You are trapped on a desert island with the Spice Girls. Food and rum have run out. Which Spice Girl do you eat first?

The Ginger Spice

The Sporty Spice

The Tall Spice

The Relatively Posh Spice

The Baby Spice

Free polls from Pollhost.com

Chase me, ladies, I'm in the cavalry

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

It just occurred to me that I could drop dead and it would be several months before anyone noticed. A few people would say, “Where’s that tosser?” then they’d shrug and go back to captioning cats on the internet. Probably the gas company would be the first to realise I had croaked, when they came round to cut me off.

The neighbours would continue to play their hideous pop music as I lay rotting a few yards away. What a barbarous age!