Friday, March 17, 2017

After what feels like one million years, we finally made it to the end of this season of The Bachelor. In a surprise twist — just kidding! — Nick picked Vanessa. See below for what Rebecca, Chelsea, and Rae thought of the finale.

What did you think of the proposal? Do you think these crazy kids will make it?

Rebecca: Meh. I guess it was sweet. No matter how much dislike I have for the Bachelor and/or the woman he chooses, I always get a little smile on my face because it’s nice to watch two people (at least pretend to) be in love and happy and have a nice proposal. But in After the Final Rose, they both just looked miserable and uncomfortable. They definitely will not make it — they can’t even agree on which country to live in! And they flat-out said they had doubts about being together. You could tell that Vanessa’s desperate attempt at dodging the “is a wedding in your future?” question was total BS. Being the good person that I am, obviously I don’t wish any sadness/heartbreak on them, so best of luck to Nick and Vanessa — they’ll need it.

Chelsea: I mean, these two were super cute to watch all year, and we knew from the first couple episodes that Vanessa would be the wife. But I don't see these kids making it past a year. I hope they prove me wrong, but I still think Nick had more chemistry with Amanda in Paradise than any of the other girls this year. He also really didn't deserve any of the lovely women this season. Vanessa is super smart but girl needed to dumb it down for a week and watch a season of this show. I hope she makes it long enough to keep the ring.

Rae: Yeah, I agree with both of you. I like that they are being so open and honest about where they are at, but it also doesn’t bring me much confidence they are going to last. I hope they do, I guess?

What the heck was that thing they did with Rachel on After the Final Rose?

Rebecca: Poor girl. Why did they pick the weirdest and most awkward guys for her to meet first? I cringed and gagged a little when what’s-his-name said the thing about “going black and not going back.” The only guy I thought wasn’t weird/creepy/waaaaay overstepping was the last guy. He seemed a little bland, but attractive and nice. I will gather a group of angry Bachelor Nation folks and track down those producers and RIOT if they don’t give her a better selection, because that was just uncomfortable. And she does NOT deserve anything less than the best group of guys possible.

Chelsea: I really cannot even talk about it and I'm trying to block it from my memory. I'm just so glad it's over and that they get rid of all the dudes that appeared. Big no to them all.

Rae: It was horrible! She was clearly so uncomfortable, and the guys were also so uncomfortable and weren’t sure what to do, and it was just terrible. I knew when they said they had a surprise that it was going to be something awful.

Any final thoughts on this season?

Rebecca: Thank God it’s over! They truly needed someone like Corinne simply to inject some life into this season. Her antics and my love for Raven and Rachel were the only things keeping me going this season. Vanessa is so boring and Nick is just obnoxious. I’m ready for Paradise and The Bachelorette. Anything will be better than this mess of a season.

Chelsea: Again, Nick did not deserve any of those girls and I'm waiting for him to get kicked off Dancing with the Stars THAT IS MY BREAK SHOW BETWEEN THESE WONDERFUL GARBAGE SEASONS. I'm just ready for Rachel and Paradise. I hope they find better contestants than the four we saw on the finale. Also, who thought three hours of the finale and After the Final Rose would be a good idea. Monday was the longest night of my life — only falling behind this past election. That was just TOO MUCH.

Assuming I did well on our Fantasy League, I'd like to thank the Academy, the hot tub questions, and the US Weekly in the grocery store checkout for being my rock. It was tough competition and I'm sorry I forgot about you for a couple weeks there, but you made this season more fun than it should have been.

Rae: I am so ready for Rachel’s season and so over this one. Man, those last few episodes were truly a slog.

And here are the final results of the season’s Fantasy Bachelor League!