What if you had a baby and the government said it was illegal for your not to breastfeed that child? Well, in the United Arab Emirates that’s pretty much exactly what has happened and now women who don’t breastfeed can be sued by their husbands.

After a filibuster-length discussion over whether this idea was completely ridiculous, the Emirates Federal National Council decided that, in fact, it was not. Every kid has a right to breast milk, right? Even if his mother — you know, the person with the breasts everyone legislate around — isn’t so into the idea.

But what about the women who aren’t physically able to breastfeed? The Council will give them a wet nurse, though no one sounds sure about how to definitively identify which women can and can not nurse. So, if I wasn't so into breastfeeding I'd just claim "medical issue."

Ultimately this law is ... yeah, I’m just going to say what the hell is this law? I understand that breast milk is best for babies according to many researchers but removing choice from the conversation just seems counter-productive. Wouldn't that just spoil the milk? (see what I did there?)