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Tuesday, 6 May 2014

Blown It

It was Edmund Burke who wrote: "All it takes for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing." Or in the case of the Premier League, all it takes is a bloody ludicrous eleven minutes of fuck-witted football suicide.
Throwing away a title has never been quite so inept, has it? A title that was still eminently possible has been chucked away like a chocolate wrapper out of a chav's car window.

This wasn't so much looking a gift horse in the mouth as dicing the poor nag into a thousand tiny pieces and handing it back to Tesco's lasagne suppliers all wrapped up in a pretty bow with a serving suggestion on the side.

All season long those of us who longed for someone other than the Super-Duper Rich to buck the trend and win the title have been worried that at the heart of their defence was a chasm as deep as the Marianas Trench. And so it proved at Selhurst Park, against a team that were the joint lowest scorers in the league.

If Palace can get three against you (Cardiff managed the same) you have a problem. Liverpool's back four have looked great this season - going forward. Skrtel has been scoring for fun at one end and creating a lot of fun for opponents at the other. Sakho has been the one on the end of golden chances in recent games and has shown all the finishing prowess of road-sign. Flanagan and Johnson have raided forward brilliantly but get a nose-bleed when they're on the edge of their own box.

Of course this is partly why we have enjoyed Liverpool so much this season. Even at 3-3 divine intervention almost arrived but the ball fell to Moses, who promptly failed to do the Lord's bidding and shinned it horribly.
Yes, this has been Keegan's Newcastle revisited. And I'd hold Rodgers a little bit responsible for the recent slip-ups. His team has been naïve and so has he.

After Mourinho's miserable unseating of the champions elect, with Rodgers unable to change tack during the game, the draw at Palace reeked of complacency - a complacency that was sown from the moment Your Man Bren suggested that the goal difference between them and Citeh could be made up in two games. A ludicrous statement even if a 5-0 victory against Pardew's Petit Filous is a formality.

At 3-0 after 50-odd minutes, Liverpool pressed forward in numbers hoping to bag another fifteen. After Delaney equalised Liverpool got a corner and put seven men in the Palace penalty area. Dim.

Dwight Gayle's brace, accomplished with no little class had as much to do with the absence of defenders around him. Liverpool were as madcap an outfit as the Crazy Gang* - which is appropriate given Flanagan and Allen were in the team.

So the dream is over, unless Aston Villa can grab all three points at the Etihad on Wednesday. As I said, the dream is over.

Now there'll be those that, will point out that when all's said and done this has been a wonderful, transformational season for LFC. Well, yes. But the point is that after the defeat of Citeh at home the title was theirs to lose. And they lost it. Luis was crying. That's not a good season.

But it's a better season than the ones experienced by fans of Cardiff and Fulham. Once again club chairmen have been the architects of their own downfall. In a season of deeply average performances by teams near the bottom I reckon Malky Mackay might well have been able to keep the Bluebirds (that's the team playing in red) up. Vincent Tan will disagree but reports suggest that that is his default response to everything.

Fulham have played silly buggers all season and even Magath, armed with relentlessly black and white spectacles and a sunny disposition, was unable to convince them that they were at a club that knew what they were doing.

Norwich, plucky and goal-shy, will join them after Sunderland, in an awe-inspiring run of result that has seen them dig their way out of trouble (I could've sworn I saw Conor Wickham shaking dirt out of his shorts during the win at Chelsea), grab the one point they need. The Canaries centre-forward options of Hooper, Van Wolfswinkel and Elmander make Chelsea look like they're awash with cracking No.9s.

And talking of Chelsea, well it's not been that great has it? Even Rafa bagged a bit of tin in his interim season. What's this new bloke done eh? Nowt. Just bored the pants of us. The question is, after a trophyless season punctuated by falling out with his best player, why is Abramovic indulging this specialist in failure?

(The other one has succeeded again with the Gooners striding over the line as if it was never in doubt and if he wins the FA Cup I'd be asking the victory parade to take in a piece of the Kings Road if I was Arsene.)

And so a very exciting finish is likely to be a bit damp squibbish come next Sunday. I suppose there's an outside chance that Andy Carroll might nut in a trio of magnificent headers and turn logic on its head. And England might just be dark horses for the World Cup.

5th (and out of CL place) again. City (the Light Blue Meanies?) will spoil the fairytale ending, but Liverpool have only themselves to blame for last night. Pulis again doing a fantastic job with Palace.

Quite right Robbo.Naive all the way.I know hindsight is a wonderful thing,but Bren could see how Chelsea set themselves up at Anfield,knowing a point would still leave them ahead and yet he went all gung ho,playing into Maureen's hands.

3-0 up with 11 minutes to go?Shut up shop and leave City under pressure for the Villa game.

As a true Red Mancunian, yes one actually born in Manchester and not an adopted son with a strange southern accent I was mortified by my unlikely sympathy for our greatest and most hated rival, the scouse gits from the East Lancs road. I put it down to feeling bad for Gerrard but more likely to not wanting City or Chelsea to win. The sad lesson to be learnt from Liverpool's self inflicted loss will be the loss of exciting full throttle attacking football in favour of more maureenesque, parking the bus in front of goal and nipping out like the odd rabbit from it's warren to nick a carrot.Exciting season though, disappointing for us reds and about same as usual for all you Spurs, and Arsenal fans. If we loose against Hull some of the supposed United fans will be shouting for Giggsy's head. There is nothing so fickle as a football fan.Look out for Hull by the way, the dark horses and Arsenal have a history of bottling it when they get the crap kicked out of them..go Brucey.

I have my reservations, but something akin to the Spanish or German models might work (at least one division below parent club, no cup competitions), with an age cap of 23 and no on-loan players and you might be getting somewhere. Not quite sure how to introduce them, though...

Nice one Robbo, but I will slightly disagree in as much as I think L'pool should look at this as a great season.

They might not of been able to hold on when it mattered most, but neither could Chelsea, nor Arsenal, the team that spent the longest amount of time at the top of the pile. AH made a great point on the previous blog about their "gung ho attitude," it's what got them there in the first place but ultimetly may prove their downfall, still, I respect the effort and they've looked great doing it and surely made a lot of friends with their exciting play.

It all goes to the entertainment v results discussion we've had here, I would pay good money to watch the Mickeys, but I wouldn't give the steam off my piss to be at a Chav game. (Unless it was to watch Terry and Cashley cry)

It's been a fantastic year for Liverpool FC. Back in CL, 2nd spot and an absolutely marvellous style of football. So we lose/draw once in a while but win most of the time. We didn't lose the title because of the way we played Palace. We lost it because we did not play this way against West Brom, Aston Villa and Hull. Best case scenario, we buy a couple defenders who can defend, but as long as we keep playing like this, I won't complain.

Next season is going to be interesting. United will have Van Gaal and apparently 200 millions to spend. City are going to get Messi for $165 million, and Chelsea will probably buy everyone else, so its going to be a tough fight for 4th place between the gunners, spurs and us (everton will Europa'd). Seeing as our targets are currently Caulker, Konoplyanka and Micah Richards, we could be struggling.

What, with David Moyes available 'n' all? (Sorry, couldn't resist one more shot). I wish her success - perhaps in a decade or so, she'll be arriving at Chelsea having won wherever she's been, calling herself the Special One, and carrying on the tradition of enigmatic Portuguese managers at said club. Just hoping she plays a more open style - no, that was NOT a sexist double entendre. Well, not intentionally. I mean, I typed it, then I read it, then I chuckled. That doesn't count, does it?

Both Liverpool and (to a lesser extent) City have got where they have by playing exciting attacking football.so fair enough. Yes, I'd rather Liverpool (because of the financial doping at City), and i don't think this is over yet. City still have to win their games. They SHOULD win them ...

Manchester City are set to be fined £50m and will have to contest next season's Champions League with a squad size limited to 21 players, after being found guilty of breaching UEFA's financial fair play rules.==========================================Yes, that's definitely going to ensure compliance now isn't it. What a joke.

The money fine is indeed a bit silly to a club that spends from a bottomless pit, however the squad restriction could hurt a bit, because I believe (I could be wrong) that they still have to have 8 home grown amoung those 21. Also, the squad has to be submitted before the CL begins, lose a few players to injury and you're looking at a tough time to put out a strong starting squad, which in turn may lead to fatigue.

I'll agree it's not what I hoped, but it's a start. Man Citeh, will ofcourse appeal, which means itcould get worse, we'll just have to wait and see.

Other clubs can also complain if they don't think the punishment is harsh enough.

H2H, the money fine is required because how else will UEFA bribe Blatter to overlook their bribes but not bribes from other federations?

I say knock 'em down to 18 senior players (with 8 home grown) but allow unlimited u18s. If they break the rules again, ban them from Europe for a year. (Or better yet, force them to play in Europa league...) Which of course means they won't make enough money to support themselves and will thus earn a 5-year ban. Which brings us back to using those u18s they blooded...

Also, take a bow Sunderland and Poyet. What a turnaround with the toughest possible run-in. I guess that's what happens when you stick with a manager. All relegated teams replaced their managers when they were in higher positions.

True, and all replaced them with people who had no experience of the PL (Magath had a good record fighting relegation in Germany, though). Palace showed what's possible by replacing the manager early, and with a manager (Pulis) with experience. Both Poyet and Pulis have done great jobs this season.

Current suggestion going round is that City should be docked points for failing to comply with FFP rules. You can't do it for this season, but it's worth the league considering for the future. Failing to comply with FFP is gaining a financial advantage just as surely as going into Administration is. Docked 10 points at start of following season might be an idea.

Cos no one bothered to investigate? The original Real scam went something like this:City Council owns Real training ground in centre of Madrid.Council sells ground to club at value (small). Council gives them another piece of land (outside city) for new training ground)Council grants planning consent on old training ground. Value rockets.Club sells old training ground.

And that, my friends, is how you can afford to buy a team of galacticos.

Ideas include.... -Reserve teams, with a new league to accommodate them as they enter the pyramid. -"A phased reduction in the number of non-home-grown players in Premier League squads from 17 to 12, reaching their target by 2021." -"A cap of two non-EU players per squad"-"A ban on non-EU players outside of the Premier League."

First idea might work. The next three are xenophobic bullshit. If they catch on, the PL coughs up the crown as top league immediately. Nobody will stick around to wait for the changes to slowly creep in and suck the fun out of the game. If only young Brits were willing to develop elsewhere if underappreciated at home. Or, perhaps, they were trained to be good enough to avoid bringing in those crazy foreigners who are taking all your football jobs....

Or am I crazy? (For my opinion, in addition to the many, many other reasons...)

-"A cap of two non-EU players per squad"-"A ban on non-EU players outside of the Premier League."

Absolutely horrible. As if we want a cap on the amazing South American and African players, to say nothing of the occasional Ozzie, American, Japanese, Korean, Egyptian, etc player who makes their mark. Hopefully this will fail, as the FA tends to.

B Teams might work if they had a requirement that 12 members of the squad must have been at the club at least three years, and all players have to be 23 or younger. It wouldn't stop top clubs from signing the players, but it would slow the stocking up (or force it earlier, I suppose), and would keep clubs from holding on to anyone for too long just to play with the B side.

Maybe you could restrict the first-team squad to white, land-owning voters who can pass a literacy test. Might thin the talent pool, but at least you know everyone was British. Then you can watch all the good players in Spain, or wherever else they end up instead of the PL.

The only way I'd see it working is if each league were a closed system - i.e., no more promotion/relegation. And THAT boat ain't gonna fly with a bird in the hand by the skin of its teeth, obviously! But if Dykes can have his say, then damn it, so can I. So here's my plan to rui-er, improve, improve! English football. You're welcome, in advance!

The result would be similar to the minor leagues in baseball in America. The teams at each level (single, double, and triple-A) are affiliated with a parent club in the major leagues, and many have long histories and strong community ties themselves (Durham Bulls, right, Stephen?). Their main purpose is to develop talent to supply the majors. Players move up and down according to readiness and form. There are also some independent minor leagues and teams as well.

Now in England, the analogy would be the Championship (AAA), League One (AA), and League Two (A). These would become the minor leagues (I can hear the howling (in appreciation of genius, I assume) already). You could divide by talent/readiness to move to the next level, age, boot size, or a mix of criteria. Obviously, Liverpool, owned by the same group who own the Boston Red Sox baseball club, would be familiar with this, and John Henry could make some helpful suggestions.

Next would come affiliation with a parent club in the Prem. My first suggestion - Millwall as West Ham's Championship affiliate! My second - Bolton and Middlesbrough tied to PL clubs THEY hate! I'm making lots of new friends, I can just feel it.

As the number of clubs in each league is unbalanced, we'd need to add/subtract from the leagues to even them. I suggest a lottery from the lower leagues for immediate and permanent promotion to the PL - one each from C'ship, L1, and L2. That gives us 23 in each league. Wimbledon could return to the top flight from near the bottom of League Two! Or along the same lines, who wouldn't want to see Man City v Dag & Red twice a year?

Okay, I think I've taken this inane ramble about as far as- I mean, problem solved! Time to submit it to the FA. It's time for American Baseball to save Football in England!

One word from me to Greg 'blatter' Dyke...'shove it up your fucking arse you dopey cunt'

League 3 of B teams allowed to get promoted to league 1....what a bag O shite. Whose going to turn out to watch port vale play crystal palace B team? You'd end up with a league 1 of premiership B teams. It would kill the competition.

According to Greg Dyke,all the PL teams are in favour of this.Well of course they are Greg you clown.The FA lost any sense of relevance when it allowed the PL to be created and ceded all it's powers to the PL.

This plan is supposed to mean more English players will come through.No it won't Greg,for 2 reasons.

1.The transfer system is a joke.Clubs pay an extra premium for any English player (Jordan Henderson worth £18 million?Compare Andy Carroll at £35 million to Luis The Cannibal for £27 million)

2.Coaching of youngsters in this country is still Victorian.Lump it to the big lad up front,physical power and presence.No wonder all our players can trap a ball further than I can kick it.

Start at the grass roots by getting the 6/7/8/ year olds of this country working on technique and being comfortable on the ball.

Another area that needs to be looked at is the fans.An example being Tevez at Un**ed.A lot of my customers wanted him to stay because "he puts in a good shift" (which is a fucking awful statement.It's hardly 12 hours in a factory is it?)I can run around for 90 minutes as well,does that mean I can play up front for a PL team?We still want our defenders to hoof it clear,head it away,long ball up the park.I'm not suggesting we go as far as tikka-takka but should look at,for example,Ze German national team that play direct football,but use the ball rather than just lump it away up front.

I suppose we go through this conversation every 2 years after the WC and Euros,so it makes a change to have it before the WC starts.

What the hell? City have "not yet agreed a deal" on sanctions for violating FFP? What kind of governing body is UEFA if rich clubs can negotiate their punishments? (The kind that is like any other governing body in sport or politics, apparently) I'm in complete agreement with Wenger on this. Violate FFP? No European football, full stop. National FA's can deal with point deductions for clubs trying to buy their own league titles.

As to the 4-point plan, agree with the anti- crowd above. Just a moneymaking ploy, will put smaller clubs out of business, seemingly no thought to relegation/promotion, etc. If there is no youth development, then there will be no down-the-road benefit to the national side - hence, this plan will not do what it says on the tin. Tell Dykes to get his finger out...

As Jack says the problem is youth coaching, which the fa don't seem to give a shit about. It's left to more or less clueless dads to do it, by and large. With my the boys all soccer mad over ten years I've seen one good coach, a couple of ok ones and six our seven well intentioned but creep coaches. The mental side is equally important add the physical with young kids, get it wrong and talented kids will give it up. Seen it happen. There should be advisors for all youth leagues.

Old Dykeheads fucking idiotic suggestion of a league 3, which asks lower league clubs with proud supporters and hundred year histories to nobly sacrifice themselves for the good of the premiership clubs. Whether it would in fact benefit the national side I doubt very much without deeper reforms. Germany's B teams, with their inevitably uunsetled line ups don't seem from what I've read to have helped.

If there's a black hole between academy and first team why not have aB league competition. You'd get the usual suspects but high performing academies lower down might pull a few surprises. You'd then get to see which coaching system's are doing their job. Play them on a Wednesday night, charge a few quid you'd get a reasonable crowd to see the stars of tomorrow playing each other.

FA needs to be reminded it stand for the interests of all its clubs not just the prem. The league 3 idiocy has just over shadowed what ever other proposals they've made. They're forever making proposals aren't they the FA. We need action and that will never happen when it's a retirement home for amateurs in blazers. We need people like Gary Neville running the show not that dopey cunt Dyke and his past it self important dilettante ilk.

Managers son syndrome should be a registered medical condition. Usually the worst player in the team but the one who never gets dubbed and had a 50/50 chance of player of the year and/or to be the one who gets the biggest public bollockings, do your sons a favour and don't manage their team.

Hats off to the volunteers though, with fuck all support from fa our the clubs, sometimes, they give up their time for the common good, something I've never been willing to do.

WHAT IF.....Andre Marriner was put in charge of selecting the England team (you have to imagine Roy hodggsson dressed up as Carol voldemort our whatever het name is)

Er...ill have two white ones please Carol. Thank you. And a black one. Aaand another white one. And a black one. Sorry can I change that for a different black one? Thanks. Oh ay that's the same one intit? Oh and another two white ones.....etc

WHAT IF.....Andre Marriner was put in charge of selecting the England team (you have to imagine Roy hodggsson dressed up as Carol voldemort our whatever het name is)

Er...ill have two white ones please Carol. Thank you. And a black one. Aaand another white one. And a black one. Sorry can I change that for a different black one? Thanks. Oh ay that's the same one intit? Oh and another two white ones.....etc

Just a thought on the problems with English football, a topic that has made a regular appearance at Robbo's going back to the bbc days (don't recall Robbo writing too many blogs on the subject though.)

You can make a case against poor coaches at junior level and a dwindling pool of players to pick from and blame the fa and the pl. What I think the main problem is, is our attitude to sport. Let's face it, we're pretty much shit at all sports that we compete in.. every now and then an Englishman/woman will emerge a champion but in general we are fucking useless and I put it down to attitude or lack of it. I can remember being told, while growing up in Upper Clapton, by parents, relatives, sports teachers and football and cricket coaches alike, "It's not winning that counts but how you play the game." That sort Of attitude towards sport will maybe win you a number of friends but fuck all else.

I never heard it said in Australia, except in more recent years by a new breed of social worker who are trying to remove the importance of winning from 5-6 year-olds in sporting events. In Australia it's all about winning. There is no second place, if you don't win you are nothing. That may seem a bit harsh but when you look at what Aussie sportsmen and women have achieved compared to their English counterparts it seems to have held them in good stead.

Don't be surprised if The Aussies win the WC before another Engkand team manage it

Of course there are major cultural shifts in play, "everybody gets a trophy" is nice but the competitive kids, the ones who have a chance to make it (if they have talent and coaching) see right through that shit and they don't want a trophy unless they win. There's first and there's losers. The talent pool has been dramatically diluted though with other sports gaining prominence and all the other choices that kids are faced with, 2hours of video games or computer or tv often beats 2 hours of kickin' a ball around. Football just isn't that important to a high percentage of English kids any more.

Sorry disagree me old digital pal s but that old Trophies for all thing has come and gone in English schools. And there's still a million football mad kids playing of a weekend. We're still producing world class players EPL is the best league in the world and we p retty much won the Olympics, medal wise, per capita. Australia has the highest levels of obesity in the world. Our problem isn't attitude in terms of motivation Bo but structurally and philosophically. The prem is set up for the financial benefit o f the top few clubs, fuck the national team, just as Lo n Don is sucking the life blood out off the country. Great for Russian oligarchs. Scotland are about to vote for independence from the kkleptocracy and who can blame them.

The FA are a sad little analogy for modern England which is still a fuckinfg great little country utterly betrayed by those with moral responsibility to act in the common good, who have surrendered power to those with money, presumably in return for money.

Well, that defender of all that is right and good and fair, Shola Amoebi, has been booked TWICE in rapid-fire succession for dissent. Honestly, that evil Phil "I live in the Kop's hip pocket" Dowd must be stopped. :)

I've been reading the rhetoric and bravado on Sky and the Beeb about great achievement and greatest league in the world and I'm afraid it all just sounds like empty words.

The best team won, the one with the most moolah, the one that pays over the odd wages and transfer fees, the one that pisses in the face of FFP and can literaly buy any player they want......what's so great about that?

It would of been a "great achievement" if Liverpool had managed to do it, or Arsenal, even more so if a team like Everton did it and I don't mean that in a condesending way.

Arsenal were on top of the pile for the largest part of the season but ended up in our regular Star Wars position, which was guarenteed last week (May the Fourth be with us) 79 points a better tally then last season and if we can add an FA Cup win to that then it could be soon as an improvement and probably about where we should be punching due to our weight.

Liverpool surprised many and could of won it. I think the inexperience of being in that position was what killed them in the end. Many will point to the fact that they weren't involved in Europe as a factor that they did so well. I'll reserve judgement until next year when they will be playing in the CL. I'm sure the players and the manager will be stronger for this years experience though.

Chelsea ended up empty handed which ofcourse pleases me no end, I don't like Maureen (just in case you hadn't noticed) I don't like his arrogant attitude, his disrespect of other managers, his hypocrisy and negative tactics. For the rest he's probably a great guy though. ;) He'll now open his little ponybank and splash out on (a few) world class strikers, because having the likes of Torres (50mill) Ba, Eto o (former highest paid player on the planet) and Lukaku (surplus to requirements) just wasn't enough this season. Maybe he could recall one of the 26 players they have loaned out to improve his little horse of a team.

Everton under Martinez looked good, just failing to get to the promised land of the CL, if they were battling against any other team I would of wanted them to do it, but again, I think it was inexperience that did for them too in the end. Spurs splashed out 110 mill to finish a place lower then the previous term, getting rid of yet another manager in the process and replacing him with a subsitute teacher, Timmy gets a lot of grief, mostly from his own supporters, but did you know he has a beter win percentage then any previous Spertz manager in the PL? Levy will probably can his arse though.

If you're looking for the real surprise of the season then look no futher then 7th placed United. The total capulation of the team that won the CL at a canter last term has been of Titanic proportions and delighted many a supporter worldwide. In the end it was almost sadening to see how far they've sunk.........

I keep refreshing the Spurs homepage waiting for news of Timmy's sacking. Any second now....

No matter the England squad that is released later, I'm sure they'll be some shite in there. Either too many of the old fuckers who are past it (I'm looking at you Fat Frank), or too many Utd players who are too shit, and only in the team because of who they play for (I'm looking at you Cleverly, Jones, Smalling, Welbeck). Let's hope Roy finds a happy medium. Maybe Glenn Hoddle knows one.

I hate reading all the pundits saying how all the neutrals wanted Liverpool to win the league. Well I was neutral, and I wanted City to win. I don't know any City fans, but I have a lot of Liverpool supporting mates who all got a bit too smug for my liking this season. So that's why I wanted City to win.

Speaking of smug people (me), I've only gone and won the most prestigious fantasy sports competition in the entire solar system - the Jacks H2H league. What's my prize? Free haircut at your establishment, Jacks?

ROBBO

I am Derek Robbo Robson. From Middlesbrough. My blog was on the BBC for years. I talk about sport. And nowt much else. If you like sport, you'll like this. If you don't like sport you should read it any road cos you should like sport. What's wrong with yer?