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Saturday, September 27, 2008

Well, I’ve finally got a little time to devote to this blog, and I’ve decided to revive a feature called “Convention Finds”, wherein I review some of the various and sundry videos I’ve found while trolling the dealer tables.

Today’s little flick is Bad Ronald- a TV movie originally aired on October 23, 1974.

Let’s go back to 1970s- before there several hundred cable channels, before these channels broadcast 24 hours a day, before there were VCRs or DVD players. If you wanted to watch TV, you were at the mercy of the three major networks, PBS, and (if you were lucky to live near a large city) a few local UHF stations, all of which went off the air around 2 or 3 AM. To fill these limited viewing hours, the three majors aired more than just the standard sit-com and hour-long drama fare. They tried to be a bit more ambitious, and regularly aired their own movies.

And what movies they were- I remember my mom shuffling my sister and me off to bed so she could watch Helter Skelter, which carried a viewer warning that it might be too intense for younger viewer. I remember my mom being freaked out the day after seeing Trilogy of Terror, especially over the Zuni Doll episode. There was Steven Spielberg’s debut feature, Duel. There were two “Kolchak” movies, which led to the Nightstalker TV series. And there were so many more (Brian’s Song, Something for Joey, Born Innocent) that left their marks.

Looking back on these movies, they tended to have a lot in common. Their budgets were not that big, and some of the sets looked a little cheesy. Since “Made for TV” carried the same cachet as “Straight to video” does today, they didn’t really attract the big movie stars. Mostly they featured actors who had made their careers in television, and who weren’t appearing regularly in a series at the moment. The writing tended to be workmanlike, with the stories being efficiently told within the constraints of a 90-minute minus commercials running time. But the good ones certainly had a certain charm. And because of the previously-mentioned limited viewing options, they could reach a large audience, and, if they were especially memorable, could become part of the pop culture landscape.

Bad Ronald is one of those memorable movies- it certainly has a small cult following to this day. It’s got your TV character actor stalwarts- Dabney Coleman, John Fiedler, Linda Purl, Kim Hunter, and Pippa Scott. Buzz Kulik, the director, seems to have made quite a career out of directing TV movies- he also gave us Brian’s Song, and quite a few biographies (Babe, The Lindbergh Kidnapping, George Washington, Ziegfeld, and more). The script takes care of setting up the back-story quickly so we can get straight to the action, and resolves the story mighty quickly.

So what’s it all about?

Ronald is a high school geek who lives with his mom. In the first scene we learn that his parents are divorced and his mother wants Ronald to be a doctor so he can cure the unspecified medical condition that is slowly killing her. The other kids in school don’t like him, but his mom says it’s better that way- she can have him all to herself.

Ronald heads out to a popular girl’s house, where she and her popular friends are having a pool party. Of course, he gets laughed at when he asks her out, and he runs away, humiliated. He meets up with a 10-year-old girl, who also makes fun of him, telling him (and us) how disliked he is by the neighborhood. And to prove to us that she’s not lying about his defective personality, he knocks her down. The girl hits her head on a rock and dies.

The only thing Ronald can think of to do is to hide the body and then run home to confess everything to his mother. Mom feels that no one will ever believe that this was an accident, and that Ronald will never get to be a doctor, so she does the only sensible thing- she has Ronald wall off the door to a downstairs room, converting it into a secret room where Ronald can live until the whole thing blows over. She covers for Ronald when the police come by, telling them that he ran away.

Having nothing better to do while he’s waiting to be let out, he begins to create his own fantasy world. He writes and draws stories in which he is a prince, and he has a beautiful princess by his side. He makes occasional brief excursions out of his room to get food, but other than that, he’s pretty much a prisoner.

Some time later, Ronald’s mother gets sick and his taken to the hospital, where she dies. Ronald, unsure of what to do, remains in his secret room, drawing and writing. The house is soon sold to another family, one with three daughters. Ronald still makes the occasional food gathering trip, but now he has another reason to leave his prison- he has become infatuated with the youngest daughter, who, in Ronald’s mind, becomes the princess to his prince.

The family tries to shrug off the strange noises and disappearances of food, but it is affecting the youngest daughter, who thinks the house is haunted and that she’s being watched. As Ronald grows more delusional, he begins to see everyone as a threat to him and his “princess”. Things come to a head when he attacks the oldest sister’s boyfriend, imagining him as a devil that must be destroyed.

Things pick up rapidly from here, as Ronald is discovered. His hiding place is breached, the police arrest him, and he is dragged off to jail, crying and screaming.

A lot of people have fond memories of this movie, although, I must confess, I have no memory of it myself. (Strangely though, my wife remembers seeing it several times on TV in Ecuador.) So, when I managed to get a copy of it, I was able to look at it with fresh eyes, and without too many pre-conceived notions.

First off, I was surprised at how much of a dick Ronald was. He wasn’t somebody you could sympathize with easily. In fact, you can’t wait for him to get caught. From the beginning, when he maliciously knocks down and kills the little girl (and then buries the body), to the end when he stalks the youngest daughter, you find yourself liking him less and less.

I also like how there was really no fat in this script. This story had to be told in 74 minutes, and if that means that everyone must talk in exposition, well, then, dammit, exposition it will be. The movie opens on Ronald’s birthday where we learn his whole family history- you’ve got to wonder why Ronald and Mom have to remind each other of the divorce, or that, as part of the settlement Dad has agreed never to see Ronald again, or that mom is terribly ill. I liked that Ronald’s birthday presents were a tool kit and art supplies. Hmmm... do you think either one will play a part in future events?

Obviously, we are meant to see mom as someone who has an unhealthy level of influence on her child, as in Psycho or Carrie. But it’s a little too ham-handed, and Ronald is too much of a dick. If he were more sympathetic, like Carrie White, maybe we wouldn’t be rooting for him to get caught.

Still, all in all, this was a decent diversion. I’m not sure if I’ll ever watch it again, but at least now I can say I’ve seen it.

Friday, September 12, 2008

I've been in a bit of a reflective mood lately- I've been listening to some of the tapes I made when I was a DJ at grad school, and have been pretty much going through a late 80s/early 90s music kick.

So, in lieu of actually writing anything, here's a brief glimpse into what was spinning in my CD player way back in the (first) Bush years:

First up- "The Mayor of Simpleton" by XTC. To me, the best unrecognized pop band ever.

Matthew Sweet's "Girlfriend"- from one of my all-time favorite albums

Lloyd Cole's "Weeping Wine"- the song appeals to the sap in me.

The Connell's "74-75"- an even more criminally overlooked band than XTC.

And, as a bonus, "Make a Circuit With Me" by The Polecats. I saw the video once when the song first came out (about 1982 or so), and it's stuck in my mind ever since then. Thanks to the miracle of YouTube, after 26 years, I've been able to see it again.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Well, another Spring, another Chiller, another half-assed lazy post from me.

For a Spring Chiller, this year's guest list was surprisingly large, with a lot of great first-time guests. I was kind of exhausted at this one, because we had my daughter's birthday party the day before, and spending the day wrangling a bunch of 2-5 year-olds can take a lot out of you.

Still, I got some good signatures. Plus, I decided to spend some time combing the dealer room, and got three great DVDs, all of which will be making appearances in my soon-to-be-revived "Convention Find" series. But for that to happen, I'll need a little free time to actually watch the movies.

Until then, though, enjoy my shots-

First up, we had appearances from a few of the stars of one of my favorite comedies ever, Clerks. At the top are Brian O'Halloran and Marilyn Ghigliotti, aka Dante Hicks and Veronica "37" Loughran.

Next, looking not a bit like his alter-ego, we have Jason Mewes, aka Jay.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

My last two posts covered some ghostly occurrences that I, in some way, personally witnessed. This story is something that happened to my wife before she met me.

First, a little bit of background on the layout of her parents’ house- it’s a one-floor dwelling, and it only has windows in the front. Because of this, the only rooms that get any outdoor light are the kitchen, the living room, and her parents’ bedroom. All of the other rooms have small skylights in their ceilings, which let in a little sunlight. In the daytime, these rooms tend to be quite dim without some sort of electric light. At night, they’re pretty much pitch black.

The layout of the house is such that the only way into or out of my wife’s old bedroom is through her sister’s room. Pilar’s room was pretty quiet and isolated from the rest of the house.

Another thing to consider is Ecuadorian cemeteries. They are not like we are used to in America- nice green areas where everyone is buried underground. They are a little spookier- tending to be a bunch of small, above-ground nooks where the bodies are stored. They tend to resemble the portions of New Orleans cemeteries where the poor are buried- no elaborate mausoleums, just spaces that are big enough to hold the body. And those are the nicer ones.

Not too long before I met Pilar, odd things started happening around the house, especially at night. There was the occasional strange noise, doors that were supposed to be closed were left open, and vice versa. A few nights, when she was trying to sleep, Pilar noticed someone entering her room and looking in her closet. Thinking it was her sister, she would ask her what she wanted. Of course, the response would come back from her sister’s room, and not from the figure near the closet. Turning on the light would reveal no one standing there. Pilar also started having weird dreams about skeletons and dead people, and so were other members of her family.

These things were weirding everyone out, because no one knew why they were happening. Finally her father broke down and confessed that he had recently been in a cemetery and had seen some interesting rocks lying around, so he picked them up and took them home. He placed these rocks in his bedroom closet. Not too long after that was when the weirdness started.

It turned out that these were not rocks, but were actually bones. Of course, everyone begged him to return them to he found them. He was stubborn, and refused to. Finally, though, something happened that scared him, although he would never say what it was. This was his breaking point, and he returned the bones to the cemetery. All the scariness stopped after that.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

In an effort to thrill and chill all of my faithful readers, I've decided to go ahead and post a few more ghostly tales. These are all from the Hotel Antinea in Quito, Ecuador, where my wife used to work as the receptionist (and where I met her when I was on vacation).

I’m not really sure of the Antinea's history- it looks like a relatively old building- maybe 100 years or so, and perhaps was once a house that has been converted to a hotel. The front section has small rooms on the second. Most of these rooms face the street. In the back, there are 10 or so suites that all face out onto a small courtyard.

The most common occurrence is from guests who stay in the suites. Many of them ask about the blonde woman they saw in the courtyard. She has been described as having long hair, is dressed in an old-fashioned (19th century) style, and usually looks very sad. Most often she is seen looking in the windows of the suites, as if she’s searching from someone.

There’s also some weirdness going on in the single rooms, too. A few years ago, I went down there with my sister and some friends. My sister shared a room with my friend Olga. During the night they heard a lot of noise coming from the room next door- it sounded like someone was stumbling around drunkenly, moving furniture, and later they heard the sounds of vomiting coming from the room. The next day, they asked my wife if the guy in the room was OK. She told them that no one was in the room, and, in fact, it was completely empty as they were refurbishing it.

Room 12, though, seems to be the center of activity. Guests staying in the room have reported seeing a dark figure moving about at the foot of the bed. Usually the figure moves around the room and then jumps out the window into the garden below. The police have been called several times to investigate, and have searched the premises, but have never found anyone.

When I went to Ecuador to get married, I spent a couple nights before the wedding in that room. I never saw anything myself, but I did feel very uneasy, especially at night. For some reason, I was always too scared to look in any mirrors- I actively avoided them for my entire stay. I'd never gotten that feeling in any of the other rooms in the hotel. My wife actually didn't tell me about the other sightings until a couple years later- she figured that if I had known the stories, I wouldn't have wanted to stay in the room by myself (she’s right). She didn't even want to put me in the room at all, but the hotel was full that week, and that was the only room available. (That room is one of the nicest in the hotel, but, because of all the stories, they tend not to rent it out unless there are no other choices.)

So there you have it- a nice little haunted hotel in beautiful downtown Quito. If you’re ever in Ecuador, it’s definitely a nice place to stay. And, if you’re feeling especially brave, request Room 12.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

I saw this posted on the UK Sun, about a gnome that's been plaguing a town in Argentina. The video's pretty creepy- whatever it is looks odd, especially the way it walks. You'll see it around the 35 second mark.

Friday, March 07, 2008

If you click the "Slambo" link, you'll end up at Samantha's blog, where you can read a pretty cool, and very spooky, story of one of her paranormal experiences.

That story inspired me to tell one of my own. Originally, I had planned to post this around Halloween (appropriately enough, the anniversary of the event), but laziness got in the way, and I never did write it up. But now, however, you're in luck...

Halloween fell on a Saturday in 1998, so my friends and I decided a good place to celebrate the day would be in New Orleans. It's the perfect time to be there, seeing as it's a party city, and I would give it my vote as the spookiest and most haunted city in the US.

The weekend was a lot of fun- we had some excellent food, went to a lot bars, got to go out in public in our costumes and go to more bars, and then eat some more. You really can't ask for a whole lot more in a vacation.

I was sharing a room with my friends Rob and Hemsley. Rob was leaving Sunday evening, while Hemsley and I were going home on Monday morning. Sunday was pretty slow-paced- we were recovering from the night before, and we just walked around town, enjoying the sights before we had to head back to our regular lives.

In the morning before we started out I noted that there was no more soap left in the bathroom. As Hems and I were headed out early the next day, I made sure to stop by the front desk and ask for a couple bars. The porter assured us he would drop some off for us.

We went out walking, had our last meal together, and took Rob to the airport. Afterwards, Hems and I walked around some more, had dinner and went back to the hotel. My first stop was the bathroom to check on the soap (I can get kind of obsessive about things like this), but there was none. I called down to the front desk and they said they would bring some right up.

Hems went straight to sleep, but, since I had a later flight, I stayed up reading and waiting for the soap. After a while, my bladder started to need emptying, but I wanted to hold off until the soap came. When it looked as if it was never going to arrive, I went to the bathroom to answer the call of nature.

So, I'm in the loo, attending to business when I think I hear someone knocking on the door. "Perfect!" I thought- the porter arrives when I'm indisposed. Well, my bladder wasn't going to stop emptying just so I could answer the door, so I figured the porter was going to have to wait until I was finished.

After I was all emptied out and I had washed my hands, I headed toward the door. First thing I did was look through the peephole, but there was no one out there. I opened the door to see if maybe he had left the soap outside...

(Before I continue, let me describe the hallway. We were staying in a small hotel just off the French Quarter. Our room was at the end of the hall- to the right was the elevator and nothing else. To our left were a few more rooms. The other side of the hall was one long wall- all the rooms were on one side of the hall. The hall itself was pretty narrow- I could lean against one wall and touch the other wall with my palm. Basically, I'm saying that if anyone else was in the hall with me, I would have seen him.)

...I opened the door to see if maybe he had left the soap outside, but there was nothing. The floor was completely empty. Figuring that I had imagined hearing the knock on the door, I turned to go back into the room.

Just as I was turning, two bars of soap came out of nowhere and hit me squarely in the chest.

It was such a weird thing, that it didn't totally register. I took the soap, went inside, and got into bed. As I was drifting off to sleep it suddenly hit me what had happened. All I can say is I had a pretty restless night after that.

And that's my coolest ghost story. I have two more- one about the time I kept seeing possibly the lamest ghost ever, and a collection of tales from the hotel where my wife used to work.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Wow! First post of the new year! How are you all doing? I'm doing pretty well myself- the family's healthy, Sarah's growing like a weed, and scaring me with how smart she is.

How was your Christmas and New Year's? Ours was great- we spent three weeks in Quito with Pilar's family. It was our first trip there in over three years, and Sarah's first time ever. We survived the plane rides- Sarah was great both coming and going, a real trooper.

In lieu of anything more substantive, here are a few facts and figures from the trip:

Number of days spent in Quito: 21Highest elevation attained: 4100 meters at the TelefericoBooks read (in order):The Grin of the Dark (Ramsey Campbell), I Am America (And So Can You) (Stephen Colbert), Murder in Mesopotamia (Agatha Christie), A Confederacy of Dunces (John Kennedy Toole), Grotesque (Natsuo Kirino), Shadow Prey (John Sandford), The Queen of the South (Arturo Perez-Reverte).Number of cuy* eaten: 2Ratio of Cold Showers to Hot Showers: 4:1Number of "Best of Three" rounds of Volleyball played on New Year's Eve: 6Number of Sore Muscles on New Year's Day: How many are in the human body?New Words and Phrases Learned by Sarah: "Ai-Yi-Yi", Vayvo (huevo/egg), Chew (Mateo, her cousin), Dayo (Diego, another cousin), choo-choo (car or train)Number of pictures taken: 261Minutes of video taken: 108

------------------------* Cuy is an Ecuadorian delicacy, and one of my favorite foods- it's guinea pig, either barbecued or (my preference) battered and deep fried. It tastes a lot like rabbit.