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Wednesday, December 11, 2013

LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS AND ISLAM- WHAT'S RIGHT AND WHAT'S NOT

Some of you might not agree with what I'm going to tell here, but please spare a few minutes to read it. Love, relationships and Islam.... It's really something that needs to be talked about, and that too particularly in the present times, where not many people understand the gravity of entering into a haraam relationship.

At a young age, it's natural that you may have an attraction for the opposite sex and Islam teaches us on how to control it. And why should you control it? Because when you enter into a relationship, you lose your modesty, your dignity, your virtue and your respect. I know- almost everyone has a boyfriend/girlfriend, but that doesn't mean you should as well. Forgive me for saying this, but friends are usually the main reason for your getting into a relationship. If you choose a good friend, he/she will advise you against it. That's what a real friend would do. And if your friends have relationships themselves, you would naturally incline that way too. This is why Islam stresses so much in choosing the best friends.

“A good friend and a bad friend are like a perfume-seller and a blacksmith: The perfume-seller might give you some perfume as a gift, or you might buy some from him, or at least you might smell its fragrance. As for the blacksmith, he might singe your clothes, and at the very least you will breathe in the fumes of the furnace.” [Bukhari, Muslim]

Getting into a relationship may seem tempting, but trust me, I have seen and heard enough to know that it is the total opposite. Why do we need to go looking for love in the haraam way when Allah Ta'ala has already chosen someone for us. And when the time is right, Allah will reunite you with your spouse, In Sha Allah. This takes patience, yes, but in the meantime, why should you go looking for the wrong person when Allah has written down someone perfect for you?

Let me make this clear: love is not haraam or halaal. It's a natural emotion we are all created with. But what follows your attraction is what matters and we are definitely accountable for how we get carried away with these feelings. Remember that Islam never restricts anything for us: it just shows us a purer, more beautiful and perfect alternative. And in the case of love, it's a natural feeling, but when you go seeking for it in any means that Islam has prohibited, then that definitely is haraam, and Islam has shown us a pure alternative for it in the form of marriage.

Males interacting with females and vice versa is prohibited in Islam, and all types of 'dating' has no room in our religion. It might seem to be something really attractive, but it's not. Wallahi, you can never achieve love in the haraam way. If you seek it that way, there would be no blessings in it, and it would never be long-lasting. How can we ever expect to find happiness when we have been disobeying Allah? How can we expect happiness and love when we look for it in the haraam way?

Love is definitely not how it is portrayed in movies. Real-life is so much more different, and have you noticed that generally when love in movies end with marriage, it only actually starts afterwards? Don't get carried away with what you see in movies. It's nothing but a false facade and the truth it what Islam teaches us.

Don't ever enter into a haram relationship and hope to end it in the halaal way. Remember, that intentions are everything. You can never expect there to be love, barakah or happiness in your marriage life when you have sought it through haraam ways.

All what I have said may seem harsh to some of you, but it's the truth. If you do have any relationships, end it for the Sake of Allah. It's definitely not worth it at all. It will cost you your happiness and may Allah forbid, but it may even cost you your Jannah. Is that worth it?

And as for those who have entered into their marriage through haraam relationships, remember that so long as you seek Allah and seek His forgiveness, He will cleanse you and give you genuine love and happiness. After all, isn't this what we all want?

"Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. " May Allah make us all benefit from it, In Sha Allah!