Requests for gifts with the fucking wedding invite.

HOW is this socially acceptable? How? Family and friends, Please join us as we celebrate our love and commit to spend our lives together. Enclosed is a list of things we would like you to buy us. 1000 times worse when the demand for gifts is in rhyming couplets.

My parents went through their attic recently and chucked out a set of garden furniture that was no use to anyone after disintegrating in an attic for over 40 years. They've never lived anywhere with a garden big enough to sit in.

Having a list is fine. It's the mentioning in the invitees what makes me clutch my pearls and I know makes my very proper grandmother spin in her grave. If guest want to know about the list they should ask bride/groom or their families.

I think asking for cash is the thing that gets more of a split between YABU and YANBU here.

The thing with a gift list is that (properly done) the list should include items as cheap as a tenner or even less along with more pricey bits.

No one would feel comfortable giving a fiver as a wedding gift, but if you're skint, you're skint. If a couple have asked for cash as a present then you're put in a horrid position. At least with a list you can choose from the cheaper end.

Most people will want to give you a gift, it's a given. If some people are grumpy about it, let them be, they are miserable bastards.Personally, I would want to make a gift that would make the bride and groom happy, if it's pans, a serving spoon or a contribution to something they are looking forward to that's great. I don't get the whole "Oh no, that's rude".

And of course no one would tell you in RL that something is rude, for that in itself would be appallingly rude. Silence does not indicate approval. And just because something is common does not make it right.

I would think it incredibly rude to go without a gift. I have never known someone go without anything.If you then ask the bride/groom or family they then have to go to all the trouble of having to post it. Most people are going to ask for a list so it is common sense to supply it. If you post 30 invitations that costs £15 and it will then cost another £15 to send a list. As long as you don't put in twee poems, or ask for money, I think it fine.

We didn't have a list or request money. We already owned our own home so had everything we needed, so it seemed tasteless. Quite different situation to when a list may have been helpful for young couples were moving in together for the first time.

Perfectly acceptable imo to include a gift list at a weddIng. If you don't you run the risk of multiple repeated gifts. Wedding lists are rather sensible and I've always appreciated seeing one, certainly nothing to swear about. I just don't get all the shock horror on mumsnet 're these lists as thumb said up thread it's only here that appears to have an issue.

Id rather give money than a gift and couldn't give a flying fuck if the request came in the form of a poem. Must assume op that you're not a friend of the person who invited you otherwise upon opening the invite you would have thought "oh how lovely, x and y are getting married". Not how dare they fucking expect s wedding gift at their wedding the greedy grabbing bastards. Some friend you are!!

The last 8 weddings I've been to ( including ours... 6 asked for contributions to honeymoon ( the normal request now) 1 asked for contributions to a new kitchen (they spent it on a car!) and my DB/DSIL didn't have a list and ended up with 34!!! Naff Silver wedding photo frames. She hates silver, totally not to their taste, they live in a small cottage with no free surfaces to put picture frames. The sad thing is you can tell that many of these frames cost a fortune! What a waste of money.

We asked for no gifts or money...just come to our wedding and celebrate with us. Guests spend enough on outfits and hotel bills. Seriously think the whole wedding gift thing is grabby and outdated. Most couple need nothing for their homes.