2. Haploid

I believe an old joke on talk.origins referred to the 'H' in Jesus H. Christ as 'Haploid'.

I don't know. This is a bit like trying to disprove Santa's sleigh using physics to me. We have two mostly non-overlapping camps here who won't be convinced by arguments made in the sphere of the other side's reality.

In other words, if you're trying to use science and reason to disprove people's religious notions, your chance of success is nearly exactly the same as a religious believer's chance of success in convincing a non-believer through appeal to faith.

3. In wakadoodle world anything can happen.

Virgin Birth is a myth-meme that occurs frequently in various religions. As the gods can do anything, a virgin birth can produce a male child from a female egg. Your mistake is viewing nonsense through a rational lens. Santa can't fit down a chimney either. The cow could not possibly jump over the moon.

12. Also, Mary was also only 12 or 13 years old.

Mary was born free of sin due to her mothers immaculate conception of Mary. Mary's mother was barren when she gave birth to Mary. But, Mary was only 12 or 13 years old when she was impregnated. Yahweh was abit of a ped as we all know.

8. In real life, what you say makes sense.

But.....if "God" created everything, including humans and DNA, it would be a piece of cake for him to "create" a properly fertilized egg. You just don't get it. This is how it goes: God is a male figure. God impregnated Mary. The fertilized egg is "perfect". End of discussion.

13. Mary had it made!

Sure, she had to watch he son get crucified, but not only did she get to avoid icky sex with a hairy man, she didn't even have to die! She just shot up into heaven...whooosh!
(and I always thought "Our Lady of the Assumption" just meant she said to Joseph, "Well, I assume it's god's....")

In the Mahabharata, Kunti gives birth to 3 sons! No, 4 sons! and her virginity remains intact! But alas, she burns to death in a forest fire. Mary didn't even have to go thru something like that.

16. Did Adam & Eve have belly buttons?

Of course they did, but they only were able harvest lint from them after they became aware that they were ashamed from being naked...

...or something like that.

First was Adam, then came Eve. They produced Cain the Able. Then Cain slew Able. That would make the world population to be a total of three, right? Then Cain got married. Where the fuck did his wife come from?????????????

17. Two problems with your post...

The first is that the stories in the scriptures may have been misinterpreted and mistranslated for quite awhile. The evidence for Mary even being considered a virgin as we think of a virgin at the time these were written is pretty weak. Other than it only being mentioned in two of the gospels, virginity was a more inclusive trait at the time. Someone who was a virgin had as much to do with their perceived ability to concieve as it did with the actual not having had sex. A girl who was thought to have not reached a stage where she could conceive of child was considered a virgin regardless of if she had had sex or been raped. Also, a woman who was thought to be to old to conceive could be considered a "virgin" too. I read a great book on the history of Christianity that had mentioned misinterpretations of Mary's virginity and lack of real evidence in scripture supporting the story, but unfortunately I accidentally ruined the book and have yet to buy another copy :-P Here's the first decent link I found though:

The second thing wrong with your post is that the God most Christians believe in is all powerful and not confined to our laws of physics or understanding of reality. In other words, such a being could have made Jesus look like Bugs Bunny, simply be controlling our every thought and emotion for fun, or have willed our entire universe into being a few minutes ago creating false memories and histories for everyone alive. In fact, no crazy religious idea regardless of if its written in a book or made up on the spot would be more implausible than any other since a being is involved that can do whatever the fuck it wants. Look up "Flying Spaghetti Monster"