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Five Things Makes a Post

New job! I have a new job. The place I was temping hired me in late December. I’m not doing exactly the same job, which is both “new and scary” and “cool and interesting”. It’s also been interesting to note that the things I was looking forward to ending with the contract (the commute, say) are now things I’m stuck with, and the things I was thinking I’d miss (the walkability of the neighborhood) are now things I get to enjoy longer.

According to the New York Times, my household is in the top 48% for the Seattle-Everett area this year (based on my unemployment for the first 3 months + contract for 8.5 months + signing bonus + hubby’s temp gig.)

Asthma has been kicking my butt lately. My nurse practitioner upped my dose of Advair and OMG I had so! much! energy! this! week! I have been enjoying it but also crashing harder at the end of the day.

A coworker was floored that I am able to pick up my father’s wheelchair and load it into my car. I pointed out that once I remove the back and seat, it collapses into a big flatish bundle. “But isn’t it heavy?” About 40lbs, really … which doesn’t seem all that much to me. So I guess the weightlifting is doing me good.

I have been reading more about caregiver stress and considering support groups. I feel a bit strange about doing it, since I’m not doing the daily hands-on care. But I am taking him to doctor visits, making medical decisions, getting his mail, managing his money, and being a supportive daughter.

Bonus: The new blog banner is a chocolate doughnut with chocolate frosting and Sounders green and blue sprinkles. These are sold by http://www.toppotdoughnuts.com/ at Seattle Sounders games.

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10 thoughts on “Five Things Makes a Post”

Congrats on your permanent job–you did good and they like you.
I weig \ht lift too–only 10 lbs. tho–but isn’t it amazing how much it helps in daily chores. I love it! As for lifting a wheelchair–not sure I could do that.
And as for attending a caregiver support group–I chime in a DEFINITE YES–go for it! When I still had a car, I attended some support groups and found them immensely helpful. If I still had a car, I would still go to them. Because of the common bond between the participants, the comaradie and compassion in these groups is noticable.
Thinking of you, Ann

Congrats on the new job! A steady, reliable income is a beautiful thing.

I think depending on the configuration, I might have more trouble with the size of a wheelchair than the forty pounds. Then again, I never made it to five foot three. There are a number of things that I would be able to lift and manipulate reasonably if they didn’t take up quite as much area as they do. That said, forty pounds is on the upper end of Stuff I Can Lift. And after the latest Cold That Will Not Die… it will probably be at least another month before I can work back up to that.

Asthma sucks. No, I don’t have advice, I just thought I’d acknowledge that.

You know, a support group might not be a bad thing, even if you don’t go regularly. You may not be the one doing the day-to-day heavy lifting in your father’s care, but you are a major caregiver, and the stress builds up. Add to that the nature of your individual relationship with him, and yeah, you could probably stand to spend some time talking to people who are going through some version of what you’re going through.

It’s easy when you’re caring for someone else’s needs to ignore your own. After all, that person is ill and needs it. But you need things, too. And you do nobody any good if you let yourself get stressed to the point of burnout. Believe it or not, one of the best stress reducers I know of in a situation like this is simply knowing there’s someone else out there who really gets how hard it is to be in your shoes, because they’re walking in the same ones.

After my mother died, I went to a meeting of adults who had lost parents. I’d been feeling very alone, since pretty much all of my friends who were contemporaries of mine still had a full set. It did a lot for me to just sit in a room full of people who had gone through what I was going through.

So, yes, I would recommend checking out a group. You may be quite surprised at what you find you get from it.

The income is good … on the other hand, I was kind of hoping for a break after my contract. At least we’re through the Christmas run-up now and things HAVE slowed down a bit.

The wheelchair is definitely awkward, but it does “flatten”. The seat cushion and seat back can be removed and then the sides come together. I do have to get a good grip on it, but it goes in the back seat of my car OK.

I have some friends who’ve dealt with this sort of thing and have checked some online forums.

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