Look, I usually take my mother’s crazy antics in stride but when she attacks my character and calls me spoiled? That’s just not acceptable, especially since I am not spoiled! I’m just a product of my environment and really, how can that be my fault?

Just the other day, for example, I went to my friend’s 1st birthday party and not only did she have Build-A-Bear set up a little bear-making factory at her house but she had a woman in a bubble in the middle of the pool!

Woman. In. A. Bubble.

Of course now I want the same thing at my next party, but when I asked my mom and she said, “We’ll see.”

I’m old enough to know this means there will be no bubble woman. Instead I’m sure we’ll just have the same faulty pinata that we’ve had the last 6 years – the one we have to beat to death to open up. My mom can be really cheap sometimes.

Build-a-Bear. Too cute.

Anyway back to the Uggs: they aren’t even that extraordinary, especially since this girl at my school wears Louis Vuitton sneakers every day! I freak out a little bit every time I see her wielding a paintbrush in art because I have a feeling that no amount of Oxi Clean can get red paint out of a pair of leather Louis.

In any case you’d better believe I’ll be scouring eBay listings to make sure that my Uggs aren’t for sale. I’m pretty sure that in the past my mom sold some of the other stuff that’s mysteriously disappeared from my closet. She denies it but I know better. Let’s just say my mom’s first pair of Tory Burch shoes coincided with my first pair disappearing.

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The bubble woman is insane. You must live in a very posh part of town,

Side note, im in love with the dress your wearing!

I know this may be semi rude to ask (maybe) but ive been reading your blog from the begining and find you to be so inspirational. I recently caught the blogging bug and started my own. Except… i have no readers. Id feel honored if you would maybe give my lil blog a shot out on one of your posts? If not i understand, but it never hearts to ask right??

Well Maya, it seems you have a little resolution to be doing with the whoel Uggs-Mom-won’t-buy-me-any thing.

I guess the question to ask yourself is this: if you freak out watching the girl in school with paint in art class, how will you be feeling if you’re wearing your Uggs and some paint ACTUALLY falls on them? Dunno about you but I certainly wouldn’t be having any of that …..

One more thing – the woman in the bubble – did anyone try getting her out of there? Something about animals and cages comes to mind ….

omg a bubble woman? who thinks of these things?? that’s the new entertainment at children’s parties you must now live up to? insane!
As always you have made me laugh hard this morning.
Maya, your mother does a lot for you, save fighting back for when you’re 16, your mom needs a few more years of “sneakiness” 😉

the bubble woman reminds me of an episode of America’s next top model where the models had to walk the runway in one, over a pool. was it filmed at this house, by chance?! haha. thanks for the guest post maya, way to stick up for yourself. gorgeous fam photo, love both your dresses!

Maya, I think you mom needs to be grounded. Send her to London, its cold here. I’ll take your mom to harrods where she can see children that are way more spoiled than the girl with the LV shoes! Once you mom is thoroughly upset, I will take her for lunch at Fortnums. That should teach her!
*kisses*

They even MAKE LV sneakers for kids? Um…that’s just wrong. Even if I was bleeding money, my child would be wearing light-up pumas…ok I lie, if I have a daughter she would absolutely be in Tory Burch flats…but not LV sneakers…plus sneakers made my Louis or Gucci or any couturier are just rather tacky in my opinion.

Don’t worry, Maya. You are a very posh, very stylish girl. The girl in a bubble thing…if you’ve already seen it its been done. Im sure you can find an even more over the top decoration for your next party.

If you were smart (which obviously you are), you’d sell your own stuff on Ebay before your mom gets to it…then reinvest in a high-earning dividend yielder. Before long, you’ll be able to afford your own bubble lady or whatever else you might want in the future (AKA college education). Good luck with that.

That gray dress you’re wearing is Gorgeous!!!! What a lovely family photo. Since Maya’s feet are still growing all you have to do is wait a few months and then sell the whole lot. Then it’s happy shopping to you.

That bubble woman kind of freaked me out. My kid’s birthday celebrations are always as follows: let him pick 2 friends, take all 3 kids to the cheap movie, let them eat whatever they want, give the extra 2 kids back to their parents. See–you could be doing so much worse!

All I can say is Maya is quite the writer. I can see where all of that “no longer needed” homework help has paid off. Good Mom! Even if you don’t get her the bubble woman for her next birthday party. [because that’s just ridiculous!]

LV shoes for kids? Sounds like Maya goes to my old school in Bahrain! No joke I saw a middle schooler toting around a LV hold all as her book bag last time I went back to visit – ridiculous does not even begin to explain.
On a side note yours and Maya’s dresses are so pretty! I can tell she’s a budding fashionista like her mama. 🙂

One day when Maya is older she will look back and wonder why in the world you let her wear uggs even if it’s because she wanted to at the time. But speaking of spoiled, I saw a guy that must have been about 16 or 17 driving a Rolls Royce Ghost. Now THAT is spoiled, kind of wanted to key his car (kidding..maybe).

I’m more surprised that a woman in a bubble would be required for a child’s 1st birthday party. Aren’t one-year-olds more interested in grabbing their own toes and trying to shove them in their mouth? Great guest post!

Maya – you are just as adorable as your mother. I have a few comments: 1) where the hell does one find a girl in a bubble? does she get referrals?; 2) LV SHOES FOR A CHILD? I refuse to believe those are cute; 3) I love that dress – could your family get any cuter?

This guest post is awesome, she has got your genes in terms of being funny (read: saracastic) !! The bubble woman is ridiculous!!
And amazing family pic you guys!! You have got good looking family including yourself!

Ummm . . . a woman in a bubble. In the pool. I dont even know what to say. Same goes for the Louis Vuitton sneakers. What child needs those? My kids are so screwed. I dont care if they’re wearing $3 from Walmart as long as theyre dressed. 🙂

Tell your mother to put LV sneakers in the next pinata. Or, if you want something that may work tell her you’ll forego a party for something you really want. My boys did this and I was so relieved not to have to deal with their “friends” that I would’ve done almost anything. You’re a really good writer Maya, you’ve come a long way from the sidewalk chalk your mom was freaking out over.

Woman in a bubble? I just don’t get it. Was she dancing or doing something interesting in there? Because, otherwise, what is the freaking point? And it totally doesn’t fit with the build-a-bear theme…sheeesh….

Beautiful photo.. and I can only imagine how tough it would be to raise a child (or yourself in case of Maya :)) in LA, another reason to change coasts… too cold in NY for outside woman in a bubble parties,

You should bring Maya to one of my bday parties. Then she’ll really know how good she has it 😛
And is it wrong that upon seeing the woman in the bubble, I wanted to somehow pop that bubble? Well, for her sake of course, not b/c I’m an immature brat 😉

I’ve been dealing with email purgatory – 1000’s of them – but I had to get caught up on your blog. I vowed not to comment until the end, but when I saw you in looking absolutely gorgeous in this dress I had to comment. (will ignore woman in pool as tempting as that is for satire….)

WowWowWowWOWWOW (and I ain’t whistlin’ World of Warcraft, either).

repeat 10x.

Sorry btw for silence. Mom was at Cedars. Car is in shop 10 days (I think BH BMW is trying to force me to buy a new car.) Eurozone crisis. Fixed income instruments maturing. Yikes!