Thursday, June 4, 2009

"I've been thinking about getting my eyes checked -- for real," he said. "My vision has always been 20-20, and I'm not feeling anything crazy, but I'm going to get it checked out."

Being the helpful chaps we are over here are Fack Youk, we have set up a free and easy eye test that our good buddy David or any other washed up slugger can use. Papi, just print the image below out on an 8 1/2" x 11" sheet of paper, tape it to the wall at eye level, and stand 10 feet away.

I think that he is having a complete power outage, noothing to do with his eyes, he gave us quite a run but I believe it is over for him and the Sox should move on. I also believe it will take some doing for Tito to go along with this because he has a way of sticking with guys way too long

Well, at least you're assuming Ortiz can read. That's not something we can assume with all the Red Sox.

Varitek, yeah, probably, they've made the occasional bastard at Georgia Tech but they don't make idiots. Youkilis went to the University of Cincinnati, which, in the last half-century, has been more Bob Huggins than Sandy Koufax (who went there as an architecture student).

Papelbon went to Mississippi State. So did Will Clark, who's normal by comparison. This is the school that signed Jackie Sherrill as head football coach AFTER he nearly ruined Texas A&M. Not sure where Beckett went, as Baseball-Reference.com (a site you could live without but why would you want to) doesn't specify. Possibly, to borrow a phrase from football great Alex Karras, "the University of Mars."