Anyone who's ever worked in retail can appreciate the genius of this 1934 "lipstick guard", designed by film studios to protect pricey costumes from the ravages of makeup stains. (One assumes removing or reapplying makeup was completely out of the question.) As you can see, it's seriously creepy-looking, somewhere between a butterfly band aid and a fortune cookie, and the ad also gives the impression that her speech is being suppressed or something. Which would have been a totally valid observation in some of our Freshman seminars. [Modern Mechanix]