3.20.2006

whiplash

the first, i went to go and hear this guy speak about his experiences on robben island, where he was jailed for 25 fricking years with nelson mandela.

amazing speech, obviously, and i was especially moved when he said that the thing that made life the most empty was the lack of children. to be forced to not see or hold a child in 25 years is a form of emotional brutality he could not express. gulp... (shoot oprah-style to pasty white chick in audience who is discretely dabbing her eyes, and thinking "isn't anyone else blubbing here?" same white chick is also looking sidelong at the various preschool aged children seated quietly in the audience, and thinking "good grief. how do parents raise such well-behaved and culturally sophisticated toddlers?" and then, as kids begin to noisily act up, "i know it's wrong, but that makes me feel much better....")

the second [and if you are married to me, or have dined in my home, you perhaps might want to leave off here]: peeling carrots in the kitchen, solo, and realizing that the dog liked the peelings. after delicately scooping a few peels from the sink into her bowl, i proceed to grate the carrots directly on the kitchen floor with dog acting as canine-hoover. for some reason, it felt so wrong...Update: this just in via AIM:[13:05] love-of-my-life: you actually peeled carrots directly onto the floor?![13:06] me: uhm[13:06] me: no[13:06] me: i mean[13:06] me: yes[13:07] love-of-my-life: why not just start shitting on the lawn and calling it fertilizer?sigh... sometimes he just up and reminds me of why i married him all those years ago....