July 29, 2010

I'm not sure if he has some kind of premium iPhone app for showing up when I'd least like to see him, but without fail, my ex crash lands on my fun planet at the worst times.

I'll be giggling up a storm with a dude I just met, and just when he takes my hand and asks me to dance, I'll see my ex's face staring at me through the crowd looking at me all wounded like I just ran over his cat.

Or, I'll be yelling my phone number in another guy's ear and I'll look up to see my ex leaning against a wall with his arms crossed, shaking his head. My new guy won't even notice it, but I'll feel his stony stare searing into my skull like a shitty laser.

Why does he always have to magically appear when I try to get my swerve on? Did he affix a tracking tag under my skin when I wasn't looking? Did Scotty beam him in to this club? Is he a bloodhound, following my scent around the city? (For what it's worth, I do smell pretty good.) Sometimes, this town just feels too small.