the crib sheet

Well Graham, you deserve it, your 'shout out'. I have been working on this business for almost a year and these blogs for a little more than 6 months, and you keep saying, what about me? Don't I get a mention or at least a photo credit? He, kind readers, is the family photographer. He appears in very few family pictures (except when I am pregnant in which case I am mysteriously m.i.a. in pictures - for obvious and big reasons) and I always feel a little guilty when I down load them off of the camera. Our recent trip to Fire Island, you would think that I was some awesome single mom, he's nowhere to be found in photographic evidence.

This post is dedicated to the partners - the partners who do not have milk dripping, spraying, need I say more?, out of their bodies. Like sweet Graham who kept asking how can I help as I cried, post partum and swollen? Who endured my 'you do nothing' rants at the end of a long day; a day that he spent on endless, painful conference calls.

The past few months for me have been a wake up call. Partners deserve their name. I have met with a fair number of sleepless families, meeting dads and moms who want nothing more than to chip in and help. I have learned too over the past few months that I have been very busy that being a good partner can simply mean unloading the dishwasher or changing a gross diaper. I feel like I went into parenting with the belief that I would do a lot of work, and Graham better do his share. Should parenting be a punishment between partners? Sometimes that is what it might feel like. Isn't having an angry newly minted 5-year old stomp on your foot punishment enough; why do we need to extend the pain between ourselves?

In honor of my partner, Graham, I invite you nursing, often sleep deprived and tortured, mothers to think of ways your partner can be, well, you guessed it, a partner.

So what is my partner doing right now? He's at yoga leaving me to bathe all 3 kids and put them down for the night, post swim birthday party. Am I bitter, ummmmm, yes of course, but he did leave a crazy work day to swim with kids and serve chicken nuggets. Don't worry, it will even out, believe me.