It soothed her when at times I couldn’t, and keep her pretty much content. But now, I look at the binkie with slight amusement and much despise. Just like another good ‘ol habit, I want to step on it, burn it and kick it to the curb. Sometimes I find myself asking, who invented the binkie and did they have children?

The binkie should come with a warning label.

This product can be addictive. Withdrawal can cause major distress to the user and the parent. Addiction can cause all parties involved sleepless nights, temper tantrums and crying fits. Please use with extreme caution.

My son never sucked his thumb or used a binkie.

To my daughter on the other hand, the binkie is her security blanket, in all situations. It was attached to her lip like a growth, a cute one, but a growth.

Although it doesn’t feel like it upon withdrawal, I am sure benefits outweigh the risks, increased brain function and reduced risk of SIDS seem like a far cry when your child wants the binkie, you can’t find one in your purse and find yourself sweating as you dart to the nearest baby aisle to calm the latest public display of “binkie attachment”.

Not only should the binkie come with a warning label, it should come with a withdrawal manual: Tips to successfully “detatch” the binkie from you toddler, physically and mentally. I’ve heard tips that range from going “cold turkey” , burning the tips off, to dipping the tips in coffee (which seems like a disaster waiting to happen).

I tried the cold turkey trick and only lasted about 5 hours because the entire 5 hours, my daughter cried for her binkie. So I went for a slightly more gradual approach, after all, my daughter is persistent, demanding and not one to fall to any old cheap trick. I cut off the tips to the binkies and laid them on the floor in her “usual” spots. As she spotted the binkie, she excitedly made her way to the binkie and as fast as she put it in her mouth, she took it out in disgust.

“Broken” she proclaimed, and dropped it on the floor.

A bit confused she looked at it for a while and walked away. I approached her with the binkie (the broken binkie) and she turned her shoulder to me and walked away. I said, “It’s broken. Should we put it in the trash?” And she nodded her head. As we said bye bye to the binkie.

It has only been one day and I do let her keep one in her crib to use in her crib only. I’m all for not using the binkie during the day, but I wasn’t ready to give up a couple sleepless nights. Not quite yet.

Like I said a couple days ago, we are trying for a third and I wonder if I will find myself at wits about whether or not to give my newborn the binkie. Afterall, binkies now come personalized, in fashionable colors and blinged out.

This morning, while my kids where watching their usual PBS shows, I announced that I needed to take a shower. My son startled me at what he said next.

“I need to take a shower. I’m all dirty and stinky.” I said. (I had just done my usual morning workout)

My son looked at me and explained, “You do need to take a shower. I like my color, not yours,” as he pointed to his cheek.

I hesitated, not knowing what to say next.

“What do you mean?”, I asked. ” You don’t like my skin color?”

“I like Sophia’s white shirt.” He explained. That should have been key enough that he didn’t mean what he said, or what I thought he meant.

Probing. “You don’t like me skin color?” I asked again, trying to get into the head of my 3 1/2 year old son, an impossible task itself.

“No, I like your skin color.” he said.

I don’t know why, but I was close to tears.

I called my dad.

“George is 3. He has no idea what he is saying. If he was 10, then you discuss it, but he is 3. You told him you were dirty and stinky. He probably relates it to when he is in the dirt and you tell him he is dirty and stinky and needs to take a shower.”

I know this is probably true.

But still.

I don’t know if I am ready to talk about race stuff or if I am ready to handle it. I know it’s not now, but it will be some day. What if your child, who now looks at you with such unconditional love, all of a sudden has questions to why mommy is “different”?

My dad, who is part Caucasian and part African-American, insists that even though your kids probably will ask questions, they will always love you because you are there parents.

And I guess that’s true. I remember being called an Oreo Cookie (kids can be mean) at school but it never made me not like my parents for being one race or the other, it made me not like the kids calling me names.

So I guess all I can do is tell my kids that there are many different types of people in the world and being one way or another doesn’t make you better, it just makes you different. And differences are what make our world what it is today. People are different sizes, shapes, races, religions, and so much more.

Besides without all these different people we wouldn’t have Sesame Street, Spongebob (a sponge) wouldn’t live in the Ocean with a squirrel and a star fish and Bob the Builder wouldn’t be good friends with Scoop, Muck or Dizzy.

What do you do when your son is dry for 3 hours and then starts playing with his favorite toy and refuses and fights to get up to go to the potty? Do you drag him to the potty with every little bit of your potty training desperation ? Or do you let him wait it out and “wet” it out,over and over again?

Is this all just part of the training process for him….and for me?

Maybe my desire for him to potty train is not as strong as his desire to be “trained”?

Or maybe that’s the problem.

What do you do when the potty becomes you and your child’s worst nightmare?

Look for answers on your blog ? Or maybe a sign from the Porcelain King?

My son maybe a potty training late bloomer.

He is completely resistant to all attempts at potty training so now my plan is to let him be and let him go when he wants to go. I don’t know what else to do.

I thought he was ready, he stayed dry for long periods of time, asked to go on the potty, etc, etc, and then it all stopped. I thought maybe it was the whole pull-up action. Because it is really like just wearing a diaper. It allows you to get wet and for as long as you want to, stay wet. You can go in a pull-up and I think, or at least I thought that was the problem. So, I tried just letting him run around bare naked, but that didn’t work, George peed and pooped on the floor, and then played in it.

Then I tried underwear but and he stayed dry and was successful that is until he got busy playing. I even set a timer and told him to try and go every hour, but once he began playing with his trains, there was no stopping him. I would literally have to drag him in kicking and screaming.

Thomas, Percy and the gang ruled over peeing in the potty any day.

So I am at a loss, I have no idea what to do. Maybe it is just the fact that he is not ready yet. My sister-in-law, whose 3 1/2 year old son just became potty trained about a week or 2 ago, agrees that George isn’t ready and insists that I wait until he is 3 1/2 and something will just click and he’ll want to go on the potty.

I hope it, no let me rephrase, I wish would be that easy.

Well, so that gives me 5 weeks and counting. I know every kid is different and they all develop at different rates, but quite frankly I’m not buying it.

What if my son happens to be lazy at potty training and his smarts have outwitted my attempts when it comes to the P-O-T-T-Y?

It’s not that fact that George doesn’t want to go on the potty. When there is nothing else to do, like at night when he doesn’t want to go to bed, or in public when he wants to see the new potty, or well…just because, he’ll stay completely dry, number one and 2. But for the most part during the day, nothing. I tried rewards and he was great. But when he didn’t want the rewards anymore he stopped going on the potty. I hope someone has some great advice, all you potty training experts out there.

My husband always reminds me that I should expect my son to be a little late jumping on the potty training bandwagon because he was also a stubborn one. When my husband was 4 years-old my mother-in-law wondered why she hadn’t seen him go number one or number 2 for a good amount of time and then she realized he was going behind that garage with the dog.

It has been a while since I have written in my blog. Between moving, getting settled and taking care of my sister’s 2 month old daughter-long story, my time has been pretty much occupied. But now that things are getting settled, I have lots of stories to tell, adventures to share and hopefully you’ll join me again for this crazy fast moving roller coaster we call motherhood. Anyway, until my next post which will be tonight, here is something I thought you might enjoy to check out from Cool Mom Picks, one of my favorite websites to check out for just about everything having to do with babies, toddlers, mothers and everything in between. With school right around the corner, they have posted their own Back to School guide, consisting of their favorite picks to get you and your little one ready for that first day of school. Check it out.

Mother’s Day is steadily approaching and what a better way to show mom you are truly thinking about her, of course other than breakfast in bed, a spa treatment and something with a big and sparkley jewel, just kidding, is to take her out and about. I know I would love any of these (hint,hint) and there is still time left to plan her special day. So, here are some great things happening around town that you may want to take your mom to, maybe I’ll see you at one of them.

1. Longwood Gardens is celebrating mother’s day with special musical events throughout the weekend to make your mother’s day unforgettable. If you can’t go Sunday, go Saturday or make it a weekend trip. On Saturday participate in the Bird watching tour and then end the day with a special swing concert from the John Clark Big Band. On Sunday enjoy the beautiful chimes of the Harp Music by Janet Witman, followed by a Carillon Concert featuring Dough Gefvert topped off by a Chimes Tower Tour. Events are throughout the entire weekend from 9:00am to 6:00pm. Check out their website for more information.

2. Why not give your mom the presidential treatment with brunch at the National Constitution Center! Enjoy a hot breakfast with made to order omelets, a carving station, a pasta station, salad bar and desert bar. Tickets include brunch, admission to the museum and a special gift for mom. Reservations are required to hop on over to their website to check it out.

3. This one sounds like fun…Treat Mom to a lovely Teddy Bear Tea party at the Garden State Discovery Museum. Featuring teddy bear songs, stories, cookie decorating and crafts. To top it off, Moms are free on Mother’s Day!! The tea party runs Sunday from 1pm to 3pm.

4. Celebrate your Mom and Moms of all species at the Academy of Natural Sciences Animal Moms Weekend this Saturday and Sunday from 11:00am to 3:30pm. Bring your little ones and learn about the nurturing residents of the museum’s Live Animal Center. Home to 100 animals that are injured and cannot survive the wild. Complete with a Live animal show, Learn about a variety of animal eggs, and make a Mother’s Day Card to take home.

5. Maybe you want to give your Mom a break on Mother’s Day and give here a couple hours to go to the Spa, go shopping or just take a nap. Bounce U in Cherry Hill is helping you achieve a little quiet in the house by letting your kids cause a ruckus at their’s. Sunday from 12:00pm to 2:30pm join Bounce U for a laser light afternoon of fun with plenty of bouncing.

Whatever you do on Mother’s Day, and trust me, it doesn’t have to be a lot or cost a lot , just take some time ton show your mom how special she is to you.

Live in or visiting the South Jersey/Philadelphia Area?
Looking for fun things to do with the kids this weekend!
Don't forget to join me for Fun Fridays and I'll let you know
what's happening around town.