Well folks, Duke Nukem Forever has been in the making for the past 12 years (I believe that's correct) and it has finally hit shelves. I completed the game a few days ago and decided to wait a few days later to do a review. From all the other reviews that I've read about it, I'd say about 80% to 90% of them are seriously tearing this game a new asshole. Well, I believe the mass reviewers are being just a bit TOO harsh to this game and I'll point out what I liked and disliked about this game.

First off, the requirements for this game aren't bad at all (although it does kind of scream out "CONSOLE PORT!") The recommended requirements are:

These requirements aren't bad at all and most modern systems will handle the game at great settings with little to no problems at all. The downside is that the graphics do look outdated. When you compare some of the games out today with DNF, you'll see that DNF has some outdated-looking textures. Not only do the textures look pretty bad but they load awfully slow.

Story:

Now the story of this game isn't bad at all. It's basically continuing where Duke 3D left off. Duke is now living a life of fame after kicking the aliens' asses. It seems all is right with the world until one day, the aliens come back and continue their quest to enslave the women while slaughtering the guys. This infuriates Duke and he then again, embarks on an ass-kicking quest to save the world again. EVERYTHING that you loved about Duke in Duke 3D is all here: his one-liners, his misogynistic attitude, and his brutal, but effective, methods of opening a can of ass-whooping on these aliens. And finally, this game is chockful of unrated adult-level content. It's quite obvious that Duke is a titty-loving man. *Insert Butt-Head style laugh.* I'm a titty-loving guy too...

Gameplay:

Gearbox did a pretty decent job with the gameplay in this game. They did well because they stuck with the original Duke 3D formula of gunplay and I really did enjoy using the whole circle-strafing method to kill these aliens. Gearbox kept it very simple and I applaud them for keeping the original formula all the while also keeping it fun at times when you WERE in firefights. Where they didn't do well is that there was too much traveling and not as much gunplay. One particular area is in the casino:

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You're shrunken down and drive around the entire casino for like 3 chapters in an RC car.

All that ran in my mind during this whole driving sequence bullshit is: "When am I finally going to turn normal?!" There is too much wandering around and not enough busting caps in pig cops' asses. The puzzles incorporated in this game weren't difficult at all to solve but they did require SOME level of thinking. They weren't too bad but they seemed a bit unnecessary at times.

One major area that critics complained about is the whole thing about being able to only carry 2 weapons. What the fuck people?! In all the Call of Duty games, you carried 2 weapons: your primary and a secondary that usually consisted of a sidearm and yet you don't complain about that bullshit. I believe that those people that are using this claim are just being douchebag ass trolls. It really wasn't that hard to conserve ammo and in reality, you didn't have to do much conserving because there were spare weapons just laying around. I do have some complaints about certain weapons in the game though. The freeze ray in this game is HORRIBLE! The range is absolutely short and the time it takes to actually freeze someone is atrocious. The shrink ray was just absolutely hard for me to aim. Another thing I hated about the inventory of this game is the Duke Vision. For some, the Duke Vision might be a little too bright and can tire out your eyes very quickly (it did for me.)

Misc:

If I were to talk about any miscellaneous aspects about this game, it would be about the little extras that they added into around in certain maps. Certain activities will raise up your Ego; which is like a shield to you and can range from pissing into a toilet to slapping large titties on a wall (don't ask....just don't.) These activities just seem very out of place and unnecessary for this game.

Conclusion:

"Pure fun" is how I would describe this game because that's really what it was made for; just pure unrated fun. Crude and sexual humor coupled with frenzy action pieces (when there is action going on) make this game a good ride but not great. Outdated looking graphics, long and frequent travels, and the unnecessary activities kind of ruin the game for me. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the action of this game and it was pure fun but the cons hurt this game too much. For my rating, I give this game a 7/10.

Pros:

- Original Duke Nukem gameplay
- Humor is good most of the time
- Easy to get used to the game

Cons:

- A couple of weapons suck big brass balls
- Graphics looks very outdated
- Too much traveling and not much action
- Certain activities just made no sense and were unnecessary.

I LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT!!!! I haven't finished the game yet, and there are a few things that I wasn't happy with, but over all I am quite pleased with the game. Rent it though and don't buy it probably.

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