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My body clock’s alarm rang and I stirred this morning round about 7am. Reached for my iPhone as usual to check the time and saw two notifications from the NY Times App which accelerated my ability to awake fully. “22 People Dead” it said, “Shooting in the US” – I clicked through the Notifications to read the full details of how a young man walked into a school his mother was teaching in, shot his mother, shot her very young students, shot the Principal and other members of staff, before taking his own life.

This is nothing short of a tragedy.

As I reeled from the effects of the journalistic words of the NY Times article, I, like you, started thinking of reasons this could have happened. Was the young man’s mother overworked? Did he hate his mother for not being there for him? Did he misunderstand that his the care and attention that she showed her students brings home the bacon? Why are there still guns in public spaces in America? Is America the only Western Democracy to still allow weapons that freely? What are the solutions, if any, that can be deployed in this instance? An outright ban of weapons in the States? A witch-hunt of all young men whose mother teaches kindergarten?

As my mind raced ahead and came back to explore different rabbit holes of thinking, and raced ahead again, I have two solid points I keep coming back to:

1. Archaic Rules

The right to bear arms, I understand through my 30 years of experience watching Hollywood movies, is in the American Constitution. I bring you to the attention of (Wikipedia) why this amendment was made in the Constitution:

“In no particular order, early American settlers viewed the right to arms and/or the right to bear arms and/or state militias as important for one or more of these purposes:

Besides “facilitating a natural right of self-defense” – I don’t see how carrying a handgun could, for example, deter a tyrannical government, or say repel an invasion in this day and age.

This, fundamentally, is an archaic rule for an archaic time. I am in no position to judge as I do not fully understand the workings of the American legal system, but, fundamentally, this, in my opinion, is an outdated ruling.

2. Weapons and Community

Another point I want to make is that weapons, if you want it to be effective, need to be owned and used in a safe, disciplined and regimented environment. The people of old (circa “right to bear arms” era) were bound by religious and cultural norms (not to say that that was particularly effective), martial arts students are bound by discipline and highly organised competition outlets of their power and skill, soldiers are trained to be highly respectful of their weapons and even gang members are bound by a strict code of conduct,. In all of these cases, access to a weapon is not given until the member of the particular community has reached a certain level of maturity and trust – sometimes taking decades of going through the checks and balances.

In modern life, these checks and balances are eroding. The family unit is breaking apart and there is minimal supervision given by parents. This is the fault of society and our own greed, culminating over the past century, addicted to accelerated growth. Being so engrossed in work, just to survive, is being used as an excuse by parents – “Day care will be good enough.” – “Surely the school will let me know when my child is misbehaving.” Sadly, when the warning bells sound, it might just be too late.

Do I think that guns are dangerous? Yes.
Do guns cut short people’s lives unnecessarily? Yes.

However, I don’t think that guns in itself are the problem here. If you take away the guns, there will be something else used – you don’t have to kill someone to take their life. What motivates a human being to murder another human being? Hate. Hate is the only thing that will motivate a person enough to even consider taking someone’s life. So if hate is the reason these shootings keep occurring in whatever form it may be – hate of society, hate of “the system”, hate of people close to you, what is the solution?

LoveThe opposite of hate. Love. Genuine love. Care. Concern. A genuine interest and desire to help, assist people. A selfless act, for the greater good. A sense of belonging, a sense of community and true communication – a sense of my voice matters in all this. A sense of contribution. A sense of actionable change, and a sense of, “Hey, I made this change happen.” These, and many others, acts and characteristics rooted in love, is the way forward.

Life this past year I must admit has been busy and hectic. At times I’ve felt like giving up but being young and full of ambition, I knew that’s not an option.

I’ve always made choices and stuck with it no matter what the circumstances are. Be it family, love, relationships, friendships, work, activity, games, shopping – anything and everything for that matter. If I’ve made up my mind, nothing can change it – I will pummel through. I might be wrong but I will still pummel through. It might be tough but I will pummel. Some call it pride, I call it stubbornness and true strength.

Don’t get me wrong, I will cry at the drop of a hat and when I see things which touch my heart, no doubt I will show emotion. I think emotion and having a strong will is two entirely different things.

Anyway, so this past year have seen a lot of pummeling, a lot of what-ifs and a lot of I-don’t-have-no-choice. But you know what, at the end of that, it all paid off.

I read somewhere that Gen Y-ers start their career pretty late – I am one of those.

I just don’t see the point of rushing everything – life is meant to be enjoyed at this age (and at any age for that matter). I am glad I have spent this amount of time in a “not-real” job – I don’t think I would have it any other way if my life were to repeat again. The things I’ve learnt – the people I’ve met – the stories I’ve heard – the dresses I’ve seen – the pride, the humility, the hurt, the joy – meeting people this way has opened my senses to a whole new way of thin-slicing situations and people.

Without this experience, I don’t think I would be who I am today.

A job is a job. A career is the same. They may come quick and they may fade quick. Money. That too will come and go. But the only thing that we constantly have to treasure and keep are relationships. When you’re out of a job, out of money and diseased – what remains? Who remains is the question.

Nothing else matters when you have nothing – but that hand rested upon yours, crossed over your shoulders. You know that at the end another human will get you your heart’s needs.

The world is a social place and we have to understand that everything revolves around people. The finance industry is made up of people. If you take the humans out, the stock market will collapse.

The super important and essential part of our lives is relationships with people – and this is the key message for me for the past few years. The ability to build relationships – to learn and to refine my approaches. All this is crucial. I do not regret a single minute.

But now I look forward to start my career and in my new role in an equally new and exciting industry.

Went downstairs to get some breakfast today – not the usual Saturday morning bacon & eggs though – inspired by Clipper Cafe’s (Glebe Point Road) amazing (and not to mention uber healthy) avocado spread, I went and got myself some avocado and ham; avoiding all fatty products altogether.

I went down to the last aisle of the minimart and saw an elderly lady about 5 feet tall staring at the cold storage section. The section where they sell butter, milk and bacon. She had a basket in her hands and she was wearing an old lady’s cardigan with a longish straight skirt. She had socks on complete with black shoes for walking. She could hobble but mobility, I could tell, was not her forte.

I turned right after I saw her and picked up a fresh avocado. Wanted to pick up some cold ham so I stood next to her looking for stuff. She must have felt uncomfortable cause she moved a little when I approached. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to say hello but only managed a smile. And its one of those indirect smiles too. Hmmm… I should’ve said hello but what would I have said?

Arggh… Old people are my weakness I tell you. If you put an old person in front of me and asked me to donate a million thousand dollars, I would probably do it. Its an automatic thing I guess, they seem so helpless. I think I’ve mentioned it in this blog before but that’s the fact and frailty of human life isn’t it? You have your strongest years in your youth and slowly deteriorate into being a weak, slow and helpless human.

In a western country like Australia, you often see old people being neglected and left to fend themselves. It’s a very saddening fact and often I think of ways to combat this on a bigger level. Not sure what kinda support I would get but it is a fact that even if a ministry or organization is set up for our senior citizens, it wouldn’t be a business of high return. And then of course there would be surmounting medical bills etc but old people do not want to be sick! Who does right???

Aging. Getting old.

It’s a natural thing. Terrible, debilitating and sometimes even humiliating. But again everyone goes through it.

I guess that’s my only comfort. That everyone will get old. Everyone will experience forgetting stuff as memories slip away. Every single human will try their very best to get the perfect hair dye to hide the greys. That you and I will need crutches one day; will need people to help us on and off buses and help us learn to use this thing called the Internet. And how to use ATMs…

And people will forget what you and I used to do. Forget that we used to drive manual cars. Forget how the Japs invaded Malaya. Forget that we used petrol for fuel. Forget that Richard Nixon was president. Forget that we saw the first African American become president. Forget when bicycles were used instead of cars. Forget that we were there when 9/11 happened. Forget that to get clothes; it had to be tailored. Forget that we were there when Sadam Hussein was executed.

That’s the only comfort I have. That my turn will come. So I don’t have to feel that bad for senior citizens I guess.

Ah… So sad. I nearly burst into tears thinking of the old lady and what potentially could be her day-to-day life at the minimart today. Thank God she didn’t select only the Home Brand products. This old lady had class and obviously wasn’t on a mere below the poverty line government pension. That’s my other comfort today – even though she was alone, found it hard to walk and does her shopping on a Saturday morning; she was trudging along just fine. Despite her soft voice and her trembling hands; she was fine.

She even had time to dye her hair brown – greys hairs absorb the colour better I heard her say in the silence.