11.29.2009

After a tossing and turning for hours, Elin Leighterhosen Woods heads to the kitchen for some warm milk only to find her husband Tiger snorting a bit of the Coka Ina. Elin is furious about Reports of Tiger infidelities and now- once again- he's tootin his nose. Frustrated with each other they begin arguing, Tiger grabs Elin by her arms & says "Look Bitch! If it wasn't 4 me you'd still be sniffing baby shit 4 a living! Get off my back!! go carve some clogs or summin!"

Elin, who talks with her hands bcuz she sounds like the chef from the Muppets,

scratches TDubb (thats what they call him in the streets) in the process. Since messing up a brothas face - even a ¼ brotha- is a cause 4 murder, TDubb collects himself & goes out to the escalader with Elin chasing behind him & screaming in Swenglish in the driveway. Tiger speeds into the street & just as the the coke hits him he let's go of the steering wheel to do that junkie dick rub thing and hits the fire hydrant then bounces into the tree.

Elin turns into still upset & grabs a driver from 1 of the 700 sets of golf clubs in the garage proceeds to the car with intentions to threaten Tiger. Seeing he's out of it, her anger turns into worry. She tries to break the window with the club to no avail...that was from the Wal-Mart set. So she goes back & gets an expensive one & uses that one to break the back window which she reaches through to unlock the front door & pull Tiger to safety.

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This blog is for entertainment purposes only. So don't get your chest all swoll up about something I may write chances are I'm right and you're wrong and it'll just make you feel bad when you realize it ;-) ...That was a test LOL!!