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CHEETO BANDITO

IMMIGRANTS OH MY

FRIDA KAHLO 4EVERS!

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: I’m making tacos for teashers at Mijo’s eschool

Hola, is Tia Lencha here, in my kishen making tacos for the teashers at Mijo’s eschool.

The teashers are having a estrike becoz they want all the niños (thas kids for you pochos) no to be like sardines in the classrooms. Mijo says there are 40 estudens in his class! How can the teasher pay attenshun to so many niños? I can barely pay attenshun to Mijo when my favorite novela is on the televishun.

Mijo is helping me make the tacos for the teashers. He believes in la causa of the estrike. He says is no about the money only for teashers. Even though they get pay caca, those teashers. I always buy them giff cards for Targuess or Estarbus for all the holidays, so they can buy a relaxing candle or sone coffee. I dunno why, but teashers like coffee so much!

Mijo says the teashers are going to lose pay for being on estrike, but they are doing it for the estudens. Can you believe? They ask for money for eschool counselors, nurses and librarians.

“So, Mijo, what happen now at eschool when ju haf a problem, or ju are bleeding, or ju are looking for a book? “

“You are out of luck.”

“Ju are kidding me!”

“The teachers also want less standardized testing.”

“I dunno what is that.”

“It’s a test the students take that is part of a system made for to keep our people down.”

“How?”

“The tests are not made for Mexican peoples. There are no Mexican words on the test. “

I say, “Gwat? What about the word, salsa?”

“No,” he say.

“Frijoles? “

“No,” he say.

“La migra?

“Tortillas?

“No,” he say.

“Pendejo?

“Someone wrote that on the desk.”

“Well, at least,” I say. “But gwhy are those tests so important?”

“If the school don’t do good on the tests, they can get closed down and the charter schools can steal the money.”

“But I thought the eschool district esteal the money.”

“No, they just say they don’t have it.”

“Two billion dollars? Thas like when jur daddy use to say he didn’t haf money and then when he was esleeping, I would go get his gwallet, and he had a big roll of dinero. Is not true.”

“All I know is that the money for public schools is never enough.”

“Like when jur Tia Concha makes food and only gives us two espoons of frijoles on our plate?”

“Yes, exactly.”

“Like everyone want to be eskinny like her…”

“All the brown kids and the poor kids go to public schools.”

“Oh,” I say. “So the teashers are sticking up for the kids in public eschools. ¡Viva la causa! Can we make them sone coffee too? I bet they never try café de olla. I make coffee and put sone piloncillo and sone cinnamon. That gwill be so better than that $6 dollar coffee they drink.”

“What will we put the coffee in?”

“Les put in the big thermos, Mijo.”

“Yeah, the teachers always walk with their coffee mugs in their hands!”

“Good, so they can hold their coffee in one hand and their picket sign in the other hand!”

“And where will they hold their tacos?”

“That gwill already be in their estomachs, a course.”

“Mama, can I have some coffee too?”

“Don’t push jur luck Mijo. Ju gwill be awake all night like the rooster from next door.”