Wow. Long time, no update. I kept meaning to update, but never got the chance. So what all has happened?

Oh yes. May have found an apartment. It is way cool to think we found a place. It is a good one too. I am so excited, but I don't want to get my hopes up just in case we can't get it.

Wore my new sandles....they made my feet literally bleed. I still have scars and scabs. Gee, perhaps sandles weren't the best idea for me. I am hoping all I need to do is break them in and they will be fine...but I can't break them in without killing my feet. It got so bad I had to take a cab home....8 blocks. It was a 60 cent cab fare.

Ok, so the thing with last Thursday night...I thought it was all good and all...but as I said, if I start to analyze things, I lose all good feelings about them, and it happened. Now I question whether or not it was a mistake. I saw the other person this weekend for the first time since it happened...and we basically exchanged no more than 4 words. Has our friendship payed the price? And for what, one night of fun? If so, then it wasn't worth losing this friendship over. I would go back and redo everything if I had known this was going to happen. I am going to see this person again tonight. Will things be ok? Will we still be friends?

Saw JC Superstar again. It was actually much better than last time. I really kinda enjoyed it. All except for the part when the man playing Judas (u/s) fell off the stage into the orchestra pit. It was the scariest thing I had ever seen. I guess it made me realize that this job isn't all the glamour and fun I had always thought. Things do happen...dangerous things...potentially fatal things. It really struck a nerve with me. I almost saw a man die. He almost died in front of almost 2000 people. Just the thought of that really disturbs me. It sends chills up and down my body. It surrounds my with an empty feeling...void of senses. Time stood still for a moment that night.

I got my income tax return the other day. It was a big, whopping $5. Yay! What the hell am I going to buy with that?! Oh well...I had only been working a few months. Next year's will be a little more.

Boys Don't Cry. Wow! Amazing movie. I couldn't speak after seeing it. It really struck something in me. I highly suggest it. Be forwarned...very graphic. Not for the weak hearted or close minded.

I got a pet now! Well...kinda. I downloaded a virtual pet (see fun link above). It is a fish. It's cute. You have to feed it and play with it and make sure the water temp is ok. He swims around the computer screen and just has a jolly good time doing it also. You can buy things for him like rocks and plants and special food by gaining points. You gain points by printing things on your computer. Needless to say I printed about 800 copies of one thing in order to rack up the points. Kat named him Bickle and is WAY too excited about the whole thing. I keep threatening to kill him just to scare her. Go..get your own Bickle. It's kinda fun :)

It's now only about three weeks til Jim leaves. This is so hard. I can honestly say he is one of my best friends. I've been able to tell him more things than I've been able to tell a lot of people here. I know he is only going to be gone a few months...and time goes by so quickly anymore that he'll be back before I have time to realize he's gone. And I'll be gone for a few weeks in June anyway, so it won't be all that bad, right? Right?! I keep telling myself this so I can survive the summer months. And he is supposed to be getting back in time for my birthday, so he can party with me still. Just warning you though...I'll need a lot of support once May 21 roles around.

That's going to be quite an emotional day. It is the day of the AIDS walk, so that is going to physically exhaust me, and I'm sure there will be speakers who will emotionally affect me. And then seeing Jim inFootloose (considering I get a ticket somehow) for the final time ever that night will cause even more emotional strain. Oy. I'll nickname May 21 "Tissue Day."

And now that I sound like a complete stalker freak (too late) I shall quit.