Decades Later, Leanne Kay Confronted Her Abuser and Recorded the Remarkable Conversation.

“In order to escape accountability for his crimes, the perpetrator does everything in his power to promote forgetting. If secrecy fails, the perpetrator attacks the credibility of his victim. If he cannot silence her absolutely, he tries to make sure no one listens.” ― Judith Lewis Herman, Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence – From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror

When LeAnne was 10 years old, in 1974-1975, Dural R. “Raggy” Ragsdale became the youth minister at Iuka United Methodist Church in Iuka, Mississippi. For a period of time, he lived in LeAnne’s home and proceeded to allegedly molest her between 15-20 times.

After that time, he continued to serve as a Methodist minister in Mississippi for 30 years. He also was the Director of the Wesley Foundation at Mississippi State University. Then, a few years ago, he was forced to leave his position at Porter’s Chapel UMC when he was unwilling to give up his YouTube channel where he is known as *Uncle Raggy.* At the end of this post, I’m going to ask your opinion on this YouTube channel by having you watch two episodes.

Apparently, the Statute of Limitations in Mississippi does not apply in this instance and more will be forthcoming in another post.

The Telephone Call: Must Hear

On 12/6/2002 LeAnne got up the courage to confront her alleged molester by telephone. (This is about 27 years later.) She was able to legally record the conversation since Mississippi is a one party consent state.

This is a remarkable phone call. LeAnne got up the courage to confront Raggy and he actually confesses to what he did to her. LeAnne stays strong in the call, often telling Raggy to stop talking and listen to her.

In my 10 years of blogging, I’ve never encountered such a clear recording between an alleged abuser and his incredibly brave victim.

Please take the time to listen. I promise you will not regret it. I’ve also attached a transcript of the call at the end of the post.

Uncle Raggy’s YouTube Channel

Why would a man give up his day job as a pastor instead of this YouTube channel? Here are a couple of videos. Yes, I know they’re odd. You should read the comments as well. I would like to hear your take on these.

Transcript of call

RAGGY:Yes
LEANNE:Hello
RAGGY: Hello
LEANNE:Uuuhh… who’s speaking?
RAGGY: This isD. R. Ragsdale. Who is this?
LEANNE: This is LeAnne Kay.
RAGGY: Hey LeAnne!
LEANNE:How are you doing?
RAGGY: Well, I’m doing good. What’s happening?
LEANNE: Oh…. just… living my life.
RAGGY: Well, well, well, well, maybe so…. LeAnne… Kay.
LEANNE: Yeah… you remember me?
RAGGY: You got married didn’t ya?
LEANNE: Yeah.
RAGGY: You still married?
LEANNE: Oh yeah.
RAGGY: Okay. Well, what’s your last name now?
LEANNE: Jones
RAGGY: Jones… well that’s pretty. Okay. Yeah I remember you. What’s happening?
LEANNE: How are you doing?
RAGGY: Well, what’s Chuck doing, Lynda and Charles and all that bunch?
LEANNE: Aw… they’re just… living their life.
RAGGY: Oh my goodness, what’s up? Where… where are you now?
LEANNE: Well… ummmm… I’m at my home.
RAGGY: Well your home… you’re still in Iuka?
LEANNE: No… I’m not in Iuka.
RAGGY: Where abouts?
LEANNE: Well… I was wantin’ to talk to you.
RAGGY: Umm hmm.
LEANNE: And I just wanted to… uh… say some things to you.
RAGGY: Okay.
LEANNE: And I… I know you know what I’m talking about.
RAGGY: Okay.
LEANNE: Uuuhh… uh… I remember what you did to me when I was 10 years old… I hadn’t forgotten it.
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: Uh…I wasn’t asleep.
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: Uuuhh… I pretended… over the years… that nothing happened because it was just easier than hurtin’ my mother.
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: And uuuhh… and… I just wanted to tell you that.
RAGGY: And I want to tell you… that that’s the reason I stopped coming and everything. That… that hurt me and scared me more than anything… and I loved you so much I didn’t ever want to come back and cause you any kind of…you know fear or problems again… and that’s the truth. And that just really impacted me. And yes… and I ask you and hope to pray to goodness that you will forgive that… ‘cause I told you even that night… you know that’s not something we need to do… that later on… you would find somebody… that they needed to do that…
LEANNE: Do what now? You’re, you’re, you’re… you’re way off base… what you’re startin’ to say now.
RAGGY: Well, no… what I’m saying is I remember when that was happening, and I thought goodness gracious I don’t want this to go on here… and so I told you when I sat you up before I walked out of there…
LEANNE: Walked out of where?
RAGGY: Walked out of the hall there.
LEANNE:Oh… uh…no, it happened over and over and over. It wasn’t a one-time incident.
RAGGY: Oh, no mam, it was only once.
LEANNE: No, it wasn’t. No, it wasn’t!
RAGGY: Well, anyhow, I’m so sorry and like I say…
LEANNE: Well, I’m sure you’ve lost count by now.
RAGGY: Uuuhh… no mam!
LEANNE: But bottom line, I mean… what you did was very wrong and you… you did… not just there but you would touch me… and do other things during broad daylight… out by your car.
RAGGY: LeAnne.
LEANNE: I’m not imagining these things.
RAGGY: Okay, well I’m just going to tell you… if that’s how it is then I’m so sorry and I’m asking you… and I’ve never done that with anybody… and if it’s in your heart can you forgive it?
LEANNE: Yeah… I do forgive you.
RAGGY: Well… then thank you and that’s all I’m asking and I’m so sorry and that’s one of the reasons that I… uh… stopped coming up and everything else like that ‘cause I didn’t want anything like that to happen.
LEANNE: Well… da…do you recall that when mother made the arrangements for me to stay at your home… there in Starkville… when I was visiting a friend at State… and again… I just pretended like nothing had happened ‘cause it was just easier… because as a child you’re… that’s… that’s the easiest thing and I’m sure you realize that and that’s what you prey on and what you… you exploit that innocence and that vulner… (Interrupting)… you let me talk… you let me talk please!
RAGGY: Yes mam. I’m so sorry.
LEANNE: And you exploited that innocence and that… that vulnerableness… and… and that’s what you stole from me was my innocence and my trust.
RAGGY: Well, I sure…
LEANNE: And… uh… you let me talk please!
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE:And, uuhh… when I was… probably 19 years’ old… 18-19 years’ old… and mother made the arrangements for me to stay there with you and Denise… you were married… to Denise.
RAGGY: I remember… I remember.
LEANNE: And I stayed the night there…and I was… y’all had gone to bed and uh… and I was laying on the couch watching TV… and… and… this was late at night probably midnight or so after everyone was asleep and you got up and came back in there and sat down on the couch with me. Do you remember that?
RAGGY: I remember talking to you… yes…
LEANNE: Naw…. we didn’t say a word.
RAGGY: Well… I remember
LEANNE:… because I got up and I went to… to my bedroom and I locked my door…
RAGGY: Okay.
LEANNE: …and I walked out that next morning… got my stuff and walked out… and that’s the last contact I’ll ever have with you.
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: And uh… because I knew then… there’s nothing changed about you and you can… say all the… the cute words you want to say… but bottom line… you’ve got a sick problem.
RAGGY: Honestly, honestly.
LEANNE: Naw… you let be talk… please!
RAGGY: I’m letting you talk… butI’m telling you it’s not what you think and it hasn’t happened… I promise you that.
LEANNE: Well… I remember when, uuhh, uuhh… I believe her name was uuhh… Denise… even… another Denise… and a…a Brown girl…. when they would come over and uuuhh… upset or whatever and you were supposedly our youth counselor… and guidance counselor to the youth and they would be troubled or whatever and would come over to the house and you would go back into that room where the piano is and you would turn all the lights out and counsel these girls… in the dark… now that…that doesn’t make sense to me…. I’m an intelligent person.
RAGGY: (unintelligible…)
LEANNE: And you can… you can say whatever you want to say…
RAGGY: 100% when it comes to…
LEANNE: …but do you know of any other youth pastor that ministers in a…a dark room… has to turn the lights out to minister to your… their youth?
RAGGY: No… and that’s the only time those things ever happened and never happened anything ever happened to them but that’s the way I talk to people I just didn’t look at folks… and like I say… I’m sorry that this is… this is the way it’s gone… but trust me… and believe me I swear… (hesitates) I promise you there’s never been any contact between me and any of my youth… or anything else and I…
LEANNE:Well… I know you’re covering your hind end right now and it all sounds good but bottom line’s the truth.
RAGGY: LeAnne, I’m telling you the truth.
LEANNE: The bottom line… well… uh…all that other doesn’t matter to me, what matters to me is what you did to me… and I remember vividly.
RAGGY: And I’m…
LEANNE: You don’t have to…
RAGGY: I’m sorry… if… for whatever… for however that is interpreted… I’m asking for forgiveness… please do.
LEANNE: Well it…it doesn’t take much interpretation when you stick your penis in my mouth… that’s not open for… for interpretation.
RAGGY: (with creepy shivering voice) wooooooo… sweetness.
LEANNE:And you might not… uuhh… and…
RAGGY: I am so sorry.
LEANNE: Yeah.
RAGGY: There’s no way to tell you… and whatever it is… like I say, I do… I am… grateful that you reminded me… because that… that’s something that… like I say that for years it’s haunted me like a rascal… but it wasn’t what it could have been… and that’s why I say… when I told you, you know just…you were just family… and I loved ya… and that just… just couldn’t be… and there would be a day when someone would come into your life that that would be… and could be… and… I walked…
LEANNE: We never had an adult discussion about that… we never had any… no words were ever said.
RAGGY: That self-same night when I got up from that place right there in that moment I said it to you… I looked you square… in the face
LEANNE: Naw… that’s… that’s not true… you may have wished that you had said that.
RAGGY: I did sweetie… and I didn’t wish it…
LEANNE: Naw… it happened repeatedly… it was not a one-time thing.
RAGGY: Sweetie… I only recall one time.
LEANNE: Well… I recall more than once because… I would remember more than you probably.
RAGGY: Okay… well I’m sorry then…. like I say… I’ve reached this point in my life… I’ve… my family and everything and I don’t do anything… I don’t…. fool around at all.
LEANNE: Well… I’m not here to cause you trouble with your family that’s the last thing I would want to do… not for you… for on your behalf but because of them.
RAGGY: …want to say, to… to let you know that I’m as sincere as I can be about that…
LEANNE: Well… I…
RAGGY: …and I want you to forgive that… and I want you to know that… that has never continued… ever… ever… not even once.
LEANNE: Well… I hope that it… it hasn’t… and that it’s not right now because…
RAGGY: It’s not.
LEANNE: …I want… want to tell you what it does to somebody when you do that to them… it hurts who they are. It hurts their trust.
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: And it damages that person.
RAGGY: I am…
LEANNE: And it causes great pain.
RAGGY: …so sorry.
LEANNE: And I want you to know that.
RAGGY: I know it. And I feel it. And I hurt for it. And… if there was anything that could be done to straighten it out I would do it in a heartbeat… I promise you that.
LEANNE: And you know what I think… what causes… more than anything… is a feeling of shame… that I’m not good enough… that I’m… that I’m not worthy to even to sit in a church.
RAGGY: But you are.
LEANNE: Do you know how that feels? And you’re sitting there repre… (stutter)… representing the Lord Jesus Christ…
RAGGY: Yes mam.
LEANNE: And you betrayed Him…
RAGGY: Sinner saved by grace and you’re absolutely right.
LEANNE: You betrayed Him when you did that to me.
RAGGY: I’ve been through that a thousand times with every kind of… repentance I can think of…
LEANNE: Well… that’s between you and Him.
RAGGY: Correct again… it is… and I…. that’s what I’ve told you… I have never forgotten it…will never… but it has never happened… again… I’m just telling you that…. because that’s the truth… and there’s no more or no less.
LEANNE: Well I realize there’s nothing I can do… to stop you from doing that from some (stutter)… to somebody else.
RAGGY: It will never happen again… It’s never happened again… It will not ever happen again… well I mean that’s just the truth.
LEANNE: Well, it’s just sad that… that you did that to me.

RAGGY: Well, I am so sorry and like I told you… that was the end of it and that’s why I was never coming back. I just couldn’t do it… I didn’t want to run that risk… ‘cause I was also what… 24, 25, 26… what… and like I say in those days… young is young… but I’m not young anymore… and I don’t do young and foolish things anymore… and that was the extent of it… and that’s why I say… I am so sorry and I ask you to forgive me and I trust that you can believe, well maybe not, but I can guarantee you… I did not run that risk on anybody or anything again in my entire life… ever.
LEANNE: Well… I hope you don’t because…
RAGGY: I guarantee you not… not if you could meet my children… and know my wife.
LEANNE: Well… it… it’s only… because of your children and your wife… that I da… that I don’t say more… to more people… because it’s not right… but it’s only because of Denise… and I don’t know your children… but I have my own children… and it’s… and I… I… it’s only because of them… ‘cause I don’t wanna cause them pain. And nothing that I can say or do can erase anything that you’ve done to them… or anything that you’ve done to anybody else… but you’re answerable to God for what you do.
RAGGY: Yes mam… and I stand fully… fully so… fully so… honestly.
LEANNE: ‘cause you are… sitting there now… and ever since you’ve been in a position of trust… and I want you to know how important that is.
RAGGY: I have never betrayed it since then… I promise you that.
LEANNE: Well, I don’t want to hear that again.
RAGGY: I’m just telling you the truth.
LEANNE: That… your words don’t mean anything to me… I wanna tell you that.
RAGGY: Well yours mean something to me and I’m just trying to tell you that there is forgiveness and there is repentance.
LEANNE: Oh… I know that… and I want to tell you… that I forgive you for what you did to me.
RAGGY: Thank you.
LEANNE: It doesn’t change that that hurt me… and it changed my life forever… but I do forgive you.. I don’t hold hard feelings for you… in fact, I feel sorry for you… I feel sorry for you for whatever put you in that frame of mind to even consider doing that… and I pray for you… I pray for God to bless you and your family.
RAGGY: Thank you.
LEANNE: And I don’t wish any harm on you.
RAGGY: Thank you.
LEANNE: Basically that’s all I really wanted to say to you…
RAGGY: Well thank you so much… and trust me… your words are good… they are instructional… they are wisdom… they are reminders… and there are things that… that I have never not known myself… but I’m telling you… that you can… understand… it also altered me… and I have never been the same since… and it was never a bad same… that’s one of the reasons I continued to go to Seminary… and to become a minister… and never would I hurt anybody… child… grown-up… adult… or anything… ever… but I do thank you for that… and I appreciate that you called… that you remembered… because it does… haunt my mind sometimes… and so now that you’ve forgiven me… I thank you.
LEANNE: Well… have a good day.
RAGGY: Sweetheart… you have a Merry Christmas.
LEANNE: You too.
RAGGY: Bye-bye.

I got a sick feeling watching that beautiful little girl Francine in those creepy videos. I’d like to know if this little girl is safe. And why does he have followers from around the world, places like Russia and Japan? What is he doing that attracts that audience and requires him to quit his day job?

What a total scumbag!!
How absolutely brave of LeAnne. Breaks my heart for all survivors. I do not “forgive” any perpetrator.
Their forgiveness will have to come from Christ himself bc as far as I’m concerned they are all master cons and manipulators

“Uncle Raggy’s” youtube site has 23,188 subscribers. It appears to be a guitar/ukelele tutorial website. His opening line in the few videos I skimmed was “hi kiddies and old geezers.” The videos Dee linked both show skulls highlighted in the background, which is dark for someone who was a full time minister to college students. Don’t know how much people make from youtube sites, but it can be significant, enough to replace “day job” income.

Forgiveness in LeAnne’s heart has clearly produced good fruit for her- peace and great courage. Thanks for being a strong role model Leanne to all who have suffered abuse.

Multiply this scenario by the millions, maybe billions, to comprehend the magnitude of this scourge and the endless rage and shame that plagues humanity and continues to play out globally, in wars, murders, suicides, drug addiction; destruction.
We end it by revealing EVERY twisted predator, male, female, white, brown, especially those who create laws and policies, and are in leadership roles of any kind. We end it in order to protect EVERY child, because as long as there is one sick fvcker on this planet, no child is safe.
No more damaged souls. No more wasted potential.
There is no problem that requires emergent attention more than this one. Every one of us shares the responsibility to end this.

Aside: I think every state should be one-party as far as recordings, especially as in two-party states, law enforcement officials, governmental institutions including courts, and private entities (schools) and businesses often can still record whatever they want and then produce/leak as much or as little of it on demand.

How many times have we heard this permutation of supposed apology? Not specific, leaving implication of the aggrieved’s misunderstanding of the facts and the magnitude, and so forth… This is all while the acceptance of consequences such as the basic one of stepping down from power at a church isn’t as automatic as Scripture (1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1 for starters, again repeated since so many are ready to cite or proof-text verses when they want to extract $$ or exert power and control) indicates is appropriate.

No, once again, the aggrieved has to go through the torture of reliving it, not being believed, and having to basically see if guilting the perp will have the perp acknowledge the reality of the transgression(s) at some level. Rinse, repeat.

Wow, he pulls out the ‘sinner saved by grace’ line when the fact of his, then follows it with the bit about his being young, cites the importance of his family, talks about how long ago it was… All while referring back to sweetness and sweetie. Textbook.

“have never been the same since… and it was never a bad same… that’s one of the reasons I continued to go to Seminary… and to become a minister… and never would I hurt anybody… child… grown-up… adult… or anything…”

So he went on to seminary and to become a minister when he knew full well he was nowhere near the ‘above reproach’ threshold of Titus 1 and 1 Timothy 3 (though maybe the seminary didn’t cover that part, and it was so long ago…). And how many times has the perp claim they’d never hurt anybody…

And at the end, he admits to occasional haunting heartburn over it, thanks her for forgiveness, and evidently plans to keep going and not face authorities, the church (as this was 2002, was he still gainfully employed in ministry?), or other public places given that what ‘haunts’ him is a crime?

Also, if you’re so disposed, make sure you’re not in the middle of eating something and take a look at the title of this 2011 video of his that he is recording at his ‘office’ (a church office, perhaps?):

As you know, I do not comment much on Wartburg, but I do read. As requested, I watched the two videos.

Chills…up…my…spine.

Still tingling.

Years ago I was on a Task Force investigating crimes that were committed during occult rituals. After many years, I had to step down because I found myself changing. I had become so immersed in the culture through the investigation that I needed a break just to remain sane.

I’m praying for your sanity. What’s being done is needed but what I just witnessed in this post is chilling.

So the guy’s a little strange and creepy . . . his room looks more like a satanic den than a minister’s study . . . he still likes entertaining adorable adolescent blonde girls . . . he attempts to pretend like he only remembers one of what his accuser alleges was many incidents of abuse . . . I’m sure it’s nothing.

Still . . . it would be interesting to hear from those he has ‘ministered’ to all these years, and particularly girls who grew up in his church, if his early propensities ever showed themselves. They so rarely occur only once.

I recall with some shock discovering that my former pastor had carefully coached his young children to never, ever go anywhere alone with an adult, and to scream if they touched them – even his most trusted fellow elders. If he was aware of such risk in the church – which we were completely naive to – why did he not instruct and warn the other parents he supposedly shepherded?

It really kicks off after the 10 minute mark, as he says he didn’t take drugs in those same youthful days he talks about because he was ‘chicken’ and scared to death that the authorities would catch him and expose what he did to his dad! Also just past the 16 minute mark, note in the midst of a lecture the lament of ‘hypocrisy’.

He’s “sorry”. Just a word. If he were truly sorry, he would’ve gone to her years ago, remorse, and apologized. A much different scene than what happened with this phone call.
Without repentance there should be no forgiveness.

JDV: So he went on to seminary and to become a minister when he knew full well he was nowhere near the ‘above reproach’ threshold of Titus 1 and 1 Timothy 3

And nowhere near compliance with mere laws of men, or the very most basic standards of decency in The World. It seems likely that certain folks use Titus and Timothy as checklist items (add repentance if necessary before proceeding), or magic words to make their crimes disappear.

It’s so hard to comment on something this evil. God bless and comfort Leanne, she was very courageous to make that difficult phone call and confront him, and record it! Hooray for her. By his own admission he is a vile, disgusting child abuser. And then telling her “I loved you so much” and he’s “a sinner saved by grace”. God doesn’t extend grace to defiant, hardened, depraved sickos. He *loved what he was doing so much* he didn’t care about harming and degrading a beautiful, innocent little girl. I’m very encouraged by the statement”Apparently, the Statute of Limitations in Mississippi does not apply in this instance and more will be forthcoming in another post.”

As you know, I do not comment much on Wartburg, but I do read. As requested, I watched the two videos.

Chills…up…my…spine.

Still tingling.

Years ago I was on a Task Force investigating crimes that were committed during occult rituals. After many years, I had to step down because I found myself changing. I had become so immersed in the culture through the investigation that I needed a break just to remain sane.

I’m praying for your sanity. What’s being done is needed but what I just witnessed in this post is chilling.

There’s a playlist chock full of references to pananromal activity, including supposed ‘real’ poltergeist in his own office, complete with references to a Hindu prayer bowl in his office and being located above a burial ground:

Under this video entitled “scary magic you can do”, ‘Uncle Raggy’ reveals that he was hit in the head at about 3 or 4 and as a result can’t retain pictures of anything in his brain, but that he saw pictures, portraits and graphics after mixing milk, food,coloring and detergent in a bowl:

Though the video is in between Palm Sunday services, he does it in the dark in the church office. He mentions a group of visitors including someone whose mom had apparently been in a youth group of his at Mississippi State University for eight years.

After saying that pananromal activity is happening all the time in his office (with the aforementioned visitors asking if they’re at the famous haunted cemetery, this guy says “I’m like the rest of the world when it comes to ghosts, religions, philosophies, mindsets, intellectual pursuits. I just close my eyes and pretend it isn’t happening. And, that makes it easier to live.”

Maybe it is my years being in the medical world, either thru my own life or being surrounded by the medical folks in my family: husband, daughter and son in law. I think God gave me a bit of exposure in the past to help me when I need to deal with this now.

There is a clarity about these situations that make it easier to cope. So many things in life are not black and white- merely gray. There is no gray when it comes to stuff like this.

Keep me in your prayers. I need them-especially because so many people want me to tell their stories and I want to tell their stories. But there is only one of me although there may be some help in the near future.

He thought it improtant to note that he didn’t force out those from whom he was buying a house when they had some issues, noting that he “wanted them to feel comfortable, safe, and secure”, which makes him “feel good”.

Drinking out of his YouTube mug, he states talking about moving to a new ‘studio’ in Vicksburg, and starts talking about his church — “Porters Chapel Methodist Church”. As he indicates that his YouTube endeavors have given him more pleasure than anything else he has ever done, could it be that was why he may have chosen the videos over the church position ( from which he said he was retiring the next month )?

He says at the end that “you cannot be angry at anyone who helps you achieve the greatest thing you’ve ever achieved, and I want for them the best that is possible.” This is while saying he had nothing negative to say about people who were instrumental in whatever change was occurring, as he referred to God using them for His purposes. Perhaps the professed sentiment will prevail in the current matter, though the phone call doesn’t appear to clearly evince that.

SBTS grad working as “research assistant and curriculum writer” at Louisville’s Highview Baptist is arrested at the church after he “allegedly sent sexual images” and “live streamed video of himself engaging in a sex act, to an investigator he thought was a minor.”

“Brown said the investigation eventually led detectives and secret service agents to Lynch’s place of employment, Highview Baptist Church. ‘We knew that this was the location where he was, we had enough hits from that location’.”

Highview Baptist issued a statement, assuring that: “As far as we know from the limited information we’ve received, the accusations against Nick do not involve anyone else associated with Highview Baptist Church, our school, or any of our ministries.”

Highview Baptist quickly scrubbed mentions of Lynch from its website, but still online is this account of his youth work at a Founders/9Marks church in Alabama:

TS00: I recall with some shock discovering that my former pastor had carefully coached his young children to never, ever go anywhere alone with an adult, and to scream if they touched them – even his most trusted fellow elders. If he was aware of such risk in the church – which we were completely naive to – why did he not instruct and warn the other parents he supposedly shepherded?

Lowborn Laity don’t count.

Like that pedo pastor JMJ/Christian Monist wrote about once (in the rural Bible Belt church where he grew up). It was an open secret, and when a new family with target-age kids joined, the Pious Pillars of the Church would steer them to Pastor Pedo (making long prayers for Pious justification) so he would rape THEIR kids, not mine.

These days, you gotta assume that level of Christianese Corruption until proven otherwise.
It’s the only way to be safe.

TS00: So the guy’s a little strange and creepy . . . his room looks more like a satanic den than a minister’s study . . .

I wouldn’t say “satanic den”; more like “dumb-ass grimdark goth wannabe” crossed with “PeeWee Herman wannabe with NO clue”.

Or CREEPYTOWN. That’s the general vibe I got. All he needs is a clown suit and he could do Pennywise or John Wayne Gacy. I look forward to seeing him first in the news, then on YouTube as one of Count Dankula’s “Absolute Mad Lads”.

As for all the Likes and Followers from all over the world, it’s Internet Likes. Have any of you ever SEEN a YouTube comment thread?

Headless Unicorn Guy: These days, you gotta assume that level of Christianese Corruption until proven otherwise.
It’s the only way to be safe.

With so many having business priorities as the default and the primary immutable element when push comes to shove, it does seem to make it incumbent on them to prove otherwise rather than people to assume everything is vetted to a fare-the-well on an ongoing basis. You can’t check your brain, discernment, and wisdom — which we’re called to pray to receive in abundance — at the door.

JDV: it does seem to make it incumbent on them to prove otherwise rather than people to assume everything is vetted to a fare-the-well on an ongoing basis. You can’t check your brain, discernment, and wisdom — which we’re called to pray to receive in abundance — at the door.

The truth of this has been borne down upon me in the past in fairly extreme examples, like an elder arrested for sex crimes against a child, but I was recently reminded how very important this is when I heard a pillar-of-her-church friend say that re. some problems with their new youth pastor, she really didn’t want to know because of the ties her family has with the senior pastor’s family and the dearth of other church options within driving distance. People in churches cannot assume that anyone else has their eyes on the road and their hands on the wheel.

I do not think we can discount how significant this factor is; at least as weighty as the cool bands/lightshow. I heard the same thing said by many who acknowledged they had some of my concerns with a former pastor/church. They had tried all the other churches nearby, and there simply were no more options, in their opinion.

The ‘Where else are they going to go?’ trap is very real, when people are completely brainwashed into thinking that a life built around a local church is the only legitimate life for a believer. It is very difficult to escape, and I struggle with it yet. But every time I find myself looking online at church options, I see all of the same old problems, and turn away in disgust and dread. One I saw last night has weekly ‘Pizza church’ . . . I think I’m going to join a book club or something.

TS00: people are completely brainwashed into thinking that a life built around a local church is the only legitimate life for a believer

A great multitude of believers faced with the current condition of the organized church are trying to strike the right balance between two Scriptures: “Forsake not the assembling of yourselves together” vs. “Come out of her, my people, that ye be not partakers of her sins.”

Max: I suggest you consider fly-fishing. Get outdoors in God’s creation …

Or go someplace where you can love people, with or without talking to them. Watch kids pick up the basics of a sport. Take a walk and say hi to the neighbors. Go to a music performance and look at the wonderful variety of faces. Jesus and (to a lesser extent) his disciples were always ready to love the people they saw around them.

“when people are completely brainwashed into thinking that a life built around a local church is the only legitimate life for a believer. It is very difficult to escape, and I struggle with it yet. …I think I’m going to join a book club or something.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

this reminds me of when i go to the Sierras.

i live in urbansprawl. i’m kind of buried in it, with the every-day routine of things, and just surviving. it takes deliberate action to get out of it.

It’s been a few years since i’ve been to Yosemite, Tahoe, etc, but i remember what’s it like as you climb higher, and the vistas quickly become enormous.

you can see forever across vast expanses of pristine forests and granite slabs, surely many areas where a human foot has never touched. the air is clear, clean, and cool. it’s absolute grandeur, unadulterated.

and it’s so relatively close.

the way I see it, there is a vast expanse of absolute grandeur nearby in magnificent human beings everywhere. each one like jeweled box (but the jewels are all arrayed on the inside panels, not the outside).

i could keep describing and how the boxes continually open up, but suffice it to say, there is a huge world of beauty and meaning and truth outside of the confines of any congested social locale. not far away and not hard to find. takes deliberate action to get out of the ‘safety’ of routine.

JDV: There’s a playlist chock full of references to pananromal activity, including supposed ‘real’ poltergeist in his own office, complete with references to a Hindu prayer bowl in his office and being located above a burial ground

Reality check time, because Christians are known to go off on supernatural explanations first (especially DEMONS):

All we have is Uncle Raggy(TM)s word for this.
How do we know he’s not just B.S.ing us with Spooky Stories?
There may be a ghost story connected with his office; so what?
And the “located above a burial ground” is a standard shtick of such stories.

I’ve had an interest in “Weird Sh*t” for a long time, and spend way too much time on YouTube (which has a LOT of “allegedly true” paranormal story channels – lotsa spooky stories on those). I’m getting better at spotting the creepypastas mistaken for/presented as true. One of the red flags that you’re dealing with fiction (or something that’s been fictionalized in the retelling) is “it’s too clean”; the narrative hangs together too well, without loose ends. REAL EXPERIENCES DO NOT COME SO NEATLY BOXED.

Under this video entitled “scary magic you can do”, ‘Uncle Raggy’ reveals that he was hit in the head at about 3 or 4…

That would explain a lot.
How hard did he get hit?

…and as a result can’t retain pictures of anything in his brain, but that he saw pictures, portraits and graphics after mixing milk, food,coloring and detergent in a bowl

In Magick, this is called “scrying”, divination by visions in a “scrying bowl”, crystal ball, etc.

There’s a non-supernatural psychological explanation for a lot of it; I don’t know the technical name, but it has to do with pattern recognition in the brain working overtime and “seeing things” in random patterns.

He thought it improtant to note that he didn’t force out those from whom he was buying a house when they had some issues, noting that he “wanted them to feel comfortable, safe, and secure”, which makes him “feel good”.

Drinking out of his YouTube mug, he states talking about moving to a new ‘studio’ in Vicksburg, and starts talking about his church — “Porters Chapel Methodist Church”. As he indicates that his YouTube endeavors have given him more pleasure than anything else he has ever done, could it be that was why he may have chosen the videos over the church position ( from which he said he was retiring the next month )?

He says at the end that “you cannot be angry at anyone who helps you achieve the greatest thing you’ve ever achieved, and I want for them the best that is possible.” This is while saying he had nothing negative to say about people who were instrumental in whatever change was occurring, as he referred to God using them for His purposes. Perhaps the professed sentiment will prevail in the current matter, though the phone call doesn’t appear to clearly evince that.

Oh, the bit about not having anything negative to say about anyone didn’t appear to last the month, if you go to the 5-minute mark onward of a video from May 31st 2013. Note the tone shift, which may bring into question for some what was said previously:

Apophenia is the spontaneous perception of connections and meaningfulness of unrelated phenomena. … Pareidolia is a type of illusion or misperception involving a vague or obscure stimulus being perceived as something clear and distinct.

Max: I suggest you consider fly-fishing. Get outdoors in God’s creation … even the creatures are smarter than most church folks – creation is groaning for us to get it right (Romans 8).

I’ve found that gardening is therapeutic, and it doesn’t have to be a solitary endeavor. Start more than you need and share the extras. For a number of years I’ve been sending butterfly and hummingbird attractive plants to a local social services agency. Transplanting and caring for the plants has been incorporated into their day program and the beautiful flying critters that are attracted to the plants give joy to all. It’s a small thing, but perhaps we are meant to be “care-takers of gardens.” It could become a form of community-building.

Good comments. I love gardening and have gained a valuable perspective on God via this mode of natural revelation. I rejoice over the plants that are mature and thriving and grieve for those that struggle – even finding myself giving the struggling vine extra attention.

This post was so intense and brave. People think all victims want is to somehow win in court- no, they want the abused to acknowledge the deep betrayal especially when the person was to represent Christ. Our young images of God are burned in our minds good or bad and only by the grace of God do people like this brave woman finally experienced ce some freedom. Personally I believe the surge in pornography in the church and incredible ignorance not to believe victims is a toxic combination that cannot continue. But unfortunately it is going to take a grass roots uprising to shift the paradigm – how many tragic stories do we need before change happens or is it that the church is too anemic to fight because accountability is fiction.

elastigirl: you can see forever across vast expanses of pristine forests and granite slabs, surely many areas where a human foot has never touched. the air is clear, clean, and cool. it’s absolute grandeur, unadulterated.

I hear ya’!!

And when night falls, it’s not like that gawd-awful light polluted urban sprawl where you can only see a few of the bright ones.

You get a little taste of what old Father Abraham saw.
Same with the wilds of Baja.

The people he says were involved in his dismissal/retirement from the church, who he previously indicated he had nothing negative to say about, are now framed as fools and evil.

Just past the 13 minute mark, he shares about the act of suicide that “I have reached that point more than once in my life where I thought ‘yeah, I’ll do that.’ (Shakes head no) Mm-mm. I’m too chicken. Too coward.”

From the 15 minute mark on, he talks of the effect that dishonesty can have on a young person. Despite what the phone call reveals, listen to the advice (he notes his counseling background) roll forth. At the 18 minute mark, he says the old people don’t have some of the struggles with honesty that the young do: “We’ve learned how to lie. We’ve learned how to deceive.”

At 21:45, speaking of the teenagers: “And they don’t always have somebody like Uncle Raggy, who will say ‘Come on over to my office, and let’s by God talk.’
And to really talk to them. And I do. When I get a chance, and I talk to teenagers – I’ll be honest with you, it’s not easy talking to me sometimes. When a teenager gets down there and starts crying, and whining, and pleading their case because they’re so victimized, and so misunderstood, and so hurting. (Makes sniffling noise and whiny voice:) ‘I didn’t ask to be born.’ BS!” (As he says in another video, he didn’t just use the initials. And then, there’s this:)

“I have reached across the desk at least once in front of a mother and a dad, and grabbed that teenager behind the head by the hair, and slammed his forehead down on my desk once – BAM! (makes slamming motion with left arm) – and that got his attention. And I said, ‘You didn’t only ask to be born, you sucker. You beat out four billion other potential life forms who raced down that canal. When they started racing towards that egg, sucker, you were the sperm that won the race. You got there. You went in, because you wanted to live. Now don’t give me that crying jackdockle about ‘I didn’t ask to be born.’ You demanded it, and you murdered four billion potential other human beings. Now let’s start there.’”

“Personally I believe the surge in pornography in the church and incredible ignorance not to believe victims is a toxic combination that cannot continue. But unfortunately it is going to take a grass roots uprising to shift the paradigm – how many tragic stories do we need before change happens or is it that the church is too anemic to fight because accountability is fiction.”
+++++++++++++++++++

i think gender role bull$h|t is a key factor. it is as destructive as it is ridiculous and foolish. it cannot continue, and thankfully will be shrinking until it’s a small bunker full of frightened, insecure, & miserable people who consider themselves “the faithful remnant”.

Apophenia is the spontaneous perception of connections and meaningfulness of unrelated phenomena. … Pareidolia is a type of illusion or misperception involving a vague or obscure stimulus being perceived as something clear and distinct.

He is so full of himself… he has taken down the link to this story on his youtube channel… and carried on discussing lunch with Freda. As if he’s just tip-toeing thru the tullips. DANGEROUS for a man who’s confession to raping a 10 yr old has been exposed to the world! ….

Moe:
He is so full of himself… he has taken down the link to this story on his youtube channel… and carried on discussing lunch with Freda. As if he’s just tip-toeingthru the tullips. DANGEROUS for a man who’s confession to raping a 10 yr old has been exposed to the world! ….

“THIS CAN’T RUIN ME! NOTHING CAN RUIN ME!”
— (drunken) Congressman Wilbur Mills, during his skinny-dip with a prostie in a D.C. fountain
(The resulting scandal ended his political career)

Samuel Conner: Transplanting and caring for the plants has been incorporated into their day program and the beautiful flying critters that are attracted to the plants give joy to all. It’s a small thing, but perhaps we are meant to be “care-takers of gardens.” It could become a form of community-building.

This is what pleases me most.
You kids growing up and becoming responsible…
— God —

JDV: After saying that pananromal activity is happening all the time in his office (with the aforementioned visitors asking if they’re at the famous haunted cemetery, this guy says “I’m like the rest of the world when it comes to ghosts, religions, philosophies, mindsets, intellectual pursuits. I just close my eyes and pretend it isn’t happening. And, that makes it easier to live.”

He describes using disclaimed “graphic” language in the video in question — and saying he had saved a child’s life with the selfsame video (just take his word for it; wonder if it was the one who he said he grabbed behind the head by the hair and slammed his forehead to the desk),

Still living ‘his lie’, he actually tries to make believe that it was just a ‘young act of love’. When she corrects him he moves on to the next lie. He was 24-25, she was friggin 10!! This recording and his videos should be used in a clinically setting… a classic criminal mind in high gear, running amuck!! Hurry up Authorities….!!! Stop this quickly!

JDV: After saying that pananromal activity is happening all the time in his office (with the aforementioned visitors asking if they’re at the famous haunted cemetery, this guy says “I’m like the rest of the world when it comes to ghosts, religions, philosophies, mindsets, intellectual pursuits. I just close my eyes and pretend it isn’t happening. And, that makes it easier to live.”

I call B.S. on Unca Raggy.

I’ve been in a church office (in rural PA) that’s had paranormal activity for real:
* The reputation is of “nuisance-level poltergeist activity”; like when you close up the building for the night, go across the road to the parsonage, look back and see every light in the building switched back on. Very funny.
* Once while visiting 3-4 years ago, I was in the church office when I saw something man-sized cross in front of the door at a fast walk speed. Visible for less than a second, so I couldn’t get a good look at it — just man-sized movement with no detail. Later was told this was the schpuk. Not spooky at all, just kinda weird.
* Two years ago, another visitor to that church was walking to the parking lot late at night and saw some sort of man-sized shadows moving in the fields behind the church, with nothing visible casting them. Observed from a distance for 10-15 minutes, triangulating from several angles and checking if any of the shadows could be being cast from car headlights from the road. No such luck.

And that’s my RL spook story. No dark studio rooms, no Gothy décor, nothing scary or spooky, just something weird happening, leaving no evidence behind, not repeated in my presence. So what do you do?

I’ve been in a church office (in rural PA) that’s had paranormal activity for real:
* The reputation is of “nuisance-level poltergeist activity”; like when you close up the building for the night, go across the road to the parsonage, look back and see every light in the building switched back on. Very funny.
* Once while visiting 3-4 years ago, I was in the church office when I saw something man-sized cross in front of the door at a fast walk speed. Visible for less than a second, so I couldn’t get a good look at it — just man-sized movement with no detail. Later was told this was the schpuk. Not spooky at all, just kinda weird.
* Two years ago, another visitor to that church was walking to the parking lot late at night and saw some sort of man-sized shadows moving in the fields behind the church, with nothing visible casting them. Observed from a distance for 10-15 minutes, triangulating from several angles and checking if any of the shadows could be being cast from car headlights from the road. No such luck.

And that’s my RL spook story. No dark studio rooms, no Gothy décor, nothing scary or spooky, just something weird happening, leaving no evidence behind, not repeated in my presence. So what do you do?

This silly bastard really makes my skin crawl. I’ve been around another preacher pedo that acted just like this freak. All that bullshit trying to be funny and acting all jolly… Major red flags!! ARREST HIM NOW!

JDV: Though the video is in between Palm Sunday services, he does it in the dark in the church office. He mentions a group of visitors including someone whose mom had apparently been in a youth group of his at Mississippi State University for eight years.

This was sort of odd, too. He was hiding in his office in the dark between services on Palm Sunday because he needed to get ready for the next service. He got himself ready for preaching by making a youtube video? There are just so many levels of dishonesty to this guy . . .

Btw, it would seem like a good idea to check with ‘the eleven’ from his church who ‘exposed’ him and got him fired to see what sort of issues they had with him. I wonder if they would be surprised by Leanne’s tragic experience?

Btw, it would seem like a good idea to check with ‘the eleven’ from his church who ‘exposed’ him and got him fired to see what sort of issues they had with him. I wonder if they would be surprised by Leanne’s tragic experience?

Yeah, I can see them watching a video like the following from the person being paid to be lead pastor, a video apparently broadcast from the church office in November 2012, and hearing what this guy says from 4:30 on (be forwarned of repeated coarse imagery, which in the context of being 10 years past the posted phone call makes the sexual innuendos even more disturbing):

If I heard this right, he would usher family members out of the room when people died — can’t imagine allowing that, but there it is, pick up and hold the dead body, and be in there for about 15 minutes.

JDV: Yeah, I can see them watching a video like the following from the person being paid to be lead pastor, a video apparently broadcast from the church office in November 2012, and hearing what this guy says from 4:30 on (be forwarned of repeated coarse imagery, which in the context of being 10 years past the posted phone call makes the sexual innuendos even more disturbing):

Okay, this was disturbing. With a benign face, still presenting himself as some sort of godly, kid-friendly minister, etc., this guy deliberately puts forth offensive sexual imagery that one would certainly not want a child watching, nor does it have any redeeming value. It is a thinly veiled attack upon someone who gave him thumbs down, always presented as from a loving, generous heart, while revealing the seething anger underneath. It reveals who and what he is, hiding his perversity behind a mask of decency.

If I heard this right, he would usher family members out of the room when people died — can’t imagine allowing that, but there it is, pick up and hold the dead body, and be in there for about 15 minutes.

I keep thinking “NECROSEXUAL?”
(Once thought, it cannot be un-thought…)

JDV: References to a Peter Pan/Neverland view of things, one minute in

Or “Neverland” as in Michael Jackson’s estate with hot and cold running little boys?

TS00: Okay, this was disturbing. With a benign face, still presenting himself as some sort of godly, kid-friendly minister, etc., this guy deliberately puts forth offensive sexual imagery that one would certainly not want a child watching, nor does it have any redeeming value.

This guy is not only Creepytown, but a cartoon of himself. It’s like he’s deliberately TRYING to be as slimy and creepy as possible, like he’s playing “Can You Top This?” with himself, seeing how much he can get away with. Cultivating the “look fair but FEEL FOUL” vibe like an official portrait of David Miscavage.

Like the pic up top; he looks like some sort of creepy CEELBRITY, wearing a pectoral cross bigger than the Pope’s like he’s trying to show everyone how Christian he is.

JDV: Yeah, I can see them watching a video like the following from the person being paid to be lead pastor, a video apparently broadcast from the church office in November 2012, and hearing what this guy says from 4:30 on (be forwarned of repeated coarse imagery, which in the context of being 10 years past the posted phone call makes the sexual innuendos even more disturbing):

He describes using disclaimed “graphic” language in the video in question — and saying he had saved a child’s life with the selfsame video (just take his word for it; wonder if it was the one who he said he grabbed behind the head by the hair and slammed his forehead to the desk),

And though he disclaims the use of “graphic language”, here’s yet another to go with the songs already linked to, again from a church office:

6:30 mark, they are spoken of as evil and wicked, and having broken the law. And he indicates he heard the latter from the FBI who indicated he had places he could go to sue them and own their homes. (He says the FBI told him this in his ear, so maybe not on apiece of paper, as their volunteering that a suit and owning the homes of the accused doesn’t sound like standard operating procedure.)

This video from January 1, 2013 (as always, quotes are attempts at transcription, but refer to the video for verification) appears to be a real snapshot of what the ‘eleven’ at his church and others would see as issues, especially in light of the 2002 phone call presented:

Talks — alone from the church office, he says moments from New Year’s Day – about:
From opening – Speaks about the new year not looking better except for youtubers making “the definitive difference” in his life that year, adding that “there may be a reason to continue to live because I have found this marvelous medium”.

0:43 mark — “My wife is in menopause”; later, “it’s living hell, folks.” At 3:30, talks about the business he’s in meaning to never point out anything stupid or off the normal path.

4:30 mentions a video that made him “feel like a worthy human being — and believe me, in my house, I don’t feel like one”; more on lack of respect at home
5:00 video in question is where he is picked by a youtuber as favorite commentator of 2012. Reaction: “I cried… for an hour. I had never appreciated an accolade such much in my life. That was the greatest thing, I think, that anyone had ever said about me. And he’s gonna send me two sugar t*ts – (voice affectation combined with vigorous squeezing motions with each hand over his chest) the stretch kind that you squeeze and [inaudible/unclear]. And I’m looking forward to them, man, can’t wait to sink my teeth into them.” Again, from the church office.

5:45 He speaks about a “new friend out there with whom I’ve been communicating recently, and she is a delight” who he hopes will turn out to be “something fantastic”. Talks about being a counselor and “certain flags that wave that normal folks are not alerted to.” From 5:45 on, note the language used in talking around the nature of communication, wanting to be able to say things that won’t be seen as a come-on. Says he wants them to be able to but can “say those things but we understand that they’re jokes.”

Again, note the tone, and the following from the church office at 7:45: “She is a delight, a delicious discovery. And I’m so hoping that she will become, really, a dear friend. And that we can laugh, that we can be suggestive, that we can be anything we want to be together… and realize that it is, you know, just that. That I don’t have to worry, you know, that I have someone who will show up on my doorstep one day and bring this marriage to a close — (Laughs and makes Groucho Marx cigar motion and voice affectation) — which might be really a good thing.”

Continuing: “Or that she might worry that one day I would misconstrue what she says and show up in her area as some kind of stalker. So I have got delicious invitations for 2013. Mostly, like I say, a new friend whom I adore, I love to hear from her, and she’s always been a mystery to me. And I told her so from the beginnings. ‘You — you… really… (trails off, raises eyebrows) You are something else.’”

Continuing: “She makes delightful comments. She makes wonderful messaging, um, things to me. And I just want – I guess, I guess that’s the strangest thing to me. It’s rare for me – and I know none of you will understand this, but it is rare for me to meet blindly someone that I hope will be the kind of pal, buddy, friend, that I really love to correspond with. That I don’t have to be afraid that she will misunderstand at some point the way I speak or talk.”

Continuing: “That she will not become afraid that I have become enamored with her, falling in love with her, have, you know, lost my mind because I’m an old guy. (Voice affectation) ‘I’m old! Gah, it don’t take much (shift to another type of whispered voice affectation, and initial unclear wording, leading back to an exclamation) Sugar t*ts! (vigorous voice affectation combined with grimace and vigorous squeezing motions with each hand over his chest) The kind you squeeze.’ (Switches back to initial tone) So, I mean, the thing is, as I start this new year, the one thing I want is that it would bring me new friends, the kind that I can talk to and enjoy. The kind that I will not scare, and the kind that will not scare me. Because in my business as a minister, Lord knows, I do not need anyone to come out and say ‘Well, he sent me these invitational messages, and he wants me to do this and that…’ (shakes head) That’s not who I am. And it’s rare – matter of fact, this is the first time ever in all of the experiences I’ve had on YouTube (whispering) which is my favorite thing in the whole world (back to initial voice), were it not for this, I would cease to exist. But, I want, more than anything, to establish ties. … [Reference to Little Prince] … We want to establish ties, not relationships, because we won’t ever get together. Any of us.”

13 minute mark — more on menopause, also about fighting and yelling, being banned from the house

And that’s my RL spook story. No dark studio rooms, no Gothy décor, nothing scary or spooky, just something weird happening, leaving no evidence behind, not repeated in my presence. So what do you do?

Sounds as if an exorcism is in order!

Funny you should mention that.
THAT was another High Weirdness experience, from around 40 years ago:

MY FULLERTON FREAKOUT (long)

This happened around 1980; I’d been out of college for two years and was working, but driving 30 miles to Cal State Fullerton on Saturday nights for my regular FRP gaming all-nighters. (I think at the time it was mostly RuneQuest instead of D&D, maybe other Chaosium games with occasional “I’ll try anything once” of new releases by my regular GM Wayne.) Cal State Fullerton, third floor Langsdorf Hall, just off the elevators.

(Cal State Fullerton had its own oral history of the weird; there had been a lone-gunman mass shooting in the Library some years previously, the open balconies on the front of the 8-story Humanities Building attracted suicide jumpers, there was a poltergeist story connected to a convenience store the other side of the 57 Freeway, and Wayne told me there was a leftover orange grove on-campus he avoided because it looked REAL spooky at night.)

Usual bunch of gamers that night (fandoms such as this attract some really odd types); I remember sitting in the corridor with a few other gamers going on about something from a real character I’d known at Cal Poly. The game session must have ended early (i.e. around midnight) because a lot of us decamped to Wayne’s place (a student apartment complex just north of the campus) for an after-meeting “recreational thinking skull session”. Wayne would have been “holding court” in bare feet with a big mug of Dr Pepper (Mountain Dew didn’t become the drink of gamers until years later) and we would have been yakking about just any subject.

THAT’s when things got Weird. At some point during the night I got the sensation that something was sizing me up. A “Behinder Effect” where I KNEW there was something watching me, but whichever way I turned it would always jump behind me so I could never see what it was. The feeling kept growing, until by the time we were at Wayne’s it was very intense.

I don’t remember the details, but I DID get some sort of direction on it — a few degrees east of north. (Later I traced the direction on a map, and found a line in that direction would pass through Brea Canyon (reputation for anomalous car trouble), Cal Poly Pomona (where I went to school), and ending somewhere around Death Valley.)

I remember making some sort of quick silent prayer (don’t remember exactly what), then It immediately hit me, from out of nowhere like flipping a light switch on. A sudden all-consuming wall of pee-your-pants FEAR. Utter TERROR. The only way to describe it is I got hit with a Fear Spell and fumbled my saving throw. And it just kept up at full intensity.

I think Wayne and the others tried to talk me down from my obvious near-breakdown. I vaguely remember him saying “You don’t know half the Weird Sh*t that goes on around here,” but don’t remember if it was then or afterwards. Around 2-3 Ayem I managed to drive home, but I sure didn’t get any sleep that night.

The next morning the Fear Spell had faded to where I could think in complete sentences again, and I got on the phone to two guys from the Cal Poly Gang: Jim (my old dorm roomie), and Bob (both Christian, both fannishly weird) and told them what had happened. They both came over that night and we had some sort of prayer meeting around my kitchen table. Don’t remember the details (never been much of a praying man, so I know they did most of the talking), but I DO remember a sensation like sitting above a floor heater with warm air billowing around me. Might have gone out for eats after we ended the session; not sure, but that would have been normal with these guys.

A week or two later, I was back at Cal State for game night, keeping my eyes and ears open. From various sources over the next few weeks:

* Larry (another gamer with a rep for being interested in paranormal things) was either in the hospital (with a sudden life-threatening staph infection) or had just been discharged (it responded to treatment — “next thing I know I’m in a quarantine ward with antibiotic IVs in each arm”).
* This may have been when Wayne told me “You don’t know half the…” quote from above.
* General talk (don’t remember the sources) how the Weirdness that had been going on had stopped abruptly that Sunday after my freakout (the day Jim & Bob had that little get-together around my kitchen table).
* One of Wayne’s roomies (the non-stoner) much later related at some point that he’d had some weird experiences around that time. Once he claimed he woke up to find some sort of apparition dressed like a 17th Century Cavalier in his room who spoke to him; he thought this was most probably a waking dream. And once he said he saw Wayne in the living room looking at something on the ceiling like a spot of anomalous mist moving around; he was sure this wasn’t a dream.

So that was it. Nothing like this happened before, nothing since, naturally no physical evidence (unless you want to link Larry’s hospitalization, and the only apparent link was the timing). No Pagan Temple Screamers, no Operaton Ice Castle, none of the usual Spiritual Warrior shticks. Just something that happened, got attacked, called in some Big Guns for a response, things shut down, nothing since.

Some 15 years later in 1994 I adapted the experience into an FRP game scenario for TriTac’s Stalking the Night Fantastic (contemporary-supernatural milieu where the player-characters are “Government-Sanctioned Ghostbusters”). Never saw print because the scenario pack project fell through.

And 40 years later two things that still struck me:
* The immediate ATTACK when I did that prayer in Wayne’s living room that night. Instantaneous fangs-out response from Whatever It Was. And that it only was able to mess with my head and emotions, nothing physical. Suggestion (and Emotional Trigger) instead of Fireball.
* And if Whatever It Was hadn’t reacted in that way (a sudden blind rage), it could have continued on; I would have just been a little creeped out by the Behinder Effect, but not enough to do anything like I did.

There’s no amount of forgiveness that I would give to this pervert! Nor would my sister! How dare he betray our family who offered him a place to stay & helped him go to school! He is utterly disgusting!

I’m starting to understand. The pedophile manipulates through scripture twisting. Then when the other pastors/deacons in a church advise the victim to forgive the pedophile, it actually revictimizes the child/victim. My step-father/pedophile used some verbal manipulation, but this guy is evil. His I felt so bad that I went to seminary line would buffalo the naive/willfully ignorant congregation.

Folks read this comment by JDV. JDV does their research and I appreciate it. This is deeply disturbing.

JDV:
This video from January 1, 2013 (as always, quotes are attempts at transcription, but refer to the video for verification) appears to be a real snapshot of what the ‘eleven’ at his church and others would see as issues, especially in light of the 2002 phone call presented:

Talks — alone from the church office, he says moments from New Year’s Day – about:
From opening – Speaks about the new year not looking better except for youtubers making “the definitive difference” in his life that year, adding that “there may be a reason to continue to live because I have found this marvelous medium”.

0:43 mark — “My wife is in menopause”; later, “it’s living hell, folks.” At 3:30, talks about the business he’s in meaning to never point out anything stupid or off the normal path.

4:30 mentions a video that made him “feel like a worthy human being — and believe me, in my house, I don’t feel like one”; more on lack of respect at home
5:00 video in question is where he is picked by a youtuber as favorite commentator of 2012. Reaction: “I cried… for an hour. I had never appreciated an accolade such much in my life. That was the greatest thing, I think, that anyone had ever said about me. And he’s gonna send me two sugar t*ts – (voice affectation combined with vigorous squeezing motions with each hand over his chest) the stretch kind that you squeeze and [inaudible/unclear]. And I’m looking forward to them, man, can’t wait to sink my teeth into them.” Again, from the church office.

5:45 He speaks about a “new friend out there with whom I’ve been communicating recently, and she is a delight” who he hopes will turn out to be “something fantastic”. Talks about being a counselor and “certain flags that wave that normal folks are not alerted to.” From 5:45 on, note the language used in talking around the nature of communication, wanting to be able to say things that won’t be seen as a come-on. Says he wants them to be able to but can “say those things but we understand that they’re jokes.”

Again, note the tone, and the following from the church office at 7:45: “She is a delight, a delicious discovery. And I’m so hoping that she will become, really, a dear friend. And that we can laugh, that we can be suggestive, that we can be anything we want to be together… and realize that it is, you know, just that. That I don’t have to worry, you know, that I have someone who will show up on my doorstep one day and bring this marriage to a close — (Laughs and makes Groucho Marx cigar motion and voice affectation) — which might be really a good thing.”

Continuing: “Or that she might worry that one day I would misconstrue what she says and show up in her area as some kind of stalker. So I have got delicious invitations for 2013. Mostly, like I say, a new friend whom I adore, I love to hear from her, and she’s always been a mystery to me. And I told her so from the beginnings. ‘You — you… really… (trails off, raises eyebrows) You are something else.’”

Continuing: “She makes delightful comments. She makes wonderful messaging, um, things to me. And I just want – I guess, I guess that’s the strangest thing to me. It’s rare for me – and I know none of you will understand this, but it is rare for me to meet blindly someone that I hope will be the kind of pal, buddy, friend, that I really love to correspond with. That I don’t have to be afraid that she will misunderstand at some point the way I speak or talk.”

Continuing: “That she will not become afraid that I have become enamored with her, falling in love with her, have, you know, lost my mind because I’m an old guy. (Voice affectation) ‘I’m old! Gah, it don’t take much (shift to another type of whispered voice affectation, and initial unclear wording, leading back to an exclamation) Sugar t*ts! (vigorous voice affectation combined with grimace and vigorous squeezing motions with each hand over his chest) The kind you squeeze.’ (Switches back to initial tone) So, I mean, the thing is, as I start this new year, the one thing I want is that it would bring me new friends, the kind that I can talk to and enjoy. The kind that I will not scare, and the kind that will not scare me. Because in my business as a minister, Lord knows, I do not need anyone to come out and say ‘Well, he sent me these invitational messages, and he wants me to do this and that…’ (shakes head) That’s not who I am. And it’s rare – matter of fact, this is the first time ever in all of the experiences I’ve had on YouTube (whispering) which is my favorite thing in the whole world (back to initial voice), were it not for this, I would cease to exist. But, I want, more than anything, to establish ties. … [Reference to Little Prince] … We want to establish ties, not relationships, because we won’t ever get together. Any of us.”

13 minute mark — more on menopause, also about fighting and yelling, being banned from the house

Hi, Dee I forwarded this post to the Porters’s Chapel where Dural Ragsdale was a pastor.the West Jackson district office of the United Methodist church contacted me. A man by the name of Steven Cook wanted to know if I knew how they could contact LeeAnn Kay. He says the church that I sent the email to sent it to him and wanted to followup on this. They are claiming no prior knowledge of this incident. He said they wanted to “reach out to her….” He sounded genuinely concerned. I told him about your blog sight. I hope I haven’t overstepped my bounds but felt the church should know about this thanks for all you do, Ruth

Ruth McPherson:
Hi, Dee I forwarded this post to the Porters’s Chapel where Dural Ragsdale was a pastor.the West Jackson district office of the United Methodist church contacted me. A man by the name of Steven Cook wanted to know if I knew how they could contact LeeAnn Kay. He says the church that I sent the email to sent it to him and wanted to followup on this. They are claiming no prior knowledge of this incident. He said they wanted to “reach out to her….” He sounded genuinely concerned. I told him about your blog sight. I hope I haven’t overstepped my bounds but felt the church should know about this thanks for all you do, Ruth

So glad you contacted me. I left a message at Proctor’s but no one returned my call. I would be happy to put him in touch with leanne after I speak with him. Tell him to use my contact phone number 919-792-8632

Thank you for your comment. I’m so sorry that your family has to confront this.I want you all to know that I utterly believe Leanne. I’ve been doing this for a long time and her account was detailed, something I see when victims want to get at the truth. Even more startling is her phone call. This is the first time I’ve even heard anything like this. She is a strong woman.