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Twas the night before the playoffs (haters version)

Twas the night before playoffs, when all through the forum
not a person was sleeping due to geezers snorin.
The banners were hung by the shoutbox with care
knowing that the playoffs soon would be there.

Bball and Brichard were lying in bed with visions of
Reggie dancing in their heads.
And Scott H in his uni and Doug in his hat had both
given up for they no longer gave a crap.

When onto the forum there arose such a clatter
ABA lept from bed to see what was the matter
Away to the shoutbox he flew like a flash
but infirmity of age made him fall on his ***

The moon shining on Kegboys throwback flojo
just reminded them more how this new team does blow,
when, what to their wondering eyes should appear
but a giant hayfilled bandwagon drawing ever near.

With a young hip driver, ever bustling, not rude
they new in a moment it was Dat Dude
more fierce than grizzlys his drivers they came
he whistled and shouted and called them by name

"Now Armstrong, now Saras!
now Baston, now Jackson
On, big Al ! On, Josh Powell !
On, Granger and Jermaine!
To the top of the forum!
To the top of all ball
Now fast break! Now fast break!
Fast breaks for them all!

As good shots are foreign to good old A.I.
Dat Dude shook and they took to the sky
up to the top of the forum they did go
with both Lord Helmet and SoupIsGood
firmly in tow.

and then loud dancing was heard on top of the forum
as Able and Frank Slade came down before him
As Geezer stirred and began to come around
out of the shoutbox Dat Dude came with a bound

He was dressed in gold and blue, from his head to his foot
with an O'Neal tat on his shoulder knocking Pistons kapoote
with a bundle of jerseys thrown over his back
he laughed at their faces as he opened his pack

His bling--how it twinkled! His doo rag how merry
he looked right at Uncle Buck and called him a cherry!
His mouth when it opened it looked like an "O"
as he wondered aloud about geezers hair that was like snow!
The stump of his hookah he held not so flimsy
cause the stuff he was puffing came from Tinsley
He laughed at the old men and the size of their bellys
and danced in place while listning to Nelly

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
and changed all of the banners with one giant jerk.
With white dust from Tinsley hanging onto his nose
he laughed and he giggled as he stepped on Rcarys toes

He jumped in the wagon, to his team gave a whistle
and away they flew faster than a missle
But he was heard to exclaim 'ere he flew out of sight.

"The playoffs are coming, step up your life!!!"

My real apologies to Clement Clarke Moore

Later I will do Twas the night before the playoffs (fanboy version)

Basketball isn't played with computers, spreadsheets, and simulations. ChicagoJ 4/21/13