Defining ourselves through loving relationships

By Jamuna Rangachari

We learn many things nowadays but often end up neglecting the most important aspect of our lives, which are relationships. Let us learn to make them more nourishing to us and the other.

We are born to lead a life with meaningful relationships so we should need to learn to nurture them at all stages of our lives. In a sense, we owe this to ourselves.

Positive Vibes

Once Lord Krishna sent Duryodhan to a nearby village for a day. When he came back, he asked him what he felt about the people there. Duryodhan said he despised them as they were so argumentative and uncouth. Krishna just smiled and asked Yudhistra to go to the same village. When he came back, he asked him the same question, to which Yudhistra said he found them very amicable and hospitable. Krishna then told everyone around him how we all need to note the difference between both of them. “Duryodhan found the people argumentative as he himself is argumentative while Yudhistra found them amicable as he himself is amicable,” he said and continued. “The world is indeed the same. It is our perception that shapes it. After all, we see the world as we ourselves are.”

This may sound simplistic but the fact is, our perceptions do indeed matter.

We need to know that everyone changes when our perception changes. Even in love, we need to work on becoming loving ourselves so that the people around us perceive us positively. We know of many people we avoid just because they keep complaining and some we seek to be with because of their positive vibes.

This is more applicable to couples. We often see couples in the most difficult circumstances holding hands and moving forward together treating it a temporary phase that brings them closer while there are some who seem to have no issues but keep whining and complaining.

Who am I

“Who am I” is question that we grapple with during our entire lifetime. The fact is, it is our relationships that always define us. These are what makes us actually grow and become better individuals or conversely, makes us bitter and negative.

In fact, ninety per cent of our lives are often spent in trying to figure out who was right or wrong. The fact is, in any issue, usually there is never a hundred percent right or wrong answer. All that we can do is NOT add any negative factor and forgive all the issues we perceive to be wrong. When our perceptions change, relationships change and the world itself becomes a better place to be in.

This is equally applicable to all relationships, some more than the other all because of a power equation and a battle of egos.

Nurturing Relationships
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