Tuning you into not-the-mother wit, insight into your blindness, knowledge of your ignorance, and various and sundry profundities untold.
Basically, I'm just talking shit...

Friday, December 30, 2005

Hit On Me

Just because you put a ring on my fingerJust because you put some clothes on my back.Just because you gave me money for DecemberDoesn't mean that I have to pay you back.

You were my husband You were supposed to do the things you chose to do I loved you 'til the endAnd I'd rather die before I let my kids see.The way you hit on meThe way you hit on meEvery night I'd cry hopin' that they'd never seeThe way you hit on meThe way you hit on meThe way you hit on meHow come you hit on me? -- Syleena Johnson

I'm going to need everyone to keep their damn hands to themselves in 2006.

I'm going to need all feet to stay on the fuckin' ground in 2006.

I'm going to need people to stop choke slammin' and clotheslinin' each other in 2006.

Shit's gotta stop in 2006.

It literally sounded like "boompity, boompity, boom" out in the hallway.

What the fuck?

I looked out the peephole to see him dragging his woman down the stairs by her foot, and I'm like what now? What the fuck did she say to set your unstable ass off TO-DAY?

Nicest people on the earth, on the surface.

But honey...inside of their crib? It was Gatti v. Ward 1, 2 or 3 err'y night up in that camp.

Shit, I got tired of callin' P.G.'s finest on them. She would jet up out of their with their daughters, cuz if the cops got one look at her Rican profile, they were gon' see his bitch-slap print, and hubby was not going to pass Go, was not going to collect $200, but would go straight to jail.

Couple of hours later, she would come back, and I'd hear them in there, merrily clanging pans together.

I guess they was hungry after all that fighting.

Now I'm not usually one to be all up in nobody's business, but the next time he tried to strike up small talk in the parking lot, I asked him how his wife was.

Then gave him the .

FuckIlooklike.

He just gave me that "Nigga what" laugh, and said he'd holla.

The irony of that wasn't lost on me.

I'll holla.

If God is a just God, you sure will.

To bypass all of that, I'ma just need muthafuckas to "Just Say No" to the domestic violence in 2006. Don't hit, and don't be hit.

Chicks, stop playing the hit game. That shit ain't cute. As a matter of fact, who told you that shit was cute? Now that's the muthafucka you oughta hit!

Niggas, that wrasslin' game ya'll like to play with us? That shit ain't cute either. Reminds me too much of what you do right before you start hitting. Back your ass up offa me. If you'on wanna wrassle my 6'5", 320 lb. cousin Boo, then fuckyoulooklike wrasslin' me?

I've said it before, but it bears repeating: I'on wrassle. I'on hit. Cuz see, I'm not that ha-ha, hee-hee type person that is gonna take it light. And you're probably not gonna realize that until I heat up some cornmeal and throw it at you. See...then I'ma be a crazy bitch, and you knew I was crazy, and so on and so forth...

Some people don't want to believe fat meat is greasy.

Stop.hitting.each.other.

So I've got bronchitis. Suppose my lungs look a little like this:

I had a sharp pain under my left breast on Tuesday, and I 'clare for God, I thought I was up OUTTA here.

The next morning, I went straight to the doctor, only to have him tell me that I had bronchitis.

Besides the fact that this series reeks of latent paternalism, I found it quite interesting that this Brit man takes what...6 or 7 weeks out of his life to go hang out with the natives in various parts of the world.

The episode that sold me? The one where he spent over a month with the Suri people of Ethiopia.

The women are known to wear clay plates in their bottom lips, with their bottom 4 teeth knocked out so food can slide down the plate into their mouths. How practical!

The men have elongated earlobes and walk around with their manhood swinging merrily in the breeze.

it was good of you to dedicate this post to this issue... everytime i think of the countless women in our society who are victim of an abusive male/female spouse, my heart becomes heavey.... as a student of political science, the most immediate solution i see to it is better government enforcement of existing laws that make it a crime to abuse women...and of course the creation of more far-reaching laws... i think that it is the "state" that has the power to vindicate women their oppression...

hate to take my comment away from your post, but why on earth would better gov't enforcement be the best solution? Seems like we'd get more mileage out of noticing and correcting violent anger in our chiddren. Or engendering in every little girl the confidence and strength she needs to go and stay gone if it happens. Our justice system, generally speaking, isn't equipped to be the 'stronger enforcement' P mentions.

But back to Nina, I'm mad at you for subjecting me to your tribal penis fantasies. Who knew one could write about these things in such great detail. Alas. Hope this New year is a good one for you. And that life brings you something you really want, or need, or both.

About Me

Box? What box? To think outside of the box, I'd have to acknowledge that there IS a box, right? Well. I'm random as hell, what can I say. Get used to it. I love kettle corn, God, Hennessey, silence, men, words, and peppermint patties...not necessarily in that order.