Thursday, 28 June 2012

I’ve seen the warnings about how to plan your transport and
how to avoid getting caught in unusual rush hours. I’ve followed the debate
about what to do with the big stadium after it’s finished. I’ve seen Wenlock and Mandeville in shops now, and I’ve even seen a few kids on the tube
carrying the little Wenlock dolls. I’ve been enraged by the various conspiracy
theorists who think we’ll all die in 2012. This can only mean one thing: THE
LONDON OLYMPICS ARE JUST A MONTH AWAY.

Like with any major sporting event, the adverts have all
cashed in too. A while ago we looked at the Superbowl adverts, so now let’s
have a look at some of the adverts in the build-up to the Olympics after the click:

Monday, 18 June 2012

After I decided it was better to live in Gotham over Metropolis (because both are dangerous but one is more fun and relaxed), I
also expressed a huge number of insights into the nature of Superman: his
radiation poisoning gives him telekinetic abilities. After this it was
suggested that I do the same for Batman. But his story is incredibly well known
and unsurprising, apart from a few obscure conspiracy theories. His parents
died and he went on a self-destructive international journey but happened to
learn ninja and detective skills on his way. Big whoop. You know whose stories
are interesting, though? Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown
and Damian Wayne. That’s right, Robin. There’s a lot to know about Robin and
most people don’t know anything. Yes, Robin sometimes wasn’t even a boy!

Monday, 11 June 2012

Previously I weighed up the
benefits of living in Metropolis versus living in Gotham, and we discovered
that Metropolis is just as dangerous as Gotham without any of the edgy,
rock-and-roll fun. Metropolis is pretty boring and one of the best reasons for
living there is proximity to Superman. He’ll almost definitely save your arse
from the wide variety of disasters, accidents and crimes that occur regularly around
the city. He is a living god in humanoid form and he’s also a really nice, down
to earth, responsible guy. He’s practically perfect in every way! Well, almost
every way.

Friday, 1 June 2012

A while ago I told you how car companies Smart, Renault and
Nissan were all releasing electric cars this year. Electric cars with realistic
range and power, not just token gestures for showrooms and trade expos. We
examined the adverts and ultimately concluded that I want a spaceship. But it
has to be a good spaceship with faster-than-light travel and everything.