EVI SHAW: Ask for help before you burn out

SAN ANGELO, Texas - A colleague of mine reported that years ago he suddenly did not want to get out of bed to go to work.

His usual fun-loving demeanor had changed to gloom and doom. He usually got along at work with his co-workers, but he became cranky, yelled a lot and started to lose control.

He realized he needed to make some changes. He quit his job and has become a fully functioning self-employed professional.

Jane Doe is married, employed and takes care of her ailing elderly father. She does not have time to go play golf with her husband any longer or visit with friends for some girl talk. Her siblings live far away and are not interested in helping. Between her job, household chores shared with her husband and caregiving, Jane spends at least 80 hours a week working.

She eats more snack food, is in a bad mood and chronically tired. She is beginning to resent her father and is becoming at risk for elder abuse.

Both scenarios have symptoms of depression and anxiety. What they are really experiencing is burnout, which can occur in any situation in which a person becomes overwhelmed, overburdened and physically and emotionally stressed out.

Common symptoms of burnout are anxiety, depression, emotional exhaustion, feelings of ineffectiveness and negativity, headaches and stomach aches, sleep problems, unexplained aches and pains, irritability, anger and loss of feeling pleasure in life any longer.

Tips to avoid burnout or recover from it:

Practice self nurturing every day

Be proud of what you do

Set realistic limits

Discipline yourself to have the courage to say "no"

Have resources ready for referral, when asked to help

Be aware of your strengths and weaknesses

Eat well and get enough sleep

Focus on the positive

Make time to play

Let go of thinking that you have to do it all

Pet a pet

No job is worth ruining your health; you are not a failure if you swallow your pride and ask for help with caregiving. There are resources, and you do not have to do it all on your own. Visit: www.nfca.lotsahelpinghands.com, and see your psychotherapist to help with related emotional issues.