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2/29/12

Thank you everyone so much for all of your prayers over Justin's surgery-as many of you may know he surgery went beautifully and without complication, Praise the Lord!! I stood up in front of our women's bible study last Thursday, microphone shaking in my hand and shared my gratitude with them, and of course now I'd be so blessed if I could share it with you...

Over the years Justin has always had a difficult time asking me for help (with anything, really) and I over the same years have found that I excel at being selfish! The last 6 months has caused me to put my needs last while handling treatment plans, keeping schedule of appointments, creating special organizational systems for the unusual amount of paperwork coming in from seeing so many doctors, picking up an extra load around the house and helping my husband with once effortless tasks all while holding my full-time job to meet our needs while Justin finishes his masters degree (3 months and counting!!!) Not only has our circumstances required flexibility on my part but also his. This whole dose of craziness has caused Justin to have to ask me for help with all those things and more with the debilitating state of his back leaving him unable to do so many once simple tasks-This was a tremendous growth on his part and I couldn't be more proud of him... Make no mistake, I CANT WAIT 'till it's all over, but it truly has been an experience that i genuinely believe has transformed the face of our marriage and one we'd never trade (except maybe the medical bills).

When you say your wedding vows you promise to take care of each other in sickness and in health-you always hope you'll be like the heroine in he movie who rises to the occasion and displays life-changing amounts of loyalty and commitment (all while retaining a stunning outward appearance and emotional stability) but you never know how you will handle it. All of this followed a particularly gloomy season of life for me-a season that I came out of insecure of my competency to be a wife worthy of my wonderful husband, unsure of my abilities to benefit anyone in any sincere way, and unsure of my own strength to pull myself together at a moments notice. And even though this was hardly movie-worthy--neither my own individual circumstances nor the (all things considered) trivial condition of my husband- it was strangely wonderful to know that by God's sweet grace alone I am capable of putting everything else aside-including my own drowning doubts-to fulfill those promises I made Justin a couple of years ago...