tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-51708835317933007802015-03-30T17:23:35.772-07:00Redemption WhispersPsalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.comBlogger112125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-11127916744057906902015-03-30T06:22:00.005-07:002015-03-30T06:22:51.551-07:00In the middle of a whirlwind....I keep putting off posting, thinking I will get a picture of Serenity's hand.......and that has not happened yet. :)&nbsp; I will try again today.&nbsp; But here is the update...<br /><br />Serenity's hand surgery (that took twice as long as they anticipated!) was very successful!&nbsp; The weeks in the cast were hard on everyone - patience was greatly needed here for one bored little girl.&nbsp; After the full cast, they made her a splint to keep her hand straight and the fingers spread apart so the skin grafts would heal.&nbsp; Can't quite call that a success as she quickly figured out how to get her fingers free!&nbsp;<br /><br />We were all excited to see what her reaction was to having fingers when they took the cast off.&nbsp; There was really no way to be able to communicate that to her ahead of time.&nbsp; Handsome was the one who took her and he described it as stunned shock.&nbsp; True shock.&nbsp; Not the joyful shock we expected, but stunned shock.&nbsp; I can't even imagine what it must have felt like to bend areas she had never been able to move before, especially with skin grafts, nerves, etc.&nbsp; the hand had quite a covering of scabs and funny colored skin due to all the grafting and work that was done.&nbsp; Come to think of it, maybe it was better I didn't post pictures!<br /><br />We tried to prepare the rest of the kids, but they still had a hard time with it the first few days after the cast was off.&nbsp; It isn't pretty, but now she has function.&nbsp; Very hard for young minds to weigh that the right way.&nbsp; I had talked with The Helper about Hope's surgery - how I thought I might have a rough time saying goodbye to the little face I loved even though the new face would be better for her long-term.&nbsp; Frankly, she thought I was crazy.&nbsp; But she told me after seeing Serenity's hand change, that she finally understood.<br /><br />Two weeks ago, they changed the hand splint to a different splint.&nbsp; Now she can move her wrist, but the fingers are kept apart by a brace so the skin does not start to grow back together.&nbsp; I will still try to get a picture of that one.&nbsp; Just for those that are interested - we found out with Grace that skin is a highly connective tissue.&nbsp; That is how God designed it so that cut heal - the skin grows back together.&nbsp; However with Grace's curled hands and Serenity's new skin grafts - we don't want the skin to grow together in those areas - thus the braces for them both.&nbsp; This new brace she will wear for a total of three weeks day and night with brief times off to wiggle and clean it.&nbsp; Then it will switch to just night time for 3 months.&nbsp;<br /><br />The day we switch to just the brace at night is the surgery on the other hand - next Tuesday.&nbsp; The other hand already had one finger separated in Bulgaria, so it will just be separating the other pinkie.&nbsp; I am praying this is a MUCH easier surgery that the other.&nbsp; Then we will do the whole cast, splint, different splint thing all over again.&nbsp; It is a GOOD thing - but a little hard to gear up for. :)<br /><br />In the meantime, Grace went in for a recheck on her hips from the dysplasia surgery last June.&nbsp; She also saw the rehab doc (who does the botox and braces) and the neurologist for her seizure meds.&nbsp; The hips look fine but they have decided that she does need to wear a brace to help slow the scoliosis.&nbsp; This was HARD news.&nbsp; She will have to be in the brace 18 hours a day - only off when she lays flat.&nbsp; Handsome goes to pick up the brace today.&nbsp; We were told that it is fairly soft.&nbsp; Sometimes though, I have noticed that we just hit the point where something seems to be the tipping point and it suddenly feels like "too much" for a child to need to have done.&nbsp; It is purely emotional - but it still happens.&nbsp; For some reason, the brace just seems to be that tipping point emotionally.&nbsp; We just really, really don't want her to have to have it.&nbsp; We will obviously do it because it is best for her - but it just rubs the heart the wrong way right now. :(&nbsp; I am sure in a few days it will just be part of life, but this morning it hurts my heart.<br /><br />As we were emotionally stewing on that, Serenity and Hope had a follow up appointment with the craniofacial doctors.&nbsp; Serenity came to have a spot on her head checked.&nbsp; Skip the next few sentences if you have a queasy stomach!&nbsp; There is one spot along her incision that we just couldn't get to heal.&nbsp; Her hair would get stuck in it and when we tried to wash it, the whole scab would pull off.&nbsp; A spot about the size of two quarters.&nbsp; I worked and worked since the surgery in November to get it to heal.&nbsp; We had a nurse look at it once and she gave us some ideas, but it still kept getting pussy and pulling off.&nbsp; I finally cut a big spot of hair all around it and it seemed to be finally healing.&nbsp; But then when I washed it one day, I realized that a piece of the plastic "skull" was poking out.&nbsp; I have a strong stomach - I have done a lot of medical things - but this made my stomach flip and I turned green.&nbsp; Especially when the piece pull out when I was cleaning the spot again.&nbsp; Eww!&nbsp; It honestly looked like a little clear piece of lego.&nbsp; This was two days before the appointment.&nbsp; When the surgeon's looked at it, they said sometimes that happens, and now it should heal again - to just keep it clean and the hair cut back.&nbsp; Okay.&nbsp; I felt like we had dodged a bullet on skin grafts, etc.&nbsp; So back home trying to keep it clean....only to find another piece is sticking out now.&nbsp; (Stomach does a little flip, ugh.)&nbsp; So I have a feeling we will be going back soon.&nbsp; My guess is that they will move her next surgery sooner so they can repair the area after they expand the forehead.<br /><br />Hope was there for a pre-pre-op appointment after an MRI.&nbsp; Hope has not had to be in the doctor's office for quite a while other than a brief check up in November.&nbsp; We keep her home other than a few trips to church or family.&nbsp; This was the first time in a waiting room in almost a year.&nbsp; A very <i>quiet</i> waiting room.....at least until we got there.&nbsp; Hope makes all kinds of noises - it has gotten the nickname "smoping" here.&nbsp; It is hard to describe other than loud bursts of noise with severe body motions - like a yell with hands flopping everywhere, and then another noise with hitting herself.&nbsp; We know that if she is feeling excited or nervous, there will be "smoping" going on.&nbsp; Well, this definitely triggered it.&nbsp; I am going to lay this out there, just in case there are other moms with severe kiddos reading this - this was the first time I was embarrassed by her behavior.&nbsp; I wish I could say I was as strong as other moms I have read about that just keep smiling and don't worry about what others thought - but not this time.&nbsp; I was embarrassed and heartbroken over how "severe" she must have looked to others.&nbsp; Her face always draws attention - and I understand that - but the behavior was really, really an attention-getter this time.&nbsp; It started to freak out the other children there.&nbsp; I finally found the quietest corner I could and wrapped her in her blanket and hummed to her - all the while trying not to cry.&nbsp; I love my girl - the weight of the damage that has been done just felt too heavy at the moment...<br /><br />The MRI was in the early morning, so by the time we got to the afternoon appointment, she was "smoping" in full gear.&nbsp; However, the waiting room at the hospital was much noisier and full of life so it didn't seem so bad.&nbsp; Plus, I was bouncing a loud, unhappy Little Man and trying to keep Serenity reigned in - so I was a bit distracted. ;-)<br /><br />The MRI looked very good to the surgeons.&nbsp; Once again, we had a room FULL of people as every visiting or training doctor wants to come take a look.&nbsp; There was actually a doctor from Poland there this time!&nbsp; They talked with me about how they would do the surgery.&nbsp; I will try to scan the MRI and their sketching and post it here.&nbsp; Fascinating.&nbsp; Simple fascinating.&nbsp; And a little stomach churning. ;-)&nbsp;<br /><br />Now we just wait for surgery dates for Serenity and Hope - as well as going to see dentists and optomologists for them both.&nbsp; Mimi also needs to see the eye doctor as it has been quite a while and her lazy eye is not looking any better.&nbsp; So still a great deal of appointments and decisions out there.<br /><br />There is a lot more to say, but I am out of time this morning.&nbsp; We are headed off to the federal building to get our fingerprints done for our dossier.&nbsp; The process has really come to a complete stop until we get our USCIS approval - very disheartening - so I am glad to get this show on the road again.....<br /><br />Thank you for all your prayers -&nbsp; Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-70671035639294815722015-02-14T08:13:00.001-08:002015-02-14T08:13:14.453-08:00Here she is!They did make it home at midnight.&nbsp; We are all tired and sipping coffee.&nbsp; Serenity is ready to take on the world!&nbsp; They said to keep her arm propped up all day...um, okay, I will also try to hold back the ocean tide while I am at it.....<br /><br />Love this precious girl!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D73ss6vFLmM/VN90CQsmi1I/AAAAAAAABTs/qWpTVnSQH64/s1600/ser%2Bsurgery.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D73ss6vFLmM/VN90CQsmi1I/AAAAAAAABTs/qWpTVnSQH64/s1600/ser%2Bsurgery.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-60838825673175875182015-02-13T19:04:00.000-08:002015-02-13T19:04:15.567-08:00Quick updateSerenity was supposed to have surgery at 1 p.m.&nbsp; <i>Supposed </i>to.&nbsp; Instead, they finally started surgery at 3:45.&nbsp; It was supposed to be a 2 hour surgery.&nbsp; <i>Supposed</i> to.&nbsp; Handsome called me at 6 p.m. and they had just come out with an update....They said it will most likely be a couple more HOURS.&nbsp; They said that there was not any complications, they were just taking their time and being thorough.&nbsp;<br /><br />Wow.<br /><br />We are hoping that Serenity, Handsome, and The Helper are home before midnight.&nbsp; We are praying that they do not keep her overnight as Handsome has to work tomorrow.<br /><br />Please continue to lift her up in your prayers.<br /><br />I will update in the morning.Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-80815065484638565842015-02-12T18:50:00.001-08:002015-02-12T18:50:17.588-08:00Urgent NeedLittle <span style="color: purple;">Ashlyn<span style="color: #073763;"> </span></span>is in desperate need of&nbsp; a family.&nbsp; She is 17 months old and has some severe heart defects.&nbsp; Amazing things can be done in the US, but beyond that, the love of a family and knowing you belong effects down to the soul.&nbsp; More can be read <a href="http://waitingchildinfo.com/2013/09/01/ashlyn-urgent/" target="_blank">here</a>.&nbsp; Please pray for a family to move forward for this tiny little blessing.&nbsp; Pray for their needs to be meet to be able to move swiftly.&nbsp; How my heart breaks!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--B_l6q6Np70/VN1mQONA6pI/AAAAAAAABTQ/-gOhDi78CkM/s1600/ashlyn_pic_1-21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--B_l6q6Np70/VN1mQONA6pI/AAAAAAAABTQ/-gOhDi78CkM/s1600/ashlyn_pic_1-21.jpg" height="320" width="228" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cXrXD0rsr9w/VN1mS3HIX3I/AAAAAAAABTY/KGKl-e0mibc/s1600/ashlyn_pic_21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cXrXD0rsr9w/VN1mS3HIX3I/AAAAAAAABTY/KGKl-e0mibc/s1600/ashlyn_pic_21.jpg" height="228" width="320" /></a></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-52651149304525839632015-02-09T07:40:00.000-08:002015-02-09T07:40:02.922-08:00Was that the calm? I think I missed it....I always have to laugh (or cry) when I realize that we have gone through the "calm" before the storm....and we missed it! :)&nbsp; I think it is another one of those times.&nbsp; After Serenity's long hospital stay in Oct/Nov, it was time to launch into Thanksgiving and Christmas.&nbsp; In that time, we began our paperwork for the adoption of our newest blessings, waiting far away....Then it was "holiday-detox" time - with continuing social worker visits, a million or so doctors' appointments as each kiddo needs to been seen by a doctor for the home study, more paperwork, and just busy everyday life.&nbsp;&nbsp;<br /><br />I had just taken a deep breath and smiled at the relatively empty calendar.&nbsp; Even as I did so, I thought, "This isn't going to last!"....Sure enough!&nbsp; I got several phone calls last week as the doctors at Children's had another "round table" discussion on what is next for Serenity and Hope.&nbsp;<br /><br />The amazing hand surgeon has been chomping at the bit to "release" the fingers on Serenity's hands.&nbsp; She has an amazing ability to use them already with only the thumbs and one finger free.&nbsp; The other kids are a little afraid she will have super powers if they are all free!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XdzuRwKSIuY/VNjP8c1ME5I/AAAAAAAABTA/UJPUvgdvTlg/s1600/hands.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XdzuRwKSIuY/VNjP8c1ME5I/AAAAAAAABTA/UJPUvgdvTlg/s1600/hands.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div>In Bulgaria, they had released finger on the right hand - but she is left-handed! :(&nbsp; So the doctor is starting with her left hand this time.&nbsp; Amazingly, it is only a day surgery - on February 13th.&nbsp; Then six weeks later, he will do the right hand.&nbsp; We are still waiting to find out if they are going to release all the fingers, or just the pinkies and pointers.&nbsp; In general, we move the two middle fingers together unless it is a specific task like typing, playing the piano, etc.&nbsp; If I understand it right, it will depend on if the bones are fused together as well as other things like her fingernails, amount of skin, etc.<br /><br />Okay....got those on my calendar - along with all the pre-ops and post-ops visits.&nbsp; Oh, yes, they are also going to do the sedated hearing test that we couldn't do with the second hand surgery.&nbsp; Hooray for combo visits!<br /><br />Umm, not done yet.&nbsp; She will have her front vault expansion surgery (her forehead) in June.&nbsp; Oooh, okay, will pray it will not effect the extended family camping trip.<br /><br />Oh, yes, and the doctors also discussed Hope.&nbsp; Her facial surgery will be this year.&nbsp; (I get butterflies just thinking about it!)&nbsp; It turns out that there is a doctor who will be leaving (I believe this is an internship) in July and she is begging to be part of Hope's surgery as it is so very rare.&nbsp; So it is being scheduled for May.&nbsp; Gulp.&nbsp; I am very, very excited and nervous at the same time.&nbsp; It is hard to explain.&nbsp; I want this for her - for her vision, for eating, for the stigma that is on her because of it.&nbsp; But I fell in love with her precious little face exactly the way it is - how can I say goodbye to it?&nbsp; Just picture someone you love - and then picture their face being changed forever.....You will always love them...but there will also be some grieving as the changes come.&nbsp; I also worry for her little heart.&nbsp; <i>Any</i> change is hard on her.&nbsp; Even if I change the spoon or the bowl I feed her with - it throws her for a loop.&nbsp; I just don't know how her little heart will handle the hospital stay.&nbsp; I don't have a lot of details yet on the length of the stay, so I am just trying to lay it at my Savior's feet.<br /><br />One of the good things of all of this is that the major surgeries will be done before it is time for Handsome to go get Brooke and Jillian from their home country.&nbsp; I am very, very thankful for that.&nbsp; But it does mean that the pace of life will be picking up very quickly around here.&nbsp; I have to take a deep breath, thank God for His goodness, and get us ready for the next journey.<br /><br />Please pray for our pixie-girl this week.&nbsp; Pray for our paperwork to continue to move forward for the adoption.&nbsp; We should have our home study in hand this week.&nbsp; We will immediately send it on to USCIS for immigration approval.&nbsp; In approx 6-8 weeks, we will have that approval and can move on to get all the pieces of our dossier authenticated at the state, then the federal level, as well as from the Chinese embassy.&nbsp; Again, another couple of weeks, is my understanding.&nbsp; Then FINALLY, we can send the dossier to China and just wait and pray as it goes through their system.&nbsp; Some days it is so hard to wait...<br /><br />Until He comes....Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-59408605755027749332015-01-23T06:14:00.000-08:002015-01-23T06:14:17.212-08:00Fungus and prayer requests....Yes, that about sums up life here right now...fungus and prayers.<br /><br />We took Serenity in for her "pre-op" appointments on Wednesday. "Pre-op" seems a little too serious for the procedure we were to have today - she needs a sedated hearing test to be able to accurately determine where in her ears there is a hearing problem.&nbsp; That way the right type of hearing aid can be used.&nbsp; It is strongly suspected that it is her middle/inner ear, but they need to know for sure.&nbsp;<br /><br />The day on Wednesday started off with traffic worse than normal, so we were late. :(&nbsp; The first appointment went fine, other than Little Man is getting pretty squirrely at 8 months old.&nbsp; The poor guy has been to more doctors' appointments than any other child because he has to go to <i>all</i> the appointments until he decides to start eating Gerber foods and not be so cranky.&nbsp; It isn't fair to leave him with others who cannot feed him or comfort him!&nbsp; Anyway.... Then we moved on to a nurse visit because one little area on her incision is not healing well.&nbsp; That was a little traumatic for Serenity.&nbsp; Deep breath....and move on to the last visit.&nbsp; It was one of those days we were counting the minutes until we could head home.&nbsp; This was just the doctor peeking in her ears to make sure they were clear.&nbsp; No problem, right?&nbsp; Uh, yes.....a problem.&nbsp; One of her ear tubes had plugged.&nbsp; Not good.&nbsp; Then the doctor asks - and only those of you with an active tornado like Serenity will understand the panic that washed over me - "Does she stick things in her ears?....Like cotton?"&nbsp; Well, I can imagine Serenity sticking LOTS of things in her ears - as she sticks things everywhere else!&nbsp; (Her favorite trick right now is to pop her "nose" off her trach and then plug the hole with her thumb to see how fast I will come running as I hear her struggling to breathe!)&nbsp; I think my answer to the doctor was something like, "Uhhhhhhhhhh.....".&nbsp;&nbsp; He pulled out the massive electronic scope to see better.&nbsp; He ended up pulling out the plugged tube to find that there is a fungus growing in her ear.&nbsp; Not that uncommon (we have done that before with Romeo), but it can be very hard to thoroughly get rid of the fungus.&nbsp; We have 3 weeks worth of meds twice a day and then will go see the doc again in 4-5 weeks.&nbsp; If it is clear, we will reschedule.....which is making the test probably around the end of March, beginning of April at this point.&nbsp; Deep sigh.&nbsp; After grumbling a bit in prayer, I just left it with trust in Him that there is a plan.&nbsp; It makes for an easier morning this morning!&nbsp;<br /><br />Please pray for quick healing for her.&nbsp; Pray for the schedule as it will begin to be put together for the spring - Serenity's next skull surgery, preparation for Hope's surgery on her face, more botox injections to ease Grace's CP.&nbsp; So many good things - with so much pain attached.&nbsp; I am so very thankful as always for the blessings of amazing doctors and hospitals....what grace we have been given. <br /><br />I also have a prayer request for this beautiful little man:<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-cJVwc0-iF78/VMJUwlU4fHI/AAAAAAAABSs/KFYPgJ_Ih9w/s1600/Aaron%2B2%2BCHI.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-cJVwc0-iF78/VMJUwlU4fHI/AAAAAAAABSs/KFYPgJ_Ih9w/s1600/Aaron%2B2%2BCHI.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>This is Aaron.&nbsp; He is currently in a large Asian country.&nbsp; He has complex heart problems.&nbsp; It has been determined that the surgery he needs cannot be done in his country.&nbsp; However - Praise the Lord! - he was able to have a shunt placed just today that will help.&nbsp; But he is in the ICU alone.&nbsp; No mom to sing over him.&nbsp; No dad to hold his hands.&nbsp; By the rules, the Nanny in this picture cannot be with him.&nbsp;<br /><br />This is just killing my heart.&nbsp; He is tinier than Little man by 12 lbs, yet he is 5 months older.&nbsp; There are so many children I stop and pray for....but then some are just like a kick in the stomach and I just can't catch a full breath.<br /><br />Please pray for comfort and peace for him.&nbsp; Pray that the Lord is singing over him.&nbsp; Most of all, please pray that a family steps forward in faith to make him their own.&nbsp;<br /><br />Until He comes....Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-63344567838547489832015-01-14T16:13:00.001-08:002015-01-14T16:13:03.940-08:00Prayers answered and PA!!!Serenity passed her swallow study - thank the Lord!&nbsp; We need to thicken her drinks at half strength for a week and then we are back to normal!&nbsp; I am ridiculously relieved about this....one less thing is always good, right?<br /><br />Also, we received PA from China for Jillian and Brooke!&nbsp; This is Pre-Approval to continue the adoption.&nbsp; I am also ridiculously excited about this.&nbsp; One step closer to our precious new ones.&nbsp;<br /><br />And the last thing I am ridiculously pleased about...a sweet picture of Hope.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-o42EE6U-4xQ/VLcFxi01B_I/AAAAAAAABSM/7JPHXKRXxFo/s1600/Hope%2Bjan.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-o42EE6U-4xQ/VLcFxi01B_I/AAAAAAAABSM/7JPHXKRXxFo/s1600/Hope%2Bjan.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">I am truly blessed!</div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-89280931059886873922015-01-09T05:55:00.000-08:002015-01-09T05:55:16.496-08:00Prayer RequestOn Monday, Serenity is going to have a repeat swallow study.&nbsp; When they put the trach in, they did a swallow study in the hospital and saw that a small amount of fluids were going in her lungs when she drank.&nbsp; This is obviously not good!&nbsp; As a result, we have to thicken all her liquids to a "nectar" consistency.&nbsp; This wasn't totally new to us as Mimi has to have thickened liquids <i>if</i> she tries to drink something.&nbsp; (Which she does not unless we make her.)&nbsp;<br /><br />It really isn't a big deal in the scheme of things, it is just a hassle.&nbsp; Kinda that "one more thing" hassle.&nbsp; Serenity drinks a lot .... and each time it has to be thickened.&nbsp; We also have to be vigilant about not leaving cups around that she can drink out of - even more so now because she is always on the hunt for them.&nbsp; She does not like the thickened liquids and I can't say that I blame her!<br /><br />Anyway, on Monday they will do another swallow study.&nbsp; Would you join us in praying that she has adjusted to the trach and no longer needs to have the thickener?&nbsp; It would just make the day-to-day a little easier!<br /><br />A fun picture for you - though not the best quality:<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Nv13C_-nvO0/VK_Zq5fTV1I/AAAAAAAABRQ/Wuiq-O9NqjU/s1600/hope%2Bin%2Bswing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Nv13C_-nvO0/VK_Zq5fTV1I/AAAAAAAABRQ/Wuiq-O9NqjU/s1600/hope%2Bin%2Bswing.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">That happy face would be hope in a swing!&nbsp; AMAZING, huh?&nbsp; I have been praying for over a year to get an indoor swing.&nbsp; I knew this would&nbsp; be an amazing "therapy" tool for all the girls, but especially for Hope who has just never had any "sensory" integration. The problem?&nbsp; To get all the pieces we would need the price tag was almost $400.&nbsp; Gulp.&nbsp; I asked the Lord to provide, if it was His plan, but just never felt free to spend the money on it.&nbsp; We know that every dollar belongs to Him, so if we don't feel peace, we don't do it.&nbsp; At Christmas time, we <i>almost</i> bought it anyway...we just felt it would be so important...but just couldn't bring ourselves to go against what we don't feel fully comfortable with - especially with praying for every dollar needed for the new adoption.&nbsp; So, I just laid it at His feet. A week or so later, I was discussing it again with my mom as The Helper was listening and she piped in, "Hey, Mom, you know they sell swing hangers that wrap around tree branches for $25?"&nbsp; WHAT?&nbsp; Sure enough, she showed me in a catalog.&nbsp; The design of our manufactured home has "exposed" beams between some of the rooms....and they <i>just</i> fit around the last one I tried.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Thank you, Lord, for always providing!&nbsp;&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Add an outdoor swing...and TA DAH!&nbsp; We are still praying and searching for more of a hammock style swing that Grace can lay in....but I am thrilled for this right now.&nbsp; Serenity LOVED it - of course!&nbsp; Mimi wanted nothing to do with it.&nbsp; And Little Man....</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qpUnyMR364E/VK_Zz0xo95I/AAAAAAAABRY/6IWrPTOaP2E/s1600/db%2Bin%2Bswing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qpUnyMR364E/VK_Zz0xo95I/AAAAAAAABRY/6IWrPTOaP2E/s1600/db%2Bin%2Bswing.jpg" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">He squealed and laughed until he was worn out! Happy day!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Finally, Mama V ~&nbsp; I just loved your comment about visiting the blog to see Brooke's beautiful little face.&nbsp; It just gets you, huh?&nbsp; What a gift God is giving us!&nbsp; So these are for you!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hh20vbdFl2k/VK_cY9I8g4I/AAAAAAAABRk/OzPOMJIyiUA/s1600/Brooke%2B(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hh20vbdFl2k/VK_cY9I8g4I/AAAAAAAABRk/OzPOMJIyiUA/s1600/Brooke%2B(2).jpg" height="320" width="201" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VD9NqWvxIp8/VK_csRAgFOI/AAAAAAAABRs/zpISWEwl9Qc/s1600/Brooke%2B2.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VD9NqWvxIp8/VK_csRAgFOI/AAAAAAAABRs/zpISWEwl9Qc/s1600/Brooke%2B2.png" height="320" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>&nbsp; And here are a few of my precious Jillian.&nbsp; I completely understand why they shave their heads in the orphanages...but how I wish they wouldn't!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CCQDsSAMAuc/VK_dAKdtsAI/AAAAAAAABR0/4gZsdrL4kss/s1600/Jillian3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CCQDsSAMAuc/VK_dAKdtsAI/AAAAAAAABR0/4gZsdrL4kss/s1600/Jillian3.jpg" height="320" width="255" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-KqrgvPDzLKk/VK_dDbm4UcI/AAAAAAAABR8/G5cFGi5fuhA/s1600/Jillian5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-KqrgvPDzLKk/VK_dDbm4UcI/AAAAAAAABR8/G5cFGi5fuhA/s1600/Jillian5.jpg" height="297" width="320" /></a></div><br />Don't worry, little one...we will let that hair grow.&nbsp; Your big sisters can't wait to play with it!<br /><br />Please continue to pray for our Savior to move the mountains to get these little ones home.&nbsp; We have our final visit with the social worker on Monday.&nbsp; I am praying that she will be able to complete the home study very quickly after that...then on to USCIS approval.<br /><br />To Him be the glory ~Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-77616667966149370592015-01-01T07:06:00.000-08:002015-01-01T07:06:52.864-08:00Little ones needing families....As I pray over my Jillian and Brooke ~ we have our paperwork ready to send to their country to get "PA" (preapproval) on Monday ~ I cannot help but be burdened to pray for some other precious lives so in need of families:<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">Meet Mikayla and Milo.&nbsp; This dynamic duo is so precious to my heart as they have Apert Syndrome like my little dynamo, Serenity.&nbsp; They both live in the same foster home.&nbsp; How amazing it would be to have them adopted together.&nbsp; Yes, these kiddos need quite a bit of medical intervention; but their amazing personalities and beauty make it so worth it.&nbsp; Something that always strikes Handsome and I when we are at the doctor's office or hospital is the abundance of amazing medical resources we have here in the U.S..&nbsp; They can do amazing things - relieving pain and pressure, restructuring and reshaping - the list goes on and on.&nbsp; God is faithful - He will provide all you need if you are a disciple of His.&nbsp; Please at the very least - because in reality it is the most powerful thing you can do - lift these children up in prayer. &nbsp;</div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-TqucpCq4ce8/VKVYrcuqmjI/AAAAAAAABOk/ddFRkxmhhcU/s1600/Mikayla.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-TqucpCq4ce8/VKVYrcuqmjI/AAAAAAAABOk/ddFRkxmhhcU/s1600/Mikayla.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_ECzgILhRPg/VKVYvQeojGI/AAAAAAAABOs/7vE7s2ZgyDs/s1600/Milo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_ECzgILhRPg/VKVYvQeojGI/AAAAAAAABOs/7vE7s2ZgyDs/s1600/Milo.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Then there is Ekko and Elliot.&nbsp; Another pair together in the same orphanage.&nbsp; Both have been blessed with an extra chromosome.&nbsp; Both would be amazing blessings to a family following Christ's leading.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-49t10r2YQ8M/VKVaWOLSKpI/AAAAAAAABO4/uCIi_hprAvM/s1600/Ekko.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-49t10r2YQ8M/VKVaWOLSKpI/AAAAAAAABO4/uCIi_hprAvM/s1600/Ekko.png" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-P88dPPnbfv0/VKVaYyXVmwI/AAAAAAAABPA/_4n4cFSOZII/s1600/Elliot.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-P88dPPnbfv0/VKVaYyXVmwI/AAAAAAAABPA/_4n4cFSOZII/s1600/Elliot.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">And another precious pair with Down Syndrome.&nbsp; Lucy and Caden.&nbsp; Both in the same orphanage.&nbsp; Both Lucy and Caden are listed on Reese's Rainbow.&nbsp; To see Lucy's file (called Mary Lauren) on RR, click&nbsp;<a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70091/mary-lauren" target="_blank">here</a>.&nbsp; To see Caden's file, click&nbsp;<a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/78607/caden" target="_blank">here</a>.&nbsp; Both have grants that will help with their adoption costs.</div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QFnktKBHZOw/VKVaqEcGSiI/AAAAAAAABPI/RtgQfzlXGaY/s1600/Lucy.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QFnktKBHZOw/VKVaqEcGSiI/AAAAAAAABPI/RtgQfzlXGaY/s1600/Lucy.png" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uihizmUqK1E/VKVatJ_fjAI/AAAAAAAABPQ/2iiHedvc67Y/s1600/Caden.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uihizmUqK1E/VKVatJ_fjAI/AAAAAAAABPQ/2iiHedvc67Y/s1600/Caden.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">And finally, little Rudy.&nbsp; He also has Down Syndrome.&nbsp; My kiddos love this little guy.&nbsp; We are praying he is found by a family soon - he is such a treasure.&nbsp; His file is also on RR&nbsp;<a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70513/rudy" target="_blank">here</a>.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ac2c2C5ddYw/VKVhRLhkX7I/AAAAAAAABPg/TrTjD__2GlA/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ac2c2C5ddYw/VKVhRLhkX7I/AAAAAAAABPg/TrTjD__2GlA/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">If you want more information on any of these precious treasures, please leave me a comment with your email address.&nbsp; I will not publish it.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Please, please pray for each one.</div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-41324630409628562392014-12-21T06:30:00.001-08:002014-12-21T06:30:43.279-08:00A little Christmas wish....I get up early in the mornings to have some quiet time before the day starts.&nbsp; I drink my coffee.&nbsp; I spend time in His Word and praying over the day to come and the things on my heart; friends and family, struggles and joys, a world that needs Him so desperately, the fatherless.&nbsp;<br /><br />This morning, I have my cup of coffee and just the lights on the Christmas tree on.&nbsp; It is quiet.&nbsp; Well, relatively speaking.&nbsp; I can hear the hum of the humidifier that Serenity is hooked up to at night to help keep her lungs moist with the trach.&nbsp; I hear the baby swing rocking back and forth as I try to keep Little Man asleep.&nbsp; I hear Hope "s'moping", as the kids call it, back in her bed.&nbsp; It has been part of most nights here since she came home.&nbsp; She huffs and puffs (I don't know how else to describe it) in her bed when she wakes up.&nbsp; It isn't a cry.&nbsp; That we respond to.&nbsp; It is just an "institutional" noise.&nbsp; We used to try to get up and stop her, but the girls have said that the noise doesn't wake them up anymore, but us coming in does.&nbsp; So, we let her s'mope.&nbsp; So it is <i>quiet</i> compared to the days...but always life humming around me.<br /><br />I look at the Christmas stocking hung up.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_vLfuXAXnz0/UrYx2ps7aMI/AAAAAAAAA90/F-9iHbzSKWk/s1600/blog25.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_vLfuXAXnz0/UrYx2ps7aMI/AAAAAAAAA90/F-9iHbzSKWk/s1600/blog25.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br />Sixteen lives represented.&nbsp; I think of the few short years - which seemed an eternity at the time - that it was only two - Handsome and I.&nbsp; How lonely it seemed.&nbsp; Now, I rejoice over each precious child that God has given us.&nbsp; I think of each of their stories ~ each so unique, yet also so intertwined with one another.<br /><br />Sixteen....but I have a little wish.&nbsp; I wish there were two more hanging this year.&nbsp; Two more for my two tiny daughters overseas that are waiting for us.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JZFMu1XVM9I/VJbSDRGzzMI/AAAAAAAABNY/6nYBqzW99Uw/s1600/Brooke.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-JZFMu1XVM9I/VJbSDRGzzMI/AAAAAAAABNY/6nYBqzW99Uw/s1600/Brooke.jpg" height="320" width="240" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Brooke</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qCRtmukjG6k/VJbSJzAQajI/AAAAAAAABNk/INgTmV-HF-E/s1600/Jillian.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qCRtmukjG6k/VJbSJzAQajI/AAAAAAAABNk/INgTmV-HF-E/s1600/Jillian.png" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Jillian</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Yes, the Lord has called us to <span style="color: blue;">redeem <span style="color: #444444;">two more precious little lives.&nbsp; We have the first home study visit on Monday.&nbsp; We will be turning in paperwork to their large Asian country hopefully by Tuesday.&nbsp; In two to three weeks, we should receive "PA" - which is preapproval from their country to move forward with their adoption.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: blue;"><span style="color: #444444;">&nbsp;</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: blue;"><span style="color: #444444;">Little Brooke is three years old and has been blessed with an extra chromosome.&nbsp; I have wanted for so long to adopt a child with Down Syndrome, but God always had another precious little life for us instead.&nbsp; I have always rejoiced over His choices - but have secretly hoped that meant that we would adopt at least one more.&nbsp; </span></span>Brooke is at an amazing home, run by an American family.&nbsp; You will have to read their story <a href="http://www.loavesandfishesintl.com/aboutus.php" target="_blank">here</a>.&nbsp; It is pretty incredible.&nbsp; I am so thankful that this is where one of my daughters is - she is loved and well cared for as she waits.&nbsp; I am jealous that Handsome will have the chance to meet them when he and The Helper go on the pickup trip.&nbsp; I am going to find out from our agency if it would be acceptable to get in touch with them after we have received "PA".</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Precious, tiny Jillian has Apert Syndrome, just like Serenity.&nbsp; (Did I hear you squeal, Jessica Cooper?) She just turned a year old at the end of October.&nbsp; She is about the size of our 7 month old Little Man - who is not so "little" - so at least for now, it appears she is well taken care of.&nbsp; She is in a government run institution in the same general area as Brooke.&nbsp; The biggest difference (that we can tell) right now between she and Serenity is that Jillian's thumbs are also fused, giving her "rosebud" hands.&nbsp; This will give her very little ability to use her hands, unlike Serenity.&nbsp; I cannot wait to get her home and have Serenity's amazing team begin freeing her to thrive.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This was a long battle to come to the point of truly trusting we were hearing God's voice calling us.&nbsp; It seemed so crazy....but that story will have to wait for now.&nbsp; I will just praise Him for their beautiful lives.&nbsp; I will praise Him that <i>each</i> life matters.&nbsp; Even two tiny little girls tucked away in an enormous country, both abandoned at the gates of institutions.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We are trusting God to provide all that we will need - the strength, the courage, the ability, and the finances.&nbsp; We have a tax-deductible account with The Shepherd's Crook - another amazing ministry and family.&nbsp; If God should lead you to give, you can click <a href="http://www.theshepherdscrook.org/#!adoptions-in-process/c46d" target="_blank">here</a>.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">More than anything, we need your prayers.&nbsp; Please pray for the meeting on Monday with the social worker. We have truly loved each social worker that God has brought into our home.&nbsp; Pray for the medical reports to be done on Monday so we can move forward with that step.&nbsp; Pray for the "PA" to come back quickly.&nbsp; Pray for peace and patience as we wait.&nbsp; Pray for each day as we strive to fill our children's hearts and minds.&nbsp; Most of all, pray that God is always glorified.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Another adventure begun...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-67091702157740547272014-12-20T06:23:00.003-08:002014-12-20T06:23:58.370-08:00It is enough....For several weeks (well, maybe months), I have been mentally eying the date of December 13th.&nbsp; It was almost like a countdown in my head.&nbsp; It was coming....what did I have to show for it?&nbsp; December 13th was the one year anniversary of Serenity and Hope coming home.&nbsp; I simply cannot believe that a year <strike>is gone.</strike>&nbsp; No, I even need to rephrase that - a <i>year has gone by.&nbsp; </i>You see, as December 13th crept closer and closer, I began losing perspective of what God has done in this past year - it is not <i>gone</i>, it has been used completely and fully by God for His purposes.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">He brought home these two little ones:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-u9cTEhcE-QQ/VJV2IcD4W9I/AAAAAAAABJ4/UsT54GV-szY/s1600/Becca%2Bgirls.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-u9cTEhcE-QQ/VJV2IcD4W9I/AAAAAAAABJ4/UsT54GV-szY/s1600/Becca%2Bgirls.jpeg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">He brought this Little Man safely into our home:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BUUN87t-FPk/VJV238GAzHI/AAAAAAAABKA/P-Vweba8mVw/s1600/Speck11.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-BUUN87t-FPk/VJV238GAzHI/AAAAAAAABKA/P-Vweba8mVw/s1600/Speck11.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">He carried precious Grace through her hip surgery at the end of June</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ZdN_sblprOw/VJV4ZimSOpI/AAAAAAAABKM/zRi4RwdzLm0/s1600/YU%2B1Y%2BX.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ZdN_sblprOw/VJV4ZimSOpI/AAAAAAAABKM/zRi4RwdzLm0/s1600/YU%2B1Y%2BX.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">He provided what Serenity needed to thrive through the hands of doctors; air through a trach and the removal of pressure on her brain by a skull expansion....</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-szh8xCGdhB8/VJV4_lbrK4I/AAAAAAAABKU/fGZSWinV32E/s1600/s%2Bhospital.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-szh8xCGdhB8/VJV4_lbrK4I/AAAAAAAABKU/fGZSWinV32E/s1600/s%2Bhospital.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">And He brought her safely home again.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-jiaj9r7aTuw/VJV6K90_60I/AAAAAAAABKg/dRyFmc6-ZUg/s1600/Serenity%2BHome.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-jiaj9r7aTuw/VJV6K90_60I/AAAAAAAABKg/dRyFmc6-ZUg/s1600/Serenity%2BHome.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">To thrive...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6KBueERx5-0/VJV6kHEeAzI/AAAAAAAABKo/F5nJ3RcEUqI/s1600/Serenity%2BHome%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-6KBueERx5-0/VJV6kHEeAzI/AAAAAAAABKo/F5nJ3RcEUqI/s1600/Serenity%2BHome%2B2.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: left;">All the while He was doing this, He was providing for, nurturing, protecting, stretching, growing, blessing us.&nbsp; A million hallelujahs would never be enough.&nbsp; I simply cannot praise His Name enough for all He has done!&nbsp; He has <span style="color: blue;">redeemed<span style="color: #444444;"> me!&nbsp; To Him be all glory, honor, and praise.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-GoGFyjplFMU/VJV61NJDvDI/AAAAAAAABKw/6uG89jk0K58/s1600/Family%2Bpic%2BDec%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-GoGFyjplFMU/VJV61NJDvDI/AAAAAAAABKw/6uG89jk0K58/s1600/Family%2Bpic%2BDec%2B2014.JPG" height="258" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-16q3qNx2I5E/VJV66XPbOwI/AAAAAAAABK4/1FrkAxz8bDE/s1600/baseball7.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-16q3qNx2I5E/VJV66XPbOwI/AAAAAAAABK4/1FrkAxz8bDE/s1600/baseball7.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wNFYtlQAGhg/VJV6_l2JNQI/AAAAAAAABLA/GKf_mgTAv1Q/s1600/baseball13.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wNFYtlQAGhg/VJV6_l2JNQI/AAAAAAAABLA/GKf_mgTAv1Q/s1600/baseball13.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wr2xSFiX80Q/VJV7QC9Ff_I/AAAAAAAABLI/mVN5r5X4X88/s1600/Dec%2BA%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wr2xSFiX80Q/VJV7QC9Ff_I/AAAAAAAABLI/mVN5r5X4X88/s1600/Dec%2BA%2B2014.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PjxozjLfUQA/VJV7Wi17SCI/AAAAAAAABLQ/VBBLkf4dcS0/s1600/family%2Bjudge.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PjxozjLfUQA/VJV7Wi17SCI/AAAAAAAABLQ/VBBLkf4dcS0/s1600/family%2Bjudge.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iRSaiCQ_8dI/VJV7cWDME7I/AAAAAAAABLY/pIRsEUv_0tw/s1600/goat%2Bfun.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-iRSaiCQ_8dI/VJV7cWDME7I/AAAAAAAABLY/pIRsEUv_0tw/s1600/goat%2Bfun.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4wCBTiJCieU/VJV7juBzU1I/AAAAAAAABLg/hZiXPdikiog/s1600/Hope%2BHaircut.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4wCBTiJCieU/VJV7juBzU1I/AAAAAAAABLg/hZiXPdikiog/s1600/Hope%2BHaircut.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Z8uE869ReOY/VJV7povuxKI/AAAAAAAABLo/94J0o5htO3o/s1600/James%2Bbday%2B2013.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Z8uE869ReOY/VJV7povuxKI/AAAAAAAABLo/94J0o5htO3o/s1600/James%2Bbday%2B2013.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NiwFaY8d-9I/VJV77U2noGI/AAAAAAAABLw/xC5iMOZfvMM/s1600/mt.%2Brainier%2B2014%2B3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NiwFaY8d-9I/VJV77U2noGI/AAAAAAAABLw/xC5iMOZfvMM/s1600/mt.%2Brainier%2B2014%2B3.jpg" height="180" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xfxm8G96JK8/VJV8BGQU3zI/AAAAAAAABL4/wGtzpnz2zqs/s1600/mt.%2Brainier%2B2014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-xfxm8G96JK8/VJV8BGQU3zI/AAAAAAAABL4/wGtzpnz2zqs/s1600/mt.%2Brainier%2B2014.jpg" height="180" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-aXostGnRxCo/VJV8RPYZ1EI/AAAAAAAABMA/RgQ_RyHSMg0/s1600/YU%2Bmar%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-aXostGnRxCo/VJV8RPYZ1EI/AAAAAAAABMA/RgQ_RyHSMg0/s1600/YU%2Bmar%2B2.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And yet, I had lost sight of all of that.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I guess I didn't realize how much I was counting on posting the incredible changes in one little life a year after she was rescued from an earthly hell.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-S6m4wBeo8x8/VJV8_RvlVyI/AAAAAAAABMI/aABUcwJi4oU/s1600/Hope2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-S6m4wBeo8x8/VJV8_RvlVyI/AAAAAAAABMI/aABUcwJi4oU/s1600/Hope2.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I wanted to be able to "show" the world amazing transformation pictures.&nbsp; I wanted her to be walking and maybe beginning to talk or sign.&nbsp; Some families have truly incredible transformation stories.&nbsp; I love seeing and reading about them.&nbsp; I love praising Christ for what He has done!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And yet, my precious Hope....</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4L7DtLcgsMY/VJV9yvs2-WI/AAAAAAAABMQ/KLzX79l2Tbk/s1600/Hope%2B2%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4L7DtLcgsMY/VJV9yvs2-WI/AAAAAAAABMQ/KLzX79l2Tbk/s1600/Hope%2B2%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PkPZ6j16ID0/VJV93reg_5I/AAAAAAAABMY/HMJKTLD9QmY/s1600/Hope%2B4%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PkPZ6j16ID0/VJV93reg_5I/AAAAAAAABMY/HMJKTLD9QmY/s1600/Hope%2B4%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HUlSfChl_ws/VJV934Gi7pI/AAAAAAAABMc/N8tnoVwJDwk/s1600/Hope%2B4a%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-HUlSfChl_ws/VJV934Gi7pI/AAAAAAAABMc/N8tnoVwJDwk/s1600/Hope%2B4a%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--G6AEUhIgoM/VJV9-QmPYqI/AAAAAAAABMo/Ou9xlOMzBo8/s1600/hope%2B7%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--G6AEUhIgoM/VJV9-QmPYqI/AAAAAAAABMo/Ou9xlOMzBo8/s1600/hope%2B7%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FOkC29hWSo8/VJV9-o79vQI/AAAAAAAABMs/rUMaNr2B6YU/s1600/Hope%2B8%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FOkC29hWSo8/VJV9-o79vQI/AAAAAAAABMs/rUMaNr2B6YU/s1600/Hope%2B8%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PasXN5-hAYg/VJV-AVbZvyI/AAAAAAAABM4/vh3NZMudUbQ/s1600/Hope%2B9%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PasXN5-hAYg/VJV-AVbZvyI/AAAAAAAABM4/vh3NZMudUbQ/s1600/Hope%2B9%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We struggle to get a good picture of her.&nbsp; In most of the pictures above, she has the same scared look as in her profile picture.&nbsp; She is still on "hyper alert" all the time - every noise, every movement, every bit of life has her vigilant for her own safety. Anything new is a threat.&nbsp; Any change throws her back into chaos.&nbsp; Where is our amazing story?</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">It is there...it is just in the tiny details.&nbsp; The details that would not seem important or huge to anyone else.&nbsp; She is not screaming <i>every</i> night anymore.&nbsp; She does not lay on the floor like a limp rag.&nbsp; She is drinking independently from a cup now.&nbsp; She scootches on her bottom to get places close by.&nbsp; She can tolerate short trips to the store or church without too much fallout when we get home.&nbsp; She does smile at her family and get excited when they play with her.&nbsp;&nbsp;</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">It doesn't sound like much to you, does it?&nbsp; I understand.&nbsp;&nbsp;</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This was my struggle.&nbsp; I want so much for her!&nbsp; There is so much possibility - so much ability unused.&nbsp; There is so much awaiting for her!&nbsp; And yet, she is still trapped in her own little world.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I am pouring back through all my adoption materials and research.&nbsp; I am seeking out help from those that have "been there, done that" before me.&nbsp; Last night, God arranged for me to talk with the most amazing adoptive mom - one who has been in these trenches for a few years before us.&nbsp; She had so much to say that I needed to hear - so much direction and perspective.&nbsp; It was like God was pouring out healing balm on my soul! One of the many things that I pondered after we talked was that we are in a very small category when we adopt; an even smaller one when we adopt special needs as a large family; an even smaller one when we adopt special needs as a large family from a truly horrific institutional setting...and when we say that we have adopted special needs, as a large family, from a truly horrific institutional setting and her name is Hope - we are in a category by ourselves.&nbsp; There are no "experts" on Hope.&nbsp; There are people who can give direction and insight - but no one who knows what is a perfect solution for <i>Hope</i>.&nbsp; No one, except her Creator.&nbsp; <i>And He gave her to us.</i>&nbsp; He put her in our family by His beautiful, perfect plan.&nbsp; He knew what she needed, and it was us.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">So what does that mean to me?&nbsp; It means that where she is right now <i>is enough</i>.&nbsp; It is enough that she is safe and loved.&nbsp; She will never be hurt again.&nbsp; She will never be ignored and neglected again.&nbsp; She will never again feel her tummy hungry, she will never again feel her body dirty.&nbsp; She will never again be stuck in a crib all day with nothing.&nbsp; She will never again be touched by hands that do not love her.&nbsp; She will never again be ignored.&nbsp; She will never again cry without her mama's heart breaking for her.&nbsp; She will never again be alone but for her Father in heaven.&nbsp; She will never again be an orphan.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This is enough.&nbsp; It is <i>more</i> than enough.&nbsp; This is the beauty of adoption: that a child born of someone else, even in a different country, is placed in a family and is loved with a fierceness that only God in heaven can understand.&nbsp; That regardless of what she is or is not able to do - regardless of the damage done to her - regardless of whether that damage will ever be repaired - she is a beloved daughter who carries her father's name.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This <i>is </i>enough.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">This does not mean that I will not keep seeking direction and guidance for her well-being.&nbsp; It does not mean that I will stop crying out to my Savior for her.&nbsp; It does not mean that we will not continue to seek to help her grow and thrive.&nbsp; I am not giving up because she is my daughter!&nbsp; But it does mean that I will strive to never lose sight of the fact that she is safe.&nbsp; She is beloved.&nbsp; She is mine.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">It <i>is</i> enough.&nbsp; Praise to God that it is enough.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b4aV4GI4sg4/VJWFAB7gFMI/AAAAAAAABNI/fR1-g5VMS1I/s1600/hope%2Bser%2B12%2B2014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b4aV4GI4sg4/VJWFAB7gFMI/AAAAAAAABNI/fR1-g5VMS1I/s1600/hope%2Bser%2B12%2B2014.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">To Him be all glory, honor, and praise.</div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-19455573417184582912014-11-25T05:18:00.003-08:002014-11-25T05:19:48.040-08:00The most amazing man....Happy 20th Anniversary to the most amazing man in the world. Today I celebrate being married longer than not being married - quite a milestone. I love you now so much more than twenty years ago – and I was crazy in-love then. I have seen you grow and strengthen as you seek His face and carry our family. I have seen you soften and love so deeply it hurts as you take a new little life in your arms - or a life that has been discarded and abused by others. You hav<span class="text_exposed_show">e stuck by me in my hardest times – through my endless tears seventeen years ago over the empty nursery that we thought would never be filled and now through the craziness of a house full of blessed chaos, noise, laughter, needs, and treasures without measure. How I love you, my best friend. We would have never guessed where He would take us, we were so young - yet even with all He has blessed us with, you are still my greatest gift here on earth. May our Lord richly bless you for your sacrifices and love for us.</span><span class="text_exposed_show"></span><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1R-EIiF2ypY/VHSBkoNMbiI/AAAAAAAABJo/j4WhbBfVyok/s1600/Yu-Chi%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1R-EIiF2ypY/VHSBkoNMbiI/AAAAAAAABJo/j4WhbBfVyok/s1600/Yu-Chi%2B2.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-42857203149036332232014-11-24T14:04:00.000-08:002014-11-25T04:51:43.551-08:00Christmas cookies, anyone?<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: red;">SOLD - THANK YOU!</span></span> <br />I made two sets of felt Christmas cookies and mugs that I am selling to raise money for little Rudy on Reese's Rainbow.&nbsp; One set has two red mugs and one set has two green mugs.&nbsp; Each set is available for a $25 tax-deductible donation to his account at <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70513/rudy" target="_blank">http://reecesrainbow.org/70513/rudy</a> .&nbsp; Please leave me a comment if you are interested - the comment will not be published.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DatwVLYANeQ/VHOqozA1KMI/AAAAAAAABJI/gWIid5M__TM/s1600/cocoa%2Bpic%2B1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-DatwVLYANeQ/VHOqozA1KMI/AAAAAAAABJI/gWIid5M__TM/s1600/cocoa%2Bpic%2B1.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PBIb5gtCm-s/VHOqrqUasGI/AAAAAAAABJQ/wI064Ya16CE/s1600/cocoa%2Bpic%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PBIb5gtCm-s/VHOqrqUasGI/AAAAAAAABJQ/wI064Ya16CE/s1600/cocoa%2Bpic%2B2.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QMExpuTBrYw/VHOqubjyTwI/AAAAAAAABJY/Vd1TlnVlwo4/s1600/green%2Bcup.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-QMExpuTBrYw/VHOqubjyTwI/AAAAAAAABJY/Vd1TlnVlwo4/s1600/green%2Bcup.JPG" height="238" width="320" /></a></div>*The pattern was used according to the creators copyright description.&nbsp; Also, the marshmallows are pretty small - I can sew them to each other in a pile if you are worried about a choking hazard.<br /><br />Thank you!<br /><br />Please continue to pray for a family to find little Rudy - what a treasure!Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-38669821145666756342014-11-22T09:05:00.001-08:002014-11-22T09:09:00.855-08:00Praising God!<div style="text-align: center;">We are home!!!!&nbsp; We are home!!!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;">PRAISING THE LORD FOR HIS GOODNESS!</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">A post coming soon...but today, I am just going to hold my kiddos and rejoice.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;"></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Y-Y75PZFT8A/VHDCrzVpEEI/AAAAAAAABI4/lgaOhOttX8g/s1600/home%2Bser%2B2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;">- <img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Y-Y75PZFT8A/VHDCrzVpEEI/AAAAAAAABI4/lgaOhOttX8g/s1600/home%2Bser%2B2.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></span></span></div><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><br /><div style="text-align: center;">This was Serenity's nap time - The Helper just needed to be nice and close.&nbsp; I understand the feeling. :)</div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-64072651309259410872014-11-18T06:22:00.004-08:002014-11-18T06:22:42.813-08:00We are still here....I promise!It has been 3 crazy-busy weeks since Serenity's first surgery.....three long weeks.&nbsp; Honestly, it has gone much, much smoother than I anticipated.&nbsp; That is the benefit of planning for the worst scenarios - you end up most of the time with a pleasant surprise.&nbsp; Actually, it is a little hard to use the word "pleasant" when talking hospitals, etc., but you get the idea.<br /><br />Our anticipated going-home day is the 21st; so just a few more days. But this morning as I am tired and 1-hand typing as Little Man is already up, 3 more days feels like a long time!&nbsp; Here is a picture of my precious girl from last week:<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-seMKyjxj5hk/VGtNREdAbqI/AAAAAAAABIo/XmGgkLiapr8/s1600/ser%2Bhos.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-seMKyjxj5hk/VGtNREdAbqI/AAAAAAAABIo/XmGgkLiapr8/s1600/ser%2Bhos.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>This was before the skull surgery ("vault expansion") on Friday.&nbsp; For the surgery, they shaved a once inch strip from ear to ear over the top of her head, but they left the rest of her hair.&nbsp; I cannot tell you how much relief emotionally this is - something about having her shaved completely would have really crushed my heart.&nbsp; Now with some creative hair-dos or some big (soft) headbands, we should be able to hide the chevron shaped scar.&nbsp; When they do future surgeries, they will just keep coming back to that original place.&nbsp; Again, hard to describe the emotional relief in that.<br /><br />I would guess that most people would not be able to see differences in the skull/face, but they are amazing to us.&nbsp; Even though it was an expansion to the back of her head, it has relieved the pressure on her eyes and face, so everything looks less puffy and profound.&nbsp; In six months, they will do the front of her skull (not the mid-face).&nbsp; This will probably reshape her face in a much more distinct way.&nbsp; But I am not ready to think about another surgery yet.&nbsp; I have to keep reminding myself that future surgery stays will be measured in <i>days</i>, not <i>weeks</i>.&nbsp; This one was so long due to the trach placement.<br /><br />So how is the adjustment going to the trach?&nbsp; Ummmmm, Serenity has made it easy.&nbsp; One of the biggest things with the trachs is that they can get clogged very easily with the secretions from the lungs - which therefore blocks of the breathing - immediately a critical situation.&nbsp; Well, Serenity has such a hard, forceful cough, we are rarely having to suction her beyond "maintenance" cleaning.&nbsp; She also figured out how to "talk" around the trach within a week.&nbsp; This is amazing!&nbsp; It also gives a safety factor of her being able to communicate to us if something isn't quite right.&nbsp; Handsome and I are finishing up the last of six classes this morning on trach care/emergency care.&nbsp; It is a little scary, honestly.&nbsp; But I keep reminding myself that God was sovereign before the trach, and He is sovereign now.&nbsp; Serenity is never out of His Hand.&nbsp; There is great comfort in that.&nbsp; If I trust His plans are perfect - even when I don't understand them - then I can rest in His Hand.&nbsp; This does not mean that nothing bad will ever happen - and that the pain wouldn't be devastating - but it does mean that nothing will happen outside of His perfect plan.&nbsp; Ever.<br /><br />I had planned to update the blog every other day or so with new prayer requests and updates.&nbsp; But then real life got in the way.&nbsp; By the time I get home from the hospital and give everyone some lovin', I am so tired I just sit and hold someone until it is time to start the bedtime routine.&nbsp; When I get up in the morning, my time with my Savior takes precedence - and I need that time so desperately! - and then it is time to start the day rolling again.<br /><br />I am so humbled and grateful for all those that have helped us - my parents, Grammy Caroline, my sisters, Handsome's parents and those from church that have brought meals.&nbsp; It amazes me that so many people would give so much for my family.&nbsp; It is amazing too, how knowing that someone else is bringing dinner is such a relief.&nbsp; The very long drive home from the hospital saps the last of my energy.&nbsp; I have a huge amount of compassion now for those who have to commute in traffic every day.<br /><br />Today, a home care rep from the hospital is bringing all the supplies and machines we will need.&nbsp; I have found in the past that it is a little unnerving to see all this "hospital" equipment in my home.&nbsp; All of the sudden it makes things feel very critical and scary, even though it is all here to help us.&nbsp; I am trying to gear myself up for that.&nbsp; It will actually be nice to have a day or two to get everything arranged and in place before she is home - though I would prefer to have her home instead!<br /><br />I need to get the day rolling - but I know it is bad when The Testy Chef says, "Mom, you need to update your blog!".....Thank you for all the prayers and support, I can never tell you what it means to me.&nbsp; Please pray for peace and strength for these last few hospital days.&nbsp; Thursday and Friday will be a little more difficult as Grammy and my parents are flying out for much needed vacations.&nbsp; In God's grace, they were scheduled long before the surgeries - I know that they would have been cancelled otherwise.&nbsp; But it I see it as such a gift to them all after some busy, busy weeks.&nbsp; Pray for Serenity's peace.&nbsp; I am afraid that she thinks she has just been moved to a new orphanage.&nbsp; On Saturday, we did see her dealing with some depression, poor baby!&nbsp; Yesterday, we finally got the "okay" to take her anywhere in the hospital, so The Helper and I took her to the cafeteria.&nbsp; She was so excited!&nbsp; We will do the same today after the last training.<br /><br />I am anticipating a wonderful Friday night with us all home together again!&nbsp; Handsome has spent almost every night at the hospital - what an amazing, wonderful man I have been given! - and if he is home, I am at the hospital....just need us all together again.&nbsp; I have told the kids that Saturday is just a "jammie" day.&nbsp; They looked at me like I had finally lost my sanity - I am never up for just a "jammie" day...but it has been a <i>long</i> three weeks!<br /><br />May everything be to His glory!<br /><br />Until He comes...<br /><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-39724930589042316482014-11-09T15:47:00.001-08:002014-11-09T15:47:19.878-08:00Quick update....Just have time for a quick update.&nbsp; Serenity's vault expansion (adding to the back of her skull) went very, very well.&nbsp; The doctors seemed very pleased.&nbsp; They said that she will need surgery to the front of her skull (not the face) in about six months.&nbsp;<br /><br />So now they are trying to work her slowly of her pain and sedation medications.&nbsp; She is really having a tough time with this, plus lots of vomiting from having that area of her body operated on.&nbsp; She is not really eating.&nbsp; Worse still, she is not drinking.&nbsp; She has to have thickened liquids due to the trach and she is NOT happy about it.&nbsp; This morning she was simply refusing to drink. :(<br /><br />Please pray for her comfort, for smooth easing off the medications, and that she will eat and drink.&nbsp; All of this is critical to her moving closer to coming home.&nbsp; Pray also for Handsome and I as we have 3 days of training this week - as long as Serenity is out of the ICU.&nbsp; Please be praying these are not delayed.<br /><br />Loving this sweet girl and wanting her home!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-036puJ7kahw/VF_88HlkG7I/AAAAAAAABH0/lowpAUG-RZ4/s1600/ser%2Bhospital.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-036puJ7kahw/VF_88HlkG7I/AAAAAAAABH0/lowpAUG-RZ4/s1600/ser%2Bhospital.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-13470213780681532012014-11-01T06:35:00.000-07:002014-11-01T06:35:47.927-07:00The Update...And Litte RudyI really meant to get a post up before Serenity's surgery, but the time was just not there.&nbsp; So here is the update....<br /><br />Serenity had her trach placed on Tuesday.&nbsp; The surgery went very smoothly - Praise God!&nbsp; But, we were told she would be in a medically-induced coma for at least 4-5 days.&nbsp; It turns out that this is a very delicate balancing act - they don't want her completely out, but they don't want her wiggling around.&nbsp; Hmmmm, how do you do that with a human-dynamo?&nbsp; They are also having to have her in arm restraints (nice, soft bracelets around her wrists, tied to the bed) to keep her from pulling it out - or the NG tube through her nose.<br /><br />I am just worn down emotionally right now...so hard to get the words to come but this is just HARD.&nbsp; She is miserable....completely miserable.&nbsp; The hardest thing for her is that she can't talk or make any sounds.&nbsp; I have been told that this may come eventually - either from her figuring out how to talk "around" the trach or with a "speaking valve" with the trach.&nbsp; But for now, nothing comes and it is scaring and frustrating her.&nbsp; There is no way to really communicate to her what has happened, so it breaks my heart.&nbsp; Also, being the human dynamo, she HATES being restrained.&nbsp; She probably has quite a bit of pain around the incision, but it is so hard to know with her what is pain and what is frustration.<br /><br />Just pray for my little girl - this is so hard.&nbsp; I could type out in detail all she is going through - but I just don't have the energy today.<br /><br />We were able to get a meeting with "Home Care" that will train us to take care of the trach.&nbsp; I keep pushing - to the point of being amazingly annoying, I am sure - that we have to be ready to take her home as soon as possible.&nbsp; Those that remember her buzzing around the ICU at top speed know exactly what I am saying - but there are so many different nurses and doctors, not everyone knows my little firecracker yet.&nbsp; We need essentially 12 hours worth of "training" - but they only usually do 2 trainings a week.&nbsp; WHAT?&nbsp; We are not staying in the hospital 3 weeks just waiting for "training".&nbsp; My understand is - and no one has really contradicted me - that she will be ready to be home within a week of the cranio vault expansion surgery on Friday....but most kids stay in the hospital for weeks waiting for the caregivers to be trained and to get a home nurse assigned.&nbsp; WHAT?&nbsp; WHAT?&nbsp; I just can't wrap my head around that.&nbsp; We are not going to have a home nurse if I am able to do all her care myself - and we need to get this training done!!!&nbsp; Right now, after talking with them a great deal, there is the <i>potential</i> of being able to get home sometime around the 14th if everything goes smoothly.&nbsp; Oh, how I am praying for this!&nbsp; She NEEDS to be home, we need to be able to be with her - the drive there is so long in traffic and it is very difficult to balance all the needs around us.<br /><br />Yet, even through the difficulty - I am praising God that she is <i>here.</i>&nbsp; She is in a place that can do these amazing things for her health.&nbsp; A place that she can live life to the fullest.&nbsp; This is Handsome and my calling, our ministry.&nbsp; She is not sitting in an orphanage slowly dying and becoming more and more incapacitated.&nbsp; This gives me great peace and great strength.<br /><br />Please keep praying for Serenity's peace and comfort - as well as all the details to getting her home.&nbsp; The next surgery is Nov 7th.&nbsp; So close, yet so far away! <br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><u><span style="font-size: large;">LITTLE RUDY</span></u></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4hsU2rD5ZPY/VFTfk51HaRI/AAAAAAAABHU/udCb-Cb97aA/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-4hsU2rD5ZPY/VFTfk51HaRI/AAAAAAAABHU/udCb-Cb97aA/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We are this little man's Angel Tree Warriors.&nbsp; He has caught the hearts of several of my kiddos, so we are praying and doing what we can to find him a family.&nbsp; The goal of the Angel Tree through <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/" target="_blank">Reese's Rainbow</a> is to raise $1000 toward his account.&nbsp; Honestly, without God's grace, I don't see that happening - but the other goal is that we get his precious little face seen.&nbsp; My prayer is that you see him and his little face stays in your mind - that you would pray for him every time you think of him.&nbsp; Pray for a family to choose him though there is nothing "special" to his picture and his story on the surface.&nbsp; But he is a <i>real</i> child - just as real as your favorite child in your life.&nbsp; He needs a mommy and daddy.&nbsp; We have seen the profound impact of not having a family in both Serenity and Hope.&nbsp; Please print out his <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70513/rudy" target="_blank">picture</a> and pray for him!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">If God leads you to donate, the link is <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70513/rudy" target="_blank">here</a>.&nbsp; I see the $1000 as his plane ticket home - but more importantly, I want him to have a family!</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Until He comes.....</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-71005353213655737092014-10-07T20:36:00.000-07:002014-10-07T20:36:01.532-07:00The days are racing by...I can't believe it has been over two months from my last update!&nbsp; Time is just racing by...<br /><br />Where to even start?<br /><br />Serenity....I think this girl is giving the medical community gray hairs!&nbsp; After the stay in the hospital, the bad oxygen rates, etc., it was decided that a sleep study had to be done to help prioritize what needed to be done first on her huge list of medical to-dos.&nbsp; Wow...the results were pretty conclusive.&nbsp; She stops breathing 94 times <i>per hour</i>.&nbsp; I cannot even wrap my head around this.&nbsp; I know how hard she struggles to breathe all night long, but WOW!<br /><br />This led to the trach being now the <i>only</i> thing left on the table of options....but then that set off a whole new struggle to determine what and when.&nbsp;&nbsp; Then, as all of that was being discussed in the medical "round table" of experts, we went to the optomologist.&nbsp; I need to stop thinking that anything will be simple and easy with my little pixy-girl.&nbsp; They found that the pressure of the skull on the brain is causing a massive amount of pressure on her optic nerves - which will lead to blindness if left untreated.&nbsp;&nbsp; Oh, and she has horrific vision on top of that!<br /><br />That result caused the situation to go from serious to critical.&nbsp; But it still was a can of worms as to what to work on.&nbsp; It turns out that if a child has been oxygen deprived, as Serenity has at night, when they "fix" that (through the trach), it can cause the brain to swell....and she has no room for that to happen.&nbsp; So, to make a long medical go-around short, it has been decided to do the trach AND the skull expansion at the same time.&nbsp; WOW, again.<br /><br />The surgery was put on the fast track and we were scheduled for October 1st.&nbsp; I was still trying to grasp hold of the situation emotionally....but then Serenity got a really bad cough/cold/runny nose and that was the end of the Oct 1st date!&nbsp; Now it has been rescheduled for Nov 7th - a much harder time of the year for us.&nbsp; This is planned to be a 4-5 week stay in the hospital - so <i>after </i>Thanksgiving.&nbsp; Ugh.&nbsp; Handsome is in the retail world, so that is really tough timing.&nbsp; But we always come back to God being Sovereign.&nbsp; This is all within His perfect plan.&nbsp; The plan may include stretching our faith and our family ~ but in the end there will be glory to His Name.<br /><br />So emotionally, where am I with all of this?&nbsp; That is probably more complicated than the doctors trying to come up with a good plan of treatment.&nbsp; I want her to be healthy and free of the struggles to breathe and the pressure on her brain!&nbsp; I want to see how her life will change - dramatically or not?&nbsp; I want her to grow and thrive and enjoy life.&nbsp; But a trach?&nbsp; Ugh, that hurts the heart.&nbsp; Something else to mark her as "different".&nbsp; It will also most likely change or completely take away her precious little voice.&nbsp; We were told that some kids learn to speak "around" the trach (with a trach, the air doesn't reach the vocal cords, so there is no sound) but it is a very different sound.&nbsp; Some kids can learn to function with a speaking valve - one that only lets air in, and not out, so the air does have to move past the vocal chords.&nbsp; But only some kids can handle this and it still changes their voice.&nbsp; Serenity has the sweetest little "HI!"....well, not "little", she is VERY loud...but it is precious.&nbsp; It is hard to think of that being gone.&nbsp; Right now, the doctors are saying she will have the trach for at least 3-4 years, until they do the mid-face expansion several years from now.&nbsp; I haven't thought as much about the skull expansion ...other than I am very happy the will <i>not</i> shave her head.&nbsp; They will just shave a small strip that can be covered up the the other longer hair,&nbsp; I am so thankful for that.<br /><br />While all of the coordinating for the surgeries is going on, Serenity failed another hearing test.&nbsp; Oh, my goodness!&nbsp; The poor girl!&nbsp; So among all the other things, she needs to be put to sleep and have a thorough hearing test done via brain probe.&nbsp; This will tell them what type of hearing aid that she will need.&nbsp; So many, many things!<br /><br />But I am so grateful she is <i>here</i>! I am so thankful that the doctors can fix each thing one by one.&nbsp; I praise God with an overflowing heart full of thanks.&nbsp; What will life be like for her without the constant pressure on the brain?&nbsp; When she can see with glasses and hear with hearing aids?&nbsp; When she can breathe and sleep soundly?&nbsp; She can do so much even with such huge limitations...my kids laugh that she will have super powers by the time they are done!<br /><br />So please pray with me for Serenity.&nbsp; Please pray for health before the surgery and for skill for the surgeons.&nbsp; Pray for peace and comfort for her as there is really no way to explain any of this in a way she would understand.&nbsp; Pray for Handsome and I as we try to balance all that needs to be done.&nbsp; Pray I can learn to care for the trach quickly so she can come home faster.&nbsp; Pray, pray, pray!<br /><br />Hmmm...what about everyone else?&nbsp; Those who are schooling are moving along in their studies.&nbsp; My mom is keeping Smiley, The Prince, The Professor, Romeo, and Snip very busy.&nbsp; The oldest, The Helper, The Warrior, and The Testy Chef are busy with online classes.&nbsp; The Boss and I are working on preschool.&nbsp;<br /><br />Grace is recovering well from her hip surgery.&nbsp; She had another round of Botox to release her tight muscles today - looking forward to some good months of stretching her muscles.&nbsp; We are still praying that her scoliosis is holding steady and not getting worse.<br /><br />Hope...my dear girl.&nbsp; We had a really, really tough stretch where she completely reverted back to where she was at when we got her from the orphanage.&nbsp; She stopped moving completely and was continually hitting her head with her fists and her toys.&nbsp; It was really, really hard - and honestly, frustrating.&nbsp; I don't know what brought it on.&nbsp; Thankfully, we have now come out of it again after about 8 weeks or so.&nbsp; She is scooting on her bottom again and interacting with toys.&nbsp; She still has such a long way to go...but again, I am just thankful she is here.&nbsp; That I can hold her close and dream big things for her.&nbsp; I can praise God for her and pray He heals her in His perfect plan.<br /><br />My time is gone again (as Mimi is trying to suck on the computer).&nbsp; Before I go though, I want to introduce you to little Rudy:<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nl3tHGW8G0o/VDStjRuP4kI/AAAAAAAABGw/jEYRSCX9EdE/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nl3tHGW8G0o/VDStjRuP4kI/AAAAAAAABGw/jEYRSCX9EdE/s1600/rudy%2B1%2Bchina.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KoupB5shSqg/VDStlD8ebnI/AAAAAAAABG4/aTTQH-MZrDY/s1600/Rudy%2B2%2Bchina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KoupB5shSqg/VDStlD8ebnI/AAAAAAAABG4/aTTQH-MZrDY/s1600/Rudy%2B2%2Bchina.jpg" /></a></div>This little pumpkin is in a large Asian country.&nbsp; He is 3 years old and has Down Syndrome.&nbsp; He has captured two of my kids' hearts.&nbsp; Snip and The Professor pray for him and donate to his account through Reese's Rainbow.&nbsp; In fact, the entire $53 in his account is all from the two of them.&nbsp; I am not sure what about him has drawn them - so I am assuming it is the Lord touching them for some reason that I cannot see yet.<br /><br />Every year, Reese's Rainbow does an "Angel Tree" - encouraging people to donate to the accounts of little ones with Down Syndrome.&nbsp; The money in the accounts are given to the families that choose to adopt them.&nbsp; An average adoption costs $26K - $30K - this is a lot of money for just about anyone.&nbsp; Because my kids love little "Rudy" so much, we have signed up to be his Angel Tree Warriors.&nbsp; We will work to raise $1000 in donations between November 1st and Dec 31st.&nbsp; But more than money, I want to encourage people to pray for him.&nbsp; Pray that a family sees him and falls in love - that they are willing to do whatever necessary to <span style="color: blue;">redeem<span style="color: #444444;"> this little boy - to give him a hope, a future, and a family.&nbsp; Pray big things for this precious little man....</span></span><br /><br /><span style="color: blue;"><span style="color: #444444;">Until He comes ~ we will praise Him. </span></span><br /><br /><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-11837357716217524212014-08-02T06:59:00.003-07:002014-08-02T06:59:28.271-07:00Prayers, please...and a Serenity update.Please pray for my dear friend Susanna from <a href="http://theblessingofverity.com/2014/07/with-hearts-that-are-breaking/" target="_blank">The Blessing of Verity</a>.&nbsp; This precious woman and family have been one of the two top inspirations for me through the last few years as God has called us into the world of special needs adoptions.&nbsp; I cried and prayed and cried and prayed with her for little Tommy with the million dollar smile to be adopted.&nbsp; God, in His wonderful grace, provided for Susanna and her family to be the ones to rescue him.&nbsp; She was so in love with this little man - it was amazing to behold.&nbsp; Two days ago, God called little Tommy home to Him, a little over a year after he came home to Susanna.&nbsp; I don't have any details other than it was an accidental drowning and that Susanna is blaming herself, though those involved say it was just a tragic accident.&nbsp;<br /><br />I cannot even imagine the grief and pain.&nbsp; This is a road that every parent prays they never have to walk.&nbsp; Please lift her up in your prayers over the next weeks and months.&nbsp; That our precious Savior would carry her and her family through this time of unimaginable grief.&nbsp; I trust with everything I am that God is sovereign and has a perfect plan ~ it is just hard to understand at the moment.&nbsp; But just because I cannot understand, does not mean that it is not true.&nbsp; Oh, sweet Savior, please carry my precious friend.<br /><br />It is hard to move on to a Serenity update when I just want to grieve for my friend, but I don't know when I will get another chance for a bit....<br /><br />Serenity's surgery was on July 25th.&nbsp; She came through the surgery very well though there was some concern during the surgery about her breathing.&nbsp; Everything appeared to be just fine that afternoon, so Handsome and I were fully expecting that she would come home the next day.&nbsp; Ummm, no.&nbsp; This was the first time that Serenity had been hooked up to oxygen monitors while sleeping at night.&nbsp; We knew she had sleep apnea - thus the reason for the surgery - but we just didn't realize how bad it was.&nbsp; In general, healthy people have an oxygen reading of 95-100 while sleeping.&nbsp; When we brought Romeo home from Guatemala years ago, the hospital staff <i>freaked out</i> that his numbers hit 82 occasionally.&nbsp; The removal of his tonsils and adenoids ended the 2 month long search for what was wrong with him health-wise.&nbsp;&nbsp; So we have some knowledge/experience in this area.&nbsp; But even with Serenity's tonsils and adenoids out, she was in the low 80s, dropping into the 70s.&nbsp; This was not what was expected!&nbsp;<br /><br />This lead to a holding pattern at the hospital - they wouldn't let her come home because of the numbers during the night were so bad...but they didn't know what to do to improve the numbers...so just endless hours turning into days of waiting.&nbsp; On Sunday, it was proposed that she have a trach tube installed.&nbsp; I think that was the moment I finally understood how critical this all was - not just urgent, but <i>critical</i>.&nbsp; We obviously have been-there-done-that on a lot of medical issues, but it still doesn't make it easy to dive in happily to such a huge event.&nbsp; Thankfully, I am in touch online with many moms with different medical experiences.&nbsp; They were able to tell me that it would be much like the g-tube; scary at first, but doable.&nbsp;<br /><br />But this set up a whole new set of circumstances - mainly how to cover work for Handsome during a long hospital stay.&nbsp; Just as we got the "troop movements" put in place (as all the planning here is called), the doctors on Monday afternoon took the trach back off the table and sent her home with oxygen and monitors while they came up with a plan.&nbsp; Relief....temporarily.<br /><br />Deep sigh...more medical equipment and monitors.&nbsp; I was pretty surprised at my dread of another medical adventure, as this is exactly what we knew we were getting into.&nbsp; I guess even when the head and heart are right, the emotions can be very hard to combat.&nbsp; The first two nights were really bad.&nbsp; I was up at least 11-12 times each night.&nbsp; The first night was all due to the sensor coming off her finger.&nbsp; So, I had to get up and replace it and then the machine would reset.&nbsp; The second night was a combination of the sensor coming off and her oxygen dropping below the 82 mark - one time even down to 69!&nbsp; This is brain-damage territory - really not good.&nbsp; The last two nights were much better.&nbsp; In fact, last night it didn't go off at all!&nbsp; But I know from experience that this is just the beginning of a very, very long journey.<br /><br />This was emphasized by several phone conversations I had with several doctors.&nbsp; There are a great deal of conversations/meetings going on in the background of what to do next.&nbsp; The main doctor does not want to attempt anymore surgeries (the oxygen concerns are the same for surgeries as they are for sleeping) until her airway is more "secure"....but they don't know how to secure it without surgery...and round and round it goes.&nbsp;&nbsp; The next step is an official sleep study done at the first part of September and then conversations/decisions from there.&nbsp;<br /><br />I think it is hard to wrap our heads around how serious this is because she is so healthy during the day.&nbsp; In fact, the doctor said, "We are just in amazement that she can be so healthy and happy during the day with such low oxygen numbers at night."&nbsp; Hmmmm.&nbsp;<br /><br />I know that the plan includes a surgery in 3-4 years that pulls the front part of her face forward.&nbsp; This is major, major surgery - like halos and facial braces holding the front of the face out, etc.&nbsp; (With kiddos with Aperts, the front triangle, including the nose, does not grow at the same rate as the rest of the face, causing this area to "sink" into the face.)&nbsp; This surgery will help pull out the area around the airway, hopefully eliminating the breathing issue.&nbsp; If they do this surgery too soon though, they will have to repeat it in her early teens.&nbsp; Oh, no!&nbsp;&nbsp; However, if they cannot come up with another way to ease the problem, this is exactly what they will need to do.&nbsp; BUT this leads back to the airway needing to be secured, especially for such a massive surgery - which puts the trach tube back on the table.&nbsp; Oh how my mama's heart hurts!<br /><br />As always this time of year, my thoughts and prayers are full of what we need to do/change/adjust/expect for the next year to begin.&nbsp; (Our lives do revolve more on the school year than the calendar year)&nbsp; I am trying to assess what the issues with Serenity will mean and how to plan for it.&nbsp; This includes new sleeping arrangements so she is with me and I can take care of the monitors...which means Hope needs to be moved.&nbsp; She has been with me because she still fusses a great deal some nights.&nbsp; It is very much like a chain reaction in the effects.&nbsp; One of the things I have noticed with the very large family is that many things that seem "small" in comparison can throw off the smooth (or relatively smooth) system we have in place.<br /><br />I need to get the morning rolling as we have a birthday party for our summer birthdays tomorrow...which means making cakes and cleaning today.&nbsp; I love having company but the preparation ahead of time is really difficult.&nbsp; We live in <i>every</i> inch of our house...so it isn't like we can clean it once and be done.&nbsp; We need to "major" clean it and then keep updating the cleaning until the company gets here.&nbsp; Sounds tiring, doesn't it?<br /><br />Please pray for Susanna.&nbsp;&nbsp; I cannot imagine....Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-66435238634476304072014-07-25T07:18:00.001-07:002014-07-25T07:18:07.986-07:00Breathing....First, I want to start off by thanking all of you that are praying for us.&nbsp; There are some days that I just know that God's grace is being poured out in abundance upon us.&nbsp; He promises to hear our prayers and to carry us - our life is a living example of that!&nbsp; It touches my heart to know that people with their own busy lives, with their own praises and requests, their own needs, take the time to lift us up as well.&nbsp; I cannot express what an encouragement that is to me.<br /><br />This morning, Serenity goes in for her tonsils/adenoids removed and tubes placed in her ears.&nbsp; This is normally an "easy" surgery.&nbsp; However, given her special needs - including her personality!!! - we are not sure what to expect.&nbsp; The doctors are also taking special precautions.&nbsp; She will be staying overnight at least tonight and possibly tomorrow night.&nbsp; In addition, the doctor reserved an ICU bed for her "just in case".&nbsp; That makes my heart tremble just a bit, honestly!&nbsp; Knowing our little firecracker, she will either be wanting to run around right after surgery or she will be testing our faith with complications - either way, we will need your prayers and His grace!&nbsp;<br /><br />Handsome will be the one staying with her.&nbsp; I still struggle with the change in our roles a bit.&nbsp; I can truly see that I need to be the one at home, especially with Little Man's arrival.&nbsp; But it is hard to kiss my girls goodbye as Daddy takes them away to the hospital.&nbsp; I am so thankful for God's provision on this, but it tests me in a whole new way!<br /><br />Grace is doing so very well recovering from her surgery!&nbsp; Her spica cast is beginning to really smell though, despite our best efforts.&nbsp; She is scheduled to get it off in about 3 weeks.&nbsp; We had a heat wave here just after she got it on.&nbsp; Once again, God had arranged provision way ahead of our need.&nbsp; When we moved into our home over a year ago, we had to replace the furnace.&nbsp; Given where we are and the lack of gas lines, a heat pump was the best option.&nbsp; It automatically comes with air conditioning.&nbsp; I told Handsome at the time that there was <i>no</i> way we were going to spend the money to run the air conditioning given that our area only gets a heat wave about once a year!&nbsp; I should have known as soon as I said that!&nbsp; So fast-forward a year and I am so thankful for God's provision for Grace's comfort.&nbsp; It looks like this week may be hot as well, so I will thank Him for the cool air and trust for the provision to pay for it.&nbsp; (Then, I will go back to our "no AC" vow. ;-) )<br /><br />Grace continues to be such a joy in our life.&nbsp; She is Handsome's reward at the end of a long day.&nbsp; He still cuddles with her every night as the day winds down and scoops her up every morning as the day begins.&nbsp; I am amazed at the Lord's gracious gift to my hard working husband.&nbsp; He fiercely loves all his children and each one has their own niche in his life, but Grace is his peace right now.&nbsp; What a precious thing.<br /><br />As for life in the rest of the family?&nbsp; It is a busy summer.&nbsp; I am learning in yet another way, to let go of self and rejoice for others.&nbsp; I don't like "busy" - I want a "quiet" calendar.&nbsp; But I have realized again, that is not necessarily what my kids want.&nbsp; They want to be seeing friends and going places - to enjoy their break from school to the fullest.&nbsp; I also have to remember that even though each mark on the calendar means I am busy, it doesn't mean each child is busy.&nbsp; Today may be the "Big 3" busy with youth group, but the younger ones are at home.&nbsp; Tomorrow it may be four doing things, but the others are not, etc. <br /><br />Even though it is busy, it is a little hard to believe that the summer is almost gone.&nbsp; I tell Handsome that I feel like on May 31st, we are at the top of the slide and then "zoom"....we are at the bottom of the slide and it is time to start school again!&nbsp; Once again, it is so true for another year.&nbsp; I am seeing the end of summer quickly arriving.&nbsp; I have to laugh once again at all my big plans for this summer.&nbsp; As the summer closed last year, I was determined that this summer I would finish painting the house and garage, have a garden going, and work on at least several areas of our overgrown, wild yard.&nbsp; (We are now on 5 acres - what a gift - but Handsome and I laugh that it feels like a half an acre due to the the overgrown blackberry bushes everywhere!)&nbsp; I certainly didn't picture that I would be bouncing a cranky baby and dealing with multiple surgeries!&nbsp; I, of course, had planned for spaced out surgeries - not bunching them altogether due to a pregnancy!&nbsp; God's plans were obviously different - and I praise Him for that.&nbsp; So we will survive another year with one side of the house a different color....and blackberry brambles still taking over.&nbsp; I finally picked one 10 X 15 area that I <i>will</i> get landscape fabric and bark on, just for my own sanity.&nbsp; (But right now, all the supplies are stacked up and waiting....hopefully they won't still be mocking me as we start school on August 25th!)<br /><br />I am starting to feel like I can breathe again.&nbsp; I find that with each new baby or adoption.&nbsp; There is a "fog" that surrounds the first two months of each new addition.&nbsp; I don't see it at the time - in fact, I would insist that it wasn't there at the time!&nbsp; But then as we pass the two month mark, I do realize that in a way, we were in survival mode and now we are finally getting into the new "normal."&nbsp; We were given a really nice baby swing to use by some friends and it has made a world of difference.&nbsp; I am able to snuggle him in and have a small period of time in which I am free to tackle the dishes, laundry, or paperwork pile....or just snuggle another precious little person.&nbsp;<br /><br />However, there is a cost.&nbsp; If he sleeps well in the swing, he doesn't sleep well at night.&nbsp; So then the endless debate begins - stuff done during the day or sleep at night?&nbsp; It really should be an easy answer, right?&nbsp; I think that if I could count on getting a good 4-5 hour stretch of sleep, it would be an easy answer...but so many nights, there are repeated needs of kiddos...so it makes for lots of "cat naps" but not real, restful sleep.&nbsp; (I can hear an "amen" from some of my friends!)&nbsp; So every morning, I think that it is more important to have the freedom during the day to get things done, but then by 4 in the afternoon, I am longing for sleep instead.&nbsp; And not just that "boy, a rest would be nice" but the "I am feeling nauseous because I am so tired" type thing.&nbsp; Once again, I need to be trusting that my Savior will provide for all I need...even sleep.<br /><br />So as I pray for the days ahead asking my Savior what my priorities and goals should be, one of the things I have realized is that my three girls - Serenity, Hope, and Mimi - have hit their "happy" place...and this is not necessarily a good thing.&nbsp; They are more than happy in what they can do and aren't seeing the need to do more.&nbsp; For example, Hope is safe, well fed, and slightly mobile.&nbsp; All the basic needs that were denied for 5 1/2 years are now met and she doesn't see the need for more.&nbsp; So most days as we put her on the floor, she will pick one toy or thing, scootch to it on her bottom, and then "pick" at it the rest of the day.&nbsp; If we move her away to something else, she will just wait until we look elsewhere and will move right back and begin "picking" again.&nbsp; Her therapist is really working on teaching her to walk, but like Mimi, she really isn't interested.&nbsp; <br /><br />So, I am praying for ideas and opportunities to press each of my precious girls forward in their development.&nbsp; There are endless ideas and resources out there, but I know from experience it is very easy to plan and even to buy things, but the implementation is the key.&nbsp; And that depends on so many things that are outside of my control - like others' needs, bad attitudes, paperwork/medical issues that need to be taken care of, etc.&nbsp; If you are praying for us, will you lift this up as well?&nbsp;<br /><br />For Serenity, my focus at the beginning will be communication (either speech or sign language) and more directed play.&nbsp; Not just wandering from one mess she makes to another.&nbsp; She still doesn't play with toys and probably won't if she doesn't learn "how" to, beyond throwing them or putting them in her mouth.&nbsp;<br /><br />For Hope, both moving and communication are on the list.&nbsp; Specifically walking or walking in a gait trainer.&nbsp; The communication is much more difficult.&nbsp; She doesn't even grasp the concept of communication being interactive.&nbsp; Having Little Man, I am more painfully aware every day of what she has been denied.&nbsp; He cries and someone picks him up and soothes him. He coos and someone coos back.&nbsp; He smiles and gets smiles in return.&nbsp; He knows already that if he does something, something will happen in return.&nbsp; Hope has <i>never</i> had that.&nbsp; As a baby, no one came when she cried.&nbsp; No one answered back when she cooed.&nbsp; No one returned a smile.&nbsp; No one "talked" with her.&nbsp; It is amazing at the hole this has left in her life.&nbsp; It almost wires things "backwards".&nbsp; Now when she cries and we try to respond as we would any of our other children, it does not soothe her, it winds her up more.&nbsp; When she cries or fusses and we talk gently to her or try to rub her back or soothe her, she screams and pulls away - or she just ignores us.&nbsp; This does not mean that we will stop, but it does make it harder.&nbsp; Again, God is showing me the damage that has been done.&nbsp; If it is harder for me to want to soothe her when she doesn't respond or responds negatively - and I <i>know</i> why and I <i>know</i> she needs it anyway - how much harder is it for her to understand how to interact when all she has been given is negative responses?&nbsp; We have to begin at the beginning again - but with a child in which all the natural desires to interact (such as with Little Man) have disappeared or have been warped into something to fight against.&nbsp; It hurts my heart to even think about.&nbsp;<br /><br />For Mimi, the goal is also communication and mobility- but again, her little life stands in stark contrast with Hope.&nbsp; Mimi, without miraculous healing by our Savior, does not have the potential that Hope does to communicate.&nbsp; Cognitively, she is just not able to.&nbsp; However, because she had a family from the very beginning, her little life is so different!&nbsp; I was determined from those first days that she needed to always be with me - always seeing my face and hearing my voice.&nbsp; So even though she is not able to communicate with sign language or words, she knows if she cries that we will respond.&nbsp; She knows that her laugh will make others laugh.&nbsp; She knows that her facial expressions trigger a reaction.&nbsp; The difference is almost beyond description.&nbsp; Even though I don't think she will truly have language skills, I still want to fill her time with practice of these things.&nbsp; The biggest challenge with Mimi is that she does not "mimic".&nbsp; So if I say "Dada", she will not even try to repeat it.&nbsp; If I do a motion with my hands, it is not repeated.&nbsp; If you really think about it, it takes away the starting block for building any communication.&nbsp; Our only option is to use things she already does and try to turn that into a language of sorts.&nbsp; For example, when she was pretty tiny, I am thinking around a year old, she began to purposely "blink" at me.&nbsp; I immediately began to blink back at her.&nbsp; It became a game that she still plays to this day.&nbsp; Eventually it has gotten to the point that if I blink first, she will blink back at me.&nbsp; But this is has taken many, many years of playing this game.&nbsp; Rereading what I just wrote makes it sound as if she doesn't interact with us, but that is really not the case either.&nbsp; She is very interactive and loves people.&nbsp; She will crawl over to us and pull up to a stand and growl at us until we pick her up.&nbsp; If she wants someone to turn on the TV (she loves music videos), she crawls over and makes a specific sound until we come.&nbsp; But I can probably count on one hand these type of specific communications.&nbsp; She "talks" to us all the time, but it is in her own delightful way and on a very limited level.&nbsp; I know this is a hard thing to grasp if you don't have a child like this, but I saw it summed up on day on a poster.&nbsp; It said, "They say you will never talk, but as your mommy, I hear you "speak" every day."&nbsp; This is so very, very true.<br /><br />My time is gone this morning as the sun is fully up and the house begins to stir.&nbsp; I will continue breathing and praying and praising God even as I am counting the benefits versus the drawbacks of drinking another cup of coffee this morning.&nbsp; He is so good.&nbsp; Even when life is hard, He is good.&nbsp; Maybe I should say <i>especially</i> when life is so hard, He is so good.<br /><br />Here are a couple of pictures to tide you all over until I can get more of the rest of the gang...I am limited right now to the pictures the kids take of each other and baby - so needless to say, most of them aren't posted publicly because of the crazy poses and angles! :)<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-f4u7E2JwgFA/U9JkIb0luNI/AAAAAAAABGQ/gRWkWhUK3FI/s1600/jer10.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-f4u7E2JwgFA/U9JkIb0luNI/AAAAAAAABGQ/gRWkWhUK3FI/s1600/jer10.JPG" height="238" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">&nbsp;The Prince</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kNjZBxFfM_s/U9JkMlANBxI/AAAAAAAABGY/YA6dYyYSuCo/s1600/db10.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kNjZBxFfM_s/U9JkMlANBxI/AAAAAAAABGY/YA6dYyYSuCo/s1600/db10.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">&nbsp;Little Man</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kdhuWx6UmHs/U9JkQoo8MZI/AAAAAAAABGg/boP6c8U9t1I/s1600/hope10.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kdhuWx6UmHs/U9JkQoo8MZI/AAAAAAAABGg/boP6c8U9t1I/s1600/hope10.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Hope</div><br />To Him be all glory, honor and power.Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-9160715545947453392014-07-07T07:22:00.000-07:002014-07-07T07:22:00.379-07:00Grace's Surgery and EFBFWhat a month has gone by since my last update! &nbsp;Almost every morning I think, "Today I will update the blog!" &nbsp;And then another day goes by....or I decide that maybe what I would write that day would be worthless because I was so tired physically and emotionally. <br /><br />The good news is that Grace's surgery is done and was successful!&nbsp; Praise the Lord.&nbsp; She went in on Monday the 30th and came home on the 3rd.&nbsp; Handsome had to stay with her because there is no way I could do it with Little Man.&nbsp; It is hard for him to be away from work for even a few days, so I am very thankful he was able to do this.&nbsp;<br /><br />Grace will be in a half-body cast for at least 4 weeks, poor baby.&nbsp; The doctor decided that the second hip did not need to be operated on, so we are also very thankful for that.&nbsp; She did much, much better at the hospital with Daddy than she did with me in November for the g-tube.&nbsp; Again, God knows best.&nbsp; I was pretty frantic that I was not the one staying but with cell phones if the nurses needed to ask a question, it went very smoothly.<br /><br />She had to have a special car seat and we have to be careful on how we position her at home.&nbsp; Her pain meds are also critical at this point.&nbsp; We were a little late this morning and she was hurting.&nbsp; It broke my heart.&nbsp; Please continue to pray for her.&nbsp; That she heals quickly and well.&nbsp; Pray for us as we maneuver through the next few weeks with the cast.&nbsp; The day(s) right after the cast is taken off will also be incredibly hard....so many prayers would be appreciated.<br /><br />In the meantime, I am suffering with EFBF - Extremely Fussy Baby Fatigue.&nbsp; This is a condition in which your baby is so fussy that you are worn out body and soul.&nbsp; It quickly develops a partnering condition of EFBA - Extremely Fussy Baby Anxiety.&nbsp; This is when your baby is so fussy that you have to strategically plan <i>everything</i> - including things like how to go to the restroom - around your baby's screaming.&nbsp; When you look at <i>everything</i> you have to do through the lens of, "How do I do this with one hand?" while bouncing your fussy baby with the other hand.&nbsp; Both can be downright debilitating. <br /><br />Yes.&nbsp; Right after my last blog post, my content baby turned into our typical extremely fussy baby.&nbsp; I had forgotten how hard this is.&nbsp; I am just not hard-wired right to handle a screaming baby - it just completely undoes me.&nbsp; Don't get me wrong, we <i>do </i>let him cry. We <i>have</i> to in order to keep life moving here, but it is just not something that I am able to get used to.&nbsp; Our hardest time right now is at night when I need to feed and rock Mimi to sleep.&nbsp; By the time I lay her down, I am wiping back the tears at hearing him cry in the other room - as well as feeling so badly for Handsome, The Warrior, or The Testy Chef - whoever has the turn of trying to walk/bounce him until I can come get him.&nbsp; By the time I have him back, I am so wound up that I cannot sleep....leading to more Fussy Baby Anxiety!&nbsp;<br /><br />So right now, even the most mundane like showering, using the restroom, folding laundry, and cooking has become epic in proportion. <i>However,</i> because this is our ninth or tenth kiddo like this, I do know that it is just a season.&nbsp; That <i>eventually</i> (with some a little over a year) this too shall pass.&nbsp; I am so in love with this Little Man and so thankful for this precious gift my Savior gave to me that I cry over him daily.&nbsp; Even during such a hard, hard time, I know that I have been blessed beyond measure - far beyond what I could ever have imagined.&nbsp; I know this seems contradictory to some, but it is the truth.&nbsp; It is a huge struggle to get through the days, yet I am so filled with joy over him.<br /><br />My precious family did go camping in mid-June.&nbsp; The Helper and The Testy Chef (my two oldest daughters) stayed home with me and the "Little 5" to help and to finish their schoolwork.&nbsp; It was a really difficult week with Little Man and trying to keep the other four well taken care of so the girls could study.&nbsp; BUT the amazing thing to me - though some of you will laugh - is how QUIET it was (other than Little Man!).&nbsp; I could not believe it.&nbsp; I just soaked it in every day.&nbsp; In addition, a completely amazing thing happened - something I was told was true, but had seriously doubted over the years...when I had a few seconds to clean something...it <i>STAYED</i> clean.&nbsp; Really!&nbsp; Did you catch that?&nbsp; It <b><i>STAYED</i></b> clean.&nbsp; I have to say, as silly as it sounds, this did give me some hope for the distant future.&nbsp; I might, just might, have a clean house some day....ah, bliss!<br /><br />The week after, my two oldest girls took a trip to Colorado with their Bible quiz team.&nbsp; The Helper's team took second in the nation and she was personally the third highest quizzer in the nation!&nbsp; I am so proud of them both!&nbsp; While they were playing and getting a much deserved break, Handsome, The Warrior, and I had to hold down the fort at home.&nbsp; These are really tiring days!&nbsp; The day after they got home was Grace's surgery - so the team at home shifted again to the Big 3 kids and I while Handsome was in the hospital with Grace.<br /><br />This morning, my Big 3 are headed off to youth camp.....Can I say that I am really <i>dreading</i> this week?&nbsp; I don't think any of them read my blog regularly, but I won't post this until they are gone...two of the three have offered repeatedly to stay home and help me.&nbsp; It makes my Mama's heart melt at their kindness, but there is <i>no way</i> I am going to let one of them stay home.&nbsp; Their youth group is an amazing group of kids and leaders and they deserve the break!&nbsp; But....I am still dreading this week.&nbsp; After the Big 3, I have three 10 year old boys, an 8 year old girl, and a 7 year old boy.&nbsp; I am realizing more and more that they just have not been expected to learn/do the same things as the Big 3 because they are so capable....so this is a good week to really work on some training.&nbsp; I have realized, especially with the boys, that there really seems to be a 'you-got-it-or-you-don't' gene for taking care of smaller kids - and I get that.&nbsp; I don't expect them all to be kid-helpers.&nbsp; But I should be able to say, "Will you take care of ______?" and have it get done.&nbsp; Hmmmm, another area to work on. &nbsp; Regardless, I would so appreciate prayers for this week. <br /><br />Once the Big 3 are back, life still stays busy for July.&nbsp; Lots of doctors' appointments and Serenity has her surgery for tonsils, adenoids, and ear tubes the end of this month.&nbsp; Another extended family camping trip in there as well.&nbsp; I just keep praying that although I am exhausted (EFBF and EFBA), that my kids are loving their summer and will be filled to the brim by the time we need to focus on school again.&nbsp; Praying for the strength for today....and tomorrow...and the next day....<br /><br />Here are a few photos for fun:<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ycVf4RiJjQU/U7qjpWRQrkI/AAAAAAAABD4/o8KEsLxBmRc/s1600/Hope+2014+D.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ycVf4RiJjQU/U7qjpWRQrkI/AAAAAAAABD4/o8KEsLxBmRc/s1600/Hope+2014+D.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Hope playing</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-T8T_7JPLSGc/U7qnMKqYE_I/AAAAAAAABEk/03RIkgEs-F0/s1600/BlogC.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-T8T_7JPLSGc/U7qnMKqYE_I/AAAAAAAABEk/03RIkgEs-F0/s1600/BlogC.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Serenity with Grandpa!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZBMxnSjHADU/U7qnQnspL1I/AAAAAAAABEs/LJQZzoGbvBk/s1600/Blog+D.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZBMxnSjHADU/U7qnQnspL1I/AAAAAAAABEs/LJQZzoGbvBk/s1600/Blog+D.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Hope with Smiley and The Boss</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yk2eCFIxl1Q/U7qnTM2ythI/AAAAAAAABE0/jx-rgNLuSog/s1600/BlogE.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-yk2eCFIxl1Q/U7qnTM2ythI/AAAAAAAABE0/jx-rgNLuSog/s1600/BlogE.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Hope on her hands and knees!!!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-doDhK4VdTCo/U7qndmY6cJI/AAAAAAAABFM/VGzA3I0S2Hc/s1600/BlogG.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-doDhK4VdTCo/U7qndmY6cJI/AAAAAAAABFM/VGzA3I0S2Hc/s1600/BlogG.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Hope with Grandma</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1x87_4XdYG8/U7qniSDd6EI/AAAAAAAABFU/gYFHZGB7uos/s1600/BlogH.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1x87_4XdYG8/U7qniSDd6EI/AAAAAAAABFU/gYFHZGB7uos/s1600/BlogH.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Mimi with Grandpa</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8GF7yuneoko/U7qj0BKN43I/AAAAAAAABEI/SajgIRW6kbc/s1600/speck+3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8GF7yuneoko/U7qj0BKN43I/AAAAAAAABEI/SajgIRW6kbc/s1600/speck+3.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">The Testy Chef with Little Man</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WsMI4TE9FTc/U7qnVhy7WZI/AAAAAAAABE8/2yF3CTIIAms/s1600/BlogF.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-WsMI4TE9FTc/U7qnVhy7WZI/AAAAAAAABE8/2yF3CTIIAms/s1600/BlogF.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Grace and Little Man</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-k21gaicCg5g/U7qqvnXGUiI/AAAAAAAABFo/txgw9q0lRKU/s1600/BlogM.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-k21gaicCg5g/U7qqvnXGUiI/AAAAAAAABFo/txgw9q0lRKU/s1600/BlogM.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">The Boss</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-u2ng545Y7aU/U7qq0w0hBUI/AAAAAAAABFw/c9_fla55SnQ/s1600/BlogN.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-u2ng545Y7aU/U7qq0w0hBUI/AAAAAAAABFw/c9_fla55SnQ/s1600/BlogN.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">The Warrior with Little Man</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AQljJqnyrhs/U7qq36bvq5I/AAAAAAAABF4/qozOKkB8078/s1600/BlogO.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AQljJqnyrhs/U7qq36bvq5I/AAAAAAAABF4/qozOKkB8078/s1600/BlogO.JPG" height="239" width="320" />&nbsp;</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Serenity (She is so easy to get fun pictures of!)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-liBRgYfwOK8/U7qnIq7WymI/AAAAAAAABEc/DVlVTwI22xs/s1600/Blogb.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-liBRgYfwOK8/U7qnIq7WymI/AAAAAAAABEc/DVlVTwI22xs/s1600/Blogb.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Little Man</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KP5bv93eLGg/U7qq5M0KswI/AAAAAAAABGA/i10rqsBc6UQ/s1600/BlogP.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KP5bv93eLGg/U7qq5M0KswI/AAAAAAAABGA/i10rqsBc6UQ/s1600/BlogP.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The Helper and Serenity (both addicted to selfies). </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-55248587930268374032014-06-04T07:33:00.003-07:002014-06-04T07:33:15.844-07:00Don't Let Me Choose....I have my Little Man snuggled in on my shoulder.&nbsp; I hear Mimi playing with her toys around the corner.&nbsp; Handsome and Smiley went into the shop early this morning to get some work done before the day really begins.&nbsp; Everyone else is asleep....<br /><br />I treasure my early mornings as I sip my coffee and spend time with my Savior.&nbsp; It is the only way to start a morning.&nbsp; I can focus my heart on the right things, plan for the day, and spend time in thanksgiving for all things.&nbsp; As it gets lighter earlier each day, I wake up a little earlier and enjoy more time.&nbsp; If it gets too early, I may need a little more coffee!&nbsp; ;-)<br /><br />Ever since Little Man arrived almost 3 weeks ago, the same thought has been running through my mind.&nbsp; It has been one of my main prayers for the last year or more ~ <span style="color: purple;">"Lord, don't let me choose.&nbsp; Don't let me choose because<i> I will choose the wrong thing every time."</i></span>&nbsp; The more I walk with Him, the older I get, the more I see this to be true.&nbsp; So many decisions are made on the emotion of the moment, not based on a far-reaching or a Christ-glorifying perspective.&nbsp; It is based on my emotions of the moment - which are usually temporary, easily swayed, and so often selfish.<br /><br />In October, I would have chosen not to be pregnant - and obviously not to have had a stroke.&nbsp; <i>I am NOT saying I would have chosen to abort.&nbsp; I am saying I would have chosen to not get pregnant in the first place.</i>&nbsp; I would have chosen the easy way.&nbsp; Even at the time, based on my life to that point, a niggling voice whispered that once I had seen my little baby's face, I would think it was all worth it - but I didn't want to go through the discomfort and the difficulties.&nbsp; I didn't want to have to battle fear over the stroke and dangers for months and months.&nbsp; I didn't want to figure out how we would get through the last weeks when Grace was too heavy for me to lift and I couldn't get down on the floor to change diapers and clothes.&nbsp; I didn't want to fight off those feelings that I get every pregnancy of feeling like life was "on hold" for almost a year.&nbsp; (Again, this is a <i>feeling, </i>not based in truth.)&nbsp; Life was hard enough each day without adding <i>more</i> to it.&nbsp; I also, honestly, didn't want to give the critics any more targets to aim at as they are always firing off anyway.<br /><br />I see so many areas that if I had chosen, I would have taken the wrong path.&nbsp; I would have chosen something easier, some that seemed clear compared to the other path, something I could understand, something that took less faith and less risk.&nbsp; Something that seemed like it would partially ease the desires pounding in my heart, but in reality would have been like eating an Oreo when what I really needed was a full day's worth of good, nutritious food.&nbsp; It would have eased the hunger pains for about 5 minutes and then I would have been in need again.&nbsp; <i>But how many times would I have chosen the Oreo instead of waiting for my precious Savior to provide what I really needed?</i>&nbsp; Every. Single. Time.&nbsp; Yes, a very humiliating and humbling answer.&nbsp; I would chose the wildly changing emotions over the truths in Scripture and the unbroken pattern of Christ's faithful provision for me.<br /><br />I have learned how very dangerous emotions can be <u>if</u> they lead me away from the truth found in God's Word.&nbsp; This is not to say all emotion is wrong.&nbsp; The Bible is full of emotion - the joy of the Lord, rejoicing in all circumstances, abhorring what is evil - the examples go on and on.&nbsp; The danger comes from the emotions that say, "I know You are asking this of me - because all things are in Your perfect Hands - but <i>I don't want to."&nbsp; </i>I may not want to for many reasons - I am too tired, it is too hard, I can't understand why or how, it was not part of my plan,&nbsp; it just seems utterly impossible, I don't <i>feel</i> like doing it, etc., etc.&nbsp;<br /><br />By the way, I have heard throughout my life people saying that if God truly wanted them to do something, He would make it so that they <i>wanted</i> to do it.&nbsp; Because they don't "want' to do it, it must not be God's Will.....as they brush it from their hands and walk away.&nbsp; Well, following that logic, Abraham must have <i>wanted</i> to sacrifice Isaac, Daniel must have <i>wanted</i> to be held captive by the Babylonians, Paul must have <i>wanted</i> to be beaten and eventually beheaded, and Christ must have<i> wanted </i>to be crucified and suffer His Father's wrath....right?&nbsp; Remember, even Christ prayed that the cup would be removed from Him if it was possible!&nbsp; What all of them <i>wanted</i> above all else - even their own emotions - was to obey whatever God asked of them - not the specific circumstances!!!!&nbsp; There is a huge difference there.&nbsp; A life-changing difference if believers would apply it to their lives.<br /><br />So, as I snuggle this little man, I am so indescribably grateful that I didn't get to choose...that God knew best, and gave me another perfect gift.&nbsp; All my children are perfect gifts given by a loving Father.&nbsp; He heard the cries and saw the tears of a young woman so many years ago, sitting in an empty baby's room.&nbsp; I thought my arms would always be empty - yet here I am, my cup overflowing by His grace.&nbsp; How do I ever fail to trust His faithfulness and His perfect plan?<br /><br />Soooo, does this mean that life is easy?&nbsp; Nooooo.&nbsp; Little Man is a very content baby - only our second content baby out of a dozen that came to us before they turned 13 months old!&nbsp; That makes everything much more enjoyable - but still a challenge.&nbsp; I think it helps as well that we have done this so many times - so we know that we must strive to find our new "normal."&nbsp;&nbsp; Our biggest challenge right now is that he usually decides he <i>must</i> eat immediately, when I am in the middle of feeding one of the other three girls.&nbsp; There are a total of 13 feedings that I need to do separately each day between Grace, Mimi, and Hope.&nbsp; Some of them Handsome can help with - in a pinch, the oldest three can help, but it is not ideal.&nbsp; We also are trying to find a new normal with the bedtime routine. I want to rock each of the girls before I put them in bed (some in combination with a feeding), but am having trouble as Little Man also needs me at the same time....hmmm.&nbsp; How to do it all?<br /><br />It is the end of the school year as well.&nbsp; We did the required testing (by our state) last week.&nbsp; In the past, this has always marked the end of our school year.&nbsp; However, this year due to the trip to rescue Serenity and Hope, my oldest three are not done yet.&nbsp; I have to laugh how important summer break is to me - I obviously went to public school!&nbsp; I want to have a few weeks that we do not have to focus on assignments and due dates....but it may be a precious few weeks this year!&nbsp; If you would, please pray for my oldest three - to have the motivation to get their work done.&nbsp; I know it is discouraging to them even though they say it was more than worth it.<br /><br />We have some camping trips on the calendar this summer, the first of which is next week.&nbsp; However, this year I will be staying home.&nbsp; The Testy Chef has volunteered to stay with me - but, oh, how I wish I was going!&nbsp; But I know this is the best plan for this year.&nbsp; Little Man is so tiny and I just don't think that Hope is ready for such a huge thing yet.&nbsp;&nbsp; Grace will also be happier in her comfy chair rather than having to deal with changes.&nbsp; It would be a good experience for Serenity, but it would also make it very, very hard for Handsome to juggle the needs of the other kids and corral Serenity for her safety. &nbsp; There is another trip planned for mid-July, but Grace will be in her cast from her hip surgery, so I will stay home with youngest again. We have a church camping trip at the end of August that is only 90 minutes away from home.&nbsp; The plan is that we will all try to go for this trip, but that decision will be made as it gets closer.&nbsp; <br /><br />This is one of the realities of adding kiddos with special challenges.&nbsp; Handsome and I have to balance out the needs of each precious one with the needs of all the others.&nbsp; In this case, the camping trips are a very important part of family life.&nbsp; We go with my parents and my siblings.&nbsp; It is a very precious time of relationships and freedom from the responsibilities at home.&nbsp; Last year, the first trip was hard on Grace, enough so that I came home two days early, but it was so good for everyone else!&nbsp; With such a large group going, my bigger kids get a break from their daily responsibilities and the younger ones can help with chores as adults guide them.&nbsp; Keeping this in mind, Handsome and I knew that we wanted to have those who were able have the ability to go even if others couldn't.&nbsp; I am so thankful for a husband that is able to do so much - even bring 8 kids camping without me!<br /><br />Hope is doing very well right now.&nbsp; She is consistently sleeping through the night.&nbsp; This is probably due to the fact that she is now mobile!&nbsp; Praise God!&nbsp; She is scooching on her bottom around the house.&nbsp; So now we have to corral she and Serenity and Mimi.&nbsp; We laugh at our "modular" gating system - trying to block off the areas that they are not safe in, yet giving them enough freedom to explore.&nbsp;&nbsp; She is now drinking from a sippy cup on her own as well.&nbsp; Our next food challenge will be for her to expand the "flavors" she is willing to eat and to start taking food with more texture.&nbsp; Honestly, it makes me exhausted to just think of that battle ahead.&nbsp; I have realized that all of my adopted kiddos have wills of iron - except for Grace.&nbsp; I think they have to have this determination and "fight" to survive their circumstances as a orphan - but boy, can it make the learning process at home very hard!<br /><br />At therapy yesterday, they put Hope in a gait trainer like Mimi's and she was moving until she got cranky about it.&nbsp; We will pull out Mimi's and work on it at home as well.&nbsp; I do not think it will be long until she is walking though.&nbsp; She is now pulling herself up to her knees at the couch to get to things - the drawback of being so much bigger than a 9-12 month old is that there is nothing really tall enough for her to pull up to a stand yet.&nbsp; She listens very intently to all that is going on around her, but she is not trying to babble or talk yet.&nbsp; She makes a lot of "noises" but they are not in patterns or recognizable sounds yet.&nbsp; We are debating when to begin some speech therapy with her.&nbsp; From experience we know, especially with the speech therapy, that there needs to be at least some willingness to cooperate and we are just not sure that is there yet with her.&nbsp; Overall, I am praising God as she grows calmer and more secure.&nbsp; I am working on focusing on the progress already instead of the distance that still needs to be conquered.<br /><br />Serenity is still full of life!&nbsp; I pray that never changes - but it can be so exhausting.&nbsp; The damage to Hope's emotions and cognitive abilities are very, very obvious.&nbsp; The damage to Serenity is not immediately obvious, but is there nonetheless.&nbsp; There is simply no behavioral control for her.&nbsp; If she is happy, she is EXTREMELY happy.&nbsp; If she is mad, she is EXTREMELY mad.&nbsp; If she wants something, she wants it NOW.&nbsp; If she wants on your lap, she wants on it NOW.&nbsp; If she doesn't get what she wants, she immediately flies into a massive temper tantrum.&nbsp; (We call them grand-mal temper tantrums as they are all-consuming.)&nbsp; I have come to realize that although she was in a good orphanage and was loved by the people there very much, she was on a crash course to be one of the older children that are tied to their beds because no one can control them.&nbsp; I am NOT saying this is okay in any stretch of the imagination - but I have come to see how it happens.&nbsp; Many of the older children that have such huge behavioral challenges, have come to be that way, not necessarily because of their special needs but because of a complete lack of training in self-control.&nbsp; When they are tiny and cute (like Serenity), the behavior can be controlled by distraction and physically moving/restraining them - but as they get bigger and stronger, it is no longer easily done.&nbsp; And honestly, it is no longer "cute" anymore.&nbsp; It gets to the point that no one wants to deal with it and they are then confined to control them.&nbsp; Very, very sad.&nbsp; Handsome and I have discussed several times that although Serenity and Hope's orphanages were extreme opposites, in the end, the consequences end up the same as they grow older.&nbsp; Children need families.&nbsp; There is no substitute for this.&nbsp; None.<br /><br />My time is gone today....I am so thankful for each one of you that read and pray for us.&nbsp; I pray you can learn from my mistakes and failings without having to go through it yourselves.&nbsp; I pray that you can see God's grace shining over two people who are so imperfect and limited - but are able to do what God has asked of them by His power and grace.&nbsp; I pray that you can see even though we are sinful and flawed, that we desire to serve and glorify our Savior above all else.<br /><br />Oh, and one last HUGE praise!&nbsp; Samson has a family!&nbsp; Praise the LORD!<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tadwYbwxFbA/U48sDAZXX5I/AAAAAAAABDE/otAoCAjFc-c/s1600/Eric.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tadwYbwxFbA/U48sDAZXX5I/AAAAAAAABDE/otAoCAjFc-c/s1600/Eric.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><br />We are at the six month mark for Serenity and Hope&nbsp; - so we have a post-placement visit with the caseworker this week.&nbsp; As I gather the pictures for that, I will post them here......<br /><br />Until He comes....may He be glorified in all things.Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-89451894850647348962014-05-30T12:28:00.000-07:002014-05-30T12:28:55.136-07:00Counting my blessings one by one...Had to share this picture....will do an update soon!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-L0SbmEaOYAs/U4jbrKI-KiI/AAAAAAAABC0/echWdm8r2tg/s1600/db3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-L0SbmEaOYAs/U4jbrKI-KiI/AAAAAAAABC0/echWdm8r2tg/s1600/db3.JPG" height="298" width="400" /></a></div><br />Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-28963886398209087842014-05-18T12:17:00.002-07:002014-05-22T16:07:30.364-07:00An Indescribable Blessing!Perfection....born May 13th....weighing only 8lbs 12oz (it was thought he would be 11 lbs)....<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;">God is so good and His plans are perfect</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3D0bHBaYV7E/U3kG_eAX86I/AAAAAAAABCE/A5ztk5vAZ3M/s1600/baby+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-3D0bHBaYV7E/U3kG_eAX86I/AAAAAAAABCE/A5ztk5vAZ3M/s1600/baby+2.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div>Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5170883531793300780.post-89422332106893097732014-04-24T20:14:00.000-07:002014-04-25T20:51:14.435-07:00Racing by...Where have the days gone?&nbsp; Good grief...I am sorry for the neglected little blog!<br /><br />First of all, Grace did<i> not</i> have her surgery.&nbsp; She began throwing up in the middle of the night before the surgery and that was that.&nbsp; She is rescheduled for the end of June.&nbsp; While it was a bit of a relief at the time, it will be much more complicated when Little Man arrives and a hot summer with a half body cast.&nbsp; Another thing I am just trusting our loving Father has a plan!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-t_oruuklmXc/U1ssisGHLZI/AAAAAAAABB0/XV5QwuIyhcw/s1600/yc+daniel.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-t_oruuklmXc/U1ssisGHLZI/AAAAAAAABB0/XV5QwuIyhcw/s1600/yc+daniel.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zVjO2gIhvHM/U1ssKFDw1FI/AAAAAAAABBE/Af6_XkTMKZw/s1600/a+yc+smile.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zVjO2gIhvHM/U1ssKFDw1FI/AAAAAAAABBE/Af6_XkTMKZw/s1600/a+yc+smile.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><br />Little Grace has been so <span style="color: orange;">happy<span style="color: #444444;"> these last few weeks.</span></span>&nbsp; We are not sure why, but we are enjoying it so much.&nbsp; She "sings" to us and laughs and smiles.&nbsp; It is just pure delight to us.&nbsp; She is doing well in therapy as well.&nbsp; Although it may not seem like much, she is<i> trying</i> to move her little body...what a wonderful thing to behold!&nbsp; A child who was written off as nothing - seeing her grow in her own ways.&nbsp; Praise the Lord, oh my soul!&nbsp; We love this child more than could ever be imagined.&nbsp; She is the apple of her Daddy's eye and a favorite of all her brothers and sisters.&nbsp; God took something that was such a huge step of faith and has poured blessings over us in abundance!&nbsp; Praise His holy name!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kRjY6Z83kL0/U1ssO_HpSHI/AAAAAAAABBQ/1Bhb8jKt9WM/s1600/a+don+yc.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kRjY6Z83kL0/U1ssO_HpSHI/AAAAAAAABBQ/1Bhb8jKt9WM/s1600/a+don+yc.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br />Little Hope is slowly, oh so slowly, opening up to life around her.&nbsp; I am more convinced than ever that there is so much more going on in her little heart and mind than we ever guessed.&nbsp; But there is such scarring and damage from her first 5 years, at times I am sure it is a very painful growth.&nbsp; I am sure there are days she wants to retreat to a world of "nothingness" just to avoid the growth pains.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-79k3isxnalo/U1ssYk3dl8I/AAAAAAAABBo/4kp5lbyrtdY/s1600/a+hope.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-79k3isxnalo/U1ssYk3dl8I/AAAAAAAABBo/4kp5lbyrtdY/s1600/a+hope.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br />She has started demanding more food on her own.&nbsp; This is HUGE....it is a huge step that she is pushing for something, anything she needs.&nbsp; We knew she needed more calories, but just could not get her to eat more.&nbsp; She is now eating double what she was a week ago AND she is drinking from a sippy cup with handles <i>by herself</i>!&nbsp; Again, we praise the Lord!&nbsp; Every little thing she learns she can do is one more step towards healing and growth. I know that it may seem so small...too small for our level of excitement...but it is not.&nbsp; Not when we know where she has been and what she has had to endure - or go without.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yrSRz-n9pQU/U1ssTFYpcTI/AAAAAAAABBY/JpDkRkqgi1Y/s1600/a+boys+hope.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yrSRz-n9pQU/U1ssTFYpcTI/AAAAAAAABBY/JpDkRkqgi1Y/s1600/a+boys+hope.JPG" height="239" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br />She is also doing very well in physical therapy.&nbsp; Mimi's therapist has taken over with her and has truly fallen in love with this little pixy girl.&nbsp; She is <i>so</i> close to crawling.&nbsp; I cannot even begin to measure how this will change her little world.&nbsp; As well, she is actively <i>playing</i> with her sisters and brothers.&nbsp; She seeks attention from Smiley in particular and he is more than happy to oblige.&nbsp; What a gift God has given us in each child - each strength and ability.&nbsp; The Helper has begun to come every week to therapy as well so that she can see what things she can work with Hope on.&nbsp; How my heart overflows with love for each gift we have.<br /><br />Mimi is turning 6 years old tomorrow!&nbsp; This is so difficult to fathom.&nbsp; This little tiny girl - hardly the size of a two year old...the little one that we didn't even know if she would make it to her first birthday...and here we are getting ready to celebrate her sixth!&nbsp; I can't tell you what this does to my heart - again, the blessing upon blessing!&nbsp; This has been an interesting few months with her as well.&nbsp; After <i>years</i> of struggling to get her to eat even the tiniest little bits by mouth - she has decided that if Hope can do it, so can she!&nbsp; She and Hope battle each other to be the first to be fed!&nbsp; Another praise.&nbsp; She still must be fed the majority of her food via g-tube because she just cannot get enough fluids/calories by mouth - but there is always hope for more.&nbsp; In addition, it just adds to the input in her life - good foods, sweet flavors, joining with others as we eat.&nbsp; She always comes quickly if she sees me with food and wants a taste - even if it is just a little.&nbsp; Thank you, my Savior!<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MzkRjtzrWd8/U1ssY9nILlI/AAAAAAAABBk/Al8hwQMW9Sk/s1600/a+mercy.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MzkRjtzrWd8/U1ssY9nILlI/AAAAAAAABBk/Al8hwQMW9Sk/s1600/a+mercy.JPG" height="240" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br />We have also seen another side of little Mimi as she purposely crawls over to Hope and angles her feet to kick at her!&nbsp; We were so shocked the first time - not our little baby!&nbsp; She wouldn't do that....would she?&nbsp; Sure enough!&nbsp; Poor Hope!&nbsp; Mimi is also getting more demanding of sitting on my lap or snuggling - not the best development with Little Man just a few weeks away!&nbsp; Big changes in store, little girl....just wait and see.<br /><br />And then there is the hurricane....Serenity!&nbsp; Yep, still have not found a way to summarize this ball of energy beyond..."wow".&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; We will meet with the ENT (ear-nose-and-throat doctor) on Monday.&nbsp; He is the one that will need to sign the prescription for hearing aids.&nbsp; I am beginning to feel a little frantic about getting them.&nbsp; I need to know how much of the behavioral issues are simply her dynamic personality and how much is due to her being closed off in her own little world due to hearing loss.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kobcFun4th8/U1sscoqVLXI/AAAAAAAABBw/D3YWTFWTbmw/s1600/a+ser.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kobcFun4th8/U1sscoqVLXI/AAAAAAAABBw/D3YWTFWTbmw/s1600/a+ser.JPG" height="320" width="239" /></a></div><br /><br />This last Monday was a big day for her at the Children's Hospital.&nbsp; Her CT scans were done and we met with a slew of experts.&nbsp; I think I went into the appointment feeling pretty relaxed.&nbsp; After all, they assumed the "worst case" scenarios with Hope and instead all was very, very good and she is a "textbook" case&nbsp; for her surgery in about a year.&nbsp; With Serenity, they have always been pretty positive...so just another textbook case.&nbsp; Right?&nbsp; (You know already the answer coming, right?)&nbsp; Nope, not at all.&nbsp; No textbook scenario this time.<br /><br />Although she always charms with socks off of the doctors and staff - and although she is so capable in so many ways - there is significant pressure on her little brain from the skull malformations.&nbsp; Much, much more than they assumed, even with a child with Apert Syndrome.&nbsp; In fact, they showed me pictures of the <i>inside</i> of her skull - where there is massive "scalloping" of the bone where the throbbing of the brain is carving away sections of the skull.&nbsp; Wow.&nbsp; That is hard to even think about.&nbsp; Her (wild) hair also does such a great job hiding her skull, it was pretty sobering to see how different it is from an "average" skull.<br /><br />The discussions that went on in the room full of colleagues was a little sobering.&nbsp; This is not a "textbook" situation after all.&nbsp; We knew she would need surgery on her skull (obviously) and we knew that her mid-face would need surgery...in fact, there are a lot of surgeries we knew she would need to have - but it moved to a whole new level of urgency after the scans.<br /><br />After much debate and discussion, it sounds like the approach will be to have her tonsils and adenoids removed soon to allow her to breathe better, especially at night.&nbsp; (She snores like a boat full of drunken sailors.)&nbsp; Then they will tackle the skull.&nbsp; The goal is to shorten the height, while adding to the width.&nbsp; She also has a significant hole at the top of her head (which is probably her saving grace right now) but will need to be closed.&nbsp; The hope is to be able to add to the forehead enough to start to protect her eyes, which are significantly unprotected right now.&nbsp; How hard it is to even fathom this.&nbsp; Thankfully, God has brought another family into our lives - who have become the very dearest of friends - whose daughter has had numerous cranio surgeries.&nbsp; So they can help us to know what to expect.&nbsp; One of the hardest parts emotionally, will be to have her head shaved.&nbsp; We try so hard to show how beautiful each of our children are - it is going to take some creativity to work with that shaved head, especially in the summertime!&nbsp; It is silly when compared to the magnitude of her issues - but emotions are never rational, are they?<br /><br />All of this to pray on, even as the days are getting so short before we welcome Little Man into the world.&nbsp; Not quite 3 weeks left - how hard that is to believe!&nbsp; They measured him almost 2 weeks ago and he was already at 7 1/2 PLUS pounds.&nbsp; Wow!&nbsp; No wonder I am so uncomfortable!&nbsp; He may be nearing 11 pounds by the time he is delivered.&nbsp; The Boss, our last bio baby, was 10lbs 1oz - so we will see if we have a new record holder.&nbsp; Maybe a c-section is not so bad after all! ;-)<br /><br />On a slightly different topic, I have been "chatting" via email with another mom of many.&nbsp; A woman that I admire so very much and wish I could just have one cup of coffee with her in person!&nbsp; We had to laugh as we both thought the other person was "superwoman" because of all she seemed to do...how silly to see how wrong our assumptions were.&nbsp; So, I just want to share a few ways in which God has provided for what we have needed.<br /><br />After my stroke in October, we knew that Handsome needed to go on the rescue mission to get Serenity and Hope.&nbsp; That left me at home - in that very sick and tired pregnancy stage - taking care of the rest of the treasures as Handsome and my two oldest were gone for 2 weeks.&nbsp; All I could do was pray for strength.&nbsp; But God had a huge gift already in process for us.&nbsp; The mother-in-law of a very dear friend told me that she wanted to come stay with me the entire two weeks Handsome was gone.&nbsp; I cannot tell you how blown over I was by her offer!&nbsp; I had always enjoyed her company although we did not see each other regularly - but I could have never imagined her making such an offer, especially living 90 minutes away over the mountain passes.&nbsp; I couldn't help but think though that our chaotic crowd would scare her away before the 2 weeks were up!<br /><br />Well, she came a bit like the magical elves in the shoemaker's shop and began helping with the cleaning and cooking.&nbsp; We tackled <i>serious</i> housecleaning and organizing.&nbsp; Every single closet, bedroom, and shelf.&nbsp; In addition, she cleaned every carpet and scrubbed every surface.&nbsp; We were both exhausted every night.&nbsp; After the first week, she needed to go home for the weekend.&nbsp; I was secretly afraid that she would not be coming back - that we were just too much to handle.&nbsp; When she came back - to my delight!- on Sunday afternoon, she was <i>glowing</i>.&nbsp; Hmmm.&nbsp; What did that mean?&nbsp; Well, she shared with me her plan....Would we mind if she parked a camping trailer under our carport so she could come over two days every week to help us?&nbsp;<i> What?</i>&nbsp; I just couldn't believe it.&nbsp; I still can't.<br /><br />I had prayed for at least a year that if we needed "outside" help, that God would provide it.&nbsp; Although we have amazing family and church family, I just couldn't see anyone that could make that kind of commitment.&nbsp; Well, He graciously and amazingly provided through this loving woman.&nbsp; My kids now have "Grammy" in addition to their Grandma and Nana - and they <i>love</i> her.&nbsp; She has them over for cups of cocoa in her trailer and she is always willing to stop and love on one of the little girls as they need it.&nbsp; I cannot tell you how she has blessed us.&nbsp; She doesn't even hesitate to tackle the overflowing laundry baskets - even when she left them empty just the week before.&nbsp; I smile every time I see another indication of "Grammy" in my house.&nbsp; I had given up on weekly dusting and sparkling clean floors long ago - and yet I have them now - at least for 2 days a week! - because of her generous love.&nbsp; We still do laundry 6 days a week, all day....we still have to work to keep things picked up and in some sense of order...but she comes and helps pull it altogether again every week.&nbsp; What an amazing gift from our loving Father.&nbsp; She will come for 2 weeks at Little Man's grand entrance as well.&nbsp; Ahhh...bliss!<br /><br />Also, my mom, "Nana" has been homeschooling the youngest 5 homeschoolers this year.&nbsp; Wow!&nbsp; Another amazing gift.&nbsp; She laughs that she went to college and got an elementary teacher's degree forty something years ago....only to use it now!&nbsp; She is a born teacher.&nbsp; After a rough start - as every homeschool mom knows! - they are in a really good groove.&nbsp; This has freed me up immensely to work with the girls who have so many needs and to just meet the needs of such a large family - in addition to business paperwork for Handsome's business.<br /><br />I am not superwoman - I cannot do it all.&nbsp; Without this extra help, some things would have to be given up for a time...maybe even a <i>long</i> time.&nbsp; We make every adoptive decision based off of whether we could do it ourselves if necessary - but have been so amazed by the gifts given to us through our loving God - using those willing to serve wherever He asks.&nbsp; The days are still impossibly full.&nbsp; I still cry in exhaustion so many nights - but when I see His faithfulness to provide<i> all</i> that we need, my heart can rest in peace that He is always with us.&nbsp; I don't know what the future holds - but I have seen the One that holds the future...and He is faithful.&nbsp; ALWAYS.<br /><br />So in the coming weeks, please pray for Serenity's "game plan" with surgeries.&nbsp; Pray for safety and blessing with Little Man's delivery.&nbsp; Pray for His continued provision in all things.&nbsp; Pray for wisdom and amazing patience for Handsome and I as we raise these amazing young people.<br /><br />Please also pray for little Samson.&nbsp; He is in a horrific orphanage - one that we are very familiar with.&nbsp; I have been there - I know.&nbsp; He has CP - untreated CP - that is pulling his body backwards into a position that is making feeding and even breathing very, very difficult.&nbsp; Pray for a family to race forward to rescue him.&nbsp;&nbsp; You can read more <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70652/samson-438" target="_blank">here</a> .&nbsp; Here are several pictures....please print them out and pray for him.&nbsp; Please.<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-hq-10ivnoys/U1nPeOl4ZtI/AAAAAAAABAs/oF2ctNk-OOY/s1600/Samson.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-hq-10ivnoys/U1nPeOl4ZtI/AAAAAAAABAs/oF2ctNk-OOY/s1600/Samson.jpg" height="247" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kdyZ3B_jYvQ/U1nPpuh86CI/AAAAAAAABA0/fxiWZxsfu04/s1600/Eric.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kdyZ3B_jYvQ/U1nPpuh86CI/AAAAAAAABA0/fxiWZxsfu04/s1600/Eric.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>I know it would be so much easier to look away.&nbsp; To just pretend we didn't know.&nbsp; To not hurt and be horrified.&nbsp; But we can do something....please pray for him every time he comes to mind.&nbsp; He also has a donation button <a href="http://reecesrainbow.org/70652/samson-438" target="_blank">here</a> that you can make a tax-deductible donation to a fund that will be given to a family that chooses to rescue him.<br /><br />God is faithful.&nbsp; Always.Psalm127Mommyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12741689565381955655noreply@blogger.com2