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So, how is that naughty old Pope doing in the run-up to Christmas? A busy time of year what with all those presents to wrap and cards to write. Well, not too damn well, if reports are to believed. He’s even started using a moving platform to get to Mass. No, don’t laugh. No, don’t. That would be wicked. No, really, stop. It’s not funny. You’ll only set us off.

‘I was struck by what appeared to me as the decline in Benedict’s strength and health over the last half year,’ said one Rabbi David Rosen, who sat next to him at the Assisi interfaith gig or a Britney concert or an All-Male Burlesque or somesuch.

‘He looks thinner and weaker… which made the effort he put into the Assisi shindig with the extraordinary degree of personal attention to the attendees all the more remarkable,’ he went on.

Shindig?! Is that the sort of language you’d expect from someone holding the popcorn and stashing the hip flask for Egg Benedict? Honestly, people! Some decorum, please.

We wish him the very best. Actually, on second thoughts, no we don’t.

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At this festive time of the year, thoughts naturally turn to Bad Santa himself, Pope Benedict. Wonder if he has the Christmas spirit..., 9.5 out of 10 based on 2 ratings