Little chunks of my brain

International Twat’s Day

It was International Women’s Day on Saturday and a couple of references to it make my twat-o-meter tingle (does that sound rude? It’s really not rude). The first was at a gig by Glasgow band Chvrches on Saturday night. The band’s singer, Lauren Mayberry (who talked about some of the horrible sexist abuse she gets on social media in the Guardian here) gave a shout out to the day. For some reason a small number of guys in the audience decided to boo this. Luckily Lauren is as able as you’d expect a pop star in opaque tights to be and threatened to go into the audience and kick their cunts in. But seriously, who the fuck is booing International Women’s Day? Are these men who have considered the impact of the event and the on-going need to highlight how women are struggling for equality around the globe and thought “down with that sort of thing” or are they just Neanderthal neds booing the idea of us selfish bints wanting a whole fucking day to ourselves? Hard to tell.

The football club Manchester City decided to mark International Women’s Day by creating a new section on the club website devoted to women. Presumably worried that the content on the non-gendered website was too complex for women, they decided what was needed were recipes, the chance to win One Direction tickets and a column about whether or not tattoos on a woman are attractive. Welcome to 2014: would you rather shag Harry, Zayn or Niall and stick the dinner on, eh love.

Complaining about this on twitter brought me into contact with a man who couldn’t have been more of a bellend if he had a slit in his head that pumped jizz. Apparently it’s not sexist because there are recipes on the main site so men get them too. THE MAIN SITE ISN’T FOR MEN AND WE DON’T NEED SEPARATE RECIPES YOU WANKSTAIN. He had a number of similar points. Every single one of them was a giant, steaming crock of horseshit.

I speak (type. wotevs.) as someone who uses the website of the football team I support on a regular basis to buy tickets, check fixtures, watch interview clips and all manner of non-gendered things. If they were to decide to offer me some gendered content, I’d be telling them to bang it right up their hoop before hiring someone to carry out a DOS attack on them (just floating that idea for any disaffected female Man City fans).

At the risk of doing the sisters down, we’re not special. The whole point of feminism is equality. If your way of showing how equal we are is saying that we need a special way to engage with our football clubs then you’re quite clearly a bunch of bunglecunts who need a dry slap.

I realise these are just little trivial pain in the arse things in comparison to the things that International Women’s Day are meant to highlight but it’s my blog and I’ll moan about what I like. Good day to you.

Not enough use of the word “Cunt” in this blog. I would have loved it, if Lauren had jumped into the crowd at that gig and really did “kick their cunts in”. You don’t blog enough Gail, what’s the matter with you? Get it fucking sorted!