Not All Black and White

Often when I have made a mistake, or rather thought I have, it feels like it is the end. No grey area. I messed up or I didn’t. Being a perfectionist doesn’t often help matters either. But recently I am finding the beauty in my thought to be “misfortunes”.

We’ve all heard, in one form or another, that you learn from your mistakes. But in the moment, you honestly wish you had known this or that to keep you from making the “whoops” in the first place. But not all mistakes are so firmly on one side of the fence or the other. Good or bad. Often times I feel that most mistakes often sit right in the middle.(Je suis dessole, last weekend’s drunk text rant to your ex doesn’t count in this. You did it. That was all bad).

As it is now March, you may or may not have achieved or even started what you intended to for 2018 yet. You may be questioning where you “messed up” or went wrong so far. Or maybe it’s bigger than that. Maybe you might be questioning your career choice or a relationship and wondering again, “did I eff up somewhere?” because said issue isn’t going the way you planned. Truth is, you might have done everything “right” or you may have made a “mistake”. But think about it, how will you know? You can’t to be honest. This is a fact that annoys me most about making mistakes.

Personally, when something is going wrong, I often blame myself and then try to pinpoint the exact moment when I “effed up”. That normally leads to me stressing out completely over the situation for hours. Anyone else? It could be something as simple as saying something I wish I could take back to a friend or wishing that you had said something different in a conversation . The truth is we are all human. We all make mistakes. The person you idolize most in this world makes mistakes. Nobody does everything perfect at all times. NOBODY. No matter what people’s Instagram feeds would have you believe.

I am coming to realize that making mistakes is a good thing. I mean, don’t do something foolish on purpose, but an honest mistake really can teach you loads. In my experience, it can also help you help others too. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Often times the worst mistakes can leave you with the best stories to laugh about later.

Here are some tips to help you move on the next time you slip up:

Breathe, your fine.

If the problem can be immediately fixed, do so.

If not, let it go and own it.

Note how you can avoid the mistake from happening again in future.

Find the Gin

Find the Tonic

Pour both into glass over ice

If you don’t or can’t drink, a cup of Earl Grey does the trick just fine too and just skip steps 5-7.