The chronicle of a life split between urban Manhattan and rural Montana.

Saturday, December 5, 2015

OUR HOUSE

Double indemnity
Early on in our relationship Frank once
jokingly stated "What's mine is mine.
And what's yours is mine." However
in reality, nothing could be closer to the
truth. That's because from the start we
have always shared more than our love.
And honestly, that complete partnership
has made our commitment to each other
stronger everyday for over twenty years.
Mostly due to the fact we've each made
sacrifices for the other. And together as
a team we're stronger, smarter, braver.
Proof that two are better than one.

Strength in numbers
When I first met Frank I was a rather
broken individual. Via circumstances
beyond my control I'd literally lost it.
That is my traditional nuclear family,
home, assets, along with my career.
Whether it all was due to karma or
caprice - something went very wrong.
And honesty, I wasn't sure that I'd
be able to ever rise above said ashes.
The saying that love conquers all has
been proven by what Frank's support
has enabled me to accomplish during
our twenty plus years of partnership.

Two by two
While it may not seem like it now,
Frank took a huge gamble on me.
He sacrificed a calm and serene
existence for the drama of a man
in flux. And slowly, with his help
I overcame each and every obstacle.
So while in the end, my career has
fueled our quality of life, I couldn't
have done it without him. And for
that alone Frank has my undying
love, gratitude, and commitment.
Yet even a saint can occasionally
get rather touchy. Hence this blog.

Two for the road
That's because in case you haven't
already figured it out, it's seemingly
all about me. To most it seems that
I'm the lead actor, the star in front
of the footlights, while Frank makes
sure the show goes on. Yet nothing
could be farther from the truth. In
reality we are one hundred percent
a team. And while my somewhat
forceful demeanor might make it
seem otherwise - it's all about US!
Our shared hopes, dreams, goals,
and vision fuel where we're going!

Joint property
Yet sadly at times I don't give Frank his
due. As that oldie by Crosby, Stills, &
Nash states, "Our house is a very, very,
very fine house." Three years ago this
month we purchased our historic home,
now better known as the Passion Pit.
In truth, Frank had the vision to see the
house for what it could be. Therefore
throughout the subsequent years every
decision related to our new abode was
made JOINTLY. Thus this house isn't
simply joint property it's OUR home.
So... why can't I simply say just that?

Twice the insult
We all utter things unknowingly. Whether
said natural transmissions are indication
of some deep, dark Freudian undercurrent
is questionable at best. Yet whenever
I mention this building I apparently refer
to it as "MY HOUSE." Unbeknownst to
me, I vociferously claim sole ownership
of everything related to and contained
within OUR home. Given Frank and I
share everything completely and legally,
nothing could be further from the truth.
Hence unintentionally I belittle the one
who in reality - made this ALL possible.

My one and only
I really can't defend such selfish claims
of ownership. Except to say that I've no
idea why I don't passionately reinforce
our joint partnership and all that it truly
involves. Hopefully Frank has lacked
for little beyond the credit he so deeply
deserves. Thus along with my gratitude
he has my commitment to do my best
to alter my insular attributions. That's
where you come in. The next time that
I utter "I" or "mine" - please help me
correct it to "we" and "ours." After all,
that's the truth. What's mine is OURS.