Only recently have we begun to understand the impact of having grown up with a narcissistic parent. Parents who are narcissistic carry damage from their own upbringing and as a result, have a difficult time seeing outside themselves and being able to empathize and tune in to their own children’s feelings. Typically, the narcissistic parent’s … Continued

When you were growing up, did you often feel like you had to be the “responsible one”, the “good child”, “the reliable one”, the one that could be counted on to take care of others and to do “the right thing”? Did you have to look after younger siblings in fundamental ways such as getting … Continued

I used to have a bunch of magnets with funny sayings on them on the side of the metal filing cabinet in my office. One of the magnets said: “Blame my parents. Don’t blame me!” Whenever a client passed by and caught a glimpse of that particular one, they would inevitably respond with a big … Continued

Introduction

Dr. Lillian Esses has dedicated this blog to the thousands of clients that I have worked with over the past three and a half decades. It is my way of expressing gratitude and paying forward one of the most precious gifts a human being can give to another; that is, the trust to allow the deepest parts of themselves to be revealed. For me, this has been a sacred journey and a privilege beyond what words can express and if there is any way that others can benefit from the kernels of truth found in the soul-searching of others, I am honored to be able to pass this on...