I don't want to be the first person to say something. Obviously he feels the same way. Damn, this is like standing in a room with someone that you like and neither one of you can think of something to say. Oh heck with it! I'll just say hi and see what happens then. Yep, I get to be the ice breaker. Oh man is he so cute! He just sent me greetings from Canada. God, now I'm reminded of all those beer commercials on TV with the guy standing on the stage in front of a giant Canadian Flag saying "I am Canadian."

Do they really talk like that? I have never heard someone talk like that at all. Everything he's saying is so sweet and friendly. I don't think this guy has a single mean bone in his body. Mind you I wouldn't mind looking at a certain bone on his body if the chance arose.

Okay knock it off Brent, this guy's up in Canada and here you are already planning out the first time you have sex with him. But oh man is he a piece of work! Where the hell has he been all my life? And damn you Murphy for throwing a wrench into the works by having this beautiful boy born in Canada. I know it's all your fault. Everything is. You and those damn laws of yours.

I'd love the chance to be able to talk to this guy more, but he's got to get to bed. Looks like he's one of those guys who has a really early job to go to. Damn, he's got to get up at six in the morning to be at work by seven. Well, I hope that I don't have too many more closing shifts at work because I'd really love the chance to talk to this guy some more.

I think I'm really falling in love with this guy, despite how far apart we live from each other. And you know something, it's at times like this that I really hate the government. Not that I liked them to begin with, but right now, I'm really not impressed with them at all. Just think of all the thousands of people who have fallen in love between our two countries, and were able to get together, simply for the reason that they are straight and could get married.

Yeah, fate certainly doesn't like gays very much in this country because like everything else around here, this place is governed based on fear, mistrust, and prejudice. And to top it off, it looks like the damn church is butting in on our business again. You would have thought that they would have learned the last time around with the bloody Civil Rights movement that people would start to resist.

Actually, it's very typical of these jerks. They're all high-and-mighty and think they're better than everything else. I mean, have you seen the churches around here? They even have "gift shops" in them. What the hell is a church doing with a gift shop? It's just another way to scam the American public if you want to know what I think. And the stupid fools fall for it. They flock to these churches like a bunch of lemmings, all falling for the same garbage they did in the eighteen hundreds. Well fine, let them flock to these overly grand waste of space buildings. Just do the rest of us a favor and get your high and mighty religious crap out of the rest of our lives.

If there is one thing that religion is good for, it's brainwashing people into conformity. That's another thing that is ruining this country. We're supposed to be accepting and welcoming of diversity, but instead, what happens? We put pressure on these same people to conform to our standards. As if we have the right to tell someone how to live their lives.

For crying out loud, so long as they're not breaking any laws and they're not hurting anyone, I wish people would just leave them alone. You can't make someone happy by forcing something on them, they have to decide for themselves what they want out of life.

Anyways, I didn't mean to ramble on there about religion, although it is the one subject that I get really upset about. I don't believe in God as I've told you before, but I don't judge someone for believing. That's their right, and if it makes them happy, I'm all for it. What I can't stand though is the church itself. The jerks running it are so egotistical they practically believe that they are god. Get a life all you priests, ministers, and monks. Grow the hell up and stop treating your fellow man like a flock of sheep.

Okay, well, he's signed off and we've said our goodbyes. Oh it's a good thing he didn't get me started on religion, we could have been chatting away for hours on the subject and he needed to get some rest. As a matter of fact, I should too. It's late, I'm tired, and obviously cranky. Too bad I'm not going to get much of a chance to talk to him tomorrow since I have to close again, but that's okay. Any moment alone with him will be good.

Oh boy, here I go again! I really have to stop thinking about him like that. What's that? Oh shoot, I forgot to tell you his name, well it's Josh. No I'm not going to tell you his last name. It wouldn't be right, not at least until he tells me it's okay for me to tell you. Yeah, yeah, I know. It's not fair, but get over it already. I won't tell you his name any more than I would tell him yours.

Anyways, I'm heading off to bed now to catch a few winks. And who the hell came up with these slang terms anyways? Oh well, I'm too tired to care right now. Good night, and I'll see you in the morning. That is, if you're still here.

* * *

I see you're still here, well great, I just got up, but thankfully I didn't have to get up until eight o'clock. This is the only reason I like afternoon shifts. Yeah, I'm naked. Get used to it. I'm not going to put anything on if I don't have to. But hey, if you like it, then by all means, look all you want. Just give me a minute while I go take care of some business in the bathroom.

Alright, I'm back, but you know something? I still need my coffee. It might not be as early as it was yesterday when I woke up, but I'm not going to do anything today until I've got some caffeine in my system. It's a good thing I learned my lesson from yesterday and had the coffee maker all set up for this morning. All I need to do is turn it on and it'll start brewing.

There, it's on, and I can already hear the water beginning to heat up. Pretty soon I'll be on cloud nine drinking that beautiful flavor. In the mean time, I'm going to start up my computer and check my emails. Hey, what do you expect? It's a like a routine for me.

I wonder what is going to be first? My computer booting up and loading Windows, or the coffee maker brewing enough for my first cup of coffee. Ah ha! Looks like the coffee won, and that really makes me happy, though the computer was a close second.

Okay, I really have to get a new coffee maker. Bloody thing wouldn't stop brewing the coffee when I poured my first cup from the pot. Now I've got a mess to clean up, but I can't do that while it's still on, so I have to turn it off for a second. You'd think they could make things work the way they're supposed to every time I use it. It's not my fault I've had this thing since I moved to Florida from Michigan, but when you buy something, you expect it to work properly. It should be against the law for things to break down.

There, the pot is back on the burner, and I've turned the bloody thing back on. Next time I want a cup, I'll just wait till the whole thing has brewed so I don't have to clean up after it. As soon as I get paid this week, I'm getting myself a new one. It's going to be so much fun to toss this thing out into the garbage.

You know something, you could have warned me that the coffee table was sitting there. That's twice in a row I stubbed my toe against it. Ouch that hurts! It's a good thing I didn't spill my coffee though otherwise I'd be really pissed. As it is, I managed to limp my way to the computer desk and sit my butt in my chair. Would you believe the computer just managed to boot up? Well it's actually going to let me do something on it.

Internet Explorer is fired up, now I just have to log on to my email again. Whoa! These junk mail companies really do love me. I thought I had a lot yesterday but I think this takes the record. I must have almost a hundred junk emails in my box.

Well, there they go, right to the trash can. I love being able to get rid of them like that. Say what you will about junk mail, it sometimes feels good to just toss things like that away, almost poetic justice. If you ask me. Aww, poor junk mail companies, did I hurt your feelings by maliciously destroying all your hard work at sending me that stuff? Tough.

Oh yeah! Josh has sent me another email. Let's see what he's sent me this time. Oh my! I don't think you want to see this, or maybe you do depends on how you look at it. He just sent me a series of photos of him in the nude. He is totally hot! Now I know I have to meet this guy. One way or another. I wonder if he'd like to come here to Orlando.

Looks like he also sent me another email separate from these pictures. I'll open it after I save these to my computer. Heh, I should use one of them for my computer's wallpaper. Damn he knows how to pose!

This next email of his is a little more serious. Aw man, I can't believe it. His boyfriend isn't talking to him anymore. That really sucks. I mean here is this sweet sexy guy who obviously is a really cool dude, and his boyfriend won't give him the time of day. What is it with people these days? Can all they think about is their own feelings and selfishness? I guess so.

Damn, I hope he's able to find another boyfriend soon because I don't think it's going to last very much longer between those two. It seems as if he's doing all he can to keep the relationship alive, but the other person isn't even talking to him.

It makes me really sad to have to hear what he's going through, and what's even worse is that I would love to hook up with him right now and tell him that every thing is going to be okay, but no, I'm stuck down here and all I can do is talk to him by email or by MSN. Despite everything he's said to me, I can tell that really he's a very lonely guy.

Now he's telling me more about himself, and oh my god I just want to scoop him up into my arms right now! How could anyone do that to him? I don't know if I should tell you but maybe I should just so you can understand how hard this guy's had it. It looks like he was raped by another student at his school when he was younger, then in high school he had a crush on someone and was planning on asking him out when one day his crush got killed in a car accident right in front of him.

No wonder this guy's been so lonely, everything he's ever wanted in his life has been taken away from him and he's never felt the love he should have. His parents pretty much ignore him except when he doesn't do his chores or when he gets bad grades. And oh my god he's even tried to commit suicide once because he was so lonely and didn't feel like anyone cared about him.

How could anyone not love him. Screw it, I don't care how far apart we are, I'm not going to let that stop me from admitting how I'm beginning to feel about this guy. He's so sweet, and lonely, and really hot, and all he's ever wanted is someone to love him for who he was.

But how do I respond to him? You know what? I don't think I will. He needs someone right now, and I want to see if I can help him. Even if we can't be boyfriends, at least he'll know that there is someone out there that cares about him. When he gets home from work today, I'm going to talk to him for as long as he wants.

Now I just need to call work to let them know that they'll have to find someone else to cover my shift. I'm sure they'll love that, but who cares? I'm sure that they won't have any problems finding someone to fill in for me for a few hours.

Well, I never expected them to be happy about it and I'll probably get written up for it, but this guy needs someone to talk to, so work can go shove it. That means I can spend some more time freshening up and get to the store. You think I have anything good to eat in this place? Not a chance in hell. No, I have to scrape and scrounge just to get the basics, and sometimes that doesn't even last the week.

Damn Universal needs to start paying their employees more. Yeah, yeah, I know I've said it before, but I mean come on! You tell me in this day and age who can live off a measly eight dollars an hour and only work about twenty-five to thirty hours a week. Not bloody many that's for sure.

Got my shoes on, and my wallet's in my pocket. Now I just have to grab my keys and I'll be all set. Okay, where the hell did I put my keys this time? Oh yeah, I bet I left them in the shorts I was wearing yesterday. At least they'd better be there otherwise I'm going to have to tear this place apart again trying to find them. You have no idea how many times I manage to lose my keys just because I never put them in the same place twice.

Nope, they're not there, so now I get to tear this place apart. They're not under the bed, nor on my coffee table. The counter is clean for a change, and they're not in my bedroom. So where the hell did I put them? Oh for crying out loud! I have to be the most blind person on this planet. They were sitting on my computer desk the whole time. Right where I had left them after getting in last night.

Either I'm losing my mind, or some silly gnome is playing tricks on me. I'd like to believe the latter, but it's most likely the former. I wonder if I could use that excuse sometime at work? Probably not.

Gross! That's all I can say about Florida in the summer. It's so dry out here that you can't even walk out the door without having to have something to drink. It's a good thing that I grabbed my water bottle from the fridge before I stepped outside otherwise I'd be dead before I even reached the store.

That wouldn't be good. I could just see it in the paper's now; "Man dies from dehydration on way to store" That is not something I'd like to be remembered by. If I have to go, I'd prefer it to be in my bed with the guy I love holding my hands.

Oh damn, there I go thinking about Josh again. Hey, I can't help it! He's one hot guy and I would love to have him climb into bed with me. If it wasn't for the fact that he's been having such a difficult time, I'd probably send him some pictures of me naked. But he doesn't need that right now. He needs a friend, and I want to be there for him.

I know I'm falling in love with him, but I just want to see him happy. Yeah, I know. As grumpy as I sound right now you're surprised to see that I'm actually a nice guy. Well I am. There's nothing I wouldn't do to help a friend out if I could. And besides, despite the fact that the distance between us is so great, I can still reach out my hand in friendship to him. I would love to have more, but I'm not going to push for something that I know that probably wouldn't work out. We live so far apart from each other, and that in itself makes things so unfair.

Okay enough of that. I need to get my butt moving so I can eat. I don't know about you, but eating on a constant diet of cold cuts and bread isn't my idea of a good meal. Right now, I want to get some cereal. When I put the coffee in the coffee maker last night I noticed that I was almost out. If I have to go one day without my coffee, well lets just say you don't want to be around me. If you think I'm grumpy now, just you wait to see what I'm like without my daily caffeine fix.

Oh and yeah, I should probably get some more coffee. Damn, I also need to get some milk for the cereal. Well, while I'm here, I might as well get something for lunch too. I'm thinking hot dogs. Speaking of hot dogs, what the hell is it with the way they package these things? I'm sure you've noticed it before too. Each package of hot dogs contains twelve of them. But when you buy the buns, they only give you eight in the bag.

Have you ever seen the movie Father of the Bride? Well, the father in that movie played by Steve Martin had the right idea in my opinion. Though I don't think I would have gone to such extremes as he did to solve the hot dog bun to hot dog discrepancy. So listen up all you bakeries. Start packaging twelve buns per bag and not eight.

Would you believe this? Where are they getting these cashiers from? She looks almost as old as I am and yet she can't even make change from a twenty dollar bill! How the hell do these people survive? I bet they just hand people money and expect them to count it properly for them. Either they're really trusting of others or they just don't care.

Well, after several tries to get her to realized she was giving me fifteen dollars back from the twenty I gave her, and I was only supposed to get back ten, I've managed to get out of that store. The next time I'm at that store I'm going to make sure that I pick a different cashier. Like come on!

Who the hell ever made milk so heavy to carry I will never know, but they ought to be shot. Damn, I swear they fill it up so much that they're hoping the milk will tear your arm out of it's socket. Okay, so I'm exaggerating, but I am really glad that I don't live to far from here. On the other hand, why would anyone need to go out to lift weights? Just go buy a couple jugs of milk and there you go.

Back home at last! And not a moment too soon. My arm was really beginning to get tired. Not to mention my fingers. When I get inside I'm going to need to shake my hands around a bit just to get the blood to flow back into them again. Those plastic bags hurt man!

Note to retailers, would you do something about the handles in your plastic bags? Someone's going to lose their fingers one of these days. Yeah, sure, tell me to not fill the bags up so full. I've got one for you, make sure the groceries aren't so heavy so we don't have to worry about it.

Oh damn, I forgot to turn the computer off before I left the trailer. Well, I guess that just means I'm going to be paying more on my electric bill. What can I do I guess. What's done is done. Let me just put this food away and then I can get settled in front of the computer screen and do some writing. Yeah, that's right, I'm going to finally finish another chapter and make all my fans horny and happy.

Which one am I writing now? I'm not going to tell you, but I'll have it done before Josh gets back from work, which should be in another four hours I think. One thing about writing that I like so much is that it's very relaxing. I've known a few writers who literally begin to tear out their hair when they get stuck on a certain part of their stories. No wonder half of them are all going bald already. Heh, I shouldn't talk, I've been going bald for a couple years now.

So here I am sitting in front of this computer with a bowl of cereal in my lap, and with one hand busy on the keyboard pounding away at the keys, I eat my breakfast. Oh it's much faster to type with both hands like I usually do, but don't get in between me and my food. Not even writing could make me stop having a breakfast or a lunch, or a dinner. Usually I'm sitting down on the couch when I'm eating and don't even go near the computer, but today I wanted to get this story done before Josh came back online. Which according to my watch will be in just a few hours. Plenty of time I think.

That was good. It's been a while sine I've been able to enjoy a good bowl of cereal in the morning. But now it's time to get to business. I'll just put the bowl into the sink and fill it with water and then get back to my writing. I'll do the dishes later.

Having an extra day off certainly does make writing go a lot quicker. But now that I think about it, I really didn't get a day off since I had worked a double shift the day before. So no wonder my boss didn't push for me to come into work today. I bet he had that planned all along, that way he didn't have to pay me extra. Give me a double shift and "let" me take the next day off. Sneaky.

Well, that's okay, two can play at that game. I have a rule when I'm working for someone. Never let the boss think he can get away with something. A simple rule sure, but you would be surprised how many people I have seen working at Universal just let people stomp all over them. It makes me really upset that they could. Sometimes I just want to grab them by the collar and shake them a bit and demand to know why they let themselves be trampled all over. But then I figure it's none of my business and if that's how they want to let things be, that's their choice.

Wow, this chapter is taking longer than I thought to complete. It's not particularly long, but I just can't seem to get my mind focused on it today. I know what it is that is distracting me though, but there's nothing I can do about that right now. Josh will be home in another couple hours and I might as well drudge along as best I can until he comes online. Hopefully I can get this chapter done before he's home.

This chapter is certainly longer than most of the others I've done recently, so maybe that's what's bugging me about it. For those of you who do some writing, have you ever started a chapter and then just couldn't find a good place to end it so you just kept writing and writing until you force an ending? Well that's what it looks like is happening right now. Looking back at my chapter I see that I'm already on the twelfth page, and I normally only write about ten or eleven pages.

I've got to find an ending to this chapter soon or I'll never finish it. It's almost two o'clock now, and Josh will be home at about three thirty. No time to waste, I need to get this done. And I still have to proof read it before I can send it off for publishing.

Hey you know what? I think I've found it. Finally! Let me just do some proofreading and then I can save it before posting it on Nifty and my website. It's always a good feeling when I finish a chapter. I know it's just a story, but getting a chapter done always seems to bring a sense of excitement and anticipation. Every time I post a chapter I always wait for the inevitable batch of emails telling me how much they enjoyed what I've written.

Alright that's done, and it's now three thirty and Josh should be home any minute now. God I feel like a kid in a candy store waiting in line to pay for my goodies, only in this case the goodies consists of one really sexy man. Down boy! I have to keep reminding myself that he's not some prize to be won, and that he's had a really difficult life. Well, I don't care what he's gone through. When I talk to him all he's going to see is someone that really cares about him, because I do.

Again, fate has conspired against me and had this beautiful young man born in a completely different country than me. I know that had I been born in Canada, and been introduced to this guy, I would not have hesitated to ask him out and then give him as much love as I possibly could.

Holy shit! There he is! Yes! He just logged on to MSN and he's typing already. Damn this boy's fast. Here, I'll let you see the conversation.

Josh says:Hey Brent, how are you doing?
Brent says:Hey Josh, pretty good. I just finished doing some writing.
Josh says:Oh Cool! Can I read it?
Brent says:LOL! You are really anxious to read my stories aren't you?
Josh says:Well, what can I say? I love them.
Brent says:I'll send it to your email then.
Josh says:Thanks!
Brent says:So how have you been holding up today?
Josh says:I sent him another email last night. He still hasn't replied yet.
Brent says:Damn Josh, I'm really sorry. You don't deserve to be treated like that. You're a really sweet guy.
Josh says:Thanks Brent. I wish I had met you before I met my boyfriend.
Brent says:I know how you feel. I've had a couple relationships that didn't work out either.
Josh says:Hey, I thought you told me you had to work today.
Brent says:I did, but I took the day off because I wanted to be with you today.
Josh says:Aw, thanks Brent. But you still should have gone to work today.
Brent says:I know.
Josh says:ey listen, can I let you go for a bit? I need to run to the store so I can grab something to eat.
Brent says:Sure thing Josh, I'll be here, and I'll send you that chapter over while you are gone.
Josh says:Thanks Brent. Talk to you later. I love you.

Oh damn, did he just write what I thought he did? He loves me? What the hell am I going to reply to that? How can he love me already? Or is he just saying that because he likes me as a friend? And if he is falling in love with me, does this mean he's thinking of breaking up with his boyfriend?

Damn, the last thing I want him to do is to fall in love with me and then have our relationship just be some kind of rebound thing. I'm going to have to have a talk with him when he gets back online, and I certainly can't tell him that I'm beginning to have feelings for him. He needs to be able to discover how he feels on his own and for me to tell him how I feel could just cloud his judgment and then he'd rush into something he wasn't ready for.

Would you listen to me? I'm beginning to sound like an old man and his father! Nope, I'm not going to say anything. I'm just going to leave it as is, and pretend he didn't say he loved me. Oh boy. Why do I have a feeling that this is going to be a long day?