One-Eyed Jack

Monday, April 13, 2009

so you know you're famous when anything with your face or name on it sells.

i went into 711 to get an apple. they had obama water. straight up, the packaging, the set-up, everything was cheap. the people who come up with these products are probably making bank with it. you smart fucks...

here are some other products that you might encounter.

if i could morally force myself to sell this to people, this would be my shit right here. CHI CHI CHI CHIA, SON!

i noticed that i read that twice and couldnt help thinking that the obamania potentially sounded like a STD.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

its raining outside after God-knows-how-many days of scorching heat. Nice change of pace. I'm sorry I haven't been updating but dancing has been taking over my life. Vibe is here and I can't wait to perform. See you guys there.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Some words just need to be put to rest. If you were ever around the garbage that the radio spews out, you probably heard phrases or words that artists/rappers banked on to get them through an otherwise bland year in music.

Swag/SwaggerI dont know how many songs contain this word but if you're like me, you probably got sick of hearing it after the first time. Made infamous by the "Swagger Like Us" track, it just snowballed from there.My personal favorite is Hot Dolla - "Switch Ya Swagger Up". Hot Dolla really does need to switch it up cause he looks like a walking black male stereotype. Does this guy look like he's got swagger? Crotch grabbing's a good look, son.

Go Hard/Going HardDamn, I know how much you like to "go hard", Khaled but damn! Maybe its just a bit too much, you think? When I started hearing this phrase, I thought it was a cool phrase but me, I could never pull it off. As soon as DJ Khaled put it on a beat, it became the THING to say.

I can't hate on ya, Khaled; you make some NASTY beats. Those polos go HARD though, Joey. You gotta tell me where you got them.

It Ain't Trickin If You Got ItNow this phrase, I shouldn't even have to explain it. cause everyone knows..

Foreign MoneyAs if rappers regurgitating a millie million ways to describe money wasnt enough..If you really think about it, it wasnt till late of this year that people decided that dead presidents couldnt satisfy their need for ridiculous ways to talk about money. Gotta move on to that new shit if the shit you're on is worth less than its Canadian counterpart. (I wouldnt even wanna compare the USD to the Euro lol)

Arab Money sounds mighty delicious right now. TITTY TANKS IN 2009!!Autotune/Auto VocodersOh My Lord, this shit needs to die. I know this isnt a word or phrase in a song but I can't be the only one out there that thinks it got old. FAST.

Zapp & Roger - Dope

T-Pain - Dope

Kanye West/Lil Wayne/Ron Brows - NOPE!

THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR MAKING US SUFFER FROM YOUR GARBLED VOICE.

Nothing like a crowd singing "Pop Champagne" to his well-deserved trip.