The Eyes of my Epiphany

"What am I, your slave? Do I just waste my money on you for nothing?" Yes, nothing, that's what it looks like, doesn't it? Nothing.

You know, I was always the self-depricating type, always saying that I'm no one, that I'm worthless, I just never believed it. Maybe not until now. What have I done with my life? I wasted it on playing games, listening to music, and killing time.

It took the angry words of my father to help me realize that all I did amounted to nothing, that I truly was worthless. I was always complaining that I wanted to make a change, to work, to live a spontaneous adventure... yet the only thing that held me back was my own self.

How much time have I wasted on could have beens? How many times have I rejected the oppertunity to change? To become something?

I have only myself to blame for not being the person I wanted to be, the person people expected me to be. I forgot about the present while dreaming about the future, I lived in my own world and did what I wanted to do.

But really, is what I wanted what I really needed? I've disappointed so many, trying to act like an adult, all talk and no walk. All I proved was that I was a charlatan, worthless, my hideous achievement.

This was my wake-up call to reality. It's time for me to grow up and take responsibility, to prove to others... and to myself, that I'm far from nothing.

I've sat here watching my friends grow around me, becoming ever more like men and women. And all I've done was sit and watch, refusing to grow, clinging onto the last of my childish ways. I'm writing this letter to myself, and to all others. To show you the metamorphosis that teens endure, through my eyes.

This is my epiphany.

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