Karen’s Krap

Okay, admit it. You sung that! HAHA! But seriously, I do love the cheesy Hallmark holiday movies so much! I’ll watch them…and before I know it, 84 years have gone by! Anyway, we’re not the only ones addicted to these feel good movies! Three guys have created a podcast with their own reviews! Which means, they’re just like us and don’t move from the sofa for hours. One of them adores the movies, one is neutral and one totally despises them. When the three come together, hilarity ensues. Honestly, I may now become more addicted to the reviews than the movies!

First, I would like to go on record to say that I would never do this. Besides looking totally unnatural, I wouldn’t want a lip malfunction while eating out at a fancy restaurant. Or ANYWHERE, for that matter.

Women are applying glue between their nose and upper lip as an alternative to lip fillers. It involves applying strong adhesive like lash glue or even SUPERGLUE (what???), right above the top lip. Then you fold your lip up and stick it to the glue, creating an illusion of a fuller top lip. The trend originated on video sharing app TikTok before making its rounds on Twitter.

Gahhhhhhhhhhhh, nothing takes the fun out of a good fish story than SCIENCE! I mean, so what if it’s a big slimy eel viewed through beer goggles! This is like trying to tell a toddler that there’s no Santa. ITS WRONG! Okay? So just shut up. Thanks. – KW

The most famous photo of the Loch Ness monster has long been discredited as a hoax, but scientists have come up with a new explanation for other sightings of the elusive beast — it could be just a giant eel. https://t.co/PV5xpLIZFgpic.twitter.com/aSJfJ8Spqn

A recent poll looked at how good we are at “adulting.” It listed a bunch of things we SHOULD know how to do as a grown-up, and asked readers whether or not they can do them. I mean, there are a few things I could probably be a LOT better at. I’ve lamented for months about my parallel parking skills, so I’m not going to bore you with that. I can change a flat tire, but I’d prefer not to, ya know? So…some of the things on the list:

Swallow a pill easily? – check.

Regularly have the oil changed in the car? – YEP!

Neatly wrap a gift? – Sure! If you don’t mind waiting forever for it!

Kill a spider without screaming – You GOTTA be kidding me! But 59 percent say yeah. Maybe those folks should start their own emergency spider killing business. We call ’em…and for a hundred bucks, they come over our house and get rid of it. I’m not talking about calling an exterminator. I mean, someone who specializes in exterminating ONE spider. Someone who is on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days and even on leap year who will drop everything and make a house call! Like…right now. Even if it’s two in the morning. Okay…wishful thinking.

FINALLY, there’s this:

Almost 70 percent of those people surveyed said they could fold a fitted sheet. Ugh. I’ve watched those how-to YouTube videos over and over and mine STILL don’t look that pretty. Maybe over half of those people surveyed were LYING? I don’t know. Is rolling it up and shoving it in the linen closet still considered “folding”? If it is, I’m adulting like a boss. – KW

OMG! Help! Both of my ears are itching just thinking about this! Woman went to the doctor thinking she had water in her ear…and WHAAAAT?! Brown.freaking.recluse.SPIDER! 😱😱😱 She’s very fortunate that it didn’t bite her! Question is, how and when did it get in there? – KW

I just saw this story this morning…and already I wanna leave the studio and go to the store and stock up on these little gems! Now, I’m not a total pumpkin spice geek and seriously, I’ve never tried these. But the thought of how delicious Hostess Cupcakes are anyway, I have complete faith that these are going to be fabulous! I’ll report back to you soon. In the meantime, go get yours…before I buy them all. Limited supply, ya know! Everyone for themselves! HAHA! – KW

As expected, within SECONDS after making the announcement, all hell broke loose on the interwebs.

Disney wants to reboot #HomeAlone Nobody wants this. Want proof? There are 4 sequels to Home Alone that nobody cares about.The first movie was perfect. No reboot or sequel will ever recapture the magic that was the orginal. pic.twitter.com/tvJMTiUJSl

It’s been years since I had a nice ice cream sandwich. I could almost taste one when I read about the holiday on social media. But nearly 10 seconds later, my excitement about my forthcoming treat came to a screeching halt. EWWWW!

So, earlier this week, French’s created a mustard ice cream for National Mustard Day (August 3rd), but not to be upstaged by some condiment company, Oscar Meyer fired back. Ice Dog Sandwiches. Yeah, hot dog infused ice cream with CANDIED HOT DOGS, my hand to god! Here. Read for yourself.

Y’all! I travel on a budget. Yep. I love to find those less than 500 dollar round trip international flights and take them as often as I can. To me, it’s about the destination. And basically, I’d rather have MORE trips for less money and suck it up on the plane flight. Yeah, those budget seats can be uncomfortable…and seem to be getting more and more cramped. Ain’t even gonna lie. But, I do get up and stretch my legs often and sometimes, I do try for the direct flight…if it’s within the budget.

Here’s a photo that’s going viral right now. A woman sleeping on the floor of a plane. I get it, sister. I’ve been tempted to do it myself, however, I’m not about the gross stuff that was probably on that floor previously…like people’s stinky bare feet. Besides, wouldn’t it be all noisy down there? Yes, I entertained the thought…once, but no…would never do it. I just keep my mind focused on the destination of my trip and meditate on that. Maybe whine a little bit under my breath.

But I’m not gonna begrudge her for doing this. I just hope she showers and scrubs with antibacterial soap at least ten times when she gets to her destination. So, what do YOU say? Would YOU get all comfy and take a nap on the floor of a plane? Most of Twitter says, AWWW HAIL NO! That’s disgusting! – KW

I had the chance to chat with Morgan Wallen today leading up to the big show with Florida Georgia Line.

We chatted about his dating life, what inspired his mullet and hit song “Whiskey Glasses.”

Listen:

Congratulations!!!

Thomas Rhett is expecting his 3rd child with wife Lauren!

They shared the happy news today and the gender reveal! It’s a girl!

Excited to share that I will now be paying for 3 weddings😂 I feel so blessed to say that our third child is on the way and it’s a girl!! I love you so much @laur_akins. WG and AJ, y’all are gonna be the best big sisters! Bring on the crazy pic.twitter.com/f1Im0RAySO

Lauren updated fans as well with a video of the gender reveal saying:

We decided we didn’t have enough princess dresses around the house so we’re adding another Akins baby girl to the family early next year 💕🎀😭💗💗💗 despite Thomas Rhett’s initial shock (swipe to see video 😂) we are absolutely over the moon for our baby girl! Our girls cannot wait to meet their little sister 💕💕 Willa Gray prays for her every night (heart in a puddle every time😭😭) & she and Ada James love to touch my belly and talk to her😭😭💗💗💗-especially bc I’ve been showing since I was SEVEN weeks (🤪). So it feels like we have been hiding this secret for an ETERNITY. And I’d like to apologize to everyone I’ve canceled on, said no to or just been MIA, but for a second there I wasn’t sure if I was pregnant or just puked for a living🤢. But she’s soooo worth it💕💗💕💗💕 We are SO excited! & if you need TR you can find him in the camping section at REI buying dude things…….jk, he’s excited too

I know some people are all about Crocs. Mainly, for their comfort. Even Luke Combs loves crocs and says he wears them around the house. Without socks, of course, because that would be weird. Personally, I do not like them. I think they’re ugly and honestly, I don’t think they’re very comfortable. Additionally, I don’t like the weird squeaking noise they make when people who wear them walk on floors without carpet. Like…fingernails on a chalkboard!

I don’t know about anybody else, but I think Jar Jar Binks from Star Wars Phantom Menace is kind of cute. Don’t @ me. Yes, annoying, but cute. But an astounding number of Star Wars fans believe Jar Jar is the worst character to ever hit the franchise. (The Ewoks are grateful)

Which is why it astounded me to see that Jar Jar was TRENDING on Twitter today! Why was Jar Jar trending some 20 years after the movie was released? Well, it looks like Jar Jar is trending because….the internet keeps asking WHY Jar Jar is trending. 😂😂😂

Sometimes you only get one shot. That’s it. One chance to make a fabulous impression in those social media photos. Nope…not 144 selfies and that you can pick and choose. Just one. Like that coveted meet and greet pic that you’ve been thinking about all day. You’ve practiced the pose, you know which side is your best side, you’ve made a quick trip to the ladies room to touch up the makeup. You’re ready!

But sometimes your best efforts still end up….

HYSTERICAL!

And that’s why I still consider this one POST-WORTHY!

First, there’s Jay DeMarcus’ profile shadowing my face. Then, my arms firmly squished by my side because it was 97.3 degrees and my pits showed every bit of it. (Thanks for pointing that out, Carly!) Finally, the poor guy in the corner trying so hard not to be in the pic…just made this my FAVORITE meet & greet photo EVER! 😂 – KW

My kids have teased me for years about killing houseplants. Not necessarily so. I kept one alive longer than a year once and clearly that one slipped their minds. One day after the furniture was rearranged, the plant got hidden, sort of. Actually, it was moved out of the way and never put back in it’s sunny spot. Out of sight, out of mind. A month later, it was crunchy and sad. I bought plastic plants from then on. The kids never let me live it down.

Fast forward to Summer of 2017. A friend gifted me with a lovely plant. It’s STILL alive today. No kidding. My child thought it was plastic and called me out on social media. I drove all the way from Virginia Beach to Newport News with that plant so she could see for herself. She apologized. Sort of. She thinks it’s a replacement plant.

That little plant inspired me. I decided to buy more plants for my home. Some indoor, some outdoor. Last winter, an outdoor plant that was gifted to me from my sister-in-law withered up and died, despite all of my efforts to resuscitate it. She said that perhaps I should have brought it indoors. I felt shame…and guilt. Sort of. Embarrassment, more like. I would never tell the children this.

Anyway, since it was winter and all, I didn’t do much with my balcony plant. I didn’t throw out the pot. I figured I’d just wait until it got warmer and plant something else.

A few weeks ago, something started sprouting in that pot. I left it alone, still planning to plant something new.

Everyday, it grew faster and faster. I didn’t even water it. Just let Mother Nature do her thing. And now…here it is. Bigger and better than it was before.

I was so excited. Until I found out that banana tree plants never go away. Ever. They just take a winter vacation. And you really don’t have to do anything.

I think I need more banana trees. I’ve got a point to prove to the kiddos. – KW

I’d say about 90 percent of the time, I eat healthy. And then I do treat myself. Lately, I’ve added more veggies to my diet and have no problem with cauliflower showing up as an alternative to potatoes and wheat flour.

I did a little grocery shopping yesterday and came across something new. Cauliflower snack crackers. Now, I’ve had cauliflower mashed like potatoes, cauliflower rice and even cauliflower crust pizza and absolutely love them, so…was pretty excited about grabbing a couple of boxes of these.

I shared my find with my friends on FB, but I hadn’t tried them at the time because I was still full from lunch. My friends asked for a review and nutrition content. Not a problem!

Later that day, I tried them. I tried the cheesy ones first because I am crazy about Cheez-Its and really had high hopes there. I was disappointed. I mean, they were okay but not something I would buy again. It might have been better loaded down with some hummus or something, but alone, I wasn’t impressed.

The Sea Salt ones, however, were pretty good! They didn’t even need to be doused in ranch!

Now, I’m not saying the cheesy ones were bad…YOU might like them, so if you’re on the cauliflower bandwagon like me, go for it. But me? I’ll stick with Cheez-Its on my cheat days.

In conclusion, I’m so glad the whole kale thing is almost over. Eww. Long live cauliflower! I have no problem trying the new stuff and sharing my thoughts with you….unless, someone makes a dessert out of cauliflower, I’m good! – KW

Back in the day, people popped rubber bands on their wrists as a diversion from bad habits, but now for about a hundred and fifty bucks more, you can grab this classy little wearable device from Amazon that will zap you when you indulge in overeating, smoking or any other habit you wanna see go bye-bye. Some people are swearing by it. Oh yeah, you can use it to stop swearing too. Sooooo…would YOU try it? – KW

It's called the Pavlok wristband. The bracelet sends an electric shock to your body every time you find yourself falling victim to bad habits – like biting your nails, smoking, oversleeping, or eating too much fast food. https://t.co/CcYYEfbLmf

Don’t think I’m ever gonna be onboard with this trend. I mean, it hurts to look at it! Apparently, the 2019 summer trend is Sunburn Tattoos. All you do is put a stencil of the design you want on your skin, hang out in the sun for awhile and voila! A temporary tattoo.

Yeah, I admit it. Sometimes I go to bed with my makeup on. While Dolly and Kim Kardashian have completely legit reasons why they sleep in full face makeup, I don’t. Sometimes I just get plain lazy. But I always wash my face and moisturize first thing in the morning. I’m not a total beauty rule breaker! 😉 How about you? – KW

Twitter is being turned upside down again. This time by a tiny little freckle in the middle of the left wrist. Apparently, it’s a girl thing and now thousands of women have shared pics of their freckles.

When I first heard about this “silent gif” awhile ago, I didn’t play. Nope. When this thing resurfaced a few days ago, I was curious. Seventy percent of people claim to “hear” it. I laughed. Really? Lemme try.

Even a certain celebrity who starred in a highly rated comedy with a reputation of having one of the worst series finales ever weighed in on the debate.

Dear #GOT company, I know a little something about finales and disappointed fans. My advice: live in joy that you are part of something that moves people so. You were all magnificent. My family and I loved it all. Thanks.

To be clear, I adored the Seinfeld finale. I just keep getting crap about it from fans. I loved that Jerry/Larry found an organic way to bring back all the amazing guests that enriched our show. It was an amazing week together filming it.

I’m just sitting here taking in the pleasant aroma of someone heating a blueberry muffin in the break room. I wish whoever it was had brought enough for everyone. But for now, I’ll just sit here and daydream about going to a bakery on the way home from the office.

But…there was that one time when someone…who was trying to eat healthy…heated a small piece of salmon for lunch. Let me tell you, it took several hours for that odor to clear. I’m not going to mention who did that…okay, fine. IT WAS ME. Several years ago. I learned my lesson that any kind of fish is only meant to be enjoyed at home or in a restaurant. People looked at me funny. One even made a nice long rant on social media. So now, any time anyone heats something pungent…or burns popcorn…I’m the one they blame. Hey! It was ONE TIME! Get over it already!

Anyway, the reason I’m bringing this up is simply this. Sometimes, you have to be mindful of what you bring in your lunch bag. Your co-workers may not be as excited about it as you are. – KW

Siiiiiigh. I promised myself that I would not get sucked into the internet abyss again after the great viral dress debate of 2015. Yet, here I am…focusing my eyes on a pic of somebody’s sneaker and trying to see what the fuss is about. We’ve had this argument about this SAME shoe in 2017…and now it’s back for round 2! Why????? Let’s settle this.

Aaaaaand…I saw both. Yep. At first, I saw them as teal. And then I saw them as pink.

Apparently, if we’re right brain dominant, we will see pink. If we are left brain dominant, we will see teal.

Now I’m scaring myself.

The shoe is PINK, btw. Or…as the description states, Mahogany Rose. Same thing.

The Avengers cast and crew were told NO PHOTOS OR VIDEOS…NO CELL PHONES during filming. But that did not stop Chris Pratt from capturing a room full of greatness in one video. So…what they gonna do about it? Fire him? HAHA! – KW

Fortunately, I didn’t fall upon any spoilers for Endgame on the web, but they’re out there. And I don’t wanna know. But…totally okay with getting some strong reactions to the last installment. I mean, I need to know when to take a potty break in that three hour period and judging by this, ya just can’t! You won’t even want to!
Anyway, I won’t be drinking any soda, that’s for sure. 😉 – KW

Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Tiffani Theissen, Elizabeth Berkley and Mario Lopez along with their spouses enjoyed dinner together recently with the caption, “Friends Forever.” (Any SBTB fan will get the reference. 😉 ) Anyway, I don’t know about you, but it took me a second to recognize Zack Morris! – KW

Are you one of those people who says, “let’s do lunch sometime…my treat” and somehow, “sometime” never happens? HAHA. Well, I’m one of those people who is still waiting for “sometime”, so I thought the best way to make “sometime” happen a lot sooner is to call out these people. I do this in fun, of course, because I know they’ll eventually pay up. But, I’m a little hungry…ummm…well…rather HANGRY, hence, this blog post.

Let’s start with this guy. Our afternoon extraordinaire JAS. This guy owes me like…I dunno…14 lunches? I’m not sure why, but he said “lunch” and I’m holding him to all of them.

Next…is this poor guy. Our fantastic weekend dude Big Red. I just love him. And somehow he got roped into treating me to one of those lunches that JAS owes me. He just kind of fell into it by accident. Hey Big Red: As my grandma used to say, “You are known by the company you keep.” Sorry, dude. At least it’s only one meal.

And finally…this guy. My friend of many years…the wonderful and talented Traffic Wizard, Wynn Evers! He promised me some expensive and really bad for you food. Like a nice steak. It’s been like 4 months now. That would really hit the spot right now, Wynn.

So, there ya go. Lunch shaming at it’s best. Before I close, I would just like to add that any lunches promised by Stephanie Taylor are forgiven. I still remember those mashed potato cookies she made for April Fool’s Day.

Heinz has introduced Cadbury Creme Egg Mayo! No, we can’t get it here in the US…yet. It’s being test marketed in breweries in London. I guess they’re banking on folks drinking enough beer to try it.

Okay, c’mon Heinz! Some mashups just shouldn’t happen. 😂😂😂

We weren’t kidding, Heinz Creme Egg Mayo is a thing! Who wants to try it?🙌 OF COURSE YOU DO! Come and see us at Ely’s Yard, Truman Brewery in London from 11th-13th April for free samples of this crazy combo. Only until stocks last! pic.twitter.com/3ZVehv0LJb