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Republican Rick Hill’s Mermaid Mistress: A Sordid Tail

This evening we received the an interesting message via email, posted below. It appears to be, if nothing else, a sweet compilation of 2012 Montana Gubernatorial candidate Rick Hill’s more lurid accomplishments. Perhaps the virtuous young lady was only a cocktail waitress and not officially one of the mermaids, we aren’t certain. The lounge’s unique window allows bar patrons to get drunk while lusting over the mermaids swimming seductively….. The image of the now-elderly adulterer Hill caressing his young mermaid mistress while his wife and small children beg him to return home to his family presents an incredible visual and when Piano Pat Spoonheim is playing show tunes on the lounge’s organ, I’d imagine the temptation is just too great.

While not quite a murder, adultery would hopefully be considered an immoral act by Hill’s own party. You know, the Republican party that thinks being gay should remain a felony, in spite of being ruled unconstitutional and that using cannabis medically is unethical because the nanny federal government says so. Unfaithful spouses are generally dishonest and self-centered, but sex with a young, wet mermaid is no doubt tempting.

Will Montana’s morality police accept such a flawed Republican candidate? It seems many already decided not only to accept Hill, but to support him financially as well. Medical use of marijuana is far too immoral for the 2011 state legislature, but banging a mermaid at the Sip N Dip is not an issue. Senator Taylor Brown, his wife and others in his family maxed out their contributions to Hill. Senator Bruce Tutvedt also supports Rick Hill, proving he picks his nose better than his candidates. Other notable members of Montana’s legislature supporting Rick Hill include Mormon Liz Bangerter, Walt McNutt, Jim Shockley, Jon Sonju, Don Steinbeisser, and others. Want to see all of the lobbyists and hypocritical family values promoting Hill supporters? Check it out here, but a bath may be required afterwards.

So who is behind the anti-Rick Hill email? The Scribd page hosting each of the articles posted is:

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We are writing to apprise you of something very unfortunate that is happening in Helena. A republican congressman from the 1990s, Rick Hill, who left office under the cloud of an extramarital affair, is trying to buy himself the GOP nomination for governor.

Rick Hill cannot win the governor’s race. Why? Because he has had too many women in his life. While he was married with little children, he carried on regular sex with a cocktail waitress at the Sip and Dip Lounge in Great Falls. (Sip and Dip is a bar similar to “Hooters,” because waitresses wear bikinis and mermaid outfits to seduce the customers.). And he even carried on his relationship on one occasion in front of the children, according to the Billings Gazette and other major newspapers (the articles are attached to this e-mail).

These revelations–compounded by the fact that Hill enjoyed touting his “family values”– caused Mr. Hill to make a hasty departure from Congress.

Also, Hill’s first wife, who he emotionally abused and who he divorced in an ugly 8-year long custody battle, told the press that on one occasion, when he hadn’t been home in weeks to see the kids, she brought her kids to the bar where he was enjoying the company of his mistress. They begged him to come home, but he said no to his family. This is not a conservative. And this is a dead duck, politically.

We believe a Republican Primary is for nominating a candidate who EMBODIES CONSERVATIVE SOCIAL VALUES, like family and faith. We cannot allow a person with “Bill Clinton values” to be a nominee for the Republican Party for Governor.

Please also remember that the Democrats–and their liberal big-mouth Governor and their environmentalist Attorney General (who will be the Democrat nominee for Governor)–are all praying that Rick Hill is the Republican nominee. With his womanizing past, they know he is easy prey.

Let’s not give them what they want. Do Not Compromise on the principles that unite us: conservative values, family values, and candidates who actuallly practice them. And shame on the liberal republican establishment in Helena who are giving Rick Hill money and secretly trying to seal-up the nomination for him.

We have attached links to several newspaper articles for your review. Please read them and be informed.

Where does the author expect to find a candidate (R or D) who is not a low life adulterous, sell-out slime. Representative Democracy is a dinosaur who’s day is past. The net could place the power into the hands of the people where it was intended to be. Healthy organisms do not carry parasites.

Just an FYI on facts on this story. We did not have mermaids at the hotel until 1997. Rick Hill had his affair a long time before that. Just wanted to clarify that. Oh, and we don’t let our employees wear bikinis at work. Even the mermaids have costumes that cover 85% of their bodies.

Thanks for the clarification, Sandra. I am well aware of the mermaid’s attire- I also know that your establishment is far from a Hooters-style restaurant- those tidbits came not from me but from the initial email sent by “montana conservative families”. Did we capitalize on the mermaid lunacy? Certainly. It was too hard to resist. Thank you Sandra!