“Many people are in a rut and a rut is nothing but a grave.” Have you ever heard this quote before? It came from the mouth of Vance Havner, and it sure packs a punch! Feeling unhappy is something we like to avoid, but it happens to all of us at some point. Feeling miserable and being stuck there is bound to happen as well. The very nature of life guarantees us times when we will feel this way, no matter what we do. So how do we climb out of this dark place when our turn comes? What is the quickest way to go from miserable to happy? New York Times best selling authors Esther and Jerry Hicks believe we can climb out of any situation by taking one step. In their book The Astonishing Power of Emotions, they reveal how following the right thoughts can take us to unimaginable heights. It All…

Emotions are designed by nature to be fleeting. They are meant to rise to the surface of our bodies to be felt, acknowledged, and released, once and for all. Emotion just wants to be recognized. Biologically, emotion is meant to prompt us for action, give us important information about our surroundings, motivate us and help us communicate to others. However, most of us have learned to ignore this internal guidance system and avoid ‘negative’ emotions all together. We have learned to unconsciously shut down our body’s internal processing system when we start to feel any signs of vulnerability, fear, or rejection. We stop our bodies from allowing these natural emotions to rise up and convey their message. We do this when we overuse television, social media, alcohol/drugs, or partake in any addictive behaviour. Another common way we avoid emotion is by distracting ourselves with meaningless activities. Shopping and amassing material…

Self-esteem is not a sexy topic. Not even close. Most people don’t like talking about their self-esteem. But not me—I’m deeply passionate about it. Self-esteem is defined as confidence in one’s own worth or abilities. Have you ever noticed how prevalent low self-esteem is among the highly sensitive population? I have. As young sensitive children, we felt different from everyone else. We had to change or hide who we really were in order to fit in with our families and society. Because of this, many highly sensitive people develop a belief that being themselves is not okay. I have also grown to understand there is a lot we can do to change that. Once we become comfortable in our skin, our self-esteem can soar. You see, I have experienced both sides of the spectrum. I used to have low self-esteem and all the accompanying characteristics. When I noticed that the people around…

Though nobody is immune to struggle in this world, there are certain struggles that highly sensitive people have in common. The process of evolving as a highly sensitive person tends to follow a pattern. In the beginning, we struggle to feel normal in a non-sensitive and often abrasive world. We struggle with feeling different and separate from everyone else. We paddle through these murky waters until our desire to improve our situation becomes big enough to seek help. If we are successful in this, we enter the discovery phase. This hopeful phase fills us with empowering knowledge about our traits. We are relieved to discover why we are the way we are. Once this resonates, we then move towards accepting ourselves and our highly sensitive label. Highly Sensitive “Victims” of an insensitive world. During all of these phases, there are times when we may find ourselves “victims” of an…

Recently, I was lucky enough to interview a pretty incredible person. Her name is Lisa and she is my mentor. I’m not sure if she knows I call her this, but I suspect I’m not the only one who does. I first met Lisa when I took her Reiki course approximately 8 years ago. She had a warm loving energy, the kind of energy that puts everyone at ease right away. She first reminded me of my grandmother (though Lisa is much younger) because I got the feeling that no matter what I said or did around her, she would welcome me in regardless. Much like the unconditional love that I got from my Grandmother. I did not know when I first met Lisa just how important of a role she would play in my years to come. Lisa ended up being an unbelievable support system for me during my darkest…

It feels good to know that other people are just like me. Especially when I have been going through tough times. When I discover a group of people, going through the same thing as me, I am reassured and comforted. Often these groups will have labels. A way of identifying themselves and what they are experiencing in life. I can go online and discover a labelled group for practically every emotion that I feel. Anxious and depressed, there are groups for that. Hypochondria kicking in, plenty of blogs for that. Feeling extra sensitive and introverted, there are communities for those labels too. Yoga phase has me feeling spiritual? Hop on Twitter and follow the hashtags. Upset from chronic digestive issues-just look on Facebook. Literally, there are labelled groups for everything. But when I connect with people that label themselves the same things I label myself, I feel less alone. Normal, even.…

What is it about insecurity that makes us so uncomfortable? Why do most of us pretend we don’t have insecurities, or even worse, suppress them? While it is common to deny insecurity, we must be aware of the drastic consequences of doing so. The very act of pushing something down automatically creates resistance. It takes a great amount of energy to push down our insecurities. Not just physical energy, but mental and emotional energy as well. Any person or situation has the potential to trigger these emotions and it is inevitable that they will rise to the surface. At this point, we must decide if we want to keep building upon these insecurities, or if we want to face them once and for all. Insecurity Is Hidden Opportunity Our insecurities are really just hidden opportunities. We must look at them as clues. Clues that pin point suppressed parts of ourselves…

Highly sensitive people can fall into one of two categories when balance is not present in their lives. Elaine Aron calls these categories “too out” or “too in.” Too out is when you push yourself out too much – overstimulating yourself with too much work, risk taking or exploring. Or you may keep yourself too in by overprotecting yourself when you really long to be out in the world like others. Which one are you? Take the test below to find out. (Elaine Aron’s test from “The Highly Sensitive Person,” pg.50) For each statement, put a 3 for very true, 2 for somewhat true, or 1 for hardly ever true. I often experience the brief effects of being over-aroused, overstimulated, or stressed – things like blushing, heart pounding, or my breath becoming more rapid or shallow, my stomach tensing, my hands sweating or trembling, or suddenly feeling on the verge…

Taking on other people’s emotions could be the biggest challenge facing highly sensitive people and empaths. We easily feel what other people feel, whether it is a family member we live with, the grocery store clerk, a co-worker, or a stranger. Going through our day to day life requires a certain awareness in order to distinguish between our feelings and others. This ability to recognize what we are taking on allows us to make a conscious choice about what to do next. Though we gain a lot from this unique trait, we often pay a hefty price for it. We can feel controlled by this trait and allow it to influence where we go and who we see. But there is another way to live. We can learn to thrive in the world with this special gift, we just need the right tools. 1. Get Grounded – this is the most…

It is no secret that many anxiety sufferers are highly sensitive people. Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in North America. They are highly treatable, yet only about one-third of those suffering receive treatment. I was lucky enough to sit down and chat with an incredible woman who has been studying anxiety for many years. Her name is Anita Kaiser and she has been running specialty anxiety workshops for the past 3 years. Anita suffered from anxiety in her 20’s, and understands first hand what it feels like. I wanted to know what she thought was the best relief for anxiety. Her answer – yoga. Q: What would you say is one of the biggest challenges anxiety sufferers face? A: The whole issue with anxiety is that people aren’t dealing with the present moment. Anxiety by its very nature is either being worried about the future or being worried about the past.…

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About Nicole

My name is Nicole and I am a highly sensitive person. I started The Sensitive Life because I felt a deep need to share the knowledge that I have acquired and studied over the years. This was information that I really needed as a highly sensitive person. Read More