Devotionals

(First appeared on CRAVE HIM! https://cravehim.com/janet-w-ferguson/)She is Me by Janet W. FergusonThe woman at a well who had lived a scandalously sinful life, but Jesus offers her living water,She is me.The woman so sinful she washed Jesus feet with her tears, but Jesus forgives her sins,She is me.The woman called Sarah who tried to take matters into her own hands, and though she laughed, she still receives the promise from the Lord,She is me.The woman so distressed and ill, she longs to just touch the hem of Jesus’s garment,She is me.The woman named Martha, worried and upset about many things, while the only One thing necessary is right in front of her,She is me.The woman in a perfect garden with everything she could ever need, yet she chooses the forbidden fruit,She is me.The woman begging for mercy and healing for her children, just a scrap from the table from the Master,She is me.The woman who deserved to be stoned, yet Jesus offers her grace,She is me.The women not deserving anything but judgement, yet she’s freed, healed, restored, and love,She is me, and when you give your life to Him, she is you.

~~~~~Christian authors aren’t perfect. Many, like me, were prodigals in need of grace, now struggling to serve our Rescuer.

(First appeared http://www.heartwingsblog.com/2017/08/thou-he-slay-me/)

​Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him, Job 13:15 is one of the verses I’ve been contemplating. There are times when pain bears down, fear carves hard, love disappoints, and life falls apart. Jobs, health, family, church communities, and friends can fail. Like Job, everything seems to be going wrong, and we have no control.Yet Job speaks those difficult words in the midst of his physical agony and grief. Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him…Though He slay me, yet will I hope in Him…CLICK TO TWEETAnother story from Daniel about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego is similar. They are literally facing a fire, one that will burn them to death. Their answer speaks of faith.If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand.But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up. Daniel 3:17-18The faith that lies in that phrase “EVEN IF HE DOES NOT,” is incredible. A fire is where faith either dies and discouragement takes over, or faith kicks in and praises continue.Faith is pretty easy when all is well, but when we are facing the fire, facing the failure, facing the diagnosis, facing the financial crisis, that’s when faith gets real.Habakkuk 3:17-18 says, Though the fig tree should not blossom And there be no fruit on the vines, Though the yield of the olive should fail And the fields produce no food, Though the flock should be cut off from the fold And there be no cattle in the stalls, Yet I will exult in the LORD, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation. YET I WILL EXULT IN THE LORD!Lately, I’ve been working to make that decision. On Sunday mornings when I sing praises, in the car when I run errands, late at night when those worries creep in… Yet I will exult in Him. I will be thankful for the small blessings: a breeze, a song, my pets, a pillow. If I really search, I can turn my despair into praise. I can find something to be thankful for.It’s not easy. The apostle Paul describes his own pleading that was answered in a way that he’d rather have avoided.2 Corinthians 12:8-9 says: Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” God said no to Paul’s pleading. Our troubles don’t always disappear, but we do have a promise.When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. Isaiah 43Sometimes, knowing He is with us is what we must cling to, all we have. We are hard-pressed, but He says we won’t be overwhelmed or consumed.When many were turning away, Jesus asked his disciples a question.“You do not want to leave too, do you?”Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” John 6:67-69I love that answer. Where else would I go? I’d rather cling to the truth and the love of a merciful God. I’d rather exult Him!There’s a lot of fear and worry and pain in our world right now, maybe a lot of fear, worry, and pain in your life, but I hope you can find comfort in Him. I hope you can find a way to exult in the Lord.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33Are you in that hard place right now? Do you feel the heat of the fire? Does Though He slay me cut into your heart? Can we pray for you that you can find a way to exult Him?

The Frustration of Having a Weird Disease(First appearedhttp://www.heartwingsblog.com/2016/06/frustration-weird-disease/)Have you ever seen someone not walk their shopping buggy across the parking lot to the cart holder and judged them? Or maybe someone had a handicap sticker, but they didn’t look like they needed one, so you roll your eyes at their sense of entitlement parking close to a store.Oh, mercy, I used to, and I always have things come back to bite me when I judge! Trust me, I’ve had a long list of these judgement lessons.

When I was thirty-seven, I’d finally gotten back in shape after having my children—gotten rid of that baby weight. My son was four, my daughter eight, and I’d taken a position at our church coordinating the children’s ministry. I ran or played on tennis league most every day along with my job and my family duties. Until…I began having fever during the night. I’d wake up shivering, but the next day, the fever would be gone. This went on for several days, and then it ended. That’s when things went from bad to worse. My joints became painful and stiff. After another week with no relief, I went to the doctor. (Yes, I always wait things out.) I was diagnosed as having just a virus and sent home.Every day I felt worse. Fatigue set in like I’d never imagined possible. When driving, my arms felt like one hundred pound weights. At the last tennis lesson I tried to attend, I was winded just walking to the court, so I sat in the shade and watched. Going to the grocery store drained me for the day. At work, I’d plop down and make phone calls, sit and sort supplies, and just pray to finish everything I had to accomplish. I finally went back to my doctor.By the time I reached his office, I battled tears. I explained how bad I felt. This time, he did a few blood tests and concluded, I just had a “post-viral syndrome,” and again sent me away with nothing but an anti-inflammatory prescription. I was so down because I continued to decline. My chest hurt when I took a deep breath or sneezed. My eyes ached and I had to rest them often. My thinking even felt slow. My fingers turned white and became numb in the cold, even in cool air conditioning. And the worst for my vain self was when my hair began to thin. I called my doctor again—so upset. He finally told me that I did have a high ANA on the tests he’d run which could be a marker for lupus, and at last, sent me to a rheumatologist. Though terrified, I was hopeful that I might get some kind of treatment. Otherwise, I thought I was just going crazy.I learned that no one test diagnoses some diseases, but instead a person may have a group of markers that indicate a condition. The rheumatologist decided that I had a connective tissue disease with most but not all of the markers for lupus…sort of like a mild case of lupus.

Let me tell you, if that was mild, I truly feel for those of you with the full-blown lupus cases. I researched connective tissue and autoimmune diseases.

I ended up meeting and hearing stories from so many women who have had similar bouts of illnesses topped by the frustration of not being taken seriously or just not being able to find a specific diagnosis. From Lyme disease to fibromyalgia, there are a multitude. It can be frustrating, discouraging, and even hopeless, at times.But the things I learned were to not judge when people couldn’t do what I expected they should be able to do. I learned to depend on God more than I had ever before, just to get through the day. I learned to be a tad pushier when it came to my health and the health of those I was responsible for. I learned to be thankful for energy.I’ve taken lupus medications (antimalarial drugs) to keep my condition under control for fifteen years. Thank the Lord. For the past four or so years, I no longer have a high ANA, whatever that is. And I’ve learned to be thankful for a normal day.