Welcome, Woke Citizens!

When the Ministry of Progressive Affairs invited me to become Director of Youth Outreach, I was honored, but surprised: what do I, a straight, white, cisgender man have to teach the kids of Woke City? I respectfully turned the offer down.

But then my beautiful wife opened my eyes: “Ally Ira,” she said as she fed a homeless man from her own breasts, “it is our duty to be a voice for those who don’t have a voice—or an internet connection. You’re too humble; you never bring up any of the awards you’ve gotten throughout your career, or the thousands of lives you’ve changed with your ally work.” It’s true, I never mention them. But that’s because as an ally, I never want to call attention to myself or my impressive philanthropy efforts—only to those it benefits.

Yet she was right. As a privileged citizen, it is my duty to be the face of those whose faces are too dirty for prime time. I am in, Woke City. Let’s change the world—one retweet at a time!

Episodes

Cast and Creative Team

Writer, producer, consistently saving the world from the male gaze by spirit guiding your girl through her bicurious phase. I bike because cars are for planet killers, but only when it's warm. www.lillycamp.com

Ranmi Lee (Audio Engineering, Editing)

Sound designer/editor/engineer by day, professional ninja and cat walker by night. Some call me 'half pint' because of my size. Overly sensitive to the cold but always craving chocolate ice cream...

Pance Pony (Arrangements, Score | Vocals: Kombu$ha)

Music producer, songwriter, cellist, and sometimes I act like I’m an actress, but I’m really not. I guess I’m an actress actress? I have anxiety sometimes. www.pancepony.com

Emily Verla (Hairy Legs Hannah & Others)

Actor, Welder, Lesbian, Only Child. Carries THREE sizes of reusable metal straws at ALL TIMES and will passive aggressively use them even if a plastic earth destroyer is "accidentally" placed in my drink. www.emilyverla.com

Bethany Sharp (Astounding Ashley & Others)

Producer, director, actor, man-hater. I loathe the new Wonder Woman movie because if she were a real Amazon she would have cut off her right boob like I did. Down with the patriarchy!

Sara Ornela (Guest Vocals: Lady Stache Laura)

Actor, musician, writer, secretly Loves my Little Pony. When I’m not baking in my kitchen and consensually pinching the cheeks of my friends, I’m punching the shit out of a boxing bag and yelling at white men who stare at me too long. A big fuck you very much to the city I love so dear. saraornelas.com

Ryan George (Guest Vocals: Pastor Peck)

Black actor and creator. Sci-fi, Video Game, and Comic book lover. Put a down payment on my beach front property in Wakanda.

Adam Sharp (Ally Ira & Others)

Michael Lloret (Pro Life Peter & Others)

Actor, Musician, Former Fraternity bro. Don't take life too seriously. The best stories were never planned situations. Oh, I'm secretly also a chef. michael-lloret.com

Daniel Berlingeri (Guest Vocals: Masc Mason)

Nandita Shenoy (Guest Vocals: Arab Amirah)

Writer. Actor. Bacon-lover. Reportedly "sweet, weird, and wonderful" while also destroying the patriarchy by writing plays about women of color in which they are not sad.

Chauncy Thomas (Shaven Legs Shawn & Others)

Black, gay actor hellbent on world domination, the uprising of feminism, the castration of the patriarchy, and a bloodless coup of class warfare one booty jiggle at a time. www.chauncythomas.com

Aleca Piper (Guest Vocals: Twerky Tina)

Tall. Funny. And ready to take over the world with art. Always down to have fun but knows when it’s time to get to business. That being said, LET’S WERK!

Amelia Fowler (Guest Vocals: Faithful Fanny)

Actor who sings and moves well, improviser and all around big, beautiful, bad ass chick. Presenting big, black women in all mediums as three dimensional with abandon always. ameliafowler.com

Thank you to our supporters!

It’s Woke Citizens like you that make this all possible:

Aarthi Arunachalam

Adam Pliskin

AJC Imagery

Alexa Kuenstler

Alice Qin

Amelia Moriarty

Anonymous

Antonio Merenda

Carlos Armesto

Cassie Flores

Carine Moreira

Christopher Moncayo-Torres

Cilia Antoniou

Deborah Verla

Emily Verla

Emily Widra

Erica Tennyson

Eva Hachikian

Forrest Leo

Jan Klump

Jeffery Orellana

Jenn Sherman

Jessica Breslow

Joanna Alpern

Laura Green

Manuela Tauscher

Marta & Carlos Chocholous

Mary Schaale

Melinda Besai

Michael Camp

Mike Verla

Nathalia Machado

Ngacwj

Nick Ivons

Oystein Brager

Patti Miller

Rebecca Kenigsberg

Roberta Pereira

Roberto Welch

Sarah Farrand

Soupy Dupe

Tiger Fluffy

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Contact Us

The Ministry of Progressive Affairs will do its best efforts to read and respond to all messages, but keep in mind we are saving the world, so it might take a while.

You can also reach out to Hairy Legs Hannah on Twitter, @NotALesbo. Her account is not run by the Ministry of Progressive Affairs and we take no responsibility for any content posted in it or any interactions you have with her, however hairy.