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First post here, i'm mainly just a lurker. Something that's been bothering me lately, I feel like life in general is just very repetitive. I do the same things on a daily basis, because it fits my schedule and I have to do it. Wake up, go to school, come home, play video games, go to bed. Rinse and repeat forever. It feels like this cycle will always exist no matter what. Video games is what makes my day enjoyable, but everything else is just a drag, if I could fast forward past those minutes I would.

I'm not really fond of talking to people because it feels like I haven't build a connection with them, I don't know how much sense that makes. I like to have meaningful conversation with people, but usually those conversations never happen. I know being part of introversion is liking to be alone but at the same time, I wish I could have those connections with people. Just to make the day less bland. Most of the time when im home, im in my room anyway, but I guess I have too much introversion? Its a clash between being a human and being a social creature and wanting to be just by myself most of the time.

I'm just confused, anyone in a similar position or know what I should do from here on out?

I seriously recommend you look into what Buddhists call Mindfulness. To put it short and blunt - you aren't enjoying things because you aren't paying attention to them.

Be aware the following may seem critical, but I do not wish to imply you are lazy or ungrateful. If I felt that I would not try to help you regain joie de vivre. I also do not wish to imply this is easy - long term mindfulness is HARD.

Where is your mind when you are getting up, brushing your teeth, showering, etc.? Probably on something besides the actions you are taking. This leads you to ignoring the importance/enjoyment of those actions and taking them for granted.

The next time you take a shower, be mindful of the shower - be aware that you are cleansing your body, the feel of running water, the fact that you have access to running water, the ability to pause for some number of minutes in your day to do something just for you.

The next time you eat - stop, and pay attention. Get your mind away from everything else besides eating. Be thankful for the people who brought the products. Be mindful of the fact that you have food. Be aware of the tastes, textures, and motions of eating. PAY ATTENTION.

The next time you go to school - stop, and pay attention. Be aware that the teacher worked hard to make these lessons digestible to you. Be aware of how each lesson will improve your life later on, or will build up to the next lesson. Be thankful that you have access to education. Recognize how school is a shared experience with your peers, giving you a way to meet, bond, and learn important social skills as well as academics. It's too easy to take these things for granted.

The next time you play video games or are just sitting there masturbating - stop, and pay attention. What is your goal right now? Do you have a life goal? Is this working toward it? Are you actually stressed? Do you really need to blank your mind right now? Or are you simply doing something out of habit?

Being mindful will not only allow you to reacquire a taste for the mundane, it will bring to light places in your routine that aren't necessary, and may actually be inhibiting your life goals. Or, if you've never thought about it, being mindful can help you discover what your life goals are.

Your schedule is something you can change, it is your schedule after all. You don't have to go home and play videogames after school. Videogames are simply an activity that you are comfortable with.

You want human interaction, but at the same time do not. Real human interaction is based on giving and taking. Forming relationships and friendships. You simply need practice, and need to know what kind of friend you're looking for.

After class hang out in the cafeteria and try to start conversations with people. Ask some random person to bum a cigarette, and try to strike up a conversation with them. If your school has a recreation room, then go there and get in on a game of pool or darts.

I have a problem with the shallowness of human interaction too. I really enjoy discussions like philosophy, psychology, religion etc, etc, but they seem to happen extremely rarely in normal situations. I can remember many times trying to bring up some kind of intelligent conversation topic and just been stared at awkwardly. It seems like an silly amount of 'work' is needed for a small amount of enjoyment every now and then. I mostly have reverted to communicating mostly on the internet, that way I can pick and choose the conversations I want to join. Long silences aren't weird, and people only talk when they actually have something to say. I get told it's not healthy, and I'm not sure if that's true or not but I haven't found a better alternative yet.

I have learned that intelligent conversations have to be worked for. You can't just go up to just anyone and ask about their deep beliefs and experiences without first establishing rapport. This is done by confirming common ground on other shallower subjects. Lead a conversation from small talk to deeper areas with baby steps. You have to realize other peoples interests and work with the information to segue into other areas. Everyone has different layers to unravel before they trust someone to accept their hidden minds. Some people will never open up while others jump at the chance. But whatever you do, don't press the flirt button until you have asked if they are single. I play Sims 3 a lot.

My high school experience was very similar. Got up, go to school, walked the exact same route every day from class to class, went home, surfed the web while doing homework, go to bed, and REPEAT the next day.

Discussion with others is very difficult for me because most of the time I feel excluded in the conversation because I couldn't seem to relate to what people were talking about. Many of the kids in my high school were into Anime and I couldn't have been less interested in that as a form of subject. Most of the time, I ended up sitting by myself at the ends of lunch tables. As I've grown older, it changes because now I don't engage unless it sparks an interest or the subject is one that I'm knowledgeable on. This isn't to say that I'm anti-social but it does significantly factor on the people itself. I'm generally more content with fellow peers I'm very close to or those I can strongly relate to on a personal level. Otherwise, I'm just another introvert.

Part of your day is going to be grinding you just have to keep an eye to the reward and notice things that please you. Selective perception is very important to happiness. I think you might also be confusing being an introvert with something else because that isolated feeling you are describing isn't a result of introversion and it belies a desire to not be so isolated. If you find time to talk to someone and you aren't building a connection I suspect it is because you are guarding yourself emotionally. This all comes from the perspective of someone who has been guilty of all of these things so I might be seeing what I am looking for and not what is there.

Get an after school job. Save up that money. Use said money when you graduate for either: Collage, or travel abroad. Keep track of the money you make, and practice being frugal with it. Make a plan of your choices and think about what you want out of the experience. What is your goal after collage/seeing the world?