Anti-Vaxers Are Worried Their Dogs Will Get Autism!

April 26, 2018

Yep, thats right! Life doesn’t challenge you enough? Do you, as the parent of a special needs kid, find yourself wishing you had more to do? Well you’re in luck! Now you can get an Autistic dog. Thats right I am just hanging out doing some work & my wife sends me a link to a news story from the Telegraph but I quickly found it several places around the web. It seems people who think vaccines cause autism are now worried it might happen to their dogs as well. Wait, does that mean they are going to put up a go fund me to buy an autism service dog for their autistic service dog for their autistic kid? Man that’s going to get expensive. Okay okay but really this is a real story…okay not a real story because these people are fruit loops if they are out there trying to get me to give a flying….. I don’t care if your worried your dog has autism. No vaccines will not cause autism in your dog. No vaccines will not cause autism in your kid. Obviously the cause of autism is a combination of things that my dog & my son have in common like drooling in their sleep, looking at me like I’m speaking a foreign language, & of course turning their nose up at any food I prepare for them.

You know this actually explains a lot. My boarder collie is always refusing to make eye contact with me & other times she will play with things that aren’t really toys like sticks instead of the frisbee I bought her. Man, my dog may in fact have autism. Would it be wrong to go back through my instagram & hashtag any photos of my dog #SpecialNeedsFurParent because I kind of want to now. Okay all kidding aside what the hell is wrong with people? It’s bad enough there are parents out there that still believe that Lee Harvey Oswald was just a puppet for big Pharma to distract everyone while they put secret autism juice in all of our vaccines but now this. Really. I’d rather debate flat earthers than hear one more person tell me that they have a friend who has a kid who has was fine until they got vaccine then they had autism. Man I just can’t deal. If you are reading this & are super pissed at me because you in fact believe your kid got autism from their doctor please don’t be mad at me. Please don’t post a 3 page comment telling me about it. I’m never going to convince you that sound medical science has proven there are no links between autism & vaccines just like you are never going to convince me that the titanic was sunk as a cover up for Irish government pumping autism into the oceans. Thanks & have a great day.