We talk about domestic box office a lot, but international markets are where the real money is made. In fact, of the 25-highest-grossing movies worldwide, the smallest percentage of total budget earned internationally was 59 percent. This could go a long way to explaining why movies aren’t better, since with few exceptions, broad strokes are what play in foreign markets (and/or are what studios think will play, and thus spend a buttload of marketing money on). You know how the French are, they can barely tell a skunk from a cat that got paint spilled on it.

Pajiba already did the heavy lifting here, so I’m just going to have a cigarette and let the block quote do the work.

First, some fun facts: Internationally, the top ten all-time movies added two new entries this year, The Avengers at number three, and The Dark Knight Rises at number seven. Although it didn’t perform as well as The Dark Knight domestically, Rises bested it internationally by $200 million.

Which could add some credence to the theory that the Aurora shooting hurt TDKR‘s box office. Not that that even rates in terms of important impacts of the Aurora shooting, but there you go.

Meanwhile, Skyfall became the highest gross Bond film to date (and the first to cross $1 billion worldwide). Among the year’s top 25 films internationally, Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax (61 percent) and The Hunger Games (59 percent) were the movies with the highest percentage of their box office from North America, while The Intouchables (97 percent) and Ice Age: Continental Drift (81 percent) were the two films with the most box-office proceeds from overseas.

The highest grossing original property was Brave, followed by Ted, which was also the highest grossing comedy of the year. Titanic 3D was the highest grossing film not originally released in 2012, and two films considered box-office failures in the United States (Battleship and John Carter) both broke the top 25.

1. The Avengers— $1.5 billion

2. The Dark Knight Rises — $1.081 billion

3. Skyfall — $1 billion

4. Ice Age: Continental Drift — $875 million

5. Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part II — $799 million

6. The Amazing Spider-Man — $752 million

7. Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted — $742 million

8. The Hobbit: Unexpected Journey — $692 million [so far]

9. The Hunger Games — $686 million

10. MIB 3 — $624 million

11. Brave — $535 million

12. Ted — $501 million

13. The Intouchables — $420 million

14. Prometheus — $402 million

15. Snow White and the Huntsmen — $396 million

16. Taken 2 — $365 million

17. Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax — $348 million

18. Titanic 3D — $343 million

19. Journey 2: The Mysterious Island — $325 million

20. Hotel Transylvania — $311 million

21. Life of Pi — $304 milllion

22. Battleship — $302 million

23. Wrath of Titans — $302 million

24. Expendables 2 — $300 million

25. John Carter — $282 million

John Carter famously cost $250 million to make, and Daily Beast claimed it needed to earn $400 million to break even, putting Disney’s estimate of a $200 million loss a bit high, but not out of the realm of possibility. Which is sad because… it wasn’t that bad. As far as silly fantasy movies go, it was much better than The Hobbit. I’m sure lots will be made of why John Carter wasn’t a hit – no loin cloths! no more movies set on Mars! the aliens should be blue! no more manipulating gravity, it doesn’t play! – but to really get a fair comparison of box office appetites, we’d have to go back to the first Lord of the Rings, rename it “Frodo Baggins,” and have all the marketing consist entirely of reminding you that the main character’s name was Frodo Baggins.

“You are… Frodo? Frodo Baggins?”

“I am, Frodo, Frodo Baggins – of the Shire.”

(*cue action montage set to dub step*) (*cut to chanting crowd*)

“FRO-DO! FRO-DO! FRO-DO! FRO-DO!”

If we learn anything from 2012, let it be that naming your film after your protagonist’s boring name is a horrible idea. “This summer, Humphrey Bogart in… RICK BLAINE…”

Oh, and to save everyone else the trouble: 13. Intouchables, yeah it’s a real movie. But it’s from that country where they don’t know the difference between a skunk and cat that had paint spilled on it.

The French are responsible for the “OSS 117″ movies, which are hilarious JAmes Bond spoofs by the same guy that did “The Artists.” The second one, especially, where they go to Brazil (can’t recall the name) is awesome.

SERIOUSLY. I mean there’s a dude living a semi-charmed kind of life. I remember the stupid things, the mood rings, the bracelets and the beads, nickles and dimes, yours and mine, did you cash in on your dreams?

It’s actually encouraging, considering that Family Guy got cancelled and was only brought back because it did surprisingly well in DVD sales. KInd of like how Apatow became the king of cinema comedy only after leading the league in doomed TV shows.

But then I said, what about Weekend at Bernie’s? She said, I think I remember the film–and as I recall, I *think* we both kinda liked it.

I’m intrigued by the possibility of *not* being amused by dick and fart jokes. To the VOD machine!
Speaking of which, Killer Joe is now available for home viewing. Jeepers H. Creepers do I want McConnaughey to be my best friend.

“The Intouchables (97 percent) and Ice Age: Continental Drift (81 percent) were the two films with the most box-office proceeds from overseas”

Intouchables makes sense, because it was made “over there.” But the only explanation I can give for Ice Age 4 is that Ray Romano is considered the new Jerry Lewis and the Euro-trash loves him, ironically.

By my count, 17 of the top 25 (9 of the top 10) in this list are either prequels, sequels, or remakes/re-releases, which pretty much sums up why Hollywood has no reason to come up with anything original anymore. Also if you include movies based on books (and board games) you get 21 out of 25 movies. Fairly pathetic…but not at all unexpected.

…Hollywood has no reason to come up with anything original anymore.
No kidding. We can complain about what’s out there, but people still are leaning towards films that have something recognizable or familiar. Either 1) people simply want to be entertained and won’t take the time to look for new stuff or 2) people are too scared to risk the costs on a bad experience or 3) both