Clemkadidlefark:A friend in California was invited to voluntarily quit his job as a highly qualified MRI Tech because - due his respectful upbringing - he insisted on the honorific Ma'am when addressing female patients and colleagues.

After numerous complaints that Ma'am was degrading to women it was suggested to him - by a woman - he'd be 'happier' elsewhere.

Biatches don't know nothin about respect

How many jobs has your friend 'quit' because he was 'too respectful'?

/I've never heard anyone say they were fired for doing something wrong.

draypresct:Donnchadha: MythDragon: Me: So...you like...heal paintings?Ass: ...No. I study them.Me: And I should call you doctor because...?Ass: I earned it.Me:Yeah? Well, tell you what. As soon as you start calling me Staff Sergeant, I'll call you by your title.Ass: You're not in uniform.Me: Neither are you.Then it was time to find a drink.

He might have been a pretentious asshole, but you were being a dick too

The conversation passed the point of no return on the asshole front when someone insisted on being addressed by their academic title in a social setting*. I don't even see a way to withdraw from the conversation that early in a classy way without outside help.

I also thought it was kind of funny, but that's beside the point.

/*It's no more appropriate than a high-level martial artist insisting on being addressed as "master" everywhere he/she goes.

When someone says

Nice to meet you Mr Smith,Actually it's DoctorOh, Nice to meet you Doctor Smith, (note you don't first say "oh, you a surgeon or sumptin?")

Carry on a polite coversation, maybe even ask in what field he is in but make a mental note that your dealing with a dick, and exit quiickly.

Unless he's a medical doctor, then say "hey doc, can you take a look a this? -drop you pants- Does this look infected to you?"

Necronic:Who in the world would refer to a professor by their first name? That's absurd. It's "Prof. Soandso", or in some cases, its just "Soandso" (usually when I was angry, like "Soandso's test really screwed me"). I never use the first name.

It's the same reason I would call my friends parents Mr and Mrs Whatshisname when I was young. Now that I am older its a bit more confusing, but I still usually just default with the Mr/Mrs. Its also why I get rankled when a salesman calls me by my first name. You don't know me. You call me Mr. Uptight.

But anyways, its just common decorum. There's nothing really clever or rebellious about ignoring it, its just ignorant and disrespectful. That said feel free to call your TA's whatever you want, and try and get drunk with them if you can

I am a woman, I teach freshmen algebra. I try to get my students to call me by my first name. Most of my students are terrified of math and I want them to not be intimidated by me. Most of them can't bring themselves to call me by my first name. I did have one semester where two students in my class already knew me from before the class and called me Zanni.

I teach as part of my job. I don't care what they call me- Dr. Hero, Mr. Hero, Professor Hero, Glockenspiel, etc, all I ask is that they pronounce my (tricky) last name correctly. Ironically, most end up calling me Professor which is the one title that's not correct- I'm staff even though I have a Ph.D. Every year I get a couple who call me by my first name- you can tell it's sort of a "I'm not in high school anymore- can I get away with this?" thing, which is fine by me.

A few years back we had a visiting ABD (All But Doctorate) professor from Africa who refused to call anyone anything other than "Dr. XXXX", even his coworkers in social situations. He explained that where he came from folks with the title had earned it and that it was only proper courtesy. There was a minor celebration at one faculty lunch when it was announced that his thesis was accepted and he could start using our first names.

Our grad department was a very lax environment, but we had a rule for consistency (and in case some landlubber took one of our courses).

While class is in session, call your professor "Doctor (Last Name)". Outside of that, you can be on a first-name basis if you choose.

We also had a few other rules for general professionalism and decorum:

You weren't allowed to get your professor drunk the night before an exam.

You could sleep on the couch in the classroom if you were going to be in the building all night, but you couldn't do so naked.

Same goes for riding your bike in the hall after-hours.

It is completely unacceptable to use the bathroom for discussions pertaining to conspiracy. That went double for the women's restroom.

And very related to the previous rule, professors were explicitly barred from playing Diplomacy with any student if they were on that student's thesis committee. Especially if that student is playing as Germany or Austria.

A few months ago I started a new job at a large university and I continually have to look up email signatures or titles in our directory to get things right, and it's almost absurd because I'm not anyone's student. However, it did lead to an amusing exchange with one of my staff members who recently got his PhD. We've been trying to get a 1,200 node grid off the ground and the research chair who is first in line to use it spends most of his days harassing the staff about when it's going to be set up. My lead engineer, who I'll call Thomas, has been butting heads with the chair, who I'll call Dr. Richard Antsypants.

All three of us were in the data center last week troubleshooting. I've been on a first name basis with Richard since the beginning and we're talking like we usually do. Thomas is explaining that no one can submit jobs yet because the Qlogic cards aren't working correctly and he calls Dr. Antsypants 'Richard', at which point Richard says "I'm a doctor." Without missing a beat, Thomas said "So am I, but it doesn't seem to help for this particular issue."

I waited for a pissing contest to break out, but Richard laughed and now everyone is on a first name basis. Students should defer to their instructors, but outside of that relationship you have to be a real jerk to start throwing titles around. I don't make people call me Director LSherm at work and Thomas sure as hell doesn't make anyone call him Dr. Thomas. In a formal setting, like during first introductions? Sure, the title is appropriate. If you're going to be working with someone who isn't your student for an extended period of time? Be reasonable.