I got asked this the other day, while working, by a couple of young dudes. The short answer was "not in Las Vegas." Not unless you want to risk it all in the biggest gamble of them all, and I've certainly seen a few of the classic "crack ho" type around, though by the looks of their faces and their more-than-halfway-crazy demeanor it's more likely that crystal meth is their drug of choice. Nope, it's expensive in Vegas, and it's also illegal. Go to one of the houses outside of the county -- where prostitution is legal -- and it's hardly cheap.

Not that I know from direct experience, but I have a friend who is a 'working girl' here (and I have met and talked with a few others since coming here...I seem to be a bit of a magnet for them, which is fine with me because these ladies could use a friendly presence that isn't out to get either their money or their physical assets) and she pretty consistently brings in $500 or so for an hour of work. She's pretty stunning, and I have no idea if that kind of price is anywhere near the norm, but anything even near half of that is good money no matter how you look at it.

It's dangerous money, though. I don't especially have a moral objection to prostitution (nor do I have any particular moral support of it) because, unless there's something else going on (such as the girls stealing from their clients or the men beating the girls up), it's really a victimless crime. At least at the scene of the crime -- the client's family relationships are another story and very much his problem, not the prostitute's.

I think it is ridiculous that it's illegal in Las Vegas, because it's legal in most of the rest of the state and I have a hard time believing that Vegas is somehow more 'moral' than is Carson City or wherever. My friend tells me she pays thousands a year in fines (and the police have no real desire to arrest these women) and so maybe it's as simple as it being a good source of income for the county. And the hypocrisy doesn't end there: in prior days, girls would grant favors to and/or pay security personnel in exchange for being protected in working a particular casino, but now that's shifted mainly to the casino managers and similar, who take money (etc) in exchange for allowing the girls to work their place without being hassled or 86'd while, at the same time, using security officers to prevent the competition plying their trade in the place. The simple fact is that casino managers and the like want girls handy for their high rollers, especially, so they will allow certain ladies free passage.

It's terrible, in general, because keeping it outlawed makes it unsafe for everybody and, with all the billboards and magazines that literally advertise the services of prostitutes here, any visitor to Vegas could be forgiven for assuming that it is legal here. It sucks.

My friend was badly beaten a while back -- someone broke several ribs and left her with nasty bruises all over her sides, back, and arms -- and she had no protection or recourse. And pimps -- scum of the earth -- are out to get independents like my ladyfriend, and will either hurt them themselves or pay some man to go with her and then burst into the room and beat the hell out of her to put her out of work for a while. Shoot the f***ing pimps (maybe even with one in the groin or kneecap before blowing their freakin' heads off) and make prostitution legal in Clark County, you bastards, and make it controlled financially and in terms of mandatory health check-ups to protect everyone involved. There may still be an argument that the women are being exploited -- or perhaps that the men are being exploited -- but at least those a**hole pimps wouldn't be so directly and brutally (often) exploiting the women and the whole would be safer in every respect. And the greedy f***s in the County hierarchy could still rake in money from the operations. And they'd even be able to sell the whole 'Sin City' marketing bullsh** as a reality, for once.

Um...kinda got off on a tangent here but I guess I feel pretty strongly about this. Like I said, I am kind of ambivalent on the subject of prostitution itself -- I have no desire to ever take advantage of such services, even during long periods of celibacy when donuts start to look sexy -- but I think it's not going anywhere and its being illegal (and here I mean beyond the borders of Las Vegas, in the wider USA, although if the rest of Nevada were not open to prostitution I probably wouldn't feel anywhere near as strongly that it should be legalized in Clark County) only makes it more dangerous, all around, than it needs to be.

I am kind of glad that my friend is moving from Vegas and getting into a new life, though I will miss her a lot. We have an acknowledged mutual crush of the high-school variety (she is absolutely gorgeous and she thinks it's cool that "my boyfriend is an Elvis!") but, no, I never acted on it beyond a bit of snuggling when she needed a safe harbor, a lot of hugging, and massaging her back when she was recovering from that beating. As beautiful and thoroughly nice as she is, I honestly never wanted to go any further, as much because I wanted to be someone who didn't want things from her -- it was very touching, and sad, when she first spent any length of time with me, after her beating, and couldn't understand why I was willing to be with her yet not make a move on her or otherwise take advantage of her -- as it was because knowing that getting involved romantically with a call girl was probably not a brilliant idea. I mean, I've met several of Hollywood's proverbial "hookers with a heart of gold" archetype since being here, though I think they often have a flipside that's a little tougher and meaner than in the movies, but Pretty Woman was a fantasy. If she'd stayed, I could see myself possibly going to war with pimps in her defense and those dudes have guns...I'm not sure it would have been a happy ending. So, goodbye, baby. I'm happy she is getting out of that business.

But why do these young men, usually in groups, so often come up to me and ask where the hookers are? Because I'm dressed like Elvis? I have no idea where they are -- I usually just tell 'em that they're everywhere here and that the best way to find one (Vegas is not characterized so much by, as are other cities, the women who overtly ply their trade or approach cars and the like) is to sit at a bar and they'll get to know you and it'll soon enough become clear that they're on the job. What's really funny is that, with a few exceptions I've encountered (leopard print miniskirts with thigh-high boos...that sort of thing) the real working girls here dress far more chastely than do many of the female tourists...I mean, they show off their form, all right, but the hooker-chic look is almsot entirely the province of visitors who're not in the business.

These dudes often ask me where the best strip clubs are, too, so I just repeat a couple of names I've heard of from afficionados because I've never in my life been inside such an establishment. Not yet, anyway.

This world is a far cry from that of my primary career, the one I went to school for all those years (heck...most of my life). But this is school, too, of a sort, and it's all very interesting. Weird and wonderful (and, sometimes, not so- )

Hmmm...I guess this post started as just a "what the hell?" musing on the kind of buffoonish group-courtship habits of Maxim-subscribers but it became something else, so let me now holler out in to the Ether my wishes for my beautiful friend, my beautiful rich (at least, I hope she saved some of that money) friend, in her new life, wherever it takes her. I'm reminded of the Doors song, "The End" ("this is the end...beautiful friend") but, as much as it's an ending of one thing, it's very much just The Beginning for her...

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