09/06/2015

A cautionary tale in the news today. It's the story of a worker, struggling through life like the rest of us. One day his bosses found a can or beer under his desk. OK, drinking is bad but you can see why some people who work in offices might need a little something to help them though. You can tell that you need alcohol to deal with co-workers because where's the only place you socialise with them? Yep, the pub.

The company in question had strict rules against drinking at work. The company isn't named in this news story but I think we can guess it's not British Airways.

The worker was written up for having drink at work. Oh, the shame of such a warning, and the entry on his permanent record could've affected his career success in the future, but thankfully the truth can save him, he wasn't drinking at work. That wasn't a real can of beer. It was a sex toy.

Oh, well, that's OK then. As long as you weren't drinking at work.

I don't know if the company had any rules about not having a crafty wank on the job. If it's not in the HR manual he's got them banged to rights.

Some may say that a can you stick your knob in is somehow worse than a can with beer in it – it certainly makes the need for a coaster rather worrying – but what do they know?