*dramatically pirouettes and leaps in* “BIG SWORDFIGHT IN HER MOUTHHH”

“Aww that seems like a relationship that would last.” “Yeah until one of them blows up” “I guess you could say their love is….. explosive”

*Our choreographer screaming like one of those sheep used in parodies back in vintage youtube days whenever she gets frustrated or needs to get people’s attention.*

“So you’re going to do a Jesus lift” “A WHAT” “Just put your arms out and they’ll lift you like you’re Jesus resurrecting from the cross”

“Welcome to Newsies on steroids.”

“Be the closeted gay we all need.”

“The first step to any good plan is murder.”

“How much bitch is enough bitch though?”

“Imagine having to explain to someone like ““oh how’d you break your tailbone?” ““Oh I booty-popped too hard.””

“When we go off to makeover Veronica, can she still have the monocle, but, hear me out, it’s now bedazzled.”

“I have to check the historical accuracy of bedazzling in the ‘80s.”

“Okay, but what if we made it gay?”

“COSTUME NOTE: SOMEONE MAKE RAM PARTY SLIPPERS!” “What if they’re like bunny slippers, but with tiny party hats?!”

“This is Ram, he’s not very nice, but somehow my best friend still wants to fuck him.”

“Your whole bio better be about how much you love and respect women or else I can’t help you when your ass is being kicked.”

“I paired you guys together because you say he’s your sort of boyfriend later.” *Kurt proceeds to emark in various sexual dance endeavors with multiple other women* “That’s where the sort of comes into play….”

“SHUT UP HEATHER” *bursts out crying*

Our original Chandler dropped out so our original Duke got promoted to her role and just looks at me and says “Oh my god this is the most Heather Duke thing that has ever happened to me”

“That’s a school cheer?!?!”

“Real question: WHO HAS A FUCKING LOCK ON THEIR CLOSET?”

“What if when she makes you spit up the pills, your wig flies off?” “Oh no you’ve discovered the real reason behind my crisis, I AM NOT A NATURAL BLONDE”

“Maybe he should take up knitting or something as a hobby rather than therapedic murder.”

“Veronica, it’s not a phase. I’m just naturally a slightly psychotic bag of angst with great hair.”

*music director teaching us Blue* ”They’ll curl up on your face. And purr like-” *slowly looks up from music and proceeds to put his head in his hands* “There’s moments that I evaluate my life and this is definitely one of them.”