My job is not suited to my school studies

Topic: Concentration

Question

November 17, 2013

Nice work , Im motivated 100% by your messages. I'm a working student and my work are not suited of what I am studying, I can't get out here because my tuition are depend in this company , in short this is my source of income.

Thank you very much ! You motivate me a lot!! (-:

Jason - Philippines

24203

Answer

Often students will be working in areas other than their main interest. Typically, once the student graduates, he can seek a better job in his area a interest. However, if the company is paying for the tuition, they usually expect the person to continue working for number of years.

It is a good idea to look within your company to see if there are future positions that would better suit your education and interests. If there is nothing in this company, you can look for work elsewhere when you graduate. But it is important to do a good job in your present position, such that you will get a positive recommendation and reference.

Where can I attend to the firewalking seminar?

Topic: Firewalk

Question

July 26, 2012

Hi,Where can I attend to the firewalking seminar?Thanks in advance!

Juliana - Sweden

22803

Answer

You might check the Swedish Firewalking site for information. They provide training in firewalking, but they may be able to tell where there are some seminars. It is always good to have some message behind the experience.

What is the role of confidence?

Topic: Confidence

Question

December 28, 2010

1 roll of comfidenc to be a more social?2 how can be valuable for others?3 goal in small unit means?At last, everyone should have comfident according to there achivments which is truly valuable and dicriminate from others less comfidence is better then ugly. What do you think? Thanx and 'HAPPY NEW YEAR'

Vinod - India

20922

Answer

If you feel confident and sure of yourself, other people can see that. It makes you more attractive to them. However, some people can act over-confident, such that they seem arrogant. That gives a poor impression. You need just the right amount of confidence.

If you have an idea of what other want and can offer it, you will appear to be valuable to them. If someone needs help and you offer to give that help, you are valuable. Often people simply want someone to listen to them and to show them respect. Someone who can provide that is considered valuable to them.

Confidence really comes from acknowledging your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. It builds up from small to big.

I'm afraid to make mistakes in English

Topic: Fear

Question

November 15, 2010

Am always affriad of faceing the crowd. fear of making mistake in my english

MARIAM - Nigeria

20693

Answer

Many people are afraid of speaking to a group, especially if they fear making some sort of mistake. However, you should not take yourself so seriously and be willing to admit occasional mistakes in your English. A good expression to say, when you do make a mistake is, "Forgive me for the mistake. I guess I was speaking to rapidly." No one will think less of you if you admit a mistake as opposed to trying to be perfect.

See our lesson on "Overcome the Fear of Speaking to Groups" at:http://www.school-for-champions.com/speaking/fear.htm

Negative self talk affecting career goals

Topic: Champion Questions

Question

February 12, 2010

I do understand everything about being a champion, but what happen if someone like me who find it hard to choose the career to follow. i have lost it, no longer confident, always talking negetive thoughts towards me, there is this inner person always pulling me down in what everything i m trying to do, low selfesteem.

Askes - South Africa

19205

Answer

Is often difficult for people to find the right career to follow. The best way to find a direction is to take stock in yourself. Make a list of things and activities you really enjoy doing. Also list things that you are good at doing. Include subjects in school where you received a good grade.

This should give you an idea of the type of job that you would enjoy doing and would be to at doing. However, it is sometimes difficult to find a job where you can do the things you enjoy.

A good thing to do is to talk to other people and tell them how you would like to find a job doing these things you enjoy. You may get some good suggestions.

Being critical of yourself either means that you are being unrealistic in seeking perfection or that you have a bad habit in self-criticism. Don't judge yourself. Instead, look towards things you will enjoy doing. If you enjoy it, you are usually good at it, and it will help to gain your confidence.

I hope these ideas help. Best wishes in finding the type of job that will provide enjoyment and a good income.

Help me get more confident in speaking to my class

Topic: Confidence

Question

October 1, 2009

helloi was wondering if you could help me get more confident i have to stand in front of my class and give a description on a made up project i also have to go into assemblies at some point and talk to year 7's 8's 9's 10's and 11's i find talking to big groups of people very difficult and i need a way to get over this fear please write back asap thank you.

regards

James - UK

18418

Answer

The more you do an activity, the more confident you get with that activity. That is why it is good to practice in a safe environment to build up your confidence. Also, when you do things successfully, give yourself some positive feedback and praise. Say to yourself, "Good job, James." That reinforces things.

When you are going to make a presentation or speech to any group, you must practice it many times. Note that an actor does not go on stage without many rehearsals.

See our lesson on Overcoming the Fear of Speaking to Groups at:http://www.school-for-champions.com/speaking/fear.htm

Having problems making decisions

Question

I am having a huge problem in deciding that a thing is good or bad? I am not able to decide whether i should do it or not.

I don't know its my lack of confidence or what but the fact is I know that I have lost faith in me and also the self-esteem.

Also ,I am not a determined person.I know that I have to do this thing in my life but still I am not doing it and i really really don't know why I am like this...Please help me out...Please...

Arun - India

17982

Answer

Acknowledge your achievements, even small ones. This reinforces your confidence and esteem. Every time you complete a task, step back and admire your work and tell yourself, "Good job." This will help you remain confident.

When you need to make a decision, you can look at your ability to do the task. But also, you need to look at the consequences of failure. I have always felt that if there is a question about a decision, I have found that in most cases the best route is to take the safe way out.

For example, if you had to make a decision on taking a job, but you weren't sure if it was right for you, the best route to take would be to pass on the opportunity. Of course, you must decide logically, not out of fear for taking a risk.

What if the people around you dont give you support?

Question

What if the people around you eg work or family dont give you support?

- UK

17983

Answer

The most important person to give you support is yourself. When you do something well, give yourself praise. Say to yourself, "Good job!" to acknowledge it.

This is difficult to do for some people who don't have much esteem, as well as those who are perfectionists.

If you are proud of what you have done, others may see that in the way you carry yourself. If you are not proud of your work, others will assume it is not good and will not acknowledge it, even if it really is good.

Realize that some families simply don't believe in praising or giving support. Also, at work, if the boss would acknowledge a good job, that would be a bonus, since many just don't do it.

Thus, you can't depend on others to build you up. You have to acknowledge your own achievements. But if someone does praise you or gives you support, simply say, "Thank you. I appreciate that." It will make them feel good too.

Worried about what people say about her

Topic: Confidence

Question

April 3, 2009

hey my name is Nancy. i live in Santa Ana and i barely noticed that i lack self confidence. im always getting worried about what people would say about me. Guys at school make fun of me and i cant handle that. i feel like i am that, that im too skinny and ugly. When my cousins at another school tell off one of my ex friends HER cousin comes up to me and starts telling things and threatening me to jump me. And i get way too scared to even tell her something that if i said something she would kick my butt at that moment. i need to stand up to myself but i cant i seriously need help! Im sick of people stepping on me can you help me out?

love,

nancy - USA

17549

Answer

If you feel you are too skinny and ugly, then it will show in the way you carry yourself and act. Remember than most of the top glamor models are very thin. And also note how they carry themselves with confidence. This is what you need to do.

Why should you worry about what other people say about you? The only reason they might say things about you would be if you acted rude to them. Otherwise, people don't usually pay attention to others.

The guys at school make fun of you, because they can get a reaction from you. If you ignore them and simply walk away, it won't be fun for them. Or you could respond by saying something like, "Are you trying to be a comedian?"

But you really need to build up your esteem and confidence in yourself. Make a list of all the good things about you. Make another list of all the things you are able to do and what you are good in. build those lists, and you will see you have a lot going for you.

When you complete a task or do something, give yourself some praise. Say, "Good job, Nancy!" This reinforces your esteem and confidence.

Also avoid people who are critical, insulting or downers. Who needs them? Try to be around upbeat people, so that you can be like them.

You have what it takes, but it will take a little work to get to the point where you want to be.

Best wishes on becoming a champion to yourself and those who know you.

Is it correct to ask, "Do you firewalk?"

Question

Please, I'm a Brazilian, and I'd like to know if it is correct to ask using this construction: "do you firewalk?"

thank you

sandra - Brazil

17180

Answer

The "firewalk" is an expression that refers to the experience of walking on hot coals or embers.

If someone is not familiar with the activity, they might be confused if you asked, "Do you firewalk?" It might be better to ask, "Have you ever experienced a firewalk?" And then elaborate on what it is.