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Thursday, October 6, 2016

Does Appearance Matter in Choosing A Life Partner?

I always pray God gives me a husband like my dad in terms of intelligence and smartness except a man with his temperament... Thankfully am in love with a man who is more like my dad but his temperament is far worse than my dad, he gets angry at any slightest provocations although it doesn't last for long.
Ma please my problem with this guy is how he gets angry. I love him very much but friends seem not to be comfortable with him.. They always say he doesn't look responsible may be because of the way he dresses, but he is a very homely and kind person...
He plans coming to see my parent by December but am scared my dad will say the same thing my friends are saying, and my mum is already against where he is from..
I have another suitor and my friends seems comfortable with him because they say he looks responsible (actually he looks more responsible)and I should go for the second guy...
Ma please does ones appearance really matter in making a choice of a life partner?
How can he work on his temperament, although he is trying in that aspect..
Thanks and God bless you....

If you want to marry for your friends, then you may consider their own choice of man that will be good for you but if you wish to marry your own husband and a man that you're comfortable with and at peace with, please learn to focus more on what's important to you than your friends.You desired an intelligent and smart man with good temperament and God blessed you with a smart, intelligent and temperamental man.What you need to do is work with him and create an enabling environment for him to grow and readjust to the kind of man that you desire.When your friends say that he looks irresponsible, what do they know of him? If your friends know him so well that they can perceive that he's not responsible, then why are you dating him if you can't tell how responsible he is?Responsibility is not a function of his appearance, but a function of his capacity to attend to your needs, his needs and the needs of the family. If he's preparing for introduction, it's an evidence that he's a responsible man who perhaps doesn't know how to package himself.So what you need to do now is help him learn how to package himself, and then work on his temperament.If you are deeply in love with him, and he have those virtues and values that you admire in your partner, you will be able to convince your family of his personality and his maturity as a man.So don't worry yourself about what your friends say but focus more on what you need and what you can do to help your partner overcome his weaknesses and shortcomings as an individual.You may encourage him to seek counselling or enrol for an emotional intelligence programme to help him understand his emotions, and learn how to manage it his emotions in addition to prayers and meditation of the word of God.