No messages from Seb since Saturday. Maybe his phone has been drowned in the rain. Or sucked dry by leeches. Hope he will send a message soon. Am missing him. There’s no point in worrying about it, I tell myself. He will be in touch. Must hold on to this thought. The panther dozes on […]

“It’s strange,” Seb says as we walk from the bus stop to my Office, “remembering the time when I lived here. It was a difficult time – I was in a bad mental state.” We’ve just passed the road where he was living when we met ten years ago. “I wasn’t,” I say. “I was […]

Watching Venus. Seb is on his way apparently. Could wash but it seems more important to watch this match. Venus is almost my age – she’s 35 now. Maybe won’t have the chance to watch her too many more times. Feeling very sad that Kauto Star has just died. A great, great sportsman. If […]

Looking at my phone, I see that the time is 5.15am. Have been awake since 4.04am. To attempt to return to sleep have: 1. Put the fan on its highest setting. 2. Am not even that hot anyway due to my new thinner duvet – 4.5 tog. Thank you to my Aunty for this. 3. […]

“I like my colour scheme, don’t you?” Mum says. We’re sitting on the terrace in the parental garden, and all around us are petunias of different pinks and purples: “They’re stunning,” I say. “What about those pink-and-green-ones from last year?” “Couldn’t get any this year,” Mum says. “Asked at the garden centre, but […]

“So, there’s a train strike planned for Monday,” I tell Seb when he calls yesterday. “So, um, what shall I do about returning home?” “Why don’t you book a train ticket to go back on Sunday night then?” He says. “I need to work on Monday – I’ve just discovered that I do have […]

Waking up with a start, I fumble for my watch. 5.15am. Ah, the joy of hot flushes. Sipping from my water bottle, wiping my sweat-drenched face with the towel that now lives on the floor next to my bed, I put on my Body Scan CD. After listening to it twice, I’m still awake. No […]