I used to constantly quote the saying Due to a technical fault the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off.

It used to mean to me that although I had believed there was a light at the end of the tunnel, there isn’t, couldn’t be and never will be. I found the quote really apt. At some point it began to mean something different to me. I began to hear the beginning part of it. Rather than hearing, the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off – meaning that there is no light – I heard – due to a technical fault – there is an end, I just don’t see it. There is a light, it’s just off at the moment. When looking for the quote I came across something from 2 years or so ago.

I do know, though,
the tunnel is endless
the lights are off
blackness only
no end
ever
black
black
darker
deeper
the further I walk
the more I stumble
this tunnel used to have a light
at the end
but the light
is switched off
but
but
it’s switched off
there is a light
there is an end
it’s just that
I can’t see it
the tunnel ends
I’m nearing the end
but I don’t know it
for it’s still blackness
this journey takes me on
and on
to destinations I never wanted
to see
or hear of
but it ends
it does end
the lights may be off
the darkness persists
in sucking me down
it’s vortex
but I know
that although I can’t see it
there is an end
there is life
where I can
thrive not survive
and just be

I do know, though,
the tunnel is endless
the lights are off
blackness only
no end
ever
black
black
darker
deeper
the further I walk
the more I stumble
this tunnel used to have a light
at the end
but the light
is switched off
but
but
it’s switched off
there is a light
there is an end
it’s just that
I can’t see it
the tunnel ends
I’m nearing the end
but I don’t know it
for it’s still blackness
this journey takes me on
and on
to destinations I never wanted
to see
or hear of
but it ends
it does end
the lights may be off
the darkness persists
in sucking me down
it’s vortex
but I know
that although I can’t see it
there is an end
there is life
where I can
thrive not survive
and just be