Story — (Therros) Missive from the King

I trust things have fared well for you thus far. Rest assured that I have kept as few eyes on you as possible, and I know not when this letter will reach you. I write this on the third day of Seedsprout, 1288TS. A few months since your abrupt departure.

Things have not gotten easier here. Refugees arrive daily, more numerous than each day before. Against Isorin’s counsel, I have decided to house them and protect them as best I can. As far as I am concerned, they are my people now. My responsibility. I worry that Nera is on the brink of collapse, but I can do nothing about it without risking my own people, and I cannot bring myself to do so.

If that wasn’t enough, I have heard rumors of unrest from the East. I worry of some deep, unknown threat there, and it is of no little concern to me that I am told this is the direction you headed when you left the kingdom. Of course, Isorin has offered to locate you and bring you home, but I have ordered him against it. You are a grown woman, and you may do as you please. Just be aware of the ones you have left behind. Do not be so careless as to rush into death, especially when you have so staunchly refused your studies of the arcane arts.

I don’t intend to persuade you to return home. I know how stubborn you are about your independence. It was perhaps your mother’s most unfavorable quality, and it both delights and saddens me to see so much of her in you. In any case, I know you have your own journey you must take. I have a few reports of the peculiar folk you have taken a liking to, and I reserve judgment, for they seem to be capable individuals.

With you gone, it has given me time to reflect on what transpired when last we spoke. I have decided that I was too harsh, and that even I am capable of blunder. So allow me to apologize for everything. The loss of your sister still weighs heavily on us all at home, but I will not attempt to excuse my regrettable actions. That being said, I feel it necessary to remind you that there was no nefarious plot surrounding your sister’s death. I know not what you seek to achieve so far from home, but if your desire is fueled by revenge, perish the idea. There is none to be had. Sometimes misfortune falls at the best of times, but fate is a cruel mistress.

I have tasked Isorin with the delivery of this letter, to ensure it’s safe journey. However, I have expressed my desire that he do so with minimal magic, as I know how uncomfortable it makes you. Still, I suspect he will ignore my wishes and make impossible haste in his effort to return to my side as soon as possible. Forgive him. He has the kingdom’s, and my, best interests at heart.

I pray to the gods above that you are safe, and for the love of all that is good, stay away from Teraldia. It may be the brightest beacon, but there lies the darkest shadows.

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3 thoughts on “Story — (Therros) Missive from the King”

My only critique – aside from a few minor wording choices which are simply due to me thinking “but it’s said this way” and therefore are kinda meaningless – is that you could probably avoid namedropping a lot – almost every proper noun you used could have simply been omitted and it would have felt a lot less “Lord of the Ringsy” in that regard, you know?

“Refugees [] arrive daily, more numerous than each day before. Against Isorin’s counsel, I have decided to house them and protect them as best I can. As far as I am concerned, they are [] citizens now, and therefore my responsibility. I worry that [our nation? I couldn’t infer was Nera is] is on the brink of collapse”

When I first read it, I immediately thought about tossing out Isorin’s name too, he’s in the letter enough to earn it. I learned who he was; but the rest seemed superfluous.

I feel like it’s one of those things that feels needed when you’ve only got this one page of text, but would probably become obvious and easier to work with/around if you had a book’s worth of words to deal with.

Ah, from my perspective – i.e. someone who doesn’t know anything so nothing is familiar, then the name drops seem a bit overbearing (do I need to remember all this?)

But from the perspective of someone who might actually know what these names are, it’s probably fine for the most part.

It really just comes down to how the person writing it really would write. A king writing to his daughter probably wouldn’t need to explain certain things, or he might need to emphasize some. Also, maybe he wanted to purposefully utilize her inside knowledge to prevent potential information leaks if enemies got a hold of the letter? Not sure if that’s relevant, but probably something a king would think about when writing stuff down.

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A Daily Dose of Derailment

Hey, my name is Kollin Cooley. Writer, improv actor and teacher, and college student living in Southern California.

If you’ve come in search of an interesting blog where you learn valuable things, I’m afraid you’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere. I’m impressed, considering you’re on the internet where there are no turns.

But now that you’re here, you may as well stay awhile and be disappointed with what you’ve found.

At least the only substantial amount of alliteration is in the title, so you won’t have to worry about that.

Note: all short stories here are first drafts. If I have edited them, I won’t have updated the post beyond typos.