Frank Talk: Daylight come and I wanna go home

Thursday

Aug 28, 2014 at 2:56 PMAug 28, 2014 at 2:56 PM

By Frank MulliganMore Content Now

Are you a morning person?

If so, why?

Perhaps you’re undecided on the topic.

If so, the following quiz will help you decide whether a) you are indeed a morning person, b) you are more enamored of other times in the day, or c) you could have spent your time more profitably napping.

The quiz begins below. (You know, with the questions.)

Do the sounds of birds chirping first thing in the morning a) fill you with joy that another day has begun, b) make you want to close the window, c) inspire you to get your hunting license renewed.

What song lyric best describes your mood upon awakening in the morning: a) “The hills are alive with the sound of music,” b) “insane in da membrane, insane in da brain,” c) “That long black cloud is comin’ down, I feel I’m knockin’ on heaven’s door.”

What phrase best describes your mood upon awakening in the morning: a) seize the day, b) another day, another dollar, c) please give me five more minutes.

Does the proverbial saying, “the early bird catches the worm,” fill you with a) inspiration, b) quiet bemusement, c) the desire to point out that getting up early didn’t work out so great for the worm.

As a child, when your mother came to wake you, did you routinely say, a) good morning, mother, isn’t it a lovely day, b) mom, please give me five more minutes, c) mom (cough, cough), I think I’m coming down with something.

What’s your take on people who are always cheerful in the morning: a) they’re delightful, b) they can be trying, c) they’re not very observant.

What’s the best way to start the day: a) with a hearty home-cooked breakfast, b) with a cup of steaming hot coffee, c) with whatever’s left on the coffee table from last night.

How would colleagues describe your demeanor in the morning: a) sweet and charming, b) a bit harried, c) be afraid, be very afraid.

What time is your first smile of the day: a) the moment I open my eyes, b) after my fourth cup of coffee while watching “Rocky and Bullwinkle,” c) between my second nap at work and lunch.

What’s the best means of waking you in the morning: a) I wake up without any help whatsoever, b) a good-old fashioned alarm clock with a loud ring, c) convince me the building is not only on fire but the flames are rapidly approaching my bedroom.

The quiz is now complete. (You know, no more questions.)

If you answered C three times, you are not a morning person.

If you answered C more than three times and want to put the results into a lifestyle context, I recommend you get a good night’s sleep, grab a nap and then sleep on it.

Wareham Courier editor Frank Mulligan can be reached at fmulligan@wickedlocal.com.