Christine Bicknell wept as she told how she blames herself for putting the youngster at the mercy of the sex beast who was her “soulmate”

With her precious granddaughter Tia Sharp still missing, distraught Christine Bicknell turned to the man she loved for support.

But Stuart Hazell’s sympathy and concern masked a ­devastating secret – he had murdered the 12-year-old and hidden her body in the attic of the same home where they clung to each other for comfort in those dark days.

And last night, 47-year-old Christine wept as she told how she blames herself for putting the youngster at the mercy of the sex beast who was her “soulmate” - a vile individual who she now wants to suffer for the rest of his days.

Christine said her world fell apart when she realised he had snuffed out the girl’s life and left her to rot.

She sobbed: “I loved Tia with all my heart, but I let my baby down and I will never be able to get over that.

“I spent five nights in that house being cuddled and comforted by the man I loved, praying for Tia to come home safely.

"Her mum, Natalie, even came round and stayed with us because we were holding each other together.

“But all the time Tia’s body was above our heads, all alone wrapped in bin bags... and Stuart had killed her.

“But I didn’t know, why the hell didn’t I know she was there? I’m her ­grandmother, I should have protected her but I failed her.

“All her life I’d told her she could rely on me, that I’d look after her.

"I’d warned her about all the evil people out there, the paedophiles and sickos, and had the stranger danger chats.

“But all the time the danger was in my own home, and I had absolutely no idea. People ask why I hadn’t picked up any clues.

"Surely I must have suspected something... he was my partner, we shared a bed, we shared everything for five and a half years.

“But I swear, there were no clues that I was living with a monster.

"And if people want to make comparisons they should look at Stuart... another Ian Huntley. I feel nothing but pure hatred for Stuart Hazell.”

IAN VOGLER / DAILY MIRROR

Distraught: Christine Bicknell tells her story about life with Hazell

The killer put Tia’s family through a four-day court ordeal where they had to listen to harrowing evidence about her brutal murder as he spun lie after lie about his involvement.

He claimed she fell down the stairs of their home in New Addington, South London, last August and he hid her body because he panicked.

The killer’s barrister Lord Carlile QC said the plea was changed on the fifth day of the Old Bailey trial because his client wanted to make it known that “Tia’s family have suffered enough and he did not want to put them through any further stages of this trial or this process”.

But angry Christine said: “He changed his plea to guilty saying he was doing it to spare the family from any more suffering.

“That’s sick and pathetic, he’s the cause of all our suffering and we had to sit through four days of the most agonising evidence in that courtroom.

“Now I just want him to suffer, to go through the hell he has sentenced us too.

"Every day for the rest of his miserable life I want him to suffer mentally, ­physically, emotionally, to feel real pain. I won’t ever have a chance of peace until he’s dead and even then it might be too late for me. There can never be closure for us.”

As Hazell pleaded guilty, there were gasps from the public gallery and Tia’s father, Steven, broke down in tears.

Hazell will be sentenced today.

Tia was last seen alive on August 2 but her body was only found on August 10.

Hazell had wrapped her body in a sheet and bin bags, then sealed them with tape before she was placed in the loft alongside her clothes.

Metropolitan Police

Evil: Stuart Hazell will be sentenced for Tia's murder today

Christine spent months under ­suspicion of killing Tia.

Many people will remember her from the horrific days after Tia’s kidnap as she joined locals in searching for the missing youngster.

With her dark-rimmed glasses, short cropped hair and T-shirt bearing her granddaughter’s face, she cut a tragic but composed figure... adding to the unfounded speculation that she may have been involved in the disappearance.

But as we spoke yesterday she looked like a woman whose life had been torn apart by the ultimate betrayal and loss.

Wringing her hands and stroking the rose tattoo on the middle finger of her left hand, Christine shook physically as she recalled the most sickening details of their family’s nightmare.

And as she told of the moment when she learned that Tia’s decomposing body had been found in her loft, she covered her face with her hands and wept bitterly.

Then, defiantly, she pulled herself together and said: “I want the chance to tell people what really happened.

“If there’s one thing I could say to Tia now, it’s, ‘I’m so, so sorry’.”

The details of Tia’s murder were horrific and shocking. The prosecution case included a graphic photograph of a young girl claimed to be Tia that was posed and taken after she died.

Hazell had also searched the internet for child pornography using terms including “violent forced rape” and “little girls in glasses”.

Tia’s blood was found on a sex toy that was in the house, and on Hazell’s bed. His semen was found on bed clothes in her room.