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Confused. Is dating someone else or?

November 4th, 2018, 06:39 AM

Hi,
Iím new here so I thought Iíd give this a try. I recently went on a couple of dates with a guy who was seven years my senior so Iím a 34 year old female. First date went well and I ended up having sex with him four times on the first date. Following this we continued to text but I started to notice that his focus became more and more about whether I orgasm. I openly told him on the first date that I would not until I was comfortable but he thought that by the second date I should feel comfortable enough to orgasm with him which I wasnít. I want to know is he seeing someone else? The reason why I ask this is that my orgasming hadnít been such an issue until the second date and I found a bottle of womenís foundation in his bathroom. Also, is it common for women to orgasm so soon with a guy?

This guy is definately a player. Yes he's dating other women. He found you easy as you slept with him multiple times on the FIRST date. Respectable women don't do that. Whats the problem with having an orgasm ANYTIME you have sex? That's what it's all about isn't it?

I say it as I see it. Don't take it personally!

Comment

Sorry just going over my original post again. So what I want to know is do most women orgasm to make their partners happy? Is it ok that sex and intimacy can be enjoyed without the orgasm? What made me wonder whether he was seeing other women was that all of a sudden my not being comfortable to orgasm with him was a real problem. That some other woman heís seeing is competing with me or trying to make me look bad like I donít care about him or his feelings if I donít orgasm. I was of the impression that perhaps sex is about building trust and I wondered if any other women orgasm to keep a man?

Comment

Wow, too much of a big deal is being made out of this. No, women don't orgasm just to make men happy and to keep them. I don't know any woman that does this. It's nothing to do with that. You talk about sex being about building trust but you had sex with him multiple times on the first date. He now see's you as easy. Some Men like to think they are studs and some men get their thrills if they know they are satisfying women. Some men LIKE to make sure they pleasure women, but this guy of yours is just weird about it. YOU'RE being weird about it also.

I say it as I see it. Don't take it personally!

1 like

Comment

Hi,
Iím new here so I thought Iíd give this a try. I recently went on a couple of dates with a guy who was seven years my senior so Iím a 34 year old female. First date went well and I ended up having sex with him four times on the first date. Following this we continued to text but I started to notice that his focus became more and more about whether I orgasm. I openly told him on the first date that I would not until I was comfortable but he thought that by the second date I should feel comfortable enough to orgasm with him which I wasnít. I want to know is he seeing someone else? The reason why I ask this is that my orgasming hadnít been such an issue until the second date and I found a bottle of womenís foundation in his bathroom. Also, is it common for women to orgasm so soon with a guy?

Thanks for the help.

He is not dating you so who cares if he is dating another?

You discussed sex with him on the first date so clearly the only intention was to have sex. And you willingly agreed.
What do you mean by you had sex four times? He blew four times? So you count sex based on orgasms? In that case wouldnít you say you didnít have sex at all? Since you clearly didnít?

I suspect he recently had a nasty break up whereby his ex said she never orgasmed and he is out to prove his manlihood , anyone will do as long as he gets it on first meet. He is not interested in dating , just out there to prove his ex wrong.

1 like

Comment

OP, you had sex FOUR TIMES on your first date? Why? Were you pent up from sexual frustration /haven't been laid in awhile or ?? This makes no sense to me. Of course, you're completely obliged to do whatever you please and have sex as many times with as many people as you want. That's your sexual and personal freedom that no one should control. However I really have to ask why you engaged with a man sexually four times in the first date and then now wonder why he's behaving like a total fucking creep or overly focused about your orgasmic abilities.

To answer your question, it depends on the woman and whatever headspace she is in. If you're looking for a graph or spreadsheet on the demographic of women and #s of orgasms spread out for ie. over various ages or over geographic location, I don't have it for you. Maybe you can compile one yourself.

If you want my personal opinion, you seem like a nice gal and you went along with something that initially felt good. This guy took advantage of your naivete and basically used you for sex. When you realized his behaviour was off, you started to see his real colours. He can keep anyone's foundation if he wants. He may even be a cross dresser in his free time. You don't know that because you didn't take the time to get to know him. If you're getting the heebie jeebies, do not see him again and move on with your life.