My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Once again it is Saturday night and I am going to the Escape to spend times with my friends. I always look forward to the time I spend with my friends and I am really looking forward to Diva Las Vegas which is weeks away. I will get 12 days living full time as Susan and of course I will be able to get long pretty acrylic nails for the trip. I started getting ready early as my Susan time for the next couple weeks will be limited as I get ready for the trip.

I got to the Escape about 5:30 and I got lucky and found a parking spot, the last one. I got our usual table inside and kearren was already there, it was good to see her again as it has been a while since she has been out with our group. It was good to get a chance to talk with her as we waited for others to show up. Of course, I ordered dinner and the food was good as always. Kate showed up next and the 3 of us talked till Kearren left, she was going to a dance with some of the ladies from the bar. Now of course I had to get a few pictures with Kate, well actually she thought of the pictures. I remember years ago when I was always getting pictures, I must have a couple thousand pictures of Susan on my computer. Now I don’t think about getting pictures and sometimes I regret it so I was happy Kate thought of it. Now it is funny as people always tell me I never take a bad picture, truth is I only post the good ones but tonight I really liked the way my makeup turned.

Cassandra showed up next and we talked a little about Diva Las Vegas and our Mexican cruise. I am really looking forward to both. Diva Las Vegas because it is so close as I said 3 weeks away and there is still time to sign up if you are thinking of going. The Mexican cruise as I have never been on a cruise before but also because I am planning of doing the whole cruise as Susan including flying down and back as Susan plus I will be able to get my nails a little longer for that. For Diva Las Vegas I have to keep them a little shorter so I can hold a golf club. There will be some first on the cruise, not only flying but I will be traveling to another country as Susan.

Michelle also showed up tonight and I can’t remember the last time I saw her out, she is also thinking or going to Diva Las Vegas. She asked if there was still time to sign up. I am hoping she goes. I think we have at least 10 going this year to Diva Las Vegas from our group. Jan and Lynn also showed up along with one other girl so we had a good crowd here tonight.

Now there were a couple ladies here, they were sisters and they came over and started talking with us. They were really nice and I think they wanted to get to know us, not sure if they have ever met a T-girl before. It was fun to talk with them and of course I had to get pictures with them. Now I talked a little with both of them but and it was fun meeting them and getting to know them a little. It is funny as Susan I really love meeting new people, in my male life I am way shyer and tend to stay more to myself so I guess there are differences between Susan and my male side. Now I didn’t get or remember both their names but one was named Natalie and this is a picture of me with her. Karaoke had started so it was loud and was hard to hear.

Now about 10 Kearren came back wit the group that went to the dance and Lorie also showed up so we had 8 of us here tonight. Now there were a couple ladies at the table next to me. They were going outside and asked if I would watch their drinks for them, I said I would. Now when they came back in I got talking to them and they were really nice also. Their names were Nicole and Rachel. I wish I had thought to get pictures with them also. I met some really nice people here tonight and that made the night so much more fun. It was almost 11:30 when I called it a night.

It is Wednesday night and I am going to meet my friends for dinner at McMenamins Tavern & Pool (1716 NW 23rd Ave Portland Or.) for dinner at 7pm. I have been there twice before I think so I am looking forward to it. I got home late so it was a rush to get ready, I figured I would be late but got there about 6:30. I lucked out and found a parking spot about a block away, parking is the only bad thing about this area of Portland. They also have new parking meters here, you enter your license and you don’t have to put a ticket in your car, they will text you a receipt though. I walked the block to McMenamins and really though nothing of it. Kate and Cassandra were already there. Now we weren’t sure how many we would have as the only others we new would be here was Melissa and Barb.

We talked a while as we waited and sure enough about 7 both Melissa and Barb arrived, this would be all we would have tonight for dinner, just the 5 of us. I really don’t mind, if we have a big group it is nice as it is fun to see everyone but small groups are nice as we can all talk with each other. We talked about Diva Las Vegas which is a little over 3 weeks away, wow it has come up so fast. They have the activities signups online now. Cassandra already signed up and I plan to do mine tomorrow, will pick the same thing Cassandra did.

We all ordered dinner and the food here is really good and the staff is awesome. We had a wonderful dinner and great conversation. It was just such a fun night out with friends. We had just finished up eating and Trisha showed up. I think I have met her a couple times before over the years but it has been a while. Trisha was the first-person Cassandra met and it was Trisha that helped Casandra go out for the first time. It really was a fun night but as always it went to fast and soon was almost 10 and time to call it a night.

It is Sunday afternoon and I have some free time well I have some studding to do but I can do that as Susan at Starbuck’s. I was ready a little before 3 and went down the street to the Starbuck’s by my house, they were packed the only open seats were a couple along the window at the counter in the corner or a couple at the big table which had two ladies at, one at each end on the same side so I put my computer in the middle across the table from them and then went and stood in line to get my drink. Now of course I immediately notice the one who was younger in her early 20’s at most had beautiful long red nails. They were both studding and of course I had studding to do but first I had to write my blog from Thursday when I went to the nail salon, I am actually 2 blogs behind, so we really didn’t pay any attention to each other. It was a little after 4 when the one lady left so it was just me and the girl with the pretty red nails. And as I said we really didn’t pay any attention to each other but it was nice to be sitting at a table with other people. She was reading on a tablet and taking notes, okay maybe I did pay a little attention.

Well she went up to get another drink and set her tablet down and I could see it was all about nails. Well she came back to the table and sat down and I don’t know why I asked her what she was studding and she told me she was in beauty school which I kind of already figured out. The next thing I know we were talking about her school and what she liked and didn’t like about beauty school. Any way she introduced herself, her name s Riley. For the next 30 minutes or so we would talk on and off, it was really nice but as all things soon she had to leave and I was back to just focusing on my studding. I finished up on what I had to do and then started working on my blog from Saturday night which was Saint Patrick’s Day. It was ab out 5:45 when my battery on my computer got really low so I moved to a table by the window where I could plug it in, yes by now there were only about 6 other people here. Starbuck’s really is a nice place to go for a few hours and get things done and the fact I can get Susan time just makes it that much better. I have no idea how many times I have gone to Starbuck’s as Susan but I have been going there since at least 2009.

I stayed at Starbuck’s till they closed at 6:30 before leaving. I went to Wendy’s for dinner before heading home.

It is Saturday and our group is once again going to Salem to join the girls down there. I have been there a few times and it is a nice place just such a far drive as it takes me over an hour to get there. Now I was planning on going as I wanted to see some of the girls down there again but as always things come up. I had things to do earlier in the day and they took longer to get done then I planned. It was almost 5 before I started getting ready so it would be a rush. Now I have been getting to the Escape between 5:30 and 6 so going to Salem I would still be there by 7 but not tonight. It was after 6 when I was ready to leave and I was still thinking of going but as I pulled out of the garage I saw my fuel light on as I forgot to fill up so I stopped at Costco to get gas and of course had to wait in line. I filled up and of course I noticed everyone getting gas had on green, that’s right it is Saint Patrick’s Day. Anyway, by now it was almost 6:30 and it would still be an hour to get to Salem and then there was the drive home after people celebrated. I decided to go to the Escape instead and see who showed up there. I got there at 6:45 and went in after a quick selfie in the car.

Now they were not busy so I got our normal table hoping we would have a big group. I then went to the bar to order food, Lindsey was working tonight, she only works when they need extra help so it was great to see her again, really all the girls working here are wonderful. I got back to my table and no more then got my computer out and Kate showed up so I put it away. It was great to see her as I was wondering if I would be the only one tonight. Well we got talking and of course the most important topic came up, nails. Kate actually likes my nails how I have been doing them the last several months, so I explained how I have them done and really it is no different than any other woman other then the acrylic is a lot thinner layer. Kate has had a pedicure before but never had acrylic nails and as I have said I think everyone should try it at least once. I explained about the process and soon I had my computer back out showing her a few videos. I love watching online as I have learned a lot this way. One I really like for learning makeup techniques is Julia Graf, she does an amazing job breaking down different looks. The other if you want to learn about acrylic nails is by Suzie and she shows you the different styles, looks and how to do. You really can learn most anything watching videos on YouTube.

Any way we talked about so many things tonight and of course why we do this and again there really is no easy simple reason other then we enjoy it. The same as anyone else who likes to dress up sometimes we just do it as the opposite gender. By about 7:30 it started to get busy and I mean busy, it was a packed house tonight. Seems everyone is Irish on Saint Patrick’s Day and wants to celebrate. There were a lot of new faces here tonight also. Now of course I had to get a picture with Kate tonight. It still amazes me how often and how many pictures I have of Susan, I can’t remember the last time I took a picture of my male self. I probably have a couple thousand Susan pictures on my computer and maybe 10 of my male self.

Any way I really started my blog all those years ago just as a way for me to document and remember my adventures as Susan, the early ones are pretty simple, pretty much where I went and that was it. Here are a couple early blogs from 2006, including a quick stop at Hooters. I never really thought anyone would find much less want to read about my time as Susan. As I saw people were not only reading it but following it I started to write more and in more detail. It really has been a fun thing to do over the years. Again, I would recommend everyone write down at least the important things in your life so you can remember them and maybe share them. A blog is a great way as you can set it public or private or even have it public but keep some private, opps a little off topic again.

By 8:30 it was packed and standing room only and as it was only Kate and I when a few people asked if they could have the other end of our table we said yes, no sense us taking up a table for 8 when it was just the two of us. Karaoke started about 9:30 and that is when it usually gets loud but with so many people here tonight just talking around you it was loud already. It is amazing how fast the night was going just sitting there talking, this really is the feminine side of me as in my male side I am not really a talker, I don’t sit around and just talk but Susan loves to sit and talk.

Lorie showed up a little before 10, she is our late-night girl. She doesn’t get out till 9:30 or 10 and I assume usually closes the bar. I remember those days for me, I wouldn’t leave the house till it was dark so my neighbors wouldn’t see me, even in the winter when it got dark early I still didn’t go out much before 7 for fear one of my neighbors might look out the window and of course we would stay till the place we went closed. Now I don’t even look outside any more or care what time it is. I know one of my neighbors knows about Susan, she found out back in 2012 and she has had no problem with it, as a matter of fact I ran into her at Starbucks the other day, first time she has seen me up close and talked with me. I don’t know if she has told anyone, I hope not as I really do want to keep this side of me private but I am also not afraid of it anymore and I kind of think most of my neighbors know. As much as I go out and I have seen many of my neighbors outside as I pull out of the garage or drive down the street they at the very least have to wonder. It does make it a lot easier when you lose that fear but as I said I still don’t want people telling others about me but I am not going to stop being me.

Kate, Lorie and I talked some more but it was getting late and I do have to be up early so it was about 10:30 When I went up to pay my bill which was no easy thing to do as there was a huge line, it took me about 15 minutes standing in line. It really was a fun night and a lot of new faces here tonight. It was a small group but so much fun to socialize. It is not about where we go or what we do but the friends you are with. It is funny as I have been going to Bars with friends at least once a week for 10 years now and yet I don’t drink. Now early on I would occasionally order a glass of wine and slowly sip on it all night as I felt I had to but I quickly figured out I needed to be me, be Susan and that means I didn’t need to drink either. I really have met some wonderful people over the years and am lucky to have them as friends.

It is Thursday night and I am going to the nails salon for a pedicure and fill. Now I really don’t need one as both my toes and fingers look great still although my finger nails are getting a little long. This really is the one problem I have with getting my nails done with acrylic. I really could go 3 weeks between fills but they get pretty long by then at least for my male side. Even my pedicure held up well 6 weeks and no chips but it is all about timing. You see 4 weeks from today I will be back at Dream Nails for a pedicure and a full set of long acrylic nails for my trip to Diva Las Vegas. I got home and called Dream nails to get an appointment and Anna could get me in at 5 so I had about 1 ½ hours to get ready.

I took my time getting ready, I really like it more when I am not rushed. I know some people think it is strange to spend that much time getting ready just to go to the nail salon or a few hours at Starbuck’s and even I can’t explain it other than I enjoy it. Now I had my makeup done and still had time so I decided to wear my corset for the evening as I really do like the way it makes my waist look and really it is really comfortable other then in and out of the car and maybe a long drive in the car. I got to Dream nails just before 5 and went in, they were really slow tonight, only 1 lady getting a pedicure so Anna was ready to start. Of course, I had to pick a color for my toes, I went with a purple color this time.

Anna started on my nails and it is such a relaxing feeling to have someone do your nails. As she worked we talked a little. She asked if I wanted the deluxe pedicure tonight which I have done once before, as I said it was slow and Anna said it had been slow all week so I am sure they were looking for more services to do. I think it is that time of year as taxes are do in a couple weeks and also property taxes in a little over a month so people are probably a little tighter with their money. Any way I decided to go for the deluxe pedicure, $20 more but it is really relaxing. The main difference is they use a scented lotion and creams and even sent the water, I went with Lavender. They also put a cream on your leg and then wrap it in a hot towel for a while and also give your foot a paraffin wax treatment to soften your feet plus I think the message your legs and feet longer. Not something I would do all the time as it would get expensive but will probably do again in 4 weeks right before Diva Las Vegas and the same for the Cruise this fall.

As Anna did my nails another lady came in and she also got her nails done and was at the next table to me so we did talk a little about nails. It really is an enjoyable experience. I tell everyone you need to get a pedicure and acrylic nails at least once just to experience it and I got a feeling you will probably do it more often once you try it. Anna did a great job on my nails and soon they were just as pretty but a little shorter. Now it was time for my pedicure.

Kathy was once again doing my pedicure, Anna and Kathy always do a wonderful job as do all the people here and I have had several of them do my nails at one time or another. It is funny as I did come here a few times early on but I have been coming here every 2 to 3 weeks now for 2 years and I will have had acrylic nails now for 11 months although thinner than most woman and of course no pretty colors but they still look great. Now as I said I wore my corset today and sitting at the table getting my nails done was fine but sitting in the pedicure chair was not as comfortable, note to self when getting a pedicure, no corset. Kathy did a wonderful job on my feet and it was so relaxing, the deluxe pedicure is the way to go if you can. Normally it takes about an hour to get my fill and pedicure but it was closer to 1 ½ hours. Now partly because the deluxe pedicure takes longer but I have noticed that if they are busy then tend to rush a little more to get people through and this is just not Dream Nails but all nail salons I have gone to and I have talked to others and they say the same. If you do want to get your nails done my two tips, get an appointment and try to avoid really busy times. It was time for the polish and Kathy put the first coat on and as it dried it last all its shine, to say the least I was not happy at the color I had picked but I figured in 4 weeks I would change it. Kathy put a second coat on and the same and then the top coat. The top coat did put a nice shine on it and to my surprise it really looked great and really shiny, turns out it was a great choice. It was 6:30 when I left the Dream Nails

After my nail appointment went across the street to Starbuck’s as I had about 1 ½ hours till they closed and did some work and caught up on some e-mails. Some of the e-mails were questions I get asked from other transgender and non-transgender and probably the most asked is why I do this. There is no simple answer to this, I have talked with other crossdressers and there is no defining thing or moment in our lives we can point to and say this is it, this is why. We just do. Why do some people like chocolate and others don’t? why do some people like sports and others don’t? why do some men have facial hair and others don’t? why do some woman wear dresses, have long hair or nails and others don’t? In the end it comes down to personal preference and that is it. I am more comfortable this way even though when I am out I really am not thinking about how I am dressed. I really don’t know why, I do know that when I dress I do try to emulate what I find attractive in women. The other thing people think is I must be gay and from what I have learned most (75% or more) are straight males. Their dressing has nothing to do with their sexual attraction. As I said for me I try to emulate what I find attractive and for me that is the female body, shape, form, and look. Hair on a body, arms, chest is not at all attractive and I do everything I can to have a smooth clean body.

The other question is am I going to, or when will I transition an d the answer to that is I am not going to as that is not right for me. Now these are my thoughts and observations on these things and I am by no means an expert so remember that before you tell me I am wrong. Talking with both transsexuals and crossdressers there seems to be some common thing and things that are specific to just one. Both have a need to be feminine (or other sex depending on if you are MTF or FTM). The difference is about your body. Transsexuals need to physically be the other gender, they feel their body is wrong. Crossdressers need to present, be accepted as the other gender. From just looking at them you can’t tell as it is all about how they see themselves.

Now for me yes when I am Susan I would love to have real breast, hips, narrower shoulder, 5 to 7 inches shorter, no bulge between my legs but it is because of how it looks and how people see me, it is not about my body being wrong, it is the outward appearance. When I am not Susan I don’t think about it and is I did have real breast then I would be crossdressing the other way as when I was not Susan I would need to bind them down to hid them. Now I do know some crossdressers that have told me they would love to have breast and they would if they could but again there is that key words, love to have them not they their body is wrong or they are not truly who they are without them. It’s like saying I would love to have a million dollars and doing what I can to get it, verse having to have a million dollar to feel you are complete. The way I look at it is if I won 10 million dollars tomorrow how would my life change. For me I would dress as Susan most of the time, pierce my ears, have long acrylic nails and maybe even grow my hair out, surgery not something I would do. A transsexual the first thing on their list would be surgery. Now this is a simple way of looking at it and there is more to t than this but it is a good start and what I have learned.

Wow got a little off topic but that’s okay. Starbucks was a little slow tonight but a relaxing time while I gave the polish on my toes time to fully dry. After Starbucks I went through the drive thru and then home. It was a relaxing 4 hours.

It is Wednesday and tonight our group is doing dinner at the Rock Bottom Restaurant downtown on Morison Street. I have eaten here a couple times before and it is really good and I was looking forward to it. I got home late so it was a rush to get ready. I was ready by 6 and on my way. I got downtown Portland by 6:30 and drove around a few blocks but didn’t see any parking. It really is luck to find a street parking spot this time of night so I went to the parking garage which is only a block away, just easier. I walked into Rock Bottom at 6:45 and Cassandra was already there waiting for a table, looks like they are busy tonight. Melissa got there a little before 7 and it turned out this is all we would have tonight.

It wasn’t long and we were showed to our table well actually a both. We could have fit one more girl in if one had shown up. We did sit and talk for a little just in case anyone else showed up. We actually had a nice conversation and we talked about nails, family, finances, and several other things it was really enjoyable.

We ordered dinner and we all got different things as we all have our favorites. Mine is their Chicken Fried Chicken which is really good. The staff here was great and our waitress was outstanding. I would defiantly recommend Rock Bottom as a place to go to eat. It is mid-priced $10 to $25 but the food is awesome.

It is amazing how fast the night went by, good food and friends and wonderful conversation. We even talked about Diva Las Vegas and our Mexican Cruise as the 3 of us are going on both. Diva Las Vegas is less than 5 weeks away, wow it got here fast. Our group has done some really fun things over the years and we are always looking for new things to do like our Cruise. I think back to when I first started going out and it was all I could do to walk into a LGBT bar now we go to different restaurants all over the city, I have traveled to Las Vegas several times living as Susan the whole time start to finish and when we got on our cruise Cassandra, Kate, Julie, Melissa and I are all planning on flying down to LA for the cruise and home afterwards as our female selves. Cassandra, Julie and I have already booked our flights and are sitting next to each other. This is going to be so much fun it is the one thing I have wanted to do since the first trip to Las Vegas as Susan.

10 years ago, I would never have thought I would go out shopping by myself, dinner with friends or even to Starbucks as Susan let along living as Susan for 12 days traveling to Las Vegas, checking in and out of hotels and soon flying on an air plane. I have really grown as Susan and it is all because of my wonderful friend well they are more like family. There is still time to sign up for Diva Las Vegas or our Mexican Cruise. Last night at dinner we were all talking about our biggest regrets and I do have a couple but one is I waited so long to accept Susan as part of who I am and going out. I really wish I had started going out when I was in my 20’s as I missed so many adventures. But on the other side had I started going out then I may never have met the friends I have now and that would have been a huge loss as they are all a big part of my life. It really is fun to look back over my blog and see some of the things I have done.

Thanks for reading and be sure and keep up with what’s new in Susan’s life on my most recent blog.

Well it is a beautiful warm sunny Sunday afternoon and I had some free time and needed to finish up on my Studying and what better way than as Susan. I was ready by 3 and wore my black skirt and my ankle boots, kind of a dressy casual look. I got to Starbucks about 3:30 and went in and sat at the big table as it was too bright and hot with the sun coming through the windows to sit right there.

I spent about an hour in a half doing my studying before taking a break to write my blog. It really was a relaxing afternoon and I got a lot done. I finished my blog a little after 6 and I had to figure out what to do as they close at 6:30 on Sundays. I needed gas so I drove to Costco and got gas and then it was what turned out to be my usual Sunday night dinner at Wendy’s. I have gone here several times as Susan and a few times as my male self and have never seen a male worker till tonight. There was one male working here tonight and the rest female.

Now they were busy and I had to stand in line, in front of me was a young couple with the most adorable little girl about 3. She was dancing around and smiling and talking with everyone in line and she kept coming back to me and looking at my boots. Any way soon it was there turn to order and the mom took the little girl over to a table and the man ordered a burger and a couple glasses of water and then pulled out a pocket full of change mostly pennies to try and pay for it. Now I felt bad so I gave him some money so he could order food for all of them. He thanked me and ordered more food. Now I felt really good it was the best money I have spent.

Now I spent about an hour here finishing my studying as I ate. It was a really good evening out. It really is nice being light later now. I got home a little after 8 and so ends my vacation. Tomorrow back to work. Thanks for reading and be sure to see what’s new in Susan’s life on my most recent blog.

It is Saturday and my vacation is coming to an end, well not a true vacation as I had time I needed to use and things I needed to do around home but it did allow me some Susan time. Of course, I am going out tonight, I was home a little before 4 and started getting ready. Cassandra was hoping to be there by 6 and that was my goal although I was hopping earlier. It still amazes me that we use to not even go out till 9 or later and close places down and now we go early so we can get home at a decent hour. Part or it I am sure is age which creeps up on everyone. But more than that I think it is the fact we are more willing to go out early. I was ready a little before 5 and took a couple quick pictures before I left as I tend to forget once I am out.

Yes, tonight I was wearing my little, tight black dress and of course my corset under it. Now I have been wearing the corset a lot more probably 80% of the time I go out and I have found it has formed more to my body. The first time I put it on it took me over 20 minutes to get it on and laced up of course there was a learning curve to this but it was also harder to lace up. I can now get it tighter and it laces a lot easier. I think it only takes about 5 minutes now and yes, it is tighter then the first times I wore it but it does give me a nice shape as it pulls my waist in and comes down over the hips which actually makes my hips look bigger. It really is quite comfortable accept for getting in and out of the car or bending over to pick something up. Here is a picture of the corset I bought. It really is cute and the one I got is actually designed to be wore on the outside of your clothes. I just don’t think that would work for me, but it also works under my clothes just a little thick and during the Summer I am sure it will be hot.

Any way I was on my way to the Escape a little before 5 and got there at 5:20 and there were all kinds of parking spots right in front. As I said getting in and out of a car in a corset is not a graceful thing if you have a small car. I went inside and I of course was the first to get there from our group although there was probably 10 other people here already most at the bar. I remember when I would sit in the car till I saw someone I knew as I didn’t want to be the first one to arrive. I ordered dinner and got out my computer.

I had just finished my dinner when Cassandra showed up right about 6. We talked for a few minutes about Diva Las Vegas, we are both looking forward to it. We both changed our reservations so we arrive in Las Vegas on April 14 and leave on the 21st. We will be going through Palm Springs to drop Peggy off and pick up Julie. It will be so fun to have 3 of us in the car the whole trip. We have 8 of us for sure going and I hope a few more will go.

It wasn’t long and Nicole showed up. Her and her wife are down here for the weekend so she got to come out with us tonight. It is always so much fun to see her. She has been out almost as much as me this year. She started a blog but has it set to private so she can keep track of her outs. I would highly recommend this to everyone. Private or Public, transgender or not, keep a record of the things you do in life that are important to you, ad pictures, events, people you meet, places you go. Some day you will want to look back on things you did and this is a great way. When I ran into my neighbor that knows about Susan at Starbucks Friday I was able in just a couple minutes to look back and find the blog where she found out. Growing up I always thought diaries were silly but I really wish I had started my blog earlier and of course I did lose some of my blogs from GeoCities and yahoo 360 when they shut down. I now keep a lot of my blogs also on my computer just in case. Kimberly also showed up early so we have 4 of us here by a little after 6. The 4 of us talked about a lot of things as we waited for others to show up.

Next Kate, Melissa, Laura H. and Max showed up so we were up to 8.one of the local ladies at the bar came over and joined us for a while and of course she told us how nice we all looked which I never get tired of hearing. By 8 it was getting busy which is always nice to see as I do like when there is a big crowd more fun to people watch. WE all had a great time talking and of course a few of the girls played pool. By 9 Kimberly and Melissa had both left, tonight is daylight savings so we will move the clocks ahead 1 hour so we get less sleep tonight. I think a lot of us were planning on calling it an early night. About 9:30 Karaoke started and that is when it gets loud and hard to talk any more. Nicole was the next to leave, with Diva Las Vegas coming up in 5 weeks this will be her last trip down before we go so it will be a while till I see her again. She really is a good friend and has been coming out with the group pretty regular when you figure she lives 3 hours away. I still remember the first time I met her at Washington Square, that was February of 2014, wow 4 years ago. I was going out shopping and she contacted me on Facebook. She was in town and wanted to meet me. She was not dressing yet so I would meet her male side. It was a wonderful meeting and we hit it off and now she goes out as much as I do if not more. I really have met some wonderful friends as Susan and even the ones I meet now shape my life and Susan in some way.

It was almost 10 and I paid my bill as I was going to go home, after all with moving the clocks forward tonight it really is 11. Lori showed up as she is our late girl. She comes out around 10 and I guess stays till closing although I can’t say for sure as it has been a long time since I have been out that late. Well I got talking to her which was fun and of course listened to some of the karaoke and before I knew it, it was after 11. It will be a short night. I got home about 11:45 and I was ready for bed. The only problem was I had washed my sheets and blanket today so I had to make my bed first. Now I tried doing this as Susan and it was hard as 5-inch heels, and a corset are not normal stuff you wear. Strangely enough though what gave me the most trouble was my hair which kept getting in my face every time I bent over, so I removed the hair and finished making my bed before taking my heels, dress and corset off. Wow I would not want to be a maid.

Ok I have all day Friday free so it will be a Susan day although I will get a late start. Last month on my vacation when I went shopping with Peggy for the day we had stopped at Nordstrom’sMAC counter and found out they were doing a beauty event this week. Well any way yesterday I called and set up an appointment to get my makeup done, they are kind of mini makeovers about 30 minutes and as I waited so long the only time I could get was noon. So that would be my first stop as they just wanted me to do my foundation and nothing else so I was not about to go out looking like that.

I got ready and I did my eyebrows also so by 11 I was already, trust me looking in the mirror and just having foundation on and nothing else was not that flattering. It may work for woman but not for me. I got to Nordstrom’s at Clackamas at about 11:45 and walked in very conscious of how I looked. I went straight to the MAC counter and checked in and they were ready for me. Now they had chairs set up and I got to sit right in front of the counter almost in the door way coming in from the mall facing the mall, about as center stage as you can get. The young lady who helped me was named Moani and was very nice. She asked me what I wanted and I really had no idea so I just told her a nice look for going out tonight and she took it from there. Now it is an interesting experience as I had another woman sitting to my right and a young girl to my left, she was 11 and her mom brought her in for the makeover. Moani started on my eyes and did a really nice job kind of a subtle Smokey eye look that really could be for day or evening. She then did some contouring on my face and some highlighter and then my lips. Moani was very pleasant and talked to me the whole time. It really was fun. She finished about 12:30 so a little over the 30 but it was great. I did buy the highlighter set. As I liked the way it looked on me and I felt I should buy something for the experience. Moani was awesome as were all the girls working here, I would highly recommend them if you need some MAC cosmetics or just some help or advice.

Moani told me to come back any time and also asked for my phone number and said she would put me in her contacts and let me know when they do these events again. I looked really good and I thanked her. Now as I was at the mall I walked out into the mall and looked around for a while. I went into several stores including Victoria’s Secret but didn’t buy anything. It really was just window shopping today as the reason I went here was to get the makeover. I left the mall a little after 2 and wanted to get closer to home and beet the traffic. On the way back, I did stop and get my car washed as it really needed it and also went and got lunch at the Wendy’s I have been going to and yes once again it was all females working today.

After that I went to the Starbuck’s by my house, I got there a little after 3 and they were busy. The only open table was in the corner by the door with the high seats which I don’t like as I like to be able to put my feet on the ground. Being the only table, I took it and figured I would move once one of the other tables open up which it did about 15 minutes later so I picked up my stuff and moved.

Now on a side note as you all know one of my neighbors found out about Susan several years ago in October of 2012, wow doesn’t seem like 5 ½ years ago, and she has been fine with it and has never brought it up and all the times I have left or come back home she has seen me many times in my car but she has never brought it up and always treated me the same but I have sometimes wished she would bring it up and ask me any questions she has. Or maybe we would get home one time at the same time and she would see me in person other than just in the car or that brief few seconds I was on TV but that is all it has been. At least till know.

As I was moving my stuff to the other table there she was, she was in Starbucks getting a drink. I heard her say high Neighbor so we talked for a few minutes as she waited for her drinks. This is the first time she has seen me this close in person. Turns out she had just got her nails done at the salon next door to Starbuck’s, I use the one across the street. Any way we talked a little while longer before she headed home. As she was leaving she told me I looked really good which made me feel good. You know the funny thing is it felt perfectly normal to be talking to her and I really wasn’t even thinking about how I was dressed. We were just two neighbors talking. After she left I wondered if I should have told her not to tell anyone about this side of me as she does know my parents who as far as I know do not know about this side of me but she has known my parents for several years now and I am guessing if she was going to tell them she would have by now.

Now I was back to my normal time at Starbuck’s and I got out my computer and caught up on some e-mails. I worked on my blog for a while also. I really do like writing my blog as Susan while I am out. I will probably spend a few hours here at Starbuck’s and then will figure out what I will do for the rest of the evening. If I do something more today I will add to my blog for tomorrow as I plan on going out Saturday night also.

Thanks for reading and be sure and keep up with what is new in Susan’s life on my most recent blog.

The week has been busy, I had hoped to get out to dinner with my friends on Wednesday night but it was after 6 when I got home. So, I was setting my sights on Thursday as I have till midafternoon free. I got up Thursday morning and started getting ready. I was ready a little before 10. I was going to Lloyd Center for a little shopping. I got there about 10:15 and went in. Now Lloyd Center is not busy and has not been for a long time at least when I have gone. Nordstrom’s closed a while back and Sears will close on April 8th and there are a couple other stores that have signs in the windows everything must go so guessing they will also close plus there are several that are empty or closed. I am wondering if the mall will survive.

Any way my first stop was Sears to see what they had left which is not much but pretty much everything is 50% to 60% off I looked through the clothes and shoes and they are pretty well picked over at least in my size. From here it was out into the mall, I went into Suncoast, Macy’s, Ulta, Ross, Torrids, and a few others I can’t remember the names of. It really was more about just being out for a while. I even spent a little time in Barnes & Noble which is a good place to pass time. It was a little after 12 when I left Lloyd Center.

Now as I said I don’t have a lot of time today as I have to be someplace at 4 as my male self so I decided to get closer to home so I don’t get caught in rush hour traffic later. I decided I would go to Starbucks for a while and I decided to try a new one, turns out there is one right next to the Wendy’s I have been going to so that was where I would go.

I got there about 12:30 and went in, wow they were really busy and there was only 1 table open right by the door, and there were 3 people in line so I set my stuff down on the table and went and ordered my drink. There were also a lot of young kids who came in but they all got drinks to go. There was also a draft every time the door opened probably why this was the last table open, glad I got a hot chocolate today. I stayed here till 2:30 before heading home.

About

HI all my name is Susan Miller and I am a crossdresser in my mid 50’s. I live in the Portland metro area of Oregon in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. I like to dress up as a woman and go out with friends. This does not mean I am gay, far from it. I am only attracted to genetic woman sorry guys. I just have a love of all things female, makeup, dresses, high heels and long nails, acrylic nails. There is nothing like going to the nail salon and having your nails done.

Some people may not understand my way of life so I thought I would create a blog to write about it to try to help explain why and how I feel when I am Susan. This will also serve as a record for myself of my life as Susan Miller.

I am not a woman trapped in a man’s body and I have no desire to be a woman full time but I do have a woman inside that needs to be able to express herself. I guess the best way to explain is that I have both a feminine and masculine side to me and both feel right and comfortable to me although I will admit that I probably lean more to the feminine side. This means I am more gentle and caring and more soft spoken and I enjoy a lot of what society would call feminine activities. I just really like being Susan sometimes and I love dressing up and wearing pretty clothes and makeup. Women are so lucky. They have all the cute clothes and shoes while men get plain boring stuff to wear.

Please feel free to read my blogs and leave comments, but please be respectful. I do not judge others and respect your right to agree or disagree with the way I chose to live. I would love to have you post a comment and you may agree or disagree with me and my life and I will not delete it as I think it is important to have all views but if you leave a disrespectful comment I will delete that. Also any crossdressers or genetic girls that are okay with this please feel free to contact me. Also if you have any questions please feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer them but remember any statements made here are the sole opinion of Susan Miller and no one else.