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Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Traumatized as a Child

As foster parents, we see the results of true trauma in our children. It reminds me daily of how very fortunate I am that my scars are minuscule and were unintentionally inflicted. Oh, I was traumatized alright! Just not in the ways you might immediately think if you are in the foster parent mindset.

The Big Scary Barn

The Barn that Moo-ed - It looks innocent enough, right? A fun little barn with cute little animals and farmers and such to entertain a young child for hours... Not I, my friends! That stinkin' barn let out a "moo" louder than fighter jet every time you opened the door. If my animals couldn't fit in the hayloft, they just had to hang out in the elements because you'd better believe I wasn't about to let whatever giant monster cow that was hiding inside out of there! Here I sit, a 38-year-old grown woman, and I'm having heart palpitations just thinking about it.

Oh, How Sweet...

The Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer Movie - Sure... Rudolph and his little girlfriend look all sweet and adorable. They lure small children in with his shiny red nose and make them feel sorry for the poor little guy when the big reindeer make fun of him. Just when you're feeling comfortable watching and are fully invested in cheering the sad and lonely mammal on despite the odd claymation setting, they throw this in your face!

What the HECK?!?

WHY?!? Why would they DO that to unsuspecting little children?!? That is seriously uncool. To this day, I flip the channel to something else... Anything else... any time this made-for-television movie comes on. That googly-eyed abominable snowman still gives me the heebie jeebies, and you'd better believe I will not be subjecting Bug and Monkey to this kind of childhood trauma. Not ever!

The Face of Trauma in the Making

Spit-Cleaning - There are certain things that I swore I would never do to my children. Licking my fingers to clean their faces was one of them. I still remember the feeling of slimy fingers to my face as my mom scrubbed away at one thing or another. I think she must have missed the memo declaring spit-cleaning must stop by the age of 2 (3 at the very latest) in order to ensure those memories remain locked away and never remembered. I remember watching in horror as Ryan Seacrest did the unthinkable to Idol contestant Haley Reinhart one fateful evening and spit-cleaned red lipstick off of her face in front of millions on live television. If that isn't trauma, I don't know what is! I can almost guarantee that poor girl still has nightmares. I know I do, and I haven't been spit-cleaned in well over thirty years!

Can't Believe I Did This to My Baby!

Yes, I was traumatized. Fortunately, not enough to need psychiatric intervention... I was lucky in that my mother never once took me to see Santa Claus at the mall. "Lucky," you might question, "Don't all children want to see Santa?" I urge you to take a look at what I did to poor Monkey for his first Christmas, and tell me if this looks like "he wanted to see Santa" to you.

What about you? Do you have PTSD flashbacks from seemingly good things gone wrong from your early years? Please tell me you do so I don't feel so weird about sharing mine! Lol!

1 comment:

My brother ran over my foot on a go kart....my Dad didn't believe I was hurt and made me walk around on it for a day before finally getting it xrayed, it was broken and I was scarred for life with a fear of go karts

About Me

Entering my 7th year as a single foster (now ADOPTIVE) mom. Most days I think "I Must Be Trippin'" when I talk about all of the craziness that is Foster/Adopt Land in one breath, and how much I LOVE MY LIFE in the next. Because I DO love my life, and I wouldn't change a thing.

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My "Butterflies"

"Monkey" - 5/2011 to present - 2 months old at placement - officially R/U with Bio Dad in 3/2012 - Continues to stay with me four nights a week while his daddy works - Still "Mommy" after 3 1/2 years... :-)