How I Met Your Mother, Who Also Had a Slit-Throat Tattoo

Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that series.

Arrested: 12/31Charged with: Petty theft, resisting officer without violence, trespassing after warning Unless you're a Bone Thug or one of the Seven Dwarfs, there's no reason why you should get "Lazy" inked on your face. Also, who would get a tattoo of their neck being slit?

Arrested: 12/30Charged with: Cocaine possession with intent to deliverLook at her neck. That's just magical.