Bridegroom the Movie

This is a gay website and yet I haven't seen anyone post or say anything about an important new documentary "Bridegroom - The Movie", which is a gay love story and the tragedy that follows when same-sex relationships are not respected.

I don't have anything to do with the movie, am not in PR or whatever. I just want to make you aware that it will be airing on OWN on October 27.

i believe it will also be available for streaming on Netflix.

by Anonymous

reply 61

06/12/2014

And you get a husband. And you get a husband.

Everybody gets a husband!!!

by Anonymous

reply 1

10/22/2013

I posted about it last month or so. There's also a huge thread about the story when it first got public.

Just because you don't know how to search properly....

by Anonymous

reply 2

10/22/2013

r2, the movie just premiered though.

by Anonymous

reply 3

10/22/2013

Ridiculous. I had worse happen to me and I'm still relatively privileged. A truly shocking documentary could have been made. But instead we have to hear from the privileged golden youth.

by Anonymous

reply 4

10/22/2013

R4, not every story can be made into a movie. Just be glad that the movie might reach people outside the community and perhaps open some eyes.

by Anonymous

reply 5

10/22/2013

Thanks for the reminder OP..I agree with you on your post.

R2, not everyone here is as perfect as you and your fucking rules.

R4...self righteous dick..

The movie airs tonight on OWN at 10PM Eastern time.

Story and trailer at the link. The movie has had a "highly successful run on the film festival circuit"

by Anonymous

reply 6

10/27/2013

I enjoyed this speech from "Bridegroom" producer Linda Bloodworth-Thomason at the GLSEN awards. It's hard not to imagine her funniest lines coming out of Dixie Carter's mouth.

by Anonymous

reply 7

10/27/2013

Ah, the star crossed lovers, happy till..you know, one fell off the roof.

by Anonymous

reply 8

10/27/2013

It's a sad sad story.

by Anonymous

reply 9

10/27/2013

Just a reminder, this movie airs tonight on OWN network at 10PM US EST.

by Anonymous

reply 10

10/27/2013

I would have put ads in their local newspaper announcing that they were having a memorial in town set up by his military boyfriend that he was engaged to.

I swear, I would have gone on a LEGAL vendetta against these cunts.

by Anonymous

reply 11

10/30/2013

Just watched it on Netflix. I don't think I've ever cried so much during a movie. In fact I know I haven't. I do believe my eyes were teary from start to finish. MARY! Of course it helps when they're attractive.

Gay men don't really have fairytale relationships like that, do they? If so I'm jealous 'cause I'll never have that.

by Anonymous

reply 12

10/31/2013

Completely overrated. Melissa McCarthy is just disgusting and not even funny.

by Anonymous

reply 13

10/31/2013

Help me, I'm poor!

by Anonymous

reply 14

10/31/2013

It's still baffling to me how he fell off that roof. And it was a bit creepy how the friend was singing about someone falling off the edge. Tom had a beautiful singing voice.

by Anonymous

reply 15

11/02/2013

The first time I heard about this I thought it was made up. Contrived. CREATED by actors as a political statement. A strong political statement. Those guys are way too pretty, too "perfect," too ooeey gooey sappy happy for that to be real. It reads like a movie and plays like a movie.

Then again, truth is stranger than fiction and I am sorry for the guy's loss. Hey, most people NEVER find THAT kind of perfect love. Actually, the kind of love that makes people roll their eyes because they see it so seldom outside of Shakespeare. The thing is, they were so young that no one knows how that relationship would have played out once they grew up. But that is beside the point.

Hope the pretty boy's death was not in vain and some good comes from this film. I am sure it will/has had an impact.

by Anonymous

reply 16

11/03/2013

The deceased didn't die in vain...his widower has been on a steady diet of sympathy sex for the past year and a half!

by Anonymous

reply 17

11/03/2013

DL always houses sick fucks.

by Anonymous

reply 18

11/03/2013

I missed it. Is Oprah's channel going to repeat it ?

by Anonymous

reply 19

11/03/2013

Netflix R19, I'm watching it now.

by Anonymous

reply 20

11/04/2013

total cynic here-but cried my eyes out

by Anonymous

reply 21

11/04/2013

It was your typical cloying piece of Hallmark bullshit. At least the story didn't involve ugly people.

by Anonymous

reply 22

11/04/2013

I agree with R22. While I feel for the guy, the documentary came off as really self-serving.

I mean, I would have at least hoped they would get into the legal aspect of it all - what was possible at the time for gay couples to do, what hoops gays in CA would have to go through at the time to be "domestic partners". Even find other similar stories. But they seemed a little too self-absorbed to talk about the broader the issues their story represents.

by Anonymous

reply 23

11/04/2013

[quote]I mean, I would have at least hoped they would get into the legal aspect of it all - what was possible at the time for gay couples to do, what hoops gays in CA would have to go through at the time to be "domestic partners". Even find other similar stories. But they seemed a little too self-absorbed to talk about the broader the issues their story represents.

It's about his life with his partner. It's SUPPOSE TO BE SELF-SERVING! It's his personal story. What is wrong with you?

by Anonymous

reply 24

11/04/2013

r22 didn't even see it.

by Anonymous

reply 25

11/04/2013

I didn't see the movie. Did they register as domestic partners or no?

Also I found Tom Bridegroom's twitter which is still up. He LOVED his mother & the mother had visited them at least once when they were living together.

While I understand the guy's grief, people need to make arrangements early on in their relationships, especially if they're LGBT.

Questions that occurred to me are why did Tom continue a relationship with his parents/mother if they were 'phobes?

Why weren't better arrangements made beforehand, esp if they were together FIVE years?

by Anonymous

reply 26

11/04/2013

r26--how many of us made those "arrangements" in our 20's?

by Anonymous

reply 27

11/04/2013

[quote]It's about his life with his partner. It's SUPPOSE TO BE SELF-SERVING! It's his personal story. What is wrong with you?

But I'm still left with a sense of "so?". I mean, this would be a great People magazine story but I was kind of expecting something for Time magazine. An examination of the issue of a partner being left out in the cold by the deceased's family.

If anything, I'm glad he at least got this documentary out. That's one big, great "fuck you" to his boyfriend's family.

by Anonymous

reply 28

11/04/2013

Lots of people hate the person their child decides to love. Some people are homophobic, some people are racist, some people are snobs, etc. I'd guess that a version of what happened to this guy happens to people all over the world all the time for a whole host of reasons. Sad but I don't see what's so exceptional about this couple's story.

by Anonymous

reply 29

11/04/2013

I watched 20 minutes. Couldn't continue. Making the entire first 30 minutes or so about the fairly mundane childhood experiences of this gay dude, which are fairly typical of any gay child in middle America, was a deadly mistake.

Also, and I'm sorry, another sob story about perfect, plastic-looking white gay dudes just doesn't thrill me anymore. It just didn't seem fresh at all.

by Anonymous

reply 30

11/04/2013

Somehow their relationship seemed so contrived, so precious.

by Anonymous

reply 31

11/04/2013

Why did the deaf girl need "slutty pictures"?

by Anonymous

reply 32

11/04/2013

I find it a little hard to be sympathetic when someone dies so stupidly. From an accident that would normally be so easily avoidable. I just have to think that it was natural selection at work. You're right on the edge of the roof. Don't step off of it, otherwise you'll fall 4 stories. Got it? The guy wasn't too bright, now was he.

by Anonymous

reply 33

11/04/2013

Was he taking the pics at night? The background seemed to indicate that. Why be on a roof at night? Why be anywhere near a ledge?

by Anonymous

reply 34

11/04/2013

The movie upsets me, and not for the "right" reasons.

There are lessons to be learned from the Bridegroom tragedy, but gay marriage and legal rights are not it.

Most of the problems faced by Bridegroom's boyfriend after his death would have been solved had the couple gotten a domestic partnership in California, which was legal at the time, which would have given the boyfriend legal standing over Bridgeroom's estate and body.

The couple said they did not get a domestic partnership, because they wanted "real marriage".

The lesson is, if you want or need the legal rights, take the civil union or domestic partnership, don't wait until it's too late.

by Anonymous

reply 35

11/04/2013

I did not understand why the grave was marked as "Bridegroom."

by Anonymous

reply 36

11/04/2013

[quote]I did not understand why the grave was marked as "Bridegroom."

Because that's his last name.

Tom Bridegroom.

by Anonymous

reply 37

11/04/2013

They seemed to have plenty of money for travel and a decent lifestyle and they were pretty young. Were they very successful with the business they owned or were their families wealthy? A friend of Tom's mentioned that his mother took a job as a janitor to help with his tuition.

by Anonymous

reply 38

11/04/2013

Tom was a successful photographer with loads of contacts. Not sure what job the survivor has, does anyone know? Was Tom the one with the money, bought the condo, etc?

by Anonymous

reply 39

11/04/2013

Tom was friends with legendary Hollywood superstar Anne Hathaway?

by Anonymous

reply 40

11/04/2013

R2 = likes to shit on people

by Anonymous

reply 41

11/04/2013

[quote]Why did the deaf girl need "slutty pictures"?

What deaf girl doesn't?

by Anonymous

reply 42

11/05/2013

Tom wan't friends with AnnE, they just happened to go to the same college

by Anonymous

reply 43

11/05/2013

Being "friends" with a celebrity you have a minor connection to is the kind of stuff people like Tom would casually imply at a party.

by Anonymous

reply 44

11/05/2013

Tom was also college friends with Sasha Andreev. In the movie he's the one that says the there was an unspoken understanding between the two of them that Tom was gay.

I have an unspoken understanding that Sasha is gay too.

He's the only reason that I even skim the ShopNBC channel once in a great while. Sometimes he's demonstrating some electronic gadget, and I think I crush on him a little bit.

by Anonymous

reply 45

11/11/2013

I thought R37 was kidding. Apparently not.

by Anonymous

reply 46

11/23/2013

[quote] They seemed to have plenty of money for travel and a decent lifestyle and they were pretty young. Were they very successful with the business they owned or were their families wealthy? A friend of Tom's mentioned that his mother took a job as a janitor to help with his tuition.

In the documentary, one of the friends mentioned that Tom and Shane were frugal and saved up for their trips. Some people wait for certain travel deals to happen in order to travel overseas.

I don't think Shane's family was wealthy.

by Anonymous

reply 47

11/23/2013

It's out on Redbox now. Moving film.

by Anonymous

reply 48

12/18/2013

I was a Kickstarter backer and the DVD of the finished film that I was supposed to get finally arrived last week, a full two months after it began to be available on Netflix and for purchase. Kind of pissed about that.

I haven't quite been able to bring myself to actually watch it. Not because of my frustration with the Kickstarter organizers, but because I don't think I could handle that kind of raw emotion.

Mary McDonnell's show Major Crimes did an episode in its most recent season that featured a video like Shane's original one as a plot device--even though it was more about a man telling the world that he'd been molested by his coach--and even THAT was hard for me to watch.

by Anonymous

reply 49

12/18/2013

They list all of the Kickstarter names in the credits.

by Anonymous

reply 50

12/18/2013

I watched it last week. Heartbreaking.

by Anonymous

reply 51

12/18/2013

I didn't find emotional at all. The death was preventable and the Bridegroom family deserved to be humiliated for their actions, but I just found it matter of fact. Obviously the father was a homophobe and never accepted it, but the mother was more accepting but kowtowed to him after her son's death. I believe she blamed the boyfriend, even though he wasn't there, because Tom was away from the family because of Shane.

by Anonymous

reply 52

12/18/2013

I didn't like it as much as most of you. I Found their vanity off putting and had to keep reminding myself that they were young so it should be overlooked.

Do all young people now have hundreds of hours of video of themselves driving and singing and rambling on about stuff?

I heard an interview with Bloodworth-Thomason which was great and she seemed smart so I was really surprised at how overly sentimental this documentary ended up being.

by Anonymous

reply 53

12/18/2013

It was a vapid piece of shit. I expected a lot more...

by Anonymous

reply 54

12/18/2013

[quote]An examination of the issue of a partner being left out in the cold by the deceased's family.

You automatically get that by following the story.

by Anonymous

reply 55

12/22/2013

[quote]Most of the problems faced by Bridegroom's boyfriend after his death would have been solved had the couple gotten a domestic partnership in California, which was legal at the time

So everyone is suppose to have a crystal ball and foresee the future? Give me a break. Do heteros do that before getting married? No.

by Anonymous

reply 56

12/22/2013

I saw this at Redbox today. I was immediately drawn to the cover art and thought it was a new gay movie. When I saw it was a documentary I rented We're the Millers instead.

by Anonymous

reply 57

12/22/2013

They never seemed like a couple. I know it was due to one of them being afraid of PDA but it kinda sinked the film.

by Anonymous

reply 58

12/22/2013

How'd he fall? Was he drunk?

by Anonymous

reply 59

01/25/2014

A month or so ago, i heard some fundies were threatening to boycott Redbox for featuring "Bridegroom the Movie", and making it too available to Christian youth.

Of course, it was never mentioned on this gay website.

by Anonymous

reply 60

01/26/2014

Some of you are gross. This movie is about love and tragedy. The fact that some of you cunts would trivialize the death and grief of a young gay couple is disheartening. Instead of creaming in your pants over Gale Harold why don't you watch this movie and not pick apart every fucking detail.

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