Monday, August 29, 2011

An Opinion. Mine.

I love to dance. Because of where I grew up, the only dancing I did was around the kitchen and out in the fields to my own beat and style. I remember at one point kicking my leg up and next thing I knew I was howling in pain as my ankle bone came into harsh contact with the edge of the kitchen counter.

Taking part in formal dance instruction wasn't an option living out in the boonies so I twirled my way around the fields for years. When it came time to pick my career for college I knew what I wanted to major in. Dance. Period.

Life and circumstances being what they were, that didn't happen so I still continue to dance around my kitchen and yard to my own beat and style occasionally bouncing off of cabinets and such as I lose my balance and make a fool of myself. I said I love to dance. I never mentioned I was graceful.

The SM knows my love of dance so he looks for opportunities to take me on dates to different dance productions.

A few weekends ago, he took me on one such date. When he told me where we were going, I was excited. The talent would be superb. Dancers from the area who have moved onto bigger and much in the lime light careers were coming back to put on a performance. Many of these dancers dance for big name shows and have won page long lists of awards.

One of the great things about the location of this production was that it was in an outdoor theater and we could come an hour before the main show, sit and eat our dinner picnic style, and watch a pre-show of young local dancers.

We found our spot up front and cozied up with our food and each other. Enjoying conversation around mouthfuls of food our attention was brought to the stage as the pre-show began. What beautiful costumes! I couldn't wait to see what such young talent would display for us. Food forgotten, I sat ready, as the dancers found their spots and struck their pose before the music began.

The music began and my stomach immediately wanted to reject what I'd just put in it. I sat and watched beautiful young girls move their bodies in such a fashion that I wondered when they were going to bring out poles for the girls to dance around. The music, inappropriate talked about things these girls ought not to be thinking of at their age, an age where boys still have cooties for heaven's sake! As the girls danced, the audience whistled and shouted out to the girls. Shouting out encouragement.

When the dance was over, I was dumbfounded. There is no way on this earth that I would allow my daughter to participate in such a production.

The next group came on and I looked at The SM and wondered what on earth the parents and the production company were thinking! No older than five years of age. Most younger I would guess, came trouncing onto the stage in a get up that had me stunned. Little girls dressed up to appear like ladies of the night, bloomers that gave the appearance of garters on their thighs, and a dance fit to go with the costume. Little girls!! Innocent little girls pumping their hips and bodies in ways that should have made the audience blush and be uncomfortable. Instead their was loud whistling, calling out, and clapping.

Here is where I give my opinion. After the pre-show was over and the real show began, which was tasteful by the way, The SM made the comment, how sad it was that the young girls in the pre-show got louder applause than the main show itself. I sat looking around at the parents of these young girls and wondered how in the world, they thought this was so darling and cute..... and we wonder why our society is crumbling morally.

16 comments:

Years ago, at the 4th of July parade, we saw the Orem High Cheerleaders doing a routine in the street that seemed pretty much begging for the men in the crowd to run out and shove money down the front of the girls' way too revealing uniforms. I was stunned. Honestly stunned. And wondered how the double hockey sticks the school administration AND the parents had missed seeing what whoever they'd hired as the cheer coach was doing.

Here is what I think: for all the religious discussion that goes on in this valley - for all the moral teaching we all say we believe in - I know tons of grownups - including some in my own extended family - who watch things on TV with no problem at all - things that hit me in the face like a spittle.

I'm no broom-backed prude; I believe in telling complex stories. But what I don't believe in is people talking our of one side of their mouths about young woman values and marriage in the temple and clean lives and innocence - while with their other self, they are buying their daughters strapless prom dresses, getting all excited about novels that feature young girls who are lying and flirting with dark sex, and dressing even their tiny girls like they're prepping them for a life of selling their bodies.

And I don't think I'm putting this too strongly. How "cute" is a bikini on a six year old? And how can you send your child to a "dance" teacher who teaches that same six year old pelvic thrusts and sexualized moves - including that infernal, obnoxious run-your-hand-over-your-hair move.

Do these women NOT GET IT? That conference talk about not putting up a picture of a ship in your living room, but putting up a picture of the temple instead - or something else that's inspiring, beautiful and predictive of your children's future? That talk? Was that GA just blowing smoke? Or did HE MEAN WHAT HE SAID?

Sexualized little girls are not cute. And they are not harmless (to anybody - can you say "child pornography"? And who do you think LOOKS at that stuff? Men who should be sweet fathers. Men who stand in the audience at parades and dance concerts. Young men who are fighting the setting up of their mature endocrine system. And to a MAN - that thrust of the hips, and that saucy pout, that sticking out of the mammary glands? That all speaks to them in NEON, and very stressful terms.

I don't get it. I really don't. Maybe the first thing we should be teaching parents is REAL LIFE and how to see clearly, and how to grow up and GET IT.

Okay (pant, pant) - what was your title? You wanna change it now to WE have an opinion?? Because I think I have one too.

I was ever so glad when my husband retired from teaching at the high school...too many female body parts on view. My other pet peeve is pants/shorts with words, like CUTIE or SWEET written across the butt.Modesty is becoming a lost art, isn't it?

I'm with you. When my little girls began begging for dance lessons I had to search all over town for a non-obscene option. We ended up finding a set of sweet, openly Christian dance instructors that believe that little girls are little girls, and even then I have only allowed my girls to take classical ballet. The other options are just too . . . ugly.

Kristen, That is exactly what I was thinking. All of it! What are we missing here folks??? I don't get it. Is it trying to live their lives through their kids? I really don't know. And the whole double standard just kills me.

Donna, Oh I can only imagine! Standing at the front of the room with girls who do not know what to do with their legs no less. I know of a Sunday School teacher who hated it because the young ladies in his class didn't know how to sit and were constantly flashing. And the whole words on the butt..... again...... what exactly are we saying??

Chastina, I saw that! :D I thought it was funny that article was posted the same day I decided to rant.

Anaise, Poor Henny Penny hasn't been able to dance for the same reason. This fall she is starting with a company with BYU. My neighbor's daughters have danced with them and I've been very impressed with the costumes and dance.

Amen to your opinion. Amen to K's opinion. Amen to Donna's comment. Amen to Chastina's link. Amen to Anaise's conundrum. Let those little girls be little girls! Dress them in modest, comfortable clothes and teach them to respect their bodies. I don't want my daughters to look like they are for sale and I don't want to have to look at others' daughters who are dressed in such a degrading way.

I will stop now, since this is your blog - not mine. But again - AMEN, sister!

You hit reason #1 on the head why Emma hasn't been signed up for dance. I love to dance. I used to dance as a girl- in parades, in competition, on stage, but never like they way they do it today. So yes, I agree with you- all of you, and maybe we will just try gymnastics with Emma instead.

Oh my. You have made me appreciate Middling's dance school through this post of yours. Nothing untoward in it, though I was a little put off by the stage makeup, which was only a light lipstick and a bit of mascara. But it was still makeup, ya know?

Now, what has utterly horrified me are the Facebook photos that girls of all ages are posting. I've only looked at fb recently, and oh, my heart is breaking.

Sorry, I'm a bit behind here and catching up this morning. First half-normal day today in a few weeks due to so much abnormal stuff going on in our lives right now. I mailed you a letter yesterday. This post, and your feelings, are right on. What is wrong with our children's leaders to believe this is "ok"? Unreal to me. Just unreal.

Wabi, It is sad the way girls and women are portraying themselves these days. I think it falls on the parents and I wonder what in the world they are thinking most of the time but then, maybe they are just doing what their mother's taught them..... the cycle needs to end that is for sure.

Jody, I've been wondering where you are!! I've been worried about you and thinking those girls have you running in circles. Glad to see you on here again.

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Hi! I'm The Mum, married to The Sexy Scout Master (SM). We've been married many moons and in that time have had seven offspring (The Natives). One of The Natives Levi, has AHC, is mentally handicapped, and on the autism spectrum. I've been battling West Nile Virus for eight years now and counting. Sometimes I win......and sometimes it wins......when it does.........I nurse my wounds in chocolate and go shopping on the internet for more shoes!