Barrister Vera Baird - who occupied the £125,000-a-year post for Gordon Brown until last month - was caught on camera speeding at 98mph.

But she claimed a ban would cause her 'excessive hardship' because she needed her car to wind up her affairs after losing her seat in Redcar, Cleveland.

And she told magistrates the punishment would cost taxpayers more money, as she is still eligible to claim MPs' expenses and would have to file a bill for taxi fares for the delivery of her paperwork.

There’s chutzpah, and then there’s chutzpah squared…

It didn’t do her any good, luckily:

But magistrates banned her for six months for the offence on the M4 near Cardiff.

This wasn’t, naturally, her first offence.

The barrister already had seven points on her licence and was given a further five, which earned her the driving ban under the totting-up procedure.

And the reason for her attept to set a land-speed record?

The court heard she was driving to visit an elderly female friend who had been injured in a fall.

She said: 'I had driven from Redcar to London, then on to Limeslade Bay west of Swansea. I was visiting my 67-year-old friend who had fallen and we were due to go on holiday the next week.

'She was hurt and feeling guilty about the holiday and depressed. I was uniquely the person to go and cheer her up.

'I can only imagine that somewhere toward the end of my journey unfortunately I went too fast.'

I don’t know who to feel sorrier for – the magistrates who had to sit and listen to this pile of old flannel with straight faces, or the poor woman whose only chance of being cheered up was a visit from this ghastly NuLab harridan…

Update: Anna Raccoon warns those taking the train to mind where they step...

Although it is always tempting to attend the hearing and throw yourself upon the mercy of the Court, in our experience a letter of mitigation is normally just as or more successful. Further, it avoids any inconvenience on your part and allows you to go to work on the day of the hearing and thus earn money towards the fine imposed! One of the reasons for this is that if you do not attend, the case can be dealt with more quickly and judicial time is saved. This can be used to your benefit."

Translation: You know you did it. We know you did it. They know you did it. You'll only annoy them by arguing and making them listen when they want to get off for dinner or deal with burglars and child molesters, so it's best you send a letter, which we will word-up for you.

On the other hand, who died? What she did hurt nobody as far as I can tell (otherwise she should have been charged with something rather more serious). Does banning her serve any real purpose other than to make all us little people pleased that one of the great and good has been brought down to our level when we should be demanding to be brought up to theirs.

The M4 near Cardiff currently has a 50mph speed limit due to the roadworks and she was doing 98mph? Damn right she deserved to be banned. If hardship is an issue, perhaps a lighter right foot in the first place was in order.

I see that she lives in Crouch Hill (London N8), so she'll be one of the labour luvvie types who wrecked Crouch End twenty years ago. That area is very well serviced by public transport including the night bus, N19, which used to stop about half a mile before in the rougher part of Islington (Nags Head) but it now proceeds from the West End, through Crouch End and on, I believe, to Enfield and beyond.