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Let’s just jump right to the video clip. Because it needs no introduction, it is just so wrong:

The speaker is Polly Tommey. Polly Tommey has a long history of bad autism advocacy. When people think of the autism parents who just do advocacy wrong, they are thinking of people like Polly Tommey. She’s been a voice in the “vaccines-cause-autism” movement for a long time. She’s worked with Andrew Wakefield (whose unethical actions in relation to disabled patients at his hospital lost him his medical license. To name one of his many failures). This in itself demonstrates bad judgement and poor reasoning. Recall that Andrew Wakfield fictionalized an account of a parent murdering her autistic child, framing it as an act of love.

But the low point of Polly Tommey’s advocacy career came when she and Andrew Wakefield “helped” a family in crisis. They were working on a reality TV show (that failed to get off the ground) called the Autism Team. The idea was simple: find a family with an autistic child who is in need of help. Swoop in with Team Wakefield, blame vaccines, claim it’s all about gastrointestinal issues, claim to have helped the family and move on to the next. But it all fell apart with one family–that of Alex Spourdalakis. In the autism community, a community were people have extraordinary needs, Alex had extraordinary needs. What he didn’t need was for his mother to be fed false hopes and bad advice, which is what Team Wakefield did. What he didn’t need was for Team Wakefield to walk away to their next project, leaving his mother with nothing when the hope they were sold proved false.

Alex was murdered. Brutally murdered. By his mother and another caregiver. Alex was poisoned. When that failed to kill him, he was stabbed. Repeatedly. His wrist was slit to the bone. By his mother and caregiver. Alex bled to death, leaving a grisly scene for when his father, estranged from the mother, found him.

The fact that Polly Tommey won’t face up to her abject failure with Alex Spourdalakis is not surprising. It is also not surprising that Polly Tommey won’t judge the people who committed that brutal murder, or any other murder by a parent of an autistic child. Not surprising, but an example of the failure of Polly Tommey and other faux autism advocates to actually stand up and lead. How hard is it to say, “No! Murder is wrong”?

Polly Tommey met Alex Spourdalakis. But she “won’t judge” the person who plunged a knife into his chest. She won’t judge the person who poisoned him. She won’t judge the person who slit his wrist.

Katie’s family (not counting her mother) loved her. She was valued. Her father stated, “If the measure of a person’s life could be quantified by the number of people that loved them, then Katie, in her brief 3 1/2 years, achieved well beyond all of us.”

He loved hats. More importantly, he was loved. Valued. His father is quoted as saying that London was his whole world. That he will miss London forever.

London McCabe’s mother took him to a bridge and pushed him over the rail. He fell over 100 feet, landing in a river. He not only had the fall to know that his own mother had pushed him over, he survived the fall, suffering multiple broken bones. He died from drowning. London McCabe suffered. He suffered fear. He suffered pain. He suffered betrayal. His mother had planned the murder, researched how to get off with an insanity defense (which thankfully failed).

When you say, “I won’t judge”, you are saying, “autistics have such hard lives that killing them can be justified in some cases”. You were probably thinking of people like Alex, whose challenges were great. But you were wrong. Alex deserved his chance. He deserved his life. But even in your twisted logic, why can’t you bring yourself to judge Katie’s mother? London’s mother?

You and your new friend Del Bigtree are trying to make a name for yourselves with all your talk of freedom we Americans value so strongly. Let me remind you of the Declaration of Independence.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness

All men are created equal. And the first of the “unalienable rights” is life.

Alex Spourdalakis was created equal. He had a right to life.

Katie McCarron was created equal. She had a right to life.

London McCabe was created equal. He had a right to life.

All people with disabilities are created equal. All have a right to life. A many are murdered. Why don’t you stand with them? Why do you stand with those who murder?

The phrase “parental rights” doesn’t exist in the Constitution. As a parent I am not endowed with the right to chose life or death for my child. Until you understand that, all your “freedom” rhetoric is, frankly, just a bullshit public relations effort.

When you refuse to judge, you enable. You make it just that little bit easier for parents and other caregivers to murder.

My kid faces an uncertain future. A future where abuse and murder are real possibilities. My kid needs advocates who will stand up for him and his rights. If I do wrong by my son, damned right someone should judge me. Because if we refuse to judge parents, we say it’s acceptable to commit murder. It’s acceptable to treat autistics as less valuable, less human, less deserving of basic human rights.

It is perfectly acceptable, even important, to judge others when they fail. Ms. Tommey, in case it isn’t clear, I’m judging you right now.

So far, you have pointed to nothing incorrect in the post above, and have provided vitriol rather than facts. And again, you have completely ignored the topic at hand, which is the murder of autistic children by their parents and the implied support of it.

This broke my heart to read but it needed to be said. This was so well written and such a powerful message. Thank you so much for using the power of your words to talk about the real victims in all of this. Polly Tommey, the autistic community certainly judges you, your twisted dismissive and silencing views and your poor excuse for a charity.

This is a terrible tragedy. However, reading this you would think that Polly killed the child. It seems both hateful and childish to blame Polly to me. Let’s promote autism acceptance and help families rather than being hateful.

It is sad that Carey has got this SO SO wrong about one of the most loving, caring individuals on this planet. Polly is a mother with a vaccine injured son, later diagnosed with autism and has lived a life full of the most difficult challenges associated with raising a child with autism. I doubt Carey has lived one day rasing a child with special needs so it does not seem appropriate or relevant that he attacks Polly with his malicious lies and false associations.
As a mother Polly has spoken openly to thousands of parents like her faced with the many challenges associated with autism and has publically spoken about her own experiences and has shared the many stories experiencedby fellow parents in her position. Parents are concerned about their children’s futures as facilities and services are already limited for the majority and again she has plans to build futures with purpose for individuals and their families living with autism. She also founded the brilliant magazine autism file and this has become a lifeline to so many parents who are searching for support. Carey you do not know Polly, you have misrepresented her in this article and again have tried to present her to your audience as a person that she certainly is not and will never be.
I know this person and understand this person better than anyone else on this planet and yet again you aim to distort the truth rather than speak it.

Do you also support the view that parents who murder their autistic children should not be judged (and by implication, the murders not condemned)? Or are you claiming Ms. Tommey did not make that statement?

Do you also support the view that parents who murder their autistic children should not be judged (and by implication, the murders not condemned)? Or are you claiming Ms. Tommey did not make that statement?

Interesting how those defending Ms. Tommey refuse to address this point. Or even acknowledge that is the core of the article above.

Suggests that they realize how problematic the statement is. Either they don’t want to be on record disagreeing with Ms. Tommey, or they don’t want to be on record agreeing with her.

So instead of showing some courage (either statement would take courage they apparently lack), they use this as a platform to attack Fiona O’Leary.

Pushing parents into the arms of the vaccines-cause-autism community – with its guilt, anger and bitterness and its vulnerability to sham biomed treatments – isn’t helping them. Quite the opposite. Speaking up repeatedly in that way isn’t really to Ms. Tommey’s credit.

I doubt Carey has lived one day rasing a child with special needs so it does not seem appropriate or relevant that he attacks Polly with his malicious lies and false associations.

How pathetic of you to even attempt to deride Matt about “not knowing Polly Tommey”, when you couldn’t be arsed to find out who Matt Carey is. We all know who Polly Tommey is and she exploits her son for her own notoriety. A son she is supposed to protect and respect his right to privacy and dignity as a human being. If anything Matt was restrained; I won’t be. She is a vile parasite feeding off the desperation of parents.

Yes, it is understandable that many don’t agree with her stance on vaccinations. However, the hateful smear campaign, based on no evidence whatsoever, from Fiona O’leary and her cronies, is despicable. They are a pack of hateful witches with no regard for anyone but themselves.

It has nothing to do with your desire to attack Ms. O’Leary. It’s focusing on the murdered children, and your behavior here seems to completely ignore them.

Frankly, using this as a platform for an unrelated personal attack, ignoring the serious issue, not saying one word that suggests you care that children were murdered by the parents, reflects on you. Not in any way on Ms. O’Leary.

The “Smear campaign” is directed at Fiona O’Leary due to her dedicated work in exposing the exploitation and demonisation of Autistic children by self serving vaccine causation conspiracists who push families into the charlatans world of the lucrative Biomedical industry. One who refuses the condemn murder of children, one who pushes an agenda of fear to drive parents away for the safety of proven interventions and into the arm of experimental quackery deserves no respect. You who are blindly or intentionally missing these facts are also to blame.

Yes, it is understandable that many don’t agree with her stance on vaccinations. However, the hateful smear campaign, based on no evidence whatsoever, from Fiona O’leary and her cronies, is despicable. They are a pack of hateful witches with no regard for anyone but themselves.

If you read the article properly, reissd, you would realise that it unfairly suggests that Polly is a contributing factor in the death of Katie. The article and the proceeding comments are vitriolic, not mine. There is no evidence to suggest that Polly is in any way responsible, so the article and many of these comments, are very unfair, and unkind. My statements about Fiona are purely evidence based. Why don’t you do some of your own research ?

The above so called ‘article’ on the Polly woman has the stamp and style of Fiona O’Leary all over it. O’Leary has honed in on this woman as she runs a successful Autism Charity in the UK. Unable to get the mainstream media to print her vitriol she only has online sites such as this one to pedal her wares to where some bloggers will allow her a platform for click bait and to drive traffic to otherwise obscure sites. Move along people nothing to see here that you haven’t already seen from the O’Leary state circus (state being the operative word here) Fiona and I used to be close until she killed me! Stabbed in the back while I was lying in the arms of Mary. Now the lights shine down the valley no more.

Wanting to believe every criticism of Ms. Tommey is from Fiona O’Leary doesn’t make it so – and doesn’t negate the criticism.

You have pointed to nothing inaccurate in the article. The only link to Katie’s death is that Ms. Tommey promotes the debunked notion that vaccines cause autism. Do you deny that? Because there’s plenty of evidence of it.

Nothing defamatory in the article. Truthful criticism is not defamation. If Ms. Tommey doesn’t like the criticism of her actions, maybe she should act differently.

Coming onto this article and unloading a pile of content-empty invective on Ms. O’Leary doesn’t negate the criticism aimed at Ms. Tommey’s behavior.

And still, you have said nothing to criticize the murder of these children.

“If you read the article properly, reissd, you would realise that it unfairly suggests that Polly is a contributing factor in the death of Katie. If you read the article properly, reissd, you would realise that it unfairly suggests that Polly is a contributing factor in the death of Katie. ”

I don’t know your definition of “properly”. So I’ll suggest to you: read for accuracy. Here is the sentence you seem focused upon:

Just an ad hominem argument Jonathon. Picking apart the human rather than what she is advocating. Its a good sign though, that Matt is taking the time to write this crap. He must be getting desperate. First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

This blog has been up since 2003. Almost all of that time countering the damaging misinformation. Hardly ignoring. Not fighting, but countering. And, how long exactly is this “we will win” supposed to take you guys?

Perhaps if you had an accurate message you could/would win. But spreading the same misinformation year after year doesn’t “win” (what is this, anyway, a game to you guys?)

I don’t laugh at Andrew Wakefield, Polly Tommey and the like. They are causing far to much damage to be funny.

By the way–a recent email was sent out by Dan Olmsted claiming to be the longest running autism source…aside from many others I can think of, 2003 is years before AoA went online.

Calm down everyone. Nobody should kill anyone- everyone should love one another and not judge one another- I think ultimately we are all on the same page. Protect, love and help people with autism live a safe, happy life with purpose and respect as we all deserve. Unity is key

I’m afraid it doesn’t work in this case. I agree the goal is to protect people with autism. Not judging parents who murder their autistic children does the opposite, encourages – or at least doesn’t deter – the next murderer. It’s also a direct wrong against the victim.

Those seeking to protect children with autism must say clearly and loudly: murdering a child with autism is wrong. Inexcusable. Unforgivable. A crime and betrayal of trust.

Prof Reiss, correct me if I am wrong here, but this also seems to go against the dramatic rhetoric that the Vaxxed team uses. Del Bigtree can’t seem to give a public performance without saying “this is the United States of America.”

One thing that defines the United States of America, one thing our founders fought for and made damned sure would be codified in our constitution, was the jury trial. Which in essence means that we as Americans can and will judge our citizens. That guilt is determined by citizen peers.

Polly says “Nobody should kill anyone”, but above she is on record saying she won’t judge a parent who kills their autistic child. Which is it, Polly?

“Everyone should love one another” is a platitude that may fool the thousands of parents you have spoken to, but it’s not an ethical stance. Some people should be judged, and that includes murderers. Please read this story and tell me if you feel a sense of judgement against the son.

If you do, and I think you should, perhaps you might examine why you are prepared to lack this sense of judgement when the victim is a child, and not an adult. Perhaps it is because you identify with the parent of an autistic child, but not with the son of a disabled mother?

“Polly says “Nobody should kill anyone”, but above she is on record saying she won’t judge a parent who kills their autistic child.”

Exactly. Why didn’t she say, “Parents are killing their children. Nobody should kill anyone.” Full stop.?

If you can’t bring yourself to judge someone, you don’t have to tell everyone “I for one will not judge them”. All that does is lower the bar for people contemplating murder. While portraying the speaker as somehow morally righteous for refusing to judge.

Which, of course, is hypocritical in this case. Ms. Tommey has spent much of her advocacy, and certainly her effort with Vaxxed, judging people. She will judge researchers at the CDC (using misinformation) but not people who murder autistic children.

Then why didn’t you say as much in the video (or, if you did, that was not the take-home message)?
You know what is about unity? Herd immunity. (Heck, it’s got “unity” in the name.) But you seem perfectly comfortable spreading misinformation about vaccines so that herd immunity gets eroded to the point where children get hurt.

Can you imagine if that becomes some sort of a legal standard or viable criminal defense? “Your honor, the child had it coming. They were a tragedy, a burden, gone since the day they received their vaccines.” People like Polly need to think twice about wanting to live in that kind of a world.

Calm down everyone. Nobody should kill anyone- everyone should love one another and not judge one another- I think ultimately we are all on the same page. Protect, love and help people with autism live a safe, happy life with purpose and respect as we all deserve. Unity is key

Why calm down Polly? Is some richly-deserved vitriol being hurled your way? What a weasel you are to declare we shouldn’t judge one another; I’ll bet that only applies when the judgement of you is being done. We all judge and pretending you won’t judge murderous parents demonstrates what a nasty, vile bint you are. We have all seen how you and your daughter Bella shamelessly exploit your son; your decision to do so is judgement, piss poor judgement though. You, Wakefield, Bigtree and your ilk are on the fringe of autism advocacy and you will remain there because of the damage you cause.

“Calm down” is often used in debates to portray the opposing side as acting irrationally, and to portray the speaker as being in a commanding position.

However, I do wonder if Ms. Tommey would agree that her supporters are not calm and are, in fact, stalking Fiona O’Leary. I would admit that this would be more difficult to see now that I have removed some of the worst comments from her supporters.

you are trying to avoid facing head on the points made above–why will you not judge those who murder autistics?

You have made it your job to judge others. Vaxxed is nothing if not judging (based on misinformation) others. Your video where you claim the CDC are running a new Tuskegee experiment and that CDC researchers are worse than Hitler, Pol Pot and Stalin is an extreme example of harsh judgment. So your moral high ground is lost.

You chose where to judge. And you chose to not judge those who murder our own.

I made the above difficult to read, and I did it calmly and for a purpose. This isn’t some antiseptic intellectual discussion. This is a discussion of people who end the lives of those we love, and often end them brutally.

Katie McCarron suffered. Her mother suffocated her with a plastic bag. Katie had a long time to fight for her life, and to know that she was betrayed by her mother.

I am 100% comfortable judging that mother.

If I could go back in time to before Katie died, go back and give a talk before an audience where Katie’s mother was in attendance, I would make damned sure I made it clear that murder is wrong.

Murder is wrong. That’s a judgment. Murderers have done wrong. That’s a judgment. And there is zero wrong with that. There is no moral high ground in refusing to do that. Quite the opposite.

“I think ultimately we are all on the same page. Protect, love and help people with autism live a safe, happy life with purpose and respect as we all deserve.”

Refusing to speak out against those who murder autistics is not protecting them. It is, in fact, the opposite. By publicly stating that parents who murder will not be judged, you lower the bar for those entertaining that horrific thought.

So, no, we are not on the same page. You are wishing for something to happen (as you are doing) while your actions run exactly counter to that goal.

I’ll take actions over wishes.

Unity is key

And you will be welcomed when you decided to join the autism community and leave the vaccine antagonistic community to a secondary role in your life.

Andrew Wakefield has been romanticizing the murder of disabled children for years. Somehow, in his twisted reality, he manages to describe the act of murdering Mark Young, an autistic 11 year old, as “keeping him safe” (from his nauseating book published in 2010).

Lets get this right…You just said “Andrew Wakefield has been romanticizing the murder of disabled children for years” Having said that, taken the liberty of your own words and setting up a strawman you go on. You know, you are not doing yourself any favours in saying your piece that most resonable people will listen to, when you begin this way. If you have an issue, just say it and stop blaming Wakefield. Who says Matt is right. Matt will be the first person to say he is open to being wrong. Are you?

He gives a fictionalized account of a mother jumping with her son to their deaths–murdering the child and committing suicide at the same time. Here is the final sentence

She was ready. Falling ever faster, she pulled him to her, love and instinct keeping him safe.

How is murdering one’s child “instinct”, “love” or “keeping him safe”?

It isn’t. Parents are always right in Wakefield’s mind (except the majority of us who disagree with him, but he denies that fact). So much is his “the parents are always right” message that he supports them in murder.

I don’t believe in judging other humans for their sins or wrongdoings because that makes me equal to them. What I will choose to do is fight for the rights of those I love and those who need our voices. Instead of allowing myself to judge in anger, I will rally against stupidly and bigotry. I won’t allow anger to turn me into somebody who personifies the evil that lives in this world. I’ll leave that for the people who choose to lie and mislead families onto dangerous paths filled with the myths and horrible science that is put out there so somebody else can feel less accountable for something they had nothing to do with in the first place; cause autism. Oh, there will be accountability and judgement and it will not come at my hand. I choose to let my children with autism know that they are perfect just the way they are and that the hurdles they have overcome may still be there ready to try and take them down, but they are stronger and loved so much that they aren’t fighting alone! I can’t imagine how much strength it takes to battle along the spectrum, the trials are all so different. It can’t be cured though, it’s not a disease that has a treatment or pill to fix it. But, it is a beautiful way to teach love. I’ve seen so many miracles along the way, none greater than the love that autism teaches. Patience is taught. Giving is taught. Sacrifice is taught. We, as non-autistics, are so special, so special that the love and gifts we receive by having these amazing people in our lives can’t be measured! If you are struggling and need help then please reach out to the community of love that is so much larger that the community of confusion and hurt. Love your special someone, I promise they love you.

I believe there is a correlation between vaccines and autism. However, the more I focus on this correlation the more I realise that the world is full of autistic kids – the oldest perhaps 20-25 and realise that, if, and that’s a big if considering the responses and passion of people like Matt who run this site for example, this is true then when we admit there is a problem, funding, support and education will flow like rivers to autistic people. If and if I am wrong and there is no correlation between vaccine and autism then funding, support and education should flow like rivers to autistic people because, at a climbing rate in our society currently at 68:1 (CDC) the world in front of us will be 1 autistic, 1 carer. We must learn about autism as quickly as we can so those that have it dont suffer and become productive members of our society and dont just stay home.

For years, Wakefield has accumulated this flock of parrots – everyone from the troll Stone, to Miller, Hewitson, Thrower and $tott – and Polly is now parrot in chief. Basically, he had an affair with her, got control of her magazine, which enabled him to get to the mothers he feeds on, making them think he was innocent of the GMC’s charges. And she then had a choice as to what to do next.

If you compare what she says in your video clip, and what he says in the video clip I’ve posted, I think you’ll get the picture of Pretty Polly Parrot.

I’m not sure that she’s ever come up with the kind of hard cash and green card stuff that Liz Birt got him before she died, but she’s certainly played her part to try rescue him from the oblivion he deserves.

If she says she doesn’t know of the quite extraordinary misconduct which has been proven against him, she certainly, as the civil law would say, ought to know.

Thank you, Matt. This is London’s father. Thank you for saying that he deserved to live. He did. What happened should not have happened. It did. People hurt other people without thinking of the consequences. That’s why I don’t read or watch news anymore. It hurts too much. God bless and defend all of you.

I don’t know how autistic your son is but I’ve certainly seen some very severely autistic kids whose behaviour is utterly indescribable. I can’t imagine the stress that the parents and siblings of such severely disabled kids go through. It is not surprising that after years of very severe problems living with such children, some people end up in such a tortured mental state that they are capable of committing such horrific crimes. You may be able to cope with your child but you don’t seem to have any empathy whatsoever for those who just can’t cope with theirs. You’re also, clearly, happy to make political capital out of such tragedies which I personally find reprehensible.

The fault for these tragedies lies fair and square with the medical profession and their enablers, the pharmaceutical industry. I am sure that they know precisely what is happening to these children who, as babies, are injected with toxic substances designed to force their immature immune systems to respond in ways they were never designed to. There are no safety studies on the advisedness of giving multiple vaccines to such young babies. Those who are doing so are murderers. All you need to do is look at VAERS to see the results. Hint: You need to multiply the deaths by a factor of 10 or 100.

What an ignorant statement. It’s not like people are “10% autistic” or “90%” autistic.

I’ve had people–like you–downplay my observations for over a decade with the “your kid isn’t autistic enough” bullshit.

Funny how you, a person who appears to not have an autistic child, is lecturing me on what it means to be the parent of an autistic child. So put your “personally find reprehensible” comments away, you hypocrite. Anti-vaccine activists like you, spreading lies, are the bane of our community. You willingly use and abuse the autism community to promote your agenda. Who cares if you leave parents feeling despair and guilt? Who cares

Who cares? Well, you don’t. That’s for sure. You got your message onto another platform on the internet. So what if there’s collatoral damage along the way?

And–apologizing for people who murder and abuse disabled people? Go to hell, sir.

Apologies for necro-ing this thread but I just had to say ‘well said’ Matt.

Raising an autistic child is an incredibly challenging task (not that raising an NT child is a cakewalk!) and I have great empathy for those who do it (including my own parents – I cringe at the memories of what they had to go through and they didn’t even have the minuscule comfort of even knowing that I was autistic!) and I can totally understand any who make the hard choice to give the child up if they can’t cope (as Dorit suggests in her comment).

But my understanding and sympathy flat out stops at the point where they decide to murder the child instead.

[…] may or may not go unpunished, but there is a much greater and more insidious tendency for people to sympathize with the parents who committed murder than the innocent lives that were snuffed out by the very people who should […]

[…] of moral fiber by refusing to face head on the criticism levied against her in a different post (Polly Tommey won’t judge parents who murder their disabled children. That’s part of the problem). She defends herself with the statement, “I had a clip of me that made it look like I […]

[…] Q&As, Bigtree and Tommey have been saying some pretty outrageous things. Tommey, for instance, said that she won’t judge parents who kill their autistic children, while Bigtree has frequently compared […]

[…] One of the things that trouble Ms. O’Leary about the endeavors of the vaccines-cause-autism community generally and the Vaxxed team specifically is that they present autistics in what some perceive as the worse light possible, in a way that dehumanizes them, reinforces stigma, and can lead to negative consequences from discrimination to, a…. […]

[…] here may recall this recent article: Polly Tommey won’t judge parents who murder their disabled children. That’s part of the problem. We discussed this video where Polly Tommey tells us about how she won’t judge parents who […]

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