Decisions have been made and I plan on sticking to them this time. Not that my parents have heard them yet, but well in the end the only thing to think is am I happy with what is happening and the answer to that one is no, not at this moment in time and when things sort themselves out well I hope and pray that I will be a lot happier and maybe things will work out for the best.

The decision is as follows... I resit my tax exam 1st June 2009. I'll find out the results in August. At the point in time if I have failed it again I'm walking away from studying for the ACCA and just concentrating on getting enough experience to move forward.

There seriously is no point in spending hours studing for exams to continually fail and become more and more depressed over being a complete idiot. The only reason to study is to learn something you are passionate about (or to get your degree! Been there done that don't need the heartache again!) I have a degree in Economic (2:2 I know but that's my own fault for not bothering to apply myself when it came to my dissertation). I have several bookkeeping qualifications (manual and computer). I have my ECDL to prove I can use a computer. I have A-Levels and GCSEs which in the grand scheme of things tend not mean anything, but I have them you know! I can take evening classes to get more 'work based' qualifications, but to do my job I have history. I don't intend to ever own my own practice and if I become a partner well I can always apply for fellowship and the other partners can always sign off the accounts. I'm happy to be qualified by experience I need more of that, but I'd say doing this job since the summer of my 16th year that's a hell of a lot of experience (10 years, see I can count!)

So what will I do with all this extra time, supposing I get it! I might apply for a part-time job. Or I might go to evening classes, might take my GCSE/A-Level in history or try and redo my A-Level maths and get the full A instead of the AS. I'll try to have more of a life. Take my confirmation classes as I've been saying I will for more years that I care to remember, anyway I know my Grandad would have wished it and my Nanna would like to see me do it one day soon. I'll work harder towards owing my own home (which might necessitate the second job!). I'll try seeing my friends more often. Become more active, go walking. Do some more actual reading instead of spending my life reading fic (no matter how delicious it maybe I can't talk about it in RL now can I?! Or can I?! I've never really worked that one out, there have ever only been a few people I can talk to about it and well I don't think I talk to them anymore which is totally my own fault. So no one to blame there!)

Travel oh I'm going to travel when I want again. No more fitting it around studying! Just suddenly decide "next week I'm going here...." and do it. Hey and if what Lindsay implied last time I talked to him about pay etc I'll get more if I don't study :)!

I've been looking at houses/flats etc. The cheapest ones are all too far away from work and actually they don't have full ownership it's 25% - 50& - 75% which I'm not sure would be good, but then it'd be a start on the ladder. The question being would I ever be able to get a mortgage? My pay is terrible to say the least and I know I don't have to pay out very much owning a home would involve all sorts of bills like phone, net, gas, elec, insurance, food, repairs, cleaning etc. What a daunting prospect, but it's got to happen sometime really hasn't it?! I'd rather own than rent. Rental is just dead money and if you don't have to it's not worth it. You could save the rental money and by time you got to the end of what would be a normal contract you'd have a reasonable deposit saved.

A new car might be on the horizon for me. Well my Dad keeps say I should get a BMW 1 Series which is the small BMW. I need something that will do long miles and be easy to run. My car does alright, but it's a petrol and I usually end up filling every week and a half. It is 28 miles to work every day so by the end of the week I've done 280 miles. Poor baby car has put on a whole lot of mileage over the 2 years I've owned her (not even including the odd trip to Scotland and driving weekends and to clients etc)!

Have I rambled enough? I guess I have. It's now 6.45pm and I should probably be doing something constructive like tidying or just pretending to do so!