Because nothing is ever done until you decide it’s done. You have not failed until you decide not to get back up.

We all do stupid things and mess up and go unconscious. In Buddhism, it has a name: Unskillful. I love this. It simply means you didn’t have the skills yet.

(And as far as I know, Buddha never once used the phrase, “Wow, you totally fucked that one up.”)

The question is this:

How do you know you’ve ruined everything?

A word like “sabotage” requires that you give in to the belief that “all is lost.” Like you have your very own entertainment industry executive in your head who says, “You’ll never work in this town again!”

And the problem is not that he’s there.

The problem is you believe him.

Sabotage As Your Teacher

If you have a knack for sabotage, then guess what? This pattern is actually your greatest teacher.

And what it might be teaching you is persistence. Or commitment. These are key here. You can either sit back and say, “Look how awful I am. I’ve done it again.”

Or you can say, “I’m learning to commit. So, today is another day. And with eyes wide open, I begin imperfectly.”

It will be painful. It will be uncomfortable. It will piss you off. And it will grow you in ways you can’t imagine.

I know from my own experience, it’s challenging to have an emotional temperament and go for your dreams. It’s so much easier to sit back and say that it’s all too hard, or that I’m not cut out for this.

But when you engage those voices, you only elongate the story, continue the trance.

Instead, take steps, and take them with openness.

(And for the love of all that is holy, stop using the word “sabotage.”)

Be Unbelievably Kind to Yourself

The opposite of the voices that say “All is lost!” is reminding yourself that all has never been lost. And remember how far you’ve come in your process. Monitor how you talk to yourself. Stop and correct any self-punishment. It only serves to keep the pattern alive.

In your story, you have the opportunity to be the one who is kind and the one who persists in knowing that you’re never going to give up on yourself or your life. Whenever you shift into that unconscious mode, just gently walk yourself back home and start from there.

Do that for yourself constantly.

And then do it again.

This is how we break the pattern of sabotage.

The post What to Do When You Keep Sabotaging Your Own Success appeared first on Christine Kane's Blog.