14 comments:

I do have a few answers for you. As for the baby crying, we had that problem mainly at night but sometimes during the day too. We read a copy of Doc. Spock. He's not right on everything, but he was spot on with this problem. He recommended parents keep track of the time. Normally they'll cry for 20 mins at the most, but its so grating on the parent's nerves that they don't realize how little time has passed. I didn't believe until I tried it! If it goes past 20 mins that usually means he has a messy diaper or is hungry.

Can't tell you too much on snacks since I barely do the same for Bennett. But applesauce is a great thing if you haven't tried that yet.

How to help your spouse? Ask him what works. When we moved here, I thought that by keeping the house clean I was helping him, but later found out that he prefered a different kind of help /support(hug & kisses, snuggling, etc).

I LOVED the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Children" - can't remember the author...it worked wonders on Taylor...wish we would have read it for Tanner...oh well...we applied the same principles to his toddler sleeping habits, and both kids sleep really well, now.

Snacks: small cut up fruit - strawberries, cantaloupe, even grapes ...does your little guy have teeth? cooked veggies that are chilled? my boys love dipping - pb/ ranch/ honey/ etc. Crackers with pb or jam or cheese...my 2 & 4 yr old LOVE fun shapes and I've learned that a lot of food is overwhelming, so I do small plates and small portions. When they say they're hungry while I'm fixing dinner, they get part of their dinner - veggies, yogurt, etc.

As for the hubby - I've had to focus on him and not me...giving him the time to do what HE wants (even if it's video games or reading the news). Since he's home with the kids right now, I have to try REALLY hard to take the kids off his hands when I get home.

You'll get it figured out...and when you do, update us on yous success! :)

I absolutely love "The New Contented little baby book" If daytime sleep is good then you won't have the nighttime sleep problems, crying at bedtime, etc. This is also a good time to help Clay find a lovey if he doesn't have one already...something he can hug and have with him to help him settle to bed on his own. Try putting him to bed just 15 minutes earlier at night doing a whole nighttime routine (bath, book, cuddles in a dimly lit room with no distractions). Babies need help winding down but he should always be put to bed awake so he can learn to fall asleep on his own. The Contented baby book has schedules in it to help mom...it's very structured and we didn't do EVERYTHING in it but Belen did all the naps and bedtimes on an 8 to 8 schedule that worked a bit better for our family.

I never let Belen cry before making sure all her needs were met including helping her settle for bed...she was one who would work herself up until she was absolutely hysterical...she would never cry herself to sleep...but, like I mentioned if daytime sleep is going well and you help Clay settle for bed and bedtime isn't too late then you won't have crying sessions at bedtime. Good luck!! I'd love to hear how everything goes.

With your hubby...if dates have fallen by the wayside (as they do) put them back on the schedule and get a baby sitter

I am so glad that you're posting on your blog. I don't have any advice for your darling baby, but I do think it is important to make time for yourself . . . no one has commented on that. Get a hobby and work on a project . . . crafty projects always keep me sane. And get out of the house for a little while each day. Even if it is just going for a walk or a little drive! miss you!

I also love the book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child. I lived by that book with Lukas. It hasn't worked so well with Blair but Blair seriously is the oddest baby with sleep my ped and I were laughing at it at her sixth month check up all we can say about her is she is weird and to let her do what she wants since she is happy. I never let Lukas cry more then an hour for nap time (it never took that long.) Blair did cry the other night when she woke up in the night but my ped said she would probably for an hour to an hour and a half the first night. Last night twenty minutes. We are succeeding. My advice listen to your mom instincts no one knows Clay more then you do so you listen to your gut.

I am part of a book club with all my friends it is a blast. You should start one. We each take a turn picking the book each month then we discuss it. However, discussion is like maybe 20 minutes and the rest of the night is total fun hang out girls time. I read my book club book to get time for myself. Sometimes if I am having a crazy day I tell Dan I need time to myself and he will always give it to me. I also go to the gym every day almost for about an hour. It is heavan because it makes me feel better about myself.

Well, if you know your baby is tired, and fed, I think that they need to cry until they go to sleep. He is just testing your limits! But you are mommy, and you know whats best. I just had to let mine cry, cuz, lets face it...I have a bajillion kids...I love to do crafts and projects. it's how I celebrate me!I, like you, love to cook for my hubby. I know he likes aclean house, so I try to stay on top of all those duties. Find out yoru hubbys love language, and speak it!We like raisins, granola bars, applesauce, cut up fruit, cooked veggies, cereal...the list goes on!Anyway, love your guts. :)

Wholesomebabyfood.com is one of my favorite baby food idea resources. We do tablefood for snacks for the most part. If it isn't on the "safe: list because of size just cut it up. We actually do peeled cut grapes and avocados are as a first food all cut up or mushed. Bread products (Autumn diigs Annie's Bunny Crackes) in moderation so it doesn't plug him up if you're doing wheat. That opens up the wild world of sandwiches minus honey and peanut butter (Apple sauce and oatmeal for loosening them up and bananas and rice cereal for firming them up. Gross, but it really helps a ton. Heated lunch meat with a little cream cheese wrapped in it is a big hit. Yogurt is one of her all time favorites. You can toss in a dehydrator for awesome yogurt leather. Rice husks called "Mum Mums" in the baby isle of wal-mart in a pinch. Blue berries are a HUGE hit, and if you're not careful a huge mess too, lol, but not as bad as people say. If you like it, maybe he will too. We've even popped pomegranate jewels in her mouth for something just fun.

It depends on how serious she sounds for me. I know she knows how to put herself to sleep, so I'm not worried about making sure she knows how, so if she's really just having a hard time I'll go ahead and soothe her to sleep however works best at the time. Everyone's got an off day. Bouncing, rocking, nursing, etc. Weissbluth (who I love!) says they learn day sleep and night sleep in different parts of the brain, so it's not a huge deal to soothe them to sleep. If that doesn't work and I know she's just dead dog tired I'll let her cry, but not *really* cry, just fuss. She'll cuss about how she feels about the situation till I'm out of the room then settle down. I've even taken her out for a while or till the nextnap but a bit early to start fresh then soothed her to sleep when she was calm and ready again or give her another shot at it if she seemed like she felt capable. The BEST sleep advice I ever got was to put them down smiling and before they seemed tired. She can put herself down really beautifully that way. It surprised the heck out of me the first time. It felt like, "Kay, why am I putting this smiley little munchkin in her crib?" and she was out in 10 minutes with minimal fussing. Like, talking at me instead of crying.

I get up early. As long as I've gone to bed at a reasonable hour the night before, having that quiet time just me and the Spirit makes a magnificent difference in my attitude during the day. I read scriptures and pray. It helps me to refocus my attention on what's important. ...that and read your blog(0:

And for the last Q, at the risk of having my comment deleted, probably the number one would be erm..."marital relations." It's a pretty big one for most men. Taking the time out to give them that all consuming kind of attention on a regular basis is a huge deal...and comes highly recommended by happily married couples(0; Sorry I'm so wordy! You're really an awesome beautiful in and out woman, and you're doing a super great job! Love ya prety mama!

Aren't little ones fun. Just wish they came with an instruction manual sometimes... hehe. Here's what we've learned as we go:

Snacks- Ashlyn didn't have many teeth until she was after 1 year, so she was eating a lot of dissolving or mushy stuff at Clay's age. She really liked applesauce, yogurt, Gerber puffs, and cheerios. She also ate a lot of cheese (just like shredded cheese or string cheese pieces)Once she got more teeth we did a lot more whole fruit chunks and crackers. We get in snack time(and even meal time) ruts too and it drives me crazy! hehe It may help to try offering him a version of what you're having (if possible) or just browse the baby section at the store for ideas to make at home.

Sleep- Ashlyn went through a phase at about Clay's age where she WOULD NOT nap unless we held her. She would just lay in her crib and cry and cry even though she was exhausted. We finally asked her pediatrician who recommended we re-train her. She said at this age babies go through a bit of separation anxiety at nap & bed time. We needed to let her know we were there, but also allow her to learn to fall asleep on her own. We were told to setup a nap/bed time routine, as well as determined a set time for naps everyday. When nap time came we did our routine, put her down and left the room. If she was still crying after 10mins we could go in and briefly comfort her(but not pick her up), and settle her back down. We then had to wait 15min before we could go back in. If she was still crying after that we again comforted her briefly and then had to wait 20 min. The next day the time got moved back so the after we laid her down we had to wait 15min the first time, then 20... and so on. I'll tell you those first few days it about broke my heart listening to her cry like that, but after a week she wasn't crying at all. Since then all we have to do is tell her goodnight and place her in her crib and she go right to sleep. I never knew nap time could be so good!

Me Time- For me this changes every day. Some days I just want to sit and chill and watch TV or play on the computer. Other days I'm feeling crafty and want to sew or scrapbook. Other days I just need to clean the house! If your life is anything like mine, it seems like there are always 100 thing to do everyday. But I notice when I try to take a little extra time to do something for me (even if its just taking little 20 min nap!) I'm a lot happier and a better mom.

Hubby Time- This one is a constant struggle for us. Its hard to find that balance when so much of you time is spent caring for a dependent little one. I agree with the comment made before about asking him what works for him. I've had times too when I thought by doing this or that I was helping Ryan or showing him I cared, when really all he wanted was something else. Nights out also help, but I'll be honest they don't come as often as I would wish. We don't have any close friends or family where we live right now so finding a babysitter has been tricky. We just met another couple that has a boy in Nursery Ashlyn's age and talked about swapping temple nights with them. Hopefully that helps! Good luck!

*Healthy snacks are hard. I do lots and lots of fruit. Ella loves loves loves bananas. Applesauce is good too. Sticky pb&j is fun on whole wheat... if he is old enough. Cheese.

*I read in a book once that you let them cry for an hour. I don't know if I could wait that long... usually I give up, because they will most likely sleep when she is tired enough. I also recommend Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It is good.

*I am way selfish. I do lots for myself... read, blog, nap, shop.

*Taking care of hubbies is so important! Have you read, In Praise of Stay at Home Moms by Dr. Laura or... The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. Both helped me in those areas. I try to do little things here and there.

1. fruit (that's what Cole has always loved) 2. Since we've had our second kid, I have become sooo much more relaxed about stuff like that. In my opinion, not taking a nap isn't the end of the world (which is how I used to think about it) and they will sleep just as well that night. Also, just holding them to help them sleep is something I've also become more relaxed about!3. Reading "opening the heavens" from the August 2009 Ensign helped me a lot with this one. It helps me so much to get ready and to pray and read scriptures all before the kids wake up in the morning. It's me time and it's also me and the Lord time and it makes my day go so much better! 4. yummy food

I'm still trying to figure out those questions for myself! After reading all the comments, I actually learned a lot! I enjoy watching Clay grow up! He is adorable...a perfect mix of you two. Who do you think he looks more like?

I usually don't make Aden cry. He likes to be swaddled and rocked and or swaddled and bounced. If he is upset there is usually something wrong. If he isn't going to sleep I just let him stay up because it's not worth it to me to hear him cry. Aden does fine without naps so it works for us.

Husband thing, having dinner made when he comes home, getting ready and looking cute, head scratches, and playing a game before we go to bed every night. ;)

Oh also for Aden we make sure we have calm down time with low lighting his puppy and we read books while he calms down and drinks a bottle. A lot of the times I then just put him in his crib with a book and he plays by himself then falls asleep.

For snacks we like those little fruit cups because we can bring them out. Aden also likes whole wheat bread, cheese, yogart, applesauce, dry cereal, and gold fish crackers. Good Luck!

p.s. someone recommended pb and jam however it is recommended not to give kids peanut butter until they are 2. If you didn't know.

The sleeping issue, I have a very hard time letting my kids cry, I can only allow about five minutes and I want to cry myself. So when Taylor is having a hard time I sit on the floor by her bed and hold her hand. The next time I sit on the floor, but don't touch her. Then I just gradually move closer to the door. -It usually takes me about 3 or 4 days and the problem is taken care of. She always has set backs every time she gets sick, or is getting a tooth. When Sara was little I would lay on the floor and make designs on the walls with a flashlight-worked wonders for her.

The snack thing is hard. We make alot of our own -Lunchables- cut up lunch meat, slices of cheese and crackers. We also dip pretzels or graham crackers in everything, applesauce, yogurt, ranch, carmel, whipped creamcheese, blended fruit, jam. Whatever I can find easy.