I want to be a pirate when I grow up

Think about it; what better life is there than that of a pirate? You wake up in the morning and eat exotic fruits and nuts for breakfast, washing it down with half a barrel of rum (all pirates drink rum, ex: "Yo ho ho and a bottle or rum", famous pirate song) . After some lounging in your hammock, you gather the crew and head out for a day’s work. Capture a ship and be done work by lunch, where you can kick back with a few margaritas and wenches (necessary for piratedom). What other job can you hang around a boat all day with guns and booze with your friends and make tons of money (pirate term: “booty”). I honestly cannot see who in their right mind would not want to be a pirate!