Responsible communication about feelings"He made me feel unimportant"You let another person's behavior or words change how you feel about yourself?The event is not the cause of feelings. The cause of feelings is the meaning you give an event.( Thank you RET and CBT)No other human being is responsible for your feelings or your reaction. That's on you.Feelingsdon't happen to you. If you believe that they happen to you, you're likely giving up more control than you have to.​

When you believe that the outside (external ) world is the cause of your emotions, we call that perspective "External locus of control ."This perspective tends to be found in people who had been victimized and may be depressed. The ability to see life from this perspective and then try on the internal locus, can be very helpful. Imagine getting stuck in a mindset wherein you always see yourself as victim, no matter the reality of the situation. Now imagine that you are in control of how you look at your world.It's like having a new tool, a tool that gets the jobdone faster and better.