Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Bread Crumbs: Random Bits

I was privy to a mixed early report on the new Thai Bamboo from eager beaver Alex and his significant other, Steve. Alex said his Pad Thai was "excellent" and "just what I was hoping for" and commented that the decor was "wild...over the top."

Steve, on the other hand had never eaten Thai, and somehow expected that his Cashew Chicken was supposed to be a noodle dish. When it arrived without noodles, he thought they'd forgotten them. He said he waited "half an hour" (um, I doubt it) before the server returned to explain that the Cashew Chicken did NOT actually involve noodles, but offered to bring him some anyway after he threw down a queeny bitch trip. "I was so upset, I wasn't even hungry anymore. I was practically in tears" he over-dramatized to me later that evening.

I'm leaning heavily toward Alex's viewpoint, since Steve is notoriously persnickety and his opinion counts for naught (just kidding, Steve, you can put your claws away now). I'm letting the place cool down a week or two before I finally make my way in there to indulge in Swimming Rama and write the place up. Can't wait!

As if Jamba Juice weren't already truly fantastic enough, they've got some exciting new things they'll be throwing into the mix toward the end of the month. My favorite morning Jamba Juicemistress (oh, I'm bad with names sometimes) filled me in this morning with some good news. They're adding a bunch of new "breakfast smoothies" that have added goodies like banana chunks and granola to create some thicker drinks that are filling enough to act as the most important meal of the day. Bonus! They're bringing in some new baked goods as well including mini-loaves of honey zucchini bread. Honey zucchini bread. Honey zucchini bread. Yum.

Also in the healthy-yet-somehow-still-delicious department is the deli at Pilgrim's Market on 4th. When, I popped in the other day to pick up some Ginger-Lemon Yogi Tea, my tummy started a-rumbling so I strolled through the deli aisle, poking and prodding until I finally decided on an organic hummus wrap, which was also, without a doubt, an orgasmic hummus wrap (sorry).

It was so deliciously satanic with garlic that afterwards at karaoke, I felt truly sorry for whomever had to deal with the microphone after I was through gassing it. The fresh onion wore the mask and pointed the gun, and the crisp lettuce, avocado, and sun dried tomato drove the getaway car. For four dollars, all I had to do was throw in a mini-size cheddar Kettle Chips and I was fully satisfied for a mere crispy Lincoln.

They also serve wraps and sandwiches with organic meats, egg salad and tuna salad, and they offer a bazillion other good-for-your-spleen deli specialties. Oh, and if you hadn't heard, they're expanding into the old Liquidation World spot next door, and if they're smart, they'll put in a nice little cafe with a seating area.Once a week, the mailman stuffs my box with a handful of fast food and pizza ads that usually go directly into the fireplace. This week, I kinda peeked by accident and what did I see but an Arby's ad touting the new fish sandwich. All you have to do is tell me something is new and I'm right on it.

|The verdict: Folks, don't waste your $2. The previously frozen fish was room temperature, mushy-mushy and flavorless, possibly not cooked long enough despite the golden brown exterior. Mysterious then, that the cheese slice was melted beyond all reasonable recognition. Only one thing can explain this sad state of affairs: the microwave. Ugh!

To make the situation even more sickening, they had the nerve to slip a slimy tomato slice all up in that white-ass, tartar-soaked bun. Oh no you didn't! I sho 'nuff didn't see no DAMN tomato in that coupon magazine! Recommendation: stick with Micky D's for a good old fashioned Filet-o-Fish.