All About Strap Ons & Harness

Strap-On sex is often considered something extreme, rather dark and perhaps more domination-oriented than what the average person might be interested to explore, but for gay and straight couples it is becoming one of the more popular items purchased at the Sugarhouse Blue Boutique. A less-talked about kind of person who can also benefit from this kind of device is the man with erectile dysfunctions, perhaps from a prostate surgery, who no longer can achieve an erection firm enough or long enough for intercourse.

So… what’s so great about it? For Straight Couples:

The most obvious benefit from using a strap-on as a straight couple is the stimulation of the male prostate gland, which has numerous health benefits that are still being researched. Many doctors believe there are heath conditions that prostate stimulation can benefit that haven’t been discovered yet. The basic principle is, prostate stimulation enhances blood flow in the pelvic area, bringing new oxygen and nutrients to tissues, helping those tissues release built-up toxins. This in turn can improve erectile dysfunction, relieve any pain or swelling in the area, and prevent future complications for the prostate and related systems.

The benefit for women is that they have a different way to connect with their partner, and can have clitoral orgasms while using the strap-on. Use of a strap-on can also be excellent foreplay for both partners. It is also a way to use a toy together, without the toy being much of a third party; both man and woman are using all of their bodies and experiencing the toy together.

So… what’s so great about it? For the ED Man:

For men with severe erectile dysfunction, the strap-on can restore much of a depleted sex life. There are many hollow strap-ons with different sized, so that the man can be four inches up to 11 inches!! Vibrating models give extra stimulation to both partners. All hollow strap-ons can be used by men or women, so she can use it on him as well.

So… what’s so great about it? For the Lesbian Couple:

The benefits here are pretty obvious: introducing a strap-on in the relationship can add an entire new aspect to orgasms. And if internal toys have already been introduced, then a strap-on is a great way to make their use more intimate. The greatest thing about the use of a strap-on for lesbian couples is the closeness it can create between partners, and g-spot stimulation. For the partner that wears it, a clitoral vibrating strap-on can be just as stimulation for her as the partner she is using it on. And with internally worn strap-on dildos, you can have an experience without any straps of any kind, sharing the toy together.

What to look for in a strap-on device:

When shopping for a strap-on, it can be pretty overwhelming. Sex toy shopping is already pretty harrowing without the added challenge of all the parts there are to consider with a strap-on system. Luckily, when I bought mine I was in a sex toy shop in Logan, so I only had one choice. If you come into one of our locations, we have a lot of different brands to choose from. While I’m definitely biased toward what brands are better, you can still find a good strap-on, if you know what to look for.

-Clitoral vibration vs. plain: Some strap-ons come with a clitoral vibrator to stimulate the woman wearing it while she penetrates the other person. Most of them are just a cheap watch battery bullet, but the pocket lets you replace it if you have a better one at home. Brands to look for: Tantus, Sportsheets

-Internally worn vs. externally worn: Some models, such as the Feeldoe, are totally strap-free, allowing both partners to simply share the toy without restraint. These models come with a vibration option, the basic watch battery bullet that is interchangeable. The downside to these toys is you have to invest in an entire new piece if you want a different size, and if you aren’t shaped correctly or internally tight enough, the toy may fall out and you may have to hold it in place.

-The toys that come with your system of choice: Many systems come with toys made out of unhygienic materials, low grade plastics that can ooze oils and chemicals which then irritate the users. even if this toy doesn’t produce irritation for you, it will leave pores where chemicals and oils have become unbonded from the plastic, leaving space for bacteria to grow and eventually cracking apart. Silicone is the most hygenic and long-lasting plastic that does not unbond. you can however, replace the toys that come with your system in most cases, which brings us to the next point;

-Interchangeable toys: I am of the persuasion that interchangeability is one of the best features to have in a strap-on system. Because you never know if you will want a smaller or larger toy, or one that vibrates, or one that is softer/firmer later on down the road. Most systems that are worth their price will have removable o-rings whereby you can use any toy with a base to them. The only brand that is only compatible with its own toys is the Vac-U-Lock system by Doc Johnson; which I do not recommend for this reason and also, that the backs of their strap-ons are hard plastic and screws. They do however have the most options in realistic looking dildos to go with them. Recommended brands for interchangeable parts: Sportsheets, KinkLab, and Tantus

-The straps themselves: Always keep in mind that while all straps are adjustable, the material they are made of needs to be comfortable, and having features such as velvet, fleece, or soft nylon, will add to the comfort of wearing the strap-on. Also remember that thong style strap-ons can make it harder for your partner to access your genitalia, or can be uncomfortable. Most strap-ons are harness style, wrapping around the legs, instead of between them.

-The Menage-a-Trois: Finally, there are strap-ons that a man can wear in order to give a female double penetration. Most will have a cock ring for him to go through attached to the harness, which has an interchangeable ring for an added dildo that sits above the penis. These aren’t as numerous, but I’ve found the Sportsheets Menage-a-trois model is the highest quality.

Stap-ons are a fantastic addition to your toy box as they are one of the most dynamic pieces you can own, and can be used to give pleasure to just about anyone. And with the right knowledge, you are sure to find one to fit your lifestyle and your comfort zone. And best of all, they’re good for you, like most sexual stimulation, but even more so for men. And no, if you enjoy prostate massage, it does not mean you are gay. We hear that question all the time! Liking one part of your body stimulated just means you enjoy pleasure and the many health benefits from it!