Hardly Working / Troughing

Script

Hardly Working: Troughing

By Patrick Cassels

INT. SOMEWHERE IN THE OFFICE NEAR A TABLE (DAY)
Jeff and Amir are eating lunch. Sandwiches. BLT's with
chicken and avocados. On whole wheat, toasted. MMM. So good.
AMIR
I've had a cold-- like a bad
headcold, coughing, sneezing, sore
throat, for the past... 40, 50
weeks.
JEFF
Are you bragging?
Streeter sits down with a salad and a bowl of chili.
STREETER
Hey duders.
JEFF/AMIR
Hey duder.
STREETER
You guys mind if I trough this?
JEFF
Nope.
AMIR
Trough?
Streeter dumps the salad and chili into a mini trough
(breadloaf pan.) and starts shoveling the food into his
mouth with his hands, snorting.
AMIR
Oh my god.
STREETER
What? Did we kill Osama?
AMIR
Yeah, a while ago, but I'm talking
about how you're eating.
STREETER
You said it was okay.
AMIR
Jeff said it was okay. I just said
"Trough?"
STREETER
(to Jeff)
You gonna finish that?
JEFF
No.
STREETER
Toss it in the trough.
Jeff tosses his sandwich in there.
STREETER
Jesus, like, break it up when you
toss it in. Piece by piece. Here.
Streeter gets Jeff's hands down and dirty, separating the
sandwich and pressing it down into the trough.
STREETER
See that?
JEFF
Yeah, sorry.
Back to troughing for Streeter.
AMIR
Why?
JEFF
Back off, you put ketchup on your
eggs.
AMIR
PEOPLE DO THAT. And I wasn't even
talking to you.
Pat comes by with a plate of half finished lasagna and
brown rice. He stands next to Streeter, offering him.
PAT
Hey duder. Interested?
Streeter examines.
PAT
Lasagna. Brown rice.
STREETER
Ya, ya, drop it.
Pat scrapes the food into Streeter's trough. He breaks it up
with his hands like a pro. Streeter resumes troughing his
lunch.
AMIR
God, you sound disgusting.
Pat starts walking away, Streeter without looking up grabs
the back of Pats knee and grunts.
STREETER
I SAID DROP IT.
PAT
I did!
Streeter lets go. Pat limps away.
AMIR
Is this like a time-saving thing?
STREETER
You tell me!
Streeter shows Amir the trough. It's still full.
AMIR
There's still a LOT a LOT of food
in there.
STREETER
Pat threw in some Lasagna. My salad
and my chili is pretty much gone.
AMIR
Lotta chili left, man.
Sarah comes by and throws in a Kraft single cheese slice.
STREETER
That's Lasagna. No way, that's
lasagna. (to Sarah) Thanks.
JEFF
It's lasagna, Amir. Trust me.
AMIR
You're not looking! (to Streeter)
Down there. That's lasagna?
STREETER
That's chili that's like, a little
bit of chili. (moving food around)
AMIR
It's not.
Murph pours in the rest of his blue powerade.
STREETER
(to murph)
Thanks.
(back to Amir)
There's a little bit of tuna
casserole stuck to the side from
last week--
AMIR
Gross.
STREETER
How often do you clean your trough.
AMIR
Never. I don't use a--
STREETER
You're the gross one then. Fact is,
I'm about to switch to my work
trough while you're still nursing
that small ass sandwich. That's
efficiency.
AMIR
Work trough?
Streeter scoops the remains into a paper cup, the kind they
serve frozen yogurt in, and puts a rubber band around it and
his head so it sticks to his face like a surgical mask.
STREETER
See. Work trough.
AMIR
Where do you even get that?
STREETER
Standard to-go container. Won ton
soup comes in something like this.
Fro-yo, like 16 handles on 2nd
ave--
He then walks towards his computer with his head tilted
back, eating, dripping chili, snorting. He starts working.
Snorting. Dripping.
AMIR
(eating his sandwich)
Right right. This is okay?
Everybody is okay with this?
Shot of Streeter eating, snorting, dripping. Amir is yelling
to all who will listen.
AMIR
(still eating)
Yeah? Cool then! I'm the crazy one
I guess!
PAT
Stop talking with your mouth full.
AMIR
Sorry.
THE END
POST-HUH
The entire office is silently working in a super wide shot.
We can see, and more importantly hear, Streeter just eating
away with his work trough.