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Tuesday, 2 February 2016

20 Worst Films of 2015

2015 has been gone for over a month, and I've finally taken the opportunity to compile the films I disliked in descending order. So, these are my worst films of 2015.

Expect a best films of 2015 list later in the week.

Dishonourable Mentions

*Joy, a well acted mess of a film.
*The Falling, an admirable attempt which gets lost, becoming inscrutable and messy.
*Hyena, a stylish crime thriller as stylish as it is dull, containing stellar acting and excessive violence.
*Me and Earl and The Dying Girl, a lacking attempt done much more effectively in better films. The forced quirks, dime store philosophy and foreign cinema name-dropping especially miss their marks.
*Frozen Fever, a lazy attempt to capitalize on the success of the 2013 Disney film.

Ted 2 joins the likes of numerous comedy sequels which exist to capitalize on their predecessors success, rather than delivering a funny story worth watching, or even justifying it's existence. After this and A Million Ways to Die in the West, the future isn't bright for any future directing projects from MacFarlane.

A well intentioned drama that unfortunately comes off as a desperate plea for Oscar recognition, only more dull and forgettable. It's saddening when Eddie Redmayne delivers a performance that's less preferable to that he gave in Jupiter Ascending.

18. Circle

An intriguing concept has 50 people trapped in one room, selecting one person to die regularly until only one survives. Unfortunately, the directing duo fails to deliver, as repetition takes regularly hold, the film stretches itself over too many characters, each with paper-thin development and lacking screentime. A couple of interesting turns occur, but they don't make up for the lacklustre material.

Goodnight Mommy portrays an interesting tale sluggishly, making a torturous experience to view before becoming another round of torture porn. Sadly, it's just another film to add to the column of "films with missed potential".

For a film which built a reputation for it's raunchy content, it's a shame the result is unexciting, to the point of inducing sleep. At the end of the day, Fifty Shades of Grey is indeed a promotion of abuse, towards any poor soul that's unfortunate enough to see this film.

There's a good story worth telling about Rockstar Games, their creation of Grand Theft Auto, and the many controversies which they've encountered. Unfortunately, The Gamechangers is more like an example of what not to do.

In an avalanche of superhero adaptations, Fantastic Four manages to stand out due to its poor quality. After four lacklustre attempts at bringing these characters to the big screen, perhaps it's clear what the next option should be. Sell the characters to Marvel, where they'll hopefully receive the same redemption Daredevil was granted.

If you've wondered what it'd be like to combined A Million Ways To Die In The West with repeated hammer blows to the head, then you'd be close with The Ridiculous 6. The result is another paid vacation and vanity project for Adam Sandler, because that's deserving for the guy who casts his wife as a character named Never Wears Bra.

The Divergent Series: Insurgent takes any goodwill left from its predecessor, and crushes it into the ground. The inability to stand apart remains this films biggest weakness, which is ironic considering the protagonist aims to do just that.

There isn't much in Mortdecai that's actually deserving of praise. The characters lack in any likeable traits, the humor isn't there and the proceedings manage to be eye-rollingly dull. All that can be taken away from this film is the staggering amount of importance placed upon moustaches.

9. Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

Yes, the Syfy channel released ANOTHER Sharknado film, and it's akin to somebody telling the same joke for a third time, where it's sickening to witness repeated and want no more of it. The result can be simplified as a haven for failed "talents" to get killed by poorly CG'd sharks, with product placement on show. But if you want to see a shark get killed with a selfie stick, this is the film for you.

8. The Cobbler

When the credits rolled, I only had one thing to say: "What the fuck did I just watch?". Adam Sandler combined forces with acclaimed director Tom McCarthy, to deliver what can, at best, be labelled poorly written tripe. Half-baked elements of drama, goofy comedy and thriller are combined with syrupy attempts at emotion, to deliver an uneven whole. A baffling attempt that doesn't even seem sure of itself.

In the process of bringing his hit TV series to the big screen, Doug Ellin has crafted a shallow film with no real focus, and tries covering it up with pointless cameos. Entourage is an experience bearing little joy, and hopefully the true end to Vincent Chase and his cohorts.

6. Get Hard

At first, it looks as though Etan Coen's directorial debut will take aim at the racial and classist prejudices society gets stuck with, Instead, we get an avalanche of lazy clichés, gay panic in abundance, and the default setting for humour set at "rape jokes". What a waste of two talented performers.

It'd be more appropriate had the film been named Terminator Genitals, as it's a load of bollocks. The fifth instalment of the once popular franchise seems to be focused on bringing it to the modern day, as opposed to delivering good writing, an interesting plot or acting worth remembering. The result leaves Terminator Genisys as a soulless mess which slowly drains 2 hours of your life away.

The combination of Cohen's bland direction, Curry's poor script and the mistreatment of one key scene, leaves The Boy Next Door as little more than a waste of time. What's left is a curious amalgamation of clunky stereotypes, that fails to even offer up campy thrills.

Accidental Love is a perfect example for why some unfinished products should remain that way. One could attribute these troubles to the behind the scenes problems, but that leaves the question if the film had any viable material in the first place. Regardless, the end result comes off as amateurish toss that's been crafted without a clue. Throughout a runtime of 1 hour 40 minutes, this film fails to get a single thing right.

Pixels is a lazy excuse for a film, utilizing the nostalgic value of classic characters as an attempt to cover up the horrible writing, bored performances and misogyny on play here. This film is not worth your hard earned coins. The most it's worth is a flaming bag of excrement, nailed to the front door of Adam Sandler.

Tom Six has made The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence) a uniquely meta film, by having viewers swallow copious amounts of shit, akin to the centipedes unwilling participants. Let's face it, nobody expects a well written film to Sidney Lumet standards, or anything close to masterful character development. Yet, it's a surprise how things get so trashy, tasteless and puerile, leaving you in requirement of a shower.

Disagree/Agree with my choices? Be sure to voice your opinions in the comments below.