Hey, remember the first installment of Yo, Susie!, in which my 18-year-old sister Susie dispensed her particular brand of sage advice in response to the mixed bag of questions put forth by you?

Well, Susie is all done with her exams now (Results next month! Keep your fingers crossed until then! Ignore the cramping!) and has been hard at work solving the mysteries of the world. Um, too bad she doesn't get paid.

"Yo, Susie! What's the best thing about being a twin? If your twin brother were a girl, I'd guess it would be because you'd have double the wardrobe. Also, how is school going? (Your mom totally isn't paying me to ask.)"

Susie says:

Yo, Over-Thinker!

The best thing about being a twin is that I have someone to play Twenty Questions with on vacation. Have you ever tried to play Twenty Questions by yourself? Not a pretty sight. Unfortunately for my twin, I'm unnaturally good at Twenty Questions (some call it a gift) and so I usually end up guessing the answer on the second question.

Now, if you were to ask me the worst thing about being a twin (which you didn't, but I don't care, I'm going to answer anyway), I'd have to say it's that people always think we're......DATING! Isn't that gross? Nowadays, a girl kicking a boy in the shin on the walk to school always means love, but I remember the days when it was simply sibling affection.

As for how school is going, thanks for asking! Since I graduated last month, school has been going nowhere and now I'm in for a laborious year of lying by the pool and making my mum bring me smoothies before I start university next September. Will it never end?

Next, "Gettin' There" asks:

"Yo, Susie! I am planning on getting a ring on the finger of my lady in the near future. I just learned that my super-bachelor friend and his lady are recently engaged, but I am planning the big event for the near future, so I have asked my friend to not let my lady know his news. My reasoning is thus: my lady will be upset that bachelor-guy is already engaged, and we are not. Then, when she gets the ring, it will look like I did it out of guilt. Am I wrong to withhold the news about my friend's engagement in order to make myself not look like a tool?"

Susie says:

Yo, Gettin' There!

Well, this is a pickle! But luckily for you, Yo Susie! has thoroughly thought it through. If I was your lady (and you were my man?) I wouldn't be the least bit concerned with a guilt-ridden proposal, as long as the ring you proffered was bigger than the one your former bachelor friend busted out. And I'm talking big. Like, Mariah Carey big. Like, let's just say this ring has to be as big as Audrina Patridge's teeth are white. And Audrina Patridge's teeth are pretty white.

After popping the question, by the way, you should smack-talk your friend as much as you can. See? No need with withold information; we ladies would rather be the latest news on the marriage front. Trust me, your super-bachelor friend's engagement will be old news once you and your lady come to town!

"Yo, Susie! For next time, could you please explain why the smart, cute girls always date the loser boys? The good guys never get the good girls, and this makes me sad. I am a high school history teacher in Japan, so if you have any questions about World War II in the middle of the night, I am online!"

Susie replies:

Yo, Kirsten!

First of all, I need to clarify what you mean by "loser" boys. If we're talking your run of the mill "nerd," as it were, then I have two words for you: The OC. Ever since Seth Cohen's cheeky face appeared on The (Former) CW, girls can't get enough of boys who like comic books and wear argyle (no offence, Sean, you rock your argyle!)

But if what you really mean is "bad boys," then the answer is as simple as this: good hair! Johnny Depp may have punched out the paparazzi with a wooden stick, but he had some seriously luscious locks while doing it. And oh, don't get me started on Jordan Catalano. Give me a long-haired man who still lives in his mother's basement over a bald investment banker any day!

If you'd like to ask Susie a question, send an email to nothing but bonfires AT gmail dot com, and put Yo Susie! in the subject line. Susie will totally answer your question in next month's post, along with a few she didn't get around to for this installment. Actually, that's a lie, she did get around to them, but Holly is tired and needs to go to bed and can't face any more copying and pasting right now. That stuff will kill you, you know.

Forget university-- I think Yo, Susie! may have a career as an advice columnist! It's obvious there are a lot of people out there (myself included) who need the brand of assistance only Yo, Susie! can provide in all of her 18-year-old wisdom.

Love 'Yo Susie'! Hysterical and a great start to my morning! I am sure that you rocked your exams (better than Seth EVER rocked his argyle!)

5

jill Jun 24, 2008

omg, susie, you have so very found your calling. these answers are perfect (and bonus—hysterical!), especially the one to gettin' there. not only does a big fat rock win, but an insanely romantic proposal story that can be told for years will forever keep GT and his lady the envy of their social circle.

keep up the fabulousness, and a huge congratulations on the graduation.

Susie, you are totally right on about the bad boys and their hair. Remember Heath Ledger in "10 Things I Hate About You"? Seriously good hair. I am still in touch with a former love from my undergrad days who had awesome hair and looked like the late rock star Jim Morrison. For all I know he's bald now, but good Lord, did I love his hair. And yeah, he was sorta bad.

Yo, Susie. I feel as though I would be remiss if I didn't point out to you that The O.C. was on Fox. I was rabidly obsessed with it as no one my age should have been, which is how I ashamedly know that piece of info. Jordan Catalano is steamy hot though, and it's the hair for sure!

Yo, Susie! is one of my very favorite things. And Susie, you are so spot on about the good hair! Luckily my guy is a good guy because I fell for his dark, curly locks IMMEDIATELY. He could have been running a meth lab in the basement and I would have looked at his hair and had trouble saying no to that second date.

I need to send a question to Yo Susie because my life is FULL of problems that need to be solved by an 18 year old girl (and I mean a different 18 yr old girl than me and, uh, many of my friends).

Man I wish I had a twin brother. That would be awesome. I'm not sure WHY exactly (although the 20 questions thing is cool) but I've always wanted a brother. And a twin (sort of) so I figure I'm just condensing them both into the one thing.