Sunday, September 13, 2009

I need some help with my pants.

Recently, I took part in some rather dashing and valiant heroics in the Argent Coliseum, and as a reward for my bravery, my guild awarded me Kel'Thuzad's Leggings of Triumph.

At first, I was very pleased about getting the loot, but after that initial surge of excitement wore off, I realized that I just can't wear these. The problem, you see, is the smell.

Now, I know Kel'Thuzad was a pretty great warlock, and he wore some pretty great warlocking pants. The stats on these are pretty awesome, and normally I'd feel very fortunate for a chance to wrap my goodies up in 140 spellpower. But these things are, to put it mildly, rank.

I don't know if Kel'Thuzad was too busy exploring the arcane depths of necromancy to pay attention to his personal hygiene or what. I know he was dead for a while. Maybe he was buried in these.

Sometimes, I think they reek of vinegary man-sweat. Sometimes I think they smell like rotting meat. What I know is that these things are just foul.

I do know that the folks at the laundry won't take them. I took them back to the vendor five minutes after I got them, and the crooked little jerk insisted my two hour refund period was already expired.

I don't know what kind of crap Tirion is trying to pull here, handing out used and soiled pants as a reward for killing demon lords and high-ranking lieutenants of the Lich King, but I've had about enough of this. Tell Tirion I am not pleased to be getting epic rewards that come complete with Kel'Thuzad's Skidmarks of Triumph, along with several other disturbing looking stains of indeterminate origin.