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Private Practice Review: "Heaven Can Wait"

After being away for the longest time (and almost making us forget all the bad stuff), Private Practice came back last night in the usual fashion with "Heaven Can Wait."

People we thought we knew turned out to be shadows of their former selves, handsome Latino doctors stroked our cheek, and our waspy mother formed the phrase, "Thank you."

Hell hath frozen over, for Bizzy Montgomery is in love.

Her longtime (and secret) lover, Susan, is ill with ovarian cancer, and after a successful surgery, Addison and Dr. Rodriguez believe they have cured her. On the day of her wedding to Bizzy, Susan reveals to Addison that she believes the cancer is back, only to pass out on the dance floor later that night.

Sheldon has to deal with a colleague who's developed a heavy dependency on prescription drugs. This hits home for Sheldon mainly because he looked up to this doctor and his revolutionary dealings with "talk therapy." After his friend suffers a very public psychotic breakdown, Sheldon makes the difficult decision to report him to the police.

Despite her uncomfortable therapy session with Sheldon's friend, Charlotte slowly learns to rebuild a life that was disrupted by her rapist. And Addison is learning not to be frightened and run away when things in her relationship get rough. We'll see how that pans out.

I find Addison to be selfish and impulsive when it comes to relationships.

She married Derek, then carried on with his best friend. Then she moved to Los Angeles and tried a few men on there. Then she developed feelings for Sam, who is her best friend's ex-husband, but then started dating Pete. THEN she decided that she really wanted to be with Sam and had to break the news to Naomi.

There's something so self-centered about Addison that makes me want to just... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I also dislike when Addison inhales deeply after a run-on sentence. It's the WASP in her. I know she can't fight it, but why does she have to do it so often?

When I first saw Sheldon's psychiatrist friend write Charlotte a scrip for five months worth of anti-depressants, I thought it was a dream. I kept thinking to myself, "This is far too unethical for the FCC to condone. There has to be a catch." Oh, but there was.

The debate over whether or not we humans are machines was quickly put to bed at a lovely restaurant with white tablecloths. Dr. Feel-Good takes a handful of pills, Dr. Concerned confiscates the pills and confronts Dr. Feel Good, and Dr. Feel Good goes off the deep end, taking the table cloth and silverware with him.

It ended badly, but proved to us that prescription drugs are not Skittles.

I don't know how Naomi manages to look Addison in the eye every day, let alone speak to her. The moment Addison told her that she was seeing Sam, their friendship changed. Addison is dating Naomi's ex-husband, and there are a million things wrong with that.

Addison still thinks she can come to Naomi and talk about her relationship problems, but that's simply not the case anymore. Get a clue, Monty.

Things I Thought About To Distract Me From The Dangerously Good Looks Of Dr. Rodriguez

Please tell me Bizzy and Susan's first dance was NOT to Metro Station's "Shake It." Who was the music supervisor for this scene? Did he or she get a copy of the script beforehand?

Raise your hand if you think Addison is going to hook up with Dr. Rodriguez.