Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Worst Tattoos You Can Get

I know I look squeaky clean and about as cool as most sit-com dads, but I do like tattoos. I have a few myself and so do others in my family. When choosing a tattoo, my philosophy is that you should choose wisely because you are, for the most part, stuck with that on your body forever more. Some people aren’t so picky though. Based on seeing others, these are my top ten worst possible tattoo choices. In the comments, tell me what your ideas are.

10. A corporate logo: I like a lot of products, but not so much I’d tattoo them on me. I’ve heard of people being paid to have a logo tattooed on them. No thanks. What if in ten years you find out that company has been poisoning people or making hamburgers out of puppies?

9. Someone’s name: Through a job I once had, I knew a couple that had each others names tattooed on their necks, so of course they broke up. Maybe your name and home address with the phrase “If found, return to:” just in case you pass out somewhere.

8. Face tattoo: The news came out yesterday that Justin Bieber got a face tattoo. Of course he did. He’s a moron. His is just a tiny cross beneath his eye, but others have certainly done much worse on their faces.

The Hangover

7. The permanent makeup: Sounds like a great idea right? Never have to put eyeliner or lipstick on again! I don’t get it. I think 99% of women look better without makeup.

6. A band name: Unless it’s The Beatles, can anyone think of any band right now that we’ll still consider brilliant 40 years from now? Who’s got that One Direction tattoo? Anyone?

5. A cartoon character: I like SpongeBob as much as the next guy, but I’m pretty sure that when I’m 80 I’m not going to be into Scooby Doo, or SpongeBob, or Batman as much as I was when I was young. Also, when I’m 80 my grandchildren will wonder who all those weird characters on me are.

4. The bar code: The first time I heard of some one getting a bar code tattooed on the back of their neck I thought it was hilarious. Outside of that first dude, the rest of the people that did it are stupid and unoriginal.

3. A ghost shaped like a penis: The last time I got a tattoo, I asked the artist what was the stupidest tattoo anyone had ever requested from her. Yes, a ghost shaped like a penis. She showed me a picture.

2. The WordPress logo: I’m pretty sure that even if I got a WordPress tattoo and posted a picture of it on my blog every day for a year, I’d still never get Freshly Pressed. Jerks. If they did offer to Freshly Press a post of my choice from my blog if I get a WordPress tattoo…yes, I’d do it.

1. The neck tattoo: Not only do I imagine that the neck would be a painful place to get a tattoo, but unless you’re willing to wear a turtleneck, that neck tattoo will be the first thing anyone notices about you. That’s why Steve Jobs always wore a turtleneck. He was hiding an Apple tattoo he had gotten when he was drunk. It’s possible I just made that up.

So those are my ideas for the top ten worst possible types of tattoos. What are yours? Do you have tattoos? Do you like tattoos? Do you hate tattoos? Is there one you’re dying to get? Do you have one you regret?

34 responses to “Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Worst Tattoos You Can Get”

I would like to get a tattoo of a butt on my butt, uhhhh, hehehheheheheh. Just kidding! I don’t have any tattoos. I am afraid I’d choose poorly and regret it the rest of my life. What are your tattoos? I know you have the pink ribbon, but what else?

I’m not a fan. I just don’t get the attraction to paint the skin … but to each their own.

My favourite story is one my niece told me. Her friend in high school had Elmo tattoo’ed around her belly button. Later in her 20s when she married and got pregnant, Elmo became a monster. Try picturing that sorry mess at 80 years old 😉

I have tattoos, I like tattoos but the worst is when someone notices mine and then wants to show me their moronic ones. Recently, a “lady” pulled down her shirt to reveal her Tazmanian Devil,boob tattoo. She also had a Tweety Bird on her arm. Why? Just. Why?

Sure thing!
1). A half sleeve of hearts on my left arm. It was copied from a drawing that Derek made for me on our first Valentine’s together. I waited four years to get it done (just in case), and we’ve been together for 11 years. 😜
2). A hibiscus because that was my Mother’s favorite flower. She passed away in 99′.
3). A wrist tattoo with an Indian/henna design. I got it when I was making plans to move to India and work in an orphanage.
4). A tramp stamp of some vines and flowers. Hey, it was my first one, and that was cool back then!!! It’s the only one I kind of regret, but I don’t have to look at it.
My next one will be the shape of Texas on my forearm. Yeehaw!

Ha! You just know that tattoo artists are swapping stories about these. Some of them have to wake up just hating themselves, thinking “I can’t believe I went to art school so I could etch a wasted, Satanic Colonel Sanders on some pothead’s back.”