Hell on Wheels

St. Louis’ red-hot vixens of roller derby get ready to make the rounds

By Gabriel Kiley

Mary Manglin’. Riddle Lynn. Josie Stalin. The Educator.

It’s a collection of pseudonyms appropriate for the WWE, but it’s actually a sample of the names you’ll find in the fledging Arch Rival Rollergirls roller-derby league. In fact, the entire St. Louis arm of the growing anti-sport phenomenon is built on in-your-face nomenclature: The league’s acronym is AARG; team names include the Smashinistas and the M-80s. (Even the pedestrian-sounding June Cleavers sound intimidating, once you think about it.) These speed-freak females from their early twenties to their late thirties are slipping into fishnet stockings, striped knee socks, miniskirts and heavy-metal T-shirts to inhabit alter egos at the rink.

Nicknames and eye-catching outfits aside, the sport is all about physicality. “Roller derby attracts a specific type of woman,” says Susan Purnell, a.k.a. SueShe. “This is a group of alpha females, used to being in charge and getting their way. That’s why they gravitate toward each other.”

AARG rinkleader Sarah Kate Buckles, a.k.a. Mary Manglin’, caught the derby bug while taking in a Windy City Rollers league tournament in Chicago last fall. The push has been on ever since to get rolling here in St. Louis, and the ladies have gone, uh, around and around in search of practice facilities, sponsors and a venue. Now, after months of scraping and clawing, they’ve locked down the All American Sports Mall in South St. Louis as their home rink. Their first bout is September 8.

Despite the sport’s decidedly aggressive nature, Amy Blessing, a.k.a. Kate Crime, says her experience in the league has been as enjoyable as her days in such timid-by-comparison extracurriculars as cheerleading and marching band. “I love to perform and love the sport part of roller derby,” says Blessing, who hangs up her skates in South St. Louis and does information-technology work for Precoat Metals. “It’s a sisterhood here.”

The league’s publicity coordinator, Amy Whited, a.k.a. Joanie Rollmoan, networks with leagues in the Midwest, including Chicago and Kansas City, and believes the Arch Rival Rollergirls are on their way to finding a niche in the St. Louis sports scene.

“Those leagues are more established but had a lot of the same growing pains we’re experiencing,” Whited says. “It’s like an automatic sisterhood when I talk with them.”

Rules of the Rink

A roller-derby bout is played with two teams of five skaters who cruise counterclockwise on a small, narrow track. ”Jammers” score one point for each opponent they pass. Blockers try to impede the jammers’ progress, which is where the sport’s physicality comes in. Even with protective gear, injuries are commonplace in practices and demo bouts.