I'm giddy as a schoolgirl in south Philly ready to shoot up her playground with a Beretta M12!

No really, I just have to toot my own horn for a second here and point out that I'm in one of the photos on the Coachella site first screen. (As of noon PST on 3/3, anyway.)

I probably shouldn't even be doing this, as I'm not exactly a supermodel, but as the chicas say, I'm "functional". (You can't really make out my face, anyway. However, I just noticed in the photo that I bear a vague resemblance to The Wrestler-era Mickey Rourke. Trust me, though, it's not that bad.)

http://www.severetraumasounds.com/dth/coachella_me_2009030300.jpg

Just to give context, this was of course last year and I spent nearly the entire time in the Sahara. I barely tolerated everyone up until Diplo (awesome) and then The Aphex Twin, who took out my brain, fucked it in the arse, and then smeared it all over the inside of the tent.

Oh and yeah it's not Photoshopped, as I really did wear all that black and the teeth around my neck. (This meant I succeeded admirably in nearly suffocating, then alternately baffling and scaring the piss out of fellow festival-goers. Especially, as one can imagine, the smaller, female ones.)