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Topic: RE #21 - The Chancellor's Gift (Read 8814 times)

As a new day begins on Coruscant, Republic Commander Rykrof Enloe's medical treatment begins its final stage.

Back on the planet for several days since his narrow escape from the Badoo Corba, Rykrof has undergone extensive medical treatment to heal the wounds inflicted upon him during his imprisonment on Yinchorr.

The next days seemed sort of a dream, a phantasmal prison from which he would never awaken. During this time Rykrof remembered how until recently the Republic had glittered, been the centerpiece of hope and prosperity… before the dark times, before the Clone Wars.

But even before the war he had fought the Badoo Corba for the better part of a decade. With the war effort now being concentrated against the Confederacy, the Badoo Corba had become an afterthought to the military; free to gain strength and no longer vulnerable.

After his final treatment, rest and debriefing with Republic Intelligence, Rykrof receives news that the Supreme Chancellor has requested his presence at a social gathering with some of the most influential political and military leaders in the Republic.

Eager to see their friend, Freelo and Ralbarr greet Rykrof as he is cleared to leave the facility.

"I'm alright guys," Rykrof says to his closest friends before explaining that he is scheduled to meet with Chancellor Palpatine.

After Ralbarr grunts his disapproval, Rykrof assures his Wookiee friend that there is no reason to fear Palpatine.

In a nearby Senatorial drink lounge, several elite Republic Senators enjoy a late beverage that evening.

Nearly everyone has the same topic in mind for conversation this evening; the progress of the War.

"The entire process is a tragedy," Senator Nuros says sadly. "This entire war could have been avoided through understanding the enemy."

"That way of thinking only makes the Republic weaker," Niris Cellin replies. "We must support the Chancellor on all fronts. Only once the Separatists are defeated can we have peace."

Meanwhile a military officer approaches the bar for a drink.

"What will it be," the sultry bartender asks.

"Make it a double shot Correlian whiskey-bomb," he says with a grin.

"Wait, I recognize you," she says. "You're that commander who was on the holo net! You were captured by terrorists!"

"Thanks for the reminder," Rykrof says as he turns away.

Rykrof then is escorted by the Chancellor's assistant, Mas Amedda, to a dark guest room.

“Commander Enloe,” Palpatine says with a grin. “How good of you to join us on such short notice. I trust you have fully recovered from your injuries?”

“Tell me,” Senator Orn Free Taa says in a bubbly manner, “How in the Force did you manage to escape from the Badoo Corba?”

"More information will be made public for the media soon," Palpatine says before Rykrof can reply. "I need to speak with Commander Enloe alone. Leave us."

Once secluded from the crowd, Palpatine turns to Rykrof to speak in private.

“The public does not need to know every detail in military matters. I understand you had help on the inside on your escape. Is this true?”

“Actually it is. And I didn’t handle the situation properly,” Rykrof suggests. “One of them helped me escape. He was killed in the process.”

“Tell me what happened,” Palpatine says.

“We had the chance to get out together. But I wanted to find Mubaas Fuuda… because of my actions, the one who helped me was killed. It was my fault,” Rykrof laments.

“You had good intentions Rykrof,” Palpatine smiles. “We all know the threat the Badoo Corba bring. In some ways they may be a bigger threat than even the Separatists. They abide by no laws; there are no limits to what they will do to accomplish their goals. Because of this they are very dangerous.”

“I do wonder what you were thinking in trading yourself for your wife on Kobridor however,” Palpatine inquires.

“I’m not sure I understand what you're getting at,” Rykrof says.

“I apologize for being so forward,” Palpatine says. “But what did you hope to accomplish? Don’t you think it would have been wiser to try and draw the Badoo Corba leadership out into the open? You know very well that your mission on Korbridor was not to participate in a personnel exchange.”

“What else was I to do?” Rykrof asks in a bitter tone. “Getting my wife killed is not what I consider an acceptable option.”

“Even if it meant costing your life? You know the policy of the Republic is to not negotiate with terrorists. And that is exactly what you did on Kobridor,” Palpatine says darkly.

“I’m very sorry for that Chancellor,” Rykrof replies as he looks away. “But I had no choice. It was a field decision and I stand by it.”

“Yes, I’m sure you did what you felt you had to. I hear your wife was not very accommodating in her interrogation after your capture, but what you shared with intelligence has been helpful. While you were in recovery your friend Admiral Gere led a raid of the abandoned facility you were held at on Kobridor. This base was however not one of the stations listed on the data cylinders you brought back months ago from your mission to Dathomir.”

“Well they have more terror cells than any of us thought,” Rykrof says. "I still think it would be best to follow up on the leads we have."

“Rykrof my friend, I know you have your reasons for hating the Badoo Corba as much as anyone. But you will find that the choices we have to make in this war can not always be driven by personal interests. It’s possible you have been through more than any other officer since the onset of the war. You’ve been through so much …just speaking with you has turned into much more than I had anticipated. I should have expected as much, as you’ve become quite the celebrity. But this is not why I wanted to speak with you,” Palpatine says.

“Then why did you call me here?” Rykrof asks.

“I wanted to tell you in person that you are being granted a leave of absence. Go home to Naboo. It’s what you need. You will be notified when I need your assistance.”

"This isn’t a request, Commander. It’s an executive order.” Palpatine says. “Arrangements have already been made for your departure in the morning. Just remember that the time will come when the Republic needs you again. Enjoy your time off."

"Now if you'll excuse me, you are not my only guest.”

As one of Palpatine's admirers enters the room, Rykrof makes his way back to the crowd in the main hall. Although he feels a sense of guilt for being granted an extended leave, he feels the Chancellor is right and is relieved for a true break from the war.

After all, the taste of quality beer can make any man want to head for the mountains of Naboo.

As Rykrof heads back into the gathering, he sees his good friend, Senator Tame Heem of Ithor.

"Rykrof," the mild mannered Ithorian says, "It is so good to see you. I have been praying for your recovery since your escape."

Worn and tattered, Finis Valorum, former Supreme Chancellor of the Republic stares Rykrof in the eyes.

"Rykrof, I'm embarrased to have to appear this way. But I can't risk being recognized by the wrong people these days. Not Palpatine, not even by most in the military."

"I sense you have great fear in the the direction the Chancellor is leading the Republic," Jedi Master Kala Mly Shundi says. "And with good reason."

“Yes, and I wanted to tell you before you left Rykrof, I am ever grateful that you escaped the Badoo Corba. But beware of Palpatine. I don’t know what he’s telling you but don’t trust him. He’s not your friend,” Valorum says. “He will say and do things to manipulate you, to gain your trust.”

“Lines have been drawn,” Valorum continues. “Separatists on one side, and the Republic on the other. This line is drawn in blood. And Palpatine is very careful to ensure whose blood the line is drawn from… once this war is over, the victor will emerge as a tyrant.”

“We understand your concerns as much as anyone,” Rykrof admits, motioning towards Freelo. “But the Chancellor has ordered for me to take a leave of absence for the time being. There’s not much I can do.”

Wow. I'm going to need a little time to digest this chapter before really critiquing it. I do have a few thoughts right off though...

Although this chapter had no action, a lot happened. I like that you're laying the groundwork for the next arc. I also like that Rykrof is apparently dealing with feelings of guilt over Judiss. It's a nice human touch that adds to the realism of the characters. I have an idea about that I'll PM you about...

Everyone seemed spot on in their characterizations, although Valorum seemed a little too direct with his suspicions. After all, even though he and Rykrof have history, it doesn't seem a man in Valorum's position would speak so plainly in such dangerous times. Still, perhaps desperation is forcing Valorum's hand.

I don't think we needed to be told in the narrative that Jenessa heard every word Rykrof said. You take such wonderful pictures Chewie...sometimes you should let THEM tell the story. Placing Jenessa in the right spot in the pic with the right head position would indicate she was listening, and perhaps not be caught by some, allowing a ticking time bomb element in the story where we could look back and go "Damn! She WAS listening the whole time!"

Great use of your sets and camera angles. Really moved things along and added some drama to what was essentially a talking heads chapter. It really flowed well and didn't get bogged down at all. You're really getting good at this!

Bravo, man. Bravo! Perfect transitional chapter from the most recent episode with the BC to political intrigue and deception!

1. Nice touch keeping a black eye on RE. It's a detail that is easy to ignore in production, but it gives the story a temporal grounding, and you know as well as anyone that with the layoff between chapters that kind of grounding is critical.

2. I must have missed that Rodian Senator. Dead perfect.

3. Good job having Palpatine twist RE's heroism into a breach of duty. Sounds just like something he'd do! I also like that RE only initially resisted the order of leave. I don't think I could have believed that he would - after what he just went through - fight too hard against a return to Naboo.

4. Nice placement of the fledgling Rebellion in the bar. And nice work keeping it as brief as you did.

5. Your Twi'lek spy placement was great. Great work on that figure, and great work in getting her into the story.

6. The interaction of RE and co. with Valorum was very well executed. I liked that Kala seemed very in tune with Valorum's misgivings while Freelo was clueless. RE's coming around to just how serious Valorum's tone was seemed very realistic... almost like RE was tempted to just be selfish and say "not my problem" before breaking down and asking Valorum to call him on Naboo. I also like that Valorum is breaking down more and more... it's like he's losing faith in what is right, and the manners are the first casualty.

7. The after-action scenes with GG and the BDs are perfect, and really look like the aftermath of a terrible defeat for the Republic. The Dooku holo shots came out perfectly. Convo between Dooku and GG was also dead on.

8. This cracked me up, mostly b/c it sounds like an adapted Busch beer ad: "After all, the taste of quality beer can make any man want to head for the mountains of Naboo."

CHEWIE, I know you get nothing but praise for these, but do know it's well-deserved. I do my best to give a very critical eye, as I hope for the same from others. I just can't find much in the way of problems! You not only deliver the goods each and every time you post, but you seem to get better and better. Maybe the new live action series for TV will bring you in to consult or something...

There are a few typos:

- "With the war effort now being concentrated against the Confederacy, the Badoo Corba had become an afterthought to the military; free to gain strength and was no longer vulnerable."

The last "was" is out of place there. "...free to gain strength and no longer vulnerable"

Well, I wrote a response, and then that stupid timing-issue at Sign-In timed out and it lost my response!!!

Here it is again:

Great looking shots of the medical team. The x-ray is a cool effect. My favorite scenes are the bar/lounge pics. The combination of the lighting and bar look very real. Additional features like cups add to the scenery.

The customs are great here. The Rodian Senator looks like a regular Hasbro fig. And that bartender........ I know what i'd have from her.....is her name "Bianca" by chance???

The Palpatine and RE dialogue is spot-on. Great shots there, and great use of different angles and poses. Necessary during a long discussion.

I agree with DELICIOUS' comments above. The narrative can be too informative. Just placing the batender in the background of the pics (looking towards RE) would have been good enough. And given a scent of suspicion. Also, regarding Valorum, his dialogue with RE out in the open was a little strange. This dialogue could have taken place in RE's apt/hotel room after retiring from the bar. Shundi could have accompanied him too. That way, RE would think about what he said overnight and into the next morning.

Finally, the last pics are cool! I really like the Grievous and BD pics. Too bad we missed GG carving up the Jedi. The Dooku hologram was perfect. And the final shot of the shuttle approaching Naboo was sweet!

On a personal note, I was disappointed to see Freelo staying behind on Coruscant. Could he join RE on Naboo later.....you know.....in case there is an "accident"......

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"WE HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE. TODD WILL COOPERATE."-Sarah Palin to Charlie Gibson, a week before her husband, Todd Palin, refused to cooperate

Great, great chapter. I felt like I was watching a SW movie or show- great dialogue, I loved the conversation with Palpatine and Rykrof. It sounded just like Palps, to turn Rykrof's actions that saved himself and his wife into a bad thing. That's a really good plot twist at the end...it'll be interesting to see how Rykrof gets out of the grubby hands of Snodd...

By the way, just LOVED those pics of Grievous on Yeb IV. Great, especially the one with his foot on the dead Jedi's back.

There are so many wonderful details here. I really like the interaction beween Rykrof and the bartender. He had a very natural reaction to her comment about his capture. I also really like the Rodian, Duros, and Mon Calamari Senator customs. Great use of other bodies! Also, the plot was wonderful as usual. Palpatine's dialogue is particularly in character. I like how he plays the wife card that he used with Anakin on Rykrof. I also like how he dismisses him with an executive order. He's so evil.

Also, the R2 unit with the drink rack was another great little detail. I was completely surprised when the worn down Valorum showed up. This is turning out to be a great series. I can't wait to see when the plot catches up with Episode III. I was especially intrigued by what Bail and Mon Mothma said.

The Star Destroyer Ships in the Begining look very Cool, I have one of those Ships in an Imperial Fleet that will be in my Photo Novel, if it ever gets finished.

The Shots of the Medical Procedures are Awsome. How did you put those togeather?

The Rodain Senator was a nice Suprise, a very nice clean Custom. Recipe Please?

I like how your Working Rykrof into the Cut Prequal Sub-Plot, of Senators Mon Mothma and Bail Organa forming the Rebel Alience.

Jedi Master Kala Mly Shundi, I really am Starting to Like this Character. How about a little One Shot Spin-Off Adventure of him in some Heavy Duty Clone Wars action. I remeber this Custom looking Better When you Posted it a couple of weeks ago. Did you Change Something?

The Shots Of Grievous using the Holo Transmitter look Great. I have Grievous Posed in a similar manner on my Shelf only with a Clone Helmet Under foot instead of a Jedi.

Yeb VI is very Interesting. The Red Rock and Stormy Skies make for an interesting Contrast.

Overall a Great Transition Chapter, Although It could have used a little more Action. Mabey, Splice in a Scene of Grevious Dispaching that Jedi he's standing on.

chewie great update it's paced well gives us a bit of a breather between all the action going on in poor rykrofs life. the only thing i thought was missing is that alyssa should have been there as well to "be by his side" like the good woman we know she is. like i said before, for me it's all the background stuff that always makes the story complete, the story is a given with you i know it'll be good so i'm not worried. and damn that twi lek sure made it in the photonovel fairly quickly after you made her, nice assets. i hope she makes more appearances later. by the way is she blue allll over?

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Harmless is the most dangerous of perceptions, you never expect it to strike.-Purge

Ill leave the few gramatical inconsistancies and mistakes to others to persue, and just inform you that i love what is happening to this story, i think the foreshadowing with the rebellion is very cool amoungst other things. this is progressing very nicely and we will keep a close eye on your work.

First off, thanks to JesseVader for the front page mention along with SA's ongoing series too. I'll reply to each comment in detail now that it's had a chance to be read and I have a few minutes.

Darth Delicious - Yes, a lot was intended to happen here without much action. I felt that a previous story, TWISTED ALLEGIANCE was somewhat similar in that aspect but was a lot happier with how the pics on this one turned out. Much easier I think on the eyes.As for Valorum, I am at the point with him where his character doesn't have much time left, I wanted to be able to capture the opportunity for him to express his greatest fears. He doesn't feel there is time to sugar coat anything in my characterization of him, that his belief is that things have got to be changed soon or all will be lost.Regarding Jenesa, I guess I still like to throw narrative in there. I like having pics speak for themselves to some degree, but I really enjoy writing too - I understand some would prefer less description, but I have a hard time sometimes with the pics showing what I'm trying to say. Her character will be one that might or might not be a surprise. Is she a Badoo Corba spy? Working for Palpatine? Or Dooku? Is she interested in Rykrof romatically? Or is she just a curious party that has heard about Rykrof? She will be in a future story for sure but I don't want to give away her role just yet. Just making her seen for now with a bit of interaction. Thanks in liking it even though this story wasn't action oriented. Sometimes I think less action is much more realistic.

Smartypants1635 - Assassination... who could it be? Rykrof isn't the only one on Naboo that could be a target. But it could be Rykrof - you'll find out soon, and there might be a main character death soon.

In Rem - Thanks for catching the typos first off. Remember how my computer crashed? Well Microsoft Word isn't working anymore, I found this out right before posting this story. Unreal the pain I've gone through with the PC lately.I'm glad you liked the black eye still being there on him, it just seemed right to leave that there for now as a reminder of what he recently went through. Thanks too on the Rodian senator, it was a custom I made about a year ago and am just now throwing it into the mix. On Palpatine's treatment towards Rykrof, I'm breathing a sigh of relief that it seemed to work right. On the Rebellion birth, I couldn't risk doing much more with it than that, but I felt it was time to show the first hints of it. Glad the Twi'lek seemed to work out in the role in your eyes.Yes, Valorum is beginning to break down. The years have been hard on him. And Rykrof is almost to the point where he doesn't want to deal with Valorum's criticism of Palpatine, but knows deep down that Valorum is right (and is a friend). And Valorum is being blunt for once instead of being politically correct.Very glad that the Grievious shots seemed ok. I liked that little setup a lot, and just wanted to throw in a reminder that the Separatists are still there, Jedi are dying, etc. And that Dooku is the figurehead of the Seps. And of course to give a hint of what's to come on Naboo.And yes - the Busch Beer ad was put in there just for kicks. Thought it would help represent Rykrof's yearning to kick back and have a good time on Naboo, away from politics, the war and the Badoo Corba. Thank you for the comments/feedback In Rem. If I didn't get some feedback like yours, I'd probably give these up. The one liner replies I get are nice too, but I can get that for just posting a custom, you know?

Brent - Thanks for taking the time to go back and read them all, I know the first 10 or so are horrible so bear with me please. The eyes are something I finally decided to work on to liven up the stories - I've experimented with it a few times in the past but never seemed to get it right as you might notice on some Dooku shots in the past. Hopefully they're looking ok now, and thanks for noticing that.

SA Longhorn - Thanks for taking the time to go back and repost your thoughts, I always appreciate your ideas and feedback.Glad you liked the medical shots, those were a bit tricky and hard to find material for but I think it looks ok, or at least I hope so. Ha Ha on the Bianca comment... man, I should have named her that as a tribute. On the Palpatine shots, you were a lot of inspiration for that with how you do discussion shots. I always am in awe of how you make it look so good so I tried to emulate your style.On Valorum, he's being so straight forward because he's been along with Rykrof early on in Rykrof's career a lot, and knows Rykrof very well. Plus he's finally just being blunt about it, and he knows he can trust the group. I wanted to make this the last thing Rykrof had to deal with on Coruscant which is why it took place right before his departure. This might be the last time he sees Valorum alive.Glad you liked the Grievous shots, I almost added in him killing the Jedi, but thought it best maybe to leave that to the mind of the reader as to how he died. Although I'm not against showing violence of course.The Naboo shot was one of my favorites I've been able to do, and Freelo... oh how you dislike him.

Findswoman - I always love to hear your perspective on the series, hope to hear more from you soon.

Darth Nirvana - You've got to be the most mature 14-15 year old on any forum. Way beyond where I was at your age. I appreciate the kind feedback. Glad you remember General Snodd. It's a character I like and can't wait to get him back in the series. I hope you have a new chapter up soon too, I always enjoy them a lot.

The Professor - Thanks so much, it's good to hear from you. I wish I could make sets like you do...Glad you liked Rykrof's reply about his capture, I'm trying to make his personality as real as possible. Also on the Valorum, he used to be a regular in the series when Rykrof was in the early days of chasing the Badoo Corba around the galaxy, it's nice to be able to still have him in it some. There will be a lot more of characters like Bail in the future.

Fritzkrieg - Thanks on the opening shot, that was fun to do and I was happy with it. Can't wait to see your version of a photonovel, I know a lot of people are anticipating that.On the medical center, it was a combo of pieces from the Star Destoyer Owen made for me and digital imagery. It turned out better than I thought it would.The Rodian custom is from a Tion Medon body, just repainted is all and dry-brushed.You are right about Kala - I have a plan for his own photonovel soon, involving Dooku and Quinlan Vos. And another Jedi or two. It could be good if I can come up with a script that I like.Thanks for the comments, I agree that more action would get more people into it more. There will be a lot of action soon though... just wait until Rhen Var.

Spectre - I kind of liked the slow pace too actually. I think sometimes that makes for a steady read and is easier to understand. You are right, something big will happen on Naboo that will be a major part of what happens after the Clone Wars.

Famine - I refuse to reply to an ICMG basher. Just kidding of course. On the drink sequence, yeah I'm just trying to show the "guy side" to Rykrof as a regular Joe in many aspects, but by circumstances has become an important element in the Republic.The pilot is just a random guy walking by, no significance to him but good thinking there.

jedipurge - Good idea on Alyssa... I came very close to having a sequence with her in it. The only reason I didn't, is because I didn't want to make a chapter that had no action to get too long or drawn out. But don't worry, her nude scene is coming up in the next story.On the background stuff, thanks for noticing the work put into it, and it's cool that you noticed that some customs I just finished are in it. Some of this I started on a month ago, and some just a few days back. Is Jenesa blue all over? I'd like to know.

Dhivael - Thanks, and you can feel free to find grammar errors too if you want. God knows I make them.I'm glad you seem to be enjoying the story, and the hints of a rebellion. Keep me posted on your thoughts on future ones.

Thanks a lot everyone for the feedback, it's very appreciated and takes time to read these stories and give your thoughts, so thank you very much.