Wire up people’s cars so the horn comes on as soon as their car is started.

Ride a unicycle to work.

E-mail Microsoft to tell them about bugs in Windows XP that aren’t actually there.

Stare at people for about five minutes, making sure they know you’re staring at them. Then, slowly sneak up to them while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff their head, then run away. Repeat.
Continuously mumble during a conversation.

Take off the eraser to every pencil in your house, or better yet, someone else’s house.

When in a chat room, spell everything incorrectly.

Insist on “Weird Al” sing-a-longs.

On a hot summer day, ride up and down the road and drench pedestrians with squirt guns.

When walking down a main road, act like a drunk.

Wear nothing but white and go mud wrestling.

Walk up to someone eating. Lean over and stare at them intently until they notice. Continue to do so until they ask what you’re doing. Reply, “I’ve been watching you eat for the last 30 seconds.. You’re weird!” Leave the restaurant.

When walking, talk to yourself constantly.

Move people’s bookmarks ahead three pages when they aren’t looking.

Call the operator. When asked, “Can I help you?” reply, “No thanks, just browsing.”

On a night other than Halloween, get a few friends together and dress like Jason from Friday the 13th. Have each of you stand a mile apart on a highway.

After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that you haven’t received enough chocolate sprinkles.

Spread fertilizer on half your neighbor’s lawn.

Add A535 (liquid heat) to that little hole down the center of someone’s anti-perspirant.

Add blank entries to lists, to make it look like it’s longer.

Call every pager number you know and leave the number for your local McDonald’s.

Wash and scrub the trees in your front lawn.

Throw newspapers back at paperboys.

Tell people their fly is down when they’re wearing sweat pants.

Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.

At random times in a conversation, say “Hi,” “Hello Sir, how are you?” or “Have a good day, thank you.”

Put electrical tape over the headlights of someone’s car.

Walk up to random strangers insisting you are family.

Dress like a “High-class rich person” and wash windows at random street corners. Demand a dollar in a British accent.

When a cop pulls you over, when they step up to your car, drive forward slowly and make them walk. Especially if it’s raining.

In an office, lock all the doors behind you.

Face the back when standing in an elevator.

Grin so wide it hurts your cheeks at every salesperson in town.

When at an ATM, try to have a conversation with it, or pretend it stole your card. (This works best if there’s a line.)

Unbend all the paperclips you can find, then replace every eraser you can find with a rubber band.

Answer every question with another question. As soon as one of you says a statement instead of a question, shout “I win!”.

Pose as a client at a bank or other professional institution, and when you are seated in front of their desk, keep rearranging the items on top into different patterns and tell them you are “just reorganizing things.”

Press the “power” button on on someone’s computer or keyboard when they’re almost finished typing up a long essay, story etc. Apologize sincerely, claiming that you thought it was the focus adjustment.

Mow your carpet. (Or preferably somebody else’s)

Vacuum your lawn.

Recite shakespearian poetry to everyone you meet.

Go to McDonalds and ask for a BK Whopper.

Order a pizza and ask them if they can “please put the crust on top this time” in an exasperated voice.

Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask “Is that a threat?”

When in an elevator, in different voices, shout out random floors, and then watch as you get there, no one gets off.

Also, when riding up an elevator with a stranger, start singing a song that everyone knows, then expect them to start singing too. If they do not start singing, insist, “Everyone knows that song. Are you stupid?”

While walking make car noises loudly (Such as changing gears).

Whenever somebody says something, ask what the simplest word they said means. When they explain, ask what the simplest word in their explanation means. Repeat this for the entire conversation.

Go up to a someone and say, “Are you annoyed by irrelevant questions?” And then walk away very quickly.

Finish each sentence with “Monkey See, Monkey Do”.

Click your mechanical pencils or your pens during a test in school.

Pretend you are invisible.

Convince people you are deaf and talk in an incredibly phony sign language.

Spend all day at a fast food restaurant and see how long it takes before you have to pay for your “free” refills.

Continuously open your briefcase or bag and say into it, “Have you got enough air in there?”

While going down in an elevator scream, “AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!! WE’RE GONNA DIE!!!” for no apparent reason.

Call everyone a communist.

Explain “the little green men” in detail to someone, and when they don’t believe you, accuse them of being one in disguise.

Call your neighbors collect.

Whenever someone finishes a sentence say, “And then what happened?”

Page yourself over an intercom, but don’t disguise your voice.

Send people annoying chain forwards with outrageous consequences like “If you don’t send this to 300 people in 4 seconds you will die instantly” and then insist that it is true and it happened to your uncle.

When walking push an invisible cart and make loud squeaky noises.

Walk up to random people and ask them, very seriously, “Do you know the muffin man?”

Clear your throat every three or four words while speaking.

Look at your hand in amazement and say, “Whoa, I never knew I had this!”

While driving if you see a “How am I driving” bumper sticker, call the number and inform the operator that the driver is doing a great job.

When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.

When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.

Whenever anybody says anything to you. Respond by saying, “I know.”

Sending this list to all of your friends through email.

Continue to ask someone, “Is this annoying? Is this annoying?” over and over and over.

Tap someone on the shoulder repeatedly.

Begin every sentence with, “By the Gods!”

When you’re in an argument, no matter what it’s about, keep yelling “I don’t see your name on it!”.

When in public, pretend you are selling something in an infomercial.

At a restaurant, repeatedly send your food back for changes and after awhile insist that, “This isn’t what I ordered!”

Go to a shoe store and try on every shoe, then say that you aren’t interested in buying shoes and leave.

Put powdered sugar in your hair, sit down next to a stranger, and scratch your head a lot.

Turn on the Talk Radio Stations in your car, roll down your windows, and headbang.

Walk around with a plastic sword and shield and tell strangers “I must avenge the death of my father.”

Scotch tape your door as an Anti-theft Device.

Super Glue quarters to floors.

Put the wrong date and year on the papers you hand in to your teachers.

Call random numbers and say “Hi, this is Julie from Basken Robins. If you can name 31 flavors in 31 seconds you get a free scoop.”

WRIGHT N AL CAPITOL LETERS AND MISSSSSPEL EVRYTHIND!!!

Get two cell phones and talk to yourself on them in front of other people

Specify that your drive-thru order is “to go.”

If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will “swipe your grub.”