Lexicon

What follows are terms and expressions which appear in the posts and comments at Get The Picture and are of particular interest to the Georgia fan base. Some are of my invention; others have been provided by a group of folks who outdid themselves in the comments to this post. The list is subject to change and expansion; feel free to add your suggestions in the comments.

A

Arena(n.) – a special place where people who are critical of a football program have never been.

B

Banished from Valdosta(n.) – something bad that happens that really has virtually no effect on the aggrieved party. (h/t David Hale)

Best Shot (n.) – the superhuman effort Georgia faces from every team on its schedule it should beat on paper.

Beyond Crompton (adj.) – 1. the measurement of a truly incompetent performance by a team, unit, or individual. 2. a completely out-of-nowhere superlative performance by a team, unit or individual who until then had given no indication of such capability. (h/t David Hale)

Big game(n.) – any game that Georgia loses.

Blackout(n.) – [NOTE: this entry has been removed or is no longer valid.]See, Fake Juice. (h/t Andy)

Cowbell compromise(n.) – the act of addressing a problem by passing a rule that no one will follow.

Coxian(adj.) – a type of “what, me worry?” on-field decision by a player who should know better that leads to disaster, e.g., “I kind of saw Norwood and was like, hmmm, but I decided to throw it anyway…”

Dooley-hour(n.) – a unit of distance, measured by how far a member of the University of Tennessee’s coaching staff can travel in a car in one hour.

Dooleyland(n.) – an area mapped and claimed by the noted cartographer and football head coach Derek Dooley. Also known as the State of New Tennessee(n.), it consists of a circle having a radius of three Dooley-hours, centered on its capital, Knoxville. It is not to be confused with a larger region, Aaron Douglas’ Home(n.), with which it overlaps and shares certain defining characteristics.

Dooley’s Junkyard Dawgs(n.) – the only extant R&B song with lyrics that include the words “Joel Eaves”.

Doucheoisie(n.) – a member of a class of individuals, usually male, with a variety of negative qualities, specifically arrogance and engaging in obnoxious and/or irritating actions; in college football, the class includes, but is not limited to, certaincoaches, Tom Lemming, Paul Finebaum and John Feinstein. (h/t The Realist)

Dragon*Con(n.) – an event which causes a football scheduling tug-of-war in the hearts of the Georgia Tech faithful.

Herbstreit Doctrine(n.) – the principle that no team that is in a conference may play for the BCS title without first winning its conference championship, except for Ohio State or Michigan and possibly Southern Cal. (NOTE: While the dictates of this rule are generally immutable, Kirk Herbstreit reserves the right to alter them at any time without cause.) (h/t Brandon)

I

Inman(n.) – an ill-timed personal foul by an offensive lineman. Usage: “We were in field goal range until _______ pulled an Inman”. (h/t Brandon)

J

Jonesed(v.) – having to change positions to allow an upperclassman to start, even if he should be 4th string. (h/t Julie)

Jorts(n.) – slang for jean shorts. These are most often worn by the fashion illiterate and the fan base of the University of Florida. (via Urban Dictionary)

PH™, or Preseason Homerism (n.) – prior to the start of the season, a fan’s quasi-religious conviction that his or her previously mediocre program is destined for greatness in the upcoming year, based on the belief that every shortcoming which contributed to the prior lack of success has been overcome, coupled with the equally deeply held notion that none of said team’s rivals have addressed theirs.

SOD(n.) – acronym for Son Of Dooley; refers to Derek Dooley, the orange pants-wearing fruit of Vince and Barbara Dooley’s loins.

T

Third and Willie (n.) – a situation when a defense has absolutely no chance of stopping a (usually long) 3rd down conversion. Sometimes referred to as Third and Grantham. (h/t Trey)

Throwaway Season(n.) – the time when a Georgia fan should lower expectations, but not financial support, for the program in hopes of a brighter future, based on a suggested plan that is both vague and definite all at once. See also, Dantzlering.

Yaw yaw yaw yaw yaw yaw yaw footbaw(n.) – the way a Cajun says “football” after his seventh Red Bull of the morning.

Year of the Gamecock(n.) – an era currently spanning the period from the second week of January to about the middle of the month of October for the years 1992-2010.

Z

Zabransky’d(v.) – 1. being exposed in front of a national audience as a falsely hyped program which reputation was built beating up on patsies by scheduling a difficult season opener against a quality team in the best conference in the country in order to bring positive attention to said program. (h/t Puffdawg) 2. being asked repeatedly to verify the religious affiliation of a football player whose career you haven’t closely followed.

1-Les Miles- A fourth and dumb play that is so incredibly idiotic that it works. 2- Martinized- when a cornerback stares into the backfield long after a play action fake he can be said to have been Martinized. 3- One hour Martinizing- The art of giving up forty points to an inCrompetent QB in one football game. A feat requiring rare ability by a DC.

Dooleyfense- in American football an extremely conservative offense designed to lull opposing defenses, and one’s own fans, to sleep. One only passes,[ie. throws the football], when opposing defensive backs have begun throwing rocks at the scoreboard or are engaged in a crap game behind the goal post. see also “Beamerball”.

You need one for “Clemins” explaining why you refer to Clemson that way. You also need to add “teh awesome” explaining what the heck that’s all about. You certainly use those frequently enough to deserve space here.

I thought “chosen reservoir” was good and pertinent. Its a takeoff on an army battle fought during the Korean War where we were bottled up at Chosun Reservoir(a small reservoir near the Korean/China border) and cut off by the North Koreans aided by massive Chinese troops . We were in danger of losing an entire Division, but fought valiantly to break out and escape. Thereafter MacArthur landed on the eastern peninsular and fought across Korea to separate into two parts at the 38th parallel and prevented the Red Chinese Army from solidifying all of Korea.

Dawg in Fla was alluding to Murray’s Jewish background and as the “chosen one” in this small reservoir of QBs to lead us out of sure destruction. The matchup is clever and pertinent. I apologize for the history lesson that you probably knew, but thought perhaps everone else didn’t. Consider this my first lobby to a good cause.

gatorbate: Sexual self-gratification by florida fans, players & corches. Use (note: this is purely hypothetical): After taking an oath to remain a virgin, the florida QB’s only option for sex was to gatorbate. Unfortunately, it became so frequent and vigorous that by the end of the season it damaged his arm, requiring him to develop a new throwing motion for the NFL scouts.

Knowshon (v.): 1. to extraordinarily and suddenly leave the ground while in forward motion in a highlight-reel manner and render an opponent confused and therefore useless to his football team. Ex. Central Michigan and Arizona State 2008

2. to turn an individual or group of people into dancing fools when it is least appropriate. Ex. Auburn Blackout 2007, players and announcers

Pearl-Harbored (synonymous with 9/11’d) – describes the condition of a traditional CFB power being defeated by an absolute bottom-feeder from a lower division; as when Nick Saban compared Bama’s 2007 loss to Louisiana-Monroe to two of the darkest days in American history.
One could also perhaps tease out an alternative – but archaic in CFB terms -usage from the Miami vs Penn Statematchup in January 1987 when the Canes’ Thug Era was in its fullest flower. One of their star players, Jerome Brown, proclaimed at a steak dinner that was hosting both teams that sitting down to dinner with the Nittanies made as much sense as the Japanese sitting down with “Pearl Harbor”; then he proceeded to lead his team in a walkout from the dinner. However, it was the highly favored Canes which lost the actual battle on the field, 14-7 – although that was a closer score than the final result of the actual war to which Brown so foolishly referred.

I thought the Herbstreit Doctrine was to rationalize the Big 10 into a national title game at all costs, even if it means contradicting your earlier logic. What you described was only a side-effect of the overall doctrine (conference title requirement vs. “Who are the two best teams in the nation right now?”)

Goffed – grossly underutilizing talent by playing players out of position or failing to give them an opportunity to succeed. Examples include the 1994 season which saw Hines Ward at running back, Robert Edwards at corner, and Terrell Davis on the bench. Usually this statement can only be made years after it happened. ex. Knowshon was Goffed in 2006.

Driving Mudcat’s car – (v.) repeating the same stupid mistake over and over (can be used in conjunction with other words on the list) ex. – “We were facing another third and Willie, but instead of blitzing, we ended up driving Mudcat’s car and played cover two again.”

Aww man, you must absolutely use 3 that I don’t see up on the lexicon…JC in Powder Springs had 3 great ones: Tebloviate, Wyndhamed, and Wynd-surfing. I literally blew coffee out of my nose at the last one. Should go in the lexicon if for no other reason than the funny factor is through the roof.

Dawgstalgia – (n) living in the Bulldog Glory Years that ended in the 80s.

Dawg License (n) what our Bulldog moped drivers often fail to get.

Geridawgs (n) the elderly fans in Sanford that get blamed or are responsible for the disappointing sound levels in Sanford Stadium on gameday.

Russ – Otto Award (n) given to outstanding performance by a substitute player

Track Fan (n) fans who “stole” money from Dooley by watching football games from the railroad tracks prior to the 1981 season.

St. Simon (n) a fan whose team wins one game against its rival every ten years

Jasper (n) an officiating call indicating an fumble that never happened; can also refer to any erroneous officiating call

Half time (n) the idiosyncratic condition in which a football team is unable to execute a play on offense and/or defend its goal line for either the first 30 minutes or the last 30 minutes of a football game.

Special Needs Teams (n) a special teams unit using second, third, or fourth team players to field kickoff/punt coverage, kickoff/punt returns

Canine Inferiority Complex (n) a Dawg fan at home thinking that every play by play and/or color commentator on TV is rooting for the other team

HBTD (phrase) How ’bout them Dawgs!

Between the Hedges (n) reference to the field at Sanford Stadium

Silver Britches (n) silver pants worn by the Georgia Football team; a reference to the football team

Those comments were some of the funniest I have read on here, it was heaven sent for me I was stuck in a seminar the day I was reading it. I liked whoever it was that suggested calling Les Miles, “Das Hat”. “Willie Fingers” (faceguarding), “Chapaquitic” (3rd Down Full back dive), and “Know No” (redshirting grade A talent) were also some funny ones that were left out but I understand the need to cut it down.

Holdin’ the panties (v) – The in-explainable act of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. 2. While having the summit of your career within a breath, you enter into an act of such sheer stupidity that you lose everything that you had gained to that point. Usage: 1). Well, he was on the verge of a $550,000 paycheck. Yea, he’s holdin’ the panties on that one.

After the Cam Newton allegations, a new term has developed. The person asking for money for Newton wanted $200,000, but offered Mississippi State at discount of $180,000. That is 10% off. Here is my suggestion:

How about ” A Richtsquibber” – When a head coach makes a game losing epically stupid decision. Also used as a verb “Richtsquibbing” – when a coach coaches not to lose due to lack of trust in his players

Quote Of The Day

“But outside of that, the biggest advantage you can have is have good leadership, have a veteran football team, and when you’ve got that, it doesn’t matter whether you have spring practice or not. When you don’t have that, it’s tougher, when you don’t have leadership and you don’t have the experience at certain positions.”— Kirby Smart, Dawgs247, 3/31/20