'When Rebecca died, the idea that one day I might begin to feel better would have struck me as laughable ... I know how persuasive this kind of permanence thinking can be.

I know too that anyone locked in its grip will laugh if I promise them that their pain will one day ease. It will. Of course it will. But I know better than to expect anyone to believe me.'

In 2015, former England football star Rio Ferdinand suddenly and tragically lost his wife and soulmate Rebecca, aged 34, to cancer. It was a profound shock and Rio found himself struggling to cope not just with the pain of his grief, but also with his new role as both mum and dad to their three young children.

Rio's BBC1 documentary, Being Mum and Dad, touched everyone who watched it and won huge praise for the honesty and bravery he showed in talking about his emotions and experiences. His book now shares the story of meeting, marrying and losing Rebecca, his own and the family's grief - as well as the advice and support that get him through each day as they strive to piece themselves back together. Thinking Out Loud is written in the hope that he can inspire others struggling with loss and grief to find the help they need through this most difficult of times.

More by Rio Ferdinand

Rio Ferdinand Rio Ferdinand is widely acknowledged as one of the most talented and skilful defenders in the world. His transfer from West Ham to Leeds was a British record at the time, a feat he achieved again with his subsequent move to Manchester United. Ferdinand's success on the pitch has been meteoric; including high drama in the Champions League, three World Cups and a dramatic Premiership victory.

Here, for the very first time, Ferdinand reveals all about his infamous missed drugs test, the controversies surrounding both his transfers, his supposed reluctance to re-sign for United in 2005, the alleged tapping-up meeting with Chelsea's Peter Kenyon and various tabloid headlines involving partying and women.

'A searingly honest book. So much of Rio's emotional turmoil and deep loss resonated with me. At the same time I loved his message of hope' GLORIA HUNNIFORD

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'When Rebecca died, the idea that one day I might begin to feel better would have struck me as laughable ... I know how persuasive this kind of permanence thinking can be.

I know too that anyone locked in its grip will laugh if I promise them that their pain will one day ease. It will. Of course it will. But I know better than to expect anyone to believe me.'

In 2015, former England football star Rio Ferdinand suddenly and tragically lost his wife and soulmate Rebecca, aged 34, to cancer. It was a profound shock and Rio found himself struggling to cope not just with the pain of his grief, but also with his new role as both mum and dad to their three young children.

Rio's BBC1 documentary, Being Mum and Dad, touched everyone who watched it and won huge praise for the honesty and bravery he showed in talking about his emotions and experiences. His book now shares the story of meeting, marrying and losing Rebecca, his own and the family's grief - as well as the advice and support that get him through each day as they strive to piece themselves back together. Thinking Out Loud is written in the hope that he can inspire others struggling with loss and grief to find the help they need through this most difficult of times.