Heisman Trophy winner Kyler Murray apologized Sunday for homophobic tweets he posted when he was fourteen years old. The young man is truly sorry. It's cost him his lifelong dream of being the first man in history to play the Oscars.

The Oscars may forego a host because so many comics post tweets that rile women, gays and minorities. We know how this ends. The Academy of Motion Pictures is considering disbanding because they've just realized every time they hand out an award, the people who lost will get offended.

The San Jose Mercury News reports that California regulators are considering levying a state tax on every text message sent in the state of California. A tax on texts could be very risky. If you thought the murder rate in L.A. was already high, wait until people have to start breaking up in person.

Michael Cohen told ABC News Friday he paid off Trump's mistresses in order to affect the 2016 election. It was important they be kept secret. If Americans had only known that Donald Trump was a womanizer who paid off mistresses, he'd have been a shoo-in for the Kennedy Honors.

The Affordable Care Act was ruled unconstitutional by a Texas federal judge who agreed that the requirement to buy it, now excised by U.S. law, made it moot. I never understood how English-speaking people whose rights are rooted in the Magna Carta could be forced by the state to buy something. This morning IHOP introduced a new breakfast item called the Obama Legacy. It's toast.

FBI former director James Comey performed another aria in the hallways of Congress while taking press questions on his FISA testimony. Comey will go down as the FBI's greatest drama queen since J. Edgar Hoover. FBI groupies can only speculate how tall Comey would be in high heels.

Iowa Democratic voters were polled about their presidential preferences for the 2020 election. And wouldn't you know, the two favorite candidates are Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders. Apparently the Democratic Party's political strategy to get rid of old white men is to run them to death.

Michael Cohen said Trump instructed him to pay off his mistresses in 2016. Cohen acts like it was big secret that Trump was a womanizer, and revealing that stunning news might have affected the presidential election. It would have changed Trump's campaign motto to Make America J.F.K. Again

There are no "Socialists", no "Progressives", only Communists, with every negative image that totalitarianism might muster, demanding fealty and conformity to their views, with a legacy of 150,000,000 dead and counting.

In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.�More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.�-Woody AllenIf God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise.