Sunday, May 9, 2010

Why would a man have child outside his marriage and then not be a father?

My friend has son by her ex boyfriend. She reunited with her ex after 1year and half got pregnant (TOLD HER NOT GET AN ABORTION). Half way in her pregnancy he told her he was married. And he married a girl he met after they broke up. This is his first child which means he doesnt have a child by his wife. He finally told his wife and family. His son is 9 months and he never met his son or dont care of him.Why would a man have child outside his marriage and then not be a father?Because he's not a man. If he were a real man he would take responsibility for ALL his kids and be the best father he can be.Why would a man have child outside his marriage and then not be a father?If he told her not to get an abortion then the girl should have got some assurances from him about whether he would marry her or sign an agreement to support the child. Did they discuss this?

Anyway now she is stuck. I'm very sorry to say that whatever he felt during the relationship he seems to have changed his mind and doesn't want anything to do with her.

That's just a sad fact of life.

If he and the wife never have children (and they wanted to but couldnt) he may eventually come around and acknowledge the child but don't count on it.

Tell your friend to move on. It's over.

Unfortunately people make these decisions about getting pregnant without thinking about the long term consequences for them and for the child.

So sad. Perhaps she might think of adoption if she herself wishes that she had never had the child.Because he's a selfish bastich.

WhywhywhywhyWHY do women allow themselves to get knocked up by guys like this? This is one of the major functions of waiting for marriage to get pregnant...without that commitment, one foot in is the same as one foot out, and that's just the way it is.

That aside, what she CAN do is try to get some child support out of him, so he can pay his share for the kid he helped make.Why do you think??? This girl was an affair to him nothing more nothing less

Some easy sex and he doesn't want to disturbed his ';happy'; family he currently has

This child to him is just excess baggage from his material affair, he is scum and doesn't deserve to be in the child's life

Tell your friend to get her butt down to the court house and get this men for every dollar she can for child support because the child deserve every penny from this low lifeThat is wonderful that your friend did not get an abortion. Good for her!

If a man does not care enough about a girl to respect her and save sex for marriage, than he does not have commitment, which is necessary in a father. He should be a father, but with people like that there are no guarantees.Unfortunately this is what happens when people sleep around without being married. Maybe he only wanted your friend for sex...baby was the big ';oops';. He may have had good intentions but leave a man to mentally process things...you never know what fears it will display. He got cold feet. Unfortunately that doesn't change the fact there is a child in this world. It's not like he can put it back.

Bottom line...he needs to own up to the consequences of his irresponsibility. The baby shoudn't have to suffer because of two adults fornication without considering the fact a baby could be produced.

Tsk, tsk, tskHe never wanted a child with his mistress. Your friend should have been more diligent about her birth control. Now she's stuck with a guy that NEVER wanted to marry her and NEVER wanted to father a child with her. That's why they say - a baby a marriage does not make.The answer is in the question.

A child outside of marriage generally means he doesn't love her and certainly doesn't want to raise a child with her.

She needs to sue for child-support.HE doesn't want the emotional responsibility. And definitely doesn't want the financial responsibility either.he likes to make kids and takes no responsiblity towards his kids. why would any woman want to have kids knowing he is like this.I guess he didn't practice safe sex. Why would your friend hook up with him again to begin with? Obviously he wasn't right the first time around.He's just not serious with your friend.

So,he does not feel the sense of responsibility

towards the baby.Why? Because he is a P.O.S. Isn't it obvious?Sounds like a real jerk. Your child deserves a lot better.Because he's a shitty excuse for a man, that's why.He is a P.O. S.,,, But what the hell was up with her she should have been on birth control. No ring, No baby. Poor kid.That's pretty confusing. He just sounds like and *** to me.