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Author
Topic: Eldon, this one is for you... (Read 14794 times)

I seldom, if ever, plagiarize anyone's contributions here, but in this case, I could not resist and didn't want the answer to become lost in the forest of other posts.

So, here goes, and my heartfelt thanks go out to Tom, (Skeebo), for the questions.

Eldon why not be a little more personable with the group. Your emotionless threads on information that is sometimes wrong, or worse demeaning to someones' intelligence is getting old to say the least.

I want to know about Eldon. What (are) Eldon's numbers like? What meds are you on? How long have you been infected? Do you have family? Are they supportive. Are you in a relationship? Do you really live in Lake Placid Florida (if you do I am jealous)... Do you take any meds for depression? What kind of work do you do? My point is we know nothing about you at all and you're (one of) the major poster(s) of the forums....

Make the BEST of each Day! (copy and pasted of course)

So Eldon, now it is your turn to open the closet door and let in some of that love and light you so generously spread all over the planet! Try answering ALL the questions with as much truthfulness as you can muster.

Curiously yours.

(Edited for spelling and grammar only.)

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The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals,and 362 to heterosexuals.This doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals, It's just that they need more supervision.Lynn Lavne

SFscruff

Moffie65, thanks for your posting. I have been tracking various lab values on aidsmeds.com for quite a while and thought that I might get some useful information from the forums.

I posted a 'lost my immunity to measles' query and Eldon responded in what I'm discovering is a typical fashion. If you go to the posting, (and I'm still trying to figure out how to use the various functions, so I am unable to cut and post the link to the topic, gimme a week or so!) you'll see an example of why I might soon avoid the forums. Your comments about the poster in question were accurate, astute and welcome. Where's the oversight?

I've definitely felt the same things about certain styles of posting (and the "keeping it real" part), but I think this thread is a little harsh. There may be a very good reason for some people to cut and paste the majority of their threads. Never the less, it would be nice for Eldon to provide more personal information in posts, if not provide more background through introduction for everyone.

I'm all for diversity in our postings and even his style provides just that, so let's try to keep an open mind here.

Well first I would like to apologize for my poor grammar. I am the product of one of the worst high schools in Miami. I believe I learned to fight before I learned to write..

Eldon your writings prove that you have a positive frame of mind and that is definitely a great thing. How you came to have this frame of mind is definitely something that does not need to be knocked or attacked. It does not sit well though when people you are trying to get YOUR message across to know absolutely nothing about you.

Eldon cut with the mumbo jumbo and get to the meat and potatoes. Who the hell is Eldon? I hope you can offer some insight, otherwise you will remain an enigma in this readers eyes.

I haven't been around long at all, but I think the forums are great. A place to get good advice and information from those living with HIV, a place to let off steam and find support and definitely a place to get a laugh - especially in the off topic forums. But this thread is really out of bounds in my opinion. If someone wants more information on a member why not PM the individual and encourage him/her to provide more personal information, rather than start a thread that I am afraid will eventually lead to major problems.Woods

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"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it." Nelson Mandela

Where have you been? Eldon is one of the main contributors to the forums and has been for about 6 months now. I don't think it is out of bounds at all to ask him. We all have been new here and when a new member comes in and writes a post without an introduction we always ask them to introduce themselves as a way to get to know them. If this is something that would cause Eldon duress then maybe this is not the place for him... we try to be personable here. I am curious to know something more... He supposedly lives within 10 miles of me and saw I was having difficulty finding an ASO and offered nothing. I just moved here. I know he must see a doctor..

Hey Eldon maybe we could do lunch sometime. The curiousity is killing this cat!

Thomas,I don't disagree with you wanting people to introduce themselves I think it is great way to get to know who people are and where they come from. I just wonder if there is a better way to do that, that's all.Woods

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"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it." Nelson Mandela

Tim/Moffie, I understand what you are saying. I am stuck, however, in a fascilitator sort of mindset in which 'you' encourage indirectly, i.e. by perhaps commenting how great/nice/interesting/your choice it is when and as the writers in the forums get comfortable enough to start becoming fully formed in front of us as real people, whether or not we happen to agree with them in each and every post they make. I, for one, can't stand AA. I just cannot abide the concept that 'we are powerless.' Or the, to me, slick face of a retail salesperson at this time of year. But if someone needs to be 'on' all the time, all bright and cheery, in public, we need to allow that. This may be the only way that he or she can get through his or her day. Here we can choose, and no one will know, to read over, read past, ignore threads or posts which don't speak to us. But as a public forum, I have seen that we respect the right of each person to create a thread, add a reply. Why? Because only when some of us are allowed the chance to be 'on' will they eventually get to the point of chancing being 'off,' letting the guard down, wiping the smile off, getting 'real.' With all respect for all of you, posters and self-declared 'lurkers.' Win

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Winthrop Smith has published three collections of poetry: Ghetto: From The First Five; The Weigh-In: Collected Poems; Skin Check: New York Poems. The last was published in December 2006. He has a work-in-progress underway titled Starting Positions.

I don't think he owes us an introduction. Members have varying degrees of openness in the forums. That's okay.

But I do think it should be perfectly okay to state our disagreement, (when we do disagree, that is), with his guidance and tips. I find most of them harmless, if a bit simplistic and naive. But sometimes they are off-base and we should be able to state our opinion, without feeling as though if we disagree with his niceness, then we are being mean or being jerks.

To his credit, when pushed back, he does tend to respond positively. Though I'm not always sure the message is understood, (as I don't believe English is his native tongue).

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SFscruff

Thanks for your reply. However, as a new participant in the forums, I encountered a very insensitive reply from Eldon (see the 'lost immunity to measles' posting I started) that was anything but nice. I'm very tough skinned, but still, when somebody who wants me to have the BEST of days and then thanks God that HE doesn't have to deal with my medical condition, well, nice or not? A couple of years ago, a cousin of my partner was coping with terminal pancreatic cancer and her comment to my partner was a, 'Well, at least I don't have AIDS.' Nice? NOT! Supportive? NOT! Something else? YES! Am I being too sensitive to Eldon's comment? Think about how you'd react if somebody wrote or said something like that to you!

My final thought on this, promise. As we spend more time on the forums we become more familiar with members and their posts. If I see Newt, Moffie and numerous others have posted I make sure to read their postings.. Then there are others I just skip over for any number of reasons. Perhaps if Eldon has offended someone or you don't like his views, just ignore his postWoods

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"Let us give pubicity to HV/AIDS and not hide it..." "One of the things destroying people with AIDS is the stigma we attach to it." Nelson Mandela

SFscruff

Thanks woodshere, I really do appreciate the reality check and in the future I'll ignore replies that are offensive. But consider this, if there's a stuffed stocking hanging on the mantle on Christmas morning with my name on it and when I look in it's full of coal, well, I'm going to say something to Santa. Darin

I haven't been around long at all, but I think the forums are great. A place to get good advice and information from those living with HIV, a place to let off steam and find support and definitely a place to get a laugh - especially in the off topic forums. But this thread is really out of bounds in my opinion. If someone wants more information on a member why not PM the individual and encourage him/her to provide more personal information, rather than start a thread that I am afraid will eventually lead to major problems.Woods

AMEN......

Eldon,

Please hurry up and post an Intro so this petty shit can be done with.....Geez!!!!!

(Who believes in the PM function instead of crucifying people in public)

when the wrath of anyone comes down on me, I hope it always goes like this....

Quote

In the midst of the darkness it is cold, uncomfortable, and a lot of uncertainty. When there is a "light" that shines in that darkness, to some it is warm, comforting, and re-assuring. To some others, it is not.

Help me understand this...

If someone were to furnish knowledge to you that will help you rather than hurt you, then why in the world would you want to shut them up?

It is GOOD to hear back from you as well as starting a new thread in direct response to gaining an understanding from the S.A.D. thread. As you have stated, you seldom, if ever, plagiarize anyone's contribution here on the forums. I agree with you 100%. In fact, I was quite shocked as to your response initially in the S.A.D. thread.

Thomas has indeed made a very valid request. As per his request I will honor it. In fact, I should be inside of Microsoft Word right now tryping it out for everyone's eyes to read. The window is open and I shall commence with this once I finish making a response to this thread.

I Do and have always admired the very words of your illustration to the readers here on the forum. The door shall be opened with all of its glory that is contained within it. I have no reason to mislead or to deceive anyone. I am also HIV positive as well. So grab a handkerchief and clean your glasses and you may also need to use the same one to wipe the tears away from your eyes as well.

Your curiosity shall be satisfied.

Hey SFscruff! In direct reference to your responses, I have also made a comment post to your concerns. The topic has been changed to S.A.D. To help you out in your quest to share your concerns with your thread, you can go to:

As I Do my BEST to explain to each and every member of this forum, if you DO not understand what is being communicated, then by all means ask the poster and they will clarify it with you. again, it goes back to perception. In fact, that was a "lesson" that I have "learned" a long time ago in this life.

To clarify this with you, I was simply sharing with you that I was thankful that I have never had to deal with an experience such as yours. I backed it up with a reference for you to go to. Again, it was an effort to assist you, not to offend you.

Hey Dad1216, Yes, it is your turn now...

I DO agree with you that I DO sometimes take things quite seriously. I am thankful for yourself as well as Hal to point this out to me to learn how to loosen up a little. I DO appreciate that and it has been noted as well.

Hey MSPspud,

I Do my BEST to "Keep it Real" here on thee forums. There is absolutely no other reason to DO otherwise because we are all in this very situation in our lives together. I would rather the poster to Keep it Real as this is the very thing which sets this site (a niche) aside from all of the other HIV/AIDS sites in the World.

I Do agree on the personal information as well as to provide more background through my thread "About Eldon" which is currently under construction.

I also DO agree that each and every one of us should keep an open mind here.

Also Moffie65...Oh Yes, you...

It is unfortunate that there are others in this World that we live in; "Those who are a "true" source of light, very seldom know it (because they are either afraid to look within themselves or afraid due to the impressions that have been made through different religions) or to acknowledge it (because they either do not believe or there is an inner fear inside of them).

As it is perceived, if you think the thought of it as that way, then you will perceive it that way. Everytime. Your curiosity shall be satisfied momentarily.

Hey Thomas! Yes, there is more...

Thank you as I continue to have a positive frame of mind as it is a great thing to have. Actually, The State-Of-Mind has everything to Do with it. I further agree that it does not need to be knocked or attacked either.

After my posting of my "About Eldon" thread, it will all come together.

Hey Woods, Oh Yes, I shall also say something...

I totally DO agree with you just as well. The PM and the Yahoo e-mail is working at it was programmed to DO so. as of today (11.28.2006) I have received PM's with requests. Prior to that since February of 2006, I have not. In other threads I have shared some information "About Eldon".

Now, back to you Thomas, Oh Yes...

Thank you for your valued observation that I have been a major contributor to the forums for 6+ months now. Again, your request is being processed.

As far as our geographical location to each other, while you were in Miami, I had just moved from Miami to Lake Placid. I even gave you the name and phone number of the realtor who sold us our house here. At that time I did not know that much about you, However, I still extended my helping hand out to you.

Until now, today, from one of your lasts threads, it left me with the impression that you were living in Clearwater, Florida. To be exact, that is approximately 131.24 miles North of me. I had no knowledge of any ASO's in that area. If you are in Sebring or Lake Placid now, then that is a different story.

I would love to DO lunch, we can go to Barnhills or Beef O'Gradys or we can even go to the billiards place to shoot some pool. I could sure use the little outing. Not a problem. Your curiosity shall be satisfied just as well.

Hey Woods, Yes, I am going down the list here...

You Do have a very valid opinion just as well. Perhaps there is a better way of doing that. It is quite possible (perception) that a person has not reached that level as they may be dealing with their inner anxieties. Oh Yes, these inner anxieties are Real.

Hey Win, Yes, I made it to yours..

I Do agree with you about a person being "on" all of the time. In fact, this is the very thing that each and every one of us can use in this life. We Do however have the freedom of "choice" just as well. It is our "choice" to exercise that freedom.

Hey Cliff, Yes, Cliff...

In fact, I just had made the very same statement above in Woods's section without even reading yours first. This just gives confirmation to what is being said here.

In Grinch's thread not to long ago, I did my BEST, remained positive and I stood up for each and every member of this forum. It was CLEARLY stated that in this forum, there are many different people, with different personalities, who deal with stress, who deal with anxiety, and who deal with depression.

With this kind of mixture of a wide selection of personalities you are bound to have a disagreement. That is fine. However, I urge the ones who are in disagreement to widen their perspective in order to understand what is being communicated by the other member. Remember that each and every member here communicates differently. It is very vital. Perceiving with a closed minded perspective generally prevents the message from being delivered to the reader.

Even in Moffie's "Raw Emotion" thread we all went through this. I was there to aid Moffie. I understood what he was saying because I did not perceive his message with a closed minded approach.

Moving forward, when in doubt, take the time out to clarify so that an understanding can be delivered from the message.

Back to you SFscruff...

I did make an attempt above to explain my position on my statement as well as provided you with the link. I believe that you were a little over-sensitive to the statement. Even myself in some cases can be a little to sensitive. In no way was it meant to come across that way.

Back to You Woods,

True enough there is a "ignore" button on the site. In the beginning when I first came to this site I was tempted to use it. However, something got a hold of me inside and said no. Don't look at it with a closed mind. Open your mind (perspective) and see what the message is really saying. by doing this you grow as a person.

From what I have read here since my becoming a member, a lot of the disagreements tend to develop due to the mere fact of launching the rocket without the shuttle attached to it. Better yet, looking before you leap.

In BEST response would be to reply back to the poster in a way that you can gain an understanding from the content of their message.

and now SFscruff..Yes...

I truly wish that what has been shared out of the act of pure kindness is taken into consideration.

In summary, it boils down to this. Oh Yes, this...perspective?

Acceptance of what is being posted.

Understanding of what is being posted.

Communication of what is being posted.

Thoroughly READ what is being posted.

Reading with an Open Perspective of what is being posted.

This World of AidsMeds.com will become a even brighter place for each and every one of us.

Bravo!! I have not read your introduction post because it has not been posted yet, but this last entry really does give me a different view of you. While I never thought you to be a bad person or anything your post lacked a certain personable feel that had me thinking you were some sort of robot or something... That's me though and I take ownership of that.

As far as my geographical location I did mention that I moved to Sebring in a few threads. I am sure you are aware that Sebring and Lake Placid are no where near the size of Miami. After a search for an ASO here I just came to the realization that I may have to travel to the Tampa area for one, hence questions about Clearwater area. I was told they would not see me though because I did not live in the county they served.

I welcome the idea of lunch and will get in touch with you by way of PM.

How do you like the Lake Placid area by the way? With the problems I am having with my 15 yr old and her mother I kind of wish I had bought a home there....

Eldon one thing I will commend you on is you have been a good sport about all this.. I apologize that my questions on who you are and what your about evolved into people's comments like: childish , naive and the likes.

Now in all honesty I look forward to that intro... should make a great read even without popcorn!

The sooner you get the Intro posted the better, hon. I look forward to reading it, with popcorn, blunt, and an ice cold Pepsi. It is indeed sad that it took bashing to get you to do it instead of people just sending a PM asking you to do so.

I am deeply sadden by some people's statements but I guess that is my fault, I expected more maturity from them instead of a public display of meanness. We all have the same virus, do we not? The way we choose to deal with it is the individual's choice. I do not see anything wrong with having a positive attitude about it, if that and meds, exercise or whatever works for you than do it. If you choose not to then don't, what's so hard about that?

I have never had a problem with a person speaking their mind and still doesn't. But how some people reacted to you, just sickens me, for lack of better word. But I guess because you may not have a Ph.d behind your name doesn't qualify you to speak....

(who thought the moderators should've jumped in here but I'm a newbie so I guess I don't know jack)

Yes, I clicked on the AidsMeds window to take a quick peek while I was working on the "About Eldon" thread in Microsoft Word.

I must have missed that in one of your threads about you moving to Sebring. My bad. You are right, both Sebring and Lake Placid does not compare to the size of Miami. Its like a Kendall or Coral Gables.

As far as the ASO is concerned, that is true that you have to live within the same county. Right now (as I will mention in the "About Eldon" thread), I go through the Highlands County Health Department. They have a case worker there and every supportive staff.

They cover Ryan White, Medicaid, and Hillsborough County Health Department. Right now in conjunction with Polk county we are working on launching the HIV/AIDS Support Group on Jan 1, 2007. They are still deciding on which would be the best location. In fact, we were discussing that today when I went up there to get my Lab Results.

My opinion was asked of as to where the location should be. A church was brought up and I replied that some may feel intimidated by it. In addition, I was also asked to speak on Worlds Aids Day to the High School Students in Lake Placid. Due to my young little niece, my mother thought it wasn't such a good idea for disclosure reasons.

Lunch sounds good. In fact, I was up there all day shopping with my mother in Sebring. We went to Lowes, Walmart, Walgreens, The Nursery, K-Mart, and the Lakeshore Mall. We skipped Home Depot. LOL!

Hey Thomas, I DO my BEST each and every Day to retain a positive attitude in this life that we live in today. I even told my father this evening at dinner to change his negative statement into a positive statement. He said, "You know, you really got a point there son". LOL!

In any case, I already wrote part of my journal today and then some of it here too. Let me get back to working on the "About Eldon" thread.

Hey Queen Akasha..Oh Yes, I refreshed the page as I was getting ready to post the reply above.

I Do agree that sooner I get the "About Eldon" thread posted the better. Work in progress. Someone could have sent a PM and you are right just as Woods has mentioned.

Different People = Different Perspectives

Each and every one of us here have HIV/AIDS. It is a Infused Positive Effort being made on here in order to support each other.

Yes, it is all about "choice". I agree very much so. I do not see anything hard about that either.

It is how we use the info and what works for us that we should concider with the assistance of our medical doctors. Since I've been dx I look where I can for help and where I can better my health and was told by my doc try to avoid stress and get into a fitness program it will be an advantage to take care of one self.

I have to agree with Akasha and others and further I hope you keep in mind when writing your "About Eldon" thread that you write what you feel comfortable sharing.

Last time I checked the price of admission in here is that your Living with HIV (either yourself or friend or family). There's no questionnaire form or list of questions you are required to answer beyond that. Plenty of people on here I've never heard an in-depth introduction thread from (nor should I expect one beyond the basic circumstance) and am a bit puzzled as to why you are being pressured into divulging answers to a litany of questions.

The only thing I can gather is the unique nature of your posts have made you suspect in some people's eyes. Why this couldn't have just been addressed in a PM for those curious enough to care is beyond me.

If I was singled out in a thread like this and left to roast (which I thought was a "no no," but what do I know) I'd be hard pressed to share one iota. I give you tons of credit for handling this inquisition in a mature level-headed manner.

Your privacy is your privacy and you share only what you want based on your trust and comfort level. Period.

Mikey

« Last Edit: November 29, 2006, 03:28:23 AM by StrongGuy »

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"Get your medical advice from Doctors or medical professionals who you trust and know your history."

"Beware of the fortune teller doom and gloomers who seek to bring you down and are only looking for company, purpose and validation - not your best physical/mental interests."

"You know you all are saying that this is incurable. When the real thing you should be saying is it's not curable at the present time' because as we know, the great strides we've made in medicine." - Elizabeth Edwards

Last time I checked the price of admission in here is that your Living with HIV (either yourself or friend or family). There's no questionnaire form or list of questions you are required to answer beyond that. Plenty of people on here I've never heard an in-depth introduction thread from (nor should I expect one beyondthe basic circumstance) and am a bit puzzled as to why you are being pressured into divulging answers to a litany of questions.

I have wondered the same thing, I have not seen others that have not posted an Intro being assaulted in such a manner. If a person hasn't posted an Intro after seeing how Eldon was treated, I would be hesitant to post one. Very good point indeed, StrongMan.....

I DO agree with you both wholeheartedly. I does make sense just as well. I accept your advice as a constructive supporting statement and I will keep this in mind while I am working on the "About Eldon" thread.

Thanks a million.

Make the BEST of each Day!

P.S. It is quite interesting to see that (1) one specific member is being singled out in this situation.

By The Way Moffie65 (Tim)...Oh Yes, there is more...I checked my Yahoo e-mail today and within the messages that I had received, one was from YOU. You CLEARY stated to me that YOU DO NOT wish to receive any more e-mails of Encouragement, Positive Thought, and Genuine Support from me. As per YOUR request, YOU SHALL NOT receive any more motivating, positive, concern, caring, supportive, and encouraging e-mails from me. Your very wish as to NOT receive such positive unconditional, imformative support has been granted.

Eldon, you have helped me in the last twee weeks more than what I have helped myself and made changes which I thought will never be possible and it works for me. Thru my excercises I have gained over 12 pounds I feel healthier and fitter as to what i was before and it an awesome feeling now when i go to clubs with friends and everybody that has not seen me in 6 months look twice to see the difference in me. You keep up with what you do it works for me and am grateful for you being part of my life

Eldon is not required to answer anything here. You are correct in that assumption. When I read a post I can gather some semblance of who or what your about, maybe introduction was the wrong word on my part. When someone takes the time to post often and if I am an interested reader , is it wrong after reading your posts for 6 months to say, "Hey what about you?" The only thing I know after 6 months is positive mind, eat right and you don't need meds with the proper lifestyle change. Akasha I've seen you in the forums now for all of a month if that. I know you have issues with you sisters. I know you like video games like Resident Evil. If my memory serves me correctly you wear a 7 1/2 shoe in women sneakers, but think mens shoes are more durable. I think you dislike the Steelers and I hope I am wrong in saying you are a Cowboys fan... Not information that can help me rip you off, but info that endears your post to this reader. Is it a requirement? Hell no, but is it wrong for me to ask after I've read 1000+ posts what or who you are? Especially if you are making claims that this can be done with just positive thinking and cutting back on Pepsi... Just his sharing in this thread has made him seem more real and in my eyes that was the purpose, however distorted by me or anyone else here. Eldon I look forward to meeting the man behind the message. I am going to the Highlands Health clinic tomorrow and your info here kind of takes away some of my anxiety about meeting my new support in living. We are lucky in that this part of Florida still has that small town feel and just you mentioning your conversation with the staff helps ease my tension of being around someone other than my doctor with whom I built allot of trust with and had felt so secure in her care. I appreciate your openess about yourself tonight.... So Akasha and the likes don't get too flustered, I'll pm the rest...lol!!

I want to take a moment as I break from the "About Eldon" thread's creation, and after reading Moffie65's request in my Yahoo e-mail as it has been stated above and thank you for your perception that had been percieved tonight and in these early AM hours here at the forums.

Akasha and Mike these are the questions I posted in the other thread (After Tims edit for gramatical errors):

I want to know about Eldon. What (are) Eldon's numbers like? What meds are you on? How long have you been infected? Do you have family? Are they supportive. Are you in a relationship? Do you really live in Lake Placid Florida (if you do I am jealous)... Do you take any meds for depression? What kind of work do you do? My point is we know nothing about you at all and you're (one of) the major poster(s) of the forums....

What are Eldon's numbers like? Hmmm whats wrong with that?

What meds are you on? Hmmm whats wrong with that?

Do you have family? Harmless question, but I can see where the two of you would take exception to this I guess.

Do you take meds for depression? I asked because of the thread itself...

Do you live in Lake Placid as it was stated... I do have a personal interest in that answer...

However negative you two choose to look at this is an issue of your own...

Eldon correct me if I am wrong but you have stated in one of the threads that you are hiv pos and that your parents are aware of your status and that you will be going in for your labs. So if people could take the time and read the threads then the answers to the above questions is in there.

Whatever the cards we are dealt with Donít stop playing the game Or you will be left behindWhatever obstacles comes your wayDonít stop goingMany things happens to us over years to comeWhich we have no control over,Donít stop Many negative words and thoughts Are placed on our way our roadBut donít stopHurtful things may be said to youBut donít stopHeartache and pain could be On your road over the yearsAnd still be in the years to comeBut donít stop Yes my friend donít stop Donít stop living Donít stop growing Donít stop loving life loving anotherDonít stop showing love to anotherDonít stop give life a chance Give yourself a chanceBut whatever happensDonít stop being you.

Tom my response had more to do with the nature of initiating a sole inquisition thread and the slant it draws making it out that Eldon needs to answer these questions to pass go (not the specific questions per se).

And, Tom, when you say "however negative you two choose to look at this is an issue of your own" you make it sound as though our (my) "negative" view is coming out of left field.

It's not.

Just read what was written - you (or Moffie not sure who the statement up top is attributed to) prefaced the questions by saying to Eldon his threads are "emotionless" (I don't see that) and he writes threads on "information that is sometimes wrong" (who's the judge? and as if this hasn't happened before) and "worse demeaning to someones' intelligence" and it "is getting old to say the least."

That doesn't sound like the start of an innocent good-natured inquiry which it seems you aretrying to imply, but, rather, more like a judgemental inquisition and if that comes across as us (or me) making this negative, well, I'd beg to differ.

Obviously Eldon has helped and touched people here and I HATE HATE HATE when good people get piled on when they don't deserve it. He is a prolific poster with a unique style - doesn't in any way shape or form justify singling him out on a new thread and making him feel as though he is required to answer the questions posed and have people comment on him like he is some anomaly.

It comes across as degrading and Eldon doesn't deserve that.

Just my take on it. We can agree to disagree.

Best,Mikey

« Last Edit: November 29, 2006, 05:33:24 AM by StrongGuy »

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"Get your medical advice from Doctors or medical professionals who you trust and know your history."

"Beware of the fortune teller doom and gloomers who seek to bring you down and are only looking for company, purpose and validation - not your best physical/mental interests."

"You know you all are saying that this is incurable. When the real thing you should be saying is it's not curable at the present time' because as we know, the great strides we've made in medicine." - Elizabeth Edwards

Tom my response had more to do with the nature of initiating a sole inquisition thread and the slant it draws making it out that Eldon needs to answer these questions to pass go (not the specific questions per se).

And, Tom, when you say "however negative you two choose to look at this is an issue of your own" you make it sound as though our (my) "negative" view is coming out of left field.

It's not.

Just read what was written - you (or Moffie not sure who the statement up top is attributed to) prefaced the questions by saying to Eldon his threads are "emotionless" (I don't see that) and he writes threads on "information that is sometimes wrong" (who's the judge? and as if this hasn't happened before) and "worse demeaning to someones' intelligence" and it "is getting old to say the least."

That doesn't sound like the start of an innocent good-natured inquiry which it seems you aretrying to imply, but, rather, more like a judgemental inquisition and if that comes across as us (or me) making this negative, well, I'd beg to differ.

Obviously Eldon has helped and touched people here and I HATE HATE HATE when good people get piled on when they don't deserve it. He is a prolific poster with a unique style - doesn't in any way shape or form justify singling him out on a new thread and making him feel as though he is required to answer the questions posed and have people comment on him like he is some anomaly.

It comes across as degrading and Eldon doesn't deserve that.

Just my take on it. We can agree to disagree.

Best,Mikey

Clearly something does not add up with this. The State-of-Mind comes into question.

I have been reading through this thread with a sense of, well, bewilderment and unease to be perfectly honest.

Of all those who have left replies, I most agree with what StrongGuy posted:

Quote

Last time I checked the price of admission in here is that your Living with HIV (either yourself or friend or family). There's no questionnaire form or list of questions you are required to answer beyond that. Plenty of people on here I've never heard an in-depth introduction thread from (nor should I expect one beyond the basic circumstance) and am a bit puzzled as to why you are being pressured into divulging answers to a litany of questions.

The only thing I can gather is the unique nature of your posts have made you suspect in some people's eyes. Why this couldn't have just been addressed in a PM for those curious enough to care is beyond me.

If I was singled out in a thread like this and left to roast (which I thought was a "no no," but what do I know) I'd be hard pressed to share one iota. I give you tons of credit for handling this inquisition in a mature level-headed manner.

Your privacy is your privacy and you share only what you want based on your trust and comfort level. Period.

Mikey

I made my own introduction post back on the old forum format. In general I can say I was well received here.

Since that time I have made other aspects of my life public, but only to a level I am comfortable with. I have also communicated with a handful of members via PMs and e-mail. There are some people who post here who leave me scratching my head (and with whom I cannot relate), and others whom I wonder why they are even posting here. I just read what (if anything) they have to say and move along.

If I am required to go beyond my personal boundaries to participate here, then I will withdraw and leave everyone to it.

We are all living with HIV but we are not all the same, in many ways. What's wrong with us all getting along in a respectful and supportive manner despite our differences?

You accuse me of being oversensitive and that you didn't mean to be offensive, you were just trying to be nice. I would never in any way, shape or form express joy to somebody with a disability or a medical condition that I was glad that I wasn't facing what they had to. Nice people think before they speak, write and act. Darin

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SFscruff

And it's really not necessary to send me a link with a pat on your own back to a thread that I started and have been closely monitoring. Look up the word 'subterfuge.' Several repliers have actually posted applicable, friendly, considerate and NICE messages with medical journal articles relating specifically and comprehensively to my questions that will help me answer some of my concerns. They didn't just keyword 'measles + hiv' and post a link that wasn't related to what I was inquiring about and then congratulate themselves on a job well done. Look up the word, 'insouciant.'

I have been only addressing my questions up to this point. As far as Eldon's suggestions on dealing with HIV his suggestions are most certainly wrong!! I have gathered that he feels meds are not important and positive vibes will help more. This denialist attitude is dangerous! Does this make Eldon a bad person... NO. My questions were not anything anyone else has shared here... What meds? What drugs? People like you get so flustered over a debate... why is that? If you want to jump on someone.. Pm the person that said his writings naive and childish.

I think the Eldon supporters have made this the issue it has become and while his detractors are few I was not necessarily one til now! I agree with Moffie such material can be dangerous. His advice works for those people with immune systems that are doing well. What about me , someone with a cd4 of 130? Do you think a positive attitude and not taking my meds will reverse my CD4s? I'd be in the grave by next year I bet....

I am not going to address any of this thread, other than the original post by Tim and my comments are directed at all members of these forums.

I urge you all to remember that the people behind the names and screens are as varied as the stars in the sky. We each have our own challenges, abilities, hopes, fears and dreams and we choose to share ourselves with this forum. I happen to be someone who faces severe challenges with my mental health and having dealt with it for decades I believe it allows me, no impels me to share some hard truths on posting.

When someone comes here and seriously talks about mental illness, either OCD, depression or whatever, the last thing that they need to read is that if they just THOUGHT PROPERLY, all their troubles would be over. "Think positive and you will be positive or think negative and you will be negative," sorry, those words to someone looking for help is condescension to the enth degree. It is one thing to offer thoughts of support, however you need to be mindful of your audience. Did it ever occur to some of you that those of us with mental illnesses wish we could process information realistically but we cannot, BECAUSE WE HAVE AN ILLNESS. So when you post something that insists that somehow we are at fault for our illness (where have I heard THAT before) it becomes like driving a knife into ones being.

Support is great and all I ask is that you try and remain sensitive to the particular author before just throwing advice around. It is not true that all advice is equal, nor welcome. I would hope that for those who are unable to relate to a post and address what the poster needs (not what you decide they need) then just pass that by.

Yes there are times when even well-intended posts can cut to the quick and much deeper than you might imagine.

SFscruff

FallenAngel, you say you gained 12 pounds in three weeks? WOW! If it's lean muscle mass, it truly IS a miracle! That's four pounds a week! If it's water, that might not be such a good thing, unless of course, you were severely dehydrated. Have you had a bioelectrical impedance analysis performed? I'm curious as to just what kind of weight you put on so quickly. A B.I.A. could tell us....