Feel How You Want to Feel

Have you ever struggled with feelings? Feeling something you don’t want to? Then feeling stuck with the feeling? Who hasn’t!

If you prefer to listen:

Statistics for anxiety disorders and depression continue to climb, leading you to believe you should have control of your emotions and if you don’t there’s something wrong with you.

1 in 6 Americans take antidepressants

there are over 30 different kinds of antidepressants

Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the United States. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), 40 million Americans over the age of 18 are affected by anxiety — roughly 18 percent of the nation’s population

The constant state of stress can lead to clinical depression.

Anxiety disorder may cause loss of appetite and lack of interest in sex. Other symptoms include muscle tension, headaches, and insomnia.

Anxiety Is Bad for Your Heart! Anxiety can be just as important as other factors, such as high cholesterol, in determining whether you get heart disease or not. Previous studies have shown that mental stress and depression have harmful effects on the heart and blood vessels

Where does this put America’s state of mind? Anxiety disorders and depression increase by 20% every year.

Add to that the conditioned need for instant results, instant resolve to feeling bad and it leads to confusion, dead and dying energy – no passion, no desire, no dreams, no goals.

Maybe you want more growth in your business and you’re not seeing it – and it’s stressing you out, making your decisions more confusing, feeling more desperate.

Maybe your family never listens to you – and it makes you feel invisible and you’re not sure what to do to change it, you feel lost and isolated.

Maybe you have a mission you feel passionate about, but you have no energy or confidence to get it out in the world – and it’s weighing on your heart, bringing you down.

Whatever the root cause is of your feelings – you’re not stuck with them, not stuck where you are.

And medicating the symptoms is NOT the answer but many women think they have to in order to feel well again – or just to make the feelings go away.

ABSOLUTELY NOT.

That’s exactly what I’m here to help you with, how to own your feelings so you’re never stuck with one you don’t want or like again – without medication or isolation.

You are taught that feeling bad is a bad thing. But being emotionally healthy does not mean you must be happy all the time.

There’s a lot of information out there about emotions, feelings. Giving the impression that if you cannot control your emotions, there’s something wrong with you.

EMOTIONS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE CONTROLLED, THEY ARE MEANT TO BE FELT.

You can feel what you feel and still be emotionally healthy. It’s time to let your feelings be your guide to a happier, healthier life. I help my clients understand how to use their emotions holistically – all of them.

Of course I’m going to say there’s a better way. And it’s going to sound too simple. Because – statistics, news, media, hype, misinformation – but taking charge of how you feel really is simple.

You can start each day by choosing your feeling set point. Yes, you can actually choose how you want to feel, how you feel IS entirely up to you.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that emotions are supposed to be controlled, and if you can’t control your emotions – there’s a problem. YOU are the problem. But that’s entirely wrong. I will say it again because it’s that important.

Emotions are not meant to be controlled, they are meant to be felt.

That’s why every emotion you have, has a physical component.

Emotions are signals – not something to avoid, deny or ignore. Simply medicating someone so they don’t feel or notice their emotional signals solves NOTHING. So if someone takes meds but goes into the same life with the same beliefs, in the same conditions – problems get worse.

Where’s the power in that approach? It allows someone to believe they have no power, no control, no hope. That does not sit well with me.

Your feeling setpoint will change day-to-day – and it should. Life changes, you can change and adapt – like a ninja to stay ahead of the curve whether that be calm, organized, centered.

This is about choosing a state of BEING or feeling to move through your day on full awareness mode vs. fingers crossed, hope it goes well mode.

If you feel yourself tensing up, getting distracted, wearing down – simply revisit your feeling set point and decide what you need to do in the moment to move toward it. It’s like hitting your feeling reset button whenever you need it – just like rebooting your computer when it gets too bogged down.

That means telling yourself what you need to hear. Do not underestimate the power of this.

You ARE in charge of your energy and you can take charge of your chatter – which will get you to the feeling set point you want and need to handle your life.

The worst thing you can do is focus on how you don’t want to feel, journal about it, talk about it, tell others about it – it all adds up to magnifying how you don’t want to feel.

Make no mistake – This does not mean stuff feelings, ignore them or pretend your fine. Actually acknowledge and bring presence to how you are feeling – but if it’s not how you want to feel, do with the intention that you are not staying in that bad feeling space.

Awareness of how you are feeling, tuning in throughout your day to check your feeling set point is what helps you navigate as the day unfolds vs. unraveling with the day’s unexpected events. As long as you are aware, you can notice what you notice and adjust to a better feeling thought and emotional place.

Introduce then reinforce the belief that you can choose how you feel – you can steer your emotions in the direction you want them to go.

Here are tips to take charge and feel the way you want to feel!

1 – start each day by choosing your feeling set point, then setting the intention to let it be your home base

2 – activate that emotion with a visualization, meditation practice – walk through your entire day in your mind, how you want it to go, how you will feel, handle things – be vivid

3 – journal your goals as if they’ve already happened, only write about what you do want

4 – notice wha you notice as you move through your day

5 – hit your feeling reset as often as needed – adjust to get back to your feeling set point for the day