Random Reader Rant and/or Revel

You can talk about whatever is on your mind – quality of life issues, a beautiful tree you spotted, scuttlebutt, or any random questions/thoughts you may have. But please no personal attacks and no need to correct people’s grammar. This is a place to vent and/or celebrate things about daily life in DC.

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Rave: Really good first counselling session – and I didn’t even cry!
Rant: Have had a borderline-migraine headache since 10 last night. Got a crappy night of sleep and am so flipping exhausted.
Rave: looking forward to a fun-filled and productive weekend, as long as I can get this headache under control.
Rant: Trying to keep my breakfast down and get a sh!t-ton done at work.

Whole Foods is the only local vender, but it’s SO hard to get because it sells out super fast. I had luck this week at the Silver Spring Whole Foods on Tuesday afternoon… perhaps they restock on Tuesdays. I also had luck at the WF at White Flint, but they didn’t have my fav flavor (Birthday Cake). A friend also found all the flavors in stock at the WF in Glover Park on Monday.

Rant: My dad has been in the hospital for four days now (his lungs started shutting down from a terrible case of influenza) and has been unconscious and on a ventilator since yesterday morning. Driving the 8 hours back home after work today to be there. At this point, just really hoping he is able to breathe on his own sometime soon so they can wake him up. I’m mostly just in shock because he was perfectly healthy leading up to this.

Rant: Allergies. Time for my 8 month long Allegra pill-poppin’-and-lockin’ dance party to commence.
Rave: All the flowering trees around the city are collectively my new bae.
Rave: Had half a jar of nutella I needed to do something with and franken-baked some surprisingly good mini spiced nutella pies; which are currently sitting in my fridge dreading their untimely demise later today.
Rant: Ran twice in shorts and a t shirt this week and now have to go back into Winter Battle Mode in order to run this weekend.

Oh and my family is also the worst about keeping my in the loop about anything. I didn’t find out he was in the hospital (or sick at all) until he’d been in for two days. I got to talk to him before he was sedated for the ventilator at least. It drives me nuts that my mom decides it’s not worth bothering me over when things like this happen – I called to check in and say hi and that’s when she told me. This is exactly how I found out about all of my grandparents’ deaths also, and other major medical emergencies with my immediate family. I don’t know how to get her to just call me.

Oh my goodness. That all sounds awful. I really hope your dad’s condition improves and I hope your trip goes smoothly on top of that.
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Does your mom get really overwhelmed with family emergencies & have a hard time reaching out? Would it be possible to get someone else to call you instead?

See my reply to LittleBluePenguin below for part of the answer to this. No, there is no one else. I have a tiny family and if one of my parents doesn’t notify me that the other/my brother is sick then I will never know. She also doesn’t know how to text or use a computer (though I’ve tried to teach her a million times and she’s gone to community library classes for it) so my only option is calling. I usually call 2-3 times a week but it had been a week due to in-laws visiting from out of town.

Yuck, I’m sorry. That sounds really hard. I hate to say this, but to the extent you can accept this as reality, it may help lessen the frustration since your mom’s behavior is unlikely to change. Trying to work around it by calling regularly is absolutely a step in that direction. Safe travels.

Wow – that is about the most difficult emotional place to be in. Wishing you some solace. Also, look into getting a hospital/health care liaison to be in touch with you directly. Hospital social services should offer some services. Your mother may even find it reassuring to have someone deal with you directly when she might be feeling (as seems) overwhelmed and unable to navigate communications.

She did add me to the list of people that they can speak with on his condition yesterday. She has been so much more communicative once I expressed to her how much I wanted her to just keep me in the loop. She called me 4-5 times yesterday with updates, so I think we’re good on this situation for now. For future ones, yeah it’ll be important. I was also clear that when they switch healthcare providers (they’re moving Monday) they need to add me to their emergency contact lists.

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, and totally sympathize with being kept out of the loop. My parents and my in-laws do this because they “don’t want to worry us” which is incredibly frustrating. We had no idea my father in law had back surgery a few months ago until my mother in law mentioned it causally on the phone to husband like it was no big deal.

Oh man, eggs! I’m so sorry to hear this! Hopefully being on the vent and sedated will give his lungs a rest so that they can heal. I’m thinking happy thoughts for your dad. And sorry about your family not keeping you in the loop, my family does that occasionally (though in their defense, sometimes they just lose track of which of their children/relatives they’ve told – they’ll be like “Oh, we didn’t tell you? Oh, sorry, I thought you already knew, I thought we already told you!”)

No, I’m their only child to tell (I have a brother but he lives with them due to a medical condition – trying so hard to not get too identifying here) and they don’t have any other family. My mom verbatim said “I meant to call you but I got too tired” and then said a minute later “Well when I called Tom and Sarah last night” so she called random people from their church, but was too tired to call me. Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh sorry. Just so annoying.
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But yeah I think that the forced rest is going to be best thing for him.

oh, yeah, then that does suck. I have a huge family so I can sometimes understand when my folks totally forget who they talked to about something and who they didn’t. Hope your dad is on the mend soon!

Sometimes parents don’t want to burden their children with problems especially if they live far away.
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If they don’t initiate contact you’ll have to. That’s the reality. The only thing to do is just call more frequently.

It just figures that it was the one time I wasn’t calling every other day – husband’s 30th birthday, friend from out of town staying with us for the birthday, and in-laws in town right before that – but yes I’m going to make it a point to try to not let a week go by again.

That’s so sweet of you, I appreciate it more than you know. I have a really great support group of friends right now, though I’ve only told a few people. I felt like posting it here would help me get it out of my mind a bit since I really just can’t talk about it physically. The typing it out is cathartic for some reason. If I change my mind and take you up on it I will definitely let you know.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Best wishes to him and you. I have had issues with communications from family in emergencies as well. I’ve been really upfront that I want to know ASAP on any issues (so no excuse that oh, we didn’t want to worry you) – but it hasn’t helped. One thing that has helped is talking to those in the community that live closer and that my parents to turn to in times of need and asking them to contact me when they hear something. Sending you positive thoughts!

That’s a good idea, but my parents actually don’t have any friends really. I’m very surprised she called the couple she mentioned from church, but then she said she just needed someone to stay with my dad if he was released from hospital on Monday (they’re moving on Monday, making this even harder) so that’s the only reason she called them. They don’t have a social circle, so there really is no one else to ask.

That’s so scary – I’m so sorry, I hope he has a full recovery. Thinking of you and your family. 🙁
My parents can be terrible at keeping me in the loop as well. They don’t want to worry me so they’ve hid things from me in the past. It’s frustrating…

Rave: 8 mile run yesterday means I’m ready for the Cherry Blossom! Might even sign up for a half marathon.
Rant: My TWW ended so abruptly after 9 days. Very upsetting on multiple levels. Sigh.
Rave: It’s Friday! The weather looks bad this weekend but we have the last of our firewood to burn so it may make for a cozy Sunday playing board games in front of a crackling fire.

Awesome! I’m really looking forward to running the Ten Miler, too. I’m volunteering at registration on Friday and bike valet on Saturday before the race, too. Hopefully enough trees still have their petals on.

Have you run it before? Last time I ran it, the trees had already bloomed but it was still a beautiful race and the weather was great, maybe high 60s? Low 70s? Anything more than that and I turn into a sweaty, overheated mess. I hope your training is going well!!

Thanks! Nope, this will be my first year. I’ve done quite a few local races, but never the Ten Miler. [email protected] mess comment. I know they say low 60s is the perfect running temperature, but I’m happiest when it’s 80+. I’m pretty hypersensitive to the cold (Raynaud’s) so 80+ ensures no part of my body feels anything remotely close to cold, haha.

Ha! Complete opposite of me! I am a little furnace to begin with (my husband is even worse) and we always laugh about the way we look at the end of races compared to others–red-faced, drenched. I just say we have efficient cooling systems 🙂

Boo, I’m sorry on your rant. Is 9 days normal for your body? That strikes me as awfully short. I can’t remember whether you’re working with docs or not, but if not & you have trouble getting pregnant again, it might be worth getting hormone levels checked. Sending hugs! Have a big glass of wine or something this weekend. That was always my consolation on failed attempts.

Unfortunately I don’t know what normal is. I got pregnant pretty quickly off the pill (after being on it forever). My first cycle after my MMC & D&C was 76 frustrating days with an 11-12 day LP. This was my second and was totally excited to see it was somewhat “normal” until it ended abruptly. I’m going to a Dr. in a couple weeks to monitor, but I’m really hoping it was just more normalizing. 🙁 We did drink a bottle of wine that night 🙂

Hrm. If I recall correctly from my reading on the subject, the first “half” of the cycle is the part that varies, and then the LP is often consistently closer to 14 days. But there’s always going to be variation among individuals. The doctor be intending to do the monitoring bloodwork/etc in a particular time frame within your cycle, so perhaps give them a head’s up on your current timing to make sure the appointment is scheduled properly? (Though if it’s a first visit, the first appointment may just be a consultation & setting up a plan as needed from there) The whole fertility process can be so tough, and even more so after a loss. Hang in there.

From what I’ve read, I guess it can be anywhere from 10-14 days from woman to woman. 12-14 days is ideal for implantation. Anything less than 10 can result in non pregnancy or chemical pregnancy since average implantation date is 8-9 days after O. I think a lot of my frustration lately stems from how hard I’ve had to advocate for myself with medical professionals–I’ve literally asked for Day 3/Day 21 testing last cycle plus this cycle and instead they’ve told me I have to have regular cycles again (??) and see a doctor before the tests, but it takes a couple weeks to see a doctor since they’re booked and then that seems to delay things more since the timeline is so specific for this stuff. It just gets repetitive as they explain to me how the process works, and I explain to them that believe me, I know how this process works.

Rant: Grandma is not doing well. She’s been disoriented and not eating. They think this is a reaction to her blood thinners, but i’m worried it could be something worse.

Rave/Rant: I’ve been learning all of this through the family group text. While I’m thankful for a chain of information, these is something disquieting about receiving bad news via text. I do realize it’s the easiest way for my parents to keep everyone up to date. But seeing an alert with the words “prayers needed” is nerve wracking.

I’m so sorry you’re going through that. I understand the communication thing for sure, and I don’t have any advice since I can’t get my own family to let me know when things are going on. Lots of positive thoughts!

Rant: The new US National Soccer uniform is just not pretty. I guess I’ll just keep wearing my old jersey.
Rave: Eaglets!
Rant: I’m so over this cold weather.
Rave: There is a bag of Guittard semi sweet chocolate chips sitting on my pantry shelf that is begging to be made into something delicious. Now I just need to come up with an idea.

Funny story–we totally doubled the butter in this recipe on total accident and didn’t realize until about halfway through baking and seeing them spread and spread and spread. Obviously still completely delicious but a totally different cookie experience. We re-made them again the next morning correctly and they ended up looking very much like the pictures on the blog. Let’s just say it’s a forgiving recipe 🙂

Rave: Taking some time for myself this weekend to get a cut and color. Thinking of going red. Can I go red with rosacea skin? Will it just draw the red out in my cheeks? Times like this make me wish I was just a tad more girly and understood these things.
Rant: Allergies have hit the Anonafamily full force.
Rant: The freaking forecast. I am done with that white shit.
Rave: It’s the weekend! I missed you weekend!

Rave: Kind woman who found SO’s lost phone, called me and returned it to him.
Rant: In the past 6 months he has lost his phone, debit card, license, wallet and even left his bike on the front of the bus…I don’t get it!
Rave: Finally starting to get a few bites on the job hunt front. Hopefully something solid will come of this soon.

My husband is so similar. We bought Tiles and are instituting that as a way to track down last items. But when I’m not with him or he is distracted (which is often) he leaves so many things behind (suit jackets, camera bag, suitcases once…etc.). Luckily his co-workers know this is his tendency too so when he travels for work, they help him keep track of stuff!

I might have to buy him some tiles soon. I think part of the issue might be that he’s SO lucky and he’s gotten every single lost item back within a day or two so he rarely has to deal with the hassle of replacing things.

Rave: Matilda – such a great production. Brought up so many good memories of reading Roald Dahl.
Rant: Had spent three good, conscientious work days staying above the fray, focusing on the positive and substance. And then drawn back into the morass yesterday – so frustrating.
Rave: Took the afternoon away from e-mail to read on interesting work related topics in the park with sunshine.
Rave: Got back in the pool yesterday and looking forward to doing it again today.

Rant: Can’t seem to sleep through the night – waking up at 3/4am every morning, staring at the ceiling. Time to give up the afternoon coffee and see what happens.
Rave: I love spring!
Rave: Fun plans this weekend. Dinner with the guy and good friends tonight, hiking tomorrow, and brunch with a friend’s mom on Sunday. She’s amused by us “city girls.”

I’ve discovered that part of it for me is the birds outside my window wake me up and then make it hard for me to fall back asleep with all their happy chirping. I feel grinchy but I usually am thinking, “Shut up birds.” I need a white noise machine of some sort.

duuuude I just got a white noise machine on Monday and the sleep has been SO GOOD this week. I was waking up about every 2 hours for no reason, but I now realize it was probably that a cat meowed or something and the little noises were waking me. Down to 1 or 0 wake ups per night!! SWEET RELIEF!

What machine did you get? It seems like my spouse and I keep waking up at 3-4am a lot and I seriously think it has to be from sounds around our apartment, nature outside, etc. It’s at consistent enough times that I’m pretty sure something is waking us up (sometimes for me it’s obvious it’s the damn birds haha), but a lot of times I think whatever sound it was already happened by the time we both wake up staring at the ceiling.

I have and Haile recommend the same one as houseintherear.
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I also note, though, that if you have any use for an air purifier (e.g., indoor allergies), for $80 more than the cost of this white noise machine, you can get an air purifier that makes more or less the same sound and actually serves another useful function. The noise machine is basically a fan in a box whose sole purpose is to make noise. The air purifier is basically a fan in a box with a special filter to remove [email protected] from the air, and it also makes noise.
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I used the same one as houseintherear for a long time and was very satisfied with it. However, now that I find that I need an air purifier for unrelated reasons, I find that it also takes care of my white noise needs.

Random Questions:
What color are you looking forward to seeing this Spring?
Also, what color have you never really gotten into?
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Rave: I do enjoy a cup of Earl Grey in the morning.
Rave: Listening to John O’Donohue and feeling like it ties into what’s been going on this week.

I love all the colors all the time. I usually go for anything in the pink family, royal purples, lavenders, greens. I’m really into eggshell blue. I don’t really have a color I don’t like. Yellow maybe? But its growing on me.

Rave: Weekend! I wish the weather was going to be better so I could get started prepping my garden beds, but we’ll light up the fire pit one last time at least.
Rave: All twelve varieties of tomato seedlings I planted are sprouting. Some of the seeds are up to three years old – I did not expect them all to come up! Going to have to find more space in the garden…

PoPers – Where can I find a really good fish fry in DC? I grew up in Cleveland and assumed that everyone spent their Friday nights in Lent at bars and/or church basements, eating fish. Googling isn’t getting me anything current. Anyone have a recommendation? Preference is for a divey bar, but a divey church basement will also fit the bill.

Rave for someone else, rant for me: I’ve been fascinated by 1940-1950’s style metal kitchen cabinets for years. Always wanted them. Over the last two years, however, I drained my resources by putting in a basement apartment. It will pay off in the long run, but I’m going to be cash poor for a while. Meanwhile, someone has found a huge pile of steel kitchen cabinets in their family’s old hardware store, never been used – still in the boxes. This never happens. And I can’t afford them. Sigh.

Rave: my renters are nice, and the apartment is a great asset.
Rave: weather.

Rant: For the past several weeks I’ve been waking up at 4am every day. I don’t have to be up until 5:30 so this really sucks. Is this something my psychiatrist can help me out with or should I see a different doctor?

This has been happening to me too but not *quite* as frequently. Not sure if it might be a seasons-changing issue? Can you fall back asleep? If you can, I’d say wait it out for another week or two and see if you readjust.

I experience this from time to time and have read that it can have a lot to do with having swings in blood sugar throughout the day and into the evening. Particularly if you’re eating sweet stuff later in the evening, or having more than one drink, try to avoid it and see if that helps. I find that if I eat a substantial breakfast (i.e., protein and vegetables – not cereal or oatmeal) my blood sugar is on a much more even keel throughout the day and I sleep better.

Having a difficult “re-entry” after a month away. It was a super trip – 2 weeks cycling in NZ then 2 weeks sailing with friends in Thailand. But also so vastly different from my early/younger travel adventures. (When people talked to other travelers, didn’t just sit around on their phones) And came back sick (25 hours on planes will do that!) Love being back with my dog, and my own bed. Sad and distressed about the lack of fish on all the coral reefs we snorkeled & dived. But an extraordinary time spent with close old friends and new friends.

Rant: I can’t get new supervisor training until the summer, they won’t even give me the materials. I can’t wait to feel totally lost at sea for the next 3-4 months.
Rave: stopped at Fido and Kitty’s world and got DOG a wobble treat dispenser and a laser pointer, the latter being already worth the $4.50 I spent on it. And I found out their backyard dog park is free.
Rave: I bought myself flowers at Trader Joe’s the other day and now I’m sitting right next to them while I work. Pink! Lots of Pink!

I think I have the same treat dispenser, and as soon as my dog figured out what it did he was obsessed. Such a great time waster, or trick for getting out the door and having them too occupied to notice.

I got the Kong one because A. it’what they had in stock and B. DOG’s life is brought to you by Kong. Who knew rubber things you fill with peanut butter would become an empire? The even make the laser pointer I got.
I love it when he just licks the opening, like that’s going to get it done.

Question – did anyone else hear a very loud BOOM at 4:15 this morning? From these posts it looks like a lot of people were awake around that time. I didn’t hear any sirens or anything afterwards, so I assume it wasn’t an explosion, but it was loud enough to make me wonder and look at the clock.