Lived around the corner from Brad and Angelina! (There they are, to the left of that pink house with green shutters. This photo was taken from our bathroom.) According to my binoculars, they were never there. New Orleans.

Friday, December 30, 2011

Ever written a note to a coworker? Roommate? And were you just a little more bold than you would have been in real life? Did you know that there is an internet website dedicated to the sole purpose of documenting and exposing those passive aggressive notes? Remember that next time you're tempted to warn others to keep their hands off your food in the work fridge.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

While in Costa Rica, I was talking to an older gentleman about my next big travel dream, in which I fly to France, pop over to Switzerland (where I'll meet my niece Karley for an epic snowboarding extravaganza) and then get on the train. I'll head up to Denmark, over to Poland and then make my way down down down through Eastern Europe seeing as much as I can on the way to Greece and Turkey. Then I bop on over to Egypt and the Middle East and finally fly to India/Nepal/Burma, stay there for several months and then come home via Japan.

(And it might even happen if I could ever make more than $35 in tips during a shift at the Lodge. Stupid ice...)

Anyway, he had a reason why I should NOT go to any of those places. The two most memorable were:

Turkey.

This man was quite sure I would be kidnapped and then sold into the sex trade -- "they love the blonde haired/blue eyed's, you know". My roommate Nicole squashed that notion by informing him that I'm too old for that. Ouch.

India.

"They don't have toilets in India. People go to the bathroom in the streets. And, you -- being blonde haired/blue eyed, people are going to want to see what you look like down there."

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

When I was growing up, my family managed an apartment complex in South International Falls, Minnesota. All of us six kids had chores to do, including mowing the lawn, shoveling the sidewalks, picking up trash, etc. As a family we painted each unit between renters. My job was to scrub with a Brillo pad the plastic baseboards to remove any paint splatters that happened while the older kids paint-rolled the walls.

In addition to all of that, once a week we were each responsible to tidy the common areas of one of the buildings. This meant picking up cigarette butts, vacuuming hallways and stairs, sweeping and mopping the laundry rooms and wiping walls and laundry machines as needed. You can read about our compensation for this work here.

One day my dad came into the house, brandishing a fresh, crisp $20 bill. "Kady!" he called, "Look what I found behind the washing machine in your building!" I immediately began spending saving that money in my mind. For an actual minute I really thought he was going to give ME the money he found in MY building. Ha.

Instead, he folded it slowly and dramatically placed it in his wallet. "If only you had done a better job of cleaning, this could have been yours", he said, and shrugged his shoulders as if it really weren't his decision to make. (Remember that $20 when I was eight is the equivalent of about $1,000 today.)

You better believe that for the rest of my tenure as a cleaning person at the South Falls Apartments, I was scouring that laundry room with a toothbrush, hoping for another cash money windfall that never came. It was only last week that I asked my dad on the way to ice fishing if he really found that $20 bill behind the washing machine in my building.

"I never found a $20 bill in my life." He said.

Now THAT'S good parenting.

"Just take out your anger on this target Kady while I protect my hearing."

Sunday, December 25, 2011

New to A Lady Reveals Nothing? You've missed SO MUCH. Not to worry. Every Sunday, I dig through the archives to repost an old favorite. Mostly because I'm too lazy to come up with new content every single day. Enjoy! This story first appeared on September 2, 2010:

Kady Hexum Got Grossed Out:

Not possible, I know. But tonight I heard a real doozie at the Lodge. APPARENTLY, in Southern Indiana and other parts unknown in this country there are MEN who FREEZE bloody TAMPONS and thaw them out when it's time to go deer hunting. Then they tie them to tree limbs and wait for the big bucks to come in. These poor bucks think there's a doe having her embarrassing time and they go NUTS. And then the hunters shoot the big bucks. When I heard this story I buried my head in my hands. I could not believe it. GROSS!

I have a few questions:

What woman saves her used tampons for this purpose, or any other?

How do these women give the used tampons to the hunting men? Ziplock baggies? Tupperware?

Where are they frozen? The kitchen freezer, alongside popsicles and brocolli?

Does the hunting man touch the bloody tampon with his bare fingers? To tie it to the tree?

Where does the bloody tampon go once the deer is shot? Do they remain in the tree for all eternity?

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Finally home in northern, Northern Minnesota. The part of Minnesota where people's conversations revolve mainly around (depending on the time of year) the harvest, fishing, deer hunting, snow and ice conditions.

In an effort to secure my place as Favorite Daughter, I agreed to go ice fishing with my dad. Cold doesn't begin to describe it. Hopefully my photos capture that.

Eat your heart out, Kelly.

Lake of the Woods on the horizon.

Watch and wait. I should have brought my ice skates, for how perfectly smooth the ice was.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

The kind of girl you call when you spill on your laptop keyboard, because you know she'll know what to do? The kind of girl who actually catches fish on a Girls' Fishing weekend?

Creative?

Smart?

Beeeeee-utiful?

For me, this friend is Ashley. I call her -- affectionately -- Shash.

Well I asked The ol' McShash to do a link roundup for A Lady Reveals Nothing because man, she is good at this stuff! She's the one who clued me into postcardly.com. She's the one who introduced me to yesandyes.org. And she's the one who makes the Best. Mixed. Tapes. Ever.

So y'all. Check out these amazing links. Straight from the Shash:

_________________________

Do you know where the term “cup of joe” came from? I didn’t either. This comic explains 15 amazing facts about coffee.

If you live in the Midwest, you remember how horrible last winter was. It’s the end of December and we have hardly any snow, but they’re still predicting a re-run of last year. Hold onto your butts....

You probably don’t have 36 minutes to watch this lecture by illustrator Kate Bingman Burt, but you should definitely visit Kate’s website and take a look at her daily purchase drawings. Makes you think about your own consumption.

Doughnuts are the new cupcakes in the Twin Cities. Heavy Table, a Twin Cities based online food & drink magazine that focuses on the cuisine of the upper Midwest, made a handy flow chart to help you figure out where you should get your sugar fix!

Most of us take more photos with our phones than with “real” cameras these days, and everyone’s bad at getting prints made. I love the concept behind the new iOS & Android camera/photo printing app, Dotti. It acts like a disposable camera. When you’re done with the “roll” of 12 exposures they will print and send your photos right to your door!

I recently went to a Bon Iver concert with my husband and some friends. They were phenomenal, of course, but I really loved the opener too. Watch the take away show La Blogotheque did with Lianne La Havas. [BONUS: She’s walking through the streets of Paris, when it was warm out. Remember when it used to be summertime?]

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

In response to this article about Angelina Jolie, Facebook fans of US Weekly had this to say:

Why did I 'xxx' out their last names? I don't know...they don't really deserve anonymity, do they...having posted their comments on a PUBLIC FORUM? But, I'm making fun of these people, and I don't want them to google themselves and then kill me for revenge. (I tried to clean up the language a bit and so you're not reading an exact copy/paste below.)

Lauren xxxI agree that it is up to them and hell they could afford it so go ahead and its not like they have to worry about if they could handle it they are not the only ones trying to watch these kids like the rest of the normal people they are rich they have nannies and all that so hey more power to them

Tracey xxxI'm not really convinced with their lifestyle and schedules they can handle what they already have...but it's not my call or my decision...they will do what they want to do no matter what anyone thinks...

Janel xxxThey probably could because they can have nannies take care of the kids for them. They can afford that.

13 hours ago ·

Rosie xxxShe needed something to make headlines because she's probably bent out of shape that Jennifer Anniston got all the news outlets talking yesterday by being voted "sexiest woman ever" by the Men's Health poll. Haha

Crystal xxxWhat's wrong with having nannies? They are taking children into a home and giving them opportunities and a family they wouldn't have otherwise. Yeah, so they are working parents, they work to earn their money and they choose to spend some on ensuring there are additional people to help care for their children- a responsible choice. I have 4 children, my youngest, 4months old has Cystic Fibrosis, a terrible life threatening disease. If I had to/needed to work full time I would do whatever I had to to make sure I could hire a nanny/nurse to be in our home with her. No one knows their personal lives and nobody should. Just saying...why begrudge the success of other people? Create your own. Because personally, I'm just thankful I don't have to pay for their nannies- you know like how our tax dollars go to pay for free childcare for some people that have 5 and 6 kids and a sense of entitlement to go with them.

13 hours ago ·

Pat xxxWhy dont you concentrate on the ones you already have?Quit trying to mother the world and spend some real mommy time with the kids you have instead of putting it all on nannies.If I had didnt have to work,I couldve spent more quality time with my kids.You have that ,but still run off to make more.You only have one chance to be a kid.To bad your to busy to see that...Grow up..

Kelly xxxI hope not. I wonder how many milestones she's witnessed of her children...she's so busy being someone she's really not (look at her past) that she's missing out on the best part of having kids and they're missing out on having a real mother who's present in mind and body.

12 hours ago ·

Kylee xxxI love that the majority of people are commenting as if they know these people personally. You really don't. You don't know how many nannies they have. And even if they do, when you work, don't you have someone babysit your kids? If not a nanny, then a day-care, for sure. It's her body and their choice as a couple whether or not to have more children; same for those Duggars. People need to seriously stop judging so much. Do you want to be judged? Didn't think so.

12 hours ago ·

Richard xxxThey have enough money to handle 20 if they want.....love these two!

12 hours ago ·

Mike xxxThats funny s* right there... I could end up pregnant. lmfao.. WTF?? Keep your leg close and you might not end up pregnant. skanky

Jamie xxxshe is beautiful. & if she & brad pitt want to keep reproducing let them! if i looked like her & he was my boyfriend i'd probably have like 10 kids by now. haha ;)

11 hours ago ·

Rosalinda xxxI love how Kylee shields is commenting as if she knows any of these judgemental people personally. Kylie, you really don't. You don't know if they know Brad and Angelina or not. You don't know if they know Brad and Angelina's nannies. You don't know if they have kids or jobs. It's their opinion and their choice to voice their opinion as individuals or as a collective unit on a Facebook post that beckons their comments. Same for judging the Duggars. You need to seriously stop judging judgmenetal people so much. If you stop judging judgmental people, I will stop judging you for judging judgmental people. But I will not stop judging Brad and Angelina or the Duggars for that matter. I don't care if they have more kids. I just want him to stop saying things like perfunctory and impervious. I want him to take his shirt off and shut his mouth. I want her to put on about 5 pounds. If she gets up to 115 she'll be perfect.

Mandy xxx I kind of understand why they haven't gotten married. Marriage in Hollywood is kind of a bad omen. Not many people make it past 5 years together. Maybe not getting married is better when you're a celebrity.

Summer xxxMe and my man have only ever been with each other, and we have been engaged since June 5th 2002, but we have actually been living together for 11 years. And we have 4 gorgeous children together (our 3 girls and 1 boy are perfect to us we won't be having any more). At the moment we ar...e not married. I will marry him, when I feel the timing is right for both of us-he needs to be ready as much as I do. We have had the rings (diamond tiara ring and celtic mens band from 2004), since before our 2nd child came along in 2006. But eventually we want to sell our house and get a new one that we both think is our dream home. We also want to get a few things out of the way before we go ahead with a wedding-Wedding is a very special event between two people, and does not need to be rushed. Since relationships can't be rushed, and marriage-which focuses on a relationsip between two people really is the beginning of what is supposed to be a lifetime of love between two people. His parents are divorced and my parents are divorced. What is real happiness to me and anyone who loves my children, is that me and those that love my children are greatful for my 4 children existence in this world. So our 4 children are loved now and loved always and to one day make a life for themselves. All 4 of our children are kind hearted children, each with there own unique personality and there own looks. ED-Creative, Imaginative and thoughtful. Energetic. Son considerate and tolerant of others, he cares for his sisters, and wants to help look after the youngest 2 girls, comical and very sensitive. 2nd Daughter, driven and focused, enjoys role playing. Loves to interact with others-brings people together. 4th just 2 months-3rd Daughter, a sweet heavenly lotus flower, draws others to her, not shy, very alert, is always looking here and there. When you hold her she might look at you but then proceed to look to the side of her then look up and around, so she can take in all of the world around her. She is very content, like my 2nd daughter was as a baby.