Living Fearlessly.

Category: Inspiration

Nineteen has always seemed like an underwhelming age to me. It isn’t a number that rings milestones like being able to drive, becoming an adult, or being able to legally drink. However, I find that I’ve never felt happier in my life to be this age.

This past year has allowed me to grow in so many different ways. Despite not reaching any societal milestones, I’ve reached so many of my own. And I’m currently in a state of gratitude.

It’s my goal this next year to remain grateful. Thankful for the challenges and obstacles. Grateful for the failures and successes. Grateful for the times where I feel empowered or the times when I feel small. Grateful for the bleak low points and for the exhilarating peaks.

I’m 19 years and counting. To some I may be young and to others I may be old. I have many lessons to learn and wisdom to gain. Nonetheless, I’ve never felt more confident or content. My whole life is ahead of me. It’s time to take on the world.

Anyone who knows me knows that I love Beyonce. So when Formation comes on, you better believe I’m gonna bust out into the full choreo on sight. Most of y’all know one of the recurring lines of the song is “cause I slay.” Long before that song, “slay” had become the upmost form of a compliment. Overused? Yes. Used incorrectly? Absolutely. Nonetheless, it is a word that denotes success, empowerment, and desirability.

So while reflecting this week I came to wonder…why does everybody have to slay in the same way? There seems to be this mindset that if someone isn’t conforming to your own preconceived notion of beauty, style, behavior, or “success” then they’re not worth anything. To me, this has bred a culture of unoriginality- one that lacks authenticity and promotes negativity.

So often I hear women denouncing and devaluing women who simply choose to prioritize different things or look a different way. So much so, that I’ve found myself trying to appease the naysayers. However, constantly trying to mold into this unnatural version of myself has left me unfulfilled. I’ve found that all of the little idiosyncrasies that I’ve tried to stifle are actually my redeeming qualities. And it’s liberating. No longer am I aspiring to be a carbon copy of someone else. Women like Tracee Ellis Ross are a reminder that our quirks are what make us appealing. So to the women who feel inadequate in a world that often promotes compliance- guess what?

Whether you want to beat your face or wear minimal makeup, dress up or dress down, be the center of attention or play a role behind the scenes, and be classy or be goofy – all of these things are valuable. Formulate the best version of yourself. Be distinctive. Keep pushing and grinding while maintaining your individuality. What others may call weird…I call innovative.

We can all slay in our own lanes.

Have any of y’all ever felt pressured to meet unrealistic standards? #ShareYourStance

XOXO

-Adeyinka

“It was when I realized I needed to stop trying to be somebody else and be myself, I actually started to own, accept, and love what I had.”

Undecided. That’s where I always found myself during deep conversations or discussions about controversial issues. I’d like to think of myself as a very impartial person. When I listen to people debate, it’s very easy for me to understand both sides of the argument. However, this always left me in a boat of uncertainty. Uncertain what I stood for, what I wanted, or what I did not want. I found myself not speaking up in small situations and soon came to realize my neutrality wasn’t due to uncertainty, it was a product of fear.

I was afraid my opinions would lead to a confrontation. I was afraid to go against the grain and stand out. I was afraid of seeming too outspoken, opinionated, or aggressive. I was afraid of being less likeable– which is crazy to me now.

What makes most of the people that I admire likeable are their opinions. Women like Oprah, Michelle Obama, and Malala Yousafzai have unwavering confidence in expressing their opinions and demanding to be heard. There’s something so remarkable about the sparkle in their eyes when they speak on their passions. They are able to use their platforms to promote growth and change, because they stand for something. So how can I make a difference if I am afraid to speak up and speak out? That’s easy, I can’t. Becoming more outspoken is inevitable. So this year I’ve vowed to be unapologetic. (one of my fave RiRi albums btw). And if that makes some people uncomfortable…well they can stay mad.

*flips hair*

I’m dedicated to Living Fearlessly and I plan on using my platform to speak out on things that are most important to me. Whether it’s healthy living, politics, or a rare disease I challenge you all to do your research, present your ideas, and let your voice be heard!

Wow. The past month has been a whirlwind. Not just academically, but also socially and emotionally. First of all, I want to apologize for going MIA for a while. But September has given me a real taste of adulthood. Balancing school, work, friends, and clubs has truly been a test for me. And although it might have been ugly and stressful – I’ve gotten through it. I’m ready to start fresh this month. New layout, new posts, and a new perspective.

On another note, I had the pleasure of attending the Women at Heart Conference recently and listen to the wonderful keynote speaker, Valorie Burton:

I’ve recently began a very fulfilling pastime: journaling. I was inspired to start journaling after reading Vanessa Michele’s post here. She made a lot of great suggestions and specifically gave me the idea to start a prayer journal, which I thought was amazing!!! Her lovely lifestyle blog is full of food, inspiration, and hair posts- you should definitely check it out. 🙂 A lot of my friends journal as well so I decided to give it a try. I found 3/4 of these journals at Marshall’s by their recommendation. After doing it only briefly, I’m already in love. It’s a great way for me to get my thoughts out and stay sane during the oh-so- stressful moments. So I thought I’d share with you all some ideas for you to journal your lives away as well.

If you didn’t know already, I celebrated my 18th birthday last week. It was a lot of fun – from spending time with family, traveling, and being surrounded by great friends. I’m honestly so blessed and grateful. One of the best parts was getting to do a photoshoot with the wonderful photographer (and great friend) : Faith Holmes. Her Instagram account is: @faithfilledframes. She is so talented and the pictures came out great. I thought I’d share some of the photos with you all!

Part 1: West Columbia

Dress: Lulu’s/ Necklace: Forever 21

Part 2: Down by the River

Hat: Forever 21/ Top: Brandy Melville/ Pants: Charlotte Russe

I hope y’all enjoyed the pictures! I am so blessed to have lived another year on this earth, and I can’t wait to grow older and gain wisdom. When are y’all’s birthdays? What’s your favorite way to spend your birthday?

xoxo

-Adeyinka

It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters in the end.

Nowadays phones are an integral part of our lives. We all know the distractions that phones can serve as, but they still have a main purpose – to make our lives easier and more efficient. With an array of apps to choose from, I’ve found some amazing ones that I would love to share with you all.

This week has flown by, and it’s great to be on the flip side. It’s a blessing to have almost gotten through another week. Life can be very stressful sometimes. When it comes to jobs, school, family, or just any normal life stuff, things can begin to get very overwhelming. But you can’t let that discourage you. I used to get very upset about little stuff and would have mental breakdowns (most college students do). However, I’ve learned to cope with life’s unexpected challenges a lot better than I used to. So I thought I would share with you all some ways to de-stress and increase your overall happiness.

I hope you’ve been having a great week following the holiday weekend. It’s crazy to think that it’s July. I was thinking about how near the new school year is! I go back to college in a little more than a month. I figured that many of y’all would be doing back to school shopping soon- whether it’s for you or your children. So the control freak in me figured I would show you some of my favorite planners. Organization is the key to keeping things straight. Whether you are juggling school, work, or children, using a planner can making things run a lot more smoothly. And if you’re anything like me, you’ll get a hint of satisfaction out of writing cute little aesthetically pleasing notes and appointments in your crisp, pristine planner. These are not the end all be all when it comes to planners! Target & Wal Mart have some awesome ones that serve their purpose for great prices (I should know I’ve used them for years). However, I have begun to like planners that have a little more detailing & style to them. They’re written in order from highest price to lowest price 🙂 So let’s get started!

Since this is my first post, I thought it would be appropriate for me to give y’all some insight as to why I decided to begin blogging. As I’m writing this, I’m still in complete awe of the fact that it is already June. We are 6 months into 2015. I know people say this every year, but WHEW! This year has flown by. And when I look back on all that has happened in my life in 6 months I am astounded. My life has done a complete 180 this year, and it has been for the better. Continue reading →

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