Author: Bell Kariuki

Why Do We Believe Anything, Anyway?
Bell Kariuki on Perception, & illusions of the world.

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​WHAT DO WE MEAN BY THE WORD “BELIEVER?”

Wikipedia defines the general concept of belief this way:Belief is the state of mind in which a person thinks something to be the case, with or without there being empirical evidence to prove that something is the case with factual certainty.“REALITY” VS “THE WORLD”

Everything we know about reality enters our brains via one or more of our five senses.

An individual person, living in a specific physical location on the earth, will never in the course of a lifetime encounter 99% or more of all the information and/or experience that is available on just this one tiny planet. We won’t read all the books. We won’t visit all the places. We won’t meet all the people. Most of the animal species on earth we won’t even see a picture of in our lifetimes, let alone witness in person (there are some 950,000 species of insects, alone). The “world” each of us labels “reality” is in fact a construct in our brain, built from the miniscule slivers of data we take in through our senses, living in at most a few places, attending a few, or even just one school system, knowing at most a handful of people, and having even that tiny stream of experience narrowed down to the few scraps our brains don’t withhold from consciousness for our own good.
That may sound bleak, but if it were otherwise, we would almost certainly succumb to overwhelm and be unable to function.

So, why then does the unique “world” in each of our brains feel like the “whole world” to us? We can accept rationally, based on what we know about brain function as described in the previous paragraph, that our understanding of reality can’t possibly be an accurate/complete representation of the world we live in.
Yet it feels completely real. Why?

THE NECESSITY OF BELIEF

Why do we believe anything beyond the concrete, present-moment data being continually gathered by our senses? And not just God or religious/spiritual type beliefs, but anything at all? Why do I believe my wife loves me? Why do I believe my children will succeed in life? Why do I believe that I am a good person, and so are my friends? Why do I believe there are even such categories as good or evil in the world?

The explanation is that navigating the limited piece of physical reality we encounter in life, and remaining mentally and emotionally secure enough to survive, find mates, and propagate the species, requires an unquestioning, and when you think about it, strikingly unreasonable confidence in ourselves and in the world. Since full awareness of reality as-it-is was not an option for our ancient ancestors (as the overwhelm caused by so much data would have diminished, rather than enhanced, their chances of survival), evolution equipped them –and, as their descendants, us too — with brains capable of generating a convincing illusion of the reality of our own small words.

Think about an optical illusion. What we see in the picture is not simply what’s there. Our brains connect dots and fill in gaps until the bits and pieces in the image coalesce into something we recognize. We are seeing what’s there, but our brains are adding “unreal” elements that allow us to make sense of what we’re seeing, or that allow us to understand incoming data in relation to purely mental pieces of our experience, like memory.

Our brains are not malfunctioning when they do this. They are operating as designed. Beliefs are the projected “lines” (storylines might be an even better analogy) our brains have evolved to draw between “dots” of otherwise unrelated hard data, in order to tease out a solid and relatable, if to a disturbing degree illusory, world for us to succeed in.

Our brains are simply Belief Generating Machines.
Without beliefs, we would have no context in which to understand ourselves and our lives. We would be lost and ineffective. Our brains generate beliefs because beliefs are necessary for biological survival.

EQUIVALENT BELIEF SYSTEMS — RELIGION, PHILOSOPHY, SCIENCE

From this perspective, the brains of not only Christians, Muslims and Hindus, but also Stoics, Existentialists, Transcendentalists (all philosophies), and even atheists who accept the reality-explaining power of science, are doing exactly the same thing. They are connecting the scant number of “dots” in their individual sensory experience with projected “belief lines” to create a picture of the world they can move about in confidently.
It’s important to stress here that the fact that our brains generate new, or accept established, beliefs to make sense of reality does not automatically mean that the content of those beliefs is false . I think that’s an easy conclusion to jump to, and I want to avoid easy conclusions.
WHAT DO WE BELIEVE?

Let’s do a little experiment together. Pick up some droppable object near you. Keys, a pillow, a small child, whatever. (For the literalists, I should add that I am just kidding about the child, and that you really shouldn’t ever drop children.)
Ok, now look at it and really try to believe that when you drop it, that it is going to float into the sky. I am going to do this with you. I just picked up a stuffed rabbit that happened to be on the couch. Now using your free will, REALLY try to BELIEVE that when you drop your object, gravity is not going to exist anymore. If you are anything like me, you will find that this is not possible. While I was staring at the rabbit, I actually was able to create this superficial feeling of suspense and tried to really expect it to not drop. But if you stopped me and asked me in the middle of that if I would bet my life on the results, I am going to go ahead and admit that I would have bet on gravity.
I dropped it. And guess what?! It didn’t drop! It floated in mid-air! Isn’t that amazing?

Do you believe me?

No?

Why not?

Because by the time you can use your conscious mind to “believe” something, your unconscious mind has already sorted through the data and there is no way you can force yourself to un-know what you know. You might be able to convince yourself that it is possible for gravity to stop for a moment. It’s like when I was in high school and I kept almost breaking my glasses to prove that I really believed God would heal my eyes.

But when the rubber meets the road, you really can’t choose to believe or not believe in something like gravity. Every moment of your existence has been influenced and limited by it. You’ve never escaped it, and unless you leave this planet on some space adventure some day, you never will.

I grew up in an environment that placed a high priority on belief. Belief was everything. Belief was made “us” vs “them”. Belief was what determined not just your life, but your afterlife. But what is belief really?

Do I believe in gravity or do I know that it exists? After all, isn’t it theoretically possible that gravity as we currently understand it doesn’t exist? I mean, our views of what holds us to the ground has changed pretty radically through history. Who is to know that we won’t discover that our current understanding of gravity is wrong? Even the most straight forward assumptions are still assumptions. There’s always another possibility. For example, isn’t it theoretically possible (even if unlikely) that we are part of a computer simulation that holds us to the ground simply because that’s what the programmer wanted the program to do?

So on that level, pretty much EVERYTHING is a belief because EVERYTHING we know is built on assumptions. We “know” that gravity is real, but that assumes that your perception of existence is real and not a dream or some sort of momentary simulation in the mind of God. Everything you believe or know is built on a lot of assumptions that have already been processed by your unconscious mind and that is the foundation upon which we can start forming words and ideas about what we “believe.”

So what happens when your unconscious mind removes some of the assumptions?
What happens when some of what you built the words and concepts on does not exist anymore?

For instance, let’s talk about God.

When I was a kid, I would pray up to the sky all the time. During worship services, I would look up because I was somehow taught that God was this Supreme Being “up” in Heaven, and someday he would come “down” here to rescue us. But then in school, of course, we learned about space and the earth and how it rotates and how there is really no such thing as “up” or “down.” These are ideas relative to earth and our position within its gravitational pull. And in fact, what is up to me right now is down for a lot of other people on earth, and in a few hours, up has drastically changed for all of us. So if up and down aren’t real, then what do we mean by God being “up” in Heaven? And why do so many worship leaders stare at the lights of the sanctuary and reach their hands into the sky as though trying to reach somebody “up” there? Up where? Towards which planet? Which galaxy? Because if it’s in some direction that we are supposed to think about God, that direction would be constantly changing. Sometimes the congregation should be gazing down and to the right or reaching their hands straight out behind them…

So what do you do when you lose the up and down assumption in your unconscious? Well, you either stop looking up, or you look up in a more metaphorical way. But once you lose that assumption, it’s impossible to once again BELIEVE that God is UP there. You can’t do it. You have seen that up is not real, and you will never be able to un-see that.

So here’s my point in all of this: we should be very slow to judge people for their beliefs.
I’m talking to myself as well here. There are some beliefs that drive me crazy. I find them backwards and limiting and destructive. But while I think it’s okay to make value judgments on beliefs, I think so many of us are so quick to label, categorize and dismiss human beings because of their beliefs.

But here’s the reality. We don’t really get to chose our beliefs. They are handed to us from our environment. Who of us came up with any our beliefs on our own? You can’t even have concepts or beliefs in your head without words. And where did you get those words? Did you make them up? Did you invent the word ‘God? Did you invent the words ‘science’, ‘humanism’, ‘good’, ‘evil’, ‘love’…? No, these words do not exist as something separate from your experience and environment. These words come to you with concepts and experiences that have been handed to you from your particular environment. And you either accept them, change them, or deny them, but even those decisions are largely out of your control. You will see what you will see, and those things cannot be un-seen. You will think with words that your environment hands you and you have no ability to unlearn those words or concepts. They are burned into your brain, and they always will be.

This sounds awfully fatalistic, but I don’t think it has to be. Because I believe that you can choose with your conscious mind what you want to do with the (un)beliefs that you have.
Back to the “up” thing. Even if you know God isn’t up there somewhere, perhaps you are a person that finds great solace in looking up while you pray or lifting your hands when you sing. Perhaps it makes you feel like a child looking up to a parent. Or perhaps it makes you feel lighter and more human, more connected and a part of everything. So maybe you decide to keep looking up sometimes. Maybe lifting your hands makes you feel like you are surrendering something of yourself to something or someone “higher” than yourself. Even though you realize the absurdity of thinking of God as some being that lives somewhere in the direction of Galaxy 54-tx42… You have a choice on what to do with that belief (or lack thereof) now. You can stop looking up. Or you can look up. That’s your decision. Unlike believing that the rabbit is not going to hit the floor when you drop it, that’s something you can actually choose.

Over the last year, I have had so many questions asked of me about what I believe. Just tonight I had a conversation with someone extremely close to me that said that he wouldn’t consider me a Christian anymore.
Why?

Not because of my life.. Not because my life looks like Jesus or doesn’t look like Jesus. But because of my lack of ability to nail down all the words and concepts of what I exactly BELIEVE. Because I’ve lost so many of the unconscious assumptions that I used to have and have no ability to un-see what I have seen.

I have no more ability to believe, for example, that the first people on earth were a couple named Adam and Eve that lived 6,000 years ago. I have no ability to believe that there was a flood that covered all the highest mountains of the world only 4,000 years ago and that all of the animal species that exist today are here because they were carried on an ark and then somehow walked or flew all around the world from a mountain in the middle east after the water dried up. I have no more ability to believe these things than I do to believe in Santa Clause or to not believe in gravity. But I have a choice on what to do with these unbeliefs. I could either throw out those stories as lies, or I could try to find some value in them as stories. But this is what happens…

If you try to find some value in them as stories, there will be some people that say that you aren’t a Christian anymore because you don’t believe the Bible is true or “authoritative”. Even if you try to argue that you think there is a truth to the stories, just not in an historical sense; that doesn’t matter. To some people, you denying the “truth” of a 6,000 year old earth with naked people in a garden eating an apple being responsible for the death of dinosaurs is the same thing as you nailing Jesus to the cross. You become part of ‘them’. The deniers of God’s Word.

The easy thing for me on the other side of my experience would be to see those who do believe in literal Genesis stories like that as somehow unenlightened or foolish. It would be easy and just as destructive for me to write off all THOSE people who believe those things as something less than beautiful, complicated and intelligent human beings. I must remember that the people that believe in a literal Genesis have no more ability to not believe it than I do to believe it. They have been handed a set of words, ideas and assumptions that they have built their consciousness on, and until something shifts for them, they see the world as they see it, and they can’t un-see it.

I think this understanding can help us see that all of us have assumptions and biases and beliefs and that we ought to be very slow in writing others off because of their words and concepts. That would almost be like writing them off because of the color of their skin or because they speak with a different accent or language than you.

So be careful of labels. Be careful who you judge as “in” or “out” of your camp. It’s a destructive way of seeing the world.

I think a healthier way of thinking about belief is to think about the kind of lives we choose to live with the words and beliefs that have been handed to us. Perhaps a more important question than whether God is a guy in the sky or the Ground of Being or the future, infinite Trinitarian relationality is what you will do with your assumptions of what God is or is not. Will you love God? Will you love your neighbor? Maybe these questions are far more important than what you BELIEVE about God or your neighbor. Maybe whether or not you do what Jesus said is more important than the language that use to describe Jesus.

I’m not saying that language is unimportant. It is important. Just not important enough to divide over. People are more important than ideas. Love is more important than the concept of love. We should never hurt or lessen the humanity of actual human beings because of the language, beliefs, and concepts that their environment and experiences have given them.

So, for me, I’ve decided to think about my ‘beliefs’ in terms of how I live rather than what my unconscious assumptions are. Because there are lots of people that have all sorts of beautiful ‘beliefs’ that live really awful lives. If I’m on the side of a road bleeding, I don’t care if the priest or the Levite have beautiful ‘beliefs’ about the poor and the hurting.. Give me the samaritan. The heretic. The outsider who may have the ‘wrong’ ‘beliefs’ in words and concepts but actually lives out the right beliefs by stopping and helping me. That’s the kind of belief I’m interested in at this point.

What do I believe? Look at my life. That’s what I believe. And that’s the kind of belief I’m interested in for my friends as well. I don’t care so much about what their words and unconscious assumptions are (even though that can make for some enjoyable pub conversation). I care about what kind of lives they live. Do they believe IN the underdog, or do they BELIEVE in the underdog? Do they believe in loving their neighbor or do they believe by loving their neighbor?

So you believe in God? So what. You believe Jesus was the Son of God that will someday come again to reconcile all things? Big deal. So do most serial killers.

Allow me to close this post with some words from the book of James, Chapter 2:
“What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”

But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”
Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.

You foolish person, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless?

Was not our father Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend. You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone.

In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction? As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.

Within the past few years, guys having a “side chick” has reached an all time high. There are songs, movies, and even books about being the other woman, which is pretty messed up.

You’d think men would “keep it 100” and tell you if they weren’t ready to be in a relationship with only one person (or that he’s actually already with someone when you meet).

Instead, they’ve gotten a lot more clever and underhanded in their tactics and they know how to keep their girlfriends and their side pieces separate.

Also, being a side chick is no longer an embarrassment to some women, which gives us men more reason to have one.

Here are a few signs that he’s actually in a relationship with someone else.

1. He buys you sh*t to keep you happy.

Hush gifts are things he buys for you when you start talking about serious sh*t, like moving in together, committing, or spending time with his family, and an argument sparks. Because he wants to keep you as his side chick, he finds your material weakness and plays on that to stray you away from the serious topics and also to keep youaround.

2. He seems completely disconnected when you get emotional with him.

When women date, they anticipate the time in their relationships when they fall for the guy and can tell him how they feel. However, if you open up to your man and tell him how you feel repeatedly and he doesn’t reciprocate and/or tries to downplay the entire topic, this could be a sign that his heart lies elsewhere.

3. You’re never invited to stay the night after sex.

As couples get more comfortable with each other, they tend to stay over at one another’s place after sex. However, if he leaves your apartment in the middle of the night, or makes sure you never stay over at his place, this is a definite red flag. Also, keep in mind, if he has a family or“main chick”, staying until dawn will never be an option.4. He refuses to show affection in public.

PDA (Public Display of Affection) should never be an issue in any relationship, so long as it’s within reason. But if you go to grab his hand and he pulls his away, or you never kiss or get too close when you’re out together, this could be a sign that you’re a side chick. This also gives him room to lie to his “main chick” about who you are if you two happen to be seen.5. He dodges every photo opportunity.

Everyone is on Facebook and Instagram posting their food, kids, and significant others. Snapchat and Whatsapp make every day a motion picture production. So if you notice that your guy is dodging selfies like bullets whenever you tilt your phone to take a picture,you may be a side chick.

6. You have a “secret spot” that he tries to play off as romantic.

Every couple has a favorite spot to eat or hang out. However, if he choses to always take you miles outside of the city or to venues with very little traffic, it’s a possibility he’s trying to be discreet about being out with you, without letting you know.Bonus

He always wants to meet late at night.

If you only meet after dark or after reasonable date hours, such as 11pm or later, chances are he has another life that he leads – the hours prior to those latenight “booty call” hours.He prefers to stay in when you’re together.

If your guy always strays away from going out or always wants to just come to your place to hang out, this is a major side chick indicator. There’s a difference between a guy being a homebody and trying to be sneaky with your relationship. Every couple has dinner at restaurants or goes on movie dates from time to time.You’re never invited to family gatherings.

If you have never met a guy’s parents and children or haven’t been to any events that include his friends, this is another side chick indicator.

He has to go suddenly whenever you’re on the phone.

When you speak to your guy on the phone, if he speaks to you in a very formal tone without even addressing you by name more often than not, that’s a definite sign you are a side chick. If he’s always gotta go suddenly or straight up hangs up on you out of nowhere from time to time, that’s probably because his actual girlfriend got home.

What comes first into your mind when someone suggests that homosexuality is wrong in 2017? “oh he’s primitive” “people are still religious?” “hypocrisy” “we are all sinners” or some will be compassionateenough to say “we understand, some people are closed minded, and you can’t blame them” lol yeah right. Typical bullying tactics.

Well, here’s my bold approach, I used to be naive too. I assumed that everyone is fair and driven by justice, and the interests of other people, fighting for human rights and the “greater good” until I studied political science and the laws of human nature. Adults and Human beings in general are driven by their own interests and that’s a fact. We are driven by our own selfish interests. No matter how much we pretend to be fair and try to act selfless. It’s almost impossible to see the world through someone else’s eyes. So most people choose not to. We choose to ignore the other side. We pretend to be nice and “socially acceptable” but behind the masks we are simmering with anger and other dark emotions. There’s no such thing as fighting for equality, I call bs. Anyone worth respect is and will be treated with respect. That’s a fact. The rest is politics. Having such kind of knowledge a sense of understanding helps you begin to look at things for what they are and not for what people sugar-coated the bullshit to be. Do we hate gays? NO. But Do we support their bullshit and sexual Perversion disguised as “human rights”? NO!

The reason why some people are gender confused is because they are under a delusion, because they take pleasure in Sin rather then the Truth. Some of them have come up with their own ideal of what they think God is about and not finding out who God really is. They have made a false God that they worship. Some are just worshiping them self, it’s all about them only ( selfish) could care less about anyone else’s happiness only their own. The God of Heaven will not allow a homosexual or transgender person in Heaven unless they hate that they are in SIN and struggling to pull themselves out of this Sin, by seeking Jesus to help them with repentance in there heart.2 Thessalonians 2:8 And then shall that Wicked be revealed, whom the Lord shall consume with the spirit of his mouth, and shall destroy with the brightness of his coming: 2:9 Even him, whose coming is after the working of Satan with all power and signs and lying wonders, 2:10 And with all deceivableness of unrighteousness in them that perish; because they received not the love of the truth, that they might be saved. 2:11 And for this cause. God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: 2:12That they all might be damned who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness.Deuteronomy 22:55 A woman must not wear men’s clothing, nor a man wear women’s clothing, for the Lord your God detests anyone who does this.1 Corinthians 6:9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,effeminate = Transgender abusers of themselves with mankind” in the King James Version (KJV): The KJV was finished 1611 CE when there was no single word in the English language that referred to homosexuals or homosexuality. The translators were forced to use this awkward phrase. The term “homosexual” was only created in the late 19th century. “homosexuals,” (NASB);“homosexual perversion,” (NEB);“homosexual offenders,” (NIV).ef·fem·i·nateəˈfemənət/adjective(of a man) having or showing characteristics regarded as typical of a woman; unmanly.synonyms: womanish, effete, foppish, unmanly, feminine; informalcamp, campy, flamingtrans·gen·dertransˈjendər,tranzˈjendər/adjectivedenoting or relating to a person whose self-identity does not conform unambiguously to conventional notions of male or female gender.“a transgender activist and author”G3120Original: μαλακόςTransliteration: malakosPhonetic: mal-ak-os’Thayer Definition:soft, soft to the touchmetaphorically in a bad senseeffeminateof a catamiteof a boy kept for homosexual relations with a manof a male who submits his body to unnatural lewdnessof a male prostituteOrigin: of uncertain affinityTDNT entry: NonePart(s) of speech: AdjectiveStrong’s Definition: Of uncertain affinity; soft, that is, fine (clothing); figuratively a catamite: – effeminate, soft.﻿

If you’ve been watching the headlines over the last couple years, you may have noticed the incredible surge of interest in affirming homosexuality. Whether it’s at the heart of a religious scandal, political corruption, radical legislation, or the redefinition of marriage, homosexual interests have come to characterize the world. That’s an indication of the success of the gay agenda. And some Christians,including somenational church leaders, have wavered on the issue even recently. But sadly, when people refuse to acknowledge the sinfulness of homosexuality—calling evil good and good evil (Isaiah 5:20)—they do so at the expense of many souls.

How should you respond to the success of the gay agenda?

Should you accept the recent trend toward tolerance? Or should you side with those who exclude homosexuals with hostility and disdain?

In reality, the Bible calls for a balance between what some people think are two opposing reactions—condemnation and compassion. Really, the two together are essential elements of biblical love, and that’s something the homosexual sinner desperately needs.

Homosexual advocates have been remarkably effective in selling their warped interpretations of passages in Scripture that address homosexuality. When you ask a homosexual what the Bible says about homosexuality—and many of them know—they have digested an interpretation that is not only warped, but also completely irrational. Pro-homosexual arguments from the Bible are nothing but smokescreens—as you come close, you see right through them.

God’s condemnation of homosexuality is abundantly clear—He opposes it in every age.

– In the patriarchs (Genesis 19:1-28)

– In the Law of Moses (Leviticus 18:22;

20:13)

– In the Prophets (Ezekiel 16:46-50)

– In the New Testament (Romans 1:18-27;

1 Corinthians 6:9-10; Jude 7-8)

Why does God condemn homosexuality? Because it overturns God’s fundamental design for human relationships—a design that pictures the complementary relationship between a man and a woman (Genesis 2:18-25; Matthew 19:4-6; Ephesians 5:22-33).

Why, then, have homosexual interpretations of Scripture been so successful at persuading so many?

Simple: people want to be convinced. Since the Bible is so clear about the issue, sinners have had to defy reason and embrace error to quiet their accusing consciences (Romans 2:14-16). As Jesus said, “Men loved the darkness rather than the Light, [because] their deeds were evil” (John 3:19-20).

As a Christian, you must not compromise what the Bible says about homosexuality—ever. No matter how much you desire to be compassionate to the homosexual, your first sympathies belong to the Lord and to the exaltation of His righteousness. Homosexuals stand in defiant rebellion against the will of their Creator who from the beginning “made them male and female” (Matthew 19:4).

Don’t allow yourself to be intimidated by homosexual advocates and their futile reasoning—their arguments are without substance. Homosexuals, and those who advocate that sin, are fundamentally committed to overturning the lordship of Christ in this world. But their rebellion is useless, for the Holy Spirit says, “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10; cf.

Galatians 5:19-21).

So, what is God’s response to the homosexual agenda?

Certain and final judgment. To claim anything else is to compromise the truth of God and deceive those who are perishing.

As you interact with homosexuals and their sympathizers, you must affirm the Bible’s condemnation. You are not trying to bring damnation on the head of homosexuals, you are trying to bring conviction so that they can turn from that sin and embrace the only hope of salvation for all of us sinners—and that’s through faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. Homosexuals need salvation. They don’t need healing—homosexuality is not a disease. They don’t need therapy—homosexuality is not a psychological condition. Homosexuals need forgiveness, because homosexuality is a sin.

I don’t know how it happened, but a few decades ago someone branded homosexuals with the worst misnomer—”gay.” Gay used to mean happy, but I can assure you, homosexuals are not happy people. They habitually seek happiness by following after destructive pleasures. There is a reason Romans 1:26 calls homosexual desire a “degrading passion.” It is a lust that destroys the physical body, ruins relationships, and brings perpetual suffering to the soul—and its ultimate end is death (Romans 7:5). Homosexuals are experiencing the judgment of God (Romans 1:24, 26, 28), and thus they are very, very sad.

First Corinthians 6 is very clear about the eternal consequence for those who practice homosexuality—but there’s good news. No matter what the sin is, whether homosexuality or anything else, God has provided forgiveness, salvation, and the hope of eternal life to those who repent and embrace the gospel. Right after identifying homosexuals as those who “will not inherit the kingdom of God,” Paul said, “Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:11).

God’s plan for many homosexuals is that they come to salvation. There were former homosexuals in the Corinthian church back in Paul’s day, just as there are many former homosexuals today in my church and in faithful churches around the country. With regenerated hearts, they sit in biblical churches throughout the country praising their Savior, along with former fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, thieves, coveters, drunkards, revilers, and swindlers. Remember, such were some of you too.

What should be your response to the homosexual agenda?

Make it a biblical response—confront it with the truth of Scripture that condemns homosexuality and promises eternal damnation for all who practice it. What should be your response to the homosexual? Make it a gospel response—confront him with the truth of Scripture that condemns him as a sinner, and point him to the hope of salvation through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ. Stay faithful to the Lord as you respond to homosexuality by honoring His Word, and leave the results to Him.

I welcome all kinds of replies. Reblog, criclsize. Let the truth be spoken.
​PS: we don’t want to be mean to gays; we want to expose them when they’re being bullies.

One huge contributing factor to why many relationships fail today and increase in homosexuality is because a lot of men have Daddy Issues! Yeah I said it.

New age Socialites and the stereotypical ‘exotic’ dancers aren’t the only ones inflicted with this debilitating hindrance. The average “Johnte” asking for your number in the mall is likely to have Daddy issues the size of a small island too. They may not be the same as the next man’s, but even though this topic is rarely addressed, (ironically because it’s not manly), it continually stalks the psyche, (often unconsciously), of many.

The world today has changed so much that individuality (Narcissism) is the new trend, doing things the way you want is correct and this includes parenting and relationships. It’s funny, how many people believe the human superiority complex. As the dominant species on the planet, too many make the incorrect assumption that we’re born with all the necessary skills to have a good relationship. I beg to differ.

These skills are acquired, and most people, (male and female alike), fail to acquire their own skills through the assumption that they already possess them; and so the cycle of relationship breakdown continues. Men with Daddy issues, have to recognise them and acquire the skills to effectively deal with them, point blank.

Deep down, every man wants to live the fairy-tale too… just like women. Yet we berate the opposite sex for being stereotypically idealistic…living in a dream world. However, all men desire the beautiful wife, home, lifestyle and memories. We want children who harness our emotional thermometer, making them easy to love by generating uncontrollable fits of laughter to overwhelming feelings of being proud; all with an architect’s precision which makes us feel alive.

But most men learn not to chase this dream. Daddy issues can prevent this, creating enough cracks in a male’s emotional foundation, no matter how impressive his armour is! If the dream comes to us then ‘great’! We’ll handle it, just like a man’s supposed to do – efficiently. However, there’s no way we’re planning for this TV-show existence.

Each man can have his own daddy issues!

Perhaps your dad didn’t come and watch you play at the basketball game. Was your place in the team based on his stellar reputation of how good he used to be in sports? Maybe you were just doing it to make him proud. Nevertheless, we all know there’s no point being a chip off the old block, if the block isn’t there to see it.

Daddy issues can cause harm when it comes to dating, on the extreme it can lead to confusion in someone’s sexual orientation (Making someone think that they are gay just like it can cause lesbianism in women)

Signs your man has daddy issues

Almost every modern man has daddy issues.
I’m not saying this in a dismissive way. Each one of these wonderful men was deeply impacted by the behavior of a father who was abusive, emotionally cold, or just plain not there.

Unless you’re some freak of nature (always a possibility) there’s a strong likelihood that the man you’re dating could be a dude with daddy issues all his own.

Let me tell you the most important thing before we go any further: this is a man who needs and deserves love.

But loving and dating him isn’t always going to be easy. In fact, some times it can be damn rough.

Here are 6 problems you might face dating a man with daddy issues.

1. He’s got a hidden (or not so hidden) anger

His friends describe him as the life of the party. He’s sweet and funny, a total goofball and a giant pushover. But he’s got a lot of anger simmering inside him. It can manifest in a lot of weird ways. Something as simple as fallen quiche could send him spiraling.

But you know what, I mean, he did make you a quiche so there is that.

2. The idea of kids could freak him out

Sure, guys of all sorts have issues when it comes to talking about a future, but your guy takes it to the extreme. You smile at a cute baby passing on the street and when you turn to look at him there’s just a him shaped cloud where the dude used to be.3. He will be weird with your dad

He’s charming as the day is long. He meets your friends and they love him, he even manages to charm your mother. But he’s weird with your dad. If he agrees to meet him at all he’s hostile and sullen.
He can’t separate his own dad from what it means to be any dad at all.

4. He has a hard time opening up

By month three of dating, he’s got a pretty solid sense of who you are, where you come from. Of course, there’s still a shit ton to learn, but there’s a foundation. But you know almost nothing about him. You know where he lives, you know what music he likes, you know he makes he laugh until you want to pee, but, that’s kind of it.
He’s a closed book, not by choice, but because he’s had to be.

5. He can’t say “I love you”

Even if he really, really wants to say ‘I love you’, it’s just not possible. It’s buried deep in his throat. You can tell he cares when he smiles at you or lets loose a comfort-fart in your presence.
But for him love equals pain, and he’ll do anything to avoid feeling that way ever again.

6. Fighting with him is impossible

Try fighting with a guy who has daddy issues. Try it. I dare you. It’s impossible. Like a crab, he will retreat deep into his shell before he’ll risk expressing his feelings in front of you.

Unless he’s drunk in which case he might start sobbing and tell you about how his dad walked out on him for a life of drugs when he was five.How to deal with daddy issues

All men are told to ‘be a man’; which is hard enough if you don’t know how. However, it’s even more so for those boys who are told to ‘be like your old man’; knowing full well, that his 6 foot 2 inch muscular frame is something that your 5 foot 7 inch stick-thin physique is unlikely to ever emulate.

Perhaps your dad was the most intelligent, forward-thinking and achievement compiling male of his professional environment; and knowing this placed a psychological pressure on you, rather than the physical one to achieve something of comparative brilliance.

Or maybe your dad was just crap. Did he leave your mum for another woman? Damage her so badly with the open nature of his extenuating sexual exploits or controlling dominance that neither you nor her ever recovered? Most Dads just don’t know how to be a Dad.

There is no parenting manual – and he was likely to have had daddy issues of his own!

This doesn’t mean that these Dads didn’t give it their best. However, sometimes they just don’t know how to love; so he justifies his love with materialistic gifts or hollow promises.

Maybe he struggled to express any emotion effectively besides anger and laughter; and you didn’t want to be on the receiving end of either of them. His anger may destroy your face whilst his laughter, (directed at you, not with you), might contribute to the destruction of your self-esteem.

And as we know, some guys had the pleasure of their Dad being an amalgamation of all these characteristics or worse, maybe yours just didn’t exist… an unknown spectre casting the biggest shadow over any of your personal qualities or achievements. Rearing its head by the most innocuous of questions such as ‘who’s your dad?’ Some men grow up with a mother, who blames you for your absent father’s shortcomings and any resemblance in you, magnifies your daddy issues exponentially.

And these are just the tip of the iceberg but before you know it, you’re 21+, a man yourself so to speak. So what do men do? We play the stereotype…. Hard!

Sleeping with lots of women; getting into physical fights, refusing to back down, (even if it’s stupid); pursuing the financial/materialistic kudos of our age/social group. Hiding our emotions and of course never shedding a tear – unless it’s of significant purpose, like the passing of our mother of course. Even then, some men contemplate using sunglasses.

We can’t be seen to be acting like a bitch or pussy, we have to take it like a man. We have to ‘man-up’. Some women even scream this in your direction, (which is even worse, because that means she IS looking at you like a bitch or pussy), which can result in some silly retaliatory behaviour. You can see why some men would act in such a way. However, is it possible for him to have learned to deal with the daddy issues that he might be unaware of?

Regardless of the answer, the cycle has to be broken. Remember, society is powerful enough to mould and shape the majority of its individuals beyond belief. This is the world that men are navigating; a world of perpetuating daddy issues. Whilst consciously, (or unconsciously), dealing with these internal demons, he has to find a way to come out on top. He thinks he has to beat all these other men he is competing with… and then he meets a pretty girl….

Most of the time, certain women indulge in prostitution out of a need for financial resources. However, in today’s world, love of authority and fame, or even the simple need to be maintained by men in return for sex, often propels women into this path voluntarily hoeizm. If you see these signs in the woman you are currently dating you need no soothsayer to tell you that she’s definitely a whore.

||| Disclaimer: this post might offend most women (and deluded men) . You might want to turn back if you’re not comfortable with the truth)

Signs to look out for :

Before writing this article, I did proper research from both my male and female friends including the older ones. These signs are more accurate than you think maybe you will learn that later in life if you haven’t interacted with lots of women already. These signs are the most likely ones to find in promiscuous women. The more the signs, the bigger the Whore.

In my previous articles, we have already established the fact that women will do anything(including literally wear masks) to cover up for their slutty behavior and to avoid being “judged” by the society. Understand why many will frown upon reading this article. Be ware Especially of the “Innocent Looking” girls in the hood, they hate the publicizing of such information so they can keep using sex as a weapon against you dummies.

PS: These are just signs and not evidence of any kind of behavior. These are not perfect tell tales so don’t jump into conclusion yet. Whores are not bad human beings. Just like Playas, But for real tho. Are they worth your time?

Pps: Be ware of hoes in denial that’s a whole different article. They are worse than actual whores.

Piercings out of the ordinary places (anywhere else except for the normal ones on earlobes) that’s a big sign.

2. Lust for material things

She’s obsessed about money and is excessively materialistic. When her thinking is always about money, she can easily be seduced with offer of money and sometimes asks you for money after sex. She might even be running current bank accounts with an undisclosed source of income. If a young woman suddenly starts buying Louis Vuitton fashions, hanging out at expensive big city discos and taking out of state vacations, you should worry. All these things require a great deal of ready cash. Whores think about buying latest wigs, latest expensive wears, and even rides posh cars. They are so desperate in having money and opening their legs for anything so far it brings out money. They despise poverty and men who have low income.

Listen to Louis Vuitton by Fabolous x J. Cole

3. Inability to show Affection

A whore can never display affection to her partner in public. She will always give excuses for why she can’t. Modern decent women have no problem with light petting or affectionate display in public. If she dislikes your hand on her thigh or complains about a casual brush on her ass when in public, it is a sign of emotional disconnection from you or a sign that you are below her standard and you are just a customer she’d like to be intimate with in private. If she’s already been intimate with you before, she ironically dresses sexily or she comes from a sexualized cultural background, this post-sex public self consciousness becomes an even greater red flag.

4. Always visits the gym

The gym is ripe with opportunity for women to sex. It is an atmosphere where everyone has tight, revealing clothing and everyone is there to work up a sweat. You add the testosterone that people are bound to produce through exercise and the taut, muscular bodies that inhabit the gym and you have the perfect recipe for an affair. And the trainers have an intense, personal relationship with the people that they train. Their job is to push your woman to do more than she thought she could. They are charismatic motivators and muscle bound who touch your woman regularly in all places that you dream about touching her.

Trainers know how to talk to women because their job dictates that they build solid relationships with them. So, if your girl is always at the gym but not losing weight, then her trainer is pushing her hard, but from behind with no clothes on her body

First of all, women normally ask these types of questions first, so the fact that you had to ask her is your first indicator that she might be slutty. But anyway, whenever you ask her about her past, she changes the subject. When she is cornered on the subject, she blows you instead of answering you (in case you missed that, she just solved her problem with sex). Even though you asked her how many people that she slept with first, she asks you what your number is and then gives you a number that is lower than that. This means that either your girlfriend has been in the backseat of so many cars that she has lost count or she knows that 167 sex partners is a lot for anybody.

6. Speaks in favor of prostitutes & openly supports LGBT

When she’s fond of speaking out in favor of prostitutes and admires famous women who engage in prostitution that means she is definitely one.

Her role models and sympathies often lie with the ideology and lifestyle she’s affiliated with. She doesn’t look down on women who indulge in prostitution and she sees nothing bad in it. This is usually to avoid the guilt that’s killing her inside. They also refer to it as #slutshaming

7. She smokes and drinks (Typical Party Girl)

Smoking is a great and wonderful outlet for women to be in a very intimate one on one situation with a man with a perfect deniability of intent. People who are always drunk are usually attempting to escape their everyday lives through self-soothing. When men drink excessively, they usually go home alone. When women drink excessively, they almost never go home alone. Alcohol allows ladies to be more promiscuous and supplies an excuse for the sleaziness. Most escalations with women that happen at parties follow a similar pattern. She’s found of drinking with a guy, Smokes with a guy that will turn to intimate conversation and then to an inappropriate behavior. If you don’t smoke and she does, that’s a bad sign.

8. Late night jobs

A whore tends to have jobs working late at nights, such jobs are often refer to as “Whore creating” Such as working in a stripper’s club, bar, modeling industry or she hails from the sex industry hotspots of the world. More so if these jobs are in an environment where big men are willing to spend money to get sex, such a woman finds it easy to make side money aside from the normal income or when you show up at her job, someone always tell you that she just left. When you call her, she always calls you back after initially not answering the phone. Now, think hard. When is the last time you had sex. Believe me, if she is not doing the no-pants dance at night with you, then she is doing somebody else.

9. She has trust issues

A whore always has trust issues, even when you have proven yourself over and over again to her. She has emotional problems while forming attachments. It usually happens if she’s beginning to have feelings for you or it could be her mother has indoctrinated her against men. Her trust issues are a projection of her revulsion for men cheating on their women who’ve paid to shag her. She fears that you would do the same to her with another woman. She might want to be attached to you but memories of her customers prevent her.

She goes away for the weekend with her ‘friends’ a lot, Don’t think that females won’t cover for each other like men do. They surely will. The closer the friendship the more likely they will cover for one another. It might just be for the sole purpose of meeting men to hook up with. She travels a lot with her guy friends even she couldn’t afford it. Tells you its official or they are her distant cousins or uncles she’s traveling with.

11. Shaved or bleached Vaginal Region

Since the private part is her main source of income, your babe will always invest a great deal of time and money making it appear like an exclusive, extravagant luxury. Also be on the lookout for vaginal bleaching a new fad that is being promoted by the pornography industry.

On the other hand, your babe might not be a prostitute by deed, but by mind. If you are yet to be married and she has all these traits, you really need to think twice before tying the knot with her.12. She always brings up the subject of sex first

The more explicitly she talks about sex before you’ve banged her, the likelier she has a storied slutty past.

She also suggests kinky sex acts

If you’ve been dating a short while and she eagerly implores you for public sex before the glow of bedroom missionary sex has worn off, you’ve got a slut.13. Feminist / Bosslady

Feminists believe that men and women should be equal, in short, her vagina knows more dick than your dick knows vagina.

Where does she earn her living to afford the lavish lifestyle that most rich people can’t?

Self-explanatory14. She’s neurotic and disagreeable

Also known as anti-slut defense.

Emotionally flighty girls are vaginally flighty girls. They are ruled by their vaginas. If she’s the gossipy, backstabbing, conniving sort who drips with sarcasm and generally disdains everyone around her, you can bet her black soul will seek sustenance on a carousel of cock.15. She frequently goes commando. (Pantyless)

Yeah, as guys, we think it’s hot when we slide our hands under our girlfriends’ dresses during dinner in a fancy restaurant and discover a panty-less pussy waiting for us, but what if you notice she’s sans underwear while you’re both shopping in Naivas? At a family day out? In church?

16. She’s got that crazy, hyper, coked-up look in her eyes.

Also known as Slut-Face

You will know it when you look into a girl’s eyes for some time, look at her and focus into her eyes.. You will see usually a mix of confusion, guilt and looking like they are high on drugs 24/7. (Watch Nairobi Diaries, Focus on Pendo’s eyes)

17. Gets 100+ Likes on her Social Media

Welcome to attention whore land! Chicks who can’t breathe without being the center of attention are chicks who are unable to control their craving for fresh cock. You want to be on the lookout for manic depressives and girls who can’t make it through a ten minute conversation without screeching in phony excitement.

Show biz, Issa Massive Vagina-Lubricated Industry. In the world of Fame, Pussy Turns the Wheels. Don’t ask me how they get the tickets to all the events. Wink.

19. She shows a lot of cleavage all the time.

No worries if she’s accentuating her tits on the first date to entice you, but if she’s got those colliding death stars displayed for the world to admire every time you’re out with her,…duh

The bigger the Cleavage the bigger the Whore. The Same rule applies to high-heels.

20. Her Role-Models are all Well known Whores

She’s followingthe Whores that she looks up to. Her Instagram feed is usually full of Kim Kardashian, Huddah Monroe, Vera Sidika and other celebrity whores.

21. Her Instagram followers/following ratio is 100:1

3 Words : AttentionSeeking Whore.

22. She *really* seems to know what she’s doing in bed.

Hey man, nothing like getting a BJ from a chick who knows how to hit the underside with her tongue, but it does make you wonder how much dick it required for her to reach that level of professionalism.23. She has an impressive collection of vibrators and admits to masturbating to porn.

She’s a high testosterone sex fiend who values sexual novelty more than pair bonding. This type of girl is a creature of her id. High T girls are easy to spot. Check for forearm hair, narrow hips, broad shoulders, a penchant for cursing, a flat ass (adjusted for race), career ambition, and status whoring.

24. She asks you how many women you’ve slept with or accuses you of being a playa for no reason.

One word: projection.25. She seems “hard”

If she’s got that tough, soljagurl aura about her, like she’s been through dating hell and back, and her cynicism is worse than yours, you know she’s been used like a cheap whore.

26. She’s incredibly circumspect or incredibly forthcoming about her past or sex in general

In the course of a few dates, occasionally the conversation turns to past loves or sexual experiences, or views on men and women and the dating scene. Don’t confuse this for Honesty. Normally, these exchanges are blessedly brief and act as useful springboards for other topics, but when she seems like she’s hiding something big you’ve got a right to be suspicious. Listen for tells that give the game away. Stuff like “Oh well, we all have our skeletons”. Or “I’ve learned so much growing up.” Or “Men are pigs.” (The last one usually said by a record breaking slut.) Naturally, you want to write off any girl as GF material who brags about her CRAZY and WILD college years. Believe me, those years included more than college.

27. She’s an artsy type

Or a lawyer. The paradox of femininity is that it is often both the ultrafeminine and ultramasculine women who have racked up big numbers of men.28. She never has a break between men longer than one week and can’t live without complaining.

If she’s the type who can’t stand to be single and monkey swings from one man to the next, sometimes with sperm-sharing overlap, odds are high she’s a slut.

29. You’re tapping her for the first time and she doesn’t remind you to put on a condom. Or she even encourages you not to use one.

We men have an excellent fallback system for flushing out the sluts. If we think you’ve been around, we act as if we’re going to rawdog you, only to reach for the condom at the last possible second. If you haven’t reminded us to put one on during the long pre-penetration buildup, and it looks like you’d have been OK taking our unwrapped meat, we have all the evidence we need that you’re a skank.

30. She never stops shit testing you.

A girl who is constantly testing you for alpha congruency is a girl who would jump to another man the moment you betatize yourself. Worthy girls keep the shyt testing to a bare minimum. Turn on your love light, baby. (shyt tests = tests of your manhood, things that women do to put you on the defensive and cause drama)31. She buys you a lot of gifts.

I’m not sure why this is a leading indicator of sluttiness, but in my experience it is. Especially if she showers you with little gifts early in the relationship. I open the floor to a discussion of theories for this particular observation.

32. She’s OK with making out in clubs.

Self-explanatory.

The list is long. You might add other signs you have experienced too in the comment section.

Common Hoe Excuses

So if your girlfriend is an attention whore (or you think she is), then you have to do a couple of things:

Have a lot of patience. The only way you can date a girl who is an attention whore is to be a man of great patience. You have to have the utmost self-security and self-assurance. You have to know that you’re the best man in her life and that she will crave attention no matter what you do. In fact, if you try to fight her attention creating tendencies, then you will only work against yourself.

Be a strong leader. An attention whore will only stay loyal to a man who is strong enough to keep her in line . If you are not such a man, then you will walk into a world of hurt.

Be a great lover. Attention whores usually have very high sex drives. They spend time fantasizing about the best lovers . So if you can’t rock her world in the bedroom, then she is very likely to seek out someone else who she thinks can get the job done.

So if you can’t do any of these outlined things – and in some cases even if you can — the best thing to do with an attention whore is to break up with her . You will save yourself a lot of pain and frustration in the long run. And you can use all of your newfound energy to find a girl who is much more well-adjusted and loyal. This may be somewhat painful to hear or act upon, but the most beneficial things in life often are.

WRAPPING UP

Beware of the attention whore.

She brings nothing but bad news into your life.

They say that knowledge provides us with the greatest power. And now you have the power to know whether or not a girl is simply stringing you along. And if she is, then you have no choice but to cut that string. You now have no excuses (and no, her being one of the most beautiful women you have ever seen is not an excuse). You are a man. You are better than that.

And as they say: you can’t turn an attention whore into a housewife.

PS: Sluts & Whores are not bad humans. They are just not the best type for relationships.

One study concluded that women tend to cheat when they are dissatisfied with their relationship as a whole and seek what is missing elsewhere

Reasons Why Women Cheat

By Bell Kariuki
Most of us cheat and are cheated on at some point , whether it gets revealed or not. Here’s how to spot whether your woman has a bit on the side.

Men and women tend to two-time for different reasons: research suggests that the majority of men stray in search of get-the-job-done sex, whereas women want their sizzle with a side of emotional connection. My study however concluded that women tend to cheat when they are dissatisfied with their relationship as a whole and seek what is missing elsewhere. But when it came to male cheaters, I found that 56% claimed to be “happily married.”

Is it, therefore, easier to spot when a woman is cheating simply by analysing her behaviour in your own relationship? Here are the types to watch out for:

1. The centre of the universe

Some women will go in a relationship with the expectation that you are equipped and willing to meet her every whim. Maybe she’ll set you up to fail, maybe she’s just pushing her luck, maybe she pins all her hopes and dreams on one person and feels justified in taking her wild expectations elsewhere when you inevitably fail to meet her demands.

2. The virgin/whore

Perhaps she hasn’t even asked you for what she really wants because she’s worried about what you’ll think, or because she struggles to see you as the father of her kids and the guy who gets super dirty with her. Her primary partner cannot or will not satisfy her, so she goes somewhere else.

3. The endorphin junkie

This chronic honeymooner craves the emotional excitement that comes with discovering, desiring, and seducing a new partner.

4. The fragile ego

Women with a fickle sense of self-esteem can seek evidence of their worth in the romantic advances of other men, rather than gleaning validation in a meaningful way in their existing relationship. “Players” often lack self-esteem; the constant need to feel desired by another person reveals they are probably not very secure in themselves and instead place inflated value on the attention of the opposite sex.

5. The “good guy”

They want to break up but are too scared to be the bad guy, bite the bullet and dump you. Or maybe they are scared of being alone and want to audition your replacement beforehand.

“IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT”

But seriously, at some point you’ll be ready to answer the question: what part did I play in it? Ninety per cent of people who cheat believe that they are justified in doing so. Are you stingy with emotional support? She may feel abandoned and isolated. Remember, intimacy is not just about sex, it’s about non-physical connections, commitment and mutual emotional investment. Have you committed a betrayal that remains unresolved? She may seek revenge. Are you equal partners or does she feel exploited emotionally or practically? With our relationship “roles” becoming evermore flexible and fragmented, are you on the same page about what each of you expects from the other?

How do you know if she is cheating?

(besides the strange rash)?

No relationship is perfect. If you still want to be together, try to work it out when things inevitably get difficult

Is she truly being distant, or have past experiences caused you to jump to the conclusion that people will inevitably hurt you? If she has cheated before, she may think it’s OK to do again, and it would be naive to ignore past examples of a two-timing character. There are some pretty impressive surveillance techniques and body-language give-aways, but that’s another article altogether so for now I’ll suggest the obvious: ask the question. Bear in mind that if you even have to ask, trust has somehow already been eroded and this issue, whatever it turns out to be, needs confronting.

Now, you’ve discovered she has been unfaithful – do you want to take her back?

No relationship is perfect. What makes it pretty damn close to perfect, though, is if you still want to be together and try to work it out when things inevitably get difficult. In order to repair the relationship, you need to truly understand and be prepared to analyse why she did it. Taking someone back doesn’t necessarily make you a fool; it takes a lot of strength, patience and self-assurance to see beyond that betrayal. Want to know whether you are a doormat? Ask yourself whether you believe this was just a one-time mistake, or just the first time she makes it.

The reason why women like jerks or bad boys is that their confidence and behavior triggers feelings of attraction inside of the woman.

The same applies to us guys…

You have most-likely been going through life saying that you want a nice, intelligent girl that you can trust, rely on and proudly introduce to your family and friends. Yet, you are also attracted to slutty strippers.

Strippers are bad girls are you can’t stop yourself from feeling attracted to them, even though you want to get a nice, pretty girl that doesn’t show off her naked body to hundreds of men every night.

Almost All Women Want to Find a Good Guy, Not a Bad Boy

If you’ve seen beautiful, intelligent women lust after jerks and bad boys, you might have come to the conclusion that women must prefer bad men.

Yet, it’s not true.

Almost all women (99%) would prefer to be with a good guy who ALSO makes her feel sexually attracted, but if none of those guys are available (they usually aren’t. Hence why you will often hear women saying, “Where are all the real men??” ) a woman will hook up with other guys who can make her feel attracted, which are usually the jerks or bad boys.

Why doesn’t being nice to a woman make her feel attracted? Let me try to make you understand…

There is NOTHING wrong with being nice to a woman (I am nice to women and I “almost” had sex with more than 250 of them, before recently settling down with a sexy, 26 year old even though I’m 24 years old), but you ALSO have to make her feel sexually attracted to you.

If your main approach to women is just to be nice and hope that they like you enough because you’re such a good guy, then you’re always going to get rejected and the spark is always going to die in your relationships.

Do You Even Know How to Attract Women?

Back when I had no idea how to attract women, I used to look on at women and think, “WTF? Why is she with that guy?”

I’d see beautiful, intelligent women with guys who looked like thugs, low-IQ idiots or douchebags. It just didn’t make any sense. From my perspective, I thought that I was approaching the situation correctly…

I was (and still am) a nice, good guy with good intentions. Yet, no matter how much I showed that to women, they didn’t care! They just rejected me. Why? NOTHING that I was saying and doing was making the women feel sexually attracted to me.

It was only years later that I eventually realized the real reason why a lot of good guys fail with women…

Women Don’t Want a Bad Man

Women are not desperately seeking a bad man who will treat them like crap.

However, most women would rather be with a man who doesn’t really care if he loses her, instead of being with a guy who needs her for his emotional security and sense of identity.

Why? Simple…women find it extremely easy to attract men for sex. If a woman is attractive, pretty much every guy in the world is willing to stick his dick in her at least once.

Based on this reality, the majority of women get to the point where they want a guy to be more of a challenge to impress and seduce. Here’s why…

Almost all women want a good man, who also has the ability to make her feel attracted to him. Women do NOT want a bad man who will cause them harm, treat them badly, cheat on them, etc.

If you are going through life thinking that women like jerks and bad boys because they want to be treated badly, you are wrong.

Women are not seeking bad men who will hurt them. Women are simply looking for a good guy who isn’t a pushover. She doesn’t want you to be instantly impressed by her and willing to have sex and a relationship with her simply because you feel attracted to her physical appearance.

She wants you to realize the reality that she lives in (i.e. most guys would bang her) and then allow her to have the experience of trying to impress you enough to get you interested. She wants to feel lucky to get a chance with you, rather than feeling like you’re just another horny guy who is hoping to get a chance with her.

She Doesn’t Want You to Behave Like a Pussy, she already has one.

In many movies, you will see a man being super nice, sweet and romantic to a woman.

Throughout the movie, the woman will be “swept off her feet” by his niceness and generosity and after he saves the day, saves the world or saves her from danger (or a bad boy), they will fall in love and live happily ever after.

Women cry when they watch those movies and say, “Oh, he’s so sweet…I wish a man would treat me that way,” yet what most guys don’t realize is that women don’t find a guy’s niceness appealing UNLESS they are SEXUALLY attracted to him.

In the movies, the scriptwriters turn the sweet, romantic guy into a confident hero who saves the day, which then makes the woman feel attracted to him. In real life, you don’t get to save the day and you have to attract her in other ways…

If your main approach to women is to be nice, sweet and innocent, then your main response will be rejection and disappointment. Women DO want to find themselves a good guy, but if she doesn’t feel turned on by you when she interacts with you, she isn’t going to care how nice, sweet and good you are.

She might like you as a friend or even lead you on and pretend that she likes you or will stay with you for life (if you happen to get her into a relationship), but she will always leave herself open to being seduced by other guys.

If you want to be successful at picking up women and then keeping a woman in a relationship, you have to offer more than just being a good guy. A woman wants to feel sexual attraction for you, not just nice, friendly feelings.

Yo do NOT have to become a bad boy or be a jerk to women, but you do need to start saying and doing the types of things that actually make women feel turned on. If you don’t do that, you can’t expect women to suddenly change their natural instincts.

Just like you can’t help yourself from being attracted to strippers or sluts in porn, women can’t help themselves from being attracted to the sorts of things that I teach here at bellkariuki.wordpress.com .

These Days, You Have to Start With Kissing and Sex

In the past, women were completely dependant on men for their survival. A woman’s life was essentially about growing up, finding herself a nice gentleman for a husband, raising a family and then dying.

Since it was shameful to divorce, a woman had to select a man based on how nice he was and how well set up he was to support her and their family.

In 1900 for example, the divorce rate was less than 10% across the developed world, whereas it’s an average of about 50% these days.

In today’s world, women select men based on how much sexual attraction they feel. Women know that they don’t need to settle down with the first guy they have sex with. Instead of saving her virginity for marriage, a woman will have sex with whomever she likes and settle down whenever she feels like it.

This is one of the reasons why the nice guy approach doesn’t work anymore. The nice guy approach comes on too strong with a relationship vibe, whereas most women just want to take you for a “test drive” first and see how they feel.

Instead of trying to get women to give you a chance by being nice to them, you need to make them feel attracted to you and then escalate to kissing and sex. After you’ve had sex, both of you can then decide whether or not you just want to keep having sex or maybe start a relationship…

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