So I woke up 5:30am Sunday morning, stomach in knots, and pretty anxiety-ridden. This upcoming week is a big one. I just launched The Erica Diamond Jewelry Collection for Ice, I’m missing back to school on Wednesday to shoot a TV segment out of town, and just the mommyhood, wifehood and life duties swirled around in my already cluttered brain. Perhaps you can relate to a frenetic pace as back to school approaches, work deadlines creep up, bills have to get paid, food has to make its way into your fridge, and laundry has to somehow magically get done. Perhaps you have a supportive partner who helps out. Perhaps you’re doing it alone.

I actually tweeted about my anxious state yesterday morning, and someone told me to try taking pills. Well, I don’t even take an Advil for a headache so that wouldn’t go over well. I did however, do yoga, then push-ups, then dips, then 2-minute planks, then ate a great healthy breakfast, and by 9:30, I was seriously 90% better. No joke. And a light-bulb went off in my brain, an ‘AHA moment,’… we are SO MUCH IN CONTROL OF OURSELVES AND OUR LIVES. We are in control of our health, our well-being, our mental state, our marriage, our children. Everything. It’s up to us to give ourselves the best life possible. No one else can do it for us, and truth is, it’s best when we can do it for ourselves. It was a powerful realization.

When you think about it, there are really 4 areas in our lives that get cluttered… our minds, our bodies, our homes, and our relationships. So today, my goal is to get your brains uncluttered as the pressures of summer-ending approaches. As we get back to routine, back from vacation, and return for some, to mounting pressures, here are 21 things you can do TODAY to help calm your mind, body, physical space, and relationships. These are 21 things that I have done almost daily, for most of my life, and have helped keep me off any medication, have kept my weight in check, my relationships in order, and my house a comfortable place to live.

At the end, I’d love to hear what keeps your mind decluttered and stress-free.

1. Start your day with a tall glass of lemon water. It’s a great way to flush out toxins, prevent diseases and assist in cleansing your system from impurities. Just do it. You’ll notice a difference in your skin, your body and your insides will thank you.

2. Plan your entire week on Sundays, as well as your next day on the evening prior. This can even be done in bed, by glancing at your calendar. Waking up to a surprise TO-DO list with unexpected tasks you forgot about, can be very unnerving. A simple 20 minutes to plan your next day or week has helped in every way. If I see my week is looking too full, I see what I can reschedule for a quieter time.

3. I make sure 85% of my commitments are NECESSARY COMMITMENTS. That means, I have started eliminating unnecessary commitments from my schedule. And it feels like the weight of the world has been lifted. Practice the art of saying “no” to the things that don’t bring you happiness and fulfillment. If you’re at your human pretzel threshold, well, that won’t serve you very well. Drop what’s not absolutely necessary. You’ll get over it, and maybe next “semester” will have the time.

4. Do a check-in with those you love on a daily basis if possible, if not, every second day. That means those relationships closest to you… partner, children, parents. I “check in” with my kids every single night before bed…. is something bothering them that day, did anything great happen that they wanted to share, did they learn something new? I try and do the same with my husband… although he has a tendency to be less verbal than me. 😉

5. Create a harmonious workspace. This means, at the end of EVERY day, take the time to clean up your office, your desk, so it greets your CALMLY the next morning.

6. EXERCISE – walk, run, bike, cycle, hike, spin, yoga, pilates, strength train. Commit to being physically active at least 3 times a week, for one hour. If I only have a little bit of time to work out, I run for 30 minutes, do 20 push-ups, 20 dips, and five 2-minute plank intervals. That’s all. It takes me about 48-52 minutes. I feel like a million bucks.

7. I prepare my snacks for the week on Sundays… I cut up vegetables in containers. I cut up fruit in containers. I make sure I have nuts, yogurt, hummus, cheese, peanut butter, everything accessible and CUT UP. This makes it easier when I’m hungry and want to grab junk snacks.

8. Which leads us to…Dejunk your fridge and pantry. Just STOP buying crap for your house. I don’t buy diet soda, I don’t buy any chocolate, rarely buy ice cream. Yes, I buy a few of the “healthier” cookies and some chips, but overall, my house is healthy. I let cheats be OUT OF THE HOUSE. I don’t let cheats be PART of the house. Junk food will kill you. I swear it.

9. Schedule time for your girlfriends. Once a month… commit to lunch, coffee, dinner with one friend, or five. Your girlfriends are necessary parts of your existence… make time for them and stop making excuses. It’s like the gym… you don’t think you have the time, but you’re never sorry after you go.

10. Soak in a nightly bath and make a cup of herbal tea. After my kids go to bed, even before my husband gets my attention, I take 45 minutes to myself almost nightly. I take a NIGHTLY HOT BATH, and finish with a warm soothing cup of organic detox tea. It sets my mood for the evening and helps calm and sooth me. It’s my daily MUST-DO.

11. Stop procrastinating. NO more excuses. BUDGET YOUR TIME. Use a calendar. Don’t leave things ’till the last minute. Keep your inbox clean and updated. Stop letting things pile up. Commit to taking an afternoon in the next week, and CLEAN HOUSE.

12. Volunteer. Just volunteer. When you can. If you don’t have a lot of free time, don’t put a rigid schedule to it. Find something meaningful, such a s meals on wheels, where you can call at the last minute and help out. Helping someone in need is absolutely rewarding and a wonderful way to unclutter yourself.

13. Get 30-45 minutes of fresh air outside, 7 DAYS A WEEK, 365 days a year. NO EXCUSES. I walk outside in the winter. I sit on my deck and let the vitamin D soak on my skin. A person needs OUT. If you work in an office all day, keep those running shoes handy at lunchtime, and head out for a power walk.

14. Stop trying to keep up with the Jonses. Part of what made my first business successful, and now my blog well received, is because I NEVER TRIED KEEPING UP WITH ANYONE OTHER THAN MYSELF AND MY OWN PERSONAL BEST. I am simply always trying to do better than MYSELF, not better than anyone else. That goes for your life. Just focus on your own journey. No one has everything, so stop comparing yourself to others. Please.

15. Plan outfits, lunches, meals the night before. My kids lunches are made the night before. I even try and lay out their clothes the night before (a must if you have picky dressers). The frenetic mornings are much easier when all we have to do is get up, brush our teeth, eat breafast, and go to school. The boys get showered the night before. I grab their lunch from the fridge and we’re out the door. Starting the day off at a hectic level, doing everything from scratch, doesn’t set the tone for a calm day.

16. ROMANCE. Make time. Reconnect with your partner. Call grandparents twice a year to take your children and have A STAYCATION with your partner- that means your vacation with your partner takes place at home! Make a yummy dinner by candlelight. Regroup. Sleep in. Pamper each other. Be good to each other. This costs nothing. It only costs the gas to deliver your kids to the neighbor’s, grandparents or friends. Do it. Trust me.

17. When guilt creeps up, shoe it away. You are a woman who deserves to feel healthy, fulfilled and happy. When we run from task to task, taking zero downtown to regroup, we burn out. This is a fact, and it happened to me in 2002. Find the happy medium between giving to those around you, and learning to be still within yourself. That means taking the necessary ‘me-time’ you need to regroup, and NOT FEELING GUILTY ABOUT IT. You are entitled to thrive in all your roles, so taking time for yourself is both necessary and vital to your overall health, and mental well-being.

18. Learn to love music. Save up for a docking station that lets you play your Ipod, loudly! Do the dishes to music, fold the laundry to music… any kind of music… the music that you love… calm soothing music, R&B, hip-hop, or heavy metal! I can give you a list from here to China about the physiological benefits of music and what it does for your serotonin levels and mood. Clean the house to music. Lie in bed and have SEX to music. Music is part of my daily life and I would be dead without it.

19. Live in the moment. When you focus on the here and now, I promise, you will feel calmer. It’s a simple but powerful concept. My anxiety only sets in once my mind wanders to other moments beside the present. It takes practice, but it works.

20. SIMPLIFY. Everything. That means simplify things such as online banking. Instead of spending money on a dinner out, hire a cleaning lady to help you instead. Reduce your spending, therefore reducing any debt. Invest in ways to SIMPLIFY your life. You will feel free, and much less weighted down. Many of us thrive in chaos (bad, friends). Practice changing your ways…. keep reminding yourself the word SIMPLIFY. Simplification brings peace.

21. Read, as often as you can. A book. A magazine. A newspaper. A romance novel. But just read. Commit to reading. On certain days, read something that educates you, on other days, read something that takes your mind away for an hour. But reading is life-changing.

I would love to hear how you have decluttered your mind, body, spirit, relationships and home.

I love this piece! It is so where I am “AT” at this exact moment. When I do all the things you mentioned above my life actually feels in balance even when it’s out of whack. I putting these to do’s on my bullentin board!

Just like Holly wrote. I love your piece and it is exacrly where I am right now. I have gotten rid of the bad job and the bad people. Focusing now on myself and my family and our well-being. I love #14 – Be your OWN personal best and #18 – The music. The music is so important!!
Thanks for this blog. It hit the spot 🙂

I try to always live in the moment and I have found that to be the best thing I can do for myself. When I’m not in the moment then my mind drifts off to worrisome places and that’s when I’m most stressed. I try to do task by task and not worry about future tasks that I still have waiting for me on my “to do” list. It makes for better results and less worry. Great job Erica.

GREAT suggestions. I think the de-cluttered fridge and pantry is an overlooked, but extremely important one; we don’t ‘collect’ food– we eat it all and then go back to the store. I second the reading one, too (as a writer and library student) and while I firmly believe in having a clean desk, mine is so cluttered right now, I’m sitting in the living room instead! You’ve helped me put that one back at the top of the ‘list’. Cheers, thanks for the reminder and good luck with the new jewelry line!

Exercise and socialize – couldn’t agree more. I book time for trips to the gym into my Outlook calendar at work… and protect those timeslots fiercely! But my biggest challenge every week is how to get nutritious meals into my kids in between running home from work and heading out to their various sports commitments. So my weekend chores include meal planning, shopping and prepping… not the most fun Sunday activity, but it gives me peace of mind to know that several meals are taken care of as I head into the work week.

My tip for planning diner at night. At beginning of new season, I wrote down 36 recipes . Next to every meals I wrote down list of ingredients for my grocery list. Then , I organized them by week ( 4 weeks in a month) , including lunch for week end. This way , I never stress about what we ( me, hubby and one toddler) gonna eat or forgetting something on my grocery list. I pick all my recipes based on quick simple healthy food . Recipes that require long cooking time are done during weekend. Of course , I keep left over for lunch. And I keep myself flexible for new ideas . Look like I lot of work at the beginning , but I never ask myself what will eat tonight!

Thanks for the great post!
Agree with Brigitte, we plan meals on a weekly or bi-weekly basis in our household and make sure the ingredients are there so those arriving home first can get things started. The family works together. Planning this ahead also helps streamline grocery bills.
Also think looking to the year ahead and taking time to schedule major events (vacation, graduation, reunions, etc) is vital to not getting overwhelmed when the time comes and avoiding scheduling conflicts. A family calendar in a visible place helps everyone in a household know what’s coming up.

You have limited control of your life. For sure you can’t change on a dime. You can change some of your habits over time but that’s hard work and it takes a lot of faith about success so it rarely gets done.

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have a nice morning!