Beer Then Liquor Rule—Explained

The other day I was at work and overheard a conversation I’ve heard at least a hundred times in a hundred different places. The subject is one of the oldest and most misunderstood drinking rules ever: The Beer Then Liquor Rule. It’s mostly misunderstood because people always screw up the saying itself, which in turn sends them directly up Shit Creek without a paddle.

You’ve all heard it, or variations of it, before: “Beer then liquor, never been sicker. Liquor then beer, have no fear.” This boys and girls is the correct variation of the saying.

The problem with this handy little dandy is that it doesn’t give an explanation as to why or why not one would or would not get sick for not adhering to the beer then liquor rule. But here’s the rub, the very people to whom this saying was meant to protect are the very ones who question it. And we all know who those people are. The college-aged Green Horns. [Editor’s note: Green Horns? Nice one grandpa.]

Their first mistake is they over think the whole thing. Actually no. First, they mess up the saying. Then they use the two years of fancy schoolin’ they have under their belts to justify the order they put the saying in. I’ve heard some of the most complex and well thought out explanations you could imagine. They range from the different alcohol contents combining to create a super drug that intensifies exponentially each hour by the square root of your body weight to various alcohol combinations doing something to you that some guy saw on an X-Files rerun.

The truth is anyone who’s been drinking for more than 10 years knows exactly why the saying is true. And it has nothing to do with chemistry, aliens, full moons or anything like that. The explanation has come from generations of drunken experience and observation.

Why the Beer then Liquor Rule Works

Here it is. The definitive answer to the question of life, the universe, and everything. Sort of.

Beer then liquor, never been sicker:

Think about the progression of your night as you drink. The first few Heinekens take a while to put down, but as you relax and the alcohol takes effect, it takes a whole hell of a lot less effort to drink each beer. Each new one goes down faster than the previous until you lose count and are just drinking as fast as you can without realizing it.

This is completely fine as long as you stick to beer (Unless the beer is Steel Reserve).

Over the course of the session, you’ve increased the rate of consumption, but not the alcohol content of what you’re consuming. However, if you get to that point of rapid consumption and switch to liquor, not only have you increased consumption, you’ve increased the amount of alcohol your taking in by 30-40% per drink. This is where you black out and wake up in someone’s yard naked with one of the most monumental hangovers ever orchestrated by a sophomore P.E. major.

Liquor then beer, have no fear:

Have no fear indeed. This is the preferred M.O. for a night on the town as is the one most associated with getting laid. You start out drinking high-powered courage in a bottle, a.k.a. Jim Beam, which by drink number 4 or 5 gives you the stones to walk up to any coed in the joint and tell her to stay sober because she’s going to be driving you home tonight.

Once you’re good and animated you either start running low on cash or realize that lame line actually might have worked and you switch to beer. Like before, your rate of consumption has increased. However, the amount of alcohol consumed per drink has decreased by 30-35%. You’re essentially weaning yourself from Jim Beam’s vicious teat, thus keeping enough of your wits about you to be able to show the aforementioned coed which driveway to park in and ensuring that the only nasty thing you wake up with is in the bed next to you.

Comments

Havent had a chance to read comments but am wondering if possibly temperature has anything to do with the body’s reaction? I cant stand cold liquor drinks, which is why i dont go to bars and stand waiting for one. But the only time in recent years i ever had a bad experience aka throwing up before the night ends, was when the tequila was frozen. With beer, it almost makes no difference but preferably colder than rooom temp (california weather) i suppose these factors, while important to each persons own relationship with their inner drinking buddy, are not major points to help remember the rule or defining it. But there are connections to be made im sure… cheers

Mid 30s nowadays a here and there beer drinker, over 3 yrs nothing stronger. Put yourself in a position to cause a breath test, but never have more bac in your body when in control of a 5 ton machine. The roads a war zone, cut off a prius a day keep road rage away. And if they spent all that money on advertising, they didnt concern themselves with quality control…

I always heard it ” Beer before Liquor, You’ve Never puked quicker. Liquor before Beer you’ve nothing to fear”! I did get a laugh or two while reading your explanation. I wasn’t sure why it works out the was it does but your explanation makes sense. Thanks

I drink 12 to 18 pints of 5% beer daily and I’m fine every time if I drink liquor I’m either sick In the drunk tank In the hospital or Wondering why I’m cuddling a garden gnome while suffering three broken ribs and bloody knuckles

i took 3bottles of heineken beer after a few shots of whiskey.. I found myself vomiting profusely and tired. I find that highly risky. If you want to take whiskey take it alone no need to mix up same goes with beer

I’ve been drinking since the age of 15. I’m now 50 and many consider me an expert in the field, especially since I live in South Louisiana. I’ve been in every situation a power drinker could possibly be in, jail, public humiliation, family humiliation and friend degradation. Let me tell you, most of the bad nights were a result of beer before liquor. Just as the article states, I would slam a bunch of beers and get shitty then move to whiskey and drink em’ just as fast. Blackout city.

If u need alcohol to build enough courage to talk to & perhaps bring home a lady, chances are you might wake up next to you a “less than pretty girl” or with your sticky member in your hand. But then again beer muscles will probably help you pick up nasty skanks to screw… don’t forget your Jimmy cap dude! Have fun but be safe rather than sorry.

Eat pizza (lots of it) Burrito, hamburgers or chines food. This is before you go out. and water! When you’re out and drinking drink but also drink more water, Then eat something small, At a bar where food is served? have fries anything to soak up alcohol. and drink more water. Finally home? Eat the rest of the left over pizza or if you’re like me you bought 2 burritos while you were at chipotle.

going to bed, drink more water!

Also be smart with your drinks! don’t have a mix of clears to browns then beers to top it off you’ll wish you were dead through out your adventure or in the morning. You wanna get drunk? do the shots first then end it with a beers always works for me.

Well put sir but I have to add one sid3 bar- number 1 way to AVOID A nasty HANGOVER is STAY HYDRATED! That means for you college smarties- DRINK WATER. Or to all the basic training grads out there- STAY HYDRATED. Consume Massive amounts of h20 on DRINK day-all day. A glass an hr. AT LEAST. Good info sir again and THANK YOU!!

I think it may also have to do with the thickness of what you are ingesting. hard alcohol is thicker so you drink that first to build a base. if you drink beer first the hard alcohol tries to sink to the bottom of your stomach causing not only gas build up but churning. maybe im wrong though just the way i look at it.

Ok, the saying (as I always knew it, and seems to make more sense): Liquor before Beer never fear; Beer before liquor never sicker! I know they mean the same thing, but your saying can make the un-initiated confused (esp. after a few sips of liquor :)).

Thanks for this! I prefer whiskey, but I do like to socially drink beer with food at social gatherings. A lot of times, a cookout turns into a night out. With your advice, I’ll skip the beer and double up on water, which is always a better option anyway, just in case. Man, I do love a party that turns into an after, after, after

Hey thanks man ! Great post !! Just makes so much sense. I am going to give your theory a whirl right now. I have had a few beers under my belt. I am trying Redbull with Bacardi now. I’ll remember your post and drink really, really slowly. Let’s see how that goes.

Alcohol by far is one of the most boring drugs man has ever known and it seems that our consumption habits are totally defined by our culture and by the greed of companies that produce liquor of all sorts. In drinking cultures getting sick the next morning is like becoming a local hero and no one usually asks themselves why one drinks in first place….

Don’t want a hangover? Number one: EAT Number two: drink top quality liquor preferably and anjeo tequila thats an aged tequila ,or high end beer preferably “Guiness” . Number three: Eat again Number four: when you get done drinking alcohol, drink water lots and lots of water Number five: wake up drink water Number six: nap – wake up drink water

[…] The Beer Then Liquor Rule—Explained | The Drunk PirateOct 6, 2008 … You’ve all head it, or variations of it, before: “Beer then liquor, never been sicker. Liquor then beer, have no fear.” This boys and girls is the … […]