5 point freedom scale in relationships

Recently I came up with a rather simple political map I called the ‘5 point freedom scale‘ which mapped levels of freedom in society from poor (level 1) through to excellent (level 5). I then looked at the role of these competing levels had on world politics, in an article I called ‘The current world order instability’. This was a brief summary of two competing visions for a New World Order, one that would see level 3 and 4 societies retreat into level 2 dictatorships, probably based on corrupting the level 3 concern with ‘Free Market’ into a corporate ideology. The other was those forces of the currently emerging level 5 organisations, that increasing win battles against the combined might of the other four levels combined.

However, in discussing all this I came to realise that a far more important application of the 5 point model was in analysis of inter-personal relations. It also has magical application in that it has implications in the way we interact with spirits. It should also be understood that each level builds upon the previous, taming some of its unpleasant aspects, whilst also bringing in new obstacles to overcome. Maybe level 5 isn’t really the end either…

Level 1: When a relationship involves one party doing as they are told by the another party under threat of violence, or use of coercion, then this is a level 1 relationship. Examples:

Old style ceremonial magician bossing grimoire demons about with threat of violence from monotheistic god.

Worshipper religiously observing commands of a deity under threat of divine punishment.

Bully stealing sandwiches from another child in the school playground with threat of punching.

But it also appears in more subtle forms. If one party gets away with behaviour they would not themselves tolerate in others, purely because they hold a monopoly on the use of force, then they are engaging in level 1 behaviour. Examples:

A website owner making rude comments to other posters, that other posters would get banned for.

Key areas of attitude:

Power: Strength and might

Morality: Obedience

Property: Who ever can take and hold onto it

Truth: Whatever power says it is, “Might makes right”

Spirituality: Blood, nation, family, race

Level 2: A relationship is in level 2 when participants judge each other based on some ideological criteria. For example, if we mistook this 5 point map for the actual territory, and turned it into an ideology, we might start calling each other out for low level behaviour. The irony here is that kind of calling out would itself be a level 2 behaviour. In practise calling out level 1 behaviour is probably okay, because at least level 2 is a step up from that. However, level 2 relies on the use of dogma, the mistaking of words for a moral truth.

It also appears in more subtle ways. For example, when someone feels justified in rude behaviour towards another because they think the other person is ‘wrong’ according to the ideology they hold.

The key phrase for level 2 then is ‘ogma makes right’.

Key areas of attitude:

Power: The word

Morality: Dogma

Property: Defined by written law

Truth: According to sacred text

Spirituality: Book, faith, fellow believers

Level 3: A relationship is on level 3 when it is based on trade. This is the first level based on consent, although it isn’t necessarily free from coercion. The trade does not always involve money. Goods and services may be exchanged for other goods and services. Examples:

Magician or sorcerer making offerings to a spirit or god as payment for magical success.

Employee exchanging their time and effort in exchange for payment from an employer.

Sales person who is only trying to sell you something.

On a friendship level it can become a barrier to companionship when:

A friend who thinks everyone in the group should do what they want, because they’re the one with money/property.

When someone thinks they can be rude to others because they are more ‘successful’.

Someone tries to only make friends with people they think they can use to further their career, or otherwise get something out of that they want.

Level 3 doesn’t make a good basis for friendship since it tends to be based on each party looking out only for themselves, and trying to get as much out of the other as they can whilst giving as little as possible. As a result, it undermines mutual cooperation through exploitative manipulation. Cooperation only lasts whilst interests align closely, until one side feels they can betray the other, or misjudges how far they can take without upsetting the apple cart.

Key areas of attitude:

Power: Wealth. “Money makes the world go round”

Morality: Market forces.

Property: Is liberty.

Truth: What the customer says it is.

Spirituality: Profit, cash flow, banks, money, charity

Level 4: Level 4 relationships revolves around critical thinking, objective measurements, a desire for fairness, pragmatism, finding solutions, science, mathematics, statistics, game theory and models. These are powerful tools that can help us achieve pretty much whatever we want. Therefore organisation between individuals in a level 4 relationship involves negotiation, discussion and potentially compromise. If poor models are chosen, or individuals assume conflicting models, then arguments can result, which only discussion of assumptions made can resolve.

Key areas of attitude:

Power: Information

Morality: Avoidance of harm

Property: Is defined and controlled by economic models

Truth: Is what we measure

Spirituality: Humanism, humanitarianism, objectivity

Level 5:
If level 4 concerns the scientific measurable truth, what can possibly come higher than that? Only something that can give guidance to what we should be measuring. Obviously lower levels try and do that. Level 3 tries to control the direction of science by funding it. Level 2 tries to control it with morality. Level 1 takes what it can from it for weapons and espionage. But all these causes attempt to pervert the truth of science, and drag relationships back into authoritarianism. Level 5 then would be some principle that directs the choice of models we use without perverting their truth. One that leads to ways of cooperation between individuals that ensure a world free of coercion and force. I humbly propose compassion as the key. Not the first to say as much I know…

So a level 5 relationship you aren’t seeking to control someone against their will, you aren’t trying to dictate your personal morality, no matter how much you believe you are right, you aren’t thinking about how to sell something to them, or how you might exploit them for profit. Nor are you trying to measure and negotiate the relationship, although that might prove a pre-requisite. Instead you feel empathy for them. Know in yourself why they are like they are, and know how best to deal with difficult situations. Know how to express your own needs. If someone upsets you, learn how to express that with compassion, so you don’t hurt them back.

I know I need to work on some of these areas myself. I’ve neglected them far too long.

Key areas of attitude:

Power: True Will, Emergence

Morality: Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. Love is the law. Love under will.

I hereby declare that from now onwards, I aim towards level 5 in my interactions with fellow KIA agents, my close family and friends especially, and in my relationships with the world in general. I will likely fall in this goal but hopefully the longer I keep at it, the more I will attain this.

Interesting stuff! Strangely enough I was recently thinking a lot about compassion and its importance in relationships. I realised a strong interdependence between stress and compassion in myself meaning that the more stress I experience in my everyday life the less compassionate I become. Stress in its core is a very self- centred emotion that clouds a person’s judgement of a given situation. It also absorbs our attention- when stressed it is hard for us to think of anything else than ourselves. On the contrary when we feel relaxed we become more open to other people and their needs.

Since modern lifestyle and system we currently live in promote stress they automatically program us to be less compassionate people. If we lived in the level 5 society we would be more likely to from level 5 relationships. We can also try to reverse this process and by awakening compassionate personality inside us we can slowly lead our society towards the higher stage of development.

@anton If I understand this correctly, your descriptions of the five levels are at least partly subjective rather than set in stone, particularly for the higher levels. In that being less dogmatic they become less rigid and harder to define. I guess also there may be a little of the map not being mistaken for the territory. In any actual interaction between people, we probably communicate on all five levels, just not in equal proportions.

Furthermore, the listener may not ‘tune in’ to the level we think we project, even if we mistakenly think this is the prodimantent level we are projecting. A listener particularly sensitive to level 2 communication may not hear the level 5 call for compassion or the level 4 call for reason, instead interpretting such communications only on the level of a rival level 2 dogma.

@hippi Valuing genuine compassion I think is key to combatting psychopathy. Whilst it is true that a psychopath may ’emulate’ compassionate behaviour in order to advance themselves selfishly, this would actually be a good thing. The closer psychopaths are forced to act as if they were someone with actual compassion, the better their actions will be. Everyone wins. Charity they say begins at home. If we want a level 5 society, we need to start by aiming for level 5 relationships with our friends and family, and building level 5 communities. A level 5 society can only emerge from the bottom up.

A very interesting post, and interesting comments too, particularly as steeped in Native American spirituality as I am at the moment, heheh!
I have no idea if I knew as much at the time that I was around the same age, you are all far wiser than your years. I would like to hope so, but I have no way of comparison really, as I never really found a way to explain what it felt like, so I never have had anything to personally say about relationships.
I agree that in most cases, there appears to be a varying mix of all 5 levels. but personally, I tend to seek the company of those that ‘feel comfortable’ in the first place.
Guess I have become accustomed to trust my intuition in many things, and it seems to me that the more I do it, the easier it becomes.