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Sunday, September 23, 2018

my laptop can't start, here's a late update.

September 19th:

Life has been a lot of sunshine and songs,

Pizza and good company,

Learning to co-write, and learning to cook.

Everyone here has taught me so many things than I know how to thank them for. I’m learning how to be braver, and to be more comfortable with myself. That was something I didn’t know was possible. Maybe comes with growing up and accepting. Accepting that there are things can’t all be planned out, and accepting that everything changes all the time. Embracing uncertainty. Life is so much more than the little bubble we put ourselves in, and there this wide open space of possibility that is both incredibly terrifying and exciting.

There’s an ice skating rink 15 minute walk from where I stay and that makes me so incredibly happy even though I can’t afford to go there every day. I had a giant brownie the size of my palm the other day. It took me awhile to finish, so I packed it back. My sugar tolerance has increased tremendously since being here but alcohol still tastes bad to me.

I came here to find myself as much as I came to learn about music.

I’m halfway into this adventure and I feel like I’ve been more of myself than I’ve ever been. As much as I love it here, There are moments when I miss home with an ache that I can’t describe. It’s not a hurting ache, more like a hole right through the middle of me. Emptiness and space. Maybe it’s not really the place that I miss, it’s the people, and the familiarity of home that I miss. I don’t know. But I do know that when I leave Nashville I’m going to want to come back.