"Trust your doubts. If you have the guts to doubt God, and to question all the things you have been taught about Him, then you may find God for real." - Arturo, "Miracle in the Andes"

My Story

I am deeply interested in religion, politics, current events, history, musical theater and books! I left the LDS church a couple years ago and have spent a lot of time since then thinking and considering various religious influences in my life and in the lives of those around me. For more information on why I left the LDS church, look here. I also love to sing, act, dance (tap preferably) and perform on stage whenever possible.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

I Read History Books

There, I said it. Not only do I read them, I get excited about reading them...I can't wait until the end of the day when I can take 45 minutes to an hour and dive into all those delicious facts and dates, places and well, people. All this coming from a person who didn't even try taking the AP History test in high school because she just couldn't seem to remember all those dates and places and names! And honestly, not much has changed...I still find myself getting lost in the numerous dates and names but it is the stories...the stories of the people who lived through all these different times and places, those who lived through both the tragic and the mundane that so intrigue me. At at risk of sounding cliche, I will say it anyway...there is so much to learn from what has happened in the past!

I started reading "Massacre at Mountain Meadows" a few months ago but just couldn't get past the first chapter. Too many dates, names and places and not enough story. So early this week, I somewhat guiltily decided, "Hey this is my book, if I want to skip the first 100 pages, that is my right!" and quickly proceeded to the more captivating middle chapters. I have had my nose stuck in that book in every spare moment ever since.

It's a book about a tragic event that happened in Southern Utah in the late nineteenth century. It's tragic on so many levels...tragic for the poor folks that were so wrongfully deceived and ultimately massacred, tragic for the Indians who were put in the middle of the conflict and, later, fully blamed for the outcome and tragic for many of the those who did the deceiving and killing all in the name of following the orders of their religious and civic leaders.

To elaborate on the last point, the citizens of southern utah blindly followed their leaders without question to personal morals and what they may have personally thought was good and right. In the investigation following the massacre "one man after another said he had gone to the Meadows because of military orders". A military that was led by the religious leaders of the area. Nephi Johnson, an Indian interpreter, said that "A good many [men] objected, but they didn't dare say anything". They were told it was the right thing to do, and despite their misgivings, followed their leaders into "battle". The women left behind were instructed by Sister Haight (wife of Issac Haight who was a chief leader in the planning and execution of the massacre)

"the necessity of being obedient to their husbands" and not to be fearful in these "troublesome" and "squally" times". "We ought to attend to secret prayer in behalf of our husbands, sons, fathers, & brothers" and teach their children "the principles of righteousness, and to implant a desire in their hearts to avenge the blood of the prophets".

They were told it was the right thing to do, and in the name of obedience, the Mormons in the area followed the counsel of their leaders.

Additionally, this singular event in Utah history so clearly demonstrates the dangers of the us vs. them mentality. When a group of people separate themselves so fully from another group that they honestly believe they are better and more privileged, it is a recipe for disaster. As I think about it, I am reminded of a class I had in college. The teacher had everyone stand in a line as she listed off the many things that we judge people by (and by doing so, separate ourselves from them) and for each thing (sexual preferences, religious preferences, etc. etc.) the students in the class that fit the descriptions stepped across the room, becoming the "them". It was a truly eye opening experience as I realized that people I had put in the "them" category before, were really friends, acquaintances and classmates - people who up until that point I had considered to be just like me. How could the tragic events of the massacre have turned out differently if the Mormons in the southern Utah community had attempted to get to know the families in the Arkansas train headed for California instead of considering them "their common enemies"? Surely they would have realized how similar they really were and would never have felt "justified in distroying them."

Although this event occurred over century ago the key ideas that led to this disastrous event are still prevalent today. As a society and responsible citizens we must always listen to our conscience and fight for what we believe is right, even if it is unpopular. We must embrace and celebrate our differences, instead of condemning those that are not like us.