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Newspaper Page Text

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HE WAS AHEAD
An old gentleman who lived
near a large boarding school had
so many panes of glass broken in
his greenhouse that he tempted
the boys to tell on one another by
offering $5 reward to informers.
The plan met with immediate
success.
"Please, sir, Tom Smith has
broken a pane of glass," jpiped a
bright-eyed youngster, holding
out an eager hand for the reward.
Particulars were demanded and
given and the reward honorably
paid.
Then Tom Smith, summoned
by a threatening note, presented
himself to make good the dafnage
done?
"You here again?" gasped the
astonished old gentleman. "You
are not Tom Smith; you are the
lad who told on him."
"Quite right, sir; but I'm Tom
Smith all the same," answered the
boy, dropping three bright dol
lars on the table. "I broke the
pane myself, and 'thought I'd
claim the reward before anyone
else had the chance. I'm twb dol
lars ahead."
Result Boy engaged as clerk
by old gentleman makes for
tune marries employer's daugh
ter happy ever after.
Small Boy Please, I want the
doctor to come and see mother.
Servant Doctor's out. Where
do you come from?
Small Boy What! Don't you
you know me? Why, we deal with
you. We had a baby from here
only last week
HIS LATEST
The cheerful idiot on his way
home nqticed the host of the Re4
Lion at his porch, who said, "Nice
evening) sir."
"Yes," responded the cheerful
idiot; "quite clear. Had any fog
here today?"
"Not a breath of it, sir."
"Dear me would you believe
it? On my way to town I was 0(1
tne iront seat ot ine omniDus, an
I couldn t see horses' heads.
"Well, well, sir; think of that
Suppose it's because the wind's
in thenor'-east?"
"Perhaps," answered the cheer
ful idiot, "it .may be so ; but the
fact that it was a motor-omnibu
may have had something to d
with it, don't you think?"
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