Did you hear about the guy who drove to the beer store with his toddler child in the back seat? He went into store and bought a case of beer,went out to his car forgetting the child was in back seat. Opened the door and threw the case of beer into the back seat and it landed right on the child!!!!

Child is fine...it was light beer!!

Tell me to stop any time..everybody here does!! Lol

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that there is a damn cricket! as a Boston fan I would have thought you would know all about crickets, that's all you can hear during most Bruins games.

Sorry but that's a grasshopper or a locus...just saying..I passed this pic around the job site and everybody said...grasshopper!!! Crickets are brown and don't have heads like that. I wish I could post pics.

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We've got tons of both of these where I live. It sounds like a fairy land at night with their music. When I was little, I put a cricket in my easy bake oven...I still feel bad about that lol! (And no, I wasn't baking any cakes in that thing after that)

We've got tons of both of these where I live. It sounds like a fairy land at night with their music. When I was little, I put a cricket in my easy bake oven...I still feel bad about that lol! (And no, I wasn't baking any cakes in that thing after that)

And that may be a viola and not a violin but I won't argue that one...I would have to either see the size or just look at the bow.

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We've got tons of both of these where I live. It sounds like a fairy land at night with their music. When I was little, I put a cricket in my easy bake oven...I still feel bad about that lol! (And no, I wasn't baking any cakes in that thing after that)

Originally Posted by Orrscores

Sorry but that's a grasshopper or a locus...just saying..I passed this pic around the job site and everybody said...grasshopper!!! Crickets are brown and don't have heads like that. I wish I could post pics.

First off you 2 need to lay off whatever it is you are smoking down south because it's just not working for you!!!

That there is a bloody cricket! To be more precise the great green bush-cricket or tettigonia viridissima. The adult males grow up to 28–36 millimetres (1.1–1.4 in) long, while females reach 32–42 millimetres (1.3–1.7 in). This insect is most often completely green (but there are specimens completely yellowish or with yellow legs), excluding a rust-colored band on top of the body. Tettigonia viridissima is distinguished by its very long and thin antennae, which can sometimes reach up to three times the length of the body, thus differentiating them from grasshopperss, which always carry short antennae. It could be confused with Tettigonia cantans, whose wings are a centimeter shorter than the ovipositor, or Tettigonia caudata whose hind femurs bear conspicuous black spines.

Four friends, a doctor of medicine, a car salesman, a minister and a Boom Beach programmer decided to play a round of golf. The doctor offered to drive, so they all got into his car. While going down the road, the car suddenly slowed, they heard thumping noises, and the car started to lean to the front right. The doctor pulled off the road, turned the car off and said: "I deal with injured people, not machines. What do we do?"

The car salesman spoke first: "The problem is that this vehicle is two years old. The newer models don't have this problem. Let us simply walk to the dealership and get you a new car."

"That is not the problem, nor the solution" said the minister. "This vehicle is obviously possessed by a demon spirit. I shall exorcise it!"

The Boom Beach programmer chuckled then said "Gentlemen, what we have is simply a flat tire in the front right. I will take care of it for you". He then stepped out of the car.

Fifteen minutes later, he got back in the car and said "Problem resolved, let us get going". The doctor started the car, gunned the engine, but the car barely moved and the thumping was much louder. They all looked at the programmer and yelled "What the heck did you do?" The programmer replied "It should have worked. Since we had a bug in the left front tire, I simply flattened the left rear tire to achieve the proper balance."