"Okay, sure. When does your husband get off from work ? Also, here's $20 for pizza and a movie. Don't come back to pick him up too soon. If there's still a tie on the front door, circle the block a couple times first."

My father (poor man) has been the only male in the house for lets see... 31 years? People asked him ALL THE TIME when he was going to "give my mom a son" (eww.) So he would tell them this story (feel free to steal and rewrite/modify to suit)

One day while he was walking down the beach after a regatta, he kicked something in the sand. When he bent over to pick it up, he found a metal object which he rubbed to clean off and out popped a genie. The genie said he was kind of tired, but was willing to grant my dad one wish- and so dad wished to always be surrounded by beautiful women. He finished by saying "Be careful what you wish for"

The story length and description was also tailored to the rudeness of the statement- the ruder the statement the longer and more elaborate it became.

I need to tell that story to my Dad, the proud father of 4 daughters and no sons. He always says that they have male pets so he has some male company.

A friend of mine recently announced she was pregnant with baby number 3. She already has 2 boys. It took all of 2 minutes before someone asked if she hoped it was a girl. People just can't seem to help themselves.

I suspect that if we try for a third we'll get that a lot. DH and ai have agreed that we won't put a third on the table until we are 100% certain we want a third child and are not just trying for a girl. I admit I cried a little when I found out my baby-to-be was another boy, I'd dreamed of a daughter for a long time. However, I'm so excited that ODS will have a little brother so close in age, plus the baby boy I already have is amazing and I know this one will be too.

My neighbor came over tonight with this gem. She was at her DS's ( baseball practice tonight with her DD (4). Another lady sat down and struck up a conversation that went south quickBaseball Lady (BL) : Hi, is your son playing? My nephew is on teamNeighbor Lady (NL) : YesBL : Is that your DD? (pointing to her DD playing in the grass)NL : YesBL : Do you have any others?NL : No, this is all (she had 2 miscarriages between kids)BL : You need to have more !NL: No, we're fine, ty. DH & I are happy and this works for us.BL: (grabbing NL's hands) : No, you need to pray because if you pray you will have moreNL: (an atheist now scrambling to politely get away) : No, this really is the size family we are financially comfortable with tyBL : NO no no, Deity will provide everything, just pray for more, you need to have more.NL : Ummm...I have to take DD to the bathroom, good bye (practically running away)

Some people just feel the need to push their beliefs and won't take any other answer.

You want girls? Come, join us in the dark field of environmental consulting. We're not sure if it's the exposure to the chemicals or what, but out of the last 20 or so babies in the office, we've had two, maybe three boys. It's become the office joke: Oh, you're having a baby? What are you going to name her? You are merely evening out the balance of things with all boys.

I suspect that if we try for a third we'll get that a lot. DH and ai have agreed that we won't put a third on the table until we are 100% certain we want a third child and are not just trying for a girl. I admit I cried a little when I found out my baby-to-be was another boy, I'd dreamed of a daughter for a long time. However, I'm so excited that ODS will have a little brother so close in age, plus the baby boy I already have is amazing and I know this one will be too.

When I was pregnant with my first, I wanted a boy but was thrilled when my girl came along (we waited to find out at the birth). With my son, we found out at the scan he was a boy, and I cried a little. I loved the idea of two girls who could be close friends. Of course now that he's here I adore my little boy and he and his sister are great friends (long may it last!).

Being from a family with just one boy and one girl, I always envied people who had siblings of the same sex because I wasn't very close to my brother as a child. I mostly just found him annoying

You want girls? Come, join us in the dark field of environmental consulting. We're not sure if it's the exposure to the chemicals or what, but out of the last 20 or so babies in the office, we've had two, maybe three boys. It's become the office joke: Oh, you're having a baby? What are you going to name her? You are merely evening out the balance of things with all boys.

That's funny! When I announced to a few friends at church that I am having a girl, they said I'm working to even out the balance. Aparently the town we live in now is overrun with boys!

This is along the same lines of what I say. We have four boys and when I was pregnant with #4, almost everyone we knew said they were hoping we had a girl or asked if I was hoping for a girl. Some even said they were so disappointed when they heard it was a boy again! Whenever anyone asks me now if I want to try for a girl, I just say that if I ever feel like I need another girl in the house I'll make sure any pets we adopt are female. They usually laugh and that's the end of it.

You know, some people just get stuck on "balance". Go out to eat with people and ask somebody to pass the salt. Even though you specify salt some people feel compelled to pass the pepper with the salt because an incomplete set just doesn't make sense.

I used to only pass the requested one until I was taught that good etiquette dictates that you pass them both.

Being from a family with just one boy and one girl, I always envied people who had siblings of the same sex because I wasn't very close to my brother as a child. I mostly just found him annoying

I am female and I don't get along with the sister that is closest in age to me. I think it's a gamble on whether the siblings will get along no matter what gender they are. I think people who do get along with their siblings tend to think that it must be that way for everyone (a pretty human thing - to think your experiences are universal) and people who don't might think "if only X we would have been friends". A co-worker once told me that people who have only one child are selfish because they are denying their kid a best friend. He was very close to his brother. I told him that I wasn't close to any of my siblings and he dropped the subject. I doubt I really changed his mind though.

Whatever works for you is what is perfect, although I can understand the desire to have at least one of each. Personally I don't have any kids and don't want them so I don't have a dog in this fight.

You know, some people just get stuck on "balance". Go out to eat with people and ask somebody to pass the salt. Even though you specify salt some people feel compelled to pass the pepper with the salt because an incomplete set just doesn't make sense.

I used to only pass the requested one until I was taught that good etiquette dictates that you pass them both.

I think someone made that one up -- probably because they were uncomfortable with the "imbalance." I can't imagine that good etiquette requires you to ignore someone's specific request. If they wanted salt and pepper, they can ask for both.

Logged

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

I'm childfree by choice but these questions make me so angry on your behalf! I'd go with one of these two replies:

"If you forgive me for not answering, I'll forgive you for asking such a highly personal and inappropriate question."

"What an interesting question. I take it you think my family is somehow "incomplete" and lacking in some way based on such a statement. Well, I'm afraid to disappoint you but we're doing just fine and I don't need any suggestions or encouragement from you or anyone else on family planning matters. So please do me a favor and don't ask me about my reproductive activities and I won't ask you about yours. M'kay?"

Would it be okay to say the bolded with a completely straight face and without irony? With apologies to the o/p for a slight bunny trail, my husband and I are getting licensed to start foster parenting and I've actually had people ask if it's because we can't get pregnant. I've usually just been avoiding the question, but I've been toying privately with the idea of using something like the bolded as a stronger reply.

I'm childfree by choice but these questions make me so angry on your behalf! I'd go with one of these two replies:

"If you forgive me for not answering, I'll forgive you for asking such a highly personal and inappropriate question."

"What an interesting question. I take it you think my family is somehow "incomplete" and lacking in some way based on such a statement. Well, I'm afraid to disappoint you but we're doing just fine and I don't need any suggestions or encouragement from you or anyone else on family planning matters. So please do me a favor and don't ask me about my reproductive activities and I won't ask you about yours. M'kay?"

Would it be okay to say the bolded with a completely straight face and without irony? With apologies to the o/p for a slight bunny trail, my husband and I are getting licensed to start foster parenting and I've actually had people ask if it's because we can't get pregnant. I've usually just been avoiding the question, but I've been toying privately with the idea of using something like the bolded as a stronger reply.

I think it would be better to save the bolded for when someone is being really pushy and rude, as in they won't drop the subject even though you've deflected several times and also said, "We want to be foster parents because we think it's an important way to give back to underprivileged children in our community," or whatever reason you have that you're comfortable sharing.

Congrats on doing it, by the way! My mom worked in child services for many years and good foster parents are a treasure.