It is six months before our daughter Jenessa's joining to a healer, and I am understandably and nostalgically reminded of my own journey of love.

I am struck once again by the utter naturalness of the process of becoming in love, as my mother once phrased it. She likes that expression more than "falling", which makes it sound more like one is not making a volitional choice to a certain extent.

**

How would he respond to this, and how I can't wait to tell him that! That was the first sign of a deepening preoccupation.

And then, the musings started: how superb he would look in this or that, and that voice! And those eyes!

I kept a holostill of Nyota dressed in a formal evening gown at my workstation when we began working together.

She, naturally, noticed this and was touched greatly.

I could not offer a precise or concise explanation as to why it was there.

She asked me about bonding practices in my culture. I assured her she was not overstepping the bounds of our friendship by doing so.

When I told her that I had dissolved a prior contracted bonding, something in her dark eyes flashed -- could it possibly be relief?

This dissolution was of mutual satisfaction; the lady in question had found someone more compatible to her career and personality, and my increasing closeness to Nyota was something that could no longer be denied.

**

Our first kiss was electric in my veins. She returned it with all the enthusiasm and warm welcome that I could have hoped for, but didn't quite know I should expect. It might seem to have been an impulsive act, but her beauty, intelligence, humor, and open, warm nature made doing so inevitable.

The next day, we spoke of our future and she was in full agreement to deepen our relationship. Her eyes and voice and long, ardent kisses spoke for her.

She had wanted this for a very long time.

___

Nyota

We went out together on an "official" date a few days later. Dinner was easy, not awkward at all. We talked of many things with the comfort of truefriends.

The slow dances to a live band - now that was exhilarating! Being so close was sheer bliss for me.

We walked along the beach later with my hand clasped in his, by the light of a setting sun and rising moon; I could tell he was enjoying my pleasure in the whole evening.

We shared a gentle parting kiss and arranged to meet for breakfast the next day.

He filled my dreams that night, not for the first, or last, time.

+++++

Vaporizes! This pairing gooifies me better than any other, in any fandom, still!

How the most seemingly normal of conversations leads to something amazing! So like myriad threads in a tapestry.

The first one occurred after a poetry reading, with love in the abstract as a motivator and between life-mates and between those joined by family ties and of friendship as well.

"Love leads to compassion and selfless acts." I remarked, sipping my espresso thoughtfully. "You would doubtless find other ... explanations for such actions, but I would not believe you if you told me you did not, or could not, act out of selfless loyalty."

His eyes shone warmly. "Traditional vows speak of a bond that is unsevered and unseverable, of being near even while parted, and of touching heart, mind, and soul. A warrior in ancient times would guard his life-mate's very existence and personal well-being as dearer than his own."

I was touched. I had gotten that idea from Vulcan poetry and classical literature. But to hear it overtly spoken - sent happy thrills through me.

So, it was no surprise that as I took my reluctant leave (having to meet for breakfast with a study group the next day), I spoke softly, almost shyly: "I love you."

It spilled out - burbled out of a full heart.

***

When he spoke those words to me, it was after he told me I eased his preoccupations and provided much calm.

My heart soared and melted at the same time.

***

Not too long after, we were speaking of the meld and also of how it differed from an underlying continual bond which could be intensified or attenuated at will.

The latter exists between life-mates and the baseline strength grows as the affection and time together grows. I found this prospect delightful in the extreme. I did not balk in the slightest in knowing, and being known, so completely as to my thoughts and feelings, desires, memories, and hopes.

Knowing him so well ... that idea was one that filled me with the keenest eagerness and anticipation.

**

When we joined minds, it was easy and natural, smooth as slipping oars into water. The panorama of his mind was a thing of exquisite textures and hues to me, like a rainbow and like a silken wrap, in whose folds I snuggled.

I wriggled my mental toes in the warmth and sweetness of contact. It was like basking in a spring meadow, full of blooming flowers and radiant sunshine.

**

A day or so later, I wore an outfit which included Gaila's 2-inch high red boots. They were exquisite on me, if I do say.

After a slow dance, many long kisses and slow, savoring caresses on both sides made me feel giddy with the rightness. In the wake of a deeper meld a couple days before, the touch was intense - much more so - immediately, and I could tell the interweaving would not be transitory.

/Nyota?" Was the quiet query as I took an adoring nibble of one of those as-good-as-chocolate (if not better!) ears of his.

**

I paused in my eagerly tender caresses.

If we "took the plunge", there would be no going back. This would be a commitment for ever and always.

/Yes!/ Was my unreserved, unhesitant answer to it all.

We made our way back to my large thermo-gel bed, divesting ourselves of all we had on -- and indulging in more distracting caresses.

***

He was ineffably gentle, and we took our sweet time. We commingled our essences in a blaze of speechless wonder and transcendence.

Is this what it is like for Jedi? I thought dazedly. Lands, my darling heart doesn't need to use the Force!

***

Somewhere during that breathlessly fantastic interlude, the song called In Her Eyes came to mind.

I just got to read these in one delicious sitting, and I have to say that I am a puddle of melted Mira-shaped goo. You still got it, Deb - there is such a tangible, soulful connection you show between these two, and it warms the heart to read.

Mira, when I read of a little sprite of a sweetie in the Saga called Miracle, Mira for short, it was you I thought of !!!!

As for a tangible, soulful connection - that's how I envision their bond -- something so sweet and pervasive you could touch it and feel it singing through each vein, with each breath. Woot! There I go again!

After separate vacations home, Nyota and I would speak of our time with family.

Or rather, she would regale me, her eyes laughing and sparkling.

I would gaze upon her animation and exuberant gladness and appreciatively and gratefully reflect upon her having a warm, convivial family. It was what she deserved, by her gentle warmth and loving nature.

On this occasion, she suddenly paused in her recitation and grinned apologetically. "I'm monopolizing the conversation, and probably boring you to no end with my ..."

"Love, you could never and have never been remotely boring to me." I assured sincerely.

She laughed. "Thank you for saying so. Sweet heart of mine, tell me about your time home." She gazed at me expectantly.

I tightened my hold around her shoulders.

***

"My father and I have a complex relationship; even when there is not an overt disagreement, there are times when there are times when there is an undercurrent of tension. Unfortunately, my Mother is oftenest caught in the middle."

Her dark eyes were soft and empathetic. "I can understand that, loving you both, wanting things to be smooth between you, and also seeing both sides of whatever the issue is." She commented.

"That is precisely it, as they say, in a nutshell." I affirmed.

Her next question was insightful indeed, as she stroked my shoulder gently: "How much of all that is misperception and/or preconception?"

I crushed her even closer. "Doubtless quite a lot, as I reflect upon it."

**

Rather than even lightly tease that all that was " very Humanly fallible " of us, she just said: "Just don't forget to recall the good times in all the stressfulness and that they genuinely love and are proud of you." She added with a rueful sigh: "Kashore and our parents had a rough phase, but they never lost sight of those inviolable truths and it got them through quite a bit more easily than otherwise. The loving foundation was a great deal of the incentive to do, not just try, to get along."

**

We moved onto other topics then, and the next day, I decided to gift Nyota with a large box of rarest, rich chocolate truffles, as a tangible thank you.

"My own, you are an unfailing and invaluable confidante." I wrote in the attached note.

She was very pleased with the gift, and expressed her thanks back most ... pleasurably.

It entailed a slow massage while I was able to feast upon her in a satiny sheath dress, which clung to her most excellently.

"I do love you." She whispered at the end.

Nyota stretched out beside me as I started to give her a massage, kneading her silken shoulders, pausing to tickle her sides, which evoked a laugh.

I leaned to kiss the nape of her neck and whispered in her ear: "And I cherish you, completely."