My partner keeps coming too fast. What can I do?

Q: I think my partner is suffering from premature ejaculation. I really care about him, but this is taking a toll on both of us. What do I do?

A: Many of us have dealt with this, myself included. No worries, I won’t say any names. However, I will say that you will definitely need to have patience to make it better. Just to be clear premature ejaculation is uncontrolled ejaculation either before or shortly after sexual penetration. It usually happens with minimal sexual stimulation and before the person wishes.

So now that that's out of the way, here are a few tips that might help:

Switch sex positions frequently or try the stop and start technique. Stop for 30 seconds, then start again when he feels he’s in control again. It may be annoying, but give him permission to pause if he feels he’s close to the edge.

Use condoms. Condoms can decrease sensitivity, which can help delay ejaculation. There are also condoms with numbing agents or that are made of thicker latex to help. Think Trojan Extended or Durex Performax Intense.

Don’t use those over the counter drugs you see at the corner store. They don’t work. If you feel like it's a physical issue, seek out a doctor to prescribe you something.

If none of that works it may be worth looking into a therapist. There could be some psychological issues that are preventing a longer session. Offer to go with him if that will help.