It is both essential and mindful to consider the following four things that you cannot force into your life. While we wish for certain factors of joy, sometimes we need to take a step back, relax, and realise what’s in front of us.

It can be a tendency for some people to lose their trade of thought, their personality and their pure image.

I’ve never forced someone to love me but I have experienced an occasion in my life where I tried to be like another person. I thought it would be good to be noticed more but in actual fact, it is much more satisfying to be yourself, that’s the real you.

I have been bullied from people who I thought were my friends as soon as they travelled into a different friendship group – the most popular one in the school year at the time. But after all the hurt, mostly through verbal actions, I began to realise that they couldn’t hurt me anymore. Tough luck if they didn’t like me because I realised that I didn’t like the person they had become. You don’t need people in your life like that.

I’ve been a person who too frequently creates scenarios. I’ve learnt to breathe and live for now. There are still small thoughts in the back of my mind but they are often outweighed by all of the wonderful and positive aspects of my life.

Not every day of our lives is going to be full of joy. Life can be what you make it but it can also be frustrating and throws times of sorrow our way. Never forget that in your mind, you can tell yourself that even if it isn’t going to be okay today, it will be someday. Tell yourself that you’ll get there.

Each and every person has their own ways to deal with situations and time gives us the ability to handle them differently.

You can’t force someone to love you.

Love is powerful. It can be full of ups and downs but love enables us to know how much we want to be a person’s side and vice versa. Don’t waste the love you have to give onto someone who doesn’t reciprocate it. It’s easier to fall in love with someone than to fall out of love with a person but you shouldn’t let your emotions think that you deserve to force someone to love you for simply being loved.

Eventually, you’ll realise that you it’s not true love as it is something which is natural and more heartfelt from a person.

You can’t force someone to be your friend.

No one is perfect. You shouldn’t feel the need to fit into a group when you do not feel welcomed. True friendships will include each person feeling accepted for who they are and you enjoy experiences together. Don’t force yourself into the popular group when there are much more people around you who would value your friendship. Look around at the person who talk to you and want to get to know you. Look at the friends who are there to make you laugh and ask you to do things together.

You can’t force all days of happiness.

Let’s face it, if we were happy every day, how would be grow stronger? Imagine a life without heartbreak, challenges, and sadness? We need to experience some of this in order to mature and grow. These experiences can give us independence.

For the days where true happiness does exist, you’ll begin to value it more and spread happy vibes to those around you. Knowing you’ve got past the hardest times of your life gives you more reason to smile as well as appreciating everything good that comes your way.

You can’t force situations to exist that don’t exist.

If you have a negative perspective about something, it doesn’t mean that you have to resort to the worst possible scenario that you can think of inside that head of yours. Our minds are bound to explore but you shouldn’t hurt that brain anymore by those pessimistic thoughts. When you feel like there’s a chance of hope, believe.

Things don’t happen straight away but we can give them time and believe that there can be a right place and time. As for those moments where you’re looking back and comparing, try to stop this. Someone may have been in love before you. They might have done exciting things before when they’ve said they haven’t. But you’re in the present so it’s best to focus on the journeys that you travel together. You deserve happiness.

Let’s promote that positive energy. Hold your head up high walking past that person you’ve felt uneasy around. Ignore all of the bad things that people have said about you and move on. People won’t always know your story but as much as they’ll force a false version onto other people, you know the real you and what you deserve.

This is for the women who are first to get naked, howl at the moon and jump into the sea. This is for the women who seek relentless joy; the ones who know how to laugh with their whole souls. The women who speak to strangers because they have no fear in their hearts. This is for the women who drink coffee at midnight and wine in the morning, and dare you to question it. This is for the women who throw down what they love, and don’t waste time following society’s pressures to exist behind a white picket fence. The women who create wildly, unbalanced, ferociously and in a blur at times. This — is for you.

“When Janne has a new poem written, I shut my life down to do nothing but read it, and then when I turn my life back on, everything is better.” — James Altucher