Changed from MM to BA only :(

I am the mother to 2 sweet boys (6 & 4). I...

25 Mar 2012

11 days pre

I am the mother to 2 sweet boys (6 & 4). I have a wonderful, supportive husband! I just don't like my body anymore. I was in very good shape before kids...but after 2 almost 9lbs babies my stomach muscles are shot. My breast have always been small, but after beast feeding they just got smaller and are not even round anymore.

I am so nervous that I am considering cancelling my surgery. I am scheduled for a tummy tuck w/ muscle tightening and a breast augmentation (350cc) for April 6. I am so worried about the recovery time and the pain. After reading a ton of stories on here it doesn't seem like anyone has had a good recovery. The depression and pain sounds awful. I don't know what to do now. :(

So my post just came up onto this site and I...

26 Mar 2012

11 days pre

So my post just came up onto this site and I re-read it. I made a couple typos!!!! I am sure you all know what I am trying to say...but let me correct it because it bugs me!!!
So just this sentence was funny...here is the correction:
My breasts have always been small, but after breast feeding they just got smaller and are not even round anymore.
The funniest part about my original sentence was that I said, "beast feeding". Now that I think about it, maybe it was a little like that!! :)

A little more about myself...
I am 34 years old. ...

26 Mar 2012

11 days pre

A little more about myself...
I am 34 years old. I am 5'6" and 117lbs. My chest is 34 barely A. I do not smoke, drink occasionally, no drugs, work out and I eat fairly well. I do love sweets though. I eat some type of sugary goodness every day. Not excessive (in my mind!) though. My first son (6yrs) was born vaginally and my second son (4) was born via c-section. Both boys were almost 9 lbs. I was very fit before my first pregnancy and my stomach muscles didn't seem to get damaged then. After my second son was born and I had a c-section, my abs were very stretched out. When I lay down I can put 2 fingers in between the muscle near my belly button. The skin on my stomach is loose too. My boys call the skin on my stomach chicken skin...I think I may have started that one. :( When I bend over my stomach flaps over whatever I'm wearing and it's very wrinkled.

I don't know if my stomach muscles can be corrected without surgery. Are there any excercises that I can do to help make my muscle go back? My skin will always look bad without surgery.

I am seriously considering not having the tummy tuck on the 6th. Both my boys are in little league and their season just started tonight. My husband is out of town (travels a lot) so i took my oldest son to practice at 5:30. Then I took my 4yr old to his first t-ball game at 5:40. I was in the dugout the whole game because the coach didn't bother to put together a line up or anything! I put the line up together and help get each batter ready for their turn up at the plate. It was crazy but very fun! And frustrating because the coach was soooooo unprepared. Sorry...a little off topic.
Okay...so then at 7 the game was over and then I got my other son from his practice. Perfect timing. Got the boys home, fed them a little, they took a shower and off to bed. I say all of this stuff because this will be a typical Monday or Friday for me. Also, on top of practices and 1 weekday game...both boys will have one game a piece every Saturday until the 2nd week of May.
My husband will be staying home with my the first week after the surgery...he'll drive the kids to school and pick them up....do all the lunch prep and all the Mom stuff I do. He needs to go back into the office the following week (16 th). That would have me driving the boys to school one week and 2 days after my surgery. My youngest needs to be walked into his class because he is only in pre-school. What if I have any complications and my recovery isn't awesome? Then 2 weeks after my surgery my husband will be going to London for 1 week for work. That leaves me to everything...including all of the boys baseball games and practices.
Okay. I think that maybe this is really bad timing on my part for this surgery. At least the tummy tuck part. I think if I do the BA only, then I shouldn't have any problems. Am I right? Probably just poor timing. I know I will want to have a tummy tuck...maybe in the winter when the boys don't have any sports going on.
One more thing. I don't have anyone else to help me. We have 0 family here and I won't be telling them about the surgery anyway. They wouldn't understand. I say that...because it's 100% true.
I think that I should probably hold off on the tummy tuck until my boys aren't so busy and my husband will be in town for at least 3 weeks. Right?????????

I went to my pre-op yesterday and freaked out. I...

28 Mar 2012

9 days pre

I went to my pre-op yesterday and freaked out. I feel like a ridiculous person. I feel silly for wanting a MM and I feel silly for not being ready to have a MM. The feelings are so conflicting. I know that MANY women in this site have the same feelings. Guilt, uncertainty, nervous...and more guilt. I am a person who never tells anyone anything personal. I hate to admit defeat. I do everything for my boys. I have a high pain tolerance and hate to think that I can't do the TT part of the MM.
I will only be getting the BA now. I cancelled the TT. My consultant at the PS is amazing!!!!!! She was so understanding. I explained to her my situation and she looked at me said, "You're not ready and that's ok". Right now she is 2 weeks post op. She told me that the same thing happened to her. 11 years ago she got a BA but wasn't ready for the TT. She is actually recovering from a BL w/ new implants, TT w/ muscle repair and Lipo. She went back to work 7 days after her surgery. If anyone can show me how doable this is...it's her.

For now, it's a BA on 4/6. I even feel Incredibly guilty for doing just that. Why can't I just be happy with my post baby body?????

1 week from today I will be getting my BA. Still...

30 Mar 2012

7 days pre

1 week from today I will be getting my BA. Still feeling nervous. I hope 350cc silicone unders won't look to big. I don't want to be too big. I want to be able to hide it if I need to. Again, I am 34 barely A, 117lbs, 5'6". Wanting a full B small C. Eeeeek.