Something to Keep in Mind When Looking for Your Match

When I think of the perfect match, I think of a few main things I look for, starting with honesty. Honesty is something imperative, and a main foundation for all relationships. And you really can’t change someone to have this quality. It’s one of those things that either someone is or isn’t. Therefore, most people would likely agree that when looking for their match and companion, they want someone who is honest, trustworthy, and who keeps their word.

We all want to be able to count on our partner, and know that in times of need or even desire, that they’ll be there for you and that you can depend on them. But also, I’m sure that we’d all like to be able to believe that, what our partner says is the absolute truth, rather than just hearing a version of the truth from them, or only learning certain bits of information about important matters. No one wants to be left in the dark or be with someone who carries major secrets that might influence their desire to be with them.

It’s important to give one another the benefit of the doubt, and to have a trusting heart, where you believe what each other says and where you don’t bring doubt and distrust into your relationship. We need to have faith in our partner and be able to trust and believe that not only their intentions are pure and righteous, but that they don’t say things that they don’t mean or make empty promises and whatnot. We all want our partner’s word to be as good as gold.

Although we can’t change a dishonest person or even demand and expect to have an open book type of relationship, we can set the tone and be the example of what we want. However, this sweet method doesn’t always work, because unfortunately, some people are very closed up and private, emotionally withdrawn, distant, and have no desire to share a lot of what the real picture is with others when they date or even explore relationships.

Some people simply prefer to have the type of relationship where they’re closed book and where they don’t feel the need to open up or share their innermost secrets and deep feelings with anyone, including their partner. If you’re dating someone like this, that’s up to you, but don’t expect that things will change in time or even with a tremendous amount of patience, because some people are simply private and desire to remain that way.

Having said all of the above, the best relationship, which I would also like to refer as a healthy, happy, and loving type of relationship, would be one where there’s an open book type of mentality and everything is on the table, and where trust and honesty go hand in hand. The type of relationship where you feel comfortable and at ease to open up and learn all about one another’s likes, dislikes, thoughts, opinions, and where you can comfortably share things with one another, and to do so without feeling ashamed, embarrassed, or judged.

We don’t have to agree on everything with our partner or with anyone for that matter. But what’s more important than anything, is to agree on major issues, but not to sweat the little things or make them a big issue when sometimes, it’s those little differences that provide the most fun and excitement for couples. You see, when we have differences, we get to experience new things in life and learn and grow from one another. And especially, when we’re open minded in doing so.

We should feel confident about who we are, and feel proud and secure with ourselves, despite where we’ve come from or the journey that has led us to where we are now and today. We need to remember that acceptance is something that we all desire to feel, and especially by our partner, but that we should be accepting of our partner as well. We should love the good and accept the bad. Don’t look for or expect to find perfection. We all want to feel loved, and what makes someone feel loved the most depends on the person, but many times, it’s being able to trust them and know that no matter what, they won’t judge them for their differences, for what they share, or for being honest about their true feelings.

Anne Cohen is a lifestyle and relationship blogger based in Los Angeles, CA. Her blogs are Anne Cohen and Anne Cohen Writes. She contributes to various publications including The Huffington Post, Elite Daily, and many more. She's passionate about love, writing, chess, and more than anything, her two kids.

Welcome to Anne Cohen Writes!

Anne Cohen is the founder, owner, editor, and writer at Anne Cohen Writes. She was born in Chicago, and is now based in Los Angeles, CA. She's a lifestyle & relationship blogger at Anne Cohen Writes and Anne Cohen. She's also a regular contributor on The Huffington Post, Elite Daily, Vixen Daily, and Buzzfeed. Welcome to her blog!

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