Bewdas declare Modi's Mann Ki Baat as fake, argue not possible to do it without getting drunk

New Delhi. Bewda Association of India (BAI) held a press conference yesterday and raised serious questions about the authenticity of PM’s radio address to nation called Mann Ki Baat.

BAI president Bijay Kallya told the media, “We seriously doubt the genuineness of Modi’s Mann ki Baat as it is highly impossible to do Mann ki baat without the help of alcohol. As you must have seen in your friend circles, true Mann ki baat only comes after 4-5 Patiala pegs or may be even more depending upon one’s capacity.”

One needs to be as high as Modi’s hand to do Mann ki Baat.

“I had my doubts from day one when a Gujju (Read Teetotaler) was promising Achche Din. You see, no one knows Achche din better than us as we are king of good times. Yet we believed in him, thinking after living as a Gujju may be he wants to change and really bring good times for whole of India. Then he announced that he will do his Mann ki Baat on weekends. Blame me if mention of good times and Mann ki baat during weekends does not clearly indicate towards a good drinking session with friends,” reasoned Mr. Kallya, who is also a part time second year engineering student.

“Our suspicion started when we came to know about the telecast timings of Mann Ki Baat. 11AM?? Come on… Isn’t 11PM a much suitable time for Mann Ki Baat? If you do not agree to me, just listen what he talks about during Mann Ki Baat. Beti Bachao Beti Badhao? Is this PM’s Mann Ki baat? Come on…” asked a rather furious Mr. Kallya.

Mr. Kallya continued with the press meet with his own Mann Ki Baat. “Do you think Modi’s actual Mann Ki baat can be complete without any Shehzada Jokes? Won’t he brag about the beautiful countries he has seen in recent times? Don’t you think he wants to give an earful to Arnab for his Noisehour? Don’t you think he wants to say something to his own people like Saakshi Mahraj and Arun Jaitely? I am dead sure, if he really talks his Mann ki baat, he will talk at least 30 mins about Advani ji.”

When asked what changes he suggests to the PM with regard to Mann Ki baat program, Mr. Kallya said, “We have only one suggestion. Either change the name of program or change its content. We are there for help in any case. After all we have supported Modi ji since he was CM of Gujarat, as most members in our Bewda Association of India (BAI) belong to Gujarat. We seriously hope that Modi ji will listen to us and do a real Mann Ki Baat after having at least 2 glasses of Raja-Fisher Beer. Only few gifted people like Ashutosh can talk like drunks without getting drunk. I don’t think Mr Modi has that ability in him,” signed off Mr. Kallya.