American voters are knuckleheads

A recent poll reveals that Congress has a 9 percent approval rating — its all-time low. And as shocking as that number is, headline writers have missed the real story:

9 PERCENT OF AMERICANS, KIDNAPPED BY ALIENS, HAVE JUST RETURNED HOME!

Or this one:

IT’S OFFICIAL: MOST AMERICANS ARE SADISTS!

Because, despite our disdain for the bickering, out-of-touch, dysfunctional partisans on Capitol Hill, we keep sending the vast majority of them back to Washington.

And that makes us, American voters, the Knuckleheads of the Week.

Since 2000, these are the re-election rates for the House: 98, 96, 98, 94, 94 and 85 percent. And for the Senate: 79, 86, 96, 79, 83 and 84 percent.

In other words, we tell Congress: You really stink. Here’s my vote. Now go stink some more.

Yeah, yeah, we know about congressionally rigged safe districts. But come on, when your popularity is somewhere between marriage mocker Kim Kardashian and an eve-of-the-prom forehead zit, no district should be safe.

Congress’ approval rating is now lower than President Richard Nixon’s during Watergate and BP’s during the Gulf of Mexico oil spill last year.

Here’s what CNN political analyst David Gergen said after the congressional deficit reduction supercommittee’s failure:

“They were elected to do a job. If they can’t get the job done, they should lose office. You know in corporate America, if you’re a CEO, if you’ve got a leadership role, and you fail in your job, you’re out.

“And I just think a lot of citizens have gotten to the point now that they really don’t care if you’re a Republican or a Democrat. If you can’t get the job done, let’s get somebody else in there who can protect the country. Americans are more than fed up with this.”