Sunday, March 25, 2012

I am obsessed with Vengeance! Yes I am! No more soap dramas like Neighbours...but Vengeance!

Okay before you tink I am craa-azy, I am actually referring to the starz drama Spartacus: Vengeance.

I actually followed through the storylines right from the first series which is Spartacus: Blood and Sand and was sad of the demise of the late actor Andy Whitfield who was in the titular role. I even knew they replaced with a new guy.

I tend to read the recaps so I somehow got the gist of what was going on and it was very intriguing which is of no surprise they have many fans.The only thing I can't get over with s the very very graphic stylized gore scenes..eurgh.

But they're former gladiators fighting against the Roman empire for freedom. If there is no bloodshed, it will be Neighbours.

If you can get over the gore and bloody scenes and the graphic simulated sex scenes, you will be glued from one episode to another. You just root for the former gladiators and Spartacus struggle to strengthen the bond among the former gladiators and in their recruit to free the slaves and train them to become warriors much like them in a bid for freedom.

There is fierce loyalty and fighting for what they believe in. Before you start a war, you must know what you are fighting for.

Plus being a fangirl, I absolutely adore half naked male torsos with such great physiques across my laptop screens.

While he is great as an unofficial leader, I am in LURVE with Agron..

Yes him with the unpronounceable surname. He's quite a funny guy when he's not Agron looking at the pics through twitter and his media interviews.

And did I just lurve his character? Short tempered, yet fiercely loyal and caring with a heart. My kind of man! hehe..except for the short tempered part..but he has vastly improved so yeah, I'll take my hunk anytime.

But being in a battle almost all the time, let's hope he doesn't get killed anytime soon :S

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

I can't believe I haven't blogged about this despite my egg-citement last week! Maybe I did..but I can't seem to find since you know, I tend to ramble. If you have read it and somehow I missed it, just treat this as a repeat telecast, haha.

Anyway, I am happy to say that I can actually return to my studies! Of course everyone seems to be upgrading themselves, from taking a degree to a master's degree...but you just need to have the moolah, which obviously I don't.

Apparently from last year, I heard of this little known course in poly that offers part time diplomas to people from the same line as me who are in need of upgrading. Now, when I wish to be promoted any further in the future, I must have at least a polytechnic diploma or possess the some career readiness cert which is recognizable across ministries. These two take ages to complete and I'm not so keen with the poly diploma at first as I just couldn't afford the over 3K school fees. At least for the second one, it will be fully sponsored by the ministry so oklah, obviously I have to choose the later though I'm not so keen on it :S Why? Because I already have an O level cert and then the cert itself is equivalent to having O level cert...so really, what is the point?

While I have yet to cross the hurdle of going over my first promotion, to even think about the second promotion where I need to possess either that diploma or the cert, I do in the back of mind wish to return to my studies.

Now I am not one your studious person..and neither am I such a hardworking girl at work although I do try to finish as much work as I can. Even if I am in no mood whatsoever to do the sometimes draggy work, I just have to try my best to complete because I rely on this job as a source of income. However I do think that I shouldn't be staying at this one particular level. Somehow there is a need for me to move up and out.

Regarding the course, I went to the website and looked for this particular part time diploma in business and they do have it. I heard about the subsidies that they will provide and 70% isn't such a bad deal because that is like what..more than 50% ! But still I worry about the other 30% which thankfully is less than $1K even though in my context, paying $950 is still quite a big deal.

So I went through the faqs and then I found out they also have this MOE bursary which they offer to those working Singaporeans another $800 reward annually if my income falls within a certain per capita income. I am so happy to say that....it does! For once, I am happy I am earning only this much, haha.

So can you imagine I pay around $200 only? I know...what a bargain! All in a bid to ensure people like me can finally upgrade without having to pay a hefty fees :)

Unfortunately the deadline has closed because I didn't do my research last year and the intake was at the beginning of this year. The next intake will still be far too long. Meanwhile, I just have to try to save as much as I can for future expenses pertaining to my studies including my transport allowance. But I don't think that will pose much of a problem because I can always refer back to the CDC for financial assistance again.

My mum doesn't seem to mind as long as I bring in higher pay in the future. But she does have her concerns about me going for my studies after work, which will be 3 times per week and imagine how tired I will be. I'm already half dead when I reach home after work, let alone go for my studies?!

Honestly, I am very nervous about it. Very. The last time I sat for my exams was ten years ago! But really, it is just a matter of time and the right resources for me to resume my studies, even for a diploma as I don't think in the near future, I can afford a degree.

So this is truly TRULY exciting. Well of course there is always the tests, exams, online assessments, project work, presentations blah blah blah...which will take up so much time after work where I will normally prefer to just veg infront of the laptop.

But still, it is for the better right? Yay..I will say this again, so exciting! Hopefully they will have a second intake within this year itself and I will keep my eyes peeled for it :)

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Spotlight was having sales for the last few days and I thought I could go down and check it out since they do sell stuffs for card making and the last time, I used to buy the parts to make accessories. Speaking of accessories, I need to revitalize this hobby. Kinda preoccupied with card making this whole week, save for yesterday.

I thought I could get some items but within very limited budget...er...no more than $10? Yes, I is that poor now, haha.

But when I got there, the things are like so pretty! And I was left in dilemma on which items I should get because I wanna catch them all. Then my dilemma quickly dissipated when I received an sms which I thought was from a friend because she was gonna meet up with me, but it was regarding my performance bonus.

Yay, I'm going to get some moolah this Friday giving a whole new definition to the term..TGIF. After CPF deductions (but of course..), still have a substantial amount :P Honestly I was expecting slightly more but recalling my episode in 2010 where I barely got a $250, which translated to a not-so-good grade, I am happy that the current amount surpassed that by about 3 times.

Anyhoo, coz of that I managed to grab a few more stuffs with the money that I have now as the sales is only up to today.

Then when I got home, after a few hours, I realized that I didn't get one or two critical items which by right I should be aiming for. So uhm, I went again but it was sold out and I had to go to another scrapbooking supplies shop. What I like about this shop is that they sell things slightly cheaper than the rest which is a good thing because scrapbooking or cardmaking hobby can be pretty ex so I always aim to get things from the jap store Daiso and when they're on sales such as the recent ones.

Okay! Enough talk..look at what I've got :) In total I actually spent from Spotlight $36 down from the original $51 plus which is about $15 discount because I didn't realize they give 30% discount on each item. That's good right? I'm not a member so I'm fine with that discount too.

Stamp sets and paper pad including the acrylic blocks for the stamps..yay I found them!

Then my friend met up with me and she wanted to go Daiso and I got hold of more stuffs..okay actually 3 and they're $2 each and so I have more stamp sets.

I love the border stamps! So cute..

Then I couldn't get the white stamp pad when I got there so I had to go another shop called Made with Love from the same mall (Plaza Singapura). Eventually I got it after searching high and low for it and it was the only one left. And I got a small bottle of stickles too which is on my 'to buy' list. Oh plus some clear stamps which were on discount and I got one for free. Actually she charged one of them the price before discount but heck, at least got one more for free.

Can't wait to make another card..though I was too tired yesterday..haha.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Been awhile since I have done a blog post on beauty stuffs. Not that I have forsaken my love for beauty products..or at least, affordable beauty products because basically I can afford only them.

I have watched many beauty bloggers' videos and they are just so in love with their lipsticks and how can they not, lipsticks come in a variety of shades. And then now even those budget beauty brands have invested into making lipsticks that are of good quality and come in many pretty shades.

I would say if you want to invest in good affordable lipsticks, for under $18, you can get hold of the revlon's lip butters.

While I love the different shades and colour of make up, especially eyeshadows and my fave blushers (yum..), I am not a fan of lipsticks because apparently they don't have a lasting power plus I always feel my lips look gawdy with colour..haha.

But! I love me blushes and I have quite a collection as compared to lipsticks which are mainly given to me.

L-R: Sleek Sunrise, Le Femme Terracota & Sleek Carribean

L-R: The shades

I added three of them to my collection recently and two of them..get this, I didn't buy them at full price because I'm a cheapo like that and it's also because I don't want to spend so much money on them anymore as I have a....new hobby :) More on that in a later post.

Two of them I have bought from a blog sale so basically they were used before. But you gotta beware of such sales especially if you have sensitive skin. I do have it so if you are really in need of make up but don't want to spend much, you can look out for such sales and what you do next is to wipe it with a dry piece of tissue. But if you don't want to take the risk, simply avoid them unless they say that it's brand new item and they're selling at a discounted price because they have a similar shade or whatsoever reason.

In the last pic, you can tell why I simply wouldn't mind buying a sleek blush which is $12.00 from a local online shop as compared to the Silky girl blush or any other drugstore brand that has the same size as that blush. The palette is pretty big. Value for money I'd say.

I like this shade. If you don't wanna try other colours apart from the pink tone blushes, you can try this particular shade. It has some shimmer and you can use it also as a soft bronzer.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Remembered in my previous post, I mentioned about my family getting food vouchers after my application through the CDC for financial assistance was successful? I had collected them :)

Just some background info, slightly a month ago, I had applied for some financial assistance to help me tide over my difficulties in coping with the rising household goods prices. I went into such difficulty last year and I found it so hard to cope and I also had more outstanding bills to pay. Such a depressing period. It hasn't ended yet so I'm left with no other choice but to try my luck in seeking help from CDC because I heard they give interim help and they had also helped some of my relatives who are actually pretty much worse off than me.

It was of course such a grilling period and the interrogation was ugh. But I just had to do my best answering the questions so that I could get what I wanted. So my efforts paid off and my family was given 3 months worth of food vouchers. I am so happy because it will definitely help me to cope. While yes I admitted that I actually wouldn't mind cash handouts but at least it is better than nothing.

So here's my vouchers :)

I was actually surprised that I got all three months at the same time so imagine my glee when I am holding on to $600 worth of ntuc fairprice gift vouchers. So happy.

Of course this doesn't mean that I can afford to just buy anyhow because it already took guts for me to come down and asked for financial assistance.

So if your family is having difficulties, don't be afraid to seek for help. They will try as much as they can to help you cope tide over this difficult period. There's nothing to be ashamed of because just think that it is for the better.

I have been waiting...waiting for a good response from my brother's school that he will be accepted back in again to repeat his O level. You know what, I hate waiting. I really do. Okay actually I am fine with waiting but not when I am so nervous with anticipation so I can really imagine the trauma reality contestants go through every week.

This concerns my brother's future and also uhm, my pockets. Though there is always the option of letting him take the O level fees as a private candidate, I can't picture myself paying so much for it.

*update*

My brother's school has responded and I am happy that he is allowed to come back to school :)! All the praying has worked. My next step is to apply for financial assistance through the school and also to apply for tuition for him.

Actually just now I looked at the website of the exam board and apparently the fees is well, just slightly higher. Woops. But it doesn't matter because there is no way I could afford to enrol him for private classes because it is so expensive. Almost $2K?!! You must be kidding me!

He's kinda angry with me because he didn't want to go back there and then there is this matter of shame of returning back again and retaking the exams. But what can we do? He just have to be all thick skinned about it. I guess eventually he will get it over and done with. I went through the same thing as him, repeating the level again after not being promoted to the next level. I was absolutely feeling ostracized but thankfully for me, my then classmates were so friendly and then we become friends, right until now ten years on :)

Sometimes life throws us a curve ball and it is understandably difficult at first to accept that things are not meant to be what we want them to be. I was devastated that he was unable to go to a single polytechnic course. I would say he isn't one of those super hardworking kids but I just believe that he would end up at some course, even if it is not the best course.

Oh well. I hope he doesn't ruin this second opportunity, which almost didn't come into place if I hadn't come into the picture and tried to help him out. Even though we both may be at loggerheads at times, and he until now refuse to say that he loves me being a typical angst teenager, and I myself may say nasty things to him, he is still my brother if you know what I mean.

I wish him all the best and this time, I am also going to step up my efforts in ensuring that he does better in his exams.

Monday, March 12, 2012

How I wish I was back in the eighties where I spent my childhood times. The joys of innocence where you don't have to spend an ounce of worries about adult matters but just what to play and who to play with.

I never thought I could made it through adulthood because I just knew it will be full of challenging problems. And then I was right. Okay actually I was more concerned about outgrowing my teenage years because I couldn't stand it even though one can say that it is a period of emotional turmoil as you make friends, enemies even, discover love and a myriad of other unexplainable emotions. Then lo and behold, adulthood seemed far worse :S

Oh well, one has to go through it no matter what. Sometimes I feel that I am just not cut out on living my life like I just don't know how to handle it. If there is such a thing called a school of life, I would fail badly.

Don't you ever wonder what if your life has turned out differently...for example, for the better? I do too at times when life gets me down and I get saddled from hip to hip with debts which I had to take in order to continue surviving and putting food on my table for my family. It isn't easy and then there were those occasional times where I had to resort to dishonest acts, where if you follow my blog, you will kinda get the gist of it.

But in this school of life, you can learn a lot of things. Mistakes don't happen without a reason. They happen because they want you to learn from them and become a better person or do something different by getting you out of your comfort zone. I've made mistakes including my dishonest acts but they wouldn't have happened if I had been more careful and that I have carried on my plan on working on entrepreneurship skills.

If there is one thing I could advise young women, such as myself, and that is to learn to pick up a skill, be it baking, cooking or craft, that can help you to be more financial independent. If you have a career that clearly pays you very well, then you don't really need to worry about paying the bills and supporting the family.

But if you are like me barely making ends meet, it is best to learn a skill where nowadays some companies who wants to give back to the society or the social enterprises, are offering classes to impart skills to us. Being a woman is not easy. We actually wear a lot of hats (and okay..shoes as well) and at the end of the day, it can be so physically and mentally exhausting.

It is not true that only married women experience the more intense problems dealing with family problems, careers and having to juggle them together. Single women have their own set of problems too such as myself being a sole breadwinner for the family on barely surviving income.

So in this school of life, what doesn't kill you, make you stronger. Take every hurdle as an opportunity to make things better for yourself. I would also advise to seek help if things get more difficult like for example, myself seeking help from financial assistance when I have problems coping with the rise in prices.

Not everyone has it easy but take it as an opportunity to learn to grow and be fearless and face your problems upfront and not hide from them. While I still think that I do struggle a lot in this school of life, and getting an A is almost impossible, I just have to get it on and be thankful for every little good thing that come my way.

If there's one thing I want to do is to be able to look back few years down the road and knowing that I have survived all the way until right now and how the heck did I do it. I also want to be able to achieve at least fifty percent of what I had set my eyes upon and be dedicated and passionate towards it. I want to look squarely in the eyes of life and say, you can't bring me down. I am going to fight in this battle to find freedom from problems and ever lasting happiness.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

After one problem, comes another and sometimes I absolutely hate my life for it even though I remind myself again and again that there are other people who of course worse off than me. Like I can't imagine being left at the side of the railway station or on the streets to fend for myself as I'm a piece of trash. By the way, this is real and happening in some countries.

My brother got his appeal results for polytechnic admission and unsurprisingly he got rejected. While at first I didn't think that his life was in limbo because his former school could take him in and let him repeat his O level, and now they're telling him a different story. Now they say they have to check with the ministry as to whether he can be admitted in again as the appeal results were released a few weeks ago.

A few weeks ago?!! We just got the letter this week!!

What is this, and already the bugger wants to wait for the appeal results first and we already told the teacher that the results would only be told in March and now she drops this bombshell?!!

Now what. My mum would be throwing hissy fits if she finds out that the ministry is not able to let him repeat at his former school. She hasn't been asking and I am cringing at the thought of the ministry not letting him repeat. I'm here all worried and my brother is taking a laidback approach. It is his future!

Sometimes I say the nastiest things like why do I even have a brother?! Wouldn't life be better if I have grown up as the only child and the only person that I have to take care of is my mum?! It is not a hassle taking care of her..well most of the times...and it wouldn't matter if she's not working because the income I am earning will be enough to support us both.

Then I have to bear the burden of taking care of my brother's needs and education in Singapore. If the school can let him be admitted in again, I will ask for financial assistance as they have increased the income limit to apply for such assistance. Okay one thing is that at least the government here is not as corrupted as other governments in other countries where funds allocated do not necessarily go to the people who need them more. Of course there were about two incidents in the past where money has been misappropriated but we have a government who is constantly on the ball on how money is being used so they are often investigating so that such things don't happen. I know because I work for them and the paperwork regarding finance matters....is atrocious.

While our government is not perfect, many times they do think about the people.

Anyway back to my brother's dilemma, I do not how to react and I have to wait again for the school to have the answers regarding readmission!!! I tell ya I wouldn't be happy if I don't hear the answers that I receive. This is really unfair :(

While that problem has yet to be resolved, at least another one is resolved as we have received the interim financial assistance in the form of food vouchers. Remember at one time I applied for assistance through the CDC and then I had to wait for about a month on whether my application is successful. It is a nerve wrecking one month wait and I hate to check the mailbox but I have to for this matter.

Luckily the letter came in just yesterday which my brother saw and called me immediately regarding the outcome.

So from now until May, they will give me food vouchers to an amount of $200. Yay!! That is enough to contribute to ease the burden on my ever increasing household expense. I know that they will not give long term assistance because they still want us to be self reliant and not be too reliant on the government.

However I know this will not be my last approach towards them unless of course my transfer to the new scheme is approved and then I will have an increase in pay of about $200 over dollars.

We shall see how it goes. Oh why does every single year give me something to have a headache over..

Friday, March 09, 2012

Doesn't it suck that when you are in the same room for the many many years or even in the same small clustered office and you still can't find things when you need them?!

Anyway, I thought that I would do a quick post before I sleep again. Took a really long nap just now.

Sometimes I feel a bit flustered at how some people treat others like do they even know what they're talking about. They become too selfish and self absorbed that they fail to understand that other people may get hurt in the process. Well of course there are those motor mouthed ones who just say out what they want to say and I don't really care if they're doing that because they just have no concerns about others or they're just too narrow minded to consider other people's needs and wants. But why not for once place themselves in the shoes of the party concerned so they can look at it in a different point of view.

Well that's typically Singaporeans for you.

You know everyone's entitled to their own opinions but it will only start to irk me if they don't see the whole bird's eye view. I don't like this homophobic rants, stereotyped opinions about certain races etc etc because they just show how much we have yet to learn from other people and also to accept that some things are just facts of life so you just have to move on and get it over with. Many people will always have this fear of the unknown but once you get past the fear and try to get out of the comfort zone, your mindset immediately opens and then you will realize that you have been holding on to opinions that borders on being selfish.

Alright enough of my rant..gotta sleep. I guess people are people, you know. Just have to accept that we all come from different walks of life and so many of us are privileged enough to grow up in a society that do not have to depend on scavenger hunts to get food or to go overseas to find a job so that they can support their families back home. Don't always think negative about such people. At the end of the day, we are all merely human beings trying to survive in this big bad world and some have to fight tooth and nail to get what they want and the last thing they want is to get mistreated or treated indifferently from others.

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Whenever one of my friends talk about me whether I want to get married..I cringe. Why? I think she's pretty biased in her opinions. Well I am not that educated as in I don't have a degree and hence I am not capable of earning enough moolah so I need to get married and get a man basically to support me. For her, she is financially independent so it is 'okay' for her not to get married.

Honestly that is..what the British term it as...bullocks. Sometimes I think well educated people talk the most rubbish..haha..mostly because they're so studious and not pretty street smart. They go by the books and sometimes they don't see the big picture and may choose to believe in stereotypes.

Look, I don't like to judge people and I can be wrong but I think that is pretty biased, no?

Every girl, whether they have a degree or not, is capable of falling in love. In fact, every girl, even if she is denial mode, wants to be loved and pampered despite many of us being capable of earning our own moolah and keeping our head up high and be strong and independent. If things happen, they will happen and marriage is inevitable as two people decides to spend the rest of their lives together.

I've always thought weddings are so beautiful, even if they are majestic or just a simple affair because it symbolizes the union of two people who are in love. But I have never thought of myself snagging a guy and getting married. I have talked about this before that I don't have marriage in my life's big picture because there are so many things that I want to do but haven't got around to doing them and also because I've gone through a lot in my own family. One of the last things I want to do is to have my own family and then there comes another set of headache. Marriage is not all bliss you know, in case you haven't noticed the increasing divorce rates.

But let's be optimistic for awhile...and uhm, realistic. I just can't see myself getting married and having a family but still, I'm pretty much open minded that if it is written in the stars I will get married, then I can't be fighting tooth and nail to go against it. But uhm, I hope it doesn't come to that point, haha.

So like what..am I commitment phobic? I don't know. I can only tell you that I have already seen myself incapable of raising a family. That's about it. But I am not cynical about the ideas of falling in love and even Rihanna thinks that we can fall in love in hopeless places, not necessarily places where guys are a sure find. I think love is magical and I especially love how two people can get together despite the many setbacks that they go through.

Because it is hard to explain to certain people who just refuse to understand, sometimes I just have to play along and bemoan that OH! I can't find a guy...I think guys are shallow nowadays...they won't date girls like me who has zero personality and average looks...blah blah blah. I know it's not true because I've seen quite a lot of couples where the girl is bigger than the guys or the guy is so handsome and the girl is just uhm...average. Of course we as outsiders see them as a strange looking couple though I chose to believe that well, they found something special in one another.

Still the truth still lies that I am just losing out in terms of my social life which you can almost dub as non-existent, haha. Tell me how to meet guys like that? I don't even hang out at hopeless places and be hopelessly in love later.

But whatever it is, girls...don't look for guys because you want someone to support you financially. It shouldn't be the reason of getting married. Anything can happen as if you don't know that enough so you have to be prepared and do things for the right reasons especially since marriage is a long term commitment.

I'm still holding out for that one chance to get to know guys and be friends with them, even if it means going on casual dates that lead to nothing. I don't think I can just count on my male colleagues as 'friends' right? As they're..uhm..the only male people I talked to, apart from my brother that is.

I have thought about what kind of places we will go on our date, and movie isn't one of them. Prior to going on such dates, I may have to brush up on my conversation skills and know stuffs in general because I am actually a closeted dumb blonde.

So do you agree that girls without degrees should get married for financial reasons? My answer is of course a resounding no. It should NEVER be the reason. We girls should be capable of taking care of ourselves but of course, we like to be pampered as well :)

Sunday, March 04, 2012

Yesterday I was so star struck because I was in such close proximity with a celebrity chef!! I watch his show occasionally and he's such a dream boat. I never thought I would meet him..in a supermarket no less...but apparently he would have a cooking demo over there. And I felt so lucky because I heard the tickets for his official cooking demo hosted by AFC was sold out...I mean not that I wanted to go in the first place. I called my mum, who is a fan, that he was there and she actually came down later, haha.

OMG I was so over the moon! Okay too bad I don't have the personality of my other friend who I suppose would just go up to him and say HI!!!!! I'm too shy for that and I was already grinning like an idiot, what more talk to him? I would just DIE.

He is so tall and big as in not big like fat but like larger in life..u know, huggable sorta material, heh. I somehow knew it was him because of his tattoos but he was just standing there casually with no bodyguards around talking to another chef in white. He is so handsome! Imagine if I actually have the courage to go up to him..what would I say..'Hi I know you from Chuck's Day Off. I don't cook but I like watching your show'...*awkward idiotic grin* Argh..I can't imagine that, haha. There was a couple who actually recognised him and he was so down to earth and friendly extending his tattooed arm for a handshake and then taking a picture with them. It could have been me! Dammit, how I wish I have no shame in talking to guys in general. I mean at least for once.

Yes I saw Celebrity Chef Chuck Hughes!

He won against Bobby Flay in the Iron Chef America

He didn't look as scruffy but very clean cut. Argh...who cares about local guys now?! hahaha..just kidding.

Such dreamboat. Now can I formally look for a boyfriend who is tall, huggable, handsome and can cook? Because I definitely can't.

I am so happy this has made an appearance at the gym I frequent...presenting the

CROSS TRAINER!!

For the life of me, I can't remember what is the name but I've got a feeling it is the same brand as the pic above. So this cross trainer..ahem...can give you a total body workout as it can make use of both your upper body and lower body.

Why am I egg-cited about this? Well the ones that we used to have in the gym were mainly for the lower body because the arms were static and were mere handles for you to hold on to. And of course I would recall the times when I first started on my gym sessions at work and I went on this baby.

Honestly it was hard at first and I struggled big time. Then again, I struggled throughout gym time but I guess I found my silent determination and soon I was making waves on it and they make me burn fats faster and become leaner faster too. Soon I was shedding weight like nobody's business. However there was only one of these babies and then people, even the skinny papayas, would hop on it and didn't seem to wanna get off the bloody thing. Because I still wanted to get on them, I had to use other machines first and then waited until quite late just so that I could have a go for it so it didn't matter to me if I were to go home much later than my other colleagues.

So that was my backstory. Anyway, I realized that I put on quite a lot of weight last year and this year I would just focus on getting back on track and finally achieving my dream weight..which honestly is still considered overweight but heck, if I come out of it looking leaner than ever before, it didn't really matter.

I also mentioned in my previous post how I was switching from buttered wholemeal bread to simply digestives as lunch. I know the sound of it is rather torturous already but believe me, you'll feel healthier and then dinner, you can have something heavier and yet still healthy like probably you can have your veggies which I do most of the times.

So now within 2 weeks, I actually don't feel as bloated as I always do but kinda fitter.

And I also used an additional product. No no...there were no pills. I used this product called Celebrity's Choice inchloss body cream and shower scrub. Okay I just bought it coz it was just...pfft...$2 per pack for a trial size so why not even though I have a bigger work surface area to cover, if you know what I mean. Usually for such products, I don't rely on them for some miracle. Even if it does work, it's just so little effect.

I didn't take the picture but I can provide a link of someone who had used it before:

I had bought such products before in the past and that time, it did work in the sense that my tummy area felt firmer and looks slimmer. As for using it in the present, it pretty much worked in that way. However I can't prove it since I didn't measure myself in the first place. It could be psychological that I felt that way but I know my body that there is some change in it.

I didn't use it in any other areas such as my arms or thighs coz it's such a small tube and even then I use sparingly for my tummy area only. There is this heating sensation that needs time to get used to. I normally feel the sensation when I'm walking to work and then at work itself in the morning as I walk around. The heat also intensifies when I am at the gym and working out.

For the shower scrub I can use it further covering my thighs and my bum. At first I didn't use it together but just the cream which I started using way earlier. Then I just thought heck, why not since it came together anyway and so far, I believe that it has worked better together.

But don't take my word for it because it could just be psychological as I didn't measure up first. But seriously its $2. And there is no short cut to weight loss ever. It helps to aid in the loss of inches but ultimately it's your diet and exercise combo that should lead to such loss.

Currently it is available at certain watson's shop if you are interested.

Okay I am feeling the after effects of the gym workout from using the new cross trainer. Ouch :S but er..no pain no gain I guess.

Saturday, March 03, 2012

You know, I have never been confident in my looks. I think I'm plainer than your average Jane..haha...but I just take it with a pinch of salt. Like it or not, it is who I am. Of course I do wish I am slimmer so that clothes will fit me better and I'm werking on it though it has been hard. I must admit though that my recent diet change to include digestive biscuits instead of wholemeal bread with margarine or peanut butter is a good switch for lunch at work.

Okay anyway, I do think that to attract guys, you must have either brains and beauty, beauty and if you don't have that, you must have a great personality. Sadly I don't have that and no I'm not like thinking oh what the heck, this is so depressing. It's just me. I am still working on my personality like trying to make changes in my life so as to make a better me and I am taking one step at a time.

But for me to get some interest going with some guys, I think that will take a mega long time as I'm just not the sort who...attracts the opposite sex. Oh well, take it in my stride.

My friends will beg to differ though. I've got a friend who likes to point at random girls, make me look at them and then wishing she has her legs, hair etc etc and currently she's looking skinnier because of the change in her diet due to some stomach illness. Judging from her new appearance, I'm wishing I have that stomach illness...but uhm...I think my bout with food poisoning is enough for now. Sometimes I do think that it is easier for thinner people to say that oh, you're still pretty and blah blah blah...like they don't know what plump girls like me go through. We actually have to work twice as hard to be that appealing and gorgeous to girls...and the case of such girls who attract fab boyfriends who don't give a sh*t about their looks, it is so much super rare and they have such a mega personality, it is hard not to fall in love with them.

Before I make this such a depressing post, for single girls like me who find it hard to attract guys, don't fret. You shouldn't care about what other people think and that you always think you are just not good enough. Begin with saying that you are FABULOUS and things will fall into place. So it takes time for guys to take a liking to you but heck, work on things that make you...YOU. If you learn to love yourself first, by making yourself gorgeous such as making the effort to dress up, be healthy, charming and loves a good laugh every now and then, naturally people will be more attracted to you...both guys and girls. You will be such a fab friend to have :)

So yes, this advice is what I'm giving myself too. Just think gorgeous and think you're fabulous and what would a fab girl like you do. Sit infront of the computer and watch soap reruns ? *ahem* No! You should be doing things that you like by building on your interests and would be nice to add on as a conversation starter :)

Remember that love don't come too easily but they will come eventually....if you learn to love yourself first.

I like March..well, one thing is that I don't think I would sorta suffer financially, probably initially after pay day but we will work things out as always. This month if my work performance was good this year, I would be getting a performance bonus. Then end of the month, we will get our usual quarterly maintenance allowance. But having gone through a bad patch in 2010 in regards to my performance bonus, I think that the best is that I don't hope for much. Last year was of course the best because I also received additional bonus from the government which added to the amount to quite a lot.

However I realize that no matter how much money I hold, I just can't save that much. Point being, I am a single income earner and also a breadwinner. The additional money that I get will mostly go into household expenses although for last year's money, I managed to pay my brother's national exam fees. I don't earn much in the first place so naturally I will use this extra income to top up the household expenses. Then in Singapore, it is a struggle because the things here are generally more expensive.

Hence if you follow my previous posts, I am also trying to brush up my artwork so that I can make use of my own creativity to make moolah. Just like Carrie Underwood who went into singing to so called sing her way through college fees, and unexpectedly get a windfall out of it, we just have to rely on other sources to help keep us afloat during trying periods in terms of finance.

But then like I've always said, there will always be someone worse off than you and even the super rich ones, do still keep old habits like driving their old car or even using the bicycle to go to work. We can't always lavish ourselves with expensive things just because we can. I mean I'm not saying you can if you can afford it but try not to be so selfish and get lost in the world of fine dining and expensive travels and do some good too.

Speaking of income, just early this week I went for a briefing regarding my work scheme. Recently those in the new scheme had a pay raise and we were obviously not given it because we were still in the old scheme and didn't do the transfer back then as it was not popular. My concern was mostly because this new scheme is performance based. At that time I was just starting out in this new ministry so it will be a disadvantage for me. Then two years later I actually got a menial performance bonus which got me pretty worked up like I almost wanted to quit.

Because of this new pay raise, and the unhappiness of the people in my group who did not get them, they held a briefing saying that we will stand to have a better pay if we switch to this new scheme. I would say the pay is definitely better and I will actually get 15% pay raise. Honestly my current pay kinda sucks because it is actually below market value.

My boss said that we shouldn't worry about the performance part because she would put in good words for us. Oh well, she may be fierce at times and a go getter but she really watches our back. But then again she doesn't make the final decision. As for me, in terms of performance I only touch base..haha. I'm not the one who make big decisions that can change everything. I'm like work done and I can go home type. You won't see as an excellent worker..haha.

Anyhoo, I will be applying for the transfer though it is still subjected to approval. I hope that they will approve and by June I will get a big fat pay cheque..haha. Why? Because they will be backdating the additional income (for e.g if I earned 1500 previously and in june I earn 1700, I will get the additional 200 from each month of feb to may) unless I get a promotion in May. By then, I won't get the backdated income but just enjoy my new salary if I agree to the transfer unless I turn down the promotion. But who the heck turns down a promotion especially for me because I've never been promoted at work before despite working for like 9 years? (oh, speaking of which coincidentally when I write this, I realize today is officially the fourth year of me being in this workplace).

I've got a good feeling that this will be my year as in I will be promoted. But it's just a feeling only because I took on a new job scope last year but how I perform in it only my boss can assess. Of course I made mistakes along the way but with the mistakes, I learn. Then now when they mention about the backdated pay, I suddenly think that maybe, they shouldn't promote me this year, haha. For someone who is always financially tight, that will work out to quite a lot for me, eh.

So let's see how it goes because it is not an immediate transfer. It's always like that like there is no such thing as free lunch...unless they hold a buffet at my workplace and I can takeaway the leftovers for dinner. But if they accept (oh please please), the new pay will be to my advantage. However I just need to work harder as this time they are tougher. If you get a D, you won't get any bonus at all...and yes I got a D before. Scary mary..but what to do, part and parcel of working life. They not only want efficient workers, they also want workers who think out of the box.

Sigh, looks like I have to step up on the game then and not just do work given to me.

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Living Each Single Day

Hey, welcome to my little online space. I would say this is a blog of sorts, to help me sort out my thoughts. I also write about things going in my life with friends & family and being out and about in sunny Singapore. Life isn't easy, everyone knows that. While we are at it, don't forget to live life to the fullest :)