1. A guy who'd been caught embezzling thousands went along to a lawyer. His attorney told him, 'Dont worry. Youll never go to jail with all that money? Actually, when the man was delivered to jail, h-e didnt have a dollar.

2. As the attorney awoke from surgery, he asked, 'Why are all the shades drawn'? The nurse answered, 'There is a fire next door, and we didn't want you to believe you had died.'

3. God chose to take the devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. Satan noticed this, laughed and said, 'And where do you think you're likely to locate a attorney'?

4. A lawyer is sitting at the table in his new office. H-e hears someone visiting the doorway. To get other viewpoints, please consider taking a look at: source. To impress his first potential client, h-e sees the telephone because the door opens and claims, 'I need one-million and not a penny less.' As h-e hangs up, the man now standing in his office says, 'I am here to lift up your phone.'

And finally:

You May Be Considered A Lawyer If.... You are getting someone to read these cracks..