Basically Ready In Seconds (and) Kickin’ Every Tastebud Sure… You could probably come up with at least twenty billion (or more?) foods that can be ready in next to no time AND make you want to jump in front of a bus for… But I highly doubt BRISKET* (did you catch on to my acronym) is on that list of consumables. Sure… If you’re NOT a vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian/meat-free eater… BRISKET* (and it’s undeniably delicious aroma) PROBABLY brainwashes you into wanting to risk your life in a [Read On!]

Yep. You read that correctly. So no point in making an appointment to get your eyes checked. Really, though… I am more just typing this out for myself because… WHA…?! I am in UTTER DISBELIEF! I am FINALLY getting my GIRAFFE, I have ALWAYS DREAMED OF GETTING?!?! WHAT?! WHEN!? WHO?! HUH?! I’m sure those thoughts are typically what circulate through your brain when you read any of my blog posts… So just to clarify… I’m NOT actually hopping on an airplane this weekend [Read On!]

My apologies for leaving you stranded in the middle of the Ionian Sea. Honestly, though… I am not sure I am actually sorry… Because some of my favorite experiences happened out there. But here I am, to rescue you, so hop on this life preserver boat (I know, my nautical terminology is SPOT ON…), and I will take you first to… Katakolon & Olympia… So we can explore where dudes used to run around ass naked competing with one another (I.E. Where [Read On!]

Do you remember what it was like to take your first EVER bite from an EXTRA LARGE cup of Dippin’ Dots? For me, that experience (when I was, maybe 6?) was insanely mind-blowing, as I felt as though I blasted off into an alternate universe where only delicious mouth parties exist… Well, my experience of getting the BEST brain freeze of my life, thanks to shoveling in Mint Chocolate Chip Dippin’ Dots way too quickly, pretty much mirrors my experience aboard [Read On!]

I am going to have to ask you to BUCKLE UP… Because we are about to go on a little (and when I say little, I actually mean BIG)… ROAD TRIP! Ready? OK! Lets TALLY-HO! Oh wait, no… We are NOT about to go on a fox hunt… And we are definitely NOT bringing any dogs with us. However, the reason for my mentioning that phrase is because it’s definition to me is… “Let’s get going”… And it’s quite suiting for where exactly [Read On!]

As much as you may not want to admit it… You’ve totally thought about what competition reality show you’d CRUSH like GODZILLA! You can’t say you’ve never filled out an on-line application… Only to delete it because you snapped out of your momentary lapse in insanity… To: Gain a BIG BROTHER… Prance around NAKED AND AFRAID… Jump into a SHARK TANK… Get CHOPPED… Or even stick your fist in your mouth for THE BACHELOR. Oh, so you still don’t want to tell [Read On!]

I’ve told you this before and I know you’ve seen it first hand in my videos, but I am going to reiterate it once again… My mind wanders off ALL… THE… TIME… It loves to just stroll away like an angry toddler from his/her parents. Thankfully no amber alerts ever need to be called for my brain, cause I have purchased a leash for it. A few examples of my brain acting like a bit of a vagabond, though… When I [Read On!]

I’d be lying if I told all of you that… I AM SMOOTH LIKE BUTTA in social situations… Or just in general. And we all know that I would NEVER lie to any of you (in fact, I am a little TOO blunt at times)… So truthfully, I am about as smooth as the surface of the moon… When it comes to… Um, yeah, dealing with this thing called life. People who have met me, seen my YouTube videos, follow [Read On!]

Look at you riding in on your SPARKLING regal white thoroughbred stallion… Oh wait… Is that just an obnoxiously stubborn braying gray mule? Well, whatever. I appreciate you trying to channel your inner Old Spice Guy to come help me! That being said… I have to confess… I am the type of person who hates asking for help. HATES IT. If I were hanging off the edge of a 500-foot glacier… Fingers slipping because I am known for being quite the “butterfingers” (which [Read On!]

I am 10,000% POSITIVE that ALL OF YOU have wished at one point or another that you could “DO OVER” at least one crappy instance/decision/event in your life… For instance… Do any of these situations ring a bell: “Why the heck did I think it would be a GOOD idea to agree to watch my neighbor’s four-year-old sextuplets while she’s on a week-long cruise through the Mediterranean… The day after I get my infected MUST COME OUT NOW wisdom teeth [Read On!]

Want to play a game… GAH! I just gave myself the heebie-jeebies! Any who… The below “game” does not consist of puzzles and riddles in order for your survival… PROMISE! I just want to know: What type of grocery shopper are you? Are you the type who… A. Makes a detailed list of everything you need, and mark down which aisle each item is in, so you can get in and get out faster than Usain Bolt runs the 100 M dash? [Read On!]