I am an African-American man. I am VERY offended by this article, more specifically, the pictures. Not hard to figure out, I depise seeing anything showing a white woman with a black man, and especially the offspring. That's because it only spurrs even more hatred. Have you ever noticed that while you see light-skinned black children on pictures of products all the time (let's face it, they're often more physically attractive), you RARELY see the mother. In fact, there was one where a beautiful light-skinned little black girl was sitting on the lap of a DARK-skinned black mother (if that was indeed her mother). Why is that ok? Because nobody is against it. It doesn't matter whether my friends are white, black, Mexican, Arab, or Chinese. I asked them over the years, what honestly do they stereotype about black men who have kids with non-black women, and they agree that it is the most hated.Will black men ever stop having children with non-black women? Of course not. But, this is something that needs to be KEPT QUIET and not put the spotlight on. I know that picture offends many black women.Furthermore, mention of her film school boyfriend who was gone when the son was born just once again feeds the stereotype of black men: Get the white woman pregnant, and disappear from her and the child's life, and contribute nothing.And, the skin color of either Randy Anderson or the father of her child has NO bearing on the story. So, you should have just shown a picture of the son. Leave it to the readers to guess what race either parent was, but picturing the mother just takes EVERYBODY'S concentration off the issue at hand (single mothering), and you KNOW that readers are half thinking about "black man/white woman/illegitimate child."If this were an artical SPECIFICALLY about biracial children, then fine, show the pictures. You may THINK that showing just how much these exist breeds more acceptance, but all it does is breed more hate. Believe me, I know. One such example is whenever a black man has a job interview, he's asked to bring a picture of his family. Why? It's obvious. If his wife is white or Mexican or Arab or Chinese, he gets rejected for the job.If I sound angry, it's because I am. PLEASE DO NOT (or at least minimize) showing pictures of children of black fathers and non-black mothers. I know that you mean well, but this was very hurtful for me, as well as many black men to see. It reinforces ALL stereotypes that society has about black-American men.David Walker

I am an African-American man. I am VERY offended by this article, more specifically, the pictures. Not hard to figure out, I depise seeing anything showing a white woman with a black man, and especially the offspring. That's because it only spurrs even more hatred. Have you ever noticed that while you see light-skinned black children on pictures of products all the time (let's face it, they're often more physically attractive), you RARELY see the mother. In fact, there was one where a beautiful light-skinned little black girl was sitting on the lap of a DARK-skinned black mother (if that was indeed her mother). Why is that ok? Because nobody is against it. It doesn't matter whether my friends are white, black, Mexican, Arab, or Chinese. I asked them over the years, what honestly do they stereotype about black men who have kids with non-black women, and they agree that it is the most hated.

Will black men ever stop having children with non-black women? Of course not. But, this is something that needs to be KEPT QUIET and not put the spotlight on. I know that picture offends many black women.

Furthermore, mention of her film school boyfriend who was gone when the son was born just once again feeds the stereotype of black men: Get the white woman pregnant, and disappear from her and the child's life, and contribute nothing.

And, the skin color of either Randy Anderson or the father of her child has NO bearing on the story. So, you should have just shown a picture of the son. Leave it to the readers to guess what race either parent was, but picturing the mother just takes EVERYBODY'S concentration off the issue at hand (single mothering), and you KNOW that readers are half thinking about "black man/white woman/illegitimate child."

If this were an artical SPECIFICALLY about biracial children, then fine, show the pictures. You may THINK that showing just how much these exist breeds more acceptance, but all it does is breed more hate. Believe me, I know. One such example is whenever a black man has a job interview, he's asked to bring a picture of his family. Why? It's obvious. If his wife is white or Mexican or Arab or Chinese, he gets rejected for the job.

If I sound angry, it's because I am. PLEASE DO NOT (or at least minimize) showing pictures of children of black fathers and non-black mothers. I know that you mean well, but this was very hurtful for me, as well as many black men to see. It reinforces ALL stereotypes that society has about black-American men.

Dear David,I respectfully disagree. I understand your concern, and would not want to perpetuate a stereotype of the African-American man. After all, I am raising a son who is 25% African American.

That being said, this is not a race issue. Of course, I am Caucasian and my son is Multi-ethnic and therefore some people may make it a race issue.(You are the only I have heard of- but I am sure you do not stand alone.)

My group is about mothers, single mothers, being the best parents we can be while also succeeding in life. I am proud of who I am, and I am forever proud of my amazingly sweet, smart, and handsome son. I am not going to hide, or hide my son because some people do not like us only because of our skin color. I hope to also raise a son who is proud of who he is no matter the prejudges of others.

If you really looked at the article, I am not the "stereo-typical" woman you speak of. I think my story challenges many of ideas you are speaking about. I am a good mother who is constantly trying to be a better mother, woman, and citizen.

I hope you can see past our color.Best to you,Randi

David Walker wrote:

I am an African-American man. I am VERY offended by this article, more specifically, the pictures. Not hard to figure out, I depise seeing anything showing a white woman with a black man, and especially the offspring. That's because it only spurrs even more hatred. Have you ever noticed that while you see light-skinned black children on pictures of products all the time (let's face it, they're often more physically attractive), you RARELY see the mother. In fact, there was one where a beautiful light-skinned little black girl was sitting on the lap of a DARK-skinned black mother (if that was indeed her mother). Why is that ok? Because nobody is against it. It doesn't matter whether my friends are white, black, Mexican, Arab, or Chinese. I asked them over the years, what honestly do they stereotype about black men who have kids with non-black women, and they agree that it is the most hated.Will black men ever stop having children with non-black women? Of course not. But, this is something that needs to be KEPT QUIET and not put the spotlight on. I know that picture offends many black women.Furthermore, mention of her film school boyfriend who was gone when the son was born just once again feeds the stereotype of black men: Get the white woman pregnant, and disappear from her and the child's life, and contribute nothing.And, the skin color of either Randy Anderson or the father of her child has NO bearing on the story. So, you should have just shown a picture of the son. Leave it to the readers to guess what race either parent was, but picturing the mother just takes EVERYBODY'S concentration off the issue at hand (single mothering), and you KNOW that readers are half thinking about "black man/white woman/illegitimate child."If this were an artical SPECIFICALLY about biracial children, then fine, show the pictures. You may THINK that showing just how much these exist breeds more acceptance, but all it does is breed more hate. Believe me, I know. One such example is whenever a black man has a job interview, he's asked to bring a picture of his family. Why? It's obvious. If his wife is white or Mexican or Arab or Chinese, he gets rejected for the job.If I sound angry, it's because I am. PLEASE DO NOT (or at least minimize) showing pictures of children of black fathers and non-black mothers. I know that you mean well, but this was very hurtful for me, as well as many black men to see. It reinforces ALL stereotypes that society has about black-American men.David Walker

Randy, sorry that I blew off at you. I read your web page and became even more hurt.I'm going to share some harsh truths to you, and we can respectfully disagree. Correct, I don't stand alone, as I know black women who find seeing this as a slap in their face.One thing is that if you had a daughter, she'd likely marry a white man. The stereotype is that the black man gets the white woman pregnant, leaves, and the woman marries a white man (avoiding black men, because she now no longer finds black men to her taste because of behavior). The daughter also marries a white man, because seeing how her birth father treated her mother, "black men are unreliable, and thus better avoided."

I respect that you're not going to "hide" behind your identity, but because this involves a man leaving town just before the baby is born, it was best not to give people the ammo they're surely firing when they see yet another black man doing this. If you were black or your boyfriend was white, you wouldn't have gotten nearly the reaction.

You don't look like a typical stereotypical non-black woman who gets impregnated by black men, and you may not be aware of some harsh things, which I'll share with you, because I want to help you.One, you should have known that black men (yes, my own) have a habit of "ditching." There are good black men out there, but you evidently didn't choose one.I see that dating isn't at the top of your list of wants, but let me clue you in. If you're a non-black woman, and have a kid with a black man, especially a boy, you're in trouble. Nobody wants you. Think I don't have men in my family who I've seen go thru rejection too? You haven't dated for three years, and it's likely that you won't date for three more. Even if you meet a good white man or Arab or Mexican or Chinese or Indian man, his family is going to shut him out if he dates you. I don't like that, but you can't say that I didn't tell you so.

I think you're a nice woman who means well, and maybe you haven't lived the hard stuff up until recently. I can't fail to see that nobody has helped you with your son. If your parents live far away, all right. If they're both dead, god rest their souls. But, I personally think that your family has turned their back on you. I've seen it too many times in this situation.

I'll finish this by saying that you and your son are "marked," not only by whites but blacks as well. I just want you to be aware.

Randy, you are a good woman and are trying. Nice woman but just naive, and it isn't your fault. I don't go for a day without remembering that I'm African-American, and neither will your son. It's life.Just know that some time you'll go to a hotel with your son, and get rejected for a room. If I as a black man come alone, or with my brother, we get the room. If I come with a non-black woman, I'm subject to be rejected for a room, "sorry no vacancy."Randy, I know that you didn't mean for this to be a race issue. That's what HURTS me, really, because I just want you to know that it's not safe to be so matter of fact about your son's race, witch is still the most despised in this country. I hope that you now at least know what unpleasant things may lie ahead of you, like the hotel room rejection situation.

I'm out.David Walker (still hurt and still offended but understanding of Randy)

I think their is a problem with men in general, how dare you Mr. Walker bring the spread of racism into a completely different issue, your just as bad as everyone else, who is racist, why would you automatically focus on the picture or the color of the mother and child, you need to look past that, and just look at the situation, their are a lot of issues with people making the wrong choices of who to chose as a life partner or father for their children thus the high divorce rate and immature men who just walk out on their children and families, but the point is that this happens to people everyday everywhere whether they are black or white, yellow, red ,brown! You shouldn't be so selfish as to take offenses to a interracial family they are beautiful and created in gods likeness in image. Real Change and acceptance in society starts with individuals who start looking at people as people, created by God, not stereotyping them by the color of their skin.

only a true racist would find cause to be offended. anybody else would not have noticed it... i am black and english born and find that their is a growing trend being adopted from the u.s that i do not understand! "i am a black man this...i am a black man that"well, i say: "i am a man, i also try to be a good man" it troubles me that our young lads have grown these chips on their shoulders and i wish they would just get on with their lives isntead of the "im so hard done by" attitued.

I have read David's posts and your posts also Randy and to be honest with you, David is right. You are certainly not the stereotype of the white woman who gets pregnant by black man, however this an issue that is alarming a great deal of white families in America, and as usual the reaction will only get stronger as the number of white women impregnated by blacks increase. I have seen what happened to those unfortunate single white mothers who after being naive to trust irresponsible men, are now facing the double hate of society and family. DAVID IS NOT A RACIST, HE IS A REALIST, who was brave enough to tell you the truth even if that truth is abhored, detested by political correct people like you. I hope you and the other single mothers you know, instruct and help many young girls no matter their race, who are likely to fall in the traps you and your friends have fallen, and by this, prevent more suffering to those future disgraced women and their future rejected children, who after all, will end up suffering the most. I hope you have understood my point, and help the poor inexperienced girls to avoid the pain you and your friends are experiencing now.

Randi wrote:

Dear David,I respectfully disagree. I understand your concern, and would not want to perpetuate a stereotype of the African-American man. After all, I am raising a son who is 25% African American.That being said, this is not a race issue. Of course, I am Caucasian and my son is Multi-ethnic and therefore some people may make it a race issue.(You are the only I have heard of- but I am sure you do not stand alone.)My group is about mothers, single mothers, being the best parents we can be while also succeeding in life. I am proud of who I am, and I am forever proud of my amazingly sweet, smart, and handsome son. I am not going to hide, or hide my son because some people do not like us only because of our skin color. I hope to also raise a son who is proud of who he is no matter the prejudges of others.If you really looked at the article, I am not the "stereo-typical" woman you speak of. I think my story challenges many of ideas you are speaking about. I am a good mother who is constantly trying to be a better mother, woman, and citizen.I hope you can see past our color.Best to you,Randi<quoted text>

David, in my opinion you are right, unfortunately many people are blind by political correctness, the greatest social cancer created so far that only adds to ignorance and alienation. If there were more honest people who had the habit of thinking clearly without prejudice, there wouldn't be so much suffering in society. Unfortunately, whenever people don't like the truth, they create one to satisfy themselves and fit their political correct views. You are one of the most candid men I ever heard of, don't bother with the insults you may face for exposing your views, they are right, and even the most political correct militants of this country know this. I hope you keep saying the truth and help the most vulnerable alienated young girls to get rid of the political correct cancer and avoid disgracing themselves by getting pregnantby irresponsible men.

David Walker wrote:

Randy, you are a good woman and are trying. Nice woman but just naive, and it isn't your fault. I don't go for a day without remembering that I'm African-American, and neither will your son. It's life.Just know that some time you'll go to a hotel with your son, and get rejected for a room. If I as a black man come alone, or with my brother, we get the room. If I come with a non-black woman, I'm subject to be rejected for a room, "sorry no vacancy."Randy, I know that you didn't mean for this to be a race issue. That's what HURTS me, really, because I just want you to know that it's not safe to be so matter of fact about your son's race, witch is still the most despised in this country. I hope that you now at least know what unpleasant things may lie ahead of you, like the hotel room rejection situation.I'm out.David Walker (still hurt and still offended but understanding of Randy)

Well, I still disagree. My son and I have faced no issues. We have stayed at several hotels without problem (Westin, Red Lion, Hilton...). My family is very supportive, but do live out of state. I am not young (34), nor naive. I am educated and a good mother.

Many of the mothers in our program have been married for several years and have divorced. We come from all different backgrounds. Many are well into their 40s or 50s.

My son and I do not experience the things you speak of. What alarms me most is that all of these assumptions are made without thought. Therein lies the stigma of what a single mother is. This is what is truly sad.

This is 2006. I know that there are many places that are not that forward and I know that there are many people who have not caught up with the times. I choose not to be in those areas or surround myself with those people. My son is very LOVED, and welcomed everywhere that I have been.

If you are not experiencing hardships in your life after becoming a single mother, you may consider yourself extremely lucky. Although many women think they can create artificial truths to suit their political correct views, to impose their views on the whole society, the facts speak for themselves and tell a VERY SAD, not to mention a DISASTROUS story. Read this article at

Well, I still disagree. My son and I have faced no issues. We have stayed at several hotels without problem (Westin, Red Lion, Hilton...). My family is very supportive, but do live out of state. I am not young (34), nor naive. I am educated and a good mother.Many of the mothers in our program have been married for several years and have divorced. We come from all different backgrounds. Many are well into their 40s or 50s.My son and I do not experience the things you speak of. What alarms me most is that all of these assumptions are made without thought. Therein lies the stigma of what a single mother is. This is what is truly sad.This is 2006. I know that there are many places that are not that forward and I know that there are many people who have not caught up with the times. I choose not to be in those areas or surround myself with those people. My son is very LOVED, and welcomed everywhere that I have been.Your concerns do not apply to me or my son.Please, move on.RandI

Oh my goodness. First, that is not even the debate in this forum.Next, I suppose that the fact that this appears to be a 10 year old study of data dated up to 1995 has been missed by you.It seems that you believe that my sole purpose in life should be to get married. This seems rediculous to me. I am an educated woman with very little issues in finding dates (choosing to share my valued time with someone is another issue). Sadly, it is likely that people like you are sending messages to single mothers that they are not worthy of doing better. Had I aborted or married the father of my child (after becoming pregnant), then these would not be issues right?? Isn't the divorce rate over 50% these days? It seems to me that there are far more single mothers and fathers, and blended families these days.

I am a single mother and I don't buy into this study as, again, it does not apply to me. I wonder why it seems that you need this information? Perhaps just to attack single mothers? Is attacking people helping anything? Is attacking women making life better for the children? Shouldn't we as a society concern ourselves with the future, and how we can make it better for those already here?Finally, this is MY life, and YOUR issues do not apply to ME.Best,Randi

Thinker wrote:

If you are not experiencing hardships in your life after becoming a single mother, you may consider yourself extremely lucky. Although many women think they can create artificial truths to suit their political correct views, to impose their views on the whole society, the facts speak for themselves and tell a VERY SAD, not to mention a DISASTROUS story. Read this article athttp://researchnews.osu.edu/archive/marrpros....After reading this, tell me what you think.<quoted text>

I am not attacking single mothers, but just emphasizing that traditional families create economic prosperity, better educated individuals, and above all, promote stable societies. Since you are an educated woman, it would be more adivisable for you to counsel young women to better choose their men in order to create a more healthy, stable and responsible society. Families led by single mothers tend to be poorer, unstable, and in most cases dependent on the tax payer money to survive. You may be luck enough, because you came probably from a stable, well-off family, which has provided you a costly education, but the vast majority of single mothers are from poor, unstable families, quite different from the one you came from. Single parent families lead to population decline(less than 2.1 children per woman, which is the replacement level) and decreased living standards. It is not by chance Western Europe is becoming increasingly decadent and losing influence in the world. If you stop thinking only on yourself, and a little bit more on your female friends who happen to be not so fortunate as you, you will see how much they are suffering, the disgrace that is the MATRIARCHY, so ardently defended by feminists and political correct activists. I have already witnessed the horrors that those unfortunate and alienated women experience on a regular basis, how they easily become drug addicts, how their children fail miserably at school and so on, poor women who are not as fortunate as you. You may feel happy in your decision to prop up the MATRIARCHY, to prop up political correctness, but in reality, such ideology will lead to the downfall of many poor women and their future disgraced children, who will end up being the innocent victims of these blatantly distorted views, which feminists pompously call "MODERN FAMILY VALUES". Please, think well on these words, they are not intended to hurt you, but to offer you a concise, balanced, undistorted view of the modern world. I hope you will understand my point. Sincerely Thinker

You don't know me or anything about my background and the assumptions just keep on flying.

Perhaps you need to go back and read the article to begin with. We are already single mothers doing our best to be positive parents, and working towards personal success. Our children are not failing. And, the point of my organization is to EMPOWER us to be our best! How can anyone argue with this? It's amazing to me how people would want others to fail.

And, yet, we are the one's who did take responsibility for our actions. Go figure that stones would still be thrown in this day and age. Where are the men here? Right, it is just women, we are bringing down all of society single handedly? Wow.

Are you aware of the caos the MATRIARCHY has brought to Western Europe? Do you have any idea about how old, decadent, violent, and the socially desintegrated Western Europe has become? It is not by chance, most europeamn countries have resorted to immigration from the poorest and the most underdeveloped countries in the world to fill their strong population decline, a decision which will only bring more violence, caos and social desintegration, as those immigrants have proved unable to be assimilated into european societies. Thanks to the MATRIARCHY, so pompously propped up by feminists, Europe is declining faster, losing its identity, and rotting in decadence, alienation, drug addiction, prostitution and family breakdown. The final result of all of this is that women become irresponsible, idiotic, decadent and start picking the worst type of men to father their children, leading to social and genetic breakdown of families, since most of these men chosen by these women are defficient in character, and in most cases biologically due to disgraced habbits of heavy drug addiction and alcohol abuse. I have already seen what is happening to the children born of such men and women, and the pain they are experiencing , lots of them are even HIV positive transmitted from their mothers acquired in sexual relations they had with their fathers which are no more than losers. You may not be of these disgraced women, but you defense of the MATRIARCHY will only leed to the spread of caos and family desintegration, and the poor children born of this disgraced process will pay suffering the horrors of such disgraced human experience. Sincerely Thinker

Randi wrote:

You don't know me or anything about my background and the assumptions just keep on flying.Perhaps you need to go back and read the article to begin with. We are already single mothers doing our best to be positive parents, and working towards personal success. Our children are not failing. And, the point of my organization is to EMPOWER us to be our best! How can anyone argue with this? It's amazing to me how people would want others to fail.And, yet, we are the one's who did take responsibility for our actions. Go figure that stones would still be thrown in this day and age. Where are the men here? Right, it is just women, we are bringing down all of society single handedly? Wow.

Are you aware of the chaos the MATRIARCHY has brought to Western Europe? Do you have any idea about how old, decadent, violent, and socially desintegrated Western Europe has become? It is not by chance, most europeamn countries have resorted to immigration from the poorest and the most underdeveloped countries of the third world to compensate their strong population decline, a decision which will only bring more violence, chaos and social desintegration, since those immigrants have proved unable to be assimilated into european societies. Thanks to the MATRIARCHY, so pompously propped up by feminists, Europe is declining faster, losing its identity, and rotting in decadence, alienation, drug addiction, prostitution and family breakdown; the same process is repeating itself in the other major industrilized countries. The final result of this process is that women become irresponsible, idiotic, decadent and start picking the worst type of men to father their children, leading to social and genetic breakdown of a sizable part of the population, since most of these men, chosen by these alienated women, are not only defficient in character but in most cases biologically as well, because in its vast majority they are heavy drug addicts and alcohol abusers, which tend to deform their biological structure, which in turn lead them to spread desease when they have sexual intercourse with alienated women. I have already seen what is happening to the children born of such men and women, and the pain they are experiencing , lots of them are even HIV positive, acquired from their mothers which acquired from their men, when they had sexual intercourse. You may not be one of these disgraced women, but your defense of the MATRIARCHY will only lead to the spread of chaos, poverty and social desintegration, and the poor children, born of this disgraced process, will pay the most tragic price, suffering the horrors of such disgraced social experience that is political correctness, an experience that is making losers, fathers of a sizable part of humanity. I am very sorry for being candid with you, as a matter of fact I am NOT YOUR ENEMY, I admire your strength, honesty and love for your child, and I hope you will come to your senses and start fighting this scourge called political correctness and the most vile cancer it generates: THE MATRIARCHY. Sincerely Thinker

Randi wrote:

You don't know me or anything about my background and the assumptions just keep on flying.Perhaps you need to go back and read the article to begin with. We are already single mothers doing our best to be positive parents, and working towards personal success. Our children are not failing. And, the point of my organization is to EMPOWER us to be our best! How can anyone argue with this? It's amazing to me how people would want others to fail.And, yet, we are the one's who did take responsibility for our actions. Go figure that stones would still be thrown in this day and age. Where are the men here? Right, it is just women, we are bringing down all of society single handedly? Wow.

I should not have got sucked into this conversation. Clearly you have issues that do NOT have ANYTHING to do with me!!

I am a single mom, executive director, and graduate student. I do not have time to defend the fact that I have taken full responsibility for my life, and most of the single mothers I know (300+) do not fit your ideas.

Clearly you are not doing much about the state of the world- it seems that you prefer to attack rather than to try to be a better person. I do not have time for this. I actually am busy doing something to benefit the world.Best of Luck,Randi

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