Gay Gaddis on How to Kick Ass in Business

The CEO of one of the largest independent woman-owned advertising agencies in the country talks her first book, out this month

by Clarisa Ramirez

Published: January 4, 2018

photo courtesy of gay gaddis

As the founder and CEO of T3, Gay Gaddis has built one of the largest independent woman-owned advertising agencies in the country. On Jan. 23, she releases her first book, Cowgirl Power: How to Kick Ass in Business and Life, using lessons gleaned from real-life cowgirls and her modest upbringing in Liberty, Texas, to help women unlock their own inner power.

What is a badass cowgirl, and how did you come up with this philosophy?
When I started to write this book, it was more about ranch wisdom and how it parlayed in my business and decision-making. Then I went to the Cowgirl [Hall of Fame and] Museum in Fort Worth and was blown away. I had forgot about these amazing women who were tough and had competed with men and would win. I wanted to feature them as examples of their incredible showmanship, taking care of each other—and just a great example of how women, when the competitive gloves are on, are really good. I begin each chapter with a cowgirl. I matched their traits and lessons with the themes of the chapter, and that’s why they’re in there. I think they’re just fantastic examples to all of us.

You write about finding your inner power. Where does this power come from, and how can people use it to be successful in work and life?
You must become competent in something or some things. Find out what you’re not good at and leave it alone. Just let it go. Focus on what you do well and get really good at that. That leads to confidence when you speak up and you’re talking or on a team. When you’re confident, you have a little more opportunity to be assertive. You find these power moments along the way, and when they come along you need to understand them and why they came along, and you grab those. I want people to be empowered to do things that they thought they couldn’t do.

This whole thing that’s come up in the news with sexual harassment: Sometimes there’s nothing you can do to avoid that. You just tell them to go to hell and get out. But I sincerely believe that predators are always going to go for the weak and the vulnerable, and if you exude power and if you are confident and a little more headstrong, those predators are less likely to attack you. That’s why you’ve got to get your power game. And power is not top-down, authoritative power. Power comes from within. People can see it.

What makes a good leader?
You absolutely have to be the keeper of building trust among your team members. You’re going to try your damnedest to do the right thing. That’s part of the thing with harassment; if you don’t act on it quickly, you lose a lot of trust. Why would people want to work with you if they think you’re wrong? It’s rare, but I’ve had to fire clients because of abusive behavior. You gain the biggest trust from your team when you do. I have a theory; in the book, I talk about “shoot the assholes.” If you have a bad person in the organization, your organization surrounds it like a cancer. He’s like a bad spirit. You must get rid of him because it’s bad for the collective spirit—and everyone cheers and everyone is a refreshed.

What is the best advice for women on how to kick ass in business and in life?
One of the things I talk about in the book is building these buckets of goodwill: doing things beyond the job description, giving a hand to lift someone up. We get a lot out of helping other people, and when you do these things they stretch. You don’t see the immediate results, but they pay off later. Just don’t expect that…It’s about building relationships over time. Once you have those relationships, it’s amazing what can open up later—and maybe you have something to give back. One thing I think men are generally better at is the concept of reciprocity: “If I open this door for you, maybe you’ll get me into this golf club.” Women are sometimes afraid to ask for that stuff. I’m pretty good at that now, but I wasn’t always.

There’s a section in the book about making a life timeline you call a “Treasure Map.” How can people make one?
This is really important concept, especially for younger women and young families. This is what you do: Write down your goals and aspirations. Put in as much as you possibly can, and map it out. A lot of young moms live in the moment. I encourage women to somehow stay in the game—if they want. Volunteer, freelance, or do something to keep your skills up. When you’re looking down the barrel when your kids are going to college, what are you going to do? It’s very hard, if not impossible, to get back in the job force. You don’t have to gun to be CEO or C-suite, but when the time comes, you can rev it up. This is what the book is about: I want you to have options in your life.

My husband and I did this. I planned to change from [T3] being a regional to a national team when our kids went to college. I wanted to try to find clients outside of the region and find speaking engagements. [Our youngest child] Sam will be 33, so when he was 18 that’s when T3 took off. This company changed dramatically after that. Before, I wanted to work with clients where I could get in and out in a day and be home in the morning when the kids went to school. It was a conscious timeline decision.

You juggled raising three kids, running a business, and networking —but you mention in the book that it was often challenging. What’s the secret from preventing burnout?
That’s where I think a lot of this personal power stuff comes from; it’s inside you. It’s going to push you along when you didn’t think you had another inch to go. Another thing I’ve been fortunate to do is go back to the country. Whether it was going back to Liberty and being on my godfather’s farm, or my husband’s family ranch in South Texas, that’s where I would get grounded. If it’s just a weekend or a few hours, break away from the madness. Go to the country, observe nature, and enjoy just breathing the outdoor air and getting out of the chaos. That has been my salvation all my life. Even if you don’t have a ranch to go to, you can certainly go outside. Go to a park, lie down, take a peanut butter sandwich, and just be.

What do successful people do every day?
Thank the people who are helping you or did a deed of kindness. Have a spirit of thankfulness. My mom used to say this: “If you love someone, you go tell them right now.” If you feel that way, you don’t wait.