Aug 19, 2009

I am one of those moms that spout off things to my children that have been handed down from generation to generation. 'Clean hands are happy hands', 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all', and 'Because I am the mom, that's why' are just a few. Lately, I have been saying another one that is so easily rattled off--'Good things come to those who wait'. AHHH! I am done waiting.

Our family has been in a waiting pattern for a while now. Those of you who are aware of the particulars know what I mean. My tantrum is over and I am left to be thankful. It is so easy to get caught up in instant gratification in our world of texting, overnight delivery, and IM. We want what we want, WHEN we want it. Let me be clear, I don't think it's wrong to want things to have happen or own. What Chris and I have tried to instill in the kids is that sometimes you have to WAIT for it. Through this past year we have learned to be thankful through our waiting. We are thankful for a job, health, forgiveness, a home, family, children, marriage, and countless of other simple things.

I wish at this point I had this story all wrapped up in a package of a SOLD sign, but this entry is about patience. So, we wait and wait for the phone to ring and then the ball will roll towards Arizona and our extended families. Then we will wait again. We are getting good at this waiting game. The added bonus is getting good at being thankful for whatever comes our way. The kids, really Rose, are getting tired of this holding pattern that we are in right now. Their toys, clothes, activities are out of sight. Now is the time of character building. I hope that I can exude patience and thankfulness for her example, because I really shouldn't act or feel any other way.

Jul 3, 2009

She started out as ‘the baby’ and quickly went through nicknames trying to capture all the facets of our little angel. Mwost Beautiful, Just Wittle, Sugar Bee, KK, Rosey Posey of the World, Rosey Toes, and many more that fell short of describing what she meant to so many.Caitlyn has the distinction of the being the first grandchild on both sides of her family. From the moment we knew she was coming, many began to imagine all that she would be as we watched her wiggle in the womb. She arrived and the drama that is Caity began. She gave us all a scare and came out of it just fine. She arrived home and cried so much that I freaked out and immediately took her elsewhere to escape the tiny box of heat that was our apartment. I watched her day and night praying that she would be safe and happy all of her life. Hey, I was a hormonal mom and nothing was a good as her chest heaving sighs of contentment.As the years went on Caity, I mean Rose, has had many more moments of dissatisfaction with her surroundings and events in her life. It wasn’t until just recently that I saw the change that has been happening right under my nose. She is not a little girl but a young lady.She is just nine, so she is not immune to outbursts and fits of anger. It is while watching her play with her brother and sister that one can see her maturity emerging. She has taken on many new responsibilities on her own to prove that she is a big girl. I often come down the stairs to find her attempts of helping me out by cleaning, re-organizing, cooking, and ‘baby-sitting’.The biggest change for her will happen this school year. Chris and I have decided that with our big move to Phoenix, we will re-enroll her in the public school system. She is ready. I am not. I am excited about this opportunity for many reasons, but I am going to miss her. I have really enjoyed hanging out with her this summer. The fights and screams of the past two years are fading from my mind and being replaced with laughing, talking, dreaming, and discovering of self.I am reminded of the first day of kindergarten for her four years ago. She waved good-bye and confidently walked into her classroom. It wasn’t until I got home to the silence that I realized she was on to the next chapter in her life. I cried happy tears and a little bit of selfish mommy tears. She blossomed that year. I know she will this year too. I will miss her and will look forward to her vivacious chatter in the evenings. She is nine and growing up and I can’t stop it. I will just let her go and be there to catch her as she learns all of life’s bumps and bruises and love her as she experiences all the wonderful things about living her life.

Jun 19, 2009

Here is the dance recital for Caitlyn and Malena. They both did well and I am not biased one bit. Well, perhaps I am. Colin even got some face time as he ran up on stage twice before the show began. He began to shimmy and shake for all to see. Caity has become quite accustomed to dancing in front of others. She says she thinks she is ready to sing in front of others as well. Her talent and passion are growing daily. Malena is quickly becoming a lover of the arts. She recently followed the karaoke tradition in our family by singing Part of Your World by herself complete with hand gestures and emotion. I think that Colin will break this tradition and go for Winnie the Pooh. He will shush anyone who tries to sing it with him and will direct them where to sit if they begin to dance.

I have taken a big break on blogging and I look forward to venting, I mean sharing all the wonderful daily things as things get settled. The next big thing is Caity's ninth birthday. I will post pictures of her first friend party and her first cake she is making. More on things like that later. Happy summer to all of you!

Mar 26, 2009

I can remember being incredibly excited to go and romp around in the snow at my grandparent's house whenever I had the opportunity. I would tag along with Jason and his friends proving my toughness and tenacity to the crew. I would freeze and complain, but wouldn't leave until someone or something made me go inside to thaw out just enough to come back out later.

My children continue to surprise me with their likes and dislikes as they develop their leadership skills. Malena will not do anything that she doesn't feel like doing. Caity wants to be the first to experience anything that is new for bragging rights just as any typical first-born. Colin will do things on his terms and will go longer and play harder than the girls combined.

When we woke up to Narnia, as Chris put it, I knew exactly how the early morning would go. Caity got up earlier than usual to be the first to walk and sing (singing is always involved) in the fresh blanket of white. Malena was up too, but wouldn't go out until I got dressed. Once Colin decided to obey and put on his winter attire, he went out and played until lunchtime. Not even once were all the kids outside playing together. They have built in playmates. I just don't get it; never will.

Mar 17, 2009

I live with Superman. He is on the other side of two feet, thick wavy hair, and chocolate brown eyes in the middle of lashes any grown woman would envy. His smile is wide and true. The soft baby skin is now bruised from his adventures. Chubby little hands grasp the crayon with his left hand, while pushing and evading the enemy who wants the paper to remain pristine with his right hand. He loves hard and plays even harder.

The lucky few who live with Superman are in a long process of teaching him the way that nice little super heroes should behave. His hand signing is being replaced with new words daily, and we have the job to teach him what words are deemed appropriate. Whining gets him nowhere on most days, but his charming smile can draw down even the strongest armor.

Even Superman needs a nap. He fights and charms but eventually tires out and slips into his dreams. I wonder what Superman dreams about when his legs twitch and lips curl. I know that I dream for him all the world has to offer, strength to handle what the world throws at him, and the wisdom to choose his battles.

Sharing toys doesn’t come easy him. His toys are housed among princesses and pink. Frustrations arise when the princesses want to explore in his territory. It must be hard for Superman to live in princess paradise. It has it’s pros when the princesses play mommy and are at his beckon call.

We teach Superman to love the Lord with all he has in him and walk in His ways. At least that is are aim in the coming years. He bows his head and genuflects on cue always with an accomplished smile at the end. He is quick to praise when a job well done is seen. He warns when food is hot and kisses booboos. It is hard when he realizes that kisses don’t solve everything and will gently ask, “You okay?”, and continue to pat and rub the victim.

Superman has taught me about myself this year. I think of myself as a patient person. My voice raises more than I like and frustrations well inside when repeated polite requests are denied. I have learned the power and importance of alone time. His naps coincide with a story for the princesses and reading time for me. If I fall asleep, I am greeted with Superman’s hand on my face. I thank God for the gift of our son. Boys and girls are different, and it is the differences I love the most. Well, I could do without the three ER trips this year. I am sure that this year will be filled with new opportunities for growth and challenges. I will wake up thanking God for my little Superman.

Feb 27, 2009

Feb 6, 2009

I find myself cracking up at the antics of all my kids, but Malena has a gift of comedic timing. I am sure that when I retell her stories I don't do it justice. That won't stop me, so here are just a few things that Malena has shared with me this week.

I think that I want to marry Colin because he is smaller than Dadddy. I told her that wasn't possible. She assured me that she won't tell anyone. It is a secret.

It is disgusting when you kiss dad. Your lips look like frogs.

After I am big I want to go into your belly again, 'cause I like it in there.

When I came out of the shower I asked her what she was doing. Her reply: I just want to be here because I love you so much.

I am forgetting some I know. Maybe these are cute just because she is my child, but they brought me a smile. I hope they bring you a smile too.

My blogging has been spotty because I am still trying to get Caity's blog up and going. Thank you to everyone who has checked out her blog and commented.

Feb 2, 2009

We are getting close to Colin's birthday and I continue to be charmed by his 'all boy' approach to life. He rarely performs on camera, so this is a peak at Colin talking and singing. Yes, I realize he is climbing on the chair by the coffee pot that is turned on waiting be consumed. I chose to capture this moment and quickly guide him somewhere safer to play after the recording. I wish I could say that he complied and we went on with our day. Oh, I get excited at the thought of compliance from all three in one day. A girl can dream, and I do; frequently. I have come to feel comfort in the loving chaos of our home. My typing today is accompanied by the laughter, tears, screams, growls, singing, and meowing as the kids play. Oh sweet chaos!

Jan 3, 2009

I am currently sitting down and exhausted. I absolutely loved this holiday season as much as possible when not seeing our extended families. It was season of introspection of our blessings. This time six years ago I was lost and hanging on to any familiarity that provided some degree of comfort. It was then that Chris and I took this Memphis adventure head on in the midst of my recovering from chemo treatments (that sounds worse than what it truly was) and the beginning of our marriage with our little Boo. My state of mind was just do enough to do what is expected and not too much so as to be in the way of anyone. I have lived my life like that. It has been my choice. Somewhere in my mind I have an annoying voice that says that I need to be everything to all people. It is a voice that I think I have hid behind most of my life. I have made choices based on the whispers of that part of myself.

The funny thing is, most of the choices that I have made while ignoring the what if questions, have turned out just fine. In most cases, ignoring has lead to exciting twists and turns that add a spark and warmness inside that let me know I am living. That I am not a robot executing expectations. This is the time of year for resolutions and I have obviously made mine if you read between the lines. I do this not just for me but for my children who deserve a mom who knows what it is to live for the moment.