Old Wounds: Part Nine

I read a few comments in this arc where folks didn’t seem to enjoy the time it is taking to delve into the characters lives away from the table and/or like or fully understand why someone like Carlos is even part of the group. These topics could be a huge blog post on their own, but I’ll try to keep it short and simple:

I am working to tell the stories I want to tell, with the characters I want to develop. I’m not saying that with anger or any passive-aggressive undertones, I promise. I am starting to understand that what I create may not float everyones boat and that is okay (no Brian, its okay. Really.). I am trying new things and trying to push myself in new ways. Carlos (like the entire cast) is a work-in-progress, just like we all are. This series used to be all about the low-hanging fruit and the panel/panel/dick joke format but I have changed. My work and the series will likely continue to evolve as the years go by. I hope you can understand and appreciate that. If the series isn’t your cup of Mountain Dew anymore, no hard feelings. I promise. We will be getting back to the table soon but this kind of pacing, the humor, and the characters are here to stay for now.

It’s called depression/pretty damn bad social anxiety (combined with what seems like some rather long-lived self-esteem issues. If it’s aimed towards you and can be taken to be negative – you will almost always take it to be negative*. Even if you rationally know it wasn’t. I tend to do this myself sometimes, although luckily not as badly as Carlos**. It sucks dogshit.

*Well, it’s like this for *some* people, at least. Everyone is different, obviously.
**and mostly when looking back at the situation afterwards. I have a talent for negatively overthinking shit.

Damnit! WTB edit function. Or working eyes that tell me where it is. The parenthesis that starts here; “(combined with” should close here; “self-esteem issues)” Any other errors can live their life as they want. But that particular one pissed me off.

We, as outside observers, can easily see it was a joke, especially considering we’ve already seen Brett play diceless games (even if there was copious bitching on his part). Carlos hasn’t been privy to that side of things, has his own nervousness issues (especially with the “little Carlos” episode when Sam went to invite him to the group) it’s his first time trying to DM (we could easily read how nervous he was, and how much he wanted things to go well) plus Brett is kinda officially his boss, and Santa, and he presumably knows about all the other mantle related chaos that’s happened over the years. Someone ruining Christmas is a very real possibility in this world (not just for a family, but on a global scale) and Trevor’s delivery was a bit too spot on for Carlos to see beyond the words & get that it was a playful jab, and not a “life & death seriousness OMG” level accusation.

I don’t get her anger. Dude fucked it up, to be sure, and he ought have known better.

Sometimes, you just have to take it on good faith that people hurt you without any intention to do so. It isn’t as if he was callous to Carlos’s feelings, he knows he hurt him and is rightfully ashamed. It needs to be addressed, sure, but the anger is fairly unwarranted. *shrug* Dunno, man. YMMV

I think there’s two other things at play here that are related 1: Brett IS Santa Claus, and Carlos being carlos, the mere thought that he screwed up things for everyone else on a massive scale is something his anxiety is gonna have a field day with. 2: Brett is also now Carlos’s boss.

I love that you’re covering how an offhand “joke” can be so devastating. I see so much of this in social media, where folks are more interested in the zing and scoring points than in measuring the effect of their words.

tell the story you need to tell and people will appreciate it. maybe not all of them, but the ones that matter. going with what people seem to want at the moment is what got us all this crap “reality tv”…

I want to preface this as it’s 2:00AM and I just got off work so this may be a little ramblely.

I’m not sure Carlos is a good inclusion for this group. I don’t mean to say everyone else is dicks, a lot of them share the same smart arse sense of humour I do and I appreciate that. However, I honestly think a smaller game and a smaller group to start off with would do wonders for him, and potentially a more common easier system.

Learning to DM can be a pain – certainly not something that can be picked up on over night. A simple, easy to use system where everyone knows the rules and is comfortable with it is, I find at least, your best bet. Even if it’s only a session or two so you can get used the dynamics of the group. What they did to Carlos was cruel, but in some ways he should have taken it better, yes, being mocked hurts; I’m not denying that.

But I feel that he should, idk, known what they were like going in? This isn’t his first foray into the groups dynamic as is and if he has hung out with any of them before he should know that Brett and Trevor(?) are kinda assholes.

Anyway, I’m really enjoying this so far so Brain keep up the good work, and keep being an inspiration for other webcomic people, as I’m sure you are for some.

tl:dr Carlos kinda needs to get some help, people are dicks it happens, and start with an easier and common system your first time out to learn group dynamics.

For what it is worth, I enjoyed your early work *despite* the constant stream of dick jokes. I like what you’ve done, and will continue to stay with it until the end, which is hopefully a long long long long way away.

I like the way you’ve developed the strip over the years. I think it’s exactly right that you should go from carefree teenage years to the serious business of Sam’s depression, Carlos’s self-esteem, Dove, Brett’s maturity, and even simple things like the escape to a bit of gaming.

I still remember the TPK you wrote what feels like such a long time ago now, and how Sam found out that his friends like him. It was totally worth the several years we waited to see what happened after good honest Sam threw the obnoxious Dove out of his shop to find that Sam’s brother is simply using Dove for his own agenda, and we wait for the next instalment in that saga. I want to find out what’s happening with Amy.

Just wanted to say I’ve been reading the comic for a couple years now and I really like the direction you’ve taken it. As much as I liked the early simple stuff, the characters have grown and so has the storytelling. It’s still funny, while telling emotionally engaging stories. D&D is about the people around the table as much as it is about anything that happens in game, and D20monkey reflects that really wonderfully. Keep up the good work.

Seconding… uh, thirding… uh, sixty-fifth-ing the love for the more immersive stories. <3
Judging by this comment section alone, you clearly have plenty of fans who want the plot as much as the dick jokes, and are happy with both, so the way I see it, you don't necessarily have to make apology for that. It's fine to like and want dick jokes, but it's up to them to go elsewhere to meet their needs if they have to.
And the fact of the matter is… at the end of the day – YOU'RE the GM, uh, author. It's your story, and you get to tell it your way, dammit! People are free to get upset at you – but you ultimately don't OWE them anything. You only owe it to yourself, because the only thing that really matters is if you can say you're pleased with your own work.
So screw the naysayers, you do you. 😀

On another note, I LOVE how Trev can merely *sense* the shift in the Cosmos that is Jeanie's righteous rage.

As someone who commented on the personal plot not being my cup o’ tea… first: responsive feed back from you is really nice to have.

Second: this strip was very good. You got me to smile.

I totally accept the characters and the humour. It’s why I do chose to come back. I just like that, like me, these are people for whom the D&D table is important, and I find time away from the table in the strip frustrating.

Wow, Jerk much? Or are you just a teenage troll? Any serious reader of this comic knows that a good chunk of this comic is about dealing with the very real affliction of depression. AND, any serious reader knows that if you don’t like the way the strip is going… go find another strip. there are lots out there. We like this one the way it is.

As someone who suffers from social anxiety and depression, I can relate to Carlos’ story and reactions.

Both suck a bag of rotten dicks and both are hugely misunderstood by the “normal” person.

I’ve also had to deal with both sans professional help and it’s made me stronger. Sure I still deal with suicidal thoughts now and again but then I remember that it would hurt people I care about (by care about I mean that I would rip apart time and space to save them. When it comes to my friends and family, I am fiercely protective) and put those thoughts out of my head.

I love the character development and the fact that you handle such issues with care and decency.

I love the character development. Anyone who doesn’t can read some other comic. D20monkey in all its forms karthun, innsmouth, keeper of the seasons, the players at the table, and/or their lives away from gaming is great! Keep it up. Haters can walk.

I for one cant wait to see what happens with the strip! I love your comics, your style and the dialog 😀

I would love to see this go on for a long while, though the short strips are cool, the long ones are what makes me come back to it.
Look at Giant in the playground and his order of the sticks that has been going on for many a year(I own all his books and preludes) and see if you cant strive for such a storyline.

that would be awesome(and you can always throw in a few short stories in between, or in the patreon section wink wink)

I never post comments, other than maybe once per year. Just wanted to say that Im a huge webcomic follower (I follow regularly around 35 different webcomics since about 7 years ago) and as such, I’ve become quite critical, and I can say you’re doing quite a good job Brian, dont make what you dont want to make, do what you love, people will like it the more! Keep it up!

I for one am glad you’re writing the comic you want to write, I think that can only lead to better quality end product. I don’t usually comment, just thought I’d throw it out there that I love the strip even with the new direction, because it’s easy to stay quiet when you’re happy with things, which can lead to an imbalance when only the less satisfied people comment. That said, I do hope the dick jokes don’t disappear completely 😛

Given that Trevor didn’t follow Carlos and try to talk him back… that is not the hallmark of a good friend. He apologised, sure, but why is he not there with Carlos at the bus stop trying to fix his own fuck up?

You take your time and get into these characters, Brian. I love it, and I’m here for the ride, because this comic is consistently awesome whether it’s about the campaign or the people. Or Santa kicking asses.

You are doing great. I love the storytelling and the character progression. Evolving as a writer and artist is important. I hope you continue to listen to your own voice when you choose where your characters go and your story progresses. We are spectators, supporters to this unfolding. What could be better?

Man, I LOVE the way you are continuing to evolve both as a writer and an artist. Growth and change is important. Some people (e.g., the band AC/DC) enjoy doing the same thing over and over for thirty years but others enjoy changing and evolving. You’re the latter type and I love the stuff you’re coming up with.

And I love Carlos too. I hope they can talk him down off the ledge. Poor guy.

I am enjoying the new directions and the stronger focus on the characters, but i wll admit that i do miss seeing stories about actual gameplay and in game interactions. I was so excited when carlos brought out andromeda x, because even though it had no dice rolling, we would be getting some more playtime for the fir time in what feels like years. I do enjoy how you write characters and as someone who suffers from anxiety, this arc really hits home, but i do miss when you do lighter material or game commentary