My Foray Into Return of Kings

Monday, January 27, 2014

There's this awful website that was created a couple months ago for men who take "the red pill." If this concept is foreign to you, you're extremely lucky. It's not something I spend a lot of time thinking about, mostly because it makes my blood boil. The men on Return of Kings write such thoughtful articles as, "Why You Should Date a Woman with an Eating Disorder" (one reason is because she's vulnerable, another reason because "crazy chicks" are amazing at sex), "How Women Train Men to Rape" (yes you read that correctly) and "When Her No Means Yes." There are other articles on there about other stupid things like how women with short hair are damaged, that women over 30 who are unmarried are "damaged goods," etc. The latter are just opinion pieces that haven't been thought out--I mean if you really think women with short hair are damaged, do your thing bro. But what I take issue with is that this website is actually condoning violence against women--and in a very narrow-minded and ridiculous way. There is no thought process here--it's all "Man Good and Deserving--Woman Stupid and Man's Possession."

Return of Kings has several core beliefs listed on their website. Here they are, lifted directly from their site on the day this was published:

ROK Community Beliefs:

1. Men and women are genetically different, both physically and
mentally. Sex roles evolved in all mammals. Humans are not exempt.2. Women are sluts if they sleep around, but men are not. This fact is due to the biological differences between men and women.3. Men will opt out of monogamy and reproduction if there are no incentives to engage in them.4. Past traditions and rituals that evolved alongside humanity served a net benefit to the family unit.5. Testosterone is the biological cause for masculinity.
Environmental changes that reduce the hormone’s concentration in men
will cause them to be weaker and more feminine.6. A woman’s value is mainly determined by her fertility and beauty. A
man’s value is mainly determined by his resources, intellect, and
character.7. Elimination of traditional gender roles and the promotion of
unlimited mating choice in women unleashes their promiscuity and other
negative behaviors that block family formation.8. Socialism, feminism, and cultural Marxism cause societies to
decline because they destroy the family unit, decrease the fertility
rate, and require large entitlements that impoverish the state.

Somehow, a declining fertility rate is going to impoverish the state....even though overpopulation is a growing problem. But of course, that is just one flaw in their "logic."

While we all know this is awful, this blog entry is about the time I spent in the company of such lovely "men." First and foremost, yes I am a feminist. Secondly, I am straight. Thirdly, neither of these things means I hate men. I dislike specific men for their actions, but similarly I dislike specific women for their actions.

At any rate, I engaged with them over the topic of how many times women say no to men when they mean yes. I asserted that I have never said no when I meant yes, but this was met with "Of course, all women will say that on the Internet. In real life, women do this all the time. This is part of the courting process." Really? I mean, I did go to an all-girls school and I admit that totally delayed my ability to date like an adult for a while, but I don't think I'm that far behind. If I say no, I mean no. If I say yes, I mean yes. It's really not rocket science.

I was then told that my assertion that I don't say no when I mean yes means I am either lying or ugly and men are not interested in sleeping with me in the first place. Well, I know I'm not lying and ugliness is subjective--but this is a flawed logic by someone who has absolutely no idea what I look like. I was told if I wasn't ugly and fat, then I was the only non-ugly, not-fat woman to not do these things. Experience will tell me otherwise, but here's a charming response:

"The girls posting here all seem to think they are actually attractive
enough that somebody would wanna $%&$ them in the first place.

Girls, dont worry. With your looks, plus the fact - that you have to post snark here on RoK...You have nothing to worry about."

Yeah sounds about right.

One of the things that disturbed me about this article is that persistence gets you what you want. Firstly, that reeks of entitlement. If you bother a woman enough, she will sleep with you, evidently--according to this logic. Honestly, in my dating experience, a man's persistence after I have said no is usually grating and totally annoying and makes it even less likely that I will want to date him. Perhaps I will say no initially and change my mind over time if he respects me, but dogged persistence comes off as desperation--especially in the realm of one night stands (which is evidently what this article is discussing). If I say no to going home in a cab to your place, etc. and you keep pressuring me, that tells me you think you have a right to sleep with me, which is totally appalling. According to Return of Kings, men do have that right.

Another silly point this site often makes is insinuating that non-thin, non-beautiful women have no purpose in life since most men don't find them attractive. Despite the obvious idiocy of this, they are ignoring the fact that there are men (maybe not most, but a significant number) that do enjoy larger women. That is completely negating their taste and making it so men are only allowed to pursue women of a certain mold, which in turn, is damaging to men who feel they cannot seek out and be attracted to the women they are really attracted to. When I brought this up in the comments, I was told I was likely ugly. Thanks for that thought provoking response, mate!

The last concept that bothered me about this is that in some of the comments, it was stated that a woman should not go to a man's house alone if she doesn't intend on sleeping with him. As someone who has many male friends (all of whom I trust not to rape me), this is absolutely ridiculous. It's as though they are stating that women owe men something. In turn, they are stereotyping themselves, saying that men are so primal that they cannot control their own urges. Not only do they deserve sex, but they cannot hold back. I find that insulting to men as well as women.

What have I learned from Return of Kings? Mostly that I am fat and ugly (according to my opinions, not by what I actually look like), that men all think only one type of woman is attractive, men deserve sex even if a woman doesn't want to engage in it and men are unable to hold back their urges.

Super.

Thankfully they appear to be a fringe group, and I'm halfway convinced a lot of this is just to garner more views to their blog, aka more money for their "cause."

My name is Anna and I'm an author, blogger, historian and American living in the United Kingdom. I have taken a bit of a hiatus from my blogging and writing, but I am happy to be back on track and doing what I love again.