Your life is on the verge of significant change. You and the person who you have spent the last chapter of your life with are going your separate ways, bringing on a multitude of emotions. Excitement, anger, grief and happiness are all expected throughout the divorce process. Anxiety from the unknown will also keep many people up at night, especially leading up to the mandatory settlement conference.

What Is a Mandatory Settlement Conference?

A Mandatory Settlement Conference (MSC) is a judge-ordered meeting to try to reach an agreement between two opposing sides. It is not required of every divorce, as default cases and those that can come to an agreement will not find any use in an MSC. This session is for divorcing couples who are unable to agree on divorce terms and have not found full relief in alternative methods, such as mediation. Along with their attorneys, both parties will meet in one session, or multiple sessions, if needed, to reach an agreement on complex matters. A “pro tem” or temporary judge will oversee the discussion and will attempt to help the couple reach a final agreement. If MSC does not resolve the controversy, then a trial will commence the following week, and the judge will decide the terms of everything left undecided.

If you are in the middle of splitting up with your spouse, you may be searching for the best possible resolution options for yourself. Once you are certain that this is the end of your marriage but want to forgo a lengthy and expensive divorce proceeding in court, a viable option for you may be mediation. Mediation has many positive advantages and can be the right choice for you.

What Is Mediation?

If you and your spouse are having difficulty agreeing to a property division, child support, visitation, or even spousal support/alimony, consider mediation. Understand that if you go in front of a judge, that judge must follow the law in making decisions. In mediation, the mediator will listen to both sides of the story and help to find a solution agreeable to both parties.

A dissolution of marriage, also known as a divorce, is a very emotional situation. Regardless of whether it is joy, anger, sadness or stress, both sides are very likely to be running on an extreme version of whatever their emotional reaction is. Unfortunately, emotions tend to cloud our logical thought processes, making subjects like dividing up the property even more difficult. Yet, countless couples overcome these obstacles on a daily basis, and we assure you that you will, too.

Your Checklist

Every divorce is different, however, the property list is nearly always fairly similar. While your actual checklist may vary from the following list slightly, some of the major highlights could still be present. Here is a list of assets that divorcing spouses should discuss in terms of how they are willing to divide them:

Choosing to split from your significant other is not a matter that should be taken lightly. It is a serious life-altering event that should be treated as such. However, it does not necessarily need to be a war between spouses either. There are several options for conflict resolution during a divorce to help make the process a bit more amicable.

The Object of Divorce

Many people focus on the overall objective when thinking of divorce. It is a split between a marriage or partnership. Yet, it entails more than just going two separate ways. Two lives have been woven together for years and now must strand by strand be unraveled from each other to ultimately become two separate entities once more. A dissolution of marriage is ultimately breaking apart everything encompassed in the matrimonial bond. Some of the issues that may have to be addressed are:

Divorce does not have to be a knockdown, drag-out fight. There is a common misconception that all divorce is ugly and bitter, between two people who absolutely despise each other and have no idea why they even married in the first place. While, this does occur occasionally, many times it is a somber time where two people who genuinely cared for each other just could not make forever happen, at neither parties fault. For situations such as these, there are amicable divorce options.

"Amicable" and "Divorce" Really Do Belong Together

Divorce litigation can be timely and costly. You have spent an untold amount of time being at odds with your partner. No one wants to cope with having months and potentially years of arguing as an added stressor just to have things end. If you are capable of a civil conversation with each other, you can opt to work together for a common goal. Think of the divorce as a "peace treaty" to negotiate rather than how you can hurt the other person. If both can agree on terms, both parties win in the long run. If both sides can agree on all terms, both can save money in court fees as well as have everything processed sooner with little to no courtroom time.