That’s more than TMI (too much information). This means that you are not only so narcissistic that you think we care about your weight, you’re too freaking lazy to even send that message out yourself.

And that brings me to this morning’s plea: Please stop making me hate Twitter.

I used to love Twitter.

Back in March 2007, which is a few months after it was rolled out, things were much better. I know this sounds old and curmudgeonly, but it was much better back in the day.

Twitter was chaos. I loved reading the global time line of tweets. It was the ultimate infoporn. I could

peek into the lives of thousands of people around the world and see

what they were doing.

There were no attempts to organize it. It was fun. A dude in Denver would tweet about traffic. My sister-in-law tweeted about dummies she met in everyday life. Others tweeted about their drinking. There were lots of those.

No one had a machine to tweet their weight. If they wanted to tell the world how much they weigh, they had to do it themselves.

Soon, I won’t know if your message about getting drunk on Bass Ale is from you or if you’ve got a Twitter-enabled coozy. If you’re eating breakfast, is that you sending the info out, or do you have Facebook on your toaster?

Please don’t send me personal tweets about your bathroom trips. But if you’re going to do it, at least have the decency to do it yourself.

(Later today: I’m in Uvalde for Veterans Day)

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