Putin to Attend Trump Inaugural, Accompanied by Two Million Troops, the Russian Air Force and 17 Squadrons of Tanks and Armored Carriers

Trump and GOP ‘Welcome Putin and Russia’s enthusiastic support, when so many unpatriotic Americans will not stand with our President!’

NYC – The Trump Inauguration Committee “proudly” announced today that the vast number of empty seats at their candidate’s swearing-in ceremony will be “graciously filled” by Russian President Vladimir Putin “and two million of his very best military friends.”

Several fly-overs by the Russian air force have been scheduled, together with a spectacular parachute jump onto the White House lawn by two thousand elite airborne troops carrying “symbolic” AK-47s.

Tweeting from Trump Tower early this morning, an ecstatic President-Elect expressed his “profound relief” to Mr Putin “and the millions of his freedom-loving friends.”

“Lying media said no one would attend!” Mr Trump tweeted four minutes later. “Ha! Ha! Trump beats Obama by a yuuge mile! So there!”

According to Kellyanne Goebbels, Mr Trump’s spokeswoman, the seventeen squadrons of Russian tanks and other military vehicles will be stationed in and around Washington, New York and Los Angeles “as a fraternal gesture between our peace-loving peoples.”

Besides, the leaders added reassuringly, Mr Putin’s tanks and other vehicles would all be flying both the Russian and US flags as a sign of the “growing unity” between our two great nations. Russian soldiers would also carry and periodically wave Old Glory at their American hosts.

The arrival of Mr Putin and his fellow celebrants, together with their air-force buddies and decorative motorized armor, will begin at ports and landing strips throughout the country on Wednesday morning.