Kanye West VMA Vanguard Speech

...I was in my room having romantic thoughts of screwing my past ex-girlfriends and my penis was about to meet my beloved Palmela...but suddenly, my Mom (sh*t) interrupts —'Your Dad wants to know...wants you to explain who this crazy black man is on the MTV (awards) show!' [Spoken/Translated from Chinese (Mandarin)]I had already guessed it was Kanye West...who else is a prima-donna on the national stage...I told my Dad, "You know him — it's the black guy who makes G.O.O.D. black music for other people...he doesn't sing or dance...he makes music (produces) for other people!"

My Dad replies,'Why is (he crazy?)...he can't talk good...he keep making mistakes...he speaking long time...he talk long time on stage...'I replied, "They (MTV) give him special trophy and he just talkin' crazy sh*t because he's always angry like Rev. Sharpton...he's just talkin' bullsh*t to look like a leader for black people but he doesn't know what he's talkin' about — he just want to be famous!"Both my parents still don't know who Kanye West is but after I told them he's married to the RICH BIG-BUTT GIRL (Kim Kardashian) who's father is the 'half-man/half-woman' (Bruce Jenner) Olympic guy — they both sighed, 'OHHHhhh-hh!'

After all that's said and done, they still both didn't know or what Kanye West is...but my Dad goes, 'Yeah, he crazy he smoke before speaking..."