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Surrogacy and HIV

My partner and I tested positive for HIV last year which pretty much dashed our hopes of ever having a biological child of our own...until recently. In February, we saw an article in the LA Times that talked about the ASRM (Am. Soc. for Reproductive Medicine) and a new policy regarding HIV stating that fertility doctors should not discriminate against men or women with HIV. They mentioned, in regard to HIV+ men, a 'sperm washing' procedure that minimized the risk of transmission to a HIV- woman. Doctors have been helping serodiscordant couples (where the man is HIV+) for years...controversial at first, but more and more clinics are doing these procedures. The problem is, we are not a straight couple, we need the assistance of a surrogate in the baby-making process. This 'third party' has caused problems for the lawyers involved in this process...as a result, even though we have talked to several surrogates willing to help us, no one (doctors, lawyers, clinics) will touch our case? We think this is discriminatory, as surrogates take on many risks involved with pregnancy, why is HIV considered a risk not worth taking while infertility or death (both more likely to happen then HIV transmission with these safe procedures) not even talked about, and isn't that for the surrogate to decide anyway? Believe us, if we felt there was any risk of transmitting HIV to a surrogate, we wouldn't even suggest this. It would be helpful if doctors could give a guarantee to the lawyers that HIV transmission will not happen, but there are no gaurantees in medicine. The procedures have been done safely, with no transmission of HIV to a woman, a couple thousand times throughout the world but I guess it will have to be done 100,000 times before it is 'proven' safe, which will never happen in our lifetime.

I'm curious to know what people think. I realize people have a strong reaction when they hear HIV. However, the risk here is almost nonexistant...definitely LOWER than the risks of, for instance, death or infertility assiociated with pregnancy and childbirth. I ask myself, would I take this risk if I were a surrogate...my answer is that I would certainly consider it and I would hope that that would be a decision I was allowed to make given all of the facts.

I'm willing to admit, my desire to have a child of my own may be clouding my vision when it comes to this issue. I'd like to know what you all think. Thanks in advance for your input.

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