For three consecutive rounds we have called for the Canucks to lose their serieses. For three consecutive rounds we have been disappointed. We have now upped the ante and had a buddy in Vegas place a cool $10 beans on every team in the Conference Finals to win save the Canucks. Money talks Nation and our money says "anyone but Vancouver."

HEAVEN HELP US ALL

The most recent rapture may have passed us by with little end-of-days-type-activity but the one sign of the apocalypse we can't shake is the fact that the Canucks are still cruising along in these here playoffs. Watching the Sedins and Luongo celebrating an overtime series win dang near made our eyes cry tears of battery acid last night.

They are now officially running on all cylinders Chez Canucks. The twins are scoring left and right, Luongo is kicking out the old pads turning away the rubber scoring discs like crazy. Kesler is hating everyone and smashing everything. It is everything we didn't want to see, happening before our very tear filled eyes.

Oh the injustice of it all. The fairweather fans in Vancouver will now jack the price of tickets straight through the roof. Brand new Canucks jerseys will fly off the shelves at Sport Cheks everywhere and people all around the Country will suddenly remember "they ARE huge Canucks fans and have been all along! Didn't you know?"

Our stupid brother is living la vida loca out in Vancouver. He called us last night in complete and utter joy. "Seems the Canucks are four away from a Cup win. Care to place a wager on things?" Not only did we take him up on his ill advised bet but we cursed him as only a fan of the Oilers could.

"We will bet you a few clams that the Canucks lose. But for an extra element of difficulty we want odds that you suffer the same fate as have the Oilers and the Flames. Push the series to a seventh game then gas it in the final match. I place a second bet that the Canucks lose in 7 and break all your BC Bud loving hearts."

And so it was written and so it was done. Damn you Canucks. Damn you straight to Game Seven Hell.

Can you imagine living in BC, having a store decked out in OILERS gear, and the Nucks keep winning....The only good thing is, it's good for business....Because they keep coming in to rub my face in it! I didn't think it was possible to hate a team this much, but I hate the Nucks, and can't wait to watch ROLI hoist the cup, and say "this one is for the OILERS FANS"

It pains me to see the Nucks winning when all three times easily could have beaten Vancouver.. I still say had the Blackhawks shown up for any of the first three games we would not be having this conversation...

What really pisses me off is that the Canucks got their tying goal because of yet again crap-assed officiating in supposedly the best league in the world.. how do four bushleague officials miss that puck hitting Sedin on the clear by Boyle.. it's not like it was just barely.. the puck clearly changed directions and none of them could see that? A peewee ref could have caught that....

Dinks indeed...

Luongo may be playing well.. Thomas is playing better.. and the Bruins will end their series tonight.. I just hope they don't do something dumb like wait for a week to start the Cup.. seriously.. this playing hockey till June is stupid.. bring it back like the Oilers cups of the 80's where you are watching the team sip by the May long weekend.. not June 8th...

Yeah, I have to say that I hope Lucic cranks up his mean streak and just levels Kesler in game 1. The Bruins will be by far the most physical team to play the Nucks, that hopefully doesn't bode well for them. They are already battered and now we have to hope that the Bruins just beat them like the Canucks owe them money.

Ugh, they even have all of their core players locked up until eternity. I bet they're pretty smug over there, what with their ocean and their ski mountains. Even when they lose they'll think they have a clever reason why "next year" might actually be the year, and why it doesn't matter because a hackey sack and joint are a great way to pass the time on Kits beach.

Which is what makes their eventual comeuppance so much more delightful. I mean, these aren't the Toronto Maple Leafs whose wet dream is just to make the playoffs. I've felt since the beginning of the season that the Canucks would come close, but Luongo is bound to lay a few eggs just to give Canuck fans a Bill Buckner-like scapegoat to pin their failing on.

You wait and see. I'm calling it! And unlike The Raptor*, I will be right.

* What kind of prediction is the realization of Jurassic Park anyway? Puh-leeease!

Okay here is a story for you guys if you care to keep reading.....During the regular season with like 25 games left I was on my European sports betting site (betsson.com), I saw one bet for Vancouver to win the Western Conference (figuring it was for the regular season), so I took the bet for 40 euros...after the bet was in, I found out that it was for the Clarence S. Campbell trophy afterwards, sadly I won the money and will be donating all the 130 euros I won to Gregor's MS charity....because I have absolutely no use for any money I win with Vancouver winning the western conference. GO BRUINS GO!!!

The worst thing to ever happen is the Boston-TB series going beyond tonight. I appreciate you Oiler fans love Roli but they will not beat the Canucks and will likely lose to them in 5 or fewer games. Add to that both teams would be more tired after playing another 2 games. Boston needs to win because they will destroy them physically.

Kesler will down play it but he is injured and ripe for punishment. They are down two key defenders and Bieksa got leveled last night. They are hurting and Boston will destroy them physically.

I have just become the biggest Boston fan. Really that is because those c*cksuckers out West had the easiest cake walk to the finals I have ever seen. SJS played like total sh*t, Nashville had no business being there, and Chicago didn't try until the final 4 games.

I am so mad about these Canucks that I am almost sick of hockey as a sport. Any sport where a bunch of whiney panzies like that can win it all is not worth living.
~goes back to looking at the Oilers prospects depth chart~

Whereas the "Calgary Playoff Jersey" is rarely seen and even then only for fleetingly short periods of time.

But... doesn't that make the Oilers playoff jersey extinct?

It was killed off by poachers long ago. LA, New York, Pittsburgh were all culprits. As well as evil scavengers known as Pocklington and more recently, the scouting staff of the early 2000's and KLowe.

It was believed that the Oilers playoff jersey was making a comeback, in the late '90s, and mid 2000's, but those were just false sightings much like those of the Ivory-Billed Woodpecker.

Local flora and fauna still seem to feed off of the remains of any playoff jersey scattered around, and there is HOPE that the Oilers playoff jersey is just hiding underground, away from natural enemies such as Predators, Coyotes, Ducks, and big Stupid Whales that have nothing to do with being Canadian, or Canuck.

We hold out hope, little Oilers playoff jersey. Be strong, come back to us.

I am so mad about these Canucks that I am almost sick of hockey as a sport. Any sport where a bunch of whiney panzies like that can win it all is not worth living.
~goes back to looking at the Oilers prospects depth chart~

If they win the cup, this might actually shake a lot of my interest in the sport altogether too.

The trick is to reward yourself with something nice...something that you wouldn't normally get, or do...maybe something you've always wanted but can't really afford:

Promise yourself you'll get or do that but only if the Canucks win. I'm thinking I'll get a quad. I'll just shut off the TV and buy a quad. When the nausea hits: I'll ball up my rage, and hit the trails. The only draw back to my plan is that I'll probably die alone on a trail tapped under a couple thousand pounds of flipped steel still cursing Vancouver with my last breath.

Jeanshorts: you should probably just get a very aggressive lap dance in Vegas.

One has to respect a article like this that points out the great work of the Canucks yet still thinks they will blow it,and i will respect this writer even more when Henrik raises Lords Stanley Cup and once and for all shuts people like this up .There is only one more thing after this happens that makes me wonder how many of these Canuck haters will still not give credit were credit is due,it will be kinda like now as people taken in by the 2012 scam but are still in denial that they really have no point in what they have said, and i will have a nice pot of crow stew for all of you who have the balls to stand up and admit you were wrong and Canucks rule as the best team in the NHL.

Keep the negativity coming hockey fans of losing teams. Kesler takes that negative energy, swallows it down and turns it into body checks and goals. Luongo takes it and shoves it in his pads to make them bigger and block more shots. The Sedin twins and Burrows... well they don't understand English very well so they don't even know about your bitterness. They haven't had time to learn it what with all the perfect passes and sweet goal scoring they've been doing. Bieksa... well you're lucky he's so busy captalizing on bad bounces or he might come to your house and eat your babies.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go plan a parade route. GO CANUCKS GO! BELIEVE IN BLUE! KES WE CAN! IN LU WE TRUST! BIEK-CELLENT! WIN DA TURD & DA CUP!

One has to respect a article like this that points out the great work of the Canucks yet still thinks they will blow it,and i will respect this writer even more when Henrik raises Lords Stanley Cup and once and for all shuts people like this up .There is only one more thing after this happens that makes me wonder how many of these Canuck haters will still not give credit were credit is due,it will be kinda like now as people taken in by the 2012 scam but are still in denial that they really have no point in what they have said, and i will have a nice pot of crow stew for all of you who have the balls to stand up and admit you were wrong and Canucks rule as the best team in the NHL.

Dude go back to your Wizards n Warcraft games, until your cheapp ass dirty $hit of a team actually wins something then talk

Keep the negativity coming hockey fans of losing teams. Kesler takes that negative energy, swallows it down and turns it into body checks and goals. Luongo takes it and shoves it in his pads to make them bigger and block more shots. The Sedin twins and Burrows... well they don't understand English very well so they don't even know about your bitterness. They haven't had time to learn it what with all the perfect passes and sweet goal scoring they've been doing. Bieksa... well you're lucky he's so busy captalizing on bad bounces or he might come to your house and eat your babies.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go plan a parade route. GO CANUCKS GO! BELIEVE IN BLUE! KES WE CAN! IN LU WE TRUST! BIEK-CELLENT! WIN DA TURD & DA CUP!

Meh.. even if they do win... I think you should remember this...

Your team won't ever win 4 in 5 years, 5 in 7 years, be considered a dynasty, etc etc etc...

3 cup appearances in 40 years.. whoopee.. we have 7 in 33...

Should I keep the math going? This was the Canucks what.. 3 conference final in their 40 years as well.. I think we've had three of those in a row, multiple occassions...

Please.. nothing worse than chump Canuck fans who think their team is so damn hot when they have NEVER won anything worth anything of value... shooting off confetti over a West Conf championship.. oh.. because that's such a big accomplishment..

Seriously, when your team actually does something big and wins it.. multiple times.. and has dynasty tattooed on their asses come talk to us.. until then.. they are nothing but a bunch of chucklehead wannabees who would not know when to really win "THE BIG GAME" if it hit them right between the eyes...