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Saturday, October 30, 2010

Biggest German-built cruise ship completed

The "Disney Dream", the largest cruise ship ever built in Germany, is to leave its dry dock in the northern town of Papenburg on Saturday. It is the first of two ships to be built there for the US-based Disney Cruise Line company.

The completion of the ship will be marked by a firework display in the late afternoon, ahead of its maiden voyage, scheduled for January 2011.

The ship, built in the Meyer Werft shipyards, is the third and largest in the Disney fleet, with a length of 340 metres and a capacity for 4,000 passengers. Its special features include the first seaborne water-slide and virtual portholes in the inner cabins, which allow high-definition cameras to provide real-time views of the ship's exterior.

The ship will initially be docked at an adjoining pier, where it will undergo a number of technical tests on Sunday. It is scheduled to sail to the North Sea in two weeks' time, and will join the rest of the Disney fleet in the Bahamas by the New Year.

Its sister ship the "Disney Fantasy" is scheduled for completion at the end of 2011.

The high-way police: German officers spotted by motorists wearing cannabis motifs on their uniforms

A legal row has begun after police officers in a German town began wearing cannabis leaf emblems on their uniforms.

Bemused motorists reported sightings of the white, green and red motifs on the shoulders and arms of officers stopping them at routine checks in Hamburg.

The reports prompted one local newspaper to run the headline: 'New fashion or bad joke?'

Drug force: A legal row has emerged after motorists spotted German police officers wearing uniforms with cannabis motifs in Hamburg

German police have resembled foresters since World War Two with supposedly non-threatening brown and green uniforms adopted after the days of the black-clad Gestapo.

Forces across the country have only recently begun getting more modern, sober uniforms.

It is these new uniforms that the 'cannabis patch', as the German media has dubbed them, have begun appearing.

Authentic? The arm badge shows as green cannabis leaf with a police emblem, but Hamburg and Bremen officers are unsure if it is legal

Mystery now surrounds whether the logos are official after Hamburg police said they had not authorised their officers to wear it and blamed the sightings on officers carrying out a drugs exercise for rival force Bremen.

Bremen police have also shrugged their shoulders and admitted they do not know if the badges are legal or renegade.

A Royal Navy spokesman said: ''Arrangements are being put in place to attempt to tow the vessel to safety and Culdrose's helicopter Rescue 193 is en route with a back-up helicopter standing by at Culdrose.''

The Polish-registered 180ft (55m) long ship has so far lost one of its two masts, but there are fears it could lose the second.

A spokesman for the Coastguard confirmed the ship was carrying teenage cadets.

He said: "There are currently 47 people aboard the training vessel, including some teenagers.

"No injuries have been incurred and the vessel is awaiting tow. We are constantly monitoring the situation and staying in touch with the master."

The master requested immediate assistance at 8:03am saying they were in danger of losing their second mast and were experiencing Gale Force 9 winds.

Falmouth Coastguard put out a broadcast for help from other ships in the area and three vessels were heading towards the tall ship.

On route were the Container Vessel 'Andromodar' and Bulk Carrier 'Cornelia' and a large fishing vessel 'Nova Spirro'.

The 32-year-old said he felt forced to sample the food each day to ensure quality standards remained high, because McDonald's hired 'mystery clients' to randomly visit restaurants and report on the food, service and cleanliness.

The man also said the company offered free lunches to employees, adding to his caloric intake while on the job.

The ruling was signed by Judge Joao Ghisleni Filho in Porto Alegre, Brazil.

Ghisleni said McDonald's could appeal the case, and the Brazilian headquarters of the chain said in an e-mailed statement Thursday it was weighing its legal options.

While even a cheeseburger Happy Meal can contain 630 calories and 23 grams of fat, McDonald's noted that it offers healthier food choices as well.

'The chain offers a large variety of options and balanced menus to cater to the daily dietary needs of its employees,' the company said in the statement.

Living abroad, the firemen paid a £5,000 bonus to live in London

In dispute: Many firemen plotting to strike on bonfire night claim a £5,000 bonus for living London when they actually live abroad

Firemen plotting the Bonfire Night strike are claiming £5,000 annual bonuses for living in London when they are actually living abroad.

Leaked documents show that more than 2,700 firemen live outside the capital, one as far afield as Spain.

Eight London firemen are based overseas, including one who is understood to live in the holiday hotspot of Majorca and another in Denmark.

Another six live in the Republic of Ireland, three in Northern Ireland, two in Scotland and 26 in Wales.

Fifty firemen commute to London from Portsmouth, another 37 from Bournemouth and 11 from Exeter.

Others live in Newcastle, Truro, Sheffield, Doncaster, Teesside, Sunderland and Darlington - hundreds of miles from London.

Yet all of them claim the same £5,021 London weighting allowance, taking their average wages to £33,000 a year - a sum that can increase to between £40,000 and £50,000 with overtime.

The allowance is supposed to compensate the firemen for the high costs of living in London, but nearly half of them are using the money to enjoy more luxurious lifestyles in cheaper parts of the country.

Most of the firemen who do not live in London have homes in South-East England’s commuter belt and face travelling up to six hours each day to get to and from their fire stations.

But others live far beyond the normal range of commuting. Firemen work two days and two nights before getting four days off, giving them plenty of time to commute the length and breadth of Britain, boosting their incomes with a second job.

Fire Brigade sources say that absent staff share bedsit rooms in London to minimise their costs and then take four days off in their real homes.

The damning details explain why firemen are planning to strike on Bonfire Night in order to avoid changes to their rotas.

In total 3,101 firemen live in London but 2,743 live elsewhere.

A Fire Brigade source told the Mail: ‘We keep hearing from Fire Brigades Union officials that changing shift patterns will disrupt their family life.

‘But what they don’t let on is that many of them are conducting family lives in Manchester and Liverpool and Newcastle. There is at least one London firefighter living in Spain. No wonder they don’t want any change to their working hours.’

Another insider said: ‘These guys share rooms and pay a tenner each to save money and then go home for half the week.’

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Airport security stole my half used cleanser. Plane madness!

Funny, outrageous and downright rude. Who's in Liz Jones' firing line this week?

Illogical: Liz has her half full Sisley cream confiscated at airport security

A British Airways boss has criticised the draconian checks before you board a flight to the U.S.

He cited the inconsistency of sometimes asking people to remove their shoes, sometimes waving them through (my objection here is they don’t offer disposable white terry slippers, so I don’t have to walk on the awful, dirty carpet).

But what he should have talked about is discrimination, profiling if you like, of beauty products. Now, I flew to Edinburgh last week.

On the way up, I checked in my bag but, as the airport workers managed to cover it in awful black grease (have they never heard of Wet Wipes?), I refused to allow it in the hold on the way home.

I put it through the X-ray machine, and it was taken to one side and opened. The man got out my wash bag. He proceeded to empty it.

‘Everything needs to fit in this clear plastic bag,’ he said, waving one. ‘What is this, a branch of Boots?’

‘These items are over 100ml.’

‘But the bottles are half full.’

‘That makes no difference.’

‘But the cleansers are by Sisley — you are looking at about £120 worth. And it is a domestic flight. Just think of it as like being on a train, except it’s in the air.’

I was marched back to check-in, but was told it was too late to deposit my case, and so my Sisley products were confiscated.

They let me keep the Retardent mouthwash, as I had bought it in duty free on the outward journey — this despite the fact I had opened it and used it over the previous two days.

You see, it makes no logical sense at all. I sometimes wonder whether these people see a lovely bag, an exquisite vat of Chanel scent (also confiscated) and they wreak a horrible revenge.

HowTo:Smuggle a snow globe

Following recent terrorism attempts, the United States Transportation Security Administration (TSA), has enacted some extreme safety measures to ensure the population believes they are doing something.

Snow Globes are now contraband

In addition to reducing the speed of the conveyor belt and upping the amount of time spent staring at the X-ray Machine's screen, the TSA has banned snow globes amongst a plethora of other highly dangerous items.

Snow globes, originally harmless pieces of memorabilia and holiday spirit, have recently become items of interest for the United States Department of Homeland Security as they've proven their utility as weapons and smuggling vessels.

Contents

Most innocent civilians will wonder why the TSA has bothered to ban snow globes. The snow globe is a modern day descendant of the Holy Hand Grenades first used by Medieval Knights

An homage to the days yore

to launch balls of fire at their opponents, and disarm small, vicious, white rabbits. These traditional Anglo weapons fell out of favor for centuries, once knives were invented, but were rediscovered in Northern Ireland and have become a weapon of choice for some Islamic extremist groups.

The deadly snow globe is an ideal weapon for such low-budget organizations, since few organizations can manufacture their weapons from scratch. Most opt to use mass produced, readily available trinkets, that can be disassembled and remade into festive Molotov Cocktails. The benign, nay, joyous, appearance of these snow globes is what makes them so very dangerous.

Because many Non-Judeo–Christian-Disney cultures do not manufacture their own snow globes, the ban will result in decreased supply, and drive the demand for smuggled goods.

This How-To guide will help you achieve your snow globe smuggling dreams (and become rich in the process), whether you have larger nefarious plans, or simply want to bring your souvenir home without paying $25 to check a bag.

Snow Globe Breasts

If you are female, or a particularly pretty boy, this is the optimal method for you. This works best if you have small breasts to begin with, so try to recruit a modestly endowed woman or preteen.

This is why you should not wear a low cut shirt when using this method

This is a professional snow globe smuggler, don't expect to look this good on your first try.

Once you've assembled these items, you're ready to get started.

Place the snow globes in the bra cups, and put the bra on carefully.

Use duct tape to secure the globes, and ensure they are level.

Carefully put on the top. You're ready to go.

If any security screener tries to pat you down, tell them you've recently have a breast enhancement and would appreciate if they did not touch your tender breasts. Do not use snow globes that contain metal; the metal detector will catch that.

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About Me

So much news today is dull, depressing, controversial. It's almost impossible to watch news without hearing story after story of war, terror, killing, destruction, government, corruption, etc. I come across weird and wonderful news items as I scan the worlds press that put a smile on ones face or distract one from all the doom and gloom. These are the stories that will make up "The Quirky Globe". If you have any reactions to articles please leave a comment.... it may encourage debate. Pass this site on to your friends who are also fed up with mainstream news and become a follower. Enjoy and smile.