A dozen men and women dressed in business attire sit around a table. Several appear to be ANGRY. Baskets of various chips and snacks are scattered throughout the table. Frito Lay executives are questioning our hero, Burt Dorito.

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 1: What the fuck!? This is the worst fucking chip I've ever fucking had. Foster! How many of these godforsaken things did we make.

FOSTER: We have somewhere on the order of 1500 tons of it at the warehouse.

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 1: FUCK!

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 2 (in unison): FUCK!

BURT DORITO: They're not that bad. They taste like hamburgers! With pickles!

MARKETING WEENIE 1: Look, it's easy. We'll do a contest or something. We can simply pretend that we don't know what to name the new flavor, and allow customers to enter by submitting names for the new chip.

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 1: I think "Shitburger" will work.

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 2: Good work Marketing Weenies. Hey asshat, what's the project number on this atrocity?

BURT DORITO: X-13D

FRITO LAY EXECUTIVE 1: Great, print it.

2. INT. WAWA MARKET - NOON

Several people enter WAWA, looking to get some lunch. The store is CROWDED. Two SCHMUCKS, JANE DOE and TALLMAN, order a sandwhich, grab their ticket and go to get a drink and snack to go with their sandwhich. As they approach the snack isle, they notice something new:

TALLMAN: Whoa, what the fuck is that?

JANE DOE: Looks like a new flavor of Doritos!

TALLMAN: Yeah, but what flavor.

JANE DOE: I dunno. Looks like they want us to name it for them.

TALLMAN: Lazy fuckers.

JANE DOE: Yeah.

TALLMAN: I'm intrigued though. I'm getting it.

JANE DOE: Me too.

3. EXT. WEST CHESTER TOWNSHIP PARK - NOON

Several people sit at a PICNIC TABLE, enjoying their lunch.

TALLMAN: Gross

JANE DOE (in unison): Gross

4. INT. DESK - MIDNIGHT

TALLMAN: I'm sure I'm giving these Frito Lay people way too much credit.

Oh my god that was hilarious. A couple friends of friends I was hanging out with yesterday were just going off about how disgusting these things are. Specifically one of them said "you know how you'll finish a McDonald's cheeseburger, even though it tastes like shit? Well you'll finish these too, even though they taste like shit."

A while ago, they made these Taco Bell chips that were actually kinda decent, but they don't make them anymore and I can't say as though I'm all that upset about it. Nothing really beats the original. I don't know why all these companies think they need to constantly invent new flavors. Half the flavors don't even sound ok, let alone taste ok. Bleh.