Surprise! Men Hate Beyoncé’s Pixie Cut

ICYMI, though there’s really no way you could have, Beyoncé cut all her hair off last week. We were among the hundreds of websites who made lighthearted jest of extreme internet reactions, and not even a week later we’ve pretty much forgotten about it.

Until we dug up a humorous really dumb survey that landed in our inboxes over the weekend. Creepy online dating website WhatsYourPrice.com took it upon themselves to survey a whole bunch of dudes about whether Beyoncé is still hot without all her hair, and – surprise! – they preferred her long locks.

This truly groundbreaking study selected 10,000 photos of female members with short hair (above shoulders) and 10,000 photos of female members with long hair, and we hope your photo wasn’t one of the former group because it looks like you’re only getting $73.13 for your next date. Your longer-haired and therefore way more beautiful competition will get a cozy $126.49. We’re not actually sure what these figures represent (do the women actually get paid to go on dates? Do the men get to keep the hair?) but that’s another issue. The site surveyed 8,266 single males and a “staggering” 89 percent of men did not approve of Beyoncé’s new do.

The hook reads, ‘Perhaps this will end the debate? You decide,” before contemplating whether the haircut was “a risk well-made or a complete mistake.” As if a beautiful woman (who is incidentally married to one of the most successful entrepreneurs in America) really cared about the opinions of a bunch of random dudes on the internet who would, IRL, probably cut off one of their arms for a date with her.

For women who aren’t Beyoncé, there are plenty of reasons to get a haircut. Some feel more confident with short hair, some prefer short, healthy hair over long, chemically damaged hair, and some are good natured enough to cut off for a cause. Organizations like Locks of Love and Wigs 4 Kids are unlikely to benefit from the unwanted opinions of creepy online dating sites. And given that it’s not 1950, worrying about the correlation between a getting a haircut and getting a date should definitely not be an issue.

The survey also asked men what they thought of Miley Cryus’ crop (94% disapproved), so at least they’re picking on stars who obviously DGAF about charming the masses.