Hillary Clinton Announces Past Sex Change, Gains Popularity

In a bold move that stunned her supporters and dismayed her advisors, Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton has revealed to the world that she used to be a man.

Clinton went against her chief campaign advisors, all of whom told her that such an announcement would be political suicide. Early on Super Tuesday, Clinton revealed to the public the shocking news.

"I was actually born a man," Clinton said in a press conference in New York early on Tuesday morning before flying to other cities for last minute campaigning.

Many voters were shocked initially, but after thinking, realized that it made sense.

"At first, I was stunned, but then, after weighing all the facts, I could see it," said Rodney Williamson, a rabid Hillary supporter. "I'm still gonna vote for her, I mean him."

Although her advisors thought that this move would rapidly diminish her popularity, Super Tuesday exit polls suggest quite the contrary.

"Hell yeah, I'll vote for him," said Missouri resident Rex Thompson. "A man's a man, and that's what we need to run this country. I woke up this morning thinking I was gonna vote for McCain, but once I heard the news, I jumped on the Hillary bandwagon."

Hillary has lost some of her feminist supporters, but she has gained a great deal of the transsexual, transgendered, and hick populations.

"I wasn't gonna vote for no woman or no minority, but now that I know Hillary is a man, or at least used to be one, I can vote for her," stated an enthusiastic but anonymous new Clinton supporter.

Although the results from Super Tuesday are not yet official, it appears that Clinton will soundly defeat Obama in virtually all of the states.

In a press conference, husband Bill Clinton commented, "I've always supported my wife, and I hope this clears up some of the events from my own presidency."

Hillary emphasized that her manhood would not in any way impact any of her beliefs. "I want to show people that gender doesn't matter. That's why I am running. That's why I became a woman."

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