HEATH BELL'S FIVE BEST

1. Carrying the water-balloon launcher to the top of the Western Metal building and firing at the ground crew.

2. Flying remote-control planes toward the roof of Minute Maid Park in Houston and Chase Field in Phoenix.

3. Riding Segways with Kevin Kouzmanoff at Petco Park and sliding them across the concourses.

4. Flicking sunflower seeds at security workers and fans from the bullpen at Petco Park.

5. Buzzing teammates with remote-control helicopters.

PEORIA, Ariz.  Heath Bell is a kid.

He knows it. He’s proud of it.

“I’m more a kid than an adult person,” he said recently. “My father once told me, ‘You’re as old as you feel, stay young.’ I’m a responsible 10-year-old.”

Bell is joking, of course … sort of.

All of which makes him something of a mystery man in the game of baseball.

“I’m not what I am on the field,” Bell said. “People around the league who don’t know me, see me differently — as this mean, intense, say-anything guy whose something of hardhead.”

Teammates view Bell as friendly, funny and sometimes too outspoken for his own good.

“C.Y. (Chris Young) and Eck (David Eckstein) are my filters,” joked Bell. “They’ve told me to be careful with what I say. Honestly, I probably should have them standing next to me when I’m talking.”

Bell says even his own family has its moments with him.

“My oldest daughter (Jasmyne) tells me, ‘Just because you’re an All-Star doesn’t make you cool,’ ” Bell said. “And my wife (Nicole) tells me that ‘you’re not that good … in three or four seasons you’ll be done.’ ”

Funny lines. Lines said with a big smile. But lines that drew notice from several nearby — and new to the Padres — teammates.

That’s Heath Bell.

Yes, he led the National League in saves last season (42). Yes, he was an All-Star last year. And, yes, he’s making $4 million this season.

Beyond that?

“I’m just a guy,” he said. “I love my family and kids. I love to do fun, and some would say funny, things. Biggest thing is, I’m just a fan. If I weren’t playing baseball, I’d be watching it.

“But I am playing baseball. So I’m going to play while being me. I say what I feel. I don’t have a filter. I talk sometimes like I’m still a kid. Some people take that as being cocky and arrogant. But I’m neither. I’m Heath Bell.”

And that might mean saying something outlandish.

Or, flying a remote-control helicopter into the rafters of the roof at Minute Maid Park in Houston.

Or, launching water balloons off the roof of the Western Metal Supply Co. building at Petco Park.

Or, riding a motorized beer cooler across the outfield grass at Petco.

Or, and this could be the kicker, taking his children to school while riding a motorized chair through the neighborhood.

“It’s great,” he said. “The parents who see us coming in that chair don’t see me as a ballplayer. They see me as the nut of a father in the motorized chair.”

Bell sees himself as being no different from a lot of young fathers.

“Baseball isn’t going to change some things. I drive a Nissan Altima because I like that old car. I like my old T-shirts. And I don’t like having to have clean shoes on.

“What baseball has done is give me the resources to do some things a lot of men would like to try.”

Like buying a water-balloon launcher, or a Segway, or a motorized beer cooler.

Don’t, however, mistake his fun-loving, outspoken nature as being a sign that he doesn’t take his profession and his team seriously.

On the first day of spring training, Bell was asked if the Padres might be able to contend for a playoff spot.

“We’re going to the World Series,” he responded. And he believes that. At least he says he believes that.

“Don’t you have to?” he said. “My agent (Sam Levinson) called me after reading that and he was doubting my words and I told him, ‘Talk bad about my guys and I’ll kick your …’

“I’m passionate about my guys and this team. Don’t ask me why, but I feel like we’re going to the World Series. Never doubt how far you can go.”

However, Bell knows some of the things he says are misconstrued by people, including rival players, who don’t know him.

After all, the 32-year-old has been a baseball name for only a year after working his first two seasons as a Padre as the obscure setup man for Trevor Hoffman.

So last year when he said, “I’m the man now,” it rankled Hoffman in Milwaukee although Bell says he meant no offense. “Sometimes, pitchers aren’t perfect with their deliveries,” he said.

“Once you know Heath and what he’s about, it’s funny and you can laugh with him,” said Young. “But a lot of guys don’t know him yet.”

Bell still remembers one of his first mutterings as a Padre.

It was spring 2007 and Bell, who came to San Diego via a trade with the Mets, was asked if he thought he had made the Opening Day roster.

“I said: ‘They traded for me, I must be on the team.’ ”

Oops.

“Doug Brocail came over and told me there were five other pitchers contending for that job,” remembers Bell.

And there was the quote last July when he was the losing pitcher in his first All-Star Game. “I said, ‘I had to do something to make it memorable.’ ”

Oops II.

Actually, there have been more than a few oopses. And he’s upset a few rivals, including Colorado closer Huston Street last season.

“I’ve learned a lesson to never name names or corporations,” Bell said. But he was smiling. Did he mean it?