'I think of nothing but love. The continual amusement I derive from intellectual pursuits, for which I am always being reproached as if it were a crime, finds its very justification in this singular and unceasing taste for love. For me there is no idea that is not eclipsed by love.If it were up to me, everything opposed to love would be abolished. That is roughly what I mean when I claim to be an anarchist.'- Louis Aragon (1924)

Friday, July 08, 2005

My Big Fat Highbury Adventure

Crooning on my STEREO: Une Femme Like U by K'MARONothing beats going to a Highbury Tour DRUNK.From experience, it was 3 in the afternoon, had some drinks with friends on an empty stomach and hopped onto the Tube ALONE to ARSENAL for a booked tour of the stadium. ALONE. I repeat. ALONE. Because all my life I've been surrounded by herds of RED DEVIL GLORY HUNTERS. PAIN IN THE ASS.

Anyway I wont stray from my story. I got onto the tube half pissed, got out of the tube half pissed (forgot a valid Zone 2 ticket) and climbed over the ticket gates. I was behaving like a total chav.

But for JOSE ANTONIO REYES, I was willing to lower my credibility.

With a flowery skirt and a pair of shades, I walked past local builders (they've always been my favourite- they are the only ones who'd shower me with undivided attention) who willingly showed me directions to the stadium eventhough I was blind enough(or too DRUNK) not to know that the mammoth grounds was RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE.

First of all, I was LATE. While others wore the home jersey, I was wearing designer wannabe stuff (come on, i just came from the bar!!!!!) I quickly made friends with a bunch of old chavs and pretty much hung out with them throughout the entire tour. Word then went around that I was the Moderator of the Unofficial Jose Reyes Fan Club and I became an instant celebrity.

(for those who don't know and SHOULD know: I am the infamous LYN REYES- not having watched a single home match)

The tour was comeprehensive, we were shown pretty much the stadium grounds. My personal favourite was the CHANGING ROOMS. Blolody small place, i can imagine 20 fully grown men crammed in there like sardines.

Oh, and naked as well.

I was literally making out with Jose Reyes' bench and hogging his worn jersey from other enthusiasts. (there werent many of them btw so I had it all to MYSELF....) . I was tempted to take photos of the toilet cubicle but was deterred from suspicious stares from the older chaps.... drunk weirdo.

We were shown footages of Arsenal' greatest goals BUT I was so pissed i was half-asleep in the first half (which documented 1930s successes..all I recalled was bad over-permed hair, size 6 shorts, skinny hairy legs and lycra jerseys.)

2hrs later, I was outta the stadium. Good bye Highbury, till we meet again someday.---------------------------- NOTE TO CONCERNED FELLAS!!!! I am NOT in LONDON at the moment.. so I am pretty much ALIVE and UNHARMED...... Anyway, I will vanish for the next ten days or so... I'm jetting of to LAS VEGAS tommorrow to kick some ass at the VENETIAN... CIAO ALLLLLLLLLL