Save The Sea Kittens!

January 14, 2009

Overfishing is a serious problem that deserves careful consideration. PETA's latest attempt to address the issue, however,
is nothing short of ludicrous. In a new campaign, the animal rights group is offering
fish an image overhaul in order to discourage recreational and commercial
fishing, or "sea kitten hunting." That's right—it's renaming fish "sea kittens."

"People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy,
and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird,
to say the least," the campaign's slick new website notes. And so enters the
new name. "[W]ho could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?" A
PETA spokesperson told NPR
this week, "Most parents would never dream of spending a weekend torturing
kittens for fun with their families, but hooking a sea kitten through the mouth
and dragging her through the water is the same as hooking a kitten through the
mouth and dragging her behind your car."

The campaign's website boasts cute cartoons of fish, er, sea
kittens, as well as bedtime
stories for kids explaining why fish—damn!—sea kittens are fun and cuddly.
But the best component is the Create
Your Own Sea Kitten game, in which you can choose an ocean buddy, name it,
and adorn it with various items—including a punk jacket, lipstick, litter box,
tiara, and floaties.

Here, though, I have a question. Wouldn't attaching floaties
to a fish force it to the surface of the water and cause it to, you know, die? Also,
as a wise friend points out, does this make cats eating food with fish in it cannibals?