Akubra hats

There are only a select number of occasions where the wearing of an Akubra hat is permissible (1)

You are a stockman, roustabout, work in a Rodeo, ride with the brumbies in the Great Dividing range, are a figure of Australian folklore and/ or are Bob Katter

You are in a national sporting team and some dickwad in government thought it was patriotic for all of you to wear it and hey lets stick an indigenous design around it to show we are still so very very sorry

You are a tourist, most probably of American ancestry, are dissapointed that you haven't seen any koalas yet despite not leaving a capital city and you have bought one to meld in (2)

You are Dick Smith or some other national celebrity who is so painfully Australian that it embarrasses everyone else who lives in the Australia of today (3)

or you are a dickhead

It's that simple

Feel free to print out this guide so you don't get confused and wear one inappropriately

(1) Akubra hat can be interchanged with Dry-az-a-bone through our this guide(2) You don't(3) You know the one which doesn't have a chip on its shoulder