ENOUGH ROPE finishing up at the end of 2008

After six years of edge-of-the-seat television, multiple awards and a re-definition of the meaning of a talk-show, ABC TV and Zapruder's other films are today announcing that ENOUGH ROPE will not return in 2009. More >>

Episodes

Teenagers

Teenagers; they're lawless, drug-taking morons living out their perverted fantasies on Internet porn sites. At least, that's what the media tell us. But as the headlines get bigger, we seem to know less and less about teenagers; who they are, what they do, and has much really changed over the years? So we have with us tonight teenagers from three different generations. Two are with me now. Please welcome Ya El, Julian, Sian and Edmund.

Andrew Denton: Now Ya El and Julian, you're both 17?

Ya El Stone: 18, last week.

Julian Dibley-Hall: Nearly turned 18. I'm 17.

Andrew Denton: I don't need you to come out of the closet.

Julian Dibley-Hall: Are you sure?

Andrew Denton: We're not going there today.

Julian Dibley-Hall: Oh, OK.

Andrew Denton: Have you, at any stage this week, been on an Internet porn site or in any other way disrupted the free running of society?

Ya El Stone: All the time. No, no.

Andrew Denton: Just checking, just checking. Did you check with your parents if it was OK to come on the show tonight?

Ya El Stone: No.

Julian Dibley-Hall: No.

Andrew Denton: Didn't cross your mind?

Julian Dibley-Hall: Told them I was going on. Just told them, didn't ask.

Ya El Stone: In fact, we both said that they couldn't come and watch.

Julian Dibley-Hall: Yeah.

Andrew Denton: Edmund, had it been you as a teenager, would you have asked your parents if you could come out on a night like this?

Dr Edmund Graham: As a teenager, yeah, I think you'd feel obliged to do that. They'd like to know what you're doing.

Andrew Denton: Mm-hm. Sian?

Sian Graham: Definitely, yes. Wouldn't have been allowed out, probably, at this stage without parents knowing where you're going.

Andrew Denton: So you were a teenager when?

Sian Graham: Oh, in the, er, early '50s. Early to middle '50s.

Andrew Denton: Early to middle '50s. And for you, Edmund, you were a teenager when?

Dr Edmund Graham: A teenager? Well, let's see. I'm 75 now. So I was a teenager just, er, before the war 1945. '27, '37, '47. In '47, I almost went to the war, but the war had ended.

Andrew Denton: Oh! Good for you. Lucky you.

LAUGHTER

Julian Dibley-Hall: Very lucky.

Andrew Denton: So, Sian, I'll ask the question again. What did you get in trouble for as a teenager?

Sian Graham: Well, one, in particular, incident I can think of is, um, missing the last bus home on a Saturday night.

Andrew Denton: Ooooh!

Sian Graham: This particular night, it's the only time I ever missed it. But, um, there was a young man nearby called Ambrose. I've never forgotten his name. (Laughs) And he very kindly walked me home.

Andrew Denton: How far was it?

Sian Graham: Quite a long way. Five miles.

Andrew Denton: Wow!

Sian Graham: So, needless to say, by the time we got home, my parents were standing there looking decidedly grieved, very angry. Didn't even thank, um, Ambrose for bringing me home. And he just turned around and walked all the way back again.

AUDIENCE: Awww!

Andrew Denton: And Awww!

Julian Dibley-Hall: That's very sweet.

Andrew Denton: And what did they say to you? Were you punished for this?

Sian Graham: Well, you know, "Where have you been?" and "What happened?"

Andrew Denton: Were you sent to your room for a decade?

Sian Graham: Just about. Three times to church on Sunday.

Andrew Denton: What about you, Ya El? What do you argue with your parents with most? Or about most?

Ya El Stone: Oh, you've asked at a really bad time. (Laughs)

LAUGHTER

Ya El Stone: No, um Just recently I've got a new boyfriend for the first time, sort of, in my teenagehoodness. And, um, I don't think they really like him. (Laughs) He's there a lot. Um, he eats a lot. He eats a lot.

Andrew Denton: And what's the issue, as far as your parents are concerned, with that?

Ya El Stone: Um, I think it's a school thing. Um, because I've always been really into my school thing. And I think they're probably terrified that I've come this far and done quite well, and now I'm gonna blow it all in my final year, because I'm doing my HSC now.

Andrew Denton: By having someone else in your life?

Ya El Stone: Yeah, yeah, by having a distraction, however pleasant that

Andrew Denton: And are you like that? Do you sit there doodling his name into your desk

Andrew Denton: I wish I hadn't said that out loud. I'm terribly sorry.

Ya El Stone: That's OK.

Andrew Denton: That does raise an interesting question. Edmund, as a teenager, tell us about your first date.

Dr Edmund Graham: When I was a teenager, there used to be a custom in which you would be invited to parties and you didn't know who invited you. And, er, one Christmas period, there were 17 parties I was invited to by people I didn't know. And the only reason I was invited was because when people had girls, daughters, in the family, they used to try to expose them  if that's the right word  to as many young

LAUGHTER

Dr Edmund Graham: ..as many young men as possible.

Andrew Denton: Yes.

Dr Edmund Graham: You used to book a dance, because each girl had a card with 20 slots on it. And so the first, second, third, up to the 20th dance. And so you'd go up to a girl and say, "Can I have dance number 17?" or something like that, and then that was booked for the evening.

LAUGHTER

Dr Edmund Graham: And there was no booze, no I remember dancing with a girl, and I said to her, you know, "Can I have the last dance?" And she said, "You're having it. You've trodden all over my toes."

Andrew Denton: And what would you wear for a night out like this?

Dr Edmund Graham: Oh, tails.

Andrew Denton: Tails?!

Dr Edmund Graham: The amazing thing Yeah. At 18 years of age, at this particular function, it was tails  white tie and tails.

Andrew Denton: Did anything happen of a date-esque nature?

Dr Edmund Graham: Not very much. At that time, not very much. On the first date, it would be very foolish to make an advance.

Andrew Denton: Right.

Dr Edmund Graham: You could make an advance, but

Andrew Denton: What would an advance be?

Dr Edmund Graham: Oh, well, a bit of a kiss, a bit of pasho

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

Dr Edmund Graham: And, er 'Pasho' they call it now, is that right?

Ya El Stone: Pasho?!

Dr Edmund Graham: Pasho?

Julian Dibley-Hall: Pashing.

Dr Edmund Graham: Pashing! Oh, pashing, yes.

LAUGHTER

Dr Edmund Graham: Anyway But this, of course, was long before the period of the pill. You know, the pill revolutionised the world. And so men had to be very cautious.

Andrew Denton: Yes. Er, Sian, how did you learn about sex?

Sian Graham: Well, I think there was one episode at home I remember, sitting around the dining room table. And my father leaned across the table and he said, "You know, Lynette Williams got married at the weekend." I said, "Oh. Interesting." She was only about a year older than me and I thought that was a bit odd, but anyway. He said, "Yes, she had to get married, you know?" Full stop. That was it.

Andrew Denton: That was it.

LAUGHTER

Sian Graham: That was it.

Julian Dibley-Hall: So that's how they did it back then.

Andrew Denton: Tell me, er, Julian, as a teenager, how have you learned about sex?

Julian Dibley-Hall: Oh, you know, the friends are always helpful and the odd experimentation's nice.

Andrew Denton: Is it the old first base, second base, home base sort of thing?

Julian Dibley-Hall: That's well, I don't know. Went on a nice first date last Friday. It was very lovely.

Andrew Denton: Tell me about it.

Julian Dibley-Hall: It wasn't really planned. It was sort of, "Hey, what are you doing after school?"

Andrew Denton: Right.

Julian Dibley-Hall: Took got some takeaway coffee, went and sat in the park, had a nice chat, had a bit of pasho, I think it's called. A bit of pasho. Um, it was lovely.

Andrew Denton: We have our third generation, actually, sitting in the audience. These are the people of my generation, so, you know, they're still cut, they're still healthy, strong, vigorous people. (Moving to sit among audience) Er, Jenny and John, who, er I'll just move that. Thank you so much. Would you mind if I just shift in here? Jenny and John, who are in their 40s and therefore were teenagers in the '70s. Now, um, a typical date for you, Jenny. What was a typical date like?

Jenny: I can remember, Andrew, my first date. Going to the movies. Mum and Dad drove us to the movies. They watched us walk into the movies. We saw the movie, and then we got picked up by Mum and Dad and they took us home again.

Andrew Denton: And did you actually SEE the movie?

LAUGHTER

Jenny: Saw a bit of it.

Andrew Denton: What about you, John?

John: I guess a typical date later on in my teens would have been a party where a large group of us would have been together and, um and hoping that you ended with the girl of your dreams.

Andrew Denton: You mentioned drugs. Is drugs, er, part of teenage culture for you?

Julian Dibley-Hall: It's definitely present as a teenager. You can't really be a teenager and not be exposed to drugs these days, I think.

Andrew Denton: Sian, were there any drugs in your teenage life?

Sian Graham: No drugs at all and no alcohol until, um, oh, 18, 19, when I went up to university.

Andrew Denton: Was this considered absolutely forbidden?

Sian Graham: In my household, yes. In my home, yeah. I think my parents had sherry on Christmas Day or something like that. But, I mean, going to parties, you didn't have alcohol.

Andrew Denton: What else did you do? Did you play parlour games? Was it, er

Sian Graham: Actually, yes, we did. We did.

Andrew Denton: Really?

Sian Graham: Yes, I'd forgotten that, yeah.

Andrew Denton: What did you do?

Sian Graham: Oh, well, variations on blindman's buff, I seem to remember. (Laughs) And there was one where you sat in a circle. All the girls sit down, one boy behind each girl, um, and then there was some way or other that you had to hop up, or somebody stood in the middle and the boy had to quickly get into that seat. It was some complicated

Andrew Denton: Right. It was it was foreplay.

LAUGHTER

Dr Edmund Graham: Ha! Foreplay, yeah. (Laughs)

Andrew Denton: That game's still around, you know? I'm going to head back here to sort of wind this up. (Moves back to stage) I'm, er I'll sit down before I ask this. Sian, what, for you, was the definition of teenage happiness?

Sian Graham: Feeling part of a group. That would have been one of my fears  of not being part of a group, to be ostracised or left out. It was very important. You know, we all wore the same clothes and you tried your best to look like everybody else, and to meld in with the group.