We know of one couple (Gina you know who I mean) who turned their profile into a hatefest for each other after the husband was informed by his wife that she was in love with the m half of a couple.

Their tag line for a time was "OUT OF THE LIFESTYLE! SEE YOU IN CHURCH!"

Windermere FL

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Sounds like she's into beastiality. I'd report it!

Moron Buenos Aires Argentina

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CPLPFUN: Yes, the wife seemed very much into playing at first, matter of fact, she broke the ice the first time by getting nude! Now we find out that she was doing so to please her husband. You're right we don't find new friends (vanilla) if they go through bad times. We are not like that. That is why we are helping the wife, and will even be helping her move back home out of state. We have two other LS cpls that we do travel with and they are both very secure in their relationships. Was just wondering how many others have had this happen! I'm (female) new to all this.

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Do you have the same "no drama" policy for your vanilla friends? When they go through break ups and divorce do you feel like you need to find new friends? Cheaters are going to cheat, whether they're active in this lifestyle or not.

When you invite people into your life in any capacity, you're inviting the potential for drama. Our "no drama" policy pertains mostly to people who like to make mountains out of mole hills. I presumed (incorrectly I guess) that's what everyone else meant by it as well.

Also, between the fact that you start off by saying the husband was all about it but never mentioned the wife and then closed by saying that the wife has no desire to be in the LS anymore, it sounds a lot like she was never all that interested in the first place.

Maybe in the future you should stick to couples that have 2 enthusiastic participants instead of 1.

T

Danville PA

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Hot, A few years ago We had a similar scenario play out, where we were very clsoe with friends we knew in and out of this activity. to the point the male and I worked certain jobs together, what We didn't know is that he was living a thrid life If you would. He had 2 other women who he played with, and he used me as a cover when he would go with them, Telling his GF he was with me or working etc..... We didn't know until we were all in Ft Lauderdale that spring , when his GF blew a gasket, and they had a blowout in front of us. it was one of our worst trips and experiences since we had started swinging ( @ 8 years at the time) It wasn't our issue, it wasn't our fault but we ended up smack dab in the middle, not very fun when You are staying in a motor home. When it was all said and done they split then got back together, and then split again, All the while we didn't want to seem like we didn't care, or be percieved as rude. It did leave a sour taste in our mouth with regards to Now , we are social but tend to keep things as what they are . we still have a few couples we are clsoe with and hang out with, but not like we used to. when we travel now with friends , we make our own plans , do our own thing , and always have a Get out of dodge option. I guess our advice is that you just have to be cautious, not every body has the same outlook or agenda in life

Middletown NY

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Even though Pandora has given me her blessing to go do whatever I want, I still feel weird about taking her up on her offer (Admiral Ackbar comes to mind...). I've turned down offers to join into some serious fun while I'm traveling just because of how guilty I'd make myself feel for doing it.

With that being said, the opportunity to cheat is plentiful in the LS, especially if you travel a lot. Unless your play partners contact your spouse to ask if solo play is alright, there's really no way of ever finding out until its too late.

I do feel bad for your friend though. I've been (though not in an LS capacity) where she's been.

Long Beach CA

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Ok. We contacted a local cpl a year ago. First meet, the husband was all for playing; so we went back to their place. A good time was had by all...... We became FWB with them: They have come our timeshare in the Florida Keys, we have shared holidays, etc. We even went out with them on NYE of this year; only to be told that the husband was not feeling well (although he was up for going to b strip club after dinner) and they went home. Come to find out, the husband has been cheating on his wife, and she found out!! This guy thinks that being in the LS gives him free range to do whatever he pleases; and that his wife should put up with it!! BTW, they are now separating, etc. What part of NO Drama do people understand?? Guess, we shouldn't have become vanilla friends with them, because we really CARE about the wife and are helping her though this mess. We are going to help her move, etc. because we are friends with her. She does not want to be in the LS anymore, which we can't blame her! Has anyone else had this happen to them? Where one partner goes off the deep and uses he LS for their own manipulation? We are not leery of becoming friends with anyone else because of it. It's a shame, because we enjoy doing vanilla activities with people. Also, the husband's not wanting to "play" the last couple of times we went out with them, really hurt MY (female half) ego!!

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