Posts Tagged ‘loving others’

I think we learn at an early age how to navigate relationships in the most manipulative of ways just by the reactions of those around us. Think of the baby learning to smile and laugh, mommy makes faces or tickles and baby feels her joy and responds back with giggles and toothless smiles. Or the sneaky toddler touching the fancy shmoo-shmoo on the coffee table, he looks at mama…waits a second to see if she’s going to stop him and when she doesn’t he launches into a full-on grab of the forbidden item. Manipulation at it’s early stages. As we grow, our behavior does too. We learn to compartmentalize feelings, emotions and actions.

Our “training” doesn’t help us when it comes to feeling accepted or loved by God. We tend to feel useless or unlovable based on our earthly understanding of what is good and bad. Don’t misunderstand, sin is bad. Sinful lifestyles separate us from God. Repentance brings us back to Him and offers us a whole new chance. God doesn’t NOT LOVE US and then LOVE US based on anything that we do or don’t do (except acknowledging Him as Savior and Lord) – we are His children once we accept Him as Lord and He does not play games with His children.

Don’t you wish people were like that?

We tend to toy with people and relationships. God never does that. He just loves us, cares for us and promises us that He will never leave us or forsake us. He’s never coy or distant. He doesn’t get a thrill out of punishing us or withholding something we need from Him. We do that all the time with people. We get mad, hold grudges and we even act out cruelly to others.

I’m so glad God never acts like me.

Yesterday, the message at church was powerful. It forced me to look inward at my heart and the way I feel about loving others. Like most people, I love with conditions. Do you love me? Okay, I love you back! You mistreat me? I avoid you and treat you with disdain too! Perhaps those are protective conditions. I’m just trying to cover myself from pain or unkindness.

God isn’t into that. He doesn’t love in pieces. He doesn’t love under any conditions. He loves fully, without a care of His own treatment. Obviously, as a Christian I’ve lived like heck and still God held onto me as if I were His only child. Undeserved. Unearned. Unbelievable.

I’m convicted to change the way I love others.

My flesh is weak and wormy. Why? Because when it gets ugly in life I tend to turn bitter and resentful. When my hubby lost his job (oh ya, that.) I immediately felt all the anger and resentment a person could hold in one body towards anyone who had anything to do with destroying our livelihood. I was and still do feel so hurt that my insides twist up in knots threatening to send me to bed for days. Not good. Not at all like Christ wants for me.

If I’ve learned anything about God…..it’s that HE HAS ALL AUTHORITY AND POWER OVER ME AND MY CIRCUMSTANCES.

No one, even someone who means you harm has full authority over you. You can bank on that. God is all-consuming and He will cover (His child) and protect you from anything that isn’t from Him.

I don’t have to dwell on resentment or feel jilted by someone who doesn’t see life as I do – I can love and trust God to do whatever it is to make it right. He might do that now or even after I’m long gone. Whichever, I trust Him.

No one can escape criticism. Somewhere along life's path, it will find each of us. As a blogger, I am open to all sorts of disagreements or misunderstandings. What I say here may be completely offensive to one reader and a home run for another. I understand that.

But my heart…..

I feel it's important that I tell you what is deep inside my heart. It's probably not anything like you imagined. My battles are no different than anyone else's, except that I do have the promise of a Savior who gets me (and is ever forgiving). He sees my heart and my intentions. He knows when I'm being mean and He knows when I'm being heartfelt.

But people….sometimes, do not and I understand.

Sin has a hold on this world. A clinging tight grip. For many, the line between right and wrong is zig-zaggy and wonky. I see it all around me and you do too. But for the most part, we just look away. Why? Because, WHO ARE WE TO JUDGE? (Another lie from the enemy!) When do you think it will be acceptable to speak truth?

I try very hard to be truthful and Christ-like. Do I get it right every time? No, not even close. I'm a human, one born into a world of sin. Even knowing better…..I make errors. I overstep, I overthink…..I even overSCRUTINIZE! Those who are close to me and talk to me know, I am not perfect!

I will never be….this side of heaven.

What is inside my brain mixes pretty heavily with what is down in my heart. My method for spilling it out may be skewed at times but I pray that you who read my words see that my greatest desire is to honor God. I never want to turn anyone away from Him. My blog is my space to write out all that is trapped inside my overflowing brain. So, if I say something offensive…..it's not my true intention to wound or slay anyone, ever.

My last two posts offended someone and she called me out. I felt defensive and maybe even a little bruised up over it. But, I admit…..I took her advice and decided to make sure I'm filtering out what I say a little better. My intentions were never meant to be mean-spirited with my posts. The opposite, really. I was trying to ENCOURAGE readers to NOT fall into the enemy's tricky perfection trap with always posting the perfectly posed photos. I also meant to encourage those who post sexy photos of themselves to post a beautiful smile instead. There's nothing wrong with being beautiful and showing a smile instead of lucious pouty lips is "right on" in my book.

I appreciate the call out. However, my heart isn't just a place of "I'm so good, you're so bad!"…..it's a genuine spot of concern and love for others. I want to LIFT UP and not tear down, I want to speak truth with honesty and I want to love with a love like Christ.

I've always been puzzled by folks who point out any mention of sin as being judgemental because….SIN IS SIN, right? Pointing it out doesn't always mean judging (again, the heart intention). Sometimes the hard stuff has to be said (right Preachers?) and who do you think is going to say it? Non-believers? Uhm, no. That's not gonna happen. None of us want to be told we are sinful, yet…all of us are!

So, next time someone jumps your case for calling sin, sin. Remind them that as a follower of Jesus Christ each of us have the job to love other's enough to hold them to a standard worthy of Jesus. Sugar-coating trouble doesn't help anyone but neither does haughty speak laced with condemnation.

Let me be clear. I love other's and I want my words and actions to show that every day. I won't apologize for my previous posts because they were not meant to hurt or slice anyone up. My hope is that what I say here will give reader's a launching pad to THINK. Roll it over in your own head and heart and make your decision for yourself. I'm only a vessel…