Camp Movie Night: The Star Wars Holiday Special

When: Wed., Dec. 16, 8 p.m. 2015

It’s almost here. Star Wars: The Force Awakens opens in theaters this Friday, Dec. 18, and is set to become the biggest movie release of all goddamn time. But are your expectations set too high? Are you ensuring that you endure prequel-level disappointment by putting J.J. Abrams’ take on a galaxy far, far away on a pedestal before you even see it? Fear not. Marc With a C is here to knock down your enthusiasm several levels by hosting a screening of the notorious 1978 Star Wars Holiday Special, which aired exactly one time on CBS and was so hated that it was never rebroadcasted or released on home media in any form. For some reason, the producers of the special felt like alienating the audience right away by having the majority of the dialogue be in Shyriiwook. (That’s the main Wookiee language, which has more than 150 words for “wood.” Thanks, Wookieepedia!) Watch as Chewbacca’s wife, Malla, learns how to cook from a four-armed Harvey Korman. Cringe as Chewie’s dad, Itchy, gets really into a borderline pornographic performance by singer Diahann Carroll. Be grateful when Bea Arthur sings a song about closing time at the Mos Eisley cantina because it means you’re almost done. After watching this special, it will be impossible to be let down by The Force Awakens, even if Kylo Ren turns out to be the secret identity of Jar Jar Binks. – Thaddeus McCollum