Sex and the City meets the Dalai Lama. Buns and Marty use their lively escapades to ignite an authentic inquiry into themselves ... an emotionally-naked exposé baring all.
Their keen observations of life’s twists and turns will inspire you to use your obstacles as a path to your heart’s desire.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

IT'S RAW AND SO AM I

It’s amazing
who comes into your life just when you need a prod in the right direction.
Those jolts only hurt if we resist…but I am getting ahead of myself.

I have never been a huge fan of back adjustments
and just the thought of being cracked into shape when I am in pain or spasm is
too much to contemplate. I only found myself on a chiropractors table because my
Chinese Medicine Doctor http://www.tanyagee.com/home.html( she is a real treasure) spoke so highly of him and he was just down
the hall, plus after acupuncture, pain killers, and heating pads, my lower back
was refusing to co operate and relax. Let’s call this state desperate.

I had been in agony all week, couldn’t walk or
sit kind of agony, muscles spasms so fierce it made me want to cry like a baby.
I told him I didn’t much like adjustments. He said if you can’t touch the floor
after I am done with you on the table we may have to adjust, but let’s see what
your body wants. And with that he started pulling and stretching and digging
into my muscles while at the same time getting me to dish. He mentions the
connection between the lower back and emotional issues of loss and transition. I
start talking…yup lots of that going on. I spill my guts, feelings ooze down my
cheeks and I am no longer focused on his physical maneuverings, I am letting
go.

“Do you know what this is intuitively, he
asks. I nod. “You don’t have to take on other people’s pain”, he says.

Yup, those
lights bulbs are popping as I agree that is what I do when there is extreme
loss and I feel powerless to help those I love, those who are suffering.

I let go of that too and in that moment so did
my back. I bounced off the table and touched my toes. None of this is the prodding I was referring
to, it was the prelude.

I came back
a week later for a tune up. “Oh so you drink greens”, he said as he eyed my thermos
filled with blended spinach, kale, sprouts and parsley. Somehow this lead to me
talking about my slow metabolism and how unfair it was that I eat so healthy
and yet cannot easily lose weight. That’s when he got firm and refused to
accept my responses. "Do you want to lose weight?" he said.

“Of course,”
I replied.

“Then you
will! Make a commitment, you have to want it.”

“I want it.
I want it. I also want ease and softness and living with a gracious relaxed quality.”
I insist.

“Oh you want
your cake and to eat it too. “he smiles. “Do you realize you have just described
your body?”

I don’t get it for a second. Soft, easy,
relaxed? Really?

“Why not just
accept yourself the way you are? “he offers.

Yes I have
been here before. But here is the smack
down. He refuses to accept my story or reasons for why the weight doesn’t just drop
off. He challenges my ego and I like it. After
listening to myself, ‘yeah but’ him for almost an hour I finally hear it
myself. The story I am running with is no different than when clients of mine
complain about a situation and yet rather than staying committed to action that
would change it, keep reinforcing it by believing themselves powerless. By believing
the details are real they actually limit the outcome. Worse yet…generate the
outcome.

Now I don’t
have a lot of tolerance for repetitive stories and you can imagine how hard I
laughed when it landed that I was doing just that. Looping around ‘not fair’, ‘can’t
do it unless I starve myself’, ‘slow metabolism’, ’soooo unfair’. Well hell…maybe my metabolism is slow…so
what!I can guarantee it will stay that
way if I keep repeating those words.

I realize that
if I created my story, I can also drop it and create a new one.

And that is
the plan. Physically, emotionally, spiritually….I am dropping my story. I am
leaving my name at the door because our names are the identity part of ourselves
that hold the story. I am claiming my power to shift my perception and create
any desired outcome.

So I want my
cake and I want to eat it too. Yup, that’s what I want. Thanks Doc, both for
fixing my back and sticking up for the truth that we may not be able to control
everything that happens in life but we definitely can control the way we
perceive it.

If you are a
fan of light bulb moments and tuning into your body/mind connection this is the
chiropractor for you.

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How it all began

Our sons were friends. Like brothers really. We mothers had never met but both our guys kept saying we should. Then Duncan passed away. It was through Marty's support of Buns' grieving her son that a deep friendship was forged.

Duncan inspired us. If his life, at 22, could get snuffed out like that, without any warning, then why wouldn't we live each day to the max ... grateful for every second, whether mundane or profound?

Really, we're not interested in writing just about the happy times. We are interested in also using the pain, the sorrow, the disappointments -- the realities of life -- to stretch and grow.

Inherent in everything that happens, at the heart of it lies love. Sometimes it doesn't look like love. We have to go through all the layers of ourselves authentically and feel them in order to reveal that essence.

But hey. It's not all serious. We have a blast. We go blindly into spontaneous adventures that some might consider reckless (Marty's word), or random (Buns' word), but regardless, whatever it is we are doing, we are awake and choosing to live out loud.

If you want to catch all the glorious details of the Buns and Marty escapades, you can start with our first post under Blog Archive (November 2010 -- Today has already been amazing -- and read the posts from bottom to top).

A BUNS & MARTY UPDATE!

Being big believers in "passion meets purpose", we want to support our writing addiction in a totally decadent, seriously fun way. We are working together and inspiring people to make significant lifestyle changes by sharing our experience with the most awesome nutritional and natural products. The side effects are so extreme they include a warning... increased energy, heightened clarity, improved athletic performance, youthful aging, and last but not least... weight release. And it includes chocolate! Yes, good for you, mood-stabilizing, vitamin B-infused, green tea chocolate. Seriously fun, seriously fine.