Hmm. Was just having a think back to my own clubbing days as I told somebody who has kids same age as mine how old I was and when I heard how old she was, was thinking hmmm, I was still clubbing then. Ah, happy days.

It's one set of (boyfriend's) friends that do the all nights etc. Get on really well with them but just have no interest in that kind of night. So whenever we're invited I say no. But will happily go for dinner or drinks or to a normal party with them. Have been to a normal club with them til 2 which was fun, but can't do later than that.. And boyfriend can always go without me, I'm not bothered by that at all and he knows it. But I feel guilty that he has the choice of either not going or going without me.

It's definitely not him making me feel bad, he just accepts I'm not up for it.

Maybe it's repeatedly saying no? I didn't care the first few times.

Im 32, two young children. Mild insomnia which is mostly under control (until I fuck it up by for eg changing my sleep pattern too much)

I used to love that sort of thing at 22. But now at 32ish with 2 kids? No way, the very idea is exhausting! YADNBU

Do boyfriends friends have kids? Maybe that is what changes things.

Even when I was up for stuff like that DH never was. I just went with other people, was fine. If its an every weekend thing maybe you're not so compatible but if he just wants to do it occasionally and is otherwise interested in same things as you then I think fine to just say "not my thing".

God I gave partying up at 23! I'd been clubbing since I was 15 and was bored of it. My last night out was February 12th 2011 - for valentines - and my friend and I sat on a couch in the smooth music area judging the naked ness of the women, the drunkenness of the idiot men and both fell asleep by 1:15 our dp's had to wake us up and lure us to a taxi! Turns out I was a couple of weeks pregnant with ds at the time but still

Obviously in my late 50s, the very idea of sleeping on the floor is out of the question.

However I did go my first music festival two year ago and loved it.

DD practically wore her lip out sneering at this but has now come round, entered the draw for tickets and will come with us. (Actually, we'll drive her and her mates there and ensure they pitch their tents well away from us.)

I have agreed to go on an all night star watch thing. Sounded fab back in March. Now it is upon me, my thrill level has abated. I am certain I will be a mosquito magnet, step in fox poo, be eaten by a bear and have hot flashes. I really really do not like fun things anymore..

If you were 18 or something then I might understand why your boyfriend's friend think you are odd. At 32 with two young children then, no, you are not being unreasonable. Actually I would say that these friends are because at 32 they should have more sense (unless your BF is younger than you e.g. 18 )

How can they even keep up that kind of thing at that age? I started running out of stamina for partying like that before I was even 25. Dinner, drinks et is much more civilized.

I think basically, they are into dance music and proper clubbing. I am not, never have been. I enjoy having a few drinks and getting merry, not getting wasted.

I would quite happily go to a party but would want to be able to leave and go to bed, not have to stay up until the last people left so I could then sleep on the living room floor.

I'd go to a club, as long as I didn't have to stay all night.

It's only a few of his friends that are into this, and it's not every week or anything. I think I just feel bad because he enjoys dance music and clubbing, and would quite like me to go to these things with him but I won't if it's an all nighter or involves sleeping on floors or in cars.

The star watch thing sounds good though (although I'd probably be asleep by midnight!)

The drugs bit is irrelevant really. A couple of them do when they go to a big club night but there has never been any pressure or even suggestion that I do.I suppose I only included it as it's a factor in me not wanting to go to these things, being with people who are off their faces isn't fun.

My DP and I are pretty hardcore, I have a 5 year old DD, and I'm 32. We have mutual friends who are similar age and circumstances who cannot keep up, and would rather dinner or a pub. I sometimes burn myself out and have to limit my party ways, but I would never feel like my mates are boring if they don't fancy an all nighter.

I also like quiet nights in, really depends on my mood. Don't make yourself feel like that, I bet your friends don't think that at all!

I've spoken to my boyfriend about it this morning and asked him how he feels about me not wanting to do stuff like that. He said he feels disappointed and like I should make the effort.

He has also pointed out previously that he does things with me that he doesn't particularly want to do. Like go on days out with the kids. Or go to stay with my friends...Aibu to think that it's slightly different because it doesn't involve anyone having to stay up all night or sleep on a living room floor? I'd go somewhere I didn't particularly want to during the day or evening, it's the all night lack of sleep aspect I can't cope with. I've tried to explain that to him and have said I'll go to a club as long as I don't have to stay there til 5 or 6am or hsve to sleep in a car for a few hours before the journey home.

I'm not sure he gets it. I guess if you are really into music and think clubbing is great then it can maybe be hard to understand that for some people it just isn't . I don't mind the music, but nor do I think it's amazing.

He hardly ever goes anyway, maybe once or twice a year so it's not a massive issue within our relationship. Re the party he has said he wouldn't like having to wait til everyone went home to sleep on living room floor either, it's just that he would like to go to his friend's housewarming party and that's the only way to do it without having to pay for a hotel and he'd rather not go than pay for a hotel.