Now I don't want to startle anyone, so take a good deep breath and sit yourself down. The Ashlee Simpson Show is ten years old. TEN. It's unbelievable! The wonderful reality show that gave you the true story of Jessica's little sister, including her battle with severe acid reflux and the release of her debut album, premiered on June 16, 2004. I don't know about you, but I spent a summer at my aunt and uncle's house basking in the light of their cable — I didn't have it back home — and watching The Ashlee Simpson Show. As a result, this made me think I needed straight hair with bangs that I would constantly flip out of my eyes and a musician boyfriend. Ah, to be young again!

To celebrate the tenth (TENTH!) anniversary of The Ashlee Simpson Show, here are eight lessons T-ASS taught us. (None of the lessons were to call it T-ASS, but that definitely should have been a thing.)

1. Don't Go on Saturday Night Live Unless You're Prepared

Of course you remember Ashlee Simpson's SNL lip-syncing debacle that ended in her doing a jig on the stage while her music carried on without her, but did you remember that it was covered on an episode of her show? On the episode, we got to see that the whole thing happened because she lost her voice due to her acid reflux and had to perform with a backing track. Yes, there was a logical explanation for this:

2. Bangs are Cool

And the more they cover your face the better. Or at least this was the case in 2004. Side bangs were huge back then.

3. Black Hair Is Edgy

Speaking of hair, dying it black makes you 100 percent more edgy. See?

Cute:

Edgy:

4. Ryan Cabrera Happened

Remember when Ryan Cabrera was popular and Ashlee Simpson dated him? Remember when the spikiness of his hair defined gravity?

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That hair is magical.

5. Cargo Capris Are a Valid Style Option

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6. Who Josh Henderson Is

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Ashlee's boyfriend on the show before Ryan Cabrera was Josh Henderson. In 2004, aside from being on The Ashlee Simpson Show, he was known for winning the second season of The WB series Popstars. (As a side note, the first season winner was Nicole Scherzinger. What was this show?!) In 2014, he stars on the reboot of Dallas.

7. If You Want Her Autobiography, Baby, Just Ask Her

That theme song was soooo catchy.

8. Controversies Are Cleared Up Best on TRL

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Ashlee had a phone interview with TRL (not with Carson Daly unfortunately, but you can watch the entire thing here) following the SNL incident. There are two things that are amazing about this. One, TRL was the place where entertainment issues had to be straightened up and, two, that this was so important that a phone interview was necessary.

9. Pieces of Me Was the Perfect for Singing Alone in Your Room

And hoping no one caught you. The best way to sing it was to be alone doing homework and wondering what it would be like if you had your own show.

10. Ashlee Is Cooler Than Jessica

I mean, she dyed her hair black. Did you really need any more evidence of her coolness than that?

11. And Her Music Is Much More Fun

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These days, Ashlee is raising her son, Bronx, and preparing for her wedding to Evan Ross. Man, times have really changed. (For Ashlee at least. If you feel the need to go pop in your old Autobiography CD, I don't blame ya.)