An unaccompanied haggis dressed in a tartan pink kilt caused a major security scare in January after turning up at Inverness train station unannounced.

The 4ft papier-mache model, which had label attached that read ‘this haggis needs friends’, travelled 114miles to its final destination where it was met by British Transport Police officials who escorted it off the premises.

A Brazilian man was arrested after being caught attempting to open a bank account using a photograph of famous Hollywood actor Jack Nicholson on a false ID.

It was a case of ‘as stupid as it gets’ for the alleged fraudster who used one of the world’s most recognisable faces in an attempt to fool bank staff before they notified police officials about the chancer’s preposterous plan.

A three-year-old frozen chicken nugget bearing a slight resemblance to first US president George Washington attracted over 70 bids on eBay after a bidding war between patriotic Americans earlier this year.

The presidential poultry eventually attracted an offer of £5,000 before the highest bidder chickened out of the deal to own their very own chunk of American history.

Flat-pack furniture fans received a shock after spotting a dapper monkey dressed in a fur coat walking aimlessly around an Ikea car park in Toronto, Canada.

The internet sensation, named Darwin, escaped from his owner’s parked vehicle before being moved to an animal sanctuary, while his previous owners were fined for breaking a law on keeping prohibited animals.

A well-meaning pensioner became an overnight internet sensation after transforming a cherished 200-year-old Jesus Christ fresco painting hanging in a Zaragoza church into a ‘monkey in an ill-fitting tunic’.

Light-fingered Lemur Beats The Rain With Umbrella Rain didn’t stop play for this cheeky black-and-white-ruffed lemur at Dudley Zoological Gardens

Only Fools and Horses fall guy Rodney Trotter is being used in a bizarre political campaign to show up a mayoral election candidate as a right plonker. Pictures of actor Nicholas Lindhurst

BARELY LEGAL This cheeky cyclist gave police a good look at his credentials – after he was flashed by a speed camera in Poland. Traffic cops in Bialy Bor went to arrest the rider

DAFFY TRUCK It’s the kind of traffic jam that could drive even the most patient trucker quackers – when hundreds of ducks were herded along a four lane 70 mph

Sex doll for speed control in China. Frustrated Lin Chen was fed-up of waiting for police to nick speeding drivers outside her home in eastern China – and turned to the long arm of the phwoar instead. Chen, 67, bought a blow up sex doll and dressed in sexy red undies to make

Babe the orphaned piglet is looking forward to a bright future after being taken under the wing of his own mother GOOSE.

This amazing photograph detailing the incredible story of a lioness nurturing an orphaned kop a

Panda looks longingly at the cake (Picture: Rex)

This polar bear looks more human than you right now, what with his smiling and waving (Picture: Rex)

This amazing acrobatic display is an everyday occurrence for this goat and pony. Catkin, an eight-year-old Toggenburg goat amazed her owner Karen Newman when she jumped onto the back of Shetland pony Henry – but now Karen’s not fazed by the feat.

Ears pricked, these three little bear cubs stand on the lookout for danger…Even as they play together in the wilds of Finland, they are aware that at any moment a male bear could emerge from the woods to attack them…

This cheeky monkey may only be weeks old but he wasn’t shy when confronted with a camera lens. The confident youngster stuck out his tongue at Brit photographer Andrew Forsyth as he approached to take pictures…Mr Forsyth, from Brighton, East Sussex, said the baby was safe in the arms of his mother, a dominant female in the group of

Sage and Onion two of Sue Christy’s rescued battery hens that she has dressed in knitted jumpers because many of them have lost their feathers

Cheese: A seal waves for the camera (Picture: SWNS)

What a plonker: The fake Rodney Trotter ID card (Picture: SWNS)

What is believed to be the first ever town-centre sheep racing competition in Scotland was held today Sheep Racing Competition, Dumfriesshire, Scotland, Britain – 12 Aug 2012 Moffat staged the event on the high street in what organisers hope will become an annual competition.

Meet Spangles, the cutest cat in town (Picture: Mary Buchanan/Rex)

Brown bear (female) and its children play with a ball on April 19, 2012 in Kamchatka Peninsula, Russia.

MUGS BUNNY Baffled 999 cops called to challenge a prowler with a “striking face” found themselves nicking a 6ft rubber statue of the Easter Bunny left outside a house

The chilled out polar bear) – This polar bear certainly looks CHILLED OUT as he kicks back on an ice cap at sunset. Laid out on his back,

Cat In A Hat: Cool Clothes For Cats Is there anything cooler than a cat in a hat?

The orangutan is not impressed) – This is the hilarious moment a grumpy orangutan decided to get a bit of peace and quiet – by sticking his fingers in his ears. After playing up for excited zoo visitors calling out his name and taking pictures, the tired ape decided enough was enough and went for a rest. But with the noise still so loud calling desperately for him to come back he ended up putting his fingers into his ears to drown out the noise just like a human would. And it certainly seemed to work – as visitors at Surabaya Zoo in Indonesia eventually got bored waiting for him and moved on to the next animal to look at.

An abandoned duckling whose mother was killed by a fox has been given a new lease of life after being “adopted” by a Labrador. Dennis the baby duck

These meerkats were a funny sight when they stacked themselves on top of each other in a bid to keep warm during a cold evening. The cute creatures were caught on camera by photographer Ben Sadd in the Kuruman River Reserve, South Africa…The 25-year-old, who lives in Dorset, said: “Meerkats sometimes bundle up in the evenings.

Pub landlord Colin Flitter is turning heads with his double-decker bus – which he’s transformed into a mobile English inn. The 41-year-old bought the classic 1966 red Routemaster from eBay for 18,500 and spent 14,000 pounds turning it in to the aptly named Hop On Inn…The lower deck has been converted into a fully functional bar – complete with beer pumps.

Ken Dobson from Swindon with the face of ET which he found inside a piece of firewood.