A man accused of killing his siblings last year appeared in a Colorado courtroom on Friday, where he shocked his family in attendance by saying he “couldn’t stop thinking about killing.”

As CrimeOnline previously reported, Malik Vincent Murphy, 19, allegedly stabbed his brother, Noah, 5, and his sister, Sophia, 5, in their family home off of 900 block of Carlisle Street in Colorado Springs, in Oct. According to court records, Murphy admitted to the stabbings and said he thought his little sister screamed while he stabbed her, although he wasn’t certain. He said he stabbed Sophia three times, then stabbed Noah three times, killing them both.

Murphy is also accused of wounding his father, Jefferson Murphy, during the attack by stabbing him in the neck as the dad made his way to basement in the home to confront his son. Despite his injuries, Jefferson Murphy held the suspect down until police arrived. His mother and two other younger siblings, ages 12 and 17, also in the home at the time, were not injured.

KOAA reports that during his hearing on Friday, Murphy avoided eye contact with his parents as court officials played an interview conducted between him and detectives shortly after the attack. Murphy reportedly admitted to authorities that he hadn’t been taking his medication for depression and anti-social personality disorder when the attack occurred, and that he “can’t stop thinking about killing,” and that the thoughts happen “like everyday.”

The suspect reportedly told police that he bought the knife he used in the attack months prior and kept it hidden in his bedroom. He couldn’t explain why he felt the urge to kill, but allegedly said it was something he felt he had to do.

“I don’t even understand myself,” Murphy said to detectives.

The Denver Post reports that Murphy had been committed at least three times previously to AspenPointe’s Lighthouse psychiatric facility in Colorado Springs. He also went to the Highlands Behavioral Health in Littleton, in 2016, where a therapist said that he talked of killing his family. The mental health worker noted that this suspect’s mother at the time seemed to not take the threats seriously.

In March 2017, Murphy borrowed his parents’ SUV, supposedly to go on a job interview. Instead, he drove the vehicle to Effingham, where he lit it on fire and stood on the side of the road, watching the SUV burn in flames.

At the end of the hearing, which was held to see if the teen would stand trial, Judge G. David Miller ruled that the suspect would indeed stand trial on two counts of murder, one count of attempted murder, and a sentence enhancer of weapons charges.