Full Text

Issued Twice Weekly by the Students' Publications Board of The University of British Columbia
VOL. XVII.
VANCOUVER, B. C, TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 1935
No. 35
Institute Hears
Munday Account Of
Wadddington Tour
Lantern Lecture Given By Mr. and
Mra. Munday Saturday
Waddington-the "Mystery Mount-
am"! With this as the object and
Mr. and Mrs. Don Munday as guides,
the large audience at the Vancouver
Institute experienced new thrills on
being taken to new heights on Saturday night, from a largo collection
of lantern-slides shown by two of
Canada's greatest Alpinists.
In introducing the two pioneers of
B. C. climbing, Mr. Martin of the Alpine Club, stated that climbing was
aa safe as taking one's car down the
highway to the States Moreover,
having several Switzerlands within
the one province of B.C., we have a
great field for further exploration.
Inland Tour Described
Mrs. Munday graphically described
the various methods of travelling inland. The trip commenced at Squam-
lsh by means of the P.G.E., which
took the party through some of the
province's most picturesque country
to William ake. From here, the al-
plnlsts were conveyed by open truck
to Tatha Lake, their "jumping off"
place. At this point, tho party met
with their pack tram of 17 horses.
The trials of travelling by pack
horse are many, stated Mrs. Munday.
The hazardous crossing of rushing
torrents with water up lo the saddle
was as unea3y for the riders as it
was insecure for the hot ses. However these various troubles were com- [
pensated by the cheerful presence of
the packers themselves. "Pete" and
"Vellou" proved to be the most useful and entertaining of men to have
on such a trip. Another benefit of
travelling on horseback was the ability one had of viewing a* leisure the
beautiful mountain flowers. In this
manner, fording rushing streams,
crossing dangerous swamps and picking their way through precarious
rock-slides the pack tiiin reached
Scimitar Lake, tho base camp.
Scimitar Lake Base Camp
At Scimitar Lake, the base camp
party entrenched themselves, while
the climbing party rested a few days.
With three pack horses the climbing
party mcved up to high camp on the
glacier. Here food was cached and
from this camp the party travelled
lightly carrying only ihe absolute
necessities.
Since the Main Tower cf Waddington appeared impossible and the N.E.
peak had already been climbed in
1928, the party climbed or,e of the adjoining, peaks. This peak was so
precipitous that in roping up, the
climbers could only move one
at a time. On finally reaching the
top, 12,400 feet, the alpinists decided
to stay for thc night.
View From Peak
So scarce was the space that Mr.
and Mrs. Munday had to hang their
legs over the edge of the crag. Although one of the most hazardous
and uncomfortable nights she had
spent, Mrs. Munday declared that
this experience was inexchangeable.
From their wonderful vantage point,
they saw the .-sun go clown in a clear
sky behind the mountains, gilding
the tops and suddenly chopping below the horizon, only to be replaced
by the pale even light of the moon,
then the dawn.
The climbers left their crag soon
after dawn and "roped down" until
they regained the glacier. Now they
decided to explore Live glacier and
climb further peaks. However, weather conditions being fev.-cboding, they
were forced back to thoir high camp.
Here a much-relieved fellow member of the party await vd them, who
was on the point of taking last messages back to civilization. A fearful
blizzard raged all night, lipping their
tents to shreds. Very little climbing
was now possible, so within a day
or two, the climbing part/ made their
way back to '.he base camp.
Map Work Done
Together with climbing, the alpinists did valuable work in mapping.
It is from this source ,/e have some
of our own knowledge of these mountains.
In closing, Mrs, Munday stated that
Mt. Waddington, 13,260 feet, the
highest mountain in B.C., was still
the goal of her husband and herself.
"It Is a tremendous challenge."
Profettor^Larten
Frosh Hop
At Embassy
'38 Stages First Party Friday
THORLIEF LARSEN
Professor Thorlief Larsen, Honorary
President of the Players' Club and of
the illustrious freshman class, Arta '38,
is much in demand at this busy season
of the spring term. He acted as patron for the class party last Friday
and will take a prominent part in
preparations for "Hedda Gabler."
Hoopers And
Queen Share
Pef) Honours
Pep Meeting Friday
The Queen! On Friday, she will be
seen in all her glory. The noon hour
pep meeting will feature, in addition
to the Queen of the Junior Prom,
Len Chamberlain and his Trianon
Orchestra, and the basketball team.
With this all star aggregation of talent, the meet promises to be one of
the heit yet presented.
All ballots for the queen must be
in the box at the foot of the caf stairs
by Thursday night. Candidates for
the honor are; Tho Carson twins,
Cwen Pym, Dc'.ly Elliot, Margaret
Buchanan, Donna Moorehousc, Mary
Young, Masal.-i Cosgrave, Vivian McKenzie, Loise Farris, Mollie Winckler.
At the request of the stage committee, the show will immediately
stop if any lunches or lunch papers
are thrown on the stage.
VOCATIONAL GUIDANCE
Miss Laura Holland will speak
on Wednesday noon In Arts 100
on "Social Service." This lecture
will be of interest to both men
and women.
Streamers, whirtles, French pastries,
Cam Smith1 and orchestra, and cheerful paper bonnets were some of the
attractive features of the Freshman
class party Friday night. Embassy
Ballroom was the scene of festivities,
and an effervescent crowd of dancers
displayed great pleasure In being
present.
The spirit of carefree abandon and
general enthusiasm shown was noteworthy. William Whimster, president
of A.M.U.S., said, with dignity, "You
may quote me as saying that this is
a damflne party." James Ferris, ex-
Junior Member and ex-president of
Arts '36, exclaimed, "I'm having a
helluvaswell time." Tommy Lea remarked, "I'm having a glorious time,
and aren't the girls cute!" while J.
Gordon Hilker stated, after some
thought, "Colossal!"
Honorary President Speaks
Supper was served downstairs, and
was featured by a few words from
Professor Larsen, Honorary President
of the class of '38, who remarked,
"This is the first class in fifteen
years that has had the good sense to
elect me to this office." The supper
tables were attractive with hats and
favors.
Clubs Present
Later in the evening, the Players
Club and Musical Society dropped in,
further enlivening the scene. Most
striking costume of the evening was
Phrateres Plans
Social_Affairs
Although the social affairs of Phrateres will, of necessity, be planned
on a limited budget the Council of
the local organization is making plans
for a Faculty tea to be held on Saturday, March 11. Mrs. R. Killam, 1695
Laurier, has offered her home for
the occasion.
A large number of co-eds have decided to be Initiated Into Phrateres,
and are looking forward enthusiastically to the ceremony. Initiation is
not compulsory, but it entitles the'
co-ed to active membership In the
organization, to the privilege of wearing the Phrateres pin, a gold replica
of the Greek letter Phi, and to
hold office.
Sub-chapter meetings which have
been held in ths past week, took the
form of social gatherings, thereby
enabling the members to become better acquainted. The Council meetings, to which each sub-chapter president is a delegate, will take place
every two weeks, alternating with
the executive meetings.
A council meeting will be held on
Tuesday, Feb. 26, In Arts 108 at noon,
followed by an important all-Phra-
teres meeting on Thursday, Feb. 28,
in Arts 100, at 12:10 sharp.
Plant Co-ed Ball
worn by Janet Davidson, Frosh class
secretary. It consisted largely of
seven strands of orange streamer,
confetti, a double lei of ivy, and accessories from several paper hats.
Facial Fungus For Beacon Contest
CLARE BROWN
The Co-Ed Ball on Friday will be
a climax to Clare Brown's brilliant
term as president of the Women's
Undergraduate Society. This year
has been a busy and fruitful one for
Clare, she has proved a most efficient and enterprising president and
has succeeded among other things u.
bringing Phrateres to the campts,
long her ambition.
Co>Ed Pepsters
Advertise Ball
Emerson and Co-eda Stage Show
"This is the result of nine days' growth, following the edict
of the M. U. S. banning the use of Gillettes on the campus. Some
of the male students are packing these hairy appendages around
the campus so that the students will be Stadium conscious all
day."
NOTICE
Information concerning tha research
scholarships offered by the Galileo
Galilei Foundation at he Royal University of Pisa may be obtained from
the Registrar.
U. B. C. FACES EPIDEMIC OF
MEASLES
The students of the University
have been exposed to infection
from measles during the past
week, according to the University Medical Authorities, which
means that all students who
have not yet had measles are liable to come down with it and
should report at once to the
University Health Service.
A man in Third Year Applied Science developed tho infection on February 20.
Any person, therefore, who
has been in contact with the
student and who has not had
mtasles previously will possibly
come down with the disease.
In this case, the student was
attending lectures at the University and thoroughly exposed
everyone he Of* altered.
It is the duty, therefor.e of all
students to report to the Health
Service at once in order that
they may be thoroughly examined. In this way we will be
able to avoid any epidemic outbreak on the Campus,
In the meantime any student
feeling in any way indisposed is
requested to remain at home
and inform the Health Service
over the telephone.
With this explanation tho above cut
was run in the Ubyssey on February
3, 1931, at the time of the great stadium campaign, and is an indication
of the virility of student beards in
that golden ago,
Ambitious moio students will now
have an opportunity to measure up
to the achievements of their predecessors and make a little money by
so doing. For the Beacon Theatre is
offering a first prize of $7.50 and a
second prize of $2.50 to the two best
beards grown by undergraduates between now and March 18.
This contest is being run in con
nection with the picture "The Good
Fairy," which is being shown at the
Beacon at that time. In this picture
Herbert Marshall has grown a beard,
which the heroine does not like, and
the ostensible object of the theatre
management is to discover whether
university students can grow a better one. Contestants will be required
to appear on the stage on March 18,
and the winners will be decided by
the applause of the audience. It has
been suggested that certain campus
organizations might back their own
candidates,
This is a case where early inactivity will win the day.
Grand opera, a fashion parade, popular dance music, and a pair of female pep leaders were only a few
features of the Co-Ed Pep Meet Mon-
I day noon. Jean Meredith and Leona
Nelson opened the program with a
Varsity rock, and Jack Emerson provided the music, introducing three
new artists. A s*ir was created when
ancestral portraits on the wall entered into the spirit of the meeting
with terpsichorean writhings, which,
however, were no^t appreciated by
Emerson,
Dean Bollert was "flattered to find
herself the heroine of such a clever
opera".
"No Thanks, My Dear," a song by
Clair Green, wrs sung for the first
time by Jack Worthington, with enthusiastic acclaim.
After a brief sermon on etiquette
at pep meetings, in which he denounced the audience as an assembly
of "baboons," Emerson presented his
opera "Garnet and the Princess." Due
to tho presence in the audience of
Dean Bollert, the second and third
acts were omitted. The meeting
closed with a fashion parade suggesting costumes suitable for the Co-Ed,
and an invasion cf Sciencemen disguised as co-eds, or was it vice
versa?
NOTICE
Will the person who is detaining
my Bi. 1 notes in a shiny black stiff-
covered note-book, please return at
once as they are very valuable to me,
via Arts Letter Rack. Marianne Cecil.
LOST
Light fawn, fleece-lined, doc-skin
gloves, lost Thursday, Feb. 14, in
Arts Building or in the Library. Will
finder please return to Madeline Ellis, via Arts Letter Rack.
IRA SWARTZ IN RECITAL
Union College chapel will be the
scene for an unusual event tomorrow,
Wednesday, Feb. 27, at 8:15. This
will be a piano recital by Ira Swartz,
distinguished Vancouver pianist and
once member of Arts '24.
The recital is sponsored by Womens' Association of Union College.
Mr. Swartz will be assisted by Daphne Carapata, violiniste. Tickets are
35 cents.
LOST
A blue loose-ieaf note-book. Please
return to Clarence Idyll, at Pub office.
My Choice For
-.*
JLNICR PECM QUEEN
Is
Library Number.
Student League Will
Sponsor Lecturer
Pete* Munro of the Street Railway-
men's Union will give an address under the auspices of the Student League
of Canada in Arts 100 on Thursday
noon. Mr. Munro was one of a trade
union delegation which recently returned from the Soviet Union. He
will address the meeting on his experiences in that country.
HISTORICAL SOCIETY
OPEN FOR MEMBERSHIP
Applications for membership in the
Historical Sociwty will be received
until Monday, March 11. Membership is open to students, interested
in History, who will be entering their
third year next fall.
The purpose of the Society is to
stimulate interest in History through
discussion of historical problems.
Meetings aro held fortnightly
throughout tho year, at which papers are read ar.d discussed. Applications should bo addressed to Rose
Whelan, via thc Arts Letter Rack.
The Society will meet Tuesday, Feb.
26, at 8 p.m. at the home of Mrs. F.
H. Soward, 1475 Tolmie street.
STOP PRESS
Nominations for President of the
Alma Mater Society must be in before March 6, elections to be held
March 12.
'Social Service
Worker Will
Speak Here
I MISS LAURA HOLLAND IN VOCATIONAL SERIES
Miss Laura Holland, who will give
an address on Social Work on Wednesday In the Vocational Series sponsored by the Alumni Association, ia
a prominent member of the profession to which she belongs. Her training and experience, coupled with a
vivid personality, have made her one
of the outstanding women in Social
Work in Canada.
She was born in Montreal, spent
her childhood in Nova Scotia, and
went to school at St. Mildred's College, Toronto. She devoted many
years of her early life to the study
of music, and a notable concert career was being predicted for her,
when she suddenly decided to tram
as a nurse. She graduated from the
Montreal General Hospital and after
a year of private nursing went Overseas in 1915 with the C A.M.C.
Awarded Royal Red Cross
Until the signing of the Armistice
she served in England, France, Lem-
nos and Salonika, and was awarded
the Royal Red Cross in recognition
of he« work. At the conclusion of
the War she returned tc» Canada, and
proceeded to Boston to enter the
School of Social Work at Simmons
College, one of the finest institutions
of its kind on the continent. She
graduated from there in 1920 and
went immediately into the Social
Work Department of the Montreal
General Hospital. From there she
was called by the Ontario Red Cross
to initiate outpost work. She held
this position with the greatest success for the next two years, and it
was for the service she rendered
here that in 1934 she was awarded the
decoration of Commander of the
British Empire In the King's New
Year Honours.
Welfare Director ln Toronto
When she left the Red Cross she
was made Director of the Division of
Social Welfare in Toronto, and held
this position until in August, 1927,
sho was calle/j by the Children's Aid
Society of Vancouver to become Managed, In August, 1931, she entered
the Provincial Welfare Service as
Deputy Superintendent of Neglected
Children, a position in which she has
done must valuable work.
Lectures at U. B. C.
Besides her official position, Miss
Holland lectures in Child Welfare at
the University, is President of the
Canadian Association of Overseas
Nurses, and is generally recognized
as an authority on child welfare.
She will speak on opportunities in
the social work field, not only as to
the women students, but also to the
men, a3 it is being demonstrated today that both men and women can
find opportunities in this field.
Junior Queen Will
Appear This Week
Polls WiU Close Thursday 3 pjn.
Voting for the Junior Prom Queen
has begun — witness green-labelled
ballot box at the foot of the caf stairs.
Each and every student attending the
University of British Columbia is entitled to one vote. The honour system is to be employed with regard
to ballots. The polls will be closed
at 3 p.m. Thursday. The queen will
appear at the Arts Men's Pep Meet
on Friday. Competition will be close.
Thefe will be a police force on hand
to prevent violence in the vicinity of
the ballot box, and candidates will
be protected during the week by
picked body-guards.
COMING EVENTS
Tuesday, Feb. 26
12 noon, Arts 105, Literary,
Forum.
12:10 p.m., Arts 108, Phrateres
Council Meeting.
12 noon, Arts 100, Mrs. Don
Munday "Mountain Climbing."
9:30 p.m., Swimming Club
Party, Crystal Pook
Wednesday, Feb. 27
12 noon, Arts 204, V.C.U., Rev.
Elbert Paul, "Communism and
Christianity."
12 noon, Arts 100, Vocational
Guidance,
9 p.m., Adanacs vs. Varsity,
Senior A Basketball, U.B.C.
Gym., Senior B Preliminary.
Thursday, Feb. 28
12:10 noon. Arts 100, Phrateres
General Meeting, \
Page Two
THE UBYSSEY
Tuesday, February 26,1935
(Member C.I.P., P.I.P.A.)
Telephone: Point Grey 206
Issued twice weekly by the Students' Publication Board
of the Alma Mater Society of the University of British
Columbia.
Mail Subscriptions $2. per Year
Campus Subscriptions 11.50 per Year
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF: Archie Thompson
SENIOR EDITORS
Tuesday: Darrel Gomery Friday: Zoe Browne-Clayton
News Manager: John Cornish
Sports Editor: Donald Macdonald
Associate Sports Edlton Clarence Idyll
Associate Editors: Murray Hunter, John Logan
Feature Editor: Margaret Ecker
Assistant Sport Editor: Kemp Edmonds
Assistant Editors: Dorwin Baird, Norman Depoe
Donna Lucas, Pauline Patterson
Literary Editor: Arthur Mayas
Cartoonist: John Davidson
Columnists: Alan Morley, Nancy Miles
Circulation Manager: Stuart De Vitt
Circulation Assistant] Alan W*lah
General: Madge Neill, Dave Petaplece, Shinobu Higashi,
Jim Beverage, Ruth Hall, Ken Grant, Bob McKenzie,
Rex A. Morrison, Lleyd Hobden, Nick Rodin, W. T.
Robertson. Bob King, Sheila Buchanan, Doreen Agnew,
Stanley Wistall, Frank Seaman, Bob Melville, K. D. M.
Patterson.
Sport: Bill Stott, Morgan Rhodes, Paul Kozoolin, Milton
Taylor.
Advertising Manager: Tad. Jeffery
Exchange Editor: Dorwin Baird
TOTEM STAFF
Editor: Alan Baker
Associate Editor: Jack McDermot
Assistant Editors: Katherlne Scott, Don Hogg, Paddy
Colthurst
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 1935
THE READING HABIT
The reading habit is the most valuable as
set to be gained from a university education,
and pathetically few students ever acquire it.
Too many people blame the inadequacy of the
university courses for a narrowness which is
really due to their own lack of curiosity.
The U3.C. library is one of the best in
Canada, and the librarians are very trusting.
Some students shun the loan desk as though
there were some stigma attached to those who
avail themselves of library privileges, others
peer cautiously into the stacks as into a deep
and horrible well, inhabited by evil spirits.
Freshmen have been known to boast that they
have never borrowed a library book, in tones
which indicated a mine of knowledge under
the gay green exterior.
There is no need to become a book worm,
weaving scholastically in and out of dusty vol
umes, to enjoy the individual part of an edu
cation. It is more or less essential to attend all
one's lectures if one wishes to pass, whether
they be interesting or as dry as peanut butter
sandwiches in July (which too many of them
are). But it is not at all necessary to read
uninteresting books, and it doesn't take America's Brightest Boy to find something, even on
the top floor of the stacks, interesting enough
to take home. Half an hour with a book is enough to prevent the blank stare and open
mouth when it is discussed. Such brief examination of books utilizes the lazy periods
—before lunch, after dinner, at three o'clock,
and on Saturday mornings. Worth-while occupation of the few slack moments in college
may lead to fuller appreciation in later life of
what is known as "spare time".
ft
183B CSS ®E8
The Walku i
By Nancy Miles
A propos of absolutely nothing, unless it
is to show the inconsistency of the feminine
mind, today we give you a couple of theat
rical notes. According to our informant, who
so obligingly told them to us, they are, in
creditable as it may seem, bona fide.
They both concern companies which were
presenting the well-known opus, "Uncle Tom's
Cabin." And right here we promise not to
mention reviews which talk about the sup
port the dogs got from the rest of the caste.
Both stories concern that stupendous scene,
wherein Little Eva is trapezed up to heaven.
The first has a Russian background.
Perhaps you know that the Russian faith is
no longer orthodox. They don't admit of any
heaven except ideal community employment.
So little Eva went through her scene of
tear jerking, pathos, and she had been such
a good girl that she just had to go somewhere
as a reward for virtue, so down came the rope,
and off went little Eva like the daring young
man on the flying trapeze.
Where to?
Ah, look at the program notes.
Yes, sir, she went off to a job in the cement factory.
The other story happened in the great democracy to the .south. It was a very naive company. Came Eva's big scene, and off she was
rushed to heaven, via the stage drops overhead.
The audience was wildly enthusiastic, applauded, stamped and whistled. Called for Eva.
And what happened?
A stage manager, anxious to please, personally took over the ropes which were res
ponsible for little Eva's ascent, and lowered
her half way, gave the rope a little fillip, so
that a consternated Eva jerked spasmodically,
then off she zoomed to heaven again, and to get
a few remarks off to the stage manager.
Also there was the reviewer who, of a
mediocre musical revue said, "I seem to have
knocked everything but the chorus girls'
knees, and nature beat me there."
CLASS & CLUB
LA CANADIENNE
The last meeting of the year will
be held tonight at the home of Dr.
A. F. B. Clark, 5037 Maple street.
Dr. Clark will speak on the history
of French music. Elections will be
held for the offices of president and
secretary.
V. C. u.
Wednesday at noo*. Rev. Elbert
Paul will speak on "Communism and
Christianity, a Contrast."
MATHEMATICS CLUB
The regular meeting of the Mathematics Club was held Thursday
evening at the home of Myles Ritchie.
Three very interesting talks were
given by' Dave Mitchell, Jack Par-
nail, and Bob Houston, who spoke
on "Theory of Least Squares," Binary Stars," and "Comets" respectively.
CLASSICS CLUB
The Classics Club will meet tomorrow, Wednesday, Feb. 27, at the
home of Porf. L. Robartson, 1650 Wesbrook Crescent.
An illustrated address on "Greek
Sculpture will be given by Miss Marjorie Wilson.
Ex-members of the club are invited
to this meeting.
TIME-HONOURED
WAY
Many experiments have been attempted •
in making cigarettes, but nothing has yet
been found to equal the time-honoured
Sweet Caporal method. It calls for the
choicest tobaccos, aged and mellowed
like vintage wine foraf least thirty months,
then firmly rolled in the finest papers. It
requires a large amount of money,
and complete facilities, but it's the only
way to make a good cigarette. This is
why more and more
smokers are saying
every day that "Sweet
Caporals are milder—
and they taste better'
SWEET
CAPORAL
CIGARETTES
7fct purwttermln
which tobtccoun
be imolicd"
'anctt
SAVE THE POKER HANDS
LA CAUSERDS
A combined meeting of La Causerie
and L'Alouette will be held on Tuesday, Feb. 26, at 8 p.m. at the home
of Marion Paton, 1865 West Thirteenth
avenue. Get off car at Cyprus, walk
up to 13th and turn east.
S. C. M.
Mrs. Don Munday, Illustrated lecture on Mountain Climbing, Arts 100,
Tuesday noon.
CHOOSING COURSES
The majority of the students at this university are probably still undecided as to the
vocation which they will take up after graduation. This is particularly true of the freshmen and sophomores. It is true that attendance at a university should make it easier to
find the career to which one is best suited, but
at the same time it is also true that a student
can make a more intelligent selection of courses
if he knows what his life work is to be.
Thus the undergraduate's problem is a difficult one. For in his first two years he is not
Useless Information
Today is the anniversary of the birth of
Victor Hugo, who was born in 1802. More topically, it is also the birthday of yours with love
and kisses, who wasn't born quite so far back.
Intellectual Obfuscatlons Solved, Dept.
About the bananas, do you remember that
far back?
An answer has been forthcoming. The lab
instructor did not eat them, nor did anyone
else. They were very over-ripe bananas and
are being used to feed a lot of flies which are
being raised in one of the labs for experimental
purposes.
I. Q. Dept.
Here is a problem which takes some grey
matter to figure out. It seems to have been
bandied about the campus recently, nevertheless, we give it to you:
An employer had a job to give out. There
were three very intelligent applicants, but he
wanted the most intelligent, so he tested them.
He showed them five discs, three whites
and two blacks. Then he pinned a disc onto
each man's back. When a man figured what
color the disk on his back was, without looking
at his own or questioning, he was to leave the
room. After ten minutes, one of them walked
out, said he had on a white one, and got the
job.
For your own information, all three had on
white discs. Any one could look at the backs of
the other two, and the matter is worked out by
in any position to know what the relative val
ue of the various courses which he can take Pure rationalization
will be to him in his particular circumstances; We> Arthur John and I, have the answer by
and if in his final years he does make a de- the tail at Present, and unless we lose it, we'll
cision he may find that he is studying the let y°u know next week-
wrong subjects at university and that owing to And we hoPe vou see Wack sP°ts before the
the requirement of certain perequisites in eyes all week, just as we did.
the first or second year he cannot study the
courses which he wants without remaining at to select as many as possible of the prerequisite
the university for a longer time'than he can courses, which he may later need, in his first
ART CLUB
The Art Club meets Wednesday,
Feb. 27, at $11 Nicola street. Miss
Margaret Palmer will speak on "Art
In the Theatre."
OUTDOOR CLUB
There will be a meeting of the Outdoor Club in the Ap. Sc. 237 at noon,
Wednesday, Feb. 27.
PHILOSOPHY CLUB
There will be a meeting of the
Philosophy Club this evening at the
home of Miss Mildred Orr, 4689 McKenzie street, at 8 o'clock. Dr. Topping will read a paper on Walter
Litmann's Preface to Morals. McDonald street but leaves Broadway
at the half-hour
GERMAN CLUB
The next meeting of the German
Club will be held Thursday, Feb. 28,
at the home of Dr. and Mrs. A. F. B.
Clark, 5037 Maple street. The meeting will take the form of a recital
of German songs. Everybody out, 8
p.m. BE PROMPT! 8 p.m.
CHEMISTRY SOCIETY
A closed meeting of the Chemistry
Society will be held Wednesday, Feb.
27, at 8 p.m. at the home of R. J.
Donald, 3868 W. 34th. The speakers
are J. A. Spragge, M. Ritchie, R. H.
B. French. All mmebers are cordially Invited to attend.
TO WHOM IT IS DUE
We are very pleased to quote the
following:
"The executive of the SMUS is to
be complimented on the fine way in
which they conducted the Science affair this year. The banquet, Class
party .and Ball all went over hi traditional Science style.
The executive has maintained a
unity of purpose and a working coordination that haa made these Science events more than successful.
Good going, Brynelsen and the rest,
we're for you!"
J. L. Witbeck.
is due to the fellows who turned out
and did their best to win. We hope
that in the future another winning
Science team will be developed to
carry on the good work of this year's
graduating class.
SCIENCE PEP MEET
From rumors that are prevalent the
Science pep meet is going to be good,
in fact it should raise the roof—the
aud. needs a new roof anyway.
All fellows interested in putting
this over are asked to get In touch
with their executive and give them
every co-operation.
This is going to be the last pep
meet of the year and it is up to us
to put it over in old time Science
style. "LETS GO SCIENCE!"
afford to remain.
It is impossible to solve this question if one
and second years.
And at the same time he should try to form
E. I. C. NEWS
Dr. Victor Dolmage delivered a
very interesting talk on "The Gold
Boom" at last week's meeting. He
described conditions from the point
of view of a professional Geologist
and made many worthwhile remarks
abput the relation of gold to the mining profession.
On March 7 the annual meeting
will be held and prominent practising
engineers will be invited to hear student engineers deliver papers that
will undoubtedly be of considerable
interest to everyone. Keep this date
open Fellows!
has not yet set himself a goal in life, but if a definite idea of the type of training which he
one is in doubt the best plan is to obtain ad- whether it is to be broad and general, or mere- j
vice from different older students and alumni expects to obtain from his college career —
on the subject, and then on the basis of this ly academic.
SCIENCE SCORES AGAIN
Fine work Science '35! You showed
the old Science ffght in pulling up
and placing in the winners in the
classic Arts '20 relay.
Although other Science class teams
were not so successful every credit
QUOTATIONS
Harris lament: "There is only one
pub on the campus and that is the
essence of dryness."
* • •
Mr. West: "Stop that, Lowe, Love."
* • •
King: "The Condenser was set up
in a downward position."
* • •
E. G.: "'Love is bllnd'-he must
use the Braille System!"
The proximity of exams must be
bothering the fellows because their
wisecracks are not up to par, they
seem to be cracking under the strain.
Hear
CHERNIAVSKY
Brilliant Russian Pianist
With
Vancouver
Symphony
Society
Allard de Ridder, conductor
STRAND
THEATRE
Sunday, March 3
3 p.m.
Get tickets early at J. W. Kelly
Piano Co. Telephone Trinity
1638 or Seymour 7066.
The Accounts of the
Fioulty & Students
of
The University of
British Columbia
are welcomed by
BANK OF
MONTREAL
Established 1817
WEST POINT OREY BRANCH
Trimble and Tenth Avenue West
A. B. MOORE, Manager
THE DEUT8CHLAND CAFE
(Opposite Orpheum Theatre)
VANCOUVER'S MOST UP-TO-DATE CAFE
Special Luncheons and Dinners
Afternoon Teas with Tea-cup, Card and Palm Readings
SUPPER DANCE - NO COVER CHARGE
University Book Store
Hours: 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Loose-Leaf Note Books, Exercise Books and Scribblers
at Reduced Prices
Graphic and Engineering Paper, Biology Paper
Loose-Leaf Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink
Ink and Drawing Instruments
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.
ALL YOUR BOOK SUPPLIES SOLD HERE «?«
Saroyanesque
I am sitting in the library, wonder-
it what to write about. . . Perhaps
lean Nvrite about tho other people
tn. Across from mo are three girls.
Sty are doing accountancy, I think
j. .no, only two of them.
I has a red dru<tf and black hair;
lhu a red dress and brown hair;
I has a brown aress and red lipstick
..she has btown hair too . . . she
nan glasses, but is tho prettiest of
i« three. They are doing more gigging than accounting ... 1 has at
ait stopped gifcrling ar.d is looking
jeacefully out the window ... tho
jhers ara working ... 1 is standing
jftnd the other two—they seem to
^discussing ineir work, but not too
if iriously ... 1 Li gono. They arc
] ucussing hcv—but not for long—
I icy are working again, seriously
zv. They arc taking down figures
^m Ihe same chart, looking up al-
jnatcly and moving restlessly now
d then ... A tall man' just came
a, 3 turned to Jnok at him. 2 didn't.
: tits back, looks a he? work, then
to pen ... 2 has a perpetual look
i surprise. 3 looks palcid ... 2
Mchcs for another paper with figures
a it. She takes her purse-, hesitates,
9tm it, takes, out a pencil . . .They
loth sit back—3 with a sigh of re-
j.1. She holds up the chart, puts
l down, works again ... 2 starts
acting. They turn tho chart over,
rj-settle themselves, begin to work
...They must be tire-l of working
-both look faintly disgusted. They
put away the chart and' take out
books, talk in whispers . . 3's lip-
sick needs retouching; she has been
Scking her lips ond the Inside of
them looks white by contrast ... I
think they are getting suspicious—I
keep looking at them as 1 write. (One
i the fans has just been turned off).
Imust look funny—for a long time
laat brooding, then suddenly began
to write rapidly . . . The accountants
ire still talking and writing desultorily ... I am getting bored ... I
»iU go and show someone what I
have written . .
2
I couldn't find him . . I am now
in the basement, talking and smoking a cigarette. We agree that the
buildings are too hot—especially tho
Scwnce building—I couldn't keep
awake in a lecture there the other
day ... He has gone now The other
people here annoy me . . .
3
I am back again, after a trip outside to finish my cigarette. I came
in soon—it is snowing hard . . . The
accountants are still hero . . I am sit-
i- '3
1
ting under a picture of the Virgin
Mary. She is holding Jesus—at least
I think it is the Virgin. There is
another woman In the'picture. Also
a pope—ho looks like Peter the Hermit. I know he is a pope because
he has the triple-crown beside him
... He was not contemporary with
the Virgin. But she is standing on
clouds so it must be a vision. No—
the clouds seem to be supporting him
too ... At thc bottom ere two stupid-looking cherubs, leaning on the
picture frame. Green curtains are
looped back at the top—in the picture, I mean. I wonder why? I can
see a mcr.'s face too—behind St. Anno
—is it St. Anno? . . . Thc Virgin has
bare feet and the clouds look cold-
like snow — but she docs not seem
cold. She is pretty ... I wish I
knew what picture it is—it has no
label—probably I should know anyway—I took History 13. Italian Renaissance, judging by the clothes. . , .
a reprodutcion, that is. The library
has no money fer originals. It looks
like a good picture. Ono of tho curtains is wrong' though—I would like
to straighten it ... I must find out
what this sounds like to someone
else . . .
He said it sounded lii-e hell ....
Another friend of mine made up a
poem:
I like the Letter.? Club
And they like me.
The food they serve
Is quite superh.
And that's why I go, you see.
Would the club thiitk that was
funny? Or wculd it annoy them?
The accountants are still working. I
wish I could get some work done. I
guess I could if I wanted to. Not
here though. It's too lot.
5
I had some interesting thoughts
coming home. Eut I couldn't write
thorn down. It was snowing. And
I was walking ... All about me and
Saroyan, Kublai Khan and Marco
Polo, and Donn Brync . . I showed
it to someone. He said it was interesting, but. He probably thought it
was ro'.tcn, but didn't want to offend
mo. Ho couldn't. I advised him to
try it sometime-it's very interesting.
Ho said this was unusual and it doesn't pay to be unucual. lie offered me
a short story, he wrote Uio wrote the
poem too). But I like to be honest
... I think this ii good. T plagiarized
tho title. But then I haven't road it.
Maybe that's why Saroyan likes his
stuff. Maybe we're right . . .
—Robert Clark.
A.—.—..
With Geraniums For The Blind Man
torn steel, bits
of cast iron
tearing
at frantic flesh,
steam
cauterizing broken skin . . .
cool white nurses,
young doctors
coming
to prod the
blue scars over
sawn-off bone . . .
"This is good; the scars
as they should be,
he lives . .
But this clutching
at life ... It would be better
that he die."
Only four white walls,
no further. At first
bitter, but becoming
reconciled . .
Not tho deception
of faith, nor growing
resigned, but
slowly tho pcaco
of being alone; thinking
of himself, and not
fearing sleep . . . But
only four white walls,
no further.
And then Tanyusha,
Tanyusha
of tho golden
limbs,
and Ihe clear
eyes, ,
cams
with her sudden smile,
and the remembrance
of summer nights
ycf about her . . .
But
her gaiety nil frightened,
and only terrible pity
in her eyes . . .
"my love, O
my love forgive me."
and her grieving . . .
The pain at his heart,
and the coldness . . .
The four white walls
receding . . .
"Tanyusha
before you go
you will kiss nie,
nor shall we ever . . .
not again . . ."
Her arm
about his head, and
her cold lips «
on his . . .
and afterwards
• sweating there,
staring
into the darkness
a long timo
thc thin sheet
and wooden
corpses . . .
only u shaduvv
in a septic shroud
a cold ledge
tho last support . .
"somewhere, but not -
here, must be life
and loveliness'
"Tanyusha
Tanyusha"
no bitterness, no anger
nor was there any love.
IN MEMCRIAM
As one who loved fine things and rare,
And spared us neither hand nor eye,-
But gave us all that we could share,
And more than we could buy ....
So we, we may have learnt to seek
For things beyond the graceless day;
To see them shine and hear them speak,
Because he showed the way ....
Because his wit was friendliness ....
Because the man himself was true:
He gave us of himself, no less,
And more no man can do.
—Anonymous.
The Genesis
A Comedy
The Green Pool
Prologue.
The gods so loved the world
That-
Thoy filled it full of Apes.
Big Apes, medium-sized Apes,
and little Apes
Now these Anci
dearly beloved Apes,
Squabbled, hated, loved
and multiplied.
Then one day
Thoy all ran down the Hill,
away from their gods
So that they could join
Charlie Darwin's Circus
—Reg. J.
The curtain rii.ee to reveal a large
well-furnished private office, such as
Sinclair Lewis' Babbitt might have
known. In tha middle oi thc back
wall a sign bearing the word 'Hoavcn'
is hanging. Tlirough tall windows at
the side planets, stars, etc., arc visible.
In the centre of the st-ige two polished mahogany desks ar.1 placed. Beside each desk is a collarette; two ice-
buckets ar-j also in evidence.
At til: desks, back to back, two
angels (denoted as such by halos.
etc.) aro sitting. On the right desk,
facing the audience, is a placard
reading 'Socntary of Amusements',
and thc left desk carries a similar
one on which the words Under Secretary of Amucment' appear. As
the play commences, both secretaries
ara indusrtiously writing. Suddenly
thc. Secretary speaks to the Under-
Secretary, both still scribbling and
back to back.
Act I Scene I
Secretary: My boy, Hoavcn is dull.
Under Sec: Yes, very dull. (Goes
on writing).
Secretary: In fact, somewhat boring.
Under Sec: Yes, very boring. (Continues as before^.
Secretary: Something must be dono.
Under Sec: And very quickly.
Only yesterday I heard the Junior
God bemoan the fact that he had not
been born Mohainctan-their Hoavcn.
you* know . . .
Secretary: V.cs, I know. But what
can we do? W«* havo tried every
possible form of entertainment. Thc
gods are interested for a while, and
then they demand something new. At
present they sit and stare in the
Judgment Hall. Harp music, endless
harp music, is so monotonous.
Under Sec: And goldon seats arc
so hard.
Secretary: (Swinging around in his
seat) Something must be done.
Under Sec: (Turning also) I have
it, Remember that piece of matter
that flew off thc sun the other year?
Secretary: That little tning.
Under Sec: Well, it has cooled
down now. Wo will uco it for a
sort of a stage.
Secretary: But tho r.ods are no
longer amused by plays.
Under Sec: Wait a minute. This
won't, in that mannor, bo a play.
We shall creaV n people, and put
them on this new littlo planet. They
will, naturally, evolve, and so provide an ever changing source of amusement. Not realizing tho comedy
of their situation they will say their
littlo speeches, ond go through their
pitiful motion with all tho gravity of
the Junior God's stepfather at a
special meeting of the Higher Court.
Secretary: I sec you,- idea. But
your actors will soon become discontented with their parts. They will
refuse to conform when they see
through it all.
Under Sec.: No. Wo will make
their minds such as to early conceive
a belief in their own immortality. We
must also give them a faith in a
bcnovolcnt power. They will alternately curse pray and cower before
this power; much to the amusement
of the weary gods.
Secretary: To keep them from rebelling they'll have to have some
hope after death.
Under Sec: Thcir'own egotism will
take care of that. And they will
have, to help them to bo contented
with life, a quevr ability to cling to
the hope that no matto" how bad it
is today, tomorrow will La all right.
Secretary: Let's divid; this Mankind of yours up into different races,
each having its own color, religion
and customs. Every race will imagine themselves to have been made
in god's image. Thus will they squabble among themselves, calling upon
their own gods for aid. All will use
their religions as an excuse for war.
The territory oi temporal princes
shall bo furtlvercd under tho banner
of a Princc of Peace. Multitudes
shall be murdered in holy wars. The
weak shall be exploited in the interests of civilization. All ol which will
mightily amuso the gods.
Under Sec: Wc shall commence
this scheme at once.
Secretary: My dear fcl!ow, not so
fast. I am under the impression that
I am head of this depar.mcnt.
Under Sec: I bog your pardon.
Secretary: Yes. Remember that in
the future I shall give the orders.
Now what were we talking about—
oh yes, those people of yours. Several types wil bo required; there must
be some variety to the prayers offered up to the gods. Of course, each
one of these people will believe that
he is wholly individual. They will
point, with great superiority, to types
among their comnaniom, but no ono
shall over stop to do a little self-
analysis.
Under Sec: In short, a people complacent and patronizing. Everyone
shall be in his own estimation, a self-
made monumen*. to the glory of his
god. They Shall always think of
each other—"Thd poor fool''; but they
will all be poor fools, though thoy
can never realize it. fools—because
they arc born, and because they must
die.
Secretary: Good Lord, there is only
half an hour before lunch, and tho
correspondence for the Junior God
is not nearly finished. We'll have
to let that other thing go till tomorrow.
Then tho two angels slowly turn
their seats until they ara once again
baek to back, and they icsume their
busy scribbling.
as the curtain falls.
Epitomie:
And so
In six days
The gods made heaven and earth
And all that is therein.
—Reg. J.
RICHARDS STREET
Questing, hungry little faces,
Hands and knees begrimed with filth,
Potential talent of the race
A wealth, to be the fear of wealth.
—Alice Grahame,
"Stephanie,'' she repeated tentatively, and wondered 3t the curious
sound. It waa tiring; nicer simply
to look down on the undulating pool
of green treelops and fancy oneself
floating in thorn. In thc midst of silence and waving stillness. Close
one's eyes and sink in ii.
A different sound. Automatically
she turned her head to the door. It
was opening and sho stopped the
repetition of "Stephanie' in surprise.
It was u man and his face made her
sad, because it was sad, too. He was
closing tne door behind him, and
coming so slowly toward her, almost
as if he didi.'i want to come. w
"Stephanie", ho said. That was
odd. Somewnore she hrd heard it
before. Eut sne could only widen
her eyes anu be so sony, so sorry
for his sadness.
"Do yoj renumber . . ." he began
as though ho didn't w.mt to say it.
She mus* Ivclp him. His sadness,
"Stcphanij," she said, tentatively.
Why—it had helped l><rn.
"And Richard,'' ho said Ircathlcssly.
She could only gaze, because he
was almost happy.
"Richie," sho hesitated. What did
it mean? Bit now he was radiant.
"You didn't jump, Stcihanie?" It
was an odd question. And that queer
voice which happened when she
moved her lips lcpeatod;
"Didn't jump."
Could t!ia\ voice really transform
his face so.' Eut his voice went on,
unwillingly, t crsistently, again.
"When we stood on the tower, it
was so <vi*.. You wanted -Stephanio.
What did you want? Remember."
He was pleading for smethlng. His
face wa3 almost unhappy again.
And tho-; queer voice fa'.d such an
odd sounding phrase from her own
lips. Hesitantly but dist:nctly . . .
"Ice-cream cone "
His face was rippling with joy now.
"Stephen!i. You do remember.
We'll start from ihcre. An ice-cream
cone." That odd phrase again.
And tha <4uecr voice repeated so
decidedly hu very phras? . . .
"Ice-cream cone."
"Now?" he said eagerly She could
only widen her eyes at him, and hab!
smile because he was sc happy.
But he was gong—an3 so quickly.
She turned her head toward the
window. The undulating pool of
green trw tops. She closed her eyes
and floated in thc silent green. Something hippy. What? Something happy
—just beyond her reach over the
green pool. Sink in 'hi pool. Don't
think. Happy.
A noise. Her head turned toward ,
the opening door. It was e. man. His
face was happy. What was in hia
hand? It had o white top and whiteness was rolling off it. Three drops
splashed oa thc grey carpet. She
looked at him so hard,
"Stephini\" the quco.- voice said.
He was holding it out to her and
sho drew back frightened. Why the
happinca wi>s gone.
"You don't iemember, Stephanie."
It wasn't i« question. Jtist a fact
brimming with sadness. .But he was
gone with his sadness.
Her head turned toward the win- •
dow. The green pool undulated but
there was unhappincss above it now.
She looked at thc carpet on the floor.
What queer white spots en the grey.
She readied for the unhappincss. It
was just beyond her grasp.
Sink Into the green pool. Waving"
stillness. Perhaps soma time she
would und*] stand what wa* above it.
Perhaps it would alway.i be such
green pea-stillness.
, Relax in the pool. Waving stillness.'
—Nancy Miles.
Translations From
Catullus
My ship, good friends, to you declares
That she of ships hath been most
swift,
Past any craft triumphant fares,
And flics by sail or oar through rift
Of foaming seas—throug'i Adriatic's
Engulfing billows. Cyclados Isles,
And far-famed Rhodes, and grim
Propontis,
And the horror of the Black Sea's
miles
Of treacherous shore—o'er every lea!
"To think," she sighs, "that long ago
On Pontic's slopes a shapely tree
I stood, while murmur3 soft and low
Came whispering through my rustling
leaves.
Amastris and Cytorus too
My trusted friends have been, and
breathes
Amid the box-trees there some few
Of youth's proud memories, as with
bow
Fresh hewn I sailed in the shining
dawn;
And thence through storm-tossed seas
my prow
Hath bravely homo my master on!
To port or starboard, it mattered not
To me how bicei.es blew, nor were
My prayers ascending breathed to the
god
Of the shore, when last I journeyed
home."
All this a tale of the greying past;
In peace my veteran ship grows old;
And dedicates herself at last
To thee, O Casto.-, and lo Pollux bold.
—Clare Brown.
From "Sonnets
For Marion" •
MARKET
Cold slabs of fish on marble trays,
Dead wet fish with blank sight
And,moveless fins—you arc clean,
But you aro not bright, and the keen
Cool metal of your coats of mail
Is dulled in death; no lustrous scale
Flashing casts back stray shafts of
light
Through green and weeded ways.
Blades crumble into rotten dust.
That once had polisliW sheen, ice-
blue;
And on your breathing armour too,
Death has bedabbled blots of rust.
-E. L. G.
I wish my Muse could compass all
the ways
All seas, all songs, all sweetness,
everything,
That you might for a fleeting moment
gaze
Upon what gifts your beggar love
would bring,
For I would sing them all, and
though you'd keep
'But muted memories half-understood
Yet you should know, feel, waking
or asleep
That lov.', and dream iU deepness, for
I would
Bring roses, rose3 to your arms; above
Your features fab*, about; your brow, '
a band
Of jade from sleepy summer seas; for
love
As pledge, a ring to wear upon your
hand:
The rimmed moon's rim, set, mid
chasing fine,
Within a night lagoon, with one star,
argentine.
You were some lovely Greek of
history ., ,
Most fair and pure and hind and tall
and true
Clothod rich in sacred maiden dignity,
And wonderful to call an army forth,
And I—a rude barbarian of the north
Who in his random rovings chanced
to be
Short staying with tha Greeks, and
found in you
A goddess to receive his fealty.
If that was twice a thousand years
ago
The Hours had spared my love,
unchanged as life,
And Time, red-rampant, laying ages
low
Has failed to hurt It In the wearing
strife:
To-day 1 worship you, a.* some earth-
fire
Unceasingly, might to a star aspire.
-G. K.
BRIEF LAMENT
Wc were twain, nnd now are two;
I am I and you are you
Who were we. Ah, bitter pain
That wc are two who once were
twain.
-N. W,
FRAGMENT
You held my heart, wLh soft
caresses woke
The fragile thing to life. Then for
a joke
You gave if just a playful twist or
two-
It broke.
-N. W. Mm-
"C,
Pagt Four
THE UBYSSEY
Tuesday, February 28,193$]
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When I was a boy 1 loved good,
clean sport, and I take you back now
to the place of my birth and the time
when I was ten , . .
The autumn rains change the river
from green to grey and then to turbid yellow. Up the muddy current
slink dim, grey shapei—the dog salmon, outcast of fish. They spawn
and die. The sea-gulls peck'their
eyes out.
They come in by thousands, both
the fish and the birds. And in the
upper waters the salmon lay their
eggs, and grow stiff from exhaustion,
and slimy with green mucus, and
lie like rotten logs under the bank,
and die. And the sea-gulls scream
in triumph. The freshness of tho sea
drops away from them. Their trim
feathers grow rugged end yellow;
they become fat, obscene beasts of
birds.
But little we care for this. The
birds and the fish are our signal for
fun. Every normal little boy and a
great many lomboyish little girls
hurry to get ready for "dogger-spearing." Some of us havo spears; the
rest steal the garden pitchfork. We
nearly all manage to get gum-boots,
and I wear my father's canvas fishing wadvrs, which reach to my armpits.
Thui armed and accoutred, we sally forth to the shallow streams and
sloughs created by the river's overflow upon the bars. And there dorsal fins rippling through the water
show where fish fight their way up
' the rapids. Out we wade to meet
them, two or three of us toge.her,
trying to surround a salmon and
force him to run the gauntlet ot our
spears. The downstream man has the
place af honour, for usually the cornered "dogger" puts tho speed of the
current behind him.
The rocks are slippery and the
water swift We poise our spears
and wade out with beating hearts,
not just sure how brave we'll be
when thirty pounds of desperate energy comes torpedoing towards us.
The fish fights the current like a
• grey ghost, his belly brushing the
boulders, his back almost above the
surface. He knows wj're after him,
but he still hopes to get into deep
water above. No! Watch out! He's
coming! *
A pause, a drifting 3ideways, then
a swirl, and he shoots downstream
Wigwam, 1934
"You've got just fiva minutes before your act Joe,"
"1 shall be ready presently," the
Indian chief replied in hie usual correct English. "Won't you come in
and wait?" Ho opened the door and
I entered the temporary living quarters of our "Show's" Indian tribe.
The one room was vory large but
nevertheless hardly largo enough for
the seventeen people who lived in
it. I immediately became aware of
the cha'acteristic, sweaty smell of
the Redskin. Its source was apparently in the dirty straw mattresses
which were strewn haphazardly on
the floor. On each mattress, rolled
in a bundle, was either an old worn-
out overcoat or a tattered blanket.
A great black pot filled with a
stew of some sort was simmering on
two rusty gas rings whose base was
a rather unsteady apple-box. This
whole very unromantic campfire
threatened to collapse at any moment.
Sitting cross-legged b»side it and
watching tho pot as if it contained
some horrible charm, old Chitish muttered away to herself, every little
while glancing furtively in my direction.
Elaborate feathered costumes hung
on nails about the walls. Huge masks
and ceremonial headge.trs littered an
unpainted table at ono end of the
room. Directly opposite an immense
bear's head with big glas3 eyes stared
at me from its precarious position
over the window
Suddenly little Toketio, the chief's
four-year old daughter, unrolled herself from one of thel blanket bundles,
tossing back her thick black hair
from her eyes and lifted her pretty
face and smiled at me.
"Hullo," she .said. Then with a
laugh she turned and .".crumbled into
her father's arms, kissing him as he
bent to bid her goodbye.
—Frank Miller
like a slippery, wriggling submarine.
We step back; there is something too
terrible in that lightning rush. But
all he wants is to get past, and as
he goes wo strike.
"Got him! Hey, kid?, quick; help
me pull him' ashore. He's nearly
tearing the spear out of my hands.
Ouf, look at the brute splosh! Quick."
But they aiv not quick enough.
Suddenly there is nothing on the
spear. A ripplo goes downstream too
fast to follow. The fisii is gone.
Well, we decide it's no fun spearing in the rapids, anyway. Too many
get away. Better try the banks,
where we can get a fair rhot.
Taking cover behind como bushes,
we sneak up to a shallow cut bank.
A somnolent, hump-backed monster
is lying there. An easy shot. We
can't miss, unless we ecure him, He's
half dead anyway.
But he's still got fight in him. Yes,
slree. He writhes and splashes and
splashes, churns the river to foam
with his tail, dyes it red with his
blood. But thc barbs of the spear
hold good and wc drag him to shore.
We place our foot on him and wrench
out the spear, but we don't dare put
our hand close to that snapping,
hooked mouth. We are afraid of him,
so wc kick his lacerated tide to show
we are not, and we shout and go
away. And '.he snapping of' his jaw
grows slower, &nd his gasps grow
louder, and the sea-gulls gather
round . ..
When I was a boy I loved good,
clean sport.
—Gerald Prevost.
CLIFF MOONLIGHT
The moon smiles kindly from his full
round face.
The air hangs still, steeped with a
summer fragrance
Warm. No sound bre.iki the night,
save the night-hawk's wings,
Whirring in check of sudden swoop;
he spies
A fly &warm, tender morsel for his
gullet.
Above the firs tower, silent sentinels
Against the stars. Away below the
sea,
Quiet and dark swells gently, laving
the shore
With wavelets, (listening crystals in
tho moon's
Pale beams. But look out there upon
the bosom
Of the deep: a myriad dancing lights
aro ranged
In artless symnetry: th« fishermen
Await their prey with cruel lowered
nets.
Through their small craft a stately
liner picks
Her way, her decks ond portholes all
alight-
But nature still surpasses. At the
cliff's edge,
Behold that crooked maple, hanging,
clinging
To the sandy scarp; its twisted
shadows play
Fantastic on th_» whito cliff face;
glimpsed through
Its boughs a tongue of silver foam
translucent,
Darting from the ocean dark to feci
The beach again and pebbles grating
there.
The warm air stirs, a cool breeze
quickens off
The water; my face it wakens; I am
roused
By its soft caresses to sweet ecstasy:
How wonderful it is to be alive
And breathe: how vast yet fine the
work? of God.
-E. M.
AfTEE RENUNCIATION
. .. breathless you were,
and your eyes levely; with
your hands at your throat. . . '
dream then ...
dream cf loveliness.
But never yours,
never the fulfilment, the reality.
I must go apart
now and build my house; a
fmall house, witn
heavy wulls.
Taking with me
such things—violets,
and forgotten moonlight—
nor remembering
their death
There
I shall be alone . .
But there are flowers
growing, and
a quiet time . . .
dream then ...
dream of loveliness.
But never yours,
never the ful-
filment, the reality.
—Reg. J.
The Prairies
To one who has lived for the
greater part of his life on the Pacific
Coast surrounded by friendly mountains, the prairies seem like an empty
house stripped of familiar furnishings—a vast mansion unoccupied by
human kind.
It was very early in May, when all
life seems to have fled; when not
even the song of a bird u> heard, that
I arrived at my destination. The icy
chill of winter still lingered in the
air. The grey, sullen fky seemed
hqavy overhead.
Extending in every direction lay
rolling fields between the clumps of
brush. Some o* tho fields were
black, others were covered with stubble. In the distance could be seen
tho lakes, bleak and threatening, reflecting the mood of earth and sky.
-R. T. W.
Gourmand
The old fat lady sat at the head of
the table. Her .'leek yellowish-white
hair was piled high on the top of
her head. Her small pig-eyes looked
blankly in front of l.ei. A large
fleshy nose with a hook curve thrust
itself out from her face. The ruptured veins of her nosa and upper
lip stood out purple against the grey
pitted skin of her face.
The thick lower lip hun.? loose, disclosing a row of stump teeth. The
fat of her body drooped heavily onto
tho chair.
She gazed down at the demolished
fowl before her, then smiled and,
taking her crutches, attempted to rise.
—Frank Miller.
TOIL
Thc sun whoso glad royi shone nil
day
In burning splendour,
Now sinks to rest, a flaming ray
Of rosy grandeur.
Twilight falls, &rd o'er the earth
Peace gently hovers;
While to the south a new day's birth
Awakes our brothers.
For them a task is not begun:
From north to south
Toil never ceases; one sleeps, and one
Presses oni to truth.
—Clare Brown.
FINALE
The ash-tree'stands
On the faded lawn,
Its empty hands
Fingering the strands
Of dove-grey rain
Spun out of the dawn.
Are the birds fled
That it stands alone
And deserted?
Where are tho wings sped
Into the rain?
For thc tree makes moan.
—E. Garrett.
In the vein of the Reverend Herrick,
Wit/t due obeisance to his shade.
"To Julia on, first seeing her in
'pants',"
Wheneas ln*&lacka my Julia goes,
Then, then, mcthinks she surely
shows ,
No groat discretion in her clothes.
(For, darling, soto it gricveth me
That one so fair and shapely
Be clad with such grotcscjiicric). ,
Not even Hebe'?, hips wv.rc fair,
If she, despite of Jove, should daio
To hang such graceless parments
there.
-a. k.
PRINCESS LOUISA INLET
We lay on the deck and laughed.
The night was done, that awful night
Of flame and terror in tho dark.
The scorched i.iilow at your feet
Remembered It more than you,
For your cye3 were full of sunrise
And your ears heard tho gurgling
tide, *
Your heart wa3 in the mountains
And you wers the sen-king's bride.
You smiled a little and said:
"When I am rich and have my way,
'Tis hero that I'll abide,
Here where tha iushin3 streamlets
Spring from the glacier's side,
Here where the calm blue waters
Mirror the rea-gull's glide."
I laughed at you first, but then
The sun shono on the mountainside,
The mists rose up, the vision came.
I saw it all, your house of pride,
The cabin of logs and bark,
The path that boulders divide,
The waterfall behind it,
The wild rose climbing beside.
It was sweet, it was siri<:>le;
Though a prince might deride,
I had seen, I had felt,
And I was satisfied,
"Let mo liws hero with you," I cried.
—Gerald Prevost.
THE ELIZABETHANS
Like a strong flame
New-lit and fiercely burning,
Not without smoke
Yet clear and leaping swiftly
Shines their work in tnis dull age of
ours.
Even he who cried to maids
To gather rose-buds while they might,
And sang thc flight of time—
The brevity of life,
Felt not those buds to Le
The shadow of an unrcolity
And sighed not bitterly
That life was very long.
Strong was the urge
For men' to live then strongly
And wider the scope
Of life to all men offered
To men undullcd by life's satiety.
-P. C.
Challenge the birds to fly beyond the
dawn,
To flush their wing-tips with its
mystic hues,
To trope where thought and fancy
swiftly borne
Awako the shimmer of a distant sea.
Dare with the fish the farthest depths
to find,
Where lh;ht lies dead among the
oozy dalc.i—
Drive forth your fancici from the
fold of wind
To pasfure on the downs of other
work's!
-P. C l
A BALLAD
The storm is fierce and the night is
long,
But Mabel is faithful and true,
Though witches sing their strange,
weird song,
"Go home, lest the gobiins get you!"
Through the wind and the hail,
through *the teeth of the gale,
Through the scream of tho night and
the tree-tops wail.
"Why stand you here in the rain and
snow, *
Fair maid, with your hoir like gold?"
"Good sir, 1 stand that none may go
O'er this bridge so frail and old."
But tho wind's blast 's chill, and the
night darkens still,
When brave Mabel sets a light on the
top of a hill.
"No one will come on a night so ill
To cross thc ok', bridge, fair maid:
Then come with me to yon sunlit
Hill—
A. crown on your head will bo laid!"
"In tho wind and thc hail, in the
teeth of the gale,
In this place will I stay, though the
tree-tops wail."
The witches and goblins good Mabel
to scare
Are threatening with death or worse,
But Mabel well knows that her duty
is thore^
Though witches and goblins may
curse-
Far away in the night, horses' hoof-
beats alight
And two noble riders now gallop in
sight.
Tho prince has icined hi: steed and
seen
Who stopped his wild death ride;
He has posted h:s man where Mabel
had been,
Now he carries her off as his bride,
Tlirough tho wind and thc hail,
through the teeth cf tho gale,
Through tho scream of the night, and
the tree-tops wail.
—Hugh Herbison.
DREAM
and you laughing and smiling
and fading and
fading
and you turning and
waving me farewell
waving mo
and you seeking and
clasping another hand
and seeing all this and
the remembrance of it
freezing within mc
and ono bitter cry
and no more ... '
and peace coming with
the warm ocean that
rose and carried mo away
and nil my weariness
falling from ine
and the gentle and the lovely
depth folding about m.1
—Reg. J.
Church Scene
The stern-faced cleric climbed decisively up tho steps Uv.o the pulpit.
He hod an announcement to make.
The hasty departures from'church
before the end of the service were
becoming too numerous They were
both unmannerly and unseemly. The
matter was serious. If they continued, something would have to be
done about it. Ho himself would do
it.
The faces of the congregation were
non-committal, as faces are in
church. A few expressed sympathy.
Several younger members openly
grinned.
Toward the close of the hour, there
was tho usual clatter and scraping of
those endeavouring to ninko an unobtrusive exit. But they encountered
an, obstacle. In the centre of the
middle aisle stood the rector. The
crowd milled about uncertainly. He
regarded his flock with marked coldness. '
One little man detached himself
from thc rest and ambloci hurriedly
forward. "Anti-fieeze," he whispered anxiously, "I have no antifreeze in my car. It might freeze."
"You may go," his pnstcr said distantly.
Another man bustled toward him.
Ho was one of the heaviest contributors in the community, and if that
other little man could get out, then
he . . . But he felt slighlty ridiculous.
It had been a long time since he had
made excuses to teacher.
He bent to the clerical car: "Err—I
have an appointment. I- that is—my
wife is having breakfast downtown
with me, and . . ."
"Very well," said his spiritual advisor. The man walked off importantly.
Several women, taking advantage
of the fact that they were women
and therefore privileged, passed by
on his other side.
He looked over to the stalwart
young ushers. They evinced a sudden and absorbed Interest In the altar. After all, the tactics of the football field—the formation of a defence
line—could hardly be used in church.
Moreover, they realized, In some obscure way, tha: religion was become
a poor thing when the fear of the
Lord was replaced by the fear of the
ushers.
The church was emp'ying rapidly
now. It was only two minutes to the
hour. One man of exceptional politeness paused ir> passing the rector
to give his excuse.
"I. uh . . ."
"Go!" barked the disgusted cleric,
and turned abiuptly in letreat.
—Catherine MacRae.
Tita
DEUTSCH
If English sometimes sounds absurd,
And vocal groans are oft-times rieard
When syllables are ripped and slurred
It softens with a touch.
But German clings to gutt'ral sound
And smooth French forms are seldom
found;
A hopeless mixture all around,
It sure gets you in Deutsch.
To "sprcchen Deutsch" I'd thought be
smart;
I knew six words right from the start;
"Dor Funk" to loarn buined in my
heart
And held mo in its clutch.
"Die Wficht am Rhine" was Deutsch
to mc,
And "Goethe" I'd learned wrote
"Pocsie"
"Jawohl" ... I soon began to see,
And, eloquent, went Deutsch,
With "Weineia" and "Limberger
cheese"
And "Pumpernickel" if you please,
I spouted Deutsch with style and
ease,
ii
Enraptured very much.
My first essay was something neat;
'Gross" words I used, right hard to
beat;
^ wrote with native skill—a treat—
A masterpiece in Deutsch.
I signed my name with rride and joy;
"Nicht mchr" n "dummer' little boy.
My prof would learn I was no toy,
Or bunny in a hutch,
My marks . . . oh well, I must
forget ...
From pain I whimper yrt and fret;
Such red ink blurs adorned my pet,
My "Schon" essay in Deutsch.
My "schmerz" is deep, my head feels
bumped;
And Deutsch has made mo badly
humped,
"Ach Himmel, ja!" I know I'm
stumped;
For mo, Deutsch still is Dutch.
—G. F. Johnson.
Every morning except Sunday the
door of 713 Laburnum opened at precisely 7:30 to emit the neat derby,
crowned figure of Mr. Benson. Tad
Incident was so regular that many «(
the neighbors had be^im to wake
their children with the words, "Mr.
Benson has gono to work, it's tin*
to get up and got ready for school"
Beyond the fact that for the last
twenty years he'd left'V 7:30 aa
and returned at 6:30 p.m. and that
in all possibility he would do tht
same thing for the next twenty yean,
the neighbors knew nothing of Mr.
Benson.
He was one of those quiet, inoffensive men, below th* overdue Ia
height end possibly in intelligence,
who seemed doomed to failure and
loneliness. A man with few word*
and too shy to use those he possessed
His fellow emplyoees found it impossible to know him any better than
his neighbors.
An object of pity you might say
but you would be. wrong. It is true
that Mr. Benson remembered a time,
twelve long years ago, when he had
felt a dreadful loneliness blotting him
out; but that was beforo Tita had
come into his life. Sweet, merry little Tital
What a companion she was! He
remembered the first time he saw
her, alone on a street corner with
the rain beating upon her, bedraggled
and wet but so small and helpless;
her big gray ey.es begging for love
and kindness.
Mr. Benson bad large unused supplies of love and of kindness all of
which he lavished on Tita and she
repayed his affection with interest.
The door of 713 Laburnum Street
concealed the happiest home on the
street. No harsh word1? cr even resentful silences marred its quiet bliss.
True Tita wa3 unable to assist him
with any, of the housework and her
presence made perhap3 more work
for him. But every evening he was
greeted by a small joyful figure who
showered him with caresses. In thc
morning he was bidden goodbye with
similar caresses. Wasn't that as much
as any man could expect'
Such was Mr. Benson's life till a
fateful day In early April. A beautiful Spring day when the whole
world rejoiced, that is to say the
whole world, except M.\ Benson. He
was for the first time in his life a
quarter of an hcur late. Tita was
not well. Sho had scarcely eaten
last night and this morning she had
been unable to accompany him even
to the door. He had wanted to stay
with her but hh emplcyers were
hard and work vas scarce for a man
of his age. Still, what did work, what
did anything tedly matter besides
Tita!
A sense of disaster hung over him
the whole long day and it seemed
eons before he could at last hurry
back to 713 Laburnum street and
Tita. His fears became heavier when
for the first time in twelve years no
little feet ran to greet him at the
door.
He found her in thc di awing room
before the fire. Her little head lying
on her feet, her body <.•"> soft and relaxed. Fearfully he moved closer and
touched her. Tita was ocad. Never
more to fee) her soft body against his!
Never more to hear her !ow contented purr as she rubbed herself against
his legs in greeting. It seemed more
than he could bear. As one dead
himself Mr. Benson lay on the floor
beside his lost Tita.
Yet next morning at precisely 7:30
a.m. Mr. Benson left 113 Laburnum
street, ;m older, lonelier Mr. Benson,
though tho neighbors noticed no
change.
- Zoe Crown Clayton
CHRISTMAS FEAST
They sat s
stuffing their grcss bodies
with food, and swilling
wine;
gorging, pig-liko
in memory of a clirist
who died.
The stranger
came to the table,
raised
a cup of wine.
Flickering candles
cast on the wall behind
a shadow of
capering Pan.
"Gcntlemci i
to Judas Iscarlot"
They paused
for a moment,
then went on eating.
-Reg J Tuesday, February 26, 1935
THE UBYSSEY
Page Five
Zoo Student
Likes Snakes
Do you like rattlesnakes for pets?
Or would you rather keep a harmless
Crotalus Oreganus? Stop before you
answer, because George Holland,
who should know, tells us that they
are both the same thing.
George is a Zoology student, and
has a small collection of Interesting
"pets." Among them is Alexander,
the Crotalus Oreganus, or just plain
Pacific Rattlesnake. Personally we
saw nothing pacific about Alexander,
particularly when we tried to take
a picture of him. The picture isn't
reproduced here because the camera
was shaking too much to do the job
properly. Alex posed beautifully, and
looked the camera ln the eye, but
the cameraman was busy elsewhere,
looking at Margaret.
Margaret is another of George Holland's pets. Hftr fancy name Is Tes-
tudo Iberia, but we call her an African Land-tortoise—George was very
emphatic on tho point that Margaret
was a tortoise, not a turtle. She
spends her time in the Zoo lab, hidden away in a drawer of test tubes,
along with another of the same breed.
We took the tortoise outside for
some air. She demonstrated her remarkable speed by covering ten feet
In fifteen minutes flat. It was animals like Margaret that inspired the
legend of the "hare and the tortoise."
Both the snake and the tortoise are
pets of George. He keeps them "just
for fun." The snake was given to
hmi by Professor Spencer, and is at
present very yovng. It eats at intervals of several weeks, and is growing
very slowly. According to George it
will soms day be two or three feet
in length. In the meantime Alex
rests in a glass box and rattles all
day.—D. R. B.
(
Your Nearest Bank is
The Canadian
Bank of
Commerce
Tenth and Sasamat Branch
A general banking business is transacted, and accounts of the Faculty and
Students of The University of British Columbia
are welcomed.
? JOKES ?
'Member when corn plaster ads just
showed the foot?
• * •
Country road, the car faltered and
then stopped.
He: "Outta gas."
She: "Oh, yeah?" (produces flask
from somewhere).
He: "Ah-ha, what's in that flask?"
She: "Gasoline."
• * •
Winter is a season when you keep
the home as hot as it was in summer when you kicked about it.
» • •
The minister had just married an
elderly and rather dour Scot to a
woman considerably younger, and
after the ceremony he remarked to
the bridegroom, "Well, Mcpherson,
you'll be going on a honeymoon
now?"
"Honeymoon?" echoed Mac. What's
that?"
"Oh, you know," laughed the clergyman. "A little trip somewhere together before you settle down in
married life."
The bridegroom shook his head
morosely. "A na!" he said, "I dinna
hold wl' galllvantin' aboot wi' a
strange wumman."
• * •
A fresh argument for nudism is
that it narrows the field of investigation for a lost railway ticket.
• • *
Science '35—Do you object to kissing?
Bright Young Thing—That's something I've never done.
S. '35-Kissed' '
B. Y. T.: Objected.
• • •
Here are a tew perplexing questions
that are being asked now that the
co-ed Is approaching:
1. How should I accept an invitation
when a girl asks me to go to the
co-ed with her'
2. What should I say when a co-ed
asks me for a dance?
3. What should I say when a co-ed
cuts in on a dance?
4. What should I say if a co-ed asks
me to sit out a dance with her?
5. Should I let her hold my hand?
6. Should I ask her in when she
takes me home?
7. Should I let her kiss me when
she says good-bye?
And so on, far, far into the night.
• • •
Epitaph
Little Alice now is dead,
To her a toast we quaffed,
Someone slugged her on the head
Because she laughed, and laughed,
and laughed.
fEATlIE*
BANKERS TO THE
ALMA MATER
SOCIETY
C. R. Myers, Manager
NOTICE
There will be a meeting of the
Literary Forum today (Tuesday)
noon, at 12:15 sharp, in Arts 105. Will
all members please attend—without
lunches!
PLAYERS' TOUR MAY
BE REVIVED
Club Member Tells of Adventures on Past
Tours
The Players' Club tour! The acme of desire for all members of the club, the envy of all non-members, the closest link
between the University and the outlying parts of British Columbia! The Players' Club tour!
The tour began in the club's first year, 1915-16, with visits
to Victoria and New Westminster at the request of the late
President Wesbrook. In 1920 the club ventured into the Okanagan, in 1922 into the Kootenays. In 1931 the tour reached its
zenith with 25 performances.
Altogether, 26 towns In British Columbia have enjoyed the University
players, and local charitable organizations have benefited by the profits
made in sponsoring them.
It's a hard, hard grind, but whnt
fun a bunch of kids can mix with Itl
There was that evening at Vernon
when the pyjamas of two loving
couples were tied together and run
It was a great event for the players up the hotel flag-pole, and that time
to come to town, and royal entertain- , at Penticton when some of the boys
F. L. ANSCOMBE
TAILOR
Dry Cleaning and Pressing
Alterations and Repairs
4465 W. 10th Elliott 1540
We Call and Deliver
fcaehmaked uie oiwi
douhlu awcwuL.
JERSEY MILK CHOCOLATE
FINEST ROASTED FILBERTS
ments were planned for them. The
1920 cast, for instance, will never forget their first arrival at Penticton.
Disembarking from the lake steamer,
they found the front of the Incola
Hotel a fairyland of coloured lights,
the lobby gay with university colours, and all the town come to do
them honour at a dance.
And later casts will not forget a
different approach to the same hotel
—the launch trip down from Summerland about 1 a.m., with the scenery piled on the cabin roof, a moon
beaming down, a guitar tinkling,
laughter and song. What romance!
It's a pity statistics have never been
kept on the mirriages resulting from
tour.
Late Hours
Well, it is the greatest fun on earth
and also the hardest work. Weary,
sooty hours on the train, an afternoon spent struggling with recalcitrant scenery and lights while the
girls iron endless costumes, a hurried
supper, then back to the theatre for
make-up, then the performance, then
the thankless job of repacking, then
a crowded reception at somebody's
home, and then bed, anywhere be-
went swimming, au naturel, in the
dark, and someone — could it have
been the girls'' -sneaked their clothes
across the road and deposited them
plump under u light on XIf hotel
verandah.
Friendships Formed
Altogether, the casts get to know
one another pretty well—eipecially in
the numerous theatres that have
only one dressing room /or both sexes! 'Tis an honest saying that no one
ever came back from tour a prude.
The grandest thing abou* tour is
the friendships that it makes—friends
of the University all ovi.. the province, and friends among tho cast who
will be held *ogether for ever by
memories of what will v«*v likely be
the happiest time of their lives.
The tour makes troupers too; it
takes ordinal y actors and turns them
into troupers. A trouper's a pal you
can count on; he'll take thc bumps
with you and keep on {.'riling; he
knows the thenlre back•.",•.)ci: and
front; and hes infected with that
crazy virus that rnnkes p-n,./a dream
and scheme and work theusclves to
death for the P'ayer's C1jt
And that is w iy the Play v s Club
tween 1 and 2 a.m. Try that for wants to renew is it's tour this year.
two weeks!
GERALD PREVOST
Echoes Of
Education
Now that tho nightmarish Arts '20
road race and the second practice
teaching week in the high schools
are off the bocks, we can sit back,
perhaps close our «yes, and dream
of what we've heard in recent lectures.
Was it not our Jennie who said:
'/Believe me, Franzen was a man with
a technique."
And did not the inimitable Sedgewick admit that his "name's not only
middle class—it's of extremely low
class," but that he didn't "care a
**!&*!!".
Usthinks, too, it was he (St. Peter
wouldn't let US In, children) who
confided that He knew "some potent women teachers," and told us
the story of the Cockney nurse who
always "took out the baiby for an
hering in the morning."
Sure, sure.
And one day he was so crabby he
offered this mother of pearl: "The
winds and the waves obeyed him,
and, lo, there was a great clam."
Then we seem to remember also a
certain non-biblical David waking up
In the lecture room, and whispering
ghost-like to his neighbor: "Gosh, I
dreamt I was teaching then,"
Why, we can tven picture how the
bright specimen commonly called
Saul meekly venturing in a methods
class: "In 1741 Behring sailed through
a strait now Behring his name,"
ptavjress
depends on private enterprise, particularly of publlo
utility companies. The B. C.
Electric has Invested scores
of millions In this province,
which has helped develop It
aa a home for its present
citizens.
BRITISH COLUMBIA ELECTRIC
RAILWAY COMPANY LIMITED
NOTICE
The time has come for all
good, and bad poets to come
to the aid of the Feature Editor.
Each year about the time
when the Scieneemen's fancy
lightly turns to thoughts of
Arts women, the Ubyssey publishes thv! Annual affliction of
Spring Pottery.
Now spring pottery doesn't
grow on shoe trees so the Feature Editor expects everyone
to do his duty. The page will
appear next Tuesday, Go into the woods, pick yourself a
dandelion, sit down by the
side of the canyon and write
us a poem.
JLNICR
PCCM
MAR. 7, SPANISH GRILL
The LAST
and BEST
9:00 - 1:00 $2.00 Couple
HIRAM
HITS TOWN
Dear Anny:
I hope you see as how I'm calling
you by your new name. I landed up
in Vancouver abcut a week back and
imejittly went to see that there smart
alick who put your letter in the paper. He was so gol darned nice to
me and told mc so many nice lies
about how your letter came to be
printed that I've went and got me a
job werking fer him. It looks like
a soft job to roe, all I've got to do is
to watch what people are doing here
and write and tell you about it. What
he gets out of it I don't know, but
he said for me to give him the letters to give you and I get a meal in
a ellegant resturunt (the Cafeteria,
maybe you've heard about it.)
Anyway we went down and drunk
a couple of cups of brown stuff from
a big silver tank and in a few minutes all the lights went out. When
they came on again I was all alone
and I found that all the doors were
locked. I heard singing coming from
up above bo after a wile I found a
door that was open and I went upstairs to see who was making all the
noise. I opened a door and saw a
big room full of people so I snuck
in soft like and set in a cheer like
in a theayter and ahure enough there
was a show going on. The people
on the platform must of been strangers on account of they had on funny
clothes like I ain't seen before, but
they sure could sing. I aint never
heard nothing like it before.
I was skeered for one young feller
in a green coat that was arguin a
ghost into being alive again and as
I ain't one for digging up the passed,
I felt sort of oneasy for a while. It
was a good show alright alright but
theys two things Id like to know. 1.
Whose diory was Miss Rose Maybud
reading out all them orders from
cause they 3ure must have been
around. 2. There was a fellow standing up in front of the band shaking
a little stick at them, and I noted lots
of times when they started a new
song that the band and the singers
and the fellow all started together,
what beata me Is, how does he know
when theyre goin to start? It beats
me.
Love from your own
Hiram.
KNIGHTHOOD
IN FLOWER
Prominent Pepster Trapped In
Tin
Knighthood flowered again Friday
morning when Pepster DePoe persuaded three cronies to help him into
the suit of armour used in "Ruddigore." But knighthood went quickly
to seed again when Sir Norman's esquires basely deserted him and he
found he could not raise his arms
higher than his shoulders. "What
felony is this!" roared the knight from
the tinny depth3 of his burgonet, as
he struggled vainly to reach the visor which had been rammed down
into battle position. "Come back, ye
scurvy varlets! Poltroons! By the
stomach of the Pope I trow I will
make your empty costards ring till
Michaelmas, an ye do not release me
forthwith!" But his cries were answered only by the slamming of distant doors, and while the knight
would fain have pursued the rogues,
he feared the disturbance that would
be aroused by the appearance of an
armed man In the quad. Therefore
he retired to the darkest corner back
stage to meditate.
It was here that a band of pubsters
discovered him ten minutes later,
minus helmet and shield, but still
struggling vainly to reach the buckles of bis corselet, vaunt-braces, and
cuisses.—K. G.
ECCI
CEV|EW
By T. Murray Hunter
A land of light and shadows—where
the beauty of the pastoral countryside is contrasted with the squalor
of the Industrial city—Is the picture
drawn by the celebrated author, J.
B. Priestley, in his latest work entitled: English Journey. It is a book
that is undoubtedly best summarized
by the writer himself—as "a rambling but truthful account of what one
man saw and heard and felt and
thought during a journey through
England during the autumn of the
year 1933."
Perhaps the most outstanding feature of the book is Priestley's conversational style—a style that, for better
or for worse, is intensely personal.
Thus, there is a never ending stream
of anecdotes, character sketches and
observations that sweeps the reader
along with the current of the author's thoughts and feelings.
But English Journey must not be
taken as merely the autobiography
of a gifted author. Through his eyes
we catch the vision of a new England—the modern England of the
twentieth century. And there is
much good and much evil in this
land, as depicted by an impartial
writer.
From the Cotswolds to the Black
Country, and from there to the West
Riding of Yorkshire and the northeast coast, Priestley gathers a succession of strangely incongruous impressions. He frequently gives vent to a
harshly critical end even cynical expression of feeling, and he has a keen
sense of the ridiculous—so that a district in the Cotswolds receives a notable tribute from the author when he
remarks: "Thera is no Ye Olde Chipping Campden nonsense about it."
Yet it is only when viewing the deplorable living conditions of the unemployed ln tho northern Industrial
areas near Newcastle that he breathes
words of fire. His gloomy reflections
are crystallized in one solemn sentence: "If T. S. Eliot ever wants to
write a poem about a real wasteland instead of a metaphysical one,
he should corns here."
Behind all of Priestley's description
there is a rather cold, analytical Intellect striving to fathom the great
problems of life In modern England.
And there Is a predominant element
of contempt present In his work
when, in his most austere manner, he
observes: "Behind all the new movements of this age, nationalistic, fascists, communistic, has been more
than a suspicion of the mental attitude of a gang of small town louts
ready to throw a brick at the nearest
stranger."
But it would be a mistake to dismiss English Journey as a sombre
and pessimistic treatise on contemporary life in England. The book is
much too personal for that. It sparkles. The Priestley who comments so
humorously upon hotels, buses, foxhunting, saxophone-players and pubs
is no pedant—he is a man among
men. His book has a wide appeal, and
it will always be treasured by those
whose Interests are centred in the
three Englands that he has seen: the
Old, the Nineteenth Century and the
New.
English Journey, by J. B. Priestley,
London, Helnemenn-Gollancz, 1934.
Pub vs Council
Softball Today
SOFTBALL TODAY NOON
On the Soccer Field
Publications Board
vs.
Students' Council
ADMISSION FREE
Come One, Come All
Hotel Vancouver
Afternoon Tea - • 50c per Person
Every Afternoon except Sunday
Dinner Dance Wednesday Night in the
Spanish Grill, 7:30-9:30
Tea Dansant Saturday Afternoon, 4:30-5:30
Supper Dance Saturday Night in the
Spanish Grill, 9:30
Earle Hill and his Orchestra
Phone Reservation to
Maitre d'Hotel Umberto Trajella
Sey. 2111
P. E. Chester, Mgr. Page Six
THE UBYSSEY
Tuesday, February 26,1935
Adanacs Take Lead In Title Race
Soccerites Defeat
Chinese Students
Close Tilt Goes To Thunderbirds 4-3
By a score of 4-3 Varsity ousted
Chinese Students from the Mainland
Cup competition Saturday in a ragged contest at the Cambie Street
Grounds.
The game produced only Hashes of
good football. The Orientals adopted
spoiling tactics and their kick-and-
rush type of p'ny prevented the Thunderbirds from settling down. Outside of a few flashes of combination
play by the forward line, the Collegians merely took advantage of the
breaks to pile up their total.
MacDougall Scores lint
Varsity took the lead before the
game was five minutes old, MacDougall heading through on a concerted
Thunderbird raid. This completed
the scoring for the half, and Indicated the margin between respective
Studenuj.
The Blue and Gold were much superior in the second half, although
below their usual standard. They
went into a 3-0 lead when Bill Wolfe
developed sharp-shooting tendencies
to tally twice. The first came when
Kozoolin headed into the goal-mouth
and the second from Laurie Todd's
pass.
Chinese Rush Scores
With hab! an hour gone a Chinese
rush confused the Varsity defence,
and the inside-right snapped a shot
into the comer. Archie MacDougall
regained the lost advantage when he
took the ball on a poor goal-kick to
coolly drive it into the net.
Ten minutes from time another
misunderstanding permitted Quene
Yip to tally with a hard drive. In
the last minute the same player
jumped up to head a pretty goal from
a corner. Th? game ended as Varsity kicked off.
Paul Kozoolin was again the outstanding player, Munday, MacDougall and Thurber being the pick of
tho re^t. Bill Wolfe was still hampered by thc "flu'' and was forcvd out
of the game- fifteen minutes from
time, his place being taken by Will
Irish.
, The Team:
Greenwood. Quayle, Sutherland.
Thurber, Kozoolin, Stewart, Laurie
Todd, Irish, Munday, MacDougall (2),
Wolfe (2), and Davo Todd.
Whyte
Hoopsters Face
Pacific Lutheran
FOUR GAMES THIS WEEK
*-
The Varsity Basketball team has
an extremely heavy schedule to cover this week. Already having played
one game against the Adanacs in
their league playoff struggle, they
will have to face that team twice
again, unless the same team that won
last night wins again tomorrow. These
games are scheduled for Wednesday
night at Varsity and Friday in the
Royal City Arena. Friday, incidentally, is the night of the co-ed, and
several handsome members of the
team can be seen tearing their hair
out all over the campus because of
this clash in dates.
But another game to be played Saturday night in the 17.".v... gym lias
just been announced by the Students'
Council. The visitors are to be Pacific Lutheran College, one of Washington's crack college teams.
Huskies Win In
Deciding Battle
VARSITY LOSES 8 • 4
A squad of very discouraged and
weary hockey players returned to
the campus yesterday with a disheartening tale to tell. They suffered an
8-4 set-back on Friday night at the
hands of a strong University of Washington team. The win was tho deciding game of the series and by it
the Huskies gained possession of a
trophy which Varsity has held since
hockey as an inter-collegiate sport
was dropped in 1924.
The Thunderbirds sadly missed the
services of Clarence Taylor. This
classy left-winger, who is just about
the whole team, had to remain in
Vancouver to help the Vies in a playoff game. Without him, the team
never looked good for a win except
perhaps for a short time in the first
period.
Varsity Starts Well
Varsity was off to a good start on
goals by Hager and Livingstone but
the Huskies soon began to click to
even It up 2 all at the end of the
period. The Huskies were never
headed after that.
Led by their stars Harold Smith
and Doug Mavor the Maroon and
White team made it 4-2 at the end
of the second andjeoasted in ta wind
up the night's work at 8-4.
Ronnie Andrews in goal turned in
a commendable performance. Lambert and Livingstone were tho best
of the others ,
Lineups ani Summary'
U. B. C. Washington
Andrews G Reed
Burnett D Holland
Lee D Carter
Livingstone F Rcmpher
Little F Mavor
Lambert F Smith
Sanderson S Houston
Cudmore S Collier
Trussel S Litsey
Hager S » Robertson
Winkler S Black
First Period — Q) U.B.C, Hager
(Burnett), 2:35; (2) U.B.C, Livingstone 9:36; (3) U.W., Smith (Mavor),
17:25; (4) U.W., Collier (Houston),
17:45. Penalties: None.
Second Period — (5) U.W., Litsey
(Mavor), 11:13; (6) Mavor (Smith)
15:56; (7) U.W.. Houston, 1941. Penalties: Livingstone, Cudmore.
Third Period — (8) U.W., Smith
(Mavor), 1:29; (9) U.B.C, Lambert,
4:39; (10) U.W., Smith, 16:43; (11)
U.W., Mavor .Litscy), 7:53; (12)
U.B.C, Livingstone, 18:53. Penalties:
None.
Ruggers To
Play Van. Rep
Can Varsity pull a tie out of
the McKechnie Cup race?
It all depends on the Vancouver Rep team, which was
chosen after last Saturday's
game between the All-Blacks
and The Rest.
There is little doubt that the
Blue and Gold can take the
Rep. Saturday's game was ragged and showed a deteriorated
, North Shore aggregation, and
the game was a tie. At the
same time, it will be no walkover when the Thunderbirds
pile into them next week-end.
But can Vancouver down
Victoria? A field goal is no
guarantee of good rugby, and
Victoria could not pass Varsity's line, even before they
got up to their present form.
It was n lucky break for them
when they took the Blue. It Is
doubtful if they will make
much of an impression on the
Rep.
The game between Varsity
and the Rep. will be played
Saturday at Brockton Point.
Next Saturday's game promises to be only second to the
great All-Black contest two
weeks ago.
Get out and watch it!
-•>
Varsity Walks
Over Marpole
LINE-UP CHANGES WORK
Varsity ruggers continued their
march towards winning the Miller
Cup by defeating Marpole 37-6 on
Saturday. This leaves two games to
play, one against Rowing Club, thc
other against Nanaimo.
Thc score is not indicative of tlrj
game. In the fiist half the Blue and
Gold line was threatened time and
again, and they were lucky when a't
half time the .score stood 11-3. During the second half the student plays
began to click better. This may have
been due to change in the back-field
line-up. Carey came up to scrum
half, with Bird back to take his plage,
Robson moved to five eights, and
Roxborough to centre three. Roberts
took Bird's place on the wing. With
these changes Varsity started scoring
runs and for the linesman it was one
continual march from the side-line to
the goal line.
Madeley
Varsity Wins on the
Grass
Varsity hocv.ry men defeated Vancouver Club in a friendly match Saturday by the scoiv 3-1. Knight and
Ono scored for Varsity while Coney
got Vancouver's lone tally. Next Saturday Varsity meets Cricketers at
Brockton Point.
LOST
Three grey tweed overcoats on tlvj
clay of the Arts '20 relay—near "Eternity Where?" Please return to Cyril
Chave. P.O. 430.
Badminton Tournament
Now In Progress
The Varsity Badminton championships got under way last night. Advance reports indicate that all events
will be hotly contested and the present champions will haw their hands
full.
The two outstanding teams,for the
Men's Doubles are E. Seldon, P. O'Brien and P. Kozoolin, R. Allen. Allen was co-holder of the doubles last
year with Pat McTaggart-Cowan. Tire
ladies doubles' will most likely have
Misses Locke ar.d Palmer as the winners, though Miss Boyd and Miss
Meredith will cjivc them a hard struggle. Both are evenly matched teams.
Miss Locke and Ron Allen should
retain thc mixed event, though the
teams of Miss Boyd, O'Brien and Miss
Palmer, Kozoolin may give them a
run for their money.
In tho men's singles Kozoolin, former B.C. Juniov Champion, will most
likely meet Ron Allen, last year's
winner, in thi final. Other contenders in this even', will be J. Gould, E.
Seldon and P. O'Brien. Miss Locke
Inter-Class Basketball
Reaches Semi-finals
Arts '37 handed Science '37 a 34-8
drubbing last Thursday to eliminate
the first Science team since the start
of the series,
Last year's champions played flashy
basketball all the way and proved
that they are going to be the team
to beat r.gain this year.
Baskets by Idyll, McKee and Mac-
hin started the Artsmen off on the
right foot and they kept piling up
their lead until at the half the score
was 20-4.,
The Sciencemen played better boll
in the second half, holding their opposition down for about 10 minutes of
this period, while scoring 4 points
themselves. With the score 24-8 the
Artsmon again went on a scoring
rampage, making the final score 34-8.
Idyll, McLachlan and McKee were
the pick of the Artsmen, while Ross
and Obada starred for Science.
Arts '37 now meet the winner of
tho Science '38-Science '36 game. The
winner of this Arts-Science classic
will play Science '35 for the championship.
Thunderbirds Win And Lose
In League Playoff Games
SATURDAY'S
GAME
is expected to retain the women's
singles crown.
There are nlro handicap events
billed.
The club hopes to be able to stage
the finals in the gym Wednesday
noon.
Rhodes
The Thunderbirds proved conclusively that they ara still very much
ln the running for the Lower Mainland Basketball Championship when
they handed Adanacs a sound trouncing before a near-capacity crowd In
the University Gym Saturday night
The Issue was never doubtful. Vanity
led the Yellow-shirts through out the
game, and controlled tho play. They
took the lead ln the first minutes,
held It throughout, and flnally'trl-
umphed by a 34-22 score.
The first half was just about a repetition- of the first halves of all the
games played by Varsity In the last
month or so. The Thunderbirds
showed marked superiority over the
other team, checking, dribbling, shooting and blocking in brilliant style.
Varsity Leads 21-13
In consequence they found themselves with a substantial eight point
lead at half time, the score standing
at 21-13. No one was particularly
surprised at that, but a lot of people
expected that they would wilt in
the second half as they have been
all too apt to do lately.
But the Thunderbirds seemed to
have no intention of losing, whether
by fourteen points or by one point,
as they returned for the second half.
Instead, they gradually increased
their lead, and nothing Mayers or
Fraser or Matthison or any of the
Adanacs could do had any effect on
Varsity's purpose to come out on
top.
Mayers Stars
They continued to set the pace,
rushing the ball up and down the
floor nt a fast clip, but not so fast as
in the frist stan/a. George Pringle
and Ralph Henderson showed nice
long shooting form for Varsity, getting two long heaves apiece, while
Mayers showed tho Adanacs how they
should do it by popping long ones
over Tommy Mansfield's head. The
big Adanac forward had a very dcf:
inite on night, and was the only Yellow Shirt to show any real class.
Both Adanacs ond Varsity were inclined to be careless as the game
drew to a close. Mayers dribbled the
length of the floor through tho Varsity defence for the last basket of
the game, and it was just as well for
both their reputations that the game
ended there.
However, although the team played
good basketball in the second half,
and out-scored the Westminster boys
by four points in that period, they
revealed some disorganization, criticism beginning to fly among the
players, so that they were not as effective as in the first half.
Blocking Illegal?
Bardsley was again banished on
four fouls, as was Matthison of the
Adanac team. Two of Jimmie's fouls
were called when he was using the
new blocking play, and the legality
of the blocking was questioned.
The four regulars on the Varsity
team scored all of U.B.C.'s points,
while Mayers got by far the greater
number of Adanac's. Willoughby led
the Thunderbnd.i with eleven points.
Bardsley scored nine, Henderson eight
and Pringle six, Mayers scored thirteen of Adanac's twenty-two markers,
the next highest score on the Westminster team being Matthison's three.
Teams:
Varsity — Pringle 6, Bardsley 9.
Wright, Mansfield, Henderson 8, Willoughby 11, Swan, Osborne, Ross.—34.
Adanacs-tMatthison 3, Meehan, Fraser 2. Mayers 13. Smith 2, McEwan
2, McDonald, Holmes.—22.
Idyl/
I Going Good
ART WILLOUGHBY
Art has been playing a great game
In the playoffs, and has proved a real
thorn In the Adanac sides so far. The
burden of the attack has often been on
his shoulders due to Bardsley's frequent absences from the floor on
personals. Art, with twelve points, waa
high man for Vanity Saturday.
Senior B's Beat
Arnold & Quigley
WINNING POINTS SCORED
WITH A SECOND TO GO
LAST NIGHT'S
GAME
In a spiritless contest last night Adanacs on tho large Anna floor In New
Westminster, registered a one-sided
39-21 victory over Varsity to take the
lead ln the struggle for the League
Title. Score at half tune was 28-Mb
and although the Thunderbirds held
them even for the rest of the game
they were unable to close the gap.
Vanity's shooting during the whole
game was terrible, and they missed
numerous free shots that would have
meant a lot. Matthison and Douglas,
both Adanac players, were banished
on personals. The former, along with
Mayen and Fraser, were outstanding
for the Royalltes, while Willoughby
and Henderson were the best of the
Students.
Vanity: Willoughby (4), Bardsley
(4), Henderson (6), Pringle (3), Mansfield (3), Osborne (1). Total-21.
Adanacs: Mayen (8), Matthison (9),
Wright (8), Fraser (8), Holmes (4),
McEwen (2). Total-39.
Varsity's Senior B hoopers, after
having been kicked out of their
league playoffs by the league reading Telephones, staged a great comeback last Saturday night when they
came from away behind in the last
few minutes of play to sneak out a
snappy 34-33 victory over a smart Arnold and Quigley quintette.
The Thunderbirds were away behind in the first half and toward the
end of the second they were even
farther in thc red, when poof—some-
tiling happened that suddenly ,caused
them to brighten up with a brilliant
scoring streak that had their opponents completely befuddled. With a
second left to play the studes were
one point clown with their hearts in
their mouths when Clarence Idyll
grabbed the pill and without even
blinking an eyelash he swished it
through the hemp to win the ball
game.
Subs Star
It was not the regular hoopers for
the Thunderbirds who did the most
damage but more so the subs who
were asked to play at the last minute. Turner, Idyll and Phillips were
the pick of their squad and turned
in hard working performances.
Tho crowd got a laugh out of athletic representative Fred Bolton who
1 somehow was stuck in the game to
try to brighten up the rest of the
seemingly dead studes. He not only
succeeded in brightening them up but
he also started off most of the plays
in the last few minutes that won the
game. He appeared on the floor
dressed in a sweat suit that draped
over his frame like a tent and as a
result he had the 1000 fans rolling
in thc aisles with his antics.
The Senior B hoopers will again
play a preliminary contest with another outside tecim tomorrow in the
university gym previous to the Ad-
anac-Varsity contest.
Straight
Varsity Defeats
YakimaCollege
SECOND STRING HOLDS
VISITORS
With the second string of their first
team and the better players of their
Senior "B" squad on the floor for
the greater part of the time, Varsity
defeated Yakima College in a slow
basketball tilt Fiiday noon. Though
Ellensburg Normal fell before this
Washington team in the south, Yakima did not measure up to expectations, and after Bardsley, Willoughby
et al had given the locals a fair lead
the second team had little trouble
in holding it.
The game opened wiht a rather
suitable play when Willoughby secured the ball from the tipoff, started
the wrong way, and recovered himself to dribble the, length of the floor
and score. Larabee countered with
a shot fiom the side and the Yakima
captain, six-foot three "Slim" Fewell
gave his team the lead by sinking a
rebound. Art Willoughby came in
from the side unchecked to even the
count, and two blocking plays allowed
Henderson and Pringle baskets.
Half-time 17-13
Three more quick baskets by Fewell gave the Junior College boys the
lead for the last time 10-8. In spite
of the fact that the second string
were on the floor for the rest of thc
half, Varsity finished on top 17-13.
Before going to the showers the
first team took the floor to register
six points as the final canto began,
Sherer found the hoop for a basket
and a free shoe, and Smith's long
shot all the way from center, along
with Nelsen's foul throw, completed
the visitor's scoring for the day. Cy
Philips swished a long one through
as the bell rang.
Teams and Scores:
Varsity — Bardsley, Willoughby 8,
Henderson 2, Pringle 4, Osborne 2,
Swan 2, Mansfield, Ross 4, McKee 2,
Patmore 1. Phillips 2, Stockvis, Hardwick. Total—27.
Yakima—Fewell 8, Larabee 2. Mc-
Gordon* 2. Smith 4, Nelsen 1, Sherer
3. Total—20.
Edmonds
■lMaMIII«a*a|l|^»IHIMB>aa*BMtMB»H I
SPORT NOTICE
There will be a track practice Wednesday and Friday at
3:15. Pcicy Williams will be
out.
+..
SPECIAL LOW RATES ON PRIVATE DANCE LESSONS
to U.B.C. Students
"It costs less to learn from the best"
Mr.& Mrs. Vaughn Moore
Dance Institution
828 Granville Street
Ask for U.B.C. Rates
Seymour 481
Thunderbirds-Adanacs Wed. At Varsity