Mother’s Day always creeps up on me. Unlike birthdays or anniversaries, I never remember Mother’s Day until it’s here. Suddenly, I’m surrounded by the reminder that unfortunately, my mother is no longer here to celebrate. It’s not a holiday I actively dread, I no longer feel the need to avoid it and seeing the cards and flowers and ads doesn’t bother me like it used to. My family and I decided a few years ago that we would stop mourning my Mum’s death and instead, celebrate the life she led and the happiness she brought to us when we had her.

It will be 10 years this year since she passed and I still think about her, practically every day. Now, however, I can remember her with a smile. I’m reminded on Mother’s Day that I am lucky enough to still have my father, a strong, brave, and selfless man who raised me and my siblings alone through the hardest years of our lives. I remember I have siblings who make me laugh until I cry and have taught me patience, a great deal of patience! I think of all the amazing, strong women in my life who have let me cry and share and laugh with them.

No-one can replace my mother, I wish I could know her today and get to know her better now I’m grown. But the best way to celebrate Mother’s Day is not by grieving, but by living. –Living like she did with a mad sense of adventure, never being afraid of who you are or what you want in life and above all, being a great woman—something I can strive to be one day.