Adam Dachis

A lack of sleep is like being drunk on the job, which is probably more detrimental to your productivity than actually taking a quick nap break during your work hours. If you need to get away with sleeping on the job, here are a few ways to do it.

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Sleeping at work is a bad thing. You can decide for yourself if you feel like you're cheating your company out of money when you sleep during work hours, but it's particularly bad because you are not in a good situation if you have to do it regularly. At a previous job, my company kept an IKEA futon in a storage closet for when employees were overworked and exhausted (and possibly other reasons I don't want to think about). If you need to sleep at work regularly, you either need a new job or have some serious sleep problems to fix. If it's occasional, however, here are a few tips to get away with it.

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If You Have a Private Office, Use It

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Hopefully this is pretty obvious to those of you who are blessed with a door. Shut it, put a do not disturb sign up, and go to sleep. Sleep in your chair. Sleep on the floor. Sleep on the floor under your desk. It's not rocket science, it's common sense. For added comfort, bring a pillow and/or sleeping bag.

Make Use of Blindsides

If you work in a space where other people can see you, you are not completely screwed. Chances are you are not entirely visible from all sides. Figure out where it's hardest to see you and make sure your eyes are facing that direction as much as possible. Often times you won't be seen sleeping just by facing the right direction, but if you need better cover you can put one hand on the side of your head to block your eyes from view. Put the other hand on your computer mouse or hold a pencil on top of a piece of paper. Most people will not be able to tell you aren't really using it as they'll get as much as a quick glimpse. Nobody's assuming that you're trying to sleep because that's not what people generally do in an office. It's not the most comfortable sleeping position, but when you're so tired you just need to close your eyes you won't even notice.

Wear Sunglasses

Nobody can see your eyes when you're wearing sunglasses, so it's incredibly easy to close them without a single person being the wiser. The problem is, how do you wear sunglasses in an office without people thinking you're nuts? You tell them your eyes are tired today and you couldn't find your prescription glasses so you had to take your prescription sunglasses. If anybody tries them on and notices they don't do anything, just tell them they're mild. If you actually have prescription sunglasses, however, then you're in great shape. Either way, just put them on and close your eyes. Just like in the above tip, so long as you're in a position that looks like working you can get away with a little shuteye.

Use Your Car

If you have a sleep emergency, just call it a family emergency and go sleep in your car for an hour. If you don't have a car, take a ride on the subway or a bus. You may even wake up with some spare change in your hand if you look particularly bad that day. This is probably the easiest way to get a quick nap, but it's not a tactic you can use too often without arousing suspicion.

Use the Bathroom

It may be embarrassing to come down with a case of the runs after lunch, but if you fake it you can spend some time on the toilet getting a little shuteye while everyone pities you. Sure, you probably don't want to spend time sleeping on the toilet and the ambient sounds of the bathroom aren't quite as pleasant as your nighttime noise generator, but sometimes we have to make due with what we've got. What you've got is a private stall and a porcelain bed. Make use of it.

What to Do If You Get Caught

The easiest thing to do is admit it while making it look like an accident. There are plenty of scapegoats available to you: your significant other was having a private emotional problem, your young child had midnight diarrhea, someone tried to break in to your home, and so on. There are plenty of things that can happen late at night that mess up your sleep and make you tired the next day, but the point is you still came to work. You're not a slacker, you're a hero. You didn't mean to fall asleep, you just did because you were trying so hard to get your work done. If you can frame it that way, you come across as a decent person (even though you might not be). Kind bosses will even give you the rest of the day off to catch up on sleep out of the kindness of their hearts. You might feel guilty for it, but at least you'll be able to rest up and be better the next day.

On the Other Hand, Just Ask

Sometimes honestly is truly the way to go. Most bosses know what it's like to be tired at work, so if you don't ask too often you might be able to get a free nap on the job just by making the request. You can certainly use the tricks above, but nothing feels better than getting a nap at work when it's company-approved. So, take the honest route first—if you can.

Got any other great tips for sleeping on the job? Let's hear 'em in the comments!
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