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This Friday, Jan 26th I will be speaking about living with anxiety challenges and mental health for Creative Mornings. I HATE anxiety. Hate it. But my love for stopping mental health stigma by sharing my story is stronger. I'll also talk about facing our normal, everyday anxieties.

Registration opens this Monday at 11am. They go quick so make sure you sign up ASAP.

Don't Let Your Job Make You Snap: Discrimination, Mental Illness and Reactions to the Shootings of Virginia Journalists

I was absolutely shocked when I went online Wednesday
morning and read that someone killed two journalists live on air and the gunman
was a former co-worker. My prayers go out to the loved ones and colleagues of
WDBJ reporter Allison Parker, 24 and cameraman Adam Ward, 27. What they all endured
was inhumane.

According to various news sources, the motive for Vester Lee
Flanagan killing these young journalists was racism. Flanagan was a gay black
man. He alleged that Parker made racist remarks, and after reporting her she
was later promoted. Ward reported Flanagan to HR after one day of working with
him. BuzzFeed reports a year after Flanagan was fired he filed a lawsuit
against the station for harassment, racial and sexual discrimination and
retaliation. Memos from the station claim he was difficult to work with and
made others feel uncomfortable and threatened. They referred him to get help. WDBJ
fired Flanagan two years ago and his anger was stewing ever since. Flanagan also settled a race discrimination lawsuit with Florida station WTWC in 2000.

I don't know if Flanagan's allegations about WDBJ are true or not. I don't excuse his rage and I certainly don't agree with fighting racism, with hatred and violence. However, I do want to discuss racism in journalism. It's not uncommon in this profession. I’ve experienced both racism and
sexism in the newsroom and other media jobs. I had one job where I pitched ideas
during a meeting and no one responded. Yet, when a white guy suggested the
exact same thing minutes later, everyone raved. One time a Black male colleague
tried to hug me and then told me to sit on his lap. I’ve been underpaid by,
self-proclaimed “feminist” supervisors, despite having more education and work
experience than other co-workers. My point
is racists, sexists, jerks and morons exist in every race and gender. And yes
they work in the newsroom. Thankfully,
I’ve also worked with wonderful men and women of all races who continue to support
and uplift me. Still, I understand how incredibly frustrating it is to
experience racism and sexism or be held back by them, when all you want is to
work and grow in your career. Sometimes it’s not your job duties that annoy you,
but the people you work with.

When people are driving you so crazy on your job, that it’s
taking a toll on your mind or body, it’s time to leave. I wanted to write about this even before this
recent shooting. My last job became
stressful because of office politics and disorganization. Some of my co-workers
were hospitalized due to stress. Working
there made me physically sick. I developed fibroids and digestive problems. The
daily drama was toxic to my body. Budget cuts to my department was the best
thing that happened to me. I believe if I stayed, I would’ve had a mental
breakdown or a stroke. I know of a few people that died from the stress of
their jobs. A relative told me that a friend of theirs was found dead at his
cubicle hunched over his keyboard. No job is worth losing your life or sanity
over. If you don’t think the workplace is going to change for the better -- get
the heck out of there. Figure out a plan, look for other jobs, get training, go
back to school, do something.

Journalists and victims Allison Parker and Adam Ward.

Oprah shared in this great interview with Stanford Business School that when she was co-hosting a local show with a male, she made less.
She asked her boss for equal pay and he said no because she was single and
didn’t have a family. Her co-host had a family and therefore was entitled to
more money. Oprah didn’t fight it, she left the station. And look at her now! I’m not arguing against fighting injustice at
the workplace. During that time, gender discrimination was taken as seriously. Oprah
said she knew the situation wasn’t going to get better. She could’ve allowed
the job to get the best of her; instead she sought out another place to work.

And after you leave that job, let that stuff go. Flanagan admitted
to carrying a lot of anger after being fired, and in his life. He said that he
endured homophobia and racism from other people. Anger can be consuming whether
you have a mental issue or not. He wrote that the shooting in Charleston was a
tipping point. I imagine those people who died in that church wouldn’t agree
with him killing, especially out of hatred. He killed Allison Parker and Adam
Ward, but inflicted more pain on their loved ones and his loved ones. Killing
them didn’t solve anything. Flanagan was from Oakland and I’ve seen his
relatives on the local news here since the shootings. I cannot imagine what his
father is going through.

I cannot imagine how the parents of Allison Parker and Adam
Ward are feeling.

As for the mental health component to all of this:

All of these major shootings have been at the hands of men. We
need to encourage men to express their emotions, feel their emotions.
Discouraging men from feeling sad, hurt, etc. by saying they’re less than a man
is damaging. Some of these men are in emotional pain, and their solution is a
gun. I guess that’s because expressions of anger and violence are considered
more manly. To me it takes more strength to work through your pain. I’m not sure if Flanagan was going to therapy.
Some of these killers have mental illness. But people kill whether they have a
mental illness or not.

Marginalized communities need more emotional support and
tools in how to handle the psychological impacts of discrimination and stay
mentally healthy. Oppression can take a toll on your mind. We hear so many
stories of gay and trans youth killing themselves because family or peers do
not accept them. Racism, sexism, xenophobia, etc. can impact others psychologically
as well.

I heard in a news story today that Vester Lee Flanagan
texted a friend after the shooting and said he did something stupid. Stupid is
not the word. What he did was wrong and sad.

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