Saw the Golden Compass on telly the other day - quite liked at apart from the weird changes they made to the storyline, and the very odd place it ended. The book ended on a perfect crescendo, did the film fail because it stopped too early?

Yeah Chappie was better than 5/10. One of those awkward scoring things - I didn't think I could quite give Drive 8 but if I'd given Drive 7 there was no way I could give Chappie 6 so lowered it to 5. Prob should have gone 8 and 6. I'll live with it.

Haha yeah that's quality, enjoyed it. I don't really know how to rate an 8 minute short amongst full length ratings, so I won't try.
I like how everyone will think they knew the twist and then they don't. About all I can say without spoilering it. Good fun.

Haha yeah that's quality, enjoyed it. I don't really know how to rate an 8 minute short amongst full length ratings, so I won't try.
I like how everyone will think they knew the twist and then they don't. About all I can say without spoilering it. Good fun.

Totally. We were shown it in script writing class and from the title alone I figured I knew what was gonna happen but didn't.

Still haven't watched Chappie yet. I loved District 9 though so am kind of looking forward to it but man the title is really putting me off. I know it shouldn't but it's just a horrible title. Without spoiling is there a good reason he's called Chappie? As for scoring movies I agree with Matt. I tend to adjust the score I give one movie because of the score I gave another movie but I tend to only do this when marking out of ten. I prefer the 5 star scoring system.

Haha yeah that's quality, enjoyed it. I don't really know how to rate an 8 minute short amongst full length ratings, so I won't try.
I like how everyone will think they knew the twist and then they don't. About all I can say without spoilering it. Good fun.

Just watched it. I didn't particularly feel like I knew what was going to happen (and I don't think I would have done without the comments on this forum), and there wasn't like a twist where you think "Oh yeah, I should have seen that" anyway.

Haha yeah that's quality, enjoyed it. I don't really know how to rate an 8 minute short amongst full length ratings, so I won't try.
I like how everyone will think they knew the twist and then they don't. About all I can say without spoilering it. Good fun.

Just watched it. I didn't particularly feel like I knew what was going to happen (and I don't think I would have done without the comments on this forum), and there wasn't like a twist where you think "Oh yeah, I should have seen that" anyway.

Just watched this too. Fucking hell Gev, do you need to have everything spelled out for you? Spoilered for those that haven't watched yet:

The film opens with a typical quote from "mum" along the lines of "it's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye". This tells us that the theme of the film is "joke goes wrong" (or at least that will feature heavily). The action begins with a man being given the silent treatment from his bit of fluff, and we shortly learn it's because of a "joke that wasn't funny". So is this the joke that went wrong? Maybe we'll find out. They stop to refuel, at which point the poor browbeaten fella buys gifts to cheer up the miserable sow. At the same time he buys a fake spider - this is important because it leads us away from the original "joke that went wrong" (we never find out what it was) but also tells us about the standard of joke that the guy pulls. A plastic spider. It's daft, inoffensive - so this tells us that the women is likely overreacting wildly to the original joke, in that way that they do because they're humourless cunts. Later on, the woman discovers the plastic spider, almost crashes, and then jumps out of the car next to a busy carriageway. The guy explains that it's just a plastic spider - a joke - but she still then jumps backwards into the path of a fast-moving vehicle. Now, as Matt alludes to, this is the point at which most viewers will assume that "the joke has gone wrong"- but it isn't. Think about it for a second - the stupid bitch has got herself run over - directly because she can't take a fucking joke and has to be all overdramatic about it, like they always do. So the joke is still actually really funny. And it's only when, as a result of a jittery arachnophobic paramedic, our hero quite possibly literally "loses an eye", that the joke actually turns sour.

Jon Corby wrote:Just watched this too. Fucking hell Gev, do you need to have everything spelled out for you? Spoilered for those that haven't watched yet:

The film opens with a typical quote from "mum" along the lines of "it's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye". This tells us that the theme of the film is "joke goes wrong" (or at least that will feature heavily). The action begins with a man being given the silent treatment from his bit of fluff, and we shortly learn it's because of a "joke that wasn't funny". So is this the joke that went wrong? Maybe we'll find out. They stop to refuel, at which point the poor browbeaten fella buys gifts to cheer up the miserable sow. At the same time he buys a fake spider - this is important because it leads us away from the original "joke that went wrong" (we never find out what it was) but also tells us about the standard of joke that the guy pulls. A plastic spider. It's daft, inoffensive - so this tells us that the women is likely overreacting wildly to the original joke, in that way that they do because they're humourless cunts. Later on, the woman discovers the plastic spider, almost crashes, and then jumps out of the car next to a busy carriageway. The guy explains that it's just a plastic spider - a joke - but she still then jumps backwards into the path of a fast-moving vehicle. Now, as Matt alludes to, this is the point at which most viewers will assume that "the joke has gone wrong"- but it isn't. Think about it for a second - the stupid bitch has got herself run over - directly because she can't take a fucking joke and has to be all overdramatic about it, like they always do. So the joke is still actually really funny. And it's only when, as a result of a jittery arachnophobic paramedic, our hero quite possibly literally "loses an eye", that the joke actually turns sour.

I'd forgotten about the quote at the beginning actually. Suddenly I'm enjoying it more. But I don't really see it as losing an eye, more gaining a needle. Some people seem to like putting a negative spin on things. Also, if I missed any context at the beginning, it was because I was struggling to get used to the thick South African/New Zealand/Welsh/Farnborough/whatever is was accents that they had. But anyway, what did everyone think the twist was going to be?

Mark James wrote:Still haven't watched Chappie yet. I loved District 9 though so am kind of looking forward to it but man the title is really putting me off. I know it shouldn't but it's just a horrible title. Without spoiling is there a good reason he's called Chappie?

Not that I can remember. But don't worry about the title. It's kind of a humorous film though. I enjoyed it but a lot of the time the joke is just Chappie pluralising words for comic effect.

Getting sick of all this spoilering but here's my take on it:I could be wrong but I think Gev is misunderstanding Matt when he says people will think they know the twist. I don't think he means knowing or figuring it out before hand. I reckon most people assume the spider is going to cause her to crash the car. When it doesn't but then she gets hit by the car afterwards people then think, ah that's the twist (ie. they think they know the twist), but it's not. The twist is the guy loses his eye. Essentially there are two twists but as Matt didn't want to spoil that he said what he said in the way he did and confused you. Correct me if I'm wrong Matt.

I've been getting into really bad films lately. And I mean, really bad films. Airplane vs. Volcano - a film so bad that it doesn't even have a Wikipedia page (although imdb has it, of course) - and starring Dean Cain of TV Superman fame was good fun, but nothing compared to one I saw that had giant spiders jumping out of a volcano and shooting fireballs at everyone. I can't find it again now but it was amazingly ridiculous and acted completely straight. There was some sort of plot to it where the hero commandeers a bus (or maybe is a bus driver, I wasn't paying much attention at the time) and various spider-fireball mayhem ensues (with hilarious consequences, although almost certainly unintentionally hilarious). Anyway, if anyone can help with the title of that one I'd really like to track it down and see it again.

JimBentley wrote:I've been getting into really bad films lately. And I mean, really bad films. Airplane vs. Volcano - a film so bad that it doesn't even have a Wikipedia page

Or so good?

It did have a special quality about it, that's for sure; not sure I'd describe it as "good" though.

But a lot of these really bad films do have Wikipedia entries, such as this classic (starring Debbie Gibson) and anyway, I blame Samuel L. Jackson for kicking it all off with his snakes and that. I imagine he must have been on crack or something when he agreed to doing that one.

Sounds like the work of The Asylum Jim. They're a production company who make really bad movies. I love all the Mega Shark Vs various other creatures series and how could you not love Nazis at the Centre of the Earth?

P.S. The spider volcano thing could be Lavalantua. Arachnoquake was "good" as well though.

I've only watched the first minute so far and I think it's going straight into my top ten of films ever.

Or is it a short film at 30 minutes (curiously I was talking about this to someone the other day, how feature-length films could be better if "compressed" into half an hour)? Anyway, I'm off to watch the rest of it now.

I've only watched the first minute so far and I think it's going straight into my top ten of films ever.

Or is it a short film at 30 minutes (curiously I was talking about this to someone the other day, how feature-length films could be better if "compressed" into half an hour)? Anyway, I'm off to watch the rest of it now.

In conclusion, I have no fucking idea what all that was about but it was (by any interpretation that I would consider relevant) pretty amazing.

One thing that I do find especially funny about these films is that they all seem to feature the same "acting talent". I know that's intentional in some of a lot of these series but you definitely find the same people turning up again and again in seemingly unrelated shit films. Maybe there's an agency for that sort of thing?

It's really funny that I've not seen or heard a single positive review of this. From anyone. I'm glad it's shit as I could never take the conceit that Batman and Superman should live in the same universe, when they plainly don't. Oh, and as for the idea that there could be any sort of even fight between an impossibly fast, strong, impervious alien with all sorts of other super-powers and a weird bloke who dresses up in a bondage costume and runs round in the night...please. Don't get me started on that whole thing.

The Hateful Eight: 6.5/10 - Decent, but somewhat weak for Tarantino. Overlong, and takes too long to get going (the first hour feels like Tarantino directorially tossing himself off). Last hour saves it, good characters, but the plot is thin in reflection.

The Revenant: 8/10 - Long also, with really no more a complex plot than the above, but compelling. Builds suspense right until the end.

Deadpool: 5.5/10 - there is probably potential in this genre for a great film, but this wasn't it. Plot is dumb and predictable. Fights scenes just watching shapes on a screen. Dialogue is just irritating chatter. Opening credits the best part.

Watched some crackers recently. Some I'd seen before but some I watched for the first time.

Unforgiven: Slightly overrated but still quality. 8/10
Django Unchained: Tarantino back to his best. 9/10
Terminator 2: Almost perfect. Cast is amazing. 9/10
Rear Window: I love anything Hitchcock does. 10/10
My Dinner with Andre: Incredible. An absolute must see. 10/10 (seriously want to go beyond the five word limit. I could go on for hours about how good it is. When you hear the premise it sounds like its gonna be awful but I can't get over how good it is just to watch two guys having a conversation.)

I don't really get to see new films these days, but ITV's various incarnations have provided a couple of Bonds I wanted to catch up on:

Quantum of Solace: Nothing like as bad as I'd heard, so a nice surprise. Does what Bond films do and does it quite well. 7/10
Skyfall: Better still. Bond films should be exciting and tense, with peril and all that, but they have to have moments of levity too. 8/10

JimBentley wrote:I don't really get to see new films these days, but ITV's various incarnations have provided a couple of Bonds I wanted to catch up on:

Quantum of Solace: Nothing like as bad as I'd heard, so a nice surprise. Does what Bond films do and does it quite well. 7/10
Skyfall: Better still. Bond films should be exciting and tense, with peril and all that, but they have to have moments of levity too. 8/10

Skyfall was excellent I thought, although it was the first I'd seen in years since Madonna was fencing in one. Daniel Craig picking bogeys out of his arse may have been more entertaining than that one in some ways.

JimBentley wrote:I don't really get to see new films these days, but ITV's various incarnations have provided a couple of Bonds I wanted to catch up on:

Quantum of Solace: Nothing like as bad as I'd heard, so a nice surprise. Does what Bond films do and does it quite well. 7/10
Skyfall: Better still. Bond films should be exciting and tense, with peril and all that, but they have to have moments of levity too. 8/10

Skyfall was excellent I thought, although it was the first I'd seen in years since Madonna was fencing in one. Daniel Craig picking bogeys out of his arse may have been more entertaining than that one in some ways.

I watched a James Bond film on a flight a couple of years ago - pretty sure it was Skyfall, but they're all the same aren't they?! Anyway, I didn't think much of it. End of anecdote.

Minions: Way better than I expected. 8/10
Lethal Weapon 2: Buddy coppery at it's best. 9/10 (the scene in the South African embassy is the funniest scene of any movie as far as I'm concerned.)
Dazed and Confused: A simply brilliant ensemble piece. 9/10