Judge Judy is hospitalized after a bizarre on-camera ramble. Vanilla Ice becomes a mime. Lindsay Lohan looks for an apartment in New York. Thursday gossip is in recovery.

Judge Judy Sheindlin, national treasure and daytime tough-talker, was rushed to LA's Cedars-Sinai hospital yesterday after she "suddenly started saying things that didn't make sense, during the taping of her hit courtroom show," possibly because she was doped up on painkillers from oral surgery she'd had the day before. Judy also complained of "intestinal discomfort." She eventually told TMZ, "I'm just exhausted, and my body was telling me it needed a day to chill…. I'm exhausted. I'm just tired. A lot of things just zoned together, including the bad news of the world." Existential dread, senseless rambling, and a fistful of painkillers? If the National Enquirer doesn't run a story about JUDY'S DEATH WISH next week, I'll eat a bag of gavels. [TMZ, Radar, AH, image via WENN.com]

The fame magnet formerly known asLindsay Lohan is "actively looking" for a New York apartment to share with her younger brother formerly known as Michael Lohan Jr.: "She loves it here," said mother Dina. "And she has a lot of friends who already have places, so she might sublet." Over/under on LiLo's first NYPD arrest? [NYDN]

Speaking of Lindsay, the jewelry store that accused her of stealing a $2500 necklace is now selling tickets to watch the surveillance tape of Not-Lohan's supposed theft. You can stream it for $2.99 on Kamofie & Co.'s ridiculous website, NecklaceVideo.com, which bears the tagline, "The Video Speaks for Itself." I hear it speaks with the voice of Golem, and sings this Abba song. [Radar, NecklaceVideo.com]

Britney Spears is getting sued for $10 million by a company involved with her perfume line, but since Britney Spears the Corporate Entity has precisely zilch to do with Britney Spears the Human, it's not that interesting. [Radar]

Remember when Suri Cruiseplayed with penis-shaped gummies at a store in New York? Katie Holmes addressed it on The Ellen DeGeneres show: "I was horrified. P-e-n-i-s gummies. I said, oh wow those aren't Swedish fish…. I was like, why are selling these here? This is for kids. And then it was on the cover of a magazine that I'm giving her those gummies!" Don't worry, Katie, nobody thinks you'd buy penises to put in Suri's mouth. Cruise-bought penises are for Tom's mouth only. [Us]

The Trumps are spawning: 29-year-old Ivanka Trumpannounced her pregnancy in January, and now big brother Donald Trump Jr. says wife Vanessa is pregnant with their third child. [Us, @DonaldJTrumpJr]

Speaking of spawning, Rachel Zoe debuted son Skyler Morrison on her website. The picture is straight out of 1965, when ladies came home from the hospital in formal outfits. I like to imagine that, as soon as they were done taking this picture, Rachel put on a ratty hoodie and threadbare scrubs, and ate cream cheese straight out of the tub. [RachelZoe]

Meanwhile, Elizabeth Banks introduced newborn son Felix Handelman on her website. He was born via surrogate and is a "very happy baby." [ElizabethBanksBlog, People]

Leonardo DiCaprio will earn a reported $5 million for a Chinese cell phone commercial. Go burn your college diploma and sleep in a cardboard box by the train tracks, already. [E!]

Vanilla Ice will make his debut as a mime (!) this spring at famed Chatham pantomime venue (?) Central Theatre. [BBC]

Balloon Boy dad Richard Heene made a music video about how much he loves Charlie Sheen. I could not have predicted this, but now that it has happened, I can only say, "of course." [TMZ]