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Cheers and Jeers

If you’ve sat near Section 303 (the Pep Band) or 304 (30ish alumni, including the TALAH Boys), you know that we’ve got some old standards that we use to cheer our team and jeer the other guys. These have been codified in what the Pep Band likes to call The Book of the Faithful; we’ve made some modifications to it for our use here. A tip of the hat goes to our neighbors.

Rules of Thumb:

If you think you are too loud, yell louder. If you don’t need cough drops by the end of the game, you didn’t yell loud enough.

Respect the Chargers, never boo them…. boo the other team’s good performance.

Coach is your coach too. If he says jump, ask how high, then double it.

Pre-Game (We’re just getting warmed up…)

The officials will be announced. As each is announced, say: First Ref: BlindSecond Ref: DeafThird Ref: DumbFourth Ref: Lame

We have our own counter-singing to “Sweet Home Alabama”. Is it the entire song? Nope, but we never get that far.Big wheels keep on turning … on my 4×4Carry me home to see my kin … like my brothersSinging songs about the Southland… like “Sweet Home Alabama”I miss Alabama once again and I think its a sin, yes … like incestWell I heard Mr. Young sing about her … off keyWell, I heard ol’ Neil put her down … because she was heavyWell, I hope Neil Young will remember … puff, puff, passA Southern man don’t need him around anyhow … because we’re real men (and women)

Sweet home Alabama, where the skies are so blue … Charger Blue!Sweet Home Alabama Lord, I’m coming home to you

For opposing player introductions: all turn around and face the wall and chant “Sieve sieve sieve …” after the goalie is announced until the next player’s name is announced (presuming they start with the goalie as they have the last few years); everyone else gets a “Sucks!“

For UAH introductions: any player who is from Ontario is greeted with an “ONNNN-tario!“; any player from anywhere else gets a “NOT Ontario!“. This goes back to our Division II days, when many of our players were from that fine province. Of late, we’ve had a number of Western Canadian guys, a lot of Americans, and a smattering of Europeans (Latvians, Finns, and lately a Brit). Good luck getting it changed to anything else. I think that an “A-MER-ica!” chant would be appropriate, but I’m just the one guy. Hell, our first game this year had three American forwards, an Albertan and a Finn at defense, and an American goaltender.A more recent version of the BotF states “CANADA!” and “NOT CANADA!”, but that’s not being observed.

Fight Song:
True Story: we had no idea what the words were until Mike Anderson, determined to find the answer, went to the library and reviewed old copies of The Exponent until he found them. Before then, we only knew “U! A! H!” at the point you hear below.

We are the Chargers who wear Blue and White
We have the courage and the strength to fight!
Shout the battle cry: U – A – H !
Have pride in your Blue and White!

[Sorry, Pep Band: “Let’s hear it for the Blue and White!” is wrong.]

This is repeated once, with the I in white held until …

After the UAH score count:
Once the Fight Song is over, everyone holds an “Oohhhhhhhhh” somewhere around A3 until the goal scoring is announced. Sometimes that goes longer than others, and stagger breathing is used to keep from passing out. [Seriously, it’s gone on 45 seconds before.] Once the scoring is announced, you’ll hear a “1! 2! 3! 4!” and “We Want More!” by whoever has fundamentally taken the charge of cheering that night. Then we count the number of goals we have on the board at that point, followed by:

2nd goal: 2,4,6,8, who do we appreciate? (goalie), (goalie), (goalie) [Credit goes to Robert Krueger more than two decades ago—I thought I was old!]

3rd goal: Sieve, sieve, sieve, …

4th goal: 2,4,6,8, who do we appreciate? (goalie), (goalie), (goalie)

5th goal, or go ahead goal late: It’s all your fault (goalie), It’s all your fault (goalie), with one guy shouting the goalie’s name while everyone else takes a breath at the beat

6th goal: 2,4,6,8, who do we appreciate (goalie), (goalie), (goalie) — you getting the pattern?

7th goal: TOUCHDOWN, UAH! [you see, we don’t have a football team…]

8th goal: 2,4,6,8, who do we appreciate (goalie), (goalie), (goalie)

9th goal: You just suck! You just suck! You just suck! [to be fair, we only get this high if we’re playing a club team, and it’s almost mean to chant at them]

Time Related Cheers:

At 1:05 remaining in any period: “Hey (PA announcer), how much time is left?” This gets us to the PA announcement of, “There’s one minute remaining in the (1st|2nd|3rd) period,” to which we respond, “THANK YOU!” We cheer whenever we’re acknowledged, but the PA announcer at the Yost (whom we shamelessly stole this from) responds with a, “You’re welcome,” at which we “YAAYY!” like the goofballs that we are.

15:00 remaining in the third period: The World’s Longest Cheer. It’s more appropriately “College Hockey’s Longest Cheer”, as “The University of Alabama in Huntsville” is one character longer than “Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute”. As you might expect, we do a call and response of “Gimme a T!” “T!” all the way through, including “SPACE!” It takes a long time, more than 30 seconds, to do this. If you’re called on to do the call, be prepared to not speak loudly the next day.
All of that noise is followed with: “Now say it like a Marketing Major:” – “UAHuntsville!” followed by, “Now say it like an Engineer!” – “U A H – U A H – U A H” until it just sorta peters out. You’d think that we’d do it for a precise number of repeats, but we’re not that organized. This cheer comes from the old days, when “UAHuntsville” was the new name for the school, and Andrew “Derf” Judge broke out the “marketing major” line at the next game. Comedy gold.

With 2:00 left in regulation and a lead of at least two goals in the second game when we’re going for a sweep, you are to remove your keys from your pocket and repeatedly jangle them while chanting, “Warm up the bus!” Sometimes the backup goalie’s name is mentioned in the off-beat; if pulled, the starter’s name is always used.
We often have alternatives to the “bus”. Air Force gets “jet”, Robert Morris gets “wagon”, and whatever else comes to mind. If you’ve got a great idea for something, call it out prior to the 2:00 point. Why do we this? We get “warm up the tractor” on the road, especially at Niagara.

General Purpose Cheers:

It’s become regular of late (2012) that the first call-and-response is, “What do we want to do, boys?” “Kill! Kill! Kill!” “What makes the ice melt?” “(insert other team’s mascot) Blood! As an example, if we’re facing hated rival Bemidji State, it’s “BEA-VER BLOOD!” The goal is to fit the mascot into two syllables. This doesn’t always work.
This is often followed with some maroon shouting, “Stab him with your skate!” The author would like to attribute this to one Paul Lindgren, who famously (and we expect semi-drunkenly) shouted this one night in the 2004 time range. We were all taken aback at first, but then we adopted it.

We have the time-honored, somewhat bland cheers that you’d expect: “Fight Char-gers, Fight Char-gers, Fight! Fight! Fight! U! A! H!“, “Let’s go Chargers, let’s go!“, and “Let’s go Char-gers! (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)” We try to make this one less generic early in a period in making each beat very, very slow, then speeding up as time goes by. This is often repeated until it’s too fast to say, “Let’s go, Char-gers!” and the clapping has become painful.

There’s a common call-and-response of “BLUE!” “WHITE!” where everyone joins after picking a side; it gets faster as time goes by. Whoever starts the cheer has the option of reversing it to cause confusion. This is generally done by the “BLUE!” gal.

When we need a little jump (because the previous one hasn’t worked in getting everyone amped), someone will start us off with, “We want one more goal!“, with everyone joining in for, “Two more goals! Three more goals! LOTS MORE GOALS!. In overtime, this changes to “We want one more goal!“, “One more goal! One more goal! ONE! MORE! GOAL!“.

Off-Color Chants:
That NCAA read that they make before every game. No one has ever gotten in trouble except me; I got run from the building for dropping an F-bomb in an appropriate place. Most of the time, Security goes easy on us. It’s just one-legged Zamboni drivers that get us in trouble. Anyway. These chants are off-color, but they happen, so you need to know about them. [Yeah, that’s it. That’s the ticket. Forewarned is forearmed.]

“Gimme an S!” “S!” “Gimme an E!” “E!” “Gimme an X!” “X!” “What’s that spell?” “SEX!” “What’s it mean?” “SCORE! SCORE! SCORE!” The next used to be optional, but now it’s standard: “Now do it hardcore!” “S-E-X-X-X! SCORE! SCORE! SCORE!” Some combination of Jim Chaloupka, George Olden, and Doug “Pucky” Childs brought that addition about.

“Rape! Kill! Pillage and burn!” “(Eat babies!) …” I maintain that it’s “Loot” instead of “Kill”. I attempted to shout this down for five seasons. I never won. I haven’t acquiesced: I just don’t say anything. [I’m abusing my editorial power.]

If the refs are being real jerks, we will break out with a chorus of, “Who’s your faa-ther, who’s your faa-ther, who’s your faaaaaaaaa-ther, referee? You don’t know him, you don’t have one, you’re a bastard, referee!” I stole this one from (I think) UNO’s Red Army; the first time I sang it, there were a few laughs and mostly stunned silence. They joined in for the next rendition. It’s so bad, it’s good.

If the ref has been bad all game and makes a questionable call in the third, someone will inevitably shout, “Hey ref, are you pregnant? You’ve missed the last two periods!”

In the same vein comes, “Hey ref, get off your knees! You’re blowing the game!” I also frown on this one in light of You Can Play. In fact, that goes for all homosexual references; I’m leaving this in here because they do happen, and I want to address the problem by using an example.

Special Teams-Related:
We have this history of taking penalties. We used to be one of the most-penalized teams in college hockey, to the point that it became a self-fulfilling prophecy. No home crowd is ever kind to referees; we are no different.

Whenever we take a penalty: boo the call. Sometimes someone will go, “Oh hush, that was a good call,” and we’ll call off the dogs. My take is that we want to rip the refs when they deserve it.

When they take a penalty: Whoever sees the penalty will start it as soon as it’s clear: “YOU! FEEL! SHAME!” This is repeated until the player has entered the box and turned around, and then he’s invited to “Sit down, HACK!” Then someone (usually me, unless I need vocal rest) will shout, “See you in two minutes, [usually something not very nice]!“, to which everyone responds, “Or less!” If you’re shouting, it’s often appropriate to make the [something not very nice] relate to the penalty. As an example, “you dirty hooker” is a valid choice. If you choose profanity, be ready to be run from the building. If I’m really, really pissed off, I have been known to use “Monday-Friday”, and I’m always ready to go. Amazingly, that’s never gotten me in trouble. My favorite of late is “jackass”, because it appears in the Bible.

Whenever :05 is left on our penalty: “Hey (PA guy), why are the (other guys) afraid?” When the PA guy responds with, “The Chargers are back at full strength!”, we respond with, “We were never down!” If we were down 5×3, we go with, “What else is new?” after the “the Chargers are now skating 5-on-4” call. [Note: either chant usually is dropped if we’ve had two ore more PPGs scored on us in a game.]

Whenever :05 is left on their penalty: “Hey (PA guy), what’s what smell?” After the response of, “(other guys) are at full strength,” we respond, “and BEMIDJI STILL SUCKS!” I don’t remember who yelled this first, but it was genius.

Whenever one of their guys has done something egregious and you see the referees making the minor/major call (specifically for boarding, kneeing, and checking from behind), we repeat, “E-JECT!” until they make a decision. Alternately, it’s “GIVE HIM FIVE!” If someone is run, it’s time for, “Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye!” until they’ve disappeared down the tunnel.

If we’re killing a penalty, we chant, “DE-FENSE! (clap clap)” until we’ve cleared the puck or play is stopped. We chant this until the puck crosses the center line, when we switch to “SHORT-HANDED GOAL! (beat)” We like to think that this encourages the forecheckers to score.

Ref-Related Chants:

If you’re blind and you know it you’re the ref
If you’re blind and you know it you’re the ref
If you’re blind and you know it then your calls will surely show it
If you’re blind and you know it you’re the ref

This sometimes goes as “If you’re a moron and you know it, raise your hand“

The ref trips himself
The ref trips himself
I don’t know how he does it but
The ref trips himself

A rope, a tree, all we needs a referee .. (repeat) This is a standard, but I don’t like advocating hanging in Alabama.

I’m blind, I’m deaf, I wanna be a ref .. (repeat)

Two head-up-your ass references: “Zebra, zebra, short and stout: find your head and pull it out!” and “Hey ref, your proctologist called! He found your head!” Some say it’s “whistle” and not “head”.

If the ref gets in the way of the puck or one of our players, we chant, “Move, ref! Get out the way, get out the way!” Yeah, a bunch of nerds are stealing from Ludacris.

There’s an alternating cheer that I don’t like for what should be obvious reasons, but I’ll add it anyway for completeness: “REF season!” “ZEBRA season!” goes until it peters out. I bet this one started with zebra season first.

Goalie Taunts:
Oh, messing with the other team’s goalie. It’s the raison d’être of every heckling fanbase. We’ve shamelessly stolen these over the years.

When the goalie takes his mask off to drink: “Ugly goalie!” (repeated until he puts it back on), followed by “Thank you!” Additionally, there’s:U-G-L-Y You ain’t got no aliby you ugly (uh huh) you ugly
M-O-M-M-A how you think you got that way your momma (uh huh) your momma
Y-G-L-U Backwards you is ugly too you ugly (uh huh) you ugly
B-A-B-Y Babies look at you and cry (uh huh) you ugly

Whenever the goalie leaves the net during play: “EMP-TY NET!” until he returns, followed by, “Still an empty net!“

Whenever the goalie sweeps snow from the crease during a stoppage: “SWEEP!” until he stops.

Whenever the goalie leaves his net to skate around a little bit and keep his legs fresh: “Skate!” on repeat until he “TUUUUUUUURN!“s, followed by more skating until it’s time to “STOP!“. Once the goalie is ready to take his place, there’s “Assume the position!” If there’s a delay, someone will say, “Bend ooooo-ver!” George Olden gets credit for that last one. There used to be some additional homosexual banter, but thankfully we’ve stopped that.

Whenever the goalie drinks from his water bottle: “Drink!” is chanted until he stops, at which point it’s either “Spit!” or “Swallow!” Again, that’s very much on the line.

Whenever our goalie is killing it and theirs isn’t: (point to our goalie) “Goalie!” (point to their goalie) “Sieve!” This is repeated until play is resumed or we just tire of it.

The “phone call” gag: This works in hockey circles if the press box has a loud-ringing phone. Whenever it goes, you go for a run at, “Hey (goalie)! Your mom called! She left a message: it said, YOU SUCK!” “Mom” becomes “Dad”, “Your junior coach”, and usually a cow. The coach says, “YOU SUCK! And how’d you get a scholarship?” The cow, unsurprisingly, says, “Mooooooooooo.”

I’m not whom stole this one from:
“Hey goalie, you’re not a sieve, you’re a funnel!You’re not a funnel, you’re a vacuum!
You’re not a vacuum, you’re a black hole!
You’re not a black hole, you just suck!
“You just suck!” is repeated until it peters out. Sometimes “Hoover” replaces “vacuum”.

The door man taunt: “DOOOOOOR-MAAAN!” is appropriate when 1) the starter is replaced or 2) the Saturday starter sucks, regardless of how the Friday starter does. When whichever starter is really struggling, you may hear “PUT IN THE BACKUP!“

That about does it. If you think of anything we’ve missed, email me at g@uahhockey.com.