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Posts from May, 2010

it is just about anybody’s dream to find someone to love him or her. Although it is nice to have your own things to do and to do things your way, there are times when it gets lonely. You would eventually want to spend your life with someone. You would want to share your experiences and accomplishments with someone who wants nothing but your happiness. But finding a partner is never easy. It is never easy to find someone who will love you despite the many flaws you have. It is not easy to find someone who will love you in spite of the many problems you have had in the past.

But never fear. You will be able to find someone. There is always a designated someone for every person. It is just a matter of how you find this person. Because of technology, many people would opt to find a partner through the use of the internet. More and more people are becoming internet savvy, making people more open to finding love online. The many success stories have encouraged people to try finding love this way. So for those who actually want to try this road, how do you actually find a partner online? Here are tips on being able to find someone online whom you can love and hold:

• be active online. Sign up in forums. There are many people you can meet there. You can interact with them and get to know them better.
• put up a blog. There is no better way to interact with people than by getting them to know something about you. A blog is a perfect way to let people know more about you and get more friends. but be careful not to place too much information online. The internet is crawling with people who like to prey on people and stalk them.
• Make friends online. Comment on people’s blog entries and get to know other people.
• Attend events where in people who met online would meet in person. These events are usually themed. There are usually themes for these events, such as Neil Gaiman fans club get together or comic lovers convention. This would allow you to get to meet people who have similar interests to yours. It will make the conversations a little more interesting and less awkward.
• Be open to chatting with people before meeting them. Though you cannot judge as to what a person would be like by merely chatting with them, this would give you a little idea as to what kind of person he or she is.
• Join discussions of things that interest you. This would be good for you as you both would have things in common.
• Join those speed dating events. Many people usually show up in speed dating events. It is usually facilitated by moderators, making it very safe for you.
• Get friends online to introduce you to other people. It is usually safer nowadays as the internet can give you more information about people. Social networking sites are great as well because you can use them to get better ideas about the people you want to get to know better.
• Be friendly. If people do contact you online, be open to get to know them better. it does not have to be something romantic. Just be open to being friends with them. Nothing is wrong with having more friends online. But draw the line when they become too fresh for you or too close for comfort.
• Join communities online. There are many communities that suit many kinds of people. You can join them to get to know more people.
• Frequent social networking sites. You get to meet a lot of people through those kinds of sites. This will also give you an idea of what kind of person you would be dealing with.

It is never hard to find someone to date. But it is hard to find someone whom you can love and who will love you back. So take the time to collect these people and then select which one you feel would best fit you and your personality.

Some guys find it so easy to get parents to like them. Whether it is attributed to luck or charm, these guys never seem to have a problem with parents while he dates their daughter. However, there are some parents who aren’t so nice. In fact, it doesn’t have to be both parents who don’t like you even just one parent can make it hell for you to date their daughter.

In many cases, parents tend to be very picky when guys date their daughters. It’s only natural, they want their daughters to have the best of everything and they would prefer someone perfect to take their daughters out and to woo them. So when you are faced with a mother and father who are definitely not falling for your charms, here are a few tips to help you to get your girlfriend’s parents to like you:

• Do a little of your own research and find out more about your girlfriend’s parents from the things that your girlfriend tells you. Find out what kind of relationship she has with her mother and father and how big an influence they have on her and the decisions she makes. This will give you a better idea of understanding where her parents are coming from.

• Ask your girlfriend to build you up a little with her parents. Have her focus on all your positive aspects and let your girlfriend know that having her parents like you is important to you, especially if you are in it for the long haul with your girlfriend. Make sure she gives them a good impression of you before you meet them in the future.

• Meet your girlfriend’s parents when you know that you really love your girlfriend and when you have the gut feeling that it is the right time. Make sure you meet under comfortable circumstances so that you don’t put yourself through too much agony. You may even want to invite them both to dinner out with you and your girlfriend. Either way, try to impress them on your first meeting and show them that you really care about their daughter.

• Upon meeting them, listen carefully, be observant and find out their reactions to certain things you say or do. Keep a mental note of it and try to fix negative things quickly. Always be alert to things that the parents may enjoy and like so that you can use that information in the future. If the father likes golf, then maybe you could take up golf later. If the mother loves gardening, maybe you could lend a hand in her garden one of these days. All these little bits of information matter when it comes to getting her parents to like you.

• Don’t avoid your girlfriend’s home or her parents as much as you can. You’ll only stress yourself out, and besides, parents know when you are avoiding them. Before picking her up at home, chat with your girlfriend’s parents before taking her out. On weekends, drop by during convenient times and always let them know you are coming over. Don’t overdo it, but let them see that you are not intentionally avoiding them. Otherwise they will resent you for trying to keep them in the dark about your intentions.

• Cut down on the public displays of affection when your girlfriend’s parents are in the vicinity. Reduce contact to just holding her hand at the very least. Be respectful when they are around and focus a little more on them when they come and talk to you. Let your girlfriend know when it is uncomfortable for you to be too affectionate with her parents around. Never hang out in your girlfriend’s room when you visit. Hang out in a common area where you can include her parents in your visit and enjoy each others’ company.

• Be honest and considerate with her parents when you are all together. What they really want to know is that your intentions with their daughter are good. Don’t be afraid to let them know how much you care for their daughter when the topic ever comes up. Have meaningful conversations with her parents so that they know that you are an open and honest guy who can be trusted.

so you have been with your girlfriend for more than two years. You have both been through a lot of adjusting and a lot of compromising. You have gotten to know her family and she has gotten to know your family as well. your family loves her and her family thinks the world of you. In fact your mother has been very vocal about wanting her grandchildren to look like your girlfriend. You have made future plans with her in mind. A lot of her plans also include you in them. You jive so well and work so well together. You love her so much that you cannot imagine being with someone else. So maybe it is time to propose to your girlfriend of nearly three years. So how do you go about with it?

Here are the steps you must follow to proposing to your girlfriend:

• be sure that you are ready for marriage. Marriage is not something you should play with. It is something very important and you should think it through.
• the next thing would be to get the ring. Ask for the help of her mother, sister or best friend. Ask them what type of ring she would like. There are so many styles. Try to get them to find out her ring size.
• You can also casually ask her about her style of jewelry when passing by a jewelry store during one of your visits to the mall
• You can also peep at her taste in jewelry. The types of bracelets and necklaces would be able to tell you if she likes flashy jewelry with intricate designs and huge gemstones. You can also tell if she is into simple jewelry that she can wear every day.
• Use her clothing style and lifestyle to tell you what type of ring to get. If she is a glamorous dresser, she might want a flashier sort of ring. If she is into funky wear, then you might want to get her a vintage looking ring that came from Old grandmother’s cupboard. But if she dresses simply but fashionably, it might be wise to get her something simple. Get her something that would easily match with everything she wears and that would not entail her to take it off.
• Look at her fingers and make sure that you find out her ring size. The last thing you would want is to have the ring fall of her hand.
• After getting the ring, make sure that you keep it well.
• Now it is time to find the perfect place to propose.
• Remember the most important moments in your life. try to recall the most important moment in your life and where you were at that time. See if you want to recapture that moment while proposing to her.
• You can pick a romantic restaurant or a trip to the beach. It is up to you.
• You can also recreate her fantasy proposal. Try to find out what this would be. Every woman has a fantasy of how they want to be proposed to. Get her best friend or her sister to find out what her dream proposal would be.
• Be creative with your ideas. Just make sure that she would not have any inkling as to what will happen.
• It is important that you choose a good place to propose. She will remember this moment for the rest of her life.
• As you take her to the place where you plan to propose, make sure that she would not know anything about the proposal.
• It would be nice if you can document the proposal so she can watch it during the years to come.
• Make sure that there are cameras and video cameras to capture the moment she says yes.

There are many ways on how you can propose to your girlfriend. You can do it on a mountaintop. You can hire someone to write it in the sky. You can also place the ring in her cake while she eats it. But the most important thing would be the actual proposing. The most important part would be you letting her know that you want to spend the rest of your life with her because you love her and would not want her to go to someone else.

There are times that we go out with a guy that we feel could be “the one” and it ends up that he is completely the opposite. For instance, instead of a normal restaurant, he takes you to a fast food place for your first date and expects you to collect and pay for your own meal! Or you’ve gotten all dressed up for a wonderful evening on the town and he shows up in the same shirt he’s been wearing all day and torn jeans and takes you to a bar where he spends the evening checking out other women or talking to his friends who hang out there all week!

When these things happen to you, you wonder why you even said yes to him in the first place. But you’re a nice girl and nice girls are never rude, so you grin and bear it all. In fact, when he wants to switch locations, you agree and he takes you to an even worse place than before. To save yourself from further torture and torment, here are a few things that you should do to end a disastrous date early, with the grace and confidence that you intend:

1. Take him to the side, if you are surrounded by his friends, and tell him gently and firmly that the evening is just not working out for you. Thank him for the nice date and let him know that there is just no chemistry that you are feeling between the two of you. Most men are not good at guessing what we feel even if we’re obviously uncomfortable, so it is important to be clear and firm about what we say.

2. Don’t give him a goodnight kiss. A goodnight kiss is reserved for those dates that go fantastically well and when we feel that the man’s effort during the date deserves this tiny but most meaningful of rewards. If you hated the date you were on and you give him a kiss, even just a peck on the cheek, this will send the wrong signals and he’ll just think that you were uncomfortable only on that one night, and that maybe you can do it again soon. So just thank him and tell him that you can find your own way home so that you don’t have to sit through even more discomfort if he offers to drive you.

3. If you really hated the date and know that you would definitely not go out with him again, make it clear. He may beg you for another chance by setting another date, but say no and be firm. You may consider dating him again, but if you really don’t want to then don’t beat around the bush and send mixed signals. It will turn out more unfair for the both of you and you’ll end up in another night of torment with him again before realizing it.

4. To stay friends or not to stay friends. This all depends. If you both started out as friends and this date didn’t really do anything to damage your friendship to the point of not wanting to be in the same room together, then staying friends would be okay. Maybe that is how you and he were meant to be – just friends. If it was really horrible and he makes a big deal about it all the time and will never let you forget “the time your abandoned him on a date” then maybe it is better the you just keep away and avoid his friendship. Maybe you weren’t intended to have anything to do with each other after all.

Since lots of men are basically clueless about whether their dates are uncomfortable or not, it is important that we, as women, be clear about what our needs and preferences are. If you are not clear, then it marks the beginning of more trouble in the future. Being clear about our needs and being firm about our decisions can help us avoid nasty nights out that turn out in disaster. Instead, be graceful and confident bring the nasty situation to a place where everyone is comfortable and inconvenienced.