So here’s what I thought were some everyday, normal pictures of Robin Williams giving you body and pepaw chichis while snorkeling in Hawaii on New Year’s Day. I stared at these pictures for way too long, because there was something off to me. I couldn’t put my finger on it until I realized…..

When Robin Williams rips his top off, I expect to see more hair than what’s in Beyonce’s weave closet. I expect to see a soft, thick bear rug that makes me want to take off my clothes, put on some Barry White and roll around on it. I see that some of it has turned Santa Claus white, but where’s the rest? There’s no way Robin waxed or shaved it off. That’s impossible! As soon as wax pulls one of Robin’s hairs off, another hair immediately grows in its place and its thicker and sturdier then ever before. When a dude (or a Kardashian) reaches the Metamucil phase of life, does his chest fur fall off? Is that going to happen to Simon Cowell? I would Google “Tom Selleck’s chest today,” but I don’t think I can take it if his glorious chest fur shed off.

Everyone always says that Robin Williams is so hairy that when he fucks a chick her pussy coughs up hairballs for days and his b-hole probably looks like a Woolly Bear Caterpillar napping on a dried apricot slice. So what I’m wondering is, do you think his ass hair fell off too? Whatever, I’d still hit it, even if he has a bald ass.

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