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Thursday, 10 May 2012

I have realised something.

I thought about it and realised it was true and then I
thought about it a bit more in order to avoid doing anything else.

The thing which I have realised, which I will tell you about
in a moment right after showing you this picture:

What is it? I found it on my roof. It’s been there for a
while, but it wasn’t there before, like when I moved in. It’s from somewhere.
It looks like a bit of mud, but why is it that shape? And I would have thought
it would have disintegrated in the rain, but it hasn’t, it’s still there. It
hasn’t moved.

So maybe it is a bit of concrete, a concrete finger: A lithic-dactyl
if you will. But how did it get there? Did a bird bring it, did someone throw
it up? Has someone been in my garden in order to throw small phallic objects
onto my roof?

Anyhoo, I realised I am a bit of a procrastinator.

But in the days when I was imprisoned against my will (and
that life is never far away) I had a schedule, a routine. Yes it would involve repeatedly
hitting my head against a desk, but at least it was within a constructed
framework.

Now I am FREE!!! Woohoo and all that, but I have no order, I
have no timetable. But worse than that, the fundamental problem with my current
existence is that I have no one to rebel against.

So I am rebelling against me. And I don’t like it.

I’m setting myself deadlines and flouting them. I’m deciding
to have a nice lunch and then eating an entire packet of wine gums, because I
can. Because all you lot go can go crap in a bucket for all I care.

See! Rebellion. This rebellion must be crushed. AND CRUSHED
I SHALL BE!