Mommy Dearest

She is my mother,
that indomitable, unattainable goal.
A woman of iron and silk and unforgiving praise.
She is the measure of all that
I will never be.
She sees me and looks right through me.
She loves me with a barbed wire heart,
chaining me to a relentless yearning
of approval.
I will beat my head
endlessly against a brick wall
if you simply say you love me,
say you're proud of me,
say I'm good.
All measure of self-worth is wrapped
in the one woman who loves me enough
to tear me apart.