Dancing through life and motherhood!

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Monthly Archives: July 2015

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Im just coming back from an amazing weekend with some exceptional women and mothers/ As we all talked about our career goals and highlights I started reflecting on the hardest job that I have and will every have and that is being a Mother.

Think back to the steps you took when you interviewed for your most recent job. You probably did something like this…

1. Read the job description…

2. Did some research on the company…

3. Discussed the salary and the benefits…

4. Decided YES this is for me…

Ok now lets talk about motherhood- its a job right so shouldn’t the same steps apply? Ha!

1. You can’t do step one can you?

Lets be honest the real reason a job description doesnt exist for being a mom is because NO one in the right mind would take the job and in this case I do believe ignorance is bliss…It was so nice to live in that blissful land where you really thought babies were born knowing how to sleep all night and that teeth just magically appeared with no pain.

Before becoming a mommy I believed my 40+ hour work week was the hardest schedule I would ever have and that answering to my bosses demands and balancing work and my social life was just to much to handle that I would often sleep until noon on Saturday’s.

There is no way that I could have possibility imagined what becoming a mother would do to my life and more importantly my heart.

Speaking honestly I don’t always love being a mother. A mother is a custodian, cook, errand runner, maid, miracle worker, tantrum stopper, diaper changer, and on and on and on.

BUT I love being a Mama!

A MAMA is the woman responsible for shaping the hearts of her babies.

A MAMA knows she should greet her babies with a smile every morning because that sets their day in the right direction.

A MAMA knows that her babies are watching her every move and that even before they can say it they want to be just like you.

A MAMA knows that her babies don’t care what she wears or drives just as long as SHE is present reading, laughing, playing and creating memories that will become the framework of their little lives.

A MAMA knows that she is irreplaceable and that no one else can take her place.

In order for me to be ok with taking a job I didn’t sign up for I had to stop calling myself a Mother and look at myself through the same lens that my baby girls do..the Mama lens.

A simple change in perspective can make even the most mundane tasks of motherhood more meaningful and I always thought mothers who said that were crazy. Seriously how can doing the laundry be FUN..come on! But you know what it can be. When I say Cupcake its time to do the laundry she comes running with a big smile on her face and says “Mama, I help you”!

She takes each item one at a time and with all of her little effort makes sure it gets completely in the washing machine. When all the clothes are in, I lift her up and she pushes the button and says “Mama, I did it all by myself”.

That’s all it took for her to be happy in “her” little world!

When we take away all of the tasks of doing and achieving we can really get to the heart of motherhood. Loving my babies is a job I know I can do and can do well.

This is one position that will NEVER need to be filled by anyone else but ME and I’m happy with that.

Love is NOT about perfection Love is about intention and I intend to purposefully love by babies with all I have. The tasks associated with Motherhood can wait what they need is for me to show up every day and love them with everything I have.

These little questions are becoming the norm for my little Cupcake to ask me- ALL DAY LONG! Right now, these questions are cute and innocent in nature and are mostly referring to the big truck we see as we drive to music class or a new sound she hears as we go about our day. This morning she heard a sound that I quickly said was a bird chirping and she said very proudly “No, Mama that’s not a bird, what is that OTHER sound?” I looked at her and said oh, that sound is a cricket singing and she said, okay Mama!

She is 2.5- and correcting me already..I’m in BIG trouble.

You see one day soon she will start asking me Why? and How? questions and she won’t be referring to sounds and trucks… honestly I’m not sure if I’m ready to answer what she may ask me!

My sweet Cupcake is smart as a whip and very inquisitive so I know it won’t be long before a simple one word answer will NOT suffice and for the subject matter to be about the little differences she observes in the people, places and things around her.

You know I thought the difficult part of parenting was the late night nursing sessions and managing two little ones in diapers, which I’m still doing- wish me continued luck on the potty training business. Telling her not to pee pee on Minni Mouse isn’t quite working… but looking ahead I know that is NOT the hard part!…labor intensive, YES!.. but one day they talk back to you and that chapter of all of the baby books was missing from my copies!

I have been praying a lot for God to give me the courage, strength and the right words to tell her when she asks me character- building questions and I think he spoke to me clearly during a little trip we made to a lavender farm near our house.

At the farm you pick your own lavender and they give you a basket and scissors and send you on your way. There are rows and rows of lavender and they describe to you which ones will make the BEST ones and then off you go.

My Cupcake heads off running and begins to start pulling them out of the ground and I gently tell her “Honey, we want to cut them gently so we don’t ruin them!” and she says,” OK, Mama”.

She starts running again and says “Look, Mama!” as she spots a bunch of flowers that weren’t lavender and I said “Honey, those are beautiful but we are picking lavender today” She threw a bit of a typical toddler fit but I ran along and said “follow me!” to snap her out of it.

She did the best that she could to focus on the task but I had to help her a lot! When I thought she was really going to lose it one of the workers asked her if she would like to fed the bunnies. Then, the BEST thing happened…instead of running off she looked at me with her big eyes and smiled and said “I go fed the bunnies, Mama?” and I said “Sure baby, that’s fine!”

In that moment I knew God had given me my answer. Show her the way through your actions, guide her back on the right path when you see she is going astray and trust that she will look to you for guidance.

I know I’m going to have some pretty complicated questions ahead of me and I’m going to need a lot of guidance of my own when I have two teenage girls at the same time, but my experience at the farm taught me a valuable lesson. My girls will decide what to put in their basket of life by seeing what I put in mine.

I’m choosing to put love, acceptance, humility, patience, forgiveness, understanding and joy in my basket and my sweet girls will be watching as I do.