"It's All About The Pentiums"

"It's All About The New Remake"

Parody Written by:

Mytheos Holt

The Lyrics

Also requires knowledge of "the Ring."

An entourage of SAMARA's VICTIMS moves onto the stage as backup singers.

VICTIMSIt's all about the new remake, baby UhhUh huh, yeahUhhUh huh, yeahIt's all about the new remake, babyIt's all about the new remake, babyIt's all about the new remake, baby (It's all about the new remake)It's all about the new remake, baby (It's all about the new remake)Yeah!

SAMARA enters and begins rapping.

SAMARAYou've got seven days.Unlucky fellerswell dwellers, yellersI can beat you evil ghost dispellersWhile my movie's become a bestsellerAmong the Goths, emos and the bank tellers.I'm ripe for the kill, subjugating Aidan's willThere's a lot of blood that I'll spill.I got me a bad nensha produced tapeWhich opens the well and lets me escapeI've got serious closure problems for sureI don't wanna seem mean, but dude, everyone will suffer!I murder a victim at least once a weekI make "em yell and shriekPlus their TV starts to leak.I screw with Aidan, I get him screaming for aidI come to him at night because he gets so damn afraidIt's all about the new remake, what?Yes, I know I could be much better groomedBut if you see me, know that you're doomed.The fact that I am criticized is a shock, thoughI could kick the ass of precious Sadako.She's hasn't got a backstory, what a joke!Plus I think I'm much more scary when soaked.She can put all of her menace into one of her eyesShe's the biggest joke in our whole franchise.Her fanbase seems to not be growingShe isn't played by Daveigh and there's just one eye showing.Nakata, I bet some whorehouse is where you got herHow else could you dig up such an unghostly rotter?She hasn't got any sense of how to slaughterHow can anyone say she beats the Morgans' daughter?She doesn't even look like she's dead in the water!

ALLIt's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)

Now, you wanna hang out with me, huh?No, I'll never upgrade my tape to DVD.They call me a menacing creature"Cause I ain't exorcised by no preacher.I am the scariest girl yet, you betWhy, I even scared my parents' horsey pets!Malevolence lurks underneath my dark locksHell, I had the scares to kill Brian Cox.Some say that my movie's less weird than "The Grudge."They haven't got the brains to judge.My mean, killer video is copyrightedBut I'm not delighted that no copies have been sighted.In terms of vocal chords, I'm a rasperBut that didn't hurt, "cause my boyfriend is Casper.While we ghosts rarely talk "cause we're all plagued with shyness,The Phantom of the Opera calls me "Your highness."I've got a love for killing and I'm really meanI just hope I'd be watched on Plasma screen.It's not a nice life for the humans who know meI scared David Dorfman, I spooked Naomi.Those folks on "she-is-here" are all whacksMy tapes don't mean crap, they just mean more ghost attacks.I say I'm the best, I dare you to attack thisSadako just lacks pissShe's just ghostbuster practice!

ALLIt's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)It's all about the new remake (It's all about the new remake, baby)

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