"Harry, if you ever want to be a great wizard, you need a gimmick. Look at these guys....big googly eye, monk robe and pointy beard. Hell, I'm just a lazy slob, but go years without shaving and walk around all day in my bathrobe and I look like a wizard. Now look at yourself."

"I tell you Harry, I have not changed into a completely different but similar person. And no, I don't want to hear what you found out about a spell cast on some Muggle named Darren Stevens 40 years ago."