Everything you always wanted to know about swingers.

I'm an armymom.. That young man of mine is my pride and joy. He's done one tour in Iraq and just recently got back from Korea. It was the hardest thing for me to accept despite know he wanted to be military since a he was little. For him, it WAS the right thing to do. We live in the country, no jobs close by. We live modestly so couldn't afford to put him through college. So in that direction it was good for him, but it also gave him discipline. Grew him up good. The hardest thing was when he went to Iraq. When they say the soldier isn't the only one fighting these wars, it's true. I suffered panic attacks when he was over there. Depression. And that's about the time I took hiatus from the lifestyle. I found that VERY few people understood what I was going through. I just couldn't deal with people telling me, " Oh I know how you feel, my son is in college and only gets to come home once a month"... Oh, that was it. This was told to me at a party. I told my husband, let's go.. and I told him I wouldn't play till he's stateside..

Simonton TX

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good post.

San Antonio TX

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Great satisfaction can be realized when we accept we are helping him transition from a boy to a man. Many males, me included, weren't quite ready to go from high school straight to college. So I joined the Navy and those six years did a lot to teach me better dicipline, respect, and patience. From that I was able to decide what I really wanted to do and then went to college to do it. And the military helped pay for it.

It also needs to be looked at in two parts. One part is that it is the military. Another part is that where one ends up depends upon the job he takes. For example, we have a nephew who is a Marine. However, he is an air traffic controller in Japan.

If he studies hard and does well on the entrance exam, he can choose among many different occupations- many with awesome training. It's amazing how a few years of real-world experience with hard working men can turn a young man into a real man and get him on a good path in life.

And he'll always be able to say, "I served my country." Nobody can take that away from him and he'll have millions of brothers in arms and patriotic citizens who will look up to him for that.

Bensalem PA

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My younger son toyed with the idea of joining the Air Force for a few years. I think it's a good career move for those who really want to do it. I can't imagine losing a son in a way, BUT, I also can't imagine losing a son in a car wreck, in a fight, to a drug overdose, at the hands of someone random, of cancer or another tragic disease, you get the idea.

if my son were to die serving his country, I don't know how I would handle it, BUT I would handle it like so many others have before me. I would grieve all my life and live with a broken heart, but I would also be very proud of him for dying doing something he truly believed in. Both my sons' choices for their lives aren't about me; they're about what they believe is best for themselves. Helps that they are already grown men, it's easier for me to say that. No one knows when or how they are going to die. I imagine it's the most awful thing a parent ever faces. This same son was in a car wreck last year and it had me shook up for a long time, does even still.

Luckily, I don't have to face that. I think he would have done very well in the Air Force though. He's such a capable, adaptable, intelligent and wonderful young man and I'm proud of him no matter what. He's still figuring it out for himself.

San Antonio TX

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I feel y'alls pain. Both Jay and I are veterans. But there is a complete difference in our serving and our child going to war. Yeah yeah, I'm a fucking hypocrite. I know. But its true. She was talking about enlisting, I said the Air Force. But we are going with you to the recruiter, because if you do not get it in writing before your 2nd oath..you are government property. I am hoping time away has changed her mind.

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Thank you! I'm happy to hear opportunities are opening for your son. He brought us to the dinner table, had typed up 'voter' paper, written a speech, and pulled out two Marine Corps flags for each of us, saying, "Wouldn't you two feel proud to fly these over your homes". To wit, I replied, "Wouldn't you feel proud to walk to 5 miles to work each day?" He was ready for me... "Mom, I was to be the best. I want to serve." / "Good, make me dinner."

"Mom, I want to walk in the shoes of all those before me." / "Great! Give me their names" (Damnit, he does..) But I'm on a Mother's roll with him...sooo "Where are they now?" "Uhh, Mom, well...dead."

"Age range each died, Dear?" "Well, between 23 & 29."

I'm a Dego...I'll win out over his little Welsh driven butt!

Monaca PA

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This is occurring RIGHT NOW with us! Not only is it important to defer to those who have already served, it is EXTREMELY important to understand both the recruitment process (no disrespect to recruiters), and what three things HE, as an intelligent, responsible, young man needs to understand. I was so very opposed to my son's desire to enter the Marines. The reasons are surely yours: my baby! However, we do have Marines in our family and also, Veterans in other branches. Our son wanted Infantry! OH MY G*D! That is the worst. But the recruiters see a body. That's their job. So, I decided to get everyone together in the same room for a sit down. We all questioned the exact layout. Ask for guarantees in placement...IN WRITING. Also, ask the exact combat experience of the recruiter. Most never see it! Do not allow him to sign up without his placement scores from the tests they will give him..They WILL provide them.( I gave my son practice exams...they have them at Barnes and Noble. It indicates job placement they would give him. ) With that said...recruiters secretly kept calling him...and he is 17! They said only 1 person could be recruited this month.. Caught that one in a bold face lie, even with the cutbacks. Infantry is the worst...it WILL CHANGE HIM. Ask to go to the bases for tours. They will do this. Take someone you trust with longtime experience with you. Go with him to visit the other branches. Here's the 3 questions: 1. What benefits are guaranteed IN WRITING (schooling, housing, stipend....) 2. What income benefit is there for the future (this is the type of job in our market that is predicited to be open once he is finished) 3. Why does he want to enter this arena Intel and Comm are among the 2 highest income benefit for the future. The difference between them and infantry are.....$100,000.oo first year out and $37,000.oo. Army and Marines are NOT the place to be. Again...no disrespect..we have military family. 'Sorry so long....but this matters to me. My son tested for Intel and Comm in Navy...the other recruiters almost sabotaged his future. Again no disrespect. I even stand for our National Anthem....at home.

Monaca PA

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That's what this young single funny intelligent guy things too. BUT HE LOOKS LIKE MY SON. So, I declined meeting, and he emailed again, so I told him why. Then later, he comes back with "that might be kind of fun..."

So, while I don't mind being with guys my sons' ages (30 and 26), and once I was with a guy with the same first name as one of them, it feels kind of weird looks-wise.

So, I'll skip, but I have to say I am attracted to guys with that coloring, and dark eyes, but that doesnt mean they LOOK like them. This one's too close for comfort.

A side note: I am adopted. And it's VERY common for adoptees to be attracted to birth family members if they get the chance to meet/reunite. There's a connection that gets mistaken for attraction. When I found some birth family, my half sister said to her brother (the 3 of us have different fathers, but i was the only one given up for adoption) after he said, "I might have met her and didn't even know it," said, "Well, that would be okay. GOod thing you didn't DATE her and not know it!"

San Antonio TX

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I dont have any sons but now I'm wondering if I dont find blonde guys as appealling because they remind me of my brother...hmmm

I do know that I wont be with young guys because they remind me of my college students. When I explain that, they think the notion is hot! LOL.. typical. But I do not. If I feel like I could show up to teach a freshman level course and he may be sitting in the room there is no way I'll be sitting on his face.

Pittsburgh PA

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no sons here, but I will admit no attraction to guys that look like my step-son. But I wouldn't have been attracted to him before he was my step-son either.