My bro in law, age 58, has congestive heart failure. He lives to travel and visit historical sites. They have been doing a cruise in Russia, staying in touch with his doctors by email. My sister takes good care of him, goes to all his doctor appointments, and got they got the ok from his cardiologist to travel that far.

They've been posting pix on FB of the beautiful sights. BIL has been tired a lot., not able to go on all the tours. He has been doing poorly and was coughing and coughing. He spat up blood. He was so tired. They called an ambulence and when they lay him on his back he couldn't breathe. My sister was trying to tell them to let him sit up when his eyes glazed over and he turned purple. They wouldn't let her be in the ambulence, or go to the hospital to be with him. They called to let her know he is alive and breathing on his own.

My sister called me crying having watched her husband almost die. Now it's early morning there and she is trying to rest. Hopefully she can see him in the hospital soon.

Is this normal for Russian hospitals not to let the spouse even wait in the waiting room?

At least he is in Moscow in a cardiac intensive care unit and not a small town like the ones they have passed on their river cruise.

Please send prayers and mojo to my dear sis and bil. He is the nicest guy and these are two lovebirds even after 19 years of. M. They tool the best care of me when I went through the D.

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

nowiknow23♀ 33226Member # 33226

Posted: 4:31 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2014

(((((BIL and Sis))))) How terrifying! Can she reach out to the American Consulate for help navigating this? There may also be expats in the area who could help understand how things work there? I'll be keeping them both in my thoughts.

You can call me NIK

“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön

Posts: 28330 | Registered: Aug 2011

Kajem♀ 36134Member # 36134

Posted: 4:47 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2014

Saying prayers. And ditto what NIK said, reach out to the US consulate.

(((((((Innerlight)))))))

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 6040 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida

Cally60♀ 23437Member # 23437

Posted: 5:57 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2014

In case you haven't already found it, this page has the relevant contact information, including out-of-hours phone numbers. (It specifically mentions help for US citizens during medical emergencies):

http://moscow.usembassy.gov/service.html

[This message edited by Cally60 at 5:58 PM, June 9th (Monday)]

Posts: 2219 | Registered: Mar 2009

Cally60♀ 23437Member # 23437

Posted: 6:17 PM, June 9th (Monday), 2014

Another thought.... Phone systems, ring tones, etc. in other countries can sometimes be confusing. (As anyone who's watched people struggling with the payphones at US airports probably knows.) Though cellphones help now, obviously.

My grandfather had to be admitted emergently in Minsk in the 1990s. They took very good care if him and from the pictures he took it didn't look as nice at the medical school hospital but was very comparable to the VA I trained at.

I think they will take good care of him. Moscow is a world class city and I'm sure the doctors are good. My sister has been communicating with her husband's doctors and I think the russian doctors are talking to the american doctors.

I just don't understand why they won't let her go to the hospital to see him. It's 9am in the morning there, so hopefully that will be resolved soon.

I gave her the numbers for the us consulate in moscow. Thanks Cally.

Fingers crossed this all works out...

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

InnerLight♀ 19946Member # 19946

Posted: 7:16 AM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

Got an email from sister saying he is in a medically induced coma and they are letting her visit.

This does not look good. My sister is half way around the world dealing with this. If it was in the US I would be in the car driving to get to her side.

I will look into traveling there but I'm not sure I can do that...

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 18104 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada

InnerLight♀ 19946Member # 19946

Posted: 9:28 AM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

Thanks for the good thoughts.

I just talked to my sister. She is haunted by watching the ambulance workers lie her husband down and him saying he couldn't breathe and trying to tell them that he had to sit up but they didn't understand her. Then he turned purple.

She has had this happen before in the US, and they kept him sitting upright.

It is an hour drive in bumper to bumper traffic to get to the hospital, and she is so upset thinking of him in that long ambulance ride, and now alone in that hospital.

She is worried about brain damage and that he will never fully recover. They say he has brain activity. Alpha and Theta (I think) waves.

She can't eat, she can't sleep. She is a very calm, confident, together person, but this is too much. I feel for her. It reminds me of how I felt after DDay.

I might have to fly out there to be with her, and I will drop everything in a minute if I have to. My sister is my closest person in the world.

I am so glad I told BIL I loved him last I spoke to him on the phone just after his mother passed a week before their trip.

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

nowiknow23♀ 33226Member # 33226

Posted: 9:30 AM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

((((((IL, sis, BIL)))))))

You can call me NIK

“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön

Posts: 28330 | Registered: Aug 2011

jo2love♀ 31528Member # 31528

Posted: 4:50 PM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

(((Inner, Sister, and BIL)))

Keeping all of you in my heart and thoughts. Sending mojo.

Posts: 38292 | Registered: Mar 2011

InnerLight♀ 19946Member # 19946

Posted: 6:06 PM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

My BIL's american cardiologist is talking to the russian cardiologist and working on arranging a medi-evac.

He says that the heart issue is manageable, it's not knowing how long he was without oxygen and if he has brain damage that is the big question.

I've dug out my passport and packed in case I get called on to go. Right now just waiting to find out when/where/if of medievac.

Do I cancel my weekend workshop I've arranged? I guess I do...

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

purplejacket4♀ 34262Member # 34262

Posted: 6:27 PM, June 10th (Tuesday), 2014

Yes cancel. You'll be too worried to get anything out if it and you'll want to travel to wherever BIL ends up.

Thanks PJ. I am the workshop leader and I hate canceling on people. I will give it another day as it is not clear if they can get him out soon... Or if there is a delay due to insurance.

Insurance may not cover medi-evac due to pre-existing condition...they may take a while to decide...

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

InnerLight♀ 19946Member # 19946

Posted: 12:58 PM, June 11th (Wednesday), 2014

It's so hard on my sister. Her cruise friends leave today and soon she will be alone in Moscow.

She thinks her husband went too long without oxygen and will never come back whole.

This is heartbreaking and I wish I could just go. Still waiting to find out what city he will medi evac to and I will meet her there. Then she thinks we would unplug the ventilator and he may or may not die. He has a pacemaker. Would he stay alive longer as a veg with a pacemaker?

All prayers appreciated.

BS, now age 54, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years M and 20 together. In some ways I have not 'gotten over it'. But I am resilient and have created a good life where I am mostly happy.

Posts: 6083 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California

Jrazz♀ 31349Member # 31349

Posted: 1:08 PM, June 11th (Wednesday), 2014

Sending good thoughts, prayers, mojo... everything.

(((InnerLight and family)))

"All the wars, all the hatred, all the ignorance in the world come out of being so invested in our opinions. And at bottom, those opinions are merely our efforts to escape the underlying uneasiness of being human. - Pema Chodron

Posts: 20916 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California

hexed♀ 19258Member # 19258

Posted: 6:52 PM, June 11th (Wednesday), 2014

((IL))

Sending you all the good vibes and prayers I've got right now. How terrifying for all of you.

But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler