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Heavy

I feel like my uterus, my body is singing this song to me right now.

That pretty much sums up endo and PCOS. It can literally and figuratively weigh down on you and drain you. It can leave you feeling like you’re drowning in a river. It’s definitely a killer in the crowd, sneaking up on you at random moments and just killing the fuck out of your body’s systems. I know that song’s supposed to be about love but damn, there is some unhealthy love out there in the world. When my uterus is loving me by spitting out blood with which to tie my organs together, when my nerves are misfiring because they’re damaged from all the long-term pain, when I suddenly feel lethargic and depressed because my hormones are not at the correct levels it can seem like the worst kind of marriage ever.

But it’s not all bad. I’ve been writing up a storm and preparing some lovely books to share with you. Er, if you want to read them, that is. With the exception of The Colds, the other books being published this year are much heavier. They deal with darker subject matter and are particularly close to my heart. They contain things about myself that I was never brave enough to share when I was younger. Most of them were written during rather traumatic periods of my life. They were how I made it through.

I should note, though, that simply because they deal with trauma and heavy subjects it doesn’t mean they don’t get as silly, entertaining, or sexy as my other works. These books fill in a lot of background for the rest of the cuilverse. They detail the history for some of its creatures and characters. And they bring together some people you’d never imagine would meet. As well as hint at some pretty messed up shit coming down on the heads of all the creatures of the cuilverse. Such good fun. Maybe I’m having a little too much fun getting all these ready. I’m just so excited about it. The writing styles are different and you’ll even get to see a bit of that flowery language that I’d swear I’d never write.

All in all, as heavy as things in my life seem to be right now, I can honestly say my soul is feeling light.