vaya con pance

I never thought I would have to say this… but, er, the time has come for me to go where GoGoPance cannot follow. This saddens me. I don’t even know what it’s LIKE to travel without ending each day with a regurgitative brain dump of fun stories, photos and literary musings; to end a day of adventure without validating it with witty prose.

Alas, never fear WebWatchers! I plan to take copious notes (ya know – notes on paper, written with a pen), so upon return I can recap on GGP accordingly; day by day, photo by photo.

This Thursday I am bound for Zurich, Switzerland (via Istanbul, Turkey) for a five day biking tour through the Swiss Alps. Crraaaazy! I will be carrying everything on my back – mostly because it sounds (and will look in pictures) pretty badass and we don’t really want to deal with pre-organizing luggage transfer services. We will be free to ride however long we want every day, landing for overnights wherever we find vacancy. It is for this reason my computer is not getting packed. I simply do not want to carry its weight when I have other things of more importance to consider, like, clean underwear, toothpaste and snacks. And to help save a little fundage I might also try to BYOHelmet overseas. We’ll see.

We start off in Burgdorf and will end in Interlaken, averaging 25-30 miles a day on a combination of at least three different routes: The Herzroute, The Lakes Route and The Bernese Oberland Route. Switzerland’s map o’ bike trails:

We have rented e-bikes which have an extra boost of battery power for those not-so-flat alpine mountain passes. Now, this may sound a little wussy to you (it sure does to me as I picture myself sitting upright and buzzing cheerily past people actually making an effort), but I assure you I have read up on the electric bike phenomenon and they do not work unless you are also pedaling. My cycle pride can stay intact. Example of the sites and the ride below:

GoGoPance will return in early June. Until then, maybe watch “The Sound of Music” for entertainment and picture me spinning around on grassy hilltops yodeling with goats. OH! I think I still have time to make some biking pants out of curtains… hmmmmm.

I’ve been a little MIA. When one’s hobby suddenly turns into one’s livelihood, the energy and creativity needed to enact said hobby poofs into thin air. So writing for pleasure lately has become something that only happens in my brain. I write all KINDS of fascinating GGP sh*t in my head. But my fingers have just plum run out of spots on the keyboard dance card.

Things I think to blog about as I go through my day are mundane, fleeting and, usually, downright silly.

Like. I own grown-up Monday, Wednesday and Friday underwear – drawers that actually say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday on them. The Wednesday ones are labeled “Workout Wednesday” and come complete with little black dumbbells. So every Wednesday I am compelled to dig through my dresser and put them on when I go to the gym. Why should you know this? I have no idea. And don’t bother to wonder what Monday’s and Friday’s alliterative undies might dictate, or what happened to Tuesdays and Thursdays for that matter, because I couldn’t even tell you. Wednesdays are all I care about.

And now that putting gas in a car is a regular chore, I forthelifeofme can’t understand why spurting in those last few drops to round the charge to a figure that doesn’t include pennies, is bad for the environment. Or is that just one of those rumors I missed becoming false because I haven’t had a car in 10 years?

And I love, love, love imitation crabmeat. I want to write a whole post about fake crab in Dr. Seuss speak. Because when I fix and eat it, it’s actually what is running through my thoughts. I love you in a wrap, I love that you don’t crack, I love you in a snap, after a nap or on my lap. What do you think about that?

And now I will go write some corporateblahgittyblah jargon and BILL people for it! Mwah ah ah. Maybe I can afford to buy some new under garments that don’t have words on them soon. It’s really affecting my love life.

Not Pictured: Pance’s Underwear (seriously, what were you expecting?!?)