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Sunday, 5 October 2008

Journey to the bottom of the freezer

.You know how you get days when something snaps and you look at a job you've been meaning to do for, er, months and think, "Today's the day!"

Well, today was one of those days. The day when I would chip away at the ice around the top of the freezer so the lid would fit properly again. Ten minutes, I told myself, and I could reward myself with a mug of tea.

Yes.

Only, it's just so satisfying when you ease a whole chunk away from the side, isn't it? So I fetched the sledge-hammer and chipped away some more. And then the basket was in the way, but when I tried to move it, it was actually frozen in, so... you get the picture.By the time I'd finished the sink looked like this.

And under the basket ...

Suffice to say that I decided I no longer needed beetroot from 1994, tomatoes from 1992 or turkey gravy from 1991.And look - I found the bottom of the freezer!

Seeing that has made me realise how glad I am that my freezer is frost-free. (I was going to say that otherwise I'd lose my posh choc ices. But they don't stay in the freezer long enough - not when my daughter's around!)

The oven, however... is something that had to be tackled yesterday. Lakeland's oven cleaner is wonderful and takes most of the hassle (and fumes) out of it. But even so: not a nice job.

I think there might be a very large trout at the bottom of my chest freezer. If it's not there I can't imagine where I put it. I don't bother about de-icing, my resident control freak does it for me when the freezer won't shut, as he does the oven and occasionally the kitchen floor. My own control freakery takes many other forms, one of which is screaming abuse at any man (only one here) who leaves the loo seat up. Or putting the tea caddy in the wrong place; important stuff like that.

Found the trout, thank goodness; it was hiding under a couple of kilos of white currants we froze three years ago while wondering what to do with them. Also on top was a bag of sloes from about the same time, waiting for me to make sloe gin.

People to lunch tomorrow, I think they'll be delighted to have trout. They needn't know how old it is...

Hah! I've just invested in a new freezer. The previous one was only 25 years old but it had an iceberg tendency too, possibly because the door seal was moody.Have to admit the new one works a lot better and I must be saving the environment, the world, the universe.Good luck with the talk.