Posts

Starting with this video….It shows that this YT channel is not all about singing. It is about my heart, my life! I try to portray that in all my videos: The real, and the genuine of me ( My Heart). My brother asked me one time, ” If I just want a singing career or if I want to make an impact on the world?” I want both but what really matters to me out of the two is making an impact on others (The World). This video is to reach out to the broken and more. Make an impact! Try to make a difference!

This is my video of me recuperating from being sick for 2 weeks. I was trying to sing a Christmas song, but every time I tried to sing I was getting choked by Mr. Mucus!!!, lol. So, I just sung a sweet song about how Jesus Loves Me. I kept it Short But Sweet!!!

I do have another video that I think will touch your heart, that I will post to my YT channel and on WP as well. Love ya’ll and good night!!!

Disclaimer: Below is how I felt earlier and I still feel this way, but with looking at myself in the mirror, I let out a lot of angst and even more. I would of cut out the cussing because I was afraid of what people would think…but then I thought to myself, if I can curse around other people and God hears me, then why am I silencing myself on my blog-especially when I am feeling what I am feeling. I named my blog, “Listen to my heart” for a reason. And not all of my post are going to Angelic. I don’t like cussing at all but sometimes when you are fed up it happens. I am working on stopping my cussing only because of God and how I need to represent Him. Please do not judge me or what is said below, This actually helped me.

HERE IT GOES……..OH, ALSO, IN SOME OF THIS POST, I MIGHT SOUND ALL OVER THE PLACE…..THAT IS BECAUSE I WAS VENTING AND HAD SO MUCH TO SAY BECAUSE I LET MY HEART BUILD UP AND I JUST EXPLODED!!!!! NOW,HERE IT GOES…………….

I sometimes wonder if It is worth fighting to live the life I want? I am getting to the point where I am disassociating myself from everyone because I am learning that you can’t just be around a lot of people. I go to a job that I am not good at. I feel like I am pick on constantly by the supervisor because to her I am not catching on and ” to her” usually by a month everyone catches on.

I feel like people at this job look at me like I am f ***kin’ stupid! When I ask a question. And most people would say, hey go look for another job…. No! That is not going to fix a damn thing- as far as I am concerned. I need to do something that I am good at!!! Which would be singing. But then I stop and think, I am 31 years old…… There are singers now who started earlier and now they are in their prime….How can I start at such ( in my eyes) an old age.

And then I think to myself: All I have is my singing…..God did not give me this voice to just waste it all away…. It is definitely not just for singing just in a church ( do not get me wrong I love singing in church, I love being on stage and worshiping with others -who are on stage and in the congregation). I want to get out in the world and sing and get paid for what I love doing…. My worship to God is priceless and so is sharing my heart.

I’ve notice through the years the jobs that I have worked, I have never been good at….. I must be destined for something more than jobs.

I feel like people want me to put my life on hold for their upcoming and just to forget about how Erica feels and what maybe going on in her life..

My heart yearns for different, my mind yearns for different. I need to venture out and get out of Jacksonville and start a new life…. I am tired of being around just phoniness and bullshit! I feel like if I can’t get what I want in life… Then my life should be cut short….. While I am breathing I want to do better….. I know that starts with me…. But like Jessie J said: It’s Hard To Follow Your Heart, sometimes.

This is how I feel, I need to vent my true feelings….. I could of said more… But this is enough to show you how I feel at this moment. I am hurt… I have a lot on my mind and it’s beyond just work……

Stop thinking that I am OK because you see a fuckin’ smile on my face, Stop thinking because your life is going as plan that I should pick myself up and say just fuck my feelings and be happy for you. Because that is not how it works ( in my eyes , right now).

As I type this, my tears relieve the pain, and aggravation I feel on the inside. No one will ever get Erica or understand her so in return I am viewed as a different person …. Which is cool….I am not going to change for anyone only God and myself.

I would apologize to you for my cussing but I did not give my life to you, I gave it to God and He is the only one that understands. I am not perfect and never will be. I am just showing in this post that this is my feelings for right now and as said before… There is more I could say, but I do not think it would be appropriate

PS. Just venting,

When you be who you are, people will run like roaches…. They will stay around you if you are being phony. Be true to who you are……….. You want people to accept who you are. … You want the real around you not the fake!

Everything I am saying is because of what I am feeling on the inside. I am just fed up and tired of everything.

I did a cover of me singing: We Shall Overcome!!! That song came to my heart because of all of the hate, deaths, murders, bullying, suicides, racism ( which our people fought and died to end that but to no avail we still see it today).

The children are dying younger and younger….And the list goes on. And you try to figure out why Colin Kaepernick did not salute the flag? Because of what it stands for in this day in age. And I don’t blame him and I respect him for what he believes. Until we see change in the negativity and the crap that is happening in this world….Things will continue to get worse. And the crazy thing about it all is: We as people can stop the madness and violence. We have a choice and we have a voice…. We just choose to let satan take control and use us as an experiment. And the more we continue to fight fire with fire there will never be changed.

And Until we start making change and taking a stand like Colin Kaepernick did….This world will continue to go to hell in a hand basket

I really love this song. I sung it at my church a couple of weeks ago and it just touches the depth of my soul. I feel like when you sing the bridge: That there are miracles working in the atmosphere that we can not see. If you believe.

I know I have not posted in a while but I am back! I did a new video last week and I wanted to share it with you on Word Press. I hope you like it. Don’t forget to share, like, and comment on my video. And last but not least: Subscribe to my channel for more upcoming covers of me singing

Here is my new cover of Jesus we love You by Paul McClure. This song means a lot to me, especially with what I was experiencing at the time when I sung this song.#Listen2MyHeart
PS. I am sorry it was not posted Monday. I was so tired. But here it is!!!

As I breathe the air that God has given me, and I have moments where I want to give up and not live any longer. I find myself going straight to God and wanting more of Him in my life. And I am coming to an understanding that I need Him more in every aspect of my life. Do you need Him more? Do you think you have all of Him in your life? Do you think you have enough of Him in your life?

I have this same song on my channel. But the reason that this song was sung again was because God kept putting this verse on my heart: ” Will Your Grace Run Out” And the way I was feeling, I had to sing this song. Because now, there is a different meaning to me of what this song means at this time. Will you allow God to show you how beautiful you are in the midst of your pain and sorrow? This was my worship to God, and I knew He heard His child crying out.