Thursday, 30 July 2015

Things They Don't Tell You About... Break Ups

It's a scary prospect, being single.... I haven't been single for longer than two weeks up until two months ago, so I know exactly how hard it can be. In today's edition of TTDTYA, I'm going to make you feel a bit better about where you're at. Okay? 'Kay, here we go!

1. It's Not Always Going To Hurt

Breakups are shit. Lets all be honest here. They hurt for both parties and they cause ripples that reach far and wide. However, while right now you might be feeling a bit like you got hit in the soul by a freight train, I promise you, time really does heal all wounds. You're going to come through the other end.

2. Junk Food and Movies Help Immensely.

I've lost count of the number of weekends I have spent with my friends drinking cocktails or wine, eating icecream and watching bad Sci-Fi movies or re-runs of old sitcoms. Time spent focusing on the things you love with the people you love, ignoring the calorie content of everything and indulging in anything you want will take the edge off. Just don't develop unhealthy habits, ya hear?!

3. Clearing Them From Your Everyday Life is Necessary.

My Ex was one of the greatest people I've ever had the pleasure of journeying through even just a snippet of my life with. I had pictures of us from multiple things, framed and tacked up onto walls and as backrounds on devices. Changing the wallpapers, taking down the pictures, boxing up the stolen hoodies, it all sucked, but it's needed. You can't start fresh with old stuff clogging up your life and soul. I don't want you to forget that person or what they taught you, but you should try to clean the slate. It's over, don't linger on the past.

4. It's Okay to Miss Them.

I've never broken up with someone and never thought of them again - nobody does that! It's natural and okay to miss them. You will notice that in time you miss them less, you don't wonder how they are or did they ever get that eye test. But if they do cross your mind, it is okay to miss them a bit. They were a big part of your life, you can't erase that.

5. You're Allowed to Fall To Bits, Rebel, Whatever You Want!!

You've been with "Mr Right" for 7 years, and now that it's over you feel the need to indulge yourself in ways you felt you couldn't before. Go and do what you feel motivated to do. For me it was getting a piercing, taking on more hours in work, sometimes crying while listening to records in the dark, but at the end of the day it all went into the healing process. If you want to get a wild hair cut, tattoo, go on an adventure to Peru for a week, cry into your childhood bear or go out partying every weekend, that's your prerogative.

6. Finding A Hobby To Occupy

Your Mind Helps

Taken from Reddit /r/vinyl, Credit to owner

I've been getting into Vinyl a lot lately, and when I'm feeling a bit crap I go onto the internet and look up albums I want, or I go onto Reddit and read things that make me laugh. I took up learning French recently, so that's really occupying my head as learning a language is a pretty decent commitment. I've gotten back into reading too! More time to do things, means more time to be productive! Vinyl takes up a physical space in my life, Reddit helps time pass when I'm sad, learning French is a way to focus and reading is a way to unwind!

Breakups are hard, but they happen. You will be okay, you will learn from this and grow. It might seem bleak and scary, but that's good, you have endless chances to make yourself happy.

You're brilliant, and you're going to get through this, I promise you.