Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Farenheit 51

I don't have an office at work. I sit in a radio studio all day. When I'm not on the air I write sports updates. Basically, I spend at least 6 consecutive hours of my day in the studio.

I tell you this because it's so freaking cold in the studio that I can barely think. In fact, everyone that enters the studio comments on the cold. Ironically we have a thermostat in the studio! Unfortunately, the thermostat is always turned up to the top (90 degrees - yeah right) and it doesn't seem to work.

Really, the only thing anyone talks about in the studio is the cold. Maybe there is some small chit-chat about life but then back to the temperature. Our daily conversations usually include many if not all of the following 10 questions:

1) Is this a legal work environment?

2) If so, can we sue?

3) Who can we contact to fix the A/C?

4) How hard is it to fix the f*#@ing A/C? (We've been bitching about this for almost a year)

5) What reason is there for keeping the studio this cold (Sometimes we hear it's because of the equipment - I say that's bullshit)

6) What do you think the actual temperature is? (The guesses range from 30 to 60)

7) Did you press the button? (See #8)

8) What does the button do? (There is a button on the thermostat that 'allegedly' doesn't do anything - the urban legend is that by pressing it repeatedly you can make the studio warmer)

9) Can we open the door? (We assume that the warm air from outside will come in)

10) Can we close the door? (Anything to change our luck)

I'm tired of wearing a jacket to work in June. Other people stare at me. I welcome all suggestions on how to warm up the studio. It gets so cold that I will often go to the restroom where it's 75 degrees but smells like stale urine. Please help me.