DAKOTA SMITH, RYAN'S HOPEWHAT? Johnny Ryan has an illegitimate son named Dakota? This just can't be true, you say? Ahhh, but it is and you're rightfully shocked -- but not as shocked as Maeve Ryan will be when she find out. Who in their wildest dreams would have guessed that years ago, Johnny Ryan committed an adulterous act with a woman named Meg Smith? Okay, so Johnny was going through some hard times back then -- he wasn't doing well financially and he was hitting the bottle. That wasn't any reason to turn his affections toward another woman while his loving, trusting and faithful wife, Maeve, was over in Ireland visiting the folks, was it? Well, Johnny did and now Dakota is in the picture. He has already fallen in love with Jill Ryan and is about to enter the other Ryans' lives -- you can bet that things will never be the same.

WORST WEDDING

CASSIE & ROB CORONAL, ONE LIFE TO LIVEA touch of crass was the distinguishing feature of Llanview's eyesore wedding. In a frightening combination of the sexy and the virginal, the bride, Cassie Callison Coronal, wore what was touted as an Elizabethan wedding gown, but certain accessories seemed to come from a wedding cake -- a semicircular headdress made of cardboard and doilies -- and the bodice pushed up the bride's breasts for a bursting, Dolly Parton effect.

The competitive mother of the bride, Dorian Lord Callison, vied with her daughter for the WRONG award. In a garish, flourescent, big blue costume, Ms. Lord tied her hair with a chintzy scarf popularized by classy dames like Madonna. The other guests and friends of the family looked like they couldn't decide to dress for a wedding or for grocery shopping.