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Every time my two and half year old toddler wants to call Papa, his mouth utters MaPa, and then again he tries to correct it , but all in vain as we could only hear MaPa. Then, he takes a deep breath, finally some pause and hmmmmm he call outs Papaaaaa!

If you ask me, I feel that's the perfect way to address his Papa ... MaPa! Fathers are indeed the "Part and parcel" of kids life, but we also see how the role of "Papa has changed" quite recently. Quite recently when I suggested the topic "My better half is a better mom as well" to Sheroes, they agreed readily and I really got a very positive response for it.

Do you remember Aamir Khan, Kareena Kapoor and Rani Mukherji in Talaash. How Aamir son's calls him Adda, I really liked it! Isn't a unique way of addressing someone very special in your life?

And that's one of the reason I feel MaPa is so justified and sweet for my better half and for his role model!

When I stepped into Motherhood, within very first month at
my native place as part of the tradition I was asked to worship a well and seek
its blessings. Engineered by modern education and beliefs I simply smiled and
shrugged it off – Why do I need to worship a well, that’s insane! My
mother told me - As a well is full of water quenching thirst to many, in a
similar manner, you ask well to fill your breasts with milk, so your kid is satisfied and never hungry.

A simple tradition and holds such an important message, but
I was wired to ignore it! How many of us living in urban areas feel the same
way? Globalization, technology and information that is now at fingertips, but aren’t we missing the human
touch?

How many of us can still smell the “saundhi khusbhoo” [sweet smell] of the earth after first rains? Not many, thanks to Air conditioned Offices.

How many of us would go on a vacation to their natives to celebrate the traditional festivals? Not many, thanks to trips to Malaysia, Maldives and Thailand being cheaper.

How many remember the upcoming festivals, unless it is under a holiday list in your Office or your kid’s school diary?

How many of us know how to cook traditional recipes for a specific festival?

How many of us prefer celebrating festivals that fall on the weekend?

One of my friend Sandeep [Changed on request] who loves
travelling and is a blogger says – Urbanization has at one hand provided us
with a lot of opportunities to explore, experiment and experience other
traditions but on the flip side has distant us from our traditions and values.
He continues, just for example at our place the first chapatti made is served
to cow, now it’s hard to find a cow outside India or even in metros in India,
where you can go and feed them. So you simply ignore it.

Another lady, a mom of five months old says – Nuclear family
is one of the prime reasons of getting disconnected from the roots. Blame it too hectic work schedule [when earlier work
used to end by 5 pm] that by the time people return home they are
exhausted. We usually wait for “weekends” to do something different and
unluckily our festivals not necessarily fall on
the weekends. However, once you have a kid, you want to pass your traditions to
them and maybe that’s when you get into celebration no matter what, as I am
planning to dress my little as Krishna for upcoming Janamasthmi.

“A nation’s
culture resides in the hearts and the
soul of it's people – Mahatma
Gandhi.”

Another girl in her twenties believes an elderly at home can
make a lot of difference in how we value our traditions. She says – When my
parents are at home, I feel like someone’s waiting at home. And as you knock
the door, the incense sticks fragrance and the fresh lemon rice aroma connect
you more deeply. We may be busy with our busy schedule, but the oldies still
have a lot of time, and they make sure that even we are connected. With parents
and in-laws at home, it is said the house
is blessed!

We could site ‘n’ number of lame excuses or obligation
to drift away from our roots, but is it not our choice of living? We
choose to apply an antiseptic rather than turmeric, we choose to wean away a
kid from mother’s milk because she has to return to work, we choose to be
guided by others rather than our instincts, we choose ….

This recent post on BusinessInsider caught my eye – The famous IBM inventor Lisa DeLuca visited a technology conference with her daughter, and if you just visualized this with a nanny following her, you are totally mistaken. Take a closer look at her photo (above), dressed in formals and high heels she carried her baby proudly!

Did you ever hear words like Techno-guilt and
Techno-shaming? Well, we can understand, being a working parent, and juggling
to strike a right balance you might have simply shrugged off these “unwanted” Internet jargon! But, you need to know just
because you a parent to a child born in internet and technology world.

Techno-guilt is when a parent feels guilty because he uses
technology like television, laptop, Smartphone to keep his kids occupied, more
like using technology as a babysitter! Techno-shaming is when a parent feels the
guilt on allowing his child to use technology in a public space. Have you ever
noticed the frowning faces of elderly people
and the stare they give you as if saying…
How can you do this to your child?

So are you the one who can relate to above situation? Well,
then here is the solution…

I want my Toddler to be active physically rather than being a couch potato
straining his eyes!

We completely understand you
to want your toddler to be away from the screen
and be more active physically, playing, jumping, dancing and blah blah blah!
Are these your expectations from a child?
If you said a YES, then even child would have same expectation from
you… or better to say child imitates what parents do…isn’t? So do you.

·Read a book before going to sleep or browse your
smartphone or watch your favorite serial
on television?

·In your free time, you go out to a park and meet friends or simply play Candy
Crush on your phone?

·To unwind yourself, you play music and dance/workout or hold your Kindle to read your favorite book.

If you chose the latter option, you are yourself using
“technology”. Your child just knows that “the toy” used by my mummy and
papa is quite tempting, and he tries to
imitate you. So unless you throw out technology from your home and neighborhood,
you do not have a way to prevent your toddler with charms of technology!

Okay, I got it! So what’s the
Solution?

These
technologies would exist, and your child
would have to grow with these around him. So rather than feeling guilty about
allowing your children to use them look out for ways to direct him to RIGHT
CONTENT for a LIMITED TIME.

In fact few of the studies
have shown that the screen time enhances kid’s skill when compared to
television viewing, for one simple reason being – on a tablet/smartphone kid is
more interactive, the kid is expected to perform an action and understand the logic.
On the other hand, television is a simple
idiot box that does not need a response,
and a continuous stare could strain kid’s eyes.

Here are quick tips to divert your kid’s time to fun and
interactive learning -

· Teach them to handle the devices carefully,
rather than always to say NO. When you say NO to him, it surprises him as he is unable to understand why that NO when you yourself are using the same thing.

·Choose
content that are designed for your
toddler, even if they are paid, it’s worth the money

·Do not always use
“technology” as a babysitter [ Well, agreed unless you hand over your toddler
your iPad, he will not let you take a bath or cook food] but make sure to let
him know what he is dealing with, like Wheels on the
Bus a superbly animated and highly
interactive app. From spinning the wheels to swishing the wipers, there
is plenty for children to poke and slide and they'll love the music, almost as
much as you'll hate it.

·Limit the time. Okay,
we will watch your favorite rhyme for ten minutes and then we’ll have dinner.

Your kid needs you and you need him, so lets make efforts from our side to make this relationship a beautiful one.

When I decided to sail alone, i.e. to start off as a freelancer after a decade of full-time employment, I wasn't sure if I would be able to get help. But I was determined to get a decent project that pays me decent and allows me to be a mother, and freelancing was the best bet!

I started with naukri.com, but not much was offered to me, I tried linkedin, glassdoor, freelancer.in , elance, odesk but it felt like I had to learn to swim along with sharks! And, in fact I'm not a great swimmer! I like to sail at my pace, on my conditions :D

So here is a quick guide for people looking to jump onto work from home, part-time or freelancing opportunities.

Pick Your Core Area - There are multiple types of job profile available, do not just pick one because you are being offered that, you decide what you want to do - Data Entry, Mystery Shopping, Content Writing, Recruiting, Testing, Mobile App Development and any such fields like this.

Get a demo project ready - The difficult part with such kind of opportunities is that people judge you by what you have done, so if you have a good experience then that would speak, but if you are just starting off, make sure to have a demo project ready and published on www. You could use any of the free tools like word press/blogger to showcase that.

Decide on your rate card - Most of the project owners would like to get the best quality work in minimum price. So do not go with what is offered, of course that again differs with you being a beginner or a pro in the field. So if possible do some market research and know whats the market rate offered for your expertise. You could register on these sites like freelancer.in, odesk,elance to get a rough idea. Or connect via linkedin and talk to people who are already working in this area.

Shortlist and research on companies who could hire you - Just for example if you are good in mobile app development, look out for companies who work in this domain and send them a proposal they cant refuse!

Be Patient - The last point is the most vital and important one, you would not get a good opportunity overnight so you need to be patient and keep trying! You know - there is just one opportunity waiting just for YOU.

I personally tried "n" number of websites to get an opportunity for myself, here are the sites I tried myself and my opinion about them -

naukri.com - You may get calls through this , but clearly mention in the summary that you are looking for a work from home, part-time or freelancing opportunity. Applying to the jobs displayed on naukri.com may not help, and its sheer waste of time.

timesjobs.com, shine.com, monsterindia.com - They are not much of any help! I personally did not get much calls through these sites.

freelancer.in, odesk,elance - These sites are good and you may get lucky [ I wasn't] , but I would not recommend these sites to beginners as the bidding strategy make you feel demotivated. When you see there are already "x" applicants for this project, you are bound to shake a bit. So if possible stay far from these sites.

sheroes.in - The site exclusively for women [ however even men can register] is like a genie to me. It has given me so many projects till date that I should be really grateful to them. You should definitely try it out.

hersecondinnings.com - Again a site exclusive for women, did helped me in getting couple of projects.

doparttime.com - Although their domain exclusively say "doparttime" but I hardly found opportunities on this site.

gharsenaukri.com - Not much of help to me. But they have projects to explore out.

workflexi.in - I guess this venture has just started as there are many issues with the website, but you may try.

craiglist uk and la and other cities - craiglist also is a good option to explore global opportunities, however not all people entertain other country applicants, hence you need to be clear and patient enough with this.

linkedin - Mentioning clearly on your profile that you are looking for a freelancing/part-time opportunities does help.

Hope the guide helps you to get work done. Feel free to post comments/feedback on the post.

Coming Jan 2016, I would be completing an year when I resigned from my full-time employment and started working as a freelancer. Time really flies ...in

... Getting new clients and projects..
...playing with my new born and didn't missed even a second of his growth and activities
... managing maids and to make them understand that I'm still working...
... Got to know how the IT and non-IT sector works and I'll like to stick to IT world
....Lost few kgs.... yipeeee for that..
.... Made new friends.. double yipeeee for that
.... and yet again my belief of "Keep Faith" helped me

Being a working mother, I'm really thankful to sheroes for providing us with platform to be a working mother from home. recently, I was asked to write a couple of reviews on beauty products provided by Aplava and so here it goes -

Did you just made an excuse to your boss that you won’t be able to travel as you got a medical emergency? You are the person who keeps on postponing the family vacation to a Hill station with a simple excuse that your boss is not sanctioning leaves. Are you the one who loves to spend his vacation on his favorite couch with TV remote, maggi and lots of tea?

IF you answered a yes to even one question above, you are not alone! There are many like you, and the best part is they have the weirdest excuse just to avoid travel.

And if you are still wondering whether you fall into a category of wanderlust or a motionless nerd! We give you top five reasons that may conclude you love immobility, Are you ready? Let’s get started –

My Home is Safest Place on Earth!

What if I travel and the plane gets crashed or hijacked, a cruise may get stranded on a deserted island or hit by pirates. And journey via road - Do you know how many people die each year because of road accidents? What if my hotel room is attacked and all my valuables are stolen. I get mugged on that stranger land. Gosh! I can’t travel, it seems so risky.
My home sweet home is just the most secure place on earth!

I love Pampering!

The idea of weekend spending and vacation time for me is to book an appointment in a spa and just drench in aromas and positivity. It’s so much fun!

My Window Seat

The sea-facing window or the garden-facing window is my favorite spot. Boarding the window seat with a cup of ginger tea gives me a kick early morning and in the evening warding off all my stress. And if I miss that “me time” I feel void in my life.

Packing and Unpacking

Travelling causes stress to me!
First before travelling plan and pack your bags, which usually starts almost one-two weeks earlier as that includes shopping and then once you back again unpack the stuff. Gosh!! It feels like the travel time was for a whole month rather than a couple of days.
Why stress yourself so much? Go shopping relax and unwind!

The Motion Issue

Well, it’s both types of motion the one on the road that causes sickness and the other one in the bathroom which causes worst of trouble!
With travel, you indulge in junk food causing constipation and then the issue of getting pressure at the “right time” just because the sightseeing guy would arrive at Sharp 8:00 clocks.
Is this vacation planned for fun or to torture me?
I’ll prefer staying at home and wait for the pressure jiggy to happen.

So did you find your reason of being termed as non-traveler?

Some people have wanderlust and some like to search out the essence of life at same place, all acceptable and pretty normal. It’s just about the rhythm of going with the flow. So what’s your reason of not travelling?

The buzz of work-life balance is all over, companies taking initiatives , offering facilities and yet we have people who are suffering from High Blood Pressure or Cholesterol or even heart ailments at any early age. Is it just the propaganda or actually people are serious about it.

What is Work-Life Balance

To define the term, it is as simple as that you are able to equally divide your life time and spend time with family and friends ,get some quality time for yourselves ,be in good health, able to meet all your family expectations, complete your household pending tasks but still be a star performer in your company. Yes , I know you are smiling because this is the "ideal case" which seems to be non existing. So then work-life balance is just a fantasy. isn't?

How much time actually we have after office hours

Why do you need work-life balance because although companies mention that its just 40-45 hrs of working a week so rest of the time[80-75 hrs for five days a week + weekend] is at your disposal and the luxury to use it however you want, then why so much fuss what work-life balance?

Even if we simply reduce the 45 hrs of working , then we are left with 75+48=123 hrs but we are missing here some of the points -

Sleep Time - No matter what, you need an average of 8 hrs sleep per day, but I know you are a busy person so lets reduce it to 7 hrs a day. Lets do some math now , for a week you need 7*7 = 49 hrs of sleep. So now you have remaining hrs left 123-49 = 74 hrs at your disposal, unless you cut down further on your sleep.

Commute Time - Most of offices are located in the middle of the city and people usually have their homes at other corners leading to an increase in commute time. This time although you are not working or doing your household work but is crucial . There were many reports and studies done, which clearly says that commute time affects the well being of the person and in fact a study conducted by the thisismoney says that on an average human spend 200 hrs a year in just commuting. So lets do some math again so on an average for each month we spend ~17 [200/12 months]hrs and for each week ~4.25 hrs[17/4 weeks]. So we are left with 74-4.25 hrs = 69.75 hrs

Routine work - Now you obviously need time for your frequent bathroom breaks which includes, shower, shaving, hygienic stuff. Again the studies shows we spent on an average 182 hrs per year in bathroom. That's huge!!Again some math , so for each month ~15 hrs and for each week ~4 hrs . So we are left with 69.75 - 4.00 = 65.75 hrs every week.

Eating Time - Now that's also necessary, as we are working to feed our hungry tummy. And studies revealed that an average American spend around ~1 hr each day in eating[all meals included] so for a week it should be 7 hrs , then we are left with 65.75-7 = 58.75 hrs

Other miscellaneous activities - There are other activities which are really like routine stuff , but really necessary to do like waiting for elevator, waiting to board a train, waiting time to cross the road, parking your car and list could go on so lets assume an hr daily for such activities , so for a week 7 hrs of misc activities and now we are left with 58.75 - 7 = 51.75 hrs.

Office hours Overlap with other geographies - As the work has been outsourced , we are well aware that we need to adjust our timings so that we interact with them. That would definitely lead to more office hours or if you are at home taking call from from there but that's the important part of our planning . So may be on an average 5 hours of overlap is needed . So we are left with 51.75-5 = 46.75 hrs. Lets round it to 46 hrs.

So we now have the number , that we only have 46 hrs each week for our disposal to be spent on family, your gym time, sports, social networking ,talking over phone and of course overtime for office work.

Holding the purest form of life, I used to seldom think even I would have been like this then what have changed? Why I need so many corrections now and then, why often I’m distracted, the anger which overpowers me now and then was it existing when I was an infant?

As I’m now lucky to spent my time with kid, I observed how clean and truthful soul they are, and as he is growing I’m sure he’ll get adulterated and be somewhat like us. So I don’t forget my chaste and virtuous boy, thought of putting all things I should learn from him -

Breathe properly

No fear of losing -

Grow at your own pace

Express your likes and dislikes

Only need of milk, sleep, nappy change and lots of love

Curious and always eager to learn new things

Trust your intuitions

Express Your Love

It’s worth remembering that even we were a kid someday and these were the things done by us as well, just that in fear, competition and fast paced life we forgot the essence of thing called life.

With 24hr availability of hundreds of TV channels and owners focus area being the high rated TRP’s, I feel my kid would miss the righteousness of doordarshan.

While we waited for the republic day parade show on doordarshan, I was overwhelmed when vande matram song was played and it showcased all the different dance forms in India and I walked down the memory lane to my childhood days when TV viewing was restricted to Doordarshan and how we used to wait for any of its telecast.

For kids, we all agree that seeing is much better learning than reading it and I would admit that, I learnt a lot from TV specifically about India and its culture. I knew the different dance forms in India; I knew the famous and real jewels of india, from pandit jasraj to ustad amjad ali khan the famous sarod player or be it famous bansuri player pandit hariprasad chaurasia, the different art forms, the ancient history and the mythological part of India all I owe to Doordarshan. Another advantage I saw was that these songs made a room for my learning these skills. I was inclined to dance and wanted to pursue it, not to win any competition but just for myself.

Those days when TV was considered to be a luxury and neighbors and their neighbors all used to gather to watch Ramayana or cricket match. I’ll like to give credit to Doordarshan that taught me that fun is with people around and not alone. Today, I mostly sit alone browsing thousands of channel and don’t feel the punch of it.

I used to watch what my parents used to watch so I got used to news and also to humlog on doordarshan and lucky me that we never had any restrictions in viewing.

But today scenario has changed completely, what I watch today

songs

some movies

award functions

a cookery show

reality shows

So what I can expect my kid to learn from these?

How to become famous?

How to make fun of others and laugh on them?

Slang… F**k you, You such an a** h**e

Dance forms – would be just salsa, hip-hop, belly,gangnam style

When asked about Indian culture and its representation – would they just be able to take names of salman khan and Katrina kaif?

As a parent there are loads of controls or app to get the restricted viewing for kids but how could I assure my kid is expose to the Indian culture and its diversity? I know we have even moved ahead with the way of teaching and now blackboard with a chalk has been replaced with smart classes, but it’s again school-learning, I’m not giving the advantage of play and learn here. And to let him choose what he want to pursue in life.