InTouch Weekly says that Robert Pattinson and Emma Watson are doing it (possible couple name: Son²). I won’t believe it until I hear about how his crazed fans held a virtual bonfire where they all deleted their digital copies of Beauty and the Beast and the Harry Potter movies he’s not in as a protest against that home wrecking harlot Emma Watson for stealing their man. I say “virtual bonfire,” because I’m pretty sure they don’t leave the house – Celebitchy

In case you need something to talk about with your 12-year-old niece at your family Christmas party, here’s an update on Brooklyn Beckham and Chloe Grace Moretz – Lainey Gossip

How confident of Kenya Moore to think that her marriage is going to last that long – Reality Tea

I always forget that Sam Smith is just 25 (sure, he’s technically a sad old British widow in the body of a 25 year old, but he’s still 25), so I guess it was a big deal for him to go Instagram official with his American actor boyfriend. Millennials! – Towleroad

Elizabeth Vargas is leaving ABC News after 21 years. I was going to say that I hope that NBC News picks her up and replaces Megyn Kelly with her, but Elizabeth Vargas is a recovering alcoholic and I don’t know if it’s a good idea for her to inhale the clouds of chardonnay vapor blowing out of Kathie Lee Gifford’s dressing room – Just Jared

I’ll bet my weekend weed supply that the Roseanne writers will bring on some Becky-on-Becky action by making the Beckys hook up – Pajiba

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