Guest Blogger: Ily Goyanes

Writers are often asked whether or not their characters and stories are based on their lives, on something real. Of course, all writing has some of the writer’s truth in it, but for the most part, many fiction writers write exactly that – fiction.

Like them, my characters and stories come from within – sprouting from an ethereal place and taking shape in my consciousness. There is one story however, that is 100% autobiographical (with a few minor tweaks to protect the not-so-innocent).

“Come to Me” in Best Lesbian Erotica 2012 is based on real people and real events. The main character is me (of course) and the story is mine, and I felt that it was such a good story that it needed telling. I was right.

It is a story about two women who engage in sweaty, steamy sex, to be sure, but it is so much more. It is about being a woman – and whatever that may or may not mean. It’s about self-discovery and love of self. But on the surface, it is about how I learned to masturbate.

Being a person of highly libidinous tendencies, it always kind of irked me that I could not get myself off. Through my teen years, whenever I tried, it was – just – no — good. Fortunately, I had plenty of sex, but still… there were times I just wanted to rub one out.

A few years ago, I met this blue-eyed American butch who taught me how to really love my self. She didn’t give me lessons per se (I know my way around a pussy), but rather she taught me that masturbation is not an act of sexual desperation to be indulged in only when you are lacking a dance partner, but rather, an act of self-love that can and should be engaged in whether you have a partner or not. She taught me that being my own lover, satisfying my self, and getting down and dirty with my own body, was fucking hot. She taught me how to get turned on by me.

Cory and I had a brief, albeit torrid love affair, that ended in a literal tragedy. Prior to her I had only been attracted to femmes, but as an added bonus, she taught me how scorching hot butches can be. She is gone now, but I learned more from being with her for a much-too-short six months than I learned from any other lover (including my wife of almost fifteen years). I will always treasure these lessons (in fact, I just may ‘treasure’ one of them right now).

Excerpt from “No, Tell Me How You Really Feel” from Girls Who Score: Hot Lesbian Erotica:

I sit high up in the bleachers waiting for the game to start, dressed in tight jeans, sneakers, and a hoodie emblazoned with the school’s crest pulled up over my head, obscuring my face. Yes, I have school spirit, but no one has to know about it. So, once a week during volleyball season, I don my “average person” disguise so I can attend the games without ruining my reputation with the coffee-house crowd.

The announcer starts calling out the names over the loudspeaker. This is my favorite part. “Number Twenty-Three and captain of the Lady Blue Jays, Julianne Murphy!”

She trots out of the hallway and into the gym/auditorium and stands there looking around. The bleachers are half empty, which is an improvement from previous games. I guess her efforts to engage the student body are working. She looks happy and I want to slap her. Doesn’t she realize that there is more to life than sports? More to life than just refining your, admittedly hot, body? What about cultivating your brain? I shake my head. Jocks don’t have brains, I remind myself. She dominates the court, spikes the ball into the faces of our enemies and brings home the win. I go home and rub my clit raw thinking about how much she annoys me.

Thanks for the information that I know as a new writer will come in handy. It is always good to know that there are others out there that are learning things about themselves so I don’t feel so stupid at my age not know things. I’m looking to read more of your writings and keeping your name on the list of authors to follow. Maybe I will also find that special woman that will teach me more about life and what it holds for us all.

I turned 38 years old today and I am still learning — I hope that continues to be the case.

I really appreciate you adding me to your list of authors to follow; I promise not to disappoint. 😉

There have been only a few special women in my life, but I’ve found that each one has taught me some invaluable life lessons. I hope to find the one that makes the effort to learn alongside me for a lifetime.

Happy Birthday but your still young at that age. I’m almost 16 years older and just finding out that I want to write for the rest of my life. So good luck with all your adventures and I also hope I will be publish someday when I’m good enough.

Thank you, hon. When I’ve been a guest on one of your sites, I always feel as if I have nothing to say — that is, until I sit at the computer! You’re like Barbara Walters! Thank God I didn’t cry though…

I’m SO excited about GIRLS WHO SCORE! You and so many other wonderful writers on there!

I’ve been watching the gymnastics also, and just being utterly fascinated with the way the gymnasts move, their visuals, the things they do. It’s amazing and baffling. They’re all so way way way too young, but so poised and beautiful and almost unreal. The aesthetics of the sport is something!

Maybe they need to put together another book like this and time it to come out with either the gay games in 2014 or the winter games? Just an idea to throw out there if anyone can get it sold to the publishers. LOL