New Delhi. Encouraged by the dire predictions of exit polls, retired members of the NAC have drafted a Minority Government Bill that the UPA Government plans to table in Parliament before counting begins at 8 AM on May 16. If passed, this will enable the President to invite the party with the fewest seats to form the Government.

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“Today is a red letter day for the secularist ethos of India,” gushed Aruna Roy, “For the first time since the Greeks, majoritarianism will be defeated! We will have the legislative arsenal to defeat communal forces.”

“The people have spoken! By giving us the lowest number of votes, they have identified us as the undisputed minority party. We promise to not let down all the people who didn’t vote for us,” he said.

But he cautioned, “We don’t want to get too ahead of ourselves. Let the counting begin. President Mukherjee has hinted that he will require letters of non-support from all allies before we can stake a claim to form the Government.”

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AAP has also submitted an addendum to the Bill – in case of a tie between 2 minority parties, the one whose leader lost the deposit by the largest margin would be invited to form the Government.

When asked about the first act that they would implement if they formed the Government, Kejriwal said that he planned to introduce the much delayed June Lokpal Bill.

Sources in Lutyens have confirmed that a pre-counting agreement has been arrived at between AAP and Congress. In a worst case scenario where AAP gets 1 seat and ends up not being the single smallest minority, Congress has promised to withdraw support from the outside.