FICTION (Sorted by title)

The Abandoned Soul
by Daniel Sellers

After spending most of his 20s in a drug and alcohol fueled daze, a young man finally hits rock bottom. Having used up his friends and their good graces, he ends up squatting in an abandoned house.

Forcibly sobering he begins to realize that he is not alone in this abandoned house. Left with one last friend and a mountain of regrets, he must decide if this presence is a guilty conscience, or a malicious hunter.

Alice’s Adventures In Wonderland
by Lewis Carroll

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (commonly shortened to Alice in Wonderland) is an 1865 novel written by English author Charles Lutwidge Dodgson under the pseudonym Lewis Carroll.

It tells the story of a girl named Alice who falls down a rabbit hole into a fantasy world populated by peculiar and anthropomorphic creatures.

The tale is filled with allusions to Dodgson’s friends. The tale plays with logic in ways that have given the story lasting popularity with adults as well as children. It is considered to be one of the most characteristic examples of the “literary nonsense” genre, and its narrative course and structure have been enormously influential,especially in the fantasy genre.

Note that this is the Academic (NON-ILLUSTRATED) Edition of Carroll’s classic work. Most editions are filled with pictures and this is intended for schools and those who wish to study the language structure of the original text.

Bloodletting: A Tale of Revenge
By Andy Rausch

“Relentless… Addictive… The kind of nightmare you don’t want to wake up from.”
—Heywood Gould, screenwriter of Rolling Thunder

He was just an average Joe. But when he finds his family held at gunpoint by merciless thugs, he’s told he must murder a Mafia chieftain if he ever wishes to see his loved ones again. Against all odds, Joe keeps his end of the bargain, but the criminals don’t. Now at his wits end, Joe is pushed beyond his breaking point and forced to exact bloody revenge against those who’ve done him and his family wrong in this powerful and violent novella by author Andy Rausch (Mad World).

Boston Posh
by Wol-vriey

In 2028 AD, the USA is a nation ravaged by hungry dragons and dinosaurs.

In Boston, Massachusetts, private eye Bud Malone is hired to rescue a kidnapped heiress. But nothing is as it seems.

Malone works to unravel a tangled web involving Boston Chinatown, a 200-year-old woman with a 9-year-old body, white humanoid robots, a human-liver-eating psychopath, a golem, a porcelain dragon, and a snake goddess with a crush on him.

There’s also a woman obsessed with chicken sex.

Then Malone meets Posh Lane, a gorgeous call girl who’s desperate to quit her pimp. Romantic sparks ignite between Posh and Malone, but Posh’s past suddenly catches up with her in a BIG way.

To save Posh, Malone agrees to run a quest for Earth’s new rulers, the Forks. The quest: recover ex US president Jefferson Lincoln’s liver for them.

Malone has no idea that agreeing to the Fork’s odd request will send him on the weirdest trip he’s ever been on in his life.

Boston Posh. A total mindf*ck. Reality like you’ve never dared imagine it!

DARKENED – The Vampire Series
by Gary Lee Vincent

Book 1 – Darkened Hills

A tale of gripping psychological horror!

2010 Book of the Year WINNER
– ForeWord Reviews Magazine

When evil descends on a small West Virginia town, who will survive?

Jonathan did not start out his life to become a rambler, it just worked out that way. William was a troubled youth with something to hide. Both were from Melas, a small town tucked away in the West Virginia hills… a town where disappearances are happening more and more frequently.

After the suicide of a wanted serial killer, the townsfolk thought the nightmare was over. But when a centuries-old vampire is discovered they find out the hard way it’s just getting started. Dark secrets can only stay hidden for so long and when the devil comes to collect, there will be hell to pay. Can Jonathan and William find a way to stop the vampire before it’s too late? Find out in Darkened Hills!

Darkened Hills is a gothic vampire novel written in the spirit of Dracula with much more sinister characters and eroticism then the old Victorian classic.

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Book 2 – Darkened Hollows

Deep within the coal mines of Melas, something sinister is just dying to get out!

In the heart-stopping sequel to the award-winning Darkened Hills, Jonathan and William must return to West Virginia to face possible criminal charges stemming from their last visit to the damned town of Melas, where both had narrowly escaped the clutches of a vampire seethe.

And as livestock start mysteriously getting murdered with all of their blood drained, worried farmers are searching for answers – leaving the local Sheriff and his deputy racing against time to learn the cause before a more violent crime is committed.

Meanwhile, a nearby mining accident traps a group of coal miners, forcing a perilous escape through the abandoned Runners Ridge mine.

As the trapped miners soon discover, the dead don’t always stay dead and the horrors that are unleashed is just the beginning of the terror about to fall on the rural community nested within the Darkened Hollows!

Book 3 – Darkened Waters

When the world goes to hell, the chosen must arise!

As Talman Cane orchestrates a flood of epic proportions in this third installment of the Darkened series the towns of Melas and Tarklin are caught completely off guard by the deluge.

Hell-bent on finishing what they started, the evil brothers return to the lunatic asylum to take care of the witnesses and add to the ever-growing army of the undead.

Aided by Lucifer himself and the insane vampire demon Legion, the stage is set to channel all of the forces of hell to come forth through the obelisk.

In an all-out race to survive, Jonathan, William, and Amanda soon discover they are up against impossible odds as Lucifer opens the Gateway to Hell, ushering in the zombie apocalypse and the End Times.

Find out who will survive this cosmic battle of the ages in Darkened Waters!

Book 4 – Darkened Souls

Melas and the Madison House are about to be rebuilt. True evil is about to be reborn!

The supernatural events played out at the end of Darkened Waters affected those who survived in unexpected and tragic ways that no one could have predicted.

Young ex-priest and vampire-killer William is drawn back to the West Virginian town that almost killed him, where his vampire arch-enemy Victor Rothenstein still stalks the earth.

The town of Melas lies destroyed after the battle of the End of Days. But why is wealthy Jackie Nixon so eager to rebuild it using the bone dust of murdered souls?

Terrible evil has visited before, but the Gateway to Hell is about to be reopened in a horrific climax. And this time – it’s personal.

Dealey Plaza
by John Russo

From legendary horror and suspense writer JOHN RUSSO comes a harrowing tale where no one is safe!

Dealey Plaza is one of the most notorious places in America, and when youthful conspiracy buffs go there in 1964 to stage their own reenactment of the Kennedy Assassination, four of them are brutally murdered — the first victims of a hate-filled legacy that continues for four more decades.

The survivors of that long-ago Dallas trip, each of them now icons of the American way of life, are about to be honored — or killed.

Who will live and who will die? Will it be country-western star Lori McCoy? Her loving husband? Her scheming ex-husband? Or the case-hardened FBI agent and longtime friend who risks his life trying to protect them?

Elvis Presley, CIA Assassin
by Andy Rausch

In 1970, singer Elvis Presley secretly met with President Richard Nixon. This new comedic novel imagines that Presley became a Central Intelligence Agency operative, eventually moving up through the ranks to become a skilled assassin.

Presented in an oral history fashion, the book tells us about Presley’s secret transformation by the people who knew him best.

Did he fake his death in 1977? Was Presley involved with the Watergate scandal? The Iran hostage crisis? Communicating with aliens?

Read this book to find out the answers to these and many more questions.

The Fall of Tomorrow
by David J. Fairhead

Hopelessness… How do you protect your loved ones when Hell itself opens its insidious mouth?

Horror… Nightmarish Creatures invade your world and there is nowhere to hide.

Blood… How long can you hold out before they come for you?

Pain… Where do you run to avoid being eaten alive by monsters with a voracious appetite for your flesh?

Screams… While you selfishly run for your own life.

Questions… Who is to blame? Where did they come from? How many people survived…and how does the human race find the means to fight back?

THE FALL OF TOMORROW is man’s last tale of desperation told by those that are striving to salvage some hope against a ravenous bastion of evil beasts bent on ruling our world.

The Filing Cabinet of Doom: 17 Bizarro Short Stories by Madeleine Swann

What is THE FILING CABINET OF DOOM?

It’s a surreal comedy set in a black and white world where people communicate via speech bubbles and no sound exists. During a visit by a traveling carnival a psychic informs a village that the world will end soon. Three people make their way to the Head Office of the Council – a distant and dangerous place – to find out what’s going on while the psychic stays behind to face the wrath of the villagers.

In addition to the novella bearing the collection’s title, this book is JAM PACKED with sixteen BONUS short stories of the bizarre for your perusal, including:

Amongst the Dust and the Mice
Care For a Dance?
Dimension Lake
Feathers and Fame
Girl in the Picture
I Can See You
Invite Ghosts and Earn Pounds
My Own Real Doll
One Phone Call Away
Son, I’m Afraid I’m a Zombie
The Annual Essex Medical Convention
The Blue Seashell
The Marzipan King is a Dick
The Problem Rock
Time Tastic Tours
We Interrupt With This Message

Flamingos in the Ashtray: 25 Bizarro Short Stories
by Zoltán Komor

Surreal. Savage. And cinematic. Flamingos in the Ashtray is the collection of some truly weird stories by Zoltán Komor, a young Hungarian author, who lately began to translate his works into English and has published them in several literary magazines.
Discover a world, where everything is possible:

A young man while sipping his tea in the morning, finds a small, two inch long naked female corpse on the bottom of the cup, becomes a killer suspect, and later a judge reads out his verdict from the tea leaves.

A girl gets raped by a hunter, and later gives birth to a wounded deer with bullets in its body that she then has to protect from her hungry parents.

A boy’s head turns into microphone, so when his girlfriend whispers her secrets into his ear, her words echoes through the city.

In this strange world, an old veteran discovers tiny enemy soldiers in the sugar bowl, and the dentist has a small garden where he plants the pulled out teeth like they were seeds and plastic horses grown from them, which he can sell for funfairs. (The only problem is, when children ride these painted steeds, their small teeth begin to rot with every round.)

Strange events take place in the author’s homeland too, where evil horses from the sky terrorizes the people of a small Hungarian village, and an old witch turns into a pork on a pig slaughter after putting the dead animal’s teeth into her mouth.

Moving to foreign lands, some weird western pushes the book slightly into dark pulp territory. Meet Necrosheriff, the decaying corpse, shooting scavenger beetles from his gun; an old phonograph regurgitates burial-music, as he rides into the sunset – girls begin to shake from pleasure from seeing the never wilting cadaveric rigidness. Or meet the fat Chickenbone Mary, who decides to build herself a husband from chicken bones.

And also, there’s the shoeshine boy from the title giving story, who tries to make a living by stealing his clients feet in a mad, dystopian city, where poor people are fed by a helicopter with the dead animals from the zoo, the strippers are so despaired, that they even take of their flesh and the devil rides a bus with electric chairs.

So take a seat. Otherwise you are blocking the drivers view.

The Hags of Black County
by Michelle Bowser

Ruled by a committee of Hags, and fueled by toothless rivalries, Black County lurks just far enough out of the way to be completely unnoticed by the rest of civilization. Its inhabitants have been mentally warped for generations and the land itself seems to have the power to drive anyone unlucky enough to visit into ridiculous hillbilly madness.

When a construction company needs to bury a pipeline through its ludicrous hills and valleys, a twisted charm goes to work and every aspect of already bizarre Black County life takes a gory turn for the hysterical. Take a preposterous trip along with its citizens, both native and new, through escapades such as the Hag parade, the grand opening of Madame Skunk’s House of Ill Repute, the demolition derby riot and the rabid, zombie clown apocalypse.

Hellhole West Virginia
by Rich Bottles Jr.

From the heights of Mothman’s perch high atop the Silver Bridge in Point Pleasant to the depths of Hellhole Cavern in Pendleton County, evil lurks within the shadows as the sun sets upon the haunted hills and hollows of West Virginia.

Lumberjacked
by Rich Bottles Jr.

If you are easily offended or do not possess a truly depraved sense of humor, this story may not be the light summer reading fare you desire.

As for the four feisty female freshmen stranded on top of West Virginia’s third highest mountain, they have no choice but to experience the sick, twisted debauchery and perverted mayhem described deep inside the tight unbroken bindings of this horrific missive.

Lumberjacked takes the reader to a nightmarish world where character development and aesthetic integrity are prematurely cut short by the swinging axes of maniacal lumberjacks, who are hell bent on death and destruction in the remote forests of Appalachia.

And at the climax, when paranoia crosses over to the paranormal, Lumberjacked makes Deliverance look like a family raft trip down the Lower Gauley.

Mad World
By Andy Rausch

“Mad World is dark, twisted, no-holds-barred fun.”
—Jason Starr, author of Bust, Slide, and The Max

Everyone’s playing an angle in the City of Angels.

Mad World tells the stories of a black hitman who doubles as a university professor, a Catholic priest who longs to be a gangster, a would-be author from Kansas, a gay phone sex operator who claims he’s straight, a group of rich twentysomethings playing a deadly game of life and death, a vicious Mafia boss, and a sleazy Hollywood movie director. As each of their stories intersect, the body count piles up and the action comes nonstop in this tense, white-knuckle thriller by first-time author Andy Rausch.

“A wild ride. If you like it gangster, Mad World delivers.”
—Daniel Birch, author of Get Some

PUBLISHER’S NOTE: This book was previously published under the title “The Suicide Game.”

The Manacled
by Rich Bottles Jr.

What happens when twin brothers lease out the former West Virginia State Penitentiary with the false purpose of filming a documentary on supernatural phenomena, but their true intention is to make a pornographic movie?

Chaos ensues as the disturbed spirits of murdered convicts, along with the reanimated dead from the neighboring Indian Burial Mound, take their vengeance on the unwary and undressed trespassers.

Minor Confessions of an Angel Falling Upward is all of these… and more. Set in modern times and spiraling back to the swirl of Pre-Creation, this postmodern blend of genre-bending pop-prose and socio-political commentary is a classic tale of the (anti-)hero’s quest for Reason and Redemption in a Universe gone mad.

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Who is Planner Forthright?

A fallen angel made Man. A once-winged evil with un-Divine purpose on this Plane. A cannibal prince chosen to inherit a castled landscape of destruction and despair. An Alchemist of sorts—a mental magician; a mortar-and-pestle wizard converting carbon lies to golden Truth, whose language is his own. A Vampire by nature and condition whose been walking the waters and thorny highways of our planet for over 40 years.

– And he’s seeking a way out…

Passageway
by Gary Lee Vincent

With illustrations by Andy Hopp

When an archeological dig goes horribly wrong, the team is trapped in an alternate world where evil awaits them at every turn. Find out who will survive the Passageway!

From the author of supernatural vampire thriller “Darkened Hills” comes an unforgettable tale that spans four continents and takes the reader to the very realm of Hell itself.

Skeleton warriors, zombies, other undead beings and werewolves are all very real inside the Passageway! In this Bizarro-genre tribute to H.P. Lovecraft and Indiana Jones, this deadly tale will keep you guessing and leave you breathless to the end!

The Twelve Steps
by Zachary Crabtree

“A Man who Cannot Keep Awake Cannot Keep it Together.”

There is always something that pulls an alcoholic deeper into his unquenchable thirst – something degenerative to the human spirit. Indeed, there have been incidents in my life that carry tragic significance to me, yet I know they pale in comparison to the tragedies experienced by others.

When the jagged pieces of a disfigured past become a troubled, broken-up, glass-bottled mosaic in one’s present life, all the innocent souls affected along the way become entangled in one’s conscience; while the depression, pills, manic behavior and soul-searching coalesce in a series of twelve steps.

Vegan Vampire Vaginas
By Wol-vriey

From the man who brought you VEGAN ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE and BOSTON POSH, comes…
VEGAN VAMPIRE VAGINAS

The biggest bank heist in US history. And Tom Palmer can’t remember pulling it off. And no, this isn’t your standard case of amnesia.

After a one-night-stand gone horribly wrong, Boston salesman Tom Palmer wakes up with a vagina implanted in his left hand.

Then his day gets worse:

Tom is transported across space-time to a nightmare version of Boston, one where the Bizarro virus has transformed half the population into cannibals.

Worst of all, Tom discovers that in this new Boston, he’s the infamous gangster Pussypalm, wanted for robbing the Federal Reserve Bank of Boston a year ago.

He also learns that the vagina in his hand is prophetic, i.e. it talks . . . after sex.

With 130 people left dead during his bank heist and six billion dollars missing, Tom knows he’s living on borrowed time. It is in his best interests not to remember anything. Because once he does . . .

But then everything gets so much odder. Tom begins remembering what has to be someone else’s life. Or is it?

Vegan Vampire Vaginas: A mind-bending trip through Bizarro America!

Vegan Zombie Apocalypse
by Wol-vriey

In the post-apocalypse worlderness, zombies rule the earth. They’re allergic to meat, and brains literally make them explode.

The necros, barbaric human nomads travelling the worlderness in floating villages, worship the zombies. The necros both eat the zombies, and wear clothes made from them; they live in houses built of bricks of undead flesh. They also keep zombies as sex slaves.

Two fugitives meet in the ancient ruins of Texas. The first is Soil 15-f, a womancow who’s escaped her farm a week before she’s due to be killed and her blood potato crop harvested. The second fugitive is Able Kane, former head necros food technician, now sentenced to death for heresy.

But Soil is no ordinary humancow. Unknown to herself, she’s the vegan zombie agricultural revolution, and the zombies desperately want her back. And the necros equally desperately want Able Kane dead. He’s fled with a forbidden discovery which will reshape the world for the worse if used. And Able is just hardheaded/misguided enough to use it.

With android zombinators and the head necros assassin (Able’s ex-girlfriend Morphia) after them, Soil and Able Kane have no choice but to climb the lemon tree to Haeven, residence of the zombie god Necro. And by anyone’s reckoning, Soil and Able Kane are the two people in the worlderness who should never have been let into Heaven.

Vulgarity for the Masses
by J.S. Lawhead

A whole history of madness and struggle lie ahead for the disfigured children of Adam in this collection of nine tales from J.S. Lawhead.

Stories include:

The Whale Story – Well-intentioned, apocalyptic adventurer Meteo Xavier seeks the rare Blue Whale and ends up fighting for his life in a litigious, courtroom battle that threatens to annihilate the human condition as we know it.

On a Sunday Afternoon, This Happened – A crack-addicted, alcoholic, pothead on the rag tries to rob two banks on Sunday and defies the gods, the universe, the laws of nature regarding drug use and teleportation, a rival crook, and a large guardian sphincter on his quest to repay a drug debt to a holiday icon.

Aurora Terminus – A horrible tragedy marks the symbolic end of the British Empire for two aristocratic men (animals, actually) as their friend is betrayed and murdered by Lady Britannia herself; forcing the two to take revenge for whats left of their country’s dignity and the pride of being British. (Inspired by Genesis’ Selling England By the Pound)

The Wisdom of My Father – A first person memoir of the narrator’s father and the usual father-son adventures through life that all of us go through – like getting gang-raped in Atlanta, building a guitar out of a fish, taking the heat for a Mexican drug deal gone bad and exploding your bowels on live TV.

The White Screamer (Three Incidents) – Across the generations in Tennessee, an unfathomable evil grows stronger as it absorbs innocent men and women in an eternal, soulthirsty mission to cleanse the lands and history from the white man’s influence.

The Book of the Three Little Pigs (Bible Version) – Exactly what it says it is.

HOPEBLISS – A two-headed boy meets a woman with no head (and unprovoked antagonism against Jesus for some reason) and offers to exchange heads with her so she can go about her life, but the results become disastrous and incomprehensible.

Ouroborus– A bizarre, ancient phenomenon grips the mountains of Tennessee and slowly wraps two students from a secluded academy into a spiraling conspiracy to keep the world hidden from God’s influence and lock the human condition into a cold world of icy logic.

The Feast of 1000 Famines – Meteo Xavier returns to bookend the book for a date, a charity event and an assassination/vengeance plot all gone horribly wrong. Book ends on a relatively positive note, readers are satisfied, they recommend it to their friends, and life continues on as it should until the sun swallows the planet whole and everything we have lived and died for vanishes in a layer of chromosphere.

Westward Hoes
Edited by Rich Bottles Jr. & Gary Lee Vincent

Daring… Dueling… Disturbing… Damning

WANTED: Bizarro writers to provide their take on “How the West was Weird.”

Nine outlaw writers rode into town from obscurity to pen nine tantalizing tales of horror and fantasy, and leaving once they branded their own personal marks on the weird western genre and became living legends of the American Frontier experience.

Like drunken Indian scouts, the writers fervidly tracked down and captured the Western genre, tore off its fashionable veneer and ravished its exposed essence.

So belly up to the bar with your favorite soiled dove and enjoy perusing these thrilling tales of Old West debauchery, danger and desire; compiled by the publisher of The Big Book of Bizarro and featuring the bizarro novella Big Trouble in Little Ass by Wol-vriey.

Stories include:

Demoneye by David J. Fairhead – A vengeful loner finds the courage to battle evil, but only after a few stiff drinks.

The Undesirable by Jessie J. Saxon – When a series of unsolved murders occurs, a small town sheriff discovers that he can’t just abandon his duty and run away from his problems.

The Tailsman by Gary Lee Vincent – A ladies’ man uses his unique charms to tame a wild beast and become a living legend.

The Man With Too Many Names by Kelly R. Martin – The more sinners that a holy man eliminates, the more heathens he seems to attract.

Just Enough Rope by Nelson W. Pyles – A bounty hunter must decide between claiming his bounty or hanging up his holster on the bed post of a bountiful beauty.

The Whore in the Mirror by Kimberly Bennett- A man tracks down his missing brother, straight into the deceitful arms of a narcissistic ne’er-do-well.