It's been a long time since I've watched Hercules, & it's weird how much it doesn't hold up, which itself is weird because there's still a lot of good in there. The Muses are a delight. DeVito & Woods are bringing it. The art is lovely. But the script is a little too "hip"; the nicknames are very jarring, & there are way too many characters trying to imitate the Genie. Hercules himself sounds almost exactly like Aladdin, & their characters being near opposites (powerless streetwise everyman & superhuman naive demigod) makes that just silly. The washout of Greek mythology is irritating; I know kids can handle the actual stories because I had learned a lot of the actual stories already, in school. But most of all...."Go the Distance" is a really bad song.

Treated the kids to a pizza party and rootbeer floats on Saturday night, with 'Ponyo' the night's entertainment. Never before saw the whole thing in one sitting. Kids liked it lots. By far not my favourite Miyazaki flick (that'd be 'Castle of Cagliostro', natch), but it's alright.

7. Spider-Man: Far From Home - 5 out of 5
Fun as hell, great effects. Perfectly easy to follow if you're like me and haven't really kept up with Marvel at all (last MCU movie I saw was Civil War). Main cast was very likable all around.

8. Where'd You Go, Bernadette? - 5 out of 5
Cate Blanchett is incredible. Bernadette is a great character and the movie wisely focuses mostly on her. Beautifully shot. Plot moves briskly, though maybe a tad too much near the end. This kind of movie is extremely my bag and I'm not sure why it's gotten such meh reception.

50) Hocus Pocus - A-
51) Arthur Christmas - B+. This actually turned out to be pretty delightful.
52) Elf - A
53) Rocko's Modern Life: Static Cling - B+. I was scared this would be super cliché after seeing the trailer; luckily that was just another cast of "trailers suck". The episodes related to the Bigheads' kid, though, were always my least favorite, so having this plot so strongly dependent on that arc of the series was annoying. On the whole, still fun, but then it got overshadowed by.....
54) Invader Zim: Enter the Florpus - A. Where was the marketing for this one, Nickelodeon!? I only saw it because Netflix recommended it after I watched Static Cling! Utterly glorious.
55) Us - B. I get what Peele was going for, but the metaphor doesn't really work, nor do either of the last two reveals. Get Out was way better. Stellar performances across the board, though.
56) Five Feet Apart - B+. Bit sappy, however, I appreciate the realism with which they treat the disease in question.
57) Ant-Man - B
58) Ant-Man & the Wasp - B+

8. Spider-man: Far From Home
Bummed out now about the whole Spider-man debacle. They won't continue this story and that sucks. Right when they got us at a cliffhanger. I thought the opening was stupid. Other than that, good stuff.

I rewatched the entire Star Wars movie franchise
9. Star Wars (1977)
My favorite out of all of them, It's archetypal and I love it. It's got that B-movie blockbuster fare that's done right. About 40 years later it still holds up.

10. Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
Perfect sequel.

11. Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
This grew on me more throughout the years. The only thing that kind of annoys me from a plot perspective is Skywalker's plan to get Solo back. It seems that he has Plan A, B, C, etc. when he could have just gone there himself (which he does ultimately), and in that sense it feels like they were just taking up run-time for the sake of having a feature length film.

12. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace
Hokay. Prequels suck. Blah blah blah. But let's re-evaluate this from a retrospective now that the sequel trilogy is out and bringing things to a close. Say what you want about Lucas, he was still good at directing. Not writing. Those are two different things. I love many shots in this film. I love when Qui-gon and Obi-wan turn around and reveal themselves for the first time in the movie. I love the cutting of the action in the podracing scene. Visually, everything is Lucas's style. There's a reason I found this movie exciting as a kid, and the action itself is still exciting. Natalie Portman has the enthusiasm of a cardboard box though. Fan-service ruins this film (Anakin makes C-3PO? Really?). But to be honest, the overarching plot that Lucas had in mind with the prequel trilogy is really interesting - the slow rise of the Emperor as he pulls strings from the background. Look, the prequels were about a more enlightened period before the Empire took over. Things were at peace and I don't mind that it started off talking about "tax trade routes" - we still got a cool opening with Qui-gon and Obi-wan. Sure, midi-chlorians sound dumb, but this was a more "Classical" period of the galaxy's history and they would have known more about the Force. The prophecy is the real thing that is dumb because there's really nothing in the original trilogy that talked about that and it's just thrown in as a contrived plot point to make the Jedi care about Anakin.

Also, there is no reason for Anakin to tag along with the rest of the group to liberate Naboo. No reason. It would have made more sense for him to stay under some care on Coruscant. It would have been better if he stowed away on the return trip, and that would show his reckless nature and eagerness to save people. Like "People in trouble? Padme's people? I want to impress Padme! I want to save the day!"

Also, I like how the Trade Federation blockade was a very important plot point but then when the party agrees to return to Naboo to liberate it. . .they can suddenly land on Naboo no problem.

13. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
The worst of the three, IMO. The fact that Padme doesn't freak out when Anakin admits to killing Tusken Raider women and children is a big red flag. Either she's under the influence of the Dark Side through Anakin or she doesn't consider Tusken Raider "people" or something. Alderaan should have been introduced in this movie. Anakin's killing of the Tusken Raiders is a key scene but it should have been fleshed out more. They could have taken out extraneous material like Obi-wan visiting "his old pal Dex", C-3PO's utterly ridiculous adventure in the droid factory, and stupid stuff like that. There's a scene in Tartakovsky' Clone Wars cartoons where Anakin chases Asajj Ventress and kills her in a fit of rage. When she falls to her death, he shouts at the top of his lungs. Then, he calmly tosses her lightsaber into the abyss. We needed to see THAT Anakin in this movie. That would have excused the nonsense in this film. He should have chased the Tusken Raider leader or something like how he did Asajj Ventress and had a scene like that. Count Dooku is important but we don't see him until the third act. That's a huge problem. The other huge problem lies in the creation of the clone army. This Jedi we never knew mysteriously ordered clones 10 years ago. They still go along with the clones instead of investigating further. It's the stupidest thing that doesn't make sense. A simple solution is to just have Palpatine openly admit to creating the clones as "an excuse" of the incidents in Episode I, incidents which evolve into the Separatist movement. Why hire the bounty hunter who is the template of your clones to kill Padme if you don't want the truth of the clones to be found out? Doesn't anyone find it a bit weird that Jango works for the Separatists and yet Jango also helped create the clone army by being its template? Doesn't that raise some questions? When he said he was hired by Tyranus on the moons of Bogden, nobody follows up on that. Like---NONE OF THIS MAKES LOGICAL SENSE. I HATE IT.

14. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
Honestly, Palpatine should have outright stated that he created Anakin by influencing the Force. That would have given Anakin a more reason to respect Palpatine and be lured under his spell, seeking the power of the Dark Side. It would reflect the "I am your father" moment in the original trilogy. Luke and Leia were born out of real love, while Anakin was born out of a lust for power and control of life. That parallel would have been great. That would have been an underlying "Ohhhhh" moment when you think about why Darth Vader acts like he owes everything to his "master" in the original trilogy.

15. Star Wars Episode VII: A New Hope The Force Awakens
When I heard Disney bought Star Wars, I had misgivings. Nobody believed me. Now look where we are. Let me say this. I love the characters. I don't love the story. How can the supposedly small faction group The First Order make a massive Death Star planet without anybody realizing? Who were those people they killed? Should we care about them? Why does Maz have Anakin's lightsaber when we last saw it fall down the depths of Cloud City? The plot moves for the sake of moving it. I hate how Rey just suddenly hears a voice in Maz's place and finds the lightsaber. "What's that? It's the plot calling me now. I have to go downstairs to keep the movie going." It doesn't feel organic. It. Just. Happens.

The copy and paste of the skeletal structure of New Hope is so watered down. The final battle doesn't have any umph to it. In the Battle of Yavin we cared about what was going on. The final battle with Starkiller Base is so mundane that you can have an aneurysm and not miss anything. We're only here to care about what happens to Rey and company, while the actual assault on Starkiller Base is just there as filler. You can even feel it in the movie's score. The Battle of Yavin has an epic 9 minute score. The music that plays during the attack of Starkiller Base is just the Star Wars theme repeating for about 5 minutes over and over. It's like John Williams didn't even try, but he didn't have to - because the movie itself didn't even try.

I love Han Solo's role as Obi-wan this time. But by the time we run into Maz, it gets hampered.

16. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
It's alright.

17. Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi
I actually fear criticizing this movie because of all the incels and misogynistic YouTubers who have made YouTube videos with an ungodly run time yelling at SJWs. Man, I just want to give an honest critique of this film that doesn't blame SJW culture or anything like that. It's just not thought-out well. And you know what the real problem is? You know why we're here? We're here because of Star Wars fans. We're at this point because Star Wars fans complain about every little thing. We were SO loud about hating the prequels that they said "Okay so let's basically remake the original trilogy" AND WE STILL HATE IT and it's disgusting. We ruined Jake Lloyd's life. We said so many mean things to Lucas. And now we're bashing the sequel trilogy and people have targeted Kelly Marie Tran. We just don't learn. We're just so **** disgustingly reactionary. Everyone has their own sense of what "Star Wars should be like" - and honestly I don't even think Lucas himself knows what Star Wars should be like. He just wanted to make a Flash Gordon movie and then ended up making Star Wars instead.

I REALLY like the idea of Poe Dameron being a hotspot pilot who actually ended up ruining everything trying to be all macho. It puts a spin on his character from Force Awakens. I don't like how it was executed. There is no reason for Holdo to withhold the plan unless there was a mole onboard their ship or something. Many things don't quite make sense from the viewpoint of the series as a whole. I like the idea of Luke forsaking the Jedi way after he learns about what happened in the prequel trilogy. I don't like how he left his own friends and never faced Kylo Ren. That's just basic responsibility. Yoda and Obi-wan going into exile makes sense because the entire galaxy fell under the Empire and the entire Jedi order was just executed. But this is now a time when the Republic is back in power, so Luke has no reason to hide.

Yoda being able to cause a lightning strike as a Force ghost is a big "Whaaaaat?" That puts a huge hole in everything. I like to think he didn't do it himself. It was just coincidence. We also never actually looked into the Jedi texts so I didn't really care about them to begin with.

There's so much wrong plot-wise with this movie but it could take up pages. Actually, Cinema Sins already mentioned most of what was on my mind already. So just watch that.

Thematically though, I love it. I love the underlying theme of not choosing a side. Benecio del Toro's character and the casino planet foreshadows Kylo Ren's decision to kill the Supreme Leader and "let it all die". Don't choose a side. That fight in the throne room was so cool, until you look closely and actually pay attention to the really poor choreography lmao. Anakin's lightsaber blowing up is really cool symbolically and thematically, but again, if there's no reason explained for how Maz got it then it's just contrived.
I have an idea where IX is going to go and I hope it goes that way. Prequel trilogy - Jedi in power. Original trilogy - Sith in power. Sequel trilogy - no side in power.

(By the way, the Knights of Ren are still a thing, right? They're like. Out there somewhere?)

18. Solo: A Star Wars Story
Underrated picture IMO. People were tired of Star Wars at this point and nobody cared. Comparing the Star Wars universe to the MCU doesn't make sense either. The MCU has thousands of characters and storylines and stories and atmospheres. Star Wars has a much smaller universe and EVERYONE already knows how the main story went. I bet you a million dollars people would have been pumped for this movie had it been released in Rogue One's place at the time. It has its rough edges that needed to be smoothed out but it's a fun romp. YouTubers complain about SJW culture in L-3. However, she kept the theme of "rebellion" at this time period in the galaxy's history. She still serves a purpose by having them succeed on Kessel. It's also a question of perspective. It's a pretty standard story and had it been released years earlier would people have complained about L-3 then? Complaining about SJWs didn't exist back then, so would they have just seen L-3 as a fun kooky rebellious character? The score to this film, by the way, is AMAZING. I hope John Powell takes the reins after Williams retires from Star Wars.

19. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Good film. Bit slow. But you can clearly see it's Tarantino's love letter to the 60's.

20. Zodiac
ALWAYS WANTED TO SEE THIS. I'm a fanatic about cold cases and stuff like this. This brought attention to many more details that I didn't know about the Zodiac case.

21. Away We Go
Funny artsy rom-com with Jim from the Office and Maya Rudolph. I wasn't sure about it in the beginning but halfway through I was howling with laughter.

22. Venom
Meh. It had potential but it's like watching a beta version of a video game. Also there are two blatant continuity errors with daytime/nighttime and that REALLY annoys me.

23. Shazam!
Great stuff!

24. Hereditary
I FINALLY SAW THIS MOVIE AND IT WAS AMAZING. I wasn't as scared as I was very disturbed. Very.

26. Detective Pikachu
Definitely one of the better video game movies. Saw the ending miles away when only the trailers were out. Even still, I liked it.

27. Ocean's 8
I always wanted to see this too and I was. . .thoroughly underwhelmed. I actually fell asleep. The star-studded cast was there and the characters were there. The story is. . .just. . .mundane. They just go do a thing. And they do it. The End.

28. Sabrina
Yet another movie I always wanted to see, and became underwhelmed by. This is the original 1954 film with Humphrey Bogart and Audrey Hepburn. I just felt this was too bland. I also fell asleep.

29. Toy Story 4
Perfect.

30. The Farewell
Girlfriend had really wanted to see this and I saw it with her. Great film!

The Sylvester Stallone is a trucker and tries to bond with his estranged son while arm wrestling movie. The plot is insipid and the movie itself interminable. The pacing comes to a screeching halt 2/3rds in turning a 90 minute movie into something that feels like 3 hours. Completely stupid and unbelievable events occur without any sense of irony. Still, I can't hate it absolutely. In a technical sense, it's not a badly made movie by any means. Competently shot, directed, and even acted for the most part. There are a handful of nice moments between Stallone's character and his son that show a glimpse of what a less stupid, more genuine film about a boy bonding with his father may look like.

abominable was cute, plot is not anything to write home about but it had really gorgeous animation and good dialogue and fun characters.

frozen is just as "meh" as i remember it being. Let It Go is still a really powerful sequence and the rest of the movie pretty much sucks. it is so busy touting how it isn't About Romance that it never shuts up about romance, Elsa is the most interesting character and she's offscreen for 90% of it, the Hans reveal was stupid and added nothing but a convenient excuse to circumvent real dialogue about relationships, and no one actually solved any of the main conflicts in any meaningful capacity.

A compelling movie for most of the time, and has some very striking visuals, but falls short in the last part by some abrupt, weirdly handled plot elements and extremely clumsily shoehorned-in character development.

A compelling movie for most of the time, and has some very striking visuals, but falls short in the last part by some abrupt, weirdly handled plot elements and extremely clumsily shoehorned-in character development.

I don't know this movie but that exact review applies to SO, SOOOO many pieces of media it's really unfortunate

Well, I was dragged to Joker. If I don't read too deeply into it then it's a great film. But I do, of course. I can't help but shake the feeling that the film carries very subtle pro-gun control and anti-white messages. Probably not though. I can also see why some people were spooked by it.

Anyway, it's almost a perfect movie. Nitpicks; I feel like Joker was too fragile, too incompetent, like he's just a loon named Joker and not a criminal mastermind. I also think that the final couple scenes were tacked on unnecessarily and it would've ended better without them.

Acting and camera work, sound design is perfect. The midget is hilarious. I like the themes a lot. Overall, one of the best movies I've ever seen, which I didn't expect from a Marvel or DC type of movie. I'd put it just below the Spider-Man trilogy and Unbreakable for "superhero" movies, and maybe cracks my top 15 overall movies.