Archive for the ‘Nostalgia’ Category

Father: That’s the hotel where your mother and I stayed.Girl: Where?Father, pointing: There. Girl: Is that a hotel?Father: No.Girl: Oh.Father: So, obviously we didn’t stay there. You should learn to listen.

Woman: Once my mom let me go to school, when I was eight, in a training bra and a see-through baby blue crocheted hand-knit sweater that my grandma made.Man: What the fuck?Woman: Yeah. I got made fun of something fierce. That’s when I realized my mom’s a crazy bitch.Man: Heh.Woman: But you know what? I fucking love her. I love that crazy-ass bitch.

Guy: I had to yell at her and tell her that she couldn’t be pregnant — I mean, dude, that was last week.

–St. Marks & 3rd Ave

Preggers to male friend: And that asshole came up and body-slammed me on the train platform! Of course, everyone was looking at me like I’m the animal. How can you body-slam a woman who’s seven months pregnant and not feel bad?

–D train

Overheard by: Jannine Ramlochan

Preggers to lady pushing to get to cupcake table: Lady, I am four months pregnant. Getting between me and those cupcakes is a really, really good way to lose an arm.

–Magnolia Bakery

Snotty actress: Oh my gosh, she is such a good writer for my acting type. Her script is so like, like — pregnant with promise.

–14th & Broadway

Overheard by: Emilia

Girl on phone: No, I can’t have sex with you. Because then if I got pregnant I’d have to be like, ‘Whose baby is it? Well, let’s see — is it black, white, brown…?’

–Grand Central Station

British mother to young son: Do you know what I had to eat when I was pregnant with you, Bill? Buns! Buns! Buns! Buns! That’s why you’re mad about buns. [To daughter] And that’s why you like brown things.

–Varick & King St

Young woman to friends: And she keeps getting pregnant, and I’m like, ‘Stop it, woman!’