When you haven’t been in the dating scene for a few years because you’ve either been taking a break from relationships or were coupled up at the time, it’s difficult to get your head around what it’s like now. For one thing, everything has gone digital. Apps like Tinder lead the way allowing beautiful people to meet their counterpart in an instant. For the modern gentleman, there’s a period of adjustment necessary if you’ve been on the sidelines.

Here are 4 ideas to help you understand how things are now.

1. Get Started with Dating Apps

While you can ask a friend if she knows someone suitable for you, the chances are slim that you’d hit it off. Usually, you need to cast a wider net.

Signing up with some dating apps like Tinder or Bumble will get your photo or video into the smartphones of women looking to meet a new man. You’ll still need to make the first move unless you’re an Adonis, so nothing has changed there.

A great photo and witty banter are required. Don’t be surprised if the interaction is limited on these apps. Women get inundated with messages from likely suitors. They end up having to pick just a handful to send messages back to. It’s easy for them to get distracted and stop communicating.

2. Ghosting and What It Means

Due to the nature of online dating now, women cannot keep up with replying to many people. With many new people contacting a woman, they can get interested in someone new and stop communicating with a person they’ve been writing to over a few days. This is known as ‘ghosting’.

In a sense, it’s not personal. It’s just the way it is now. Try to develop a thicker skin as it’ll happen to you when you least expect it.

3. Not Everyone Wants Something Serious

Dating is more casual than ever. Whereas a few years ago, women tended to want a serious relationship and men were kind of on the fence, that’s changed.

Modern women are not necessarily wanting a serious relationship until they are in their 30s. They’re thinking about their career and having children much later in life compared to previous generations. Therefore, women may enjoy a relaxed relationship with a modern man with no strings attached. For men used to the way things were before, that’s a very confusing change to adjust to.

4. Have a More Flexible Attitude in the Bedroom

Women tend to be more expressive and adventurous in the bedroom now. They will often own one or more vibrators and other toys for personal use. But she may want to spice it up with a vibrator that you can use on her and maybe on yourself too.

If you’ve never been in that situation before, it can feel a bit threatening. Like you’re not enough for her now. But take a step back and realize that women need more stimulation than men to reach orgasm. Often, intercourse doesn’t hit the spot for her. But placing a vibrator on her clitoris and she’s much more likely to get off multiple times. That leads to greater satisfaction in the bedroom for her which is good for both of you.

While you’ll have to mentally and emotionally adjust to modern dating, it’s not that difficult. Certainly, women are more proactive with dating than ever before. Try to take that in stride. It’s nothing personal. Even if you get ghosted here and there. It happens. Find someone new and have better experiences. You’ll both know when you want something more serious.