‘Filthy’ texts bared in drunk fallout

MARRIED At First Sight's cheaters have come under siege, with the group slaughtering them at a drunken dinner party and one of the jilted partners exposing the "filthy, sexual" texts that were sent.

The fallout of Dean and Davina's affair continues on Wednesday night's episode as all the couples gather for a late-night, champagne-fuelled dinner party. It's the first time they've all come together since news of the fling rocked the experiment at Sunday night's commitment ceremony. And while Dean and Davina would like everything to be forgotten, there are others in the group who demand answers.

Carly's rocked up to the party alone because Justin is still driving an ice-cream van around Italy. She's devastated and embarrassed, but just as we're about to go over and comfort her, Davina brings up Dean and, sorry Carly, but the affair takes priority over you and the Dairy Queen.

"Guys, he is a smooth talker. That guy had me hook, line and sinker," Davina tells us, trying to make Dean the only villain in this narrative. "I was risking my whole time on here for something I thought was real. I just can't believe he can get away with it."

Davina's got a plan. She wants to convince us that it was all Dean's fault and she was just an innocent victim. But we're smarter than that and every time she talks to us, we pretend to listen but secretly judge her.

‘Tell me more.’

Meanwhile, it's all water under the bridge for Ryan and Dean.

"Hey Ryan, how are ya bro?" Dean asks, holding out his hand.

"F*ck off," Ryan replies.

The snub angers Dean and, over dinner, he tries to tell everyone that Ryan is actually the one responsible for the whole affair.

"We had a private conversation and Ryan told me that Davina liked me and he has no problem with her pursuing me. And he actually encouraged me to hook up with her," he says.

We all turn to Dean and give him this look.

‘Sure Jan.’

Dean's refusal to take responsibility and his attempts to blame everyone but himself anger the village. Smack talk starts getting thrown around.

Ryan adds some flair to his insult with alliteration and dubs him "D**khead Dean".

Nasser gets so riled his perm starts to frizz and he almost develops fine lines and wrinkles.

‘This is why I use Olay Regenerist.’

Davina thinks her plan is a success. She's turned the room against Dean and everyone's forgotten she was even involved in the affair. She celebrates by drinking all the wine.

Um OK.

But if she thinks she's going to escape this evening unscathed, she's bitterly mistaken. Tracey thought she could get through tonight without a confrontation. But Davina's lack of regret or remorse leaves he wanting to flip a table.

"I'm gonna call her on it," Tracey tells us.

Get em gurl.

Tracey tells the other ladies how Davina instigated the affair. And she reveals their text messages contained a lot more eggplant emojis than what producers showed us last week.

"She was sending filthy, sexual text messages to Dean. But he was doing it back," she tells us. "It was hard reading those f*cking texts. And it was both ways, let me tell ya."

We start to feel sorry for Tracey but then she starts jolting her neck and saying her "hit it and quit it" catchphrase again and we immediately lose our sympathy.

Tracey works herself up into a spin and decides to go drag Davina. But just as she's about to pull her hair, Dean stands up to make a toast.

Wot.

"I just wanna say Tracey, I'm so sorry for what I did," he says as we all look stunned. "I'm very, very sorry. In front of everyone, I'm trying to make it up to you. I hope everyone can respect that."

We then start heckling him.

"F*ck off!" Ryan yells.

Dean's fed up. He's sick of being painted as the villain, even though he is. He starts over-explaining the affair again and throws the blame on Davina. He tells everyone it was all her.

We all immediately light our torches and run down to Davina at the end of the table.

She tries to play it down.

"It wasn't like, 'Hey I wanna suck your d*ck," she says as we screw up our faces, confused about why she thought that was the best thing to say right now.

Things are messy and we're all so overwhelmed we start to turn on each other. Nasser begins chanting, "Leave the prick!" and then Tracey accuses him of judging her.

The night has fallen into mayhem and everyone has lost sight of what we're here for - to see a fight between Tracey and Davina. We need Tracey to not lose focus. We pull her away from Nasser and grab her by the shoulders. Immediately, she snaps out of it and recalibrates. We shove her in the general direction of Davina.

"We need to talk. Can we do that now?" she slurs. They slump off into a quiet room so we can hear better.

To Tracey's face, Davina attempts to make herself seem like the victim. It doesn't go over well. They then employ my favourite passive aggressive move to use in an argument and begin every sentence with the word "honey".

As tears roll down Davina's face, she tries to explain the emotional depth of her affair with Dean.

"He talked about my DOG!" she sobs.

Tracey returns to the dining room even more infuriated. All she wanted was an apology and she didn't come close.

"I'm gobsmacked," she says.

Davina has a very different take on the chat.

"I'm just proud I stayed strong," she says.

She then gives us a catchphrase that rivals Tracey's "hit it and quit it".

"I'm never gonna change me," she says stoically with a flick of her hair. I'm using this next time my editor asks why I'm late.

It's after midnight and the champagne has gone flat. So much has been said and yet there are still so many questions that need to be answered. We just don't have the energy to ask them.

In a moment of clarity, Ashley addresses perhaps the biggest problem of this whole affair.

"I don't understand. Out of all the guys, why Dean? He's not even hot," she exhales.

We glance around the table. Everyone stares blankly. And suddenly, things are in perspective.

For more observations on Olay Regenerist and the iconic Jennifer Lopez/Puff Daddy relationship, follow me on Twitter: @hellojamesweir