Hey wait, a wedding, and we weren't invited? It seems that elfin Indy driver Danica Patrick went and got married over the weekend, right under our noses, and we're just now hearing about it. And the staffers at Star call themselves journalists ...

Details are beginning to leak, though (probably through Robert Novak), including the name of the groom — Paul Hospenthal — his age (40) and his profession (physical therapist). In fact, the two reportedly met while Hospenthal was treating her for a hip injury suffered during a yoga class. We suspect that to be true because it's too stupid to make up.

We had always hoped that Patrick would hook up with someone proportionally opposite, such as Shawn Bradley, or Randy Johnson. We're just kind of weird that way.