Sunday, October 23, 2016

Evaluating the Evil Overlord list, 71 - 80

71. If I decide to test a lieutenant's loyalty and see if he/she should be made a trusted lieutenant, I will have a crack squad of marksmen standing by in case the answer is no.

Evaluation: Prudent.

72. If all the heroes are standing together around a strange device and begin to taunt me, I will pull out a conventional weapon instead of using my unstoppable superweapon on them.

Evaluation: Prudent.

73. I will not agree to let the heroes go free if they win a rigged contest, even though my advisors assure me it is impossible for them to win.

Evaluation: Prudent.

74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details, I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.

Evaluation: Prudent. You’re boring but practical today, my liege.

75. I will instruct my Legions of Terror to attack the hero en masse, instead of standing around waiting while members break off and attack one or two at a time.

Evaluation: Like Stormtrooper marksmanship, this one is somewhat discredited. It was never all that prevalent, and when it did happen, it was generally because the hero used the environment to force the goons to come at him in small groups.

76. If the hero runs up to my roof, I will not run up after him and struggle with him in an attempt to push him over the edge. I will also not engage him at the edge of a cliff. (In the middle of a rope-bridge over a river of molten lava is not even worth considering.)

Evaluation: Prudent.

77. If I have a fit of temporary insanity and decide to give the hero the chance to reject a job as my trusted lieutenant, I will retain enough sanity to wait until my current trusted lieutenant is out of earshot before making the offer.

Evaluation: Prudent.

78. I will not tell my Legions of Terror "And he must be taken alive!" The command will be "And try to take him alive if it is reasonably practical."

Evaluation: It depends how much he’s worth you.

79. If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as it has been employed it will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.

Evaluation: It took me a couple reads to figure this one out. I think the meaning of “it” changes, and what he means is “If my doomsday device happens to come with a reverse switch, as soon as [the doomsday device] has been employed [the reverse switch] will be melted down and made into limited-edition commemorative coins.

I do like a good commemorative coin, but it’s not hard to imagine a scenario where one would want to use a reverse switch.

80. If my weakest troops fail to eliminate a hero, I will send out my best troops instead of wasting time with progressively stronger ones as he gets closer and closer to my fortress.