May 31, 2006

Nathan is just too funny. I really hope he keeps that sense of humor..Fun people are great to be around..
So last week, one morning he came down for breakfast and told us that later he would marry Sarah. Sarah is a little QT he met at daycare 4 years ago. They're both nearly 5. Actually I think she fancies Maxim but I was not prepared to burst his bubble..LOL.
But I disgress..
I then said: oh..good..
To this, he turns to me and said very seriously: yes, you see, I get bigger, I must leave home, so then I marry Sarah..And she becomes my mama..
Smarty pants...You leave a mom, to find another one...I'm sure Sarah will be pleased to hear that!

May 30, 2006

I have had a difficult couple of days...It all seemed so simple, or maybe too simple..I resigned from my job officially a month ago after telling my boss in February....It was a tough decision and I can only whisper it out as it does not seem real yet. I have always worked, and pretty hard too. I work for a great company and they've treated me well, always. When I got back to work after Manouk was born, we had a rough 6 months. We decided against an au-pair, the boys started school, Manouk was sick EVERY week. I really got the feeling that I was compromising my kids for my self realisation and decided to quit. After all I had my photography that could keep me busy and I could even start my own business, work the hours I wanted and be more of a traditional mother. Yes, it seemed the right decision and so simple.
A month from my official leaving date, I am not so sure anymore. Will I be a better mother because I am at home? Will the kids be happier? Should I really stop? I like working, I like the challenge and the intellectual stimulation. I like being part of a team and its vision for the future. I really do.
I look at pictures like this one, and I love these kids, my kids. I really want the best for them. However I am not sure that staying at home will make me a better mother. Maybe organising better daycare so that they come short of nothing would be a better solution.

I love this picture and I have ordered it BIG. Both characters are shining through. Nathan cannot help himself, the smile is peeking through. Maxim is my wise-guy who can be so serious.

They are so much fun at the moment, soon to become 5, so witty, so curious, so best friends. I can listen forever about their conversation, laughing together. My boys.

May 29, 2006

I got this shot! It is a long time I have dreamed it, planned it, visualised it, exposed for it..All in my mind...One evening last week, we were early with bath and it just occured to me: GOOD light, CLEAN feet!!! I ran downstairs to grab my camera, set Manouk in the middle of her 2 big bros, lined up the feet, told them to stop moving. Yes right! How do you keep 30 toes from wiggling all over the place?
I opened up to 1.8 to keep my ss high enough to avoid the blur..These piggies have a mind of their own. They were not going to listen to me..Especially ME...I had 20 seconds, I shot 3 times and got this.
I'm in love with it. These feet..It's them. The colors...It's them. The coziness..It's them. I know one day, they'll use these feet to walk away from me, on their own path to their own future..But for now they're just happy waiving them at me.

May 18, 2006

I bought this bag in Quebec whilst visiting Canada in March. I met a photog friend there and she had just gotten one like that. It is small and perfect for me. I only use my camera and a couple of lenses and it all fits in nicely. Together with my whi-bal (which I still have to use effectively..sigh..CWB will get me depressed one day..).

So this bag has become my big purse... It goes virtually everwhere I go. And the kids have been told (and taught!)not come near... Have I failed in my mission??

My 2 devils...This is forbidden territory! Well I know that Maxim has something to do with this (the car) and Nathan too (the lizzard..spelling?)...

They should know better...They KNOW better..Just trying to push the boundaries, as 4.5 years old will do!! I think a litle talk is in order, wouldn't you think? The beauty of being a kid is the power of short-term memory loss. I hould try that at work and see if my boss buys it.

May 11, 2006

that count. I was driving home this evening with a pounding migraine, just wishing for one thing: put the kids to bed and lay on the sofa!! When I arrived home the boys were just getting out the bath upstairs with Jantine (the neighbour girl who watches after them after school). I walked over to the kitchen to start getting dinner ready and saw the most beautiful little flowers that the boys had picked for me, together with a little note:For our sweet mommy, flowers for you (and for everyone): papa, mama, Maxim ,Nathan, Manouk. Kisses from Maxim and Nathan.The sweetest thing! It just makes you forget about the long day in the office in a split second..And it's not even mother's day! Which I explained to them tonight. They asked whether I would give a big party..I said, no, only sleeping out would be nice!!! LOL. Not only the flowers, but I found their clothes neatly folded on the bed, rather than scattered all over the floor...I had to capture this..

May 01, 2006

This is Nathan, very much a middle child syndrome sufferer, although he's a twin but second born. So technically yes a middle child. Forever misunderstood..If that saying is true (the eyes are the window to the soul), it applies to him so beautifully. He is the one child I find difficult to reach to sometimes. So special, so funny, surprising me all the times...So curious about life..Will be living it to the max, that's a fact! He's a child that could be a stand-up comedian, making you laugh all day long..But this picture is the way he feels to me...He truly inspires me..