10 women who can't orgasm through penetration on why it's still enjoyable

As we know, many (between 70 and 80% of women) don't reach orgasm through penetration or PIV (penis-in-vagina) sex. That's why it's so important not to think of penetration as the 'go-to' for hetereosexual couples. Plus, there are tons of amazingly satisfying sex things you can do that don't involve anything going in anywhere. At the same time, a good sexual experience doesn't necessarily need to end in an orgasm to be enjoyable. Often, the pressure we put on ourselves/others to come can be harmful in itself. Here, 10 women who never come through penetration explain why they still do it.

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1. "I find it creepy that just because a woman might not reach climax through penetration, that implies she isn't really enjoying the sex and is just doing it 'for the guy'. The vagina is full of nerves that experience all kinds of sensations, orgasm being only one of many forms of pleasure felt during sex for a woman. Just because a climax feels great, doesn't mean it's the be all and end all of sex. If anything it's only like 5-12 seconds of the entire experience." [via]

2. "I don't orgasm purely through penetration. For me personally, orgasm isn't the best part of sex. I wouldn't say sex was better when I orgasm than when I don't. The sensations I feel from PIV are very intense, and I'm not sure I would say they are less intense than orgasm, they are just a different 'type'. Orgasm has a feeling of a journey to it - a beginning, a middle and an end - so it's nice, but it's quite short. Orgasms for me last seconds, although they can be 'long' or 'short'. However, the non-orgasm sensations I feel are of about equal intensity but they don't end." [via]

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3. "I don't orgasm from PIV without a lot of clitoral stimulation. He makes sure I orgasm first, then we go to PIV. We do PIV because I love it too. Even though I don't orgasm from it, I still crave it and the intimacy that goes along with it". [via]

4. "I've never been able to orgasm with a partner, but I enjoy sex so much. The intimacy and the sensation itself - it just feels good! Maybe I don't know what I'm missing out on, but it's still great. I'm almost always DTF with my partner." [via]

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5. "I've never orgasmed from PIV sex, but 90% of the time will prefer that over what does get me to have an orgasm: oral sex. God, I love the feeling of PIV so much. But it doesn't make me have an orgasm. And I literally, literally couldn't care less." [via]

6. "I used to do it 'just because he wanted it' without worrying about myself for a long time. Now I make sure it's a fair trade off. PIV still feels good even though it can't get me there, and it can still be fun and intimate. I just make sure there's some clit play going on so I can get mine, too." [via]

7. "He gets me off orally, and I get him off with PIV or oral. It’s equal, both of us doing something for the other person to give them pleasure. I don’t have sex with anyone unless I want to have sex though." [via]

8. "It is very difficult for me to orgasm via PIV. But, as others have said, there is this misconception that just because we don't climax that way, we don't enjoy it. I love the sensation of being thrusted. It is pleasurable in its own way. There is the intimacy, the sensuality, the touch. That closeness. I absolutely love hearing my lover get excited and how he reacts." [via]

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9. "It still feels good. It doesn't need to be a begrudging, 'fine, just do it because you want to, I'll lay back and think of England' thing just because there's no orgasm involved. I don't orgasm from back massages, thrift shopping, or eating Oreos either, but I still do and enjoy those things." [via]

10. "I see a lot of people saying they don't mind not orgasming during PIV sex, and that's great. But personally, it's a real problem in my relationship. I'm pretty bitter about how my partner almost always gets to orgasm and I frequently don't (and when I do, I do the work). Yeah, sex isn't just about orgasms, but it's not a bad thing to want one." [via]

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