Want to lose 2 stone...

Largely because I can't find 'normal' clothes to fit me any more! I also have a form of body dysmorphia (entirely self-diagnosed ) in that I don't think I'm that fat, til I see the inevitable holiday photo or try and buy say underwear and see myself in those mirrors & . I can self deceive quite well.

My plan is to eat less, eat more mindfully and exercise more. And stop drinking pinot like a fish. DH is along for the ride, too.

My current goal is to lose 2 lbs in one week (Friday morning is weigh-in day).

Say 'no' to malt loaf at this stage of weight loss!! . Once you get to a stage of really understanding your body's food needs and your desires (can't see me ever actually achieving that, tbh!) I guess you can have malt loaf in the house and have one, small slice now and then.

I don't have cakes and biscuits in the house, usually, though I had to get rid of the remains of the Xmas goodies (see that value-weighting, again!) prior to embarking on weight loss! My family don't have a very sweet tooth which helps. I do tend to have 70kcal muesli bars around though, and might have one mid morning, though I try and have an apple or one ryvita with a cup of tea.

Had a fry up for breakfast today- a piece of toasted rye bread (40cals?), a poached egg and a piece of dry-fried bacon, the 'round' bit, no fat or rind. Rather have a full English though! But an acceptable compromise. Soup and a thin slice or 2 of baguette for lunch, then whatever my mum comes up with for family dinner tonight. Bit of a minefield as I don't want her to know I am on a diet. I don't need it to be splashed all around my wider family and more distant friends where mum knows their mums. The intimate details of gynae issues etc she happily tells me about these women is astounding! Don't want to provide any ammo!

Then I shall do a 30 minute 'power walk' on the treadmill watching telly, 1.75 miles at 3.6 mph, incline of 3! Gets me to break a sweat and raises my heart-rate a fair bit.

Mamaus, I would avoid malt loaf like the plague, it is the most moreish food ever invented. I have banned it even though DSD adores it. We both jsut cram it in in a frenzy. But actually I did Ok today, we went to a cafe and had soup and "herby scone". Which means butter and cheese crammed mountain of bready deliciousness, but the whole wait after each mouthful and see if I'm full thing really worked because i ate so slowly i enjoyed a third of it (DS got the rest and promptly ground it into the floor) ten times more than i would have enjoyed the whole thing eaten at my usual hoover speed. Plus kept looking at my phone screensave of the dress. I agree wiht you erebus about keeping the end result in mind, it's much more motivating than trying on undersized clothes I find! I did I can make you think a good few years back, it didn't work unequivocally at first, but actually has been teh basis of my successful weight loss campaigns. Shame I threw out the window when pg and put on four stone of fizzy sweets and lasagne . Samnella I personally think you need to be a way into successul losing before you can have the tempting stuff nearby. I am the same about once i start I find i've eaten the lot unless - why make it harder for yourself. In a couple of weeks, when you're glorying in your success, you can have the things in the house and laugh in their faces. I look forward to mocking oaty biscuits and Fudge bars.

I don't like advertising being on a diet either. What about saying you had a massive fry up and feel a bit stuffed, so you can do the stopping when full and not finishing whatever it is? My mum is like a sparrow and i hate owning up to being on a diet. With the best will in the world she says things like, just don't snack dear and the weight will fall off.

spruced oh yes, re motherly advice. My mum says exactly the same sort of things, like '3 solid, good meals a day and no snacking, that's the way'... yes, she's 79, 5'4" and just on the cusp of 14 and 16 BUT she smokes about 30+ a day and has done since she was 20; she stopped twice (I can well remember...) and lasted less than a year each time- why? Because she started piling weight on!

So I take that advice from whence it comes. In fact, faced with, once again, the same size slab of food she also serves my DH, I did say actually, less for me, I have a couple of lbs to lose and she was off- how much? Over what time scale? Eat this, don't eat that etc so she does know but I shan't mention it and be evasive when questioned again! I know she always comments when my cousins' DC (early to mid 20s, now) are on diets, I always get the details like 'Well, she's doing some daft Zambo style thing, twice a week I believe, ridiculous- and goes out to some dieting club once a week, but my sister (said dieter's gran) says she's lost 3 stone but then she certainly had that to lose, wide beam, you know'... (Having not seen the poor girl in, oh, 5 years?!)

So.... no.

Probably blew my calories tonight tho, sausage casserole (tho I offloaded one of 3 sausages to DS1), a mountain of mash (ate 1/2) and green beans, all aswim in sauce, followed by a shop bought cheesecake which DH served and gave me a bit more than I should have eaten, but I did anyway ... but I did do half an hour on the treadmill tonight!

Sprucedup I have banned all biscuits, cakes etc as I know I just cant handle it all right now. Like you say I may come back to it later.

So. Day one has gone well. I think. Porridge with a teaspoon of sugar for breakfast. We then went to go to the cinema but as it turned out I had forgotten my bank card and DH had forgotten his wallet so had to miss the cinema and placate our disappointed children with a MacD which we fortunately had enough change for. I will admit I ate 5 fries. Yes I counted them. I came home and made some soup from a bag of frozen veg. I have to say it was akin to the devils spawn but by then I was so hungry the deed had to be done. I tried a WW pita bread but that made the soup look good so opted for 3 poppy seed crackers. Followed by an orange. DH made some lovely looking fairy cakes with the kids which although tempted I avoided. I busied myself with cleaning the bedrooms . Particularly my daughters which was truly hideous. I even tidied and reorganised the airing cupboard . At one point I considered removing the curtains from our room for a wash but that seemed a step too far . Dinner was a bit disorganised as I had ordered with Sainsburys but they were late so had planned sea bass and salad but instead had pasta with home made tomato sauce. I know DH uses a lot of olive oil so had a small portion and a side salad followed by a yogurt.

I definitely haven't drunk enough today. But judging by my wee I am normally in a state of dehydration so no change there.

Tomorrow I plan to have avocado quesadillas for lunch and sea bass for dinner.

Eating phlegmy WW soup right now. Picturing my bum NOT looking like a bag frozen peas in chiffony dress. Spicy salmon noodles tonight, plan to make them just too spicy for me so DPs happy and I don't go mad. erebus about the sausages, it's about feeling good about what you eat next time not bad about what you ate last time... yeehah whoop whoop!!!! Very un-British moment there sorry, not used to being openly positive.

I had soup for lunch, too, just ordinary chunky potato and leek (180cals) in a microwaveable pot and a slice of rye bread (45 cals), then an apple (65 cals?).

I know what you mean about 'feeling bad'- I guess I'd feel worse if a) I'd scoffed the lot without thinking- at least I gave away one sausage to DS, and left 1/2 the mash! and b) if it really had seriously blown me out of the water, calorie wise! It was 'heavy going' I'd say, and I know I can now make such food more healthily (fat free frying, leek-padded mash, more veg for instance) at home- which is great cos it means I can eat 'normal food' now which to me is important in not thinking 'right now I am Mrs Dieting and when I reach my target weight, I will be 'Mrs Old-Way-Of-Eating again''.

I see eating at mother's as a part of my '20% of eating not so well in a week. That and my pinot habit!

TBH & TMI- I am 50 and perimenopausal so I don't know what sort of ride I'm going to get each month! I'd hoped this one had 'done its dash' but it renewed its vigour, if you get my drift, last night. I'm on one notch wider on my jeans belt, too which strongly implies water retention not a 1lb weight gain, as such.

So I am not panicking or despairing. Luckily it's still 3 whole days to weigh in, time for that fluid to dissipate.

Dreadful day today - two cappuccinos, three Fab lollies, 2 school bars, a ginger biscuit, and a mountain of bread and hummus. Pizza crusts from DSDs dinner and baby biscuits and bits of yoghurt form DS. Not one healthy mouthful unless you count the cucumber on the full fat hummus and all eaten at a million miles an hour. It was all i could do not to run to the shop and by a multipack of doubledeckers and shove them all in my mouth in one go. God knows what came over me. I'm even hungry now.

But I had an amazing sandpaper/laser-stabbing facial this evening and have 80% less wrinkles and the skin i had five years ago. This has made me feel so much better about frankly everything in the world that I'm contemplating a run. (This isn't as weird as it sounds, I am a runner and often go at nine at night.)

Oh the spicy thing backfired, it was like lava and neither of us could eat so we had tears and cereal for tea. But tomorrow is another day.

erebus maybe drink buckets of water, i'm told it has the opposite effect? But not sure.

Here to confess to a "setback" this evening, dominos pizza, 2 for Tuesday, Dh suggested and I was weak! Having said that, I tried to keep the eating slowly and consciously concept in mind, and stopped after 2 slices. So, not as terrible as it could have been. Unlike days of old, I am not going to say to myself, oh well already had pizza, may as well have cake. (Sure, there is absolutely no cake , biscuits or malt loaf in the house, but still!)

Also, think I may need to invest in a better scale. We only have a cheap mechanical one, 5 year old argos number I believe. The type of scale that you can lose a pound or 2 by leaning a certain way--I have only been cheating myself!!

I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to advertise being a diet. I really don't want a bunch of unsolicited advice or judgement. I also don't want to be one of those people who is constantly announcing what they are eating or not eating, and letting it become all that they talk about--I will save that for here!

I also look forward to being strong enough to mock oaty biscuit and fudge bars (that made me lol) and I hope to one day encounter a brownie and think, "meh, no thanks". But until then, I will just keep them out of the house, my dh is not a fan of this plan!

What am I thinking? The rectitude of a Presbyterian minister all day then, wham. You could probably hear me glugging wine! Possibly a billion calories? 450 actually. Was doing well til then, poss about 1100 cals all up!

mamaus stopping at 2 slices of Dominos is actually indeed a triumph to be celebrated! Well done. It's 'real' food but you stopped and recognised it wasn't a green light to gorge. I am genuinely impressed.

As for the scales, if it's not a burden on the budget, get new, whizzy, digital ones and put them on the same bit of solid flooring for each weigh-in. When individual pounds count, you wanna know!

And yes, this is the forum to let it all hang out re your triumphs and (ahem) 'fails' <thinks 3 glasses of bloody wine, fgs!>

I am learning about all kinds of foods to avoid, I just asked Dh, what are fab lollies and double deckers? He assured me that they are both amazing I am going to add them to my avoid list. I think dh may get both for his lunch tomorrow, he getting nostalgic now!

Don't beat yourself up too much about the wine, easily done and tomorrow's a new day.

mamaus stopping at two slices is brilliant. That's how it should be in food heaven, enjoy it then stop at hte right point. I'm really impressed too, that shall be my inspiration tomorrow.

erebus why did i go mental today? I didn't run, i just went and ate cereal too. Period due? Wont say that out loud, but could be the culprit. Also, tried to be too frugal in the morning, felt crashy from hunger and went bananas, then thought i've runined it now so sod it. The fabs were two in a row in the afternoon, then innocently having one with DP and DSD after thier dinners. Skipped real dinner to compensate for afternoon freakout. I think what i should take from this is eat little and often and well and don't get too hungry. Also, in retrospect, talked about some really really sad bereavement issues of friends, and felt a bit bleak after. Genuinely thought schools bars would cheer me up. They didn't, they don't even taste nice. Box fit tomrrow night and its a new day. Mums coming, so I shall pick listlessly at food as if thats what i really want! She always brings a bucket of pinot, i haven't been drinking because DPs on meds so he can't at the mo so i joined. Focus on not having a hangover on thursday perhaps.

1100 calories would be a good day for me I have to say, so you must have been really good otherwise. Mamaus is our postergirl for good eating tomorrow, if I'd done that I would be skipping about mega pleased with myself. And we will tomorrow!

I was doing so well til I went nuts with the wine! I did beat myself a up a bit about it- I mean, fgs. Careful mindful eating all day (which as we all know is quite hard work!) then undoing it all in the space of the evening!

Today's strategy is to goto the organic greengrocers of poshness and buy fruit, and picture myself in skinny jeans looking at spag bol and saying "I'm a bit full, I don't really fancy it," and languidly picking at a salad as if it was too much to bear.

I received my copy of "I Can Make You Thin" today, suppose I will have to read and not just sit next to it and dink around the Internet...

Today's tiny victory, did not order anything fun for tomorrow's online shop, had biscuits in the basket, and took them out--baby steps!

Never been a poster girl for healthy eating before, hopefully I can keep it up.

Wanted to ask you spruced , I used to be a runner in my teens, and have really wanted to try couch to 5k, my only time to do it would be after dark though (here come the excuses!) I live in a relatively safe area, but think I would be paranoid running in the dark, should I just get a high viz jacket and get over it?

Am a bit meh having just watched 'The truth about exercise' - Panorama? By Michael Moseley (again!) and he discovered he is an exercise 'non responder' (it's genetic!) thus hours pounding an exercise bike wasn't going to improve his aerobic capacity, tho it did improve his insulin performance considerably. I believe myself to be the same. Over decades I have spent hours at gyms, running & pumping but it actually made all but no difference to my stamina, appearance or sense of well-being! I am glad to have some sort of explanation, actually!

I shall continue doing my 3 to 4 sessions of power walking for 30 mins each week, tho. It's been shown that exercise does improve one's ability to burn calories. I'd get myself actually genetically tested but I know it'd cost £.

Different topic and sorry, maybe TMI... Since I've been mindful about my food intake, tho eating fruit and oats for most breakfasts, salad or soup for lunch and veg laden dinners... I haven't -ahem- Number 2'ed for a week! That's not good, really, is it? I was never 'daily' but a week?!

Interesting about exercise "non responders" that must be very frustrating. I am really lucky, I suppose, that in the past when I have made an effort, exercise can make a really drastic improvement on my appearance and mood. Huh, so why I am not exercising now... Must change that!

About the tmi, are you uncomfortable? Maybe your body is using all of the healthy goodness? (Clearly, I am no doctor!) Hope everything, um, works out for you tomorrow

erebus, i have the same tmi issue every time i do this! I have a vague theory it's because your body slows down across the board at first in recognition of the sudden change in apparent food availability. Water is my cure - well squash becuase water is so boring and in our area tap water tastes like dirty pool water. Still doesn't work that well. Annoying about the excersize, i find running regularly can tip me into a virtuous cycle of healthiness. Could you not maximise on the smug factor? I find that goes a lot way for me!

mamaus you know how it is the excersze, the first week back is crap and then it gets fun again. Went running yesterday - nearly got blown over in the gale but it was great. I'm playing netball tonight, with a group of mums going back to it after many years. It's so much fun that even if it doesn't make a difference its worht it for hte feelgood. Get back to it! You know it'll be worth it!

Mum came yesterday, bearing homemade parma ham and mozzarella bread, oh it was good, but I had just a couple of reasonable sized bits, literally thinking of you and the pizzas. Fell down on the risotto she made after that, but not too badly. Then DP produced a huge chocolate cigar, and i had quite a lot of that. But importantly no unhinged face stuffing. I think i did well under the circumstances. And mum said i look like i've lost weight and took DS while i went running, so she is totally forgiven!

You'll all be delighted to her my TMI ishoo has 'resolved itself'- ahem. . Not particularly spectacularly but nonetheless, 'not an issue' any more right now!

I must now stand at the high altar and confess a transgression- an illegal weigh-in this morning. Soz! I was pleased to note a small downward trend- but the biggie is whether tomorrow morning I am still 'there' or not. So I shan't reveal til weigh-in day, where either it will be a triumph of slow and steady loss or the ups and down of stabilising, when I should be losing!

I did MPC 'trance' on my ipod last night which I rather enjoyed. The main 'problem' I have with it is the word 'slim'. Which is ridiculous but cultural, against the backdrop of my venerable age (50). Slimming, as a word is always to me redolent of 'Slimcea' bread ('70s?). I don't know what I'd rather hear him say, though. 'Picture the new, slimmer you'- what, then? Not 'fitter' because that's now become loaded. To lose weight doesn't necessarily imply 'fitter' in the traditional sense, or necessarily in the new yoof usage, does it? And I don't know how positively any of us might react to 'Oi, you, yer heffer, wanna be less of a bloater?' even though set against twinkly music. Can't see it. .

So what is the sound-bite word that means 'the correct weight for your height'?

mamaus - excellent that exercise works for you. You gotta get 'out there' and make it work its majik for you! You know it makes sense!

spruced- I guess 'habit' now keeps me pounding the treadmill. I recognise I am fortunate in that I have a decent quality electric treadmill set up in our second sitting room facing a WAG'esque sized HD telly (you can take a DH out of Australia but you can't take the HD telly away from the DH- or something..) on which I find myself very fast walking to 'Africa' or 'What the South of France did for Art' stylee shows (Richard E Grant can inspire me any time he wants) without counting time or steps. Well done re the food your mum brought. It was 'proper' food but you ate in a controlled manner. Tonight was Asda curry night (with my mum who brings her own raft of stuff associated with weight loss/diets/ 'eat like I do, darling, and you will be as svelte as me at 80' (but smoke 40 a day for 60 years to keep your weight down).. BUT I left the table feeling I'd had 'sufficient' but not excess- though I have drunk 2 large gasses of pinot