THE LIFE

Text-iquette: Say What?

Text messages can turn the simplest phrase into the most complicated statements ever. Why does this form of communication hold so much weight?

Sometimes I get so irritated with all of the things that go along with sending text messages. You don’t want to sound rude nor do you want to sound too laxed.

There’s always something more to think about other than the message itself that you are trying to relay. Oh the stress of just a text!

No matter the age, sex, or relationship, some of these occurrences make you want to throw your phone at the person sending the messages.

While doing my daily horoscope readings, I noticed an article on Cosmopolitan.com about text message etiquette and I just couldn’t stop laughing. I could actually name a person that committed each and every crime on the list – including myself. I’m sure I am not that only person that can pin point a few people in my phone book that have committed the following texting shenanigans.

The Mass Text: It’s Friday night, you’re at home on the couch, and you get a text that goes something like this: “What are you getting into tonight?” You know for a fact that this very same text just went out to 20 other people at exactly the same time, and that the sender is just waiting to receive all his/her options before deciding what to do.

So what if the only thing you have planned for the night is a lame (but sooo good) Lifetime movie at 11? You refuse to hang out with someone unless they make specific plans to hang out with you.

You know how you can block those newsletters that you never signed up for by sending an e-mail with “unsubscribe” in the body? We suggest doing the same thing in a reply-text.

The Texting Cult: There is always at least one point in the night — a lull in the conversation, a pause between thoughts — when it gets really quiet, and you look around and realize that all your friends are busy texting. One person pulls out her iPhone while everyone else is looking at the dinner bill, and then someone else starts doing it, and before you know it, you’re in the middle of the sacred circle of text. Resist the urge to choose some random person in your contacts to send a useless message to. Instead, pull out your phone and send a text to everyone at the table asking, “Should we order another drink?” It will make everyone laugh but also point out the silliness of the situation.

The Double Message: Of course you screen calls, everyone does. Sometimes you’re in the middle of something and other times, you just don’t feel like talking. But your phone is still working and you see the missed call and the voice message alert. So why — why?! — do certain people feel the need to send a text letting you know that they just left a message?

Don’t they realize that if someone is smart enough to read a text, they’re also capable of understanding what the little bobble head with the sound waves coming out of him symbolizes? Text back, “What’s next, a carrier pigeon?”

The Texting Tease: You’re seeing a really cute/smart/funny/cool new guy and your heart skips a tiny beat every time you get a text from him. In the middle of the week, you get one asking what you’re up to this weekend. Assuming he wants to do something together, you let him know that it’s looking pretty relaxed so far.

Does he then proceed to make a plan with you? No. He responds, “Oh okay, cool.” You stand there with a perplexed look on your face. Respond “Yeah, but call my secretary if you want to schedule something.” This way, the ball is in his court, but ultimately you’re the one who is in charge, thanks to your confident attitude.

The Bored Texter: You’ve just finished a sufficiently long and entertaining texting exchange with someone, and now you’re ready to put your phone down for a little while. But your phone dings, and it’s another text from said person. It looks like this: “Soooo…” Or, “What upppp.” Or, “la la la…” Clearly, they have nothing else to say and just want something to do. Send a text saying, “Running, watching movies, reading books, baking.” Your buddy will get the point that some people actually have a life.

About the Author

Demaris Bailey

Demaris Bailey is an Editor for Socialtik Mag and public relations scholar from the Bronx, NY. Attending high school in suburban Massachusetts and a Historically Black University has helped her understand cultural boundaries and differences.

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