Archive for the ‘Authenticity’ category

TIME….is a short 4 letter word & yet there are so many meanings to this little word…meanings that are funny to meanings that are very deep as well.
This word…TIME has come up a lot for me in the past few weeks…past few months…past few years. The meaning of TIME has changed & evolved over….time 🙂

So….Here’s my 2 cents on Time.

Time as a measurement of lack: I don’t ever have enough Time to get ________ done.

Time as an acknowledgement of passing events: I remember 20 years ago when ________ happened.

Time as a measurement of accomplishments: In just 3 years, I have achieved my list of 20 goals.

Time as a reminder of the good times: Remember going to _________ and having so much fun.

Time as a reminder of the bad times: I remember __________ 😦

Time as marker of life events: I have 2 children & 1 grandchild now 😀

Time as a way to mark future events: In 1 year, I want to travel to _________

Time as a man made way to control people: Arrrr….Monday, time to go to work again.

Time as a way to keep many people busy: I don’t ever have enough Time to get all these things done in a day

Time as a way to keep Truth Hidden from many people: Earth is much older than what science books tell us Earth is.

The Biggest Hidden Truth about Time….is that there Is No Time….Now is just NOW & will always be. “Time” has been falsely put here to control & enslave us & keep us going in circles…so we are too tires & too busy to search for the Truth. Some of us….We woke up, shook off the long slumber & have Remembered the Truth 😉

Here’s a great song that speaks to Time & the different meanings of Time.

As a single woman…I have managed my life pretty darn well on my own. Have realized my strength and courage to be able to stand on my own & make my way through this crazy world. I have learned that I am capable of being my own best friend, my own best company and to Love me for Me. I am comfortable being alone & to be in silence too. (I just realized as I’m typing out this blog post…I’ve got no music, TV, radio or noise of any kind around me; and I am alright with the silence.)

Coming to the conclusion that I have mastered being on my own and have gotten over some traps that I tripped over in the past, like: “needing a man to complete me or fix me or make me happy or that I need to fix a man to be needed.”
I am content in my Self and now no longer need to prove to myself or anyone else that I need to be “do it all on my own .” I am now open to the idea in finding a loving partner who will be my Equal, my Partner & my Complement to me and who will add to my life.

I have been going through some very personal and trying times this past month. It occurred to me today….when was the last time I was just held in the arms of a man and felt safe enough to be vulnerable and just cry? I have to say…I am stumped to come up with a specific memory of this…just to be held & allowed to cry, no other need or want but to be held & be allowed to openly cry & not to be silenced or shhhhed or be told “don’t cry.” I cannot recall a time when I was allowed to openly cry with a man like I’ve described. I am shocked and a little saddened that it has taken me this long in my life to realize that this is such a huge want that I do have.

I am a huge advocate of equality and like to stay away from stereo typical rolls….but there seems to be some Huge Primordial need to be held by the opposite sex and be allowed to be vulnerable…to be allowed to feel so safe that you can fall to pieces for that moment in time & that you will be supported & cared for….that they have your back and will hold you for as long as it takes for the tears to subside.

So….let me ask you.
When was the last time you were held lovingly & allowed to just cry?

I have taken a bit of a hiatus and realized that it has been more than 2 months since I last wrote a blog post…Too long for a wordy person such as myself. Writing things down for me have become my therapy…it has become a Healing Tool for me and gets out what is floating around in my head. It gets out the issues, fears, chatter and noise that can become so over whelming at times if it all just stays in my head. So, with this inspiration and a fresh word document open, I sat down to write out a new blog post….then cursor just blinked & blinked on the screen….no words were coming to me. The very topic I had intended on writing about seemed too big a mountain to climb just now… too much in my mind right now to settle into an inspirational post. So, I have gleaned this most appropriate blog post that fits what I most need to hear, see & do for myself at this time. This blog post is from just over 2 years ago, I wrote in on March 31, 2010. May this blog post be just as relevant to you as well. Enjoy.

Spring Cleaning For The Soul

We have just finished welcoming in the official start of Spring & celebrated the Spring Equinox here in the northern hemisphere. This is the season of new beginnings & rebirth. This got me thinking on how I have been applying the Spring Fever to my life & how I can incorporate more of this season’s newness to my life.

This week has had a very significant meaning for me…getting clear and clearing out what is no longer needed Or wanted any longer. The Deep Down Clearing out of any old bits of past pains, hurts and subtle yet significant trauma to the soul. This Deep Clearing was so intense and powerful it shook my body into a state of constant healing…Healing that was so much needed for me at this point of my life.

At times I felt as if I was in complete body exhaustion and wanted to just sleep the entire healing process away, yet, even in sleep I was healing on many different levels & layers & even realms. So entirely Huge was this healing process that words do little to express how huge of an effect this has had on me so far.
I know there is still more to come as I am in the process of the fine-tuning the healing within and throughout now. Now I choose to live in my newly cleansed Body & Soul as never before…reclaiming the spaces that were once filled with karmic dust that was no longer who I Am…I Claim this Body/Soul as Mine to Cherish & Hold in High Healing Love & Divinity for Evermore.

As stated earlier, that this past week cannot be put into words to express how very profoundly this experience has change the very Who I Am, So I am posting a song with lyrics put together with such an upbeat rhythm.

Ahhhhh…Christmas is over and had such a nice time, visiting Family I actually liked & appreciated spending time with. (Avoided the ones who drive me nuts & just don’t “get me”…hence the nice time)
Not at all feeling guilty about eating chocolates or having some Baileys in my morning coffee…nope, is a very nice & relaxing holiday time for me…no stress, just relaxing & chilling out…..

YIKES….New Years Eve is just around the corner… this is the one holiday’s that I just don’t like very much…Being single and having no romantic partner to be with….Just Sucks!!!
Really, it more than Sucks, quite frankly. All the shows, ads & movies are about “Ringing in the New Year” with your Love partner by your side…being all cheery and saying the magical countdown.…10…9….8….7….6….5…4…3…2…1..HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! Now that great, wonderful New Years Kiss…all is happy & bright & full of great things exactly at Midnight…because you are with your Love Partner. This isn’t how my many New Years Eves have been spent…quite the opposite really, being single & a solo parent…I’ve spent my New Years Eve’s with my children, counting down the final 10 seconds & shouting (or as my children have gotten older…just said the words) Happy New Year!

Don’t get me wrong, I love spending time with my children & I do love them. It is just not the same as celebrating with a Love Partner too. So, this year seems to affecting me more than past years and I just wanted to send out a quick survival kit to others, who also find themselves alone this New Years Eve’s night.

So… here’s my 2 cents on how to survive new years eve when you’re single.

1. Begin to view the idea of being single as a choice…With a New year approaching, do you still choose to remain single or can you choose the intent to find a loving partner to share your life with for this new year ahead of you

2. Create a Been There, Done That & Don’t Want to do That Again List (Better known as the low points of the year that you no longer want to hang onto)

3. Create a GreatThings That Happened This Year List (Better known as a Gratitude list)

4. Start with the Been There list…read it over slowly and take in the very fact that you survived & surpassed all these upsets or setbacks in your year…You Made It Through!

5. Now…go ahead and Rip, Tear, Shred, Throw in garbage or Burn this list…be done & say goodbye to the past and make room for new to enter once more.

6. Read through the Things That Happened list…read this list even more slowly and savor the high points in your year, the very things you are grateful for and say Thank You!

7. Breathe in this New Year with Happiness, with Eagerness and with Enthusiasm…Breathe it all in eyes closed and hand on heart to fully Claim This New Year as Your Year.

8. Celebrate this New Years Eve your way, feeling proud that you have done a damn fine job & you are worth Celebrating in every moment of the New Year ahead!!

Have yourself a Great New Years Eve Celebration, however you see fit to celebrate it!

Looking back through the year…there has been many, many changes. Last year at this time…I was at the beginning stages of my Breakdown; A BreakDown to get to my BreakThrough. I honestly fought this deep, deep lonely feeling until I could fight it no longer…As I laid in a pile of soiled tissues, chest heaving to that way down deep pain…pain & cries of the most primordial cry that we can produce.

My world disappeared before my eyes…the world where I knew who I was…what I was supposed to be doing…and how I fit into this world. Everything that I knew to be true…was yanked out from beneath my feet. Everything that I thought I had learned in the last 11 years, was coming to face me during this stripped away time…every lesson I went through came back to visit me, to see if I truly understood & got the lessons…got the lessons & could apply these lessons at a time when I was in my spiritually raw moments…when the masks were stripped off & the real, unpolished Me was just left to deal with these lessons.
My heart cried the tears that had been forgotten about so many years ago…my soul cracked open to let out the dark trapped feelings of fear…fear of being less than enough.

With the help of the Creator, my Guides, my friends and my soul family…I borrowed their strength to help me raise up once again…dust myself off and go through this Storm…the Storm of facing who I was & who I wasn’t…it was my Dark Night of The Soul. (This Dark Night… lasted for me about 4 months, not 1 night)

Going through this very troubling time has given me so many gifts that I would not have had without going through this dark & very tough period of time…It has given me…ME, who I am.

So… here’s my 2 cents on when breaking down leads to a break through.

1. BreakDown = Breaking Down All Defenses
2. BreakDown = Breaking Down All Old Patterns
3. BreakDown = Breaking Down All Blocks to Authentic Self
4. BreakDown = Breaking Down All that is no longer Serving your Higher Self
5. BreakThrough = Knowing Who you Are
6. BreakThrough = Knowing What your Soul is Here to Do
7. BreakThrough = Learning to Love All of Yourself
8. BreakThrough = Learning to Accept your past & Acknowledging great learning from your past
9. BreakThrough = Knowing You are Strong enough to go through Anything
10. BreakThrough = Fully Opening your Heart & Soul…to Love Greater than you have ever done before

May your BreakDown lead to your BreakThrough with Divine Grace…that leads to your Heart and Soul Opening.

These past few weeks have brought back many lessons to me in reflection…to see if I have remembered the learning from these lessons. Some lessons were remembered very well and I handled myself in a respectful & mature manner. Others….(Sigh!) still learning these lessons and have more work to do in these areas. The lessons that I thought I had learned so well last time…really humbled me this time, I got the full impact of how this lesson affects others around me when I’m not in my integrity & staying with my learned lessons. It is within the Humbleness & Gratitude that I received the learning once again…this time deeper learning took place.

I am reposting a blog from July 2010 on Humbleness and Childlike and Gratitude.

Humbleness & Childlike & Gratitude

There has been much discussion on how to tap into Source (Spirit, Creator, God, Goddess…)to receive Energy, Spiritual Enlightenment & our unique Gifts. There was the old and very limiting ways that served their purpose for many years; by studying many years with a Sage, Wise One or Spiritual Teacher, spending many, many hours in devote meditations for years and in servitude to your Teacher to show your worthiness This idea of obtaining Spiritual Enlightenment has changed very little for many years…until recently! Recently (last 10 – 5 years) there has been an Energetic Shift in the Mass Consciousness…This Shift has tested & in many cases broken the old ways of obtaining Spiritual Enlightenment. The Shift has caused many to ask the deep inner questions & by doing so have looked within…rather than to Others to find these answers. How, you may ask do they receive the knowledge they are seeking & find Spiritual Enlightenment. Stay open, humble & childlike.

So… here’s my 2 cents on staying humble, childlike & in gratitude.

1. Humbleness is: Knowing that Source is the Healer, Teacher, Writer, Painter…
2. Humbleness is: Becoming the Vessel for Source to channel the healing, teaching, writing, paining Through us
3. Humbleness is: Letting Go of your EGO and letting Source IN
4. Humbleness is: Remembering we are ALL the Great I AM…We care All ONE
5. Childlike is: Staying in a Pure state of Wonder
6. Childlike is: Being Open to Receive information, however it comes to YOU
7. Childlike is: Knowing that we sometimes (most times) do not know & this is alright
8. Childlike is: Staying Curious and having FUN along the Road of Discovery & Learning
9. Gratitude is: Acknowledging the Gifts you Receive
10. Gratitude is: Using the Gifts you receive for the highest good of all (Not controlling others or making yourself “better” than others)
11. Gratitude is: Sharing your Gifts with Others
12. Gratitude is: Saying Thank You to Source and Sharing with others