NCIS Opinion Article

You know you are a NCIS Fan when.......................

# Your computer malfunctions and you're looking around for McGee to fix it.
# The television network shows a promo for a re-screen and you can name episode title AND number.
# You wander the convenience stores hoping to find Caff-Pow.
# You have an overwhelming desire to head slap anyone who ticks you off
# You find yourself scanning bookstore shelves for a copy of "Deep Six"
# You find yourself calling the office junior 'Probie'
# You see everywhere someone who reminds you of an NCIS character, you could swear they were their double, when they're probably nothing like them!
# You actually consider a spider web tattoo on your neck
# You begin building a boat in your basement just like the one Gibbs has
# You super-glued your co-worker's fingers to his keyboard and then left the room
# You look on the Internet for a Mighty Mouse stapler
# You postpone needed surgery because you might still be under when the show comes on
# You ask a bunch of nuns if you can bowl with them
# You take to drinking strong black sugarless pop by the gallon
# You teeter on impossible stilettos
# You confuse English expressions
# You start talking to any dead creature
# You talk to your PC, CD player, TV and all other forms of technology in your life
# You hold conferences with your neighbours in the lift in your block of flats
# You drive at breakneck speed ignoring traffic and traffic signs
# You take to wearing a dog collar with studs or spikes instead of pearl necklaces
# You dye your hair red
# You're convinced your life will be complete if only you can obtain a farting hippo stuffed toy that you can name Bart
# You dye your hair black and wear it in pigtails
# You become a Goth
# You start wearing black lipstick
# You have a penchant for long winded stories
# Your catchphrase becomes "D'ya think?" or "On it boss!"
# You write novels using your workmates as your source of inspiration
# You get into forensic science
# Your favourite hat is a bright orange beanie
# You only notice young men who wear Italian designer label suits/footwear or silver-haired blue-eyed men who buy their clothes from Sears
# You start referring to water cooler gossip as 'scuttlebutt'
# You refer to the loo/restroom as the 'head' -- and you were never in the Navy
# You talk about 'zulu time'
# You 'profile' any potential friend/boyfriend/girlfriend/customer/neighbour
# You insist that the second B in your name stands for 'B******' - even if your name doesn't have a B in it!
# You can eat cold pizza without your stomach churning
# You can go on a frat holiday to Panama Beach
# You have frat brothers even if you haven't the foggiest what that is
# You start threatening people that bug you that you'll kill them 18 different ways with a paper clip, if they don't shut up.
# Take to calling men 'skirt chasers'
# Seriously look into getting color-contacts and try to copy the exact tint of Gibbs' eyes. [or which ever character floats your boat.]
# You give up sunbathing to get that alabaster coloured skin
# You sleep with a gun under your pillow
# You give your lover honey dust
# You take a liking to the smell of sawdust
# You have problems using chopsticks when eating Chinese take-away
# The idea of building a boat in your basement, even though you will have no way to get it out of the basement when completed without demolishing several walls, seems like a sane, rational, intelligent thing to do.
# Drinking bourbon neat becomes your favourite tipple
# You give up watching the 6 Nations Cup (rugby) to watch baseball
# Get your partner to wear comfortable loafers instead of Doc Martens
# You start addressing people, particularly men, by their surname, dropping the 'mister' entirely.
# You connect with kids when before you'd have run a mile
# You become versed in ballistics
# You become fascinated by military acronyms
# You begin calling your boss "Director"
# You call wild drivers "Zivas"
# You discover you can instill fear in people simply by glaring at them
# When a friend asks for support you say 'on your six'
# You think the FBI is inefficient
# You consider you and your lover having a quickie at the local morgue
# You begin to wonder what sex in an armoured personnel carrier would be like.
# You suddenly like men dressed in Gunnery Sergeant uniforms with or without the cover (cap/hat)
# You want your kids/lover/partner to carry a GPS chip about their person so they can be located at any time
# You become a bomb disposal expert
# You consider renaming your children/grandchildren Jethro and Abby
# You spend most of your time reading/writing NCIS Fiction on Fan Fiction.Net. (guilty!)
# You buy DVD copies of movies that have NCIS cast members in, even though they are movies you wouldn't normally watch. (guilty!)
# You spend another large amount of your time reading NCIS Fiction on Fan Fiction.Net and NCISArchive.Net
# You get DVD copies of shows with NCIS cast members even if you don't like the shows
# You rout You Tube for interviews/snippets of said cast
# You're favourite car is a sedan
# You have several duplicate mobiles/cellphones in case you break one
# You have a new respect for the Israeli Army--especially the female members
# You call the outsourced staff at your office 'liaison' workers
# And if your big boss is female you address her as Madam, Director, or Ma'am
# You refer to a stethoscope as a 'Rubber Ducky'
# The randy smart-aleck male in your office is nicknamed DiNozzo
# You start calling your husband/significant other My little hairy butt.
# You ask your husband/significant other to call you Sweetcheeks instead of honey or babe.
# You head slap everyone close to you who says/does something annoying.
# You start acting out your fav scenes in your fav episodes
# You call your friends/family NCIS characters
# Any long winded speaker or who frequently goes off at a tangent is affectionately called a Ducky
# You begin to use "Elf Lord" as a pet name for your significant other (I don't currently have one, but I can assure you it's my new favorite pet name)
# You want to buy an old fashioned typewriter, regardless of whether or not you actually write
# You hope to take up knife-throwing in the near future
# You look for "Lo Ball" CDs in every electronics section you visit and online stores like Amazon.com (guilty!)
# You don't mind starting work at 7 in the morning (I'm usually in the office at 0630... what does that make me?)
# Having your weekend date interrupted to do some urgent work
# You comment 'nice cover' to an elderly gentleman wearing an NCIS hat. He proceeds to inform you that it is not merely a prop, but one he received from his daughter who is an NCIS agent! You are thoroughly impressed and want to ask if she has another. (Thanks for letting us play in the TV version of your world, NCIS. Stay safe.)
# You go to work with a cold and when co-workers suggest that you see a doctor you look for Ducky.
# You start looking for DiNozzo, Kate, Gibbs and Col. Mann when you see service members in uniform. (And DiNozzo among the Village People!)
# You hit the Internet/library to find out what poison ivy looks like because you don't want to end up like poor McGee. (You also find the proportions for the baking soda/vinegar paste, and/or keep a bottle of calamine lotion with you at all times, just in case.)
# Your reason for never getting a cold is because no virus/germ/bug would dare to even get near you - 'cos if Gibbs can get away with it, so can you
# You try to imitate Gibbs' glare when people don't do what you want when you want in the way you want.
# You get really excited when you find out you grew up in the same town Mark Harmon's father was from!
# Every time you see a Dodge Charger, you look inside expecting to see Gibbs, Tony, McGee, and Ziva in the car.
# You get a mini and drive Ziva-style (like a maniac)
# You hunt perfume counters looking for one that smells like gunpowder or bourbon (even though you know Abby made them... you still hope to get lucky).
# You hunt for a cologne that smells like sawdust to give to your man (and you wish Abby was around to create one for you).
# You get up before human hours to get a promo DVD and then watch the one episode all day
# You watch an old promo video for hours because there is a couple of seconds of NCIS in the 'all the shows' ad promo.
# The only prospective boyfriends you're interested in have silver hair and blue eyes who drink coffee like there was no tomorrow.
# You realise mustang is not only a kind of horse but also a kind of car (you're doing extremely well when you know it's a Ford)
# Your mobile ring tone is the NCIS theme tune
# Your PC or cellphone (mobile) wallpaper is one of the cast/whole cast
# Your PC screen saver has NCIS scenes
# When you say something rocks, you're not exactly talking about music :-))
# You realise not all geeks are nerds
# You start blabbering on like Abby
# You talk geek-speak, not English
# Friends/co-workers ask you to translate geek-speak
# You are suddenly bad at computers and all technology
# You are suddenly good at computers and all technology
# You decide to do computer classes to be more like McGee and Abby
# You call technology doo-dah's
# You find yourself getting angrier more easily
# You get shy and stutter more
# You want to be able to do everything that the cast can do (never mind the fact that they have stunt doubles!)
# You are considering taking art classes so you can sketch Tony {or whichever character} when they come on the screen.
# You believe you know everything there is to know about the Navy.
# You ramble off a bit of computer terms, having no clue what they mean.
# You search high and low for a paint gun so you can shoot your favourite toy in the head.
# You watch every movie Tony mentions on the show for 2 reasons, either because you are interested in the movie, or simply because you do everything that Tony says.
# You seriously consider getting a coffin to sleep in.
# You say your occupation is "making fan art and writing fan fiction"
# You take part in all the active threads on the site
# You've created about half the active threads on the site
# You start listening to Israeli rap.
# You make Mii's of all the NCIS Characters on your Wii (Even Lee and Fornell)
# You learn how to kill with a paper clip
# Your idea of computer maintenance is to continually hit it until it works.
# You start calling everyone named Abigail, "Abbs" (I do this with my friend's daughter. --abbysciuto77)
# You google images of female Israeli soldiers
# You acquire an acute interest in the different post-mortem protocols
# You discuss the pros and cons of the Scotland Yard and Virchow post-mortem protocols, likewise any of the others used
# You hear something that you swear is a quote from the show and whip out your dvd sets and watch until you find that quote.
# You start keeping an extra set of clothes at the office just in case
# You call odd things in your life "hinky" (Guilty as charged!)
# You call Mark Harmon/Jethro Gibbs or any othersilver haired man in your life your "silver-haired fox"
# You discover (or are reminded) that a "Gypsy" is an off the clock cab driver, not someone who tells fortunes and wears hoop earrings.
# You get hubby/better half to wear a silver/steel ID bracelet like Gibbs'
# You start wearing a silver/steel ID bracelet like Gibbs'
# Your whole family can quote NCIS even though they've never seen it.
# You know everything there is to know about all the characters - permanent and occasional
# When your teacher/boss/parent tells you to do some small job or chore, you say "Ya know, most agencies have people to do these things."
# You create a Sims family of the NCIS cast
# You think goth fashion is the most chic
# You invent a role game of the series
# You use this site banner for your own website/letter headings, etc.
# You start Googling Ducky's stories to check for accuracy.
# You spend a whole week reminding everyone you know exactly how long it is until NCIS is on next.
# You think April 8, 2008 should be a holiday. (First new episode after the strike!! Yay!)
# When you get smacked on the back of your head, and your first words are "Thank You Boss!"
# You have watched the Cast Interrogation videos ten dozen times already since they came out Tuesday 8th
# You've learned their answers to those questions off pat
# You sign up with all the online NCIS sites
# You can't stop posting on the NCIS Wiki.
# You dream about NCIS
# You wear out your DVD and the discs, from re-running marathons
# You read all these statements and answered at least one with "positive".
# You've willingly joined NCIS Addicts Anonymous despite knowing there's no way out and the addiction only gets stronger
# Your German Shepherd is no longer called Rex but Jethro
# And if you have a female German Shepherd you will call her Jenny to keep it all in the family :-)
# You start yelling at people who annoy you "Bad McGee!"
# You take your phone off the hook/switch your mobile to silent mode when watching an episode
# Family and friends know they must not call by phone/in person while you're watching an episode unless it's a question of life and death, and even then ....
# You become obsessed with what the scriptwriters have in store for the cast
# You draw comics of NCIS.
# You write 'I Love NCIS' on any paper surface you can find.
# Your friend can't stop talking about their crush and you can't stop talking about NCIS.
# You day/night dream NCIS
# You can recognise the signature tune on the first bar
# Your mobile 'music' has Gibbs' voice, or
# Your mobile sms 'music' is Tony saying 'on it boss'
# You organize your social life/holidays around the episode programming
# NCIS addiction is your religion
# When where ever you go you swear you saw one of the team
# You're convinced they're one of the family
# Any medical problem requires a second opinion from Ducky
# If you have a car accident or industrial accident you require Abby to do the loss adjustment/forensics before you're fully satisfied
# All your family pets are named after the cast members
# You learn the NCIS theme on the piano and/or other instruments and play it all the time
# You think your other half looks handsome in a Hawaiian shirt
# You think Hawaiian shirts are chic male fashion
# You can dance to theme song of NCIS and sit down the second it ends
# You always know the exact amount of time until the next episode
# You can't sleep thinking about who will die on the season finale
# You spend class time/work time/time before you go to sleep/time you take to shampoo your hair dreaming up scenarios for the next episode/your fan fiction. (i know i do)
# You join all the internet forums extant on the series
# You spend your spare time reviewing/adding/editing the contents on this Wiki
# You spend the rest of the time thinking about how to improve this Wiki
# When you join the NCIS Wiki
# When you sign up on this addiction page - there's no way out
# You become a mainline addict when all the walls of your abode are covered floor to ceiling with photos, etc., of NCIS
# You drink Starbuck coffee, even if you don't like it (and you drink it black and sugarless)
# You think of ways to move this site up in the Wiki ranking
# You imitate Gibbs' saying of 'Today -insert name here- with your friends and family when they're taking a long time in doing stuff(me and my dad do it all the time)
# You name your computer McGee (i did it xD)
# Your NCIS season cd sometimes gets all hinky because you watch the season over and over again (guilty!)
# You make a NCIS poster and put it in your bedroom wall or consider looking at stores for a NCIS poster (I currently don't have one... but I will. :D)
# You spend hours on the internet just to find a tune with the song Tony sang in the episode 'Driven' (the one that starts with 'in my perspective...' and so on... the part when Tony went undercover near the restaurant that The Frog's people ate)
# You drink stuff that makes you hyper (guilty... xD)
# You cut your hair so you can look like Abby/any character you like to imitate
# Your family sometimes calls you 'Ziva'
# You act like your fave character (guilty!)
# You ask your classmates/friends/coworkers if they know NCIS
# Your computer is loaded with mostly NCIS pics
# You use terms from the show (for example, me and my family call a flash drive 'doodahs')
# You wish you had the NCIS cap/McGee's typewriter/Abby's farting hippo/Ziva's skills/Gibb's boat/DiNozzo's highly expensive shoes (yeah... sometimes. :D)
# You do everything humanly and non-humanly possible to push this Wiki up in the Wiki ratings You trust your gut, even when everything else goes against it.
# You trust your gut, more than facts or figures.
# You use 'hinky' to describe many things, even when people ask you to repeat what you say cause it sounds like something else.
# You cry when you don't hear Mark Harmon say " STAY TUNED FOR SCENES FROM OUR NEXT EPISODE"

omg my i said yes to so much wow especially the headslapping. when my sister really irratates me i slap her on the back of her head and i get in trouble for its so hard to control the impulse i also do it to my friends. they call me a mix of jethro and dinozzo. and the last one You cry when you don't hear Mark Harmon say " STAY TUNED FOR SCENES FROM OUR NEXT EPISODE" that is so true and just last nite i dreamed about dinozzo and gibbs and ziva and mcgee. and i can name any episode just by seeing 5 seconds of the episode

wow nice job i was almost literally rotflol! i answered yes to all but like 7 of them. im mostly like ziva. im a bit less violent but everything else we're soooo similar its scary! i looove this! i never knew it was mark harmon who said stay tuned, i told my mom this was educational.

Haha wow I answered yes to wayy over half of those. Based on the ones I said yes to I am a lot like Abby. I especially partake in headslapping, talking to technology, playing the theme song on the piano and I glared at someone today when they bugged me...they stopped. :D

HOLY CRAP THIS LIST IS MY LIFE.
i thought i was the only one who did this stuff... YOU JUST MADE MY DAY. no, my life!
THANK YOU!.
note- my favorite hat is a little orange wool cap. it was my grandpa's, and my whole family now calls it the ziva hat. i cry almost every time i put it on because i feel so bad for ziva. :(
BUT I LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE NCIS....I'm pretty much in love with Michael Weatherly's charecter Tony.....sooo gorgeous!!!!! Love how he quotes movies!!! Awesome list, and I said yes to a bunch of them!!! As Gibbs would say "Thats a good job"!!!!

OMG THIS LIST IS LIKE MY LIFE I CANT BELIEVE HOW MUCH THIS LIST IS EXACTLY LIKE ME I NOW WEAR BLACK, SLAP PEOPLE ON THEBACK OF THE HEAD, AND SAY ALL THE CATCH FRASES AND CALL PEOPLE DIRECTOR FOR THE POPULARS AND MCGEE FOR THE NERDS AND DINOZZOS FOR THE HOT GUYS

i can't believe I just now looked at this. I pretty much answered yes to all of them I even answered yes to looking around for Mcgee to fix my computer because it malfuntioned and when I realized he wasn't around I told myself where is McGee when you really need him. It was so funny I wuz almost scared out of my mind. i don't even know if in this case it should be a good thing or a bad thing.

WOW!!! I'm a bigger fan than I thought. I only started watching the show in August of this year and I'm totally addicted. I watched from season 3 and I'm on season 7 now. Afuuny thing happened. Four days ago I watched the episode where Ziva's apartment got blown up and McGee made a joke something like "a new meaning of fried hard drives" when he discovered a charred laptop in her home. The very next day my hard drive got fried!! Coincidence? Nope but we do believe in bad luck!!!! :D :(