Since the Pakistani government punishes homosexuality with prison time and whippings, it makes sense that their Telecommunication Authority has decided to start blocking text messages containing the words “lesbian”, “gay” and “bisexual.” What’s really odd though is the thousands of other words they’ve also blocked such as “Jesus Christ,” “satan” and “monkey crotch.” We’ve pulled the weirdest words from the official list and most of them also make great pet names.

Anal Annie gave birth to crotch monkey ass puppies after having a cum fest with an assklown named B Hard. Since they were axing the weasel with her bazongas, assklown’s cum bubble butt stain… oh fuck I give up. And I didn’t even get to ‘clam digger’.

Long story short, the only crotch monkey ass puppy that survived the cock queen’s foot fuck turned out to be good ol’ Bush Jr. :P