Nice to "see" you. I haven't done much with the voice training -- tried singing a favorite song that came on the radio while driving and thought "who the heck am I kiddding?" LOL. Seriously, though, I just can't seem to get motivated on any of these types of things. I think because they are all done at home, alone. I really need to find something that will get me out and about and meeting new people. I just can't take any more of this isolation.

Yes, nice to "see" you too. I have been all sort but it's nothing new on this end. LOL.

It's a shame that you didn't get motivated enough to make a routine for yourself at home. I know about the sluggish feeling that can creep up sometimes and kinds of demotivates a person. I have gone through all his (the guy on utube) "films" and created my own daily routine.

Yesterday I had an audition and that went pretty well. Only thing that messed me up this time around was my nerves therefore my breathing was a bit off now and then. Other than that I didn't get no complaints. The genre was the blues. I do give anything a go to see how it flows...lol

I know what you are talking about singing a song that feels "out of your reach" yet I learned it all has to do with being comfortable and relaxed enough to sing a song. You don't need to sing it in the same key ...you can always give it your own twist to make it more suitable to your abilities that you got now. I have seen some guys on utube sing female songs and also give it a different twist ....and funny enough...it worked

You will encounter this also when you are able to join a group or a teacher. Do look around for those weekly choirs or theatre groups.

I hope you don't give up all together ... the bottomline for this and everything is practice, practice and more practice.

At the moment I am searching for a good microphone since the people I met yesterday already are talking about performances.

I do want to ask you something ...you mentioned it before and then today too...why do you feel isolated?

It's not really a big deal - the isolation - just starting to wear on me. I have been literally in my house 24/7 for the past 16 months with the exception of going to the grocery store, etc. My friends have all either died, moved away or drifted away and I have been out of work for the 16 months in question. I felt isolated at my last job of 7 years - did not really fit in with the energy there and also had to self-protect a lot - but at least it had me up in the morning and out into the world! The job search has picked up momentum, but the fruition is still on the horizon instead of in my hand. So in trying to detach I am looking for things to do, but all the things that come up are done in my house alone which is driving me batty! I come to this site to give to others, but need something that will be giving to me - filling myself back up - as the readings can be draining. I just need some socialization - meeting new people as well as learning something new. Hope that makes sense!

Thank you….I am excited and a bit apprehensive about the performances because I haven’t been on a stage in a very long time. The last time I was 16!!!

I understand the sensation of feeling isolated. I too had a few years back. I had a great job yet I got ill and then there was reorganisation and the most of us that came in last into the company was either fired or they left on their own. Times are challenging around the globe when it comes to work. No one is sure of anything anymore. I have broadened my search and also gave myself more options. At the moment I am just letting things unfold and I am going with the flow. I have thrown out my fishing lines in the business, creative and regular pools...just sitting back to see which water the fish fancies to swim and then make efforts to catch it. So in the meanwhile I keep busy with all sorts including volunteer work. Perhaps this is an option for you to get to mingle. So please don’t go batty!!! Lol I am the kind of person that likes to finish things and for example the singing is something that I wanted to do when I was much younger yet life happened and I didn’t pursue beside there were people around me that crushed my confidence in that area. Now after an unexpected encouragement I picked it up again. And my first step in this was vocal technique exercises with a teacher which I followed for 2 years up to last year September. I was disappointed yet that door closed upon me and another opened as in the audition. If it all progress like it is at the moment then I am completing something I set out to do since I was young. I did this also with studies. I am not in the US otherwise I would suggest more specific things for you. What I am trying to say to you is this....if there is anything that you didn’t fulfil no matter how stupid it sounds...try to complete it. And no, not everything cost money. And I am sure your guides will help you find a way to achieve it.

I consciously stopped giving reading. Yes, it is draining. Sometimes I do get a strong pull I say something other than that I keep it casual. I had someone I was guiding and always felt an off energy yet I couldn’t put my finger on it....until a good while after and then I cut them loose. So yeah geisha masks....I agree.

Don't mean to butt in, but you have done a few readings for me and if you need any advice or help with singing, I'd be happy to help. I am a trained vocalist. I have been singing performing for over 30 years.

Have you performed yet? Looking forward to hearing about the experience

As far as childhood dreams left undone....hmmm...not sure! I have always had the dream of being able to sing, but like Whitney Houston, Celine Dion or Charlotte Church! I never dreamt of the fame, just of being able to open my mouth and have that beautiful sound come out. Honestly, I don't think there are enough voice exercises in the world (lol)! When I think back on being young, I just wanted to have a successful career, travel, and be surrounded with people I love and enjoy (more quality, than quantity however). I do have a very keen interest in hot glass - glass blowing - but have researched this and there is literally nowhere in town to learn this craft. Not even the fine arts dept. at the University. There are small things I think I would like to do - but it feels more like I "should" do and I am just not motivated for some reason. I have thought about volunteering, but have been a little wary of it. In the past, whenever I did this type of work it just drained me so much. I didn't know back then that I was an empath, so I tell myself that I will be able to shield and protect my energy, but it still scares me. There were times after one day of service - taking some underprivileged children to buy school clothes, taking food baskets to families, providing Christmas trees and presents for families, etc. - and this would render me useless for several days. Literally lying in bed feeling as though a bulldozer had run over me. It was just too much for me. I am better at shielding my energy when doing readings because they are distant. As soon as I come into physical contact with someone, I still struggle with the shielding.

Anyway, I was hoping that the past year would bring me some clarity and new interests, but it really hasn't. So I am just plugging away with what's in front of me right now. First and foremost, that is the job and career path. I have several things on burners and hoping a clear path will be shown for me. Basically, hoping for a little synchronicity to come my way! My problem now is I have been mind effing myself. I can't figure out if I am being told to be patient and wait for the path to show itself - for the doors to open - or if I am being told to get moving and make something happen (lol). This is because out of the 4 things in the works, the one that was moving along the most quickly is the one I really didn't want. So I was stringing him along as best I could while giving the other things time to develop. I told myself that maybe this was the path I was supposed to take, but after calling him to follow up I literally burst into tears when I hung up. Would it really feel so horrible if it was a good choice for me? Or am I letting my past experience taint the opportunity and keeping my focus too narrow? I honestly don't know at this point. I wish I could tap into my own inner guidance on this one. I don't need to be told the future...just so wanting my guides to tell me which is the best path for me right now. Alas, no such luck! I guess part of my lesson is to figure it out myself (although that does at times seriously tick me off!)

Let me know how you're doing!

WG

P.S. Whoo! That geisha energy....ever see the movie "The Ten Commandments" with Charlton Heston as Moses? There is a scene where a low, creeping fog comes into the city to take the lives of all the Egyptian first born...icky icky energy!

Dreams are there to pursue. The only reason I am doing this (singing) now is because I had fear of the “unknown” meaning not sure that I had what it took. I am sensing that you got a tiny bit of fear also yet you call it lack of motivation. Don’t give into it. In my case an arrival of a man in my life jump started me into pulling that fear factor little by little out of my system. Not all is gone yet I am feeling much better about myself and I am not letting anyone discourage me. I know who the negative ones are and so I don’t share these experiences with them because I can feel the daggers flying my direction. lol

I agree with you that volunteer work can drain you...in the beginning it did with me too yet I found a way to deal with that. Where I work...I interact with a great deal of different energies and I had to find my way in it all. So gradually (I volunteer once a week) I started “collecting” the people that I feel energetic with and the ones that drains me I managed to get them to work on another time or day. I try by having good interactions with my colleagues creating a steady flow of energy on the day I work. So when I am tired it’s more of what I have done that day.. than people sucking out or adding negative energy. I do have off days and then I give them a fare warning that I am not in the mood and they respect that. This way we look out for each other. What is important for you to do before you do start volunteer work is to go and inspect the place. I did that before I agreed to do it. Feel out how you feel as soon you walk in the building and having the people around you. You will know.

I understand that you struggle with shielding yourself when having a great deal of energies around you ...to me it sounds that you need to do more grounding and also change your mind set. The knowledge you have now is a start...now you got to find what works for you so you will be freer in the choices you make for yourself. The problem as I see it is...if you don’t take this time of not having a job to focus on how you can deal with these energies you will continue to struggle.

Wauw glassblowing...I have seen this on TV...I find this very s.e.x.y.!! Ok can I suggest you search on the internet for a company or an artist that already does this and ask them if they know any nearby facility for you to go to and learn a thing or two? Perhaps they are looking for employees. I know you searched in town unfortunately these things are never around the corner. For my singing I also travel out of town. Also try to get some books with this subject (if you haven’t already) and see if you can do it on a smaller scale at home if you got a garden shed or something of the kind.

I have learned in the past what truly makes me happy is where I can earn my bread. I used to have different kind of jobs just for my pay check. About 13 years ago I did a career change and work in a field that totally has my heart and passion. I have never regretted it. Perhaps you are at that crossroad. So I will say look closely to those pots you got on the burner...which one would fill your tummy every time you stir your spoon into it and have the regular taste moments. Communicate to your guides that you need to get there and ask for their guidance. Yet you must make the choice and be more assertive in that. The road towards it could be straight forward and it might not be...yet don’t lose sight of the price.

I agree about not wanting to be told the future...don’t worry I won’t...yet as your guides mine left me dangling for a bit until I made up my mind and shared what I would like to see happen. Mind you...the few things that have manifested up to now are the ones that have my heart desire. Search your heart and inspect those pots!!! Fear of the unknown isn’t a good thing. Trust yourself and whatever path unfolds it’s there for you to learn something more about yourself. Just try to make it fun for you as long it’s there. Don’t settle if it isn’t what you want.

As for myself...I am swamped. I try to get on here a bit more because of the coin hunt yet I think as soon it’s over I will be a bit less. The coming week is hectic. Today I will be hunting for a new school for my son. I got a trainee at my volunteer work that tries to drive me bunkers so I got a meeting lined up with another co-worker to decide what to do with him. I have a 3 day fair lined up...the fair is about design & building materials. In the weekend I will meet up with the guys for a rehearsal. Funny enough they haven’t said...we are going to continue with you...well I would have loved to hear that yet I get an email asking if I can rehearse and what songs we are going to work on. Hmmm....so I will be rehearsing in between everything else. One song I know by heart yet they don’t know the music to it last time...so I wonder what they will come up with next week. The second song I haven’t figured out yet what version they want to hear because I found 3 and still struggle. I might wing it and make my own version...lol. The last song is work in progress...one of the guys is writing it as we go. They said if there are any other songs I would like to look into I can tell them. I think I will take tomorrow to search for more material.

I told you to smile and that things are looking up...I still believe that. And Doeyed has reached out to assist you...don’t dismiss...trust yourself. And if Rod Stewart can have a long career with his voice...who says you can’t dabble. Whitney, Celine, Charlotte all were screaming down basements before they were discovered...LOL...so don’t beat up yourself or compare. Uniqueness is the key when it comes to singing.

Flow

PS. Yes, I have seen that movie long ago. And I felt it too...yet that’s why I stepped in and tried to be friendly and see what I would get this time around...the barking started then. Last time they backed off without doing much damage. Lesson learned overall.

Well, I had a telephone interview yesterday with one of the potential jobs. It's for the Lou Ruvo Clinic which is a center for Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and Huntington's research and treatment. It is part of the Cleveland Clinic. That's why the phone interview - spoke with someone in Cleveland. It seemed to go well and she said I would be hearing from the person in charge of hiring here locally in about a week. I like that this is a place that is dedicated to helping others - and also was happy that they not only drug test potential employees, but nicotine test as well! Yay! No smoking! The building was designed by Frank Gehry and is soooo interesting. It is all chrome and looks like portions of it have melted in the sun. I will try to upload a picture. Anyway, they have two parts of the building that are connected by a center courtyard. One building is for the doctor's offices, treatment rooms and research areas. The other is an event center - a way to fund the research. The position is for the event center - sales. I don't think it will pay very much, but it is such a cool building and unique event space that I think I would enjoy it.

And today I received a call from what I had considered my first choice. Another sales position, but at a resort (what I have done in the past). They want me to come in and meet with the GM on Friday. This will be my 3rd interview and usually coming in to meet with the top dog means you have been selected and this final meet is a formality. Not sure that's what this is, but at least it's another call back. It's a beautiful resort and an old friend works there and I know we would work well together.

You know in this past year I have so struggled with "what I have always wanted to do". Part of my frustration is I still really don't have anything that puts a fire in my belly. Glass blowing is the only creative interest I really have. I did do some research, but I think the reason people don't offer the training or classes is liability - that's a pretty hot furnace that is used! And I'm in the desert, so searching outside of town would actually mean driving to a different state - at least a 5 hour drive! We are surrounded by miles and miles of desert

Maybe I'm not motivated toward the singing right now because I am so intent on getting the job thing handled first. It's been long enough and I just want this phase of my life to be concluded. Then again, if a glass blowing opportunity came up I would jump at it, so maybe it's just that I truly don't feel I have a good enough voice.

My volunteer work has always been in spurts -- meaning I have never gone to the same place to put in hours like a job. The people with whom I have volunteered have always been very cheerful, positive, helpful people. The energy drain is from the people we were actually helping. All the sorrow, grief, fear, etc. was overwhelming to me and I would absorb it. Afterward, the other volunteers would feel so elated - helping others actually gave them a high it seemed. But I was always ready to go home and get in the fetal position! I wondered what the heck was wrong with me...like I said, wasn't aware of the empath thing at the time! That's why I started to just donate money or buy clothes, etc. to give to someone else so that I would not have to be in personal contact. We have a place here called Child Haven. It is where children are sent when the parents get in trouble and are arrested or whatnot or the children just need to be pulled from the home for some reason. For a while I have been feeling like this is the place I would like to give of my time. So I think I will start there - see what I can do for them - and see how it goes.

Anyway, thank you so much for your kind words and guidance. It is very much appreciated. Hope your week is going well and that you have much fun singing with your new group of "guys" !!