Wearing your letter hoody and Brooks Brothers boxers to the urologist so that he knows that even though your weiner is small you still get laid. TFM.

“Damn this kid’s dick is small. But he’s wearing a frat hoody and Brooks Bros boxers so at least he still gets laid.”

I’ll take hate for this any day of the week, but some of my childhood friends are non-affluent GDIs and I absolutely hold them to the same exact standard/tier as I do any other Greek affiliates. Don’t forget where you came from and who was with you. TFM.

Do so much less than you’re currently doing.

When people start noticing your gainz and say you’re on steroids. Fucking right I’m on steroids and cocain. TFM.

Alright, calm down psycho.

Robbing your rival fraternity blind when they all leave for formal. TFM.

That’s a crime, brother.

When you’re at the party drinking and just looking around the room knowing so many of the girls are going to catch your D over the years. TFM.

Cruising around campus in your bro’s 2007 Jetta just stunting on GDIs and making sorosties squirt. TFM.

Got my first blowjob in a 2007 Jetta, actually.

I’ll wait to have sex with you if you really like me. I will just continue to have sex and attempt to have sex with other hot chics. And if, and when you do have sex with me I will add you to my list. How often will I see you? That depends how good you are in bed. In reality, as a Rich and Good Looking guy that lives in So Cal, I don’t wait to have sex. I don’t have to wait. Chics have sex with me when they first meet me. The women I date are Young, Hot and Materialistic. Most importantly, the aforementioned women understand my expectations. And I understand their needs. But I get it as chics near 30, or 22 for that matter they think: “Oh shit I need a nice guy so I can stop working and breed!” ” I have to get Prego before I lego my eggo.” Say good bye to the guys you really like. I might settle down one day with a woman. Although, I doubt I will be completely monogamous. I do want to have kids. If I do settle down, it will be with a Barely Legal, European Chic, who is as close to virginity as possible. Which of course I will never really know. I might hire a Private Investigator. And she is from a Rich Family so……..there you go! The aforementioned Barely Legal, European Girl will bang me in the Hotel Room as soon as it is logistically achievable. Why waste time? So, in the final analysis. No waiting. Thanks.

Dorn won’t get married he’s gonna get be the creepy guy who’s lived in the same run down house in the burbs for 40 years that is literally filled with tons of old newspapers and half empty peanut butter jars

Some MIS major needs to create a site like TFM but with actual frat content and none of the high school pandering. It should require a .edu email address to make a profile so high school/community college kids can’t comment on the site. And no pedophiles like Dorn censoring the content cause he’s over protective of the slutty intern who gave him a drunk bj the first week she got hired. Just sayin’

Judging by how upset you guys are over this, I just want you to know that once you graduate, you might as well just chug some bleach. Life gets a little tougher than “I can’t comment on a website and now I’m mad!!” Fucking grow up and go outside.

“do i think shes a soft 7 with esteem issues? yes” – booger_sugar…anyone of you would cream in your jeans if this broad talked to you at a bar. fuck outta here with that shit. she actually seems like a decent person. not only that…but her column has been the fun one for the past few weeks. we have her, jtrain and tinder lines, and i have a feeling she was probably sitting around the office choked up just for doing her job. i doubt she has to answer our questions. but she was a champ about it and took a lot of shit and it was fun. but now it crossed the line . its time to admit we fucked up.

This is in no way a defense of everyone’s two favorite punching bags, but I kinda of understand the difference between making unsubstantiated pedophilia claims and ganging up on an anonymous intern for dropping a column late and digging up actual legal dirt on someone and broadcasting it in such a public light. Assuming Sidney hops off the TFM staff dick and pursues other career opportunities one day, this shit will really come back to haunt her. And i cant really justify ruining someone’s career prospects just because she’s a bitch online and her content manager couldn’t squat a bendy straw. Im no internet tough guy. Go ahead and lap it, but that’s my 2 cents.

I agree, 144. Some of y’all have taken this too far. A lot of you are trying way too hard to be funny, and the fact that y’all chose to surface a mugshot on TFM in order to do that is crossing the line. Yeah, it’s on public record, but do you truly feel that kind of hatred toward a girl you’ve never met? There are other ways to get upvotes, and that needs to be known. It’s one thing to harmlessly criticize the staff and those affiliated with them, but most of what I saw earlier was absolutely demoralizing. It’s a satirical, college humor site, and I get that. There is a limit, however, and a lot of y’all have far surpassed it.

Not only does some of it completely cross the line, it’s getting pretty fucking stale. NFL article? ‘Fuck Sidney.’ Self-serving, frequently self-commenting siblings column? ‘Fuck Sidney.’ Censorship isn’t the only making this site suck recently. Its the complete lack of commenter originality, all trying to get a rise out of the writers. tl;dr it’s over the line and stopped being funny/entertaining a while ago

I do think the picture was too much, but I think you can write whatever you want in this website, at the end of the days it’s what makes it great. Digging dirt was shitty and over the line, but I think the intern and all the staff know what kind of animals they are dealing with, specially on a friday afternoon where I assure you most people are drunk. I agree with you with the lack of originality and eventually people will vote them down, hurt their egos and they will stop posting.
tl;dr digging dirt was shitty, writing and offending staff members it’s 90% of this website and shouldn’t be censor.

Down vote me all you want, but it’s pathetic that someone would take the time to search for that and post it on a site where she’s interning. Do I think she’s a soft 7 who has self-esteem issues? Yes. But we’re fraternal GENTLEMEN and need to act like we have a little class.

Ok this is my last comment on this topic. Dorn you fucked up royally this week and I think you’re a clown. BUT, I understand that things went over the line. I get that there is a difference between attacking a person and ridiculing a faceless online persona, even if it was just for kicks. It was wrong to dig shit up on a person and as a man I get that its not right. Lap me all you fucking want to guys but I’m man enough to realize when I take things too far. And dont tell me it didnt get out of hand because it fucking did. Ok Im done.

It’s a public record, if any of us can find it any legit company would be able to find it too. I agree with you at certain point but at the same time, this has never stopped TFM of posting pictures of dumb asses that committed crimes and have mugshots.

It’s a shame the way you guys run this website. Closing a comment section just because you disagree with it is not what our funding fathers would’ve liked. There’s other ways of addressing problems than with your dictatorship. Specially because at the end of the day, us the users are the ones that make this website what it is.

Having a mugshot for theft, no matter how petty, will seriously affect your career prospects. I know we all have done things we aren’t proud of, I know I certainly have, but its not like an employer will not find that. I know at least where I work that any sort of criminal charge related to theft, violence, or sex is an automatic termination and will disqualify you for working for the company. Just my .02 from the corporate world.

Its still her dirty laundry. If you’ve made it to the waning years of your undergrad without any baggage, you didn’t have much of a college experience. But it’s still kind of a bitch move to bring that stuff up on in a forum prospect. public knowledge or not. I hope I’m making sense to at least some people

Serious question Dillon, how the fuck did you get a bid for a fraternity?

How did you go from fraternity gentleman to the cock sucker you are today?

I know your advertisers don’t like rush tits and some of the things we say are not the nicest, but really, your website is going to shit because you are taking away some of the hallmarks of fraternity life from a website that is supposedly all about fraternity life.

You can’t speak at all Dorn, you work for a satirical website targeted for college students and highschoolers. This is your job, I feel bad for your parents knowing their son is working at a mediocre company called grandex

Dorn, please turn the comment section off permanently on all articles. Grandex will fold and you will be out of BOTH a job AND Sydney’s ham wallet. Because there’s no way she will go from telling her friends she’s dating the “VP of a tech startup” to the “lead fry engineer at a fast casual conglomerate.”

And whoever fucking lapped me within 2 seconds of me posting this because you didn’t take the time to read the whole thing, fuck off. You should be studying for your remedial math final at whatever shitty satellite state school you go to because you can’t get accepted to the real thing.

serious question you guys but how did they think having a moderately attractive blonde undergrad intern posting on behalf of the site and answering a weekly q&a was going to work out? like, well? also I bet shit is real awkward around the office right now.

This comment section right here single handily proves that at least 3% of Greek life isn’t worth a mold covered shit in a bucket. You give the other guys a bad rep, congratulations on ruining America and my good name. Now, go swim with a toaster.