Interpersonal Communication

Key Things You Should Know About Interpersonal Communication!!!

Interpersonal Communication is Transactional and therefore both the speaker and listener are sending and receiving messages at the same time. This makes it impossible to determine who is speaking and who is listening as both kiddos are actively participating in the conversation.

Communication via Multiple Channels. Messages are either seen (eyes) or heard (ears). However, ALL Senses are used during the communication process. A high five, secret handshake or friendship necklace all provide a form of communication. That means that several messages are being communicated at the same time. For example, a friend may tell you that she is upset at you for not talking to her on the playground, but the secret handshake and friendship necklace around her neck let you know that you are still loved.

People Create Meaning and many factors impact them. For example, Bobby may say, "Can I have just one more turn with the controller?" If Bobby asked this the first time, then Suzie might just think that he wants a little more time with Minecraft. Yet, if Bobby has asked this 5 times already, then the message might be that he will never have enough time and really does not want to share evenly.

There is a LOT of great research out there regarding the importance of interpersonal communication within schools. One of my favorite research articles can be located here. The article, 'School Leadership, Interpersonal Communication, Teacher Satisfaction, and Student Achievement, by Victor A. Skrapits, Fordham University provides a detailed look at the role of interpersonal communication in schools. Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy as you are sure to learn many great tips!

There are many Environments and Noises in Communication.

Physical Noise involves sounds in the background, such as music, sporting event noise, teachers talking, parents laughing, siblings crying and much and much more can impact communication. Make sure you are talking to your child in a appropriate setting. You may not want there to be too many noises or distractions in the background. This can be extremely important to note if your child has distraction issues, ADHD, or other attention issues. However, your child might do best with a little bit of background noise. Try having some soft music playing in the background. Get creative and play around with different options. Everybody responds differently and your child will too!!!

​Physiological Noise relates to the impact coming from inside such as an upset stomach, headache, hearing loss and anything else going inside your body. You probably know your child the best. If he/she is exhausted after school and needs some down time or has to run of some steam, then do not choose that time for a serious conversation. In addition, it is important to listen to your child. If he/she is not feeling well, is tired, cranky, etc, then you might need to shoot for a different time to chat. At the very least, you will need to take into consideration these physiological elements and how they are going to impact the responses and tone of the conversation.

Psychological Noise involves the notion that you have about something or someone prior to engaging. For example, if your child thinks that you are going to immediately start yelling at them, then they might be much more likely to put a guard when you approach them for conversation. Be aware of the psychological and emotional stock that is built with your children. This is crtical for interpersonal communication!

Interpersonal Communication Can Never Be Taken Back!Parents, please remember that you can never pull back messages that were conveyed. You may and should apologize. You can change your message. You may even just not follow through with what you said (we have all been there). However, those messages can never fully be taken back. Your kiddo heard them, and they are apart of the interpersonal communication process. Be mindful of your statements, and how they might be received. If you are very upset or emotional about something, you might want to take a moment to collect your thoughts and think about what message you would like to have convey to your child. Words make a very strong impact!!!!

Perspective & Perception

Perspective: Each person brings his/her own ideas, past experiences, home life, cultures, interests, etc to the conversation. This will impact how you observe and perceive things. You can view it as the lens for which you filter information through.

Perception: Your ability to select, organize, understand all of the information from a particular situation.

Keep in mind the elements of perspective and perception of both yourself and audience member (child, friend, teacher, etc). Try to put yourself in their shoes and understand how he/she might be perceiving the information. People can look at the same situation, and their perspective and perception can provide a totally different response. This is a fundamental element to mindful of during Interpersonal Communication.