Category Archives: Meta Blogging

Shortly after I launched this blog — and yes, “launch” is probably too grandiose there — I wrote a post criticizing some tone-deaf comments by Gwyneth Paltrow about the difficulties she faces as a tremendously wealthy parent. The post was picked up by Freshly Pressed, which generated the most traffic I have ever had to my tiny weird blog, and which gave me an overly optimistic outlook on the prospects for my tiny weird blog. (If anyone has written up a six-figure book deal offer for me, but is saving it in their Drafts folder because it feels “too forward” to send it, know that I have been eagerly awaiting your message every day for the last 15 months.)

Anyway, my point is that I kind of owe Gwyneth Paltrow one, for making me the blogging semi-success that I am today. And by “semi-success,” I mean “blogging has not yet caused bad things to happen in my life, at least not in a direct way that I can easily track.” Not, like, “my aspirational newsletter has expanded into a full-fledged lifestyle brand with an editorial headquarters located in a barn on my Los Angeles property.”

Also, let’s be real — there’s no pride in taking potshots at Gwyneth. The phrase that comes to mind is “low-hanging fruit,” unless you prefer “fish in a barrel,” or perhaps even the super-classy “target-rich environment.” Instead, I find it nobler to give Gwyneth credit where credit is due — not just for launching (oops, sorry, there’s that word again) my blogging hobby, but ALSO for these three other random things I came up with after hours of exhaustive, exhausting research.

Before we jump into today’s topic, I want to let you know that we are all in a safe place here. There’s no judgment — mostly because I don’t know you, otherwise I would be judging you SO HARD; but seriously, no judgment otherwise — and I accept whatever lifestyle choices you have made, or are thinking of making, or may yet make in the future.

That said, we need to talk. One of you apparently found your way to my blog via this NSFW search term:

“my teen friend i knew a long time ask me if i would fuck him in the ass”

Let that marinate for a second. I know I did! (There’s probably a “that’s what she said” opportunity somewhere in there.) (To say the least.) Continue reading →