Why Willpower Isn’t the Key to Losing Weight

When you’re frustrated that you can’t seem to stick to a weight-loss plan, it’s easiest to blame a lack of willpower for your struggle. After all, losing weight would be a cinch if you could just say no to cookies and make it to the gym six days a week, right? Wrong. Depending on determination to get you through soda cravings and laziness is probably going to end in defeat. Here, experts explain why this mindset doesn't help you get to your goal weight and how you can work with your brain instead of against it to drop pounds.

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Here's the thing: When you invoke that impressive self-control by eating what you think you should have instead of what you want, it’s a little harder to make subsequent good choices because of something called ‘decision fatigue,' says Albers.

While a resolution to lose weight requires you to think about what you should and shouldn't be putting in your mouth, mindful eating is about accepting that you're human, concentrating on what you want to eat, and enjoying every bite, says Albers. “Mindfulness isn’t about playing tug of war with your appetite and cravings,” says Albers. "You need to work with your cravings by responding to them and figuring out how you can work your favorite foods into a healthy lifestyle."

For example, keeping yourself from chocolate for months is an exercise in willpower that’s destined to fail and, one day, leave you in a cocoa-stuffed haze. But if you come to terms with the fact that you need chocolate to stay sane and know that indulging in too much can keep you from your goals, you can figure out a way to incorporate chocolate into your life, she says. “Stop telling yourself, ‘No, I can’t eat that,’ and starting asking yourself how you can eat it in a mindful way,” says Albers.

Are you downing smoothies and pumping iron because you love how it feels to be healthy or because you think that you have to look a certain way? While there’s nothing wrong with wanting to get in great shape, Segar says that kind of extrinsic motivation is not the best fuel for achieving your weight-loss goals. “Research shows when you decide to work out more or eat healthier for your own wellbeing, you'll feel motivated for a longer period of time,” says Segar. Feeling like you “should” do something so you can look hotter is almost guaranteed to zap your ambition.

When you exercise or eat in a way that doesn’t make your body feel good, like always doing hardcore cardio classes solely to burn as many calories as possible, you might start to see being healthy as a chore, says Segar. Instead, start thinking about what makes your body feel best, even if it’s going for a long walk instead of strapping into an indoor-cycling bike.

When you think of eating well and exercising as something you do for yourself, it keeps you pumped to make the right choices for your body and can also help you cement healthy habits, which can help you lose weight and maintain your new size in the long run.

A big event on the horizon—like that wedding your ex will also be attending—is enough to make you hit the gym hard and cut back on what you eat. But that wobbly reasoning probably won't last. “Your brain is wired to go after the quickest reward because a long-term incentive isn’t always guaranteed,” says Albers. So when you have to choose between eating a doughnut now or abstaining so you can potentially look better in a few months, chances are you’ll end up with sticky fingers and disappointment.

That’s why experts advocate focusing on the short-term rewards of healthy eating and exercising. “Focusing on the now is much more successful than trying to convince yourself you’ll lose weight sometime in the future,” says Albers. For example, if you skip the doughnut, your reward is avoiding the post-sugar-rush crash.

That short-term thought process works for exercise, too. Maybe you love the mood boost you get each time you leave yoga or that fact that the gym is the only place you'll see your crazy-busy bestie. Whatever it may be, thinking of the immediate rewards each time you do something healthy can prime your mind and body to do it again.

It’s three in the afternoon, and your stomach’s grumbling. Are you going to go for an apple and some almond butter, or will you turn to the vending machine? Decision fatigue may lead you to the latter, but when eating well is a part of your routine, your brain makes healthy decisions on autopilot, says Albers. That helps conserve your energy for making more body-benefitting decisions. She suggests meal prepping every Sunday and keeping delicious, satiating snacks on-hand throughout the day to help make eating weight-loss friendly foods second nature.

When you get a huge surge of motivation to start living healthier, it’s easy to think you can overhaul your lifestyle for maximum results in minimal time. And when that inspiration inevitably fails, you might feel like it's impossible to shed pounds—but you shouldn't. “We often call on willpower when something is above and beyond what we’re truly able to do,” says Segar. The fix here is to set smaller, more achievable goals for yourself, like working out three days a week instead of committing to six. “When you’re more realistic, you’re more successful,” says Albers. “That’s a win-win that can help keep you motivated.”

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