Sunday, 5 November 2017

Catching up with Kelly #1

Hello and welcome to or welcome back to my blog. This post also welcome’s me back. For those unaware, I have not posted a
personal blog since July and haven’t been blogging with any regularity since
May.

I want today to give you an overview of how I am and an
insight into why I needed to take a blogging break.

I am feeling quite a bit of anxiety over writing this post.
I was on a complete high at the beginning of the year with my blog and had
found a great momentum for creating posts I was proud of. Sadly, circumstances crushed that momentum, my motivation and my confidence. I miss blogging though and desperately want to get back into
it.

For the past two years I have been fighting an injustice, it
has been a constant fight and by the summer of this year I had mentally had
enough, it had drained me and seemed to fill my every waking thought. Yet I
couldn’t blog about it and, so it was becoming almost impossible to blog about
my life authentically without mentioning it.

I couldn’t give up the fight though, I had gone so far and
had to see it through. I had hoped each month, and then each week that it would
conclude, yet it dragged on until three weeks ago.

It is thankfully now over and ended in a way that I was satisfied with. There were many times during the two years that it
looked as though it wouldn’t end satisfactorily for me at all and that has
meant I have been on an emotional rollercoaster.

As a result, I have now made the decision to spend some time
as a stay at home mum.

Health wise I am much the same as I was when I was last
blogging. If you’ve followed my blog you will know it was my intention to tackle my chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS/ME), depression and anxiety this
year with a holistic approach, focussing on nutrition, exercise and stress
management. Unfortunately, the circumstances that stopped me blogging have also
stopped my progress in these areas for the most part too.

I will write a few dedicated posts over the next couple of weeks updating you on where I am in more detail
in terms of my CFS, mental health and diet.

I pretty much gave up everything possible for a few months.

I am feeling motivated to start afresh now and still want to
bring you all along on my journey. Blogging my progress makes me feel more accountable,
keeps me on track and hopefully may be of interest to you.

I have started going to blog events again and the week before last I accepted an invite to be a guest on BBC Radio Leicester again and had a great time.

I was writing weekly blog posts for a few months earlier in
the year. I saw them as a way to keep you updated on my progress and give you a
glimpse into my life. I often see YouTubers vlog their week yet don’t often see
it in written format on blogs. If you do know of any diary type blogs, please
let me know.

I was never satisfied with the format of the diary posts. I
am instead going to start a series of these ‘Catch up’ posts and simply number
them so I can write them as and when feels best.

I will still of course also be creating other types of blog posts
too as I did before.

Three weeks ago, when my fight came to an end I was going to
buy a bottle of champagne yet when it came to it I couldn’t, it felt by doing
so I would somehow belittle the situation I had been through or that I was
somehow saying I was lucky. I just wasn’t ready. Now I am, it wasn’t lucky at
all to have been through that, yet I do feel relief it is finally over, and I
am hugely relieved that it ended satisfactorily. So today I bought that champagne
and tonight we will drink it.