Thursday, March 11, 2010

I found my niche in music and it is where I come closest to my inner being, closest to what I really want to do in this lifetime. Like a good meal or a good night sleep, singing raises my energy and inspires me to believe that I can be more than what I am now, above my fears and beyond my limitations. It is always accepting and forgiving- I can always go back in case I hit a wrong note or made a wrong turn or pause, never letting me down or leaving me empty. That is why I cannot get it out of my system. I sing on my way to the office, inside the bus or when I do the dishes or the laundry. As I lift my head up and open my mouth, my voice escalates with every tune that comes out of it. The soothing words bounce off of my tongue and release the tension I have within. Even if the sounds aren’t perfect or correct, every little bit helps me get through the day. When stressed, nothing helps me more than singing. When I do it, I sing with all of me, putting everything I can into it. And though I still get out of sync, in my own time, I can be in perfect harmony to the pleasure of my listening audience. Until then, I am always like an anxious child waiting in line for my turn to sing again.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Its one thing to say I love you. It’s another to make the person feel you really do. Is it really possible to love out of presence? I know of a young mother who almost lost her life due to diabetes. Her eldest son misses her so much, he cried hard just to be brought to her. But while she longs for her children, she also yearns for her own mother. She grew up, got married, bore children and get in and out of the hospital without her. Her mother got old, remarried and carry on with life without her children too. She would not tell the reason why her mother can’t come home. But may be her death will. But how will you say sorry to the person you loved but never see grow weak and strong, strong and weak each day? Would you say I love you but can’t see you? Death can be really ugly, taking away good memories and leaving pains, sadness and fears. Loving out of time and space happens but hardly proves anything at all. For love is all about caring, struggling and growing with the ones you love.

About Me

My blog is about me, my family, and my random thoughts about life as a mother, wife, and every roles in between. If anything, blogging has expanded my mindset and has been a reminder to me of how diverse (and extraordinary) the world is.