The coefficient of Bryson

Look at the big brain on Bryson … so large he needs the Hogan cap to hold it all in. It’s frightening to us for whom too much thinking about any one thing in the greater world is hard work and, we’re certain, will cause physical pain, which does not prevent us from thinking about our golf swings, by which we mean overthinking, out of which no good will ever come which if we thought about it should reinforce our believing there’s no profit in thinking much at all about much of anything but we somehow don’t think it applies to thinking about golf.

So we get it, in a kind of way, with Bryson DeChambeau, who thinks outside the hat on just about everything and who could explain in granular detail why he’s thinking about putting with the pin in the hole in 2019, which he could do, if he thinks he wants to, because the new rules of golf say he could.

We think, in fact we’re pretty sure, it’s all working for DeChambeau — the look, the talk, the single-length irons — who moved into the World Top Five last weekend by winning the Shriners Hospitals for Children Open, helped in the Sunday stretch run by a 58-foot putt from the fringe for eagle (with the pin in) on 16.

It’s enough to make us think we should rethink our overthinking. In fact, I’m thinking I should stand longer over the ball than ever on the tee, thinking through not just my swing thoughts but the coefficient of restitution on my same old driver and why I didn’t pull the trigger on the new one and, shit, is my pants cuff caught up in the back of my shoe … ? … and why are my buddies, who love me and want me to be happy, yelling at me? I’m thinking they’re just telling me to take my time. That’s a good thought.