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Monday, April 30, 2012

Staying The Course

it is nearly 5:00 p.m. in the holy city of zefat. we are continuing to have a desert heatwave. it looks like rain, but we just might be in for a sand storm. i am thinking about going to the local supermarket. they had nice chair cushions on sale last week.

things here are beginning to settle down. i actually, ran into my son, coming home from shul on friday night. i was alone for shabbat, once again. i didn't feel like joining my sister and family for the evening meal. they begin and end the dinner, quite late. i like to go to sleep early on friday night. i had tons of fish and chicken wings, left over from my get together on thursday afternoon. i even had some corn left.

i went over to see the family on friday afternoon. my sister had asked me for a certain remedy. my nieces were busy making and shaping challah and rolls. by the time i left, the rolls were ready. my niece insisted on my taking some home. i usually do not eat a lot of challah. i have to admit that the whole wheat onion rolls were sensational. i can't remember enjoying bread so much.

i had a strong urge to go to shul for evening services. i hadn't gone out on a friday night in years. i didn't want to go to the sephardi shul for fear of running into my daughter in law. i wasn't really sure if they were in the neighborhood or not for shabbat, but i didn't want to take any chances. i went to the chabad minyan, down the street in the local bomb shelter. i was hoping to run into an american lady who recently made aliya. she lives on the next block. she wasn't in shul. the service was, none the less, very lovely. there were not a lot of male congregants. there was only one other lady in the womans' section. still, i was inspired.

as i passed the sephardi shul on my way home, i stood on the corner to see if my son was there. after it was mostly, empty, i saw my son. he was alone. he saw me and crossed over to say hello. he immediately told me, that everything was going to be okay. i told him that it was great to see him and that he looked well. he also told me that i looked well, too. he was on his way home. the kids were eating at home this shabbat. i wished him a good shabbat and went home. i was high as a kite.

the next morning he came over at 8:00 a.m. with my grandson. i think the ruse was that he needed a thermos of hot water. my grandson was ecstatic to see me and to be in my house again. he hadn't been here in about 2 months. he nearly flipped out when he saw the living room, his old stomping ground. cloey the dog was very excited to see him, too. i gave my grandson a package of magnetic blocks and 2 wooden puzzles. i bought them before pesach, just in case i had a visiter. i walked them home. my grandson was perched in my arms. he was holding onto my body for dear life. i pretended that i didn't know where they lived. i wished them both a good shabbat. my son hugged me and gave me a kiss. he hadn't hugged me in over 3 years.

i was so happy. i went to shul at 9:00 a.m. i hadn't been there for shabbat services in many, many years. the service was beautiful. i couldn't stop crying. the american lady came just then. afterwards, she and her husband invited me to join them for lunch. i was so hoping that they would. i couldn't stand the thought of being alone for one more meal. we hit it off immediately. i stayed til almost 4:00 p.m. we then met up an hour later, and she accompanied me to an english torah class in canaan. she got to meet many english apeakers. it was her first time, since coming to zefat a few months ago, to go a class. we took a cab home after shabbat.

it was the best shabbat that i've had in a very long time. everyone at the class was complementing my short wig. that's right, at the last moment, i put on my wig. i hadn't worn it in years. i also got compliments on my clothes, the colors, my skin and general looks. i felt like a people magnet. it really works to appear well. to seem well, to seem fit and happy. i finally inderstand. nobody likes to be with a whiney loser. nobody likes desperate. nobody likes toothless. everybody likes a winner. to quote the infamous charlie sheen: "winning!"

i might have some part time tenants later this month. i know that i gave them too good of a deal, but i am desperate for income. i am trying as hard as i can to pay off my bills. i even, have a dog sitting job soon. but i think that i will blow it off. i don't want to have excessive barking when the tenants arrive. it isn't nice.i am just going to stay on my new course. eat well, look well, act well. be well.