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if I cry, run [poem]

they say that love means being there to witness
the laughter and the tears
but know this
I express my pain in
careful keystrokes and clever syntax
I can hand you poetry and prose to fill a library
with my hurts and happiness
you can read my heart in my words
nothing hidden or buried in my open honesty
but I do not simply cry
so if you’re seeing me red eyed and sobbing
it is no gift
no sign of trust
my tears are no cleansing rain
no holy water salvation
granting you entry into my inner temple
they are hurt
they are hurt
they are gut wrenching pain
if you see me cry
you are watching a disaster in action
you’re just an innocent bystander at ground zero
my tears the toxic fallout
after an atomic bomb hits my heart dead center
it leaves my feelings raw and radioactive
too dangerous for anyone to touch
if you witness my destruction
I strongly suggest
you run