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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Star Trek, red shirt..... chest buster? Aren't we getting our Sci-Fi's mixed up? Yeah, the red shirt guy is gonna die, but seriously????? That was gross and I had a hard time trying NOT to see it as something else from the male anatomy.

Bravo! Bravo! Now if only the bakers would act their age & not their shoe size. Then we wouldn't have all these Wrecks & we could party like it's 1999. I get delirious just thinking about it. We should tell those bakers that they don't have to be rich to be our baker. And they don't have to be cool to rule our bakery world, we just want their extra time in our cakes!

(With apologies to the Artist formerly known as Prince, as well as all the Wreckporters out there..)

And who crossed the streams with Star Trek:TNG and Alien? WTF?!? Not to mention the *shape*... I'm sure it's every geek's dream to get a Valentine cake like that - it just *screams* love. Literally.

What's with the alien coming out of the chest of a Star Trek uniform? The red shirt gets it again... even in the wrong sci-fi movie! That whole line up has me feeling a bit nauseated. I'll never look at raspberries the same way from now on. *urp*

Honey, I know, I know these cakes look mangyIn times we all wreck something new(That means me too)Your cake looks like a bleederBut it wasn’t meant to maim or blindI think you’re going to lose itFrom all these cakes I made that hurt your brain

I love raspberries, and I love Prince too, but wowzers, these cakes! The last one looks like intestines, and I'm not entirely sure I want to know what that is poking up out of the Star Trek hear-shaped (Pan-Wow, is that you?!) cake.

And that last cake, kids, is why the nice nurse tells you not to drink red Kool-Aid before having your colonoscopy!

Why have I never thought of frosting French bread before? Just leave off the puree…

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I was dreaming when I wrote thisForgive me if the spelling's wrongBut when I printed it this morningCould've sworn it flowed just like a songThe sauce was reddish-purple,There were berries running everywhere,Tryin' to run from the destruction,You know I didn't even care.

'Cause they say 2,000 zero zero party over, oops! Out of time!So tonight I'm gonna wreck it like it's 1999!

I was dreaming when I wrecked this,So sue me if this cake is gross.But life is just a partyAnd parties need a little fructose.Wrecks are all around us,My cake says "Prepare to hurl."So if I gotta eat it,I'm gonna give these berries a swirl.

Yeah, they say 2,000 zero zero party over, oops! Out of time!So tonight I'm gonna wreck it like it's 1999!

People, let me tell you somethin'If you didn't come to puree,Don't bother knockin' on my door.I got an alien in my uniformAnd, baby, he's ready to roar.Every cake can be a bomb,We could all puke any day. But before I let that happen,I'll wreck my life away.

Oh, they say 2,000 zero zero party over, oops! Out of time!(We're runnin' out of raspberries!)So tonight I'm gonna wreck it like it's 1999!(We gonna, we gonna, oh!)

Wreck it one more time.2,000 zero zero party over, oops! Out of time! (No, no)So tonight I'm gonna wreck it like it's 1999!(We're gonna, we gonna)

I love that this entire post is tagged only as "Ewww"! Also, that first, um, cake? bloody starfish? seems to think that it is a loaf of french bread. And I'm cool with that. Sometimes denial is a good thing.

I'm currently speechless with horror from the cakes and admiration for the excellent Prince parody!! Not to mention some of your followers, Jen, created some pretty good parodies as well. Could this be your next book?

I think the Trek/Alien mashup is disgustingly brilliant. Using the <3 pan (PanWow?) to showcase the alien spawn bursting from the <3 of the redshirt, with the raspberry puree doing stand-in for bloody gore? My brain is busy playing a scene where Q apparently dies via chest-burster, freaking out assorted crew, only to sit up and say "Oh, your distress at my evident demise is so gratifying. <grabs fake alien> Here, have a bite. Vanilla pound cake with raspberry puree. Quite good, if I say so myself."

Although it's been said 12,000 times already (save me a seat in the bunker, anyone?) I'm going to agree that they shouldn't have crossed the streams with the Alien/Star Trek cake. Or if they had to, at least make the alien a little less....phallic. I didn't realize penile dentata was a thing.

But love the Prince shout out. You make Minneapolis proud! You really do!