"Well Hello! Miss Chips!"

An end of term video should be the opportunity for pupils to look back on the academic year and recall favourite memories. But an incident at St Pimple's has cast a shadow over such a video. Home economics teacher Miss Chips, 21, included a scene where she pleasures herself with a whisk. "I am mortified" said the shapely Miss Chips "I never meant for the scene to appear in this video. I was making a movie for the school governors, but somehow they both got mixed up."

Sir Graeme Fowler, chairman of the board of Governors, said "We are obviously disappointed with Miss chips. we expected to see a video of her and the whisk. Instead we got 7C singing 'All Things Bright And Beautiful'. We have warned her to be more careful in future."

Miss Chips has managed to keep her job. In fact she has been given a promotion and a pay rise.

Make Earl Grey's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

Back In Gear HQ, London: Jeremy Clarkson BACK to present live shows to avoid paying out £10million in refunds to angry fans. Jeremy Clarkson will front the 'Back in Gear' Live World Tour, with Richard Hammond and James May, which is set to make more...

Our intrepid Weeki Leeks reporter had triumphed again with the following revelations. Thirty something years ago a young Scottish person named Nicholas Sturgeon had a sex change operation performed by Dr Herman Clitterman in his clandestine surgery...

St Martin's Well-Man clinic in Newcastle is proving to be a leading beacon in testicular cancer awareness in the United Kingdom. From its early foundations in the 1980's till present time, the clinic has been growing from two or three out-patients a...

The BBC' s human resources department has admitted changing its job application form for the first time in 50 years. Wendy Attenborough, Head of HR, explained that the BBC set up a panel of Stake Holders in November last year, in light of paedophile...

David Cameron's garden at number 10 could be paying for itself soon. Over the last few years he has added a tree house, bouncy castle, pitch and put, croquet area, revolving greenhouse, water chute, Tarzan swing, bowling lawn, bandstand, pigeon shed,...

The seven largest UK political parties have announced they will partake in a tag-team death match before the results of the looming election are revealed.
The event will be staged at Wembley Stadium and fights will involve key members of the Blues...

Ancient Rocker Duane Hyman and guitarist for the band Megasauras held a news conference today at a secret hotel in London at the request of the band's manager Rocky Road.
Duane's life commitment has been to take everything to the max. He was the o...

As morning broke, the only police officer on the small Isle of Siel managed to track down the whereabouts of janitor Wee Speadie who went missing last night when looking for a missing boy. As you will recall, the boy was sent home from school yesterd...