While it doesn't deserve to burn to a crisp in hell, burning the soles of its feet with lighted cigarettes should prove a suitable punishment. It's almost as if the licence has held back any attempts on the developer's part to inject any depth or gameplay. Although there was plenty of scope in the storyline of the film to include more features, you can't help but feel that the programmers decided to cut their losses and get the game out. The end result is rather like the film: enjoyable enough at the time, but instantly forgettable.

Amidst the tidal wave of fresh and innovative real-time wargames already washing up on shore, Waterworld barely manages to keep its head above water. By lashing together commonplace and repetitive gameplay with a tale as tall as they come, Waterworld should be cast adrift and never seen or heard from again.

Waterworld deserves a spot on every human being's shelf. Any title next to it instantly looks great. Its inspiring prose outperforms the average junior high school yearbook. It might not be your destination, but this "dry land" has all it needs to be your next Destiny. If for no other reason, buy it to preserve its constitutional right to be "BITCHIN!"