Alibi Volume 22, Number 03

January 17, 2013

It’s 2013. Learn a new skill, create a new talent, water some small seed of knowledge with your tears of discontent and let it grow into a monstrous tree of self-congratulatory bluster. The tree can never be taken from you. Instead of a compulsive chip-eater, become a compulsive chip-eater who knows how to fold an origami frog and drive a semi-truck.

Learning to sew again has been on my resolution list for at least five years. Patterns have accumulated, and my browser's DIY sewing project bookmarks have grown unwieldy. After doing a little research, I ended up contacting The Designer's Lounge, whose Facebook page has been a source of inspiration. I messaged co-owner Teresa Romero, and she offered to give me a lesson on the basics. I may have been the most pedal-shy student ever, but Romero's patience and encouragement and her clear demonstrations and descriptions had me anxiously but steadily humming away.

I’m sure some people still think hackers are internet troll-type losers who spend their days cracking codes, infiltrating databases and basically screwing up the system. Well, those people haven’t been to Quelab. Quelab, for those of you who aren’t in the know, is a local hackerspace right here in Burque. If you’re anything like me, who had no preconceived notions of what a hackerspace would entail (minus watching that terrible Angelina Jolie movie in the ’90s), then you might find yourself pleasantly surprised.

How I almost learned to play an instrument without trying very hard

By Carl Petersen

For over five decades I've practiced an intense and, I think, quite reasonable refusal to acknowledge the very existence of dulcimers. Yet dulcimers exist, if only in defiance of my will. Also, Cyndi Lauper plays the dulcimer, and I can do anything Lauper can. Anything.

How do you go about turning your yard into a pastoral pecking ground for a handful of chooks? The folks over at the Old School have your back. For the incredibly low price of $7, you can sign up for a one-hour class that will introduce you to all the basics of the urban chicken lifestyle.

We’re about mid-way through flu season here in New Mexico, so it’s not too late to get this year’s vaccination, thereby vastly reducing your chances of “catching a bug” that could, at the very least, set you stumbling back and forth on the trail of tears between your bedroom and bathroom for several days while your significant other spends their free time changing sheets, scrubbing the toilet bowl, and trying to figure out which carpet cleaner is most likely to get the vomit stains out of the rug. At worst, a bad case of the flu could see your loved ones spending their free time making funeral arrangements and fighting over who gets your vinyl records. So why take the risk?

A whale bit my legs off and all I got was sex with a musclebound Belgian

By Devin D. O’Leary

It’s possible the ailments afflicting the French drama Rust and Bone are not the result of anything culturally specific. They could simply be the the sole artistic bias of writer-director Jacques Audiard, with no reflection on his fellow, Sorbonne-educated countrymen. But damned if—in their dark, existential, ennui-riddled self-importance—they don’t feel oh-so-French.

The shot-in-New-Mexico drama Warrior Womanby writer-director Julie Reichert will have its debut screening January 19 through 21 at Guild Cinema in Nob Hill. The Student Union Building Theater at UNM fires up its projectors for a full seven-day schedule this semester. New Mexico Women in Filmwill hold its next meeting on Tuesday, Jan. 22, at the Center for Contemporary Arts (1050 Old Pecos Trail) in Santa Fe.

“King of the Nerds” on TBS

By Devin D. O’Leary

TBS’ reality competition “King of the Nerds” isn’t anything television hasn’t seen before. It’s one of those “Survivor”-meets-“The Real World” shows that tosses a bunch of people into a house, gives them some prize money to fight for, then sits back and watches as they bump one another off in their quest to become the last man or woman standing. The show gets major bonus points, however, for going all the way with its concept.

It must be an exceptional quality that brings The Peking Acrobats to Albuquerque’s Popejoy Hall on January 20th for their fourth consecutive year of body-bending spectacle. After all, to accommodate everything from big-name Broadway shows to world-class dance troupes, a venue’s got to be selective.

Street food steps out at Urban Hotdog Company

By Gail Guengerich

UHDC opened their doors three months ago in a strip center near Cottonwood Mall. Their approach is to doll up a Nathan’s Famous all-beef frankfurter with everything under the sun—particularly foodie favorites like fancy cheeses, fresh herbs, slaws and sauces.

﻿ARIES (March 21-April 19): Writing at io9.com, Charlie Jane Anders provides "10 Signs You Could Be the Chosen Savior." Among the clues are the following: 1. "How often does someone come up to you on the street, point at you, gibber something inarticulate and run away?" 2. "How many robot/clone duplicates of yourself have you come across?" 3. "Is there a blurry black-and-white photo or drawing from history that sort of looks like you?" 4. "Have you achieved weird feats that nobody could explain, but which nobody else witnessed?" Now would be a good time for you to take this test, Aries. You're in a phase of your astrological cycle when your dormant superpowers may finally be awakening—a time when you might need to finally claim a role you've previously been unready for.

Tractor Brewing Taproom

New Mexico Humanities Council

Award-winning documentary filmmaker and fine-art photographer Miguel Gandert shows his work highlighting his mestizaje heritage, and the fusion and tension of the relationship between Spanish Colonial and Native Cultures of the Americas. Runs through 12/29.