11 Very Strange – But True Wisconsin State Laws

We’ve all heard that “justice is blind.” But sometimes – it can also be pretty ridiculous. Wisconsin laws are no exception.

The most mysterious thing about strange laws like these, is that there had to be a reason why they were put into place once upon a time.

After reading these 11 Wisconsin state laws, you’ll probably find your imagination running a little wild. But at the very least, I hope we get a laugh outta ya.

We know some silly state laws are just legend. But as far as we know, the following laws are real statutes that came straight from the Wisconsin State Legislature. I even called and talked to a librarian at the Wisconsin State Law Library to ask for help confirming these laws.

I took out the ones she told me were nonsense right off the bat, but she never got back to me about the rest of the list.

Maybe they just didn’t have a sense of humor about it…

So if you think any of these Wisconsin laws are false – let us know in the comments.

1. It’s Illegal to Serve Margarine in Wisconsin

From 1925-1967 margarine was banned from sale in the state of Wisconsin. I guess Wisconsinites even tried smuggling it in, or making what they called “oleo runs” from Illinois. Thousands of Wisconsinites became fake-butter law breaking felons.

You criminals!

No joke. Wisconsin statute 98.17 has been in place since 1895 and it still stands today. It’s still illegal for restaurants to serve margarine – unless the customer specifically orders it. The “yellow stick from Satan himself,” as Governor Warren Knowles called it – is also a big no no in prisons, hospitals, schools or other state institutions – unless absolutely necessary for health reasons.

2. It’s Illegal Not to Give Livestock the Right-of-Way

One of WhooNEW’s Facebook fans made sure to point out that this law is not a dumb one. That it must have been a “cidiot” who put that on the list.

Well, the law might not be silly. But the people who decided to plow their vehicle straight through the poor roaming livestock sure are.

That’s really sweet though, Wisconsin. To give these poor animals legal protection from crazy drivers since 1957. Especially because they don’t even have too long before we gut them and eat them for dinner.

3. When Two Trains Meet, Neither Should Proceed Until the Other One Has

Did you read that twice? I had to…

I’m not really sure what would truly happen if a couple of railroad engineers actually decided to obey this one. It’s really quite hilarious when you think about it!

I bet it made for some delays on the railway.

Now…what about livestock on railroad tracks in Wisconsin? They do call those things on the front “cowcatchers” after all.

4. Businesses May Only Base Their Hours on Central Time

Here’s a good reason not to forget about Daylight Saving Time…

If you own a business in Wisconsin, your store hours better be advertised in the Central Time zone, or you could be fined $25-$500 and jailed for 10-30 days – according to Wisconsin statute 175.09. How could you confuse us like that?

Just think… there’s a valid reason behind every law…

5. It’s a Crime to Harass a Seeing-Eye-Dog in Wisconsin

What sort of bully would do such a thing? I can’t help but wonder the details behind this strange law.

You’d have to be a real jerk to mess with a dog helping a disabled person or leading a blind person. But I suppose there are plenty of jerks out there.

6. Wisconsin Cheese Must Be “Highly Pleasing”

I’m not kidding, if you look up Wisconsin’s cheese laws – and there are a lot of them – you’ll see. The law states that the cheese must be “highly pleasing.” (Source)

There are plenty more cheesy laws where that came from. Like, you have to have a master cheese-making license to make Limburger cheese. And, it’s illegal to make baby Swiss cheese without well-developed eyes.

9. It’s Illegal to Shoot Animals From an Airplane

Are we talking about birds here? I mean COME ON. Who in their right mind would go shooting at grounded animals anyway? Wouldn’t you be deathly afraid of accidentally taking out a few humans? OMG.

Although, it would certainly be an interesting twist when deer hunting season rolls around.

10. It’s Illegal to Blow Up a Muskrat House

You would literally have to go out of your way to break a law like this. Who on Earth put the Wisconsin State Legislature through the hassle of having to pass this law? Don’t you have better things to do?

And what about beaver dams? Can I legally stick some dynamite in a prairie dog hole?

Anyway – if you happen to be a muskrat – this is a great law.

11. It’s Illegal to Sell Colored Chicks, Ducklings or Rabbits

This must have been someone’s idea for a great way to celebrate Easter? Why else would someone dye these baby animals and sell them? Well folks – in Wisconsin – I guess we’re going to have to stick to decorating eggs.

Apparently, the rights of “unborn chicks” are still unprotected.

But speaking of chicks and ducklings – you may have heard that it’s against the law for our neighbors in Minnesota to cross the border into Wisconsin with a duck or chicken on their heads. Seems logical, right?

Turns out this one is another legend that was probably confused because of an old law dealing with a fabric called duck cloth. Read more from Minnesota Public Radio.

However, if you do catch a Minnesotan crossing state lines with any sort of feathered friend on their head – I don’t care if it’s a goose, a pigeon or a peacock – your civic duty as a Wisconsinite is to send them back where they came from.

Other Funny City Laws in Wisconsin

Sheboygan – It’s illegal to water your lawn in a way that annoys others.

Did you hear that grumpy old man next door who never turns his sprinkler off? You’re lucky this is Green Bay!

Racine – It’s illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.

But…but…what if there is a FIRE!?!

Racine – It’s illegal to shoot missiles at parade participants.

How about launching grenades? That’s cool, right?

Connorsville – It’s illegal to fire your gun while your female partner is having an orgasm.

Not sure if you’d do that to cover up her noisy moans of pleasure, or to celebrate finally finding the G-spot.

La Crosse – It’s illegal to worry a squirrel.

Squirrels are such worry-worts already. It drives me nuts!

La Crosse – It’s illegal to play Checkers in public, because it’s also illegal to say “king me.”

So then, if I were playing Checkers with a squirrel in a La Crosse public park, and he was worried I might win then…ah never mind.

Kenosha – It’s illegal for men to be in the state of arousal in public.

I don’t know if there is a police officer in Kenosha who has to check all the men’s pants. If there is – I hope he gets paid well.

Milwaukee – If you’re thought of as offensive looking, it’s illegal for you to be out in public during the day.

Ok, that’s just plain mean, Milwaukee.

Sun Prairie – It’s illegal to ride a bike without your hands on the handlebars.

Look Ma! I’m breaking the law!

Wauwatosa – If a person fails to return books to the library, that person shall return their library card to the library until the books are returned.

You’ll get my library card when you pry it out of my cold, dead fingers. Come and get me librarians!

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Wisconsin Reporter – Kevin Binversie is a Wisconsin native who has been blogging on the state’s political culture for more than eight years. He has served in the George W. Bush administration from 2007-2009, worked at the Heritage Foundation and has worked on numerous Wisconsin Republican campaigns in various capacities, most recently as research director for Ron Johnson for Senate.

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Yes, it is true about the “oleo runs” to Illinois. Folks would buy a case or two and split the ill gotten gains with family or friends. Sad to admit that my parents participated in this nefarious practice!!

my mother, 4 aunts and grandmother all went in together to buy oleo in menominee, mi. i used to ride along with mom ( she was the only one who could drive) on day on the way back to green bay,wi. we were just passing barkhausen reserve on county J when a county cop pulled mom over,,she was so pinickiy and scare,,we were load to the axel with oleo,, i kept saying calm down mom,, just calm down,,we got pulled over for a “soft” tire..then the cop askss where we were coming from,,and mom blurts out the store in menominee, mi where we bought a trunck of oleo..the cop looks and mom and says….HOW much is it there,,my wife goes all the way to Il. he wasnt aware you could get it in mi. now…..the law , if i remember right was passed because we are the diary state and the farmers felt that oleo was far cheaper that butter and that people would buy that instead,,of course, the farmers were right,,,you might say mom and i were the kenedys of the oleo biz,,,,

Actually Christ rose on the 1st day of the week, Sunday…It was the Pope in the 4th century that changed the Sabbath from Saturday to Sunday. And Wisconsin used to persecute 7th Day Adventist for working on Sunday as their Sabbath was on Saturday.

It is not for any of these reasons. Yes, private parties can sell cars on Sundays but dealerships cannot sell, they can service. It was created for silent auction days to allow people to be on a car lot and not be “harassed” by salespeople.

#9. I work at the local t.v. station in Rhinelander and our original transmitter tower was struck by an airplane in the late 60s. It is believed that the three men in the plane were hunting deer from their plane.

I am happy that I can tell my husband to stop telling people that it is required to serve cheese with apple pie. However, we know that it is or at least was illegal to sell margarine in WI. Our parents both drove to Michigan to buy it. The irony is that my parents owned a dairy farm and my mother made the most wonderful homemade butter! I think restaurants have to post a sign if they are using margarine instead of butter.

It was illegal to sell *colored* oleo in Wisconsin. You could buy white sticks of margarine with a packet of coloring enclosed — it was up to the buyer to mix it in herself.

A lot of people in Wisconsin found the white stuff unappetizing and the do-it-yourself color too much trouble, so they picked up a case of “colored oleo” at the border whenever they came back from Illinois or Minnesota. Technically, that was illegal, but I never heard of any prosecutions for this crime.

I work in a restaurant, and it is not illegal to serve margarine as long as it is mixed with butter. Most restaurants do that so the butter doesn’t melt on the line. So if you don’t like margarine ask for dry toast and butter cups on the side.

I wish the not swearing in front of women and children was an enforced law everywhere. I was once called an f—–g b—h in front of my 4 year old grandchild because I stopped on the shoulder to help a wounded animal. A gawker then caused a 2 car “traffic jam”.

Your microchip comment is both wrong and out of place. As a lawyer myself There is no mention of microchips in Obamacare anywhere. Sorry your to ignorant to actually look through and double check facts….

We are a “No fault divorce state”. According to my divorce attorney “the courts don’t care if your spouse is humping the entire cheerleading squad or if you’re doing the entire football team”. My cheating ex-husband was still entitled to 50 % of everything and was not even considered for any form of punishment by law.

#1 Yes, my folks had friends get margarine from Minnesota.
#2 If you have ever seen livestock hit with a vehicle you would understand this law. I have seen 4-5 cows hit by vehicle and laying in the middle of the road with one car on top of a cow.
#11 I remember my brothers and sisters and I getting color chicks when our folks brought us shoes for Easter several years.

I remember making the oleo runs when I was a kid, my dad would take orders at work and do a family trip to ILL, we would bring cases back of the nasty stuff. They even did road blocks on I94 around Kenosha to check cars and give out fines for smuggling it in, my dad would get off and take the back roads home so he wouldn’t get caught. LOL

In the plain states it’s common to shoot animals from a plane, and in some counties like mine the county actually hires people to do it (usually it’s just for coyotes, but that’s not always the case). You simply can’t do it as efficiently on foot as you can by plane. And for you city folk wondering why, coyotes can kill a lot of livestock, especially sheep and since they have no natural predators but a vastly abundant food source their population has to be controlled by humans.

In West Bend, if you dont return libary books you will be put in jail! Living proof right here! I checked 8 childrens books in the begining of July in 2011 and was arrested over Halloween weekend! Didnt even know i had a warrent. Sat 4 days and 3 nights in Washington County.

There is a law that to my knowledge is still on the books in Neillsville. A woman can only drive a vehicle at a very slow speed (coasting). Her husband must run alongside the vehicle with a red flag.

Back when I was a kid the DJs from WCCN use to read off a bunch of these crazy laws first thing in the morning. This is the only one I remember besides spitting on the sidewalk. Back then we thought that was a funny one. Now it makes more sense again.

One other one I heard many years ago was that oral sex is illegal in Wisconsin. I remember a priest ranting how this law needed to be enforced along with the law about living together (which may still be illegal too). That was back in 1980 or 1981 that he went on a rampage.

It was illegal to purchase COLORED oleo/margarine in Wisconsin, at least in the 1950s. You could, however, easily purchase the pale white oleo; this was NOT illegal. What Wisconsin stores COULD sell was the pale white oleo, packaged in plastic, with a dye package inside. A person would squeeze and break the dye package, then knead the bag of oleo to spread the yellow color around. You didn’t have to go to another state to get oleo; the anecdotes about “oleo runs” would have been for already yellow-dyed oleo, not the plain oleo with dye packets. You just bought it with the dye package inside, and this was perfectly legal, even in the Dairy State.

And no, it is not a law (anymore) that you MUST be served butter in restaurants, or that you MUST ask them or get butter as a default. Many places use margarine as a (supposed) health benefit, not butter.

Some laws may be still be “on the books”, but they have been rendered invalid by later laws. Alcohol was prohibited in the early twentieth century. This was later reversed. Still, the laws against alcohol are still in the books, as they were passed, but they do not have effect, as later laws changed their impact.

What is the melting temp. of margarine, and what,s the melting temp. of butter? Butter is about 90 degrees margarine is much higher so butter will stay liquid in the blood vessels margarine will plug every thing up (butter is better)
Clancy

Yes the margarine runs were a way of life. The cattle laws are to protect cows crossing the road at milking time. In Madison it was required for the law officer to hold and water your horse on the square if a hitching post wasn’t availble.

Pharmacists have to counsel patients on ALL medications, including refills. Why did this become a law? Because it sounded good to people who love to make laws and have never worked in a pharmacy. In reality, it’s unsafe because it causes constant distractions for the pharmacists, takes time away from patients who legitimately need the pharmacist, and conditions patients to view the pharmacist as a nuisance with nothing important to say. I’m glad to be back in Iowa again.

Merrill, WI, i have been told it is illegal to have a cheeseburger in your back pocket. I have also been told it is illegal to walk backwards down main street while eating a popsicle. I dont know how true these laws are, but they are defintly some for this article if proven to be true!

In Wisconsin law, there is a section on workplace safety. In that section there is an entry about hazardous materials in the workplace. Fine, right? The funny part is that lutefisk is specifically excluded from the definition of hazardous materials.