BLAH

AAA (aired 4/18/00)

As we open the show, Oscar
Sevilla

gives a quick interview, followed by one by a very
amused El Apache. I presume those two will be locking up
later in the show. Jesus Zuniga is standing in front of a
giant LLL logo. His partner, Leobardo Magadan (this guy is
EVERYWHERE) is standing in front of a giant AAA logo. So, apparently,
tonight will continue the AAA vs. LLL war.

When we come back from commercial, Jesus Zuniga is standing on a
footbridge which crosses a river. He is joined by three ladies: the
lovely Tifany, the quasi-lovely Miss Janeth,
and the butt-ugly Rosy Moreno. Moreno's buzzcut hairdo
doesn't help her cause any, either. I guess she must have been on the
losing end of a hair vs. hair match recently. All three ladies give
their two pesos worth, so I guess they'll be involved in the next
match.

Sure enough, the next match is a ladies Six-Man...er, Six-Person
match.

The team representing AAA comes out first. Their captian is
Xochitl Hamada. Geez, is that a Triple Word Score name or
what??? She's followed by her teammates Estrellita and
Sahori. Hamada is a little on the chunky side, but I'm not
gonna be the one to tell her. She's one tough broad. Estrellita is
wearing an outfit that more closely resembles lingerie than wrestling
attire and, of course, I APPROVE! Sahori is the petite member of the
team and is clad in Joshi Purureso-style attire. Oh, by the way, the
AAA team is accompanied by a MIDGET IN A POLAR BEAR SUIT!!!! What the
hell is the deal with white, furry midgets this week?????

Now the LLL team of Miss Janeth, Rosy Moreno, and Tifany make their way
down the aisle, all wearing matching blue and white outfits. The
Captains (Janeth and Hamada) are introduced and we're underway.

Miss Janeth, Rosy Moreno, Tifany

vs.

Xochitl Hamada, Estrellita, Sahory

This is a rare one-fall lucha match. To start out, the LLL team
jump on their opponents one at a time. Lots of triple teaming to start
things off by the LLL team. First, they jump on Sahori. Three kicks to
the midsection, followed by two hair-mare takedowns, finalized by a
hairwhip whirlybird spin courtesy of Miss Janeth. Followed by a double
slingshot belly to back suplex on Sahori by Miss Janeth and Rosy
Moreno. Now all three LLL ladies are attacking Estrellita. Estrellita
whipped into the ropes. Double drop toe hold, followed up by a double
elbowdrop from Moreno and Tifany. Nicely done. Moreno, Tifany, and
Janeth all quickly run off opposite ropes and converge with a triple
dropkick, squashing the skull of the kneeling Estrellita. Beautiful!!!
Geez, it's a refreshing change to see a women's match that features
actual wrestlers. All the so-called female wrestlers in the States
should be forced to watch these girls in action, to see what REAL
women's wrestling is all about. These ladies know how to be sexy and
brutal all at the same time. Well, okay, I wouldn't really say Xochitl
Hamada or Rosy Moreno were sexy, but they're EXTRA BRUTAL, so I guess
that makes up for it. Estrellita is forced to bail out. Now Hamada is
in and is the victim of what I can only describe as a Triple Team
H-Bomb by the LLL ladies. Whip into the corner, and each LLL lady takes
turns landing a running clothesline on Hamada. Now a double bulldog out
of the corner by Moreno and Tifany. Now, the LLL ladies mount Hamada
for a victory pose. Tilt a whirl backbreaker on Miss Janeth as the AAA
girls charge back into the ring. Sahori and Hamada with a double
hiptoss on Tifany, who rolls out of the ring. As the LLL ladies regroup
outside the ring, the refs attempt to restore a little order (yeah,
RIGHT!). Rosy Moreno misses a dropkick on Hamada. Hamada misses a
clothesline, which is ducked under by Moreno. Moreno with an armdrag.
Horribly botched hiptoss by Hamada. Hamada lands a tilt a whirl
backbreaker on Moreno, who rolls to the outside. One thing you'll
notice in AAA that's a little different from CMLL is the fact that they
DO have fan barriers. Inside the ring, Estrellita squares off with Miss
Janeth. Janeth with a dropkick. Whips Estrellita into the corner and
meets her coming out with a running clothesline. Estrillita ducks a
double clothesline by Janeth and Tifany, but Sahori isn't so lucky. She
gets nailed. But as they turn around, both Janeth and Tifany are double
clotheslined by Estrellita. Hamada going up to the top rope. Double
Cross Body Block on Tifany and Janeth. All Six women going at it in the
ring. Hamada lands a power bomb on Janeth. Sahori rolls up Tifany.
Estrellita with a la majistral rollup on Moreno. Two counts all around
as the LLL ladies manage to kick out and leave the ring. Moreno
reenters the ring and exchanges hard chops with Hamada. Moreno floors
Hamada with a headbutt. Hamada off the ropes with a dropkick that sends
Moreno out of the ring. Hamada climbs the turnbuckle and comes down
with a double axehandle onto the floor. Inside the ring, Tifany and
Janeth whip Estrellita and Sahory towards each other. Do-si-do, and
Tifany and Janeth eat a double clothesline. This action is fast and
furious. I love it. I don't even have time to make any smartass
comments!!!! Sahori and Estrellita mounting opposite turnbuckles, go
for dropkicks, but both miss. Moreno crawls back into the ring and
whips Sahori into the ropes and hoists her onto her shoulders. The LLL
ladies going for a Doomsday Device-type move as Moreno has Sahori on
her shoulders and Janeth came off the top with a bombs away. All three
LLL girls pin Sahori. Having pinned one non-captain, they turn their
attention to Estrellita. Whip into the ropes. Double clothesline by
Moreno and Janeth. All three LLL ladies hoist Janeth high into the air
and drive her face first into the mat. Now, Moreno and Janeth each grab
one of Estrellita's arms while Tifany STANDS on her. This is just too
much for Estrellita, and she's forced to submit. (Time of the
match 5:55) After the match, Hamada verbally chastises her
partners for losing. Her verbal attacks quickly turn physical. Don't
think we'll be seeing those three team again any time soon. Damn! What
a great way to start the show! Hopefully, this is a sign of good things
to come.

There appears to be a HUGE crowd on hand. Judging by the logo on the
fan barrier, I'm assuming these matches were taped at the "Rey de
Reyes" (King of Kings) tournament card. WCW would LOVE to draw crowds
this size.

When we return from commercial, El Apache comes out with a group of
Rodeo Clowns???? He's also accompanied by a VERY HOT young lady in a
bikini (a minor detail, but an important one nonetheless). The rodeo
clowns are throwing out balls and frisbees to the fans. Uh, I thought
Apache was supposed to be the HEEL. How many heels do you know that
come to the ring accompanied by clowns? And the hot chick won't get him
any boos, either!

Now, Oscar Sevilla makes his way down the aisle. He too is accompanied
by a lovely young lady (in a matador costume) and a bunch of clowns.
What's with all the freakin' CLOWNS??? Sevilla's ring costume is very
reminiscent of Tito Santana's during his "El Matador" days.
Unfortunately, the similarities end there. Sevilla can't carry
Santana's jockstrap.

Uh-oh, you just KNEW it was bound to happen. It was only a matter of
time before things got ugly and the clowns started going at it.
Apache's clowns and Sevilla's clowns are ALL OVER one another. The
crowd is eating this up. It's too bad FOX doesn't have any camera crews
here. This could be their next special, "When Mexican Clowns Attack!",
or maybe "When Good Clowns Go Bad!". The clowns continue to pelt one
another with the souvenir balls and physically attack each other. This
is truly Bizarre! Now, the clowns are going at it with AAA security.
The security guys are getting their asses handed to them by a bunch of
clowns!!! Ha!!! El Apache and Oscar Sevilla are just standing in their
respective corners. All the action up to this point has revolved around
the clowns. Finally, the clowns are cleared from the ring. Looks like
we might have an actual WRESTLING match.

El Apache

vs.

Oscar Sevilla

During ring introductions, the huge crowd is amusing itself by
tossing the balls and frisbees from one side of the stadium to another.
Finally, the match is underway. Sevilla charges in with a dropkick, but
is caught by El Apache. El Apache sets him up into Razor's Edge
position and LAUNCHES Sevilla two-thirds of the way across the ring.
Apache picks him up and NAILS him with a Michinoku Driver and gets the
quick three count. (Time of the Fall :29) Geez, less than
thirty seconds and Apache is up one fall to none.

Between falls, the rudos ref goes over to give El Apache a quick
shoulder massage. I'm not sure what that's all about, and I don't think
I want to know. This particular referee is notoriously biased towards
the rudos.

Damn amusing Colgate commercial where a guy brushes his teeth before
bed and then is shown sleeping with a goofy grin on his face. His wife
is sitting beside him in the bed looking rather...um, how should I say
this...unfulfilled.

As the second fall begins, Apache runs over and kicks Sevilla's thigh.
Apache picks him up into Razor's Edge position and AGAIN throws Sevilla
across the ring. Apache picks him up and tries to set him up for
another Michinoku Driver, but Sevilla rolls through it and cradles
Apache. Sevilla gets the three count. (Time of the fall
:26) Are you kiddin' me??? These guys aren't wasting any time,
eh?

As the third fall begins, both men are in the middle of the ring.
Apache with a series of stiff right hands that drive Sevilla against
the ropes. Apache gives the "thumbs up" to the fans and they boo
accordingly. Apache whips Sevilla into the ropes, ducks a clothesline,
and nails Sevilla with a clothesline of his own. Sevilla goes tumbling
out of the ring. Apache runs into the ropes and flies outside the ring
with a slingshot Plancha, flooring Sevilla. Apache with a suicide dive
landing squarely into the chest of Sevilla. I've just noticed that
Sevilla is busted open. I'm not sure it that's the result of the stiff
punches he took, or if he bladed while we weren't looking. Sevilla
drives Apache into the ringpost and now Apache is busted WIDE OPEN on
the side of his head. That was NO blade job. Apache is juicing the hard
way. The blood is gushing from Apache's temple. Sevilla pursues Apache
outside the ring with a series of chops. Sevilla, who is bleeding
pretty good himself, is showing more toughness than I've ever seen from
him. Sevilla catches Apache with a running clothesline. Both men back
into the ring. Sevilla locks on a bow and arrow submission, but Apache
fights his way out. Both men are bloody messes. Sevilla's white sleeves
are quickly turning red. La Majistral cradle by Sevilla, but the
referee gives a SLOW count. Apache kicks out before the ref gets to
three, but that looked like about an eight count. The fans are really
on the ref's case. Sevilla and Apache both struggling to make it back
to their feet. Hard right by Apache. Apache whips Sevilla into the
ropes and scoops him up into a torture rack backbreaker, but Sevilla
rolls with it and turns it into a crucifix pin. Again, the ref counts
VERY slowly and only gets to two. Sevilla, along with the fans, voices
his displeasure at the officiating. Both men are very weary from loss
of blood. Sevilla's bleeding has subsided, but Apache is still gushing.
Head scissors into a rollup by Sevilla. Again with the slow count. Two
count only. At this point, Apache is in no condition to continue and is
only being saved by the crooked ref. The fans are NOT happy about it.
Again, this is the most toughness I've ever seen Sevilla display. Both
men really selling the fatigue as they exchange punches from their
knees. Sevilla drags Apache to the middle of the ring. Sevilla is
trying to set him up for a surfboard, but Apache fights out of it with
a back elbow. Now, Apache is on the attack. He lands a dropkick to the
face of the kneeling Sevilla. El Apache hoists Sevilla up onto the top
turnbuckle. Apache climbs up and nails a superplex from the second
turnbuckle. El Apache crawls over for the cover and the ref counts
incredibly fast, but only makes it to two before Sevilla kicks out. The
crowd is livid. The ref appears quite proud of himself as he smirks
towards the ringside fans. The biased referees are another element that
makes AAA a bit different from CMLL. Having tecnico and rudo refs makes
for great plot devices. Apache once again places Sevilla up onto the
turnbuckles. Apache climbs up to try for another superplex. Sevilla
flips over Apache and turns it into a Super Sunset Flip. ANOTHER slow
count only gets to two. I can't see this slow count schtick lasting too
much longer. A couple more of those and the fans are gonna kill the ref
is Sevilla doesn't. I must admit that I'm genuinely impressed by
Sevilla. This is the best match I've seen him work. Of course, being in
with an old pro like El Apache doesn't hurt. More shots of the crowd.
OKAY already, we get the point! You drew TONS of people.
Congratulations. Back to the match. Both men slumping in total
exhaustion in the middle of the ring. Sevilla just kind of pushes
Apache over and goes for the cover. Straight count from the ref this
time, so I guess he decided to pull the plug on that mini-angle. Two
count only. The white sleeves on Sevilla's shirt are now COMPLETELY red
from his blood, as well as the blood of El Apache. Sevilla's usual
"Pretty Boy" look is long gone. Both men look as though they've been
through a war. And both men are selling the fatigue consistently as the
match goes on. That's a skill most American wrestlers haven't mastered
yet. El Apache rises to his feet and pounds Sevilla with a stiff right
hand. Sevilla whips El Apache into the ropes, but we COMPLETELY MISS
what happens because they're showing a slo-mo replay of earlier action.
I have no clue why. Apparently, the WCW production crew took over for a
few seconds. And whatever it was that we missed must have been fairly
significant, because when we cut back to the match, Sevilla has El
Apache locked in a crucifix-style submission hold. Sevilla is not only
applying pressure by pulling back on both of Apache's arms, but he's
grinding his knee into the back of Apache's neck. After a few seconds
of this, Apache is forced to give it up. The referee, having apparently
abandoned his pro-Apache schtick, calls for the bell immediately and
Sevilla is declared the winner. (Time of the fall 7:20)
WOW, what a match! Without a doubt, that's the best I've ever seen
Sevilla look in the ring. Hang on a sec, there's another guy coming
into the ring. He's got scissors and electric clippers. HOLY CRAP! This
must have been a HAIR vs. HAIR match!!!! That would have
been a nice little detail to share with the audience BEFORE the match
started. El Apache is a bloody mess. The barber tries to cut off El
Apache's ponytail with the scissors, but Apache stops him and points to
Sevilla. Apache is actually letting Sevilla cut off the ponytail!!!
What a class act! Sevilla cuts off the ponytail and shows his new
"trophy" to the crowd. Apache then kneels and allows the barber to
shave him bald with the electric clippers. The barber isn't exactly
being gentle either. Apache's head is covered with lacerations, but the
barber is plowing the clippers through Apache's head. In a matter of
seconds, Apache is totally bald. This is BIG-TIME humiliation for
Apache, but he's taking it like a pro. Even among the rudos luchadores,
HONOR is very important. Gee, that's another concept that's foreign to
most American workers. Meanwhile, Sevilla slumps in the corner where
the ref raises his hand in victory. After the shaving is completed,
Apache walks over to Sevilla and SHAKES HIS HAND and raises his hand in
victory! What an honorable showing of respect and professionalism by El
Apache! The huge crowd acknowledges both men with their applause. The
crowd gives El Apache a huge ovation as he limps back to his dressing
room. El Apache has lost his hair, but not his HONOR.

When we return from commercials, we're in the studio with Jesus Zuniga.
It's time for NOTI AAA, which is basically just a little update on some
recent happenings within the promotion. If my Spanish was better, I'd
translate all of this. But, since it ain't, we'll skip it.

When we retun, we're inside a gym. Cibernetico is lifting
weights. He's being interviewed by Jesus Zuniga. I assume he's going to
be in the next match.

As the next match begins, Tiger Steel emerges from the
dressing room. Steel is a big American wrestler who was trained by
Shawn Michaels. He bears more than a passing resemblance to Kevin Nash.
The resemblence is strong enough that I'm sure it's intentional.
Unfortunately, he also resembles Nash inside the ring (READ: SLOW, POOR
WORKRATE, LIMITED REPERTOIRE). Unlike the previous wrestlers, who had
thrown out frisbees to the fans, Steel is throwing out TORTILLAS! Now,
THERE'S a good way to get heel heat. I've gotta give him an A for
creativity, at least. Steel is wearing a long leather sleeveless
coat/robe. It's darn strange looking. It looks like something Masa
Chono refused to wear. Steel enters the ring as the fans pelt him with
the tortillas he had thrown out earlier. The fans do NOT like this
guy.

His opponent is Cibernetico. Normally, Cibernetico wrestles as a rudo.
Both Cibernetico and Steel are part of the LLL faction. But tonight,
Cibernetico is DEFINITELY the fan favorite. Methinks the big gringo has
pissed the fans off pretty good.

Tiger Steel

vs.

Cibernetico

BULL TERRY MATCH!

I don't know what the heck a Bull Terry Match is, but the
graphic was kind enough to let us know that this is one. Okay,
apparently a Bull Terry match is a Dog Collar Match. Both men are
taking their own sweet time putting the dog collars around their necks.
Of course, Tiger Steel takes his time doing EVERYTHING! Man, that's one
LONG-ASS chain between the dog collars. It looks like one guy could be
in the ring and the other guy could be out in the crowd.

Cibernetico charges at Steel as the match gets underway. But Steel
overpowers him. Steel with a forearm smash to the back. Now, Steel has
wrapped the chain around his fist and his pounding away on Cibernetico.
Of course, he's doing all of this at his own methodical pace. Now Steel
wraps the chain around Cibernetico's throat and is choking him with it.
Actually, this type of match is right up Steel's alley. A methodical
pace is somewhat acceptable and his lack of wrestling skill is
basically irrelevant. Steel drags Cibernetico over to the corner and
touches one turnbuckle. Ah, this is being contested under REAL dog
collar match rules, another thing that has been abandoned by the
American feds. Steel easily makes it to the second corner. But
Cibernetico fires several shots to the midsection and breaks Steel's
momentum. So, I guess he has to start over now. After several gut
shots, Steel slumps down in the corner. Cibernetico touches two corners
easily before Steel FLOORS him with a running clothesline. This guy's
so much like Nash, it's almost scary. If Vince McMahon ever wants to
revive the Fake Diesel character, I know who he should call. Whoa!
Wormhole!!!! We must have had a quick-cut edit, because both men are
outside the ring now. Steel hoists Cibernetico up and drops him throat
first across the fan barrier. Steel once again wraps the chain around
his fist and hammers Cibernetico with a roundhouse right that sends the
masked man flying over the fan barrier LITERALLY into the laps on the
front row ringsiders. Trying to be helpful, several young men pick up
Cibernetico and start to roll him back over the fan barrier. This seems
to amuse Tiger Steel because he quickly runs back over and pushes
Cibernetico back into the fans arms. Well, I'll say one thing for
Steel, he knows how to make people HATE him! And that, my friends, is a
damn marketable skill. Just ask Mark Madden! Finally Steel throws
Cibernetico back into the ring. Steel resumes his methodical pace and
continues to choke Cibernetico with the chain. Steel tears away a large
chunk of Cibernetico mask just 'cause he can, I guess. Now Steel plants
his knee into Cibernetico's back and wrenches his head back by his
mask. Now Steel climbs to his feet and applies...A CLAW HOLD?!?!? Yes,
True Believers, the Claw Hold is alive and well in the Year 2000.
Cibernetico selling it like the ghosts of every dead Von Erich are
squashing his skull all at once. Steel uses the claw to lead
Cibernetico around the ring. Steel touches one corner. Two corners.
Three corners. Cibernetico lands a hard gutshot just before Steel makes
it to the fourth corner. But Steel is just too big for Cibernetico to
sustain any offense (especially in a gimmick match like this). Now
Steel is going for the tried and true Hangman move. He wraps the chain
around Cibernetico's throat and tosses the luchadore over the ropes.
Unfortunately for Steel, he left too much slack in the chain. Both of
Cibernetico's feet hit square on the floor, rendering the move TOTALLY
ineffective! Ha!!!!! Cibernetico starts to sell it anyway, but Steel
quickly pulls him back into the ring. Cibernetico takes Steel's head to
the turnbuckle three times. Steel tries to escape, but Cibernetico
reels him in with the chain. Cibernetico snap mares the big man BY THE
CHAIN. Kind of a cool visual, actually. Cibernetico ducks a clothesline
from Steel and catches him coming off the ropes in a powerslam. The
tide looks like it may be turning. Cibernetico with the old "Chain
between the legs of the heel" schtick. Oh brother, they're pulling out
all the old standards. Cibernetico touches three corners and is about
to touch the fourth, but Sangre Chicana runs to the ring
and splashes a cup of liquid in Cibernetico's face. Don't know what it
was (coffee, tequila, Corona, who knows). Cibernetico is selling it as
if it were Sulfuric Acid. This gives Steel ample time to lug his ass
off the mat the stroll to all four corners. (Time of the match
7:10) Cibernetico, not seeming to care that he lost, quickly
unbuckles the collar and runs up the ramp to go after Sangre Chicana.
Cibernetico is met by his stable, Los Vipers. The AAA
security guys step in before a fight breaks out. So wait a minute, the
AAA security guys have no trouble controlling five wrestlers, but they
got their asses kicked earlier in the night by a bunch of
CLOWNS?!?!?!?! Inside the ring, Tiger Steel celebrates his victory by
holding the chain high above his head. The fans give him a
well-deserved round of boos.

Now, they're running a commercial for a Galavision show called Al Ritmo
de la Noche. Don't know what this show's about, but apparently it's
going to feature a bunch of hot chicks in bikinis and cat makeup. So, I
guess I'll be watching. MEOW!!!!

As we return, we appear to be in a Mexican cemetary. La Parka Jr.
is skulking about. But he doesn't exactly look imposing in his
white shorts and red T Shirt. Actually, he looks pretty damn goofy.
Like his WCW counterpart, Parka Jr. is a very skilled luchadore who,
sadly, is mostly used as comic relief.

Now, we come back to the ring for the MAIN EVENT. Unfortunately, AAA
main events are notorious for not being as good as the undercard. Quite
frankly, there's no way this will overshadow the Apache-Sevilla match.
That one was a classic. Oh goodie, it's an 8-Man tag match. Those
always have clusterfrick written all over them.

Octagon, Mascara Sagrada, La Parka Jr. , Alebrije w/Cuije

vs.

Sangre Chicana, El hijo del Espectro, Pirata Morgan, El Texano

Geez, what a motley crew! With Parka and Alebrije involved, this
one is sure to have plenty of goofiness. Kind of a shame to waste
Octagon in this type of match. But I feel even worse for the rudos
team, because they'll surely have to sell for the silliness.

The match begins with the expected clusterfrick as all eight men go at
it. The camera focuses on Octagon and Sangre Chicana battling in the
corner. Damn! I hate 8-Man matches. Even with good camerawork, it's
next to impossible to tell what's going on. And lucha libre's No Tags
Necessary rule makes it even tougher. Now, the rudos are QUADRUPLE
TEAMING Mascara Sagrada. Inexplicably, the tecnicos allow this to
happen. The rudos take turns dropping elbows and knees on Sagrada.
Geez, did Sagrada's teammates make a run for the border, or what???
Sagrada is eventually spared when Cuije runs into the ring to get the
attention of the rudos. They sent the MIDGET to save him???? Now
Espectro is chasing Cuije around the ring. Let the wackiness ensue! Of
course, Espectro doesn't catch Cuije. He eats a clothesline from
Alebrije. Now, El Texano comes over and he and Espectro doubleteam
Alebrije. They toss him over the fan barrier into the front row. Of
course, while this is going on, I'm sure we're missing tons of action
elesewhere. That's why I hate 8-Man Tags. El Texano takes a chair from
one of the ringsiders and takes it into the ring. He CLOCKS Octagon
with the chair. The tecnico ref immediately calls for a DQ. (Time
of the fall 2:50) Texano continues to wipe out the tecnicos with
the chair until La Parka Jr. brings in a chair of his own to even
things up. So, is La Parka Jr. the CHAIRMAN of AAA????

Hey, it's that 1-800-226-2727 Collect en Espanol commercial. I've said
it before and I'll say it again, this chick could get me to call any
number she wanted. Ay-ya-yi!!!!

The second fall begins with the tecnicos team at a definite
disadvantage, since they'd just taken a beating from Texano with the
chair. Los tecnicos try to get back into the ring one at a time, but
the rudos won't let them. Each time they try, two or three of the
baddies put the boots to 'em. Hey Geniuses, try going in all at once!
Once again little Cuije gets the rudos' attention. Espectro chases him
outside the ring and CATCHES him! Gorilla Press! OH!!!!! Espectro just
slammed Cuije into the ringpost. The little guy is DOWN! And the
commentary team is LAUGHING?!?!?!?! Geez, they're a cruel bunch south
of the border. Inside the ring, El Texano lands a beautiful flying
Tiger Bomb off the turnbuckles on La Parka Jr. And the announcers are
STILL laughing about the fate which befell Cuije. Now it's Octagon's
turn to get quadruple teamed. He eats a missle dropkick from El Texano.
Silver King's old "Boxcar Boys" tag team partner is making a great
showing for himself. Now, all 8 guys in again. La Parka Jr. brings a
chair into the ring and pounds away on los rudos. The referee has
decided that this is perfectly okay. Then why the hell did he DQ Texano
in the first fall??? I guess he's the tecnico ref, so that's to be
expected. The bad guys all bail out. Meanwhile out on the entry ramp,
Mascara Sagrada is WHIPPING Espectro with a large piece of rope. Inside
the ring, Alebrije is squaring off with Pirata Morgan. Cuije runs into
the ring and does pushups, just to show that he's okay I guess. Uh-oh,
the stupidity is about to begin. Alebrije is actually ENCOURAGING Cuije
to confront Pirata Morgan. Cuije is covering one eye to make fun of
Morgan's eyepatch. Morgan playing along like a pro. Morgan turns his
back on Cuije, so that the midget can pinch his butt. I hate this crap.
OH YESSSSSS!!! Morgan just grabbed Cuije and clubbed him upside the
head!!! And for some reason, Alibrije isn't doing anything about it. I
hate to be a midget basher, but that was SWEET! Now Morgan chases after
Cuije, but is met by a clothesline from Alibreje. But the damage had
been done. Little Cuije is earning his pay tonight, that's for damn
sure. More silliness involving Cuije, including a midget tug of war
where Alebrije has Cuije's legs and Morgan has his arms. Enough
already! Several more minutes of comedy schtick involving Cuije. I'm
not gonna bother to call it. Back to real action, Sagrada nails Texano
with a missle dropkick, which sends Texano to the outside. Sagrada is
doing somersaults and backflips in the ring just 'cause he can, I
guess. Tag to Parka Jr. The crowd goes absolutely NUTS!!! They love
this guy. La Parka spends the next couple minutes doing his Curly of
the Three Stooges routine. He follows that up by dancing like Michael
Jackson. Ugh!!!! I'm all for humor in wrestling, but this match is
getting to me. But, the kids in the crowd are eating it up. Unlike the
American feds, Mexican promoters make no bones about targeting their
products to children. I'm not doing a complete blow-by-blow at this
point because, quite frankly, things have just gotten too silly. Too
much dancing and WAY too much butt pinching. The show had been
top-notch up until this match. It's a shame to end it on such a
ridiculous note. Again, I question the logic of putting Octagon in a
comedy match like this. And why the hell wasn't the Apache-Sevilla
match the Main Event???? Basically, they're just wasting time until
they get the signal to go for the finish. Oh goodie, now Cuije is back
in the ring. More midget silliness. Cuije tries for a suicide dive
through the ropes at Pirata Morgan, but Morgan catches him and tosses
him over his shoulder into about the fifth row of fans. Sadly, the
camera didn't follow the little guy. I'm annoyed enough with him that I
would have enjoyed seeing the landing. Morgan gets nailed by Alebrije
with a flying spear for his trouble. Geez, why does Cuije come out with
this guy? Apparently, his job is to get destroyed so that Alebrije can
hit his opponent when he's not looking. Pitiful. Just when it looks
like we're going to get down to some actual wrestling, it's time take
it home. Sangre Chicana catches Octagon in an octopus hold. Cibernetico
runs down to rinside and hurls a cup of liquid in the general direction
of Sangre Chicana. Octagon rolls the octopus hold into a crucifix pin
and gets the three count. (Time of the fall 11:50) What a
shame that the longest segment of the show was wasted on a comedy
match. The rudos team isn't pleased by this and races up the ramp to
confront Cibernetico and the rest of Los Vipers. Hey look, it's
Psychosis(Part Deaux). Too bad he wasn't on the show. I'm
a big fan of the AAA version. Mostly because HE didn't sell out and
surrender his mask to a bunch of idiotic American promoters who have no
concept what the mask is all about. Sangre Chicana's team and los
Vipers exchange harsh words for awhile on the entrance ramp. Now, the
rudos team returns to the ring for a little victory celebration, even
though they LOST.

Now, we're back to the commentary table. Jesus and Leobardo wrap up the
show and hype next weeks episode. Gee, I wonder if somebody set up an
ENGLISH announce team table at these shows, if it would always be
getting destroyed? Just a little something to think about.

Excluding the main event(which I've personally blocked from my memory,
and I suggest you do the same), this was a damn good show. The hair vs.
hair encounter between El Apache and Oscar Sevilla was one I'll
remember for a long time. The women's match was a great opener and even
Tiger Steel wasn't too bad in the dog collar match. AAA definitely wins
the competition this week for best lucha libre show. But maybe next
week, it will be CMLL that blows me away. That's the great thing about
the lucha shows, their unpredictability.

Well, 'til next time, this is the Dumb Gringo WV RiffRaff sayin' GOOD
DAY!