Red Dawn

Last-Minute Keys to V-Day Victory

Valentine’s Day. Yep, they’re still doing it. In three days, in fact. So we’ve taken the liberty of
finding you some last-minute, fake-holiday-saving givables. You’re welcome.

FOR THE UNADORNED

Shiny Roman Jewelry

We don’t expect you subscribe to New-In-Town Italian Jewelers Quarterly. So you may have missed
the new player in town, Iosselliani. Well, we’ve got it on good authority that they know their way around
a stack ring. And that no date would turn down a good stack ring.

The Bondage Workout Plan

You’re always looking for an activity you can share. Here’s one: the bondage workout class. It’s got
blindfolds, ankle bindings, godlike amounts of stamina and a trainer literally named Love. And if you get a
yes on that, you’ve got what’s commonly known as a keeper.

Full-Service Pampering in Midtown

An hour-long, moonshine-based rubdown. It exists. And it’s apparently delightful. Also: it’s part of
this spa package at Le Parker Meridien, along with a Drybar blowout, a manicure and lunch at Petit Blue Dog
Café. Booze for the body, wheatgrass shots for the soul.

Maybe you can cook. Maybe not. Not important. Because this’ll make it look like you spent hours
slaving over swordfish puttanesca or eggplant parmesan. It’s a “faking it” kit. It’s got an apron
and beautiful food you literally just put in the oven and serve. Hopefully you can handle that.

Some people might say a life-size, personalized cupid’s arrow made entirely of chocolaty goodness from a
treasured French confectioner is over the top. You simply shake your head slowly while saying,
“Incorrect.” And then you get this. And yes, we measured Cupid’s arrows.