Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Okay, I need to start 2010 over because it was off to a particularly gnarly start. You'd think that being technically on vacation in Mexico in January things would be pretty sweet but no. Some combination of the gringo chisme of cheating husbands, kidnapped rich guys, cold rain, spare furnishings and oh yeah, my dead daughter's birthday anniversary all conspired to put me into the worst frame of mind I can remember being in since the dark days before we left Mexico. Ick ick ick! I kept telling myself to snap out of it, look on the bright side, count my blessings, be grateful, get over it, chill the fuck out - but it didn't work! Unbelievable! Next time I give the Bunny those commands when she's in a funk maybe I'll remember that sometimes it just doesn't work.But today I woke up and felt okay again. Like a totally normal version of me being fine and generally happy, even though it is still POURING rain and it's chilly and our side of the house is not only sparsely furnished with spotty internet signal but it's also been taken over by Augustine who's chipping holes in the walls all over the place. Thank God huh? Seriously, if I'd woken up in the same mood I was in yesterday I don't want to think about how ugly it would have been especially without access to a treadmill. I only managed to remain even moderately sustainable for the past month because I've been getting so much exercise here but today it's looking like a day off, what with the flood outside and Auggie monopolizing our living space.