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Can we do a ROLL CALL with everyone posting their name, cancer diagnosis, & where they are in treatment?

lindaprocopio

Posts: 2022
Joined: Oct 2008

Mar 26, 2009 - 9:04 pm

We have so many wonderful new people posting and I have been so busy with treatments and trying to keep my head above water at work. I am afraid I haven't really welcomed everyone (I APOLOGIZE; you can't possibly KNOW how glad I am that you all have found us!), and I am having trouble keeping everyone straight in my poor chemo-brained head.

So could you each just post under this thread with the name you'd like us to call you, what your cancer diagnosis is (if you have it yet), and where you are in your treatment. And if you want to say where you live, that would be cool too. I'll start it off:

Linda Procopio:
Stage III-c UPSC, radical hysterectomy 10/10/09; just finished 6 rounds of carboplatin/paciltaxol (sp?); with 8 weeks of radiation coming up after I recover from the chemo. I live in central Pennsylvania.

My name is Gloria. I just rec'd pathology report from D&C that showed Uterine Cancer, Grade 3 clear cell. Gyn/Oncologist says removing all female parts and removal of lymph glands to to heart. Level to be determined and then immediate chemo. Alone & Terrified.

Welcome to the site, but so sorry you are joining our journey. I can certainly understand the terror you are feeling. When I was first diagnosed I read things on the internet and they were so scary, but most of what I read was old statistics. They are making such progress with the treatment of cancer. I know I was terrified of the side effects of chemo. But that was something that never happened. I got pre-medication and meds to take after the chemo, and never had any problems.

Just try to take one day at a time. Ask questions when you have them. I am glad you have a gyn/onocologist to do your surgery. They will be able to do proper staging to determine your stage of cancer. I have III-C and had 21 lymph nodes removed.

Does the hospital you are going to have your surgery have any support groups. When you are in the hospital you might ask to talk to a social worker that can help you with issues you have..... family care, financial concerns and support for you.

Good luck with your surgery. We are here for you, so you are not alone.

Gloria....I know how shocking the news must be to you! There are sooo many wonderful folks on this site that can offer you lots of good information and helpful suggestions. I wish this site had been active when I was first diagnosed. I have learned so much in the short time I have "checked back in"

Try to spend a little time everyday, an hour if possible, NOT thinking about cancer! Spend time doing something that is relaxing....a nice bath with candles, listening to music, spending time in a park, etc.... Dealing with all of the things you are trying to handle must be very draining and taking a little time for yourself can be reguvenating.

The suggestion to ask to see a social worker is a great one....they are a wealth of information! I also agree that the chemo treatments were very "do-able"....they medicate you prior to the treatment so nausea and vomiting was not an issue for me. Keep asking questions!

I understand the alone and terrified feeling. I have had UPSC stage IIIc since july 2010. Same as you, all female parts removed and some lymph nodes Sept 2010. I keep fighting the nasty beast and so will you.

Time to take a deep breath. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. Most of us posting here have been where you are and can well remember the terror and dispair. Believe me that this is all MUCH more do-able and survive-able that you think right now. You have an aggressive type of cancer cell and you will want that chemo following your surgery. But for now, focus on your upcoming surgery. Will a gynecologic oncologist be doing the surgery? That is my strongest recommendation at this juncture; you need your surgeon to be a gyn-onc, even if you have to travel a little distance. I have 25 lymph nodes removed along with my hysterectomy, so I know what you are facing here.

If you really feel alone, check with the American Cancer Society about any support groups that may be in your area. And we are here to help with any questions you may have.

Have an GYN/Oncologist who comes highly recommended. Am fortunate enough to have a great medical team. As for the emotional part of this, so far this has been the only forum that is active that I've found so far. No support groups nearby, so internet will be it. It all happened last week and now they want to do this enormous surgery this week. Trying to wrap my arms around it is difficult to say the least. Not even sure if it's worth fighting??? Sounds kind of hopeless on alot of sites. Diminished quality of life, financial ruin, etc. Guess I'm just overwhelmed...... Generally a very positive person....but this.....

I understand how shell shocked you must be. I have found that there are lots of very helpful and supportive people on this site. I think that it is well worth the fight. This is the second different cancer that I have had and it just metasticized (not sure of sp). And this has put MORE fight into me. I won't say that everything is rosy all the time and your quality of life may be diminished for a time but it is not a permanent things. I can relate to the financial issues but that too will pass. Just take things one day at a time (I sound like a sports coach) and one of these days, things will improve. You will be in my prayers.
Pat

shell-shocked is a good description. raw is another. so many worries. worried about how to tell/take care of my very elderly parents and how to take care of my dog & 2 kitties. worried about keeping my job; worried about the financial issues; and, sheepishly, worried about losing my hair and looking even worse. I'm already very very thin and bald will be really hideous.

I was just diagnosed this month with Grade III uterine cancer. Surgery just was scheduled for June 29. Lots of worries here too. Lots of faith also! We were pretty shocked all last week, but it has settled in more. Now we are ready for the fight. Give yourself a little time. You will settle into the battle too.

It is hard when you have people like your parents who depend on you. When you feel ready, start reaching out to everyone in your sphere to help you with them. If you can be specific in their needs to the helpers, it works better. I have two elderly parents and three children in my home. My husband is good but he cannot do it all. We need people from the outside to help us too! My pastor says it actually is good for the helpers too.

I was diagnosed last March with Stage IIIC Grade 11. I was crying and scared to get the news from the phone call from Gyn about the results from biosphy. I was informed that before operation they said that I had "pre-cancer" but then after operation with pathology report that I'm on stage IIIc which is unexpected. I informed the news to my family and friends at work. Surprisely, many of my co-workers had going through cancer in their lives before and shared it with me so I don't feel alone anymore. You will be surprise how many people who are willing to be there for you to help even though I didn't ask for help. Don't be afraid to speak up...they are willing to pray for you and make you feel stronger again.
hugs, Reddie

My daughter Angela, had cancer surgery July 8th, 2010 on her 38th birthday. She is married with three small children. She is out in California and will be treated at U.C. Davis Medical center. We all live in Texas. There is no family out there that is able to help. We will be flying back and forth. Her cancer is undifferentiated/endometriod 3c cancer. She is still iln the hospitall, but my be released today. Her wonderful mother-in-law, Mary, is two doors down in the same hospital with ovarian cancer IV and is not doing well. This is really hard on Angela. I really need to hear from somebody that has the same condition and doing well. Angela will start very aggressive treatment in two weeks. Linda

Hi. My name is Shelly. I was diagnosed with stage 1B uterine cancer in Jan 09 and had a abdominal hysterectomy also removing lymph nodes and ovaries in Feb. 09 @ Hoag, Newport Bch, CA. Currently in the 3rd month of chemo (carbo/taxol) 3 times a month for six months and once a month 9 months after. I am also having to get both shots for red blood cells and white blood cells. (sorry I forgot what their names are)
I have had 2 bladder infections so far and am not getting very much sleep. Most nights I wake up every 1 to 1 1/2 hours. I am very tired all the time and am not sure what is due to the chemo. After trying to treat the bladder problem my oncologist has requested a referral to a urologist but OMG they are hard people to get to see!
My family and friends are very supportive but I am really getting tired of being tired all the time! Has anyone else had this problem and what did you do?
Thanks!

Hello Shelly,
I was diagnosed with uterine cancer stage 2B, grade 3.
I am just about to finish my last chemo treatment this Friday July 22, 2011.
I had a radical hysterectomy, including removal 58 lymph nodes. The lymph nodes were all clean, but the tumor in the uterus invaded the cervix wall.
Any way, the only treatment my doctor recommended was chemo, taxol/carboplatin.

It is very normal to feel tired after chemo, however, please talk to your doctor as soon as you have a chance. In regard to not being able to sleep well, it could be the steroids they might be giving you with each treatment. I was given steroids every time I had chemo for about 3 months. After that, apparently the protocol changed and I only got it the first day of each cycle, which is was also when I had both chemicals (taxol and carboplatin).

My doctor prescribed me AMBIEN, but it did not work for me at all. I still take it, and it works some. I do to have a hard time going to sleep. I take 1 AMBIEN before bed, and when I wake up 3 or 4 hours later I take an anti-anxiety pill.
Are you currently working?

I am guessing you did not do too bad with the infections, since that could have delayed your treatments and you have not mention anything about it.

Please don't ever say that it is hopeless! There is always hope, and that is what you must hold on to now! It is all overwhelming, especially in the beginning. I was told at one point that the internet is one of the last places to look for information. Be sure when you are reading on the internet that you are looking to see how current the information is. I have a hard time finding much that is less than 2 years old. 2 years is really old in the world of cancer research. Anyway... YOU are not a statistic. There is only ONE who can decide when it is your time. No doctors or statistics are going to determine when the Lord takes you home. Please don't allow cancer to have power over you!!!
Please consider getting and reading a book called "There's No Place Like Hope" by Vickie Girard. I just read it a couple of weeks ago, but wish I would have had it when my journey began. It is excellent and very easy read, even if you are not much of a reader.
Good health and God be with you as you go through and heal from your surgery. Take one hurdle at a time. And believe that you are not alone! The Lord is walking with you through this journey and myself and all of the wonderful ladies on this site are here for you.

Hi Gloria. When I got my initial diagnosis in February 2006, I too was shocked, but couldn't find anyone with UPSC. After a few days I told people at work and where I live. One neighbor volunteered to walk the dog, another to drive me home from the hospital. My boss was very supportive and the office manager reviewed my sick leave and vacation time with me. I had laproscopic surgery, took three weeks off work (I think I could have done it in two). I'm a secretary, so my work is sedentary. I was able to work through chemo, just taking the actual chemo day off work, usually a Thursday. Friday would be ok, Saturday I would feel sick, weak. Sunday not very good either. I had the option of going to work on Monday or not and I don't think I missed any Mondays. I bought two wigs, but often just wore a scarf. American Cancer Society had a program "Look Good, Feel Better" that gives you some free cosmetics, shows you some ways to tie scarfs fashionably, and I did that and started using cosmetics again for the first time in 30 years (I was 70 years old in 2006). About 4 weeks after surgery I was riding my bicycle part of the way to work again, same as I had before diagnosis. The help and support I got from many people around me was very good for me. And it was nice that in the law office where I worked, we had a client, cancer patient who had been fired, bring suit and win. Good luck to you in your scary journey and may you be "Dancing with NED" (no evidence of disease) this time next year. Mary Ann on San Francisco Bay

I felt the same way when dignosised in Jan. But surgery external and internal radiation and now life is getting back to normal. This site was only support group i could find. Even at the cancer center where i was treating i was only one with "my type" of cancer. It can be very scary but some times we need to face the scary stuff to get on with life. Good luck Gloria
Lisa

When I joined this "Sisterhood" in January I was the 10th person to sign on with UPSC. I have Stage III-C, as do many others. Now we have close to 60 "Sisters" who have signed on for themselves or family members. I know I have found this site to be so helpful to me as I go on this journey. I am amazed at the strength and courage that so many of our "Sisters" have displayed. I am touched by the caring words that I have received and reading the encouragement and helpful suggestions given to others. We have had many different treatment plans, but basically the same drugs and radiation. Some are finished with their treatments, and others are closing in on the end of their treatments. We have had many who are dancing with "NED". I hope to join that dance with others. Thank you everyone for everything, and may we continue to be an encouragement to others who find themselves on this difficult journey. BIG HUGS to all of you.

It is good that 60 women have found this discussion board (too bad it is necessary tho). When I was diagnosed with UPSC, my gyn/onc told me what I had was very rare. At one appointment she said something about my cancer being a 'oddball'. I hated that! It makes you feeling so alone. Which is why I was so happy to find this site. I am not an oddball here. Just one of the gang. Keep the faith!

Hello, I am Diane Smail from Yorktown Virginia. I joined the group in April but had a reaction to taxol and the first four treatments took up all my time. We were also renovating part of our house when all this hit when I had the reaction so everything was wild. My Gyn/Onc did develop a good supportive regimen for me (lots of steroids, pain meds, tranquilizers, etc) and I was able to keep up taxol/carbo recommended doses. I get #5 this week.

I think I am stage I but it's close to a II and I had endometroid with a 2 cm serous papillary cancer. My nodes were negative but washings positive. I will also have radiation.
I had breast cancer almost ten years ago chemo, radiation and lumpectomy and have done well. I did take tamoxifen and I think that is what caused this cancer. Personally I would get a hysterectomy if I had to take tamoxifen again. Live, learn and pass it on. I think I have grown since my last treatment but still struggle with fears and anxieties. I did adjust to the baldness better. I love to walk into chemo with my wig, dressed in a cute outfit,and smiling. It surprises the nurses. Then I salute them and tell them I am reporting for duty. I appreciate all this group has to offer. My dream would be to have a site for UPSC like breastcancer.org. They have guest speakers, etc. Research is posted. It's a wonderful site. Check it out. Sometimes dreams come true!

Hi all,
I've been a lurker for a while but now have posted so I thought I'd log in on this great idea called the Roll Call!
I am 45 years of age and have endometrial adenocarcinoma of the uterus (stage 3), ovaries (stage 1), and cervix (stage 1). There was also a little clear cell in one of the ovaries. Abdominal wash was positive and lymph nodes weren't sampled as I didn't have an obgyn/onc do my surgery. My gyno did the surgery himself and didnt tell me about the obgyn/onc until after my surg. The ob/onc opted to not go back and take out the lymph nodes. Oh, my CT and pet CT were clear.
Treatment has been 6 rounds of carbo/taxol 3 weeks apart. I'm finished with that and now I will be undergoing 25 rounds of radiation and 3 brachys.
You ladies all sound so wonderful and it's been a pleasure to read your stories and see your support of each other. I hope we're all around for a long, long, long time!

Hello! I was diagnosed last August 7th with uterine cancer at 46 years old. I got my diagnosis on a Thursday, and was having my robot surgery the next Wednesday. I felt so fortunate that I didn't have to linger wondering and waiting too long.

My doctor removed everything including "a little bit of the vagina" as he put it lol. My ovaries and cervix were clean (as was the "little big of vagina") It was found in 2 of the 47 or so (I don't remember now) lymph nodes that were checked.

I did the sandwich of three rounds of chemo (I was in the hospital for the 4 days of treatment - does/did any one else do this? I found it to be so difficult to be in the hospital). Three internal rads and then 25 cycles of of external radiation, finishing up with my last three treatments.

My doctor permitted me to do the last round in the clinic at the end of March instead of the hospital since I'd tolerated the chemo so well (and I promised to drink tons of water!) I was so grateful.

So happy to start to have some hair back! I felt this was very private to me and only chose to tell very close friends and family - so I'm still sporting a wig when I go out in the summer weather - these things are HOT!

I go for my first 3 month check July 20th. I feel so great and healthy, but it's hard not to be a bit freaked out that it's back somewhere. My CA 125 number was 4 in April, it's not going to take much for it to double which is when the red flag goes up!

Welcome to this site. I am sorry to hear your diagnosis, but I have found positive support from everyone here. I am happy for you finishing your treatments. What a relief! I am glad that you are feeling great and hope for positive news for you on your 3 month check up. I understand how you feel with the fear that your cancer will return somewhere else. I try to think positve and stay busy, but it seems to be always in the back of my mind. I take one day at a time. I hope that you find peace and enjoy your summer.

Great CA125 number - 4!!! terrific. I got down to an 8. My dr. said "don't freak out if it goes to 11" - well it sure did next time but now back down to an 8 without any more treatment. So I imagine it vacillates a bit and I think normal is anything below 35 or so. We have a bit of wiggle room.

I just had my 2nd post treatment check-up and was told the WE are the best indicators if there is something amiss - any change in intensity, duration, or frequency of symptoms. Any change for 2 weeks is a concern for us.

Thank you for your reassuring, common sense words Mary Ann! I feel really great - I've been back to using my elliptical after being sedentary for over a year. Have a good energy level, have no symptoms, see myself building up and working harder on my machine - and yet I have moments of such panic when I think about this upcoming appointment on Monday. I keep telling myself I need to get a grip, and I can't get like this each time a three month check comes along! Trying to keep only positive thoughts until I am told otherwise.

Sorry for your diagnosis, but glad you are doing so well with your treatents. I too had the robotic surgery and had the sandwich treatments. I did well with the first three treatments. Had my external and internal radiation and had some nausea with the treatments, but have a sensitive stomach. I had chemo number 4 and my white blood cells count dropped and I had an infection and ended up in the hospital for a week with IV antibiotics. Then 12 more days of antibiotics at home. Finally was able to get chemo #5 yesterday, and hope it will be uneventful like the first 3 were. I know what you mean about the wig being hot. I pretty only wear mine when I go to church, otherwise I wear a ball cap or newsboy cap when I go out. Good luck with you checkup on the 20th. I hope all goes well for you. In peace and caring. HUGS to you.

Hello My name is Kathy, 57 with endometrial adenocarcinoma Stage 1, Grad 2-3. Had the DaVinci surgery last Mon at ElCamino Hspital in Mountain View. My Doc is reccomending taxol/carbo..for 3 cycles as a precaution. Am scared and nervous about side effects and having to work as an LVN during treatment in an Internist office. Scared about being exposed to something while being immunosuppressed and nervous about wearing a wig. This is a small office and my boss is not very supportive. Not sure where I will have my treatment. Either at Stanford or near the hospital I had surgery. Have my followup appointment next Mon. To make life more complicated, last year my husband was diagnosed with Stage 4 colon cancer..adenocarcinoma also. Did very well with chemo and surgery, but had return of cancer in his liver and new spots in his lung I have found this site extremely helpful and supportive, with some extremely educated, caring women. Thank you all for being there for us struggling.

Hi Kathy! I'm sorry to hear that any employer, least of all an internist would not be supportive of you during treatments for cancer. That guy (or gal) needs a good shaking. You are obviously not new at all of this (I'm sorry for that). You have so much on your plate right now trying to figure out what's next. Take one step at a time, and worry about your boss later. I hope you will get good advise along the way on how to handle working while your counts are at their lowest. (Perhaps your boss will come around when it's time).

Speaking as someone who has not dealt with the hair loss all that well, there are some great looking wigs! I've had numerous compliments from people on my "new hairstyle" - they are completely unaware that I am wearing a wig!

Thanks Kat for your kind words. I keep hearing wigs are so hot, and I already get hot easily. More importantly, I need to work and am hoping the chemo will go smoothly. Will take your great advice and just enjoy each day we are given and try to live it to the fullest.

Under "normal" conditions I don't feel like my wig is hot. Outside in the summer heat - I'd have to say yes! I'd like to whip that thing off and let my head breathe! lol In an office atmosphere I'd like to think you'll be ok.

Hoping your treatment will leave you feeling well enough to keep your work schedule!

Sorry to hear of your diagnosis, but glad you have only stage 1. Glad you will only have to have 3 cycles of the Taxol/carbo treatments. I can understand you being scared about the side effects. I think we all worried about them and found out they were not as bad as we had anticipated. The fear of the unknown always seems to be worse that what actually happens. They do such a good job with pre-medications and post medications that the side effects are minimal. Of course you won't really believe all of this until you go through it yourself. That's all natural. Sorry you have fears of being exposed to to patients coming in to see the doctor. I am an RN so I know what you mean. What about a Family Medical Leave, can you qualify for that while you get your chemo? Or any type of disability for that time period? You certainly have you hands full with your husband's diagnosis to. You will be added to my prayer list. Good luck with your treatment, and feel free to vent any frustrations or fears and ask all the questions you want. Someone will have some answers for you. In peace and caring. HUGS to you.

What a nice post you left. I'm not sure if I have ever met such a nice, caring group of women. I will heed all of your great advice. As far as a Family medical leave or disability; I am still off work from the surgery..1 month. And my GYN/ONC wants me to start the chemo soon. My office is very small; just 3 Docs with 3 nurses and no backup help. I work with a Doc that is somewhat narcissistic and he gets quite upset when I am off. It's a concierge practice, thus my worries about looking ill or someone noticing I have a wig on. But if it comes down to working or my health, I have decided I will not hesitate to take a leave. Your info about the pre and post meds I should know, as I sat through all of my husband's chemo. I guess when it's about "you" things are easily forgotten. Now that I realize there are many out there with lots of info to share, I am going to take advantage of all of your wisdom and caring. Thank you so much for all you wonderful women do on this site. Best to you also, RO.

I worked during my chemo and hated wearing a wig. I advise that you ask your oncologist about working in the setting you describe. Mine said "good" when I told him I was working - I'm a clinical social worker - I probably was not as exposed as you to the general public. I think we need to be practical but not paranoid or else we will make ourselves sick emotionally. I ditched the wig and went to work and everywhere else BALD. It eventually was "normal". I wish you the best with your treatment. Hang in there and be strong. You will do fine.

Thanks for your response, Mary Ann. I would love to just go bald. The Doc I work with would absolutely freak out. He has a concierge practice, which says it all! My face is very chubby and I doubt I would look as cute as you, from the great picture you have. I will ask my oncologists...I have 2 now, to pick from, about working. Pretty much have to work with this economy and my husband's cancer, with a possible layoff next week. Like I said before...many twists and turns in our lives. Just trying to get through each day with the most info about my disease and treatment options. I am so happy I found this site and have gotten all this positive feedback. Be well, mary Ann! Kathy

I am not sure if I am replying to this right.. My name is Danielle I am a 30 year old single mother of four. I was diagnosed with uterine cancer and will have a hystrectomy (if i spelled it right) august 4th

Am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. Know you have a full plate with also having 4 children to care for. Am so glad you connected with this site. There are so many knowledgeable and caring women who are here to share info and support each other. Ask lots of questions. Are you having a gyn oncologist do your surgery?

my Gyn is doing the surgery. I really trust her she delivered two of my children and one of those was by an emergancy c- cection and My son and I turned out fine then..She wanted to try to preform the surgery vaginaly but a friend of mine who is a gyn doc said she should just go through the c-cection scar to avoid any complications. I also know that on august 4th i will be on my period and I am such a heavy bleeder ( which started the symptoms) and have become anemic because of the heavy bleeding for a year and that scares me alot getting this done. I will be seeing an oncologist afterwords to make sure that they did get everything since it only seems to be in the lining of the uterus. I will see her the 27th for pre op but not sure what questions i need to ask since this is all so much. I am scared of surgery in general I guess the whole thing of dying while being but to sleep and not knowing anyone who has been through this. As for the treatment afterwords I am not worried I can get through that whatever it may end up being. thanks for replying to me it does make me feel better talking to those who have been through this

Hi Danielle and welcome to this discussion board. I am sorry to hear that you are going through this. I think you will probably feel so much better after having the hysterectomy. I know how tiring being anemic can be. If I may offer... research has shown a greater success rate in patients who have a gyn/onc do the debulking and staging surgery. I know you trust your gyn to deliver your babies, but the gyn/onc specializes in this area.
I will pray that you will soon be on the road to recovery and back to your life with your kids!
May God Bless you!

Good luck with your surgery. Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I hope you are having an gyn/onocologist do you surgery, so proper staging can be done. That is so important so you know what you are dealing will. I hope all goes well for you. Being a single mother of four has to be enough of a challenge for you without going through all of this. I wish you the best. Feel free to vent your feeling and ask all the questions you may have. In peace and caring. HUGS to you.

Welcome to this site. I am sorry to hear about your diagnosis. The ladies here have been very helpful and encouraging to me. I know that you have a lot going on now with your upcoming surgery, but we are here for you. Try to take it one day at a time. You and your family are in my prayers.

MY NAME IS JEN ILENE AND AM 30 YEARS OLD, DIAGNOSED WITH STAGE 1B UTERINE ADENOCARCINOMA. IM FROM SOUTH TEXAS, NOT A LOT OF SUPPORT GROUPS HERE. WAS DIAGNOSED OCT 16,2008 AND HAD TOTAL ABD HYSTERECTOMY AND RIGHT OVARY REMOVAL(PCD)AND BILATERAL FALLOPIAN TUBE REMOVAL(SEVERE ENDOMETRIOSIS)IN LATE JANUARY 2009. MY CA-125 CAME OUT ALITTLE HIGH AND FOUND POSSIBLE REOCCURANCE DURING HYSTOSCOPY LAST FRIDAY. NOW TRYING TO PREPARE FOR 4 WEEK ROUND OF EXT.RAD AND POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS. HOW BAD IS IT? IS THERE ANY SUPPORT SYSTEM SET UP FOR PEOPLE MY AGE? PLEASE CONTACT (JEN.ILENE.G@GMAIL.COM) OR ON THIS POST. THANKS

Sorry for you diagnosis but glad it is Stege 1 B. I had my 28 external radiaiton treatments and a 28 hours internal radiation treatment. I had minimal diarrhea from the treatments. I did have nausea from the radiation but I have a sensitive stomach. I only know one other person who had the nausea. The humiliation of having the radiation in the area you are having it was not as bad as anticipated either. The radiation people were very professional. I hope you have a good experience. Good luck with your treatments. Feel free to ask any questions. In peace and caring. HUGS to you.

thanks for responding and for your help. i heard rad is worse than chemo, and watched my grandmother struggle with her uterine cancer and continuous chemo treatments, so im kind of scared of how bad it really will be. i guess im really struggling with the fact that im going thru all this. its hard to talk to my fiancee or family about this. i feel like theyre being burdened. and the truth is, i think i'm taking this so hard because ive been isolating myself from everyone, trying to spare them and yet,trying not to feel so alone. i guess i just want everyone to come around and say that they are in it with me and not going anywhere, as opposed to the "if i dont see it it isnt really there" attitude people in south texas have, and my family especially. i tried to find support groups in my area and only found one. It was sponsored by a local hospital, but it was like going to a seminar on breast cancer awareness, which is okay but not what i need. im just tired from what i thought was 6 months of worry and doctors, but now seems never ending. is it just me and my bad coping skills that is making it this hard, or is it like this for everyone? i feel so overwhelmed lately, worrying about my little boy and his future, about what this is doing to my parents, about my siblings and about being too tired or in too much pain to have a normal life with my fiancee. i see everyone frustrated with me not being myself, but its like im not allowed to tell them im scared or anything, because thats just being negative or feeling sorry for myself. i guess my question is.... how long am i expected to be in treatments, until i can say im cancer free? did you go thru this for years or is it more recent? do you have a strong support system? are their resources for emotional support? am i just going insane and handling the whole thing really wrong? thanks for letting me vent and for replying yesterday. it helps to not feel so alone. all my love . . . jen

You are struggling and it's understandable with all the uncertainty you are feeling.

It helped me to talk to a counselor - someone objective. My work has an EAP program and we can get many sessions free. Perhaps talking to someone a professional would help you process your feelings - in addition to this site and other support groups in your area.

I remember making a conscious decision early on to NOT just be a CANCER PATIENT. I think this helped me get back into my routine quicker which in turn helped me in my treatment.

Jen,
I am so sorry that you are going through all of this. My doctor told my family from the very beginning that they needed to let me feel and vent whatever feelings I was having. He told me not to hold back the emotions, that I needed to express them for my own well being. I still have good days and bad days and there are a lot of days I feel like I need someone to talk to besides my family. You might check at the cancer center that you go to. The one I go to has a psychologist just for the cancer patients. I never have gone, but have considered it several times. You might check into that. Oh, and you can vent her any time. It's okay for you to feel, angry, anxious, scared... even negative and feel sorry for yourself sometimes. You are young and cancer is scary and quite frankly depressing!! There are so many unknowns and you are so young and this has suddenly changed your whole life. You have every right to have all of those emotions and feelings and many more! You are not alone.
Love and Hugs! hang in there.

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