"See, no one’s trying to redefine the waffle here — just improve it," UD writes. "So they fashioned some perfectly hand-holdable Belgian-style ones and injected some flavor (like sugar, chocolate chip, cinnamon and straight-up bacon). Then they added enough caffeine for three cups of coffee. The result: a Frankenwaffle that endows its eater with the power of 10 men. (Or at least the power of forming full sentences before 9am.)"