The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

When one sits on the john for some amount of time before realizing they cannot release their fecal matter. The cause is sometimes constipation. However this is not always the case; the cause may be unknown. It is not uncommon for one to release gas during this period of time. Time elapsed before the epiphany varies greatly, experts suggest times from 1 minute all the way to a rare case in Japan in which the subject took over 27 hours (exact time is unknown). The mean is 11 minutes. The standard deviation, or σ, is approximately 7 minutes. Time does vary between species and sex.

(Whilst watching a football game)
John: Brb, I gotta take a dump. *10 minutes later*
Henry: Dude wtf are you doing? You just missed Janet Jackson's boob!
John: Damn I can't shit!
Henry: Oh man, you must have a case of Faux Defecation

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Also known as suggestion loop:
When one types in random letters, words and/or phrases into the Google search bar just to see what Google's suggestions are. Although it may provide many laughs its side effects are dangerous as this may lead to a lack of productivity and in some rare but serious cases a major loss of time.

Ronnie: I went to search how to change a light bulb... six hours later I was looking at how to change a light ballast
Pauly: Wtf is a light ballast???
Ronnie: I dunno but I still don't know how to change the light bulb in my tanning bed
Mike: Oh no, we have a situation!
Snooki: Waaaaahhhh
Vinny: Looks like you were suggestion surfing......