Life Lessons We Never Learned In School: How to Peel a Mango

Life Lessons We Never Learned In School: How to Peel a Mango

Latino blood runs a juicy, vibrant mango orange. All I know, is that everyone and their mother had at least one to twelve mango trees in their backyards in Miami. You couldn’t eat them fast enough or find a mercado that wanted to buy them from you. Latinos get creative, though, so, yes, we had mango upside down cake, mango pie, and too many mango smoothies.

Even though we had an abundance of mangos, we’re Latino and wasting food is a cardinal sin. Every non-Latino friend thinks we’re crazy, but we’re putting it in writing. This is how you peel a mango.

The strategy depends on the mango.

Here in Los Angeles, the “Champagne” mango, or more lovingly referred to as the Mexican Mango, is King. They’re more local, ripe and tasty than any other mango in this part of the country.

First, peel from the opposite end of the belly button.

I know you know what I mean. The belly button is the spot where the stem used to be. Flip it over and don’t you dare pick up a knife. You’re peeling the mango with your hands.

Then, peel all the skin off like a banana.

Some folks like to peel the skin nearly to the bottom and eat it like a banana, holding the base of the mango with the skin on it. Maybe it’s a little less messy but not nearly as fun.

This small extra step is for the perfectionists:

Credit: Saya Jujur / Youtube

We all know that peeling like a monkey without a tool is more fun, but the skin isn’t going to peel all the way down to the bottom every time. Maybe this way is more satisfying for the people who like the videos of flubber being cut up a hundred different ways.

Regardless, you’ll end up with a naked, intact, juicy mango.

We’re not slicing and dicing and eating with a fork. That’s wasteful.

We’re biting into the fruit of the gods with our god given teeth.

Eating cubes of mango is the most unnatural, unsatisfying task after enjoying this spiritual experience. Latinos know.

For reference, we only do this around the inner circle.

It’s messy AF, and if you don’t need a shower by the end of your mango, you’re not doing it right. It’s carnal and it’s pure.

Then, you suck off the rest of the mango off that seed.

The degree to which there is still mango left on the seed is the ultimate judgement by your tías. You’re an ingrate if you leave any bit of morsel on the seed, and you’re given a sloppy slap on the back if you eat till it tastes bitter.

For the Miami Mango, it’s custom to absolutely not peel the mango.

@Boeknowzz / Twitter

First, you slice the mango twice alongside each face of the seed. You’ll be left with two halves and the seed. Then, you hold the halves like the bowl of fruit that it is and bite into it, making sure to not bite all the way through the skin. You’re basically scraping the mango out with your teeth. Every now and then you use your teeth like scissors to bite away the skin and make room to properly enjoy your mango.

Some folks like to cut cubes into the halves of the mango and then turn it inside out.

@SRKsMohini_ / Twitter

Admittedly, it does make the teeth-scraping process easier and less messy. We’re offended if you eat it with a fork though.

Other folks just slice the mango halves like apple slices.

@Ashkhan0345 / Twitter

That’s the best of both worlds. The corners of your mouth don’t get roughed up from a huge mango half rubbing against it and you get the whole juicy experience.

Regardless, this is how we eat our mangos. Punto.

@HII_NAL / Twitter

Only three mangos were harmed during the creation of this culture-affirming post. We’re wide-eyed and sloppy and unapologetic about it.

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Cinco Cosas That Your Mom Has Pretty Much Always Told You To Do

Cinco Cosas That Your Mom Has Pretty Much Always Told You To Do

No matter how much we want to fight it, our moms and grandmothers know what’s up. Sure, you might not need a sueter (sweater) when it’s 100 degrees outside, but there’s always some truth to everything our mommas tell us. When it comes to our dreams, you can always count on your momma to boost your spirits and confidence when you need it most. Here are 5 positive switches you can do in your life rn that your mom has pretty much always told you to do. And just like your mom’s positive advice is essential to your success, Boost Mobile can be a valuable tool to help you get where you need to be.

1. Love yourself as much as your ‘amá loves you

They say a mother’s love is unconditional, so why wouldn’t you love yourself just as much? I mean, duhhhh you’re badassssss! Loving yourself is probably the most important change you can make because when you accept and embrace your unique self, everything starts falling into place. Plus, believing in yourself will really help you overcome any challenges and setbacks you may experience when following your dreams. Self confidence is EVERYTHING, don’t take it lightly.

You want to be a latino-snacks blogger, or make norteñas about your love of tacos? Go for it! Don’t let the jealousy, envy, and hate from all those salty people hold you back. Who cares what your tía chismosa says or thinks about your dream, just spray some hater repellent and, like your mom always says, “que te valga madre” (don’t give a damn), and focus on doing you. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life!

3. Drink more agua, come más…saludable (eat healthier), and muévelo

But really, don’t skip this one! When your mom asks you, “ya comiste,” it’s because she knoooows how important it is to take care of your body. There are soooo many reasons why a healthy diet and physical activity will help you live your best self. For one, it makes your body feel great (and sexy too), but it also teaches you discipline and mental stamina—all of which are qualities you need to achieve your dreams. We’re not saying you should become vegan or bench press 300 pounds, start small—like cutting back on caffeine, reaching for water instead of a diet soda, and getting some extra steps in by parking far. What’s important is for you to do what works best for you, and if you need a little reminder to drink more water, eat healthier, and/or track your physical activity there are plenty of apps that do just that. Check them out!

4. Never stop learning

Always strive to be the best. No matter what you do, work hard to be el más chingon (the best). And in order to do that, you gotta keep learning; read more books, learn from your mistakes and failures, and most importantly, sigue pa’lante (keep moving forward)!

5. ¡Levantate! (Get up!)

You can start reprogramming your body little by little by setting your alarm 15 minutes earlier than the ushe. Gradually, you can trick your body to wake up an hour earlier which will give you time to exercise, meditate, eat a healthy breakfast, plan out your day, etc. Don’t underestimate the benefits, you can really get a lot done in the morning! Keeping track of how you spend your time every day can be the key to achieving your dreams, and obvs, there are plenty of time tracking apps to help you stay focused and on track!

Make these changes in your life and always push yourself to be better. Live your truth proudly and follow your dreams with confidence! And NEVER forget…

Valderrama teamed up with the National Mango Board on Valentine’s Day to show people how to “undress a mango.” You can finally learn how to cut a mango like a pro.

“This Valentine’s Day I’m going to get flirty and really strip down and undress …. this mango (what were you thinking about?! Wow! Relax),” Valderrama writes. “Do you know that nearly half of American’s don’t know how to cut a mango? C’mon it’s a mango, don’t be that person at a mango party not knowing how to dance.. hahah Join me in undressing … this mango! (Again! I’m talking about the Mango!) #UndressAMango @mangoboard partner (and a lover of mangos, since I was 4 years old back in Venezuela!)”

¿Listo?

1. On a cutting board, position the mango so the stem is on top.

CREDIT: The National Mango Board

Slice each side just past the seed.

2. Cut vertically 1/4 inch away from the midline of the mango.

CREDIT: The National Mango Board

Make the same cut on the other side.

3. Lastly, cut the flesh in a grid like pattern without going through the skin