Have you seen the latest Kathy Bates commercial for Turbo Tax? Haunted by ghostly dead children, she wants to know if she can use them as a deduction. I can relate. I have a demon washing machine.

One morning, I sat at the kitchen counter and my washer beeped. It was an unusual sound. Persistent. Frantic. Nonstop. The machine had never warned me like that before. It seemed to be crying out for help.

“What the hell?” I ran to my laundry room. The door of the front loader hung wide open. How could it beep with the door open? As I stepped toward it, cold water seeped through my socks. My gaze dropped to the puddle on the floor.

“Are you kidding me?” I picked up one soaked foot.

The empty washer had filled with the door open…. by itself. But how? The machine had been turned off.

I set it to Drain. The washer obeyed while I wiped up the water. I dismissed it as a random washer failure.

Two days later, I walked into the laundry room with a basket of dirty clothes and towels. I stepped into yet another cold puddle of water.

Crap!

Setting the basket on the counter, I looked inside the empty washer. It had filled with the door open, AGAIN!

I wiped the floor and then made small piles to launder the following week. There would be a lot more after a weekend in the mountains. My washer works better with full loads, anyway.

This time I unplugged the machine. There was no way it could work without electricity. I smiled and packed up to leave.

Late Tuesday afternoon, I walked into the laundry room with more dirty clothes and stepped into water all over the floor. While hanging limp across the top of the washer, the plug gloated as if to say, “See? It wasn’t me.”

How did it fill?

I turned off both the hot and cold water taps. Righty tighty. It couldn’t possibly fill now. I shut the washing machine’s door, just in case. I usually kept it open to keep mildew from growing on the rubber gasket. Poor design, in my opinion.

For four days, piles of clothes and towels had soaked up tepid water. They stunk. Lifting the sodden mess into a laundry basket, I dragged it downstairs to my GE stackable. Starting with towels, I washed them with soap and they still smelled musty. I washed them again with vinegar and a third time with soap to get the vinegar smell out of them. What a process.

Filling the upper dryer with clean towels, I decided to go to bed.

The next morning, I walked to the stackable’s dryer, but the door was already open. What? The weight of the towels must have pushed on it during the night. They were still wet. I had to run them through the wash again. Such bad luck.

I felt like Kathy Bates. Was the ghost in my house a compulsive clothes washer? Had it used a rock to clean its unmentionables down by the river when it was alive? Surely I had fixed the water problem by turning it off.

With fingers crossed, I entered the possessed laundry room. Slowly, I opened my washer’s door. Water poured out. I slammed it shut. How? HOW????

It didn’t make any sense. My husband checked the water lines. Yep. They were shut off. The cord still dangled across the top of the machine. It taunted me. How could this be happening?

Danny shrugged. “Maybe you should call someone,” he said.

“Like an Priest or an exorcist?” I asked.

I called an appliance serviceman and said, “Yes, I have a demon washer,” and then explained what was going on.

The resident expert suggested disconnecting the hoses. That way I would know if the valves were broken. A new machine wouldn’t fix the problem if a valve needed replacement or repair. Danny disconnected them.

As I stared at the dangling plug and disconnected hoses, I wondered what I would do if the washer filled and spilled water onto the floor again. Was this the start of some new crazy haunting? We’ve had bangers and I’ve seen ghosts, but this one could be destructive. I imagined wading through a flooded home, Roxy dog-paddling beside me.

It’s been a few weeks and the faucets remained dry. No wet socks. No mysterious filling. No beeping in frenetic warning since that very first day. The washer was definitely the demon. My stackable has been doing all the work.

I asked Facebook friends what kind of washing machine I should buy. A friend replied, “One without a demon.” We’ll see. I plan on purchasing a new washer this week.

Stay tuned my friends. I hope I don’t say, “I’m going to have to move again,” like Kathy Bates. I’ll keep a lifejacket in my kitchen, just in case.

Have you ever experienced unexplainable events in your house? What kind of washing machine should I buy? My Frigidaire front loader was the worst.

We have a slightly less possessed washing machine. We have one of those fancy front loading washers. And for years now, it just starts beeping at random times. Sometimes the beeping will go on and on, sometimes it will stop pretty quickly. Sometimes, we’ll hit the Cancel button to turn it off and stop the beeping and the beeping will start up again a few minutes later. Fortunately, no flooding though.

That is so annoying and strange. Our smoke detector/sprinkler system is connected to our alarm. One night it went off. “FIRE! FIRE! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE IMMEDIATELY!” *SIRENS* We ran all over the house, but couldn’t find anything. Then a small arcing light streaked across the wall. I looked around, but behind me was the kitchen. So freakin’ weird. That was back when paranormal activity in our house was at it’s peak and doors would slam.

Yeah… you need to phone a young priest and an old priest. Your machine is possessed. Nothing crazy with appliances in my house. But I also have cats, which that explains a lot of the weirdness. Tipped basket of clean clothes — the cats. That pile of vomit — the cats. Shoes across the room — the cats.

Cats! I have a dog who loves to sleep in laundry baskets, especially if it holds clean clothes. GAH! She trained me to put everything away, finally. Dogs love to roll in horrid messes in the yard…
I’m a little nervous about buying a new one. What if it keeps happening? The good news? I wanted to buy a new one anyway.
Thanks for reading!

Bizarre & Demonic!!! I love that commercial with Kathy Bates. You could be in that insurance commercial – you with your life jacket on and Roxie dog paddling next to you – this occurred February 2017 with Susie and Roxie and do not let it happen to you. I think investing in a new wash machine is a good idea instead of a inflatable raft. Be Safe Wild Rider 🙂 Happy Day – Enjoy

Hahaha! I’m still laughing. Yep, I can see it on Turbo Tax now… 🙂
Thanks so much for reading. All of this is totally true. I keep expecting to find water on the floor again. I just hope it doesn’t start again with a new washer. That would really suck!

My mother moved into the house her crazy uncle had lived and died in. Each year on the anniversary of his death the dryer (which had been his dryer) in the basement went on by itself. Also the bathroom shelf in his bathroom fell off the wall.

Have you seen the videos the guy makes using his washing machine? He plays guitar, and his drummer, “Ken E More” plays the drums. His stuff is hilarious. Here’s a link to him using the washer to play the song “Devil Went Down to Georgia”

Oh my! I love that Kathy Bates commercial. I have no advice on what washer to buy. Seems pretty much everything in my house is “haunted” on some level lately…As for strange things and appliances, my parents constantly fought over the coffee pot. My dad hated it (I think it was a Mr. Coffee) and wanted to buy a new one but my mom loved it. The day he died the damn thing actually caught on fire. We all saw it with our own eyes. Looks like my dad had the last laugh. (he was always giving us signs like that over the years)

That gave me SHIVERS, Darla! Whoa. He did have the last laugh or she would probably still be using it.
I’ve all kinds of strangeness happen over the years. When I first started blogging, I answered a comment about burnt toast reminding me of my grandmother. She had an ancient toaster that never worked properly. I threw in a piece of bread a half hour later and the smoke detectors went off! I pulled out the burnt toast, but it worked after that. Weirdness!

Our dryer has a demon in it. Now that I know washers get demons in them as well, I’m worried. Can’t wait to see what brand and type of machine you buy. Soon, very soon, we’re going to need to do the same thing.

Somewhere, there is a haunted Black Hole with water pouring into it and going, by way of an n-dimensional wormhole, right into your washer. But, once the hoses were disconnected, the aquatic version of Maxwell’s Demon (as opposed to his cousin, the Silver Hammer) was stymied and even it could not imagine a plausible explanation and had to stop. It might be wise to get the haunted washer out of the room before the new one arrives, just in case.

How bizarre! While reading that I’m thinking there’s nothing science couldn’t explain. It has to be. :p Must be some kind of leaks…something! I agree with Samsung washing machine…avoid them or your whole house will go down. :p

I almost didn’t blog this story. I decided last night after posting about it on Facebook. No one said anything about Samsung. I wouldn’t have known about them burning up. Scary, especially in this house!
There’s no explanation for it. The appliance guy said it could be the draining hose. No way. It’s not a syphon. Water would flood from the drain. It’s so strange!!!

I’m glad you did, Susie. Maybe there was really a tiny gremlin that got stuck inside…
There have been a few news of the washing machine in the recent months following their phone that launched with an explosion and ended with a bang. :p I somehow think they curb such news as much as they can

I know!!! I was going to post something completely different, but took to FB last night. “I have a demon washing machine and need to replace it. What should I buy?” The comments were great, so I decided to tell the story. I keep thinking it’s going to flood again.

Ok I got one for you…you know those toy phones that kids play with that make the beeps? You know the ones that are supposed to sound like a real phone but really don’t. My daughter had one when she was little and it was just going nuts. We figured something got stuck and it was continuously beeping. My daughter loved It but it was diving me batty. So I took the batteries out. I laid it on the kitchen counter and we went out that night. Now remember “no batteries”. We came back that night it and it was beeping like someone was playing with it. We heard it through the door. We come in the house and it was going off. It freaked both of us out. Needless to say I threw it out.

I have seen this before’ yes’ I am sure of it’ a scene right out of ‘Arsenic and Old Lace…’ someone is trying to ‘bump someone off’ because the Malt service has slowed down and taken back burner to other endeavors. That or its Brownies or Poetry Geese…

‘That or your home is built over a Victorian era Chinese Launder Shop’ having long ago serviced the Laundry needs of the Colorado Gold Miners when they needed clean pressed shirts for Sunday morning church service, after Saturday Night Saloon sin. So in that case’ yep’ you’re spooked all right’ haunted to quite Frank about it… so’ So cancel the Friday Night Lindau Fondue and Yoga Toga Twister party, and instead hold a Susie’s Séance and during the Séance you slam the table with your shot glass after tossing back some ‘Some Liquefied Poltergeist confrontation courage, aka ‘Spirits’… and tell ‘them’ / ‘they’ in strict no nonsense Sichuan Chinese: “Look’! If you’re going to mess around with my Knickers and Socks at least sort the households Laundry piles properly.

‘I hate Squishy socks’ but if it really is a matter of Poultry Geese’ be careful because I hear they can be as moody as heck and vary Vindictive to say the least of it…

You are HILARIOUS, Brock! Ha!
I like the idea of sitting them down and chewing them out. I’ve done that before. All is quiet in said laundry, but maybe I should have instructed them on proper folding before they skedaddled. Dang!

Great post Susie. My inner detective went to work right away. My initial thought was that your husband was the culprit because a.) as a husband myself, I KNOW its always my fault until proven otherwise and b.) my wife and I have unknowingly had a similar tug-o-war with the washing machine (she likes to turn the water off after each use in the unlikely event there is a leak, while I hate starting up a load of laundry only to find the water hasn’t been turned back on). However, your husband jumped in on the troubleshooting.

That’s the first thought I had! “Did Danny run a load of clothes before work?” Ha! But it wasn’t the normal beep.
It’s so strange since the water WAS turned off along with the electricity. It wasn’t until they were completely disconnected that it stopped flooding. I still haven’t replaced the machine. I hope the next one is demon-free! *shivers*

I hope your next one is “demon-free” too Susie. For what it’s worth, here in Romania, a wise Gypsy friend stations herself outside a market we shop at, and is more than happy to offer counter-curses for those pesky supernatural interferences. And for special friends, she offers can’t-miss relationship advice.

So, if the new machine doesn’t fix old problems, I can put in a good word for you 😉

Well, you know Boulder: energy washes differently there.
(Samsung washers area all over the news here the past few months….pampering old washer until sure what to buy…but mounds of wet towels – ugh. At least here those can be dropped outside to dry in sun and heat ( already…double ugh)
Have you tried drawing a circle around it …bound to be some folk lore available for that….check with the Stanley?

So I’m laying in bed last night when your washer demon crossed my mind followed by the thought, “Scooby Doo, where are you?” I think it’s time to call in Mystery, Inc. Who benefits most from these mishaps? Proctor and Gamble? The local water company? If Scooby and the gang taught me anything it’s this: When you can answer that question you will have caught your culprit. One hint; It’s NOT Red Herring. Good luck!

Ha! Good thinking, Bella! There was always a logical explanation. The service man was convinced it was the water taps, but they’re fine. I just checked. Without electricity and water taps turned off, it’s weird that it could overfill. It’s not like that much would just lay in the hoses. And it couldn’t come back up from the drain, since it’s not a tight seal. I’ll be really FREAKING OUT if our new washer does the same thing!
I’ll keep you posted.

When I was young we had a washing machine in the garage that electrocuted you if you touched it. I was pushing my bicycle past it one day, and got stuck to it. Dad didn’t believe us until he touched it one day…

Oh, WOW! You’re lucky to be alive to tell the tale! It never occurred to me how walking in water with the possibility of an electrical problem could have been deadly. And then it flooded while unplugged and with the water shut off!
I plan let the appliance guy deal with it when we replace it. I’ll shut the door until then…
Thanks for stopping by!

I enjoyed the post. The case for possession seems questionable. I don’t consider a household appliance to be possessed with a demon (or lesser supernatural critter) until it growls or spews pea soup. These occurrences have all the earmarks of a gremlin, but that’s just my opinion. I hope your new washer resolves the issue!

Right??? This stuff just keeps happening. You should have heard the exasperation in the voice of the appliance repairman. He pretty much thought I was crazy and the faucets leaked. Nope!
That ad really cracks me up! Love Kathy Bates.

Do you know how to smudge your house with sage? If you’ve got any pesky spirits messing with you, this can usher them out. Check it out on YouTube if you don’t know about this. Anyone can do it. You don’t need someone to do it for you. The valves in my house (that bring water to the washing machine) can sometimes leak when minerals build up. I get water dripping into the washer and it can fill up in a number of days. To clear the stuff out, I turn the washer on and off very quickly and then do it a few more times. It shakes the pipes and valves when I do it quickly, shaking loose mineral buildup. I have an older top loader. Good luck with everything and enjoy having a new machine!

Thanks so much, Susan! I missed your comment. Sheesh!
I will check out that video since our house has something… There is sage in our backyard, so I can make one to burn. I’ll let you know how it goes. We’ve had the hoses unhooked for weeks now with no drips. It’s so very strange!!!

Thanks so much, Traci!
It has been one thing after another. I don’t think it’s the house. I think I attract them! Our banger was gone and now it’s back too. I just hope when we buy a new washer, that it doesn’t act up too! Then I will sound like Kathy Bates, “I’m going to have to move again.” Ha!

I don’t know if Fisher and Paykel smart drive washers are available in the US but they are pretty good. Used to be a NZ company, very innovative. Their washing machines have precisely 2 moving parts: the direct-drive washing tub and the lid lock. It’s possible the warranty covers exorcisms. That said, the computer on my 2 year old one blew up. As in exploded with a bang I heard from the other side of the house. They came to my house to fix it, which took 20 mins and involved swapping out the main circuit board. The tech said he hadn’t seen that fault often and couldn’t explain it. Hmmn…

That is crazy for your computer to BLOW UP! What did you say to it? Ha! I hope it was backed up, which reminds me… I’ll do that tonight. You never know!
We don’t have those brands, but I’m staying away from Samsung since it appears they burn up like their cell phones. Don’t need that!

Yes, washing machine fires are definitely a downer when it comes to washing machines – we’ve had the Samsung burn-up problem here in NZ. I wouldn’t buy one. The F&P brand was NZ’s top – and a local invention – but the company sold out to international owners. I was a bit ambiguous in the comment – the detonating computer was in the washing machine – it was the controller. The machine totally didn’t work after that although it had no mechanical fault. Typical Kiwi ingenuity – “let’s put a computer into the washing machine to run everything and take out all the moving parts that did it before”. Works a treat until something goes bang.

Ohhhhhhh! That would be terrible!
I spoke with a contractor and he can’t understand what’s happening either. One friend suggested a water surge, but it isn’t. I’m still using my stackable and hope my new one isn’t infected! Talk about the Ghost and the Machine. Ha!
Thanks for you comment, Kathy!

Good luck with your new machine. I had a Samsung that was recalled. I never had any problems but sent it back to be safe. It was replaced with a Samsung. So, keeping my fingers crossed. So much if a headache for a washing machine!