Saturday, October 22, 2016

Facebook Bans Mennonite Ladies from Posting Pictures of Flowers

After controversially banning mothers from posting breast feeding pictures, reports indicate that social media giant Facebook is now planning a ban on pictures of flowers. The news has been met with strong opposition from the Mennonite gardening community.

“No one should feel uncomfortable looking at pictures of my beautiful flowers,” said Martina Steingart of Clearbrook, BC, who usually posts twenty or thirty snapshots of her prized calla lilies each day. “The close-knit relationship between a Mennonite woman and her flower bed is completely natural. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Still, some have raised security concerns, as increasing numbers of Mennonites not only post photos of flowers but also use them as profile pictures.

“We feel we should be able to properly identify people using the site,” said Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg. “If Tante Annie has a closeup of her gladiolas up there it creates a lot of issues when trying to play the Mennonite game.”

Sources say that flower-posting increases dramatically during the summer months, but by winter the photos are normally replaced with images of baking and canning. With the problem only seeming to rise, Instagram is also considering a similar ban, which is also rumoured to include a ban on Mennonite men posting pictures of fish and trucks.