Golfer who improves his lie must learn to tell the truth

Dear Abby

Posted: May 15, 2012

DEAR ABBY: One of my friends, “Max,” cheats at golf. He moves his ball closer to the hole on the green and “improves” his lie when he thinks no one is looking. I have tried to overlook Max’s transgressions, but others in our golf group talk and joke behind his back. How should I go about stopping the problem without stressing our friendship?

— Florida Golfer

DEAR GOLFER: What you have described is considered a terrible breach of golf etiquette. What it shows about Max is a serious lack of ethics. Because you feel close to him, take him aside and tell him privately as a friend that it’s time to knock off the cheating because the others are onto him, and he’s making himself a laughingstock.

DEAR ABBY: I have a good friend, “Renee,” who is Canadian and a permanent resident of the United States. She’s always saying how “nice” Canadians are and how rude Americans are.

On a recent trip we took to Canada, she commented about a cashier who was nice to us by saying, “That cashier wouldn’t have been so nice if we were in America.” When I try to point out evidence to the contrary, Renee shrugs it off and calls it an exception to the rule.

How should I politely ask her to knock off bashing Americans?

— Love It or Leave It

DEAR LOVE IT OR LEAVE IT: Do it by “politely” pointing out to Renee that it is rude to make comments that make others uncomfortable, and if Canadians are as “nice” as she says they are — and that includes her — she’ll quit putting down Americans because you find it offensive. n