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I graduate next month... and my mother seems nonchalant about the occassion.

she does not see what the big deal is because i do not have a high paying job waiting for me upon graduation or a job relating to my major.

i currently work... and have a steady income....
she critiques everything I do... i told her i may plan to open my business.... she tells me "well what did I go to college for. i just want to be my own boss."

i think its a great accomplishment graduating from college.... from my mom's attitude she does not. she did not attend college i thought maybe she would be happy i am....

i asked her will she hang up my college diploma she said whatever if I want to.

woww thats ridiculous. im in a similar situation. when my brother graduated with his AA she gave him a gift (money) and when my SIL graduated highschool she gave her money
im graduated this spring and then transfering to a university.
i said something about how would she and my dad handle my twins at my graduation and she was lik e"oh i didnt even knwo you were doing that" meaning she didnt kno wi was going to walk the stage and it makes me feel like she isnt thinking about it.
not that i expect her to give me a gift. im a grown up i wont die if i dont get a graduation gift. but it will bother me a little if she doesn't make an attempt to acknowledge it because shes alway doing these things for my brother and never follows through for me.
we're doing this for us and our kids though so screw them. when we have tons of $$ from our jobs they can babysit while we go on vacation ;)

Answer by
Anonymous
at 11:46 PM on Apr. 7, 2011

I dunno about jealous, maybe she just feels like it was a waste of your time. Was she a stay at home mother? Does she maybe not understand what a huge thing it is for you to graduate college since she never did it? Not having a job relating to your major is probably throwing her off. She might be thinking "Why waste all that time and money on school, take time away from your children, to get a job that has nothing to do with your degree?"

Approach her like this: " I know that you may not be as excited as I am at the fact that I am finishing school. You must admit, however, it is a difficult thing for anyone to do. After years and years of hard work, this is a major accomplishment in my life that I am proud of and I hope you can at least pretend to be happy for me. " Then throw yourself a wonderful party at a fine restaurant with all the friends that WILL appreciate what you went through. :)

=\ i wouldn't think about that too much. my mom was never really pleased with anything i did, and it depressed me as a high schooler. even when i graduated at the top of my class. now i realize, you just can't please or impress everyone. even if it is you're own mother. at the same time.. maybe she just doesn't know what to say. my mom can be really caught up in her own thing, so it'll seem like she doesn't care... it's weird talking about her like that. i know the love is there.

I don't know about your mom's educational background or current life..but maybe she is jealous that you are young and have your whole life ahead of you... .. usually unhappy people criticize others... make sure she knows you are doing what's right for YOU, and that while you appreciate her concern, and love her very much, you have to live your own life.

Maybe she is jealous that you have a college degree and she doesn't ? It might make her feel bad about herself. You would think a mother would be happy for you and proud of you, but some people (parents or not) can't get passed their own issues to be happy for others. ya know ? I say let it go. As hurtful as it is, you are only putting salt in your wounds when you bring it up and she's not excited about it. You know you did a wonderful job and you should be proud of yourself. Congrats, Girl !!!