Sorry to see this never really hit its groove. Thought everyone that participated did an awesome job and I've enjoyed reading all the work submitted. It's clear alot of time and effort went into this, from everyone involved.

Just wanted to say a HUGE THANK YOU to V for organizing... a big THANK YOU to the three Judges for taking the time out to read all of the entries and a MASSIVE THANK YOU to my competitor Roshiq - I always enjoy hearing your responses on this forum and your creative posts are always inspiring.

I tried my best, but got really frustrated when it was just Roshiq and I competing. I'm frustrated with the participants who volunteered but then didn't actually show up. I enjoyed the last HDC Idol and truly enjoyed what we had of this one.

I just wanted to make sure that V, The Judges, and Roshiq don't feel as though their efforts have been overlooked. I truly appreciate the effort and the experience. Sorry that it petered out.

Think of a suitable script/storyline for an effective horror short film of around 30 minutes (maximum). You may adapt a short horror story for your short film provided the length of your short film does not exceed 30 minutes in total.

Roshiq's entry -

Quote:

The Terror in the Trunk

In the opening title background we'll see 2 newspaper clips:

1) "January 14: A young woman's suffocated dead body found in the trunk of her car after 3 days!"
2) "February 10: Police have no progress in 'City Apartment's NATASHA GILBERT MURDER CASE!"

Along with the newspaper clips there's also some cut to cut blurry shots...about someone killing a young woman in the back of a car...trying to suffocate her by tightly wrapping her whole face with a polythene/plastic bag and finally leaving the dead body in the trunk of the car.

After the completion of opening titles, the film will start with (as the camera is focusing on) a notice or flyer: "WE deeply mourned for the untimely & shattering death of our beloved neighbor (flat 4C) Ms. Natasha Gilbert on January 14, 2011 in our parking garage area. We demand justice...".
Then as the camera starts to zoom out or moving backwards we'll see that bit tear out flyer/notice is actually glued to a pillar of a (may be underground) car parking lot. Now, just besides that pillar someone is parking a car in a signed car parking spot. After finely parking the car a young man comes out from the driving seat with a big grocery bag, makes sure the car has locked properly and then starts to walk.
It's somewhat dark in the whole parking area. Some light bulbs aren't working, some are blinking.
Just after passing only one or 2 cars on his left (next to his car) there's a strange sound (DHUUP!) comes from near by somewhere, which at first that young man doesn't hear/notice. But then the 2nd time when it repeats twice (DHUP-DHUP!) then the young man stops walking, looks around & tries to locate the sound but sees or hear nothing.
Just when he's about to give a step to start walking again then the sound repeats 3 times (DHUP-DHUP-DHUP!). This time the sound is more clear & louder. And it also becomes clear that it's actually somewhat like a sound of knocking...on a car's door...but from inside a car.
The whole parking lot is almost filled up with cars, only 1 or 2 spots are left. The sound is coming from one of these parked down cars. Particularly, the car that's just right next to him. The young man put downs the grocery bag on the hood of that car...a black Lexus CT. He tries to look inside of the black window glasses but can't see anything. Then the sound repeats more loudly and now there's no doubt left for him to realize that the sound is actually coming from the back of the car...from the trunk.
"Hello?...anybody there...?" he goes close to the trunk, the knocking sound from inside the trunk continues.
As he's about to put his hand or give a knock on the trunk, he now clearly hears that someone is groaning in pain inside the trunk. Someone is locked in the trunk.
Suddenly the knocking sound from inside the truck spreads all over the parking lot. It's now like every car in the parking lot has someone locked inside its trunk. Along with that loud knocking sounds coming inside the trunks now there are also some car alarms joins to the freaking chorus. As the freaked out young man quickly comes out from the back of that car, all of the freaking chorus of knocking inside the trunk doors & car alarms suddenly stops by the sound of a car's tire skidding inside the parking lot. The young man now sees a speedy car is coming towards him. He can't see the face of the driver as the headlights are on deeper or turning on too bright.
"Hey, stop!" The young man waves his hand & signals the driver but when the car comes close to him then the young man realizes that the driver on that car has no intention to respond positively or stops by; instead crashing him off. At the very last moment the young man manages to save himself by jumping off on the hood of the Lexus (the car where the knocking sound first came out & he just inspected). The grocery bag falls & the things on the grocery bag spreads all over the places. The speedy car with bright lights passes him. The young man slowly slips down from the hood & falls on the ground.

"Hey! You freak bastard...!" The young man yells & tries to stand up but get freaked out again as soon as he give a look on the back of that running speedy car. A young woman is somewhat like trying to coming out from the trunk of that running car...by pulling up the trunk door in one hand & trying to scream but seems groan mildly as her whole face is wrapped with a polythene/plastic bag. The car turns left to the way that goes outside the apartment building & runs away.

The camera moves back to the young man. He's looking very much shocked about the whole experience. He seats down on the ground and on his back there's that Lexus CT (...the car where it all started). But there's one thing changed. The car somehow turned 180 degree...means, the young man is seating not in front of the car; the back (the trunk side) of the car is behind him now. Suddenly the trunk door opens and the young man gets a hit on his back by that/the trunk door. A woman, groaning, whose face is wrapped with a polythene/plastic bag (same like the previous one in that speedy car) comes out from the dark of the trunk and grabs him from behind and slowly starts to take him inside the trunk. It's like there's an endless big dark hole in the trunk. The young man struggles & tries to scream but fails to do that as the ghost of Natasha Gilbert is holding his neck very tightly with one hand.
We see the next shot through the security camera (with night vision on) from a distance, as the camera is like placed on a top of a pillar of the parking lot: The young man is taking forcefully inside the trunk of a car (Lexus CT) by something which is not clear either for the lack of the lights in the parking lot or something by an invisible entity.
Last Shot: The camera is focusing the open trunk of the car. The young man is almost in there inside the truck. Both of his legs trembles on the air for the last couple of seconds before gone lost completely inside the trunk. In a POV style, as the camera quickly moves towards the trunk (like a hope to have a look inside of the trunk) the trunk door shuts down. And instead having any numbers...we see there are these 2 words written on the number plate with a big question mark: THE END?

----***----

Notes: I'm not sure how much clearly I have able to explain the events in the story but I think it won't take more than 5 to 7 minutes of time IF it is being made into a short film. May be the story kinda looks or sounds like somewhat JU-ONish as my intention is to create an open ended story/film which can be explain or work out further into some more sequels of this short films or in a full length feature film. The events in the film or some parts may be needed some explanation or left some unanswered questions but the thing is my intention was to create a story with uneven or bit strange ghostly encounters as I think - not all the ghostly encounters happens with a logical or sensible flow of events. It's mainly all about the fear of unknown where someone experiences some unexpected, weird & terrifying moments of terror with or without a safe escape at the end.

Judge #1's verdict -

Quote:

This would make a good, shocking short film. I like the ambiguity at the end, and, as you say, it could be continued in more episodes, where next the man and the girl come back and get another victim, and then another, till there is a horde of ghosts haunting the parking garage and they won't be satisfied till the killer is brought to justice.

I give it an A.

Judge #2's verdict -

Quote:

I hate to do this, but I give roshiq a D.
Not very clear writing, I found it very confusing and hard to follow.

Judge #3's verdict -

Quote:

I give this a B-.

I like the reinterpretation of a very traditional ghost story. But, I think you would have benefited from not starting with the reveal. Move that to the end. As you said, you want to create the fear of the unknown, but you've given people a known quantity from the beginning. Horror is about the unexplained. One of the worst things Hollywood has done to the genre is drowned it in exposition. Continue to explore bolder, more distinctive terrors, to riff on the things you love and build a unique voice.

Overall Grade - B-

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"If you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." - Friedrich Nietzsche