Have you talked to your husband about the risks of VBAC vs. risks of a 3rd c-section and possible complications? Sometimes numbers work well for guys...I hope that you can come to an agreement that you're both happy with. I agree that trying the same thing that you did the last two times probably will result in the same outcome.:/

I had a successful HBAC. Last baby I had another CSection. This time Im planning another homebirth which will be a HBA2C.
Very exciting! My HBAC experience was great, and the care was amazing. I even experienced some normal complications (loosing too much blood, small hemorrhage) and my midwife was fully equipped and handled it great.
(This time Im taking preventative measures to help avoid it before and directly after birth)

Hope you have a wonderful birth and a successful VBA2C! You can do it!

My husband prefers our homebirth to any other birth weve had. Watch The Business of Being Born and More Business of Being Born with him

Kristen - Helpmeet to an amazing DH. Mama to seven blessings (and #8 on the way!)

Have you talked to your husband about the risks of VBAC vs. risks of a 3rd c-section and possible complications? Sometimes numbers work well for guys...I hope that you can come to an agreement that you're both happy with. I agree that trying the same thing that you did the last two times probably will result in the same outcome.:/

Maybe I should have statistics more handy. He is not typically the numbers person in our relationship, but maybe that would be a good non-emotional ice breaker. He is so traumatized from DS2 that he doesn't want to talk about any kind of birth at all. Here is how it went down...

With DS2 he was super supportive. We got to 42weeks and doc offered a gentle induction (lower pitocin) instead of just a RCS. We went ahead with that. I was having what I think were mild, inconsistent contractions when I finally went in, but no cervix change on my own. Still like starting from 0 a 2nd time. The pit initially wasn't seeming to progress anything. Doc was ready to call c/s after a few hours, but agreed to wait longer at my and my hubby's urging. With some ball exercises and nipple stimulation ( sure I looked like a freak swirling my hips and tweaking my nipples, lol, but I was determined) we finally got things moving. Doc came into check an hour later and I was at 4cm. Yay! He accidentally broke my water. Progressed to 7cm and stalled there for what seemed like forever, but was probably only a few hours. Pit was higher than we initially set out to go, but not high like with my first. Got the epidural and almost immediately fetal distress (big d'oh!). Doc came in and gently said it was time to section. Once I consented to the c/s everyone went into a frenzy to get me to the OR. Kinda scary. They threw the scrubs at hubby and said to put then in then come in.

Once in the OR they said baby was fine, heartrate back to normal. I knew this. But when hubby walked into the OR someone screamed "what is the dad doing in here? Get him out!" I am laying there, knowing the baby is fine now, but hubby is out in the hallway thinking the worst. And blaming himself for asking for more time to labor. they did finally send someone to get them after staring the surgery.

I didn't know until over a year later that things were handled so badly on his side. But it was truly traumatizing for him, and causes him to be a little closed off on this birthing stuff. He wasn't sure he even wanted to have another kid because of it. That is why, ultimately, I'll respect his wishes if we can't get on the same page. So on one hand I'm dreaming of the way I believe it can be, and on the other I am preparing myself to lay this down so I can not be resentful. later.

Wow, that sounds rough for your husband! I can understand why he would be unwilling to risk feeling that way again, probably very helpless. Why would they not WANT the dad in there? I think it's pretty common that he is there, even if there is an emergency, correct? That sounds awful for him.
Have you tried to explain to him that the fetal distress was likely related to other things that were going on, like the pitocin/epidural? I recently went to a good birth circle geared towards VBACs, and was given a sheet of nifty stats to keep in mind or share with anyone interested. (also, many of the moms who were there who had successful VBACs had very similar stories to yours.) If you want me to scan them to you or just write them down and send them via email, I can do that. I'm sure you could find them somewhere else, but they're all so handily compiled in this handout There are the risks of uterine rupture or other complications along with risks of infection and risk to future pregnancies with placenta accreta, previa, etc.

Wow, that sounds rough for your husband! I can understand why he would be unwilling to risk feeling that way again, probably very helpless. Why would they not WANT the dad in there? I think it's pretty common that he is there, even if there is an emergency, correct? That sounds awful for him.
Have you tried to explain to him that the fetal distress was likely related to other things that were going on, like the pitocin/epidural? I recently went to a good birth circle geared towards VBACs, and was given a sheet of nifty stats to keep in mind or share with anyone interested. (also, many of the moms who were there who had successful VBACs had very similar stories to yours.) If you want me to scan them to you or just write them down and send them via email, I can do that. I'm sure you could find them somewhere else, but they're all so handily compiled in this handout There are the risks of uterine rupture or other complications along with risks of infection and risk to future pregnancies with placenta accreta, previa, etc.

I would love that hand out! I'll pm you my email. I think they kicked him out because the room wasn't completely set up yet?? Really not sure, since they pretty much immediately told me baby's heartrate was back in range. A little while later it was "where's dad?" Lol.

I do believe it was the epi, or possibly a rapid increase in pit after the epi was in place. It was almost immediately after the epi that the doc came in for the c/s.

I know this is a bit of an old post but thought Iwould share my experience. I had a HBA2C in 2011. It was an amazing experience that I would choose over and over. I had an awesome midwife who was supportive and knowledgeable. I am actually 39 weeks pregnant now and have to have a hospital birth....planning another vbac. This scenario has been much more difficult from the beginning because of some health problems that I have had and dealing with the docs/hosp. I am hopeful that it will go as well as possible but having experienced boh scenarios I would never choose a hospital over home....ever. Good luck mama!