I read this other AskMe that basically turned into a 50+ answer pile-on about wearing sneakers with a blazer, and now I'm worried that I too am doing something dreadfully wrong by mixing solid button-up shirts and dark wool trousers with big clompy Doctor Martens oxfords, a red nylon messenger bag and nylon windbreaker. Also, sometimes (okay, lots of times) I have a red bicycle helmet hanging from my bag. Could the hive mind explain exactly how dorky I look, and why? I'm not sure I care to change, but I would at least like to understand my options and their consequences, and make my self-presentation a deliberate choice instead of a clueless accident. [more inside]
posted by d. z. wang
on Dec 4, 2013 -
47 answers

What have you been wrong about, realized it, and it changed your life?
I remember reading Albert Ellis' wonderful self-help book A Guide to Rational Living where he gives a great list of irrational and self-defeating beliefs that people have. Among these beliefs was the importance people placed on other's opinion of them as well the emphasis people placed on being perfectionistic in their own lives. Much of this underlies Cognitive Behavioral Therapy but the effect is even more prevalent than that. We all have had beliefs that have held us back, and I'm curious as to what things you once believed that were holding you back in your personal or professional life. Anything will do. It can be anything from knowing the importance of making good first impressions to the need for keeping oneself physically fit even when one doesn't want to. I'm looking to see whether I share of any of these traits or not. So what are the beliefs that have held you back or others that you know?
posted by RapcityinBlue
on Nov 19, 2013 -
60 answers

I'd like to make a list of commonly known "rules" that people have learned and follow, but are in fact not rules at all, and by following them people are led astray. [more inside]
posted by Balonious Assault
on Sep 7, 2011 -
62 answers

I'm just starting out as an independent network and systems contractor and I think I've agreed to a bad deal. What are my options? [more inside]
posted by anonymous
on May 5, 2009 -
21 answers

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