Saturday, July 26, 2014

I´ve had a wonderful week where I´ve been off work and taking care of my boys and enjoying the hot summer weather we have here right now with temperatures over +30 degrees! Wow=)

Haven't been this hot here since I was pregnant with Seth back in 2001. I still remember that HOT and heavy summer since I at my highest pregnancy weight weighed in at 90 kilos…puh! A lot of fluids of course but still, it was the heaviest I´ve been ever and I hope never again.

I am such an energetic person who loves to move fast. At work, I don´t walk slow, I walk fast all the time. And I´ve always been like that. Fast forward, going from one spot to another and at work I have always disliked to sit around doing nothing. So my summer job at the elderly home suits me perfect, since there´s always someone who needs help and time sure flies.

As you all know I love to exercise and now I´ve found the perfect exercise for me that really gives me that kick I need to push myself over and over. Crossfit! I started in november last year and the improvement I´ve done is magical. Not only have I lost lots of weight but also I start to get muscles and a strength that is awesome! Our bodies are made to work and if you like to really SWEAT and work super hard but with lots of team spirit around you - do crossfit=)

And not only do I get the best exercise but also I´ve met some amazing people at my gym and to get up there, getting a hug from them all before we start exercising is such a nice feeling and make me never wanna quit going there. How many gym´s have THAT team feeling??=)

I worked yesterday afternoon/evening and have some days coming before summer is ended and I hit university. I´ve loved to work at this place and I sure hope I can continue working there during my school and summer breaks. It helps me becoming a good nurse to be a part of this and see how our care of elderly works. So I thank my boss for letting me be a part of it this summer=)

Last weekend me, Johan and the kids (except for Seth who is a teenager and prefer to be with his older friends=) went to Hembygdsparken in Ängelholm. This is a great place for kids and it doesn´t cost any entrance so perfect for everyone. Here they have a huge playground with different areas for different ages to play in and then it´s also an animal park with animals such as hen, ducks, pigs, goats, horses, deer and many more. The kids love it and while me and Mio walked around one of the ducks felt like taking a nice bath in the little bath bowl and I captured it:

Here he/she comes to the bowl

Oh, this is sooo nice

Yay, I can fly=)

Look how clean and cute I am now=)

Such a lovely moment to watch and the pure joy afterwards when he/she felt good and not so hot anymore=)

Of course I took some more photos for you, here you go:

Soooo, some from last weeks stuff=) This weekend will be about family today and then off to work tomorrow. I´m also finishing some lyrics I´m writing for a song to be recorded for something in the coming weeks and I´m actually writing the lyrics in Swedish! And it feels good=) Fun to try out new stuff!

About my headline: You are the maker of your own destiny?

Well, I mean that if you want something done or changed - don´t sit and wait for things to happen! Go out there and start the change! If you want to change your body - start exercising, change your food, take a personal trainer and so on..

If you want a new career - check how to become it, then make a plan, apply to university, take courses, go for auditions (if music or stage jobs), network to get in contact with others, apply even for a job that you haven´t got any education for (sometimes you can get a job even without proper education if you really show you want to work hard to learn) and so on..

For me: I take new decisions all the time and I also am a very outspoken person so yesterday I put down some stuff to one I work with to get things rolling since nothing ever happens. If people don´t answer you or caring of your work, push and make them HAVE to do their work.

Cause it´s YOU and no one else who make YOUR own destiny in this life and believe me- life is to short to spoil on the wrong people or things.

A long blog post but that´s to make up for the lack of blog posts lately=)

Monday, July 14, 2014

At the moment I feel so blessed cause I have gotten a really nice summer job at an elderly home where I really enjoy working. My collegues and the sweet care takers are just wonderful=)

And I also got in to the university and 3 years of studying to be a NURSE! Yay!!! So damn happy! It´s a dream coming true and through my life I´ve had so many different jobs but I have always longed to help people and feel that I do something GOOD for others and a job that is more about heart and head than surface.

Being in the entertainment business has good sides, for sure, but for me personally, there are also many bad sides. I´m a bit tired of people trying to just take your money, who doesn't care about friendship and only think of what they can win in every situation. It´s a man´s world and it´s necessary to be tough and have really strong elbows and I do, but I also really care for others and to feel a companionship and trust in others I put my career in to there hands.

I have also had a hard time with the demands to look a certain way, dress a certain way and BE a certain way cause I am and will always be ME. What you see is what you get=)

I will always LOVE to do music, that´s not what I mean, BUT I have gotten so many negative bruises and scars the last years in the business that my love for this has slowly taken away the JOY from it and in the darkest and most lonely moments on tour, all I wanted was a job where I won´t always be judged and criticized whatever I do. Cause believe me, if you have a job where you always have people looking at you, trying to find something wrong with your achievement, even how strong you are and how good confidence you have, it will be a hard ride. Some will survive and think it´s worth it and ok with it but there are so many who just don´t want to continue.

Here in Sweden there´s so many artists who get a fast break through and things spin so fast, the record labels push hard to get them out to play and feel albums and they do a year, maybe 2 and then they are just gone. Burnt out, stressed, lack of motivation and so on and in some cases they come back but in a way where they themselves are more in charge and in a smaller way with a smaller label, or they just fall in to a "normal" job.

I have read so many times when a musician or an artist "complain" about how hard it can be to be a musician. - No money earned, no record sales cause so many download illegal, no promoters paying enough to get a band or an artist to play offering so bad payment that it´s almost as if the band or musician themselves need to pay to play that venue.

Every time someone says anything that its hard or so on - the first thing non-musicians say is:

- But your work is what you LOVE - it´s not like a "normal" job, you are SO lucky cause the rest of us have to do boring jobs…and so on..

I have always worked in '"normal" jobs to make my living since music has always been so hard to be able to live on. Then I had the privilege to do it as my job for some years so I think I am right to say that NO, being a musician is NOT always easy, fun and just like working with your hobby. And in these days when record sales are going down and there are just to much music to choose from, it´s even harder.

Now this is not meant to be a "bu-hu" poor me statement, no=) I am blessed and I still love to make music and will continue doing that, but I will focus on my studies to get a good education and a profession I can have the rest of my working life and if I can do some gigs in weekends, some festivals I´ll do that and a new album when Ear music feel they want to put it out=)

Now time to sleep=) Thanks for reading and all my love for you who are there for me whatever I do and whoever I choose to be.

Monday, July 07, 2014

Back home from Toranda festival where we played a very late gig in the middle of the night, after EUROPE and indoors and it was a really pleasant and nice relaxed atmosphere where many danced and enjoyed the music=)