If the Cabinet revolt against Gordon Brown ever comes, it will be led by Whassisname, Thingy, No Idea and Roger Daltrey from The Who.

John Denham, the Secretary of State for Innovation, Universities and Skills, caused particular confusionPhoto: GETTY

By Adam Lusher

2:58PM BST 20 Sep 2008

At least it will be in the minds of the people of Manchester, which yesterday began hosting the Labour Party conference.

A Sunday Telegraph survey found that when shown photographs of Cabinet ministers, very few people in the city could name them.

Our findings suggest that commentators demanding strong leadership and backbenchers clamouring for Cabinet "big beasts" to topple Gordon Brown have missed one vital problem. Such is the charisma of Britain's ministers, hardly anyone has the foggiest idea who they are.

Of 40 people questioned, none could put names to photographs of all 23 Cabinet ministers. Only one managed to recognise more than half of them.

Most struggled once they had named Gordon Brown and "Chancellor Whassisname …. Eyebrows Darling".

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Four accused The Sunday Telegraph of simply showing them photographs of "random people", with one 19-year-old student insisting: "You have just been taking photographs of strangers."

John Denham, the Secretary of State for Innovation, Universities and Skills, caused particular confusion.

He was recognised by nobody. Among the more despairing but creative suggestions as to his identity were Roger Daltrey [the lead singer of the rock group The Who], Sir Alex Ferguson [the manager of Manchester United Football Club], "My old primary school headmaster", and "err, a sunburnt Paddy Ashdown"?

A total of seven ministers – nearly a third of the Cabinet - went unrecognised by all surveyed: Mr Denham, Baroness Ashton, the Leader of the House of Lords, Douglas Alexander, the International Development Secretary, Andy Burnham, the Culture Secretary, Shaun Woodward, the Northern Ireland Secretary, Paul Murphy, the Welsh Secretary, and John Hutton, the Business Secretary.

The nearest anyone came to identifying Mr Murphy was when Charlie Colwell, 49, a bank worker, suggested: "He has something of the Barry Humphries about him."

Baroness Ashton usually elicited the comment "absolutely no idea", but Cal Difalco, 22, a cycle courier, managed to confuse her with Edwina Currie, the former Conservative health minister, and Mandy Rice-Davies, the woman at the centre of the 1960s Profumo scandal.

"It's thingy Rice," he declared, "The one who was playing away with John Major."

Mr Darling was named by 29 people. This meant that during a major economic crisis the Chancellor of the Exchequer was no more recognisable than Robin Cook, the former Foreign Secretary, who has been dead for three years.

David Miliband, the Foreign Secretary, who faced rumours of a leadership challenge this summer, was recognised 13 times, but no fewer than three people thought he was Nick Clegg, the leader of the Liberal Democrats.

Even when they had actually met ministers, people struggled. Outside the town hall, one Manchester City Council worker admitted: "I met her when she came in the other week. She's tiny. I know she's the Salford MP, but I can't name her."

She was, of course, describing Hazel Blears, the Communities and Local Government Secretary. Unfortunately she was looking at a photograph of Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary.

The picture of the real Ms Blears produced just a blank look.

Miss Smith was named only six times, making her less than half as recognisable as her predecessor Charles Clarke, identified by 13 people.

Despite her close involvement in law and order, the Home Secretary was unknown even to Matt Partington, 22, a Police Community Support Officer.

"I know the face," he insisted, "But not the name."

Despite representing nearby Stalybridge and Hyde, James Purnell, the Secretary of State for Work and Pensions was recognised only four times, with one man suggesting: "He's a bit like Ricky [the less than bright character] from EastEnders".

Ed Balls, the Secretary of State for Children, Schools and Families, was recognised five times and only once accused of being John Leslie, the television presenter whose career was ended by sex and drugs scandals.

The only person identified by everybody was Gordon Brown.

David Egerton, 52, an internet marketing manager, explained, however: "He is known, but not admired."

Mark Megginson, 29, suggested: "The reason everybody knows him and so few of the others is because so much is directly attributed to Gordon Brown. He is bearing the brunt of people's frustrations."

It was not all good news for the opposition. Six people failed to name David Cameron. Nick Clegg told his party conference on Wednesday [SEP 17] that he was "heading for Government". He might need to tell people who he is first.

Only ten people – a quarter of those surveyed – could put a name to his photograph. Among the incorrect suggestions were "a younger [Michael] Portillo", "Some Conservative, maybe a Labour bloke", and – most damaging of all – "One of Dave's sidekicks".