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Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Price is Paid

A woman once came to me and told me she had been unfaithful to her husband. Another told me she had an abortion, and yet another told me she had been intimate with many men. All of these actions took place before these women were Christians and yet all of these women struggled with remaining guilt and shame. None of them said they experienced freedom in their Christian lives, and they all said they felt used, dirty and damaged.

Such is the state of our world. In this generation of “free love” and “easy sex” we find things are not so easy, and all these things have a price to be paid.

Each of them tell me that they cannot forgive themselves these past indiscretions, and in the case of the woman who aborted her child, she says she cannot forgive herself of killing the child.

All the women are church going women who hide behind a mask of fear of being exposed. They fear someone, anyone finding out who they are and what they have done so they isolate. They may attend your Bible study or small group or prayer circle but let me assure you, they are very alone, trapped in a secret world of pain.

They do penance of various kinds, wrongly thinking that some sort of restitution is needed and required by God. One woman promotes marriage weekends, another volunteers at the crisis pregnancy center, and the last one works in youth group hoping to steer young woman away from her path of promiscuity.

These women need to realize that help and hope and healing are available to them in Christ. This business of forgiving yourself is not a biblical principle. No where in the Bible do we find Jesus telling anyone to forgive themselves. The women I wrote about today have read the account of the adulterous woman in John 8, and are familiar with Mary Magdalene, and the woman who wept at the feet of Jesus.None of these women asked Jesus how to forgive herself, they sought His forgiveness. When they received it, they obeyed His command to sin no more in this manner. They became His followers and lived their lives for Him.

We could learn a lot from these women and their immediate response to Jesus. When Jesus forgave them, it was done. His forgiveness was complete and total. When He forgave you, it was finished the ransom was paid and you were freed!

Oh, but you feeeel like you must do something, it is too easy to just place it at the foot of the cross, you must pay a price or have a penalty- something! The guilty feelings that you hang on to that you somehow believe will help atone for your sin are actually adding sin to your heart and life!

To ever think that you can add anything to His payment for your sin or to think you’re your self abuse will obtain forgiveness is blasphemy. If Jesus’ sacrifice was incomplete, our redemption is not assured and God is a liar.

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About: Biblical Counseling for Women

Welcome to the blog! It is connected to my website by the same name (biblicalcounselingforwomen.org). I have been involved in Biblical Counseling and Discipleship for more than 20 years. I am passionate about the critical need for heart change in a person who desires change in their life.

I am the founder and Director of Reigning Grace Counseling Center (ACBC, IABC, AABC Certified Training Center) and Biblical Counseling for Women. I have been writing this blog on counseling issues women face since 2008.

My extensive training has led to certification with the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (formerly NANC)), the American Association of Biblical Counselors (AABC), and the International Association of Biblical Counselors (IABC) where I function as the State Coordinator for Missouri. I am also on the Counsel Board for the Biblical Counseling Coalition.

I have authored numerous books and materials for biblical counseling, and co-authored a biblical counseling training course. I am also a featured contributor in GriefShare and a frequent retreat and conference speaker.

I make my home in Kansas City, Missouri. with my wonderful husband. Our 3 sons are grown, and until the grandbabies come I am content to spoil our sweet little Chihuahuas, Buddy and Bambi.

You can find information about my biblical counseling ministries at rgcconline.org, and biblicalcounselingforwomen.org

I know many women are searching for the key to real and lasting change in their lives. They are tired of the self-help approach which is nothing more than rearranging the flesh. They want to escape the cycle of habitual sin that enslaves them. They want something that will work. They want to live the victorious life they hear about on Sunday mornings but cannot seem to make a part of their daily reality.

I hope you will see that you no longer need to live as though you are still in bondage to sin- you are victorious in Christ and He has already set you free. That truth is not found in any self-help book, or in being better or trying harder, it is found through changes in the inner man, the immaterial part of you that the Bible refers to as the heart.

You will find my heart here, in progress. I make no claims that I have "arrived" but I post my thoughts, reflections, and part of my life for your growing.

Spend some time reading the blog, and leave a comment if you like. Just please note that I reserve the right to use your comments (without your name of course) in any future posting or material for publication. Don't forget to visit the websites! I trust you will be blessed.

Reigning Grace Counseling Center

biblicalcounselingforwomen

Materials

To help you in growing and changing in the ways I write about here on the blog, I have posted the titles of the books and materials I have written. You may decide to acquire some of these materials to help you, or for you to use to help others. All of these materials are published by Pure Water Press and available through Amazon