4 Ways To Get The Girl – and Get Her To Like You

by Carlos_ Xuma · Published October 27, 2015 · Updated December 8, 2015

Let’s face it – when you see a girl you want to win, you know you’ve got to get her liking you right away.

If she starts out thinking of you as a friend, you’re doomed.

It is possible to break out of that friends zone, but you shouldn’t let yourself get put there in the first place.

It’s like having to start a football game with a penalty in the first few seconds. You’re going to be behind from the very beginning.

Why let that handicap mess up your game when you can avoid it?

So if you’ve got your eye on her, I want to help you get the girl.

And get her fully wanting you back.

Here are a few tips – a few ways to get the girl liking you right from the first time you meet her:

Win The Girl – Tip 1: Listen to her until she squirms

One of the things I do that works so well to make women respond to me sexually is that I do something that I call OVER-listening.

I ask a woman a question, and then I listen to her answer. REALLY listen.

If she hesitates or fumbles, I’m there to ask another question to help keep her going. At a certain point, she’ll reach critical mass and sustain the whole thing.

At some point, she’s going to get self-conscious about how much she’s been talking. She’ll say something like: “OK, and now I think I’m just talking too much.” (Nervous laughter.)

That’s when I just smile and nod. Because I’ll know that I’ve successfully OVER listened to her.

And then I’ll keep doing that over and over. Because each time, she’ll be convincing herself that there’s something different about our conversation.

“No one ever listens this much…”

“I wonder what he’s thinking about me?”

Self-consciousness can be a good thing, because that means she’s switched her attention – putting her focus on justifying the attention.

She’s going to think of you as the only guy that’s paid any attention to her like this.

She’ll still check in every so often to make sure she isn’t spending too much time talking, but you just reassure her and let her talk herself into you.

When You Want To Win The Girl – Tip 2: Win her friends

Now, this may not be intuitive for most guys, because once we’ve set our targets on a girl, the only thing we see is her from the vary beginning.

Unfortunately, if you stop paying attention to her friends, you’re going to lose a valuable opportunity.

You see, women are competitive. Not like guys are competitive, though.

Men like to compete head-to-head, and see who comes out the victor. It’s in our DNA.

Girls, on the other hand like to compete for men – and attention. BUT they never want to be seen as competing.

So when you make friends with her friends you’re killing two birds with one stone. You’re making them your allies – and you’ll want them on your side later on.

Because your girl will be asking them about what they think.

Not to mention that you don’t want her friends “slut shaming” her later. You want them as allies.

But you’ll also be making her friends into competition for the girl you want. Your girl will perceive any woman that likes you as potentially a threat to you.

Which means she’ll work harder now to win you over.

Just be careful you don’t make it too obvious on your part that you’re flirting or trying to win them over, because the girl you want might give you grief over it. Be subtle and smooth about it.

Get the girl – Tip 3: The Old Push – Pull

A lot of guys have experienced this from his side of talking to a girl.

If a woman seems like she’s sending “mixed messages,” or acting “hot & cold,” or there’s a strange push-me/pull-you dance going on, it’s not that she’s being weird or manipulative – at least not usually.

Women try to express interest from a DEFENSIVE posture.

Read that again – it’s important…

Women try to express sexual interest in men from a defensive position. This allows her to pay attention to her built-in threat detection mechanism.

This strange little contraption in her brain lets her avoid guys that push too hard.

And that’s what women do when you’re pushing too hard, they pull into their little turtle shell for safety. That’s when you feel her going a bit cold.

Maybe you really are a “nice” guy who won’t take advantage of her, but she doesn’t really have any way of knowing that when she first meets you.

She has to evaluate you firsthand – through her own senses.

The way to avoid this kind of frustrating dance with her is for YOU to do it first.

Yep, just like real dancing, girl’s are always more attracted to you when YOU take the lead. Instead of pushing until she retreats, you should be retreating on occasion to get her to reach out and pull you back in.

Which she will, if she’s at least partially interested in you.

If you want her to like you – Tip 4: Keep her beauty in the background

Here’s the deal – Most women from teenage years to her late maturity have been hit on quite a bit. A TON, in fact.

Most nice guys, on the other hand, are intimidated by beauty and won’t risk it.

So what she gets is a higher-than-normal percentage of losers constantly coming on to her and making her feel like a side of beef hung up in a meat (meet?) locker. She gets guys who CONSTANTLY tell her she’s beautiful, etc.

Mostly because these no-talent numbskulls really think they’re complimenting her by noting the obvious.

Most girls are mystified as to what men are really attracted to in her beyond her possession of a vagina, so she’s got a bit of a clueless streak when it comes to her own physical attractiveness.

The best thing you can do as a man is to reinforce her positive image of herself instead.

Ask her what she thinks her strongest quality is. Listen to her until it hurts, then listen some more.

(Remember? Over-listen.)

When she tells you, you remember this.

And then find a place later in the conversation to compliment her on it.

If it’s her compassion, then you get her to tell her about her friends, and I’ll guarantee there will be a story where she was compassionate.

Then you just say: “Wow – you’re right, you are a very compassionate person.”

When you use a girl’s appearance as the only yardstick to evaluate her worth, she’s going to feel objectified and shallow.

But if you focus your insights on those things that are not readily visible, you’ll have a much better chance of impressing her – and getting her to take you home.

If you want to get the girl, you gotta play it strategically – especially if you want to win her heart.

And remember: She lives in a competitive mating market with a limited number of attractive, desirable guys. These are the men that all the women want, and that women are going to compete against each other to win – and keep.

Guys don’t realize what kind of a scarcity market it is for girls out there. All she sees are flabby, dorky, socially clueless horn-dogs at every turn.

Most of these guys are trying pickup artist tricks on her that she can see coming a mile away.

If you want to get the girl – you need to grab her attention, and then keep it.

And if you want to know how to get her to feel primal sexual desire for you, you should know that every woman has a “Lust Response” built into her psychology.

It’s hard wired and completely automatic – IF you know how to trigger it…