16 Classic Fall Dates, Best Vs. Worst Case Scenarios

Fall is here, and we’re thrilled. We’re snatching up all the cutest fall sweaters, we’ve been planning our Halloween costume for months, and we don’t need an excuse to indulge in pumpkin spice lattes.

We’re also pumped for fall date activities. No need to worry about your bikini body, or sweating under the summer sun, or falling for someone who’s only in town for a brief summer vacation. Autumn means apple picking and cuddling under cozy blankets and borrowing his Patagonia. Cuffing season is real, and it’s here, and we’re ready for it.

Unfortunately for all of us, dates don’t always go as planned. And as picture perfect as all these fall activities seem on paper, they don’t always quite pan out that well. Before you embark on an autumn adventure, prepare yourself for the worst case scenario. Hey, if you set your standards low, then your expectations can only be exceeded, right?

1. Going apple picking

Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer

Best Case: You’ll be in the middle of an idyllic, old school farm, surrounded by fragrant apple trees and baby goats. There will be freshly baked apple cider donuts and warm apple cider. You’ll hold hands as you stroll through the orchard with your sack full of fruit.

Worst Case: The baby goats will smell bad, and one will chew the hem of your chunky knit sweater. Half of the apples will already be rotten. You’ll burn your tongue on the much-too-hot apple cider, and even if you still want to make out with your date (after they jokingly threw an apple at you that actually really hurt), you won’t be able to enjoy it.

2. Catching a football game

NBC

Best Case: Team spirit is fun! Everyone loves a sporty chick! You’ll cheer on your date’s team like a number 1 fan, even though they picked this game and you don’t care about either team that's playing. You’ll drink beer and eat overpriced hot dogs and feel American af!

Worst Case: Football season gets real cold, real fast, and those metal stadium bleachers do not help; in fact, they probably make your ass feel 5 degrees colder. Someone near you will get way too upset by one of the refs' calls and cause a scene. Your date’s team will lose and they’ll be too disappointed to be social.

3. Tailgating

The WB

Best Case: Who needs to go to the game when you can have more fun in the parking lot?? You’ll hang with the gang, fire up the grill, and pretend like you’re in college again. The good ol’ days!

Worst Case: Someone will get too drunk — you, your date, or someone else in your tailgate group — and draw the attention of the rival team’s fans or the cops. You’ll run out of either buns or burgers before the game is over. And the jersey you borrowed to wear is not flattering.

4. Playing in the leaves

Disney

Best Case: Ideal Instagram scenario: pretty colors, falling leaves, your favorite booties. You can roll around on the ground and get a little handsier than you would without the cover of the leaves.

Worst Case: Your date isn’t great with timing, and you have to take 10 tries to get the right Boomerang, leaving you both annoyed. You find something gross (a half eaten candy bar, a condom wrapper, a dead bug) in the leaves right by your head. Your favorite booties get stained.

5. Going on a hayride

DreamWorks Studios

Best Case: Such a solid activity, reminiscent of childhood without being too cutesy. You guys can spike your cider with whiskey and get a warm buzz going as you roll along.

Worst Case: You spill your spiked cider on your jeans and get a glare from all the parents on your ride when the whiskey scent wafts across the wagon. Hay is really itchy.

6. Going through a corn maze

NBC

Best Case: You’ll tackle the maze together, problem-solving at every twist and turn. You’ll find a private corner to make out, and wrap up your romantic moment just in time, as a group of pre-teens rounds the bend. You’ll make it through the maze with energy to spare for a fun night out.

Worst Case: One of you will become a dictator, demanding to go your way. Your makeout session will be interrupted mid-tongue. You’ll get so lost that by the time you get out you just want to go straight home, alone.

7. Carving pumpkins

CBS

Best Case: Halloween tradition! Your date is surprisingly artistic with the knife and designs a beautiful Jack o’lantern. You’ll carve your initials into the backs of each other’s pumpkins.

Worst Case: Neither of you has any knife skills or artistic talent and your pumpkins are a crude mess. The gooey innards of the pumpkin have gotten all over your dress. After going through this process, you never want to drink a PSL again.

8. Making coordinating Halloween costumes

NBC

Best Case: Couples costume, such a romantic idea. You’ll be the talk of the Halloween party, and you’ll take the perfect Instagram photo together. All your friends will be impressed with how creative you are.

Worst Case: You dove into this whole couples thing too soon and you’re both feeling trapped. Your costume is a little too creative and you find yourself explaining it over and over again. Or, it’s a little too basic and another couple is wearing the exact same thing.

9. Visiting a haunted house

NBC

Best Case: You can pretend to be scared and hold hands with your date. Plus, the shared adrenaline rushes from all the surprises will bring you closer.

Worst Case: Haven’t you watched any of the videos of Ellen DeGeneres sending her employees to haunted houses?? That ish is SCARY! Forget about your date, you’re going to be rushing through that house as fast as you can.

10. Watching a scary movie

Paramount Pictures

Best Case: The perfect opportunity to cuddle: getting scared and burrowing your face in your date’s shoulder. And again with the adrenaline rush thing.

Worst Case: Even if you enjoy yourselves at the time, you’re going to have nightmares later. Is months of dreaming of Pennywise really worth it?? (And I mean the movie character, not the surprisingly hot actor who plays him in the recent remake.)

11. Going to the farmer’s market

NBC

Best Case: Fresh produce, pretty flowers, homemade bread, and a general vibe of good natured friendliness. Sure, it’s cliché, but who cares?

Worst Case: It is cliché. Neither you nor your date really wants to drop too much $$ on vegetables grown in some rando’s garden or a healing crystal from the tent at the end of the row, but you’re there, so you’ll feel obligated. What are you doing to do with that tub of mushrooms, anyway? You could have bought your lunch pre-made at a restaurant like everyone else.

12. Baking a pie

FOX

Best Case: What is it about fall that makes everyone want to bake pies? Whether you go for apple, cherry, or pumpkin, there’s something sexy about sharing a kitchen together and feeding each other bites of a slice off the same plate after it’s out of the oven.

Worst Case: You’ll be short one ingredient and by the time your date returns with it, you’re basically done preparing the rest of the pie, so you’re not quite dancing around the kitchen as you imagined. The crust will burn. It won’t taste as good as they kind from the bakery down the street.

13. Going camping

Nickelodeon

Best Case: So adventurous! Sharing a tent will be such a bonding experience. You can make s’mores on sticks and tell ghost stories by firelight.

Worst Case: Neither of you are sure how to erect the tent correctly. You forgot bug spray. It gets really cold at night. Romance goes out the window when you have to get up in the middle of the night and squat to pee beside the tent.

14. Going hiking

Touchstone Pictures

Best Case: Also adventurous! You’ll get to see new sights, work up a sweat together (hinting to future activities that also get the blood pumping…), and get a day’s workout in all at once. Connecting with nature is so deep.

Worst Case: One (or both) of you will fall, and not gracefully. You’ll run out of water on your hike back. Nature wasn’t enough to distract you from the lack of chemistry between the two of you.

15. Attending a fall festival

The CW

Best Case: Such wholesome fun! You can get your faces painted, eat caramel apples, and visit the petting zoo. Your date will suggest that you get a caricature done of the two of you, and you’ll do a new one every year for your anniversary.

Worst Case: Your date has an allergic reaction to the face paint and breaks out in hives. The caramel is stuck in your teeth the whole day so you’re afraid to let them make out with you later. The petting zoo is overrun with children. The caricature makes your forehead look five times its normal size.

16. Planning a Thanksgiving potluck

NBC

Best Case: You’ll gather all of your friends together in one place for an evening of giving thinks (and drinking wine). You’ll organize the potluck list so everyone brings a different dish. You’ll play the perfect hostess and your date will want to wife you up immediately.

Worst Case: People ignore your carefully planned potluck list and you end up with three stuffings and no cranberry sauce. A pair of exes at the party get petty during the “what I’m thankful for” part and the tension rises. You drink too much wine to help with the stress and give up on your hostess duties. Multiple dishes end up broken.