rottenscallop.com

Where something always smells fishy!

35-year old New Bedford man self identifies as Pee Wee footballer, dominates league

A 35-year old New Beford man is shattering records, and sometimes bones, in the New Bedford Youth Football League this year. Jim “The Whale” Smith was recently allowed to play against 11-year olds after he self-identified as a 7th grade “Pee Wee” league footballer.

“I eat, live and breathe football,” stated Jim. “It’s the thing I live for and when I heard about self identifying I just couldn’t resist.”

“We didn’t even have to sue the state to let Jim play,” said John David, Jim’s family lawyer. “As soon as we mentioned ‘self identify’ the league capitulated and let him play.”

Jim has dominated the league, shattering year long records in a single game.

“In my first game I scored 19 touchdowns out of 20 times carrying the ball. The only time I didn’t score was when an unconscious kid’s arm got caught in my belt. I dragged him for a while, but he definitely slowed me down just enough to allow the other 12 kids to catch up and take me down.”

Not everyone one is on Jim’s side.

“A few parents were angry that a 250-pound, 35-year old man was allowed to play with 11-year olds,” Said Jim’s lawer. “But after being called out on their intolerance and racism, a few boycotts and getting fined by the state they came around to our side. Now the entire community supports Jim.”

I believe Jeff was referring to the last sentence of Bill’s post, but yes, the contraction was inappropriate. Jeff also used “Its” when it should have been “It’s.” The lesson here is to double check your grammar and spelling if you’re going to be a Grammar Nazi. I just triple checked this. 🙂

Seems a little narrow minded assuming all Fox News folks are stupid. Myself and many friends agree Fox is slanted but a hundred miles from stupid. You however have apparently learned to Parrot what your family wants to hear from you. Have a nice day

Pathetic!!! Play with kids your own age! Its not intolerant or racist or anything but pathetic!! He can seriously hurt the kids. What’s wrong with the parents, pull out your kids and form your own league, the baby Huey would have to play with kids his own size!

I’m offended by the gall of this man! I was forced to retire from Pee Wee Football at age 30 – they said it was mandatory. I’m contacting the ACLU – I want my rights! Me and my wheelchair will slaughter that bum.

This is a parody regarding the “self-identity” of those who want to use the restroom that they ‘identify’ with. Haha. I think it’s a really good scenario to show how ridiculous it is that we should allow a man/boy use the women/girls restrooms just because they ‘identify’ as one.

I love it. So many who refuse to actually read the article. So many who don’t even know what ‘self-identifying’ means or why it’s a topic at all. So many who don’t read The Onion. It’s a joke, girls and boys. It’s sarcasm, putting a grown man into a situation he’s clearly not suited for…

…the same situation as grown men who self-identify as girls and sue for the right to use the women’s bathroom. The same as white women who ‘self-identify’ (they are, because they *say* they are) as black and then go on to call the rest of us ‘racist’. The whole stupid hand-wringing schmear. Welcome to America. If you don’t have a real problem and a reason to hate your neighbor, we’ll help you find one. Or make one up.

Y’all do realize the pics in this story are screenshots taken from a show called King of Queens? This story is pure satire, however, it perfectly paints the picture of how ignorant one looks while “pretending” to be something they’re not.

This was on King of Queens you idiots. This article is a parody making fun of the transgender bathroom controversy. A grown man playing Pee wee football is as rediculous as a grown man wanting to go in a girls bathroom.

The article is funny, but all the complete idiots that can’t tell that it’s satire are where the real joke is at. I can’t decide if I should laugh at the stupidity or be terrified at where society is headed when people like this being allowed to reproduce.