Where ideal is subjective

Monthly Archives: October 2010

Well, I have never really looked forward to go to weddings. I always find it to be a noisy, overcrowded, loud for every other sensory organ and most people who are there for the food rather than to ‘bless’ the happy couple. Except, when it is a wedding in the family. That I liked.

Yes, I said ‘liked’. Every wedding in the family was all of the above as well. But considering it being a South Indian family, the food was the type I could not go wrong with, noise was in a language I mostly understood and there was considerably less ‘bling’ to spare my eyes the torture. Also, it was a genuinely happy occasion to meet most of my relatives who would come from far off lands (well, mostly all of them come from Hyderabad, but its still not close by). It was good to catch up, see who has grown out of pre-school to school and so on and so forth. It was funny when people used to explain at the magical effect of time and age on me and exclaim at how I have become older in spite of the fact that everything around them has refused to change. All of this was good. It WAS. Not anymore.

It is not that I dislike all of the above now. It is not that the food has become boring or that the people have become inhospitable. What has happened however, is that the miracle of aging has gone on for too long now. Apparently it is time for me to be sitting at one place and stare into the fire while others try to wonder what time lunch will be served. It is about time that I get hitched. And I can’t say I am surprised. I am surprised however that it has taken them so long to start the discussions. Considering that all of my cousins close to my age (none older than me though) are already married. And also the little matter of being 28.

Today I had to attend another of my cousin’s wedding. The irony is you can’t really miss these weddings. Once I am there however, I try to steer yourself away from all the women after saying a customary hello. I know that if I stick around a minute more than it actually takes to say the usual pleasantries, and WHAM! They will hit me with the question. With a sheepish smile on the face, which is out of genuine concern but still bordering on looking like a triumphant glee at being able to corner me, they ask ‘So when is your turn aye?’ I am amazed at how many people can ask this same question but still get the same reaction out of me every single time. It seems to be a question for which there can be no adequate amount of preparation. There cannot be an answer to it. It is for sure a rhetorical question one would think. Yet, every questioner does not merely ask the question and move on to some other topic of equal irrelevance as one should do once questions of rhetorical nature are put forth, they pause and just look at my face. Either out of sheer sadistic joy of looking at the myriad of expressions mirroring my unique state of mind or out of genuine expectations to get an equally genuine answer. How can I answer? WHAT can I answer? Am I supposed to give a date? Every other answer apart from a date would just draw a look of disappointment making me look like a blasphemous soul.

As of now, I am not sure what sort of feelings I should have for the following fact. The next wedding in the family would most probably be mine considering the next eligible bachelor/bachelorette is at least four years younger to me. This pleasantly assures me that I do not have to prepare answers to the above mentioned question. But it brings about another feeling. It is the same feeling that Neo had when he finally realised he was ‘The One’. It meant that everyone would stop asking him if he really was ‘The One’, but it also meant that he would eventually and inevitable die trying to save the world. (I am only talking about the feeling he has on realisation, not the dieing part, no, that would not be prudent.)

Anyhow, I finally cast aside my miseries and bless and wish the newly married couple (Jyothy and Murali), a very happy and successful life ahead 🙂