The Sun blasts games over child rickets scare

Critical Gamer writes: Quickly, panic stations people! Everybody strip naked and writhe around in your garden in an effort to soak up sunlight. Failing that, get to high ground in a low cut, sleeveless top and the skimpiest bikini bottoms you can find. The bastion of medical health studies has just informed us that our children are getting rickets from playing games indoors. We must lead by example!

In a sterling piece of heroic journalism, the white knight of British newspapers, The Sun, has bravely spoken out against games that deprive the nation’s children of delicious vitamin D – created when sunlight reacts with skin.