hey, this is actually as weird as it sounds, im a 24 year old woman and ive been out for 3 years now, id known i was gay for years but wanted to be totally sure before telling friends and family, a few months ago i met a man and felt an instant attraction, i paid no attention to this for obvious reasons, im openly gay and he knew this because he knows my parents, he is 49, married with a grandchild!! we got close rather quickly, nothing has happened between us other than flirting and innuendos, i dont know what to do, hes married and has a really nice family, plus im gay and dont fancy any other man! but he stayed at mine last night and i think he told me he liked me, i pretended i was asleep, this is so confusing, its worse than when i came out lol

The age gap is extreme as well, and would cause big problems in itself. Is there any chance you could be getting mixed up with father-type feelings here? (For example, if you didn't have a good relationship with your own father this man might appeal to you in that way). Do you actually desire sex with him? What do you think is going on here?

These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.

i know, i have no intention of persuing this because hes married, but yeah i do want to lol, and i have no idea, before i came out i experimented with men and women, and i never actually fancied the lads like i do with him, its weird, i didnt have a relationship with my father but im pretty sure that thats not what this is, hes a great guy but i dont look at him in that way, thanks for your post btw!!

snail wrote:The age gap is extreme as well, and would cause big problems in itself.

This is not necessarily true.My father was 24 years older than my mother,embarking on his second marriage (mothers first) and I and my brother and sister are the result.My mother pre-deceased my father by two years after a long and happy marriage,so it is quite possible,and I'm sure there are many other similar cases out there.I think "could " is perhaps a better choice than "would" !

Last edited by lidopig on Sun Sep 26, 2010 3:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Oh yes, age-gap relationships can work, but as a rule, when there is a whole generation between two people it's much harder for them to come together on equal terms. There's also the issue of children, which is a frequent problem.

These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.