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Welcome to Am I Infected

IMPORTANT UPDATE
Posted Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

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NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I
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Thank you for your understanding
and future support of the best online support service for people living with,
affected by and at risk for HIV.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

thank you ann, i think that was exactly what i needed to calm down. I now see that iīm not the first hypo with anxiety regarding fingering on this forum. I think i need to relax more. All my life iīve had these "i made a mistake and now im fucked for life" thoughts and experiences. I think iīm ready to settle down, get a girlfriend, and perhaps start performing yoga or something. I actually visited this clinic a couple of days ago and asked for a test, the nurse said that HIV-transmission through fingering was "unlikely". She also said that my fears probably are based on my inexperience, and i got an appointment for a test in october. She told me that if i got over my fears before then, i could call and cancel it. And right now, i donīt know what to do. I am still a bit worried. it took some time for the cut to heal even after my experience, and iīve started thinking: perhaps she was menstruating? which would be the only way for me to get infected, if she even was HIV+ to start with. But, i think iīm getting over this. should i test? i think testing would make me anxious again. I think that the time before i get my result is going to be a living nightmare of angst. Then again, if i am indeed negative, it would be very relieving. As iīve written before, i am a confused young man. Please guide me in the right direction. And hey, keep up the good work. You are all doing a great job with this site, and i am very thankfull. (I am sorry if iīve been annoying, i know i have.

If and when the time comes where you start having anal or vaginal intercourse, use condoms and you'll be fine. Make sure you read the condom and lube links in my signature line so you know you are using them correctly. A correctly used condom rarely breaks and provides excellent protection against hiv transmission.

Use condoms for intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

You guys know iīm starting to calm down and i relaxed this week after your very calming words. but the day before yesterday, i noticed lumps under my cheek, on the right side. The so called lymphs nodes there had swelled, without any infections, cuts, or zits in/on me. And this scares me. 4-5 weeks after my incident, they swell up. Sounds like a common HIV-symptom to me. Please help me out with the facts. What are the symptoms, if you get any?

Sounds like a common HIV-symptom to me. There is not a such thing as common HIV-symptom. You've been here long enough to read that on this forum. You also know that we don't discuss symptoms. Why? Because there are NO specific symptoms related to HIV and you can not diagnosis HIV by symptoms.

Would you be here if we charged you fifteen dollars a question? You didn't have a risk and you can do all the fearing you want, but it's not going to change our replies. If you haven't noticed we're done with your cut thumb and fingering.

yeah i understand your irritation. i can identify with it, but you seemed like you knew about the symptoms when you said that symptoms "doesīnt dwindle" can a infected toe or a little cut in my mouth make my cheek-lymph nodes swell? i can learn from this and pass my knowledge to others.

Do you just come here to see yourself post or do you take the time to read anything at all on this website?Let's start by you reading the "Welcome" tread and all its links. Then come back and read many of the posts, to answer your questions.

i have done so, thank you. Iīm just worried i may have done a fatal mistake, which i probably haveīnt but still. I guess you guys are quite familiar with the abstract angst that is HIVangst. And if you decide to ditch me from now on, itīs ok. you have given me lots helpful information. Take care, (and please, feel free to post something encouraging

man..could i be the first case of infection through fingering with my swollen nodes?

I urge you to seek professional help for what is obviously become an irrational obsession.

Logged

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

Please read the Welcome Thread and pay particular attention to the posting guidelines where it discusses time outs. If you continue to use this forum as a place to wring your hands over your no-risk incident, I will have no choice but to give you a four week time out.

Please consider yourself warned.

You did not have a risk of hiv infection and I encourage you to get the emotional support you need through the appropriate channels of a mental health care provider. We cannot offer you counseling here.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

thank you ann! thatīs exactly what i needed! i also read on another site that if and when lymph nodes swell from the virus, they all swell, not just my cheeklymphnodes. keep that in mind you other neurotic hypos out there. i know iīm extremely annoying at this point, and i just want to thank you all for your patience. youīre doing a great job with this site. i think i will get tested for this at some point in the future(just to get this off my mind permanently), and if you donīt mind, iīll maybe post a little for support. but itīs two months left.

one last question though: can i date like before without feeling guilty for perhaps infecting my partners? ( i just need you to confirm this, i know itīs silly)

If you're using condoms, every time, no exceptions, for anal or vaginal intercourse, not only do you not have to worry about being infected, but there is no way you could infect anyone else either. Condoms prevent hiv transmission and since unprotected intercourse is really the only seriously risky sexual behaviour, you don't have to worry about hiv when you use them.

Make sure you've read and studied the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can be sure you are using them correctly. Use them consistently too and you will avoid hiv infection. Yes, it really is that simple!

And by the way, since you didn't have a risk and therefore no infection, you can't possibly infect anyone anyway.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

oh, iīm gettin more anxious each day. what if i did some unprotected vaginal? i was drunk. i remember saying: "iīm glad we never did it, cause we were drunk". and a day later when i said something hypcondric she just said, "i haveīnt got tested since my last encoutner, but we never did it". and i canīt say i remember doing it either, or do i? i have brief memories of perhaps doing it... and my lymph nodes ache when i run. is this common if i touch them a few times a day? yes it is. but why did they show up in the first place? i am confused and anxious and will have to wait anoter 6 weeks to gain my peace.

If you were too drunk to remember, you were most likely too drunk to get hard enough to even have intercourse. It sounds like you're letting your imagination run away with you.

If you're worried about your glands, for a start, keep your hands off them. It can take a week or more for them to calm down after you've been irritating them. If they're still bothering you after they've had a chance to go back to normal, see your doctor about them. There are many illnesses that can cause your glands to swell and you could be missing something important by focusing on something you couldn't have. You didn't have a risk of hiv infection. You need to have a risk before you can get infected.

If you cannot shake the anxiety, you need to get yourself some face-to-face support and help for it and we cannot give you that here. If you continue to use this place to fuel your fears, I'll have to give you a time out to encourage you to get the appropriate help for yourself. Please consider yourself warned.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

thanks ann. I have no one to talkt to about this. my parents?(i live at home) donīt think so. how do i keep my mind off this until the test in october? ( i canīt continue lying on the floor, playing earth angel on my saxophone, dreaming of all the girls i have missed out on getting infected)

Like I said, get some face-to-face support. See your doctor for a referral - or if you're still in school, contact their counseling department. Your level of anxiety over this no-risk situation is way out of proportion and some counseling will help give you perspective.

In the meantime, keep busy doing things you enjoy. You do NOT need to test over this in the first place. You didn't have a risk.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

the source of my worries: a doctor at a youthcare homepgage said that transmission was naturally possible if cuts were involved during fingering. i haveīnt told this before. he was a doctor, but you are expers at this particular subject. i trust you, and iīll try to relax.

what are the chances of obtaining HIV by "dipping" your penis in a vagina back and forth once or a few times without ejaculation? not that it has happened to me, iīm just curious. and i think others are as well.

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Dipping means actually dipping your unprotected penis into a vagina or anus and it is a risk. I think you're talking about frottage though, were genitals are rubbed together without penetration. This is NOT a risk.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

You can change the title of your thread at any time. I kept the new title so you'd know what was going on. Just go into your first post and hit the modify button. Change the title, but not the body of the first post. Keep posting anything new at the bottom.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

is it true, that when nodes swell from the HIV infection, they donīt just swell at one particular spot? Dr. Bob stated this in his archives. if it is indeed true. it would be very relieving, not just for me, but to other anxious, worried souls at this forum.

Hiv is an infection of the blood. Your blood flows to every point in your body. Therefore, any symptoms that occur caused by primary hiv infection tend to be general, all over type symptoms, like when you have the flu. Lymph swelling in one place tends to be caused by a bacterial infection in a specific area, such as your throat. Not everyone has symptoms of hiv seroconversion and those who do have general, non-specific ones.

The biggest cause of lymph swelling we see in this forum is people constantly touching and irritating them. Keep your hands OFF your glands.

You did NOT have a risk. Please read the Posting Guidelines found in the Welcome Thread and pay particular attention to the guideline on continual posting over a no-risk event. Please consider yourself warned.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

yeah, iīm warned. i just donīt see how a perfectly healthy guy would develop big lymphnodes under my cheek 4 -5 weeks after my NO RISK-incident. i was eating cheetos that day, and perhaps cutting my sensitive mouth with them or something...right?i donīt get this. right now iīm doing something stupid, iīm touching the glands so they will keep swollen more than 2 weeks so that they wonīt be a ARS-symptom. iīve also got hands/feet that buzz very easily these days, and iīve had my diarrhea experiences throughout the months. anyway, consider this one of my last posts for a month or so.

i surfed around this forum and found this thread were a guy had vaginal sex for 3 minutes before pushing her off. why do you call this encounter a low risk? again-just curious, iīve decided to learn from this while i worry. (at least iīm posting in my own thread my lymphnodes have swelled on my left side as well( the side i haveīnt touched) could a little cut in my hairline cause this? i canīt seem to figure out where the swelling comes from. scary...i canīt wait to test out.

yeah, i try to tell myself that. they could as well be caused by zits. should i find it calming that i haveīnt had any fever? all iīve experienced as possible symptoms is mildly sore throat, buzzing fingers/arm and lymphnodes under my cheek. (these possible symptoms makes me think that perhaps i "dipped" her in my drunken state.)

is there any threads where people with swollen lymphnodes continue to test negative?

god, would i like to move on. iīd love to just forget about this and continue living, to concentrate on a good book, start hitting on girls again...i just donīt know what to think about my weird buzzing limbs & swollen lymphnodes. and sitting here playing anxious guitar isnīt helping. your words are though. thanks for all the support. iīll try not to post here as soon as i get worried. iīm really going to need this site while waiting for my results later on.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

thing is, i was in a drunken state and may have dipped her in my excitement, no sex, just a possible dip, even though i doubt this myself, it is a possibillity. and i wonīt post here like i did in the beginning, when i was anxious out of my mind. iīll try to stay cool. and like i said, i would like to post a little for support when my test is nigh.

iīm very allergic right now for some reason(swollen throat, red eyes, runny nose,chilly, think i might have a fever. this is too late to be ARS, right? round 7-8 weeks past exposure ( if i in theory would be infected)

does this seem like ARS? it just seems strange that this happens to me since my exposure that i think was a no-risk. If this wasīnt a no-risk. in theory or if i actually did some vaginal in drunken state, could this be ARS? still a month until i can test out. i know you are tired of me but please give me a straight/honest answer.