Friday, October 06, 2006

Some rules, regulations and policies just seem utterly pointless. Take, for example, the McDonald's dip policy. Now, this may have been in operation for some years but last night, at a drive-thru close to Castleford, was the first I'd read about it. 'Strictly one dip per person extra dips 7p' is Ronald's policy. Certainly in the past I have asked for "a large handful" of dips and been given three tomato and three barbecue for my cheek. Alas, after reading this notice, I shall never dare ask for more than my share ever again. The daft thing is that most McDonald's have sauce dispensers within and young customers fill a fair few little paper pots up with sauce before opting to leave the tap running and flooding the counter with ketchup, tripping up, dropping their little paper pots and having to go through the whole exercise again. So, if it's a question of economics that drives Ronnie's policy, the frightening looking fella is wasting his time as the problem has moved beyond anything that a 'strictly' enforced policy could ever halt effectively. And why can I only have one dip for free before the charges kick in? Aren't I paying a ridiculous amount for this bloody awful but addictive food in the first place? How much profit must you make?

I was reprimanded at a supermarket car park today for disregarding the store's one-way policy en route to an available parking space. At no risk, I hasten to add, to anybody or any vehicles. The car park attendant opted to bang on the side of my car to point my misdemeanour out. So, I parked up and went over for a chat with him. "Don't bang on my car like that," I chipped in first before he could bore me with the tedium of the store's car park policy. "You were going the wrong way." "I know. But I do have eyes and there was no danger of a collision. Please don't bang on my car like that. Ever. Again. And don't start telling me the rules of the car park. It's not a public highway and I note that I park here at my own risk. So if you're not liable for any damage that may happen to my car whilst I am shopping here then I refuse to obey your one-way system when my actions will most definitely not result in a collision with any other vehicle." "You people," he mumbled, "have an answer for everything." This confused me. What did he mean by "you people"? "What do you mean by 'you people'? Do you mean people that come here to shop? Have you had this kind of trouble before?" He didn't like this and told me that the next time I refused to obey the one way system in the car park he would telephone the police. I countered by telling him that the next time he attempted to vandalise my car I would telephone the police. He wasn't at his post when we returned to the car after buying a box of tea bags. I noticed that 50 per cent of the cars moving around the car park did so without heeding the direction the white arrows suggested they move in.