Notable Quotes

You must keep sending work out; you must never let a manuscript do nothing but eat its head off in a drawer. You send that work out again and again, while you're working on another one. If you have talent, you will receive some measure of success - but only if you persist.--Isaac Asimov

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Sunday, August 21

Sympathy for my GF

Tomorrow is the first day of the school year. School supplies and clothes are ready. Normally, my gf would get to go to coffee for the first time in three months with no kids. This year, she will probably be spending it at home, taking care of our youngest who developed a fever today.

The school year doesn't affect me much because I work five am to one pm all year, Monday thru Friday. The majority of the time I am home, the kids are home anyway. But, I can feel her pain. We love our kids, really. We both just long for that little bit of time to be adults with adults. The only time we get to do this is during school. We don't get lucky enough for both our kids to spend the night with family on the same night and we can't afford a babysitter. One day won't make that much difference, but it is a letdown after all the anticipation.

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Saturday, August 20

Knit Some More

I need some R&R so out comes the knitting.

Right now, I'm starting a blanket with Lion Brand Chenile Thick 'n Quick. I haven't figured out the pattern yet. I'm trying to design a ripple afgan that is knit in the round. Flat, so that the ripples are along all the edges.

In other news, Megan is done. Didja hear that? D. O. N. E. It's gonna sit and stew before I even try to do an edit. Hence, the knitting reward.

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Tuesday, August 16

Knit-o-rama

Knitting has got to be one of the most zen experiences there is. Even more so if you make your yarn from scratch, but that is a whole other post. I've never found the same kind of experience with other fiber arts, but that's me.

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Friday, August 12

Umm

Hello, my name is Stupid.

Can someone please tell me what the heck "Trackback URL" is? My blog hopping enjoyment has been dampened by the fact that I don't know. Wierd, huh? I've been ignoring these little links for ages, but now I am obsessed. Grrrrrrr.

3 Comments:

This is about the best expanation I've come across. Basically, trackback lets other bloggers notify you when they refer to one of your posts. Blogger doesn't do trackback, which is why I started using Haloscan. Hope that helps.

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Wednesday, August 10

Compassion and Empathy

Let me tell you a story.

Do you know that the Ugly Duckling had a brother, Dark. He's never talked about, you see. Momma Swan sent Dark to school and taught him how to swim, just like Ugly. But, Dark didn't want to learn. Momma tried and tried.

Momma took Dark to the pond day after day, trying to get him to learn to swim. You see, it's a big pond out there and Momma didn't want Dark to drown. One day, Dark decided to do all the things Momma had always told him not to do. Momma had to let Dark face the pond on his own, whether to drown or to swim.

Momma and the other ducklings didn't see Dark for a long time. Momma swan was a beautiful and famous swimmer, that got even more famous while Dark was gone. She always worried about him, but she did have other ducklings to look after. She even helped other swans to swim as beautifully as she did. Then, they heard that he had done something really, really bad to two of the forest creatures. Momma and the other ducklings were crushed. The other forest creatures were outraged.

So, when this awful thing happened, the other forest creatures decided to pluck at Momma's feathers so that she would have a hard time swimming. Ponds were even closed. Some of the forest creatures realized that Momma didn't make Dark do these things. They thought that everyone should be helping those creature's families that got hurt instead. No one could hear them. Most of the forest creatures wanted to hurt somebody back.

The saddest part of this story is that this isn't the first duckling to not listen to its mother, and it won't be the last. Because Dark's momma was a beautiful and famous swimmer, all the forest creatures heard about it. I wonder if any of the forest creatures will realize that the families of those two creatures that got hurt need those that are plucking feathers to support them instead of waste their time plucking feathers.

Please pray for those involved, all of them. Annamarie Cruz Randazzo, her family, John Hardin, his family, Jeremy Chapman, his family, Joshua Henninger, and his family are all in my thoughts and prayers as they all should be in yours.

4 Comments:

This is a real-life tragedy. There are no heroes, only victims. Yes, there are people who did some evil things, but I hope there is some compassion in this world, even for them. They have to pay for what they did, but hatred is a cancer that destroys everyone is touches.

I don't pray in the sense that most people use the term, but my thoughts are turned that way, and I light candles for those who suffer. All of them.

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Saturday, August 6

Snip

-----Unedited Rewrite-----

The bumps from potholes rocked the bus, lulling me to sleep.

Dad stopped the boat, jumping overboard for a swim. Coming up for air, he said, "Shanna."

He was probably twenty feet from the boat. So, I dove in. The cool water caressed my skin as I swam to Dad. Each time I would look for him, he was farther away. Soon, my muscle's were screaming and the water was tossing me around. Now, when I looked, Dad was saying something.

"Dad, you're to far away. Stay there. I'll swim to you." The sky was so gray it looked black, lightning flashed. Through the greenish water, I could barely see him. Next time I looked, he was gone.

Startled, I opened my eyes.

"Stand up." The pits on the agent's face seemed deeper up close. Over his shoulder, Shanna could see angular gray lines that blocked the view of an amazing pink and purple sunset. Razor wire covered both sides of the three chain link fences surrounded this chunk of concrete that was supposed to be a building.

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Fears

PBW got me thinking about what I fear. I realized it isn't the rejection letters. I've dealt with rejection my whole life. It isn't pain, either. Been there, done that. I've already survived the most horrible experiences a sadist could think up. So what is it that I do fear?

I reflected on my life. I turned a full-ride academic scholarship at an Ivy League college into dropping out one semester short of a degree at the local community college. I became an ass wiper instead of a nurse. All along, I've wanted to write. Now, I get to the ending and rewrite the whole damn thing from scratch. Anyone see a pattern here?

26 years of not taking that final step to achieve. I always thought that ripping out an afghan on the last row to fix a flaw on the fifth was perfectionism. Wrongo, Heather baby. The thought of accomplishment makes me want to curl up into a ball, piss myself, and scream "Uncle."

I watched Coach Carter (awesome movie, btw) last night. I remembered the following lines today while pondering my wonderfully dysfunctional life. Perfect fit.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world.

There's nothing enlightening about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.-Marianne Williamson

2 Comments:

Me, too. I have learned that perfectionism is only an excuse. Once we finish something, we are saying it's the best we can do, at least right now. The thought that it's not absolutely perfect is terrifying. What will other people think? Everybody will laugh at our mistakes and not like us anymore. We won't be able to show our faces in public. We'll have to become hermits and just die. And on and on and on. It's a hard battle to fight. Just being aware of it is a major step in the right diection, though.