February 1st, 2012

I’ve been having trouble with Firefox. The problem has to do with Gmail. Without warning, Firefox will hang up and become virtually unresponsive. I get an error message saying that there is an Unresponsive Script on the page. It has to do with Flash running on Gmail. (Why do they do this?)

I tried to use a plug-in called Yes Script that is supposed to block scripts from running on websites. But this doesn’t work on Gmail. So I have chucked Firefox altogether.

Google Chrome is even worse on my old IBM ThinkPad. The program freezes up and just doesn’t work at all, without warning. The problem is the computer, which dates back to about 2006 and is low on memory.

After looking around the web–quite a bit, to my surprise–I found a browser called K-Meleon. It uses the same Mozilla code that Firefox uses. But it consumes far fewer resources. It runs great on this old machine. It’s far from perfect. On some sites, like Talking Heads Memo, the layout is totally scrambled. And other sites don’t recognize this browser and throw up warning messages when you connect. But 90 percent of the time, it’s lightning fast. It seems to be perfect for old computers that are low on RAM. Why haven’t I heard about K-Meleon before? Has anyone else used it?

I particularly like the search button next to the address bar. Type a search keyword or phrase in the address box, press the Search button, and you search Google instantly, no matter what site you’re on.

I was born in a log cabin in Des Plaines, Ill. I split rails for the local railroads and built landing strips for the jet airplanes that scream overhead every five minutes. I convulsively peer into the sky to this day, looking for interference from the heavens.

I wrote a column called "So It Goes" for my local paper for $5 a week. I was able to buy a house in the city of Chicago with this fortune, where I have been ever since.

Suddenly, in middle age, my comfortable existence was shattered by fatherhood, which rendered all pets and mechanical instruments irrelevant.

Have been obsessed with being a doting father and struggling to pay book bills and musical lesson fees ever since. Wrote a book on online dating years before I tried it. Have retired from this after repeated failures followed -- miraculously -- by success.

New profession: chauffeur to two teenage girls who talk to me occasionally.