wouldisurviveanuke.com

Disclaimer:

Hey everyone. If the map isnt working, its because I have blown through our Google Maps allowed usage. Google only allows me to use so much
before you have to start paying, and that amount is a lot. I can't afford to drop $10,000 required by Google as a fee to make a Google Maps business account.
Besides, dropping 10k for a joke website would be insanity, even if I had the money. I will spend some time tonight and spin up my own map servers on docker. Terribly sorry.

wouldisurviveanuke.com

Disclaimer:

The website and all information contained on it is intended for entertainment purposes only. This site is not intended to influence you or
anyone else to make decisions regarding the safety of you or of anyone else in the event of a nuclear or any other type of attack.
We shall in no event be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, consequential, or exemplary damages to you or to anyone else
from the use of this information.

Congratulations! You're dead! You finally accomplished something!

Welp, you're dead. That desk you hid under failed miserably to protect you.

You are more dead than Cory Feldman's career, and thats saying something

Sorry, you died. But at least you’re in a better place now: a mass grave at beautiful Happy Valley Cemetery!

Your death is excruciatingly painful, horribly long, and sickening to watch...like Thursday nights on NBC.

Even though you’re dead, you still manage to achieve your lifelong goal: slow decomposition!

You do a pretty good re-enactment of Margaret Hamilton's final scene in The Wizard of Oz, but you overdramatize it a bit.

For once, when you say you're blown away by something, you won't be exaggerating.

Although your death is nearly instantaneous, you still have time to croak out half an expletive. Way to stick it to the man!

As your collection of Star Wars action figures (still NIB!) evaporates (a moment before you do), you realize you do have the most toys! Congratulations on your big win!

Isn’t it nice to know that, for one millisecond, you had really smooth skin?

You experience a good quarter-second of pride in all that time you spent on your bucket list. Then you’re gone.

Look on the bright side: your death has motivated you to finally get off the couch and get to work on that afterlife!

So what if your skin melted off? You'll still look good in a turtle neck.

You have a radiant glow, and it is not because you're pregnant.

The only mutant power you are getting is the power to die a long painful death. Yay for radiation sickness!

You survive your horrific burns, but let's just say that high definition photography will NOT be your friend.

Your wounds provide you with a whole new career: as a model for topographic maps!

Congratulations! Your level of radiation exposure qualifies you for a job as a calibrator for Geiger counters!

Now that you’re highly radioactive, you can't wait to see what happens when you bite a spider!

In the short amount of time it takes you to perish, you finally learn not to pick at your scabs, because picking leads to digging, and the next thing you know, you’ve lost a kneecap.

You end up dying from lung tumors from the fallout. Before you go, you develop a short comedy routine about it: "I'm dying from Lesion Air's Disease. Thank you! I'm here all week, hopefully! Try the morphine!"

The bad news: you're going to die soon. The good news: you can finally get rid of that pumice thing in the bathroom.

Despite encroaching death from third-degree burns, you get to experience a rare sense of community and shared pain: you and the rest of doomed band together and pass the time poking holes in each other.