The Toll of Caring for Dementia

This noble undertaking can stretch the caregiver’s limits and takes a significant toll, both emotionally and physically. Therefore, learning to recognize the signs of caregiver burnout are important.

When caring for a spouse with Alzheimer’s or dementia, caregivers are commonly impacted by the following:

Stress: There’s no way around it; caregiving is stressful. Family caregivers of loved ones with a dementia report significant levels of stress. Managing all aspects of a household without help while simultaneously shouldering the burden of full-time caregiving is grueling. What’s more, spousal caregivers are usually seniors themselves, so they often have to face the most difficult challenge of their life while experiencing their own age-related health problems.

Depression: Watching someone close to you slowly slip away is deeply saddening. This sadness often comes from a feeling of loss —the loss of your marriage as you knew it, the loss of happier days, the loss of leisure time. It’s normal to be sad in these circumstances, but too often this sadness becomes clinical depression, which impairs the ability to function normally and can cause people to “let themselves go.”

Financial Problems: Full-time caregiving and a day job usually aren’t compatible. Spousal caregivers who work often have to give up employment and retire early. Furthermore, the cost of paid care, which often becomes necessary, can wreak financial havoc.

It’s important to recognize that these four areas of impact are interconnected. For instance, stress and depression can provoke health problems, and vice versa.

Working to mitigate negative impacts in one of these areas will be beneficial in other areas.

Caring for Yourself: Crucial When You’re a Caregiver

There are certainly positive aspects of caregiving too, such as the satisfaction we get from helping someone who we love very much, but it’s clear that family caregivers, particularly caregiving spouses, frequently sacrifice their own physical and mental wellbeing for their loved one.

When they try to do too much, or to do everything, they are inviting what the caregiving community calls “caregiver burnout.” Spousal caregivers should recognize that by taking care of themselves and keeping well, they will be better caregivers for their loved ones.

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About the Author

Dana Larsen is a writer, artist, editor, dancer and food-enthusiast living in the Pacific Northwest. Originally from Alaska, Dana has a passion for the outdoors and finding life’s next adventure. She graduated with honors from the University of Washington with a degree in English and Communications, and her writing has appeared in a variety of digital and print publications. She loves connecting audiences with ideas and is also an advocate for enhancing care and support for those affected by Alzheimer’s and other dementias. View Dana's Google Profile.

Please share your thoughts or comments on this article:

Margie Frazer

Thanks for listing the 4 biggest difficulties of being a spousal caregiver. Just wish the article could have elaborated on how to overcome them. The old “take care of yourself” advice is kind of shallow when there are so few ways to actually do that.

Germaine Clemente

I care for my 90 year old mom 24/7 with Alzheimer’s dementia and I’m exhausted. I use to be a happy full of energy person and now I’m tired all the time. The questions mom always asks is she wants to go home and see her parents and always looking for things plus she has a bad back and can hardly walk. Most places are not affordable and if they are the care is horrible. I’m at wits end

Myrna Torres Fuchs

No kidding!! As much as I hate the nursing home + would rather keep him home, it’s truly demanding, stressful with my poor husband shouting + calling me every 2 minutes. The last time he was home, I didn’t realized how sick I was getting. I see him everyday + i still feel stress out. God Bless everyone that can handle their love ones.

Anna Rhodes

my spouse has dementia his son moved in I am glad he did. We
we would never put him in a home. Unless he be comes out of hand.
he is 67 he’s a vet he some times sleeps all day. It’s hard to get him to eat.
We get him stuff we think he like to eat. We found that he has a cancer on his kiddi

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