Ok, Not Fucking Fair

Dammit now I have to return to school. A whole 20 minutes after I graduate my alma mater decides to get cool and invite KAL PENN to TEACH AT PENN!! When I was deep in the throes of my brown boy fetish and trying to elbow my way into their culture as that girl, wasn’t nobody like, you know who would totally kick ass as a guest lecturer? Kal Fucking Penn.

Just because you have the same name as the school doesn’t mean you’re even vaguely qualified to learn the chillun some grown folk knowledge there. Do we want Charlie Brown lecturing on the psychoanalytic origins of depression at Brown? Do we want Howard Stern hosting step shows at Howard University? Do we want my black ass to serve as chancellor of Fab Bitch Tech? Okay, clearly we want the latter but damn…what the eff. I hurt.

In case you’re wondering, is that that stoner Injun from Harold and Kumar? YES THAT’S EXACTLY WHO IT IS!