Cheer Perfectionfinally returns to TV tonight. What’s that? You have no idea what Cheer Perfection is or why I’m so excited? Well let me back-up the child abuse truck and give you the 411 on this amazing show. It stars real live parents supporting their real live children at a competitive cheer camp. And before you start to fall asleep at the though of watching small children tumble, let me tell you the best part…the parents are insane.

Because of course they are. Tell me the last time you watched a reality TV show and thought to yourself, “these are healthy and well-adjusted parents who are not at all vicariously living through their children.” Probably never right? Sure, sure, sure, there’s always one parent that seems normal, but that’s only relative to the other crazies.

Here’s the thing you always have to remember: good parents don’t put their kids on TV. They just don’t. No matter how “badly the kids want it” or how much money the kids “will save for college.” The negatives always out weigh the positives when it comes to reality TV. That’s obviously what makes it so fun to watch as viewer, but so horrible to participate in as a child.

So with that in mind, I’ve taken it up upon myself to rank the best shows that highlight abusive parenting on TV.

Kris Jenner might be the devil’s evil stepmother, but at least she’s given her children careers. Do they deserve those careers? Absolutely not. But it’s not the worst gift that a mother can give her child. So while we certainly feel punished by their success, I can’t say that Kris actively destroy’s her children’s well being.

While this show seemed outrageous when it it aired in 2004, it now just seems meh. So what? A few parents push their children into careers, despite their children not having the talent or the drive to do it. Thankfully for these kids, reality TV kicked it up a notch in the ’10s and aired 1400 more offensive shows. Meaning these kids can safely fade into obscurity and not be reminded about this embarrassment every day of their lives. Although, fine, I do sometimes let myself wonder what Shane Klingensmith is up to now now.

This is Dance Moms lite. Sure the parents are just as competitive and crazy and all around unhinged, but their cheer routines aren’t anywhere near as inappropriate as Abby Lee Miller’s dance routines. So minus ten points for never putting their kids in outfits that are meant to make them look naked.

If these parents were living any more vicariously through their children, they’d be inside of them. Just right up inside their little bodies — doing their age-inappropriate dances on stage and stopping themselves from crying when the hot curler burns their ears and convincing themselves that winning a $500 dollar scholarship makes the whole thing worth it. Even though we all know that getting ready for that pageant cost $1000 and they therefore lost $500. Seriously try doing the math on this show without getting a headache.

While there will be plenty of traumatic moments for these kids to look back on — and I do mean literally look back on thanks to this show being on DVD — the worst will definitely be their father prancing around town with Michael Lohanwhile wearing Ed Hardy. Ugh, could he be a more atrocious human being?

Any parent that exposes their children to Abby Lee Millerdoesn’t deserve their children. And yes, that includes Holly. Actually, especially Holly. As the most educated parent there, she should pull her kid off that show and put her in a dance program where the director isn’t an outright racist. I know that it might all be for the cameras, but it’s still probably not all that good for a 10-year-old to be taken down by a middle-aged woman on the reg.

Giving your children all J names is stupid. Denying your children a chance to succeed in any world is pretty cruel. But putting your daughters in long denim skirts and acting like that’s anywhere near okay should get all 19 of their children taken away. Even Josh — he actually might need the most help from the outside world. Oh and as always, #FreeJinger.

Remember that time that CBS aired a reality show based on Lord of the Flies. You know the one where they filmed kids aged 8-15 running a town all by themselves to see what would happen? No? You probably blocked it out of your head because WHAT WERE THE ADULTS THINKING? OMG, come on humans, we’re better than that. I think? Actually based on this list, maybe not. Maybe this show just came too early on in the whole “let’s see how much we can harm young children” reality TV show trend.

Okay these aren’t reality shows, but the reality of their after effects is enough that they made the top spot on this list. Do me a favor real quick and name one Disney star who emerged from the Disney machine unscathed. And don’t say Hilary Duff. Don’t you dare say it. She’s totally normaled out now (and has an adorable kid to boot), but she did spend her teen years in a love triangle with Aaron Carter and Lindsay Lohan. That’s gotta scar someone for life. So ring a ding ding, if you see a parent entering an audition for a Disney Channel show with their kids, call child services.

The moms on Toddlers and Tiaras are the real-life versions of Amy Poehler’s character in Mean Girls.

Also, that GIF from Kid Nation has a very special place in my heart because it is glorious.

Cassandra Hough

You’ll be relieved to know that the representation Abby Lee Miller is 100% accurate. My cousin and her friends took dance lessons there for years (we’re just so proud of her here in Pittsburgh) and they’ve all said she’s just as terrifying and inappropriate as they remember!

Jenni

That’s so, so scary

ChiChi

I knew someone’s little sister who went there, and Abby Lee Miller made them say that she was just being rude ‘for the camera’. I recently moved from Pittsburgh, and all anyone asks me is if I knew her. Oh, yeah, we were bff’s. Not.

Jenni

It’s such a shame that she’s Pittsburgh claim to fame now

ChiChi

It really is. It really is. What happened to the Steelers? CMU? The point?

Jenni

Really anything besides Abby Lee Miller’s rundown dance studio

ChiChi

I know! I know!

Cassandra Hough

We just pretend it isn’t happening. Which is easy to do since the studio is in one of the crappier suburbs of the city.

Jenni

Does it really look that rundown still? I never understand why it looks abandoned in that one outside shot they always use.

I always found it funny that Jon and Kate claimed they were doing it for the kids and to “collect memories”. I wanted to collect memories of my son too. So I bought a camcorder.

There’s a damned good reason that most eight and six year olds in normal families aren’t allowed to be the last word in family decisions- because if you left it up to them, they’d choose to eat candy every day and never get baths. And if your kids miss every moment of their lives being filmed, then perhaps having the cameras turned off is a smart option. The sextuplets are nine now- and according to two of them, they still get followed around in public by fans of the show. The show’s been off the air for years. Why would you expose your kids to that kind of long-range scrutiny? So far, the Gosselin kids seem like they’ve turned out all right, but I’d be surprised if this didn’t affect them negatively in the long run.

Jenni

It’s not even the long range scrutiny that they got exposed to, it their parents long and drawn out divorce that probably caused even more damage to them. Jon allegedly wrote a book about Kate being a fraud. In what world will that be good for the eight children he has with her.

whiteroses

Of course. I still think the fact that they allowed the entire world to witness all that (and I mean literally the ENTIRE WORLD- my Australian in-laws know who these people are) is what’s going to damage them more than anything else, imho.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Boy do you ever have a contemptuous view of children.

whiteroses

I’m not sure how it’s contemptuous to believe that kids shouldn’t be on a reality show, especially if they’re too young to make decisions that will affect the rest of their lives. And I’m not sure if you saw the show- but it started out being popular because the kids were cute. They were filmed in nearly every aspect of their lives, including being potty trained. Diaper blowouts were recorded right along with family trips. As the kids got older, the show got popular because it gave everyone in America a ringside seat to watch while their parent’s marriage imploded, something that nobody would have been interested in if not for Jon and Kate’s aggressive self- promotion. On the backs of their kids, natch.

It’s exploitation.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

That wasn’t what I found contemptuous. Read over the rest of what you said about children. Here’s your quote from your reply: ” A parent’s job, as I see it, is to make sure a kid stays a kid as long as possible.”

The question Bruno Bettleheim used to ask his mother’s group when he started with them was, “What kind of adult do you wish your child to become?” That’s not exactly it but generally how you wish your children to grow up. NOT how to keep them a kid as long as possible. Your sentence is the road to the way of “infantilizing” a child.

I don’t want to get into this with you so I would suggest you read John Holt’s work. There is a webpage in memorial sort of on him.Alice Miller is another one. But only if you want more options for children. Kristen Stewart is a good example of a mother who didn’t interfere with her child’s choices even when she was very young. Fassbinder the great German director had parents who were disciples of Rudolph Steiner and he has said that he was making all his own choices by age 4. By 30 he left a body of work greater than the lifework of most great film directors.

whiteroses

I’ve always raised my son with a view towards the fact that one day, he will be an adult. Which means that, even at a year old, he knows that there are certain things that he can’t get away with. Hitting is not allowed in our home, spankings or otherwise, mostly because even at this age he needs to know that it’s not acceptable. We’ve started to teach him to clean up his own toys. It’s not much, but it’s definitely a start.

Conversely, if a child is given the responsibility to make major FAMILY decisions- as in, ones that also affect the parents- and then the parents bleat about their kid’s lost childhood (as Jon and Kate did), they have no one to blame but themselves. There was a lot of complaints from both the Gosselins about how their kids were affected by media scrutiny- and the main thing that they could have done to prevent that (turning off the cameras) was the one thing that Kate Gosselin wasn’t willing to do. Your average six or an eight year old doesn’t have the emotional or mental maturity to make major, life-changing decisions for themselves, let alone anyone else. If a sixteen year old isn’t considered mature enough to vote, a six year old shouldn’t decide where and how his or her family lives. I’ve been a teacher my entire professional life, and I can tell you that 99% of the eight year olds you will meet are absolutely incapable of taking care of themselves without an adult’s help.

I’ve read both Holt and Miller. “The Drama of the Gifted Child” is a genuinely interesting read. I’ve also read Henrik Goldszmit (aka Janusz Korczak- and if you’re not familiar with him you probably should be). I still don’t believe that children should be the head of a family. Fassbinder was a genius, so you really can’t compare him to your average kid. He also died at 37 due to a drug overdose. He had a personal life that could euphemistically be referred to as “turbulent”. And yes, his star burned bright professionally, but at a pretty hefty price, in my opinion.

I believe in personal responsibility. Which is why I don’t believe that children should be paraded like circus animals so the entire world can see every tiny detail of how they grow up. Parents exist so that a child has someone to teach and guide them. A six year old is very capable of making decisions, but you’ll hardly see them running Fortune 500 companies.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Dakota Fanning was “running a Fortune 500″ company when she was a child. She saw all the pitches alone and made her decisions by herself. She was around 6. Her famly moved to CA because she wanted to be an actress. That was a big family decision made because that was what she wanted.

I have taught 6-8 year olds that were far more perceptive and articulate than you are. I see you know how to wiki tho. That’s a good thing.

whiteroses

All right. If you meet a 6 year old who’s in charge of a tech firm, an oil drilling company, or an energy group, then I am proven wrong. Most sixth graders who aren’t in the entertainment industry don’t have that kind of power. That’s pretty illuminating, imo. Having worked as a teacher, as I said, for my entire professional life– I read quite a lot, and what I read includes but is not limited to books and articles that are the exact opposite of my own educational theories. I believe children need guidance, and if you are a parent it is your responsibility to provide that guidance.

I applaud you for knowing so much about me in such a short span of time with such a small amount of information. I, at least, can disagree with someone without insulting them. I won’t respond to any further comments you leave in this “discussion”, since arguing on the Internet is a lot like mud wrestling- even when you “win”, you’re still covered in mud. Enjoy your “win”. As far as I’m concerned, this conversation is over.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Well, Mozart composed symphonies at 6 years that no adults have ever rivaled. It depends on what category you put children in determines how you perceive them and in turn how you relate to them.

whiteroses

Fine. Just for kicks and giggles.

All children have unlimited potential. But not all of them can get 9-5 jobs, rent apartments, drive cars, or do all that other “adult” stuff. You’re talking about Fassbinder, Dakota Fanning, and Mozart as if they are the rule, rather than the exception. Your AVERAGE six year old boy is more concerned with playing with Legos versus playing piano. And if you’re arguing against adult guidance, Mozart isn’t the best example to choose. You find what your kid is good at and nurture it. You don’t throw them into the deep end of life and expect them to float.

If your argument is that children have total mental and emotional control (similar to the way most adults do) then I’m just speaking in circles.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

I’m not talking about that at all. I am just saying that if our culture – parenting conditioning – did not limit their possibilities then they wouldn’t have to spend their formative years being numbskulled bored or frittering away in front of the TV or video games to make it bearable. Who knows what would happen to the human race if we did not hold them back. Adult jobs? In praise of work? That’s a myth too. A capitalistic myth.

whiteroses

Capitalistic or not- money is still used in our society. And unless you want to sleep on a park bench somewhere, someone has to earn it. Dakota Fanning holds an adult job, for example.
You’re assuming a lot about the parenting skills of people you don’t know.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

A blessing.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

So what kind of adult would you like your son to be? What is your fantasy of his future? What is his fantasy of his future? Have you asked?

whiteroses

Since he’s a year old, as I made clear in my comment, no, I haven’t. At this point, his plans for his future are eating, sleeping and crawling across the floor. As his mother, it’s my job to shape and guide that future. At this point that’s a small job. As he gets older, it will require more work on my part.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Ah if you were doing sign language he would be talking to you by now. At age 6 months they do IF you sign with them.You could start now tho.

whiteroses

He has a thirty four word vocabulary (four more than I did at his age) and speaks in complete sentences when he chooses to do so. “Mommy, read please,” is a very common sentence around our house.

I find it humorous that you assume my son can’t speak— based on what evidence, exactly?

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Conversation not just words. And I am not judging your son. I am just saying you are very limited in your aspirations for children.

whiteroses

And, again- how do you know that?

My son- like all children- can do whatever he chooses to. I won’t limit him. And I’ll do the best I can do to make sure that he lives up to his full potential. But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s still a child.

NickNack

Tia & Tamara Mowry turned out fine. As did Raven Simone, and Hilary Duff like you mentioned (she was what like 16 when that Aaron Carter thing went down? A lot of people had stupid tiffs like that over boys in high school, and Lindsay Lohan wasn’t the person then that she has been).
Selena Gomez is fine. I mean, she dated Justin Bieber, but she’s not been arrested, or sent to rehab, or gotten into a fight, or anything like that. Christy Carlson Romano from Even Stevens, and Kim Possible is engaged and still working, but you never see her in the headlines for crazy stuff.
Ashley Tisdale seems to be a functioning member of society, and so does Zac Efron. Kirsten Storms from Zenon is married and expecting her first child, no arrests or bad publicity there that I can think of. Aly & AJ Mishalka haven’t been up to any shenanigans.
I mean I know you said name one, and I may have gone a little overboard here, but I don’t think it’s fair to blame Disney. Plenty of their stars haven’t been in trouble, or controversial. It’s just the ones that are in the headlines for all the wrong reasons, overshadow the normal ones that are just trying to continue their careers.
The ones that do act out are going through a pretty typical rebellion stage where they are trying to prove they are adults, and shed their family friendly Disney image. Demi Lovato said that she got teased for being on the Disney Channel so she felt she had to do stupid things to prove she was a bad ass. That’s not Disney’s fault. Disney is Disney, everyone knows the type of stuff they produce, even the kids.

Jenni

Sister, Sister wasn’t a Disney show. But you do have a point with Raven. Disney pimped her out hard and she did seem to escape unscathed. While Christy Carlson Romano’s doing well, Disney never really worked hard to make her a star like Hilary Duff and Miley Cyrus — which is probably for the best in retrospect.

I don’t count Kristen or Ashley due to the fact that they were in movies and not on shows. I think you can probably do a movie for a few months a year and turn out fine. After all, movie kids can still go to school and be around children their own age for most of they year. Show kids live and breathe the Hollywood lifestyle.

Also I’m not blaming Disney….I’m blaming parents who put their kids in these environments and don’t take the necessary precautions to make sure they’re okay. With that said, I don’t think Disney has their stars mental health and emotional development in mind when they’re packaging them.

NickNack

You said to name one, and I named more than one. Just because they weren’t on TV shows doesn’t mean they don’t count as Disney stars. Especially if that’s where they got their start or the most recognition. Raven Symone, and the others I mentioned, with the exception of Tia and Tamara, where all on Disney, and are fine. I lumped Sister, Sister in there because I used to watch it on the Disney Channel, and a child star is a child star. They all face essentially the same pressure regardless of what network they are on. Also, they did try with Christy Carlson Romano. She made music videos on the Disney Channel, was in a big hit with the series Even Stevens, and they casted her as Belle in the Broadway version of Beauty & the Beast. When I was younger, she was everywhere on that channel. I fully believe they tried just as hard to make her a star as Hilary Duff, but she just didn’t take off like Hilary did. I disagree with you and your statement that you’re not blaming Disney. In your above article you say if a parent is spotted taking their child to a Disney audition, to call CPS which suggests that the child is doomed, regardless of parenting. I do think the parents, and the people that the children surround themselves with are a huge influence, and I think the networks care more about the kids than you would think, because they are making money from them, and they don’t want them to implode. It’s like any other job. You come to work, you get paid. Except this is in regards to children, and it’s up to the parents, not the network, to make sure the kids are well adjusted. It’s a high pressure environment, because it’s show business. It’s competitive in nature, that’s the way it’s been, that’s the way it always will be. Hollywood is a business. I’m not saying they should run a Hollywood equivalent to a sweat shop, because they absolutely shouldn’t, I’m just saying that the parents are responsible for their children. They should keep an eye on what’s going down.

MCR

We should forget underage drinking and smoking and just focus all public service information on getting parents to put a lock on their TV until their kids are 18.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Been wanting to reply to you at knotted up but am banned and am not being saved this time I guess. Oh well.They have no sense of humor those Rob fans. Poor Rob to be saddled with them.

MCR

Blacklisted again! You must hold some kind of record.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Fuck yeah. I encountered the idiot brigade. They did it when I gave up trying to be rational with them and made fun of them in an ironic way. starlight gives them too much power.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

A quote of yours so I hope jenni doesn’t mind.

“Suppose doing something like this commercial helps change the direction his career was taking; or puts it more under his personal control; or even if it provides additional financial security …”

The problem with the Dior ad is that it is so very cliched. It also reinforces what he says he has been trying to get away from, that sexy image versus being an actor. Not being exploited for his looks, and then he does it again and chooses the same thing he says he doesn’t want. Dior was a great couturier house started by Christian Dior. In 1946 or 47 Yves St. Laurent was brought in after World War II to be the chief designer and he came out with the New Look after the war. Longer skirts as short skirts saved material during the war and during the depression before it. St Laurent was 19 at the time and he set Paris in its ears. St Laurent left to form his own house. Dior has gone through several designers since. It is a corporate entity now as most of them are, No longer houses of impeccable taste and trend setting. Now Dior needed a new face and image and personality to embody them. They have already done super trendy with Liberty Ross in the 90′s and early 2000′s and they don’t know where to go so they are going back to classical, black and white noir. Retro in other words and Rob is to help them do it. Kristen’s Campaign as you noted was carefully done, intelligent and obviously G had read and absorbed Baudelaire’s Fleurs du Mal – Flowers of Evil or Evil Flowers. Kristen’s perfume campaign is “literary” while Dior’s campaign is sex for $$$$$$

MCR

I don’t disagree. I just don’t know what the personal motive was for agreeing to the ad. And we should probably cut this short, since we’re trespassing on an unrelated comment board here. Wouldn’t want you to get banned from yet another site!

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

One more. I don’t think he was well advised. Just don’t think personal motive was a factor. Dior is probably a revered brand name to him. It certainly would be to his mother. It’s not.He needs to get new thinkers on his team.

MCR

That could well be. I assume he acquired his current team when he was barely into his 20s, and perhaps easily led. I hope he’s prepared to take charge if he’s being pointed in an unwanted direction.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

He has to know first and that is the role of good fans. To let him know. But the fans he has just drool over the shit. They are like those couriers of old who kept telling the emperor what a beautiful suit of clothes he had on. Anytime I confront them on anything, they gang up and ban me. I use jenni’s technique on them and that infuriates them.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Someone like Jenni or Jill. Or you. More literary people. More savvy people who aren’t with him for the money. None of them were successful before they got him. That’s why he got them when he wasn’t. IF they can’t grow with him, or let him grow, then……….NOw Kristen’s representation is tight assed.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Nick Frenkel, Rob’s manager, is an utter asshole.

MCR

I’ve heard that from other people as well. I wouldn’t know. I suspect that it’s a defining trait for Hollywood agents in general.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

He leaves his fingerprints on lots of things: Reese’s house during the scandal. It was put up for sale right after. Frenkel manages the trust Rob’s house is in. Abrams is the owner of gossip cop and tite with Summit, investing in Rob’s movies. Frenkel and Abrams are friends, Frenkel is now a part of a new management corp and Rob has been his only famous client. His real meal ticket. There’s lots more. NOtice he was the one who pointed to K’s lipstick on Rob’s mouth at BD 2 premiere. K encourages Rob’s independent movie choices, which don’t pay much. That’s not good for Frenkel. He saw his chance to get rid of Kristen but he was no match for her.

MCR

Whether or not he’s a match for her may remain to be seen, but the Junior Svengali scenario you suggest is certainly intriguing.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

There’s much more when you delve into it. When you find out all his clients – when he doesn’t want you to know or have that info – just his uneducated way of conducting business. Abrams is formidable. Gossip Cop is a travesty for someone with a law degree from Columbia. Abrams owns a PR social media corp with another person from Summit. They sure did use social media to screw Kristen, drum up controversy and excitement for Breaking Dawn 2, didn’t they. And certainly Frenkel could have asked Abrams to quit on Kristen. He didn’t tho did he. Also not a question.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Please do me a favor and nudge starlight about my banning and ask her to fix it. I have wanted to say things to you about On the Road and the character of Moriarty. Kesey used him in cuckoo’s Nest as the Jack Nicholson character.He was just larger than life.

MCR

I don’t think I have any pull with her, but I’ll drop a word if you like.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

She’s busy and I don’t think it’s a matter of any pull. She is just more fair than all the rest of the Rob sites. If she’s not then good-bye.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Thanks. I think she doesn’t want to fix it. I leave every R/K place when it gets this way. Too bad. Why I started my own blog on Twilight. I think I’ll do a post on DIOR ROB and BALENCIAGA KRISTEN. “When you demand free speech you may have to listen to things you would rather not hear,” says Machiavelli in The Prince.

MCR

Why not discuss it on the On the Road page at IMDb? I can find you there.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

I went there for Cosmo and it is a zoo. So many rather unintelligent people that I would rather not. For movies I read http://www.them0vieblog.com by Darren in Dublin Ireland. IT gets best media blog all the time. He really watches and listens and knows a great deal of movie history. He is especially good on the superhero ones and has gotten me to go see a few. Then I just write about the ones I write about. On the Road is an everlasting masterpiece. Maybe you just had to be there then to really feel it. Such nostalgia I have for that time.

http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

Why is anyone even talking about these people. They are all the pits to do this to their kids.