A Heated Debate Between Two Charismatic Geniuses: A Cardinal Fan (Jeff Lung) and a Tiger Fan (Allen Krause)

The Filibuster

Crippling heat in Russia, killer floods in Pakistan and, as if that
wasn’t enough, every single division race is still up in the air. Is
it me or has the world gone crazy?

Percy

Franklin, PA_______________________________

Well, Percy, I gotta admit: you sure lost me with the whole Russia and Pakistan thing. What is Pakistan anyway? Any relation to pachyderms? Or pachydermia? I think one of my sisters has pachydermia. Sores. Lots of ’em. I think…

I know that I’m a US American, man! Heck, nowadays, you can just label me as a plain, old ‘Merican. Stuff my face with apple pie, stick me in front of the tube to watch baseball, let me marry three chicks at the same time and let’s make a damn reality show out of this highfalutin awesomeness!

Has the world gone crazy?

Yes!

The world has been crazy for as long as I can remember, and it just keeps getting crazier. I mean, we live in a world where aggressive foreign policies are based on bronze age fairy-tales — a world where Kyle Farnsworth always has a job — a world where the Texas Rangers are running away with the AL Western Division title!

Of course, the world has gone crazy, Percy! Of course! Look around!

We live in a world where technocracy trumps physicality — a world where Elisabeth Hasselbeck is seen as an authority on social issues — a world where I can have 600 “friends”… without ever leaving my apartment… EVER!

Crazy?!?! More like frightening, Percy! Frightening!

Ya see, if I could have it my way I’d live on a self-serving farm, surrounded by nothing, accompanied by a sole transistor radio beaming exciting play-by-plays of men laboring in wool uniforms hundreds of miles away while I sip away on barrels of whisky.

Yeah. I think I could get by on that.

But this is 2010, Percy. And 2010 has iPods and Blagojevich and MLB.TV and Glenn Beck and Facebooks and Lady Gaga and Twitters and… and… whaddya call it? Pakistans?

Something on your mind? Want to see
Jeff and Al sweat (separately, not
together, eww)? Think you got a real stumper? Send us your Filibuster
question(s) by commenting or emailing them to us at
kraulung@gmail.com.

*Information leading to the arrest of Mr. Krause’s imaginary friend, Sal the Tiger Lovin’ Slobberer also welcome.

9 Comments

Whoa. A RSBS post that includes Pakistans, Elisabeth Hasselback and Lady Gaga? I agree – the world’s crazy!

At least you didn’t mention the JetBlue flight attendant and some minor boycott of a major retailer based in Minneapolis over a political contribution. Or, rather, Johana’s favorite show (The Hills). More evidence that the world’s crazy!

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