Meta

Mothers Who Know and What Women Know

I am just a little behind on this issue. In fact I didn’t even know it was an issue until Carol mentioned it the other day. She belongs to a Relief Society email newsgroup where the subject was being discussed. Apparently, a number of sisters took offense at the wonderful recent general conference address by Sister Julie B Beck, General President of the Relief Society.

I had to go back and read it again to see what all the fuss was about. The address is entitled ‘Mothers Who Know.” I suppose the main thing that some women took offense at is they felt excluded because they weren’t mothers. I don’t think Sister Beck intended to exclude women who weren’t mothers from her conference address.

In fact, just the week before she gave an equally wonderful address at the women’s broadcast. The subject there was “What Latter-day Saint Women Do Best: Stand Strong and Immovable.” Nobody complained about that talk with her three-part focus on faith, families and relief. I guess it was just that her General Conference talk focused so much on mothering.

Some sisters felt so strongly about what she said that they have actually written a dissenting document and posted it on the Internet. I won’t link to it. You can find it if you want. It is entitled, “What Women Know.” They apparently took offense to Sister Beck starting her talk with a reference to the 2,000 stripling warriors by pointing out how bad war is.

Update: I am so glad to see that enough sisters feel so strongly about this subject that they created their own website entitled, “Mothers Who Know.” I am happy to link to it here.

If you have found and read the opposing statement you may appreciate that the introduction points out that Sister Beck’s talk “conflicts with their inspiration and experience.” When I read that 2 Ne 9:28 came to my mind. I won’t comment on all the other parts of their dissertation but I will comment on two phrases that speak volumes.

One phrase is that too many of these women fear that they “are just one fully-employed male away from poverty.” Huh? Where did that come from and what does it have to do with Sister Beck’s talk? These women seem to be coming from a fear-based and not a faith-based point of view. The church has never taught that women should not excel in education or employability.

The other phrase I find disturbing is that they claim that many of their men “also struggle within a system that equates leadership with hierarchy and domination.” True, the priesthood organization of the Church is hierarchical, but that is from revealed doctrine. Domination is a different story and has forever been preached against as long as I can remember.

I wonder what my mother would have thought of this talk if she were still alive. My mother raised four daughters and two sons. She was an extremely well-read and educated woman. Would she have taken offense at Sister Beck’s reminder to bring children to church “in clean and ironed dresses with hair brushed to perfection?” I’ll have to ask my sisters.

What did you think of Sister Beck’s talk in General Conference? Was it demeaning or offensive or did you find it uplifting and encouraging?

Like this:

Related

Post navigation

4 comments for “Mothers Who Know and What Women Know”

The Farr's

November 28, 2007 at 1:11 am

I loved Sister Beck’s talk. I am a stay at home mom to my 4 young sons and I work in Primary, so I found her talk uplifting and very encouraging. I know a few people who were offended by her talk. But, I think overall, it was beautiful and inspired. Our Church has an amazing view of women that few people (outside of our Church) really understand. I feel empowered by my role as a wife and mother in the latter days. Sister Beck’s talk gave me hope and direction.

Years ago the prophet said point blank that women should stay home and rear their children. I struggled with this statement for a long time. At the time, I did not have any children but I struggled nevertheless. After much prayer I found that this did not fit into what my Heavenly Father planned for me. I continued on the path that I was following. Today, I am a teacher at my children’s school. I have the opportunity to spend more time with them than if I were a stay at home mom. We go together, we come home together, we are extremely close. I know all their friends and am acutely aware of their individual struggles and needs. I am all the things that Sister Beck said and more. (Well we won’t discuss the state of the living room six days a week.) This is what was right for my family. When my children were very small my husband was the primary caretaker while he attended school and I worked full-time. This was also a good choice for our family. The only reason this has worked despite the obvious non-traditional choices is because we put the Lord first in all things. Our first priority was first what is best for our children, not what our friends would say. We all have our own needs and the Lord knows each of us. What those mother’s knew is to trust in the Lord no matter what. Amen Sis. Beck

Traditional mothers are often less valued in today’s society. I really don’t think our nation is as progressive as some people think. I say that because progress should mean each generation is more diligent serving the Lord than the last. This, unfortunately, is not what we find today.

The next generation often suffers if mothers are distracted by worldly values instead of holding strong Christian values. When I think of the story of the stripling warriors, I remember how those young Lamanites trusted completely in the Lord to ensure their safety if they were valiant in the cause of righteousness … just as their mothers taught them.

It’s true that today’s culture values Christian child-rearing less than it did at other times, and our society has deteriorated as a result. I’ve seen more than one family suffer from a parent’s seeking for “individual fulfillment” in avenues incompatible with rearing a family.

That said, you can go the wrong direction even when you think you’re investing your all in the family. You might suffer from excessive busy-ness. LDS mothers can seem endlessly busy, often without good results. The kids, apparently, have to be in every extra-curricular activity in existence, and be hurried about on a hectic schedule that makes the moms little more than taxi drivers.

I like the advice from the talk that mothers should “allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home.” My feeling is that most of these inane activities children engage in should be tossed out while ways of seeking out and becoming closer with the Lord should be put in their places.

Sorry. I’m not one for thinking a vital part of a child’s upbringing is technology. There need to be fewer iPods and video games and more scripture study, if you ask me.

How to reach me for private chat:

tmalonemcse @ gmail.com

Depending on my workload, it can sometimes take a few days to get to your email. I read them all, even if I don't always respond. Thanks to all for reading and sharing.

I am often overwhelmed with private emails after I post something new. If you want to chat on the phone, I will be happy to do so. Shoot me an email with your number and I'll give you a call. Or call me (text first). Let's talk.

Sorted Blogroll

Ask to Join Our Facebook Group

My Facebook Page

My Linked-In Profile

About.me

I’m a California native. I grew up in the San Gabriel Valley in the sixties with a brother and four sisters. I’m the youngest in my family. Dad worked in retail grocery stores and mother taught in local elementary schools there. I played drums in the band during my school years. I graduated from Covina High School in 1974 and received a vocational training certificate in computer programming the same year. I later earned an Associate degree from the California Community College system (Mt SAC) and began my career in computer programming, sales and support.

I have been working with computer technology for over thirty years. I started as a programmer on the larger computers and then embraced personal computers when they came out. I worked in retail computer sales, then software distribution and later became a certified network engineer. My specialty is Microsoft systems in the Small and Medium Business market. I am currently the IT Director for a private corporate jet management company located at the Burbank Bob Hope airport. With modern technology, I am able to do a large part of my job working from home.

I am married with one adult son. Until recently, I was very active in my local community church. I spent two years in Central America as a missionary. I enjoy reading, research, writing, correspondence and have a special interest in changing natural events. You can find me online every day on various internet communities and blogs, especially on religious blogs. I am a blogger and write about issues that confront Mormonism. My faith in Christ is a big influence in my life.

My philosophy of life is centered on the idea of divine revelation as a source of knowledge. Yet I am a rationalist in that I embrace reasoning as an important part of deciding truth. But I am also an empiricist because I believe the same steps I take to obtain knowledge can be followed by others and should produce the same or similar results. I am not a skeptic. I am convinced that true knowledge is not only possible but is our divine right. I am not an existentialist. I do not believe that truth is subjective. I am a pragmatist. I look for truth in shared human experience

My Gravatar Profile

Tim is a computer technology professional providing desktop support, network administration and systems management in the Small and Medium Business market. He is currently the IT Director for a private corporate jet management company located at the Burbank Bob Hope airport. He began his career as a programmer but switched to tech support many years ago. Tim is married, has one adult son, and, until recently, was very active in his local community church. He spent two years in Central America as a missionary. He enjoys reading, research, writing, correspondence and has a special interest in alternative medicine. You can find him online every day on various internet communities and blogs, especially in the tech area. He maintains three blogs online, one on technology, one on current events and one on health research.

Personal Links

Verified Services

Now I have email questions about priesthood. Before setting this aside for more important things, let me add only: Priesthood has never been confined to one individual. Remember that from Adam to Enoch there were seven living generations with many unnamed priests. Every righteous son of the family of Adam held the priesthood. He led+ […]

I got this email asking for clarifications: Can you clarify these statements? Here Denver seems to be saying we can obtain salvation now. “You’re hedging up the way of your own salvation, and of the salvation of others when you say no one has the privilege in our day yet, to lay hold on salvation. You’re+ […]

It is impossible to re-establish the earliest form of the Gospel of Christ with its associated teachings, rites, ordinances, covenants and organization if we insist it fit into our current prejudices. We think so many things are necessary that are not, and we think many necessary things cannot possibly be required. In the beginning, the+ […]

The original Gospel taught from Adam down to Enoch has not been recovered. Joseph Smith was working backward in restoring the earliest teaching, scripture, covenants and ordinances as part of his brief ministry. That ended abruptly with his death. The future of the Gospel will return us to the original body of information, covenants and ordinances+ […]

This was on the board while I gave the talk on Plural Marriage. When I referred to the diagram from the Millennial Star I was referring to the right side of the diagram. If you click on the board picture, it should enlarge.