Archive for the ‘Humans’ Category

So, I pissed some people off by writing about sexual assaults at OWS events. Which still has me shaking my head and saying WTF, but hey, what can you do, and true enough, I was not speaking in glowing terms about the protesters or the conditions in which they are currently living…how horrible of me, even though the conditions have been described as less than pleasant and well, folk like this guy don’t tend to make me think real highly of them- nor do reports of rape, child rape, and victims being told not to say anything…so sue me, hate my guts, whatever, I fail to give a fuck because holy shit, when things like that are happening, I am not the one being willfully ignorant.

And I don’t normally get too political in my blogging here. I, in general, try to avoid it like the plague, because I’ve seen and learned that talking politics with people whom you do not agree? Fastest way in the world to turn everyone into a buncha screaming morons who simply cannot agree to disagree, and anything and everything about that other person is immediately forgotten because they don’t have the same politics. Which is…well, sad and stupid IMHO. I can like a person and not think lesser of them if they have different politics than me- but that ain’t a universal trait. But oh well. I’m a libertarian, that is known. I am even a more right leaning libertarian than makes some folk comfortable; that too is probably known or suspected. And yep, as you may have guessed…I *myself* am not into or supportive of OWS. Do I think folk have a right to protest? Yep. Do I think they have a right and a reason to be pissed off? Yep. Do I support fully their right to free speech and to assemble and protest? Absolutely. I do. They can have at it. But I also think the second they get violent, or threatening, or endanger/harm/harass other people who are not on the same page as them (or in some cases are on the same page) well, then their rights do not outweigh anyone else’s. And I sure as shit think some of these folks would have learned a thing or two from history: You swing on a cop, you better expect you’re gonna get hit too, media darlings of the moment or not. You rush and damage police and city vehicles, expect you might get hurt when they try to move those things. You piss off enough people, be it by your politics, the mess you are making in their cities, or yes, by shitting on their lawns, you might expect they are gonna get pissed off right back. And maybe, just maybe, if you engage in violence of any kind or are afiliated with those who do or who advocate it (see second link), people might be violent back. Unfortunate? Yeah. True? Yeah. As I have said before, if I had these folk camped out in my neighborhood and one of ‘em decided to use my front yard as a toilet, there might be violence. There would definitely be a call to the police. And that is something I think the OWS folk and their supporters are forgetting…

Their actions? They aren’t just affecting the cops or making the banks and politicians take notice. They are affecting other people, you know, working and middle class folk like themselves who also got screwed, who also have debt, who also are worried as hell about the economy and their futures. People who, for whatever reasons, have not joined the OWS crew and merely want to find/work/do their jobs, get a good nights sleep, take care of their families, keep their towns, cities, neighborhoods, streets as nice and safe and peaceful as possible. YEAH, THOSE PEOPLE. They are also being affected. And they are also getting pissed off. I can promise you, promise, that if I lived right next door to one of these OWS sites, I would probably be pissed as hell at these folks by now. The noise, the hassle, the mess, the cops everywhere, yeah, I’d be real thrilled with all that right out my front door…especially when I am not a banker, a rich person, some fat cat business person, a politician, or anything other than another human being with debt and worries who got screwed just like a huge majority of Americans.

And am I the only one out there thinking to myself “This shit never ends well?” I can’t be really, can I? When this sort of thing does succeed, well, it ends in war. When it doesn’t? It ends in Kent State/Tiananmen Square. Hell, violence is already happening at these events between protesters and police, amid the protesters themselves, and if not already, soon enough it will be happening between protesters and non-police/non-protesters who have simply had enough. And frankly, sorry, these protesters? From what I have seen…I don’t have a real high opinion. They got no more screwed than a lot of other people, seemingly have no respect for those other people who got screwed but have chosen not to protest but rather get up, take care of their business, and pay off their unfair and often undeserved debt, or have concerns and obligations which are More Important to themselves, their families, and their well-beings than, oh, protesting. Hell, simple fact is, some people can’t afford to be protesters, and some have no desire to be socialists, or anarchists, or whatever else- or affiliated with them. That doesn’t mean they got any less screwed over, just like the protesters. And yeah, I think some of those people, the non-OWS ones? They are sick, tired, pissed off, and annoyed as well. And at this point, in thinking person mode I wonder…well, what happens when you have pissed off sick and tired protesters, pissed off sick and tired cops, pissed off sick and tired non-protesters, non-cops, all of whom who have been screwed over? Nothing good. And usually violent nothing good.

But you can only push people so far. And IMHO, it is never smart to push people who are more heavily armed and better trained than you Too Far, or people who have done Nothing To You whom you are infringing upon Too Far, and when you do so? You are a fucking idiot to think they will not push back. Thusly, anyone who pushes- be it a cop you chuck something at or Joe/Jane Citizen who you are sleep depriving and messing up their property or treating them like crap in the name of politics- should be aware you might get pushed back. And that is not a freakin’ excuse, it’s human nature. Period.

When things get pushed, things get broken. After all, revolution is never fun and games now, is it?

So yeah, been out and about reading about Occupy Wall Street and other assorted Occupy events, and frankly y’all, sounds like my idea of hell…a bunch of loud, dirty (often apparently drunk/high) radicals and hippies screamin’ and yellin’ and beating on drums at all hours and yep, according to reports from NY to CA, pissing on the general citizens lawns and embezzeling money from themselves (ah, the irony!) and well, basically a buncha stupid shit but, along with all that joy, there have been reports from various “Occupy” events in places like Oakland, Seattle, Cleveland, ect., that some of the women at these events have been groped, sexually assaulted, and raped, oh, and some girls too…and then the organizers of these events are encouraging these women NOT to report it to the cops, cause well, cops are BAD and how will THAT make the “occupy” people look? And hey, they are being nice and making condoms, special “occupy” ones even, so why do these women gotta go ruin the fun and the groups rep??? After all, what’s more romantic and special then screwing some dirty, stinking, been shittin’ and peeing in the park (or on a citizens doorstep) possibily drunk and or drug enjoying protester in yer tent in a rat-infested socialist/anarchist/feminist/anything other than capitalist make-shift commune? Nuthin’! Am I right? (Rolls eyes extensively). Hell, I even like camping, but come on- and generally when I do so- my horrible camping jokes aside- I don’t worry about getting raped, grabbed, or wakin’ up to find some dude I don’t know in my tent sniffing my feet…(ahem, yep, it happened to someone at Occupy Vancouver).

And what’s kinda funny to me, in that sick twisted way of mine- as I pop around bloganistan, I see Very Few mentions of this BS on feminist or lefty blogs…plenty of handy phamplets and Go Get ‘Em advice and encouragement, but only a few things like “holy shit these folk are living in squalid conditions, threatening violence, beating each other up and oh yeah, raping women and girls”…

WTF people, really now? Hating on Wall Street or not likin’ cops or politicians or whatever, yeah, I can see that…pretending like this shit ain’t happening? Really? Are ya fuckin’ kidding me?

Hell, my advice, if yer headed to one these things and don’t like my previous Girl, Get a Gun advice, at least look into a cattle prod…

I’ll be here with my firearms and hot water and shower and bed, waiting for the Zombies before I go all survivalist….

So, I was cruisin’ around blog world the other day, checkin’ out a lot of sites I’ve not looked at in months- some cases years- and I got to thinkin’. I’ve been doing this blog thing, here, at the old place, whatever, for awhile now, and it is interesting to see how much some things have not changed. I am not sure I count as all as one of those things which has not changed. I made a concious effort when I nuked the old joint to move- somewhere- forward, to the side, up, down, dunno, anywhere but there because there was a place that was makin’ me far meaner and nastier and crazier than I am by nature because the whole deal, arguing the same shit all day every day to people who are so set in their rightouesness is ultra frustrating. And it’s funny cause as I was looking around I saw a shit ton of folk saying the same thing: “everything is exactly the same”…and most of ‘em are people who are the ones actually stuck in the same old rut, unwilling to change or diversify or consider shit in a slightly different light- which is kinda funny. Its kinda like “no wonder everything seems exactly the same to y’all, yer makin’ NO effort to be any different.” Which makes me rather glad I did decide to, well, do something different.

Now sure, there are always gonna be things that piss me off, topics and views about certain things (like, oh, porn) that are gonna light a fire under my ass. That gal over at Hugo’s proves that. Sure enough, that kinda thing makes me mad. So yeah, been avoiding it- almost completely, because sure enough, nothing new is ever said- same old shit, different day, over and over, and no one ever fucking listens if what is said doesn’t fit how they want it too. I spent years dealing with that crap- and it ain’t worth it. People can rattle sabres and cages as much as they want- it doesn’t change fact or truth or proof now, does it? Nah, it don’t. People need shit- things to believe in, causes, a sense of rightness, whatever, something to do and something to look forward to and something to occupy ‘em to make life worth getting outta bed in the morning. So be it. Even if I think those things are crap and full of bullshit- hell, not my place to shine a flashlight, and frankly, not my fuckin’ concern.

Cause I figured out a long time ago, the type of shit I think of as feminism and the type of shit a lot of people I argued with endlessly think of as feminism? Two entirely different beasts. I am sorta of the mind that feminism, their brand, is a fuckin’ crock, and what I was for all along was equality- for everyone. You know, that whole “equal” regardless of color, nationality, gender, so on- equal for everyone, people judged on their merits and character and deeds and shit rather than…crap like sex, skin tone, and other things they got NO control over? I also think people- all of ‘em- have brains, and choices, needs and desires, wants and dreams- and overall tend to be pretty capable of knowing why they do what they do and don’t endlessly have to ‘examine’ shit. I can also say, for me. personally? The whole tribe women we should be united as a class and love eachother/have one anothers backs because well, we are women thing? Fuck that. Like anyone else I got people I care about, worry about, try and look out for. There is some kinda bond, friendship or affection there, and sure as shit they aren’t all women. From Rootie to Ernest, from Aspasia to Vlad, these are folk, both net wise and meat space wise, I actually have a kind outlook on and wonder about and all that stuff….and I am never gonna say some woman, or women, and their wants and needs so on are more important to me than the males in that group-or in general. Sorry, ain’t happenin’. I think the whole lot of ‘em, male or female, so on, should be treated equally and that means I ain’t gonna favor the gals just because they are gals. I also ain’t gonna say the gals are weaker, or more emotionally in touch, or less capable of making clear choices and decisions, or are more duped by the world, than the guys are. Imagine that? So maybe that is why-me and the Radical Feminist set never saw eye to eye.

Now granted, since I moved here and started writing about other shit than the porn wars and crap and it’s sorta been made evident I am not Lily Liberal and what not, I am sure there are folk who are going “ohhh, i get it now…she’s a libertarian redneck gun nut, it all makes sense”, heck, I’ve even had former allies turn tail and run. But sometimes ya can’t change peoples opinions if they are set on having them, and its not always worth trying. That I have most certainly learned.

Point is I guess, I have changed. Years have passed since I started back at the old joint, hell, I turn 40 come November, have retired from a certain industry save the occasional porn and art things, got tired of being the piss her off, point and shoot advocate, am more worried about the economy than if internet porn is making some women have body image issues, worry more about what the US is gonna be like in 10 years than if BDSM is erotically sanctioned violence against women, and have gone through a ton of medical shit that has truly made me appreciate the little things.

I’ve changed, so I kinda wanna say to all the people who are complaining about how everything is exactly the same? Well hell, if you do nothing to change that or change yourself…what the hell do you expect? Shit don’t change unless people change.

And just for the hell of it…bucket of guns! (not mine, but, I love the picture! It amuses me!)

First, I gotta say, you make three posts in a row involving firearms and I guess people start to look at ya funny. So today, no firearms, and back to some posting I promised. So yeah, let’s get on with that then, shall we?

It was prolly more than a month ago I read an article about a program up in NYC that had been set up to help out disadvantage/at risk young men- you know, provide them with choices other than crime and gangs and drugs and such. It seemed that the focus group of this program was Latino males age 12 to about 20. And I am not going to poo-poo such things, I think if we are gonna spend money on programs, any sorta program that helps kids and young adults avoid trouble is a good thing. Yet still, reading about this program, for young Latino males, in NYC, stuck this little hook in my brain, and it would not go away.

So I started digging around, looking into this sort of thing, these kinds of programs, finding out more about them: where they were, who they were for, how they were run, who paid for ‘em, things of that nature. Results of that digging? Well, results have lead me to believe that we, as a society, seek to help our most disadvantaged and at risk so long as they look the part and and live in the right places. You see, a great majority of these programs are in large cities, are geared towards black and hispanic populations, and tend to be far more prevelant for young men/boys than for young women/girls. Many are government funded, others are private and rely on donations from the public (often a few very wealthy folk)- which may play into why they are mostly in cities, after all, the government tends to pay more attention to big cities (more money, more businesses, more voters, so on), and well, big cities also tend to have more folk wealthy enough to donate to/fund private run organizations of this nature. If you look around, there are plenty of these sorts of programs in places like NYC, LA, Pheonix, Chicago, Philly, San Diego, Dallas, Atlanta, Miami, so on…BIG CITIES . You even find them in not so giant metropolisis like Minneapolis, Indianapolis, Buffalo, so on. But they are, without a doubt, a city thing, and geared towards a certain section of society: boys and young men who are black or Latino. Heck, even in NYC, it is far easier for a man to find a bed in a homeless shelter than a woman…after all, many times women have children with them, and shit, that gets expensive!

So, then I did some more digging and found some interesting stats, and really, not a lot in the way of programs, government funding, private funding, or even mere interest in such problems for these issues- at all-in the actual areas where they ARE issues! Aside from downgrading these folk as not important enough to HAVE programs… For Instance:

Hummm, you notice a theme there? Aside from maybe California & Texas, and maybe Florida? Which are HUGE states full of cities, but also gotta ton of rural areas too. Oh yeah, and well, pregnancy happens to…females…

How about Unemployment? I mean, this is an issue everyone can prolly agree is a big issue. And these programs address it a lot, providing people with job skills and work ethic and alternatives to crime and all those things…programs that seek to empower young men, and to a lesser degree, young women, to enter and be a productive part of the work force. And yeah, well all know the economy is crap, but…

States with the Highest Unemployment Rates are:

Nevada
California
Michigan
South Carolina
Washington DC* (district, not a state, but it’s up there anyway)
Florida
Rhode Island
North Carolina
Mississippi
Georgia

Once again, Cali on this list, FL and even DC too, but humm, a few over laps there, yeah?

How about the stats on High School Drop Outs? That one might play into this whole deal too, yeah? That putting young adults and kids into disadvantaged/ at risk zones? So here we go for that one, states and stats style:

Then I even kind of took a different tack, since I am sort of on the subject of at risk and disadvantaged… so how about suicide rates? I mean, for someone to kill themselves, shit has gotta be pretty dire I reckon. As a general rule, one is gotta be pretty dang depressed and lookin’ at a glass that is more than half empty to take themselves out…so, I looked into that. First thing that caught my eye is the leading group of folk who off themselves is white men, followed by white women. But lets look at the states and stats on that one too:

And then I looked into some other stuff, watched some documentaries on the History Channel, the Health Channel, A&E, things of that nature, where I learned that well, it’s not LA, or NY, or Boston or Chicago where drug use rates are jumping through the roof. It’s…Ohio. Where the abuse of prescription painkillers and heroin use has hit afterburner levels of increase. Ohio. Nevada, New Mexico, Colorado, Oklahoma, Missouri, Arkansas- dramatic increase in the use of everything from methamphetamine to heroin (and most prevalent amid white folk). Alcoholism? Very big deal in places like Alaska, Nevada (again), Wyoming and North Dakota- and seemingly most prevalent amid white folk and Native American folk. Oh, and for the record, the state with the highest rate of illiteracy is Mississippi I do believe. And you know what I noticed?

None of these places are NYC, and no one, from the government to private citizens, are paying too much attention or spending too much money trying to, oh…fix this? Help out? Do shit to help these disadvantaged or at risk people? Now, I had my resident Devil’s Advocate suggest the reason for this is because well, the government is focusing on trying to keep young men and boys outta gangs and turn ‘em into productive citizens…to wit I responded, the widely regarded most dangerous gang in, oh, the world? MS-13. Whose US headquarters are in…ahem…Manassas Va. Not LA, not NYC, not Chicago, or Detroit, or Phoenix, or Dallas. Yep, right here in good ole Manassas Va. And ya know, Manassas is not swimmin’ in the programs designed to keep kids from going bad, and it ain’t a big city either. And the world does not begin and stop, alpha and omega style, with young men who are at risk for joining gangs, yet there seems to be very little out there for anyone other than them. I also noticed, well, not to much interest at all in stopping white dudes, Asians, Native Americans, or…gasp…women/girls from joining gangs (and they do, believe it or not-all those groups of people in our society have/join/belong to gangs!)

I am also big on playing Devil’s Advocate myself, but I honestly think this time, it ain’t the Devil’s Due I am advocating. I dunno if people need to yell at their congressmen, or rich folk in town, or speak with their votes, or go to their churches, or what…but damn. Look at those stats y’all. Nevada sounds like one of Dante’s Circles of Hell as far as this shit goes, and (ahem) so do states like Georgia, North and South Carolina, Florida, Mississippi, New Mexico, so on. States that are not necessarily swimming in big cities or big money (casinos aside for NV). I mean hell, NY is not on a single ONE of those stat lists. Nor is Illinois! You know, where NYC and Chicago are! And you know…cause you can bet I noticed it, a lot of these states on this here list (not all, but many), they are the American West/ Southwest and the South. And with the exceptions of Texas, Cali, and Florida? Not swimming in cash, or…voters. And it leads me to wonder…why is someones son or daughter -black, brown, white, yellow, mixed, or any other thing, in a NYC or Chicago or LA or any other big city area more deserving of help, of assistance, of programs than someones son or daughter in Nevada, or Georgia, or Mississippi? Or anywhere else for that matter? Why are people who are more at risk for joining gangs or what not taking almost universal precedent over folk who are at risk for dropping out, getting pregnant, having no job, or, well, killin’ themselves? IMHO, they aren’t. And while I am pretty far from a yay government- funded social programs for everyone kinda gal, it seems to me if we are going to have them, at all, we need to spread that love around- make it an equal thing, with shit out there and available to folk in urban and rural areas, for women and men, and for folk of all colors…because damn, it looks like Nevada could use a program like the one I read about in NYC a hell of a lot more than NYC could.

I think it comes down to a couple things, really. Votes prolly has something do to with it….but I also think we, in the US, have poster child-ed (yeah, I made it up) a very specific type of person (young black or Latino male) as our most disadvantaged and at risk members of society. That imagine is not accurate, and not representative, and in fact, probably pretty dangerous all around for everyone. A dude who fits that image is no more at risk or disadvantaged than a pregnant sixteen year old girl in Mississippi or a drug addicted out of work white guy in Nevada…and it is long past fuckin’ time we figured that shit out and used social programs to truly help our most disadvantaged and at risk members- regardless of what they look like or where they live.

this gal. She may or may not have a rep for settling things with her fists, she may or may not have a record. You hear that she and some friends, all gals too, of varying similarity to her- from very to not at all- decided to go out for a gals nite; have a beer, listen to some music, maybe play some pool- low key things of that nature. Whilst out said gal is hit on by someone. This someone is not polite about it and will not take no for an answer, even puts their hands, uninvited, on this gal. So she decks ‘em. Hard. Like possibly police involvement hard.

Did the person deserve it? The getting decked? Yes or no?

……

Okay, now, say the person who got decked by said gal also happens to be a woman? Of the lesbian variety. Does this change things?

And then tries to have not only assault but gay bashing/hate crime charges brought up on said gal. What then?

Now, lets change it up a bit. The folk out for the evening are dudes. Of any color or class or mode of dress or what have you. And one of these straight boys is in the same situation and reacts the same way. Does that change shit?

I don’t think it does at all in my opinion. My opinion is as follows: Unwanted sexual advances, be they made by straight folk or gay folk are JUST that, and just as I would oh, stand up for or cheer on a gal who decked a dude who pulled that shit….I’d prolly be on the side of ANY person, regardless of sex or sexual preference, who stood up to, even decked, someone who was making unwanted sexual advances on them- and I sure as shit don’t believe them doing so is a hate crime. A pack of sneo-nazi skinheads beating up a gay person or a person of color just because they are gay or not white? Hate crime. A pack of gangbangers beating up a gay person or a person of a different color just because of that? Also a hate crime. Hell, ANYONE beating on anyone “just because they are – insert color, gender, sexual preference, so on- hate crime….

Someone decking someone else, gay or straight, because they are making unwanted sexual advances? Not a hate crime. Period. And any scum ass douchebag who tries to pull the hate crime shit on that sorta thing? Totally deserves gettin’ decked a few more times.

So, I was loungin’ in my modern den of inequity (firearms & liquor welcome!) furrowing my crooked eyebrows and cursin’ the government for makin’ cold meds that contain pseudoephedrine behind the counter, one box per customer and requiring of ID and leaving of address…because I actually have a goddamn cold, people…so being me I made someone else buy ‘em for me. After all, with my burn scar, sketchy tattoos and such I don’t wanna be seen, let alone documented, buying shit that oh, one might use for the production of crank, and I came to a wildly profound realization:

Y’all are gonna be in for a real shocker here:

I am one pissed off, burned out, angry, disappointed and bitter gal-which you all knew already I reckon, but then I got to thinking about the why for of that- aside from just being wired that way and predisposed to it- and truth is, much of my…ahem…loathing of my fellow human, regardless of race, nationality, gender, sexuality, or religion…comes about from what many people would consider little nit picks but they really aren’t, and in my most recent and amazingly laughable and frustrating trip around blogland, I have come to the conclusion that there is shit that I figure needs discussing and no one else out there, not the big shiny blogs, not the hipster feminist blogs, not the cool kids smarter, better, richer and worldlier than you blogs, not the males dealing with gender stereotype blogs, are gonna do it. So I guess I have to.

And I can almost promise a lot of the shit I’m gonna say? Well a lot of those who read here aren’t gonna like it. But, interestingly enough, I got an email today from a fellow blogger who said she and another blogger familiar with me were discussing me and my blogging, and what kept them coming back was that even if they did not agree with me, or if I pissed ‘em off, or I was caustic and hostile or whatever the fuck other charming thing I might be… I was honest, called it like I saw it, remained consistent, and did not alter or change my views like some wishy-washy dish rag lookin’ to win a popularity contest. And you know what? They’re right. Besides, I ain’t never won a popularity contest in my life and I reckon I am not about to start now. The simple fact is, I don’t much give a fuck if people agree with me or not, because you know-sometimes I am just right and like it or not, folk are gonna have to suck that up and deal with it. Like it or not. I am not afraid to call it like I see it, so I will. And I am not afraid to say shit other people won’t and in truth, I am sick to death of pansy ass whiners who dodge any topic or issue that is hard to deal with or unpopular and won’t take a fuckin’ stand because it might tarnish their gold plated liberal creds. I am even sicker of folk statin’ shit like it is word one handed down from some omnipotent being and utter fact then refusing to be challenged on it. I see so much holier than thou gender is bunk feministy uber academia liberalese wanna be genius bullshit out there that is missing so many basics it just makes me wanna puke…so fuck it. I am done. Done bein’ nice and civil and sugar coating shit. Done with not challenging the way people think and see shit. Hell, apparently I had a knack for that back at the old joint, so let’s see if I can kick folk in the grey matter with a verbal steel toed boot here. I am done with makin’ shit easy and the rest of that crap. If people don’t want to think, they can go elsewhere, it’s that simple. So, let’s get to it people. Let’s get to the dirty business that ain’t easy and popular, and lets start with the biggest Elephant in The Room: Class.

I hear you now, “here she goes again” but guess what? Class is the one thing missing from just about every fucking discussion on every goddamn thing out there. People love to discuss and debate race and gender and sexuality and all those things but class? Oh no, we can’t touch that one with a ten foot fuckin’ pole, at least not with any seriousness, and you wanna know why? Because classism is a dirty, dirty topic for dirty, dirty people and holy shit, it just don’t affect women, or people of color, it can affect….anyone, and everyone, including…white folk, and…yep, white dudes! And they are eeeevil, so everyone just brushes class and classism under the rug and leaves it pretty much out of any discussion about anything and by doing so manage to make themselves look like self righteous fools who believe in fairies. unicorns and that everyone out there has dreams of sugar plumbs and PhD’s and can afford one or both of them.

Well, here is a little reality and hardline for ya, folks. Class can and does affect people just as much as race, or gender, or sexuality or any one of those other things people love to discuss. Just like other so called advantages in life, being of, from, or in a higher class strata makes life easier for you, and just like other disadvantages in life, being of, from, or in a lower class strata can make life harder for you, and all the shit that goes with it- all of it- can and often does erase other advantages lower class people have in life. Point blank, right there, between the eyes. If people think you’re trash, they don’t much care what color you are, what god you worship, what’s between your legs or who you prefer fucking. They simply disdain you, regardless of any other adjective that falls before the word trash.

And how do I know this? Well, I know it, just like I know the sun rises in the morning and oceans have tides and the V8, enviro-friendly or not, kicks ass, because I have seen it with my own eyes. I know from that great bastard of a teacher: experience. The truth of that has been shown to me, again and again and again, and like anyone, I find proof in repeated case studies and experiments and via facts in evidence. And even amid the low class, there is one group, a sordid, unsavory subset worthy of nothing but contempt, mocking and disdain, and that group is low class white folk. White trash. The lowest of the low. The last bastion of acceptable hatred, the remaining dregs of human scum it is sporting to make fun of, the one group of subhuman filth the New, Modern, PC World reckons it is okay to rag on; without shame, guilt, or repercussion. Hell, its funny to pick on those sorts, all in good fun and edgy and shit. Hillbillies, Hicks, Rednecks, Trailer Park Trash, White Folk of a low socio-economic stations, they are fair game, the men and the women alike, and you can see these pariahs lambasted in everything from high brow indy theater to kids cartoons, and its all A-Okay. Some of the old Looney Toon’s episodes have been locked away forever because of their insulting racial connotations, but flip on Nickelodeon and sure enough, you will see parodies of poor white folk everywhere. It’s okay to pick on them-even in front of children, some of whom may be “those people”. Why?

Well, they are…gasp…white folk. And white folk, well, you know, they are supposed to have it all: all that privilege and power and money, nice things and good educations and the best things in life because well, they are white folk. If they are white and blue collar or even worse-poor, well shit, they must have…done something wrong. Be off somehow. Fucked up. They must be…well, inbred or dumb or lazy. They must be drunks or junkies or the products of poor breeding. Or Irish. They, those super privileged above all white people-especially the male ones- they are supposed to, by legend and the annals of the Oppression Olympics and by sheer force and determination, have it all. The White Collar I Won the Game American Dream on a Silver Platter: a quiche (fixed by a domestic) in every oven, a BMW in every garage, a double mochachino in every hand, perfect partners and 2.2 children, headed for Harvard! White people are…special and lucky and rule the world right? So if they don’t manage to oh, have the right house in the right neighborhood with the right look and all that right stuff white people are fabled to have…well, then there must be something wrong with those under-achieving loathsome scum. They must be deeply flawed. If they live in crap neighborhoods in crap houses (or trailers) with crap jobs and crap lives and problems, well, they obviously failed at winning the white privilege game and thus they are: trash. Go ahead and rag on them, because even with all that white advantage (especially the dudes) they still managed to turn their lives into a giant shit sandwich and they deserve it. They have weird ways and don’t fit in with the little white li(f)e and aren’t special. They, more than any other remaining group of people, are fair game for anyone and anything and no hit is below the belt. Hillbillies and Hicks and Rednecks and White Trash are the perpetrators of hate speech and hate crimes, right? They are never on the receiving end, right?

Bullshit. Turn on your television, or radio, or go to a movie, or read a book, or look at a newspaper, or hell, think of every joke about West Virginia, Alabama, Ohio, Georgia, Nebraska, Wyoming or Montana you have ever heard. If you actually want me to cite specific examples, I can and will do so…I am a bit of a stickler for that. And as the New American Nightmare, a Hick who not only likes guns, but has college degrees, I will say this: Everywhere I look -when people are writing about power, or politics, or gender, or feminism, or the sex industry, or just about any other fucking subject on the face of the earth they almost always leave class out of it, and they avoid talking about classism and its affects on white people like a rat with a broken leg would avoid a starving rattlesnake. No one discusses this shit in depth. No one wants to be “that guy”. It is the great white elephant in the room.

That fuckin’ elephant is lookin’ at me. I guess I am “that guy”. It’s part of the reason I am in fact one pissed off, burned out, angry, disappointed and bitter gal. And sure as shit, I am just getting started…

Coming Soon: “We as a Society Seek to Help our Most Disadvantaged Citizens – If they Look The Part”, “Modern Feminism is for Women who don’t Really Have to Work for a Living: A Personal Tale”, “Why Hipsters Should Replace Hillbillies, Rednecks and White Trash as Acceptable Humans for Mocking” and “Poor White Kids & Bored American Nobility- They all Just Wanna Die a Little Bit” (not necessarily in that order)

As most of you know, I am a fan. But, anyway, about a week or so back Vlad sent me a news article about a program where a community group buys back guns from the public…..but not real guns, and not from adults (a common program around the US actually-done by law enforcement), but toy guns from kids…they trade the toy guns for pizza and such. You know, NERF guns and squirt guns and so on… because apparently even fake, neon yellow and purple toy guns are dangerous business….

Seriously?

Now, sure enough, I know folk who do not let their kids play with toy guns, or swords or any such thing for that matter. No plastic green army men, no nerf sword and shield, no violent toys at all. I suppose that is their right as parents, but hey, I buy into the forbidden fruit theory with kids and I reckon those kids who aren’t allowed those things at home jump at the chance to play with such things at their friends houses! And I remember when there was a huge move, back in the day, to make toy guns look less realistic after some kid got shot buy the cops for brandishing one of them old skool water Uzi squirt guns- which you know, looked really REAL. I actually don’t think changing the colors was a bad idea really. I also know even replica/stunt / paint/ airsoft/ guns which do LOOK real often have a bright orange cap on em to distinguish them from the real deal…. (heh, ask Bullet Tooth Tony about that, he has a great speech on it), and frankly, all these little safety things that determine fake gun from real gun are good IMHO…

But….

The idea that merely playing with squirt guns, ect., deadens kids to the realities of violence and gets them used to holding firearms? Humm. Kinda a stretch I think. I can tell ya, all I gotta do is look out my front window to see a ton of happy, well adjusted kids, from super girly girls to rolly polly little wanna be tough guys runnin’ though the hose and having epic squirt gun fights and tossing water ballons (those are next I bet, they get kids used to chuckin’ grenades!) and having a great old time in the dead of summer heat and I really, really doubt ANY of them will ever actually SHOOT someone with a real gun. And these kids? They are not uber yuppie kids of peaceniks either. Plenty of gun owners in my neighborhood. Hunters. A couple cops. Military folk. All sorts of adults who have guns. And you know what?

I am willing to bet cash money that ALL OF THEM encourage gun safety and the proper use of firearms and have been over the dangers and realities of guns – real ones- with their children 100 times and see that they keep the real guns safe. And if their kids are old enough/interested in shooting? I bet these gun owning parents see that their children know all the safety rules and are taught properly in secure locations and all that stuff that goes with being a safe, cautious, educated, and responsible Gun Owner. Which is how ALL gun owners SHOULD be. And THAT is what people and communities should be doing- IMHO- when it comes to educating kids about guns.

Hell, when I was 12 or so, I went hunting for the first time. My family had educated me about gun safety and the proper way to use, load, hold, carry, and care for the rifle I was loaned for the hunting trip. I also got to see, up close and personal, what a gun can do when it meets a deer. And that was MORE than enough to show me the truly lethal nature of the weapons we were using. I never assumed for a second a human would fare any better than that deer did. I also worked, for a time, in my late teens, in a morgue. I got to see what guns can do to humans there too….and thusly, while I do like my guns, I have an ultimate respect for them and what they can do. Now I may just be a hick and all, but that sure as shit taught me to respect and fear guns more than trading out a water pistol for a pizza and a new shirt. I grew up around guns- not in a gansta laden neighborhood- but rather with a family and circle of friends full of hunters and law enforcement folk (well, okay, and few who had been on the wrong side of law enforcement) and WWII, Korea and Vietnam Vets and well, people who used but respected guns. The respect part is the key part I reckon…and the part that should be taught. THAT is what seems to be lacking when it comes to teaching kids about guns…and taking away toys that can provide a kid with hours of fun and recreation is NEVER gonna teach them anything about the realities of firearms and the respect they are due.

As for people, kids, so on, becoming deadened to the realities of violence? Well, that is a whole different post, and it’s in the works….

Well, shit y’all, if ya can’t just let it all hang out on yer own blog, then where can ya?

Eh, I am gettin’ real crispy these days- ala my title there- tired as hell but sometimes wired as hell too- naturally- which is also kinda gettin’ to me. I’ve been holding off on the back meds cause they destroy my stomach, but I had the serious desire to, oh, grind up and snort like six of ‘em today (I resisted and succeeded in that resistance) not because the pain was so horrible, but because I am stressed out as fuck and at the same time bored out of my dang skull and seriously have just utterly overloaded on humans in so much that I really don’t actually wanna see too many of ‘em at all these days. Despite my ability to resist the dang pain killers that oh, sit on my desk daily and I really haven’t been taking because while my back hurts, I like what they do to my stomach even less…well, I sure as heck wouldn’t mind my favorite illicit substance right now at all, I mean hell, if I ain’t gonna sleep, am gonna be sweating like nuts and grinding my teeth like crazy I might was well have a reason, and a reason I rather like a whole lot. But yeah, complications there too, and am fuckin’ sick to death of complications of any and all kinds in my goddamn life. Seems like I have had nothing but fuckin’ complications for the last three dang years of my life and while yeah, I have the occasional good day or not bad day- overall, I’ve had a real shitty run here and rather than getting older and wiser, I am getting older and colder. Just getting spun out of my damn mind holds an almost irresistible appeal these days, cause frankly? So much else simply doesn’t.

I’m freakin’ tired. And not just in a physical/mental lack of sleep way-but in all ways. I am, simply put, right now? Quite the Burn Out. And yeah, sure enough, I still got some of those Little Things which usually help me in makin’ due, but even with me? Sometimes little things just ain’t enough. Hell, overall I even had a pretty decent day today. Mellow hang out kinda day. Got some sun, smoked some cigarettes, had some fun, nothing I really had to do cause shit that needed doing I did the day before- the kinda lazy, chill day most folk would call fair to midland- but in the overwhelming pile of suck, wreckage and bullshit I’ve been wading through for the last three years? Even these mellow decent sorta days don’t do much to erase that whole older and colder, leaner and meaner feeling I got taking up residence in my soul. And aside from today? It’s been one of them weeks where the hits just keep comin’. Had a friend of mine say he had to kick me outta his life cause well, I ain’t a good influence and he is trying to get his shit together- which hey, I get, and sure enough, the fella does need to get his dang shit together, and I am rooting for him to do so, and if cuttin’ me out helps in that, then hell yes, he should do it. But, at the same time, one of those things that when yer not expecting it can hit you kinda strange. Got smacked with a dang bill I sure as shit wasn’t expecting- and yeah, it can be handled but it means leaning down the lean already even more, and prolly parting with my comic collection cause well, parting with childish things in order to handle adult business is shit that sometimes you gotta do. I gotta a couple folk I actually do like puttin’ me in situations or places where I gotta make damn hard choices and decisions cause how shit is -as is? Makes me feel really off and uncomfortable and angsty and wrong – like not right in my own skin kinda levels of it- but I feel like I have had to do a lot of hard shit and already make a lot of hard calls and each time I do, well, damn, there’s another one. And there is that older colder leaner and meaner part of me that just wants to say even to folk I like “fuck it, I’m done, I am gonna go get spun, and I don’t wanna hear shit about shit from anyone- just back off and leave me the fuck alone- better for everyone, really”…and I’d prolly be justified in doing so. But I have put my fair share of hurt on various folks and done some pretty awful and shady shit myself, so I don’t know if I will listen to that older colder meaner and leaner part or not. I prolly should, but hey, that part is one cold-blooded customer-even if it is usually right.

What I need is a goddamn vacation. From a shit ton of stuff, stress, strife, and society. I need an actually good day, or a couple of ‘em, where I ain’t gotta worry about anyone or anything other than me, and do right be me, and indulge me a little and not feel fucking guilty about it. I need various folk to back the fuck off and realize nah, I ain’t always a rock and ffs, three years of shit, I’ve earned and deserve a goddamn break. I have lost a lot. A ton of shit other fuckin’ people take for granted. Sure, other folk certainly have it worse and harder, but I have done bled, in a whole lotta ways enough in the last few years, and I deserve to be freakin’ comfortable and content for a while. I deserve to have some actually good days where I feel like I am grinnin’ and bein’ nice cause I actually want to and honestly feel that way inside, outside, and all over for real.

Right now, in about a billion fuckin’ ways I am a Burn Out. I need some time to scrape off the ash, by my rules and my way, cause that full-out older and colder meaner and leaner thing? Not real pretty, and when that is the prevailing voice in my head? Well, shit, no good comes of that, for anyone around me. All this shit is itchy, and I deserve to feel comfortable in my own damn skin.

and ffs, if I am gonna grind my dang teeth this much and not sleep, I should so have a better and far more fun reason for doing so.

Okay, so, been poking around in blogland today- here and there as it were- and nobody has kicked my brain topic wise, but the over all feel of shit I have taken a look at today has…hence, see title of post. Now, I will say frankly, that despite my actual dislike of them-in any flavor, color, or gender- I know a lot about various extremists. I would even guess anyone who has lived/lives in the South who ISN’T one has looked into it a bit, cause you are gonna get accused of being one regardless. Thusly, admittedly, what I know most about is white extremist groups. Hell, I talked a guy outta Norse Tattoo he wanted because I was pretty dang sure this fellow did NOT want to be mistaken for “one of those guys”. But in looking around, hell, you ain’t gotta go to extremist sites to see extremist shit, because all you need to do to find it is look at any hardcore rad fem or MRA site and BOOM, plenty of it, right there. And sometimes the stuff both are saying makes sense (just like any extremist site). Any extremist can and WILL find proof of shit that will back up what they say. It’s actually NOT that hard really. I mean a rad fem can say that women are far and away more often victims of sexually based crimes than men, and far more often those who commit such crimes are men, and they would be right. MRA sorts can say that men are far and away more often victims of paternity laws which are skewed in womens favor, and they would be right. And a sorta tit for tat can be engaged in endlessly….slut shaming vs trauma in wars, DV vs Police Brutality, so on, endlessly….everyone does in fact have a leg to stand on with regards to their views...just like white extremists, or black extremists or christian, jew or muslim extremists…they can, with fact, back their shit up.

What makes them extremists, however, and what fucks their shit up, is that they tend to apply it to everybody. All men. All women. All non-white folk. All white folk. All non (insert religion here) folk. All of ‘em. Period. There is no room for exceptions to THEIR RULE when, well, MOST people ARE exceptions to it. I mean, all men are sexual predators? Actually, the real unbiased proof suggests all men aren’t. All women seek to control men’s sexuality? In fact, no, most women don’t. All white folk are racist? Humm, considering Obama is President, I think maybe that ain’t really the case. All black folk are violent thugs? Uh, no, in fact, most of them are not. All muslims want to blow stuff up? Uh, no, most of them don’t. All Christians want to forcibly bring everyone else into the fold? Um, no, not really- and even amid the Christian Religions, there is a ton of variety (come on, I dare ya to tell a staunch Baptist and a staunch Catholic they are exactly the same…) all Jews support Israel and secretly are working to bring the world under a Zionist State? Goddamn, where is my memo! Ernest, did YOU get a memo? Oh, wait, I’m not ALL jew, so, maybe I didn’t get one….I’ll call my dad and see if his arrived in the mail yet…I mean, he’s been lookin’ for it for the last 70 years, right? And they all predict stuff…kinda like folk of a certain age, hell, generations from mine back through my parents, really, say anyone between late 30’s and 70’s even, depending on what side of the Iron Curtian they lived on, were kinda convinced everyone on the other side of it wanted ‘em dead, in the big Cold War cap vs com drama that had many of us diving under our desks in school for air-raid and nuke drills. Guess what? I reckon, and fact will actually prove, that most folk on either side of that curtain, cap or com, had no desire to hurt/kill/go to war with/nuke anyone. But every extremist NEEDS a boogy man, and unfortunately they are not too hard to find. Every rad fem can find a violent rapist or serial killer of women, every MRA can find an abusive mother, every white hate monger can find a gang banger, every black extremist looking for a horrible racist can find a Grand Wizard, and every major religion has some less than stellar moments and figures…there are plenty of examples out there that back up an extremist view….

But they are never the majority. They are a minority used to paint the rest of whatever group the extremist hates. A simple fact is, by chemical make up and biology- we ARE pretty much all the same. So hating on someone for a chromosome difference, a skin color difference, a regional difference, a religious difference- when so much else is exactly the same…it’s extreme, and actual proof? It won’t ever be on your side. I mean, at least here in America, you can hate whoever you want…I will admit I dislike rich classist assholes a whole lot…but I cannot actually prove they are baseline different from me or out to get me, so proof ain’t on my side either- and my dislike is prolly irrational on many levels….but at least I admit it. And they are not a majority….

In fact, I think if hardcore haters of any type said I hate men who sexually assault women, or women who cheat men, or violent gangsters, or racist asshats, or terrorists, or aggressive religious sorts, so on…no one would think of them as hardcore haters at all, but people who dislike violent lying hate and fear mongering jerkwads….

Y’all know the term, right? As in how it is used in a relationship sense….as in that “I cannot be in a relationship with someone if they (insert habit or whatever here), that’s a deal breaker.” Usually a term used for relationships of a romantic nature, but not excluded to, for instance a recovering alcoholic might really like Joe X, but Joe X likes to get his party on with the booze and thus, our theoretical recovering alcoholic cannot be around Joe that much because Joe kicks back by drinkin’….thus deal breaker on a friendship. These things, those deal breaker things? They exist for a reason. Boundaries and hardlines and shit like that? I tend to think those are good things that help in the protecting of ones self, sanity, and all that shit. Hell, I even got some myself, and yep, sure enough, they differ if stuff is on a friend level or a romantic level….for instance, I can be friends with a dude who takes longer to get ready to go out than I do and puts a whole, whole lotta stock in bein’…pretty or handsome or what the hell ever. Could I date a dude who spent more time gettin’ cleaned up and groomed to perfection than I do? Fuck no. Deal Breaker. Same goes for dudes with long nails, dudes who cannot change a tire, and dudes who figure women should be pretty nice smelling domestic goddesses and great hostesses 24/7/365. And beleive it or not, some of the same shit other folk consider deal breakers- as in the big huge common ones? I do too, but prolly to a lesser degree. I can be friends with, even romantically involved with folk who drink, smoke, use drugs, watch porn, gamble (vices), and I am the same way if they are folk who are more on the virtue end of it (go to church regular, do community service, so on)- where it would become a problem with me is if any or all of that was too excess, an actual addiction, an all-consuming thing…so yeah, I figure that shit out first before gettin’ any kind of relationship- just friends or more than friends, straightened out first- and really, its not a bad thing to do….

But where I see the problems coming in with this kinda shit is when people have those deal breakers, don’t shoot straight about it, and then figure they can change the other party. One, that shit never works, two, controlling as fuck, and three, kinda dishonest really. I mean, lets say, theoretically of course and all, a nice sincere hard working clean as soap don’t drink don’t smoke, don’t do any of that shit fella found himself having a serious liking of oh, a somewhat foul mouthed mean tempered non-conventional gal who likes booze, speed, smokes, porn and all kinds of nefarious shit, but rather than saying flat out “Hey, I like you, but the shit you do is a deal breaker for me” and instead makes no mention of it, gets into a relationship with said gal, then starts bringin’ down the hardline? Uh….boot! WHY? Because people are not “a cause” and the awesome power of anyones love ain’t gonna change folk, and well, I for one would not wanna be with someone who was a lying shit sack about it from the get go but figured once they got some hooks in me, they could then change me or the rules of engagement. It’s underhanded, devious and even IF (and yep, big IF), the person goes with this change of plan and agrees to the newly made deal breakers? Pfft….95% of the time they are lyin’ through their teeth and will still do all the shame shit behind the Rule Changers Back. If a clean-livin’ person gets into a relationship with a partier, and puts up with it until hooks are in and then changes the rules? Well, sure, because the Partier is now invested in a relationship they might not do it around their S.O….but as soon as that S.O. is outta sight? I bet ya fuckin’ pair of snake skin boots the Partier will get to partying. That’s who they are, what they dig, how they roll…and the only person who can-or even has a right to change that shit up- is them. Love don’t conquer all, and those who go in thinking it can? Not only prolly in for a nasty shock- but basing the relationship off some lies to start with. Folk shouldn’t say they are okay with crap they ain’t okay with in the first place, and changing up the rules? Hell, that’s just controlling manipulative bullshit. It can also lead folk gettin’ real angry and downright hateful towards the person who, oh, lied.

Anyway- been ill and got the insomnia in full effect- and that was what was on my mind this mornin’. Fire at Will…