Am I My Friend's Mistress?

Is Your Best Friend Cheating On His Wife With You?

Friday arrives and you've done all the planning — around his schedule. When can he get away from work and family responsibilities and sneak away to meet you at the nearest bar for that first round? When he arrives, the preamble is usually the same. “Don’t let my wife know how much trouble we get into tonight… and she for sure cannot know that I smoked tonight,” says good ol’ Bob. And with that, the stage is now officially set for a night of mild debauchery that will stay between you and him and will never be spoken of at the next wedding or birthday dinner. You wince a little at the feeling, but you miss your old friend and so you indulge him. Bring on the first round.

Of course, after a few drinks and a great cut of meat, you will get a few standard conversations tossed your way that add to that gnawing feeling that you are a secret… a repository for forbidden topics and stress release. Bob begins to vent about the pressures of family, the lack of sex in his life and the incredible envy he has for your freedom. “You have no idea how lucky you are,” he repeats. But he’s not unhappy; he’s nostalgic. You are his time machine, taking him back to a place where the next round always had the word “shots” in it and trading stories about sexual conquests was 50% of an evening's banter.

Bob isn’t taking advantage of you. He’s your friend, and he needs this from you. It’s not his fault you still play PS3 all day Saturday as you work your way up to another big night. He’s moved on. But these nights are his way of holding onto it a little, and you don’t mind feeling like a rock star when he looks at your weekends with mild jealousy. You’re not just his mistress — you’re actually helping his marriage. Better he be out with you unloading than looking for other forms of release. But what happens the morning after?