Yes, you can part with it

Updated 8:57 am, Monday, October 17, 2011

When I bought the Vera Wang dress last fall, resale value was on my mind. Like buying a home, or a car, the dress wasn't a forever item, but rather a "for now" purchase.

A used dress generally sells for about 50-percent-off retail, but since I paid less than that to begin with (about 30 percent the original cost), I can make out on this deal.

This isn't my first gown. A few years ago -- before I met The Husband -- I bought a wedding dress on killer sale at J. Crew. That one didn't work out, but even then I was budget-minded.

Here's the thing, though. The majority of women are more emotionally attached to the frock they wear to get married and wouldn't even entertain the idea of selling it off.

Only about 23 percent of brides say they would sell their gown, according to research conducted by PreOwnedWeddingDresses.com, and about 45 percent would "consider it."

Of course, considering doing something and following through are vastly different, and if the feedback from the Times Union's On the Edge blog readers is any indication, plenty of brides believed selling could be a great idea, before they wore it down the aisle, but then the majority didn't part with the frock.

Women save their gown for many reasons. Most often, holding on to it is about attachment. They say they could never part with the clothing they wore on one of the most significant days of their lives. But most brides likely have dozens of photos, which capture how they looked -- and felt -- that day. Memories are powerful, and typically can't be destroyed by a flooded basement or fire in your home, nor can they be sold or traded, like the gown itself.

The whole "your daughter may want to wear it one day" is also dismissable. My mother's gown was too tight for both my sister and I, and since less than 1 percent of the female population is 6 feet (my height) or taller, the likelihood any daughter I may have would fit in my gown is slim.

And, fashion evolves. What is fashionable in 2011 won't be in style five years from now, let alone 25.

Instead of trying to pass down her gown, Mom had it taken apart and made into a handbag, which my sister and I each carried on our wedding day. This was the most personal element at both our weddings.

Still, I can't come to terms with the idea of having the wispy, thin Italian silk of my gown ripped apart, which is another argument for selling it -- the dress will get worn, not destroyed.

And, if you think of this from the buyer's point of view, a secondhand gown gives many women the opportunity to have a dress they may not otherwise be able to afford. Some women even believe buying a wedding dress is like the Cinderella story where the gown and glass slippers lead to a Prince.

A reader from Canada recently emailed me about a secondhand dress she purchased at a church sale. The 50-year-old divorcee intended to try on a few dresses as a "manifestation thing," she said. Instead, she ended up with a $1,400 gown for $125.

She's hoping the dress will lead to a husband.

She'd read my old column on that J. Crew gown and wanted to know the length of time between my purchase and meeting The Husband.