On This Day -

Spoof news events on this day in history

London - On the eve of his autobiographical release "Man in the Middle," former professional basketball player, John Amaechi called an urgent press conference to make an announcement regarding the allegations made about his homosexuality.

President Barack Obama finally released a copy of his birth certificate that shows he was born in a hospital in Honolulu this morning.
However, there was a mix-up as Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi also released a copy of Obama's birth certifica...

NEW YORK (AP) - "We, at the New York Times, believe that the time is right for the introduction of a licence fee to support our continuing activities," remarked Janet L. Robinson, President and Chief Executive Officer, of the prominent...

A spokesman for actress Kristen Stewart has announced that the young actress from the Twilight movies has signed a business contract with Haralds of Hollywood for them to do a line of panties that will be out during the coming summer.
"We are very...

Justin Bieber may say that he and Selena Gomez are not an item but that didn't keep the singer from sending her twenty bouquets of flowers and some weird socks for Valentine's Day according to friends of Gomez.
"Wow. Justin Bieber really knows how...

Gordon Brown has been all over the country's press recently, for allegedly bullying staff at Number 10. Many are reported to have called a Bullying Helpline.
In cases like these, it is necessary to go deeper than the superficial reports, excuses a...

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has called on his states Attorney General Bill Lockyer to issue a ban on gay marriage, calling it "An imminent threat to Civil Order." In a statement issued from the Governors Mansion in Sacramento the former...

Houston, Texas -- As gasoline prices ratchet up past the $4-a-gallon mark, the oil industry is preparing a more luxurious way to present its increasingly costly product to consumers.
"Think expensive fragrances, top-shelf liquor and premium cosmet...

Conventional science believes viruses can 'jump' from one species of animal to another.
Conspiracy theorist scientists believe that the greatest threat to humanity lies with killer viruses from outer space.
One leading scientist who believes th...

In a shocking turn of events at The Greatest Only-est Online Susa-show on Earth (GOOSE), forum administrator Jack Schiedt placed a two-week ban upon himself for violating one of his own rules.
Admin Schiedt realized, only after posting, that one o...

Federal investigatory sources indicate a Texas tycoon accused of an $8 billion investment fraud may have swindled the New York inventor of an alleged $50 billion Ponzi scheme.
The sources say Allen Stanford-accused by the feds of running a "mass...

The second husband and cage-fighting transvestite belonging to businesswoman Katie Price, has revealed how he is happy to take his wife's name.
Dressed in a tiara and bikini whilst promoting her latest autobiography 31 year old glamour model Katie...

In totally unrelated transatlantic transactions, Skoob Entertainment News supremo (who grovelled like a whimpering puppy to keep his job) Buffty Ginslinger, has related that in an amazing coincidence, US teen idol Miley Cyrus and Manchester United st...

Alonzo Dennard has been convicted and will not collect $200 even if his piece was the recently retired Monopoly iron.
Unlike the New England Patriots, the Boston Red Sox cannot get arrested. Patriot players routinely seem to end up in the judicial...

Due to a spate of boring publicity regarding Prince Harry, Carol Thatcher, Jonathon Ross and others using racist language, British journalists have declared their reticence to quote celebrities.
The British Legion Of Writers Just Out of Brighton (...

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