Vote Smeagol 2016 – A Candidate You Can Trust

Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m honored and excited to bring you this special announcement.

Though the media has not yet picked up on this story, word has just been leaked to this author through an inside source, of an official latecomer to the 2016 U.S. Presidential election race.

The candidate in question is none other than Smeagol, a former hobbit best known for his role in The Lord Of The Rings.

The initial press briefing took place behind closed doors, yet Curving.org has had the good fortune of obtaining these unreleased still photos of Smeagol’s early campaign platform.

Smeagol will be running as an Independent, and has not yet declared a running mate, though it is speculated that it will in fact be his own alter ego, Gollum.

Smeagol promises not to hurt you, and as you know, Smeagol’s word is his bond.

Despite the election being a few short months away, with a platform this appealing, he is sure to become the next POTUS.

If this blog’s previous editorial on American literary icon Henry David Thoreau’s stance against voting did not give you pause for thought, and you are still torn between having to vote for the lesser of two evils in the form of Clinton or Trump, then you may now have a viable alternative.