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Everyone has a self-image, but how does a self-image get built? And what does your self-image have to do with who you are, and how you react in strange or unusual situations?

Your self-image, or your idea of who you are, is a package you put together from how others have seen and treated you, and from your conclusions as you compare yourself to others. Primitive people built homes from available materials – blocks of ice, animal skins, adobe, and logs. In this same way, when you were a child, you built your self-image from what was available.

Your construction materials were the reactions of significant others toward you. So, your self-image is simply a belief system you created. It is manifested in how you respond to the world around you – the people and situations that fill your days. However, these beliefs may or may not be accurate.

Now, your essential nature, the “real you” that exists apart from your behaviour, your opinions, your habits, etc., is really quite wonderful because it is a storehouse of energy and potential that can do and be great things.

But if people, who didn’t have much self-esteem themselves, raised you around constant put-downs, you will not be able to use much of this amazing potential. You see, your behaviour always matches your inner picture of yourself. In this, it makes sense to look at your beliefs, get rid of those that hold you back, and learn how to affirm and tap into your potential.

This same story applies to teams, departments, and entire organisations. In their beginnings, organisations defined themselves by the situation they were in and the lessons learned from interactions with the rest of the world. As time wears on, those definitions were tweaked when necessary, or didn’t change at all because of the core beliefs and values of the organisation. These same beliefs and values may be limiting the potential of the organisation to change and grow.

The good news is that with a little self-reflection – whether by an individual or a group of individuals – old, outdated beliefs can be identified and either modified or completely changed. All it takes is a little bit of time and effort.

You are worth this investment and you deserve the outcomes from the investment.

Do you know what Scotomas are? Everyone has them and they can keep you from seeing the opportunities all around you.

So, what exactly is a “Scotoma?” A scotoma is what doctors call the defect that blocks sight in one part of our visual field. It is also a term we use to describe our occasional failure to see what is right in front of us because we build our own Scotoma, a mental blind spot, to it. And we can create Scotomas for all of our senses.

You see, for the most part, we see what we expect to see or what we look for. We also hear what we expect to hear, taste what we expect to taste, smell what we expect to smell, and sense what we expect when we touch something soft or hard or scratchy. In other words, Scotomas work on our sensory perceptions. So, we do not see, hear, taste, smell or feel what is really there.

What we expect to see/hear/taste/smell/touch is determined by our beliefs about reality. If we believe the world is a hostile, unfriendly place, we will see evidence to support that belief everywhere we look. But if we believe people are basically good and that the world is a supportive, friendly place, then that is what we will see and experience.

Have you ever been in a hurry to get out and you just cannot find your keys? You look everywhere, in a frenzy get more and more frustrated and then somebody comes along and says, “Are these, what you are looking for?” You just know they must have had them all along, as they were not there when you looked. You grab the keys and march off. This is a scotoma in practice.

Our beliefs are mostly a matter of how we have been conditioned, often since birth. But once we become adults, it is possible to become aware of our conditioning, our belief systems, and even our Scotomas. Sometimes, when we discover our Scotomas, when we realise that our conditioning has led us in the wrong direction, it can be quite the jolt to our psyche.

The good news is that we can choose to expand our consciousness, remove our blind spots, and adopt beliefs that will help us grow instead of clinging to expectations and attitudes that keep us suspicious and our worlds small. By the simple act of making this choice, we actually start the wheels turning toward a better future.

By daily affirmation of goals that support our commitment, we become top-notch Scotoma Busters – and that is when we really start to grow!

Most of us worry a bit from time to time, and there are probably a lot of us worrying about the state of the world these days. You know, too much worry is a dangerous thing. You see, our awareness of the future is an important part of our search for meaning and purpose in life. However, when awareness of the future becomes dominated by uneasiness, then restlessness, fear and worry take over.

I read a book many years ago and it had a big impact on me, as it made me look at worry in a different light; very recently I read it again, it is by J. Ruth Gendler, “The Book of Qualities.” Gendler makes “Worry” into a person who seems very real:

“Worry etches lines on people’s foreheads when they are not paying attention. She makes lists of everything that could go wrong while she is waiting for the train. She is sure she left the stove on, and the house is going to explode in her absence. When she makes love, her mind is on the failure rates and health hazards of birth control. The drug companies want worry to test their new tranquilisers, but they don’t understand what she knows too well: no drug can ease her pain. She is terrified of the unknown.”

That is the bad news. The good news is that, just as we manufacture stress by repeatedly looking forward in fear, we can learn to build new habits that replace worry with more constructive, positive thoughts. In taking charge of our own thoughts, we are less at the mercy of other voices that seek to decide, for us, how we think and what we think about. Let’s face it, there is a lot of manipulation going on these days. We want to be very careful to avoid falling into a worry pit.

We can short-circuit the downward spiral of worry and fear and substitute images that will work for us instead of against us. We can learn to do this, because it is happening every day, all over the world.

How is your energy level? Do you sometimes wish you had more get-up-and-go? Today let’s look at how high-energy people get that way

Why is it that some people seem to have a never-ending supply of energy? They get up feeling eager to get started and they radiate good spirits and high energy all day long. Have you ever stopped by the vitamin counter at the pharmacy, wondering what you could take to get that kind of energy?

Consider this: Assuming you are in good health, your strength and energy will come from having meaningful and clear lifetime goals. In other words, a purpose in life. You see, high-energy people know what they want and have an unshakable belief that what they want is possible. They have a purpose that they have chosen freely, and they set goals and develop action plans to help them achieve that purpose.

We mentioned earlier some studies that showed the elderly, with a specific goal or purpose, lived longer than those who did not. You have probably proven to yourself how energetic you have felt when you had even a short-term goal, perhaps a yard work chore like pruning a hedge or putting in a rockery. Even if you hadn’t slept the night before, with the goal at hand, you found yourself with the energy to get the job done. (Now, you may have started losing energy as you were nearing the end of the job, but that’s another story!)

What is your purpose? When it comes to energy, it doesn’t matter so much what you want, as long as you want something. You’d be surprised how energised you can become once you know the answer to this question. When you have chosen your purpose, and you have a clear idea fixed firmly in your mind of what it is you want to be and do, you will be surprised at how your energy level will grow to help you find ways to get there.

Do you ever feel that the people who are closest to you are the ones who resist the most as you try to change for the better? Sometimes, when we are committed to personal growth and change, family members or others who are close to us will do everything they can to try and get us to change back to the way we were – even when the way we were wasn’t so great.

Did you ever wonder why that might be? Well, for one thing, when people are used to heir lives being a certain way, any change – even when it is an improvement – can be threatening. It is also fairly common for people who are stuck in negative habits to have a hard time tolerating others who are making positive efforts towards change.

If you can convince your family to join you in your quest for personal growth, you will all have an easier time of it. You can support each other through the tough times and give each other encouragement and approval as you begin to see results.

If you have no choice but to go through it alone, let those significant others in your life in on what you are trying to do, and tell them how positive results will benefit them well as you. Paint them a vivid word picture of what the end-result will look like, and ask for their help in achieving it.

If you don’t get that help, be patient. It may take time to convince them that you are serious, and that you intend to stay close to them even though you are changing. They may be waiting for proof before allowing themselves to believe you. Belief without evidence is difficult even in the best of times, with the best of people.

If it ever comes down to the difficult choice between continuing a painful relationship and developing yourself as a person, remember that you always have the right to choose growth without guilt. If you want to do better for the world, then you first need to do better by and for yourself.

Looking after yourself is not a luxury, it is a necessity; if you want to be, do and have everything you want in your life.

Have you ever thought about what it takes to bounce back from life’s downturn Today, let’s talk about how to handle those inevitable setbacks that occur from time to time.

No matter how hard we may try, life isn’t perfect. Every day cannot be sunny, our relationships with others cannot always be smooth – and let’s face it, sometimes work is more of a pain than a pleasure. However, it is how we react to those less-than-perfect situations that show us how far we have grown as human beings.

Since most of us spend a significant portion of our lives at some form of workplace, let’s use work as an example. Suppose something has gone drastically wrong, and the whole place looks like everyone is awaiting execution. No one looks up for fear of being called to account for the disaster. The talk around the water cooler is negative, and unless something is done, the entire organisation begins down the slippery slope of the Downward Spiral.

What to do? First, a conscious effort must be made to ensure the organisational self-talk is positive and reaffirming. Your talents and expertise are valued by the organisation, and the work you do is important. Second, the organisation must get beyond the current “disaster” and begin focusing on the future, when the problem no longer exists. And third, forget trying to point fingers and assign blame. As the Blue Angels say, “Fess up, fix it, and move on.”

Affirmations are the most important tool in your Personal Disaster Relief Kit.

As you may know, affirmations are simply present-tense statements of fact – about the future. Affirmations are usually most effective when they are personal, but you cannot beat an organisational affirmation that has total buy-in from everyone. “The whole is greater than the sum of its parts,” so to speak. It becomes the organisation’s “vision” for tomorrow, and leads you through to success.

For yourself personally, you must believe that your contribution to the organisation is valuable. “I am valued by leadership for my talents and expertise.” “I am comfortable expressing my thoughts in meetings, because I know what I have to say is valuable.” As a group, when faced with a challenge, you might affirm, “No matter what gets thrown at us, we hit it out of the park.”

The important thing is to have your mind firmly fixed on the future, the future without the current challenge. Remember, your subconscious mind moves you toward the most dominant picture. If all you are thinking about is the current “disaster,” then you won’t be able to move forward. Keep affirming daily the way you want the future to be, paint it vividly in your mind, and keep your personal self-talk and your group self-talk aimed at a positive future.

We have looked at the value in personal resiliency, and we used the workplace as an example. Now, let’s take what we have been looking at, and transfer it to succeeding through natural disasters.

Every year, the world sees its share of natural disasters, from earthquakes and landslides, to tornados, monsoons and floods. In each instance, the aftermath has been almost unbearable to watch. What happened was outside immediate human control. Nothing we can do – at least at this point in time – can prevent natural disasters like these. All we can do is be as prepared as possible for the unknown.

For most cities, counties, states and nations, we prepare for the practical response. Seattle, sits in the Pacific Ocean’s “Rim of Fire,” they prepare for earthquakes, severe weather and flooding. Seattle’s “3 Days, 3 Ways” programme helps residents prepare to take care of themselves – to survive – for three days.

While the practical approach takes care of the body’s need to survive, we also need to take care of how our minds approach coping with disaster. Rebounding from disaster takes a conscious effort to control our self-talk in order to remain positive. Looking beyond ourselves, by helping others, is a great assist in aiding our own positive self-talk. Making the effort to visualise what our worlds will look like, once the current situation is fixed, provides a path to follow. Reinforcing that vision with positive affirmations goes a long way towards avoiding the pitfalls of a downward spiral.

One more thing: Let others help you, as you help others. The sense of a community working together to solve a problem is a powerful thing. We are stronger together than we are alone, no matter what the obstacle.