Adventures In The Mind

Tuesday, 29 May 2012

You ask for answers that I can't yet give to you. That would also spoil my fun, and I am all about having fun. I stretch my hand out to those I feel can, entertain me. Those who can put on a show and give me exhilaration instead of wallowing in my own boredom. Someone that will have the blood rushing through my veins, pulse pounding, and skin tingling with excitement as they struggle. Their trials and tribulations, only a lead into the violent and slow death that I have personally concocted for each and every single victim. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.

Unfortunately this time my "fun" must be different. The truth is I am getting older, and I don't know how much longer He will allow me to continue to take his minions and prey to run my games. Lately he has been trying to interfere with my plans, use my own pawns against me. It only makes for more interesting scenarios, more leeway to do as I wish. He wants to fight me so be it, but I wonder if he understands that it will only serve to heighten my enjoyment. I have no need to live once this game is finished, however,

THE GAMES MUST NOT STOP

I must find a way for all this to continue after I am gone. I have already made the decision that I need a successor to my play, a fresh mind to spruce up the worn out and tired ideas. This game is for that single purpose. I will take the very last shattered and broken soul, hands still coated in fresh blood, and shape them into my image. Make them an heir to my vast empire. Before He kills me I must succeed. This is not simply a matter of legacy, of leaving behind my will when I am gone. No. This is about showing someone else what the world truly has to offer, finding a way to make sure my efforts have not gone to waste. I know I am far from immortal, but I am making sure that this kind of game will always be played.

Tall, Dark, and Slender can no longer stop this plan, not only will I not allow it, but a successor will be named with or without me being alive. The pieces have already been assembled for this last round. I am excited to see who will break under the pressure, who will fight their way through, and who will seek refuge in their mind, searching for a better time to forget the gruesome deaths around them. I've seen all kinds of things from the people thrown into my arena, for often their kindness turns to brutality. Just the thought of putting this into motion has me shivering in delight. I rule this little world, like a madman in control of people trapped in a snow globe, fighting to survive. I want to see them let go of those morals they hold so dear in their daily lives

There I go again, almost spilling all my plans before the main event. I should learn not to rant so much and keep some things a surprise. I suppose that more things will be found out as it is told how my games moved forward. Sit back, relax, and enjoy as my master plan is brought to light. This all went on under your noses and you never knew a thing. Just that thought has me giggling.

Friday, 11 May 2012

What is wrong with people? Do they have to be dragged kicking and screaming into the streets to see? Sheep lead to the slaughter on pretty words, forced through the fires until their charred bodies are all that remain. It hurts to give everything and receive nothing in return. Keeping one eye open while you sleep and constantly having your heart closed to keep it from being torn out gets tiring and fast. Why can't people be true and honest? Why do good people have to suffer for the falsities of others?

I now knew I needed help. Doing this alone...it just couldn't be done all by myself. I didn't have the will to keep this going. I had sworn up and down I wouldn't involve anyone. I couldn't keep both them and myself safe, but I would lose my mind if I kept this inside any longer. There was a small problem however. Who could I trust? My father? Surely not. He was still locked up for attempting to cut my life short, and I doubted he wanted to see me now, especially to pull him into a world that could only mean death. A friend? I didn't have many friends to begin with, and over my past weeks of self imposed exile I certainly hadn't made any more. Any way I looked at it I was certainly alone.

All thoughts of getting food to nourish my ailing body were gone. I needed to get inside, somewhere safe and away from prying eyes. Of course, no where was really safe, but I was headed towards my dorm room as fast as I could manage it. I could feel the shivers passing through my body, the outside now seeming far too large. There were far too many places for people to hide out in these wide spaces, and in the shadows cast by lights on buildings. I had never before realised how freaky and creepy campus was at night. I suppose that's because I never had anything to fear before, nothing truly scary chasing at my heels.

I bundled myself through the front entry of my residence, fumbling with my key to open up the door to the stairwell. I bounded up the three flights, emerging into the hall and knocking past people on my way past the lounge towards my room. I got a few stares, seeing how pale and skinny I was getting. Now I was never really a body builder, but I had a nice slim build, and a distinct six pack before all this had started. I figure that's why I wasn't dead already. I jammed my key into my door, throwing myself into the room and slamming the door behind me, turning the lock as quickly as possible. I heard a ding from the direction of my laptop and I perked up, swinging around and glaring at the device. That thing had started it all, had sealed my fate. I clicked the mail button, retrieving the email from cyber space and staring at the words as if I could perhaps make sense of them if I kept looking at it harder.

I had no idea what this letter would do to me, how it would certainly impact my future.

"I know you. Your circumstance isn't all that different from my own and I am guessing at this point you could use a friend. Do what you want this invitation, but I think I may be able to be of some help to you.

Your Friend,

N"

N....my new ally? An enemy in disguise? There was only one way to find out. I hit reply.

Tuesday, 8 May 2012

I suppose the more I run, the closer I get to my inevitable end, the more I start to see the true world. The sheep so easily lead to their slaughter on only pretty lies, they have earned my pity. I am not running to save myself, but to warn you, to give others the chance I never had. I have come to the realization that since I became involved in this whole series of events, my time was limited. Mortality is nothing to be scared of, and I am willing to die. Perhaps that is why at this point I am still alive, staring up at the stars and taking in the beauty of our universe.

They were watching. I now knew it as I stared through the blinds of my window. I hadn't been out in days, but nothing had bothered flicking past my window. There were no shadows in the corner of my eye to warn me of my impending doom. The world just seemed to move past me at it's own pace, and I wondered if I was stuck, bogged down by my fear. People seemed to be concerned, knocking on my door, sending me messages, but I ignored them. If I explained what I feared, they wouldn't understand, and as I had read, it would just drag them into his construct. I moved from the window, pacing my darkened room once more, stuck within my own thoughts. I would need to move soon, being locked up was no good for the body, and certainly not for my mind.

I hopped into the shower, washing off the dirt of days spent thinking and nights spent fearing the worst would come for me. It felt good to be back to something a little more like a normal life. I wondered what had made me fall so far, take something that was just a scary story so seriously. There had been no indication that it was real at all, so perhaps I had made myself anxious for nothing. Hopping out of the shower and wiping off the condensation from the mirror, I wiped at the stubble on my jaw. Just how long had I stayed here, locked up with no chance to see light, not eating. I was certainly skinnier, and the need to eat had left me, but that only hinted at how hungry I was. Oh god...what had I done to myself?

I walked out of the bathroom, head reeling with the revelations that it wasn't anyone else killing me right now. I was killing myself with fear and worry. I pulled on a pair of loose sweatpants and a t-shirt, with a typical College hoodie pulled over top. I needed to eat, even if it was something light. I stood at the door to my dorm room, hesitating. I didn't know if I was ready to come back out into the real world. I had retreated so far into my head that I wasn't sure if anything could ever be right again. I hadn't been that deep before, even in my childhood, which as I said was less than desirable. It took me twenty minutes to work up the courage to walk out the door and lock it tight behind me.

Walking out of the dorms, I noticed the pallor to my skin in the half light as twilight sank around the buildings of campus. I walked towards the student centre, towards the successful completion of my quest for food. It took me a while to notice the increase in foot traffic around me. It was gradual, hardly worth bothering with until I was almost crushed on all sides by the hoodie wearing band. A white hot band of fear struck through me, and I tried to push out of the circle, but hands pulled and pushed me back into the circle. I clawed at these people, lashed out and tried to fight, but nothing seemed to faze them as they brought me closer and closer towards their centre, towards the biggest one of them all, face hidden behind a mask. It spoke softly, but the voice sounded like something I had never heard before, grating and unpleasant, but silky sweet like honey. This is what he told me.

"He is coming for you. He knows who you are, and you can not deny fate."

And then they were gone, leaving only the chill on my skin and a fearful sob on my lips.

Tuesday, 24 April 2012

Running...it seems I never stop doing that one simple thing. Honestly, you would think that someone like me would have stayed put, finally in the perfect spot, no longer alone.

Strangely enough, being alone was all I wanted.

As I hit the strip, where my story started, I finally slowed my pace. The rain poured down, soaking me to the bone and I sat and watched all the happy couples, arms linked and so close to each other they could have been one person. I wondered absentmindedly if they knew that their world wasn't truly theirs to control. That there are monsters that go bump in the night like your parents told you in stories, and they are 100% real. No one really cares to notice that shadow in the corner of their eye however.

I tried to clear my head, hoping that the bright lights of the strip would clear away the darkness that was locked in my mind. The negativity that if I let spread would swallow me whole once again and plunge me back into that world of despair that I had no interest in revisiting. I wiped the rain off my face, for the first time feeling the chill that penetrated my being, bringing me back to the realization that what ever I had seen, where ever I had been, the true me was locked away somewhere I didn't really want to bring myself back to.

The real me would always be the street child, avoiding the officers that were looking for me to bring me back to another home. Always starving by myself, doing anything to scrounge up the few dollars to get something that wasn't in the trashcans for a meal. The kid who fought his hardest against his unfortunate circumstances to get where he was now. I was a survivor, nothing more, nothing less. So in this tricky situation, where once again my life hung in the balance, I decided that I would do anything.

Anything to Survive.

Anything to Push Forward

Anything to Live

I spun, turning my back on the happiness and brightness of the road of deep sin and greed, the symbol of my past, and walked back towards my apartment. I had a feeling that I would be coming back many times to think and put everything that I learned about myself and this new world order into perspective. I wouldn't let this stop my life, I wouldn't give in...would I?

Every step closer to my dorm room I doubted myself , doubted my choices, but once I picked a path I could not stray. If I had to fight, I would fight. If I had to run, I would run, and if I had to stay put? Well I would take my normal spot among society and wait for my turn to have my battle with the monsters of the shadows and the night. I knew for certain however that this was my fight alone, that if I involved anyone else they would suffer for my follies, and I would suffer for theirs...at least at first those were my thoughts. As you know things change over time, and I am no exception to that rule.

As I got back to my room I knew that something was wrong. The door was partially open, and the light of my computer shone from inside. First of all, I would have never left my room open, even in total fear. Second, the computer would have normally been gone...you come to expect that if you leave your room unlocked and unattended. Carefully I let my hand fall on the doorknob, taking a deep breath and forcing the door open.

What I found was nothing but a torn apart room, my clothes thrown around, everything all over the floor. Drawers flung open, things on shelves knocked over. A grotesque photo was opened on my computer, and I cringed quickly closing the page. My jaw fell open as I noticed something reflected in the screen of my monitor. I quickly turned, taking in the giant red words on the wall, glaring at me. I knew this was a warning.

Sunday, 22 April 2012

Have you ever felt like you were dreaming, even though you were wide awake?

Things can't be real, but in the back of your head the mantra repeats it's self. "This is real. This is real. This is real."

There is nothing you can do to change what you are seeing, nothing will bring you back to the times that were so calm and predictable, for you already know. What has been seen, can not be unseen.

As I said, this all started with a harmless link. I sat in my room, darkened except for the light of my lamp. The click of my mouse and the tapping of keys was deafening in the silence of the night, but I was absorbed. It was impossible to turn away from. Next thing I knew it was almost dawn, and the studying I was supposed to do had been untouched. So much for the test I was supposed to have. There was something strange about this lore that my friend had sent me...it seemed to me this was far more than just the stories my friends laughed at as hoaxes. It must be real, at least that is what my sleep deprived brain was yelling at me. I decided to ignore it's warning and get some rest.

Class went decently enough, the test not as hard as I believed it to be. I spent the day out, laughing, partying, trying anything to get the topic out of my head. It seemed to be a small itch, always present, begging me to read and become a part of the larger story. Eventually I returned, the pull to hard to escape, my own curiosity a twisted and warped creature wishing to pull me deeper into the new found source of despair.

I clicked the link again, ready to delve back into what I now know is his own personal playground. The list where he can choose his unsuspecting victims from and draw them into his maze like realms, ready to strike them down once their usefulness has expired. I clicked, ready, willing to once again take the plunge....and there was nothing. Nothing at all. The information was gone, deleted and finished. It was too much. The laugh I let out scared me, chilling me to the very core. What was I becoming?

I noticed movement outside my window, and caught the sight of someone in a hoodie. Had they been watching? Did they know? Was it one of his followers who had been sent to see if I would once again take his bait and draw myself into his world? I didn't know...I didn't really care as the fear bloomed in my chest. At this point, there was only one thing I could do, one thing that would make sense to my fear hazed brain.

Friday, 20 April 2012

We begin this in the place of my birth. The place where I had lived my entire life up until the point I realized that it was no longer safe. Nor was any other for that matter.

I had lived in Las Vegas since the day my mother gave her life to bring me into this world. My father worked extra hard to support us on a card dealer's salary. Very often I was left by myself, something not safe for a child of my age, but hell if we had enough money for a baby sitter. I learned I was the only one who could take care of myself, and not to rely on others from such a young age, never opening my heart to anyone for the longest time. We got along just fine dad and me. I learned to stay out of his way when he had been drinking, and he learned that my existence was an obstacle on his path to a happier life. He went away 25 to life for attempted murder.

On my own finally. Not really having to rely on anybody. The state wasn't a great care taker, with too many kids and not enough money to feed all the hungry mouths. I can't say I wasn't partially hoping for this, the opportunity to make my own way, find my own food and shelter seeing as foster families don't want teenage boys hanging around. Time slipped away on the strip as the rain poured over my head and I watched the happy tourists, finding their joy in sin, scandalous behaviours, and prospect of big money right around the corner. I could see the true faces under those masks of the innocents, full of greed and devilish charms. How cruel and kind god could be all within the same block.

I grew, becoming old enough to get a job, and I put myself through school. I refused to be like my father, unable to support whom so ever came into my life, if that could even happen for a person who closed off their heart to everyone. I slowly made friends in school...and that is where this all started.

A simple link.

Innocent enough until clicked, and then I was pulled into his world. The nightmares started soon after but I brushed it off. No way this would happen to me, I'd gone through enough in my life that god couldn't possibly wish this upon me. At the time, perhaps I was right about God having nothing to do with this, and a tough life is my fate. In any case I went about my daily life, going to my classes and meeting my life, trying to be as normal as possible during the day while at night my dreams were haunted by the paranormal. Fiction created by others to simply become nightmare fuel for the poor suckers like me. I tired to keep a normal life...but honestly, how long could that last?

Thursday, 19 April 2012

I am sorry to those that are still human. My fight seems to have failed and I am running through the shadows that used to be our grand cities. Forgive me if you can find it in your heart, but I hold very little hope that you are still like me. I am a fool for believing that he can't find me...I know very well that he lets me run to see my failures in the true light, untouched by my previously skewed visions of grandeur. When will I join his legions? When will I lose myself to his wills? That I don't know...but I at least have enough time to warn you.

He is coming. If you found this blog I think that you already know who he is, and right now...I am afraid to say his name should he use his path of the damned to find me, though now I am not really a threat. Now that I think about it...I never really was. That's not my point. In any case, he is coming. Not just for the runners or for the people who know of his existence, but for the normal folk, who live their life blissfully unawares. Soon no one will be safe from his clutches. None will escape his spider like hold and octopus like tentacles. We will all see his featureless face and hear the demon like scream in our dreams, and that is just the beginning.

This territory has never been crossed before, and who even knows if there is even a way out. Please be careful, don't trust anyone. They could be one of his messengers of death and destruction. Tread on the safest path my friends...and may your life end in the least painful way possible.