BS SHOW BIZ BUZZ:
TONIGHT & tomorrow “American Idol” becomes a kind of telethon with ‘Idol Gives Back‘ in which sponsors donate money to charity for every vote cast by audience members (TOMORROW’s results show features a slew of entertainers from Gwen Stefani to Kelly Clarkson) . . . Now that Sanjaya Malakar has been given the boot, pasty Phil Stacey is now the target of VotefortheWorst.com, the website that asks users to intentionally vote for a bad “American Idol” contestant (the site’s special message to Phil: “We love you even if you can’t be exposed to direct light!”) . . . Oh, and Sanjaya says he plans to pursue a career in music & acting and the first thing he’ll knock off his ‘to do’ list is – hiring a bodyguard (to keep Fanjayas from getting too close to his hair?) . . . This may catch on elsewhere – Florida’s Senate has passed ‘Truth in Music’ legislation that bars oldies acts from using famous names to which they’re not entitled, meaning famous-name acts will need at least 1 original member to perform in the state (there are like 27 acts touring as ‘The Platters’, who are mostly all dead) . . . Russia’s Premera theater company plans to create a new ballet about the life & death of Princess Diana that’s expected to open in Moscow THIS AUTUMN (instead of a pas de deux, it’ll feature a pas de trois) . . . A shrewd publisher in Britain has changed the title of an upcoming book about the relationship of Prince William & his ex-, Kate Middleton, from “William & Kate: The Love Story” to “William & Kate: The End Of The Affair” (thereby cutting its losses) . . . Word is “Spider-Man 3” (opening MAY 4th) might be the most expensive movie ever made as “Radar” magazine claims the budget may be over $500 million (a lot of it for CGI enhancements to make Tobey Maguire’s bug-eyes less creepy) . . . And a listing in the new business magazine “The American” of the ‘Most Overpaid Underperforming Celebrities’ includes actress Halle Berry ($16 million apiece for clunkers like “Gothika” & “Catwoman”); TV news anchor Katie Couric ($15 million to lose ratings on the “CBS Evening News”); and pseudo-actress Sharon Stone ($14 million for the dud “Basic Instinct 2”).

BS MUSIC NOTES:
• Amy Winehouse – TONIGHT she sings on the “Tonight Show With Jay Leno” (NBC/A Channel).
• Coldplay – TODAY their special-edition box set collection “The Singles 1999-2006” is released, containing all 14 single releases on 7-inch vinyl discs in sleeves with the original artwork. There will be no CD release. So what are people gonna play these on?
• Corinne Bailey Rae – TONIGHT she performs on “Late Show With David Letterman” (CBS).
• Jennifer Lopez – She’s the latest entertainer to pick up big bucks for a private performance. Russian banker Andrei Melnichenko (worth a reported $5 billion) paid her $2 million for a 40-minute gig at his wife’s 30th birthday party in London. That’s $50,000 a minute! He also paid Christina Aguilera a fortune to sing at his wedding 2 years ago.
• Leonard Cohen – TODAY there’s an expanded digital re-release his first 3 albums (“Songs of Leonard Cohen”-1967, “Songs From a Room”-1968, “Songs of Love & Hate”-1971) that includes several previously unreleased tracks.
• Michael Buble – The 31-year-old crooner has now proposed to his movie actress-girlfriend Emily Blunt (“The Devil Wears Prada”) both in the Canadian Edition of “Hello!” magazine and during a recent radio interview. Are we afraid of rejection in person, dude?
• Paula Abdul – TONIGHT she blathers on “Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” (CBS).
• Stevie Nicks – THIS AFTERNOON she’s a guest on the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” (syndicated/CityTV).
• The Stooges – TONIGHT Iggy Pop’s original band is on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” (ABC).
• Whitney Houston – TODAY the 43-year-old singer is finally free of her 38-year-old freeloading ex-, Bobby Brown, as their divorce becomes final.

TODAY’S VIDEO RELEASES:
• “Code Name: The Cleaner” ( Comedy ): Cedric the Entertainer stars as a seemingly regular guy who wakes up with a bump on his head in a hotel room next to a dead body and a briefcase containing $250,000 in cash. Though he can’t remember how he got there or who he is, he eventually becomes convinced he’s an undercover agent for the CIA. Co-stars Nicollette Sheridan (“Desperate Housewives”) & Lucy Liu (“Kill Bill”). Shot entirely in Vancouver.
• “Deja Vu” ( Sci-fi Thriller ): Denzel Washington plays an ATF agent who’s unexpectedly guided through an investigation into a bombing incident by deja vu. Along the way he discovers his connection to a woman whose past holds the key to stopping a catastrophe. Co-stars Paula Patton, Val Kilmer & James Caviezel.
• “Night at the Museum” ( Comedy Fantasy ): Ben Stiller stars as a bumbling security guard on the graveyard shift at the Museum of Natural History who accidentally lets loose an ancient curse that causes the animals and insects on display to come to life and wreak havoc. The supporting cast includes Robin Williams, Carla Gugino, Owen Wilson and – as veteran security guards – Mickey Rooney & Dick Van Dyke. Also available in a 2-disc ‘Special Edition’.
• “The Queen” ( Drama ): Helen Mirren won a ‘Best Actress’ Oscar for her portrayal of Elizabeth II attempting to deal with the aftermath of Princess Diana’s death in 1997. Michael Sheen co-stars as the British Prime Minister. Based on extensive research, interviews, discreet sources, and informed imagination.
• Also released TODAY: “Columbo: Mystery Movie Collection”; “The Drew Carey Show: The Complete 1st Season”; “Flipper The Original Series: Season 1”; “Grease: We Go Together 2-Pack”; “James Cagney: The Signature Collection”; “The Lost Tomb of Jesus” TV documentary; and “WKRP in Cincinnati: The Complete 1st Season”.

MOST SATISFYING JOBS:
According to the recent General Social Survey by the National Opinion Research Center, these are the jobs that give those holding them down the most personal satisfaction …
5. Special-Ed Teachers (70% satisfaction rate).
4. Authors (74%)
3. Physical Therapists (78%)
2. Firefighters (80%)
1. Clergy (87%)
– AP

THE HP CALCIUM PRINTER:
Scientists at Montréal’s McGill University are creating artificial bones using a modified version of an inkjet printer. The technology creates perfect replicas of bones that have been damaged which can then be inserted into the body. The ‘paper’ in the printer is actually a thin bed of cement-like powder. The inkjets spray the cement with an acid which reacts with it to make it harden. The layers are then built up to the shape dictated by a computer. It takes just 10 minutes to crank out a typical bone graft. A team of scientists at Britain’s Manchester University has borrowed the concept to develop a similar printing method to make sheets of artificial skin. (Soon [co-host] will be able to build himself an entire girlfriend!)
– “Fortean Times”

ROBOT RIGHTS:
An association of the world’s top robotics experts is preparing the first ethical guidelines for human-robot relationships. The ‘Robot Ethics Charter’ will be unveiled later THIS YEAR. As the technology quickly advances, robots will soon have their own ‘internal states’ such as motivation to perform and even emotion, according to the scientists who are creating them. It’s thought that we will someday come to treat them in the same way we now take care of our pets. (Oh no, something else that needs to go for a walk at 5 am in the morning!)
– “The Independent”

CAN’T REMEMBER WHY YOU HATE CAMPING?
Before you go hiking this summer you might want to get familiar with the ‘Schmidt Sting Pain Index’ in order to figure out which nasty biting insects to avoid most. Developed by entomologist Justin O Schmidt, who has been stung by almost every insect imaginable, it ranks the pain caused by stinging insects from ‘0′ (completely ineffective against humans) to ‘4′ (pure, intense, brilliant pain). A few highlights …
• Fire Ant (level 1.2) – Like walking across a shag carpet and reaching for the light switch.
• Bullhor Acacia Ant (level 1.8) – As if someone has fired a staple into your cheek.
• Bald-Faced Hornet (level 2.0) – Similar to getting your hand mashed in a revolving door.
• Red Harvester Ant (level 3.0) – Like somebody is using a drill to excavate your ingrown toenail.
• Pepsis Wasp (level 4.0) – You might as well lie down and scream.
• Bullet Ant (level 4.0+) – Like walking over flaming charcoal … with a 3-inch nail in your heel.
– “Curious Times”

TOWN FULL OF WOMEN:
China is set to create the world’s first official ‘Woman Town’ where women make all the decisions and disobedient men face punishments like kneeling on a board or doing dishes. The 1.5-square-mile Shuangqiao District in Chongqing city will have the slogan: “A woman never makes a mistake. A man can never reject a woman’s request” carved into the area’s gateway. It is expected to be a Mecca for female tourists. (But not guys … they can get this kinda treatment at home.)
– “The Iconoclast”

HAIR OF THE DOG:
London-based Trimega Laboratories has developed a method of determining how much alcohol an individual has consumed during past months or even years by analyzing chemicals in the hair. Current blood or urine tests only record alcohol that’s been consumed in the previous few days but this new test measures fatty acid derivatives that are absorbed into the hair as the alcohol in the body is broken down. But it ain’t cheap – the examination costs nearly $700. (A more inexpensive method: check your bank account online.)
– “Daily Mail”

VANISHED!
Rescuers in Australia have found a 12-m (40-ft) yacht floating off the Queensland coast with engine running; food on the table ready-to-eat; a laptop computer on; radio & GPS working … but no crew! The boarding party says everything appeared normal except for the missing 3 men from Perth. A massive search has been launched. (… for a screenwriter.)
– “NZ Herald”

TIME-LAPSED KID:
Deb Roy, the director of the Cognitive Machines Group at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, is recording his 1-year-old son’s entire life using 11 cameras & 14 microphones embedded in the ceilings of his house. The goal of his 3-year ‘Human Speechome Project’ is to capture the entire process of early language acquisition, which he hopes to use as a blueprint for teaching robots. He’s already captured more than 120,000 hours of footage. (Oh man, finally something more boring that your dad’s excruciating vacation videos.)
– “Wired”

FOR THE RECORD:
It’s the ultimate fish story! The crew of a charter boat out of Destin FL have hauled in a 1,063-lb Mako Shark measuring 12-ft, 6-ins … more than half the size of the boat. They hooked the beast while fishing in the Gulf of Mexico; had to harpoon it to bring it in; then called a bigger boat to bring it to shore. The shark is being investigated for a world record.
– AHN

BS AMAZING FACT:
A hockey fan is 80% more likely than an average Canadian to have purchased a high-definition TV in the past 2 years.
– MediaInCanada.com
Despite their savvy, 63% of teens with online profiles believe a ‘motivated person’ could eventually identify them from that information.
– PewInternet.org

1940 [67] Sue Grafton, Louisville KY, top-selling mystery novelist who’s published in 28 countries and 26 languages (her fictional detective ‘Kinsey Millhone’ has appeared in alphabetical best-sellers all the way from “A is for Alibi” to “S is for Silence”) UP NEXT: “T Is for Trespass”, to be published DECEMBER 4, 2007.

TODAY’S BS REASONS TO PARTY . . .
• “Ambivalence Day”, which we’re not sure how to celebrate or even if it’s worth the effort.

• “Pigs in a Blanket Day” when we’re encouraged to cook up some sausage; make some pancakes; then wrap the sausage inside of a pancake; add maple syrup … and chow down!

• “World Lab Animal Day”, founded by the National Anti-Vivisection Society and recognized by the UN on behalf of the – quote – ‘billions of animals who are burnt, sliced, crushed, electrocuted, gassed, poisoned with toxic chemicals, psychologically tormented, and killed each year in laboratories around the world.’ (As opposed to those we just eat.)
NET: http://www.navs.org.uk/media_centre/35/0/750/

TODAY’S MUSIC EVENT . . .
1992 [15] Rocker David Bowie & fashion model Iman are married in a secret ceremony in Switzerland