Monday, December 7, 2015

He remembers us!

A couple
weeks ago... or maybe 2 weeks. I was faced with something that I never thought
I would feel or experience in my life. So, we were having a good week, it was
filled with goodness, I had a leader conference and we talked about a lot of
stuff we can do better. This also included new rules or clarifications about
rules we didn’t understand. This made me feel happy and well the way I feel
about it is if they give us a rule we need to complete it and just continue to
work hard. Soooo, this stressed me out a little and I think I felt anxious but
I have no idea what it was. Anyway. I felt this way because my companion hasn’t
gotten to the point where he wants to be obedient with all the rules and I knew
that maybe he wasn’t going to like what I was going to tell him. Knowing that I
think it freaked me out because I hate feeling a lone in the work. So. after
that we went to the house of some old investigators that don’t really like me
because we stopped working with them because they hadn’t progressed in almost
over a year. We went there and talked to them and I tried to explain what we as
missionaries do. She was nice but said a lot of rude things to me. After that
night I’m not sure what or how it happened but it did. After a bunch of things
that had happened Satan, started to attack me... literally I felt like God had
left me... I couldn’t recognize the spirit and the only thing that was going
through my mind was the question, "Does God exist?" I suffered for a
couple of days praying and reading the scriptures. Finally, I got an answer
very clear from an Hermano here in the ward. It was the Bishop actually, we had to talk to him about ward counsel and
then we started talking about the atonement and he was explaining stuff. I felt
prompted to ask him what it could be that I was feeling or what was happening
with me. He told me, “Elder Smith do you
remember what happened when Joseph Smith was in jail and he said, “Oh God, where
art thou?” or when Jesus Christ was suffering for us and said, "Oh God why
hast thou forsaken me?” He continued to say, “Elder, Sometimes God leaves us
for a little bit to test us, not because we are disobedient but because we need
to grow."

During this
time the only thing that I was hanging on to was my testimony and the things
that I had felt and remember feeling about the gospel or when I was in the temple
or any other time that I felt the gospel strongly. Anyway, I got through that
but it made me think about how important it is to strengthen us daily. We can’t
wait around thinking that all is good because one day something will hit us and
we won’t be ready and we will fall. That
could mean that we might not find our way back.

I know that this Gospel is true. It is the life
that we need to live. I know that through Christ we can do all things and I know
that he lives and that he is the son of Our Heavenly Father. I know that God
our Heavenly Father lives and loves us and that even though we don’t remember
his face, He remembers ours. I am so thankful for this time on earth and for
the veil that blocks us from remembering so that we can learn and progress and
continue to become like God and Jesus Christ and so that one day we can live
with them. I love this Gospel. I know that this is the light that we all need.

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About Me

This is Chase Smith's Missionary blog. He is serving an LDS mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints in Chile Santiago North. His parents and three sisters and one brother and brother in law are all so proud of his choice to serve the Lord. This is where his weekly emails will be posted!