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Hey gang. The Royal Rumble is in the history books, and these are my thoughts on tonight’s show. Forgive me if I forgot something major or if this isn’t the neatest looking post show review from me. I’m tired.

1) Unfortunately, my Twitter account got banned from posting during most of the rumble, and I had no backup account to tweet the goings on. So, if you wondered where the hell I went during the show, that’s where I was. I will be rectifying this mistake and making an jailed account right after I push send on this post. Moving on.

2) John Cena vs Randy Orton

What a mess this turned into. I went into this match ambivalent about what would happen or who would win, but the 2nd biggest shock of the night was the live crowd turning on both participants and chanting for Divas, Y2J, Randy Savage (and others that I can’t remember) and vocally letting Cena and Randy know that their efforts weren’t needed. I haven’t heard such a visceral reaction since Brock Lesnar vs Goldberg at Wrestlemania 20.

It was the type of reaction that took me out of the match, and combined with my feeling of not wanting to see this in the first place, this was the worst match of the night by default. I felt sorry for Cena and Orton while they were working, but clearly the fans are tired of seeing these two wrestle. BUT, there was something fantastic that happened at the end of this match that made up for things.

3) Post John Cena vs Randy Orton

I’ve read spoilers for the “big 6” Wrestlemania matches, and one of them was Cena vs Bray Wyatt. Which I promptly dismissed because THAT is ridiculous, right? Wrong.

Bray Wyatt, that beautiful son of a bitch, cost Cena the match and beat Cena like he smacked his child. Which I loved. After a wonderful performance earlier in the night with Daniel Bryan (more on that later on), I think it’s high time for Bray to make his way into the main event spotlight. He’s got a great character, he’s convincing, and I consider him one of the best talkers of the past 10 years. He can go toe to toe with John Cena. The real question is how to approach a match of this caliber. Which is a totally different and longer article that I’ll be writing another day.

4) Brock Lesnar vs Big Show

Another match I wasn’t into. Thankfully, it was kept short. Big Show can be good at times, but I have not even the slightest inkling to see him wrestling Brock. Two big men colliding and struggling to hit finishing moves on each other isn’t very entertaining for me. Moving on.

5) The Rumble

SO MANY FEELINGS. But here’s the more pressing of my thoughts from the Rumble.

-I’m very sad Daniel wasn’t in it. The crowd wanted him, people and animals at home wanted him there, and I think he should’ve been in it. But he had a good match with Bray tonight, and I can accept the fact that him and Bray stole the show right from the beginning.

– The fact that Batista won the Rumble is complete horseshit. I’m pretty upset that he did win, quite frankly. But, I’m willing to do something shocking. I’m shelving my shock/anger and seeing where this story will take us. The internet is far too quick to be angry when something doesn’t go it’s way, and Wrestlemania is all about building to the big finale. It’ll be a slow build, but I have faith that the WWE will eventually tell an interesting story. I, however, have zero faith in Batista’s wrestling ability at this point, and would have rather seen Roman Reign’s win tonight.

– We all got our crazy Kofi elimination spot. Happy now?

– No NXT stars but Rusev get to be in the Rumble? Okay then.

6) Daniel Bryan vs Bray Wyatt

The match of the show. So many different feelings going on in this match. For something that didn’t have “build” or a “story” or whatever smarky words we like to use, it cannot be denied that this was a great match. Bryan can wrestle his ass off, and Bray was allowed to be more vicious than I can ever remember him being in a match. Bray needed to be this tonight. We all need to see the evil in this man, and we need to believe that he’s unpredictable. There were so many times I cringed, covered my eyes or yelled at my computer when a big hit came. Daniel being Sister Abigailed into the barricade was just flat out awesome. I had a good feeling from the beginning about the match, and my two favorite stars delivered. I don’t know how this worked so well, but it just did. Match of the night, year, century? We shall see.

Those are my quick thoughts on the show. What did you think of the Royal Rumble this year? Did it live up to your expectations or leave you wanting more?