Satellite Beach, Indian Harbour Beach residents hope for a solution for the raw sewage in the Indian River Lagoon issue. It happens during storms and sewage breaks. Video posted March 15, 2018, by Malcolm Denemark, FLORIDA TODAY

Buy Photo

Scott Hoffman of Satellite Beach discusses the sewage situation, from Oars & Paddles Park in Indian Harbour Beach at sunset. He and his fellow paddlers have been concerned about the sewage discharged into the Indian River Lagoon system during and after Hurricane Irma.(Photo: TIM SHORTT/FLORIDA TODAY)Buy Photo

Instead of talking about volleyball tournaments, surfing festivals and recreational paddling, the Satellite Beach newspaper, the Beachcaster, recently devoted its front page to sewage improvements and boil water guidance. I guess when you live in a third world county — “Brown River County” — that’s what you do.

The sewage story is the case of the three monkeys: See nothing, say nothing and do nothing.

“See nothing” is the Brevard Utilities department. They think the problem is that “people in Satellite Beach take too many showers.” They crafted a 10-year $134 million plan that makes their job easier by fixing all of the high pressure pipes and lift stations, but does not address the 60-year-old failed gravity pipes which are leaking sewage into our ground water and forcing raw sewage release during major storms.

“Say nothing” is the Save Our Lagoon Committee, which doesn’t believe that 17 raw sewage spills in 2017, totaling over 35 million gallons is a problem. Instead, they champion dredging, which may not improve conditions for 20 to 30 years. Why aren’t they outraged? They think “we” are after committee money — so much for being concerned scientists. There is plenty of bond money outside of the half-cent tax to address sewage infrastructure and improper releases — they should be ashamed.

“Do nothing” is the county and state government. If the Department of Environmental Protection's fine for a 25 million-gallon sewage spill is only $13,700 why do anything?

“Pump baby pump:" just keep pumping sewage into the lagoon. Save our Lagoon and the DEP say the sewage is “gross” but claim it’s not harming the environment, so I should stop complaining. Meanwhile those who should have a conscience, such as Curt Smith and his fellow county commissioners, are busy claiming credit for plans already in place that do nothing or just absent from the problem.

The Save Our Lagoon ordinance was a brilliant document that addressed sewage, septic, stormwater and muck. It recognizes that storm-related sewage releases are tied to the broken sewage pipes. This, coupled with inadequate storm water management, leads to the system being overwhelmed.

I invite the three monkeys to swim from the Eau Gallie Yacht Club dock or Oar and Paddles IHB City Park dock. I dare them.

What do I suggest?

• Testing of the rivers and canals by an independent lab. We, the taxpayers, must know how bad it is and if we are helping or hurting.

• Lining of the beachside sewage pipes ASAP. We must stop contaminating ground water and releasing millions of gallons of sewage during major storms.

• A storm plan that includes one easy solution: shut the water off so that there is no sewage being pumped. Then, pump the sewage pipes clear of storm water. Then, restore the system.

• Engagement by outside experts to look at the problem as a system. “Brown River County” is full of experts who have sold out.

I ask you: How can Florida Power & Light replace every beachside power pole and traffic pole to make them storm proof and yet we have no storm plan for sewage? In the same time period, the utilities department has replaced less than a half mile of sewer pipe and snarled traffic for over a year.

Scott Hoffman of Satellite Beach is a 27-year resident of Brevard County, a retired Northrop Grumman aerospace engineer and naval officer.