... a miscellaneous hodgepodge of various thoughts, loosely held together by the fact that they're all emanating from a single mind. A lighthearted look at the world, a great place to waste a moment or two of your life.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Putt-Putt Cemeteries

DISCLAIMER: WARNING: the topic of this blog post may cause some distress in some readers; I caution you to consider the source of the material you're reading before getting upset and throwing something at me the next time we meet.

So, I was chatting with my dad the other day (as well as my mom, wife, and some of the kids), and we were discussing "burial" activities (generally, not specifics). My dad suggested that, when he goes, we should take his body to a taxidermist, have him stuffed, and place him in his chair, facing the TV. And occasionally put a video game controller in his hand when we're over playing Playstation or Wii.

After some various thoughts and laughter (some of which I just can't share here), we came up with a novel concept: instead of burying the dead, we should just stuff them and place them - standing, or in various poses - on top of the cemetery. That way, entire families could be "buried" together in the same space that would otherwise be occupied by a single grave. Also, it would allow people to see their deceased relatives in ways not previously possible.

Well, that brought this thought to mind: why not, instead of a cemetery, make it a putt-putt course, and use the stuffed deceased as the obstacles? "Around Aunt Martha's foot, over Uncle Henry's back, and off Cousin John's leg into the #4 hole." That would perhaps bring some merriment to what many consider a bleak time, and possibly make visiting the cemetery less of a distressing event, instead bringing whole families together to share a round of putt-putt.