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Monday, September 29, 2008

How long will we wait?

We had been very excited this weekend that we might receive our adoption referral today. We knew it was a bit of long shot, but there were a few indications we might be included. Today it looks like we will be waiting another month. It appears the cutoff is Feb 15, 2006. Our date is Feb. 17, 2006. While this means we are almost certainly in the next batch, I am a little disappointed today.

Lately, I have struggled with Banana wanting to tell her parents how we should parent. Today I am that spoiled child wanting to tell God how to do his job. Doesn't he know that we wanted to be home by Christmas, not face the possibility of having to be in China over Christmas. Doesn't he know how long we have waited? How we have accepted the cross of miscarriage?

The fact is, he does know all those things. Just as I see all the good in my dear Banana. He also knows that there is more to happiness than just getting what we want, even if we think we are right in what we want. His ways are not our ways and His thoughts are not our thoughts. I have prayed that His will be done in this adoption and this is another time I am being asked to live that. I can choose to be the spoiled child who cries and whines about not getting their way (right now that sort of sounds good) or I can choose to once more submit my will to God's will and hang in there till next month. I'll let you know what I decide in a few days :)

On a lighter note, those who know me know I love donuts, L-O-V-E donuts. So I couldn't help finding out what kind of donut I am. Imagine my surprise and delight when the results were in and I found I was my absolute favorite donut:

You Are a Boston Creme Donut

You have a tough exterior. No one wants to mess with you.

But on the inside, you're a total pushover and completely soft.

You're a traditionalist, and you don't change easily.

You're likely to eat the same doughnut every morning, and pout if it's sold out.

5 comments:

Oh honey, I'm sorry. I think what you're feeling is absolutely warranted. In your heart, you know it is His will, but we in our imperfect way, are not always good at the trusting part. Hang in there. I am praying for you today - and always - and wish I lived around the corner to bring you a cup of coffee.

You are one of the best Moms I know - you are an inspiration and I am blessed to have you in my life. Whenever it happens, you will be a wonderful Mommy to that long awaited for child.

The days are long, but the years are short...

I tell myself there are memories of my children I will never forget - and there are. There are also so many little day-to-day things that I do forget, or I forget how important they seemed, or the way they made me feel. This blog is to remind me of those little things.

About Me

I am a Catholic, SAH, homeschooling mom. I have six beautiful children, two through adoption. We also have many little ones in heaven praying for us. I have an amazing husband who tolerates my college football and coffee obsessions, he even cooks and mops the floor.
I am also blessed with a great extended family and good friends.