Most Popular

Outdated: Control the Pace

Updated: Let Her Take Over
In almost every culture's history, the man takes the lead in sex. But that's a patriarchal hang-up, says Quilliam. Let her control the pace and intensity (either initially or totally, depending on the mood), so that you both know what's best for her. The more fun she has, the better for you. Encourage her to be on top: It allows her to take advantage of a full range of positions—facing you, facing away, even sitting cross-legged on you. "There's a lot of value in just being a still object of resistance," Kerner says.