On keeping your feet dry, and the various consequences of failing to do so:

When your feet start to bleed - and boy, will they ever - don't panic. The hole that appears to be eating its way into the space between your 4th and 5th toes on your right foot won't go any deeper than a full centimeter (you know this because you stuck your finger inside of it and then measured the extent of the bloody seepage on your pinkie finger… the hole is that wide and deep).

On the luxurious scrotal fluff of male woolly monkeys:

Once you've cupped in your hands the magnificent fluffiness that is the scrotal tuft of the male woolly monkey (for data purposes, you perv; this is a putative signal of sexual selection and must be measured!), you will never again be able to discuss it without subconsciously making the above unfortunate hand gesture.

This includes while giving professional talks.

In front of dozens of colleagues.

Who will never forget.

Ever.

On worry displays in New World monkeys:

The juvenile white-faced capuchin (Cebus capucinus) worry face is indisputably the most adorable worry face of all the worry faces.