Now that was funny. It's like he ripped the words right out of Morley Safer's mouth. Or, more to the point, stole his formula.

It starts here, with a lackluster establishing shot of a significant location.

Next, a walky-talkly preamble from the auteur, pacing steadily towards the lens, punctuating every other sentence with a hand gesture, and ignoring all the prigs milling around him, like he's gliding through the fucking matrix, before coming to a halt and posing a question: What comes next?

What else do they do at J-school? My colleagues spent quite a bit of time eating fries, drinking beer, and discussing whether their real names were adequate for news-anchorship, or if they needed to come up with a nom de screen.

One guy had a whole theory about your first name had to be one syllable, and your last name had to be two (or vice versa - I forget). Of course, every time he stated his "principle," someone else could reel off five or six current network personalities whose names violated his rule. Idiots.