Reinventing Our Family

A blog by Abby Maslin about loving and learning after TBI

My name is Abby Maslin and the experience of caring for someone with a brain injury has taught me much about living fully and the power of gratitude. Being a caregiver is more than a full-time job. It’s a terrifying and exhilarating rollercoaster ride. By sharing our experiences honestly — both the good and the bad — caregivers can work to support each other in a more authentic and meaningful way.

No one asks to be impacted by brain injury, but with tenacity we are capable of so much more than we ever dreamed. There is a life beyond brain injury for those who are willing to stretch their mind. Learn more about Abby >

The Latest from Abby

When my husband suffered a catastrophic brain injury at age 29, I rarely appreciated being told that God had a plan for us. I certainly didn’t want to be coached to keep my eye on the prize or to search for those silver linings. I wanted to cry out in pain and to sit in it for a moment. I simply wanted it to be what it was: hard. And I wanted that to be OK with everyone else too.

What do readers in the brain injury world want? I can only guess that like me; they want it all: practical solutions, resources & references, a place to vent, a place to grieve, a place to interact with people who "get it."

Here comes another caregiver confession: sometimes I feel guilty. No matter how hard my day has been, no matter how much my body hurts, or how overwhelmed my head feels, I know it will never compare to the challenges my husband faces in navigating this complicated world as a TBI survivor.

When her husband was first home from the hospital, Abby Maslin realized she would have to teach him who he was before he was hurt -- from someone who liked to shower daily to reading the paper on Sunday mornings.

When to stay? When to go? When to get professional help? These are some of the hardest questions we will face in our post-TBI lives. These are gut-wrenching decisions to make. I know that not only from my own experience, but from the network of caregivers I communicate with everyday.

I never wish to glamorize the process of returning to work, nor unfairly claim credit for it. TC was at the helm for most of this journey. With that said, there are a few pieces of wisdom I’ve gathered from the experience...

Brain injury has been a type of boot camp for our family, a crash course in thickening our skins and tackling struggle head-on. And although none of us signed up for it willingly, I think we can all agree it’s been strenuous and valuable preparation for whatever challenges lie ahead.

Immediately following a brain injury, outsiders often reiterate to survivors how grateful they are for that person’s survival and how accepting they plan to b. But when put to the test in everyday life, we quickly discover it’s tough to respond with unwavering compassion.

This program is made possible in part by a grant from the Bob Woodruff Foundation, which is dedicated to ensuring that post-9/11 injured service members, veterans, and their families make a successful transition.