My kids are pizza bagels. Half Jewish and half Italian (Catholic), they are brought up with the traditions of both religions. My husband was brought up to go into debt every Christmas and that Santa gets the kids everything on their list. Unfortunately, that traditions has continued here. (More on that tomorrow.)
I have always loved Christmas. I'm Jewish, and was not brought up with a Hanukkah bush or anything like that. We had a menorah. Period. But my dad and I would go for a ride and look at the lights every year. I loved that. I must say though, I was jealous of all of the families with their sparkly decorations and always wanted that.
I met my now-husband at Christmas. I went to … [Read more...]

I'm not advocating egging or toilet papering someone's house on Halloween, but if anyone deserves it, it's the bitch who hands out this note instead of candy, a toy, pretzels, or even nothing on Halloween.
FUCK HER. It takes a village my ass. Butt out of Halloween, whore! Geez, it is one day a year, let the kids get their candy in a tradition that's been around since she was a kid.
I bet she didn't even need to wear that witch costume. … [Read more...]

I'm not stupid. I graduated college with a 3.98. But that was a LONG time ago. All that knowledge has disappeared into a cloud of pot smoke. Seriously, when I substitute teach, I won't even teach 6th grade math. Ugh, math. I hated it then, I hate it even more now. I may know more about life than my son, but I have to admit, he knows more about a LOT of stuff compared to me.
He is in 11th grade and taking 3 AP courses (he has already taken two) and is in all advanced classes. He is busy learning every day, while I'm reading dirty books and spending my day on Facebook and twitter. So yeah, at this point, the fucker is smarter than me, at least book wise. But there is the key word … [Read more...]

Starting on Monday is my motto with everything, not just dieting. I'm the queen of procrastination. I work way better under pressure, which is why I tend to write best after midnight when I want my post up the next morning.
I'm also a bit of a slob and a pack rat. I have a cleaning lady once a week, and she just shoves my stuff wherever she can so she can clean beneath it. My bathroom counter is full. But I can't clean that up until I make room in my drawers and under the sink. Right now my drawers get stuck when I open them, and things fall on my toes when I open the cabinet under my sink.
But when I start cleaning, I make it worse. I start emptying drawers to clean them...then I get … [Read more...]

I'm not sure if it's Spanx to the rescue or I need a rescue from my Spanx!
My kids were playing (they're in a band) at a safari themed fundraiser the other night. It was at a fancy golf and country club, so I knew I had to dress up. Sadly, I looked in my ridiculously-overfilled-with-clothes-I-don't-wear walk-in closet and I don't own one single thing with animal print. (90% of my closet is black, grey or purple) So I went with one of my standby black maxi dresses.
It's been a while since I dressed up. I'm in Florida where it's still in the high 80s, but of course I had to wear a shrug to cover my fat arms. Now the question....what to wear underneath the dress? It covers a lot, but I had … [Read more...]

Guest Post by Author R.L. Griffin
My weight is something I've thought about every single day of my life since I was 13.
Although I'm excited to do this guest post, it pisses me off, because I wish I didn't have to think about my weight. I wish that I didn't have to exercise to stay the same weight, but I do, so that's reality. I've always been a well rounded body type. I competed in gymnastics from the time I was 6 until the 6th grade. I trained and practiced at least 2 hours a day every day. I'm an athlete, always have been. From my years of gymnastics I was muscular, very toned for my entire adolescence. Of course, I thought I was fat. I wasn't. When I hit college and wasn't … [Read more...]

It's all their faults, the fuckers. 2 C-sections. Now I have this THING. Granted, I'm on the fat side. But it's so concentrated in my lower belly above my scar it's strange looking! (That is NOT my belly...mine is bigger)
What is this gigantic thing hanging from my body?
Before kids I had a butt, but my waist was ridiculously small and I had no tummy. My mom used to have to take in my jeans at the waist. My whole family has big butts and small waists and chests. Then I got pregnant and gained 65 points with my first kid (I actually came out of the hospital weighing more than when I went in to give birth and never took a pound off). Every pound was in my stomach.
For years, people … [Read more...]

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About Starting on Monday

This is a fun place to talk about being curvy, willpower, diet successes and failures, motivation, family, fashion, sex, body image, and basically life in general. I hope to have guest bloggers who struggle with the same issues, and guests who overcame it all.
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Join me in my diet struggles and successes, my commentary about being the chubby friend, being a wife and mom, and trying to look the best with what I have.
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Expect some adult content, snarkiness, and frequent F-bombs.

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About Ana

I'm Ana. I'm always cheating on a diet. I gain weight preparing to "start on Monday", but I rarely get past Tuesday. Every time I lose weight, I gain it back with interest. My closet ranges from a size 12 to a size 20. I'm a chronic reader and a book blogger at Ana's Attic Book Blog. I'm married forever to a skinny guy, with a 20 year old (not at home) and a 12 year old. I hate cooking, cleaning and basically anything besides sitting on my ass and reading. I'm the queen of procrastination!

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Guest posters will include anyone that thinks they are too curvy and ones that have been there, and lost it all.
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Recent Guest Blogger

A year ago I was going to an author event and showing of Fifty Shades Darker. I had nothing to wear besides Mom clothes so I went to Target. I told myself that I was plus size and was going to just dress myself cute because there was no reason a plus size girl shouldn’t […]

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