But why do you say you feel “ashamed?” There are times when I feel guilty that I don’t make great Halloween costumes for my kids, and then I think, well, for one thing it’s time and for another I think it’s more important to save money for college or give money to charity than it is for my kids to win “best costume of the year” at their school. I have different priorities about how to show my love to my kids, and that’s fine.

So, some parents have great kids who are wheelchair bound and one year they decide to show their love by putting a lot into cool Halloween costumes. Good for them. But why do you feel ashamed? You obviously love your kids, just in different ways. And as you’ve shared, your kids have their challenges too, just not as immediately obvious.

One of my pet peeves is when women are self-critical because they aren’t meeting the impossible expectation of being everything to everyone all the time. There’s nothing to be ashamed of in how and when you are able to express your creativity. Think of all the things the people who made those wheelchair costumes DIDN’T do while they were making the costumes! We’re all doing the best we can to do the best can. Well, most of us.

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Manolo the Shoeblogger is not Mr. Manolo Blahnik. This website is not affiliated in any way with Mr. Manolo Blahnik, any products bearing the federally registered trademarks MANOLO®, BLAHNIK® or MANOLO BLAHNIK®, or any licensee of said federally registered trademarks. The views expressed on this website are solely those of the author.