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11.04.2011

Choices...

{This is post has been delayed for several days. I'm not one to share my opinions on such matters, or other slightly touchy issues, so openly. After much though and consideration I decided to go ahead and post it.}

Babies - they are a beautiful image of God's grace for His people. He created these tiny little creatures for us to cuddle, to hold and to raise. He created a wonderful thing called pregnancy. (Despite the 4 months I was sick, I LOVED being pregnant. I know not everyone feels the same way!) He also created the messy, beautiful miracle of birth.

Today I read a review/interview with Ricki Lake and her new film More Business of Being Born. I watched the first film (same title minus the "more"). I watched the film while pregnant with Claire. While it did open my eyes to many good things about pregnancy and child birth, I also found the film to be very one sided. It was extremely negative towards birthing in a hospital with an OB. This was just my take on the film and what I took away from it. I am not a film critic, and I am not trying to be one. These were merely my feelings after the film.

In the interview I read today with Ricki, she stated that she is not trying to ask "people to do things my way. I just want women to do what's best for them." (American Baby, November 2011) Now, I have not seen her newest film (not yet out) but I did feel from watching her first film that a woman who chooses to have her baby in a hospital with an OB is naive or uneducated about her options. That "what's best for them" is not having an OB deliver your baby. Again, these are not her words, just how I felt after watching the film. I feel that Spencer and I researched various kinds of birth options when it came to everything from OBs/midwifes, prenatal care, positions during birth, easy laboring ideas, pain medication, medical interventions... the list goes on and on. I also feel that we made the right decisions based on the knowledge we had at the end of all of it.

Our experience with Claire's birth was totally positive. The only thing I would change, in hindsight, would be the IUPC and the Electronic Fetal Moniter. The pain for me was insanely intense and it left Claire with a sore on the top of her head which is now a scar. I felt that the care we received from the hospital not only met but exceeded our expectations. It was phenomenal. They let us make the space our own. We had one-to-one care from the most amazing nurses. They were knowledgeable, experienced, caring, they advocated for us and dispelled any unnecessary fears we had. As happy as I was to take Claire home, a tiny piece of me was sad to leave the hospital. It felt safe and homey. I knew that any emergency care we would need was right there where we are.

As a mother, a new mother, I can appreciate what women would desire for their idea of a perfect birth. I would hope that most moms put the importance of their child's health and their own above all else. I strongly advise any expectant, or planning to expect, women to do their own research. And to look at both sides of the coin. Not one more then the other. And follow your gut feeling. As a pregnant woman, I received advise left, right and center! It was overwhelming to know what was right, what was a little off and keep in mind that it was all given with the best intent. (That last bit was the hardest to remember.)

Not all doctors are treating you with a dinner appointment that you are inconveniencing. Not all nurses are out to drug you to make you be less mean to them, or to make their job easier. Not every OB wants to do a C-section to make some more coin or to get home to make it home in time for the child's Christmas pageant they had promised to be at. In my experience, I had an amazing team of medical professionals who were there for me 100%, encouraged me, encouraged Spencer, and shared in the joy of the birth of our sweet baby girl. I felt so calm in their care, that even when Claire was not breathing right away, I didn't worry a bit. I knew that I had competent people there to help her.

So whether you choose a home birth with you and your husband, a birthing center with a midwife, or you deliver in the ambulance on the way to the hospital - keep your focus (your baby!) If you want to do it au natural, or you want the anesthesiologist to meet you in the parking lot - remember that the baby is in charge here! What you have laid out in your mind, or typed out in your birth plan may not be in baby's plan at all! There is a beautiful adventure ahead of you. Read, educate yourself and be flexible!

{*These are only my thoughts and feelings about pregnancy and birth based on my personal experience. What you have experienced will lead you to your own opinions on the matter. I am not out to change your mind, merely encourage you to trust your intuitions, discuss the matters with your partner and do your own research to educate yourself and your partner.*}

3 comments:

Great post Michelle, I am so overly thankful for the hospital in all 3 of our guys births. Each was very different but especially for Tyler and Travis things may have looked very different for us if we hadn't been close to a hospital.

Having been forced to watch the Business of Being Born for a class last year (and being somewhat traumatized, to be honest), I understand the one-sided thing. The whole movie felt way off-balance. Thanks for sharing your heart :) When I'm preggers I'll keep your advice in mind!

Michelle, I love this post. you are awesome. I agree, the movie is definitely one-sided. And while you know which side I lean too, I love what you are saying here, and I couldnt be happier for all the things you discovered in your birth journey! You were amazing and Im sooo proud of you for birthing your beautiful girl the way you did! love you chick-a-dee!

Hi! My name is Michelle and I am a stay-at-home mom of two little girls and wife to Spencer, a chiropractor. Here you will find some of our family adventures, reviews of products, some strong women in business as well as recipes. Leave me a note and say hello!