Bumpin' in the Club Predicts a Better Grind

The nightclub bump and grind is the modern human’s mating ritual. We know that dancing imitates sex and, for the fortunate, precedes it, but one scientist has just introduced a theory that might surprise even the luckiest club kids: A woman’s ability to dance can predict how strong and pleasurable her orgasm is, and that in turn might make her a more appealing mate.

This is the bold conclusion put forth in a new article published in Socioaffective Neuroscience and Psychology, which explores the link between orgasm, female ovulation, and reproduction. The central idea, the brainchild of Northwestern University’s Adam Safron, Ph.D., is nothing new — scientists showed in 2015 that female orgasm used to be necessary for ejecting eggs — but a few logical leaps allowed him to take this thought even further and link it to the female orgasm. He outlined them in his hilariously named paper “What Is Orgasm? A Model of Sexual Trance and Climax Via Rhythmic Entrainment.”

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His train of thought makes a few stops: Dance is rhythmic, and so are the physical effects of an orgasm. Orgasms and female fertility have been shown to be closely linked. So, maybe the ability of a female to dance can predict her ability to have an orgasm — and, in turn, indicate how fertile she is.

His line of reasoning is informed by a long list of studies on sexual stimulation and introduces a way to bridge the gap represented by our lack of knowledge about orgasm mechanics. His hypothesis certainly makes some wild leaps, but the idea that both dance and sexual stimulation induce not only physically rhythmic movement but also some cyclical physiological feedback processes in the body is interesting. It’s especially compelling in light of his assertion that orgasm is the culmination of “deepening sensory absorption and trance” brought on by such rhythms.

In a way, Safron sees women’s winding hips, twerking butts, and undulating waists as a sort of hypnosis that parallels what’s going on in the body during sex and orgasm — one that can predict how good their orgasms can be. He goes on to suggest that different dance and sex partners might induce different rhythmic responses from an individual, so perhaps the partner who induces the best “orgasmic responding” from a woman is her ideal mate. The same reasoning doesn’t seem to apply to males because they don’t have eggs that require orgasms to pop out.

So, a woman who is especially good at dancing, according to Safron’s theory, probably has a great sex life. Not only are men more likely to be attracted to her, but her rhythmic know-how might indicate that she’s evolutionarily primed to have good orgasms — and the right mate might make them even better. Think about that the next time you get down on the dance floor: Your skills (or lack thereof) might predict more than just the night ahead.