A company called Terra Vivos is building underground timeshare communities "built to withstand a 50-megaton nuclear blast 10 miles away, 450mph winds, a magnitude-10 earthquake, 10 days of 1,250°F surface fires, and three weeks beneath any flood." Asteroids, nuclear war or angels with trumpets—you'll survive them all trapped with neighbors under a mountain.

Tatiana Danger

It's a modern-day Noah's ark for the nuclear generation. It will house thousands of DNA samples and withstand a 20 megaton nuclear blast. Today, you can secure your space in this Kansas-based survivalist community shelter for only $25,000. It's called Terra Vivos, and it's the world's largest doomsday timeshare.

The shelter is located 50-150ft below the Missouri River bluffs, in part of a former limestone mine, known as the Atchison Storage Facility. This facility served as a secure bunker complex for the U.S. government since World War 2 up until 2013, when the company behind the Vivos Survival Shelter and Resort acquired a large portion of the 2.7 million sq. ft. underground storage facility. The Vivos shelters will also come with their very own "Cryovaults" that will house "reproductive gamete cells and DNA of humans and animals for a potential re-population of the Earth."

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Here's how the Vivos Group is marketing their Doomsday timeshares:

People are sensing that a global life-changing event is just ahead. The governments of the world have been bunkering up for decades. What do they know? Why is nobody telling you to prepare? Obviously, to avoid a mass panic. What is your plan? Will your family be victims, or survivors in one of our shelters. The accepted solution to most of the threat scenarios is to find underground shelter. The soil of the Earth itself can provide the best shelter for most catastrophes, including a pole shift, super volcano eruptions, solar flares, earthquakes, asteroids, tsunamis, nuclear attack, bio terrorism, chemical warfare and even widespread social anarchy. The governments of the world have been busy building vast underground shelter complexes for the elite. What do they know? The rest of us are on our own, without a long-term survival solution.

Tens of thousands of people have applied for living quarters inside the survivalist community. Potential community members are screened and reviewed based on their skill sets and what they can contribute to the community. The company has both "Luxury Class" shelters and "Economy Class" shelters. It's good to know that when the shit hits the fan and we have to rebuild society, there's already a socio-economic hierarchy to guide us.

Think it's silly to prepare for the end of the world by investing in Vivos? Well, you won't be laughing when global thermonuclear war starts, or we get hit with a killer comet, or a massive plague spreads, solar flares, chemtrails, or fucking shark tsunamis!