Monday, November 23, 2009

Inhale/Exhale

It was very a much a lazy weekend with a drop of temporary drama added. It started with the Rob Zombie concert on Friday, which I THOUGHT was on Saturday night, so I ended up rushing home to shower and change before Dibs and Alex showed up. The concert was loud, gnarly and cool. Unfortunately, my damn camera battery died in the middle of the show at the most need time of course. I was trying to shoot Rob but he runs around so much it’s hard to get a pic of him. At one point I was following him with my camera and he just disappeared. I looked at Dibs and said “Dammit, where’d he go?” Dibs hits me on the arm and says turn around and wholly fuck Rob Zombie was right behind me with a hand held spotlight. I’m trying to shoot him with my camera and the “battery exhausted” light comes on and the camera shuts itself off…Still determined to get a pic of him, I whip out my phone and try to snap a photo and all I ended up getting was a pic of a bright light and a black background. Oh well, another time I guess. Tried to meet up with Dayna and Kelly afterward but Kelly wasn’t feeling well, so they packed it in early, so I went to bed.

Saturday I agreed to take Dayna to the airport at 9a. She’s flying back to Lubbock to spend the holiday with her fam. As I’m going to pick her up I get a call from one the girls that works with me at the airport. She’s crying and asking me if I would work for her since she was robbed while working her other job in Minneapolis. I agreed and ended up working 2-9p at the airport. Once I was home, settled in my jammies etc, I spent a couple of hours on FB and arguing on the phone with my ex Paul. We talked about my two jobs and how I don’t stick up for myself and how I need to be handling the current situation that I’m dealing with-more on that later. Then “the Dude” I noticed chimed in with a few of what I considered harmless comments, then it started getting nasty. He made a few “private” and nasty comments about my health. I didn’t understand why he was being such a jerk so I tried calling him- no answer. So I texted him and was asking why he was being a jerk and he came back with a nasty reply.. I was surprised but too tired to deal with it so I deleted him off my friends, just in case he decided to continue posting and sadly went to bed. Granted this has been a 6 month drama between “the Dude” and I and I have to say with all the bull etc I think we do understand each other and how to push each other’s buttons. We do fight a lot, I stick up for myself and I think we’ve come to realize that unless it gets terrible it’ll never be over between us. Thing is I adore him..period. However, there is a limit to what I’ll put up with and it’s getting to that point.

Next morning I posted something and apparently a few people were now privy to a health issue I wanted to remain private..So I ended up explaining etc. My brother still/does want to take “Dude” out and shoot him for being so damn mean over nothing. It seemed to everyone that he was jealous, even though he denies it. “the Dude” calls me and I let him have it. First thing out of his mouth was “I’m sorry”, which is what it should have been. He thought I attacked him so he reciprocated, which I thought was bull. I didn't think there was any part of what I said that could remotely be construed as "attacking" or even being negative.I told him that he should know better, that’s not part of my MO. I asked if he’d been drinking and if he remembered the things he said and the answer was he remembered some. He ended up apologizing 4 times before I let it go. His excuse was that he’s been dealing with some things, he’d been drinking, he saw on FB that I was arguing with my ex and he’s convinced that we are still in love. I made a harmless comment, he took it as an attack, got pissed and attacked back. In the end we ended our conversation on a good note, checked in with each other later that evening and then again before we both went to bed. Which I thought was nice.

After I hung up with “the Dude” I ate, and slept. I don’t think I got out of bed all day with the exception of going for a brief run because what I ate seemed to be weighing me down.. Later I caught up with Kat to go see Boondock Saints II but we decided to sit and chat at Denny’s instead. I love my friends.

I planned on getting most if not the entire house clean but fell into a coma mid afternoon due to the large amounts of eats I had. It was a fairly lazy weekend. I told “the Dude” I would have rather spent all day Sunday in bed with him, eating, snuggling and watching movies…he really didn’t comment on that…

As for this next week, I work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday at both jobs, plan on going over to my parents for T-day, Ryan’s and my traditional T-day movie, then to “the Dude’s” to share my T-day left over’s and celebrate T-day. I’m a firm believer no one having to spend a holiday alone. Then Friday off.

But between here and there, I do need to get 2 loads of laundry folded and put away, the entire house vacuumed and dusted before I can consider doing anything.