If you don't want kids to sniff markers, make them smell like ass, not grapes.

Recent Entries

27th December 2004

5:25pm: i must be bored
wow its been a while since ive updatedthanks to myspace hahawell lets see whats been going onwell i now owrk at haagan daz-my boss is hot hehei got a mini ipod for christmas thanks to my dad yay!i want to buy napoleon dynamite on dvd....damn i gotta go to best buy soonI LOVE MONTY PYTHONthey are my new addiction they are hilarious hahahmm....well nothing else interesting has happened...what a life i haveim getting tired ughill update in like 3 weeks haha laters!

1st December 2004

7:17pm: i hope it snows...
wow its been a while since ive updated..i havent been in the mood for updating lately.my thanksgiving was ok...this past sunday was cool-i hung out with some very wicked awesome people. monday was fun too...we had no school and i finally got to go to the tea place! that place rocks. amoeba was fun too...theres always hot guys there...aiyaiyaiy.its been super dooper cold lately...why? ugh...well theres nothing much to say.oh i saw national treasure.i didnt want to but i did...sigh...well many of you might already know whats going on in my life so i dont need to explain anything.peace

21st November 2004

First job: other than babysitting...Hot Dog On A Stick baby!First self purchased CD: haha i dont remember all i know is i prob dont listen to it anymoreFirst funeral: i've never been to oneFirst piercing/tattoos: My ears First credit card: does a visa logo on your atm card count?First true love: havent found him yetFirst enemy: haha some bitch that got me into trouble in the 2nd gradeFirst big trip: the philippinesFirst concert: nsync haha oh god was i a nerd...First musician you remember hearing in your house: haha i wouldnt rememberFirst kiss: i dont remember Where are they now? um...First relationship: with a guy-havent had one yet

LASTS

Last big car ride: road trip to san franLast kiss: dont remember-it was too long ago-prob from murdochLast library book checked out: haha i dont remember-i dont like library books they're so dirty..Last movie seen: the incrediblesLast beverage drank: water?Food consumed: salt and vinegar chips and yogurt( yoplaits low fat lemon creme pie)Last phone call: from clareLast cd played: ebeLast annoyance: my sister telling me to get off the comp-haha shes still at itLast soda drank: um...i dont drink soda anymore...well not usuallyLast ice cream eaten: chocolate chipLast time scolded: earlier about how dirty the house isLast shirt worn: before the one I am wearing now? my uniform for workLast website visited: some college website to finish my appsLast relationship: noneI AM: dramaticI WANT: a lot of thingsI HAVE: problemsI WISH: for the hatred to stopI HATE: people who annoy meI FEAR: that i will lose my friends because of the way i acted the other day(knock on wood)I HEAR: the tvI WONDER: whats life like after deathI REGRET: what i did the other dayI LOVE: going to concertsI DANCE: my crazy danceI SING: when i feel like itI CRY: all the timeI WIN: rarelyI LOSE: alwaysI CONFUSE: everyoneI NEED: a smileI SHOULD: get ready for work

YES or NO

You keep a diary: i did...but then i got boredYou like to cook: yesYou have a secret you have not shared with anyone: yes

DO YOU?

Have a crush: fuck yeahWant to get married: yes but not nowGet motion sickness: rarelyThink you are a health freak: sometimesGet along with your parents: sometimesLike thunderstorms: sometimes

Number: 24Color: green, blue, and blackDay: 24Month:AugustSongs: A LOT!!!!!!!!!!!!Season: springDrink: water its good for you-no calories!

PREFERENCES:

Cuddle or make out: cuddleChocolate milk or hot chocolate: bothMilk, dark or white chocolate: white and milkVanilla or chocolate: chocolate

IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU

Cried? not in the last 24 hours...maybe 48 hoursHelped someone? yesBought something? no-no moneyGotten sick? noGone to the movies? noGone out for dinner? yesSaid I love you? i think soWritten a real letter? noTalked to an ex? no-i have no exsMissed an ex? noWritten in a journal? noHad a serious talk? noMissed someone? YESHugged someone? no

WOULD YOU EVER:

eat a bug: i think i haveBungee jump: no, but skydive hell ya!Kiss someone of the same sex: no Have sex with someone of the same sex: NOParachute from a plane: hell ya!Walk on hot coals: maybe, if my toes are frozenGo out with someone for the looks: yesBe a vegetarian: yaWear plaid with stripes: um...IM a stranger: yeah, i have beforeSing karaoke: sureGet drunk off your ass: haha depends...Shoplift: noRun a red light: not purposelyStar in a porn video: haha noDye your hair blue: ya...coolBe on survivor: noCheat on a test: noMake someone cry: not on purposeDate someone more that 10 years older than you: no thanks

20th November 2004

12:01am: i can see clearly now the rain has gone.....
yay im soo happy....ive had the shittiest week ever and tonight...im so happy....nothing can bring me down....haha well lets see i went to amoeba yesterday...as much as i want to forget about yesterday amoeba was filled with a lot of fucking hot guys...i gotta go back there again. i have nothing to update...thats really weird....i get some checks today....yay...thats always fun

13th November 2004

8:22pm: dearly beloved are you listening?
OMG!!!!THIS WEEKEND ROCKS! this has gotta be one of the best weekends ever-so far. a) my parents got a new car(a honda pilot!-ive wanted one for a while) so that means my dad gets the pilot, my mom gets my dads passat, and I get my moms honda.SCORE! i finally get a car...it may be old it may be crappy, but its mine..hahahahaha. b) i went to the everybody else concert at ucla yesterday-it was free and i got free crap too...and i bought a cool shirt. they totally rocked...i took pics on my camera phone and i recorded too...i might post it later cuz i dont feel like doing it now-too tired. but i talked to carrick and man did he look like a hot mother fucker.c) i saw the incredibles yesterday-it was funny...i liked it-and the movie was free too.d)i got a free bouquet of fake flowers-thanks mei...haha its soo cool haha i love playing with them.e) i went to hot topic and bought a VOTE FOR PEDRO pin! its sooo cool love it and i also bought new earrings for my cartilage.f)i went protesting yesterday with meiling while clare was working....it was so much fun giving people the peace sign while they honked. fun times.g)i went to the aquarium of the pacific today and yes after the first 2 hours i got bored cuz i saw everything there was to see BUT there were a ton of hot guys working there-for example justin(ahem clare),scott(big ears guy),new guy(samer), and hot rocker guy dad who doesnt work there but was just hot.but there was this guy neil and he had nice hair but i didnt think he was hot...its weird how i still remember this-kinda sad too.-but i dont like the lorikeets(sp?) one of them crapped on my shoe.and they scared the fucking shit out of me. i felt so smart cuz i knew a lot thanks to marine bio. yay!i think i had something else to say but i dont remember....damn i gotta get up early tomorrow cuz my dad wants me to drive everyone to church and after i can drive to work....i just wanna skip the church part.i dont wanna go to work im too tired.too much excitement for one weekend...ahhh if only all weekends were like this.

5th November 2004

10:49pm: my feet hurt...ouchies..
wow what a day...i walked the 10k walk earlier and i had to work...and not only did i work but i closed too. closing sucks ass cuz we have to stay a little later and do more work...we have to clean the counters the chiller machine..basically everything!im so sleeping in tomorrow...but i cant sleep forever cuz i have work at 1. that sucks.good luck to people taking sat IIs tom!i wont be one of them cuz im a lazy ass and i dont want to take it again.the shins are gonna be on jimmy kimmel tonight-from what i heard on kroq. my aunt went to watch the tonight show earlier.ugh i cant do college apps right now...what was i thinking.lets see what else is new...oh ya bush won the election....still pissed about that but im letting it go...since that fuckers gonna be here for another 4 fuckin years. bastard. i cant think right now...im too tired.peace!

31st October 2004

6:49pm: what's wrong with this world...
today was a horrible day...the main reason:work...is it too early for me to start hating work? theres this girl that i work with and shes a total bitch...sigh...i hated work..other than the fact that i had no energy cuz i barley ate cuz i wasnt hungry and what happened to me yesterday i was in no mood to work.i got paid though-from 2 weeks ago and this weekend im working all three days.i went to visit catlin after work and met this guy that went to my old school. i wanna go egg peoples houses-who wants to come with me.yesterday was ugh...i cant even begin to explain how horrible it was. i dont want to go to school tomorrow..damn.i wanna see team america!!!! i need to see team america! some people owe me a free movie(ahem*clareandcaitlin*endahem).i feel like the whole world hates me right now, it makes me quite sad. i couldve gone to a party yesterday but these fuckers also known as my parents wouldnt let me go.why i will never know.they made me feel like shit yesterday and they said all this crap which made me really sad and i cried about it-like i always do.im not very hungry tonight-its weird cuz lately i havent been hungry so i havent really been eating dinner.i dont know whats wrong for some reason i just cant eat.is that bad? i love listnening to coldplay-it calms me down...well technically all music(that i like) calms me down, but lately coldplay has been really ahhh.someone shoot me-my moms bitching again. about what i wouldnt know.she told me yesterday to sort out the crap i got from colleges if i dont might as well not go to college.ok she got made at me cuz i dont have time to sort out the crap from colleges?!?!?! she should be glad at least i put them in the fucking box she gave me for them.whatever man.damn i forgot what i was gonna say.my toes are frozen again.i need to go to more parties...berna send out the invitations for our invisible hotties party haha...life sucks man!

28th October 2004

9:05pm: HAPPY CANDY DAY!!!!!!!!
i was hyper earlier cuz i was on a major sugar high..but since my dad used the computer and closed my live journal and i didnt save what i typed...it was long too...damn. well ill try and remember...today i got a shitload of candy which was really cool...i love getting candy...but i need someone to remind me not to eat too much candy cuz a. im gona be really really really hyper and b. im gonna get a major tummy ache...it reminds me of when i was like 6 and i would eat so much candy that id actually spoiled my appetite and i didnt feel like eating dinner...which is what happened today.i ate so much candy today im gonna regret it for the rest of the year.ah well...i had a churro today too....i love churros-brings back memories...ever since i was little when i went to amusement parks i always had to get a churro...i love that tradition.my cell isnt working so my dads calling the fucking company trying to fix it cuz i cant receive fucking calls and now hes bitching cuz he missed the apprentice-i think it just started...i dunno...whatever man...does anyone know who sung the song under the boardwalk...its been in my head lately and i dont know who sung it and its driving me crazy...i need a party to crash...does anyone know of any i can crash? i hope i can watch team america this weekend...about an 3 hours ago i decided that i wanted to watch the grudge despite the weeks of protest. my feet are freezing again-theyve been freezing a lot lately....does that mean my blood isnt circulating...cuz someone told me that...i forget who though.i dont want to go to school tomorrow...it seems like a friday-maybe because we had free dress earlier and we didnt have formal on wednesday.i need to get a life. i watched the united states of leland and at first i was like ok?? but then i got into it and i liked it. damn what else was i gonna say...i updated like 2 hours ago and i was almost finished....damn...what should i dress up as for work?...sigh...any ideas...peace to the assholes!

23rd October 2004

10:13pm: ahh my foots asleep...a lot of things have been happening to my feet lately
so today i went to camarillo..fun fun fun...i got 2 new pairs of shoes...yay!well ones a pair of new loafers since my old ones are seriously jacked up. my weekend plans are cancelled...but its ok..im getting a new phone tomorrow...hopefully...i have to use my own money-i was gonna use that money to buy this dvd that i wanted but it can wait. today i went to ucsb and saw my brothers tae kwon do tournament...half the people there had a last name of kim...so when my mom told some guy my brothers master is master kim he was like which one...haha...we waited like 2-3 fucking hours before my brother competed and it took like 5 min. we ate at king bobs tonight...it was good...my dads having a christmas party in december and he wants us to buy formal clothes-cuz apparently we dont have enough/any.well earlier my dad kept carrying a water bottle around cuz he mightve gotten "shoppers fatigue" and needed water and its funny cuz ive never seen any guy shop like my dad. he seriously shops more than my mom does...its soo funny.i dont know what to be for halloween....any ideas? damn tomorrow i might have to go to church-my dad said thats if we can get up in time..but knowing us theres a 60% we might not...how come that fucking song by kelly clarkson is everywhere..ive heard it like 4 times today..and my sisters watching the video on the disney channel? that songs starting to annoy me.lately ive been obsessed with patrick fugit..well since i saw saved! i liked him better in almost famous...i love that movie.saved! reminds me of jesus freak-although ive never seen him but when i saw it i was like is that how his school is? lately ive also been obsessed with this show i usd to watch but only shows reruns now..(clare you're probably laughing your ass off)i read something interesting in someones lj today...it talked about our self esteem and how if we keep telling ourselves we're not good enough our mind will believe it too..it really made me think and i wanted to say thanks to his person who wrote this in their lj-you know who you are.well i was supposed to finish this entry cuz my mom needed to use the comp for a while....but she used it so long that i dont feel like finishing it and i have no idea what i was supposed to write anyways....oh well

20th October 2004

8:40pm: my feet are freezing
hello there...hello piece of blue crap on the side...today was a good day-i think..i dont really remember what happened...i cant wait till this weekend.CAMARILLO BABY! i have a feeling i was suppose to say something but as always i cant remember...oh ya i have to watch eternal sunshine...ii was suppose to watch it tonight but i dont know why i didnt.hey jimmy eat worlds cd came out yesterday...i wanna buy it.wow i really do use a lot of elipses...its becoming an addictive habit just like jessicas safdhlakkjlsdff haha thats so much fun you guys should try it sometime.since i have nothing else to say i think ill go...this is sad. i know i had some good news what was it?oh well.peace.long live shermanism!

17th October 2004

7:22pm: what is there to do on a sunday night?
damn what a life i have ive updated now more than ever.that is sad.today was the aids walk....fun fun fun...my legs were hurting and after the walk my cousin and i walked across the street to the beverly center and i went into american eagle and saw this beautiful skirt for $20 and like always i had no money and even if i did i wouldn buy it but my cousin offered to buy it for me and for some reason i said no.damn.earlier during the walk some korean punks kept spitting water up and it landed right at the people behind them-me being one of the people behind them and they threw theiur trash up in the air too and it landed on the other side of the street-where cars were passing. everyone-including me kept yelling at them and they spat the water up and it landed on me and i got fed up i got my water bottle and threw the rest of my water and them.i really did and they were like HEY and i was like bastards you dont like it huh...they didnt see me though they just felt the water and heard me-it was soo godd i aimed perfectly and got them all! and the people near me were like whohoo good job and this girl next to me tapped me and was like good job im right behind you...haha ya i was like fuckers....so my cousin and i walked ahead of them cuz she was afraid i was gonna start something.imagine that me starting something haha.it was cool though since the water was free so i just got more cuz people were passing them out as we walked. it was cool i guess...i fell asleep in the car and my cousin said we barely left and i fell asleep so i mustve been really tired...when i got home i rested for like an hour and then i had to vacuum the house...that was torture.i wish i lived in the 50s although many women didnt have any rights back then it wasnt as trashy as these days...oh well..i dont want to go to school tom....i hate mondays and tuesdays and wednesdays..basically everyday except saturdays and sometimes fridays and sometimes sundays...i changed my emotion icons...i really liked the one i had...i was gonna change it to aliens but i didnt like those so i changed to to whatever those blue things are...it looks like blue shit...it really does doesnt it? i think i got a windburn from earlier the top half of my cheeks are redder than usual and the only time that happens is when im dehydrated or when i have a windburn or when im sick.and i dont think im sick.i had the best nights sleep last night-i love it when it rains...its the best...i kinda want to go to work for 2 reasons a. so i can get paid more and b. so i can drive there.im going to santa barbara saturday...yay!..i love it there its so nice.oh i remember what i was going to say earlier i went to the aids walk and i got a free poster...i was like cool man...so ya this weekend was a very kerry weekend...ok ya that was really lame...i think i really am psychic...ill charge $5 for a reading haha...i should do that haha...fast cash...ive been reading peoples minds all weekend...more than usual.cool! i have a gift...haha cool man...

16th October 2004

10:45pm: i update too much....
salutations my friends...today i spent the day in pasadena...old town to be specific.mym cousin bought me 2 kerry/edwards pins...i was soo happy...i also got a balloon and sticker that said kerry/edwards.i also saw this old man and his son earlier and they dressed like clowns trying to sell balloons....it made me so sad cuz the son was asking his dad why no one bought a balloon and his dad was like patience...and the son was like 6 or 7 or something it made me so sad i started getting teary eyed.i wouldve given them money but out of all days i didnt have any money at all! and my cousin didnt have spare change to give...it was the saddest thing ever i'll never forget them...i told my mom and she told me thats why i have to work hard so i can have some money to give those people....there was also this other family that were selling roses and the father came up to me asking me to buy one...he stopped me so my cousinw as ahead of my signaling me to follow but i couldnt..well anyways the dad asked me to buy one and i said i didnt have any money...and hes like we have no money too i have to send my kids to school etc etc...he was getting mad at me....i was like dude im not lying..he scared me and made me mad at the same time its like if you want money dont get mad at them...even if i did have money i wouldve given it to the father and son...and normally i dont like clowns...but i like those clowns...it made me really sad....i felt so bad after i saw them...peace to the father and son!anyways..other than that my day was ok...tomorrows the aids walk...i should be watching team america but im not...its raining...finally! ive been waiting all night for it to rain...omg my rain dance worked...im so good at this...my rain dance always works haha...and im officially a psychic....i can read minds-ask my cousin she's my new believer.i use a lot of elipses...sorry that was random.damn college applications...i guess thats it for now...peace.

15th October 2004

10:44pm: life is good....for now
I GOT MY LICENSE!!!!! finally...ha so i dont have to lie to my mom about my secret rides.i wanna see team america for some reason...AIDS WALK SUNDAY! yall better be going...earlier at school i got trampled all over cuz of the tug of war....my legs were all dirty...it wasnt pretty seeing a bunch of asses and not being able to see the sky anymore...but it was all good...im doing absolutely nothing tomorrow...well...i think im going to pasadena with my cousin...we went to visit clare at her work earlier haha...for some reason i want people that i know to visit me at work...all my coworkers might think that im a big fat loser with no friends...well i would let certain people visit me at work before if i knew they wouldnt laugh at me and if they didnt work the same days i do-you know who you are...damn im gonna be on a major sugar high tonight...damn i want an ipod...i really need to start saving and stop spending my money.i dont think anything else new happened today...lets see...hmm...wow my life is pretty boring...what should i be for halloween-any ideas...someone give me an idea this isnt a rhetorical question...someone give me an idea...tonight was a nice night...it was cool and yet not too cold...sorry i had to say that..damn im all wide awake...i think i took a nap when i came home but i dont remember....did i? whats there left to say? um...does anyone have emus or ugg(sp?) boots or whatever the fuck they're called....they are like heaven for your feet i swear.they kept my toes nice and warm when i went out earlier and it was quite chilly...there nothing to do...damn...im updating and looking at myspace at the same time...some life i have huh...i guess thats it for one day...word to the losers...peace

13th October 2004

Listen to the mustn'ts, child.Listen to the don'ts.Listen to the shouldn'ts,The impossibles, the won'ts.Listen to the never haves,Then listen close to me ...Anything can happen, child.Anything can be.~ Shel Silverstein

Six years ago today, Matthew Shepard was murdered for being homosexual.

ok sorry for this post but i am really mad right now!ok i had a great day today-i saw shaun of the dead which i thought was funny..and i ate at the elephant bar!....which was delicious...so why am i pissed off you may ask...well my mom found out my means of transportation earlier....which she wasnt too pleased about...and she went into her mood....then she looked at my grad pics and kept saying no..no..no...she didnt like any of them...i was like shit am i that fucking ugly....it made me sad....its so sad my parents always criticize me...its like fucker why dont you ever do anything right....yup get that everyday..its kinda routine for me...but ya i felt sad that my mom had that look on her face like...why is my daughter so ugly...damn if only she were prettier kind of look...it made me soo sad...although i did look like shit in my pictures-which goes to show i do look like crap in pictures and no matter what anyone says i am NOT photogenic(sp?)...i dont even know why im mad...i guess the pressures just been too much lately...i mean how sad is it that what i do is never good enough for my parents....thats why im so afraid to tell them what i want to major in....oh ya my dads bitching again...do you have to go online every single day...yes i do...thats my black hole....its like how much of a shithole can one person take...lately its been too much...and they're always speaking for me-like they know me so well...truth is they dont know shit about me..half the info they tell people are wrong and i always end up correcting them...i know its rude...but if you wanna speak for me at least say the truth and dont lie...shit i had a feeling i had to do something here....but due to my rage i cant remember...no wonder its hard for me to be optimistic....i think im going in circles again...damn....i think ill listen to music now...oh right my moms in my room with my brother...cuz they cant use any other room...fuckers...thanks for telling me...god someone save me from this and just shoot me now...sigh..i think ill add more songs to my mp3 player...thatll take some of my anger away...ugh..

11th October 2004

6:27pm: goodbye...nice to know you!
i love coldplay...haha i was trying to update and me being the retard that i am accidentally clicked the add friend button and when i saw add friend i was like wtf....and then i realized i clicked the wrong button.today was ok-i dont think i have anything to complain about-which is a surprise.I CAN'T WAIT TILL FEBRUARY-LBMI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am so excited and i just cant hide it...im about to lose control and i think i like it...haha OMG! whats wrong with me-the sugar or is it lack of sugar? im hyper either because of sugar or lack of sugar...wow i love listening to music. does anyone know a good place to download songs..i found this great site but i forgot what it was...all the ones ive used so far have been crappy...i completely forgot i updated yesterday and i was gonna repeat what i wrote yesterday...tomorrows caitlins b-day. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAITLIN!!!!!!!tomorrow i think ill wear a hat to school if i feel like it cuz its crazy hat day tom....i got the bag from the walk...haha clare....jk..earlier i was talking to clare during lunch and wtf sally sue kept staring at us..ok fucker we werent talking about you so why are you staring at us-maybe its cuz she has a big lesbian crush on bonnie jo(sp?) who is a ho (sp?)haha...ya...i cant wait till wed...elephant bar baby! ive never been there and ive been dying to go there....i cant wait....yippeeeee.....whohoooo.....aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!god what is wrong with me...i wanna go crazy..oh ya i forgot i am crazy.....hehe....oh god.....oh btw i found a name for my religion...its shermanism-i named it after sherman floyd...SHERMAN FLOYD!.....ya i needed a name for it...shermanism is half atheist and half i make it up as i go along...who wants to be a follower...i can be very persuasive....ask clare she'll agree...hehe.... LONG LIVE SHERMANISM!

10th October 2004

5:24pm: my feet hurt....
hello my fellow amigos....im so tired from work....it got busy all of a sudden....i went to go visit caitlin during my break...but got lost before i got there-twice....how sad...sigh...i bought keanes cd-i wanted interpols too but i didnt have enough money...i got paid today!!!!!!!major shopping for me..i got spin and filter magazine yesterday...franz and interpol! i cant wait till december-a certain band is having a certain concert-and im gonna be in the pit....keeping my fingers crossed.wednesday is half day. yay!!!!so what else is new....hmm..well im not working the next 2 weeks-maybe the next 3 weeks. yay? im not sure if i should be sad or glad...i actually talked to my co workers today. they are all so cool and so nice that i actually wanna go back to work.ugh tomorrows monday. school NOOOO!!!!aids walk next sunday.i cant wait to go...i better see yall there too....jk...wow my minds buzzing...i think it was the starbucks i had earlier...damn...i had a feeling i was supposed to say something else...but like always i cant remember.ahhhhhh....hehe felt like doing that....wow i didnt have any sugar today and im on a sugar high-im tired but yet i have so much energy..theres something im lloking forward to friday but yet im scared-cuz i know im not gonna get it...sigh...i think thats enough for one day...peace

6th October 2004

9:03pm: college applications suck ass!
damn..i hate college apps...wow i have nothing to say...lets see...oh sally sue cut her hair and wow...thats all i have to say...damn i have a marine bio test tomorrow and i dont wanna take it...i cant wait till next week-i dont wanna jinx anything so i should shut up...earlier i had a nice nap during women in lit while we were watching a movie. damn i can never sleep in my first 2 periods..caitlin you are so lucky...damn you....damn sunday i have to get to work super early cuz we have a fucking store meeting and then i have 2 hours with nothing to do until my shift starts...they better as hell let me change out of my uniform cuz im not walking around the mall with my uniform for 2 hours...work last weekend was....ugh...people can be so stupid...do they not know how to order..there are only like 3 things on the menu...wtf...monday we started filming our movie..yay....i think its cool so far...i saw a video from 2 years ago when we went to the la zoo for our field trip...we all look younger and our voices were squeakier haha...fun times...damn sats this sat....im not ready...is it too late to cancel it?...for some reason ive been screaming a lot lately...more than usual...i scream about everything-i blame it on my cousin cuz she screams a lot...sigh...i think thats it for today my head is starting to spin...maybe the shins will keep me company tonight

30th September 2004

6:10pm: lifes a bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
god i just found out that my plans for monday are gonna be canceled cuz i cant shut my mouth to save my life.ugh....i was looking forward to it all week.i'm seriously thinking of becoming an atheist.it's like everything that i look forward to or want the most gets taken away from me...i wanna talk to god to ko what i didto deserve this....was i such a bitch in my past life?am i such a bitch now?i know people who are bitchier than i am but their lives are perfect.fuckers.why?!?!?!?!?!?!and ive been so moody today because of you know what.-you prob dont but....anyways...fuck...i feel like shit right now...im prob making an ass of myself but i dont give a damn...why does everyone tell me that everything happens for a reason...i know that...someone tell me something i dont know...like the reason...god...no one has to read this if they dont want to but i feel like acting like a bitch..im sick and tired of being nice and polite and crap when a lot of people have it easier they're a bitch and they're rude.lately i just dont give a damn..im starting to act ruder and meaner cuz being nice and polite hasnt gotten me anywhere...someone tell me where its gotten them-or me and then maybe ill reconsider...school sucks ass...god my life is-as my sister calls it "unsatisfying" i know everyone hates their home life...i really hate it...i guess its cuz of my lack of privacy and the fact that my parents were raised in the fucking philippines so they had to be strict...im never gonna jhave kids....kids are a pain in the ass...ugh i think ive been enough of a bitch for one day...i need so fresh air...maybe ill go for a walk...

29th September 2004

8:38pm: why does life have to be so hard?
yesterday i got some terrible news....lifes just one bad news after another isnt it?or is it just my life.sigh......i cant stop thinking about it..today i tried not to cry...sometimes in class a tear or two would drop..im such a wimp...i hate being the oldest child-my cousin said that oldest girls are very emotional...damn...the hives are having a concert in december....omg i have to go to that...im still pissed that i couldnt go in august cuz i was out of town...but since theyre having another concert..yay!i cant wait till monday...haha commander greenleaf! yay...oh and i finally get to wash meilings car! yesss!!!!! my dream has come true...someone pinch me...haha...im so lazy...crap sats are next week....shit.im tired of taking that crap...everyone already knows where im gonna end up..pcc man...for 2 years and then god knows where...haha has anyone seen scrubs...its so funny...my dad gave me this article to read one day..it was about a man who talked to god cuz god imed him...and he asked how come he(god) doesnt answer his prayers and god said he he never leaves a question unanswered...sometimes the answer is no...i just thought about it for a while..my dads been taking meditation classes and hes taching me about life..its weird coming from my dad...but i like this side of my dad...but now hes flipping out cuz hes like are you doing your hw or are you just iming your friends. ok i take back what i said about my dad cuz hes pissing me off now...i need time to think...does anyone have any good meditating tips...i think ill ask meiling...shit ok now i wanna strangle my dad cuz he wont shut the fuck up...was i talking to you no...shit....what happened to his meditating thing....i think he threw it out the window.....bastard...

26th September 2004

4:57pm: what the fuck happened to lj?
ok what happened- i read in other peooles lj about the crappy change and didnt notice it until now-cuz i havent updated till now and ya i dont like it.today i had work-it was ok....not soo bad but i found out that i work with a bunch of people in college and i actually work with 3 guys and not just 2.so that makes the male female ratio 1:6.a lot of hispanics and filipinos go to the burbank mall on sundays-what happened to all the hot white guys that were there friday....damn...yesterday was fun...didnt get home till like 1 something and when i got home my dad didnt even get mad....but my sister told me my moms mad cuz i got home that late....shit...school tomorrow NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!im hungry....i guess one cheese on a stick isnt enough to fill a person up. damn i have to get started on applications and shit i still have to study for the sat...fucker i dont want to take it anymore...shit! i want it to be june or at least april or may....i need to go to a concert....my life is starting to bore me again...i need something to do...sigh...

18th September 2004

5:13pm: is anyone else feeling happy today?
I CHANGED MY LAYOUT!!!! im so happy cuz its been taking me forever and ever...and i love my icon..haha....makes me laugh....i just realized that when i post something natalie portmans face is mostly cut out..haha well as long as i can see zach braff then im happy....i bought the garden state soundtrack yesterday!!! its soo good. my dad bought me coldplays cd today too-i was supposd to pay him back but he told me i didnt have to.i start work on friday yay! theres nothing much to say today...ive been taking a lot of naps lately..i guess im really tired-but i dont know why...i blame it on school haha..

13th September 2004

5:02pm: yellow squire!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OMG we went to medieval times yesterday and boy did i have fun...the yellow squire was soo fuckin fine....and the black and white squire was hot too...but hes caitlins...i waved at him and he waved back...clare and i were on a sugar high or something....we kept yelling..it was soo much fun...i wanna go back..and i didnt know they were called squires so before i kept calling them helpers...id be like yellow helper!....i creeped out the family sitting next to me...haha god they were soo hot..i liked the squires more than the knights...ah well....i gotta go back there...haha...i find it soo funny how we each called our own guy...I GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!....im so happy earlier i got the call and clare and i kept jumping and screaming people thought we were seriously disturbed or something...omg the other night when i went to the grove my cousin,my sister, and i ate at johnny rockets...and then while we were there some security guy came in and shouted everyone get out..at first i thought he was kidding but it runs out there was a bomb threat across the street or something...i kept laughing cuz people ran out with their food and drinks and it was funny...we didnt even pay for our food-my cousin was like order whatever you want no matter how much it is-cuz she wasnt feeling well so she wanted to binge...and we ordered so much and it was all free haha....there was also this hot guy that worked there,my cousin was like ask him whats going on nows your chance to talk to him....but he was on the phone..why do people at johnny rockets have their phones with them?!?!?!i jus went on the the vh1 website to see all the guys auditioning to play keith..haha....damn it shows again at like 11 tonight...i dont think ill be up to watch it...well i looked at the pics and only 2 or 3 looked really hot...it could just be or me it could be the pics...i really gotta watch the show...damn..i wanna know if they have classes at like gcc or something where i can psychoanalyze myself...does anyone know where i can take classes?..i dont feel like doing my hw although i dont have much to do today...wow i think i have senioritis...damn...

9th September 2004

8:39pm: does anyone own drumsticks?
wow its been a while since i last updated....right now im enjoying my jamba juice and i decided to update my journal.tomorrows welcome day...yay!..everyone can see my enthusiasm(in a sarcastic tone)...i dont think ill do my hw tonight since my lazy ass doesnt feel like getting up and getting it...i recently discovered zach braffs blog-thanks to marilen and its soo funny...hes hot and funny...if onyl he was in a band seriously that would be the best....but he has good taste in music so i guess thats ok too...oh other than the fact that hes like almost 30...kinda gross.school is.....eh....fun but i just feel lazy...the heat is messing with my head. the other day i had the worst day of my life...and clare kept counting all the bad shit thats happened,there were a lot of them but i dont feel like mentioning any of them right now.i went to san fran this past weekend and it was awesome...monday i had an interview with hot dog on a stick and i got another interview again...i saw the manchurian candidate cuz we had to for women in lit...and that shit is scary...clare and i kept jumping throughout the movie and caitlin just kept laughing at us-thanks a lot caitlin...i finally ate at johnny rockets and i had the best malt ever....yum...i also met this girl i used to go to school with and she actually remembered me...how cool...ahhh i just got a brain freeze from the jamba juice...ahhh...lets see the dance is tom...and caitlin cant go cuz she has work-which totally sucks...i talked to a friend of mine and he said hes going..he actually asked me if i was going and i was like wtf are you talking about...haha im so clueless...seriously i dont think i even live in glendale cuz lately ive been so oblivious to the things that have been going around...its quite sad actually...my dad just came home from back to school night and hes quite pleased with all my classes and my teachers...i am too...i guess things do work out for the best...i like all my teachers and all my classes are mucho fun...i just get lazy...i think i have senioritis....damn ive had it for like ever i think...my mom preaches about it...shes like your soo smart how come you dont try harder...and shit like that...and i tell her i dont cuz i choose not to,so technically i have no right to complain about my grades and crap cuz i know i can do better but i just choose to settle for mediocre...sigh...but this year my grades are actually really good...i guess its cuz school started...but whatever...wait a few months from now if im still doing this well id be really surprised.i just realized the perfect girl for tyler-i already told you caitlin....haha on her user info she wrote GOD PIMPS MY RIDE...you dont see that everyday..haha i just had to laugh when i read that...my dad wants me to go to sleep now..does he not know that its only 9:12 and i dont sleep for like another hour and a half...yay i got drumsticks-thanks to christine..i can finally pull of meg white and if someone asks who the hell i am i can show the drumsticks...cool...this seems hella long...i think its all the ellipses....reminds me of garden state...tomorrow st francis has a football game but im not going cuz we're going to the dance at our school...my sisters been such a bitch lately god its so annoying..haha reminds me of the horoscope thing clare caitlin and i read...scorpios(meiling)are sexual...vigos(me) are bitchy...leos(clare)are creative and narcissistic...libras(caitlin)are lovable and charming and taurus'(jennifer) dont like change...ya im bored...ya...the jokes in the book were hilarious though ...how many _______ does it take to change a lightbulb? and theres different answers and they're all true too...haha fun times..i think thats enough excitement for one night...peace yall

29th August 2004

1:11pm: school tom...ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
yesterday i went to watch garden state...that movie is soo funny....zach braff....what a hottie!..omg i saw the abercrombie guy that works at hot topic yesterday and did a little stalking....seriously he is soo hot..except he smokes which a lot of hot guys do but it makes him less appealing....but still very hot...i bought 3 cds with the gift card clare gave me for my b-day....but it wasnt enough so i paid the rest in cash..i bought jet,the violent femmes, and the red hot chili peppers greatest hits cd....i was soo happy...i applied at starbucks and at manns so hopefully one of them will call...lately ive been wearing my tiara around the house..which my sister makes fun of me for..but its so cool-thanks clare!what should i be for welcome day....anyone have any ideas...if i have nothing else to be then ill be daria....since i really like her black skirt...ahh school tomorrow...its not that schools bad..well my classes arent so bad this year but the fact that we have to wake up early every morning to go to school kinda sucks...arent the vmas tonight...i dunno if im gonna watch it...does anyone know who the host is...is its some really crappy then i most likely wont watch it...oh i got my nails french painted...haha its so not like me...haha my cousin painted them for me and it makes me feel so girly...like my sister...now thats disturbing...my dads watching pimp my ride and i think he regrets giving my cousin his old car...haha...yesterday my dad and i went out to practice driving-like most saturdays and i found out a lot of drivers in glendale are mean...or just really bad drivers...i forgot to bring my permit and i realized that once we came home...im tired and i dont even know why...