Pages

Sunday, October 28, 2012

WHAT'S WITH THIS "DON'T JUDGE ME"?

Giving Dawah is tough, particularly with each passing day. Somehow, everyday, I come across something flashing 'DON'T JUDGE ME". At first, I thought it was fair enough (at least in some cases), but lately this 'Don't Judge Me' phenomenon has gripped almost all Muslims.

I've tweeted quite a lot about correcting our Hijab on Twitter, and almost each time, I get a reply tweet from a sister/brother saying 'You have no right to judge us, only Allah does'. Of course I agree with it, I've no right to judge anyone and Allah is the only Judge, but it's your duty and mine to tell others about what's right and wrong. And when I try to get this explained... well the results are just not satisfactory.

Allah says ''So admonish/remind them that maybe the reminder will be of benefit and as for him who fears Allah he will be reminded but as for the wretched one he will turn away'' [Quran 87:9-11]

"You are the best nation amongst mankind because you command the good (Islam), you forbid evil (sins), and you believe in Allah [ Surat Al 'Imran, 110]

Prophet Muhammad (sallalhu alaihi wasallam) said "If you see a munkar (unislamic act), you change it with your hand; and if you cannot do that, then change it with your mouth (speak out against it); and if you cannot do that, then forbid it in your heart; and that is the least of belief."

So you see, enjoining good, encouraging others towards good and advising them against going in the wrong path is the duty of a Muslim. In Dawah, no one is judging no one. We just want to correct the mistakes.

I've mostly seen this 'Don't Judge Me' paranoia with regard to the Hijab. For example, if you quote this Hadith "There will be women who will be dressed but they will be naked. Their heads will be like the humps of camels. They will not enter Jannah and will not even smell the scent of Jannah while it can be smelt from a far distance.'' [Sahih Muslim] to enlighten Muslim women about the recent "Camel-Hump Hijab Style", they naturally bring on the 'Don't Judge Me' talk. If we know a sin, and don't prevent others from doing it, we are all responsible of answering to Allah- the real Judge- on the Day of Judgement.

And again, advising sisters not to adorn their Hijab, wear tight-fitting clothes, cake their faces with 5 layers of make-up and stop interacting with non-mahrams, is almost always sure to end up with a barrage of 'Don't Judge Me's". They say that maybe they wear that way, but they may be closer to Allah than us. Of course I agree with that. We're not talking about the level of closeness of that person to Allah. What we're trying to correct is their way of wearing the Hijab. We can't cut through someone's heart to see their level of Imaan but just remember this: If you have real Imaan, you'd want to dress the way Allah wants you to. You'd wear the proper Hijab and maintain that Hijab throughout your life.

If saying 'Dont Judge Me' is your way of expressing "If I commit a sin, it is between me and my God; so stay out of my business!", then may Allah guide you. If Islam asks us to encourage good and forbid evil and do Dawah, it sure is going to be difficult if everyone is going to say 'Don't Judge Me'.

There are some instances where you have to say 'Don't judge me', as in when someone tries to judge your actions rather than your intentions, but there's a way of saying it. For example, even if it's Dawah, you shouldn't go about a person who hasn't yet prayed his/her Asr prayers and tell them, "You didn't pray Asr yet? What kind of Muslim are you?" or somewhere along that line. Rather, you should make them feel comfortable with your Dawah by saying, "I'm going to pray my Asr Salah. You want to join me?" That's Dawah, and that's what will help our Muslims everywhere.

Some people say that the Islam is in the hearts, not in the beard or Hijab. What they clearly fail to understand is that when Islam is in the heart, the Hijab and beard follow automatically.

I'm sorry if what I've said has hurt anyone in any way, but honestly, I've tried to ignore all this 'Don't judge me's". Yet, after seeing this trend picking up faster and faster, I thought it's best if I addressed it now, so that hopefully In Sha Allah, we'd have more Muslims accepting their mistakes and correcting it rather than saying 'Don't judge me' and continuing with that sin.

10 comments:

May Alllah (swt) shower His blessings upon you my sister, everything you have just wrote is what I also think on a daily basis, its difficult advising our fellow sisters, even though it is an obligation upon each and every one of to do so. I often read about how if anyone had told one of the Sahaba (ra) to fear Allah they would well up with tears and immediately turn to Allah in submission, these days advising someone leads to sisters turning against one another in anger. I don't know the answer sister all I know is that I benefit so much from your reminders and love you dearly for the sake of Allah.

Ameen to your beautiful Dua sis. I agree- about 10 years back, people are ready to listen to your advice but now it's just so different. May Allah help all of us!Alhamdulillah, I love you for the sake of Allah too sis. May the One for whom you love me, love you too! Ameen :D

assalamualaikum wa rahmatulahi wa barakatu sisterSO HAPPY YOU WROTE THIS POSTMAY ALLAH REWARD YOU FOR THIS BECAUSE I AGREE 10100191029019201830394092389042839048239042381708701274% with everything you wrote. Our duty as a believing Muslim is to enjoin the maroof and forbid munkar ....if someone is wearing the hijab the wrong way as Allah did NOT prescribe it...than we are simply reminding our dear sister because we care about them for the sake of Allah. SO MANY SISTERS these days get into defense mode and start "hating" and always mention " you dont know whats in my heart so dont judge me blah blah blah blah blah" *music notes coming out of their mouths* ...well i'd like to tell those sisters... actions are based on intentions and intentions are governed by actions. A murderer will not say "oh i killed that man but deep in my heart i really love him" ..or a thief does not steal and say " oh well i didnt plan on stealing but i just did it" ....those sisters need to fear Allah and check themselves. I mean, this is also a good reminder for us as well.. May Allah guide us all and this weak dying Ummah AMEEN!! GREAT POST MASHA'ALLAH!

I remember that the things my aunt used to tell me are among the main reasons why I turned from an ordinary born Muslim into a Muslim who's fully convinced of her Islam and is trying to become better in sha Allah.

She spoke with me about things I didn't know much about, she was a Niqabi who adviced me to wear the Hijab when I wasn't feeling it, she reminded me of Salah growing up until I got disciplined.

At times when I was a teenager I would get annoyed at her comments and dawah but now I'm yearning to hear advice and dawah from others all the time.

People are refraining from giving dawah to each other because of these reactions and this whole 'Mind your own business' culture in our communities.

For those of you who are strong enough to give dawah still please continue, we need to hear from you. For those of you who don't want to hear criticism or advice from others I say receiving dawah is a blessing from Allah so be happy when he sends you someone to be a remind and a reason for you to become closer to Allah maybe!

Wa'alaykum salaam warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu sis! I agree completely with you because I've felt just the same way as you have. Attending Madrasa, listening to Islamic lectures and Dawah has really changed me as a Muslim Alhamdulillah. Dawah can change us a lot!

Jazakallah for your comment sis, it really gives me all the more encouragement to continue what I'm doing with Allah's continuous Help, Alhamdulillah! May Allah bless you always :)

there are always people who carry the banner that says "just because I do not wear hijab, it doesn't mean that my eeman is not at the highest level", or the stylish hijabi will always say "well, at least I cover my hair".. or "don't judge me, just because I dress this way doesn't mean that I am not a good muslimah". My reply to these statements, yes, you may be better than I ever am, but, remember, one who fear her Creator, would do as told. If you are a good muslim, you would obey whatever rules and guidelines there is.

You're right sis, that's exactly what a good Muslim would do- obey Allah and the rule and guidelines prescribed by Him. I do hope they learn to accept their mistakes and correct it, In sha Allah. May Allah guide them and us!

Jazakillahu khair for writing this sis. It needs to be said. Can I suggest a little correction? You said in the third paragraph from the bottom 'Don't judge me', as in when someone tries to judge your actions rather than your intentions, but there's a way of saying it.' I was confused by this as we can only judge by actions and not intentions. Did you mean to say it other way around, 'when someone tries to judge your intentions rather than your actions? Fi amanillah