David Raposa: A boy band Hannah Montana. Where’s the green slime when you really need it?
[2]

Martin Skidmore: This is the fifth single by this boy band who star in a TV show of the same name. It’s not quite working – their third made #93, the others haven’t troubled the top 100. This is unsurprising.
[3]

Iain Mew: In order to understand why an American Busted should now be emerging, I looked up this band and found that a ‘television comedy music-themed teen sitcom’ is responsible. Given that comedy aspect, it seems odd that no sense of humour manifests itself in this awfully earnest and unimaginative song. Any kind of hint of personality would have been nice, in fact.
[3]

Anthony Easton: The Monkees were quite sophisticated, and worked both straight and as a joke — often at the same time. Here, the joke isn’t very clever, and they lack the harmonics of the best boy bands. I am still unconvinced of Nickelodeon’s genius.
[4]

Chuck Eddy: As recent boy bands go, these guys sound fairly bubbly and unjaded, at least for this song. Good for them, or should I be thanking Justin Bieber? (Also, does Chinese food make them sick? And do they like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch?)
[6]

Michaelangelo Matos: These guys sing the way your dad used to make fun of rap: EMphaSIS right ON the BEAT, GET the CROWD right ON its FEET. That the splutter-stomp is so ham-handedly Euro is only right. Maybe that should be DJ Ham-handed, since this is a couple glowsticks and a few BPM away from happy hardcore.
[3]

Jonathan Bogart: Unlike the Jonas Brothers, they can actually sing (and harmonize!), but that means they’re even more anonymous, a collection of stadium-rock-by-way-of-teenpop gestures that don’t add up to anything necessary or, despite all the emoting going on, urgent. You wanna be adored? Get in line, kids.
[5]