HOW TO BE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN

Being a strong, independent woman
doesn't necessarily require that you be a die-hard feminist. Rather, it means
learning to express who you are at your core, whether you are shy and
soft-spoken or loud and assertive, without trying to fit a certain mold implied
by your being a female. Read this article to learn how to undo this type of
societal preconditioning and be the woman you are, whoever that may be.

1. Don't compare
yourself to other women. While there is nothing
wrong with having a female role model to look up to, constantly feeling jealous
of other women will leave you feeling horrible about yourself. Though jealousy
is natural to some degree, western society tends to exacerbate female jealousy
through advertisements and films that feature unrealistic standards of beauty.
The result is a culture of women who feel insecure and unhappy with their own
bodies.

·The first step to overcoming jealousy is to recognize when you
are experiencing it. If you find yourself reading a magazine and comparing your
own body to those of the models, take a moment to remind yourself that a) these
women arepaid to look the way they do, and many of them lead very
unhealthy lives to maintain their figures, and b) the camera really does add
weight; women who look "perfect" in magazines or in movies usually
look gaunt in real life.

·Try not to compare your own negative qualities with other
women's positive qualities. Every woman has her own best assets, whether it is
her breasts, her legs, her arms, her eyes, her hair, or her butt. Let go of
trying to have it all, and appreciate what you do have.

2.Don't base your happiness on being in a relationship. Having a man (or woman) to love should enhance your life,
not define it. No matter how bad you may think you need a relationship, you
must first learn to love yourself before you can even begin to love somebody
else.

·Remember that nothing lasts forever. Even the perfect
relationship might end one day, so you need to be sure that you have a strong
enough cushion to land on after a breakup or divorce.

·If you are already in a relationship, be sure you have other
things going on in your life outside of the relationship, whether it is school,
work, friends, a fitness routine, or your family.

3.Don't feel obligated to follow fashion trends. Being an independent woman means dressing the way you
want, regardless of what people around you are telling you to wear. Use fashion
as a way to express your mood, your taste, and your creativity.

·Remember that there's a reason why designers use 90-pound models
on their runways: not everything that is en vogue is figure-flattering. When
deciding what to wear, you should take into account your body type as well as
your personal taste.

·There's nothing wrong with being fashion-forward, but don't
force yourself to keep up with trends that you don't like or that don't look
good on you. If you enjoy keeping up with the trends, then learn how to make
them work for you by putting your own personal spin on them.

4.Protect your sexuality. Every woman, at one point
or another, encounters a man who wants to take advantage of her sexually. It is
important to learn both how and when to say no to a man who is making unwelcome
advances on you.

·If a man forces himself on you, then absolutely tell
somebody. Society has taught women to feel ashamed or embarrassed for
being molested, even going so far as to claim that some women are "asking
for it." Letting a man get away with a sexual crime teaches him that it is
okay to do it again in the future.

·Report sexual harassment in the workplace or at school. Remember
that reporting these kinds of acts is not just for your own good; it could
prevent the man from harassing other women in the future.

Part Two

Expressing Yourself

1.Stay educated. Being educated not only
gives you the skills and knowledge you will need to pursue your career, it also
makes you more well-respected by the people you encounter in your life. Your
level of education (whether formal or informal) reflects your intelligence and
shows others that you care about things other than your own personal life.

·Remember that not all education has to be formal (i.e. attained
through an institution like a university). Keep up with current events in
politics, science and technology, read books (both fiction and non-fiction),
learn another language, watch documentaries, and so on.

2.Stand up for yourself. Whether you are a man or a
woman, you will have to learn to fend for yourself in the real world if you
want to avoid being taken advantage of. You must learn how to stand up for
yourself at school, at work, and in your social life.

·If you hear somebody making a sexist, racist, or otherwise
disrespectful comment, don't let it slide. This doesn't necessarily mean
engaging in an argument; calmly tell the person that what he or she said is not
appreciated.

·Let people know when they have wronged you. If somebody betrays
you in any way, be sure to let him or her know. This will prevent the person
from repeating the behavior in the future.

3.Take care of your body. Personal strength is
manifested physically, mentally, and emotionally. If you want to be a strong,
independent woman, you need look no further than your own body.

·Exercise for 1 hour every single day. You don't have to be an
Olympic champion to be in good shape; go for a jog around the neighbourhood,
take your dog for a walk, or go for a bike ride. Staying in shape improves your
overall health, your mood, and your energy levels, which will improve your
performance in all aspects of your life.

4.Manage your finances. If you want to be truly
independent, you must learn how to pay for your own life so that you don't have
to rely on other people. Spend your money wisely, and avoid wasteful or
frivolous expenditures.

·Know your income. When evaluating your income, be sure to take
into account the deductions, include state and federal taxes, that will come
out of your gross pay.

·Check your bank statements regularly, and be sure to keep your
own records as well so that you can catch errors.

·Prioritize your spending. Your top priorities should be on your
basic necessities like food, shelter, and clothing. Things like expensive
clothes, concerts, and vacations are luxuries. Learn how to differentiate
between necessities and luxuries.

5.Give to others. One of the best ways you
can exert your strength is to give back to those who are less fortunate than
you. You don't have to be rich or affluent to make a positive impact in your
community, so start small.

·Consider volunteering at a non-profit organization in your
community. Identify what issues you are most passionate about. Volunteer at a
soup kitchen, your local SPCA, or other community development program.

·Practice random acts of kindness. You don't have to become a
formal volunteer to give back. If you see somebody in need, then help them.
Even as small an act as helping somebody carry boxes can brighten up his or her
day.