Your Mother's a Fat Slag

Children can be so cruel. Won't they think of the mothers? Won't somebody think of the mothers?!

It's official - well, according to 13-year old little Jimmy Brennan it is. The pubic-faced ginger nonce has confirmed that Tony Smith's mother is a slag - and a fat one at that.

The troublesome teen made the bold statement round the back of the bike sheds yesterday to a delighted crowd of fat-assed schoolgirls and gormless boys with bum-fluff mustaches. The girls were said to have farted loudly in approval, while the boys spat on the ground in a sign of excitement and territorial exuberance.

Young Smith was not present at the time but his four-eyed friend George 'Goggles' Brown made notes on his dick with a pencil and later revealed all to his pal