Erstwhile mayoral candidate turns focus to criminal element from Down Under

Bouncing back from her last-place finish in San Diego’s mayoral primary, District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis announced plans to prosecute members of a “eucalyptus distribution ring” at the city’s world-famous zoo.

The alleged conspirators — including long-time San Diego Zoo residents Thackery, Milo, and Cambee — are all koalas who live in the zoo’s “Outback” exhibit.

“While state law allows koalas to chew eucalyptus if they have a veterinarian’s recommendation,” Dumanis said, “virtually all of San Diego’s koalas consume eucalyptus regularly, and that ain’t right.”

For example, a recent PBS report noted that only half of U.S. adults are married, an all-time low. And of today’s Americans, only 72% have been married at some point, down from 85% in the 1960s.

But a lesser-known fact is that our country’s marriage declines have not been distributed evenly across the population. Poor people, in particular, are much less likely to get hitched than they were just a few decades ago.

TIJUANA, MEXICO — The signs at the union rally were lettered in red and green on a white background, reminiscent of the Mexican flag.

“!Con DeMaio al Norte!”
(“With Demaio to the North!”)

“!Si, se puede, jefe!”
(“Yes, we can, boss!”)

“!Te amos Carl!”
(“We love you, Carl!”)

The setting was a south-of-the-border parade on Tijuana’s famous Avenida Revolucion, where a union representing undocumented workers hoping to migrate to the United States endorsed Republican candidate Carl DeMaio for San Diego mayor.

In the spirit of bipartisanship, compromise, and reaching out to our friends and fellow citizens on the other side of the aisle, here The OB Rag offers its Voter Guide for the 2012 Republican Presidential Primary.

A couple years ago, I took a psychology 101 course at a San Diego community college. Our first lesson focused on the history of mental illness and its treatment.

The professor opened by describing a now-extinct illness called “hysteria,” which struck ladies only and featured symptoms from faintness, nervousness, and insomnia to irritability, loss of appetite for food or sex, and even “a tendency to cause trouble.”

During the Victorian Era, the professor explained, hysteria was enough of a problem to inspire heaps of medical research. And because the illness largely seemed to be stemming from the patient’s mind, hysteria became one of the first “mental” maladies to be studied rigorously by the modern medical community.

These days, the recently re-christened UT San Diego seems to be a fan of San Diego city councilman and mayoral candidate Carl Demaio. Pension-hating missives such as this, this, and this suggest the paper’s editors, at least, sympathize with DeMaio’s emphasis on public-employee retirement plans as an apocalyptic scourge facing San Diegans.

It’s not hard to imagine UT San Diego issuing a DeMaio endorsement in the months ahead, particularly if the mayor’s race comes down to DeMaio versus Bob Filner.

But a sea change underlies UT San Diego’s apparent affection for DeMaio. When the two first met in 2005, when UT San Diego was still The San Diego Union-Tribune, the newspaper’s reaction could be characterized as somewhere between skeptical and “pffft.”

CUPERTINO, CALIF. — Giving new meaning to corporate social responsibility, Apple Inc. announced it is “bringing home” more than 700,000 manufacturing jobs currently held by workers in foreign countries.

“As a leading corporate citizen of the United States,” the company said in a press release, “Apple can’t help but feel some sort of responsibility to its fellow Americans. So why not start hiring them?”

Apple plans to spread the employment across ten different U.S. cities, bringing each city an average of 70,000 new jobs, all with full benefits, by the end of 2013.

“We basically just gave our outsourcing team a different task,” Apple’s chief executive Tim Cook told The OB Rag. “Instead of scouring third-world countries to find where workers come cheapest, we surveyed America to find areas where these new jobs would make the most sense.”

Hey, local politics geeks, to celebrate this New-Hampshire-primary Tuesday, let’s morph the candidates for mayor of San Diego with the candidates for president of the United States!

Carl DeMaio seems akin to Ron Paul: a conservative outsider with a quirky personality who seems to enjoy rattling cages on both sides of the aisle.

As a candidate, CarlPaul would sport a perpetual disdain for the effectiveness of government, an admittedly eyebrow-raising characteristic for someone seeking more time as a government employee. Because government sometimes is ineffective, and sometimes worse, CarlPaul’s cranky message would carry more than a little truth and earn the support of a diverse range of disenfranchised folks with axes to grind, including many axes of the not-very-sharp variety.

On Saturday, October 2, Ocean Beach celebrated the life of John Kays, a long-time area resident known for his love for his family, his passion for surfing, and his always-friendly personality.

More than 100 of John’s friends joined members of his family on the sand near Ocean Beach’s Avalanche break to remember John. Dozens of surfers also paddled out on to the ocean, forming a circle in John’s honor.

From the event’s program:

“John spent his youth growing up in Texas and at the age of 21, in search of better surf, made the journey out to San Diego… John met his wife, Troy, in Ocean Beach in 1994… John and Troy settled in Ocean Beach and started a family, welcoming daughter Brynn in 1998 and daughter Aidan in 2002.

While this summer has seen stock markets plunge, consumer confidence crater, and hopes for a broad economic recovery evaporate, several members of Ocean Beach’s business community seem cautiously optimistic about the future.

Gary Gilmore, owner of Gilmore Family Jewelers on Newport Avenue, has noticed a slight upturn in customer sentiment in recent weeks.

After taking in a day at ComicCon as a passive observer — and then taking a day off to recuperate (and return to the work force) — I made a second trip to the San Diego Convention Center on Saturday for another round of the madness.

This time, my buddy Alan dressed as Marty McFly, the character Michael J. Fox played in Back to the Future. My wife Kirsten dressed as Jennifer, Marty’s girlfriend in the 1985 film. I donned a gray wig and white scrubs to play the role of Doc Brown, who was played by Christopher Lloyd in the movie.

ComicCon, like the Burning Man festival or a Nico’s beans-cheese-y-papas burrito, must be experienced to be fully appreciated. But at The OB Rag, we believe that vicarious enjoyment is important, too. So here are some pics from Thursday, the first day of a full weekend of ComicCon fun.

The Ocean Beach Recreation Center — like similar centers across San Diego — had been targeted for cuts to its operating hours in Mayor Jerry Sanders’ initial budget proposal for the city’s next fiscal year.

Under an updated proposal Sanders released last week, however, the city’s rec centers would maintain their current 40-hours-a-week schedule. Sanders originally had slashed rec centers hours by half, but his new plan reflects the better-than-expected performance of the local economy in recent months.

As you’ve probably heard, a small group of Christians has somehow drawn a large amount of attention to their claim that the Judgment Day foretold in the Bible is happening this Saturday — tomorrow, May 21st.

Now, if the 21st turns out to be just another Saturday across America, it wouldn’t be the first time God failed to follow through with his end of the End Times. In fact, the 100% winless record of previous predictors of the Apocalypse suggest God is not above letting the faithful make fools of themselves.

I’m not sure how the The OB Rag ended up on the invite list for the F-35 Cockpit Demonstrator event hosted by Lockheed Martin on May 17. But I had that morning free — and as Kurt Vonnegut wrote, “peculiar travel suggestions are dancing lessons from God” — so I volunteered to check it out.

The event was held at a Kearny Mesa office of Cobham Sensor Systems, a defense contractor with about 1,000 employees in San Diego. The goal was “to celebrate the past success and the strong future of the F-35 aircraft” with community leaders and media, said Eric Forstner, vice president of sales and marketing for Cobham.

Each semester, Miller guides dozens of students through his English and Labor Studies classes at San Diego City College. He has played key roles in literary projects such as the school’s International Book Fair as well as the San Diego Writers Collective. He serves as a political action vice president and does community outreach for the American Federation of Teachers Local #1931.

And as if he wasn’t busy enough already, Miller also finds the time to crank out the occasional book.

“The Irish are the blacks of Europe,” says the band manager in “The Commitments,” the 1991 movie about his quest to put together a soul act in pale, white Dublin. “Say it loud — I’m black and I’m proud.”

Noel Ignatiev, a Massachusetts College of Art history professor and controversial scholar of American race relations, uses that classic line to kick off “How the Irish Became White.” The 1995 book offers an in-depth analysis of America’s assimilation of the millions of Irish who emigrated in the 1800s.

If you haven’t checked out Google Art Project yet, you’re in for a treat. The site uses a technology similar to “street view” to enable virtual strolls through the halls and rooms of 17 famous art museums, from London’s National Gallery to Madrid’s Museo Reina Sofia to New York’s MoMA. Recently, while using Art Project […]

In an email recently reviewed by The OB Rag, nine-year-old Tucson shooting victim Christina-Taylor Green confirmed that she is in Heaven and described life on the other side of the Pearly Gates. “I’ve been learning lots of games from the Middle East, because there’s lots of Iraqi kids up here,” Green wrote. “They’re everywhere in […]

“For too long, poor people haven’t had a seat at the table in American politics,” said Newt Gingrich. “Now, thanks to their new political action committee, the voices of the poor will be heard.”

Newt Gingrich

Gingrich was speaking in his new capacity as executive director of Poor People of America, a recently formed PAC that visited San Diego to lobby local politicians. Gingrich said the group will be focused on advancing the interests of the nation’s poor and has already raised “a substantial amount of revenue.”

“It’s true that each individual poor person doesn’t have that much money to donate,” Gingrich said. “The thing is we have 47 million Americans living in poverty today, so even tiny little donations add up.”

“When people think of San Diego, they think of sunshine,” said San Diego Mayor Jerry Sanders. “I’m here to tell you we can make money off that.”

At a press conference held in his City Hall office, Sanders said the city could raise “a substantial amount of cash” through a “sale-leaseback” arrangement focused on the sun.

Under Sanders’ proposal, San Diego would receive a large, lump-sum payment for its sunshine rights. A year later, the city would begin paying a daily sunshine royalty — but only on days when the sun comes out.

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