Welcome

Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and
others concerned about HIV/AIDS. Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the
conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning: Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive
and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a
username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own
physician.

All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators
of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please
provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are
true and correct to their knowledge.

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the
symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

IMPORTANT UPDATE
Posted Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription
is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with
secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the
"Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating
in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic
Forums. Similarly, all POZ and AIDSmeds pages,
including our "How is HIV
Transmitted?" and "Am I Infected? (A
Guide to Testing for HIV)" lessons, will remain accessible to
all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I
Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account
to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding
and future support of the best online support service for people living with,
affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author
Topic: first post here - thnx in advance (Read 5540 times)

I am a 22 gay male not sexually active until recently ( well kind of). i was fooling around with a guy i met and i learned he's hiv+. we dint have anal sex..although he rimmed by ass, sucked my cock for a few seconds and we kissed...i know this doesn't mean im at risk..but i got paranoid and im thinking about getting tested after the next 3 months.

i am not sure how to calm my self down, even though i am educated about the issue. need some advice.

OK, since you are becoming active this is a good time for you to know the basics about protecting yourself sexually with regard to HIV. All you have to do is always without exception make sure the insertive partner during anal intercourse is wearing a condom. That's it.

All of the other sexual activities are theoretically risky but we know from long experience that the only confirmed risk is unprotected anal intercourse. It's just that simple.

You are worrying needlessly about your recent experience. Use condoms everytime and you'll be ok.

HIV is a fragile virus. It is transmitted through unprotected anal sex, unprotected vaginal sex, sharing contaminated injecting equipment such as needles and syringes and in some circumstances from HIV positive mother to her unborn baby.

Saliva contains numerous substances which make the virus unable to infect people.

yeah im not worried about saliva, im thinking about the possibility of blood tranfer from him to my anus, tongue or penis. im not sure if this is even relevant.

In your list of three concerns, you mention some form of oral sex. Saliva would be present in all three situations. Even if blood is present, the substances in saliva would still inhibit any virus present.

so it doesnt matter if im the receiver or the giver regarding rimming and oral?

im asking that because he performed both, i didnt. and he's positive. i hope im not trying to say things over and over gain, i know the forum is full of threats.

Rimming? No HIV risk to giver or receiver.

Unprotected blowjobs? No risk to the receiver. There is a theoretical risk of transmission to someone who performs unprotected oral sex on an HIV positive man. However there are NO documented cases of HIV being transmitted in this way.

basically, i woke up today and i am still getting paranoid. i forgot to mention here that i ejaculated on his back/ass ( without insertion). I think in order to stop getting worried is to get tested in 3 months. there is no harm in doing so other than stressing out...

i have a genera question: so now i understand that i wasnt at risk by getting rimmed, oral for a bit and kissed a poz guy.my question is: what are the things i could do with this guy that would put me at no risk? i know kissing is safe..and i know that i can have protected sex with him but im not sure i want to take this low risk..is there any stuff i can do that have no risk at all? i hope my question makes sense...

Im 23 year old gay man. im seeing someone for about a week now but never had intercourse. we agreed he would get tested b4 we do anything, i have never had intercourse b4. last night, he was rubbing on my anus ( from the outside) but "accidentally" went inside for 1 sec and he pulled out immediately, he wasnt wearing a condom. i think even though he went inside for just 1 sec, there was still risk there right?

■Please do not start a new thread every time you have another question or thought - regardless if you think your questions are related to each other or not. It helps us to help you when you keep all your thoughts or questions in one thread and it helps other readers to follow the discussion. Additional threads will be merged.■If you cannot find your thread, click on the "Show own posts" link in the left-hand column of any forum page, under your name.

I've merged your threads here. Please keep all of your entries in this same thread in the future. Thanks for your cooperation.

As for you latest concern, you need to make sure the insertive partner is always wearing a condom until such time as you may find yourself in a securely monogamous relationship in which both partners have reliably tested negative together. What you think you know about the other guy's health history or how great he looks or what he says are not anything to rely upon. Even someone who is well meaning doesn't always know his HIV status accurately. So a condom is a must everytime.

The incident you described is technically a risk as it seems a very brief insertion took place. Rubbing or frottage of penis against penis or against anus is not a risk. Insertion is a risk. You have to decide if you want to get tested over this or not. Given what you have described I would expect you to test negative. Testing for a conclusive negative result is done at 13 weeks after the incident.

Since you're just at the beginning of this kind of sexual activity this is a good time for you to get into the habit of being careful. If you decide to test I expect you to come out of this experience ok.

he got tested last week i think and he's expected to be neg. last time he had sex was more than 28 days ago. i want to wait for his test results and if he's neg then i should be ok. i can test 3 months from now.

Well of course his testing negative will be reassuring, but for now and in the future the only test result that matters after a risk is your own result.

Not to create doubts but just being realistic about the matter, his negative result at 28 days would not be conlusive even for him if he has had any risks. At 6 weeks all but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will have done so. A negative at 6 weeks is significant but for a conclusive result we go with the CDC at 3 months/13 weeks.

I say all of this to educate and not to alarm. I expect you to come out of this incident ok.

i have a question about hiv rapid testing, when they say that the result is " final" does that mean u dont need to get tested again, im not sure how to think about it..lets say someone went and got tested, the result is negative..and it says final..do they need to get tested again?

is it that the only time that u need to get tested again even if the result is negative final is when uve had an exposure??

i have a question about hiv rapid testing, when they say that the result is " final" does that mean u dont need to get tested again, im not sure how to think about it..lets say someone went and got tested, the result is negative..and it says final..do they need to get tested again?

is it that the only time that u need to get tested again even if the result is negative final is when uve had an exposure??

thnx !

Do you mean if the word "final" appears on the printed results sheet that is returned from the laboratory?

If you're curious about this because you're wondering if you'd notice, as the receptive partner, that the condom broke, well, you're probably not going to most of the time.

If you're not using enough lube and the condom is dragging a bit as a result, you might notice that suddenly things are gliding a bit more easily. That is a clue that the condom has possibly broken. That's one example where you might notice.

If you are using plenty of lube but the condom breaks due to an air bubble in the tip, then you're not very likely to notice as the receptive partner. That's one example where you probably wouldn't notice.

When you bottom, get into the habit of reaching down and checking the condom every few minutes. This may help you identify a broken condom (because there's bits hanging down where there shouldn't be) and it will also enable you to know if he's taken the condom off, literally behind your back.

The best thing for you to concentrate on is preventing condoms from breaking in the first place. How do you do that? By using condoms correctly. A correctly used condom rarely breaks.

There are two leading causes of condom breakage.

One is not using plenty of water-based lube. Do not use lube with oil in it (and that will include most moisturisers). Lube is very important! Use it and use plenty of it.

The other is not making sure there is no air bubble in the tip. You need to pinch the tip of the condom with the finger and thumb of one hand, while rolling it down with the other. Once it's on, give it a firm stroke from tip to base, while watching the tip. If there's air in there, you'll see it. If there IS air, roll the condom back up and try again.

Once you are sure there is no trapped air, apply plenty of water-based lube and go for it.

When you're bottoming, you can watch your top put his condom on to make sure he's doing it right. You can also give the condom the firm tip-to-base stroke I talked about earlier, so you can see for yourself whether or not there's trapped air before you let him inside.

Whether you're topping or bottoming, you can make the process of putting on a condom part of your foreplay - just use a little imagination. Get some condoms and practice on yourself in the privacy of your own bedroom. This way, when you need one in the heat of the moment, correct usage will be second nature. Good, safer sex, just like anything else in life, takes a little practice.

Also please read through the condom and lube link in my signature line so you can learn more about the correct use of condoms. Remember, a correctly used condom RARELY breaks!

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts