Resisting The Urge To Buy, Buy, Buy

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I scanned the bookshelf and held a new copy of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo in my hands. The binding was unbroken, and the pages were cut like perfect rectangles — the book hadn’t been read.

It’s a favorite of mine, and it was being sold for the bargain price of $3.99. Looking at the back cover, I could see that this regularly cost $9.99. Alarm bells pinged in my head and I thought, “This is a steal! Does anyone know about this? Oh, I can’t let this stay on the shelf; Stieg, you shall be mine.”

I promptly proceeded to carry the new book around the store. My insides smiled as I clutched this deal that others had stubbornly missed. It was my prize, and I had won the shopping game.

But nowadays, in my frugal state, I’m a bizarre shopper. Instead of purchasing that “steal,” “find,” and “treasure,” I held the book throughout the store, and when it came time to actually checkout, I stuck it on some random piece of furniture (no doubt, annoying the shop’s attendants — I’m sorry!).

This goes against everything we are told about the psychology of shopping, but it feels oddly exhilarating. See, marketers know that if they can just get you to touch, feel, and hold an object, your likelihood of purchasing said object skyrockets. If their cameras were trained on me they would’ve seen me flip out about the deal with my friend, predicting a subsequent checkout — book in hand. But in the end, they’d be dead wrong.

There’s an oozing potion that comes from having things. To covet and hold seems so… American. We buy bigger vehicles for bigger homes to fit more stuff. We are a nation of filler-uppers; yet, the favorite part about shopping is in our imaginations — that split second when our minds scream, “buy, buy, buy.”

When I pick up that book, I imagine flipping through the thriller’s tantalizing pages and having the book forever. I picture it sitting on my shelf, a testament to that one time I read it and a beacon of conversation among friends. “Oh, yes, let me tell you about crime, affairs, and sordid protagonists in Sweden,” my imaginary voice already quips to a non-existent audience. The reality is far simpler and boring. I’d read it, stick it on a table, and be done with it.

There’s an alternative choice. I could rent it from the library for free. The $4 — deal of the century — is still more expensive and takes up more room than a temporary library book. What could be a better deal than free?!

To hold the book is like picking up a favorite drug and almost getting high. And at the last moment saying, “No. I’d rather spend my money on something else. I’d rather travel to France with my rudimentary language ability. I’d rather save up for a more comfortable future — one not spent working endless hours on a treadmill that always runs towards death.”

These days, I can hold the magic potion that I struggled with so much — spending wantonly. I can smell the elixir that is the rush of a purchase.

I like doing the same thing with cars. I’ve driven friends cars or rented cars that are faster and newer and of course more expensive than my own. I get an initial rush but before I can go buy a similar car, the rush goes away. It’s replaced with content for my own car. I experienced the hyper but it’s not for me.

Totally! Although that is a great series and everyone should read it :). I can definitely relate–just because something is a deal and on sale doesn’t mean you should buy it. I’m on a thrift store hiatus right now because I seem to find out that I NEED something every time I go in. Funny how I didn’t need it before I went into the store…

When I got into debt after college, it was because I was depressed and buying things gave me that “high”. I instantly felt better about myself as I walked around the mall with a bag of new clothes or electronics. It took a lot of soul searching to realize what was really going on and to overcome this.

It’s been a while now and I still get the urge sometimes to buy but I do exactly what you do: I walk around the store for a little bit and then finally stop, take a deep breath, and ask myself if I really need this and what benefit will I get out of it. Most times that is enough to put it back.

Wow, that was intense! A new book is so exhilarating. I remember in elementary school when they’d pass out the book fair flyers and you brought it home to see how many books your parents would let you buy that month. And then, when the boxes of books would arrive, I would eagerly await the time when the teacher would open them up and call your name. I’d have to make myself walk, not run, up there to claim those new adventures. It was such a high. I can still remember the smell of those books. Ahhhh …. Anyay, about 10 years ago I saw a pair of inline skates on a clearance shelf at Kmart. I couldn’t believe they were my size AND they were on sale for $3. $3! How could I pass that up? However, I’ve never been on inline skates in my life. They sat in my closet, year after year, never used. Why? I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to skate on them and end up hurting myself. So after a decade of them mocking me, I finally gave them away. $3 isn’t much. However, as I always told my son, “1 piece of paper weighs almost nothing, but each paper added can weigh down your backpack real fast. So all that just to say that I think you made the right decision, but I know how difficult it was. Another great post, as usual! Entertaining AND inspiring. 🙂

I’m so with you on this. I used to buy a lot of books because they were on sale, but then I discovered that the library had most of those books for free. I haven’t bought a book in I don’t know how long. I even go to the library to check out travel guides when I go on vacation.

Completely agree. We spend so much time trying to figure out how to get more money, but the biggest lesson is learning to control spending. What good is it to get more money if you are just going to spend it because you can’t control spending. After all it’s not how much you earn but how much you can save. Nice article

I am so like that to. I love the thrill of the deal. It feels good finding the deal and knowing that you won. But when I get to check out I know that I don’t really need that item, and even though its a good deal I can walk away. I love this. I totally relate

I look back at “stuff” I’ve purchased throughout my life and wonder what was wrong with me. Even though I had little money, I bought countless music CDs, expensive beers, and ordered pizza all the time in college. My mentality was that I’d just pay off my debts after college with a good job. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case and it set me back several years from a financial perspective. I’m trying to instill the frugal mindset into my children so that they do better than I did as a young adult.

Nice work. I do the same now.. if I can’t think of a good, solid reason to own something, it pains me to pass up on the deal, but I know it’s not going to do me much good. I’m the same way with free stuff now, if I don’t need it, can’t repurpose it (ie give it to someone), I won’t enter the contest or accept the swag.

Exercising that self control is great! Its hard to do, but once you know you can pass on the purchase, then you know you have achieved ultimate control. I like to keep myself busy, or remind myself I ought to research to see if I can find a better price. That helps me say no immediately to the purchase, but keep my heart happy by saying it still could happen.

Great job! It is so easy to fall in the trap of consumerism and for me too, books are a huge issue. I used to buy every book, even if I knew I’d only read it once before passing it on. Now, I take advantage of the library or borrow it from a friend to save some money and some space!