Stop the Presses! Editor Punches Writer in Kisser

Here in the editorial offices of The Curmudgeon, I have sometimes been know to rant and rave about poor writing executed by a member of the staff. Not too much, but sometimes. Never mind that I am guilty of my own share of mistakes and crappy writing, but I’m the boss. When they become the boss, they can write crappy too.

But I don’t recall having ever punched a writer in the kisser (though I may have kissed a writer in the puncher). It’s just not the type of thing you expect in this day and age of political correctness and the threat of lawsuits that has us all walking around on metaphorical rice paper. But at the Washington Post, the good old days are here again, at least briefly, when veteran Washington Post Style editor Henry Allen punched a writer smack-dab in his chicklets.

It should perhaps be mentioned that the Style section of the Post is often derogatorily referred to as the “sandbox,” since it is often staffed with young and inexperienced reporters. The brouhaha went down like this: The editor said to the writers of the article, “This is total crap. It’s the second worst story I have seen in Style in 43 years.” One of the writers said back to him, “Don’t be such a coc**ucker!” Well, nobody calls Allen a coc**ucker. An ass*ole, sure, a dic*wad, okay, but not a coc**ucker. So Allen threw the reporter to the floor and let the fists fly, right in front of the big boss’ office. Bad move.

Allen was later called into his boss’ office, the door solemnly shutting behind him. His contract is up later this year. He probably wont be back. Who has time to worry about the quality of work anyway?

Allenl is almost 70 years old and a former Marine who served in Vietnam. In 2000, he won the Pulitzer Prize for Criticism. I think both his military training and his criticism skill helped him here. Truth is, he misses the old days, when newspapers meant something, and editors would say, “I don’t care what you have to do, just bring me that story! Occasionally, if you were lucky, you might even hear, “Stop the presses!” You think they stop the presses nowadays? Do you know how much it costs to stop the presses? Besides, the presses probably aren’t even in the building, but across town, the state, the country, or even the world. Who the hell knows anymore.

Hey, that gives me an idea. That sounds like a story. A BIG story. Excuse me while I speak to my staff.

“Stop the Internet! I’ve got a story!”

(Information for this story came from the Washingtonian, in a story by Harry Jaffe, Nov. 2nd, 2009.)

(Correction: Thanks to notification by the brother of the stlyle editor of the Washington Post, this article as been corrected. It originally reported that style editor Ned Martell threw the punch, but he didn’t. He assigned the story, but it was Sr. Editor Henry Allen who through the punch. – CC)

Paul: I had a good, loud laugh at that one. Started my day. Thanks. I have seen the Menjou/Pat O’Brien one. It’s – to me- the superior of the film versions – but I saw it at the Rep many, many years ago, maybe before we were students there, and it was fantastic. A good production of the stage version is the optimal way to see it, at least for me. I can see how a bad production could really be bad though.

I know what you mean about having to punch yourself. I don’t ever get punched either, they just don’t hire me anymore, which hurts far worse than getting punched but keeping your job.

I remember that Rep production! Ellen played one of her series of old bags (she’s almost old enough now for the roles she got at Loretto-Hilton). I’ll keep my eyes open for the Menjou film, because I do love that play.

As for employment, I’m about ready to start writing cover letters in my own blood – it makes poetic sense, and it might get some type of response, which is more than I get now.

Yeah, that must have been when we were students: I remember it vividly, along with the bags Ellen played in “House of Blue Leaves” and “Eccentricities of a Nightingale.” Considering that Maggie Winn was their perennial leading lady, I think Ellen would have been a step up in looks, but that’s just me. Her husband, Mike Genovese, got a great write-up in Variety for playing the editor in “Front Page” – I’d love to see it.
Paul

I must be getting senile. I worked on “Blue Leaves” and don’t remember her from that, but I remember Maggie from “Nightengale.” Now, I remember Ellen from Tom Jones, but I’m pretty sure that was before I was a student (wouldn’t you know that’s the one I would remember her from: a raunchy show with those “cleavage” period costumes. When I lived in Chicago, I went to see her and Genevose do a small play called the “Pokey,” with Ellen in a small town jail and Genevose as the Sheriff, and then I saw her on Broadway do “Do Patent Leather Shoes Really Reflect Up.” She was, of course, excellent in both, as was Genevose.

Here’s a website, Locate TV, that you can get to tell you the next time a particular movie is going to be on television. This is the page for Adolph Menjou if you’re interested. The next time it’s scheduled, you’ll get an email. Heres the link:http://www.locatetv.com/person/adolphe-menjou/29251

Hey, thanks for the link. Ellen played the oldest nun in “Blue Leaves.” Her big moment was kneeling beside the television, ordering another sister to take her picture: “Get me with Jackie Kennedy!” But “Tom Jones” was before I arrived. I also wish I’d seen her do “Midsummer Night’s Dream,” or anything by Shakespeare. I saw her and Mike in a play whose title escapes me, a meditation on the lasting evil of Viet Nam in which the big revelation was that Mike’s character, who had to bury radioactive waste of some sort, which had sterilized him, now went out with a friend to jack off on the burial site. I’m not sure where that leaves us in terms of Viet Nam, except that it was a very bad thing. However, they were great, and gave me a ride into the city after the show. I miss her terribly – she and Jacobina were my favorites.

Oh, yes. I remember her in “Blue Leaves” now. That Vietnam play you saw sounds atrocious, but she and Mike were always fun to watch. She was my favorite too, and Jacobina, of course, who was I think everyone’s favorite.

To Steve Martel, comment above: Thank you. You are correct. While several sources have minor discrepancies, this one’s all mine. You brother, Ned Martel assigned the story to the reporters but it was Sr. Editor Henry Allen who threw the punch. The story has been corrected, as well as a notice of said correction. Thanks for the information.