Chronology of Chemical Weapons Threats, Attack, and an Abundance of Orwellian Propaganda, Courtesy of O! Brave New World

8 December 2012. Fake Syrians army scum* release video demonstrating the killing of rabbits via chemical weapon that looks like VX, in threat against the Syrian population. Dr. Bashar al-Ja’afari, Permanent Representative of Syria, to the United Nations, suggests it was made in a Turkish lab. The video shows containers of chemical weapons (CW) manufactured by the Turkish company, Tekkim.

2 January 2013. Turkish Andadolu Agency interviews Bassam al-Dada, fsa scum political analyst, who reports that they have ability to make and use CWs.

20 March 2013. Syrian government petitions the U.N. to launch an investigation into the use of chemical weapons against the civilian population of Khan al-Assal.

23 March 2013. Antecedents** F/UK set precedent by demanding investigation of CW use in Syria, a country that is neither France nor Britain, and therefore does not have the legal authority to make such a demand.

26 March 2013. Ban names Sellstrom to head all CW investigation.

23 April 2013. Israeli Brigadier General Itai Brun is first to use “s” word at press briefing, claiming that Syria has used it against Syria. Though he offered no evidence, echolalia among the west’s yellow urinals was immediate.

24 April 2013. NYT yellow urinalist Sanger writes as though being paid by the word, that Israel has proof Syria used CW.

24 April 2013. NYT yellow urinalist Sanger — apparently rushing from his keyboard to his Skype account — subsequently whines to CNN yellow urinalist Amanpour that Brun offered no evidence at his press briefing: “He did not give us a sense of what direct evidence they had.”

25 April 2013. Undeterred by NYT yellow urinalist Sanger’s lamentations, CNN yellow urinalist Amanpour interviews fsa scum who claims that Syria has been using CW against Syria in various parts of Syria.

29 April 2013 CNN yellow urinalist Amanpour interviews alleged Syrian physician scum who claims that Syria has been using CW against Syria in various parts of Syria. He claims: Four people died. Then three members of one family, including a toddler, a child, a mommy, died. Four samples from dead corpses were sent to Turkey. Yellow urinalist Amanpour shows video of people with cans of shaving cream on their faces, while lying on litters, as uncorroborated, corroborating, evidence. Alleged doctor says “Ministry of Defense also confirmed that this is probably a chemical attack.” Who cares that U.S. does not have a “Ministry of Defense”?

6 May 2013. U.N. Human rites investigator del Ponte does impressive imitation of Brun, in interview with Radiotelevisione svizzera — though not known if with the radio or the television portion, and reported initially by France 24 — by using “s” word but saying it was used by fsa scum. Claims to have no evidence. Her remarks give all yellow urinalism venues the opportunity to report that Syria has used CWs against Syria, a whole lot of times, in various parts of Syria.

27 May 2013. F/UK yellow urinals Le Merde and The Guardian…of Hell, Geryon, give doppelganger reports that Syria has been using CWs against Syria, in various parts of Syria, using the “s” word. The French Foreign Minister is so impressed with these reports that he holds a press conference and announces a red line has been crossed because nothing has been verified.

4 June 2013. According to Paulo Pinheiro, chair of the U.N. Commission of Inquiry, reports that the U.N. human rites investigators reported that “limited quantities” of unknown CWs, unknown means of dispersal, unknown perpetrators, except that Syria has used CWs against Syria in various parts of Syria, and oh, yeah, the fsa scum did too! This must be magically divined, as at this time, now Despite not having begun the investigation requested by the Syrian government, into the chemical weapons attack against Khan al – Assal, now 86 (eighty – six) days ago.

*”scum” is both singular and plural. I use it to honor the memory of the martyred Sheikh al-Bouti, who used this term (though I personally believe actual scum may find it insulting).

**In jurisprudence, “an antecedent cannot be part of the jury.” — Dr. Bashar al-Ja’afari, at his U.N. press briefing, 30 April 2013 (France tested its first nuclear weapon on persons in the Algerian desert. Britain dropped mustard gas on Iraqi tribes who resisted British colonialism.).

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