Sounds like my dad. He's a very handy guy, and there's a lot he CAN do, but if he finds himself flummoxed by a home repair job, he's convinced that no-one on this earth could fix it.

Wow, are we related? Because you just described my parents AND my ILs. The difference is that my ILs do the repairs and have a wonky house. My parents don't do the repairs and just keep adding the potential projects to their list and have a broken house. No kidding I once visited for Christmas and discovered that they had a toilet that had been stopped up for six months. Because they are empty-nesters and it used to be the "kids'" bathroom, they just kept the door closed. A plumber was "too expensive" and they were "too busy" to get it done. (They protested and complained when my sister called a plumber for them for Christmas.)

My husband and I resembled that for our first year of home ownership. Then we spent money on a handyman cleaning up our goofs that would have cost half as much (and 1/10 the time) for him to do in the first place. We've been cured ever since.

Last year we had a serious repair in our bathroom. His parents kept freaking out that we were paying someone to fix it. But they have a toilet that wobbles after they replaced the wax seal. Seriously, there is a whole generation of grandkids who are all terrified of using the potty there.

Exactly how it is for me!

My parents use a hotplate or electric skillet, because their range hasn't worked properly in 15+ years.

This thread has inspired me to track down a handyman on Craigslist and get some stuff fixed around the house - mostly stuff DH and I poked at, couldn't figure out what to do next, and never got back to. I'm sick of my back door not working properly, for instance

ETA: Woohoo, SO glad I did this! Found an engineering student who came out and fixed the front and back door (back door screen was stuck closed and we haven't been able to use it in months), fixed a light fixture in the guest bathroom in which the dead lightbulb was stuck in the fixture, and figured out what was wrong with the fluorescent light in the kitchen. Best $35 ever.

Sounds like my dad. He's a very handy guy, and there's a lot he CAN do, but if he finds himself flummoxed by a home repair job, he's convinced that no-one on this earth could fix it.

Wow, are we related? Because you just described my parents AND my ILs. The difference is that my ILs do the repairs and have a wonky house. My parents don't do the repairs and just keep adding the potential projects to their list and have a broken house. No kidding I once visited for Christmas and discovered that they had a toilet that had been stopped up for six months. Because they are empty-nesters and it used to be the "kids'" bathroom, they just kept the door closed. A plumber was "too expensive" and they were "too busy" to get it done. (They protested and complained when my sister called a plumber for them for Christmas.)

My husband and I resembled that for our first year of home ownership. Then we spent money on a handyman cleaning up our goofs that would have cost half as much (and 1/10 the time) for him to do in the first place. We've been cured ever since.

Last year we had a serious repair in our bathroom. His parents kept freaking out that we were paying someone to fix it. But they have a toilet that wobbles after they replaced the wax seal. Seriously, there is a whole generation of grandkids who are all terrified of using the potty there.

Exactly how it is for me!

My parents use a hotplate or electric skillet, because their range hasn't worked properly in 15+ years.

Different strokes for different folks. When I owned my house, my oven broke (the range itself still "mostly" worked, 3 out of 4 burners), and I replaced it the same day. When I rented later the range broke, and I nearly went out of my mind because it was being repaired under warranty and took over a month to resolve. Even though the oven was a separate unit and was still okay, as was the microwave, and we had 2 electric skillets, and electric griddle, and a 2-burner hot plate.

I'm cheap/thrifty in my own way though. I can't think of the last time I spent full price on a pair of shoes or piece of clothing though; it's thrift stores, eBay, outlet shops, and clearance rack 100%. (Actually, I can remember. I paid full-price for my wedding dress, which was an ivory bridesmaids dress, 6 months ago. Then I found another dress I liked better for $20 at Goodwill. Hah!)

My parent's kitchen, aside from a new refrigerator and a microwave, is exactly the same as it was when we bought the house in 1974. Rust red appliances, barely working oven and broken range. They have been waiting for my uncle to help them redo their kitchen as a favor since 1987. See, my father has helped him, so his brother is going to pay them back by building new cabinets and counter tops. Eventually...

My parent's kitchen, aside from a new refrigerator and a microwave, is exactly the same as it was when we bought the house in 1974. Rust red appliances, barely working oven and broken range. They have been waiting for my uncle to help them redo their kitchen as a favor since 1987. See, my father has helped him, so his brother is going to pay them back by building new cabinets and counter tops. Eventually...

No! Uncle is a carpenter, and AFAIK, my uncle has never volunteered or hinted that he would do the work, much less pro bono as my parents assume.

They did get the second bathroom renovated two years ago. The only part of it that worked before was the toilet and sink, the shower had not worked since they bought the house in 1974. Of course, there are only two people living there, versus five when I was a child.

Back in my college student days, I lived in an apartment in a building which was rented through the student housing office and there were four to the apartment (it was a female only building, except for the apartment manager and his wife). So, his go-to thing was tinfoil. Toilet running non-stop? Wrap the chain in tinfoil. Fridge not keeping cool? wrap the back in tinfoil.

Then there was the renter when my now-ex and I were co-managing an apartment building. She tried to break the lease and still get her deposit back on the grounds that the apartment was "dangerously cold". Unfortunately for her, the thermostats were controlled *by the tenant* and keeping the temperature down to 55 degrees was *her* choice and her lack of cleaning resulted in mold growths that required a lot of effort to clean.

What about the cheapos who push their trash onto you and then in the 1/100 times it turns out to be something nice or even great, they lose it. One of my friends got some old games and such from an aunt. She had been pushing her to take them for years, so my friend finally took them and was going to trash them. I came over and after a little googling and a couple of ebay auctions, she netted a little over $300 selling pieces from the torn up games to collectors who were missing pieces and selling a couple of games intact as hey were barely played with. Aunt lost it when she found out. This was in 1995 and my friend still hears about how she "ripped her poor aunt off".

That happened a lot when I was a kid. I would be given things or find things in horrible condition and spend time and money to bring it back to life and function and looking good. Inevitably, whoever gave me the item or decided they deserved it more would want it or want it back back and kick up such a stink it would get taken away from me and given back to them. I started refusing anything my family would give me and be called ungrateful . Meh

The last incident was my aunt had refinished a house and had junked a handmade bar top which another aunt grabbed and she left it outside for 3 years. It was in a very sorry state but due to the solid handmade quality it was salvageable with work. When aunt moved house she dumped the bar top on the nature strip (basically free game) and I made sure to ask aunt if I could have it and she said yes. Luckily I asked in front of an uncle because when I had refinished it and turned it into a very nice coffee table she wanted it back and went screeching to everyone that I had stolen it. Oh the phone calls I got!. Uncle got wind of it and told her to shove it. Said uncle had seen me ask and he had helped me refinish it so he knew what was going on. Still have the coffee table now.

I remembered something that's eyeroll-y. One Christmas, while I was still on speaking terms with my parents, my mother had only filled the boys' stockings, which was fine with me. But then a few days later I went over because she had something for me and turns out it was a paper bag from some place she'd gone shopping, filled with stuff she'd gotten as samples that she didn't want or couldn't use, or had used and didn't want the rest.

Now, this wouldn't be a problem as some of the stuff I did like and could use. But she called that my "stocking." I didn't say anything and did take it (lack of backbone) but she did get my "You have got to be kidding me." look.

Logged

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

My uncle refuses to pay for any repairs in his house. He has a bathtub in his KITCHEN - uninstalled, I should add, it's just standing on its end - because he doesn't know how to deal with it himself and won't pay for a plumber. My dad stayed with him a while back and offered to install it for him; my uncle was so insulted by the implication that he didn't know how to do it himself that he threw my dad out and never invited him back.

I love my father, but I'm starting to wonder if he is a cheapskate. I have a couple of examples:

My mother sometimes makes huge batches of certain foods to take with her when she visits friends or family who are often resting up from illnesses or are just in need of some of her food. She stores this food in those foil containers with cardboard lids and leaves some of them for myself and my father. She has always emphasised to me how reusing them is out of the question, as they aren't safe for such a thing, and even then they are too flimsy to keep their original, useful shape after use. Father saw me moving to throw a used container away and shouted at me about how wasteful I was being, how we could use it again etc. I tried to explain to him that it may not be the best of ideas, but I'm not very good at, well, talking. In the end I waited for him to leave the room and quietly disposed of the container (was that PA of me?)

He also goes to some odd lengths to save himself a few pennies. When we were in another country, he insisted we walk somewhere a long distance away during a storm to save money instead of getting a taxi. Rainstorms which, in this country, are really bad with heavy rain and strong winds. Despite my protests, as I had been living in the country for 5 months at that point and had experienced said storms, he insisted that it would be fine. He didn't lose out on any money, but he made everyone else very unhappy.

... he insisted we walk somewhere a long distance away during a storm to save money instead of getting a taxi. Rainstorms which, in this country, are really bad with heavy rain and strong winds. Despite my protests, as I had been living in the country for 5 months at that point and had experienced said storms, he insisted that it would be fine. He didn't lose out on any money, but he made everyone else very unhappy. ...

I think at that point I would have said "Fine, Dad. You go ahead and walk on and the rest of us will take a cab. We'll meet you at the [destination]. ~~ Taxi!!"

I love my father, but I'm starting to wonder if he is a cheapskate. I have a couple of examples:

My mother sometimes makes huge batches of certain foods to take with her when she visits friends or family who are often resting up from illnesses or are just in need of some of her food. She stores this food in those foil containers with cardboard lids and leaves some of them for myself and my father. She has always emphasised to me how reusing them is out of the question, as they aren't safe for such a thing, and even then they are too flimsy to keep their original, useful shape after use. Father saw me moving to throw a used container away and shouted at me about how wasteful I was being, how we could use it again etc. I tried to explain to him that it may not be the best of ideas, but I'm not very good at, well, talking. In the end I waited for him to leave the room and quietly disposed of the container (was that PA of me?)

He also goes to some odd lengths to save himself a few pennies. When we were in another country, he insisted we walk somewhere a long distance away during a storm to save money instead of getting a taxi. Rainstorms which, in this country, are really bad with heavy rain and strong winds. Despite my protests, as I had been living in the country for 5 months at that point and had experienced said storms, he insisted that it would be fine. He didn't lose out on any money, but he made everyone else very unhappy.

I think at that point I would have said "Fine, Dad. You go ahead and walk on and the rest of us will take a cab. We'll meet you at the [destination]. ~~ Taxi!!"

I was 19 at the time, and was still very incapable of standing up for myself. My mother, however, has no such qualms and declared rather forcefully that we were going back to the flat. She can be a forced to be reckoned with when angered.

I do love the man, but he can be a bit difficult sometimes

And thank you CakeEater, I'm glad you enjoy the username as an aside, these aren't the worst stories, at least in these ones he didn't put our safety in jeopardy.