As I was cleaning out some old files on my computer recently, I stumbled upon a file called Story Impressions. I had no idea what it was until I opened it, then all of the memories came flooding back. And I laughed. And then I thought, these are too good to not share somehow, which leads us to this moment right now.

These came from a meeting I was in back in 2012. We were being shown how to use Story Impressions in a classroom setting. It is an exercise in creative writing. What you do is give the students five different words and they must then write a paragraph that uses them all. The words we were given were: Fourth, Isthmus, Kenny Rogers, Up with People and Boys (and they had to be used in order). Here are the creations I came up with that day. Hopefully you enjoy them as much as I did.​

I had just finished a fourth of Jack Daniels straight from the bottle when I vomited. “It looks like an isthmus,” Kenny Rogers shouted at me as he patted me on back. “You hold your liquor like those pansies from Up with People,” he chided me as I continued to ralph all over his boys shoes.

I was eating my fourth helping of chicken at Isthmus Park from Kenny Rogers Roasters when I decided I couldn’t put up with people anymore. I didn’t want to leave my boys behind, but I had decided to kill myself with fried chicken.

During the fourth of July, my family always traveled to the isthmus where dad asked mom to divorce him after seeing Kenny Rogers perform with Up With People. Dad’s reason for the divorce request, he preferred the company of boys.

My fourth toe on my right foot never developed quite properly. It looks like a malformed isthmus. Some country star like Kenny Rogers could write a country song about it, but it might be better suited for a sh**ty ass group like Up with People. I am quite certain it is why the boys ask me to keep my socks on during sex.

After his fourth whiskey sour over at the Isthmus, he sauntered over to the jukebox and put on back to back jams from Kenny Rogers and Up with People. The boys at the bar didn’t take kindly to his tunes