Next: Rachel Bilson

Amanda Bynes announced her retirement on Twitter this weekend, saving money from using a publicist. "Being an actress isn't as fun as it may seem. If I don't love something anymore, I stop doing it. I don't love acting anymore, so I've stopped doing it. I know 24 is a young age to retire but you heard it here first I've #retired.”

Being an actress is a lot less fun when the actress isn’t working. Really, really admire this decision, no sarcasm attached. Because Why Is Amanda Bynes? It wasn’t going to happen for Amanda Bynes and at 24 years old, recognising this has saved her a lot of time, a lot of energy she can put elsewhere, and a lot of self esteem. Rejection after rejection is hard on anyone. And these actors, they are so frail to begin with.

If only they were all so self aware. Like...

If you compare resumés, Rachel Bilson’s isn’t much more extensive than Amanda Bynes’s. Rachel Bilson has also barely worked over a long stretch. But they keep telling us that Rachel Bilson is some kind of fashion girl. So she gets to stick around, hovering the outskirts, auditioning, leveraging, meeting, negotiating...to no avail.

So about that broken engagement? Marriage is taking a backseat to movie star ambitions, as if Knightley, Johansson, Portman, Hathaway, Williams, Page, Mulligan, Blunt, as if all of them will take the same doomed plane one day.