I'm so scared

Right now, I doing great on my diet, but at times because of so many failed diets, I just second guess myself. Since I started this diet, I've been so afraid that I'm going to go back to my old habits. How does one stay on a diet and but not think so much about the diet? I really need the advice ladies.

For me, it was when I realised I couldn't just "diet". That the times before, when I lost weight, then when back to my old eating and no excersize habits, I gained the weight back. And it brought its friends. There is a full fledge fat party taking place. So, I researched, looked, thought about it. Made lists of what foods were faves and which I could do without. Not forever, but never again in the same quantity. Then, I figured out how many cals were for me per day. then, from there figured out the ratio I wanted in regards to fat/carbs/protien. Then worked the food I liked most back in there, just healthier.

It truly became a way of life for me. Grocery shopping use to take an hour. Now it takes longer, sometimes, because I spend SO much time reading labels, comparing nutrition. Some things, are staples, every week, fresh fruits and veggies. Every week, lean cuts of meats and whole grains. But, then I toss in more convenience food snacks and spend time comparing. I want the most nutritional bang for my calories.

It's just what I do. I get up, brush my teeth, kiss my kids, have coffee, eat healthy, move some, and the day ends. It's a way of life, a way of eating, a way of being. Not something I start and stop depending on the scale.

If on the day your scale reads 120, will you go celebrate with a big mac, supersized fries, pizza hut and soda? Or will you just keep on keeping on? I think thats thr true thought process of those who are successful and those who need to relose the same weight, over and over.

Okay... I'm so with you on this. I have tried time after time to lose the weight- and each time I'm sure it's the last and it's going to work. But I remember something that I read in Dr. Phil's book- it has to be a lifestyle change- not just a "diet". But I think that change is hard for everyone- how do you all of a sudden overhaul your life and start eating right and exercising without relapses? I've been working on this life change for a while now- I don't buy the crappy food and I make an effort to get more steps in every day (like taking the shopping cart back to the front of the store instead of just rolling it over to the curb or cart corral). I don't think it's easy- and I think we all have a right to be scared- but hang in there- we're all in this together!!

I totally understand where you're coming from with this. This effort "feels" different but it's bound to end in failure cos all the other ones have - right?

You know what - I really don't think so. I've been going for about 2 months now and it's taken me until this week to stop obsessing about it. I seem to be losing weight incredibly slowly. In the past if I'd lost weight this slowly I would have had a big temper tantrum and given up. Instead I've carried on going and I'm 7 lbs lighter. That's the first quarter of my weight gone so it's actually a huge achievement.

My answer to your question is that that will come of its own accord. I think you'll be thinking about it for a while yet because it's new but there will come a point in time when it 's second nature for you and you're just doing it. That happened to me this week really. Now if it would just happen on the exercise front................

The most important thing ~ FORGIVE yourself for whatever has gone "wrong" in the past. I know it's hard to not think about past failures, I really do. You HAVE to let go of them though. Those things are IN THE PAST and you, my dear, are currently IN THE PRESENT. If you will just forgive yourself and let go you can concentrate fully on RIGHT NOW. No past effort matters anymore. It's over. It happened and you can not change what has already happened! However, YOU HAVE THE POWER to change WHAT YOU WANT right now! Today! This moment! Focus on minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day - whatever YOU NEED to keep going. Worrying about stuff that hasn't even happened is a waste of precious energy that you need to use RIGHT NOW in your journey.

Instead of worrying, make a new habit of positive self-talk. And don't say "I'm going to be..." say "I AM healthy! I AM fit! I AM beautiful! I AM confident!" With each step that you take towards reaching your goal, say these wonderful things to yourself! After a little practise, you WILL believe it!!

You CAN do this, I KNOW you can!! We are one in the same - I have lots of little "failures" behind me, but I look at them as building blocks which have gotten me to RIGHT NOW! The choices and the things we do NOW are all that matters!!

By the way that quote you posted Velveteen is in my signature. I liked it that much and felt it rung so true for me and probably many others.

I really think that's what it all boils down to. You simply can not dwell on the past.You must look to the future and more importantly THE PRESENT. Every day is a new day with a new opportunity for improvement. One day at a time.

Like many posters have already said it is also key to not look at this as a diet. A diet to me has a beginning and an END. Ends are no good here. That's why we call it a lifestyle. Lifestyles go on and on and continue, there's no stopping. It is a concept that has to really be implanted in the brain. And it's doable.

Hey Miss Honey. I know what you mean about diets of the past... the lose weight/gain weight cycle... And when it happened to me, most often it was because I was trying something that wasn't sustainable for me in the long run. The foods were too much the same (I can hardly stand turkey now... ), or there was too much preparation required (I'm not one to cook), or I was "too busy" to keep up with the program, or I just plain got tired of the effort and said to myself those fateful words:

Oh what the heck who cares

And then I just dropped the whole plan. You know what happens next.

Make sure whatever plan you are following has enough variety and gives you enough nutrition that you can keep on doing it. Yes, you may feel hungry at times, or have cravings, but no one said it would be easy. For me it's a day at a time, sometimes a meal or snack at a time. I use the FitDay tracker to help me stay accountable--so that I can't kid myself about how much I eat. Yes, I think about food and my plan a lot. Something would be strange if i didn't! Some things become second nature after awhile, however--like, I know I'm not eating a Big Mac today, so I don't have to think about that!