Others have already recommended that your son also retain a lawyer. Especially, if the lawyer is recommending that the IRA be distributed and placing assets in a minor's name. Your son needs his own council.

Divorce proceedings allow for an IRA to be split/transferred between a husband and wife without 'distributing' the funds which would incur taxes and penalties. It requires a court order for the IRA administrator to process the change and it is not immediate. I am not aware of the rules concerning a child.