Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Staying Stopped. I am so Grateful that I don't start up my bad habits. I'm Grateful that I have continued to have the strength to not want to go back to my old ways of drugging and drinking. I have 0% desire to do so. I am asked if I miss a drink or letting loose now and then? For the first time in my life I can say no, I don't miss the use of drugs and alcohol. I have learned to let loose without them, I'm more real now than I was then. Life has gotten so much better. I would miss the way my life has changed for the better and how I handle it.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

My Spirituality, my recovery and that I think of it on a daily basis, AA, my family - I'm one of the fortunate people that has all kinds of family, friends - even the ones I don't know what to do with, my talents - learning how to focus on them more, a home, choices and learning to pick the right one, another day on the planet.

Monday, June 28, 2010

I am more aware of my thoughts and actions. There is a side to being sober and clean that sometimes can be different than when I was living obliviously. I seem to be more aware of situations and judgments. I try to be kind before I chose to be an asshole. This sometimes make a situation more difficult because I want to be kind. By being kind I chose to ignore the situation. I know I will eventually come to the right answer as to how to deal with the situation. I am Grateful today that I am gentle with my words.

Friday, June 25, 2010

My continued desire to stay sober and clean. There was a time in my life I never thought about how wonderful life is to NOT do drugs and drink. Today that is always in the forefront of my thoughts. It's also very present when I am around other people deep in their alcohol and drug addictions. It really amazes me that today I seem like two different people. I am so Grateful for the way my life has turned out before it was too late.

In Houston it's Pride weekend. I'm sad that we are going to miss the parade. My son always comes home with a couple pounds of beads! Have a safe weekend.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

Peace and Serenity. I am so Grateful that I feel like I am at peace with so many things in my life. I have the occasional weird thoughts. But today I know they are passing thoughts that I don't seem to focus and dwell on. In the past I would ruminate about issues in my life that I couldn't control for days at a time. Today I have learned what I can control by my own hand. This keeps me peaceful and serene.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Seeing the change in me. I've really been noticing lately that I can see how my attitude about myself and about others has changed. I'm seeing that when I look at others I try not to be as judgemental as I use to be. I try to look at them and think that they have the same soul as I do on the inside, no matter what their outside may look like. Sometimes even by what my outside might look like. I'm also realizing that if I have an issue with someone I don't always think that way and I'm learning to stop myself and see I'm being judgemental.

Being sober and clean has made me a better person towards others. I don't feel so much that it's them against me. I make the effort to be as kind as I can. I'm not perfect and I still have times where I have to catch myself. But as the book says, it's progress not perfect. I apply this to everything in my life.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

So much I don't know where to begin, so I'll just make a list. For whatever reason I stopped blogging. My life has changed a bit and my blogging took a back seat. Thank goodness I never forget to be Grateful every day. But it makes my life better when I write it down.

Today I am Grateful for:

My life, my sobriety, my family and friends. I'm Grateful for my sober friends, no one gets me like they do, my new job (who knew working with my partner could be so gratifying), my photography, my blogging friends, my faith in a higher power, a roof over my head and way too much food to eat, my ability to stop and just appreciate versus looking at the negative in my life.

Life is good and I am fortunate to share it with so many people and what I learn every single day.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

My Spirituality. The last few days I have been so Grateful that I have spirituality where there once was none. My views on life are totally different today than they were almost 2 years ago. I'm not talking about being an over the top religious fanatic. I'm talking about not believing I am the center of the universe. It's about us all being connected somehow. It's about us all being one. We may not all be on the same journey at the same time but we are going in the same direction towards learning, experiencing and remembering. To me, no matter where you come from, what God you believe in, what part of the world you have grown up in we are all on the same quest.

I am so Grateful that I am sober clean from alcohol and drugs. I had no idea life could be what it is today. I am thankful that I am one of the fortunate ones to have my life before it ended too short.