Accumulate

In a cave at the bottom of the world lies a pile of gold. Strewn over its bricks and ducats are treasures of unrivaled rarity, statues of unparalleled casting, yellowed parchments bound by notes of unequalled composition. In the cave glitter the pearls of wisdom cast before swine, when moonlight, reflected in the pools of silver, shines into its mouth. All manner of things that make a man rich may be found in that place, the accumulation thereof and its accumulator mysteries old as the world is old, in history deep as the cavern is deep. If perchance you reach its mouth without succumbing to the dangers that guard it, prepare to brave what lurks within. For the cave’s final treasure is life itself, that most precious commodity, and none who enter may return by the same path.

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"All the while I have been forgetting the third of my reasons for remaining so faithful a citizen of the Federation, despite all the lascivious inducements from expatriates to follow them beyond the seas, and all the surly suggestions from patriots that I succumb. It is for the reason which grows out of my medieval but unashamed taste for the bizarre and indelicate, my congenital weakness for comedy of the grosser varieties. The United States, to my eye, is incomparably the greatest show on earth."