Disclaimer: Anything I say on topics of Politics, Economics, Pychology, History, really anything not concerned with the natural sciences and mathematics and especially topics concerning human behavior and/or thoughts, that is not associated with a proper reference is pure speculation on my part.

I was planning on pillaging this ferry, but I've gone and left my cutlass in the car, and the crew won't let me back onto the car deck to get it. Health and Safety, apparently. Has the world gone mad?

Yarrrgh,

Roy.

"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks."One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)

daftbeaker wrote:How do I stop my family moaning at me when I'm rolling around on the floor?

Tell them I made you do it. I had to stop drinking, so I'm getting drunk vicariously through you. You are 'channeling' my drunkenness.

Plus, you're partly Scottish. They are your family, blame them.

"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks."One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)

daftbeaker wrote:Fecking family, if stopped fecking whining I wouldn't need to drink. It's not my fault, I just can't cope with the constant fecking complaining.

Is that close enough to jakey logic to pass?

Flawless. You are a natural at this.

You're also my best buddy, you and me, we'll sort out the world so we will. Are you looking at my pint, ya English poof?

"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical and cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." Bill Hicks."One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." Abraham Lincoln"Are you OK?" daftbeaker (<-- very good question, people should ask it more often.)

*falls over, vomits on carpet*Eit - I dur apologeeis fur mekking this thred tuu much on the insulting the Scuttish and ignoring the fecking Welsh. Arseholes. Anyway, carry on with the assorted chibbings now I'm gone

Too old to give up but too young to rest - Pete Townshend

I would rather be a rising ape than a falling angel - Sir Terry Pratchett

I has sent round thee fire brigade to put out thee flames...a more macho lookin lot I never saw afore wiv their uniforms all made of leather held together with velcro...er...come to think of it they had a funny name for a fire brigade...thee Full Monty Brigade.