…are on my mind because I had a checkup with the cardio guy today. I have AVNRT—AV Nodal Reentrant Tachycardia—basically, a short circuit in my heart that makes it speed up for no apparent reason. My cardiologist is a kind man and clearly very smart. I enjoy talking to him about all kinds of things. Today it was horses and Hoosier National Forest and wearing orange during deer hunting season if you’re going to be hiking (or riding) through the woods. I like him. He takes good care of me and this dumb little electrical issue in my heart.

However, he’s young and eager and would really love to fix it with ablation—a procedure where he goes into my heart, maps it, finds the short circuit, and then zaps it dead. He says if he does that, I won’t have to take the beta blockers anymore. No more heart meds is an appealing proposition, but frankly, the idea of letting someone into my heart scares the living daylights out of me. Invasive stuff frightens me. Doc says I’m too young to be saddled with heart meds the rest of my life—he may be right. But honestly, I’m okay with the meds. If things change, if my heart starts getting wonky on the meds, then I’ll think harder about the ablation.

Am I a puss? Probably, but I’m saving my brave for other stuff, like my writing career and husband’s retirement, which is looming. For now, I’ll let the meds take care of my glitchy heart.

Thankful list for today:

Great doctors and amazing medicines

Crisp fall air

Getting to spend an evening with BIL and SIL tonight–a treat!

Skyping with our little guy—he was unbearably precious last night!

Hearing Son say, “Now I get it” to us on the topic of how kids are your heart. I’ve told him so many times that I’ve never loved anyone or anything the way I love him. Last night, he said, “I always heard you, Mom, but I never really got it–I thought you were being melodramatic, even though I was glad you said you felt that way. You really don’t know until you have your own child, do you?” Nope, my Son, you don’t. But I’m so glad for you and DIL that you get to have this overwhelming feeling too. It is wondrous!

Heart stuff is scary and I don’t blame you for not wanting an invasive procedure. It’s all okay for your doctor to look at it as just another “procedure”, but it’s your body that gets invaded.

My gratitude for here today: I’m thankful that your heart meds work and that you are here to write a blog that we can read! And that you have been so helpful to me as I’m looking to start a freelance career.