May 2014

February 29, 2008

....No pun intended. Try as I might, I can not make March stay away any longer. I have tried hard to mentally push it back, but it is here, nonetheless. So many days in March will be marked with a huge dose of reality. March 6 is the last day I heard Roger's voice speak to me. March 7, he went into ICU. March 10 was his birthday. March 17 will be the anniversary of his Homegoing. March 21 and 24 were the dates of his memorial services (one in TN, one in AR). I can't believe, in some ways, that it has already been a year. In other ways, it feels like a lifetime. But, as sad as it makes me to be without him, I can't help but be joyful that he is where he is now, at peace, and healthy, and living with the One he sang, played and lived for!

February 14, 2008

Happy Valentine's Day to everyone. This is a hard one for me, my first without a valentine in many, many years. Of course, it never was about the day itself, so it's not really any different from most days.

I confess to having had a lot of "down" days recently. I guess it's just the time of year...thinking about all of the last "lasts". It's almost the day marking the last time Roger went into the hospital, and of course, his birthday and one-year anniversary of his death are just around the corner. I think a big part of it, too, is that it feels like once the 1-year mark has passed, it's just too far gone.....do the memories now start to fade? Will I be able to remember them as clearly? Just some panicky feelings in the middle of the night (or day) that leave me feeling confused. I know it probably sounds a little crazy to anyone who hasn't been there, but I am guessing that there are many of you who can relate exactly to what I am trying to put into words.

February 07, 2008

This will be just a very quick note to say we are all safe here in our neck of the woods, following the severe weather and tornadoes of a couple of days ago. It was a very long night, but God protected us. Our family in Arkansas is safe, as well.

Everyone's health is good right now in our household, too. And, I received word yesterday that I have been accepted as a new courier for the National Bone Marrow Donor Association. I attend training on March 14 in Minneapolis, MN, and I am VERY excited and grateful for this opportunity! I will keep you updated when I know more about the program.

Gotta run, there is a cat trying to get in my lap and onto this keyboard.

What I'm Reading Right Now

Ron Mehl: What God Whispers in the NightRon Mehl is a hero that I never met. A friend gave me this book a couple of years ago and it really touched me. Ron was suffering with Leukemia and had written several wonderful books before this one "Whispers" really got to me. The main thought is why is it that God who IS light, who created light, does so much of his work in the dark? The answer, because that's where WE are. We struggle in darkness, our weakness is more pronounced in the darkness and we feel so alone in our darkness. But....God is not intimidated by the dark! He invades it and speaks to us there!
You should read this book asap. (*****)