I had the opportunity to work with a group of 35 managers this week in a full-day strengths based leadership training event. One of the first questions I asked was for each person to describe their management style in one word. Obviously you might need more than one simple word to describe your style but it was an interesting exercise to learn more about each person and connect the group. The responses ranged from direct, listener, empowering, positive, supportive and more. It’s critical for each manager to understand his/her management style and then gain feedback on how effective it is.

If you’re not sure what your management style might be, a valuable approach is to identify your strengths to first understand what you do well (you can take the CliftonStrengths assessment to identify your top strengths). As an example, if your strength is developer your management style might be supportive, if your strength is consistency your style could be fairness and if your strength is strategic your style might be thoughtful. One of the words that was shared repeatedly was direct and I think it will be helpful to discuss in more depth.

It’s important to understand that being direct is neutral but it’s the person that makes a “direct” management style effective or ineffective. When you use your management style effectively you increase trust and respect and when you don’t you decrease trust and respect.

When a “direct” management style is effective, people know where they stand, they get immediate feedback on a project, issues are dealt with before they escalate and decisions are made rather than put off. For example, one client was direct in dealing with a conflict by identifying the issue in a timely way and talking to the people involved to understand the issues and make suggestions to help resolve it. This was an effective approach because it dealt with the issue, helped the team stay on track and prevented any additional drama.

When a “direct” management style is ineffective, the manager’s direct words can be harsh, insensitive, offensive, off-putting, increase conflicts and lack compassion. For example, the manager who gives negative feedback in an offensive way in the middle of a meeting and embarrasses someone on his team so the person receiving it is demotivated and wondering if they need to find another job.

Managers need to understand that sometimes you need to tone up or tone down your management style rather than say this is how I am so take it or leave it. Managers need to be aware enough to observe how their style is working to engage the team, build trust, create a stable environment, instill hope, show compassion and produce results. It’s not enough to only deliver results without the other elements if you want people to want to work on your team and contribute at their highest levels.

What’s your management style and how do you know if it’s effective?

About Alissa

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher, Brookfield Property Partners, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb and Dress for Success. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook

I created this special Living in YOUR Top 1% action plan podcast because I know how difficult it can be to get started. I have also learned that we all need some support regardless of our previous achievements. The perfect place to start is right where you are regardless of how imperfect it may seem at the time. Please give yourself 25 minutes of uninterrupted time to focus on yourself and listen to the podcast. Feel free to write down some ideas in your journal or computer to start the process. The ideas in this podcast are from my book Living in YOUR Top 1%which provides a more detailed roadmap to help people live their best life.

Living in YOUR Top 1% is about expanding your mindset and broadening your idea of what’s possible to live YOUR best life. It’s about taking the words can’t, should and impossible out of your vocabulary and focusing on what you CAN do today — however big or small the step may be. It’s often only a small mindset shift between good and great. Think about what goals you would be excited to achieve this year and then let’s make it happen.

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb, the Milken Institute, LA Business Journal, Prostate Cancer Foundation, and NBC Universal. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook

As we start the new year I like to first take a moment and have my clients focus on their wins for the previous year. What are you most proud about and why? Your wins can be big or small. It’s important to focus on what went well and what accomplishments you achieved. They could include starting a new business, getting a major client, writing your first blog, surpassing a certain revenue figure, becoming a yoga instructor, successfully changing roles or careers or making time for your family and friends. What did you learn and how will that shape your decisions for 2017?

The next thing I like to have my clients focus on is selecting two or three specific things they want to improve or change. People don’t change until they are ready and decide to make something a priority and commit to it. People will make the change when they realize it actually benefits and improves their own life. The other important element to realize is it’s not enough to think that you’ve successfully changed. We need the people in our life or at work to let us know they see a change. So if you are working on sharing your voice or listening, we can only know that we have successfully made the change when our circle of friends or co-workers sees a difference.

Here is where a new twist on feedback called feedforward comes in. This is a concept that Marshall Goldsmith, an executive coach, developed and it’s very impactful. Feedback focuses on what happened in the past. It focuses on what we are not doing well. Does anyone like to hear what we are not doing well? Most people I know do not like hearing feedback unless it’s positive and even then we are nervous until we know what the feedback is about. Feedforward is a very empowering process where the person making the change selects the behavior they want to work on. They pick 4-5 supportive and non-judgmental people to share the behavior with and ask for two suggestions to help. You are only allowed to say thank you and nothing else to each person who makes a suggestion.

You can do this with your team at work and it goes like this:

* Select a behavior that you want to change

* Partner up with a co-worker and share the behavior you plan to change (ie, I will share my voice in team meetings).

* Your partner shares two suggestions of FeedForward that can have a positive impact.

* Each person in the exercise takes notes on the suggestions made.

* Thank your partner for their suggestions. You can only say thank you and nothing else. This allows each person to fully listen.

* The other partner shares what he or she is working on and receives two suggestions. They thank the person for their suggestions.

* You repeat the process with another partner.

This is an exercise in giving and receiving feedback without making a judgment. You simply thank your partner for listening and sharing a suggestion. You may not like every suggestion but you may also be surprised and receive a few good ideas that you would not have previously considered. Most people enjoy this exercise because it’s forward thinking and involves something that you have control over and can change.

3 Rules to honor for FeedForward:

People can only say thank you and nothing else when you hear the suggestions.

Keep this as a judgment free zone. You don’t need to tell your partner whether you like their ideas but rather simply say thank you.

Each partner sharing exercise should be under three minutes in total with both people sharing.

Once you have shared what you want to work on, you circle back to this same group of people each month to ask them how you’re doing. If they see a change you know you are making progress if they don’t you need to keep working. This is a process so give yourself at least a few months to see progress or more.

Including the process of feedforward into your routine is essential to getting better and improving. We have to involve other people in this process to get their input and learn how we are doing. Even if you think you have become a better listener but your inside circle thinks you still interrupt others, you may lose their respect and have unnecessary conflicts.
This is an easy and fun way to make a huge impact in your life and improve your relationships in all areas of your life. I’ll share three specific things I am focusing on for the new year: fully listening and pausing before I speak rather than reacting, being patient and staying present with each conversation (ie put your phone away)!!

Feel free to share what you are working on for the new year!

About Alissa

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher, Brookfield Property Partners, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb, the Milken Institute, LA Business Journal, Prostate Cancer Foundation, and NBC Universal. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook

As a Gallup Certified Strengths Coach I have seen how a strengths approach can make a difference for employees, customers and companies. It’s a win-win. The Gallup Organization does amazing research on the strengths based approach and how it can help your employees, managers and organization. Here are a few excellent articles to learn more. Feel free to contact me with any questions or to learn more about doing a strengths seminar for your team.

* How a strengths based development approach can improve profit, sales, engagement for your company, customers and employees

* Managers can make a huge impact in the success of your company and employee engagement. This article shares why managers matter, how they can make a positive or negative impact and a few strategies to help them development.

* The strengths based development approach is impactful. This article shares some powerful stats that companies are seeing from using this approach. It also shares some best practices for managers to consider.

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb, the Milken Institute, LA Business Journal, Prostate Cancer Foundation, and NBC Universal. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook

This past year I’ve had the opportunity to work with emerging leaders, managers and established leaders in various industries including commercial real estate, education, legal services, food industry, finance, accounting, security, tech and more. What’s most interesting to me is that regardless of the industry, role or title we all face many of the same issues at work and in our life. One key issue that consistently shows up is sharing our voice in a productive way regardless of your position. This is simple but not always easy to do.

We all need to find an authentic and meaningful way to share our voice whether we are introspective, thoughtful, supportive, reserved, talkative, direct, action oriented, visionary or an idea generator. How we share our voice in conversation, under pressure, when we disagree, during meetings or in difficult situations impacts how people think of us. It impacts how they trust and respect us and whether they think we add or detract value. If you add value people will want to partner with you more often and if you detract value people start to lose respect. It’s important to realize that this behavior contributes to how people view us.

Sharing our voice ties into the brand we want to build for ourself. Some people have something to say about everything while others prefer to stay quiet and think through all the possibilities before they speak – neither approach is necessarily good or bad. We all need to consider how we show up and if this aligns with the brand we want to create for ourself and the results.

Here are a few questions to consider:
1. What 3 words would you use to describe yourself?
2. What 3 words would others use to describe you?
3. What steps can you take to more effectively share your voice?

As we move into the new year, this is the perfect time to reflect on how we show up and the impact we are capable of making in the world.

About Alissa

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb, the Milken Institute, LA Business Journal, Prostate Cancer Foundation, and NBC Universal. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook