Remind Me Again, Why Am I in Business?

"I was spending less time at the business."Credit Finishing Technologies Inc.

It sneaked up on me about six years ago. After years of building one business and then another, I felt the need — and felt that I had earned the right — to take some “me” time and some more time with my wife and children. I decided it was time to start having more fun and to reassess my talents and my interests.

So, I learned to fly — and even bought an airplane. I started riding bicycles, took a 10-day scouting trip in the mountains with my son, attended music camps and took the family on great trips. I hired the best teachers I could find to teach me how to do the things I’d always wanted to do. Sounds fun, let’s go riding.

Obviously, this meant I was spending less time at the business. The pull of the business was always there, but there was also a push — a push to not be there. We all know we’re supposed to love work — are we having fun yet? — but for me, it had become a grind. Being there felt a bit stifling, uncreative. It was work, after all. Work is what you do to make money. So I spent even more time pursuing those other interests.

There was always a rush when I started a new hobby. That felt good. But then, after a while, it didn’t. It didn’t feel bad, but it lost some of the glow of excitement and anticipation. And over time, I got a bit out of shape mentally. I wasn’t always performing like an A-player in the business. The rhythm, the tempo, the beat that you have as a business owner is really important. My energy for it, though, had waned as my energy for other pursuits increased.

It was not a good feeling. Worse still, when I lost the tempo and energy, the means for regaining them seemed like a very big hill to climb. It think it was because I started assuming that getting back in the game meant I had to play it the same way I always had. And of course, playing it the old way was what had caused my dissatisfaction in the first place.

Basically, I didn’t have the will, the desire, to tackle the same old routines, problems and frustrations in the same old ways. In fact, I was no longer sure I could force myself to do it. As a younger man, I would have. Back then, I could tell myself, “Make this sacrifice, make the money and use the money to enjoy life.” Well, I had done that, and that had gotten old.

Perhaps I was overdoing the pursuit of happiness now, but the thought of really getting back into the flow of work made me tired. A number of thoughts came to mind: Perhaps I should just sell the company and move on. Or maybe I could hire a professional manager to replace me. And finally: “Hmmm, I can’t be the first person who has ever felt this way. Somebody else must have figured this out.”

When I heard about the management method created by W. Edwards Deming, a light bulb went on. “You mean there is a method for doing that and being successful, too? You mean I can actually enjoy going to work?”

Deming wasn’t just a guy with great theories, though. He knew how to make things happen and get things done. Why hadn’t I known about him and his methods? (Probably because I never went to business school. I was a sales guy, a risk-taker, and a hard worker who trusted my gut. And my gut — and hard work — paid off.)

I learned about Deming at an organization called Aileron in late 2013. And as I learned more, I started to feel better. I felt better about my energy for the business, and I felt better about being in business.

In an earlier post, I mentioned that after a two-and-a-half-day Deming seminar at Aileron, I introduced myself to Kelly Allan, one of the facilitators, and said I would like to talk further. As it turned out, he was the first person outside my family and close circle of friends whom I confided in about my feelings of frustration and my disappointment with work.

Talking to Kelly, I realized that, no, I was not the first person to feel this way. I saw that while we are all individuals, there are certain patterns and rhythms to life — patterns and rhythms that we have to respect if we are going to take care of ourselves psychologically.

I’ll share the struggles I have had with those in a few coming posts. Oh yes, it’s about the money, but it’s not only about the money.

Fred Warmbier owns Finishing Technology Inc., which is based outside Cincinnati. He writes these posts with Kelly Allan, who runs a consulting firm that emphasizes the teachings of W. Edwards Deming.

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You're the Boss offers an insider's perspective on small-business ownership. It gives business owners a place where they can compare notes, ask questions, get advice, and learn from one another's mistakes. The blog also offers analysis of policy issues, and suggests investing tips.