Playing the Terror Card

The GOP isn’t very good at growing an economy, managing the environment, or doing nation building, but there’s one thing they have down pat: Staying on message.

In case your memory of the last terror alert is growing dim, the GOP would just like to give you a friendly reminder: TERRORISTS WILL CUT OFF YOUR HEAD IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR BUSH!

"The presidential election campaign has entered a two-month period when the threat of an al Qaeda attack to disrupt the process could be greatest, a White House official warned on Thursday. The official, who spoke on condition of anonymity, cited no evidence of an imminent attack inside the United States."

And what the heck. If crying "Wolf!" can influence the election, the GOP might as well use the same tactic to further their policy goals as well,

"Tampering with prescription drugs could be a way for terrorists to launch an attack on Americans, acting Food and Drug Administration Commissioner Lester M. Crawford said. Crawford said possible action by terrorists was the most serious of his concerns about the increasing efforts of states and cities to import drugs from Canada to save money."

That's the FDA's most serious concern about seniors getting prescription drugs without paying over-inflated prices? Bush's FDA sounded slightly less insane back when they were frantically warning us about poor quality-control of Canadian drugs, as if Canada was some third-world junta.

"A spokesman for the Homeland Security Department said it has received 'no specific information' of such a threat." Of course not. Tune in next week, when "White House officials" announce that al Qaeda wants to strengthen Social Security - the program will be dismantled immediately for your protection.

The terrorists are coming to get you all, and George W. "Quick-draw" Bush, the CEO cowboy fighter pilot from Connecticut, is your only hope. Wait! Is that a terrorist behind that tree? Better vote for Bush! Now! BOOGA BOOGA BOOGA!