8.02.2012

what's UP, y'all!!! thought you might like a glimpse of what's in the trunk of this stretch cooper... fabric scraps! and you thought it would just be fulla booze. these pieces of happiness are making their way to sew LA's promaballoona, where tipsy prom princesses will fashion them into corsages. just in case their dates didn't provide them with flowers, as our next guest's gent so thoughtfully did...

so far, as amy pointed out in the comments, i've met everyone in this limo in realio life. how did that happen?! here's an exception to that rule: i first "met" karen of did you make that in her amped up me-made challenge... because wearing a daily me-made wasn't enough, she set the personal goal of taking pictures in the wild, avec strangers, and it was a LAUGH RIOT. i've been spitting out coffee over her posts ever since, and gnashing my teeth when i missed her stateside not once, but TWICE. she's got a lovely tale, and it is entitled:

SHOUT ‘YES’!

My prom story is a salutary tale of scheming females and dumb broads. Can you guess which I was at 17 years of age? But I’m getting ahead of myself. Oonaballoona invited me to share a prom story and share it I shall.

I was studying for my A-levels in Sixth Form. Life was about to get heartbreakingly unhappy at university, but I didn’t know that then. I was still swimming merrily in my little pond with a gang of firm friends. I was so innocent, it makes me ache to remember.

Jeremy was in the year above me. I’d been harbouring a massive crush on him ever since we’d gone on the same school trip to France. I should have known from the way he danced with our French tutor that he was as deep as a puddle, but hey – I was young and in love.

Back home, a neighbouring school announced a prom night! Prom events were virtually unheard of in the UK then (we’re talking the last gasps of the Eighties) and the mere suggestion of such an occasion conjured pictures of impossible glamour.

I didn’t wait for Jeremy to ask me to go; I invited him. I set about losing as much weight as I could, because I’m pathetic that way. I bought a new dress (in hindsight, startlingly unoriginal and way too old for my years), got my hair cut and coloured, and dreamed, dreamed, dreamed of our future romantic evening. The prom was a Valentine’s Prom and my birthday was on Valentine’s Day – a sure fire recipe for the happiest evening of my life. And it nearly was the happiest evening of my life. Until the phone call came through…

Jeremy had an ex-girlfriend. She was still in love with him. She called me disingenuously to share the excitement of my plans. She dropped into the conversation, ‘You’ll probably kiss him, won’t you?’ The unhappiness leaked from her voice and, like a fool, I felt sorry for her. ‘I won’t,’ I promised. You know what? I meant it. The manipulative madam had pushed me into a corner and now I was tying my own wrists to the railings. I must have had ‘MUG’ tattooed across my forehead.

I went to the prom with Jeremy, floating on a cloud of happiness. In front of everyone, the DJ presented me with a surprise bouquet that Jeremy had bought me for my birthday. We danced. A friend came over. ‘Kiss him!’ she cried. I shook my head, remembering the girl who was sitting alone on a sofa. Jeremy looked puzzled. My dad drove him home. I waved goodbye. As the car pulled away, I wondered … had I made the right choice?

She phoned again the next morning. I told her she didn’t need to worry, that I hadn’t kissed Jeremy. Several months later she started lying to me about when the gang were going out so that she could avoid me being around him. They never did get back together.

Later, I’d have a brief romance with Jeremy but then he went to university and within the first couple of weeks I was dumped. It didn’t hurt too much – I think I knew he wasn’t a keeper. But I learned a really big lesson when I was 17 years old. Let me pass it on to you now.

peeps, are you with me? because i'm getting a posse together, we're jumping in the time machine, and we are going after that ex girlfriend!!! NO ONE MESSES WITH KAREN!

all right. we've all got our game face on in the limo. it's time for a hella shout yes. i wonder who we can pick up next to get this throwdown started.... let's meet back here for cocktail hour today and find out...

So many thoughts on this. First, you were WAY too cute for nasty, stain-on-his-shirt Jeremy. Second, what is that huge paper thing in the 5th photo? Is it the bouquet? You got a pic of the paper but not the flowers? Finally, OMG, your punchline should be a nice-girls anthem. Shout YES!Great, great story and pictures. I don't think life would be nearly as entertaining without our bitchy nemesises. nemisesis. nemesi. Frenemies. Thanks for sharing!

What Katrina said, especially about you being way too nice for a boy who runs around with a stain on his shirt. You look marvelous in your photos!! Thank you for sharing all of these fabulous photos and your great story!

Aww! Well, high school (or equivalent) is just full of missed opportunities, isn't it? (Mine sure was, in hindsight. Not to mention major screw-ups. Much as I regret the mistakes, though, I suspect I needed to make them... to learn not to make them in the future. Hmmm.)

I kinda want to gut punch the ex for this bit of bitchy subterfuge she managed to pull off. I'm glad you got your kiss later, if only to be sure that you missed out on NOTHING by going without it the first time around.

Ah, it would have been a perfect ending to a perfectly dreamed up night, but who knows what the delisional ex would have done in revenge: spread ridiculous rumours about your virtue most likely. Isn't that what nasty teenage girls do?

Lesson learned, and aren't we all the better for it? I bet that ex isn't out cruising the streets in a stretch limo with a gang of awesome sewers / sewists / sewaraurus rexes / sewintists!