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IMO once you've tried such responses on two separate occasions and the shit's still kicking off on a semi regular basis, the best bet is just to get the fuck out of Dodge. Life is too short to waste on people who need to play a game; drama queens will find drama until the day they decide to stop looking for it, and not before.

Edit - that applies to both sexes, equally.

Edited April 4, 2017 by Fully DetachedGender neutralism or something like that

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This looks like Eric Berne game analysis. TA is a real eye opener into toxic human interactions most of which are recurrent scenarios rendered inscrutable to most by covert and displaced agendas, alliances and payoffs.

For instance, in my own family, my aunt and uncle have recently fallen out with their daughter over what looks from the outside as something fairly trivial. However what preceded it was a period of unrelated marital strife which could have led to divorce, now "resolved" with them teaming up against against a "bad daughter", thus rendering that dispute effectively insoluble as it has become the glue holding their marriage together.