When you don't get enough sleep, all kinds of crap crosses your mind...

Friday, April 04, 2008

Celebrity Letters: David Bromstadt

Dear David,

You know, I totally respect that you won the first Design Star contest with all your stunning talent, you taught yourself how to build, and you create wonderful artwork for every client on your show, Color Splash. I even find some really awesome ideas I'd like to try. It's great, I'm happy for you, good wishes.

Thing is, though, I'm starting to see a pattern in your work. You're too liberal with the orange.

No, seriously. You use it TOO MUCH. And it's even worse when you bust out the avocado green to complement it. I swear it's like an episode of That 70s Show, only with no bald guy calling everyone a dumbass, and the furniture pieces are way nicer.

I suppose I can't really blame you for some of the color choices, because it seems to be some kind of interior decorating trend, if any of the other shows on that channel are any indication. But I say buck the trend! Do you really want to be responsible for bring back decor from the seventies? Gack! If your clients say they want warm tones, give them a warmed-up beige with some red. I have yet to hear anyone say "Please, give me more orange." That's like "I gotta have more cow bell." Who the hell asks for that?

Yours,Sleepless Mama

P. S. If it's any consolation, you're way better than Constance Ramos. She uses entirely too much pink. In her commercial, she's standing there trying to name the pink paint. She loves the pastels and floral, which I guess is just her thing, but the pink has got to stop. Even when she goes for bolder colors, they are still PINK or PURPLE. When the homeowner is telling her that a color looks too "festive" (emasculating) for his taste, you'd think she'd take the hint, but no. Please, if you see her, tell her it's not cool, nor awesome, nor tasteful by any stretch of the word, for a grown man to have a pinkish-red wall anywhere other than his daughter's bedroom, or possibly his wife's bathroom (and even then, no). If she gives you shit about the orange, remind her that at least orange works for more than one gender.