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Thyme For Literary Healing: Losing Faith In Ourselves

This is a topic near and dear to my heart because I think we lose faith in ourselves as a result of the side effects and symptoms of our disease. I want us to break it down and go there, bring the elephant out from under the rug and share our collective brutal truths. Our bodies and minds have betrayed us.

Reader Feedback

I have lost faith in my ablity to get my point across and have given up even trying anymore is it my disease of my faith in th emeidcal profession catch 22.
2.Have you lost faith in your mind and body or mind, or body?

Both.
3.What have you done to restore faith in yourself?

Given up even trying and just go with the flow.
4.What has been the most challenging aspects of your disease?

getting some fucking doctor to undertand the signs and symptoms and just not the lab results. If they did it would be more manageable.
5.How are you working to find your way back to yourself?

I am not trying at the moment I will get my mojo back until then I am not going to worry myself about anything who needs the stress of it all.

I haven’t lost faith in myself, and I feel lucky in that. I know my abilities, and most aren’t hampered by this disease. So far.

2. Have you lost faith in your mind and body or mind, or body?

Definitely I have lost faith in my body. I thought that mind/body were a team. We worked together and I tried my best to take care of myself. Then this, Graves Disease. I could walk, talk, think, sleep, work, eat and drink. Now I have had to change every singe one of those things to adapt. Losing control makes me feel like I am losing a bit of who I am.

3. What have you done to restore faith in yourself?

Adjusting to this, these things. It is what I do, I work hard and learn, and adapt as required.

4. What has been the most challenging aspects of your disease?

The most challenging aspect will be for me to talk to people about it. I haven’t talked much about it, except for with people I trust. My immediate family [hubby, 2 kids], one of my sisters, and one co-worker. I just have a hard time trying to blurt out “I have Graves Disease”. Everyone has “stuff” they have to deal with, so why should I bother everyone with adding to this. I don’t need anything from them. If I tell my parents [both in mid 80’s] they will worry. I don’t need for them to worry. I am dealing with it. Arrrrgh. Ok this really is challenging me.

5. How are you working to find your way back to yourself?

I may never be the “me” I thought I was before this happened. But then, I am not the same person I was a year ago, or yesterday. We all change and reinvent, so I am really trying not to dwell on going back to myself. I am right here, right now. This is how I am, and will be until the next change. Being ok with that is making every day pretty damn good.