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“Look, even if I drink this glass of water, Sam will keep talking!”Photo illustration: Everett Bogue; Photos: Getty Images

According to Newsday itself, Cablevision has officially put in its bid for $650 million to buy the struggling Long Island tabloid. As we’ve noted, that puts the Dolan family bid $70 million ahead of competitors Mort Zuckerman and Rupert Murdoch. But sources close to Tribune Company owner Sam Zell, who is doing the selling, say that he “still would like to do a deal with Murdoch, because they have a budding relationship.” Cue the sound of a needle screeching off a record. “Rupert is going to have to put more money in,” hastens the source, “which I think he will do.” Um, so this was maybe a done deal before anybody even anticipated a handshake? We’re beginning to understand why Murdoch’s news outlets are defined by a kind of mass paranoia about world events. We’d suspect everything was a conspiracy theory, too, if we knew just how easy it was for one person to secretly decide the outcome of massive transactions before they are even on thetable.