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I Was Raised On Mid 2000’s Rock And I’m Just Not Gonna Take It Anymore

Look, I’m not one for taking control of my own emotions. You know my weaknesses and you know how to hurt me. But I’m twenty-five, and now that I think about it, all of that stuff I heard on the Alternative Rock station 1.047 THE GRIND in 2004 was right. It was you who was smothering me all along.

Your love was like a bullet to my heart AND my brain at the same time. You were the knife in my chest and the kiss on my lips. But I just can’t keep running baaaaaaaaaack to youuuuuuuuuu. You have to let me go, let me go.

I don’t know much about the government, but I do know about the pain I feel inside, swallowing me whole. It’s a pain that feels so good, but is so bad for me. It’s a pain that I know, and a pain that I adore. But I can’t love it anymore, because honestly, it’s bad for my emotional well-being.

I’m mentally unwell. There’s something wrong in my brain, this sickness in my skull. It creeps around like a rat in a cage. Seriously, I am paying a thousand dollars for therapy this month. But still you keep climbing in my bed, and running through my head. It’s like a bomb that goes off, and all that’s left are my own broken bones. All my broken dreams.

But really, have you heard of parasitism? I enjoy falling into you, feeling your insides, but we sleep on a twin bed because graphic design career is still in the very, very formative stages. I think I might need to get a second job. My Dad says that I should look into going to grad school. So, here I am, crumbling in front of you. And all you can do is laugh, but you’re still the one I want, despite all the hurt inside of meeeeeeeeee.

All your words cut me deep.

I really don’t want to live in Queens anymore.

You’ve left scars on me, scars that won’t seem to heal. So I scream. I scream at you and at the world. I just can’t take it anymore. I have to say goodbye…