Thursday, November 09, 2006

Welcome to Dade County

Welcome to Dade County. I don’t like to use the name “Miami” because “Miami” conjures up images of beautiful women, white sandy beaches and cocaine smuggling, not much of which occurs once you venture west of I-95. What occurs west of I-95 you may ask? Well, pretty much whatever occurs in any other major American city with one glaring exception: It all occurs in Spanish. I don’t mean a pocket here and a pocket there, or a charming little “Latin Quarter” we could put in the Fodor’s guide. No, I mean a whole, living, breathing 11th largest American metropolitan area going about all of their day to day business in a language other than the one written on all of their street signs (that is unless you count the names given to streets to honor campaign contributors, mayor’s brothers-in-law and local baseball stars). This is why being a Dade white person, or “American” as we are called here, is such a surreal experience. If you live in LA or New York or San Diego or Phoenix or any other American city with a “Latin Influence” as they so nicely put it in Newsweek, you may experience this when you venture into certain parts of town, but when you get back to Brentwood or The Upper East Side or Del Mar or Scottsdale, everyone once again speaks English and goes about their business in a manner you are comfortable with and used to.

Such is not the case in Dade County. You know how in some cities you may decide to lunch at your local Burger King and the guy at the counter speaks no English and you get really frustrated, but once you get your Whopper with Cheese you forget all about it and go about the rest of your day without this frustration again? Well, in Dade, that definitely happens at Burger King (based in Miami, actually) but it also happens when you get back to work and try and call a locksmith to fix your door. It also happens when you go the bank to open a checking account, make a dinner reservation, call your lawyer or get your car fixed. This is the price you pay for living in a city with 24-hour liquor licenses and 82 degree weather all year round. That and the hurricanes.

White people in Miami are referred to as “Americans.” PC politicians would love to say that “We are all Americans,” but if someone here says “Yeah, this American guy came in here last week and threw this big fit at my secretary because she didn’t speak English” they mean he is white. We are not so much a minority, but more of a novelty. Have you ever gone into a store or a bar in an “ethnic” neighborhood and realized you were the only white person there? That is what happens to me when I go to Nordstrom. Go walk around Dolphin Mall or Dadeland on a Wednesday and I challenge you to find four “Americans.” Drugstore? Absolutely. The DMV? Go to the English Only window in Hialeah and you’ll be out of there in under 20 minutes. Santa’s Enchanted Forest? May as well be called El Bosque Encontado de Santa Claus. Am I complaining? No. If you are American and you want to move to Miami, the county requires you to sign a waiver stating that you understand you are moving to a place that does not speak English, nor will it ever try and do so, and that you will not go into a tirade worthy of Michael Douglas in "Falling Down" when the guy at the deli counter doesn’t understand what “3/8 of a pound” means. If you can accept these terms, Bienvenidos!The difference between Miami and other cities with large Hispanic populations is that in those cities, though there may be a lot of Latin people, the government and economy are for the most part run by Americans. I don’t necessarily mean whites, now, but Americans. In Dade, nearly all commerce and government is run by people from Latin America. This means that everything here happens pretty much like it would in El Salvador. Except the streets are a little cleaner. We had our mayoral election declared fixed a mere two years before the 2000 election debacle that made voting in Dade world famous. The fact that the U.S. presidency was decided by a voting process on par with the one that elected Daniel Ortega may explain the last five years a lot more easily.

What this has given me is a degree of empathy for minorities in other U.S. cities. If you are a Mexican living in Indianapolis, I would assume you experience many of the same frustrations we “Americans” experience here in Dade. If you are black and living in Orange County, I think you might feel much the same way we do. If you are Asian and living in Connecticut, again, welcome to the world of White Dade. Just colder. If you are white and live in ANY OTHER AMERICAN CITY (save for maybe El Paso, which doesn’t really count) you will never understand what it is like to have to live your life according to another culture’s rules until you move here. And not to Miami Beach or Brickell or Coconut Grove or anywhere else you’ve seen on the Travel Channel. Move to a numbered street in the triple digits and you’ll know what I mean. The point is in Miami we are a true minority. We are not oppressed since most “Americans” in Dade have money, but we have no real political or commercial power and live life according to the way the majority feels it should be run. This is why I don’t feel at all like a racist when I say that I am proud to be White or that I like doing White things. I like Latin people and Latin things too, but you should be proud to be what you are.

55 Comments:

Sounds a bit like some of my experiences in Hawaii - not in terms of language but of skin color. It was surreal being glared at in a Wal-Mart in Honolulu for being white. Can't say I now know what it feels like to belong to a minority group where many of the majority are less than kind, but I certainly have more sympathy for them. --Tresa S.

anonymous #2, any democracy i'd want to live under respects the minority, even while majority does rule. tyranny of the majority doesn't have much appeal for me, whether i'm in that given majority in any particular situation or not.

I would rather read duplicated White Dade posts 24 /7 then read the garbage you post. For God's sake if I had your life I would kill myself by the quickest way possible.

Also, TO ALL BLOGGERS:

Playtah is hosting a Democrat Only party on her lame blog. If you post a comment there offering a different political view she will not approve the comment and it won't be posted. The blog is filled with a bunch of poor, uneducated lazy people who hate the big bad Republicans because they don't offer enough government assitance.

Please do not visit her blog. Anyone that blocks free speech should not be allowed to post anything.

I posted most of your rants, but the 2 entries from you that I didn't post were when you went off subject and insulted the fertility/ability to have children of a wonderful person who tried for years to have a child. That is heartless, cold, and has nothing to do with the political discussion. I posted everything you said politically, even thought I disagree with it to my bones. I'd never censor someone for their political opinions. When you realized that she had actually made a valid point, you resorted to what every coward before you has: slander and personal attacks. When you try to "win" an argument by needling someone with pain that you know nothing about, that's not cool at all. I would rather you think that I'm "against free speech" than to insult a friend I've had 1/2 my life. I owe no loyalty to you. You are the only person I've ever had to censor, because you are the only person to stoop so low.

Anon1 ~ I may post what you consider garbage but it doesn't keep you away does it?

People (including you) can post anything that want but if it is vitriolic, asinine and doesn't contribute to the dialogue (basically 90% of what you do on White Dade's blog) I have no compunction to keep it on my blog.

You can bogart other people's blogs and act like a kamikaze commentor, insult everyone and their mother and get a cheap thrill that people are paying attention to you. You won't do it on mine for a few reasons.

#1 It is my blog. I can do what I want on it and that includes deleting comments. If you don't like it, don't visit. Better yet, start your own blog.

#2 I have friends and relatives (including my mother) that read my blog. I care about their feelings and I don't want them to get upset by idiocy.

#3 If the comment doesn't contribute the the content of what I write about it is useless. If you disagree with me, that's great but contribute something worthwhile.

I have learned something in life. You can't hide who you are no matter how hard you try. People always figure you out.

Extremely offensive and defensive people usually have a lot to hide. Unfortunately they usually don't hide it well.

Maybe you should have thought about not upsetting your family before you got knocked up by a random street thug. Well ladies get prepared for an early Christmas gift. You can't silence the truth for long.

Ann stop acting like you are educated Rachel. The GED you picked up last year doesn't mean crap. That meaningless job you have isn't helping either.

Anonymous ~ It isn't sad at all. My mother lives 2000 miles away and it is another way for her to keep up on what is happening in my life.My mother is very proud of me. Thanks for asking.

I wasn't left by my "baby daddy" as you refer to him. I chose to end the relationship with him.

In a perfect world everyone would have the "solid family foundation" that you tout so much but there are times when you have to do what is best for your child and yourself even if it includes choosing to parent and raise your child alone.

I don't regret the decision. I am too busy living for today to lament the past.