Saturday, January 29, 2011

All Things Being Equal....I'll BE a Queen

I grew up in the time of Women's Rights and the ERA (Equal Rights Amendment). Troubling times for sure. Women were declaring their value by burning their bras in the city streets. Marching en mass while carrying banners and shouting witty slogans that I was too young to pay much attention to. Their concerns were not trivial but their actions many times were. These women bristled at the thought of a man opening the door for them, helping them carry heavy bags, and pulling dining chairs out for them in restaurants. Heaven help the fool that offered to help with a ladies coat! Submitting to these gentlemanly acts of affirmation was perceived as an affront to any woman who had suffered under the hands of some Neanderthal that had existed somewhere, anywhere, at any time.

Even as a child I thought this type of reaction to civility was nonsense. Who doesn't want help when the bags are heavy?? Likewise, if I have to burn my bra to convince you that I am worthy of consideration I have probably wasted a very useful piece of lingerie. I have also negated any serious discussion with men because.....hello?!?.....they don't wear bras and are perfectly okay with women NOT wearing them. (Not really sure who's brainchild that "shocking" bit of frippery was.........must have been a confused queen!! lol)

One thing that I do remember about those interesting times is the word EQUAL. As in "Equal Work for Equal Pay". This certainly was an inequity that needed to be addressed. Score one for the girls and thanks for the equal wages!

My post today is to address the second sentiment, EQUALITY, that was plastered across every newspaper and magazine in the country. When I think of women being equal to men this is what pops up in my mind --

WOMEN = MEN

﻿We were being taught in school to see that both sides of the equal sign were the same. Unfortunately women around this great land embraced the notion that they were and should want to be the same as a man. Maybe that's what all the bra burning was about..................... They demanded liberation that gave them the "freedom" to dress in men's clothes, yank their hair back in unflattering ways or chop it off all together, shunned beauty products, basic feminine hygiene and placed their sweet feet in cast off army boots so no one would be confused about how much of a woman they really were under all this neglect. Even as I type this it makes me laugh at how absurd it all was. I just want to stand up and shout "Ladies how does it make good sense to pretend to be what you are NOT, while denying what you undoubtedly ARE?" Queens should certainly be free to dress as the occasion requires or as she desires but are you really free if you think you must look like a man to be heard?

Eagles and horses are both iconic images of power and grace. One soars having keen eyesight and views the world from heights most of us will never experience. Another uses it's tremendous strength for speed and pulling heavy loads. Their physical grace, power and beauty have been the study of artists throughout the ages. Neither is jealous of the strengths they don't possess. They do what THEY do best. Eagles don't strive to pull heavy loads or befriend men. Horses give no thought to why they can't fly.

THE QUEEN MUM'S PEARL OF THE DAY

BE QUEENLY (not Kingly)

"DON'T WASTE TIME TRYING TO BE WHAT YOU ARE NOT. BE THE BEST "YOU" THAT YOU CAN BE."

True Queens realize that they are certainly not "one of the boys". Queens have insights, skills and power that are not natural to a man. (Not to slight the menfolk, mind you.) Maybe it's a tad "old school" to think this but I see that Queens have the ability to be respected for who they are. Respect your own queenness. Queens should likewise learn to respect the marvelous ways that men are men. When you must interact with a man by all means don't come screaming at him with a burning bra in your hands. See how silly that image is? You probably laughed just now didn't you? Dig into your arsenal of feminine insights, wrap it in respect, put your emotional overdrive on pause and NEVER set aside your Queen to be what you are not. Being a Queen is NOT about his reaction! It is about YOUR reaction and how you conduct yourself.

Educate yourself on being the best Queen you can possibly be. Read books that are helpful. Observe. Ask questions. Think things thru. We have such liberty today! Our foremothers would have a hard time understanding all that we are free to pursue. Don't waste the gift of your femininity by setting it aside to be one of the guys. It's just as ridiculous as burning your bra or asking a horse to fly!

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About Me

I'm Marcia, The Queen Mum. I've been ruling with HMS (His Manly Self) for well over 25 years. The kingdom is currently home to five royal heirs (four beautiful daughters and one superb son) and one supremely large Labrador who also serves as the security guard and official gate greeter of our castle located in Oklahoma, USA.
After many many years on my throne, I have learned some pretty impressive things. The chiefmost item being-Never let a little castle clutter keep you from putting on your favorite tiara. And, when in doubt, just make a creative mess! You'll feel better, I promise.