I posted it all up on my bulletin board, themes and intentions and all, and rolled into the first week of the year on a wave of possibility, expecting my life ­– and myself – to be, well… different.

And then what happened? I haven’t completed any of it.

It kind of goes along the lines of Bono’s famous line, “Nothing changes on New Year’s Day.”

Now that’s not entirely true. We all have the opportunity to grow or even begin anew every day, and you’re never entirely the same person you were yesterday.

But the truth is, in most cases, change happens gradually.

The problem is, we put so much pressure on the new year to be some massive catalyst for a whole new life, outlook, body, set of habits, etc. overnight, only to realize that when you wake up on January 2 you are… still you.

This is one of the reasons why so many women who work hard to lose weight gain it right back. They expect a smaller body to make them happy, only to discover that they’re still the same person with the same set of life challenges and they’re really not any happier, just hungrier. And then it’s like, “Oh shit, now what?”

The other thing I know is that when we set out to overcome our self-sabotaging patterns (one of my biggies being procrastination and manufacturing little dramas and fires to distract me), usually that pattern rears up in a BIG way.

It’s a matter of job security. Your inner saboteur is highly invested in keeping you safe which means keeping you exactly where you are – that’s it’s job. So when it senses it’s about to get a pink slip it suddenly becomes a top performer and even goes for a promotion.

Sometimes it’s a matter of the Universe throwing you a little test and saying, “Ok, so how badly do you want this new way of being?” You know, that one issue or relationship that challenges you the most rears it’s ugly head. Other times it’s a sneak attack of conveniently getting sick or injured so you can’t move forward. (For me it’s been a combination of both of these issues these past 2 weeks!)

And if you’re not AWARE, then it’s a slippery slope, because you can easily interpret that as failure and just give up.

So if the problem is that we put too much pressure on the New Year, which causes equal pushback from our saboteur, what can we do instead?

The truth is we DO have the capacity to evolve and grow. And it’s highly likely that by the end of 2016 you WILL be a different, stronger, wiser version of you and quite possibly with a totally different set of circumstances if you choose.

It’s all about CALIBRATION. Instead of expecting yourself to be totally different overnight, each day you can inquire, “How can I calibrate toward the feeling, experience, or result I desire?” “What’s one small step, thought, or shift I can make in that direction?”

Even if that old pattern comes up, you have the opportunity to engage with it in just an ever so slightly different way. Even if you don’t nail it, that’s still moving in the right direction. And that is cause for celebration.

And here’s a little secret: What you celebrate grows.

I came across a beautiful question the other day and I offer it to you now:

“What am I willing to do differently in order to make today unlike yesterday?”

This is what’s now up on my bulletin board above all the other goals and intentions, because ultimately that’s what its all about. A kinder, gentler way to creating massive change.

The truth is, who you are today in this moment IS enough. And yes, you can still desire to grow and evolve. Even just one degree of change will eventually put a ship on a whole new course.

So if this whole “New Year, New You” crap isn’t really panning out just yet (because let’s face it, it never does), be kind to yourself. Think calibration.

PS. If you’re having trouble fulfilling your new year’s intentions, or even getting clear on what you really want – let’s hop on the phone and see if I can help! I’d love to support you in creating a rich, inspiring, and attainable plan for your greatest nourishment in 2016. Click here to apply for a complimentary 1-1 Action Plan Session now.