redefining "family" and the good life.

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Monthly Archives: February 2013

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It’s 1:29am. Im still awake. Happy to report that the official copies of our birth and marriage certificates have been ordered. This is a BIG deal and a weight off my shoulders tonight. Let’s just hope I got the right ones (you wouldn’t believe how much research it took to figure out which are the “right ones”)! Once we have them in our possession, we will need to submit them to the Secretary of State to be apostilled. This has also taken much research to figure out what an apostille is, and how to go about getting one. As soon as I can verify that I have done this correctly, I will post the links to the services I used. Hopefully someone will find it helpful and will have to do less research (and maybe not stay up so dang late). Oh well, worth it! (Did you catch that kids? Staying up a little late to get you home as quick as possible… totally worth it)

I’m finding the need to carve out lots of space to think about and work on things relating to adoption these days. I found this corner in a city coffee shop while on a recent trip to Pasadena for work.

(To a friend) “Will you take a picture of us signing these documents?”

(To the Fedex woman) “Do you mind if we take a picture of you with the envelope before you take it away?”

Each of my kids have a whole book chronicling my pregnancy with them. It’s a story that tells of how excited we were about them and how loved and anticipated they were from day 1. I want my next two kids to have the same thing. Though I don’t have a pregnancy to chronicle, I do have a season of expectancy. I want these kids to know that, just like their brother and sister, they also have an army of people who love them and who can’t wait to meet them, hold them, and live life with them. I want them to know that they have a mom and a dad who are waiting for them and who are anticipating their arrival (kids: we are coming for you!!!!). These kids are loved already and have a family that is making preparations for their arrival.

So these days I find myself taking pictures of unusual things (and asking friends to do the same)- like the fedex woman who picked up the official contract and the text message from a friend who heard the good news. All these things will be saved and compiled in a book and will become part of our family story.

Thank you for participating in this journey, for the role you already play in our kids’ lives, and for your patience in helping us capture and preserve the memories of this crazy adventure.

I don’t watch Parenthood, but not too long ago I was told I should. So, when Dave and I were sitting down in front of the tv (a rare occurrence) looking for something fun and lighthearted to watch and we came across this show, I remembered the recommendation from a friend and suggested we watch it. For some reason I had it in my head that this was going to be a funny show, so I had high hopes of a good laugh and a mindless viewing experience. Turns out my expectations could not have been more wrong. I was crying by the first commercial break- disturbed and yet comforted by this very real look at the “messiness” of family life. The episode wrapped up with this scene, and I have not been able to get it out of my head ever since. To me, this is a beautiful picture of “family” and also a beautiful picture of the Gospel. It came up again today at a conference I’m at for work, so I thought I’d share it here. This has implications for both my personal and my professional life right now- adoption seems to be a theme that is being woven through every facet of my life these days. I am both nourished and challenged by it all. This is crazy stuff. Enjoy!

(Note: I do not mean this is a good picture of the Gospel because these parents are doing such a good thing by “rescuing” this boy who has no family. That is cool, but it is not the point. It is a picture of the Gospel because we, too, are that boy who has been brought into a beautiful and quirky family. We are loved completely and given an identity and full rights as children that we do not otherwise deserve. Something deep within me comes alive when thinking about this. Yes. This is the type of love and family I want to define my life and my work. More on this in a later post…)

A few months ago, I was reading a book with Macy in her room. She put the book down, looked at me, and said “mom, I want a sister. But I don’t want you to have a baby in your belly, I want you to adopt.” I figured there was no way she knew what it meant to adopt, but she was adamant. When I asked her to explain she said, “ it’s when we find someone that doesn’t have a mom and dad and we bring them to our house and you become their mom, and dad becomes their dad, and we tell them that God loves them.”

Many people have asked how Macy and Owen are reacting to the news of their coming siblings. They are beyond excited. In fact, one of the reasons we have had to “go public” with the news so early is that Macy is so excited that she is talking about it with everyone she sees. She usually leads with something like “we have a secret. It’s a surprise and it’s coming in about a year. It’s coming from Uganda!” more recently she’s just started telling people that she has a sister with brown skin in Uganda. We are trying to prep her for the reality that she may not get a sister (in her words, we will get “whatever God brings us”), but the bottom line is that she is excited about having 2 more kids in our home. Owen is equally thrilled, hoping for a brother to play football with (his current life-stage revolves around wanting to “play” some sort of sport 24/7. His dad is enjoying this very much. Shoot, I am too).

Although my kids probably have no idea what is coming their way, I am so glad that they are excited about the idea of sharing the love and the fun of our home with 2 others. It seems that they know we have a good thing going on, and they are ready to invite others into that. As a mom, I think that’s pretty cool.