Date: Sun, 17 May 2009 05:29:24 -0700 (PDT)
From: Matt Doesburg
Subject: Toni The Book Chapter 8
That night we partied like wild. Although the reason of our partying was
lying in a hospital bed, we were mad for happiness. She could have been
dead. I for one did not know what I would have done when that had been the
case. So we spent our night at the Gumbo Shoppe at the request of Mel and
after that we raided Dan O'Brian. John joined us and thanks to his
connections, it was the first time that I did not have to queue up before
getting tables.
I do not know how the others felt; I had the impression that I was given a
new chance. I did not know yet what I would do with it but I was grateful
to get it. That night Mel was more beautiful than ever. Terry was at last
integrated into our parentless family as a full member. Eric got stone
drunk. Mel told me over and over again that that was the first time she
ever saw him that way. As if he would have needed an excuse, we all were
stoned out of our minds. The next day I woke up at six o'clock...in the
afternoon.
Feeling guilty, I called the hospital right away, only to be told that Toni
had not woken up during the day. But everything indicated that she was
well and recovering had set in. During the evening we had a more subdued
dinner and afterwards we had a meeting in my suite. We decided that Mel and
Eric would fly home after a last visit to the hospital. Terry and I would
wait until Toni would be recovered enough to discuss what our next steps
would be. Mel firstly wanted nothing more as to stay too, but as there were
some commitments at Eric Jr's school in New England she agreed.
The following weeks were altogether positive. When Toni saw me with Terry
on our first visit together, she cried and hugged her. When she started to
apologize for the scene on Jackson Square, Terry silenced her by laying her
hand on her mouth. I from my side was surprised that she even remembered
it. Toni got slowly rid of her bandages and was on the way back to
recovery. As soon as she was a bit better, I was occasionally complimented
out of the room. The reason was always that the two sisters had girl
matters to discuss.
During one of their private talks, one of the doctors took me apart. He
asked me whether I knew that Toni was a drug addict. I told him that I knew
and how she had become one. He said that during the stay in the hospital
they kept her on methadone. This was a condition that might last for ever,
when she would not try to get rid of the addiction by detoxication. He also
told me to inform myself about such programs, in order not to be unprepared
when it would get nasty.
After 10 days we were allowed to make our visits longer. Now we were able
to get a little bit of the story together. All of it would have to wait
until Toni would volunteer to tell everything. The death of Runa was a
terrible blow for her. When she regained her old sober view of life she
admitted, that the girl was probably doomed from the beginning. She had
told Toni several times that she was convinced that she would die before
she was twenty five.
Toni was very reluctant to talk about what had happened though. She only
told us that she had met Runa shortly before she mentioned her to me. She
had really liked the girl, although she was wild and drifting into gothic
and BDSM circles. She also was using as many drugs as she could lay her
hands on. Toni wanted to help her. She had seen that under the wildness was
a highly talented piano player. Somewhere she got the crazy idea, that she
could help her better when she would know all facets of Toni's life. That
was why she started hanging out with her and also began taking drugs.
The small quantities that were planned got out of hand rather soon. As Runa
was very much into the Maso side of BDSM she started to act as a pet and
Toni played along. She also found out that Runa had started to work in a
BDSM club as a gothic dancer. She suspected that, because of her drug
addiction, she would slip into prostitution. Trying to protect her also in
those surroundings, they took their pet game to the club as an act. The
club however got under the influence of Horace. That's how the first raid
and its results could be explained. Being there had them automatically
registered as prostitutes. Until that moment Toni actually had never made
sex for money. For he police that made no differences. Runa and she were
the only ones not on record and that was rectified after the raid.
Horace, who now had additional recorded prostitutes on his hands, did not
make proposals. He also did not ask any questions, but hijacked them simply
to the club that I had visited later on. At our first meeting, she was
still convinced that she was on top of everything. Now she regretted her
attitude that had made things so much worse for everybody. Our hands were
bound by her silent consent to the situation. She asked us again for
forgiveness for the second meeting. That afternoon both she and Runa were
drugged out of their minds. When she saw me with Terry, she was convinced
that I had exchanged her for her youngest sister. She did not volunteer
information on the last day at the mansion. She only said that, when she
woke up after the gang war, her first thought was to ask for me. When I
came within an hour she had known that everything would become OK.
New Orleans now looked as great as ever again. Now I was happy to show
Terry one of my all time favorite cities. We made tours on the Mississippi
Steamers, and we visited some of the plantation houses. We went with a
musician I knew to Saturday evening dances in Cajun Country. Fayetteville
was visited and after Terry found out about Cajun food she loved it so
much, that I got an idea.
In the Sonesta I had a kitchen in the suite and we hired a personal
cook. She instructed us in Cajun as well as in Creole cooking. It was great
to go shopping with her on the spices market. Some of the stand holders
even recognized me. They ruined my day though, with questions about the
pretty lady that used to accompany me. Closer to the mound of the
Mississippi, we bought real fresh fish directly from the incoming fisher
boats.
After we made our first dishes we took some of them with us to the
hospital. Toni loved them and instantly started to ask the medical personal
whether she could go to the Sonesta. She was however in no state to leave
the hospital, not even in a wheel chair. I got the OK however to have our
cook prepare a Sunday dinner in the station kitchen at the hospital and
everybody was looking away that evening when Toni got her first wine since
her hospitalization.
Friends from the city and visiting musicians made the suite into a dining
and partying zone within a week. When the Tulane University found out that
I was in town, they asked me to give some lectures about the music
business. I made some rather controversial guest appearances though. I did
not lecture about finances and down to earth marketing, I told them about
the importance of the musicians as human beings. In my opinion, this fact
was in the process of losing its importance. I wanted to show then how I
had come to music but in New Orleans it was impossible to get the old
records together so I promised the students that I would that another time.
Terry was present during one of these lectures and told me later that she
was mightily impressed. She also asked me whether I would be able to give
her a job in the business. As she had studied Anglo American law in
Australia, I told her that LA lay open for her. During all these activities
the later part of the afternoon however, was always reserved for the visit
to the hospital.
A meeting, in which the police, the agency as well as Terry and I
participated, was also in Toni's hospital room. First of all the police
told us that they had blocked all information on the case. They also
informed us that some of the attackers had been arrested. The real
initiators were still unknown and that was usual in such cases. They were
also relatively sure, that the bosses of the other party would not try to
get the surviving girls into their power.
The chief of detectives said, that the whole affair must have originated in
the club. Some of the girls might have seen or heard something. That is
why they probably sent their troops in with the order to kill
everybody. These men in the background would know by now however that the
remaining girls were no threat to them. If they would have been, they would
have talked to the police already. Their drug habits now were probably
their life savers. They all were too far gone to notice anything and this
information was also duly spread in the appropriate scenes.
After the meeting with the authorities the first bandages came off. One of
the first to go was her head. It was apparent that her shaven head had at
least prevented more severe injuries. If she would have had long hair, it
would certainly have burned when the flames hit her body. I did not want to
think about the consequences of that. We talked about the next steps. I
proposed to get her to a clinic in California, as soon as the doctors would
allow it. That was considered to be a good idea. To minimize the risk, that
the mob would be able to find out where she was, the police would treat it
as an undercover transfer. When the time came we flew her out on a charter
to the pacific coast. The clinic was reachable comfortably from LA, even by
car.
Before I went, I gave John and his agency a special assignment. They should
look into the backgrounds and present situation of the other three
survivors. They were allowed to give any help necessary. Most of all, they
should try to help them getting rid of their drug addictions. After that
they should come back to me if help was needed to start a new life. Even if
they refused any help, I wanted information about them during the time to
come. At the time I did not tell Toni anything about it. I knew she would
have done it herself if she had been able to.
Time returned to normal again. I found Terry a job in a law firm, which
dealt with many of my interests. Within that firm she also would be the
official contact with John's agency. She started to search for an own
apartment. After a long weekend with Toni I got my surprise, when she
greeted me on entering, with a big smile on her face. I thought I heard a
familiar voice from the kitchen. When the voice appeared, I got
confirmation and greeted Paula. On my questions, Terry told me that she had
fallen in love with her. She was older than the last girls she had. But
Paula with freckles and all, looked much younger than she actually
was. "And you know" she continued with a conspiratorial voice, "that she
has the most wonderful hairless girl pussy I ever seen". Shortly after that
both of them moved into a nice apartment on the sea shore.
During this period John visited me in Los Angeles; he was on business there
for another customer. He used the opportunity to report about the
developments with the other three survivors of the mansion. He could have
done that by phone, but he also had something else for me. He handed me a
video tape. Toni, Runa and a third, male person were pictured in the middle
of their "act". When john put it into the machine, I basically saw the act
of which I had been part.
There were many close ups of both their dicks, which seemed to be
constantly erected. Again I could not help it and admired Runa's. Also the
faces were several times in close-up. I could see that Runa's, behind her
make-up, was very beautiful. She had an almost doll like face. She had big
eyes that showed the same kind of sadness that I knew so well. Looking at
her in this video, I could understand at last that Toni had wanted to
protect her. The video told more or less the story of a day in the life of
two she-male whores. It started with their getting up in the morning and
showed shots of a shower together. The short scenes of the morning showed
some washing and make up session. The early afternoon showed them on the
Streets of New Orleans. The early evening they had a customer, who wanted
Runa to be whipped before he would become the same. If I would have
expected a soft porno whipping I was mistaken. I saw Toni whip Runa so
merciless that the girl passed out.
After that beating it was impossible that the next scenes had been shot at
the same day. The next one was from a private party. Ten men were fucked
them in an orgy of dicks and sperm. Runa took two in her mouth and two in
her ass. Toni was apparently only able to take one and one. Especially when
a new dick entered them, both girls showed short signs of pain. Both
however jerked of two further dicks during the fucking. The men came one
after another. I never saw so many sperm being swallowed as on that
tape. When it was over John and I were surprised to see that there was
almost no sperm spilled. The end of the movie was Runa sleeping in Toni's
lap, while she was sucking on Toni's dick like on a thumb.
John told me that probably the bulk of the tapes had been burned with the
club. Inquiries with contacts at the police resulted in the info that they
had found a tape stock. The tapes however, were utterly useless, as they
were melted by the heat. This one surfaced and that probably meant that
others would have escaped the fire too. He was of the opinion that these
tapes did not pose s tread to Toni. Luckily for us digital cameras, DVD's
and most of all: the internet with P2P platforms did not exist yet. This
tape had been on the market at a price between 250 and 300 dollars,
indicating that is was a rarity. Still this whole affair would be hanging
over Toni's head. We both decided however, that it was not the time yet to
inform her about it.
After Toni's body had healed from the multiple injuries she changed into
the detox. The first time was incredible rough on her. There were moments
that I thought about getting her out of there. I had enough money to
support her drug habit, or get her on methadone. A discussion with the
doctors about this possibility had me discard the possibility. They advised
me that as long as Toni wanted to continue with the detox, we should do
so. For Toni there was no alternative, she only wanted to be clean again.
During this time I spent as much time with her as possible. Together with
her I experienced all the ugly phases of the process of detoxication. After
the first week she became aggressive. They had to move her to a padded
room, as she started to bang her head against the walls. She refused to
eat. Her weight, which had already decreased during the time in the
mansion, went further down. After four days, they started to feed her
intravenously. Although I warned Terry about visiting her, she wanted to
come along during that time. Afterwards she had a nervous break down. Later
she told me that she had been sure that Toni would not survive the
treatment. After the first month however, improvements became slowly
visible.
The second episode of Vesna was released during this time. Although Toni
very much wanted to participate, the doctors strongly advised against
it. So she could only see Terry and me on television. The movie was
received very positively and took the charts by storm. It really was
starting to be a science fiction epos, with scenes of space battles and
long voyages to far away milky ways. Music played a big role in the first
part of the movie. The Science fiction scenes of the second part were
overwhelming though.
The band SOLARDRIVE had made a name for themselves between the two
movies. Heavy touring and excellent musicianship got them to the top of the
charts. After the songs of the first movie, they proved their talents by
continuing to score hits with their own songs. I had planned it that way
and was overjoyed that it worked. They definitively did not share the fate
of the late Monkees. By the way, they were managed by one of the companies
of the slowly growing Doesburg Empire.
After the worst times had passed and she was discharged from the detox,
Toni had to change hospitals. I wanted her to come to Los Angeles and she
was glad about that change of air. It had become clear, that especially her
leg injury was much worse than originally diagnosed. The first surgeries in
New Orleans were in no way definite. She had to have two additional surgery
sessions to get it Ok again.
Another problem was her genital area. Her penis and the remaining seed ball
had been saved during the emergency surgery in New Orleans. Her penis was
not as straight anymore as it used to be though. She told me that she did
not feel as she used to. She felt herself incomplete. She also said that
the scars itched when the weather changed. I tried to laugh everything
away, telling her that her cum was as plenty as before. Together with her
doctors we saw the idea growing within her, until she herself started to
talk about transgender corrective surgery.
Then it was time for her to come home. After her long recovery it was also
time to start talking about the future. Homecoming was strange, as she had
never lived in Los Angeles. I did not want her to live in the Laurel Canyon
house, where I had lived during my wild period. And that is why I bought a
house in Malibu directly on the Pacific Ocean beach.
Home coming was also a private affair, as nobody was there but we two. We
had a barbeque on the patio fronting the ocean and a midnight swim. I loved
her to be back again. I realized that I had missed her much more than I
wanted to admit to myself. I had a steady partner again and noticed that
she made me a better balanced person. Especially during the first period
after her return she woke me up in panic frequently during the night. When
that happened, she always asked me to hold her. Only when I took her in my
arms and told her that everything was alright she slept again. Although she
had been very brave during all the ordeals, the experiences must have been
much more traumatic than she ever admitted.
The first days were an expedition into her new environment. She was exited
as a little girl by everything. She visited a film studio for he first
time. She met movie stars and although she had known stars of the musical
scene in Amsterdam, she said that this was more exiting. We went to the
Chinese Theatre and I showed the hand- and footprints of the stars. We
walked together along the Walk Of Fame. She asked me teasingly where my
star was. I told her that I had waited for her come back, which earned me a
kiss. We drove aimlessly through the city for several days in a row, to
give her an idea of the vastness of it. In that period we also got to the
Oscar night together. Vesna II was amongst the winners, which gave reason
for a tremendous party.
Of course I had known that the possibility to be amongst the winners was
almost 100 %. The party afterwards was organized for that reason. But for
me it was my welcome party for Toni. She met the whole cast and many of the
people that worked behind the scenes. They knew already about her, because
Paula had informed them about the mysterious lady that was the boss's
partner. Sharon treated her as if they had known each other already since
childhood. I got the confirmation that I had subconsciously found my
leading lady, by choosing the one who had many of the qualities that Toni
had. Seeing them together clearly also showed however that they had no
visible similarities.
It was Toni's night alright. It is always fascinated how Hollywood welcomes
new faces. Everybody was there and I saw many admiring glances. Some of the
known Don Juans started frontal flirting attacks and that's where the old
Toni became visible again. As in her heydays in Amsterdam, she went all the
way: flirting, and seducing. That night she was what she could be best: a
breathtaking woman. The next morning I bought her all the papers. All of
them featured stories about the mysterious partner of Matt Doesburg. They
were unanimous in their observation that she had been the real star during
the Oscar festivities.
Some time later on a warm Friday evening after having we dined at my
favorite Italian. During dinner we talked with the Luigi about Italy and
its kitchen. It was the first time I got into a conversation with him and
he was impressed with our knowledge on Italian food as well Italian history
and with our love of the country in general. When we left he gave us a
special bottle of wine. He told us that the wine had been opened already
and we should drink it at home.
That evening I took her to the beach. Sitting in the sand I poured her a
glass of the wine and we drunk our first glass silently. Luigi had not
lied; it was a special wine. Subsequently I confronted her with the
question what she wanted from life from there on. She looked at me and said
that she could not say anything about her future, before she had told me
the complete story of what had happened in New Orleans. I had only heard a
little part of it.
Here is what she told me:
To be continued.
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