Commonsense use of body language

When using body language as a way to interpret someone’s motives, use your head, your commonsense and be clever about it.

Arm yourself with as much information as possible.

Be sensible.

It can very easily happen that you see things that you want to see instead of what are in reality going on. Wishful thinking can be dangerous if you let it overrule commonsense and reality.

Follow the suggestion below to make sure that your are not making the mistake of misreading the signals your are seeing:

Use your common sense

Although reading someone’s body language is a very good indicator of their true feelings, it can be fallible. If you misinterpret something or only see what you want to see, it can backfire on you. Be sensible and trust your gut feelings. If you inner voice is making warning noises – listen.

Look for “clusters”

A single eyebrow-lift or a bit of preening in absence of anything else is meaningless. Look for at least four positive but separate signals (at the same time) before you attach any meaning to it.

Ideally you’ll want a broad smile, shiny eyes with diluted pupils, preening and invasion of you space combined with some accidental-on-purpose-touching.

Know when to give up

Unfortunately we can’t make someone like us. If you did all the moves and send all the right signals a couple of times and still received nothing back – move on.

It just wasn’t meant to be. Do not take it personally. Be sensible and rather use your time and emotional energy on someone that is worth it.