I take back everything I said about immigration! Thanks, foreigners!!

For decades, we racist troglodytes tried to warn you: those immigrants you say you love? They bring more to Canada than spicy food and colorful costumes.

They have their own “Old Country” values, and those may not be compatible with “your” Canada, or “mine.”

Oh, sure. They force a thin smile onto their faces, and nod politely at the watercooler when you tell them how much fun you and your children had at the Gay Pride Parade over the weekend. They pretend to sympathize when you pretend to worry about putting granny in a home. While you giggle at the latest adventures on Sex and the City, the pretty 25-year-old Hindu virgin in the cubicle next to you thinks about her two wedding gowns and hopes you won’t try to include her in the conversation.

The other “funny” meme, the one that was really popular in the hours leading up to the vote tally?

“Gravy train.” It was Rob Ford’s catchphrase. He vows to cut off the gravy train that saw, among other things, a retiring counsellor throwing himself a 5-figure farewell party during a recession. With taxpayer money.

A retiring counsellor who just happens to be gay.

Last night on CP24, chubby, washed up drug addict, The Former Lead Singer for the Former Barenaked Ladies, quipped to Ben Mulroney, “Hey, a ‘gravy train’ sounds delicious! Ha ha.”

You brought them over here, not me. You supposedly need them to drive the cabs I don’t take, and be the nannies I don’t need and the housekeepers I can’t afford, and run the restaurants only you get to eat in and run the shops you’re too lazy or prissy to own yourselves.

So did lots of the “ethnic” people at your office, assuming there are any there, and there may not be, come to think of it.

They won’t admit it. They don’t want to get fired.

And besides, they’re just patiently waiting for the day that your spoiled, lazy children — assuming you have children at all — are working for their disciplined, accomplished offspring.

The day “corporate” pulls its sponsorship of Pride Month, and dumps its expensive, exquisitely useless “environmentally friendly” policies overboard, and quietly stops hiring spindly, neurotic, overeducated white women (who take way too much time off dragging their kids to endless appointments — if they have children, that is.)

And there will be nothing you can do about it.

They’re “minorities.” You gave them all kinds of special rights. No one is allowed to criticize them. “It’s their culture,” remember?

This was all your idea, guys. Not mine.

I owe you a latte!

You never could get this right, could you? It’s a Bible thing, after all:

North of the border, a fat white right-winger beat a gay liberal to get elected Mayor of Toronto and the media have fallen back on how his landslide is the last gasp of old, vengeful, angry white males.

In a far less deluded analysis, Kathy Shaidle has one of the best posts I’ve read on the internal contradictions of the multicultural society. In the very year that Toronto became a “majority minority” society, a liberal homosexual (and married gay parent) goes down to a far greater defeat than any of the Trudeaupian establishment predicted.

Well, who do you think voted against him, geniuses?

A few months after 9/11, I was strolling along the Boulevard de Maisonneuve in Montréal. Across the street there was an “adult” shop with its window full of very explicit gay sex paraphernalia. Struggling past it, laden with shopping bags, was a Muslim woman covered from head to toe. It’s not hard to figure where we’re going:

In ten years’ time, the Muslim woman will still be here, along with many others. The gay sex shop will be gone.