Broken Social Contract

02/26/2018

On the afternoon of Feb. 14th, 2018, when most men are thinking of what card, candy or set of flowers they'll bring to the object of their affection, one man in particular decided this was a good day to bring an AR-15 assault rifle to his school and kill as many children and adults as possible. And due to countless mistakes and cowardice on the part of law enforcement, he succeeded in ending the lives of 17 souls.

And this is not a crime that rests on the shoulders of only one deranged individual. No. Lawmakers failing to challenge the National Rifle Association's (NRA) goal of making killing machines as accessible as bubble gum and law Enforcement's lack of follow through on signs and statements declaring this monster a clear and present danger to his community made this massacre all but assured.

To say nothing about the deputies who cowered outside during the melee, failing to do their job to protect the defenseless students, even thought they themselves were armed and most likely would have succeeded in taking out the killer, thereby saving many lives.

But this problem runs deeper than any one cowardly act or missed signal. As a society, we have a schizophrenic attitude when determining our priorities about guns and children's lives. Those on the Conservative side of the political spectrum have ordained that the rights of unborn children trumps that of women who may attempt to control their future by ending unplanned pregnancies. But those very children can be murdered in their own school and according to that same twisted Conservative logic, that should in no way impede the rights of gun owners to possess the very weapons used in those crimes. Even if it means that more children will surely die.

Who are those aiding and abetting these crimes? Countless politicians who cling frantically to their 2nd Amendment argument, while crying crocodile tears on television each time an institution of learning is turned into a war zone. And gun lobbyists who will stop at nothing to support and represent gun manufacturers, retailers and hunters Will they lose their jobs? Will they go to jail or be publicly shamed on television, in newspapers and across social media? No.

Guns at School vs Sex at Work. Which is a more pressing issue?

At the same time, politicians on both sides of the isle, CEO's and celebrities are being toppled daily. Publicly shamed, and excoriated across all media platforms for failing to curb natural biological urges in the workplace and elsewhere. Indeed, there are extremes that rise to the level of criminal activity, such as those committed by the likes of Harvey Weinstein. But many of these so-called abuses of power or acts of harassment were once accepted as a normal consequence of bringing men and women together under the stressful and socially complex umbrella of the workplace.

If you doubt or have no knowledge of what I'm saying, you can see the sordid and tempestuous encounters that have always sprung from the collective pressures of work accurately depicted in the artfully crafted series called "Mad Men".

But only recently have many more of these awkward and uninvited advances risen to the level of criminality in the eyes of society. Do these non-life-threatening acts of testosterone driven passion somehow carry a greater potential to shift social consciousness and change laws than the random and senseless killing of children? How is that possible?

Were a science fiction writer to conjure up a story where in a virus altered the collective consciousness of an entire nation and caused them to view unwanted sexual advances as a greater offense than the murder of children, the writer and his or her creation would be panned as garbage or maybe even labeled even nihilistic smut. And yet, this scenario very much resembles the topsy-turvy world we now live in. Sometimes, reality is indeed stranger than fiction.

But this is no joking matter. We had better get our priorities straight in this country. If our children are not safe, then the rights we claim to defend with our guns: To live in a free and open society, will be eroded. We will find ourselves living in a macabre world of our own making. A world in which narrow minded zealots are unwilling to prevent anyone from owning a gun, is a world where criminals and the insane will control our streets and institutions. It has been shown by the recent shooting at the Stoneman Douglas High School in Florida, that having armed officers on school grounds is no guarantee that a mentally disturbed individual with a gun will still have his way. More guns are not the answer!

One day, we may witness a #MeToo movement of men and women who have lost children to gun wielding criminals as successful as that which is now changing attitudes on sexual advances in the workplace. I hope it doesn't come to that. But if the killing of our own children is not enough to get our attention and motivate us to work together to find solutions, I'm not sure what will.

Startling Statistics

According to ABC News and many other news outlets, as of this writing, there have been 18 school shootings in 2018. Yes, within the 2 month period since the New Year, there have been 18 verified school shootings. Where is the list of heads that have rolled in the halls of government and law enforcement for allowing this trend to continue unabated?

Meanwhile, more than 100 men and one woman have lost their jobs and in many cases had to surrender their entire life's work and careers due to accusations over sexual misconduct, harassment and or even flirting Here is a list.

It is not my intent to downplay the impact on victims of true abuse and harassment in the workplace. There needed to be a correction to check those in power, (more often than not, men), who have increasingly lorded their influence and coercion over those at their mercy, for the purpose of sexual favors. Making the provision of those favors a condition for continued employment. Individually, there wasn't much a victim could do to stop these abuses. Their complaints were ignored and/or they were victimized again through retribution, for attempting to expose the perpetrator's misdeeds.

A tipping point occurred for some reason after the exposure of Harvey Weinstein as a dangerous, serial abuser, who employed a team of "handlers" to ensure his abuses never saw the light of day and to provide a stream of new exploits to feed his nefarious obsession.

When will there be a similar tipping point to finally do whatever is necessary to bring media, industry and government together to end this barbaric killing of our children? How can we celebrate our advances in science, medicine and technology and thereby consider ourselves an evolved society, if we cannot even protect our children from being killed in their classrooms?

Here are some proposals to consider:

Make it illegal to sell guns to anyone under age of 25.

Not just 21. Research has shown that the human brain is still very much a work in progress well into the 3rd decade of life. Especially for boys and men. The prefrontal cortex, which is involved in risk assessment and decision making is still building interconnections and improving its function. To place or allow to be placed into the hands of a person with an under-developed sense of right and wrong a gun, is to court disaster.

Punish parents or guardians who whether by intent or ignorance make guns accessible to children that go on to commit crimes where those guns are involved.

Prior to the shooting, Nikolas Cruz, the perpetrator in the recent Florida shooting that left 17 souls dead, was taken in by Roxanne Deschamps, following the death of his mother from pneumonia. After violent outbursts that required law enforcement intervention, Cruz moved out of the Deschamps home and was taken in by Kim and James Snead. They were aware that he owned guns and that he was adamant about keeping them. They locked those guns up in a safe, presuming they were the only ones with the key to access them. It turned out that Cruz had a spare key and accessed those guns, resulting in the deaths at the Stoneman-Douglas High School on Feb. 14, 2018.

In spite of many worrying outbursts, Instagram posts and run-ins with law enforcement that should have labeled this disturbed young man as a severe threat to his community, not only was nothing done, but the foster parents, the Snead's, claim they had no idea he had this violent streak. Both of these foster parents have jobs requiring a keen intellect and ability to observe and make critical decisions. The husband is an Intelligence Analyst and the wife is a neonatal nurse. How could they be so clueless about this monster living right under their roof? And should they be held partially responsible for these senseless murders?

Conclusion

This is indeed a complex problem and no one has all the answers. But we had better start asking some hard questions and be willing to take drastic measures to ensure this and future generations of children do not arrive to adulthood with untreated PTSD from having grown up in a society that was unwilling to provide them a safe environment in which to learn. If you think anger and hatred is fueling much of the violence in our society today, just wait!

11/06/2017

BY ABUSING POWER WOMEN PLAY THEIR OWN NEFARIOUS ROLE IN CREATING AND PERPETUATING A SEXUALLY CHARGED WORKPLACE.

Yes, I know, that seems like the pot calling the kettle black. I know that many, if not most of you reading this feel that by virtue of the gender roles involved, that sexual abuse of a male, by a female, is by definition, “impossible”, unless of course it is perpetrated on a child. But, I am talking about adults.

Let’s examine those roles for a minute. Whether you’re a man or woman. you may feel that you were put on this earth for some lofty purpose. Perhaps to help others, to move humanity forward through innovation, or to solve environmental problems, write compelling media, or whatever. And while that may be important on the human scale, in the larger scheme of Nature’s long-term strategy, you have one purpose and one purpose only: To procreate. To perpetuate the species. And how is that accomplished? Get ready. There’s going to be a disturbing word here…..SEX!!

If you doubt my assessment of our true purpose in our planet’s complicated drama, consider how Nature imbues us with all the resources necessary to propel and support the production of offspring, during our child-bearing years through the power of our hormones. In women, this makes for soft hair, smooth, shiny skin and, breasts that are full and round. Even the menstrual cycle, which is an annoyance for many women, is a monthly reminder that contained within them is the ebb and flow of creation itself. In men, testosterone levels rise and peak years and sex is a constant preoccupation. Spontaneous erections occur day and night, as every thought and behavior seems to emanate from a desire for or expectation of an intimate rendezvous.

In adolescence, the dance of love and sex are on full display, as young bodies and minds experiment with their respective powers of attraction and persuasion. Young men may build their bodies to impress women with their strength and prowess. Women may dress to reveal their feminine attributes, seeking to gain attention through sensual stimulation: Appearance, scent, tone of voice, etc. Most of us accept this dance as a rite of passage into adulthood. A temporary insanity that hopefully leads to lasting satisfaction through marriage and family.

But in reality, this dance never stops, it just becomes more complicated. And when less than subtle and unwelcome advances or sexual references are made by men, toward women it leads to discomfort in a workplace that is increasingly a melting pot of genders, cultures and sexual orientations. And after a tipping point like the Weinstein debacle, we now see a firestorm of allegations against men in powerful positions, exerting control over women for the procurement of sex. But this is nothing new, and it would be naive to assume that some combination of legislation, shaming or professional rebuke will bring it all to an end. It may make it less visible for a time, but as always, our baser instincts will eventually rise to the surface and take center stage again.

Where sex is concerned, women enjoy it as much or maybe even more than men do, but they are not driven by it. They can turn it on or off at will, depending on their situation.

Why? The truth is, we are all selfish creatures. We want what we want and we will use any and all resources at our disposal to get it. We know men want sex. Even elderly men, for whom sexual intercourse has become an impossible dream, cannot resist the temptation to turn their head in the presence of an attractive woman. This drive that men have to pursue, to be the tool through which life’s catalyst is disseminated is the most enduring and powerful urge in Nature. It is at the core of our being. The raw, untamable animal that still thrives within us. A fundamental and irrepressible instinct that cannot be sublimated by the thin vail of “civility”. And toppling successful men from their professional and political thrones will not alter that fact one iota. But this phenomenon of coercing or even abusing others to achieve their goals is not limited to men. Perhaps it is time to ask:

How have women been abusing their power over men for centuries?

This question is conspicuously missing from the discussion of power imbalances between the sexes. And because men are reproached by their peers and society at large if they reveal a fundamental weakness that is being exploited by others, you are not likely to hear much about this side of the gender equation. But that does not mean that its examination has no merit. Indeed it does.

Men, by nature are impulsive. Impulsivity is at what makes them good hunters and warriors. Stopping to think and plan when you’re in the path of a charging rhino is a recipe for disaster. Looking into you’re opponent’s eyes to take inventory of his soul during hand to hand combat can get you killed. So natural selection has programmed men to act first and ask questions later. Their actions are overt and transparent. They ask for what they want, whether verbally or through their actions, their agenda is clear. And where women are concerned, what they want the pleasure of physical contact. And for men in highly stressful and demanding jobs and or positions, this need for stress relief reaches a fever pitch. It begins to feel as if their very survival depends on it. And indeed, it may. History is rife with stories of men in powerful positions, facing impossible challenges, seeking relief and refuge in passionate affairs. Granted, these affairs were most often consensual. But nonetheless, it makes clear that sex is a way for men to diffuse and deal with the sometimes overwhelming challenges that life throws at them.

What do women want?

Women on the other hand have other ways to diffuse their stress. They are, for the most part, more social. Women love to gather in groups, gossip and laugh. Shopping is another satisfying outlet that takes their mind of problems at home or at work. And when we trace this affinity for community and acquisition back to its origins, we can see that it dovetails perfectly with their natural roles as mothers, homemakers and nurturers. Women have gathered together for millennia to care collectively for their infants and children. They may even share their breast milk with another’s the offspring, to maintain the bond between them and ensure the survival of their community or tribe.

Where sex is concerned, women enjoy it as much or maybe even more than men do, but they are not driven by it. They can turn it on or off at will, depending on their situation. What matters to women is security. And what contributes to security? Money, home, status, comfort, popularity, friendship and some level of control over their primary relationships. These are the baser instincts that drive women, as they have from the beginning of time. But women are more patient. They can wait, conspire, manipulate, and cajole to get what they want. And more often than not, the object of these calculations are powerful men. Like it or not, men have, on the whole, held positions of power in society. Their combative, impulsive nature and limitless stamina provide the sheer force to bore through or leap over obstacles. They may choose to not be encumbered by family responsibilities or the rearing of children and they don’t have to deal with a monthly cycle. They are free to focus all their energies on domination. And once they succeed, they become the target of aspiring women. A stepping stone into a life which women feel is unattainable by any other means.

And this is the stage upon which abuse of female power rears its ugly head. In some women, a passive / aggressive strategy begins to form that is so subtle, it is often undetected by men. And that strategy is centered upon appealing to men’s primary achilles heal, their intrinsic weakness. Sex. And this “baiting”, if we can call it that, can have unpredictable, even dangerous consequences for women, ranging from off color sexual comments to rape. Ironically, if and when this plan backfires, these same women will claim victimhood and assume no responsibility for the result of their actions. They will claim a right to dress or act as they wish, secretly aware that such behavior is very effective at triggering male attention and hence, preferential treatment, This duality of behaving badly and then crying fowl is at the core of the one-sided campaign now being waged against men. Sure, in a perfect world men would keep their impulses under control. But when stress and the presence of female coercion converge, women have an unfair advantage.

And how does this abuse of female power affect men?

I have listened to countless interviews of and complaints by women about how a sexually charged workplace has interfered with their ability to feel comfortable, valued or to advance. And yet, through the use of make up, lipstick, implants, push up bras, plunging necklines, high heels, expensive perfume, sexy outfits and the like, they create what is essentially a sexual sucker punch. Can you image how a man might dress with equal provocation? Imagine an executive coming to work in a leotard, rather than a suit. This garment would be so form fitting that the crack of his ass and the outline of his genitals would be visible. If indeed, a male employee showed up to work dressed like this, he’d be thrown out on his ear.

But women have the latitude to dress as they please. They can dial up the sexual heat through their many avenues of accentuation and it’s rarely challenged.

Add to this, the often subtle and not so subtle cues like suggestive glances, flicking of the hair, or bending over a desk while wearing a low cut blouse. This is tantamount to a tease and the effect of creating tremendous distraction and preoccupation for men. They are simply unable to be in the presence of such provocative visual signals without becoming aroused. And when that arousal causes them to react in inappropriate ways, we blame them for behaving exactly as nature intended.

Of course most women will not admit to engaging in such provocative behavior. For some, that may be true or they may not be aware of it. But I would bet, if most women, who have suffered unwelcome advances from men in the workplace took inventory of their motives and were honest with themselves, they would find some truth in what I’ve said.

Now this in no way excuses rape, or forced sexual encounters of any kind. That is violence and exploitation and is not acceptable under any circumstances.

But when a man puts his hand on a woman’s knee, when he touches the small of her back, when he looks perhaps a little too long at a her breasts, or makes sexual references during a dinner outingthis should not be a career ending transgression. The woman involved may want to examine if and how her dress or behavior may have contributed to these unwelcome overtures. If modifications are then made and the behavior continues, perhaps it’s time for a transfer to another job or department. But don’t just march into Human Resources and threaten to sue the company unless they fire this individual. Oh yes, in this politically correct and litigious society we now live, you may indeed succeed in getting him fired, and or in obtaining a sizable settlement from the company. But then don’t go blabbing to about the need for others to act with integrity or to take personal responsibility.

What is the solution?

Let’s just cool down, step back from the precipice and be realistic. Sex is the reason we are all here. It may not always be welcomed, it may not be pretty or pleasant to think about, but it is here to stay. And Nature has placed men in the position of being the pursuers. Can we all agree on that? Women play coy, act uninterested and fein annoyance, but in the end, sometimes a persistent man succeeds in getting the girl. In fact women often say that men give up too easily. In the course of their little act of avoidance, men get the impression they are being rejected and give up. Women are understandably confused by this. They feel ambivalent about what they are supposed to do. If they give in too quickly, they’ll be labeled as “easy”. If they respond too slowly, guys give up.

For men, this dance is equally confusing and frustrating. For many, work is where the majority of their social interaction takes place. It is where they are likely to meet the greatest concentration of women. And while it may be frowned upon to dabble in romance at the workplace, more people meet their future spouse at work then in all other social settings combined. So there must be a little give and take and mutual empathy for the respective burdens each gender carries in the sexual dance.

Now again, I am not referring to lewd, aggressive, demeaning or threatening behavior. This should never be tolerated under any circumstance.

But as is so often the case with human behavior, we tend to allow the pendulum to swing to the extreme when issues arise and the risk here is that innocent, maybe even awkward, but otherwise well-intentioned behavior will be misconstrued and mislabeled as sexual harassment.

For women, understand that when you “dress to kill”, you are not only getting attention from other women in the office, (which you may want), but also from men, (which you may not want). It is not an innocuous and innocent enterprise. You are increasing the chances you will receive reactions you may not have intended or desired. If and when this happens, it is not fair to blame only men for lacking self control. You must learn to take responsibility for the waves you set in motion. As Newton described, “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction”. This applies not only to physics but also to human interaction. And when you play with fire, you are much more likely to get burned.

08/19/2017

I am sorry to define one of Humanity's hallowed institutions in such stark terms, but when you honestly compare the two seemingly disparate environments, the likeness is undeniable.

Let's take the recent tragic events in Barcelona, where 14 people were killed and over a hundred injured in a "mowing" attack, which took place in broad daylight in that city's iconic Ramblas shopping area.

In case you missed this "all to familiar" story: A van, driven by an as yet unidentified assailant, drove down the iconic Ramblas shopping area in Barcelona at a high rate of speed, weaving from side to side in an effort to run over as many pedestrians as possible. In a separate, but probably coordinated attack, two police officers were also struck in a different area on the same day. They were both killed. The total now stands at 14, which may increase if some of the many critically injured expire in the hospital.

I was just there three weeks earlier. Vacationing in Spain, as so many do from across the globe, I found the city at once charming and chaotic. I have a natural fear of crowds and congested areas. And for someone like me, a place like Barcelona's city center is a cluster of unsettling sights and sounds. An odd man who looks at you a little too long, or a car that drives erratically, etc. Though those in my midst seemed blissfully ignorant of any perceived warp in the natural order of things, my defense mechanisms were on high alert. Perhaps that is what caused me to make the observation when I was there, that Las Ramblas would make a perfect target for a radicalized extremest to conduct a car attack.

Las Ramblas is like a broad sidewalk or median strip. On either side of that pedestrian area is a two lane road that provides access for commercial vehicles to make deliveries or commuters to avoid even busier streets elsewhere.

As you can see, on any given day, there are hundreds of persons densely packed, milling around, each lost in their own unique world of shopping, architectural wonder and people watching. Cars and trucks whiz by only feet away, without even a curb to separate them from the throng.

On the day I was there, I also was snapping pictures of the charming architectural wonders that line the entire district. But I couldn't shake the notion that we were like sitting ducks in that funnel of humanity. Right in the cross-hairs of a errant vehicle that might leave the road either intentionally or by virtue of having lost control. I kept looking behind me, scanning my surroundings in every direction, looking for anything out of place.

And though Spain is not unique in this regard, pick-pockets abound. Distracted shoppers, flush with cash represent a business opportunity for clans of criminals that steel from tourists with the finesse of a surgeon. Men with wallets in their back pocket or women with purses dangling by their shoulders present low-hanging fruit to these scammers, who have elevated this type of personal attack to an art form. Often, the victim has no idea they were robbed until they reach for their wallet or pocketbook and find it missing. We met half a dozen co, uples who were assaulted in this way, turning what was supposed to be their relaxing vacation into a mind-jarring nightmare of having been violated.

It was only after returning home, that I began to process the whole experience. Then upon hearing the tragic news that my fear was indeed prescient, I realized, we can only become victims of this ubiquitous threat if we continue to be complacent about the reality of our cities. They have become the new Savana, where we, like pack animals roam to feed, engage in mating rituals, recreate and relax and where we may become at any time, the victim of a predatory act.

It has often been stated, that there is safety in numbers. It is this philosophy that has allowed people to feel at ease in crowds. But this once wise strategy has been turned on its head, suddenly, it is crowds that are targeted.

Unlike grazing bison or elephants, facing outward to protect the young and weak from a carousing wolf pack or snarling lion, there is no defense against a 3 ton hunk of hot metal careening into a crowd at 60 miles an hour. This is not the case of one or even several hungry predators seeking vulnerable individuals to feed their young or satisfy their own hunger: that is almost honorable and even understandable by comparison with the senseless bloodshed sought and promulgated by the vermin that live in our midst.

In some ways, a prey animal on the Savana has more warning and opportunity to escape. A lion will always look like a lion. Four legged predators cannot don a disguise. The best they can do is skulk in the tall grass and hope that their outline or their scent is not detected by their intended victim. But human predators look for the most part like you and me. It could be your neighbor, a person delivering a package, a customer in a pizza joint. No stranger is completely beyond suspicion and therefore, unfortunately, everyone must be considered a potential threat.

I know, I know, you say, this is no way to live. But I say, This is how you will continue to live. The bubble you have presumed is your protection, has suddenly become your prison of ignorance.

What to do:

A.Avoid cities whenever possible. I know this sounds ridiculous, but over the last century, there has been a disapora of humanity streaming from rural areas across the globe, to densely populated cities, in search of opportunities, jobs, social activities, whatever. This has spurred tremendous economic growth, technological advancements and many things that are positive for our society. But it has also made us all more vulnerable then ever. Terrorists who seek to wage cowardly attacks en masse, find easy pickins in our crowded cities, where inhabitants and visitors alike, must become inured to loud noises, odd looking people or other potential signs of danger.

B.If you live in or must go to a city.... shopping mall, concert hall or other crowded venues, make a point to familiarize yourself with the exits, first and foremost. Ask yourself, "If I had to escape this place in a hurry, maybe in the dark, how would I do it"? If you're in a group, take a moment to agree on that plan of action and where you'll meet if the unthinkable happens.

C.Watch everything. Imagine yourself a gazelle on the Savana, because, increasingly, that is how you're seen by a growing nefarious element in our society. Know that danger can emerge from any and every direction and as you're supposed to when you're driving, scan near and far, looking for anything out of place. Do not a lulled into a state of complacency or allow your attention be diverted for more than a second. Make awareness of your environment a supreme priority anywhere and everywhere you travel.

Ask yourself: How is it that a 3 ton van could be barreling down a pedestrian breezeway, roaring and rattling, mowing down and obliterating everything in its path and still be undetected by so many soon to become its next victims? It seems incomprehensible, but that is exactly what happened.

Remember, there is no longer safety in numbers. There is now only safety in personal and perpetual vigilance.

01/23/2017

A new salvo in the war of words between Donald Trump, his staff and well…. everyone else.

You’ve no doubt heard yesterday’s comment by KellyAnne Conway to Chuck Todd on NBC’s “Meet The Press”, The comment was in response to Todd asking why Sean Spicer was sent to the White House briefing room to meet with the Media (what we used to call “Reporters”), and asked, presumably by the President to float a bold faced lie in response to reports that Trump's inauguration was poorly attended. “The crowd was the largest ever. Period”. is how Spicer characterized it. Which was of course revealed as false seconds afterward across the globe, with images streaming on Twitter, Facebook and everywhere else, comparing the sea of Humanity attending Obama’s inauguration with the anemic turnout for Trump’s big day.

Conway defended Spicer's comment by saying it represented"Alternative Facts". And consequently, she revealed that she, her boss and apparently the entire Trump administration are comfortable with projecting a sort of “parallel reality” , as long as the goal of obfuscation, subterfuge and distortion is achieved.

Is that what we have to look forward to for the next 4 years? If so, we had all better bone-up on the meaning of “The Absolute Truth” and learn to recognize when stupid, careless or malevolent individuals are trying to pass off some facsimile there of.

What is the Truth?

Liars, scam artists, people with borderline personality disorders and apparently some politicians will try to convince us that there are various versions of The Truth. So, let’s be clear: The Truth is absolute. There is only One Truth. There may be people’s opinions about what that Truth is, but the fact remains, there are lies, versions, deviations, fictionalized accounts, people’s beliefs and then, there is The Truth.

Now, the Truth may be revised, when new FACTS are presented, but again, there are FACTS and then there are, the now infamous inversions called, “Alternative Facts”.

Those with a Conservative and or Republican political persuasion will read my words and presume I am only pointing out this incident to further beat down and delegitimize their chosen leader. First of all, nothing I could say or do would further that cause more than Trump’s own words and those of his staff. But no. My intent here is to use this incident to point out that I, like many trusting people of conscience, have been victimized by unscrupulous individuals who operate from one Machiavellian mindset:

“Whatever it takes to achieve my goals is right and just. My needs and desires exceed those of all others and I will have my way, regardless of who suffers”.

It is just this mindset that has empowered murderers, corporate thieves, terrorists, dictators, rapists, gold diggers, wife beaters and other scum of the Earth to subject their innocent and unfortunate victims to their particular brand of evil.

I have struggled to understand this departure from civilized behavior and have concluded that those with integrity, compassion and empathy for others will never be able to fully wrap their mind around what makes this sort of creature tick. But I do believe that I have deduced one trait they all share, one unspoken credo that they all live by:

“If you’re stupid enough to fall for this shit, then you deserve to suffer”.

If you agree with me that there may be even a little veracity in that statement, then you have a responsibility to yourself and loved ones to be on the lookout for these imposters, obfuscators, liars and manipulators. They are all around you, not just in our political system, but lurking behind a telephone, making unsolicited calls; coming to your door, using this or that excuse to gain your confidence; on the used car lot; in the courtroom; on television; radio, as well as everywhere on the internet. You must be on the lookout for these predators, just as the Gazelle must constantly be wary of the lion or hyena.

So to conclude: When you hear anyone, especially someone who presumes to lead others, allow a phrase like “Alternative Facts” to fall nonchalantly from their lips, rest assured, there will be other half truths, outright lies and deceptions to come.

"When we turn our back on the enemy, that is when we are most likely to we feel the cold thrust of the knife".

06/15/2016

As we gather to shop for and celebrate our respective holiday events, it is important to remember that there are those who are bent on using fear and violence to further their cause of anger, prejudice and hate. They can strike anywhere in the world, without notice, potentially changing your life and that of those you love forever.

Recent incidents in Berlin, Nice and elsewhere highlight the fact tha efforts on the part of authorities to anticipate and thwart these massacres have had little success. Therefore, if you must be in crowded areas during the holidays or frankly at anytime, it is up to you to maintain awareness of your surroundings, the location of the nearest exits and any unusual activity in taking place in your proximity. Every few minutes, stop and scan what is going on around you. When and if you hear or see anything even remotely different or unusual, don't pass it off as inconsequential. Resolve to know what it is, where it's originating from and if it presents a danger. When in doubt, leave or move toward an exit route, until any uncertainty passes.

Logic would dictate that those with bad intentions would wish to inflict terror on the greatest number of people. It's a numbers game and achieving the highest number of casualties with the smallest device or least detectable plan is how efficiency is measured in the terrorism industry. Backpacks left unattended, large trucks plowing into crowds, knife wielding assailants and terrorists dressed as security personnel are several low tech schemes that come to mind.

Knowing that, to avoid becoming a victim, it would stand to reason that whenever possible, staying out of crowds or away from places where dozens or even hundreds of people gather, will greatly increase your chances of avoiding the terrorist threat that may eventually come to your city, town, or community, in some form or another.

Your obvious and understandable response to this list would be to say: "In order to stay away from these places, I will have to drastically change my behavior". And that analysis would be right on the money.

We've identified one of the problems, the fact that terror seeks to do as much damage as possible through attacks on places where people gather.

But the other problem is that security is expensive and also off-putting to potential customers. So many businesses and community services are reluctant to incorporate it. But to use this as an excuse to not have metal detectors and a police presence in every public venue, is to continue living in a haze of denial.

We are at war folks, a war for our very lives and there is no end in sight. I am sorry to have to be the one to tell you this, because, ostensibly, my job is to focus on the positive. That is the niche I've carved out for myself, to provide you new ideas and ways to create sustainable happiness.

And if you'll read my book or peruse some of my other posts, you'll discover that creating and sustaining happiness does require some difficult choices, discipline, the development of new habits. Also, a focus on staying alive and healthy, among other things.

The world has changed and we must change with it.

Here are some of the survival strategies I propose in response to the proliferation of guns, bombs and violence in our society.

Make your home a sanctuary - Stop thinking of your home as just a place to hang your hat, sleep, shower and shave. Your home statistically is the safest place for you to be. So if you live in a house, paint the interior, decorate the walls with art, bring in some flowers, landscape the yard, attract birds and butterflies and take up a hobby that you can do from home that promotes joyfulness and perhaps eventually provides an additional income.

If you rent or live in an apartment, it becomes a little more challenging, but there is still much you can do to make your living space more enjoyable. If you're wondering where to get the money for that, add up what you spend at Starbucks and for the fancy ride currently parked in the driveway. Maybe you can repurpose some of that money into your living space. Remember, it's about making different choices.

Invite friends to see your new digs and provide them a place to recreate that serves as an alternative to crowded and dangerous public venues.

Consider taking your kids out of school - There is no doubt that the school system in the United States is struggling to fulfill its basic mission: That of educating our youth. Now, they are under pressure to also make their campuses more safe and impenetrable. But few, if any resources are voluntarily dedicated to that until or after a deadly crisis has struck.

Young children and teens are now the most vulnerable individuals in our society. To evildoers, killing kids provides the additional benefits of causing deep and lasting pain to their parents and culling individuals from future generations. They represent the ultimate soft (easy) target. Because we wish to shield them from the truth about the dark side of humanity, to preserve their innocence as long as possible, they are the least prepared to anticipate or respond to a killer in their midst. They just freeze in place and then, the unthinkable happens.

Take your kids out of school and educate them at home. Again, this involves making some difficult choices. If you and your spouse both work, find a way to downsize in order to keep one parent at home. If you are not yet married, seriously consider having fewer children so that raising, feeding and educating them at home will be a more manageable task.

Have religious services at home, rather than going to church - Churches are a favorite target for terrorists, because attacking them damages the belief of the faithful. In many parts of the country and the world, the church represents the center of the community. It is where people find the solace and strength to deal with life's challenges and where they stay connected to their neighbors.

But this very fact makes striking a church like removing the spiritual scaffolding out from underneath an entire town or neighborhood. Additionally, churches are rarely protected by security and therefore, make an easy place to smuggle in weapons.

Travel by car whenever possible - If you're planning a vacation in the near future, consider finding a way to drive there, rather than flying or taking the train.

Train stations and airports have seen steady and consistent attacks, because so many people gather there. Furthermore, they are bogged down with luggage and kids in tow and less able to escape if violence ensues. Of course, planes and trains also provide an inviting target for terror, because so many are huddled in a small space. Blowing a piece of technology out of the sky makes a spectacular statement against the advance of modernity. A key obsession for those who would prefer to see the world return to the dark ages.

Alternatively, if you must take a train or plane, travel at odd hours. For a terrorist, striking a center of public transportation at midnight is anathema. For maximum impact, it is better to strike at commute times or on weekends when the facilities are crowded. Avoiding those times, ensures greater safety.

Conclusion - So often, when we are forced to make sweeping changes, the task seems daunting and scary. Then later, in the rear-view mirror, we recognize that as a result of those actions, our lives evolved in new, unanticipated and even exciting directions.

Throughout history, the course of humanity has been shaped by natural and man-made cataclysms. The world we now live in-for better or for worse- has directly resulted from those events. But drilling down to analyze the lives of the individuals impacted by those tumultuous times, we discover that those who survived and lived on to foster future generations were those who anticipated an end to "the world as they knew it" and made the difficult choices to create a new, albeit, unfamiliar paradigm. A paradigm that emphasized action over apathy, awareness over ignorance and survival over annihilation.

We are now living in such times. Those who refuse to change may find themselves relegated to a sound byte; statistic on the morning news. As my father once told me: "Forewarned is Forearmed". Knowledge is power, but only when you use it to inspire the appropriate response.

03/27/2016

With the recent and painful news of the killings in Orlando, Florida and cold blooded murder of the young singer, Christina Grimmie, everyone is on high alert. There is a collective raising of blood pressure and lowering of our mood and sense of hopefulness.

After one of these events it is typical and normal to be suspicious of others, waiting on pins and needles for the day, if or when you, or someone you love will become a victim of just such an attack.

It is also understandable and normal to feel helpless in the face of this global threat, especially when it strikes on home turf.

But there is something you can do that will make a big difference in your life and that of those you encounter.

Find ways to be kind, every day.

It may seem like a small and therefore, insignificant gesture, yet it is anything but. You may notice, people scanning the faces of those in their midst... scanning your face more intensely than in the past. What are they looking for?

Implied by that stare is an unconscious question. "Is today the day?" "Are you the one that will change my life forever, maybe even kill me?"

Drill down into your own inner being. Haven't you asked that very question in small and various ways every time news of yet more bloodshed is on the lips of innocent people?

That kind of fear knows only one antidote: Kindness.

People are anxious to feel better. To believe that there might be some meaning or benefit to come from all this tragedy.

You can provide that just by saying Thank You; opening a door for strangers; smiling for no reason; giving your space in line to someone older or with a greater burden than you own.

Showing your appreciation when someone does there job well, or maybe especially, when they don't.

Try to imagine the suffering of others and act accordingly. This is the definition of compassion and it was already in short supply before the senseless killing of innocent people began.

Now, more than ever, it is time to bring back this highest expression of humane treatment. Fight back against this war of fear, instability and hatred, with a quiet revolution.

Carry a field of peace around you. Project it to everyone in your midst, where ever you go.

Let them feel your humanity and perhaps they will be inspired pass it along to others.

There is no more powerful way to stand up to fear than with compassion.

01/06/2016

There is a slow moving national tragedy, occurring mostly in the shadows. It may indeed be affecting your friends, family, colleagues, even yourself, but this situation may lie just beyond your perception. A silent killer that stalks at night as well as in the light of day, yet is so insidious and pervasive we miss the poisoning result of it’s toxic campaign until it’s too late. Only a recent study was able to see the disturbing trend by looking at demographic shifts. And what it reveals is staggering.

Let’s dive in to look more closely.

When a Nobel Prize winner comes out with a study, it usually garners big headlines and this one is no exception. Angus Deaton, a Princeton University economist, along with his wife Anne Case discovered a pattern of U.S. middle aged whites dying in record numbers from preventable causes such as suicide, drug overdose and alcoholism. No other racial group or industrialized country is experiencing the same degree of mortality and this trend speaks volumes to the decline in the quality of life this group has come to expect. This trend was independent of the ‘Usual Suspects” such as cancer, diabetes and heart disease. These are self inflicted causes involving overuse of opioid pain killers, such as oxycontin, poisonings and chronic liver disease, resulting from alcoholism. And no clear drivers of this trend have yet emerged, but it would seem that in this case, white Americans are becoming like the proverbial ‘canary in the coal mine', perhaps symptomatically declaring what we all know but are loathe to admit: that our way of life is changing and it would seem there is nothing we can do about it.

That is the conundrum and parsing it out uncovers some interesting socio-economic realities. Black and Hispanic groups who are actually seeing improvements in their overall health and mortality rates have never believed that the ‘American Dream’ was conceived for them. When one has low expectations and conditions remain the same or decline, the psychological effects are not as severe as for one who feels let down or betrayed by “their own system”. And while white Americans with only a high school education or less are the most conspicuous group dying in record numbers, the trend can be seen up and down the white economic ladder, pointing to something deeper than merely being less well off.

Some possible answers

Drawing from my own anecdotal observations: African Americans and Hispanics tend to enjoy better family relations, maintaining strong connections between individuals across the generations. When times get tough, these groups instinctively band together to share living space, expenses and meals, with little or no conflict resulting from their increased proximity. These familial connections make it less likely that one member’s aberrant behavior will go unnoticed. Drug addiction, alcoholism or depression are much more difficult to hide from those who know you best and care about you most. And the guilt resulting from causing anxiety to your parents and grandparents serves as a strong incentive to get your life back on track.

White Americans on the other hand are most likely to be members of a broken family, with ex-spouses, parents and grandparents spread across the country. When the individual falls on hard times, there is no one around to lean on, there is no one to observe or curtail bad behavior. And when a white man or woman suffers unemployment or under-employment, with its associated cascade of mounting bills and declining health, the lack of options often leads to one spiraling down into depression, addiction and possibly even suicide.

Wake up and smell the coffee

The fact is, as we enter this new year, it’s necessary for each of us individually and collectively, to come into alignment with a few realities. The American Dream, if it ever existed is either dead or on life support. We no longer live in an insular paradigm, with the ability to prosper in spite global trends. We are now tied like never before to a single economy, with several moving parts, rather than an independent financial system. The permeability of our borders, whether physical or ideological has given rise to new threats showing up on and within our borders. Terrorism, global weather instability, the loss of manufacturing jobs, the financial crisis and fear of cyber attacks are all relatively new realities that no one can hide from. And the gravity of this new world order seems to have struck at the heart of the story white America has been telling itself for generations: that if you work hard and stay out of trouble, you will prosper and succeed. The narrative has always been that each successive generation achieves more than the one before: better health, better standard of living and more satisfaction. But it appears that this trend has peaked and is now reversing and no one feels it more than white America.

Having grown up in this democracy, I have heard the drumbeats against socialism and communism all through the cold war and beyond, precisely because our system was supposed to be better. The narrative has been that the individual has the opportunity to achieve his dreams and accumulate mass amounts of wealth, if he will only apply his imagination and persevere through the hardships. And as the chart above reveals, that has been true for a small percentage of the population, but for most of us, it's sounding increasingly apocryphal. This philosophy goes on to admonish that best way for government to help society is to get out of the way, allow business and innovation to drive progress.

The 100 year experiment

Certainly, the industrial revolution, which started around the beginning of the last century demonstrated that business rather than government was the platform most likely to improve the lot of the wealthiest nations. And if you were lucky enough live in one of these, it was easy to remain ignorant of the fact that the so-called 2nd and 3rd Worlds, still lived in relative anarchy and chaos. But now, increasingly the lines between countries, races and classes are becoming blurred. Rather than middle and upper class Americans living in a perpetual bubble, immune from the dangers of the wider world, it is increasingly evident that we all live on a shrinking planet, whose rotation is slowing. And governments are having to intervene with food stamps, constraints on financial abuses, monetary manipulation, health care cost controls and aid to the elderly and homeless to a degree that was previously derided as "socialistic", precisely because when the global economy tanks, it pulls down the standard of living for everyone.

There is no longer a privileged class and the cost of supporting this behemoth system is relegating our previous way of life to the history books. In essence, we all must share some of the responsibility and therefore the pain of compromise.

We are indeed living in a “New World Order”, but it’s not the bucolic serenity foretold in biblical fantasies, rather it is a world mostly of our own creation that we have come to fear and detest. And as with any system, whether natural or man made, only the strong will prevail when the chips are down. But in this case, strength will not be measured by the size of one’s muscles or arsenal, but rather his or her ability to think on their feet. Street smarts, if you will. Imagination, ingenuity, perseverance, discipline and self determination will still win the day, but also good relationships and strong families round out the most potent tools in anyone’s life.

I’m sorry ‘White America’, it’s time to get off your pedestal and learn what other ethnic groups learned long ago: the system is not set up for you or for anyone other than those in power. But responding to that by abusing drugs and alcohol will only ensure you have fewer tomorrows in which to find a solution to your problems, instead, leaving them in your wake for someone else to deal with.

Reduce your expectations, don’t expect to be rich, don’t expect corporations or government to care about you, don’t buy into the media driven notion that gadgets can make you happy or that politicians can fix the world.

Instead, bring your family together, learn to compromise with one another, gain from the strengths each of you brings to the table, pool your resources, organize your life, reduce your expenses, grow your own food if and whenever possible.

Our century long social experiment is failing society and it’s time to return to traditional values, the ones that sustained humanity for centuries.

Follow this simple plan and you will survive this crisis, to hopefully see better days ahead:

•Care for your health •Live simply•Love abundantly •Give generously •Work enthusiastically •And be happy for what you still have.

12/07/2015

I cannot authentically write about the struggle for happiness without acknowledging the evil that threatens to challenge it every day.

Yes, I am speaking the ongoing and increasing number of mass shootings that are dominating the news and haunting our thoughts.

It has been said that Americans appear to have a tolerance for these unspeakable horrors, because in spite of the tragic loss of life and the many families and communities that are affected, life goes on as usual. But what choice do we have? I am sure, like me, many of you are wracking your brain, trying first to understand the twisted logic of individuals and groups that support and carry out these murderous rampages and of course, again like me, no answers emerge.

No one with empathy, integrity and a belief in the sanctity of life, can begin to understand the level of disconnection necessary to mow down men, women and children in cold blood. These are barbaric, cowardly, disgusting, macabre acts of insanity and they must be stopped, but how? No, neither Americans nor the citizens of any other country have a tolerance for murder. But in the face of a conundrum that appears to have no end and no solution, our brains have a built in decoupling mechanism.

We cannot become paralyzed by fear, hatred or frustration to the extent that we’re unable to function, so we compartmentalize. We store away that which we’re unable to process, in some dark recess of our consciousness for later digestion. But, before we can revisit it and find something resembling closure, yet another mass shooting has transpired.

Probably like you, I have listened to many intelligent leaders from various disciplines, psychologists, politicians and military historians and no one can explain with any degree of satisfaction, what happens in the mind of a mass murderer. In some cases, where religious extremism is involved, the term “radicalization” is used, but what does that really mean? One day, you’re a mother, nursing your baby and the next day, you commit an act of murder / suicide, leaving behind your child, family, community?

Back in the 60’s, we used to call to anyone advocating an end to the Vietnam war, or who espoused and aspired to communist ideals as “radicals”. But these were not killers! These were individuals with ideas that were not mainstream, but that nonetheless, had a right to air their views under the 1st Amendment. Some even went to jail for a time, arrested for organizing and or participating in protests that became violent. But it was not their intent to kill indiscriminately. Yes, some did die as a result of social upheaval, but those that participated had a message. Whether it was to end the war, extend fair treatment to minorities, increase pay and benefits for the middle class, whatever, though many disagreed with their methods, maybe even their message, at least their passion could be understood by and articulated to the masses.

No these are not radicals, as they have no message! They have no vision for a better society: to raise certain individuals out of poverty or to make quality healthcare accessible to everyone. Their entire reason to exist has been reduced to acts of terror that have no motive other than to kill as many as possible. To call these monsters animals is to give animals a bad name. The only way to describe and view them is as human shells. Apparitions, that though appearing mortal, have died from the inside out and now seek to die physically in an act of spectacular horror that resembles their nihilistic, apocalyptic concept of creation.

But this is not just a just a recent development, nor one that can only be pinned only on one religious or cultural group. This is a societal epidemic that has been brewing for some time and involves a variety of individuals from a diverse background. See below

Many perpetrators are found to have had a history of depression and taking or just having ceased taking psychotropic drugs.

A contagion-like effect that predisposes unstable individuals to commit mass shootings within 2 weeks of having witnessed one on television has also been noted.

Other profiles of mass killings: More than half of the cases involved school or workplace shootings (12 and 20, respectively); the other 30 cases took place in locations including shopping malls, restaurants, and religious and government buildings. Forty-four of the killers were white males. Only one was a woman. (See Goleta, Calif., in 2006.) The average age of the killers was 35, though the youngest among them was a mere 11 years old. (See Jonesboro, Ark., in 1998.) A majority were mentally troubled—and many displayed signs of mental health problems before setting out to kill.

In conclusion, how then can we who remain begin to cope with this evolving reality?

Each time another one of these incidents happen, the harangue for gun control begins again. I am philosophically split on the issue, I can see merit to both sides of the argument. But one fact has emerged which tends to make me believe tighter gun control alone will not solve this problem: There are between 300-320 million guns already in circulation in the United States. Basically one for every man, woman and child. Even if we could magically stop all “legal” gun sales, there are more than enough units available to any aspiring evildoer. Bare in mind, the latest shooting in San Bernardino was carried out with guns acquired from a friend of the perpetrator. They were originally purchased legally over three years ago, by that individual.

We have to change our behavior! Yes, it’s unfortunate, but true: though we want to continue living “normally”, by doing so, we make ourselves a target. Ah, but I can hear the nay-sayers who will protest that by altering our activities, we are essentially living out of fear. Folks! To say we’re not all afraid is to be in denial. Fear is a normal and appropriate response to these events. And it is useful, because it motivates us to do something to feel more in control, less vulnerable while we work on long term solutions. And this will get solved. History teaches us that societal trends come and go. This is a particularly pernicious one indeed, but it will eventually burn out. In the meantime, we just have to adapt and wait.

Here is what I propose:

Avoid gathering in groups -

Shopping malls, clubs, theaters, restaurants, fairs, parties, etc. Any event that occurring in a public venue with more than 20 or 30 individuals should be avoided. This will be a big adjustment and one that may have a substantial impact on the entertainment industry, but it is necessary. Some venues of course cannot be avoided, such as schools, airports, train stations and places of employment, and security for these facilities should be increased substantially. But where recreation and festivities are concerned, individuals and families should return to meeting in small groups in homes or parks, with people they know.

2. Stay constantly vigilant -

When drinking and partying, it’s easy to become relaxed, in fact that is the objective. But we all need to now find a happy medium between relaxation and vigilance, serenity and awareness. When someone you don’t recognize enters the room, make a mental note. Ask a host or organizer how they’re related to the gathering. It’s very easy for strangers to enter a gathering, relatively unnoticed, because everyone assumes they must be someone else’s friend or family member. Don’t assume. Ask. If no one knows who they are, assume the worst and gather a group to confront the intruder or call the police. Even if your suspicions turn out to be wrong, we must err on the side of caution. This is how calamities can be prevented.

3. Have a plan - Whenever you do have to enter a building, office, airport, restaurant, whatever, get there a little early and scope out an escape route. I know this seems neurotic and paranoid, but it may save your life one day. When violence begins, people’s natural reaction is to huddle in place. The lights are cut, smoke fills the room, screaming and confusion ensue. You have to fight this impulse and speed, like a heat-seeking missile, to the nearest exit.

4. Report odd behavior - In the most recent incident, (San Bernardino), a neighbor observed that an unusual number of deliveries and suspicious activities were taking place at the condo occupied by the couple that would later kill 14 people at a Community Services center. She thought about reporting what she saw, but was concerned that she might be labeled as a “profiler”, since she knew the occupants to be of Middle Eastern origin.

We are a polite, empathetic and cautious culture. We want to believe the best about the people in our midst, but it is just this characteristic that puts us at risk. And it’s is a misperception to pin all mass shootings on religious extremism. Many, especially in schools are carried out by young, white men, or even children who suffer from emotional problems. As a society, we need to do a better job of identifying individuals whose perception of reality is becoming distorted, get them the treatment they need and for god sake, keep them away from guns. But that kind of intervention I fear is a long way off.

Additionally, it’s obvious we cannot count on our dedicated police or intelligence services to keep us safe from every threat. The reality of terrorism and mass murder is ever present, inconspicuous and morphing in unexpected ways. Each person must take personal responsibility for their own safety and that of their family. As Albert Einstein said: the definition of insanity is doing the same thing, over and over and expecting a different result. The potential for violence is now present in every country, large and small cities alike. We must meet the challenge by adapting our behavior to make ourselves and those we love less vulnerable.

11/16/2015

The terrorist attacks we have just witnessed in Brussels are shocking and I wish I could tell you that the worst is over, but I cannot. I have listened carefully to two very different groups on the subject of jihadi terrorism, politicians and intellectuals and the intellectuals have it right. Politicians will have you believe that there is always a military solution. That through the use of boots, bullets and bombs, we will one day restore peace and of course, even as I write it, the entire concept flies in the face of logic. Violence begets violence and even if it were possible to kill every individual who claims membership in one particular terrorist organization or another, a new one is already forming or will form to take it’s place.

This “Western” approach to conflict is akin to the Western medicine: rather than seeking to understand the root cause of illness, it devises toxic interventions to defeat the invader. The problem is, this solution is often worse than the original malady. The patient may in fact die from complications that arise from the very strategies intended to restore health.

A more holistic paradigm is however gaining favor among those who study the formation and evolution of human conflict and they are revealing how in the absence of hope and happiness, radical ideas can easily take hold. To illustrate the simple logic of this idea, let’s assume you have volunteered as a mentor to troubled youth. Your first assignment involves a young man who has recently joined a local gang. He was arrested and his mother, unable to reason with him sent him for special counseling. As luck would have it, you’re a particularly talented counselor and are able to gain the boy’s confidence. He begins to tell you the steps that led him to seek involvement in criminal activities. Here is what he tells you:

__________________________________________________________

“My father left home when I was 10. I have no siblings, so to keep me busy, Mom bought me a game console to play with after school, which she was at work. The gaming kit came preloaded with some boring stuff and I lost interest pretty quickly. But then a friend brought over this cool one that was like a realistic war scene. He and I would be on opposing sides and we were killing each others forces. Each time I hit one of his men, there was lots of blood and screaming. I loved the power.

Then I ordered even more intense games over the internet. I was throwing grenades and setting off bombs. People were getting blown to bits and I couldn’t stop. But then Mom saw that I wasn’t doing my homework, that I would spend every possible moment on these games and she took them all away. Suddenly, I had nothing to do and I missed the action and excitement. Then i saw some guys at school, they looked tough and strong, everyone was afraid of them and they seemed to enjoy the way they effected people. Girls were always wanting to be around them and even though they looked mean, I imagined they were having more fun than anybody.

So one day, I got up the nerve to walk up to one of them during a lunch break. I was afraid, but then also excited, I didn’t know if he would hit me or think I was cool for being brave. To my surprise, he was really easy to talk to and his life story was similar to mine. His Dad was an alcoholic and his Mom was confined to a wheel chair. He had been pretty much on his own since he was 12. Like me, he never really had a family and then he found out about this gang and kind of started hanging around them.

One day, they told him he could join, but the would have to pass an initiation. He said it was really hard and painful, but afterward, he felt really strong and manly and his new family embraced him. They said “man, you’re one tough mother fucker. We really gave it to you and you kept getting up. You’ve really earned a place in our gang. From now on. we’ll always have your back. No one will ever fuck with you again. You’re one of us now”. He said, “It felt so amazing, finally someone liked and respected me”.

“That’s what I wanted and so I joined as well. It solved so many problems. I was never bored anymore, because my homies were always doing something cool, stealing cars, planning attacks on rival gangs, having parties and orgies. I had my first of many sexual encounters at one of these parties. They even paid me out of the money they made selling car parts and drugs. For the first time, I had my own money. I wasn’t stuck at home anymore, thinking what a boring, fucked up life I had”.

Several weeks ago, one of our homies was attacked by a rival gang and it was bad. They stabbed him in the neck, cut off his ear, burned his hair and kicked him in the balls and stomach, over and over. He was in the hospital for days. Our leader, Jack was totally pissed because not only was this guy one of ours, he was also Jack’s brother. He was bent on revenge and we began planning how we were going to fuck them up.

That was the first time I saw a real gun. I held it in my hand and loved the cold heaviness of it. I loved the sound it made when you cocked it and loaded the bullets. We went to a firing range and practiced and it felt so natural, like I had been doing it all my life. And in a way I had, because of those video games. I knew how to aim and what the recoil felt like. Even the sound was familiar. But the smell of gunpowder was something new. It was so sweet to my nose, I couldn’t get enough. My homies were so surprised how well I handled the gun, they told me “you’re going to nail those fuckers, they haven’t got a chance against you dude!”. It made me feel so powerful and important. I went home that night and dreamt about killing all of them. I wanted to do it for Jack. I wanted him to like me. I wanted him to be like the big brother I never had”.

But then Buzz, one of our guys got cold feet. He got scared and went to the police. He told them that the gang was plotting a revenge and they had guns. One day, they showed up at Jack’s house with a warrant. They found all his guns and the names of the guys he was going to hit. He got arrested and they forced him to tell them all the other people that were involved in the gang. That’s how I ended up here. I wasn’t charged with anything, but they forced me to enter youth counseling to keep me from getting in more trouble.

__________________________________________________________

Now, imagine this same young man, four years later. He is now 19. He cannot find a job, he has no positive male role models, he has dropped out of high school and he spends his days playing video games or getting into trouble. One day, while surfing the internet, he finds a video about making money “fighting for justice in Syria”. They offer any man or woman who wants to join, free plane fare, adventure, glory, riches, brotherhood and advancement in the “new world order”. He’s not educated about the conflict in the Middle East. He doesn’t listen to the news or read the paper, he has no idea what is really going on there, hell, he barely knows what day it is. Why should he care? He has no future. Suddenly, this video offers everything that seems unattainable at home…. and he signs up.

This is the typical profile of young men, who by the thousands, are leaving home and heading for conflicts in Iraq, Syria and Afghanistan. We are witnessing now that these radical conflicts act like a vortex, drawing in directionless young people through the use of social media and once there, they are brainwashed through a well orchestrated indoctrination process and if they live long enough, they begin to adopt the persona of a jihadi fighter. They are loathe to return home to the land that they now reject as the part of the world where “the infidels” reside. Even if they are able to leave and rejoin their community, they are forever changed. They see the world differently and are unrecognizable to their friends and family. It is a tragedy of incalculable proportions and it appears that our current strategy is only serving to intensify the magnetic effect this conflict is having on our youth. What can be done?

As with all campaigns of deception, any brainwashing process involves sympathizing with a vulnerable individual's plight, by laying down certain truths One such truth is that the world economy has been severely damaged by greed and mismanagement and those at the bottom of the economic ladder, namely the poor, lower middle class and especially young men, see no prospect for a brighter future. Another truth is that men have become increasingly insignificant in Western society. Women are exceeding men in college enrollment and graduation rates, they are willing and able to take on and excel in the new global economy, which emphasizes communication and networking, where as the skills that men intrinsically bring to the table, those that involve strength and manual dexterity are becoming obsolete. The products upon which our civilization relies are now being manufactured cheaply in Asia. They are so cheap in fact that when they break, there is no point to pay a worker to fix them. It’s easier to just buy a new one.

With no vision for a way to earn a living, dating, marrying and starting a family must seem like a rite of passage that is closed to them. To say nothing of the fact that they themselves may have been raised in a broken home. Then, along comes one of several terrorist organizations vying for their attention. They promise friendship, family ties, prestige, responsibility, meaning and purpose and most of all a way to take revenge against the status quo. And let’s be honest, when it comes to providing jobs, a living wage, opportunities for advancement, adequate access to food, shelter, health care and education, many countries get a failing grade. In response, a revolution is quickly building, but unlike revolutions of the 60’s and 70’s that attempted, unsuccessfully to address racial and income disparities, young people are no longer taking to the streets, looting, throwing rocks, blocking streets, fighting with police and getting thrown in jail. No, theirs is a quiet revolution, one that takes place in bedrooms and libraries throughout the world. One that is inspired by images of power, glory and opportunity via the very nexus of communication that was ironically intended to unite the world: the internet.

How then can we rid the world of this pernicious threat? Politicians will tell you we can spend our way to safety, by going after the bad guys and killing them. But honestly, the “bad guys” are being recruited faster than they can be killed. And even if it were possible to kill everyone in a given organization, another one that already exists or that quickly forms will take it’s place. The threat does not come only from one group or another, but rather from a broad based and growing anger about the increasing disparity between the haves and the have-nots.

Therefore the solution to this problem doesn’t lie in exporting military might to far-flung regions of the Middle East, but rather committing resources here at home to create real opportunities for each and every individual to succeed. Spend more money on our crumbling infrastructure, repairing roads, bridges, railways, tunnels, water mains and sewer systems and train young men and women to participate in that renovation, paying them a living wage as they learn.

Improve mental health screening for children and young adults to identify those at risk of going on to either commit crimes or join gangs and terrorist organizations. Place a rating system on violent video games similar to those instituted in the past to protect children from explicit movies. Games with an X or XX would be unable to be sold to children under 18.

And finally, reinstitute the draft. Yes, the draft, but not to serve overseas and perhaps be killed in a senseless war. Rather to join a new National Guard, whose mission will be to provide protection for schools, libraries, hospitals, parks, playgrounds, government buildings and cities. While our police do an admirable job of responding to crime, their mandate does not include prevention. If we were to embark on this ambitious campaign to remake our cities, provide equal access to food, medicine and education to all youth and families, it would still take many years to reverse the tide of discontent we are now seeing rise up against us. Even under the best of circumstances, these acts of terror will continue for several years and we need to have a plan in place to keep our children and all citizens safe. That will involve maintaining a military presence at all public venues and institutions. Accomplishing this will require a huge influx of manpower and the only way to provide that will be through conscription. But unlike sending Johnny or Janet to a Afghanistan, Iraq or Syria, from which they are likely to return in a box or wheel chair, service in the National Guard would provide discipline, camaraderie and real world problem solving skills in their own town or city, while paving their way for future success in any number of chosen fields of study provided by the Guard.

Yes, I know we are all loathe to see officers with semi-automatic weapons guarding the entrances to our schools and institutions. But becoming a victim of a terrorist attack in our own neighborhood will be an even more difficult pill to swallow. And from what we have just witnessed in Paris, it is very likely that one or more terrorist groups are right this minute, planning to do just that somewhere in the United States.

Don’t be soothed into an unrealistic sense of security by believing that the right president or the right military approach will keep terror from our shores. It is coming folks and the road to a more peaceful world will not be paved through attack and revenge strategies, but by providing would-be jihadi’s a better future at home than they think they will get by fighting with ISIS.

11/09/2015

There is emerging science that now is validating what teachers of ancient spiritual traditions have been trying to communicate for centuries: that we, our bodies, our actions, even our emotions and all creation inhabit one fluid dimension. A dimension which Max Planck called “The Matrix”.

No this is not the stuff of Tom Cruise movies or Hollywood special effects, but there is no doubt that many of the concepts for that script were inspired by Prof. Planck’s early work in the area of Quantum Physics: a term and field of study that he pioneered.

Our western religious teachings and even past scientific perspectives held that each of us is a self contained entity, separate and apart from everything around us, save God. From this mindset, we have built a civilization that operates on the concept that competition and conflict are a necessary part of human life.

Darwin taught us that survival depends on being the strongest and that ideology has permeated every aspect of human interaction. We have observed in society that a desire to control rather than cooperate breeds conflict, which begets violence. Eventually revenge becomes the only objective.

In the corporate and political world, the relentless drive for supremacy compels governments and companies to break laws and behave in an immoral fashion, putting peoples health, financial security, even their very lives at risk, to achieve greater profits or hegemonic control over their constituents.

But this chaotic existence is in opposition to everything we are now learning about how the universe operates. The most desirable result of these discoveries would of course be humanity evolving to live more harmoniously-like the seamless field of energy that we now know is holding all existence together.

As individuals though, we have little power to control global affairs directly. Competition over precious resources, economic prosperity, arable land, water, energy, religious ideals and even living space have made our planet smaller, causing disparate cultures to rub elbows and struggle for supremacy.

But that doesn't mean that in the absence of a collective epiphany, there is no hope.

How can we then, as individuals, begin to incorporate these exciting developments into our lives to achieve greater effectiveness and happiness?

_____________________________________________________

By reorienting our relationship to world events

from one of apathy to one of innovation.

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For those of you who were born to the Millennial generation or are even younger, you may never have known a world without computers, the internet, phones and texting, etc. But rest assured, the world of global communication was once very different and it wasn’t that long ago.

In the 1970’s and 80’s, when I was collaborating with a friend across the country to write songs, I would record my guitar and voice on to a cassette tape and mail it to him.

Now of course, we can use Skype and send our performance “real-time”, from screen to screen. And while I can now save ideas and images to my computer, the songs and poems I was composing as a young man now live only in my library as aging reminders of a bygone age. An age when the only ways to document your thoughts were either through the use of pencil and paper or typewriter. But thanks to intrepid visionaries, like Steve Jobs, a completely new paradigm of recording and communicating thoughts has been woven into the fabric our lives.

Other such (now-a-days, ubiquitous), technologies that were not so long ago only the stuff of science fiction movies are digital cameras, cell phones, all electric cars and solar-powered homes. Yes, we now all accept these as mundane realities, but they would not exist if not for the creative thoughts and actions of people no so different from you and me.

My point is, it is possible for one person or several people working together, to change the world. Your life represents a microcosm of the creative power of the universe and when your ideas and passions are focused into one intense beam of effort, amazing things can result.

But you don’t have to be a Steve Jobs or Elon Musk to make a difference. You can use innovation to influence improvements to your home, your company or your community.

Conceive new ways live more sustainably with Nature. Drive less, use water and other resources more thoughtfully and most importantly, find a patch of terra firma where you can begin to cultivate life. Our incredible planet is endlessly productive and with a little help, every place on Earth is capable of supporting plant and animal life.

My girlfriend and I have patch of land the our backyard that was once barren, with the exception of some opportunistic weeds. We decided to turn it into a garden, which was no easy task. First of all, the land is sloped, so any water applied to plants there, would result in wasted runoff. So we had to use a terracing technique, as old as the Gardens of Babylon. Every culture throughout history that has been faced with the challenge of sloping land has devised a similar solution.

It took about 6 months of intense labor and a fair amount of materials, but now we have 16 fruit trees, a vegetable garden, grapes, berries and a new vantage point from which we can enjoy the setting sun every evening. From the Earth’s bounty, we now create delicious meals, preserve fruits to enjoy later or give as gifts. And through the maintenance of our little farm, we attain all the exercise and sunshine we need, while strengthening our relationship though the enjoyment of a shared activity.

This too is innovation and though small in scale, it has the ripple effect of influencing all those who witness or benefit from the effort.

The take home message here is: Pour your love and care into some sacred creation and watch your efforts bare the fruit of abundance and satisfaction. Regardless of how big or how small, it is through this change in your perceptual relationship to Nature, in all it’s magical and mysterious perfection, that you will begin to discover hope.

Random Samples to Get You Started

Rare Books, Gifts & Collectibles at Amazing Prices

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What is The Happiness Tree?

This blog and its companion
book are a direct challenge to the preconceived notions,
fears, biases and flawed approaches that hold many of us back from
success in relationships, work, creativity and most importantly, life
satisfaction.

Like many of you, from my
adolescent years, I was seeking guidance to
help me understand the complex interplay between myself and the world
at large: A sort of “Life Manual”. I would peruse book stores and act
on recommendations by friends and respected “gurus”, and never found a
book, program or methodology that connected all the dots.

I’d read one book about
Spirituality, and another about Self Esteem.
Yet another about The Creative Process followed by a treatise on
Relationships. Each book seemed to partially address one piece of the
puzzle, but not how that element fit into or coordinated with all the
others.
Then at a dark, pivotal point in my mid-life, I felt the need for just
such a paradigm shift. A complete overhaul of my belief systems and a
new scaffolding upon which to construct my future. I was sure that in
the new frontier of the internet, I’d be able to find just the right
message, delivered just the right way that would provide me that “Aha
moment” I so desperately desired. But alas, I found only bits and
pieces, not a cohesive, holistic approach to creating sustainable
happiness.

So, I built
it myself.

One of the pearls of wisdom
that stuck with me during my many years of
searching, was that ‘all the tools and information we need to create a
productive, happy life, are already inside of us’. This made sense to
me. Though not a religious person, I have always believed that we were
brought
into this life to fulfill a purpose. And if that was so, then it would
stand to reason that we’d be provided the skills necessary to manifest
that purpose or at least the means to acquire them. From that
perspective, our challenge then, from the moment we’re born, (or some
would say, even before that), is to discover our mission, then develop
the energy, passion and abilities to fulfill it.

Along the way though, most of
us get bogged down in the details. To use
a driving metaphor, we head off perhaps in the right direction and then
hit a pothole. Our vehicle becomes temporarily disabled and so we hitch
a ride and become a passenger on someone else’s journey. Through
detours and switchbacks, we may
spend years retracing our steps in an effort
to regain the momentum of those earlier times. Along the way,
circumstance or destiny places what feels like insurmountable barriers
in our path,
causing us to rethink our entire rai·son d'ê·tre.

This is usually when the pivot
happens. When our belief systems
collapse, leaving us feeling incapable of addressing even the simplest
task, for lack of confidence in our own abilities or the very
righteousness of humanity. I built The Happiness Tree for this critical
juncture in my own life and by extension, to help you through yours.

This system is named The
Happiness Tree, for a reason. By following its
intuitive structure: Roots; Trunk; Limbs and Branches, we begin to
organize the seemingly complex interplay between ourselves and others,
into a visual framework, allowing us to step back for the first time
and see the entire global connections that make up our lives. From this
vantage point, areas that are weak or unbalanced are revealed. We are
then guided toward achieving a broader and more effective
distribution of our time, energy, talents, passions and goals through
the implementation of practical, common sense strategies. Branch, by
branch we begin to fill out our own unique tree, from top to bottom,
enhancing our confidence, relationships, creativity, purpose and
ultimately, our life satisfaction and happiness.

Let "The
Happiness Tree" support you on your quest to achieve the life
you’ve always dreamed of. Just read, absorb, practice. evolve and
become the manifestation of Joy in your own life and that of those you
love.