Browsing the "Relationships" Category

There was a time when sleeping with my wife was fun. It was back when we weren’t married and didn’t live in the same place. Back when I could fart, snore, and throw my elbows around while sleeping without having to hear my wife complain because she was 15 miles away in her parents’ home. Although...

Don't worry, this isn't another post from a single, protesting hippie claiming that Valentine's Day is a marketing scheme. This comes from a married man with years of experience in doing the least amount possible for a woman, while still being able to sleep with her.
There’s a fine line between...

My Text To My Sick Wife
My wife was sick at home just a few weeks ago. Poor girl. I texted her:
"Get well, drink soup, and rest all day. Hopefully when I got home you will feel better!"
That's basically what you're supposed to say. That's what normal people do.
That poor girl was still...

I'm confessing to Lord Santa here on why I didn’t deserve SHIT for Christmas this year. Just like a good, bad boy should.
I Avoided 17 Weekend Walks with The Dog
Nearly every weekend, my wife loves taking these long walks with the dog. And when she invites me I try to come up with a legitimate...

Though this is meant mainly for men out there, my intention for this post is to prevent you, the potential bride or groom, from making one of the biggest mistakes of your life. But let’s be honest, you’ve already made a mistake even thinking about proposing to a person you will learn to loathe in a matter...

I got in serious trouble with my wife this week.
I posted what I thought was a funny, less-than-10-second video that was intended to satisfy the minimal attention spans of all you internet creeps. Here it was:
15-biscuit penalty. #NFL
A video posted by RelTheWriter (@relthewriter) on Oct 26, 2016...

The iPhone 77 is set release between the year 2156 and 2170. Great news, it will be free. Horrible news, there's a catch. Just like the peasants during Robin Hood: Men in Tights (1993), we may have to take Apple seriously when they say, "Lend me your ears."
According to sources* close to the Apple...

I've been trying to convince my wife that we "need," "should get," and "would benefit from" buying a 65-inch 4K TV. Of course it hasn't worked, otherwise why would I write about this?
I'll admit, we "need" it because I want it. And we "should get" it because I want to. And we "would benefit...

I’m sitting at work on a Friday at 4:50 p.m.
I’m elated as the anticipation of the weekend builds. Video games and drinks all night, while my wife watches RuPaul's Drag Race or Girls or some other stupid show on her iPad.
Heaven awaits.
Suddenly I get a text. Like a pin popping a balloon,...