Relationships

How diet and weight loss affects your relationship

Relationships

How diet and weight loss affects your relationship

The holidays are one of the most difficult times of the year: We celebrate with an overconsumption of food and drink, then often take a pledge to lose all of the extra pounds gained (and maybe more) when January rolls around. Some of us will succeed and some of us will not. Some of us will carry around some extra weight for the next few months and some of us will shed it all -- and more.

But what happens when one partner keeps on a few extra pounds? What happens when one loses even more than planned? In a society that's so driven by appearances, how does weight really affect our relationships?

For a deeper look into some of the challenges faced by couples when one partner experiences a significant weight change, we turned to couples counsellor Adrienne Bairstow.

1. Realize it will be an adjustment for both of you There will always be challenges for couples, and issues pertaining to weight are part of those. When one partner gains a noticeable amount of weight, problems are more likely to arise for the person who has gained the weight, rather than their partner, says Bairstow.

"The person who gains the weight might be unhappy, not feel attractive, or might be reluctant to be intimate. Often the other partner is OK with it, although there may be some concerns about the partner's health, which can lead to all sorts of concerns about whether their partner will be around in the future." When it comes to weight loss, on the other hand, things tend to be a little different. "It often depends if the weight loss is healthy or not," says Bairstow. "And it depends on the other partner, if they are overweight or not. They may start to feel more insecure."

Overall, however, Bairstow emphasizes that healthy weight loss, whether for one or both partners, can often have a positive impact on a relationship, as the person starts to feel more attractive and better about themselves, and has more energy to invest in living well, together.Page 1 of 3 -- Uncover the real issues behind your partner's desire to lose weight on page 22. Ensure you know what the real issues are"When dealing with this sort of situation, I always want to know what is really distressing each person," says Bairstow. "If one partner says, 'I'm no longer attracted to you because of your weight gain,' I think there is something else at the root of this problem."

When one member of a couple experiences an extreme body transformation and the other partner takes it negatively, there is often something deeper going on. The other partner may be concerned for their significant other's health (with regards to extreme gains or losses) or about their own health (particularly if he or she is overweight).

"(Weight) is a loaded issue in our society and people don't know how to deal with it. And it can manifest itself negatively with nasty comments," says Bairstow. Make sure you take the time to discuss, as a couple, what kind of impact the changes are having for you -- both good and bad. 3. Make sure your communication stays strong"The issue of weight has so much shame in our society," says Bairstow. "The last thing anyone wants for their partner is feelings of shame. Communication is essential in finding ways to address these concerns."

Having a strong communication base is important in any relationship, but broaching touchier subjects, such as weight, requires even more patience and understanding. Approaching the topic as a health concern is a good way to ease the blow of the weight conversation, says Bairstow.

Make sure that there is an emphasis on how much you care for and love your partner, and how you are simply looking out for their best interests. Never put a negative spin on the subject of weight: There is already too much pressure to be a certain size, and your partner doesn't need to feel it from you as well.Page 2 of 3 -- Discover easy ways to get healthy as a couple on page 3

4. Set out a challenge as a couple There is no better way to ensure that weight gain or loss does not hurt your relationship than to set out on a "get healthy" goal together. And there is no better time of year to start than now!

"Losing weight together is a great way for couples to bond," says Bairstow. "There is the opportunity to learn something new together, and it is a great way to stay connected." Even resolving to take a short walks together, as little as once a week, will go a long way for your relationship and your waistline," says Bairstow. "It is also great because you can support each other. When one person is having a rough time, the other person can motivate them, and vice versa."

Being healthy and happy are goals we all wish to achieve, and you deserve to be both of those things in your relationship. Remember that your partner fell in love with you, not your pant size. Don't ever forget that.

Contests

Our 60-Day Holiday Countdown Giveaway is on!

From November 2 to December 31, 2016, we're giving away weekly prizes (for a total value of over $15,000) as part of our 60-Day Holiday Countdown.

For easy access to our weekly prizes, sign up for our 60-Day Holiday Countdown newsletters and you'll receive a daily email featuring a link to enter that week's contest, along with Tested Till Perfect holiday recipes, awesome gift guides, DIY decor ideas and more. You can enter to win each prize once daily until each contest closes.

You can enter to win this week's prize below, and see past contests and winners.

Beauty

These lip balms will make you forget dry, chapped lips

Beauty

These lip balms will make you forget dry, chapped lips

Cold temperatures and harsh winds can take a toll on your lips—and there is nothing sexy about a chapped mouth. The good news? Our favourite lip balms can help eliminate dry, sore and chapped lips. These affordable picks range from $4 to $32.

Culture & Entertainment

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

Culture & Entertainment

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

Whether you're on the hunt for a thoughtful gift that's sure to impress or simply a gift that can be delivered, your answer is easy: Go for subscription boxes.

They're trending hard in the gift department. So, what are subscription boxes exactly? Basically, there's a company out there (yes—in Canada, too!) that will bundle up specific things you're interested in and deliver them in a package right to your door. No matter what your thing is—beauty, sweets, wine, more wine—there's a subscription box for you.

Think about the people on your list and narrow down what makes them tick. Beauty buff? Get her a subscription to GLOSSYBOX. Goop-enthusiast? Mama Earth Organics. Coffee Lover? The Roasters Pack. Sweet tooth victim? Bakers Krate.

Treat your mom to Oh Mother's boxes, which will deliver pampering products to ensure she gets a little "me" time. For your daughter, Ellebox will help her get through that gloomy time of month, for the bookworm, Owl Box offers new young adult books and fun extras, and for the relative who's going through a difficult time, Caring Crate will help keep their spirit up.

And there's still plenty more subscription boxes to choose from.

Flip through the slideshow to find out some of the best boxes available to Canadians and learn about what each one has to offer.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the Gwyneth in the group

Perfect for the Gwyneth-type—the one who juggles it all and is devoted to healthy, organic goods—will go crazy for this monthly subscription service. Mama Earth Organics offers healthy foods and fresh produce from local organic farms and will deliver right to her door.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the one who can't come home for the holidays

Ensure your friend who's out-of-the-country doesn't get too homesick this holiday season with Expack's Canada box. It boasts classic Canadian treats—like ketchup chips, Coffee Crisps, and Flakies—that are beloved by everyone north of the border.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the one with the sweet tooth

She'll probably be equally happy and mad at this gift: Bakers Krate delivers locally-sourced freshly baked goods (including cookies, brownies, and cupcakes), made by Canadian artisans, right to her front door.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the beauty buff

Help your beauty-loving bestie stay in-the-know with the classic, latest and greatest beauty finds with GLOSSYBOX. It brings makeup, hair, and skincare products to consumers’ doorsteps around the globe.

12 scrumptious gingerbread recipes you should make to celebrate the holiday season

Gingerbread Cottages

You will need a 23- x 17-inch (58 x 43 cm) cake board or other sturdy surface for the base. Having a few cottages means three sets of little hands can personalize their own houses, making it a great family project!