When it doesn’t ‘just happen’

I’d never thought about whether or not I would be able to have children. I was focused on my career my friends my husband. Children were something I wanted sure, but of course it will naturally happen later. Of course I’ll be able to have them when the time is right. Of course that’s the way life naturally progresses.

As a fit, healthy thirty year old I’d finally reached a point in my life where I was ready to bring a child into the world. I had travelled, forged a great career, had a wonderful husband. Kids would now be the icing on the cake, the easy part.

Everyone around me was having kids. Happy families flooded social media and TV screens. Falling pregnant was something everyone was able to do. In fact my whole life I’d be told just how easy it was and how ‘careful’ I needed to be.

So I assumed that it would just happen. Unfortunately for me, that wasn’t the case.

I had never really ‘failed’ at anything. My stubbornness and perseverance had seen me through every hurdle so far. But I was now seriously failing at the most important thing I would ever do. Something that would have life changing consequences if I couldn’t ‘succeed’. Something that everyone else seemed to be doing easily. Actually more than easily, even by accident it was that simple. I felt like a failure.

The idea that I may never have children consumed me. The vision I had had of my life since I was a child, the vision that I had always presumed would become reality was now fading into the distance. My well-meaning husband tried to console me with ideas about how great our life could still be without a family, but my brain refused to look at the world he was envisaging. It was too far from the picture I had had in my mind for so long.

And I knew this was not really the world he wanted either. I knew he wanted children as much as I did. I knew his words were only that. Words to make me feel better. Not a true reflection on how he felt.

I can now look back on my journey from a different perspective. Fortunately for me, utilising my existing and expanding professional knowledge as a Naturopath and my husband being a in the medical field as a Cardiologist, we were able to conceive and carry our two beautiful children. For that, I am forever grateful. I’m also now grateful for the struggle that informed my career path as I became passionate about helping other people facing fertility challenges, by providing them with access to the type of expert information I was fortunate enough to have.

I am also truly blessed to personally help many women and couples, seeing them through their journey from infertility to pregnancy and finally seeing their beautiful babies and sharing their joy. Although my struggles were difficult at the time, I can now see how it has shaped my life in ways I could not have imagined and wouldn’t change for the world. I have an empathy and passion for patients that extends beyond my professional training and enables me to truly support them in ways I wish I had had.

About The Author

As a Naturopath and Nutritionist, I have always been passionate about helping people live healthier and happier lives, but after experiencing personal struggles with fertility, I shifted my focus to helping couples successfully conceive and carry healthy babies.