Dating Non-Booklovers

They say opposites attract, but do they really?

The blogosphere has blown up with posts about dating non-readers and they're just everywhere! Even Barnes & Noble and BookRiot have their own posts about the subject. I couldn't escape the spread and decided instead of ignoring it, just to grab on and write my own post. I don't know about you, but I love these types of posts where I'm able to share personal experiences and opinions. So as a disclaimer, everything said in this post is my opinion and you don't have to agree with it.

When it comes to books there are 50% of those who love to read and 50% who just don't. It's a simple known fact that not everyone loves to read as much as booklovers do. And you can't help if your heart falls for a non-booklover or a booklover. This post is for both non-booklovers and booklovers alike. I hope you guys like it and find it very debatable!

What do I think?

For booklovers, I think it really depends on the person. If you're dating a non-reader and that person is not supportive of what you love to do, ehhhhhh. Will he/she accept that you'll be a few minutes late to dinner because you were too caught up in a book? Will he/she accept that you don't see their texts because the main character of your book just died and you're too in shock to speak? These are the kinds of things I mean when I say acceptance.

I'm so blessed to be with someone who is not a booklover but understands what I do and tries to encourage it. He even recommends books to me and he's the first person that got me hooked on Brandon Sanderson. If it wasn't for him, I would have never read Steelheart and I would have never declared Sanderson as my favorite fantasy author ever!

Nonreaders bring so many new things to a relationship. While you're reading, they're probably cleaning your room or getting you something to drink. They can also teach you about the things they love to do and help you with some things that you're not strong in (because your reading game is already too strong :3).

Some perks I've picked up

They think you're smart because you read (totally awesome!)

They can't argue with you when you're talking about a book you really hate or really love

Buying you more books, rather than buying books for himself/herself

Force you to get out more (which is good because although you love reading, you still need a social life)

They don't ask to borrow books because they don't like to read

You can fangirl about books to them with spoilers and all because they've never read the book but you need someone to let the steam and feels off

They'll probably even become interested in learning more about literature

For non-booklovers, of course, you should totally date a reader! If you're reading this post and you're not a big reader, I'm going to try to convince you to date a booklover! First off all, we're like totally filled with knowledge because of all the books and info that have been stuffed in our brain. I think I've learned more things about knives and assassin's blades than I ever will on the internet just from reading books like Throne of Glass. Not that I'll ever need any knowledge of knives... well... maybe sometime in the future when I'm a ninja :)

Why you should date a reader?

We'll be able to teach you things :D

We're good listeners

Easy to buy gifts for, don't forget that

We stay up late, ohh yes (not just for reading, but for you)

Don't be afraid to leave us alone. We're not going to be lonely with a book in hand

We made good conversation

Wide range of vocal that we can teach you

We know a lot about romance since mostly ALL books these days have a smidgen of romance

We commit, not only to book series but to relationships

And, of course, I couldn't leave out the last group.

Booklovers & Booklovers

Awww. It's a match made in heaven and you're probably going to have so much fun staying up late together reading or sitting against a tall tree and reading together underneath it. When you both have read a series, you'll take hours, maybe even days, talking about everything that went down and the characters that you love. You'll probably understand each other so well and let each other borrow their books. You're going to tag each other in cool bookish posts on Facebook and tweet book inspired pictures that make you two laugh. Aww it's so cute!

However, it's not all sunshine and rainbows on the other side. On the down side, you guys might be so immersed in books that when one of you hates a book that the other loves, be prepared for some gunships and cannons because THIS MEANS WAR! I mean... you'll disagree hehe. I don't like to get violent on you but it's the truth. Something as simple as a disagreement on your favorite book series can shatter a relationship. So keep an eye out fellow booklovers!

What are your thoughts? Would you date a non-reader? What about a reader?

24 comments

I'm not really dating any guy, but I have a guy friend who knows I love to read books and that I can't stand Internet language (e.g. "i luv 2 read" < UGH CAN'T STAND THAT). So whenever he chats with me online, he always has to fix his grammar just I won't get irritated by him :P I think dating a non-booklover can be a little tough because -- 1) no one to relate to, 2) sometimes us bookworms can get pretty annoying with our love for books. But I'd still date a non-booklover IF ONLY he can tolerate my obsession :)

I love the stuff you listed down! Especially the fact that it's easy for non-booklovers to buy us gifts because anyone can take a quick scan at my TBR and easily guess which of the books I'd love to have. Great post!

And let's admit it gurll.. we want those kinds of gifts. As much as we don't want to stand stuck up when people ask us 'what do you want for christmas', we want books!!! I'll casually slide my TBR in their email or underneath the newspaper in the morning haha!

AHHHHHHHH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! I totally agree with the fact that we're easy to buy gifts for. Literally any time someone asks me what I want (as a gift), I'm just like "here's my five million page list of books I want, choose one and that would make me the happiest person ever" or they can just give me a Barnes and Noble gift card or something. It's not too hard. Even if they give me a book I've never heard of, I usually appreciate the sentiment. They have acknowledged that I love books, and that's what counts :)

Of course I'd love to date a booklover. (Side note: in case you were wondering, for some reason booklover keeps autocorrecting to baklava and I'm not sure why. Does anyone else have this problem????) They'd have so many great book recommendations I like having someone who's a good listener and someone who just understands the book obsession. Even if they tolerate it, I feel like non-booklovers would start to get annoyed with me :P

OMGG You just made me fall of my chair laughing like a maniac. Thank god someone else noticed that booklover kept autocorrecting into baklava!!!! I thought I was the only one. I'm laughing like a donkey now it's too funny! And yes wonderful points made out. Gosh you're awesome *flips hair*

I am one of those rare cases who dated a booklover and ....... didn't have a good time with it!Sounds surprising, I know, and he was everything you can ask from a picture perfect nerdy guy! He was cute, wore nerdy glasses, and these cool tshirts with quotes, and we could actually debate about our views on books! We dated for two years, and it was so cool, but it also had a lot of drawbacks.First of all, we were interested in different genres. I am not a sci fi fan - at all - but he adored that genre! Star Wars, Maze Runner - those were his favs. He was a fan of high fantasy, had an obsession with Game of Thrones, Brandon Sanderson, while I was more of a contemporary and urban fantasy fan. Our favourite genres clashed a lot, and I actually had to defend my favourite genres when we get into debates.Then there's also the fact that sometimes everything we talk about is books. I mean, it's nice, but that's not what a relationship is about, you get what I mean?

Oh I'm sorry about that. Thanks so much for sharing though! I love when I get to hear your guys' experiences. And, of course, I totally understand and I was trying to hint that in this post where a relationship, if one with a baklava, shouldn't bring you together just because your love for books. Thanks Mishma <3

For a NBSB like me, I really dream to be in a relationship with a guy that is a book lover. That would be fabulous and exciting. We could talk about books and we'll never ran out of books to talk about because BOOKS. ARE. FOREVER. Lol.

I agree with you with the gifts are easy thing. You could give me a pocketbook and I'll be already dancing in the air happy. It rarely happens to me that's why moments like that feel so so so important :D

Dating a nonbooklover is also fab fab fab. He's the shoulder you could cry on when people in the books die, or you could just squish him and totally be cuddly when the book is too cute and fluffy and swoon-y :p or you can be extremely imaginative with him and ask about his opinion about castles, kingdoms, dragons HAHAHA and all of those he wouldn't mind because though he doesn't like reading much, he understands how you feel and he lets you do what you love. Ahhh, dreamy guys <3

Lmfao I'm so glad this book made you think about dreamy guys and castles and dragons haha! It's so nice to see what all of you think when I write about these sorts of things! Well with experience dating a nonbooklover, I think your description is on point for my case.

Wonderful post!!! I have a post about dating a non-booklover in my drafts but have never posted it. It's something I will do eventually. I have been with my boyfriend since we were 15, so it will be 9 years together this year, and in that time he has read 0 books. He is not a reader at all. But he gets that I am and is so supportive. He buys me books. He lets me rant and rave about books to him and get all my bookish frustrations out. He brings me snacks when I'm reading. Is supportive of all the time I spend blogging/reading. He's the best!!! Although I bet it's just as lovely to date someone who can talk to you about books and read them with you.

I'm definitely attracted to people who have similar interests. I mean yeah, 'cause they like what I like. BUT, I'm also attracted to the idea of dating someone who is different in their own way. But, I mean I would love to date someone who either loves to read as well, or loves that I do--and supports that, by buying me mucho books! :P

Totally true. In the eyes of different people, they would prefer being with someone who shares their hobbies and others just don't. It really just depends on the kind of person we are and that's why this is such a huge debate. Hahah honestly they don't have to like what I do or anything, as long as I get books as gifts, am I right lmfao?

Really interesting post! My boyfriend also loves reading but alas we don't read the same things most of the time. Quite recently we both tried reading the same book and we had a brief discussion about it but nothing more than that. It's great when we go on holiday though because we can both read in peace and neither one of us bothers the other :) I love how you mentioned that non-readers are probably cleaning your room or getting you something to drink as you read xD I wish!!!

OMG that is so cute. *flails* The silence of reading doesn't make anything awkward? I feel like it's always awkward when I'm sitting next to my boyfriend and reading and he's doing homework. I get so awkward sometimes, but that's just me lmfao!

I really agree that ACCEPTANCE is what you should look for. I've actually never dated, but even in my non-romantic relationships, all I need is acceptance. I have several friends who hate reading, but accept the fact that I'm a booknerd. Sure, they tease me about it a LOT, but it's just in fun, and they don't look down on me or dislike me just because I read so much. I also have plenty of friends who are fellow booknerds, and I have an AMAZING time discussing books and fangirling and generally acting like lunatics whenever our subject of conversation is books!I think that's it's pretty awesome to have a relationship with someone who really understands you when it comes to what you adore, but when you have mixed interests, it also keeps that relationship interesting. I'd totally date someone who was a non-reader if they treated my passions with respect!Also, on a side note. I recently bought Steelheart (today, in fact!), and now that you have assured me of its awesomeness, it's definitely next up on my TBR :D

YESSS. Omg I was so surprised when my boyfriend first gave me Steelheart and was kind of suspicious of reading it because he's like a nonbooklover so the fact that he's recommending me a book is like so weird... BUT THEN I READ IT TO BE NICE... Holy cow I need to take recommendations from him more often. Can't wait to hear your thoughts on it! I also hope that you find someone who appreciates what you do as a booklover and likes books too <3

Haha this post is awesome! It's so true too xD They can't argue with you because they haven't read the book. And you don't have to awkwardly jeopardize your relationship by possibly letting or not letting him borrow your books. And bonus points for them thinking you're extra smart because you're a bibliophile ;)

Hello love. I know you're probably super busy, but if you ever find a place to slide it in, I've nominated you for The Sisterhood of The World Bloggers Award. If not, don't worry!Cheers! XO// Sarah http://enchantedbyabook.blogspot.com/2015/08/the-sisterhood-of-world-bloggers-award.html

Alexandria

Yingchao "Ying"

Gabrielle "Gabby"

Blog Archive

Follow by Email

Become a Bee

Spread the honey...

Featured On...

FTC Disclaimer

Any books that are reviewed on this site are either gifted to me, won in a giveaway, or purchased. All reviews are honest, and are not swayed by anything. I will note if the books have been gifted or won. Most pictures or clip art have been taken off of Google or somewhere else if said otherwise. Said pictures are not mine, and I do not hold ownership over them unless stated otherwise.