A reflective journey on behaviour management

#challenges and opportunities

It’s good practice to reflect on the year gone by, the challenges, the opportunities and wisdom gained. In 2015 I faced many challenges, like many of us did, some were internal struggles, some external and at the end of 2015 I decided to focus on how I eventually overcame these, and the learning I can take forward from them.

I learned opportunities come disguised as challenges, of course I have always known this, but did I remember this when I was emotionally downtrodden with no support around me? Of course not. Often, as human nature does, we get caught up in the challenge aspect of the situation, but looking really deep, and hard, we will find the opportunity and potential that is arising from the situation. There are many times this year where I have only seen the struggles, yet overtime I am beginning to realise, or rather comprehend, that at every given moment, we have a choice of love or compassion. In everyday life, given that choice and making the right choice just makes life more bearable.

When looking around at people, most often they do not realise they have that choice. As humans we either become victims of our circumstances or martyrs. It’s taken me a while to realise it’s all about the heart, and the heart needs to direct the mind. By the end of 2015 I had worked through a number of family issues and came to realise that I had contributed to my own “suffering”. Having grown as a person, I have realised the present moment is all that matters, not projecting into the future to find peace, it is found in the here and now amongst all the challenges and struggles we are faced with.

I need a lot of time to myself, to recharge, re centre and reconnect to the love and compassion that exists within me, and each and every one of us has this within us. I know how I have to work at this every day, some days are easier than others. It also brings to light how people who do not do this cope. Just sitting and connecting to ourselves, to the love, compassion and grace within us can really start to enhance and empower our lives. You begin to realise you are far greater than the situation, or emotions that arise from it.

I try to sit and meditate regularly. Even so, there are days I get apprehensive as I know there are issues I am avoiding and will come to light. This is when I have to remember, just where there is the pain, there is also a part of me that is able to be in a state of love, grace and compassion and that there is a solution to everything.

Letting go in times of injustice and unfairness is hard. There are things that have happened last year I found it hard to do this with. Putting this into perspective, what about those who don’t sit down and look within, how hard would it be to let go then? I know as I have been there, you just reposition things, but they don’t go away, the hurt will just build, and sometimes we end up doing it to ourselves because we are not willing to let go.

I have found that even a small amount of concentration on the love and compassion within can start to make huge transformations. I can see the journey I have had to undertake to experience this and the challenges I have faced in order to create the opportunity for me to practise this. Some days were definitely easier than others, and my reading, the courses I have attended with (@suezange), my comprehension has now begun to teach me that at every opportunity, usually in meditation for me, to nurture and grow the love I have. There are no two ways about it, you have to work at it. There are things like family, that can “get in the way,” work issues, global issues, lineage issues, if at any point one or more of these could be triggering around you, what holds you together in your space? It’s the capacity to love, it’s the capacity to hold grace, it’s the capacity to have compassion in your eyes. How do you achieve this in an instant? It is because it needs to be practised and practised until you know it, you are familiar with it and it is you. It is a journey. Everyday this must be practised, sitting still and meditating, or even sitting still and just growing and connecting with the love, compassion and grace within so it becomes bigger and greater than any of the issues you are faced with. Let’s face it, it is all energy and energy can be transformed with light, a higher vibration of love, compassion and grace.

So, there was no point in me sitting at home and practising this, what about the real world? The test came when I had a family emergency and had to work together. Though I love my family I found I was able to hold a certain level of grace and compassion and make amends with certain members. At other times I attended get togethers which I would have avoided previously, because I was able to see beyond the struggles and see the love that also exists in the same space. There is a purity of love and compassion that comes with family and dear friends and that’s what I need to focus more on. I am grateful for all the people and situations in my life, though I saw them as huge challenges, it was these that forced me into seeing opportunities in each challenge and how to manage them.

It would be lovely if you could also share the wisdom you have gained from your challenges and situations.