The difference between being a male poet and being a gay man is that it has become increasingly acceptable to come out as gay.

Being a poet, and a male, is very similar to being a gay man. You have to confront something of the same prejudices, the same ridicule, and the same fear that your nature opposes any claim to masculinity. You understand from an early age that your instincts are driven in a different way than most men, and because of that you struggle to find a group of men with whom you can bond, with whom you can identify and claim for your tribe.

There is a big difference though. In the last forty years it has become increasingly acceptable to be a gay man. Though you face the same archaic prejudices, you at least have a community you can attach yourself to, a tribe ready and waiting to accept you, and which will understand your struggle.

Not so with the male poet, or the male artist.

Let me clear something up first, because I know what kind of arguments are coming my way. Ostensibly, society encourages art. You can’t walk two blocks in any major city without being confronted by art, exhibitions, theatre or any other kind of creative celebration. High art has always been a central aspect of our civilisation, and male artists and writers and performers form the backbone of our cultural heritage. If anything, you might say, there are too many male artists and not enough female ones. Right? That’s your argument, isn’t it?

Well, no. You’re wrong. On the surface, our civilisation has a very happy relationship with art. Poetry is celebrated, just as great science and academic intelligence is celebrated. Those artists of achievement are welcomed into the central institutions of our society.

There is something unmale about claiming a poetic identity. You are tacitly declaring to the world that you make no priority of making money, of making yourself immediately useful to society.

However, that’s not what I am talking about. I am not talking about the surface level of society. I am not talking about the pageantry of institutionalised art and ideas. I am talking about the cultural subconscious. I am interested on where The Poet fits in as a male archetype in the cultural subconscious.

The truth is he doesn’t fit it in.

It’s one thing for a society to celebrate the success of an artist. It is quite another for a society to encourage artistic endeavors in their infancy, when the poet sets out on his mission. An artist realises they are an artist, when they are confronted with the truth of themselves. They realise that they cannot do anything else other than express this burning desire within them. No matter how much they try to find some “practical” avenue in which to place their energies or focus on making a living, the instincts and forces of their heart will not allow themselves to be manipulated.

It’s a terrifying realisation, because it has nothing to do with talent. It has nothing to do with formal capacity, or giftedness. In these instances, society is a little more lenient. It can allow someone to be different if that difference is manifested in outstanding excellence, if that unique tendency is marked out by some noteworthy gift.

But most artists are not like that. Most artists are born with an instinct, a different idea about what’s important than what society says should be their priority. Most artists start with their insights, and the rest of their lives is spent desperately searching for a tangible way of manifesting those insights, one that is effective but which will also allow them a place in society.

Many artists do not survive this process. The demands of society are such that results must be evident. It is not enough to have an idea, one must show formal talent, one must have the skills ready-made to prove the worth of that idea. My point is that society does not celebrate artists, it only celebrates successful artists.

It is my belief that the archetype of The Poet is the hardest to integrate into a Patriarchal society. In a Patriarchal society, poetry and the arts are generally reserved for the girls, unless there is there is an early recognisable talent for a certain craft. Then and only then can there be any allowance made.

It is hard for female artists in a Patriarchal context. I understand that. But I think it is harder for men to be artists. I really do. I don’t think the precedence given to so-called masculine values in our culture helps those men who are born with a poetic nature.

Society can forgive a woman who decides that her best course of action in life is to go on welfare and write everyday. Society will offer no such forgiveness to a man. He is born with too much cultural baggage for that to be acceptable to his peers and even himself.

When a man “comes out” as a poet, he is at best met with bemused expressions. At worst, he suffers the angry prejudices that a gay man must encounter early in his coming out process. There is something unmale about claiming a poetic identity. You are tacitly declaring to the world that you make no priority of making money, of making yourself immediately useful to society. You offer no prudential value to your community.

The archetype of the male Poet is an anathema to a Patriarchal society. Men who embody this archetype suffer a peculiar fate. They can involve themselves in society to the degree that they repress themselves, to the degree that they bury the truth of themselves, and hide their sensitivities, and their “feminine” natures.

Until society turns around and recognises these men for their achievements, such individuals are treated with a contempt. They are a threat, because this society is founded on suppressing volatile and emotionally driven behavior on the part of men.

These men desperately search throughout their lives for a mask that society will deem acceptable, that will protect them from isolation and shame. Such men yearn to be taken on their own terms, to be seen as men despite the range of their emotional facilities, despite the fact that they offer nothing to a society driven by industry and market value.

Some men adopt masks that seem to allow their art to form part of their masculinity. However, they are faced with a life of internal conflict. Think of the likes of Dostoevsky, Bukowski, Hemingway. Men whose artistic nature drove them to poverty, drink, or suicide regardless of the greatness of their art. Men who had to suffer to prove their worth as poets, and who were never really accepted even in the face of celebrated success.

The Poet as archetype is an affront to the male dominated society. He produces nothing of immediate value. He exhibits emotional nuances that threaten masculine stereotypes. He is by nature a sensual creature in a society that fears sensuality above anything else.

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Thanks for penning this, James. I agree that it’s unusual to be a poet of any gender in the modern age, and that being a male poet presents its own challenges. However, the insunuation that it’s in any way harder to be a straight male poet than a gay man in modern society is–I hope–just intended as hyperoble. For whatever reason, some of my closest friends are gay men, including the best man at my wedding. Seeing what he and his partner go through in California with society questioning the legitimacy of their marriage, and even that of their family… Read more »

Hi Robert – I take your point. But no. It’s not (just) hyperbole. My best and longest standing friend is a gay man. I have discussed these issues with him. I don’t think the politics is so overt for a heterosexual poet as it is for a gay man, but I think it is the same. The forces of ‘deprogramming’ may not happen in a camp, but they happen in schools and univesities and in normatively governed relationships, just as much as any prejudice. I think it may even be argued that it goes further than the rights for women,… Read more »

As Frederick Smock put it, “Poets and intellectuals … are the ones tyrants go after first.” In politically milder climates, though, the struggles for eqality of women, minorities, and the LGBT community just rank higher for me from a practical standpoint.

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K

5 years 1 month ago

“Lyric poets generally come from homes run by women: the sisters of Esenin and Mayakovsky, the aunts of Blok, the grandmothers of Hölderlin and Lermontov, the nurse of Pushkin and, above all, of course, the mothers–the mothers that loom so large over the fathers. Lady Wilde and Frau Rilke dressed their sons like little girls. Is it a wonder that the boy kept gazing anxiously into mirrors? It is time to become a man, Orten wrote in his diary. The lyric poet spends a lifetime searching for signs of manhood in his face.” — Life is Elsewhere, Milan Kundera

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BD

5 years 1 month ago

It seems to me that focusing narrowly on the word “poet” here is missing the point. It’s certainly possible to write poetry in a conventionally masculine way about conventionally masculine things, and I’m not aware that anyone is questioning Dr Dre’s testosterone levels. What James is talking about is less the writing of verse per se than a certain way of seeing the world, which for the sake of shorthand I’ll call Keatsian, and the way it’s at odds with what posters here sometimes call the Success Myth. As a visual artist, I’ve found the same thing. Broadly, the notion… Read more »

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Peter von Maidenberg

5 years 1 month ago

“…the acceptable range of heterosexual male expression has actually narrowed in my lifetime, I think, at least as far as the social mainstream is concerned. Has anyone else noticed that?” Hell yes. Maybe it’s got something to do with what Christopher and Ashen Dream said about art today. If it’s not mainstream, consumable, and right to the point, it opts out of the common world, and opens itself (and of course its creator or enjoyer) up to being called dreamy and useless. Men, OTOH, are supposed to deal in commodities, like bodies, simple ideas, interchangeable goods. They’re also supposed to… Read more »

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Quadruple A

5 years 1 month ago

I for the most part understand the whole Keatsian sensibility that he was trying to convey. I have some of those intuito-feeling traits myself. For some reason something here made me feel like some sly anti-mens righter was mocking that particular approach to life as some kind of pathetic “nice guy” ploy. I don’t know what it is about people that makes them have such a hard time seeing men in that capacity. I don’t think it hasn’t always been that way. I think its more of a relatively recent historical development. Sadly, at one point women could not be… Read more »

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Peter von Maidenberg

5 years 1 month ago

“We can not have a stable society that does not consider where it is going, what it really wants, and does not see the dangers in the alienation that it promotes.”

Then maybe we can’t have a stable society period. At least not at any level of civilization and material comfort.

FWIW, I’m given to drastic what-if propositions. What if all that blindness was what allowed us to get up in the morning, and all that alienation was the only way we could get ahead and not starve?

Thanks BD for qualifying my points. I think it is harder for a woman to be a *successful* artist and to hold onto the integrity of that success. To be taken as a success rather than a piece of ass. However, I think it is harder for men to simply be artists prior to success. This is the thing I am focusing on in this post. And yes, I was thinking of JK Rowling. Her story is very well known in Edinburgh. She got a council flat in Leith and went on the dole (welfare). If she hadn’t done that… Read more »

Interesting. As young man in my mid-20s, and an amateur poet, I’m often confronted with the issues raised in this article. I live in France, and it’s no different. I’ve noticed that women, in general, seem to think it’s cool, while most men I’ve met find it a bit odd – perhaps “unmanly”? The only exception are my gay friends, and the few straight sensitive men I know. I suppose that a lot of men write it off as an eccentric trait of character linked to the fact that I’m an English/English literature teacher – a position that’s usually held… Read more »

Interesting. I think that sometimes people are all to quick to write off the struggles of men (or think pretty little “….yeah it can suck for guys sometimes too” statements are enough in order to avoid actual discussion and nuance). Regardless of who may have it harder it would be nice to see such burdens lifted.

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Quadruple A

5 years 1 month ago

I can’t help musing, is this satire? It wouldn’t be the first time satire has made its way past the editors attempts at moderation.

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h

5 years 1 month ago

I think it just proves his point that you won’t even take his argument seriously.

When by thy scorn, O murd’ress, I am dead And that thou think’st thee free From all solicitation from me, Then shall my ghost come to thy bed, And thee, feign’d vestal, in worse arms shall see; Then thy sick taper will begin to wink, And he, whose thou art then, being tir’d before, Will, if thou stir, or pinch to wake him, think Thou call’st for more, And in false sleep will from thee shrink; And then, poor aspen wretch, neglected thou Bath’d in a cold quicksilver sweat wilt lie A verier ghost than I. What I will say,… Read more »

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Quadruple A

5 years 1 month ago

“Society can forgive a woman who decides that her best course of action in life is to go on welfare and write everyday.” – I don’t think this is generally acceptable for either sex. In order to go on any kind of substantial welfare program in the U.S. you must have a documented disability otherwise its welfare fraud.

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BD

5 years 1 month ago

James lives in Edinburgh. I’m not sure if JK Rowling still does.

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Hilary

5 years 1 month ago

“Society can forgive a woman who decides that her best course of action in life is to go on welfare and write everyday.” I agree with almost everything you say–deciding to be an artist is difficult decision and often laughed at–and I especially agree that patriarchy is in many ways harder on men than on women, but please be careful about making claims like this. It’s been a long fight for women to be included in the arts at all, and women on welfare–especially if they happen to have children–are not exactly a forgivable set in society today. As a… Read more »

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Christopher

5 years 1 month ago

I’m afraid I’d have to disagree with this on a few fronts. First off, I don’t think many poets fear being disowned by their own family. I love poetry, write a bit myself, love reading it (by other people), and I think you’ve really hit upon something in that a surprising amount of men write it without admitting it to others. But I think a big part of the issue of poetry and society is that it’s no where near as prevalent an art form as film and music. It’s in a minority now, like ballet and opera, and I… Read more »