The fifth one. Ew! I enlarged it to reassure my self that someone had not actually put live snails on the cake, but I'm still not sure. Why would you want rocks and snails on your cake? Any cake? Is this an indication of a slow moving relationship already on the rocks?

I cleaned out my fridge this weekend and, as usual, there was that one hidden piece of tupperware stuck waaaayy in the back that had clearly been there a while. Its contents were EXACTLY the same colors as that first cake, which I'm now calling the "Forgotten Tupperware Surprise" cake. I think the 3rd and 4th would be great at a zombie wedding -- especially the 4th, which appears to have an exit wound.

These wedding cakes always make me soooo sad (well, after I stop laughing, snorting, choking, whatever.) How must the brides feel when they first see these things? I guess some bride must have chosen that unusual cake topper (the groom trying to revive the bride after she faints upon seeing her cake?)But the other brides must be so upset.

WV: borde- The cake decorator was bordes, so she just tossed some Cool Whip and Hershey's Syrup on the cake and called it a day.

Well...we all know what dripping brown frosting means...but the real interesting cakes here are the ones here that contain hidden in-jokes by the bakers, sometimes known as Decorator's Revenge: see how the the 6th cake and the last one bulge a little? This is a subtle reference to the bride being "in a family way," if you know what I mean.... And the 7th cake -- heard the expression "shotgun wedding"? See the little silver shotgun pellets shot into the cake.... A tip o' the toque to you, decorators!

*infinity*=number of people researching the song after they read the post. Seriously. You guys should just knock us dead with your fab. singing skills and use that nifty recorder thing like you did on the Nightmare before Christmas post. REALLY it would make everything much more shiny. :D Thanks for another hilarious post!

Maybe I stand alone, but I thought cake #1 was nicely done. Yes, the colors were dark and earthy (not my first choice for a wedding cake), but I liked the sueded texture and the bow is well made. Hopefully, that's what the baker was going for. All of the others are true wrecks, though. And I think those are nuts (chestnuts?) on #5.

Oh how special that you showed wedding cake wrecks on my 2-year wedding anniversary!! Luckily for me, it did NOT bring back sad memories, as our cake was genuinely beautiful and delicious. One could be picky and point out that the little craft birds on the top looked sort of pissed, but you know, planning a wedding is very stressful!

#1 I first thought this wasn't too bad. Then I made the mistake of looking again. How is the Abandoned Bakery able to do deliveries?

#2 'Learn by doing' is not always the best way.

#3 "Yeah, we had a little fire at the bakery -- how did you know?"

#4 I would bet the bride was 'seeing red' in another sense when this showed up.

#5 I'd have to agree with @Tracy W. on the 'rocks and snails', but I was distracted by the topper. I couldn't pose that way if my life depended on it, and what is going on with the bride? People don't bend that way.

#6 & 7 represent the awful gap that can develop between concept and execution. 'Execution' must have been what the brides were thinking as well.

#8 A beehive? Really? At least it passes the 'what is it' test, which is more than can be said for the bottom tier.

#9 Baker's note to self: "Must get new shocks on delivery van. Must also remember to frost tops of cakes."

Pretty it is Guylian Chocolate Seashells on #5 although that is no excuse! Oddly, my mum once put a random snail shell from the garden on my birthday cake (since I study snails), she does swear she washed it first!

Good choice of accompanying song! I'm hoping it does NOT turn into an earworm though

#1: not my choice of colour for a wedding cake (Sharyn's description made me giggle!), but given how well the colour layer was done, this cake could have been gorgeous if only they'd remembered the icing. (how could they not have noticed?!)

#2: If they had left out that lumpy white icing, it would've been a mere wreck, and not horrible

#3: The white icing's a mess but the rest is chocolate, so forgivable. Yes, you can ALWAYS distract me with truffles ;)

#4. The baker over-reached. You have to be fabulous decorator to pull this kind of design off. If the decorator had stuck with something more conventional, it would not have made it to CW (on any day), and the bride would have been satisfied.

#5: ?! @Tracy W's comment, "is this an indication of a slow moving relationship already on the rocks" is absolutely brilliant! I knew people who gave those chocolate rocks as favours (with a tag saying something along the lines of "this relationship rocks!"), and that was cute, but it does NOT suit a cake. However, that topper would suit my sweetie and I perfectly-- I've been leaning on him like that since our teens (when I used to call him a "public leaning post"!).

#6 could have been nice if had been supported properly, and matched the greens. I notice they used the same topper as #7!

#7 if this was a cake made with love by a family member/friend who can bake but lacks decorating expertise, then it would be just fine. But for a pro, it's inadequate.

#8 the bottom cake falls into the same category as #7, and the top one-- a bee hive? as a wedding cake? That badly done, it's like #4

#9 is bad enough that I'm not willing to be charitable and say it's like #7. If you're incapable of assembling & decorating, don't try to do a wedding cake. Even if you're family!

WV 'supees'. I think these unfortunate brides got a nasty supees when they learned their baker's vision did not match their skill level.

OMG! I made the groom's cakes for the wedding where they served cake #7. I made 2, 3-D life sized Cowboys helmets and I made sure to tell my friend, who was a bridesmaid to let everyone know that I DID NOT MAKE THAT WEDDING CAKE!!!!!

These cakes look home made, not professional. I think some of these brides tried to "cut" expenses. Perhaps some had and Aunt, or BFF who said, "Hey, a wedding cake? I can do that!" If any of these were my wedding cake, I would do the cake cutting first thing to destroy the evidence!

The red one makes my eyes bleed. Don't people look at their work and go "Nah, I can't send this out." ?? I guess not but I'm betting most of these are friends or relatives doing the cake, if these are "Pros" they need to find another line of work.

my 7 year old was looking at today's post with me and started laughing uncontrollably "Those are crap!" was all she could get out....I thought you'd like to know you're reaching the next generation already hahaha

can't decide which is worse... the first one (which I'm assuming was meant to resemble moldy swiss cheese)... or the bleeding red silly string cake... or the fifth - where the groom is having to pick up his drunk bride off their collapsing disaster?

I think #5 is supposed to be a beach scene - upon zooming in, it looks like there is some brown stuff scattered on the top that is supposed to be sand and the happy couple is reclining/slumping/comatose on the beach. I had to zoom in about 4 levels before I figured out that those were chocolate shells and not dates on the bottom layer.

Are you sure about cake #1? Looking at the skill used to create the bow on top, I find it hard to believe the baker "forgot" to frost the cake. Perhaps this is how it was ordered? Maybe a misguided attempt to cut calories?

Wow, I am truly shocked by these, that are made by professionals! People paid for these cakes! Good grief, I feel really bad for the brides and grooms facing these monstrosities--forever immortalized in photos too!Lesley B.

I love the choice of song, I actually heard Nat King Cole in my head. He really kept it together (the professional that he is) but there was only so much he could do to hide his displeasure. Gosh I hope those people got refunds!

I know I'm past the comment period, but I can't figure out how the bee hive is floating over the bottom cake - let alone why. Is there some kind of clear platform that I can't see. And why is the bee hive floating over the bottom cake. All these cakes appear homemade to me. Remember the great post where the bride's mother made the cake as it melted before her eyes.

Arghhhhhhhhhhhh these are just beyond words. Especially the donut and melting poop frosting one.. gross and scary. The one cake with the red on one side looks like the red is trying to jump off and escape the cake lol. Why did they do this to the poor brides? Were they on Bridezillas??

Say, is it possible to vet the ads that you have on this site? I was exceedingly annoyed by seeing one of those ridiculous "you are the Xth visitor! Congratulations, you won! Click here!" ads bopping and shuddering in down the side of the screen while trying to read your post.

Those ads always feel like they're trying to take advantage of idiots. Probably because they're trying to take advantage of idiots. And they are so Web 1.0.

This site is better than that. Or, at least, it should be. If you can get rid of them, please do so.

I have to say, today I was more excited to read what you had written than to look at the cakes. You make me laugh every time! Can you guys please make a youtube channel of #1 signing all the song spoofs? Pretty please!

I didn't know about them but those ads tick me off too. And I hope you're right that we're better than that. I'm going to go yell at someone now and get them taken down but if you see them again, please let me know.

Our wedding is less than a month away and I have no fears about the cake..if it's horrible then I'll probably laugh my butt off and say "WE MADE CAKEWRECKS" I'll only be sad if it's bad but not bad enough to make the cut

You're not joking about scaring the brides. After reading this blog for the past two years, I was a total bridezilla about my wedding cake last June. When the bakery missed their delivery slot and I realized I wouldn't even be able to preview the cake before the reception began, I nearly had a panic attack. I was sure it was a wreck. Thank goodness it turned out just fine. But, I'm really very happy that I didn't see this post beforehand: )

The baker of the first one might have some potential. If they can learn to not combine colors and textures like that. o_O It looks like a combination of faded old play-doh with something I left in the back of my fridge too long. In B&W, it wouldn't look so bad, though.

The one with the messy chocolate drizzles looks tasty, but not pretty. The others... X_x

I ended up decorating most of my brother's wedding cake since my mom (a former decorator) couldn't say no to him but couldn't do it due to arthritis. Now I don't feel so bad about how it turned out.p.s. getting the icing smooth is HARD!!

At first I thought the picture of the last one was taken at a deliberately wonky angle - then I saw the upside-down dessert plate stuck under the base of the cake...yes, folks, it is even more wrecky than the picture makes it appear!

Search This Blog

Wreck the Halls

NEW! Pre-Order Today!

Buy the Book

Buy the NYT Bestseller

What's a Wreck?

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

order

Where's the book?

We don’t have any copies of Cake Wrecks for sale here, autographed or otherwise. We decided the shipping and handling costs would be too high to make it worth your while. So instead, buy your copies locally or online and then order personalized bookplates: it’s cheaper, easier, and I think even looks a bit nicer.

Ordering Info

Payments must be made through Paypal, which accepts all major credit cards. Sorry, but that means no checks or MOs or barter-based chickens.

We ship everything first class USPS, and will do our best to have your package in the mail within 2 days of your order.