5 Women Share the Most Bizarre and Creative Tactics They Use to End Fights with Their Partners

If you're in a grown-ass relationship, you've probably discovered that pouting, yelling, and ignoring his texts and calls are not super-productive ways to end a fight. But even with that wisdom, it can be hard to take a deep breath, wave your white flag, and agree that it's OK for socks to occasionally be left on the living room couch.

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But compromise you must, says Jennifer Freed, Ph.D., author and marriage and family therapist. "Resolution of all conflicts requires both people to understand each other and aim for a win/win," says Freed.

While that sounds nice in theory, sometimes it's tough, says Freed. That's why we asked five women to weigh in on the tactics they've used to stop a fight in its tracks.

We Look Each Other in the Eyes

"I've learned the hard way that it’s easy to fight and scream if the person you're arguing with is not right in front of you. When my husband and I were dating, we did the long-distance thing for a year. We fought so badly during that time. When we finally lived together, we had a rule that we had to look each other in the eyes when we were fighting. We had to sit really close and couldn't take our eyes off of each other during the fight. It’s really hard to scream at someone that way. It seems that we get things resolved way faster when we do this. We recently fought over a comment he made to me about my morning routine. Instead of yelling at each other across the house, we sat on the couch and did the eye contact method. After three minutes, we hugged and things were fine." —Krista A., 33

We Get a Mediator

"My husband and I have been married for five years. We both fall under the zodiac sign Aries, which makes us super stubborn. When we argue, we can carry it on for a week straight without a resolution. So we've found that the best and only way to resolve an issue is to bring a third person in to be our middleman. We set a timer and state our case, one at a time. Having rules like that has allowed us to make our point and listen to the other person speak. Having a mediator has really helped. We did this recently when we argued over the color to paint our house. It was a really huge argument. We asked one of our neighbors to come over and be the mediator. After an hour, we both agreed on a color. Normally, an argument like that could have taken us a week to settle." —Teresa L., 38

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We Pass a Talking Stick

"My problem is that I talk over everyone. I am so bad at letting people speak without interrupting them. When I fight with my boyfriend, I just end up yelling over him. He doesn’t get a word in. We recently started using a talking stick so that only the person who has the stick can speak. We took it one step further by agreeing that if I don’t follow the talking stick rules, I have to do an extra chore. If I make it through a fight without interrupting, then my boyfriend has to take on an extra chore. It works well because we’ve turned our fights into a very weird game." —Amy D., 28

We Go Dead Silent

"I’m sure many relationship experts will say that ignoring your spouse is the worst thing you can do in a fight. But in my case, it’s the best. My husband and I have been married for six years, and we've tried everything to end fights on good terms. Nothing seemed to work for us except the silent rule. Mid-fight, we take a break to do our own thing for an hour. For me, that usually means taking a walk or a shower. When we come back to talk after the break, we can have a calm conversation." —Brittany W., 36

We Kiss

"I’m the worst at ending fights because I carry on too long and hold grudges. My fiancé started doing this thing where he kisses me randomly during a fight. It’s really funny because it always catches me off guard. I kind of love it. I was fighting with him last week about how he always picks the same place to eat all the time and how I really hate that place. I was starting to raise my voice, and then out of nowhere, he kissed me. It really helps us squash fights over something stupid." —Catherine K., 27

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