Nonviolent Intervention in Interpersonal Conflict
On Saturday, 11 February 1995, I attended a workshop in Melbourne conducted
by Michael S. Biernbaum, a visiting North American peace activist and
community organiser. This workshop taught one aspect of nonviolence that I
had not previously had the opportunity to explore in depth. Michael taught
participants how to respond to situations of interpersonal conflict that
threatened violence or were already violent in ways that do not increase the
overall level of violence. It was a very valuable workshop.
Michael is from Madison, Wisconsin in the United States. A biochemist with a
Ph.D. from Stanford University, he has spent many years teaching protective
behaviours and working with men's groups to reduce rape and other forms of
violence. His workshop contained much evidence of his commitment,
thoughtfulness and experience in developing answers to the question of how to
stop violence without violence in the interpersonal context. Although I
learned some very important things during the workshop, I felt strongly that
the workshop structure and process did not do justice to its content. For
example, Michael spoke throughout the morning session except for a few
questions and the break. It was a long morning!
This report of Michael's valuable work is based on the six hour workshop I
attended and his unpublished article 'Stopping Violence Without Violence', to
be published in the April 1995 issue of Conscious Living magazine.
Nonviolent intervention
Nonviolent interventions are taught to enhance personal safety in the home,
school, workplace and neighbourhood; and to offer creative responses to
bullying, sexual harassment, hate crime and other forms of personal and
community violence. The basic idea is that a person, staying within their own
boundaries for safety and risk, can act to make a conflict situation visible
and prevent or halt the violence that is otherwise 'supposed' to happen.
Nonviolent intervention is based on the principle that 'We all have the right
to feel safe all the time'. Given that many people feel isolated,
disempowered and/or emotionally 'shutdown', the first step in the program is
to help people recover their sense of feeling safe. This is not necessarily
easy. However, as we identify and then rid ourselves of old patterns of
'shutdown' behaviours, as well as 'victim' thinking and language, we can
learn and internalise prevention and protection strategies that we can use to
protect us from harassment and assault in our daily lives.
Taking risks on purpose
Why do we hear of assaults and crimes occurring in full view of others
without anyone getting involved? Michael identified many factors - including
'baggage' (personal history, fears, expectations and stereotypes) from past
experience - that override people's 'early body alert signal' and distort
their decisions about whether or not to get involved. He poses the vital
question: 'For whom am I acting?' The answer: as much for myself as for the
other person(s).
He also emphasised the importance of being part of a Network of people that
offers us support in our efforts to stop the violence. This will relieve the
sense of isolation and the fear that often comes from believing that we are
acting alone and might be 'singled out' and attacked.
Body alert signals
Michael emphasised that in order to confront violence, we need a secure place
from which to act. He believes that our personal 'body alert signal' (or
early warning sign) provides this solid anchor. This signal is an internal
physical sensation (perhaps 'a feeling in the gut' or 'a tingling of the
skin') that varies from one person to another but which alerts us to danger;
it can also help us discriminate between what is unsafe for us and what is an
invitation to adventure and change, both of which can set off our early
warning system. By getting in touch with our personal body alert signal and
our intuition, we can build a body-centred awareness that we can trust and
use to protect ourselves and others.
In order to intervene effectively, each of us 'sorts out' how unsafe (or not)
we are feeling and then chooses the most appropriate course of action for us.
Guidelines for action
In order to guide action, Michael nominates several principles.
1. I feel the violence. The definition of violence is not external, it is
based on our own body feelings.
2. What right do I have to intervene? By intervening to prevent or halt
violence, I am acting to defend my own right to feel safe all of the time.
The act of intervention is for me as much as it is for anyone else.
3. I am committing to take one step. Any further action depends on my
assessment of the risk and what I want to do based on my own feelings and
intervention skills.
4. Nonviolent interventions are adventures in safety. The creativity of
nonviolent intervention allows disruption of what is supposed to occur. Many
outcomes are possible.
5. Nonviolent interventions are immediate. The response to violence is here
and now, and in that sense, complements approaches (such as mediation) that
might be appropriate later.
6. Participation is voluntary. Nonviolent intervention is based on choice;
there is nothing we 'must' or 'should' do.
7. 'The interventions are non-heroic'. They are ordinary actions by ordinary
people.
8. Nonviolent interventions are nonviolent. The overall level of violence or
victimisation is not increased.
Nonviolent intervention: How?
Using roleplays, Michael encouraged us to explore the infinite variety of
nonviolent interventions that were available to us to prevent, interrupt or
stop harassment and assaults. These powerful, non-heroic interventions allow
us to help ourselves or others to 'make a scene' without increasing the
overall level of violence or victimisation.
In order to highlight the incredible variety of possible responses, Michael
drew a line on the white board and put the label 'zero' at the left end and
'hero' at the right end. He used this line and these labels to highlight the
fact that most people believe there are essentially two options: do nothing
(which reflects a state of powerlessness or denial) or 'be heroic'. In fact,
two hours later we had run out of room filling the line with suggested
non-heroic options for intervention and it was clear that we could have gone
on indefinitely. So what did we 'invent' or he suggest? I have described the
major categories of nonviolent interventions available to us (explained in
Michael's article) and arranged them loosely along the continuum that evolved
in the workshop: from small steps, that might entail less risk, to those
involving higher levels of interaction, and possibly higher risk, although
the risk factor associated with a form of intervention depends on the
context.
Noticing: Seeing what is happening, feeling the danger and bringing the
violence to the centre of your attention.
Interrupting: Stopping what you are doing and letting yourself be seen to
turn your attention to the violence.
Getting help: Summoning assistance - nearby people, the police. Sounding the
alarm.
Turning or moving toward: Turning or moving (a little, a lot) in the
direction of the violence. This, in fact, might feel safer than moving away.
Observing: Watching (and being seen to watch) in order to figure out what is
happening. Talking about it with those you are with or those passing.
Witnessing: Taking detailed mental or written notes. Who is saying what? Who
is doing what? Where are they? What are they wearing? Recording the sequence
of events. This can be useful as evidence if the victimised person decides to
use it later.
Asking into: Questions (rather than commands that imply a threat) are
powerful tools for engaging violent people. 'What are you doing?' 'Do you
know what you are doing?' Or to the person being victimised: 'Do you need
help?' 'Does that hurt?' The questions help us to find out what is going on
and to discover if our help is needed or wanted. In some contexts, a command
is appropriate. 'Stop hitting that child' can be said without threat. But in
most cases of the type discussed here, questions that are 'open-handed' tend
to reduce the risk. Another way of 'asking into' a situation is saying what
you feel, want or see.
Distracting: Being theatrical: creating an alternative 'scene'. Using humour.
Intentionally translating (or mistranslating to take the insult out of) what
is said. Making noises, shouting, singing, whistling, waving or moving the
body wildly might enable someone to get away.
Acting crazy: Asking an irrelevant question: 'Do you have a cigarette?'
'Where is the bus stop?' Doing something unexpected or bizarre; perhaps
acting crazy (babbling incoherently, making nonsense noises, flailing on the
ground) to draw attention and to make people (including the violent person)
feel inclined to move away.
Mirroring: Imitating what you see happening. This might help people to see
the absurdity of the pattern in which they have become stuck.
Creating a positive alternative: Showing how the situation might be. By
standing nearby and hugging each other, Michael and his children once stopped
another man from hitting his children.
Not being there for the violence: moving away or leaving. You can choose,
powerfully, not to get involved by intensifying what you are doing or by
withdrawing your attention or presence.
Intensifying: Amplifying what you are doing, to extremes if necessary. If you
are talking, talking louder. Taking centre stage in order to draw attention
away from something, for example, an argument that is brewing. This works
well in closed quarters.
Showing your boredom: Showing how boring you find this old, familiar event,
particularly if it is a chronic pattern of violence. Saying it is boring.
Saying what you see: Describing what you see. 'It looks to me like s/he
doesn't want to do it'. 'That looks painful. Is it?' Waiting for an answer.
Using your body: Putting your body in the way: momentarily (for example, by
walking between two people) or for longer.
Sometimes, it is important to be persistent. You are permitted to repeat what
you said or did, or to use another technique. This cannot be taken from you!
Michael emphasised the need to make no judgments about what you choose to do
(or not do). Each person does what they can given their own sense of personal
safety and their intervention skills.
What next?
I believe that the work of teaching people how to intervene nonviolently in
situations of interpersonal violence is very important and that, among its
many uses, it has value for those playing peacekeeping roles at nonviolent
actions. I also believe that the Australian Nonviolence Network should accept
responsibility for developing and teaching programs of this nature. If we
undertake this, our efforts would be enriched by seeking the assistance of
people like Michael Biernbaum and his associates, locally or from the United
States, who have concentrated their own efforts to understand and apply
nonviolence in this specific area. How might we start?
One thing that we could do is to share our experience on this subject in
'Nonviolence Today'. Would you be willing to write a letter to the editor
that tells us something about a violent (or potentially violent) incident in
which you have been involved? You could then tell us how you responded, how
you might have responded (now that you have had more time to consider) or you
could ask for suggestions from other readers.
And in order to incorporate workshops that teach this particular facet of
nonviolence into our education programs, we need a group of people that is
willing to learn nonviolent intervention of this type and to develop an
appropriate workshop structure and process. Perhaps a group of us could work
with Michael to design a weekend workshop specifically for Network members
during late 1995 or early 1996. This should give us the start we need to
develop these workshops ourselves. Please contact me at the address below if
you are interested in helping to design a workshop of this nature.
Michael will be returning to Australia towards the end of 1995. He can be
contacted at NVI, Inc., 1312 Jenifer St, Madison, Wisconsin 53703, USA. Tel:
+1-608-2563965; Fax: +1-608-2513704
Robert J. Burrowes
PO Box 176, North Carlton,
Victoria 3054