Happy Spooky Day! (Part 1)

“Spooky Day” is Rory’s name for Halloween, but I’ve missed it (againnn… that seems to becoming a tradition too). And I missed All Souls’ Day. AND Dia de los Muertos. Let’s make it a spooky week then!

The starter flag dropped for the end of year rush last week with Finny’s birthday (SIXTH! Another post…) and since then every day feels like managing triage. Finn has only a month left of prep, the weekends are filling up fast with end-of-year stuff, my sister came to visit, there’s Christmas cards to write, presents to find/wrap/hide: the days just aren’t long enough.

I was really excited about Halloween though, and went to a bit more effort this year – there’s just so many cool ideas to try! The most obvious was to carve my first ever pumpkin, because why the hell not. I screwed up though; I didn’t buy one straightaway and they sold out. But not to worry, because Justine and I came up with the perfect solution; Halloween Watermelon.

MUUUST EEEAT BRAAAAIINNZZZ…

We even found a pumpkin-shaped one! It rolled a bit, but we fixed that by setting it on Finn’s footy kicking tee. I don’t know how easy pumpkins are to clean out this way but watermelon is easy as, plus you can stuff it in your face as you go.

Thanks to expert advice I bought a carving kit instead of just using a knife.

The finest pumpkin carving kit three bucks can buy. Not sure what the poky thing on the right is for. We used it for poking.

It was so easy! I worried the rind was too thin and would curl in the heat so we left a bit of raw bloody flesh in there too. Figured if we were lucky the currawongs would peck his eyes further out.

They look nicely bloodshot, don’t you think? And delicious.

Okay, impostor pumpkin; done.

Next we sorted the kids’ costumes. Finn’d got a nerf gun from a classmate for his birthday after years of nagging us for one. He presumably wanted to swagger around brandishing it at the neighbours (yet remain a good guy) so opted to be a police officer. Rory didn’t want to be a baddie either, so he became Finn’s partner. No dramas making their uniforms as my sewing skills have evolved beyond the stapler of last year; now I use double-sided tape as well.

What You’ll Need:

2 pairs of Finn’s navy school shorts for next year (hand-me-downs)

2 collared navy polo shirts from Big W ($4)

2 plain dark blue baseball caps from Big W ($4)

shoes and socks as the usual sandals aren’t WorkSafe compliant

A printer

The Internets. I copied, pasted and printed Queensland police badges and other insignia from Google images. It’s paper so I don’t think that classifies as criminal impersonation of a police officer; if you’re worried someone might mistake your kid for the real deal, write FAKE in red texta on their face.

cop accessories from the Two Dollar Shop (nb if you’re going to get handcuffs get the metal ones not those pink ones with diamantes). Also closely monitor older child so they don’t try handcuffing their little brother to a street sign).

longish strip of sturdy navy material for equipment belt

and of course your trusty sewing kit:

Take spare staples and stapler for on-the-hop repairs, especially if trick-or-treating in high winds.

Assembly: dress kids in polos, shorts, caps and shoes and staple belts around their waists. Cut out insignia and attach to hopefully compliant child with staples; Scotch tape tricky areas. Attach whistle, cuffs, holster, taser, nightstick and any other cop accessories to belt. Arm children but withhold ammo.

‘Allo, allo, allo, what’s all this then?

Take photos quickly because it’s windy and their badges keep flying off. Halfway around the block curse because your sewing machine has run out of staples.

Ok, first:
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!
Second:
Watermelon is a BRILLIANT stand in for a pumpkin. If we had watermelons available this time of year, I think I’d do that too, just so I could eat the mess. It would make clean-up infinitely easier.
You’ll find gutting a pumpking is a lot more work and a lot more mess but, in a way, it’s also a lot more fun. And it makes your hands soft after you wash off all the dried gore.
Third:
The third spooky tool in the carving kit is, indeed, a poker. It is also a drill. The poking part is so that you can trace your pattern without using a marker, which comes in handy if you are putting a paper pattern over your carving victim and need to copy the lines down under the paper. You just poke them through the paper and voila! Traced pattern. Then, if you need to make perfect, small holes, you poke the poker in and twist it round and round and drill through. Now you know how to use all three tools. They’re awesome, right? We’ve got the fancy one with wooden handles but Gabe wants to get the extra fancy one for next year. I don’t know what makes it extra fancy, though.
Four:
Your sewing skills are coming along nicely. Those costumes look legit!
And, finally, Five:
Seriously? The kids can’t handcuff each other to sign posts? Ugh. Least Fun Mother EVER!

Thanks Halloween Queen! Everything was heaps fun and turned out quite well so I’m encouraged to go even bigger and better next year, plus maybe even get some spooky post/s out in a timely fashion. Thanks for the carving tips – I particularly like the drilling little holes idea for next year!
And being the most fun Aunty ever of COURSE you’d let the kids handcuff each other to stuff, while no doubt also teaching them dirty jokes, limericks, and encouraging them to shave each other’s heads…