The Pros And Cons Of Going All Out In College

I wasn’t born into a trust fund, and I chose accounting over my MR degree. I’ve not been blessed with a luscious head of lettuce nor am I a top-tier boi, and to my greatest remorse, I’m not thevaginator. The more I try and deny it, the harder it hits: I’m going to have to work after college. As I sit here polishing my resume (read: bullshitting my life’s accomplishments while trying to savor every lasting bit of university life), I often ask myself: Was it worth it? Would I do anything different? Here are the pros and cons of going all out in college.

PRO: You will develop useful and marketable skills through pledgeship and fraternity life. Even if you’re not in a fraternity, you’ll learn how to be social, how to work with diverse groups of people, how to persevere through tough situations, how to be independent, and how to laugh at yourself.

CON: Some of the best experiences you’ll have in college are the ones you can’t (or really, really shouldn’t) put on a resume.

PRO: You’ll make some of the greatest memories one could ever have. You’ll meet some of the hottest women you’ve ever seen, and find friends who will have your back for life.

CON: Realistically, these friends in whom you’ve invested the bulk of your time don’t have a father who will grant you automatic employment at his car dealership upon graduation.

PRO: Several years worth of free butler service…

CON: …are worth nothing in the long run if your fraternity gets suspended or kicked off campus or if your university bans Greek life entirely.

PRO: You can go out seven days a week for four straight years.

CON: “So, I see you have a 2.8 GPA…”

PRO: $1 vodka sodas every night.

CON: Drinks at actual bars cost more money, which you’ll need a job to afford, which you may not have if you buy too many $1 vodka sodas in college.

PRO: Many professors are well connected and experienced, and can offer you invaluable academic instruction and career guidance.

CON: By skipping class to dage, you miss out on these opportunities.

PRO: Confidence, style, and game…

CON: …aren’t that effective when you have to introduce yourself as a “Freelance Internet Blogger.”

So far today we’ve had articles about a guy who cuts shit with a knife, a guy who eats detergent, a virgin, and the biggest tryhard since Fratty McFratfrat. They should rename this site TGM: Total Goober Move

The site won’t ever die as long as Vaginator is still here fucking hot bitches daily with his huge cock while you sniff your girlfriend’s dingleberries while playing video games. Shut the fuck up before you get hurt, kid.