I'm curious as to what you're planning for the meal service . . . all adults and kids (20ish people) sitting at the same properly set table? With the food items being passed around? Or were you thinking buffet-style?

Without knowing your service plans, I'd like to suggest that a special table be set just for the kids where food is served to them in small kid-friendly portions (kinda-like mommy being the "service maid " for the princess and her guests) and then the adults can mingle with a buffet style service.

I dunno. Maybe I'm over thinking.

It just sounds like the kids (especially your 3-yr. old) might get a bit lost with things like "Condiments for sandwiches - mayo, yellow and dijon mustards, leaf lettuce, onion, tomato sliced thin." or "Hot Spinach/Artichoke Dip? Baguettes" Which is perfectly fine for the adults.

Maybe having a tray of pre-made child-variety finger sandwiches, along with fresh veggies and ranch dip, fruit (wands? Great idea!) would make the tea party a little more special for the dressed up and proper kids at their own table (plus, probably, make things a bit easier on the adults.)

Zilla - Non of our kidlets are jelly eaters however, THANKS!!!!! for the paper cup for dips idea! Fab idea!QueenfaninCA - yes, there are are more adults than kids but I am catering towards the kids tastes. While it's not a "proper tea" all the kids are wearing princess dresses and we're using a lot of crystal and trying to make it seem fancy for the little ones.

I thought my kid was the "strange" one for not liking jelly. lol I guess it's more common. (she refuses to touch any jelly sandiwches and prefers pb ONLY please. )

And I wouldn't worry too much about being proper, these are 3 year olds that will have more fun with the dresses, tea and giggling at each other. Don't forget to save "places" for their teddies/dollies/favorite toy too. I would even make that a party favor too, they have a dress up bear kit you can purchase for parties....

I'd plan to include at least one non-meat sandwich option. (Even if you don't have any vegetarians on your guest list, not everybody likes cold meat.) If you plan is for everyone to assemble their own sandwiches, it probably won't be an issue, as people can likely make something yummy out of veggies and cheese.