Date: Fri, 28 Sep 2001 02:07:21 -0400 (EDT)
From: jerket nova
Subject: A Long Time Coming
Jim and I were college roomates, best friends and as
close as two guys could be. We used to joke that we
were so close that the only way we could ever get
closer would be to start "sleeping" together, but that
was never going to happen. When we would sit and
drink, just the two of us, listening to our rock
albums and solving the problems of the world, the talk
would sometimes turn to sex, we were young men, and we
would agree that the day would come when if we didn't
stop spending time with only each other, we would end
up having sex. This was the eighties, anything goes
type stuff. We were so close, closer than brothers, I
imagine. Then we would tumble into Jim's bed and
sleep it off, sometimes waking up with our arms around
each other, his head on my shoulder, my arm across his
waist, but nothing more. Jim always said that when it
was time, when he was ready, he would say so, I think
he knew that there would be no argument from me. Jim
was always the more macho of the two of us, more
athletic, better looking, taller, stronger,
straighter. I was artsy, open minded and small of
stature, I guess we both knew that I was more likely
to "come over to the dark side". Whenever we
discussed homosexuality, he was vehemently opposed and
I was understanding. Over the years I managed to open
his mind somewhat to the point where he even told me
once about a wet dream he had involving us together,
man, that was the turn on that caused me some crises,
caused me to see him as more than a friend, to get
turned on by him, to dream of him, for the first time.
Caused me to see him as a potential homosexual
partner, a new thought that took some getting used to.
But he did turn me on, and no man had before, and
never has since. Just this one fucking guy who seemed
to be unaware of the effect he had on me. If he knew,
I'm sure he wouldn't have kept teasing me.
But nothing happened, ever, just talk. And then we
drifted apart for 20 years, until last spring when we
found each other on e-mail.
I had been married for 18 of those years, with three
kids, Jim had been married, divorced, no kids, and was
living with a girl back in our home town. Not long
ago I had occasion to be in town on business, so after
I visited my parents, I looked Jim up in the phone
book, called him and said I was coming right over.
We greeted each other with a big hug, Jim was always
the best hugger, he would squeeze me so tight, and my
face always ended up in his chest. His girlfriend was
out of town on business, so I wasn't going to get to
meet her this time.
After catching up, and getting used to the way each
other looked now, receding hair lines, a few grey
hairs, a few laugh lines, a couple of pounds heavier,
we put on some classic rock CDs and had a few drinks
and set about solving the problems of the world. Not
long into the evening, I knew that if I had too many
more drinks I would not be able to drive. A few
drinks after that, I didn't care. Sometime later, Jim
realized it too and told me I was going to have to
stay the night. No argument from me, it would be just
like old times. I called my wife and told her my
plans just in case she tried to call me at the hotel
and I wasn't there. We kept on drinking and talking
and enjoying each other's company.
In the wee hours of the morning, I told him I was
bushed and I had to get some sleep because of my
meeting in the morning and the long drive ahead of me
after that. I asked him if I could take a shower, he
said I could go first and then after his shower he
would go over the sleeping arrangements.
I got under the warm spray and started to chuckle at
being once again drunk in Jim's shower. Leaning
against the wall, I looked down and saw that my dick
was starting to rise at the exitement of seeing him
again, I started to stroke it then I stopped myself.
So many times after sitting up drinking and talking
with Jim I found myself so horny that I had to jerk
off in the shower just to make sure I didn't do
anything to him in my sleep that would cost me my
friendship. Jim had to have known, I was in there so
long and he always got a cold shower because I used up
the hot water. There was no way I was doing it again
tonight at 45 years of age, with him waiting outside
the door for me to finish. Besides, I hadn't locked
the bathroom door, he had one of those see through
shower stalls, and there was no way I was going to get
caught yanking it if he decided to walk in. We never
locked the door when we lived together, either of us
would just walk in even if the other guy was in the
shower, sometimes just to talk, or say goodbye when we
left for school. There was never any inhibitions
about being naked in front of each other, nothing
sexual about it all, just natural. I turned on the
cold water, which made my hardon go away, but only
made me more awake and more horny. I stepped out of
the shower and looked at myself in the full length
mirror on the back of the bathroom door. "Not bad", I
thought, and wrapped a towel around me, sucking in my
waist just to be sure I looked good in front of Jim.
I had kept myself in good shape, working out, jogging.
I looked good and in some way Jim and I were still
competing in spite of our friendship.
I opened the door and Jim was just coming out of his
bedroom in his robe, with a towel around his neck. He
told me to wait for him in his room, he'd only be a
minute.
I went into his room, and the memories flooded back,
this was unmistakably Jim's room. He had none of the
old furniture he had when we shared an apartment, but
the style was all him, so different from me. One
thing we had always agreed on was how much we liked
and respected each other, and over time that had grown
into love, which we freely expressed to each other
when the situation called for it. And always we
agreed that it wouldn't surprise either of us if one
day we would have sex together. Some day. Some day.
Jim once said that when we were all grown up and
married, our wives would have to understand when we
went up north to a fishing cabin together once a year,
without them. I guess the idea was that we would keep
our affair over the years, but we still weren't doing
anything except talking about it, and I was getting
more turned on and confused every day. Did he want me
to make a move or not? Why didn't he ever make a
move?
I was lost in my memories when Jim came into the room,
shocking me back to reality. He was wearing only his
towel, carrying his robe which he threw over a chair.
He looked great! I thought I had kept myself in
shape, this guy looked ready for the cover of one of
those men's magazines. He always did look good, but
man, this was incredible. Nice biceps, good pecs,
smooth stomach, great thighs and calves, and rock hard
glutes. In the dim light of the bedside lamp, it was
almost too much to take in, and Christ if I wasn't
getting turned on again. He walked over to the other
side of his bed, and told me I had a choice. He was
too tired to make up the pull-out couch in the
computer room, but I could do it if I wanted to; or I
could just crash with him. I said I would just crash
with him, I'd done that enough times before, and asked
to borrow a pair of gym shorts to sleep in. What
happened next was just the first of many surprises for
both of us.
Jim dropped his towel and got into bed, naked. He
propped himself up on one elbow, the sheet down to his
waist, a smile on his face, he looked like a god.
"It's time for you to fish or cut bait, Jay", he said.
"You never could make a move when it came to me. Are
you getting into bed or not?" I hadn't seen his dick,
I had no idea whether he was hard, or just slept in
the nude. Was this going to be sex, or was I once
again being teased? Sometimes I can be so naive. But
I was still plagued with fear even after all these
years, what if I made the wrong move and got outed?
Jim was the only guy who had ever turned me on, the
only guy I ever dreamed about or really wanted to have
sex with.
I wanted to protest, but it was true, I never had made
a move, and he knew I had jerked myself off 3 times a
day when we lived together, because of him. He knew.
My dick started to fill up, and I felt queasy with
excitement. After 20 years, was this really
happening? I dropped my towel and jumped under the
covers before I got a full hardon, I didn't want to
look like an idiot standing there with my dick
sticking out. And I lay there not knowing what, if
anything, would happen next.
Jim reached over and turned off the lamp. More
memories! Jim just had to have everything pitch black
when he slept, he had the blinds down here and there
was absolutely no light in the room. I couldn't see a
thing. I swear my heart was pounding so hard he must
have heard it. He got back up on his elbow, I could
feel his breath on my face as he looked down on me.
"The truth is, Jay, I was ready a lot sooner than you
think, you just needed to make your move. I knew that
would take you some time, I was prepared to wait, but
I had no idea it would take this long. And I'm still
waiting..."
Suddenly I reached up in the dark, and grabbed him by
the back of the head and pulled him down to me. I
kissed him forcefully on the lips, another first. I
just wanted to shock him, make him stop talking, show
him I could make a decision. I figured either this
would surprise him enough to shut up and let me get
some sleep, or he would realize he had pushed me too
far, teased me too much, and I was getting serious,
and we might end up in a bit of mutual masturbation
and that would be the end of it. At this point I
didn't really care anymore which it would be, but I
hoped that he wouldn't discover my raging hardon if he
had no intention of doing anything about it. I let go
of him and broke the kiss.
He leaned back, and I waited. He surprised the hell
out of me when he came back a second later with a
passion, and started kissing me like we were a couple
of teenagers in the back seat of his car. He shifted
so that he was laying on his stomach, across the bed
on an angle to me, he moved his arm under my neck, and
layed across my chest. In this position I could only
put my free arm around his back, and I discovered I
could only reach down as far as his ass. Any time I
started to explore, he made no move to accomodate. It
was like he didn't want me to touch him. Jim, on the
other hand, had me flat on my back, pinned down with
free access to my body, which he was proceeding to
take advantage of.
His hand moved down my chest, my side, my hips, across
my stomach, the inside of my thighs, all the while he
never stopped kissing me deeply. I felt like such a
woman, completely at his mercy, not a little scared.
Finally he brushed my straining erection with the
underside of his forearm, he let out a little chuckle,
then wrapped his whole hand over top of my cock and
balls. I let out a moan, so did he, and he started to
feel by bag, my pubic hair, he started to stroke me.
It was all too much, and I couldn't breathe from the
excitement, neither could he and we finally broke the
kiss. He panted into my neck, then started to kiss my
chest, down my stomach. He freed his arm from under
my neck, and I just laid back on the pillow, massaging
his back, head back, gasping for air, totally in
disbelief. My best friend, the guy I had wanted
forever, was about to go down on ME, not the other way
around. In all my fantasies and dreams, I had never
once considered that I would be on the receiving side,
it was always supposed to be me doing him. It was
more than I could take. He hadn't even moved into the
classic 69 position, he was just going to let me lie
there while he did me. And then his tongue found my
penis, my sac, and after some nuzzling and teasing, he
took my cock into his mouth.
It was more than I could take, and after a few minutes
of fellatio I just had to have him too. 20 years and
we're finally getting it on and I still hadn't touched
his cock, hadn't seen him erect, I had to have it. I
pulled him off me and I said, "let me." I rolled him
over on his back, got up on my hands and knees, and
started sucking and kissing and licking my way down
him like he had done to me. He had a good grip on my
cock and balls, and was massaging me the whole time.
After a long route around his inner thighs I decided
to take the plunge, and I grabbed his erect cock with
my hand. It seemed huge, but I couldn't see a thing,
and I supposed everything seems bigger in the dark.
It's not like I had a lot of experience with other
guy's erect penises, I was only used to mine in my
hand. I had never seen Jim with an erection, flaccid
he was about my size, maybe a little bigger or
smaller, I had never given it any thought. I decided
that I didn't care if it made me officially gay, I was
going to give him a blow job. I took a deep breath,
then went down on his cock.
He never let go of my genitals, squeezing them,
pulling them, massaging me, masturbating me, but Jim
never made an attempt to guide me into the 69
position. Instead he just let me bob up and down on
his dick, at first with my hands on the bed beside his
waist, but as I grew bolder, holding on to his cock
and jerking him while I sucked. Occasionally he'd
interrupt, "teeth" or "easy", until I got the hang of
keeping my mouth open that wide, that long. The
secret was to relax.
After a while it all started to get a little
mechanical, and my neck was getting sore. I took a
break and laid down beside him, he never let go of my
cock, and stroked me slowly. "Tired?", he asked. I
told him I needed to try something different. So I
set up the pillows against the head board, laid on my
back, and guided him on to me. His knees were on
either side of my chest, his thighs in my armpits, and
I gently took his erect cock into my mouth again. Now
I could control him a bit, hanging on to his ass or
his hips, and he had to pump me instead of me going up
and down on him. Besides, this way my tongue was on
the underside of his cock, which to me always feels
better, and I wanted to give the best blow job
possible. He pumped in and out of me, and we took a
few breaks when my mouth got sore, he would sit back
on my lap and rock against my cock while I kept him
up, jerking and feeling him. I thought I'd died and
gone to heaven, it felt so great.
When we resumed after my break, he told me he was
close, and he wanted to finish up with no more breaks.
He said he'd let me know when he was going to come so
I could stop sucking him if I wanted to. I honestly
didn't know what I would do, it was a little scary.
Jim started pumping my mouth, and this time it felt
different, like he was on a mission or something. I
could feel his breath on the top of my head as he bent
over, I could hear him moaning quietly, and then he
started to say "Oh man" and "Jesus" and "Oh fuck" and
then "soon, soon,oh man, I'm gonna come!" I decided
to ride it out, even thought at this point he was
ramming it into my throat, I could feel his balls
against my chin, my nose was pressed into his abdomen,
in his pubic hair. I squeezed his ass hard, and
reached up his stomach and grabbed his pecs. He held
on to my head, let out a noise, and then I felt the
first spurt of hot come shoot into my mouth. I
hesitated and then the second shot came, and I knew I
had to start swallowing fast. By then it didn't make
much difference because he was shooting straight down
my throat, and I was determined to not gag or back off
at all, I was going to take it like a man. He just
kept repeating "Oh fuck" until finally he slowed down.
I did my best not to move at all, I didn't want to
touch his sensitive head with my tongue or my teeth, I
knew how that felt. His cock started to go limp in my
mouth, and he pulled it out and then fell over on the
bed beside me.
I just lay there gasping for air. "You need to go to
the bathroom, Jay?" he asked, "you can spit and rinse
in there." I think I surprised him when I said that I
was OK, he thought I had a mouth full of come, but
like a true fag, I had swallowed it.
"That was the best, man, thank you!" Jim said in the
darkness. I just grunted, exhausted and shell
shocked. I felt his hand on my semi hardon. That
surprised me, I thought we were done. It never
occurred to me that he would want more. "Your turn,
man, but I don't think I can do for you what you just
did for me. Not this time."
"Your turn, relax and enjoy, let me..." He put his
arm under my neck, and slowly masturbated me with his
free hand. You know, all the things I've done in bed
and I still enjoy a good handjob once in a while.
This was one of the best, not to tight a grip, and a
steady consistent motion. Soon I found myself burying
my head into his neck and arching my hips as I shot
buckets into the towel he had put over my stomach. He
kept stroking until he was sure I was done, then
gently cleaned me up.
I fell asleep in his arms. The next morning I got up
and hit the showers. When I came out, he was in his
robe in the kitchen, making coffee. I got dressed and
met him as I said goodbye, wondering if we were
supposed to not mention last night. He handed me a
travel mug of hot coffee, and gave me a hug. "That
was a long time coming, let's not wait another 20
years."
I don't plan to.