Final Score: 6.89

Summary:

The Haunted Hospital is an old-school style haunt that takes place in an old (and very creepy), authentic, single-story hospital building. It looks like this is their 9th season and, up until last weekend, we had never been lucky enough to find the time to visit them. We honestly didn’t think we had time to squeeze them in this year either, but it turns out that the October stars were perfectly aligned on this particular night, which allowed us to stop in since we were nearby. For full disclosure, it was their second night open for the season and we did show up an hour before closing time.

We must say, the building this takes place in is a haunter’s dream! Long hallways, actual paint peeling off the walls… the place just has an overall “something is watching you” feeling to it. This could be due to the fact that the building is also said to be truly haunted!

Three attractions are located within the building: The flagship Haunted Hospital, a miniature (4-room) escape room called “Atropos” and, lastly, a smaller haunt called “Slitz and Giggles’ Funhouse.” If you find yourself in the Scottsville area of South-Central Kentucky this haunt season, then you may consider paying this haunt a visit!

Cast: 6.36

Naturally, we came across a lot of crazed patients and doctors within the Hospital. Though, we did find a few other random characters along the way too, such as the mean piggie and a clown-masked chainsaw attacker. We noticed a dozen or so actors throughout the haunt and, even though it’s a very short haunt, several of them were clustered together, which left a lot of lengthy dead spaces where no actors were found for quite some time.

Some of the most interactive characters of our visit included the sushi-serving surgeon and the little girl who called our name out to the rest of the house; lots of mocking and personalized threats followed soon after, of course. Aside from that, most of the actors’ dialogue was fairly traditional. We heard their version of the classic “1… 2… Freddy’s coming for you” jingle (even though there was no Freddy), “wanna play,” “here they come” and some other commonly-used phrases.

Perhaps the most energetic performance of the night goes to the one who came running after us in the cage maze. He had us legitimately wanting to run from him! No cast members were present in Atropos, but a few clowns and carnival-related characters were found in the Funhouse. Each of them interacted with us well and had some crafty ways of mixing comedy in with their scares.

On a side note, we’re pretty sure the actors here are allowed to touch you, but only about 3 of them took advantage of the opportunity. Another actor outside the haunt “made friends” with one of our group members while they were in the porta potty, so NEVER let your guard down with these guys!

Costuming: 7

As would be expected from a haunted hospital, patient gowns and lab coats were aplenty throughout this dilapidated building. Also, since copious amounts of blood are readily available, some of them have been doused with plenty of this crimson-colored bodily fluid too. One of the nurses actually seemed to have the most detailed outfit of our visit. In the Funhouse, the clowns were wearing appropriate, yet simple harlequin clothing with matching makeup.

Aside from the typical triage attire, we did find a few wardrobe selections that seemed a bit odd for a hospital setting. Among those was the young girl that we saw wearing a fancy white dress, but it did work to give her a very “haunting” appearance as she came in and out of the darkness. One particular assailant was sporting a nice mohawk and the “piggie” was devoid of any obvious medical attire from what we could see. Though his swine-shaped mask did seem to be of good quality, it also seemed to muffle his voice quite a bit, too. We did notice a couple of neon-glowing masks that we don’t see very often at other attractions, so that was pretty unique.

Customer Service: 7.94

Finding the Haunted Hospital was pretty much a no-brainer. Our GPS took us right there and a sign for the haunt was in place out by the main road. Yet another banner sat waiting for us at the top of the hill that exclaimed “Turn Right!” once we got close enough (or maybe it just had an arrow). Plenty of free, well-lit parking is available and portable restrooms are located on either side of the building, which is conveniently the entrance and exit points.

The ticket booth / concession stand is located inside the front wall of the building and, under the window, you can find their ticket prices and which haunts are included with each option that is offered. Friendly and helpful staff members can be found there as well, in addition to their stations at the beginning of each attraction.

One of the biggest signs we saw first was that for the Atropos mini escape room. However, the lady at the ticket booth informed us that most guests typically go through the Hospital haunt first. Its entrance wasn’t blatantly obvious to us first-timers to this haunt, but she was kind enough to point us in the right direction… which, ironically, was around the left side of the building. Popular music could be heard near the waiting line and a single queue entertainer had some fun with one of our group members before we got started.

Some interesting passageways are waiting for you here! At several points during our tour, we were made to walk over grating, duck through small doors, careen through a coffin and slither over side-shifting floors! Be sure to wear sturdy footwear, as grating has been known to eat stilettos on more than one occasion. Despite a few harrowing thresholds, our journey through the haunt was a relatively safe one.

Atmosphere: 7.17

The Hospital’s building is pretty big and only about half of it is decorated for the haunted house. On one side, you’ve got banners, the ticket booth, queue line barriers and music, while the other side is comparatively barren. But, the blacked out windows and lack of sufficient lighting around this actual, former hospital building lends it an authentic, abandoned, exceptionally creepy and truly “haunting” appearance. Needless to say, we didn’t spend much time on that side of the complex.

As we waited our turn to enter, we could hear two of the actresses inside singing their own version of a familiar horror movie jingle (the one from Nightmare on Elm Street that we mentioned above). Though it ended up being a bit more comical to us than scary, it was still entertaining and we even jumped in and started singing with them once we started our tour. Things did get a bit ‘darker,’ though, when we heard, “5… 6… better not get sick. 7… 8… it’s a bit too late!”

Special Effects: 6.63

Hands down, the most impressive special effect at the Hospital is their building. Along with having a creepy exterior, the inside is covered in its own layer of age, filth, peeling paint and, of course, blood stains from the staff’s primitive experiments! Dim lighting in their spacious rooms adds to the “abandoned” feel of the place, giving you the feeling that anything could be lurking within the shadows and darkness. Honestly, if there were a bunch more props and random stuff packed into each of the rooms, it may even serve as a detriment to that effect. It almost dips into the “paranormal investigation” type of setting and, with claims that the building may be truly haunted, there’s an inescapable tension about the place that’s just plain awesome and something you’ll need to experience first hand.

With that said, most of the rooms utilize actual hospital beds, gurneys and medical equipment and some of them are complete with gory, dismembered bodies! Some of the most unique effects we saw include the grated walkway that actually takes you outside (and high above the ground) and an open casket that you must pass through to continue on to the next room. Other effects include bubbles that fall from the ceiling, a cage maze, strobe lights, fog, a head-banging elderly couple, tilting floors, custom music (in some spots) and even some scents! Atropos included a small selection of interactive props and hidden passageways and, finally, the Funhouse also had music, an unsuspecting window illusion, squishy floors, and loud bells and sirens.

As hinted earlier, though, many of the rooms and hallways are pretty spacious and don’t have “a lot” of stuff packed into them, and most of what we saw was fairly traditional; not quite up to the caliber of some other haunts within driving distance. However, pretty much everything that you’ll see has been customized in one way or another so that it’s unique to The Haunted Hospital. Also, the haunt is very quiet for the most part, except for the voices of actors, so there aren’t a lot of pre-recorded sounds to be heard filling the air during the tour. But, the silence also adds to the “abandoned” feeling mentioned above.

Theme: 7.7

A specific theme was never explained to us during our visit, but considering the haunt’s name and given the fact that several actors were wearing medical attire, we pretty much assumed we were getting ready to enter a hospital. We are unsure of whether the haunt has a story that they’re following or trying to embrace, but if they did, it was not made apparent to us during our walk through any of the haunts. Though, we did pick up on a few subtle remarks, like “don’t get sick” and “it’s too late.” The Atropos escape room is set in several rooms of a typical home, including a living room, kitchen and laundry room and the Funhouse is strongly clown- and carnival-themed.

Fright Effect: 6.29

Although there was only two of us in our group during our hospital stay, they made sure they targeted both of us instead of always going after the one up front, the one in the back or just the female of the group. Taunting vocalizations seemed to be the main ingredient to their fright stew. We should know by now not to tell lively children our names when asked… but, alas, she twisted our arms and held us at gunpoint, so we didn’t have much choice… or maybe one of us just ratted the other one out since the opportunity presented itself! Either way, we later regretted it as they called to us from many of the ensuing dark rooms and long, echoing hallways. (By the way, she didn’t really hold us at gunpoint, but she was awfully persistent about it)

We also came across a few intense actors, a startling illusion, several well-placed hiding spots, intimidating stares and a realistic fresh kill performed right before our eyes! Poor girl.

The finale consisted of an aggressor who had just finished chasing the group in front of us. He was completely unaware of our presence and lifted his mask up and all. The bad part was, without even bothering to get back into character, he opened the exit gate for us and told us to have a good night. We thought “Surely, this isn’t it…” as we made our quiet stroll back to the front of the building. Indeed, it was the end and nothing else came after us.

Value: 6.05

General admission for just the Haunted Hospital is $20.00. They also offer a Panic Pass that gives you access to the Hospital plus their two new attractions: “Stiltz and Giggles Funhouse” and “Atropos” for $25.00. Because the combo ticket was only $5.00 more for two additional attractions, it was a no-brainer for us connoisseurs of all things spooky and Halloween-related to take this route.

After going through the Hospital and realizing it only lasted about 10 minutes, we were glad we went ahead and paid for the extra attractions. However, touring the Funhouse and Atropos only added around 6 minutes to our total “haunt time,” which brings them to a total of 16 minutes. Their MPD (minutes of entertainment per dollar spent) score of 0.64 is quite a bit lower than the average of 1.5 that we see most often during our travels. Granted, they aren’t in an area with a lot of other attractions to directly compete with, but our personal opinions are that we still felt like we left without getting a full $25 worth of a trip through this attraction. The potential is definitely there and, with taking opening weekend into consideration, we are sure that the crew behind this maddening medical facility can still put on one heck of a show! They have an awesome building, a decent-sized cast and we could also tell they have the passion for haunting. They just weren’t all quite “on point” on the night of our visit.

If you are looking for a haunt located in an authentic building that is possibly truly haunted by more than just cast members, then The Haunted Hospital is a spooky place to visit! And don’t forget… “Your bed is waiting!”