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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Sometimes you want your cake to match your party invitations. Hey, no biggie, right? I mean, bakers do this all the time! So, just bring in the invite...

[Picture removed]

...and then watch the magic happen.

(Photo removed at the request of the baker. Please enjoy this lovely picture of Epcot)

Mmmm. Magic.

And you must admit: no body makes it better.

Or say you have a specific item you want replicated in cake.

You know, like a camcorder.

(Really?)

(Oh. Ok. Really.)

Well, no problem. They can do that, too!

That's one for the record books.

And with all the company picnics out there, you know bakers can freehand logos like nobody's business:

See? Just like nobody's business!

Or how about trying an entire building?

It's all in the airbrush.

Enough business, though. What do you say we loosen things up with something a little... sexy?

Mrow.

Uh...

Well, on the bright side, at least the baker was generous with the serving sizes!

Because anything less would have been a waist.

Thanks to Anony M., Hannah I., Emily C., Bridey, & another Anony. And hey, you know what they say! "A moment with these hips on your lips, and your hips...I mean, your LIPS...no. Wait. Look. There's an old saying in Tennessee. Or was it Taiwan? Anyway. Fool me once, shame on..uh...look, you can't get fooled again, is what I'm saying. Sooo. Yeah.

I really fail to understand the continuing popularity of the pregnant torso cakes. I mean, I see them all over this site, and more keep coming, which means that bakers keep baking 'em, which means that people ordered them. I don't get it. I just don't get it.

I think your normal wreckiness has finally begun to effect me. I found myself thinking "Well, this one's not all that bad," which it clearly is! But I've been wreck-desensitized! It's madness, I say!! :)

1.: "A PEARL IN THE MAKING"??? That cake looks like someone who has terrible idigestion from eating oyster SHELLS. OY(ster)vey!2.: The *camcorder* resembles something I've seen on the evening news from the reporters in Afghanistan. What are they called, now? Tanks? 3.: 39 million pounds. (+!!!) A stripey heart and a funny-looking leaf thingy. Well. Who WOULDN'T know what it's referring to, I ask you.4.: Let's play fair, okay? the photo is at street level. The wrecklica is from above, like it was photographed from a helo. Of COURSE it will look different--the colors, the shape...the prehistorically giant foliage in the background...picky, picky, picky!5.: "What do you say we loosen things up..." you ask?Seemingly, they did just that; the cake's, er, "hips" are about as loosey-goosey as a roasting turkey. SEX-EE. (GrrrrOW!)Love the amputated look there, too.(Nothin' says lovin' like somethin' from the...guillotine? Axe murderer?) I fold--no deal. =^-.-^=

Dear [deity], if I didn't know you were sticklers to the pro thing I'd assume those were all amateur jobs for sure. I am still stunned at the hubris of so many people saying, "Sure, I can make that, if you pay me!" and then turn out such junk.

I too must be developing a high tolerance of the ridiculous with cake. Initially, with that first cake,I thought aside from Kermit getting handsy, it wasn't that bad.. then I looked at it again.. yeesh

I am a bit bothered by pregnancy = "a pearl in the making". Mostly as pearls are made by the oyster coating a small piece of debris to make the pearl. So, the fetus is a piece of debris...? Depending on your point of view..this is oddly appropriate.

That... Wow. I understand that it's hard to make cake out of certain things (if you're not on that show), but if you know you're not great at it, why not tell your customer? I know if I were pregnant and full of hormones, that cake would make me cry!Ava

As an employee of the San Francisco Food Bank, I feel like some clarification might help here. This cake was from our end-of-year party last June and 39 million pounds represents the amount of food we distributed in San Francisco during the year. Out of context, it makes very little sense at all, but we're pretty proud of what we do. And for the record, the general consensus that day was that this cake was a perfect candidate for CakeWrecks. :)

#4 E for effort. I mean, someone who had no idea what the original building looked like (apart from the wreckerator, that is) would probably be pleased. The arbitrary rearrangement of the landscaping shows creativity. Or a limited selection of flotsam. (Are those trees sanitary?)

#5 MarLeen should never have ordered a cake from the bakery owned by her arch-rival.

Haha SERIOUS, re: camera "look alike" cake: What is it? WHAT IS IT! Do you think that it might single-handedly take over the world? Maybe? It looks like a robot that comes alive at night, or something...

That company logo...there's a simple way to get the exact design you want. Basically, you trace it onto wax paper with piping gel and transfer it to the cake. I learned it at the elite culinary institute of Wilton Cake Decorating. Week two.

Also, I kind of did a double-take on the first cake because I assumed it was going to be a wedding invitation...but then she was pregnant. It took me a second to realize it was a baby shower invite. xD

The first cake would have been a Wreck no matter how it was done thanks to that ugly invitation so I really can't place all the blame on the decorator. I've always thought pastel pink and pastel green made a nauseating color-combination, and the headless pregnant torso with black gloves does nothing to flatter it.

I don't do blogs bc its a waste of time, but I had to comment after someone told me they saw this. First of all I don't think anything is wrong with the first cake and secondly that cake was created 2 years ago for the person who says why to people keep creating these cakes. The person who sent this picture did so to be malicious and petty. And futhermore I was pleased with the cake and at the end of the day that is all that matters! and it tasted great. So to each its own and we all have a own opinions and like they say opinions are like ..... I don't have to finish the rest.

My husband would say that the building cake is the difference between what an architect sees (the actual building) and what happens after the developers and contractors get their hands on it (the cake).

FYI for all u ignorant people pink and green are colors of the first And biggest African American Sorority. Pearls are known for scared reason within this sorority. And phrase Pearl in the making has something to do with an unborn child developing into a pearl so dont make fund of something u all know nothing about. And that was done without Fondant Which that is what the buyer requested. So that cake had a deeper meaning than just a pregnant lady on a cake. And the invitation tis black art which I'm sure u all don't know anything about either. U people ( and i use that term u people) are so opinionated on these blogs and cowards in person. u people get on my nerves.

Aww I wanna see the wreck that baker made of the invite lol. Maybe I don't if I wanna sleep again though. Ah well. I just wonder what the person who ordered the camcorder thought when they saw that thing. Sheesh.

See, now, that last one looks exactly like me! Those of us that were slightly less than blessed with a long waist can relate. One poster asked if they had ever seen a real woman. YES! They saw me! lol

I am also really bummed that I didn't get to see the first cake. I'm trying to piece together what it might have looked like by reading everybody else's comments. It sounds kind of scary. And green. With frog appendages.

I think I'd have more respect for the wreckerator if they just said, I can't take the humiliation please take the picture down, but oh no they have to slam you and your readers right out of the gate. I did manage to see the cake before it got the Epcot treatment. I had felt sorry for the baker at first because the invitation they had to go from was kind of creepy and I assumed that the nasty belly bump out was requested. Now that I see they have no sense of humor about it, I am less gracious.The first step to getting help is admitting you have a problem. The baker needs to consider this a wreck intervention and seek help. Not to mention, a funny bone.

@Caryl:Gone on Google Images, too, darn it. I think I would be embarrassed at first, but also I'd be secretly pleased someone cared enough to add a creation of mine to Cake Wrecks. I only wish you could have seen the Knight's Helmet Pound Cake I made for a boy scout cake auction (at my then 7-yr-old son's request). It was so hideous I insisted my husband buy it back. Anyway, if her client was happy, she should be happy. Though her client may have submitted it....

Glad I got to see that first cake before you removed it. But yeah good thing it got removed it was a bit scary. Love your site. Always gives me something to laugh at on a bad day. Sundays ROCK. Love some real talent.

I didn't think that green one was so bad the baker would want to remove it. All they forgot was the pink stuff. Weird invitation anyway. Pregnant cakes are sort of gross, like you are cutting the baby out!

@KA and all the other friends of the baker:If you knew anything about Cakewrecks, you'd realize NOTHING is sacred and we make fun of CAKES. NOT peoples' beliefs.And if you are assuming that only non African American people look at and comment on Cakewrecks, well, then, you'd be wrong.We wreckies don't really care if you say "u people" either. Cuz....uh...we aren't ignorant. So you weren't really talking to us anyway.

Just to rebut the individual insinuating that the creators and participants on this blog are racist...

I looked very closely at all of my human friends today...and they do NOT have green webbed hands. Nor do any people of ANY local on the planet. I just wanted to state that for the WRECK-ord. (Nor do any of my human friends have squiggly tentacle arms...a few guys in my past may have come close...but not quite.)

Now, I didn't think the invite was that bad, to each their own. However, that cake was not a fair representation of the invite - which is why the cake was featured here.

To make such crass and harsh attacks on those finding the fun in life regarding cake-tastrophies, is simply an example of silliness to the extreme. :P

Wow, that last one is particularly embarrassing. Marleen doesn't look like a MarLEAN now, does she? Those hamhock thighs look suspicious similar to mine, though, so I really can't joke about it too much.

This blog never ceases to crack me up. Thanks so much for making me smile time and time again.

I saw the originial picture, and really, that cake was a wreck (given that people on this site aren't keen about the 3-D preggo designs) but at least a well-executed wreck. Clearly the baker has no sense of humour to have taken such offence. (And given the appalling grammar, we should look out for another example of their work. Can't wait!).

As to KA @ 1:31 AM who posted the explanation of the artwork and the Pearl idea, thank you, that's appreciated. You could have done it much more graciously, though-- fans of this blog are from all over the world, and are thus a multitude of ethnic and religious backgrounds. We love learning about different traditions (check out some of the archives and you'll see that). But, for obvious reasons, we aren't familiar with all cultures so may interpret something incorrectly. And that's where readers in the know come in handy! There's no need to insult us for something that, without appropriate context, can be interpreted negatively. (I had the wrong interpretation of pearl, too, but because of my heritage, it was a charming one).

As for the cakes... teenceleb101@12:35-- LOVE your explanation for the building. And Leslie in AK, your explanation for the torso amputation was very amusing too :)

I'm not sure if I should congratulate ("congraduate"?) the food back for distributing so much food to needy families, or comment on my dismay that 39m pounds of food was needed. Which distracts me from the mangling of their (rather apt and lovely) logo.

And yes, I see a tank in that camcorder too. Crouching like a cat about to attack...

@KA at 1:37amYour points about people making fun of the invitation design or the inscription that was requested should be well taken. It is not nice nor called for to say mean things about what the customer had intended. There is usually a good reason for why they ordered the cake they did. (I love the story of the meaning of "pearl" and "pearl in the making."

Having said that, in reading Jen's commentary, it was obviously not Jen's intention to make fun of the invitation, which was really quite lovely. It was simply to show how badly the baker executed the order. (Imagine how lovely the cake would have been if the baker had simply made a rectangular cake with a beautiful drawing that replicated the invitation.)

It must also be noted that submissions to Cake Wrecks that show what the customer ordered v.s. the wreck that the baker made, are generally submitted either by the customer (who in this case liked what she got) or else by someone who attended the function and thought that the final result was a mess. (It appears that they often submit anonymously so that the guest of honor and/or the person who ordered and liked the cake, won't be mad at them.)

Ooh, Jen--you probably already know this, but the 'Picture This' prego full frontal cake photo still shows in the thumbnail when you look at other posts. I know you do try to honor the requests of these, shall we say 'camera shy' bakers who ask you to remove stuff, so I thought you'd want to know it can still be seen.

Okay, all controversies aside, I did see the bumpy green baby belly, and it was not what one might call "appealing" nor the least bit appetizing. It was creepy. Baby belly cakes generally ARE creepy. Who wants to really have a shower cake that so closely resembles a vivisection? Full frontal shot or side profile, it was disturbing. Would've been fine with the colors & general theme on the cake minus the creepy bump. Someone (baker?) said it was from two years ago, so that's all fine. Maybe they've honed their skills since then and would love to post something amazingly picturesque on here sometime. This is not just a place to showcase wrecks, but a great place to showcase some seriously baketastic talents.

I just wanted to say I'm very impressed at how John and Jen handled the request to remove the photo. I'm sorry I missed it, but cheers to you guys for being responsible and not furthering the drama that was threatening to unfold. I do enjoy "snark" sites like this but only when they don't get out of hand and cross over into out-and-out schoolyard mean-ness. Those blogs seem to eventually become more about the drama they've managed to stir up, rather than the actual content. I stop reading those blogs.

So kudos to you for being professionals and taking the higher road. That's what keeps me reading and keeps me a fan.

KA, I assume your references to the sorority are meant to imply you went to college and was/are a member of said sorority. If those assumptions are true, I am shocked by the quality of education you received, specifically in written English. You really should consider trying to get a refund from your place of higher learning. And use it to buy a sense of humor.

I can't believe I am about to admit this: So, I randomly came across this post yesterday, and I figured it wouldn't take long using expert search tactics to find the fabled cake online. Fast forward about 3 hours... no such luck (although I did locate the invitation). Little did I know that my "reward" would come a day later during my daily blog roll. Lo and behold, a thumbnail preview caught my eye, and although the link went to the Disney stand-in, it was enough to quench my curiosity. Jen was right... they are vastly different (no comment on the cake).

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