'Why I masturbated in labour - and 3 reasons you should consider it, too!'

Kidspot Editor |
February 29, 2016

Most women would say it's the LAST thing on their mind. But for doula and birth photographer Angela Gallo, masturbating in labour was a very different story.

This article originally appeared on Angella Galloand has been republished here with permission. Image: Lacey Barratt Photography

"Shut the front door - she said WHAT?!" Yes, you heard me right. And don't be so shocked. Birth and sex operate in almost the exact same ways. The hormones, sensations, the anatomy involved, brain activity, receptors ... they are all so heavily intertwined. Our vulvas swell, blood flow is increased, we moan, sway our hips, deep breathing, sweat - we drop into a seriously sacred intimate space. Heck, women around the world are experiencing orgasmic childbirth. I wanted to make sure I had a piece of that pie!

And yet it still boggles people's minds when I let them in on my (not-so-dirty) little secret

Birth brings out the animal in me; and it is a feeling I shamelessly indulge. It can only be described as a lioness coming out of her cave - sexy, strong, capable, warm. My second baby's birth was remarkably more empowering than my first. Firstly, I laboured in the comfort of our home, with the people I love most. Secondly, because of the privacy, support, and love I felt wrapped in, my surges felt COMPLETELY different. They were intense, yes. But the wildness of them felt ... electric. Sensual. Powerful.

I remember one moment very vividly

As I neared transition (9-10 cm), I felt incredibly fragile, hopeless, and overwhelmed. (Transition can be such a fickle bitch!) Masturbation made the MOST sense to me as I laboured through my surges. I remember my husband saying, "Would you like to have sex?" And although I couldn't commit to sex in the moment, he must have read my mind! Clitoral stimulation worked an absolute TREAT. It shifted my focus to my vagina, to the energy brewing within me. It made me feel connected, and made me feel like I had some control over what I was feeling. The surges were much more manageable, and the rest between them was so much more enjoyable.

If I close my eyes now, I am taken back to that place. The hot water on my back, my husband's hands locked in mine, the safety of his presence, the happiness as I rode those wild waves. Orgasmic in a sexual way - no. Pleasure - YES. It was my glorious instinctual pain-relief system coming to life! I am so proud of myself for exploring an avenue so typically shamed.

'Women feel shamed that they have pleasure ... We have to change that'

For as far back as scientific, biblical, or medicine based text exist, birth has always been spoken about as something to 'endure'; pain as punishment for eating the apple off that damn tree. To boot, many people feel very uncomfortable with the idea of pleasure in childbirth. And hey, I get it. For some, it's a pretty big idea that takes us way out of our comfort zones.

Debra Pascali-Bonaro, pioneer and crusader for orgasmic birth, says, "It's such a culture where some women actually feel shamed that they have pleasure, because the expectation is pain ... We have to change that."

The good news is if you've made it this far you're, at the very least intrigued. Here are a few enticing reasons to take the shame out of pleasure, and put the sex back into childbirth!

1. 'What gets the baby in, gets the baby out!'

Oxytocin, baby. With a side of Endorphin and Adrenaline. (In all the right amounts, too!) Ina May was not kidding when she coined that term. Nipple, vaginal, clitoral stimulation, kissing, intimacy, affection; these all inspire the flow of our hormonal allies in birth. Experiencing a 'stalled' or lengthy labour? Need a natural pick-me-up? Touch yourself, mama! It gets the good stuff flowing.

2. Pain relief

Ever had a headache, or been hung-over, or couldn't sleep; and you instinctively decided on a mini-masturbation sesh? And then voila - headache magically gone? Well - many of us do it. And that's because it works. So why would it be any different to using clitoral stimulation during/between contractions? In 1988, a man by the name ofKomisaruk published a study in the Journal of Sex Research, that explored the idea that when “women stimulated their vaginas or clitorises, they became less sensitive to painful stimulation” [according to livescience.com].

“[In] rats, Komisaruk has found that vaginal stimulation blocks the release of a pain transmitter called Substance P… In other words, the sensory neurons tasked with transmitting their message of ‘ouch!’ to the central nervous system are stymied from the get-go. ’It’s an actual physiological, very primordial system of the genital system blocking pain input,’ Komisaruk said.”

3. It feels good!

Mood boost, anyone? Want to feel more relaxed? You know that dopey, satisfied, tired feeling you can get after an orgasm ... that's it right there. You may feel tense, anxious, stressed, unable to rest, mind racing - bring it back to basics with some deliciously luscious clitoral love.

Angela Gallo is currently raising money to travel the world and photograph different birth experiences, with the goal of producing a coffee table book.

kidspot can be viewed on multiple devices

a note about relevant advertising

We collect information about the content (including ads) you use across this site and use it to make both advertising and content more
relevant to you on our network and other sites. This is also known as Online Behavioural Advertising. You can find out more about our
policy and your choices, including how to opt-out here