Grammy Sh-t vs Diarrhoea: Miley vs Xtina

Sasha posed this question during the liveblog. My answer was that at gunpoint, I’d take Miley. That’s the point of sh-t vs Diarrhoea – it’s supposed to be hard.

I know Miley doesn’t look so tragic here in photos, and you have to remember, the photo agencies generally don’t post too many of the bad ones on these occasions, but during the pre-show with Seacrest, she was working a significant bloat. The kind of bloat that settles in when, you know, too much beer or vodka or salvia happens on a Saturday night. There was also a lot of side tit action eating up the camera. Her mother didn’t seem to mind. And how choked were Kings of Leon to be paired with her to present? Maybe it’s punishment for putting out such a sh-t album. Also…Miley’s wearing Cavalli. Of course.

All that however in comparison to Christina Aguilera is relatively minor. We’ve been through it, over and over, how f-cked up her face appears to be. How f-cked up SHE appears to be. How she’s barely recognisable these days. Go look up the video for Genie in a Bottle. That isn’t the same person.

And then…

She fell.

I didn’t notice it at first as it came at the end of the Aretha Franklin tribute but all of a sudden the emails came flooding in and I had rewind my pvr and there it is…