Kris Attfield is the author of three books: The Book of Finch, Letters to Whomever, The Eagle's Sore: A Novella and Pfhonge, The Inter-Continental Brink of Madness, Air Defence, Doorless Darts and Blaine Bananatree - a bunch of video games.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Alchemy

So, I have recently learned from a friendly commentator that the reason masturbation is wrong is because the feelings it produces are supposed to only be felt between a man and a wife --- definitely not by yourself.

So, Vaughn J Featherstone says that it is the devil who says you must give in to the sex urges, and that we must avoid the sex urges through "transmutation".

Now, I know for a fact that the sex urges in my body are caused by chemicals, hormones and even likely brain chemicals.

On my computer's dictionary, the definition of "transmute" is "change in form, nature, or substance". The example they give is "the quest to transmute lead into gold".

So, everybody, the reason that I am not saved in the celestial kingdom with a woman is because I have never figured out how to turn water into wine, I have never worked that little miracle in myself that changes these sex-urge-chemicals into something completely different.

The Church REQUIRES you to become an all-powerful-superhuman in order to be saved and to escape belittlement, but in my experience the symptoms of being an all powerful godlike superhuman are that you will be deemed to be insane, you are crazy, and you will be forced on drugs if you actually achieve anything even like that state.

I have achieved a state in my life where masturbation was no longer a problem --- but I was eventually forced onto psychiatric drugs that caused EXTREME sexual desire---- and I just have a huge difficulty with understanding how to perform alchemy and change that one substance into another substance.

That's right everyone:: alchemy is a common practise among all worthy priesthood males. They are so good at magic that they can change the chemical composition of their own bodies.

Personally, being against being forced on medications historically, I think it's a little drastic that the church would want you to medically alter your body chemistry just so you have certain feelings only with your spouse.

But yeah---- the church thinks it's so important not to feel those feelings without your spouse that you will be required to seek a medication that stops those feelings, or you are using magical powers that transmute the chemicals through alchemy.

And, of course, if I personally transmute anything I am insane, so I will be forced on more drugs --- and the drugs they force me on usually have serious effects of some sort, such as weight gain or even to cause serious sexual desire.