Well once again, that flippin human is next door with the neighbor’s Kat.

I stole her iPhone today while she was distracted with the Creature, so I could text my 525th boyfriend, “Crusher”- and I saw all these pictures of Tori on “her” phone! 😾

*Why that dirty, rotten scoundrel!*

I knew she was going in and out of the house several times a day, but I didn’t really believe her when she said she was “checking the mail” fur the 15th time today –

And just LOOK at all these flippin pictures!!!

But then, right when I was starting to get upset at the human, I saw this text she sent one of her grown creatures this morning –

Threatening MY HUMAN?? AWWWW HECK NO!!

THAT’S MY JOB.

I’m going to go over and have a yowling session under the neighbor’s bedroom window and let her know exactly what I think of her threatening my human!
(Like, what time do we want to do this, your claws, or mine)?

Shrimp here with more pictures from my family album. Before we get started, I just want you to know I have no idea where these morons came from. And I’m the cutest and smartest of the bunch.

Fur example:

My great, great, great Aunt Clara tried to get rid of her wrinkles with a face-lift. The only thing that got lifted was her wrinkles – (and her nip stash).

Poor great, great Grandpaw Chubs had his tail bit off by the family idiot (Rover)…

Chubs lived a long, happy life (tail-less) – Rover had an encounter with him in the backyard about a month later and he was never seen again.

Grandma Snowball lost it toward the end – she pawed at bugs that weren’t there, had staring contests with her shadow, slept with the Creatures- and worst of all – MADE FURIENDS WITH THE DOG! 🙀

My third cousin, Bubs ran off every dog in the neighborhood. UnFURtunately, one of those dogs was a K-9 police OFFICER. He got arrested fur assault with a deadly claw.

My Great Uncle Vaugn (who came over on a ship from Germany where he was Chief Mouser), got tired of hunting mice, and decided to get something a little more interesting to catch. UnFURtunately, she only spoke dog.

And last, (But not least)- Uncle Tom sneaked out one day to go serenade his girlfriend, and came back (4 months later) with 16 kittens!

There’s been a lot of weirdness going on around here…..
Here I am surveying my kingdom this morning – watching fur those annoying strays that come around trying to win the hearts of my humans – I DON’T THINK SO! *tail FLAP!* 😾

And in other news…

The Creatures around here somehow got the notion that they have to get even BIGGER (and louder). Fur example…

There’s this snapchat that the Creature and it’s partner in crime sent the human:

It woke me up from a nice peaceful nap to the harrowing sound of THE CREATURE!!

And then…. Right when I’d decided it was safe to resume my nap…

The silence was broken again – by yet another Creature’s voice booming from the humans phone! 😾

This time it was the littlest Creature – trying to say his blessing! (It’s talking now)!

Great. Now I have to book a flight to the Arctic – but I’m gonna sleep on it first. 💤