Reaction: Gossip Girl 3.16

Previously on: Rufus doesn’t want Jenny spending time with Damian, Jenny announces that she and Damian broke up, Eleanor warns Jenny that if she touches a dress she won’t be allowed back and she touches the dress, Agnes tells Jenny to do her own clothing line, Agnes models, Agnes and Jenny fight, Agnes sets Jenny’s dresses on fire, Dan and Vanessa agree to tell people they are happily together, Elizabeth wants to be as much a part of Chuck’s life as he’ll allow, Chuck asks her to take over operations of the hotel, Jack is pleased they have themselves a hotel

The title is a play on the film The Empire Strikes Back.

We’re inside Eleanor’s workspace, as people are making and trying on new clothes.

Her new line is supposedly “to die for.”

Rufus and Jenny are walking somewhere.

Jenny asks why they aren’t having brunch at home, since it would be their first since they moved back to Lily’s.

Rufus says he doesn’t want her to sulk anymore.

She points out that he grounded her.

He says he can’t unground her until she proves worthy…so they’re going to Eleanor’s.

Eleanor is having a pop-up fashion show for her new line and Rufus asked if Jenny can help out.

Jenny reminds him that things didn’t end well last time.

Rufus says she should give it another shot since she loves fashion so much.

Sweet of him. Jenny, you don’t deserve this.

We know it won’t end well, anyway.

Why the insist on showing models wearing nothing but underwear is beyond me.

Q1: There’s something about waking up on the day of a fashion show.–Blair

She is very happy as she strolls into Chuck’s kitchen.

She asks him to go uptown with her.

He says he’s having brunch with Elizabeth.

Blair says she’s happy things are going well between them.

Chuck says they both earned each other’s trust and she’s a “natural” at running the “mighty Empire.”

Blair wishes him a perfect day as security walks in. She leaves.

They tell Chuck to “vacate the premises immediately.”

He’s confused–he put his mom in charge but he’s not actually leaving.

They say “these orders came from her.”

He’s trying to hide his surprise.

Q2: My, look who’s risen from the dead.–Eleanor to Jenny

Jenny thanks her for the opportunity and says she’s learned a lot in the time has passed.

Agnes says she understands and was just trying to help, though she is clearly bummed out.

Nate, Serena and Blair rush to Chuck in some restaurant, wanting to know what’s going on.

Q13: We’ve all been players in a Jack bass plot. The reappearance of my mother. The lawsuit. It’s all been part of an elaborate rouse to get me to sign over my hotel to Elizabeth. You have to admire his handiwork.–Chuck

Serena suggests talking to his lawyer BUT his lawyer was in on it! (There were some clues last week.)

Chuck says it would take months, anyway, to win back the hotel through a lawsuit.

C says he has to talk to Elizabeth alone and convince her to sign the hotel back over to him.

Nate asks why he thinks that will work.

Chuck explains that this isn’t Elizabeth’s idea. Jack must have “something on her” and he needs to figure out what it is.

He leaves.

Q14: All this time we thought Chuck got his dark side from his father and it’s his mother who’s evil.–Nate

Serena points out that she might not even be his mother. They don’t know if the story she told is true.

Blair says they did a DNA test through the NYPD.

Nate says Jack could’ve stepped in and have it faked.

In the few hours that it took for the test to be done?

Unless Jack preemptively took care of it. Always gotta be one step ahead.

Q15: Whatever the truth is, Chuck isn’t ready to hear it.–Blair

Blair says she has to get ready for a fashion show since she has 30 friends coming. She leaves.

Nate asks Serena, “what friends?” LOL

Dorota is at NYU. She stops Brandeis, the co-ed call girl (hehe, that’s the name of a Tori Spelling TV movie), from the election night episode earlier this season.

Blair points out who Conwell is and reminds Brandeis that they’re BFFs from NYU.

Brandeis says she’s got it.

Q20: “What?! My mom said she wanted wholesome American girls.” “So you hired escorts?!”–Blair and Serena

Q21: “You couldn’t just tell your mom you don’t have friends at NYU?” “Prostitutes are people, too. And they have a lot of disposable income.”–Serena and Blair

Funny but Serena was genuinely making an important point.

Will we see more of Blair trying to open up to Eleanor? More of Blair realizing she could use more actual, real friendships?

At the loft, Dan is sleeping in a chair.

Vanessa wakes him with a kiss. It’s slightly creepy.

She’s dressed like housewife from the 50s or something.

It’s supposed to be like Hitchcock’s Rear Window, apparently.

Everyone is getting ready backstage.

Jenny seems to be in charge. Odd, no?

She spies Agnes divvying out pills and asks her what she’s doing.

Agnes says how J wasn’t going to use them.

J asks about her sobriety.

Agnes says she needs “the Waldorfs of the world” to thinks she’s sober so she can get hired.

Very Alex, ala One Tree Hill.

Q22: What are you gonna do? Walk up to Eleanor and tell her a drug dealer dumped your virgin ass and now the rest of her models are high on his stash?–Agnes

Jenny says that, yes, she will tell.

This is her second chance.

Q23: You may not want to change your life but I certainly want to change mine–Jenny

Cue Eleanor walking in. Jenny tries to tell her but Eleanor shushes her because the show is about to start.

Q24: Can we get these models to do anything? It’s like herding cats!–Eleanor

LOL

Q25: I think it’s time for Little J to say goodnight.–Agnes…

…says to that other blonde girl.

Said girl points out that they were going to wait til the after party.

Agnes wants to do it “early.”

Chuck has his remaining loyal employees bring Elizabeth to him on some random street.

Now they’re by some water.

He says he doesn’t know how much money Jack has promised her but he’ll double it in exchange for his hotel.

I’m torn here: should he be more upset about his hotel or his supposed mother’s betrayal?

She says it’s not about money.

Chuck asks what it is then, what does Jack have on her.

Q26: “I love him. (pause) I know it’s very difficult for you to understand.”–Elizabeth

WTF?!?!

Q27: “Jack is incapable of love! He is using you! He is stealing my hotel and then he will leave you.” “I know he’s not perfect. But he understands me. He doesn’t judge me. Underneath it all, he’s a kind, loving person.” “What kind of loving person would convince you to do this to me?–Chuck and Elizabeth

Q28: “When we started the game, I told myself you were just a stranger. But I didn’t know how much I’d come to care for you.” “So help me. Give me back my hotel.” “I can’t. I’m sorry.” You’re sorry? That’s it?!” “I need Jack. And I believe he loves me.” “If you believe that, then you deserve whatever happens next.”–Elizabeth and Chuck

He walks off. They’re both very shaken.

So she is his mom? Hm. Do we still believe that?

I’m surprised how fast they’re moving through this. I feel like they could’ve and might’ve dragged this out over episodes.

But I guess this is setting Chuck up for the remaining 6 episodes.

Deadmau5 cameo. The guy who looked like a mouse. I only know this from the Google Alerts telling me so.

Nate tells Serena he’s surprised that Blair has so many friends.

S tells him they cost $300 an hour. LOL

Chuck calls Nate, saying he couldn’t convince Elizabeth.

Q29: She thinks she loves Jack. It’s over. The Empire is gone.–Chuck

Nate says “maybe not” and wants him to get Jack to the fashion show.

I wonder what his plan is.

Dan tells Vanessa dinner was great while kind of complaining about it.

He insists it was “amazing.”

He has a surprise, too. Tickets to some movie marathon.

But she wants to do something different and “break out of our rut.”

Whoops. Wrong choice of words, V.

Q30: “We just started dating.” “What do we do now that we didn’t do as friends?” “Are you serious?” “Obviously besides that!”–Dan and Vanessa

Q31: I was just trying to put a little mystery into our relationship but if you want to just do the same old thing–Vanessa

Rufus interrupts. He came to get something.

V tells him to stay.

Rufus says it’s obvious this is a date and shouldn’t be like every other night.

Eek, Rufus. You don’t know what you just did!

Q32: Really? ‘Cause that sounds exactly like what Dan wants.–Vanessa

She walks off.

Rufus asks what’s going on and Dan says he’s not sure.

You’re not sure? It’s pretty clear to me. She wants to do something NEW.

Bunch of models, um, modeling.

Blair tells Cornwell that everyone looks good in the line.

He says the line does speak for itself but he will never carry it if “this is the kind of clientele” it attracts.

Blair is shocked.

Q33: “What?! It attracts all kinds. Everyone is here!” “I can see that. Apparently even prostitutes.”–Blair and Cornwell

Brandeis told him! I guess she wanted to get B back for what went down in November? (My memory is hazy, though. I could just look it up. But eh.)

How will Blair explain this to her mom??

Agnes is now strutting her stuff.

And other models.

And Eleanor comes out, takes a bow.

The blonde girl from backstage calls Jenny over, saying Eleanor wants to congratulate her. She gives her a glass of champagne or wine or something.

Jenny drinks up.

Agnes asks if the girl if she gave Jenny one or two. But she gave three!

Q34: We hear Eleanor’s show brought down the house. Sounds like a night to remember–if you can.–Gossip Girl

Back from commercial and Jenny is already feeling the effects. I wonder how much time has passed.

Agnes asks if she’s okay, if the champagne went to her head.

Jenny, in her dazed and confused (heh) state, realizes Agnes put something in her drink.

Jenny is seeing double of Agnes–lovely–as Agnes explains she wanted “payback” for last year and “Damian’s party favors just fell into [her] lap.”

Agnes says she wasn’t going to stand around all day and watch Eleanor and Jenny be BFF.

She says she was going to have her own fashion line and change her life but Jenny did it on her own last year.

So now…

Q35: Cheers to you, J.–Agnes

She pushes J and she nearly falls but the other girls catch her.

Jack walks over to Nate.

Q36: I hear my nephew is ready to cry uncle.–Jack

Clever!

Nate tells Jack to wait by the bar.

Call girls immediately approach.

Serena tells Nate now they “just need Jack to be Jack.” Hmmm.

Rufus is having dessert with Dan and Vanessa. Awkward.

She excuses herself.

Q37: I have to tell you, this date is a disaster.–Rufus to Dan

He asks what’s going on.

Dan explains Vanessa thinks they’re in a rut.

Rufus, like Dan earlier, responds that they just started dating.

Rufus says they need to talk this through.

Q38: She’s Vanessa, you’re Dan. You guys are best friends.–Rufus

Will stating the obvious really help here? I think not.

Especially since Vanessa just left.

Q39: You whore-and-a half! You couldn’t just keep it in your pants!–Blair to Brandeis

She explains that Cornwell was going to buy her mom’s line until she ruined it.

Brandeis says she didn’t tell Corwell.

B asks how did he know, then, that she’s a prostitute.

Brandeis says he doesn’t. But he knows Julienne is. One of the other girls.

Hm. Can Blair use this to her advantage? Blackmail, perhaps?

Oh, it’s JULIAN! A guy! That’s even blackmail-ier!

Brandeis apologizes, saying she didn’t know clients would be here.

Blair apologizes right back and excuses herself.

I don’t know if I believe Brandeis.

Blair yells after Cornwell.

Q40: “Your little friend, Julian, wanted you to know he’s running late tonight.” “Blair, I have a family.” “So do I, Mr. Corwell. And when you love your family like we both do, you never want to see them get hurt or disappointed. What’s that? You want to take another look at my mother’s line? Of course you can!”–Blair and Cornwell

Well played. But the storyline makes me uncomfortable. She could’ve seriously wrecked his life, as we’ve seen with several politicians the last few years.

Serena and Nate are walking down the street, talking about their plan: photograph Jack with the hookers, show the pic to Elizabeth and she will realize her mistake and sign the hotel back over to Chuck.

Sounds too easy.

They approach the limo, old-school camera phone ready.

They open the door. Jack is sitting there (fully-clothed) with the women, like he’s been expecting them.

I said it was too easy. He probably knew from the start it was a set-up.

But Jack has to get what’s coming to him in this episode, right? “The Empire Strikes JACK” “The EMPIRE Strikes Back”–or is it that Jack is striking back at Chuck?

Q41: Were you hoping to catch me in a compromising position? A little high school, don’t you think? Leave the plotting to the experts.–Jack

They close the door. Serena is going to find Blair and Nate is calling Chuck. Did they know about the plan?

The girls are putting Jenny into a cab when Agnes runs out.

Q42: Wait! This little one is not going home just yet. We’re going to see if we can get this girl laid.–Agnes

OMG! No! Really?!

Q43: Pile in, bitches.–Agnes

Nate is just a few feet, away making his call. He thinks he sees Jenny.

She says Jenny is ready to party and the guys should show her a good time.

They push Jenny towards them and the guys catch her and laugh.

Seriously? I mean, obvi Nate is going to rescue her. But still.

Amy Astley cameo. She’s a Teen Vogue editor.

Blair and Conwell go over to Eleanor’s.

He says they’d be “honored” to be the line’s “exclusive retailer.”

She’s happy…until he says they need to make changes to the hemlines and whatnot–and the name.

Q45: “Eleanor Waldorf sounds a bit uppity.” “Excuse me. For the last 28 years, every piece of clothing I have sewn has carried the name Eleanor Waldorf. My clothes are me.” “My store is me. Manhattan is an island in more ways than one. What works for you and yours doesn’t necessarily translate to me and mine.”–Corwell and Eleanor

He actually makes a good point. It’s true for the show, too.

Blair tries to remind him of “someone.”

Eleanor cuts her off. She tells Conwell that they won’t be doing business and wishes him well on his plane back to Salt Lake. (I presume that to be Salt Lake City, Utah. Are they that conservative there?)

I can understand wanting to do “every day” style versus designer-esque. But I wouldn’t think he has one of the biggest retailers in the country from being closed-minded.. Anyway.

Blair asks Eleanor what she’s doing.

E says it was a stupid idea.

Q46: I would rather lose the deal than lose myself.–Eleanor

Perhaps Chuck should realize that about the hotel. But perhaps Eleanor has more besides this deal, unlike Chuck.

Q47: Never hide who you are. Do you remember that?–Eleanor

Ah, here’s the real connection this has to the story.

Q48: “Everyone at NYU hates me.” “What?” “I have minions, of course, but they’re hardly even worthy of the name.”–Blair and Eleanor

Okay, I find it hard to believe that EVERYONE hates her, that she couldn’t make any friends. Though, Blair does need to realize that she needs to work on herself a bit and treat people better.

That said, I’m proud of her for admitting this. I hope she learns from it and follows through.

She reveals that the people invited tonight are prostitutes.

Q49: They’ll be anyone’s friends for the night.–Blair

Q50: I was scared to tell you the truth because I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me. I did everything to try and fit in. But I hate it there.–Blair

I can understand why she was scared, given their history and the eating disorder and all that. It’s a wonder that she hasn’t started that up again.

But did she really do EVERYTHING to try and fit in? No.

Eleanor hugs her.

Q51: “One of the things that makes Waldorf women so special is that we don’t fit in everywhere.” “I don’t feel like I fit in anywhere.” “That’s because you haven’t found the right place yet. You will.”–Eleanor and Blair

A) No one fits in everywhere. B) I’m surprised Blair said that. I would think she would think the only place she fits in is with Chuck.

Eleanor walks away, leaving Blair looking comforted.

The guys at the bar are having shots and then leaving. One asks about “blondie” and the other says they’ll have the bartender call her a cab.

I guess nothing happened.

Jenny is fiddling with her phone, though. Who is she calling?

Or, someone’s calling her. Nate!

He wants to know where she is but she doesn’t know and she feels sick.

He uses one of those cool tracking devices on the phone–clearly not the old camera phone from earlier–to find where he is in relation her.

She is many blocks south and east of him. That’s all I can really tell. (Which is shameful, considering where I live, but moving on…)

He says he’s coming to get her and she tells him to hurry.

Umm. He’s gotta be AT LEAST 15 minutes away.

One of the guys is eyeing her.

Dan goes to Vanessa’s dorm room, asking to talk.

He wants to know what happened. Um, Dan, get a clue, buddy!

She gives him one…

Q52: Don’t you worry we do all the same stuff we did as best friends?–Vanessa

Am I really at 52 quotes? This has to be a record. Or I miscounted. The latter is totally possible. And likely.

She gives examples. The only thing different now is the sex.

Q53: I wanted to do something to say, “Hello! We’re more than friends with benefits.”

Dan says things aren’t the same.

Q54: And if you give me a chance, I want to take you on the most romantic second first date you’ve ever had.–Dan

So tonight was supposed to be their first date? I think I missed that part.

She asks where and he says it’s a surprise–clearly ’cause he has no idea–and kisses her. She’s sold, though.

Chuck walks up to Elizabeth on the street.

Q55: “I hope you didn’t bring me here to gloat over your boyfriend’s loyalty.” “I called you because this afternoon I didn’t have the courage to tell you that I signed the hotel over to Jack. Seeing you made me realize what I’ve done and so I told him he had to make a choice–me or the hotel.” “And what did my uncle say?” “My flight to Zurick leaves at 10. I wanted to say goodbye. I’m sorry. I tried.” “Stay. Not for Jack or the hotel. Stay for me. I already lost my mother once.” “Chuck, I’m not your mother. I don’t know if your real mother is alive or not but I’m sure she loved you very much and that she’s nothing like me.” “You’re right. Because my real mother could never have done to me what you did.”–Chuck and Elizabeth

He walks away in tears.

Wow. But, again, I have to ask: do we believe her? Maybe she really is his mother but knows she’s hurt him and it’s best that she leaves so she’s just telling him that she’s not really her. No? Okay.

But let’s think about how this whole thing start–Chuck spotted her at the grave, she saw him and ran, leaving behind the locket.

How did she and Jack know he was going to be there?

Maybe that was a happy coincidence? And if it didn’t happen, they would’ve set things in motion some other way?

Going over to Bart, for a second, that means that what Chuck did know is indeed true: he has has always hated his son for killing his mom.

Sigh. I don’t know how I feel about all this. Need. Time. To. Process.

Nate is at the club place, looking around.

He overhears one of the guys saying that they need to call the girl a cab and that she looks like she’s 12.

Nate, getting all manly, asks what she is.

One of the other guys is lifting her up, saying she should leave with him and he lives real close.

She mumbles, asking where Nate is.

The guy asks if Nate is her BF and says that he shouldn’t have left her.

Nate enters, takes Jenny from the guy (who says he was helping her, to which Nate says “sure you were” a lot less pissed off that I would’ve expected) and leads her out.

Q56: It seems chivalry isn’t dead after all. Lucky for this damsel in a dress, some things never go out of fashion.–Gossip Girl

Nate and Jenny walk into the penthouse. She seems lightyears better, though still far from completely.

She’s nervous to see her dad. Nate suggests she claim she’s “exhausted.” I feel like that’s the lamest excuse ever.

Rufus comes in, asking how the show was and expressing that he thought she’d be home sooner.

She apologizes for being late and says the show was great.

Nate says there weren’t any cabs so he walked her home.

She says she’s tired and going to “crash.”

She seems even lightyears better than she was at the start of this scene.

She walks off and Rufus thanks Nate for seeing her home.

He starts to leave and realizes he’s still holding Jenny’s bag. Hm.

Blair tells S how she told her mom the truth about NYU. Serena says she’s proud or glad or something. Same diff.

Q57: Why?! What good does the truth ever do?! My mother can’t help me make friends!–Blair

Oh, B. You never do learn, do you?

Some girls walk up, asking Blair if she’s, um, Blair.

They go to Colombia (like Nate! Supposedly.). And they thought Blair was dead because…

Q59: “You okay?” “What’s wrong with me?” “Nothing is wrong with you. What are you talking about?” “Like, how did I end up here?” “Jenny, look at me. Okay, things haven’t been exactly so easy for me, either. But now I’m with Serena and I’m so happy. Things will turn around for you, too.” “Yeah. What if you’re wrong, Nate? What if–“–Nate and Jenny

Her phone beeps.

It’s Eleanor. A text. Saying she’s hired and wants to have lunch tomorrow.

Q60: “Wow.” “See! I hope you learn from this. Mostly, that I’m always right.” “Oh, god, Nate. Thank you so much for tonight.” “You’re welcome.”–Jenny and Nate

They hug. He leaves. She gets a shy smile on his face. You know what’s coming next.

But at least he said he’s happy with Serena?

Dan and Vanessa are eating take-out on her dorm room bed.

She points out that if this is his big date, it’s what they always do.

He says the difference is now they get to do “this” and he kisses her.

Q61: “And that’s called being friends with benefits.” “No. Because for me, the benefit is that even though we’re doing what we always do, eating perogies and going to see [movies] for the sixth time–” “We’ve only seen him 4 times.” “But now I get to do them with my girlfriend. Which is why just sitting here is the most romantic date I can imagine.” “Humphrey, you just earned yourself some extra benefits.”

He moves the food and they kiss. I bet that was his plan all along. LOL

Oh, and he needs a haircut. I think I said this last week. Not beginning-of-season-one short but cut for sure.

Q62: If you are what you wear, you better dress the part you want. A few lucky lady can do no wrong. Their look? Perfection. And they’ve got accessories to match.–Gossip Girl

Nate comes up behind Serena and they happily embrace and then kiss.

Will he tell her where he just was?

Q63: But most girls get tired of the same old look and they’ll do just about anything to get the hot new piece on their arm.–Gossip Girl

Jenny is looking at a post on Gossip Girl that calls Serena and Nate “the golden couple.”

So S is still on it but Blair isn’t?

And Nate isn’t a “new” piece.

Q64: And then there are those with no visions of their own. Thieves of fashion, who will steal the shirt off your back.–Gossip Girl

Jack is drinking in the hotel room. He doesn’t look happy. Maybe just contemplative. He picks up his phone.

Elizabeth is getting her luggage put in the cab and answers her phone.

Q65: “Did you change your mind?” “I was hoping you changed yours. Perhaps you need to see the view from up here. People really do look like ants.” “How did I ever love you?” “If love won’t tempt you, then how ’bout money?” “I’m leaving. And I don’t want anything.” “Where you gonna go? You destroyed your relationship with your son. Who else do you have besides me?” “I told Chuck I wasn’t his mother and that he deserves someone better than me.” “Well, I’ll warn you. You’re taking off just when it’s about to get fun.” “I’m starting over. I’m going to try to be the person I forgot.”

She hangs up the phone. Wow. I was right! She is his mom!

I wonder what Jack would do with her if she stayed.

I bet she’ll be back in season 4.

Q66: And always remember, appearances can be deceiving.–Gossip Girl

She looks down at her locket, with the picture of Bart one side and (presumably) her and baby Chuck on the other.

Preview: Chuck tells Jack he wants his hotel back and tells him to name his price, Jack says “There is something that caught my eye, Blair is looking at a card that reads “One last chance to save your man” and it’s signed by Jack. The voiceover says, “The rules of the game are simple.” Blair says, “But if someone does something awful but it’s for love, is it okay?” She takes off her top with a pained expression, lots of quick clips, the voiceover says “There are no rules,” Jenny says, “Where is that place you can’t come back from?” and kisses Nate, Blair says to Jack, “Don’t flatter yourself into thinking I’m going to enjoy this,” Jack is holding Blair close by her hands, Chuck looks peeved (It would be better if this wasn’t a total rip-off of a season 6 Beverly Hills 90210 storyline)

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3 responses

Next week’s storyline is just like the movie “Indecent Proposal”… I wonder if Blair will actually go through with it. It would mean the end of Chair for sure. I could never see Chuck agreeing to it.

1042010

unknowntheartist(06:38:49) :

Thankyou so much for the catch up! I admire the time and effort you put in putting fingertips to keyboard to let us know what’s happening on GG..
Great work!

1042010

teendramawhore(11:44:27) :

Alyssa: Yes, it is like “Indecent Proposal.” That’s the clue Ausiello gave in early February, hinting to the storyline. See today’s Ausiello post for more. I think it could be the end of Chair, too. It was the end of David and Valerie on BH90210 (until a few seasons later, anyway).