“That was one of the best days of my life. Thank you so much for taking me,” C.J. said as Matt tucked him into bed for the night.

Most kids say that to their parents after a day at an amusement park. Not our kid. He said it after we took him to his first Pride.

On Wednesday, we told C.J. that we were taking him to the local Pride on Saturday. His level of excitement was unprecedented. He’d seen pictures of Pride and, with all the visual rainbow-ness, he’d been asking to go for the last year.

I told him that we needed to make signs. We did need signs, but mostly it was a project to keep him busy for a few summer hours.

C.J’s sign

Matt’s sign

My sign

The night before Pride, C.J. laid out his outfit. He woke up at the crack of dawn the next day to get ready. And, even though we didn’t plan to leave the house until 10:15 a.m., he started contouring his face at 8 a.m.

We arrived before the parade got started and, admittedly, the vibe wasn’t initially all rainbows and glitter. The parade got a late start and, from where we were sitting, C.J. couldn’t see the festival area I told him about. He was a little worried that he’d gotten his Pride hopes up too high.

He watched the parade pass by. As with all new things, he observed quietly before letting himself go and clapping and jumping for the goodies being thrown by the parade participants. As the parade ended, we followed it to the festival.

“I loved the parade. I wish it was longer. And next year I want to be in it for sure. Who knows, I may even be in drag in the parade next year,” C.J. said as we walked.

The festival was everything C.J. hoped it would be and then some. There were free things, candy, games and contests. He also noticed that there were a lot of condoms. C.J. was also a big hit at the festival.

Hula hooping to earn a bag of candy from Kimpton Hotels.

“People kept stopping me saying ‘always be who you are. Never change. You’re so awesome.’ And, I took so many pictures with people,” he said smiling.

My sweet, fabulous, rainbow boy has never received so many compliments. He’s used to getting stares and whispers when we’re out in public. He’s not used to getting the smiles, hugs and encouragement he received at Pride.

The cotton candy lady hooked him up with rainbow cotton candy bigger than his head sprinkled with edible gold glitter.

When it was time to go, he didn’t want to leave and offered to stay at Pride by himself. He said he would ride home in a taxi. We said no.

We stopped to eat on the way to our car and I asked C.J. what he liked best about Pride.

“I liked the vibe. I liked all the colors. But, most of all, I liked all of the people. Nobody judges anybody. You can just be who you want to be. There should be Pride every week, because it’s so much fun,” he explained.

I brought my gender non-conforming son to his first Pride this year also. He’s 7 (and a half if you ask him) and he really did feel pride in who he was. He got fist bumps, high-fives and hugs from people who he didn’t know. He was so blown away to see so many people who are like him. I agree with CJ, pride should be every week!

Such a great read! I have a foster son soon to be adopted who is starting to figure out who he is. The foster home he was in before us shamed him all the time. He’s only 10! I am so grateful everyday he made it to my home where my husband and I are supportive like you guys.

I usually do not post anonymously, but I will for this comment, for obvious reasons. I was one of many crew members on the TV show Shark for two seasons. I can tell you unequivocally that James Woods is a narcissist to the nth degree. Anyone in his life is there in order for him to gain ground someway, somehow. I can guarantee you that he truly has very little emotions one way or the other about your son, it was just a handy way to create drama that day. I’m sorry that he chose your son that day. I’m sorry that your family was hurt by his damaged persona. I know you’re probably still too angry to feel sorry for him, but after two years of working with him, I do. I don’t believe that man will ever truly know what happiness is until he is gone to the afterlife. Congratulations on being such great parents and for responding so positively!

I read the story about the tweet from James Woods yesterday, and I am appalled by his words. I honestly think that your son is extremely lucky to have wonderful parents like you. The fact that he was extremely excited about going to a pride parade shows that you are raising him the right way, and allowing hm to express himself.

I’m also impressed with how he dressed himself, and his pleasure in wearing makeup. He looked like he thoroughly enjoyed himself, and I hope you keep taking him to parades like that. I’m sure he will grow into a wonderful young man. Well done 🙂

I, like many others here, have come across your blog as a result of something ugly. If nothing else that ugliness led to so much positivity, and for that I am grateful. I otherwise would likely never have had the opportunity to glance into the lives of you and your beautiful family. I echo the lovely sentiments posted here. I’m teary-eyed seeing the outpouring of love and support. Thanks to you and everyone for restoring my faith in humankind. Love to all of you!

Hi there. Saw your story on Huffpost. I can honestly say I identify with what C.J. is experiencing as he grows up. Although I have not identified directly as gender creative, probably because of my age (mid 30s), and the era I was brought up in, I definitely am. I was born of the female sex, but everything else about me is very male. No matter the length of my hair, or how hard I tried to ‘conform’ I got called sir from the time I was knee high to a grasshopper. My sisters friends would call on our landline as a kid and tell her they talked to her Brother. The problem was, our brother was deployed in the military at the time. They were actually talking to me. I was asked if I was gay or wanted to be a boy by my classmates for as long as I can remember. I never liked dresses, hated makeup. I was harassed at school because I walked like a ‘football player’. I was bullied because I was just plain different, and no amount of walking up and down my parents’ hall with a book on my head, trying to dress girly, or putting on makeup could change who I fundamentally was or am. Childhood can be, and was often, hard…but then I grew up. I had great parents who, although not nearly as accepting or proactive as you all are, somehow understood that I was who I was and nothing was going to change that. So they accepted it wholeheartedly and never looked back. I am proof positive that life in the middle is amazing. I work in tech and travel frequently, meeting clients on a regular basis. No one even bats an eyelash when I walk in, with my male suit, my super short (think crew cut) hair, and my superman glasses. I get called Sir daily, and no C.J., I don’t correct them either. I get awkward comments and looks when I walk into the ladies room at the airport…so I use it as an opportunity to educate. I have amazing friends and family. I am married, and anytime I am introduced by my Wife to someone, often they come back and refer to me as “her husband”. We laugh to ourselves, we correct them in that situation, and again we use it as an opportunity to show others that diversity is a positive thing.

As humans, we come in all shapes, sizes, looks, and personalities. I live my life as an example that we can be very different from what society says we have to be, but if we are true to ourselves, then that light shines brighter than any bigotry, ignorance or malice ever could. And that is something worth pursuing…worth fighting for.

So let the James Woods of the world show their ignorance. The fear and isolation that grows seeds so very hateful is toxic to those who harbor it. Take no part in it. Nothing good comes of it.

I see your light, I am part of your light, and I will shine both with you and for you, as the example of what your life will be…amazing and beautiful.

Love,

-Tiger (that’s what my friends call me, and seeing as we seem to be kindred spirits, I consider you a friend)

Hi, this is awesome!! Not all kids that come out or even adults, get the love and support they would love to get from their family and friends. My son/nephew recently came out ( he never came out and had a talk with me) , but I always kind of knew. He is 17 yrs old, has a bf and is very happy. I tell him no matter what I love him, I only have worried some that he will be bullied or treated mean by some ( of course as his mom/auntie I will protect him) as a lion will protect her babies 😊😊🤗🤗 but I know as he grows and matures, he will encounter some who aren’t kind. You just have to pray that he will encounter more people who are kind and not hateful

Wow, this gave me all of the feels (I had to pretend like I wasn’t crying at work). So proud of you for doing right by your child. You and your husband should be an inspiration for parents everywhere, and you’re definitely the kind of mother I want to be someday.

I just read this and I, too, am tying to pretend I’m not crying at work. I just loved reading about this wonderful family. I wish there were many, many more people in this world like Lori, Matt and C.J. What an inspiration!

1. I would like to commend you for allowing your son to just be himself and do what makes him happy. Although some people suck (like he who shall not be named) I hope your son always feels the love and acceptance he felt that day. 2. If you guys are ever in NYC for NY Pride, look me up. I would be more than willing to treat CJ to a mani/Pedi and hang out with him at Pride.
Although my daughter loves all things girly I am raising her to love and respect EVERYONE no matter what they wear or who they love. I just wish all parents would do that. XOXO

OH MY GOSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH. He will NEVER have to deal with deep, deep, sad, horrifying emotions from fear of “coming out of a closet”. You guys just gave him a home with no closet doors. I just want to shout “amazing parenting” to the computer screen. I do not have these experiences in my family so I do not know first hand what some must struggle with but when I read just the article about the recent tweets and saw your photos, I was so dadgum excited for this kiddo to have an amazing life! WOW! HATS OFF TO PARENTS WHO LOVE THE RIGHT WAY!

Tell me it’s wrong the scarlet nails my son sports or the toy
store rings he clusters four jewels to each finger.

He’s bedecked. I see the other mothers looking at the star
choker, the rhinestone strand he fastens over a sock.
Sometimes I help him find sparkle clip-ons when he says
sticker earrings look too fake.

Tell me I should teach him it’s wrong to love the glitter that a
boy’s only a boy who’d love a truck with a remote that revs,
battery slamming into corners or Hot Wheels loop-de-looping
off tracks into the tub.

Then tell me it’s fine – really – maybe even a good thing – a boy
who’s got some girl to him,
and I’m right for the days he wears a pink shirt on the seesaw in
the park.

Tell me what you need to tell me but keep far away from my son
who still loves a beautiful thing not for what it means –
this way or that – but for the way facets set off prisms and
prisms spin up everywhere
and from his own jeweled body he’s cast rainbows – made every
shining true color.

Now try to tell me – man or woman – your heart was ever once
that brave.

Just read your blog after finding the link in the article of Mr.N.P. Harris commenting on Mr. Woods tasteless & inane comments regarding your son’s first Pride event. As a Canadian who enjoys attending Pride celebrations I’m happy to see some parents granting freedom of expression to their children regardless of sexual orientation. Keep up the good work, wee need more parents like you everywhere..:-)

I agree with CJ, it should be pride every day. I hope he has more experiences like this because he deserves that level of acceptance. It’s unfortunate that there will always be haters whenever anyone steps outside of the narrow mold society allows. Just go on doing what you’re doing. Haters gotta hate… But we don’t have to listen to them.

I just discovered your blog tonight, due to a hateful action. As a parent of an adult gender neutral child, thank you. May his actions, meant to cause pain, bring joy to those of us who now have a little bit bigger community.

My heart broke tonight as I happened to run across a hate-filled tweet from a very well-known actor. (I choose not to formally name him as he doesn’t deserve any sort of credit.) What truly made my heart break was when I instantly realized who this beautiful boy and his parents were in the picture. It was you all!

Please never doubt what you and Matt are doing to support your children. You are helping to show the world how we all need to support our children even in ways we may have never imagined. You are raising two incredible children. They truly know the meaning of unconditional love.

There is simply no room in this world for the kind of hate that was unleashed by said actor who obviously doesn’t know anything about you, CJ, or your story.

Thank you for setting the example. Much love from a teacher who works hard everyday to show love and acceptance for all.

I have nominated you for the Unique Blogger Award! The post is scheduled for Friday at 12:01 a.m. If you do not participate in the award process, no worries! I just wanted to let you know that I am enjoying your blog! Keep writing!
Roda

I led the DC pride parade this year. I’m sure yours was great, but come to DC next year! It is seriously awesome and HUGE!!!!! And kids get to lead it, so CJ could march! We’d be happy to host you :). Are you and CJ headed to the gender spectrum conference this year?

The gift of FREEDOM is precious! You guys just insured CJ will not be sending you to a nursing home in your old age. LOL. I missed NYC Pride this year because I had to work. Thanks for giving a little taste of Pride in your post.

Such a happy post to read, I was smiling all the way through. And he looked so pretty in his pride outfit…I think he does makeup better than me lol. And that cotton candy is something else, I can’t imagine the sugar rush that resulted in. So glad you guys had a great experience.

This is such an incredible post. I love the term ‘gender creative’, it just sounds so happy and lovely. I’m so happy for CJ to have felt so supported and hope those moments help him through the hard times.

I’m not LGBT myself, but I’ve known a lot of people over the years who are (including one of my best friends, who is bi and is like a sister to me), and I have to say your son rocks. This world needs a lot more love, compassion, and confidence, and I’m glad to see your son exhibiting all three. Happy Pride to you and to all the people who are either LGBTQ+ or have been lucky enough to have had and cared for at least one LGBTQ+ person in their lives.

I haven’t seen the term “gender creative” used that much before (it’s a good one!), but the more common term is “gender nonconforming.” And the more I think about it, the more I like “gender creative” – it’s a “freer,” more positive term!

As a transwoman, I am delighted at how you’re encouraging your son to explore their gender. Well done! Whatever s/he does in adult life, your love and support will have given them a solid basis of confidence.

We all should be so proud of your parenting. Children are like wet clay and parents can mould them in whatever shape they want. To teach your kid to respect other’s individual choice is a really commandable thing to do. I feel so proud of you and your lovely boy.

As per usual, this made me cry happy joyous tears for CJ. I wish that sweet kiddo could be at Dallas Pride in Sept so I could give so much encouragement as well. Such a sweetheart! And as always, you are the type of people and parents that everyone should strive to be! If only all people were like your family!! Thank you ALL for being who you are, and happy Pride!!

As parents and as people we want to make every possible attempt to insure the gratification and self-approval one feels toward the self, so as to make the largest investment in an individual’s triumphant attainment for the investment in object relations. In short, their reproductive success. All children should be as lucky to have such accepting and nurturing parents as yourselves. I wish you and your son all the luck and happiness on your journey. A journey that is sure to make a difference.

As parents and as people we want to make every possible attempt to insure the gratification and self-approval one feels toward the self, so as to make the largest investment in an individual’s triumphant attainment for investment in object relations. In short, their reproductive success. Why? Because it means their future happiness. I wish you and your son a world of luck and happiness on your journey. A journey that will surely make a difference. All children should be as lucky to have such accepting and nurturing parents as yourselves.

While certain media sites are posting all negative things about the impact of Pride and LGBT+ community on children, you understand how great it really is and I feel so happy that this happened! He looks truly happy! I hope this continues to spread ❤️💛💚💙💜💕

OMG!!! 😀 You are legit the best parents EVER!!! Your son is beautiful and I am certain that someday somehow, there will be no more stares and whispers, just love. Also, that seemed so fun I wish I had gone…

Hi, I’ve been reading your ‘blog’ for quite awhile now and I have to say that I am so proud of you all and that I’ve been a bit envious of C.J. for a number of things. Unfortunately, my childhood was nothing like C.J.’s and my family growing up was the farthest thing from supportive anything could be. I’m almost 55 years old now and I’ve lived my life my way since the day before I turned 18. That was when I left my family and created my own way. Not to get into anything, I just wanted to say that C.J. is amazing, so are his parents. I just wanted to reply because his first Pride reminded me of mine so many years ago. Such acceptance. Thank you for letting us watch through a window on C.J.’s amazing journey.

I love Pride. Even though I’m not gay, I love to go and support the LGBTQ community. I’m so glad your son had a great time and that you are supportive. You get my vote for parents of the year. And by the way I love that shade of lipstick.

Omg😙😙😙i lov ur lil boy hez cuteee🌹 my daughter is lesbian n i heard it all,i kno the feelin,shes 26 since she was 10 she knew ,we are proud to be her parents, 🌹⚘bless u all n ur lil angel,i lov his make up,,,🎭🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

OMG! This is the sweetest thing ever! You’ve got an amazing family, special mention to the amazing kid. Your kid is right, we aren’t allowed to judge anyone. Whether we support the entire concept behind it or not, we have to appreciate a person for who s/he is and love them regardless. ❤️

More tears here. I remember my first pride, back in 1998. I was 18 and, much like your son, it was the first time I was ever in the middle of a large group of people who were celebrating who I am and how I identify instead of ridiculing me for it. Such a powerful experience, and one I admit I sometimes take for granted living in the liberal city I live in now, in a heteronormative relationship that doesn’t get stares. Bless you, your husband, and your fabulous son!

Tears pouring down my face here in Australia over my breakfast cuppa! I’m SO Following your blog! What a wonderful post, & the signs, & the Love- well done! Best parents ever 🌈❤🌈
Thanks so much for posting, & being who you are ♥️ gabrielle

Beautiful! Brought tears to my eyes reading about your glorious day! You are all so lucky to have each other! Pride in yourself and in who you love is the best gift to have and hold. Huge hugs to you all 🌈🤗🤗🤗🌈

It’s great to hear C.J. enjoyed Pride so much – it’s such a great event wherever you are in the world. I can’t imagine eating that much candy floss though!!! I’m also jealous of people who can hula hoop, my 6 year old goddaughter makes it look so easy but I can’t get the thing to stay off the floor for more than a couple of seconds! 🙂

Wow!! You guys are awesome. You are showing the world how it should be done. Thank you for being such accepting and supportive parents. Being gay can be hard enough, but having your parents support makes it that much easier.

I have heard bit about the Pride Festivals that take place but admit I haven’t had the opportunity to visit one. CJ looked so happy, and all I kept thinking throughout the post is what a terrific parent you are. His happiness is contagious and I wish him a long and happy life .

Oh wow. This brought, just a little, tear to me eye. So wonderful to see massive smiles and real happiness on his face. I think I felt so emotional as it’s just so nice to see someone so happy, yet there are those that hate on people for his very happiness. I hope that makes sense :S I really don’t get why it offends so many people how a person chooses to live or how they identify them self. Lovely, lovely post 🙂

This is exactly why we have Pride! If I had been there and met CJ I’d have told him that just by living his life the way he sees fit, he has helped many many other people, old and young. I hope to meet you all at a Pride someday 🙂

I remember my first pride. I was forty and had just started appearing in public in skirts and blouses. It was one of the best days of my life. It’s so wonderful that CJ can experience it being who he is at such a young age, He is truly blessed!

That’s so wonderful. We took our kids to their first Pride day this past weekend as well. My youngest is transgender and was so excited to go. The city didn’t get the funding they normally do this year so there wasn’t really a parade. That was sad to see but everyone around who came out cheered and was greeting us with “Happy Pride day!” We took in the different booths and vendors, picked up some flags, stickers, stick-on tattoos and pins, and just let our kids soak up the atmosphere. We live in the Vancouver, BC are so there is a huge Pride parade in August we can also go to. Even if we don’t go to it at least now they’ve experienced a quieter but still cool day where everyone is supportive, happy and free to be themselves without judgment.

How to explain to young’uns just how magical this is- that the tears I shed are mostly joy at living this long. With that ever-present sadness. So many people denied this acceptance. Too many kids who never felt so much love.

Took my 6 year old gender creative little guy to the D.C. Pride parade and march and he felt the same way. What an amazing experience for our kids to feel celebrated and accepted. He wore a rainbow bikini and of course lots of sparkly makeup. I held a sign that said “I refuse to be my child’s first bully.” Love my beautiful boy!

I have tears in my eyes reading this! My son is 10 and gender creative. CJ’s statement, “But, most of all, I liked all of the people. Nobody judges anybody. You can just be who you want to be” My son needs to feel that love and acceptance. Thank you for inspiring me to take my guy!