I need some help.I've decided to make a video series as a project. It was to challenge myself and there are some excellent videos out there on the net and I wanted to contribute.Now this really is a challenge for me as I've never really done anything like this before. Hell I'm so shy when it comes to talking on a mic that it actually don't play that many multiplayer games with the mic because of it.The videos that i'll be making will be a deconstruction of particular favorite video games of mine, and I started with Bioshock.I've made a VERY rough cut of the first third of the video and the whole thing should run in at about 85 minutes long. I've still to work on a script, suss out how to sort out volume levels and my microphone. This really is a case of myself fumbling about in Sony Vegas to edit the interviews, still images, sound clips and gameplay together. Basically I'm a pathetic newb who is winging it.What I'm asking for is a bit of advise and constructive criticism on the video I'm making. If you could tell me the thing you liked or didn't and if anyone has any tips like how to record vocals that don't sound like I'm in a bloody cave then that would be brilliant!I know it's a big ask for you to take 30 minutes of your time for the criticism but it would be highly appreciated!

Last edited by Ord on Thu Aug 01, 2013 8:46 pm, edited 6 times in total.

I really enjoyed that. As someone who admires Bioshock (even inspired a few artworks) but having not really read up on it I look forward to the rest. I cant add a huge amount to how you achieve it though. But a few thoughts. Firstly, do not worry about your voice. In fact I'd go as far to say DAT ACCENT . I thought at the beginning it sounded great. Need a bit of practice and confidence but the voice is fine. In fact I would suggest it might need a bit more commentary. Understandably you want to keep some bits as clean as you can though. I dont know what your planning with the rest of it but are you going to show the other way of dealing with the little sisters?

On a visual level you could consider using a pad instead of a mouse for the longer sections. Its not really important I just find the camera movement makes it harder to follow. It could be because I'm not as used to it but it just doesnt feel natural. Just a small thought.

Ah! Thanks for the constructive criticism mate. Yes I plan to cover the other angle with the little sisters and that's a good point about the controller. The mouse and keyboard may be a great way to play a FPS, but it can be a little too fast when you are just watching it. Others have stated that there is too much gameplay with no commentary so I'll cut back on these sections a little and add more commentary. Like I said I've got to get a proper script going first as I'm simply rambling a bit in that edit. I'm also going to have to cut the lenghth as it may be too long. I don't wan to compromise too much though as I have a lot to say about the game so I reckon four 15 minute segments should hopefully work.

Pleased to help. I'll try and give it another watch later and see if I can think of anything else. I wouldnt worry too much about length yet. Better to have to much and then trim then never have enough to say. Write as much as can and then highlight the bits you want to say most. With Bioshock you could probably talk over an enitre playthrough though.

For the longer gameplay sections you could try explaining just why you feel they are good and describing how they made you feel/think when playing whilst they are happening. Maybe think about talking a bit more about what the score is doing at that point. Or the colour of the lighting. It might end up being too much but you might find it gives you a few extra points to keep if moving.

Your spot on about the first plasmid. You dont even get the "would you kindly" prompt. Watching it actually made me realise how games have slightly brainwashed us. The first kill. As gamers we know he is a baddie and whilst you have to kill him to survive it never seems like you give it a seconds thought. I'm blabbing now.

Sorry for the late response. I actually watched about half of it a few nights ago. I only really switched it off as I was so tired I wasn't even paying attention by that point.

I have to say I'm very, very impressed, Ord. I hate to think how much effort has gone into editing all that together and then recording over the top of it.

I'd kind of forgotten what a great game Bioshock is, and there are bits that I'd totally forgotten which you'd pointed out.

I thought maybe there were points where you let the scenes go on a bit. Like I don't think you needed to show the entire intro to the game. You could probably have started in the bathosphere station and just explained the whole plane crash bit. You'd still get a lot of the impact of Rapture.

I'll watch the rest when I get some time and post a few more thoughts. Really interested to see how this turns out. With a bit of polish I can see something like this being big.

Harry Bizzle wrote:Sorry for the late response. I actually watched about half of it a few nights ago. I only really switched it off as I was so tired I wasn't even paying attention by that point.

I have to say I'm very, very impressed, Ord. I hate to think how much effort has gone into editing all that together and then recording over the top of it.

I'd kind of forgotten what a great game Bioshock is, and there are bits that I'd totally forgotten which you'd pointed out.

I thought maybe there were points where you let the scenes go on a bit. Like I don't think you needed to show the entire intro to the game. You could probably have started in the bathosphere station and just explained the whole plane crash bit. You'd still get a lot of the impact of Rapture.

I'll watch the rest when I get some time and post a few more thoughts. Really interested to see how this turns out. With a bit of polish I can see something like this being big.

Thanks for watching!I've actually updated the video and more or less finished part one. I've listed to the criticisms about having too much core gameplay footage and cut back a bit. I've also added a bit more of my opinions of the game. This is part one so far -

I've still to really touch up the script, and tighten it up. I've almost finished part 2, which was a bugger, because I find Objectivism and Ayn Rand dull, but it had to be included. I've planned out part three and the finale of part four, but I've still to edit it. I'm actually enjoying doing this and i'm looking forward to the next game.

Brilliant. Loved your commentary over the plane crash. Brilliant. Shame to see a couple of the early bits go but when it said "end of part one" I said "that was quick!" out loud. So it certainly felt quicker. I'd up the volume of the gameplay sections a bit. Can you find a picture of the war poster you were reminded of? Might be worth including. I'm trying hard to think of anything but struggling as its looking so good. I actually just want to carry on watching so hurry up.

The Simpsons clip! Hmm. Tricky. I'm not sure what to say. Something didnt sit well with me. But I'm not sure what it was. Perhaps it was the defining Objectivism bit. I suppose your not helped by the fact she uses a million words. I'll think about it for longer.

However, I would include Dr. Steinman's rant though. UGLY! I think you need to give the attack on Atlas's family more room. Or at least a better transition into it. In part one you give his speech when your in the elevator time and this bit should feel like a pay off of that. I think the script at this point could help a bit more. It fits in well with what your talking about though. I think it needs to emphasise how important that moment is as until that point finding Atlas's family is the reason you have been progressing.

I cant think of anything else. It is still looking good though. Sorry if I've not helped much. I wish I could be clearer with what I mean! I'm really looking forward the next part as that is my fav to.

Haven't had time to watch it yet, but considering autopsies are done to find out how someone died, it suggests (to me, anyway) that you're looking at a game to see what went wrong, which doesn't really fit from what I've seen before.

au·top·sy[aw-top-see, aw-tuh p-] Show IPA noun, plural au·top·sies, verb, au·top·sied, au·top·sy·ing.noun1.inspection and dissection of a body after death, as for determination of the cause of death; postmortem examination.2.an analysis of something after it has been done or made.verb (used with object)3.to perform an autopsy on.

Ordtopsy -A crappy pun on my surname and it fits with the theme of the series i'm making.

au·top·sy[aw-top-see, aw-tuh p-] Show IPA noun, plural au·top·sies, verb, au·top·sied, au·top·sy·ing.noun1.inspection and dissection of a body after death, as for determination of the cause of death; postmortem examination.2.an analysis of something after it has been done or made.verb (used with object)3.to perform an autopsy on.

Ordtopsy -A crappy pun on my surname and it fits with the theme of the series i'm making.

Still seems odd to me. It's like when you say you're going to write a post mortem on something, it implies the thin has died/failed.