I am a wife to an engineer who wishes he was a carpenter and a mother to three children. I love things like little girls in pink dresses with lots of tulle, Jesus because He loved me first, little boys in baseball caps, scripture verses that I am pretty sure were written just for me, a cup of coffee with hazelnut creamer, my satisfied soul during worship at our church, watching my husband draw out something really cool that he will soon build for me, a newly renovated room, candles, buying discounted furniture for rooms that only exist in my head, my cell phone, Aaron Shust music, Jimmy Buffett music (without the occasional bad word), and the movie You've Got Mail.

Friday, August 27, 2010

And just like that, both my girls are in grade school. They didn't ask my permission to grow up so fast, they both just came walking down the stairs yesterday morning for school as if it was nothing. Caroline had a smirk on her face that told me she was both proud and a tiny bit anxious, but mainly just ready. And despite the lump in my throat, I was indeed excited for her.

Experiencing milestone moments as a parent is an interesting thing. It stirs emotions deep in your soul that are difficult to put into words. It's a feeling of wanting to cry, laugh, scream, throw-up, and worship, all wrapped up into one big package of "what the heck is going on" kind of feeling. Something too difficult to verbalize, but something every parent understands. These parental milestones just seem different and more raw than other life milestones. The role of a parent is just naturally different from other roles, it's a privilege set apart from other hats that we wear in our lives. It's unique, and the moments we experience that stem from this role seem to stir deeper emotions...and this makes me think of our heavenly Father who is a parent too. I think about His perfect love for His children, and I think about how He must feel on a daily basis watching milestones of His children happen all over the world. And since my feelings and emotions and love are but a reflection of His, how much deeper must His feelings stir, and how much faster must His perfect heart flutter while watching His children grow.

Though these emotions run deep for us as parents, they are simpler for our children. They do not yet understand the gravity of things like starting Kindergarten. To us as parents, it is one huge leap in the direction of growing up, but to them it is just starting Kindergarten...as it should be of course. While getting ready to leave Caroline that first day of school, I spent one more moment double checking everything in her bag to ensure she had what she needed. I asked if she had her lunch, and she responded by saying "yes, and even though it looks disgusting, I promise I will eat it".

And so just like that my baby girl grew up, left home for her first day of school, and bravely walked into that lunch room with a disgusting sandwich for lunch. What a milestone, what a moment to remember.

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comments:

Now I am all choked up! Wow. What a wonderful post! I am already sad at the fact that Jemma is turning 5 and to me that is a "big girl"! What a wonderful first day for the girls even with a disgusting sandwich! Love that picture of their feet with those sweet uniforms. I hope they have a wonderful first week at school!

I find myself silently and sometimes out loud screaming, "STOP GROWING!" :) With my oldest entering her last year in elementary school and my youngest losing a tooth and needing deodorant all on the same day... I, too, am wrestling with that mix of "wanting to cry, laugh, scream, throw-up, and worship!"

These milestones seem to creep up and smack us full on. I see my boys turning into young men and I've been wondering am I enough, patient enough, sharing enough, ministering to their hearts enough, ...and all those other enoughs. I guess there's only one enough and that's Jesus. But seeing them growing up before my eyes, I hope that continue to find His enoughs.

My only "baby" is starting Kinder. on Monday. Wanting to do a cartwheel and cry at the same time is rough....but I suppose if I tried it, I would end up on my knees which is where I belonged in the first place :)

Hi AmySorry I have not been blogging for a couple of weeks now but thank you so much for leaving such a kind comment, it is so nice to meet you.It is moving day for me and tomorrow I will no longer have a shop, I have mixed emotions but mostly I am excited to see what the Lord has for me. Your girls are adorable, and I wish them the best in school, I am sure they will do greatBlessingsRebecca