In most cases, marrying someone in prison is discouraged. Prison marriages fail at an even higher rate than other marriages. That being said, there are reasons why people get married to prisoners, including to facilitate the care and adoption of children. This article will briefly discuss some unique challenges to anticipate when marrying a prisoner.

Steps

Part 1

Deciding to Marry

1

Think about timing. There are a variety of factors that go into choosing when to get married. Some of them involve children or financial benefits. When marrying a prisoner, you must also consider the potential release date.[1]

If the release date is soon, you and your spouse will be dealing with the challenges of two major transitions at the same time

If the release date is far off, you and your spouse can adjust to being married and then to the release

Regardless of the release date, think about whether it may be best to wait until after you and your potential spouse adjust to release before getting married

2

Learn the prison rules. Each prison has its own rules concerning marriage. Talk with the prison chaplain, warden or other appropriate official to learn the rules and policies of your finance’s particular prison. Some policies include:[2]

Not all prisons allow inmates to marry

Some particular inmates are not allowed to marry

Some require the prison chaplain officiate

Many prisons do not allow conjugal or extended visits after the ceremony

3

Obtain counseling. You and your fiancé should seek counseling regarding your marriage, both separately and together. Some prisons require this prior to allowing an inmate to marry. Further, counseling will likely be beneficial after the prisoner’s release. Keep in mind that prison marriages have an even higher failure rate than marriages in which incarceration is not a factor.[3]

Part 2

Arranging the Wedding

1

Complete any paperwork required by the prison. Many prisons require a packet of paperwork to be completed by both potential spouses before granting permission for the wedding to take place. Check with the warden or other appropriate prison official to learn how to submit your application, if necessary. Some common paperwork requirements include:[4]

Proof that both potential spouses are of legal age to marry

Statements that the marriage is entered into willingly

Statements regarding the reason the wedding is requested while one potential spouse is incarcerated

2

Set a date. Unlike in a traditional wedding setting, the prison likely sets strict guidelines about when weddings can and cannot occur. You will need to consider these guidelines when setting your date.[5]

Some facilities only allow group weddings on certain days of each year.

Some facilities do not allow weddings on weekends.

3

Get a license. Every state requires potential spouses to obtain a marriage license prior to becoming legally married. This requirement is not waived because one potential spouse is in prison. Contact the warden or other appropriate official of the prison in which the inmate is housed to learn the process for obtaining this license. Often, the non-incarcerated potential spouse will be tasked with this.[6]

4

Locate an officiant. In many prisons, you will not have a choice of officiant because the prison will only allow the prison chaplain to officiate weddings. If you can and want to use your own officiant, some things to consider are:

The cost the officiant will charge, including any additional costs for travel to and from the prison

Whether the officiant is willing to undergo the security measures required by the prison

Some prisons maintain a roster of approved officiants

Whether the officiant will be allowed to wear any ceremonial garb, such as robes

5

Arrange for guests. Not all prisons allow guests to attend weddings. For witnesses, they require you to use prison officials or other inmates. If your prison allows guests, you want to consider:[7]

Any limits the prison may set on the number of guests

Any requirements the prison has for approving the individual guests (such as background checks, etc)

Any clothing restrictions that will apply to guests when entering the prison

Part 3

Getting Married

1

Be aware of the clothing restrictions. As with guests and the officiant, there will likely be clothing restrictions for the marrying couple. The inmate will likely be required to wear a prison jumpsuit. The spouse coming in should be aware of any restrictions on clothing. This may require that you forego a tuxedo or formal gown. Some clothing restrictions include:[8]

Many prisons restrict clothing with multiple places for storing contraband, such as cummerbunds and multipaneled, train-length and/or flowing skirts

Many clothing decorations are likely to set off the metal detector, such as metallic sequins or beads, jewelry, and certain inserts in high-heeled shoes

2

Leave contraband at home. Talk with the warden or other appropriate prison official for a list of what items may not be brought into the prison for the ceremony. Frequently, items that cannot enter the prison include:[9]

Cameras

Cell phones

Pagers

Outside food (such as a wedding cake)

3

Follow the prison’s guidelines. Prison officials will likely be standing by during your ceremony to ensure that no rules are broken, but it is best to talk to the officials to know what is and is not allowed. For instance, prior to the ceremony, you should determine whether there are restrictions on physical contact that will impact whether and how you can kiss once the officiant pronounces you married.

Community Q&A

If my fiance is away for domestic violence against me would we still be able to marry during the time he is in there?

wikiHow Contributor

You can marry whoever you choose to regardless of the crime he has committed. Although if he is in jail/prison because of reasons that you've stated, I highly doubt he is the best catch to marry! Chill out and wait until he is free to get married!

Sure. It may be better that you put off getting married until later, since you significant other (and perhaps you, yourself) has plenty to work through and reflect on while the two of you are separated during the prison sentence. Engagement expresses the commitment to get married -- and if you love each other, for now, that's enough.

Can an inmate at Atlanta federal prison get married and how long does the process take?

wikiHow Contributor

Try contacting the prison by phone or see if the information is on the website. If you are approved to visit an inmate there, on your next trip try asking the person at the entrance as they may know or can put you in contact with someone that knows.

South Carolina requires both parties apply together, in person, to get a marriage license. There is no way around this; because of this, there are no weddings done in any federal prisons located in S.C.