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Monday, July 25, 2011

White eye concealer = wtf!!! pandas! everywhere!

Pandas are beautiful animals. Sadly, they are an endangered species and we have to do something about it. The extinction of pandas is a serious problem. Meanwhile, is not by having panda make up that this adorable bear will reproduce itself ( same goes for you, furries).

Wearing white concealer should be a crime. I take this matter so seriously that i will translate this post to all the languages I'm capable of. White eye concealer looks bad! Let me visually illustrate you the problem.

When you use this product you probably think you look like this:

But in reality you look more like this:

Do you really want to look like annalyne mccord?

and if you have a tan, you probably look like this:

Here is when I come and save my lovely readers and friends ( may be you don't do this, but if you know someone that does, save that human. Or you can make your enemies sport the panda look....use as you want,I don't take responsibilities of the end result)

The solution is so simple that you should feel very very very stupid if you have panda eyes. Chose a mother fucking colour that matches you face colour ( I'm going to assume that you chose a good foundation, if you wear)you can go may be a shade lighter than you face color, may be 2, never more than that. Same goes for your face, pick a foundation of the same color of your neck. The market is full of concealed of all the colors, textures and prices. You chose the texture you want, . Make sure you blend that mo-fucking bastard well in your face, no lines, and you shouldn't be able to tell where it starts or where it ends, it has to gracefully blend in your skin.

Let me show you an example of well done make up vs. panda:

panda:

and eva longoria at some red carpet with human make up:

Do I make myself clear? panda make up looks hideous. If you have dark skin buy one with orange undertones and if you have light skin wear one with yellow undertones, never white, nor yellow or green.

Now you might be curious, why in hell does white concealer exist? Simple, highlighting. You can use it on your brow bone or the inner corner of your eyes, that's about it.If you are pale and know how to bled you can use it to highlight your cheekbones and nose bridge. ONLY if you are pale.

Also you can rock good old black metal corpse paint with you white concealer