Christine,you might check the Employment Wanted or Position Wanted sections of your local papers to see if you can find an independent with suitable references and qualifications. You might look in elderly care, as the confusion and other issues you are dealing with are similar. An independent would likely get you a lower rate, but you would need to consider insurance and other issues that an agency would take care of. Your county social services department might have programs or at least ideas. A minister or rabbi might be useful. Maybe the local American Cancer society? Thoughts are with you.Maria

No matter where you find the help please be very careful. If someone is coming into your home, remember they are a stranger! I dont want to make you worry about anything else but this is an area where you cant be too careful.

My former job was with the phone company and believe it or not Ive seen $500+ home phone bills. Seems like some aides will accept collect calls, do *69, and make long distance phone calls while they should be caring for your loved one. Of course just about everyone now has cell phones and unlimited everything. You still need to use caution. Think of your cable, they can rent movies right from most cable boxes. This is something else that can get run up rather quickly. By the time you get the bills, the aide will be long gone. Your home could be robbed. Your husband may not be cared for. References can be too easily faked. There are so many bad people who are looking to take advantage of others.

Going thru an agency is better than hiring someone you do not know. I like Maria's idea of asking at the church. There may be some people who wouldnt mind coming one day per week and lending a hand. Maybe friends or relatives know someone in the medical field who would help you. Word of mouth is usually a good way to get someone reliable.