The sensible person would interpret this to mean that Tommy Hilfiger doesn't wash his jeans ever because Tommy Hilfiger has people to wash his jeans for him. But oh no no, that sensible conclusion is not at all the correct one to draw: Tommy Hilfiger doesn't wash his jeans ever, nor does anyone in the employ of Tommy Hilfiger. Tommy Hilfiger simply waltzes around our great green Earth in filthy dungarees.

We'll publish the results in this week's Squalor and then we'll talk all about caring for denim. Leave topical questions, favorite tricks, love notes, etc. in the comments and I'll do my best to incorporate them into this most important discussion.