“You need a fucking keeper,” Wardo rages. “Someone apparently needs to make you drink orange juice and stop you from blowing up your appliances and spray you down with a fire extinguisher every now and then, for the love of God. Why the fuck don’t you have people doing these things?”

Mark and Eduardo's summer fling should have been just that -- a fling. But when they end up in orchestra together, the things they didn't talk about bubble to the surface, and they're both forced to deal with the issues neither of them want to confront. Or, essentially, a high school orchestra au.

With a gun to your head and a bomb below your feet, the things that really matter become suddenly, incredibly, undeniably clear. For the tsn_kinkmeme prompt: Someone has a vendetta against Mark because of Facebook, goes to the Facebook building, and has a bomb. Cue hostages, realizations (and plenty of worry/angst/heartbreak).

TSN librarian AU! Where Eduardo is a children's librarian and Mark is an information specialist brought in to revamp the catalogue. And along the way there are books! misunderstandings! online reference! romance!

Mark has always cared for Wardo in his own way. That doesn’t stop because of a lawsuit. (or: The five times Mark did something nice during/post-deposition and the one time Wardo finally noticed and they lived happily ever after)

Prompt: Eduardo gets amnesia, wakes up in a hospital only to find out that Mark and him are together for a few years already. All that Eduardo remembers is being angry at Mark, hating him at times, and not having seen him since the law suit.<br />
Mark angsts and tries to be there for his man, Chris & Dustin worry, Eduardo doesn't know how to deal with Mark in his life and all the strange flashbacks that leave him all needy.

Prompt: Eduardo gets amnesia, wakes up in a hospital only to find out that Mark and him are together for a few years already. All that Eduardo remembers is being angry at Mark, hating him at times, and not having seen him since the law suit.<br />
Mark angsts and tries to be there for his man, Chris & Dustin worry, Eduardo doesn't know how to deal with Mark in his life and all the strange flashbacks that leave him all needy.

Of course Dustin has probably the only car in the world that reads you your Facebook newsfeed. Of course he does. (and when Mark and Eduardo get stuck in it together, they end up saying a lot without ever speaking a word.)

prompt: Eduardo and Mark are slowly working on regaining their friendship when Eduardo realises he's falling in love. Cue angsting about not wanting to ruin their fragile friendship, and Eduardo might be willing to be friends, but how can he trust Mark not to break his heart?

So he has Eduardo now, and maybe Eduardo has learned to not expect too much of him, but Mark—Mark doesn’t want to be that. He wants to see the details, he wants to know how to—how to keep this. He wants to know Eduardo as thoroughly and instinctively as he does Facebook, because he has both again, and this time he will make it work.

Prompt: The one where Mark somehow ends up with a child and of course needs a nanny for the amount of time he spends at the office. Only problem is a string of nannys keep trying to get into his pants for what he assumes is his money. Cue Mark's assistant hiring a male nanny, enter Eduardo.

Mark and Dustin are both virgins and they make an ill-advised bet about who can change that first. Eduardo wants to help, okay, really Mark, he can help you out with that, but Mark’s decided to start a sexual revolution of some sort, and Chris just thinks it’s really funny.

Dustin shakes his arm and Mark nearly hits him, startled back into awareness. Dustin kneels down so he can look Mark in the eye. He says, very seriously, “Long term sleep deprivation causes death in lab rats.”<br />
Mark says, “Everything causes death in lab rats.”<br />
He thinks Dustin leaves at that point but Mark has been mostly awake for six days now so it’s possible he’s not best placed to make that judgement.

You know what's cooler than one million dollars? Eduardo Saverin, time traveler.<br />
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Sequel to Place That Don't Know My Name, in which Eduardo goes swanning off with the Doctor after the depositions and saves human existence as we know it. Reading that one is necessary to get this one, as this is the story of how Mark and Eduardo are reunited.<br />
Well. Eventually.

"Wardo's not in Singapore," said Mark.<br />
Chris looked up from his desk. Dustin dropped his coffee.<br />
"Dustin, for fuck's sake -- "<br />
"Dude," said Dustin. He waved a hand. "Cleaners will get it. Not important."<br />
"No, right, sorry, I have scalding hot coffee all over my feet, not important at all."<br />
"Not as important as the monumental fact that Mark just mentioned Wardo's name for the first time since," he stopped. The depositions were still just as taboo a topic as Wardo. Although Mark had just flouted the taboo pretty spectacularly. Dustin flailed inwardly. Then outwardly for good measure, catching Chris around the ear.

Written for this prompt at the tsn_kinkmeme: Mark hires a prostitute that looks remarkably like Eduardo. The paparazzi spot them out somewhere. Whether the pics end up online or Mark's people manage to kill the story in time is entirely up to you, but Eduardo has to find out somehow.

What I’m Trying To Say, or, ‘5 times Mark does something creepy to try and get Eduardo to be his friend again without actually apologizing’ (Of course one of those things involves Inception, do you even have to ask?)

Mark’s having a pretty normal week. The company’s involved in a couple new privacy lawsuits, he hasn’t slept in three nights because he’s been up working on coding for some new apps, and Sean has disappeared, so god knows what he’s up to. It’s not even surprising at this point; Mark just prays he doesn’t get arrested or photographed with the wrong people.<br />
Also, and this is maybe where the week starts to become less normal, Mark finds out that his mom thought he and Eduardo were dating. Like, not currently, obviously, because that would make even less sense, but in the past, like, back when they were still friends, before he’d...before Eduardo had sued him for 600 million dollars and then never spoken to him again.

Eduardo & Mark have to attend some kind of shareholder's/young-and-a-billionaire's meeting in Vegas/Vermont/Illinois. One thing leads to another and they WAKE UP MARRIED. A quicky divorce/annulment would be easy if not for the fact that Mark drunkenly changed his facebook status to MARRIED TO EDUARDO SAVERIN.<br />
Or, Mark and Eduardo get drunkenly married. Chaos ensues.

'The men are on the phone to someone – his company, maybe, or his parents. He’s already been asked to give the requisite proof-of-life response to his name on the line. One of them says, “All right, put Zuckerberg on the phone.”' Kidnap-fic, for a prompt response.

Looking up at the mess of stars above New (New New New) Singapore, he stops being Eduardo Saverin, absentee CFO of Facebook, and starts being Eduardo Saverin, time traveling companion to a mad man in a blue box who keeps on calling him Frank.

The one where Eduardo thinks they are in a tragedy with subtitles and pouring rain and his life is so hard, while Mark thinks they are in a romantic comedy and it is awesome. They meet in the middle.<br />
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Sad Eduardo angsty angst. Fluff. H/C

Someone is sitting at the desk outside his office.<br />
Mark comes to stand by the desk. “Do I know you?”<br />
He is given a quietly appraising look. The man stands and offers Mark his hand. “Eduardo Saverin. You’re supposed to be interviewing me.”<br />
Written for a prompt at the kinkmeme: They meet when Mark's already a billionaire and Eduardo is his new personal assistant.

Mark was supposed to be a solo act; that had been his intent, all along. But it turned out that no one wanted to listen to a guy singing over a banjo unless that guy was Steve Martin, and then he’d met this guy through Youtube who played cello.

[Step-brothers AU] It’s true, there’s remarkably little awkwardness between Mark and him. Maybe it’s because they’re both mature enough to work past any that might arise, for the sake of their parents. Maybe it’s because Eduardo can see that Mark is a better person than he seems to think he is, and Mark doesn’t care that Eduardo doesn’t always feel like being kind and giving, that sometimes he just wants to say exactly what he’s thinking.<br />
Maybe it’s because they’d both been looking for the kind of friend that would understand them fully, and it just so happened that this is the way they met.

BAKERY AU. Mark is Mark, Eduardo owns a bakery/café near the Facebook offices. Mark does not have time to have a thing for him, but he totally, totally does. Sadly for Mark's continued enjoyment of a harassment-free existence, Dustin is still Dustin and is entirely devoted to his causes of a) getting Mark laid, b) acquiring all the gossip, and c) acquiring all the baked goods he can. Featuring novelty shaped cookies, frosting in places frosting should never be, and ~feelings~.

The ridiculously angsty hookerfic of doom. From the kinkmeme prompt So, Eduardo's father always figured his son was useless. But he is nice to look at and there's some good in that. Cue the idea that he can use Eduardo as a 'sweetener' to close some tricky business deals. He's been doing just this for years when it comes time to close a particularly tricky deal...<br />
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Forced prostitution, revenge, drama, chases/stalking across Europe and Asia, inappropriate humor, lots of angst, socially maladaptive behavior, and eventually, a happy ending.