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Author
Topic: Miss Lily (Read 6634 times)

I had to take Miss Lily in this morning for surgery to remove a couple of hard lumps on her belly. I had no idea the surgery would be this invasive. I imagined a small incision and done with.

The vet isn't sure what the rock hard masses are and we'll have to wait for the pathology reports. It isn't mammary masses or fatty masses.

He did indicate that when he palpated them prior to surgery that she cried out in pain. I was like, yeah, that's what I've told you the other 2 times I brought her in. Now we can continue our healing process together and start walking more often.

The nasty looking belly

My lovely gal resting

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Thanks guys. I've been up most of the night constantly checking on her. She's finally drinking and eating a little so that's a great sign. I feel like such a horrible parent for allowing this to get out of hand to this point. I kept taking her to the vet and they were dismissive.

She is a beautiful dog, but she'd be upset that I posted an ungroomed photo. Between my injuries and her illness, I've not been able to groom her for a while. So in her honor, I'm posting a picture of her after I groomed her this summer.

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I think she's playing me a little bit now. I purchased some Grreat Choice Homestyle recipe dog food. She wouldn't come out of her bed, even for that. I sat and fed her some from a spoon and she was loving it. As soon as I stood up to move away, she QUICKLY followed me.

She has went and done her outside business and is eating and drinking so I'm getting less and less concerned. I just couldn't deal with it right now if something bad happened to her. She's the last remaining reminder of the life I previously led. I'm also convinced that she's what pulled me through my last illness. My only fear of dying was worrying about what would happen to her.

She laid right by my side for several months so I owe her the same. She appreciates the kind words is now expecting recovery gifts. She's also a size small/petite and likes most colors.

Thanks again all!

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Happy to report that Miss Lily is doing much better than I had expected. She is more lively than she has been for a long time. I'm beginning to think this was affecting her long before the lumps were noticed. I attributed her slowing down to old age but I'm seeing the vibrant gal I fell in love with. She doesn't look a day over 10, but is 12.

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I took my little gal in today for her follow up. The vet was holding his folder and indicated that we needed to discuss her pathology reports. I had a strange feeling come over me and I flashbacked to entire conversation with the person who gave me my own diagnosis.

Then I heard the words; "metastatic mammary gland carcinoma". I almost didn't maintain composure. We discussed it for a little while and I only retained a portion of what he said. I have been researching nonstop, hoping his prognosis and recommendations were wrong. He indicates that nothing additional can be done and we just need to watch her for worsening signs and be prepared for difficult decisions in the future.

We came home and napped for several hours together. I just needed to snuggle with her and cry. From all I was told and learned since, it could be anywhere from a few weeks to a year.

Wolfie

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I was so hoping that Miss Lily would be OK. I know what it's like to have this sort of thing happen, and it rips the heart right out of a person.

She has you to love her and to be there for her. She has had a fortunate experience on this planet, having been lucky enough to have found you. I hope you two treasure your remaining time together.

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Wolfie, I am sorry to hear this. Our pets are members of our families. We lost our first dog about a year ago. It was awful. She was with us since 1996. She really was like a daughter, but more like a best friend. She went with us everywhere. She was always there, even when humans weren't.

My brothers dog was given just weeks to live. That was back in 2004. She went on to live 6 more years. Just keep giving her all that love and she may just prove the vet wrong.

I've been reminding myself all day of yet another great piece of advice that I heard spoken at our memorial. Instead of of longing for what we had and what we'll miss out on, be grateful for what was. Cherish and remember that love, and it can never be taken away from you.

I'm determined to enjoy what time remains and acquire a few more great memories.

Greg

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My heart aches knowing what I have to do soon. i did everything possible and now its time to make dicciucult decisions

Wolfie,

I am so sorry to hear this. It is such an awful decision. I hate to even think about having to be in your shoes. I was fortunate to not have to make that decision with our Kacey. I hope I never have to make that decision.

I wish you strength through this difficult time. Besides losing a human family member, it is the next hardest thing in life, to lose a four-legged family member. You will know that you did all you could. I honestly believe she knows that. I really believe dogs know how much they are loved.

My heart aches knowing what I have to do soon. i did everything possible and now its time to make dicciucult decisions

Wolfie,

So sorry to hear this -- I've made that decision in the past also -- I know what you are going through. It won't make it easy now, but in time you will draw comfort in knowing that your decision is based on Miss Lily and what is best for her.

Thanks to you all. I sent an email this morning to the vet and cried the entire time I was typing it. I'm totally torn between my selfish need to cling to her and knowing that I can't allow her to suffer.

She has developed another huge mass on her backside that is causing obvious distress. She can barely go up and down the steps. She cries out in pain if you touch her anywhere near that area.

My mother said we need to take her in for another surgery but I am torn. It's not the money thing as much as knowing she's never going to be healed. At what point do others make these difficult decisions?

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Greg,you could ask the vet but my guess is that he would say that it might be risky and most likely wouldn't add a great deal of time.it's a tough decision but I think I would avoid surgery.I could be wrong.hope it doesn't make me appear heartless.whatever you decide to do would be understandable.it's one of the most difficult choices I have ever had to make in my life.it came down to quality of life.you know Lily best.I will be thinking of you.m.

Is she in constant pain, or does it come and go? Does she still have a decent quality of life-- likes to eat, play sometimes, etc?

As I've mentioned, our dog developed bad hip problems. During her last year, we had to carry her outside, but she could still walk enough to do her business. She would sometimes fall down in her poop, and we'd have to wash her off. Some thought we should have her put to sleep. But, she was still a happy dog. She loved to eat. She still played with the other dogs as best she could. And, she liked to boss them around. We had her on medicine to help her hip and the pain.

If our dog was in constant or frequent pain and had changed to where she no longer had much of a life, we would have made the decision. Well, I hope I could make that decision, for her. She ended up getting bloat, where the stomach twists from gas, and she died very quickly. We didn't have to make that decision. You know what Miss Lily's quality of life is. Is she still a fairly happy dog, despite her illness? Or, is she usually miserable?

Again, I am sorry her health is in decline and you're faced with this decision. I wish you all the best, as you decide what's best for her.

first let me preface this by saying I'm sorry to hear this sad news about Lily and I'm sorry if my post rambles along. You know I just buried one of my dogs a few weeks ago and I just got another one back from the vet after a surgery. I understand all too well the thoughts in your head at this moment.

I'm so sorry to hear this Wolfie. You know when Aries was just in surgery the other day, I kept expecting the vet would call to tell me some awful news. But thankfully he thinks both 14 yr old cockers seem well enough for a few more years. Of course, at this age and with their health issues, either of them could just as easily pass away within the next few days.

I have had to make "the decision" 9 times now. why, oh why did they never pass away in their sleep?? My only consolation has been that neither Randy nor Jim were alive and had to bear this burden or this sorrow. Making these kinds of medical decisions and losing 2 husbands and 9 children so far has been something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

As to making that decision, since I have had to do it with my partners and my dogs, my suggestion is sooner rather than later. I have waited a few times, not too long I didn't think; but so long that looking back I realized that I had actually done my dogs a disservice by dragging a sad, and inevitable, situation out too long.

like mitch, I hope this doesn't make me sound heartless. Instead I think of myself as humane. (oh, I'm not saying I don't have guilt; but I made decisions for the right reasons and I stuck to those reasons and decisions)

When Joxer had that stroke a few weeks ago, I was forced into deciding again. I'm sure I could have waited a few days; but how much would he have suffered, or not even understood, in those final few days? And all because I would have been greedy and wanted just one more day. (Sadly, that could be another of my many mottoes - I just wanted one more day.) Instead I made the hard choice because I have seen how transitory life is. I spent 15 wonderful years with Joxer; and I made the choice to not taint those memories by dragging out the end

After 9 dogs and 2 humans, I've come to understand that death is inevitable and no matter what I do, there's no holding it back. The only thing I can do it try to make it not so bad, and ease them from this world to the next.

For me and my pet healthcare decisions, money does matter. I just spent the entire amount I made working for those special events of the Task Force to have surgery done to the tumor on Aries and to treat the tumor in Zeus' ear. (and that didn't even cover the tumor on Zeus' leg that decided to bleed some today. oy!); but the outcome after treatment is supposed to be very positive. So much for adding to the car fund. However if I had not just gotten that money, I would have had no option but the cheaper one of having him put to sleep.

What's the outcome for Lily if you have another surgery? Will the surgery give Lily much time? Will she still be unable to manage the stairs etc. while she recovers? Is she in pain?

It's a tough and terrible decision and I don't envy any one who has to contemplate it. In the end, vets are usually too ambiguous, and we ourselves are ill-equipped to think ourselves knowledgeable, much less worthy, to make such an important decision of the very question of life and death. Think about it, and make your decision. If you have to make the ultimate decision, remember you are doing it for all the right reasons - LOVE LOVE LOVE. Miss Lilly couldn't have asked for a better human to care for her than you.

Again all, thanks for the kind words. I spoke with the vet and he indicates it's really not beneficial for her to have another surgery. Because her cancer has reached her blood system, the progression will be rapid.

He has a pain script ready for me to pick up and I've made preliminary arrangements. I managed to take her for a little walk and she looked so exhausted after just a short distance.

And no, I didn't read any of the comments as heartless. I really appreciate all the concern.

Wolfie, (as usual) I'm late in checking in...it sounds like it's time to do what's best for her. I was reading what you posted earlier about the pain in her backside and I came to this conclusion, although again, it's too late: I was going to tell you that if it hurts her to wag her tail, it's definitely time. I'm thinking "wag her tail" could be applied to anything: eat, breath, walk...but wagging their tails is one measure of happines that is universal...

I wish you the peace you deserve as much as the peace and love you give to Miss Lily.

I'm taking her back to the vet after having a bit of a "heated" discussion with him. I've taken her in several times with the same complaint. First they said it was rectal glands that I paid to have cleaned and she continued with the issue. Then they found the mamary lumps with they said were causing it. She still continued having issues and he said it was the surgery.

A follow up appt and I was told again, that the surgery was the culprit. So, after excessive appointments and expense, she still has same issues that we originally sought relief for. I'm now advocating for her the same way I have with my own health and not concerned with upsetting them.

Something has been missed.

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I took her in and was treated much differently this time. It wasn't the typical 4 minute consultation which is something I also dealt with in the past. I wasn't quite sure why the vet's elderly father was there also, but am grateful for him being there. She has developed a pelvic bone tumor. She has an aggressive form of cancer. The vet explained all the options including the whole chemo thing but his father spoke to me with such compassion that I directed my questions towards him.

He again explained the realistic outcome regardless. As I fought back tears (unsuccessfully), I managed to ask all the appropriate questions. She has lost 20% of her body mass and is now in palliative stages.

The only positive of all this, is seeing how my mother and I have finally managed to become closer. When it became necesary that I move home, she didn't want an animal in the house. She wasn't fond at first but came to love Miss Lily. Everybody does. I know she recognizes that my doggy is what saved me.

I view my mother in a different light now, seeing what she's doing. She warms beef broth to pour over her food to soften it and has declared that it's OK if she eats whatever she wants.

Again, I thank you guys for your warm responses. For those who don't have a bond with a furry friend, it's probably difficult to understand. I became accustomed to loosing humans, but this is different.

wolfie

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I am at a loss for words so forgive me . I am one of those guys like you who loves my dog with all my heart . My dog is old and sick most of the time now and she doesn't have much time left , its hard when you love them so much and they are old or sick , all we can do is love them and do what we must to make sure they don't suffer .

Well I made that awful phone call to schedule Miss Lily's final vet appointment. They said I could bring her over this afternoon which I promptly refused. I need a final day with her. It just feels awful that I've scheduled an appointment to end her precious little life. Tomorrow afternoon will definitely be one of most disturbing events in my life.

I only ever had to make this decision once for my Butchy who passed away just hours before his appointment. I was so relieved that it happened that way.

Again, thanks for all the support during this difficult journey.

Wolfie

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Wolfie , you are doing the compassionate thing and I commend you for it .

We who love our pets make a deal that we will give them the best life has to offer and dignity in the end . You are fulfilling your end of the deal to help her move on , you gave her a great life and she gave you unconditional love that you will always be able to cherish along with her memory . Hugs to you .

Having been through this before, I know how hard it is. As as pet owner, it is our responsibility to make sure our pets have a good life, even at the end. That doesn't mean it is easy, and scheduling the appointment makes it all quite real and inevitable. Make the most of your remaining time with Lily.

Hugs,

Henry

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I understand your pain, having just gone through this about a month back. As tough as tomorrow will be, know you are showing the greatest sign of love by putting Miss Lily's needs first. It shows how wonderful a companion you have been to her. However, I know how hard this time is right now. You will both be in my thoughts.HugsMike

As a fellow pet lover, I empathize with your courage to do what is best for Lily.

As a tribute to you both, I offer the following:

A DOG'S PRAYERBy Beth Norman Harris

Treat me kindly, my beloved master, for no heart in all the world is more grateful for kindness than the loving heart of me.

Do not break my spirit with a stick, for though I should lick your hand between the blows, your patience and understanding will more quickly teach me the things you would have me do.

Speak to me often, for your voice is the world's sweetest music, as you must know by the fierce wagging of my tail when your footsteps fall upon my waiting ear.

When it is cold and wet, please take me inside, for I am now a domesticated animal, no longer used to bitter elements. And I ask no greater glory than the privilege of sitting at your feet beside the hearth. Though had you no home, I would rather follow you through ice and snow than rest upon the softest pillow in the warmest home in all the land, for you are my god and I am your devoted worshiper.

Keep my pan filled with fresh water, for although I should not reproach you were it dry, I cannot tell you when I suffer thirst. Feed me clean food, that I may stay well, to romp and play and do your bidding, to walk by your side, and stand ready, willing and able to protect you with my life should your life be in danger.

And, beloved master, should the great Master see fit to deprive me of my health, do not turn me away from you. Rather hold me gently in your arms as skilled hands grant me the merciful boon of eternal rest--and I will leave you knowing with the last breath I drew, my fate was ever safest in your hands.