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Press Release: Liam Doocey gave presentation on 'Parenting with Confidence' at the Carlton Hotel on the 25th February last. This talk was organsied and coordinated by the Kinsale Youth Support Services (KYSS). He began by outlining that when it comes to parenting there is no such thing as an expert, but what we can strive for is to be the best parent that we can be. Liam commented that our children and teenagers have been born into a different era, and that most homes have a vast array of technoloigcal devices, but that the families have lost the skill of conversation and effective communication.

An important message was that we are not there to act as their friend, but rather their parent and we need our children to understand that a times, we will make decisions for them that they will not like. As a parent, we see dangers everywhere, as we try to protect our children and teenagers, who do not seems to see these dangers anywhere. As a parent, our most difficult challenges occur when there are times of crisis or distress. If teenagers have been included and consulted as part of creating boundaries in a household, then they are far more likely to respect these boundaries, and not see it is a challenge to breach them.

Running around after teenaagers, trying to protect and smother them doesn't help anyone. If we apporach things by provinding them with information which will help them to make better choices, it's far more effective and benefical. As a teenager, we need to empahsise to them the difference between having rights, and having responsiblities. We need to be respectful about their friends, and the things that that they are interested in, and be prepared to be an active listener. Parents must show their chidlren that they will be avalalble to listen to them, and encourage discussion. Sometimes teenagers will not discuss difficult situations because they are afraid of how their parents will react. these are the very times that children need their parents most where we must be supportive, and not judgemental, and realise that we have all made mistakes, and poor choices. None of us are perfect, and we myst acknowledge that.

Part of the difficulty in the current age of techology is that our mistakes are available for others to see, which increases the pressure further. Liam ended his excellent presentation by make the point that as a parent; it's alright to say 'I don't know', but that we can find out, and seek the support that is needed.