This may not interest anyone but it is emotionally healing for me to write about my pain and my life right now as I work toward better health and less pain.

Monday, February 18, 2008

I had to reschedule my last appointment with the foot doctor. Tomorrow is the day we go to see him. I cannot wait to go. I can't help but be very full of anticipation that he may have something to help my poor feet.

Today is the worst day I've ever had with foot pain. Wayne said that there is a front coming through tonight and I have begun to notice that my feet are worse when there is a front coming through. I just couldn't do anything to get out of pain and feeling that way I didn't get ONE thing done in the house today. Didn't put my dishes in the dishwasher, fold the laundry or didn't even feel like getting dressed. I just ordered a pizza because it sounded good and I did make my way into the bathroom and brushed my teeth since I have to open the door:)

You know what my fear is? I get very fearful when the pain gets so bad and I finally figured it out today. I am so afraid that this will be the time when there is no relief from the pain. Every other time I have found some way, taken a pill, used the foot massager, wrapped my toes and feet/legs...and I've gotten relief from the pain. When I am in an episode of pain like today I get afraid that this is the time it will stay like this forever and I don't know if I could bear it! Oh well, enough for the worrying because by about 6:00pm after I took my foot pills and wrapped my own toes (and that's no easy feat) then all of a sudden the pain relented and was almost gone completely. Go figure:) I don't really care why it goes away...I just care that it does go away!!

2 comments:

I understand where you're coming from with your fear. But I learned this thingy (it's called an acronym, but I'm not sure how to spell it correctly) for fear...I've taught it to my youngest for moments when he is scared.

F-fantisizedE-experiencesA-appearingR-real

I tell him fear is in his mind, he controls it and what he thinks and to replace those thoughts with positive-good ones. It's helped him.OK...I'm off of my mommy soap box!Just glad you're doing well!