In keeping with the previous post, I thought I’d put together a gift guide for the person who likes to give practical things. Me? I love giving people things, but I hate buying people things; mostly because I like to buy things people will actually use but end up not being the most “present-worthy” or “appropriate for the department gift exchange.” Tuh!

I decided that instead of working against my urge to get people what they’ll actually use, this year I plan to really lean into it – gift exchange propriety be damned.

For the best friend you’re “in sync” with:

photo from Thinx

One to a few pairs of Thinx because they’re awesome (use this link for $10 off your first order!). If you’ve had the conversation about menstrual cups, toss one into the package too. My favorite is the MeLuna.

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For your overachieving sister:

A membership to the Working Women’s Club or its local equivalent wherever she lives. If she ends up doing something really cool as a result, you can officially take credit for it afterward.

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For your coworkers that you like, but are reticent to give overly “nice” gifts to because that might get weird and you’ll have to become friends, but, like, oddly distant friends who have easy conversations and might go out to drinks, but it feels really awkward when you do because you don’t know how real the friendship is:

photo from Glossier

Glossier flavored balm dotcom 4 pack. Because you can cover four people with one gift and they can talk to each other about how amazing each of the different flavors are, leaving you room to duck out of the back entrance just before happy hour. New to Glossier? Use this link for 20% off your first order. *glitter toss*

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For the friend you go out with that loves to watch makeup tutorials on YouTube:

While you’re on the Glossier site, grab some Haloscope and Boy Brow for this friend. They’re the fastest and easiest ways to look like you actually did something even if you still don’t understand contouring or where the hell “the crease” is, or if your eyebrows are uneven when you try to get them “on fleek” (is this even still a thing? I used to call them “baddie brows” but that didn’t catch on). Tell her she’s going to look like a glazed doughnut. She’ll know what you mean.

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For a male best friend / a male relative / man you’re currently with:

A pack of underwear. If he plays sports, a pair of these would be even better. They always need underwear because everything they have is somewhere between ratty and close to disintegrating. You can add a pair of fun socks to lessen his shock that you intuitively knew about the state of his underwear drawer.

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For your relative with anxiety and/or ASMR:

photo from Bodhisattva

A Tibetan singing bowl – just trust me on this. If you don’t think it will go over well, send this instead with a note saying that “really cool things will happen if you sit down in a comfortable spot, close your eyes, and listen to this.” Chances are they’ll mellow out, have those weird brain tingles, or fall asleep. No bad options there.

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For the kid who lives down the hall/street and is always petting your dog too hard:

A PEZ dispenser shaped like whatever thing the youth find interesting, or, if older, a fidget toy. It’s the productive way to keep idle hands off your pet and, potentially, your hands off of the kid.

Last month was binge season. I like to think I didn’t do too much damage, but I did and I felt good doing it. I owe those good feelings to my budgeting software and relative discipline while using it in preparation for this season; it’s important to know these things about oneself.

The blazer and boots have been knocking around my head since 2013. Through luck, timing, and the powers of Poshmark and a chance web search that led me to the last single stockist of the last pair of what would be my size in these boots, they knock no more. Special thanks to the Cyber Monday deal that netted an extra 25% off the price. Glossier’s Boy Brow is about as important as soap to me and the bodysuit is one of those things I have to try out just to say that I tried it. My hope is that it will make a decent layering piece now and a summer option when I tire of wearing the same three t-shirts.

There is a point when you admit that buying the thing won’t make anything better. You know you shouldn’t for several reasons involving budgets and responsibility and the upcoming holiday season. You know it won’t resolve the issues underlying the knot in your stomach or the air of sadness that wafts around you from day to day.

When you reach that point, and all illusions are cast by the wayside, you can face yourself honestly and really figure out what you stand for and what is really important in your life.

It me, out past midnight, sober, and with a half dead left foot. The holiday party was last Tuesday and I still don’t have full feeling in the middle three toes (not sure if I need to see a doctor about this). I had a different outfit planned, but, being the sometimes reactionary person that I am, after a friend commented that I dress like a man, I bought a new outfit that landed somewhere between feminine and thotty. I figured I could leave my comfort zone for one night.

It’s been coming up in my journal entries and lists over and over and over. Simplify. Pare down. Essentials. Remove. It’s trendy, but there are reasons for trends. Some of mine in relation to everything:

I can’t be bothered

I have yet to wake up during that mysterious, magical time known as “early in the morning”

I don’t have the space to keep a lot of different (or multiples of) things

In my experience, things go better and smoother when there aren’t a lot of things or moving parts to consider. Thinking I need to apply this in several areas of my life. Including this one.