don't drink and drive!

That's the main rule right?! Well I'm adding a spin off to that one. Don't drink and grieve. Bad bad bad combination... I thought It would e nice to have a close friend come over and hang out with DH and I and have a few cold ones. Well that lead to a complete and emotional break down, hubby has managed to get a good few couple of glasses of water in me and I'm finally getting my head back. Feeling I never knew I had came out full throttle. There was no holding back... I couldn't I didn't have my protective barrier up, my disguise of being stable ripped right from underneath me, I didn't realize how much the hot topics board nasty comments about my donation post truly hurt and upset me. Now that I'm way more sober than I was 2 hours ago, I'm sitting in a hot bath reading through everyone's posts (great here come the water works again) and how happy I am for everyone's healthy new happy babies. Deep down inside I'm so jealous and wish that was me being able to post about my supply or the newest bump to the head. Looking at Addison's picture is getting harder and harder. One women on one of my threads posted a poem and it made me cry an so happy, ill repost it for everyone to read in a reply to this post. Ugh I wih I could beg to be in someone elses shoes right now but I can't ask for that because I don't want anyone of you in my place EVER! Not even my worst enemy, I would countless losses of that means even one of you ladies that has helped me through this keep your happy and health forever. Thanks for listening again.

That's the main rule right?! Well I'm adding a spin off to that one. Don't drink and grieve. Bad bad bad combination... I thought It would e nice to have a close friend come over and hang out with DH and I and have a few cold ones. Well that lead to a complete and emotional break down, hubby has managed to get a good few couple of glasses of water in me and I'm finally getting my head back. Feeling I never knew I had came out full throttle. There was no holding back... I couldn't I didn't have my protective barrier up, my disguise of being stable ripped right from underneath me, I didn't realize how much the hot topics board nasty comments about my donation post truly hurt and upset me. Now that I'm way more sober than I was 2 hours ago, I'm sitting in a hot bath reading through everyone's posts (great here come the water works again) and how happy I am for everyone's healthy new happy babies. Deep down inside I'm so jealous and wish that was me being able to post about my supply or the newest bump to the head. Looking at Addison's picture is getting harder and harder. One women on one of my threads posted a poem and it made me cry an so happy, ill repost it for everyone to read in a reply to this post. Ugh I wih I could beg to be in someone elses shoes right now but I can't ask for that because I don't want anyone of you in my place EVER! Not even my worst enemy, I would countless losses of that means even one of you ladies that has helped me through this keep your happy and health forever. Thanks for listening again.

My mom is a survivor,Or so I have heard it said.But I can hear her cryingWhen all others are in bed.I watch her lay awake at nightAnd go to hold her hand.She doesn’t know I’m with herTo help her understand.But like the sands upon the beachThat never wash away...i watch over my surviving mom,Who thinks of me each day.She wares a smile for others...A smile of disguise.But through heaven’s open doorI see tears flowing from her eyesMy mom tries to cope with my deathTo keep my memory alive.But to anyone who knows herKnows it’s her way to survive.As I watch over my surviving momThrough heaven’s open door...I try to tell herAngels protect me forevermore.I know that doesn’t help her...Or ease the burden she bears.So if you get a chance, talk to her...And show her that you care.For no matter what she says...No matter what she feels.My surviving mom has a broken heartThat time won’t ever heal.

My mom is a survivor,Or so I have heard it said.But I can hear her cryingWhen all others are in bed.I watch her lay awake at nightAnd go to hold her hand.She doesn’t know I’m with herTo help her understand.But like the sands upon the beachThat never wash away...i watch over my surviving mom,Who thinks of me each day.She wares a smile for others...A smile of disguise.But through heaven’s open doorI see tears flowing from her eyesMy mom tries to cope with my deathTo keep my memory alive.But to anyone who knows herKnows it’s her way to survive.As I watch over my surviving momThrough heaven’s open door...I try to tell herAngels protect me forevermore.I know that doesn’t help her...Or ease the burden she bears.So if you get a chance, talk to her...And show her that you care.For no matter what she says...No matter what she feels.My surviving mom has a broken heartThat time won’t ever heal.

ill be taking screen names and kicking a** in your honor my dear! they are just ugly people trying to make theirselves look important. no more alcohol for a bit I hope? the last thing you need is to binge and get alcohol poisoning. Addison wouldn't want that for u. thanks for adding me to instagram last night. if you need a friend to vent to just email me : redneckjuliet88@gmail.com.

ill be taking screen names and kicking a** in your honor my dear! they are just ugly people trying to make theirselves look important. no more alcohol for a bit I hope? the last thing you need is to binge and get alcohol poisoning. Addison wouldn't want that for u. thanks for adding me to instagram last night. if you need a friend to vent to just email me : redneckjuliet88@gmail.com.

Don't ever think your unwanted here. Do whatever you need to do to grieve the loss of your sweet baby girl. If you need us we are here always at least I know I am. Your story breaks my heart and I don't think anyone should question it and if they do don't post it and don't report your things. Be safe an stay strong. Xox

Don't ever think your unwanted here. Do whatever you need to do to grieve the loss of your sweet baby girl. If you need us we are here always at least I know I am. Your story breaks my heart and I don't think anyone should question it and if they do don't post it and don't report your things. Be safe an stay strong. Xox

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