Do you feel you could just cower quietly in the corner, work hard and slip out at the end without his respect?

Or do you feel it is too important to view your learning simply as customer service once it has been paid for?

I ask because I am currently in a tangle with 2 clubs and feel that my instructor of approx 2 years is disappointed with me.

The background being that I left `my club` due to injury and recently enquired about joining fees. while waiting to hear back I found a super cheap club where the instructor just wants to keep his doors open. Joined it then heard back from old club. I am currently attending both and have been open and honest with both but feel the change and have lost his eye contact and words of greeting.

I know what to do but wonder how many of you could attend a club where you have now become a number, having once been a respected patron.

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Those are my principles, and if you don`t like them...well, I have others.

Just need to add, are they the same style of Martial Arts that you are learning from both Instructors?

Regards Cheapest, I charge just enough to cover the costs as I've ran a not for profit Dojo for over a decade. But I don't consider mine as being lower quality. I'm not a belt factory and will fail or delay gradings if the student isn't upto standards.

If you are training in the same style at both Dojo's I would suggest picking 1 of the to and concentrate on that as there will be issues occuring due to the suttle differences in some or many of the techniques.

Does the Original (Please "Respect me") Instructor know about the other school you attend, as this could be a factor in it?

Also, I find if an Instructor can't give his/her time to his students then I he's lost touch with the art he/she teaches and is more in tune with the business side of it.

In the end, no matter how much guidance you get here, you need to be happy with your decision as to where you go from here, but accept the path you choose and enjoy your journey

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A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.

Do you portray yourself as a worthy Sensei of said respect to start with?Are you humble and peaceful or do you come across as arrogant and cocky etc.? Consider it as are you a Miyagi Sensei or a CobraKai Sensei?

How do YOU view your students training?

If its "just business" to YOU then why would you care what the dude/dudette that trains with you thinks about you?

Its a 2 way thing, an instructor can feel betrayed as if he/she has dedicated their time to your training then you move on and look elsewhere it can be a big hit to the "ego" of the Instructor (although for me as long as it doesn't affect the individual's skill level I'm actually honoured)

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A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.

To me personally respect counts enormously as I need to be fully relaxed and able to focus entirely on the technique being taught. I am also of the `old school` train of thought.

I know what I need to do, I just balk at the thought of it as numbers are vital to one teacher to keep his doors open.

Both teachers are excellent. The first offered me concessions on prices (not currently working) so I fully understand how I have caused offence.

Due to constraints both time and financial I can, and only will, attend one - it will be my original school.

It DOES affect my training as they are two different MA so this is also an issue, as if time, money and respect were not enough!

I know what to do. I will do it but did want to hear what others feel (this would not alter what I feel I just wanted to contribute a thread). Its not an interesting conversation to have with a friend who does not study MA as they cannot see any dilemma or issue of respect.

Again thanks for your comments and it would be great to hear from other instructors as Dobbersky has added.

Edited by jabber (06/11/1306:24 AM)

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Those are my principles, and if you don`t like them...well, I have others.

First thing I’d say is that I see no reason for your instructor not to show you respect for joining another club. You say that you have been open and honest about what you want and where you have been training, therefor I think your Sensei is out of order in being disrespectful. Sounds like you have shown respect and also dedicated 2 years of MA training with them, paying all fees, trusting and training hard no doubt.

I actually think that it is very important to have the respect of your instructor and can’t personally imagine training long-term without it.

I think the nature of MA (and sport in general) often requires a mutual respect to get the most out of both parties. For example we often hear of football coaches getting the sack as they have ‘lost the dressing room’.

This ties in to a motivational POV too. Will your sensei get that extra 10% out of you when tired etc.

Cxt said

Quote:

I don't really care what the guy that paints my house thinks about me--its a BUSINESS transaction--I pay my good hard earned money for the delivery of a marketed service

2 problems here.If the guy who painted your house was disrespectful, would you really be a returning customer. Most business at least attempt to have good customer service.

Secondly MA is a hobby or a passion. You should be going to enjoy yourself There are enough clubs around to find a place with good people.

For me respect from your Sensei is very important, sets an example to everyone in the class, allows a good and safe learning environment, allows an enjoyable experience.

Jabber, out of interest can you explain why you decided to go with the sensei who does not respect you?

I tend to agree with you.....but to be honest....if we are talking BUSINESS...then no....if the guy that paints my house is good enough at his job...if he is better than the other painters around....then I really don't care about his attitude. He is there to paint my house---not to be my buddy.

I work with all kinds of people that I would not have over for Sunday brunch or invite out for drinks....but they are extremely good at their jobs.

Your right though, good customer service is important and disrespect is BAD customer service.

Edited by cxt (06/11/1312:17 PM)

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I did battle with ignorance today.......and ignorance won.
Huey.