‘RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars’: A Shocking Elimination

“RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars” brought back some old friends this week.CreditCreditVH1

By Isaac Oliver

March 2, 2018

Season 3, Episode 6

“Gentlemen, start your engines, and may the best wo —— wait a minute!” RuPaul said before kicking off last episode’s challenge. “I almost forgot.”

The door flung open and back in walked the five eliminated queens: Morgan McMichaels, Thorgy Thor, Milk, Chi Chi DeVayne and Aja. It was very “Dance at the Gym.” They were there to square off, shake things up and, ultimately, RuPaul explained, replace one of the top five. Quite frankly, after two underwhelming episodes, a shake-up felt welcome, even if it did bring back the Morgan, Thorgy and Milk trifecta. (Think “Hocus Pocus,” but without the fun.)

The group gathered around a worktable to air grievances, like the world’s pettiest G8 Summit, for which VH1 eagerly provided a 90-minute episode.

Thorgy, who I imagine sat at the foot of a bed in a dark room until the car came for this episode, needled Trixie on the note that Shangela found — “Did you show her that to get her upset?” — and confronted Shangela about her elimination. “What the hell was that about?” she asked, gesturing to Kennedy, who Shangela had spared. “You guys had some secret, shaking hand, oh-no-matter-what?”

Morgan, who I imagine stepped out of five weeks in a sensory deprivation tank when the car came from this episode, called BenDeLaCreme a hypocrite for sending her home instead of Chi Chi, who’d performed worse.

“It was a hard decision,” BenDeLaCreme said, admitting she’d wanted to eliminate an out-and-out predator. (Morgan, you might remember, planned to eliminate the strongest queens in order to win.)

“When you said, ‘I’m doing the best for the girls,’ you basically told me I wasn’t part of that,” Morgan snapped, and oh my god, that’s it, someone put a wig and makeup on me and teach me how to have a relationship with my body — because I want to send her home.

Milk, who I imagine was being escorted out of a meditation retreat by a monk who’d ended 30 years of silence to do so when the car came for this episode, confronted her eliminator. “You wanted to save your friend,” she told Kennedy, pointing at Chi Chi, who sat there solemnly, perhaps unaware she’d RSVP’d yes to an “It Should’ve Been Chi Chi” round table.

“I just felt there was nothing genuine with you,” Kennedy snapped back.

“What?” Milk whimpered, crying.

“Am I the only one?” Kennedy asked, and the others mumbled in agreement.

The music cut out, and, in a confessional, Milk asked: “Am I an [expletive]?”

(O.K., that was good. I hate to admit it, but if you’ve ever had a vegan cake, you know sometimes you just need milk to make things satisfying.)

For this week’s challenge the current and eliminated queens formed dueling Spice Girls-esque girl groups, creating individual characters and penning lyrics to their own solo verses. They recorded these verses “in the studio” with the guest judge Adam Lambert, who I just think is so cute.

Trixie, as the nympho “I.Q. Girl,” sang too tentatively, and Lambert encouraged her to “be hornier.” (A dream — all I ever needed was the music and the mirror.)

Back in the workroom, Shangela encouraged a bereft BenDeLaCreme to try and patch things up with Morgan, who apologized first: “I felt terrible all day. Truce and peace and all that.”

Milk tried a similar path with Kennedy, but she couldn’t stop herself from claiming she felt “shafted” for having been allowed to walk around like a jerk, unconfronted. (Look, Rome wasn’t built in a day, and Grandiose Narcissistic Personas are well-guarded compounds. Maybe Oprah would let her audit a few SuperSoul Sundays from a third wicker chair, off-camera.)

On the runway, the two Kitty Girl groups performed their choreographed, lip-synced numbers. “Cajun Kitty” Chi Chi had a charming vocal track; Thorgy, as “Cardio Kitty,” hammed it up in a workout leotard; Aja, with a storage unit full of stage presence, was a death-dropping “Lil’ Banjee Kitty.” But the current queens — unsurprisingly; they’re current for a reason — won the challenge.

Trixie, in a pink wig and yellow overall dress, was praised for her clever lyrics and look; Kennedy’s muted “Diva Kitty” performance and purple wig caught the judges’ ire; and “Sparkle Kitty” Shangela charmed the guest judge Emma Bunton, of the Spice Girls. “If y’all ever do a reunion and need a number 6, you call me, O.K.?” said Shangela, who’ll work this show until her calendar’s full.

BenDeLaCreme, spunky-sulky as “Goth Kitty,” was named top two along with BeBe, in head-to-toe leopard print.

“Ra-ca-ca ti-ti ta-ta, what language is that?” Carson Kressley asked.

“It’s an emotion,” BeBe replied.

Backstage, the top two deliberated over which of the remaining three to eliminate. “We’re at the point where everyone’s fierce,” Trixie said, and Shangela added in a confessional, “It’s just a tossup at this point.”

There was also the matter of which eliminated queen to bring back, and they lined up to kiss the ring — “I have so much to give,” Thorgy said; “I want it so bad,” Aja said; “I want to show more,” Morgan said; “I want to grow even bigger,” Milk said (ugh) — except for Chi Chi, smiling and counting the minutes until she could just get in the car and drive. “Girl, the horse is dead,” she said.

BeBe, channeling Shirley Bassey in a beaded floor-length gown, and BenDeLaCreme, in jet-black Cher curls, lip-synced to a remix of Deborah Cox’s “Nobody’s Supposed to Be Here,” a song I’d now like to send out to Adam Lambert, if he’s listening.

BenDeLaCreme was crowned the winner and, wow, chose Morgan to return, telling her, “Make me proud.” The other queens shuddered. (Yikes. End of “A Christmas Carol” this is not.)

The bottom three stepped forward somberly. “This is the easiest choice I’ve had to make all season,” BenDeLaCreme said, and eliminated herself. (What! Can you do that?) “I’m going home,” she continued, as Kennedy, Trixie, and Shangela gasped and cried. “I’m so grateful for my time here; I feel like a winner. I love these girls, and they all deserve a chance.”

This was a shock, a lightning bolt in a hazy season she’d been gliding through like Allison Janney toward Sunday’s Oscars. She was the clearest front-runner, self-possessed and chameleonic, and a benevolent, if up-talky, presence. But the weekly elimination drama got to her, and she was clearly no longer interested in it. “Competition is not ever something I got into this game to be a part of,” she said in an earlier confessional.

“I don’t know how to take this,” RuPaul replied. “As it is written, so it shall be done.”