Kim’s Kritic’s Korner

I’m still lookin’ for some new retailers outside of New Mexico. I welcome any suggestions. My biggest hurdle is to get these stores to understand that Los Dias de los Muertos is a very festive holiday and is not a Halloween thing. It’s also difficult explaining that my work sells year round and it’s least impact, is during Halloween. Go figure. Also, my work really caters to the Hispanic community and I truly feel a lot of retailers are ignoring this large population.

Anybody have any suggestions on how I can explain my work any better? If they would just give my work a chance. So many of my existing retailers are doing gang-buster business with my Dedware that I just know when others outside this great State get a chance to purchase it, the stores would be happy.

I’m also looking for licensing companies who also may want to chance it. I’m dying to get my new dinnerware line out there, but I don’t have the resources. Oh poor me….blah-blah-blah!!! Plus, a lot of my work can be mass produced given the right opportunity. So, is anybody listening out there?? Can’t ya help an aspiring artist achieve their dreams???

After a recent rejection into a show and web site for artisans, I thought it was time to develop my own site. Yes, there are many sites now that allow artists to have access to in order to gain sales and/or recognition, but none that really pursue the little guy. And I mean little, as in they have no computer sometimes, they can’t afford to do even the least expensive shows, and they just don’t have the means to show their work.

So my friend and I are going to develop such a site for the little guy. It should be slow at first, but I truly believe it will pick up speed. You see, shows and other artists’ sites, charge some pretty high fees for a starting artist. There is a lot of jurying goin’ on, and that’s just old news. Most of the time the jurors have lost touch with the beginning artist and they tend to be a little too “mightier than thou” to truly think outside the box.

So, in a nutshell…no more jurored anything. It’s time this little nobody shows everyone else that she’s a somebody. I don’t need a table of folks judging me and/or my work. I don’t need them to tell me they don’t understand what I do, and for God’s sake, if I hear or see one more person ask me if I do anything else other than skeletons, I am going to punch them. You see, they just don’t get it!!! It’s like asking somebody who owns a Christmas shop if they carry anything for Halloween. I am celebrating Los Dias de los Muertos…I’m not painting for the hell of it. And besides, this country is going to be an Hispanic majority in less than 5 years and these folks have to get with the program. Talk about leaving out a huge market….and they call my work “…not a good marketing collection…”.

Wake up people!!!! There’s a whole new world out there. Get outside of your box and look at the big picture and see that there is another community out there just dying for something unique all their own. And I’m not even Hispanic. Well this white girl gets it!!!

Oy Vey! I just got back from my 30th High School Reunion in St. Louis. Yes, folks, I said 30. I look fantastic. It was everybody else that looked in their late 40’s…not me!!!

I went to St. Joseph’s Academy (for girls) in Frontenac, Missouri, a subdivision in St. Louis. A very wealthy one at that. And no, I was not the girl with daddy’s credit cards. But those girls were there. The look on their faces when I appeared from nowhere with purple hair and black hi-top tennis shoes with high heels nonetheless, was a picture that will last me a life time. As a matter of fact, one girl in particular didn’t know what to do when I began approaching her to give her a hug. Her smile immediately turned into a frown of shock trying to imagine my purple hair dye running on her perfectly quaffed face and hair. I can be a cheap bitch I will add, but my God, my hair dye is semi permanent so no worries.

The highlight of my trip was hooking up with my old pal Mary Holloran and catching up on old times. It was amazing what I have totally blacked out. Was it for lack of memory, or just wanting to wipe away some bad memories. This I have not been able to answer for quite sometime. Nonetheless, it was terrific. I had not heard nor seen anybody in 30 years so it was truly a walk back in time to see everybody. I would love to know what they all said after the reunion about “purple haired Schulte” (my maiden name).

Trying to explain to them what I did for a living was like discussing physics with a fly. It was the same look on the face of a fly and probably with the same question…”where’s the nearest pile of shit I can land on to get away from this weird human…”. But, it was a pleasant surprise to hear some of them say that they figured I would do something with my art since I was always into art in high school. I didn’t realize I worked on some of the art sets for plays. Now why do you think that would be a blackout?

Well, it’s great to be back into my real world and close that chapter of my life. It will be interesting if I hear from anybody since they all got a business card of mine. I doubt seriously they will look my web site up, but if they do, I’m hoping they will get a better understanding of the “purple haired Schulte”.

Martha Stewart, that is. Be looking for the new I.C. Ded Peeples dinnerware coming to a store near you soon. I’m in the process of developing square plates with some of my original canvas paintings on them. The first plate in the process of development is my sushi plate. And guess who is on it??? None other than “Won Bone Hung-Lo”. I’m so excited, prematurely nonetheless, that I had to blog everybody. Once the plate is developed I plan on doing a mass marketing compaign to every major department store or specialty store that’s willing to give this little artist a chance to be seen by the masses. Hell, I’ve even written to Emeril Lagasse hoping he’ll want these plates in his restaurants….”BAM”. I always think outside the box and I always think big. I can’t wait to be on the new Macy’s commercial showing my plate to Martha. Do you think she’ll like her painting? (Martha Blew-It Living..see her on my canvas painting site).

I’m actually writing today to wish everybody a Happy Christmas and great New Year. That’s right…no bitching..no complaints…absolutely nothing negative. Just good ‘ol holiday cheer for everybody. I’m actually taking a little break (started yesterday as a matter of fact) to enjoy the holiday season with my husband, Howard. I’m learning to take advantage of my “down time” while it lasts since my business is truly booming. Internet shopping has been the answer to my prayers. Well, actually I don’t pray to the internet, nor do I bring it up during my prayer time. So, that’s actually a weird statement, don’t ya think?

I just want to leave you this one question - since the color of snow is white, then why does it melt clear???? And while we’re on the subject of odd statements/questions, at what time during a fly’s flight, does it turn upside down to land on the ceiling??? Lastly, if we removed all the sponge rock from the ocean, would we get flooded?

How many of you are busy living your lives day to day? Working hard everyday, puting out fires, cleaning up messes left behind, multi-tasking, yet you find the time to return a phone call or a simple email. Are there any of you out there, truly? ‘Cause if you are, I’d like to hear from you since it’s becoming obvious to me that you are in the minority.

I don’t understand why some people find it nearly impossible to return a phone call or answer an email ’cause “…they’re too busy…”. Is it that difficult to just call or email with a message that states you’re busy at the moment, but you did receive the message and you will get back to the person shortly or when things are little less hectic? How does one run a business with that type of lacking? Or is this rude behavior now considered part of the “norm” of doing business and I’m the one out of touch expecting a little common courtesy?

It’s funny how these people say “they’re too busy” or whatever the excuse is (or lack of one) as if the one inquiring has nothing else to do but make an inquiry and wait til hell freezes over for a reply. I recently encountered this situation while working on an order when neither my emails or my phone calls were being returned. Yet, I’m sure if the shoe was on the other foot, there would be hell to pay. It just makes you feel as if you are not that important and that quite frankly, what you want doesn’t matter.

And I love their typical response (when they do finally respond - by accident, mind you) is “don’t take it personal…”. Hello?????? Okay, I won’t. How would you like me to take it? Obviously, you just want me to take it. Remind me of this when you call me needing some information. Don’t take it personally…

So, for all you folks out there that put off returning your phone calls or emails, straighten up will ya? Just let the person know you received their message and you’ll get back to them shortly. Remember…NO ONE IS THAT BUSY not to have a little common courtesy.

Well, after a few months the I.C. Ded Peeples main pages have a new look. My WebGod did a fantastic job, as usual. The purpose of this minor renovation was to create a more “product friendly” site. I feel we have succeeded.

I knew the minute I painted my first Bottled Peeples (Lady Grape-Iva) that I was destined for something other than arts & crafts fairs. After a lot of painstaking work, the operative word being ”PAIN“, my dream has become a reality. During the Albuquerque Wine Festival it became quite clear to me that I no longer wanted to do outdoor shows…well actually, any show involving a tent and lots of grass. For whatever reason, that show took any fire I had left inside regarding craft fairs. They are a lot of work to not only pack everything up at the studio/gallery, set-up at the event, but the amount of time spent creating the Dedware to sell at the event is extremely excruciating. I guess this sounds like my typical bitchin’, eh? Well, it is somewhat.

Anyway, that’s the event that made me throw in the towel. And I am so glad I did ’cause I was able to focus on the retail trade. Wow! Did my change in direction pay off. I have picked up a few more stores since that show (May 07) which have financially taken the place of what I would have been “raking in” and then some had I continued with the summer shows. I get mad at myself at times thinking I should be in more stores, but when I realize I just celebrated my 1 year anniversary in March 07, I have to stop, take a breath, and say “DAMN GIRL….YOU’VE DONE GOOD!!!”.

The only show (for now) that I am committed to is the annual Fiery Foods and BBQ Show in March. That’s the show that started it all and it has been very good to me. Plus, it’s kind of like a mini vacation for us. More importantly I get to sell direct to my adoring fans (except for the fat drunk guy who pissed me off in my earlier blog) as well as to retailers from all over the map. It’s a win-win situation.

I guess the point to this rambling is this. If you really dream something, it can come true with some hard work and most of all determination. Don’t let anyone tell you you can’t do something, or that your really reaching. Always say you “will” succeed and keep your dreams alive. I am a perfect example on how not to be a starving artist. You don’t have to go “with the flow” in order to succeed. Do your own thing.

Well, one day I hope to be on a mass production scale. That’s the other part of my dream. So if you or if you know of anyone who has the resources to mass produce some of my lines, please have them get in touch with me. I still dream of being a public company one day ringing that bell at the New York Stock Exchange. Having lunch with Martha is not part of it, but certainly swapping recipes with her I may consider. I’ll have her to my big house as opposed to joining her in the “big house” she’s been accustomed to living in.

Oh well, I really am rambling right now, but I’m tooting my own horn. The retail stores I’m established in now are doing wonderfully well with my Dedware and I can’t wait for the next chapter to begin. I’m waiting to hear from the company who owns all the retail stores at the Albuquerque, Phoenix, and Denver airports. I met with them last week and the buyer actually left our meeting for a moment just so she could bring the owner of the company in to meet me and look at my work. If that’s not a good sign, I don’t know what is. So, next time you’re waiting to catch a plane at one of these hubs, look for my Dedware. Well actually, don’t just look for it, buy something damn it!!! I still need to save up for my lunch with Martha.

So, thanks to all of you who have supported me during this road to success and I look forward to years of further endeavors in my Ded-world. Oy Vey! I sound as if I just won some sort of Pulitzer prize. I think my ego needs a rest as well as my painting elbow.

Wrote to a gift shop here in Albuquerque (won’t release the name just in case she changes her mind) to see if the hotel gift shop would be interested in carrying some Dedware. The buyer was very kind to respond quickly stating (and I’m paraphrasing) that she gets a lot of east coast tourists and they wouldn’t understand my jewelry. Wow! Didn’t realize I made jewelry. It must be good though if I did it. Anyway, that bugged me enough to respond to her. I basically told her that she must not have looked at my web site ’cause I didn’t make jewelry. That felt really good. To make this situation more interesting, she actually responded and said “…saw Jackalope and just figured it was jewelry…good-luck to you…”. Maybe it’s me, but Jackalope is not known for jewelry either. Do ya think she just didn’t take the time to browse any of my work? And what’s with the comment about the east coast tourists? They were a large consumer base at this years’ Fiery Foods & Barbeque Show right behind the Texans. Maybe her east coast tourists are unique and just don’t appreciate unique gift items. Or maybe they’ve not seen a Hispanic gift item before. You decide…

Like I always say, you don’t have to like my Dedware, but at least be honest enough to let me know. Don’t just make something up…tell me you’re not interested and move on.

Just got back from the annual Fiery Foods & Bar-B-Que show at the Sandia Casino Resort and it was fabulous. Highly recommend attending. Best sauces and chiles ever. You can get it all. For those of you with little people (also known as kids), you may want to think twice about bringing them. There is too many people and a lot of drinking going on. It’s also difficult navigating the strollers and when you’re not paying attention, the folks around you drinking tend to spill their drinks on them. Not good. Otherwise, the best time to come for you would be the Friday evening public show from 4 to 7. It’s not as crowded and is not as crazy.

This wouldn’t be Kim’s Bitchin’ Blog if there wasn’t a few bitches to share. So here goes…

When tasting the foods and sauces, which are fantastic, throw away your sample containers, spoons, beer bottles, and drink cups in a clearly marked trash can located throughout the convention area. Don’t be rude and lay them on vendors’ tables. I mean really! If I knew where some of you lived I would gladly return the favor on your front lawn. Think about it next time, okay? Just a little common courtesy doesn’t hurt anyone. With the exception of the next guy….

Sunday, the last day of the show, we had an abnoxious drunk fat f___king guy with a goatee style face quaff who will know who he is, and believe me, if I got his name it would be here…that really pissed me off. So did his friend. But, before I continue, don’t get offended that say “Fat” ’cause I’m not a fat-a-phobe (have my fat issues as well), I just wanted you to get the mental image.

His loud abnoxious fat drunk body proceeds in my booth only to reach over my display of wine bottles, knock over a few Butt Cups to grab my “Won Bone Hung-Lo” Bone Cover (apron) from my hanging display unit to show his friends. He loved it…that was nice and that’s where it stopped. He not only began to ask for a deal he got personal. My Bone Covers only run $15.00. I think that’s a great price considering they have original artwork (copyrighted I might add) that you can’t find anywhere but through me and some limited retail stores that would be double the price. Anyway, he wanted one for $10.00 and we said no. And we said no again and again. While he kept adding it’s the last day of the show and we should give him a break. Like my work ends when the show does. DUH!!! My husband piped in telling him I spend upwards of 12 hours a day on my artwork and he should just buy it and leave. But no, his abnoxious friend with the stupid hat on then pipes in “…2 for $25.00…” repeatedly! We just kept answering with the regular price. At the same time the fat f___k that was still holding the apron in his greesy beer infested butt crack smelling hand continued yelling at me to give him a break. I politely said “…I don’t want to be a starving artist all my life…” and without skipping a beat, he says to me “…you don’t look like you’re starving to me…”. That’s when I had to leave my booth. I can throw it around with the best of them, as you can tell from my site, but when you make it personal like that, that’s where it ends. I already have a very low self esteem about my body (which is why I say I do not have a fat-phobia and deeply empathize with the overweight folks out there) that comments like that really dig deep.

So much so that I spent the next couple of days tearing up at the thought of that guy. I so wish I would have told him to get out of my booth and take his fat ass and shove it…but I don’t think there is a tunnel large enough out in the world to house his fat ass! Believe you me…I will definitely defend myself next time.

My final comment on him…if you’re an ass when you drink, don’t come into my booth or any other vendors’ booths. These shows are hard work and cost a lot of money. We don’t deserve that kind of treatment…I run a business not a garage sale. If by chance your fat ass is reading this Mr. Rude guy, please stop by my booth next year so that I can call over about 20 security guys which is what it would take to haul your ass out of there and get you permanently removed from the show!

I was always under the impression that guys are the messy ones when it comes to bathroom ettiquette. After this weekends’ show, I was proven wrong. Ladies…c’mon! Just because you have to clean up at your own house, doesn’ give you the right to leave it up to the ladies who have to clean up after us in public. Don’t forget, they have to go home and clean up their own places too. Have a little cleanliness out there. Don’t you see the toilet paper left behind? It’s not only on the seat, it’s on the floors. Is your aim that bad???? How ’bout throwing away that wash towel after you dry your hands. The floor is already filled with crap left behind…literally!

Lastly, I have requested this before. If you’re going to eat, don’t touch. Please!!!!

Well, that’s if for this show. It was very successful for me this year and we signed up again for next year. We’ll be in the same aisle, but 2 spaces down on the corner. Come out and check it out! Unless you’re the fat drunk guy…stay home and insult your own friends and family!

Has anyone ever dealt with the Alibi? This is a local distribution in New Mexico. I simply don’t understand them. I have written them on several occasions. The first was when I wrote them regarding a home show I was puting on one weekend. I wanted to run an ad. Sounds simple right? Never heard back from them.

The second time I wrote to them about the local arts/crafts show at Jo’s Chameleon Cafe and I quote, “…call Jo to get the scoop…”. I figured I was doing the right thing allowing Jo to tell the Alibi what her ad was to say. Their smart ass response was “…we don’t callanybody for ’scoop’…” Oh gee. I’m sorry, I thought you were a news publication. I now know one thing…they are definitely not professional!

Then I wrote them twice after that. Once inquiring about prices to place an ad for my business and the other time to place a classified about a show I was puting on here at the house. Neither time did they have the professional courtesy to reply. Could it be because they make entirely too much money and just do not have the room for any more paid advertising????? I think not! I think they just have their heads up their liberal asses and simply do not care about the little guy. Okay, I feel better!

Regarding the Albuquerque Journal. I enjoy the Sunday crossword puzzle I admit. So, I do on occasion pick up this newspaper. Well, actually, my neighbor buys the paper every Sunday just so he can give me the crossword puzzle. Thank you Ernie. Anyway, twice I have contacted them to run a classified about a home show. Twice they directed me to The Mountain View Telegraph, which is their subsidiary for the East Mountain folks. No problem with The Mountain View Telegraph, they do run my ads and they do respond to my emails. But, I wanted to place the ads in the big paper as well. But, they didn’t want to ’cause they continued to direct me to East Mountain paper.

I guess if you don’t live in the big city, you don’t rate. It’s either that or these publications simply do not like the name of my business. I just don’t get it.

I do want to add one more thing regarding the ABQ Journal. Twice I have written them about writing an article about our 2006 Miss Rodeo New Mexico since she (Jesse Gearhart) had never been contacted. I thought it would be newsworthy. Afterall, Jesse represents our State and was heading off to Las Vegas, NV this month to try out for Miss Rodeo America. Twice they said the editor was not interested. Not an interesting story, they replied. Granted, if your not in the rodeo circuit it may not be interesting. But there are thousands of folks out here in New Mexico that enjoy horse-life. Do they not count or are they just considered not interesting. You decide.

Well, that’s my bitchin’ blog for the day. Just wanted to spread some newsworthy joy.