Sunday, May 11, 2008

hawaii church

Well, it's no secret to most of you that read my blog that I'm on a "spiritual journey." I've been meeting with Mormon leaders, Evangelical leaders, I've been reading mormon, evangelical, and atheist books, talking with people from all different back grounds, mormon, evangelical, evangelical turned mormon, mormon turned evangelical, atheist, agnostic, agnostics that say they are atheists (that's my opinion), hindus, buddists, and a catholic. It's been an emotional journey and I think it's still far from over. Sometimes I'm happier than I've ever been and sometimes I want to give up. By "give up" I mean, become agnostic. Sorry if I offend any agnostic readers. But let's be honest, religiously it's the safest place to be. For those of you that are unfamiliar with what an agnostic believes, umm, in a nutshell they basically are happy with just not being sure about anything. Kind of a "I don't know, and you don't either" attitude. And after spending a little time on the religion roller coaster it's kind of inviting at times. But alas, I'm way too determined and stubborn for that to last.

I went to Mormon church today in Hawaii. This was the first time in probably 8 or 9 months that I went to all 3 hours of church. And it's been several months since I was in an LDS church. I'd seen at least 5 other churches on the island that I'd like to visit. And if I was here alone I probably would, but I'm with my brother Taylor. He's very active in the LDS church and I could tell that even me mentioning another church made him uncomfortable. So, I went with him.

It wasn't bad. It's mothers day so all the moms got a fresh flower lei at the start of sacrament meeting. Well, I guess moms and women old enough to me moms. Because I'm not a mom but I still got lei'd! (borderline offensive, i know)

Sacrament meeting was just kind of, meh. Alot of fun little 'mom' talks. Sunday school, not a big fan of the teacher, so mostly funny comments only heard in my head, and Relief Society was really good. Shocking because it's always been my least favorite. The lesson was about Joseph Smith and the priesthood and the power of authority in the church. I really struggle with, everything Joseph Smith...I guess that's the best way to put it. And this lesson didn't change that, but I've also been going back and forth on the authority issue in other christian churches...there really is none. Does 'Christ's Church' need it? A wise mormon I meet with says, "in the evangelical world it's 'freedom', but in the mormon world it would be considered 'chaos'." Hmm... The women who taught the lesson was adorable. I rarely like listening to women speak but she was good. And the stake patriarch taught for half of the time as well. They both had very deep and solid testimonies of Joseph Smith and the power of the priesthood. I like listening to people who know what they believe, are not afraid to share it, and have a relationship with the Savior. There were a couple things said that I don't agree with, and a couple things made me uncomfortable, but it was an ok day.

This post was really just going to be about all the pretty flowers.But oh well, you got the church recap too.And --HAPPY BIRTHDAY NeNe!!My future sis-in-law, Neally. What a babe.

Hi Andrea... it's me, Randi's friend, Kilene's sister in law. Anyway, I've occasionally read your blog over the last few monhths and I'm intrigued by your spiritual journey. I thought about you a lot this weekend because of some "questioning" thoughts I've been having. I think everyone should go on a spiritual journey before they are allowed to join a church. Anyway, best of luck to you. I congratulate you on your faith, courage, and determination... and looks like Hawaii was a blast!

My friend just pointed out your blog to me...we were discussing our recent questions regarding the LDS church...and so I was excited to read this; to see that someone else is willing to admit to their questions and search for truth in a universal way.

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why i blog...

Maybe I don't know. I guess I do it so people will know I'm here, on the planet. And then maybe in a couple years, or like 60 years, when I'm not here, someone will come across this Andrea person and wonder if the address is 'its me andrea' or 'its mean drea' Anyway, I'm just leaving a little mark. I was carefree. I was confused. I was hungry. I was mad. I was in love. I was sad. I was hurt. I was flirtatious. I was giddy. I was tired. I was determined. I was discouraged. I was sarcastic. I was daring. I was happy. I had ideas. I had hope.