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Hello! Thank you so much for visiting me in the Attic, it's lovely to see you. My name is Lucy and I'm a happily married Mum with three children. We live in a cosy terraced house on the edge of the Yorkshire Dales in England which we are slowly renovating and making home. I have a passion for crochet and colour and love to share my creative journey. I hope you enjoy your peek into my colourful little world x

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March 30, 2010

To Elspeth :: With Love

I cannot find the words to describe how devastated I felt yesterday when I learnt that Elspeth Thompson was gone. My hand flew to my mouth and I cried big ploppy drops that worried the Little people. My heart ached all day, a really heavy, horrid achey feeling that would not go away.

I feel the same today, although without the debilitating shock factor. But the achey feeling of Loss and Disbelief is still there, pulling on my heart in that same heavy, insistent way.

This is how I genuinely feel, yet I have never met Elspeth, only know her through her beautiful words and pictures, through the emails we wrote to each other. Just goes to show that the Friendships forged in The Land of Blog are as strong, beautiful, amazing and giving as any that form in our "real lives".

Elspeth :: I shall miss you, more than I am able to say. You touched upon my life in such in inspiring and wonderful way, I can't thank you enough for all that you gave me. You will always be in my thoughts and in my heart.

Having suffered from depression all my life I can empathasise. Bizarrely I was reading the RHS magazine and she had written one of this months articles about Auriculas. Obviously happy on the outside but not on the inside. Sometimes we become the greatest actors in the world.

It was the saddest news and I reacted in the same way as you Lucy. This world of blogging that we belong to brings people close to us without us actually meeting and I felt as sad as I would have done had she been someone I had met.

Dearest Lucy, hug your little people and keep them safe and happy. It's difficult to comprehend Elspeth's death. I swing from disbelief to anger that she left her little person without a mummy, but her depression, despite the public persona, must have been vast.... It makes me realize how unreal our blogosphere can be. I look at her fabulous 'homemade' book, and don't understand... So many of us thought she had the 'perfect' life... I wonder how many of the people we admire online are secretly so unhappy? I feel humbled and count my blessings, I'm sure you do too. With love Martina x

Hello Lucy
I regularly read Elspeth's blog and was so saddened to see the entry by her husband. Her blog never gave any hint of her troubled mind. I do hope and pray that she finds peace in God's care. I admired her work greatly and she will be missed by many who like me did not know her personally.
Gemma (Coventry, West Midlands)

I find this particularly tragic. I hadn't known anything about Elspeth (more shame me), but to feel things are too hard to keep on going, *even with a five year old child* is heartrending.

That's three creatives I've heard of who've left us too young in recent months - Alexander Mcqueen, Krisitan Digby (he of "To Buy or Not to Buy" - but also a gifted film-maker) and now Elspeth Thompson. It's horribly, horribly sad.

I always read your blog and I love it. I feel your sadness.I knew ELSPETH from your blog so I feel sadness too.
There is a spanish song that said
CUANDO UN AMIGO SE VA QUEDA UN ESPACIO VACIO QUE NO LO PUEDE LLENAR LA LLEGADA DE OTRO AMIGO...
IT is true your friend will be always with you.

Lucy, I've never heard of her before today, but I'm sorry of a talented young woman lost... and I'm sorry that your heart is in pain for this cause. I'm sure you have to grive it for some time... but I hope (and I'm sure) that you will be full of that great happiness so distinctive of yours.
I send you a hug with love.
Shanti

Thank you for phrasing so eloquently how I feel. Personally, I don't know you and I didn't know Elspeth, but I feel that I do know you both from your writings and pictures. We have so much in common. At present, I have two close personal circumstances related to cancer -a godmother and a friend/mother of a 6 year old at school. Elspeth's death is as rawly sad to me as both of these and I've never set eyes on her or talked on the phone. This is the first time I've been truly affected by the death of someone I don't know on a personal level and my mind is whirring. From Elspeth's death and the manner of it, I will move forward more gently in every way. Too sad to put into words. I wish for peace for those she has left behind and for herself. x

Hi Lucy. I enjoy your blog. I daresay however that after learning about Elspeth and the shock many have about how she died, I think it proves quite the opposite of what you say. The connections made via the Internet aren't like real world friendships where we might actually know someone. We may be touched by someone on-line or feel emotionally moved by them or appreciate their creativity, but it's not the same as a strong direct personal "Friendship" where you truly know the person in "real life." Apparently, many people didn't really know her or of her depression - or the shock would not be as profound. We need to take care on-line, as we may think we know someone, and we really don't. I am praying for Frank and his daughter and, as depression can be genetic, I pray he is able to assist his LP in getting the assistance she may well need. Blessings...

i reacted as you did - and was in shock. and still am. my life is rather tough right now and one way i cheer myself up is reading several women's blogs - yours and Elspeth's are among the ones that help me feel less blue - by reading of the glimpses of life in your blogs i feel a part of a kind of life i wish i were living - and may never have - however for a brief time it helps take me away from the current troubles.

i am still reeling in a deep place inside about ET's suicide ... depression is a dangerous black place to be ... and takes a strong sense of survival to climb out from under - the hardest part is the facade that was in her posts - i love that she continued to find joy but ache that she felt she couldnt share or get help about the illness (although i dont know that)

in trying to explain to myself, i seem to remember something about her mother's death last year - was it the anniversary? - in trying to understand why?

to me her life seemed one of charm and beauty and grace and joy and love from family and friends - many things that to a mere reader seemed to add up to a wonderful life.

oh the ache and tragedy of it! and the pain she must have had in that final act.

I only discovered Elspeth Thompson in recent months through your blog list on the side. I went back through all her posts and eagerly revisited often to see what she was up to. I was devastated yesterday when I saw the announcement from her husband. And I feel for her little girl Mary. The whole thing is so sad. I admit I shed a few tears also.

Lucy, I'm so sorry for the heaviness in your heart. Thank you for sharing this post, especially for those who did not know Elspeth. Through you, her creativity, inspiration and positive energy still reaches many.