Frank Mickadeit, a columnist for the OC Register, is staying in a monkey cage at the Santa Ana Zoo in California. He's been there three days, and is scheduled to come out at 4PM PDT (7PM EDT) today. Mickadeit joined the monkeys as a human exhibit. The sign attached labeled his species as Columnist horribilis. While they observed him, Mickadeit in turn observed the zoo visitors.

For seven hours, I was entertained and, I hope, moderately entertaining, as a parade of moms with strollers, grandparents with charges, art students from Santa Ana College, biology students from Fullerton College, friends, regular readers and media types wandered up.

If they had no idea a human being was on loan from the Register, the look on their faces said, "What the ..." If they did know, they wanted to know, "Why the ..."

"Three days, and you're getting paid?" one woman asked, as I regaled onlookers with a variety of tricks that included blowing smoke rings and figuring out how to extract tiny bits of papaya from a hollow ball my keeper tossed at me.

"Well, uh, yeah, I guess I am getting paid," I replied indignantly.

"Paid just to sit in a cage three days a week," she said, shaking her head.

"Oh, no!" I said, finally realizing where she was going. "I'm not here three days every week!"