Jacqueline is obsessed with changing her body, but has no regard for her overall well-being. If anything needs to be cut out of poor Jacqueline, it's not excess skin: It's the darkness and pain that has taken over her mind and clouded her vision.

The speed at which these women are moving to fix things could break your neck ... or at least dislodge your extensions. Is any of this genuine, and how will they feel when their drunken promises fade into awkward hangovers?

Joe grabs Teresa's face and kisses it voraciously, like a starving man finally being handed a steak. Sobs rack his body and suddenly he's heaving, totally giving himself over to the emotion and crying into her face and clothes and hair like a small child.

Gorga throws all two feet of his body at Giudice, and they're officially in the shortest fight ever. Don't get me wrong, it lasts a pretty decent amount of time ... I just mean it's like watching champs at the International Stunted Growth Invitational flail their T-Rex arms about with gusto.

Kim D. and her posse of hags walk in and Rich motions for her to sit right down in the lion's den. "I heard about your little outing," Melissa tells her calmly. "[Jan] doesn't like you anymore, and I have not done anything wrong," Kim D. quickly says in defense of herself.

Though Teresa tries to put up a strong front, it's obvious that the year of silence has been painful. She finally confronts Joe ... by standing over him as he gets ready to bench press. Now, the brother she hasn't seen in oh-so-long is literally talking to her lady garden.

"There's no need to run home to my brother and make it bigger than it is," Teresa says in her interview. Note how she says "my brother" and not "her husband." Teresa still feels like she has ownership over Joe, and she views Melissa as her replacement and mortal enemy.