While I check out who’s parked near my yard, YOU guys read THIS article (from The Village Voice) about Lisa Marie Presley’s lyrics to her song (above). Believe me, you’ll be enlightened–just like she is and just like Katie is (and Poor Nicole). I want a REAL book out about this cult crap.

Wow. Not diggin' the eyeliner, but the dress by L'Wren Scott was okay.

Looks like Winona Ryder followed suit (or the other way around…). Winona looked “confused” most of the evening. I swear I saw her arms slung over the back of chair at one point. Weirdo.

Winona Ryder, looking alarmed in Alberta Ferretti.

I need to know WHY Kim Kardashian was in attendance to the SAG Awards. I did see a milli-second of Kim in a commercial montage with her on a bed eating a fast-food chain’s chicken salad. I guess I answered my own question. Let me say this about Kim. She wore her “own hair and eyelashes”–her words– with her Marchesa dress. (Usually, Marchesa is one of my favorite designers…but this dress looks like a grape Popsicle.) I hate to say this, but Kim looks just like her mom Kris Jenner in this photo.

Kim Kardashian...whyyyyyy?

Nicole Kidman? What made you decide to wear that necklace on top of the ruffles, lace and boning? It just doesn’t work with your pretty Nina Ricci gown, Love.

Oh, Nicole.

I saved to worst for last, though. Jenna Fischer. Dowdy McWallflower much? That drab color. Those unfortunate sleeves. The dress is by Fendi, just in case you’re interested. I’m not.

From "The Office", Jenna Fischer. D R A B.

Jenna really should embrace her “Pretty Girl” that is itching to get OUT. AND hire another stylist. ForpitySAKE, Jenna. Next year, I expect more from you…and by “more”, I mean BETTER.

The Academy Awards nominations might not be that big of a deal to some of us, but for first time nominees like Nine Inch Nails frontman, Trent Reznor, they’re surprised and honored.

In a statement, Reznor said:

“When David approached us to write the score for The Social Network we were intrigued and excited to see what we could bring to the project – but truly couldn’t imagine it would lead to an Oscar nomination.

“We are extremely grateful to the Academy and very proud to have contributed to David’s vision.”

Jennifer Lawrence Photo: Getty Images

“Winter’s Bone” actress, Jennifer Lawrence was shocked to hear of her nomination,

“I didn’t really feel anything at first and then when I was looking at the TV and I heard my name and saw my face on the television screen, I just kind of snapped.”

Jesse

Jesse Eisenberg snagged a nomination for Best Actor and was humble about his recognition. “I pretended not to think about it, but my heart was racing,” he told The Hollywood Reporter of Tuesday morning’s announcement. “This is such an ensemble movie. My acknowledgment is a testament to the entire ensemble, most notably Andrew Garfield.”

Andrew Garfield was “snubbed”,and while I don’t think Jesse will win, he kind of deserves a gold star for being just plain cute.

Of course, Natalie Portman “didn’t expect” to be nominated, COUGH-liar-COUGH, but she praised her director Darren Aronofsky who got a Best Director nomination.

“I am so honored and grateful to the Academy for this recognition. It is a wonderful culmination of the 10-year journey with Darren to make this film. Making ‘Black Swan’ is already the most meaningful experience of my career, and the passion shown for the film has completed the process of communication between artists and audience.

I am so thankful for the support we have received and I share this honor with the entire cast and crew of the film, especially Darren Aronofsky.”

Okay girl, we get it.

Nicole

Nicole Kidman was excited as well, and thanked her cast.

“What an extraordinary journey this film has taken me on! ‘Rabbit Hole’ has been a labor of love and I’m so thankful to John Cameron Mitchell, David Lindsay-Abaire and the brilliant cast. This nomination reflects all of the heart and soul that these people have put into it and I can’t thank them enough.”