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Category: music

Hey! My sidebar music player is back! And what’s amazing is that Bryant wasn’t even home to help me figure out how to get the music pumping. I actually did it BY MYSELF. ~Whoa~ Although, he was the one who helped me download it and connect it up and do basically all the confusing stuff I find so intimidating. That was over a month ago. And it’s taken me this long to put it in the sidebar. But still. I feel proud.

And I love the song I’ve got playing there now, in case you couldn’t tell.

School’s out. Finished the quarter. Happy with the work I did. Amazed at how much I learned. Thrilled to be done.

I always get “School’s Out” by Alice Cooper stuck in my head at this time of year. Cooper was once asked what the greatest three minutes of his life were. His response:

There’s two times during the year. One is Christmas morning, when you’re just getting ready to open the presents. The greed factor is right there. The next one is the last three minutes of the last day of school when you’re sitting there and it’s like a slow fuse burning. I said, “If we can catch that three minutes in a song, it’s going to be so big.” *

What’s funny is even after all these years, that feeling doesn’t change. Those last seconds, when you gather your bag, walk to the front, hand your exam to the professor, and then float as you push open the door of the lecture hall and walk into the sunlight… the release is unbelievable. And now, two days after my last exam, I keep getting that feeling of guilt for not using my time to catch up on reading, coupled with the surreal realization that there is no more reading to do.

Suddenly the things that were at the very bottom of the to-do list get promoted to the top. You never had time to do them before, and now they’re the most important things in front of you.

I like it a lot.

*I read that story here, which is the most reliable source in the world, I know. But it’s still a good story.

I was the only one on the road for miles. No lights shone before or behind me, only the stars above and the glowing half-moon. No lamp posts lit my way ahead on the curving canyon road, only my own cockeyed headlights.

Death Cab’s “Passenger Seat” began to play (listen to it in my player over there on the right), and I rolled my window down. Cold, night air poured in. I turned on the heater. I know it might seem ridiculous, but I couldn’t ignore the necessity of an open window as I drove through the deep night in such a tranquil canyon with music like that playing. And since the autumn mountain air is a bit nippy, a blowing heater takes just the right edge off. It’s a method my roommate and I perfected on stressful college nights when we needed a release. Call me crazy, but try it sometime and you’ll understand why I do it.

There was no stress tonight, though. I felt deliciously content. Happy. Beautiful dark mountains, changing seasons, the freedom of a full tank of gas, and the irreplaceable feeling of someone waiting for me at home.

Michael Stipe was telling me about how he’ll take the rain as I drove down the highway and approached my exit. His voice flooded my car. It filled up every possible space, rushed into every corner, to the point of bursting. Nearly.

It was quite possibly a perfect night. The ride up the mountain was just as refreshing as the ride down, as was the company in between.

It’s good for me to change my rhythm every now and again.

Remember being a kid and riding in the car with your friends, the windows down, singing along with your favorite song at the top of your lungs? How come we don’t do that as adults? I hope, many years down the road, after much more life has happened to me, I still find occasion to sing at the top of my lungs with friends in my car.

I can’t for the life of me remember who first introduced me to The Postal Service, which is weird because I usually vividly remember stuff like that. I do know that it was in college. It must’ve been at least by my third year because I’ve got this strong memory of driving north up University Avenue, roommate Star in the passenger seat, windows down, stopped at the light by our sophomore-year apartment, and The Postal Service’s “Such Great Heights” playing on my stereo. It’s a nice relaxing memory. I think it might’ve been spring time, but it may simply be that the feeling of the memory is so refreshing that I associate it with spring. I don’t know.

But in any event, I love this band’s music. I particularly love the song over there in my sidebar at the moment, “Brand New Colony.” (Check out the lyrics here.) The instant the song starts, I can’t help but smile. The intro reminds me of playing classic old video games as a kid, sitting Indian style in front of the living room TV. And the rest of the song manages to capture all the ultra-shmoopy feelings of love (which I’m a total sucker for) without ever getting sickly syrupy. Or maybe you think it is sickly syrupy, but you have to at least admit that they definitely don’t resort to any overused cliches. I love that.

I’ll be the fire escape that’s bolted to the ancient brick where you will sit and contemplate your day.

Maybe this resonates so much with me because I’ve always wanted to be able to climb out my window onto a fire escape and just sit, like Holly Golightly. Who knows.

I can also understand the desire to escape the “tethers of this scene” and the responsibilities of life, armed with nothing and no one except for the one you love most… setting out on an adventure to start fresh and new, full of hope and away from life’s cynics (which, unfortunately, sometimes includes me). I suppose we all probably could go for an escape every now and then, and let “the sun… heat the grounds under our bare feet.”

Sounds like a plan. I may not have a fire escape, but I do have a patio perfect for bare feet and sunshine. Out I go!

You’ll never see the courage I know
Its colors’ richness won’t appear within your view
I’ll never glow the way that you glow
Your presence dominates the judgments made on you

But as the scenery grows, I see in different lights
The shades and shadows undulate in my perception
My feelings swell and stretch; I see from greater heights
I understand what I am still too proud to mention – to you

You’ll say you understand, but you don’t understand
You’ll say you’d never give up seeing eye to eye
But never is a promise, and you can’t afford to lie

You’ll never touch these things that I hold
The skin of my emotions lies beneath my own
You’ll never feel the heat of this soul
My fever burns me deeper than I’ve ever shown – to you

You’ll say, Don’t fear your dreams, it’s easier than it seems
You’ll say you’d never let me fall from hopes so high
But never is a promise and you can’t afford to lie

You’ll never live the life that I live
I’ll never live the life that wakes me in the night
You’ll never hear the message I give
You’ll say it looks as though I might give up this fight

But as the scenery grows, I see in different lights
The shades and shadows undulate in my perception
My feelings swell and stretch, I see from greater heights
I realize what I am now too smart to mention – to you

You’ll say you understand, you’ll never understand
I’ll say I’ll never wake up knowing how or why
I don’t know what to believe in, you don’t know who I am
You’ll say I need appeasing when I start to cry
But never is a promise and I’ll never need a lie

I dig the raw broodiness of this song. In some twisted way, I sometimes wish I could be this internally angsty. But it’s never worked for me. I can’t keep it in. …Almost always.

I used to have the most amazing version of this song. It was on a mix a friend in high school gave to me… Renee gave me a lot of good music that year. Anyway, it was Fiona singing with this gorgeous flowing piano in the background, and that was it. Simple and not overproduced. My CDs got stolen a few years ago and I haven’t been able to find that version since.