Jonah Hill, 2X Oscar nominee and friend of Marty, Leo, and Brange, was nominated for his 2nd Oscar yesterday. Then he got to sit with Marty and Leo at the Critics’ Choice Awards and Leo even namechecked him in his speech! Best day ever!

This is why Jonah Hill, 2X Oscar nominee and friend of Marty, Leo, and Brange, doesn’t want to be funny in interviews and insists he be taken seriously as a “serious” actor. This is why Jonah Hill, 2X Oscar nominee and friend of Marty, Leo, and Brange, wants you to know that:

“You can dis me all you want on a blog, or write whatever you want in this magazine and I’ll just be like, ‘Whatever, man. Scorsese thinks I’m awesome.’ [Laughs.] He hired me and didn’t fire me, so I can kind of not care now. It really did give me personal assurance that I’m doing the right thing and that I’m talented in certain ways because he’s so important to me.”

With Leo sitting beside him and beaming at him from the stage, Jonah has everything. Jonah is completely actualised. I wonder if at this point he’d rather see Leo winning than himself. Isn’t that what you want for the people you love? You’d rather their happiness over your own?

Leo won for Best Comedic Actor. I really hope he does something with his hair before the Oscars because right now, it’s not working. Especially not at the back. It’s one-length at the back now. And it pushes off his neck like a wig. You know why? Because he’s making up for the slow recession by letting it long at the back, like somehow that balances it out. Look at him and admit it. If he wasn’t LEONARDO DICAPRIO, he’d be the skeezy asshole trying to pick you up at the hotel bar in the airport Holiday Inn.