How I Met My Midwife

It wasn’t until the fourth month of my first pregnancy that I learned home birth was an option.

No one I knew had given birth at home.

I’d never heard of it. But when I did, when I heard those words uttered, I knew home birth was the right choice for me. I can say now that the moment itself – just discovering home birth, was a spiritual experience.

I was attending a talk by Suzanne Arms by recommendation of a local doula and childbirth instructor whom I had been emailing with. All I knew about Suzanne was she was a ‘natural childbirth advocate.’

Those simple words could never have prepared me for what I was about to learn that night or who I would meet.

Sure, I was a hormonal first time pregnant woman. But Suzanne’s speech blew me out of the water. My eyes were literally tearing every five minutes (or less). I feel strongly that her words helped inspire and shape my devotion and desire to make the world a better place for birthing mothers.

My fiance Eric was sitting next to me on the right. A long haired natural-looking woman was sitting to my left. There came a time to partner with someone we didn’t know for a discussion and I turned to my left, but the woman had turned to her left as well. So I turned around and talked to someone else.

When the event ended and we walked to our car in the crisp Fall air, I told Eric I wanted to birth at home.

Even I was surprised at the seriousness in my voice.

I was more surprised at the feeling of certainty in my being. I knew home birth would be the perfect way to welcome our baby girl into the world. While the conversation continued, he (thankfully) trusted in intuition.

I continued emailing with the Jessica English, the doula who suggested I attend the Suzanne Arms talk. Eric and I enrolled in her natural childbirth education class at Birth Kalamazoo. At the end of our first class we discussed home birth and she gave me the name a home birth midwife.

Then she told me that midwife
was actually sitting next to me at Suzanne’s speech.

My heart raised into my throat. I got all hot. This was exactly how I felt when I learned about home birth that night. Like my body was sending out electricity. My gut told me she would be our midwife. And she was.

I love my midwife.

What else can I say? I could tell you all about how fantastic she was during prenatal visits – how blessed I felt to be cared for by someone who actually cared.

I could tell you about her super-powers during my labor – how she quietly sat on the couch observing me but rarely speaking a word. She disappeared and let me birth until those crucial moments when I needed her.

Or what about the birth of my daughter itself? That serious but calm look on her face as she told me NOT to push, but to “mmmm” in a low voice? Ella crowned slowly and I didn’t tear.

When we discovered I was pregnant again, I was overjoyed to call our midwife with the news, eager to welcome her into our lives again.

This journey has been incredible with her as my midwife for the second time. And I’m so glad to have her the whole time rather than just the last few months. The care she provides is night and day from the hospital – a happy welcome.

I celebrate The International Day of the Midwife reminiscing and feeling grateful for my midwife.

7 Comments so far

What a beautiful story…so sweet and honest. As blessed as we feel to have our midwives in our lives, I’m sure Linda feels blessed to know someone like you. I nearly cried just reading this! You give women hope for their births and their babies– Hope, knowing that we do have a say in how and with whom we bring our children into the world. Home birth is peaceful and powerful… I feel so thankful for the midwives who have felt called to it. Much, much love to them and to you.

I met my midwife through other women that had given birth at home. In my state, it’s illegal to have a midwife attend your home birth, so it’s very secretive. I had to call a friend that gave birth at home and give her my contact info to give to the midwife. She then called me. I absolutely adore my midwife…I was really sad at the last postpartum visit when I realized I wouldn’t be seeing her monthly anymore!

I knew my midwife for some time before she became my midwife. My mom is a doula and has worked with her numerous times attending births. She came to visit at our house a few times while I was still living at home and my mom had her and some ladies from LLL over occasionally so I sort of knew her. When my husband and I got pregnant, I knew almost right away I wanted a HB. We had an interview with her but I knew before then I wanted her to attend our birth. She’s the most gentle, kind, loving spirit and I couldn’t imagine having had anyone else attend our sons birth, or our upcoming birth this fall we had a prenatal with her again tonight and she’s just simply awesome. I LOVE MY MIDWIFE!!!

I met my midwife when I went to visit a friend the day after her homebirth, and the midwife was there for her checkup. Having said that, I had heard about her numerous times before that. You can’t help it when you’ve been the only private midwife in a city of almost 1 million for 14 years!
Then I started taking my then 1-year-old to her for swimming lessons, and things developed from there. Now I’m going to her for ante-natal aqua classes too!
She knows I’m really keen to be a midwife myself, so I feel it does change the relationship a little, for the better I think.
8 weeks to go!

i actually met my mw at a midwives day potluck picnic when i was 12 weeks pregnant with my 2nd. My doula told her i was pregnant and intrested in a homebirth and we chatted briefly and i told her i would call soon. I lost the baby a few days later. Then about a year later at about 24 weeks pregnant i decided it was safe to call her. She came to our house and i immediately knew she was the perfect person…but more importantly my husband knew. He had been on the fence about homebirth, but meeting her took all his fears and worries away.