Turning my tragedy into hope

Menu

the post in which I ramble

It’s been forever. I had so many promising beginnings, so many on-the-cusp-of-genius posts and then a text popped up, a snack must be made, a floor needed to be swept. Urgent pleas to register for soccer filled up my inbox. Dance competitions and extra practices needed to be attended. A child wanted my computer, sometimes for homework, but mostly for minecraft. Speaking of minecraft, here is a must read for any parent whose children suffer from minecraft addiction. Good Lord, help us all.

I am working on book stuff, people. Book stuff! That means it’s so close. So close I can almost smell that new book smell. Hear the turn of the pages. I’ll have a sneak peek for you soon. My very first chapter of Fancy Feet, the book, coming your way!

I had great intentions of being around more, of writing more. Just a couple of months ago I made declarations of how I was back. Do you remember that post? It’s embarrassing now because I didn’t follow through. I meant to, I wanted to. What bothers me more is that I haven’t been to your spaces nearly enough; read your wise, soulful and funny words. Please don’t think I’ve forgotten or that I don’t care. I had no idea how consuming it would be to edit and edit and edit a manuscript or how weepy I would become after digging up my feelings surrounding the other driver or how exhausted I would be afterward when I was done, finally done, everything. When I read the email from my publisher that said “edits are accepted”, I joy-cried for 30 seconds and then, bleary-eyed, I binge-watched TV shows. I discovered Scandal. Scandal is super addictive. The Fitz and Olivia of it all, Defiance, the mole – I could not stop watching this show. In my TV fog, I had questions for my other shows like what is going on with Don Draper, the man with no redeeming values? Should I continue to watch The Killing? TV was a welcome distraction after being so in touch with my feelings for a very long time. What I’m trying to say is that I hadn’t counted on having to let some things go for a while because I can’t do it all.

It is almost the end of the school year and I feel the need to make a speech, thanking those around me who got me this far. To all the moms who understood and didn’t judge me or judged, but never to my face, when I forgot about a field trip or didn’t bring empty bottles, egg cartons or yogurt containers. To Scott for being the voice of un-crazy after I explained how I would be a total failure. To coffee for giving me a personality. To wine – cheers. To my friends who love me anyway. To Target where I can wander freely and aimlessly. To me for making lunches Monday to Friday from September to June…I am a marvel. To you guys, who have been here and are still here…thank you.

By the way, you can now subscribe to my blog by email. That’s for you, Julie Gardner!

Post navigation

8 thoughts on “the post in which I ramble”

Aaahhhhh, Heidi – so good to hear from you!
I read Heather’s post about minecraft as well and YES is all I can say to that.
Also – so good for you for taking a break. And just letting yourself float through those last months!
I’m super excited for your book! Can’t wait to hold it in my hands.
As for Target – it is my favourite store in the whole wide world and I have not been to Target Canada a single time. I LOVE Target USA and I’m afraid I’ll be disappointed… but I’m going to Kamloops on July 9th for an ortho appointment with my daughter (if your kids need braces – you are in for some serious fun. not.) and I will go to Target then. Wish me luck 🙂
GOOD TO HEAR FROM YOU!
(We should meet for coffee this summer. Really.)

I love your post. It didn’t read as rambling. Well, maybe a little, but it was very entertaining rambling. So excited about your book, a huge accomplishment. Everyone must be very proud of you, and you should definitely be proud of yourself.

OH MY GOSH – all I can say is HOORAY for this. For email subscriptions and boxes of books and for HOPE.
Hooray for you, my beautiful friend.

I’m so sorry I’ve been away at this MOST wonderful time for you – completely self-absorbed in our move out/in, in our packing and unpacking. I took a hiatus from the rest of the world but now I’m back and YOU are more fabulous than ever.

Congratulations on the launch of your first (see…I said FIRST) book. I am beyond thrilled for you and proud to know you. Can’t wait to read your amazing words…

Heidi Cave

Author of Fancy Feet:

In 1998 Heidi Cave was an active young woman looking forward to all the possibilities life had to offer. That all changed when her car was struck by a reckless driver going more than 100km/hr (60 mph), which resulted in a fight for her life.

Heidi had a choice to make; was she going to be a victim -- or a survivor? read more