“People don’t change... without strong motivation and sustained effort. Most people learn little from experience, rarely thinking of adjusting their behaviour, see problems as emanating from those around them, and keep on doing what they do in spite of everything, for better or worse.” –A.S.A Harrison

Week 16

“People don’t change... without strong motivation and sustained effort. Most people learn little from experience, rarely thinking of adjusting their behaviour, see problems as emanating from those around them, and keep on doing what they do in spite of everything, for better or worse.” –A.S.A Harrison

Alicia's Musing

Binge triggers do not disappear. They may go into hiding, but when you are stressed, open the door and they will be there to greet you with air kisses and a wink. They have been in the parking lot doing push-ups all along and you just didn’t see them.

Even though I may go months without them, I expect those triggers, and try to put some strategies into place so they do not blindside or control me. When I have a goal, it is easier for me to eat well and exercise, so I try to set short, mid and long term goals for myself. But I am human like everyone else and I need to continue to be aware of my choices.

Look at it this way – if your son or daughter came to you and said they wanted to eat half a cheesecake or a large bag of chips, what would you say? In all likelihood, you would probably say that is not good for them and perhaps offer an alternative. So, why can’t we do that for ourselves as adults? Because when we binge it is not to feed our bodies but to feed our low spirits, and the desire to make ourselves feel better right that second is very compelling.

So what to do? Ask yourself: “What is going on with me? Why am I about to eat this?” Try to identify the underlying reason in your life that is pushing you to try to make yourself feel better. Are you depressed? Are you worried? Do you dislike your job? Are you in pain? Kids driving you crazy? Spouse making you crazier? Are you exhausted? Overwhelmed? Cause if you are, then eating is not going to resolve those issues. You will just keep wrapping yourself in bandages of fleeting food comfort until one day you can’t move at all, like the mummy in those old horror movies.

Bingeing isn’t eating. It is coping.

I recently had a great get together with some old friends of mine. These are ‘foodies’, so the conversation included latest food trends, newly released studies and our personal struggles. One woman was recently diagnosed with lupus; she lost 45 pounds and had just weaned herself off her medications, which she believes was because she started eating well. For her, that meant lots of fruits and vegetables, and no white flour, sugar or rice, less red meat and fat in general. So, what do you think she brought for dessert? A store bought carrot cake slathered in cream cheese frosting. Wow, I thought. That includes just about everything she says she doesn’t eat. Out of the 5 of us, 2 had none, and the others had pieces so small that almost the whole cake was left.

Adjusting your behavior is tough. You become hardwired after years of doing things a certain way. I do understand why she brought it. The cake has the word ‘carrot’ in it so it has to better for you, right? It was small and so was our gathering so she figured it would be appropriate, and she didn’t have time to make anything. But how about a fruit tray and a small bar of dark chocolate? Melt the chocolate down with some skim milk and – voila – chocolate fondue. I can guarantee you that if she had done that everyone would have had some dessert.

Stay connected to your goals. Have good food in your house that is ready to eat in an instant. If the compulsion to eat those chicken wings is really strong, go for a walk first, then see if you still want them. Or decide you are going to have that food once per month only. Replace food as a reward. Go for a walk, run, cycle. Go to the museum, shopping, movies, book store. Rent a movie. Think about some strategies, some alternate pleasure before you are in the moment of need. New earrings work for me!

And see those binge triggers for the false friends they are. Envision a life where you have time for yourself and are happy and fit. That can be pretty compelling too!

Binge triggers do not disappear. They may go into hiding, but when you are stressed, open the door and they will be there to greet you with air kisses and a wink. They have been in the parking lot doing push-ups all along and you just didn’t see them.

Even though I may go months without them, I expect those triggers, and try to put some strategies into place so they do not blindside or control me. When I have a goal, it is easier for me to eat well and exercise, so I try to set short, mid and long term goals for myself. But I am human like everyone else and I need to continue to be aware of my choices.

Look at it this way – if your son or daughter came to you and said they wanted to eat half a cheesecake or a large bag of chips, what would you say? In all likelihood, you would probably say that is not good for them and perhaps offer an alternative. So, why can’t we do that for ourselves as adults? Because when we binge it is not to feed our bodies but to feed our low spirits, and the desire to make ourselves feel better right that second is very compelling.

So what to do? Ask yourself: “What is going on with me? Why am I about to eat this?” Try to identify the underlying reason in your life that is pushing you to try to make yourself feel better. Are you depressed? Are you worried? Do you dislike your job? Are you in pain? Kids driving you crazy? Spouse making you crazier? Are you exhausted? Overwhelmed? Cause if you are, then eating is not going to resolve those issues. You will just keep wrapping yourself in bandages of fleeting food comfort until one day you can’t move at all, like the mummy in those old horror movies.

Bingeing isn’t eating. It is coping.

I recently had a great get together with some old friends of mine. These are ‘foodies’, so the conversation included latest food trends, newly released studies and our personal struggles. One woman was recently diagnosed with lupus; she lost 45 pounds and had just weaned herself off her medications, which she believes was because she started eating well. For her, that meant lots of fruits and vegetables, and no white flour, sugar or rice, less red meat and fat in general. So, what do you think she brought for dessert? A store bought carrot cake slathered in cream cheese frosting. Wow, I thought. That includes just about everything she says she doesn’t eat. Out of the 5 of us, 2 had none, and the others had pieces so small that almost the whole cake was left.

Adjusting your behavior is tough. You become hardwired after years of doing things a certain way. I do understand why she brought it. The cake has the word ‘carrot’ in it so it has to better for you, right? It was small and so was our gathering so she figured it would be appropriate, and she didn’t have time to make anything. But how about a fruit tray and a small bar of dark chocolate? Melt the chocolate down with some skim milk and – voila – chocolate fondue. I can guarantee you that if she had done that everyone would have had some dessert.

Stay connected to your goals. Have good food in your house that is ready to eat in an instant. If the compulsion to eat those chicken wings is really strong, go for a walk first, then see if you still want them. Or decide you are going to have that food once per month only. Replace food as a reward. Go for a walk, run, cycle. Go to the museum, shopping, movies, book store. Rent a movie. Think about some strategies, some alternate pleasure before you are in the moment of need. New earrings work for me!

And see those binge triggers for the false friends they are. Envision a life where you have time for yourself and are happy and fit. That can be pretty compelling too!