GRE AWA Practice - GRE ARGUMENT ESSAY 173

GRE Analytical Writing Argument Essay Topic - 173

The following is a recommendation from the human resources department at Techforce Computer Company.

"Many working parents report that problems related to their childcare arrangements are a major reason for absenteeism from their jobs. Bridgewell Corporation, a tele-communications company, implemented an on-site childcare program and after one year, the company reported that unscheduled absences had declined by 25 percent. Since Techforce has had an increase in unscheduled employee absences over the past year, we should therefore implement our own on-site childcare program. The program will undoubtedly reduce our unscheduled employee absences, resulting in significantly increased productivity."

GRE AWA Analytical Writing Argument Essay Sample Solution - 173

The writer of the argument is of the view that implementing an on-site childcare program will help in reducing unscheduled employee absence from their jobs at Techforce Computer Company. However, in believing so, the writer is highly mistaken since there are a number of other issues that need to be taken into consideration before making any such recommendation.

Firstly, the writer does not provide enough statistics in his argument to prove his point. He does not mention the number of employees who have reported problems related to childcare arrangement as a reason of unscheduled absence from work. The writer must make a detailed study about the number of children that the employees of Techforce Computer Company have along with their ages. There must be a survey conducted to find out how many employees would prefer and benefit from such a childcare program in order to justify its implementation. It is possible that most of the employees do not have small children. Moreover, they might not require the kind of program offered by the company due to the specific needs and requirements of their children.

There is also no evidence of the fact that those who remain absent from work, from either company, remain so due to the problems related to childcare arrangements. The writer does not give a justified argument for the reader to believe that with a childcare program the unscheduled absenteeism from work would reduce. It is very likely that many of the employees remain absent due to other reasons as well. It is likely that they have health related problems, or that they have guests visiting or old people to attend to due to which they remain absent from work. It is also possible that a 25 percent decline is not a significant decline, considering that very few people in Bridgewell Corporation might remain absent due to childcare problems.

The writer fails to explain how this on-site childcare program would help its employees from work absenteeism. There can be many needs of children that need to be attended. There could be small children who need constant attention. There could be sick and unwell kids who need nursing and there could also be children who are delinquent or difficult to control and who need to be taught how to behave. Whether this on-site childcare program would cater to all these needs is not explained in the argument. It is also not clear from his account as to how the childcare will be carried out. As mentioned above, it is likely that the on-site program does not suit all working parents. If the writer wants to suggest that the children be brought to the location of work, it could rather be a nuisance to carry on such a program.

The fact that on-site childcare program in Bridgewell Corporation helped in reducing unscheduled absences of employees by 25 percent after one year could be misleading. There could be many reasons for this decline of absenteeism amongst employees of Bridgewell Corporation. It is possible that over a year, the composition of employees had changed from those who have children to those who do not have children. It is likely that those working parents who required to remain absent due to childcare one year back do not require it now because of which they do not remain absent as often. Therefore, if the employee absenteeism has declined in Bridgewell Corporation it could be due to other reasons as well.

Lastly, there is no proof of the assumption that implementing childcare programs would ultimately increase productivity since there are many factors like sincerity and work efficiency that contribute towards the productivity at work. It can therefore be said that the argument given by the writer is not logical and ignores many issues that require to be taken into consideration.