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| _ \ /\ | __ \ | |/ /| | | ____|\ \ / /
| |_) | / \ | |__) || ' / | | | |__ \ \_/ /
| _ < / /\ \ | _ / | < | | | __| \ /
| |_) |/ ____ \ | | \ \ | . \ | |____ | |____ | | _
|____//_/ \_\|_| \_\|_|\_\|______||______| |_| | )
|/
___ _ _ _ _ _____ _ _ ___ _ _ _ ___
/ __| || | | | |_ _| | | | | _ \ /_\ | \| | \
\__ \ __ | |_| | | | | |_| | _/ / _ \| .` | |) |
|___/_||_|\___/ |_| \___/|_| /_/ \_\_|\_|___/
_ _ __ __ _ ___ _ ___ ___ ___ _ _
_ | |/_\ | \/ | (_) / __| /_\ |_ _| \| __| \| |
| || / _ \| |\/| | _ | (_ |/ _ \ | || |) | _|| .` |
\__/_/ \_\_| |_| (_) \___/_/ \_\___|___/|___|_|\_|
C H A P T E R 1 O F T H E H O O P Z B A R K L E Y S A G A
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==============================================================================
BARKLEY, SHUT UP AND JAM: GAIDEN, CHAPTER 1 OF THE HOOPZ BARKLEY SAGA
FAQ/Walkthrough
Copyright (c)2008-2010 DomZ Ninja
==============================================================================
Author: DomZ Ninja
E-mail: domzninja[at]hotmail[dot]com
Updated: 05/03/10
Version: 1.0
NOTE: This guide does contain spoilers!
______________________________________________________________________________
TABLE OF CONTENTS
______________________________________________________________________________
See that series of numbers to the right of each section? If you want to find
a specific section in the FAQ, press CTRL + F to open a search box. Type in
the series of numbers for the desired section that you're trying to find and
press Enter. Whabam! The search function will take you there in an instant.
1] - Version History.................................. [0100]
2] - Controls......................................... [0200]
3] - Characters....................................... [0300]
4] - Walkthrough...................................... [0400]
4.01] Barkley's Apartment...................... [0401]
4.02] Neo New York............................. [0402]
4.03] B-Ball Catacombs......................... [0403]
4.04] Neo New York Sewers...................... [0404]
4.05] Cesspool X............................... [0405]
4.06] Neo New York............................. [0406]
4.07] Neo New York Sewers...................... [0407]
4.08] Proto Neo New York....................... [0408]
4.09] Spalding Factory......................... [0409]
4.10] Proto Neo New York....................... [0410]
4.11] Underground Railroad..................... [0411]
4.12] Liberty Island Ferry..................... [0412]
4.13] Liberty Island........................... [0413]
4.14] Barren Outskirts......................... [0414]
4.15] Cuchulainn's Tomb........................ [0415]
4.16] Barren Outskirts......................... [0416]
4.17] Necron 5................................. [0417]
5] - Sidequests....................................... [0500]
5.1] Dikembe Mutombo's Tomb.................... [0510]
5.2] Chup Mines................................ [0520]
5.3] Ghastly Darklord.......................... [0530]
5.4] B-Ball Dimension.......................... [0540]
5.5] Deathtemple............................... [0550]
6] - Bosses........................................... [0600]
7] - Equipment........................................ [0700]
7.1] Weapons................................... [0710]
7.2] Armor..................................... [0720]
7.3] Bling..................................... [0730]
8] - Items............................................ [0800]
9] - Thanks/Credits................................... [0900]
______________________________________________________________________________
1] VERSION HISTORY [0100]
______________________________________________________________________________
FAQ/Walkthrough #25
-------------------
Version 1.0 (02/14/08) - FAQ/Walkthrough complete and submitted.
______________________________________________________________________________
2] CONTROLS [0200]
______________________________________________________________________________
.-----------------------------.----------------------------------------------.
| Arrow Keys | Move |
|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------|
| Z | Interact |
|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------|
| X | Cancel, Run (Hold) |
|-----------------------------|----------------------------------------------|
| C | Open Menu |
'-----------------------------'----------------------------------------------'
Phew! I think you should be able to handle those controls.
______________________________________________________________________________
3] CHARACTERS [0300]
______________________________________________________________________________
==============================================================================
CHARLES BARKLEY
==============================================================================
One of the few surviving b-ballers from The Great B-Ball Purge, Charles
Barkley has been living a life of solitude ever since the tragic event in
2041. Now that basketball is forbidden, Barkley has been very depressed and
confused as ever. What lies in his future?
--- SPELLS -------------------------------------------------------------------
Doubleteam - Barkley's default ability can hit multiple times on one target.
Costs 10 BP to use.
Showboat Jam - This spell not only damaged a single enemy, but you will also
gain a boost in a random attribute. Costs 20 BP to use.
Learned at Level 2.
Vampslam - Barkley will leap in the air and slam down on a foe, sapping their
VP as he gains some back. Costs 10 BP to use. Learned at Level 4.
Holy Jam - This very powerful spell is only acquired after beating Dikembe
Mutumbo in his secret tomb. Costs 35 BP to use.
Ghost Muscle - This ability can be used to raise Barkley's BRAIN and POWER.
It's learned after defeating Ghost Dad. Costs 5 BP to use.
==============================================================================
BALTHIOS
==============================================================================
Balthios is the octaroon great grandson of Lebron James. He is a very wise,
old man and one of the last zaubermancers. Balthios is a friend of Barkley and
Hoopz, but never likes to talk about himself. Not much is really known about
Balthios.
--- SPELLS -------------------------------------------------------------------
Fire Zauber - When used, this default ability will lower a single enemy's
POWER for a short peroid of time. Costs 5 BP to use.
Ice Zauber - The powerful ability will deal great damage to a solo enemy.
Costs 20 BP to use.
Water Zauber - Use this spell to inflict Glaucoma and Diabetes on a group of
enemies. Costs 10 BP to use. Learned at Level 3.
Wind Zauber - Attacks a group of foes with wind, then ends the attack with a
powerful slash. Costs 25 BP to use. Learned at Level 3.
Thunder Zauber - This multiple-hit attack will damage one enemy. Costs 25 BP
to use. Learned at Level 4.
Muscle Zauber - This spell can lower several stats of one enemy. Costs 20 BP
to use. Learned at Level 5.
Snail Zauber - Learned when acquiring the Snail Zauber, the attack greatly
decreases the SPEED of an enemy. Costs 10 BP to use.
==============================================================================
CYBERDWARF
==============================================================================
Cyberdwarf was once a normal dwarf from a faraway planet. As he was circling
earth's atmosphere, his ship crashed onto the planet, resulting in a near-
death experience. As a result, Cyberdwarf's skin is now of the same material
used to make b-balls! He is a wise soul who was friends with Lebron James.
--- SPELLS -------------------------------------------------------------------
Insulin Shot - The default ability heals one party member and also cures them
of Diabetes. Costs 5 BP to use.
Dwarven Touch - Cyberdwarf will heal one's VP by half and randomly increases
one of their stats. Costs 10 BP to use.
Dwarf Knowledge - This spell will fully heal a party member's VP and cures
them of all status effects. Costs 15 BP to use.
Glaucoma Prayer - Heals the entire party of Glaucoma. Costs 5 BP to use.
Learned at Level 5.
Dwarf Caress - It will replenish the entire party's VP by 66%. Costs 20 BP to
use. Learned at Level 6.
Chaff Grenade - Inspect Jenkins' corpse on Liberty Island to get his spell.
It will not only deal damage to an enemy, but it also lowers
their GUARD. Costs 10 BP to use.
==============================================================================
HOOPZ BARKLEY
==============================================================================
Hoopz is Charles Barkley's son and an aspiring b-ball player. That's a tough
thing to handle considering how it is banned worldwide, but Hoopz still
practices day in and day out. He is basically your stereotypical loving and
obedient son who has many goals for the future.
--- SPELLS -------------------------------------------------------------------
Gun's Slay - Hoopz's default attack can deal a moderate amount of damage to
one target. Costs 10 BP to use.
Bulletdance - The second default attack has the ability to attack multiple
enemies at once. Costs 10 BP to use.
Status Shot - This default spell will inflict Diabetes on one enemy. Costs 10
BP to use.
TrickGun Assault - A much more powerful attack that can deal loads of damage
on a solo target. Costs 30 BP to use. Learned at Level 6.
______________________________________________________________________________
4] WALKTHROUGH [0400]
______________________________________________________________________________
You will start off with the opening cinema. Charles Barkley reminisces of the
events in 2041. He and Balthios talk about how bleak the future is for Neo New
York while Hoopz practices his b-ball skills. Balthios leaves just as Michael
Jordan enters Barkley's apartment. Jordan and Barkley scuffle, and he leaves.
==============================================================================
4.01] BARKLEY'S APARTMENT [0401]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: Ecto Cooler
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You will take control of Charles Barkley as he sets out to get some medicine.
However, stick inside his apartment for a bit. Walk into the kitchen and
inspect the oven for an Ecto Cooler. Go south to reach the foyer. Descend the
stairs and talk to Gus to learn more about Michael Jordan.
He now goes by the name "Inspector Jordan". After b-ball was banned, Jordan
was the first to join the B-ball Removal Department. So he's basically a
filthy cop now. And he used to be such a good role model. Anyways, exit your
apartment to reach the streets of Neo New York.
==============================================================================
4.02] NEO NEW YORK [0402]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: Ecto Cooler x4, Steroid x3, Tobacco x2
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o Talk to the bum wandering around for
| - SHOP - | pretty hilarious results. Speak to the
o-------------------------------o throbbing gas pump to the right of the
| Volleyball................100 | apartment to save your game. Go west to
| Wrist Brace................70 | the next area and talk to the woman to
| Jersey.....................55 | learn more about The Great B-Ball Purge
| Bapes......................22 | and why Charles Barkley isn't exactly
| Sunglasses.................18 | thrilled to be a part of the city. Enter
| Backwards Cap..............15 | the building next to her (press Z next to
o-------------------------------o the door) to enter Chin's Store. Talk to
Chin to receive the goods: five Ecto
Coolers, three Steroids, and two Tobaccos. Exit the store and move south past
the soldier. Talk to the punk with the red mohawk if you wish to buy any Ecto
Coolers. The dealer below will sell you Chups for some dough.
However, go south through the parking lot and talk to the Pusher-Man. He has a
lot of stuff in store for you, so you may want to pick up the Jersey and the
Volleyball; both will raise your POWER and GUARD a lot. As for the third
equipment, you can go with anything; I went for the Bapes.
Return to the street near Chin's Store and walk to the left. If you wish to
access a hidden area late in the game, then DO NOT give the little kid near
the chuch a Neo-Shekel. Enter the church and speak to the priest, who just
happens to Larry Bird. LMAO. Converse with Father Bird for a bit, then leave.
Now that you're done with your errands, head back home. Barkley will start to
see things from the past. Return to the apartment and save your game again.
Charles passes out on the couch and just happens to miss an important news
broadcast. Another Chaos Dunk was performed, destroying all of Manhattan.
However, Charles Barkley is the only person who can perform such a move. He is
awaken by the sound of Inspector Jordan and his platoon.
Jordan is ready to arrest you on sight, but Barkley has other plans. The
soldiers will attempt to tazer you, but you'll have to quickly press the key
onscreen to avoid the attack. Get hit twice and you die. Avoid the first two
soldiers to escape the room. Input another two buttons to finally flee the
apartment.
Avoid the group of soldiers outside the same way to move on. Dodge the next
set, then continue down the alley. All of the button inputs are the same, so
if you keep dying, all you need to do is memorize them. Barkley will be
cornered in the alley and is ready to surrender, but a mysterious figure will
aid him in his escape.
==============================================================================
4.03] B-BALL CATACOMBS [0403]
==============================================================================
Enemies: Ball Brain, Slam Spectre, Zomballer
Items: B-Ball, Battlers Tome 1, Bapes, Battlers Tome 2, Battlers Tome 3,
BBall Shard, BBall Tear x4, Chicken Dew x2, Ecto Cooler x2, Gatorade
Gum, Jacket, Jersey, Protein Paste x5, Volleyball
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o The mysterious cloaked person turns out
| - VENDING MACHINE - | to be the Ultimate Hellbane and joins
o-------------------------------o your party. I suggest reading the three
| BBall Tear................220 | Battler's Tomes to learn the basics of
| BBall Juice...............125 | battling and all that junk. Save at the
| Steroids..................100 | pump and move east to find your first
| Tobacco...................100 | enemy. Battling is turn-based, but you
| BBall Shard................90 | must do a lot more than sit back and
| Ecto Cooler................66 | watch each attack. When in battle, read
| Protein Paste..............23 | in the menu how to perform each move.
| Insulin....................20 |
| Chup.......................15 | Once the battle ends, continue to the
o-------------------------------o right to reach a fork. Go south and head
through the tunnel all the way to the
Once the battle ends, continue to the right to reach a fork. Go south and
left. Inspect the tombs of Patrick Ewing and Muggsy Bogues as well as THE b-
ball to get a BBall Shard and two BBall Tears. Return to the grating to the
right and walk across. Inspect the globe for yet another Space Jam reference.
Inspect the next two tombs for two more BBall Tears. Move onto the next area.
Ultimate Hellbane suggests that you should watch your steps on the grating.
Make sure to walk (don't run!) across to reach the other side safely. Continue
south down the hall to reach a large pool containing the last memories of more
famous b-ballers. Barkley questions his decision to use the first Chaos Dunk,
but nothing can be changed. Inspect the two wall panels on the north side of
the room for a Jersey and a Volleyball.
Go east to spot a statue of the Ultimate B-Ball. This Healing B-Ball can
well... heal your VP and BP, so do so and continue on. Hellbane stops Barkley
and feels the prescense of a ref. A ref that is trying to escape to the B-Ball
Dimension. However, such a ghastly creature is evil, so get ready to jam!
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: Dread Ref
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 2
This boss is very easy and doesn't have too much health. Technical Foul can
Foul one of your party members, and Knife Boot Face Gash can deal a lot of
damage. Fortunately, many of the hits have a high chance of missing. You can
use your various skills, but they aren't necessarily needed. Most powerful
physical attacks, such as Barkley's Forward Jumper and Hellbane's Zauber Slash
is enough to put him away after enough hits. Remember that you can use Ecto
Coolers to refill your VP.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Continue through the tunnels after defeating the Dread Ref. If you inspect the
wall panel past the boss battle, you will find five Protein Pastes. Open the
nearby tomb, Kobe Bryant will attack. He isn't too tough, so use physical
attacks to put away the legend.
After Barkley cries about destroying his former friend and b-ball star,
proceed north to reach a pump and a vending machine. Open the wall panel next
to the pump for Bapes. You can purchse some items from the vending machine; go
with some Insulin and Chup. Once done window shopping, save at the pump.
Walk to the left and take the first path leading south. Open the wall panel
for two Chicken Dews and return to the tunnel. If you inspect the wall panel
between the two tunnels, you will find a Jacket. Now take the second path to
find a sliding tile puzzle. Sliding tile puzzles suck, but the solution for
the tile puzzle is:
Right, Right, Down, Left, Left, Down, Right, Right, Up, Up, Left, Left
Once the puzzle is complete, you will earn a Gatorade Gum. If for some reason
you mess up, just leave and reenter the area to reset the tiles. Go north back
to the main tunnel and move west. Open the wall panel for three Ecto Coolers
and turn back; there is nothing valuable further on. Return to the vending
machine and stock up on any more goods you need (make sure you have some
Tobacco and Ecto Coolers if you're all out) and save again.
Proceed north to the tomb of Lebron James as the Ultimate Hellbane reveals
himself to be Balthios! Lebron's ghost tells Barkley of B.L.O.O.D.M.O.S.E.S
and they may be using the Ultimate B-Ball (y' know, the one from Space Jam)
for evil intentions. Before fading away, James tells Barkley to find
Cyberdwarf, whoever (or whatever) that is. After the ghost disappears, another
evil monster comes to crash our party.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: BBall Monster
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 3
The BBall Monster is certainly tougher than the Dread Ref from before. His
attacks are very strong, especially against Baltheos. His Ball Punch can deal
around 95 damage to Baltheos! His Juke Spinner attack can hit several times
between both party members, dealiing around 20 damage a pop. BBall Twister is
another strong attack that deals around 50 damage in one hit.
The key to winning is to guard and lower the BBall Monster's POWER. Use
Baltheos's Flame Zauber has the ability to lower its POWER, so use the attack
when you get a chance. The monster can use Brace Onself, which will raise its
POWER, so definitely use Flame Zauber if it uses the ability. Once it is
weakened, unleash your greatest attacks, such as Ice Zauber and Barkley's
Showboat Jam. Maintain your VP and occasionally guard to lower the chance of
getting pummeled by the BBall Monster. Not too tough of a fight when powerful
attacks can deal 100-200 damage.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Once the battle comes to a close, you will obtain Lebron's sacred B-Ball. It
is revealed that Cyberdwarf is an old friend of Lebron's, so it looks like we
will have to search high and low for this guy. The duo leaves the catacombs.
==============================================================================
4.04] NEO NEW YORK SEWERS [0404]
==============================================================================
Enemies: Ball Droid, Ball Spider, Whistle
Items: Chicken Dew, Ice Zauber
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o First off, make sure to equip the B-Ball
| - VENDING MACHINE - | to Barkley to significantly increase his
o-------------------------------o POWER. Walk forward, opening the chest on
| Chicken Fry...............699 | the right for an Ice Zauber. Give it to
| BBall Tear................220 | Baltheos immediately and move north to
| Chicken Dew...............179 | find a vending machine and a pump. Talk
| BBall Juice...............125 | to the odd robot near the pump and it'll
| Steroids..................100 | join your party (at Level 3). This is
| Tobacco...................100 | Vinceborg 2050, an android recreation of
| BBall Shard................90 | Vince Carter. His stats are very good, so
| Ecto Cooler................66 | you shouldn't have to worry about his
| Fstone Mvitamin............25 | equipment or anything.
| Protein Paste..............23 |
| Insulin....................20 | If you need, stock up on Ecto Coolers or
| Chup.......................15 | Tobacco. If you wish, you can grab a few
| Alcohol....................10 | Alcohols or Fstone Mvitamins. Save at the
o-------------------------------o gas pump and move north. You can test out
Vinceborg in battle, and boy, he has some
powerful attacks. His Eye Laser attack is awesome, since you can freely move
between targets when the attack is under way. Defeat the enemies north of the
vending machine and go up the ladder at the end.
Pick up the Chicken Dew up here and climb back down. Return to the fork just
past the vending machine and go east. Climb the next ladder at the end and
continue through the tunnels to eventually reach Cesspool X.
==============================================================================
4.05] CESSPOOL X [0405]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: Poem, Snail Zauber
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o Talk to the vulture (yeah, you read that
| - SHOP - | right) to gain access to Cesspool X. Go
o-------------------------------o forward to get stopped by a snail. He'll
| Spiked B-Ball.............475 | give you a Poem in order to deliver it to
| Dwarf Warhammer...........411 | the kitsune. The gang reads it and finds
| Dwarf Pride...............208 | out that the poem is absolutely dreadful,
| Time Zauber...............201 | so they decide to cut the snail a break
| Referee Uniform...........175 | and revamp the whole thing. Of course,
| Trenchcoat................156 | you don't have to, but you'll be missing
| Thunder Zauber............154 | out on a great item. Save your game
| Sweatband..................89 | at the pump north of the fox (don't talk
| Ace Bandage................75 | to her yet). After saving, talk to the
o-------------------------------o residents of Cesspool X. Some give you
funny responses, like the guy who was
o-------------------------------o surgically altered to look just like
| - SHOP - | Huckleberry Hound and Yogi Bear.
o-------------------------------o
| Chicken Fry...............699 | The inn is next to Yogi Bear, so you can
| BBall Tear................220 | pay up 25 Neo-Shekles if you wish to heal
| Chicken Dew...............179 | up. The weapon shop is near the kitsune,
| BBall Juice...............125 | so go inside and stock up on the goods. I
| Steroids..................100 | suggest buying new equipment for Balthios
| Tobacco...................100 | and Vinceborg. Pick up a Trenchcoat and
| BBall Shard................90 | an Ace Bandage for Baltheos and a Spiked
| Ecto Cooler................66 | B-Ball for Vinceborg. If you have enough
| Fstone Mvitamin............25 | money left, then you can probably stock
| Protein Paste..............23 | up Barkley's bling too. Remember that you
| Insulin....................20 | should sell all old bling to get more
| Chup.......................15 | money back.
| Alcohol....................10 |
o-------------------------------o Alright, now about that poem. Hopefully
you chose to revamp the thing, since you
can get a nice item if you do so. Speak the kitsune, J. Lindsay, to learn
about her interests. After interviewing her, the gang retreats to the inn to
write a halfway-decent poem. Baltheos's suggestions suck, but Vinceborg chimes
in. Robots know nothing about love, so you should probably ditch his ideas. Or
maybe not! Go with Vince's lines:
"enjoys hunting small prey"
"does not mind animal feces much"
"and her friends in Cesspool X"
Deliver the poem to J. Lindsay and she will love it. Score! The couple will
leave and you will receive a Snail Zauber. Hopefully you followed Vince's
advise. If not, then you will still get rewards. If you decide to give J.
Lindsay the poem like it is, you will receive 600 Neo-Shekels. If you decide
to screw it up with Baltheos's sappy lines and make the poem even worse,
you'll only get 400. Still not too shabby.
Alright, now we are ready to find Cyberdwarf. Save once again and enter his
house, which is right next to the pump. Baltheos warns that he isn't the most
attractive of folks, so try not to stare. I mean, his entire body is composed
of b-balls...
Cyberdwarf joins the party after agreeing to help find Hoopz. It's time to
return to Neo New York again, so exit the house. Save your game and proceed
north to the next area. Go to the left at the intersection to reach the city.
NOTE: There is a secret dungeon inside of Cyberdwarf's house. I recommend
that you go through the place, since you can get some new items and
skills. Skip to Section 5.1 if you decide to take a trip there.
If you managed to complete Dikembe Mutumbo's Tomb and got the Femur, then talk
to the dog wandering around (the normal one, not the freaks). It will begin to
talk and trade its Nikes for your Femur. Do so and equip it to a slow
character to boost their SPEED by 14!
==============================================================================
4.06] NEO NEW YORK [0406]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: None
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Enter the church to the left. Michael Jordan is waiting for you with Hoopz.
Father Larry has been brutally killed, and before the same can happen to
Hoopz, he begins to pray to Clispaeth. Vinceborg freaks out and leaves your
party to destroy "the one", who is apparently Hoopz! Time to fight whomever
stands in our way, even if that happens to be Vinceborg!
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: Michael Jordan, Vinceborg 2050
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 5
Michael Jordan is fairly weak, so do everything in your power to take him out
first. His Hurricane Shot can deal multiple shots to various party members and
H-H-Head Shot can cut a nice chunk out of one party member's VP. If you have
Holy Dunk, use it on Jordan to deal around 250 damage. Use Baltheos's Thunder
Zauber and Cyberdwarf's physical attacks to take out Jordan in hopefully one
or two rounds. He isn't much of a threat, but get him out of the way first.
Once Michael Jordan is down for the count, it's just you and Vinceborg. Use
Cyberdwarf to restore Barkley and Baltheos's BP and leave those two to the
attacking. Like you know, Vince's Eye Laser attack can really hurt. Refractor
Beam is equally as bad, but luckily those are his only two offensive attacks.
He does have Recharge, which heals around 240 VP. Like always, lower his POWER
with Flame Zauber and commence with the beatdown. This battle isn't exactly
hard, but take note that Vinceborg has a lot of VP.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Jordan flees and is followed by Vinceborg 2050: B.L.O.O.D.M.O.S.E.S agent of
death. Yeah, no more Vince Carter. In his dying words, Larry Bird apologizes
to Charles. :( Anyways, the group retreats to Cyberdwarf's house.
==============================================================================
4.07] NEO NEW YORK SEWERS [0407]
==============================================================================
Enemies: Ball Droid, Ball Spider, Whistle
Items: Chicken Dew, Facemask, Turkey Feather
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o The party talks and more info is learned,
| - SHOP - | like how B.L.O.O.D.M.O.S.E.S killed
o-------------------------------o Lebron James in order to harness the
| Spiked B-Ball.............475 | power of the zaubers. The new mission is
| Dwarf Warhammer...........411 | to create a new Ultimate B-Ball to
| Time Zauber...............201 | counter the evil corporations, so we are
| Steroids..................100 | headed off to the Spalding Factory to
| BBall Shard................90 | find some answers.
| Ecto Cooler................66 |
o-------------------------------o Well, Hoopz has joined the party, so it's
best that we rest here in Cesspool X for
o-------------------------------o now. Heal at the inn and stock up on some
| - VENDING MACINE - | bling for the kid. Give him a Referee
o-------------------------------o Uniform and an Ace Bandage. Save your
| Chicken Fry...............699 | game and when you try to leave to the
| BBall Tear................220 | north, one of the townsfolks will give
| Chicken Dew...............179 | you a Turkey Feather. Yay, a useless
| BBall Juice...............125 | item! Stupid animal people. Exit and go
| Steroids..................100 | to the right to reach the next area.
| Tobacco...................100 |
| BBall Shard................90 | Walk east until you reach a small path
| Ecto Cooler................66 | leading north. Follow it and open the
| Fstone Mvitamin............25 | chest at the end for a Facemask. This
| Protein Paste..............23 | equipment greatly boosts GUARD, so I gave
| Insulin....................20 | it to Hoopz. Walk around the perimeter of
| Chup.......................15 | the area. There is a ladder at the botoom
| Alcohol....................10 | right corner, but pass it and continue
o-------------------------------o down the path. You can find another
ladder at the bottom left corner. Go up
the ladder to find a Chicken Dew and a letter from Dr. Allard. Hmm...
If you want, you can return to the southeast ladder to find an area with a
shop. He has some equipment and items, so you should check it out.
The secret agent dude at the center of the area demands that you fork over
5000 Neo-Shekels to proceed, but that is a little out of hand. Return to the
surface and go west. Enter the doorway and descend the stairs. The punk on the
left is a big fat meanie, and the guy on the right spews random lies (there is
no key and you cannot get into the locked door. So just ignore his ass).
Proceed up the stairs to reach a vending machine and a pump.
There is a man next to the vending machine that asks you to spare him 10 Neo-
Shekels. If you are willing to be a big enough jerk to reach Deathtemple, then
do not give the man any dough.
Save at the pump and pick up any items from the vending machine. Enter the
building to find yourself in what appears to be a waiting room. Talk to the
two suits at the front of the room for a scolding. The party suggests what we
should do. There are three options:
OPTION 1: Pay the toll. Peh, like we're gonna do that. There are two much
easier ways to solve our problem here. >_>
OPTION 2: Bust into his office. You can either attack the toll-keeper guard
or the two suits in front of Dr. Allard's office. It's your choice,
but they can be pretty tough foes.
OPTION 3: Find Rufus. The recommended path. Enter Dr. Allard's office and
talk to the suit on the left. Ask if he is Rufus, and the suit will
tell you that he is doing guard duty in one of the tunnels. Leave
the office and go down the ladder past the save pump. Rufus is down
here with the guy blabbing about the locked door. He is glad that
the party is standing up to the doc and tells you his password:
"when we get the final hardware, the performance is just going to
skyrocket." Cool! Return to the office and tell the two suits the
password. Once the party enters, you will have to fight a guard.
He is cake. However, the doctor will attack afterwards.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: Dr Allard
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 6
The doctor has very high GUARD, so dealing loads of damage to him can be hard.
His attacks are very deadly, such as Heart Stab (it can deal around 200-250
damage to one character). Dirty Needles is fairly weak, but can target many
characters at once. Faulty Plague Vaccine is probably Dr. Allard's most lethal
attack. He can hit one party member three times, each dealing around 100
damage. That's not all; with every hit, he will inflict a status effect.
Assign one character to heal non-stop. I don't know why, but my Balthios blew
in this fight, so I assigned him with the healing role. Have Hoopz use
Accurate Shot, because his skills are very weak. Cyberdwarf should use any of
his physical attacks (I'm a fan of Jab) and Barkley can use Forward Jumper. I
suggest spending the first turn or two lowering the doc's POWER and SPEED with
Fire and Snail Zauber, respectively, then let Baltheos heal for the rest of
the fight. It's not very hard, but it may take a little while.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
The gang will arrive near the gate to Proto Neo New York after the boss
battle. Head to the gate and walk through where the suit used to be. When you
are ready to enter Proto Neo New York, go down the ladder. As you climb down
several ladders, the final one will break. Like in the beginning of the game,
input the key shown onscreen (it's just Up three times) to survive the fall.
Go through the gate to the city.
==============================================================================
4.08] PROTO NEO NEW YORK [0408]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: None
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o Hmm, this place looks like a dump. The
| - SHOP - | party decided to take a long-needed break
o-------------------------------o from all the action. It's bonkers!
| ZX ModelX571X.............343 | Cyberdwarf tells Hoopz about Clispaeth
| Battlestech Gun...........287 | and the Cyberpocalypse, so listen up to
| Chicken Dew...............179 | learn some of the backstory. The dwarf is
| Mithril'braster...........176 | interrupted by some sort of laughter, and
| Ultimate Wristband........165 | a mystery person tells everyone to find
| BBall Shard................90 | shelter immediately. Proto Neo New York
| ZX ZaubertechZ.............78 | seems to be haunted by Ghost Dad. The
| Ecto Cooler................66 | mystery person turns out to be Juwanna
| ZX Zaubertech1.............32 | Mann! The only way to reach the Spalding
o-------------------------------o Building is to defeat the Ghost Dad.
First, enter the house to the right of
where you just were. If you wish to go on a one-way track to Deathtemple, then
refuse to apologize to Wildman. Ooh, I'm so evil. *insert evil laugh*
Exit and move west. Save at the pump and enter the house on the right to find
the inn. If you want to stay and rest, then pay up 30 Neo-Shekels. Go inside
the large building to the left of the pump to find a shop and a gambling hobo.
Ignore the gambler, since he doesn't even have any money to offer if you win.
Talk to the guy near the hobo and he will ask for you to retrieve the
F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N. from the Spalding Building. You will get a nice reward if
you fill your end of the deal.
There is a gun salesman in this house, so check out what he has to offer. Pick
up a ZX ModelX571X for Hoopz and a few Ultimate Wristbands for the rest of the
party. It's pricey, but you should have enough money if you sell your old
equipment. Leave and go over to the bulletin board to the left of the pump.
Take the Ghost Dad hunter mission, save your game, and go talk to Juwanna Mann
again. She will take you to the ghost.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: Ghost Dad
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 6
Oh God, the character sprite for Ghost Dad is LOL-worthy. However, he is the
toughest boss you have faced yet. His Fog Breath can lower the entire party's
SPEED in one shot. Spook can deal around 100 damage and inflicts Glaucoma on
the target. Ghostly Curse is even worse, since it inflicts random status
effects on the entire party. Use Dwarf Caress if this attack ever comes up.
Ectoplasm is a straight-up powerful attack, which can deal around 300 damage
to one character. Watch out for Ghost Muscle, which will raise Ghost Dad's
POWER significantly. Use Fire Zauber on Baltheos's next turn and whip out the
Ecto Coolers for this fight.
Even with Hoopz's new weapon, he should stick to the group healer because he
is still very weak. If the entire party is perfectly fine, then have him use
TrickGun Assault. It is a surprisingly powerful attack. Have Cyberdwarf attack
occasionally, but have him use Dwarf Caress and Glaucoma Prayer if the other
party members are hit with status effects. Baltheos should use Fire Zauber and
Muscle Zauber at the start of the battle, then resort to Zauber Slash.
Barkley has a wide range of powerful attacks. Holy Dunk can deal over 300
damage in one shot, but it drains your entire BP bar. So instead of using Holy
Dunk and then refilling all his BP, it may be better to use a handful of
weaker attacks such as Vampslam and Doubleteam. Remember to stock up on some
Ecto Coolers and BBall Shards if you happen to lose the battle. It'll take a
very long time (much longer than the other bosses) and you may die once or
twice, but hang in there and you should eventually win.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Ghost Dad will explode and the fog will lift. After a conversation with
Juwanna Mann, stay at the inn. During your stay, Ghost Dad will contact
Barkley and thank him. Defeating the ghost has freed him from the chains that
bound him in Proto Neo New York, and he can finally rest in peace. Barkley
will learn the Ghost Muscle technique.
Save at the pump and go west to reach the Spalding Watergrounds. Follow the
road and talk to the suit outside of the building. Like the guy in the gun
stor, he will ask you to retrive the F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N. for him. If you do so,
you'll receive 2500 Neo-Shekels. All the better reason to find the weapon!
==============================================================================
4.09] SPALDING FACTORY [0409]
==============================================================================
Enemies: Mech Gatorade, Mutant Baller, Slam Phantom
Items: BBall Juice, Blue Keycard, Dwarfbane, F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N., Green Key,
Prototype B-Ball, Red Keycard, Time Zauber
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o Barkley will notice a red and blue screen
| - VENDING MACINE - | at the entrance. Smartypants Hoopz says
o-------------------------------o that they will need keycards to use these
| Chicken Fry...............699 | computers, which will activate lifts in
| BBall Tear................220 | the factory. We don't have any keycards
| Chicken Dew...............179 | yet, so save at the pump and go shopping
| BBall Juice...............125 | at the vending machine.
| Steroids..................100 |
| Tobacco...................100 | Walk down the hallway and take a left at
| BBall Shard................90 | the intersection, then go in the doorway.
| Ecto Cooler................66 | Barkley suggests that we check every
| Fstone Mvitamin............25 | computer for the keys, but that isn't
| Protein Paste..............23 | needed. Telling you where to find stuff
| Insulin....................20 | is my job! From the start of the room, go
| Chup.......................15 | into the second cubicle on the right and
| Alcohol....................10 | inspect the trashcan for a Dwarfbane.
o-------------------------------o Give it to Dwarfbane and enter the third
cubicle. Again, scroung through the trash
to find some BBall Juice. Talk to the janitor in the hall for a really weird
conversation, then head to the north end of the hall to find a Red Keycard in
the corner. Before the group can leave, we'll catch a glimpse of a strange of
a strange flashback concerning Hoopz. Hm.
Now we can return to the entrance of the factory. Use the Red Keycard on the
computer screen on the left to activate the lift. Go back to the intersection
and go through the red door. Enter the first cubicle and rummage through the
trashcan for a Time Zauber. Talk to Leonard the janitor again and then enter
the next room on the right. Barkley will feel odd in this room and another
flashback will occur. Quickly pass through and to the next cubicle-filled
hallway. Inspect the first cubicle's trash to find the F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N.!
Okay, now we can bring it back to one of the two civilians. You can either
give it to the punk in Proto Neo New York for a Gun's Sticker or you can give
it to the suit. Try and negotiate some more money out of him and he will fight
you. If you manage to win, you will get the money AND the gun. Obviously this
is the way to go. Give the gun to Hoopz after the fight.
Return to where you found the F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N. and proceed down the hall.
Pick up the Blue Keycard and like before, you'll be treated to another
flashback. Well, now we know what happened to Leonard and Bill Cosby. Return
to the entrance of the factory and use the Blue Keycard. Once the lift is
working again, enter the northern door at the fork.
Talk to Leonard to break the news to him that he's... kinda dead. As a result,
the janitor thanks you by giving the party a Green Key. Use it on the green
door in the room. A mystery man will quiz Barkley on b-balls, and after some
crazy metaphor mumbo-jumbo, he will reveal himself as Scott H. Creelman, the
CEO of Spalding. Battle time!
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
BOSS: Scott Creelman
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Recommended Level: 7
The only attack you should watch out for is Kamikaze Jam, since it can
basically kill someone in one hit (not literally, but it deals around 540
damage). Make sure to use Chicken Dews and Steroids when needed. Otherwise,
his techniques aren't that dangerous. Low Blow is very weak and Illusion Shot
can deal around 65 damage to multiple targets. You should be able to deal a
load of damage with skills such as Vampslam, Thunder Zauber, and TrickGun
Assault.
After losing a lot of health, Scott Creelman will restort to dirty tactics.
Glory of BBall will restore around 550-570 HP and cure the CEO of all status
ailments. He'll also start to use BBall Bash, which can deal around 80 damage
to one target THREE times. Remember, Steroids and Chicken Dew. Have Cyberdwarf
use Dwarf Caress and make sure to deal as much damage as possible with the
rest of the party to take him out before he can heal.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Scott Creelman will give Barkley the Prototype B-Ball before dying. But we
have to recharge it according to the CEO. All of a sudden, Inspector Jordan
will attack Hoopz with Type 2 Diabetes, which is uncurable. The gang returns
to Juwanna Mann's house with Hoopz. She says the only way to possibly save
Hoopz is to contact an old hermit south of Proto Neo New York.
==============================================================================
4.10] PROTO NEO NEW YORK [0410]
==============================================================================
Enemies: None
Items: Ultimate Wristband
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
o-------------------------------o Head to the save pump and save your game,
| - SHOP - | then go south to the Sunbaked Parking
o-------------------------------o Lot. Go down the road to find the parking
| Dwarfstear................788 | lot, where the party will decide where to
| Mystic B-Ball.............700 | go next. Cyberdwarf suggests to head
| Tek-Skeleton..............507 | through the Underground Railroad.
| Battlestech Gun...........287 |
| Referee Uniform...........175 | Talk to the man nearby and pick up some
| Goggles...................168 | new bling and equipment. Grab a Mystic
| Athletic Supporter........160 | B-Ball, Dwarfstear, and a Tek-Skeleton.
| Steroids..................100 | If you wish, you can buy an Athletic
| BBall Shard................90 | Supporter as well. Of course, pick up
| Ecto Cooler................66 | some Steroids and Ecto Coolers if you are
o-------------------------------o almost out.
There is an Ultimate Wristband in the southwest end of the parking lot, so
pick it up as well. There are two ways to reach Liberty Island: through the
Underground Railroad or through the ferry. I will describe both paths in the
next two sections.
==============================================================================
4.11] UNDERGROUND RAILROAD [0411]
==============================================================================