Hard Truths

As a lifelong reader and storyteller, I have always dreamt about my “moment.”

You know, the moment you realize someone recognized your work and people start talking about it in casual conversation.

I’ve dreamt about it for as long as I can remember. I know it was a feeling of knowing that I had this gift to share, but having no idea as to what that gift could possibly be.

I dreamt about seeing my family members say to each other, “Hey, have you seen what Jordan’s doing? It’s a little weird but really interesting, right?” and connecting with this feeling that I was doing something that not only made me happy but also had an impact on the world.

Maybe that should have been when I realized I had a touch of Hero Complex, but I genuinely believe that it was a glimpse into what fulfilling my purpose here would look like. I guess I’ll leave the labeling of that up to you, dear reader.

Have you ever felt like you were given these labels in life because people wouldn’t be able to understand you without them? Let me tell you about a few of mine and see if you think you know me.

Jordan Quirk. Jordan Cole. Jordan, that short girl with the blonde hair. Jordan, that girl who likes Lion King and Lady Gaga. Jordan, the girl obsessed with Iceland. Jordan, the girl who married that really handsome guy who seems super down to earth. Jordan, that girl with the little dog that looks like a fox. Jordan, the girl who sees a little too much and feels a whole lot more than she could ever put into words.

The girl who’s more interested in hearing about your life experiences rather than who won the Whatever-ball Game at the Super Dunk Bowl Cup last night. (Although I do love talking about the cultural perspectives on sports!)

There are a lot of hard truths in this life and I’ve gracefully begun my descent back to reality from the heights of my childhood dreams. I woke up to the reality that WWE was acting. (You guys, how was that so convincing for so long?) The government is messy and has no better idea of what it’s doing than any of us do. Higher education is a little bit of a scam when you think about it long enough. Having a “gift” takes a lot more hard work and time than any superhero movie so far allows you to know. (Hello, where’s my radioactive spider bite when I need one?) Before you came into the world, your entire family was completely 100% different than it was after your arrival. Your arrival completely shifted the function of space, time, and reason for a handful of people.

Those are some pretty heavy truths to walk around with in your brain if you ask me. I’ve been trying to figure out how to walk around as a human woman here for so long while also holding hands with the knowledge that my sheer existence has fundamentally changed the structure of humanity on a microscopic scale. I’m small and insignificant in many regards, and yet I’ve affected the greatest change available to any of us here on Earth.

Just by being here, I brought forth a world of possibilities for my parents. Since I’m the first born, they were able to embody what it looked like for them to independently become “Mom” and “Dad” and collectively become parents. I brought forth the first iteration of what my grandparents would know to become their favorite chapter of life. My sister’s arrival wrote the next chapter for all those people. My cousins helped refine and edit the groundwork I laid for our grandparents.

What I’m getting at is not special to just me, not by a long shot. I got “lucky” to be filled with enough spunk to say these things out loud, but these are not truths only meant for me. They are the truths that we all hold deep within us on a cellular level.

We matter.

Not because we can get a participation trophy just for showing up to things or because we’ve been told we’re special for existing. It’s because that information is factually true.

The world would be a fundamentally different place without the existence of just one of us.

Our lives intertwine and intersect in a beautiful dance of connectedness in ways that we are unable to comprehend in this mortal flesh. Our impact on one another all too often goes undefined and unspoken. Best understood in the small moments. The laughter between sisters, the attempted scolding from a grandmother, the giggle from an aunt or uncle when you say something inappropriate, the look of awe from your grandpa as you do something on your own for the first time, the warm embrace from your dad after something shitty happens, or the look from your mother as she realizes you don’t need her in the same ways anymore. Pure love. All the moments you realize you’re becoming more and more what you were always meant to be in this grand tapestry of humanity.

A walking, talking, living, breathing being with no idea as to what they’re doing down here on Earth in the first place!

It’s beautiful and confusing and so so challenging to live with the knowledge of these truths and the ability to see these truths in anyone you interact with.

We all have this grand untapped potential that we are barely grasping onto when we accomplish our “Life Checklist” tasks in the order we’ve deemed right or wrong. Go to school, go to college, get a job, get married, buy a house, have a family, buy a car, retire, whatever.

Well, I’m here with another hard truth for you.

The order you do these things have never and will never matter. If you want something, you should do it. Granted I believe heavily in making sure it aligns with your values and to consider what you may be sacrificing by moving forward with that choice. Fortune may favor the bold, but a well thought out decision will never be wrong. Issues arise when we are unable to be clear on what the results of those decisions mean for us, but that’s a whole other blog article entirely.

So be bold and think. Be bold and follow your dream. Be bold and share that dream with everyone you meet. I’ve never met someone who said: “Wow, they just had way too much passion for my taste!”

You’ve already made the most significant impact any of us are even capable of making, and all you did was be born.

Why not figure out the next chapter in your book of Amazing Things I Accomplished Just By Being There and write it.

Because whether or not you know it, you’re along for the journey while I write mine.