Town Square

Weaving an emotional-health 'safety net' for young persons is not a new concept

Original post made
on Jun 5, 2010

The issues of adolescent stress and kids in deep personal trouble are not a new phenomena in Palo Alto, even though there is a real-time urgency to the current wave of concern sweeping through the community.

Posted by AnoNymous
a resident of another community
on Jun 5, 2010 at 12:29 pm

At least someone is focused on bringing additional industries to Palo Alto. Just as the "Diversity Industry" shows some signs of peaking a bit (though far too many are financially invested in "racism" to ever allow it to disappear), along comes well-known liberal toadie Jay Thorwaldson to prop up the "woe is our kids" industry. Perhaps Mr. T. is hoping to evolve into another Denise Clark Pope, who has managed to build an entire career mouthing platititudes on this topic.

Indeed, one cannot help but notice how the Palo Alto environment has evolved into one that is totally uncaring, not to mention destititute. No one cares about kids, they never have decent clothing or enough food, fist fights are constantly breaking out in the halls, etc.

Here are some ideas for the kids who are overwhelmed with workloads: No Twitter, Facebook, hanging out at malls, credit cards with no limits, world traveling, vacation homes or $80,000 cars in which to race around all weekend.

Then maybe they will have a little more time for school-related activities, and will no doubt suffer less stress as a consequence.

And stop providing the even most vague of suggestions that suicide might not be a completely unexpected outcome to this hideous environment; you liberal toadie.

Posted by Mark Weiss
a resident of Downtown North
on Jun 5, 2010 at 6:29 pm

I definitely think kids today have it harder than in my day, a generation back. But it is also true that we had young suicide even then. Our Gunn valedictorian killed himself during his sophomore year at Harvard, at age 20. He was a brilliant guy, a sweet guy, but obviously, mostly unbeknownst to us, troubled. The woman he went to Spring Formal with senior year (as friends, a group of us ate at Flea Street Cafe beforehand) later said that she felt he was never completely happy. I remember that it took the Times Tribune three tries to tell his story in a way that was fair to his family and friends (The first time was spot news. The second time focused on the fairly bizarre circumstances of his death, as reported by his East Coast friends and acquaintances; the third story was the only one that quoted his family directly. I called Ruthann Richter, who had once been my family's house sitter, and appealed to her to redo the story). I remember John most for giving a symposium on nuclear war, for turning down a scholarship opportunity based on a personal question they asked during his interview, and for making a ribald joke in physics class about torque. Actually all he said was "Distance times angle?" but he gave a knowing look of a a much hipper dude, and included me by association. About ten of us had a rowdy Super Bowl party at his Dad's house in South Palo Alto the year the Niners beat the Bengals and even now, years later, certain friends share an inside joke about instant replay.

I wonder whether there is a connection between a society in which our federal government spends billions of dollars on military campaigns and a community wherein a kid in his weakest moments thinks self-violence is rational, and then acts. That's a perhaps simplistic statement or a scapegoat but why are we so violent as a nation?

I appreciate Mr. Thorwaldson and the Palo Alto Weekly trying to find words that will help in this situation, in these times.

I wish I would have known this before I got into this town. I like everyone else came here because I heard the schools were great. Now I know they are great, but there is a big cost to it. The mental and emotional health of our kids. I am glad this year my kids are leaving Gunn for good, but I know the experiences they had when they were there will haunted for the rest of their lives. At least they are still alive. Hopefully they will recover and be healthy and happy again. At this point I do not care anymore about their academics. Thanks God I learned that is better to have them alive than dead or in jail with a a 4+ grade point average. I which other moms could do this. Kids are not dying at the tracks, but right now they are still trying to die by taking pills. Some have been found on time and been saved. This is awful. It is an epidemic.

Living here is very hard work. We must work very hard every day to make this into a place where all kids feel valued and welcome without regard to their study habits and/or academic ability. It is odd to have paid so much money to be in this place where we have to work so hard, but such is life. This isn't easy, but we can do it.

Posted by good grief
a resident of Greenmeadow
on Jun 9, 2010 at 12:00 pm

Good grief, Mark. Tis a far stretch to try to connect suicides to our spending "billions" on the military.

As a percent of our total fed budget, our military spending has continued to decrease since WW2. Yet, since the 60s, our suicide rate continues to climb..why is that? Lots of changes since then..cable TV being one, Moms working outside the home being anothe. . Along the same kind of thoughtfulness you exhibited, I suspect cable TV and working moms could be blamed.

But, go ahead..blame that vast military complex for all the evils of our nation, including local kids committing suicide. I am sure that is helpful to the grieving families and friends, and helpful in preventing more troubled youth from taking that permanent solution to temporary problems.

Posted by Mark
a resident of South of Midtown
on Jun 10, 2010 at 11:16 am

Truth be told, I was writing that post for myself more than ostensibly trying to help the families and friends afffected by our more recent tragedies. It's my way of processing, even 25 years later, what became of my friend John. But it is true in his case that he was worried about nuclear war -- he organized a teach-in about it, during the Gunn lunch hour.

I don't know if it is helpful or not to put the recent events in a historical context; if I have spoken recently about what happened to my friend and classmate, I have hoped the information helps.

Again, I appreciate Mr. Thorwaldson writing about this topic, about the programs we do have in place here, and the people putting so much of their hearts into trying to help. If I wrote that kids have it harder now, it is also true that there are probably more people working on these issues and we have more knowledge about these issues.

Posted by Jennifer Grove
a resident of another community
on May 8, 2012 at 11:20 am

My Mother and I went to Ann Gagnon when I was small and having trouble in school. I remember that she asked my Mother some pointed questions and that we never went back to see her. This was the one and only time someone "outside" seemed to understand that I was not okay and suspect that the source of the problem was my relationship with my Mother. I never had another chance after that.

!!!!!

I am almost 50 years old and completely disabled and unemployable. If only...