How to find out what your partner's love language is before Valentine's Day.

Valentine’s Day can be a time of stress for a lot of couples. There are gifts to buy, restaurant’s and rooms to book and flowers to send. Knowing the love language of your partner can certainly increase your chances of a good time together this Valentine’s Day and it will also give you a clearer insight into what you need and expect from your partner as well. According to long time relationship counsellor and author, Gary Chapman there are 5 love languages. So, what are they?

Words of Affirmation

If your partner hands out words of affirmation to you this Valentine’s Day that might be his or her love language. Look out for words of encouragement and compliments, like “You look incredibly beautiful in that dress tonight.” Or even something simple like “I really love that you’re always up for a night out with me.” Unless your partner knows your love language and is trying to speak to you in it, then they’ll most likely use their own love language to communicate their feelings to you.

Quality Time

Quality time as a love language, isn’t just going on a date night and spending time with you. Hopefully this is something you do already as a couple. Quality time as a love language is your partner giving you’re their undivided attention. If your partner shows their love by turning off the tv and phone and talking to you, giving you every bit of attention, then quality time is likely their love language. Try and give them your quality time this Valentine’s Day to show them how much you care.

Receiving Gifts

On the outside, this love language can seem a little superficial but it’s anything but. Giving gifts to your partner shows them you were thinking of them when you weren’t together. You must be thinking of someone to give them a gift and this is what your partner is trying to tell you and show you when they do. This isn’t the same as giving a gift on Valentine’s Day itself, as that can be expected. But if you often receive little gifts and tokens of affection from your partner when you’re not expecting it, then your partner’s love language might be receiving gifts. Try and return the love this Valentine’s Day by giving them a gift they’re not expecting. Better yet, make them a Valentine’s gift yourself, to show them how long they were in your thoughts.

Acts of Service

In a healthy relationship both partner’s should be doing acts of service on a regular basis, however acts of service as a love language can often go beyond this. Acts of service are different in every relationship because it’s based on what your partner wants you to do. If your partner makes sure that dinner is on the table when you get home from work because they know you like to eat straight away or if they pick up a prescription you need because they know you’re too busy then your partner’s love language might be Acts of Service. Do something this Valentine’s Day that you normally wouldn’t, like cleaning the house, cooking a fancy meal or watching the kids so your partner can relax.

Physical Touch

Physical touch is of course a way of communicating emotional love, but we’re not just talking about sex. Holding hands, stroking hair, kissing and hugging can all be signs of love. For some, physical touch is their primary love language and without it they can feel unloved in return. If your partner’s main love language is physical touch, consider giving them a romantic massage or snuggle up and watch a movie together this Valentine’s Day.