Be It Ever So Messy, There's No Place Like Home: The "Adventures" of a 50-Something Southern California Mom - who used to be interesting... and her teenage daughter.

December 2009

December 25, 2009

...and yesterday, after five solid days of cleaning, unpacking, cleaning and cooking, I was too pooped to pop.

As you can see from the photo here, the house is once again resembling our home, and it feels good.

When my daughter was a first grader, she had a revelation. She's always known that her mom and dad come from different countries and celebrate different holidays... so she concluded that since Daddy is British and Mommy's American, that Chanukah was an American holiday and Christmas was British. It's easy to understand how she got that idea.

Christmas is an important holiday for my husband and over the years, we've developed our own traditions. One of them is to call his family in Wales. Another is to watch the Queen's annual Christmas speech, which is available on the Internet. I cook British style food on Christmas, set the table with Christmas crackers and end the meal by steaming a Christmas pudding.

Back in September, when we were replacing our roof, my husband had a brainstorm: while the roof was off, he was able to string HDMI and ethernet cables throughout the house. So this year, we were able to access the Internet on our new big screen TV. So we began our day sipping coffee at 7:00 AM (3:00 PM UK time) with the Queen...

I'm looking forward to watching the Doctor Who Christmas special when it airs on BBC America tomorrow.

Christmas 2009 has been a good one for us... and all the sweeter for having our home back.

December 23, 2009

It took me days to pack up our kitchen and dining room when we started the home repairs and renovation. So I should not have been surprised that it took another four days to try to put everything back in place.

The house is like a big jigsaw puzzle... and there are still pieces missing. The microwave hood could not be installed because the venting that had been in place for the old hood came out when we removed the old cabinets.

"They'll put a new one in," my husband assured me.

No. The microwave installation I paid for when I bought the thing at Lowe's does not include venting. It is supposed to be already in place, and at the time I purchased the appliance, it was -- so I did not think about it again.

The time to have done it would have been BEFORE the new cabinets were installed, or maybe when the roof was off. My husband has been trying all kinds of options to do it now, and so far, none of them fit. So the new microwave is sitting in a corner of the dining room while the old one is taking up space on the counter and I continue to cook without a hood, which is okay as long as it's temporary but I have reason to fear that I'll be stumbling over that appliance for another six months.

On the upside: getting our big comfy chairs back in the living room was like seeing an old friend. Ditto with the dining room table, chairs and china cabinet. And I felt a real sense of accomplishment when I unloaded the last of the large cartons taking up space in the home office.

I'm not posting any pictures yet: We still need curtains (we've had big plastic sheets duct-taped to our windows since the renovation began). I've been shopping and have yet to find something I like that's affordable. My friend Mary Ellen (who is a brilliant seamstress) has offered to make them for me, and I may take her up on that... which means we're not likely to have them until after January.

I also have two large framed lithographs and a mirror that have to be put up and I'm not sure where they will go (the wall one of them was on is no longer there and there's a new wall above the fireplace). The living space is a little cramped because we had to move a chair to make room for my husband's Christmas tree we purchased Sunday night. It's still bare because we've been so busy putting stuff away that there's been no time to dig up the ornaments. Gareth tells me it's traditional to wait until Christmas Eve anyway, so I guess we'll be decorating the tree tomorrow.

Christmas shopping? Haven't done it, so there's nothing to put under the tree. I never got around to sending cards either... that's just the way this year has gone. I guess we'll take care of both those activities tomorrow. Thank goodness for e-cards.

In the meantime, my sister and her family are driving down to Los Angeles tonight so they can spend the holiday with her mother-in-law... but first, they will stop here for a holiday dinner. This will be their first glimpse of the nearly finished renovation and my only opportunity to see them before they leave for Cuba. So I will be spending my day cooking (which I enjoy) and cleaning (which I dread - but at least, the living room/kitchen are easier now).

And even though I don't sound that way, I'm actually pretty happy. We got through it and once my sister gets here, we can all relax and enjoy the holiday... and the fact that this crappy year is coming to an end.

December 17, 2009

Eight months in the making, it really does FEEL like we've got a new house (the front part of the structure, anyway). On Saturday, our furniture will be shuffled out of the garage and back into place, along with dozens of cartons of contents that need to be unpacked -- so it also feels like we're just moving in.

Our home network was down while the floor was being laid, so this is my first opportunity to share these with you:

I guess I got used to living with the ugly blue-gray epoxy garage stuff that's on our concrete slab, because I decided that gray would be the perfect color for the new tile in our kitchen and dining area. (Actually, the very dark gray of the bitumen we laid below the cabinets is what prompted that - I ended up thinking it looked very nice next to the cherry stain).

December 10, 2009

This month's Yahoo! MotherBoard topic is "Holiday Stress"... where do I begin?

The topic of the call with my parents was Chanukah.

"It begins Friday night, you know."

YIKES.

It's hard enough to get ready for the December holidays when you only have one to celebrate. It's doubly hard to balance my family's Jewish celebration with Christmas (my husband's holiday, and the only religious event he feels he absolutely HAS to acknowledge).

This year...? I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

We usually celebrate the holidays in the UK with my husband's family, or here in California with mine. This year, there's no money for travel -- the wood-eating fungus that damaged our home (and savings account) took care of that. So we're staying put... but MY family has other plans.

When the Obama administration announced a new policy to make it easier for Cuban-Americans to visit family members on the island, my dad decided it was time to take my mom back to Havana for the first time in over 50 years. He scheduled it for the middle of December. While he was at it, he decided to spring for tickets for my 22-year-old niece and 20-year-old nephew.

My sister realized that if she wanted to see her two eldest children over the holidays, she would have to go too. So this year, she and her husband are blitzing down to SoCal for Christmas with his mom and then back up to northern California, where they will catch their flight to Havana. My only opportunity to see them this holiday is on December 23, when they will be passing through. I've invited them to a holiday dinner.

I haven't even begun to think about that yet... because our house is still a construction zone.

The last six months have been an exercise in low expectations. There's been little in the way of entertaining. No parties. No sleepovers for my daughter's friends. No kaffeeklatsches with the other moms (unless we meet at Starbucks).

The major work on the kitchen was completed just before Thanksgiving, but there is a lot of tweaking to be done. The finish on the new cabinets isn't wearing well and some touch-ups and more protective coatings need to be applied. The microwave hood and cabinet hardware are on hold until then.

And then there is the little matter of our floor. Until we install a new one, it is silly to haul out the living room chairs, dining room set, wine rack and china cabinet contents. And we have yet to decide on shelving for the piles of books currently taking up our office/guest bedroom.

The good news is that we settled on flooring last week. The bad news is that between my sprained foot and the nasty bug that befell the entire family over the weekend, we lost ground on the home improvements we wanted to finish before the floor is put in. We need another weekend... and my husband needs to accept the idea that he has to lower HIS expectations on what we can conceivably finish.

"I think it's OK to save the painting for AFTER the holiday," I told him. "After all, we've always just covered things up when we've painted before."

He nodded, as if to agree. But I think he still thinks we're going to accomplish more than is humanly possible this weekend.

So the floor tile -- which was originally set to be installed yesterday -- has been delayed until Monday, with a crew coming in tomorrow to prep our damaged concrete slab in the kitchen and dining area. We're allowing two days for that job.

The carpet installers arrive on Wednesday to do the living room and hallway. That's also when we've got the cabinet stainer returning to do his thing in the kitchen. I've scheduled the appliance guys to put in the hood next Friday. This means next Saturday and Sunday will be taken up with moving furniture and unpacking boxes...

... and shopping for a Christmas tree.

Which brings us back to the holiday at hand. The house isn't the only thing that's been occupying my time of late. I work at home, and I have clients who are as anxious as I to get focused on the holidays -- which means the time is NOW to finish all their outstanding work.

And the sprained foot was just the latest bit of health stuff I've had to deal with, too. Both my daughter and I have dental issues that MUST be taken care of this month, as our insurance deductibles go up in 2010. She and I both have appointments next week.

Where was I? Oh yes. The holiday at hand. Chanukah. I've bought my daughter exactly ONE gift (instead of the usual eight). I haven't purchased a thing for my husband. I don't even know which box is holding our menorah -- or if I can access it.

"I might have to buy a new menorah," I told my husband. "It's easier than trying to find the one we have."

He groaned. "Didn't you buy a second one last year?" he asked.

I might have. Even so, it is just as lost to us as the old one.

My husband gave me a look that said "Why are you wasting money on another menorah when we already have two?" I wanted to tell him that over 20 years, I've spent a lot less money on menorahs than he's spent on Christmas trees, but I wisely kept that to myself.

Like everything else this year, our winter holidays will be a haphazard affair. As we make room for the floor prep tonight, I'll look for our menorahs. If I can't find one, I'll pick up another tomorrow so we'll be able to light a candle. I'll do a swift run through Target for Chanukah gifts and deal with Christmas on Monday. And at some point over the next week, I'll dig up my holiday recipes and plan dinner for the 23rd.

Most of all, I'm going to remind myself to relax. So we're not going to have a picture-perfect holiday. But we have each other, we're healthy... and (fingers crossed!) our house will be a home again. And that will be the best gift of all.

This post is part of a monthly carnival I participate in as a member of Yahoo!'s MotherBoard. Check out the rest of the carnival at: