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Archive | September 2014

19 years ago this summer, my life was saved by gratitude. Sound dramatic? It’s not. I was suicidal. Years of trying to please everybody came to a head when the important people in my life created an impasse they couldn’t resolve, forcing me to take a side. Have an opinion. Oh, help. (Why can’t we all just get along?) Of course, I’m oversimplifying. This blog isn’t about other people’s problems, but they were big and they were real. It would take me years to realize that the problem was mine. Living to please others isn’t just unhealthy; it’s actually impossible.

But I was young, sincere and ignorant. Gratitude stepped in when knowledge and sophistication weren’t available. In the depths of a very dark depression, I found that I could choose sanity. One day at a time. Find one thing to be grateful for. Like, “I can breathe today.” Sometimes that’s all there was.

“I have shoes.”

“Look at the sky.”

“My kids are healthy.” (Or, “my kids are alive.”)

It saved my life. One step at a time I walked out of depression, and I haven’t been suicidal almost 17 years now.

My life is dramatically different these days, but gratitude is such a simple thing. It can nourish a soul. Protect a mind.