Cling to Your Guns and Your Penis

Washington D.C. is in an uproar. District police are looking for two people in connection with an attack on a transgendered woman who was shot on Eastern Avenue last week. Tragically, the former man who is now a woman was approached by two gun wielding men who are still men. The present men assaulted the former man and then shot at her (previously him) as she (previously he) tried to run away.

The victim was treated at a local hospital; the men who are still men were seen fleeing the scene in a grey four-door sedan with the front driver’s side hubcap missing. The first subject is described as a black male (at least currently), who is about 5’10″, and has a dark complexion. In other words, he’s both black and dark.

The second suspect is described by police as “a black male,” who is about 6′ tall, and is “heavy-set, with a medium-brown complexion.” Police also released a video of the suspects they are seeking so people can watch for themselves and determine which of the police descriptions – “black” or “medium brown” – is the most accurate.

Anyone who has knowledge of this case, knows the identity of the persons of interest, or needs some clarification of the exact difference between “black” and “medium brown” should immediately call police at 202-727-9099 or simply text message 50411.

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