served ice-cold, with a twist
by Planet Earth's first post-progressive blogger

Friday, May 27, 2005

Official Colours of Canada: From the Crusades

I have to admit that I have recently developed a very un-Canadian trait: I have grown intolerant of being told "as a Canadian" what I think or want or don't want by our rogue government and its sycophantic press.

The rogue government's democracy-withering actions of late have inspired me to undertake a review of our traditions. Following our rogue government's lead, it is time to call into question everything traditionally Canadian.

Where better to start this journey to discover what is and is not "Canadian" than our rogue government's official websites?

So, in the interest of equality, diversity and respect, I share with you some of my findings.

Here's one - I didn't know this until today! Canada's official colours are explained at an official Canadian government website:

History records that in the First Crusade Bohemund I, a Norman lord, had red crosses cut from his mantles and distributed to the 12,000 crusaders, who wore them as a distinctive badge on their garments.

In subsequent crusades, each nation was distinguished by a cross of a different colour. France long had a red cross on its banners while England used a white cross. Time and again in history red and white are found as the colours of France or of England.

Red and white - the colours of the Crusades! Of course! Remarkable that a country which embraces diversity and respect, and also has a fast-growing Islamic community alludes to the Crusades in explaining its official colours (parenthetical side note for additional research: aren't these Crusades colours also the official colours of the Liberal Party of Canada?)

Here's another: how about our national anthem? The official lyrics are online as well.

God keep our land glorious and free! O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

"In all thy sons command"? Wait a minute, what about "all thy daughters"? Patriotism is not just for fellows, is it? It's blatantly sexist!

"God keep our land"? We're excluding the aetheists and the secular humanists! And how about our aboriginals that don't worship 'God'? I'm sure Allah is not very pleased about being passed over either. This line has to go!

Since traditions don't mean much in Canada anymore, thanks to the fine example set by our rogue government, can we now dispense with the old, formal English 'thee and thy'? It sounds, well, so King James Bible-ish. Too religious. Too Christian. Too scary.

That's it: our national athem is sexist and scary. While we are gutting the country of inconsequential traditions, such as holding or observing the result of non-confidence votes in Parliament, let's give the toss to a sexist, and scary national athem. And those colours. For God's sake, choose something other than colours of the Crusades!