My son, Joseph, died on May 26, 2005 after one hour on earth. This blog helped me sort through my feelings and prepare for his sister, Eleanor Grace, born in July 2006. Here's the ongoing saga of learning to parent after a loss.

Friday, May 19, 2006

Well! That was fun.

(warning: TMI.)

I've been having this sneaking feeling that his baby is coming early - I mean, even earlier than I'm already scheduled for. I don't know why, maybe just the fact that I seem so big - I haven't gained weight all around, except for my face, but the belly sticks out SO far - and the fact that I'm already so achy and uncomfortable.

This morning when I got to work, I stopped to use the ladies' room, and discovered two biggish clumps of clear mucus - almost like EWCM, but stickier. I had a lot of that in the very beginning of pregnancy, and knew it was normal, but I hadn't seen any in so long that I got a little freaked. When I went into labor with Joseph I lost my plug that same morning, and there was no mistaking it since it had blood in it and I was already having contractions.

I wasn't in a panic, but I talked to Andy and decided I should call the doctor, just in case. When I spoke with the nurse, they said as long as I was downtown for work anyway, I might as well come in. So I went in and met with a CNM in Dr. Riley's office.

And, as I suspected, I'm fine. She checked my cervix and I'm 1 cm dilated, but she said that's normal for someone who's already had a baby. My cervix is as long as it's possible to be, which is good. And although the baby's head down (what I thought was her head on the upper left is actually her butt), she's still "floating" and not engaged in the pelvis. I got the usual warning about calling if I had painful contractions or bleeding, and was sent back to work.

I feel a little silly, but overall, I'm glad I went. I'd rather go and have it be nothing than not go and have it be something.

3 Comments:

Well, it's glad to have some more news about you!!!!I think baby-girl stuff is SO adorable, I'm already planning on buying something for my soon-to-be niece...I think you're getting pretty good, with your brother and SIL, I think finally "love wins" (that sounds really cheesy but it's true).I hope you can enjoy this month and a half (that's it or a little more?), everything's going to be great, I'm sure of that!!!!!Keep us informed!!