When should I give my son access to his inheritance?

When my partner died I set aside £30,000 for our son from his estate. He is now 14 and I'm trying to decide when would be the best time to allow him access: 16, 18, 21 - or even later. I don't want him going off the rails, but it is his money to use as he wishes. What do readers advise?

• I'm in a similar situation. My son's father died when he was two. Since then, deciding what will go into my will has proved a nightmare.

If I get run over by a car next week, everything will be put into trust for him and, because I own my own flat, there will be quite a hefty sum. He's only eight, so for the first years he'll be provided for by the trust.

But at what age do my trustees hand everything over to him? 18? Too young, agrees everyone including my solicitor - he'll blow it all in no time at all. 30? That seems faintly ludicrous to me. My solicitor advises 25.

I've spend silly amounts of time agonising over this, but have now decided I will assess his character as he grows, and change the will accordingly. At the moment, he gets his hands on my dosh at 25. But I've given myself permission to change the will at any time to 18, which is my preference, if he carries on being the amazingly sorted person he seems to be at present. So, in answer to your question, what kind of a person is he? A bit wild? Wait until he's calmed down. An entrepreneur?

Hand it over quick - he might make you both a fortune!Fenella Greenfield, London, who wins this week's £25 National Book Token

• We got it wrong with our two boys, whereas both the girls were sensible! We found that 18 was too early. Can you find a male friend whom your son knows, so that it can end up as a "man-to-man" discussion? Then discuss with your friend the outcome you want your son directed towards, and get his views; then get your son involved.

Personally, I would suggest £1-2,000 at 18 for a gap year. Then give him enough to get through university debt-free - difficult to forecast what that might be until nearer the time. But with luck he will start his career with about £20,000 on deposit. Tell him how lucky he is - he can go through life without ever needing to borrow money, apart from a mortgage.A F Bennett, Chichester

• If your son is unaware of the money then it will be easier for you, as you will be able to make your own judgement as to when access should be granted. If he does know the situation, then you should discuss with him, when appropriate, the best course of action for him to obtain maximum benefit in the future.Tony Mayston, Buckingham

• If your son wants to go to university, the answer is simple: give him £10,000 per year during his course so he won't leave with a huge debt to pay off. If he doesn't, consider waiting until he is at least 25 and mature enough to deal with the windfall. I have given this a lot of thought, because my two children are both financially secure and my money will be divided between my grandchildren.

A friend's son was left a similar sum when he was 17 and immediately bought a fast car. Within six months he had been banned from driving, and a year later all the money had gone.Alison Howard, Farnham, Surrey

• Is your son likely to go to university? If so, at 18 offer him the choice: he can have the money to help him with his education - it might save him having to take a soul-destroying job while he's trying to study.Pam Lunn, Kenilworth, Warwickshire

• If possible, do not make your son aware of the money. That way, he will not grow up with an expectation that it is there.

On his 17th or 18th birthday I would make a sum available for him to buy a car, to either learn to drive, or for when he has passed his test.

I would suggest a second-hand car rather than new, as I believe this will mean he will appreciate future brand-new cars he may buy. The remainder of the money should then be made available at 21. It may seem like a long time to wait, but I am sure he will make better, more rounded, responsible decisions than at 16 or 18.

If the housing market is in a situation similar to the present one, you may even end up giving him the gift of a deposit for his own home and setting him up for the future.Karen, Birmingham

• The best age to inherit is 27. By then he will probably wish to spend it on somewhere to live, rather than on something to drive fast.Jason Ditton, Glasgow

Any answers?

A friend has told me that by leaving the Christmas food shopping to the last minute, it is possible to pick up half-price turkeys. He always goes to the supermarket at 3pm on Christmas Eve as the store workers start slashing the prices of perishable foods. I'm happy to chance it but worry it will all be sold. Does anyone else do this? Will it work?