Eedu Anubhavam – Aadi Aadi

From the preceding ‘Oonil Vaazh uyirae’ thiruvaimozhi, we get to know that Azhwar has experienced and enjoyed Divine Union as he refers to ‘parugik kalithEnE’ (பருகிக் களித்தேனே) in one of the pasurams. However, we also saw towards the end of the padhigam that Azhwar was overcome with grief once again- this time due to his inability to join the nityasuris (eternals) for sharing his experience. Overwhelmed with sorrow, Azhwar has now become unable to communicate his state of being all by himself and therefore summons the help of people close to him to convey his distress. Thus, we see Azhwar’s mother engaging in a dialogue with Emperuman and bringing the pitiable plight of Azhwar (who has currently assumed nayikA bhavam) to His attention.

This ‘Aadi Aadi’ thiruvaimozhi represents the third instance of Azhwar’s separation and its consequential dejection. The first case of separation was witnessed in the Amchiraya Madanaaraai thiruvaimozhi where Azhwar, unable to achieve a union with the Lord in His vibhava avataras, was atleast mentally strong enough to send birds as emissaries to communicate his message to Emperuman. The second case of separation was witnessed in the Vayum Thirai thiruvaimozhi where Azhwar, unable to bear the separation of Thirukkurungudi Nambi in his archavatara, resigned to the seashore and started assigning separation-related intentions to naturally-occurring events around him. We discussed in the context of the Vayum Thirai thiruvaimozhi that the dejection experienced therein was greater in magnitude to the one Azhwar experienced in Amchiraya Madanaaraai thiruvaimozhi. However, the grief experienced by Azhwar in this ‘Aadi Aadi’ padhigam outweighs the ones experienced in the earlier two instances because here Azhwar is unable to achieve a communion with the eternals – the company of whom Emperuman Himself cherishes.

The loss perceived by a person is proportionate to the value of his deprived possession. For example, we don’t see people who have lost money, gold or costly jewels grieving similarly because the extent of perceived loss in each of these cases is not at par. Similarly, the loss perceived by Azhwar in Amchiraya Madanaarai, Vayum Thirai and Aadi Aadi are not equal because the magnitude of separation in each of these cases is different.

If Azhwar’s overwhelming grief has its roots in his inability to commune with the eternals, why is Azhwar’s mother appealing to Emperuman and not to the eternals themselves?

Nampillai reasons this question out with an appropriate example. Just like a person who has been robbed off his belongings will resort to the ruler of the kingdom for justice, Azhwar’s mother has reached out to Emperuman to find answers to Azhwar’s distress. Hailing from a dispensation that does not seek favours from Emperuman, Azhwar’s mother asks Him: “Ye Lord who immediately comes to the rescue of those who art closer to Thee, what hath you in store for this poor lady who is writhing in pain of separation?”

Nampillai draws upon examples from Srimad Ramayana to drive home the intensity of Azhwar’s separation. Lord Rama was so overwhelmed with grief at His separation from Bharatha and Shatrugna that He considered Himself to be separated from Lakshmana as well (even though the latter accompanied Him to the forest). It was only after achieving the company of Guha that Lord Rama overcame His perceived separation from Lakshmana and Sita. Similarly, Azhwar perceived dejection because His inability to commune with the eternals in Paramapadam outweighed the divine experience he achieved in union with the Lord.

Thus, Nampillai points out to us that Azhwar is not alone in grieving over separation because the feeling is not alien to Emperuman Himself.