As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

I'm the Lucky One I Guess

I have, fortunately, never had problems getting my daughter to eat. She pretty much likes everything we put in front of her. When ever I would have something to eat, she would always ask for a bite...and then a second....until I pretty much started sharing everything with her. Even now she eats pretty much anything and as long as we are seated at the table with her, we really don't have a problem getting her to eat.

My brother's kids, on the other hand, are on the exact other end of the sprctrum. Never have I ever seen 2 kids so picky. And they are strange. The don;t like things most kids like such as hot dogs, cake, or any kinds of candy or sweets. But my niece, she is the worst. There are days when she flat out refuses to eat anything, period, no matter if it something she likes or not. She is severely under weight for her age.

show them respect as separate human beings

I'm not obssed with food for my kids, I never had any problems with my children with food they eat what I give and thats it. I have no junk food in my house.

I get what you mean by not reheating the food, yes that makes sense, unfortunatly some kids will play up on that, I run a day care and some kids will not eat what I give them and wait for snack time to come around and eat that, yes, my snacks are very healthy, but they need to eat their veggies and meat. I have this litlle girl who did that for weeks on end, she would not eat her meal and wait for snack. After a month or so of that I got tired of seeing her eat only her snacks and not her meal, (I would give her only one spinach, and one peice of meat and a potato, she would eat the potato and nothing else) If she would have atleast tried to put it in her mouth and spit it out, hé, congrats I'd be happy.

So I talked it over with her mom, and we decided to try that for a while(reheating her food) well it only took 1 week of reheating her food and now she will everyting on her plat and she is very happy! Even if she doesn't eat everything she atleast try's it before saying she does not like it!

I do not force anything down any childs mouth and do not pressure them, meal time is a fantastick time to learn and a relaxing time also!

Since my oldest son started school, from kindergarten to the second grade, I've had his teachers call me to tell me that my son has the healtiest snacks they have ever seen in years! All home made, no surgar and he eats it with gusto! They even asked me to provide a list that they could pass to other parents to give ideas!

I have other day cares asking me to give them tricks for their kids to eat and recepies cause they all know that I'm a healty nut and quite good with children I might add. So before judging someone you have no idea about is not a very good thing!

Why should a child have to try something if he doesn't want to? I don't happen to like cake. I can't tell you how many people have urged and urged me to just take a bite, but I politely say no as many times as necessary. I don't want to try it. It doesn't appeal to me. And there's (almost )nothing as personal as being pressured to take soemthing into your mouth that you don't want in there!

My kids got to take or refuse the healthy foods they were offered, whether it was called lunch, snack or anything else. If they didn't want it, OK. No criticism or demands. They just weren't offered junk instead. If they finished everything on their plate, fine. If they didn't, fine.

By the time each one was 7 or 8, they were trying the most daring stuff in restaurants- escargots (snails), lapin (rabbit), hot mexican peppers, indian food. They tried stuff I've yet to taste. They did not associate food with anything except the pleasure of taste and satisfying hunger. Other parents used to ask me, "how do you get him or her to eat so well?" I'd tell them, "I don't. I just leave them alone and let them discover the healthy food they like at whatever rate works for them."

Sometimes they'd come home from a friend's house in tears. "So-and-so-'s mother made me eat whatever when I didn't want to." They felt violated. I taught them to say to anyone who was being a bully about what they ate or tasted, "my mother says I don't have to try anything I don't want to try and she gets mad if anyone tries to force me." Nobody pushed them after hearing that.

I was brought up in a home with constant fights over food. My sister was very skinny and I had a repetoire of about 5 foods. I was well into my 20s before I was willing to begin to try unknown foods. To this day, the thought of anyone trying to make me eat something I do not want to put in my mouth is very offensive.

My kids are now grown and very free and unburdened about food. That makes me so happy. They believe food is to enjoy. They never starved or were nutritionally unbalanced. They're neither overweight nor underweight. Life was so much easier than when I was a child. I just had to respect them & their preference as much as I would have respected the preferences of a complete stranger who just happened to be an adult. My only rule was not to have junk around. They ate it outside, anyway. But I just shut up and never made food an issue. It worked.

41/2 yr old very picky eater

I have a 4 1/2 year old girl who has been a pick y eater since 9 mo old. She now is down to waffles w/peanut butter and syrup everyday sometimes I will make pancakes with Peanut butter and syrup also. (p.s. in order to get some nutrition in her I will make the pancakes from scratch and boil carrots and zuccini and then blend in a blender with half the batter and mix with the rest I also do half flour and half wheat flour so she will get more fiber. This works real well because she doesn't notice the difference with the peanut butter and syrup.) A mom has to do what a mom has to do. Anyway this is the only thing she has ate for breakfast for 3 years now. She hates the smell of cereal and refuses to even try it. She doesn't drink milk or juice....only water. She refuses to try ANY fruit. For lunch and dinner she will now only eat Mac and cheeze ( I get the one from costco that doesn't have all the junk in it - all natural. She also loves pepperoni pizza or cheeze pizza. The only veggie she will eat now is broccoli cooked and raw carrots dipped. She likes speggetti without the meat and tacos with the meat and cheeze and sour cream. She likes cheeze, wheat breat, Yoplay yogurt in Key lime flavor only and crackers of various flavors. She likes some cookies and frosting on cake. She will not eat chocolate candy, gummy candy for fruit snacks or any other kind of candy,,,,,which I think is a plus. My biggest problem is she refuses to try new things which drives me crazy. For the most part my husband and I eat very healthy. I try not to make issues out of her eating, but she is the type of kid that does not live for food. She eats very slow and very small portions for the most part....which I think is good, but she examines every little morsel and makes sure is is just perfect....if there is one flaw in the food....it is out. Like the crust of bread the edge of the waffles, any burnt piece of anything or if it is too dark....if there is a speck of anything that she doesn't like on the food like jelly on the peanut butter bread.....she will not eat it. I know alot of these posts say to let them go without eating if they don't like what is for dinner etc......this does not faze my daughter.....she will just go without until the next meal. I have not tried it for consecutive days though....maybe thats my next thing. Again she will not try new things and thats what is so hard. I can live with her not liking something she has tried, its just getting her to try it. Its very rare she will try something new.....maybe once in 4 months if I'm lucky and its usually out of the blue. I cook all my meals from scratch for the most part...I eat healthy, no fast food but a pizza here and there or a taco bell run, but again very sparingly. Junk food is not in our house very often and when it is I tell her that its for special occasions because its not very healthy. We cook together sometimes but maybe we could do more.....not sure what else I can do anyone have any more suggestions??

Picky Eaters

My daughter is 5 years old and her name is destiny. The only solution any one can give me is only give her good food and nothing elese she will eat eat before she starves. Maybe so but 2 nights of sending her to bed hungry was all i could take. Destiny will eat speggetti o's but only the 123/abc's w/ no meat balls. sour cream and onion potato chips Lays only. ramen noodels chicken flavor. can cheese and crackers. and peperoni pizza. chicken nuggets and fries. oh and rolls or toast with butter. other than a few sweets thats it. And it has to be perfect she examines every bite before she will eat it. if it has a black speck or anything she don't like the looks of its gross and she won't eat it. even if she is hungry and hasn't ate all day. I don't exspect solutions. I just want to let everyone know their not alone. It is so frusrating to cook them pizza when they ask and then have them refuse to eat it because its got a black speck on it. I want to tell her tough crap thats all she is getting and bust her butt for asking for food and not eating it. But it doesnt help and I know she is still hungry so I just have to take it back and try again. jackie

Picky Eaters

I have totally forgotten how PICKY 2 yo's are! I have trouble getting him to eat much of anything! The one thing I can count on him eating is ritz crackers & fishey crackers. Outside of those it is hit & miss with the rest. It is driving me NUTS!! LOL

My 6 yo boy will only eat his meat (ground beef variations--meat loaf, sloppy joes, beef, noodles and gray) with Ranch Dressing. He needs his pizza without sauce and he won't eat spaghetti sauce (no big surprise there; some kids don't like tomato based stuff). He took a ham & cheese sandwich to school every day for kindergarten last year, but this year he's ventured out into turkey and roast beef -- but he prefers to call it white ham (turkey) and brown ham (roast beef). I figure whatever works--3 different color "ham" works for me as long as he eats it. Oh, and he won't eat any kind of potato.

My 13 yo girl prefers to only eat chicken and turkey (which she invariably calls chicken)--gripes any time we have variations of ground beef.

My 16 yo stepson believes that one should have a bacon cheese burger every meal. He doesn't have milk on his cereal, and greatly dislikes ALL veggies.

We have a very picky household when it comes to veggies on the side anyhow--we have our choice between corn and Bush's baked beans. My poor husband--who really likes green beans and peas--hardly ever gets them (it's a bit of a waste for even a small can for one person).

My husband and my 6 yo are the only ones who eat cooked carrots and NONE of us eat fish (the 13 and 16 yo do like shrimp, but I'm not sure I could be paid enough money to ever make it).

Needless to say, what to cook for dinner on any given night, can stir up quite a bit of controversy.

Thank God for snacktime afterwards--if they don't eat dinner--no snack. They seem to be able to choke down their dislikes--now if I can just get them to quit complaining!!!

hope it helps

I have a 4 1/2 year old girl who has been a pick y eater since 9 mo old. She now is down to waffles w/peanut butter and syrup everyday sometimes I will make pancakes with Peanut butter and syrup also. (p.s. in order to get some nutrition in her I will make the pancakes from scratch and boil carrots and zuccini and then blend in a blender with half the batter and mix with the rest I also do half flour and half wheat flour so she will get more fiber. This works real well because she doesn't notice the difference with the peanut butter and syrup.) A mom has to do what a mom has to do. Anyway this is the only thing she has ate for breakfast for 3 years now. She hates the smell of cereal and refuses to even try it. She doesn't drink milk or juice....only water. She refuses to try ANY fruit. For lunch and dinner she will now only eat Mac and cheeze ( I get the one from costco that doesn't have all the junk in it - all natural. She also loves pepperoni pizza or cheeze pizza. The only veggie she will eat now is broccoli cooked and raw carrots dipped. She likes speggetti without the meat and tacos with the meat and cheeze and sour cream. She likes cheeze, wheat breat, Yoplay yogurt in Key lime flavor only and crackers of various flavors. She likes some cookies and frosting on cake. She will not eat chocolate candy, gummy candy for fruit snacks or any other kind of candy,,,,,which I think is a plus. My biggest problem is she refuses to try new things which drives me crazy. For the most part my husband and I eat very healthy. I try not to make issues out of her eating, but she is the type of kid that does not live for food. She eats very slow and very small portions for the most part....which I think is good, but she examines every little morsel and makes sure is is just perfect....if there is one flaw in the food....it is out. Like the crust of bread the edge of the waffles, any burnt piece of anything or if it is too dark....if there is a speck of anything that she doesn't like on the food like jelly on the peanut butter bread.....she will not eat it. I know alot of these posts say to let them go without eating if they don't like what is for dinner etc......this does not faze my daughter.....she will just go without until the next meal. I have not tried it for consecutive days though....maybe thats my next thing. Again she will not try new things and thats what is so hard. I can live with her not liking something she has tried, its just getting her to try it. Its very rare she will try something new.....maybe once in 4 months if I'm lucky and its usually out of the blue. I cook all my meals from scratch for the most part...I eat healthy, no fast food but a pizza here and there or a taco bell run, but again very sparingly. Junk food is not in our house very often and when it is I tell her that its for special occasions because its not very healthy. We cook together sometimes but maybe we could do more.....not sure what else I can do anyone have any more suggestions??

hi i am judy from australia and i have an 8 year old son who has asperergers(high functioning autism) he is a very fussy eater and has been all his life i found the best way to cope is if he will eat any type of veg just keep giving them the same veg ,dosnt matter if they only eat two types of veg at least they are eating it,also make your own chicken nuggets and fish nuggets but when you coat it use an egg wash and add veg thats been through the blender if you use adark crumb like cornflake crumbs they dont know its there then dont fry it bake it in oven using a tiny bit of oil spray,also get her to try thing off you plate it wont always work but over time she might try something, but dont push any food issues if she trys something and likes it give her a small gift not food related(i keep small prizes in drawer for reward)i also leave a small plate in fridge with his name on it with things he likes like ham, grated cheese and he snacks on that when i am not looking i find he eats better when he thinks i dont know. also make your own yogurt and add flovours she likes she can help you make it takes a few tries but it works.i hope some of this helps you are quite welcome to email me at jnugget64@hotmail.com i am a chef so i do have lots of great childrens recipes see ya judy

Our eating habits

I wish I could do a survey to see how many of these kids that are having problems eating watch television while eating. I work at a daycare and about 75% of the problem eating kids were TV watchers. How many sit and watch their parent/s eat what they are eating or do they eat while house chores are being done or people are on the phone?(not uncommon in todays society)

Also some people need to be introduced to foods they don't like several times. I have 2 kids 14 & 11one will try anything in front of her(no she is not obese), she's great for going out to different restaurants. She's more like me now my son is like his dad. He is so picky that it's not funny. I have the same meals for everyone at my table, I expect everyone to at least try a little of everything and I make meals everyone likes at least one thing. There are items that not everyone likes but we all eat the same things. You see me Mom DOES NOT like hamburger. To the point that I gag while cooking it, but I still cook it and eat it. Little but I eat because I believe If I make them eat something they don't like they know I not only eat what I don't like I make it for them. As for my son the picky eater, his whole life I made him have a little bit of everything( started with 1/2 of a cooked carrot coin, loved raw but not cooked) so every time we had cooked carrots that's all I made him eat and slowly increased his portion to 1 then two small ones and so on. Now he gets full portions and that's how I introduced him to all the food he did not like. Let me tell you there were lots. This went for everything from yes peaches all the way to liver. Yes I know a lot of you think I'm mean but now there is no dish people will hand him he'll say no thanks to, if he's not sure if he will like it he'll say just a little please. I actually find it very rude when you are sitting at the table and people sit there and say oh that's gross or that's disgusting. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean everyone has to dislike it. You may like something that will make me gag and I don't sit there and make rude comments.

Picky Eaters

I wish I could do a survey to see how many of these kids that are having problems eating watch television while eating. I work at a daycare and about 75% of the problem eating kids were TV watchers. How many sit and watch their parent/s eat what they are eating or do they eat while house chores are being done or people are on the phone?(not uncommon in todays society)

Also some people need to be introduced to foods they don't like several times. I have 2 kids 14 & 11one will try anything in front of her(no she is not obese), she's great for going out to different restaurants. She's more like me now my son is like his dad. He is so picky that it's not funny. I have the same meals for everyone at my table, I expect everyone to at least try a little of everything and I make meals everyone likes at least one thing. There are items that not everyone likes but we all eat the same things. You see me Mom DOES NOT like hamburger. To the point that I gag while cooking it, but I still cook it and eat it. Little but I eat because I believe If I make them eat something they don't like they know I not only eat what I don't like I make it for them. As for my son the picky eater, his whole life I made him have a little bit of everything( started with 1/2 of a cooked carrot coin, loved raw but not cooked) so every time we had cooked carrots that's all I made him eat and slowly increased his portion to 1 then two small ones and so on. Now he gets full portions and that's how I introduced him to all the food he did not like. Let me tell you there were lots. This went for everything from yes peaches all the way to liver. Yes I know a lot of you think I'm mean but now there is no dish people will hand him he'll say no thanks to, if he's not sure if he will like it he'll say just a little please. I actually find it very rude when you are sitting at the table and people sit there and say oh that's gross or that's disgusting. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean everyone has to dislike it. You may like something that will make me gag and I don't sit there and make rude comments.

I think the imprant thing is to introduce our kids to the healthy stuff fromt he beginning, Ipersonally do not buy many snack foods for our home, in fact, we don't have dessert after dinner and we very rarely get dessert when we go out. I think also a good parent is going to be able to tell what their kid dislikes verses what they are are tring to avoid from eating. I refuse to make my children eat something that I know they dislike but they do have to give new foods a try and I serve it often. My youngest does not like raw veggies therefore I won't make her eat them, they know how to say no thank you and thank you, please, your welcome and all that, there is a polite way of doing and saying things, they are also not rude to others.

I do believe it retty much comes down tot he life style of the family and what is in the house and I also beleive us parents can influence our kids one way or the other with htier eating habits. We are healthy eaters in my home and my children do great with their choices. of course now, with this time of year when there are a lot more sweets int he house then the norm, like any normal 3 and 5 year old, tehy are gonna be tempted with the junk but again, they know the rules, eat a good meal and you can have a treat, otherwise,forget it. I think eating together as a family at the dinner table is a god start to healthy eating and getting the kids involved in preparing meals is a great asset and avoiding the junk by not having it int he home.

I always prepare foods that we all like and of course there are some foods that each of us don't like and that is not forced upon any one but there is always something healthy at my table and plenty of choices and every one gets a well, rounded nutricious meal.

in my home

I wish I could do a survey to see how many of these kids that are having problems eating watch television while eating. I work at a daycare and about 75% of the problem eating kids were TV watchers. How many sit and watch their parent/s eat what they are eating or do they eat while house chores are being done or people are on the phone?(not uncommon in todays society)

Also some people need to be introduced to foods they don't like several times. I have 2 kids 14 & 11one will try anything in front of her(no she is not obese), she's great for going out to different restaurants. She's more like me now my son is like his dad. He is so picky that it's not funny. I have the same meals for everyone at my table, I expect everyone to at least try a little of everything and I make meals everyone likes at least one thing. There are items that not everyone likes but we all eat the same things. You see me Mom DOES NOT like hamburger. To the point that I gag while cooking it, but I still cook it and eat it. Little but I eat because I believe If I make them eat something they don't like they know I not only eat what I don't like I make it for them. As for my son the picky eater, his whole life I made him have a little bit of everything( started with 1/2 of a cooked carrot coin, loved raw but not cooked) so every time we had cooked carrots that's all I made him eat and slowly increased his portion to 1 then two small ones and so on. Now he gets full portions and that's how I introduced him to all the food he did not like. Let me tell you there were lots. This went for everything from yes peaches all the way to liver. Yes I know a lot of you think I'm mean but now there is no dish people will hand him he'll say no thanks to, if he's not sure if he will like it he'll say just a little please. I actually find it very rude when you are sitting at the table and people sit there and say oh that's gross or that's disgusting. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean everyone has to dislike it. You may like something that will make me gag and I don't sit there and make rude comments.

3 year-old not eating

Hi everyone, I am having an issue with my daughter. She will not eat meat or Vegetables. We eat dinner together as a family, the tv is not on. She refuses to eat anything other than pasta. She had problems with food when she was on formula and onto the baby food. She was in the 10th percentile of weight, meaning she was under weight. She is good now weight wise but she will not eat anything but pastas. how can I get her to eat more things that have more nutritional values in them??? I am open to suggestions.