As Creepy Costumes Go, So Goes the Nation

Of all the implausible political theories blasted via late-night tweetstorms by Donald Trump supporters, one of the most bewildering came from Bill Mitchell, host of Your Voice Radio and post-truth activist. "So far Trump costumes are selling out while Hillary costumes are barely moving (like her). Just one more data point folks," he tweeted.

It bore all the hallmarks of a Trumpian claim: likely sparked by a single observation—why, yes, your co-worker Brad has told you a million times how awesome his "You're Fired Wig" and "Get America Stoned Again" snapback costume is going to be—generalized into a national trend, coated in a whole lot of exaggeration, and turned into an omen. And according to an unscientific SPY poll of Halloween stores in New York, Philadelphia, Cincinnati, Chicago, Austin, and Los Angeles, the facts on the ground not only don't align, but paint a far spookier picture for Trump.

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Retailers in these cities report doing brisk business with both Trump and Clinton masks for a simple reason: dressing up as both is a popular couple's costume. Usually it's a man dressing up as Trump and a woman as Clinton, but one of the managers at Lucy in Disguise with Diamonds declared its home city of Austin a "fun town" where gender didn't matter as much to those looking to get political on All Hallow's Eve.

Also, dressing up as a candidate does not indicate endorsement, in the same way that people who dress up as Kim Jong-un are not looking to move to North Korea. Derek Lee, owner of Philadelphia's D&J Costumes, sold out his masks for both candidates, but said customers were only speaking badly about one of them: Trump. That was also true at the Manhattan superstore Halloween Adventure, the only store that declared The Donald the winner in Halloween costume sales. "If we hid the Donald Trump masks we'd still sell out of them because people are coming in asking for them," says general manager Tony Bianchi. And from what he can tell from his customers, most of them are dressing as Trump to lampoon him. "They hate Trump in New York."

In fairness, people dressing as Hillary aren't all fans, either. In much redder Cincinnati, a manager at Cappel's Costumes said that she sold Trump and Hillary costumes to a couple where the husband was going as the world's biggest consumer of gold bathroom fixtures and the wife as the former Secretary of State, wearing a prison uniform.

And there is another aspect to Mitchell's "as goes Halloween, so goes the nation" theory. Consider that all retailers agreed that the two most popular costumes this year—by a not-even-close margin—are: Harley Quinn, Margot Robbie's lunatic criminal in Suicide Squad; and the creepy clowns who have been terrorizing the nation. By that trend, Trump's success could be because there's a run on psychopaths. So if you're only following Halloween costume polling, the Harley Quinn/Creepy Clown ticket should prepare for a surprise victory on Election Day.