What I am listening to!

May 01, 2005

I'm not sorry for.....

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone had a fantastic weekend. Mine was good, we spent yesterday cleaning the house because a couple of friends were coming over for dinner. I was cleaning, multitasking of course and I flooded my kitchen with bleach water. The Mr. wasn't pleased, but hell we have sanitized cabinets, probably the cleanest cabinets and silverware drawer in the county. Ugh.

The small dinner party was a success. I made whole wheat pasta and a new sauce that I got off of the Goosecross Winery website. It was spectacular. It had diced tomatoes, onions, garlic, Goosecross' Amerital (red wine) Vodka, cream cheese, red and yellow peppers and other spices. I was VERY surprised at just how good it was. Our guests enjoyed it as well. Plus I had sauteed eggplant, squash and zucchini. YUM. The evening was full of laughs and merriment, just the way it should be.

I have to say that I started this blog/journal for 2 reasons. One of which was to work on my writing skills which I am MOST certainly lacking, and the other reason was to help me work out my thoughts and feelings. I have been under a lot of stress for a little over 2 years with living part time in St. Pete, the other in Lakeland, working in Clearwater, selling my condo, building and buying a brand new house south of Tampa, to planning a wedding. I wasn't dealing well with my stress and it took a toll on me. I would snap at the dumbest little things, and I wasn't always 100% on the rational side. Oh yea let's not forget dealing with a cancer scare, surgery, and hormones. So I needed a place to vent my frustrations, and come to terms with things that were bothering me in my life. Things that maybe I should make a federal case about to friends, but wanted to kind of work it out on my own instead my own form of therapy. I do consider this my diary.

When I read others posts, I might not like and or agree with what they have written but I believe that it's everyone's right to write what they want and if I have a problem with it, I just stop reading, it's certainly not my place to hold someones personal thoughts and feelings against them.

With that said, my post "no posties" has officially been held against me. I was basically bitched out for not sharing my feelings directly with the person whom I wrote about. I then was blasted for airing her life on the Internet. Both of which I refuse to apologize for. I feel if you read someones diary and you don't like what they have to say, tough. That post is not slanderous, malicious, or fictitious and with the issues said person has I didn't think it that big of a deal to add to her list of growing drama. I was simply working out some feelings I had. It's my little space in the world, and I shouldn't have my personal thoughts and feelings held against me. One thing is for sure though, I was 100% correct, in knowing that yes indeed I am in the line of fire, if it wouldn't have been this she would have found something else to blame me for. I will not be censored for any purpose seeing that most of that post was me explaining the bad thing I did, I had a right to feel the way I did, and to write about it. I don't use real names on this site, I don't give addresses and phone numbers and very few friends of mine actually have this link. Furthermore NO ONE CARES! Ya that is harsh but honestly do any of y'all really care?

She has put our friendship on the line, and I refuse to be bullied into thinking that what I did was wrong. I have been a great friend to her, and she will miss my support, but it is entirely her loss. I will not be censored just because I told the truth, which ended up being more true that I really wanted it to be. I am at peace with what happened, and don't regret a word. I even re-read the post just to make sure I wasn't out of line, and I wasn't. I wish her the best.

So, ya... long post full of feelings etc... which is quite OKAY because that's why I started this blog in the first place.

Comments

Good for you. I'm a firm believer that we should write whatever we want. As long as no one is sharing real names and such what the hell difference does it make?

It's our space to write what we want. It's our space to work through whatever we want to work through. If people can't handle it they need to move on.

Even those people who take it upon themselves to post really offensive and cruel stuff in their blogs can do so--I don't have to read it if I don't like it. (And I seriously don't like it or agree with it)

Isn't that why we start blogs? To express ourselves? So why should you censor yourself for anyone? Don't let anyone make you feel bad for what you posted. Its your space girl, do what you want with it! If people don't like it - they can leave!!!