Yes, a time-traveling sap named Plook. He's at it again, too, in the present time. Someone stole a buttload of maple syrup from the big syrup repository in Quebec. (They stockpile syrup like we stockpile oil. Who's to say the Canadians aren't smarter, eh?) Makes you wonder, just how big is this not-so-secret basement of Plook's?

Plook misspells words on purpose just to make me pull out what's left of my hair. "(F)acted?" It took me an hour to figure out he meant "faked." Don't they send a weenie warmer/spell checker on these junkets with you? Think what you're doing to the poor Quebecois who's trying to understand English.

I'm drawing a blank here...have all day. Maybe I can work around it. When Plook mentioned Pollock yesterday, I didn't think of drop cloths or splattergun millionaires. No, I, your semi-professional bogus Pope, naturally thought of fish. It was Friday, after all. What good prelate wouldn't think of fish? Gots to have my sanctified Filet O' Fish TM. Maybe even some shrimp at the Hometown Buffet later. So anyhow, I'm knoshing away and reading the FOF wrapper in my Pope-mo-cycle and it says the fish is carp and catfish farmed in some of Plook's many not-so-secret basements. Rumor has it that he also farms shitake and cubensis mushrooms in other not-so-secret grottos, ghettos and caverns and also that he's almost cornered the world market in bat guano. I really must talk with my broker.

Plook thinks the Kybalion is a user manual for the Higgs-boson particle,which explains the communication protocol between the negative anti-particlesresiding at the imploded bigbang location and the regular positive particles in the observable Universe

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