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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Dangle the Dog's show had to close The problem? Right under his nose. Since it's hard to erase the things on his face...

Now he just does puppet shows.

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Kill. Kill, kill, kill KILL! Killllllllllll....

Kill kill.

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And for our grand finale, we'd like you to know that John wrote the next one. That's right, JOHN DID IT. So it's not my or Sharyn's fault. We're just saying.

Take it away, John!

Once upon a morning dreary, while I sat there, drinking beery, Thinkin' 'bout this girl I'd ogled at the game the night before. How we went back to her trailer, thinkin' I was gonna... uh, regale her Shame she fell into the baler, just below the hayloft door. "Geez Louise!" I screamed in terror as her bits lay on the floor. "Now she's boobs... and nothing more!"

A+ for everyone, except John. He gets A++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++…(If only I had a hat with a big feather and a chalkboard. And a male voice over)

Bwah ha ha ha ha! These cakes and John's poem made me laugh out loud at work -- hard!

The bizarreness of the clowns in the country cake is legion! (And the clowns are REALLY creepy!)

Why does the scary horse have a slightly red discolored spot on its neck? It looks like it's in a sci fi movie and it has some alien disease manifesting just under its hide.

That dog cake is...there are just no adequate words. When they put the nose above the muzzle, it morphs the muzzle into dogfaceballs. Poor fellow. Reminds me of the Southpark episode when Butters had balls on his chin.

Well done, john(thoJ)...such a moving masterpiece...all I could think of after I read that sad poem was, "That poe, poe, girl."

And that horses head...just an enthusiastic fan of the Texecutioners, Austin's all-star roller derby team, currently ranked number three in the world. Their chant goes, "Texas, Texas, Kill, kill, kill."

I was, at first, puzzled by the random combination of plastic on the last clown cake. Clown heads, a horse, a couple of deer, some palm trees and a race car. But the bridge and the "Happy Birthday" message tie it all together. Uh huh.

Just wondrin' if the Kill, kill killl killlllll referenced Alice's Restaurant? Am i the only one that heard Arlo in my head while reading that? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjKF7aQthcQ&feature=kp ( sorry if i'm not allowed to add the youtube link to the song )

That "dog" cake looks like it's in the image of Jasper T. Jowls, one of the characters featured in the 1980s incarnation of Chuck E. Cheese's Pizza Time Theater. The overalls, shirt, neckerchief, and hat are the dead giveaways.

You...really don't see a lot of the old gang very much these days. A pity.

The clown cake was meant to be for Children's Day -- this just makes it exponentially worse.

I'm sure somebody posted about the whole "Children's Day" translation, but I figured I'd post too -- even though my Spanish is quite good, it took me ages to read the cake, because of the spacing & capitalization for "de los". The fact that it's for Children's Day just makes this so much better/worse.