82

69

81.4

79.1

79.9

.534

.554

0.2%

54.2%

54.3%

8.2%

30.4%

Instead of recruiting an imprisoned pitcher with poor control, a catcher with no knees, and an outfielder who couldn't hit curveballs, Rachel Phelps should have taken a simpler approach to tanking the Indians' attendance: wait 'til 2013.

2

82

68

79.3

88.2

88.6

.563

.583

0.0%

69.3%

69.3%

-12.5%

5.7%

At long last, 2008 no. 1 pick Tim Beckham is a big leaguer. Picks 2-21, all of whom made the majors before him, have already combined for almost 65 WARP.

81

70

78.4

79.7

78.1

.525

.505

0.0%

3.3%

3.3%

1.4%

1.7%

89

62

86.9

86.3

84.1

.573

.593

99.6%

0.4%

100.0%

0.0%

1.1%

The A's will open the Coliseum's third deck for the ALDS, both to accommodate more fans and to give those in the lower levels somewhere to flee to when the sewage level rises.

5

88

63

93.7

100.2

99.3

.631

.649

99.8%

0.2%

100.0%

0.0%

0.3%

"A long time, I had not hit a home run," said Miguel Cabrera after ending a 15-game drought with his 44th dinger. "Everything is relative," responded Ben Revere.

6

67

83

68.5

71.7

73.5

.468

.448

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Concerned by baseball's rapidly rising strikeout rates, Bud Selig is considering a "best interests of baseball" decree that all batters "be more like Norichika Aoki."

7

69

81

70.4

67.7

69.5

.461

.481

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

R.A. Dickey faced 26 batters and threw 23 first-pitch strikes on Tuesday. Among AL pitchers, only Anibal Sanchez and Joe Blanton have had starts this season in which they faced at least 25 batters and had a higher ratio. Not bad for a knuckleballer.

8

64

86

60.8

64.7

64.9

.424

.444

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Though no one would've minded if the two teams had pretended to have an offday, the Twins and White Sox went ahead with their matchup anyway. One of them won, I'm sure.

9

66

85

61.3

66.5

66.0

.430

.450

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

I'm not saying Raul Ibanez definitely feeds on the life force of promising young players in order to remain productive after age 40, but it would explain a lot of things about Seattle's season.

10

67

83

67.7

65.6

65.0

.442

.422

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

After a Monday meeting with Dr. James Andrews, Matt Harvey decided to try rehabbing his injured elbow. "I'm completely confident that he'll avoid surgery," thought no one who heard the news.

11

70

81

69.5

73.8

74.6

.477

.457

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Late-season sensation Yusmeiro Petit spent 2011-12 repeatedly being released by and re-signing with Seattle. He's finding San Francisco more to his taste.

12

71

80

62.8

63.4

65.2

.434

.415

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Other than the lack of velocity, command, groundballs, and missed bats, another vintage outing for Roy Halladay.

13

70

80

65.6

66.4

66.8

.448

.428

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

The Padres played spoiler in Pittsburgh, then went home and wondered what it says about them that they can't just be happy about someone else's success.

14

55

96

59.6

55.8

56.7

.376

.357

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

Jeff Mathis went 0-for-3 at the plate and 2-for-2 at working well with pitchers.

15

73

78

75.9

77.4

76.0

.500

.520

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

92

60

94.3

93.6

92.7

.613

.632

100.0%

0.0%

100.0%

0.0%

0.0%

If you picked Danny Valencia and his lifetime .269 OBP vs. right-handed pitchers as the man who would break Koji Uehara's streak of consecutive batters retired, your results were good, but your process sucked.

17

69

83

72.2

70.9

67.9

.461

.441

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

0.0%

I was all set to support Todd Helton's Hall of Fame candidacy, but last night's 0-fer has made me seriously reconsider.

You sure nailed the Matt Kemp comment. He is the answer to another distinguished Dodger, 1st baseman/outfielder Mike Marshall. For his entire career, Mike wore a medical alert bracelet, identifying himself as a hypochondriac.