The Wisdom of @shitmydadsays

Details are sparse: Justin is 28. He lives with his curmudgeonly 73 year-old dad. "He is awesome." The dad's wisdom is then entered into Twitter @shitmydadsays. Examples include:

Nutrition advice: "I didn't live to be 73 years old so I could eat kale. Don't fix me your breakfast and pretend you're fixing mine."Cooking advice: "Don't touch the bacon, it's not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i'll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing."And an appreciation for Mrs. Dash: "Love this Mrs. Dash. The bitch can make spices... Jesus, Joni (my mom) it's a joke. I was making a joke! Mrs. Dash isn't even real dammit!"

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