Taking Care of Yourself

By Laura J. Warren, Texas Parent to Parent

I remember how often I lied when people kindly said, “You’re taking care of yourself, right? You know Jason depends on you and you have to take care of yourself for him!” My answer was always, “Sure!” but under my breath, it was “Yeah, right!” My son was a micro-preemie and after many ups and downs was coming home after almost six months in the hospital, I was pumping breast milk every 2 hours or at least was supposed to be, I was contracting out our dream home, and my husband and I were the finish contractors. Taking care of myself? In whose dreams?
Unfortunately, I found out the hard way what happens when I do not take care of myself – bouts of depression that can last 4 to 6 months and loss of myself – who I am, what I need, and what I want. Those kind people were right - I could not be there for Jason when I was not there for myself. It was finally when I no longer had the desire or energy to play with him, my sweet little boy who had worked so hard all those years to learn to walk and talk, and now, Mom could no longer have fun with him. I went for help.
I have read lots of “Care for the Caregiver” lists and articles and handed many out to parents in various groups I’ve facilitated. Now, I have had a little time to really read them and think about them and the following are my favorites:

Be gentle with yourself

Laugh and play

Identify the activities which are healing or fun for you and do one each day – it can be a quick as five minutes