That's it. I lasted about 48 minutes into the new season. I can't take the commentary and the overall presentation anymore. It's all so childish and bland. LPGA is for little girls. I mean little. A ten-year-old would probably roll her eyes at this sort of babyish crap.

The human race is just a chemical scum on a moderate-sized planet, orbiting around a very average star in the outer suburb of one among a hundred billion galaxies

LPGA is coming at you live on primetime from Australia. That's right. Tune in for the next three nights at 9 or 10 EST on the "golf" channel.

Listen I love LPGA literally more than anyone else on this site, but I really wish the NIH or whatever would do some research into ladies' tournament golf as a treatment for insomnia. (I am not joking or even half-joking here. At most this is like 10% joke, the rest I am quite serious about.)

I realize that Big Pharma is probably sending someone over right now to rub me out, but let me tell you, this is a sound idea. Late Nights with LPGA is so soothing. It lulls me in. I think the way it works, is that the content is interesting enough for me to engage with and get absorbed in, and then from there the general blandness of the whole presentation, the uninteresting banter, the volume level of the commentator's voices, long quiet gaps between golf shots etc. take over and make the eyelids feel heavy, slow down the heart rate etc.

The human race is just a chemical scum on a moderate-sized planet, orbiting around a very average star in the outer suburb of one among a hundred billion galaxies

Just before the final group struck their balls, the usually lighthearted Aussie TV commentator got serious for a moment. "This is not just another tour event. This means something to us. This is... our national open."

The human race is just a chemical scum on a moderate-sized planet, orbiting around a very average star in the outer suburb of one among a hundred billion galaxies

This week the LPGA coming at you live from Thailand. The land of vertical smiles, or so they say. This one is a real test of LPGA fandom. 1-5am ET coverage. I might get to see a half hour tops before dozing off.

The human race is just a chemical scum on a moderate-sized planet, orbiting around a very average star in the outer suburb of one among a hundred billion galaxies