Week 89: Filler Language – #AlphaFemaleFriday

Before going on an interview, you may do a mock interview with a trusted friend or film yourself and observe the way you speak. Your wonderfully honest friend, or the painfully honest video, will not lie about your odd quirks. Everyone has them. Some people may enunciate certain words for no reason, over-gesticulate, or simply fumble and trip over their words. When we get nervous, we may end up using filler language.

By filler language, I mean the “um”, “uh”, “you see” transition that only fills the space between your last coherent thought to the next. Think about this: would you rather the space be filled a five-second silence, or be filled with an awkward, “you knowwwwwww….?” The other person is probably thinking, “either this person is very nervous or they really don’t know their stuff.”

Everyone does filler language from time-to-time. It’s all about managing it and keeping it at bay. In the same way we may be a salty swearer outside of the workplace, we should do our best to curtail foul language among our peers and clients. Keep it to yourself and keep it professional. I’ve found that the occasional silence allows two main things to happen: it allows everyone to have a moment to think over what is being said or if they should say something next, and it also adds a certain gravitas to the words being spoken. In the words of Depeche Mode, “enjoy the silence.”

Cheers,

Kelly

@AlphaFemSociety tweets by @KellyRGonzales

About:

Each week, I take a tip from Lois P. Frankel’s book, Nice Girls Still Don’t Get the Corner Office, and explore how each of these tips affect myself and other women in similar positions on the road to becoming the women we want to be. There are far and few between who are a few steps behind me, and many more who are far advanced. I found that Lois P. Frankel’s advice applied to novice, intermediates, and experts alike. It helped me see that I was already doing right, served as a reminder to keep on doing what I was doing and how to keep that momentum going. The book also showed me areas where I could improve, and gave realistic tips to jump on board. There are a total of 133 tips, and explore one tip per week in a program I call: 133 Weeks to Success.

Join the movement using the hashtag #133WeeksToSuccess with posts which are posted every #AlphaFemaleFriday.