Jimmy Fallon (as Trump) Meets the Press

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Jimmy Fallon opening “The Tonight Show” as President Trump. “We’ve made so much progress,” he said. “In fact, if you ask any American, they’ll say that I’ve managed to make the last four weeks feel like four years.”CreditNBC

Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the funniest jokes and videos and the sharpest monologues and parodies from the comedy shows. We’ve got your back: You need sleep, after all, andsomething to smile about, while we’re getting paid to watch late night, which is insane.

Fallon on the Presidential Podium

Jimmy Fallon spoofing the news conference, the source of many jokes on late-night television.CreditThe Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

President Trump’s 77-minute solo news conference, his first since his inauguration, was fodder for an array of jokes and skits Thursday night. Jimmy Fallon opened “The Tonight Show” with a spoof. Here are some choice quotes:

“First of all, you’re all fake news, I hate you all very much, and thank you for being here. First question? No. Next.”

“We’ve made so much progress. In fact, if you ask any American, they’ll say that I’ve managed to make the last four weeks feel like four years. Four more weeks! Four more weeks!”

“I’m not even calling it fake news anymore. I’ve thought of something new. I changed the name. I’m now calling it faux news. Much classier if you think about it. Very classy. F-a-u-x. It’s not pronounced ‘fox.’”

Colbert Puts on a Despot’s Hat

Drawing inspiration from Genghis Khan and other “ferocious despots,” Stephen Colbert donned a “big furry hat,” one of his favorite props, then declared: “I really feel like giving a press conference.” He proceeded to issue some “proclamations”:

“From this day forward, if someone at a cocktail party says, ‘Here’s something interesting,’ what they say must be something interesting.”

“Let us all agree that vaping was a phase and never speak of it again.”

“If you get married in Cleveland, you may not call it a destination wedding. You must call it a layover wedding.”

“Kim Jong-un’s next ballistic missile must be aimed at the guy who gave him that haircut.”

“Starting Monday, ‘Presidents’ Day sale’ means the president is for sale. Free shipping if you also take Steve Bannon.”

Mr. Colbert went after the president’s news conference more directly in his opening monologue. “It was a robust one hour and 17 minutes long,” he said. “That is beefy. So beefy, you could eat it with a fork, but you’re gonna want to use a spoon — to get every drop of the crazy.”

Stephen Colbert tackled the news conference more directly, in his monologue.CreditThe Late Show With Stephen Colbert

Jimmy Kimmel’s Long Three Weeks

Jimmy Kimmel didn’t go for a Trump-related skit, but he fit in more than his share of zingers about the president’s news conference.

“He was mad. He talked for an hour and 17 minutes, which is more than he’s spoken to Melania all this year.”

“You know it’s a bad press conference when assuming all black people know each other wasn’t even the worst part of it. It’s been a long three weeks. I’ve been doing this show for 14 years, the only time I can remember this much craziness was when Charlie Sheen was on that winning streak.”

“‘The leaks are real but the news is fake.’ That’s like saying the boobs are real, but the implants are fake. The toupee is real but the hair is fake.”

Referring to the recent announcement that scientists had discovered a distant planet with earthlike qualities, Mr. Kimmel quipped: “This might not be the best time to make contact with aliens. They say, ‘Take us to your leader’ — what do we do at that time? ‘Our leader’s a little busy on Twitter right now. How about we take you to Oprah? She’s nice, you’ll like her.’”

The Conversation: Sally Field Praises Colbert

The actress Sally Field, who was on “The Late Show” to talk about her role in “The Glass Menagerie” on Broadway, took a moment to offer her thanks to Mr. Colbert for his work. Inevitably, the conversation circled to Mr. Trump.

FIELD: The comedy that you’re doing, and several others, is so incredibly valuable and important — to see that kind of satire. It really is.

COLBERT: Thank you very much. By several others you mean my reruns, right?

FIELD: Yes, all your reruns.

COLBERT: Me and my reruns. All of us together. It’s not just me. It’s all of my reruns.

FIELD: Yes. All the different characters you bring to life.

COLBERT: Thank you very much. Well, it’s fun. You know, I enjoy doing the show because it makes me feel better. I’d go crazy if I couldn’t come here. Same reason he held a press conference: Like, he’d go crazy if he couldn’t talk to people.

FIELD: And he goes crazy when he talks to people. It’s kind of a constant.

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The actress Sally Field appeared on Mr. Colbert’s show to discuss her role on Broadway in “The Glass Menagerie,” but the conversation inevitably circled to Mr. Trump.CreditCBS

‘You Don’t Know All Orange People’

The hosts took aim at Mr. Trump’s response to April Ryan, a black reporter, during his news conference. When she asked him whether he would seek input from the Congressional Black Caucus on his plans to address urban crime, he asked whether its members were friends of hers and suggested that she set up the meeting for him.

“It’s racist to assume all black people know each other. You don’t know all orange people. ‘Hey Donald, can you set up a meeting with Snooki and the Lorax?’” — SETH MEYERS

“‘Are they friends of yours? Are they? Did you all grow up in the hood together? Huh? Huh? While you’re at it, I’ve been trying to get in touch with Frederick Douglass, can you invite him to the meeting too? He embarrassed me bigly.’” — TREVOR NOAH, impersonating Mr. Trump

The Punchiest Punchlines (News Conference Edition)

“Donald Trump held his first solo press conference as president. He’s had them with world leaders. He’s gone out there and shared the twin podiums with the world leaders, but this was just him by himself. Evidently, he didn’t even bring his meds with him.” — COLBERT

“Not only does Trump look miserable, but check out Bibi Netanyahu. He has a face like, ‘Should I go?’ Being a world leader sitting with Trump right now is like being a woman on a date with a guy, and then his wife shows up screaming: ‘Your kids want to know where you are!’ [glances around] ‘I just got asked out to dinner.’” — MEYERS

Seth Meyers had a word for the day’s main event: “bizarre.”CreditLate Night With Seth Meyers

The Bits Worth Watching

The parents of the host James Corden heading to the Grammy Awards.CreditThe Late Late Show With James Corden

The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show reimagined with Mr. Trump as the announcer. CreditThe Late Show With Stephen Colbert

Farewell for This Week

That’s all we’ve got for you this week. We at the Times Late-Night Comedy Committee sincerely hope you’ve been enjoying these rundowns. Don’t hesitate to send us any feedback. Have a great weekend, and we’ll see you back here next week.