Want to Truly Live Life on Your Own Terms? Go Full Shitlord

Are you just living to be liked? Most people are deeply insecure. How can I be “cool?” Will saying this lead her to not liking me? Am I going to lose her? Am I going to embarrass myself? If I’m honest about myself and my beliefs, will I lose my friends? These are questions everyone has asked.

Human beings are generally followers, as I detail so extensively in chapter 5 of Stumped. We do things we don’t want to do, cultivate a personality that we don’t want to have, tell little lies and hide our true selves, because we’re afraid we won’t obtain the approval of others. This was obviously beneficial to our survival as a social species, and the social aspect of our nature means that everyone will always find themselves forced to conform in some way for reasons of survival. It’s not a good idea to rock the boat at your workplace with your opinions of your boss or, in more recent times, politically incorrect truths that could get you fired and have you lose your livelihood. Going full shitlord doesn’t mean being stupid.

But what about in your social circle? What about in your persona elsewhere, including in your personal brand that you should be building up in your online businesses?

These things are all something that you can freely choose how you behave in regards to. You may be a slave to money elsewhere, but in those areas, you are a slave to nothing but the demons in your own mind.

Last night, I went to the Gorilla Mindset seminar in New York City. Though I’d been commenting on Danger & Play for a while, and know people who had met him before, it was the first time that I’ve actually met Mike Cernovich in person.

A lot of people in my position might have been nervous about meeting such a well-known authority in a subculture that they identify with and respect. They’ll try to do everything they can to get those authority figures to like them. Conversely, this is likely to achieve the opposite effect, something Mike made clear in the seminar. Hiding nothing, I met Mike, told him I enjoyed his work and what it’s been doing, had him sign my copy of Gorilla Mindset, gave him a complimentary copy of Stumped, which I said he could do whatever he wanted with, and then went out with him and many others, having good conversations and meeting many other new people.

Notice how I expected nothing with any of this. When you’re being your authentic self, you don’t have to, and that’s the point. That’s what I would argue “shitlording” is in its essence. However, in our world of trigger warnings and safe spaces, just being your authentic self can cause offense to a special snowflake, who will in turn, label you a shitlord. Take it as a compliment, as always.

The best part about this subculture, as seen in Roosh’s meet last year and Mike’s this time around, is that you’re free to go full shitlord. Since we’re already heretics, you don’t need to worry about being “offensive” or losing some kind of fluid definition of social status because you said the “wrong thing.” Since everyone shares the same mindset, it forges a social bond far deeper than simply graduating from the same school or working at the same place. Those are all artificial connections. These are natural connections of the mind. And yet, as Mike remarked, meets like this are supposedly “weird” because they were coordinated on the internet.

The internet has given rise to many social negatives, but its saving grace is that it allows the coordination of groups like this, making it easier for you to go full shitlord. It makes it easier to go full shitlord because, if you’re looking carefully, it allows you to make true friends that you wouldn’t make before.

Going full shitlord allows you to easily discern a true friend from a false one, in the words of Quintus Curtius. Put simply, if you have a “friend” that would turn his or her back on you for something you’re doing, something you said, something you believe in, etc., he is not a real friend. If someone can’t accept your real self, that someone doesn’t care about you and never did.

Guess what this means? You’re free!

No need to virtue signal. No need to do other stupid things to increase your social status with people that hate you, no need to be a slave to the feelings and desires of others. You are always proactive, not reactive.

(This doesn’t mean to be selfish, as a true friend also needs to give what he gets.)

When talking with Mike or anyone else last night, I didn’t need to worry about “saying the wrong thing” or whether they’d “like me” or not. This gave me – and everyone else there – complete freedom to meet anyone and everyone, say exactly what I thought, and have a grand old time.

The idea is to have that kind of freedom as much as you can, and that is a choice that going full shitlord allows you to make.

Maybe this subculture isn’t for you, and that’s fine, but there are others that will be for you, and by you going full shitlord, you will more easily find the people who share your mindset.

Going full shitlord lets the people that naturally like you (and that you will like in turn) gravitate to you. It also guarantees that you won’t waste time virtue signaling and poisoning your mind with a negative mindset. As Mike remarks, mindset is contagious. Due to the mechanics of crowd psychology (covered at length, once again, in the 5th chapter of Stumped), you will want to be around people whose energy that you can feed off of, that you like, and that you know will like you. It will make you braver. You will feel better.

Perhaps more importantly, you’ll cut off the negatives and the takers from your life. Doubt will leave you behind. You won’t waste energy on people who truly want nothing to do with you.

For instance, after Mike left, I spotted a group of three girls who looked like they wanted something (tip: if you’re in a crowded bar or club environment, and you see girls basically standing stiff and talking to each other, they’re looking to be approached). One of my friends who I met last year at a regular meet came out that night as well. He’s a better opener than I am, so I let him do his thing. It was all high energy screening game from there.

Things were going well. While I originally desired the blonde in the group, these situations are chaotic and often it’s hard to know who will ultimately be paired with who. The way it worked out this time was that he got the blonde’s attention, and I got that of her raven-haired friend. No complaints. I actually held court with two of the girls (there’s always the outlier that neither of you want) while he worked the blonde alone.

Then I decided to experiment. Since Gmac was nearby wearing his glorious MAGA hat that got a lot of attention, we got into the topic, and then I pulled out my phone, showing the picture I took with the shitlord of all shitlords himself, Donald J. Trump, in November of last year.

I wanted to see what reaction I’d get. Would it be shock? Hate? Love? A strange fascination?

It was actually more subtle. I just steadily lost momentum after that. She obviously didn’t like it, but not in a very visible, emotional way. The connection was just lost.

After the interaction ended, my friend mentioned that since my girl was a Latina from Miami, pulling out the Trump picture probably wasn’t a good idea. I suppose that’s true – if you’re only looking for a transactional kind of interaction. Earlier, Mike went over how charisma begins not by looking to get something out of other people, but by connecting with them deeply (something I cite and echo in Stumped’s 4th chapter). So my thought about it was…

Great!

By going full shitlord, by being unafraid of demonstrating an aspect of myself, I successfully screened out someone who wasn’t going to be a real constructive part of my life. Could I have had sex with her at some point? Maybe, but going full shitlord, I believe, goes hand in hand with an abundance mentality, which will conversely make it more likely you’ll find people you truly can get the most out of for your life.

One potential sexual encounter just doesn’t mean that much to me anymore.

In a culture that wants to shut down free speech and constrain your very thoughts, going full shitlord is at once an act of rebellion and a way to take your life where you want it to go, to find people who will truly add to it rather than subtract from it.

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