Emmy Predictions 2013: Reality and Variety

The lack of unsupervised children in my neighborhood this week alerted me to a wondrous revelation: Fall is coming. And with fall comes a bevy of new television shows for me to rip apart for your enjoyment. But before we can get to that we need to celebrate the truly great TV offerings of last year. If you're like me you celebrate this passing of the torch by camping out on your couch, judging celebrity outfits and getting way too invested in who takes home a little gold statue. If you're not like me then you're really missing out.

In the next few weeks leading up to the Emmy's (on September 22nd) I will roll out my predictions for who the winners should and will be. If you have your own ballot pool, follow my advice at you're own risk. Everyone else, enjoy my scintillating thoughts about supporting actors in made for TV movies. I know you've been dying to hear my thoughts on the matter.

We're gonna ease into this awards thing with the easiest and least important category: Reality TV.

Note: As always, when I say will win I am basing it off of the current odds and buzz from people far more in the know than myself and when I say should win I mean in my own biased and deeply personal opinion.

Both Cat and Tom get to show off their quick thinking talents by hosting live shows. Tom has the advantage of being in the business for decades and there is no one quicker with a quip than him. If this category were judged on sheer joy radiating from the host than Cat would win it hands down. But it’s not and Tom will take it (deservedly) once again.

OUTSTANDING REALITY SHOW COMPETITIONThe Amazing Race (2012 WINNER)Dancing With the StarsProject RunwaySo You Think You Can DanceTop ChefThe Voice

Who Should Win: So You Think You Can Dance

Who Will Win: The Amazing Race

Does SYTYCD showcase more talent and provide more entertainment than any other reality show currently airing? Sure. But The Amazing Race always wins. Why should that change now?

The Daily Show is kind of like The Amazing Race, it keeps winning because it already won. You could argue that both shows are consistently fantastic and therefore deserve their abundance of recognition and you’d be right. The trouble is that constantly awarding the same show for doing the same (admittedly groundbreaking and great) work allows for a lot of equally great work to go unnoticed.

What exactly was the criterion for nominating these reality shows? A median audience age of 85? Ignoring for a moment that these nominees are some of the lamest and most basic shows available, they hardly even qualify as reality. I’m not suggesting that The Real Housewives should be getting Emmy nominations, but at least that’s an example of actual reality television. It’s like the Emmy board found all the actual reality television shows too offensive to their delicate palates so they found the most inoffensive shows that could loosely be described as reality and nominated them. If reality TV is too low brow for you, Emmy board, then just don’t have the category because this is a joke. Anyway, predictions, Shark Tank (which is a competition, by the way) currently has the odds, but at least Deadliest Catch is exciting and an actual reality program.

Well that was kind of dull, wasn't it? No worries, next week we'll move on to Mini Series and Made for TV Movies wherin Spoiler Alert! I will heap praise onto Top of the Lake and generally ignore the other offerings. Is it because that's the only one I've seen or is it because its one of the only ones I've seen and I hate Ryan Murphy? Tune in next week to find out!

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