I never knew following dreams could be this lonely,
But up on the hill, looking back, thank God I'm not the old me.
If the tears will fall, let them be;
I believe this is God's plan, follow your dreams.

GOD
Wondrous of many blessings.
Smiling never a frown.
My prayers, Lord, are suddenly being ignored.
I've taken a tumble of fallen down
Lord, my life was plain and simple
How did it come to this?
Lord, now I carry a burden so deep
A torn up life not easy to fix
Hard to get my prayers before I sleep
Bleeding only internally!
Feeling very minutely!
God, have you deserted me or is it me who deserted you?
God, my Lord, my savior, how could you abandon me?
Must I drown in my own sorrow?
Must I wake up like this today and tomorrow.
Why have you left me, or is it me who left you?
God, I need you like never before.
When I wake up,
When I head out the door.
Tormented in a mood ring of stock
Heavily my tears hit the floor.
God, do you not feel me, or is it me who no longer feel you?
God, what is your plan for me?
What things did I not see?
I asked for you to forgive me in my ways of sin.
Why do you let him provoke me?
Lord, I forbid for him to win.
Relieve me from his gutless pain.
God, do you not believe me, or is it me who no longer believe in you?
God, do you not hear my call
My pitiful excuses make me weak and small
In your eyes, I no longer feel tall
I remain cursed in every single fall
Lord, only you can break this wall
Do you not see me on my knees
Must I beg and crawl?
I am at your mercy, crying out with grief
Open the path to the lighted hall
O' Lord, the day you judge me before your throne
Please tell me it was a lesson for me to stand up on my own
God for now I will end this talk
With the dignity to never look back
I ask if you were there on my endless journey of a relentless walk?
By:PD

One day there was an accident, and to heavens gate I was called.
As an angel sat down beside me, upon the bed I had been put upon.
Such a shining warmth ensued as it held me in its thrall.
A thought from God proclaimed, “What with your life have you done?”
Then all of life fled past me, but not as I did expect to see it done.
For all I saw and felt were things I hadn’t known I had done, and yet…
So much pain inflicted to each, with such little words and thoughts.
I never would have known such power, by one person, could be wrought.
I bowed my head in shame at the pain I knew I could not undo, yet…
Suddenly, I found myself forgiven. Yes, TRULY it was true!
Hallelujah became my amazed and impassioned cry before him, that night!
His warmth had never wavered, nor even his illustrious, wonderful light.
How could he forgive me, someone as wretched and lowly as I?
And yet, he did… and so he changed my life from then on out.
But low and behold he wasn’t yet done with me, or so my story goes…
He sent me back to my home again… it in comparison brought me low.
But he said my work lay uncompleted, so now I must go back…
He said to stay clean and I would blossom… What do you think of that?
A veil he placed upon my eyes to remove me from the knowledge of all I’d known.
Then he sent me from his side, where I could not see him but knew he was.
Now, here I stand before you, a totally changed and humbled one.
Still, I have found I have sinned again… I know he must have known.
Perhaps some day, as I patiently wait… I’ll be allowed once more within his gate.
Only time will tell, as again I’ll feel every ones pain…
All I can say is: God Forgive Me… as I continue to wait…
(This Near Death experience really happened and changed my life.)
Written 5-25-12 By Carol Eastman

Bleed for me
Why?
Why what she says?
Why do you cut, why do you bleed yourself?
Why do birds fly, how the heck should I know?
Ah but you are so beautiful, soft and sweet
You see only as you wish, no one looks closer
At the inside of me
No one sees the mirror I see
Tiss not true, I see through your eyes
Come then take a good look, stare into my emptiness
You see nothing ok?
I remain quiet, somewhat stunned at the rebuke
We both stare out the window, a broken neon sign
Singing with the wind
She whispers
If I cut myself, to pieces
I will slowly disappear and float away
Inside will be outside
The emptiness in my eyes will be everywhere
The Ferris-Wheel ride will end
I slowly gathered up some rather random thoughts
My life was sunny
Then one day it rained
Then sunny
Rain and sun, rain and sun
Then the rain came again
And again…
Dark clouds hovered
The days all became nights
Until there was daylight no more
A ghost taunted… I no longer mattered
Until I became the ghost
So you see, I have nothing left to cut
She shyly looked over at me, confused it seemed
You, you… you have money
You look handsome
I dare say you seem well off
You have it all, and want for nothing
The neon sign, the crickets, the bedside clock
A symphony of sound in a room of silence, tick tock. Tick tock.
Slowly, I discovered words, softly I dared repeat them
You said I see nothing
In this, is true, I did look into your eyes, I saw
Inside of you nothing as you say
Emptiness
I saw a poverty of wanton desire, lost to this world
In this you are also wrong
For as I stared you refused to avert my curiosity
Our eyes locked
The emptiness inside of you
You see
Is me
Time continued its journey
Tick Tock went the clock
Silence crept towards a comfort
Imperceptible, a few of their fingers interlaced
Touching
The neon sign stop flickering
And cried

I am the hypocritical Christian.
I say I follow Christ,
But I'm still consumed by my demons.
I go to church on Sunday,
But I refuse to invite someone back.
I want to serve on mission,
But I'm too afraid to act.
They think I read The Bible,
But I just fall asleep in it.
They think I'm positivity and smiles,
But underneath I'm death and addictions.
They think I'm clean and pure,
But I'm broken and mistaken.
I say I'm not worthy of His love,
But Jesus will never let me be forsaken.
I pray long prayers,
But inside they're empty repetition.
It might look as if my faith is strong,
But my core is too easily shaken.
I say the things I'm supposed to say,
But don't follow His actions or obey.
I speak the truth the church wants to hear,
But deep inside on matters I don't know what to believe.
I walk in shame as if I'm not good enough
To be loved by God and saved through Christ,
But there is nothing I could ever do to earn His peace;
It's a free gift.
I accept;
Now forgiven, changed, and released.
Thank You God,
Thank You Jesus,
Thank You Holy Spirit!
In Jesus' Holy Name,
We pray,
Amen!

She is the muse to her own sorrow;
She is the digger of her grave.
She is the painter of her ocean view
and every fatal wave.
She is the shadow of her Father;
She is the darkness in your sight.
She is the night without the stars
surrounding pale moonlight.
She is the music with no words;
She is sweet love without the reason.
She is your dreamer with submission
cold by warmth with every season.
She is your pet with cold intentions;
She is your baby scared and shaken.
She is the bold and pure- the lost and found,
She is a soul awakened.

Sometimes the memories won’t fade
All the places we have seen
All the prices we have paid
The memories of the happy as well as the sad
The people we’ve lost
The friends that we had
Some memories just seem like a ghost
I always lost everyone that I loved the most
The wind would just carry them away
Along with my tears
And my ability to pray
I wonder how far is heaven from here?
How many more heartaches
How many more tears
I wonder how far it is away
Because I have so many things that I wish to say
To all the people that I loved and I lost
I’m not even tripping
My heart paid the cost
The reaper rode the river in a bikers disguise
I’ll never forget the fear in my mother’s eyes
As he drug her under and then let her go
Through my four year old veins hate started to grow
My eyes were blind my ears were deaf
After that I forgot
There was anything left
Karma is like poker for it is bound to luck
When I was just a boy
God through me under the truck
Of all the things in life we feel
We are all bound to God’s will
Passion is a doorway between love and hate
God is the dealer in the game of fate
Our place is not to question why
For if we do our faith will die
The deeper we hate the deeper we love
I was gifted wisdom by the Lord above
Every gift comes at a price
A world of experience behind my advice
Every smile holds a lifetime of pain
Nothing that happens should happen in vein
It is our choice that which we do
Know in your heart these words are true
The harder we fall the further we climb
No ones life is totally sublime
Illusion after illusion will be offered to you
But only the living word is true
The living word that beats in your heart
Will keep you safe as the world falls apart
Through the pain of a boy watching his mother die
It’s never to late to kiss the sky
A man of faith who could never give up
Please come break my bread and share in my cup
By the time our journey is through
I’ll share all I am with you
Hopefully somewhere in my words you’ll see
---Untwisted is truly the way to be---

Gay Aliens
We are gay aliens
We come in peace
We traveled inconspicuously
to your world through intergalactic
pods or wombs
Our host who nurtured us
had the wisdom to know
that we were not like
other humans
Our hosts protected us
in our infancy
and from the men
who thought
they fathered us
These same men were
the first of many
to hate and hurt us
They called us names
like faggot and sissy
butt-bangers
We the gay aliens
Who come in peace
Were confused
and hurt by their
rejection
but we still love them
We were falsely
accused of beguiling
drinking the blood
and mutilating animals and children
to propagate our race
But that is not our mission
We come in peace
Some of us did
not complete our
mission because
we prematurely
killed ourselves
Some of us did
not complete our
mission because
we internalize
the hate of the
world for us
We were drunken
from firewater
ingested too many small white pellets
screwed with no avail
Because
We forgot
Who we were
And why we are here
We are the gay aliens
We are legions
Hidden among you
We are a gift to humanity
And we come in peace

Help me…
To stand ever resolute
Amongst perpetual ambiguity
That slowly expends me
When I am not vigilant
If I have firmly decided
To walk that razors edge
Where the vile assail me
Allow me the shield
Of His name
Where I will ever feel
No pain…

Sometimes I question my own faith and wonder if you are real,
can you really feel all the pain I feel.
I wonder, Can you hear me god?
Sometimes I cry myself to sleep,
do you know the reasons why I weep.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes I give up on myself,
is it because you forgot about me and chose to let me deal with myself.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes people hurt me , and sometimes I hurt others,
but it seems you let them be and it's my life you choose to bother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes i feel like I'm your mistake,
is it because you judge me for all the mistakes that I make.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes I hate others and sometimes others hate me,
but it seems you don't see others,
and it's my life with troubles you smother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes I hate you for taking my mother,
Sometimes I hate you even more for portraying my father.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?
Sometimes I think of my past,
and that's when I reliaze that nomatter what I'm feeling now,
it will never compare to the pain I was feeling back then.
It's times like this that I realize that's when you truelly chose to be my father,
to scold me, but hold me, to teach me but reach me.
To show me that my pain won't always last.
I believe this is true, at least that's the picture you drew,
yet I still wondwer, Can you hear me God?

It seems like falling apart or yielding would be so easy,
But I’ve been driving down this road so long,
That letting go or slowing down feels completely wrong.
So when it seems like I’m being admirably strong,
Know that I envy you who admits your humbling fears,
Even when you float by in a trail of self-made tears.
Show me proof that God somehow steers,
If I take my hands off the wheel of this lemon,
And relinquish muzzled pain and poisonous venom.

by Walks In Shadows
(Motif: spiritual)
Let me kiss your face,
Oh beautiful child,
Before the crack of the whip,
Before a sponge touches your lip,
Before the betrayal you will sip,
Before your blood must drip,
Lord, can you feel this?
It’s my kiss.

we stimulate our minds for our intellect to grow
becoming more technical
remaining spiritually slow
so we face trials and tribulation
crisis and complications
praising God, while serving Satan
expecting love when spewing hatred
our faith is dissipating
until its totally forsaken
for miracles we pray
yet and still we disobey
missed lessons
means blocked blessings
wrong paths are chosen
cursed to glimpse the promised land but never enter like Moses
it's hard to humble ourselves cause we've got pride
so we find a hard head leaves a soft backside
when stressed i ride
reclined, inside
sounds booming
trying hard to decipher the message in our music
Pac said keep your head up
Treach said guard your grill
Wu sang protect your neck
Cube said to kill at will
Eazy said easy does it
Run said hard times
Jigga ask can I live
but Big ready to die
50 cent said get rich ore die trying
K.R.S made stop the violence, and listen to my nine
these are questionable times
that leave young impressionable minds
hoping to find success pushing dope on the grind
thinking all the pain would end if they became rich
but the harder they hustle the more pain and anguish
if we could understand the hustle
we would over stand the struggle
instead we constantly land back in trouble
on frivolous pursuits
searching for forbidden fruits
living lies until they collide with the moment of truth
I been there and done that
played with fire and got burned as soon as my hand healed I'd run back
so young and misguided
mama said don’t do it I tried it
it's by God's grace I survived it
flash back to my youth I was so naive and timid
wondering if that path I walked on is the one the Lord intended
tired of getting beat by bullies so I learned to prevent it
but I found my self in front of the judge as a defendant
five times aquited of crimes that I committed
but the one time I was innocent is when I got convicted
justice may be blind, but she so vindictive
so I struggle with it
trying to make since out of the senseless

Lord grant me the power to achieve my goal in life
To have pain and turn it into something good
I have pain of being raped
It was such a shock that this was happening to me in such rage of these people
I never thought it would happen to me
I had heard about millions of people getting hurt like me
All these people who hurt little ones or anybody really should burn
Where as us all should be set free
Ones that have tried to confront these people, just turned out to be ignored
I stand where I had prove of this horrible happening
I confront these two people
I was investigated by this whole thing
I pray that I put these two people away
Even though I had confront them I guess I was chosen to have depression
The main thing is whatever happens
The lord is here to guide me, but not just me, all of you, the whole world!
These two people was put in prison for a long period of time
What they did was a crime
I know the Lord wants me to forgive them
It will take time but someday I will
I say to all of you,
If this ever happens to you, have faith and turn to God!
I now am in college and trying to get a job
Working on my poetry
That helps me through my depression and writing my poetry, that is one way to
speak to God
My goal in life is to believe in God, and keep my faith in him

When I am lost and all alone,
It’s then I turn to the Shepherd to guide me home.
When my heart gets bitter and full of doubt,
I surrender my problems to Jesus, He seems to always work them out.
I have been a victim of my own foolish pride,
Not trusting in Jesus to be my guide.
Many times I have stumbled and many times I have fell,
But that’s the good part of this story I tell.
For no matter how low in life we manage to sink,
It’s Jesus who will always bring you back from the brink.
We are like sheep we all go astray,
That is why we need our Shepherd to show us the way.
Jesus was the one who died for our sins so long ago,
Redemption is ours if we ask don’t you know?
Without Jesus in our lives we would have no hope,
And no chance for salvation or a reason to cope.
Imagine the pain He suffered that day,
Picture it in your mind how He died such a tragic way.
Body racked with pain and longing for the death that seemed so slow,
And being able to forgive those who did these things would have been hard for me,
don’t you know?
As I grow older in life there are things I tend to learn,
Like the most valuable possessions you cannot buy you have to earn.
Love, respect, and friendship are a treasured gift,
To have and to share will give you a blessed lift.

Nightmares, shame, and despair---
You don't go anywhere.
All alone in your mind
even with someone by your side.
You think, "Why can't everyone just leave me alone?"
You thought the hint would be cutting off the phone.
But everyone wants you to release your cares.
The next thing you do is frown and ask, "Where?"
Stinkin' thinkin' is what your mom calls it.
Bad thoughts falling down a bottomless pit.
You wake up hoping those feelings disappear;
but, as usual they end up going nowhere.
You can't seem to get rid of the pain
and in your heart an eternal rain.
No one really knows how you feel
and you have friends that always ask, "What the deal?"
But tomorrow always comes.
Bad days for you, but good for some.
Disparaging words flow in and out of your head.
You're alive but you're living like you're dead!
They're like cobwebs in your mind
that you can't seen to bind.
The hurt is always there
which has always been your fear.
You don't see the destruction your thoughts have created.
Yet relationships were destroyed with the people you've dated.
You allowed your pain to take away time.
Your anger towards others has become the real crime.
It all boils down to that one thing in your past.
A terrible time that from your mind you've yet to cast.
The pain from the physical and spiritual rape
that rolled around in your head like an old videotape.
The abuser was like a father to you
and when it first happened there was nothing you could do.
You felt trapped like you could go nowhere.
His power over you was to instill that fear.
The "fear" is what's wrong
and you must discover another heart song.
Up to this point life hasn't been the best.
Maybe letting go of this is the next test.
There has always been someone that has loved you.
Someone who is capable of taking you through.
He's a Friend that sticks closer than a brother,
Jesus--- a Savior like no other!
If you don't give it to Him so you can thrive
you will plummet to the depths and never survive.

Lord Jesus, I have a prayer
and I want You to hear it.
I really need Your love
and I need the Holy Spirit.
There is really one thing
that You can do for me.
Help me go way back.
Deep in my memory.
Help me remember the hurt
and help me remember the pain.
Help me remember how it felt
and help me remember from where it came.
Release me from these chains.
Help me crawl out of this hole.
Heal me Lord Jesus,
from what the bitterness stole.
I lost so many years
that I will always regret.
Take away the pain and hurt.
I want to forgive and forget.
I also ask You, oh Lord,
as You return what I lost.
Help me remember also
all the pain that I caused.
Is there anyone I hurt.
Someone I'm not even aware.
Help me remember them Lord.
I need to show them I care.
Let them know that I'm sorry
for everything that I've done.
Please God, I ask their forgiveness
in the name of Your Son.
If there's anyone I've hurt,
Jesus, please help me to understand
that I need to heal that hurt
that was done at my hand.
I ask to be forgiven Lord,
and I pray You help me forgive.
I want to turn the pain and hurt into love,
so I can finally live.
Bitterness creates an empty heart
and as you pray to the Father above,
say, "Jesus please take our empty hearts
and fill them up with Your love.

I long for love. Where could it be?
"I'm standing here" You said to me.
Blinded I walked, I could not hear it.
Each lover lost had weakened my spirit.
I know you're there, close by my side.
But I look for love where love is denied.
"But I am here," you said to me.
"I am your love. Please, look at me."
Lost hope at last, I fall to my knees.
Where is this love that you promised me?
"I'm here," you said, "Here by your side.
For you on the cross, I bled and I died."
"I know your pain and I know your loss,
I knew it all that day on the cross."
"So I could share forever with you,
I knew the shame. I bled for you."
"I knew you then and I know you now.
I'll never forsake you, I wouldn't know how."
"Come to me now, let my love guide.
Come to me now and be my bride."
"All the pain you feel, I'll wear for you.
Whatever befalls, I'll go through too."
Oh Lord, it is you! I will be your bride.
It's your love I need; please come inside.
How could I not see your love so true?
My life is complete. I'm in love with you.

A small grave, and for it's weeds was bare
with only a handmade wooden cross.
Easy to see that a child rest there.
Poor unloved young soul was my first thought.
Well I read this cross, for this child of grief.
"John my young son so frail and fair
my joy, my love, my life I leave
to the arms of your mother and Lord's care."
The back read; "To doctors all my money I gave
I cannot buy even a simple stone
with a borrowed spade, I have dug your grave,
I carve this marker, and am now alone."
That wooden cross, seemed to rise
high above great marble markers.
Thoughts rush my mind as I realized
the pain this poor man's heart had harbored.
Never again his son he will see
knowing his child would rests under cold ground.
As unkempt as this grave seemed to be,
with it's wooden cross and it’s weeds all around.
I pulled at those weeds with my bare hand
then my flowers I laid at the foot of that cross.
I prayed "Please God, help me understand"
as I felt the pain of another man's loss.

You believe your better than me?
Just because of the bruises you see?
So why don't you just hit me again, hit me
Your afraid because I now know who I am
Your deranged your the one who can't understand
Your nothing to me your a silly boy not a man
I will no longer sit in misery and hear your cries
I will no longer listen to your stupid and pitiful lies
As you fall to your knees and say your sorry,
For the blue and black bruses you had put on me,
And after another night of pain I dry my tears
For I can hear the voice of an angel near
I can mouth out the words there almost clear
For the angel says : "I am with you do not fear"
And then the voice fades and dissapears
I then think to myself what have I been doing here
How I have lived like this for many years
As I see him rest on the bed
With his arms wide open and spread
Vodka in one hang and the bible in the other
I tuck him in on both sides of the covers
I take one look at him and then at the door
A voice says: "Go you just can't take anymore"
But I say what if it gets better what if he can change
But what if it doesn't what if he just stays the same
If I step out what will be there for me
I then think about our past and all of our history
I can't take it he's gone insane
He's not the man I married on our wedding day
And as I walk out with my suitcase in one hand
I look at the trailer park and can't understandd
Reaching for the hope seeing the sun rise up
All I think now is what else the Lord will fill in my cup

With peace and love
I kneel a lamb
possessed by the wolf
within my own darkness howls
A son of the Father
Bowing the head to his mercy
Grace in shame a sinner weeps
who bit from the forbidden fruit
Knowing it's agony
in the garden of life's sufferings
Seeking his forgiveness
Oh Most Holy Lord
Always you dwell God most high
Almighty inside the heart
Light of Our Creator
there is no good inside
Dark nights of a soul's pain
tears of remembrance
As you sit with me alone
I grow stronger in faith

"MY SPIRITUAL BATTLE"
I miss who I once was and use to be
Bound by darkness, I long to be set free
Trapped by solitude, surrounded by pain
Nothing but heartache and sorrow to gain
A spiritual warfare, raging from within
Closer to despair than I have ever been
A battle that carnal man could never understand
As I struggle to hold to God's righteous hand
The days are long, the nights are longer
God please help me to grow stronger
I have grown tired and weary in this fight
As dimness overshadows your guiding light
I scream so loudly but no one hears
Is this my cross put before me to bear
Where are the prayers of the righteous man
Have they been traded for worldly pleasures at hand
My only hope is to see eternity begin
But, how do I live my life until then
This wicked world full of dangers and woes
As I beg for this feeling to be loosed and let go
How I pray for your peace that surpasses all understanding
Trade my tears and sadness for joy everlasting
To walk with the sunshine upon my face
In exchange for this cruel, dark and lonely place
God only you have the supernatural power to heal
I cry out to you, falling to my knees I kneel
How long must I suffer in darkness alone
As my will to fight is all but gone
Lord, you never promised that the cross would not become heavy
That the way would not become rocky and would not always be steady
However you promised to catch me if ever I should fall
To hear my cries, my prayers and my late midnight calls
Lord, I know I must suffer as you suffered too
But the carnal in me cries for the Savior in you
I know there is purpose in this storm that is raging
I know for me, your heart must be breaking
Reach out to me as you did Peter from the water
Guide me steady, eyes on you and never to falter
Fill me with hope and the promise of a better day
And the faith to move mountains when I pray
Lord if my time on earth should continue to linger
Lift me from this darkness, despair and danger
Heal me, leaving only battle scars to bear
A wounded soldier, at last, resting in your loving care
Written by: Donetta Harless
August 11, 2015

‘0 LITTLE WHITE TABLET’
O little white tablet, how I hate you,
I was only 21 years old, when introduced to you.
You looked so innocent, so white, so pure.
I was told you were the answer to everything,
(The cure)
No-one told me, when they introduced me to
the rest of your family, the yellow and the blue.
The blue being five times stronger than you.
No-one told me of the dangers you held within.
Of all the pain I would have to go through, all the suffering.
No-one told me. YOU would rob me, of eighteen
years of my life.
That I would be unable to function properly,
as a Mother and Wife.
No-one told me, I would get addicted to you.
Of all the pain and suffering, I would
have to go through.
To get you out of my system, alone took two years.
Two more years of heartbreak, many, many tears.
Then to find out, I had Agoraphobia.
Several more years, destroyed by fear.
Which a lot of people, say is caused by you.
Not being able to go out, far or near.
Hurting all the ones, I loved so dear.
O little white tablet, how I hate you.
But in the end I was the winner Not you.
This poem refers to prescribed drugs

In the past I remember how things were so simple
When I was little my cheeks had such cute dimples
Looking back I remember how sweet I was as a child
When I think again my heart told me I was so wild
Yet, in time my simple choices was revealed as true as anyone
The reason I was the way I am today, I did things, to get done
Finishing lots of my undone ideas was so incredibly hard
So I figure my heart and choices should never hold in no bard
I never thought I would learn heart aches and pain
With such under statement I did things for no gain
I was a child who held true to what he has learned
But as we got older those kinda perspective would get me burned
When I made up my mind that people was not kind
I led myself in a confusion that I was blind
In the past I do recall that seeing is believing
So I was the one who stood their with friends leaving
Alone, I felt I did not belong, I cherish each person who knew me
I got older too see how the world works it stung me like a bee
The feeling of tingling ran through my vain
My view of the world and people who knew me was stained
Now I know they are out for their selves with no kind feelings
Life I know is just a joke because of who I hung out with seeing
Today as I look at the world it is in such shambles and astray
And rather fallow everyone I just walk away

Hello Friends... I suffer from Severe Bi-Polar Disorder and this submission was inspired by
actual events that occured during one of my especially critical manic episodes. Be sure and
read Part 1 first so as to get the true gist of the poem and leave your comments here on the
Part 2 submission. Thank you for allowing me to share my pain for pain shared is pain
diminished.
Me, Myself, and I... (continued)
“Your, (Or “Our”), symptoms seem to intermit
And the fact that “You’re,” (“We’re”), a hypocrite
Tis no wonder we’re having such problems with diagnosis”
Then “I” had an idea so grand
To dispense with this at my own hand
A self-inflicted coup de grace would be my prognosis
So while the “Me” and the “Myself” squabbled
With courage newly cobbled
“I” spotted the dresser drawer and made my run
With fingers fiercely fumbling
Whilst they continued grumbling
“I” produced from the depths of the drawer a shiny gun
And now my life, though ill-fated
Was soon to be vindicated
This would affect us all equally the same
Would be no myself or me
No you, him, us, or we
But an inclusive all would be to blame
It took me a moment to figure
Out the safety on the trigger
Then “I,” (or “Us”), prepared to do the dirty deed
Then the barrel found my temple
And as it settled into the dimple
A still small voice did my “selves” choose to heed
Hence a moment of clarity
Harkened me to posterity
And I thought what a legacy to leave behind
“Can’t we all find a way
To save this miserable day
And avoid a broken body for someone to find”
And then deep within my soul
I felt and heard a simple drum roll
And the differing sides of me just subsided
And with my mind now as one
I worked to get this all undone
The whole business of this stuff I derided
And tis now true of fact
That I survived this ordeal intact
And lived to raise my face unto the sky
And here now as it ends
I find I’ve made good friends
With the “Me”, the “Myself,” and the “I”
Thank you for taking the time to share in my poetry. Please feel free to leave your thoughts
or comments here on this page.
J. Scott Burns...

How dare you take advantage of me like that ,
Leaving me stranded with no way to go forward or back.
Using the friendship that we had led me to believe,
That there was trust and honor between you and me .
How you layed me aside and left me for dead ,
You have caused these hateful thoughts inside my head.
Never could I have done this to any man ,
I can see you have no concious so I know you can.
There just one thing I really want to say about this ,
It's been a long time since I have made a clinched fist .
You have no idea how much hurt you have caused,
It won't be me you'll have to face That's up to God
But you will regret mistaking this kindness for weakness girl,
Bad Karma will surely consume you this is my word.
Yes you were able to catch me completely off gaurd ,
Never again because now I know who you are .
TAC

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know
Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know
Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that
You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know
You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me God, Help me to understand
You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel
How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door
You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me God, you owe me that much
Spiritual