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Google's Mysterious Floating Data Center

Which
came first, the chicken or the egg? The same can probably be asked of
Google and the government's (NSA, CIA, FBI, DHS, and various other 3-letter
agencies) need for a massive data collection capability that at first
glance has the appearance of a benign private company. Even though Larry
Page (creator of PageRank for website pages; i.e., named after 'Page,'
not 'page') and Sergey Brin undoubtedly developed and built Google without
any help from the Fed, their current intertwinings with every facet
of government from low level agency personnel all the way up to the
prez himself is unquestionable. You don't get that kind of access and
wield such influence without giving up something in return - usually
your honor and personal motto (in this case abandoning "Don't
Be Evil").

We have all witnessed hypocrisy on the part of
Google's executives in the form of a pimped-out
Boeing 767 aircraft for globe trotting under the guise of eco-warrioring,
along with special landing privileges at military installations. Add
to that the massive data centers that consume mind-numbing amounts of
power while assuaging their guilt by installing a few solar panels and
wind turbines in the desert to supply partial power. But wait, now there's
more.

Very
recently, a massive floating barge was spotted docked in San Francisco
Bay that has ostensibly been traced back to Google. Just for the record,
I am not claiming that Google has anything to do with it, but numerous
reports suggest it is so. It is actually one of two such behemoths built
by a contractor, with the other having been photographed in Maine. Speculation
(OK, rumor) has it that Google is implementing such an installation
(or installations) as a means of skirting the law by operating in international
waters. It conveniently might also excuse the company from taxation
in any particular country. Oh, and maybe, just maybe, one or more of
the aforementioned 3-letter agencies might be ushering the process along
out of the goodness of its (their) G-man (and G-woman) heart(s).

Does
all this sound a bit too conspiratorial for you to buy into it? After
all, where will the power come from to operate all the computers that
will be needed to run the data center? There is not enough room for
the amount of solar panels that would be required, and a wind turbine
is out of the question. Underwater turbines that feed off of currents
or tides won't do it either. That leaves just three options that I can
think of, either enormous power cables lying on the ocean bottom that
are fed from onshore sources, an onboard carbon-based fuel electrical
generator, or a nuclear-powered electrical generator like what is used
on a submarine. The first option might prove dicey since sovereignty
issues would be debatable depending on who is supplying the power to
the barge. The second option is flat-out hypocritical (not that it would
harm their consciences at this point) and the last option is the scariest
of all since obtaining such technology would require either special
access to military sources and licensing or collusion with terrorists.

A
lot of investigative reporting has been done on this revelation in the
last week or so since the Google barges' discovery. U.S. patent
7,525,207, "Water-based
data center," (assignee: Google, Inc.) was found that outlines exactly
such a facility, without divulging too much detail about the implementation.
The abstract states thus, "A system includes a floating platform-mounted
computer data center comprising a plurality of computing units, a sea-based
electrical generator in electrical connection with the plurality of
computing units, and one or more sea-water cooling units for providing
cooling to the plurality of computing units." That appears to address
the power source question in general, but does not rule out the possibility
of an onshore connection.

Believe it or not, my suggested possibilities
for unreasonable power sources was made before reading the patent, which
indeed proposes exactly those. If implemented, they will be distractions
to pacify the concerns of Greenies - who will gladly go along with and
defend Google like good little trained drones. Regardless of the power
source, there will be a huge amount of heat generated by the onboard
equipment that will need to be dissipated. Undoubtedly that heat will
be transferred directly into the ambient water. Doing so in sovereign
waters will require a legal permit which will be issued only following
extensive studies of the ecological ramifications of adding such a copious
amount of heat to the water. Nuclear power plant construction has been
successfully blocked specifically due to concerns for how the increase
in water temperature will affect plant and animal life in the area.
Such processes typically take many years. Has Google applied for and
received such permits? Has NSA told the EPA to quell the objections
of the NIH and OSHA because DHS, CIA, and FBI deem the capability to
be top priority? Do you think there is a chance that someone has greased
the skids, so to speak, for obtaining such licenses? Nah, that would
be unethical.