PUBLICIST: I really don’t understand it. People love hot legs. And you have such smokin’ gams.

KYLIE: I know, right? They’re almost as good as my ass. You’d think legs and an ass would be enough to sell more than 6,000 bloody albums in America. It worked for Jessica Simpson, and that bitch can’t even dance.

PUBLICIST: Or sing!

KYLIE: Or spell “sell.”

PUBLICIST: It can be a tough word.

KYLIE: Sigh…

PUBLICIST: Listen, let’s just focus on the album, and the tour. So I’m thinking… it’s called X. What can we do with that, conceptually, for the promo photo? Maybe we could do something in the vein of X-Men. You could wear an intense bodysuit and white wig and cape, and look like Storm! She’s hot!

KYLIE: Hmm. I’m not really sure I like that.

PUBLICIST: Or maybe you we could put you on one of those rotating wheels, spread out like an “X” while wearing a knife throwing assistant’s uniform! and there will be knives all around you and even one that you’re holding in your teeth. Amazing! That would be like visual sex.