1) (noun) A sad existence. A leech with no musical taste that listens to every thing that the wannbe-hipster hotspot, pitchfork.com, gives an 8.3 or higher.

2) (verb; to bitchfork) To flame people for their musical taste, if the respective artist was not given an 8.3 or higher on pitchfork.

1) Bitchfork: OMG have you heard the new Sunset Rubdown album, it's absolutely brilliant. 8.3 / 10!!! The greek allusions are so down to earth and not pretentious. Oh, did i forget to mention i love Animal Collective.
Normal Person: What a bitchfork.

2) Douche: Omg, i don't think that there are enough Greek allusions in the new Peter, Bjorn & John album. It's so mainstream indie, and behind the times. Animal Collective ,however, rules!
Person 1: What is going on
Person 2: Leave him alone, he's just bitchforking.

A fork with a bitch on it. Can be used for sexual pleasureful acts, threats, looking like an idiot on the corner of your road, or getting your anger out. The fork can range from the size or a toy fork to the world's biggest fork. The bitch can range from a polly pocket to a 5623896534756 pound woman. Having a man on the fork is strictly prohibited.

1.(appears at someone's house with bitchfork) You did not come to our meeting spot to dye my hair pink you twat! I was you in the fecking cold for an hour! And you didn't show up! BAAH Dye my hair pink now or have this bitchfork at your house forever!!!

2. Oh yeaaah you bitchfork that's the spot

3. I had such a bad day today! Good thing I have this bitchfork to take my anger out on *shoots in kneecap*