I Come To Bury Terri Schiavo, Not To Praise Her

You know, in the political game, we too seldom take the time to appreciate the efforts of our adversaries on particular issues. So, with the clock running out for Terri Schiavo, I feel compelled to take a moment to congratulate the people who’ve fought so long and so hard to help Michael “When is that b*tch gonna die?” Schiavo feed his wife into the bureaucratic machine.

I mean seriously, you folks really kept your eye on that trophy corpse and wouldn’t let anyone dissuade you…which was tougher than it might seem and not just because the Florida Legislature, the Republican Congress, and even the President are fighting so hard to save her life. In one sense, that’s the easy part.

Personally, were I in your position, the tough part would be ignoring her family. You know, I’ll fully admit that I like to think of myself as a rational, logical, tough minded sort of guy — but wow, here we have a mother and father sobbing and begging for someone to help them save their daughter, and it doesn’t move you a bit. I mean just look at these quotes:

“Mary Schindler has pleaded with state lawmakers to save her daughter’s life.

“Please, senators, for the love of God, I’m begging you, don’t let my daughter die of thirst,” she said Tuesday outside her daughter’s hospice, before she broke down and was escorted away.

…In court documents, the Schindlers said their daughter began “a significant decline” late Monday. Her eyes were sunken and dark, and her lips and face were dry. The feeding tube was removed Friday afternoon.

“While she still made eye contact with me when I spoke to her, she was becoming increasingly lethargic,” Bob Schindler said in the papers. “Terri no longer attempted to verbalize back to me when I spoke to her.”

They’re offering to take care of her, to try to rehabilitate her, to have more tests done to see if she can partially recover…but that doesn’t phase you. You were tough enough to just look these suffering people right in the eye and say, “Sorry, we’d rather err on the side of death.” Is that playing hardball or what?

Heck, a lot of people might have questioned how much sense it made to allow Michael Schiavo to be his wife’s guardian in this situation given that he denied Terri therapy & that he has been banging another woman for ten years. But hey, if the court says he’s her guardian and he wants her dead, then it’s gotta go, gotta go.

So again, let me congratulate the “pro-death lobby” & the judges that fought so hard to see Terri Schiavo turned into grease on the wheels of the bureaucratic machine. Because of your efforts, it looks like she’s going to die of thirst soon, even while people are being arrested for trying to bring her water.

What a “great victory” you are about to claim over those of us who wanted to do some more testing to find out if a woman’s life might just be saved. So here’s to you: Clap — clap — clap….

John Hawkins's book 101 Things All Young Adults Should Know is filled with lessons that newly minted adults need in order to get the most out of life. Gleaned from a lifetime of trial, error, and writing it down, Hawkins provides advice everyone can benefit from in short, digestible chapters.