Power oatmeal

This fantastic cooking website is called Kosher Kollege, emphasis on “Kollege.” With that being said, we are no longer five or thirteen. Therefore, it is no longer acceptable to be making instant dinosaur oatmeal in the microwave for breakfast. Plus, for most of us it’s almost graduation and we know what’s after graduation. That’s right. You guessed it… Shidduch season. If you think it’s acceptable to serve your wife dinosaur oatmeal for breakfast, in your New York City apartment on 94th street during your Sheva Brachos, then you’re wrong, and expect a Get in the near future. It would be equally as criminal to serve her that Jon Galitzer, “El Desperado” recipe, or whatever you call that landfill-looking meal. No, it’s time to make some real oatmeal. Therefore, without further ado, it’s time for the healthiest, best tasting oatmeal breakfast you’ll ever make.

WARNING: THIS HAS A TON OF HEALTHY NUTRIENTS AND EVEN MORE FIBER. IF YOU’RE ON THE GO, BE ABLE TO LOCATE THE CLOSEST RESTROOM IN CASE OF EMERGENCY. IF YOU HAPPEN TO BE TAKING THE BUS TO CAMPUS AND IT HITS YOU, CHAS VESHALOM, SAY YOUR “AL CHATES” AND MAY HASHEM BE WITH YOU.

Ingredients:

(3g fat, 21g protein, 8g+ fiber, lots of vitamins & antioxidants)

Full oats or if you’re a real perfectionist like myself, Bob’s Red Mill Oats

1 Egg

Raisins

Honey

Cinnamon

Vanilla Extract

Strawberries or Blueberries (if you want to be fancy)

Directions:

The night before pour a little more than a handful of oats into a pot.

Pour some milk in there, enough to cover the oats, and then a little more. Stir it up.

Put it in the fridge and wait til morning.

So now it’s 7am, you’ve already Davened Vasikin, it’s time to take those oats out. (The oats should be slightly bigger, having become softened through absorbing the milk).

You don’t want your oats to be too runny or too oaty, so if you think a little more milk would do, then go for it. (If you happen to be a wizard and poured a perfect amount the night before, Mazel Tov, no one cares).

NOW, put it on the stove, throw some raisins in there, and heat that puppy up on high.

While it’s heating up, take an egg. Yes an egg. Crack it in a bowl and stir it up. (This would also be a good time to cut up the berries if you’re adding them in).

Stir the oats and once the oats show the slightest indication of boiling on the sides, pour that stirred up egg in there and mix it thoroughly.

Once the oatmeal starts to boil, give it a few stirs, and take it off the stove and pour it in a bowl.

Now add a healthy dose of honey and cinnamon, and a tablespoon or more of vanilla extract. Stir it all up and take a bite of Shamayim. You’re welcome.