Five Crazy Headlines:

Bring a gun for self defense, accidentally shoot someone instead

Maybe he should have waited and rented the movie instead.

Last week in Renton, Washington, 29-year-old Dane Gallion went to the movie theater to watch an evening showing of “13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi.” Gallion was worried about the potential of a mass shooting occurring at the theater, so he brought a handgun with him into the theater.

Police say that Gallion was fidgeting in his seat according to witnesses, and 15 minutes into the movie, he accidentally shot a woman sitting in the row in front of him.

Gallion left the theater after the gun was fired, allegedly dumping the gun’s magazine into a trash can as he left, but he later turned himself in to police after his father called 911 on him.

The woman suffered a broken collarbone from the shot and was taken to a hospital. Gallion was arrested and charged with third-degree assault.

Coyotes are taking a trip in Northern California

After ruling out rabies as the cause of a series of unusual incidents involving coyotes, wildlife officials in Northern California are beginning to suspect something more psychedelic as the culprit.

Officials are saying the incidents—in which coyotes are running into the highway during the middle of the night, staring down cars and then sniffing around them once they have stopped—could be caused by coyotes having ingested hallucinogenic mushrooms.

The fly agaric mushroom has hallucinogenic properties and is present in the area where the incidents have occurred. Officials have offered the “shrooms” explanation as one of several explanations for the incidents.

School closed due to instrument of mass polka

An accordion in a band room at Walnut Middle School in Grand Island, Nebraska, prompted a school-wide evacuation last week.

A staff member at the school noticed a box sitting in the band room that he had never seen before and said it didn’t look like it held any kind of band instrument. The school safety officer was notified about the box, and it was decided that an evacuation of the school as a precaution was the best course of action.

State police came in and cleared the package, which was later determined to be an accordion inside of a case.

It is not yet known who is the owner of the accordion, whether it’s a student’s or a school-district-owned instrument.

By introducing a resolution to the Utah State Legislature, Utah state senator Todd Weiler is seeking to fight a major public health issue affecting the state—porn.

Weiler filed Senate Concurrent Resolution 9 last week before the Utah State Senate, in which he declared that pornography is creating a “public health crisis.”

The resolution asks that the legislature and the Governor implement changes at the, “community and societal level,” to address the, “pornography epidemic that is harming the people of our state and nation.”

Vulture returned to Israel after being cleared of espionage

After coordination with the United Nations, a vulture being held by Lebanon was cleared of spying charges and returned to Israel last week.

The bird was captured on Tuesday by Lebanese villagers who were suspicious of a tracking device on its tail. The vulture was from an Israeli game reserve that had been working on a project to reintroduce raptors into the Middle East.

A United Nations liaison unit worked with Lebanon and Israel to resolve the incident, and the villagers eventually released the vulture after they were convinced it wasn’t a spy.