The notoriously prolific and unstable tweeter Courtney Love went on a rant accusing former Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl of hitting on and sleeping with her 19-year-old daughter, Frances Bean Cobain. And now she's being called out on her bullshit. Grohl has already denied the charge, but Frances has just released a sharp statement of her own repudiating her mother's claim and delivering the ultimate diss.

While I'm generally silent on the affairs of my biological mother, her recent tirade has taken a gross turn. I have never been approached by Dave Grohl in more than a platonic way. I'm in a monogamous relationship and very happy.

Twitter should ban my mother.

Gross is right, and the "biological mother" dig cuts like a knife. Being forced by your mother to publicly speak about who you are or are not sleeping with is grounds for disowning said mother. Frankly, Frances deserves some sort of medal for turning out as a functional human being, but maybe a lifetime Twitter ban for Courtney is the next best thing.

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Phew. Even though he alluded to leaving NBC yesterday, it looks like maybe Alec Baldwin isn't leaving 30 Rock after all. Tina Fey was on The View and said,

As far as I know, he's not leaving the show. We're all in this together 'til the end. I think that he just maybe means that the end of the show — we're in six years — that the end of the show is visible on the horizon. We're all still on the show.

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Oh, great, Alec's not leaving—the whole show is leaving. Goddamn you, the future. You are a miserable place. [HuffPo]

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President Obama once rightfully called Kanye West a jackass after he interrupted Taylor Swift's acceptance speech at the 2009 VMAs. Well, he hasn't changed his mind in the interim. When asked if he prefers Jay-Z or Kanye, Obama smiled and said, "Jay-Z, although I like Kanye. He's a Chicago guy. Smart. He's very talented." But then he was reminded about his previous jackass comment, and he said, "He is a jackass. But he's talented." Can't fault a man for being honest. [E!]

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Remember back when Angelina Jolie was married to Billy Bob Thornton. 'Twas a different time. One that their wedding photographer Lesley Schaefers can't seem to move past. She took pictures of the couple as they got married at the Little Church of the West in Las Vegas and also served as their maid of honor. Now she's "going public" with new details, which are Zzzzzz. First, she said, "There was a lot of lust between them! They were like a couple of teenagers. I told them to get a room!" NO WAY. She also said Ange was "laughing out loud" while she posed for photos. Lesley recalls, "I got the greatest smile out of both of them. Billy Bob's a big smiler. He was really happy. It was as if Angelina had swept him off his feet." Scandalous, I say. And you'll never guess what they did after they were officially man and wife: "They started hugging each other. They couldn't believe that they were married!" Finally, with the revelation of these amazing details, your life is complete. [InTouch]

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Scarlett Johansson says she's still not quite over her 2010 divorce from Ryan Reynolds. Even though she admits it was "comically amicable," she says it was still "horrible . . . Of course it's horrible. It was devastating. It really throws you. You think that your life is going to be one way, and then, for various reasons or whatever, it doesn't work out." She also reveals that she and Sean Penn were dating after all, though they didn't give it an official term: "I never put a title on it, really, but we were seeing each other." But enough about ScarJo, how's your love life going? Are you over your divorce? Were you really dating that famous dude? Do tell. [Us]

Umm, holy shit. This picture of Brad Pitt from high school is about as perfect an object as exists in the world. Every child in America should be given that haircut. [Us]

Even though it seems to not be humanly possible, Jessica Simpson is still pregnant. And, according to her hairstylist Ken Paves, "This is so perfect for her. She's just loving this moment now." Yes, but won't someone tell us when is this moment going to end? [Us]

After reports surfaced yesterday that Britney Spears was going to get a 12 or so million dollar payment to be a judge on The X Factor, she's spoken out to say that it's not a done deal: "Things may not be as advanced as everyone is assuming; these things take along time. Anything can happen." Hmm. Let the games begin. [x17]

Joel McHale has explained his take on the Chevy Chase-Dan HarmonCommunity feud:

It was over voicemails, so there's been some recorded messages from Chevy. And now people are like, "Do you think they're true?" And as I've said before, we said it on The Soup, it's impossible because there's no way Chevy could figure out voicemail. He hibernates for nine months out of the year, and when you wake someone up, they're very disoriented and a lot of the time they don't know what they're saying.

He did add that he doesn't mind the whole thing because its "keeping us in the news." [E!]

It turns out the 3D version of Titanic that's being shown in China was edited so that during the scene where Kate Winslet's bare breasts are shown, you can only see her from the neck up. Why? Well, according to the State Administration of Radio, Film and Television, "Considering the vivid 3D effects, we fear that viewers may reach out their hands for a touch and thus interrupt other people's viewing." Ahh, the joys of censorship. [MSNBC]

Morgan Freeman is insisting that he's not marrying—or even dating—his 27-year-old step-granddaughter E'Dena Hines. He says,

"The recent reports of any pending marriage or romantic relationship of me to anyone are defamatory fabrications from the tabloid media designed to sell papers. What is even more alarming is that these fabrications are now being picked up by the legitimate press as well.

E'Dena has also said there's no truth to the rumors. That's a blessed relief. Of course, next thing we know Morgan Freeman will probably be dating Frances Bean Cobain and E'Dena and Dave Grohl will be eloping. [TMZ]

Wardrobes seem to do nothing but malfunction these days. The latest incident: Miley Cyrus went shopping and accidentally showed off a fair amount of sideboob. Ho hum. [E!]

The latest interpretation of why Peter Facinelli and Jennie Garth's marriage didn't work out—as if we needed to parse this further—is that Jennie couldn't handle the fact that Facinelli was getting more famous than she was. Says a surely deeply insightful source, "Her career hit a standstill, and she became resentful." Oy. [Us]

Grazia magazine made the very weird decision to photoshop one, but not all, of Megan Fox's tattoos off her back for her cover photo. [Hollywood Life]

Uh oh. Get ready for your teenage heart to break. Nick Lachey has put the rumors of a 98 Degrees tour this summer to death. He tweeted this morning, "So psyched to see all the excitement for a 98 Degrees tour, but the only tour I'll be doing this summer is at Babies 'R' Us!" Damn babies. They ruin everything. [Us]

In a strange collision of reality and fiction, Aaron Paul, who plays a serious criminal on Breaking Bad, has complained about the crime in Albuquerque, where they're filming the show. His apartment and car were both robbed. Better call Saul! [AP]

These are either seven best words you'll read today or the name of a terrible jam band: Kim and Khloe Kardashian Road Rage Incident. [TMZ]