Kids At Weddings – How Do I Tell People Their Children Are Not Invited?

When you start planning your wedding, and you’re starting to think about the experience that you want for yourselves and your guests, the question of whether you should invite children to your wedding can be a pretty tricky subject. Especially if you’ve got siblings or close friends who have kids.

Kids At Weddings

Kids at weddings can be pretty cute, sometimes hilarious but also on occasions rather distracting. And depending on the type of wedding your planning, having guests bringing their children along might be a bit of a problem. Especially if your dream wedding involves long-haul flights or hiking for an hour to the perfect ceremony location.

And while some wedding guests might relish in a child-free weekend, others may be less than pleased with the idea of leaving their little ones at home.

A few months ago Kat from the wedding blog Rock N Roll Bride did a Facebook live on the issue and the conversation afterwards got quite heated. Needless to say, this topic divides opinions.

So how do you approach the subject without upsetting anyone?

Honestly, you might not be able to.

So what should you do?

Decide Early On

When you’re starting to talk about your wedding plans and deciding on who you’re going to invite, you’ll need to already know if you want children to be involved or not. Don’t wait until people have made plans to attend before you let them know.

Be Clear In Your Messages

Some people say that only addressing the invitation to the adults in the house is enough. But sometimes people don’t pick up on these subtle messages. Others say to add a line in the wording about an “adults only wedding” but that can seem too blunt to some people. So how do you break the news? Be honest with them. Pick up the phone or go for a drink and speak to your parent friends about it directly. If you’re British like me, having a difficult conversation is something you try to avoid at all costs. But for occasions such as this, it’s really the best way to go.

Explain your decisions.

Explain to them how you envision your wedding day and explain why having children around isn’t what you want. You will get lots of mixed opinions, and some people may be upset by your decision. Just remember that it’s your wedding day, and you get to celebrate it how and with whom you choose.

Be Understanding But Firm

Be prepared for them to RSVP that they will not be able to attend and let them know that you are understanding about it (even if they try to be difficult about it).

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