Break-up via text: A trend among youngsters

In 2014, when an American site claimed that a growing number of youngsters, between the age group of 18-30 years ended their relationships over a text, it seemed unbelievable. But now, psychiatrists in Mumbai discuss about how a growing number of youngsters are breaking up with a text in order to ‘avoid’ the awkwardness

Heartbreaks are sad, however, they are worse when it is done over a text message or using any form of social media. In last 2014, an American website revealed through its survey that, of 2,712 respondents, it revealed that 56% ended their relationship via text, email or some form of social media.

But now, psychiatrists in Mumbai discuss about how a growing number of youngsters are breaking up with a text, in order to avoid the awkwardness.

“It’s a worrisome trend among youngsters. I would say between 18 to 25 years of age. There are two facets to this,” said Dr Parul Tank, senior Psychiatrist at Nirmai healthcare, Bandra.

“One important factor is the age. This is the age when heartbreaks and such things are not taught to be handled. I get so many people for therapy post break-ups. Because they are not equipped to handle break-ups, they prefer messaging and getting over it. But, according to me it’s the worst way to do it. Two, when they are not equipped, they take to such ‘avoidance’ mechanism. This spoils a lot of relationships and makes heart breaks tougher,” said Dr Tank.

It is no secret that a lot of such heart breaks leads to bad memories. Doctors say it’s a big no-no.

“Most people tend to be scared to face repercussions of what is going to happen when they decide to break-up. To avoid this confrontation and things blowing up people tend to take the easy way out. This is prevalent amongst a lot of age groups right from junior college to mid 30’s,” said Havovi Hyderabadwalla, a clinical as well as forensic psychologist, who is also co-founder of Mind Mandala.

People tend to not want to deal with the drama, explains Hyderabadwalla. “This trend maybe worrisome as it affects communication amongst people. It tends to damage most relationships. Sometimes people may misunderstand the tone of a message or what the message actually means.”

She added, “Digitalisation has brought in a lot of pros but a lot of cons as well. People have lost the ability to make simple eye contact across a table or have a conversation. Earlier you would see couples talking across the table lost in conversation – be it good or bad. Now you see two people sitting across and looking into their phones claiming to live happy lives.”