A blog written in the dead of night and delivered to you in a brown paper bag. It’s a cornucopia of tidbits, rants, and observations for the discerning eye. Good luck with all that. Now, for something completely different!

OK. am I twisted? Because I find this really funny. A billboard sponsored by a local Anglican church that shows Joseph and Mary in bed has set tongues wagging in New Zealand, with the Catholic Church condemning it as others found it funny. The controversial billboard, erected by St Matthew-in-the-City Church in Auckland, shows a dejected-looking Joseph under bedcovers beside a sad Mary. Underneath the image, a caption reads: “Poor Joseph. God is a hard act to follow.” The dude just can’ quite match up to the big guy. Church archdeacon Glynn Cardy said the billboard was intended to lampoon the literal interpretation of the Christmas conception story and highlight the real significance of the festival. “What we’re trying to do is to get people to think more about what Christmas is all about,” Cardy told local media. “Is it about a spiritual male God sending down sperm so a child would be born, or is it about the power of love in our midst as seen in Jesus?” The billboard has so far drawn the ire of the Catholic Church in New Zealand, which called it “inappropriate” and “disrespectful.” It was also condemned as offensive by family values group Family First. You knew they were going to have something to say, didn’t you? “The church can have its debate on the Virgin birth and its spiritual significance inside the church building, but to confront children and fhttp://www.stmatthews.org.nz/nav.php?sid=498&id=999amilies with the concept as a street billboard is completely irresponsible and unnecessary,” Family First director Bob McCoskrie told news website stuff.co.nz. Lighten up. I’d drive by it just for chuckle on my way…well, anywhere. Unfortunately the sign was defaced and covered with brown paint several hours after going up by an offended Kiwi. If you want to read more about this controversy here’s the church’s website: http://www.stmatthews.org.nz/nav.php?sid=498&id=999

Discount for Your Grilled Cheese Tattoo

Got a tattoo of a grilled cheese sandwich? If so this is your lucky day. An Ohio restaurant is offering lifetime discounts to people willing to make an indelible display of their love for grilled cheese sandwiches. Melt Bar & Grilled in the Cleveland suburb of Lakewood specializes in spins on the grilled cheese and says anyone with a tattoo of the classic sandwich will get 25 percent off. I wonder if it comes with a pickle? The restaurant has hooked up for the promotion with a tattoo shop, which is offering its own discount on grilled cheese designs. See, even if you don’t have one, it’s still your lucky day. John Forgus of Voodoo Monkey Tattoo says he’s been getting creative, giving one person a tattoo of Popeye holding a grilled cheese sandwich instead of a spinach can. OK, this is officially the strangest business promotion idea I’ve seen. Can I get some cheese and ink please?

Woman Flashing Boobs Struck by Distracted Driver

There’s a certain irony in this story. There’s also bare boobs, drunkeness and mayhem, all the ingredients of the perfect story. Cherelle May Dudfield was struck by a vehicle after she ran out into the road following a dare by friends. Always a smart move. The 18-year-old had been drinking with her mates when the incident happened, and had to be treated in hospital for cuts she suffered. I told, you alcohol. The teenager was also landed with a $240 fine for disorderly behaviour. “I stood on the centre line, flashed a couple of cars with my boobs, got back in and they [her friends] told me to do it again, so I did,” said Dudfield. “And then I saw a car coming towards me, on the middle of the centre lane driving up towards me, so I decided to run. And then I got hit.” See, boobs and mayhem. To demonstrate exactly how silly she had been, she later re-enacted her stunt for a TV station – but this time she was fully sober, and no one crashed. Yea, let’s recreate this, only on video, to see if we can cause another accident. And Dudfield also gave a repeat performance to cows on her farm. Cows on her farm? Why is she flashing cows? Has she been running in the wrong social circles? Was one of her friends that dared her named Elsie? or Bossie? However, police officers did not see the funny side of her exposure, which happened in the small New Zealand town of Invercargill. “This was obviously an alcohol- involved offense,” said Olaf Jensen, of Invercargill Police. “This girl put herself at risk with the actions she undertook, not only herself, but the motorists on the road.” Leave it to these investigative geniuses to get right to the heart of the matter. Hey Olaf, quick thinking there.

Building a Life-size Stagecoach From Toothpicks

When I first saw this, I thought, OK, tiny model made out of toothpicks, let’s check it out. I never dreamed it would be full size. Terry Woodling spent 15 years creating the Wells Fargo replica using wooden sticks and glue. Known as Mr Toothpick, he made models for years but this was his most ambitious project.It cost him more than $1400 but the model was bought for $160,000 by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! “I never kept track of the hours I spent working on it, only the years,” said the 72-year-old from Warsaw, Indiana. Amazing.