The thing to remember about forgiveness, is that when you forgive another, you are not condoning what they did, nor are you doing it for the benefit of the other person, it is always for your own benefit, for you own inner peace and at times your own sanity :-)

The way to forgive is to simply deal with the feelings the action left and to let go of them... quite often we as people hold on to negative emotions instead of simply letting them go.. we can't truly forgive until we have let go... feelings, emotions, people.. we have to let them go in order to move on from it and forgive.

A good way of dealing and moving on and letting go... is to write a letter to the person. Write down how they made you feel, how their words or actions made you feel, and say you are letting go and forgiving.. this is setting the intent... you then either burn it (safely of course) or bury it.... now you have set the intent, you in turn have to follow that through by truly letting go, and then forgiving. :-)

Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. ~Voltaire

(07-11-2013 09:17 PM)Icemaiden Wrote: The thing to remember about forgiveness, is that when you forgive another, you are not condoning what they did, nor are you doing it for the benefit of the other person, it is always for your own benefit, for you own inner peace and at times your own sanity :-)

The way to forgive is to simply deal with the feelings the action left and to let go of them... quite often we as people hold on to negative emotions instead of simply letting them go.. we can't truly forgive until we have let go... feelings, emotions, people.. we have to let them go in order to move on from it and forgive.

A good way of dealing and moving on and letting go... is to write a letter to the person. Write down how they made you feel, how their words or actions made you feel, and say you are letting go and forgiving.. this is setting the intent... you then either burn it (safely of course) or bury it.... now you have set the intent, you in turn have to follow that through by truly letting go, and then forgiving. :-)

Actually I did this though sent it to the person carefully. I do not want o forgive them as such as forgive how they are in my head, for my sake as it has been traumatic..I dont want to hold on to the negative,..any more

The idea of burning or burying is the symbolism of letting those feelings go (If that makes sense).... a bit like a funeral of sorts, because you are letting go of something in order to move on, even if that something is just hurt, or anger etc etc :-)

I guess the biggest thing about forgiveness is that it is probably the hardest thing to do....

Another way of helping with the forgiveness process is to do cord cutting, and cut the cords that keep us emotionally attached to others.... I haven't got time now as I am babysitting for a friend in a minute..... and am off out tonight... but tomorrow I will type up a couple of ways of doing it if you want :-)

Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. ~Voltaire

(09-11-2013 10:25 AM)Icemaiden Wrote: The idea of burning or burying is the symbolism of letting those feelings go (If that makes sense).... a bit like a funeral of sorts, because you are letting go of something in order to move on, even if that something is just hurt, or anger etc etc :-)

I guess the biggest thing about forgiveness is that it is probably the hardest thing to do....

Another way of helping with the forgiveness process is to do cord cutting, and cut the cords that keep us emotionally attached to others.... I haven't got time now as I am babysitting for a friend in a minute..... and am off out tonight... but tomorrow I will type up a couple of ways of doing it if you want :-)

Thanks I am getting there it a wrestling match between acceptance and forgiveness and taking my power back and realising Ive had a gift and a lucky escape..trying now to turn around the perspective as opposed to focusing on the shock and the pain

Icemaiden,
Would you mind very much telling me where I can get hold of that book you read E Squared? What you have mentioned on various threads about it is interesting. I have tried looking for it to no avail.
Thanks

(10-11-2013 09:01 PM)Dom Wrote: Icemaiden,
Would you mind very much telling me where I can get hold of that book you read E Squared? What you have mentioned on various threads about it is interesting. I have tried looking for it to no avail.
Thanks

E Squared you can find on Amazon,just type it in.I have the book,it's very interesting.