Is there a Buddhist way of meeting social situations such as being called upon to say grace? Is there a non-denominational blessing that a Buddhist could use that would be appropriate to the occasion and at the same time honor the Dharma?

A similar example might be being expected to pray at weddings or funerals. Is it okay to recite, say, the Lord's Prayer in order to show solidarity with the celebrators and/or the mourners? Or is a bowed head and silent lips the preferred course?

I would personally join in the spirit of the prayer or grace. If you're uncomfortable saying words, then don't say them It's better than doing the motions while hypocritically lacking a spirit of love or gratitude. If you are comfortable saying the words, then I personally see it as another part of our unending practice. We practice love by saying silly things to our children or spouses, or by making small talk to put someone at ease. So any specific concept or word is just a tool for this, unless you think it might bring suffering to others somehow.

Specifically for grace, if you're called on to do it and people know it will be non-denominational, keep it simple Since ideally giving gratitude is good practice before any meal, there's lots of time to find something that works for you. When I'm by myself, I use a Kagyu prayer that resembles taking refuge but would be fairly opaque to non-practitioners:The unsurpassed teacher is the precious Buddha; the unsurpassed protector is the precious Dharma; the unsurpassed refuge is the precious Sangha. To these three jewels, I make this offering.

Off the top of my head, a totally secular, non-denominational grace may resemble:We are grateful for this meal. It is the gift of much hard work, countless people, and the earth and sky. May we stay in the present moment with each other and this food, so we don't miss this precious opportunity to eat together. May everyone be happy and meet with success in all things, and through this meal, may we in some way learn to be gentler, kinder people.

It's really up to you. I haven't been put in that situation yet, so good luck! Intention is more important than form, I think. HHDL has attended Catholic services and participated fully, as I recall.

steveb1 wrote:Is there a Buddhist way of meeting social situations such as being called upon to say grace? Is there a non-denominational blessing that a Buddhist could use that would be appropriate to the occasion and at the same time honor the Dharma?

"We acknowledge all the inconceivable circumstances that were required to bring this food to our table. May it nourish our body, mind, and spirit, and may all beings share in the wealth of this offering. May all beings' virtuous desires manifest simultaneously with unconditional bliss. Amen."

steveb1 wrote:A similar example might be being expected to pray at weddings or funerals. Is it okay to recite, say, the Lord's Prayer in order to show solidarity with the celebrators and/or the mourners?

Sure, why not? If you practice Mahayana, or especially Vajrayana, everything in the Lord's prayer can be construed as Buddhist.

This food is the gift of the entire universeeach morsel is a sacrifice of lifemay I be worthy to receive it.May the energy in this foodbring me strengthto transform my unwholesome qualitiesinto wholesome ones.(leave out the following:) I am grateful for this food,may I realize the path of awakening for the sake of all beings.

"All memories and thoughts are the union of emptiness and knowing, the Mind.Without attachment, self-liberating, like a snake in a knot.Through the qualities of meditating in that way,Mental obscurations are purified and the dharmakaya is attained."

steveb1 wrote:Is there a Buddhist way of meeting social situations such as being called upon to say grace? Is there a non-denominational blessing that a Buddhist could use that would be appropriate to the occasion and at the same time honor the Dharma?

A similar example might be being expected to pray at weddings or funerals. Is it okay to recite, say, the Lord's Prayer in order to show solidarity with the celebrators and/or the mourners? Or is a bowed head and silent lips the preferred course?

In Chinese Buddhism, there are the "Five Mealtime Contemplations". If I may just cut-and-paste (trs. my own):

A similar example might be being expected to pray at weddings or funerals. Is it okay to recite, say, the Lord's Prayer in order to show solidarity with the celebrators and/or the mourners? Or is a bowed head and silent lips the preferred course?

Some of my favs...For funerals:From the here, here and one format"All conditioned things are impermanent" — when one sees this with wisdom, one turns away from suffering. This is the path to purification."All conditioned things are unsatisfactory" — when one sees this with wisdom, one turns away from suffering. This is the path to purification."All things are not-self" — when one sees this with wisdom, one turns away from suffering. This is the path to purification.

Behold this body — a painted image, a mass of heaped up sores, infirm, full of hankering — of which nothing is lasting or stable!Fully worn out is this body, a nest of disease, and fragile. This foul mass breaks up, for death is the end of life.These dove-colored bones are like gourds that lie scattered about in autumn. Having seen them, how can one seek delight?This city (body) is built of bones, plastered with flesh and blood; within are decay and death, pride and jealousy.Even gorgeous royal chariots wear out, and indeed this body too wears out. But the Dhamma of the Good does not age; thus the Good make it known to the good.

Just as a mighty mountain range,Scraping the sky with rocky crags,Might advance from four directions,Crushing everything before it —

So also do old age and deathRoll over all living beings.

Nobles, brahmans and working folk,Peasants, outcastes and garbage men —None of them can escape [this end]:Everybody surely gets crushed.

Nothing on earth can defeat them:Not elephants, chariots or troops;Nor the use of a magic spell;Nor [can you buy safety] with gold.

So the person who's firm and wise,Seeing what is best for themselves,Will place their faith in the Buddha,The Dhamma and the Sangha too.

One who practices the teaching,With body and speech and with mind —That one is praised here in this world,And after enjoys the pure realms.

http://www.cttbusa.org/42s/42sections.aspSection 38 Birth Leads to DeathThe Buddha asked a Shramana, "How long is the human life span?" He replied, "A few days." The Buddha said, "You have not yet understood the Way." He asked another Shramana, "How long is the human life span?" The reply was, "The space of a meal." The Buddha said, "You have not yet understood the Way."He asked another Shramana, "How long is the human life span?" He replied, "The length of a single breath." The Buddha said, "Excellent. You have understood the Way."

http://www.diamond-sutra.com/diamond_su ... age32.htmlThis is how to contemplate our conditioned existence in this fleeting world:" "Like a tiny drop of dew, or a bubble floating in a stream; Like a flash of lightning in a summer cloud, Or a flickering lamp, an illusion, a phantom, or a dream." "So is all conditioned existence to be seen."

While you're busy being distracted, the demon of Death will catch you;People of Tingri, practice from this very moment onwards.

When will the demon of Death appear? There is no easy way to tell;People of Tingri, right now be always on your guard.

The day you die, there's no one who'll protect you;People of Tingri, be ready to have yourselves alone to count on.

If you reflect on death, there's nothing you will need;People of Tingri, always keep your death in mind.

Your flesh and bones took form together, but in the end are sure to separate;People of Tingri, do not believe that you will live forever

Seek for that most sublime of progeny, the young child pure awareness,People of Tingri, for which there is no birth or death

With its freedoms and advantages, human life is like a treasure island;People of Tingri, do not come back an empty-handed failure.

If you aspire to happiness in future, accept your present trials;People of Tingri - then Buddhahood is right here just beside you.

On marriages/weddings:

http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .nara.html"In five ways, young householder, should a wife as the West be ministered to by a husband:(i) by being courteous to her,(ii) by not despising her,(iii) by being faithful to her,(iv) by handing over authority to her,(v) by providing her with adornments.

"The wife thus ministered to as the West by her husband shows her compassion to her husband in five ways:(i) she performs her duties well,(ii) she is hospitable to relations and attendants(iii) she is faithful,(iv) she protects what he brings,(v) she is skilled and industrious in discharging her duties.

http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .than.html"If both husband & wife want to see one another not only in the present life but also in the life to come, they should be in tune [with each other] in conviction, in tune in virtue, in tune in generosity, and in tune in discernment. Then they will see one another not only in the present life but also in the life to come."

Husband & wife, both of them having conviction, being responsive, being restrained, living by the Dhamma, addressing each other with loving words:they benefit in manifold ways. To them comes bliss.Their enemies are dejected when both are in tune in virtue.Having followed the Dhamma here in this world, both in tune in precepts & practices,they delight in the world of the devas,enjoying the pleasures they desire.