On Yarn, Unexpected Sexy Bonuses of

I know I already posted today, but this was too good not to share. Facebook keeps showing me ads for Wish, which is either Chinese Walmart or Chinese Amazon, take your pick. From what I gather, ordering from Wish is a craps shoot. You might get the item you ordered, you might get a different item, or you might get nothing at all. I haven’t ordered yet, for that very reason, but I like to browse.

On a hunch, I searched for yarn and saw a lovely listing for the over sized yarn.

Okay, so far , so good.

Here is the description.

Let’s look at that closer…

“Makes you hotter, sexier, wilder, and more attractive.”

Clearly, I need some of this yarn ASAP.

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The female side of the BDH had fun with yarn. Several years ago, I ordered a plastic shelf. It came in two separate packages. I received the shelf and the other was in a plain brown envelope labeled in oversized capital letters ERECTION INSTRUCTIONS.

I had to Google it because I was wondering too. It seems to be a brownish color. Sometimes lighter and sometimes darker, but I’d say most were dark brown sugar colored. That would have been a waaaay better color description. 😊

Wish is from China so the description is a translation of the Chinese version. ‘Meat color’ would be the English translation of the Chinese words 肉色 (Rou Se) which literally translated means meat color but should instead be translated as ‘skin color’. ☺️

That’s great!
My best shelf instructions, I kid you not, started with “Step 1: Assemble the Shelving Unit.” There was no break-down. That was the entire instruction. (Steps 2 and 3 were optional instructions for how to anchor the unit to the wall if desired)

My daughter ordered a size L dress (she’s a 12) from Wish. She got what she ordered, but the size was, shall we say, a significantly different interpretation of a L size. It was so small, it looked like an adult size 4.

You don’t need it. At all. The advertising is terrible, like the “lose five pounds in a week with ::insert here whatever::” and you’ll be happier, more successful, etc. I know you are aware of all this, but I felt the need to insist upon it. You’ll have more fun making “fairy dust” out of glitter 😆

I have actually had some pretty good luck with WISH, but I have had one or two surprises, too. I also have said “Huh?” to some of the item descriptions. My orders were mostly costume jewelry, but a friend who ordered some clothes found the sizing was seriously off. XL in China is like a med. or small here, apparently.

The description is great, the colors are unusually humorous, but what I really love is how thick that yarn is. Take a look at that photo – yarn diameter is roughly half the size of a person’s wrist. You could make sizable items in almost no time. I’d hate to lug that skein around though.

Taobao and Alibaba are the Chinese version of amazon/ebay. There’s an English app version of Ali called Aliexpress that I shop pretty frequently at for helium character birthday balloons and kitchen gadgets (cake leveler, bento kits for kids, garlic press etc). I’ve also purchased an awesome dress with Willie Nelson’s cartoonized face on the front for my one year old for around $6(!!!!!!)

Wish, as per the hours of hilarious YouTube videos I’ve watched, is an adventure in wtfuckery 😂

Saw this while getting my gossip fix this morning and immediately thought of you. A foreign king assigning his “fugitive” sister diplomat in a country that already rejected her asylum bid in an attempt to save her from her sheikh husband… This reads like one of your Machiavellian plots 😁https://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/115885958.html

Be very careful on WISH, ROSEVILLE and other websites. Found some wonderful tops with USA full figured women, ran in XL -2X, so I am thinking wonderful, cute clothes. My sister in law brings up that she ordered and they are Chinese sizes, even thought the models on the web site are Caucasian. An OH CRAP moment. Yup, when I get the clothes, must have been a CHINESE 2x; of course you can’t send them back. Make sure you look at the reviews. Thought I did a good job of viewing before hand, but nope! LOL

We spent this past weekend at the Wisconsin Sheep and Wool Festival. OMG so much yarn. Didn’t notice any of it making any of us sexier, except possibly my husband (or am I the only one who finds it sexy when a guy is fondling yarn?), so I guess this Wish yarn is superior.

My daughter took a class there where they learned to (very gently) sort of pet the fur off of angora rabbits, then card the fur and spin it. The teacher could spin the fur DIRECTLY OFF THE RABBIT!! No joke. My daughter took a video of the rabbit sort of napping on the teacher’s lap while she gently pulled off loose fur and fed it directly into the spinning wheel. I am in awe.

I caught that too! It sounds like something that would be served during intense black-ops military training.
— Eat your meat meal, it puts hair on your chest! They don’t have ketchup in the swamps of Central America ladies!—
I’m also wondering how big this yarn is if they want you to allow for 1-3 CM in variation, hopefully that’s not in width because the quality control would have to be pretty bad for a 3cm variation in width….
As far as the “Makes you hotter, sexier, wilder, and more attractive,” apparently we all need some of this yarn, post-haste! Unless of course, it means hotter and wilder like menopausal heat flashes and emotional instability, or sexier and more attractive as in the weave will be so massirve that wearing it will be terribly revealing ;o

If yarn could make me sexier/hotter, I would be off the scales at this point considering the amount of $$ I have spent on yarn over the years. Though I presume they are implying that I should have been buying their yarn. And the marketing gods will have a different yarn that I should buy in 15 min. This cycle never ends….

I don’t know anything about yarn. I have just finished listening to Sweep of the Blade. Text to speech. Wow……. Now to listen again to Sapphire Flames. Back next to Kate. You really are the best. Thank you.

I’m pretty sure it is in the US as well since everything is in dollars, but Aliexpress is awesome! Have only had to open one dispute, easily resolved. You do need to read the descriptions (sometimes utterly bewildering, others completely hilarious) really carefully, as sizes and meaurements don’t all translate well. Also the same item can be cheaper or more expensive in numerous listings and check the reviews (also translated, and often funny but quite a lot are Russian so can turn off translate) before buying. But me and my mum love it and have been going crazy on it since January (so much stuff! She’s been home styling & DIYing, I’ve been crafting, it’s terrific).

Ha ha ha. Thank you for the chuckle. Color is defined differently by each entity. I never know what I am actually going to receive from Amazon except so far my dead tree books have been correct. Clothing is a dice roll. Parts are what I need about 75% of time. Well. Kmr powder has been correct too.
Personally I like to handle yarn because I usually have a specific project in mind ie dog clothes. Titan is a mix breed and needs a winter coat during ice storms as his natural coat is insufficient due to being a rescue pup.

I remember a scene in one of your stories when Dali and Jim go to a house with “cheerful chicken yellow paint.” Maybe the yarn is the same chicken yellow? I have to admit that I now wand to see that yarn!