Friday, 1 March 2013

What I Know Now - Letter to my TWA

Source: Zazzle.com

Dear TWA,

It’s 2007 and I’m fresh off doing the Big Chop. It feels a little awkward because you’re used to being straight and long-ish (albeit thin). And now, you fear you make me look like a young school boy. You fear you have taken away a big part of my femininity because a woman’s crown is her hair, isn't it? You fear that men won’t be attracted to me anymore, and that I should run and hide you under numerous weaves, so that you don’t have to face the world in embarrassment. Well, I’m here to tell you that you couldn't be more wrong.

You are beautiful and this is only the beginning for you and I. At this point, you and I need to work together to ensure that you grow in a healthy manner. First things first, we need to do a bit of research…

Hmm, hair types – well, TWA, it looks like you’re a mixture of 4c and 4b, with a sprinkling of 4a, here and there. Heh? What does this mean? It just means you’re a fun mix of tight and loose curls. You are versatile!

DC, Co-wash, Moisturize, ACV, Henna, SSK, BC, EVOO? Confusion much? What are these acronyms? Do we have to learn a new language? Don’t freak out. There is SO MUCH information out there. So let’s just simplify it for now. The most important thing you want is MOISTURE. And no, moisture doesn't mean hair creams or oils. It means WATER! Water will become your best friend. You have a fear of being hard and unmanageable… water will do the trick. You have to seal in the water though – that’s where an oil and/or cream come in. You can use plain old Extra Virgin Olive Oil – yes, the one my mum cooks with. Or shea butter. Or coconut oil. Or castor oil. Uh oh, confusing you again, am I?

Product overload. In our research, we’ll find that the old products we used, are not safe for you. So we’ll have to find a completely new range of products. Carol’s Daughter, Kinky Curly, ORS, Miss Jessies, African Naturalistas, etc. There are so many out there. Honestly, it’s quite like me shopping for new clothes. But just as not all trends will work for me, not all products will work for you. You are unique and we’ll have to take care and stick to the products that help you maintain healthy growth. Just be patient.

Styling. Oh my gawsh, I know this is your biggest worry. But never fear, o TWA. You will come to a point where you’re medium length, and will wish you could go back to being short. Why? Wash-n-go’s! Do you know how awesome it is, that you can simply bask in the shower, get fluffed up a little bit with oil, and just go??? Where it used to take us 20 minutes to get dressed, it now takes us 10! Not only that, but we can experiment on weekends with twists, bantu knots, flat twists, and more. And yes, we’ll have a new-found love for wigs! Sweet TWA, the possibilities are endless. When in doubt, go to Youtube.

It may feel like you’re all alone, but there are so many other naturalistas out there. It may take us time to find them, but thank God for the invention of the internet. Because of you, I’ll join natural hair communities, subscribe to noted Youtube pages, and meet a plethora of ladies who we have so much in common with. Don’t worry, you’re not alone.

Remember how you were afraid to shine, worried that people would not appreciate you? You’ll find out that a lot of people admire you, admire your boldness, admire your uniqueness and will want to copy you. TWA, you’d better work it and bask in all that attention. And guess what, it’ll only get better as you grow up.

And finally, you will get frustrated. You will have setbacks. You will hear discouraging comments. You will want to go back to the “easier” relaxed life. But, I can only tell you that, what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. Sure, you’ll want to give up. Just hang in there a little longer. Sure, you’ll be envious of the other naturals with hair like Diana Ross’ wig. Hey, all hair is not created equal. Just stick to a healthy regimen and take your time. Enjoy every bit of the journey. It will get easier, trust me.

So my dear TWA, don’t worry about anything. You’ll be just fine. And one day, in 2013, your much longer self will wish for the days when you were just a baby. I love you now and always.