Thursday, April 14, 2005

Loudly, With A Big Stick!

Brooks babbles on. His recent column argues for a policy not invented by Teddy Roosevelt: Bolton should go at the United Nations loudly and hammer it all in with a stick. Why? Because a) the UN is in the hands of conspirators who wish to subject all of us to a world government (remember the helicopters hovering over New York City?) and b) the UN is really...slimy. Brooks "hammers" the latter argument in by using these adjectives to refer to the UN: squishier, creeping, mushy, vapid.

Brooks' vision is of a different kind of UN: hard, manly, loud and very, very pro-American. This UN would use its big stick to hit the shins of dictators everywhere that the US doesn't want to see dictators. Otherwise it would shut up and do Bush's bidding. Because that's what all right-thinking people want to happen, except for the Europeans who are in any case full of shit and not loud and sticky enough.

Here's a picture of Brooks. Print it out and put it on your wall. As a warning, perhaps.

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