Baking for the Wicked

Mama’s New Year Hangover Cure

HAPPY NEW YEAR darlings! If your ears are still ringing from ringing in the New Year, fear not, my belovèds, for there is a balm in this devil’s kitchen!

Way back when I was wet behind the ears, my mama used to make me her special scrambled eggs. I would sit at the table, my skinny legs dangling, and eat with my fork upside down. Little did I know that this magical recipe would be my best friend for those horrible hangovers in college, when I would drag my sorry ass home at 5am Sunday morning, praying for my swift demise.

This year, Mr. S and I shared a champagne toast while watching fireworks from the balcony, and I just have to brag a little here- I have the bravest doggie in the whole wide world. While everyone else’s pooches were trembling under beds, 4 kilo Maggie refused to leave my side during the 20+ minutes of fireworks. I even tried to shoo her inside, but no, she wanted to watch the fireworks with mama. Or perhaps, she figured it was the apocalypse, and we might as well all go together.

Anyway, your poor heads are probably aching, so here is the recipe:

MAMA’S NEW YEAR HANGOVER CURE

For the eggs:

2 eggs, beaten

1/2 cup cottage cheese

butter

salt and pepper to taste

Optional: veggies (if you feel up to it- I used peppers in the photo above)

First things first, you need to combine your élixer ingredients in a glass, stirring with a spoon, and take your 4 pills. Once you have done that, take out two pans, and melt a little butter in both. Over medium-high heat, cook your eggs, folding the cottage cheese in, and adding your seasonings and veggies if you can stomach veggies. Cook for 5-10 minutes, depending on how you like your eggs. I like them a little harder than most people, and the longer you cook them, the more likely the cottage cheese is to let out some liquid. If that happens, don’t be afraid, it won’t hurt you, and it doesn’t taste bad.

Meanwhile, heat your other pan to medium-high as well, and toast your bread in the pan. My mother swears by this method, it is very easy on the tumtum. If you have bagels, that is even better. Once your toast is done to your liking, and the eggs are ready, melt a little cheese into the eggs.

Buttered toasted breads and eggs are really the best for hangovers. Bread to soak up all that poison, the oil to soften the blow, and eggs have magical power enzymes that fix everything. If you are vegan, then just try pan frying a bagel in a little oil and salt.