That&#039;s to much to think about all at once , but yes there&#039;s always that thought in the back of your mind , where did i come from what do they look like , will i be healthy . Especially when you have children . You could also get hit by a bus , life&#039;s to short it seems this may be our only chance at it. My advice would be not to worry so much about what you can&#039;t change and focus on whats in front of you ,,Live for the day.. hope this helps . It happened and it&#039;s a tragedy , I don&#039;t like it any more than you believe me , but I&#039;m glad that there are people like yourself because in some weird way i think that living through all the crap that life throws at us we have proved time and time again that we will survive . Not only that but are more willing to extend out or hand for the person in need ..

I would not have been able to put those feelings into words, but I have always felt like the lone hero in my own story. No wonder I love Disney movies.

Adoptee 15198, I did the opposite of denial.
As a child I told people that I was adopted often because I thought it made me special.
As I grew older I realized most of the time it just made me feel more alone.

As far as wondering about what may run in my biologic background, YES.
My Aparents had many inherited health problem. I was glad that I didn&#039;t have to worry about those.
Then when I had children I started to worry what may be lurking in my own family medical history(especially when the doctor asks).
I became a health nut since them. At least I&#039;m doing everything in my power to counteract what may be there.

And, YES.
To combat that all alone feeling I have spent a lot of time and energy reading books and Google&#039;ing
all I can find on the experience of the adopted persons. It sure did help me understand a lot about myself.

This jumbled up mess is something that I made up. I probably could have written a nicer journal type essay out of this but I didn&#039;t. I have been doing alot of thinking and my head has been all over the place if you can&#039;t tell when it comes to this post.

I am searching for another job and not having a good experience with my Private Investigator either right now. Looking for another job helps me to stay busy and distracted and has helped me to stop my search but it hasn&#039;t helped everything but I&#039;m dealing in the best possible way that I can.

You see . . . you sound just like a knight, or Joan of Arc. You may stumble through the forest at times, but the Quest is before you, the Grail, as always, is partially revealed if that. And yet you scramble over fallen trees, and wade through countless bogs on your journey, all the while lit by something shining within. This is real mythological stuff happening, right here on the ground. In 2008. If this is not poetic, then what, prey tell is?

Most heros don&#039;t know about their own deeds (not really), and alot of heros would just as soon be playing golf, or paying close attention to their stock portfolios.
But every one here, every one who lives sometimes in the shadow of longing, who wants the circle to mend and be unbroken, is a hero. What more worthy a quest then the quest for Personhood itself?

That&#039;s the role I played for my Afamily. There were a lot of problems with with my oldest abrother that really made my aparents life extremely challenging. my Amother had innumerable health problems and both my aparents had heart disease/multiple heart attacks/open heart surgery/spine surgery/degenerative joint disease, depression, emphysema, dementia,ect.......
The extended family made sure I understood that I was in there life to take care of them and not cause any stress for anyone.
It worked for me to believe I was an angel and this was my purpose, until both my parents had passed away and my brothers were M.I.A. along with all the extended family.

So now my rational for my adoption includes the story of the angel brought to earth to look after my parents, and was left to use her free will to chose her own life once that job was complete.

A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...

Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...

All content posted on this site is the responsibility of the party posting such content.
Participation on this site by a party does not imply endorsement of any other party's content,
products, or services. Content should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.