For a while, Facebook wouldn’t allow you to list “civil union” or “domestic partnership” as your relationship status. To this day, I don’t think that they allow any type of polyamorous relation to be listed, not with more than one person listed in the partnership at least.

I had to call someone up to get them to tell a computer to do something. Why couldn't I just talk to the computer directly?

My bank makes you call in for just about every little change to an account. They always try to upsell you on junk you don’t need and half the time they don’t seem to understand what it is that you’re asking for.

Who eats these individually wrapped pickles that I keep seeing in gas stations here?

Is this some sort of covert drug paraphernalia thing? Sometimes it’s only a quarter pickle slice type of deal.What kind of a person goes into a gas station and buys a part of a pickle? It’s just weird.

What is with people that put so many cracker in their soup that it’s not really soup anymore? I think they just really want an excuse to eat crackers. My patented cracker-flavoured spread is the ultimate solution for them.

Where does "teehee" come from? It's impossible to make a "t" noise while laughing.