Disappointments and difficulties may knock you down but don’t let it knock you out.

Every person has had or will have difficulties in his or her life. Some are more serious than others, but trouble comes to everyone eventually. People misjudge situations and other people. A person can become angry, sad or feel betrayed. Some go into denial but not dealing with a problem or issue results in the situation worsening.

Repressing your feelings is a recipe for disaster. Ignoring things or holding them in only makes you feel worse. It often magnifies the issue so that it can no longer be dealt with reasonably. Feeling sorry for yourself is a common response. Getting angry is just short of a dangerous situation where often you take it out on innocent bystanders or someone else who doesn’t deserve it. This behavior makes things worse.

Becky Vaughn-Furlow(Photo: Special to The Clarion-Ledger)

Learning to deal with disappointments and/or difficulties is a much needed skill for leaders. On the job some of the major disappointments that occur are:

You were promised a job, but it was given to someone else.

A high-performing employee quits unexpectedly.

Your boss won’t approve a business trip, seminar or other opportunity.

Someone owes you money and won’t pay you back.

You get terminated from your job.

You have worked hard and earned a promotion but your boss doesn’t give it to you.

Your annual bonus is reduced even though you met all your goals.

Many, many other things don’t go as planned or expected.

There are ways to deal with these disappointments and difficulties. Here are some tips:

Stay calm.

Avoid becoming angry.

Change your strategy.

Seek advice from a trusted friend or mentor.

Evaluate what went wrong.

Talk to and listen to all parties involved.

Re-evaluate expectations.

Don’t procrastinate in dealing with the problem.

Learn from any mistakes made.

Don’t let it control you and make you ineffective.

Be willing to compromise or make changes to solve the problem.

Move forward and don’t constantly relive the issue.

Whether you are an executive, manager, first line supervisor or entrepreneur it is important to learn how to handle these unplanned situations. You can bounce back regardless of what may have occurred.

These tips are also applicable for disappointments and difficulties in your personal life. Health issues can occur in the process if not resolved. Failures can dash hopes and dreams. You may need to move forward by modifying expectations and looking at things more clearly and rationally. This will help you to meet your objectives.

Learning from these experiences can prepare you better to help others going through difficulties, and you will be blessed for your involvement. Recognize that disappointments and difficulties are inevitable in your personal and work life. It is up to you as to how you react to them. Don’t let them prevent you from reaching your goals, plans for the future and your dreams. Keep looking up.