T.O. Writes Children’s Book…Paris Hilton Opens Daycare

HLS has uncovered the real reason behind Terrell Owen’s recent suicide attempt…to promote his new children’s book of course. Yes, you read that right, man-child role-model Terrell Owens is writing a children’s book titled Little T Learns To Share. Soon to be bankrupt publiser, BenBella Books, had this to say about the project:

“The book uses adorable illustrations and rhyming text to show one boy learning to share his new football with friends” as a means of “sharing with children the lessons he didn’t learn as a child (and has had to painfully acquire as an adult).”

And for the 2 parents out there who are psychotic enough to let their children read this book…fret not, this is only the first book in the T.O.’s Timeout Series. Other upcoming books in the series (and this is no joke) include Little T Learns What Not to Say and Little T Learns To Say I’m Sorry. At the time of this writing it could not determine if Owen’s has been inspired to begin writing by former teammate Donovan McNabb…whose autobiography he called a “children’s book”.