I don’t see it, but apparently someone out there does…

Have you ever heard of a Santa fetish? Okay, Steve and I were talking like a month ago and he predicted that there are people out there with a Santa fetish, which frankly…um…GROSS.

And I’m not even talking like this:

We’re talking this:

or maybe more realistically, this:

Mmmm, doesn’t that look crazy delicious?

I just happened to have had breakfast with Santa at my work on Saturday morning (he was making a guest appearance) and he said that he’s had a few older women on his lap that have suggested that he’d get pretty dirty going down the chimney, and that he might need to take a hot shower with them to get all the soot off.

Seriously, hearing that come out of Santa’s mouth was like seeing a fish walk on land. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WHERE IS MRS. CLAUS???