Jerry Hayes

With Grayling in charge of transport Truss prisons and Bozo upsetting Johnny Foreigner God help us all

18 Dec 2016 at 09:53

If Labour wasn’t so hopelessly out of touch this government would be flat lining in the polls. As a Tory who wants May to do well it saddens me that it has all descended into the beginnings of a shambles. Bozo is a national embarrassment spreading mayhem and derision wherever he is sent. At first the FCO rather warmed to him because of his novelty value. But now they despair. I was having a drink with a former Perm Sec of the Foreign Office last week and asked him how the Office regarded him. His eyes rolled heavenwards, ‘all over the shop….the man is clever but not intelligent.’ But he is still seen as a threat by the paranoiac praetorian guard who seem to be starting more fires than putting them out. But Bozo is not much better. He is so thin skinned. Rolling up to Number 10 and moaning about how he has becoming the butt of ministerial humour borders on the laughable. Boris, old son, you are the ministerial joke. That’s why you were appointed.

And then there is Chris Grayling. Just follow the trail of gastropodous slime from the scene of any political disaster and it will lead to this inadequate personification of toss pottery. It was Grayling who cut back the number of prison officers, who presided the over the highest level of custodial suicides. And now he is in charge of transport. His naked party politicking over breaking promises over the future of TFL railways in outer London even prompted that staunch loyalist, Bob Neil, to call for his resignation as he was ‘unfit for office’. I am sure you will have spotted the Grayling penchant for sensitivity and deftness of touch in his handling of the Southern Railway fiasco. He such sits on his hands when an incompetent train company and a militant trade union are squeezing the life and jobs out of commuters. This is probably the time for May to step in and exert some clout. Preferably before Christmas. And the General Secretary of the RMT’s Dave Spart outburst that he was out to bring down the government and replace capitalism with socialism will sadly fuel the rabid hopes of the bonkers wing of the party who want to smash the trade unions. Have they learned any lessons form Jim Prior who sadly died last week? Of course not. They don’t understand that a non party political trade union movement can be a force for good when you have the likes of Mike Ashley and Philip Green sailing an unregulated ocean of speculation with the skull and cross bones billowing in the wind generated by their workers genuine worries.

Let us not forget Liz Truss. Three words. Spineless and hopeless. Spineless because she failed in her statutory duty to protect the judiciary. Hopeless because she could solve the prison crisis relatively easily. Listen to Michael Gove.

And poor old Jeremy Hunt. A fundamentally decent fellow with the right instincts, but who accepted some pretty dreadful advice during the junior doctors dispute. Well, that seems to have disappeared with his reputation surviving whilst that of the BMA flutters in tatters. Jeremy, old son, stay at home this Christmas. Don’t be caught laying on a beach when the usual disasters at Christmas happen and be ordered home. But be aware that emergency services can’t cope. Ambulance trusts are cutting back at a time when A and E are leaving patients in ambulances for three hours at a time. People are dying because of this.

But all is not lost. I read that Jeremy Corby is re launching in the new year. A veritable Bernie Sanders. Champion of the underdog and scourge of the Westminster elite. And who will spearhead this breaking of the mould of British politics? Step forward Jayne Fisher a former employee of Sinn Fein. and her catchy title? Stakeholder Engagement Manager. Bram Stoker eat your heart out.