Friday, April 13, 2012

On having ALL boys...

I always said I wanted a girl someday, I NEEDED a girl. I feel differently now. Truly I do! It's not that I would never want a girl. I guess, God knew me better. :) I am good with boys. My girls would be frazzled messes and I would likely be broke from all of the clothing I would buy them! :)

So if you're knew to my blog and coming over to visit from Kelly's Korner....HELLO! :) A snipit of our children situation for you...

We have 3 boys ages 1, 3 and 5. We adopted each of them at different ages...well, that's not entirely true. We are in the process of adopting the 2 youngest, therefor I am unable to post pictures or names of those boys until our adoptions are finalized. However, we adopted our oldest, Tate at birth. We have an open adoption with his most amazing birth family. You can read about our adoption story on the right sidebar if you wish. And someday in the next 5 or 6 months, I will be able to post about our 2 newest additions. Looking forward to that day!

Anyway, back to my thoughts on having boys...

I don't have girls (obviously!), so I can't really say that I fully know what I am talking about here. However, I feel like it's more acceptable or almost expected for a boy to be messy and disheveled moreso than a girl...and frankly, my kids are all quite disheveled! As a matter of fact, so am I! Ha. :) It's strange, I kinda like it that way...most of the time. I mean, there is a time and place for combed hair and clean, unstained clothes and clipped, clean fingernails and washed faces. Those times and places are rare in our family, but I believe there is a time and place nonetheless.

I know that God gave me boys for a reason. I believe as years go by, that reason will become more and more clear, but for now it's pretty wonderful having my 3 little Mama's boys who love playing in the dirt and wrestling on the floor with their daddy.

And I just am not one of those hovering moms who will be worried about them getting their clothes dirty or tearing their pants or getting dirt in their hair...I'm just not. So if I had a girl, I just am unsure people would turn the other cheek as readily. Maybe they'd be more likely to give a look of disgust or shake their heads...or maybe I am just paranoid and care WAY too much what people think (something I must work on for sure) and so I am just telling myself this. :) No matter if it's in my head or if it is fact, I would worry about that.

Also, I don't WANT to have to worry about them being put together and their hair being done and worry about their clothes and painting nails and what not. I am busy enough just having 3 little ones to worry about all that other stuff! I like being layed back about that stuff. Trust me, I love girly clothes and doing hair and makeup (I am a cosmetologist for crying out loud!), but it would lose it's appeal quickly if I had to do it on my daughter(s) every day. It loses it's appeal when I have to do it to myself! :)

I also have this little vision of bringing my boys to the Iowa Hawkeye football games each year, cheering on our team, watching the boys throw a football around with their dad. Not that girls can't do those things, but I remember being a young girl and it certainly wasn't on my list of priorities to watch football. And Sean and I LOVE football...it's what we do in the fall, so our kids will likely be doing that with us.

Maybe more than anything at all, I know how I was as a teenager. Wow...I put my parents through hell. I was mean and disrespectful and hormonal and caddy and, well...a girl! I would not do well with a daughter if she were anything like I was as a teenager...it could get bad! The thought of that scares me...a lot!

Only God knows why I don't have a daughter and maybe He will surprise us with one someday, but I will leave that up to Him. Because we chose to grow our family through the blessing of adoption, we have had the ability to make the decision of the sex of our children, but we have chosen to leave that decision to God. And as all of us know...HE knows best, His plans are perfect. I remember one time saying that there is no way I won't have a daughter someday, I wouldn't let that happen. That was back when I thought I had some control in my life and now I know I do not and I've said it time and time again...I am SO GRATEFUL that His plans have not been my own because my life would be a mess and so much less fullfilling if things had gone the way I had planned.

4 comments:

I am so glad I found your blog through Kelly's SUYL! I love your story and I feel the same way about my boys! I just LOVE being a mom to these crazy two guys...they are so much fun! God knew better than me too...I always thought I would be a "girly" mom and that couldn't be further from the truth! We are in the process of adopting from Ethiopia now and I love connecting with other adoptive mamas too! So glad I found your blog! Jenny :)

God does seem to know best! Although I don't have any sons and was blessed with three beautiful little girls I wouldn't want it any other way either:) I LOVE your little boys SO much...just like if they were my own!

Right on...I could have written a lot of what you said. I don't think I will ever be sick of being a mom to boys...God is Good...he knows what he is doing! I've always said I was thankful God blessed me with boys and my sister with girls! Katie

About Me

I have been married to my wonderful husband, Sean since 2004 and welcomed our amazing son Tate into our family through the blessing of adoption in 2006. We then added two more incredible boys, Wesley and Cason to our family through the blessing of adoption in October 2012. My life as a wife and mother is a challenging one, but the one I've always dreamed of.

Contact Me

Our 3 Blessings from God

We struggled to start a family until God opened our eyes to the blessing of adoption. We have been blessed with 3 boys who grew in my heart!

Tate Kenneth (8)

Our little Tater Tot is our first child. Adopted at birth, he changed our world and lives in more ways than we could have dreamed. He is so smart and makes us laugh every day! Timid and sensitive while also a little wild and crazy sometimes, he is the best of both worlds! He is passionate, competitive and sensitive. He makes us so proud every day. He loves his brothers and we are so proud of the big brother they have to look up to.

Wesley Xander (5)

Our middle boy, Wesley brings constant energy to our family! He loves fully and has a personality like no other child we've ever met. He has gone through more in his short life than many will go through in entire lifetime, but you would never know. Strong and willful, loving and curious...gorgeous beyond words! Wesley is not one that people forget, he won't let you. He keeps us busy and we love that we get to be his mommy and daddy forever!

Cason Stewart (3)

Our baby. Cason is the happiest, sweetest little boy alive. He has a way of making any person who comes in contact with him, fall completely head over heels in love. He is snuggly and sensitive. He had our hearts from the moment we laid eyes on him when he was 11 months old. We knew he was going to bless our lives and change our world in ways we had never dreamed before meeting him. He suffered a lot in his first year of life and we get to spend the rest of our lives making up for what he had to endure. A blessing beyond words.

The Joy of Open Adoption

Our Open Adoption Story

Read HERE the story of how we have been blessed with an amazing, open adoption.