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Bellum omnium contra omnes

I Have Things To Do

When I examine myself and my methods of thought I come to the conclusion that the gift of fantasy has meant more to me than my talent for absorbing positive knowledge.

Albert Einstein

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I have been, for the last few days, feeling like I am busting my ass, when in fact I have gotten almost nothing done. At first I didn’t even notice that I wasn’t getting anywhere, wasn’t doing anything. Last Wednesday was my wedding anniversary, and yes it was a very good day. My wife and I had a good day running around doing things, despite the first real hangover I’ve had since my bachelor party. We went out and walked around for a bit, did a number of things, including a going out for a very nice dinner.

Thursday was a day I had to myself. I signed up for unemployment again, looked around on hot jobs for work, cleaned some stuff up around the house, ran for the first time in a week and worked out for the first time in a few months. As a consequence Friday was filled with pain. I had soreness everywhere, but still managed to get a run in. I was going to work out as well, but soreness in my lats cut that short. No additional work around the house or online for work. Saturday I ran, went and picked up angel food, ask me about that if you want to know what it is, and my wife and I went out to the park for several hours. Again no substantive work done.

Today, after waking up and running, I went and got the laundry done, which took about 5 hours, much longer than normal, because there was a lot more wash to do this time. Still haven’t gotten to reworking the resume (which I am going to do after this article). Still haven’t gone to hit all the regular websites, like monster or career builder. Still haven’t made any of the phone calls I should have made.

And I think I know why.

I have been absolutely breaking my back for the last 3 months, and only had one day off in the last 17 before Wednesday. I believe what I’m doing now is called taking a breather. But while that explains a slowdown for a day or three, does not adequately explain why I’ve felt like I’ve been busting my ass. I mean I’ve been running regular after not doing that for a week, but beyond that there hasn’t been a lot going on.

Maybe I just want to feel like I’m busy so I don’t have to admit to myself that I’m out of work again. I hate not working, not being able to make enough with the sweat of my brow to pay all my bills and have a few bucks left over to enjoy, and maybe this is just some silly subconscious thing of mine to avoid the self loathing that goes along with being unemployed.

So, to avoid the self conscious pity bullshit and stupidity, I’m just gonna ignore it, keep moving, and get a job so I don’t have to worry about that damn weakness. I’m better than that, and I know it.

We all have a tendency to think that the world must conform to our prejudices. The opposite view involves some effort of thought, and most people would die sooner than think — in fact they do so.

Bertrand Russell

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A series of short comments on the news of the day:

I have the feeling that we will be hearing about the death of Sen. Robert Byrd sometime in the next 48 hours. Dunno why, and I hope I’m wrong, but that story just… i dunno … feels like that.

The news has been filled with stories of the nomination of Elana Kagan being a contentious one, like it’s gonna get vicious, and I don’t know about that. It’ll follow script. Republicans will hate and criticize, and democrats will posture like they are asking tough questions, while lobbing soft toss at her. Nothing surprising will come of this. She will in the end be a supreme court justice, after several days of “show” by both parties to make their case for and against. Nothing major as I can see. We’ll find out together. The show starts tomorrow, and I’m looking forward to catching at least some of it. Good political theatre if nothing else.

The g8/g20 summit has finished. A few hundred people were arrested, but that is par for the course. Saw a viddy on huffpo where a photog, in the middle of filming was beaten by a few cops. The way they went about their business I hadn’t seen before. A small group of police would rush forward, grab one person standing alone, seemingly at random, and drag them back into the throng on police, regardless of what they did. Now I know they had the usual anarchist nutjobs there, but in that viddy, this group of protesters weren’t doing anything but standing around. Moral of the story: Cops hunt in packs, if you’re a protester, form a pack yourself and you might keep your silly ass out of jail.

Scott Brown won’t vote for the financial reform bill. Just read that. Scott Brown wrote that press release and treated it like it was news. I knew that the second I put two thoughts together that he wouldn’t go for it.

Thought One; Scott Brown is a Republican. Thought two; The financial reform bill is a Democratic bill. Put those two together and what do you get? Scotty isn’t going for it. Sorry Scott, just an FYI for ya, it isn’t news if everyone knows BEFORE you put the press release out what it’s gonna say.

Hey! There’s a tropical storm headed for the gulf! Isn’t that fun! Let’s see if that oil spreads all the way out to Puerto Rico! Wooooohoooooo!