Monday, June 28, 2010

13 years ago today...

I married the most wonderful man ever.
We went to elementary school together, we went to high school together, we attended the same church...he dated who is now my sister-in-law :) hee hee hee...yes, it's a funny story!!! And NO it's not wierd! Just the way God worked things out! My brother and sis-in-law were married a few years before we were.
ANYHOW, in high school...I really didn't like Brett at all. He was, what I thought of, as a typical football quarterback jock. He had a "different" sense of humor that didn't appeal to me. However, I really was never interested in him during any of our school years anyhow so other than knowing him as the quarterback at highschool, our communication was next to nothing. UNTIL he upgraded an algebra class and sat directly behind me! How funny!!!!!
It wasn't until we were both working with the youth group at our church and began to interact more that I began to realize he wasn't really how I had pegged him at all. He was quite funny, and charming, and fun to be around. So an innocent friendship began, and then blossomed.
I remember EXACTLY the day I realized that "oh my gosh...I like this guy and I'm excited to see him!" It was a Friday night youth night...and I had butterflies all the way to the church knowing we were going to hang out through the evening events.
And from there...well, neither of us recall a structured "dating" scenario. We just hung out all the time. And more and more I realized what an amazing person he was!
I had been through a string of painful relationships...one very emotionally abusive relationship, and at this point in my life I wasn't sure if I was ready to allow another person in. I DO remember saying to God the year before "the next guy I let myself date BETTER be the one you have chosen for me...or I'm becoming a nun!"
And it's funny because Brett had said that he too was tired of the dating game and hoped that his next relationship would be one with substance. (I learned that info AFTER we got married!)
Our wedding day was amazing...and HOT HOT HOT!!!!!!!!!!! And I had booked too much time between photos and the reception, so I went home and got OUT of my wedding dress, got in to a tank top and shorts and went to the reception room to help set up. I remember the attendants at the room asking who got married and I said "ME!", and they laughed that I actually got out of my dress and was there setting up. They asked me to stop by the front desk on my way back from getting back IN to my wedding dress so that they could see me.
We had the usual ideas, dreams, goals, hopes that I'm sure many people have. And children were always front and center. I remember when we finally decided "ok, lets start trying". I remember my excitment and squeeling with joy.
Wow...I remember that like it was yesterday!
We have seen the best, we have seen the worst. We went through 8 years of unexplained infertility and various treatments with heart break at every end. We went through 2 fresh IVF rounds, and have said good bye to our first identical twins, and now one of our twin sons just last year.
We have had ups, we have had major downs. We have laughed, we have cried deeper than any couple should be expected to. We have had fun times and we have had agonizing moments.
We have been through so much together. And so many are often surprised at how strong we have remained, especially through the death of Zac. And even though we knew that statistically speaking there is a higher chance of a marriage not surviving after such an experience, we often wondered HOW such an intimate experience could pull two people apart. Only once have a caught a glimpse of how it may be possible. But we fight on. We love on. We stay solidly together because of our love. And YES, it takes MAJOR work at times. What marriage doesn't! Your lying if you say it doesn't! (in my opinion).
We have good days, we have bad days...but we have each other. And I couldn't be more greatful for a more wonderful, loving, supportive, caring husband.
He has seen me in the darkest of days, and he has always been there to offer his hand to pick me up, and his arms to hold me, and his shirts to drench in tears.
He has seen me in the best of days, and we laugh and we joke and we poke fun at each other.
I am SO glad that all my other relationships ended, because I know not one of those guys could have ever been who I needed in my life. I know not one of them could have been the rock that my sweet Brett is to me.
If you know Brett...you have the honor of calling him friend. He will be there whenever you need a hand. He will listen if you ever need to talk. He will laugh with you, and he will never hide the truth from you. And of course...if you like to golf...he would be more than happy to assist you in that outing! hee hee hee.
If you know Brett...you are lucky. He is one of a kind.
If you don't know Brett...you are missing out.
For those of you who have stuck by Brett in our darkest of days, and have had the guts to cry along side him...you are a treasure, and I know he would say how thankful he is for you.
When you know Brett...you know that you will be respected and you will have gained a wonderful friend.
I know I sure have. I know I have been blessed beyond measure to call Brett not only my husband, but my dearest, closest, truest of friends.
My husband is a wonderful man...and I am so blessed to be called his wife.
Thank you for 13 of the most up and down years TOGETHER! And thank you for never faulting me for being myself. Thank you for loving me not only in my best moments, but also my most painful.
Thank you for saying..."I do"!!!
I love you!!!

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About Me

After 10 years of unexplained infertility and after our 1st IVF and then loss of our first babies - a triplet prior to 6 weeks and then our identical twins days before 12 weeks (Dec. 6 '07)...round 2 of IVF blessed us with fraternal twin boys - Zac Michael and Evan Brett. After delivering the boys at 28 weeks 1 day (March 6, 2009 - Zac 2lb 5ou and Evan 2lb 9ou), and three days after their birth, Zac went home to heaven to be with his brothers (March 9, 2009). 66 days in NICU and 2 weeks before my actual due date...our precious son Evan came home weighing just under 5lbs! Our story and journey from the beginning can be read here.