Cheating is physical. Fantasy is all in the mind. If fantasy is cheating there is nobody who can claim not to have cheated. In my opinion cheating is specifically doing something that you and your lover/spouse/significant other have agreed not to do with other people. It seems impossible to me not to have sexual fantasies about other people, they flit in and out of my mind all day long. I have fantasies that I'd never actually want to happen in real life so fantasies aren't wishes. They aren't intentions to have sex, they are just thoughts about sex.

Joined: 11/21/2009Posts: 674Location: Stopping the war 'tween Harold and Kumar

(waves at Vixen darling... hello!!!)

NO!!! NO!!!! NO!!!!

I fantasise about what it would be like to move back to Canada. Doesn't mean I am actually going to do it. Doesn't mean I am actually not going to do it too. I fantasise about finally climbing that sleeping dragon mountain to the south of the city. I fantasise about some married men. I will always fantasise about what sex would be like with God/god. I fantasise about holding my sister by the hair and dipping her into a lava pit when she gets on my nerves.

But just because I fantasise about these things..... doesn't mean these things will come to pass. These are just some of the thoughts that race through my head.

Cheating on the other hand... the act. The taking the fantasy from being a thought and putting it into reality. Living life and enjoying life are two different things... just need to figure out how to do both at the same time to live it right!

Woman... GO FLY A KITE!!!!! Take a slideshow walk with me on a walk through the parks of Inner Mongolia, China. Then enjoy the tale of a very traditional day in the life of a white Woman in China.

Well, the other morning as hubby and I woke up, we were both coming out of the deep sleep and as it happens we were both sort of playing with ourselves. As I realized he was doing the same thing, I gave him a grin and we just kept at it, finishing just a minute or two apart. We didn't say a word, we just got up, took a shower together where we kissed and caressed each other a bit with silly grins on our faces and as we walked downstairs with the baby in my arms he looked up and said "Keri Russell" and I said "Jon Bon Jovi" and we just dissolved into gales of laughter. It's not cheating, it's a normal fantasy/masturbation thing. If he didn't even think about another woman once in awhile, I'd be very worried. After all, my grandmother said she knew that's when my grandfather was dying, when in the hospital he didn't even notice the beautiful nurse or make a comment.

John Bon Jovi Is hot. i don't blame you.Thinking of someone else is harmless as long as it stays there and doen't interfere with real life.

No, it's not cheating. That's like being punished for 'thought crime.'

Now, if you ACTED toward those fantasies, seeked to pursue them, then it would be cheating!

I think exactly the same.A fantasy is just our thoughts but nothing else.If we tried to make those fantasies real then it might be cheating, depending on our methods to pursue them and the type of 'fantasy' as well.

No, fantasising is not cheating. If you want to go down this road then "dreaming" is cheating as well. Having the person fantasised about participate, swap ideas until something intimate was reached, like cybering each other i would put in the realm of cheating but that depends on what is and what isn't allowed and is already agreed upon with said partner.

No way, i read in a magazine once that apparently 75% of men and sixty-something % of women fantasize about someone else (celebrtities, pornstars, fit guy or girl in the supermarket etc) during sex. Make of this what you will.

It doesn't mean anything bad, it's just the way it is. It's natural.

However, if you're thinking about having sex with someone in particular - especially someone you/both of you know all the time... that's a bit off. as long as you do nothing about it, i guess it's ok!

[walks in and tries to be completely different from everyone else]Well, if your fantasies gets in the way of the relationship, couldn't that be considered cheating?You just want to be with your fantasy, not even once including your partner in the thoughts you have.

Is fantasising about someone else, when you're on top of your partner and screaming your partners name, cheating?

Fantasizing about someone that you talk to, whether on-line or in person while you are in a relationship with someone else isn't cool. It may be harmless but I think it's a passive aggressive behavior. Like you're looking for praise by flirting with someone else when you should find that with your partner. The sky's the limit if you are unattached. I never fantasize about being w/ celebs. It's usually a specific guy that I know or else someone I've invented for an erotic story. That guy usually has blue eyes.

No fantastising and cheating are two completely different things in my opinion - I know my fiance fantasies about Angelina Jolie but that's not cheating to me as he's never gonna actually have a chance with her. Ditto with me fantasising about Johnny Depp.

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