Polish Grammar

Polish language has probably the hardest grammar of any known language. There are so many tenses, cases, aspects, forms, number classes, gender classes, moods and voices that you could go crazy just from knowing about their existence. In addition, there’s a different conjugation of verbs for any tense, gender etc. With big probability, even 100% of Poles can use them, nearly none of them could actually say how many of them they have without thinking for a few minutes. To make matters worse, the Polish order of words is totally random.

An interesting fact about Polish grammar is that there are more exceptions than actual standard forms.

Actually, all books about Polish grammar are banned around the world because of mass cases of insanity, eye-gouging and vomits on precious bookstore floors. It’s saying that original language of Cthulhu (from: Cho, ciulu, meaning C’mon, unclefucker) was Polish, and R’yleh originally was written as “ryło” (phiz), but believers had problems with Polish national alphabets, even with the Simplified. There are only two countries that didn’t ban those books: Hungarian goverment allowed to sell Polish grammar books in their country as it’s similar to Hungarian one. Zimbabwean dictator Robert Mugabe has no knowledge about the existence of Poland and therefore he didn’t ban it.

Unfortunately for those mad people that want to live in Poland and get its nationality, they have to go through at least II volumes of basic grammar books. That explains extremely high rate of refusal of applications for Polish nationality.