Spicy Pumpkin Private Parts? Astroglide To Sell Pumpkin Lube

The company says the Spicy Pumpkin personal lubricant will feature the same quality as other lubricants offered by Astroglide. A spokesperson says the product is “water-based, water-soluble, and condom-compatible, but with the subtle taste and smell of America’s favorite gourd.”

Oddly, the company says that demand for a Pumpkin flavored and scented lube has been increasing over the years. “Those women buying pumpkin lattes, pumpkin muffin mix, pumpkin candles, and pumpkin body lotion need lube just like everyone else,” says another rep. “When fall hits, we want that part of our consumer base to think, ‘The weather’s getting colder; what I really need right now is a pumpkin-flavored c*ck.'”

Astroglide doesn’t expect men to flock to the product. As a member of the male demographic I can fully understand the desire to avoid having a pumpkin smelling penis.

The company says it believes men will buy the Spicy Pumpkin lubricant because it will help get them laid. Perhaps they are right but that statement is oddly disturbing.

The new Pumpkin-inspired Astroglide lubricant will be offered in a warming liquid and will debut in Fall 2014.