Rants about Life, Politics, Stupid People, and anything else that just trips my trigger. If you are offended by bad words and someone else's opinion based on whatever info is available, maybe this isn't the place to visit. If not, come on in, tie up, grab a beer and stay awhile. Comments are welcome, Really. Living Life Through the Windshield!

Monday, November 28, 2005

If you consider that there have been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theater of operations during the last 22 months, and a total of 2112 deaths, that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000.

The rate in Washington D.C. (among others) is 80.6 per 100,000. That means that you are about 25% more likely to be shot and killed in our Nation's Capitol, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation, than you are in Iraq.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Kinda naughty in sport but pretty funny. ???>>Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?>A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again. >>Q. What's a mixed feeling?>A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.>>Q. What's the height of conceit?>A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name. >>Q. What's the definition of macho?>A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.>>Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?>A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball. >>Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?>A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick.>>Q.Why is divorce so expensive?>A Because it's worth it.> >Q. What is a Yankee?>A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.>>Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?>A. They both like a tight seal.>>Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common? >A. Their balls are just for decoration>>Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and "aaaaaaah"?>A. About three inches.>>Q. Why do Gay men wear ribbed condoms? >A. For traction in the mud.>>Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?>A. The grip.>>Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?>A. It's not hard.> >Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?>A: Kick his sister in the jaw.>>Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?>A: 45 pounds.>>Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? >A: 45 minutes.>>Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?>A: Breasts don't have eyes.>>Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?>A. The swallow. >>Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?>A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.>>Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?>A. They don't have balls to scratch

Friday, November 18, 2005

The other day, my nine year old son wanted to know why we were at war...My husband looked at our son and then looked at me. My husband and I were in the Army during the Gulf War and we would be honored to serve and defend our Country again today. I knew that my husband would give him a good explanation. My husband thought for a few minutes and then told my son to go stand in our front living room window

He said "Son, stand there and tell me what you see?"

"I see trees and cars and our neighbor's houses." he replied.

"OK, now I want you to pretend that our house and our yard is the United States of America and you are President Bush."

Our son giggled and said "OK."

"Now son, I want you to look out the window and pretend that every house and yard on this block is a different country" my husband said.

"OK Dad, I'm pretending."

"Now I want you to stand there and look out the window and pretend you see Saddam coming out of his house with his wife, he has her by the hair and is hitting her. You see her bleeding and crying. He hits her in the face, he throws her on the ground, then he starts to kick her to death. Their children run out and are afraid to stop him, they are screaming and crying, they are watching this but do nothing because they are kids and they are afraid of their father. You see all of this, son....what do you do?"

"Dad?"

"What do you do son?"

"I'd call the police, Dad."

"OK. Pretend that the police are the United Nations. They take your call. They listen to what you know and saw but they refuse to help. What do you do then son?"

"Dad.......... but the police are supposed to help!" My son starts to whine.

"They don't want to son, because they say that it is not their place or your place to get involved and that you should stay out of it," my husband says.

"But Dad...he killed her!!" my son exclaims.

"I know he did...but the police tell you to stay out of it. Now I want you to look out that window and pretend you see our neighbor who you're pretending is Saddam turn around and do the same thing to his children."

"Daddy...he kills them?"

"Yes son, he does. What do you do?"

"Well, if the police don't want to help, I will go and ask my next door neighbor to help me stop him." our son says.

"Son, our next door neighbor sees what is happening and refuses to get involved as well. He refuses to open the door and help you stop him," my husband says.

"But Dad, I NEED help!!! I can't stop him by myself!!"

"WHAT DO YOU DO SON?" Our son starts to cry.

"OK, no one wants to help you, the man across the street saw you ask for help and saw that no one would help you stop him. He stands taller and puffs out his chest. Guess what he does next son?"

"What Daddy?"

"He walks across the street to the old ladies house and breaks down her door and drags her out, steals all her stuff and sets her house on fire and then..he kills her. He turns around and sees you standing in the window and laughs at you. WHAT DO YOU DO?"

"Daddy..."

"WHAT DO YOU DO?" Our son is crying and he looks down and he whispers, "I'd close the blinds, Daddy."

My husband looks at our son with tears in his eyes and asks him. "Why?"

"Because Daddy.....the police are supposed to help people who needs them...and they won't help... You always say that neighbors are supposed to HELP neighbors, but they won't help either...they won't help me stop him...I'm afraid....I can't do it by myself Daddy.....I can't look out my window and just watch him do all these terrible things and...and.....do nothing...so....I'm just going to close the blinds.... so I can't see what he's doing........and I'm going to pretend that it is not happening."

I start to cry My husband looks at our nine year old son standing in the window, looking pitiful and ashamed at his answers to my husband's questions and he says...

"Son"

"Yes, Daddy."

"Open the blinds because that man.... he's at your front door... "WHAT DO YOU DO?"

My son looks at his father, anger and defiance in his eyes. He balls up his tiny fists and looks his father square in the eyes, without hesitation he says: "I DEFEND MY FAMILY DAD!! I'M NOT GONNA LET HIM HURT MOMMY OR MY SISTER, DAD!!! I'M GONNA FIGHT HIM, DAD, I'M GONNA FIGHT HIM!!!!!"

I see a tear roll down my husband's cheek and he grabs our son to his chest and hugs him tight, and says... "It's too late to fight him, he's too strong and he's already at YOUR front door son.....you should have stopped him BEFORE he killed his wife, and his children and the old lady across the way. You have to do what's right, even if you have to do it alone, before its too late." my husband whispers. THAT scenario I just gave you is WHY we are at war with Iraq. When good men stand by and let evil happen son, THAT is the greatest atrocities in the world won't affect him. "YOU MUST NEVER BE AFRAID TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT! EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO DO IT ALONE!" BE PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN! BE PROUD OF OUR TROOPS!! SUPPORT THEM!!! SUPPORT AMERICA SO THAT IN THE FUTURE OUR CHILDREN WILL NEVER HAVE TO CLOSE THEIR BLINDS..."

This should be printed in every newspaper and posted in every school in America. Of course that won't happen so we'll use the Internet. If your blinds are closed do nothing with this email. If they are open I do not need to tell you what to do.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

And for those of us who thought only our prisons were filled with the idiots . Once an American Shyster or maybe Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton gets a hold of this, God may be the only one to be able to help us.

JB

Romanian prisoner sues God

13:06

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18/ 10/ 2005

ATHENS, October 18 (RIA Novosti) - A prisoner in a Romanian jail is suing God, Greek state television reported from Bucharest Tuesday.

"God received different material valuables from me, as well as prayers in exchange for promises of a better life. In reality, this did not happen - I found myself in the devil's hands," the plaintiff said.

The convict is serving 20 years in the west Romanian city of Timisoara. He apparently blames God for the troubles in his life and wants God brought to account for failing to fulfill the commitments He undertook and for taking bribes.

The plaintiff said that when he had been baptized in childhood, he concluded a contract with God that had legal effect - God was supposed to protect him from evil.

The plaintiff said the Romanian Orthodox Church, which, according to him, directly represents God, should compensate him for the alleged God-inflicted damage.

In line with the law, the lawsuit was submitted to court. However, as the defendant is neither an individual nor a company, and is not subject to a civil court of law's jurisdiction, the case is unlikely to be heard regardless of how justified the plaintiff's demands may be, court officials said.

President Bush has authorized the Joint Chiefs to begin drawing up a battle plan to pull France out of the fire again. Facing an apparent overwhelming force of up to 400 pissed off teenagers Mr. Bush doubts France's ability to hold off the little piss-ants. "If the last two world wars are any indication, I would expect France to surrender any day now", said Bush.

Joint Chiefs head, Gen. Peter Pace, warned the President that it might be necessary to send up to 5 marines to get things under control. The general admitted that 5 marines may be overkill but he wanted to get this thing under control within 24 hours of arriving on scene. He stated he was having a hard time finding even one marine to volunteer to help the ungrateful French out for a third time but thought that he could persuade a few women marines to do the job before they went on pregnancy leave.

President Bush asked Gen. Pace to get our marines out of there as soon as possible after order was restored. He also reminded Gen. Pace to make sure the marines did not take soap, razors, or deodorant with them. The less they stand out the better.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Mark, my good friend in Chesapeake sent this to me and I have to agree with him.

SHALL WE HIRE A MONUMENT ENGRAVER TO GO TO ARLINGTON NATIONAL CEMETERY AND ADD THE MISSING WORDS ?

A MESSAGE FROM AN APPALLED OBSERVER:

Today I went to visit the new World War II Memorial in Washington, DC. I got an unexpected history lesson. Because I'm a baby boomer, I was one of the youngest in the crowd. Most were the age of my parents, veterans of "the greatest war," with their families. It was a beautiful day, and people were smiling and happy to be there. Hundreds of us milled around the memorial, reading the inspiring words of Eisenhower and Truman that are engraved there.

On the Pacific side of the memorial, a group of us gathered to read the words President Roosevelt used to announce the attack on Pearl Harbor:

"Yesterday, December 7, 1941-- a date which will live in infamy--the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked. "

One elderly woman read the words aloud:

"With confidence in our armed forces, with the unbounding determination of our people, we will gain the inevitable triumph. "

But as she read, she was suddenly turned angry "Wait a minute," she said, "they left out the end of the quote. They left out the most important part. Roosevelt ended the message with "so help us God.'"

Her husband said, "You are probably right. We're not supposed to say things like that now."

Listening to their conversation, I thought to myself, "Well, it has been over 50 years. She's probably forgotten."

But she had not forgotten. She was right.

I went home and pulled out the book my book club is reading --- "Flags of Our Fathers" by James Bradley. It's all about the battle at Iwo Jima I haven't gotten too far in the book. It's tough to read because it's a graphic description of the WWII battles in the Pacific.

But right there it was on page 58. Roosevelt's speech to the nation ends in "so help us God."

The people who edited out that part of the speech when they engraved it on the memorial could have fooled me. I was born after the war. But they couldn't fool the people who were there. Roosevelt's words are engraved on their hearts.

Now I ask: "WHO GAVE THEM THE RIGHT TO CHANGE THE WORDS OF HISTORY?"

Send this around to your friends. People need to know before everyone forgets. People today are trying to change the history of America by leaving God out of it, but the truth is, God has been a part of this nation, since the beginning. He still wants to be...and He always will be!