i have a 5 year old daughter that came home from school with bruses on her neck .

what can i do and what actions can i take? she does not know the child who did this to her all she knows is that they are not in her class and they are bigger then she is. she is only in kindergarden and i talked to the school and her teacher and all they tell me is they will watch her better. I am not happy with that because what if that child does it again and it kills my daughter i want action now .

What the Expert Says:

We are so sorry this has occurred at your school. We hope that your daughter will not have this happen to her again. Please teach her skills so that she can know what to do if she ever feels threatened again. Even the very best schools have bullying incidents because it is so hard to monitor all of the students all of the time, especially at times like recess. Also encourage your daughter to stay in the parts of the playground with the teacher. The closer she stays to the teacher, the more likely that she will remain safe. We understand your frustration, but we are also not sure what additional action the school would be able to take without additional information. What may be helpful is asking other parents at the school if they have had similar experiences so that you can get to the bottom of the situation. What you can also do is make sure that the school has policies and procedures for bullying incidents that they follow through on. You could also bring in an awareness group or campaign to educate the students about what bullying is and how to keep themselves and their friends safe. The students in a school have a lot of power among themselves to keep each other safe. It may be good to also see if your daughter's friends have any information about what happened. It is likely that more than one person saw this. You could even ask your daughter if anybody else saw.

Bullying is a very serious and difficult problem to cope with and we hope you work with your school. If you find you cannot work with your school or if the problem continues without being addressed, than it may be worth considering a transfer. Since these situations are so emotional it can be really easy to fall into a blame game with the school. Try not to do this. Your child is the one who will suffer because of it. If you have a rocky relaitonship with the school and the staff there and then your child has to be there for most of the day, it puts them right in the middle of it all. Try to focus on teamwork and problem solving. If the school isn't onboard, then move schools and perhaps take it up with higher administration.

Counselor, Dominic
Boys Town National Hotline-A hotline for parents and teens
1-800-448-3000
www.parenting.org