Whatever 8.1

SIMON COWELL is expecting a child with a 36-year-old woman, who happens to be the estranged wife of a good friend of his.They're divorcing, but the timeline is unclear at this point.We don't know if Simon's relationship with the woman ended the marriage.And even if it didn't, we don't know if the guy is okay with Simon dating his ex.The woman is reportedly about 10 weeks along.

Harry From One Direction Says He's Only Had Sex With Two Women

Everywhere the guys in ONE DIRECTION go, they're confronted by screaming females . . . many of whom ARE old enough to fornicate.So you'd think these guys' numbers would all be through the roof at this point.

But that's not necessarily the case.HARRY STYLES was asked for his count, and he said, quote, "It's definitely less than 100 . . . Yes, lower than 50."

Then he added, quote, "Two people.I've only ever had sex with two people.That's my answer.Read from it what you will!"(He may have been joking.And this was a print interview, so we don't have the tone of his voice to clue us in.)

Kerry Washington(They listed her first, so we're assuming she's the big dog this year.But it's Princess Diana who appears on the cover of the issue.)

Justin Timberlake

Kate Middleton(Last year's cover girl.This is her fourth time on the list.)

Keith Richards

Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady

LeBron James

Beyoncé

Brooke Shields

Charlize Theron

Lindsay Lohan Has to Attend Three Therapy Sessions a Week

LINDSAY LOHAN'S judge ordered her to attend three therapy sessions per week for the next 15 months, in order to make sure she stays clean.This was actually recommended by the clinic where Lindsay just spent 90 days.They said that to do otherwise would be, quote, "a set up for almost certain failure."

O.J. Simpson Was Granted Parole . . . In Part Because He Had No Prior Convictions

O.J. SIMPSON was granted parole on some of the charges he's serving time for.He still has to spend at least four years behind bars before he can be released.The parole board said it was granting his request because of his, quote, "positive institutional conduct, participation in programs [and] LACK OF PRIOR CONVICTION HISTORY."

Thursday TV Reminders:

• "2013 Young Hollywood Awards" . . . 8:00 to 10:00 P.M. on the CW.Kit Harington, who plays Jon Snow on "Game of Thrones", is among the talent being honored this year.Check out a list of the honorees they've announced so far here.

• "Hatfields & McCoys: White Lightning" [Series Premiere] . . . 10:00 to 11:00 P.M. on the History Channel.The two feuding families try to put aside their hateful history to enter into a new business together selling Hatfield & McCoy Moonshine.

A Rare Condition Makes a Guy in Canada Feel Orgasmic When He Hears the "James Bond" Music

There's a 45-year-old guy in Toronto with a rare condition called synesthesia from having a stroke six years ago.With synesthesia, one stimulation triggers another unrelated area of your brain.So for this guy, when he hears the "James Bond" theme, he feels, quote, "ORGASMIC."

The Most Romantic Thing You Can Do on a Date Is . . . Plan a Surprise Activity

A new survey asked men and women which gender is MORE ROMANTIC . . . and 81% of women and 69% of men say WOMEN are more romantic.And the most romantic thing someone can do on a date is . . . plan a surprise activity.

10% of People Have Gotten Nude in Public When They Were Drunk . . . and 6% Have Wet the Bed

In a new survey, 67% of people say they've gone into work hungover . . . 50% have gone into work still a little DRUNK . . . 20% have sexted someone they shouldn't have when they were drunk . . . 10% have gotten nude in public when they were drunk . . . and 6% have drunkenly WET THE BED.

67% of people have gone into work hungover.

50% have gone into work when they were still a little DRUNK.

50% have THROWN UP from drinking alcohol.

33% think the best way to beat hangovers is to HAVE SEX.

20% have sexted someone they shouldn't have when they were drunk.

10% got NAKED IN PUBLIC when they were drunk.

10% have posted something stupid on Facebook when they were drunk.

10% have had to go to the HOSPITAL for alcohol poisoning.

And finally, 6% of GROWN UPS have WET THE BED when they were drunk.(Daily Mail)

A Study Finds You Suffer Your Worst Hangovers at Age 29, and Hangovers Hurt the Worst at 9:45 A.M

According to a new study out of England, the age when people suffer the WORST hangovers is . . . 29.That's because you still TRY to drink like when you were younger . . . like pounding cheap alcohol . . . but your body can't handle it anymore.The study also found the average hangover lasts nine hours and 45 minutes, and the hangover PAIN peaks at 9:45 A.M.

A Woman Named Amelia Earhart Is Recreating the Same Flight the Original Amelia Earhart Took

There's a woman named Amelia Earhart who does the weather for NBC in Denver . . . and her hobby is flying.So next year, she's planning to RECREATE the flight the original AMELIA EARHART attempted around the world . . . the one where she DISAPPEARED over the Pacific Ocean in 1937.But the modern Amelia will have a much more sophisticated plane.

A Man Tried to Smuggle His Pet Turtle Through Airport Security . . . by Hiding It in a Sandwich from KFC

On Monday, a guy in China was stopped at the airport for trying to smuggle his pet TURTLE through security . . . by hiding it in a sandwich from KFC. Officials became suspicious when the man showed them his KFC bag and said there was, quote, "no turtle in there, just a hamburger."

Jason Momoa - 34(The new Conan the Barbarian!!!He was also Khal Drogo on HBO's "Game of Thrones", and the dreadlock-wearing warrior Ronon on "Stargate Atlantis".Lisa Bonet has two kids with him.)

TEMPESTT BLEDSOE!!! - 40(Vanessa Huxtable on "The Cosby Show" . . . AND host of the fine daytime talk show formerly known as "Tempestt".)(She was also in that "Househusbands of Hollywood" show that aired on the Fox Reality Channel.)

Sam Mendes - 48(Chubby-chasing director of "American Beauty", "Road To Perdition" and "Jarhead".He USED TO make sweet love to Kate Winslet anytime he wanted to.Why he would give that up I have no idea.)

Adam Duritz - 49(Lead singer of Counting Crows.He used to nail both Courteney Cox AND Jennifer Aniston, though not at the same time.)

Coolio - 50

Demian Bichir - 50(Detective Marco Ruiz on FX's "The Bridge".You might also remember him as the corrupt Mexican politician, Esteban Reyes, from "Weeds".

32 years ago . . . in 1981 - MTV was launched in an estimated 2 million homes at 12:01 A.M.It started off with the words, "Ladies and gentleman, rock and roll."The first video shown was "Video Killed The Radio Star", by THE BUGGLES.

27 years ago . . . in 1986 - The fine piece of classic cinema known as "Howard The Duck" was released.It was produced by Lucasfilm but, for some reason, GEORGE LUCAS doesn't like to talk about that.

19 years ago . . . in 1994- MICHAEL JACKSON and LISA MARIE PRESLEY confirmed they had secretly wed 11 weeks earlier.Their freakish marriage was over by January of 1996.

17 years ago . . . in 1996 - MTV launched MTV2.It was weak-sauce in its early years, but is now far superior to the original MTV because it actually, sometimes, plays videos.

8 years ago . . . in 2005 - RAFAEL PALMEIRO was suspended from the Baltimore Orioles for 10 days after testing positive for steroids.He'd been mentioned by name as a steroid user in Jose Canseco's tell-all book "Juiced".

One year ago . . . in2012- Eight women's badminton players were disqualified from the Summer Olympics for trying to lose matches on purpose.

10 Year Flashback:Sandra Bullock Is Done With Her 22-Year-Old Boy-Toy . . . and Flash-Forward to Today's Perspective on Ryan Gosling

Our Flashback section features a story we were talking about on The Complete Sheet 10 years ago to this day.We've also added some modern perspective to give these stories some context today.

Flashback to 2003:Sandra Bullock Is Done With Her 22-Year-Old Boy-Toy

Bad news for SANDRA BULLOCK'S love life . . . and for her LUST for YOUNGER MEN.

38-year-old Sandra started dating some 22-YEAR-OLD actor named RYAN GOSLING about two years ago. . . after they met on the set of "Murder By Numbers".In case your math skills are lacking, there's a 16-year age differential there.

But I guess it doesn't matter anymore anyway."Us Weekly" says Sandra and Ryan broke up two months ago, but remain friends.