Sweeping Isn’t Minnesota Nice

[ UPDATE: 6/17 — Twins are now 2-9 in “sweep” games — where winning the final game of a series would give them a sweep. On one hand, it’s good that they’ve had so many sweep opportunities — but 2 outta 9? Original Post of 4/26 follows:]

Oh, there you go there, Twins. Yer doing real good. Got a two-and-a-half game lead in the Central. Don’t cha know how proud I am of you, winning six straight series and never hurtin’ anybody’s feelings by sweeping them.

Oh, fer nice, ya guys. Just downright Minnesota Nice.

I mean four times all you had to do is win one game and you could have humiliated your opponent with a series sweep. But you had a good upbringing, I tell ya. No need to rub the other team’s nose in it. Those Kansas City Royals, they got feelings too, you know.

Winning two out of three is above-average enough. I’m just so pragmatically happy that yer going out there and doing what needs to be done to win a series and then stopping there. Not getting too big for your britches. Like they say, you just might see those on the way back down that you pass on your way up. Wouldn’t you want the White Sox to let you win a series too sometime down the line, so that you can feel good on a plane trip home.

There’s more to life than a few more wins, you know. Don’tcha know that? This season is supposed to be a no rough stuff deal. The next thing you know, there’ll be Jon Rauch standing there with Nick Punto in the wood chipper. And for what? A few more wins?

And there ya’ll be and it will be a beautiful day at Target Field. And Well, I just won’t understand it.