Eight is great

Published 7:00 pm, Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Until last week, the room belonged to 16-month-old Dursun Asik. He was the baby of the family, an active toddler who likes to say "hi" and fiddle with the bathroom toilet.

Now he's a big brother. Three times over.

His mother, Cynthia, gave birth to triplets on March 22 at St. Vincent's Medical Center in Bridgeport. Selim was born at 8:56 a.m., Ibrahim at 8:59 and Leyla arrived fashionably late at 9:02.

Four little kids would be a lot for any mom to handle.

But Cynthia Asik has more than four. There are two more boys - Andres, 8, and Ryan 18 - and two more girls - Lauren, 12, and Victoria, 15 - from Cynthia's previous relationships.

That makes eight.

"We have an instant big family," said Cynthia, 38, a phone company customer representative. "It's a lot, a whole life change. I don't have a grip on some of it. It's pretty overwhelming."

The babies are still at the hospital, but there is still plenty to worry about at home. Finances. Insurance. And, of course, sleeping arrangements.

Cynthia and her husband, Ali, will use one bedroom upstairs. Dursun will occupy a second bedroom. The triplets will share a third. Andres, a third-grader at Huckleberry Hill School, and Lauren, a sixth-grader at Whisconier Middle School, will move into bedrooms in the lower half of the house, in a space that was once an apartment.

Victoria, her mother's constant helper throughout the pregnancy, just moved out. She is transferring from Henry Abbott Technical High School in Danbury to Bullard-Havens Tech in Bridgeport, where she will study hairdressing. She'll live with her father - Cynthia's former husband.

Ryan is in college in Florida. When he and Victoria come to visit they will stay downstairs. Somewhere.

There are other challenges. Any family trip will require two cars. The family's Nissan Pathfinder SUV has only three child car seats. And 10 people in the other car, a Nissan Altima sedan?

Forget about it.

Ali and Cynthia both came from big families.

Cynthia, whose parents are Puerto Rican, was raised in Bridgeport with six sisters.

Ali Asik grew up with four brothers and sisters. After the family emigrated from Turkey about 17 years ago, Ali's father opened a diner in Bridgeport. His sons grew up working there.

Ali and Cynthia were married 2� years ago. Not long after, Ali and his brothers opened Harold's Diner on Newtown Road in Danbury. Ali and Cynthia moved to Brookfield. And Dursun was born. With Cynthia being 37, the couple moved forward quickly with their plans to have another child together.

Ali's and Cynthia's families both had a history of twins and they joked about the possibility. Still, they were shocked to learn that Cynthia - who took no fertility drugs - was carrying triplets.

Though multiple births have become more frequent in the past 25 years, triplets are still fairly rare. Nationally, about 4 million babies are born each year. Only about 7,000 of them come out three at a time.

It had been about 17 years since St. Vincent's last had triplets. This set did not come easily.

The Asiks were born several weeks early, by Cesarean section. Two were breach, and came out upright. One stood on Cynthia's rib cage making it hard for her to breathe during the birth.

They ranged in size from 4 pounds to a shade under 5. Born with fluid in their lungs, doctors used a device to pump air into them early on. The triplets also had to be fed through tubes for a time. Now they can eat and breathe on their own.

Leyla and Selim are in incubators. Ibrahim, the biggest of the three, has graduated to a crib.

"They are so tiny," said Cynthia. The nurses have to fold diapers to make them fit.

Every day, Cynthia takes care of her other children in Brookfield and goes to the St. Vincent's to feed the babies - and to talk to them.

"Hey guys to come home, you got to eat," she tells them. "It is so amazing to see them fighting so hard to get stronger."

The other day, she and her husband watched the trio in the hospital nursery. Leyla, lifted her head full of black hair and stretched. Her big brother, Ibrahim, did the same exact movement.

"When you look and see three, you are so amazed. It is a gift from God," said Cynthia.

The nurses call the triplets "their special babies."

"The family was a pleasure to deal with. The babies are really adorable, said Dr. Benjamin Tsang, the neonatologist in charge of St. Vincent's special care nursery.

Each already has his or her own personality, Tsang said.

"Selim is the feistiest. He is the one who moves a lot, cries the loudest and wants to be fed when he wants to be fed."

Cynthia's pregnancy was a family affair.

"If it wasn't for the kids, I wouldn't have made it through the last months. They were 100 percent," said Cynthia.

Ryan called from college to check up on his mom to make sure she was all right.

Victoria, the 15-year-old, helped her mother clean the nursery, polish the furniture, vacuum, disinfect the new baby swings, and rearrange the nursery closet. She also watched out for her brothers.

Lauren, the 12-year-old, played with Dursun and helped pack her mother's bags for the hospital. Already, the triplets have made her a popular person at Whisconier. She likes it when classmates ask how her two new brothers and new sister are doing.

Already, Lauren is thinking ahead. She hopes to be the kind of sister who can help the triplets learn new things every day, like how to ride a bike and how to read.

"It's a miracle," Lauren said of the babies. "I think it is going to be exciting to be a big sister. I hope they are healthy all and come home at the same time."

Andres, the 8-year-old, also wants to be a mentor. His goal is to teach the triplets one of his favorite sports - baseball. "I think it's nice we get more babies to play with. It's fun," said Andres.

Cynthia hopes being part of a big family will teach her children responsibility, teamwork and family values. "That is the best thing you can give kids," she said.

"They are really excited," Cynthia said of her older children. "They don't know what awaits them. Being part of a big family, you have to be a team, to work together or everything falls apart. I have to tell them new recruits are coming in."

Along with joy, the future holds uncertainty.

Ali Asik and his brothers worked hard to renovate the building that housed Harold's Diner and to make the restaurant a success. But there was too much competition and the diner closed last year.

That was an emotional time, said Cynthia. They had many devoted customers and employees who became their friends.

"We got to meet some really nice people," said Cynthia, who is confident Ali and his brothers will try again to open a restaurant.

For now, Ali works the late shift at a New Britain diner. Cynthia is on maternity leave from her SBC job in New Haven, where she is a Spanish-speaking customer service representative.

She is unsure when she will be able to return to work. If she has to take more than six weeks off, it will be unpaid. The couple is also unsure how to cover all their children's insurance needs. Out of pocket, it could cost $1,000 a month.

Cynthia is also losing some of her helpers. Not only has her teenage daughter moved out, but her mother, Eladia, who came from Tennessee to lend a hand, will soon return home.

Still, Cynthia is optimistic. She said she has several churches and relatives have been praying for her. She is content to put her faith in God.

"Nothing can shake it. That is why so far everything has went so well," she said. "We have the foundation already. If we can make it through the worst times, the good times will be back eventually."