Everyone knows that smartphones are a hot target of thieves these days. They even have a special name for techniques used to snag iPhones from unsuspecting victims. But you know what nobody is stealing these days? Flip phones. Well, aside from the out-of-touch criminal who is still all about the Motorola RAZR, I suppose.

This case by Thumbs Up UK turns your iPhone into a flip phone, adding a big 'ole top lid and thick plastic casing. I can't imagine anyone would be looking to pilfer this from your bag or dashboard, so it might do a good job of curbing the trend of iPhone thefts for anyone who lives in an area where such things are common.

Unfortunately, it's apparently a total piece of junk. To be totally clear: I have never touched one of these cases myself. I was going to order one of these goofy cases just for fun, but I can't find a single satisfied customer anyone on the web. Customer reviews are all totally scathing, noting horrible build quality and, predictably, complaining about the size.

The size arguments are of course a bit silly, since the point is to make it look like a gigantic communications device from yesteryear, but stories of the device literally falling apart are definitely worrisome. So unless there's an Internet conspiracy to keep this case from selling, it's not worth the US$20 it would take to get it to my doorstep.

If a seasoned iPhone accessory maker would put some thought into a case like this, we might come away with a functional, theft-reducing piece of hardware. Until then, I guess making my iPhone look like an old eight-track tape will have to do.