If I had to show you one video to describe SEC fans, one video to show you the insane nature of Alabama faithful, it would be this. A mad dash across the field to get a Nick Saban autograph. ROLL DAMN TIDE!

According to Al.com, one man arrived for the event on Wednesday. The signing was on Sunday. Something something get a job slash thanks Obama.

My favorite part of the video was the little kid outracing the fat guy at the :44 mark. That fat guy is me, basically. Except I wouldn’t run to get a Nick Saban autograph. In fact, I don’t run at all—unless if it’s for an all-you-can-eat buffet. Then I’m game. Totally.

By the way, when you set this video to “Sweet Home Alabama” it hits you in the feels. It’s all kinds of hilarity.

Saturday night my tire was low so I went to a gas station and started filling it. The air thingy was close to the sidewalk where a bus stop resided, and there was this dude angrily muttering indecipherable babble to himself.

Fucking dude turns around, and I notice his red shirt is, in fact, an Alabama shirt. He sees me and starts in, “None of this is meant atchoo! I just habbin one dem days where if I had some pistols I would become a dayn-jiss muh-fuckah! I be up close and puhsonal wit eay-buddy in the mall!”

I pretended to check my tire pressure, nodded like all was good, put the air hose back, and said simply, “I know that feel, bro. I hope your evening gets better.”

The weird thing is, fear for my life must inspire some kind of clairvoyance in me because when I checked the tire later, it was EXACTLY 33psi (recommended inflation).