Eponymous Coward’s Techdirt Comments

Re: Re: Why the Vitriol?

Amen and amen to this. Every time someone uses "Republican X did it first" I want to fucking scream.

Burn them all down, every last one who has broken these rules and violated FEDERAL FUCKING LAW regarding the handling of classified material (which, again, all of these people signed a document acknowledging that content, and not a stamp, determines level of classification). Colin Powell, Jeb Bush, whoever, doesn't matter. Break the law? go to trial. Get convicted? go to jail, do not pass the Oval Office, do not collect a lifetime pension.

Your party affiliation doesn't automatically make you a criminal. Being convicted does, and evidence continues to mount in this case.

Any parent will immediately recognize this behavior. A request (clean your room) becomes a demand, and so the child will comply, but in the shittiest, most half-assed way possible. When problems arise because of the shit implementation of the request (I can't find my tablet because I just threw everything into the closet so my room would be "clean"), the child blames the task and not the execution.

Dear Stupidville PD: When you half-ass a solution, you only get more problems.

Rough analogue?

I don't see the First Amendment implications in the case, though framing the verdict in terms of "what constitutes 'newsworthy'" can skew it more in that direction. How about framing it as "Gawker used an illegal recording to drive that clickbait dollar machine"?

It could've been a video of Hogan and the lady playing Monopoly, still wouldn't change the fact that the recording itself is an illicit thing, apart from definitions of speech rights.

Re:

Comcast hears your concerns, loyal customer. We have included the usage cap of 300GB for your protection, as our crack research scientists have determined that downloading at gigabit speeds will warp space and time in your vicinity. Sustained downloads of more than 300GB could cause unexpected time travel, catapulting users into the distant future or pulling velociraptors into the present time. We know you don't want that, so we added this feature for your protection.

Overage fees will placate the space-time continuum, allowing for more rapid closure of temporal wormholes. Actually, space-time wanted $20 per 50GB (can you believe the nerve?), but we talked it down to $10. You're welcome.

Re: Sooooo...

No, guns are also terrible. In fact, yesterday I watched a pistol walk into an animal shelter and kick puppies for 45 minutes, accompanied by a black forestock grip. It only ended when a federal law entered the room and told the gun it wasn't allowed to be there, at which point the gun promptly apologized and turned itself in to the authorities.

The Final Test

Soon, every autonomous car rolling off the line will have to make one last stop before leaving the factory. They will be required to take virtual command of the Kobayashi Maru to gauge how they cope with a no-win situation.

"I mean, it could be that the great fairyland dragon from the 6th dimension dreamed up the Snowden documents and then gave them to Russia and China."

Well, umm, uhh, we don't want to make conjectures about the fairyland dragon's intentions. All we know is that we leave the offerings of marshmallows and virgins' blood and the stories come to us fully written. I wouldn't know what the fairyland dragon actually did, the government didn't write that bit for us.