SATIRE

Guide to rejecting someone (for people who can't say no)

For some of us, getting rejected is like a nightmare. Nothing can be worse than putting ourselves out there and not having our feelings reciprocated. I totally sympathise with this since. I, myself, would never own up to my feelings in fear of not being on the same page with the other person.

But being on the other side of this scenario, and actually having to reject someone is not a walk in the park either. Okay, you know what, it is actually a walk in the park because I hate walking in parks, or just walking anywhere really and would literally do anything to avoid it. So, if you also hate walking in parks and face a scenario where you have to take a walk in the park, what do you do?

You would naturally not get out of the house, right? Let's use this analogy in the rejection situation as well. If rejecting someone seems unpleasant to you, you don't do it. It's as simple as that. Look into those innocent eyes, ready to give you their whole world. Do they really deserve the harsh truth? Think of how happy it'll make them falsely imagining that you also feel the same way towards them. For the time being, you won't have to take “a walk in the park” and the future unpleasantness that will follow for being in a relationship with a person that you don't have feelings for is really a job for your future self only.

So, the right way to reject someone is to not reject them at all and to repress your actual feelings just so you don't have to deal with the momentary unpleasantness. Maybe, after years of hiding your actual feelings, you'll somehow convince yourself that you actually like this person? Seems too complicated? Well, it's still easier then actually explaining to them that even though they're a wonderful human being you just don't feel the same way towards them. And that they actually deserve someone who cares for them just as much. Right? Or am I just too extra? Guess we'll never know.

Tasnim Odrika likes pineapple on pizza and is willing to fight anyone who opposes her on this. Reach her at odrika_02@yahoo.com