New York City, which is broke, of course, is selling off naming rights for its city parks. For mere millions! Using sociogeographical insight and imaginary marketing expertise, we have compiled a list of exactly who should buy these rights for a half-dozen parks. Read it and argue:

Central Park Tennis Center ($5 million): Um a tennis company HELLO?!?

Pool at McCarren Park, Hipster Central (Pictured, in all its glory. $3 million): The hipster kickball league, obviously. If they can't get the money together, then Raytheon Integrated Defense Systems.