Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Headlines - Tuesday March 8

Republican Sen. John Ensign won't be trying to reclaim his U.S. Senate seat in 2012.

Ensign made the announcement today during a noon news conference at the Lloyd George Federal Courthouse in Las Vegas. He isn't resigning his seat -- simply not pursuing his re-election in 2012.

He said he came to the decision in the last week or so, adding that a Senate Ethics Committee investigation had "zero effect" on the decision not to seek re-election.

"I just came to the conclusion that I couldn't put my family through this," he said.

"I just came to the conclusion that I couldn't put my family through this."

Seriously???

Now he gets all family-minded and wants to spare them any drama or humiliation.

He's a bit beyond "fashionably late" to that party, wouldn't you say?

The time to think about sparing his family the humiliation of his affair was before he started boinking an aide, before he got her 19-year-old son a high-paying "job" at the RNC as a "policy analyst," before his parents shelled out a hundred grand for hush-money (without batting an eye, making me think they have done it before), before he broke the law and got the cuckolded husband jobs from his buddies that he was legally barred from doing.

His mistake was in committing Louisiana-type sleaze and corruption in Nevada, where they are more honest about their whorin' and sinful ways. Remember, David Vitter just sailed to reelection, and being a known whoremonger with a diaper fetish didn't hurt him a bit. When they next meet on the Senate floor, will Vitter be able to hide his smirk?

Somehow, I kinda doubt it.

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Speaking at the CAPAF today, House energy committee ranking member Henry Waxman (D-CA) railed against the toxic influence of Koch Industries on efforts to fight global warming. Waxman, who fought polluters to pass the Clean Air Act of 1990, is dismayed by the level of outright science denial among the Republican Party today, exemplified by their votes to slash and burn environmental protection, and the Upton-Inhofe bill to reverse the scientific finding that carbon pollution threatens public health:

It apparently no longer matters in Congress what health experts and scientists think. All that seems to matter is what Koch Industries thinks.

The bloodiest, craziest, most Gaddafiest revolution of 2011 (so far) got a little closer to the end as the West's favorite dictator/basket case supposedly begged for a deal to let him and his family escape Libya alive. The rebel leadership thought about this for several seconds and then said, "Nah, dude." Let this be a lesson to dictators and despots around the world: Don't send military jet planes to bomb your own people just before asking them for a "deal." According to the Wall Street Journal, "The rebel-led governing council, based in Benghazi, in eastern Libya, rejected the invitation and said it wasn't sincere." Meanwhile, the Obama Administration is maybe thinking about sending NATO some memo or whatever, perhaps a text message. If Obama loves Ronald Reagan so much, you would think Obama might remember how the Reagan Administration bombed the hell out of Libya in 1986, just to show everybody. [Wall Street Journal]

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Remember how your fake-liberal boyfriend Barack Obama was going to close down the international torture-prisons the United States operates all over the world, starting with the evil-ass Gitmo? Ha ha, just kidding! The Obama Administration will start military tribunal kangaroo court torture executions at Guantanamo again, because why not? (It's "Political Reality," ha ha.) [BBC News]

Michelle Obama will not be pleased until every fat person in America rises up against her, which is why her anti-obesity campaign, also known as "Let's Move!" has now mobilized on Twitter. Although Twitter was once a joke website where friendless losers could share real-time updates about their sad lives, it is now mostly an online sign-up sheet for people who want to overthrow a government somewhere. Now that our FLOTUS' healthy eating campaign is on Twitter, it's only a matter of time before President Obama gets kicked out off the White House and is replaced with a salad bar. Most Americans probably won't mind, though, because of all politicians, Michelle Obama's body temperature most closely resembles that of a human. What?

The Republican Party today announced a comprehensive plan to address global warming. As the Party never believed global warming exists, it came as a surprise even to themselves.

"Unlike Democrat tax and regulate plans, this is simple, comprehensive, and handles the problem immediately, once and for all", said House Speaker, John Boehner, a-glowing. "Instead of stopping global warming it reverses it. And, we know this is a good bill because it is only one-page long."

The bill, authored by freshman Tea Party Member Ben Quayle—whose Vice-President father, Dan, was said to have promoted a manned-mission to the sun, proposing to avoid the extreme heat by going at night–is called the "Reverse [Non-Existent] Global Warming With a Stroke of the Pen" Act. It outlaws Fahrenheit, substituting Celsius for all temperature readings, reports and thermometers, and thereby instantaneously reduces all temperatures.

Great site, more seriousness than snark, but great site. Check it guys, I think you'll like it.

"There are concerns about what is happening, but a strong argument is being made that they're trying to preserve [Bradley Manning's] safety, they don't want him harming himself, and using his own clothing to hang himself, or do something like that," he said. "That's happened in prison before. I think it is possible to protect him, I think, and there are some legitimate reasons to believe that that may be true also. But I think that a lot of people are now reviewing this very, very closely, people have weighed in, myself included, I think that analyses are being made. There was a big article in the newspapers today examining it. And I'm convinced that there will be real scrutiny with respect to that issue."

Tony Perkins: Christian Leaders Are Forming An "Army Of Spartans"

Perkins explains the absolute necessity of getting Christians into all levels of government while Boykin compared Christians today to the Spartan army and quoted King Leonidas by declaring "molon labe" ["come and get them"] when he and his army were told to lay down their weapons. Likewise, Boykin declared "molon labe," stating that he will not be silenced and challenged those in Washington who are out to take his liberties, rob his grandchildren, and destroy America to just try to take them from him. Finally, Joyner announced that Christians have more than enough people to take control, but they need to bind together and, as such, would soon be unveiling coalition called "300".

The Christianists/teabaggers are quite open about their plans to somehow overturn the government and replace it with a dominionist theocracy. Here they are discussing it.

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Fracking earthquakes

As if more reasons were required to be skeptical of the gas-drilling technique known as "fracking," now the practice has been linked to causing earthquakes in addition to other forms of mayhem such as flammable drinking water.

Oklahoma City-based Chesapeake Energy and Clarita Operating of Little Rock told the Arkansas Oil and Gas Commission on Friday that they've stopped operation of the wells near Greenbrier and Guy pending the panel's next regular meeting on March 29.

The commission says there is likely a link between the wells and the earthquakes. There have been more than 800 quakes in the area in the past six months and a magnitude 4.7 quake – the strongest in Arkansas in 35 years – hit there Sunday.

"The U.S. government is not broke," said Marc Chandler, global head of currency strategy for Brown Brothers Harriman & Co. in New York. "There's no evidence that the market is treating the U.S. government like it's broke."

The U.S. today is able to borrow at historically low interest rates, paying 0.68 percent on a two-year note that it had to offer at 5.1 percent before the financial crisis began in 2007. Financial products that pay off if Uncle Sam defaults aren't attracting unusual investor demand. And tax revenue as a percentage of the economy is at a 60-year low, meaning if the government needs to raise cash and can summon the political will, it could do so.

It's odd hearing how "America is broke" from Exceptionalist wingnuts who think the United States is God's country of apple pie, foreigner smackdowns and magical wonderment.

If your baseless rants, naked racism, and nonsensical theories turn real people away from calling into your radio show, dont worry, Clear Channel has you covered.

The company responsible for syndicating big conservative radio names like Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity has been using paid actors to call in to their radio shows.

According to a recent report in Tablet Magazine, Premiere Radio Networks, a subsidiary of Clear Channel Communications, hired actors to call in as guests.

A website for the Premiere On Call service was taken offline before the report was published, but a cached version of the website is still available. [...]

"Premiere On Call is our new custom caller service," the website said. "We supply voice talent to take/make your on-air calls, improvise your scenes or deliver your scripts. Using our simple online booking tool, specify the kind of voice you need, and we'll get your the right person fast. Unless you request it, you won't hear that same voice again for at least two months, ensuring the authenticity of your programming for avid listeners."

Brewer decided that the best way to close the state's budget gaps is to simultaneously cut Medicaid, cut education, and dish out tax cuts for corporations. Sound familiar? It should, because Republican governors, legislatures, representatives, and senators nationwide are seeking to do the exact same thing. Arizona is currently facing the deepest cuts to Medicaid, with Governor Jan Brewer proposing to throw as many as one in five people off the state's Medicaid program.