Addicted to sex

– “Doctor…Got to make love every night—my husband has to keep up with me.”

Solange X. is a gorgeous thirty something lady that has a loving husband and a small child, besides working as a busy manger in a local communications company. She consulted me a few months ago due to a painful bursitis in the right shoulder that she attributed to a fancy sexual pose she had tried with her partner a few days before. When I prescribed some anti-inflammatory medication and rest for a few days, she forthrightly told me that she would not stop her nightly risky maneuvering in bed.

The issue of “sex addiction” is being contested in professional circles at present, which led to a fight whether to include that entity in the DSM III; the lack of clear cut evidence finally tipped the balance against including it as a new diagnosis in it. An addiction implies the existence of two main factors, which are the following:

The search for a compensation or pleasure

The existence of a conflict surrounding this behavior

An addiction is different than an obsessive-compulsive behavior because in the latter there is not the acquisition of pleasure as the final goal. Some psychologists argue that in addictions, the abnormal behavior can produce physical/psychological harm. The obsession for food and gambling were recognized as abnormal clinical entities.

Dr. Walter Guedin, a psychiatrist specializing in Sexology in Buenos Aires said: “in the addiction to sex the desire is mixed with the impulse, pleasure with anxiety, the temptation with moral values, danger or the risk sensation with the self-preservation. The addiction to sex is an irrepressible, repetitive behavior that carries the stigma of guilt and sensation of void that appear once the sexual tension has come down.”

After patiently listening to Solange’s explanation, I looked into her eyes and said:

– “Do you lift you baby in your arms to play with him or look into his eyes?’

– “Of course, all the time… When I come back from work, it’s the first thing I do.”

– “Well, there you are…If you don’t wear a sling for a few days and avoid stressful situations for your right shoulder, you might not be able to do it in the future…”

She demurred for two seconds and then replied: “all right…I’ll follow your advice.”

Nice post, dottore. Let me add there are different types of sexual addictions: addiction to pornography, masturbation, BDSM (please consider for a post), prostitution, etc, signs being emotional or physical. Lots of people who suffer from this condition are actually afraid of being abandoned and may as a result stay in an unhealthy relationship or/and are prone to changing partners more often than usual.
I read once about the physical sex addict symptoms, which I find particularly interesting, one of them being feeling immobilized as a result of these obsessions. What do you think, dottore?

Good morning and thanks for your commentary my dear Bo. I confess that I feel that this is kind of a creepy discussion, very fitting for the subject… I don’t want to talk about it now as we are still celebrating the anniversary of my son. Let me continue to enjoy one of the greatest moments of our lives. Un baccione. Arrivederci!