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Monday, April 12, 2010

WHATIf?

If you give the Queen a computer……

She will write a Blog!

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If you decide to reign as Queen o’er the Land called Yougetwhatyouaskfor, you must remember it is ye who rules the Castle (although you might want to let Prince Charming think he wears the pants ~ it’s good for his Ego) .

As Queen, it is your responsibility to slaughter villains (know your children‘s friends), punish law breakers (set curfews and chores), reward heroes (acknowledge successes), and protect your territory (home) and its inhabitants (family). If some of your loyal servants (servants, Ha! Good one) are teenagers, spinning yarn into gold would be a good skill to have too, just in case your money tree isn’t hardy enough!! Ye would do well to heed this advice..

Go forth now and rejoice, for ye have the makings for a successful Kingdom!

(P.S. It's a good idea when you build your fortress to fill the moat with piranhas!)

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Ifyou keep an open mind and listen to your teenage son’s YouTube idols when he begs you to (non-stop until you can‘t take it any longer), you might actually find them (some of them) funny (somewhat) and he won‘t mind (as much) spending those 2 minutes or so with you!

If you can continue to be receptive even AFTER hearing Ray William Johnson’s theme song (Ray do you kiss your grandma with that mouth? I kid ya‘), then you will definitely find him amusing/entertaining/odd…. After all, who can blame him? We Moms these days are pretty hot stuff and that cat is hysterical! ;)

rushes right to the table and starts doing their homework without being asked, while at the same time helping you put away the groceries and complimenting your outfit, then creatively works in that awful grade they got in English, but immediately reassures you that, while it was a bad grade, it was the best grade in the class they are probably fibbing!

because MY kids got the best grade in the class! They told me so themselves!

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If you lend your teenage daughter your favorite shirt because she has a special party to go to and she promises to return it in the same condition first thing the next morning, all the while grinning from ear-to-ear because you have made her SO happy…… FORGET ABOUT IT (pronounced: fuggedaboutit)! - it’s like giving a Moose a Muffin!