I find calm-mannered peacemaker people relaxing and easy to be with. A hot-head is NOT a good match for me.
I am perfectly fine with just being with a date that does not necessarily include an unending stream of conversation. Sometimes it is nice to just BE with people and enjoy their company.

(quote) Meg-920823 said: Yes. I think calm is very attractive. I see it, potentially, as an indicator of strength, depth, self-control and confidence in self (i.e. not trying to impress anyone but comfortable in his own skin.)

I would like to think you just described me among other guys ... Some calmness derives from good training. Advanced diving, or combat/martial arts training are good examples where inability to remain calm can be fatal - that's not to say the duck ain't paddling like crazy just below the surface! For many, (men and women) this ability to control panic will extend to most situations in life, and such a person will be thought of as calm and level headed (even keeled).

(quote) Jacqueline-556574 said: I find calm-mannered peacemaker people relaxing and easy to be with. A hot-head is NOT a good match for me.
I am perfectly fine with just being with a date that does not necessarily include an unending stream of conversation. Sometimes it is nice to just BE with people and enjoy their company.

Yes, quiet time together is wonderful...to not feel the need to always talk.

From my own experience...I tend to attract type A personalities, what would be called choleric or sanguine on CM. They are drawn by my calm nature (or peacefulness), which provides something that many cholerics and sanguines sometimes lack in their own faster paced lives. Like many phlegmatics, I tend to be observant and lean towards non-confrontation. Invariably the same aspect that attracted choleric and sanguine women to me gives way to a perception of stoicism, and (in my case) some of these women start pushing buttons to see what it takes to get a rise out of me.

(quote) John-146319 said: From my own experience...I tend to attract type A personalities, what would be called choleric or sanguine on CM. They are drawn by my calm nature (or peacefulness), which provides something that many cholerics and sanguines sometimes lack in their own faster paced lives. Like many phlegmatics, I tend to be observant and lean towards non-confrontation. Invariably the same aspect that attracted choleric and sanguine women to me gives way to a perception of stoicism, and (in my case) some of these women start pushing buttons to see what it takes to get a rise out of me.

Some can feel that receiving that emotion from you (vs. stoicism) is a way of bonding. It can seem too, to some, that without visible reaction, there is not empathy or concern.

Calm is good at this point in my life. I like smooth sailing, not boring; smooth. I've had enough rough seas. But calm would have to be a secondary or third-place personality trait. It doesn't take first place at all for me.

Ability to attach securely to a potential spouse is even better, since I can tend to have an avoidant attachment style. Short synopsis of attachment styles for adults: Avoidant+secure = good. Avoidant + anxious = not good. Anxious + secure = good.

(quote) Margo-404841 said: Calm is good at this point in my life. I like smooth sailing, not boring; smooth. I've had enough rough seas. But calm would have to be a secondary or third-place personality trait. It doesn't take first place at all for me.

Ability to attach securely to a potential spouse is even better, since I can tend to have an avoidant attachment style. Short synopsis of attachment styles for adults: Avoidant+secure = good. Avoidant + anxious = not good. Anxious + secure = good.