Sunday, March 29, 2015

They brought me supplies. I have milk, cheese and veggies. I have honey and chocolate bars. Yumm! And more yogurt to take my vitamins. It was so wonderful to see them. I miss their faces. I miss their voices. We went to the playground again with Joey. He went down the roller slide with his Daddy, and swung on the swings on his tummy. Rosie and I went down the chute slide again. This time she climbed right into my lap and rode all the way to the bottom! She loved it! She ran around, crazy like, leaping in the air! Then we went for a walk, and I told Joey the parts of "The Gruffalo" as we came to the lake, the stream and the rock. That was yesterday evening.

Today I had a terrific day. No one else was here and I spent most of the day outside. I used my Panda wash machine and did all the laundry, hanging them over tree branches to dry. It was perfect. 65°, breezy and I didn't have to run for cover once. I had the RV completely opened up to air out and even aired out my mattress! We washed rugs, jeans and even my sheets. You have to do those items one at a time because the basket is so small. But I washed several tops at once. In between, while the washer was running, Rosie and I went over and played on the slides again. She still loves it. We tried the roller slide, but she wasn't as thrilled with it. She went down the first time by herself. She liked it better sitting on me. Then I took a long hot shower and washed my hair. Glorious! I followed up by emptying of the black and gray water, again, and refilling the fresh. I finished up the washing chores with washing Rosie, using the outside handheld shower. Afterwards we took our usual walk. I wanted her to dry out some out there, rather than in the RV. Rosie was completely pooped. I was too, for a while, but I needed to bring in the laundry and put the RV back together. So I made myself get up off the couch. I even made a delicious cream of mushroom, broccoli and sweet potato chowder. Yum! Now I'm just kicking back enjoying a peaceful close of the day, with the windows and door still wide open. This is why I'm looking for a remote property. I feel like a real person. I can have a life. I can do things for myself. I'm not imprisoned.

Saturday, March 28, 2015

I'm curled up in pain fighting off a stout lymphoma attack. I've taken several of my nutraceuticals, but I'm out of yogurt. Since I have to open the caps to take them, I have to put them in something I can get them down with. A few of them taste so bad I gag. I took the ones that weren't as bad with some honey. I've zapped myself, needled myself and ran the shiatsu massager. The pain is so bad in my back and neck they are intermittantly paralyzed. The impaction comes and goes through my thoracic duct and chest as well. I also heated up a bottle of water and held that where I could reach. It was bringing it down a small amount, but not for long. I gave in and gave myself an IV Glute. It was a 10 month past expiration date. I hope it was still good. Almost 2 months since the last shot.

It's been a rough couple of days. That's probably what set it off. I found out I had to stay another 9 days, and I was barely hanging on for the original 10 days of solitary confinement. I was looking forward to the three day weekend so Rosie and I could get out more. We stay in the RV while the maintainance crews are working. Unfortunately the crew broke a water main. They're working over time, this weekend, to fix it. It would have been fine (other than not getting out except in the evening) except the wind switched around and was blowing across the diesel equipment right t'word me. They also took out the power, and the sun was shining. The outside temp was 70°. Rosie and I were sweltering in here. No air purifiers, no air conditioning. We tried to open a vent when we thought it was safe, but occassionally we smelled diesel. So the upset, plus the diesel has really got me.

I'd ordered new Glute but it showed up at the house after I was forced to leave. My husband was supposed to bring it, and supplies, up this last Wednesday. Unfortunately, he's supposed to be going in for hernia surgery, and getting around in that condition has slowed him way down. He rescheduled to come up today, with my daughter and grandson, Joey-boy. I hope the crew finishes before they get here...

Friday, March 20, 2015

That's right. Spray season began in January this year. It began with Bellinger applying "fertilizer" and not notifying. Since I was trapped there, I was hurt. Then, just as I was starting to recover from that one he "seeded." His guys forgot to notify, again. They also swear it wasn't treated seed. My body said different. Though the farm manager that was supposed to call me was a lot friendlier that time. Then this last Monday, Hodges (the guy farming behind the evil neighbor) applied something so toxic that everybody in the field was wearing full coverage hazmat suits. That had to be bad! He didn't notify either. I did a full lock down again and didn't figure on coming out until Sunday. More hurt.

So yesterday I get a text from the same guy that farmed the piece across the road from me last year. Yeah, the one that applied glyphosate and gave me the 6 huge cavities. He informs me he'll be having glyphosate applied to that same field that afternoon. Katy bar the door!!! I only had a few short hours to gather, prepare, and load my RV with almost everything. I can't even get outside and I'm watching Joey (now 2), whose down with snot, diarrhea and feels miserable. He's also getting into everything, so Its not like I could get any of that list done! Plus, the creep was so abusive when I called him for the same thing last year, I don't want to endure another round. My PTSD reared its massive head and dropped on me like a piano out of a second story window. I called my husband. He said he'd take care of it. When 40 minutes went by, and I hadn't heard anything back yet I figured Ron hadn't got through. I also figured the abusive farmer was just not going to respond at all. I took my power back and end ran him, just like last year. I called the spray company. The owner gave me the name and number of the kid who was going to be spraying. I called him and told him my deal, and that I need 48 hrs notice. He said, "fine." I told him that I might manage to get out by Friday afternoon, this time. He was pleased it was only one day. He called the farmer and apprised him of the change. The farmer was livid!

I'm not exactly sure what all went down. Here's what I do know. Ron got an instant call back. The farmer told Ron the guy who was doing the spraying told him that I threatened to sue, so they weren't going to do it at all. I didn't even come close. But that wouldn't be the first time the guy has over dramatized to manipulate things. Then he whined about how his spray rig was broken... Ron told him if he had given adequate notice in the first place he wouldn't be having these problems. He told him that 2 or 3 hrs notice was totally unrealistic. The farmer whined some more about how inconvenient it was for him and how he wasn't getting his work done. Ron came back with how he wasn't the only one inconvenienced here, and told the abuser that he had left his job in the middle of the day and was enroute back to the house to help me get the RV ready. His business wasn't being done either. I haven't had much of a chance to talk to my husband, so I don't know if he brought up the huge inconvenience it is to me! Anyway, Ron tells the abusive farmer that we're doing everything we can to cooperate so he should make it easier on himself and reciprocate. He told him that if he's even thinking about spraying he should tell (my husband) that. That way when he actually schedules it, we'll be able to leave with shorter notice. The farmer says he has a call. He calls back and informs Ron that they will be spraying at 9:00 this (Friday) morning. Ron called me and passed on the notice. I told my husband to head back to work, for now. We'd load the RV after Joey went home.

I tried to gather some things, and keep helpful little hands out of them. I cooked some stew to take. I made a couple of lists. All the while trying to make Joey's day fun, and reign in my runaway PTSD. Then I hear a large truck. I looked out the window and saw a cab and flatbed hauling a spray rig onto the property right across the road. It was followed closely by a tanker of pesticide! It was like Godzilla just lept into my living room like he leaps over Japanese buildings! "Oh that lying sack of shit!" I thought. I'm shaking so hard I can hardly think or dial. I call the spray company to see if they'd been coerced by the abusive farmer into spraying today. No, they won't be doing the job at all; they had thought it was getting weird. I ask him if he told the farmer "I threatened to sue" like the farmer had said to Ron? He said no, and that it was getting really weird. I agreed. I watched the trucks drive around the circle. The young man on the phone told me a different company was doing it. I weedle the name out of him. Only that company wouldn't answer their phone. It was set to fax. The tanker began filling the spray rig. I call Ron, who texted the farmer. I got a call back from Ron that they were told to go to the far side of the field and get it ready to spray first thing in the morning. I was relieved they weren't spraying right away. Then I thought, "Great, they always spill. That will be more toxins to try to get through when I try to go out. @@"

When Ron got home, he filled the RV water tank and then kept Joey occupied while I gathered all the non perisphable stuff. He ferried all that stuff to the RV after Joey went home.

I didn't get more than 2 hrs of sleep. I couldn't relax. I kept having PTSD attacks. I was also trying to figure out how I was going to get Rosie and I to the RV, without contamination. I think I dropped off between 2:30 & 3:30. I remember looking at the clock and it was 3:35. I was still awake at 5:00 a.m. But the alarm woke me at 6:00. I made coffee and loaded all the food into carry ons, by the door. We'd just started negotiating Rosie and I out when Justin arrived with Joey. Ron was going to take him to daycare. I made a dash to the RV, while Ron held them off. Only Joey had thrown up all over himself and his daddy's car. Change of plans. I told Ron to let me take Joey. I couldn't let him go to daycare while he was so sick. Ron was also supposed to go in and get some pre-surgery testing done... I'd wait for him in a safe place near his work, with Joey, until he was done for the day. He got Joey cleaned up and brought him to us, using the same method we'd worked out. The poor little guy was shaking and obviously sick. I made him some weak ginger root "tea" for his upset tummy, before we left the house. I still had to put away all the stuff Ron had transferred in the night before, in addition to the food he was frieghting over this morning. Joey was so sick and miserable that he sat quietly on the sofa, curled upgainst Rosie's fluffy body. I got some raw milk cheese in Joey with another cup of tea. :-) He was feeling better. I strapped him into his carseat, latched Rosie into her car safety harness and we got out before 8:00. Ron went to his test appointments.

Joey and I camped out in a day use area down by the river, away from any toxic activity. Ron had recommended it, saying " No one goes there." Well, that turned out to be not quite true. There was lots of traffic, but we stayed in the RV. Joey colored and poked, prodded and flipped every switch and button/knob he could find. He'd had a nice nap on the way, so he was feeling better. No more puking. We did have a little excitement when a police officer showed up to let me know I couldn't camp there after sundown. He got a little tense when I wouldn't open the window. I showed him a copy of my doctor's letter. He was, immediately very understanding. Then I assured him I was just waiting for my husband. When Ron showed up we left that spot and headed for the mountains. Joey fell asleep again. Ron followed in his car. He was coming to unlock the gate. We were actually going to a closed campground he'd done some work for. It took us 2 hours to get there. The road was rough and the RV was doing a lot of bucking and swaying. Ron was sure Joey would have puked. But no. He was fine. He felt so much better we took him out to play on the play ground. Then Ron and Joey headed back down the mountain to Joey's house, leaving Rosie and I behind the locked gate. We're going to be here for a while.

About Me

In 2004 I was diagnosed with Chemical Sensitivity. It resulted from pesticide poisoning, a Toxic Injury. I lost about 98% of who I was. I've embarked on the journey of "Rebuilding me."
You can find me on Facebook at "Toxed2loss"