Who is the full fool?

When typing up words, I most often confuse the words “full” and “fool.” Though I know the difference in meaning of these two words and have no problem with their meanings, I seem to confuse them because they sound alike. Also, once I had eaten so much that I kept exclaiming, “I am so full.” My friend Tennessee proceeded to respond with: “Yeah, you are a fool.” By the way, I messed it up again.

I am indeed a fool. There is absolutely no doubt to this claim. I have made many, many mistakes and continue to do so against my better judgment. And though I know what’s best, I can’t quite place my finger on whether I lack the discipline, the motivation or something else to make better decisions. Therefore, I sometimes consider myself full of it. I am also a fool of it. “It” being all of the above. I am just trying to figure out how to promote the values and ideals that I want humanity to live by. I firmly believe that it has to start with me. As you read this, I guess I’m just asking you to be a little gracious and understand that I am human. Perhaps though, as you read this and as I write these entries, we can share in the experience of becoming wiser fools. Sharing is caring, people. Let’s make it happen.

I love movie quotes, but I’m not sure if Clementine from “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” gets it right when she says: “Too many guys think I’m a concept, or I complete them, or I’m gonna make them alive. But I’m just a fucked-up girl who’s lookin’ for my own peace of mind; don’t assign me yours.”

Maybe I don’t completely get the quote, but striving for peace of mind makes life (from here forth, I’d like to refer to “life” as “the journey) sound a little unpleasant. It is as if we’re constantly in a state of chaos, and we’re looking for a band-aid to this chaos or frantic state that will give us peace. The journey is a war-torn battlefield that finds periods of peace without it being everlasting.

I often ask people if they believe in such a thing as “world peace.” Most people say “no,” but what then are we striving for? Perhaps on a macro level, we’re striving. However, on the individual/personal level, I think we want to find a cure to end this condition of chaos. Though the journey should be difficult, it also must be hopeful.

Essentially, what I’m trying to say is that we need to seek ways of life that are sustainable to live. The way we wake up and go about our day, the way we treat people, the way we respond to how people treat us–these are all elements of the journey that require a careful approach. The journey changes dramatically when you want to greet the day with the excitement of what it has to offer. As I currently think about my future and wonder what it is that I want to do with my life, one qualification I made for that job and that future is that it needs to be something that I look forward to when I wake up. It needs to be something that has me jumping out of bed to be a part of. And the same goes with my family and everything else that is a part of my life.