This begins our countdown until next week when both Moon & I enter a new stage in our jobs where we can find time for each other longer than a quick “Hi FML” for 5 minutes each day. 5 days to go…

Dear LTT,

I know, I know we’ve done the Alpaca Llama thing to death. I mean, Taylor looks like a llama! There are llama farms in Forks! Haha. So funny. But as luck would have it, an anonymous LTTer (not me, but anonymous for her or his(!) dignity’s sake) had a dream in which Chris Weitz was a Pomeranian. It was one of those Princess and the Frog type of story lines in which she or he(!) kisses the pooch and it becomes the DILF (x2 almost, btw!). The catch being that after ten seconds of the most recent human kiss, he turns back into the Pomeranian. Very awkward indeed.

When she or he told me about this dream, I knew there was only one rational response. Since I’m a good friend and really love procrastinating, I felt the only thing I could do was create, say, a minimum of five mash-ups of Chrispom (which, adorably, looks a lot like Chrisporn):

After that happened and I increased the day’s happiness levels for everyone who received the Chrispom, an email thread regarding “We should do the other directors! David Slade clearly is a naked mole rat” ensued. These were the results:

As you can see, Taylor is not the only one who can be compared to a domestic and/or wild animal to bring about happiness in one’s day.

Chrispom Forever!!!

With Kind Regards,

Team Seth

In other news, Team Seth’s letter today informed me that Alpacas=Lamas. I did not know this. I might be dumb.

I’m gonna tell you and all my LTT and BreakingDawnMovie.org friends about that time I went to the Abduction premiere and saw you and your new movie. But first can I just say every time I hear the title “Abduction” is makes me think of the abductor equipment at the gym which looks like a medieval torture devices for your downstairs area and that makes me wonder if you think about that since you’re so well acquainted with the gym and then I start thinking about downstairs areas and then… well, never mind let’s just get on with the story…

The lovely Lionsgate let me go to the Abduction premiere to represent for some of your favorite fans sites namely BreakingDawnMovie.org and duh, LTT. So, this a spring in my step and an iphone in hand I ran off to Hollywood and Highland with the hopes of seeing TayTay and his new movie… and not so secretly Big Daddy aka Daniel Lautner our personal LTT hero and favorite.

(as always click all pics to enlarge)

So there were a couple snafu’s with the will call line and like every fan site they invited there kinda got forgotten about BUT the Lionsgate team tried to wrangle us a decent spot to bring you action. Please forgive some heads and whatnot in the shots as we were behind some folks…

Namely Candle Crown Birthday Girl. So I’m sure it really made this girls birthday to be at the Abduction premiere and see Taylor and whatever but even though I’m pretty tall, was wearing heels, on a step and practically hanging off a stop sign/scaffolding her DUMB candle crown hat got in pretty much EVERY PHOTO. So thanks, Candle crown hat birthday girl for having a birthday and forcing us all to celebrate with you. Forever. Via these images.

We settled in to wait for Taylor because I mean who else in the movie were we really there to support? This isn’t Letters to Alfred Molina or Breaking Dawn and Lilly Collins Movie.org BUT we were pleasantly surprised… cause who would just happen to step onto the black carpet but Seth Clearwater himself, aka BooBoo Stewart and of course the sister Fievel. Like the mouse who goes west. Cute lil BooBoo even came over to sign some stuff for the fans…

I won’t even tell you what things I had to yell to get him to do what happened next… those are things for Chris Hanson to question me about later…

So clearly I haven’t gotten the hang of this whole video thing because I don’t even have the blasted thing rolling to catch what he said at the beginning. But I’m pretty sure he all loves us and sends all of Robs love to us and promises we can all marry Rob and have his babies… or maybe he just says hi, but whatever same diff.

Then a ton of Disney Channel stars walked by whom I guess are like a thing judging by the way the kids around me reacted. So if that sorta deal is your thing than I’m told it’s some kids from Awkward and Smash Hits? I’m sure I just showed how old I am by totally calling them the wrong titles. OH WELLS moving on…

Oh heeeeey Sigourney Weaver whom I only got this shot of because Crown Candle Hat Birthday Girl was too busy freaking out over a Disney star…

So who do I see coming down the carpet but Mr. Chris Weitz himself! Of course I like yell out CHRIS! CHRIS! And everyone around me had NO idea. Thank God Alison from Twifans.com was by me and totally got it! She yelled that they loved A Better Life and that made him very happy, and because I am that person I yelled that I was from East LA and that reeled him in you guys! Echo Park FTW! So I asked him to say hi to you guys here at LTT and thiiiiis happened…

(crank up the volume)

Since of course I am specially able-d with the camera I missed like the beginning but he says something to you all and then… “thank you, thank you very much for being kind to me, and not making fun of me too much… bye bye” The wave, lolzforever yall. Also, please ignore my valley girl sounding voice. Yikes!

HAHAHAHA YOU GUISE, it’s like he knows us or something. Us, make fun of someone?! NEVER! Ok, always. Like, every day.

You can stop the Dreamweaver music now because the best part of this whole thing is over and because your coworkers probably think you’re even weirder today. Ok, I kid but what happened next was probably one of the weirder/awesome moments I’ve had at a Twi-related event because who should walk like 2 feet behind us and avoid the carpet all together but Justin Bieber. The HALE? We just thought the screams were for Taylor arriving or something but no, Taylor was not there it was the Biebs and all the Bieblievers lost.their.shit. yall! It was pretty awesome. Witness the blurry side of his head:
Then who would just happen to slink in a few feet behind him??? Yup, Selena Gomez. No need to hide if from us kids, we ALL know. Though it did make me long for these days… I was also secretly hoping that Taylor Swift would make an appearance and Swiftner would be reunited but it wasn’t meant to be folks…. maybe some day…

FINALLY Taylor Lautner shows up… and the girls rejoiced…
Let me just tell you this boy was there to WERK and work he did… all up and down the fans (except right in front of us HRMPH), the press, the fans ACROSS the street and back around for the press again all while people chanted his name. It was pretty cute to see him at his OWN movie premiere without any of the Twilight stuff involved… I mean like besides us… and everyone else, but you know what I’m saying…

Why yes, I still eat meat patties and sweet potatoes every day. In fact I have a baggie full with me now, in my suit pocket.

During this time three things happened…
Wilmer Valderramer showed up. I KNOW. Maybe he’s a huge Taylor fan, or loves free popcorn and movies, or maybe he just needed to talk to the girl from Reelz Channel but for whatever reason whilst Taylor was doing his thing with the cameras Wilmer decided to walk the carpet.

Then who would walk behind us but BILL CONDON! I mean all we were missing were David Slade and Cathi Hardi and the whole family would have been there.

The other thing that happened during this time was that I spotted Big Daddy aka Daniel Lautner on the way far other end of the carpet. You can cue up that Dreamweaver song again now… he was like a vision… in a white shirt from Men’s Big N Tall, black pants, hair buzzed and looking ready to eat some free popcorn and see the movie he produced. But sadly, this is where the tale ends because Big Daddy walked right to the theater and out of our lives. Ok, stop the music again. SADNESS my friends. SADNESS.

Good thing this guy was still around for us to look at… and let me just say ladies (and gheys) he’s all growns up and looking goooood. Blue suit, tailored just right, the hairs appeared to be kinda combed to the side. All I’m saying is I’m glad I don’t need to be running to Georgia after every Taylor post I do anymore. Whatta guy.

So things were winding down and we decided to head inside so we could get our seats and see what all the fuss was about. After director John Singleton introduced the movie and waxed poetic about Taylor (and Big Daddy) they started the film.

I don’t want to give away any spoilers but it is a very fun movie that we had a REALLY great time watching. Sure there were some lines here and there that had us laughing for other reasons but at this point I feel like they’re just putting those in there for us. If you don’t have plans this weekend or want to pull a double feature with Drive, you could definitely take your boyfriend, or your hubs or your gay and go see Abduction because there is a ton of action and butt kicking and bombs (in ovens). But really just take your girlfriends because who wants to have to explain why Taylor doesn’t have his shirt on or why their make out scene is hotter than anything we’ve seen in Twilight. I kid you not. ENJOY!

I leave you with this…

I was abducted?!

The End!
Themoonisdown

Special Thanks To: Lionsgate, Will and BreakingDawnMovie.org for letting us rep them and “abduct” their Twitter feed for the night and the cast and black carpet attendees for stopping by to say hello!

Ok, so talk amongst yourselves… Abduction, you going to see it? Do we love growns up Taylor? Do we love Chris Weitz even more?

NO ONE CARES. Seriously, no one care what camera angles he used or what movie best displays the use of the wide angle lens, or how foreign film distributors choose what day to release a film vs the US distributors and we especially don’t care for Chris’s take on Rob’s body parts (though they are lovely). You are ALL 2nd hand embarrassing to read and make the rest of us look like losers with hormonal issues who get off on tweeting semi naughty things to a guy who worked with a guy you like. It’s like asking your barista at Starbucks if your crush has ever creamed their coffee… hur hur hur… see what I did there? Yea, it was gross and that’s how some of you make us all look!

Srsly! How cute is this kid??

Don’t get me wrong, it’s BEYOND awesome that Chris tweets regularly and responds to his followers at all! It’s super cool and we love it and whatever but all I’m saying it stop with the facade of really caring about camera lenses, we know you just want to ask about Robsten. So check yo’self before you wreck yo’self. Annndddd if you feel the need to tweet him here’s a list of approved topics I’ve come up with:

Things we care about Chris Weitz tweeting about:

Taylor Lautner bits

Jokes about his mustard pants

Cute stuff about his freaking adorable son

Things tweeted in spanish (caliente!)

Restaurant recommendations

Twitpics of him at the pool

What he’s listening to

Stuff about his movies he’s working on

Twitpics of the mustard pants

Twitpics of his freaking adorable son with the mustard pants near Chris in a pool

Secret meet up locations

Whether Big Daddy was a diva on the New Moon set like he ALLEGEDLY is now

The juxtaposition between his jewish last name and christian first name (srsly, I wonder these things)

Why he’s so awesome

Whether him, Cathi Hardi, David Slade and Bill Condon meet up regularly at Cathi’s favorite Friday’s for drinks and reminisce about the old days, share war stories and who has the best black mail tape of Robsten.

Every day he's tweetin'!

Tonight (last night as it were) I will be at the LA Film Fest seeing Mamitas while Chris is in a nearby theater presenting the World Premiere (oh la la!) of A Better Life… I will be enjoying Mamitas but I will be secretly longing to see your new film FIRST… and hoping that my pal who IS seeing A Better Life will get us all the TLaut and KStew gossip as they will ALLEGEDY, MAYBE be there to represent and support you. HOW great is that?! All these people love Chris! Anyway, I’m hoping Taylor brings Big Daddy and I can see the Diva from afar.

Instead of tweeting why don’t we all go see A Better Life?

Themoonisdown

Is it crazy we’re still burning a candle for this guy? NO!!! Also who wants to see A Better Life? Anyone been hitting up the awesome LA Film Fest over the past week?? No Eclipse this year but there are tons of amazing films, if you’re in LA go go go! Vamos!

I don’t know about you all but today is a big day… it is Good Friday for those who celebrate and it is also the LA stop on the Railroad Revival Tour so I am busy celebrating, remembering, singing and eating Five Guys (the restaurant, pervs). BUUTTT I thought we should take a second to have a laugh courtesy of Chris Weitz and his Twitter. At some point (who knows when) he tweeted a link to his favorite funny Twilight video. It just happens to come from The Onion so you KNOW it’s gonna be gooood.

Sit back for a minute enjoy this and have a wonderful Holiday weekend.

Worse than when Sam phased and slashed his beloved Emily in the face” and the terroist in a Twilight tshirt?! Someone’s a HIGH-larious fan at the Onion. It’s so much win that I can’t even quote all my favorite parts… It’s like they wire tapped a Twihard event, or just copied word for word Twibloggers posts from the nets.

For the last few years since we’ve started LTT and LTR and since reading the books, podcasting with the guys and whatnot I’ve had this thought roaming around my twi-addled brain but never felt ready to tackle it… then recently both Chris Weitz and Stephenie Meyer spoke about the very thing I had been wondering… are there really any “Edwards” out there or are they all actually “Jacobs?”

Recently, a Christ Weitz follower tweeted him asking if he was Team Jacob or Team Edward and this was his response:

This guy's a "jacob?" *swoon*

I am a Jacob. So that has to be my team, by default. Except really, honestly, I’m team Bella.@chrisweitz.

First I loved him more because he self identifies as a “Jacob” but it got me to thinking since most guys I know have said they’re a “Jacob” and most ladies say they married a “Jacob” IS ANYONE ever an Edward? Has any guy self identified as an “Edward?” And has anyone every really gotten their “Edward?” An “Edward” being the seemingly unattainable, hot, sorta-pretty-much perfect guy who you think would never give you the time of day.

Yup, definitely a Jacob

After being in this “world” for many years I would say that a majority of married Twilight lovers would say they married their “Jacob.” Many of our fellow bloggers and even Stephenie herself has said this. She mentioned that marrying Pancho was like marrying her Jacob. Stephenie also had this to say about Rob and Taylor in her recent interview with USA Today…

On working with Pattinson and Lautner: “Rob is more like Jacob than Edward. He’s goofy, he’s funny, he doesn’t take much seriously. But he can turn Edward on like that (she snaps her fingers) when he needs to be Edward. Taylor’s who we hang out with most. He’s a lot like fun, happy Jacob.” – Stephenie Meyer in USA Today

Wait, this guys a Jacob??

It’s ok, Rob/Edward fans, you can peel yourself off the floor now and let’s come to terms with the fact that Rob is not and never was Edward. Not that UC and I ever thought that because we’ve pretty much pegged him as a super nerd from day one yet it keeps bringing up the question: If these guys are all “Jacobs” then are all men out there really Jacobs? Or can some of them beEdwards and then become Jacobs?

Furthermore (oh big transitional words!) if most guys end up being Jacobs than what does that say about the Twilight story and Bella and Edward’s relationship? Is it really the stuff of fantasy because there are no “Edwards” in real life? And if that’s true have we finally found the reason why Twilight is so popular, because it’s a fantasy in every sense of the word?

That's a whole lotta Jacobs right there

So do I have an Edward to look forward to or should I just stop ignoring the Jacobs of my life and realize that though he may not sparkle he’s pretty darn fabulous and he might also be able to fix that weird squeaky sound my cars been making.

Here’s to the Jacobs!
Themoonisdown

Thoughts? Who’s married/dated/engaged to their Jacob? Do you think any guy is every REALLY an Edward? Are all men Jacobs at the end of the day?