Scientists Reveal Dinosaurs Went Extinct to Escape Their Nagging Wives

A new report from the Paleontological Society of America has revealed that the only reason the dinosaurs went extinct 66 million years ago was to escape their nagging wives.

“New fossil evidence from the late Cretaceous Period shows that their wives were relentless in badgering the dinosaurs to get off the couch and help around the house once in a while,” said chief scientist Dr. Nels Beaulieu. “Clearly, they didn’t understand that the dinosaurs just had a long day at work and want to relax and have a few beers without them breathing down their neck.”

The report is based on years of field work done by Dr. Beaulieu and his wife, Dr. Annette Smith-Beaulieu. Dr. Smith-Beaulieu is famous for being the first to notice that T. rex was especially susceptible to leaving the toilet seat up.

“It’s clear that the dinosaurs weren’t pulling their weight around the house or showing their wives the respect they deserved,” said Dr. Smith-Beaulieu. “Maybe if the dinosaurs didn’t keep forgetting their anniversary their wives wouldn’t have had to nag them about it every week.”

Just how the dinosaurs managed to extinguish themselves en masse is not yet known, but the fossil record indicates the lawn had not been mown for at least two million years prior to the event.

“This all could have been prevented if the dinosaurs would just listen to me, I mean their wives, from time to time,” added Dr. Smith-Beaulieu.