What is proper wedding gift etiquette for a second marriage?

A:

According to an article in the New York Times by Peggy Post, director of the Emily Post Institute, guests at a second wedding who gave gifts at either the bride's or the groom's first wedding shouldn't be expected to bring a gift the second time around. However, gifts are mandatory at bridal showers, no matter how many weddings the bride has had.

Keep Learning

This rule holds even if it is been years or even decades since the first wedding. Some guests prefer to bring a gift even if gifts are not requested or wanted. As gracious hosts, the bride and groom are obligated to make them feel comfortable doing so.

With a second marriage, it is likely the bride or groom or both has an established household. In order to not have two of everything, or plates and silverware in the wrong pattern, it is appropriate to establish a small registry. It is also fine to ask guests who wish to bring a gift to donate to a charity or toward a honeymoon fund instead of bringing a gift. While the wedding invitation is not the place to include information about gifts or registries, it is fine to put a small section about the gift policy on a wedding website along with a link to a registry. It is also perfectly fine to handle it the old-fashioned way: using word-of-mouth.

When unsure whether or not to bring a gift, guests should opt for a small gift, particularly something personal like a small family heirloom. Even a bottle of wine will suffice.

Related Questions

Bridal shower versions of the popular category-based game Scattergories can choose to use the words "bride" and "groom" as the letter-generating elements, or they can use the names or initials of the bride and groom. Bridal shower Scattergories games typically choose categories themed to weddings, marriage, honeymoons or romance.

For a traditional Jewish wedding, the groom must give the bride a ring made of solid gold without any stones or gems. The ring cannot have anything cut through it completely because an unbroken ring symbolizes commitment to the marriage. The ring can be engraved with a phrase, which is typically written in Hebrew.

The best wedding toasts are sincere and come from the heart. Toasts should be personalized and last about three to five minutes. The toast should include something nice about both the bride and the groom, and it should also highlight the things that make the couple special and compatible.