This is one of the first things I ask clients of my Portland marriage counseling practice because I want to understand where they are coming from and what they already know. Far too often, the answer to my question is no. Usually followed by something like, “Well, we didn’t have problems before. Why would we need help?”

But that’s exactly why everyone should head to a couples retreat early on in their relationship – because they can show you how to listen to each other and resolve problems when they inevitably do pop up. And the perfect time for a couple to go on this journey is when you are preparing for your wedding or just after you’ve gotten married, because that’s when you’ll be at your most receptive.

Part of the reason that relationship issues become, well, issues is because they are problems that we’ve been dealing with for an extended period of time. Early on in a relationship, it’s far easier to see the good and be forgiving of the bad, but over time, things tend to weigh on us. She nags and refuses to let go of her anger. He’s defensive and forgetful and bad at listening.

These are habits that can be difficult to break, and this is especially true if we’ve been essentially getting away with them around each other for years because the relationship has been going relatively well. We become accustomed to interacting with our partners in a particular way and have to “unlearn” this behavior.

Start Off Right from the Beginning with a Couples Retreat

The best thing about going to a retreat at the beginning of your relationship is that the main point is spending time together learning about and appreciating each other. That’s exactly what most newlyweds want to do anyway! Having this experience at a retreat just makes it a bit more formal and in-depth by showing couples methods that allow them to continually focus on the relationship.

Naturally, couples retreats can help you to resolve many problems no matter what stage of your relationship you’re at, but it’s a lot easier if you start off already understanding the best way to interact with each other and diffuse situations. That’s what going on a retreat right after marriage gives you – a foundation of understanding to prevent problems. If you’re interested in trying a couples retreat, contact Portland marriage counseling today.