Summary: People like Reese's, candy corn sucks, and something about candied genitalia.

Year 3 - MGoFastFood

The results have been tallied, and it's time to reveal what the MGoBoard craves when they hit the drive-thru.

Voter turnout was way up, more than doubling the votes cast in the Halloween Candy poll. However, the 487 ballots did not reach the rarefied air inhabited by the Breakfast Cereal poll's 600+ votes. In a personal victory and for the first time ever, I did not have to discard any ballots due to racist answers. Great job guys!

I hand counted the ballots, so there are probably some piddling errors, don't @ me.

Results:

Southern Evangelicals make their voices heard on yet another national vote. This one was never close, with Taco Bell and Wendy's making late runs to avoid being doubled up.

Wow, do you guys hate Burger King, to the point of 1 in 4 responses espousing disdain of BK. BK hate was the largest vote getter regardless of poll question.

Most Overrated was competitive throughout, with the top 5 chains more or less even throughout, with In-N-Out the early leader and McDonald's pulling away late.

This question received an enormous amount of unique answers obviously, so just listing the top 10. Taco Bell and McDonald's menu items led the poll collectively, but their enormous menus cannibalized their vote totals, allowing items from the comparably limited menus of In-N-Out and Chick-fil-A to dominate.

Responses:

Hi Dave.

I hadn't heard Chick-fil-A had opened locations in Canada.

Applebee's has fallen to the point that people don't even remember they are a casual dining restaurant. Damn you Millennials!

Agreed, what's her problem anyway?

You're doing it wrong. It's "All is horrible. Eat Arby's."

Thank you for taking the time to participate in my poll, Coach Meyer.

I refuse to believe the chain that gave us a commercial with Scottie Pippin dunking a sandwich could be the worst at anything.

I would make fun of this person's immaturity, but this restaurant is referred to as "ButtcracDonald's" in the Smoothitron household, or sometimes as "The ol' Buttcrack".

How did you know my college nickname?

I have nothing funny to say here. I just wanted to point out that 5 separate people, when asked to record their favorite Fast Food menu item and the chain from which it comes, just wrote the word "burger".

Summary: People like Reese's, candy corn sucks, and something about candied genitalia.

Year 3 - MGoFastFood

It's time for the 3rd installment of my divisive, food-based poll series. This time the focus is on fast food joints.

Rules:

1. Click the link and type in your answers to the following questions:

What is the best fast food chain?

What is the worst fast food chain?

What is the most overrated fast food chain?

What is your favorite fast food menu item?

I'll count up all the horrible misspelled results and post them here on Saturday before Minnesota(actually Monday it turns out) along with some notable responses. Poll ends sometime Friday evening.

2. No rules. If you want to rally the Ronald McDonald/Colonel Sanders slashfiction subreddit for votes, that's fine. The poll is set up to only accept one survey per device. if you break that to rig a dumb poll like this, it says a lot about you.

3. I don't care how you or anyone else defines a fast food restaurant. If it's a fast food restaurant to you, go ahead and put it in the poll.

The most eagerly anticipated Michigan event this week is finally here! It's time to reveal what Halloween candy the MGoBoard most enjoyed to gluttonously shove in their collective maw.

There was a total of 199 responses, down significantly from the cereal vote last year, probably because millennials have terrible voter turnout. 6 of the ballots were either unfunny or offensive joke ballots, and were thrown out. Limiting the results further, I didn't read the fine print on SurveyMonkey limiting their free version poll to 100 responses. 20 people voted before I was able to set up a second poll, and SurveyMonkey won't show me those results unless I pay them, like, $25. Those responses are unfortunately lost to the mists. If someone wants to give me $25 to reveal the lost results, I'll be happy to completely fabricate 20 ballots and use your money to buy myself something nice.

I hand counted the ballots, so there are probably some piddling errors, don't @ me.
On to the Results:

The "Best Candy" vote was by far the most lopsided result, with Reese's Cups taking nearly a 3rd of the votes. Snickers and Skittles were the only other candies to garner double-digit votes.

Another overwhelming victory in the "Worst Candy" vote. Candy Corn ran away with it after a brief back-and-forth with Tootsie Rolls. For the uninitiated, Peanut Butter Kisses are those weird Grandma candies in the orange and black wrappers.

This was a real barnburner, and I expect bitter litigation to erupt in the aftermath. Candy Corn won a plurality. On the other hand, it overwhelmingly won the worst candy vote and barely received a mention in the best candy vote, so interpret the results as you see fit.

This shows the MGoBoard's hipster roots. Everybody had their own most underrated candy that you've probably never heard of. 100 Grand and Almond Joy were the only candies able to cobble together double-digit votes, with Starburst and Twix close behind.

Responses:

Nailed it.

Sometimes the look of crushing disappointment on the faces of eager children is all that keeps you going.

Agreed, totally played out.

I don't see what the Taylor Swift/Katy Perry feud has to do with Halloween candy.

+1 vote for Assorted Narcotics

Mrs. Johnson needs to pay closer attention to her 3rd graders when they're in the computer lab.

You found the house that didn't know it was Halloween and just gave you crap out of their cupboard.

I'm aware of Amy's reputation, but no fat shaming here please.

I don't even think they make fun-size versions of these candy bars. Why spend the money on full-size candy bars and then buy the weird ones?

It was around this time last year that I did the MGoBoard Cereal Poll(results here). I was stealing some of my kids Halloween candy while they are gone and decided to go for round 2.

Same rules as last time:

1. Click the link and type in your favorite, least favorite, most overrated, and most underrated Halloween candy and I'll count up all the horrible misspelled results and post them here on Saturday before Maryland. Poll ends Friday at 5pm.

2. No rules. If you want to rally the anthropomorphized M&Ms mascot slashfiction subreddit for votes, that's fine. The poll is set up to take one set of responses per device, if you break that to rig a dumb board poll like this, it says a lot about you.

Everyone has their own special moments. You know, the moment the light bulb goes on and you say to yourself: "Self, the Board is absolutely unreadable now."

My special moment occurred yesterday morning when I just couldn't stop myself from checking the Board (dumb, I know). My instant reaction?

YEEEEEHAW! Doom, death, despair, Ignorance, insults, opinions galore!

(I know, I know. Cool story bro. But I'm getting there.)

Tell me, MGoPeoples, when was your "Jump the Shark" moment? Did it happen back during the post-Carr coaching search days? The Fire Rodriguez days? The Fire Borges days? After Akron? After UConn? After Penn State? This weekend?

Disclaimer: This is not to say that we will never visit the board. Its simply an open discussion so people can see why some regulars stop visiting the Board and adjust accordingly. And for those of you that say "Good, stop reading. You're a douche bag anyway," I say "Fine, I will!"

I just wanted to take a quick moment to let you all know that I've stepped down as a moderator on this here Board. LSA is stepping in to pick up my slack and probably perform a much better service than I have of late.

I've been a moderator over 2 years now (!) but during past few months my outside life started to cut more and more into my personal time. Two little children, a wife, and my career now leave a lot less time for my extracurricular activities. A while back I stopped working nights - thank goodness BiSB and now JGB were there to pick up my slack - and I now find it increasingly more difficult to read through all of the threads created each day. I realized that was not fair to Brian and you all, especially after seeing what a great job JGB is doing and realizing that a full-time moderator needs to be available much more than I have been.

In addition, when BiSB rage-quit I realized that he was feeling all those same things I am without having thought about it. The Board is a great place but it just doesn't have the same feel as it used to. I can't place my fingers on it and I don't want to go negative, but it just doesn't feel the same. I'm hoping that by becoming a "normal" poster again and not moderating anymore will un-jade me. You all might or might not realize this, but being a moderator is pretty damn hard, and not-so-rewarding, work. I always took great pride in knowing that Brian and Seth appreciate our hard work at keeping the Board classy and respectable (e.g. not MLive-ish) but the wear-and-tear of the daily job is pretty tough. At least it was for me. I'll still be around to help provide damage control in case anything blows up and the Board goes crazy if they need me (kind of like BiSB is doing now).

All that said, its been a pretty entertaining run. A special thank you to: (a) FormerlyAnonymous and Brian for thinking enough of me to recommend and accept me, respectively, as someone who was worthy of my former role, (b) BiSB and JGB for being good friends and colleagues, and (c) most all of you for being respectful, patient, and understanding. With that, time for profitgoblue to make like a fetus and head out! You stay classy, internets.