Washington Post photo by Linda Davidson

My friend John Nichols has done very well for himself writing for progressive audiences. But every now and then, I feel like I should call over to make sure he has proper ventilation in his office. (I am worried about you, John.)

That occurred Monday when I saw Nichols' ruminations on the Nov. 5 election results, in which Republican New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie retained his job in a landslide and fellow Republican Ken Cuccinelli narrowly lost the Virginia governorship to former Democratic National Committee chair Terry McAuliffe. Nichols fashions a fairly novel explanation as to how Christie won and Cuccinelli lost:

"Virginia Republican gubernatorial candidate Ken Cuccinelli counted on Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker to provide the conservative candidate with some of the 'star power' he needed to get him elected November 5.

"It didn't work. ...

"On the day Walker arrived in Virginia, an Emerson College poll had Cuccinelli within two points of union-backed Democrat Terry McAuliffe. But Walker didn't close the gap. His campaigning for Cuccinelli fell short, as did the Virginia contender — who lost his race by more than 55,000 votes.

"In the race where a Republican won, Walker was notably absent.

"Though he was on the East Coast, Walker was not invited for a final weekend surrogate swing in New Jersey to campaign for Republican Governor Chris Christie. Though he campaigned for Walker in 2010 and 2012, Christie did not appear to be seeking to associate himself with the Wisconsinite as Christie was organizing a re-election run that was managed with an eye toward jump-starting the New Jersey governor's own Republican presidential bid."

Just take a moment to let Nichols' implication sink in. Walker showed up in Virginia, and Cuccinelli lost; Walker didn't go to New Jersey, and Christie won. Lest you believe Nichols isn't implying causation, the headline of his article is "The Scott Walker Effect: Helping Democrats Win and Republicans Lose."

First of all, Nichols is a smart guy, and he can't possibly believe a one-day pit stop from a governor of a state halfway across the country makes one iota of a difference in a bruising election that at that point had been fought for over a year. Even if it is true that Walker has national ambitions, the 150 people who showed up at his appearance on Saturday morning with Cuccinelli wasn't a disastrous turnout.

Indeed, I love Nichols' wording when he says "Walker was not invited" to New Jersey. Was anyone invited? Who would go campaign in a state where the incumbent was up 25%, when they could help another candidate who was in a dogfight? As far as I can tell, Borat also wasn't invited — one can only logically deduce that Christie was trying to distance himself from people with giant mustaches.

Remember when Bill Clinton showed up for Tom Barrett just days before Wisconsin's recall election? I missed the Nichols column implying that Barrett's loss was an embarrassing rebuke of the Clinton years, driving voters toward the GOP.

Further, the polls said these two races were cooked well before last weekend. Christie won by 24.1% of the vote; the Real Clear Politics average had him up by over 30% for most of July. (So, by Nichols' reasoning, maybe Walker's absence hurt Christie?)

Cuccinelli, on the other hand, was down between 7% and 10% in the Real Clear Average for all of October and ended up losing by a slim 2.5%. Again, Walker's visit made absolutely no difference. But if anyone wanted to argue that it did, they would have to argue that it helped close the gap in the final days.

(Nichols also laughably suggested that Democrat Bill DeBlasio's win as New York mayor was due to his "rejection of Walker-style governing." In a race that DeBlasio won by 49 percentage points. Good grief.)

I am envious of Nichols' prolificacy; but writing as much as he does has its downside. Squeezing a full story out of a one-morning Walker campaign drop-in is beyond a stretch. As is the case with most things in life, I would offer up some Ron Burgundy-inspired advice: www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfbQDW2HvrY