NFL quarterback Michael Vick is facing federal charges for allegedly participating in illegal dogfighting, and now he's being hit with a "$63,000,000,000 billion dollar" lawsuit filed by South Carolina inmate Jonathan Lee Riches, who says Michael stole his pit bulls and sold them on eBay to buy "missiles from Iran." Fox News reports:

The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.

Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver “ delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.

Oh yeah, did I mention the lawsuit was written by hand? Jonathan Lee Riches sounds like he's got a rock solid case...LOL!