Oscar Review 2015

Was something amiss? I was so excited for Neil Patrick Harris to host the 87th Academy Awards presentation, however, shortly after his fun opening number, I immediately missed the comedy of Ellen! There was star power, but where were the legends? Nicholson, Spielberg, Angelina’s leg, Hopkins, Pharrell’s hat, Hans Solo, Benifer, Streisand? Jennifer Lopez found a way to get invited, again. There was fashion. Adam Levine’s wife was there, Emma Stone looked gorgeous. Oprah was there. There were movies, but I think the show missed something. I’ve got it—Adela Dazeem!

I don’t know, I feel like it’s trying to be Laura Ingalls Wilder goes to the Oscars.

J. Lo will have her murdered after the show.

Faith Hill needs to go back to the blonde bob. Her dress isn’t awful but reminds me of a 1980’s Barbara Mandrell and the Mandrell Sisters dress.

The Men

David Oyelowo in maroon.

Jared Leto in blue.

Batman in black.

Strahan in grey.

NPH in Light Grey. David Bertka in white and black

Best Dressed Man

Eddie Redmayne in navy!

Other hot men

Bradley Cooper

Common

Chris Pine

Chris Evans

Well hello there Uncle Jesse.

The Couples

HOT

Kelly and Michael

Justin Theroux and Jen Aniston

Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan Tatum

Kevin Hart and his lady. He may be short, but he’s packin’ – Whoa!!!

Chris Pratt and Anna Feris

Chrissy Teigan and John Legend

Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine

NOT

Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman

Faith Hill and Tim McGraw – Too skinny Tim! Too matronly Faith.

Who the fu** invited him back?

Best Dressed

EMMA STONE

2. Behati Prinsloo

3. Chrissy Teigan (and Angelina’s leg)

4. Anna Kendrick

5. Jennifer Aniston

6. Rosamund Pike

7. Reese Witherspoon

8. Cate Blanchet

9. Kerry Washington

10. Margot Robbie

Honorable Mention – Jennifer Hudson-what a difference 8 years and thousands of dollars and a stylist makes!

Hated It

Laura Dern – “Full Metal” Strapless

Marion Cotillard – potato sack couture

Oh shoot, Oprah really cut the budget on Gayle’s dress this year.

Nicole Kidman in Shrinky Dink Chic.

Viola-tion Davis

It just gets worse. Have the damn baby already.

Nope, not Helena Bonham Carter’s daughter.

Jessica Chastain usually shows up. Too much draping.

Felicity, oh Felicity, this is not the remake of a Disney princess movie, it’s the Oscars.

The Show

Did anyone else get chills during the opening segment when Anna Kendrick came in and harmonized with NPH? Or did you have a flashback to the 80’s and Rob Lowe’s infamous song and dance with Snow White?

I love that Lupita Nyong’o’s brother is sitting next to Jack Black! Remember him basically boxing his sister out of the famous selfie from last year?

They said there will be more African Americans at this years Oscars than ever. Who thought, “Let’s get Eddie Murphy?”

Documentary Short winner is a cat’s fuzzy ball dream.

Just when you thought nothing could be worse than the dancing banana in Katie Perry’s Super Bowl Halftime Show, “Everything Is Awesome” happened at the Oscars.

NPH in tighty whiteies? He’s invited back next year!

Oh look, it’s Patricia Arquette reading from a piece of paper, at a microphone, holding an award…..again. We all knew you were going to win, including you, memorize, you’re an actress!

Jennifer Hudson’s power number, “Can’t Let Go”, from the tv show SMASH was a little much after the death montage, but he looked stunning!!

She HATES him!

“Why are you touching my face?”

“Why is he still touching my face?”

“I hate him.”

“Benedict Cumberbatch, it’s not only the most awesome name in show business, it’s also the sound you get when you ask John Travolta to announce Ben Affleck.”

Was it me or did Steve Carell have several doppelgängers in the audience? Patricia Arquette’s man, the dude behind John Legend when he won….

The new Ben and Matt…..Common and John.

Bradley Cooper’s mother ain’t got time for that(standing ovation)!

John Legend and Common are hot! That’s all.

Gaga killed it!! Effortless. Stunning! Then Maria! Stop it!!!

Oh man, that young man, Graham Moore, wow how personal and inspirational. And yes, thank you Oprah! And then Uncle Jesse standing and clapping with a proud look. Tears. “Stay weird. Stay different.”

John Travolta is still touching Idena Menzel’s face backstage.

The Academy agreed with me, Boyhood was Boring. As. Hell.

Feeling bad for Michael, but excited for Eddie(so genuinely excited and surprised!!) and Julianne(finally! deserving!) and Birdman. I love NPH, but not his best effort tonight. I guess I’ll leave it at this because she makes everything better.