Adult Swinging/Curious Husband

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Expert: Guycurious - 3/13/2014

QuestionQUESTION: I'm a bit thrown off & offended that my husband has brought this up, I'm old fashioned maybe but I caught him sign up on a swingers website as a Single male, need some advice please :/

ANSWER: That's a rough way to learn about your husband's sexual desires. Have you tried talking to him about this? He needs to know he has violated the trust in your marriage. Ask him if he has done this in the past.

Participation in the lifestyle only works if both people are interested. Going along just because the other person wants to try it will not work. A relationship has to be strong with open, honest communication.

It's time to sit your husband down for a heart to heart.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: We spoke
He's never done it before but is curious & wanted to try it
I'm honestly not comfortable seeing him with another woman
It would be traumatizing

AnswerSounds to me like the decision has been made. You need to tell him your position on this subject and let him know you just are not interested in participating in the lifestyle.

He will need to decide what is more important, swinging or his marriage. I know this may come across as crass but there is no way to sugarcoat this problem.

I wish you the best and please write back and let me know how you're doing.

Guycurious

Expertise

We can answer the following type of questions:
1. My wife and I are contemplating swinging.
2. My spouse is interested but I'm not.
3. Friends of ours are swingers and have asked us to try it but we're not sure.

Experience

My wife and I have been involved in the lifestyle for about four years now. We've had many experiences with other couples.