January 07, 2003

Barney Is Cool Perhaps I

Barney Is Cool

Perhaps I have judged Barney too quickly. Based on the birth of my daughter and the soon to be arrival of baby #2 (any day now) I made the conscious decision to steer my kids away from the purple dinasour. Not because I think he teaches bad things, or that rumor has it he is gay, but simply because he is irritating as shit. I can't stand to hear those stupid songs they sing or watch those poor children dance around smiling as though they have rods shoved up their asses. I hate it, and so far (I don't mean this to sound as though I am bragging), I have managed to not watch one Barney episode on tv. However, one woman did give my daughter a Barney tape to watch in the car on our long trips (and looked at me and mouthed "I'm sorry" as she handed the Bug the video). Although I do most of the driving and haven't actually watched the tape, I have had to listen to each horrific song about going to the damn zoo. Now, however, my attitude may be changing as I ran across this story on an AOL news site:

Kids Find Porn In Barney Book
by The Associated Press

BERGENFIELD, N.J. (Dec. 27) - Two youngsters who wanted to sing along with Barney the Dinosaur opened a music book and discovered a photograph of a man and woman in a naked embrace.

The photo, which ran under the words ''Wilder Sex,'' was in a ''Sing-Along Songs Barney'' book a couple bought for their 4- and 7-year-old children.

Rosemarie Arnold, an attorney for the unidentified family, said the photo came from a review of pornographic movies published in a German-language magazine.

The children found the photo when a plastic panel fell off the book, Arnold said. Along with the English-language ''Wilder Sex,'' she said the page included other adult movie reviews, written in German, that were rated with pairs of lips instead of the more common stars.

Maybe the new theme song for the show should be:

I love you,
You love me,
Let's get one more so we'll have three.
With a great big spank,
And a grind from me to you,
Barney enjoys good porn too!!!

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