About Us

For those who wait, by those who wait.

Everything you see on WatingTillMarrige.org is written, edited, and curated by people who are actively waiting on sex. Even our web developer is waiting till marriage.

Our mission is to help those who wait through the unique challenges and hurdles that come with this path. We are not here to damn those who don’t choose to wait; we’re here to give a big, digital hug to those who do.

Staff

MikeSite Founder, Developer

Mike handles all of the programming and design work for WTM.org (and also writes the occasional article). Mike is a web software developer by day, and is in school to become a psychologist. In his free time he enjoys swimming, movies, and working on his precious, precious websites.

JulieTeen Moderator

Julie is a long-time member of WTM.org. She contributes to the site in a number of important ways, such as by suggesting new material for articles, forgetting to complete articles she said she would write, and by sharing her dry Scottish humour with everyone. She is interested in fan-fiction, dystopian novels, singing, anything to do with the Phantom of the Opera, and learning French.

KendraChat Master, Admin Assistant

Kendra fills her purpose on WTM.org by assisting the Admins through helping to manage members on the forums, keeping forums in their proper category, and offers input to new members as needed. She has a nitch for making sure the forums are organized and assists with reviewing any new material asked to look over. She enjoys spending time in the chat room when she can to help welcome new members, as well as enjoy hang out time with some original members. Outside the forums she finds value in personal relationships, enjoys sports, and much more!

MarkForum Admin

Mark’s job at WTM.org is to moderate the forums and make sure that all topics are categorized correctly in their proper places (as all good things should be). Mark is in his early 20’s and has been waiting all his life. He is currently pursuing a degree in engineering. In his free time, if he’s not browsing this site or other sites, or watching movies (animated, especially), you’ll find him playing Civilization V on his computer!

MatthewForum Admin

Matthew is a forum regular and tries his best to be thought-provoking or laughter-inducing whenever possible. He is in his early 20s and is finishing up an engineering degree. In his free time, Matthew enjoys playing his piano, playing video games, reading, going to the gym or spending time on the forums.

NicoleGirl’s Moderator

Nicole helps keep the Girl’s Only of the forums section going. She has earned her degree in Social Work and hopes to work with oppressed populations. She loves to read and learn more about people and what makes them tick. Her unique sense of humor allows her to bring laughter to the forums and the chat room even when others are not in the mood.

VinceSpamslayer

If WTM.org was a body, then Envincebal is the fist. He has lost count of how many spammers he’s crushed and the trolls he’s chewed out in his pursuit to maintain order. His lighter side is exhibited in the Viewer’s Discretion forum where he creates hilariously embarrassing and awkward threads to stimulate discussion. His inbox is always full of requests for wisdom and encouragement. You can usually find him online playing video games, at a restaurant enjoying delicious food or at a shooting range.

You!Any role you want

Want to help make WaitingTillMarriage.com even better? Contribute your skills and insights! You can have whatever size role you’d like. Alert us to a celebrity that we’re missing, write an article (or five) about your experiences waiting till marriage, help us plan new site features, or anything else you can think of. Got an idea? Make a post on the forums or send Mike an email here: mike@waitingtillmarriage.org.

More Info About WTM.org

We have members from all major religions (and atheists!)

There’s a myth that all people who practice abstinence are Christians. From what we can tell, this isn’t accurate. Although we do have many Christian members, we also have members of all other major faiths, including agnostic and atheist waiters. Waiting on sex is as much a personal decision as it is a religious one, and our diverse membership reflects that.

We have members from all over the world

We are happy to report that there are people waiting till marriage for sex all over the world. We have members from every English-speaking country, and a growing number of members from countries where English is a second language.

Our guy/girl ratio is more balanced than you might think

One of the popular misconceptions about those who wait is that all of us are girls. This myth persists even among waiters. Most girl waiters who join our site are surprised at the number of guys who are also waiting.

We’re growing!

WaitingTillMarriage.org currently recieves about 16,00023,00039,00046,000 56,000 unique visitors a month, and we’re growing at a rate of about 5% per month.

How to Contact Us

81 Responses to “About Us”

Hi all!
Firstly, woow! This is such a great site. I’m 23, a female and I currently live in South Africa. I’m in my final year at a university here doing my undergrad in Economics & Finance. I am also WTM but my goodness, today was one of those very hard days when I’m asking myself why on earth should I wait, it can be so hard! I was flooded with all kinds of thoughts and emotions that just made me feel so challenged. I decided to open my laptop and see if there are other people like me out there, oh man! I was so motivated by some of the articles. Thank you so much! Got my eye back on the ball.

Wanna know if you guys get to meet? Well for those who are in the same areas or so. I’m single and I would love to just be able to talk to other girls and guys that are single and WTM. Maybe I can meet someone here. You should totally start a twitter account too! ps my reason for waiting; I wanna totally belong to ONE man only, I have so much love to give like most ladies out there but I feel it is more special if it’s channeled to the right person and not just any guy + I’m a christian and my faith happens to fully support my sentiments. 🙂

@Rebecca – Thanks for the follow! Facebook page coming soon. We’re just now starting to get social media ramped up. Admittedly, I’m kind of bad at it. Like any good introvert, I’m at my best when I’m locked in my cave creating new features and writing articles. I’d love some help running the social side of WTM.org. But until some Facebook-addicted, extraverted girl comes along (my ideal social media czar), I’ll be striving to keep our Twitter feed full of interesting stuff for waiters. Please let me know if you have any suggestions!

Even if u don’t use it for lots of interaction, the Facebook page would be good for posting new article links (like Twitter). I believe some organizations use sites like Hoot Suite to help make “multiple social media” more manageable.

Haha No pressure though! We introverts don’t like pressure! 🙂

Btw – Through a random search, I happened upon (& loved) your “11 reasons to wait” list. — I loved it for many reasons but mainly because it was 1) unique among “reasons to wait” lists 2) mentioned superheroes & 3) was just generally awesome.

@Rebecca – Yeah I’ve been using HootSuite! I really like it. Random question: is it a party foul to have the same update go out via Facebook and Twitter? Do you want to see unique content from both, or do you kind of expect to see the same updates at Twitter & Facebook?

Also: I’m so glad you liked the 11 Awesome Benefits article! It’s definitely one of my favorites too, if I’m allowed to have favorites.

Mike, I don’t think it is a foul at all. Some people use Twitter or Facebook, but not both. Also, I think it increases the likelihood that more folks will see it the more places u post. I actually still prefer email updates. I love Twitter and Facebook but it can get kinda overloaded with my fave organizations mixed in with my friends and family updates. Does that make sense?

@Rebecca – Points well taken. Will see what I can do in the future! I didn’t actually know that people still liked to be emailed about things. I thought the time of the email notification/newsletter had ended. Guess I was wrong! Also: Email notifications for comment replies would require that we actually ask the commenter for their email addresses when commenting, which puts some people off. Will have to think about that. Could just make it optional.

I think it is dead for Some. However, I think teens grow up, become young adults and discover they still have to deal with email(however annoying and inefficient it is). I think this is mainly because of college email accts, work accounts etc. Also with the option of sending email to smart phones, it can end up serving as another “instant message”?

I dunno.. I could be totally wrong, but that is how I see it and notice other people using it.
If the email notification option is there, people can choose it or ignore it.

Hello, I just found this site through a friend and I really enjoy it. I think it’s awesome and I can really relate to the problems that waiting can cause. It does make me feel better to know I’m not alone on this road, but I would like it if there were articles on how waiting until marriage has affected the homosexual community. I’m a lesbian and waiting for marriage and I find it much more difficult than my straight friends. It would be nice if the site could address the issues we face aswell.

@Nataya – Working on that! For now, you’re welcome to come hang out in the forums. We have several gay members that I’m sure can give you some great support and advice about waiting specifically in the gay community.

Hi Mike. I’m so glad you are one of the many (though few compared to other sites) people who add an extra option to avoid compromising on sex and have a place on the web to exchange thoughts and ideas.

I’m 31 and am still waiting and it has gotten increasingly difficult in these times to stay pure. I’m also a Christian and am committed to my faith in Christ to remain pure until marriage.

hi,you have not shown Buddhist symbol along with other religions.
Buddhist too have to follow wait till marriage rule.
Best wishes for you people.
Well i hope this work will guide other generations also coming after me and when i would have passed away.

extra marital affair is too much damaging to the society and individual as well.No matter how people who don’t care this say that it does not matter but it is very clear that it just gives frustration in life only
and children’s life also becomes lot tense..
Thanks.

I want to thank you for creating and maintaining this website. I am all the way in Hong Kong and i am so proud of you all for taking the effort to fight for one of the most fundamental and important truths about sex. You’re all my heros, God bless you all and may His Spirit strengthen and enpower your work here.

I’ve only come to realise the importance of waiting – i sadly did not wait and screwed up. But when Christ saved and redeemed me, He graciously also gave me one of His daughters who has waited. One of my life regrets will be that I will not be able to give her the special gift she saved for me on our wedding night. But i also do thank her so much for waiting for me. It is by grace.

If only more and more young people would grow up against the hook up culture we have now, marriages would be strengthened and i believe society as a whole will change.

So to Mike and team, if you haven’t already heard this, you are all changing the world one person at a time who is encouraged and sustained by your work here. So i thank you all and salute you for this.

Hi! I was wondering.. What’s the average age of members who have shown their age on their profiles?

I am 25 year old Canadian muslim girl, and I feel like while my beliefs about wtm were respected and admired by my friends in high school and university, now my beliefs are seen as an abnormality, and I feel alienated because of my beliefs

. I am dating less, because i think my beliefs of my value as a potential girlfriend is decreasing because of my beliefs about wtm. However, i am also worried that if i dont go on dates, i wont end up getting married later on. I do not feel comfortable with arranged marriages. Do you have any blogs by people who are the same age as me or older that you think would be interesting for me to read?

Hey all!!! wow it’s so nice to know that there’s a group like this. Lately, i’ve just been feeling so alone taking this stand. I am from the Philippines but i am based here in China working as an English teacher.

anyway, I do hope to meet friends and chat. Gosh i do have a lot to share and i believe i need support as well. I have my weak times too. Those times when i question this stand, when people criticize for WTM. Yes, I have dated guy who just gave up after know that i am taking this stand. Sometimes is makes me doubt my decision.

Oh well, I am so excited and happy to be here. So hope to chat with you all!

I am a gay Christian and thanks to you I see that I can hide behind “waiting for marriage” when my parents ask why I haven’t brought a girl over yet. It’s also great for validating my internalized homophobia. Thank you do much.

@Thank you – Actually, gay waiters-till-marriage are a fast growing demographic! As gay marriage grows increasingly legal, gay men and women now have something to wait on (hard to wait until marriage when you can’t get married). We have several gay members here at WTM.org, and there are even more over at GayChristian.net.

I guess you could use WTM as a mask to hide your homosexuality from your parents. If you have really bigoted parents, that’s probably a pretty effective cover. Anyhow, thanks for the comment!

I am a 19 year old female who is curiously seeking an answer to my question. I am not religious, and it is by choice, and learning from a previous mistake, that I am now waiting for marriage.

My Christian friend keeps telling me that a good Christian man is known for his strong moral foundation and desire to save sex for marriage and so my question is: what does waiting for marriage include?

If a man is waiting for sex until marriage, but they have had blowjobs, handjobs, numerous random makeout sessions, etc., then in my opinion this is no better than a man who has gone ahead to actually have sex before marriage. In my opinion, a sexual act is just that, and I don’t think a good person would be looking for loopholes to satisfy their sexual desires.

What do others think about this? And what is your strategy for meeting like-minded people when it comes to truly saving yourself and all sexual acts for marriage?

I had never thought that I would come across such an amazing site! This well meaning melting pot is sure to go a long way…even beyond my generation and this very thought makes me happy.

This site has articles that are really uplifting and comments tell you that you aren’t alone! Being a Hindu from India I have been brought up in a culture where people WTM, with which I was absolutely fine with as I knew my parents had good intentions in doing so. But these days I come across many more non-waiters who are have a higher rate of break ups & divorces which makes it very disheartening. Hence, along with many friends, I’m happy I have made the right decision.

And just like one of the article said, ‘it does get easier after college’.
So any teenagers plannin on waiting hold on, because you are in for the most beautiful experience of your life which will mak you respect yourself and others as well.

You know…it’s insane how God works sometimes. But long story short, I am 22, close to a month to being 23, and at a point in my life where I have lost some hope (but not entirely). I recently stopped talking to someone who “I thought was going to end up being a successful relationship,” but as soon as the topic of waiting until marriage came up, it went downhill from there. He wasn’t a big fan of waiting, so I was extremely emotional about it and almost decided to break my promise and give it all up. It has been extremely hard, but I still haven’t given up and have continued to keep my promise until I marry that ONE guy that will be willing to wait for me. All it takes is a little leap of faith and staying true to a long-term promise that purity is the best gift you can give someone when you marry that one person God has saved for you.

So in that case, I want to say thank you for creating such a reassuring website! I have no idea HOW I found it, but I am really really glad I did. Praise for those that are continuing to wait until marriage, and hopes that we may continue to be strong to such an amazing promise! I hope to meet new people and create friendships from this! Thank you again!

I am a 23 year old,Ugandan by birth and currently living here. I am a nutritionist by training, and i am practicing that. Yesterday was really amazing! I finished my day’s work at 1300hours(EAT),that means i had about four hours ‘to do my own stuff.’At that point i was really missing my boyfriend who is currently in Swaziland,South Africa(he has been there since Feb.2014). We have chosen to wait to have sex till that night-we are really looking foward to that day!!! Crazily, I just typed ‘I can’t wait to have sex’ in the Google search engine…i got more than i bargained for when i came across this site!I read this article line by line, read through most of the reviews.Honestly, this encouraged me, motivated me and inspired me to stick to the decision to WTM. Actually,i realized there are many more benefits of WTM than i ever realized! I am glad there are so many young,successful and smart people willing to wait WTM, especially the gentlemen:-). I never thought any actually considered it worthwhile.
I have shared the article, ‘The top ten awesome benefits of Waiting Till Marriage’ with my boyfriend and i am eagerly waiting for his response.
Thank you Mike and the team for this. I am really blessed by this site 10/10!
And thanks to all the awesome people that have made this unique and ‘not-so-easy’ decision to WTM.It is no piece of cake, especially in a world where everyone is entitled to have their own point of view. Bravo!
Mike, Can i get wristbands shipped to Uganda? I would love to get some.

Finally. I’m telling everyone I know about this wonderful site. It’s so hard finding someone who wants to wait also. But I’m loyal to God and I’m not budging. It’s nice to know there are others. Let’s keep growing!

All of you are so young, so thought i’ll give some encouragement to older folks – i’m 44 and still waiting. And to make it worse, i definitely want to marry a virgin man – cos i really think sex is something a husband and wife shares and not something a husband and wife shares along with HIS past lovers!!! So i am sure i’m truly unique, cos most virgin women don’t care if their men are virgins!!

So i’m really holding onto a fantasy, as a friend recently told me – she said there are NO virgin men left above the age of 17 that are normal (and not weird)!!!

i don’t believe her.

And i was googling and found your site! I can’t believe you have such a site to make people like me feel like we are NOT a ‘fantasy’ we are as normal as anyone else!!

And another thing – i am gonna prove that i CAN find a virgin man to marry, and if i do, i’ll come here and talk to you guys about it, cos really we need to ENCOURAGE each other that sex belongs within marriage, and not to be constantly derided as having fantastical beliefs, or impossible values!

I am new to this site, I am a waiter. getting married soon. but I have some serious questions about my future wifes past. I need to know if your info. here will help, please e mail me. 826637tanner@gmail.com thank you Tanner

Mel,You are one very special woman and I applaud you for sticking to your principles. It is rare but so refreshing to hear.There are many virgin men out there and you should not be ashamed of asking for that from your future husband. I suspect it may be difficult but not at all impossible.

You are not at all a fantasy. You are the real people of this world. From the man side of the fence I will tell you that we guys are under enourmous peer pressure. I often hear men brag about their “conquests” as though sex with a woman is some sort of battle to be won – but I do assure you that not all men are like that.

I take great pride in being a gentleman always and treat everyone with kindness and respect. But some women find that a huge turn off (why God only knows). They seem to find the rude agressive so-called “alpha males”……to put it bluntly the hump and dump type…worth their time and worth giving their bodies to rather than true men who will love and be with them always.

I maintained my virginity until the age of 24. I would have waited until I married at 27 but my future wife was not a virgin and there seemed little point in abstaining. I regret that now as our wedding night sex was just ho hum and not the wonderful mutual experience I had always hoped for. You see it is NOT only women who have this belief…there are many men who do too.

I wish you all the best and sincerely hope that you find the right guy. Remember also that age does not matter when you love someone. Find your virgin man…he is out there.

May be I can help. I married a woman who was not a virgin 38 years ago. Unless you are head over heels in love with her I would say do not do it. Marry a virgin. If you marry someone with a sexual past you will have to live with it for the rest of your life. You can never change the fact that she had sex with somone before you. You will always be compared with the previous lovers (even though she will say she isn’t) bacause women cannot help make such comparisons. It is in their DNA.
I do not regret marrying my wife…we have had a wonderful life together. But the pain and anguish I still feel to this day has been a very high price to pay. There has not been a single day in my life that I do not wonder what jointly losing virginities together on your wedding night would have been like.

You will be denying that to yourself and, unless you are unfaithful to her, you will never ever know what a womans virginity is like.

In my opinion you have to weigh this VERY carefully. Believe me you will be in for a lifetime of heartache and soul searching.She will not talk to you about past lovers and you will be on your own and isolated in your thoughts. You will always have it in the back of your mind the men she has been with and it will never ever go away. If I knew then what I know now I think my decision would have been to stop kidding myself, break off the relationship (as hard as that is to do) and find yourself a woman who, like you preferes to save her virginity for you. That very fact will mean you have much in common and the basis for a rock solid marriage.

You should tell the woman you are with now exactly why you are breaking this off. There are plenty of virgin women out there who will respect you so much for being a virgin too. Perhaps she will then realise that there is a high price to pay for sleeping around.

Hope that dpoes not sound severe but I have lived for 40 years in the shadow of another mans sexual encounters with my wife and it is sheer purgatory and a very lonely place to be. If that is what you want go ahead and marry her. If you really want to marry a virgin – you know what you have to do.

There are many men who feel the same as you do. Our views are suppressed because the fashionable thing to do (according to the media) is to sleep around and screw as many women as you can before the age of 20.

I never had that view and have paid a high price for maintaining that stance. Ridicule from the men and mockery from many women. It is a hard and difficult path to tread – but it is the right one.

When I see people who married others who they knew slept around going for a divorce after a few years I just laugh and say what did you expect. Leopards never change their spots. If they slept around before marriage they will sleep around after marriage. They have no moral compass.

I think it is one of the fundamental driving forces behind the high divorce rate in our society. Many say it is money issues but I think that is a smoke screen for the deep seated anguish that trying to live with someone elses sexual history creates. The only way to avoid it is for both you and your wife to have a common sexual history with each other. That way there is no baggage, there is no comparison there is only exploring each other and finding new and better ways to satisfy each others sexual desires.

Ashley,
I am not a particularly religious person but I do strongly believe that men and women should not sacrifice their virginity before marriage. Often this is spoken of as a one-sided women only issue. In other words the women are expected to be virgins but the men are expected to sleep around before marriage. It makes no sense. With a roughly 50-50 split between men and women the men sleeping around are taking someones virginity so it follows that these principles must apply equally to both men and women.

As someone who had to make an agonising decision years ago whether to marry the women I fell in love with and forego virginity or break up the relationship and wait for the virgin I expected I can only tell you that I so deperately wish my wife had said no to her former lover. My heart was broken in 1975 and it is still in pieces after all these years.

Stick with your faith and your principles. You will find a virgin man who meets all of your expectations. Save your virginity until your wedding night. Never give i to temptation…the price is far too high.

Heyyyyyy !!! Mike! I saw your comment in august 2011, in the “virgin map” stated you were 28. So, in 2015 you are 32, rigth?
It’s great !
I admire and respect you for your decision to stay virgin till your marriage! May be you have found her since? I mean may be you finally found your wife ?
If it is the case congratulations! If it’s not, you can be sure God will give you a great and mighty reward.
It’s really great! Your wife and children will be so blessed!
I pray God He can enable more men like you.
God bless you Mike.
And thank you for this site!

I just want to take the time to thank you for all the deep answers you have posted.
It is so helpful and so precious to me!
Thank you for your honesty and for sharing this part of your life.
This encourages me a lot to stick to my decision to honor God : I want to be a virgin when I marry and I also want a man who is still virgin.
With God nothing is impossible.
Even if you are not religious, your advice is really helpful as an experienced man.*Thank you so much

Hi James Morice!
I saw your comment on 2012.
I admire you so much for your decision. You have all my respect.
I am also a christian and I am a black girl who waits till marriage. I live in Paris France. I am 33.
It s not easy for a woman, but for a man it’s even harder.
So I encourage you to stay strong James Morice.
May be you have finally found her ? 🙂
God bless you

I am going to be conducting a study that builds on some of those same ideas. What our study is going to show is…
1 – Having sex with a man doesn’t help him fall in love, make a woman more special to him, save a failing relationship or even guarantee a commitment will follow.
2 – If a man is using a woman for sex, it is very unlikely that she will get a commitment.
3 – When a man is serious about a woman, he will wait a long time for sex. A lot of men would even wait for marriage.
4 – Most men prefer virginity in the woman they marry.

The survey is developed (www.SexAndVirginity.com) and has been tested on a small group of people and we got the initial results we expected. We are ready to take the study to the next level and have a credible market research company conduct the study with a larger sample size and then release the results to interested parties. And we are hoping that you would like to receive the results (its free).
Thanks
-Doug

Even if you slept with someone once and you deside to wait, i am verry happy with your choise. Because no one is perfect so if you are honest with the person you are planning on marrying and they love you and know that you are sorry for your mistake…i am sure you will be fine… It takes a good person to admit that they made a mistake and a wise person not to do it again.

Hope all of you will find the perfect person to share your life with!!

i’m so glad i found this website tonight. i am tired of girls rejecting me just for being a 29 yr old virgin (30 in July). please send me a validation email. it is not being received in my email. i already checked the spam folder and resent the validation email several times.

Never received validating email address email, with link to click on to validate email address. Never came to junk or spam folders either, requested this validating email be sent again via the website several times. Also emailed about this asking for help to the three contact email addresses listed: (waitingtillmarriage.org; mike@wtm.org; and contact@waitingtillmarriage.org) – with never any response. Can not gain access to this site still per my join request, due to this; when ever I try to use my log in, the site prompts me to use the email sent to validate my email address. There has been no help or response for this; has this site become in-active ???? I see posts since as recent as July of this year, and this is September. Please help. I would love to join this community. I have this in common, waiting until marriage to have sex. It will be great to join up with others who have this commonality, for many reasons.

big up great humans. av found myself here miraculously n at da right time.I couldnt imagine we have such a group in this world.av been planning to lead such a lyf but was not sure whether it could b possible. am strong now and ready to share with my fiancée coz we have just started pushing the day so we have not messed up.surely u are blessed n keep up esp Grp Adm. thenx once more!

I love this site. I found it on a day when I felt no was was waiting. I am a Christian aand it seemed like when I told the guys that were asking me out I sound abnormal. So I googled up because I needed encouragement and I saw this. But I have tried to register countlessly and it keeps saying I did not pass the human test. Thanks anyways, I still want to join .

For singles: Freedom from sexual pressure ESSAY
Any comments?
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I have always thought that it was the religious faith that we embrace that motivates all of us to be sexually and morally pure in our state of mind and body. We can think that it is “A still small voice” of God that motivates us to do what is right concerning sexual purity; but early childhood experiences teaches us ideas that God never intended us to believe about ourselves.
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Parents, teachers, family members, friends, religion and even strangers will try to motivate older children, teenagers and adults through logic, deductive reasoning, bribery, rewards and collusion; but the minds of very young children are emotions driven and logic is beyond their understanding.
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You can tell a very young child that God loves them and that they are special; but their experiences in life will seem more truthful than your positive thoughts expressed. If a child stops playing with a toy in the bathtub and runs naked out into the living room as his mother is greeting a group of people and he is severely scolded by his mother who has a very angry, fearful or hysterical countenance; you can bet he is wondering why he is being shamed, punished with harsh words and spanked in front of others. Or if he is in the kitchen and shirtless with only his underwear on, and he puts his hand inside his underwear and scratches himself and he is spanked for his actions. You can bet he feels his sexuality is dirty, sinful and very much something to be ashamed of. And if she is very religious she might even add “God doesn’t love you when you do that”.
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Even when parents and others go out of their way to ensure their child isn’t shamed, their child can still pick-up messages from other children who are treated bad and therefore they claim the message conveyed as also belonging to them. Everyone has their own set of demons that torments them and if we are careful; we don’t have to pass on our sexual fears and prudishness to the 3rd and 4th generation in our family.
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What is the best way for humans to have “Real victory” over sexual temptation and lessen our desire to violate our commitment of moral purity before God, self and others? Wouldn’t it be great if all public, private and religious schools would teach young people and adults to not be ashamed or embarrassed of their body or of sexual pleasure?
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Every child is reminded to not drink a lot of water before going to bed, because no adult wants to be inconvenienced early in the morning. Every group before getting on a bus or in a car is reminded to take their restroom brake so that no one has to make an emergency stop and no one wets or soils their clothes. So our parents, and educational system (at all levels) should teach every citizen of our country that they need to “Defuse” their raging sex hormone problem before they are tempted to defraud another person in a relationship.
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God gives us a strong sex drive that is supposed to motivate us to get married so that we don’t have “Unnecessary temptations” to be confronted with or have to resist. An individual getting married mainly for sex is the mail reason for the high divorce rate. Bringing too much emotional baggage into a relationship or being a high maintenance mate are other reasons for the break-up of marriages. Permanent celibacy is never a Heavenly mandate from God, and the lawsuits against religious leaders prove that point very clearly and succinctly.
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In these last 6,000 years, Satan gets you, me and others to believe and teach that no one has the right to enjoy any sexual pleasures while single. In Christianity and other religions we are made to believe we need to suffer in our single years; and marriage is our only hope of deliverance from lustful thoughts and actions. We treat our bodies very cruelly. If my bladder or colon needs to be emptied I will search for a restroom and solve my problem. But if my body wants and demands a sexual release; then everyone tells me that I need to be more spiritual and ignore my sex drive; this is easier said than done. In our youth, it is very difficult to get to sleep if we don’t deal with our sex drive.
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If I have a next door neighbor named Sam and I asked him, “Would you approve of my 18 year old son having sex with your 18 year old daughter; or would you rather my son meet his own sexual needs at home, before they go on a date”. Sam will consider my son and his daughter more righteous if they “Both” do not defraud each other on a date and they should seek to meet their own sexual needs in solitude. They need a mother-daughter talk; and a father-son talk. The misinformation that children pick-up coupled with fearful parents afraid of the truth about self-pleasure; reveal that this truth can set all of us free from the lies we believed in childhood, teenage and adult years.
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I can understand why amoral individual representing organizations that want to capitalize on unwanted pregnancies that will encourage teens and adults to take their condoms and enjoy themselves for a season of pleasure. But when caring and loving people of faith completely ignore the most logical way to drain off unwanted sexual tension they promote lustful acts and that starts the arousal of the sexual predator that is in all males and females). We are messengers of God to bring deliverance to those captivated by their own basic primal instincts when we encourage singles to meet their own sexual needs.
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When we are very young children, our parents were “Literally” like Gods to us; they seem to know everything, were all powerful and demanded complete obedience from us (just like God). Very soon in life we dethrone our human gods and hopefully put the Creator God on the throne of our lives. But even then, most of us continue to think sexual pleasure is to be resisted and feared at all times while single.
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Do you realize that if God had of put the dense concentration of nerve endings in one of our elbows instead of our sex organ; we would be ashamed of our elbow (because it feels so good to touch it) and at the same time we would look for someone to message our elbow for us?
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Some peoples and tribes around the world are less plagued with sexual phobias that modern day societies struggle to cope with. Their women go topless and no female feels shamed or lusted after. Mainly because they only look at female breasts as human milk machine dispensers (and are not identified or considered as a sex object). Until most of the world would adopt that viewpoint, there is no way a sinful self-centered world can embrace their lifestyle.
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The main physical reason we wear clothes is because of the climate changes and sanitary concerns. Even if all people on earth had high moral values, we would still feel more comfortable in this fallen world if others wore clothes. Since our bodies are chemical factories and emits bodily fluids, no one would want to sit where other people sat if it weren’t for clothes.
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Theologically speaking, it would be impossible for God to disapprove of anyone meeting their own sexual needs; simply because it is “Our own” body; lust always involves another person. As long as you don’t involve someone in person, via phone, picture, or magazine etc. then you haven’t defrauded anyone; and you are still righteous in spirit, mind and body.
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If all singles met their own sexual needs and not defraud other people; then there would be fewer rapes, date-rapes, child sexual abuse, incest, abortions, and sexual promiscuity.
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Teaching abstinence is great; but that idea alone doesn’t eliminate
the problem of lust.
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Sincerely,Arthur@ArthurTrafford.com
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P.S. Most educational and religious leaders don’t care to offer single religious people a way to flee from youthful lust. God gives all humans the same way to escape sexual temptation; either a mate is responsible to meet the sexual needs of a person, or a single person has the responsibility to meet their own sexual needs until God gives them a mate!!! Any other viewpoint is cruel, unloving, unreasonable and demonic.
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Publish this letter in local newspapers,
on religious and personal web-sites

I’m a Christian mexican virgin girl 22 years old, and had been struggling with the V fact… I have a big history of my chrstianity, I’ve always tried to be real to God.. but when you get 22 and more, you start thinking about it… Well, I had a great revival in my life, I quit Friends (well, they quit me), quit me, all to serve and know God.. of course when that happened I was sooo happy and did all that for living Christ.. but the pastor kicked my ass… And well, I got really disapointed sience then. Im still a virgin and want to keep my self for marrige as I preached everyone who know me,I would’ve feel really hipocryte If “I got to the word” or con sleeping arround.. but has Im virgin and it has cost me a lot, I want a VIRGIN man.. cos I think everyone who waits deserves someon who waited.. but what really disapoints me is that (well in the US) almost 80 percent of Christian (ir more) had premarital sex.. I mean, whats wrong with This peaple… they just disapoints peaple about christianity and think that God most not be real cuz se dont keep his commadments. Alright, I just found This site and want to join you guys, I have not a lot of real encourangement, my sister is Christian now but she sleeped arround a LOT before ir, my mom neither my other sister saved themself for marrige, and never talk about sex.. so if they tried to encourange me, I would recive it… I need some congruent Christian counseling…

Absolutely no one around me (friends, friends of friends, friends of friends of friends of friends of friends and so on, family members, people I know), nobody is celibate near me. Life is very, very hard.

I suggest anyone without family support, being made fun of by the economy and pop culture…. Get loud in NEWSPAPERS. I don’t care if you are 16 or middle aged. If you want a virgin I suggest listing out realistically what you need in the personals sections…. We are way too quiet. With the exception of a few authors in Missouri I don’t see hardly anyone talking about the flipside to feminism.

I am fed up with people ignoring science. As a woman I am not biologically the same as a man. Women belong in the home (the majority). I know many a woman who is psychologically damaged BY WOMEN. It’s not the men that are instigating the abuse… it’s the women who are spread too thin. Your mother probably abused you or lied to you. If not your family.. someone in pop culture.

I know a lot of gay people that want partnership and want to lose their virginity in a marriage. They are not for casual sex. The media is not mimicking reality at all.

I dare all of you to get really loud about what you NEED. I would not pray another day. I would TAKE ACTION.

It doesn’t matter whether you are religious or not…. ACTION will bring you what you need. I think it’s highly offensive that people are intimidating these virgin men. The quiet types are bullied and sometimes killed now…. It’s not funny.

WaitingTillMarriage.org is a support group for people
who are waiting until marriage to have sex. All content is
written, developed, and maintained by people who are waiting (or who waited and then got married).
We're here to meet new friends and make life easier for those who wait.