So you're the rest of the America. You're not a chowderhead, you don't live anywhere near Beantown and you don't worship the very ground that Tom Brady hobbles around on. You hate all things New England Patriots, from the quarterback's walking boot to the coach's grubby hoodie.

Well, we're here as part of the Anti-Patriot Defamation League, ready to trumpet all that is good about the NFL's reigning dynasty, and there is much to love.

Now you may say they are a team that only a mother could love — yeah, Lizzie Borden's mom.

But you are wrong. Forget what you're hearing from those cranky, old Miami Dolphins crybabies. Who cares if Bill Belichick had too much fun a while back with his birthday-gift camcorder? There is plenty of warm, cuddly stuff about this New England team, and we're not talking Brady's little black book.

So with apologies to the New York Giants, here's why you should root for the good-guy Patriots in Sunday's Super Bowl, and every bit of this infomercial is 100 percent true: