Difficult Feels Terrific!

Yup. When we actually do (rather than just think about it) something that feels difficult, we get a feeling and energy burst that is…..terrific!

This Sunday morning of May 1st, it was pouring rain and 36 degrees out. Many of you know that an integral part of my morning architecture is walking my dogs. I’ve done this since 1989, with exceptions only when on crutches or away from home. No matter the weather, we go get it!

This has afforded me the opportunity to walk in extreme sub-zero temps, gale force winds, blizzards, rainstorms and all the other weather permutations in Massachusetts in Colorado. It’s sometimes tempting to think, “ah, the dogs could just go out in the back yard, and I’ll exercise later at the gym. What’s the harm of skipping one day?”

This is just the kind of thinking that makes us less than we can be. Conversely, when we choose to do something difficult, it makes us a little stronger, more resilient, and yes, even happier. Why? We are questing animals – we enjoy overcoming a challenge, small or large. And sometimes, that challenge is mostly our own procrastination, laziness, comfort, fear, conflict avoidance, or – fill in the blank with your own recipe for Resistance.

Comfort is seductive, but it is not productive. It can be the Anti-Growth sentiment! Being willing to practice discomfort makes us stronger, preparing us for the most difficult things we’ll encounter in life. Like a muscle with exercise, motivating ourselves to do something we’re resisting both causes us stress and makes us feel great after we do it.

For a few minutes this morning, my resistance to walking in the cold, pouring rain showed up as having a cup of coffee and checking email. Once I was out there with Imp and Linc, though, I felt pleased with my commitment, happy to exercising with my pals, and appreciated the moisture in our alpine desert environment that is greening up the landscape. It was actually wonderful! I’m in a ridiculously good mood now, which allowed me to lend emotional support to a couple of people who are feeling enormously tense. I also feel psyched to go drive in the rain to the gym – this kind of resilience builds upon itself.

A few ways to practice:

Have a challenging conversation you’ve been putting off.

Walk across the cold floor instead of putting slippers on.

Work through something you don’t know how to do, and hang with the frustration.

Fast for a day, or even skip just one meal.

When you’re successful at doing anything that feels difficult, mark it! Many dog trainers use “clickers” to mark a desired behavior, and I do that for myself, too. Give yourself whatever version of an “Attagirl!” works for you. Then build on that success. Soon, doing difficult things will become a source of pride, and even fun.

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Testimonials

Ginger – You rocked!

We got a lot out of your facilitation and approach. Your energy and thoughtfulness matched what was needed in Bravo Forum on this retreat. Thanks for making what you do feel effortless on our journey to becoming bad ass.

We will continue the conversations!

Jeff Pruitt
YPO Phoenix
CEO, Tallwave Capital

Jeff Pruitt

“Ginger provided really fantastic and well received coaching training for our management team: we laughed, we cried, and we learned a lot. Ginger provoked us to take a deeper look at our own values and preconceptions. Her ability to deliver effective coaching skills in a concise and direct manner—coupled with fun but meaningful hands-on exercises to underscore the teaching—provided us with a great set of tools to aid in our quest for improving our high-performance culture.”

Betsy FitzpatrickDirector of Human Resources, StoneAge, Inc.

“Prior to working with Ginger I was chronically frustrated with my inability to accomplish my objectives as effectively as I knew I could. Just as frustrating was the fact that – when exploring where the breakdowns occurred – I realized that it was ME (not a dearth of time or a shortage of good options or ideas) getting in the way of my own effectiveness.

Stepping back myself and exploring these breakdowns only became more frustrating because of how vexing even (seemingly) simple changes proved to be when implementing. “Dr. Heal Thyself” is far easier to say than to do. While hopeful that a coach would prove helpful, my skepticism toward coaching lay just below the surface, nevertheless I endeavored to give it a shot. At exactly the time I engaged Ginger, I found myself dealing with the most significant professional challenge I have faced over the past decade.

Having Ginger as a sounding board proved to be invaluable throughout. Rather than peaking there, over the past two years we have established a relationship which is so important to me that I don’t make a major decision without consulting her on the “how” and almost always on the “what”. The issues we work on run the gamut…from personal to professional, and I have utilized Ginger’s team exercises, practices and cadences as an important part of running my own firm, in helping the companies I advise, in optimizing the boards I serve on and in refining my own YPO Forum and small groups that I lead.”

Brett Keith- Managing Partner, Rockwood Equity Partners

I worked with Ginger for a number of years for goal setting and focus for my company and personal life. She has the ability of getting to the heart of what a CEO should be focusing on and keeping that focus in the right place. The things she has pushed me to do have created some of the most significant results in my life and business. Ginger Makes it Happen!

Nick Jekogian- CEO, NWJ Companies and Signature Investment Group

In 2008 Ginger Jenks came to the rescue at our retreat and instantly connected and impressed each and every of one us. She impressed me so much that I – and at least one other member of our Forum – hired her as a personal coach.

Ginger has been working with me for 10 years. She is part coach, part strategist, part friend. She is an immensely thoughtful and perceptive person who is at expert at keeping me focused (to the extent possible) and spending my time in the right places. Most notably, whenever I had what I considered to be a really sticky business issue with a client, Ginger has always been willing and able to get on a call – weekends included – listen to my challenge and work out a solution with me. And they have all been good solutions. We often hear in business today from outside providers that they want to be our “partner”. Well, Ginger is that partner – and a great one.

Andrew Sacks- President, Agency Sacks

Ginger Jenks is a talented resource with compelling insights garnered through years of experience. She not only manages to provide thoughtful take-home value, but does so with a refreshing touch of humor and practical wisdom.

Her expert curation of the session enabled our group to renew its focus, clarify our vision, and consider strategic ideas we never would have contemplated before…