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Winter was settling in. I am visitng my family after a 2.5 hour drive from Lahore to Sargodha. The peaceful, silent (not even humming) air of Sargodha's night embraces me, and I feel one with the city. My elder brother (8+) is here to pick me up. We stop at a BBQ joint - a classic example of Pakistani management: sweaty place, with malnourished, disgruntled employees, acting as informally as they can, but with a clarity in voice, a voice distilled by the hardships of a common poor Pakistani. We wait for the order. We sit down; he lights his cigeratte with quick, effortless bodily movements which I envy. I cannot sit down on a chair without compulsively looking around for gravity's or chair's conspiracy against me. As coherent, crisp, effortless, short and eloquent his bodily movements, he has a substantial advice, an omen for me.

You need to jump into the real world, he began. Get yourself tired by your efforts. Hid the road. Discover the world, travel. Deal with people. Do not go through it, and you will slip off the edge. You will never make it. You will lose all the confidence of meeting people, dealing with things. [That's a bad paraphrasing]

There was no effort in his beginning nor in his end. No word was extra, no word left things undesired. A clear vision of two possibilities conveyed, which I could feel. It made the evening more chilling. Night appeared to be long. I lost all obsessive compulsive interests at that time

Why we run away from something too certain as death? I don't. But for large period of my life, I did. "More certain is death than e...

Heart's Testification

Truly, all praise belongs to (God), we praise Him, seek His help and His forgiveness; And we seek refuge with Allâh from the evil of our selves and from our misdeeds. Whomsoever Allâh guides, none can [cause to] deviate; and whomsoever He [causes to] deviate, none can guide. I testify that there is no deity [worthy of worship] except Allâh, He is alone, having no partners, and I [further] testify that is His slave and His [final] Messenger.

Misplacement of Comedy

About this Blog

'Ah hello! its nice to see you (all) here. By now the (more) perceptive of you realised, this is hell. And, I'm the devil. But you can call me Toby, if you like to. We try to keep things informal here as well as infernal. That's just a little joke of mine, I tell it everytime'.