I am on the back side of my 40’s starting today 🙂 I am glad to be starting a new year. I have to admit that I am happy to put the year of my 45th behind me and have that feeling of starting a new year in my life.

I will admit that my 45th was a wild ride.. while there were certainly a number of highs and lots of just really good moments, events and days.. there was also a lot of lows, a lot of struggle and more time finding my footing after it felt like it had been swept right out from under me.

I had a very hard time on my 44th as it was the year that I truly was forced to accept that we would not be able to keep trying or have another child. For those that are knew to the blog, we were blessed with both a daughter (Maeve) and a son (Nathaniel) but both were born as premies and passed within days or hours of being born.. There was years of trying, many lost little ones within the first months over the years.. Its hard to let go.. The gentleman above is my rock, he has been with me though it all and I am so lucky to share my world with him!

I come into 46 with a more narrow view of what is important to me, what I want in my life, what I do not want in my life. There are changes afoot. I also come into year 46 with many blessings, a better understanding of what has value to me. I feel like 45 did some trimming of things to make room for what is to come. I am ready to spread my wings and let go of what must be and let the wind carry in the new.

This is scary, hard but a needed thing.. I am looking forward to all the new things we have planned for the coming year.. plans for myself, plans for the farm, plans with my wonderful dear hubby! Plans with my friends and family Some will be local, like when we went hiking just down the way in the photo below.. other’s might take us to further place and maybe even see new land.. I have a craving to go in the coming year!

So hope you will stick around for the coming year here on the blog, there will be recipes, lots of photos, more video’s, lots of farm things but also some trips in there. Bless you all

I want to send out a big Thank you to my readers, you have no idea how much your comments at times have meant to me over the past year.. some of you reached out when I was off line and sent me the most wonderful notes! Some of you just made my day, some of you I feel like I have gotten to know you and that if we ever could, that it would great to sit down and have a meal and visit in person. Thank you to the those that we have done just that.. I am grateful for those that I have been able to connect with face to face 🙂

17 Responses to Farmgal’s turning 46

Happy birthday! I look forward to reading about your adventures for the coming year.

My heart hurts for you about your babies. I was in a similar situation and never could bring one to term. You learn to accept and move on. I’m in my 60s now and hindsight is a wonderful lens to put things in perspective.

Thank you for the birthday wishes.. I am looking forward to the new year as well.. I hear you on the little ones, I think time does allow us to accept in a way but the pain is always there just sitting under the surface in that very tender spot. Thank you for your insight into how age helps..

Happy, happy birthday! I really love reading your posts. When I first started over 5 years ago, I lived in upstate NY, and thought “she’s so close”. I’ve lived in Maine and now in Oregon and while the physical distance between us is greater, I think following your blog has given me a continued sense of “oh, she’s so close.” I appreciate you sharing your thoughtful and thought-provoking journey. Here’s to a fabulous 46 and beyond!

Peace in your heart is hard to achieve. You both have felt so much. As a couple taking good care of each other is what makes every day special. 57 years married and we still marvel at all we have been through. The main thing is know you are loved.
Enjoy all the thought that goes into your daily blog. As well as all the hard work each day on the farm. Looking forward to your sharing of the year to come. Happy Birthday!

Thank you for sharing about your darling babies. It’s sad and strange the way things turn out.

My sister and her husband lost their first child this way before they had their oldest. Yes they have three boys now, all of which have become strapping, kind young men, but still. They grieve for this child and wonder what he could have become.

Husband was extremely premature himself. He was born at 26 weeks and was the smallest baby the hospital had ever successfully looked after at the time he was born. The psychiatrist who diagnosed Husband with Asperger’s syndrome was surprised he had survived, and described it as ‘being on the extreme end of viability.’

I find we can talk about it more freely now then we could even ten years ago and it always amazes me how many families have losses. I am so glad your sister and hubby had three kind young men.

My mom had all of us early but only my little brother was truly premature, he was same enough that when he came home months after being born, he was dressed in my dolly outfits for a while. He was a fragile child health wise and still is as a adult in many ways.

You have beautiful skin. What do you use? We had the same problem for years,(with the cats). people dropping them on our doorstep. We had ten at one time, Over the years they got old and died. We now have three younger ones. (indoor cats) We feed outdoor strays. We don’t have as
much money, since we have retired, but we do what we can. We feed stray dogs and cats.

Good morning Shell, thank you on the kind comment on my skin, I do drink a lot of water which I think helps but I most often wash my face with a clean hot water cloth only and I almost never wear make up. that’s it for most of the year.. in winter time I do use a cream, my friend makes. http://www.adagionaturals.com

I had showed her how to make cold processed soap many years ago’s and now she does a whole natural line and I get to try new products and get my favorites on birthdays/Christmas etc

Farmgals Bucket List : Farmgal's Bucket List

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