The newest trailer has arrived for the Michael Bay produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot and it’s either the coolest thing your ten-year-old cousin will ever see or it’s the ruination of everything that made your 35-year-old cousin the manchild he is today. It also provides the best glimpse yet at the full group of turtles, complete with gear, weapons and colorful bandanas to tell them apart and give them character depth.

Also included is the first real look at William Fichtner’s Shredder and his pretty bad ass suit. I don’t think anyone could find a way to complain about that, but go ahead and surprise me. The turtles still might look weird, but I don’t think this is going to be the gigantic turd that everyone online wants to make it out to be.

And are all of the Turtles going to get a new voice actor? Or were the film’s producers like “**** it, we need to put some more star power behind this.” Wonder if Woodburn and the fratboy actor playing Leo recorded dialogue not knowing it would be dubbed over later.

I read original Eastman-Laird. I enjoyed the goofy first cartoon. I preferred Dan Spitz’ TMNT guitar over Scott Ian’s Dredd guitar (but just slightly!).

When this trailer started, contrary to wanting to hate it, I got kinda excited. I mean, it’s dark and gritty. It reminded me of the old comics. It made the concept of Foot ninja running around seem kinda interesting.

And then the TMNT showed up. Fuck this movie. Fuck it in the neck. Fuck it good until its dead and they just leave it to rot. No more burying the Turtles in the Pet Cemetary, leave it gone.

(although, I kinda like the new cartoon when I can convince my kids to leave it on)

Method acting. April’s phone skills are just as good as Foxes acting skills.

But FWIW, her not doing much of anything between this and Bay’s Transformers 2 (which came out like 5 years ago) proves that she does have skills in front of the camera. A shame we’ll probably never see it though.

Typical Michael Bay with the enforcement of overused stereotypes: Donatello is a nerd so he just HAS to have thick glasses with the bridge taped up. He just has to. Still not as bad as those Autobots from Revenge of the Fallen though.

Remember how Bay postponed or did some re-shoots for Transformers 3 when he discovered wingsuits and just HAD to put it in the film? I’m sure when that reddit photoshop of how to “fix” the turtles’ faces went viral, a lot of nerds were hoping he’d postpone this film in order to fix their faces lol.