Lovemotherhood created on Oct 17 2011 when I was 34 weeks pregnant for our 4th busy bee.
I am a communicator by qualification and thought that because I am a professional skills development practitiner, this blog shall aim at sharing information with loving parents. Lovemotherhood is for all parents as motherhood is not independent fatherhood. Other men in our lives could be parents, husbands, boyfriends, brothers, you name them; yet an integral part of our kids' lives..

Friday, May 31, 2013

What’s “Fear” in Parenting and relationships?

Fear!

It’s one of the worst four letter words in our language! Fear holds us back
from so many things that could be great in our lives. Fear makes us
procrastinate. Fear makes us physically sick. Fear holds us back from being
great people and doing great things be it is business, relationships, hobbies,
and so much more! FEAR is and ENEMY. I’m sorry to be so harsh, but let’s tell
it like it is … Fear SUCKS! If you have to look at Fear in a positive mode, you
will agree with me that there are certainly times that fear can be a useful
protective mechanism. Fear here could be regarded in lines of parenting or
toward taking steps towards decisions in our business.

So many people read, study, go to seminars, and basically know all there is
to know about investing in their children. They may even participate regularly
on and have every intention of being a good parent, but they have never stood
up to say I did it!!!! Why? You guessed it, FEAR! Fear of the unknown, fear of
being successful (yes this is a real one!), fear of failing, fear of being
embarrassed, fear of sounding dumb, fear of being controlling, fear of being
proud, the list can be long. When we are scared, we make many excuses to avoid
doing the things we fear. The ironic part is that most times our fears are
unwarranted. On the other side of those fears are the very things we desire in
life. We just need to begin.

Basic Steps for Overcoming Fear

Ask yourself: what is the actual fear holding me back from?
Getting clear helps you know exactly what fear(s) you need to overcome.

Ask yourself: Is my fear real and truly warranted?
What’s the worst that can happen? Will my life be over if I proceed? Probably
not!

Write out an action plan to reach your goal.

Many of us do much better with a written plan. It will relieve your anxiety.
Try it!

Take small baby steps every day.

Trap yourself.
Parenting is a fun journey, you won’t have time to be scared, you’re too busy pushing
and being pushed through the steps because the pressure from your children,
friends and relatives is on!

Be accountable to someone else.
Find someone who you trust that will be there to hold you accountable to make
sure you keep moving forward, EVEN IF YOU’RE SCARED! That person could be a
friend, a partner or even your own children.

However for every woman and man, our fears are most often related to failing
our spouses and children.

Don’t Fail them by not practicing innovative Parenting. Learn and work on
your existing skills to not fail them.