nappy change is becoming really stressful - help please!

[posted this on nappies topic too but thought I might get better response here]

My 10month old DD absolutely hates having her nappy changed. Actually, what she hates is lying on her back or staying still for long enough to let me change her. She twists and thrashes around, making it almost impossible for me to perform the task. I find myself having to force her to stay still and I'm frightened of using brute force - it just seems wrong when she's screaming and distressed and I'm holding her down, and I'm scared of inadvertently hurting her. It's also largely ineffective because I don't have enough hands to hold her still and change a nappy.

I have tried distracting her with a toy - this works only occasionally. I have also tried changing her on my knee with her face down, and with her standing up leaning on me. Both of these positions make it nigh on impossible to fasten the nappy at the front.

Is her behaviour normal? How can I make nappy changes less stressful for both of us?

16mo ds is impossible! i've resorted to lying him on the nappy and wrestling it through his legs, while holding his wildly bucking hips down with the other hand, then laying his legs out straight and gripping them with my own legs so i can get it done up.

Make the distraction unusual things that she doesn't normally have - we had a bag of weird things - eg: clothes clip, little battered radio, small old alarm clock that ticked loudly, big bunch of keys, an old curved spoon, colourful string, etc, etc. it's okay if they're unusual and even a bit risky as you're right there with her, so she can't harm herself. If you make it a surprise and exciting the distraction'll work.

I used a much-loved dvd to get dd's nappies changed (was a nightmare). At 12 months, she pointed to her nappy and said 'poo' then pointed to the TV and said 'bear' (her name for the dvd - Jungle Book). I dutifully got out the mat andd set it up - and there was no poo!! She tricked me!

I learned to check first after that It worked really well though - unless we were out somewhere.....

Another vote for pull ups here. My DS hates/hated being on his back and I don't like holding him down (its stressful for both of us and he's bloody strong). I often chase him around the room then pull him onto my lap and distract him with a book while I whip the nappy on.

I'd go with the standing up, pull ups if possible technique. It's perfectly normal and after a while it will take you about 10 seconds to change them standing up. If it's on a bit lopsided you can neaten up later!

standing up for wet, lying down (and pinned down) for dirty. I only have experience of one so it could be fluke but it took DS about 2 weeks to get the idea that he really did have to lie down on the rare occasions I insisted and after about 2 months he went back to being easy to change.

I did booksgalore's last suggestion with DD (and occasionally with DS, but he wasn't as difficult to change) - if you duck down closer to their feet whilst doing the change you can play peepo quite well over the top of the knee above their chest. They both actually enjoyed it then.