Thursday, September 18, 2014

Sometimes I experience the sensation of expansiveness. It happens most often just as I am waking up or drifting off. The best thing about this sensation is its optimism. This sensation tells me everything is as it should be. It's all good.

I can describe it is as a pot boiling over. I'm the pot and my spirit is the liquid inside the pot that expands until it can't be contained and starts to run over the edge. When your kitchen pots are boiling over it's a sign that you're doing something wrong. When your spirit wants to expand beyond the container of your body, it's a sign you are doing everything right. Just let it go.

I'm not sure if the sense of expansiveness is just my spirit letting loose with its bad self, or whether it is my portion of spirit joining with the mother spirit. Whenever it happens I get a glimpse of the person I can be, that I truly am, without the shackles of my ego, fears, values and social mores. The real me is playful, fearless, loving and curious. The real me really loves you. Even if you are being a bit of an asshole, I love you. The real me can see the real you inside of there. The real me knows the real you is being contained in this moment by all of your ego, fears, values and social mores. The real me wants to hug you or wink at you or tease you or give you whatever you need right now to let you know that everything is as it should be. You are all good. The real me trusts that when the situation is reversed, you will also love me. Imagine if the real me and the real you busted out at the same time? How great would that be?

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

My Chicken is being bullied by someone in your organization and something needs to be done about it. Bullying is not to be tolerated. Ask Michelle Obama. Or any of the 87 Real Housewives.

I am disappointed in you, Blogger. Has this behavior been happening under your nose and you've chosen to ignore it? Or am I giving you too much credit? Perhaps you are simply so negligent in your duties that you failed to notice? Either scenario is deplorable. If it were up to me, I would have removed Chicken from this hostile environment after the very first episode, but she's a fighter, my Chicken is, and she refused to give up her turf.

"It's just photos, Mom", she said. "I can always replace them." Well, it wasn't "just" photos, Blogger, it was every photo she's ever posted in the last six years. Gone overnight. If only she'd started on Word Press, like we encouraged her to do. But no, she found your site more user friendly. Ha. That's a laugh, isn't it? I watched her struggle to locate and replace each photo.

And then you took them again. Then post delays started happening. Links suddenly broke and people were blocked. Good people.

And still, my Chicken put a smile on her face and kept going. "Maybe I messed something up, Ma, it's no big deal.", she said.

But now it's gone too far, Blogger. I can no longer maintain my silence. At 7:52 PM this evening, my poor Chicken logged onto her page and discovered the theft of her entire blog roll. Even the gadget that supported her blog roll has disappeared. You've taken away her friends. Who does such a thing?

You, Blogger, will address this issue immediately. Future acts of bullying will be met with legal action. And I'm writing a letter to Andy Cohen. You heard me. Prepare for the anti-bullying fury of 87 botoxed housewives. I've heard those Australian ones are particularly agressive. But that's what you get. Nobody messes with my Chicken.