Angry Poems (and others).

ANGRY POEMS (and others)jay dancing bear

IntroductionSometimes when I think about all the suffering, greed, selfishness, stupidity, and ignorance that I perceive in people, especially in America, I get really upset.

So much suffering seems unnecessary, easily avoidable. People seem to lack vision, to not see the big picture, to not see that their actions and lifestyle have effects on people, animals and the environment all over the world.

I see a society in the midst of committing mass murder-suicide, especially ecologically. I see people who would never think of being mean to a cat or dog, ordinary, otherwise nice people, with blood dripping from their hands, responsible, unthinkingly and indirectly, for the most horrible cruelty perpetrated on the animals they eat and the animals drug research is done on. The issue to me is not so much that animals die, but how they live.

Political correctness has become a thing to ridicule, the butt of jokes, but it is accurate when it points out our responsibility, and our power to make the world a better place, just by making better choices about what we buy and eat.

It’s very easy to get angry. Often I have started accusing, blaming, condemning, and attacking, both mentally and verbally. I’ve sometimes even gone so far as to say that this is an asylum for criminally insane sociopaths. Pretty harsh stuff, huh? It doesn’t do anything except make me miserable and destroy my health and peace.

I know that people are not transformed by condemnation and blame, but by love. I try to lift my energy to my third eye, to see with the eye of spirit. The spiritual texts say that the world is perfect. I try to reconcile this higher perspective with the suffering I percieve, to try and truly feel in my heart “forgive them lord, for they know not what they do”, and to see the ultimate perfection of the world. It’s hard.

In that spirit, I hope that you, the reader, can see past the attack, to the love.

NICEI live in a nice neighborhoodthe people here are nicethe houses are niceThe cars, trucks and SUVs are nice

Each child has their own basketball hoopThey play with their fathers and mothersnot with each other

The garbage cans are filledThe water flows out of the taps and into the sewerswhile the rivers run dryThere are no sidewalks, but who walks anyway?

Not too far away there are nice storesfilled with nice things and nice peoplestanding in long lines with big shopping cartsIt’s all very nice

The schools are very niceThe students mostly white, middle classwith the occasional dark skin

There is a police curfew on the children at nightthey must not be on the streets after tenand, after all,
there’s nothing for them to do anywayexcept get into trouble talking and smokingIt’s all very nice

People are very polite, while around the worldbillions of other people are kept down, animals are tortured,and the environment is rapedso that everything can all be

Every one of us is so vulnerableNaked, a thin layer of clothing and wallsanything can happen at any moment

The old saying“People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones”

for our own protectionwe need to be aware of the consequences of our actionsactions which fall into the world like stones into a pondthe ripples eddying out in greater and greater circlesWhat goes around comes around

We all live in glass housesWithout even realizing itWe have thrown millions of stones at people we’ve never even metwill never meet
Those stones were boomerangsthe glass crumbles into a fine dustand suffocates us

IF WE ONLY KNEW

If we only knew the full consequences of our actionsIf we only knew how the animals we eat had livedhow they died,andhow the rest of our food is produced

If we only knew what happens to the rivers we get our water from, and the plants and animals that need the riverand what is put in that water

If we only knewall the poisons in our daily environmentwhat happens to our garbagehow people around the world starveso that we may get fat

If we only knew
all the suffering caused toPeopleAnimalsplantsplacesourselvesour childrenour friendsour neighbors

by our disrespectful lifestyleand thoughts

We know, but
we don’t want to know,
so we pretend we don’t knowbecause knowing is very inconvenientbecause then we have to change

How will we live?
What will we eat?
Where will we work?
How will we get around?

more importantlyHow will we get a sense of self worth and superiority?If we’re not busy, important, affluent people?

Fuck you, and the horse you rode in on, if you don’t like itbut anyway there’s nobody here but me

If it didn’t make me sick I’d get drunkinstead I have to content myself with caffeinewhat difference does it make, because any escape from life is temporaryThe title of my new novel, which I’ll never writeSentenced To Life: Prison Planet EarthI must have done something really fucked up to deserve this

That attitude ruins my lifebut it won’t go awayand since I really do believe in reincarnationI just have to live with it

OPEN HOUSE

Welcome to California, where the American Dream is deadWork hard, play by the rulesend up with nothing

unless you are really good with computersor some other high paying professionin which case you get a heart attack along with the capital gains

One bedroom, one bath house,
five hundred thousand dollarshow much do you need to make to buy that?

of course you can always pay rent, high rent, foreverand end up with nothing

Woody Guthrie said, “if you ain’t got the do re mi, better stay right where you are”, except that, sooner or later,it’s probably going to get to you, too, right where you are

Maybe it’s national karma for what we did to the Native AmericansMaybe it’s just bloodless capitalismor maybe it’s just the way it isbut whatever it is

it’s so dark ,you can’t see any signstraffic is moving 100 miles and houryour gas tank is on Eyou’re exhausted

and god may not even be home

MIRACLES

Which is a greater miracle?Walking on water, or a drunkard sobering up?Spontaneous remission of cancer, or a closed heart opening?Living for a thousand years, or loving those that hurt you?Turning lead into gold, or ordinary people becoming bodhisattvas?The world as it could be, or this world as it is, as it was, as it shall be,world without endAmen

BEING AND BECOMING

I hope to be a human being

Most of my consciousness is a human doing

A lot of that time is human becoming

Sometimes I’m a human having

There may be other things to be, but I’m not aware of them

I’ve had moments when I felt a part of all-that-is

but I couldn’t hold it, couldn’t keep it, couldn’t attain it

although I sure have tried

other times I’ve felt utterly bereft, empty, suffering. That is hell.

Most of the time I function and feel not great, not awful.

That’s all

1587 SANCHEZ

A 46 year old

walking past the house I lived in when I was 23

There is nothing to weep for, my life is much better now

SHOPPING

Going into stores, looking at the stuff

There is nothing I need, and I don’t even want much anymore

What could I buy that would change my life in a deep way?

What great bargain could I find?

I still look, it’s a habit, comforting in it’s familiarity

My material ambitions are falling away

replaced by the ambition to be peace

rather than to do the things which would bring me peace

to be secure

rather than to work towards security

to be love, loving, lovable and loved

OLD MAN

An old man no one sees does Tai Chi in his garden

outside, a wind of harmony blows

WHAT’S IN A LIFE?

People, places, things

thoughts, emotions, actions, reactions

Animals, insects, plants

Beginnings, endings, completions, and incompletions

Pleasure and pain

illusions of loss and gain

and so much more, and all for

what?

A good night’s sleep?

Breakfast in the morning?

Work in the day, sex in the evening, golf on Saturday, church on Sunday, death at 80, or 90, or 40?

?

IT NEVER ENDS

In our lives

there will always be more dishes to wash

there will always be more bills to pay

there will always be…..

there will always be…..

there will always be…..

IMAGINATION

Living in a world of bright lights and television ,it’s hard to imagine

the extraordinary

but

light a candle, stay up late, look at the moon and the stars and

many things seem possible

WRESTLING WITH THE WORLD

At some point in every life the day comes when we try to make sense

of this world we have been born into, especially our fellow humans

The tool we use is important

Using the mind to look at the world

is like trying to see the sky through a microscope

by this road many highly intelligent people have gone to despair

because their self interest and emotions clouded their minds

yet for some jnanis this is the way

Using the heart to embrace the world

is like picking up the edge of the sharpest razor

with your tongue

a death of a thousand cuts

raw and bleeding, you cry out, yet, somehow

you must use your heart

but it’s not enough

Using the spirit

an ephemeral thing

which for most of us is a concept, not an experience

using the spirit to unite with the world

to interpenetrate it, to become it, to feel it, to perceive it on the deepest levels, which deepen as we deepen

and then to find that the world is a mirror

it requires infinity to grok infinity,

and in the end,

in some way this poet can only suspect at this point

the world is infinite

and we are too

HOW LONG IS A MINUTE

How long is a minute?

60 seconds, stupid, obviously

but how long does a minute feel?

A minute waiting

a minute watching TV

a minute watching your child suffer

a minute at work, at 4:59

a minute making love

a minute having sex

a minute lying on a sunny beach, drunk

You get the point

How long is a year?

How long is a life?

Can a nineteen year old have lived longer than an eighty one year old?

subjectively speaking

or is that absurd?

To quote a cigarette ad

“it’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long”

What and who are you being in your life?

SCRAPS OF PAPER

Scraps of paper

are better for writing poems than clean

neat notebooks because

life is not clean and neat

ALONE

Alone with my mind, which will not shut up

which needs distraction

This is boredom

this is torture

this is truth

YES TOO

I have been looking for something for a long time

Many years ago I found what I was looking for

but I did not recognize it

so I kept on looking

Now I find, that all this time

it has been here, by my side, and all I have to do

is to say

yes

HOW MANY

How many lives have I lived

how many problems have I had

how many times have I gotten drunk

and

here I am

DRINKING TEA

I sit and drink tea in a new home

where I will be for one week

one in a series of many

the cats play, and I have my books

and a meditation cushion

the tea is good

EMPTY YOURSELF

That empty place you’re trying to fill

ain’t nothing ever gonna fill it

not food, not sex, not chocolate, not alcohol, not drugs

not all the daily narcotics of TV, newspapers, politics, empty words and conversations

not the high power distractions of romance, ambition, dedication, sacrifice, success, anger

and all the other feelings and emotions

not writing poems like this

ain’t nothing ever gonna fill that empty place in you, except

this breath

this movement

this moment

because the only thing which can ever truly fill emptiness

is emptiness

give it all up

get it all back

and give it up again, and again, moment by moment

again and again, moment by moment

you will be full-filled

MOMENTS

I picked up my watch and caught it going backwardsit thought it had me fooledbut I caught it

I thought these days felt very longmaybe it’s two hours forward and one hour backwardso even though only one hour goes ahead on the clockit’s really three hours

that’s it, so really
I’m already well over a hundredand I like it that way

Speaking spirituallyEveryone in the world has exactly what they needthere is perfect justiceSo much suffering the mind cracks open like an eggshelland the baby emergesThere is nowhere to go, nothing to do, no one to becomeAs the gunas ceaselessly engage in activity

Why haven’t I let myself taste all the joy of the world?
Why have I chosen to gorge my mind on pain and suffering, instead of dancing to the flute of divine love?

Why haven’t you?————————————————–

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