just because you are a man and it is expected of men to seek out relations with women, does not mean desiring a woman is some kind of special desire exempt from delusion/greed which should not be quelled. seek women only when it is convinient for you to do so, otherwise dont. keep in mind my advice is unorthodox, but every person should be given the opportunity to at least consider it.

Billy wrote:lavezzi, as always spot on though quite depressive but life is a bitch q.e.d.

by all logical conclusions there should be nothing, yet there is an entire complex reality. as complex as it is, there is no need to define it past saying that it is a world of changing forms. sights, sounds, smells etc. all forms which are in constant flux and neutral, equal in value and undifferentiated until comprehended by the mind. if you truly understand internally this concept of the ultimate nature of reality i am speaking of, every time a thought comes into your head which tries to differentiate form you will realize its illusiory nature, there lies liberation from feeling that life is a bitch and instead living in peaceful bliss.

its natural in the sense that our instincts propell us towards the opposite sex in various ways, but what makes us human is our consciousness and highly advanced brains which enable us to not be thrown around by our instincts the way animals are. so i am in fact the one advocating humanism, and you animalism.

I have a working hypothesis ... if you're a guy and below the age of 30, you can't be happy w/o a woman in your life. You're fighting a mix of conditioning and hormones, where reading books about Suzuki & Zen won't do the trick. Plus, if you do any form of Tai Chi or standing Qigong, your general horny-ness will go up.

If you're above, let's say 32, then it's very possible to be happy without women because your hormones won't be the key determinant in your daily behavior patterns. Then, you'll have to look within and see what makes you tick. After this time period, I'd discovered that I didn't need a woman around to be content with my life. Thus, I'd started my post-Brazilian GF era in my mid-30s and have found that life is good, being *socially gay* in New England (meaning not dating AWs or even traveling FWs, but being outgoing and sociable. [Remember, many AWs consider a guy to be gay if they're not actively pursuing women like a desperate buffoon]), but going up to Montreal QC to boink high end esc@rts from time to time, to keep the biological needs in check.

Billy wrote:socially gay is a nice term. i am with you on your working hypothesis. as a young guy full of t. everythin makes you hornier doesnÂ´t matter what except maybe waterboarding and turture.

yes over 30 things can change. i am now also socially gay. i am a closet macho and social gay...haha...

Well there's a catch, if one's an actual closet heterosexual, then there needs to be a full de-coupling between the socializer and the boinker,

Thus, intermittent boinks up in Canada (or down south), need to be on a scheduled basis. As long as a routine holds, chances are, one won't break protocol and attempt to find a GF [ even if it's short term ] within mainstream society's BS.

Realize, in the America, a heterosexual male is someone to be gossiped about and derided behind his back, among female acquaintances. Thus, the fewer you boink, the less trouble which follows you.

S_Parc wrote:I have a working hypothesis ... if you're a guy and below the age of 30, you can't be happy w/o a woman in your life. You're fighting a mix of conditioning and hormones, where reading books about Suzuki & Zen won't do the trick. Plus, if you do any form of Tai Chi or standing Qigong, your general horny-ness will go up.

i am 21 and very happy without a woman. if you quit masturbation you regain full control over your body. hormones can only affect a weak mind. a strong mind can quell desires with ease, sexual or otherwise. believe me i used to be a very sexually hormonal lad and still am technically, but the temptation to indulge is simply not there. without the minds aid sexual desire is powerless.

lavezzi wrote:i am 21 and very happy without a woman. if you quit masturbation you regain full control over your body. hormones can only affect a weak mind. a strong mind can quell desires with ease, sexual or otherwise.

My main concern about Stoicism, in general, is that what's pushed out of the conscious mind can seed itself in the unconsciousness.

Until only a few years ago, I'd never dealt with my downright rage/hatred for my sister. I was good at all that other stuff: schoolwork, career, etc, but I wasn't able to deal with that creeping angst. Well, it's all out in the open today and I've never felt happier.

Thus, I recommend men to refrain from masturbation but I do recommend going to boinking clubs, from time to time, to attune the subconscious mind into *knowing*, that women and intrinsic happiness aren't conjoined. Without that, there's this constant hum in the airwaves that { women --> happiness }. And that sort of cultural hypnosis is not good for the unconscious mind w/o some active treatment for it.

S_Parc wrote:My main concern about Stoicism, in general, is that what's pushed out of the conscious mind can seed itself in the unconsciousness.

Until only a few years ago, I'd never dealt with my downright rage/hatred for my sister. I was good at all that other stuff: schoolwork, career, etc, but I wasn't able to deal with that creeping angst. Well, it's all out in the open today and I've never felt happier.

Thus, I recommend men to refrain from masturbation but I do recommend going to boinking clubs, from time to time, to attune the subconscious mind into *knowing*, that women and intrinsic happiness aren't conjoined. Without that, there's this constant hum in the airwaves that { women --> happiness }. And that sort of cultural hypnosis is not good for the unconscious mind w/o some active treatment for it.

i had a profound awakening back in may of this year. i met my korean (ex) gf soon after which seemed to put me right back to sleep, however it was a very intense relationship that brought me much joy. when she had to go back to her homeland i was very upset for a short period, but then i instantaneously accepted it and experienced a moment of total and utter clarity. since then ive been back into the swing of things spiritually (stoically or whatever you wish to term it). it is very intrinsicly clear to me that in each moment awareness is prior to all mental activity. it would take voluntary attatchment for me to lose this sense of knowing, which aint gonna happen as far as i can sense. so i think i am pretty immune to unconscious frailties.