How To Shed A Post-Divorce Inferiority Complex

A divorce can turn your life upside down. Everything that you were once so sure about becomes questionable. Before you know it, you start wondering if the full blame of the marriage’s failure should rest on your shoulders. It’s understandable especially when someone promises to be with you forever and then decides it’s time to end it. Inferiority complexes are common in the aftermath. You may even start developing unhealthy habits. Here are some ways you can break the cycle and reclaim your power.

One: Know what you can control and what you can’t.

There may be conditions that you have to live with or physical features that can only be corrected through surgery. You can classify these as things that are beyond your control. Be aware of them, but realize you can’t do anything about it. Now turn to the facets of your life that you CAN control. Resolve to make those things the best they can be. Want to lose weight? Look at your diet and exercise. Want to be more productive? Know when your “prime” working times are — day or night — and exploit. You may be imperfect, but guess what: so is everyone else. You can distinguish yourself from most of the population by setting aside your imperfections and making yourself stronger in the areas you can control.

Two: Give back.

When I was divorced, I didn’t think that any other person in the history of civilization had it worse than I did. How wrong was that? Someone always has it worse, and while you can try to make yourself feel better with that bit of knowledge, you’ll have an easier time if you do SOMETHING to give back. Volunteer at a soup kitchen. Give to a children’s hospital — money and/or time. Seek out those who are less fortunate and resolve to do something special. You won’t even have to pat yourself on the back because if you do get involved in helping others, your focus will shift away from yourself and onto the environment around you. This will lead to a more realistic view of the world and your place in it, and you’ll come to a helpful realization: inferiority is an attitude and it’s well within your control.

In Summary

Did you feel like the whole world was better than you after a divorce? How did you get over that feeling, or did you? If not, what’s holding you back?