Utah has the highest internet porn rate in the nation. Porn is a problem for active members because their sexuality has been so twisted and guilted by the church that they have to take what they can get however they can get it. They can't just have a normal, healthy relationship with a woman - and yes, that includes appreciating a woman's body now and again.

So I guess the answer to a Mormon who says something like that is "Well, I can see why you would think that because Mormons are some of the biggest users of porn in the nation so probably most men you know are into it but I'm not one of them. Actually, I left to get away from porn addicts, not to become one."

or

"That's ridiculous. Mormons are some of the biggest users of porn in the nation. If I wanted to look at porn, I'd STAY Mormon, I wouldn't leave."

As someone else said here on another thread, "They're discriminating people who look at porn." It's another form of prejudice, public shaming, and guilt-tripping, and all three of these things are favored weapons of choice within their culture.

This is, to me, perhaps the most infuriating thing about Mormonism. If you leave, or even just doubt some of the doctrine, it is because you are weak and are committing some sort of sin that you need to confess to.

Looking back at everything I've lost by leaving Mormonism (my job, good relationship with my family, social structure), if it had been a simple matter of wanting to watch porn or drink alcohol, it would have been trivial for me to just do that stuff and still pretend to be a good Mormon.

It doesn't take much to hide sin, but hiding complete disbelief is much, much harder.

Supposedly, God runs the Mormon Church through Direct Revelation. Therefore: The church simply HAS TO BE TRUE. IT IS PERFECT BECAUSE GOD IS PERFECT!

For that reason -- any problems that arise must be the MEMBER'S fault. You can't blame God!

So, who else is there?

That's why all the church's problems are absorbed by the membership. Remember the phrase "God's church is perfect, but He only has imperfect people to run it." For this reason, Mormon members end up "atoning" for the sins of their fraudulent religion -- a religion started by sexual predators and sanctimonious, greedy, con men.

Mormonism is a religion that has become overly-abundant with "problems" that now need such member "explanations".

So, everything turns back on the membership. They become sacrificed to maintain the perfection of the church.

When a marriage is in trouble because one spouse needs to be deeply honest about their feelings and discoveries, the church's response is that the spouse must have a "moral problem". How many times have we seen this?

The church creates "guilty victims" in order to save itself!

That's why the following was reported in this post:

"They also asked her about porn; she reassured them -- whether they believed it or not -- that that was not my reason for leaving."

That's also why: "We apostates leave the church, but we won't leave it alone." We are tired of the church calling us immoral, and dishonest, and unrighteous -- when, in fact, it is the Mormon Church ITSELF that is the fraudulent, guilty party!

Every day of the week family and friends become divided by the church, so that the church can remain "true".

Remember, porn destroys families, provided at least one family member has been taught it is an act of deep betrayal. Otherwise, it is just your spouse's disgusting habit that you like teasing him about when the kids are not around.

They want her to doubt you. Even if she defends you, the seed is planted and they will try to manipulate that to the point of trying to get her to forsake you.

They have no answers, and they know that there are no true answers that can support the claims of the church. They are trained to guilt you, and to make every unanswerable isseue into a worthiness interview. It is called Shaming. They anticipate that you would rather bite the bullet and do your job than to be shamed.

When we were still active, DW got a call from one of the bprick guys asking for a meeting. It surprised him when I showed up and would not let him close the door until I was in the room with him. He gave me quite a funny look, but then went along with it. If she were to have gotten a call to meet with two guys, I definitely would have been there, with a can of pepper spray at the very least.