Ok, it's true. My food bores me. I need to keep more primal options around the house. I loved, loved, loved the Hathaway Farms pork chops. I was meh on the grass-fed sirloin. I do still love bacon but I haven't been getting up early enough. And sardines are to be kept to a minimum. Okay, well live and learn. I guess I miss my breakfast -- haven't had it in two days.

I already know this, but it bears repeating: there is an inverse relationship between the amount of sleep I get and the amount and strength of carb cravings I get the next day. I've been taking a class that meets once a week, and ends at 10, which means I get home at 11. My roommate's dog AND cat died yesterday (oh my god, horrible) and she needed to talk to someone. I have to say, I was not the best person to talk to because I was falling asleep standing up.

There is also an inverse relationship between the amount of sleep I get and how much I care about any given thing. Work, sex, working out, being creative, or even being able to have a conversation with another human being. I'll be 31 in two weeks and 6 hours of sleep basically leaves me a carb-crazed zombie who could give a sh*t about sh*t. (I guess the good thing about NOW -- being Primal for almost 2 months now (wow!) -- is that "carb-crazed" means eating 3 squares of Lindt thins first thing when I get to work without even caring. And then stopping. Not a whole package of Oreos. I guess that's pretty great.)

I've just signed up for a 2-month acting class that meets on Sundays until 9 (earliest bedtime then would be 10pm), and Mondays until 10 (earliest bedtime would then be 11). UGH. I guess I could basically be saying goodbye to faster weight loss for the next two months, right? Having had a lot of sleep before this class, I'm realizing HOW IMPORTANT sleep is in my ability to handle stress.

I am not doing very well in stretching my food budget, even thought I've ballooned it. And then I look at my Mint, and I realize that even though I set a budget for food, I have obviously spent a part of it (a lot of it) on non-groceries things, and that is why I am left with chicken sausages, eggs, and bacon for the rest of the month. I read about Paleo Plan (Paleo Plan | Making the Paleo Diet Easier) on Tim Ferris' blog -- I wonder if it would be helpful to me with grocery planning. Or maybe I'm lazy and can do it myself. Or maybe it is like training wheels, and it will teach me how to do it myself.

I'm probably exercising too early on LR, but it makes me feel so good. I'm standing taller, walking more firmly on the ground. I feel more graceful and supported.

There's also a direct relationship between my dairy consumption and my weight. I've had like 4 small cups of cottage cheese in the past 2 days and my weight has shot up again. Good lord.

On the other hand, not eating after 4pm is helping me fall asleep as soon as I lay down, which is new. If I do get hungry, it sort of goes away. It's like, it's okay, you do your thing, I'll be back tomorrow. No need to get all freaked out about anything.

I've also been considering the idea that weight is somehow a protection thing. I've had my share of stuff happen that, if I think honestly about it, means I feel it's unsafe to be a slender, attractive woman. I have a lot of ambivalence about it. I think the best way to counter that is to take up some form of martial arts -- so I can protect myself should I have the need. Then I won't have to hide in this biological fat suit.

Inflammation. I can tell I still have high inflammation because a) I have excess water weight (from dairy), b) my eyes are puffy and sore every morning, c) I have a toothache, and d) I have a bruise on my hand that is taking FOREVER to heal. It IS healing, but the healing is soooo slow. Very bizarre. I think I'd like to try re-mineralizing my teeth before going to get fillings. (Hello, bone broth!) And I've been putting coconut oil in my eyes before bed to kill any nasties that may have decided to set up shop there. My eyes are better and better every day, but not 100%. I've been taking extra Vitamin K and putting arnica and castor oil on my bruise. Hmmm...

Today they ordered [trigger food] for lunch again. It's some of the best [trigger food] in the city. I'm putting "[trigger food]" where I write about trigger foods...so no one gets triggered by specifics. New practice.

They also always order chicken breasts and arugula salad for all the non-bread eaters, but surprise! The arugula on my plate gives me the heebies. But haven't taken any [trigger food]. Good...good...

Thanks for all the links! I can't wait to read up on them. I suspect my son has some ADHD tendencies that we can control with diet pretty easily if I could just get him to eat. Going to order "Eat like a Dinosaur" now that the Whole Family's giveaway is over... I didn't win but wanted the book badly enough that I said I'd buy it anyway.

I love the way you wrote [trigger food]. I pictured some cartoon character screaming "TRIGGER FOOD" in a goofy, psycho crazy voice every time I saw it.

My breakfast bores me too. It was 2-3 boiled eggs with 3 Jone's Natural fully cooked sausage links. Sooooo tired of boiled eggs! And the sausage was starting to smell like hog poo (and I know what hog poo smells like b/c my stepdad used to be a hog producer back in the day before he realized the real money was in fat grain fed cows). So to break the monotony, I started eating Hormel Natural Choice lunch meat with some kind of sliced white (real) cheese and smeared with sour cream. Yummo... but I'm finding it's my go-to for every meal now so I'm sure I'll either be missing some vital nutrients or I'll get tired of it... Such is life, I guess.

I hope you have a great weekend. I'm not good at weekend reading. Too much stuff going on.

Interesting . . . I'm pretty sure I have ADD, though I've never been tested because it's prohibitively expensive.

Actually, to be more accurate, I was tested in kindergarten, but they decided I was just gifted and not being challenged. I suspect I'm a little of both, and because I'm intelligent I have greater control over my impulses than some ADD kids and adults.

I'm new to primal, so I wonder if eating this way will change my level of distractability. Though part of me is afraid of that. I've learned to thrive with my short attention span, not sure how I'd do as "normal".

Interesting . . . I'm pretty sure I have ADD, though I've never been tested because it's prohibitively expensive.

Actually, to be more accurate, I was tested in kindergarten, but they decided I was just gifted and not being challenged. I suspect I'm a little of both, and because I'm intelligent I have greater control over my impulses than some ADD kids and adults.

I'm new to primal, so I wonder if eating this way will change my level of distractability. Though part of me is afraid of that. I've learned to thrive with my short attention span, not sure how I'd do as "normal".

My last psychiatrist diagnosed me with depression and she was l e a n i n g towards an ADD diagnosis, and the medication she put me on (Wellbutrin) is a tertiary treatment for it. I first suspected that I had ADD when I was at a diagnosed friends house and went through this book of hers, ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life. I think I read the whole thing in a day, and I was like, "OH MY GOD, THESE PEOPLE ARE LIKE ME." I thought I was just artsy, just a flighty, easily distracted person who was that way because she was a creative type. I'm very intelligent too, which is why I think I got to my mid-twenties without anyone suspecting. I think that's something I'd like to go back to and explore. And, I admit, this weekend I was thinking of going back on my medication. It makes me creatively productive and active and skinny. I had a rough weekend of mostly lying in bed and watching ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT and BLUE PLANET. I felt very avoidant and awkward and depressed. Plus it is HOT AS HELL in NYC now, and I am not prepared. I have to wait until the weekend to get an air conditioner. I think I'm a temperate zone person. I think I've known that for a long time. I don't do well here in the winters (it's so cold and don't want to do anything), and I don't do well in the summers (it's so hot I don't want to do anything.) A Los Angeles move? We'll see...

I would love to not be highly distractible. I would love to not be so emotionally labile. I would love to not be puffy. I would love to remember to call people back.

I was reading this and other ADD articles and articles on autism. I was really touched by reading about a character on BOSTON LEGAL with Asperger's who carried notecards around with him, reminding him to shake hands with people and to thank the jury, etc. Sometimes I feel like I need stuff like that. I remember being a little girl, and people thought I was really shy and weird. You'd never know that now. Now if you met me, you'd call me vivacious and bubbly. (180 degree turnaround.) I remember studying people, popular kids in school to see how they acted. I remember watching MEAN GIRLS, and when the head Plastic complements a girl on her bracelet and then talks sh*t about it behind the girl's back, I was like, Oh my god, do you mean that people might be being inauthentic when they do that! Oh my god! I felt like people knew how to socialize in ways that I didn't. I had to learn all of that by watching people. I could go all summer and not see my friends. I'd just hang out at home with my brothers and read books and paint, and then when I'd get to school I'd be so surprised that all my friends hung out all summer.

So I guess I have it down now. In high school, some of my friends called me a hermit. In college, a lot of people called me a social butterfly. People don't believe that I used to be shy. I guess I am still somewhat shy -- I just learned how to fake being gregarious. Now I just have to learn organization and management skills to handle greater complexity instead of being overwhelmed.

Anyway...as for the LR:

*My sleep is getting better and better. Even when I get less sleep than I need, I still feel MORE rested. (Last night I didn't fall asleep until midnight, and it's because I had iced tea after noon. I woke up at 6:30...feeling NOT groggy! Hooray) But I am a bit bloated. I know that we adjust our sodium/potassium levels when we sleep, and I've noticed that if I don't get enough sleep I get bloated. So...that's something to notice.
*I do have more energy on the weekends, even if I do still take long naps.
*I had a small ice cream cone this weekend, and now my skin is all rough and uneven, and I got contact dermatitis from my necklace. I've basically been wearing my necklace non-stop for a week, so it's totally the wheat in the cone, and the dairy in the ice cream. I have to restart my 9 month of healing from wheat because of this. :-(
*I had a small glass of gin with lime juice on Friday with my roommate -- that could contribute to my feelings of depression.
*I had a few chocolates -- I think they were due to low magnesium. I had a monster charley horse in my leg and one night I was mad for chocolate. I remembered hearing that chocolate cravings could be due to low magnesium, so I took a high dose of Natural Calm, and both my charley horse and the cravings went away. Win!

I took my fancy vitamins this morning, the ones with fructose and powdered milk in them, because I was feeling depressed, and they're supposed to be amazing for depression, bipolar, and ADD/ADHD. I immediately had cramping. :-/ But I do feel alert and not-sad. So that's good. I need to see if they'll switch the powder version out for caplets. I wish they'd do a sugar-free, gluten-free, casein-free version. So I'll take them to feel better, but I do need to switch them out.

How did everyone else do over the holiday wknd?

***Now that I've reminded myself -- I think I'll pick up a new copy of ADD Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life