This past year my family completed the first – and last – year of homeschooling. There were ups and downs, good points and bad points, and in the end we all learned some very valuable lessons.

First, I gained a lot of respect for parents that homeschool. From organizing lessons to making sure their children are comprehending their class work to simply holding their children’s attention, homeschooling involves a lot of work and planning for parents.

Second, I learned there are many benefits that come with homeschooling. You can set your own hours. You are able to take days off when necessary. You can determine what your children are learning. You even have the option of choosing how they learn – you can work from workbooks or from a computer-based curriculum that older children might find easier to use.

Third, and most important, I discovered my children are simply not meant to be homeschooled.

Seriously, I love my kids, but keeping them together 24/7 only proved that the best thing for everyone involved is lots of space, lots of distance. Keeping them in close proximity for long stretches of time is like driving a truckload of nitroglycerine down an unpaved potholed road. Inevitably, the smallest arguments would lead to full-blown war.

It wasn’t just my kids, though. Homeschooling simply didn’t work for me and my wife. My work schedule keeps me out of the house all afternoon and night. That would leave my wife to do the majority of the work by herself. Difficult work when you have a 7-year-old boy with ADHD and a 9-year-old girl can be as stubborn and exasperating as a teenager. That along with the amount of work needed to teach our kids and hold their attention just did not add up. While homeschooling might work wonderfully for some, it is definitely not something for everyone.

That’s not to say it doesn’t work. Our kids still got an education. They still got socialization at Cub Scouts, football, baseball, church youth group, Sunday school, Girl Scouts, gymnastics and karate. We were able to attend homeschooler picnics and a co-op for homeschoolers where my son and daughter took violin and chorus classes. They were also able to use FaceTime to stay in touch with their friends who also homeschool but moved away.

When we started this it was with the understanding that we were going to try it for a year and see how it worked out. If we liked how things were going we would continue. If not, we would put our kids back in school. It was definitely worth the effort for me because it fit our family’s schedule. It also meant I would get to see my children every day. As it is now, I see them in the morning for a few minutes and then at night, when they’re (hopefully) already asleep.

That part is a bit of a let-down for me, but since my kids started at school again their relationship has improved vastly. There are still arguments and flare-ups but on the whole they are more amicable toward each other. They aren’t tired of each other and play nicely – to a point. But that is because theirs is a contentious relationship. No more than any other big sister-little brother dynamic.

I would still recommend homeschooling, but would caution that it is definitely not an easy alternative to school. You have to be accountable for you children’s education and make sure they are keeping socially active. That’s a big responsibility, almost as big as figuring out which curriculum you are going to use. If you can handle it though, getting to spend those hours with your family is worth the hard work.