I just wrote a post, and the stupid computer ate it. And it's late. RARGH!

Hubby and I had a lot to talk about on our drive Saturday- we were headed back to our hometown for Father's Day. I am going to do what I should have done a long time ago- write a blog- a real one. My friends and loved ones have been hounding me to start writing seriously for years, but evidently, what it took was a hundred or so people commenting on a story on the internet to convince me. I sent a note to a web designer friend on Facebook, and am going to go all out- no more of this freebie stuff. We are talking domain name and dedicated graphics. Yet another wonderful development in my life that can be attributed to the PB!

When we got to my house, my parents weren't there, but these had thoughtfully been left out for us:

Gluten free granola bars. Oh Mom. I love you. Alan took one for the team. He said it was OK.

I may not have to explain each and every time from now on though. I gave Dad the bare-bones version of what was going on, (I posted a story, there are lots of really wonderful comments, I am all verklempt!) and he asked for the name and nature of the website. And evidently, he read the story and some of the comments. And said I had done a great job, and that he was proud of me. I am blown away that Dad has finally checked out MDA, even if it was just to see something that I wrote!

I do worry when people read my accounts of events that involved them. Especially, let's face it- Family. Yikes! But he said that he was going to have Mom read it too, and scolded me for taking so long to get motivated. he also suggested that I start gathering up my writing to beef up my blog and give it some variety. Considering that I have archives everywhere- on Sparkpeople, on my long-abandoned infertility journal, and then travel diaries on Facebook- putting this together will be a little crazy, but fun.

We ended up going out to Chinese food (Dad's choice) and I had to do a lot of wrangling with the waitress to establish what was breaded, which turned out to be everything. I ended up having to sub chicken breast in my ahi salad. Who breads ahi?! It should be ILLEGAL!

Anyway- even though I no longer eat fortune cookies, I still like breaking them open. Today's seemed especially meaningful.

Today has been pretty basic, but interesting. Went to pick up hubby's truck form the dealership, and took my car in. The a/c system needs work, and the door seals along the top of the windows need to be replaced. Considering that it's a '99, and a convertible, it was way overdue!

I have been reading "The Schwarzbein Principle", which was written over a decade ago, by an endocrinologist who helps people "heal" their metabolisms. BS or not, I recognized some of the problems and issues she writes about, and it seems to dovetail into the PB with minimal tweaking.

Per the "SP": The two major culprits of not losing weight when you're making a concerted effort and eating healthily: insulin resistance and burned out adrenals, caused by years of low-fat/calorie yo-yo dieting. The general idea is that in order to get my hormones balanced and get my body to actually start losing weight, I need to- well, basically, keep doing what I am doing and make a concerted effort to quit stressing my body out. Coffee just snuck back in, so fine, goodbye coffee! (again) But I don't drink or smoke, and avoid sugar at least 95% of the time, so I have that going for me.

The hardest part would appear to be eating more balanced meals. I have been eating VLC and high fat for awhile, and saw an initial loss. After the first week, I flat-lined. Dr. Schwarzbein maintains that if your metabolism is damaged, you put undue stress on your body when you take things too low carb (guilty) or when you fast (also, guilty.) I am going to try bumping up my carbs a little with the occasional tubers and starchy veg, and see what happens. (Grains are also permissible on her plan, but obviously, I am not going to go there!) Oooh, and I'll add in small quantities of fruit again. 'Tis the season for beautiful, juicy nectarines, peaches, apricots and plums- the stone fruits are my favorites. I will just keep an eye on whether they trigger cravings for me and take it slow.

The planters on the porch are doing well. I have five ripe blueberries, about 10 blackberries still ripening, a ton of mint and assorted herbs, and lots of nice buds on the citrus trees, which look to be turning into something. I also planted the root ends of the green onions I got in my CSA box two weeks ago, and sure enough, they are growing fast! Several have produced inch-high green spikes already.

OK. I am off to do some Wii Walk It Out! I am shocked at what a good workout it is, actually. It's only been a week, and my legs are seriously firming up. Wooohooo!

Today was a food bonanza. Every two weeks, I get a box of veggies and a box of pastured meats from Tara Firma Farms. I pick up at the local CrossFit Box around the corner (A shoutout to the crew at The Cave- nicer people never drew breath!)

So today was my pickup. It's an interesting experiment, not choosing your meat or veggies, but having them chosen for me. I started off with the "Value" meat share, and am thinking of upgrading to the "Family" one- getting three ribs per shipment isn't enough to cook for hubby and myself, especially because I like to cook in big batches. Let's hear it for leftovers!

So this week, I got the aforementioned "country" ribs, a pound of ground beef, and an arm steak. I already had another arm steak from last shipment hanging in the freezer, so they are both getting defrosted and made into a Primalized version of Beef Bourginonne for tomorrow.

The produce box was awesome this week: two bunches of what looks like red butter lettuce, a bunch of arugula, a bunch of mixed mustard greens, white and mixed heirloom radishes, carrots, sugar snap peas, and okra. I have never cooked okra, and never tried it: Dad always maintained that it "tastes like caterpillars", so it was verboten in our kitchen growing up, and I could never get past that. But I think I am going to gird my ovaries and see what I can make it into!

I also hightailed it over to Trader Joe's and grabbed some fresh fruit and berries, persian cukes, more Kerrygold, and free-range eggs. My fridge is bursting at the seams right now, and I couldn't resist taking a photo:

I definitely have some meal planning and cooking to do! I also found some 3 ingredient Dark Chocolate mints at TJ's- Mint, chocolate, honey. Not bad in a pinch. I tried one, and it tastes like an Andes mint. I think I will stash them in the freezer for emergencies.

It's a beautiful day over here today. I decided to throw on a pair of shorts and go about my business: lots of driving, as well as lifting heavy objects (dropping off kits full of science paraphernalia for work). Over the course of my wanderings, I noticed people staring at my legs. Now- I am not slim, or tan, but I never felt like my legs were anything out of the ordinary. I started feeling really paranoid- Did I have an unsightly stain? Did I have long black renegade leg hairs (With two long-haired black dogs, this is not an uncommon occurrence.) Was there a quarter embedded in one of my calves? Had I turned into a mutant?

I asked hubby when I got home, and he said, "You look the same as always! Stop worrying so much about what other people think!"

Then I made a side trip to Cost Plus, and as I was browsing in the jewelry section (I have a weakness), I caught sight of some lady's awesome, muscular calves in a full length mirror. "Wow!" I thought...and then I realized, they were mine. My calves. I guess Wii Walk It Out is really doing a number on them, because they sure didn't look like that last week! I guess that's what people were looking at. I feel very Towanda.

It was a big trip today: to Palo Alto. Hubby and I are making some big decisions baby-wise, and have decided to take a more scientific approach. Going to another clinic is not what we want to do, but my looming 38th birthday in November, the fact that the natural approach- 2.5 years of careful eating, supplements, and acupuncture haven't made a dent- we have to accept the fact that if there's a time to do something drastic, it's now. Plus, there's the fact that we will most likely move back to the Central Valley in 2013- was a pretty big motivator. There are tons of specialists up here in the Bay Area. In Fresno, not so much.

So- we are gearing up for a round of IVF. Both our families have offered to pitch in, as it is expensive, but we are hoping to manage as much as we can on our own. I've gotten through preliminary talks, and my exam- where they made sure I have all the necessary accoutrements for baby making- was today. I like everyone I have dealt with, which is a huge and welcome change from the last go-round. They seem to think all systems are go, and the next step is the big round of tests. The only thing that makes me nervous is my test for FSH levels. The last time I tested it, was a a bad time- at the beginning of the year, when I got those crazy labs from going off sugar cold turkey and eating VLC. The value they worry about is usually taken on cycle day 3, and my results were taken on cycle day 12, which skews things. Still- Optimal levels? Below 11. Mine was 45. The lab sheet helpfully listed this as "post menopausal." Ruh-roh!

Something like this will cause a clinic to counsel you against (or out and out refuse) IVF. It's an indicator of low quality eggs, or low ovarian reserve. I really don't want to get into this and be told, "You need donor ingredients." Particularly when I know I am not post-menopausal by any stretch of the imagination. So I am hoping and praying for a good result this time around.

So where am I going with this? Of course, I started preparing, and Googling, and came up with this article: How to lower FSH levels and improve fertility (Opinion)
It talks about how women with Type O blood (me) tend to have higher FSH levels, and should be eating a Paleolithic-style diet. How's that for serendipity!? I feel like I was in the right place at the right time, for once.

After reading up, I emailed my acupuncture guy, and explained my reservations. I am going to do preliminary blood work through him, so I know if I need to worry about this. He says my diet and exercise levels are optimal, and he will research herbs I can take, "Just in case."

Just breathe. And avoid sugar. And maybe drink some organic green tea. OK, I can do that.

One trip to The Vitamin Shoppe later, my wallet is a heck of a lot lighter, but I feel prepared. I am taking a bunch of different herbs and supplements: Something called Women's Treasure (from the acupuncturist- 16 pills a day!), then kelp, royal jelly, pre-natal vitamins, NAC, Evening Primrose Oil, Vitex, Ubiquinol...I think that's about everything. I hate, HATE taking pills. And then there's the wheatgrass stuff (gluten free!) that he recommended to have in the morning, and the fermented CLO that shipped today. I have two giant pill organizers crammed full, just to help me keep track of the stuff. Jeez.

Then I stopped on the way home and bought a bunch of organic green tea. I am prepared.

Dinner tonight was some accumulated arm steaks, thrown in the Crockpot with marinara sauce. Sauteed zucchini and a green salad rounded it out, and then I had a plum for dessert. I love coming home when the crockpot is going. It makes the whole house smell amazing! And by "amazing", I mean, "Like delicious meat."

Tomorrow is a kitchen day. A lot of cleaning, a lot of cooking (and then probably a lot more cleaning- sigh.) I got my Amazon order of organic shredded coconut- I am going to try my hand at making coconut milk, since I seem to be using a ton of the stuff!

We're also doing our best to prepare for the move in December. I am packing up seldom used media, which we have a lot of. DVD's, CD's, Wii games. It's going slower than I would like, as I am trying to inventory everything before I pack it away. I had a great app for this on my iPhone called, "What's In That Box?" But it seems there's no counterpart out on the Android market. Also: I have a giant breadmaker and a toaster in my cabinets, just taking up space. They were both wedding gifts, and I hate the thought of getting rid of them....but honestly, when am I going to use them again? Does anyone out there still use the appliances for some kind of Paleo food prep? I am all ears!

Hubby said he liked it- the crust was good and strong, I just miss that "crunch" that a crispier crust gives, but I think that may be a dream I need to let go of. It was delicious. I think I will add more salt and seasonings to the crust next time- and possibly, some parmesan?

I also made a major purchase today: ladygrok.com is now mine! So at least part of this weekend will be spent finagling. I still need to figure out if I really need original artwork, or if I should just mock up something in Photoshop. It will take some experimenting.

I am also going to a wedding reception tomorrow. I am a little concerned, as it's out of town and catered Mexican food, but I know there will be at least two other Paleo peeps there- and they are local, so they may be able to rescue me for a jaunt to a steakhouse. Hey, I can dream!

We are going to see Brave tonight at 10 PM, in order to attempt to avoid lots of scream-y kids. I just looked at the clock, and I had better hustle if I want to get some walking in! I am very encouraged. My weight tends to fluctuate up and down within a 5 lb. range, and for the last week, the range has gone a little lower, and shrunk. So, a 2 lb. range, at the lower end. Hopefully, this is a harbinger of good things to come.