It's time we face facts: Looking for Alaska will most likely never see the big screen. The beloved John Green novel about kids at boarding school has been in development limbo for over a decade, and one of the last big updates about the project was also one of its most heartbreaking.

After some fan-casting, Mills made Perks star Logan Lerman the protagonist, Miles "Pudge" Halter. His crush, Alaska Young, is none other than his Stuck in Love crush, Lily Collins. Pudge's roommate and Alaska's BFF, Chip "The Colonel" Martin, is bae Josh Hutcherson, while Emma Watson is Pudge's girlfriend, Lara Buterskaya.

Weave in songs by The 1975 and Keane, and you've got an A-plus faux-trailer about teens worthy of our time. Check out the vid above and try not to cry about the current state of Green's inaugural novel.