Next time you find yourself with a gun to your head, a suggestion: Slap on an outrageous grin and bust your best moves through undulating bolts of colorful fabric and a phalanx of bhangra-ing backup dancers. If you know anything at all about Bollywood movies, you’ll know it works every time.

For Iram Parveen Bilal, a USC grad student and self-professed Bollywood nut, this was the last chance to join the school’s Anjaane Hindi film dance team before receiving her degree. The lone Islamic member of the team — she’s from Islamabad, Pakistan — Iram took full advantage…with a couple of costume alterations.

Participants in Bollywood film dance troupe competitions are nothing if not serious about winning… Didrik and I studied the oeuvre extensively and came up with this plan for world domination. Watch and learn.

Bollywood film dance troupe competitions are the bomb: What college kid doesn’t want to dress in outrageous costumes and undulate with enthusiastic members of the opposite sex? Arranged marriages can wait. Bring the bhangra!