For every new Audi A3 saloon US model offensive, there’s a pink Lamborghini. And a truck. For every new Subaru Legacy Concept and WRX, there’s a Fiat 500 with a flared arch bodykit and a roof rack. And some more trucks.

To steer you round the newness and the oddness, here’s Top Gear’s rough guide to the Los Angeles Motor Show. Warning: contains Sharapova. And trucks.

Words and Pictures:Vijay Pattni

The Youabian Puma. It’s wider than an Audi Q7, much, much longer than a LWB Mercedes S-Class, and tall enough to shield a small platoon. It’s also got a 7.0-litre V8 producing 505bhp (that’ll be Chevy’s V8, then), a 0-60mph time of 5.9 seconds, 44-inch tyres and 20-inch chrome wheels. Holy mother of God.

Camaro Z28 does the ‘snow plough’. It’s not what you think. Just look at that splitter.

The Galpin Auto Sports GTR1: a 1,000bhp, 225mph supercar built by chaps who run MTV’s Pimp My Ride. It’s based on the Ford GT, with a pair of turbos in place of the 5.4-litre V8’s supercharger. Will cost you over $1 million.

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