I am an evil giraffe. Who no longer blogs about politics.

Well… no. But I had once made a joke elsewhere to the effect that if I ever ran a restaurant I would totally have “Build-a-Burgers” on the menu, complete with obscure conspiracy theory puns. And lo! – Back Yard Burgers is plotting to extend its tendrils through American cuisine via the insidious use of Build-a-burgers. You can get guacamole on yours: guacamole. Which is made from avocados. And I need hardly remind you of the NAFTA trade wars over avocados, now do I?