Three German cruisers are sunk by ships of the Royal Navy in the Battle of Heligoland Bight, the first major naval battle of World War I.

1938

The first degree given to a ventriloquist's dummy is awarded to Charlie McCarthy--Edgar Bergen's wooden partner. The honorary degree, "Master of Innuendo and Snappy Comeback," is presented on radio by Ralph Dennis, the dean of the School of Speech at Northwestern University.

1941

The German U-boat U-570 is captured by the British and renamed Graph

1944

German forces in Toulon and Marseilles, France, surrender to the Allies.

One of the largest demonstrations in the history of the United States, the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, takes place and reaches its climax at the base of the Lincoln Memorial when Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. delivers his "I have a dream" speech.

1965

The Viet Cong are routed in the Mekong Delta by U.S. forces, with more than 50 killed.

1968

Clash between police and anti-war demonstrators during Democratic Party's National Convention in Chicago.

1979

Irish Republican Army (IRA) bomb explodes under bandstand in Brussels' Great Market as British Army musicians prepare for a performance; four British soldiers wounded.

After being interviewed by the school administration, the prospective teacher said: "Let me see if I've got this right. You want me to go into that room with all those kids, correct their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse, monitor their dress habits, censor their T-shirt messages, and instill in them a love for learning. You want me to check their backpacks for weapons, wage war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, and raise their sense of self esteem and personal pride. You want me to teach them patriotism and good citizenship, sportsmanship and fair play, and how to register to vote, balance a checkbook, and apply for a job. You want me to check their heads for lice, recognize signs of antisocial behavior, and make sure that they all pass the final exams. You also want me to provide them with an equal education regardless of their handicaps, and communicate regularly with their parents in English, Spanish or any other language, by letter, telephone, newsletter, and report card. You want me to do all this with a piece of chalk, a blackboard, a bulletin board, a few books, a big smile, and a starting salary that qualifies me for food stamps. You want me to do all this, and then you tell me...... I CAN'T PRAY?"(Editor's Note: Personally I believe that as long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.)

Submitted by John Hudson:

Rushing to work, I was driving too fast and as a result was pulled over by the highway patrol. The state trooper noticed that my shirt had the name of a local high school on it. "I teach math there," I explained. The trooper smiled, and said, "Okay, here's a problem. A teacher is speeding down the highway at 16 m.p.h. over the limit. At $12 for every mile, plus $40 court costs, plus the rise in her insurance, what's her total cost?" I replied, "Taking that total, subtracting the low salary I receive, multiplying by the number of kids who hate math, then adding to that the fact that none of us would be anywhere without teachers, I'd say zero." He handed me back my license. "Math was never my favorite subject," he admitted. "Please slow down."

Submitted by Skip Leonard:

A grade school teacher in Kentucky asked her students to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating." The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate, not fascinating". Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated." The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate." Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate", so she called on him. Johnny said, "My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight."

Submitted by Mary Fisher:

A mom was concerned about her kindergarten son walking to school. He didn't want his mother to walk with him. She wanted to give him the feeling that he had some independence but yet know that he was safe. So she had an idea of how to handle it. She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, if she would please follow him to school in the mornings, staying at a distance, so he probably wouldn't notice her. Mrs. Goodnest said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well, so she agreed. The next school day, Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week. As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, Timmy's little friend noticed the same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally he said to Timmy, "Have you noticed that lady following us to school all week? Do you know her?" Timmy nonchalantly replied, "Yeah, I know who she is." The friend said, "Well, who is she?" "That's just Shirley Goodnest," Timmy replied, "and her daughter Marcy." "Shirley Goodnest? Who the heck is she and why is she following us?" "Well," Timmy explained, "every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers, 'cuz she worries about me so much. And in the Psalm, it says, 'Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life'," so I guess I'll just have to get used to it!

Submitted by Gayle Quebedeaux:

The following were answers provided by 6th graders during a history test. Watch the spelling! Some of the best humor is in the misspelling. All present and former elementary school teachers will finally feel agreement for some the "answers" they've seen over the years...

Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert. The climate of the Sarah is such that all the inhabitants have to live elsewhere. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.

Solomon had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines.

The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth.

Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.

Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: "Tee hee, Brutus."

Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized by Bernard Shaw.

Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted "hurrah."

It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. Sir Francis Drake circumsized the world with a 100-foot clipper.

The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couple.

Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote.

The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.

Delegates from the original 13 states formed the Contented Congress.

Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backward and declared, "A horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.

Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves by signing the Emasculation Proclamation. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. They believe the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposingly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.

Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English. He was very large.

Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.

The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts and inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steamboat caused a network of rivers to spring up.

Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred men.

Louis Pasteur discovered a cure for rabbits.

Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Species.

Madman Curie discovered the radio.

The math teacher went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.

Funny Fact: By law, every child in Belgium must take harmonica lessons at primary school.

Have a great week and watch out for the school kids in the crosswalks,Al

(The video will bring back great memories about FighterTown USA in the '70s! Many will recognize some of the guys, Denny/Keith/Ho Chi/& others, in early Tomcats! Those were the days my friend, on yes those were the days!!

In April 2016 eleven USN, USAF, and USMC aircrew traveled to Hanoi, Vietnam, to meet with Vietnamese MIG pilots. This year they are visiting us in the United States.

Everyone is welcome to attend and meet with the MiG pilots, and other veterans who participated in aerial combat in the sky over Vietnam. Hear the stories as they relive their past engagements as adversaries, but now in the spirit of friendship.

There will be three panel discussions with US and VN aircrew discussing their engagement, experiences and feelings.

___________________________________________________________________

Contact for the 99 aircrew who had air engagements with the 11 attending MiG pilots:

Join us onboard for a very unique and memorable evening! Former U.S. and North Vietnam Aviators will meet face to face to reconcile in an emotional night of discussion, memories, and friendship. This once in a lifetime panel discussion will be one for the history books.

Admission to the event is free, but advanced ticket reservation will be required. Tickets are limited. Light snacks & cash bar will be available.

*To insure an accurate head count, we need to have your cash/check by 1500 at the close of panel discussions on Thursday 9/21/2017.Please pay Rick Hartnack in the conference room, OR *You may mail a check (by Sep. 15, 2017) to:Rick HartnackPOB 8000 PMB 8175Black Butte Ranch, OR 97759

1600-2200 Dinner on own /free time/prepare for departure/hospitality suite is open.

As best I can tell, almost all fake news sites (they prefer "satirical") target conservatives. I have not found one yet that plays on liberal sympathies to fool them into believing something outlandish; however, conservatives are either more gullible or there are more liberals that are creative enough to fool them.

The website thelastlineofdefense.org provides this disclaimer on the "About Us" page of the website:

DISCLAIMER: The Resistance may include information from sources that may or may not be reliable and facts that don't necessarily exist. All articles should be considered satirical and any and all quotes attributed to actual people complete and total baloney. Pictures that represent actual people should be considered altered and not in any way real.

(Note from me: before they put that Disclaimer on the page, the following was their Disclaimer: DISCLAIMER: America's Last Line of Defense is a satirical publication that uses the imagination of liberals to expose the extreme bigotry and hate and subsequent blind gullibility that festers in right-wing nutjobs. We present fiction as fact and our sources don't actually exist. Names that represent actual people and places are purely coincidental and all images should be considered altered and do not in any way depict reality.

Newslo/Politicops.com

The Newslo family of sites, which includes politicops.com and politicot.com, publishes what it calls "News/Satire." Newslo articles contain "show facts" and "hide facts" buttons. Generally, the "show facts" button highlights the first part of the story, which is often lifted from a reputable news outlet. The rest of the story is fabricated.

JUST ENOUGH NEWS… Newslo is the first hybrid News/Satire platform on the web. Readers come to us for a unique brand of entertainment and information that is enhanced by features like our fact-button, which allows readers to find what is fact and what is satire.

Newslo's "No Need to Satirize" brings you completely factual stories that are so ridiculous, they don't need our trademark touch. Whenever you see #NNTS, you're reading COMPLETELY real news that only seems too absurd to be true.

While Newslo articles are clearly labeled satirical, we have found that several other websites republish Newslo articles without labeling the stories as satire and without providing the hide/show facts buttons for readers. This is part of the problem with "fake news." Stories that are intended as satire circulate without proper labeling.

USPOLN or U.S. Political News

USPOLN, short for U.S. Political News, calls itself a "hybrid News/Satire platform." Its "About Us" page says its content "may include information from sources that may or may not be reliable and facts that don't necessarily exist" and "these articles should be considered satirical and any and all quotes attributed to actual people complete and total baloney."

Unfortunately, USPOLN, which can be found at uspoln.com, does not label its articles as satire. For example, we wrote that USPOLN picked up an article from politicops.com without labeling the article as satire and without providing the "show facts" and "hide facts" options given to readers on politicops.com.

Freedom Crossroads uses facts that don't exist and relies more on imagination than the truth. In fact, there is likely no truth at all in what you will read here. All of our articles are basically a crock of doody and should be considered satirical whimsies for today's aging conservative. All people, places, names and images should be considered fictitious or fictitious representations.

Conservative Nation

Consnation.com has a disclaimer that says: "All the information on this website is published in good faith and for general information purpose only. Conservative Nation does not make any warranties about the completeness, reliability, and accuracy of this information."

USA Politics Today

The website usapoliticstoday.com often lifts its content from other websites. The site contains a disclaimer at the bottom of each page that says, "USA Politics Today is not responsible for the content of external sites."

Clear Politics

The website clear-politics.com contains a disclaimer that says: "All the information on this website is published in good faith and for general information purpose only. www.clear-politics.com does not make any warranties about the completeness, reliability, and accuracy of this information."

This site should not to be confused with Real Clear Politics, a legitimate news site that can be found at realclearpolitics.com.

London Web News

Londonwebnews.com contains a disclaimer that says the site makes "no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, about the completeness, accuracy, reliability, suitability, or availability with respect to the website or the information, products, services or related graphics and images contained on the website for any purpose. Any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk."

The Postillon

The-postillon.com says on its FAQ page that "everything you can read here is satire and therefore all made-up. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental."

Teddy Stick

Teddystick.com does not contain a disclaimer, instead describing its content as "fact-driven articles that focus on issues that matter."

The Federalist Tribune

Federalisttribune.com contains a disclaimer that says it "does not make any warranties about the completeness, reliability, and accuracy of this information. Any action you take upon the information you find on this website (federalisttribune.com), is strictly at your own risk."

Empire News

Empirenews.net says it "is intended for entertainment purposes only." A disclaimer on the site states: "Our website and social media content uses only fictional names, except in cases of public figure and celebrity parody or satirization. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental."

USA Television

Usa-television.com does not contain a disclaimer. Fox-news24.com is an affiliate that also doesn't have a disclaimer. It should not be confused with Fox News, which can be found at foxnews.com.

The Rightists

Therightists.com contains a disclaimer that says: "This is HYBRID site of news and satire. part of our stories already happens, part, not yet. NOT all of our stories are true!"

American News

Anews-24.com does not have a disclaimer.

Washington Feed

Washingtonfeed.com does not contain a disclaimer on its site.

President 45 Donald Trump

President45donaldtrump.com contains a disclaimer on its site that says it "does not warrant" that "the information on this website is complete, true accurate or non-misleading."

Maine Republic Email Alert

Mainerepublicemailalert.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Viral Cords

Viralcords.com does not contain a disclaimer.

News Feed Hunter

A disclaimer on the website says: "NewsFeedHunter.com is a satirical publication that may sometimes appear to be telling the truth. We assure you that's not the case. We present fiction as fact and our sources don't actually exist. Names that represent actual people and places are purely coincidental and all images should be considered altered and do not in any way depict reality. All people, places, names, and images should be considered fictitious or fictitious representations."

Breaking Top

Breakingtop.world does not contain a disclaimer on its site.

enVolve

En-volve.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Guerrilla News

Guerillanews.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Daily Insider News

Dailyinsidernews.com does not contain a disclaimer.

The Political Tribune

Thepoliticaltribune.com does not contain a disclaimer.

USA Daily Post

Usadailypost.us does not contain a disclaimer.

American Fans

Americafans.com does not contain a disclaimer.

American Journal Review

Americanjournalreview.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Blue Vision Post

Bluevisionpost.com does not contain a disclaimer.

The Examiner

Theexaminer.site does not have a disclaimer. This should not be confused with the Washington Examiner, a legitimate news site that can be found at washingtonexaminer.com.

Patriot Hangout

Patriothangout.com does not have a disclaimer.

Your News Wire

Yournewswire.com does not contain a disclaimer.

St. George Gazette

Stgeorgegazette.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Power Daily

Powerdaily.us does not contain a disclaimer.

The Federalist Nation

Federalistnation.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Houston News

Houstonchronicle-tv.com does not contain a disclaimer. This website should not be confused with the Houston Chronicle, a legitimate news site that can be found at chron.com.

Daily USA Update

Dailyusaupdate.com does not contain a disclaimer.

USA Conservative

Usa-conservative.com, which is the same as theusaconservative.com, does not have a disclaimer.

Flash News Corner

Flashnewscorner.com does not have a disclaimer.

Conservative Army

Conservativearmy88.com does not have a disclaimer.

American Pride

Americanprides.com does not contain a disclaimer.

Stuppid

Stuppid.com does not contain a disclaimer.

The New York Evening

Thenewyorkevening.com has a disclaimer that says: "All the information on this website is published in good faith and for general information purpose only. TheNewYorkEvening does not make any warranties about the completeness, reliability and accuracy of this information. Any action you take upon the information you find on this website (TheNewYorkEvening), is strictly at your own risk."

Wazanews.tk

Wazanews.tk does not contain a disclaimer.

Ourlandofthefree.com

Ourlandofthefree.com has a disclaimer that says: "Ourlandofthefree.com makes no guarantee that anything you find here will be based at all in reality. All posts should be considered satirical and all images photoshopped to look like something they're not. It's not you, it's me."

Channel 23 News

Channel23News.com is a prank site that encourages readers to "Create A Story & Trick Your Friends!"

World-Politicus

World-politicus.com has a disclaimer that says: "All the information on this website is published in good faith and for general information purpose only. world-politicus.com does not make any warranties about the completeness, reliability and accuracy of this information. Any action you take upon the information you find on this website (world-politicus.com), is strictly at your own risk." Its terms and conditions say, "We do not ensure that the information on this website is correct."

Proud Patriots

The terms and conditions on wetheproudpatriots.com say: "By operating the Website, We the Proud Patriots does not represent or imply that it endorses the material there posted, or that it believes such material to be accurate, useful or non-harmful."

Snoopack

Snoopack.com does not have a disclaimer.

XBN-News

Xbn-news.com does not have a disclaimer.

World Politics Now

Worldpoliticsnow.com has disclaimer that says: "By operating the Website, World Politics Now does not represent or imply that it endorses the material there posted, or that it believes such material to be accurate, useful or non-harmful."

News Feed Observer

Newsfeedobserver is a satirical publication. It has a disclaimer that says: "NewsFeedObserver.com is a satirical publication that may sometimes appear to be telling the truth. We assure you that's not the case. We present fiction as fact and our sources don't actually exist."

As American as Apple Pie

On its "about us" page, Asamericanasapplepie.org has a disclaimer that says: "When no one can trust the lying fake news liberal media anymore because they hate us and guns and Harley Davidson and meat and OUR president, As American as Apple Pie is here to be your beacon of something you can kinda rely on sometimes but not really."

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