“Hello 911? Yeah, I Need a Woman.” And Then It Gets Worse

This is not the woman they handcuffed. (Photo: Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images)

By Carlos Delgado

At JACK FM, we know plenty about not being to get a date, but we never thought our dry spell was an emergency. Then again, there’s a lot of things we don’t think about. That’s what happens when you “play what you want.” But we digress.

Kareem Collins from Slidell (near New Orleans), Louisiana, on the other hand, could no longer be alone and decided to do something about it.

Unfortunately, his approach to finding a woman was a tad untraditional, and not in a good way, WDSU.com reports. Rather than, you know, ask a girl out on a date, he instead called 911. When asked what his emergency was, he told dispatchers that he needed a woman.

Now, calling 911 because you’re lonely is bad enough and yes, will get you in trouble, but the story doesn’t end there. Police ran Collins’ criminal history and discovered he is a convicted sex offender. Worse yet, when he moved from New Orleans to Slidell, Collins didn’t notify authorities as required by law, meaning he is now a non-compliant sex offender. As you can imagine, Police were promptly sent over and arrested Collins.

So to recap, Collins, a sex offender, is still without a woman, called 911 even though he didn’t have an emergency, and is now being charged with failure to register for a change of address. In short, don’t be this guy.