Child Development, Inc.'s preschool teachers got a lesson in caring for the children of deployed soldiers during regularly scheduled teacher training this month at All Saints Episcopal Church.

Bambi George, youth development coordinator for the U.S. Army National Guard, told the group of educators - Head Start, Early Head Start and Arkansas Better Chance teachers - that they are prepared to deal with the situation because these programs already focus on the family-parent-child connection.

A former Head Start child and Head Start center director, George began her discussion praising the work that Head Start does for low-income families and reassuring the teachers that they are well-equipped for the task.

"Children Serve Too: How School Personnel can Help Students During Deployment" addressed several topics including a definition of deployment, emotional issues and the stages of deployment.

"The soldier can be called at 8 in the morning and told he is going to be deployed. Paperwork is being done by 10 and he or she is gone by 1 in the afternoon sometimes," George said, explaining how quickly the process can happen.

Deployment, she said, is defined as military assignments in which family members may not accompany the soldier. She added that it doesn't have to be overseas to be considered deployment, and any emotional issues begin when the soldier gets the call.

The military, she said, gives three stages of deployment - pre-deployment, deployment and reunion - but she added another stage, pre-reunion. That's the stage she's is in now, George explained. George's husband has been deployed for several months. She cares for the family's four children.

"I'm at the stage where I wake up every morning at 4 and wonder if I've done everything I need to do before he gets back," she said. "The kids want to make sure their rooms are clean before Daddy gets home."

Reunions, she said, are a joyful time but are extremely stressful and can sometimes be more difficult than the deployment. A typical deployment can last from 18 months to two years and in that time, the family has learned to function without the deployed parent, and everyone has grown and changed.

"If you have a 2-year-old in Early Head Start and Dad is deployed for two years, the child is 4 years old when he returns," she said. "Those are critical years for growth and development."

Teachers and educators play an important role in supporting the children of the deployed soldier, George added. Teachers, especially preschool teachers, may be the only consistent adults in the children's lives.

George encouraged teachers to allow quality time with the parent before deployment, so a few days away from school or the child care center should be tolerated. She added that teachers should expect unusual behavior in their young charges. Toddlers may become angry with their remaining parent. Some young children may be afraid of everything. Preschoolers, George said, are the best at coping with change that occurs in families of deployed soldiers.

"They are already dealing with so many changes going on in their bodies and their minds that they have learned to cope with change," she said.

Older children may be flippant or "mouthy." Teen-agers may feel the need to volunteer heavily or become politically active. Most teen-agers don't like to talk about the situation, she said. College-age children may become politically active as well.

Preschool children may not talk about the situation, so teachers should encourage them to draw to express their feelings.

Other tips she gave include: finding a project for the entire class to do to send the deployed soldier, such as a scrapbook or a photo project; e-mailing the deployed soldier photos or drawings of the child and reporting on their progress; supporting the remaining spouse through talking and "patting them on the back;" and letting the deployed soldier know that the teachers are supporting the family and the children until their return.

"The smallest gesture of kindness is appreciated," George said.

George said that part of her job connecting families with needed resources. Military One Source has been great starting place for such needs. She said the organization gives free counseling sessions to families during any stage of deployment. Family Assistance Centers make referrals for families in need, as well.

"The hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life was to help children realize that their Dad or Mom wasn't coming home," George said. She found the book "When Someone Dies" to be helpful in the situation. Since December when she took the job, George said that she's had to help 13 children this way. She's also found other resources for these children and has made a few of her own. However, she said, there aren't many children's books on the subject.

George encouraged parents and teachers to monitor media exposure to young children because of the some of the graphic photos that have appeared with front page stories and on the broadcast news. She said for parents to reassure their children that if their father or mother has been killed, they will be notified within 24 to 48 hours "with a knock on the door and a man in uniform to tell them."

"Children don't understand that the same incident will be played over and over on the news and that they are not separate incidents," she said. "My children found out about the first fatality through a newsbreak during cartoons." She said children should be reassured that unless a uniformed soldier tells them differently, their parent is fine.

George also encouraged teachers to be on the lookout for unusual behaviors that are threatening to the children themselves or other children or family members, and for possible abuse or neglect by the remaining parent. She cited an incident in which a child refused to eat. Later, it was learned that the child's mother told him that if he didn't eat, his father could come home. George stressed that this situation is rare, but it does occur. Should these occur, she suggested contacting the appropriate authorities.