Luckily, there wastons going on this week, not necessarily in the sports world but in my own small shallow existence. We are going to take time to recognize international festivals this upcoming week and the usual randomness that I'm sure you have come to expect.

One sad note, this past week was Rakhi, the Indian tradition of celebrating the relationship between brothers and sisters. It's a simple idea, the sister ties a bracelet on the brother and in exchange the brother swears to protect the sister from all harm and ill for as long as he lives ... and has to buy her a present. This year, on the day of Rakhi, I got a call from my younger sister telling me that she didn't send anything because I didn't have mailboxes set up at my new apartment complex. She was right. I didn't. Still don't. Regardless, it's sad to see traditions fail. I slept alone that night (like I've done every night of post-pubescent life) but was a little sadder than normal without my little sibling braclet around my wrist.

On to the rankings ...

20) Indian Independence Day - August 15: I could go on an elaborate reflection on the road to Indian independence, the divide between the violent and non-violent movement, British oppression but I won't. India is complicated. Instead I will share A.R. Rahman's rendition of the national anthem along with India's greatest musicians (*tears*):

19) Tennessee Titans: They have my two favorite players in the NFL: Vince Young and LenDale White. Here are their lines from Sunday night's game against the Buffalo Bills: White - 6 rushes, 12 yards, 1 TD. Young, 5 for 10, 39 yards, 1 INT. Ahhhh ... some things never change.

18) Chicago BlackHawks: "Chicago Black Hawks star Patrick Kane was charged with
attacking a cab driver in his hometown Sunday, a beating that police said was
triggered when the driver did not have 20 cents in change to give the player and
his cousin." That is hilarious. The curse of Marian Hossa continues.

17) Janamasthmi: Just to get all the Indian stuff out of the way, this upcoming weekend, Indians everywhere will also be celebrating the birth of Lord Krishna - quite possibly the most sexually explicit deity from any faith. I'm not even Hindu but I appreciate a personal savior whose accolades are centered around stealing butter and girls clothes (as they bathed) as a kid, impressing his female friends by playing the flute as an adolescent and reciting an influential text that places the onus of salvation on the individual rather than an unforeseeable force. I'm not even religious but I can roll with that philosophy.

15) Chicago White Sox: Sometimes I think baseball players have an inferiority complex because their sports lacks physicality. But not to worry - they make it up by threatening to throw a hardball 100 mph at the opposing players back. Ozzie Guillen:

"If I see someone hit my player, and I know they hit him on purpose, it's two guys going down," Guillen said. "I don't care if I get
suspended. I rather have me suspended for two games than have my players on the DL for 30 days."

Such a manly support baseball is. Did you smell that? *sniff sniff* It smells like jock - the dude we all hated in high school

14) Kentucky Basketball: Ladies and gentlemen, your number one overall pick next year:

12) Buddha Ballas: Nice article on SLAM talking about ballin' in the Himalayan Mountains with a few Buddhist monks. More than any other sport, basketball has a tendency to attract the highly academic and philosophical audience - a clear dichotomy from many of the actual players playing the game at the highest level. Nevertheless:

"Jigme pulls me aside after the game. "You can see how this game gets all people together?" he asks. "Monks, tourists, activists, journalists--the game is like that. It brings us on one common platform."

11) Detroit Pistons:Ben Wallace is back. I'm amused by his return more than excited. For the sake of his career and on-court reputation, he probably should not have left. Off the court, brotha got paid.

10) Tune of the Week:

We are taking it back a ways, a little retro per se. Quite possibly the most ridiculous concept of a song. "How could the love of my life and my potential wife be the same girl. Same girl." I don't know R. Kelly but it sounds tragic.

9) Detroit Tigers: It's weird that Curtis Granderson is trying to be the first Tiger to have a 30-30 season. I don't know what that means but I do know Barry Bonds used to do it all the time ... while sipping on horse pee to make his muscles grow - not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm completely cool with it. By the way, who is that handsome man in the dark-rimmed glasses in the Granderson link above? He looks familiar but different ... I just can't pinpoint who he is ...

8) South-Western Schools, Ohio: For not passing a levy that would have supported sports and extracurricular activities in their public schools. I understand the unmeasurable importance of sports and other activities outside of academia but at the same time, teachers are losing jobs, class sizes are increasing and the real purpose of school is being lost in favor of Friday Night Lights-style drama

Sports are great but aren't very important in the grand scheme of things. The community will slowly rally and fund sports again but for now I'm happy to see the school taking the limited resources they do have and using them on academics. America has to catch up to the rest of the world.

"A room full of educated, supposedly sensitivity-trained media professionals taking delight in McMackin's slurs. If I were him, I would have noted the laughter in the room during my apology, because if I'm going to be labeled homophobic by members of the press, I'm taking some of them down with me."

(I know this is old but I'm still catching up on stuffs. Give me a break)

5) Prison Riots: Apparently there was mass chaos at a California prison over the weekend as a race-fused riot erupted. I'm a huge fan of riots as a vehicle for social change. If nothing else, this battle royale puts the disastrous United States prison system to the limelight. Whether leaning left or right, this country has an inexplicable conservative stance on punishment - confining human beings to small cells for years - with little hope of ever incorporating them back into the real world.

Replacing the medieval system of physical punishment, modern prisons are sustained chambers of mental torture. They need to be reformed.

4) San Jose Sharks: Jeremy Roenick retired (again) this past week. He was a good player with a loud mouth and I'd say a little overrated because he was so charismatic. Reporters easily fall in love with a guy who can put three sentences together without stuttering or stopping to think. Aside from perfect wavy and curly (at the same time) hair, Roenick will always be remembered for this:

2) Washington Redskins: For being sweet. Chris Cooley's list of potential NFL fines is hilarious. My favorite: "wrong nasal strip." And I thought the NBA dress code was not cool. Another classic: "must have a doctors note for a tinted visor." I'd be screwed because I hate the sun. So bright.

1) Nike: The basketball bowling balls are classic. How do I get one those? Too cool.