Junior high popularity not all it's cracked up to be

Or, as a recent study put it: "Early adolescent pseudomature behavior predicted long-term difficulties in close relationships, as well as significant problems with alcohol and substance use, and elevated levels of criminal behavior."

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Of course, these studies were set up by FREAKING NERDS who dress like their mommies bought their clothes for them at Sears and don't know how to fucking walk down the hallway without looking like total loser freaks. You know who is going to end up screwed and drunk? Goddamn loser scientist nerds, who get paid so little they can't afford hot cars and go to science conferences instead of VEGASSSSSS!