As 2008 fades into memory, time for one last award ceremony: for those who brightened this column last year.

Most Shameless Disclosure: Sir David Attenborough for telling Salford students studying for an MA in wildlife documentaries that the sound of polar bears crossing the ice in his films was achieved by shaking custard powder in pair of silk tights. Was the national treasure abashed at this latest example of BBC perfidy? He was not: "Actually, I'd argue it was wholly responsible. Polar bears are dangerous animals."

Penitent of the Year:Jeremy Clarkson for disclosing his bank details in his Sunday Times column to ridicule public fears about information security. £500 was immediately taken from his account and a direct debit set up for payments to the British Diabetic Association: "I was wrong and I have been punished for my mistake," said Clarkson, a sadder, if not wiser, man.

Least Successful Movement:Kelvin MacKenzie's Red Mist party, set up after the former Sun editor became agitated when car parking fees went up by 43% at Weybridge station in Surrey. After being solidly beaten by the Tory incumbent in a local council poll, MacKenzie commented: "People can't be expected to know who I am a few weeks before an election." Oh no?

Witchfinder General Award:Ken Starr, Bill Clinton's nemesis in the Monica Lewinsky affair, who has been recruited by opponents of gay marriage in California to lead their legal fight to annul the partnerships that took place in 2008.

Least Successful Endorsement:American lawyer Lynn Forester de Rothschild, wife of Sir Evelyn, owner of a large slice of Buckinghamshire, who abandoned the Democrats to back John McCain in the summer because Barack Obama was too elitist.

Most Magnanimous Restaurateur: Gordon Ramsay, for saying Michael Winner "has a palate like a cow's backside".

Most Unlikely Comparison:Kevin Spacey for suggesting the plot of his confusing film The Usual Suspects was like the government: "No matter how many times you watch, you don't quite understand what's going on."

Least Expected Admission:Britney Spears to Rolling Stone magazine: "I go to bed at, like, 9.30 every night ... I feel just like an old fart."stephen.bates@theguardian.com