Friday, April 11, 2014

It should be Derek Selig and Bud Jeter. After all, the Yankee captain - listed as the 11th greatest leader in the world by Fortune magazine, in what is surely the most asinine poll ever concocted - is the ultimate buddy. Everybody loves him, even Yankee haters. He can doeth no wrong.

But really, like the commissioner, Captain Jeter is not so much a traditional leader as he is a cohesive force. He succeeded Cal Ripken as the perfect counterpoint to all the muscle-bound brutes who poisoned baseball. He’s not a slugger, not ever controversial. He’s polite, handsome and like Selig, Jeter - to use an old-fashioned term - is old-fashioned.

Yes, Selig was lucky that a better kind of ball yard was constructed in Baltimore. If Yankee Stadium was the house that Ruth built, Camden Yards would become the smaller, new condominium model for the sport all across the country. And yes, Selig was blind to steroids for far too long. But give him his due: When at last the mote fell from his eye, he acted with vengeance.

But then, too, Jeter caught on faster about something else. When Selig’s first wife left him, she told the court: From the day that Bud became involved in baseball, he divorced me and married baseball. Jeter, meanwhile, continues to romance a succession of beautiful women, but it is only to shortstop that he has ever been wed. For one more season: Take me out to the ballgame.

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The problem here is that Frank Deford is a sports romantic and there really isn't much romance left in sports. A primary culprit for that unfortunate development is Bud Selig. And so most sports romantics are left to cling to people like Derek Jeter and they're left with no way out but to distort his career and legacy beyond recognition.

An homage to them from someone like Deford is going to inevitably be a garbled mess, and not surprisingly this was.

Al these primmates can not see what Frank The Fork is saying so I must parapraise Al. You see there is a short stop for us Yanks and he is Jeter youve heard of him and also Bud Selleck. Well these 2 are a Madge maid in Heaven because they are guys who love base ball and chase Tale. And think of it Al wouldnt Ed Musky have been a grate President. Now when you go to tie a square knot you have two ends of Roap but they are both round and the hardest thing to do in base ball is that you cant Steel First Base. The problem with America is that you cant get a good Five Cent Cigar hell youre lucky to get out of the Cigar Shop without dropping a C note and thats before Sails Tacks. This is Frank the Fork for Empty R Radio saying if you cant get the USP in the hole just turn it around three times and enjoy the Masters every body.

I realize you would die in three days if you didn't have access to a bodega and mass transit, but Jesus. Pigs are mean and will bite anything they can get to. Not pleasantly, like that dom-for-hire girl that lives down in 242, but to remove it and eat it. You #### the sheep. Moron.

I realize you would die in three days if you didn't have access to a bodega and mass transit, but Jesus. Pigs are mean and will bite anything they can get to. Not pleasantly, like that dom-for-hire girl that lives down in 242, but to remove it and eat it. You #### the sheep. Moron.

Wait...are Derek Jeter and Bud Selig having an affair with each other?

Well...I have a very strange wife who insists her gaydar goes off the charts every time she sees Jeter. She says the endless procession of women is a cover...but what's in the gift baskets gives some of it away.

With both Jeter and Selig singing their swan songs this year I'm afraid we'll see a lot of nauseating articles like this one with people fawning all over them. Maybe they should just combine their names already and call them "JeSel".

I'm not sure which would be most upsetting to the Jeter-haters (detractors?), his succeeding Selig as Commissioner or fulfilling his ambition to own a MLB team (I hear the Mets have some money issues).

I'm not a strident Jeter hater; to me he's just another Damn Yankee. But there is something weird and plastic about him that I can't quite articulate. I just feel he's hiding something awful and of course I don't mean homosexuality, which is of course benign. Maybe something more Troy McClure-ish. I admit the gift basket stories inevitably remind me of Lavrentiy Beria's infamous bouquets. Yes, that's terrible of me but there it is. Maybe he's a Reptilian?

agree that jeter appears weird and plastic, and that, besides the media obsession with him for reasons i do not get, is why i don't like his persona

i mean, he IS a great player, but not the god he gets portrayed as

the media seems to pretty much ignore trout, they hate puig and snipe at harper. they complain about him no matter what he does. even when he first came up and stole hom against the PV who had plunked him to get him on base in the first place (which was great)

You guys do realize that the gift basket nonsense is based on a single NY Post Page Six item that relied on an anonymous "basket recipient" who was allegedly miffed at receiving the same basket twice, i.e. not being recognized the second time around? Could be true, but it's not exactly established fact.