Monday, November 5, 2018

Last Piece of the Puzzle

I don't know what other creators do, but these days I like the last thing I write for a big project to be the introduction.

That might sound counter-intuitive, yet there's method to my madness! Saving the intro for last allows me to encapsulate the whole in a snapshot. If I wrote the introduction at the beginning, it would not be a true reflection because all my writing is organic, evolving as it goes. Whatever I planned on day 1 is not what happens by day 35.

Without further ado, here's a sneak peek at the introduction for the Sexual Predators PDF (available next week) that will soon be included in The Last Alpha Blue Supplement softcover (available just after Thanksgiving)...

So, you purchased this book. What now? Well, ideally, you'll use what's in here to create your own simulated reality of starships, lasers, and alien droids with spectacular boobs - far, far away from the mundane world we all know and hope to escape.

Immersion is key, after all. However, don't be fooled into thinking that an immersive experience has to be serious or boring and tedious. We should take immersion seriously, yes. But experiencing a different reality can be done while ad-riffing off the seat of our pants, quick and dirty hot-takes on what it's like to walk into a nightclub with space disco blaring and reptilian bounty hunters trying to fill out TPS reports before their Zith Lord master comes back from the restroom.

What's new in this PDF (or softcover book combined with Kobayashi Maroon)? As always, the solar winds of change keep me on my toes. Just when I think I have the geo-political and social construct models of the entire universe figured out, a Ta'arakian monkey-lizard alters the time-lines, crosses the space-lane streams, and poops in the Purple Prizm punch-bowl.

The Federation is cracking down on all manner of sexual activity in hopes of creating an egalitarian socialist utopia as inclusive, diverse, and harmless as possible. The Federation is recruiting hundreds of new planets, and they've learned you'll catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Rather than threatening to destroy their world if they refuse to join, it's just so much easier to simply promise them free education, health care, and emotional support animals. I mean, who wouldn't want a college degree, trips to the doctor, and cuddly kittens with zero personal responsibility?

The economic plan behind all of this? Tax the rich, tax the dwindling middle class, and redistribute all the wealth to these newly-established worlds. Of course, after several years of prosperity, those new planets become old planets which have to pay for newer planets joining the Federation. And so it goes...

Where was I? Oh yeah, it's a lack of sex bringing everyone down. Federation scholars believe that decades of sexual freedom has led to unhealthy levels of filthy klorians, which, in turn, give rise to independent thought, anti-authoritarianism, individualism, free-speech, and slack (self-serving, rather than merely lazy). Clamp down on the free love and what do you get? Social scientists have run extensive studies and the data reveals that sex-starved citizens are more docile, trusting, obedient, prone to outrage, and self-censor themselves so as not to offend anyone else in the Federation (comprising sextillions of lifeforms).

That means there's a random hooking-up tax, casually dating tax, booty call tax, glory hole tax, random strangers meeting in a bar tax, ordering a pizza for the sole purpose of getting it on tax, the boss wants his secretary to come into his office for a private chat tax, and so on and so forth. Ten standard months of sex-based taxation have caused sexual relations among non-committed lifeforms to plummet. And what little government-approved sex is doled out goes to either long-term relationships or is divided between marginalized groups like the 17th Gender Coalition and citizens who are only interested in sex with Zepe the cyber-prawn.

It's harder to get a piece of ass in Galaxy 5 than templars worshiping the blue god Viagra!

And yet, there are points of light in the darkness... Open rebellion against the Federation has caught fire with the outer rim territories. The Ta'andor galaxy formed its own Deplorable Republic. The space station of lust Alpha Blue just told the Federation to go fuck itself.

Unfortunately, the rest of the known universe is still very much under the Federation's thumb. Everyone is being monitored constantly, and not only monitored but graded on loyalty to the Federation's ever-changing standards and practices. Those wanting to do their own thing are considered dangerous pseudo-intellectuals, infidels (depending on how much the Federation is cozying up to the Interstellar Caliphate this week), and even space Nazis by those without any sense of history or decency.

If you can stomach the betrayal of everything our forefathers fought and died for, as well as, yet another cold shower (also taxed), then keep shuffling along with your head down and gray bowl of NPC conformity porridge outstretched so the Federation can reward your unwavering devotion with three brand-new fruit-tastic flavors... bubblegum peach, watermelon cherry, and grape prism plus!