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Fear

I fear I will forget the moments that now string together on my wall-
polaroids cut to perfection, emulating the moulds that I resemble in those captures, melting into abstract forms as various seasons pass and leave me wet, perspiring, fidgety and forlorn.
I fear that the mirror, mirror on the wall, that till today fed on appearances and disappearances, calculating its move and manner to please and appease a heart so weak, will one day show introspections than mere reflections.
I fear that one day, I will cover my identity as people see me and acquire a name that will lead to a masked fame and people will forget I exist behind the mask and will I ever be able to remove it then?
Fear is a blue sky with speckled clouds, reminding you that hallucinations weren’t rainbows but spots that often crept on your screens and as much as you wiped them, turned the sky grey. And then before you know, it started to pour. Cats, dogs, dandelions, stars, tears and you eventually forgot the count.
Fear is the fear to forget that one day the hand might come down and you will have to stare back at the empty, spotted sky. Fear is to forget the stiffness in your face in shifting the hand to be able to squint your eyes.
Fear is senseless banter that begs to make sense. Fear is the death of sound in a drowning, deafening room.

By Chhaya Dabas

About Chhaya:

Chhaya is a storyteller from Delhi. ​She is a graduate from IP College for Women, Delhi University. She is the founder of Baatein- an online creative and poetic content creation platform and a budding initiative to deconstruct poetry and weave it into regular conversations. She is also a part time teacher;​ a freelance writer; an entrepreneur;​ a ​travel enthusiast;​ a social activist​;​ and and an aspiring novelist. She for the past one year had been working on a number of projects and is nowwill pursuing her masters​ from Kin​g’​s College London​ having acceptances from Yes Foundation Media for Social Change fellowship and The Young India Fellowship as well. She has shared this love for words on many platforms like Global Entrepreneurship Week, I Can India, Indian Youth Festival, Under 25 Summit, Scoopwhoop, Tell Me Your Story, She The People TV, Sheroes, Du Beat etc. and have been interviewed by ANI India, BBC, Yahoo News, Her Saga and have been invited as a judge, a panelist and a speaker by Miranda House college, IP College for Women, Smash Project and Smile Foundation.