The lottery has been dubbed a "tax on the poor": "Multiple studies of state lotteries have found that those with low incomes spend a higher percentage of their income on lottery tickets than wealthier individuals." Again, these studies did not take into account that time we won $15 on a Deal or No Deal instant win scratchcard we bought at Citgo.

Like any investment, it is important to step back and look at your purchase with a shrewd eye. Ask yourself the following questions before buying a lotto ticket:

"Am I due?"

"Did a bird shit on me today?"

"Would I feel bad if I didn't pick my numbers today and they came up for the Power Ball?"

"Wouldn't my life be easier if I won $300 million?"

"Which is closer, the gas station where I buy my lotto ticket or a casino?"

"Which do I prefer, working every day at the same old job or living on a supermodel-captained megayacht?"

"Am I a resident in a small village where they force the head of each family to draw a piece of paper on June 27th of each year as part of a sadistic and violent ritual?" (Only applicable for characters in the Shirley Jackson short story "The Lottery.")