(Closed) Sisterwives- 'love should be multiplied, not divided' argh.

Ok so yes I am watching “Sisterwives”. at the beginning credits, the polygamist husband says “love should be multiplied, not divided”.

this just brothers the logical part of my brain, sure it is multiplied x 4 because he has that coming at him from his four wives. But its divided by 4 between the four wives. Ugh, it just bugs the mathy part of my brain, lol.

and yes, I know that love is not a limited resource, blah, blah, blah, but time is finite and the dudes gotta split up his time among four wives!

@squishee: maybe it is multiplied because they all have love for each other, too? Maybe it’s like parents and kids- having a second doesn’t mean your love for the first is diminished??? SOMEONE PLEASE CLARIFY. 🙂

@squishee: Yeah, in an odd way, I almost get polyamorous relationships more than polygamous ones. If six people decide to be in a 6-person marriage the love is “multiplied” (although is the marriage pointless?) but if a man marries four women, he has four different marriages. It’s so sexist. I couldn’t imagine waiting in bed knowing my husband was sleeping with another wife. Especially since you know he’ll favor one over others, or value one for being “sexy” or another for being a better mom. Too many men want to be little kings.

@Syzygy88: But I think that’s the idea/myth that they’re trying to break…that it’s *not* 4 separate marriages. Yes….it’s 4 women married to one man, but there are bonds beyond the marriage bonds that form the structure of the family. In that sense, the women are “married” to each other, although their relationship doesn’t involve a sexual element. (but sex isn’t necessary to a marriage anyways so….)

I’m not polygamous nor polyamorous (don’t think it’s our cup of tea), but I can see some of the benefits of these types of relationships.

@cdncinnamongirl: Yeah, but I assume those benefits are related to the “a woman’s work is never done” idea, i.e. housework and raising kids. I also think showing a family that is fighting the law to have this particular form of marriage is not going to represent what most polygamous relationships are like. Most polygamous relationships happen in very patriarchal countries where it’s the norm. And relationships can be UGLY between wives. Men will take a new wife if the older one is “unsatisfactory;” unfavored wives can starve. I’m sure there are friendships too, and it can work, but I think this type of relationship is suited to a society based on manual labor, not one with a service economy.

I think these types of relationships could only be truly beneficial in an egalitarian society where there are tons of different forms of marriages because of free choice.

That man creeps me out. The way he talks about it, it just sounds like he wants children children and more children. There was a clip I saw of him talking to his first wife, who has only given him one daughter, and she was feeling awful about herself and her self esteem had taken a hit and all he talked about was IVF IVF IVF and other methods.