Saturday, October 26, 2013

Joey came to stay with us for a few days. He was a cool dude,
not very big, but chill. He was really "well behaved," my lady said. Not sure
what she meant by that. Just because he sat, and danced and came immediately
when he was called. I thought he was a little boring to be honest.

He kind of looked like a fox and not really a dog, but he
smelled like a dog so that was cool. It was calm and peaceful in my home for a
few days.

Then Penny came to stay.

Penny and Joey sitting in a tree, kissing and kissing and
kissing all the time! Crazy how much those two kissed each other. It was
downright disgusting.

Joey Boy

Penny was a six month old little girl, I’ll admit very cute,
although she was one of those designer dogs.

A Toy Australian Shepherd she was
only about ten lbs if that. She was an exuberant little nugget, always flying
around this way and that, crawling all over my Lady, kissing and cleaning her.
She felt it was her job to clean everyone. She tried a couple times with me, but
I said "no."That’s just weird. Boundaries
you know.

Joey loved it though, and started kissing her back. Good god
they played like there was no tomorrow, always rolling around on each other,
holding paws, licking each other’s teeth. Sharing all the toys, kissing some
more. Always kissing!

The worst part was the food.They insisted on sharing with each other, but completely forgot about
me. That hurt my feelings even more than the non-stop cleaning sessions.

I tried to show them how the big boys play with one of my
big fuzzy bears. I stood in the middle
of the room and shook it all around really hard. They just ran for cover and
stared at me like I was crazy.

Then they started kissing each other again. Penny would run
off and Joey would chase her, then they would flop all over, arms wrapped
around each other, and kiss non stop, like for ever. Seriously their constant
licking was driving me crazy. I now knew why my Lady told me to stop whenever
she heard my licking. That constant licking sound drove me nuts. I barked at
them to stop, and they would for like a second.

“What’s up?” they said in unison. Disgusting. They even
thought alike.

No matter the momentary distraction, they went right back to playing and kissing again.

Little Penny Puppyhead

Finally Joey left, and although my Lady was worried Penny
was going miss her new boyfriend, I was secretly glad. I kind of liked it when
I was the only male in the house. Just sayin.

At least I felt that way until my Lady made up the Penny
Puppyhead song. “Are you a nickel, or a dime or a quarter???? NO! You’re Pretty
Penny Puppyhead and you live in my purse…” She carried that dog around
constantly and Penny loved it.She would jump on my Lady and wrap her body
around her neck and kiss her all the time. And my Lady loved it. She would rub her belly and kiss her head and sing that
dumb, dippy penny puppyhead song. I was seriously going to vomit.

“I just love, love, love your lady!” Penny giggled all the
time. “She’s just so funny and sings really bad.”

I have to say although little Penny was adorably cute, I was
super sick of seeing my Lady and Penny Puppyhead together all the time. And
their non-stop giggle fest was annoying. I never got the joke. It really was a
dumb song.

I’m surrounded by four lovely ladies– yes, I feel like the other famous H.H. – just call me Hamish Hefner for now.

The best part is they are super trainable. I had them barking at any sign of danger lurking about. I don’t know how much my Lady appreciated it though.

She does love the girlies – is obviously having a ball with the little fluff balls bouncing around. She loves the sounds of their pattering, little feet.

Yes, it's Romper Room

It’s annoying to watch them fight over her lap, though. So needy!

Little Capri Cupcake is staying with us awhile. Her lady is on some sort of cruise to Bora Bora or someplace like that. She’s a Coton de Tulear, very fancy and she knows it. She makes the cutest little cooing sounds, though. Like a little birdy. Only she’s a dog. I keep telling her that. She’s doing some obscene things with my Lady’s bunny slippers. Not sure what that’s all about.

Lily girl is a grand ole dame. She just had surgery, an emergency spay operation. At her age, going on eleven, it’s a pretty serious surgery. She’s definitely feeling better

Lily's on my couch

Bouncer and Bella are back again. They are always a trip. Bella certainly has some spunkiness to her. Loves to chase the squirrels in the back yard. She and Capri are playing non-stop. I try to join in, but they scamper away when I do.

today. My Lady spoon feeds her for pity's sake. High maintenance for sure.

Bouncer just wants to sit on my Lady’s lap. It’s kinda sickening with all the kisses. Her little Flashdance sweatshirt is cool though. “I get cold easily,” she said when I snickered. Ah, huh. Likely story.

Ugh, my paws are dirty. Great, my Lady notices my nasty footprints and now I have to get a bath. Gah!

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

My Lady kept saying “Hannah is coming. Hannah is coming.”
What the heck is a Hannah?

Hannah turned out to be an older gal, completely bonkers
about balls and set about using her wicked teeth to destroy every toy in the
house. The flying squirrel was no more.

She barreled into the place like she was Queen Sheba or
something. Grabbed every toy in her mouth like she was gathering nuts for the
winter. There is nothing worse than a dog with a hoarding problem.

I hate to admit it but I actually felt sorry the little
Jaeger meister. She claimed every toy in the joint and not once played with
him. He kept following her around waiting for a morsel of fun, but nope. She was
on a mission. Grabbed every toy she could stuff in her mouth and then would plop
down on top of them like she was stockpiling for winter.

All of this happened in the first fifteen minutes of her
arrival. In my house, I might add. If I wasn’t so doped up on pain killers I
might have said something. Maybe. Naps are always better. I never liked
confrontation too much. Especially with the older broads. Something about them
was just like hands off buddy, if you know what’s good for you. For some crazy
reason My Lady loved the old broads. The older the better she said. Which is
kinda nuts, but I've learned to accept it.

So I’m a good hour or so into my hourly nap when all hell
breaks loose.

At some point, Hannibal Hannah decided to dissect the room
with her body, literally lying half in the room across the floor, barricading little Jaeger from getting to any
of his toys, or his favorite chair.

He’s
quietly whimpering in the corner, pacing back and forth, trying to figure out a
way to get around the big she-beast. Hannah’s doing what all females do when
they feel like making someone crazy and completely ignoring him.

I looked at crazy Lady’s status, but she’s got her head
buried in her machine, completely oblivious to the oncoming situation. Oh lord,
this should be good.

All of sudden, little Jaeger leaps over Hannah, does this
crazy back kick thing that was really quite impressive, grabs his tiny mouse
thingy, and tries to make a jump for the chair. Hannah has other ideas. She
stands up during his mid-air twist and little J man went flying back, his mouse
thingy now airborne.

A free for all in Hannah’s eyes, who easily snatches
Jaeger’s beloved mouse in her shark-like jaws.

Stunned by his failure, little Jaeger sets off a howl that
made every hair on my body stand up. I’m not kidding, I felt like a porcupine. Hannah
drops the mouse and joins in, of course. Nothing like a good howl at the top of
your lungs at 9AM to get the blood pumping.

I do what any good host does and join in. My howling is booming
loud and really off key, the best howl there is, in my opinion.

My Lady’s thinking “not so much” and drowns us all out by turning up her
classical music. How she stays awake to that stuff I have no idea. I’m out like
a light. Considering the silence from J man and Hannibal, I’m guessing they’re
out too.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Just so chill and laid back, and super nice, little Jaeger was cool to have around. My lady adored him, made a little throne for him and everything. She even FaceTimed with his Lady since she knew he was missed.
And he was super cool through it all, like he was totally used to being fussed over.

"They love me, I know." He kinda sighed about it. "My life is truly blessed. I just can't help being that cute. What can you do?"

He never knew a sad day in his life the little Jaeger man, but he didn't seem to take it for granted either. He just knew to appreciate it all with grace and humor. "I have a great life and a great lady, enough said."

Funny enough, he did try to go at with the ladies though, which I thought was funny.

Old Hannah gal would kinda put him in his place. He wouldn't know what hit him.

For the first time in little Jaeger Meister's life he was going to have to work for it a bit.

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Well no one could
argue the beauty of Csinszka.

From her perfectly fawn colored fur to her sweet,
affectionate heart, this girl was absolutely paws down, the most gorgeous thing
on four legs I had ever seen. And at only ten months old, she was bigger than
me. Outstanding.

My Lady loved Csinszka almost as much as I did. I tried to
keep up with her in the backyard – both of us kicking and running into each
other. She was just so much fun! Nothing better than playing with the big gals.

This is my girl - mine!

She kind of knew to chill out a bit though – beautiful inside
and out, my lovely
Csinszka girl. I hope she comes back soon.

My lady came home a few weeks ago smelling like a hundred other dogs.
I wasn’t too happy that she left me all afternoon but then to basically rub my
nose in the fact that she was with other pups while she was gone, wasn’t too
cool.

She was pretty sad all night though. She apologized for
leaving me and said she spent all day at a shelter taking care of some poor
dogs that didn’t have homes.We sat next
to each other all night on the couch while she caught up with work and I caught up
with her. I missed her a bit. She seemed to like the fact that I fell asleep with
my head on her lap. My Lady might be a bit crazy at times, but she has a really
comfy, soft lap just the perfect size for my big head. I could tell she was
happy to be home, and I was really happy she was home too.

Sometimes I think about how crappy I had it before I met my
Lady, but not often. Smelling all those dogs on her brought it back a bit and I
had a hard time eating my dinner. Thinking about those cement floors and god
awful smells. Never knowing if I was going to live or die. The constant
barking alone is enough to drive anyone crazy.

I know I was horribly sick when I met my Lady.She was really worried about me, I could
tell. I was kind of worried about me too.I felt pretty close to dying. You kinda know when your body is giving
out. And I seriously thought my days were numbered.

Then I met my Lady and she spent a lot of time with me,
holding me and getting me to eat. I
spent a lot of time just napping next to her, trying to heal. I was pretty sick
inside and out.

I think my lady realizes today how happy I am that I have
her, as much as she is thankful to have me.

If you love big dudes like me, think about fostering for the Great Dane Rescue of North Texas. There are plenty of us who need good homes. We may not be designer dogs, but we make up for it in love.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Oh Lordy, Professor McGonagall is staying with us again. Poor
thing is close to fifteen years old, which is really, really old in dog years,
and she looks amazingly like Maggie Smith from the Harry Potter movies. Pretty,
but old. (Yes, I watch HP movies with my Lady, gotta problem with that?)

I thought Lucy Goosey or Dame Maggie Smith was hard of
hearing the last time she came, but um no, she’s now deafer than a doorknocker.
Poor thing. But she’s really kinda cute though, super soft fur, a little
spaniel mix I think. I like my gals with a little spice you know…

“Don’t even go there Sonny boy, I’ll hit you with a tail so
fast you won’t know what hit ya.”

Oh kay! Just making an observation. Will go back to sucking
on my bear for a bit…

“Don’t wake me again unless there’s a treat involved. Enough
said.” And Lucy went back to sleeping on the couch.

And my Lady just LOVES her, I mean LOVES her. I don’t know
what it is about senior pups, or more so the older lady pups, but my Lady just
melts when she’s with them. Like turns to total complete mush.

I whine at her a bit at times, because um seriously, old
Lady Lucy can’t hear all that mushy lovey stuff you’re saying to her, so why
not talk to me a bit? Get on over here and give me some ear scratches or belly rubbies,
woman.

Yeah, so I don’t like the mushy talk, but I never said anything
about the rubbies…

Oh, and here come the treats. The homemade turkey bacon
treats. YES! Gotta love that Lucy Goosey girl. She just huffs at me like I’m
stupid or something, but I know she’s got it down pat.She just looks at the camera with my Lady
behind it, her eyes all big and soulful. Sap, sucker, my Lady can’t resist.

My Lady somehow agrees and now I have to get a BATH
tomorrow. GREAT! Can’t a dude pup get a break? Just a few scratching here and
there, pull eaze. Gah! Baths. Not happy.

Gotta admit after the puppy frenzy we had here the past four
days, a little senior time is AWESOME. I’m really loving it. The house smells
good, my Lady went to town cleaning everything, saging the house and burning incense.
I think she felt a bit guilty for not having a lot of patience with the
pupsters. She can’t be good at everything though, I keep telling her.And I have to say I didn’t like the fact that
I had to stand for ten minutes while she cleaned the floors. I want my couch
when I want it, just sayin.

I was a little worried tonight when my Lady watched a three
year old tyke name Christopher. I thought for sure he was going to be even
worse than a puppy but he surprised me. Christopher kept telling me I was a
really good dog and gave me his pizza crust, which was super cool. I was very careful to take it with my lips and
not my teeth, and he giggled at that.And
when he left his cracker box on the floor for me CHA CHING!My Lady didn’t appreciate it, but I thought
it was awesome. Those goldfish crackers are the best! Yum! But, I have to say
the best part was when I overheard him say he wanted a “dog just like Hamish” when
he got older. I gotta say that was pretty darn cool to hear. Sniff, sniff, yawn. I
still got it.

And the little tyke was super nice to Lady Lucy too, even
kissed her on the forehead a couple of times. What a great little kid. I won’t
be so nervous the next time he comes over. I don’t think anyway.

Now that it’s the end of the night, it’s pretty calm and
peaceful in the house, my Lady working, the classical music playing, Lady Lucy
is asleep. I have to get up and throw my toys around a bit, just to stretch and
show my stuff. God, it’s great to be a dog named Hamish.

Lucy just rolled her eyes at me, again. “Give it a rest
Sonny boy. Take a nap.”