friends with benefits

Maybe he's told you outright. Maybe he's slyly mentioned his feelings to your best friend, knowing she'd pass along the message. Or maybe it's just your woman's intuition at work, processing his lingering glances and wounded expressions when you mention your latest Tinder date. Bottom line, if your guy friend is head over heels for you, you've got a few ways to handle the situation. If all the stars align, you just might come out of this with a new relationship (or, at the very least, your friendship intact). First, evaluate your feelings. I mean, if you like him too, you've hit the jackpot. Bask in the glow of requited love and the fumbling yet wholly adorable process of confessing your feeling to each other. Then consummate them to the best of your abilities! If you're not so into him... What you do depends on how you know about his feelings. If he hasn't said anything, act as normal as possible. Keep the flirting to a minimum, so as not to mistakenly send the message that you feel the same way, and make it known that you're interested in other guys. Of course, don't go overboard, but make it clear read more

There's a friend with benefits, and then there's the friend you're dying to turn into something more. But no one wants to confess her feelings to a crush (let alone a confidante) only to have her heart crushed in return. So how do you know that it's the right call—and not a death sentence for your friendship—to tell this dude you dig him? You look for these signs, of course. 1. He not only tolerates but kind of loves your shenanigans. Is he game to embarrass himself during a totally sober karaoke night, singing a duet by your side? Or when he mentioned a group vacation to Chicago and you suggested Greece instead, was he the first to buy his ticket? Only men in lust (or even love) take your crazy ideas and make them reality. 2. You've caught him checking you out—and not just the any-man to any-woman cursory glance. Ever dragged your guy pal shopping so that you can get a man's opinion on the backless dress you want to buy, and yet, he can't seem to find his words when you step out of the dressing room? Perhaps you've hit the gym together and he's paid more read more

Have you ever had a one-night stand, booty call, [rhymes with duck] buddy, or friend with benefits? If so, according to a new study, you weren’t afraid to call any of these casual, sexual relationships exactly what they were—in fact, chances are you could label them more accurately than the man on the other side of the equation. The study, published in the Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, surveyed 800 highly educated millennial adults with sexual experience, and asked them to match the correct definition to the terms: one-night stand, booty call, [rhymes with duck] buddy, or friends with benefits. In order of those terms, women answered with 96, 92, 81, and 86 percent accuracy. (Men answered with 92, 84, 71, and 75 percent accuracy, respectively. Is it really any surprise that both sexes struggled the most with [rhymes with a duck] buddy? I mean, I didn’t even know that was still a thing.) And in case you’re worried you couldn’t define these different relationships, here’s how the study breaks them down: One-night stand: Sex between strangers or people who don’t know each other all that well. In other words, you met this dude randomly at a bar, were likely read more

Dear Emily, I got out of a long-term relationship six months ago. The breakup was pretty painful and draining, and I’m not emotionally ready to get into another serious relationship. I’m casually dating a guy that I met through mutual friends. We just started to have (amazing) sex and I feel myself getting more attached to him. He says he’s not looking for a relationship either, and it’s starting to look like a “friends with benefits” situation. I’ve never been able to have “successful” casual sex without it turning into a relationship or heartache. What’s your advice for a successful “FWB” arrangement. Do they really work? Maddy Dear Maddy, It’s admirable that you can clearly articulate where you’re at right now in your life. It’s important to take time between relationships, especially if you feel you’re not entirely recovered from the last one. Post-breakup is the best time to take inventory on yourself and think about what didn’t work in the past relationship and how you’d like to feel in your next relationship. Many people try to heal their past relationships in their current relationship. They use the new person as a Band-Aid for the pain they are feeling from read more

One of the most frequently asked questions in the world of dating has got to be “If they’re not your significant other, then what the hell are they?” Well, pre-exclusive relationships (or PXRs) don’t have to be a frustrating gray area anymore. Here’s a handy guide to the nine most common types of PXRs, all converted into abbreviations for easy texting. 1. OGBC (On-Going Booty Call) Sex and sex only. Whenever you’re both down. For as long as you can remain essentially strangers. You’ve probably never seen your OGBC before midnight. 2. FWB (Friends With Benefits) The most infamous of all PXRs, the FWB relationship is rarely ever as uncomplicated as either party pretends it is. The promise of a “no-strings-attached” deal with a person who you actually enjoy hanging out with is just too sweet, though. So, we keep acting like we’re emotionally invincible until we ruin a perfectly good friendship. 3. TLKNG (Talking) “No we’re not dating. We’re just talking.” You like each other and you both know it, but neither one of you has acted on it yet. (Having hooked up once or twice doesn’t necessarily count as “acting on it.”) 4. LVRS (Lovers) “Lovers,” is read more

The whole booty-call thing is great in theory, tricky in practice. This chart has your answer: For more tips on love, dating, and guys, pick up Glamour's June 2013 issue, or download our app right now. From Chiara Atik's new book, Modern Dating: A Field Guide. read more

Major congrats are in order to Glamour cover girl Mila Kunis, who was named Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive today! With those killer curves, eyes, and cool-girl sense of humor, it would take a total dummy not to see why. read more

He is handsome like a grown-up Seth Cohen from The O.C. wearing Joseph Gordon Levitt’s suits from Inception. He buys my drinks more than half the time we go out. Sometimes when I’m hungover I can convince him to make me coffee or ramen noodles and occasionally we watch cartoons together while he shines his shoes. He’s not my boyfriend; he’s just my really close guy friend of nearly eight years. read more

My Sunday night TV session put me in an emotional funk to start off the week, and it was mostly because of Girls, even though I think I liked the episode (Megan over at Obsessed has similarly complicated feelings). At any rate, I was so emotionally confused I watched it twice in a row to try to figure out my feelings, so let’s talk it out. read more

Ever wonder what he really thinks of your friends? He'll probably never tell you. So I asked my friends: What do you love about her friends? What do you hate about them? What bewilders you? What do you really think of her friends? read more

“I think we should be friends” is just about the worst sentence in the English language. Only in a culture as weird and neurotic as ours do we think that we should develop platonic relationships with those we’ve dated after we’ve stopped penetrating each other. I’m not a fan. And nor should this reader be: read more

Justin Timberlake may be one of the sweetest guys in Hollywood, but he is definitely not dating material! US Weekly reports that Justin's affinity for other women, among them Olivia Munn, ex-girlfriend Cameron Diaz and Mila Kunis, was what caused his split from longtime girlfriend Jessica Biel. What's more, Justin tried to make it official with Mila—and she shot him down! read more

As a member of Glamour's entertainment department, I spend a good chunk of my day following celebrity gossip, paparazzi photos, new TV, music and whatever other cool stuff is floating around the Web. Recently, I came across this trailer for a summer movie, and I've just got to share--seriously though, not. safe. for. work... read more

We’ve chatted about friends with benefits before. (You can find a few examples here, here and here.) But what do you call an ex you're still, er, hooking up with? Is he an enemy with benefits? That’s exactly what Gossip Girl's Blair Waldorf dubbed the latter situation last night. So, I'm wondering: Have you ever had trouble quitting an ex? read more

Have you ever tried to postpone the physical aspects of a relationship? Has holding your guy’s hand, kissing him or having sex with him ever been off limits for a certain period of time? Last night’s Gossip Girl has me wondering: What’s the longest you’ve waited to hook up with a boyfriend? read more

On Friday night, I was having what my mother would call “a late night” out on the town when I noticed some bad booty call behavior that I have to report back on. Basically, a guy my friend Alexis used to date, and still hooks up with, ignored her all night, chatted up other girls, left without her, and then texted her to come over once he was home. And she went! read more

Dear Single John, I've been single for my whole life. Now, at 2,3 I started a friends-with-benefits (FWB) situation, partly because I've been a virgin for too long, partly because I've been a bit lonely. Even though he is in no way right for me, or even considerably nice to me, I continue the affair. I know that he sleeps with other people, but I thought I didn't really mind. So yesterday, by accident, I saw him with a girl, and I got bad stomachache. So I guess that means I'm falling for him, even though I don't really like him. As I am literally the girl no one ever shows interest in, I'm still debating not doing anything and continuing the affair. I know at 23 people are married and have children and what have you, and I am way behind on the normal dating routine...should I just abort contact, or should I tell him how I feel? read more