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Like Mother, Sorta Like Son

I have my theories about Jack coming by his issues honestly. I’ve heard that lots of parents don’t get their own diagnoses until their children get theirs. I don’t have a diagnosis, but it’s not for lack of my own issues.

There are lots of quirks I share with Jack. There are also lots that I don’t. Both Jack and I have sensory issues. But while Jack gravitates toward sensory input, I shirk from it.

I broke the news to Alex one day while we were driving. “You know how I’m always thinking that I have one disorder or another?” I asked. “I think I have Sensory Processing Disorder.”

He kindly (and quickly) came back with, “Maybe you have more than one disorder.” Thanks, Sweetie. (And by “Sweetie,” I mean, “Jackass”.)

I do enough oversharing here at Stimeyland, so I don’t need to list all of my crazy symptoms here. (I’ll parse those out when I need blog fodder.) Suffice it to say, when we got home this evening and there was barely perceptible music coming from a house down the street, it took everything I had not to (completely) freak out. I had to abandon my kids’ bedtime routine and retreat to a back room with my iPod Shuffle.

It’s kind of a bummer, but I think it’s helpful for me in my interactions with Jack to have some sense of what it’s like when you’re absolutely driven toward (or away from) something. It’s also been educational for me to realize that I am not just weird about things, but that I am wired in a way that makes me weird about things.

Having a name and a cause for my quirkiness doesn’t make it any easier to deal with music from across the street or, say, putting my hands in water, but somehow it does make me feel better about it. And that’s a start.

12 thoughts on “Like Mother, Sorta Like Son”

I have information-diclosure-abundance disorder too! And big time auditory overload issues. I understand…. when my kids bug me, it’s because their issues are triggering my mommy love and the guilt almost strangles you…

oh stimey. we are sistas !!! i swear there has been many a night where i can hear the bass of someone’s music that it drives me crazy, yet my husband has to strain to hear it. I have been learning so much about myself as i learn about my daughter and her issues. I know i have something and have passed it along. just the other night hubby and i were discussing how she still can not use a spoon well, and i explained how she won’t hold the bowl with her other hand. then i said i have that problem when doing dishes that i don’t want to touch certain things so i hold on lightly. he looked at me and said WHAT ??? really ? and i am thinking. ok it is ME, not everyone feels this. where do you live again, we need to hang out

Me too. I have some of the stimulation-seeking and some of the stimulation-shirking. Joey’s first preschool teacher was hilarious. We would be talking about some of the stuff Joey does, and I would counter with that being normal because I did it when I was a kid, and she’s STARE at me with “the look” before sighing and saying something like, “you know autism is probably partly genetic, right?”

I’m not autistic, but I do have some serious sensory quirks that drove my mom mad when I was little.

I think this is fascinating and often ponder about my own sensory issues and how they may or may not relate to Nik’s. Isn’t it nice to know that we not only are NOT alone but that we’re not crazy either!?

Hmmm…Hi Stimey. I too get really distressed with ambient noises at times. Then I get stressed from being stressed about them. Cuz no one else is. I’ve got to think about this. And I can’t speak for my son’s propensity for similar stress, but I can tell you that I’m very much like my own mom. Ah yes…anxiety…

I know what you mean about feeling better when you have a name for something. When I got diagnosed with OCD, I felt a LOT better. I mean, no whenever I start freaking out, I can talk myself down by saying, ‘it’s just the OCD, it’s not a real thing, move on’, and it helps. It’s not gone, but it’s categorized as something that’s not a crisis, and I can move on.

I can relate. My husband can never figure out why the kids and I will sit on the floor messing with our sock seams for 10 minutes in the morning. And he just doesn’t.care.about.his. It makes me cringe just to think of it.

We always say my oldest got the worst of both of our personalities. Control-freakishness, sensory aversions, OCD, anxiety, anger-management… at least one of us understands him most of the time.

SPD is a PITA. My son has it, we’re in the throes of OT for it. My husband thinks he might have had it as a kid but learned to adapt. I know my brother had sensory issues and has either adapted or let us know that if we touch the tips of his toes again he’s going postal on our asses. ;) Me? I’m perfect. Bwahahahahahahaha….from the woman who has such a hard time with stress….bwahahahahahahahaha….

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Stimey believes rodents are funny, autism may be different than you think, and that if you have a choice between laughing and crying, you should always try to laugh—although sometimes you may have to do both.