Editor's Note: SPOILER ALERT! The following review contains spoilers. Don't read further if you don't want to learn some major plot points.

CLEVELAND, Ohio -- I decided to give "Mother!" an "F" when the mob killed and ate the baby.

"Mother!" is literally the worst movie I have ever seen. Written and directed by Darren Aronofsky ("The Black Swan"), "Mother!" is a sloppy amalgam of "Rosemary's Baby" and "The Shining." It's unoriginal, tedious and visually revolting. It looks like two different movies, both of them preposterous, raggedly sewn together by blind men.

Jennifer Lawrence and Javier Bardem play a married couple living in a large fixer-upper mansion in the middle of rural nowhere. The characters are not named. Bardem is a formerly popular poet suffering from a bad case of writer's block. He has not published anything in many years. Lawrence is his dutiful wife who spends her time rehabbing the old house.

Trouble comes a-knocking in the form of a mysterious stranger played by Ed Harris. He shows up one night inexplicably needing a place to stay. When he recognizes Bardem as the famous poet, he wins an invitation to spend the night.

The next day, Harris' wife, played by Michelle Pfeiffer, shows up. They are a weird, rude couple and immediately set Lawrence on edge. Everything about them is wrong. When Lawrence complains to her husband privately, he replies that it's "no big deal."

Then the visiting couple's two sons arrive, arguing over the dad's will. The argument gets physical, and one son kills the other.

All the while, the mysterious intruding family is occupying Bardem and Lawrence's house, Lawrence is discovering strange and gruesome features in the house. Blood drips from holes in the floor, a human organ appears in the bedroom toilet. Are these visions hallucinations, the result of the potion Lawrence keeps drinking when she experiences panic attacks? We will never know.

Soon a bizarre wake for the couple's dead son, including dozens of rude, inappropriate guests, is in full swing in the creepy mansion. Lawrence's mind begins to unravel.

Finally, she confronts her husband regarding his writer's block and their lack of sex. He immediately pounces on her, and a scene later, she announces she is pregnant. He has also completed a poem that is the best of his career.

Just when everything in this bizarre, sinking story seems to be collapsing under the weight of its own improbability, things are good again. She is happily pregnant and close to term; he is once again a superstar published poet.

Before the two can sit down to enjoy a celebratory dinner, the house is once again set upon by strangers. Hundreds and hundreds of strangers have come to the remote house to elevate Bardem to a godlike literary status. Once again, Lawrence begins to lose her mind. He can't get enough of it.

The next hour of the movie takes on the look and feel of a speed-driven, psychotic dream. Soon thousands of strangers have crowded into the house for a hellish bacchanal straight out of a Fellini film or a Bosch painting. Every manner of bizarre, ritual perversity is visited upon Lawrence in the name of praising her poet husband.

It all comes to a crescendo when she delivers her baby and Bardem gives it to the unruly mob to kill and eat. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.

If "Mother!" is supposed to be a fable about the price of creating great art, then Aronofsky has gone about the task like a madman killing a mosquito with a bazooka. Aronofsky is a writer and filmmaker in love with bashing the senses and sensibilities of his audience. This movie is a gleeful carnival of nauseating grotesqueries.

It would be difficult to find a filmmaker who has more contempt for his audience. He shouldn't be trusted with either a keyboard or camera, much less the budget to make a movie.