Handling Conflict in a Romantic Relationship

No matter how much you love your partner, there are moments when you are going to be at odds with each other. No matter how trivial your disagreement or conflict might seem, you need to be able to communicate clearly with your partner. You need to be able to handle conflicts in way that do not escalate the situation. Conflicts often require you to set aside your ego and talk things through clearly. The best relationships are the ones where both parties aren’t afraid to talk to each other about something that is bothering them.

Professional psychic readers deal with clients all the time who seek counsel about some conflict that has arisen with a romantic relationship. Often a psychic will recognize that the client doesn’t need some special insight into their lover, wife, husband or partner – what the client needs is to learn how to deal with conflict in a mature, fair manner. Often it doesn’t take a psychic to see that the client needs to learn how to effectively resolve conflicts. And, often, learning how to deal with conflict is a path to strengthening a relationship. A healthy relationship will have conflicts. A conflict free relationship is most often a relationship without growth. A relationship where conflicts can be resolved quickly, peacefully, is a one that has maturity and depth.

What we are talking about here are good, old fashion disagreements. Nothing more. If a relationship has degenerated to the point of abusiveness, persistent anger, continual sorrow or disappointment, then you don’t need a psychic to tell you that the relationship is in trouble. When two people who behave more as if they are possessed of hate than love, then it’s no longer a loving relationship. When a relationship goes from romantic to destructive it is best to admit it and deal with it. What we are talking about here in this article dealing with typical conflicts that arise from time to time in romantic relationships. With any two people there will always be some conflicting interests.

Be Able To Both Talk And Listen

Some people are great at talking. Listening, not so much. Others are great listeners, but good luck getting them to reveal what they feel about what they hear. A good relationship requires that communication flows both ways. Something that might help is the Five Minute Rule. You get to tell your partner, UNINTERUPTED, what you think and feel about a point of disagreement for five minutes. Then, your partner gets to tell you what they think and feel about a point of disagreement for five minutes, UNINTERUPTED. Lastly, you let the whole topic go for a while. Let what you said, and what you learned, sink in.

In a way, what the Five Minute Rule does is force people to at least try and walk in the other person’s shoes for a time. What is often surprising is that solutions can appear quickly once both people get a better idea of each other’s perspective. Sometimes the whole disagreement can dissolve when it is discovered there was a misunderstanding, not a disagreement.

Keep Disagreements Private

Do you want to build trust? Then, keep disagreements and conflicts private. Don’t drag friends and relatives into the issue either by airing your discomfort for all to hear publicly. Don’t think that if you publicly bring up a disagreement you can either ‘shame’ your partner into agreeing OR that you can take some sort of vote and hope the issue is settled in your favor … especially if you trap your partner with a group of your friends and/or relatives. This is a path to distrust, not conflict resolution.

If you want to look for advice, fine. But keep it discreet and private. If you just want someone to agree with you, be aware that there are always people who will agree with you, but that does nothing to solve the disagreement or conflict with your partner. We all need friends and relatives with whom we can talk with privately. The goal should be to get a fresh perspective or if there is a third way through the disagreement. In this area a psychic may have some positive input. Perhaps there is something going on beneath the surface you are not aware of? This might include what’s going on with you. At any rate, pick your advisors carefully and work to find a way through the conflict with your partner. This is about the two of you working together to resolve issues – not you and somebody else working through the issues and cutting your partner out.

Create Peace Treaties Quickly – Don’t Ignore The Problem

In a lot of relationships, people don’t address things that bother them because they are afraid of speaking their mind. Over time, these minor issues turn into resentments and deep wounds. These problems can manifest themselves in the form of catastrophic arguments that cause irreparable damage to the relationship. If you’re feeling hurt or annoyed, you should find ways to communicate it to your partner. Don’t sulk and indulge in passive-aggressive behavior and expect your partner to magically figure out what is bothering you.

If you have a problem, tell your partner. If no immediate solution seems to appear, then agree to disagree for the time being. Provide reassurance with a kiss, a hug, a kind word. The universe has a tendency to provide answers once the questions are well formed. Never turn the issue into a competition where you must defeat your opponent – unless your disagreements involve sports and competition. By letting your partner know, in a calm reassuring manner, that you are disturbed by something is the first step in finding a solution.

Try And Keep Emotions Under Control (But Recognize They Are There)

Conflicts often elicit strong emotional reactions, which can make it difficult to keep your cool when you have a problem with your partner. You might find the conversation quickly devolving into a shouting match. Generally, shouting matches only results in hard feelings, not solutions. And, there are people who find that emotional arguments are unacceptable (they likely will just walk away rather than engage). Others feel that a little emotional release is how relationships work. You will need to figure out how you and your partner feel about emotional expression when conflicts arise.

The bottom line is that there is a way you can work out your problems without being hurtful and vindictive. Yes, you will need to have some uncomfortable conversations with your partner, but in the long run, you will both be happier and stronger as a couple. That’s the ultimate goal: To be able to confront issues together and feel stronger for it.

When you find yourself getting extremely defensive or agitated when discussing an issue, take a minute to cool off before you respond. If you are in a face-to-face discussion, create a break – say you want a cup of tea and go make one, or say you need to think for a moment about what your partner just said. Before responding angrily, create a break, breath, then resume the discussion. If you’re communicating over text it is VERY important to STOP, pull yourself together, and double check what you’ve written before you hit ‘Send’.

When a disagreement begins to enter into highly emotional territory, here is something you might want to ask yourself: Why does this particular issue raise such an emotional response? Many issues are easy to understand why you are angry or frustrated. Still, try and grab a hold of exactly what you are upset about. What is the emotion? Is it anger? Jealousy? Fear? See if you can understand, within yourself, what the emotion is and why the emotional response is so strong.

If you partner is also getting emotional, the next step is can be a bit more tricky. Quietly, gently try and understand why your partner has such an emotional response. Without escalating the situation, try and find out why your partner is getting upset. For example, say your partner demands that you contact them anytime you are going to be late getting home or meeting them. You find that request domineering and pushy and it becomes an issue. Exploring the emotions underneath may reveal your partner becomes fearful when you are late because someone they once loved never arrived due an accident. You, on the other hand, had a father who was overly domineering, and when you feel someone restricting your freedoms, you rebel.

By seeing the underlying emotions involved in an issue (on both sides), and the circumstances that generated those feelings, you may quickly discover a harmonious, peaceful solution. Much depends on if the relationship has progressed to a point where discussing these personal feelings can be discussed objectively.

Do you have questions about your relationship? Give Psychic Sumaria a call at 1-866-327-9032.

Relationships aren’t always sunshine and butterflies. Every relationship has to wade through some rough weather, but the ones built on trust and honest communication eventually make it through. You won’t always agree with everything another person says, even if they are your ideal match. Accept that you will have to face some conflicts, and prepare yourself in advance so you can tackle them effectively.

By utilizing some of the ideas above you may discover that you can begin working through romantic conflicts peacefully. You can start finding answers, together, that make your relationship stronger. Should you find you need some ‘special’ help with a romantic partner (possibly insights into what may be blocking a relationship from progressing, or, why a once solid relationship seems to be crumbling) a good psychic reader may be of value.

A couple of readers to contact are Psychic Sumaria Jones. Sumaria is a gifted clairvoyant who is very compassionate. You can reach her at 1-866-327-9032 (toll free USA and Canada). You might also check out Psychics Directory Love Psychics Page where you’ll find a selection of psychic advisors.