That Gigantic Sober Hurdle, aka New Year’s Eve

Well, ladies and gents, New Year’s Eve is fast approaching! I think this may just be, by all accounts, the biggest drinking day in the entire world! And here we are sober! Oh for goodness sake, how do we get through this night!?

I have read lots of advice/comments on how to survive the New Year’s sober, everything from just sleeping through it, or pretending that it’s an ordinary day in the week, to actually going out drinking, and then starting over on the 1st. Ugh. Not taking that advice!

For a long time in early sobriety, I dreaded the New Year’s!! I still wanted to celebrate it and celebrate it BIG, you know, party like a rock star! Of course totally forgetting that I am 40+, mom of three and I haven’t partied like a rock star, since, well… probably never, but I sure would like to think that I did!!

Back then being sober seemed like… sooo boring… there was no way to celebrate anything big and actually have a good time because celebrating always equaled drinking!

WHUT!!!??

This is by far the biggest misconception about getting sober!!! We somehow start believing that all the fun is now over… it all got poured down the drain with the booze… we are now condemned to live a glum and boring life… forever! But that is absolutely not true!

In fact, now that we are sober, we can actually do anything we want, and any way we want it. So instead of getting depressed about not partying on New Year’s, I recommend creating some new, fun, and special traditions to help you celebrate this awesome night sober!

Our new tradition for New Year’s Eve, is the “My favorite things”night! Basically we all wear our favorite clothes, eat our favorite foods, and play our favorite games. This is the one night when I let the kids eat the worst of all junk foods, and wear absolutely whatever they want! (Ugh, this can get pretty scary too!)

I start by asking what everyone’s favorite things to drink and eat were in 2014:

I will have snow crabs, lobster bisque and steak with garlic butter, surf and turf! Yummy!!! And of course I’ll be sharing!

We also have a bunch of new games that we got for Xmas this year. Our very favorite is the Just Dance for Wii Consoleseries, where players follow the on-screen dancer to earn points. Each year there is a new version released with the most recent Top 40 songs! We also love The Game Of Life: this game simulates a person’s travels through his or her life, from college to retirement, with jobs, marriage, and possible children along the way. Beat The Parents: this game brings the kids together with their parents to go head to head in the fun filled family trivia game. HedBanz Game: In this game kids use their heads in more ways than one while asking yes or no questions to figure out if the cartoon on their head. Be the first player to guess what you are and win. (All descriptions from game makers websites.)

All right! Now for some fun drinks! I don’t usually like non-alcoholic versions of normally alcoholic drinks, like the Bloody Mary or the Mojito, so I prefer to make drinks that are not the virgin versions of the alcoholic drinks. (Does that make scene? LOL!)

Here are my 2 favorites – I found these great and easy recipes on the HGTV website:

Directions:
Put the mango, cream of coconut, coconut milk and lime juice in the blender and puree until silky smooth. Add additional coconut milk, a tablespoon at a time, if needed to get the mixture moving in the blender. Pour into two hurricane glasses, garnish with mango and lime slices; serve immediately.

Directions:
Put the raspberries, honey, lemon juice and water into a saucepan and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce the heat to a gentle simmer and cook until the fruit has completely broken down, about five minutes. Remove from heat and let stand until cool. Pour the mixture into a fine mesh strainer set over a pitcher. Press the fruit solids with a rubber spatula to remove as much liquid as possible. Discard the fruit pulp. To serve, fill a Collins glass with ice and pour three tablespoons of the raspberry syrup into the glass. Fill with ginger beer, stir, garnish with raspberries or a lemon wedge and serve immediately.

***Note: Ginger beer is non-alcoholic despite its name, and can be found in the beverage/soda section of your supermarket.

Having fun in sobriety can be a whole new learning process. Like a toddler learning how to walk, being sober means re-learning everything we thought we once knew how to do only while drinking. So, start with a few things and keep trying others. The greatest part of this process is that you may find some new things that are actually really fun to do sober!

Happy New Year Sober!!!

If you, or anyone you know, is struggling with alcohol addiction, please click the Find Support link for an extensive list of support groups. Also please check out the links to many useful resources in the sidebar, and always feel free to contact me anytime at sobercourage@gmail.com.

You may also find some great inspiration and support from all the awesome sober bloggers listed in the side bar under POSTS I LIKE and RECOVERY BLOGGERS, as well as Sober Courage page on Facebook and Sober Courage on Twitter.

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Published by Magz

Welcome to the Sober Courage blog!
My name is Magz, and I am in recovery from Alcohol Use Disorder (AUD). I have created this blog to support sobriety and recovery at any stage of your journey. So, if you are in long-term recovery, or just starting out, or even still contemplating, welcome! Please stay a while, read lots, drop a comment, or two, and get inspired! Come join me on The Journey From Liquid Courage to Sober Courage, one day at a time!
Please visit the blog at https://sobercourage.com.
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Great post! I am on day 10 right now and am back and forth between talking myself out of not drinking – between New Years Eve and my 40th birthday on the 3rd (Saturday), I am questioning my decision to not drink and my resolve is weakening…HELP! Details on winecoloredmemories.blogspot.com – still trying to reconcile in my head if I truly have a problem or if I can drink “normally”

I can totally understand your dilemma! Been there! But you know if you wonder that you have a problem with drinking, well that is sort of a sign, because people that do not have a problem, do not question their drinking. Remember the day before your last day 1 and bring that memory up every time you think that the idea to drink again is a good one!

Hang in, you can do this sober, and not have the regrets…
Sending many hugs!

That is a hard call. I know everyone is different….but, I had 4 months and then went back for a vacation, it took me another 18 months to get back to not drinking. I also was never sure if I was really an alcoholic. I still am not sure, but I know my life is better without. Good luck with whatever you decide!

For me, life got better when I stopped drinking. I didn’t have one bottom, there were several. I don’t want to discourage you, and I don’t want to sugar coat it either. Quitting drinking is hard because we are addicted. But once your body and brain adjust, there is a whole new world out there with endless possibilities. It’s freedom. But it’s not instantaneous and it takes some work to learn how to live sober.
Just take it one day at a time. Don’t think of forever or next week or tomorrow. Wake up each day and ask yourself if you’d rather be drunk or sober.

Yes, it is so much easier not drinking. I sleep better, I can always drive home. The first couple of months were hard when I socialized. Last year I skipped a few holiday parties and the ones I did attend were not that great but I felt a social obligation, so I drank cranberry and seltzer and smiled. This year I found that I didn’t think about the drinking at the parties. As for a rock bottom, I guess I was a high bottom, good job, good marriage, healthy. I just knew I wanted to avoid health problems as I age, I was scared of liver disease and cancer. Also, I want to have a good, sharp brain for as long as I can. Also, I had a few nights over the years where I was really ashamed of my behavior, 2 or 3 made me think, something has to change. Also, I was scared of hoe 1 or 2 were never enough anymore. So I just decided that it was time and after many attempts, things finally clicked.

I really like your ideas. I especially like the notion that in sobriety, you can do anything for New Year’s Eve. Really very cool wonderful ideas.

I gotta agree with your (Magz) response to winecoloredmemories above. In my experience, I just haven’t run into someone who questioned whether they were an alcoholic or not, and ten years later, were not either sober, or still doing the same questioning because they still had not gotten it right. I don’t say this from some sort of ‘holier than thou’ dogmatic perspective. I kept asking myself the same question for quite a while and then I just got tired of trying to figure out a new way to prove to myself that I was not an alcoholic and could drink in moderation. I did a post on this a while ago that might be helpful. http://processnotevent.wordpress.com/2014/07/06/abstinence-vs-control-drinking/

Thanks Rober! Great comment! I tried moderation for a bit, I mean maybe a few months. It was what seems to me a huge amount of work. In the beginning it worked, I felt like I succeeded. But little by little it was harder and harder to stay on track. Eventualy I just gave in. Then things got really bad.

I supposed this is one of those things that maybe you just have to be honest who yourself about and look at your drinking history. Today I know for sure that any amount alcohol is bad for me. I don’t want it or need it. Life, even with all the crap is much better without it!

Loved all your fun ideas! I am heading to a party where I’ll be the only one not drinking. But what I noticed is, I still have fun. Now I can have fun, drive home and wake up feeling clear headed. Happy New Year!

Love this , “celebrating always equaled drinking!” This line kills me … I remember not wanting to take a 90 day chip because I knew I would want to celebrate 90 days of sobriety with a drink. Geez, what a drunk I was.

Maggie, Just sending over some New Year love. You are a great part of my sober online life and I just wanted to say that. Your writing never fails to tug at my heart and get me thinking and growing.

Hi Lisa! Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by! That is so very sweet! And Happy New your to you! Thank you for all your support and wise knowledge., and being such a huge part of my online support too. Sending many hugs and best wishes for 2015!