Monthly Archives: June 2015

The mysterious UFO that was spotted on NASA’s space camera has been identified as the Flambards plane.

The UFO was caught on NASA’s space camera earlier this year. The NASA version of the film cuts out after 2 seconds, just as the UFO appears on screen.

Tony Trevaskis of Trenere Estate Penzance, sent the Cornish News an unedited version of the film, taken from a different angle.

We were shocked to find, that the UFO, which was originally thought to be aliens from another planet, was, in fact, the Flambards plane that is often seen flying over towns and beaches in Cornwall, during the summer.

spotted on the Trago Webcam from outer space

Tony Trevaskis said, “I couldn’t bleddy believe it, I was having a mooch online at the Trago Webcam from outer space! I thought, “av a look at that!” After a couple minutes, I saw that bleddy plane, that flies over Portreath beach with the Flambards banner on it! I thought “Shit the bed, that plane gets everywhere!” I always wondered where that thing went after it flew over Portreath. Because you don’t see it fly back the other way! It must fly over the beach then go up into space! Matey flying that must have some balls on him to do that!”

It’s not been officially identified as the Flambards plane, but looking at the pictures, you can see for yourself!

Have you spotted a UFO lately? If so, please tell us on the Cornish News Facebook page!

The hot weather could spell disaster for Cornwall’s pasty trees this summer.

The heatwave, which is expected to last another 6 weeks could wipe out the last remaining trees, situated near the Lizard.

Patsy Rowe from Helston said, “It’s some bleddy hot at the moment. Our orchard is really suffering! All the large steak are gone now. All we’ve got left are; a few mediums, a chicken and veg and a sausage roll! If they all go, I’m not sure what we’ll do?”

For many years, the trees were the main source of food in Cornwall and miners would pick the fruits on the way to work.

Over the years, bakeries have cashed in on the luscious dish and are slowly wiping the trees out!

Patsy continued, “I blame the bakeries. They tricked everyone into thinking you could only make pasties in a kitchen. This isn’t true and now, we’re all suffering! It’s some sad, I tell e’!”

The last few remaining trees can be found at Patsy’s orchard, near Ann’s Pasty Shop, in the Lizard. The orchard isn’t open to the public, but if nobody is around and you can climb the hedge, you might be able to pinch one for your dinner!

The pasty tree, can also be found growing in the wild and have even been seen in Tehidy Woods.

If you spot one, please contact the Cornish News team via their Facebook page.

You might think this is an easy question to answer, and you might think your answer would depend on if you are Cornish or not, and if you think that then you are mistaken!

If you drill down into any attitude survey in recent years done in Cornwall and about Cornish identity, you find a remarkably consistent statistic. About 20% of people are vehemently anti-Cornish, 30% are just as vehemently pro-Cornish while the remaining 50% are mildly pro-Cornish. This division of people in Cornwall occurs in surveys by Cornwall Council as well as other bodies, and appears too often to be dismissed. I would say this is a good reflection of attitudes in Cornwall towards Cornish identity.

When you look at the people in these surveys it goes a bit odd though; 75% of people who say they are Cornish are pro-Cornish, but up to 25% of “Cornish” people are not! These nay-sayers have become known as the “Plastic Cornish”. They claim to be “Cornish + Proud” and are willing to argue the toss over pasty crimping and cream teas till the cows come home, but they are intent on turning Cornwall into little England. These “Plastic Cornish” tend to vote tory, or in extreme cases even UKIP (whose councillors regularly vote against Cornish culture in Cornwall council) and they are keen to see Cornish culture disappear. They seem to see Cornwall as an (inferior) English county; and take every opportunity to denigrate our status within the UK.

True Cornish people know that although we are governed as if we were a county, our status is legally that of a Duchy; extra-terrestrial to the crown. Charles, Duke of Cornwall, only directly owns about 2% of Cornwall, but he legally owns the “fundus” of the entire territory of Cornwall; which means if you die without leaving a will, it goes to Charles and not the state. For all of the legal jargon, you can read the written works of Cornwall’s Stannary Parliament, John Angarrack and more. In fact, take a moment to look at this https://www.celticleague.net/kernow/useful-information-for-the-people-of-cornwall/

Among non-Cornish people living in Cornwall there is about a 50/50 split between those who want more Cornish culture, and those who want less. And why not? Those who come here and want to celebrate our culture are most welcome, and those who are not may just not know about it! Of course, the Campaign to Eradicate Cornwall (CEC) is intent on diluting us Cornish by swamping us with 47,000 extra houses for more people to come and make the Cornish minority even more minor, in our own country. However, better an honest enemy than a false friend, and those who are so vociferous against Cornish language, culture, history and identity include far too many “Plastic Cornish”. They hate being reminded that the issues we face (Kernow concreted by upcountry developers, net loss of £300million per year paid to Westminster coffers, infrastructure decay and council cuts, all resulting in more poverty and violence) are a direct result of their own voting choices.

Save us from the “Plastic Cornish”!
Useful Information For the People Of Cornwall « The Celtic League
2013 – The Duchy of Cornwall – A Feudal Remnant? An Examination of the origin, evolution and present status of the Duchy of Cornwall, PhD thesis by John Kirkhopehttp://www.celticleague.net

Myghal Map Serpren Bio Myghal lives in Resrudh, Kernow and regularly contributes articles and poetry written in Cornish, English and Castellano to several magazines.

He serves as an independent local councillor and is a member of several Cornish and Celtic committees and organisations as well as of the Order of Bards Ovates and Druids.

Pengeggon Roofing Company have started the construction of the Cornish Stadium today, in a field, next to Pool Market!

The stadium, which was promised by the Prime Minister, as a thank you for voting for him, will hold 20,000 people! Speaking from his holiday caravan at St. Ives holiday park, the prime minister said, “I said to the people of Cornwall ‘If you vote for me, I will build a stadium! You voted for me and as promised, here is the stadium!”

Tony Tresidder from Camborne, Redruth and Pool, also known as C.R.A.P. was very pleased, he said, “Well, I can’t bleddy believe it! First Heartlands, then Subway, then Barny’s Pasties, now… a stadium. Pool really is the future! I will be honest, I was happy with Pool Market, I use to go every Saturday and Sunday and Bank Holidays. We use to go for a “Burger U Like!” Then have a yap with Mike on the tool stand, then finish it off with a mooch round the car boot. Now, I go down Barny’s for a Pasty, then up Pool Market! But soon, I’ll be able to go stadium as well! I hope they have a doughnut stand or something, or an arcade, that really would be the icing on the cake!”

The new stadium is thought to only cost £10,000 to build, as contractors, Pengeggon Roofing, took on the work as a favour to the government! Roofing owner, Graham Rogers, from Troon, said, “Well, we’re doing the job for a favour. We don’t want any wages or anything, it’s good advertising doing the job! We’ve never done anything this big! We normally do odd jobs and a bit of roofing, every now and then! Mark, who works for me, his cousins mate knows someone who built Wembley stadium, so we know what we’re doing! I reckon it won’t take long.”

In order for the stadium to fit in with Cornish culture, it will be “Pasty shaped,” with an opening and closing roof! When the roof is open, the pasty stadium will be side crimped. When it’s raining and the roof closed, it will be top crimped. The pasty shaped stadium will be seen from outer space!

Not everyone is happy with the pasty shaped stadium. Margret Margretson of Park Bottom, near Redruth, said, “I quite like the pasty stadium being side crimped, but top? Top crimped is illegal, it gives off the wrong message! What next? A carrot shaped car park? I won’t ever step foot in Pool, ever again!”

The stadium will also have a number of business outlets, selling stuff that nobody wants. There will also be a number of shops, that will probably never have anything in them and if they do, the only interest from the public, will be when they are mentioned in conversations like;

Cornish man A “Ere, been up that stadium yet av’ e?”
Cornish man B ” Yeah, seen that bleddy shop that sells all they toys ‘av e?”
Cornish man A “IT’S CLOSED!”
Cornish man B “Is it? I was saying to the misses, it would! Bleddy £10 for a small teddy! Too expensive!”
Cornish man A “I knaw, bleddy ridiculous!”

It is not sure when the stadium will be built, as every time we asked Pengeggon Roofing, they replied “I don’t reckon it will take too long. Well, as long as we don’t get any problems!”

When the stadium is finally built, it will be holding an opening concert, starring local tribute cabaret singer, Gary Manilow and head DJ of Pasty FM, Brian Polmear. There will also be half price pasties from Corner to Corner Pasty shop.

The new Mebyon Kernow candidate for Falmouth, Ayesha Wilson, gives us an insight into the Anti Austerity March, that took place last Saturday, 20th June, in London.

“As we set off at 04h20-ish Saturday morning and having not slept a wink at all the previous evening, I had no idea of what to expect from my venture to London.

Ayesha with Anne K Kennedy Truscott

Here I was, one of many, off to represent our beloved Cornwall in a mass anti-austerity demonstration, armed with my St. Piran’s flag attached to a clothes prop! I felt like I was going into battle, a battle to get our voice heard.

As our little patriotic bunch, erupted into chants of “Oggy Oggy Oggy!!” whilst joining up with the other blocs, I felt an enormous sense of pride and elation amongst the sea of black and white engulfing me.

Bank of England, City of London

The Cornish were here, we will not be forgotten, nor will we be held prisoner by the chains of Westminster. We were making ourselves heard. Along with 1/4 million other voices who were outraged and angered about the devastating effects the Tory rule was having on ordinary people.

Zoe Fox

I saw disabled people, elderly people, children, black, white, Asian people, each with their own story written on their faces.

We were representative of the 64% who did not agree to Tory devastation sweeping across the UK via an outdated, unfair voting system.

After the lengthy March As we gathered opposite Westminster abbey, listening to the various speeches, I felt an enormous sense of achievement that I can’t express into words.

The Cornish had come to London, just like Michael Joseph An Gof and Thomas Flamank from St Keverne in 1497. It was a true privilege for me to represent you Kernow, I am honoured to have been given the opportunity.”

Michael Joseph An Gof and Thomas Flamank statue at St. Kevern

Ayesha finished “I’m South African born, British father, South African mother, emigrated to Britain when I was 17. I have a keen interest in nature and the environment and the future of our planet. I became interested in politics after moving to Cornwall and learning about Cornish history and the effects an Anglo-led government was having on her future. I am currently a Mebyon Kernow candidate in the Falmouth by election for the Penwerris ward.”

by Steve Heller Today I took a trip to Cornwall’s Hollywood, AKA Portreath, to try a Portreath Bakery pasty. I had read a story in the West Briton, about Portreath Bakery opening a “Drive Through” Pasty Shop or “Drive By” as I like to call it. In the past, I’ve not been a fan of their Pasties and the last time I tried one was february 2014, when we had the storms that wrecked Portreath Pier! On my Facebook yesterday I posted a comment, saying I wasn’t a fan of their pasties and after a string of comments and likes, I thought it wasn’t fair to judge the pasty from a year ago! So today, my wonderful wife Gemma, my son Ethan and me headed down to check them out!

My wife went into the bakery to buy me a medium steak! On her return, she commented on how gross the harbour smelt! If you know Portreath, you know that the harbour smells eggy, like someone has done a massive fart!

The pasty was in a nice branded bag, hot like it was straight out the oven.

When I opened the bag, my first impression was, the pastry hasn’t changed from the last time I tried it! A thin shortcrust pastry. So thin and glazed, it had a sponge like texture. The crimp was very thin, which I like, but it was a bit raw on one spot! I thought, this maybe because the pasties were too close together when they were baked off!

edge of the pasty a bit raw

I bit into my oggy and was pleasantly surprised! It tasted fresh, warm and like a decent pasty! The veg was chipped and not diced, which gave it a homemade feel. The thin pastry and the small crimp, did give it slightly more innards, when comparing the “Innards to Pastry Ratio” The seasoning had plenty of salt, but it did seem to lack pepper! Personally, I like my pasty ‘ot and peppery. The lack of pepper wasn’t the end of the world and I know a lot of people who prefer it that way!

Nice and tasty, with chipped veg

I’m not going to lie, it was nice! So nice, I started smashing the pasty and eating it like i’ve never eaten before! My wife Gemma, who isn’t a huge pasty fan, asked to try a piece, before I accidentally bit my fingers off. She liked it too! My thoughts were “This pasty shop has definitely upped its game from over a year ago, when I last tried it!”

One thing that was on my mind though – the meat! As you know, in shop pasties, there’s nothing worse than eating a pasty containing one big lump of meat in the middle! This gives the impression that, whoever made the pasty didn’t show their love and affection for the dish and that makes me sad. 😦

tasty meat, sadly in one lump…

The first 3 bites were veg. Then on the 4th, I got to the meat! Sadly, the meat was in a bit of a lump. It did taste nice, fresh and not tinged with that sourness that I’ve experienced with other pasties. The lump was sat on the opposite side of the crimp, like someone had just slapped it in there, without the love it deserved! It spoilt the moment. One minute i’m in heaven and in an instant, I’ve turned into your stereotypical moaning Cornishman! Such a shame!

I bit through the middle of the pasty and was expecting all the meat to disappear. But to my surprise, the lump continued right through to the end, like a vein of tin down Crofty Mine!

Looking at the innards, you could see meat one side and veg the other and not spread evenly throughout! I was still holding onto the fact that it was a hot, fresh and really really tasty! Bleddy ansome!

Getting to the end of the pasty now and we were in gravy territory… The pasty didn’t have as much gravy as I was hoping! The whole pasty wasn’t dry, it was moist, from top to bottom, but it had the same slightly moist consistency throughout and no gravy. A few weeks ago, I tried a West End Pasty and that was oozing with gravy, to the point that, as I was eating it, I was making erotic noises the whole time! Gravy would have made this Portreath pasty, as the taste was so good! Overall, I would say this pasty is an average shop pasty and has improved in the last year! It has a nice chipped veg, holds a tasty flavor, with a light pastry and crimp. It’s a reasonable price. However, the distribution of meat and veg is not for me! I like an even distribution of meat throughout the pasty, from corner to corner. It also lacked pepper and gravy for my liking! But remember, these are only my opinions and for what it’s worth, I could see some people rating this pasty as their number 1!

Would I buy it again – Yes. I think it will do really well as a drive through pasty. If you compare its price to other drive by foods, it’s an absolute bargain and tastes really good! I’d sooner have a drive by pasty than a Mc Donalds or KFC any day!

A Camborne man was in hospital last night after an accident left him hanging by his scrotum.

Harry Sack, who lives in Fore Street, Camborne was out walking his dog at the Queen Matilda mine in Camborne, when the accident happened.

Mark Knight who was at the scene, said “I was out taking my Jack Russell, Freddy out for a walk. Freddy is a lovely dog. Had him for 6 years now, since a puppy! We got him off James Jackson from up Mount Ambrose! Knaw him do ‘e? James is some boy, breeds all types of dogs and cats. Can be a bit expensive though, but he done me a favour and I got Freddy for cheap, because I done a bit of work for James a couple of years ago! I fitted his new kitchen for him! Done a lovely job I did. He bought all the materials and I fitted it! Wasn’t bad really, because James brother Michael, who I sometimes play darts with down the Oxford, you MUST know Michael! Tall, about 5ft6 dark hair and talks out the side of his mouth!? Anyway, we were both down James house and Michael asked if I knew how to do plumbing, because his toilet was leaking. Well, I can do all sorts really; plumbing, carpentry, building and a bit of electrical work! So, Michael had me fix his toilet and I made a bit of money from that! Cash in hand of course, but don’t tell anyone! So there you go! Anyway, what the bleddy hell was I going on about? Um… I forgot now! Chroist, what am I like! That’s it… I was walking past the engine house, on Queen Matilda mine and when I looked up, Harry was dangling by his balls!”

When Mark saw Harry, he rushed over and tried to help, Mark added “I rushed over and didn’t really know what to do. Harry was flapping his arms and screaming “Help! Help!” So I shouted “How the hell did you do that!” It was funny really, seeing him panicking like that! I went and got a big stick and I pushed him up in the air, just enough to release his ball bag from the rusty bar that he was stuck to! Harry hit the floor like a sack of spuds!”

Harry was taken by air ambulance to Tuckingmill Hospital where he remains in a stable condition!

It is thought the accident happened when Harry needed a wee and tried to wee off an engine house! It is believed the wind blew him and unfortunately he caught on a rusty metal bar!

Police have issued a warning, they said “Mine sites can be very dangerous!”