I was diagnosed with grade 3 breast cancer on 14 Feb and have since had surgery to remove two large tumours. For me that was the easy part, despite all the worries, trauma and upset being diagnosed entails. For me the worst is to come - 6 months of chemo followed by 6 weeks of daily radiotherapy (bar weekends). I count myself lucky that the cancer has not spread but I am terrified of what the treatment will do to me mentally as well as physically. Since being diagnosed I've not looked ill and nobody would know to look at me that I am a cancer sufferer. All that is about to change big time. Any help or advice from a fellow sufferer would be much appreciated.

Hi Maria
Any diagnosis of cancer is hard to come to terms with, the first few weeks are perhaps mentally "easier" in that there seems so much to cope with, there is little time to think. You will have seen that a number of our Forum members have breast cancer and I hope that, through them, this Forum will give you support through the weeks and months to come. Do not be backward in voicing your fears, your frustrations, your ups and downs - no-one here will think any the less of you. Many of us have been there too.

And don't forget that you can get support from Cancer Support France in a more personal way by contacting your local association. The associations are all listed on the Forum and, if there is not one close to you, do contact CSF National who can arrange for telephone support. Or drop me a note by PM or e-mail.

We have every conceivable sympathy for anyone who has unfortunately to post on this forum. Tragic that the necessity is there in the first place, so not wishing to be one of those contributors who posts once and then forgets, may I say that we feel deeply for you in your physical and psychological struggles.
However, and I hope I am not going to be too controversial here - spare a wee thought for the carers. They are also going through every form of hell. Never one to have much hair in the first place, what remains of mine is falling out in chunks. Added to which, the patient has fortunately not lost any weight, but I have! Gone down from 45 kgs [not much to start with] to 42 kgs due to all the stress. OK so I am not the "victim" here but for those who have to support the patients, both physically and mentally, spare us a thought too - and thanks in advance for that.

Maria, I finished my radiotherapy ((after chemotherapy) in early December, and I've recently had my first post-treatment mammogram, which was clear. I waited until my hair startedto come out (around fifteen days from the first session of chemo) and then my daughter shaved it. I bought wigs and various scarves, and can honestly say that have never had so many compliments as when I wore my wig! If I wanted to go for the sympathy vote, I put a scarf on. Life had to be put on hold - although I only had side effects on the fourth day of the second type of chemotherapy (taxoterre) - when I got griping stoach pains and had to get some 'spasfon' from the doctor. Otherwise the actual treatment day was just boring! I suggest you get an ipad, smart phone, kindle or whatever will keep you occupied for two - three hours. The radiotherapy was just a fifteen minute in and out - and my hospital had special parking spaces reserved for radiotherapy patients. I drove myself the whole time - 50 km each way, so ended up with a nice reimbursement in lieu of taking taxis (it's how I bought my ipad). The worst thing about the radiotherapy is that it was impossible to get into a routine, since each appointment could be at a different time - you are given a card at the end of each week with the appointments for the following week. I abadoned my strict diet during chemoherapy, and actually put on around 10 kilos - now trying to get that off! So, nobody need actually know unless you want them to. You do get lots of comments about 'how brave you are' or 'you are fighting it' but in reality there seems to be little that you can actually do that will influence the outcome, other than adhering to the course of treatment. Others may disagree with me! I don't know where you are, but I had a 'buddy' who was going through a similar process about six weeks ahead of me - so could give me relevant information about my particular hospital, and the consultants. Maybe if there is a CSF covering your area they might know of someone in that situation? I'm happy to help if I can - send me a pm with your contact details if you wish. I am lucky because I have an outlet for my creativity in fused glass - and that helps to keep my mind occupied - but you are bound to have dark episodes, just stick with it!