Take Something Off: How To Get The Life And Career You Really Want

There was a magnetic force in the room on the night I met Agapi Stassinopoulos. Actually, she was the magnetic force—I was leaning in, wanting to connect with her positive energy as she talked about her personal journey behind her book, Wake Up to the Joy of You: 52 Meditations and Practices for a Calmer, Happier Life. It’s a transformational guide to giving up what doesn’t work and creating the life you really want.

Stassinopoulos and her sisterArianna Huffingtonwere brought up in Greece and they credit their mother for teaching them how to be fearless, generous and to trust in themselves and in life. But the real life-changer happened when Stassinopoulos was a struggling actress in New York City and a stranger told her to stop waiting for her big break and to make things happen to herself. That’s when she found her calling and purpose that set her on a new journey.

Here’s an excerpt from our Mentoring Moments podcast, a big tip about how to get unstuck. Like when you say, “I don’t like my job” or “I don’t like my relationship.” When you think, “I want the next thing,” but don’t know how to figure out what your next thing is. Stassinopoulos says that’s a very real place to be and she has the keys to get to the next thing, including why we all need to take a deep breath, then take something off (in her words condensed and edited):

Mika Brzezinski, Agapi Stassinopoulos, and Isabella Huffington attend THRIVE: A Third Metric Live Event at New York City Center. (Photo by D Dipasupil/Getty Images)

On my book tour I met Jacki who is a lawyer. She said: “I am so successful. I have this amazing career, but I'm miserable. I hate going to the office. I hate doing litigation. I hate being a lawyer, but this is my career. What do I do?”

First of all, don't be so stuck in anything. What if Jacki has a heart attack or is diagnosed with cancer or if something happens in her life that is a wakeup call? She would give up her work, take care of herself and do what she loves because suddenly life becomes precious. We live as if we’re going to live forever.

Lin-Manuel Miranda said something in his interview in his documentary on Hamilton that absolutely stopped me in my tracks. He said, “I embody the principles of Alexander Hamilton.” Alexander Hamilton believed that tomorrow is not promised. Therefore, you live for today. You summon up all your energy and your creativity. You're not afraid because when you only have today, what are you afraid of? You have nothing to lose. You give it your all.

We live as if tomorrow is promised. We live as if next year is promised. We live as if our 70's and 80's are promised. They're not promised. Nothing is promised.

We’re here right now. We need to stop the treadmills in our heads, our ambitions, and our longings. We need to really stop for a moment, breathe and say: “Let me look at this with a whole different perspective. What would I do differently?”

I asked Jackie, “What’s the thing you loved to do before your father said ‘go be a lawyer’ and you followed that path?” She said, “I love art. I love decorating. I love beautiful things.” I said, “Start to honor what you love and reconnect you to you. Take a sabbatical.”

A sabbatical can be a day, six weeks or six months. A sabbatical means you back away. You cut the cords. It means that you don’t go to the office every day. We all need to go beyond our limited self to something that’s available that you might not even know about because you are on that treadmill.

Jacki had enough cushion in her bank account to sustain herself so she could tell her firm, “I’m taking six weeks off.” Some people will say, “They will fire me if I do that.” Okay, take Sunday off. That’s your Sunday. Take a Sunday off where you just wander and ask yourself, “What do I love to do?” Whether it’s a Sunday, six weeks or six months—take something off.

To hear Stassinopoulos’ stories behind the quotes below and to get her email address so you can tell her what you think about “dream big,” take a listen to our podcast.

You can wear Spanx on your hips, not on your heart.

I stopped waiting for others to give me permission to express myself and my talents. That took courage.

In life, you’re either contracting or expanding.

When we override our wisdom and stop listening to what our self is telling us to do, we pay a price.

I took a sabbatical from men and realized that my path was to find myself and my calling.

Four magic words. “Can you help me?” Ask for advice.

Don't ever go to sleep without writing down three things you're grateful for.

We don't dare. We don't do what we want to do because we’re so afraid of failure.

This is Mentoring Moments—a series of stories about triumphs and skids from successful women. Mentoring Moments is now a podcast.

I am a storyteller, speaker, writer and connector. As the founder and CEO of GirlQuake, a Forbes Media contributor and host of the Forbes podcast, Mentoring Moments, I amplify the voices of females from multiple generations, redefining the notion of power. I’m the author of ...