CJ's Life

We have gathered in this church and at this school where our son CJ has deep roots.

Father Craig – CJ’s pastor since he started high school here and his team priest.

Father John

The strong arms of each of you and this church have been around the Hubbard family in this time of need.

Our family and our friends who are here from alaska to florida and all points in between - our Coto Community - our Marine Corps’ Family – Thank you.

And to All of CJ’s friends who loved him and who knew how much he loved you back – for us you are now his living legacy – you are our lasting connection with him – you are now his eternal flame.

The presence of each of you here today has given us strength – and most importantly because of each of you – we know that brighter days are ahead – and happiness and even joy will return to our lives - no matter how changed.

My standing here today at this service violates the natural order of life – and I ask you to indulge a proud father as I talk about my son

What is extraordinary is that almost everyone in this huge gathering had their own direct and personal connection with CJ – your own memories of him – your own CJ stories to tell us.

For such a young man, he touched so many lives - and he stayed in your lives.

I ask this of each of you - on this day we are here to celebrate our son’s life – no one was better at celebrating than CJ – so let us not disappoint him here today. He has even arranged for some Irish weather.

Clinton Joseph Hubbard

His mother gave him the name - His grandmother said that this was a big name for a little baby boy. Not long thereafter, his Aunt Gail called him “CJ” – and then so did everyone else.

When CJ started to walk and talk, I asked his mother – did you put a Blarney Stone in his crib? He hit the airwaves running. But he spoke in a way that made him seem more mature and older than his years. As a small toddler I called him my “Main Man” – how’s my main man.

During his childhood certain character traits emerged that stayed with him for all 27 years of his life. I want to review just a few.

CJ could be stubborn. But he was stubborn in a devotion to certain principles, or a persistence to reach a goal or life objective – or a passion for something he felt was right or important. And when combined with his steadfast loyalty to others – you would not have wanted him any other way.

CJ was a competitive fellow. He loved to compete – in sports – in business. But for him it was the camaraderie of being on a team, or with your business colleagues - that drove him. And that sense of camaraderie extended to those on the other team, or on the other side of a business transaction.

When he was learning to play golf as a young teenager, I told him that you play the ball as it Lies and count all your strokes. He immediately understood the honor and tradition of the game. It came so naturally to him. You play by the rules – win or lose you share a beer and a laugh afterwards. He was a true sportsman.

Another strong characteristic –

CJ liked to have a good time. He loved to laugh, music and dancing – as you all know, he considered himself the finest Caucasian dancer in the land. He liked to get a little rowdy like his Irish ancestors.

He studied in Spain – He traveled extensively. Sporting events, concerts, good restaurants, pubs and bars – bungee jumping and skydiving. Basketball leagues and snowboarding. He worked hard and played hard.

A few weeks ago, cj joined 4 other fraternity brothers in New York for Halloween – they dressed in identical penquin costumes and had the ‘march of the penguins” through the clubs of Manhattan. They claim they received rock star attention – and THIS was now an annual event. Jeremy – I recently saw the party pictures of the two of you in the Greek islands. I locked them up.

CJ wanted to experience it all. It is said that you should live each day as if it is your last – and he did that. It was as if he knew.

Cj cared deeply about others. The hundreds of personal notes we have received all have the same message of specific things he did to help another. Random acts of kindness to very personal assistance. When CJ Hubbard was your friend – it was a commitment to have fun together and to take care of each other – that simple.

CJ had a very strong sense of family – he had that love that only a boy and then a man can have for his mother – and she for him. The unique bond created by a mother’s love for her son.

And his sister Jessica – what stands out is not just the strong love and affection for each other – they flat out had fun together – and such respect for each other.

When Jessica married Jaime Johnson – cj made it clear that Jaime was not a brother-in-law – he was his brother.

He adored his aunts and uncles – and they him – and with his cousins two things would always happen – loud talking and laughter, and A late night.

* * *

Each father looks forward to the transition of their son from boyhood to manhood. This transition for CJ began on the campus right outside these doors.

He was a good student – he was class president for two years. He became a leader at the church Kiros retreats. He also spent his fair share of reporting to the principal’s office for various infractions.

When he wasn’t in class, he lived at the gymnasium. He was a gym rat. For two years – he was there at 6:00 a.m. Each morning. He played basketball on his last night.He was an undersized point guard in love with the game of basketball - so He had to outwork everyone to succeed – he had to be stubborn - and competitive - with teammates who were so bound together. They are here today in force.

CJ was so proud to be a Santa Margarita catholic high school Eagle. He was truly lifted on Eagle’s wings when he was here. He left these grounds with a strong mind, a strong body, a strong spirit – and a gentle heart. A heart which is now giving another person life.

And it was off to Westwood and UCLA. All of you know that CJ was a proud Bruin - some say obnoxiously so –especially his usc sister. But it was his relationship with his fraternity brothers that set his course for life. Pat, Colin, Adam, Ian, Jeremy Griffin and Jeremy Golberson, Chris Leveque and Chris Ferraris – each of you set an example of high achievement and high character for the other.

The ucla school color – True Blue – perfectly described your lifetime devotion for each other. Adam flying in from Africa to join in the honor guard today is so typical of this devotion - as well the others who have traveled such distances.

Early on, CJ decided he wanted to be a commercial real estate broker. He liked the combination of client contact, negotiations, technical knowledge, and high-rise office buildings.

After college he found the perfect opportunity at Cresa Partners. Led by West Point graduates - he found an organization with high integrity, hard work and dedication to their mission – team work and camaraderie. For the past 4 years he could not wait to get to work each day. Kevin Hayes – you opened the door for him to be the youngest hire – he ran through the door – and found his professional home and work family.

As I watched CJ go through school and begin his career, he was no longer just my son who I loved – he had become a man who I respected - I admired him - I looked up to him.

When a man always does the right thing – even when no one is looking - has strong loyalties, takes responsibility for him and takes care of others, has courage – both physical and of his convictions – in my world we have a short and simple phrase which describes such a person - “He’s a good man”. CJ Hubbard was a good man.

Sheila and I have lost a son who will be forever young. I have lost a man who was my best friend, my buddy, my ‘main man.”

- Clinton L. Hubbard (CJ's Father)

From the moment my mom brought CJ home from the hospital, I decided he was my baby and all I wanted to do was take care of him. Of course, it was a little tough to share the attention. After all it had been 19 months of me, me, me, but if I was going to share with anyone it would be this adorable baby boy.

I loved my new baby brother so much that my mom had trouble keeping me away from him. She has often told me of the time she need to quickly get some things done in the kitchen, so she placed CJ in his bassinet on top of the dining room table out of my reach, or so she thought. Well, at just nineteen months old, I was not going to let a little height keep me from being with my brother. I thought, he shouldn’t be up on there all alone, and I decided to climb my way up so that I could hold him. Just as I was taking him out of his bassinet, out walked my mom from the kitchen, and fortunately what could have been a disaster was averted. However, my desire to be with him never faded, and the love I feel for him had no boundaries from day one.

Throughout the years my mom would often times have to separate us to keep us from being troublemakers whether we were young kids or full grown adults. Even to this day and a mother myself, CJ and I would still struggle to make it through church sitting next to each other, without some giggles. It was like we would revert to being 5 years old and my mom had to sit between us, the same way it has always been. I will admit it was a little embarrassing to be 28 years old and getting dirty looks from other people because I could not control my laughter. However, this is one of the things I loved most about my brother- His ability to make me laugh. I don’t think I will ever laugh as hard or as often without him in my life and in many ways I don’t want to. This was something special the two of us shared and I can still hear him giving me a hard time for things I say or do.

He loved to tease me. In fact, when he was about 5 years old, he told me that it was his job to bug me and I can tell you just like in every other area of his life he was so good at it… professional really. The copy cat game was one of his specialties. Does everyone remember the copy cat game, where someone is talking and another person just repeats everything they are saying? Well, CJ had mastered this game and he could do it for what seemed like hours. He always knew exactly what to say to get me fuming, but he also knew exactly what to say to build me up and vice versa.

It has never mattered how mad I may be at him, I never wanted someone to so much as look at him funny. My husband, Jamie, who loved CJ dearly and even chose him to be the best man for our wedding, can tell you first hand that no one could EVER say anything negative about CJ, except maybe me. When I would come to Jamie with some sort of CJ complaint, Jamie learned to just keep his mouth shut. This was after the first few times, when he would simply agree with me as a show of solidarity and I would quickly turn on him and end up mad at him instead. Nobody, including my own husband, was ever allowed to think of my brother as anything other than a saint. This may seem unreasonable, but by all accounts I do think he was pretty perfect… and I am not biased at all. He was my brother and as his older sister, I was very protective of him.

I always wanted the best for him, and fortunately for a protective and proud older sister he usually got it. He was always good at everything he did from making good grades to life long friends, from making an eagle on the golf course to a three pointer under pressure, from making a savvy business decision or an improbable deal. CJ knew how to get things done and usually with a contagious grin on his face. But what CJ knew how to do best of all cannot be measured by any material attainment, but rather by a feeling in the heart. Perhaps, what he was best of all at doing was MAKING PEOPLE FEEL GOOD.

He always knew just what to say to make me smile. His cards, for anyone fortunate enough to receive one are legendary. I looked forward to his cards at every holiday. He would always take the time to not just buy a card, but fill it with words that made me feel so special. Often times at Christmas I would feel inadequate when he would give a thoughtful greeting card with my gift and all I would do is put one of those stickers on his present. You know the To: CJ FROM: Jessica… at least I would cross out the From and put Love: Jessica, but that was nothing compared to his eloquent cards. I am sure my parents thought the same when they compared by small sticker tag to his glorious cards. Can you believe, he even gave me Mother’s Day cards the past two years because he was so proud of the mother I am to his nephew. He was just so thoughtful. Oh, how I will miss those cards.

In fact, somewhere along the way, it was like he became the older brother always taking care of me…. And he would always say that to tease me, but I loved it. He was the one person in the world that I always thought would be there for me. No matter what curve balls life could throw at me. My parents ingrained in our heads, that through thick and thin “we would always have each other”. They wanted us to know that the bond we had was unlike anything else.

When we were younger, we just found this to be kind of irritating, especially if we were arguing, but as we got older we knew how right they were. He knew how much I loved him, and I know how much he loved me.

Right now, I am uncertain how I will go on living with out him in my life, but I know I will and I know I have to. He would want nothing less than to see me, to see my parents, to see all of us thrive because that is what he did.

He was so loved, by so many and now I can see how many and let me just say WOW. This…makes my heart smile just a bit, in a time of unbearable sadness. You… all of you help me, help my parents, help each other go on. I look out to all of you and I know that CJ will never die. I know that he will live in each one of us. The impression he has made on all of us will not be lost. Thank you for being here to celebrate the life of my brother.

And Pbear, my love for you is immeasurable. You are part of me and always will be. There will not be a day that goes by that I will not miss you, but I will work hard to make you proud of me. Please be with me as I go forward in a life that seems uncertain and scary. I need my brother with me as you always have been. I can’t wait to laugh with you again in heaven. I love you…