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Thursday, February 28, 2013

Getting Back on Track With My Goals

This year is supposed to be a great one. I felt it all last month, but February’s been kind of depressing. It usually is for me though. It’s grey, cold, wet and snowy. My birthday is in February, too, which always depresses me. It has something with getting older, but not so much age wise, just the fact that I thought I would have accomplished so much more by now.

I figure since there is only one more day left of this dreary month it’s time to get back on track with my goals and priorities.

Something that I am very passionate about is moving towards a more simple, healthier and eco-friendly lifestyle.

Minimizing My Wardrobe

I’m planning on getting rid of more than half of my clothes. Seriously! As of right now my clothes are either too small, stained or ripped or simply no longer my style. I wear the same clothes over and over again. Time to clear out the rest and make room in my drawers. Besides, I hate doing laundry. Less clothes = less laundry.

Stained and ripped clothes will be cut up and saved for rags.

Too small and no-longer-me clothes will be neatly put away for my spring yard sale.

Concert t-shirts will be stored away and perhaps I will make them into a quilt or piece of art. They have sentimental value, which is weird I know but I love them anyway.

Now I’m left with:

3 jeans

1 dress pants

2 track pants

1 PJ set

2 black tank tops

3 t-shirts

3 sweaters (I’m always cold so I need more than one!)

3 long sleeved shirts

And 1 ugly t-shirt and track pants for painting, dying are, and just getting dirty in general.

And that’s it! Other than a bathing suite, socks and undergarments. I might have to add to my wardrobe if I get a job that has a specific dress code.

How to decide what to get rid of:

Obviously if it’s ripped or stained, throw it out! You deserve better than that.

If it doesn’t fit any more, and hasn’t for a while, it might be time to say goodbye.

If it’s because it’s too small and you plan to lose weight, how about you get rid of it now and when you do lose weight reward yourself with new clothes! However, if that dress or pants is your motivation clothes I guess keeping one is okay.

If it’s because you lost weight, what the heck are you doing keeping clothes that are now too big?

If you haven’t worn it in a year you probably won’t ever wear it again. I say a year because by then every season has gone by and you still haven’t worn it.

If you have something you wear but feel uncomfortable and annoyed every time you wear it, seriously just get rid of it. I have this really annoying pair of jeans I kept torturing myself with and now they are gone and it feels so good.

If you’re like me and have sentimental clothes you can’t stand to part with, do yourself a favour and store it away, or take a picture of it for good memories and get rid of it.

If you don’t love it, and only wear it once in a while because you have nothing else to wear, get rid of it! This is pretty much half my wardrobe alone.

You will feel so much better once you’re done. You did something productive, you either donated your clothes to less fortunate or made money in the process, and by cleaning out your closet you have uncluttered your mind and can be at peace. Or at least now you have room for newer, better clothes. However, I’m trying to live a more minimalist lifestyle so this doesn’t apply to me.

As Humans, We Judge.

People are always so quick to judge. We judge other people on how they dress, what they eat, their parenting style, their jobs and income, hobbies and likes. It’s a never ending list of things to judge someone on. I’m just as guilty of this as anybody else.

But then…

I had a very wise teacher while I attended an adult learning center to complete my high school credits and graduate. He told my classmates and I that it wasn’t fair to judge people on our beliefs and values, but to judge them on their own. At first I was a little confused by this and while I don’t completely agree with this statement 100%, I finally understand what he meant.

For Example.

If I were living in another country, the laws and beliefs there would be different. I wouldn’t be allowed to go there and follow the laws and beliefs that we have here in Canada without some consequences because they simply do things differently over there. Another Example.

I’m a one-man kind of girl. And my hubby, Nick, is a one-woman kind of guy. So that works out well for us, but if another couple decides to have an open relationship and the two of them are completely okay with that, as well as the other people they see, who am I to judge them?

However, it would be wrong for one person in the relationship to believe they are allowed to see other people, but their significant other is not allowed. That’s what is known as hypocrisy.

Am I making myself understood or am I just babbling now? Anyway… Back to my main point.

As Parents, We Judge

There are a million different ways to raise a child, and 999, 999 of them are all correct.

I believe that being a parent is the most difficult job there is and it’s also very scary. Make one wrong mistake, and you feel like the biggest failure of all time. We all want what is best for our children; for them to be healthy, happy and successful (whatever that means), and our children are heavily dependent on us parents to provide them with the skills and knowledge to achieve those things.

I think any parent would agree with me when I say that there isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t question my parenting ability and second guess every decision I make.

It’s even more difficult when there are a thousand different resources with a thousand different opinions on parenting. To make matters worse, we have every other mom out there watching our every move, ready to pounce on all of our choices and criticize our decisions. Instead of supporting and helping one another, it feels like other mom’s are all out to get one another. Does anyone else ever feel this way?

So from my own experience I have come up with a short list of the things I feel parents judge other parents on the most.

Top 4 Things Parents Judge Other Parents On:

Eating Habits

This starts right from infancy. There’s the whole breastfeeding over formula arguments, and even though it has been proven time and time again that breast milk is healthiest it’s not always the right decision or even an option. For example, my older sister was not able to produce breast milk for some strange reason, so she had no choice.

Then it starts up again with when to introduce solids, and you know that whole, “only introduce one new food a week” topic that I seemed to forget to do… There’s the whole, “OMG you let your one year old drink apple juice?!” topic, and when is it okay to allow your child to start eating “junk” food?

It only gets more complicated as they get older, too. I really don’t know why other parent’s are so concerned with what other people are feeding their children. How about we give advice to one another on what foods we like to feed our kids, with some tips and tricks we know, but in the end butt out and worry about your own family? Sounds like a deal to me.

Activities

This can range from things like sports, dance classes and other after school activities, but it also includes how we choose to let our children spend their spare time.

Some parents might think I let my daughter watch too much television, but then there are parents who have the TV on all the time.

I don’t like the cold, or winter, so we don’t play outside very much in the winter and some people might think that that’s awful. In the summer we’re outside all day though; swimming, playing, going to the park or the beach.

Bedtime Rituals

Some people think it’s wrong to have children co-sleep with their parents after a certain age, while others are fine with it up to age 6. Personally, once my daughter turned 6 months old I put her in her own bedroom and forced her to fall asleep by herself. My mom thought I was mean because I was okay with letting her cry herself to sleep. Of course I checked on her regularly! First every five minutes, then ten, then twenty… Eventually she was able to fall asleep right away on her own.

It’s not your responsibility to decide what is right for other families. My daughter’s bedtime is 8:30p.m. because she functions well off of 11-12 hours of sleep. My niece’s bedtime is 7:30p.m. because her school starts earlier. Maybe your child only needs 7 hours of sleep, or maybe they need 14 - you know what’s best for your child so don’t worry about what other people say.

Discipline

I think this is a big one. Disciplining a child is tricky, I know! My daughter has tantrums quite often, and most of the time I just don’t know how to deal with them. I actually have to try and cut sugar out of her diet because she goes nuts and starts misbehaving immediately after she’s had a couple pieces of candy.

I try to do the whole time-out thing, but she won’t sit still and just screams non-stop. I can’t tame her with love, you know, hugging her tight and trying to calm her down because she goes even crazier. Most of the time the only thing that works is to bring her into a quiet room where there is nobody else, turn on a cartoon and just have her veg out for 10 - 15 minutes.

Every child is different. Every family is different. Therefore every body’s rules and upbringings will be different. We can give advice on what works for us and our family and children, but we can’t expect it to be the only right way to do things. It’s not fair to judge other parents. Variety and diversity is what makes the world go round, and it’s what makes life so amazing. Plus, it never hurts to keep an open-mind and try new things.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Remember how I was planning on waking up a half an hour earlier?

Well that hasn't worked out at all!

It seems as if my mind, and my alarm clock are against me.

First of all, my mind is going 100 mph lately, to the point where I can't fall asleep until 4a.m. most nights. I'd love to just shut if off at midnight and fall asleep, but I can't. Even when I'm super tired! I keep thinking about college, money, my blog and Etsy shops, moving into an apartment and everything and anything else that's going on right now.

On top of that, I've been sick for the past two weeks. It's just a pesky cold, but the mucus, coughing and fatigue along with it are so annoying. It's really hard to sleep when you're annoyed with your runny nose and coughing a lot.

And of course my alarm clock has been acting up. When I set it the night before, it works. But then in the mornings, the volume is so low you can barely here it and it doesn't wake me up. Luckily my mind is trained to wake up at 8:30a.m. so Sidney is never late for school, but that doesn't help me get up earlier.

I'm going to try some different techniques to help me fall asleep faster, and I might just have to invest in a new alarm clock. I don't want to, because I hate spending money, but I will if I can't get this damn thing to work.

Monday, February 25, 2013

Buying vintage items may be second-nature to a lot of people, such as myself. I grew up with hand-me-down clothes and frequent visits to the thrift store. At the time my friends thought used clothing and other items meant you were too poor to afford new things, but that's not at all true.

There are many reasons why people like to buy vintage items.

Vintage items can be unique, inexpensive, great quality and comes with it's own history. Not to mention that vintage shopping is eco-friendly and a lot of fun!

So here is my list, in no particular order.

5 Benefits of Buying Vintage

1. Unique

If you have ever taken the time to walk through a thrift store, attend an estate auction sale or even browse online vintage shops, you already know that vintage items have a uniqueness to them.Unlike today’s mass produced items that everyone else is buying, it’s not likely you will run into someone who owns the exact same vintage piece you have. We’re talking about decades of clothes, furniture, home décor items and housewares to go through. Back in the day, items were produced in smaller quantities than they are now. Not to mention, that amazing dress or teapot you find might be the only surviving one of it's kind. Unique items also go well with a ton of different fashion styles and home decorating styles.

2. Quality

In our mass produced society, clothes and other items are typically made in third world countries in the fastest and cheapest way possible. Doesn't it just suck when you’re out wearing your brand new shirt, just to have the seams start to fray? Vintage clothes have been around for decades, and are still in good shape because they were made with better quality materials, and produced in better conditions. Same goes for housewares and home décor items.

3. Environment

A ton of stuff is thrown out and ends up in landfills polluting our planet Earth. By purchasing a vintage item you’re helping the environment by keeping it out of the trash. Essentially, you are reusing or recycling those items and giving them new life when they would otherwise have been thrown out.The manufacturing of clothing, furniture and other household items has a huge impact on the environment. The more new stuff that is bought, the more they have to produce and the more toxins, dyes and water is used and pollution is created.Little Shop of Treasures also uses recycled materials for shipping to help reduce our carbon footprint even more. All of our boxes and packaging paper is from recycled materials (so don’t be surprised if your item shows up in an Eggo box!). We like to reuse packaging peanuts when we can, too, either by scoring some at our local thrift shop of getting them from another business who would have otherwise thrown it out. Of course, making sure your item is properly and safely packaged is our top priority.

4. History

There’s a bit of history to every vintage piece you own. These items had a past life before entering yours. A beloved dress worn on a girl’s first date, a favourite teddy bear, Grandma’s much-loved soup pot. It’s kind of fun to think of the events and experiences your “new” vintage item has gone through. Chances are, almost everything you find will have it's own story.

5. Inexpensive

If you walk into a brand new store you’re most likely to find a vase for anywhere between $30 to hundreds of dollars. However, if you browse Etsy’s vintage section you can find the most stunning and rare vases for much lower prices. And not just on Etsy, at any store/website that sells vintage.Yes, some vintage items are more expensive than brand new but that’s factoring in the quality, the brand name, the condition it’s in and how sought after it is. For example, Pyrex kitchenware can be expensive. Especially their mixing bowl sets (sometimes up to $100 or more), but that’s because of how desired they are for their well-known name and high quality. Which could be another good point, some vintage items are a good investment and increase in value.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Today Young Mommy Memoirs joined Facebook!

In all honesty, I was a little skeptical about adding a fan page for my blog because I'm a little skeptical about Facebook in general. But because I want to reach as many people as possible I figured it's one of the best ways to do that.

How many people are on Facebook? Like, everyone I know. And how often do these people go on Facebook? Like, multiple times a day. That's why it seemed so important to start a page.

If you have the time, come check me out! And I wasn't kidding when I said I just made this page! I'm lacking likes and content as of right now, but give me time and I assure you that my fan page will be the place to get updates and information.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Teen Pregnancy/Motherhood Interview

I've been wanting to interview other teen moms to post on my blog to give a little insight on what it's really like. Since I know a few other moms in real life who got pregnant as teenagers, I hope to get a few interviews from them but figured it might be helpful and encouraging for others to step up if I interviewed myself first.

Cole's Teen Pregnancy Interview

Pregnancy to Teen Mom

How old were you when you found out you were pregnant?

I had just turned 17 when I found out I was pregnant. What was your initial reaction?

I was really, really shocked! They weren't kidding in health class when they said you could get pregnant your first time. In all honesty, my first reaction was to terminate my pregnancy. I wasn’t ready to be a parent. I felt as if I could barely take care of myself let alone a baby who would be completely dependent on me for everything.How did your baby’s father react?

My boyfriend had the same reaction I did. He wasn’t ready to be a dad, just like I wasn’t ready to become a mom. He supported every decision I made though, even after I decided to keep our baby. What made you decide to go through with having a baby?

Honestly, it wasn’t until I saw the ultrasound that I chose not to get an abortion. I think that’s when I realized that there was a little person inside of me, and that little person was my baby and I didn’t want anyone to ever hurt her.

How did your friends and family react?

Nick and I didn’t tell anyone other than our two best friends about our pregnancy for the first five months. At that point there was no way I was going to able to hide an enormous pregnant belly, especially as the months got warmer and I had to start dressing in tank tops and shorts.

At five months pregnant though, everyone had suspicions. I had quit partying, smoking and hanging out all of a sudden with no real reasons as to why. My parents obviously noticed these things, too. Then there was the big weight gain, mostly in my stomach area, and my eating had increased a lot, too.

When Nick and I finally decided to tell people mostly everyone was excited. My mom took me maternity clothes shopping. I honestly thought my mom and dad would be furious, but they were very supportive.

What steps did you take to prepare for motherhood?Nick got a fulltime job that made really good money so he could financially support the three of us. We bought a car, and made sure to have all of the materialistic things needed to raise a baby; crib, blankets, bottles, etc. My friends and family members bought us a ton of stuff for our baby shower. Honestly, we didn’t even have to buy much. We were incredibly lucky.

The biggest thing was mentally preparing myself. I had never really been around babies or children before. I had no idea what I was doing, so I just dove headfirst into a ton of pregnancy and parenting books, especially What to Expect When You're Expecting
. I watched movies and television shows, but those mostly just scared me. I talked to my mom a lot about what to expect, and went to a couple appointments at the hospital to set up everything. And of course I always made to see my doctor regularly. I used to get my Grandma to drive me to my appointments before I told anyone I was pregnant. I told her it was for counseling.

When you were pregnant, did you notice that people treated you differently because you were young?

There were a few nurses at the hospital that were really rude. I did notice a lot of stares from people on the streets, but no one ever said anything. While finishing my last semester at school I was able to hide my growing stomach under baggy sweaters, so I didn't have to deal with classmates saying anything. If anyone had noticed, or had an opinion on my early pregnancy, they never said anything to my face.

How did becoming a teen mom affect your life?

Becoming a mom would change anyone’s life dramatically. The biggest thing though was not having my own place to live, or a high school diploma. Those things made me feel bad, and so I forced myself to become a much more responsible person. I rarely went out with friends, became a much more clean and organized person, and for the first time in years I had goals that I wanted to achieve like becoming healthier and looking into careers.

Did you have to take time off of school or were you able to graduate high school on time?

I did drop out senior year because I wanted to be home with my baby to raise her. Through correspondents and then later an adult learning center I was able to get all of my high school credits and graduate. What was the hardest part of being a teen mom?

Having to give up a lot of my spare time. I wasn’t used to being so selfless, but I quickly got used to my new mommy routine. I missed seeing my friends a lot, and not getting out as much. Being a mom can also be very mentally and physically draining, too. I had never felt so busy in my life.What are your plans for the future?

I’m in the process of applying to college right now. I want to go to school for journalism and become a fulltime writer. We’re trying to pay off our credit card debt, and save for our own apartment or house right now, too. Mostly, I just want to be able to provide everything Sidney needs to be a happy and healthy child.

There it is, my interview with myself.

If you were a teen mom and would like to answer the same questions feel free to contact me. You can send me a picture and I can link the interview back to your website/blog if you want. Or if you would prefer to stay anonymous that's fine, too.

The point of these simple interviews is to help give people an honest perspective of teen moms and hopefully erase some of the stereotypes us teen moms get thrown into.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Week In Review:

It's Friday everyone! It's the weekend, and my daughter is super excited to be able to stay home and play with her mommy (me! Aren't I a lucky duck?).

Home life is still tense right now. There's a lot on my mind; school, my living situation, money, and work. I feel bad because I haven't had much time to blog and work on my Etsy shop this week, but I enjoy this online life so I keep up with it as much as I can.

Personal Life:

Parenting - My patience has been really short lately. With all this added tension in the house and the silent arguments, my mind hasn't been in the right place. I feel awful for not being mentally here right now for Sidney but my stress levels are about to explode right through the roof.

We did go out for family day though. We went to Funworx, which is an indoor playground. It was so busy there! Kids on top of kids. Seriously, you could barely get around the place without knocking into a bunch of people, but Sidney and her cousin Faith had a lot of fun.

Growth - My entire life feels like it's on hold right now. Where did the week go? Honestly, I haven't done anything lately...

Health - My goal for waking up earlier hasn't been working out too well. Instead I feel like I just want to sleep forever, and ever, and ever.

Professional:

Work - I'm still applying to a bunch of different places. I haven't gotten one single call back though. It is a bit discouraging, but what other options do I have? I need to find a job.

My college funding application is almost complete! I just have to send in a couple more bits of information and off it will go. How exciting is that? Very!

Etsy - Little Shop of Hemp made it's first sale this week! A custom key chain. I was beginning to think my hemp store was a waste of time and money, but that one sale has encouraged me to keep trying. Besides, I enjoy making hemp jewelry.

As for Little Shop of Treasures, no sales this week. I do have some new items I need to post though. I'll get around to it soon. Been taking a mental health break this week. I have been approved for the Bloomin Earth festival though! In two months time I have to be all ready to set up a booth and sell some awesome vintage treasures. This will be my first sale, and I'm really nervous. That's why I've been doing a ton of research.

Writing - I've been feeling uninspired lately, so instead of writing much I have been reading a ton! Magazine articles, ebooks, blogs and novels. Just filling my brain with other people's work. Of course my journal has been getting a lot of attention this week, I should call it the Whine Diaries.

I hope everyone's week has been going better than mine! Sorry for the pity-party-post, but that's all I have to say this week - wah, wah, wah.