Patrick Chaplin: Guatemalan Darts Ace

Fal Priolo, the 24-year old Guatemalan darts ace, flew into London Heathrow late yesterday evening for a whirlwind tour of London darting pubs.

Fal has been causing a sensation in his native country of late. Recently he wiped the bar floor with the best sixteen players from Honduras and Belize in an open invitation held in Escuintla sponsored by the R. Illa Poof Cigarette Co. Inc.

Last week, in an unofficial Guatemalan Open, Fal never dropped a leg in his crushing 3-0 defeat of the current Quetzaltenango champ, L. de Izabel, in the best of five head-to-head winner takes all contest. For this achievement he was awarded a one week one way boat trip for two up the River Motagua to Puerto Barrios and 1,000 centavos spending money.

Trained under the watchful eye of ex-pat, female darts ace Flo Rapilo, sheet-metal worker Fal has gained sponsorship for his flight to Britain from a darts-mad uncle and believes he is ready to make his mark on several oches in the capital, details of which will be posted on this website after 12 noon today.

Trainer Flo, who played her best darts in England in the 1970s and who in 1977 won through to the open mixed pairs final at The White Hart pub in Langford, Essex, said, “I would have had the schedule published earlier but all the details are in my laptop which is in my luggage which is somewhere in amongst the other 20,000 pieces of luggage which are piling up at Terminal 5.” However, she confidently added, “Hopefully, as we only arrived at 11.30 last night, it should be somewhere near the top.”

Fal sounded confident in a press call earlier today. Speaking exclusively to anyone who would listen to him, Fal told reporters, “I am very much looking forward to licking your Phil Taylor. Bring on your ‘Crafty Cockey’ and ‘Old Stonevoice’ too. I am here to show the world that there is more to Guatemala than raising cattle and growing coffee.”