As CNET reader Ismael Del Toro wrote to me late last night of Samsung's ad: "I just hated the ad. So I added things."

I display here his version of "Call Me Ismael, Samsung, you punks." Quaintly, he believes that Samsung is merely a bully.

Still, his version of the ad suggests that, though Samsung's ad boasts that its screen is far bigger, you have to "use 20 inches away for eye comfort."

His bile bubbling in his inner cauldron, he further suggests that the extra talk time of the Galaxy S3 is "practical for telemarketers," just as the 790hrs of standby time is "practical when not in use."

Further, he suggests that the Galaxy S3's extra weight is "because plastic is heavier than glass or aluminum."

Feel the aggression.
Josh Cohen

His, though, is not the only expression of disgust offered by Applepersons. I am grateful to the fine reader whose comments handle is "obviouslynotduckwithnukes" for passing me a version by Josh Cohen.

His work of art simply scrubs out the headline and offers some alternative substantiations.

For example, where Samsung boasts of S-Beam, Josh suggests an Apple alternative: e-mail.

About the author

Chris Matyszczyk is an award-winning creative director who advises major corporations on content creation and marketing. He brings an irreverent, sarcastic, and sometimes ironic voice to the tech world.
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