And now, a sex robot sucking on a sausage. Do not click on this unless you want to be severely disturbed. Last I checked, that included oh… all of you. You’re already watching it, aren’t you. Crazy, right? I like how the video says “You can imagine what else she likes to suck on!” Gosh, are you sure I can, Sexbot video? I’m not very creative! I hope this isn’t an actual product, but a way to ferret out people who should be on the sex offender registry. “Check out our new sausage-sucking sexbot! She’s got three working orifices, including a fully-functional uncanny valley!” And it has all the unblinking eyes and rigor mortis lips to which I’ve become accustomed?! Hold the phone while I find my hooker-skinned wallet! [Fark]

Since this is as good of a place to state this observation as any, The Mighty Feklahr thought He would narrate some observations/pontifications of the movie Juno He made last night when He caught it channel surfing whilst loaded on beer and the last of His vicodin:

1. First and foremost, it seems like many people accolade this movie for all the wrong reasons. The cutesy dialogue and kitschy-pseudo-hipster themes were probably the least compelling aspects to a movie that had such surprisingly well developed characters.

2. Jennifer Garner is in this? Who knew??? I guess because she didn’t talk on a hamburger phone, her solid performance deserves no attention.

3. The teenagers were REAL. Real kids with emotional/psychological/intellectual shortcomings. They didn’t know it all, and they didn’t have it all figured out.

4. The commercials on Oxygen are fucking horrid, and any human being that routinely watches that channel needs to be sterilized.

So, the short version is, Juno is actually a decent movie, but not for any of the reasons that get widely discussed.

02.01.11 at 10:38 am

Erswi

Durst’lhr

02.01.11 at 12:50 pm

Asher

I just think it’s nice to see someone giving Goldie Hawn a shot at resurrecting her career.

02.01.11 at 1:51 pm

TheSheepMafia

My only regret is not having that song at my wedding. Especially since that robot was already one of the bridesmaids.

02.01.11 at 5:07 pm

TheSheepMafia

“This video is no longer available because the YouTube account associated with this video has been terminated.”