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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Do you ever feel like you are just go, go, going from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed? I have sort of felt that way this week but it isn't totally the truth, it's just been my perception. In reality, I've had some good times with my family (with Adam being off this week), got a lot of stuff accomplished and are sort of ahead of the game with regards to getting Braly's 10th birthday party ready as well as helping with the Taco Benefit that takes place this Friday from 4-7 or 8ish.

I have helped put baskets together for the benefit, I have now baked 6 cakes to make a 3 tier cake for Braly's party. I have a feeling we're going to be eating cake for awhile. lol But oh well. He is one very special boy (I don't know if I'm allowed to say little anymore since he'll be double digits). And I am honestly really excited for the things that we've planned for his party. I am hoping to share pics after the event but may need to take some down time after to relax a bit. I have a few more things to prep for his party tonight & tomorrow and I am hoping to have everything but the last few things done so Friday can be spent setting up at the church for the benefit as well as spending some extra time with family that has come to visit.

In case you didn't realize it, I see the Oncologist once a month. I could use some extra prayers for the pain in my back & hip. They feel sort of stiff and it hurts to bend down & then stand up. The thing I'm trying to figure out is whether to take any pain meds for it because it isn't like it hurts all the time but when I am in a position for any length of time, I have a hard time when I first move. Kinda like being old. Lol. Part of it is from being out of shape from not being able to do any exercising after the hysterectomy, some may be from the damage the cancer did to the bones, some is probably from the car injury I had when I was just 16, and some is probably due to aging. No matter what contributes to it, I am praising God that I am able to do all the things I get to do & I am praising him for removing ALL the pain. Just trusting HIM for it all!

I am sad that in this week, I've fallen a bit behind on my Bible Reading. And today I am feeling it. When I do my daily readings & spend some quiet time with God, I feel so much better & focused. I can say that it is more difficult for me to share from God's word when I have not spent my time with Him. However, I just taught a lesson in kids' church that was about Self-Confidence and we were learning about how each of us are special because God created us in His image. We are working on a great verse that EVERYONE should memorize and say as a reminder of just how special we are.

Psalm 139:14 I Praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful I know that full well.
It seems to always come down to Praising God for all he's done! And here is a great, upbeat song that reminds us to give it all back to God!

P.S. Don't forget to sign up for the FREE email updates. It's a great way to not miss out when I actually write new posts. On the Right side of the page. You type your email & I think that it sends you a confirmation email that you have to open & click the link. If you are like me, you will have to do it RIGHT NOW or you'll forget. :)

Saturday, July 19, 2014

Yesterday morning I was working on some things for Braly's 10th birthday party. We don't invite our kids' friends over every year to celebrate with us but there are certain years that I think should be celebrated with a bigger party & turning double digits is one of them.

So I was in the basement sewing a project for the party and started singing Agnus Dei by Michael W. Smith.

AlleluiaAlleluiaFor the Lord God Almighty reigns

AlleluiaAlleluiaFor the Lord God Almighty reigns

AlleluiaHolyHoly are You Lord God AlmightyWorthy is the LambWorthy is the Lamb

You are holyHoly are you Lord God AlmightyWorthy is the LambWorthy is the Lamb

Amen

The problem was, as I was singing, my voice started to crack because I was choking back some tears. I kept singing because I wanted to show God my praise despite this stupid disease. I blurted out a prayer & said something like "Lord, I trust you, and I trust your timing. It is difficult to wait sometimes but I know that you know what's best for me & my family & I am trusting you to please give us some good news next week." (I saw the Oncologist on Tuesday & he said that the estrogen number was less than 10 which is where we wanted it to be & where he expected it to be months ago by using the shots. He said that if the tumor marker came down again & since the size of the tumor decreased that he would be referring me to the breast specialist for a consultation to find out about surgery)

Just as I finished praying & asking God for some good news next week, the phone rang and the caller ID showed GB Oncology. I pressed the talk button and immediately heard my doctor's voice. For a split second I was a little nervous at what he was about to tell me because I don't recall him calling me with good news, usually he delivers any bad news himself & lets the nurses call for the good news. I reminded myself of the things God has showed & told me & quickly said in my head "I trust you God!" My doctor continued to tell me that last month the tumor marker number was 148 and this month it is down to 98. I said, "that's great!" and I'm not sure if I said it aloud but I at least thought PRAISE GOD!!!!

I am now scheduled to the see the breast surgeon on July 31st in Green Bay. This is a huge thing for me to share with all of you but I am praying, asking, believing, & expecting that when the doctor examines me, that there won't be anything to even remove. That's right, I'm asking LARGLY. I believe that I will be completely healed of cancer one day, I'm not sure if it will be completely supernatural or if it will be aided with more medical procedures but the other day when I was praying, I told God that I know he told me that he removed the root of the problem & that he'd take care of the rest but I wasn't sure what that meant exactly and I didn't know his timing.

I dreamed last week (and I hadn't been dreaming a lot lately), of piles & piles (I'm talking about an obnoxious amount) of beautiful, glistening, crystal white snow. You know the kind where the light hits it & it just shimmers as the light reflects off of it. It can be so breathtaking. When I woke up that morning, I thought, whoa, what was with ALL that SNOW? I'm soooooo not ready for that yet (After the winter we had, I think some people started to say it was a swear to say snow. Lol. Well, I forgot that I had dreamed of that until I was praying and I felt that God told me that he'd cleanse me as white as snow. That's when I remembered my dream.

Psalm 51:7 NIV Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

The neat thing about this verse is that after this dream a day had passed, after my prayer time & this revelation another day had passed and then my reading plan had me read Psalm 51. That's what you call a "God thing." And I LOVE it when God shares with me like that! So I am holding onto these different things that the Holy Spirit has revealed to me in my quiet time and I am trusting God. Some days it is harder because I feel stiff or have more low back & hip pain. But God's name will be glorified & I remind myself that God has given me strength, healing, he's made me whole, & he keeps right on taking care of me so I just need to hang in there.