A Message and a Means

by Courtney on November 5, 2012

Today, I’m sharing my thoughts on appearing in a short documentary about Attachment Parenting, which aired on a Pittsburgh-area public television station. You can watch it here if you missed it or if you’re out of the station’s range. Enjoy!

“I’ve been asked to do this TV interview about Attachment Parenting. Should I do it?” I asked my husband.

As blog editor, interviews aren’t something I normally do. I was unsure. My concern wasn’t that I’m a nervous person in the sense that I fear being judged. It was more that my thoughts and my words are often out of sync. When I’m writing, I cut, I paste, I make liberal use of the delete key. But when I’m speaking, I need time to process what I want to say, especially when I’m being careful about it. So I expected a lot of uhmmmmmms and errrrrrrs and where was I going with this, among some stuttering….

My husband has known me long enough to know what my concerns were. And he knew there would be editing, so he shifted my focus to where it needed to be.

“It depends,” he said. “Is there anything you think the world should know about Attachment Parenting?”

This conversation happened just weeks after the media storm resulting from the TIME cover showing Jamie Lynne Grumet breastfeeding her 3-year-old. So yes, I felt that there was plenty of misinformation that needed to be straightened out about Attachment Parenting.

“You’ve been given an opportunity here. Either you can say what you think the world needs to hear about Attachment Parenting, or someone else can say what they want to say,” he said.

He knows his way around my head. I had made up my mind.

I wanted to tell the world that anyone can parent this way, regardless of lifestyle. I wanted to say that it’s not a competition. That we don’t think we’re doing things the one correct way, or the only way, or better than anyone else. I wanted to show that it’s so much more that what onlookers see – it’s more than a sling, more than where we sleep.

I had a message, and I had to step outside of my comfort zone to put it out there. I had to do it.

The day came. When the producer, Alicia, arrived, we started talking about our three-year-olds, mom-to-mom. I could tell that I was in good hands. I decided her cameraman was a nice guy too, even though he was holding a big scary camera with a movie screen-sized lens. With teeth. Okay, I’m exaggerating, but the camera intimidated me a bit.

He turned the monster camera on, and Alicia and I continued chatting. That’s it, we just talked.

The uhmmmms and errrrrs I was all worried about? I did plenty of that. Had I known how magical editing would be, I wouldn’t have given it much thought at all.

In the end, a few tripped words here and a pause or two there didn’t really matter.

Courtney Sperlazza, MPH, has worked in health research and is currently a write-at-home mom to two of the most beautiful and charming kids on the planet. Her most recent project is baby number 3, due early October. If you liked what you read, you can find her blogging about parenting, homeschooling, winemaking and more at Project Courtney.