The Front Line for the Awesomeness Offensive

Jason Collins Likes Penis

I don’t know if you expect some sort of gay bashing article based on the title…..but that isn’t what you are about to read. I am a supporter of the LGBT community. Jason Collins has decided to come out of the closet publicly. He is currently a player in the NBA. This is a groundbreaking act for the gay community.

You like penis better than vagina?? Cool bro. That is just how your brain is wired. I like vanilla ice cream better than chocolate. Some would say that I am crazy for this…..but I can’t help how my brain deciphers billions of electrical impulses from my life experiences which cause me to prefer vanilla over chocolate. I can’t tell my brain that this is not what is the accepted norm. My preference is wired in and that is how it is going to be…..forever. I feel that is how people’s sexuality is. It is similar to food preference….and it should be treated as such.

I don’t like seafood. Not lobster, not shrimp, not fish, not sushi….none of it. I don’t like the taste. I don’t like the texture. I don’t like the smell. I don’t like the idea of where it comes from. It just isn’t my thing. A lot of people LOVE seafood. I would say a majority of this planet likes seafood. I am in the minority when it comes to my dislike of it. Should I be dragged into the streets and stoned (the archaic punishment….not in the backseat of a car with your friends)? I like beef, poultry, and pork. Should I be beaten if I try to order a Filet Mignon at an Oyster Bar?? Absolutely not. That would be insanity. In my mind it is just as insane to ostracize someone for being gay.

You can even say that maybe vagina is like seafood to a gay man (insert “it smells like fish” joke here). Just let him order his big slab of beef and enjoy it while you chow on your clams (so many innuendos in there….i’m really smart). Everyone just wants to eat, right? Everyone just wants to enjoy themselves, right?? Live and let live.

If you want to go down the “against the word of God” road….I can defeat your bullshit slinging too.

“Fags will burn in hell!! They are sinners!!!”…….oh yea?? God frowns upon divorce. It wasn’t even an option back in the old days. A woman that wanted to get divorced was to be put to death. We changed our views on that shit as society evolved. Time to evolve again.

You know what else is a sin?? Adultery. Yup, says it right there in the ten commandments. No sex out of wedlock. That is a sin. Seems to be pretty accepted these days. With the exception of Tim Tebow… most people with a pulse in today’s society have had premarital sex. So when I hear people knocking homosexuality by quoting the bible….it is hipocrisy at it’s finest.

What about God mentioning that only he will be the one to do the judging?? All those super religious retards tend to forget about that.

So you’re gay?? Awesome. Be gay. You’re straight. Awesome. Be straight. You’re bisexual. Awesome (more awesome if you are a chick). Be bi. The shitty part is that I shouldn’t have to explain a tolerant way of thinking about it. If you don’t like it….eat a dick (see what I did there?).