lifes the same, your shakin like tremolo, lifes the same, its all inside you….. hey, wait a minute, whats that about my shoes??? yo, i like my shoes, especially my 3 inch spiked sandals. thems some smokin shoes! damn near all my shoes are 3 inch spikes which, when i think about it is kind of funny cause im six foot tall. for years i wore nothing but flats, until i met my beloved and he LOVES my height so it stands to reason that he loves it when i put my knock me down and fuck me heels on <seg>. but in thinkin about it, not all my shoes are spikes, my riding boots arent (and i have to hide them from the heinous hound, who ate the heels off them once upon a time) and my tye dye sneaks are, naturally, not heels lol. it does stand to reason you know…

but yes, you read right, we moved! YIPPEE!! (make sure you update your records/ignorant blog suzanne, so i can add that to my federal stalking/harassment complaint, and to your parents…). it was time. we didn’t need all that room with the gruesome twosome grown and off to college. but oh the moving woes. oh the woes. boxing everything in the house, deciding what to keep and what to get rid of. finding boxes. bubble wrap for my lead crystal that was my moms and the Wedgwood china that was my dads and the assorted fine crystal/china i have. boxes. did i mention that? oh dear lord the pit of despair – the bog of eternal stench. sigh. the bubble wrap. fighting with my boss for the boxes as he was moving as well! (i would sneak boxes out when he wasn’t looking… the never ending decisions of do we want this? holy shit my beloved is listening to malt shop tunes. kill.me.now. it truly amazed me the amount of crap you accumulate in all those years of living there. i had already gone thru all the years of my kids school work and kept all the really righteous stuff they both had brought home so that was something not necessary to do. that box was clearly labeled KEEP!!!

the decision to move wasn’t solely based on the gruesome twosome’s flying away from home. we really didn’t need all that space, its true, but we were really sick and tired of living in the woods and being terrified of the next limb that was going to come down thru the roof. so far, we had 2 large limbs come thru the roof and one almost killed my beloved and that was during hurricane irene (suzanne, when you claim on delphi that this happened to your boyfriend, make sure you get it right – seriously everyone, my stalker has a fantasy life based not only on my life but several others as well. apparently her life is meaningless (i was told THAT by an ex-husband of hers…). i had to work that day so i slalomed my way down 340 in sideways blown winds (man that was fun lol) and i have never seen so many dejected people outside of the neil young concert during the blizard of 83! i called my beloved to let him know im there safe so he doesn’t worry. i get a call a couple of hours later, he was just shy of out of his mind, he had gotten up when i called him and went to lay down on the couch. CRASH – a 15 foot limb came thru the roof about 6 inches from where he had been laying… suffice it to say i was outta there and on my way home.

but back to moving…. we looked and we looked and we blew the house down. no wait, thats a story for another day. but wherever we went, they had to take pets cause i wont live where my furry kids aren’t welcome. so we ended up just free searching, cause the online listings sucked. whats free searching you ask? its just looking wherever you happen to be driving at the time. kinda like they do on aw crap. i’ve forgotten the name of the show. um… the auction hunters? or the guys who just drive around looking for places to buy neat stuff cheap and then they resell it. love me that show. whatever the hell that show is called but its premise is what we did to find our place. we just looked at signs and called places. how can you go wrong? oh thats a helluva loaded question as you CAN go wrong, as we found out. this one place we looked at was so horrifically, disgustingly inconceivably wrong i still don’t know the place can be fit much less certified livable by the housing commission. my beloved and i we so skeeved by it that we went straight to the bar when we were out of there. i still shudder when i pass by it.

but we found this one place we really liked. it looked like it would be a nice intimate place for the two of us, and if they took pets, there would be plenty of space for them and it was location location location! i got the number as we drove by and called them up as we went movin right along down the road. sho nuff, the place would be available in a few months (we were ok with that) and would we like to take a tour? we definitely would love too, but most importantly, do they take dogs? indeed they did and we set up the appointment for the next day. we took the walk thru (and was amazed by the clutter of the current tenant – and i thought i was a slob – yikes!!!) set up our deposit and bided (boded?) our time. and started thinking about boxes… did i mention we needed boxes? boxes are good when you are moving.

now one of the funnier, well, not things about moving were the dogs. my poor things had some separation anxiety. ok, serious separation anxiety. they know when they see boxes, somebody is going away. the last time it was minime going off to college. so on that note, i would like to refer you to allie; from hyperbole and a half’s post dogs dont understand basic concepts like moving because they truly dont. while my heinous hounds arent quite as “special” as allies they did have quite the cow when they watched everything get boxed up all month. then when the time came and my beloved and i left to sign the papers, my poor babies just went apenuts. i was dropped back off at our place with the first load to start unpacking and to wait for the tv guy and i told my other half PLEASE bring the dogs over now, they need it. but did he? sigh. no. so the hounds were literally going out of their little minds every time he went back for another load and left them there. finally i had to put my foot down and told him BRING THE FUCKING DOGS WITH THE NEXT LOAD OR ELSE….. he brought the dogs with the next load. smart move. so we spent some time playing with the dogs (ie getting lots of loves) and getting them introduced to our new home and taking them out back to familiarize them with the new diggs. it took them a couple of days however to start to relax. well truly relax. i think the pez constipated himself and kilo got the runs. welcome to my hell. but they are adjusting well to the new run we have for them out back and the dogs on the other side of the fence. they’ve done the equivalent of sniffing each others butts through the fence with no aggressiveness at all, which made us very happy. ok made me happy.

so i think that will end moving in stereo’s chapter one (i decided i would break up my moving woe/adjustment) into two and quite possibly three posts cause im already at 1300 words lol. holy shit 1300+ words? damn it was a long move.

so my gentle readers, i will leave you with this, so i can go outside and smoke, that i will follow up in the next post… hope the vid comes thru…

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GNU Terry Pratchett

My favorite author. A man who was able to make me laugh literally out loud with tears running down my face.
Sir Terry had humor, irony, and DEATH down to a T. And speaking of DEATH, he was my favorite character, followed only by Binky, DEATHS horse and the DEATH of Rats.
There is supposed to be a plug-in for GNU TERRY PRATCHETT. I may not figure out how to do a plug-in, but i can pay tribute to one of the funniest, most wonderful author i've ever read. And i highly recommend you read Sir Terry's Discworld series. you will lose your mind from laughing so hard.
Terry - you will live on in the clacks. We will make sure of it!!