Friday, March 6, 2009

Top 3 Ways To Make Women Come To You

One of my favorite guy books is Tao of Dating, which inspired the hit guy movie, The Tao of Steve. That movie shows how Dex, a fat guy with no aspirations, easily gets hot, gorgeous women. How? Simply by following the 3 rules of the Tao. They are:

Retreat, for as Heidegger said, "We pursue that which retreats from us."

Or, to put it more simply:

Be desireless

Be excellent

Be GONE

Dex was a master at hiding his interest; he would never show too much interest in a girl--even if inside he was full of desire! He also had an unmistakable talent, which didn't have to be anything too fancy:, but certainly would impress women: he knew how to cook a really mean lobster dish. Thus, he fulfilled the second rule.

We guys can learn from this: He was expert (or at least really good) at one thing, and he did it well. We can apply this to more than just dating! In the process, he followed the first and third rules of the Tao by not being overly eager to impress the girl and get her phone number, and just after he impressed the girl with his talent, he would be gone. After cooking a great meal for her, he would say, "Well, I gotta get ready for bed."

She would beg him not to go, thus DE-powering herself and EM-powering Dex. And he would say, "Well, I guess could stay a little longer." And you can guess where it went from there...

So, like Dex, you should aim to be excellent at something, all while "holding the cards" to a woman's heart. Does that mean you have to know how to cook gourmet meals or be a black belt in Tae Kwan Do?

No way! It simply means you have to find within yourself that one talent, that one skill, that PASSION, that separates yourself from the rest of the male pack-and use it to your every advantage.

And believe me: Every guy has one.

I'll give you an example of how to do this. His name's Alex, and he's most certainly NOT the most talented person in the world. Like Dex, he's not exactly a man on a mission; he plays lots of video games and watches lots of TV. Yet somehow he's never lacking for female companionship.

Why? Because when Alex goes out and meets girls, he does something that amazes them: he's taught himself (proving that great talent does not have to come naturally) some really impressive card tricks. That's it. Alex is NOT an athlete, he's not a gourmet cook, he's not a guitar player. He just taught himself how to do some cool magic tricks, and does them so well that girls are naturally attracted to him. It works!

But does Alex go out of his way to show off his skill? NO. Actually, what Alex does is act really easy and really casual: ask the girl lots of easy and not too inquisitive questions about herself (first rule of the Tao: be desireless), then wait til there's a pause in the conversation to casually ask, "Hey, you wanna see something cool?" The girl will say yes, and he'll tease her: "Oh, too bad. You'll have to wait til later."

Guys, that's not just effective--it is FUN to bait and switch on a girl! :) And they love it, even if they pretend not to.

This is what I call "curiosity building," and it's a proven girl getter. Stimulate her curiosity, hold her at bay, and she'll not only become more curious in your talent, but more interested in you.

This is all part of the art of impressing women, an art that takes time to master but once you've done it once, the next few times are easy. Naturally, it does require that you actually show the girl your talent in action, of course; saying you're a great cook and then not being able to describe what you do accurately, or not be able to cook for her at all, will only make you look foolish and lose the girl quicker than you say, "Sayonara."

But now, as a single guy or a guy looking for a new relationship, you have the chance to work on the skills you have, however small they may be, and do something truly magical to impress women. Look at your time of single status not as a loss, but as an opportunity, to become a truly one-of-a-kind guy.

And once you've figured out what your talent or talents is, make the most of them. Learn how to lead girls along with your talent; like Alex, create opportunities out of them. If you know how to cook, ask the girl what her favorite plate is. Say she answers, "Penne a la vodka." You should respond, "Really? Wow, that's cool, because I make a great dish of Penne a la vodka." She'll naturally want to see how you make it, so you can answer, "Yeah, it's too bad I have to be leaving, you won't get to try it just yet."

Don't ask her to come over to your house to try your cooking-instead, be desireless and retreat. Make HER ask to come to your house or apartment to try out your cooking. That way you're making HER the desired one, and YOU the empowered one. And when you "hold the cards," you can get anything you want. ANYTHING.

It's all about learning your talents-and knowing how to use your talents. This will get you the girl, and help you find true love.

If you really want to take it to the next level, I highly recommend you investigate Tao of Dating yourself. As you saw above, it's got some pretty clever and effective tips that can change your interaction with women in some amazing, fun ways. Good luck!