When your at a place in your life when all you thought you ever wanted is here.

But then its not. It’s hard. It’s not at all what I anticipated.. it’s better…and worse at the same time.

What do you do?

Keep going? Push forward.. move on. Be here. Be in the moment. Live for today. I get it. We can only do what we can do.

But there has to be more..

More to this life then waking up to pay bills and then die…

When does life start?

When does the real meaning of life come into play? Or has it already?

I want the world to be happy. To be fullfilled. To be sane. To be loved. To be fixed.. to not feel broken. To not feel lost..

But how do I do that when at the core I am as broken as the next person?

Maybe broken and lost is exactly where I was meant to be. Maybe that IS my purpose. Maybe to be lost and broken is exactly where and what I was meant to be.. to show the power to overcome.

I mean.. if I can make it through ten years of some of the worst possible times of my life.. I can make it through this right?

Of course I can. And I will be doing so with the mentality that to be broken… Is to be perfect. To be lost… Is only a matter of perception.. my perception of being lost in this world is exactly where I want to be because to be found in this world, to me, would be a far greater disservice to myself because of what the world stands for.

I’m lost… Don’t Find me…

I’m broken… No need to tame..

I’m he’re… In this present moment..

To live. To laugh. To love.And finally.. To shine my light of broken and lostness… To show that to be broken and lost… Isn’t the end… It’s only the beginning of something…