my entire second pregnancy was a PITA, pulled the muslces in my lower abdomen around 6 months, and of course they wouldn't heal while baby is still in there stretching away. I couldn't turn over in bed on my own, and you never think of the muscles needed to go from standing still to walking, that was the most painful part of it, just starting to walk.. afterwards I thought I'd be better, but then I got an infection THANK YOU MR DOCTOR OR MISS NURSE WHO CAN'T FUCKING WASH YOUR HANDS!

It was pretty miserable, so I can sympathize with the post birthing experience being anything but beautiful.

My approach going into labor was I would try to go without an epidural but if I felt I needed it I would ask. So far I've had three unmedicated births, one epidural. The epidural I got with my third because I thought it was going to be my last kid and I was curious. It was...interesting, but I really didn't enjoy the recovery. A lot of back pain and just feeling off. However, all of my births were all extremely fast (3 hours and under except for the very last one which was 5 hours) so I'm sure that's why. If I was going through hours of back labor I'm sure I wouldn't hesitate to ask for an epidural either.

If we have another, I'm actually going to bypass the hospital altogether- with each birth I left before my minimum number of days I could stay because the beds are uncomfortable and nurses are coming in every couple hours to take vitals or someone else is coming in to check this or that and I wasn't getting any rest at all. I'm going for a home/water birth next time...if there even is a next time lol.

Considering i dont have kids and have never had an epidural, i dont know how long the needle is, i threw out an arbitrary number because i'd heard the needle is huge.

Nice way to throw in a "creative" dig about my weight, but for the record im not so big that they would need a longer needle.

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I've seen pictures of you, you're not morbidly obese... I was thinking of those tubs of lard that need cranes to get out of bed. Or the ones that require specially-built hospital operating tables. Not that you do anything medical to those people, might as well shoot them in the head for the risk it is to do stuff to them.
And yeah they don't show you the needle. Lean over, feel them cleaning the area, little prick, and done.

Considering i dont have kids and have never had an epidural, i dont know how long the needle is, i threw out an arbitrary number because i'd heard the needle is huge.

Nice way to throw in a "creative" dig about my weight, but for the record im not so big that they would need a longer needle.

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I've seen pictures of you, you're not morbidly obese... I was thinking of those tubs of lard that need cranes to get out of bed. Or the ones that require specially-built hospital operating tables. Not that you do anything medical to those people, might as well shoot them in the head for the risk it is to do stuff to them.
And yeah they don't show you the needle. Lean over, feel them cleaning the area, little prick, and done.

Considering i dont have kids and have never had an epidural, i dont know how long the needle is, i threw out an arbitrary number because i'd heard the needle is huge.

Nice way to throw in a "creative" dig about my weight, but for the record im not so big that they would need a longer needle.

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I've seen pictures of you, you're not morbidly obese... I was thinking of those tubs of lard that need cranes to get out of bed. Or the ones that require specially-built hospital operating tables. Not that you do anything medical to those people, might as well shoot them in the head for the risk it is to do stuff to them.
And yeah they don't show you the needle. Lean over, feel them cleaning the area, little prick, and done.

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Its all good, that's what i get for posting at 4 am when i should be asleep lol

Considering i dont have kids and have never had an epidural, i dont know how long the needle is, i threw out an arbitrary number because i'd heard the needle is huge.

Nice way to throw in a "creative" dig about my weight, but for the record im not so big that they would need a longer needle.

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I've seen pictures of you, you're not morbidly obese... I was thinking of those tubs of lard that need cranes to get out of bed. Or the ones that require specially-built hospital operating tables. Not that you do anything medical to those people, might as well shoot them in the head for the risk it is to do stuff to them.
And yeah they don't show you the needle. Lean over, feel them cleaning the area, little prick, and done.

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Little prick? Uh no. More like a SWORD being stabbed into your back.

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Having had 10 of them in my back... if they numb the area well you it will still hurt but nothing near to when the doctor Fucks up like on my 9th one and didn't numb it enough. It seriously felt like someone trying to shove a un-sharpened pencil into my spinal nerve! My normal doctor could't to the epidural so he recommended this other guy .... MISTAKE!

Nope, my epidural was super easy, barely felt it. Again, probably up to everyone's pain tolerance at the time, as well! I wasn't in labor when I had mine done, planned c-section, so I was huge, I just wanted to get it over with...

With the twins I had the epidural but I had been in the hospital for 7 weeks already so I was use to being poked and prodded alot. With the youngest there was no time she was born within 30 minutes of getting in the room.

The best thing is what is good for both mom and baby, alot of women will say to wait on the epidural and then find they have labored past the point of being able to get one. A good doctor/midwife will go through a complete delivery consultation with you so that decisions are easily reached before and during.

I've seen pictures of you, you're not morbidly obese... I was thinking of those tubs of lard that need cranes to get out of bed. Or the ones that require specially-built hospital operating tables. Not that you do anything medical to those people, might as well shoot them in the head for the risk it is to do stuff to them.
And yeah they don't show you the needle. Lean over, feel them cleaning the area, little prick, and done.

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Little prick? Uh no. More like a SWORD being stabbed into your back.

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Having had 10 of them in my back... if they numb the area well you it will still hurt but nothing near to when the doctor Fucks up like on my 9th one and didn't numb it enough. It seriously felt like someone trying to shove a un-sharpened pencil into my spinal nerve! My normal doctor could't to the epidural so he recommended this other guy .... MISTAKE!

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Yup, I once allowed a doctor in training to do one of mine. HUGE mistake. FUCK! FUCKING RETARD. Me for allowing it and him for fucking up my back. Permanent nerve damage now.

Congrats! I'm planning on having the epidural. Back labor runs in my family and its no fun on a monthly basis so I can only imagine what it would be like during labor. Drug me up!

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I used to have HORRIBLE and I do mean horrible horrible cramps/back pain every month during my period. The pain was so bad I would throw up repeatedly. But all my labors were breezes. And all my family have had horrible horrible labors...except me. I always encourage ladies to give it a shot without and see how it goes because you never know- you can't judge off anyone else's labors, and not even always your own previous ones! Recovery for you and baby is much easier and quicker, too. You might find that you breeze right through it! Of course with that being said, I am not one of those who thinks that epidurals are evil and blah blah blah. Heck, I had one myself and with every single labor I had the same mindset- go natural if I can, but don't be a martyr, ask for one if I think I need it!

My biggest worry is that I may not be able to be in the delivery room due to my PTSD....

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Talk to your health care provider about this. They could have you at her head so you dont see anything and she can try to keep things as relaxed and cool as possible. I'm sure you guys can think of something so you can be there.

My biggest worry is that I may not be able to be in the delivery room due to my PTSD....

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Talk to your health care provider about this. They could have you at her head so you dont see anything and she can try to keep things as relaxed and cool as possible. I'm sure you guys can think of something so you can be there.

They don't show you the needle. You may be shaking so much and about to tear the side rail off the bed that you won't even notice it going in. The hardest part was when i was forced to lay still while the needle was inserted.

Things you lose quickly in the birthing situation.

1. fear of things
2. modesty

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Haha, no kidding, when my second daughter was born the nurse was there, the OB was there, they'll pulled in an anaesthesiologist to try to give me a spinal because they were going to rush me to the OR (baby was face-first) -- he didn't get it done before she started crowning, then since it was a teaching hospital they were like "mind if some students observe?" and I was like "kind of busy here, I don't give a crap" and they were like "HEY ALL Y'ALL GET IN HERE AND SEE THIS" and then like 12 people all came in there and they grabbed my husband from down the hall just in time for the baby to come flying out.

So yeah, modesty? XD Whatever.

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Lucky biatch, mine came out facefirst... ALL THE GODDAMN WAY with no involvement of scalpels. With no drugs. Second pregnancy, I told my OB "this one is going to be a planned c-section, I'm not going through all that recovery again. Ever."

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Er, yeah, I had no drugs either (unless you count pitocin). The anaesthesiologist got the lidocaine in to prepare me for the big needle, but she started crowning before he could get the spinal done. She was born vaginally.

Edit: also I was lucky and didn't really even tear, I don't even know what that means if anything.

Haha, no kidding, when my second daughter was born the nurse was there, the OB was there, they'll pulled in an anaesthesiologist to try to give me a spinal because they were going to rush me to the OR (baby was face-first) -- he didn't get it done before she started crowning, then since it was a teaching hospital they were like "mind if some students observe?" and I was like "kind of busy here, I don't give a crap" and they were like "HEY ALL Y'ALL GET IN HERE AND SEE THIS" and then like 12 people all came in there and they grabbed my husband from down the hall just in time for the baby to come flying out.

So yeah, modesty? XD Whatever.

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Lucky biatch, mine came out facefirst... ALL THE GODDAMN WAY with no involvement of scalpels. With no drugs. Second pregnancy, I told my OB "this one is going to be a planned c-section, I'm not going through all that recovery again. Ever."

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my first was face first as well, second was breach all the way to my due date, then she flipped herself over probably the night before I went into labor. Third came out hand first.

sorry, but face first is NOTHING compared to hand first, you get the head and shoulders coming out all at once.

Lucky biatch, mine came out facefirst... ALL THE GODDAMN WAY with no involvement of scalpels. With no drugs. Second pregnancy, I told my OB "this one is going to be a planned c-section, I'm not going through all that recovery again. Ever."

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my first was face first as well, second was breach all the way to my due date, then she flipped herself over probably the night before I went into labor. Third came out hand first.

sorry, but face first is NOTHING compared to hand first, you get the head and shoulders coming out all at once.

Lucky biatch, mine came out facefirst... ALL THE GODDAMN WAY with no involvement of scalpels. With no drugs. Second pregnancy, I told my OB "this one is going to be a planned c-section, I'm not going through all that recovery again. Ever."

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my first was face first as well, second was breach all the way to my due date, then she flipped herself over probably the night before I went into labor. Third came out hand first.

sorry, but face first is NOTHING compared to hand first, you get the head and shoulders coming out all at once.

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yeah I think hand first wins in terms of ouchiness.

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Not entirely sure why they threw me on pitocin right away when I got there... whole thing was over in 5 hours from water breaking to baby out. Doc almost didn't have time to get there. C-section was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better, omg.

The first was when his skull came out as a point, and as soon as his entire head cleared....it POPPED into a sphere. I almost passed out.

The second was when I was asked to cut the cord, I was shaking, because my son was just born...and they put the two clamps as CLOSE AS HUMANLY FUCKING POSSIBLE, so I couldn't get the scissors in between them. So without thinking, I grabbed the umbilical with my free hand to steady myself. It felt....weird. But I was sure I just killed the baby, the mom, and contaminated everything in the room....
Until I looked at the Doctor who just smiled at my idiocy and nodded that it was okay.

I hope my wife doesn't need a C-Section (she is on the small side though...) ...

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I've been talking to my OB about this because it is a big fear for me. I'm currently 30 weeks so preparing for the birth is kinda top of my list. I'm not exactly small but my baby is measuring to be in the 95 percentile right now so that means there is the possibility of him being a REALLY big baby. The human body can do amazing things, if you give it the opportunity. Make sure your doctor knows you dont want to have a c-section unless it comes down to the wire. Your doctor knows what to look for to make sure Mom and baby are going to come out of this the best way possible. Just be open and honest about what you want and go from there. And keep in mind that little people have been birthing babies for a very long time. My 5 foot 2, 100 pound friend gave birth to a ten pound baby no problems. It can happen.

I hope my wife doesn't need a C-Section (she is on the small side though...) ...

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I'm five feet tall, petite frame, and I was 105 lbs when I got pregnant with my first. My babies have ranged in size from 6 lbs 15 oz to 8 lbs 13 oz. Not even CLOSE to needing a c-section ever. And the nearly nine pounder was just as easy to birth as the sub seven pounder.

Neither a woman's height, or the width of her hips, or the baby's size, are reliable predictors of whether or not she will need a c-section. Height is completely irrelevant, hip size you just don't know because the hips are designed to spread apart during birth, and the vagina is also designed to allow babies of all sizes through- not to mention that as it gets closer to the due date, baby weight estimates can be off by as much as two pounds. I can't tell you how many women have been told "your baby is too big to birth vaginally" and then gave birth to six or seven pound babies.

A doctor should always be able to present specific, relevant medical reasons as to why a section would be necessary and not rely on bogus or general reasons. Height of the mother is a bogus reason. There are no studies, not a single one, that show that shorter mothers have a higher rate of medically necessary c-sections, and zero studies that show that those sections are a result of height. Ditto for "small hips".

Not entirely sure why they threw me on pitocin right away when I got there... whole thing was over in 5 hours from water breaking to baby out. Doc almost didn't have time to get there. C-section was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better, omg.

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They put me on pitocin with my first because it had been three days and I was only up to 1cm. >.< Then the kid was born within an hour and a half of being on pitocin + epidural.

With my second, my water broke and they put me on pitocin 16 hours later because they wanted me to deliver within 24 hours of the breakage. I was at 3cm then. Two hours later, I was at 5cm and they discovered that the baby was face-first. They stopped the pitocin, because apparently you're not supposed to do an induction with the baby in that orientation. I went from 5cm to crowning in fifteen minutes and I think I only properly pushed once -- actually, I didn't really push myself, it just kind of happened without me, and she came flying out. Midwife thought the baby must have levered herself out with her chin on my pubic bone or something. It was crazy and ridiculous and I never want to go through that again. Poor kid looked like a giant blueberry. They thought she wouldn't be able to nurse, but she latched on and went at it like a champ.

@Velvet_Ice remember that weight estimates in the later parts of pregnancy can be wildly inaccurate. And I hope your birth goes awesome for you! For your wife too @Lanacan.

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Oh, I know. I talked to the tech doing the ultrasound and she confirmed it for me. He has been in the 95% from the very first ultrasound(19 weeks) and at the last one (27 weeks) was estimated to be 3 weeks ahead of "normal" in size. She said chances are he was going to be big, but you never know until baby is actually born.

My nephew Jack was getting cleaned by the nurse just before she was to take some vitals during our visit at the hospital right after being born and he blew that right out with an adult sounding blast of a fart all over the nurse.

My nephew Jack was getting cleaned by the nurse just before she was to take some vitals during our visit at the hospital right after being born and he blew that right out with an adult sounding blast of a fart all over the nurse.

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that is awesome. and hilarious. and awesome. omg i wish i had been there to see it.

My nephew Jack was getting cleaned by the nurse just before she was to take some vitals during our visit at the hospital right after being born and he blew that right out with an adult sounding blast of a fart all over the nurse.

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that is awesome. and hilarious. and awesome. omg i wish i had been there to see it.

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We were all talking while the nurse was doing her thing then all of a sudden we hear the fart and the nurse screech LOL

My wife's labor was pretty challenging. We went to all the classes about it and whatnot, learned all the pain techniques to avoid medication. She's small (105lbs), and our OB told us it's all about the hips as to whether she couldn't deliver naturally...and didn't see any reason why should couldn't. Anyway, she was on meds for elevated blood pressure for most of the pregnancy, but it started going up about two weeks before our son was due. We had a couple appointments a week because of this. A week before he was due, we went in for a checkup that afternoon and her BP was in the 160/100 range. Our doctor admitted us that instant because she was worried about eclampsia.

They started the Pitocin to induce and also put her on magnesium sulfate to combat eclampsia. The downside is those two kind of battle each other, plus the mag sulf causes dizziness, nausea, and some other stuff. After being in some form of labor for 30 hours and getting to about 4 cm, she had enough of the pain and got the epidural. At about 36 hours, she'd gone up to 9cm and stayed there for another 8 hours. Then she went to 8cm. She had had enough of it and called for the C-section. But, they had let her mag sulf levels get borderline toxic, so she had to have a treatment for a couple hours prior to the c-section. After 46 hours of labor, our boy was born.

Now, the mag sulf also affects the baby. He was REALLY lethargic and I guess he would forget to breathe. The damn nurses kept saying "he's having another episode" and put an oxygen tube next to his nose, which would trigger him to breathe. Of course, they didn't tell me what the fuck an "episode" meant, so I was freaked the hell out. My boy was having episodes, my wife was in post-op alone...it's kind of a fucked up situation and I didn't know what to do. I floated between the two to make sure they both knew I was present, so it worked out. My wife then had retained so much water from something that she developed a rash on her legs that turned into full out blisters (down both legs/feet). None of the doctors could figure out what it was and they even called in the infectious disease doctor, who ran tests. Ultimately, our OB had us visit a dermatologist who immediately knew what it was...something about the fluid has no way out of the body so it comes out through the skin. I'd have to go back through my emails to remember what it was called. But they fixed that up in a few days.

Moral of the story - your job is support, so do it to the best of your abilities and it'll all work out great. She's going through some shit, your baby is going through some shit...it's your job to make it as easy and comfortable for both as you possibly can. But it's okay in your mind to freak the fuck out...just play it off well. And then you're ready for the REALLY fucked up stage...which is dealing with a newborn. It gets better around 3.5-4 months. WAY better.

We have lots of support @Immortal_Haze My Mother-in-law is a NICU Nurse at Milwaukee's Children's Hospital.

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That's awesome, man. Those ladies are a special breed of people that I can't respect enough.

If you've never dealt with a newborn, take it from me - you're going to lose your shit at some point. As in almost crying in tiredness, "can I take this thing back" level of lose your shit. But it's temporary and the little one will be the sparkle in your eye before you know it. Feel free to PM me if you need any new father venting or questions. It's the hardest but most rewarding experience I've ever had.

My wife's labor was pretty challenging. We went to all the classes about it and whatnot, learned all the pain techniques to avoid medication. She's small (105lbs), and our OB told us it's all about the hips as to whether she couldn't deliver naturally...and didn't see any reason why should couldn't. Anyway, she was on meds for elevated blood pressure for most of the pregnancy, but it started going up about two weeks before our son was due. We had a couple appointments a week because of this. A week before he was due, we went in for a checkup that afternoon and her BP was in the 160/100 range. Our doctor admitted us that instant because she was worried about eclampsia.

They started the Pitocin to induce and also put her on magnesium sulfate to combat eclampsia. The downside is those two kind of battle each other, plus the mag sulf causes dizziness, nausea, and some other stuff. After being in some form of labor for 30 hours and getting to about 4 cm, she had enough of the pain and got the epidural. At about 36 hours, she'd gone up to 9cm and stayed there for another 8 hours. Then she went to 8cm. She had had enough of it and called for the C-section. But, they had let her mag sulf levels get borderline toxic, so she had to have a treatment for a couple hours prior to the c-section. After 46 hours of labor, our boy was born.

Now, the mag sulf also affects the baby. He was REALLY lethargic and I guess he would forget to breathe. The damn nurses kept saying "he's having another episode" and put an oxygen tube next to his nose, which would trigger him to breathe. Of course, they didn't tell me what the fuck an "episode" meant, so I was freaked the hell out. My boy was having episodes, my wife was in post-op alone...it's kind of a fucked up situation and I didn't know what to do. I floated between the two to make sure they both knew I was present, so it worked out. My wife then had retained so much water from something that she developed a rash on her legs that turned into full out blisters (down both legs/feet). None of the doctors could figure out what it was and they even called in the infectious disease doctor, who ran tests. Ultimately, our OB had us visit a dermatologist who immediately knew what it was...something about the fluid has no way out of the body so it comes out through the skin. I'd have to go back through my emails to remember what it was called. But they fixed that up in a few days.

Moral of the story - your job is support, so do it to the best of your abilities and it'll all work out great. She's going through some shit, your baby is going through some shit...it's your job to make it as easy and comfortable for both as you possibly can. But it's okay in your mind to freak the fuck out...just play it off well. And then you're ready for the REALLY fucked up stage...which is dealing with a newborn. It gets better around 3.5-4 months. WAY better.

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My first two babies had to go to NICU right after birth for breathing problems, those were the two that I had naturally. the third that I did have the epi had just fine breathing. It is really hard to be away from your baby and not know what is happening right after they're born. I'm just glad they let my mom go with the babies. I also had BP issues in my first pregnancy, but not too serious thankfully.

My first two babies had to go to NICU right after birth for breathing problems, those were the two that I had naturally. the third that I did have the epi had just fine breathing. It is really hard to be away from your baby and not know what is happening right after they're born. I'm just glad they let my mom go with the babies. I also had BP issues in my first pregnancy, but not too serious thankfully.

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Mine was in the nursery the entire stay, first due to the mag sulf stuff and then due to jaundice. We even got discharged a day before he did, which was really hard. That and Good Sam hospital's discharge staff can suck a donkey schlong with their lack of communication to us. Nurses were phenomenal. People in charge of coordinating/informing us of the discharge plan for both us and our baby got a leeeengthy letter.