Are you going to continue this story? It's very good. Had my heart pounding and everything. I hate people who cheat but I don't mind reading about it if there is a plot of revenge and a chance to ruin the person who cheated. You're a very good writer, so I do hope you continue to write (even if that means not continuing this story!)

Wow, Lysander is so obnoxious! He can't just say that stuff to her! If I were her, I wouldn't spend a spare second in getting rid of him. Anyaway, I think you really give a good idea of her character here! She's really strong, and so much fun to read about. I can see a little of Draco in her, but she's really just herself. Great job :)

Ok, first thing, I love stories with the Scamander twins! They deserve more attention I think! So I'm pretty excited to see what you do with him. Sandreiah already seems really interesting and she sort of fits in to stereotypes, but then at the same time I don't think she does at all. Which is good! Its hard to say a lot with the first chapter, but I'm really looking forward to reading more! Yay!

I like the way that you have written the coldness at the start of the chapter and that they both have it and its equal. A mood is always lighten by a food fight(even when only talked about). I like that Lorcan doesn't want or believe that his brother can make it with the Preparation. But then its like Lysander is having second thoughts. I like that one of the reasons that he wanted to join was because of the jealousy between them. But I cant believe that she says sorry and now they are back together is quite soon. I kind of feel like yelling at her a screaming why like you want at that girl on tv.

I have always wonder if there could be some kind of creek within the Forbidden Forest. The Preparation sounds quite different and I like that you have so many different idea so far. I like that he asks her to wait for him but at the same time I can understand where she is coming from. I think that you really explained this part well, in the way that he was expressing himself but also her thoughts. She should not have to compromise her beliefs for him but they should met in the middle. I love that she just tells him that or close to. It shows she is a strong person. But they are both stubborn. I think that it really set the story having this chapter just be only both of them after just her.

Hey there
I like that you ended this chapter with the title it really brings it back. Also the name Sandreiah its very different I never seen or heard it before but I really like it. I like that you haven't got it right from the bat being a Draco's daughter and a Weasley or Potter. I like that its Lysandar and her it really makes it different but even if later there is some Weasley or Potter thing this has made it very different from the rest out there. Also her thoughts are very flowey.

What a prick! Lying to her face like that! Good for her that she kept her cool at first; technically it could really have been something harmless, but when he wouldn't say after she confronted him ... I don't know if I had believed him so fast.

So we've met Roxanne; it seems like he's telling her lies as well as Sandy.

The plot seems to thicken, which is good. I look forward to seeing what'll happen next :)

I liked how Scorpius tried to protect his sister, and she had to call him off. Also, I think I am growing to like Sandy, she's got spunk. Lysander acted very suspiciously in this. Maybe I would have had her noticing that he'd been acting strangely only after Scorpius told her about the gossip; kind of letting the past weeks run through her mind again, you know? Then again, she really seems more reserved after their fight, so it works just fine as it is.

I have to admit this suprised me. I didn't expect them to make up again so quickly after their fight, but it was also nice that they talked it out, and that he revealed the reason he was considering joining the Preparation.

It was funny how you had Lysander check her for possible weapons (i. e. food) before talking further with her.
Good chapter :)

They really didn't hold back, did they? I can't help but agree with Sandy, that he's had a lot of things to criticise. The sentence about his love being rather conditional was pure genius! Which makes me wonder why they were together in the first place, several times? I guess I'll find out; let's see what happens next :)

Not that it's really a problem, but if you happen to edit the chapter again at some point, here's some spelling mistakes that I'm sure were only oversights:

I may be known for my blunt honestly - honesty
Yeah, and I'm not the only one who thinks that way neither - 'not ... either' vs. the pair 'neither ... nor ...'
It is the one thing I can't stand the most about you sometimes, Sandra - 'most' sounds so positive in my opinion, maybe 'the thing I can stand the least about you'.
Only my personal opinion though, the rest is really good!

I am terribly sorry, I'm two days late. I'll start with this story if it's alright? I've been looking for a good story about the Scamanders lately, so this is perfect :)

Okay, I liked her narrating and summarising those things as an introduction to the story; and I thought it had just the right length for a prologue. Well done so far, kudos for grammar and spelling! It's always a plus if I can concentrate on the plot right away.

You have my complete undivided attention. I now have to favorite this story and keep reading. I just have to know what she is going to do about that two timing little scum bucket. If it was me, revenge would be top on my list and it would be so sweet.
The funniest thing about this chapter was the fact that while I was reading this chapter my daughter was watching Aladdin behind me and right as I got to the line, "Did you think I was stupid, or that I wouldn't figure it out?" Jasmine said the same thing to Aladdin in the movie. It was just one of those moments that couldn't help but make you smile and make you want to share that coincidence with the author.
I am in love with this story and I think you and your beta are doing a great job.
Happy Holidays.

Another wonderful chapter, you and your beta make a great team. I didn't notice any bit grammar mistakes that needed to be fixed. The story flowed very well and it was all very believable. I liked the interaction between the brother and sister. It reminded me of my own brother, even though he is younger than me, he would do the same thing.
I don't normally read next generation stories but I am definitely hooked on this one. I really like that Scorpius is in Gryffindor, it is something new that most people don't think of. I am not sure about a brother coming up with the catch him in the act plan, I would normally think of that as a girl kind of plan but it works very well in this story and with his character. I am glad that you added in the classic "if he hurts you I am going to kick his ass" statement it really brings out their relationship.
I also wanted to add that I think your chapter images are wonderful.

Happy Holidays from your secret Santa.
I have to say that I love this chapter. The argument was very believable and parts of it made me want to laugh.
I liked that your characters are being so blatantly honest with each other in creates a good sense of believability. It also helps with the story flow creating a seamless story line.
I though it was interesting that Lysander prefers structure and plans considering that his mother was very much in the moment kinda girl growing up, so I guess he must get it from his father. I also thought it was funny the way he was complaining about how she dresses, especially when you think about the fact his mother use to wear radish earrings and lion heads.
I am not the best person to ask about grammar, but I didn't see any obvious mistakes. Overall I think you have a great story in the works here and I am excited to continue reading.

Sorry for taking so long! I've been busy as school has just started.
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I absolutely love this story. I didn't see any big mistakes with grammar and spelling. The flow of your story was quite smooth and you portrayed your characters well. *Thumbs up*

Finally, Sandreiah's making a stand! The idea of her writing a letter was brilliant. Personally I would have confronted the girl face to face and would have told her exactly what I thought of her - but a letter works brilliantly too. I can't wait to finally meet Roxanne and figure out what kind of a person she is and what she has to say for herself. I despise Lysander of course; I can't wait to see his reaction when he finds out what Sandreiah has done - it'll be funny to see him panick and attempt to worm his way out of the situation.

I really like Iris's character - I could totally see myself behaving the way that she did in this kind of situation. If it wasn't for her, Sandreiah probably wouldn't have sent the letter, so I'm glad Iris managed to bring her to her senses. Now that's weird, because I never imagined myself to be capable of uttering a positive word about Pansy Parkinson or any other member of her family.

I really enjoyed this chapter and I'm very anxious to see what'll happen when Roxanne gets her awaited letter. Lysander thoroughly deserves what's coming to him - hopefully Roxanne will dump him as well and he'll be left with nobody.

Anyway: a brilliany chapter, I really enjoyed this!

- Katie -

PS: Another lovely chapter image; you've gotten so good at making graphics Deana!

Oh dear. So he's playing both of them then? Ugh, he makes me feel physically sick! We haven't actually met Roxanne yet, so it's difficult to sum her up, but from what I know about her already I think that Sandreiah did a top-notch job of summing her up in four syllables: home-wreck-ing-slut! I'm sorry, but is Lysander a complete idiot? I mean it's one thing that he's attempting to date two girls at the same time, but a complete other that he actually thinks he won't get caught in the process. I'm surprised she was so cool about it the first time round; if it was me I would have dumped him and in the most humiliating way humanly possible so that his reputation was so tattered and unfixable that nobody would ever dare speak to him ever again - she should listen to her brother; he knows what he's talking about!

Lol, I just realised: Roxanne and Roxandreah both have the same nickname - Every time I read the word Roxanne now i'm compelled to think of Sandreiah's mother. If my boyfriends 'other girl' had the same name as my mother, I probably wouldn't be able to look my mother in the eye for months, it'd just be too weird for me.

I like the way this story is headed. I wonder how Sandy (can I call her that because Sandreiah's a bit of a mouthful and I'm very eager to read the next chapter) will decide to go about dealing with this revelation. Will she confront him straight away, or will she keep quiet and sneakily attempt to sabotage Lysander and Roxanne's relationship? Ooh, I'm excited! Off to read next chapter as soon as I hit the 'publish review' button.

Oh no he didn't! He's cheating on her with Roxanne! I just know it! I assume that's why Rose hasn't told Scorpius absolutely everything that she knows; she wants to protect her cousin.

Ugh, I hate him hate him hate him - cannot stand cheating love rats; I've had bad experiences with them in the past which have made my stomach turn. Seriously, my sympathy goes out to Sandreiah. How dare he cheat on her! I hope he gets exactly what's coming to him.

New character new character...and it's SCORPIUS - one of my favourite Next Gen characters. Considering this is your first experience writing him; I think you did a brilliant job! I like how eager he is to look out for his little sister; it's nice to know that Sandreiah atleast has him to turn to seeing as Lysander has decided to behave like a total waste of space. Ugh - I can't wait to see Sandreiah get her own back on him.

This is exciting; I get the feeling that everything is about to come to blows in the next chapter. I'm anxious to go and read it now so i'll keep this short.

Loved this chapter; I'm very excited to see how this story will develop in the future.

Honestly, I can't help but laugh at these two; one minute they're furious at eachother, the next they can't keep their hands off eachother. I'm interested to discover exactly what Lysander will do to drive their relationship to such a point where there is no room for forgiveness but plenty for revenge. I can imagine that the 'other girl' will almost certainly have something to do with it though. I've already commented on Sandreiah and Lysander's characters in previous reviews, so in this one I'll focus on Lorcan:

What can I say? I love him! One minute he's glaring daggers at Sandreiah, and the next he's completely turned on Lysander and giving her appreciative smiles. I really like the way you've characterized him; not making him out to be the exact duplicate of his twin - it's nice to see a variation n their characters, you don't often see that in stories with these two in.

That last line: 'If only I had know then how everything was about to change. I would have gotten away while I still had the chance.' has got me anxious now. What's going to happen??? I'll just have to wait and see.

I really enjoyed this chapter. Again; you've done such a good job of telling the story, keep it up.

DEANA!!! I'm so sorry that it's taken me so long to get this review to you. I've been so busy on the forums, what with the House Cup going on, and on top of that my real life has been IN-SANE! I'm just so relieved that I've managed to find some free time recently.

I-really-hate-Lysander!!! How dare he say all of that stuff to her about her personality and dress-sense; I mean, that's just pure rudeness! He made it sound as though she was inconveniencing him simply for being herself. If I was Sandreah I would dump his ass and then totally get revenge by humiliating him in front of the entire school.

I really adore how you've characterized Sandreah; she embodies traits from both of her parents, but at the same time she has that streak of individuality about her - she's not afraid when it comes to expressing herself and being true to who she is. I also admire how loyal she is to her family and doesn't like it when anybody offends them. She's obviousy a very strong protagonist and I hope, for her sake, that she gets her revenge on Lysander. In my opinion he'd throroughly deserve it!

I love how creative you are Deana. The Preperation sounds awesome - like something that could really exist in the Wizarding World you know? Not just in this story either, but in all of your stories, like the gypsies for example - you have such an awesome imagination!

You wrote this chapter very well. I particularly enjoyed the way that you told the story in general; you always provide so much detail, not just in the character's surroundings but also in the dialogue as well. I like the general story so far, it has a lot of potential at the moment; I'm interested to see how the plot will unravel and how the characters will develop. I'm also quite excited to meet this Roxanne girl; she sounds like a potential villain in this whole thing, though I could be wrong; I'll just have to wait and see won't I.

Salutations, and hello, my fellow Gryffie! It is I, Lucky, here with your review! You haven't gotten one of my reviews before, so I'll warn you, I comment on everything...and I have issues with brevity! ;)
Let's get started with the standard first chapter package, shall we?
Your summary: 10/10. It was spiffy! I liked the attitude.
Graphics: 10/10 They are quite pretty! (I also like the Gryffie sigs you've made, but *ahem*) So good job to you!
Title/Chapter Name: 10/10
My favorite parts (done as I read):

“Sandreiah Malfoy. It’s pronounced: San-Dray-Uh. Yes, I know, it’s a stupid and I hate it.”
-Gotta stop here. Her name is AWESOME. And unique. Bonus points for you. :D

“Roxandrea”
-That’s fun to say! *says it about ten times*…anyway!

“I wouldn’t want to bore you with all the details of my sad-sob, sorry excuse of a social life.”
-Aw, shucks, Sandy. I know you’re lying already. Of course you want to! Go for it! ;) I like the attitude that she has…it’s like, fine, if I MUST tell you….(when we know that she wants to)

-…Okee. I am officially making a cool name section: Lysander, Lorcan, Roxandrea, Sandreiah,

“You see, Lysander and I have been seeing each other on-again and off-again ever since the start of our fourth year here.”
-Oooh. Things are getting juicy.

“Something like: "Oh no, this is going to be another one of those stories about some jealous, revenge seeking, teenage girl with a hormonal imbalance and insecurity issues. Blah, blah, blah…"
-Guilty. J But that’s okay, because I’m having so much fun reading this POV that I don’t care.

“We Slytherins may be more respected and less hated, now that the great war is over with and all, but that doesn’t change the fact that we are still proud, and most certainly are not the sort of people you want to mess with.

My name is Sandreiah Malfoy and I always have the last word… Don’t believe me? Well, just watch and listen.”
-Oh. Snap. Well, this looks good. And this last part catches you and doesn’t let you go. It’s fabulous.

The Ever Dreaded CC: Hmmm. *scans story* I guess I have to say that it’s a lot like an evil villain monologue (Mwahaha, anyone?). But…er…*looks around hastily* that’s kind of what I liked about it. ;) It may not be for everyone, but it was for me. So good job, and sorry that I couldn’t find anything else to pick on.

Flow: 10/10. It didn’t jump around, you told the story, you got the readers hooked. ;)

Originality: 10/10 I haven’t read a story like this, which is saying something. *confetti falls on your head*

First Chapter-ness: 10/10. It was a first chapter. And it was a good one! You did it well, dear.

Cannon: 10/10. Yeah…I honestly don’t care about how next gen meets cannon. Roll with it, baby! And roll with it you did.

*Looks Up* Well. That was long winded. I hope that my stream-of-consciousness style chatter didn’t put you to sleep. :D This chapter was fun to read and as a reader, I wanted to read the next chapter. That says it all. Great job, cool names, and interesting plot. Please feel snuggled and welcome to return to my review thread for chapter 2. Just remind me which chapter I’m supposed to be reading.
Hugs and Bubbles!,
Lucky

I loved this chapter :) A nice bit of revenge before lunch just hits the spot ;)

The idea of her writing a letter back was brilliant, really original and it really works well here. It's the sort of thing I would be tempted to do, so it's certainly realistic and what she writes in it is fabulous, very true to character!

I love her having second thoughts and Iris picking her up to do it again. It's very un-malfoy from our experiences of Draco and Lucius but it would appear that they really are changing for the better, which is great to see :)

Iris is just brilliant, she reminds me so much of a friend of mine it is untrue! She os just like what I imagine her mother was like and the 'girl talk' between them both was brilliantly written :)

I really enjoyed the whole chapter and I'm really looking forward to seeing how this all ends :) Please pop back to my thread once you have new chapters! You've done a great job with this story and I have enjoyed it so much :)

Her anger at Roxanne was just perfect, it was so funny yet you really got the intention across, especially the whole 'other twin' part of it, that really has to be my favourite bit so far just because, without intending to, it made me laugh so much :')

You have nailed Sandy's emotions everytime so far, and it's great to see the change in her from quite passive to almost agressive over a chapter, I really do think she is fabulous, I love her, she's just wonderful to read :)

I loved it when she was toying with him about knowing he'd been with Roxanne :) You got that spot on, it reminded me of my cats when they play with their toys, she knew just how to get what she wanted :) She has really sewn him up good and proper, I really don't envy him for the position he is in here, you don't mess with a woman, especially if she's a Malfoy and I really think he's going to regret this!

But that twist with the letter! FANTABULOUS! It was sheer genius, I never thought of that at all! So sneaky and underhanded but so good how she's going to get her own back! I seriously cannot wait to find out what happens next ;)

Brilliant twists in this chapter! Definitely getting much better the more I read, not that it wasn't already great to start with!

It was lovely to see Scorpius make an appearance, and to hear all about the relationship Sandy has with him. You really tackled that well :) And the part of big protective brother was written perfecty, I should know, my brother is rather like him actually!

You built some intrigue and tension into the chapter which was lovely to see and it broke the 'happy' mood well, prepared the ready for a bit more tension, I like it :) and hippogriff dung. I could have rolled with laughter if I didn't have a laptop on my knees! I may come begging for that in the future, it was brilliantly funny :)

You have a real knack for displaying other people's thoughts and opinions through Sandy's POV, and this must be so difficult to do when your writing but it really does make a difference when reading. It makes it easy to comprehend and integrate yourself with the wider world outside Hogwarts and the little Sandy/Lysander circle.

A fantastic twist in this chapter with what Scorpius tells her, you get the relationship bang on in my opinion and characterisation as well. Lysander's fear of Scorpius is quite funny, and Sandy's threat at the end of the chapter is quite funny yet menacing :)

There's just one thing I'll say before I get down to all my lovely nice bits, sometimes you seem to get a bit carried away and the tenses don't quite match with what's being said, it's a tiddily little thing and I'm being very nit picky but I think your writing deserves to be at the best possible level as it is superb :) Double check for typos as well, in a few cases it's just a letter missing, and they are very few but I'm a bit of a freak for typos. having said that, I make many myself and my readers often have to point them out!

Anyway, onwards to all of the lovely gushing things I have to say about this, because it was, yet again, another splendid chapter!

You have really got the characterisation and POV's across in this chapter. You are endearing your readers to Sandy, if I may call her that ;) and that's no easy feat so well done! You've used humour well to break the tension and stop it building too much and again, it's hard to keep this balance but I think you have done splendidly to stop it becoming too angsty or too comical, so again, well done!

I loved the sudden 'ganging up' on Lysander, you really got this down well and it was a pleasure to watch Lorcan and Lysander arguing! You really nailed that, and knowing friends who are twins the whole twin-telepathy thing is spot on ;) They are all so easy to relate to, and I think this, in part is due to the way you write Sandy's thoughts in so delicately that it gives us all we need and want to know :)

I was so pleased to see them make up :) They really do have this feel of being star crossed lovers and I love that the road is a bit bumpy for them. You've managed this really well and the cliffhanger at the end is foreboding, a tantilising teaser for the next chapter.