Monthly Archives: April 2012

I am a firm believer that shared experiences in life bond people together. Shucks, just being from Minnesota has brought Courtney and I closer to others here in Seattle who are originally from there. It’s been a great talking point that we can all relate with. Then there are embarrassing topics that probably shouldn’t be shared with others – like a classic schart story…

Arts and crafts can be a tantalizing experience for all ages. It takes a creative mind to come up with fun, new activities for those involved to enjoy. After all, making sock puppets, drawing hand turkeys, and doing water paintings can get old fairly quickly. This is why I have decided to introduce you to the art of making cat hair dolls! So get ready, sit back, relax, and be prepared to take some notes – you are about to receive the how-to guide of a lifetime!

When my brother and I were old enough to stay at home without supervision, our parents set up rules for us to follow:

Karl (my bother) is in charge.

Spend an hour practicing both piano and trumpet.

No Nintendo.

No TV (didn’t really matter – dad was anti-cable TV).

Must clean the house every day (probably why I am a clean freak).

My brother and I had our own set of rules:

Practice piano & trumpet for 15 minutes (combined).

Karl can play Nintendo all day, if Kurtis can play with fire…

Yup, I had recently discovered fire. I would play with my action figures outside, pour gas on them, light them on fire, and giggle like a madman! The only toys that survived my wrath belonged to my brother, which I recently acquired…

There are several different kinds of pranks – some destructive to property, others not so much – the main goal usually shoots for a certain level of shock effect on the people that experience it.

An acquaintance of mine pooped on a paper towel in the high school bathroom, and placed it in the vending machine. The unsuspecting victim accidentally grabbed his turd while blindly searching for the candy bar she just purchased…not cool. Pranks like that are just plain gross.

The one I came up with was harmless. My plan was to release a few rats in the cafeteria during lunch, and watch people scatter…

Before moving to Seattle, I made a promise to Courtney that I would “get sexy” if I could be a stay-at-home cat dad.

My definition of getting sexy: Tone up my arms and chest, and get a six pack.

Now this promise seemed like a reasonable goal at the time, as I was 160 lbs. with little fat to shed from my body. Little did I know, Seattle has an endless amount of great eats – a heaven of sorts for foodies like Courtney and I. This has been disastrous for my waistline and my goal of “getting sexy.”

My former job in Minnesota kept me extremely active, which allowed me to eat whatever and whenever I wanted. SERIOUSLY. At one point, I was training for a cream cheese wanton eating contest. My usual dinner looked something like this:

The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and the kids were doing what they do best…chillin in their respective hangout spots. The opportunity was too good to pass, so I started snapping photos of them…