Date: Sat, 25 Nov 2000 02:36:41 +0000
From: caz.birch@uk.dreamcast.com
Subject: Shane and Nicky 3
This is gay fiction about the irish boyband westlife.
Disclaimer: i don't know westlife, this is purely fiction, they are not
gay, so please don't read anything into it, if you're not supposed to be
here, please leave, otherwise enjoy.:)
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Kian, bryan, mark, bethany and nicky were waiting in the lobby for shane
Nicky was a crushed man, he leant against a window, no one knew what w
as wrong with him.
Bryan, his oldest friend tried to talk to him.
"Nic, what's eating you?"
"Nothing" He mumbled, his head hung low, not meeting bryan's gaze
"Come on, i know something's wrong. Did you and shane have a fight?"
"I guess" He finally met bryan's eyes "Bry, he was so cold towards me, t
old me to leave him alone"
"But why nix?"
"That's what i wanna know"
"Well now's not the time for you to be miserable, come on nic, it'll be
alright"
"I wish i had your optimism"
Bry smiled and hugged nicky "I'll go tell him to get a move on okay?"
"Okay" he smiled
"Shane! Open the door! Rehearsals are needed, a quick run through, remem
ber?" Bry hollered through the door. Finally the door opened, and shane
walked out.
"I'm here, stop yelling" He mumbled
"Man, you look like shit!"
"Cheers, just what i needed to hear"
They walked downstairs, kian yelled "Finally, we can go! What were you d
oing shay?"
"Nothing, just thinking" He looked at nicky, but he was staring at the g
round.
"Well, enough of this small talk, we have to go" Mark joked.
They all got in the limos, shane, mark and bethany in one, and nicky kia
n and bry in the other. Mark and bethany were cuddled up in the limo, sh
ane hung his head, mark noticed and put his hand on his shoulder. Shane
looked up
"Shane, you look miserable"
"Not you as well, can't anyone say anything nice about me!"
"I'm just been truthful, nicky looked like shit too, he looked like his
heart had been ripped in two"
Shane went pale "Oh shit! it's all my fault"
"Why? What did you do?"
"Erm...forget i said anything mark"
"No! what happened?"
"Look, i'll tell you later, i can see you're busy" He glanced at bethany
, mark smiled.
"Oh bethany, you and shane haven't been formally introduced" She smiled
"Shane, i'm bethany" "Hello bethany" He shook her hand and smiled, but i
t didn't reach his eyes. He looked her up and down, she was beautiful, y
et he wasn't attracted to her, he knew he was gay, but tried to ignore i
t. Maybe if he ignored it then it'd go away, but that wasn't going to ha
ppen.
They arrived at the point, and they stepped out of the limo. The sunligh
t blinded shane's view, he covered his eyes from the sun. He spotted bry
kian and nicky just ahead of him. He couldn't stop staring at nicky, he
was transfixed, he couldn't move. Nicky turned around looking for shane
, he met shane's stare, and he smiled at him. Shane's heart skipped a be
at, the hairs on theback of his neck stood up, he tried to return the sm
ile, but instead all he could do was shed a tear. Nicky looked hurt, he
didn't see him cry, all he saw was shane not happy, he rushed inside.
Shane pulled himself together and slowly walked inside. He headed to the
stage and sat down next to kian.
"Where were you?" Kian grinned, but his face fel when he saw shane's hur
t look. "Shane, what is it? Oh i know, it's bethany isn't it!"
Shane looked up at kian "What did you say?"
Kian spoke seriously "I know shane, you like bethany, don't you?"
Shane could barely speak "Kian..."
An angry voice interrupted them "So that's it! You want my girl!" Shane
spun round and saw mark, he looked hurt. Shane stood up and walked towar
ds him
"Mark, how could you think that?"
"It makes sense! Ever since she's been here, you've changed!"
"Mark! I don't want her!" He yelled and stormed off. Nicky saw the commo
tion and wanted to run after him, but his cellphone rang, annoyed he ans
wered "Hello! Oh hi g. Of course i'm looking forward to seeing you tonig
ht. Okay, bye sweetie, love you too" He ended the call and went to find
shane
Mark was worried about shane, he believed him about bethany, but somethi
ng was troubling him, he rushed off to find him.
Shane rushed into their dressing room and threw himself on the sofa, he
cried softly " God, first nicky, now i've drove mark away, and i haven't
even told anyone yet. I can't deny my feelings, but i can't face up to
them either"
Nicky finally found shane in the dressing room, he was sat on the couch,
he walked over to his troubled friend and placed a hand on his shoulder
Shane glanced up and saw nicky's blue eyes gazing down at him, he was
in a trance, staring into those beautiful ocean blue eyes, he broke the
longing gaze. Nicky spoke first
"Shay we're friends, if i can help you i will, but you need to let me in
"
Shane gazed at the floor "You can't help me nicky, so just go"
Nicky was hurt for about the 5th time that day and it showed. Shane look
ed up at nicky and felt his heart lurch, he hated seeing the wounded loo
k on his face. Nicky finally spoke "Erm..i'll go, but i need to know one
thing first" Shane noded as nicky continued "Well, we've been friends f
or a good while, and i need to know one thing, are we okay?" Shane gave
him a puzzled expression "I mean are we still friends shane? You push me
away, i feel as if the friendship means shit to you"
"We're still friends" He replied quietly. Just then, mark ran into the d
ressing room, shane looked at him and tensed. Nicky left as shane wished
He lingered outside, curious as to what was been discussed. He heard r
aised voices and decided to leave them to it. He walked back to join kia
n and bryan.
Mark ran over to shane. "About earlier mate, i didn't mean it shay"
Shane was silent and he looked at mark and spoke softly "I don't fancy h
er mark"
"Well, what's wrong mate"
"You wouldn't understand"
"Try me, come on shane! Talk to me buddy!"
"I.."
"Do you want a special someone in your life? Is that it?"
"Yes" He muttered
"Well...maybe i could ask bethany to ask one of her friends" He said wit
h a smile
"No, don't bother"
"Why not?"
"I won't like her"
"You haven't even met her yet! God shane!"
"That's not what i meant...she'd probably be a nice girl"
"What did you mean then?"
"I wouldn't be attracted to her, i'm not attracted to bethany and she's
a looker"
"So, she's probably not your type"
"Mark..."
"I'll ask bethany about her friends..." He babbled away
"Mark! shut up!"
"Sorry" He spoke softly, with a hurt look on his face
"Mark, thanks, but finding me a girl won't ease my problems.."
"Problems?"
"Erm...forget i said anything"
"No...has this got anything to do with nicky?"
"What do you mean?" He blushed, but hid it from mark
"Well, when he was here, he looked upset, actually he's been upset all d
ay. Have you fallen out?"
"No, probably pressure of the tour"
"Yeah, i guess, so you want a special someone, but you can't be bothered
to hook up with a girl"
"That's right mark" Hoping he's read between the lines
"Well, if you don't want a girl, what do you want? Aww mate, you miss yo
ur mum?"
Shane groaned "No! I mean of course i miss her, but i'm seeing her tomor
row night"
"Of course you are! I lost my head there! Shane you have to tell me what
you need, i can't play guessing games forever"
"If i tell you, it doesn't leave this room, okay?"
"I guess"
"No! You have to promise me mark!!" He said with urgency and fear in his
voice. Mark knew it was serious. "Okay, just tell me, you can trust me"
"You won't judge me?"
"Come on shane, we're best friends, no matter what okay?"
"Yeah, well here i go...i'm gay" He said it almost in a whisper.
"You're gay?" Mark replied smiling
"What's so funny?" Shane said slightly annoyed
"Shane, it's no big deal, so what you're gay, it doesn't change a thing
between us okay?"
"Thanks mark" He smiled, but it failed to reach his eyes
"How long have you known?"
"Well, i've always had an idea that i was gay, i felt drawn to guys, but
it dawned on me last night"
"So, who's the special someone?" he asked grinning
"I have no special someone" He replied flatly
"But, you have your eye on someone..right?"
"Yeah, but it's too complicated" He sighed
"Why?"
"Well, for a starter, he's straight...and spoken for"
"It's not me is it?" He asked half joking and half worried
"Ha! You wish!" They started laughing "Well, who is it? Nix?"
"What makes you say that?" He answered panicking
"It is! It's Nix!" He couldn't hide the grin
"Look, drop it!" Shane bellowed
"Who else knows?"
"Only you"
"Are you gonna tell nicky?"
"As if!! It'll ruin everything"
"You don't have to tell him *everything* but at least let him know about
you been gay"
"I'll try"
"Great! Now, we gotta rehearse! Before louis sends out a search party fo
r us" They grin and go back to the stage, kian and bry are messing aroun
d, nic and bethany are chatting.
"Finally!" Louis yells
"Sorry" Mark and shane say in unison. Nicky spots shane and smiles, shan
e returns the smile shyly. Nic's very pleased, he runs his hands through
his hair, shane wishes he could do that. Broken out of his daydream, lo
uis yells
"Come on shane! I need a runthrough of "flying wthout wings" and "season
s in the sun"
"Yes boss" Shane grins
They all take their places and shane starts to sing, with only one perso
n on his mind. As mark sings his part, shane sneaks a look at nicky, he
spots shane and grins, as does kian, not knowing what the joke is, but n
ot wanting to be excluded
Louis speaks softly, but sternly "Concentrate guys" They look ahead and
apologise silently. The song ends, then "seasons in the sun" starts. The
y sit on stools, the order goes bryan, kian, nicky, shane and mark. Kian
starts to sing beautifully as it echoes around the empty arena, as shan
e, mark and bryan sing their parts, nicky has a smile on his face, until
he starts to sing, heturns serious and concentrates "Goodbye michele...
" Shane looks at him as he sings his heart out, he can feel himself well
up as nicky's soulful voice floods the arena. Nicky looks at shane as h
e sings the last line, and sees tears in his eyes, shane just smiles as
he knows that nic will only worry. Then as the song finishes, louis tell
s them they can have a rest. Nicky called shane over
"Was my singing that bad?" He joked
"I don't follow"
"I noticed the tears in your eyes" He smiled
"Oh..busted" He grinned
"So was it bad?" He was clearly worried now
Shane noticed his anxious frown and reassured him "As if nicky, Your voi
ce is amazing, it got me quite emotional actually"
"Thanks shay" He blushed, and gave him a hug, shane wrapped his arms aro
und nicky's waist feeling content and secure. Nic released the hug and s
aw something in shane's eyes
"You alright mate?" He asked shane
"Well no, we need to talk"
"Okay, i'm all ears" He smiled
"Not here, it has to be private okay" He was shaking as he spoke
"Sounds heavy"
"It is" He muttered as they went to their dressing room. Nicky poured 2
drinks of pineapple juice, he handed one to shane, he avoided nicky's ga
ze as their fingers brushed
"What do you wanna talk about?" He sipped his ice cold beverage
"Firstly, i wanna apologise for being an ass today. You didn't deserve i
t at all"
"It's alright, forget about it"
"Easier said than done..there's something else"
"I'm listening"
"I'm gay" He mumbled under his breath
"Really?" He looked amazed
"Yeah, so you can leave now" He mumbled, praying he wouldn't hate him
"Why would i do that!"
Shane looked at him "Well, isn't it awkward been around me?"
"Why? Just because you're gay? You're still my best bud" He sat next to
shane on the couch, and rested his arm on shane's leg. Shane jumped up,
as nicky looked at him questionably
"Look nicky, you should just leave alright" Tears were filling his eyes
"No shane, what's wrong mate?" He placed his hnd on shane's shoulder, an
d he moved away again. "Shane, why are you so tense? You don't have to w
orry about anything" He added soothingly
"Just don't touch me alright!" He ordered
"Why?" He was getting upset too
"Cause i love you, that's why!!" He regretted the words as soon as they'
d left his mouth. Nicky slowly backed away "What?!!" He yelled
"You heard me" Shane spoke quietly
"Shit!...I have to go" He headed towards the door, shane rushed over to
him
"Nicky wait..." He was crying freely "No, please don't go" He pleaded wi
th him as he furiously wiped his hot painful tears away. Nicky just star
ed at him and spoke quietly "I have to go...I need to think" Shane took
a deep breath "We're still friends right?" Nicky nodded meekly"Yeah"
He ran out of the dressing room, shane cried out as he punched the wall,
the pain was nothing compared to the constant ache in his heart
"What have i done" He whispered. He glanced at his watch. it was 3 pm,
he needed to talk to someone, he needed mark
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Okay that was part 3, so do you like it or loath it? send any feedback to
caz.birch@uk.dreamcast.com