About Claire

TAKE EVERYTHING WITH A PINCH OF SALT –
All writing is my own – unless it is not – then – It’s someone else’s !!

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.

IF YOU CAN MAKE A WOMAN LAUGH – YOU CAN MAKE HER DO ANYTHING nearly !!

I’m gonna be very needy, very honest, very open, and OMG I NEVER SHUT UP – I do lurve a chat- i can be NAUGHTY AS HELL ( if your in the know – im a switch but more sub to the right guy ! ) – But thats not for conversation immediately !

Ohh I can make a mean Lasagne – LMAO – But – Thats about it – The Fire Alarm is the dinner bell in my house !!

NOW I HAVE GOT YOUR ATTENTION !!

IF YOUR HOT, SEXY, TALL AND A GENUINE MAN’S MAN – This is Sooooooooooooooo for you !!!
TOTALLY FED UP OF TIME WASTERS ! – SO BEWARE !

If you like what you see – and can handle DECENT FUN GENUINE conversation and YOUR NOT GWUMPY, PERVY, TOOO HORNY, OR A PLAYER
GET IN TOUCH – OK – May sound Loony – BUT – I’m not – My psych said so !! –

Ohh i do have a Unicorn – YES – His name is Dave and he is always with me ( Although he is his own person ) – and YES – i can prove it – so – still not a fruit loop – Just friendly ( NOT IN THAT WAY – BEHAVE ! ) AND FUN – OHH I DO HAVE AN ILLNESS THO – It’s OK – YOU can’t catch it – But – pmsl – well it does scare people – so – if you are easily scared – i’m NOT for you ! –
Don’t worry – i dont have a third leg or a willy or an eye at the back of my head !! – But – it does require UNDERSTANDING and a certain amount of intelligence ! oh and a calming environment some of the time !! NO STRAIGHT JACKET REQUIRED THOUGH !!

PHOTOS – NO COCKS PLEASE – IM BRITISH !
WHY NO SMILES ??? MEN – SMILE – FFS !!!
Or middle fingers ? – why swear at camera – D’OH !
OR Fish – If you have a photo with a Fish
I’m Not Interested –
FISH ARE SMELLY – NOT SEXY !!

God – am i that fussy !!

hell yeah – and i’m worth it !! – * shakes head * as per Loreal Advert – Just wish i had hair 😉 !!!

OHHHH COFFEE DRINKERS ONLY – lololol – No – I am TOTALLY SERIOUS !! –
Tea drinkers are NOT TO BE TRUSTED !
You can never be toooooo vigilant where a tea drinker is concerned ! ….