Review: ‘THERAPY FOR A VAMPIRE’ is a glorious romp with bite.

How long do you have to be a couple in order to know everything about the other person? A few months? A few years? Does your lover leave their socks on the bedroom floor instead of putting them in the hamper? Do they slurp their soup, even in public. Is their neediness just too much to bear sometimes? How long is too long to have to endure these annoying habits? In the new festival favorite finally coming to theaters, THERAPY FOR A VAMPIRE, 500 years is enough.

Running Time: 87 minutes

Vienna, 1932. Count von Közsnöm (Tobias Moretti) has lost his thirst for life, and his eternally long marriage to Countess Gräfin Elsa von Közsnöm (Jeanette Hain) cooled centuries ago. Fortunately, Sigmund Freud (Karl Fischer), with his innovative new approach to solving life’s existential problems, is accepting new patients. During their strictly nocturnal sessions, the good doctor suggests the Count appease his vain wife, desperate to see her own reflection, by commissioning a portrait of her by his assistant, Viktor (Dominic Oley), an aspiring painter. But it’s Viktor’s headstrong girlfriend Lucy (Cornelia Ivancan) who most intrigues the Count, convinced she’s the reincarnation of his one true love. Soon, the whole crowd is a hilarious mess of mistaken identities and misplaced affections in this send -up of the vampire genre, proving once and for all that 500 years of marriage is enough.

Writer/Director David Ruehm‘s script could not be funnier. The dialogue is filled to the brim with clever double entendre. Using Freud as a go-between was a massively ingenious choice, using his dream analysis and general beliefs as a backdrop for a film that is, in all accounts, about relationships and their deeper meaning. The story is a fantastical cat and mouse game, centered around longing, jealousy, boredom, and vanity. There is not a loose end when it comes to performances. For a brief moment, I tried to imagine an American version of this film and could not think of any other actors that would have done the roles justice. Tobias Moretti, as the Count, might very well be an actual vampire for all I know. His natural comic timing is a pure delight to watch. Jeanette Hain, as the Countess, is seductive and a sheer wonder to behold on-screen. Cornelia Ivancan, as Lucy, is effortless in her 1930’s ingenue look and quirkiness. Dominic Oley‘s portrayal of Viktor is dashing and adorable all in one, as a man who idolizes his restless lover. Karl Fischer, as Dr. Freud, is genuinely funny and endearing. The cast’s chemistry is immaculate from end to end. The cinematography from Austria’s preeminent DP Martin Gschlacht (Goodnight Mommy, Oscar-nominated Revanche) is splendid. The sets are meticulous and the costuming is both period appropriate and completely innovative. I have nothing but absolute love for this film. If Wes Andserson ever made a vampire rom-com, THERAPY FOR A VAMPIRE might look something like the final product. The film has been making the rounds at film festivals for quite some time, and racking up awards as a result. No matter the state of your relationship, everyone, (living or undead) will relate to how the comedy plays out on-screen. The film is nothing short of brilliant.

About Liz Whittemore

Liz grew up in northern Connecticut and was memorizing movie dialogue from Shirley Temple to A Nightmare on Elm Street at a very early age. She will watch just about any film all the way through (no matter how bad) just to prove a point. A loyal New Englander, a lover of Hollywood, and true inhabitant of The Big Apple.