Because there are just a lot of men out there who really need to believe they made the baby by having an orgasm, and that no one should credit the person who gained weight, contributed a quarter of her daily nutrients for 9 months, threw up a lot, saw her feet change size, and then pushed an 8 pound human out of her genitals while suffering massive pain. Because if you admit that bitches can pull that stunt off, you might have to admit that they’re good at other things, too.

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8 thoughts on “Yes, let’s definitely congratulate the sperm”

Outrageous! This is clearly an attack on sexual equality and should be condemned by all. Some may say it is merely a bit of humour (as it depicts a cartoon sperm wearing goggles and is written on a cake), but they are wrong. Being as we all know that the person who made the cake made no efforts at all to congratulate the mother and/or couple in any other context, we can instantly denounce this heinous dessert as an example of rampant females.

If we’re going to congratulate people for simply having performed a natural biological function which (as history and the world’s population clearly shows) doesn’t require any particular intelligence, training, or thought, we might as well congratulate both parties.

J-Bro– fair enough when it comes to conception. Congratulations on conception are a little odd in most cases– though they do make more sense if someone has had to work at it (spending money, time, effort, etc.).