I’ve been hard on Florida these past several days, and I acknowledge that my judging the Land of the Disco Loudout’s similar to shitting on Nashville having only shot Jägermeister on Broadway. There has to be more to this place than poisonous nocturnal animals, vicious retirees, and brown note inducing throb courtesy of DJ Chad McAsshole. If there’re any native Floridians reading this, please send recommendations, sincerely - I need my relationship with our 27th state readjusted.