IL drama causing anxiety

Hey girls, need to vent & appreciate anyone who reads this! Basically the situation is this – My direct inlaws are wonderful and I’m very lucky to have them. However, some more distant inlaws have caused some trouble for me in the past, and now I’m having serious anxiety about having to see them at the next family gathering.

IL I’m referring to was nothing but nice to me before the wedding & I always looked forward to seeing her. Two weeks after the wedding there was a family drama going on and she assumed that I started the whole thing. In reality I had no idea that any argument was going on and certainly did not have any involvement in it. The mr. & I only learned of the situation when she tried to start a FB war with me over it (this woman is 30+ years my senior). So, she told other family members untrue things, and basically the damage was done before I even knew what was going on. Luckily like I said, my ILs that I see all the time know this was BS.

My problem now is, I know this woman, for whatever reason, has it out for me. I generally just try to be cordial and keep it to small talk when dealing with people like her, but now there’s an upcoming event where I’ll be seeing her husband & other ILs who she keeps in touch with but we don’t really see, for the first time since the drama started. Other family members have similar issues with her, so this isn’t a new situation per se, but it’s new to me and I’m having severe anxiety over it. I don’t know what to do girls, every time I think of this family gathering I just get a huge knot in my stomach about it. I don’t know what she’s said to other people about me, and hate the idea of having defend my (lack of?) actions. Hellllp bees!

If most of your IL’s how problems with her or know that what she said was untrue you shouldn’t feel bad about it. I assume DH will be there to support you as well? She sounds real unclassy, but the most you can do is go, smile, and avoid her.

@megz06: Thanks for reading my ramblings : ) Yes DH will be there…there’s 5 ppl who know my side of things, 5 who don’t. Part of me wants to set things straight, but I know at this point it’s best to let it go. Ugh I just hate these situations! I will smile & avoid indeed.