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Month: July 2016

Unplanned LOTR marathon while we were in Malaysia. I’m glad that I do like it now even though I don’t remember it very fondly when my brothers watched them so many times when we were younger. It is indeed an amazing film, the quality and details that go into everything.

Still a little disappointed that Legolas didn’t look younger in the Hobbit, ha. And favourite characters for me? Sam (what a tough character in the book, MVPPPPPP), Merry, Legolas and Aragorn.

“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.”

So why are we still fixated on measuring how much of an adult we are by how closely we’re falling in line with the values of the generations that preceded ours?

Because the truth about the concept of ‘adulting’ is that if you have to measure it by which possessions you own and which milestone you’ve hit, you’re probably coming at it from a place of intense insecurity.

Being an adult doesn’t mean having a pinterest-porn living room and an engagement ring resting on your finger.

Being an adult means knowing yourself. It means listening to your own needs. It means understanding which kind of lifestyle you want to be living and then pursuing it unapologetically.

Sometimes being an adult means getting married and having a kid, but other times it means the total opposite. Sometimes it means traveling long-term. Sometimes it means frequent career shifts. Sometimes, being an adult just means having the bravery to say, ‘I choose the life that I want over the life that I’m expected to have and I’m happy with that. I’m living with my own definition of integrity.’

Because at the end of the day, the most mature thing any of us can ever do is to know ourselves. To trust ourselves. To understand that even when our wants and needs differ from the desires of the people around us, they’re still valid. They’re still meaningful. They’re still there.

And to allow ourselves the honesty to grow into the exact kind of adult that we want to become.

Woke up from a bad dream… no idea why did I even dream of the subjects involved. But I guess it prompted me to pen these.

I really miss going out on dates and spending my abundant time now with someone special. It’s annoying because I really have a lot of time now, not like a few years ago when my holidays are held up by my responsibilities e.g. internships, or when the other party is tied up too by other responsibilities. Not that I don’t have any responsibilities now but this is honestly the last big break that I have? I miss spending my free time having someone to bake for, to plan surprises, to dress up specially for… and a lot more. I know I can spend this time with my friends too, and I am going to use this time to finally catch up!!! but spending it with a special someone is different. And I miss that. I just hope that I get to experience it again. A love that is free and not restricted, when both our priority is each other’s happiness and well-being at the same time.

Part of me is really really afraid that I won’t get to experience it.

Feel like i’m missing out on an experience that will teach me a lot, which I need to learn at this age.

I should be spending this time travelling and exploring places and experiencing what it’s like to be together for more than 24 hours.

But it’s okay, didn’t realise that I’ve been single for close to 2 years now. It’s good that I am too.