Sep

25

Philly Edge points to the horrifying mascots for Quinto, the Pennsylvania Lottery’s new twice-daily pick five game. The lottery is drawing some flak for them — but from anti-gambling advocates, not parents’ groups worried about the five giant penises walking around.

I believe the protesters against a Gallery casino will be very successful if they dress up like this. Either way, though, there’s still gonna be gambling on Market East.

More images after the jump.

Clearly, the mascots had no idea what to do with their hands and somehow settled on “We’re #1.”

The expression on #4’s face is incredibly creepy. I think these things are what Teletubbies become when they grow up.

And is anyone surprised this doofus is a Mets fan? Okay, glad we’re all on the same page here.

Oh, I see, it’s supposed to be five fingers. The lottery’s new mascots are severed fingers. Who knew we would one day yearn for the simpler era of Gus, the second most-famous groundhog in Pennsylvania. (Note: That makes him still rather unknown. A comment on Yahoo! Answers: “Punxatawny [sic] Phil is THE groundhog and has been for many years. Never heard of Gus.”)

Like the department stores on Market Street of old, patrons of the Gallery dress in their finest attire when shopping.

Also: No Gus dolls? A travesty. Solution: Does the state own the copyright to Gus? They could have him do a tourism campaign. People actually like him, and for a character on TV all the time he’s not horribly annoying. He’s certainly more palatable than, say, Tony Kornheiser. It’s a win for everyone.

Gus, unlike Kornheiser, is more annoying on radio. Chris Wheeler is annoying on both.

HIG Says:

Sep 25 6:28 PM

The PA Lottery Commission owns Gus. They paid upwards of $100,000 to have him designed and built. On the Gus commercials, there is a team of five operators and a stylist. You’ll be seeing plenty of Gus in future “Keep on Scratchin’” commercials.