The picture above makes me sad for two reasons. First of all, my arch rival CHERYL BURKE is the focus of the picture. Second of all, that dude missed an opportunity to shove his Sharpie in CHERYL BURKE’S fat mouth and shut her up for once and for all!

Isn’t it an unwritten rule that Mop Head is not allowed outside during “Dancing with the Has-Beens’” off season? And what the hell is she doing anyway? She looks like she’s in pain and about to cough up a hairball. I swear, CHERYL BURKE is going to be the death of me! I’ll get her soon!

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