Thank You

“Love isn’t something you find. Love is something that finds you.” Loretta Young

Thank you for all the love and support

Goodness, what a response. I really didn’t expect to blog again for a little while, but before I leave tonight I have to send a note to thank you all for the overwhelming support I got in my last post regarding my mom’s passing. I got an astonishing number of comments and I am deeply moved by the many people that shared their own experiences, the friends & readers who’ve reached out to me and the amazing words of love and support. I haven’t replied to all the comments as I usually do, but know that I’ve read (and re-read) every single one and I will carry all that love with me as I fly home.

I’ve been talking to my father and siblings daily, bringing up memories, sorting through crazy emotions and crying at random times. It’s completely exhausting, but I know that’s a normal part of the grieving process. It will likely hit me even harder when I actually get home, but I know that’s normal too. It is humbling to know so many people are thinking of me at this time and I hope to be able to share back once I get my head together again.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. Love and peace to everyone.

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My heart reaches out to you. It is a dark, sometimes gut splitting primeval groundswell of pain that can overtake you without warning. My father drowned last year in Montana on a fishing trip in July. And while it’s true he died doing something he truly loved, I think of the conversations that will never be had- and the hugs that will never be felt. Travel safely my friend and know that you are not alone with your pain.

I am so sorry for your loss. What helped me through the loss of my mom and dad was to talk about the things they said and did that made me laugh. The tears followed, but the love and the laughter was comforting. Remember that love knows no boundaries of time, space or dimension. Love lasts forever!

Nina –
My wife, Liz, and I have been reading your blog for many months, and we enjoy your excellent photographs and amazing spirit, along with your stories. We just this morning read your post about your mother’s passing, and we join your other readers in expressing my deepest condolences. Losing a parent is a sobering and difficult chapter in one’s life, and no words can gloss over the sadness. Just know that we have felt what you feel. The people you love never truly leave. They will always travel with you.
We look forward to eventually meeting you on the road.
Best,
Steve, Liz and Henry the Husky

I did not comment earlier. Words are never enough. But just know that moms are special, above and beyond all other relatives and friends, including your father. And it does not matter what the relationship may or may not have been with your mother. There is and always be a bond. You are from her, and that is the difference. The grieving will always be there. It will lessen, but will never be gone. And that will be okay. You and she were literally and figuratively connected. That cannot be undone.

We will pray for your safe journey and return and wish you and your family only the best.

Nina: This one is for you…it is “Ascension” by Colleen Corah Hitchcock.

And if I go,
while you are still here…
Know that I live on,
vibrating to a different measure
– behind a thin veil you cannot see through.
You will not see me,
so you must have faith.
I wait for the time when we can soar together again,
-both aware of each other.
Until then, live your life to its fullest.
And when you need me,
Just whisper my name in your heart,
…I will be there.

Nina… I had my 6 year old granddaughter overnighting for the first time alone (minus sibs) when I read your post about your Mom passing away. My note to you is slow but my thoughts have been with you. I lost my Mom in the same way. She was older and had been through some health things but it was sudden. My Dad was the other way when I was younger and just a new mother. He lingered away from us did my inlaws. There is no way to let them go easily. It is the past that will carry you through – both with tears and laughter. Treasure your time with your family and surround yourselves with the things your Mom loved and she will be there in the center of you all.

Nina: Saw you were swamped with replies, so will add in now. Lost both my parents at 12 and 13. Glad you have warm family and friends to help now. Remember you have friends on a creek here in Mt. Shasta. Best to Paul and the pets!!

Nina, your share at such a personal time in your life was kind, personal, human and a wonderful example of what community can bring to all our lives. We will all be ready when you are to pick up where you left off. Dive deep into caring for yourself and your family. You already cared for all of us who appreciate your writing.
With sincere condolences,
Suzanne

I’m so glad you understand the grieving process. It means you’re solid and will be generous with yourself in all things, as you need to be. You will come out of this in your own time, kinder and stronger. You are a part of so many who have also shared your sadness.

I lost my mother at age 14 and don’t think I fully dealt with all the emotions until years later. Give yourself the time you need to grieve. Your community of friends are here to gently embrace you as you move through this difficult time. Sending lots of love your way.

My husband and I enjoy receiving new posts, actually look forward to them. You write beautifully and your pictures are incredible. Hope to meet you in our travels when we begin RVing in less than two years, God willing. Your sweetness and genuineness show in your writing.

Our thoughts are also with you during this sad time. There is no replacing our Mom or Dad, even though in-laws are second to none. When I lost my dad in 1995 it wasn’t a shock since he had been sick for a while with emphysema but as the days went on and on I realized that he didn’t leave us, he just needed to go where there was no more pain and discomfort. Your Mom will always be with you and you know that already. Soon if not now, you will be able to laugh at things she said and did throughout your lifetime. Take the time you need to grieve and soon you will be right back into the swing of it all! Safe travels!

I lost my mother 7 weeks ago. There’s no way to work around the grieving process, though we all wish there were! When my family got together prior to her memorial services, her pastor (a wonderful guy) was there with about 20 family members. He asked us to tell stories of her that we all had memories of, so he could use some of them at her service. We got to telling stories and had such a great time. I do not remember when I laughed so hard. She would have laughed the hardest if she had been there (and maybe she was). I looked forward to the way he would relay these stories during her memorial service. Most of them were there (except for a few x-rated stories) and it turned into a truly wonderful celebration of her life.

I hope that you and your family will be as fortunate as we were in turning such a painful occasion into a celebration..!

Both my parents died in their 60’s, in hospital beds after long and painful illnesses. Knowing they were going to die didn’t make it easy when they passed. An unexpected death hits a little harder, I think.
DIFFERENT LOSSES ARE GRIEVED DIFFERENTLY. I was with my father when he died. I didn’t cry then. It bothered me that I didn’t cry. A while later, I got some good news in my life and my first instinct was to call dad and tell him. A moment later, when I realized I couldn’t share this with him, I broke down and cried like I had never cried before.
When my son died, I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep and I cried continuously for days (weeks? months?).
WE ALL GRIEVE DIFFERENTLY. When my son died, I just wanted to drive out into the desert in my RV by myself and do my grieving alone. My ex-husband (my son’s father – we’re still friends) didn’t want to be alone at all. I stayed with him a while and he understood my need to go when I left.
What I felt most helpful to me was to write a tribute, of sorts, for my son.http://nancysroadtrip.blogspot.com/2013/02/25-years.html
Others who were close to him, handled it differently.
THERE ARE NO RULES FOR GRIEVING. Do as you feel is best and comes naturally. For however long it takes.
My two cents. Hope it helps.
I’m truly sorry for your loss.

Nina, so sorry for your loss. I hope your time in France is restorative and peaceful.
I am sure Paul must be missing your cheerful self and awaiting your return!

My husband and I started following your blog around February when we got the crazy idea of buying an R V and “living the dream” . It was a Sunday, we were watching “Sunday Morning” and the show was featuring a sports figure who lived full time in an RV….we looked at each other and that was it! We had been planning on selling the 2400 sqft house and downsizing to a condo, and he said then what? The dream took flight and we have been researching and planning since! The house is on the market and I have been selling everything on Craigslist!
Suddenly I have no need for fine china, Lennox, jewelry, excess clothing etc…
We can hardly wait to buy our rig, though it won’t be a “beast” like yours, 35 tops I think with a toad….anyhow I wanted to reach out and let you know your blog is such an inspiration and has pushed us forward to make the move! Your posts of your whereabouts are fantastic and we want to go everywhere you have been! I hope to start my own blog soon if I can figure that whole thing out! We will have four paws with us on our journey, our 10 pound Shih-Tzu, Mai-Ling!
I truly hope that in the future we will meet up somewhere and share our experiences! Thanks again for a great and purposeful blog!

Nina,
I’m truly sorry for your loss and send my sympathies.
I am greatly inspired every single day by your beautiful blog .
Although these circumstances make life hard at this present moment,
I hope you can regain your strength soon…
Safe travels.

Nina, my husband and I have been following your posts for several years. I was in tears the other night as I read about your mom passing. It is never easy losing a parent and I have lost both of my parents – my mom died 30 years ago and my dad 20 years ago. There is a special bond between a mother and daughter that is so special. My heart goes out to you this weekend as you are traveling back to be with your family. I will be praying for you and your family at this difficult time. Revel in the memories of the good times together and spend time sharing stories. There is healing in those activities. God’s speed to you. Julie

Nina,
I have been following your posts for awhile now and I have never posted a comment until today. I wanted to say I’m so sorry for the loss of your Mother! This is one of the hardest things to ever go through even when we know someday we have to. May all your wonderful memories of your Mother help bring you comfort during this time!

I lost my loving Mother 4 years ago and it still feels like yesterday. Nothing harder in the world but all the great memories we had together have sustained me. I hope your memories of your Mother does the same for you.

Thank you for your blog! You have helped me laugh, learn, and be inspired with your photos and now cry! So Sorry for your loss Nina! Take care!

The love in your heart wasn’t put there to stay,
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
You were blessed to have your mother with you in flesh and now she will remain in your heart and soul.
God’s blessings to you and your family.
Denise

I’m so sorry you have lost your precious mom. I lost my mom 4 years ago and still to this day I talked to her as if she is beside me! I feel as if she is experiencing life with me at all times! I pray for your safe travels. Remember all the fun times with your family, hug each other, cry together and laugh together remembering what a wonderful mom she was!

I’m so very sorry for your loss, Nina. I lost my father unexpectedly as well, nearly ten years ago now. It was the most difficult period of my life, and the grief was exhausting, overwhelming, and prolonged. As I remember reading in one of the grief books I read at the time, “You never get over it; you just learn to live with it.” True words. One of the few silver linings in my father’s death was that it pulled the rest of our family closer, as we all shared in the loss together. I wish you peace and love as you journey through this challenging life transition.

I’m so sorry for your loss, Nina. My own Mom died when I was 9, and after many funerals for Mom’s of friends (of all ages), I can say this: there is no good time to lose your mother. Peace to you and your family, today and always.

So sorry for your loss. We hope that you find comfort from the love that had surrounded you
From all of of your blog followers.
Bruce and I are in Astoria and we drove up to
North Head Lighthouse today, hoping to meet you and Paul. Sorry that we missed you both !
Maybe our paths will cross someday .
All the best,
Mary & Bruce

There is a small park on the end of a peninsula across the Columbia from Cape Disappointment. The park is just north of Fort Stevens near the River Pilot station and Hammond Marina. We were there for the 4th of July last year. In the park there is a Memorial bench made out of cement. The bench has a poem on it which reads:
If tears could build a stairway
And memories a lane
I’d climb right up to heaven
To bring you home again.

I sat on that bench last year, and watched the river and the fireworks as I cried. I really miss my parents. Virtual hugs heading your way!

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