Saturday, April 10, 2010

Prepare yourselves... I am in a mood and will probably piss a lot of people off. :)

I want to start by saying that I am aware of the fact that I am not a pregnant woman, and have never experienced what it is like to be pregnant. However, what I've heard/read/seen lately makes me feel that I need to express my true feelings about this very issue.

Steve and I have been trying to conceive for years. Not days... weeks...months... but literally YEARS. That's a long time to pray and cry and pray and cry and ask what is wrong with me that I can't get pregnant. So, it's a bit of a touchy subject for me anyway.

I have many friends who were all right there with me as someone having fertility issues. Seriously... I won't name names, but I have two friends that I work with, and they both were experiencing the agony of not being able to get pregnant. Then there are my friends... okay, I'm going to count the number of friends that I have who have had the problem of getting pregnant. There are five. YES I said FIVE.

Guess what folks? Of all the seven... ALL OF THEM are now pregnant or just had a baby. ALL OF THEM. I honestly do not have ANYONE that I can say is in the same boat as me. So whatever... that's not my rant (today).

My rant is this. I absolutely HATE and I will say it again, HATE when my friends, who struggled through infertility as I have, who are now pregnant (let me remind you again that they are PREGNANT) bitch and complain about being pregnant. If I hear one more of them bitch about "Only X more months and I'm done with this..." I am going to scream.

I want to go off on them and say, "DO YOU NOT REMEMBER HOW YOU LONGED TO BE PREGNANT??? HAVE YOUR FORGOTTEN WHAT IT'S LIKE TO WISH TO GET PREGNANT AND KNOW THAT YOU'RE ABLE TO BRING A LIFE INTO THIS WORLD????" Yes, I am writing in all caps for a reason.

It blows my mind when I read blogs and Facebook updates about how miserable these friends are. I can't handle the bitching (in person) about how they can't wait to get the baby out and be done with all the pregnancy drama. Really? Are you kidding me?

Bitch to other friends... complain to someone else... but please be mindful that you're bitching and complaining to someone who would do just about anything, give just about anything, and aches at the inability to get pregnant. It's heart-wrenching for me to listen to all these people (who were in my shoes) complain about the miracle that they have inside of them.

Now, I said it at the beginning, I have never been pregnant. Maybe there's something that happens that really does make it a pain in the ass to be pregnant. I'll give you that, but please don't share your bitterness with someone who can't get pregnant. It's insulting and cruel.

While we are moving forward with our lives, and we're the process of adopting an infant, I still long for the day when I could have the joy of being pregnant. It's a long shot, and maybe I'll be that "one friend" who despite all effort, couldn't get pregnant. Which in reality, all the other seven friends apparently are not infertile are they? Not if they're pregnant now or just had a baby!

So to the pregnant women out there... please be mindful of your bitching and complaing and be thankful that you were able to get pregnant and that the person you're bitching to, would gladly trade places with you!!

I'm done... (for now). And if I offended anyone, now you know how it feels.

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I'm Cathy and I'm a former elementary teacher turned SAHM. This blog has grown and evolved through the years to be my sounding board, then a place to share my thoughts, fears, and celebrations, and then where I post pictures and practice my photography skills. I blog about daily happenings. To read more about my family and how we're connected to open adoption, please follow our family blog: A Completed Family.