Lighthearted romantico that's quirkily refreshing in your own inimitable style, Mandee.
A few thoughts to ponder - summer camp for camp summer - giggled for smiled
- over for beneath.
Does the title work?
L15-18 perfect - a cheeky little gem on its own that oozes with charming honesty - don't touch that part ever.
You really should write more often, but then I understand how your boots are full. — Abracadabra

i can't believe i had 'beneath' on that line!
i was thinking 'over' and typed beneath. man, i'm backwards lately.

thanks for those suggestions. i'm mighty glad you did.
i kept L1-2 as is
i just like it better, for some odd reason

thanks for the encouragement sailor. i have time, but i can only write when it chokes me. lately i've been gasping for air :) — mandolyn

Oops. Forgot one thing: I feel that L6 takes away from the magick here. Read it for yourself, Mandolyn without it and I think you'll agree. The vernacular there seems to not jibe with the rest. It actually cheapens the whole piece with its seemingly juvenile interjection. I'd consider scrapping it.

Oh, and that TITLE...WOOF! JUST gorgeous! You really outdid yourself on this one, sista! xo — starr

I was just saying how absolutely beautiful and sensual this is and how IN LOVE I AM with L's 11-14! xo — starr

This makes me happy and hurt that the same time. It flows without having to finish sentences, without having to be explicit. You smelled like camp just draws in the reader, especially if they have ever been to camp or camping. — Isabelle5

thanks starr and isabelle

starr- BUT I LIKE L6! :(
i don't know why...
it's personal i guess... — mandolyn

If YOU LIKE L6, then KEEP L6! LOL! You are the author. This is YOUR baby. Your writing must ALWAYS serve as a reflection AND exTENSION of who YOU ARE and what YOU like! I really DIG L's 11 & 12 tho. They are da BOMB! :-) — starr

this is childlike and pure. speaks of sun and memory and love. — unknown

Love this. That ride was nauseating! Too many switchbacks,.
I hate this damn keyboard!! Your Cs and Vs are gone. — yield

And your e, s, a, l, nm ----DAMN! This keyboard is shit. I'm buying you a new one. — yield

you don't need the letters on each key, you just need to know the keyboard.
ding dong. — mandolyn

I love this Mandee.

It made me open my old pencil box, and take out my propelling-pencil set and bald-point pens. :) — badweather

AWESOME minus L6. It instantly, in MY opinion, reduces the entire piece. LOVE the title. I'd break L18 off on its own too. OMG! I just noticed that I had already commented on this and that DAMNED L6 is STILL THERE!!! Bring my a blowtorch!!! POOF!!! :-) — starr