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As I mentioned before, New Year’s Eve was über-fun and über-brutal. The long and short of it is I paid for acting like a non-parent.

This little story sums it up nicely. The morning of New Year’s Day – a mere six hours after we’d rung in the new year and a mere four hours after I’d fallen into bed like a spaghetti Western stunt man – I went to feed Seabass like I always do at 6:30am. But as I pulled the nursing bra flap down, what should fall out and cascade off my precious baby’s face before hitting the floor? A tube of red lipstick.

Classy.

We spent New Year’s Eve at a restaurant downtown that shut its doors, turned down the lights, cranked the tunes and poured liberal quantities of gloriously good wine. Meeting up with a few other couples – all of them parents of babies, as well – we danced and laughed and sipped our way from 9pm to 2:30am like our younger selves of yore. The only noticeable difference was that we all held our phones pretty tightly, in case the babysitter called. But I’d entrusted Grandma and Grandpa with Baby Seabass at home, so I felt free. I felt light.

More to the point: I felt like I had to make up for lost time.

One of my fellow moms Facebooked me the next day (can Facebook be a verb now that it’s gone public?) with the following message:

It was a great night…up until I have no memory of it, which was around 11:45ish, and then it is all left to others to fill in the blanks for me. Party virgin is an understatement for me – I get the title of Party Amateur. Goodness what was I thinking, to drink Gin n Tonics like it was pre-baby days.

It may not be much of a controversy, but it’s certainly a conundrum: How do you balance the fun of adulthood with the responsibility of parenthood?

11 Responses to “Controversy Wednesday: ACTING LIKE A NON-PARENT AGAIN”

I too dealt with a not so pleasant New Year’s Day. As much fun as it is to be “baby free”, it was a reminder of how I’d much rather go to sleep and not drink so I can enjoy the day with my little guy. Until he is old enough to not require my attention so much, I need to party like a mommy and less like my former self. But since it is only every blue moon, I think it’s ok. The real controversy is when it is a regular habit – like a lifestyle – and compromises the care of the child.

Cost benefit analysis. Night out on the town is sometimes worth the rough payback the following day OR you could have had a rip roarin’ NYE like I did: Scrabble tourney with my parents and husband while the kids snored away on the couch.

I’m 26 with two kids and most of my friends are just recently married — they’re not even thinking about having kids so its hard constantly having to say no to invitations out because I’m too tired, too broke, don’t have a babysitter or would just rather be with my family. But sometimes I think you need to go out and remember that you’re a person outside of being a mother. When I’ve gone back to Chicago (where I’m from) to visit friends and family its been great to party with my friends as if I was just a twenty something like them, but then I get to go back and cuddle in bed with my family and watch TV and I realize its great to go out sometimes, but I’d never trade what I have to do it all the time.

Well said. We were the LAST to have kids in our group of friends, so we didn’t go out nearly as much as we should have even before Seabass was born! Everyone else was home with their kids at night, so more often than not, we were home watching way too many movies.