My chronicle of my nearly fatal Saturn Return, and the misadventures I'm having since

Tag Archives: weddings

Wow, I can’t believe how quickly time flies. It’s been so long since I posted anything. I promise I’ve been thinking about you, even if I haven’t been in touch.
So where did I leave off?
I was headed to the UK and Spain to meet my future inlaws. It was such a great trip. Uk was having their heat wave and I actually managed to get sunburnt, which was very entertaining for an Aussie like me. Even though I was travelling to the UK during their summer, I still packed jeans and cardigans. Normally our winter is similar temperatures to their summer.
Anyway, my new family is so lovely. I was embraced immediately and made so welcome, to their family and their homes. I now have two of the most adorable nephews ever, two sisters and parents who are so similar to mine it’s nearly scary.
There was only one down side. Virgo man’s jealous streak came out during his sisters wedding. While I can’t deny it was my freudian slip that triggered it, it still really shocked me. It made me wonder if we would even still be together if I hadn’t fallen pregnant so early.
Anyway, let me explain. There was a general discussion happening around the table about girls changing their surnames when they get married. There were quite a few women there who had either gotten married recently or were engaged, and joking about how soon none of them would be their old name. I turned to Virgo man and told him for the first time in my life, I was really looking forward to changing my name when we married. (With any other boyfriend I’ve had, I was not inclined to change my surname). Unfortunately, I said the wrong name. I said Aries chef’s name by accident.
He looked at me strangely. It took me a few moments to realise. Then the earth opened up and swallowed me whole. What a F@$#*ing idiot. He stopped speaking to me for the rest of the reception. I found him in our hotel room an hour later. I apologised for the hundredth time and he let rip. That he felt he couldn’t trust me. He was the only one giving up anything, sacrificing anything for this relationship and I clearly wasn’t serious about us.
Seriously? I know, it was a major slip up on my behalf. And I don’t even know where it came from. I truly hadn’t thought about Aries chef in weeks, unless it was in passing when Virgo man was doing something wonderful for me like rubbing my feet and I thought “How lucky am I to have found someone this sweet, Aries chef would never be doing this for me”.
He’s the only one sacrificing anything? Do you know what is happening to my body right now? Let alone my emotions, my brain, my career, my finances?
A truce was called. We moved on. But every now and then I wonder if a jealous person can ever get past that personality trait. Is it my responsibility to prove my reliability – over and over again? I believe it is his to resolve his issues from the past. I don’t believe that I am untrustworthy. I’ve never cheated on a boyfriend. I can be flirty. I’m incapable of lying or even fibbing, I have no poker face. He can get cranky if mail gets delivered to the house addressed to Aries chef. I tried to point out that he hadn’t changed all of his mailing addresses either, wasn’t that just a man thing not a deliberate attempt to stay in my life, but apparently that wasn’t the same.
Anyway. Enough complaining. 99% of the time life is going great.
More life updates later.