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Celebrity Apprentice

I called it — I knew Clay Aiken was not going to be let go from Celebrity Apprentice, simply because the camera tricks were entirely too obvious. Reality television programs love to mess with our minds and this was no exception. Last week, it was clear that Marlee Matlin and John Rich were not fans of Aubrey O’Day, and I had a feeling she would be fired.

Donald Trump fired Aubrey by saying she was “transparent.” Which is true, and Aubrey responded by saying she wasn’t. Aubrey is transparent, and extremely smart, but overplayed her hand by constantly taking credit for everything and talking shit about her colleagues. The only person Aubrey didn’t insult on camera was Lisa Lampanelli (too scared she would end up in Lisa’s act?); even her so-called friend Teresa Giudice was given the talking head snark treatment.

Teresa Giudice may have been fired on last Sunday’s Celebrity Apprentice, but the reality star will be back she assures us. Teresa will be returning to help the final three with their finale challenges.

Teresa confirmed the news in her most recent Bravo Blog, but RadarOnline is also confirming that the reality mogul will be returning to the show. And apparently the Trumps continue to be impressed with Teresa’s business sense, despite the public debacles in her personal life.

“People underestimated Teresa, she is a lot smarter than people realize and she has always used that to her advantage,” Teresa an insider shares. “Teresa has a college degree and was a successful business woman before joining Housewives, she knows exactly what she is doing.”

“There is a reason why Teresa is the only Housewife on the New Jersey franchise with a brand that spans multiple product categories and there is a reason Mr. Trump selected her for Celebrity Apprentice, she is very smart,” the source adds.

Teresa, herself, calls the show a “great experience” – unlike that other reality show she’s on! “Mr. Trump has really helped me take my business to the next level,” she adds. And Teresa insists she gets along well with all her castmates. Unlike that other reality show she’s on. “We really didn’t take anything personally. Debbie [Gibson] and I keep in touch and we are doing great,” Teresa shares. “Lisa[Lampanelli] and I have also forged a friendship, we all became very close on this show.”

On last night’s Celebrity Apprentice, we lost two of the biggest reasons to watch the show. I’ll spare you the spoiler alert, and I’ll just start from the ending: Teresa Giudice finally floated her way out of the boardroom, and Lisa Lampanelli found herself in a situation she couldn’t cry her way out of. In fact, it was her constant crying that cost her a spot in the final two. Lisa has bragged on her Twitter that she uses crying to manipulate the judges, so I stopped buying the “passionate comic act” around the second time she did it.

Last night’s task was to create an ad campaign for CHI hair products for Elle magazine. Anyone else get the feeling they create tasks that are perfect for the just eliminated contestant? Dayana Mendoza could have possibly done really well on this task with her modeling background and connections. I guess we’ll never know. She could have created an ad campaign with a woman getting her hair done coming out of labor; the labor thing being one of her more outlandish ideas. Teresa and Lisa decide to project manage.

Last night, Donald Trumptold the remaining six victims on Celebrity Apprenticethat they all looked sick and tired. And, he’s right. I’m sick and tired, too. The marathon pace of the show is starting to visibly take its toll on the contestants. Or maybe the editing monkeys exaggerated everyone’s behavior. Whatever it was, after tonight’s elimination, there will only be one way to go, and that’s for everyone to turn on each other.

The challenge this week was to create a jingle for Good Sam, an emergency roadside assistance firm with a retro-esque mascot. What a shame that both our musically inclined “celebrities” were project managers last week. This week, Aubrey O’Day and Clay Aiken really could have shone, but instead Dayana Mendoza decided to PM, with Arsenio Hall managing Unanimous. Or, the reality, Aubrey took over the creative direction of the team while Arsenio’s true project management task was managing Aubrey.

Speaking to HollywoodLife, the self-titled Queen of Mean hints that tonight’s episode is quite explosive, as she comes to verbal blows with her teammate! “Let’s just say me and Clay Aikenexplode at Dayana [Mendoza] so loudly, we renamed our team Team Chernobyl,” Lisa hints. “We have the biggest eruption.”

“I feel like I’m finally vindicated,” Lisa continues. “A man, or as close to a man as Clay can be considered, is going to be backing me up and saying, ‘Wow, Lisa was right all along.’ I saw him yelling at her in the preview, and I was like, ‘You go, Blanche from The Golden Girls!’” Um… why is Lisa so impressed with her cruelty towards people. She does realize she’s embarrassing herself on national TV?

Last night’s Celebrity Apprentice felt like a placeholder in between far more exciting episodes. The last two weeks were so exciting that I guess we needed a break before the real stuff starts. This needs to step up, because Sunday nights are too competitive. In any case, the Trumps certainly needed another product placement turn, since Ivanka’s fashion line has been all but forgotten at this point by most viewers.

This time, it was the Donald’s turn, and he got to shill for his new fragrance, “Success by Trump” Or as I like to call it, “Success after declaring bankruptcy and putting your family’s name on just about anything.” Both teams had to create an in-store display and slogan to promote the brand at Macy’s. On team Unanimous, looking so sad with just three members, Aubrey O’Day stepped up to the PM plate, and on team Forte, Clay Aiken took over. Penn Jillette talking-heads that he is going to bow out in order to become the celebrity apprentice. Remember that part!

The assignment is given out in Trump’s magnificently tacky home, the amount of gold just in the room the cast is standing in could probably be used to feed several third-world nations, but who cares when Donald needs everything to sparkle? Moving on to the war room, Clay already started to get annoyed at Penn and all his IDEAS. Dayana Mendoza immediately comes up with a super sexual idea of having nude women wear ties in the photos for the display. I’m not surprised that Dayana comes up with stuff like this; if you ever watch television from her home country of Venezuela, everything is all about innuendo and double entendre. The girl simply can not help it!

At an event held yesterday at Trump Tower, Teresa presented the check to nine-year-old kidney disease patient Matthew Levine, whose dad serves on the board of directors of The NephCure Foundation.

Teresa shared in the press release: “No one — especially a child — should have to deal with FSGS or Nephrotic Syndrome. I have met a number of kidney disease patients since I joined up with NephCure. Many of them you wouldn’t even know are sick. They look healthy from the outside, but these diseases are tearing apart their kidneys. Anyone who has FSGS or Nephrotic Syndrome should contact NephCure; they are making a difference.”

“I am so grateful that I can use my platform to help. Life is too short for drama and negativity and my work with NephCure reminds me every day to focus on what really matters in life. Please make a difference and join me in supporting NephCure.”

On hand to show Teresa some support was her husbandJoe Giudice and also Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr. This is reportedly the only time the Trump family showed up for any of the charity check ceremonies.