After refusing to participate in a roadside sobriety check, he told the cops that his alleged girlfriend, 22-year-old pop country star Taylor Swift, had been driving the car. Boedecker said Swift had bailed on him after a lover's quarrel, although police were unable to find anyone matching her description in the immediate vicinity.

The problem with that story? Taylor Swift is dating an 18-year-old member of the Kennedy clan, and probably wouldn't have much to do with a creepy looking old guy who swears at the police and brags about the 17 homes he supposedly owns when they ask for his address.

Then again, stranger things have happened, but Boulder authorities didn't buy it and arrested the ugly-shoe magnate — who allegedly smelled like booze — for suspicion of driving under the influence. Unfortunately, Boedecker was reportedly wearing flip flops instead of Crocs, which we imagine are well suited for jail-related activities.

After delivering a menacing sneer into the Boulder jail's booking photo camera, Boedecker was released on $500 bond. Swift has been curiously quiet about the incident.