Like most high-end automobiles manufacturers, Audi makes much of its latest high-tech wizardry.

For those of a performance bent shopping its sleek new S7, they’ll talk up the 4.0 TFSI V8’s twin turbochargers, nestled, à la BMW, in the “vee” in between the engine’s cylinder banks.

For the ecologically minded, they’ll stress that, despite all its 420 horsepower, the big 4.0L is still somewhat frugal because it deactivates cylinders 2,3 5 and 8, literally turning what was a V8 into a V4. And this, being an Audi, they will no doubt focus on the no muss, no fuss driving capabilities of its famed Quattro all-wheel-drive system, now complete with torque vectoring.

Despite what will undoubtedly be a forceful, logical argument in its advertisements, it is all posturing.

The real reason that one longs to own (and the reason this is the road test I have most eagerly awaited in some time) an S7 is because the “four-door coupe” is just so achingly beautiful. Yes, yes, yes, I know it’s shallow, but were we all the pragmatists that we all would like to believe we are, BMW would still be producing its awkwardly-styled 550 GT and Mercedes its boring-as-snot R Class.

Like it or not, sex sells, and if there’s one attribute Audi’s S7 has in spades, it’s an alluring smile. Of course, raw beauty may be what sets your heart afire, but that aforementioned technological wizardry is what builds a lasting relationship and, thankfully, the new Audi backs up its form with (mostly) superior function.

Said V8, for instance, is based on the 4.2 FSI engine that spins so freely in Audi’s fantabulous R8. Destroked to four litres for reduced friction, it also gains two turbochargers and an intercooler to deliver a ton of punch — in this case 420 horsepower — at a much lower rpm than the R8’s high-revving 4.2. Mated to an almost as impressive number of torques — 405 pound-feet to be exact— the S7’s 4.0 TFSI is a much better GT engine than the spine-tingling but anemic-at-low-revs 4.2.

Indeed, mated to Audi’s seven-speed, dual-clutch DSG manumatic, the 4.0L is an ideal high-performance sedan engine, enough torque to guarantee maximum throttle response no matter how slow the engine is trolling and just enough of a top end rush to convince that Camaro rumbling beside you at the stoplight that you’re not to be trifled with.

Nonetheless, the S7 is very much a GT car and not the hard-edged super sports sedans that BMW’s M cars are, or at least used to be. For one thing, the S7 weighs a hardly-light 2,045 kilograms and making matters worse, much of that weight is over the front wheels, meaning that, if one was to meander out onto some closed course for some truly high-speed shenanigans, the S7’s front wheels would start pushing long before the rears.

Audi tries to alleviate this by distributing more of the engine’s prodigious torque to the rear wheels and also instructing the quattro system to direct a larger portion of the rear axle’s torque to the outside wheel. The ministrations do help to disguise the pronounced front weight bias and the S7 steers much more linearly than high-performance Audis of old. Nonetheless, the S7 is much more gran turismo than Formula 1. That said, only those with a very large retainer to their Xcopper and supreme confidence in their paralegals’ lawyering are likely to stretch the S7’s envelope fast enough on public roads to notice any paucity of front end traction.

As for fuel economy, the S7 is a mass of contradictions. In town, it guzzles hi-test like there’s a clearance sale at select Esso stations. But, if you can find a perfectly flat road and are willing to trundle along at a steady 100 per, the digital readout will flash out numbers in the low sevens (as in per 100 kilometres), numbers that might rival a four-cylinder mid-sized sedan. Of course, as soon as you boot it, the darned thing starts sucking back the fossil juice as if you own the entire tar sands. It’s an apt reminder that some modern fuel-conserving technologies only work within very narrow parameters.

Requiring no such qualifications is the interior, the S7’s cabin is all but as luxurious as the S8’s There’s some hand-stitched Valcona leather covering the seats; said perches are both heated and cooled (the rears are also heated but not ventilated) and there’s plenty of legroom, front and rear (though headroom at the rear is not as generous as in the S6).

Like the S8, the S7 offers a Bang & Olufsen audio system that is nothing short of superb. And, even though more than a few other brands are offering sound systems with superior specifications (like the Range Rover’s 29 speakers and 1,700 watts), I am still a huge fan of the B&O system: I guess I am just a sucker for the dashboard’s pop up tweeters.

The S7 is also semi-practical. Being a quasi hatchback, loading the trunk is a doddle and, even though the trunk’s utility is somewhat compromised by the sloping rear roofline, the S7’s rear seats do feature a pass-through. The rear seats also fold down to expand the cargo capacity from 694 litres to something much more commodious.

But practicality is hardly the reason anyone will spend almost a hundred large on an S7. Oh, some might rationalize their purchase with an emphasis on said practical trunk space or even that nifty cylinder de-activation system, but the truth remains that the S7’s form is what sells its function. It really is that alluring.