THE COOKIES ARE HERE!!! They arrived in the office this morning in a HUGE box. Roger from the mailroom brought them up - I said that they were cookies and he should come back later to have some. He frowned and said, "But it's really heavy." I said,
"I know!"

I sent a note around the office advising the arrival of THE COOKIES, and there's been a steady stream of visitors into my office ever since.

[And there's even a special tin of cookies just for George V.]

Apparently my earlier comment about Blog Envy abatement was premature. The wolves howl again, in an e-mail I received:

Talk about token. I think the recent attempt by K to assuage our envy was pitiful. I, personally, do not feel bad about it since I have joined a competitor and K is now required by GC law to shun/belittle me whenever possible. The rest of you all being markets and potential/existing clients
should be outraged. I would be happy to arrange a group shunning of K (although I need to sort out for myself how I can shun while stalking).

LAWRENCE, KS—According to irritated friends and acquaintances, Jim Marder, 43, lives to correct pronunciation. "Actually, the word is 'Ant-arc-tic," Marder told coworker Amy Dennon during a conversation about polar-ice-cap melting Monday. "Don't feel bad: Pronouncing it 'Antartic' is a fairly common mistake." Said Dennon: "He's always doing that: 'Actually, the word is 'affida-vit.' 'Actually, the word is 'pre-rogative.' 'Actually, the word is 'sher-bet.' Every time, he plays it all casual, but you can tell he's loving it."

[As a brilliant person said at a Holiday Lunch many years ago, "Every office has a wounded chicken."]

I noticed a couple of rather odd headlines in various news reports lately. While the stories themselves are quite serious, I did a little double-take at these:

Any terrorists, or just "some"? I have a mental image of a CIA operative reaching into his pouch of chewin' tobaccy so's he can put jus' a pinch between his cheek and gum and saying, "Yep, I's gonna go kill me some terrorists!"

OK, OK, I know it's not a funny subject, but think about it. Death Row population drops because . . . they're killing them off, right?! All right, so the article goes on to read that the number of people sentenced to death row has dropped, but still.

Gahhhhhhh. No, that just makes me flinch. It's like a bad Saturday Night Live sketch.

And on a lighter note, here's an intriguing site - Monobrow.com. And yes, it is exactly what it seems to be. here's their Mission Statement:

At Monobrow.com, we don't view having one eyebrow as a grotesque, freakish human deformity. On the contrary. We think you are special (and not the kind of special where you wear a helmet.) The kind of special where people look at the hairy, catipillar-like growth above your eyes and say, "Oh my God! What the hell is that thing?" You're not alone.

Monobrow.com, celebrating the unity of your eyebrows.

Be sure to check out the Mono Bro of the Week. Here's the one for Week 11:

I'll never forget when I went on a date and the girl/boy said, 'Is that a moldy pickle on your forhead, or are you like, a total freak?' I removed the pickle for the rest of the night. NOW I realize that my monobrow is special, and I was crazy to try to hide it under a pickle. It's what makes me different and, in my opinion, better than other people. What others think about me is none of my business.