Wednesday, May 7, 2014

But I’m not angry…

This whole area of admitting instead of blaming can be a difficult thing
to do.Lionel my fictional friend who
came to my front porch for emotional healing found it so. So I discussed with him that the reason why it
is difficult to admit we have a problem is because we want to
play God.That’s it.

You see, we have something inside of us that wants to decide what is
right and what is wrong.You say,
"I don't want anybody telling me what is right or wrong.I know what is right and wrong for me.I am my own boss.I make my rules.I am the center of my universe and I am going
to live my own way, if it feels good, I am going to do it.I don't want anybody telling me what to do
with my own life."

Lionel was angry that his wife had left him. He had a right to be angry.
And no one had a right to tell him anything different.But that attiude was messing up his life.

Is that true of you in whatever area that is in your life.Why is it you over eat or drink too much
alcohol or whatever your problem that controls you is?Nobody is going to tell me what to do.

But to get your life on the right road, you need to realize that
you are not God.

Lionel wanted to know how he was playing God?Good question. Maybe you have that question too.

I told him that we play Godby
denying we are humane and trying to control everything for selfish reasons.We
want to be in control so we try to control ourselves; we try to control other
people and everything around us.

We try to control our image.We want to control what other people think of
us; we don't want other people to really know what we are like.Is that true?

We play games, we wear masks, we pretend, we fake it, we want people to
see certain sides of us and we hide other sides and we deny our weaknesses and
we deny our feelings."I'm not
angry.I'm not upset.I'm not worried.I'm not afraid."We don't want people to see the real us.

So I told him here is the problem.If I tell you who I really am and you don't like me, tough on me 'cause
I'm all I've got.So we try to hide and
we try to control our image.That’s a
good place to stop for today.

Why, Bill? Why it can be only me trying to control everything at the centre of the universe? What about the other guy who thought actually I was at the tip of a hurtling comet in an anti-universe? Anyway, I like how you hash it out between you and your fictional friend.