Jeff finds his fandom ... in the rival Cardinals after Albert Pujols hits a home run and celebrates by giving our NBA expert a special handshake.

Luis gets drunk, fires off a slew of offensive tweets directed at Cardinal Nation following text messages of unrequited love to pretty girls.

Oh, you were looking for something out of the ordinary. My bad.

As an aside, it's good to be back home in Chicago. I miss this place sometimes. The food. The atmosphere. The gas prices at $3.25 per gallon at the Shell on Irving Park & Pulaski. OK, so I don't miss that part, but if you know me then you will get the gist of what I'm saying.