ON SAN FRANCISCO Hot tickets: Getting admitted to exclusive shindigs all week leading up to game can be a very tall order

Updated 11:45 am, Sunday, February 3, 2013

Alana (right) and other Playmates arrive at Jax Brewery, which hosted Playboy magazine's annual Super Bowl party on Friday night in New Orleans.

Alana (right) and other Playmates arrive at Jax Brewery, which hosted Playboy magazine's annual Super Bowl party on Friday night in New Orleans.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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Former NFL player Jeremy Shocker poses with playmates Pilar and Nikki as he arrives at Jax Brewery who is hosting this year's Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Former NFL player Jeremy Shocker poses with playmates Pilar and Nikki as he arrives at Jax Brewery who is hosting this year's Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - Playboy Playmates Tiffany Toth, left and and Jessa Hinton stuff Crown Royal camo care packages for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal, Friday, Feb. 1, 2013, in New Orleans. The packages will be shipped as part of the Crown Royal Heros Project honoring American soldiers. (Photo by Jack Dempsey/Invision for Crown Royal/AP Images)

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - Playboy Playmates Tiffany Toth, left and and Jessa Hinton stuff Crown Royal camo care packages for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal,

Actor David Arquette poses with playmates Heather, Shelby and Nikki at Jax Brewery this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Actor David Arquette poses with playmates Heather, Shelby and Nikki at Jax Brewery this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Playboy Playmates attend The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images for Playboy)

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Playboy Playmates attend The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images for Playboy)

Photo: Jamie McCarthy, Getty Images For Playboy

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Actor David Arquette along with playmates Heather, Shelby and Nikki at Jax Brewery this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Actor David Arquette along with playmates Heather, Shelby and Nikki at Jax Brewery this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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Guests pose with playmates as they arrive at the Jax Brewery which is this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Guests pose with playmates as they arrive at the Jax Brewery which is this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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Young ladies waiting in the general admission line around the back of the club wait for the doors to open at Jax Brewery which is this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New Orleans, La.

Young ladies waiting in the general admission line around the back of the club wait for the doors to open at Jax Brewery which is this year's host of the Playboy Superbowl party on Friday Feb. 1, 2013 in New

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Snoop Dogg (C) poses with Playmates Tabasco Original Red Sauce at the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Craig Barritt/Getty Images for Tabasco)

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Snoop Dogg (C) poses with Playmates Tabasco Original Red Sauce at the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Craig

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - Actor Neil Patrick Harris stuffs a Crown Royal camo care package for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal, Friday, Feb. 1, 2013, in New Orleans. The packages will be shipped as part of the Crown Royal Heros Project honoring American soldiers. (Photo by Jack Dempsey/Invision for Crown Royal/AP Images)

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - Actor Neil Patrick Harris stuffs a Crown Royal camo care package for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal, Friday, Feb. 1, 2013, in New

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - New Orleans Saints head coach Sean Payton stuffs a Crown Royal camo care package for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal, Friday, Feb. 1, 2013, in New Orleans. The packages will be shipped as part of the Crown Royal Heros Project honoring American soldiers. (Photo by Jack Dempsey/Invision for Crown Royal/AP Images)

IMAGE DISTRIBUTED FOR CROWN ROYAL - New Orleans Saints head coach Sean Payton stuffs a Crown Royal camo care package for U.S. troops overseas during the Playboy Party presented by Crown Royal, Friday, Feb. 1,

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Snoop Dogg (R) poses with Playmate Kylie Johnson at The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for Playboy)

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Snoop Dogg (R) poses with Playmate Kylie Johnson at The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: NASCAR racer Kyle Busch (2nd R) and Samantha Busch (2nd L) attend The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Andrew H.

NEW ORLEANS, LA - FEBRUARY 01: Andrew Roden (L) and John Lumpkin (R) pose with Playmates at The Playboy Party Presented by Crown Royal on February 1, 2013 in New Orleans, Louisiana. (Photo by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for Playboy)

On Decatur Street in New Orleans, Robert Chewning of Ukiah came prepared with a parasol in 49ers red and gold.

On Decatur Street in New Orleans, Robert Chewning of Ukiah came prepared with a parasol in 49ers red and gold.

Photo: Carlos Avila Gonzalez, The Chronicle

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Montoya of the Niner Noise drum line is happy to see a crowd of 49ers fans on Decatur Street in New Orleans.

Montoya of the Niner Noise drum line is happy to see a crowd of 49ers fans on Decatur Street in New Orleans.

Photo: Carlos Avila Gonzalez, The Chronicle

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Members of the Niner Noise perform for fans on Decatur Street in New Orleans on Saturday. 49ers fans poured out on the streets in New Orleans, La., on Saturday, February 2, 2013, the day before the 49ers played in Super Bowl XLVII

Members of the Niner Noise perform for fans on Decatur Street in New Orleans on Saturday. 49ers fans poured out on the streets in New Orleans, La., on Saturday, February 2, 2013, the day before the 49ers played

A bag of beads is tossed from a Mardi Gras float as it moves down Canal St. near the French Quarter of New Orleans, La. on Saturday Jan. 26, 2013.

A bag of beads is tossed from a Mardi Gras float as it moves down Canal St. near the French Quarter of New Orleans, La. on Saturday Jan. 26, 2013.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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San Francisco residents Sailesh Patel (left) and Amit Motawala are decked out in 49er gear Friday at the Riverwalk, on the shore of the Mississippi River.

San Francisco residents Sailesh Patel (left) and Amit Motawala are decked out in 49er gear Friday at the Riverwalk, on the shore of the Mississippi River.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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A Mardi Gras float rolls down Canal Street in New Orleans, near the French Quarter, as onlookers wait for strings of beads to be tossed.

A Mardi Gras float rolls down Canal Street in New Orleans, near the French Quarter, as onlookers wait for strings of beads to be tossed.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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Brendon and Teresa Woods from Utah and Manuel Valentin, from Pinole stop for photos against a hugh image of 49er Colin Kaepernick in the Riverwalk area of New Orleans, La. on Saturday Feb. 3, 2013.

Brendon and Teresa Woods from Utah and Manuel Valentin, from Pinole stop for photos against a hugh image of 49er Colin Kaepernick in the Riverwalk area of New Orleans, La. on Saturday Feb. 3, 2013.

Photo: Michael Macor, The Chronicle

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A background band with 49er fans in it helped lead singer Patrick Monahan with a tune. In what was one of the biggest concerts of the Super Bowl week, Train performed for hundreds of fans just across the street from the New Orleans Convention Center Friday February 1, 2013.

A background band with 49er fans in it helped lead singer Patrick Monahan with a tune. In what was one of the biggest concerts of the Super Bowl week, Train performed for hundreds of fans just across the street

Looking back, I'd say the Playboy party was the one I remember best from Super Bowl week. But not for the reasons you're probably thinking.

It was because I have never been in a room where so many women were so much taller than me. They were impossibly curvaceous ladies in short, tight skirts and high, tippy-toe heels. Several were well over 6 feet tall. It was as if Victoria's Secret had fielded a basketball team.

My assignment during the week was to get into as many invitation-only parties as possible. As much as the 49ers and Ravens like to think this week is about them, Super Bowl week is really about all of the parties. My editor kept saying that it would be amusing to describe the ones that turned me down.

And it would have been except that I had remarkably good luck. I was shut out on Wednesday night, but since I went to two on Friday night, I'd say I was five-for-five. I didn't get into the shindig thrown by Saints owner Tom Benson, but that was for NFL owners and their staff. Limit of 10. Can't really complain about that.

Once invited, however, there was always some drama at the door. There were guys with earpieces and radios, and you were never at the right entrance or on the right guest list. It was always necessary to find Sean or Christine or Jerrod, whoever was in charge. Eventually, he or she would show up and hand over the coveted colored wristband.

After making it through those checkpoints, then you got to see (at least at the major parties - Bud Light and Playboy) red carpet entrances. Photographers and TV cameras would line up and celebrities would walk the length, looking lovely and bantering with reporters. Usually a party assistant would walk briskly through first holding up a piece of paper that said, "Troy Aikman," or whomever was next.

Like high school prom

But sometimes you missed the billing.

"Who is this?" I asked a photographer.

"Laura something," he said, continuing to shoot photos.

The odd part was, after wrangling an invite, clearing security and entering the inner sanctum, the parties were mostly just big rooms with thousands of people. It felt like high school prom. You hear about it for weeks and when you finally arrive, it's just the gym with some crepe paper.

Granted, there were some remarkable showcases. Bud Light Vice President Mike Sundet took me on a tour of what had been the Wyndham Hotel until Super Bowl week. The beer company took over the entire 200-room facility, re-named it the Bud Light Hotel, erected a 3,500-person tent, built a pedestrian walkway over the street and lit the exterior walls with Bud blue lights.

Inside the rooms, which were filled with Bud Light retailers and guests, the bath towels, the soap and even the shampoo were blue.

The hotel actually hosted four consecutive party nights for roughly 5,000 guests a night. I was there for EA Sports, promoting the Madden NFL 13 video game. Inside the tent it was announced that before the concert featuring Lil Wayne, there would be a video game competition featuring football players like Saints quarterback Drew Brees and soon-to-graduate University of Michigan quarterback Denard Robinson.

Seriously? We were going to watch them play video games? But EA knew its audience. The crowd seemed riveted. Lil Wayne, however, wasn't scheduled until 1 a.m. I missed him.

The other constant of Super Bowl week is that something always pops up at the last minute. I heard about the modestly named "Best Super Bowl Concert Ever," featuring San Francisco band Train, an hour before it happened. Surely I'd be turned down for that one. But no, a VH1 rep told me to come on over, and hurry because it was all going to be televised.

Train, clearly seasoned pros, did San Francisco proud, but I couldn't stay for the encore because the Playboy party started at 11 p.m. (How the younger me would have reacted to an 11 p.m. Playboy party: "OMG. Playboy bunnies." The current reaction: "OMG. I have to take a nap.")

Going against the flow

That party was in a pub in a converted brewery in the French Quarter. It was a nice layout, but as the evening went on it became too crowded. I worked my way against the flow and made it to the chilly fresh air.

Outside was one of the tall model-types. She was wearing a short, clinging skirt, 6-inch heels and no jacket. She was talking into her cell phone.

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