COPEhttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net
Centre of Perinatal ExcellenceThu, 07 Feb 2019 06:42:06 +0000en-AUhourly1https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.10Mel’s Jumphttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mels-jump/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mels-jump/#respondWed, 15 Aug 2018 06:26:54 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=7968I first came across Mother Jumpers on Facebook a few months before the jump was to take place. It immediately caught my eye as a great way to do something adventurous that I’d always wanted to do while helping those in need at the same time. I did some more research into Support For Mums and knew that this was an organisation I wanted to help. I luckily had no issues with my pregnancy or birth and have very supportive family and friends, but I can understand how difficult it would be to go through this experience alone. Coming across […]

]]>I first came across Mother Jumpers on Facebook a few months before the jump was to take place.

It immediately caught my eye as a great way to do something adventurous that I’d always wanted to do while helping those in need at the same time.

I did some more research into Support For Mums and knew that this was an organisation I wanted to help. I luckily had no issues with my pregnancy or birth and have very supportive family and friends, but I can understand how difficult it would be to go through this experience alone.

Coming across Mother Jumpers quite late, I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to get enough donations in the short space of time before the skydive was to take place. I needn’t have worried, as family, friends, colleagues, local businesses and patients at the hospital I work at were very generous in their donations. I quickly surpassed my target and was overwhelmed with the support I received.

As the day got closer, I became more and more excited about the skydive. My kids were excited too, although at 2 and 4 I don’t think they really understood what crazy feat mum was going to do!

The day of the jump was grey and I hoped that it wouldn’t be cancelled. My husband and two children took me to the drop zone and we’re going to be waiting for me to land.

It was seriously one of the best things I have ever done! I was so excited and couldn’t wait to jump out of the plane. Everyone in the group was excited, if a little nervous, and it was nice to have a couple of other Mother Jumpers in our plane load.

The free fall was amazing and it was such an adrenaline rush. Once the parachute was up, I could appreciate the gorgeous view above St Kilda and just how high up I’d been when I jumped.

My husband and the kids were down below when I landed and were almost as excited as I was. I couldn’t wipe the grin off my face for the whole day. Even now when I think about it or look at photos or the DVD, I get a great big smile on my face.

I’m so glad I had the opportunity to step out of my comfort zone to do this skydive. It was a wonderful experience for me personally and a great way to help Support For Mums in a unique way.

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mels-jump/feed/0Maya’s Jump – Canberra MotherJumpershttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mayas-jump-canberra-motherjumpers/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mayas-jump-canberra-motherjumpers/#respondWed, 15 Aug 2018 06:16:42 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=7959This is something I have always wanted to do. But as a busy mum, I found myself always making excuses not to. When I found out about Mother Jumpers, and with my 30th birthday just around the corner, There were no more excuses! ….. Sat 29th Nov 2014 I took the plunge….. I must say that this was, by far the most amazing experience ever! You do not feel like you are free falling at all! It’s like you are flying!

]]>This is something I have always wanted to do. But as a busy mum, I found myself always making excuses not to. When I found out about Mother Jumpers, and with my 30th birthday just around the corner, There were no more excuses! ….. Sat 29th Nov 2014 I took the plunge….. I must say that this was, by far the most amazing experience ever!

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/mayas-jump-canberra-motherjumpers/feed/0Transition from ‘Working Person’ to ‘Working Parent’http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/transition-from-working-person-to-working-parent/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/transition-from-working-person-to-working-parent/#respondMon, 20 Mar 2017 02:33:11 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=6333 Becoming a parent is one of the most significant transitions a person will go through in their lifetime. Many adjustments have to be made, including the transition from ‘working person’ to ‘working parent’. Setting up a successful Parental Leave Transition As a perinatal psychologist, who specialises in the emerging field of Parental Leave Support, I have observed the following patterns to setting up a successful transition: Become Informed – Find out about your organisation’s parental leave and flexible work policies – Ask don’t assume! You may be surprised at how much support there is available in this area. The […]

Becoming a parent is one of the most significant transitions a person will go through in their lifetime. Many adjustments have to be made, including the transition from ‘working person’ to ‘working parent’.

Setting up a successful Parental Leave Transition

As a perinatal psychologist, who specialises in the emerging field of Parental Leave Support, I have observed the following patterns to setting up a successful transition:

Become Informed – Find out about your organisation’s parental leave and flexible work policies – Ask don’t assume! You may be surprised at how much support there is available in this area. The Australia Government also has a range of resources such as the ‘Supporting Working Parents’ website.

Start an Early and Ongoing Conversation with your Manager – Being able to communicate your news with your manager as early as possible provides an opportunity to set things up well for yourself, your colleagues and your clients. Working together, you can decide when to announce your news to the broader organisation and address any specific requirements you may have. The involvement of your HR representative can also be an important resource at this time.

Take Time to Prepare – We know that those people who develop an effective Leave Plan are more likely to return to work after having a child. In line with best practice it is important to consider how you will handover over your responsibilities, how you would like to stay connected to the organisation while on leave and how you will address the logistics of leave (e.g., have you considered how you would like to notify your team that your new child has arrived?).

Recognise the Opportunities – While it is important to recognise the challenges of leave, it is important to also recognise the many opportunities that this transition presents. In our work, we argue that parental leave is a company’s most overlooked leadership development and human growth opportunity. For example, one question we often ask new parents is “What have you learned from work that you can bring to your role as a parent?” and “What have you learned from becoming a parent that you can bring back to work?”

For more detailed information regarding working through pregnancy please see here.

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/transition-from-working-person-to-working-parent/feed/0To return (to work) or not to return – or maybe something quite different.http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/to-return-to-work-or-not-to-return-or-maybe-something-quite-different/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/to-return-to-work-or-not-to-return-or-maybe-something-quite-different/#respondSun, 02 Oct 2016 11:24:42 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=6120The whole question of whether to return to work or not – is not always straight forward. For me personally, being at home with no family or friends (my family lives interstate and husband’s family is overseas), staying at home was extremely isolating. I looked forward to the mother’s group meeting once a week to have contact with others. I distinctly remember asking one of the mother’s – who do you fill in each day? The response was they had relatives, parent and in-laws that they strategically spread their visits out across the week – which was not an option […]

]]>The whole question of whether to return to work or not – is not always straight forward.

For me personally, being at home with no family or friends (my family lives interstate and husband’s family is overseas), staying at home was extremely isolating. I looked forward to the mother’s group meeting once a week to have contact with others. I distinctly remember asking one of the mother’s – who do you fill in each day? The response was they had relatives, parent and in-laws that they strategically spread their visits out across the week – which was not an option for me.

I missed the buzz, activities and social connections that my work offered. I had also worked very hard to get to a point in my career and part of me felt like I was ‘losing ground’ by being off work for a long period of time.

I also felt that my mind needed stimulating. I have never been a great reader, and loved my work, but at the same time I was torn as I didn’t want to leave my baby all week with someone else.

The days were long and lonely. I would find myself going to shopping centres for something to do, I did not even try on clothes there but simply took them home, as I had nothing else to do the next day but bring them back.

It was at this point that I realised there had to be another option.

Returning to work part time was best for me, and making arrangements when I could work from home was critical. I’m sure many of my relatives had negative opinions of my decision – as all of my cousins had taken years off work following the birth of their children. But keeping MY reasons for returning to top of mind was important – particularly in the face of criticism.

For some of my friends however, the thought of returning to work was filled with dread, and/or the thought of leaving their baby was too much to bare. For other mothers, they are not so fortunate that they can choose whether to work or not.

The golden rule here is that everyone and everyone’s situation is different. There is no right or wrong way. The only right way is what is right for you – your needs and your situation.

Having children and the challenges that this question about work brings, forces many to think creatively about other options that may be available to them. I know one friend of mine was informed whilst on maternity leave that her position was made redundant. Whilst shocked, angry and devastated at first, she completely turned this situation around, focussed on what she cared about and developed a new enterprise of her own.

The world of technology gives us a unique level of connection, flexibility and infrastructure that was never there before. Asking yourself what matters to you, what you enjoy doing and what skills you currently have, may just be the beginning of a new opportunity that you never considered before. It can also bring great flexibility to enable you to have the best of both worlds.

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/to-return-to-work-or-not-to-return-or-maybe-something-quite-different/feed/0My partner in crime: Meet Nami Clarkehttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/my-partner-in-crime-meet-nami-clarke/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/my-partner-in-crime-meet-nami-clarke/#respondThu, 15 Sep 2016 03:08:20 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=6105This month I’d like to introduce you to my friend, colleague and partner in crime – Nami Clarke. Nami is the creator of Little Tsunami – a fantastic blog dedicated to exposing the highs and low of motherhood. Here is a little piece from each of us about how this partnership came about. Nicole I met Nami at her studio in 2006 when I had a photo shoot with my first baby. From the outset Nami struck me as an incredibly warm and engaging person, with ever-ending energy and amazing creativity and a keen mind for business. At that stage Nami […]

]]>This month I’d like to introduce you to my friend, colleague and partner in crime – Nami Clarke. Nami is the creator of Little Tsunami – a fantastic blog dedicated to exposing the highs and low of motherhood. Here is a little piece from each of us about how this partnership came about.

Nicole

I met Nami at her studio in 2006 when I had a photo shoot with my first baby. From the outset Nami struck me as an incredibly warm and engaging person, with ever-ending energy and amazing creativity and a keen mind for business. At that stage Nami didn’t have children but I loved her photographic work and her ability to capture moments of those early months with a new baby. I distinctly remember as I viewed the photos from the shoot that we spoke about our united passion for capturing the essence of motherhood.

Our connection became stronger the following year, after Nami’s personal experience with postnatal depression and anxiety. Nami knew that I had devoted my career to this issue. When she first told me of her experience I could see the impact that this had had on her, and she knew that I understood. I suppose this was really the beginning of a journey for both of us – not that we realised it at the time.

After leading the perinatal area at Beyond Blue for over 12 years, I truly believed that this area needed a dedicated focus. I understood that postnatal depression and anxiety was part of the story – a small part but one that was critical for some mums and dads – so I developed COPE. COPE is the one stop shop for quality information about managing the emotional challenges that are faced on the journey into parenthood. There are so many things that contribute to us developing high expectations of what it means to become a mother or a father – and so many things about our culture and society that stop us talking about what it’s really like. Having two children of my own has also highlighted for me how isolating motherhood could be.

Nami’s openness and her honesty underpins her blog – Little Tsunami – and these qualities also capture the essence of what COPE is about. Her positive energy and vitality and our combined creativity has enabled the development of two soft, sensitive yet strong brands that is about supporting and empowering women and men at this highly vulnerable stage of life. Most of all I admire Nami’s combination of warmth, strength and courage – to engage others, speak out and let people know that they are not alone.

We are united by a cause and the essence of COPE’s message – though we come to that cause from different places. For Nami it is her personal story. For me it has come from years of research with people about their experiences coupled with my clinical background and work in the field for many years. We are both passionate, and full of ideas; whenever we come together we are both excited and ignited by these. Often I have a concept based on my understanding of where people may be at and how we can move things forward – but then Nami will often take this idea a step further and draws on her creative skills to bring this to life.

We are both committed to making other’s journeys easier, and along the way living our own dreams. That often means that you have to work extra hard but all that hard work pays off, because each day is truly fulfilling.

Currently most women don’t seek help until they get to the point that they cannot cope because they fear how they will be viewed or judged by friends, family or heath professionals. COPE will be the driver of change in a culture where high hopes and expectations surrounding parenthood are currently preventing people from being open and honest about the challenges and realities of parenthood. I want a create a culture in which we support one another on the good days but also the boring, the mundane and the bad days – the ones that no-one is talking about – or posting on Facebook.

Nami

I was in my late 20s and very much in baby-planning mode when I first met Nicole. Because I was soon-to-be mum we got chatting about all things pregnancy, birth and the emotional and mental health concerns that came with it. I had a huge interest in anything about life with newborn but of course I was certain that nothing like post natal depression would happen to me. Nicole reeled off stat after stat about and perinatal and postnatal health, the effects of postnatal depression on its sufferers, their family and the community. She struck me as super smart and as a woman on a mission. Mental health for women and mothers was clearly her passion.

I remember sitting down one night with my mum, sister and my big fat pregnant belly to watch Nicole speaking about postnatal depression on SBS’s Insight. By that time there had been flickers of depression but I just thought I was a bit hormonal; I was really just interested in the subject matter because PND sat within the realm of the mother experience – a shiny new adventure that lay ahead of me.

I was diagnosed with postnatal depression when my son (now six) was six months old. I thought I was just having a hard time adjusting to being a new mum. I’d worked hard at building my career and now I had to suddenly form a new identity outside of work, as well as deal with the demands of a newborn baby. I started to resent my husband who was able to return to his ‘normal’ life back at work each day. I didn’t deliberately resist getting help for the depression help but I suppose I felt I already had enough on my plate and didn’t have the strength to tackle the elephant in the room. I held on until I reached the point that I was both mentally and physically run down and really started to lose my grip on what could have been ‘easier’ days. Any chance of enjoying motherhood was slipping through my hands – I felt very disconnected from any joy in my life, and I felt disconnected from my child. There was one point that I actually told my husband that I would understand if he felt life without me would be easier. It was without a doubt one of the hardest experiences I’d endured.

Once my symptoms were being managed with medication and counselling, I rang Nicole. I explained what I’d gone through and how it knocked me for six. I wanted to help other women who were going through a similar experience. Beginning to share my story was the first step I took in doing this. I think this also helped me in my recovery, it gave me a bit of direction again.

Nicole is a woman on fire! I’ve never met someone with such a tenacity and drive and passion. She makes me look lazy even on my busiest days and I look up to her as a role model. To me she is someone who has been able to combine career and motherhood and thrive balancing both roles. Nicole practices what she preaches when she says life is too short. She is on a mission – don’t get in her way!

COPE is an incredible organisation and I am so glad it now exists for women, their partners and children. It is gathering so much momentum – you can feel it. It’s one of those things that are bigger than you; bigger than just your individual experience. It really is a community collective and there is an incredible energy that comes with something like that.

Last year I launched Little Tsunami, an online project where I interview mothers across the globe about their experience of motherhood. I started it just as a creative outlet, but the response has been amazing and I realised very quickly that as mothers we need a space where we can talk openly and honestly about our experiences – the good the bad and the ugly – without guilt or fear of judgement. Little Tsunami and COPE compliment each other so well – just as Nicole and I do! Each interview about motherhood that I feature on Little Tsunami references COPE’s data and statistical information – their website is an amazing resource for new parents. I am just so keen to get this message out there. I want other women know that if depression is part of their pregnancy experience or new role as a mother, they can put their hand up for help and be supported. The more we have the conversation, the more that we can shake the stigma, fear and shame that comes with the illness. Just because you have postnatal depression and you don’t love being a mum, doesn’t mean that you don’t love your children. It took me some time to separate my feelings of PND from the feelings I had for my kids but now I am very much back in a space where I love my role as a mum.

Together we’re on a mission to shake the stigma surrounding mental health and the emotional challenges of parenting. We are so excited that you’ve chosen to come along for the ride with us.

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/my-partner-in-crime-meet-nami-clarke/feed/0Why COPE and what’s this Guide all about?http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/why-cope-and-whats-this-guide-all-about/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/why-cope-and-whats-this-guide-all-about/#respondThu, 15 Sep 2016 02:43:22 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=6093I hope you have enjoyed your first edition of the Ready to COPE Guide this month. I thought you might find it interesting to understand a little more in this edition about COPE, why the charity was established, and how we can be here to support you along the way through motherhood. I established COPE in 2013 in order to put the spotlight on pre and postnatal (also called perinatal) emotional and mental health. After doing many, many interviews with aspiring, expectant and new parents it was very clear to me that people’s perceptions are often far from the reality […]

]]>I hope you have enjoyed your first edition of the Ready to COPE Guide this month. I thought you might find it interesting to understand a little more in this edition about COPE, why the charity was established, and how we can be here to support you along the way through motherhood.

I established COPE in 2013 in order to put the spotlight on pre and postnatal (also called perinatal) emotional and mental health. After doing many, many interviews with aspiring, expectant and new parents it was very clear to me that people’s perceptions are often far from the reality – a reality that no one was talking about. This is leaving thousands of women each year feeling like they are the only ones having a tough time or worrying constantly if they are doing everything ‘right’.

You only have to look at any ad in a magazine or on TV about pregnancy or motherhood to see where hope and expectations come from. In our COPE research with over 1,200 mums who did struggle through motherhood, most (87%) agree with the statement that ‘the way mums are shown in the media makes it look like everyone should be a perfect and happy new mum’.

This portrayal of parenthood perfection is not only influencing our expectations of what pregnancy and parenthood should and will be like, but also whether we talk openly about what we are really going through – for fear of how we may be viewed or judged by others.

Half of women (50%) in our study who had antenatal depression or anxiety said that they ‘hid their true feelings from family and friends whilst pregnant’. Whilst many women reported that they initially hoped that the symptoms would go away on their own, many reported not telling others as they felt ashamed. Further, over half of women (52%) described themselves as ‘a failure as a mother’, and 62% indicated that ‘feelings of guilt’ still remained with them – often many years later.

This shame, stigma and guilt increase isolation and reduce self-esteem. The silence surrounding these issues leaves individuals believing that they are the only one struggling to cope – making mental health problems even more severe and long lasting.

Shame and stigma, is also delaying help seeking. Almost three-quarters (74%) of women stated that they ‘did not seek help for depression or anxiety until they reached the point that they could no longer cope’. Even though pregnancy and the postnatal period is a time where women are in regular contact with health professionals, this opportunity is completely missed as shame and fear of judgement prevents women from talking openly and honestly with their health professional. Forty four per cent (44%) of pregnant women did not feel confident to tell their obstetrician/midwife how they truly felt during the pregnancy, and rates in the postnatal period are even higher.

It is time to do things differently.

It is time to present information in a way that is relevant, safe and acceptable. We need to challenge the portrayal of parenthood – at least in our own minds, and be mindful of the expectations we develop – as these may be unrealistic and even setting us up for failure.

It is important that we acknowledge that the journey to parenthood is easier for some than others – it is not a competition.

Finally, we all need to accept that this can be a challenging time, and it is no one’s fault if difficulties are faced along the way, nor is this a reflection you as a person or as a parent.

I hope this COPE Guide provides you with information and important insights along your journey throughout your pregnancy and your first year as a mother. It’s great to be with you on your journey…we welcome your feedback along the way. Dr Nicole Highet Founder and Executive Director

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/why-cope-and-whats-this-guide-all-about/feed/0Timely advice for new and expectant dadshttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/timely-advice-for-new-and-expectant-dads/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/timely-advice-for-new-and-expectant-dads/#respondSat, 03 Sep 2016 22:22:00 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=6088I was running a session for new parents – and I mean brand-new ones, just four to six weeks in, when one of the dads asked, “Why don’t they say how hard it is?’ He wasn’t having second thoughts about the whole parenting-gig, he was just exhausted in a way that he’d never experienced before. He wanted to be there for his new baby and otherwise he wouldn’t have bothered to come to the class. It has been 12 and 14 years since I was in his shoes but I know I felt pretty much the same as a new […]

]]>I was running a session for new parents – and I mean brand-new ones, just four to six weeks in, when one of the dads asked, “Why don’t they say how hard it is?’

He wasn’t having second thoughts about the whole parenting-gig, he was just exhausted in a way that he’d never experienced before. He wanted to be there for his new baby and otherwise he wouldn’t have bothered to come to the class.

It has been 12 and 14 years since I was in his shoes but I know I felt pretty much the same as a new dad. I kept waiting to get the weekend off when I’d have some time to rest and recuperate but with a newborn, it’s all hand’s on deck.

While the good news for parents is that it gets harder over time, it’s important to know that there’s a huge amount of brain-development in the early years, so really being-there for your children shapes their growing-brain.

There are three brain growth-spurts across the first six years and the degree to which you nurture your child will affect this development in positive or negative ways.

What this means for new parents is that some of the most important parenting can occur when you are at your most exhausted. If you then have a lot of stress on top of the exhaustion, then it’s a double-whammy that makes life that negatively affects your parenting.

Your newborn doesn’t want to exhaust you, they just have brief sleep-windows, and they wake frequently to feed and play, meaning that they spend lots of time sleeping, when they grown and put on weight, but just not in long overnight stretches, lik
e we do each night.

Or used to do!

Don’t worry, those days will come back and you’ll appreciate a good night’s sleep more than ever.

Until then, let’s get some strategies for managing life as a new parent, to help with exhaustion and stress.

If you have a look at the graphic image below, you’ll see that life has changed dramatically for you both. There’s a lot less ‘me-time’ and ‘couple-time’ than there used to be but a lot more time spent doing housework and parenting.

Sleep has a big bearing on how you function as a human-being. It suddenly becomes very clear about how it could be used as a form of torture! Being chronically tired not only affects the quality of your parenting, it reduces your ability to think as clearly as you once did, so ordinary things like problem-solving and communication now become so much harder.

And if like many of us, you weren’t the best communicator or problem-solver before kids, then Houston, we have a problem, because the challenges of parenting require us to be on our game.

We can tackle exhaustion by finding time for catch-up sleep. This might see you taking bubs out for a walk in the pram, when she wakes up at 5.30 or 6.00 am, so that your partner gets an extra hour’s sleep. Or they do the same for you at the end of the day and across the weekend. Work as a team to help each other get just a little extra sleep.

We can tackle stress and problem-solving by using this ‘multi-function’ communication tool. It’ll pretty much work across a lot of situations, by taking the blame out of situations and steering your discussions towards problem-solving:

STEP 1 Describe the issue When …………. Happened

STEP 2 Explain why that was a problem for you It was……………

STEP 3 offer a solution So can we……………….

Let’s se it in action around a dad’s frustration at his toddler repatedly coming back out, after being out to bed at night-time:

STEP 1 “When Ethan kept coming out.”

STEP 2 “It was really frustrating – it’s like we never get our time together anymore. I love him to bits but I need you as well.”

STEP 3 “So can you help me to deal with his coming out so I don’t lose it and can we also have some more ‘us-time’ so we stay close?”

In this example the dad explains his frustration as well as his desire to have more couple-time. His partner won’t feel like couple-time if he’s yelling at their son or at her. By using these three communication steps, he is more effective at problem-solving.

Finally, it also important to negotiate some ‘me-time’ where you (and your partner) get some time-out from parenting and housework to unwind – be that on the squash court, the footy field or going fishing.

Time will probably be a factor, so if you love golf, you might find you’ll play just 9 holes rather than 18. Try to do something active because exercise is a really effective stress-buster.

If stress is getting too big to handle on your own, it’s not a sign of weakness, but that you are in a tough place. That’ s the time to reach out and get some help. This might be practical help from family and friends, or professional help, to get you back on top of things.

With the right tools you’ll find that you can become very efficient at making the most of your catch-up sleep opportunities, as well as fitting a lot into your ‘me-time’. Your baby and partner will notice the changes in you and you’ll find yourself enjoying parenting.

Your baby needs you to love, nurture and play with them and the less-stressed you are, the better you’ll be able to do this. In return, they’ll love you right back – nice one papa!

Timothy O’Leary is the author of Dads Who Can – Love, Nurture, Play. For more information, please see www.dadswhocan.com

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/timely-advice-for-new-and-expectant-dads/feed/0The Truth about Women’s Experiences of Perinatal Mental Healthhttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/the-truth-about-womens-experiences-of-perinatal-mental-health/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/the-truth-about-womens-experiences-of-perinatal-mental-health/#respondWed, 10 Feb 2016 22:54:07 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=5710It is well established that the perinatal period is the time is a woman’s life when she is most likely to develop mental health conditions. As a result, often communication approaches have traditionally been positioned within this mental health/illness context. However, as outlined in this research summary, qualitative and quantitative research outcomes demonstrates that such an approach is likely to be counterproductive – as this does not fit with the mindset of consumers. Further the unique attributes of stigma within the perinatal context specifically highlight the importance of raising awareness and educating women and men in the context of ‘having […]

It is well established that the perinatal period is the time is a woman’s life when she is most likely to develop mental health conditions. As a result, often communication approaches have traditionally been positioned within this mental health/illness context.

However, as outlined in this research summary, qualitative and quantitative research outcomes demonstrates that such an approach is likely to be counterproductive – as this does not fit with the mindset of consumers.

Further the unique attributes of stigma within the perinatal context specifically highlight the importance of raising awareness and educating women and men in the context of ‘having a baby’ as opposed to the context of ‘mental health’ or ‘mental illness.

Background

Extensive qualitative research originally undertaken by beyondblue with women who had a history of perinatal (pre and/or postnatal) depression and/or anxiety, revealed a number of barriers to identification of symptoms, accessing of information and treatment.

Following, the extent to which these themes were reflected across the population was then evaluated by COPE: Centre of Perinatal Excellence. This was achieved through quantifying the observed themes (as identified in the qualitative research) through an online survey of over 1045 women who had a personal history of perinatal depression and/or anxiety.

This executive summary provides an outline of these research methodologies to demonstrate the extent to which these initial findings are represented across a broader sub-population and discusses their relevance to future approaches to communication in the context of perinatal mental health.

What delays early identification, information and help seeking?

Initial qualitative research indicated with women who had experienced pre or postnatal depression and/or anxiety did not seek help early. Rather help was often not sought until a crisis was reached or the women described themselves as reaching breaking point.

A range of reasons were able to be attributed this delay in identification and help seeking.

#1: Conditions are perceived to be conceptually different

Many women indicated that they did not view depression and anxiety in the perinatal period to be the same as that that may be experienced at other times of life. Contrary to clinicians’ views, consumers are more likely to view these conditions in the context of having a baby (a ‘complication’ of pregnancy or ‘having a baby’) as opposed to a mental health condition.

As a result, signs and symptoms are commonly viewed within the context of pregnancy, the baby blues, or adjusting to a new baby – as opposed to signs of clinical depression or anxiety.

“I just put it down to hormones and thought it would pass, six months after her birth I was still there.”

By attributing possible signs of perinatal depression and/or anxiety to the context of having a baby, the opportunity for detection (and early intervention) in pregnancy or early in the postnatal period is often missed. For example, almost half of those in a sample of 802 women did not recognise symptoms of depression/anxiety in pregnancy.

Often therefore, symptoms of depression or anxiety were only recognised in hindsight (and often not until the subsequent birth years later).

“I did not realise until I looked back that I had been feeling abnormally anxious over the first year of my daughter’s life.

#2: High expectations

Women also described holding high expectations of what pregnancy and motherhood were likely to be like.

“I wanted the experience to be so much – I wanted to make it lovely for everybody, so I kept playing the part. I felt like an actress in a role until I couldn’t hold it together any longer”

When, however these perceptions or ideals did not align with the reality of their experience, many women denied their symptoms (hoping they would pass). Women commonly described feeling ashamed and would not disclose to others.

“I wish I had got help earlier and told people, but I was too ashamed. Everyone around me saw me as a ‘coper’. I couldn’t tell them I wasn’t.

This finding is reflected across the larger sample of over one thousand women.

Here almost three quarters of women (74%) indicated that they did not want to admit that they were not coping, and did not seek timely support or treatment.

#3: Stigma

It is within this context that stigma surrounding perinatal mental health conditions may be considered unique – as one’s ability to cope is not only associated with them as aperson, but also as a mother and how she may be viewed or judged in this new role.

“I didn‘t want people to think that I couldn’t do something, that I wasn’t on top of everything and you’re supposed to be radiant and happy – like all those ads on TV. You see the mothers radiant and perfect and wonderful – which I am not”

The pressure to live up to personal expectations (and societal pressures) and fear of judgment by others means often women do not share or disclose to others.

“I feel that many women are ashamed to admit how that are honestly feeling and/or coping. As a result, when I asked other women what their experience was, the comments I received were all positive. It was only when I opened up by saying I wasn’t coping that other mothers opened up”.

Non-disclosure means that women are often left feeling that they are the only ones who may be struggling or needing help and support.

Meanwhile media images of motherhood ideals were reinforcing their feelings of inadequacy and failure – further compounding on their depression and anxiety.

“You feel like a failure – you have this beautiful baby and you are not able to provide for him”

I felt sad, really sad and like I’d failed, I was hopeless and not good enough to be a mother”

Within this context of motherhood, many women describe feeling angry, ashamed and/or guilty about experiencing their symptoms – at a time that was supposed to be such a positive time of life.

“I felt guilty as I wanted a baby for so long and when I finally had him, I felt anxious and depressed. I was so ashamed of myself”

“I felt so ashamed to feel this way, for feeling guilty and being seeing to have been a failure”

These feelings of guilt and failure were likely to remain for many years. In the larger sample, over half (52%) of women indicated that ‘they were a failure as a mother’ and 62% indicated that feelings of guilt still remain with them to this day.

Furthermore, stigmatising attitudes surrounding conditions such as postnatal depression and the perception of those affected being of danger to others (particularly babies), are likely further inhibit acceptance and disclosure. This includes disclosure to health professionals due to the fear that the baby may be removed from their mother’s care.

Implications for screening and disclosure

Many women fear how they may be judged by family, friends and even health professionals – which can also inhibit disclosure.

“I didn‘t show how I felt to the obstetrician – I was a successful, coping person”

These findings were also indicated in the larger quantitative sample where a significant proportion of women 44% were not confident to disclose how they truly felt to their antenatal healthcare professional.

In turn this also impacts on disclosure at the point of screening.

“I didn’t want people to think I was not coping, I didn’t tell the truth.”

“I wasn’t entirely honest in my answers with the nurse (felt like I would be judged).”

Key conclusions:

There is a strong desire for women to want to view possible symptoms of perinatal depression/anxiety as ‘normal’ and within the context of having a baby.

The context of motherhood leads many women to hold high expectations that are constantly reinforced by the media. This unique context places additional pressure on many women, and when these ideals are not met this can lead to denial, shame, grief and/or feelings of failure which ultimately compounds depression and anxiety.

Perinatal mental health is likely to be even more highly stigmatised due to underlying perceptions of the mother’s increased likelihood of harming her baby. Fears of how a mother will be judged by family friends and even health professionals, impacts on disclosure and screening practice.

To address these challenges, information surrounding emotional and mental health needs to be positioned within the context of ‘looking after yourself and managing the challenges that can come with having a baby’. This is in contrast to positioning information in the context of a mental illness, which is not likely to be to considered relevant (because information is viewed in the context of having a baby) or is likely to be too confronting for the consumer.

“I saw all of the brochures there, but I didn’t think that information would be pertinent to me, so I didn’t pay attention”

Dr Nicole Highet

Founder, Executive Director

COPE: Centre of Perinatal Excellence

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/the-truth-about-womens-experiences-of-perinatal-mental-health/feed/0#nofiltermum Rhianna – coping with bipolar disorder, IVF and PNDhttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/nofiltermum-rhianna-coping-with-bipolar-disorder-ivf-and-pnd/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/nofiltermum-rhianna-coping-with-bipolar-disorder-ivf-and-pnd/#respondSat, 21 Nov 2015 22:47:14 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=5693Rhianna, 37 is mum to Tomas, 8 months. Having been diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder at the age of 21, she was aware of the increased risk of experiencing postnatal depression. I have a mental health condition and am a bloody good mum and partner. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder when I was 21, after a deep depression, then a bombastic manic episode that still makes me blush with shame. Ten years of trying different combinations of medications as well as establishing a real work-life balance means I now appear to be “relatively normal”. For more information about […]

]]>Rhianna, 37 is mum to Tomas, 8 months. Having been diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder at the age of 21, she was aware of the increased risk of experiencing postnatal depression.

I have a mental health condition and am a bloody good mum and partner.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder when I was 21, after a deep depression, then a bombastic manic episode that still makes me blush with shame. Ten years of trying different combinations of medications as well as establishing a real work-life balance means I now appear to be “relatively normal”.

For more information about managing bipolar disorder in pregnancy click here

Having lived with a diagnosis of Bipolar for sixteen years, and previously endured many episodes of depression, I knew that postnatal depression was on the cards for me. I knew the potential dangers to mother, baby and partner. In the planning stages I sought out a psychiatrist who has specialist knowledge in bipolar medication and pregnancy. It took a year to adjust my medication to a suitable level to ensure I was on a stable footing before proceeding with pregnancy.

For more information about assessing your personal risk of developing emotional and/or mental health problems before having a baby, click here

The complications and the regular issues with pre-pregnancy, pregnancy, birth and postnatally all contributed in their special way to my experience of PND. My partner and I undertook IVF treatment; I injected myself with hormones and we attended far too many invasive doctors’ appointments. A few disappointments were thrown in for good measure. Half way through my pregnancy I had a colossal bleed and was taken to hospital in an ambulance, with no pants on! I can laugh a little now, but we were devastated to think we were losing our baby. I had two large bleeds and stayed in hospital for a total of one month, then four months on bed rest at home. I ceased work immediately.

After being diagnosed with preeclampsiaI had a caesarean birth one month early and we were told that our son, Tomas, would be admitted to the Special Care Nursery (SCN). I saw him for a minute and didn’t see him again for 24 hours as I was in post-operative madness. After a week in hospital we commuted daily to the SCN to feed our son through a tube in his nose. He weighed 2.6 kilos. We didn’t have a great deal of support around us and I was in physical and emotional agony.

When Tomas was two months old I realised I hadn’t told him I loved him. So I tried out an “I love you” and was surprised that it felt like a lie. I was having frequent vivid ghoulish daydreams about Tomas dying in awful ways, or me having a car accident. It wasn’t that I didn’t love Tomas but it just wasn’t that “as soon as you hold him…” feeling that everyone told me I would have. It took me quite a few months before I started to feel that “I’m so in love with my baby” feeling.

Four months postnatally I saw my regular psychiatrist he asked me the usual probing questions. My appetite was gone; I wasn’t socialising or accepting any help; I was crying a lot; I didn’t want to shower; I had some uncharacteristic fits of anger towards my partner; I didn’t feel confident caring for Tomas properly. My psychiatrist prescribed a monitored, gentle introduction of Zoloft to my existing medication regime. Within three weeks, I slowly started noticing the good things again. It put a lot of strain on my partner to help me through a depression as well as being a sleepless parent of a newborn. He dazzled me with his support.

For more information about supporing your partner who is experiencng emotional or mental health problems click here

COPE Facts about Bipolar Disorder and it’s management in pregnancy and following

Bipolar disorder is much less common than depression and anxiety, affecting between 1-3% of women.

Bipolar disorder is very serious and needs to be identified and managed early – especially in pregnancy or after having a baby.

This medical condition that requires treatment and management from a qualified medical health-trained professional, like a GP with expertise in the area or a psychiatrist.

For more information about bipolar disorder and it’s safe and effective management in pregnancy and following birth visit www.cope.org.au.

]]>http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/nofiltermum-rhianna-coping-with-bipolar-disorder-ivf-and-pnd/feed/0I couldn’t be left alone with our baby because it was so overwhelminghttp://copewp.azurewebsites.net/i-couldnt-be-left-alone-with-our-baby-because-it-was-so-overwhelming/
http://copewp.azurewebsites.net/i-couldnt-be-left-alone-with-our-baby-because-it-was-so-overwhelming/#respondThu, 19 Nov 2015 03:31:08 +0000http://www.cope.org.au/?p=5687Kylie is mum to Blake, 18 months. After a traumatic birth experience, she spent six weeks at a Mother and Baby Unit as she sought help to treat her postnatal depression. It got to the point that I couldn’t be left alone with our baby because it was so overwhelming. I was so broken that even the slightest cry would see me fall apart. Motherhood was the first thing I’d really ever tried that I’d failed at. Usually if I try something and stick with it I can get it. But I just couldn’t figure this out. I had so […]

]]>Kylie is mum to Blake, 18 months. After a traumatic birth experience, she spent six weeks at a Mother and Baby Unit as she sought help to treat her postnatal depression.

It got to the point that I couldn’t be left alone with our baby because it was so overwhelming. I was so broken that even the slightest cry would see me fall apart. Motherhood was the first thing I’d really ever tried that I’d failed at. Usually if I try something and stick with it I can get it. But I just couldn’t figure this out. I had so much guilt about how I was feeling. Having friends who couldn’t have children I knew how lucky I was, yet I didn’t want to do it anymore.

I had a fantastic maternal health nurse who never made me feel like I was being silly and supported me in seeking help through The Raphael Centre. With the help of my GP, The Raphael Centre was able to start my diagnosis and treatment for postnatal depression. But it wasn’t enough. I needed daily support and to have someone there, living it with me.

Blake was three months old when we applied to get into Werribee Mother and Baby Unit and by the time a place was available he was just over four months. I was so lost when I arrived. I had nothing left. I just felt indifferent; numb. I just wanted them to fix my kid. I didn’t look forward to anything except going to bed. I was not the person I was before having Blake. When we arrived I thought there was no way I was going to be able to stay but by the end of the first week I never wanted to leave. There weren’t any televisions in the rooms, only birthing beds to sleep on and awful hospital food, but there were also midwives around the clock, other mums going through similar journeys and experienced mental health staff. It was a really uncomfortable experience but without it I don’t know where we’d be. It saved us.

I never imagined that there would be such a change in me in the weeks I was in the Mother and Baby Unit. When I was ready to go home, I knew. I was full of hope again and excited for what life might be. I remember the stigma around postnatal depression when I first came to terms with it. I was so worried about what people would think of me if we spent three days in a sleep school. Now I have no issues telling strangers I spent six and a half weeks in a mental hospital. It’s all about understanding and knowing that it’s ok.

For more information about overcoming the stigma and seeking help click here

The situation brought my husband and I closer. When I was falling apart my husband would step up and rock our screaming baby for hours overnight and then get up at 6am and go to work. Looking back at those moments makes me so grateful for the family and support network I have around me. I’ll never be able to thank those enough that were there for me during that time.

For more information for dads about supporting your partner with PND click here

For a long time I said I would never have another baby. Now I’m slowly coming around to the idea. I was so terrified of going through it all that again that it just didn’t seem worth it. I know that if we decide to have another child I could end up with postnatal depression again but I also know that we will go into it more experienced, with more skills and tools to get through it.

COPE Facts about Stigma and PND

 Stigma is a major factor that prevents mums speaking up or seeking help early.

COPE research reveals that expectant and new mothers hold high expectations about what the experience of having a baby will be like – usually influenced by media portrayals of motherhood.

When expectations are not met or if things don’t go to plan often feelings of failure and shame prevent women from confiding with others for fear that they will be judged as individuals or in their role as a mother.

The impacts of shame, stigma and fear of disclosure is preventing women from seeking support from others, delays help-seeking and ultimately compounds mental health conditions – often leading to the conditions becoming more severe.

For more information about managing expectations, overcoming stigma, knowing when to get help and where to access safe and effective help visit www.cope.org.au.