stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

hope you are having fun JCJ, lovely to just get away................

thank you as always for dinner, yum yum

been up to see mum and managed to sort some stuff out, felt pleased about that. she was chatting away really well today but still looks poorly then out for dinner tonight it was lovely, threw in a glass of the red stuff too, woo hoo.

lots going on tomorrow, don't think i will manage to do it all in one day, aargh...........

but there will be birthday cake in the shed GD 's birthday, not sure yet but suspect it maybe chocolate xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Glad your DIY went to plan. No odd left over bits or wonky legs! Not even on the furniture!

Not really a posh hotel. - "only" a 3*, but that's posh for us. We're more used to Traveldodge! It's been really odd packing to stay in a hotel with the car. Usually only use hotels for Morwich and Norecambe "visiting/meeting the girls" trips when we/I travel by train.

Oh doesn't moan when I'm driving, or comment at all - unless I'm driving his car - but his anxiety makes him shake and twitch more which I find really off-putting when I'm trying to concentrate. (Imagine a dog scratching rigorously; that's what it sounds like). Travelling in the back makes it less stressful for him and therefore for me too. Hopefully tomorrow's journey won't be too bad. I know the road: driven it loads of times, and it's not too far.

Dinner is roast pork, roasties, Yorkshire pudding, sprouts, roast parsnips, carrots, stuffing, apple sauce and gravy followed by pears poached in brandy, ice cream, shortbread (still getting through the Christmas stash!!) and chocolate brandy sauce. Help yourselves. No more cooking for me until at least Thursday, possibly not until next weekend.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

When you are driving, if OH is moaning just say do you want me to stop and let you out so you can make your own way there???

That'll teach him

Well, been busy DIY ing..............couldn't buy the under sink cabinet because sink is an unusual shape and pedestal part is huge so would have defeated the purpose..........sooooooooo bought a small cabinet that sits at the side, managed to make it up but put hinges on the wrong way, all sorted now and am really pleased with results. Also bought a towel ring and that is up now too, woo hoo!!

Am just going to the chippie tonight, on the "CBA" bench most of the day and believe me it will be an effort to walk around the corner, but a bigger effort to make anything haha xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Both cars still on the drive. I just didn't have the mental energy to renegotiate with OH AND car buying company. I had intended to sort it out during half term, as we're not visiting the girls this time, but I have just booked 3 nights in a hotel in Ashbourne, Derbyshire for next week, as OH desperate to get away from the house. It's only about 90 minute drive away so hopefully he won't stress too much about it - and he sits in the back in the car now which makes it easier. We haven't booked our summer holiday yet and if this one goes OK it might give us more options.

Spent an hour or so in the garden this afternoon doing a bit of pruning and tidying. Lovely to be outside and not be freezing or getting soaked. The spring bulbs are all flowering and the birds were twittering away. Wonderful.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Have you a local handyman who can come and build cabinet for you? I've seen adverts in our local paper for such a service. Doesn't cost too much - furniture still probably cheaper than ready built?

I am on the FF bench. They never showed up to collect OH's car. Spitting feathers! After I spent so long convincing him that it was worth accepting less for the car in order to have a relatively stress-free transaction. Collection due between 2pm and 6pm. Driver will phone an hour before. Phone call at 1:30pm to say driver running late. Will now be between 5:30pm and 7. 6:30pm - another call: had I heard from the driver yet? No! By 8pm I tried to ring to see what was happening but of course none of the numbers were being answered - office closes at 6pm. So they couldn't have completed payment at 7pm anyway? ? Grrrrrr! As you can imagine, it's been a very stressful afternoon! OH has tried really hard to keep it together but at 8 O'clock he finally snapped and told me to "Tell them to st*ff it!" I have blasted off a strongly worded email - keyboard warrior that I am - but I don't think OH will sell to them now even if they come grovelling. Back to square one. . Felt like ramming the da** thing when I put my car back on the drive just now!

Glad you won't have to wait so long for next lido, it's good to have the date.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Not too bad a week ahead, up to see Mum, into town and out with GD on Thurs for tea. We have finally managed to have a free evening..............

Cold here, frosty evenings and sunshine during the day, don't mind this weather.

New lido appt came over weekend, 7 weeks, so that's great.

Have been looking at under sink storage cabinets for YD's bathroom, but the one that is pretty is DIY mmmmmmmmmm, struggle to build things now, would have liked to surprise her, will see when I venture into shop if it's an easy one or complicated, why are the instuctions always so difficult??? xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Condolences to your family FF, you never want anyone to suffer.

So pleased car is going JCJ, thought it was a great service, Mum was also very sad to see car go, she was "the driver " in the family and that sense of freedom was diminished, it was def the right decision (for Mum) albeit a sad one. Your OH still has you driving, may be able to start thinking about scooters again in the next few months.

Happy you are enjoying being a part timer!

Both GC are doing well, GS is very dainty and GD is a hulk hahaha!!!

Colic has gone, think it was the one of the worst things ever and made me very glad I didn't experience it with my children............hats off to all parents that endure.............

Had a lovely, lovely surprise yesterday, ED sent me flowers, chocs and a little note was enclosed that made me blubber for ages...........

Am busy, busy with washing, have loads to do, miss a couple of days and there is a mountain to climb, only one more load to go, woo hoo. Everything that can be tumble dried is being dried that way.

Still have to hoover, will do it after the next cup of tea, this is the third time I have said that.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Commiserations to D's family, FF. Although, as you say, I'm sure their grief is softened by relief that she's no longer suffering.

OH's car is sold. Online company coming to.collect it on Monday, (thanks Katy! ) That will be an extremely sad and difficult day for OH. But I will be relieved that it's gone and isn't sitting there, in my way and steadily devaluing. Hopefully, when it's no longer there as a constant reminder, he might feel better. Probably not.

Only 1 week left to half term. I'm not as desperate for a holiday as I usually am at this time - the benefits of being a lazy part-timer! I even made some bread last weekend! Not sure I'll make a habit of it because it was a lot of faff, iand I won't be on "Bake Off", but the rolls were yummy, if a teeny bit solid. Made with Wholemeal seeded flour. Tasty! I'll put some in the shed with my homemade turkey soup. Made Barrabrith today. I'll put some of that in there too.

Don't think we're going to Morwich this half term because DIL is about to give birth, YD doesn't want to take time off work until the baby's born, so she can have her 2 weeks 'paternity' leave, and we're going in April anyway. May go somewhere else for a couple of days. Or may just stay here on the CBA bench?!

Hope the babies are still doing fine, Katy. It'll be lovely for the cousins growing up, being so close in age.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Congratulations on being Nannie to four, you are catching me up! So glad everything went well.

Snow all gone after all the rain we've had. School much as usual.

SIL's mother died last night and really it is a blessed release, she was 91 and her quality of life for the last year was......?

So i've done quite a lot a babysitting for the last few days. Some interesting/difficult questions from the 13 yr old GD who obviously didn't feel she could ask her Mum and Dad! Eek! Hope I got the answers right but I've relayed it all to he Mum so we'll be on the same page.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Congratulations! Nanny x 4! 38 minutes??? That was quick! Well, I suppose it was her third. So pleased she had it naturally _ I'm guessing baby turned herself around?

Glad lido effective and not too much hassle this time.

Are you able to get to school yet, FF?

Had to put 2 new tyres on the car yesterday. Tread was still legal, but they were cracking and wearing unevenly. Not the best timing with my first reduced pay cheque! Ah well, if they last 10 years like the ones they replaced it won't be so bad.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Congratulations! Nanny x 4! 38 minutes??? That was quick! Well, I suppose it was her third. So pleased she had it naturally _ I'm guessing baby turned herself around?

Glad lido effective and not too much hassle this time.

Are you able to get to school yet, FF?

Had to put 2 new tyres on the car yesterday. Tread was still legal, but they were cracking and wearing unevenly. Not the best timing with my first reduced pay cheque! Ah well, if they last 10 years like the ones they replaced it won't be so bad.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Maybe we are???? And we don't know it???? Arrrrrrgh

What a difference a day makes, can put my feet on the ground without inwardly screaming and I am feeling ok hurrah!!

Went really well, canula second attempt, posh new surroundings but within the bowels of the hospital, found a short cut on the way back out but think I used docs private lift haha, it was very swanky.............

Still trying to get me to have it in tummy but am really trying to resist, last thing I want

ED will be off to hospital on Wed, there was a cancellation so am hoping baby arrives that day and she's not there for days, am feeling super excited xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

I'm not one either...............or am I???

It was just the complete hassle free way for Mum to get rid off car, she didn't have to leave the house and am sure money was in her bank account an hour or less later. Fingers crossed it's gone soon, one less thing to worry/think about.

Lido tomorrow seems such a long wait, had to buy new slippers today because old slippers had a cushion sole and felt as though I was walking on sharp stones ouch, new slippers are firmer so hoping feet calm down.

ED has to go to hospital on Fri unless baby appears before that, she also has appt on Tues, which means I will have to take GS to my doctor's appt because our appts are at the same time so that should be interesting haha.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Only a light dusting of snow here too. Very cold though. I was dressed up like the Michelin Man to wait for OH at swimming on Friday!

Are you snowed in, FF? Have you got enough bread and milk? It's only "panic buying" if you bought more than you could possibly consume in a month, otherwise it's "being sensibly prepared"

Thank you, Katy for the idea re selling the car. I looked into getting an online firm to come and take it off our hands. Their quote is considerably less than OH was hoping for (and they haven't seen the state of the interior yet - or the scratches on the paintwork) but we decided the hassle free option was probably the way to go. Selected the 2 companies with the best quotes/reviews and received a barrage of emails and phone calls to arrange valuation and/or collection. Then we discovered he's managed to lose the V5C registration document, so we've had to apply for a £25 replacement. Can't do anything until that arrives. In the meantime a local chap, out walking his dog, has spotted the For Sale signs in the car and has called to make enquiries, so we'll definitely be shot of it, one way or another, before too long. Can't wait, as it's in my way getting my car on and off the drive. I know as soon as its gone my car will break down though.

First reduced payslip this week. I was expecting it to be the last full-time one because I thought we were paid a month in arrears, so it was a bit of a shock. Hey ho. It's only money.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

I've had a snow day without any snow! Forecast today was an amber warning of heavy snow about 4 to 6 PM. I rang school ready to tell them that I wasn't going to go in but before I could say that, they were telling me not to risk it and stay home. Expected snow never arrived, so I could have gone but it is snowing now and forecast to be snowing most of the night.

NIpped out to tesco to "panic buy" some bread and milk.

.

How many times does " it'll do for now" remain a permanent fixture? My job at the school was just "for now" until I found another one. I'm still there eleven years on!

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

When my Mum sold her car she used one of those companies that come to the house and give you a price after examination, she did receive a reasonable price and it was no hassle at all

Saw Mum yesterday and she was looking very, very tired, she chatted away though and made me laugh, she always does.

Have a unit in the living room which I use as a divider, am not too fond of it as it was a "it'll do for just now" so have been looking for ages for something same size etc, the ones I have found are ridiculously expensive or DIY, soooooooooo had a brainstorm yesterday and bought canvas drawer things, they fit perfectly and give little unit a new lease of life, woo hoo!!

ED, nothing happening yet, she sees midwife tomorrow to make a date for being induced, baby is still sideways, she's obviously in no hurry...............

Feet, elbows and fingers are superly ouchy, but lido on Mon so not too long to wait now: xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Absolutely freezing here, but no snow, yet, and the forecast has now reduced the risk from 80% chance of heavy snow to 50% chance of light snow tonight,so I guess we'll escape it. Hope it either snows hard enough to shut school or not at all. This morning it was -8°C and I snapped my scraper trying to clear the car windows. It's OK, there's one in the other car. Couldn't open any of the doors. So I had to struggle with just the blade of the scraper. Nearly got frostbite in my fingers despite wearing leather gloves!

I have finally persuaded OH that we need to sell his car. He has put "For Sale" signs in it so I have taken photos ready to list it on a well known car trading website. He is, understandably, upset about it but I think he's beginning to realise it is the right decision. We don't need such a big car and I don't like driving - or parking - it. Keeping the thing charged, mould-free and saleable is a bit of a pain. Especially in all this cold weather.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Hope all went well with your check up FF and meds are working.

You do get such lovely things now JCJ.

Well, after much jittery nervousness, all went well with video, whew, was too busy concentrating to pay attention to filming!! Results after they have examined video, signed a paper stating it would be destroyed after they have viewed so no appearances on you tube hurrah.

Snow all over but none here, thank goodness. GS's daddy took over three hours to arrive here this morning, usual journey time is an hour.........xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Katy, I was knitting yesterday. Finished this hoodie for the baby - modelled by my favourite bear for YD's benefit.

About to start to design and knit antimacassers (or anti massacres, as I usually call them) for the arms of the sofa because the 17yr old leather is k***ered, cracked and leaking stuffing. The dog coat gave me an idea for how I might make them.

The new swimming app is pathetic. The longer challenges all have nothing to do with swimming - or even water!! - things like The London Marathon, The Three Peaks, Everest. Ridiculous! We'll need a LOT more rain before anyone can swim any of those. I'll finish the 45 mile round Jersey swim, recording my weekly swims myself, and then research other swimming apps - or even find out the lengths of other lochs/rivers and set my own challenges. How long is the lake in Benchland?!!

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

On the two tablets I've owned, FF, there is a key at the bottom of the keyboard that is labelled "123" or it could be "symbol" (or any abbreviation thereof) This opens another keyboard with numbers and symbols. There is an "abc" key to get back to the normal keyboard and, on mine, another key that goes to a third keyboard with other symbols. Hope that helps!!!

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Oh dear, now I cannot count asterisks and jump to wrong conclusions. I would not tell you to *** off either.

Why is there no apostrophe button on this tablet keyboard?

Babysat 4yr old GD for a little while this morning. Daughter had set her up on my laptop with Peter Rabbit games and then left to see her MIL. Game ended and needed changing to a new one......I did not know how to do this so GD showed me. She is 4, she knew what to do on a touch screen but my laptop has a mouse. I have the mouse skills that she does not but I had to be told what to do on a computer by a 4 yr old!

I am sitting on the I am a dinosaur bench!

Lovely and mild down here, no coat needed yesterday, coat on today as it is raining but still warm, yellow warning for wind tonight and tomorrow.

Eagerly awaiting your appearance on you tube Katy. Keep off your feet, plan ahead and I hope you get the appts back to times that give you the most pain relief.

Re: sdtop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Of course you'd never tell me to ****off, FF (and I think those sparkler words were Katy's, not yours!) which was why I suggested you might tell me to *** off. Subtle distinction.

Not sure where I am, KTC, because they've taken the website down so I don't have a map any more. I have 40km more to swim of a 70km circumnavigation. Not even sure, now, where I started, so I have no idea where I'll get back to. And I had to guess how far I'd already swum and do the maths myself each week. Grrrr!

I hope your lido gets back to more manageable installments. In the meantime, put those poor ouchy feet up and self medicate with creme eggs and other assorted delicious confectionary.

Hugs to your SIL's family, FF. I hope they don't have to spend too much longer watching Mum slowly fading. It's horrible for everyone. I'm with you, that I hope I go quickly. I lost both parents shockingly early and suddenly, but I can at least console myself that neither they or we had to suffer their gradual decline.

Not sure what I can BA to do today. I foresee a lot of sitting on the CBA bench and maybe some baby hoodie knitting and Blue tennis highlights. This part-time working was supposed to give me so much more time to do stuff but I don't know where it all goes. Will have to look in the lost plottery shed and under the CBA bench to see if it's hiding there.

Re: sdtop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

I don't know about that FF, have seen those words you spell out with the sparklers

Hope school is tidier today. Very sad about SIL's mother, am with you regarding a fast way out.

Have been in town today not for long though, should have seen the things that fell into my basket, creme eggs (plural) FR coconut sweets and a variety of cakes, am blaming it on the cold weather..............

My feet are killing me, lido not due for around a fortnight, will have to be very short journey times out and about, brings tears to your eyes.............lido appt has taken longer because of the change of depts, will have to phone or check when I get there that I will not have to wait this length of time again, so ouchy at the moment am holding my breath constantly. You forget how bad it really is

Re: sdtop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

JCJ as if I would ever tell you to **** off when you are trying to help me. Or indeed at any other time! Thank you for the help but as you say it seems to have disappeared. I have found a way to be here and although it might be a long way in, it is working and I am here.

Warmer here today, no scarf and coat unzipped again.

School a nightmare tonight , painting and cooking has been going on today. Very messy.

Bin lids frozen shut? That is cold! Fingers crossed for ED Katy, hope she has an easier time this time! Glad GS is now sleeping well, usually 3 months when colic improves.

SIL mother is still with us but deteriorating (surprised she has lasted this long). So hard for SIL to watch his Mother die by inches. A lot of the time she thinks he is her father, she is so very confused , she got so agitated today that they have had to sedate her. Makes me wish for a quick heart attack when my time is up but obviously not for many years yet!

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

FF, may I be so bold as to offer some techie assistance? Feel free to tell me to *** off. If you click or press on the pink "options" button in the top right corner of a new post you can select "bookmark". Then, whenever you are signed in you can click on "bookmarks" at the very top right of the page (next to the "sign in" tab if you aren't signed in!) and Benchland will be in the list that pops up. I've bookmarked all the threads I've posted on so I can quickly check if there are any replies - and I can always find my way back to BENCHLAND even after major techie activity!! Hope that helps. x

Beef Stew in the oven and jacket spuds. Just going to pop the dumplings in and steam some cabbage. Lovely winter warming food, even though it is actually a fair bit warmer today.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Well, I got lost on the tablet and then resorted to the laptop. That was much easier so I went back to the tablet and eventually sorted that too, I think! Took me about 45 mins. Wish the techies would think of those who are not so techie minded. Benchland has changed it's sub-forum and that completely threw me. But hey ho I'm here. But I'm replying on the laptop just in case ( also because I can type far more quickly on a proper keyboard!).

My kids were out today and built a small snowman, approx 1ft high after they had collected all the snow from the quite steeply sloping playground. I had a small covering of snow overnight, Daughter lives 3 miles away and had no snow, she was surprised when she came to mine. All gone by noon.

My coat was fully zipped up today Katy and a scarf was on, a scarf that can double as a snood if necessary.......and I was wearing gloves. It's flippin' cold down here now.

School nice and tidy tonight so not too onerous but back was hurting a bit, I put that down to going food shopping with Daughter and being on my feet for most of the day.

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Oooh! The techies have been hard at work in their cupboard again! We have a new look website. I hope everyone is managing to navigate it OK and no-one is lost in the woods. It's MUCH better for typing on my tablet - no gobbledegook anymore. Hurrah! Well done techies! Tea, biscuits, cake and glitterberry juice in the shed for you.

Enjoy your new bin, Katy. You've waited a long time for it. Even longer than FF had to wait for her hoover!! I love my kitchen bin It's a 3 section recycling bin that fits in a cupboard. It seemed very expensive, but I'm SO glad that we got it. It makes life so much easier - and tidier! What are we like?! Very glad your lurg has gone and you're feeling better.

I'm on the cream crackered bench: Long morning at school - kids in all day because the playground was "dangerous" - covered in ice and snow. Then I took OH to the water park for a very slow, cold walk (but no snow there, even though it's only about 8 miles from school) and tea and pineapple cake in the car watching the birds on the lake. Then we did the Sain*****'s shop after having dinner in the café Too much in one day! My bangers and mash were yummy though!

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Have had a yucky time, that awful cold and cough, then an infection in my toe, WHAT?? and finally fingers crossed that bug, not only visiting loo frequently but dizziness and nausea too, hurrah for me

Yesterday was ok then by evening it all started again, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

So many thanks for tonights yum yummy dinner.

Woo hoo a hoover, you will be glad, also happy your exercises seem to be making a difference FF.

Are you selling car JCJ? How lovely to be missed............

Still crazy, crazy here ED's baby due any day now, am excited, baby's head is still not engaged, she's obviously very comfy so there has been talk of being induced, hopefully not as ED had that with her eldest and she didn't like it one bit, so it's a wait and see. GS is doing well, big difference he has grown a lot in the last couple of weeks, amazing!!

Mum has been fine, but has had a couple of more falls paper stitches in her head and a bump to her forehead, she keeps taking the batteries out of the alarm thingy that alerts staff, bad mummy..........

Just purchased a new bin for kitchen all shiny and pretty, have meant to get a new one for years but it's always last thing on the list so am starting from bottom up this year haha xx

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Nope, not freezing, colder but I still haven't had to zip up the coat! Or put a scarf on! I had two for Xmas waiting to use them.....

Sorry you're feeling rough Katy, hope you feel better tomorrow.

Been taking it easy at work, you're right JCJ, no one will notice. They have however this week provided me with a new hoover (I reported the last one broken in Oct.). It is sooooo good that I have nearly eradicated all the glitter that has been stuck in the carpets for years. And the fact that I'm happy about a new hoover just shows how sad my life has become

Re: stop feeling guilty, small rant (BENCHLAND)

Not sure whether to be pleased you enjoyed your "mystery" Sunday dinner, FF, or insulted that you didn't recognise it was pork! And the crackling worked. Of course it did. Because I didn't even bother to try - just shoved it in the oven and set the timer! It never crackles properly when I Try to do it! I also made proper jam (homemade blackcurrant) roly poly and custard.

Glad your exercises seem to be helping. Keep on with them and be gentle with yourself at work. No-one but you will probably even notice if you have to do things slightly less perfectly!

Half way through January already! How did that happen? Gradually getting used to this part-time malarkey. Wednesdays are good because I no longer have to teach THAT class all afternoon. A child from that class stopped me yesterday, in the corridor, and told me she wished I was still teaching them because their new "teacher" shouts at them. I said "Didn't I shout?" (something I was accused of, and heavily criticised for) and she said, "No!" I have to admit I did a little fist pump victory dance inside. A member of staff said today that it's obvious I'm not there in the afternoons and I'm missed. That nearly made me head for the CSL bench!

Just got to train OH to communicate better, so I spend less time just hanging about waiting to see what he wants to do/where he needs taking to/bringing back from etc.

His car is full of **** from the garage to take to the tip. Then the car wouldn't start because it's been sat for months unused. (I don't like driving it because a) it's much bigger than my car and b) OH feels he needs to tell me how to drive it and gets so much more anxious, so he makes me nervous and therefore a worse driver) Also it was covered in mould because he left damp towels in there. I doused everything in white vinegar (where I could get at because it's still full of stuff for the tip) to get rid of the mould and the boyfriend of the teacher I work with kindly came to help us start it. Took it for a long run yesterday (and understood why he had opened the window wide - it absolutely stank of vinegar AND mould! )

I'm just off to the tip now. Gas mask on. Then I'm going to thoroughly clean the car - and install an air freshener!!