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Thursday, October 13, 2011

Dress Up in You

Yesterday I got an interesting phone call. Let's say that someone in the office of an important person - let's call the important person "The Movernor Meneral" - heard me on the CBC. Let's say that this person was interested in my GG project. Let's say this person wanted to invite me to attend a celebration next month for a certain book award. A party in Ottawa. Let's say this party was at a little house called "Mideau Mall". Let's say I fell over and had a heart attack.

When I recovered, I emailed my associates, and received some hearty well donesand good jobs, and the assurance of my mom that the eats would be good. Leave it to my savvy sister in law to immediately ask the most important question, "what are you going to wear??"

As H. is well-aware, I have no clothes. Nothing. Very sad. I also have no shoes, but that's another story. What does one wear to celebrations at "Mideau Mall"?

Because I'm cursed, my favorite is the most expensive - "Tangerine Flicker Dress". I don't know if I can bring myself to pay that much money on a dress. Also, I haven't tried it, or any of these on. Also, I haven't booked my ticket, or confirmed my attendance, and I don't really know what the expected attire is.

Obviously, I'm also terrified of this adventure. I'm not good at schmoozing, especially not with literati types. What if I drop a canape down Margaret Atwood's blouse? That could happen. I could pat Michael Ondaatje's beard. I might do that anyway. Assuming he's invited. This is pretty exclusive.