4 Items That Make Anal Sex Way More Comfortable

Even though anal sex is becoming increasingly popular both as an act and as a topic of conversation, plenty of people are still (understandably) nervous about trying it themselves. The idea of trying to fit something up there can be daunting if you're not accustomed to it, especially without the natural lube vaginal sex typically supplies.

Remember, there's no pressure to do something you're not 100 percent into. As Good Vibrations' staff sexologist Carol Queen, Ph.D., puts it: "This isn’t a good birthday present for the boo if deep down, you really don’t want it." But if you're hoping to overcome your anal sex anxieties, there are some toys that can help.

Here are some products that can let you ease more comfortably into anal sex, or at least determine if you want to go all the way:

Anyone who's had anal sex before agrees on one thing: Lube is crucial. "No one should be doing any anal sexing without this fine stuff," says Queen. Lube not only makes anal play more comfortable but can also help prevent tears that lead to STIs. Sex therapist Vanessa Marin's favorite is Wicked Sensual Care Anal Jelle, since it's extra slippery.

Butt plugs are a good way to introduce anal play because they're often pretty small and slide in easily. While a lot of anal plugs are aimed more at stimulating the male prostate, Marin recommends this line for women. Queen suggests first trying finger play, figuring out how much you can handle, and then picking a plug with a diameter around that size at its widest point. Njoy's Pure Plugs come in three sizes, so you can use a bigger one as you get more comfortable. "But don’t just use these as dilators," Queen warns. "Anal sex isn’t about stretching out. It’s about enjoying being anally penetrated, which allows you to relax."

You and your partner can have fun together with this favorite of Marin's. They can add vibration through a remote or an app while inside you. And FYI, any of these can be used on a male or female partner, but this one's especially ideal for anyone with a prostate or perineum because it has two different modes geared toward stimulating those parts.

This can be used in the vagina or anus, and its smooth surface will help beginners stay comfortable, says Queen. It also comes in two sizes, so you can start with the smaller one and work your way up to a bigger one. Dildos are a bit more advanced than butt plugs, since they're designed more for in-and-out motion than staying in place. You may even want to put in a plug and get comfortable before taking it out and replacing it with a dildo.

Don't jump head-first into anal sex without first testing the waters with toys or fingers, warns Queen. "Porn stars make it look easy," she says, "but anal can be profoundly painful or pleasurable, and knowledge is what gets you to the pleasure." Making a few smart purchases can't hurt either.