When in doubt, tell the truth. Google the hell out of it to get basic knowledge, make sure you've got the owner's manual for the specific stove you're to become an expert on, and spin it a bit: "You know, Charlie, I don't have any experience on your particular stove, but with my other experience and the owner's manual, you and I are BOTH going to become experts." If you're lucky, he'll supply the beer.

I'm supposed to show someone how to use and maintain a pellet stove, but I've never used nor maintained one. Can anyone make me look smart here?

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I've had mine for over 4 years now. What do you need to know exactly?
Here are some tips:

1. Only use premium pellets
2. There are several ways to light one if stove doesn't have starter.
3. Empty bag to fill up hopper up to capacity. (usually 40 lb bag)
4. Flu should be cleaned as with wood stove. (buy flexible rod and brush from dealer)
5.Once a year: Open door/panel where electronics are and very gently vacuum circuit boards/controls etc with
shop vac or regular vac with hose)
6. Only use qualified Pellet stove technicians. These are complicated devices.
7. Don't freak out if the hopper "screw" feeder jams on occasion. It happens
even on the best units available.
8.if the stove doesn't have a starter-gel starter is available
9. If hopper dumps too many pellets and extinguishes combustion, simply lower the setting.
10. After lit-leave it alone. When turning stove OFF the fan will continue to operate for 15-20 minutes. This is normal-safety feature.
11. Ash pan does NOT need to be emptied daily. I only empty mine about once per month. You may need to do it more frequently.
12. Stove is equipped witha "pull rod" that scrapes some internal ash that you cannot get to.

We have another pellet shortage this year. If you can afford it-buy an entire pallet. I buy around 10 bags at the time for storage reasons.
When pellets are available-buy-buy-buy before you need them!
If you don't keep a good supply-you will be spending some chilly nights!

The person I need to help is moving into a new house that has one of these, so I don't even know what it looks like. I don't know if it is self-lighting or if I need to light it. I don't know if the pellets are fed from the top or the bottom. I don't know if it has a thermostat of some kind or not.

I would like to be able to get the thing lit for her and make sure that the flu and ash pan are clean. What are the different ways you can light it? Do you need one of those long lighters or matches, and, if so, where exactly do you place the lit end of the match? Also, how do you clear out a jammed screw feeder. At what point does the fan go on? Do you light it first and then plug it in?

The person I need to help is moving into a new house that has one of these, so I don't even know what it looks like. I don't know if it is self-lighting or if I need to light it. I don't know if the pellets are fed from the top or the bottom. I don't know if it has a thermostat of some kind or not.

I would like to be able to get the thing lit for her and make sure that the flu and ash pan are clean. What are the different ways you can light it? Do you need one of those long lighters or matches, and, if so, where exactly do you place the lit end of the match? Also, how do you clear out a jammed screw feeder. At what point does the fan go on? Do you light it first and then plug it in?

Thanks

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Plug it in first. It probably has an automatic starter so dont worry about it. If not PM me and I'll give you details of all lighting options. Easiest is put a hand full of pellets into
the burning recepticle and put lighting Gel on pellets (in burn tray) NOT IN HOPPER. as instructed on bottle.Turn fan on after you have it lit. thats it..

The burn tray looks like an ashtray with holes in it. (pellets drop into tray) Use regular size match to light it if using gel.

Most/Many models do not have a thermostat. That is generally an option.
Pellets are fed from the top.
I am sending you PM Verdeboy. I can explain this simple procedure better.
Very easy-much safer than wood stove--it has auto-shut down.

**After lit make sure to turn feed/hopper switch "on".**
It is probably a separate switch.

Most of the time if the screw jams you will have to call the technician.
On my model some expensive circuit boards need to be removed to gain access to the screw. Personally...? I'm not comfortable doing it myself.
My tech charges 50-75 dollars to clear it. It has happened about once every 2 years.

This does Not mean you have a "lemon". It just happens.
Just because your toilet gets clogged doesn't mean you have a bad toilet.

Dealers will tell you it's because you aren't buying their pellets. yea...right.
It's caused by a build up of residual sawdust and/or clinkers.

Done right, there is very little creosote with a pellet stove. Some of them come with or can be fitted with a catalytic converter to help remove some of the nasties from the flue gasses.

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First I've heard about it Jim and it's worth looking into. I'm not aware of any stoves here that fitted with a CC. Reason being is the effiency is around 98.5 compared with traditional wood stove at around 50-70%