Following a rather heavy evening at the Raffles club, where I consumed over 60 units of alcohol, I stayed at the Piccadilly apartment of my parents-in-law. Unfortunately, I committed the following
unfortunate acts -

1. Sat on, and killed their budgerigar by mistake.

2. Smashed a 19th century vase.

3. Urinated in the microwave and caused it to explode when I switched it on.

4. Sold their Bang and Olufsen sound system to a Turkish mind reader.

5. Accidentally destroyed their baby grand piano by throwing a wardrobe on it (I thought it was on fire).

6. Finally, made the housekeeper quit her job after I vomited on her 5 year old son.

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Comments

This is quite an overwhelming amount of damage you caused last night. Sadly, there is nothing to be done about it. You will just have to move forward and act as your former charming self and hope to get back into their good graces.