Lindy West

A 26-year-old Tulsa man was arrested this weekend after pulling out his penis in the middle of a Walmart and masturbating it "with a back and forth motion." The incident follows another arrest last November, when a different man was caught masturbating in a different Tulsa Walmart. I guess some people really LOVE A BARGAIN.

Two witnesses "identified Bennett as the man who was masturbating in the middle of Walmart," according to a police report. Store surveillance footage reviewed by a cop showed Bennett removing his penis from his khaki shorts and "masturbating with a back and forth motion." In a post-arrest interview, Bennett reportedly "admitted to pulling it out in Walmart but thought he was not seen."

Bennett was charged with two counts of indecent exposure and booked into jail, where he is being held in lieu of $10,000 bond. He is scheduled for a June 20 court appearance.

Bennett ran away from the Walmart before the cops got there, but was later pulled over in his car and arrested.

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Yo, men of Tulsa, since you seem to be low on ideas, I put on my thinking cap and came up with some suggestions for better places to masturbate: Your house. Another private space over which you have dominion. A hotel room. A consenting partner's house. The back of a tinted van. The remote wilderness. On a raft or dinghy in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.