'My Mother's Wishes Were To See Me Walk Across That Graduation Stage In College'

June 08, 2008|By CATHY GRIMES, cgrimes@dailypress.com 247-4758

Toya Carter loves the adrenaline rush of basketball and tennis, but for different reasons. In basketball, she's working with a team and pitted against several opponents. In tennis, it's Toya, the racket, the ball and another player. "It's a chance to prove myself as an athlete," said the tall Hampton High School junior with the serious eyes.

But basketball will be what gets her to college, she said firmly.

Sports were her refuge as Toya, 17, made her way through a staggering string of losses and eviction.

Her mother's health began to fail two years ago, and she suffered a series of strokes, kidney failure, bronchitis and other illnesses, spending weeks in hospitals. With the mother unable to work and no medical insurance, the family's bills mounted. The family had some disability and supplemental income, but there was almost no other financial support.

"I had to grow up fast. My mom was a single parent, and my older sister is special-education," she said.

For several weeks during one of her mother's hospitalizations, the girls struggled to take care of the apartment and pay bills, but they fell too far behind and were evicted. Eventually, they moved in with their grandmother, with whom Toya still lives."We were constantly moving," Toya said. "Basically, we were living out of boxes with a roof over our heads."

Through it all, she never considered herself homeless, even though she met the legal definition because she had no permanent address. "I had a roof over my head," she explained.

As her mother's health declined, Toya lost her aunt, a great-aunt, her great-grandmother and her grandfather. Her mother's health problems worsened, and she began having seizures - including one during a varsity basketball game against Heritage High School.

This past winter, her mother - who had worked as a police dispatcher and earned a bachelor's degree in criminal justice - died of heart failure.

"I missed a lot of school. It was a lot to deal with," Toya said in a small, steady voice. "The only thing I can really do is get up in the morning and put a smile on my face. ... I do what I have to do because if I don't, nobody's going to do it for me. I know I've got to finish school."

That was one of her mother's strongest desires. She insisted that Toya sign a contract to maintain good grades to play sports.

"If I got a C, I had to have a note from the teacher, saying I was working on it," she said.

She has one more year before heading to college. There's no question that she'll go.

"My mother's wishes were to see me walk across that graduation stage in college, and she will see it," Toya said.