What other reason could there be? They’ve let other reviewers see their film, so why not me? Why deprive me — and you, my loyal readers — of my thoughts on their latest cinematic effort? Granted, one bad review from The Report would crush all their careers at once, so I can understand their fear. It still makes them cowards. That’s right, I called Chuck Norris a coward. A hundred Chuck Norris jokes will not scare me or change the fact that he won’t let me see his movie in advance.

ParaNorman wasn’t afraid of me, and he’s a wimpy looking animated kid. Granted, I didn’t see his movie either, but that’s because I had to go see “The Lion King” (review tomorrow) the same night as the “ParaNorman” screening. It’s not the kid’s fault.

C’mon, Expendables. I’m your guy. I’m not one of those snooty movie critics who bash all blockbusters and only praise pretentious indy films. I probably would’ve liked the movie if you’d let me see it.