Closely. Simply. Freely.

Best Mom Tip #104: Enjoy the celebrity guest star

I’ve had several moments over the last week that made me sigh at my current job. And by job I mean 24 hour on-demand concierge for 3 irrational beings.

I sighed when my 2-year-old yelled at me, demanding that I immediately change his dirty diaper, but who refused to sit on the potty 3 minutes earlier when I noticed that a diaper change would be imminent.

I sighed when I woke up to realize that, while the 3-month-old slept for 8 straight hours, I was woken up by the other two kids 4 times during those 8 hours.

I sighed when my husband attended a dinner at my favorite (and very expensive) restaurant with some head honchos from his company while I ate blue pancakes, green eggs, and yellow milk with my kids. We are out of red food coloring.

I sighed when I cut my son’s hair with a set of clippers and my daughter pitched a fit because she wanted to have a hair cut at home, too. It did no good to explain that the only time I had ever cut girl hair was the day before 8th grade picture day and thus explains my crooked bangs preserved for all time. I don’t think she heard me over her moans about the unfairness of life.

I sighed when I realized that if Sarah Jessica Parker and Jimmy Fallon were the guests on Sesame Street this week, it means that they are talking to me. I’m the grownup that is being thrown a bone by the producers in the hopes that of the 43 hours of children’s television on in a given day, I will pick them. It may be the only way I can see people I used to watch before I had children. Back when it was Sonny Bono and John Denver, I didn’t really get it.

On the plus side, SJP was waiting for Big on a park bench who turned out to be Big Bird. There was even a Sex and the City theme song fade-out. Jimmy Fallon did a pretty funny Bear Grylls impression while “lost” in Sesame Street. If I have to watch Muppets, at least now I’m getting all the jokes.