Monday, June 15, 2009

It's so annoying to me that when you gain weight, you gain it from the butt up. When you lose it, it goes from the top down. If I'm going to shrink starting from the top, why can't I lose inches off of my giant noggin? I have a seriously massive head. Really, it's huge. Ryan wears a 7 1/4 size hat. I can't even pull it on past my hairline. It kind of just rests on the top of my head. Oh well. I'll take whatever weight loss I can get.

I was admiring trying to look at my shrinking upper body without too much disgust in the bathroom mirror the other day and noticed that I actually have some definition in my upper arms. Like, when I flex them, you can see muscles. I waved at myself (in the manner of Queen Elizabeth, very royally) and my skin and triceps didn't continue to wave after I stopped. I have guns! I keep asking my kids if they want to feel my guns and telling them I'm pretty sure I could take them in a fight. They just roll their eyes and shake their heads. You can tell exactly what they're thinking too. "Oh, brother! Are we really stuck with this weirdo for a mother?" I don't care. I have guns!