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"The Real Bev" wrote in message
...
My mom, the long-time rabid Dodger fan, is disgusted. Dodger
Stadium is ugly,
the unknown team members don't have names, and she wants the
management boiled
in oil. She wouldn't go so far as to support the Giants, though.
Nobody
could be that sick.

You think that Dodger Stadium is ugly? I have always thought it was
pretty good looking. They're doing pretty good this year too, except
for that last series against the ADB.

As for supporting the Giants; The only thing more unthinkable than
that would be to support the Spankees.

lal_truckee wrote:
**** - who need paper? Wipe with snow - clean your hands by rubbing more
snow on them - worked fine up in the watershed at Solitude when I left a
gift for mormons due to deficient restrooms when serious need hit a
couple of months ago. When's that outhouse pump-out scheduled?

Snow works great for a day or two. Frostbitten hemmorhoids are not what
you want to mention in the exit interview as your reason for not
summiting. And the research I've seen is that the "expedition ****s"
are not from the freeze dried food, but poor toilet
habits. Antibacterial non-water hand cleaner is key. It's bad enough
as it is. Believe me.

As for supporting the Giants; The only thing more unthinkable than
that would be to support the Spankees.

Yogi Bera almost warped me for life. He was on the DL and was the special
guest at my little league try outs when I was 6. I'd been to the dentist
earlier that morning and my whole right side of my face was still numb. I
was a little nervous gunning for a catching job, and bit completely through
my lip chewing on it. I could squirt blood and spit right out the hole.

Yogi thought I got hit in the face with a ball. He slapped me on the butt and
said, "You got ****in' balls kid!"

I got home and told mom, "Yogi says I got ****in' balls! What's that mean?"

Yogi almost warped me. But Willie Mays saved my ass. And I got my ass beat
that October because I wouldn't quit crying after the Giants lost the
Series. Besides, when the San Fransico Giants Baseball Club gives me
a pair of comp tickets to View Seats for a home game it just proves my
point that an ass beating never solved anything.

You want to know why I didn't get my ass beat when I asked mom what "****in'
balls," meant. Well, see, Dad had just got back from two Med Cruises on the
USS Midway...
--
According to John Perry Barlow, "Jeff Davis is a truly gifted trouble-maker."

**** - who need paper? Wipe with snow - clean your hands by rubbing more
snow on them - worked fine up in the watershed at Solitude when I left a
gift for mormons due to deficient restrooms when serious need hit a
couple of months ago. When's that outhouse pump-out scheduled?

I bet you roll your own tampons too.
--
According to John Perry Barlow, "Jeff Davis is a truly gifted trouble-maker."

Oops! The Giants Rockies Series is over the 19th, and I promised the
Amazon I'd drive her car out to Indianapolis for her. I won't fly back
into DIA until the 25th. How can you say no to a 6' raven tressed sultry
vixen you've loved for 15 years?
--
According to John Perry Barlow, "Jeff Davis is a truly gifted trouble-maker."