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Libya's Moammar Khadaffi went on a two-hour televised rant Wednesday. He announced that all Libyans love him and that he will fight them all to the death. He's a bit unhinged because last weekend Arab television canceled his hit sitcom Two and a Half Personalities.

Prince William's nightclub-owner friend told reporters Wednesday he's planning to throw a wild bachelor party for the prince next month. Think about it. It must be very weird stuffing a stripper's g-string with a bill which has your grandmother's picture on it.

Attorney General Eric Holder told Congress Tuesday he won't prosecute the Black Panthers for voter intimidation in Philly, which was caught on videotape during the last presidential election. He said it demeans his people. The administration that came in promising to bring us all together will be going out as the world's biggest Civil War re-enactment.

Congress funded the government for two weeks Tuesday as they negotiate budget cuts with the White House. One congressman proposed cutting funds for the president's Teleprompter. When President Obama finds about about this, he's going to be speechless.

The Pentagon advised caution on military action in Libya Tuesday as Moammar Khadaffi began bombing and strafing rebel-held towns. The U.S. government doesn't doubt that Khadaffi has the warplanes, tanks, and helicopter gunships to win. We have the receipt.

Switzerland froze Moammar Khadaffi's many billions of dollars stashed in Swiss banks Thursday. Under Swiss banking laws, assets can only be frozen for three years. Las Vegas oddsmakers just posted the overs-and-unders on Libya's civil war at three years.

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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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