75% deaf, 100% dope

Most of these lists begin with mammals, African animals, Indian animals or animals of the Amazon. Not my list. I’m starting my Very Dangerous Animals segment with insects and arachnids. Insects themselves make up over 90% of all living animals so they pretty much rule the earth. They live by the motto: “We don’t die, we multiply.”

RED BACK SPIDER (Australia)

Red Back Spider (Australia)

This pea-sized little critter packs a nasty bite and enough venom to cause you and I some serious harm. If you think it looks a lot like a black widow spider, it’s because they’re cousins. The red back is Australian while its cousin is American but both are harmful to humans.

Lonomia Obliqua Caterpillar (South America)

Aren’t caterpillars supposed to be squishy and nice? This one isn’t. If it injects enough venom, you’ll die within 15 hours. That’s rare, however, this isn’t the caterpillar you want to play show and tell with. It’s furry, yes, but not cute and furry. DO NOT TOUCH.

Fat-tail Scorpion (West & North Africa to the Middle East)

The fat-tail scorpion comes in many sizes and colors but one thing they all have in common is a bad ass sting. While it would take a lot of venom from a fat-tail’s stinger to kill an adult human, it could potentially kill a child. When provoked, the fat-tail scorpion will cop an attitude and sting your annoying ass so leave it alone!

Bullet Ant (South America)

Because it’s considered the most painful sting of all insects according the Schmidt Sting Pain index, the bullet ant has earned an infamous reputation. Sometimes more than an inch long, they look like wingless wasps but their sting is more powerful than that of their cousins (wasps and bees). The good news is that unless you’re planning a trip to the Central American rain forests, you have no chance of ever coming across the well-named bullet ant.

More dangerous, bad-ass, don’t-fuck-with-me animals are a’coming so be on the lookout for Very Dangerous Animals 2