In the first of four videos created by Wieden + Kennedy Portland, someone on Team Cookie has created a way to mechanically eradicate every trace of creme from his Oreos. David Neevel, a physicist (and also a W+K staffer) who has a distaste for creme so preoccupying that he apparently spent what he describes as ".04 months" on ridding it from his life, has built what looks like a supercharged mini-Rube Goldberg machine. The device severely divides each cookie in half and scrapes off the creme with extreme prejudice. A hatchet is involved.

Anyone hoping for a response from Team Creme will have to wait until the next videos come out over the next couple weeks. In the meantime, fans who take a side one way or the other are invited to express their enthusiasm on Instagram by hashtagging appropriate photos with #cookiethis or #cremethat.