Biting the hand of Project Fear

Thank you

I’d just like to thank everyone for their kind words and comments on yesterday’s blog post. I was deeply touched seeing the support and love which was so freely and generously offered. I visited Andy at the hospital today intending to tell him, but he was sleeping so I didn’t stay long. He’s suffering from another infection and they’ve put him on oxygen to help him breathe.

He’s not at death’s door. The inevitable is not imminent, but he’s very weak and frail now. His dementia is continuing its unstoppable progression, and sadly it seems to be progressing more rapidly than we had hoped. When he was diagnosed the doctor said that half the patients who receive a diagnosis of vascular dementia survive longer than five years after they start to show symptoms. So you hope that your loved one will be amongst that 50% and not the 50% who don’t survive five years. Andy has been showing symptoms for two to three years now, and sadly it looks like he’s going to be amongst the 50% who don’t make it five years. But where there is life there is hope, and we can only hope that his condition stabilises. He’s in good hands, and the staff at Lightburn Hospital are very caring and supportive.

Most of the time I cope, but sometimes the enormity of what is happening falls on you like the Carntyne rain – and you are suddenly overcome by it all. That’s what happened yesterday, and I got a bit emotional about it. After writing yesterday’s post I wasn’t at all sure whether to publish it, but I am glad I did. Your words have helped more than you can imagine. And it helped me to get my feelings out. You can’t bottle these things up inside. Thank you all for listening.

An old friend of Andy’s is coming from London tomorrow to see him and I hope that will perk him up a bit. I need to take a bit of time for myself and Andy now, to try and get back on an even emotional keel, so won’t be posting anything else for a couple of days. I plan to write a piece following the ‘Great Darling Arse on a Plate Debate’ so will try and publish a new piece on Wednesday.

The Dug, you’ll be pleased to know, is as happy as ever. He’s snoring on the sofa without a care in the world.

It is nice to see we are all human and can be touched by tragedy, at these moments you see the very best coming out in other people, Who will rally round you and as the old saying goes a problem shared is a problem halved .My dear friend our thoughts are with you might my God bless you both.

Like others, I read your post yesterday but could only think that any words of mine would be totally inadequate so did not add a comment. But I now feel ashamed I did not at least make the effort while you take the time, when you must be feeling so low, to post a thank you to those who did. I wish you strength to cope with whatever lies ahead and send love to you and Andy – and the Dug!

if had been able to compose a sentence or two in support i could not have done so as well as you have, your words sum up my own feelings re not posting yesterday and if i may i would like to associate myself with your comments and good wishes

As Margaret says, I should have responded too! Just didn’t know what to say other than, our thoughts are with you. It just doesn’t seem enough, but I hope you can see others have written it better than me…..

Jeez we live in a hard sometimes cruel world, well done on holding it together as best you can Paul, never met you but you’re an inspiration to many many people. Much love to you both from me and Debbie.

I admire your courage in facing your problems and in spite of everything you’ve taken the time to say thank you to us. I can only say I’m thinking of you and hope things ease up soon. Take care of yourself and Andy and the Dug.

Andy ,I read all your blogs and I find them highly informative, very interesting, and entertaining. But the real reason for this post is to say that my sister has the same “problem” as Andy. I understand what you are going through – and what Andy is going through – and you’ll note I can’t bring myself to mention the name of the “problem’.

Take care Paul and don’t mind us. Much love for you and Andy from Michael and me. You come back when you’re ready, and I look forward to your take on Tuesday’s programme. Bernard Ponsonby better come down hard on Darling’s attempts to interrupt or talk over Salmond or I might do irreparable damage to our telly.

Paul, you’ve touched so many people on this blog. Your words come straight from your heart to ours. I sure I am not the only reader who just wants to put my arms around the three of you for a big hug. Hope you can have some good moments in your wee break.

Paul, I’m very sorry to hear about Andy’s condition and your current circumstances. Many of us have been greatly encouraged (and entertained) by your excellent blog, and your contribution to the Scottish independence movement should one day receive the recognition it deserves. You have a wonderful sense of humour, and I sense that this helps you to cope with life when things are tough. We all have to face the tragic loss of close family and friends at some times in our lives – it’s all part of the human experience, of course. The fact that we are all in the same boat, in this respect, does not make it any easier, however. Rest assured that most/all of us will understand your feelings, at least to some extent. God bless you both.

Will be thinking of you and hope that you get a well earned rest. Andy is in the best place for him as you rightly say, a fresh face will be good for both of you.
Ginger is exactly like my Hektor, snoring after his walk this morning having batted off another adoring woman. Seems even being neutered doesn’t diminish his charms.
I am sure we will are all ooking forward to the “Alistair erse on plate” as seen through your eyes, so you need to be really fresh for that. Look after yourself.

Paul, thank you for having the courage to share such intensely personal and painful emotions with us. I am so glad you did decide to post yesterday’s blog. You are an inspiration to many. Deeply sorry for the heartbreak you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Andy.

Paul, I’m a long time lurker and an avid reader of your blog. You have given so much laughter, tears and hope to many of us who feel privileged to be able to share your thoughts on life. All of us stand with you at this very difficult time.

Paul, I can understand your initial doubts about posting “The Rain In Carntyne” but I’m really glad you did.

You need to express your feelings, bottling it up will only harm you. Rest assured that you have
hundreds of readers who wish they could be an “ear” for you in person. Your blog is a constant source of inspiration, it’s the human side of what we’re fighting for and it’s what I turn to whenever I
feel a bit down after wading through more mainstream media crap.

Andy, your good self and the dug are in our thoughts and we’re all wishing the best for you all.
You’re family even though we’ve never met and we’re here for you when you need a wee bit of support.

Keep strong Paul,I have been there and got the tee shirt, I know what you are going through. However I hope the kind words from all here, will continue to help you find the strength you need.
Best Wishes.

Was so moved by your Rain in Carntyne post that I couldn’t comment at all… so I just shared it with various friends instead, and it was widely appreciated, Your ability to see the world, no matter how dark the clouds, with a spark of sunshine, humour and optimism, is wonderful.

Hang in there. I know we’ve never met and we maybe never will but you’ve touched my life by sharing your story and sharing your unwavering compassion and optimism. I’m from the generation that has grown up with equality. I was able to be openly gay as long as I’ve know (coming up for 15 years now) and that’s thanks to you and people like you who survived the horrors of persecution and didn’t let that get in the way of love and hope.

I’m equally proud and thankful for your thoughtful contributions for the independence debate. I know these are trying times and I know no words from a stranger can truly help, but please keep going and hang on in there. You and Andy are in my thoughts daily and I wish you the very best. Keep strong.