Viewers shocked at close-up of Obama's blackheads

Washington DC - US President Barack Obama has shocked British TV viewers after revealing much of his face is pitted with blackheads.

Speaking to White House reporters during a meeting with UK Prime Minister David Cameron the President displayed a well-entrenched colony of facial zits that pepper his cheeks like little bugs on a flower.

A close-up of the presidential acne sparked torrents of complaints from UK viewers demanding to know why the Commander-in-Chief of the Free World hasn't been given 'a damn good facial' by his wife Michelle.

Or whatever White House minion is normally assigned to the task.

A similar occurrence in 2002 saw horrified London audiences reel with horror as a one inch long nasal hair sprouting from President George W Bush's blush-red hooter was seen quivering when Dubya addressed the American nation on TV.

Dubya's facial zoom shot was subsequently much parodied by UK comics who compared the hair to a bit of alien antenna that receives remote control signals from the Pentagon each time the President strays from an agreed agenda.

This week's Obama close-ups are bound to reignite that particular conspiracy theory agenda amid calls for Barack to be Vulcan mind-melded by FBI X-Files agents to check for some sort of a voodoo zit spell.

A one hour laser session at a reputable skin clinic could easily zap those pesky blackheads in one fell swoop.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

Following a tireless debate last night, congress has begun work drafting a new bill that seeks to stop white men from kicking the back of a goddamn coon's head and shattering his teeth whilst proclaiming the sanctity of the white bloodline.
The bi...

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a stunning development, Chief Justice John Roberts changed his name to Caitlyn Roberts, thereby joining Justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan as custodians of keys to the women's restroom of the Supreme C...

Washington - The President of the United Snakes of America and a Brit Reality TV con artist famous for faking the Beeb's wildlife documentaries have appeared in a televised White House junk science rant.
Barack Obama and ageing UK naturalist (sic...

Washington, DC - Disgraced NAACP leader, Rachel Dolezal, who was fired last month for being a secret whitey, didn't take long to get her life heading in a newish direction. It turns out that she quickly found an equally-minded friend in John Boehner,...

Washington, D.C - How do you cap off a Democratic Presidency that seems to have gotten almost nothing done for nearly eight long years? Well, a good way to start is to gather all the whack job liberals you can find after a really gruesome, racially m...

Malone, NY - New York Police shot and killed one of the two escaped murderers from the Clinton Correctional Facility, Richard Matt, on Friday, only a few miles from the Canadian border - which would have surely been the end of the trail for all polic...

No longer willing to ignore the stark reality of environmental degradation, global poverty, and deteriorating human health, pessimistic beverage packing company Canned Dreams, Inc., recently announced the launch of a new product line, known as the al...

In a clever political maneuver all 32 republican presidential prospects agreed to consolidate their collective power and run as one single multi-personality candidate.
The new strategy is the brainchild of Carl Rove who said it was necessary to a...