The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post

The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post.Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy.www.philevans.co.uk

................................

WHAT’S ALL THE WHO-HA?

Since Peter Capaldi announced that, after four years he’s leaving the role of Doctor Who once he’s filmed the 2017 Christmas special, there’s been much speculation about who should succeed him as the Time Lord.The fervour and excitement surrounding this story has been so great, questions have even been raised in the House. Not the House of Commons. The house of my mate Terry – a ‘Whovian’. No, he’s not half-man, half-vacuum cleaner. A Whovian is a dedicated Doctor Who fan(atic).They’re sometimes called other things - but this is a family newspaper.The questions raised by Terry – and the media - were the same ones asked when the previous two Doctors (David Tennant and err . . . cough . . . umm . . . wotsisname) admitted they’d had enough of being chased around Cardiff by a BBC Wales camera crew every Saturday night as they routinely saved the Universe with the aid of little more than a witty remark, a knowing smile and a screwdriver that’s almost as versatile as a Swiss army knife.The Doctor also has unseen help in scaring-off alien monsters in the form of the relentless, bombastic musical accompaniment of the National Orchestra Of Wales.The musicians always give the impression that the louder and faster they play, the more money they get. Perhaps they spend it all on aspirins?Prior to seeing a couple of the Capaldi episodes last year, I hadn’t watched Doctor Who for decades. It was so long ago, the Doctor was still making house calls.I stopped watching the show after sitting through a video tape of six episodes back-to-back and suddenly realised I needed something that I’d never have access to while I remained a Doctor Who fan.A life! Anyway, these were the questions raised by Terry The Whovian and the entire British media . . . Why can’t the next Doctor Who be a woman?Why can’t the next Doctor Who be played by a black actor?Why can’t the next Doctor Who be played by a black actress?All valid and worth considering.But I just wonder . . . if Doctor Who is ever played by an actress, could it lead to other fictional male characters changing their sex?Will our TV schedules and multiplexes treat us to the adventures of . . . Jane BondShirley HolmesMary PotterFreda KruegerLucy SkywalkerJudith Ben-HurMad MaxineDarth AdaAnd . . . Indy Anna Jones.Let me know if you think of any more . . .

-------------------

Call centres:

It’s safe to say that I’m not a big fan of call centres, or cold callers, despite the fact that everyone has to make a living. But I draw the line when unsolicited calls from such establishments come through on my mobile phone.My mobile number is only known to close friends and family. So how did that happen?Our privacy is slowly but surely being eroded.The caller advised that he had information on me that indicated I was due substantial compensation having been mis-sold PPI (payment protection insurance). He said that the information that he had was accurate and had been provided by a regulated and reliable source and I just needed to answer a few personal questions.So being me, I played along. He then wanted to know my address.Then my previous mortgage companies. It was then that I reminded him that it would be rather foolish of me to provide personal and sensitive information to a stranger over the phone.He got annoyed and hung up on me. I know I have never been mis-sold any financial products in the past, so the gentleman was clearly lying and not even very good at it.Now I have even less tolerance of call centres.

------------------------

The Good Old NHS:

Research has shown that we spend four days a year searching for a car parking space - unless you’re in Morriston hospital car park, then it’s four days a week! No doubt, it will continue to be for years to come as the challenges faced with parking seem to be increasing on a regular basis.Millions have been spent on new buildings and improved services, which it provides for thousands of patients in Wales and beyond. The Morriston site is home to many unsung heroes, with a passion for making a difference, despite being stretched to the limit and grossly underfunded.The overworked staff are stretched to the limit, but still manage to do a great job, many of whom perform at a level over and above the normal call of duty. Last week, it was announced that the infamous ‘bubble tunnel’ was being demolished. A tunnel that resembled that of the NASA space centre, built to link the old hospital with the new.Something I personally have memories of as a child.Yes, the heat in that tunnel in the summer was reminiscent of my grandfather’s greenhouse. So what’s the difference between DFS and the NHS?Well, apparently you’ll find more beds in DFS!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A well known former Llanelli landlady has celebrated her 100th birthday with family and friends.On Wednesday Mrs Nesta Williams enjoyed a tea party at Y Bwthyn care home in Bigyn, Llanelli, where she has lived since 2007.
She has two daughters Anne and Joan, two grandchildren and great grandchildren.Mrs Williams was the landlady of the Bull Inn in Anne Street, Llanelli, in the 1950s and 1960s and her late first husband was one of the first people in Wales to open a boxing gym for youngsters.Y Bwthyn manager Heike Clarke said Mrs Williams was quite a character.“She has been here a long time and is part of our family at Y Bwthyn,” she added.Mrs Williams’ daughter Anne Obern said: “My mother’s first marriage was to my father Emlyn Rees who was one of the first to open a boxing gym above the Mansel pub and had three Welsh Champions. He died when he was 46.“My mother worked in service for Mr Davies the Magistrates Clerk and went to work for the brewery. They were asked if they would like t…

Former Gower MP Gareth Wardell was the guest speaker at the weekly meeting of Llanelli Rotary Club held at the Stradey Park Hotel.
Mr Wardell gave an illuminating address, weaving comparisons between his job as a politician and his late father's job as a Tumble barber.
It was an amusing, highly-entertaining and thought-provoking address.
Mr Wardell, now 69, won the Gower constituency seat in a Parliamentary by-election in 1982.
The Labour MP held the seat until his retirement in 1997.
He now works as a public affairs consultant in Wales.
Mr Wardell's Parliamentary term was largely in opposition to Margaret Thatcher's Conservative Government. But his did make a significant contribution by being the youngest MP to chair the Welsh Affairs Select Committee.
Mr Wardell recognised that in the 'fame stakes' he may have played second fiddle to his father, Jack, who was one of the UK's oldest barbers and who cut and styled hair for almost 80 years.
Jack Wardell learned …

A Garnant garden is in full bloom, in special memory of a much-loved character who is sorely missed in the community.Bus driver Mark Withers sadly died in May 2013, after a brave fight against cancer. He was known and loved by many, and the whole community got behind him when he starred in the very first series of the popular TV programme The Great British Bake Off.So, when his wife Elaine and son Jethro decided to do something special in his memory, they were not short of helping hands.Their story features on the front cover of Carmarthenshire County Council’s Tenant 2 Tenant magazine, which is written by council tenants.Elaine wanted to talk about her garden project as part of the council’s Pride In Your Patch project, which is part of the council’s £220millionCarmarthenshire Homes Standard investment.“My husband was quite a character locally, and people loved him wherever he went - to say it has been hard without him is an understatement, I miss him every day,” said Elaine.“When he…