Hide or Face?

Sincere thank you to all you guys who's helping me right now. But I think I am confused.

It's because someone tell me to face it but others tell me hide!

This is brief explanation of my current situation.

I have several credit card debits. Some of them are huge(Over 20K or 30K). I've been paying minimum payment for many years and decided to stop paying them. So I did stop paying them from last May.
I have a descent job, I have some savings from 401K but they are garnishing significant amount of money for child support directly from my pay check.

Anyway, Once I stopped paying them, I've decided to follow this validation tactics.

---FACE
For those credit card account with large debit, I am planning to give them some hard time and settle for 30% of what I owe them. If everything goes smooth as I planned I will be very happy.

But like some of you know, I got a letter from a collection attorney who threatened me to sue.
I don't want to get sued! because I know that they are all my OWN debit and not much ground to dispute at the court.

I realized that if I follow this validation tactic then I risk law suits. I think this is one negative side of this tactic.

However, by asking validation, spending some time to age the debit and making settlement (deletion in return) I hope I can quickly come back to normal life.

--- HIDE
Someone tell me to just vanish. and not talk to them. If I vanish, they can't sue me. So I am safe from law suit. However, I have to wait for full 4 years of SOL (california) to mature. During that 4 years, I have to live in dark with no credit or whatsoever. (By the way, while I am in this "underwater mode" can I still contact CRAs to repair my credit record?)

So, I am confused.
Looks like both strategy has it's own good and bad side.

The person who told you that if you can't be found you can be sued is wrong. All states have alternative service if they can't find you. That can be service by publication. They just put a notice in the newspaper.

Wow! 20 to 30K in debt AND child support garnishment. Please tell me this is all resulting from a divorce so I can have some sympathy for you.

Anyway, my recommendation is FACE. Let's say you hide. If I were a CA (which I'm not), for 20 to 30K, I'd sue your butt. If I can't find you, so what. I still can get a judgment against you. I did my best to try and serve you. SOL has no bearing on the matter. If you ever turn up again, I'd nail you. I'd keep renewing the judgments. So if you want to hide, take yourself out of the country and never come back. That's the hide scenario, unless you can obtain a different id...I'm not going there.

I'd call all the creditors, explain the facts of life to them, whether they be nasty or not. It serves them no purpose to sue you if they can't collect anywho. Make the best arrangements you can, get it all in writing, and sacrifice a little (or a lot) and pay them what you can. Something is better than nothing.

Originally posted by RichC Wow! 20 to 30K in debt AND child support garnishment. Please tell me this is all resulting from a divorce so I can have some sympathy for you.

Anyway, my recommendation is FACE. Let's say you hide. If I were a CA (which I'm not), for 20 to 30K, I'd sue your butt. If I can't find you, so what. I still can get a judgment against you. I did my best to try and serve you. SOL has no bearing on the matter. If you ever turn up again, I'd nail you. I'd keep renewing the judgments. So if you want to hide, take yourself out of the country and never come back. That's the hide scenario, unless you can obtain a different id...I'm not going there.

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Yeah, Divorce, Education... I did paying minimum payment and using balance transfer check for over 5 years and now I am here.

Yeah, in fact I am not a US citizen so in worst case I can just leave here. I guess I can use this when I ask them comeup with better settlement. Is this a good or bad idea?

Absolutely. Remember, all they want is money. It they can't get it, they'll move on to greener pastures. So if you tell them you may just have to leave the country, I suspect they'll try to work with you to at least get something. Work on getting the amounts reduced as much as possible. Make sure to include in the agreement that no negative postings will be made by them onto you credit report.

Originally posted by cashback Yeah, Divorce, Education... I did paying minimum payment and using balance transfer check for over 5 years and now I am here.

Yeah, in fact I am not a US citizen so in worst case I can just leave here. I guess I can use this when I ask them comeup with better settlement. Is this a good or bad idea?

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Just to let you know .... leaving the country suspends both the Statute of Limitations as well as Judgments. Which means, the time you were out of the country is NOT counted when figuring out if the SOL has passed. They can be enforced again when you come back.

If you have 2 more years on SOL, but you leave the country and come back 10 years later, the SOL hasn't expired yet, and you still have to face 2 more years before you can say the SOL as expired.

So, if you plan on leaving the country, plan also on *NEVER* coming back to the US. Is just a debt of $20K worth that high a tradeoff for you?

Just another piece of advice. Do not, EVER, move the money from your 401(k) plan to any other vehicle, not even an IRA. 401(k) monies are garnishment-proof and bankruptcy-proof (or at least, so I have been told)

I am unclear about something. Are all of the accounts with collections agencies, or just one? On those with the original creditor, there is hope still. I have written a lot on this subject here and at Creditboards because I have a similar problem. For example, Merrick offered to settle at 50% when I got behind six months. Citi told me if I made payments for six more months, (after falling seriously behind) I could settle the rest.

All of them offered hardship plans with either reduced or no interest, and reduced monthly payments.

If you stopped paying in May, why is one account at a collection agency already? All of mine have given me at least six months.

An alternative is to get on a hardship plan, then settle in the future. If that interests you, read some of my posts here and at Creditboards (I use karentut over there).

Also, if you have child support, you must have children. Are you willing to leave them behind to escape debt?

Just my thoughts after having struggled with a similar problem for the last year.

Originally posted by Karen I am unclear about something. Are all of the accounts with collections agencies, or just one? On those with the original creditor, there is hope still. I have written a lot on this subject here and at Creditboards because I have a similar problem. For example, Merrick offered to settle at 50% when I got behind six months. Citi told me if I made payments for six more months, (after falling seriously behind) I could settle the rest.

All of them offered hardship plans with either reduced or no interest, and reduced monthly payments.

If you stopped paying in May, why is one account at a collection agency already? All of mine have given me at least six months.

An alternative is to get on a hardship plan, then settle in the future. If that interests you, read some of my posts here and at Creditboards (I use karentut over there).

Also, if you have child support, you must have children. Are you willing to leave them behind to escape debt?

Just my thoughts after having struggled with a similar problem for the last year.

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Hello, Karen,

I've read some of your postings here and believe that we are in a similar situation. At least one common thing - The debt are large!

But looks like we are approaching to the problem in different ways.

I am not going to deal with OCs. I want to let all my CC accounts goes into CAs hand and deal with them. I believe that making them or at least making them FEEL like that it's difficult to get money from me, they will come up with better settlement.

I have funds available to pay them about 30% of what I owe them. I heard a lot of people settling at 50%. But I need make this number down to 30!

To do that I need something. I need some weapon to attack them. These weapons can be given by CAs (when CAs violate laws).

So this is my plan.
Deal with CAs for a while (Only in writing) and let them violate rules.
Then I ask for 30% settlement for not sueing them for the violation they made.

I just got a letter from a collection lwayer and he already violated a law in his FIRST writing! I hope him to break more in the future. So that I can use as my weapon when I need it.

Oh, I think they can turn your account to a CA if it is 90 days late.

I don't want to take any hadship plan. Bottom line is pay minimum or whatever amount they ask for each month for that plan, still amount I owe them will not be decreased (even so it will be very small).

I personally think taking hadship plan is like paying minimum payment or interest every month. This will not fix my problem any soon. I've been paying minimum payments for many years and have no reason to do it more.

If things does not go well as I planned, I will file for a bankruptcy. I got nothing to lose by doing that. Got no home or anything.

Yeah, I could leave this country if I want to, but It's just a threat that I want to use against CAs to make them to come up with better settlement. Even though I have to leave for some other reason, I can still support my kid (Why can't?) and make visitation.

Here is why I don't do what you are doing. The reps with the OC's have been good to deal with with one exception. The few times that I have dealt with CA's, they have been total A**H****. I just cannot deal with that stress level. Also, I firmly believe they will sue me if I default because of the size of my debt.

In addition, I cannot do bankruptcy. I have too many accounts receivable and also equity in my home which is not protected in BK. So, I am doing the best I can until my money comes in. I got myself in this mess and now I have to get myself out.

I have to say you must have a lot higher capacity for dealing with stress than I do. I could not do what you are doing.

Maybe we should do a poll and see which strategy the board members think is best.

I sure have a lot to say to ya CashBack. Far more than I could put here.

Much of it has to do with how you chose to deal with this problem and what the long term ramifications would be to your own sense of self respect. To make a very long story short, hiding from our problems makes ALL of us feel badly about ourselves, whether we even know it or not.

I do have 2 items of advice for you. First, do not run and hide. Make up your mind right now to deal with this. Your own sense of self worth, and self esteem will be worth a temporary set back, not to mention the relationship with your kids. Once the decision is made not to run, and that you'll deal with it, one way or another, your mind will miraculously shift from confusion to solutions. Running is no longer an option, and we can move on.

That said, MANY Bankruptcy attorneys have a little side business going, that of debt negotiation. Quite often, for a small fee, (say $1,000 or so) they will take on your creditors for you and make deals with them for you to settle your accounts under favorable terms. They often get an average of 30% or so, especially if you can pay that immediately. I'd start calling around to some BK attys. and see if they or anyone they know will help you. AVOID at all cost "Professional Debt Negotiation Services". They are worthless, and many of them are now under investigation. Go straight to a private BK atty.

If you do need to file BK you'll already have a relationship with an atty. BK is an option, a respectable one, in my opinion, for those who've gotten so far over their heads they can't dig out. It is NOT the same as running and hiding.

YOU simply are not equipped right now to deal with this alone. It takes MONTHS of hard work and study just to begin to get a handle on the complexity of this stuff. And not being a US citizen and all, it all has to be terribly confusing.

1) Face your problems standing upright. You'll respect yourself in the morning. Hate to sound like your Dad but trust me, been there done that

2) Get some help. Sometimes we just need to reach out and ask someone for help, as hard as that is

Originally posted by Butch I sure have a lot to say to ya CashBack. Far more than I could put here.

Much of it has to do with how you chose to deal with this problem and what the long term ramifications would be to your own sense of self respect. To make a very long story short, hiding from our problems makes ALL of us feel badly about ourselves, whether we even know it or not.

I do have 2 items of advice for you. First, do not run and hide. Make up your mind right now to deal with this. Your own sense of self worth, and self esteem will be worth a temporary set back, not to mention the relationship with your kids. Once the decision is made not to run, and that you'll deal with it, one way or another, your mind will miraculously shift from confusion to solutions. Running is no longer an option, and we can move on.

That said, MANY Bankruptcy attorneys have a little side business going, that of debt negotiation. Quite often, for a small fee, (say $1,000 or so) they will take on your creditors for you and make deals with them for you to settle your accounts under favorable terms. They often get an average of 30% or so, especially if you can pay that immediately. I'd start calling around to some BK attys. and see if they or anyone they know will help you. AVOID at all cost "Professional Debt Negotiation Services". They are worthless, and many of them are now under investigation. Go straight to a private BK atty.

If you do need to file BK you'll already have a relationship with an atty. BK is an option, a respectable one, in my opinion, for those who've gotten so far over their heads they can't dig out. It is NOT the same as running and hiding.

YOU simply are not equipped right now to deal with this alone. It takes MONTHS of hard work and study just to begin to get a handle on the complexity of this stuff. And not being a US citizen and all, it all has to be terribly confusing.

1) Face your problems standing upright. You'll respect yourself in the morning. Hate to sound like your Dad but trust me, been there done that

2) Get some help. Sometimes we just need to reach out and ask someone for help, as hard as that is

Good luck Cashback. Let us know what ya find out.

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Thank you for the advice Butch!

I've decided not to hide but to face.
BK will me my last choice since I have some fund available to settle.

Yeah I don't want to live another 10 year in the darkness because I've done it already for 10 years by paying credit bill with another credit card. I should have stopped doing it already.

1*I realize that if I follow this validation tactic then I risk law suits. I think this is one negative side of this tactic.
2*However, by asking validation, spending some time to age the debit and making settlement (deletion in return) I hope I can quickly come back to normal life.
3*Someone tell me to just vanish. and not talk to them. If I vanish, they can't sue me.
4*How can they get a judgment without suing me? I think they can't sue me if they can't find me. Am I wrong?
5*Yeah, in fact I am not a US citizen so in worst case I can just leave here. I guess I can use this when I ask them come up with better settlement. Is this a good or bad idea?
cashback
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1*So how do you avoid getting sued by not validating?
2*Sounds like a plan.
3*Well won't you be shocked when you wind up with a judgment then?
4*The person who told you that if you can't be found you can't be sued is wrong. All states have alternative service if they can't find you. That can be service by publication. They just put a notice in the newspaper.keepmine 1349 posts since Aug 2001
5*Perfect until you come back and have to face all the judgments on top of all the other credit woes you left behind.