My Sons' 12 Rules for Dating

When I think about my sons dating, I feel like I want to hurl. Not only because of the obvious dangers of casual teenage sex, but because teenage boys are stupid. Too young to know love from lust, funny from offensive, and often, respectful from disrespectful.

I also worry about their tender hearts. I know, total hurl.

I’d like to think that rules for dating are in order. If there are to be household rules on everything from borrowing mom’s car to where they go and with whom, shouldn’t there be rules associated with something as important as dating? Besides, if I’m going to go on record and publish 14 rules for dating my teenage sons, you better believe my boys will have their own set of dating rules to follow.

Without further ado, allow me to present my sons’ 12 rules for dating – may they be better men for them.

You will borrow my car 1 of 12

By the time you turn 16, I will have traded in my mobile hotel room SUV for something very small, like a Smart car with only 7.8 cubic feet behind the seats. If you're lucky you'll have just enough room in there to hold hands. Image credit: Shutterstock

Chew with your mouth closed, use a napkin and don't be gross. Hey, I've seen you at home. Image credit: Shutterstock

Don’t pressure your date into anything 10 of 12

You best not pressure your date into even holding hands if she's not ready. Image credit: Shutterstock

You will not drink and drive 11 of 12

You absolutely shouldn't be drinking, but if you do, don't even think about getting behind the wheel. Call me; I'll pick you both up. I promise I won't embarrass you in front of your date. I also promise to give you hell in the morning when you're battling your first and last hangover. Image credit: Shutterstock

Respect your date’s curfew 12 of 12

If you ever want to see your date again, you'll make damn sure she's deposited safely into her house before her curfew; her parents are waiting. Image credit: Shutterstock

Do you have dating rules for your kids?

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