For nearly two decades now, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to head off the end of times, but declines to quietly cede to SI the scoop on the biggest event in world history.

Here's SI's Sign of the Apocalypse this week:

The Bakersfield (Calif.) Condors minor league hockey team originally billed its Dec. 27 game against the Stockton Thunder as Our City Isn't Bankrupt Night - a reference to Stockton's filing for Chapter 9 protection in June - then, after complaints of insensitivity, changed the name to Bakersfield Boom Night.

Minor league hockey team theme-night revisions might indeed be the Fifth Horseman. Likewise, Deadspin noted all manner of apocalyptic happenings during the week. The Dayton Daily News' deep document dive that showed Ohio State president Gordon Gee has expensed $64,000 in bow-tie related piffle in five years. The revelation that the scab ref who gifted the Seahawks a win on Monday night might already be expecting payment for interviews. ESPN didn't notice that Falcons safety Thomas DeCoud meow-gamed his way through an on-air interview.