Love & sex

I’m single and loving it – unless you know someone?

After ten years of always being in relationships, I’ve found myself alone at 29. But don’t worry about me, I want to shout it from the rooftops: I’m single and loving it!

As Tyler Durden said: “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.” And I, for one, have nothing left to lose. Without the constant presence of a man by my side, I can’t even remember what it feels like to be in love. Finally, some time for me.

Now that I’m single, I can focus all of my energy on my career. Ever since I started suppressing my fear of hurt and rejection, I’ve been crushing it at work like a total #girlboss! Plus, there’s always time for crying on the weekend.

I’m even thinking of getting a ‘Miss Independent’ tattoo over my bruised and broken heart. Mainly because such is my commitment to my newfound singledom, but also because I made eye contact with the tattoo guy at the pub last weekend and I thought maybe there was a spark there.

When you’re in a relationship, it’s easy to let friendships fall by the wayside, but not me! I can actually go to all those parties that people I met at Bestival three years ago keep sending me Facebook invites for. I go out every Friday night and only rarely end up sobbing into the tail end of a bottle of pinot greege.

Although I desperately crave the feeling of letting my guard down, overcoming my deep-rooted trust issues and attaining intimacy with another human being, at least I never feel guilty about flirting with Sam in accounts.

All I’m saying is, I don’t need a man to make me happy. Who needs a man?

Who has a man?

Do you have a man?

Can I have your man?

Do you know any men?

I don’t believe in The One, but if you know anyone, ANYONE at all who might like to go out sometime, let me know. Please.

If Sharon Horgan ever wants a real-life daughter called Muireann, she knows a woman for the job. Her hobbies include learning improv and telling everyone how she's learning improv now. Gordon Ramsay once said she had good hair.