That lady deserves a man who is loving, caring, and um… SEXUALLY interested in her!

LOLz!

Jessica Simpson's mother Tina must be craving a fresh slab of tasty man-meat following her divorce from husband Joe Simpson, especially since he reportedly CHEATED on her with MEN throughout their marriage…

So Jessica has decided to help her mother out by urging the Simpson matriarch to start dating again!

BUT there is one minor stipulation… Jess gets to PICK Tina's potential suitors! HA!

One insider close to the situation reveals:

"Jessica thinks it’s about time Tina started enjoying herself and has urged her to date. She thinks it’s the best way to get over her heartbreak with Joe and she needs to get out there and meet other men. However, Jessica has told Tina that she will help her pick who she goes on dates with. So, Jessica will personally screen the guys she dates by joining them on lunch or dinner engagements first! It’s her way of protecting her mom. Jessica doesn’t want to see her get hurt again and is also worried that she could get taken advantage of."

Awwww this sounds like an adorably awkward mother-daughter bonding activity.

Oh man, this is JUST the sort of HIGHlarious material that Jessica can include in her NBC scripted pilot!

But seriously, we can't imagine what it's like being MARRIED to someone who isn't even attracted to your gender, let alone YOU, for so many years!

Poor Tina.

But hey, at least she's got the support — and apparently the dating assistance — of her lovely daughter, who will hopefully be able to find her a non-gay boyfriend!

A new Bill Cosby accuser's story of how he allegedly sexually assaulted her after drugging her drink is horrifying.

According to Patricia, -- who decided to keep her last name anonymous -- Bill invited her to a dinner party in 1978 after they met at a conference... a dinner party that ended up just being the two of them: