The Most Ridiculous Questions I have heard in my Gay life

I don’t care if you fancy women as long as you don’t fancy me.

This is how one woman introduced herself to me once. As I stared at her one tooth, I attempted to acclimatise to the…’oh you think I fancy everyone’. I twisted my gob smacked face into a smile and explained I don’t fancy everyone and there is a requirement to have a full set of teeth. She didn’t speak to me after that…I held back the tears.

What is your boyfriends name

Amy

That’s an unusual name for a man

It’s all good we are all human and we all can make a mistake. But this is plain awkward & humiliating, when your partner is quite clearly a she.

Who wears the trousers?

Say what now..why have people continually force others into the constraints of society. I normally continually say I don’t understand the question until the questioner breaks and is then questioning the whole point of society.. I WIN

What do you do in bed?

This is a question asked by males and females. My staple reply is I am not that bothered about what happens in your bed so why do you care about mine?

I can turn you straight

Really, really I am going out with the hottest woman in the world so why would I want to be straight and also be turned straight by a person that I am not attracted to!

When did you find out you were a lesbian?

When did you find out you were straight? Usually gives a stunned silence.

I really don’t mind people asking me questions about my lifestyle but when these questions are wrapped up in homophobia..it’s not cool!