The Man Watchers Credo: Here's Looking At You, Kid

July 9, 1986|By Moira Bailey of the Sentinel Staff

Today marks the midpoint of the Fourth Annual Man Watchers Compliment Week: a You're Looking Good from Here kind of happening established because men need ego boosts and they don't get enough of them. In our society, women have not been allowed or encouraged to compliment members of the opposite sex.

So says Suzy Mallery, the 47-year-old founder of Man Watchers Inc., an organization designed to promote loving your fellow man. Any man.

The group was founded 10 years ago, and since then has amassed a membership of 10,000.

For about $15, a woman can join and receive a Man Watchers official kit, which includes a membership card and three varieties of compliment cards that are wallet-size, and extremely user-friendly.

The flip side of a Well Worth Watching Card, for example, provides a list of compliment-able qualities -- masculine, debonair, charming, intriguing, foxy -- the giver can check off and hand over to a man.

And there's a bonus for the watcher.

''I think it's a way for a woman in a nice and socially acceptable manner to go after what she wants,'' said Mallery, proving the old Flattery Will Get You Everywhere principle is alive and well in the back pockets of men across the United States and Canada. Heck, Johnny Carson has got one of these cards. Hi-yo.

The cards are not intended as come-ons, says Mallery. If the man is with a woman, for instance, Man Watchers counsels to ''address her first and say you'd like to compliment her on having such a watchable husband. Then proceed with the presentation. Most women are pleased about it.'' Mallery used to hand them out at parties when she was married. She has since divorced and remarried -- to a man she gave a card to at a party.

Never mind the fact that the company distributing the Man Watchers kits handles male beefcake calendars. There are some serious reasons for what Man Watchers does.

The Man Watcher Theory of Complimentary Evolution: Men are hungry for compliments. They are scared of rejection. They are pampered as little boys -- more so than little girls. But when they grow up to be men, society pats them on the back only when they have become rich, famous or successful. Go ahead, compliment them. They will act embarrassed, but they will soak up the compliments like a sponge.

There are Man Watcher Kleenex-Wringer stories such as the one Mallery tells about the chubby man with a twinkle in his eye and the ''neatest smile.'' Mallery gave him a card. He cried.

The Man Watchers duties extend far beyond their immediate ranks. The group has become the unofficial gauge of this country's most watchable men. This year's vote went to Dynasty's John Forsythe, who Mallery says is destined for the Man Watchers Hall of Fame.

Man Watchers week is typically full of excitement. This year, on Tuesday, members were asked to call six men they knew and tell them why they liked them. On Thursday, compliments can extend to family members. Friday and Saturday are compliment wild-card days.

But hey, today -- Man Watchers take note -- is Ladies' Day. Members are urged to compliment other women. In complimenting women, Mallery says, don't just tell them they look nice.

Mention brains, she says. Kindness. They will soak it up like a sponge.