Theater Review: 'Sparkley' fails to spark at Cap Rep

ALBANY -- The main reason, and perhaps the only reason, to attend "The Sparkley Clean Funeral Singers" at Capital Repertory Theatre is if you enjoy spending 2-1/2 hours with people whose lives are worse than your own.

And, trust me; the characters in "Sparkley" have sad lives. Thirty-five years ago, the mother walked away from her family and the effect of that abandonment still impacts their lives.

The father, Lyle Lashley, has Alzheimer's and every time he sees a female he thinks she is his lost wife.

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Junie is his caretaker and runs the family dry cleaning business. She has almost no sense of self. She's almost given up her musical career in which she was little more than a back-up singer to her more talented sister. That sister, with the improbable name of Lashley Lashley, is a drunk who just left rehab, completely unrehabilitated.

Pastor Phil suggests the two work together at his funeral services to sing what are, essentially, musical eulogies. Pastor Paul has troubles of his own. He's a heavily in debt, an addicted gambler who is separated from his wife and has guilt issues when dealing with women. Naturally, the sisters both fall for him.

If this sounds like the lyrics of the worst country song you've ever heard, you are on the right track. Though the situation might sound comical, it is played with deadly seriousness and is more a lament than a joyous musical.

Indeed, a major problem with "Sparkley" is it has no clarity of purpose. There are weak attempts at humor, and the drama is without redemption -- no moral lessons are learned throughout what seems a very long evening.

The music is random. One song tries to develop a character, another is placed for what appears no purpose other than an attempt at entertainment. The style fits a show that fails to work as a character study (individually or collectively). Not only are the characters vague, they are difficult to care about.

The performances are as erratic as is the script. As Lashley, Carter Calvert is a phenomenal singer, but she is a stiff, unconvincing actress.

Lori Fischer (who wrote the book and co-wrote the music and lyrics) is an ingratiating Junie, but because she appears to be such a weak woman, it is difficult to care about the passive character. One of the best segments is her effort to sing as a lead singer.

The men are weakly written so as to be devices more than characters.

The best to be said about Jesse Lenat's Pastor Phil is he keeps the weak man from being unlikable. And, as the father, Reathel Bean is fine portraying a man with Alzhiemer's, who has enough moments of clarity to permit him to sing a couple of songs.

"Sparkley" isn't sparkly. The kindest description of this world premiere musical is it is a work in progress that needs a lot of work.