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About Lesbian Coming Out Coach

Lesbian Coming Out Coach is a safe space for women who love women to congregate. Whether you are identified as a lesbian or just questioning what this means, feel free to read and give feedback on topics related to women loving women. Contact me at Jan@LifeAfterTherapy.com.

The Marriage Naysayers

The stats are in and just look at that huge spike in the number of people who are coming out on FB since the Supreme Court marriage decision in June of 2015! [See graph] I’ve been fighting for marriage equality since the early days when HRC wasn’t even on board. They felt it was pushing for “too much, too soon” and it was better to fight for civil unions. Fortunately for all of us they were eventually persuaded by grass roots organizations like Marriage Equality USA and Marriage Equality New York.

I had conversations with many people in our community who didn’t want marriage equality because they believed it was entering into a “heterosexist institution.” All I can say is, look at what this has done for people’s pride in standing up for who they are. We are no longer riding at the back of the bus. Perhaps we always knew our love was equal, but now it’s legal.

Some queer folk say we will use our unique gay culture as we become more and more accepted in society. I think some unique elements will remain since we will always enjoy those moments when we can steal away from mainstream society to be with one another. Will our numbers grow as we become more accepted? Will gay culture be not 10% but 20% of society some day, simply because people won’t be afraid to embrace it? Or does nature balance us out around 10% just enough to keep the population under control. (Um, memo to nature, with the gay baby boom this isn’t exactly working.)

What do you think, dear reader? Does the legalization of marriage help with coming out? Do you feel we will lose our queer culture? Post your thoughts below.