Frankie Peanuts Deck!

Ever wish you could just make your opponent stop doing things and let you get on with your gameplan? Looking for a way to win without dealing combat damage? Do you like making your opponent play guessing games more than actually playing Magic? Well, I’ve got a treat for you guys today. One of my silver-bordered decks!

If that term is lost on you, fear not, as the pool of players who remember opening Unhinged packs is shrinking, and rarer still is the grizzled vet who can recount an Unglued draft. For
those not in the know, Unglued and Unhinged are non-tournament legal expansions filled with cards that Wizards felt could never see print otherwise. Many of the best designs have come out of Unglued and Unhinged design, and some effects have even made their way onto black bordered cards (looking at you, Barren Glory.)

NOTE THAT SOME OF THESE ARE NOT TOURNAMENT LEGAL CARDS. At least, the ones that have silver borders, as opposed to the black or white ones you will see on some cards in this deck, and more commonly on Magic cards themselves.

But enough about Unglued and Unhinged, how about a decklist? Meet Frankie Peanuts:

If you’re confused about how this deck actually goes about winning (short of a slow clock of Cheatyfaces,) don’t worry, the draw of playing this deck is you get to feel clever explaining how it works. There’s a lot going on, but the winning cards are Frankie Peanuts and either Staying Power, or Mirror Gallery (in which case you need a second copy of Frankie on the field.) You see, there’s a reason Frankie Peanuts is Legendary, and it has more to do with it than his questionable background in organized crime. You see, a clever wordsmith can craft a question like, “will you answer ‘yes’ to my next question?” If you happen to get another trigger out of Frankie Peanuts before the effect binding them to their answer ends (either by making effects no longer end with staying power, or getting a second trigger that turn,) you can then simply ask your opponent to concede (or not to concede, if they said no.) I’m sure there’s a joke here about making an offer your opponent can’t refuse.

To help set up the combo, you have the incredible tutor engine that is Urza’s Hot Tub + No-Name Mcgee. Just set his name to whatever you wish you had, and for 2 mana the dream comes true. Don’t have a no-name card in hand? Use the name changing ability while it’s in your library to the least valuable card currently in your hand, add 2 mana and poof, you’re ready to tutor for what your really need. Reito Lantern provides redundency against removal, since you can easily tutor up anything with enough mana. Mask of the Mimic is a way to leverage any shapeshifters you might feel the need to play at any point in the game.

Now, all this is very complicated, and you will likely have to explain everything in the above 2 paragraphs pretty much every time you play the deck. So, as long as you’re confusing them, why not mess with their head with Liar’s Pendulum and My First Tome? Hopefully you’ll at least distract them long enough to sneak a Cheatyface into play or pop the Kami of False Hope while Staying Power is on board. Plus, if you’re a good liar, the cheap card draw will drive you toward your combo.

Speaking of Staying Power, I mentioned you could lock your opponent out of the game, and Staying Power is what makes it work. Creatures got you down? Fog ’em with Kami of False Hope (or Holy Day, etc.) Oppenent’s burn spells making you feel the heat? Seht’s Tiger will cool them off. Just don’t want to lose? Angel’s Grace is stupid when the effect doesn’t end. Want to be a total jerk and just play solitaire Magic while your opponent watches? Silence.

This is a great deck if you’re looking to win via an angle few people would think of. While you definitely shouldn’t sleeve this up for a tournament (you’ll get laughed at, trust me) I could see a variation on the Staying Power lock managed with Isochron Scepter. You’ll need a new win condition if you go that way though.