The yelp you just heard was caused by, in your daze of self-glorification, your treading upon your pet's tail. Crouch down, apologise and try to ignore the thump of pet-guilt that just wrapped its legs around your shoulders.

Really try. It's harder than you'd think. Try not to feel the laser beams penetrating the back of your neck.

4. If you're working on a first draft do not go back and reread everything you've written before you start today's writing.

This is a no-win scenario. You like it and you've lost an hour to imagining which yummy movie stars are going to be clamouring to play your characters and starting to compose your acceptance speeches for both the Booker and the Oscar. You don't like it and the temptation to just stop writing and pursue that career as a welder may become overwhelming.

3. Is there a dragon or other cuddly monster in your manuscript?

Your main character noticing a poster with one on it as he/she is walking past a bookstore counts.

Elspeth Antonelli is an author and playwright. Her twelve murder mystery games and two plays are available through host-party.com. She has also contributed articles to the European writers' magazine "Elias". Her blog, "It's A Mystery," explores the writing process with a touch of humor. She is on Twitter as @elspethwrites.

Hmmm. Sounds like someone has been spying on me when I write. Except I have several pets, a few of whom sit on my desk and occasionally have to be brushed off the keyboard. Or the keyboard brushed off after they've sat on it.

Elspeth has been spying on me again, except I'm getting the baleful pet stare because I trimmed the sharp tips off Katie's front claws this morning. Now she slides off the chairs (and my pant legs) and can't cling.

Elspeth, since you announced on your blog that you were not feeling well this morning, I baby-sat this one for you. Fixed the typo and added your bio. Glad to see you are feeling better and able to say howdy here.

If you feel you need to use an exclamation point, you haven’t written a good line of dialogue or a creative scene. Incorporate the excitement in what you put on paper, not with punctuation symbols (and don’t write another vampire story).

Love the ones about the pet! I have a mastiff that thinks she is a lap dog every time I sit down to write. I typically having a shoving match with her... I win but not after I am fully exhausted... Did I mention she will try and but my lap top shut?