your silence will not protect you

Post-Summer Solstice

I haven’t been the greatest at posting these European blogs…or beginning to even write them. I was determined to write all of the blogs about my trip on my trip because of how much time we spent traveling. As per usual, I don’t follow through with my plans.

I wrote consistently for the first two days. Afterwards, I just wrote lists of things I didn’t want to forget because I slept every time we traveled. When I got home, I was too exhausted to bother with writing the blogs and a month later, I am just fucking lazy. I’ll finish writing the blogs eventually because it’s important to me, but until then…I’ll be in the USofA, rotting away.

Since I’ve returned to the states, my life has been incredibly drab. It’s not because the excitement and glamour of Europe has dulled my regular, old life, but rather, I’m in limbo right now. Hell, I’m always in limbo. I should rename my blog “Life in Limbo” or something lame like that. (Speaking of my blog, I’ve been meaning to redesign it again. Another thing to add to my To-Do list.)

The reason I feel like I’m in limbo is because I am very lost when it comes to what the fuck I’m doing with myself. I don’t have a strict schedule so my days are all over the place, and I’m not the greatest fan of that. I miss school for my hour-by-hour itineraries. Fortunately, I’m resuming school in a couple of weeks, so order shall be restored to my life! Until then, I’ll be in limbo.

Some things I’ve been doing while I’m in limbo include working! Yes, shockingly, I got a job!

I was dreading it at first but so far, it’s not so bad. It’s boring compared to my old job in the fast food world, but at least I don’t reek of burgers nor am I covered in milkshakes anymore! At this new job, I can actually look cute! Which can be a little annoying sometimes because then I have to actually think about what to wear, and what I have to wear isn’t really my style but…whatever. I’m working.

I’m hardly working, though. I have two jobs right now but I’m hardly working five hours a week. When I’m not working, which is 168 hours a week, I am rotting away on the couch. I haven’t sat on the couch this much since my junior year in high school! My hometown friends are living in other states right now, which isn’t really an excuse for not seeing anyone because I mean, people are around. I have friends at school and I can see my hometown friends on weekends…I can also text them. Some people have thrown parties or invited me to do things but I’ve just…been extremely antisocial I guess? My guy friend has been calling me since the end of May, but I have yet to call him back or acknowledge that he’s even called. I was also supposed to send a friend in Florida a letter by now. We were going to be penpals! I’m an asshole.

During the 168 hours I spend on the couch, I’ve been watching movies and tons of Netflix. As of thus far, I’ve caught up on Scandal (which is a mess), watched Love (it’s just oh-kay), and reached season 5 of Buffy (this is my new addiction. Season 3 is my favorite thus far). I plan on watching Orange is the New Black next while beginning season 5 of Buffy simultaneously.

Okay, I lied. I was being a little dramatic. I spend about 160 hours couch potato-ing and 8 hours either moving into my apartment or learning how to cook. Those 8 hours of my week make me feel more adult-y and independent.

It wasn’t until this past weekend, Father’s Day Weekend, that I began divvying my 160 hours into couch potato-ing and reading. I read on the couch, but it doesn’t count as couch potato-ing because reading is mentally stimulating.

In four days, I finished Gone Girl and Attachments by Rainbow Rowell. Gone Girl was…weird. I didn’t particularly enjoy it because I didn’t find it that suspenseful and none of the characters were likeable. I really enjoyed Rainbow’s book because I’m always a sucker for romance novels and I enjoyed how this book was written, although I didn’t like the lead character much. He was kinda lame.

Next, I’m going to finally finish Trumpet, which I started over two years ago. I got the audiobook, and I tend to finish audiobooks easily because you can listen to them as you drive, get ready for the day, and clean (which I really should do. My room at home is still a mess between college and Europe). I have a bunch of other unfinished books to read, including, but not limited to, The Opposite of Loneliness, Sex and God, Baghdad Burning, Jane Eyre, She Came Undone, Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, and Female Chauvinist Pigs, which I haven’t even began yet, but I bought it two years ago. Yes, all the others I listed, I’ve only partially read. As you can see, I suffer from leaving things unfinished, like my European blog posts and my forever messy room.

Anyway, here’s a list of the books I actuallycompleted last summer! I was driving a ton between home and school, so I got most of my reading done thanks to the wonderful invention of audiobooks. I left some comments next to the books in case someone was interested.

Books from Summer 2015

Crash books (3) by Nicole Williams (just okay, but sappy as hell, so I loved it)

Along for the Ride by Sarah Dessen (I reread this because it’s summery and sappy and teen angsty)

I Hate My Selfie by Shane Dawson (enjoyable)

Some random, free erotica book from Amazon (90% of Amazon’s free books are erotica. They’re quite terrible and forgettable, but they’re enjoyable in the moment)

Annie on My Mind by Nancy Garden (I started it in the winter of 2014)

Yes Please by Amy Poehler (AMAZING)

Bossypants by Tina Fey (not as amazing as Amy’s audiobook, but good)

1/2 of Judy Blume’s In the Unlikely Event, 1/2 A Thousand Splendid Suns, 1/2 Patti Smith’s Just Kids (they were all boring to me)

My Drunk Kitchen Guide by Hannah Harto (I began this in February…it’s sad that it took me so long to finish it when it’s not even a real book. It’s a fucking cookbook!)

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling (meh. Just okay. I’m no longer a great fan of hers though.)

The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins (a rather lame read…after reading Gone Girl most recently, I refuse to read any more books with “Girl” in the title and I also want to avoid infidelity and marital relationships.)

So, there you have it! I hope it is helpful if you’re making a summer reading list. How’ve your summers been thus far? Lemme know in the comments below! I know I haven’t replied to comments lately but I will! I am slowly but surely making progress out of limbo!

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2 thoughts on “Post-Summer Solstice”

Hi Vic, my summer is going alright. I’m going to Cali in July and Toronto in August yay. Other then that got more ink. And that’s about it. Been staying at my parents place while they do balcony repairs on my building.