Thursday, 28 May 2009

For the last couple of weeks I have been researching the art of creating habits and keeping them.

All the websites dedicated to organization say the same thing: start small to work to that something big and it all seems fairly simple. It just comes down to your own will power.

I know that I want to be more active, get more projects done, work towards those little goals that lie under the large umbrella that is my dreams, and write more. Write, write, write.

I'm so concerned with forgetting my memories that I start to get really depressed when I say to myself, 'You need rest, it's 2am, you can't write tonight.'

I also had to make a video for work today and I just looked awful. I had applied light makeup, brushed my hair and seemed fairly pleasant looking in the mirror, but the lens was picking up puffiness and lines and dark circles. With a turn of my head, I instantly saw myself at 40 years old and was horrified.

"What is happening to my face?" I asked out loud, in horror.

"Stress, tiredness," Jake replied simply.

Stress. Feeling tired. Well that seems fairly accurate. The last couple of weeks have been quite stressful, dramatic and uncomfortable. I wasn't able to get to sleep before 2am on most nights. And though for the past 2 days I've been getting out of bed around 7 and 8, I still haven't gotten to bed early enough.

Emma Watson, who I simply adore, goes to bed at 9pm when she is working. I would like to try this. I doubt I'll even be able to do it. If I did decide to try it, that would mean that I have less than 3 hours to get home, have dinner, do something creative and fulfilling (other than constantly loading tumbles) or just watch some content. That's nutso. NUTSO.

Oh lordy. Now it's 7pm! I got caught tumbling again. I'd have to go to bed in TWO HOURS! The sun will have barely set.

I will try to post something more enlightening each day from now. But I'm sure all who follow me know me well enough now, to rip out my promises and let the wind carry them away.