2.5. take a shameless nap on the floor if a student
didn't come to his/her class

3. sleep

4. eat

5. get fat

This is true

i taught English to small Asian people.

To be accurate i also taught Russians, Germans,
Italians, Arabians, Brazilians, etc etc.

i don't know what size they are either.

Actually i didn't teach that many Asians.

Mostly Brazilians.

They're nice

i worked for an online English school. i would
interact with the student or students via an online 'classroom' or through
Skype.

i spoke to so many people over the 4 months that i
worked there. From all over the world! Mothers, doctors, many, many engineers
from Brazil, lawyers, students, high school and university level, retired men
and women, the list is long...

There were many fun and interesting conversations
and lessons, and many boring, tedious and frustrating lessons as well.

Here are some stories from my life as an online
English teacher. Things that were said to me by the many students that i
taught.

"I send you 1000 kisses"

One of my private students told me that he chose me
because he didn't want a female teacher. Imagine his surprise, he informed me,
when this 'Austen Gordon' turned out to be female!

i was amused. Then i uploaded a picture of myself
on my teacher profile.

"I think you need a Russian boyfriend"

My one student told me that he had had about 700
lessons with the company and he was very much aware when the teacher had fallen
asleep during the class. That made me laugh.

For the record i have only fallen asleep
once.

"My name is Jesus and I work at the Brazilian
customer support centre for your company, shhhh, it's a secret"

One of the conversation lessons was entitled,
'Sharing embarrassing stories'.

This Chinese man told me that he discovered that he
had a hole in his pants while walking down the street. He then proceeded to
"grab his buttocks in shame and run down the road". Just picture
that, my dear.

There were students that you had an immediate
connection to that you hoped would book you again for lessons and ones that
were so painful to work with that the very thought of another lesson with them
made you curl up in agony on the inside.

"These are socks, he explained to me, and they
are very 'feetly'.

That was perhaps my favourite English word
invention that i can remember.

There were students with awful sound quality,
really loud background noises and an apparent inability to mute their microphones
when they really needed to. There were the frustrations of the language
barrier, the need to explain something over and over, trying to understand what
the student is trying to say to you. There were also rude students and ones
that didn't bother to listen.

But it was the students that i connected with,
having them understand what was being taught, being able to help them learn and
hearing how pleased they were with themselves as they learnt new words and as
they formed great sentences. It was those students that made the job worth it.
At times it was just a job, but sometimes i was able to see what we as English
teachers are able to do for others. The changes we are able to help facilitate
in the lives of others...

Its def something worth trying out. I just didn't enjoy the particular company I was working with but there are other options. This one was PE based. Try Englishtown. But I am off to Thailand soon to do the English teaching thing in real life! we shall see how that goes :)