The best part of waking up, is Satan in your cup! That’s what a Louisiana woman discovered this week when she was served a pentagram/666 combo foam at the mall Starbucks, which somehow wasn’t her thing! Via the Starbucks facebook page:

“I just purchased two coffees at your Mall of Louisiana location. This is how my coffee was served to me. I unfortunately can’t give the young mans name who served it because I was so appalled that I could not bring myself to look at him. The star is almost okay because it is in your Starbucks logo, the 666, however was quite offensive. I am in no way judging his beliefs or dis-meriting his beautiful artwork, I am however judging his lack of professionalism and respect for others.
I am a teacher in the public school system and if I were to present a child of atheist or pagan believers with a Christian art project I could be sued in a heartbeat. I am of Catholic faith and would love to share in my beliefs daily. Fortunately I have enough common sense to present myself with professionalism and follow an ethics code. Perhaps that could be suggested to that particular location.”

Let’s just say that before that coffee hits my lips in the morning, that the only person that could match my vibe would actually be Satan, so in terms of acknowledging his presence in my mood via my latte, I would give this barista a 10 for creativity. I mean, she took to their Facebook page?! I can just picture what this woman looks like, and so can you, and we’re thinking about the exact same woman right now.

Eeeesh! 19-year-old Miranda Barbour of Pennsylvania just admitted to the killing of a man she located in a sex ad on Craigslist — under her murderous alter-ego Super Miranda! During an interview with The Daily Item, she also claimed she has killed just under around 100 ‘bad people’ from Alaska to North Carolina in the last 6 years as part of her involvement in joining a Satanic cult when she was only 13. How DEXTER of her! (They start so young nowadays!)
Anyhow — we can probably all rest easy tonight because even though Miranda‘s body’s saying “LET’S GO”, her heart is saying “NO”. She told investigators that she doesn’t want to get out of jail and that she would kill again if she were released, so we’re thinking they’re probably gonna throw away the key on this one.
This is all your fault, Alaska! Your weird, remote nether-regions always seem to find these lost souls and place them right into Satan’s warm lap! Example #1: Sarah Palin!