Today, I was in a really good mood. Even though my mother is so mad at my sister and I for going away to college soon, she literally can’t go a day without causing an argument, or stomping around, or hiding away.

I was okay, and was brushing it all off.

Though somewhere, sometime… I’m thinking that it was around the time when I asked my mother about my birthday. She had promised me a trip then canceled it, and for that, I expected her to at least try to make it up to me.

So when I asked, “… Mommy? Are we doing anything for my birthday…?”

*silence*

“…Mom?”

*silence*

“Because—”

“Just figure out what you want to do and tell me.”

And that was it. She didn’t care enough to make plans for my birthday at all. She really doesn’t care.

And after that, I got a little upset, and hid in the shower for a long time. And somewhere in that time, I got really depressed about my looks, and my weight, and… everything else.

What did I do to be treated like this… I’m not a bad daughter…

And I look horrible~! I can hardly stand looking at myself~!

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2 Responses to “A sudden change.”

hello Alyssa^^ well, I can’t stand looking at myself so I can’t really talk about that, trying to cheer you up~ but about your mom,~ maybe she’s sad about something? maybe she is tired of things she doesn’t like in her life, and she acts like that. I don’t think she wants to treat you that way just because~
you are a good daughter, you study a lot and care about your future, and you are so sweet!
Tell her what you want to do for your birthday ^^

PS: about chinese! I watch Nihao Kailan! at uhm.. I think it’s discovery kids, or is it fox kids? well, it’s a really nice show but you know, for kids hahah ~ but they teach you some chinese words, though I think the language is so difficult~ much more than japanese! but it’s really nice and a very important one, so it’s a good choice to learn it!

You are right Georgina, my mom is kind of sad about a lot of things… but it’s mostly because (I think) everything for her is changing at once. I get upset… but I should really be more patient with her. After all, she doesn’t like her job, or our house, or anything else.. and suddenly, we (me and my sisters) are going to be leaving.):
But thank you so much~ *hugs*
Oh my goodness~! ^^ I love Ni Hao Kai Lan, I love childen’s shows in general~! ^^ I find it as a bit of a hard to use as a language tool, just because I like to know exactly what it is I’m repeating… like I wish it had… a spelling of the word? So that I know I am hearing it right… you know? ^^;
But it’s still so so cute~! >w