Pages

A blog about my life, fitness and fun! (...and maybe a few cat pictures...)

Sunday, November 20, 2016

How I'm feeling. (This is NOT NORMAL)

**Note: As I said before, I will continue to talk about what's going on in our country. I have so much to say and honestly am having trouble bringing everything together into coherent thoughts and posts. This is not going to become a "politics" blog but it is something I care deeply about, so I will be talking about it from time to time. Writing about it helps my process everything, and talking about it makes us understand each other better.**

The results of last week's election has me down. Like, really down in a way I didn't anticipate.I am not surprised Hillary lost. I wasnever convinced she was going to win... not because I doubted her ability but because I rarely let myself get too excited about anything because I fear being disappointed.What I am surprised about is how bad a Trump win has made me feel. I knew I would feel bad if it happened, I just didn't know I would feel like I was mourning a death. The only time I felt the feelings I felt this past week was when someone close to me has actually died. Some of you probably think that is overly dramatic and some of you probably know exactly how I feel. It's all good.The reason I feel this way is because I deeply care for our country and the people in it. I care about the safety and rights of every American. Sometimes I wish I didn't care. It would be easy not to care... then I wouldn't feel any pain. But no, we must care.George Takei wrote a piece, and I found this paragraph relevant to how I am feeling:

"We are upset because we love our family and friends but can’t understand how some of them voted as they did. But there again, only those truly close to us can cause us so much pain. These painful feelings, once examined, stem not from a place of darkness, but rather from a place of hope. It is precisely because we care so much that we mourn this loss so deeply. If we did not care about our country, our friends and family, our values, we could shrug our shoulders and simply move on. The fact that we do not speaks volume of our commitment, our principles and yes, our patriotism."

I haven't been sad for Hillary yet. My sadness is more toward the direction our country is now heading. I do feel compassion for Hillary, but deep down I know she will be fine. She is no doubt heartbroken over the results... but that woman is a fighter. She recently made her first public appearance since her concession speech and she spoke about how this election was bigger than her, and that's the way I see it too. That's why it's so hard.That being said, the darkness I felt last week has been lifted a little. Last week, all I could think about was the election. It's still heavy on my mind, but there are times I don't think about it and things start to feel relatively normal.But that concerns me. The normalization of Trump being president. This is not normal. He is not normal. We have to keep reminding ourselves this. It shouldn't be something that consumes us, but it needs to be talked about. I feel like at this point, a lot of people are immune to his outrageous language and ideas. We cannot become immune or complacent. Let's not rehash his behavior on the campaign trail, and in the spirit of "give the guy a chance", let's instead take a look at some of his decisions and ideas he has made so far as president elect... these NOT NORMAL things.1. He appointed white nationalist (which come on, is just a nice word for racist) Steve Bannon as senior adviser. (source)2. The "blind trust" that will be running his business while he is president will be led by his three oldest children. (source)3. He has expressed a desire to stay in the White House during the week but spend weekends at his apartment in NYC, Mar-a-Lago, or his NJ golf course. (source)These things are NOT NORMAL. And I really don't think that is a partisan opinion. Call me out if you think it is.

(There are many sources for the three things I listed. I provided one source for each. I urge you to Google and find more sources if you are skeptical. And I urge you to be skeptical- I am a bat shit crazy liberal running blogger and you should verify anything I state as fact!)

I'm not sure how to wrap this up. I guess my three main points are:

1. Last week I felt horrible.

2. This week I feel a little more normal.

3. We need to keep talking and holding Donald Trump accountable for the decisions and ideas we disagree with... whether we voted for him or not!

4. This is NOT NORMAL.

Besides just talking, I plan on DOING! This is my first step. I am setting an alarm on my phone so that I am reminded to do this every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. This Google Doc is very helpful and provides you with all the phone numbers you need! Will you do this with me???

I can't view the calling sheet but I think this is a good idea. I went to a Pantsuit Nation Charleston meetup yesterday and suggested that we do a weekly call, if everyone in that group made one call per week maybe we could accomplish something and it would be a very small amount of time out of our days.

A big reason for my emotional breakdown on Thursday was the election, not my injury. The news is so depressing and hard to get away from in a gym full of TVs and that's where I'd just left!

I fixed it, thank you for letting me know because that Call Sheet is freaking awesome! I have heard that reps are getting tons of calls already. We have to KEEP speaking up to them. I agree, it doesn't take long at all. I could call on my way home from work, easy peasy.

I have not been able to watch TV stuff in regards to the election. A gym full of TVs would have led me to a breakdown too! I will be hitting up the gym today but I will hide in my little world of Survivor podcasts.

This "We're His Problem Now" Calling Sheet idea is great. You are right Megs, we can't just accept the outcome and be complaisant about it. I plan on participating and making calls. I work from home, so I'll be able to make calls while working.

I'm going to call with my cell phone AND my land-line. I also plan on using different voices and accents, just to make it fun :)

I think I went into denial for a few days and felt "better" and then this week it hit me all over again. I've been depressed; I have no energy or motivation, I feel like I'm totally just going through the motions, I'm moody, etc. And yes, it's mostly thinking about where our country is heading and how people can't seem to agree on the best way to be on the offensive. Do we call people out, or does that make them shut down? Do we "wait and see", or does that empower our oppressors?

Intellectually I know I should be terrified of Bannon in the WH, but I'm more annoyed and pissed than anything else because I'm having trouble truly believing the worst will happen.

But this is why I still can't forgive family members who voted DT. They've put their family in danger and don't even seem to care.

I love that call sheet. I'm also going to be participating in the postcard avalanche...I'll invite you!

I still think back at Trumps behavior during the entire time leading to the election and it still makes me feel sick to think he is the President. Sick.

But, this whole even is pushing me to be more involved, more aware, and feistier. I feel myself not tolerating things that in the past I would have let slide. I saw a tweet that said "if you thought I was a crazy liberal feminist, get ready for me in the next 4 years." That sums me up, I will speak up more than ever!

I feel exactly like you and I am glad you'll keep talking about it... because I think I have to talk about it too. We can't go back to normal because this is NOT normal.... all the things Trump is doing raises a lot of red flags and I just hope that people are there to hold him accountable. So much of this transition is unchartered territory and unfortuantely I believe that he'll use his position for his personal advantage (and that thoughts sickens me). I still wake up with a pit in my stomach every morning and while I don't enjoy the feeling, I hope it won't go away for a while... because it will remind me of what's at stake.

I am so worried because the only people who will hold him accountable are the house/senate... but those are majority republicans! I called the numbers on the call sheet today- house oversight committee and Pat Toomey's office (my senator who has yet to denounce trump) and all mailboxes are full so I could not leave messages... which I guess is a good thing because that means a lot of people are calling. But seriously, I think the only people stopping trump are our elected officials so we have to hold them accountable. Sorry you feel as horrible as I do. A lot of people do I suppose. I will keep talking about this, I promise!