Odds & Ends

Two drunk teenagers allegedly cut off a homeless man’s head and played soccer with it “because they didn’t like the look of him.” Police in eastern Moscow believe the teens used an ax, a saw and knives to remove the man’s head. After kicking it around, they tossed it into a garbage dumpster. His body was left on the street. Police reportedly caught up with the suspects after following a trail of blood from the body to their apartment. There police located the weapons believed to be used in the crime. According to RIA Novosti news service, the apartment was “covered” in blood. Identification of the victim has reportedly been hampered because a garbage truck hauled off the trash bin the head was tossed into. If convicted of murder, the two teens each face 15 years in prison.

Dateline: England

A cash-strapped soccer club came up with what it thought was a brilliant solution to its money woes: offering a position on the team to anyone with enough money on hand. The Macclesfield Town Football Club said that for £20,000 ($29,764), “fit males between the ages of 18 and 35” could play 10 minutes of a league or cup game. “It is common knowledge that the club is in a precarious position and the club are looking at all avenues to keep the club running,” said associate director Andy Scott. Macclesfield Town ended last season £500,000 in debt. It needs to raise £100,000 by the end of August to stay in business. Unfortunately the team rescinded the offer after it became public. “We now recognise that, whatever controls are put in place, it creates a possibility of altering the outcome of a competitive fixture and as such, clearly crosses an important line with respect to the integrity of the game,” the club announced on its official website. “We are therefore withdrawing the offer and would like to apologise unreservedly to the football authorities and to the Football Conference for our error of judgement in this matter.”

Dateline: Texas

The minister of a Houston-based megachurch is apologizing for asking congregants to fund new helicopter blades for his helicopter. Bishop I.V. Hilliard of the New Light Church World Outreach and Worship Centers, Inc. sent a letter to his “Friends in Jesus” asking, “Does your car need repair or total replacement? Do you have a dream vehicle or luxury automobile you long to purchase?” If church members would send just $52, Hilliard guaranteed a special, transportation-based “breakthrough favor” direct from God within “52 days or 52 weeks.” Hilliard noted that the church’s “Aviation Department” advised him that upgrading the helicopter’s blades “will save the ministry well over $50k if we move on it right away.” The request created quite a controversy when it hit the Internet, however, with many calling Hilliard a charlatan and a gold digger. The New Light Christian Center eventually issued an apology, saying, “We sincerely regret if anyone was offended by this appeal in that it was not our intent.” The ministry said Hilliard’s letter was only directed at “friends who are familiar with the Biblical principals upon which we base our faith.” ... Particularly the part of the Bible in which Jesus preached about wanting a new helicopter.

Dateline: Virginia

Police in Fairfax County say that two men may have made off with approximately 400 koi fish from a Herndon-area business park pond. Employees told police that two men showed up claiming to be “pond maintenance workers” checking on the health of the fish in the pond. The men said some of the fish were unhealthy and needed to be removed. According to police the same two men showed up four times last month—June 8, 9, 15 and 16—to scoop fish out using nets. The fish were placed into large coolers and driven away. Employees described the fishnappers as white men in their 50s who wore sunglasses. Koi, also known as Japanese carp, can be sold on the black market for as much as $130 apiece.

Dateline: Florida

A 62-year-old woman was arrested for kissing a police officer on the nose “against his will.” Bradenton resident Peggy Hill was charged with battery for smooching a Manatee County Sheriff’s Office sergeant on the schnoz. According to the arresting officer’s report, Hill was talking to Sgt. Randy Lamb about a disturbance between Hill and one of her neighbors when the woman suddenly, “approached him and kissed him on the nose against his will. He stepped away from her, wiped off the saliva from his nose, attempted to take her into custody and she started to struggle with him.” According to the Florida Sun-Sentinel, Hill later admitted to drinking about three glasses of wine prior to the incident.