Seven Beatitudes for Successful Co-Parenting – Part 4

Be Perceptive

Exod. 2:4-8 Moses’ sister stood at a distance to see what would happen to him. Then Pharaoh’s daughter went down to the Nile to bathe and her attendants were walking along the riverbank. She saw the basket among the reeds and sent her slave girl to get it. She opened it and saw the baby. He was crying, and she felt sorry for him. “This is one of the Hebrew babies.” she said. Then Moses’ sister asked Pharaoh’s daughter, “Shall I go and get one of the Hebrew women to nurse the baby for you?” “”Yes, go.” she answered. And the girl went and got the baby’s mother.

Moses’ family had the presence of mind not only to remove their baby from imminent danger, but to watch and wait and take further action for his safety. Then they trusted God for the rest.

It is difficult during a personal crisis, like a divorce, to think calmly, clearly and to place focus on those who are most at risk. Our children of divorce are at risk. Parents can come to the rescue simply by being perceptive.

Stop…During the aftermath of divorce, it takes a very deliberate effort to stop focusing on ourselves and start focusing on the children.

One of the many myths of our culture is that divorce automatically rescues children from an unhappy marriage. But statistics have shown that children do not say they are happier. In fact, the majority of these children say their lives ended when their parents divorced. Be open and willing to take notice of the realities created by divorce so that you can be perceptive to their needs.

Children do not possess adult skills to understand their emotions, much less to find the words to express them. Parents must learn to pay close attention to behavior .

Pay close attention to the response, uncritically, unemotionally and courageously. Children cannot help the feelings they have. Knowing what goes on in a child’s mind is over half the battle.

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Disclaimer:

Krista Smith is not a licensed counselor. Any comments or suggestions she makes are only based on her personal experience and what she has learned through working with hundreds over the past 15 years of experience. If you are seeking professional help, please seek a licensed therapist.

Slippery Slope Game

The Slippery Slope is a new interactive board game designed to help players open up and deal with their emotions and feelings that are associated with the grief they feel when they are separated, going through a divorce, or living through the aftermath of a single parent family. The Slippery Slope game will help you guide your kids through the emotional process of grief while sharing grace and forgiveness.