Purple May Be The Color This Upcoming Season, But It’s Actually Just Leading Us Back To Bell Bottoms

Purple. It’s a difficult color. Although the color of royalty, there are few who can pull it off successfully without looking like some version of Violet Beauregarde after a run-in with Willy Wonka’s new experimental three-course gum. Blue is doable for many; red also, but purple? No thanks.

But as we all learned from The Devil Wears Prada, fashion dictates life and we, as consumers, eat it up. Cerulean blue, anyone? So when Vogue tells you that “in autumn/winter 2012-13 [purple] will be for everyone,” you make a mental note and follow suit, shrug your shoulders because you don’t give a damn, or fight against it because you know it’s wrong. I have chosen to fight against it.

Purple just seems like a horrible throwback to the 70’s that’s bound to circle out of control into hues of oranges and browns and pea green colors that will then evolve into Tupperware conventions and the eventual rebirth of bell bottoms. Can no one see this? Once you have bell bottoms back, then there will be an influx of gabardine and everything that designers of the 80’s and 90’s fought for will have all been in vain, as we find ourselves repeating a past that should be forgotten.

Purple isn’t even a pretty word. It’s on par with “golf,” and reminiscent of a sound that people make when their mouth is full of marbles. Why not violet? Lavender? Why, purple, why? Why take blue and red and make a mess of things? They were so perfect on their own, and never once evoked even the slightest thoughts of bell bottoms. When a color conjures up memories of such a trend, you know it’s a bit wrong.