Editorial: Throwing darts at Dark Souls II

Despite its glowing scores across the board, Sean Knight is taking aim at some issues he has with Dark Souls II

I’ve been playing quite a bit of Dark Souls II lately and, to be honest, I’m not too sure about the game. At times I enjoy it, and then there are other times when I find it annoying. There are just some things that I can’t get over; things that I have to point out that I would never include in a review.

For instance, the way the player character holds a shield. Seriously, did someone call the limphand brigade to design the shield’s grip? There are supposed to be two straps on the back of that shield so as to allow your entire forearm to support it. If you were to hold a shield the way they do in Dark Souls II, your wrist would quickly be broken while trying to block or deflect a blow. That, or you wouldn’t be able to hold it that way for more than 10 seconds.

You’re going to break something doing that!

Then there is the stamina bar. I mean… come on! Is From Software telling me that I can’t swing a sword more than three or four times without needing a rest? Although, I must admit, greatswords could be understandable if someone is not used to swinging one around. But then you can only swing that same sword two different ways. It really irked me that I needed to switch from using a longsword to a shortsword because I couldn’t do a thrusting attack with the longsword.

Are you kidding me?

I should not have to switch to another weapon because I can’t use the one I prefer to thrust at an enemy. A longsword can slash, it can strike, and it can even thrust (it also makes julienne fries).

In other words… I should be able to stick my enemies with the pointy end!

Longsword performance issues affect more than just yourself…

Of course, I have to talk about the jumping in the game. How is it that I can only jump when I am dashing forward? Can someone explain this? The character is incapable of jumping at all unless he is running. Where is the logic in that?

I’m not ashamed to admit that I didn’t realize this was the only way to jump. I spent quite a bit of time hitting the “F” key, which is the default button using mouse and keyboard controls, and then re-binding the key to see if it would work on another button.

And the Emerald Herald over in Majula? Why can’t she just stop talking so I can level up? I don’t know about you guys, but having to listen to her drone on for a bit until I can finally access the menu is very irritating. Of course, she wasn’t the only NPC that does it, but she is the one I tend to visit the most.

In all seriousness, I get the reasons for some of these things. More specifically, those related to combat. But that brings up my whole issue with the combat system: it isn’t very good. To put it simply, the combat is hobbled so that the game appears to be more difficult and challenging.