1. Learn the lessons of Blink: "One of the things they have to understand is the girl is thin-slicing them — what they're wearing, the kind of energy they're bringing, the whole presence."
2. Analyze Gladwell's anecdotes through the prism of pulling chicks: The Don sprinkles anecdotes from Gladwell throughout his teachings. Such as Gladwell's favorite chestnut about how Mary Tyler Moore and All in the Family did really poorly with focus groups. Lesson: don't ask girls about how to pick up girls.

3. Gladwell's books exist primarily to make vacuous people sound intelligent: "The best places to find conversation is to read a lot of books, and some of the books we recommend are Blink and The Tipping Point." Even celibate fools can understand and regurgitate them, to great effect, allegedly.

4. The mere whiff of a Gladwell book cover is an aphrodisiac: The Don has not read Outliers yet, but, he said, "it's sitting on my desk."

5. Imitate the ways of the Master: The Don on Gladwell: "It comes through in the books that guy would do great with women."

Malcolm Gladwell has 99 problems and corresponding theoretical proposed solutions, but women are not a category for which such a thing is necessary, if you know what we're saying.