Icebreaker Edition
After spending a long cold winter slaving away at our anonymous
location, we’re finally ready to “break the ice” and present you with
the complete 1st edition of the new school newspaper! The journey
began round about a term ago, when we were brainstorming
names for the newspaper. We eventually decided to have a competition in which students were required to come up with a name
and design the masthead for the newspaper. Ross Fourie’s design
was chosen as the winner. Ross and Mrs Pienaar then edited and
finalised the masthead and created what we have on our front
page. Thank you for your hard work. We, the team, are happy to
welcome you to the first edition of ‘The Wall’. ENJOY!

MASTHEAD COMPETITION
A competition to design the Masthead for our DSG and College Newspaper
was seized up by a number of talented graphic designers. The entries were
original, creative and showed amazing effort. After careful deliberation among
the Newspaper Team, Ross Fourie, in Grade 11, Upper was named the winner. In his design, he came up with the name “The Wall,” the place where the
DSG and St Andrew’s College campuses combine. His design included an eloquent font and clever backing image.
Ross Fourie won the chance to have an in depth workshop, with expert graphic designer, Mrs Pienaar. During the workshop, he learned new techniques,
and together, Ross and Mrs Pienaar came up with a modified version of the
Masthead, using a photograph of the Wall, taken by Evaan Ferreira.
2

Suggestsâ&#x20AC;Ś
What are the quirkiest search suggestions from the
popular search engine?

RORKE WILSON
3

DAILY NOTICE ~ FRIDAY ~ NOVEMBER 2013
NEWSFLASH: Always keep an eye out for beauty, it’s only when you look for it that you’ll find it. And remember, even cement mixing is an
art.
EVERYONE WHO DIDN’T READ YESTERDAY’S DAILY NOTICE:
Please meet outside admin this afternoon to schedule your disciplinary hearings. Headmaster’s offences are not tolerated.
ALL AUSTRALIAN EXCHANGES:
There’ll be a shearing tonight in Merriman for comb-over removal.

DETENTION LIST:

Armstrong

Espin

Ball R

Graham
Grade 10s
x365

Merriman

Mullins

Upper

Crew
e

Mr Ireland

Merriman

Knowling
Mama B

Espin
Mrs Preston

ACADEMIC
ST

1

TEAM MATHS WARCRIES:

Girls and boys must please meet tonight outside the maths centre to practice “I vow to thee Pythagoras” for Saturday’s fixture. Seniors caught
throwing calculators will be put on detention.
GRADE 11 LO:
Keep focused for these coming exams, they are the most important of your life. Also, your entire year’s worth of work is due this week.
RUSH BETWEEN CLASSES:
All students must please note that rush will be reduced to 3 minutes as of now. It’s cardio time.
GEOGRAPHY STUDENTS:
Please report to Upper Matie to explain what happened to the tornado.

MUSIC, DANCE & DRAMA
PIPE BAND:
There’s a meeting tonight in the band room. We’ll be cleaning the pipes.
CHAMBER CHOIR AUDITIONS:
Well done to Francis Christie for making the cut. Everyone else is out.
SPORT
DSG 1

ST

TEAM SPINNING:

Your 1st team tracksuits are ready to be picked up from the clothing exchange.
SAC 1ST TEAM CYCLING:
Fine, you too.
1st TEAM ROWING:
Don’t forget that this Wednesday is “Normal tracksuit day.”
MERRIMAN DSG:
Well done on winning athletics. Please report to the san for steroid testing.

OUTDOOR ED
GROUPS 1, 2, 3 & 5:
Remember to get lots of rest in preparation for Journey.
GROUP 4:

4

GENERAL
GRAHAM HOUSE BOYS:
Please collect your new house ties, badges, shirts, trousers, socks, beanies, scarves, umbrellas, winter jackets, jerseys and underwear from the
clothing exchange.
GRADE 11s:
Because of repeated incidents of people crossing the road before the man is green, Fountain 2014 has been cancelled.
SAC TUCKSHOP:
Due to snack inflation, the price of egg-and-bacons will be increasing to R29.95.
GYM COMMITTEE:
Anyone interested in joining the committee, we’ll be having all-night trials on Saturday.
DINING HALL NOTICE:
All boys don’t forget to wear your new construction helmets to dinner tonight in case the rest of the ceiling breaks too.
DSG SECURITY:
We have an emergency matric lockdown drill on Monday.
ANGLING CLUB:
All staff and pupils are reminded that angling club meetings and weekends take preference over exams and sport.
SAC MEAL TIMES:
18h00- None
18h10- Armstrong, Espin, Graham, Mullins, Upper, Merriman
18h20- None
18h30- None
DSG MEAL TIMES:
18h00- None
18h10- None
18h20- None
18h30- None
SAN NOTICE

APPOINTMENTS:
09h30 - Facial reconstruction

- J Lake

09h45 - Chin surgery

- V Rader

OFF SPORT: Graham House, DSG.
ABSENT: -Jonono X,

~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY ~
GRAHAM HOUSE & THE CHAPEL
ENJOY YOUR DAY!

5

Who is “I” ???
The newsteam was intrigued and almost flattered to receive a mysterious letter posted under Mr Coventry’s door and
addressed The Wall. The letter had a note attached that read:

This really sparked the interest of the team and one of the members took the task of reading the letter. It instantly sparked a debate. The team was immediately faced with a very big divide over whether we should publish it or not. We, as the news team clearly
stated: “The paper will be an outlet for College and DSG students to collaborate and express their views about the community,
school and school life.”
That being said this letter is published in the comments section and therefore The Wall does not take any responsibility for the content of this letter. The Wall also doesn’t support or reject the contents of this letter.

6

Hipsters – The modern-day witch hunt
By James Holmes

With their skinny jeans and scarves hidden beneath
school uniform, hipsters are difficult to spot on the
College and DSG campus, but don’t think they
aren’t there.
‘Hipsterism’ is a fairly recent phenomenon, based
mainly around going against what is considered
mainstream by the rest of society. As such, their
habits are often old-fashioned, but several years of
adaptation have turned many parts of being a hipster into a strange concoction of
both old and modern aspects of
living. Many hipsters, for example,
will condemn modern consumerism while checking the messages
on their iPhones. In fact, there are
several aspects of Hipsterism
which appear almost paradoxical.
At its core, Hipsterism is a counter
-culture movement, which advocates individualism, and yet there
is a standard manner in which all
hipsters dress: non-prescription
glasses and vintage scarves. In this
sense, Hipsterism is self-defeating,
since hipsters try to be different to
the rest of society by conforming
to each other.
Hipsters may be well camouflaged on our campus,
but there is another faction which is the complete
opposite: the hipster-burners. To hipsters, they
represent ‘haters’, but there seem to be more
burners than hipsters nowadays. Favourite quotes
of a burner include things like, “kill it with fire,” and
“burn them”, hence the name. Strangely enough,
however, there are a lot of similarities between
hipsters and burners. Burners are also narcissists.
Both consider themselves as better than modern

society – the mass majority who regularly fall for
advertising scams. Often burners are just as counter-culture as hipsters, they take pride in simply
being better than thou. Some burners at College
drink just as much tea as hipsters, and secretly love
scarves. The biggest and most obvious difference
though, is that to the burners, hipsters are included
in the idiot-majority. In fact, they are even worse,
because their entire philosophy is hypocritical.
Burners have had a massive effect on
modern-day hipsters. Many have
gone into hiding, and don’t openly
admit to being hipsters anymore. I
suspect that many burners are actually ex-hipsters, turncoats who
switched sides when the ridicule became too much. But should hipsters
be burned? When the burners started calling for the flames to be lit, I
found myself standing up for the
rights of hipsters. Hipsterism is a paradox. Many hipsters are actually exswag followers – morons in disguise.
And wearing glasses you don’t need
is simply stupid. But it doesn’t
matter. Hipsterism is about more
than that. Hipsters stand for something that actually makes sense: going against the
herd. And even if hipsters have left one herd only
to join another, they have every right to do so if
they honestly believe the hipster-herd is better
than the mainstream. Hipsterism isn’t the same as
individualism; it isn’t about being different to absolutely everyone, just being different to the masses.
Even if we think skinny jeans are stupid, we are all
hipsters in our own way. We want to be unique,
but we also want to feel like we belong.
7

When you just donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t
know the answer ...

8

It’s a Meme Life...
Maths exam
question 1.

Do you even lift?

Maths exam

Mr Pienaar.

question 2.

(Shaved edition)

Mr Jackson.

Rotting all night.
We see you
Frew.

Dining Hall boerewors.

End of crosscountry.

Inter-House art
submission.

Yawning in
Assembly.

Mr Redfern.

KTTHT ‘13

9

For the love of words
By Sheldan Dolf

So what is the Cornish Society. “Huh?” “Well, um, (scratches head) isn’t it a
meeting held at that old building- the Cornish hall?” “Is it where you discuss
Greek gods?” “Cornish, isn’t that a pie?” These are some of the common responses that are received from College and
DSG pupils.
Most people just strike a blank, which makes
me wonder how much we really know about
what is going on in our very own schools.
Below is the dictionary definition of ‘cornish’:
Cornish plural of Cor·nish
Noun
1. The people of Cornwall collectively.
2. The extinct Brythonic language of Cornwall
Definition from: Dictionary.com

A good guess is that it comes from the second definition:
that it is a language that is spoken by an ‘elite’ group of people. The language, in this case, is actually poetry. Does it
have a poetic name? Is it symbolic or, like most things at our
school, was it named after someone? After looking around in
the Archives, Mrs. Andrew and I found one Old Andrean that
has a good chance of having the society named after him.
This is Mr T Cornish [Housemaster Armstrong 1902, Lower
(now Merriman) 1903-1904 and Espin 1907]. The Old Merriman, Upper and Graham Dining Hall were named after him.
The function of the Cornish Society is, simply put, the appreciation of poetry. We come together on Sunday nights and
talk about anything under the sun.
Checklist for a Sunday night:
A poem that fits the theme, either self-written or handpicked
Your mug (for those cold winter evenings…)
…and every now and again the odd pair of socks.
It seems that the function of the earlier Cornish Society was
for the appreciation of words rather than Poetry. The first
entrance of the Cornish society into the school magazine
was in July 1943. The Society spoke about plays, books, even
literature and at times watched plays as a group! From the

beginning it was a closed society, then accepting no more
than 30 members.
The first 8 topics covered by the Cornish society were:









Malnutrition
Talk on Mission Station( Church based school)
The third one was a one man show. This was about
the education in Nazi Germany
Modern Drama
Famous Indian Poets
Renaissance of Art in Florence of Art
Macbeth and Shakespeare
Choice of words.

The Cornish Society, interestingly enough started as a magazine and I quote The Andrean, December 1944 “The content
of the magazine is of a satisfactory standard. “
We, the present Cornish Society, are hoping that the Cornish
will be a magazine that will second only to that of the Andrean. When and how it became a society about poetry is still a
mystery.
In today’s Cornish society, members are, at times requested
to write their own poetry and to recite it. And here is proof
that at the Cornish Society we in fact don’t make pies.
10

The Poetry of Cornish...
Moon and Tide
The stars confess like scars
Against the body of night
The moon gleams
A shadowlike grace ‘pon the ocean—a face, pale as a bloodless page
So the ocean, enraged, parts its seams to dark froth-lain sheets,
To escape the moon’s white love,
Cast as light in reaching rays,
Drawn like moonlit reins,
As the ocean lays upon the bay
Its tale of escapist love,
So the ocean calls, into the wind an out to all
As it rolls towards the moon
And there upon the sand trapped in dark
Is the remnant of moon-tied love.

Simphiwe Zondani

The Meeting
A peaceful blood red fire flows through the crack in the wall

The star shaped sparkle... The dim lit left alone light

Dancing on my tired frail fingers

Kept alive only by made up memories

Silence yawns as it steps out to meet dark

Yet true or false, memories all fade

They Jolt, a sound, quiver scratch quiver

Fade at the meeting of silence and night

The star shaped sparkles swiftly sow their seeds
And with the noise there goes light
For now is the meeting of silence and night

Their seeds are sown the star shaped sparkles flicker
My eyelids fall as my pupils rise
And try as I may, try as I might I won't stop the meeting of

Embracing a dim glow as others darken
Clawing at last light, it leeps!
As hard as it might to stop the meeting of silence and night

11

College/DSG Dictionary
Phrase:
“How old are we?” or “How old am I?”
Meaning: It is a rhetorical question that implies you are way too important, good or special to
be doing a particular thing.
Origin: Comes from the traditional view that the older one is the more respect and power you
have. In a sense you become more important the more you age. Therefore asking others how old
you are implies that you are too old to be doing the particular task.
Example: “Ey man, how old are we for wearing our blazer to assembly”.
j.g.

12

Artists in our Midst
Some highlights from the SAC Inter-house art.

Myles Brown

Mateo Rapaglia

Bradley Jackson

Robbie Fietze

13

News team

Meet the

ASSEMBLE!!!

Uli Ratsibe

Unknown to most of the entertainment industry, Uli wrote the lyrics to
‘Wrecking Ball’, but his work was stolen by Miley Cyrus. Uli maintains that
he first intended the song to be a protest chant for construction workers.

James Holmes
James’ greatest phobia is the
Grinch, because he secretly
still believes in Santa Claus
and Rudolph. He also enjoys
visiting the two unmarked
graves where his biceps are
reportedly buried.

Rorke Wilson
One of Rorke’s eyeballs is 1.1242
times larger than the other, so for
him, sleeping in class is a medical
condition rather than a punishable
offence. Are you jealous yet?

Tali Alexandre
Tali is the world record holder for the backwards 100m sprint. She says that her sporting
career is the main reason she doesn’t want to
grow a beard.

Simon Quinn

Abongile Dongwana

He is a very active member of the
club… sort of. He is always filled
with ideas and he always carries
them out– like the interview articles… exactly.

Few people know that Abongile “ab’ Dongwana got his nickname
because he only has one ab. But don’t feel sorry for him, because
he has the biggest 1-pack anyone’s ever seen.

14

Evaan Ferreira

Team

Few people know that Evaan had an
Afro until he was 13, and that it was the
size of a basketball. After that, he had
to shave it because it ruined the acoustics of his singing.

Mary Gouws
Some say that Judgement Day will be the day Mary
gets less than 99% for a maths test, so if you want to
live, don’t distract her while she’s studying.

Aaron Adriaan
Aaron’s favourite TV series used to be Gossip
Girl. When asked why, his reply was: “That
was a dark time of my life, you don’t want to
know.”

Thamu Mnyulwa
Though no one will admit it,
Thamu’s art was the inspiration for
Zapiro, his hairstyle influenced Martin Luther King Jr. and his chest led
to the design of the first M1 battle
tank. He was also Quentin Tarantino’s first choice for Pulp Fiction
before Samuel L. Jackson had to
take his place.

‘I’

Gina Bennett
Gina openly admits to wanting to become a
teacher after school. She wants to come back
to DSG, be the housemistress of Espin, teach
LO, email people with her iPad, stay up all
night, organise her daily planner and tell stories of her sporting career while at school.

Sheldan Dolf
Sheldan has been addicted to
tea bags since acting in Siener.
Remember, if you want something from him, his favourites are
Five Roses and FreshPak.

Have you read I’s article?
It’s pretty messed up.
Since we don’t know who
I is, all we can really say
about him/her is that he/
she should probably visit
that new psychologist
where the old gym used
to be.

15

What to do if

ZOMBIES

Attack

SAC and DSG campus.
By Rorke Wilson

It’s the middle of the night; you’re awakened by
your groaning cube-mate. But wait… Your cubemate is out for the weekend, and that groaning
does not sound human at all. So that could only
mean one thing: Zombies. You quickly jump out of
your bed and run for the door, you catch your foot
on a loose tile and you’re sent sprawling across the
cold hard floor. Suddenly an icy hand clutches
around your ankle. This is it; this is the end for you.

Now, you need to quickly wake-up a friend. Choose
well: your friend needs to be relatively fit, unselfish
and a quick runner, just not a quick as yourself, you
need someone to outrun when you’re being chased
down by brain-hungry zombies. Now you’ll need to
dodge the incoming hordes of zombies long enough
to make it to shelter. When choosing a shelter, it’ll
need to fulfil the following criteria:

Would you like this to happen to you? Obviously
not! With the help of this easy to follow, step-bystep guide you can make sure that in the unlikely
event of zombies ever invading SAC or DSG campus, you will be fully prepared.







Well fortified
Weapons at your disposal
Only accessible from one side
And lastly, FOOD

You’ve been awoken by the restless moans of the
un-dead. The first thing you do is grab the three
zombie necessities: running shoes (They’re called
the walking dead, not the jogging dead), an easily
movable hockey stick (if not, a cricket bat could be
used) and a bandana (if exposed zombie brain fluids/blood you could become infected with the virus).

16

The best places to go:
Shooting range
Upsides:
Gates on three sides, walls on one.
Small entrance (zombies can’t get in quick
enough and it’s easy to kill them when they’re
coming in a single file line.)
Guns, guns and bows.
Mrs Morton will most probably be there
Downsides:
No food








The armoury
Upsides:
Few windows
Guns (They may not work but you can still do
some major skull-smashing)
Small, strong door.
Walls on all sides
Downsides:
No food







Dining Hall
Upsides:


Food



Downsides:
Lots of windows and doors



You won’t be the only one getting food.

Now that you’ve got your shelter you’ll have to
make sure it’s well fortified. Take any large objects
and use them to block the entrance. If you find any
guns only use them in when really necessary, a gunshot is like a dinner bell for every zombie within a
kilometre radius.
It may seem like a good idea at the time but building a fire is the last thing you want to do, Zombies
are drawn to anything that may suggest humans are
in the area.
Now you’ll have to try to make your way to the army base. This shouldn’t be too much of a hassle as
we are on the outskirts of Grahamstown. Once
you’re in the base, you’re sure to be safe, but bring
food as they might not let you in if you don’t have
anything to contribute.

Goodnight, and if there
is a zombie apocalypse:
Good Luck.
SAC
DSG

Base

A map showing the best route from SAC and DSG to the Army Base

17

Saying YES to the Dress
It’s a tradition that has lasted since the school started,
but maybe it is time for a change? The typical DSG white
dress is something that our school has been known for.
Every year girls cascade towards the fountain in beautiful dresses, each one unique, but all of them white. DSG
girls have always worn white dresses as a symbol of purity, the Virgin Mary in white. But sometimes it‘s time for
a change in tradition, a breath of fresh air. White dresses
are chic, elegant and give off an air of grace which our
school is known for. Ultimately we are educated in an
environment where we learn these social graces and,
therefore, the white dress depict the true image of a DSG
girl.
Fresh faced and clean, the girls in matric always manage
to pull off these beautiful white dresses and some love
wearing them. But what if white isn’t everyone’s colour?
What if it doesn’t flatter a girl and they spend their
whole matric dance feeling self-conscious rather than
beautiful? Every girl deserves to look beautiful and spe-

cial on the night of her matric dance and what if white
just doesn’t do it for her? Girls should not feel forced to
wear something they do not want to and stick to an old
tradition in a time when colour is fashionable and beautiful and helps embody individualism. However, this is
only one side of the argument. The other is that the DSG
tradition is a great thing, and that our school is known
for the beautiful white dresses that the girls wear for
their Ante and Matric dances.
Some girls believe that white is different, elegant and
that every single girl looks beautiful on the night. Each
dress seems to be unique. There just seems to be something special and almost magical about our white matric
dance dresses. So, is the white dress something that
should stay a tradition or should we embrace the colours
of the rainbow? So to the matric girls of 2014 and everyone else, do you want white, or is it time for a change?
By “Gnat Nib Teen”

18

19

Past, Present, Future.
What has changed over the last 100 years at SAC

?

1913, one hundred years ago.
This year, 100 years ago, the school was vibrant. It had unity and friendships like the ones we enjoy today. It had the rugby side
our grandparents and great grandparents were part of, but one thing was missing: the heart of the campus, the place that the
school would soon revolve around: the Memorial Chapel: the place where the names of the fallen would rest.
The laying of the cornerstone was a problem at first. It was delayed and in the beginning, the school had only £4,000 of what they
needed for the building. However The original chapel was designed by Mrs. Armstrong and has now become the arc.

1963 fifty years ago.
As written in The Andrean of 1963, “The countryside around is now in its full autumn glory.” At this time the construction of
Graham house was completed and opened it its doors at the beginning of the term to its foundation members. On the 10 th of
March, the house was blessed and the staff, friends and parents of the school were entertained. Also in March of 1963, Holland
house was finished and became the junior house for Mullins.
Many of the clubs and societies that we enjoy today either from DSG or College, were introduced around this time: The Alchemists, the drama club, and the Cornish society.

2013 the present.
In comparison to the past 100 years at College, a lot has changed. We’ve put in place wonderful teaching
methods, we have resources and facilities others have never even had the opportunity to use. We now have
technology and a wider variety of sports, but we still have the old College, the bond of brothers. So here is
our history from past to present, let’s keep it going for another hundred years.
By Aaron Adriaan

20

Meanwhile
After
Cross-Country...

21

What does the Fox say?
In a week we saw her rise to new heights with 200 followers and then fall back to only 33. In a week, we saw
her give us reason to laugh, cry and be angry; but who is
she? Or is it even a she? Who is Virginia Fox and what is
going to happen to her?
Let’s rewind back to 2010. We had someone back then
and it was on Facebook. She uploaded controversial
news on the happenings between the two schools under
the alias of Virginia Fox. She created a shock wave and
suddenly everybody wanted to know what happened
and wanted to get the juicy gossip. Once the heads of

Mr Wright and Mr Redfern have offered the following
joint comment:
“The investigation into who is responsible for this account is being taken seriously and has already been a
lengthy and detailed process. A team of forensic investigators from Pretoria was appointed to try to trace the
account.
Should the Vfox account re-emerge, the investigators
will be able to trace the origins of the account, given the
information they already have.
This incident has been extremely
hurtful within our community and
the cowardly actions of the individuals involved are strongly condemned. “

DSG and College found out, a threat was issued, that if
you “liked” the Virginia Fox page on Facebook you
would be punished and just like that, more and more
people clicked the unlike button and ran away. Eventually, the culprit’s identity was established and faced the
disciplinary that action followed.

They went on to say, “The people behind this account
need to understand that if they are identified, they will
face not only the most severe sanction within the school
system but litigious (legal) action from parents in our
community who are very angry and upset by the comments posted.”

The storm that was caused by the first Virginia Fox cannot even compare to the social media hurricane being
cause by @Vfoxthesecond.

Our attitude towards it is the only thing that matters
and it’s not something to take light-heartedly.

Now we have @VfoxTheSecond who in one of her first
tweets said “I have returned! People thought I was dead
and buried but I have been resurrected and I’m here to
stay #lateforsomepeople.” Has there been a passing of
the torch between the two? Whoever this person is,
they have the ability ruin a reputation with a few quickly
typed words and a click on the post button, but like the
news in some newspapers, is it the truth?

Now with the news of people being sent home and relationships falling apart, platonic or not, Virginia Fox has
created a shock wave and some people have felt the
effects. The question is, how long will it take until the
root of the storm is found? To Virginia Fox: you have
created something powerful and you have some credit
for that , but you have also created something that has
hurt many and destroyed relationships and for that I
discredit you. Maybe it’s time for a fox hunt?
-Anon

Some people have thought of @VfoxTheSecond:
“It’s not meant for people to take it seriously”
“Cruel and stupid”
“Funny — as long as it doesn’t happen to me”

22

Getting Silly
Kenton, streaking and gym- these are all
words that are associated with 3rd term and
the infamous Silly Season that comes with it.
What is it, then, that
causes our two schools to
suddenly and seemingly
unnecessarily erupt into
what is a frenzy of bad behaviour and inappropriate
incidents that often leave
all those involved with a
sour taste in their mouths
and for some, regret in their hearts?
It is undoubtedly a combination of beautifully dangerous factors that include the ending
of the school year, which brings with it the
enticement of the sunny December holidays,
the change of season from a bleak winter into a warm and carefree spring and the nearing of that oh so wonderful pinnacle to every
year while in high school at St Andrews or
DSG that is Kenton Third Term Half-Term.
Over these 5 days, or rather more importantly, the 4 nights that one may spend in this undeniably necessary haven, one can expect to
be exposed to a brilliant display of intense
underage drinking and other goings on that
take place at the raucous and hormone
fuelled house parties. For staff members and
parents alike, it is impossible to translate to
you how special this time is for us and how
simply fantastic it is. Kenton, in short, is a
place where friendships are forged, where
friendships are shattered and where reputations are born. Kenton is everything.

Kenton aside, it must be noted that Silly Season has kicked off to an intense and drama
fuelled start with the resurfacing of the now
terribly infamous Virginia
Fox twitter account that
went about documenting
the activities of certain
people, commenting on
apparent bad decisions
and exposing the secrets
that some were trying to
keep as just that. While it
is understandable that some of the exposed
are upset and distraught at the publication of
their specific story, whether it be true or not,
the rest of the school has seemed to enjoy
the drama.
Scolleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Memorial Service was another classic event that helped to burst through the
gates of boring normality into the luscious
green pasture that is Silly Season. Here, the
Espin Matrics, along with invited guests and
other mourners celebrated the life of what
was a dignified and proud hamster who was
tragically killed, some will profess it was done
maliciously so, by a previous Espin Matron.
For Matrics, the end is near. While I would
never suggest that you stay out of fun, I
would, however, suggest that you stay out of
trouble. In closing, I must encourage you to
make the most of these fun times while staying out of trouble. In other words, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get
caught.
By Simon Quinn

23

New Boy’s Noise
“Silly season here at College has begun.
As I am a new boy it is the 1st one for me, but I
have heard a lot of interesting things about it
like the Matrics will have to run down naked
from the DSG fountain and just streak and have
a jam. Like today I saw a matric pulling his pants
down and flashing to a couple of DSG girls…”

24

Mixed Emotions
Matrics are about to leave and there will be one less grade at
the school. Obviously the matrics are experiencing mixed emotions. But we as the youngsters to them are going to miss
them very much, the leadership they have produced means a
lot of members in our grade look up to them. But we as new
boys are also experiencing mixed emotions, as in the joy of not
waking up so early not fagging and not going to town to do
stuff for the matrics, but the thought of not having a tutor
A.K.A â&#x20AC;&#x153;Fag masterâ&#x20AC;? is also pretty dramatic, because they have
guided us in the right direction in knowing what to expect in
certain times at College, and what to do when these situations
approach. So I wish all the matrics best of luck for the future
and to succeed in what they do.

25

Your Facebook Identities #1:

The Facebook Snob
By Tali

Facebook Snob Characteristic #1: Ignores
friend requests from people they know or
are related to.
This doesn't apply to ignoring the friend request of a psycho ex-boyfriend or someone
you've never met. But, if you ignore the
friend request of your great-aunt, friend at
church or someone else you really know, you
might be considered a Facebook snob. It really depends on the circumstances. If someone
you know hasn't done something to harm
you, and you just don't want to connect with
them, you might be the qualifications of a Facebook snob.
Facebook Snob Characteristic #2: Accepts a
friend request, then acts like they never existed.
Whenever I get a new friend request, I always
try to make some effort to reconnect with the
person. It could be as simple as commenting
on their recent Facebook status, or "liking"
their kids photos. Or, it could be a private
message asking how they are doing. But, I
would never accept a friend request and then
never, ever comment on a Facebook status or
picture.
It also definitely meets the qualifications of a
Facebook snob if someone sends you a pri-

Alexandre
vate message and you completely ignore the
message altogether.
Facebook Snob Characteristic #3:Invites other Facebook friends to events, but ignores
mutual, real-life friends.
If you're going to host a party, it's understandable if you can't invite everyone. However, it's
best not to do it through Facebook. It's simply
rude to let everyone else that you've invited
some people to your party, but don't want
other people to attend. Everyone else might
be able to see about the event, read comments on their walls, etc. Try to be courtesy
and invite people the old-fashioned way.
Facebook Snob Characteristic #4:Hides people frequently for no good reason.
Would you "hide" someone in real life? Hiding
friends might be considered a little snobby. It
really depends on the circumstances. Read "Is
it Rude to Hide Someone on Facebook?â&#x20AC;? For
more insight on this issue. It's understandable
to hide people to you don't really know well,
or at all, but if you're hiding your brother, that
might mean you are a Facebook snob.

...and You are?

26

Siener in die Suburbs – Reviewed
By James Holmes
Fear and future, ambition and angst, Siener in die Suburbs had it all. Part of the second term’s cultural boom, Siener’s edited script put forth a surprisingly complex plot and a cast of eerily lifelike characters, all in a fantastically South African context. Ms Potgieter modernised the old Apartheid-era story and put it in a current context, while highlighting how many
social issues are exactly the same. “The cast was really diverse, but still easy to relate to. We had fun, but it was also about
making a statement about stereotypes,” said Courtney Koopman, who played Ma, in whose backyard the action of Siener
takes place. The show seemed to have it all: ranging from the comedic portrait of Giel, the gambler, to the deep struggles
facing Tiemmie and today’s youth. Despite most of the show being spoken in Afrikaans, Siener drew crowds of all languages, and the superb acting made it enjoyable regardless, not to mention the thoughtful English synopsis. Siener was a
brilliantly polished performance, executed with a sharp professionalism beneath the emotive story. Many of the actors do
not take Drama as a subject, not to mention Matthew Bloem, Siphe Joyi and Brian Ferguson who are not Huistaal students.
The script featured long monologues and extended scenes, but the cast pulled it off perfectly. Combined with the stunning
set and innovative use of props, the Afrikaans department has set the bar astronomically high for future productions.

Cinderella Dance Production
MARY GOUWS
Every little girl’s dream: to be a princess. On the
sixth to the eighth of June this dream became a reality, as girls from the ages of 3 to 18 were joined
by the boys of Saint Andrew’s College in a beautiful
production of “Cinderella”.
For almost two hours the audience was captivated
by the classic story of Cinderella, Jemma Houghton,
falling for the handsome prince, Stuart Stopforth.
One cannot go without mentioning the stepsisters,
Emma Dreyer and Akhona Mnqandi, and Refuoe
Mokhobo as the Stepmother whose squabbling was
humorous yet wonderfully elegant. From the tiny
mice to the most experienced dancers, Jemma
Houghton as Cinderella and Michaela Oxley as the
Fairy Godmother, everything came together for a
spectacular show.
We, who simply sat and watched, don’t realise how
many hours of intense preparation it took for the
dancers and the backstage helpers to perfect
“Cinderella”. From the beginning of the year, the
dancers have been going through auditions and
learning and practising every step over and over
again.

Jemma Houghton as Cinderella.

Trying to control a bunch of excited 3 year-olds is
no easy task for the many DSG girls and College
boys who volunteered to contribute to the production. And although these tasks, as well as the Audio
Visual crew (of DSG girls and St. Andrews College
boys) probably went unnoticed to most, they were
absolutely vital to the success of the production.
The visual effects, including lights, background images and stunning costumes ,were exceptional,
adding to the dream-like experience.
What we don’t always think about is that the dances don’t just choreograph themselves, so a huge
applause must be given to Miss Potgieter, whose
hard work and dedication to dance at the two
schools, has resulted in us being able to derive such
enjoyment from the production.
A total of 57 girls and boys danced in a total of five
shows, with many more teachers, parents and other children helping out too.
All in all, it was definitely one of the best productions the DSG and St Andrew’s College have put on!

Avicii – wake me up: It has a great beat. It can be a great song for jogging a party with friends or
just easy listening whatever you prefer. I think it’s a great pop song. If you like it too check it out on
YouTube and check out the rest of the music by Avicii next week you may find your mp3 player, IPod
or phone cluttered with his songs.
I give this song a 8/10

Daft punk- Get lucky: Has a great dance beat and it would be a great dance party song. Other people like their earlier work. But I like this song. I don’t think it’s bad. Others say that it would be great
if they made a dub step remix. I think it’s a great song for easy listening and I think I’ll keep this
song for a while.
I give this song a 7/10

Katy Perry – Roar: As with all great Katy Perry songs it’s based on life experience. If you watch her
movie part of me you will understand that her life became full of fun and friends when she left her
home town and went to L.A. It has a great message for people at college and D.S.G. It’s a great party song and a song to be uplifted by. It’s also a song I’ll keep on my jogging playlist just for that extra
push.
(Don’t judge me I’m a Katy Perry fan)
I give this song a 8 1/2/10

Miley Cyrus – Wrecking ball: Ok so even I know this music video is controversial. I mean the music
video is inappropriate. The song however isn’t bad but the video just ruins it according to my fellow
news writers. It has absolutely no message. I mean it’s basically a Taylor swift song about the fact
that her fiancé dropped her. But the song can be a good party song if you like this kind of music.
But personally I don’t like it that much but here’s my review.
I give this song a 5 1/2 /10

Little Mix – Wings: So this is a new song and this group won X factor UK. So their good if they can do
this. But their versatile if you think this song is a bit “Disney” check out their song DNA. They’re a
little like The Saturdays. They have a great beat it’s a great party song but its still just a party song.
I give this song a 6 ½ /10

29

Best games of 2013
By Abongile Donwana

Fifa 14: rating 9.2/10
Fifa 14 has had lots of praise with analysts saying itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the
best Fifa yet. With so much new features to offer such as
pure shot, precision movement, real ball physics, protect the
ball, team mate intelligence, ultimate team, global transfer
market and co-op seasons. It has a lot new to offer. And It
has definitely lived up to itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s expectations.it also has great
online multiplayer modes such as Ultimate Team which is a
favourite for me.

Grand Theft Auto 5: Rating 9.5/10
GTA 5 in no doubt is the best game of 2013 beating Fifa.
It is a completely different GTA with a whole lot more to
offer. For the first time it lets you play with 3 different
character who all have one goal but have totally different
personalities and backgrounds. It also gives you more freedom when not doing missions such as hunting etc, GTA 5
also got the second best ratings of all time on PS3

Halo 4: Rating 8.5/10
Halo 4 has an amazing storyline with an epic sci-fi feeling.
It also has superb graphics and an awesome multiplayer
mode. It also has great weapons and compelling and unpredictable action the only con is the fact that it plays thing
relatively safe.

Assasins Creed 4: rating 9/10
Assasins Creed 4 is said to be a very adventurous and
action packed game with the game taking place in a totally different area (sea) and the character being a Pirate.
You are able to sail the sea find islands and has great
multiplayer features such as domination, man hunt and
wanted. We hope it can be a chart topping game when it
comes out but who know?
30

The Broken-Hearted Asked and Answered.
The Heart Broken Asked...

Q:

How should I destroy my ex-Boyfriends stuff? [FluffyKitty4426]

A: Well if it’s not valuable beat it with a baseball bat or burn it. However if it is sell it on the internet. However if you
want to push his buttons take pictures while you destroy his stuff and upload it to Facebook and Twitter. [Sutton Summers]

Q: How do I tell my best friend to stop dating my EX-boyfriend?[AngryBird2]
A: Well the golden rule between friends is that you don’t date you friends EX. But if she doesn’t know that or is a Tart just
come right out and tell her. Don’t be a door mat! [Sutton Summers]

Q: How do I get back into the dating game after I got over my EX? [Yen1855]
A: First stop moping around, then go to clubs, go outside try to meet new people. There are however a few rules.
1: Don’t seem distant. 2: Strike up a conversation with somebody you don't know. 3: Don’t talk about your last relationship. EVER! [Sutton Summers]

Q: I'm currently in a relationship but I feel insecure how should I do?[
A: Well get over yourself! Then just sit him down and talk to them about it. Ask him what his favourite thing is about you
after you. Tell him what your insecure about. But last and most importantly say you love each other. [Sutton Summers]

31

Written, compiled and produced by the SAC/DSG School Newspaper Team
2013