Why You Shouldn’t Settle in a Relationship

Why is it that we decide to keep ourselves in relationships that clearly aren’t “good enough” for us?

I found myself trying to answer that exact question after I came down from a baffling recent experience. Let’s call him Skip*. Skip was a great guy. He was funny, smart, driven and attractive. You know, everything a girl could want, right? That’s what I thought. However, as I continued to grow into the idea of a relationship with homeboy, there were a couple things I noticed from the get go that really bothered me:

He hated my sorority – no seriously, he said it bored him to tears in a text to one of his friends. (I learned this whole text thing down the road.)

He hated the fact that I needed time to cool down before discussing things and the fact that I would back off to let him cool down. I’m sorry what?

These things were little things though and I thought I could work through these things with him, but in reality I was just lying to myself. The final strike, when I realized I couldn’t do this anymore, was when two things happened:

He had the audacity to say to me “not everyone can have daddy’s brand new Acura” when last time I checked, I’m an independent woman and pay my own bills, buy my own things. OH. And my Acura is an ’05. K.

He got all of my friends involved in this elaborate plan and won them all over with how “great” of a guy he was and then, pulled a complete douchebag move.

What’s fascinating to me is that for a while, I honestly was ok with brushing the things that truly bothered me to the side because I wanted it to work.

But that’s just not ok.

What I took away from this situation are two vitally important things:

It’s ok not to like some things people say, do, or how they act, but you have to draw the line of what are major cons for you.

It’s not worth forcing a relationship if you are not at least 98% happy all the time or feel that you’re walking on eggshells with what you talk about or how you act.

If you’re in a similar scenario, take a step back and think about how happy you are. Are you truly happy? Or are you just settling?

Let me know your thoughts!

* name changed

Why You Shouldn’t Settle in a Relationship was last modified: March 6th, 2015 by Sam Nadolski

Sam is a twenty-something public relations professional living in Atlanta. In the office, she can be found dressed in the latest from J Crew and up to date with the latest social buzz. In her spare time she can be found having a drink on a rooftop patio with friends or sporting Lululemon on a trail run.