Outside vs Inside

Ah...the spa. A place of serenity, calm and oneness with the universe. A place where we can go to escape the hustle and bustle and be treated as human beings. A place where looking after your mind, body and spirit is of the utmost importance. Well...for paying customers, anyway.

It turns out that all that Zen idealism doesn't apply to all living things. There’s a high-end spa I know in a major metropolis that doesn’t treat its employees very well. I was talking to one of the massage therapists who is quitting because she can’t take the abuse any more. Apparently her boss manipulates and berates those tasked with pampering their guests.

She told me she became a masseuse because she wanted to give to people, to look after them. She says she can’t do her job properly when she’s constantly holding in her anger or feeling disrespected or disgusted. So she’s leaving to find another job at a spa that practices what it preaches...a place she can feel proud to work.

So many companies are obsessed with trying to be or act “authentically,” when it seems so many don't to know what “authentic” means. Authenticity means that the way we present ourselves to the outside is a perfectly accurate representation of who we really are. That means, the outside world should be able to guess what it would be like to work there based on their experience. In the case of the spa, how they present themselves is clearly not who they are.

For all those companies that preach customer before profit, I hope they are putting employee before profit, too. If a company wants to stand for innovation, to be seen as challenging their customers to think differently, then they need to be open to new ways of doing things inside their company also. If a company wants to be seen as a leader in their category, then they need to stop obsessing about their competition’s every move or wondering “how will they react if we make this decision.” Leaders lead; they don’t worry about what those behind are thinking. And, most importantly, what’s right for the customer must also be right for the employee.

This is not idealism, it's good business. The more the inside and the outside match, the more those on the inside will invest of their own blood, sweat and tears to see the company succeed. This makes it much easier to match the expectations a customer has with the experience they will actually get. And when that happens, when authenticity really exists, loyalty results.

As for the fancy spa in the fancy part of the city? All their best masseuses, those who are trying to be authentic in all they do, are leaving. Profit is down, equipment is broken and the business is coming apart at the seams. So I guess they are being authentic after all. They are starting to look like exactly who they really are.

Aaaaaaah Simon. In a PERFECT world authenticity would be celebrated. No silicone implants, no botox, no face lifts, toupees, Viagra, no fraud in relationships...it takes confidence, maturity, and humility to celebrate differences. We are all flawed and that makes us who we are – unique.

I have many stories where I was undermined, undervalued, slandered, and manipulated by wannabes and egotist. They say that you are drinking the poison that is supposed to kill your opponent.

I am so agree wih you but for mepersonaly that is more the employ point of view and when it comes to management things as much different. Don't forget that managers are under huge preasure from many sides.

Ah Gerda G, We aren't all that different you know. Everybody is trying to play it very unique, but at the end we are all humans and we all want the same thing - to love, to be loved, to be accepted, ... and so on. It is simple.

I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

Ah Gerda G, We aren't all that different you know. Everybody is trying to play it very unique, but at the end we are all humans and we all want the same thing - to love, to be loved, to be accepted, ... and so on. It is simple.

That seems to be true in the franchise spas. A number of therapists that graduated with me and went to work at a franchise had the same opinion. It seems that the spas are owned by business Men and Women not therapists. It's all about the numbers!!!

Lying disguises our mortality, our inadequacies, our fears and anxieties, our loneliness in the midst of the crowd. We yearn for the comfort of familiar lies to create a more amenable reality. （Howards Mel, USAwriter）

Thank you, thank you!! What a breath of fresh air is to read this. Especially when I read this part:
"...If a company wants to be seen as a leader in their category, then they need to stop obsessing about their competition’s every move..."
It seems to be what we experience from time to time in here.

I am so agree wih you but for mepersonaly that is more the employ point of view and when it comes to management things as much different. Don't forget that managers are under huge preasure from many sides.

As always, Simon, I find your words to be quite profound in their simplicity. Thank you for them.

Of course you are right. Treating employees well is good for business, although as you know, there are examples of many extremely profitable businesses (at least in the short term) that don't. Treating employees well is the right thing to do and one of the ways to ensure, as I argue in Lead By Greatness, that the hours we spend in business are building our human characters, not just our economic value.

The other piece of character growth through business is to be ever mindful that as important as our employees are, their and our first and foremost ethical responsibility is to deliver satisfactory and growing ROI to our investors/owners. The only way we can do this is by efficiently providing a valued product or service to customers whose wellbeing we genuinely care about.

Using your wedding colors or other colors which compliment them or the surrounding backyard landscape, choose flowers to be planted in the 1 foot border of each layer and the top of the tiered floral wedding cake.

I have been involved in various degree’s with wellness/corporate and service industry for decades. Walk into any spa and have some conversations with many masseuse’s and how they are treated – dare I say “used”, and you’ll begin to realize the commonality of the situation.

This double standard work ethic, is rampantly out of control in the service industry in general, even though it is constantly wrapped up in the rhetoric of mission and vission statements that seduce nieve admirers, rarely live up to what they offer.

I was recently reading a job post for the position of live in host for a Five Start, Luxurious, High end bed and breakfast advertising itself as #1 retreat and wellness Chalet in Canada - just the kind of job I might be interested in?

A little furthur down the endless list of responsabilities and duties needed to support “the high end standards”, it became very clear where the priorities and values of the operator were being placed, and it certainly was not on the wellness or health of the potential candidate, who was to become “the ultimate concierge ensuring all aspects of stay are at the highest standards”:

“Full Responsibility of the Guest Experience”
Responsible for the Chalet’s management”
“Manage and Coordinate Wellness Packages with Guests & Yoga Teachers”
“Must demonstrate the skill to implement and maintain a five star customer service culture in a long –term, consistent manner”
“Must have a willingness to work flexible hours”
Chalet Hours are 7am-11pm

…And the rewards [kicker] for “continueing the five star experience, year round”…

- Private Bedroom & Bath + All utilities electric, gas, water, TV and internet, parking are included. In house laundry. Use of full gourmet kitchen for personal meal preparation ($1200/month)
- + base salary (paid $600-$700(depending on experience)/individual every two weeks)
- At least 1 day a week off work full duties (meaning no working at the Chalet - perhaps very light guest request - but only if available)
- At least 2 consecutive full days off a month
- 2 consecutive weeks fully paid salary for vacation in the summer per year
While the original posting suggested a “team”, I cannot imagine where the concept of work/life balance or health and wellness comes into play for those who are expected to create any sort of authentic experience for the guest.

To be frank/honest in as much as I know, value and desire to be a better human being, there have been times in my life where I may not have created the kind of five star experience others might expect or deserve. However, there is nothing worse than working for a boss or a company that has a higher degree of standard and treatment for the guest than the employee. It is this lack of congruence that is our greatest challenge and most important shift to be made within those environments/relationships with which we truly want to live, love, work and play.

Aaaaaaah Simon. In a PERFECT world authenticity would be celebrated. No silicone implants, no botox, no face lifts, toupees, Viagra, no fraud in relationships...it takes confidence, maturity, and humility to celebrate differences. We are all flawed and that makes us who we are – unique.

I have many stories where I was undermined, undervalued, slandered, and manipulated by wannabes and egotist. They say that you are drinking the poison that is supposed to kill your opponent.

I have to say, I really don't think it's easy to judge an entire company, it's leadership or managing skills by speaking to 1 - apparently unhappy - employee.
In the circles of employees, lots of chitchats and gossips go around, especially when these are women. (talking out of experience)
I don't know this company you write about at all or the situation the masseuse was in, just reflecting on this piece you wrote and how it comes across as a reader.
I'm an entrepeneur as well and can feel this piece in a way. I've had a similar situation where 1 or 2 girls were actually manipulating the rest of the staff (and obviously themselves) with their thoughts and assumptions, that were actually not based on reality at all. When she came to the management ans discussed it, it was cleared out that she made a mistake, but the damage was already done. I.e. all the others were already 'infected'.
I don't know if i'm currently in some defense mode :-), but it does feel like a rushed off and harsh conclusion you made at the end.