Have you ever stopped feeling attracted to your partner?

Ok so I'm using LPSG to sort of come clean on something I feel really guilty about. I was dating this girl for 4 months, and everything was going good. She was a great gf to me, and it was my first real relationship.

For some reason the past month I started to feel less and less attracted to her. Physically she did not change at all, and it's not like she gained more weight or anything. I just found myself not attracted to her anymore. It was like suddenly started to notice things about her that really turned me off.
I feel really shallow about this, and it made me feel really guilty.

I tried to make it work, and ignore it but it ended up eating me up inside and made the last 2 weeks really hard to be around her.

I told her on Wednesday that I just stopped having "Romantic" feelings for her. I really didn't want to hurt her, and did my best to let her down gently without telling her the real reason. I do care about her a lot, and wish I felt differently about her.However I just can't and feel kind of sleazy about the whole thing.

VerifiedGold Member

Absolutely right. And you can't let yourself feel guilty for ending a relationship that has run its course. That is how people get trapped in unhappy situations. Better to be honest now than bury those feelings until you've been married for 15 years, own a house, two cars, and have kids together, and then realize you should have admitted it when you knew.

If your not into her anymore then you should do you both a favor and end it and move on. I actually met a guy and was completely happy with him for about the first 6 months then I sorta lost those feelings and it kinda ended on my end, he was completely into me though and I felt to bad to hurt him so I wound up staying with him for 3+ more years, he lived with me in my house and everything. We finally broke up about 4 months ago shortly after I moved to LA but now I feel like I wasted a good chunk of my 20's being with someone i didn't really want to be with. So don't feel bad about ending a relationship, people always move on, it's hard at first but give it time.

I have a really strong fetish that has to do with apperance. In the past if this was altered, I would no longer feel any attraction towards a person. However I am working through this and focusing on the other parts of a persons body i find attractive to minimise the effect of this fetish. It makes me feel sick inside to feel like this at all.

I most certainly have. I'm going through that right now with my wife. It has nothing to do with her physical appearance, as she looks better now than in years. It has everything to do with a strain in our relationship. That makes extremely difficult for me to feel any romantic or sexual attraction towards her.

You are definitely not alone and I would say that you handled the situation appropriately given the relative immaturity of the relationship.