Meanwhile, here in America it's Bike Month, which means cyclists are now worth 50 points to drivers instead of the usual 25--and if the cyclist wasn't wearing a helment you also get six bucks off your next oil change at Jiffy Lube!

Just make sure you get your activation code from the "investigating officer" (that's a good one) at the scene of the "accident."

It's also Bike To Work Day in some cities, which means your co-worker will most likely show up at the office with a giant sweat stain on his back after having sixteen near-death experiences and swear to never, ever do that again.

More importantly, it's been something like twenty years since I've proctored a quiz, so I'm administering one herewith. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right that's great, and if you're wrong you'll see bicycling safety.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and if you're racing in the Giro d'Italia watch out for pink sheep.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

1) Fill in the blank:

The effects of human-induced climate change are being felt in every corner of the United States, scientists reported Tuesday, with water growing scarcer in dry regions, torrential rains increasing in wet regions, heat waves becoming more common and more severe, wildfires growing worse, and forests dying under assault from __________________.

6) According to a recent review, the above mountain bike tire excels in wet, sloppy conditions thanks to its large volume and ample side knobs, though it tends to queef air under hard cornering when run tubeless.

I am from the Creek-Folk Tribe. Careful though, lots of other fun activities happen down by the creek aside from metal detection.

Until you have had some hot post MTB Ride action on a mossy foot bridge you have not fully experienced nature. I asked her once "When did you really fall in love?" She said, "When you took me in the woods by Gatlinburg and did me on that big rock by the Little Pigeon River."

Holy shit, if anyone hasn't watched the metal detector video in it's entirety, you need to do so. Or at least the first three minutes, which contains quite possibly the greatest moment in the history of cinema.

I would totally watch that show. Nobody's actually invented the smellovision yet, have they? Okay, it's safe. Anyone know how a metal detector picks up shark's teeth? Are there shark dentists out there filling shark cavities?

You know, if Jesus were to come back to earth today he wouldn't be whitening his teeth and hanging out at some charismatic mega church singing that god-awful crap they sing there, no, he'd be trawling canals for gold and sharks' teeth boisterously farting the whole way.

============================================Svein Knutsson - Wikipedia, the free encyclopediaen.wikipedia.org/wiki/Svein_KnutssonSvein Knutsson (Old Norse: Sveinn Knútsson) c. 1016–1035, was the son of Cnut the Great, king of Denmark, Norway, and England, and his first wife Ælfgifu of ...‎============================================

I think that Metal Detector Man was not just idly passing wind. No, he was strategically activating a personal bio-fueled alligator repulsion system (PBARS) and judging by the lack of reptiles present, it seems to be quite effective.

"workin upstream is a whole lot of fuckin work". Just like climbing is in cycling. Maybe if he quit smoking it wouldn't seem like so much work and he'd find pirate gold. To bad someone upstream didn't send down an inflated gator. At least he found a cooler that looked like it had been someones bait bucket.

I think it is very poor form for you to mention someone named Marco Pantani, and the problems he may or may not have had with his erythrocyte volume fraction.

I thought Q-factor was the width of the crank horizontally between the pedals, but apparently it is also my knowledge, or lack of it, on the life and, I find, the death of someone named Marco Pantani, who had the poor manners to explode his heart in a barricaded hotel room, instead of honorably, like Tom Simpson, on the upper moonscape of Mont Ventoux.

I guess I am just so sick of professional bicycle racing, with the season starting up for the spectators, and professional racing just seeming to suck doping to it all the time, like terrible leeches.

I also hate the auto-spellcheck correct feature of my computer correcting the obviously misspelled words when I'm trying to prove I'm not a robot...

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Dat guy in da creek. What da fuck he do wid dat wand thing he wave about. I tink dat guy in da creek is maybe a crazy guy. I sure one guy can find more good shit in da dumpster fer sure and not get eaten by fish lizards.

I thoroughly enjoyed metal detector guy's video, but I reckon if they gave him a TV show they'd ruin it by trying to make it more TV friendly.

I rode some epic new gravel today, a beautiful old winding rural road named "Ridgelands Rd". Unfortunately I was riding in my Land Cruiser work ute, not on a bicycle.

Well, maybe it's a good thing I was on 33 inch mud terrain tyres and steel ladder chassis, as apparently 26 inch wheels and aluminium frame on epic gravel would most likely have resulted in SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH, of the scranus.

I did pass a cyclist earlier while still on the tar. I slowed right down and was all courteous and shit. Dickhead was riding down the middle of the lane and wouldn't move over. No wonder people hate us. Get off the road you fucking cyclists!

But I take a meter and expect drivers to pass me safely (that means GIVING me a meter) when they can. So many drivers don't give us enough clearance, and I refuse to scrunch up on the very edge of the road just so they can speed along on their merry way.

when driving I always give a meter+ ..but there are some riders in my town, all from a certain club, who either don't trust drivers, or who have inner road rage; they come over to the double yellow line when I try to pass, instead of allowing me a half lane & 4 feet clearance ...I can understand that they don't want to get crowded if I see a car coming the other way...this morning I passed a three-rider paceline ...I waited through 2 blind turns, following a respectful distance, I then went to pass during a brief straight stretch that was still double yellow...they moved from the shoulder to within a foot of the double yellow...I'm used to them now..I stayed ~ 20 mph & slowly passed them, in the left lane, & took my sweet time until I was a few car lengths clear & slowly eased into the lane...year ago one of the club did that & I had to jump on the gas to clear him before a blind hill...I can't stand the sleepy hollow club..thank you for listening..if you had a big ride Saturday I hope you took some pictures & maybe put them in your blog

Inconsiderate/aggressive dick bag motorists are going to be dick bags no matter where in the lane cyclists ride.

I don't think it's an excuse for cyclists riding like dick bags.

I understand the theory of taking the lane in an urban setting, I do it myself on occasion. But, when I'm riding on the open road I keep up my end of the deal by staying as far the fuck out of the way as I can. Whatever the motorist do is up to them, many show me equivalent courtesy.

Riding a bike with sensible tyres helps me do my bit to share the road. Most "road bikes" I see out there are set up as what is better described as "road racing bikes" and judging by the way they are ridden are unfit to share many of the roads out there, their pilots unwilling to risk a puncture or be subjected to the rougher ride over on the side. It would be like driving a Formula One car on public roads and having to drive all over the place to avoid every little bump and hollow and think this is ok.

If you can't ride within a couple inches of the painted line when traffic is passing, or better yet, move off onto the verge if it is just the occasional car, it's probably because you have succumbed to the fantasy that you are riding in some grand race that everyone around you cares about, or should care about, and that the people in the cars lining up behind you should feel privileged to witness the spectacle.

Fuck the Sleepy Hollow club, and their honorary members around the world.

Actually, taking your meter is about line of sight and safety for everyone involved, not about being a dick. If you are crowded to within an inch or two of the line on a road without a shoulder you A have no room to maneuver and B are not fully visible to traffic behind you. I don't mind riding closer to the edge of the road where there are no parked cars, but when there are I stay the fuck away from them because I love my life.

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!