Breadcrumb

A special little angel

The pain of losing a baby is a pain of no other. I will never be fit to express the pain that I felt throughout my whole body, the day I was told my baby had died.

Pregnancy is such a precious thing, we always think of the good but what about the bad? My first pregnancy was a very special one, I got a scan at 8 weeks 2 days and it was the most amazing thing I have ever experienced, from the midwife saying my baby was healthy and had a strong heart beat and never thinking that it was the last time I would hear it’s wee heart.

As time progressed, I started having really bad morning sickness, and the only thing I could keep down was ice lollies, I finally got tablets prescribed by a doctor in the GP out of hours in the hospital. They had worked, then when I was 11 weeks pregnant I had a sharp pain, I panicked so went to see my local doctor and he said everything was fine and that it was stress related.

I never got to feel my baby kick so I never knew if things were ok or not. On the 15/12/17 I went for my 12 week scan, I saw my wee baby and so beautiful it looked too but little did I know that the doctor was going to tell me that the heart was no longer beating. I had a missed miscarriage, I had no signs of anything except a sharp pain.

It was then explained to me that I had to go for a D&C which I was scared about. I was then admitted to the hospital on the 21st of December, I was due to go for surgery that day but then didn’t as the doctors wanted me to go through medical management as there were too many risks.

They changed their minds so much but then finally on the 24th December I got my D&C and that was the day my baby had left my belly.. my heart was broken, there was so many questions that I had asked that were left unanswered. My baby went away for testing so it was a long painful wait without knowing anything.

Then the day finally came that I got to bury my little sweetheart, on the 21/01/18 my baby Brooklyn was laid to rest. The pain that I and the father went through is something no parent should ever have to go through. So to our little angel, mum and dad love you so very much x