DJDave, also known as David Wittman, has penned a memorable little ditty about some disturbing (not) things that go down in the Whole Foods parking lot for affluent Angelenos picking up organic kale and Kombucha.

Posted last Sunday, the mock rage-rapper’s hip hop YouTube video “Whole Foods Parking Lot” has gone viral. Even Whole Foods appreciates the humor in a song that pokes fun at the culinary cliches of shoppers in Santa Monica, Venice, and, um, elsewhere, who can afford to spend 80 bucks for six things.

The 37-year-old former Berkeley boy, works as a commercial composer for Elias Arts, crafting catchy tunes for clients like Budweiser, Pepsi, and Haagen Dazs.

Wittman also composes film scores. But he wanted a place where he could create personal projects not destined for commercial use. So he and his like-minded friends formed the artist collective Fog and Smog Films, comprised of film editors, composers, producers, deejays, designers, and such from the Bay Area and Los Angeles. “Whole Foods Parking Lot” is their first collaboration; Wittman created, produced, and performs in the piece.

What inspired you to make this music video?

It’s completely born out of my own experience, this is what I do on a regular basis: I drive my Prius through the Whole Foods parking lot in Santa Monica and I live this ridiculously mannered West L.A. lifestyle, and I’m usually thinking about what I’m picking up for dinner that night.

And then someone comes up and takes my parking space and it’s like: “Oh, really? It’s about to get REAL in the Whole Foods parking lot man.”

It’s making fun of that and putting it in perspective. We all get really frustrated or stressed out by silly things. I wanted to show the craziness of that in our lives.

I started singing to myself about it and then I found a beat that works that is fun but has this aggressive little tone. And one day I just sat down and wrote it in less than 20 minutes.

Can you tell me some of your musical influences?

I grew up in the Bay Area going to Cazadero Music Camp in the summer, which had a huge impact on me. I started learning to dj there when I was 10. The Berkeley High Jazz Band was another big influence. I deejayed a lot at house parties when I was at Berkeley High and then later at UCLA, that’s where my moniker comes from.

In terms of hip hop, I listened to a lot of the standard names coming out of New York in the 80s like A Tribe Called Quest, De La Soul, Mos Def, Rakim. I’ve listened to my share of Snoop Dog; there’s a creeping up quality to this song that’s a nod to Snoop.

What about your food influences?

I’m not a foodie. I like fresh food. But I don’t go crazy about the whole organic, local thing. I just try to eat well. I definitely started eating better once my fiancee moved in. The editor on this clip, Jake Pushinsky, is into food and restaurants, and comes from the food and beverage industry. He used to work at Hawthorne Lane.

Did you expect this video to be as successful as it’s been?

I knew it was funny so I would have been disappointed if only 19 people listened to it or even 900 people. I wanted to see what viral looked like. We’re up around the 500,000 mark now. What I didn’t expect: Fielding calls from agents and the “Today Show.”

What’s your favorite rhyme from the song?

You’re the most annoying dude I’ve ever SEEN brah
Could you PLEASE move? You’re RIGHT in front of the Quinoa.

We’re not sure. But it will be something authentic that comes out of someone’s genuine experience. We’re proud of this video because it’s an honest little slice of life.

What’s for dinner?

You know I think my fiancee and I will fire up the grill and we’ll have some chicken and I’ll make a kale salad and some quinoa. We might even have it with a Pinot Noir.

Lyrics:

Intro (spoken)

Yo man…
Yo I know you see me here dude!!
I’ve been waiting here like 10 minutes, man!
No, no no… this is MY parking space man.
What you need to do is put your little hybrid in reverse,
And go out the way you came in.
WHAT?!?!
Yo its about to get REAL in the Whole Foods parking lot man…

Chorus (with feeling)

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
I got my STEEL and you know it gets sparked a lot
Im on my grind homie… It’s on my mind homie!
These fools with clip boards are lookin’ at me like they know me!

It’s getting’ REAL in the Whole Foods Parking Lot
You know the DEAL with the little shopping carts they got…
Check out what I say, it happens every day…
It’s how we LIVE on the west side of LA!!

Verse 1

… Im ridin’ slow in my Prius…
all leather, tinted windows… you cant see us!!
Everybody’s trying to park, you can feel the tension
I’m in electric mode… can’t even hear the engine (Shhhhhhh)

Just then I saw a spot open up,
My timings perfect… Im creepin’ up…
But then this other dude tried to steal it going the wrong way
Yo man, I’ve had a LONG DAY!

Chorus
(same as before)

Verse 2

Now I’m on this inside, looking at my list
Organic chicken, Kale Salad and a Lemon Twist.
Some girl in yoga pants is lookin at me funny
I’m just trying to find a decent Pinot Noir for under twenty!

Then I take it to the cheese counter, Humboldt Fog?
We just ran out sir! Really Dog?
Take it easy man, I try to calm myself…
I’ve been on edge ever since they took Kombucha off the shelf…

Chorus

(same as before)

Verse 3

This Busters on his iPhone talking to his friends,
Picking up some cayenne pepper for his master cleanse.
You’re the most annoying dude I’ve ever SEEN brah…
Could you PLEASE move? You’re RIGHT in front of the Quinoa.

Damn, I’m about to check out.
Pay my 80 bucks for 6 things and get the heck out.
The express lane is moving hella slow…
Man, these fools don’t know… that shit is getting REAL….

Thanks for the background about this funny video Sarah! I admire anyone who rhymes “quinoa” so gracefully, good to get the story on the creators.

Shely

Hilarious! I LOOOOOOOOVE this video. Showed it to my boys (12 & 18). They laughed hysterically too. Good job!

kj

Witteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Amalia

haha I love this video! Been singing it for three days, no lie!! I never even heard of the TJoes video, and I looked at it and it sucks- this one is cool and much more Real! Peace homey… from a Whole Foods shopper in the South side of Johnson County, KANSAS!!