I have a great life and a horrible mind. This a my tug of war between healthy reality and destructive chemistry; a chronicle of my battle with treatment-resistant bipolar depression. Life doesn't always make sense, and at times trying to find the answer or solution just makes things worse. Is that the end of it? No. It's not always about the destination, it's about the journey. Here is my journey.

Biochemistry Takes the DayThe past day and a half have been an improvement. I would almost go as far to say that it is a major improvement, but I am afraid to say such a thing without knocki… Read More

There are certain aspects of my condition that I am used to. Things I even expect. Often when I begin to get depressed, my mind jumps to suicidal ideations, and I just battle that until it s… Read More

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Slow Down There.I started my next entry a few days ago and got distracted. This is nothing new. It's likely that this entry will spend some time on the back burner before e… Read More

ThingsThings have been. They were going rather well. Then, for some reason, things became less stable. It's a little difficult to try to explain. There are a lot of factors going on right no… Read More

Treatment #5 was less than exciting, so I never devoted a post to it, but #6 was definitely different.I have also decided to re-brand my future videos as "My 2nd ECT Experience," because, we… Read More

StolenI stole this title from a professor of mine. She was alluding, specifically, to politics and public policy, but it really does ring true with those suffering from mental illness. There… Read More