Stanford Doesn't Dig Prison Digs

Accused Ponzi schemer requests transfer from detention facility

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Accused Ponzi schemer Robert Allen Stanford has discovered that summer in a hot, crowded Texas detention facility is not fun.

You know what's not fun? Being in prison! In fact, it's almost as if the government makes prison sort of unpleasant to deter people from committing crimes!

This point appears to have been lost on the billionaire cricket mogul and accused fraudbot Allen Stanford, who recently asked to be moved out of his current detention facility because it was so unpleasant.

Blame Them For Your Empty Wallet

"For at least a week, during the hottest part of the summer, with outside temperatures of 100 degrees (38 Celsius) or more, the place where Allen Stanford is being held as a pretrial detainee has had no air conditioning and for part of that time was without power altogether," Stanford's attorney, Dick DeGuerin, said in a court filing on Sunday.

Stanford, who has been in custody since his arrest on June 18, is being housed in a single cell that he shares with between eight and 10 other men, according to the filing.

Prison is one thing. A Texas prison in the middle of summer without air conditioning is quite another. It is actual Hell on earth.

But, you know, that's one reason you try not to get into scrapes like being accused of $7 billion Ponzi scheme frauds. It is too bad for Stanford that he has to stew in a bath of sweat from eight to ten other men while awaiting trial. But a lot of other guys are in that detention facility too. Very few of them, if any, ever had the opportunity to enjoy quite as fabulous a lifestyle as Stanford did before he got popped.

HVAC consultant Sara K. Smith writes for NBC and Wonkette, and reminds you to change your air conditioner's filter frequently.