I would go out tonightBut I haven't got a stitch to wearThis man said "it's gruesomeThat someone so handsome should care"

Ah! A jumped-up pantry boyWho never knew his placeHe said "return the ring"He knows so much about these thingsHe knows so much about these things

I would go out tonightBut I haven't got a stitch to wearThis man said "it's gruesomeThat someone so handsome should care"La, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man...Oh, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man...

Ah! A jumped-up pantry boyWho never knew his placeHe said "return the ring"He knows so much about these thingsHe knows so much about these thingsHe knows so much about these things

New York version adds:

I would go out tonightBut I haven't got a stitch to wear

I would go out tonightBut I haven't got a stitch to wearOh, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man...Oh, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man...

Ah! A jumped-up pantry boyWho never knew his placeHe said "return the ring"He knows so much about these thingsHe knows so much about these thingsHe knows so much about these things