9 Good Excuses, Bad Excuses & Funny Excuses for Missing Work

Thinking about mirroring Ferris Buehler’s Day off? We don’t blame you. Whether it’s too cold and miserable outside or it is too warm and beautiful outside, you want to take advantage and not miss out on what life has to offer. Sometimes, this requires playing hooky once in a while, which can be accomplished the best excuses possible, not silly ones elementary kids would say.

Let’s take a look at the nine good excuses, bad excuses & funny excuses for missing work:

Good Excuse: House Emergency

Life happens. You woke up on Monday morning and found your bathroom flooded. The boiler is broken and the only time someone can fix it without waiting for a prolonged period of time is this afternoon. Your refrigerator, stove, and/or microwave is sparking.

A house emergency is one of the most common things that happen, so it’s one of the most naturally believable excuses for missing work.

Good Excuse: Emergency at Home

Life happens – part two. A family member broke his leg. Your spouse’s distant aunt passed away. Your cat got sick and is on the verge of dying. These are all family emergencies that happen all the time, which, once again, are believable excuses for missing work.

Good Excuse: Babysitter Problems (if applicable)

Since you returned to the workforce, you have relied on a babysitter to look at your child instead of the ultra-expensive daycare – seriously, you’re working a full-time job just to cover the cost of daycare.

Unfortunately, on this day, the babysitter got sick and is unable to make it. Because of this, you can’t find another babysitter in time to care for your nine-month-old or your three-year-old (heaven forbid if we’re talking about a 15-year-old). The only thing you can do is stay home from work and care for the child.

Good Excuse: Car Troubles

You made a left turn at the stoplight, but some wiseguy decided to speed up as the light was changing to yellow. As a result, one side of your automobile is completely damaged. Or, if you want to refrain from embracing the theatrics, then you can simply inform your boss that your car battery is dead and you have to wait a while until the CAA or a tow truck arrives on the scene.

Good Excuse: Illness

The previous evening, you had a delicious plate of butter chicken, in addition to a Boston cream cake, three bottles of Pepsi, and a midnight snack in the refrigerator. The next morning, your stomach is in excruciating pain: nausea, heartburn, indigestion, and diarrhea. It’s bad.

Or, you came down with the flu, and you will need to rest in bed for the next day or two.

As long as you don’t fib about having a complex illness, like rheumatoid arthritis, poliomyelitis, or delusions of grandeur, then you have a believable excuse to miss work for the day.

Bad Excuse: Death in the Family

First, there is something morally unsettling by using a death in the family as an excuse to miss work. It just doesn’t feel right. Second, it is easily verifiable by the human resources department if someone related to you recently died. Third, perhaps the company wants proof of death, so they will request a death certificate.

Bad Excuse: Too Tired

In this day and age, we’re all exhausted every minute of the day. As soon as we wake up in the morning, we’re tired and want to go back to bed. There is nothing cozier than waking up at 6:30 a.m. on a cloudy Wednesday and your humble abode is warm and comfortable. Unfortunately, you cannot use this as excuse because, once again, it shines a negative light on your disposition.

You never want to seem too tired. Remember, you don’t want the designation of Low Energy Frank or Low Energy Sally.

Funny Excuse: Hungover

Well, at least you’re honest about it.

In all seriousness, though, telling the company that you cannot come into work because you spent the previous night partying, getting drunk, and throwing nickels against a convenience store brick wall is not only a terrible representation of your constitution, it’s bad for your career and disrespectful to the firm.

Funny Excuse: Dog Shut Off the Alarm

“Hello, this is Art Vandelay. I cannot come into work today because I’m already four hours late. What happened? Well, my dog shut off the alarm. No, seriously! I went to bed and put on my alarm as usual and my dog went into my bedroom and fiddled around with my phone and he seemed to deactivate my clock application, and so —- hello? Hello?”

Now that’s a lame excuse for an excuse. Who would possibly believe that your golden retriever broke into your bedroom, turned on your phone, scrolled through your mobile apps, and deactivated the alarm clock app? If you think you can get away with it because it’s too outlandish to be believed, then you’d be mistaken.

Who doesn’t want to miss a day of work once in a while? You may be a hardworking individual who burns the midnight oil when the company needs you to. That said, there are times when you just don’t want to get out of bed, or you feel like making a pitstop to the Mandarin buffet, catch a motion picture, and return home to go to bed early. That’s the life! There are believable and unbelievable excuses – which one are you going to use?