Category: Writing

Filtering language distances the reader from an experience by filtering it through another character. Removing the filter allows the reader to experience firsthand rather than secondhand.

If you read, “Abraham Lincoln saw snowflakes out the window,” you’re probably picturing a window with snowflakes falling down, the view slightly obstructed by the president’s trademark stovepipe hat. But if you read, “Abraham Lincoln went to the window. Snowflakes were falling and sticking to the glass,” you see Mr. President going to the window, and then you see what he is seeing, for yourself. The first example had filtering. The second did not have filtering.

Keep reading for more types of constructions some readers might find bothersome. Click “View Original Post” and skip to the very bottom for a list of overused words you can refer to while revising.

If you spend some time in writer critique circles, I’m sure you’ve heard the well-intended advice to delete words “that” or “was” from your writing. I’m here to clarify when you should, and when you SHOULDN’T, delete these words.

Following the superhero theme from last month’s posts on Batman and Harvey Dent, I wanted to revisit fear and motivation with Tony Stark—A.K.A. Iron Man—in a quick character study.

This is a man of many vices, but Tony Stark’s cardinal sin is sloth. He is afraid of failure, so he doesn’t apply himself. His goal is to be “safe” and comfortable. Some people might say he’s afraid of losing more people (like Bruce Wayne, Tony Stark is a billionaire orphan), so he wants to be in control (greed).

But he doesn’t actively try to be in control.

He wants Pepper to take over the business so he can tinker in his basement.

Tony is afraid of committing to her, and he’s afraid of committing to others, which is why his coming out and saying “I am Iron Man” is the conclusion to his first arc. He’s finally committing himself, and he’s committing himself to the entire nation.

See how you can use the “seven deadly sins” as inspiration for character motivation in this post from the archives…

Welcome to Fiction Friday! We are currently in the middle of the Character Series. Last week I posted the Character Worksheets and included a little schpiel on the Cardinal Sins (Seven Deadly Sins). Today I’m going to go into each with a little more detail to illustrate how they can be used as a way to view character motivations. Why the Cardinal Sins? No, I’m not trying to prognosticate here. Two reasons I like this method of summarizing motivations: 1) as a part of popular culture, the idea of the seven sins is familiar to many people, both religious and wholly secular. 2) It’s a reminder that no character is a saint. Few things are more yawn-inducing than a character that is perfectly perfect.

As long as you consider the motivations of your characters, and as long as their actions come about because of what motivates them on the inside,

For comic book fans, Harvey’s captivation comes when he pulls out the coin to flip for who will lead in the courtroom and Rachel calls him Harvey. DC fans know that Harvey is Two-Face’s real name, and coin-flipping is his trademark, so once he’s introduced, they automatically know who he is and whom he becomes.

For viewers who may not be as familiar with Batman villains, their captivation is just how likable this guy is, and how easy it is to root for him:

RACHEL

I’m serious, Harvey, you don’t leave things like this to chance.

HARVEY

I don’t.
(sincere)
I make my own luck.

And if that’s not enough to make you like Harvey, then watch his whole opening scene:

Clearly Harvey Dent is the heroic type, right?

Change, Reaction

Dent calls Gordon into his office to partner with Gordon. He also acknowledges that Gordon works with Batman, but it’s all in subtext until Gordon clues the audience in:

HARVEY

Fancy stuff for a city cop. Have help?

GORDON

We liaise with various agencies—

HARVEY

Save it, Gordon. I want to meet him.

GORDON

Official policy is to arrest the vigilante known as Batman on sight.

As soon as Harvey partners with Gordon (and consequently Batman), Harvey’s story begins to change.

[Meanwhile, Bruce follows a lead and asks Fox for a new suit]

When his date with Rachel gets crashed by Bruce Wayne, Harvey unknowingly, reluctantly meets Bruce is Batman. Harvey wins over Bruce, who decides to throw him a fundraiser. This sequence has plenty of lines to dig into. For one, Harvey clearly respects Batman and considers what he does to be not an honor, but a public service. He says he might be up to taking up Batman’s mantle. This is also when Harvey says this thematic (and prophetic) line:

HARVEY

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Complication, Enemies & Flaws

Later, Harvey meets with Gordon and Batman. Gordon and Harvey both blame each other for a leak to the mob, and we’re reminded that Harvey came from Internal Affairs and had investigated all of Gordon’s cops. Gordon, Harvey, and Batman all agree that Lau (a Chinese businessman and basically the entire mob’s accountant) needs to be brought in if they want to take down Gotham’s crime ring. But Batman is the only one who can do it, because Gordon and Harvey don’t have jurisdiction in China, and Batman doesn’t need jurisdiction. Harvey is still bound by the law—he’s helpless here, but he does makes the call that Batman should go, and he accepts that there will be consequences:

Enemies & Flaws: Going Rogue for Rachel

plays Russian Roulette with the thug, then tosses his coin for the thug’s life—but in both of these cases, he’s bluffing.

is caught “torturing” the thug by Batman, who admonishes him

gets angry at Batman for considering turning himself in

We see a bit into Harvey’s fatal flaws in these sequences. First, we see that he admires the capacity for judgment:

MAYOR

549 criminals at once?! How did you get Surrillo to hear this farce?

HARVEY

She shares my enthusiasm for justice. After all, she is a judge.

Second, we see what he has to lose.

BATMAN

You’re the symbol of hope that I could never be. Your stand against organized crime is the first legitimate ray of light in Gotham for decades. If anyone saw this, everything would be undone—all the criminals you got off the streets would be released.

Note—Batman is talking about organized crime. But Harvey already knows he’s not dealing with organized crime with the Joker—he’s dealing with disorganized, unpredictable, chaotic crime. And that means his tactics need to shift. They will at the midpoint…

Confrontation, Elation

This next scene is definitely the midpoint. It happens dead center of the movie, and it’s a major turning point in the plot.

Harvey tells the press that he is the Batman.

This doesn’t sound like a “confrontation.” It’s not a physical one, surely. Harvey is trying to take the fall for Batman so Batman can continue doing his job. This action is still a confrontation between Harvey and Batman. Harvey is making his own luck. (And how does he do that? By taking away Batman’s agency.)

Alfred offers Rachel (and the audience) some insight to why Harvey may have decided to claim the cowl, as well as why Bruce allowed him to:

ALFRED

Perhaps both Bruce and Mr. Dent believe that Batman stands for something more important than a terrorist’s whims, Miss Dawes, even if everyone hates him for it. That’s the sacrifice he’s making—to not be a hero. To be something more.

This harkens back to the conversation between Rachel, Harvey, and Bruce back at the restaurant, when they were talking about a Roman guardian of a city doing it not for honor, but as a public service.

The ensuing car chase with Dent in an armored car, acting as bait to catch the Joker, seems like it shouldn’t be any sort of Elation sequence, but Dent is actually enjoying it—in the script, as well as in the movie, Dent is smiling and calm amidst the gunfire and chaos. He is pleased.

And then Batman, Gordon, and Dent catch the Joker. Elation.

Collapse, Gloom

So of course the collapse comes next. Dent is captured and brought to a warehouse to die or be rescued. So is Rachel. They’re each given a 50/50 chance to live, because they know Batman will only be able to rescue one of them.

Harvey tries to move but falls, accidentally dousing the left side of his face with gasoline.

Batman, thinking he’s gone to where Rachel was, shows up to Harvey’s warehouse. Harvey is helpless as Rachel is blown up. On the way out of the building, as it, too, explodes, Harvey’s face catches fire.

Harvey wakes up in the hospital and finds his coin—the one he’d given to Rachel—at his bedside.

Half his face is destroyed. One of the faces of the coin is damaged, too.

Comprehension, Action

The Joker finds Harvey in the hospital and releases him from his restraints. The Joker says Gordon and the mob are all schemers, and that Harvey used to be a schemer, too, but he (the Joker) is an agent of chaos … because chaos is fair.

Harvey pulls out his coin. Now it’s not a lucky coin. He can’t make his own luck anymore. His agency was taken away by chance. Now chance will govern his decisions.

Dent looks down at the coin in his hands. Turns it over, feels its comforting weight. Shows the Joker the good side.

HARVEY

You live.

He turns the coin over. The flip side is deeply scarred.

HARVEY

You die.

First Action: Wuertz

After chance dictates the Joker’s fate at the hands of Harvey, Harvey—as Two-Face—goes on a murderous rampage, targeting everyone who was tied to Rachel’s death and flipping his coin to decide if he kills them or incapacitates them.

His first victim is Detective Wuertz, who had picked him up and brought him to the warehouse.

Third Action: Ramirez and Gordon’s Family

Curveball Confidence, Final Exam

Lt. Gordon shows up to the place where Rachel died to find his wife and children huddling together. Harvey disarms Gordon.

Chance might be the judge determining someone’s fate, but Harvey is still a prosecutor. More than that: now he decides who should be on trial.

He’s got Gordon exactly where he wants him, especially after he puts his gun up to the head of Gordon’s little boy. Harvey is confident that Gordon is going to get a “fair” trial.

Then Batman shows up, and it’s time for Harvey’s final exam.

BATMAN

You don’t want to hurt the boy, Dent.

HARVEY

It’s not what I want. It’s about what’s fair.(To Gordon and Batman)
You thought we could be decent men in an indecent world. You thought we could lead by example. You thought the rules could be bent but not break … You were wrong. The world is cruel.
(Shows his coin)
And the only morality in a cruel world is chance. Unbiased. Unprejudiced. Fair.

Harvey has lost his morality and his sense of goodness. He was the one who needed to hear Rachel’s advice to “Please keep your faith in people.”

Remember when Harvey was boasting about the judge being enthusiastic about justice? For Two-Face, justice means retribution. Justice is punishment. And if he was punished (losing Rachel, burned half to death) when he was doing good (trying to take down the mob), then his punishment must have been determined by chance.

The scariest villains are the ones we empathize with. The ones whose motivations kinda make some sense.

Culmination

Batman urges Harvey to punish the three people responsible for Rachel’s death—Batman, Harvey, and Gordon. So Harvey flips a coin for Batman…

…and shoots him.

For himself…

…and he lives.

For Gordon’s son…

…and Batman takes him out. Two-Face is dead.

Resolution

For Harvey’s resolution, we need to go to Bruce Wayne’s side of the story.