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The Vegan occupation

Something has been happening under our very noses: colonists from the Vegan star system some 25 light years away have been slowly infiltrating our planet. They kept a low profile at first, but now they openly self-identify. There are more and more of them; they even have their own restaurants, and even establishments specializing in normal human food now offer Vegan dishes. The great mystery is how they have managed such a successful migration from such a great distance.

One possibility is that they began their journey thousands of years ago, and are only now arriving, but I don’t favor that. Vega is a massive star which is only about a tenth as old as the sun. They’re not that smart. Besides, immigrants generally are assimilated by the second or third generation, and these have held on to their ethnic cuisine much longer than that.

The only answer is quantum entanglement. Which means that somewhere on their home planet orbiting Vega, there is a box in which is an identical group of people, living in identical houses, and eating the same gluten-free unfried falafel wraps, drinking the same double venti no-whip soy lattes.

You can figure out for yourself the implications of that. For their environment at home to be identical to the one here on Earth, there must be identical humans there. Which means they have cloned us. Or are we the clones? How would we know?

Why, you may ask, would they do this? Because Vega will last only a tenth as long as the sun, that’s why. Vegans are apparently quite prudent, and are slowly replacing us with themselves, so as not to be left without a home.

I am posting this on my blog, because I don’t believe they know I’m on to them yet. But just in case I’m too late, they’ll find they’re not the only prudent ones. I have appended a copy of this post to the end of the iTunes EULA agreement.