chyna. And he's decided to look while
he's WALKING!

SummerSlam Encore promo #2

The Fink looks for some approval from Chris Jericho - "you need a LOT of
work - but with some more intense physical training, and some more
studying of my inspirational motivational manuals I might be able to save
you a job on my new show - you know we have Monday Night RAW is JERICHO,
how does THURSDAY NIGHT FINKDOWN sound to you?"

RAW is WAR is brought to you by Castrol Motor Oily, WWF: The Music, Vol. 3
(available at all NRM's) and 10-10-220!

KING ASS walks to the ring. "Hey King, did you see Mr. Ass kiss that big
woman's butt last night?" Ass asks Chyna to stop running from him and
come down to the ring. Strangely enough, she does.

2.8

5.2

He asks her
what kind of joke she's trying to pull. She tells HIM that he must be
thinking out his ass again. "I'm not playing around! You give or I'll
take." "Fine, let's see what you got!" But JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET
is quickly out with a guitar to kabong over Chyna's head. MISS KITTY has
another guitar, but Ass takes it from her before she can hand it to
Jarrett, and breaks it over *Jarrett*. Debra is out to scold Kitty and
help bring Jarrett to as we see replays of both guitar shots.

There's the Rock! And once again, he is WALKING!

The highest rated cable program makes the jump to prime time network
programming Thursday when SMACK DOWN! premieres! On UPN!

Those Magic ads aren't too bad - we'll see how I like 'em in three months,
though

Let Us Take You Back to Earlier Tonight - Triple H breaks Ross' arm, and
Shane signs the title match in the main event

THE ROCK joins the commentary team. It's official: we are now watching
THE WORLD ENTRANCE FEDERATION. "Who's booking this crap?" says the Rock.
"I love shoot interviews that aren't supposed to be shoot interviews,"
says Herb Kunze. And now, to put ANOTHER level of fun'n'games on this
match, out comes SKIPPY to "No Chance in Hell" (the World Entrance
Federation) - turns out he's the Special Guest Referee in this match.

TRIPLE H v. MANKIND for the WWF Championship - Triple H is alone with
Chyna still feeling the effects of her kabong. I have a tie just like
Mankind's, you know. H starts punching away before the bell. Rock: "Who
is booking this crap? The Rock against Billy Gunn. The Rock against
Gangrel. I mean, next week the Rock will be laying the smack down on the
Brooklyn Brawler, for Chrissakes." Mankind reverses, and lays in with
rights. Running knee to the head on the seated Triple H in the corner.
Into the opposite corner, off the ropes with a bulldog. Mankind covers,
but Shane chooses that moment to warn Rock about getting involved in this
match, conveniently avoiding a count. Mankind's ALREADY going for his
sock. But the Mandible claw goes down deep into the gullet of SHANE and
not to Triple H. Shane ends up going over the top rope. Mankind is
distracted just long enough for Triple H to try for the Pedigree, but
Mankind backdrops him. Triple H tries for a Sunset flip, but Mankind
stops taht by putting on the mandible claw. Here's THAT SLUT CHYNA, but
Mankind puts down Triple H and puts the claw on HER - then takes her
outside the ring. There's an underhook into a DDT - the crowd counts to
10 but referee "BLIND" EARL HEBNER is there so late Triple H can kick out
after 2. Mankind boots Triple H out of the ring and follows. Triple H
reverses a whip, sending him into Chyna, who hiptosses him into the STEEL
steps. Triple H takes Mankind to the commentary table. Mankind wanders
over to a conveniently placed chair, but Triple H

3.4

6.4

kicks it into his
face. Repeated rights by Triple H. Rolled him back into the ring, Mankind
manages a back elbow, and a headbutt. Triple H with a neckbreaker, but
only 2. There's a facecrusher for 2. Triple H takes the sock off his
hand and throws it out. Umm, can't he still do that move without the
sock? Oh well - repeated stomping and then Mankind is driven into the
corner shoulder first. Rollup for 2. Mankind is punching when he gets
back up (Rock: "Mankind's coming back") but he falls after a high knee
(Rock: "Mankind sucks") 2 count. Right, right, right, right, right,
right, right, right, finally Hebner pulls Helmsley off of him. Time for a
brief discussion between the two. Mankind tries to get in an shot, but
Helmsley lets loose with forearms. Mankind manages another shot, but
Helmsley put him into the corner. However, Mankind clotheslines out for
2. Headbutt from Mankind. Mankind clotheslines him over the top, and he
follows over the top. Chyna gets on the apron to distract Hebner. Shane,
who's FINALLY come to, takes a chair to Mankind's back - it doesn't do
much to Mankind, who turns around - but it DOES distract him long enough
to take a chair from TRIPLE H to the head. Then Triple H waffles the Rock
one for good measure. Yow! Shane rolls Mankind into the ring, then pulls
out Hebner and ko's him with a right cross. Triple H, meanwhile, hits a
Pedigree and Shane makes the count. 1, 2, 3. Ladies and gentlemen, we
have a new WWF Champion. (8:43)

Chyna is all smiles - hey, remember when SHE wanted to be Champion? Seems
like only a couple weeks ago. Replay of the chair shots on Mankind
- and the Rock. Pedigree, cover. Triple H poses, then walks back up
the ramp. Now, it's his time.