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I think you just need to take off the access panel from the front of your water heater and turn up the temperature so it's hotter. For Energy Star a lot of them ship with a lower then optimal temp so that they save energy. I turned mine up to 180ºF I think. You just use a tiny screw driver and just turn it up little bits at a time till it's as hot as you want. Give it at least an hour before testing, and keep in mind if you have kids you don't want it SUPER hot. I'll most likely turn mine down once I have kids.

Well if your sink is fine then it's probably just the length of your showers vs the size of the water tank. But if your sink/kitchen temp doesn't feel hot enough then I would also adjust the temp on the water heater.

Well that's normal for it to be cold when you first turn it on. You have to imagine the water leaving the tank and traveling all the way to the shower head. That entire distance is cold water that's been sitting in the pipes. This is also why it would be colder in the AM.