I think Selkie’s been sympathetic to Amanda for some time now. Remember the whole thing with the secret Amanda’s-friend-whose-name-i-forgot wasn’t supposed to tell? Selkie is annoyed at the idea of having Amanda over because she’s used to having Amanda be an annoying disruptive jerk, but as long as Amanda doesn’t actually behave like that, I think she can count on having Selkie in her corner.

There’s how sisters are “supposed” to behave. And then there’s reality. Reality tends to have a lot of dysfunctioning people in it. Good for you if you lucked out in the family lottery, but you might remember not everyone does. S’not like people get a choice in the matter.

So why does “reality” have to mirror YOUR experiences and not other peoples? You may have had a rough go of it with your family, and thats really unfortunate, but people who had good relationships in their families shouldn’t be derided for not living in “reality” or made to feel shame for not suffering enough. Some families are good, some are bad, many are a mix of both.

And frankly yes, I agree with the above poster, if someone thinks that endlessly tormenting is how siblings are SUPPOSED to behave then it would be bad to be their sibling, because thats likely what they would do.

Not about reality mirroring my experiences with siblings. This is about the comic mirroring the reality that not all siblings get along. Which is at least as common as siblings who do get along. As Ren started the snark via a personal attack on the poster prior, I see no reason not to point out the obvious.

So, let’s disect this conversation thus far. According to Rens, Djkblue is a bad person to have as a sib, simply because she can see the ways Amanda and Selkie already act like sibs. Rens has no idea what kind of sib Djkblue actually is, Rens likely doesn’t know Djkblue aside from comments on this forum.

Djkblue may be a very supportive sib who had to deal with a bully who was a sib. Djkblue may be a parent/babysitter/teacher/therapist who has to deal with the reality of sibling bullying. Djkblue may be a perfectly wonderful sib…now, after dealing with her own issues. Rens doesn’t know. Yet Rens feels perfectly justified in making a very personal comment on Djkblue’s sibling qualifications.

While it is perfectly okay for Rens to have an opinion on Amanda’s fitness as a sibling, it is not okay for Rens to attack Djkblue on a personal level just because Rens disagrees with it. Fact is, we don’t get to pick our bio siblings or legally adopted ones, our parents do it via luck of the draw. Which I’m perfectly capable of commenting on since I have 5 bio sibs and 3 legally adopted ones, none of which I picked. Some I get along with, some exhibited bullying behavior. All of them remain my sibs regardless of personality flaws, some of them I just don’t hang out with as much because of those flaws.

Enter David K, who seems to think Rens is okay with wording his/her opinion as a personal attack because he agrees with her. Maybe he isn’t, but he is more than willing to jump on me for pointing out that Rens reality is not reality for everyone and accuses me of doing what Rens actually did do which is deride someone because their family reality did not match Rens’ and try to shame them as being a bad sibling.

Most interesting of all, nobody claimed siblings were “supposed” to exhibit bullying behavior. Unfortunate truth is some do.

Nobody is being shamed because they were lucky enough to have supportive family. However, I am more than willing to point out how both of you are trying to shame those who didn’t under false pretenses using a straw man argument.

Amanda hasn’t just been “an annoying disruptive jerk”. She’s been bullying and tormenting Selkie possibly for as long as the latter has been *at* the orphanage — remember back when she was having a nightmare?

From the look on Andi’s face, hearing that reaction coming from Selkie of all people … I think it’s finally hit home to Andi exactly how badly she screwed up. Intellectually, she already knew but I think it’s finally sunk in emotionally as well.

I really like Selkie’s reaction to this. I can see her becoming very sympathetic and understanding towards Amanda, given all the tragic information she’s found out about her. Once she finds out not only was Amanda ‘returned’ but also abused, I think it’s gonna click in her brain why Amanda is so angry and has severe trust issues.

I think she’ll understand (or Todd will explain) that Amanda will probably continue to be mean to her for a while even if Selkie tries to become her friend. Amanda will (she already somewhat has) start to be less malicious in her insults and eventually open up to Selkie. She’s probably still be sarcastic and smart mouthed, but it’ll be more endearing than angry at the world. They’ll make a fabulous team. Selkie is just going to have the patience of a saint for a while and be very understanding while the adults (and Selkie too for that matter) work with Amanda to deal with her issues.

I’m so excited to see Amanda’s gradual change.

Also I feel bad for Andi, she’s truly sorry and acknowledges she was so very wrong. And before people jump at her throat for not saying it was her who said it, this is not her trying to avoid blame. She’s trying to avoid further hurting Amanda. Now is NOT the time to tell Amanda what happened. I can only hope Todd and his family can learn to forgive her and accept then as part of their lives. Not as Todd’s girlfriend, but the mother of their granddaughter. I hope their inevitable vent towards Andi allows them all to move on and start over.

Yeah, I’m. Really scared of what might happen if Amanda works out that the mom who gloriously rescued her from the orphanage is also the person to blame for no-one else doing it before. It’s just. Not good. Not good for this family and especially personally Amanda at all.

Come to think of it, they probably need to invent a fake story about how some other person-that-Amanda-is-never-going-to-meet-but-they-are-a-huge-jerk is to blame for everyone thinking that Amanda was dead, and how Andi eventually ~managed to heroically see through those lies or whatever. And add some plausible explanation for why Andi gets so twitchy and guilty looking whenever the subject comes up (they were her friend and she trusted theme which is why they got the opportunity to do that?)

I’m normally not a fan of elaborate superfluous lying schemes, but damn. It’s really crucial here that Amanda doesn’t learn the truth before she learns to be secure with this family, and she and Selkie are smart kids. If they aren’t given a plausible explanation, they are going to reach for the closest one any time now…

Oh I disagree. More lies on top of a lie will only harm Amanda. Omission of the entire truth is the best thing can do in the current situation. Eventually they should tell him, but… now is not the time. If they told her now, a blow so severe would make it so she never trusts anyone ever again. She didn’t even believe Andi was really her mom at first, if they told her Andi didn’t want her so her and her mother came up with a lie that she died? She won’t be ok.

Yes, this. Kids are more resilient than people like to think. It’s adults who’ve been kicked around by life who aren’t. Truth has to come out because both Amanda and Selkie are obviously too intelligent not to unravel it. There are only so many people who could tell a lie of that magnitude and be believed. Which means Andi. And what happens when Amanda figures it out before Andi confesses? There goes all the trust she was trying to build and that’s going to be far harder to build then than if she comes clean now.

Now, for the sake of argument let’s assume the lie is told, they blame some random person and everyone is roped in to covering for that lie.

How do you explain the obvious dislike Todd’s family has for Andi? She did something mean to them? What? Oh, they don’t really dislike Andi? When all their body language says otherwise? How’s Amanda supposed to harmonize the cognitive dissonance that creates? By ignoring her own accurate intuition? Because that’s not going to have longterm consequences down the road…or lead to her actively hating them for their unreasonable (to her) issues with the mother she cares about.

In order for a lie to work, the adults around both Selkie and Amanda are going to have to actively shut down the truth and NEVER TALK ABOUT IT. How fair is that to them? How are they supposed to resolve their own issues when you are effectively taking away their support? Oh, don’t do it in front of the girls? That’s not going to fly, humans are absentminded by nature and tend to not realize exactly how far sound travels, esp through walls. Or a friend they relied on for support says something, not realizing the kid(s) don’t know. A secret is only secret when only one person knows. That’s already impossible here.

Then there’s this huge third problem – liars eventually get caught out and their victims discover the truth. Every person who upheld a lie of this size then becomes suspect and the victim has no one to turn to for support – everyone who supposedly cared about them lied and can’t be trusted. Do you understand how isolating that is when you can’t trust a single adult in your life? Every interaction with every person after then boils down to the base “are they actually telling the truth this time, or is this yet another lie?”

Sorry, there is no good reason to lie to kids. If you can’t tell the truth, tell them the truth belongs to someone else and it isn’t your story to tell. Tell them you can’t talk about it yet because it upsets you too much. Tell them any other truth but do not tell them a lie just to make them stop asking questions you don’t want to answer.

I actually recognize Andi’s behavior as what it is. She’s criticizing herself and admitting her mistakes. I’ve done it this way as well and this is starting to become the moment I was waiting for. The damage she’s done finally fully dawning on her and she starts healing herself and earning respect. I am mad at her still yes, but I was hoping for some character development soon for her. Maybe some day I’ll stop seeing her as a selfish impediment.

Ah yes, because ~making sure the evil villain Andi pays for her crimes is so much more important than Amanda’s well-being! So what if her first chance at feeling secure and at home in her entire life is going to be blown to all hell and her trust issues are going to be exacerbated x1000? The actual living girl right now is so much less important than making sure The Crime Commited Against Her By A Scared Teen Mom Who Meant The Best But Was Direly Wrong is avenged!

Yes because she couldn’t explain how she messed up in any manner because she’s SUPER responsible for this. Needs to make it up to a family she didn’t just INSULT BUT TRAUMATIZED TO HECK IN BACK ALONG WITH THE KID SHE SAID WAS DECEASED BUT DIDN’T NEED TO.

I mean it isn’t like she’s being told by her Dad that he didn’t know and does love her. Or that her Grandparents love her too. And what the heck is therapy? B.s.! Amanda don’t need no stinking therapy!

Dave, you kicked me right in the feels with that Last frame. It is hard for me to take, but, … but if she drops the plate of pork chops, I will wax wroth, and you will feel the venom. Don’t make her drop the pork chops! For the love of God, Montressor! Yes, Fortunado, ….

I kind of really hope that Mari notices that Andi is dying inside right now. I hope she notices and it maybe helps her keep the venom in check a bit. Andi knows she screwed up without snide comments from grandma and she needs to be able to put less energy into her own guilt and more into doing what’s right for Amanda. I’m not saying Mari shouldn’t be pissed, but she could use a little of her husband’s patience just to keep Andi from freaking and making more mistakes.

Hopefully they can find the power to start forgiving her, at some point. And not even “forgiving” yet, but “start” to. Begin the process. It’s gona take a LOOOONG time, but at least Andi understands what she did and isn’t trying to make excuses. Once she hit that point, making her feel more horrible for it won’t solve anything. She’s already carrying a ton of rocks on her back. Adding another ton will only crush her, and although she did something horrible, I don’t honestly feel like she deserves to be crushed.

The 27 year old trying to make it all right shouldn’t be judged entirely on the 17 year old that screwed it up in the first place.

Kept in consideration, sure. But as we see more of her it’s becoming clear that she knows how badly she screwed this up and how hard she’s trying to make it right again. Her early delusions of instantly going back to the way it was have been shattered, and I really do think that hearing Selkie voice her opinion has been the final piece she needed for it to truly sink in – emotionally – how badly she screwed up everyone’s life here.

Probably not intentional but Andi just comes off as incredibly “Oh woes, pity me” when she does this, like we are actually supposed to be sorry for HER. Like… she’s being over dramatic. Should just fess up and explain herself, what she did was horrible but it’s also done.

She’ll probable will, with some gentle nudging and not a nose shove like some bad dog that pooped on the carpet but give her some time to get her head on straight and when She’s not so afraid . She’s been coming to terms with her lying mistake and it just went boom for her . I don’t blame her for coming off all woe is me and please pity me . She probable didn’t want to come off as that pitiful in front of her ex boyfriend and his parents. Flight just seem to come natural in Andi’s reaction.

Shame. When the matter of Todd not knowing Amanda was his “natural” daughter brushed away, there’s the still-horrid conclusion that, in an open contest between Amanda and Selkie, Todd chose Selkie. That’s gonna do wonders for Amanda, who’s already seriously damaged…

They do realise that if they continue being this hostile towards Andi there’s the probability that she could take Amanda with her and never visit again right? its within her full parental rights to not bring her to see them anymore.

So one comment and a few dirty looks is horrible? If Andi was to take her away and never see them again good. She would prove the hate train right and we wouldn’t need to see her again. This is light treatment. They’ve been positively civil compared to what she could get. Besides, no one is treating her in the least bit horrible in this one. They’re talking to Amanda.

I just want to note that all brutalization has been her doing it to herself and everyone that dislikes her here on the comment section. Todd has expressed anger, and so has Mari. But they are allowed.

At this point, if she loses her mind and does take her away, then she is passing the moral event horizon. Besides, they should be allowed to express themselves. The more violent and verbally aggressive should not be done in front of Selkie and Amanda, and unlike a certain troll, I don’t think she warrants actual violence. But Todd & Co have done nothing even close to mental brutalizing.

If she walks because of huwt feewings then I’m done with her completely. I’ll never give her any credit or even an inkling of respect like I have with her right with those last frames. There’s a difference between stress from a heel realization and having a mental breakdown because you’re just a fragile little snowflake.

I think that’s not likely to happen. First, this evening isn’t over yet. It has barely begun. This is clearly a pivotal point in Dave’s plotline. Many of things will have changed, and everyone here will have learned quite a bit, by the time it’s done.

Second… yes, Andi is dying inside. This has to count as a horrible no good very bad day for her. But she’s taking responsibility – the adults in the room do all know what ‘someone’ she’s talking about.

True, it’s in her parental rights, unless Todd decides to take action and try for a paternity test. Then sue for his own parental rights. Seriously, taking Amanda away will only make things worse for Andi, no matter how mean she thinks everyone is being to her. And that’s not including Amanda, who’s bound to wonder why she can’t see her dad and grandparents anymore.