We heard her get up to go to the bathroom about 8:15 and realized that we hadn't heard anything from her at about 8:30ish. Dave went to check on her and found her. We can only guess that her heart just stopped. Since Dad died in March, her decline sped up. She was living from dialysis treatment to dialysis treatment. It wasn't much of a life.

We had a great weekend, dinner with the Beth's boyfriend's family, on Sunday she and I got her a new phone and had ice cream, then on to church. Monday she was very weak, felt dizzy. We think it was the new medicine which we stopped. Tuesday she was still dizzy and decided to skip dialysis. Yesterday she felt better, but was still somewhat weak. I stayed home with her but she wasn't interested in conversing much, she just felt that bad.

For a few weeks now, Mom's been considering what her life had become and was thinking of stopping dialysis. She almost never felt well and everything was tough. It even got to where breathing had become a big effort. She wasn't really enjoying anything except talking to people.

The other thing that happened on Monday is that she met with a spiritual advisor, who answered questions for her about what the end of her life might be like, what God's thoughts would probably be if she did choose to end dialysis, and if she'd be welcomed with open arms. Yes, of course she was welcomed with open arms, Dad's, Rusty's, Aunt Bobbie's and my Grandma Bessie were all there to greet her. I'm sure there were tears of joy.

4 Comments

Yes that was a beautiful way to look at it, and not only is she whole, it seems like she is exactly where she wanted to be! I do believe somehow we do have some kind of control in that sense...when one is suffering and makes peace with death, it comes upon them peace and graceful.

K, it was such a peaceful end. Thank you for sharing. I know you will miss her, but I know what you mean about her being whole now. When one spouse leaves without the other, it can seem torn. God bless you. Your mother was so lucky to have you.

Thank you for this beautiful way of seeing things... I recently lost a great man to brain cancer... and Yes... he is whole and happy now.... I only got to be a part of his life for a short while, but the blessing was mine for knowing him..... I am sorry for your loss, but also see you sent her with love...... sending you lots of hugs today...

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