9. First Pregnancy: You diligently avoid all caffeine, alcohol, sushi and other supposed pregnancy no-nos.

Second Pregnancy: “Make it a DOUBLE ESPRESSO. And bring it up to the bathroom where I’m going to be snorting aspirin in a steaming hot bath. Thanks!”

8. First Pregnancy: “Yay! I’m starting to show!”

Second Pregnancy: “Oh, God. I’m starting to show. AND I’M ONLY ONE WEEK PREGNANT.”

7. First Pregnancy: You play French folk music and Learn Japanese CDs before going to sleep in hopes of giving birth to a multilingual genius with an IQ of 150.

Second Pregnancy: Screw the folk music. Nothing wrong with having a child of mediocre intelligence! Because, let’s face it, you want to go to sleep as soon as you can when you already have a child with another on the way.

6. First Pregnancy: You feel the baby kick around 20 weeks.

Second Pregnancy: You feel the baby kick around 12 weeks. And why is that? “Your muscles aren’t as strong the second time around, so you feel it more,” the OB says “helpfully.” *SIGH* A simple “you’re more in-tune with your body” would have sufficed, doc.

PregnancyHumor celebrates the funnier side of being pregnant with jokes, cartoons, top 10 lists, charts, eCards, videos and columns from moms-to-be. Because what better way to welcome Baby into the world than surrounded by laughter?
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