Costa Rica

Friday, May 23, 2014

Social Outings: Part 1 of – Let’s Say – 1 Billion

Holy
frijoles, Batman! I had no idea so many
people would take a gander at my last entry.
Thanks for the views and I hope it was entertaining.

There are a
lot of things I wanted to get to but I think those will wait for a few
days. Another restaurant review and my
first book review are coming up. Yeah,
you heard me – more food pictures to drool over.

No, what I
wanted to mention in this entry is probably the one and only thing that has
been a slight annoyance since going vegan.
No, not the lack of meat or dairy (like so many of my omnivore friends
have asked), but the persona non grata vibe I sometimes feel when it comes to
social outings with friends. I call it
(as of right now) the Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Syndrome, because like
Rudolph I’m never invited to play in reindeer – I mean – human games. (Quick thought: perhaps Rudolph wasn’t
invited not because of his nose, but because he was vegan?)

"My veganism will allow me to be the most qualified reindeer for this job!"

Perhaps it’s the workings of my
already paranoid mind, but whenever there are outings to restaurants or fast
food joints I seem to be forgotten about.
I know my friends don’t mean to do that on purpose, either. It’s totally subconscious but I think I know
why it happens.

First, let
me reiterate the fact that I don’t think I’m being forgotten about on
purpose. My friends are awesome people
and I’m not walking home as if I’m Charlie Brown. Okay? Got it? Friends = good. That should save me from any hassle from my friends. Moving on.

"Veganism didn't cure my early onset balding. SIGH!"

That being
said, I shall give you one example that happened just recently.

I was at
work and a few of my coworkers were trying to gather a group to go to some
place to eat after they all got out for the night. That place changed from Denny’s to some burger joint (I’ve
forgotten which one). Either way:
ew. Despite there only being about 4-5
of us in the area when the plans were being drafted, nobody seemed to address
me specifically. I wasn’t annoyed; on
the contrary, I was quite amused because I knew I could get a lot of material
out of this for the rest of the shift.

After a few minutes I piped in and
said something along the lines of, “No, I’m all right, guys. I don’t need want to go but thanks.”

There were a few sarcastic replies
but one coworker said something like, “Matthew, you wanna come? You know you’re invited.”

From there, several sarcastic
comments were bandied about but I assured them that I was fine and couldn’t go
anyway. I really couldn’t due to
obligations I already had. That didn’t
stop me from being sarcastic the rest of the night by saying the various, “It
seems everyone’s going but me… since I wasn’t invited.” While I didn’t care too much about not going
out to eat, I guess the more I thought about it, the more a small part of me
was a bit irked that I really hadn’t even been addressed when plans were
made. I didn’t even care if they were
going to some burger joint. That wasn’t
the point.

The point was, I like to socialize,
too! That’s what I think
omnivores sometimes forget and why I was ignored from the initial
conversation. So many of our
interactions outside of work take place around food that they forget that what
they’re really doing is bonding. Food
just happens to be a part of that whole social exchange. What’s more, vegans like to socialize and
have friends just like everyone else.
Shocking, I know! I didn’t want
to go because I wanted to eat a burger.
I wanted to go because I wanted to talk and engage in fun
conversation. As someone who tends to
lean toward introversion, I tend to cherish the few times I am invited
somewhere.

That’s why I don’t think omnivores
do things like that on purpose – at least, not to me. I think once you take out the food equation,
omnivores think, “Well, they clearly wouldn’t want to be in a place that is
serving the foods we like,” and then they go about scrubbing our names from the
list of ‘People To Invite Out’. It may
be true that I don’t like the food but it’s not like I haven’t been to family functions
or work events that have served animals.
I just ignore it, content myself with the fact that I’m doing good by
the animals and to myself, and carry on unless somebody asks me about
veganism. Generally, my veganism never
ever comes up.

Not only that but most places they
like serves at least one dish that I can enjoy. Even a garden salad is something for me to eat. Everyone worries I’m going to be wanting
whenever I go somewhere. Then they open
the menu and find several items that are already vegan or vegetarian that can
easily be turned vegan. It amuses
me. Besides, in the unlikely event that
no food is available it will not kill me to wait a half-hour to go home and
find something to eat.

No, omnivores just forget that we
like to talk. Plain and simple. Doesn’t mean I can’t give them a good
ribbing for forgetting me from time to time.

I suppose we just need to work on
tearing down those mental blockers people tend to have. Maybe t-shirts need to be made?

“I’m Vegan But I Still Want To Be
Friends!” For some (obvious) reason I’m
picturing a cow and a pig hugging. Get
on this, creative people!

Does anyone else have experience
with this phenomenon or had different thoughts about why it happens? Like I said, I am not sitting in the dark
listening to Morrissey (a vegetarian, by the way!) while I lament about not
having friends. I HAVE friends and they
are great. I like observing people and
their behaviors is all and since going vegan, I’ve been getting good at it.

HOW IS THIS PICTURE EVEN REAL?!

QUICK DISCLAIMER: I am sitting in the dark but I’m not
listening to Morrissey. It’s
Coldplay. But it’s not because I’m
depressed and alone! I swear. Ha

Until next time, keep calm and vegan on!

P.S. - The picture of Morrissey comes from THIS site. The picture of Charlie Brown was grabbed from HERE. The image of Rudolph was just a stock picture from Google.