Here’s the thing:I need a dress. I can’t afford to buy one and I would rather have the honor of wearing one passed down in the family anyway. I had brought up to my mother that I would be honored to wear her dress and she didn’t say anything, nor did she even acknowledge that I was talking to her. She’s against the wedding and as a result, being incredibly unsupportive. I’m trying to keep her involved because one day I think she’ll regret it if she isn’t. A few days later, my Future Mother-In-Law offered, completely out-of-the-blue, for me to wear her dress. She’s been more than supportive and I would rather wear her dress since I know that’s what she actually wants.My question is, is it selfish or rude to wear her dress over my mothers?*Note: I am nearly estranged from my immediate family and we have not been on good terms.

Here’s the thing:I need a dress. I can’t afford to buy one and I would rather have the honor of wearing one passed down in the family anyway. I had brought up to my mother that I would be honored to wear her dress and she didn’t say anything, nor did she even acknowledge that I was talking to her. She’s against the wedding and as a result, being incredibly unsupportive. I’m trying to keep her involved because one day I think she’ll regret it if she isn’t. A few days later, my Future Mother-In-Law offered, completely out-of-the-blue, for me to wear her dress. She’s been more than supportive and I would rather wear her dress since I know that’s what she actually wants.My question is, is it selfish or rude to wear her dress over my mothers?*Note: I am nearly estranged from my immediate family and we have not been on good terms.

@HappieHallie: Um, if your mother is against the wedding and you are estranged from immediate family, then why would you push her to allow you to wear her dress? I understand the desire to have her involved and the desire to stave of her future regret, but there are more productive ways of doing that than wearing her dress. I’d go with FMIL’s dress, since she offered it, under the condition that you are allowed to alter and tailor it as needed. There are also a slew of used dress sites out there–google ’em!

Go for FMILs dress. You’re estranged from your mother and she’s not supportive of your wedding, wear your FMILs who is supportive and who obviously adores you if she stated that you could wear her dress out-of-the-blue.

The only concern I would have, is if FMILs dress was something you didn’t like then I would consider talking to your mom or going for a cheap dress.

how gracious of your fmil to offer her dress. this means a lot. have you seen her dress? do you like it? i wouldn’t say no to her quite yet. it doesn’t sound like your mother really cares so it’s not going to be too meaningful if you wear her dress over your fmil’s.

try on your fmil’s dress. she is happy and supportive of you and your wedding.

That is fantastic that your Future Mother-In-Law is offering you her dress! What a warm welcome into your new family. It is great when a bride can get along with her Mother-In-Law. Any way you can strengthen that bond is worth it—-especially if your own bond with your mother is not as strong.