This blog post came about organically, and is the culmination of something like 16 years of work, if you can believe that.

When I was 14, I was given an assignment in school to simply write down my own Ten Commandments—rules about things I thought were important to me personally, and that I would abide by.

I wrote them down and handed them in, but also added them to my journal at the time.

A few of the rules from the original list will appear below, although some have been either changes or omitted – the ones about asking for things, or sleep, and the like are from this list.

Just about decade later, I added a few rules to it, as part of a joke email chain that was being passed around among my friends. Most of the rules pertaining to sex or fashion came about in this addition, and a few of the fitness ones.

Finally, I have made some additions over the past month or so. Here’s how this came to be. I had actually quite forgotten about this list, not having looked at it since I was about 24, but was brought to mind by a book.

Recently, I read The Guinea Pig Diaries by AJ Jacobs, which is essentially a collection of articles chronicling Jacobs’ various lifestyle experiments. These include everything from living a month as a beautiful woman (by controlling his babysitter’s online dating profile) to experimenting with radical honestly. All of the experiments are extremely interesting, but the one about George Washington is most germane to our conversation, and is in fact the inspiration for this post.

Chapter Seven of The Guinea Pig Diaries is called “What Would George Washington Do?” The premise of the experiment was to behave like GW for a month, in every way possible.

You might be wondering, how does one behave like George Washington? Or, more specifically, how does one know how George Washington might behave? Very good questions, with a single specific answer: you just follow the list.

Washington, you see, had a list of 110 rules that governed his behavior, called “Rules of Civility and Decent Behaviour in Company and Conversation.” Washington was not the original author of the rules—they were penned by French Jesuits sometime around 1595—but he did take the time to painstakingly copy the entire list by hand, and followed them as closely as possible for most of his life. (If you’re interested, you can read the entire list here.)

Jacobs’ experiment, then, was to follow these rules as closely as possible, and in essence, do what George would do, and react as George would react.

Upon reading all of these, I decided to pull out my own list of rules, add to it, and see where it went. I have been exceptionally pleased with the results.

I want to share that list with you, and a bit of why I think it has value.

But first…

About My Rules for Success (Mild Disclaimer)

Before anything else, I should just point out that in order to make the list feel more real, I have fleshed out a good portion of the rules to give them context and clarify my meaning.

As I mentioned above, some items on the list are quite old, and were added when I was a teenager; they’re a bit obvious and perhaps bland. Other were added when I was in the prime of youthful debauchery; these rules are based on the experiences and worldview of a 24-year old, and so they are a bit over-the-top.

I left in certain rules from both periods that I think I still believe in. In other words, although many of them do not apply to my life now, it’s simply a case of having an entirely different lifestyle, rather than being an entirely different person. For example, Rule 23 has not been applicable to me for quite some time, but in the event it was, I believe I might follow it.

The more recent additions show a lot of the change in what I think about in the day to day. These are the ones about networking, or adding value, and of course quite a few about fitness. Moreover, I think that the biggest difference in the “tone” of the advice or the place it comes from is the direction of application.

What I mean is that a lot of older items are things I applied to myself instinctively, the newer ones come from lessons I’ve learned, both as a person and a coach.

These newer rules, I think, are the ones where I felt were “giving advice” or perhaps writing a rule for other people to follow; the general rules I wish someone had told me when I was 18 that would have saved me a bit of time and a lot of pain. (Although that might have precluded the inclusion of others, which came about as the result of bitter lessons.)

This list gives some insight into who I am and a few of the things that are important to me; however, please consider that I take very few things seriously, so some of the items are largely on there for laughs, and while the fitness stuff is relevant, I don’t know that I could say it’s important in my worldview of personal behavior—it’s just damn good advice.

While I think a huge number of the items here are universally true, I don’t think that this could be ported to another person and be completely applicable. In other words, I’m not making broad suggestions for how everyone should live their respective lives.

These are my rules, for my life; and so I ask you to keep in mind, as you read this, that this list is a set of principles by which I govern my behavior, or try to—and that I am exceedingly and eternally aware of how very imperfect I am.

I know that one or two items might, to some, seem either weird or stupid or vain or petty; that’s fine, because I have at times in my life been all of those things— just hopefully, not all at once.

Now that we’ve got that cleared up, let’s get into the list.

Roman’s Rules for Success, Happiness, and an Awesome Life

Never get more than 9 hours of sleep, or less than 3. I believe in adequate rest, but too much sleep wasting time that could be spent on anything from self-edification to world domination.

It’s better to beg forgiveness than ask permission.

Stretch your hip flexors. They hate you, and are staging a rebellion against your posture; the only way to quell the uprising is with daily stretches.

Write it down. Your memory is shit.

Get your clothes tailored. A 200-dollar suit that fits well looks better than a 500-dollar suit that doesn’t.

Show love. Never, ever, ever hold back from giving a compliment, as long as it’s sincere. There’s never a bad time to say something nice; get in the habit of doing this. People will love you for it.

Give credit. Don’t steal other people’s shit. If you got an idea from someone else, drop their name and throw them a link. Do this even if it’s not proprietary. Especially in the fitness industry.

On cologne: less is more, if you buy the good stuff. Have a scent for day and night.
[[Roman’s Note: This rule was added when I was 24, and also included “have a scent for each girl you’re dating.” I have no idea what my logic was, but the entire thing was probably as stupid as it sounds. I felt the need to edit this rule because while I still think it’s important to have a few scents, I don’t think one for each person you’re dating is necessary. In any event, now that I’m a one-woman man, I rotate my scents only seasonally, so as not to confuse her.]]

Nobody gives a shit about your SAT score. Or, really, any other accomplishment older than two years. If you feel the need to work this into conversation, you need to become more interesting. (See Rule 34.)

If a girl hasn’t seen Star Wars, don’t bother dating her.

You’re allowed to say no to shit you don’t like. I don’t generally believe in the idea of “obligation.” While there are things you “probably should” do, there is almost nothing you “need” to do. If I don’t like something, I will very rarely agree to do it. I have said “no” to everything you can imagine.For example, I no longer attend holidays with my extended family; I just don’t enjoy it (too much fighting), so I don’t go. Does my family complain? Sure. Do they try to make me feel guilty? Absolutely. Do I cave in? Fuck no.If you don’t like something, take a careful assessment of what going will cost you, and what it can do for you. If there’s no amount of “goodwill” that will make it seem like a good balance, don’t do it.

Do something you hate. Do it every day for 30 days. Then never do it again.

“Don’t criticize an idea unless you’re willing to provide an alternative.” – Momma Roman. If you don’t have a better suggestion, shut the fuck up. [[Roman’s Note: I find this is especially useful for trying to pick a restaurant.]]

Don’t date a woman with another man’s name tattooed on her body. The presence of such a thing implies one of two issues: unfinished business, or a tendency to make irrational decisions. Neither of these is worth dealing with.

Never play cards with a guy who has a city in is nickname. Miami John, the Cincinnati Kid, Texas Dolly—all dudes better to avoid.

Don’t judge what people do in the bedroom. As long as it’s consensual and not with underage kids, make the effort to simply not care where they put their junk, including with what type of people, or how many people, or in what way they do it. Chances are, their porn browsing history is no more fucked up than yours.

Try not to have enemies. But if someone insists on making themselves one, eat their fucking heart.

Sun’s out, guns out.

Use semi-colons; however, use them correctly. Personally, I view the semi-colon to be an indicator of good writing; while this is a gross overstatement strongly influenced by personal bias, I stand by it.

THIS:

At least once in your life, get absolutely shredded.

Buy the jeans that make your ass look the nicest. This is the only rule that applies for jeans. End of story. Thankfully, it’s not always the expensive ones; Levi’s fit me like a (very tight) glove.

If a girl cheats on you, fuck her sister. Or her best friend. Or her worst enemy. Or all three. Ladies, same applies to you.[[Roman’s Note: Yeah, I’ve done this, and no, I don’t really care how terrible or shallow it makes me seem, because I certainly think it evened us right up.]]

The high five is somewhat outdated. However, we’ll have to continue to use it until a suitable replacement is found.

Train your forearms.

Never tell someone you “don’t own a TV.” That kind of condescending, elitist bullshit makes you look like an asshole. You don’t have to own a TV, or watch it—just don’t say that. Also, be aware what’s on it; having a general understanding of pop-culture is fairly necessary for successful conversation, unless you’re speaking exclusively to other condescending, elitist assholes.

Always be the first to reach for the check. Do this even if the other person invited you out. If they put up a strong fight, let’em have it.

Finding a sports team to hate is as important as finding one to love. And probably more satisfying.

Network Like a FIEND. Tim likes to say, “Your network is your net-worth.” While he’s not wrong, I prefer to say that your network is more like a Dungeons & Dragons adventuring party. In D&D, a balanced party will have characters that can deal with everything from magic to picking locks. In life, you can’t be good at everything—but you can find people who are good at what you’re not. Develop your network so that you can always reach out to experts when you need help—and more importantly, can leverage that network to help others.

Ice cream is the perfect second date food.

A man can never have too many leather jackets. Some make you look dashing, some make you look dangerous. The right leather jacket adds a masculine edge to any outfit, and can be appropriate for most situations.

Try everything.Try every training program and every diet. But when you try them, go full out and commit for the appropriate length; program hopping isn’t a good idea. A complete lack of direction is almost as bad as dogma.I covered this in this video for SuperTraining.TV.

Answer all insults with a smile. Not everyone is going to like you, and some people will be vocal about it. There’s no point giving them the satisfaction of giving a shit.

If someone doesn’t like dogs for a reason other than fear or allergies, I’m simply not interested.

Read as many books as you can. Reading often makes you more interesting, more intelligent, and though I can’t prove this, I suspect a more useful human being. It also makes you a better writer.

There are many things that cannot be taught, but nothing that can’t be learned. I generally advise seeking out experts for coaching; however, there are things that you simply need to learn from experience.

Deadlift.

“Wasting” food is not a sin. You don’t need to clean your plate. Eating past the point of being full isn’t going to make starving kids in third world countries any less hungry. If you want to help, make a donation.

Along the same lines, buy your cheat day foods on your cheat day. Throw out whatever you have left over. No need to court disaster.

It’s not the years in your life; it’s the life in your years. Don’t listen to arguments on lifestyle based on longevity. For me, living a life fully of quality years is by far more important than making sure I have a higher total quantity of them. I quantify that quality by feelings of enjoying my food, loving the way I look, and achieving my goals.Perhaps I should have been a rock star instead of a fitness professional, but to be honest, I really don’t give a shit if your method adds 10 years to my life if it makes me small, fat, and weak. I don’t want to live ONE DAY in that condition, let alone an “extra” decade.I’ll continue to keep my weights heavy, my steaks rare, and even enjoy the occasional night out. To quote Neil Young, “it’s better to burn out than fade away.”

Admit your mistakes with honesty and humor. I find that “oh, fuckballs,I’m the worst” is a pretty good entry point for most things.

Develop a signature toast. I’m experimenting with mine. In the meantime, whenever my friends and I raise our glasses, I intone, “Ours is the Fury.” These are the words of House Baratheon, which I am using as a placeholder until I develop my own.

Don’t trust spell check. I’ve learned this the hard way.

Scared Money Don’t Make Money. This is an old saying that is common in the poker world, which is another way of saying “fortune favors the bold.” In that context, if you aren’t willing to put your money in on a coin flip gamble from time to time, you’re not going to book a big win.In the context of both life and business, I mean that if you’re never willing to take a risk, you have almost no shot of building anything worth mentioning. There are no statues built to those who lived lives of mediocrity, and on the tomb of NO heroes will you find the words, “he played it safe.”

As it turns out, women are right: wearing nice underwear does make you feel better. Here are mine:

Technically, this is a progress pic for my legs. But still. Those are some sweet panties.

Learn how to cook. If you’re approaching 30 and you can’t make a few meals, take the next month and learn. Seriously, time to grow the fuck up it. You should be able to feed yourself. It’s a basic human function. Here’s a cookbook to get you started.[[Roman’s Note: I don’t make this recommendation blindly. You can check out my foray into cooking here.]]

Tip generously outrageously. Not because you have a lot of money, or because of the 1% chance a waitress might give you her number; but because at some point this week, some jerk stiffed her, and it ruined her week. You just fixed it. Karma will be kind.

Floss your teeth for better fitness. I feel that you need to have the basics down before you start in adding things intended for ‘advanced’ reasons. I have friends who don’t floss but go out of their way to use whitening strips or see a dentist for teeth bleaching. This is stupid, to me—if you just took care of your teeth on a daily basis, you’d have to worry a bit less.In the fitness context, people ignore basic nutritional needs, but try crash diets or supplements; they can’t take the time to foam roll, but want the hottest training strategy.If you can’t make a habit of flossing your teeth, you shouldn’t bother with supplements—likely, you don’t have the basics figured out.

Everything in moderation…especially moderation.

Resolve conflicts quickly, privately, and without anger. Throwing a tantrum never did anything for anyone; getting angry and sputtering hurts your cause, anyway. As for privately—in the world of the interwebz, better to resolve things with one person than start slinging mud.

Get really, really good at making introductions. When you introduce two people, use first and last names; then take moment to explain how you know each, and end by giving each a compliment. If it’s a business introduction, make a suggestion on how you think they might help one another. In-person and email intros are important.

Once in your life—and exactly, only once—ball the fuck out. Get bottle service in a club in the Meat Packing District, or a cabana in Vegas. Realize how stupid it was, and don’t do it again. Read about my experience here.

Take the lead. Always suggest days and times to meet, instead of leaving it in the air.

“If you’re gonna write a book, write a fuckin’ book.” – Tim Ferriss. Anything worth doing is worth doing right; go after it and do the absolute best job you can.

When explaining your dietary habits, keep it simple. If you find yourself at a party and you’re 15 minutes into describing the difference between Paleo and Slow Carb, take a breath and stop talking. No one really cares about your endeavor to reset your insulin sensitivity.

Don’t be that guy.

There is no such thing a multi-purpose sock. Athletic socks should be worn with sneakers, and no other shoe. Ever. Dress socks when training is equally unreasonable.

Learn to ask for the things you want. People aren’t mind readers. Whether in a relationship or in business, you are responsible for your success and happiness. No one is going to magically figure out what you want. Ask for it and make a strong case—you’ll be absolutely floored by the response.

Try not to roll your eyes. Hey, I said TRY. Don’t judge me.

Don’t own a lot of things. Except books.

Steak should be served medium rare at most. If you eat a steak medium well, you are not good at eating steak. Check here a blog on why rare steak isn’t bad for you.

Use your sex drive as a general measure of health, as it indicates hormonal balance. Low sex drive is a symptom of everything from depression to low testosterone to over-training. Basically, if you don’t want to get freaky, something is probably wrong.

Don’t kiss on the first date.

End every single conversation by asking, “So, tell me: how can I help you?” Be sincere and mean this. Help however you can. This is the most important rule of all.

Next Steps (Your Turn)

Obviously, I’m going to suggest that you make your own list of rules for success—and you’re likely to simply ignore that suggestion and just treat this piece of writing as a funny blog post. But, I would like you to really do it. Here’s why I think this has value….

Firstly, sitting and taking the time to actually write out what is important to you, and how you think you should behave reveals a few things. The most obvious of these is that you actually have to decide what to include; on other words, really think about your values. I find that just doing that makes you a bit more mindful.

Take a moment and think about the rules you actually follow in your day-to-day life; then think about all the rules you’d like to follow. You might be surprised at the difference in these two lists. Put another way, you might be surprised at the number of rules you’d “like to” live by that you’re breaking every day.

Secondly, writing anything down makes it real—it creates tangibility. I firmly believe that by writing down a list of behaviors you’d like to adopt, or rules you’d like to abide by, you are much more likely to do just that. It creates a concrete system of assessment; a definite lens through which you can filter your view of a situation. Where once there was only an idea, now there is a guiding thought process and a behavior.

Having such a list will make you much more likely to follow the things on it. I know this, because it’s been working for me. In addition to typing it all out as above, I hand wrote all of my rules in my journal (not the descriptions, just the rules).

In the time since did this, I have become exceptionally more aware of them every day, and it’s definitely affecting my behavior. I find myself giving compliments more freely, stretching my hip flexors daily, being more cognizant of my sleep schedule, and even wearing my sexy underwear more often.

Put simply, the result is living life in accordance with the things I think are important—and, by default, I’m living a better life for me.

And I think that’s worth writing a list.

-Roman

Feeling bold? I’d love to hear one or two of YOUR rules for success; and, of course, I’d be curious for your thoughts on mine!

Let’s get 60 COMMENTS on this, and I’ll be hooking you up with an interview with Tucker Max! (imagine what HIS rules look like!?)

About the Author

John Romaniello is a level 70 orc wizard who spends his days lifting heavy shit and his nights fighting crime. When not doing that, he serves as the Chief Bro King of the Roman Empire and Executive Editor here on RFS. You can read his articles here, and rants on Facebook.

Comments for This Entry

RJ Kayser

I love this article and come back to read it at least once a year. It has helped me curating my own list of principles and I even referenced this post in a recent article of my own about the "virtual mentors" that inspire me.

[…] I’m of the mind that everyone should know how to cook. Everyone. Men and women, young and old, single or married. It doesn’t matter if you don’t plan on doing much cooking, you should still know how to cook. I believe this so strongly that I listed it among my rules for a successful life. […]

Guest

//short version
Ro-man. Thank-you. If I could buy you a bag of mint oreos, I would, except well, it'd be healthier drinking turpentine, sans that tastiness that mint oreos provide.
I digress.
You said this, "one of the most important items I listed was pretty simple: say no to shit you don’t like. It is one of the hardest things you can do, and one of the best things to learn."
I love that. Stoked to read the article when I should really be doing something else.
//long version
And I 1000% agree. I'm a people pleaser and often find myself doing things I don't really want to be doing. Why? What is the point?! Of course, if it means helping someone in need or like, you know, being a kind person, I'm down. I don't want to lose *that*.
But sometimes I think I'm "too kind" and spend more time doing what other people want. I have big dreams and goals.
Speaking of, I'm trying to get in the best shape of my life and am doing StrongLifts 5x5. I just started. I've never weight trained in my life. 5x5 swears by back squats. I've heard such great things about front squats though, so I swapped those in instead.
Then a friend challenged me with this article: http://stronglifts.com/stronglifts-5x5-front-squat-vs-back-squat/
And I thought, "Crap… but I like *front* squats."
But because I'm a "rule follower" I thought, "Time to try back squats."
Not now thanks to thine article. I'm gonna do front squats. Because I like them.
I'm not looking for numbers or sports. All I want is for people to faint when I take my shirt off. Well. Just my girlfriend. (Is that too much to ask?) I think front squats will help transform me from the noodle I am now, to the beast I will be in 12 weeks.
And when I say beast, I really mean, a pretty good looking dude with his shirt off.
That's what I want. And that's what I'm going for. Thanks for the stellar writing.
Ben Wyatt. Out. :)
PS: Here's a picture from my gym today in lieu of the oreos. Try not to faint.

[...] I’m of the mind that everyone should know how to cook. Everyone. Men and women, young and old, single or married. It doesn’t matter if you don’t plan on doing much cooking, you should still know how to cook. I believe this so strongly that I listed it among my rules for a successful life. [...]

[...] I’m of the mind that everyone should know how to cook. Everyone. Men and women, young and old, single or married. It doesn’t matter if you don’t plan on doing much cooking, you should still know how to cook. I believe this so strongly that I listed it among my rules for a successful life. [...]

[...] I’m of the mind that everyone should know how to cook. Everyone. Men and women, young and old, single or married. It doesn’t matter if you don’t plan on doing much cooking, you should still know how to cook. I believe this so strongly that I listed it among my rules for a successful life. [...]

[...] I’m of the mind that everyone should know how to cook. Everyone. Men and women, young and old, single or married. It doesn’t matter if you don’t plan on doing much cooking, you should still know how to cook. I believe this so strongly that I listed it among my rules for a successful life. [...]

[...] The lesson here is simply that everything is fleeting, especially youth. Now that I’m 30, I’m starting to realize that my values and priorities are different than they were at 20. While I knew this on some level, it’s really become both more obvious and more impactful since I wrote out my list of rules for a successful life. [...]

Joshua Serrano

Hey roman thanks for this post. It made me sit back and reflect on my experiences in my life that have helped me shape me into the man I am today. And from the lessons of those experiences I have come up with my own rules that I wrote on my blog; http://www.serranostrength.com/11-rules-to-live-by (Im not sure if adding my blog post link is allowed. If not my bad man just delete the comment. I just wanted to show you the rules I came up with)

Chris Perry

Roman,
I wrote the following list for my 27th birthday because on that day, like many days, I was feeling overwhelmed with gratitude for this amazing life I live.
Last night, your list inspired me to post my list on Facebook. The feedback was fantastic.
Thank you, Roman. Enjoy!
1. Kelly - The best person ever... like, ever. For the first time in my life, I feel like I can be myself. My awkward, crazy, goofy, awesome self. I'ma marry the shit out of you!
2. Mom - I honestly cannot find the words to express what you mean to me. You taught me love, compassion and that you should always enjoy what you are doing. "The more, the merrier". Te amo, Madre.
3. Dad - Pops, everyday I become more and more like you. Pretty badass, huh? I think so. The most hard-working, creative, and loving dude I have ever met. If I can be half the man that you are, I will be happy.
4. Susan - Being a step-mom can sometimes be a thankless job. You are absolutely amazing and I cannot thank you enough for the love that you give. I am thankful everyday that you are in my life. Not to mention, you seem to always have great, objective advice for me.
5. Sara - I am more proud of you everyday. You are beautiful, smart, hilarious, and I'm certain that you will do amazing things. Keep doing you and have fun. Love you, Terd.
6. Marshall, Lexi and Coco - Dogs have the most unconditional love for you. Return the favor. To everybody.
7. Family - Best people ever. I am so thankful to have been raised around such amazing people. That goes for my new family, as well. Thanks for welcoming me into yours.
8. Friends - Like my family, you guys helped to shape who I am. And I'm awesome. So, thanks. I freaking love you guys. I couldn't have found a better bunch.
9. Laughing, thinking and crying - "If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special." - Jim Valvano
10. Cleveland Sports - One of these days there will be a parade down Euclid and I'm gonna be there for every minute of it. I may not remember it but it will be freaking glorious. The city will shut down.
11. The Gym - It's like, my shit. It is my sanctuary and I am 100% focused when I am there. It makes me a better man.
12. Deadlifts
13. Mobility/stretching/soft-tissue work - I foam roll, stretch or do yoga at least 4 times per week. Sometimes it is for 30 minutes and sometimes only 5 minutes but there has never been a time where I didn't feel better when I was finished.
14. Waking up early - Another thing I need to do more of but man it feels great to have your workout done before sunrise.
15. Partying - Pre-gaming, day drinking, shots, flip cup... Love. That. Shit.
16. Jade Sterling Steel - I appreciate the opportunity they gave me. Especially Scott Herman, who saw the potential in me.
17. Cooking - Kelly will tell you that I am good at it. Not true. I Can't wait to not live in an apartment so I can have access to a grill.
18. Saturdays - Sleep in, lift, eat, do whatever the F I want, party.
19. Clothes that fit or are tailored - Who am I kidding? My shirts are way too small on me but I like the way they look. Suns out, guns out.
20. Football season, the Brownies and fantasy football - HERE WE GO BROWNIES, HERE WE GO!
21. September - My birthday month and football season. Also, when I was a kid, because school was starting I always had some fresh threads and new kicks. I'm at my best in September.
22. An expensive meal - Steak and oysters at Red... BOOM. Don't get it often but when I do it makes me want to work hard and make some cheese. Plus, I feel like a G.
23. My iPhone
24. Road trips - Whether it is to Columbus to see my close friends or to the next thing on this badass list.
25. The beach, the sun and some margaritas - This is the life!
26. Coffee - POW POW POW!!!
27. Stimulating conversation - My cousin Michael in Belgium told me that his company has a mandatory tea time right after lunch, everyday. I love this. Nothing gets me going like good conversation. It is the ultimate upper. In a rut? Grab a cup of number 26 and find someone to rap with.
I freaking love you guys.

Jonathan Angelilli

[...] this list of ‘rules that I live by’ first came to me via John Romaniello (Roman) and his post What Would Roman Do? In which he explained his continual formation of rules that he lives by. It’s an awesome post and [...]

Robert Rajeswaran

The insight never stops. My wife loved the dog oneWe have 4 horses, 7 cats (5 are outdoor pest control) and 3 dogs. Sex drive - she looked at me and rolled her eyes, didn't even try not to. Been shredded once, but not since I was a father/husband/mortgage payer and over 40. Going to do it next year! keep it coming.

Seriously.. probably some of the best and funniest living rules I have ever read. Thanks for the read.
I'll be doing some of my own rules tonight for sure. Mamma got some to include already ^^.
keep blogging.
AWESOME!

Vaseem Akbar

I think you need to add "reply to caching client emails" to your list!
On a serious note though, this is a great idea, but I wonder of it could be structured better. For example having your first few rules based on your weaknesses, having rules for work, family etc.

Carlyterp

This was a great read, I'm so glad I found it while sifting through the vast collection of crap that is the internet. Right before I found this post I was making a list, a list so random I won't even bother explaining it here. First item... dead lifts. Luvs it. If I was making a list like yours, my #1 would be "Say thank you, all the time, everyday and mean it." Some of the most beautiful people I know are also the most gracious. Maybe even start thanking inanimate objects just for shits and giggles. When I'm feeling fat I tend to thank my chairs for not breaking under the pressure. ;-)

Johan

Nice post. Just what I was looking for actually. You never seem to disappoint me!
I added a few of your rules to my own notebook which is filled with ageless wisdom and stuff.
Please give us more posts like this one - please.

J-bear

JR you bad ass man you
What was your weight in the photo above (green Diesels)?
I'm 5'8" too, but a ways to go yet before I qualify for Romanation Citizenship.
I'm trying to figure out what my ideal body weight would be (with the ideal body - yours).
For Size Symmetry & Proportion, you rock man!

Johnabalash

Your posts continue to improve and impress me every time I read them and make me think you've got a future career as a columnist. Also impressive are your legs; damn dude, nice work!
I have t writer down a list if things I do but I just do them and some of them (like the semi colon) are on your list, one thing I do, and recommend, is saying a prayer daily. Even if you're atheist take a moment of silent humility to realize you're just one part of the world but also an integral part.

No tattoos, earrings or custom license plates.
Do not respect anyone that does not respect you.
Be approachable.
Do not take yourself too seriously.
Live in the moment, enjoy the journey.
Read. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

I found your list to be sage and funny. I don't want to ruin the mood, but I am gluten and dairy intolerant, but believe me, while I get creative, I don't feel elitist. Try buying protein powder without caseine or whey and wishing to get half as big as you. Also, it is fun, but I know what you mean, stuffing your gut doesn't make you bodybuilder ready, guys like me with little change can get lots of leftovers. Just sayin' JP

[...] down by an event I couldn’t control, and it caused me to lose sight of who I was. I stumbled to John Romaniello’s blog about the list he lives by—an idea inspired by George Washington, a rather successful gentleman [...]

#11 is one that has changed my life! It took me until age 40 to figure it out, though...
One of my own: Try to leave everyone you meet with a smile on their face! (Did I use the colon correctly?)
Your awesomeness knows no limits! <3

Ian Korn

Roman, these are great. I don't have a list of rules (yet), but I do keep a list of life goals and update it every four months. It works so much better than New Year's Resolutions. I'll forget about some of them, but I get reminded and get to re-evaluate every now and then. You're totally right about putting things in writing.

Esther

Your post make my day. It allow me to think my day in a whole different level. Recently I made small rules in my summer vacation that I will apply it in my life:
1. Live a healthy and lean life.
2. Learn little by little java language programming in Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
3. Watch anime and play video games on Tuesday and Thursday.
4. Be a wonderful daughter to my family.
5. Smile every moment i can.
6. Try to find a job. (at the same time study for college)
7. Build my fist app for android and iphone ios.

Jason

Andi

One of my favorite rules: See Bruce Springsteen live in concert at least for once in your life - it is so inspriring to feel the energy this 62-year-old guy has to rock the house for over three hours night after night.

My list...walk the talk, practice what you preach, talk is cheap.....live in the now......respect, we all have different values, beliefs and religions, don't criticize too easily, but learn from everyone and take something of each and use it, be the best you can everyday!
Thanks for amazing post! loved it!

I try to walk the talk....and keeping things real......Live in the now.......try to learn something everyday from people, we are all different, have different values, beliefs, religions, don't criticise them, take something from it and learn from it.....
Thanks loved your post!

I try to live by the "Golden Rule". Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. One of my other rules is do not Judge others! You have no idea what personal BS they're going through or what kind of day they had. Maybe you just need to give them a smile or a compliment to make their day.

Katia

Michael Custer

My top rule (#1 rule I don't know, I never numbered them, this is just one of the important ones), talk good about yourself in your own head. If you don't think you're awesome, sexy, smart, who else is going to?

David Zimmerman

R Riley

"Comfortable" should only be in a woman's decription of her workout clothes. No granny panties or flanel pj's...ever. Works wonders, especially in long-term relationships. A lot of people tend to let themselves go; instead, avoid it at all costs.
Do things for yourself, not for someone else. If you don't, whatever it is, it won't last.

rooby9

1. defy limitations, but respect boundaries.
2. you have the right to Be, and to follow your path as you see fit.
3. be all that you are, and nothing that you are not.
4. what you focus on becomes more real, and expands; focus on gratitude and what you want to see increase, not on what's 'wrong' or what you fear.
5. fear cuts you off from the light and sucks the energy right out of you.
6. sometimes playing it safe can be the most dangerous thing you can do.
7. there are many right ways, not just yours - there are some wrong ways, too.
8. we all perceive and experience the world differently from each other, according to our consciousness, capacity, conditioning, and experience.
9. keep a positive intention - and back it up with awareness and intelligent action.
10. keep a foundation of compassion - but remember that compassion never means being a doormat, that it means maintaining and respecting appropriate boundaries, and that sometimes what is needed can be (Buddhist) 'wrathful compassion.'
11. laughter is powerfully healing; it dissolves pain, and breaks up crystallization.
12. in conflict, always minimize harm to all parties.
'strong people are harder to kill, and more useful in general' -- Mark Rippetoe (on t-shirts at my gym)
and my evil twin Skippy submits:
A. never make a promise you can't remember.
B. never admit to being older than your bra size.
C. keep 'em guessing!
D. every once in a while, ya gotta just roll on the floor and make animal noises!

#2 and #59 are worth the price of admission. I also like leather jackets (#31) and own several. It may be generational, but I didn't get the Star Wars rule and dating rule. I'd probably go the other way. I don't think I've even seen them all. Maybe I could substitute a couple of John Wayne movies or some Clint Eastwood as dating criteria. Anyway, you asked for one or two rules from me. I'll give you eight.
1) Always respect your mother.2) Be nice most of the time, but don't be a doormat.3) Lose your temper when needed. (People need to know that you do have a fastball in the quiver.)4) Figure out a way to have fun at everything you do or figure out how not to do it anymore.5) In most instances, take nothing but pictures and leave no trace.6) Under promise and over deliver.7) Don't whine.8) Carry your own pack.

Skeeter

1) Do what you say you will do, when you say you will do it. If something comes up to prevent that, call and let them know.
2) DO NOT take it out on those who cannot answer back. (Waitstaff, call center phone jockeys, etc.)
(the definition of it is left as an exercise for the reader....)
Roman, really enjoyed your list!

Karen

Christine H

LOVE the list, Roman! Here are two if mine:
1) Don’t drink the kool aide. Always maintain some skepticism. When you find an organization you believe it, get engaged, but don’t accept everything as true. Buy in to about 80%, and continue to ask questions to improve yourself, the organization, and those around you.
2) Sit up straight. Not only will it make you look more slender and imbue confidence, it’ll help you move better and feel better for years to come. Hunchback of Notre Dame is a great book, but not a great image for you.
Cheers!
C

Us fans love you because you're smart but definitely not an "elitist asshole" ;) Thanks for sharing more than your professional/fitness advice. I own a lot of books but thinking should go digital because some are starting to rot. Thoughts? Two of my rules: "kill them with kindness" (borrowed) and "work on yourself first" (mine). Sometimes hard to do, but in the end, they always work and always help to pick yourself up.

Lisa Codignotto

Three, non-negotiable rules, for the first day of every month 1- start a new book 2- tell your mother you love her 3- dust-off the appartement (including "under the furniture impossible to get spots").

You're DARING to put up that picture (and then call them panties, I laughed out loud.. literally)..
I particularly respect #18... and now also live by that sentiment... at least since I got ripped!
Thanks for an inspiring post.

Roman, this is great. Both inspirational and hilarious simultaneously. I made a list of "My Rules" while reading Nate Green's Hero Handbook. After reading this I'm gonna make some modifications and apply more awesomeness everyday. Thanks Roman.

ALWAYS at least TRY for at least a kiss on the first date! The sooner you can establish intimacy, the more likely she'll think of you in a romantic way & not "just a friend".
Tip above avg. It's not my job to cover some asshole's cheapness.
Don't do anything you hate unless it's for someone you love.

Brittany Reed

Great list. One of my favorites is; If it didn't come from the earth or have a mother, I probably shouldn't eat it (but maybe on cheat day! ). I'm certain that I have others, but I've currently forgotten them. Also, I wont date someone who doesn't read.

Brittany Reed

An other of mine is to be what I refer to as a Day Maker. Doing nice things for strangers. It may be opening the door for someone, buying their coffee, complimenting, letting them in traffic... anything.

Ken Chinavare

So cool Roman. And comprehensive. Everything from first dates to business to fitness.
10 years ago I married an Italian girl and at the reception all the male guests from her side found me, congratulated me, and handed me their gift. By the end of the night I had 30 envelopes in my suit pocket. Since that night I have handed envelopes to the groom at every wedding. Some look at me strange, but I remember the personal impression it made on me during my big night. I like looking the groom in the eye, thanking him for having me and telling him how lucky he is. I find it very impersonal to drop a gift into a fucking wishing well.

Andy Smith

List of life rules:
1.“This too shall pass”-nothing is permanent... Good times or bad, they will not go on forever
2.Live with a smile on your face
3.Accept all human beings are flawed in a multitude of unique ways and there is nothing innately bad about having flaws
4.Don’t accept your flaws as a given; work on them
5.Smile at a stranger-you may make their day
6.Wake up at the same time every morning and go to bed at the same time every night
7.Don’t let hard times be an excuse for poor health and abuse of substances
8.Write a list of goals-monthly, weekly and daily and do them
9.Read a book
10.Tell your loved ones they are important on a regular basis
11.Give people sincere, thoughtful compliments
12.Be honest to people-why do you spend time with people who you feel the need to lie to?
13.Work hard in all your endeavors-if you want to be good at something you will have to work for it...Things seldom fall into place by themselves; there is no way around hard work
14.“Never Let Go”-Dan John. I can’t add to that.
15.Define yourself, don’t allow others to do so. You needn’t rely on the opinion of others to accomplish your own goals and desires.
16.Don’t skimp on the food budget-I wouldn’t fuel my car with cheap sugars and refined junk...Where is the logic in doing that to myself?
17.“Eat real food, not too much, mostly plants”-Michael Pollan.
18.As above with the addendum “But with a kick ass feast every now and then
19.Don’t live to work, work to live-enjoy your life instead of wasting it at a computer chair
20.Buy nice clothes that fit well, there is no point paying for the label if you look like the kid with the hand-me-downs even when you’re in your twenties.
21.Don’t try to make a fashion statement at an important meeting, keep it simple and professional
22.If I find myself spending more time on Facebook than on my studies or hobbies then something is going very wrong in my life
23.If you are going to say that something is worth nothing or badly made, etc. then actually watch it/read it first before passing off some half plagiarized smorgasbord type of review
24.Pain is temporary and when you push through to the other side you will either be stronger, smarter, more wise or generally better as a person for suffering through it.
25.Invest in a very good chef’s knife
26.Buy well made cookware, a good saute pan, a good pot and a solid cast-iron skillet too
27.Invest in a good coffee machine
28.Buy a coffee grinder
29.Buy only organic coffee beans and grind as needed
30.Drink coffee in the morning, black, no sugar, no sweeteners
31.Drink water for the rest of the day
32.Every once in a while drink whatever the hell you want, just don’t overdo it
33.Don’t belittle people for their decisions, everyone has their own goals and yours may seem as crazy to them as their’s are to you
34.Never be afraid to fail-regardless of what you are trying, don not allow the fear of failure to stop chasing your vision
35.No one cares about the fact you were football captain when you were fourteen, what have you done recently worth mentioning? If the answer is "nothing" I suggest finding something very quickly
36.Sleep in total darkness and leave your phone on the other side of the room on silent
37.Always get back to people who have called you or emailed you, etc. If they have took the time to get in touch with you, you can take the time to reply
38.Try everything once, you may not get the opportunity again
39.Keep a journal of your thoughts and activities, make it a habit and you will see why
40.Have a morning and night time routine to start and end your day how you should and want to
41.Don’t skimp on the quality of your mattress or bedding-your sleep and your girlfriend will thank you
42.Exercise regularly
43.When you do, train hard, lift heavy and know when to back off a bit
44.Focus on compound lifts and do accessory stuff when you have the time and energy
45.“If something is important do it every day, if it isn’t, don’t do it all”-Dan Gable
46.Do some sprints every once in a while
47.Enjoy training, if you aren’t enjoying it then something is wrong
48.Don’t hoard useless shit
49.Floss twice daily
50.Consume fish oil everyday
51.Don’t allow yourself to lose control of your environment
52.Spend less each month than you earn
53.Save 15% of your income for a rainy day
54.Cut negative people out of your life
55.Meditate or reflect daily for about half an hour
56.Stretch Daily
57.Foam Roll Daily
58.Take in as much sunlight as you can
59.Have fun with fitness, try new exercises, train outside, play a team sport
60.Don’t aim for perfection, aim for the best that is humanly possible... That may well result in ‘perfection’ until someone betters your achievement
61.Make time for family and friends all the time, if that means missing one day at the gym to attend a family party then do it-you won’t be here forever
62.Don’t blame other people for your shortcomings, accept responsibility like a man and prove them wrong next time and when you prove them wrong be humble
63.Listen to good music every day
64.Take time to enjoy the small fortunes around you, remember the times you were without electricity and water and appreciate the little things
65.Fast intermittently
66.A bad test score is not the end of the world, a failed job interview isn’t either; pick yourself up and try again
67.Don’t stay sat down for more than an hour at any given time in a day, get up and stretch or go for a quick walk. Anything.
68.Express how you feel politely but firmly, never allow people to walk over you or take advantage of your good nature
69.Did I say read a book? Yes? In that case, read another book
70.When you meet someone for the first time introduce yourself clearly and confidently. There is no need to tell them about your new diet or how you think yoga will solve world hunger... Just be charming and insightful
71.Enjoy love and nurture relationships, don’t turn them into a political mine field of gamesmanship and oneupmanship
72.Don’t keep clothes, underwear or socks that are irreparable. Buy new ones and let the old go
73.Go somewhere you have always wanted to go, travel every chance you get, see the world whilst you can
74.Listen twice as much as you talk
75.Don’t just listen, absorb what is really being said
76.Get out of your comfort zone as often as possible
77.Play an instrument, even if you suck at first... you will improve. No one wrote a symphony over night without lots of training and practice first
78.Be selfless, do at least one good deed every single day that will go unnoticed and don’t claim the credit
79.Be generous, give your time and effort to an endeavor that won’t result in immense riches, rather immense good will and karma
80.Don’t smoke cigarettes, ever.
81.Don’t do illegal drugs, ever.
82.If others choose to do so, don’t be a condescending prick about it. If their behavior doesn’t affect you let them live their lives.
83.If their behavior is deleterious to you and those around you, don’t sit back and let it happen
84.Write a letter to someone you care about every once in a while
85.Learn a foreign language, even if you can only speak a little bit you never know when it may come in handy
86.Don’t hold grudges. Life is too short and unpredictable to hold a grudge
87.Don’t cause hurt to others intentionally (unless there are extenuating circumstances in which the scores need to be evened out)
88.Eat organic locally grown food as much as you can afford to
89.Don’t waste money on supplements if you can’t even get the staples of a healthy life style right
90.Stop wasting time on the tiny details of a diet or training program if you can’t squat properly or eat right
91.Enjoy the company of others and reciprocate their time and energy. Don’t make them regret being around you
92.Don’t stay in a relationship because you are afraid to hurt someone’s feelings, if it isn’t working tell them. Just don’t be a dick about it
93.Try to be 1% better at the end of the day than you were at the start
94.Buy good face wash and after shave, a good toothbrush is a must also
95.If you think you are overtraining then take a couple of days off. If the pain persists, see someone about it instead of turning a pain into a full blown injury
96.Ask for help from others who would know better than you. Don’t buy into macho bullshit and appeal to those around you who have tailored their lives to a specific part that you are unaccustomed to
97.Never let a single event or decision consume you and overcome who you really are. There is more to life than next week’s exam, don’t get tunnel vision and neglect what is actually important
98.Buy thoughtful gifts, don’t just throw money at birthdays of friends and family. A well thought out and considerate gift will go down much better than cash in a card
99.Do that thing you keep saying you are going to do but haven’t yet... Buy the new car, hit the gym first thing in the morning, go skydiving, whatever it is... Just be proactive and stop waiting for life to come to you with all the options
100.Take charge of yourself, don’t be pushed around or forced into unpleasant/undesirable situations or relationships. Think about the opportunity cost of doing that is right as opposed to going with it because it is what is expected. Don’t just follow the current, be your own person
101.Every was born with a specific purpose, find out what yours is and don’t lose sight of why you are here. Spread as much happiness as you can whilst achieving what you want to achieve. Stop comparing your sprint time to Usain Bolt and be the best YOU that you can be102. There is NO WAY to avoid hard work...So do the hard work and reap the benefits for life.

Dean Phillips

Andy Smith

It's not quite as enlightened or experienced as your list, maybe one day I will possess the knowledge bombs you do Mr Romaniello, for now I will just learn from the best (like yourself) and develop as best I can. Thanks for the amazing work you have done, and will continue to put out.

Dean Phillips

This list was awesome
"Take the lead. Always suggest days and times to meet, instead of leaving it in the air"
Cant agree with this more
one rule: "never talk down to someone" just because someone doesn't know what i may know, does not mean i have a free pass to talk shit to them

Stephen C

Bai Mei Rule - sometimes people who aren't nice, or who are outright assholes, have good stuff to teach. Learn it (doesn't make YOU an asshole too) and use it for good.
On a related note, people younger than you/less experienced than you will do stuff better than you, in a field you think you think, by rights, that you should be better than them in. Get over it, learn from them also. You don't try to tamp down a prodigy, you use them to boost yourself after doing them the courtesy of recognizing how good they are. Still stings, though.

Erik

Thank you for an excellent read. Really a lot of good ones here. Number 57 especially was hilarious and the nr 10 with Star Wars was also very good. I tried the same but with Seinfeld, however yet to meet a woman that actually understands and enjoys it, and therefore had to withdraw that rule from my list. I´ll probably borrow your Star Wars rule instead from now on.
Another thing, that I recently discovered, from Nate Greens The hero handbook, is the value of using a timer when working or studying to make it more efficient. When using a timer, 30 mins of work actually means 30 mins of work and not 15 work/15 mail/blogs/Facebook etc.
Keep up the good work with the blog.

I don't like dogs. But, I'm the leader of the pack...they do what I want.
Semicolons rock.
#51--someone has read "Lost Horizon".
And, #53, I'm still working on the introduction thing. I can't seem to remember who to introduce to whom, even though I've been taught this since 2nd grade. The compliment should seal the deal--I'm going to practice. I already try to compliment everyone I meet each day. It puts all conversations on a positive note.

As long as it's a bold, confident smile that says you don't just own the room, you own the WHOLE FUCKIN WORLD!!!
& keep your head up when walking around, don't look slightly down like everyone else! Trust me this will set you apart in a good way!

Jereme Daniels

Pure awesome, especially "If someone doesn’t like dogs for a reason other than fear or allergies, I’m simply not interested."
If you don't "like dogs," unless as a kid you were mauled by your Welsh neighbour's prized corgi, you're likely boring, self-absorbed, and suck in bed.
As for semi-colons, to me it says, "I have a BA in English. And when I start my Masters in Journalism, the J-profs are going to beat those cute little dots right the fuck out of me."