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03 June 2014

Glass Houses

I would really like to share with you all a little thing that happened to me, a while ago I started creating these pendants, well the first one was because of one customer that asked if I could do something like this for them, well I wholeheartedly agreed to do so in return for payment they were to provide me with a service. Well I created my piece, they provided the service, should have been the end of it right? well no, you see when it came time to receive what I sent they decided to say it never was delivered; the item was tracked, it showed delivery. So we waited a couple of days see if it had been erroneously delivered to the neighbors, nothing, they said they contacted their rural post office who seemed to know nothing about the items disappearance, so what do I do as the creator and shipper, well I create another and contact Canada Post to cover the loss of the item. Within a week I have the other piece shipped out and the next week I get an email from Canada Post, explaining to me the result of their investigation is that this package has been delivered correctly, to which I respond with no I have emails from this person that state otherwise, so they ask me for copies which I provide. Two days later I receive a call from Canada Post and the very nice lady tells me well we have contacted your customer and low and behold the item is now there! how shocking! it seems once the post office actually called them they admitted they had the item. Now they have two items and provided one service......which in the end turned out to be done with copyrighted material and had to be taken down.......now ask me if that person took responsibility? ask me if they were honest about their underhanded dealing with me? if they actually even admitted it? no of course not, they made a donation covering one of the items to something I was doing, then they quietly let themselves fade into the circle of people I had already left behind and then deleted themselves from my profile......no I am sorry, no nothing. The truth being it was all part of a game to make me look bad that her and her friends were playing. Just like high school but with adults. No honor, no morals, just underhanded behavior and games to hurt another woman, another human being.The worst part of it for me it was a woman......one who knows how hard life can be, one that knows how hard us small business' work to get somewhere and instead of admitting she played a game to help out her friend who wanted to hurt me no she just slithered away.

Does it amaze anyone else in this world that we as human beings find every possible reason to excuse our bad behavior? we come up with cute stories with morals we didn't follow, justifications hang wildly in the wind, flaunting to the world that like always we do not have to take responsibility for our bad actions, misdeeds or even our untrue words that we uttered, no we do not have to take any ownership of any of that because we can excuse by finding some obscure quote, proverb or group of words that makes us feel secure in our mistreatment of each other. It amazes me to no end. It amazes me even more when women do it to women. Is life as a woman in this world not hard enough already? I mean we constantly fight against oppression from men, from the system run by men and by patriarchy as a whole really and somewhere in there women fail to consistently realize that their constant competition rather than support of each other is what causes most of our problems in society. Will it ever stop? there was a time in my life that I held hope for that, I firmly believed probably rather naively that women had each other's backs at the end of the day, well I think I was 6 at the time, so I now can forgive myself for being that naive.

See here is the thing, never in my life have I ever acted like I was perfect, made no mistakes or was better than anyone, if anything ask people who have known me for years.....I am the first to admit to my shortcomings, my issues and my own mistakes, I take my damn lumps and learn, move on, keep going and take those lessons and translate them into things that work for me and for my own circle of family.....maybe it is this way of doing things that makes it so very difficult for me to understand the ones that don't. In truth no matter how eloquently you describe the shit you have done, misplace the blame and put it on someone else the truth is your shit still smells like, well, you know shit, and it stinks to high heaven the more you go on and on about it while still throwing it at others. I sometimes wonder if they ever realize that the more they keep stirring the pot the more they keep bringing their own dirt to the surface?

Even with social media you cannot hide forever, eventually even the virtual corners of the internet become small for all the misdeeds you keep creating, commenting on and perpetuating. My advice stop pointing fingers and throwing stones when your glass house is full of holes already and accumulating shit faster than you can shovel.

So now that I have let that all out! back to my life and the wonderful people in it, because anyone that is in it is because I have allowed them to be, I learnt a lot from that little foray into the world of insecure women in social media, I tightened my boundaries and my borders and now only those worthy of friendship, truth and loyalty are let in...women that hand each other the steps when one might have a problem finding them alone, women that support each other's right to be, to create, to grow, to learn, to educate and to be more than just a nameless faceless vagina, I surround myself with authentic women and men, authentic people that know that first we are human and we should act as such.....the truth is I do not have time in my already full life to deal with anything but genuine human beings.

2 comments:

TRUTH! This is exactly what is wrong with society. No one ever takes responsibility for their mistakes or the issues they create. Instead of being responsible, they take an innocent situation and twist it into something so ugly and distorted there is no possible way to find the simple act from the beginning.

The whole thing is pathetic, really. The thing is that your 6 year old self had the truth, actually. You may have been naive, but often the word naive is used to put down someone who is idealistic. There's nothing wrong with being idealistic. It means you have a clear vision of how things ought to be, how they need to be. Women, ultimately, need to stand together, we must have each other's backs because if we don't who exactly can we count on in the crunch?