Day 10: My Father’s Birthday

He would have been fifty-six years old today. I cannot believe that it has been seventeen years since I last saw his charming smile, heard his deep voice or felt his arms embrace me.

My plan was to use this space to celebrate my father’s life, but I find myself at a loss for words. I am reminded of what our pastor said at his funeral, “What good do you say about a man who chose his addictions over his family?”. The wounds that he inflicted on my young heart still run deep. I have come to realize, though, that he was a sick man who choose to seek comfort in drugs and alcohol instead of taking his pain to Yahweh Ropheka, the Lord Who Heals.

I view my father’s legacy as one of warning others what not to do with their lives. Instead of running from God, run to Him. Instead of abandoning your family, make them your first priority. Instead of drowning your troubles in a bottle, take them to the only One who can truly take them away.

My father’s life may not have amounted to much, but God has allowed the story of his death to change the lives of people all over the world.

So today, I will celebrate, Abba, God the Father in heaven.

Abba who never leaves or forsakes us.

Abba who loves with an unconditional, everlasting love.

Abba who gives good gifts to His children.

Abba who turns all things to good for those who love Him.

Abba who held a little girl in the palm of His hand and protected her through the storm, who held her in His arms as she cried herself to sleep time and time again and who is continuing to make her broken heart whole again.

So many of us carry scars left by our earthly fathers. It is my prayer, today, that you too will reach out to your Abba, Father and allow Him to comfort you in the way only a perfect father can.