Remember trying to consume the entirety of The Great Gatsby on the day of the reading exam while your heart fluttered like a hummingbird and your palms sweated so hard you could barely hold onto the book? No? You were a better student than I.

Had I had Spritz, reading’s new game-changer, I might have saved myself some anxiety. Spritz Technology Inc. is a startup created by a network of people in Salt Lake City, Utah and Munich Germany who want to bring speed-reading to the masses.

Here’s a convenient visual aide.

According to the company, reading is so time consuming because of the eye movements (called “saccades”) from word to word and line to line on the page.

Our brains don’t need to internally vocalize each word. Just seeing a set of characters alerts our minds to the meaning. Turnip. You understood that nonsensical and contextually erroneous word before you even knew you did. You actively delayed your conscious understanding by sounding it out in your mind. SCIENCE!

By fast streaming one word at a time at 250 to 1,000 words per minute speeds (holy crap), you’re allowing your initial understanding of each word to do the work for you. In addition, there are no time-wasting eyeball movements to be done. Thus, you can read The Great Gatsby in an hour or less and kick ass on your exam, and still have time to sneak out the window the night before to see that questionable boyfriend your parents hate. Just me, again? Moving on.

The software provides each word’s “Optimal Recognition Point” (ORP) in red and in the place of the reading space that your eye is already looking. Your eyes find this point faster, which means faster understanding. According to Spritz, only 20% of our time is spent processing the content. The other 80% is all bull. Essentially, the software cuts the excess and limits our activity to processing and nothing else. Hella awesome. So much time for activities. Wanna try it? READY, GO!

OMGZ LET’S GO FASTER!

Continue if you think you’ve got the chops, kid.

Spritzing can be done by anyone, but the company does extend apologies to “babies, people who do not possess the ability to raise their eyelids, people who live in caves, people without digital devices of any kind, people who have had their digital devices taken away and been put in “time out” by mom and dad, sleeping people, zombies, cartoon characters, scuba divers, people without heartbeats (i.e. dead people)”. I’m LOLing. These guys, I like them.

Spritzing will also benefit readers with disabilities such as dyslexia and ADD. Thank goodness, because my ADD is starting to inhibit my ability to finish Fifty Shades of Grey. I’m kidding, I wouldn’t read that. Mostly because I’m too busy checking Facebook to get any reading done.