If you thought your tactical novelties would have to be shelved now that Tactical BBQ Apron-wearing season is over, ThinkGeek is happy to inform you that, au contraire, you can still have a Holly MOLLE Christmas with their Tactical Holiday Stocking. Check out its integrated straps for candy cane insertion. Its swivel carabiner for hearth mounting. Its pair of quick-release clips on the toe for securing an R-Rated Talking Ted by his neck when you run out of space on the inside. And the stocking is black! Because spirited holiday colors are for the weak!

The Tactical Holiday Stocking is made of heavy-duty nylon and hangs 17-1/2" long x 11" wide. Additional accoutrements include a grab-and-go top handle, bi-directional side zipper, and small external pouch.

You can go all out Clark Griswold and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation on your holiday decorating this year without risking falling off the roof or running up a thousand-dollar electrical bill. Just make yourself...

I've dispatched the gifts I need to wrap, and am on to the stuff I need to stuff. Stockings were always my favorite part of Christmas as a kid. They'd been hanging on the mantel all flat and limp for weeks and then, suddenly...

Thousands of decorative lights from the palm of my hand to the branches of my trees, or spans of my walls in minutes. Minutes. Without the hassle of knotted wires. Without the danger of ladders. Without the frustration...

Hairy Christmas, dudes! Wear this Sexy Chest Christmas Sweatshirt to your holiday party and watch Mrs. Claus become Mrs. Can't Keep Her Claus Off You. You'll not only put all the other Ugly Christmas Sweaters to shame...

The Christmas Story Village collection shrinks snapshots of the highs and lows of Ralphie Parker and his family's life so that this holiday season, you can bring them a little closer to your own. From Ralphie's bunny...

If Santa approved of beard ornaments I think he would have invented Beardaments - or at least worn some - himself. Unless he's just leaving Beardaments to those they can really benefit. To all the lumberjacks and hipsters...

Remember Feisty Pets? The sweet-to-snarling stuffed animals are celebrating the holiday season with a Feisty Santa Bear, the ultimate cuddly teddy who can turn vicious grizzly in the blink of an eye. Or, more accurately...

While I appreciate the idea of this Dude Abides Ugly Christmas Sweater, I think it missed its chance of truly abiding by not making the background a Persian rug motif. Bowling balls and pins are nice and Lebowski affiliated...

Oh the trouble Clark Griswold could have saved himself if only he'd gone on Christmas vacation in the 2010s. Nowadays one little green box fitted with one pint-sized disco ball connected to one tiny projector are all...

If your wife won't let you Clark Griswald it up with a 20' Christmas tree in the house, take your desire to overdo it exuberant holiday spirit on the road with a Christmas Car Tree. The rooftop tannenbaum gives your car...

The embodiment of ugly Christmas sweater awesome right down to the KO, KO, KOs running along its upper border. It's Ken v. Ryu...and a snowflake...in this Street Fighter spin on the most heinous of yarn creations (100%...

These Deadpool Christmas tree ornaments will look right at home dangling alongside the Bob Ross Funko Pop figure classing up my mantle. 'Tis the season for happy little trees and Deadpool 2 trailers</a