[sarcasm] Carpooling to Washington D.C....

Derek Tonn

Posted 04 December 2008 - 04:43 PM

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[sarcasm] Nat Case and I are carpooling out to Washington D.C. (leaving our corporate jets in their hangars) to testify before Congress as to why they should give the mapping industry, and our firms in particular, a few billion dollar bail-out. We'll likely swing through Chicago and pick up Dennis McClendon along the way...using Google Maps and Garmin to help us determine shortest-routes, in effort to show our sensitivity to financial efficiency during these difficult economic times. Anyone else want us to pick you up on the way...to see if you can get $10-$20 billion for your firm as well? Just let us know...although you'll be expected to chip-in for gas money along the way.

Rob

Posted 04 December 2008 - 08:37 PM

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[sarcasm] Nat Case and I are carpooling out to Washington D.C. (leaving our corporate jets in their hangars) to testify before Congress as to why they should give the mapping industry, and our firms in particular, a few billion dollar bail-out. We'll likely swing through Chicago and pick up Dennis McClendon along the way...using Google Maps and Garmin to help us determine shortest-routes, in effort to show our sensitivity to financial efficiency during these difficult economic times. Anyone else want us to pick you up on the way...to see if you can get $10-$20 billion for your firm as well? Just let us know...although you'll be expected to chip-in for gas money along the way.

Derek Tonn

Posted 05 December 2008 - 02:54 AM

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Hugo,

I think it's one of those situations where you have to laugh...so you don't cry and/or go on an "Incredible Hulk" rage against all the stupidity, selfishness and short-sightedness that contributed to (and resulted in) the bad, BAD economic situation we're all in right now.

Business is actually pretty good here at our firm right now, all things considered! However, stupidity and selfishness by others is going to cost me and my family THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of dollars over the next few years...and that makes me angry. REALLY angry. If I'm not laughing, I'm angry. So, I choose to laugh. It's not making light of the situation or trying to show disrespect. It's a coping mechanism for me, who doesn't have a check magically arriving in my inbox/mailbox every 2-4 weeks...no more, no less. We're in better shape than most firms I've talked with and we'll be fine riding out the recession...but it STILL makes me very, very angry.

So....we've got Rob marked down for a $5 billion hand-out, with Nat, Dennis and I asking for a mere $8 billion each. Anyone else need any money? The US Dollar isn't quite on-par with the peso as of yet...so crank up those printing presses...

I think it should be... certain Dutch banks *cough*ING*cough* are now actually advertising in foreign markets using slogans like "backed by the Dutch government"... yeah... backed by my tax euro's...

A couple of financial institutions have applied for, and received, large bailouts from the government, including one that publicly stated: "We're doing fine, but we can always use more money"... Well gee, I could always use some more money.

So what's our government doing for small businesses? Well... not a whole lot it seems. Our prime minister has announced, 2 weeks ago, that we could write off investments in a shorter amount of time than before and that the government itself will start paying its bills on time... Thanks for publicly announcing that's currently not the case (I have to be honest, the majority of my government clients are paying on time, within the 30-day payment term I have to give them by law).

Things are still going well here, though I am noticing that some of my clients are taking a rather relaxed approach to paying... Fortunately my income is divided between both software sales and billable hours (consultancy, training, production)

I am glad I didn't park my money in Iceland, despite the high interest rate (5%) they were offering a mere 9 months ago.

Derek Tonn

Posted 05 December 2008 - 01:44 PM

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Sure thing, Hans....as long as you agree to leave the corporate jet and/or corporate yacht back home, I'm sure Congress can find a few billion for you too. Maybe even payable in Euros...since dollars are about to become the equivalent of toilet paper.

If you can find your way to the Quiznos in Alexandria, VA, we'll pick you up there. Say...around 3pm-ish?!

Hans van der Maarel

Posted 05 December 2008 - 02:11 PM

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Sure thing, Hans....as long as you agree to leave the corporate jet and/or corporate yacht back home, I'm sure Congress can find a few billion for you too. Maybe even payable in Euros...since dollars are about to become the equivalent of toilet paper.

If you can find your way to the Quiznos in Alexandria, VA, we'll pick you up there. Say...around 3pm-ish?!

I'll be there!

Funny enough, the US$ has become a lot more valuable over the past 4-5 months. Since I pay for some of the products that I resell in US$, this has caused me to raise my prices. Also, my US trip of October became quite a bit more expensive all of a sudden...

On the other hand, gas prices have dropped significantly, by about 35%, in the same period. From 1.70 euros per liter to 1.26

Derek Tonn

Posted 05 December 2008 - 02:17 PM

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Okay...Dennis gets his bail-out cash first......since Nat ($20), me ($6), Greg ($9) and Hans ($30 Euros) did better than a George Washington this year. Jean-Louis: we'll have to send Nat's corporate jet out to Washington State to pick you up, since our Ford Festiva rental is already nearing the Virginia State line (en route to pick up Hans). Just keep that on the down-low though...between us....otherwise Congress might frown on giving us all a little cash.

Jean-Louis

Posted 05 December 2008 - 03:41 PM

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I suggest we setup some press releases with frightening predictions that the collapse of the map industry is imminent. Throngs of lost souls will be wandering around aimlessly. Geographical knowledge, Sense of place, Patriotism, Road safety, Border control, indeed the entire civic glue that holds the body politik together will implode. This wont be like the Great Depression...Failure to bail our industry will be nothing short of going back to the DARK AGES. It took 8 centuries to recuperate when the Romans stopped drawing their maps.

Thank you all for this thread - it made me laugh out loud in my office!

Perhaps to 'solve' the US's border control fears they should take some lessons from the book How to Lie with Maps and just re-draw all maps with the US border drawn farther south. Then, immigrants from the south would become confused and end up finding jobs in northern Mexico instead of the southern US, no? Solved.

If all maps and gps units ceased to work, we'd have geocachers aimlessly wandering around the woods looking for trinkets, tourists lost driving around DC (constantly looping between the mall and Memorial Bridge), no one could escape the French Quarter in New Orleans, and 'laypeople' would become worse at saying, 'we're going up there for the weekend' instead of 'down there'. People may never find out exactly where Alaska and Hawaii are really located. Only the square Midwesterners would be able to live without geographic anxiety.

On the other hand, compass and sundial sales may increase.

I'm in Savannah, GA if you can swing by a pick me up for a bailout too, I appreciate it!I'll be modest and only ask for 50 million.

Aurora Maps and Media

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Social Media: Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest @auroramapsmedia

"It's risky to travel into the unknown; you don't know what you'll find.
But it's equally risky to dream, and not dive in."

MapMedia

Posted 13 December 2008 - 05:43 PM

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Is this offer open to non-US citizens too?

[momentarily ends sarcasm] Yes, the US govt. doesn't have any allegiance to any country, only money, so if you can invade D.C. with an army of lobbyists I am sure you will get what you are after: money, arms, or laws in your favor. [reconvenes sarcasm]

Jean-Louis

Posted 17 December 2008 - 12:50 PM

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Is this offer open to non-US citizens too?

[momentarily ends sarcasm] Yes, the US govt. doesn't have any allegiance to any country, only money, so if you can invade D.C. with an army of lobbyists I am sure you will get what you are after: money, arms, or laws in your favor. [reconvenes sarcasm]

Oh yea.... Try to get the US govt to buy the slightest little piece of honest mapwork and see what happens when they find a Canadian address anywhere on your stationery!