For some children friendship skills come easily; while others need a little more practice and help. A great way to introduce and learn about friendship is reading books about friendships together. After reading each book, ask children questions like: Why were the characters friends? What made them good friends? How did they become friends? How did they settle arguments?

Have a discussion with children about what they think makes a good friend. The following are some possible responses:

Charlie Rooster, Johnny Mouse, and Percy the pig are the best of friends. They do everything together. They ride their bike together, play games together, and even do their chores together. Because that's what good friends do. When night falls, though, and it's time to go to bed, they learn that sometimes friends have to be apart. But that's okay, because true friends always find each other, even if it's just in their dreams.

Description: Rainbow Fish is the most beautiful fish in the ocean. His iridescent scales sparkle and shimmer. The other fish ask him to play with them, but all he wants to do is show off his beauty. One day a little fish asks Rainbow Fish to share one of his scales with him, but Rainbow Fish refuses. His selfishness and greed leave him friendless and sad. A wise octopus advises the lonely fish to give away his beauty, which he reluctantly decides to do. With each scale that Rainbow Fish gives away, he grows happier and happier. Rainbow Fish learns the importance of sharing and reaps the joy from giving.

After reading the story, ask children the following questions:

What was so special about Rainbow Fish?

Even though Rainbow Fish was the most beautiful fish in the ocean, was he the nicest?

When the other fish invited him to play, how did he respond? Why do you think he didn’t want to play with the other fish?

What was most important to Rainbow Fish?

Do you think the other fish liked him? Why or why not?

What did Rainbow Fish learn that he needed to do so that the other fish would like him? (Be a good friend, share and enjoy giving, playing together, etc.)

Activity
Provide each child with a paper fish scale and let them decorate it. Have them write on the scale with a black marker or crayon a quality that they think a friend should have. Spread a thin layer of glue over the entire fish and sprinkle lightly with glitter. Let dry. Attach all the scales to a large paper fish and display on the wall or bulletin board.

Extensions:

You’ve Got a Friend
Play some music whose theme is friendship-based, such as “You’ve Got a Friend” by James Taylor or “You’ve Got to Have Friends” by Bette Midler, and have children dance to the music. Stop the music periodically and instruct children to find another child, or friend, to hug. Variation: When you stop the music, instruct children to find another child, or friend, to dance with. Start the music, have the pair hold hands, and dance together. Stop the music again and instruct each pair to find another pair, or friends, to join them. Continue playing and stopping the music until all the pairs are joined together.

Hands of Friendship Wreath
Trace around children’s hands on white paper with a black marker and cut out. Provide a variety of flesh-colored crayons or markers to children and let them color their hand shapes. Write or let children write their names on their hands. Join hands together to create a large friendship wreath and display on the wall or on your bulletin board.

Fishing for Friends
Have children glue photos of themselves onto metal juice can lids. If desired, let child decorate lids with stickers. Attach magnets to string and the string to homemade fishing poles made of sturdy sticks that are about four to five feet long. Have children sit in a circle. Then, scatter the lids in the middle of the circle. Give one or two children a fishing pole and let them “fish” for a friend by dangling their rod over the lids in the center of the circle. Continue until all children have had a chance to fish.

Hello, My Friend
Have children form a circle. Choose one child to sit in the middle of the circle. Have him/her cover or close his/her eyes. Have another child go up to the child in the middle of the circle and say, “Hello, my friend, can you guess who I am?” The child in the middle gets three guesses. The child who spoke gets to sit in the middle and the child in the middle gets to choose another speaker.

Will You Be a Friend of Mine?
Have children sit in a circle. Choose one child to walk around the circle as you sing the song below with children. When the song ends, the child taps the child closest to him/her and says that child’s name. The child tapped then gets to walk around the circle and tap a “friend.”

Will You Be a Friend of Mine?
(Tune: Mary Had a Little Lamb)

Will you be a friend of mine?
Friend of mine?
Friend of mine?
Will you be a friend of mine?
___________ (Name of child walking around circle.)

You are a friend of mine,
Friend of mine,
Friend of mine.
You are a friend of mine
My friend is _____________. (Name of child who is tapped.)

Friends come in all colors and sizes; they can be funny or serious, musical or athletic, outgoing or quiet. This book reminds children to celebrate their differences because that is what makes each of us so special.