BEST OF 2012: Megan Fox In A Bikini Before She Got All Pregnant And, God, Woman, Why?!

Greetings, exalted one. Allow me to introduce myself. I am The Superficial Writer, Jedi Knight and friend to Captain Photo Boy Solo. (He withheld sex until I wrote that.) I know that you are powerful, mighty reader, and that your anger with us not posting must be equally powerful. As a token of my goodwill, I present to you a gift: These rehashed photo galleries from the past year. They have boobs in them. And sometimes butts.

FEBRUARY

These Megan Fox bikini pics were only up for the last week of February, yet they still managed to dominate every single post that month because despite the words that come out of her mouth, people still want to look at Megan Fox’s body and imagine having sex with it on top of a robot. Or in the case of Michael Bay, make her wash said robot while you teabag a cache of C-4. He’s a man of fine taste.

This twat needs to take a flying leap off the Empire State Building. “This is 40″ bombed. Her and Judd Apatow deserve each other. Howard Stern went on America’s Got Talent and did a stupendous job, and those untalented shitstains lost to a Tom Cruise movie in the box office. Hopefully she OD’s on her next fix or gets run over when playing out in traffic like the good retard she is.