"Nappy Hair"

I really have no energy to write an essay regarding the specifics
of parenting and social responsibility, two debates this Soapbox
touches upon. I just wanted to throw some thoughts out about
what I see wrong with parents these days. So please be lenient
in your interpretation and criticism. ;)

Did you hear about the teacher who was removed from her third grade
class because parents of students complained about her reading the
book Nappy Hair? The book, written by an African-American
professor, aims to make children with "nappy", or knotted and curly,
hair proud to have it, instead of being ashamed of it.

I don't think many people who read this will disagree with me when I say
that the parents are overreacting. Therefore, my aim isn't so much to
persuade anyone that what the parents did was out of line, but more to
describe what I see as foreboding about this whole debacle.

Alright, so let's begin by examining the parents' motivation for
complaining about the book. The class is made up mainly of Hispanic
and African-American students. The teacher is white. Perhaps some of
the parents considered it inappropriate that a white teacher chose to
identify with non-whites by using Nappy Hair. I can only
speculate -- all I've read are summarized newspaper articles. Why would
parents want their children identifying with their own cultures through
someone who isn't even a part of that culture?

Why should children discuss the word "nappy" and what it means in their
own lives? There should be no conflict in schools, only learning and
preparing children for higher learning. It isn't so much finding a way
to relate school to reality, some parents may think, but instead just
teaching them how to survive.

I don't know the true intentions of the teacher, but I can honestly say
that at face value, she should be lauded for trying to find ways to
identify with students she otherwise wouldn't be able to as well. She
brought in a book (which I must remind the offended parents is JUST a
book) which covered topics that these kids might've had to deal with
every day. Mary Had a Little Lamb, a book mentioned in
CNN's article, would not relate anywhere near as well. Like children
give a damn what happened to the stupid sheep, or to Little Miss Muffet,
or the cow and the cat and the moon and the spoon and the milking that
story has gotten through the years.

Alright, easy enough topic to take sides in, yeah? Okay, now let's
have some fun.

Teachers get enough shit as it is. It's not enough that teachers get
paid what amounts to less than dirt these days, as do other people who
perform civic duties like policemen and firemen -- teachers are also
labelled pedophiles if they even touch or pat students on their backs.
Touching, a natural form of communication, particularly used by humans
to express approval, is off-limits. Teachers are
forced to stay to a set curriculum, with little flexibility and little
rearranging of schedules to compensate for the actual flow of a class
over a semester. Rush rush rush, got to get the quizzes out so the
Board doesn't reprimand me... Teachers also are blamed for lack of
motivation in their students, as are they not allowed to try to give
their students enriching and rewarding lives by making them think.
There is virtually no incentive to teach to grade school kids beyond
the sheer motivation of the individual trying to become a teacher.
Society does not reward these people who have huge influences on
molding children at their early ages.

There aren't that many good teachers because they've been scared off.

At least university professors are given much more freedom to teach. :)
You only have to make it through twelve Hellish years of unfulfilling,
vapid grade school before you get there.

At the same time, mankind's colossal defeat over natural selection
means that the idiocy contingent is growing at astonishing rates.
Parents are becoming even more stupid with every passing day, and
there are more and more of them, as well as more and more children
for each of those families. They spread like bacteria.

Many parents, like the ones who protested this book, are so bewildered
with the mature task of raising and educating their own children that
they search for external factors to explain their kids' failures. It's
television, they say, or the Internet, or even books by Mark Twain and
Thomas Hardy. Heck, some groups fear Disney's proliferation of smut
is destroying their children's minds. Granted, much of this is only
found in the platforms of extremist religious groups, but it signals
a trend of parental stupidity nevertheless.

You've heard it all before. Parents are more and more detached from
their children than ever before, and children don't identify with their
parents, and the chain continues with the children's offspring. We
all live separate lives, and we have little in common. Parents don't
take time out for their kids, and they deny their children much needed
love and care. At the same time, they think they know what's best for
their children, so they don't think the kids need to learn about certain
things like sex and drugs and rock'n'roll. But the children learn anyway,
because the people they DO identify with are other children.

There is no reason to ban books. In my opinion, there's no reason to
stop children from seeing violent and graphic movies if the parents
consent. Having an age restriction unless parents are around is a
benign thing, I believe, but completely outlawing it is absurd. There
is an article at ABCNews.com regarding a children's media watchdog
group which is complaining about violence
in computer games. How insipid. Attempts to place society's ills
on media are a joke. Children are fucked up these days for dozens upon
dozens of reasons, but I'd say one of the chief reasons is the deflection
of responsibility by parents to provide interactive, inspiring, and
intelligent environments for their kids. Reading a book about Hester
Prynne getting knocked up by a priest does not lead to premarital sex,
nor does gibbing a Quake 2 monster into a wet vapor of blood lead to
murder and violent crime. Granted, some TV shows occasionally make you
want to do violent things, but that's only because they're so bad. :)
The point here is that it takes deeper emotions and problems to make
children indifferent to learning and to being socialized to fit into
society. It takes...like...a massive breakdown in one's moral fiber,
a relapse into complete demensia, and lack of remorse to become a
murderer...quite a far cry from what a video game can give you, believe
me. (and any game that COULD recreate that would be badass, but that's
another issue...)

Parents keep complaining about how schools are not staffing knowledgeable
and creative teachers, about how schools do not emphasize learning
anymore but are just meeting grounds for kids to have sex and to take
drugs, all while playing football. And then the same parents band
together to point out the exact books which are contributing to the
filth inside their children's minds, the rock music that rots brains
inside-out, and the teachers who are teaching their kids offensive
topics like evolution, sex education, and "nappy" hair.

Is this contradiction just not as obvious to everyone else as it
seems to me? What, parents, do you WANT? The parents are a major
source of the problem. It pains me to say that, since I'm one of
those defenders of media such as television and the Internet, an
advocate of letting parents have the choice of how to raise their
children. It's hard to say that when you have no confidence in
parents' abilities. It's hard to advocate parental choice when
parents are busy beating their children and sleeping with their
co-workers instead of their wives.

With the older generations, they retain the values and principles they
feel are most pure and worthy, and they scorn the younger cultures and
generations. They're antiquated, out-of-date. They're closed-minded,
and kids aren't going to put up with that. At the same time, children
these days are extremely cunning and intelligent. They gravitate towards
people who WILL let them think how they want, and unfortunately, those
"free-thinking" people are not exactly the best influences.

This is the way it has always been, even in the early days of mankind.
But what's dangerous about the rift between old people and young people
in TODAY'S age is that there are blatant contradictions in the rhetoric
of irresponsible parents and the clueless politicans who claim to
support the family. While in the past, kids couldn't identify with
their older relatives, now they're told they SHOULD learn, just not
learn about much of what they're interested in at young ages, like
sex and dating, sports and gaming. Children are expected to enjoy
Socrates, Emily Dickenson, and Christopher Columbus at an early age --
it's just not happening with this system. Kids on the whole aren't
really ready to appreciate it -- more tangible topics, like physical
appearance, should be explored to give children the sense of identity
and self-awareness they'll find crucial for their personalities as
they get older. This isn't to say children shouldn't have their
abilities pushed to the limits in order to expand their minds while
the paths in the brain are still flexible -- no -- indeed all I am
saying is that kids shouldn't be labelled abnormal for not appreciating
the finer authors and composers and artists at their age.

In short, parents suck. They can't do anything right. They find
scapegoats and refuse to take the blame -- meanwhile, kids like me,
and people I know, are growing up with full freedom to explore and
look at just about anything we want, and it doesn't make us any more
violent or extremist. In fact, having the freedom and the lack of
pressure to choose what I wanted to learn more about was probably
one of the main factors in my pursuit of becoming a well-rounded adult,
learned in everything from computers to literature to physical
activities. I think it's fair to say these parents are bogus.

Telling children about nappy hair is not promoting stereotypes or
racism, it's showing children that they're normal at a point in their
lives when they're struggling to match up against other children.
Parents continue to censor and "protect" their children from offensive
material, but it causes more harm than good, simply because children
are by their nature going to rebel against what they don't want to do.

Let the teachers teach, and give teachers incentive to teach. Don't
punish teachers ANY fucking time they try to help, and then chastise
them for NOT trying to help. Let information be free, let children
be free to learn what they want, given responsible parental supervision.
It was Socrates who expressed concern over people basing their views
of the world on utter ignorance, and who encouraged those people
to reevaluate their philosophies and come to logical conclusions.

Parents, emotionally childish as they are, do neither of these, and
therefore they are afraid of their children's educations with a
passion. They are scared that any slightest thing will trigger something
to snap inside their children, and they are unaware that it is not
learning and information which cause destructive behavior.

The offended parents are afraid of teaching Nappy Hair
because they do not understand what it means for children, nor did
they even take the time to read the book through to ascertain its
overall goal. Is it any wonder our whole school system is failing
miserably, when everyone is afraid to actually receive an education?

Considering how things could have turned out for me, I'm extremely
grateful towards my parents and my teachers for allowing me to develop
the way I have. By the time I got to UT Austin, I was taught how to
think rationally through various perspectives, and I believe I've been
thoroughly enriched through my two and a half years there, because of
the excellent curriculums and professors I've had the privilege of taking.

Doesn't it simplify things and put them in perspective when you consider
that fear is the only thing holding mankind back? How much could
we accomplish as a whole if we were to boldly charge into the unknown
instead of pussyfooting around it for decades upon decades?

I'm sorry to say, as a practical kind of guy, that this will never
happen -- it's human nature to fear what we aren't familiar with.
What that says about our future as a race is a stunning thing indeed.

And I'm also stunned to think what's going to happen to me -- I'm not
sure my book deal will go through now. =) That's too bad, because I'd
really love to see my books, Big Nose, Slanted
Eyes, and the titles with less racial overtones, Floppy
Ears and Super-Long Tongue go to paperback. Gimme
a chance to argue with those people after they've banned my books from
their school district! Lemme at 'em, the irresponsible, censoring
bastards!