It’s a ranting sort of week around here. Apparently colds remove my usual veneer of patience along with all the moisture in my body through my nose. Who knew?

The topic of the day is stupid drug packaging. I have a news flash for the makers of over the counter cold medicines: they are bought and used by SICK PEOPLE. Sick people do not want to have to lift a flap to find the dosage interval on the fourth panel (!) of the drug facts. They want to know how much good time they have before they have to engage in arcane rituals of swearing at foil tough enough to resist teeth and require scissors to open. The other cold medicine I was taking yesterday comes in those little bubble things. The ones that shred the edge of your thumbnail as you attempt to peel back more stubborn foil to pop out the pills.

See what I mean about the patience?

Now, I have some issues that are particular to me. I take medications for my depression. Every cold medicine in the world has a version of “Taking this with MAOI depression medications will result in global meltdown and possibly the end of the world” on the package somewhere in a much more prominent position than the dosage. You would think, then, that the kindly pharmacists who package my depression medications would indicate in large letters “THIS IS NOT AN MAOI DRUG” or the alternative. But no. I happen to know, through exhaustive paging through websites that my particular antidepressants are not MAOI drugs, but I had to do the footwork.

Did I mention that it is sick people who need to take cold medicine? People who do not have the time between swipes of the nose to surf website after website for an extremely important small factoid that could easily be put on the bottle? I’m not saying that the package should list all the drug interaction warnings, but it’s the COMMON COLD for God’s sake!

Thank you for listening. I will now return to my tissues and fluids and rest for the next several hours until it is time for my next dose of cold medicine.