i think you have really good ideas, but sometimes there is too much information at one time. The story is really goo though and you have some great descriptions in there. I especially liked "his eyes smouldered..."

Ahhhh I've got to know whats gonna happen!! is he a Death eater or what?!!!

Author's Response: You'll just have to wait and see my friend. Well actually you'll probably find out before everyone else but even then your still going to have to wait until I figure out what's going to happen myself.