This thread is a compilation of three threads which were all started by the same person. They were merged into one thread since the person is probably not worthy of having three separate threads in the hall. The original thread begins here, and the links below will "jump" to the first posts in the second and third threads.

So I was in Paradise Cafe today for lunch and it was jam packed. There was this guy that was sitting in a booth all by his lonesome and had a sweet lookin laptop. The dude gets a call on his cell phone and decides to take the call outside. I was perplexed because he just left his laptop all by itself. So, its now been 15 minutes and the guy is STILL outside on the phone!

I thought to myself that I really needed a new laptop and this one was there for the taking. Well, there were no cameras in there and it was so busy that no one would notice so I went up to it casually and folded it up and exited the opposite door from him. Like taking candy from a baby.

And I dont feel too bad because the guy didnt have any business or work related stuff on there, just a couple of photo albums. Hey, if he is too stupid to leave his laptop alone for more than 15 minutes then he deserved it.

Anyway, I'm thinking about one of these little ****ers, Midnight. They're not cheap, they bite and they ejaculate a lot at the drop of a hat (haven't figured that one out yet), but I think one would look good on you.

My first time on the CP in a month which I've spent reading 700 posts of this thread so I feel I have to post my $.02 or this time will have been for naught - haha.

For the record, I would probably get with the chick on the -dbags right in post #1 - but she could stand to lose some weight. haha

Blonde chick in post #1 not hot. haha

Butterface - Peter Griffin said it the best "It's like trying to pick the winner between Sarah Jessica Parker and Kristen Dunst in a hot body/weird face contest." LOL (Thought I'd change it up for variety's sake)

Anyone who needs to brag about their car, money they make, or hotness of chicks they are banging are just sad. (BTW, I'm 27 - not some old dude).