God Bless This Lube

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God Bless This Lube

Editor's note: Some links in this story lead to adult material and are not suitable for viewing at work. All links of this nature will be noted with "NSFW" after them.\—

I have gathered my myrrh with my spice;

I have eaten my honeycomb with my honey

Christians sometimes get a bad rap in sex-positive writing. Some of them deserve it, considering how loudly they protest the existence of any type of sex-tech, from vibrators to online pornography to the Plan B emergency contraception pill.

And yet, when I went home last weekend to visit my family, I was surrounded by Christians and not one of them had any interest in whether anyone else owned a sex toy, looked at porn or took birth control.

I grew up in a typical American small town that has now reached a whopping 50,000 residents. Most of the listings in the community events section of the local paper are church-sponsored activities. The trucks are American, the bumper stickers say Bush/Cheney and no one would dare open a restaurant here without installing at least one deep-fat fryer.

(And if you're going to Denny's on a Sunday morning, get there before church lets out if you don't want to wait an hour for a table.)

I don't write much about religion, although in college I minored in the history of Christianity. But I do know that most Americans have sex, most Americans believe in God or a higher power, and most Americans identify with some sort of religion. Of those, the majority are Christian.

It stands to reason that some Christians already know all about adult products while others secretly long to know more but don't know who to ask.

Those are the customers that Book22 seeks to attract. Book22, named for the twenty-second book in the Bible, "Song of Solomon," is a new adult novelty store positioning itself as a Christian source of intimacy products for married couples.

The store doesn't stock everything you'll find at a pansexual erotic bazaar. I got no results when I searched the catalog for "anal" or "prostate," although the Edibles section stocks four flavors and two sizes of Happy Penis Massage Cream. The emphasis is on products designed (or marketed) for couples to use together.

The owners remove pornographic packaging before they ship your order. They don't post "offensive" images on the website and they explain that they hope to help married folks nurture intimacy, God bless 'em.

You might assume that I have reservations about a store like Book22. After all, part of the point of a sex-positive boutique is to shop in the company of Jewish lesbians, black gay men and middle-aged, married WASP tourists. Setting yourself up as a Christian store for married couples could be interpreted as a way to discriminate against various sexual orientations or relationship arrangements.

And when I first read Cory Silverberg's blog post about the store, I did wrestle with some of the same questions he did, around inclusiveness and stigmas. For example, Book22's failure to carry anal toys could be a tacit message that anal penetration is inherently "bad" rather than a matter of personal preference and pleasure.

But you know what? After some thought, I find that I can't be too concerned. I learned at the Adult Novelty Expo that sex-toy stores are facing fierce competition, and not just because Sex and the City brought the rabbit pearl vibrator to the dinner table. (Or wait, maybe that was my fault.)

The internet makes products accessible to everyone; big-name stores siphon off potential customers from the smaller operations. When consumers can buy the same exotic vibrator from Amazon and Drugstore.com that they formerly had to order from your adult store, you find ways to tighten your garter belt and adopt new disciplines to keep your shop competitive.

We have plenty of places to buy adult products regardless of our relationship status or sexual orientation. A store like Book22 is not about segregation. It's not a movement, overt or subtle, to shut down other adult outlets.

Canada and America are home to a lot of married Christians. Book22 reaching out to these couples makes as much sense as Velvet Online (NSFW) reaching out to lesbians and JT's Stockroom (NSFW) reaching out to BDSM practitioners.

You could order from any of these stores – and none ask for proof of your sexual or marital status – but you probably gravitate toward certain sites. Some adult retailers have great customer review sections, some post calendars of events and workshops, some keep blogs or news feeds, some offer how-to articles. Ease of ordering, quality and selection of products and your personal feelings about the proprietors ultimately determine whether you'll shop at a particular place.

I think taking the devil out of cock rings and nipple jewelry is A Good Thing for America. Who would waste time legislating dildos out of Alabama when they could be taking reverse cowgirl to eleven with just $20 and a Jesus-approved marital aid?

Book22 might be the catalyst for more conservative types to stop viewing sexual accoutrements with so much suspicion and fear. Through the "permission" of Christian sex toys, they might realize that what they formerly thought of as deviant or alternate is actually as normal as using utensils to eat pizza. Not necessary to enjoying the task at hand, but a legitimate option nonetheless.

Might that more relaxed attitude filter out to other aspects of their lives? Might they stop worrying about what other people do in bed (on the floor, in the dungeon, etc.) and who they do it with? Might that not lead to a more harmonious, united population, over time?

If my musings sound familiar, they are. Last week I suggested that the internet turning me bisexual could lead to a more enlightened culture. This week, I'm hinting that a Christian sex shop could do the same thing. Change cannot come from just one direction.

My real question is whether Book22 can survive with its limited inventory. Will its customers be content with flavored lubes and bullet vibrators? Will they start demanding more exotic products – the kind sold in the other 98 percent of sex stores? Or will they start with Book22 and graduate to a bigger store within a year?

The sex-positive community works hard to spread messages of inclusion, tolerance and safety. So did Jesus, with his radical messages about loving one another and not casting the first stone. Book22 doesn't have anything for me – but then, neither does McDonald's. That doesn't mean it can't serve others just fine.