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You know when someone asks you how your day was, and you want to tell them how great it was, but actually it's been a pretty miserable day? You're stuck trying to come up with something to tell them that's good, something other than "I've got a wicked case of Jock Rot" or "my pet rock died." You need a stand in. For me, the stand in of the last week has been Assassin's Creed.

With a spelling error in the title, a domicile on a sometimes technically inept console, and membership in a genre that prides itself on redundancy, expectations are not particularly high for Gley Lancer. “A shoot-em-up,” said I, “on the Mega Drive no less! I look forward to the suicidal alien pilots, ear-bleeding music, grainy graphics, and a selection of generic weapons ranging from lasers to different color lasers to bullets that fire so fast that they are actually just a different k...

Multiple accidents and numerous carjackings later, you’ll find the gang’s hideaway. There you have to kill everybody while seeking the child’s location. Accomplish this and you’ll be rewarded with another lengthy cut scene where you learn that Mark is in way over his head. Blackmailed by Bethnal Green boss, Charlie Jolson, and his henchmen, Hammond is forced to obey the man’s every whim or else lose his boy forever.

It’s so easy to take for granted. The wind, I mean. Science explains it as the reaction to pressure between two adjacent air masses. Nothing more, nothing less. But for the folks that have a bit more imagination within their grasp, the wind can be mysterious and otherworldly. You can’t see it, but its presence is all too clear. It could be that slight breeze tickling the back of your neck in the early morning. Or maybe it’s that sudden burst of air that sends you a face-full of raindrops during ...

Button mashing will see you through every battle, even at the highest difficulty. There’s no real system of commands that demand mastering. Just back your enemy to the end of the screen and wail away. They’ll be caught in a trap of constant abuse in which they can scarcely land a hit, one in which escape is impossible save for jumping. But they’re often too stupid for that.

The Devil May Cry series hasn't exactly been consistent. While the original game was a unique and ultra-stylish masterpiece, the second outing was a universally reviled mess. The third game had the gameplay back on track, but was deemed too tricky by all but the most hardcore of action fans. It turns out that the fourth time's the charm, because Devil May Cry 4 is as good as the self-proclaimed "hard stylish action" franchise has ever been.

Just when you thought Activision couldn’t milk the Guitar Hero franchise anymore, they go on and make a handheld version of the plastic guitar rhythm-based game. Aside from Harmonix’s Phase for the iPod, one would wonder how a handheld Guitar Hero would work. Well, you’d include a mini fret board, utilize some of the DS’s features, slap on a $50 price point and voila, Guitar Hero: On Tour is born.

Now, I’ve only played a handful of games that I’d describe as truly awful. These games were either unplayable due to horrible controls, an awful grasp of the subject matter or they were just plain boring. However, despite my exposure to these horrible titles, nothing in the world could prepare me for the sheer atrocity that is INXS: Make my Video. One of the three video-editing (and I use that term lightly) games (that one too) released on the Sega Mega CD, this title follows the fad of...

XIII is a game based off the famous Belgian comic book of the same name. It is an adaptation of the first five volumes of the comic series (a series with 18 volumes and a lot of plot). In line with this, the game combines cell shaded graphics and comic style effects in order to make the player feel that they are inside a comic book. While this isn't the first time such a media cross has been attempted, XIII is notable for being one of the few to attempt it in a first person shooter genre. Unfort...

Square Enix had this long standing policy about sequels and remakes... they didn't make them. This has obviously become more of a guideline these days, with several remakes having come out, and some sequels, one of which is Dirge of Cerberus.

Kingdom Hearts 2 is the third game in what is currently a trilogy (the second game being Chain of Memories for the GBA). It is perhaps one of the most bizarre concepts to hit the RPG market: Disney characters mixed with Final Fantasy characters in an action RPG. Back in 2002 the first Kingdom Hearts was released with an air of trepidation. Donald Duck mixed with Cloud Strife? Such a mix had not been attempted since the creation of brunch. It proved to be a success (the game, not brunch). Now Kin...

When I was first writing this review and looking for the proper score to this game, Gamefaqs was really helpful. Right there, under 5, it said "playable, nothing special about it." And that's exactly the feeling I was left with after playing MGS4. Now, first of all, you should know where I'm coming from as a reviewer and gamer. I love the MGS series. Or rather, I love the oddly numbered games in the series. I personally think that MGS1 and MGS3 stand among the few perfect games out there. An exc...

Early RPGs are based on very simple principals. Throw a few goblins in some square rooms that have been neatly arranged in a grid-shape, add some weapons, maybe toss in a tavern, slap any combination of “swords,” “dungeons,” “dragons,” or “darkness” onto the title, and stick some awkward looking guy wearing blatantly homoerotic armor on the cover, then sell it to the hopeless misanthropes that buy that sort of thing. This was a trend that continued until the late 80’s, at which point developer...

Every puzzle game I have ever played on the SNES has sucked. First there’s the standard billion and one mahjong clones the Japanese consume like so much Pocky. Then there’s your fifty different Tetris games, and digitized versions of the old standbys – picross, crosswords, things like that. You can look through almost every one of the 6,766 roms in the last released SNES romset, and you will not find one single puzzle game that does not totally blow. Then someone introduced me to Umihara Kawase,...

Three games in one box for a mere $29.99 (plus tax) would seem like a situation that is full of win, likely epic win, especially when those games belong to such an auspicious series as Metal Gear Solid. Having only experienced the series enough to know that there is some guy named Snake and that everyone he meets is excessively chatty, part of me has always wanted to understand why so many fans are so loyal to this one-man army. I initially thought that the spastic amounts of plot devel...

As long as there are people, there will be an endless line of medical patients in need of surgery. That's good news for Trauma Center hero, Derek Stiles, as this means plenty of new hospital adventures to be had. Even better, his latest batch of patients in Trauma Center: Under the Knife 2 make for some of the most exciting surgical operations to date.

It’s no secret to most of the world that Square-Enix is a dying company. Their stock price has fallen 20% in the past year and their CEO has issued a memo telling the developers that they will be fired if they attempt to release anything other than rehashes or new expansion packs for Final Fantasy XI. The ironic part is that up until the release of The World Ends With You earlier this year, Squaresoft had not made an original non-Final-Fantasy game since the release of Chrono Cross in 1999, and ...