Screw Minimalism—I Love Having Stuff, and I'm Not Afraid to Admit It

Clutter brings me joy, and it turns out that's okay.

My parents may not fit the textbook definition of hoarders, but they definitely have some hoarder tendencies. My father seemingly has never thrown away a magazine or a bill—ever. And my mother’s handbag is basically a portable storage unit. She’s always complaining that her shoulder hurts, probably because she’s lugging around every receipt ever handed to her, two bottles of water, and at least 600 after-dinner mints.

It was inevitable some of that would rub off on me. I live in constant fear that friends will pop by my apartment unannounced. They wouldn’t understand the random piles and disorganization: the stack of unused clothes hangers still in the living room after the last time I did laundry, my coat closet overflowing to the point where I can’t shut the door despite the fact that there are just my jackets in there and no one else’s.

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I love having stuff. I like knowing that I’ve got the menu for every restaurant in the neighborhood even though I rarely get takeout. And if I ever need a rubber band (which, okay, hasn’t happened yet), there is a colorful cast of thousands in my kitchen drawer. But with the spotlight currently on the KonMari Method, a system for conquering one’s clutter, and my perky frenemy Pinterest guilting everyone into curating their whole life, should I feel bad about all this stuff? Do I need to purge?

Colorado-based clinical psychologist Jill Squyres, Ph.D., says clutter doesn’t necessarily deserve its bad rep. “How we define clutter is kind of personal,” she says, adding that some people like their space to be bare bones, while others find comfort in surrounding themselves with their favorite things. She gives the example of the Murano glass cats on her desk, explaining that she loves them, but another person might see them as taking up much-needed real estate. “I absolutely don’t think a little clutter is terrible,” says Squyres. “I don’t see anything wrong with liking stuff.” Okay, but when does it become more than a little clutter? “When you need something and can’t find it, you have too much stuff,” she says.

One tenet of the KonMari Method is getting rid of possessions that do not “spark joy,” but Squyres says that might be a bit extreme. “Sparking joy is too high a standard for most day-to-day objects,” she points out, adding that KonMari also doesn’t fully account for sentimental value (or, in my case, wanting to help someone who is desperately in need of an elastic).

And we shouldn’t worry so much that we’re on the cusp of hoarderdom just because we don’t want to throw away everything but the clothes on our back. (I guess I owe Mom and Dad an apology.) “It’s hoarding when it’s causing significant distress or discomfort in your life,” says Squyres. “It’s okay if [your stuff] makes you feel comfortable and at home, it’s useful, you like it, and/or it has meaning.”

Bolstered by this, I decided to embrace organizing my things instead of shedding them. I finally took the hangers out of the living room. I used the KonMari folding technique on my jeans (which involves folding them into thirds so you're making a perfect square) and I even found one pair that I could bear to give away. But the legion of rubber bands will forever remain in the kitchen drawer. If you need one, feel free to pop by. Just text first.

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