Archive for December, 2009

Add Blake Lively and red carpet events, and it would be no surprise that you’d see her in either ultra-low cut cleavage-revealing or ultra-short leggy dresses. In the Sherlock Holmes movie premiere, you got both! Here’s Blake Lively looking very classy and conservative in a see-though seemingly lingerie dress. Yes, that was sarcastic.

Blake is extremely sexual in every way possible and she knows it. That’s why she grabs every opportunity to flaunt her hot body. Maybe to get more attention? Well, as a young celebrity you need every attention you can get to stay in the limelight. Maybe to seduce more men because she’s damn tired of her boyfriend Penn Badgely‘s boner? Well, she’s quite damn successful with that part.

One piece of advice for Blake: enough with the teasing. if you’re that hot and sexy, why not flaunt some more? We promise we’ll be kind in imagining you in every hardcore position there is. Pretty please?

Harry Potter star and now Brown University freshman Emma Watson was in Jamaica hitting the beach a few days ago. Nothing much, really, except that SHE WAS SO DAMN HOT IN HER BLACK BIKINI. Oh well. No biggie, I just jerked off twice, because SHE WAS SO FUCKING HOT. Maybe even thrice if I’ll count that one where a neighbor barged in my room unexpectedly and suddenly cum was all over the place.

Isn’t it a great feeling to know that your feelings are purely legitimate now because she’s not underaged anymore? Yeah. Unlike how pervy you feel whenever you see Miley Cyrus in skimpy slutty clothes, shaking her butt like a stripper. In Emma Watson’s case, having a hard on and masturbating to her hot pictures is purely legal. No criminal or moral offense taken.

So anyway, I hope Emma goes out more looking like this. Or maybe even topless next time. I wouldn’t also mind if she gets breast implants anytime soon. Not that I’m complaining about her ample breasts, it’s just that two cups bigger is always nicer.