Most Helpful Guy

Okay, I'm going to tell you something that you're not going to want to hear but it's the truth and by telling you I'm saving you a lot of crap.

If you can't get women to pay attention to you, it is your fault. Period.

Now what to do is the question here, right? I would say improve yourself, gain some confidence, talk to some girls online, see what they say, and eventually you'll get this figured out.

But do not, I repeat, DO NOT EVER blame the women. Don't do what the MRA douche bags do. Don't try to be a pick up artist or anything like that. The "Manosphere" is your worst enemy. Do not ever, EVER take any advice from any of them at all. Ever.

This is a problem with you, not them. Now you have to figure out what it is and work on fixing it. When you do that you'll be able to approach women and sometimes it will work out. Most of the time they don't want to be approached though, so figure out where and when it's appropriate to do that and respect them like human beings because they are. Men and women are a LOT more similar than you think.

One more thing. If you know of any girls who like you, give them a shot unless you're just totally against it. Who knows, maybe you'll figure out they're cooler than you think. Attractive women are just people like you or me. All women are, in fact. Not a big mystery here. Just listen, learn, and be a decent human being and you'll be good.

I can say this much here and now, his negative attitude is sure turn off. I want a man who I can count on to believe that he can get through a tough situation, rather than sitting there feeling sorry for himself and/or expecting someone else to hand him the answers. If you believe you will fail, you will.

Yeah, I see what you're saying there. I liken it to a restaurant. Do you want to eat at the joint down the street with two customers and one car in the lot or do you want to go to the one that's crowded and got a line around the block? Why do you want to eat at a place that has nothing going on for itself? Maybe the food metaphor wasn't the best choice all things considered but I think it kinda works. You want someone who can handle business, right? Not that hard to understand. If they're just waiting for something to happen and don't try to improve things you're going to go to the other bistro down the street.

I just REALLY hope he's not fallen for the MRA crap. I'm a little worried about that, honestly.

No, it works. Look man, we're trying to help you. If you don't want to change something then why are you here wasting our time? Do you want to keep striking out again and again and again or not? Why am I not asking these questions? Why is it only you? Why don't I get rejected every time?

If you want to insult me and everyone else who's trying to help you out then I don't know why you're bothering. Do you just want to vent your frustration or do you actually want to improve your life? I've gotten two up votes from girls already. I doubt more than two or three bothered to read this far down with your constant "Woe is me!" stuff.

I don't have the same problem as you and trust me, I'm no Brad Pitt. In fact, I am quite disabled. Visibly so. Most people would think I would be in your position no matter what. But I'm not. So if you're not here to learn something then I don't know why you're wasting time. That attitude is why no one wants to give you a shot. Right there.

It's not that way for me or other people. Either you're trolling or you don't know what you want. I suggest reading every post by every female here and then re-read them until you figure out what they have in common. It's there in mine too, by the way. You want to stop getting rejected again and again and again, I suggest you take your fingers out of your ears. If you want to keep getting your 100% rejection rate then keep on keeping on.

I wouldn't want to date you if I were a woman either. If you changed some things about you that might be different. You need to decide what you really want.

Great answer! To the asker, girls like confident guys. I, personally, can't stand a pessimist (male or female). Take life by the balls. Everyone likes something different. For every 10 that you are attracted to, you might find one that reciprocates. Unfortunately, many many people want the perfect 10. You can be a 4 and you still want a perfect 10 in the looks department. Guess what, the majority of the time, it doesn't work. I have heard many guys complain that the perfect 10 was probably a 3 when it came to intelligence and personality. Getting to know a person actually works. I have been able to rule out quite a few guys that way. If it's a stranger, then it's harder. Personally, I don't give my number to a guy just because he asks. There are way too many psychos in this world. There are so many instances that I could give you about why a girl rejects, but it's just too much. You need to have confidence (minus the arrogance); have a sense of humor; have an actual brain;

don't expect just sex; please smile and look happy; have realistic life goals; and so on. Same goes for women. I used to go after looks when I was younger, but have learned that really doesn't go far. Now, I am more observant when dealing with any guy. I pay attention to his actions and his words. I would run away from a smooth guy before the awkward guy due to sincerity.

What Girls Said 32

Whats the point of approaching girls if it's a 99.9999% rejection rate? If u are going to get rejected every time is it even worth a shot at all? In my opinion it depends on what the person is aiming for. As you're likely a heterosexual male it's probably sex in which case I'm not seeing a suitable point as this can be gotten via prostitutes.

Though in my opinion if a person is getting rejected every time it's suited to honestly evaluate what they want and what they have to offer as well as how they are approaching gals.

Why not save your dignity?I'm not seeing much dignity to be saved as it's not as if you were disrespected or violated in my opinion. It's amusing to me the extent in which guys often seemingly exaggerate rejection while diminishing acts like sexual/street harassment, street hollering, sexual assault and such when done to gals.

I think both girls and guys make a bigger deal out of rejection than needs be. I mean why on earth do girls feel sorry or bad for rejecting someone and why do people make things awkward in the aftermath.

I accept their decision, move on and have no ill feeling towards them.

I'll go ahead and clarify, so that it's here if you want my suggestions. You're more likely to get a date from someone if you know you have common interests. That is the best place to start looking for compatibility. Go to a place where people who enjoy your own hobbies would already be hanging out. Try approaching a girl there. OR, do your homework, and find out if the girl you are interested in has any common interests. I personally don't know any girls that would be very happy dating a man who had nothing in common with her.

If you keep failing that much, you need to reevaluate yourself and how you're approaching these gals. Do you look good? Do you look presentable? Are your clothes fresh and clean? Do you smile at them? What do you talk about? How is your timing? Is there room for improvement?Most likely the problem is your approach. But hey, if you don't want to do it, then nobody's gonna stop you really. Do whatever you wanna do man.

Nope. I've gotten approached twice in my life. When I was 15 by a guy who was crushing on me, and when I was 18 at a bar by a guy who was drunk as fuck. And I don't count cat calling as "approaching" either.

You don't know shit about me, so don't act like I'd reject anyone just because I look a certain way. :)No wonder you have a 99.9999% rejection rate. With that attitude, you'll have to search long and hard for a girl who would put up with it. It reeks of bitterness.

Ｗｈａｔ＇ｓ ｔｈｅ ｐｏｉｎｔ ｏｆ ｎｏｔ ａｐｐｒｏａｃｈｉｎｇ ｔｈｅｍ ｔｈｅn? The only reason you feel embarrassed is if you feel like you are being pathetic and needy. Approaching someone new takes balls, be proud that you made a move instead of the other 99% of the guys that wanted to in the room.

Well, there goes your answer.If you don't try how do you even know what the rejection rate may be?That's just a percentage you simply made up on the top of your head because you don't feel confident even to do the approaching.

I have to be honest with you,YES, you will get rejected by some.Others, will want to give you the time of day.

Rejection is a part of life.If you can't deal with rejection, you can't deal with life itself.

@Consider: There are many reasons why a girl will say no.1. She isn't interested. 2. She is in a relationship 3. She is just getting out of a relationship and doesn't want to immediately enter into another one. 4. She is moving 5. She doesn't have time for a boyfriend (too busy) school, work, other duties. etc.

If you continue with that kind of attitude then you're right, you will always end up being rejected. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Not only that, but girls will be less likely to be attracted to a self-deprecating, self-defeating guy.You have to realize that sometimes you try and fail, sometimes you try and win. Things don't always go your way but that doesn't mean that they never will!

Because if you never try you'll definitively never get a girl. And if you try at least you have a chance to get her and you won't spend your time wondering "what if?" Anyway, girls won't reject you forever! Must be just a bad phase don't get too upset about it :)

you should learn something about approaching girls. Like... if almost every girl that you approach doesn't wanna be approached, maybe girls... don't wanna be approached? Maybe this is a bad way, in general, to treat women?

Women aren't even eligible to talk about 'rejection', because they can just sit around all day without batting an eyelid, and men approach them. They can then choose the best amongst those who approach. In other words, women are served a relationship/date on a platter (although it does require effort from them to keep things going). Most women don't even know or understand how rejection feels, with respect to dating.In spite of so many changes in gender roles, women still have this 18th century mindset that men should ALWAYS make the first move. This is hypocrisy of the highest order.

aficionado I take it you've never been a fat chick at a prep school before. I heard some of the guys literally tell girls that they are "perfect girlfriend material, but too fat to date", and that was the only reason they were rejected.

Even fat chicks gets date.. and Rejection stings like a lot.. especially when you are approaching someone, because usuallly it takes a lot of guts to decide and approach a lady and then when you get rejected, ohh it sucks so freaking much...

I didn't say I think it's right men have to do all the approaching. But seriously why should I approach men when they're already approaching me? Should I look like an idiot and approach them after they approach me and say the exact same shit? Nope. Doesn't make sense. Seriously

Uh haha I'm a girl with many guy friends, and I honestly think its awful that society believes that guys should always do the approaching. Whoever has interest should approach the other. There are no set rules. But at the same time I think its so stupid when guys think that women are obligated to "give them a chance" JUST because they approached us. We don't owe you anything. We're sorry you're not our type or whatever, and most decent girls will try and make the rejection easy on you, but we don't owe you anything.And yes, I have approached a few guys and been rejected. It hurts.

if you have already approached the girl and she has been rejection you, there is no point of doing it again and again. As for me I get really annoyed if a boy keeps pestering me to go out with him. it will get to a point she will get feed up and ignore you, even the chance of being her friend will be gone. Ask a girl once and if she says no don`t bother and move on

You can certainly try it. No harm in it. But knowing you try a more a subtle approach. Start with a casual and sure talk. Do your homework first. If she doesn't get it then be more direct. Your call :)

i recently just asked a guy out haha. he didn't reject me, thank god, but i know that if you really like someone and you're even thinking about asking them out even though you've been rejected before, that they're probably worth asking! go for it, you're going to wish you did.

that's really sweet of you to say, but everyone gets rejected at least one time in their lives. I know i'm going to face that one day but at least it'll make you realize what you're NOT looking for in a girl haha.

personally i hate when guys approach me and hit on me. I think its cheesy. I would say start a basic conversation. If your referring to your example above going to college with her find a common interest maybe your in the same class start up a conversation about that, or maybe ask her out to coffee. I suggest no cheesy pick up lines.

Not all girls are the same. And there's still a 0.0001% of chance to find a girl who won't reject you, by the mistakes you have made before you learn different ways to approach girls, and make them interested

That's how it is with most things you want. You want a job, you submit a hundred applications, you maybe get three calls back for interviews. Some people may get twenty calls back and that comes down to how great their resume is, their cover letter, timing and other competition, etc. Same thing with dating. It's draining and hard for a lot of people but if you work on improving your game and you keep at it a girl will eventually bite. If you don't try at all, you're shooting yourself in the foot by guaranteeing yourself a 100% rejection rate.

What Guys Said 49

If your rejection rate is 99.99999%, your approach skills suck. No mater how ugly a loser you are, you should be able to crawl up to lets say a 99.9% rejection rate at worst. Maybe even only an 85% rejection rate!!! Think how good that would be.

Given your approach sucks, you need to work on the SKILL. And that involves practice. Mindful practice. (That means, practice paying attention to what you're doing, what is working, what isn't working, and adapting). So even if you are getting rejected 100% of the time, you might be improving skills, comfort, relaxation and ability to read women in an approach, all of which could pay off in the future.

Even an incredibly attractive man would be unlikely to ever have an 85% rejection rate from approaching women. Think about it, around two-thirds of women are in relationships of some kind, add to this lesbians and other groups who have no interest in dating, it will rise to about 70%. So if you have an 85% rejection rate (15% success rate) you are basically claiming half of the available women want to sleep with you. I've never met a guy that is true for (discounting celebrities). An ugly loser certainly isn't going to be attractive to half the female population.

And yes, i can imagine falling every time no matter what. I've watched my kids learn to walk. They failed and failed and failed and failed. We all act like its hard to learn things when we're old. It's such a pile of crap. Learning things was never easy.

Bro, it happens to all of us. I've done pretty well for myself, and I have probably a 1% success rate at best, haha. Think of all the girls you'll throw game at in your lifetime, and divide by the amount of girls the average dude sleeps with in his life, which if I were to guess, would be in the 2-10 range. Out of thousands of women you'll holler at. Not a good ratio, haha. You just gotta let it roll off. Don't let it psych you out. To borrow from 40 Year Old Virgin, the idea is to plant hundreds of seeds in hopes that one will grow into a plant, and then you fuck the plant, haha. Getting discouraged is the worst thing you can do. Throw everything out the window: looks, personality, social status, all of the things guys get caught up in thinking girls want. Some girls do want those things, but one thing I can guarantee you, having a losing attitude will sink your ship with pretty much any chick 100 times out of 100.

I hear ya, I'm sure you're frustrated. There might be things you can do to clean up your game on a physical or personality level, its tough to say without knowing you. But as far as the approach goes, you just have play it cool and not let rejection beat you up. Another movie clip comes to mind --and as with all Hollywood shit, take this with a grain of salt-- that kind of illustrates what I mean.http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4WzyxybYEGMDon't be a dick to girls like this might imply, but as far as inside your own mind, I think there's a lot of truth in this, at least until you get the girl. Always be cool, always be a gentleman, but never give the impression that she's the only shot you have. Desperation is the anti-poon, haha.

Just talk casually with girls who happen to cross your path in life and you'll be able to have conversations with them that aren't so boldly obvious that you're "approaching." That's how you save your dignity. You can leave her wondering if you're the single one in this case.

First your statistics are bogus. If it were a 99.9999 rejection rate that would mean 1 accept for every 1,000,000 asks. I'm pretty sure you haven't asked a million girls out.

To increase your odds:

1 - Improve yourself. - Dress, manner, skills and abilities2 - Ask out the right girls - If I ask out the hottest 5% of girls do you think the rejection rate will be higher or lower than the 5% least attractive girls? Simple math - 50% of the population cannot date the top 10% of the female population.3 - Become friends with girls first before moving to the next level.

If I were a girl I'd be a bit leery of any guy asking me out without context. I'd be much more inclined to say yes to someone I already knew on a personal level.

Its like saying 'what is the point of fishing if you don't catch fish 99.9999% of the time? - when you are a fisherman with no bait and casting a line into a corn field in Iowa.

Come on, man. Serious?Don't whine, make more efforts, discuss with your mates if they do daygame as well.Women do put lots of shit tests on men. Check out their vibse, if they say things like ''I have a bf'' with a dead serious face, you gonna fuckin brush up ur emotions and skills bro

You should be checking the body language, before you do any approaching.It will save you a lot of wasted time and effort.If your body language is good, and you notice some inviting signs of interest from her, send some good body language signals in return.Then do the approaching.

Think of it like a lottery. You can't win the lottery if you don't play the lottery. Same with women. You might get turned down, but you definitely will get turned down if you don't ask in the first place.

OP I'm below average looks wise and even I don't get rejected 99% of the time. Just don't be awkward lol. Try to be funny. Once I just straight up asked this girl if she wanted to dance and she rejected me but a few minutes before the bar was gonna close guess what she did? She saw my talking to my group which included some girls and she took my hand and dragged me to the dance floor. You just have to keep on trying. Don't let the rejections get to you. I know you don't want to hear this but if it keeps happening at a 99% clip then you are doing something wrong.

Joe is bit to harsh... I don't agree with him. It seems as though he's putting all the blame on you which I don't agree with. Sometimes the girl has had bad experiences in the past, maybe she's nervous. To simply put the blame on you isn't right. He then goes on to tell you to give women who try to get with you, a shot. What entitles all women to be able to have a shot with you? I've rejected women and I've been rejected myself. Its a two way street, no one it entitled to be with you. But that's just me.

If you walk in thinking nothing will happen, you may be more casual and confident than if you're worried about the outcome. No matter what, flirting with women, even if you believe nothing will come of it, is great practice. Getting used to talking to women makes it easier every time.

Poor you, I used to whine, but now I hate somebody who fuckin' whine without taking much actions. If you really think 99.9999% is rejection, then save your 00,0001% for something else.Ask yourself. What's your point of approaching girls? Ultimately wanting sex? That guarantees rejections! If you want some genuine connections and sparks with those girls, you have to start working on your 0,0001% to achieve something.

Everyone gets rejected, no one alive has never been rejected, unless they've never tried. Maybe it's a fear of rejection, or the notion that you'll probably be rejected that's holding you back and keeping you from even trying. But if you don't try it's a 100% rejection rate.

You should just talk to women more often and not worry about the outcome. Where a lot of guys fall is because they're so focused on what to say to NOT get rejected, they often don't make a move at all.

You gotta change your approach. You're obviously doing something that doesn't carry over well with the ladies. Idea. Find a good friend that's a girl and practice what to say/how to approach. She'll tell you what works and what doesn't. Good luck.

The point would be the next woman could be interested, since each woman makes independent decisions from the previous ones you approached, albeit based on similar factors. Your dignity is an illusion that only exists in your mind, you decide whether you have dignity or not, rejection does not result in the loss of anything (assuming its from a stranger rather than a member of your extended social circle).

How can you know without approaching, unless you are suggesting a program of psychic power. But even that wouldn't work, because most girls who are strangers, are not interested until they interact with you.

I can tell you that if you don't try that your chances are basically zero. I've had girls interested in me but none of them ever have made the first move they may flirt and send signals but they expect the guy to talk and ask them out/for their name/number.