We’re not even one week into 2013, yet we already have a strong candidate for CagePotato.com’s coveted MMA Fail of the Year at the year-ending Potato Awards. And yes, “coveted” is the right word here – with all of the ugly tattoos, terrible t-shirts, goofy haircuts and general jackassery in this great sport, it’s a legitimate honor to be recognized for failing harder than everyone else around you. Last year, the award went to a guy who dared his opponent to knock him out seconds before getting knocked out. Following in his footsteps, this instructor is so confident that he has discovered the “ultimate” way to defend against an armbar that you should really be expecting his demise well before it plays out.

This guy’s ”Ultimate Armbar Defense” isn’t exactly scientific; it involves grabbing your own gi collar and holding on for dear life. Don’t ask me how a jiu-jitsu purple belt didn’t realize that he was setting himself up for a textbook gi choke, but he didn’t, and the inevitable happens by the end of the video. My favorite part of the video is the very end, when he wakes up, remembers where he is, puffs his chest out and looks into the camera with manly, Ronda Rousey-esque confidence.

It’s sort-of brilliant - your opponent can’t kick your ass if you kick your own ass first, and even though you’d lose a grappling match if you choked yourself out to defend against an armbar, at least your opponent didn’t technically beat you. As long as you didn’t have an incompetent referee, you’d lose well before your opponent realizes you’re asleep and armbars you out of principle.

The bar has been set high in 2013, Taters. I don’t recommend trying to defeat this guy at his own game, but for those about to fail, I salute you.

Goddamn, for a website that prides itself on fluency in the grammar of pro-wrestling, it's amazing you didn't figure this one out. If you're still stumped, see the most recent comment on middleeasy: "WORK."
"Don’t ask me how a jiu-jitsu purple belt didn’t realize that he was setting himself up for a textbook gi choke..." You've got to be shitting me Falvo. Seriously, the fact that this guy has been known for posting comedy videos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kbdhXmJtjQ) didn't tip you off?