People think I have it against Halle Berry because I say she’s CRAY CRAY (ooops, I wasn’t supposed to call her that anymore–sowwee!). But I don’t have anything against her personally–she’s a beautiful and accomplished woman. My beef with her is how she’s handling the custody issue with ex and baby-daddy, Gabriel Aubrey. And now that I find out that this woman is really getting married to The Frenchman and wants to move to France, I’m gonna use my platform to advocate for poor Nahla, who’s in the middle of this tug of war and Halle’s attempt to completely erase the fact that she picked Gabriel, dated him for five years, and PLANNED A PREGNANCY WITH HIM. I brought this issue to the BB&W fan page, and predictably, women raced to Halle’s side, saying that she had every right to move to France, and if Gabriel didn’t like it, he could just move there too. Here’s what I said:

A child is entitled to involvement by BOTH parents. You know how many times I’ve wanted to move out of the state I’m in? Guess why I don’t? Yep–because Maxi-Me’s dad lives here and regardless of how crappy he might have treated ME, he ADORES his daughter and has every right to see her. I don’t want my daughter hating me because I kept her away from her dad. That is my obligation to my daughter as her mother. Get it?

And of course folks replied with blah, blah, blah, “We don’t know that whole story; shame on you Christelyn for being so judgmental!”

Understand this people. Halle has a well-documented health condition–Type 1 diabetes. Combine that with being over 40, trust and believe she had some medical input BEFORE she conceived, so this wasn’t an “Oops! Surprise! We’re pregnant!”

Ask me if I care if Gabriel was arsehole-y to her. Ask me if I care if he cheated. What’s that got to do with the price of tea in China? He loves his daughter, wants to be involved in her life, and has EVERY LEGAL RIGHT TO BE. It kills me how some women think that they just have the right to take their kids away from their fathers because they get mad at them. Life don’t work like that, boo boo. People need to stop confusing what THEY WANT with what their children NEED.

My pal Elizabeth Henderson summed it up beautifully:

Reading these comments reinforces to me why marriage in the US is in the dismal state itâ€™s in and why divorce and child custody proceedings are so ugly. People want things to be their way or the highway when relationships are about compromise. â€œI have money/fame/fortune/ donâ€™t get along with the other parent so I should be able to do whatever I want! He has his own money and a passport so why canâ€™t he follow me and move wherever I go?â€ What about the child? Itâ€™s so selfish! If you didnâ€™t want to have to answer to another person and live your life however you want than you should’ve taken the sperm bank route or, not have had children.

I’m not good in math, but the common denominator in all Halle’s failed relationships is…well…HER!!

I wish folks would think more about how this affects kids. If I’m on anyone’s side, it’s Nahla’s.

@Purple_Butterfly This is why I feel like that child is gonna be so screwed up. Divorce does a number on kids, ESPECIALLY an ugly one, and this one is not only ugly, it’s extremely public.

Patricia Kayden

Can she move to France and let the father see his child during the summers/holidays? I assume that people who are divorced and have children are capable of living in different countries and still see their children on a regular basis.

I don’t know what to say about this. I am sure that Halle and the “Baby Daddy” will work it out somehow.

MichelleDAlicea

I don’t see her moving to Europe as a big deal. After my parents divorced my mother moved across country and then we moved to Germany. I didn’t see my father often but what time we had was quality. I love both of my parents equally and I am glad to have had the opportunities to travel and learn different languages and cultures.

pick_a_name

Why are there always negative posts about Halle Berry and her decisions? Never any other famous black woman just her. Let the woman be. We dont know the whole story. For all we know Gabriel is okay with it and could get a house in France himself or she could stay with him summer/holidays. Since we dont know every detail, Im confused as to why these posts are made acting like its fact. Did she say she wanted her child to forget her daddy? My parents were divorced. Wish my mother wouldve moved our family to Europe. France seems like a nice place to grow up.

Nahla gets to go to France. Hmmmm. Nicer food, better schools, more uniform availability of quality medical care. Since French is the only REAL foreign language much admired in the USA, she’ll sound cool. Where’s the downside?

Hopefully Halle and Gabriel can come to a civil arrangement with regards to Nahla’s custody and visitation. Good or bad she chose him to be the father of her child. I am sure her current fiancee is aware of her predicament and responsibilities, and I wonder why he doesn’t opt to move here instead of her moving there.(I am torn on this one because after all it’s France!)Maybe being away from Hollywood will be good for her relationship since the rich and famous are known to blame scrutiny of their relationships from the media when things don’t work out. I hope Halle and her current fiancee do work out, but she must remember Nahla only has one father. (if not she will definitely be back)

Lili2009

The real issue is that the marriage will be short (if at all) so she’ll have to decide about staying in France or not once this relationship ends.

BrwnBeauty

hmmmm Lili…thought that same thing…think it’s just an EXCUSE to keep Nahla away from her father. She got what she wanted…a child..and now, he’s no longer useful…MY OPINION.

Yeppers…outside looking in…nodding at that too…dont’ know the whole story..YEP, that is correct as well…

shruggin’

For the childs sake..BOTH need to get a grip..and ACT like adults who care for their child, and not just what THEY want.

**drops her two cents on the floor and walks out**

Jamila

I’m a big Halle defender, but the woman is looking kookier and kookier to me by the minute. Halle has done all that she can to make Aubry mad at her and to intrude on his relationship with Nahla, from not allowing him access to Nahla without a nanny, to hauling this man in court every chance she gets.

People do have a right to move on and move out of state and the court will probably allow her to move Nahla. But I hope that Berry is forced to pay for regular visitation–for Aubry to fly back and forth and he wishes–and to cover all of Nahla’s travel expenses to go to CA to visit her Dad.

ann4950

@Jamila

That sounds fair. Other than her mother I think Halle needs a better support system. It’s a rarity to hear her mother say anything in reference to Halle. Maybe Halle is just like her mother.

As a sexist womanist bohemian, I am saddened to read that a BW who is a mother, calls another BW who is a mother “cray cray” …

Jamila

@DeeDeeRussell Motherhood is not a protective cloak that shields one from being criticized. I HOPE, for Nahla’s sake, that Halle is not being vindictive, but the more of these police and custody reports I read, it’s looking more and more to me like Halle is being evil to be evil.

@Jamila I am not privy to their personal life and this whole topic makes me uncomfortable as it seems like mental health shaming using high school jargon “cray cray”???? Bowing out towards the door. Stage left. Adios.

@Jamila I stepped back in to add this tasty quote picked up from FB on this very topic. “”I am seriously surprised at how Black women are attacking her and defending this trifling, abusive White boy. Yall take this “white men are better” stuff too far. I doubt if he were black there would be all this support of his ass. He is nothing and a nobody, controlling and trying to tie a woman down and control what she does and who she does it with.”

ITA…He’s getting the “white boy” pass as the “tragic mulatto” is demonized!

“…. holding up some rich white boy that wasnt even married to Halle that demands his black baby momma PAY HIM to babysit his own child; a rich white boy that wasn’t even married to Halle that demands his black baby momma PAY HIM alimony.. Alimony? No fool! And keep your hands to yourself and your tongue in your head.

“The LAPD is conducting a criminal battery and child endangerment investigation after Autry allegedly pushed the nanny with Nahla in her arms. And before the alleged pushing, the nanny says Gabriel screamed at her and hurled a racial epithet. In addition, weâ€™ve learned the L.A. County Dept. of Children and Family Services is also conducting a child endangerment investigation.

Itâ€™s also come to light what nanny Alliance Kamdem told polic. Law enforcement sources say Kamdem claims Autry repeatedly yelled and cursed at her, often while Nahla was present. Kamdem also says it got so bad that Gabriel would make her sit in a corner in his condo until he called for her. Kamdem also claims Gabriel often yelled at Nahla, causing the child to cower and cry.

And she told police that when Nahla had a rash, he refused to treat it. Kamdem quit last week after Autry allegedly shoved her.”

Christelyn

@DeeDeeRussell@Jamila I feel entitled to use the word. As someone who has their own struggles with mental health it’s really not a big deal for me. Me be for others but not for me. In this case, I’m not speaking directly of mental disease, I’m speaking of behaviors, and @DeeDeeRussell I know you know the difference between the two.

Courtney86

@DeeDeeRussell @Jamila

Well he was somebody enough for Halle to have a baby with him. If he was so terrible, why was she with him for so long, and planned to have a baby with him? If he is so abusive and everything, I am sure she knew about it before hand. 5 years don’t pass by without him exhibiting some sign of the behavior.

aceontopofkings

Halle and her child with be just fine no matter where she lives. Heidi Klum ex lives in Germany and no one said a word when she married Seal Pregnant and he adopted her child. I’m just saying. As a Bastard child, my Mother moved several states away from my sperm donor who didn’t want anything to do with me or my twin sister. But he did want to claim ONE of us on his tax return back in the day. My Mom didn’t ask for his permission when she moved, she just moved, since he wasn’t giving us a lick of support or cared about us.

Jamila

@aceontopofkings “Heidi Klum ex lives in Germany”

That’s because Heidi Klums’ ex has nothing to do with that little girl, hence the reason why Seal could adopt her.

zabeth

@Jamila@aceontopofkings The father of Heidi’s oldest daughter is not her ex-husband but an Italian auto-racing financier that she had a relationship with. But as Jamilla pointed out he has nothing to do with the child. It’s a different situation when the father actually wants to be involved in his child’s life- especially considering how many don’t.

Darknlovely12

@zabeth @Jamila @aceontopofkings

This is the same Italian who dated Naomi Campbell and bought her a large yacht.

I hope what’s called “Parental Alienation” isn’t occurring. Either way, this will come out as Nahla is probably a little too young to verbalize what’s going on. Going to post some links for reference as there are signs…Hopefully this will help someone:PAS Attorneyhttp://pasattorney.com/pas-faqs.htm…

First of all the french actor is not her fiancee, he is just a short lived boyfriend. They meet on a movie shoot, just like she meet Gabriel on a photo shoot. Halle has had many bad relationships. How long can you play the victim before people start to wonder. Halle has some DBRish traits about herself. During her whole acting career she as always be attached to a man. She needs to spend time by herself to learn why she is always attracting so-called flawed men.You’ll know that she had her nanny just a few weeks ago claim the Gabriel attacked her. She tried to have him thrown in jail. Because there was no bruises or eyewitnesses the judge didn’t fall for the allegation. She loses that battle and now she wants to move out of the country. Do you know that Halle recently twitted pictures of her daughter kissing the french boyfriend in the mouth at the beach and her daughter has no shirt on. God don’t like ugly and if she keeps up with this nonsense something bad will happen to her daughter in her presense and she may lose full custody all together. What is going to happen when the french boyfriend cheats on her. His she going to accuse him of abusing her daughter. Heck he might just be the one to throw her under the bus. She is so sad. She’s suppose to be in love, she has a beautiful and healthy daughter whose father adores her, so why is she so bitter and unhappy. And where is her bff Oprah. She’s been quiet and we know Oprah don’t tolerate abuse of children. I use to be Halles’ biggest fan, but not anymore. For those who say that people don’t know the whole story, that is true but Halle has said that Gabriel was the best man and father ever until he broke up with her because she said that he was not long attracted to her and that he wanted to date other women. Now that her ego is bruised he’s the worst father of the year. I don’t think so. Even though she is the famous rich one in the case, she keeps losing. Not a good look Halle.

VintageNarcissa

I do think Halle, as Nahla’s main caretaker has the right to take her wherever she wants. She does not however, have the right to keep her from her father, especially if her father wants to be involved. Children do not have a say in whether their parents stay together, however, they do, more so than the mother or father’s rights, have a right to have two parents as willing participants in their lives. Not having a father around is bad enough without knowing that your father wanted to be there and wasn’t able to. I feel that destroys children even more. I really hope they can work something out for Nahla’s sake.

Darknlovely12

I know that everyone is entitled to their own opinion but black women just have no problem at all just calling each other out all…the…time…damn. No other group of women does it sooooo much to each other. And I know already, it is your perrogative as the blog owner…

pick_a_name

@Darknlovely12

Yes black women have got that bad calling eachother out like we are all blood relatives and a black womans specific business has to be every other black womans business as well. Its also really funny to me how everyone is saying he is a good father when no one here has spent time with any of them. Im not saying he’s not a good father but how is everyone experts on someone else’s life just based on what you read in the media? I think sexism also is playing a part in this although most may not be consciously aware of it. Folks are quick to side with the man especially if he’s good looking.

Christelyn

@pick_a_name @Darknlovely12 If you think that black women should defend each other’s foolishness no matter what, you’re in the wrong place. We tell the truth here. Straight; no chaser.

Courtney86

@Christelyn @pick_a_name @Darknlovely12
Totally agree. That’s why there are so many baby’s mamas in the black community. Because nobody says anything about it, so many young girls think it is cute or okay. And if someone wants to say something about it, it’s called “getting in their business”. My friend in high school got pregnant senior year, and I told her how I felt. I was not going to sugar coat it.

pick_a_name

@Christelyn @Darknlovely12 I dont think anyone thinks black women should defend eachothers foolishness but to call eachother out for everything when they dont even know the black woman nor do they know the specific situation, No I dont agree with that one. No I dont think the truth is always told here. You tell the truth as you see it nothing more nothing less. Christelyn since your an expert on Halle Berry, should I assume you know more about the situation than we all do? Because otherwise it looks like gossip. Just look at the headline, Halle wants Nahla to forget her daddy. How do you know thats Halle’s intention?

Thats the problem with BWE blogs. I certainly agree with the premise but some of these blog owners act as if every black woman has to live their life the way they see fit. People are always so judgmental of Halle and I dont think black women have to make excuses for her but to go out of their way to character assisinate someone when they dont even actually know the full situation is just sad to me. I understand she’s a celebrity and celebrity’s put themselves out there but Ive never been one to care for the gossip. I think its morally wrong celebrity or not.

Jamila

@pick_a_name@Christelyn @Darknlovely12 Oh cry me a river. All of these court documents have been posted up on TMZ and half a dozen other sites in their entirety. We are just commenting about what has actually been put in the public view and can be proven; therefore, we have every right to comment on it.

Christelyn

@Jamila @pick_a_name @Darknlovely12 Is it just me but do you find the defensiveness on Halle’s team disturbing? Does anyone CARE what’s best for kids anymore?

Jamila

@Christelyn @pick_a_name @Darknlovely12 Chris, I have a post in the works about this reaction. I tell ya, people and their mood swings are the best source of cannon fodder.

reem11

@pick_a_name @Christelyn @Darknlovely12 I have a question for you. Does a black women have to looks similiar to Halle for you to be concerned. There was a topic on Fantasia then Halle in the past and I was very suprise that no one came to her, Fantasia’s defense like you are doing with Halle. Wrong is wrong. You are having trouble understanding why the white guy. I do not know the situation myself. But have not heard the babies father is unfit are violent,etc. Too many children need their fathers. Too many BW (women period) need fathers in their childrens lives and the fathers are not there. If the WM (no he is not black and is very attractive) loves and wants his daughter in his life. Why not? Lets stop the strife and bickering and be careful to know when to be concerned. Lets not slander one another. I’m I seeing the said steroetypes of BW being played out here? Do we even care? Ladies we got to be wise.

Jamila

@pick_a_name @Darknlovely12 I’m not saying he’s a good father. I’m saying that in all these reports Halle and her nanny were filing, there was never any indication that Aubry hit or acted physically aggressive towards his little girl. Yet, Halle demanded that he not be able to see Nahla without a nanny–a nanny that she chose–from the very beginning. This same nanny had the nerve–according to Aubry–had the audacity to show up at Aubry house and have an attitude with him for not telling her that he had gone to pick up his daughter from school. Now what type of mess is that when the nanny thinks she has the authority to tell the father of the child what to do?

Halle chose to have a child with this man and it is not fair to him to provoke a reaction out of him just to be spiteful.

Fefe32

@Jamila

I’ve been a nanny before. That whole not letting the nanny know that you are going to pick up the child thing is not cool at all. It happened to me several times as a nanny. Here I was waiting at the school bus stop looking for the child, loosing my mind, and the whole time he was with his mom. She never bothered to tell me that she’d picked him up early from school. So I was out there waiting out in the cold and worrying for no reason. I wanted to curse the mom out, but I didn’t. This type of thing happened with that family more than once. It make me mad just thinking about it. It such a self-centered and thoughtless thing to do.

Jamila

@Fefe32 There has definitely been some passive-aggressive behavior going on on the part of Aubry too. You’re right: If you KNOW that the nanny is being sent to the school to pick up the child, why wouldn’t you just call the nanny and tell her to not go to the school?

There’s a lot of pettiness coming from both sides.

reem11

I hope Halle is not being difficult here. If the father (I am assuming he is a good one) wants to be in his daughters life then Halle should allow him this right. It will be fair for dad and daughter.

SirLoinDeBeef

Just speaking on a personal note, I’ve seen it from the opposite perspective – nasty divorce, the works, plus parental alienation, starting from before the separation and divorce – for every $1 I paid, my ex- paid $9 + gifts of cars, etc. – young-people gleefully took the $$.

Now, my only contact is “in case of emergency … break glass … pull lever … call Dad … activate money pump,” – except that I don’t do that anymore, which has resulted in the Great Black Hole of Non-Communication..

The alienation extended to grandchildren, now pre-teens, with whom I have no contact at all at this time.

@SirLoinDeBeef I can so relate to some of this, except my husband passed away and the nastiness was over the settlement of his will. Ugh. Some kids can be BEASTS. IJSI digress. I know we’ve had a post on “Would you date a man with kids,” but I think a post on step-parenting would be in order. Goodness knows I could write a book on the subject – and I just might.

Joyce345

@ASwirlGirl @SirLoinDeBeef

That reminds me of a saying we have in Africa. I’ll just give you the rough translation.

Piss off a child and he will be mad at you for one hour. Piss off his mother??? He will be mad at you FOREVER.

ASwirlGirl

@SirLoinDeBeef Somehow the spacing didn’t come out correctly.

Should be, Some kids can be BEASTS. IJS

I digress. . . . . . . .

Christelyn

For those who think I’m giving Gabriel a “white boy” pass, uh…have you been around for the past two years? I give NO ONE a pass. Tragic mullatto my arse. I don’t care if Halle were blue-black, I’d be saying the same thing. You know what funny though? When I called out Fantasia for her foolishness, NONE A YA’LL came to her defense! Now who’s favoring whom?

Courtney86

@Christelyn
I agree. I think it is unfair what Halle is doing. Yeah, Gabriel is a jerk, but he is Nahla’s father. And to expect him to pick up his life and move to France just because she wants to is ridiculous. I hate it when mothers use their children as tools of revenge against the father. Believe me, I know because my mom did the same thing. I’m 25, and haven’t seen my Dad since I was 4. But the situation is really complicated, and personal, so I’m not going to go into further details. But the point is, no matter if the person is black, white, ect, doing what Halle is doing is unfair.

pick_a_name

Courtney86, How do you know what she’s doing is unfair when you dont even know the reason why she is moving to France nor do you know how good of a dad Gabriel is or isnt. I think folks need to realize we dont actually know any of these celebrity’s. Even when their drama makes the news, we only get a portion of the truth. Even with celebrities Im not too fond of like Kim Kardashian, I never jump on the bandwagon to give my two cents about their relationships. I think gossip is ugly and pointless.

Courtney86

@pick_a_name
I don’t like gossip either, but I happened to read this article and wanted to say how I felt about it.

reem11

@Christelyn This is sadly true. It is almost as if she were a nobody. Not one to be placed on a pedestal by the bc.

I really don’t know what to say about this situation because I don’t know what’s going on. Is this a move for the safety and wellbeing of mother and child, or is Halle doing this to spite the father and add further ugliness to the situation? Some divorces can get OOOOOGLY, and it’s not above some people to use children to get at their exes. It’s one of those situations where everything leading up to this validates both sides. Her accusations, accusations by the nanny, etc. could justify a feeling to move abroad with the child, claiming a need to ensure the child escape a deranged father. Or to conspiracy theorists, these actions could have been laying the groundwork for what she wanted to do all along.

The ONLY thing I know is that this child is probably going to need all sorts of therapy.

According to the link above, Halle wants to leave due to fear for her and Nahla’s safety after receiving death threats from a stalker.

I will admit that the timing of this decision does look suspect considering Halle was ordered (just last week) by a judge to attend mandatory co-parenting classes with her ex. However, at the end of the day what goes on in the lives of Halle and Gabriel have absolutely ZERO-bearing on me and mine; therefore, I really don’t give a hoot.

I think that some interesting accusations have been made, not just here, but in other articles, about how some BW are treated or should be regarded.

Women who have committed acts of infidelity tend to be more despised than those who have screwed up in other ways or have revealed other sorts of damaged behavior. It could also be argued that some women are more likely to be attacked based on age, wealth, class, and even skin tone. OR these women could be made sympathetic for these reasons.

To be honest, I don’t know what to say about Aubrey because I’m not familiar with his romantic history prior to Berry. That could be why there is decidedly less focus on him: He’s less famous, his relationship statuses are less known, and he does not have the very public failed track record of his spouse. I’m actually going to say for the record that any hostility she is getting is a result of her own PR back-firing. Make no mistake, when a intimate details and rumors find their way into the press, it’s not necessarily because these people don’t know it’s happening (think Alec Baldwin’s message winding up in the news). Just because a divorce is ugly does not mean it is obligated to be public. One side is seeing much more information put into the press than the other. I don’t think it’s an accident. I think it’s happening with the intent of making the move easier from both a PR point of view, and child custody point of view. If she’s determined to move with her child and she hates her ex, she sees no reason not to fight dirty to get what she wants. She’s not the first person to go there. I think the problem she’s having is that, like I said, his previous relationships aren’t as well known, and people don’t follow him as much as they do her. She’s the more known one, the one with the very public relationship problems. If that weren’t the case, people would be less likely to suspect anything strange. Which would make all of this a shame if there is validity to what she’s saying. It’s also why I wish some celebrities would understand that a public marriage is a very bad idea, especially if things go off the rails.

I do not blame her for wanting to move away from a potential stalker, and if that’s the reason she wants to do it, it’s certainly understandable. Unfortunately, when there is a child in the middle of things, it gets complicated. I’d like to believe she’s doing this for the safety of herself and her child. Only time will tell (and it will) if ulterior motives are involved.

oekmama

@Toni_M I think Halle Berry is just a regular woman and shouldn’t be put on a pedestal – she’s just trying to figure life and love out, like the rest of us. This may be why people are so harsh in their critique of her and other celebrities.

Maybe when she gets some time away, she’ll cool down and allow the ex to fly over and see the child.

ann4950

I totally agree with Chris. My family member is in a similar position. I am related to the guy. His ex. doesn’t want her newborn to have anything to do with her father. She is 34 and he is 28. They both work in law enforcement. He says the child was planned and he wanted to marry her. They moved into together after they learned about the baby. Her family knew about her moving in with him and the baby. His mother knew these things after the fact. He probably did not tell his mother about moving in and the baby because he knew his mother would have not approved. IMO, he gave her to much control in the relationship. We knew something was amiss when his calls to his mother became very infrequent, he behaved as if he did not want to be bothered with her. He had this impression that her family was somehow a little better. Why? Her parents are still married and they raised her and her siblings in another adjacent city. His ex is smart and has a alpha type personality. Although, she seems a bit insecure about herself. She looks rather old for her age. Whereas my relative is still quite good looking. He gave her money for herself. She used his credit card without permission and now refuses to repay him. He can be fussy but, he is not a thug by any means. I think she would be happier if he was more a rough neck type of guy. All in all she was a little to advance for him. He is talking about going to court so that he can have visitation rights, how many bm are willing to fight for visitation rights?

Both sides have handle their situation rather poorly. This is why marriage first and then have your baby.

Anne55

I agree with Chris.

Halle says she wants to leave for safety issues but when she was getting death threats when she was pregnant and after she gave birth, she stayed put, got bodyguards, and all was well. Most people don’t know this because back then she kept her business to herself. Now that she hates Gabriel all we hear are negative things about him as a man and as a father. A woman in her position has the power to keep this kind of nasty business under wraps. Many stars do. I’ve made a nice living helping them. The fact that we hear so much one-sided information that favors the rich Hollywood elite should tell you something. If you’re not convinced, Google the conveniently staged photos of Halle letting her daughter kiss her new boyfriend on the mouth like he’s her daughter’s father.

Halle plays dirty. I wish she’d put her ego aside and think about what would be in her daughter’s best interests.

@Anne55 This is EXACTLY what I was saying in my comment. I know that PR is responsible for helping this sort of info stay under wraps OR leak harmful information about the other person if that’s what the divorcing ex wants. And because so much of what’s happening is one-sided. it makes that look more and more the likely scenario.

She really should have kept this information out of the press, ESPECIALLY if she intends to have a relationship with anyone else in the industry or who is famous. People aren’t stupid. If you feel comfortable leaking damaging information and accusations should things go badly, especially if it becomes clear you’re doing it for ulterior and arguably selfish reasons (sole custody of the offspring and blocking the father’s access), that’s going to be at the back of the mind of anyone who you are interested in the future. For the sake of brand and name protection, they may avoid a serious relationship. It also does her absolutely no favors if things go badly again because of so much public knowledge of previous bad relationships.

I really just wish celebs wouldn’t play these games in the press and keep it all to themselves. Not only for the sake of their kids, but because unless they’re the “teflon” sort of celebrity where none of their foul behavior ruins their careers (something I’ll go on record rn as saying is pretty exclusive to men, especially those with connections), it’s not a risk worth taking.

Bellydancer

I do think Gabriel was in it for the money and feels that now that Halle has moved on to someone else his access to Halle’s money will be lost. Although he seems to love his lill girl I keep thinking this guy is K-Fed part 2. If Halle marries again and her husband’s primary residence is in France there is nothing stopping Gabriel from getting his broke ass on a plane at Halle’s expense of course and modeling in europe somewhere. See this is why you adopt alone or go to a sperm bank and be done with it.

NijaG

@Bellydancer

Which money? They were never married, just lived together, so it’s not like she owes him alimony. I don’t follow their story that deeply, so the only thing in terms of money I can think about is if he wants child support from her.

For those who have read some of the legal papers floating around, is that the case?

I don’t remember ever hearing that he stopped trying to work when he and Halle were still together. He may not have been on her level financially (which she knew when she entered into the rlsp), but he wasn’t hurting either.

I don’t know what happened btw them, but Halle isn’t some innocent victim. She has more power and clout than he does and she’s using it to get what she want, regardless of the potential negative consequences.

What I learn from following this, is that people have two yardsticks: How they judge themselves and people like themselves and one how they judge VIPs.

If I take the yardstick that I use to judge myself: Once you have a child, you are no longer free as a bird. Each child has the right to know both sides of the family, or s/he will hold it against you when they are old enough to realize what you did. Plus the fact that the ex should help financially with the baby he helped make. That trumps my natural instinct to get my tender broken heart as far away from the evidence of my failed relationship as possible.

That’s the yardstick that I would use to judge if I were in those shoes.

The fact that Ms. Berry has money, means that she doesn’t need financial support. But it doesn’t mean that she should deprive her baby of the real daddy.

So much for rights of the child or rights of the father. Ms. Berry is upholding her rights as a woman as the only rights worth having.

cns

First of all people are saying that divorces nasty. They were never married. This custody issue point blank. I hate when people undermine the sanctity of marriage by referring to couples that shack up as married. There cannot be a divorce if people were never married. I’ve heard bloggers refer to Gabriel has a jerk but there has never been a person who has had a personal relationship or contact with him has said that. Not even his ex- girlfriends. The media has dug in his background and they cannot find any dirt on him. He may have a temper, but could she be the reason for his temper. All of the men that Halle has dated in the last 20 years have said that she is crazy and has warned other men not to date her. One of the guys was a Spanish actor and the other was a White guy and a member of a boy band. We only know of the bad relationships she has had with the black men she has dated and married, but the non-black men she has dated have all said the same thing. She is crazy. If you are going to compare people based on failed relationships then Halle loses all around. Word on the street (Hollyweird) is that Halle is un-dateable and that is why she is now dating internationally. No man in the US, now Canada and soon France will ever date her seriously. LOL. Btw, I used to be her biggest fan. Halle do better.

@cns You’re right. No idea WHY I feel like they were married. Maybe because the break-up has all the signs of an ugly divorce?

ELLE ROCHELLE

I hope Halle really thinks this through for the sake of her childs relationship to Gabriel. The early developing years are so important between a child and father and once those years are gone you cannot get them back. I met my dad for the first time when I was 18 I tried getting closer to him but after some time he decided he no longer wanted to a dad to me so the relationship never went any further. Sometimes I think what would it have been like to have a dad in my life to do all the wonderful father and daughter things together.

It’s too bad Halle keeps chasing one carrot after another for her happiness.

Islandgirl

Personally I believe that the biggest loser in this whole sorry tale is Nahla with Halle not too far behind. This entire drama started when Aubry was photographed at a basketball game with Kim Kardashian and the consequent proven to be false rumour that Aubry and Kim were an item. Halle’s comments about a firm believer in the ‘one drop rule’, allegations that Aubry is racist and Halle’s insistence that Aubry drop everything to be at her every beck and call. These factors have resulted as others have noticed that from a PR point of view Halle is over the tipping point as unlikeable based from the commentary from other news sites I’ve read.

Monique8

Since none of us really know why she wishes to get engaged and move to France everything that is said here is simply specualtive and conjecture. If she is really moving because of threats she’s received from a stalker then that should be a consideration, if she is moving because she is playing dirty in her custody battle with her ex only time well bear that out. I think Halle needs to take a minute and work out why she constatnly finds herself in bad relationsips. Perhaps she is doing that, I don’t know. I wish her well and I hope her intentions are honorable in wanting move. Other than that I’ll reserve judgement until all the facts are in, not just the things WE THINK are facts.

ForestElfQueen

team nahla!

i think france would be great for her.

Kels

I can’t with Halle. I really can’t. I used to be a fan but she has just been so off the wall that I can’t defend her.

Why didn’t she just call it a day and get a sperm donor? Or adopt? I think she’s wrong to take the child to Europe when the girl has a real meaningful relationship with her father. It’s just plain old wrong and Halle’s a spiteful nut job.

friendswmimi

I totally agree with you, Christelyn. I’ve never kept my daughter away from her dad, even though he and don’t get along. I didn’t want my daughter to have a messed up relationship with her dad on my account. It’s not fair to anyone. When you have children, you really, really need to think long and hard about who you’re going to sleep with before you get pregnant. You and your child’s father have many, many long years together, whether you like it or not.

“Gabriel Aubry is being watched … watched by a monitor whenever he’s with Nahla … ’cause a judge ruled he can’t be trusted with the child alone, at least for now.

TMZ broke the story … Halle Berry’s baby daddy was ordered into Dependency Court today after the L.A. Department of Children and Family Services concluded its investigation. As we reported, DCFS not only looked at an incident in which Gabriel allegedly pushed a nanny while she was holding Nahla, but other incidents as well. We’re told DCFS had information that Gabriel had yanked the baby from the nanny’s arms on at least one occasion and screamed at Nahla multiple times.

********We’re told DCFS had extensive information that it had reviewed and then recommended a monitor for Gabriel when he has Nahla. We’re told .. the judge agreed this morning and put the monitor in place after a hearing.************

Karla00

@DeeDeeRussell There’s something about this guy and I can’t put my finger on it. I’m glad that they recommended a Monitor, children first always!

Halle has her issues yes, but its obvious that this Gabriel dude is no angel. The sad part is that their daughter will grow up with all of this baggage on her shoulders.

iHeartLove

Halle is just a regular woman who happens to have a spotlight on her. She has no more answers than some random chick walking down the street. She’s trying to figure her life out and admittedly having a hard time.

I don’t like just calling her crazy or saying the common denominator in all her failed relationships is her…the common denominator in every person’s failed relationships is inevitably themselves since he or she was the only one who went through all those failed relationships.

Whatever Halle’s going through is ugly, but it’s not special like she’s more messed up than other women out there who have children from broken relationships/marriages. And for the record I don’t agree with whatever messed up thing she has going on about keeping her child from her father. I do think though how she and Gabriel Aubrey ultimately end up raising their child is their business. They aren’t abusing the kid or anything illegal like that so it’s up to them, their respective families and I guess the courts to figure it out. Halle chose to have a baby with Gabriel Aubrey, but Gabriel Aubrey chose to have a baby with Halle Berry too. Nobody forced him to be with her and now they have a child and have no choice, but to figure this out together.

It may sound harsh, but Nahla doesn’t strike me as a child who we need to be concerned about because her parents can’t do what’s right for her. Admittedly I’m kinda feeling harsh tonight, but I don’t see how Nahla needs us, the general public, to be her specific advocate… In what respect? Is she the first child in Hollywood to grow up in a broken home? I mean, otherwise almost nobody in the entertainment business could have kids. They are all messed up!

That being said…”Ask me if I care if Gabriel was arsehole-y to her. Ask me if I care if he cheated. Whatâ€™s that got to do with the price of tea in China? He loves his daughter, wants to be involved in her life, and has EVERY LEGAL RIGHT TO BE.”

I agree with this statement (that Father’s have the right to be with their children and Mother’s do not have the right to take children away because they are mad), but as a separate issue from custody, how a man treated/treats the mother of his child does matter, and vice versa. As advocates of marriage we must also be advocates of familial relationships, even when they are broken, as in divorce, breaking up or whatever, (and YES, when you make a baby with some other person, you are now family, marriage or not). It matters to mothers how the father of their child treats them and more importantly it matters to the CHILD (a lot!) how his Dad treats/treated his Mom and vice versa.

Fefe32

If he’s abusive to the child and/or endangers her welfare in anyway, then the child is better off without him. I know quite a few people who had their father in their life growing up, and ended up really screwed up because of it. When I was a kid I’d wished my father had been in my life. I was mad at my mother for not really allowing it. Now, that I’m an adult and have come to realize how he screwed up the lives of my half- siblings with his nonsense, I feel like I dodged a bullet. I’m so glad now the he was not in my life. Kids need a dad. A good dad.

Fefe32

Oh, and I just want to add that my mom never poisoned me against my father. She just told me the truth about what he did and didn’t do. He wasn’t a child abuser or anything like that. Just self-centered, neglectful of his kids financially, and emotionally. Running in and out of some of their lives over the years. Actually I’m quite interested in meeting him now. I’m an adult, he can’t harm me, and I don’t need him at this point so I think it should be safe. I’m really just curious about him. He lives in South America now. I’ve met his family members over the past three years. Nice people.

dani-BBW

Hollywood/the entertainment industry is such a broken place.

cns

If a black male or any man that has had as many failed relationship has Halle has most people would label him a jerk or the term we use around here is DBR. She has never had a good relationship with any man. Now let’s be really honest, if this was a man doing this to his baby’s momma he would be hated by all. Her exes have always said that she was needy and that she will turn on you like spoiled milk if you don’t cater to her every need. Oh and this french actor that she pretending to love and want to marry is a serial cheater. His rep is about as bad as her ex Eric Benet. So if she was so hurt by her cheating ex-husband , why would she consider marry another man with a similar background? Guess what, a year from now she will be crying a river about how she left her country and career for this man and he did her wrong. She reminds me of my mother, and that is not a compliment. Always undermining others then playing the victim. Sorry Halle, I love you as an actress but you are not being a good person right now.

Gabriel Aubry has been accused of multiple incidents of child neglect and endangerment … and one of the accusers is 3-year-old Nahla, TMZ has learned.

Sources tell us the L.A. Department of Children and Family Services conducted numerous interviews with people familiar with the relationship between Gabriel, Halle Berry and Nahla.*** We’re told DCFS now has numerous incidents that have raised concerns about Gabrielâ€™s ability to properly parent his child. *** We’re told DCFS conducted an interview with Nahla, who talked about her father and described incidents involving him screaming at her — and how it made her extremely frightened.

Our sources say DCFS has information about Gabriel yanking the child out of the nannyâ€™s hands, allegedly pushing the nanny while holding the child, and putting the child in harmâ€™s way while Halle was shooting a movie in Europe. As TMZ previously reported, the Dependency Court ordered that Gabriel can only have contact with his daughter in the presence of a monitor to ensure the safety of Nahla. But we’re told that is just the beginning … there will be numerous other hearings, as well as additional requirements that Gabriel must fulfill, which will include various forms of counseling.

As we reported earlier, Gabriel agreed to anger management counseling … but we’re told the Dependency Court will order more than that. Just a note … Dependency Court is different from the family court where Gabriel and Halle have been frequent visitors over the past year. Dependency Court is designed specifically to protect a child when there are signs of neglect or abuse. Being hauled into Dependency Court is far more serious than a family law skirmish.”

Pearl

I agree, some dads fight so hard to see their kids, and it’s so sad, how its this streotype how dads are uninterested in babies infants and toddlers when that’s not true whatsoever. Yes women have it hard and have been through literal hell! But men have it hard too and should be able to see their children.

AND I say again… this all could have been prevented. AND.. Damn.. she’s really gettin married? LOL

tteeswish

I completely agree with your views on this. This whole generation has devalued the meaning of marriage. when it comes to Marriage and parenting its not just about you or youre decision. Everyone now a days are so caught up with themselves we don’t know how to love and commit and care for other people honestly. In a marriage you are to love your spouse as you love yourself. Which me there is no Me and then you, there is only us and we. Every relationship is a gamble, but the effort to make it last and work together and compromise is what makes it all worth it. If you don’t have trials and tribulations you don’t have a real relationship. I’ve been cheated on and lied to just like im sure everyone has before, however the steps you take after the hardships, not what caused them is the solution. BTW Im pregnant with my first child engaged to a man with two children from his previous relationship we both want to move however to put the children do through that is down right selfish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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