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Pre-Turkey Dinner Workout. Then indulge ONLY in food that is worth it with no guilt. Food is not bad or good. We attach those feelings to food. If you eat something indulgent enjoy every bite. You ARE worth it.

I came to NYC to work for a production company three years ago. The limo picked me up & took me through the Lincoln Tunnel.

Little did I know that was yet another metaphor for my life. Going through the tunnel would lead me to a life I never imagined. Or maybe I did imagine it, i just never never imagined I’d act on it.

I remember feeling nervous excitement during that ride through the tunnel. I soaked it up knowing that as soon as I hit the end of the tunnel my life would never be the same.

I recently went through that same tunnel. All the feelings of my first time through came flooding back. The only difference is this time at the end of the tunnel was my home.

I found my way through the darkness & not only found the light, but also found my home. I realized the light waiting for me at the end of the tunnel was coming from inside me, not anything or anyone outside of me.

I am the light.

My true self has been waiting for me at the end of every dark tunnel I’ve ever been through.

The light always comes. This I promise you. The tunnel won’t last forever. Some are longer, some are shorter, but there’s always a light at the end. You are the light.

I could go on & on. But I’d rather ask you this “Is whatever you say is hard about getting fit & healthy harder than waking up everyday hating the way you look in pictures? Harder than having no energy? Harder than the way you feel inside? Harder than none of your clothes fitting? Harder than avoiding social events because of the way you look? Harder than being the heaviest person in the room? Harder than having sex with the lights on or at all? Harder than having your life shortened by high blood pressure, diabetes & heart disease?

For me exercising is hard. Eating healthy is hard. But not as hard as when I hated myself for weighing 226lbs.

Time to stop hating. Time to get the outside your inside always wanted. Time to love yourself. You are worth it.

During my weight loss journey there were many victories along the way although the scale was not moving fast enough for my liking.

In the first three months, my blood pressure normalized for the first time in 5 years. My blood sugar stabilized & I was able to go off metformin. My lipid panel normalized so heart disease & heart attack were no longer a concern.

I could no longer eat the way I used to or I’d get severe heartburn, feel sluggish & cranky, especially if I skipped a workout.

I no longer hid in pictures. I wanted to go shopping for smaller size clothes.

My insides were healing & it was finally showing up on the outside.

I love hearing clients like the one in this video proclaim their nonscale victories for the first time...

When I weighed 226lbs my trainer would run around the building with me.

After I lost about 50lbs he would send me out to run alone. I asked him why he didn’t run with me anymore & he said “I ran with you in the beginning because I wasn’t sure you’d make it around the building even once”.

I felt like I would die running around that building when I was that heavy. He would say “Just start & before you know it you will be finished”.

But even after I lost weight, running was still a struggle for me. I’d get out of breath quick, and after 3 minutes I wanted to quit.

When my sis-in-law, a seasoned marathon runner, asked me to do a half marathon with her, for some odd reason,which is still unclear to me to this day, I said “ok”!

So the training began. Running 3-4 times a week with someone who is faster & more seasoned than me was frustrating & hurt my ego at times.

I kept at the training because I didn’t want to die running 13.1 miles. It scared the shit of me—13.1 miles is a lot more than the laps I had been running around the building.

Up to that point I’d only run a mile at most.

I pushed through even when I didn’t want to get up at 4:30 a.m. before the Tucson summer heat kicked in. A friend even told me I wasn’t built for running & I was too old to run my first half marathon.

I was determined to get myself to the starting line. Yes that’s right, the STARTING line not the finishing line.

I realized it’s much harder to get myself to the starting line; once the starting gun went off I’d knew I’d finish. For me the victory was not in finishing the race but actually starting the race.

I was begging God the night before to give me food poisoning or a broken toe or anything that would prevent me from getting to that starting line. Instead he gave me the gift of facing my fear & running right through it.

My first & only 11 mile run along the Hudson River on vacation. The night before I was at a scotch bar but I still got up & trained. I was dedicated to not dying the day of the half marathon. My fear was my biggest motivator.

Infertility was the catalyst for me getting fat, really fat, like 226lbs, 48% body fat kinda fat. My husband had a low sperm count so of course how does the infertility field treat male infertility? They pump us women full of unthinkable high doses of fertility drugs in the hopes we will grow an enormous amount of eggs, in the hopes one of the eggs will get fertilized by a single sperm (in my case they had to inject the sperm into the egg).

This is on my mind seeing that it’s Fathers Day. My former poor quality frozen embryo asked me why on earth would they treat male factor by putting a women through all that? Isn’t there a better way? Good question my smart girl asks. And I can’t believe 21 years later science still doesn’t have an answer & we still treat women for a man’s problem.

I can tell you that I would have done anything to get pregnant with a biological child. But now that the smoke has cleared & I have 15 years distance between that time I’m pissed. Not that I had a baby of course, but that I had to endure so much physically to compensate for a medical diagnosis my husband had. I’m not angry with him but at the medical field for having nothing better to offer us besides donor sperm. Seems like lazy science to me. Oh well, we don’t know how to make more sperm so let’s trash the woman’s body instead or take your male partner out of the equation.

Even my husband seems to have forgotten that I was treated for male factor infertility. Just recently he argued with me stating “No, you had endometriosis”. Yes, that’s true but only AFTER my body was repeatedly pumped full of hormones. Even my own reproductive endocrinologist said “We are putting gasoline on the fire with every cycle”.

My body will never be the same again. It was after my baby was born that the real problems began. Yet my pain, scars, layers of fat, mood swings, cancer scare, gaining 80lbs, post partum depression, breast feeding issues & hormonal nightmare led me exactly where I was supposed to go. Without it I wouldn’t be sitting here in my NYC apartment with my daughter making Fathers Day breakfast & blogging for a company I created. I wouldn’t have this incredibly rich, fulfilling life, and the daughter & career I have now.

Yes, it was hard. Yes, I was angry then & maybe even more angry now at science. However it was not as hard or angry as I would have been NOT trying for a biological baby.

So thank you lazy science for allowing me to take the road less travelled which led to me to life I was meant to live.

Simpatico Mind & Body

New York City-based Simpatico Mind & Body is a service designed by Lisa Ceizyk, a professional with firsthand experience when it comes to losing weight, getting fit, and most importantly, changing your mindset and your life. Simpatico's services include nutrition and fitness plans designed to work for your lifestyle. Lisa will meet you, train you at your home or in a location convenient to you or train you remotely, and most importantly, will provide the coaching, expertise, and encouragement to meet your goals, transform your body and your mindset, and give you the tools to stay fit for life.