Zombies

3. The zombie invasion will finally be launched from the Midwest and will explain why dead people have been voting in Chicago for so long (sleeper cells).

I still have a few months remaining for this to come true (but who says it hasn’t come true already?). There is good news about zombie attacks though. Canadian researchers have come up with a mathematical model suggesting it is possible to repel a zombie attack. They say the key is “hit hard and hit often.”

Now I know Canadians have the most experience with zombies. Canada is infested with them. But really, did we need Canadian researchers to tell us this?