Jumpy? Us? On the tenth anniversary of 9/11? Who's jumpy? Oh my god did you hear fighter jets got scrambled to intercept a flight headed to New York this is it we're all going to die oh god

Not that we totally freaked out when that story broke on Twitter (credit to @NYSCanner)! No, we were totally calm, swear to God, about the report that jets had been launched to intercept American Airlines 34, on which "3 passengers [were] locked in a restroom refusing to come out." And then it turned out that it wasn't a big deal, which we totally knew from the very start, which is we were all "NBD":

A security official said the jets were launched "out of an abundance of caution." The flight landed safely after 4 p.m, and investigators were waiting at the airport.

Fox News' Ed Henry reports that only two passengers were dawdling in the bathroom, while a third was merely "suspicious." (Who wants to place bets on this turning out to be three Middle Eastern-looking guys being in the wrong place at the wrong time?) There was an air marshal on board anyway, and we were basically ice cubes, we were so cool.

Update: Sounds like it was a couple of drunks!

Several sources tell NBC News that two, possibly three, passengers were drunk and refused to follow flight attendant instructions, making long and frequent visits to the lavatories.

[...]

Passengers told NBC New York after landing that they didn't even know there was an incident on board until they saw police meeting the flight on the ground.

We fully endorse scrambling jets over unruly drunk people everywhere, in the air and on the ground.