HOW TO… Grieve well

Our journey through life may be unique, but we are all united by death and grief. So, what can we do to weather the loss? Grief psychotherapist, Julia Samuel, shares her views with Martha Roberts

Mind tricks

1 Understand the grief paradox

When you’re grieving, it’s natural to want to avoid things – whether it’s songs, scents or people. But confronting them enables us to heal. ‘The paradox of grief is that finding a way to live with the pain is what enables us to heal,’ says Samuel. Alternating between letting go (with distraction and soothing activities) and holding on, helps us to adjust to the reality of death.