> get woken up by some doc who gives me ******* infinite bad news
> keep waking me up just to tell me how deep in **** I am, thanks doc
> tells me he has to make my dick bigger or something with plastic surgery, and I'm way too tired to argue
> finally someone's had it with his **** so they strangle him to death
> then she tries to strangle me to death and I'm so ready for the sweet release b0s
> some jackoff sets her on fire and chucks her out a window, lame
> stabs me in the neck
> keeps yelling at me like I'm the problem
> elevator explodes and a man made of fire stalks me through a hospital while I hide from people doing a floor by floor check for specific personnel with gas masks on like that makes any sense
> way more of this hospital is on fire than would ever be necessary or the work of one dude wtf
> finally get out
> immediately wreck a car
> don't worry guys, I escaped the whole incident running from a whale and a unicorn on a horse with a badly misplaced cowboy
> cowboy informs me that this was my first day on the job

Or we could be ******* sane straight people for 2 minutes and not obsess over assholes for 2 seconds

Inb4 anon comment
inb4 retarded rhetorical one liner response
inb4 ****** anime smug face with lousy pun
The internet used to be anti-gay as was the majority of the country, 10-15 years of media brain washing and other **** and you faggots are all for it" ahha how funny"
How you weak ass people are so easily swayed Ill never know

It usually happens between 1AM and 3AM, so a few hours after she's fallen asleep.
As stated before, she is nearly fully cognitive (or appears to be) because she can speak and respond to speech. She usually attempts to place my hand on her breasts (if I don't do it myself) and then she tries to get one of her hands inside of my boxers. If she doesn't succeed, she'll just stroke me through the fabric. Once she gets horny enough from having her breasts played with, she'll remove her underwear and then attempt to take mine off and has twice gotten on top of me if I don't move to get on top of her. She does all of these things while asleep.

She usually wakes up a few seconds in to the actual sex and just rolls with it, but has a few times gone two to three minutes before waking up. Once we (well I guess I) finished, she got up and put her underwear back on, and then she laid back down, all while still asleep and didn't remember it the next morning.

It's okay, he's dead now
It also turned out that he was sleeping with 2 other women and none of us knew.
And he owed thousands to drug dealers
I honestly always knew he was an asshole, I just really wanted to love him anything else depressing you want to know?

Well I'll keep it brief, you're just some anon on the Internet
You know those two, my boyfriend aleks died in a car crash, I was there, not immediately but long and painful in the hospital.
My family doesn't like me, but I have a pretty good life tbh
Moved here from Russia legally , poor workers, and made our way to middle class, apartment etc. Now I'm working on a law degree and I have enough money to eat, so I'm okay. Rough past though. being a minority in America is amazing, colleges and jobs are practically begging for me, a rape victim, a minority AND female? I'm sorry for all of you American born white males

I'm lazy, shy with no motivation to do anything with my life. I work a ****** tiring job only because it pays and I don't have to interact with other people. I was abused when I was younger, which developed into intimacy issues, I pretty much find all girls unattractive. I also have very little empathy for my family, i talk to and rely on pretty much no one. My friends have grown distant not that i care

My only happyness comes from a japanese girl that I talk to. Decided to learn the language 3 months ago, despite not being intersted in games or anime. Sorry for boring you.

You're not boring you
You don't have to find a girl attractive to love, you don't even have to find a girl
Keep working your job, keep talking to that girl, go to her one day. You'll find that when you're together life will get a lot different. Learning language is an honorable goal, if you've stuck for 3 months you'll do great. Good luck man, you seem like a great guy I have social anxiety disorder so I know where you're coming from

Okay.
I only allow friends to pm me. wow, reading through this has been... a blast from the past to be sure.
I'm sorry if your relationship doesn't last. It's..
Certainly difficult. For what it's worth I hope you find someone that makes you happy... even if it's not her.

Oh I'm so sorry.
This is... quite embarrassing. I was being stalked by an anon for a week... still am. I cleaned most of my friends out, anyone i didn't talk to. I'm sorry I put you through that. Please accept my friend request, I don't want to say goodbye
I'm glad you two are okay. Really, I am. It sounds like she really makes you happy.