TOUGH NEWS. - TOUGH NEWS. IN YOUR FACE. - '94 NO MORE. TOUGH NEWS.

Ho, Ho!! Cough, Cough!!

December 27, 1994

Santa Claus would have to pay premium prices for life insurance because of his weight and flying deliveries, said a Milwaukee insurance company. But the big guy would get a break: Northwestern Mutual Life Insurance said he wouldn't be penalized for smoking a pipe.

'I think that women, and particularly young women, have a little bit more trouble being taken seriously-being afforded the authority that you need to do this job.'

Outgoing White House Press Secretary Dee Dee Myers

Santa or Scrooge? A grumpy Santa Claus didn't give a Florida boy a present recently-instead, he gave the boy a hard time. Here's the story: Before Christmas, a 6-year-old Jacksonville, Fla., boy and his family went to see Santa at a mall. Apparently, Santa noticed that the mom was wearing a Gators shirt (that's the mascot for the University of Florida). He told the boy that he didn't like Gator fans and wasn't going to give the boy any presents. When the mom and dad said he was being rude, Santa stood up and challenged the dad to a fight. Mall security jumped in to calm things down, and Santa walked off while stunned kids waited in line. The dad later told the 6-year-old that the bad guy wasn't the real Santa. But the boy already knew the guy was bogus, because "there wasn't any magic in his eyes."

Gulp, gotta run... The grammar police are breathing down our necks! At least, it might feel that way for 7th-graders at Jackson Middle School in South Bend, Ind. A teacher "deputizes" certain kids as language police. When those kids hear anyone using incorrect grammar, they say, "Language alert," and the offender receives a citation. The teacher who came up with the idea was sick of students using improper language. Some students say that once they get into correcting people's grammar, they even do it at home and around their friends. (Hmmm, just a little annoying?)

What a wish! You've heard of the Make-A-Wish Foundation, right? It grants wishes to kids who are dying. Kids have gotten stuff like a Caribbean cruise, a trip to Disneyland, or meetings with their favorite stars. Recently, 16-year-old April Fleming of Seattle, who has a life-threatening blood disorder, asked for something a little less exotic: Gifts for homeless kids. So the foundation wrapped up toys and clothes and gave them to children at an area shelter. The whole thing was videotaped, and April got the tape. The children were giddy with surprise and happiness, and April cried as she watched the tape in her Seattle hospital room.

Throw away the key: Jurors in Oklahoma City wanted to make sure a man who raped a 3-year-old girl could never do such a horrible thing again. So recently they recommended that the rapist get a life sentence plus more than 29,950 years. The judge agreed with the jury and gave him six consecutive life sentences. Juror Laura Bixler said, "By God, we can send a message to the offender that we are not going to tolerate" his crime.

Place to pray: With all the debate over school prayer, a Portland, Maine, high school made an interesting move recently: It set up a temporary prayer room for Muslim students. The deal is, Portland High School has had to relocate students to another high school until safety problems at its own building are fixed. To make room for the extra students, afternoon and evening classes were scheduled - and that gets in the way of the Muslim students' prayers at sunset. So until life gets back to normal, the kids can go to a small office for their prayers. The state's Civil Liberties Union was fine with the decision, comparing it to when Jewish kids get to be absent on certain holy days and when schools close for Christmas. The Maine Christian Civic League liked the decision, too, but said Christian kids should be allowed to use empty classrooms for prayer sessions.

TARGET: WHITE HOUSE?

The White House has always been a major tourist attraction, but recently it's attracted more than tourists. It has been the site of three unrelated shootings in two months. The most recent occurred last Tuesday when police fired several shots at a man approaching them with a knife outside the White House. Police say they shot the man when he ignored police orders to halt (the attacker died later at the hospital).

Just a week earlier on Dec. 17, shots were fired at the White House around 2 a.m. The Clintons, who were asleep at the time, were unharmed. The Secret Service, which is in charge of protecting the president, thought the shots were fired from a car driving by. One bullet hit the White House; two were found on the grounds.

The first shooting occurred on Oct. 29, when a man pulled a semi-automatic weapon from his overcoat and fired 29 rounds of ammo at the White House. Although several bullets hit the building-one bullet shattered a window in the press room-no one was injured.

White House Chief of Staff Leon Panetta blamed the shootings on increasing violence in general: "We are living at a time when these incidents of violence take place not just in cities and communities around the country, but take place in Washington in front of the White House."