COMPLETE! This is the story of Sarah, a Chinese girl adopted by an English family. What will happen to her when the family falls apart, and what of Jack, the mysterious friend Sarah makes? I've put every two chapters together, to make them longer.

Neither Momma nor I knew when Jack was going to be
discharged from hospital. All we knew was that it would be sometime during the
day. Momma rang several times to try and find out the time, but nobody would
tell her because she wasn't related to Jack. As for me, I felt alright. I'd had
a rough night, and a rough morning, but I knew that I would be fine as soon as
I was in Jack's arms.

The
time slowly began to tick by, and soon it was five o'clock. Momma began to put some
dinner together, baked potato and salad so that if Jack wasn't back by the time
it was ready, it wouldn't be ruined. I could hear a telephone ringing, and it
was Jack's. Anthony's face appeared in my mind, and I suddenly remembered that
he had been expecting us home the previous evening.

"Anthony,
I am so sorry that we didn't call you yesterday," I said. I had totally
forgotten because of the circumstances, and Anthony wasn't going to like what
had happened to his brother. I knew I would have to lie.

"What
happened?" Anthony asked.

"My
momma's been a bit ill the last two or three days. It's only mild food
poisoning I think, but we decided to stay an extra day or two just to be sure
that she's alright." I gulped, hoping that Anthony was believing what I said.
"I thought Jack had called you already," I continued. "I'll have to shout at him
for this!" At the other end of the telephone, Anthony laughed, and I was glad
that he wasn't angry at Jack and I.

"Don't
worry about it," Anthony told me. "Send your mom my best wishes," he added, and
I thanked him for thinking of her, smiling inside for a moment because
Anthony's kindness was really something else. I didn't know anyone else as
laidback and out-and-out friendly as Anthony.

Jack
finally returned just as Momma was getting ready to serve up dinner. I quickly
set another place at the table when I saw a taxi pull up outside. I wasn't
going to rush out and greet Jack, because I guessed that he'd want to gather
his thoughts together before he came in. Just as I suspected, he knocked on the
door before entering. In the kitchen with Momma now, she looked at me, asking
me with her eyes if I was going to go and answer the door, or if I wanted her
to. I didn't know whether I was prepared for an emotional scene like the one
coming, but I did know that I just wanted Jack to hold me.

I
answered the door.

"Sarah,"
Jack's eyes looked hopefully at me as though he had thought he would never see
me again- and really, that thought must have crossed his mind at one point.
There were a thousand things that I wanted to say, but the words just didn't
seem to be there. I held out my hands to Jack, and took both of his hands into
them, pulling him into the house. He pushed the door shut behind him.

"Your
hair," I murmured, the first words I could manage. I touched Jack's hair which
now didn't reach his shoulders. It came to just below his ears, and it suited
him, really suited him, but it seemed like another change that I wasn't ready
for.

"When
I left the hospital this morning, I needed to do something to feel like a newer
person."

"This
morning?" I asked. "It's five o'clock now. You've been out all day."

"I'll
explain later," Jack promised. "I'm sorry if you hate my hair, but I like it,
and it'll grow back."

"No,
no," I assured him. "I love it."

"Sarah,"
Jack began, but Momma appeared in the hallway. She smiled at Jack, a genuine
smile because she too had been immensely worried about him.

"Are
you hungry?" she asked him simply, and he looked at me. There had been
something else that he wanted to say, but now Momma had interrupted, and he'd
lost his nerve.

"It's
alright," Jack said. "I bought some more today. But why did you smoke the ones
I'd left here?"

"I
don't know," I admitted, and this was completely true. Soon we were all sitting
in the dining room. I wasn't hungry at all, and I hardly touched my baked
potato, only chewing on a small amount of salad so that Momma didn't make me
feel guilty for not eating. Jack ate solidly, hardly talking at all.

"Momma,"
I said, when nobody could manage any more small talk, "Jack and I are going to
go upstairs and talk. I'd rather you just left us alone for a while."

"Of
course," Momma said with a nod of her head, and Jack looked surprised. Still,
he stood up and followed me as I went upstairs. I knew he was nervous, and I
also knew that he probably had a very good idea of what I want to talk about.
We went into my room, and sat side by side on the bed. I looked into Jack's
eyes for the longest time, and although he tried to smile at me, I could still
see the pained expression he wore hidden away behind his false happiness.

"Before
you say anything, I want you to know that I'm sorry, Sarah. I'm so sorry." Jack
hung his head, unable to meet my eyes anymore.

"I
just wish you'd talked to me about it first," I said. "That's what hurt the
most, Jack. Knowing that you didn't think you could tell me how you were really
feeling. I wish you really loved me. You've led me on again."

"I
haven't!" Jack looked shocked, as though he didn't understand how I could reach
that conclusion. "I've fought this depression for a long, long time, Sarah.
Sometimes I get the better of it, and sometimes it gets the better of me.
You need to understand that I do love you, I just don't love myself. I need you
to love me, because otherwise I'll want to die."

"I
thought you did want to die," I said bitterly. Jack shook his head.

"I
didn't think before I acted," he told me. "I'm used to living alone and relying
on myself. I forgot that I've got you to look after as well as myself now." I
looked hard into Jack eyes, and nervously, he shuffled in the spot where he was
sitting, and it seemed as though he wanted to just get up and run away. "I'm
sorry, Sarah," Jack told me again. "There's nothing else I can say. Please,
just forgive me."

"No,"
I told him. "I can't forgive you. I will one day, but I need more time. I've
got to get my head around everything first."

"I
understand," Jack said, and now his voice was almost a whisper. "I've got
something to show you though. I tried to tell you downstairs. I wanted to bring
you straight up here, but your momma appeared at the wrong moment."

"What
do you want to show me?" I asked. Jack stood up, clearing his throat as though
he were about to make a speech. He undid his jeans, and slipped them down far
enough for me to see his angel tattoo. Below it, there was my name, Sarah in
small curvy letters.

"Oh…"
I uttered, unable to think of a single word to express how I was feeling. I
glanced up at Jack again. "Is it real?" I asked. He nodded.

"You
can touch it," he told me, "but it's still sore. I only had it done today."

"So
that's where you've been?" I asked. Jack nodded.

"I
know you were probably worried about me, you and Lucy both. I just needed more
time to gather myself together when I came out of hospital." Jack did his
trousers up again, and smiled at me. There was some of his old self in his eyes
again- he no longer looked so sad or troubled, and I could sense relief there
as well, relief that I still loved him after what he had just put me through.
"I wanted to show you that you're my world," Jack told me. "I know you must
think me ridiculous, but this is the only way I knew how to do it."

"No,
no," I told him. "None of this is ridiculous, Jack." I kissed each of his eyes,
and then I softly kissed his lips just once.

We left for London the following morning. This time, I had
three large bags with me, and Jack just had the small one that he had come
with. It was cold at the station, and the train was late. We had a half hour
wait before it arrived, so we sat on a bench together, the bags around our
feet. Jack's arm was around my shoulder, pulling me closer to him so I stayed
warm. In his other hand was a cigarette, and he talked to me as he smoked, not
about anything in particular.

When
we arrived, we had already arranged to make our own way to the bar. We came in
through the back door which was left unlocked, and went straight to the office
where Anthony was most likely going to be. When he saw us both, he grinned from
ear to ear. Although we had both spoken to him on the telephone several times
since we'd been away, it had been several weeks since we'd seen him.

"How
did everything go?" he asked jovially. Jack and I both responded with vague
answers, saying that things were now fine, and that I could stay and commit
myself properly to the bar at last. We had decided not to tell Anthony about
what had really happened. Jack wanted to keep it a secret, and I respected
that.

The day after we'd been back, I spent the day out on my
own, preparing a surprise for Jack. I wanted to show him that I was dedicated
to him in the same way that he had shown me. I slipped into his room that
night, when he had just got into bed.

"Are
you asleep?" I asked.

"No,"
he shook his head.

"Turn
the lamp on," I told him, and he did. I was still fully dressed, but as he
watched me, I slipped my skirt off and turned to the side so that Jack could
see my hip. He saw the tiny black rose, with a letter J entwined in it's stem,
and he didn't say a word, just drawing me into his embrace.

Before I knew it, a week had gone by and I had slipped
straight back into the routine of playing the piano in the bar every night,
loving each moment of it. I had sung once or twice as well, something else I
had really enjoyed doing.

"Do
you want a drink?" I asked Jack one day. I was standing in the kitchen, and the
final act for that night was playing downstairs.

"No
thanks," Jack came up behind me, sliding his arms around my waist. Since we'd
been back, Jack's confidence was soaring. He showed so much affection for me,
and he didn't seem to mind who was there when he did this like he had before.
He was still a private person though, and he liked to have me to himself a lot.

"I'm
having a coffee, then I'm going to bed," I told him.

"Can
I come too?" He kissed my cheek, and I turned around so that I was facing him
now. Leaning back against the sideboard, Jack and I kissed longer, harder.

"Maybe
you two should think about getting a place of your own," Anthony said. Jack
jumped, stepping back from me and blushing.

"But
we like it here," I told Anthony. I smiled, more at Jack's nerves than anything
else.

"Perhaps
I should move out then," Anthony said with a laugh. Really though, Jack
and I both knew that Anthony loved having us around. I had begun to help
Anthony with the paperwork as well, giving him more free time to himself, which
was something that he hadn't had much of at all before.

When
Anthony left the room, Jack turned back to me.

"So,"
he asked again, "can I come with you?"

"Of
course," I said. "Your bed or mine?"

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