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Infinite Yoshi, Donkey Lady: A Day in Glitches

The last seven days have brought with them a veritable torrent of game releases, and I am sure you are buried under a pile of quality just as I am now. But even the best games, those which aren’t being rushed to make Christmas ship dates, can be released with problems.

Horse-related problems.

Super Mario Galaxy 2 has such a problem, as reported by Kotaku today — apparently if you alternate ducking and jumping just right while riding atop your stalwart steed Yoshi, you can do his height-boosting flutter jump over and over, rising higher and higher into the sky. This is probably mostly useless, although you can clearly skip some vertically-oriented Yoshi levels with this slow air-climb.

It gets worse from here.

Then, in another mount-related mishap, we have Red Dead Redemption‘s Donkey Lady, brought to our attention by Fidgit. Apparently there’s some way you can create a… oh God, I don’t know what. I’m happy the video quality is poor, since the horrified tones of the players’ voices as they describe this uncanny creature, with a horse’s mouth coming out of a woman’s face, describe the terrifying sight better than a clear picture ever could. This is the “unexplained mystery” that Alan Wake strove for.

Then they get on her and ride her into the sunset.

I don’t know how to repeat this glitch. Quite frankly, I don’t want to know, and neither should you: This is poison knowledge that Man was not meant to understand.

Nintendo won’t be able to patch away the infinite flutter jump, although I wonder if they’ll take it out of future copies of the game. Meanwhile, I’d say odds are just about even as to whether Rockstar will eradicate Donkey Lady from the game or make her an official character.