There's some poor bugger at my work who spends all day in the bogs locked in a cubicle wrestling with his guts. After 4 years of working where I do i'm yet to discover who this is. I think he just stays in there with a laptop or something. He's always in there when I go in, as he has very distinctive grunts/farts. Eeew.

Someone with the squits was dying to let it out and then realised they were late for a meeting. Or they'd been so many times that day that they couldn't go anymore.
Being male and therefore lazy, they just left it.
YES?