Hanging in there today!

Hiiii, my Ex family. Just wanted to let you know I'm hanging in there with my quit. Stressful days again, because

Brian is sick again. When I saw him taking his nebulizer yesterday I just sat here and watched. Feeling sad and lost that he has to do this. It struck me that I will have to do the same thing one day if I don't stay quit.

He has to get on more antibiotics today, and I'm going in with him when he sees the Dr. Sometimes it feels like I am his mommy there to make sure he doesn't get a prescription that he is allergic to and he is to many. He's getting very tired of fighting his illnesses, and the other night I thought I might loose him in the night. I am praying he will be all right again and that his depression will lift too. I will stay strong and not give in!! I will be sure to get out for a 1/2 hour walk today. Lately this week I have been pre greaving. Every time I realize that the end of his life is coming and that there won't be any more bouncing back for him, and that I will be alone to carry on I get sad. My emotions and tears are close to the surface. All I can do is pray for at least another six months with him. I feel so helpless that I can't do anything to help him other than love and give him empathy and sympathy and take care of him in the best way possible. I don't want to be alone!!! I feel like I will go crazy when I finally do loose him. Giving it up to God here,

Oh sweet Christine I have tears in my eyes reading this, my thoughts and prayers are with you and Brian and I am sending extra prayers up for his Dr's appointment today and extra prayers for you for strength because being the care giver is extremely hard and you're one strong lady even though at times you think your not know that God is with you and Brian and we're all here for you Christine13 , pm me anytime or better yet call me anytime at all my dear sweet Canadian friend. (((((Huge loving, caring cyber hug for you)))))

So sorry you are experiencing such a painful time. Anyone who loves and supports another when their body is giving up is amazing. To do so while fighting your own demons is nothing short of incredible. Hang in there lady, you and your family are in my prayers.

I am so sorry for what you are going through! My husband and I both have COPD. Mine is more severe than his and I have a nodule in my lung. I am quitting smoking and he is not. I frequently think of that day when 1 of us loses the other and I can't stand the idea of being here without him and then he says the same thing. Just know that we are here for you.

Christine13 I am so sorry you are going through this and so sorry for Brian as well, it has to be terrifying for both of you. I will say many prayers. What an ordeal you have been through. I am so proud of you for keeping your quit.

Thank you all, for coming to my aid. I love you all here!! Brian is my forever man. Took him to the doctor today, and he was prescribed antibiotics and 50 mg. of prenidzone. Smoking is dead in the water to me now! I see him doing his nebulizer and it just doesn't figure. He quit 15 years ago this August with my support. He did it because I was............no excuses for me, any further. My mental health is good, and altho my life is stressful, I can't see ever taking another drag. I think my mind is made up now, and Giulia I just read a blog of yours and about serial quitters, and to find out what was really holding me back. I think it just saved my life!!! An excuse is an excuse and an excuse!!! I am living my life and looking for the positives again!!! I used to smoke, I don't anymore!!! I am so very thankful for the EX community, and for all your loving support over the years. Yes, it has taken me a long time to come to this reality check, but I think I finally have it. God supports me in my travels, and so have all of you!!!