But WC has always wondered about the Antichrist. The opposite of Jesus, right? Turns wine into water? WC can do that, using only his kidneys. Makes a hale man lame? WC done that to himself using nothing more than birthdays. Makes a seeing man blind? WC is still working on that, but has so far made it only to bifocal glasses. So maybe WC is the Antichrist?

WC is pretty sure that demons, devils, Hell and souls exist only in the fevered imagination of Mr. Straub. There certainly was a holy inquisition, but that was in another country and, besides, the members are all dead.[^2] Doubtlessly, they are now in their imaginary Hell, with their souls being chewed by imaginary demons and devils.

And WC regards blasphemy as the very silliest of sins. An omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent Creator cares what his creations say about him? Dude, he already knows. That’s what the Omni-everythings mean.

Didn’t Bruce Willis already prevent Armageddon? Or if he didn’t, isn’t it inescapable, having been foretold?

Perhaps Mr. Straub with his vague reference to “this evil” is referring to this blog. Perhaps WC’s affection for Sir Terry, often expressed in this blog, and WC’s reading recommendations to you, means that the blog itself is evil – sorry, EVIL! – and that, as a heretic and witch, WC’s writings endanger the souls of everyone who reads Wickersham’s Conscience.

Or perhaps Mr. Straub is just another internet troll, getting his rocks off in an internet troll’s very strange way.

Anyway, you’ve been warned.[^3]

(As a treat for Pratchett fans, here’s an interview of Pratchett by his friend and co-writer, Neil Gaiman.)

[^1]: Portions of this blog post are borrowed from the ancient alt.books.pratchett newsgroup.

[^3]: Of course, anyone who reads Pratchett – at whatever peril to their soul – knows from the novel Good Omens that the real Antichrist is a nine year old boy in rural England named Adam Young. And also understands about footnotes.