Today is International Women’s Day. We are all familiar with the statistics, and for women in management, Catalyst provides a look: http://www.catalyst.org/knowledge/women-management. Today’s Women’s March and other actions are controversial for good reasons, as only certain women retain enough power to have the privilege to walk off their jobs. I believe that speaking up, marching, and taking a stand in public and private is important and a choice that can take many individual forms. Perhaps we can also look at our River Birch gatherings as a kind of circle of collective action where we strengthen our clarity and our responses in our own lives in service to others.

What’s on my mind today is about Speaking Up.

The 60’s/70’s women’s movement had a saying that the personal is political. I’ve been thinking about the subtle and not so subtle cultural power that keeps women from speaking up. It is a common theme in coaching women leaders: to have self-doubt and for that to impede grounded and impactful leadership. Men have self-doubt and it manifests in a different manner, but with women it often results in moving to the side-line, taking a side seat at the table or remaining quiet.

So, what is the appropriate response? How do we prepare ourselves for the long haul to respond effectively and in keeping with our values, and in a way that we can be heard (through the din)? I’ve wanted to Respond, instead of React, and take Response(able) Action. Part of that undoubtedly takes pausing and centering, listening and discerning.

About thirty of us gathered to view the film along with lively discussion. You may purchase this video from PBS (as we did), and / or view the trailer or complete version here.

“It’s sometimes surprising to discover the cumulative progress women have made in recent times. Just think, what field has not been enriched by females in art, theater, finance politics, law, entrepreneurship, science. The list is as impressive as it is enlightening. To realize that we’re no longer pioneers, the startling exception, the first to fly, or swim or sail prodigious distances in bad weather. No longer the first to untangle problems in science, math or physics.

No. We are multitudes, and society is clearly the better for our peaceful invasion. There is no modernity and no justice without the talent, the passion and the steely intelligence of women.”

Toni Morrison

Our discussion covered many elements inspired by the film, including a discussion of what it means to be a feminist. What does this really mean for those who came before us as well as those who are young today, and for men, as well as women, male youth as well as female? Our discussion was about knowing one’s own power, own voice, in service to what matters, and in service to humanity.

There also was lively discussion on the topic of Self-Doubt and Confidence. See this brief and fun TED Lesson: Tips to Boost Confidence!

The RiverBirch Project focuses on Women, Leadership, & Life! On the topic of Women, Work, and Family, two important events are upcoming:

Having It All, a locally produced documentary, premiered in July, sponsored by KCTS and ParentMap, and then KCTS aired the film in August. If you missed it, there’s another chance to see it on September 24th.To see the trailer, and for more information about this honest and timely film, check here.

Anne Marie Slaughter is coming to Town Hall, October 5, 2015, on the topic: Women, Men, Work and Family. Her 2012 cover article in the Atlantic “Why Women Still Can’t Have it All” re-ignited the current U.S. conversation and most recent ‘new women’s movement’ and prompted the start of our own dialogue and The RiverBirch Project. Ms. Slaughter is speaking on topics from her new book, Unfinished Business. Tickets and more information available at Town Hall.

RiverBirch Project Update:

We’ve taken an 18-month pause with The RiverBirch Project, and many things have ensued since our last event…The reasons for pausing can be summed up by:

My Coaching practice is thriving and has required even more time and attention. All the while, I’ve scanned and connected with others who are convening conversations on similar topics, to be able to bring these back when the time was right.

There’s also been a tidal wave of new offerings in print, social media, and events, on the topic of women, leadership, and navigating professional / personal lives. Truthfully, I paused to ponder: What’s ours to do in this space where there is now so much available?

In the social and print media, however, most of the conversation is along the lines of advice. Still, I believe there’s a space for convening a conversation without advice, but with dialogue, convening conversations for learning and awareness, and support…the original purpose for The RiverBirch Project. We will resume in October with a new RiverBirch event, and will subsequently offer these gatherings as there’s time and interest. Watch this site for future posts and the event announcement.

Check Out a new Play

When Catherine, a 40-something, single, and highly successful academic returns to her hometown to take care of her ailing mother, she reconnects with her college roommate and best friend, Gwen, now a stay-at-home mother and housewife married to Catherine’s old flame. Both women, coveting each other’s choices, attempt to find the happiness and fulfillment they lack by travelling a very bumpy road not taken, with surprising and hilarious results. This fast-paced, witty comedy by Gina Gionfriddo explores the continuing fallout and evolution of the feminist movement. –

Women Leaders, Breaking Barriers:

In more news: Helen Thomas ” who’s bottomless curiosity and unquenchable drive made her a prominent White House reporter at a time when men dominated the profession”, has died, at 92. She was among women in the newsroom who started as a clerk and transcended that role when most women were expected to stay in the background.

Helen left public service (good journalism is a public service), and retired from her work, when she reflected her bias. It was unworthy of her, and was kind of nasty. In fact, I want to remember her, without knowing this. But isn’t that the way it is with all of us? Good people, good leaders, all of us, have bias of some kind or another. We must spend a lifetime uncovering this, and in self-reflection and honesty we need to choose to reveal it to ourselves and learn. President Obama noted this in his comments this past week following the most recent flashpoint in our national non-conversation on Race: ” President Obama Asks Americans to do some soul-searching”.

In thinking about Helen: she didn’t try to be a ‘lady’, and often her questions at White House press conferences were more pointed than people were comfortable with. As women, we move through life in a way that allows us to gain more honesty in expression. Many writers and researchers, Dr. Christine Northrup among them, say that during menopause, hormonal and biological changes influence women to loose some of the over-active filtering in the brain that brings out a new ‘calling it like it is’, a new honesty.

Corporations and Empathy:

Studies say that empathic behavior of sisters may rub off on their brothers. The presence of women influences empathic action. A recent opinion piece in the NYT suggests another reason why it may be important for more women to be in executive and board roles relates to corporate behavior with employees and the community.

“We recognize the direct advantages that women as leaders bring to the table, which often include diverse perspectives, collaborative styles, dedication to mentoring and keen understanding of female employees and customers. But we’ve largely overlooked the beneficial effects that women have on the men around them. Is it possible that when women join top management teams, they encourage male colleagues to treat employees more generously and to share knowledge more freely? Increases in motivation, cooperation, and innovation in companies may be fueled not only by the direct actions of female leaders, but also by their influence on male leaders.” Adam Grant, NYT, July 21, 2013

The RiverBirch Project: Women, Leadership & Life! Upcoming Events:

An evening event will be offered in the Fall. Topics in the works: Executive Presence — Exactly What is This?, and: Mentors and Sponsors–What’s the Difference, and Why Does It Matter?

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