A Paladin will tell you he'll lay down his sword. Really? Wow, dude's unarmed. WHACK. Dying is for fools. Amateurs. Here’s your cold coffee. Buh-bye. I dare you to keep up with me. Thought you were messing with one dude? Sorry, Paladin. We’re Vatican assassins. How complicated can it be?

Gnarly gnarlingtons. And gnarly you are not. I’m going to win every moment. I’ve spent close to the last decade effortlessly and magically converting your tin cans into pure gold. Without me, you wouldn't be in the spotlight. I don’t know, winning, anyone? Rhymes with winning? Anyone? Yeah, that would be me.

Imagine what I would have done with my fire-breathing fists. Let’s hook up and just bring fiery death. There’s a new sheriff in town. And he has an army of assassins. There’s my life. Deal with it. Oh, wait, can’t process it? LOSERS.

But yeah, I think too many would-be proselytizers don't realize when they and/or their position isn't persuasive enough... and they they keep right on badgering their would-be convertee anyway. For example...

It's a violent torpedo of truth. I'm living it and I'm winning it! Forget the rest of these sad trolls and their lottery ticket pipe dreams. I've cashed in and my tickets are being bought and everyone's lining up to see the main attraction. Stay tuned to the news because this meteorologist predicts a forecast of heavy snow this spring.

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