Top 10 List – Family Matters Bloghttp://familymatters.net/blog
building grace based relationshipsWed, 23 Nov 2016 21:44:17 +0000en-UShourly1https://wordpress.org/?v=4.6.133344183Top 10 Ways to be a Great Friend (for your Kids)http://familymatters.net/blog/2015/07/28/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-friend-for-your-kids/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2015/07/28/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-friend-for-your-kids/#respondTue, 28 Jul 2015 12:30:45 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=1631We’re back with another Top 10 List from Raising Kids for True Greatness. If you’ve missed our previous Top 10 posts be sure to go back and read Top 10 Ways to be a Great Classmate, Top 10 Ways to be a Great Neighbor, Top 10 Ways to Help your Kids Get the Most out of Organized Sports, Top […]]]>

Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Friend (For your Kids)

1. Never disparage your friends’ parents. No matter how much your friends are struggling, always encourage them to do their best to love and respect their mom and dad.

2. Don’t tease your friends regarding things they are sensitive about (their looks, their weight, their intellect, their family, etc).

3. Never let them talk you into doing wrong or having fun at someone else’s expense. Rise above this. You’ll be a much better friend to them if you do.

4. Don’t smother them, and don’t let them smother you. Friends give each other plenty of space. Encourage them to spend time with their families and other friends.

5. Be trustworthy with private information they share with you. Never use their vulnerability against them.

6. Encourage them when they’re down, and applaud them when they’ve put forth a good effort (in sports, in academics, in relationships, etc).

7. Make it your aim to help your friends become better people in all areas of their lives (physically, emotionally, intellectually, morally, spiritually, and in regard to their talents).

8. Be loyal and faithful to your friends should they fall out of favor with the popular crowd or happen to be struggling through a difficult time in their lives (drugs, alcohol, rebellion against their parents, rejection of academic responsibilities, etc).

9. Be a “fun” friend to be around. Let your hair down. Don’t be a “stick in the mud.” Enjoy your times together.

10. Pray for your friends. Ask God to use you to build them up and help them feel better about themselves.

Any other suggestions? We’d love to hear from YOU.

{Originally published in 2011}

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2015/07/28/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-friend-for-your-kids/feed/01631Top 10 Ways to Connect with your Kids’ Hearthttp://familymatters.net/blog/2015/02/19/top-10-ways-to-connect-with-your-kids-heart/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2015/02/19/top-10-ways-to-connect-with-your-kids-heart/#commentsThu, 19 Feb 2015 12:30:34 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=1294 CREATE A JOURNAL: Team Sprad loves to journal! I encourage all parents to purchase a journal for each of their kiddos and create a habit of writing in the journal on a weekly basis. I write about the gifts I see in them, encourage them, tell them I am sorry, let my boys know […]]]>

CREATE A JOURNAL: Team Sprad loves to journal! I encourage all parents to purchase a journal for each of their kiddos and create a habit of writing in the journal on a weekly basis. I write about the gifts I see in them, encourage them, tell them I am sorry, let my boys know how courageous they are, how beautiful my daughter is, share God’s word and lay it on their bed so they can read it before they fall asleep. Sometimes, I even get the journal back with notes they have written to me.

ASK FORGIVENESS: All parents wound their kids’ hearts but very few parents acknowledge the offense and sincerely ask their kids to forgive them. I love the message it sends when a parents get’s eye level, holds their kid’s hands, acknowledges the hurt and authentically asks for forgiveness.

GIVE GRACE: Recently my son blew it big time! He was nervous about what dad might say or do. I simply hugged him, didn’t even talk discipline and let him know there is nothing he could ever do to make me love him more or less! He deserved consequences…but this time I simply gave grace. He was shocked!

SERVE: Blow your kids away by randomly serving them without any strings attached. Help them clean their room, take out the trash for them, prepare their favorite meal, ask them if they’d like to have 6 friends stay the night! Maybe not…you’ll have to think about that one. You could even buy them their favorite Def Leppard album! (JK)…showing my age on that one.

BE HONEST ABOUT FAMILY BAGGAGE: I come from a family that can get their “mad on” quickly and make everyone around them walk on egg shells. I personally have struggled with this and I simply told my kids the truth, let them know I am working on it and with the supernatural power of God in my life I will see victory! I am seeing great freedom in this area of my life.

PLAY PRACTICAL JOKES: My oldest son is a stud when it comes to practical jokes. He always wins and everyone else looses. THAT CHANGED! One night he was taking his “beauty bath”, music going and eyes closed. Kylie and Tifton (my other kiddos) and I found a frog outside, snuck in the bathroom and threw it on him while he was in the bath! IT WAS AWESOME! He screamed, yelled and climbed the walls. Parents, you will connect with your kid’s hearts if you learn to play and joke with them.

PRAY OVER THEM: Every morning I have the honor of taking my kids to school. I use this as a time to pray over and with them. I pray that God would give them courage, eyes to see the unloved at school and spiritual influence.

LONG WINDED DISCIPLINE: The joke around Team Sprad’s home is don’t let dad discipline us, he talks way too much! Go to mom, she just gets it over with. Here is the process I typically use when disciplining my kiddos… 1) Listen to their heart. 2) Give them a chance to explain. 3) Speak truth and correct wrong thinking. 4) Share “how” you will discipline them. 5) Love and pray with them. Yes, you read that right. It’s a five step process.

GIVE PERMISSION: My wife and I have given our kids permission to lovingly and respectfully come and talk to us when we are out of line. This one can be tough to swallow, but the reality is that parents do step out of line.

TURN OVER YOUR PHONE: I have a tendency to be on my phone all the time! I check email, facebook, twitter and run EpicParent all from my phone. Parents, we must have CELL FREE ZONES! I encourage all parents to declare a weekly time when they will not be on their cell phone, and they hand it over to their kiddos just to make sure.

{Originally published in 2011}

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2015/02/19/top-10-ways-to-connect-with-your-kids-heart/feed/61294Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Church Member (For Your Kids)http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/25/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-church-member-for-your-kids/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/25/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-church-member-for-your-kids/#commentsWed, 25 Jul 2012 13:00:19 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=4463Don’t you just love all of the practical help that our Top 10 Lists provide?!!! But there’s more! Here’s another Top 10 list that you can find within the pages of our July Resource of the month, Raising Kids for True Greatness. Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Church Member (For Your Kids) Make a […]]]>

Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Church Member (For Your Kids)

Make a decision in your heart to love going to church. That’s all it takes. A decision. Once it’s made, you’ll love going to church.

Bring your Bible with you, and learn how to follow your teacher, pastor, or youth leaders as they teach you from it.

When you get up on Sunday morning, ask God to help you learn everything He wants you to learn at church that day.

Pray for your pastor, youth leaders, worship leaders, and Sunday school teachers at least once during the week. Ask God to bless them and encourage them in their efforts on behalf of the church

Look out for the new kids, awkward kids, lonely kids, or outcast kids. Enfold them every time you are at a church gathering.

If there is a discussion in class, participate in it. Don’t just sit back and be unresponsive.

Always love, encourage, and cooperate with the people who work with you at church (whether professional or volunteer). Voice appreciation for their efforts. Always thank your teacher for the lesson and the worship leaders for their efforts.

Refuse to speak disparagingly about anyone who works with or for you at church. Never participate in critical discussion about them with friends or a friend’s parents. If you have a problem with a leader, first take it to God in prayer and then go to the person individually and discuss it. Always rise above gossip.

Go to church with an attitude of what you can give to it rather than what you can get out of it. Go ready to help, to serve, to sing, to listen, to learn, to make new friends, to reach out to visitors, and to enjoy being with God’s people.

Make sure that you always use your time at church to connect more closely to the heart of God.

Any other suggestions? We’d love to hear from YOU.

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/25/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-church-member-for-your-kids/feed/14463Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Teammate (For Your Kids)http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/11/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-teammate-for-your-kids/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/11/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-teammate-for-your-kids/#commentsWed, 11 Jul 2012 13:00:47 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=4366With the beginning of school lurking on the horizon (in AZ we start in mid-August), we thought it would be appropriate to highlight one of the Top 10 Lists that you can find within the pages of our July Resource of the month, Raising Kids for True Greatness. Top 10 Ways to Be a Great […]]]>

Any other suggestions? We’d love to hear from YOU.

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2012/07/11/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-teammate-for-your-kids/feed/14366Top 10 Ways to Teach Your Young Children to Put God Firsthttp://familymatters.net/blog/2011/07/25/top-10-ways-to-teach-your-young-children-to-put-god-first/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/07/25/top-10-ways-to-teach-your-young-children-to-put-god-first/#commentsMon, 25 Jul 2011 12:32:11 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=2027We’re back with another Top 10 List from Raising Kids for True Greatness. If you’ve missed our other Top 10 Lists be sure to go back and read them as they are full of great wisdom and insight. Without further ado… The Top 10 List for this week is … Top 10 Ways to Teach Your […]]]>

Top 10 Ways to Teach Your Young Children to Put God First

Consistently read them stories at bedtime that tell about God’s mighty power and love.

When a frightening or troubling situation comes up, gather them around and show them how to put themselves in God’s hands through prayer.

Show them how to pray for those they love, as well as those who need God’s love, every night at bedtime.

Welcome them each morning with a positive reminder of God’s love and design for their lives. (An example: “This is another great day that God has given us to shine for Him. You have a wonderful personality, and it’s going to be fun to see how God enables you to use it for Him today.”)

Allow God’s presence to become second nature in your everyday activities (such as praying at mealtime, pointing out wonders in nature, observing how God works in people around you, singing songs to Him, etc.).

Avoid evoking God’s name in an intimidating manner to express displeasure with disobedience.

Make going to church and Sunday school a fun, happy and nonnegotiable part of your family life.

Help your children hide God’s Word in their hearts by memorizing key Scriptures that tell of God’s love, mercy, grace, protection, and power.

Make kindness, sharing, and consideration for every member of the family a neutral outgrowth of your love for God.

Avoid strong-arming your children to accept Christ as their Savior. Treat them the way God treats you (with grace), and let the Holy Spirit draw them to Himself on His timetable.

Top 10 Ways to Build a Great Attitude in Your Kids’ Hearts Toward God

1. Have a joyful faith. Believe big. Trust huge. Let your children see a belief in God that makes you a much happier and more agreeable person to live with.

2. Be actively involved in a thriving church. Find a church that exudes a mighty job and an exciting attitude toward God.

3. No matter what church you go to, refuse to criticize the people who serve you. Love your pastor, worship leader, youth workers, Sunday school teachers, and volunteers. If there is a legitimate concern, deal with the person face-to-face in a spirit of grace, love and kindness.

4. Do not speak unkindly about your church, or people who serve in the church, around your children. The church is Jesus’s bride, and if we insult the church, we insult the Lord. Also, bitter talk and a critical spirit make us a pawn in Satan’s hand.

5. Pray for the people who serve your church.

6. Pull your weight. Volunteer your time, your spiritual gifts, and your sweat to carry the burden of service of your church. Sign up to work in the nursery and Sunday school program. Remember: It’s not about us.

7. Set the example for your children by consistently supporting your church financially.

8. If the worship is getting too loud and too enthusiastic for you, bring some tissue for your ears, smile, worship your heart out, and be excited for the new generation of believers who are being ministered to. Once again: it’s not about us.

9. Decide once and for all that you love God’s Word. Make it a daily part of your routine. When you pray, lift up each one of your children and grandchildren by name…every day. Let your kids find God’s Word in your lap and His love in your heart.

10. Bring your family to church every Sunday, and encourage them during the week. Pray with them and for them. Minister to your children’s hearts throughout the week so that they can show up for church ready to love God and love others.

Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Employee {For Parents}

1. Make a commitment to love your fellow workers – especially the ones who are difficult to love.

2. Realize that your attitude toward your job is influencing the way your kids view work as well as the way they view you as a person. Be grateful for your job, and always speak well of the opportunity you have been given to earn a living.

3. Show respect and honor for your employer, supervisors, directors, and immediate bosses. Always speak well of them and to them.

4. If you make a mistake or fall short of expectations, admit it immediately. Never hide behind excuses or pass blame to a fellow employee, even when you’ve failed badly.

5. Never steal ideas. Be quick to give credit to the source.

6. As much as possible, participate in office social functions. Be a team player inside as well as outside the work arena.

7. Encourage fellow employees who are struggling. To the degree that it is within your power, do whatever you can to help them succeed.

8. Refuse to be a part of office gossip about supervisors or fellow employees. Remember, if you help take people down, ultimately, you go down with them.

9. Never take a single thing from the office that belongs to the company (not a paper clip, pencil, stamp, or piece of paper). If your company is generous on these matters, still ask the person in authority if it’s all right, and insist on paying for it. Give back more than you are given. Always turn in accurate and absolutely honest expense accounts.

10. Work hard to improve your position in the company. In the meantime, don’t complain about your pay. Trust God to see to it that you are fairly dealt with on payday.

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/03/02/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-employee-for-parents/feed/21439Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Member of the Familyhttp://familymatters.net/blog/2011/02/21/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-member-of-the-family/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/02/21/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-member-of-the-family/#commentsMon, 21 Feb 2011 15:12:57 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=1393Happy Monday!!!

Top 10 Ways to Be a Great Member of the Family

3. Remember, “please” and “thank you” are not just good manners; they’re the calling cards of a grateful heart.

4. Have a lot of fun, just not at the expense of anyone else.

5. Each week, do your best to eat as many meals as possible together as a family. You’ll cut the chance of your kids using tobacco and drugs in half and double the changes they’ll bring home A’s on their report cards!!

6. Respect one another’s space and stuff. Ask, and it most likely will be given to you.

7. Guard family traditions, and do your best to celebrate all birthdays, holidays, and major milestones.

8. Guard the morals and integrity of everyone around you. Be sensitive about how you communicate, what you view, and whom you bring into the family circle.

9. Be quick to rally around a family member who is down, whether it’s a result of sickness, injury, failure, rejection, or discouragement.

10. Assume that the Lord Jesus is an ex officio participant in every detail of your family. Make sure He always feels at home and comfortable with what’s going on.

Now it’s your turn – What are some ways you encourage your children to be a great family member?

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/02/21/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-member-of-the-family/feed/21393Top 10 Ways to Help Your Kids Get the Most Out of Organized Sportshttp://familymatters.net/blog/2011/01/17/top-10-ways-to-help-your-kids-get-the-best-out-of-organized-sports/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/01/17/top-10-ways-to-help-your-kids-get-the-best-out-of-organized-sports/#commentsMon, 17 Jan 2011 14:53:46 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=1255

Top 10 Ways to Help Your Kids Get the Most Out of Organized Sports

1. Avoid keeping statistics on your kids’ performance. That’s what parents who are wrapped up in the success fantasy do. Just keep encouraging your child to play hard, fair, and passionately and to be a good member of the team.

2. Always encourage your children to respect and obey the coach, regardless of the coach’s effectiveness.

3. Never ever upbraid umpires or referees regarding a call they’ve made. They’re humans. If you think a bad call has been made, accept it and move on. Remember, it’s just a game.

4. Avoid getting involved in any disparaging discussions with other parents about coaches, athletes, officials, umpires, or other parents. Encourage them to support these people instead of talking negatively about them.

5. Make your children finish their commitment to a season, even if they aren’t enjoying themselves. This will be great practice for their future lives when they’ll be called on to finish a lot of commitments that aren’t any fun.

6. Encourage all of the kids on the team, not just your child.

7. Be sensitive to the kids who may not have a lot of support from their parents or are having stress in their family. Give them rides to and from practices and games. Invite them and their parents) to join you after games for ice cream.

8. If your kids are on a winning team, remind them that humility should be their ongoing attitude. Discourage your children from gloating in victory or basking in applause.

9. Don’t allow your children to show off when they’ve performed well. They’re supposed to do their best. Teach them to win with graciousness.

10. If your children are on a losing team, don’t criticize the coach. Instead, encourage the coach and say how much you appreciate the effort he or she is putting into your child and the team as a whole.

BONUS: Don’t focus your children on winning. Focus them on playing their best and working in harmony with the team, and the victories will take care of themselves. Greatness beats success every time.

]]>http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/01/17/top-10-ways-to-help-your-kids-get-the-best-out-of-organized-sports/feed/31255Top 10 Ways to be a Great Neighbor (For Parents)http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/01/10/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-neighbor-for-parents/
http://familymatters.net/blog/2011/01/10/top-10-ways-to-be-a-great-neighbor-for-parents/#commentsMon, 10 Jan 2011 14:20:29 +0000http://familymatters.net/blog/?p=1221I don’t know about you, but one of my goals for 2011 is to better serve my immediate community. And by immediate community I’m including my neighbors, friends, church community and coworkers.

Specifically, our neighbors provide some of the greatest opportunities we have as believers to serve one another. God has placed us in our exact homes/apartments for HIS purposes.

Ten Ways to be a Great Neighbor

(For Parents)

1. Be a good friend to all of your neighbors, not just the ones who align with your value system or your spiritual convictions.

2. Keep your yard and the outside of your house looking sharp. Never allow your house to bring a negative appearance to the neighborhood. Keep it painted, the grass cut, and the landscaping both up-to-date and maintained.

3. Pray for your neighbors, especially the ones who are the most difficult.

4. As much as possible, be quick to help your neighbors with things they are doing on their house, yard, or car—or with things they are struggling with in their lives.

5. Be friendly, kind, and encouraging whenever and wherever you encounter your neighbors.

6. Refuse to get pulled into neighborhood gossip. Living on a block with a bunch of desperate housewives is no fun for anyone.

7. Be especially encouraging to your neighbors’ children—especially the kids who come from homes that might be overstressed (as a result of debt, marital difficulties, or lack of spiritual direction). Don’t avoid the families whose kids are out of control. You may have to limit their involvement with your children, but that doesn’t mean you turn your back on their needs.

8. Welcome all new neighbors: whether married, divorced, single, cohabitating, gay, or straight. They are your neighbors. God put you near them to show His love, grace, and mercy. Invite them over to your home for dinner soon after they get settled. Make them feel welcome and safe.

9. Refuse to play the comparison game. Be genuinely happy for all the good things that happen in your neighbors’ lives (new cars, new furnishings, a raise at work, a great accomplishment of a family member, etc.).

10. Be ready to weep and mourn with your neighbors when life doesn’t go their way.