Servers, that is! After several years and literally dozens of visitors I’ve decided to consolidate things onto a single hosting account. I’ll be losing some of the community features offered by WordPress.com, but I’ll be gaining a hell of lot more control and, overall, a cheaper bill to boot.

So, I’m not really sure how this works, to be honest. I believe that if you’ve already subscribed to updates, that you’ll continue to receive them. If not, please visit DepressedPress.com and re-subscribe!

You know what makes a good love story? When you can’t decide if the people involved are assholes or not, that’s what. If they’re clearly assholes then it’s easy: they don’t deserve love and it’s a bad love story. If they’re clearly not assholes then it’s also easy: they’ll get love but it won’t matter because it’s not real and it’s a bad love story. On the other hand, if you’re honestly not sure there’s a good chance that those characters may be worth caring about. Real people are assholes sometimes and a good love story needs real people.

This was our third selection for Boiled Eggs and Brain Eaters 2014. It wasn’t good. It was, in fact, so not good that I needed to watch it again. I literally could not remember enough about it to start this review.

The only thing they did right was plastering Danny Trejo [IMDB] on the box. That’s honestly the only reason we, and I assume others, watched the movie. Seeing Levar Burton’s [IMDB] name was just icing on the cake. Of course neither one of them really stars (although Burton’s comes much closer than Trejo) and most of the time is spent in other locations with other people.

Kids suck, amirite or amirite? I mean you’re perfectly happy living your life, spending your disposable income and sleeping through the night. You want to go out; you go out! You want to beat “Final Fantasy VII” in a sitting; you do it! Then, out of nowhere, BAM! Then, nine-months later it all goes to hell. The crying, diaper changing and total lack of privacy. And don’t get me started on the enduring antisocial behavior, diminished empathy and remorse, and disinhibited or bold behavior!

This is a completely formula, by-the-numbers family film. Bright, colorful animated characters voiced by famous people. Lots of jokes with popular references. Fast action! A simple plot! A super-sappy emotional message!