How Long Can Lucas Keep Up the “Wha-booms”?

Now that we have all had the chance to catch Monday’s season premiere of the Bachelorette, we can finally address the biggest issue so far.

Of course, I am talking about ABC’s choice to include the world’s most ridiculous man among the men vying for Rachel’s heart. Quite obviously, Lucas “Wha-boom” Yancey, who chose to make his first impression by showing up in a t-shirt emblazoned with his catch-phrase, was cast to make headlines, add humor, and stir-up some drama in the house.

Unfortunately, Lucas (I prefer to call him by his birth-name), is neither charming, nor funny, and Rachel’s decision to award him a rose reminds viewers that this show is very much scripted. Not unlike WWE, The Bachelor is a show that we all know is fake, but we appreciate the maintained illusion.

While other respectable suitors were denied screen time and ultimately a rose, we had to watch Lucas turn himself red in the face THREE SEPARATE TIMES. I’m sure the only people who thought his performance was funny were his exes who relished in second-hand embarrassment.

ABC’s choice to cast Lucas feels desperate. We’d all love to see another Chad, Corrine, or Lace shake things up and keep it interesting. But on behalf of Bachelor Nation, we deserve better than a catch-phrase and a stupid t-shirt—don’t insult us.

Did I mention Lucas’ occupation? Mixed in with a US Marine veteran, an emergency medicine physician, a chiropractor and a few attorneys, Lucas’ job title is “wha-boom.” Which brings up my next concern.

SFGate

Do the producers of The Bachelor franchise know what “occupation” means? “Wha-boom” is not an occupation much less a word in the English language. While we’re at it, “aspiring drummer, “dog lover,” “chicken enthusiast,” and “tickle monster,” are also not occupations. In fact, it’s almost insulting that the network isn’t impressed by whatever jobs the contestants actually have. “Funemployed,” would be much more acceptable, or if they dared be honest, “aspiring actor.”

That’s exactly what Lucas’ title would read if he wasn’t occupied by “wha-boom.” His IMDB page cites an impressive body of work ranging from several Dorito’s commercials to a Spanish game show on Telemundo called 12 Corazones Especial de Circo Entretenimiento. Lucas has even searched for love on WeTv’s Ex Isle alongside his Bachelorette nemesis, Blake Elarbee, the second most annoying contestant this season. The two have a rivalry that predates their time on The Bachelorette, involving relationship drama that no one cares about. Point is, Blake isn’t just going after Lucas for coming onto the show “for the wrong reasons,” which in a way, is quite refreshing.

History tells us that producers will keep these clowns on the show for far too long, so we can only hope for better, more realistic drama to outshine their nonsense. In the meantime, maybe we will see more from Lucas, like an episode without “wha-boom,” or perhaps he can take a page out of Bryan’s book and charm Rachel with the Spanish he learned at Telemundo.