I had on white denim shorts and a bright blue tank top. Thin beige bra straps left lines on my shoulders. Gi wore the t-shirt of a band he likes, an incongruously loud pair of shorts, and red socks. Neon Bible played at low volume on the speakers.

We nestled together on the sofa. I lifted his shirt and deposited kisses on his chest. I mouthed the nipples, sucked and licked until they were hard pebbles. My tongue followed the line between the ribs, up from the belly to the midpoint of the torso and back down again. The kisses were audible.

Gi had me raise my arms and removed my top. He struggled with the hook on my bra but succeeded in freeing my breasts, which he then proceeded to suck. Lips on top of the areola applied pressure while the tongue flicked over the nipple at high velocity.

I gasped at the attention.

My hand reached for the tent in his shorts. Having outlined the extension of the shaft through the cotton, I pressed the heel of my palm against the cylindrical bulge and rolled over it.

Gi continued on my breasts. I pulled his head up for a kiss. I inclined my body backward, and Gi lowered on top of me. I liked his body heat as our bare chests made contact. Our tongues fought a boundary skirmish between lips. Occasionally, one of us made incursions through the gap between teeth, only to be chased out.

I loosened the shorts and reached into the boxers to extract his cock. The head stuck out the top. I bent at the waist to lower my lips onto the swollen crown.

Gi smoothed his hand over my shoulders and back. A hand slipped through the dip at the small of my back into my jean shorts. Gi feathered his middle finger into the cleft of my ass. He cupped the buttocks possessively.

He didn’t let me suck him long. He pulled me up for a kiss. His tongue lapped at the saliva on my chin.

I undid my belt buckle and tugged the buttons of my fly open. The yellow panties I wore had a mesh panel in the front. My arousal had seeped into the fabric. Gi placed his hand on top. The fingers made a curve as he followed the depression in the center. I bent my right leg at the knee and pressed it flush against the cushioned sofa back. Hooking my left leg between his, I separated my thighs as far as the denim allowed.

I had one arm behind his back. My hand tilted his face down to meet my lips. He gave me his tongue to suck.

The hand slipped under the elastic waistband of the panties. He extended a digit to hold a long note on my slit. The flesh of my pubis sloshed from side to side like a liquid as he shook his fingers laterally.

I moaned with the pleasure of it through open mouthed kisses.

As he stroked my cunt, I reached for his cock so that I could hold some part of him. My fingers tightened over Gi’s scrotum and massaged it through his shorts. I gripped the short hairs on the back of his head as the already intense kisses became still more so.

At moments, a finger dipped past the lips into the entrance of my vagina. Mostly, he stroked the labia and circled the clit. The movements were slow and steady, but they were firm. My leg twitched.

As my need became more urgent, I stopped kissing him. My eyes screwed shut, and my cheeks winched up. Knowing that I would come, I grimaced at the acuteness of the sensations below. My buttocks pressed against Gi’s thigh as my body shifted nearer to him. The wetness leaked from me. My pussy made soft sucking sounds.

He rubbed me harder. He took hold of a tit and covered the nipple with his mouth. I squeaked and giggled with the pleasure of it. My body wriggled from my waist down to my toes.

I squeezed my breasts and compacted my legs about his hand. The clit shuddered. The pussy imploded and turned inside out. The orgasm exuded out of me. It wet my thighs and left my panties moist. His hand was slick in my spendings.

Gi kissed me once I had finished writhing. He went to the floor and removed the shorts and the panties and feasted on my cunt. Before long, his tongue and lips had me coming again. My fluids drenched the cushions of his couch.

A reader e-mailed me to ask what it feels like to mix pain with sex. I thought I might use my latest meeting with Amadeo to elaborate on the experience.

The two of us were naked in his bedroom. After eating me out until my juices dripped from his chin, Amadeo used cords of hemp rope to affix my left wrist to my left ankle and my right wrist to my right ankle. With my knees propped up, I laid diagonally on the mattress with my back flat. A pillow supported my head. The blindfold negated my vision. My nipples were swollen from the clamps he had employed half an hour before. He trailed the end of his belt softly along the inner surfaces of my thighs. The touch of leather over the pubis was feather light, gentle, very nearly inconsequential. It floated over the pussy lips, barely making any contact with them. It almost tickled. Then he brought the end slashing down.

A searing pain began in the labia. Circles of hurt radiated outward as the nerves responded. I winced at the blow. My knee pulled up and my body twisted over to one side. The abrupt and angry activation of the nerve endings set me to shaking. Chest heaving, I swallowed gulps of air.

He gave me a few seconds to gather my composure. I let my weight sink into the mattress and spread my thighs open for him in acquiescence. I remembered that he had turned my ass purple the last time we had played.

This time the belt landed directly over my clitoris. After the cunnilingus, the area was excruciatingly sensitive. The hood may have been down. It would have offered feeble defense even if it were not. I screamed. There weren’t words to the bellow. It was a loud confession of pain and rage. My pubis burned with a fiery ache. I squirmed on the mattress. Deep, tearless sobs wracked my body. By exertion of will, I forced myself to take large, steady breaths. I stretched open again and waited for the next sharp blow.

Anticipation stretched out in the silence of the room. My muscles were tense. There was a tightness in my respiration. When the blow came, he struck my clit again.

I called him a motherfucker and a bastard. I wriggled against my bonds and curled one of my thighs protectively over my cunt.

Amadeo very gently eased me to lie flat on the mattress again. A slight, but insistent pressure against my knees extended the chasm between them.

He hit my thighs at the crease where they met the pubis and continued over the legs, leaving my cunt alone. This hurt, but far less than before. When he mixed in the occasional blow to my pussy, I could tolerate this pain. The sensation was not as intense as what had transpired previously.

Amadeo spit on my cunt twice and rubbed the saliva over the lips with the knuckles of his hand. I knew that the next blows would hurt. I gripped the bonds between my hands and my feet, steadied myself, and waited. Indeed, he struck the labia as I had known he would. He missed slightly, so it was a glancing blow rather than a direct hit. He corrected for the mistake, compelling my knees open, flashing the leather down from immediately above. This one really scorched. I sobbed under the blindfold without actually crying and shrieked my fury at him. He folded the belt over and strapped me again. Quite deliberately, the sting landed in exactly the same place as the one before. I spit at him — it was the only thing I could do — but as I was blind, missed badly in my attempt. The globule of expectorate arced onto my breasts. He hawked in my face to show me how it should be done and slapped each of my cheeks.

He traded the belt for the cat-o’-nine-tails. He swung this instrument more freely and fiercely, with less precision than before. The multiple falls meant that several places would hurt at once. But the ache induced was also more diffuse. Additionally, I had gotten used to the whipping; the nerve endings became partially sensitized to the pain. He applied the tails to the thighs more than to the cunt. He lashed my arms, my belly, and then my breasts. I squealed impotently as the cat thudded against my tits. I heard the wooshing sound, the brief movement of air, the momentary breeze on my perspiring skin. Then came the hard landing and the needles shooting pain into the dermis.

At the last, he used the riding crop. “Bastinado,” he said, and he beat the balls of my feet. “Boobs,” he said, and slapped the breasts from the sides. “Ten over the cunt,” he said and made me count. In order to alter the direction of impact, I heard him change sides every few numbers. His hand soothed along the inside of my thigh and coaxed my legs apart. He whispered reassuring words. The gentleness stopped at speech, however. He didn’t moderate his strength.

Whipping is an exercise and an assertion of his power over me. That is the heart of its appeal. I am tied up. He can do what he wants. I surrender my body to his violence. I do this of my own accord. By refusing the security of the safeword, I volunteer to accept the next hard blow. I embrace the pain because a man to whose dominant character I have acceded gives it to me in his generosity. I wear his marks willingly over my skin. I feel so alive as the hurt is administered to me. This is my submission.

The tears started at three. My nose went runny at five. There aren’t words to describe the agony and torment I experienced at seven, eight, and nine. Ten impacted me as a blissful release. The suffering was finally over. Amid the bawling and the howling and the sniveling beneath the blindfold, I also laughed aloud at the completion of the whipping. An overriding sense of accomplishment accompanied the conclusion of the act. I had endured. The pain had excited the nerves. It made me feel awake to the moment. It echoed still. The flesh thrummed in tempo with my pulse. I hurt in places I could not name. This aroused me.

Amadeo kissed me and filled my open mouth with wine. This aroused me, too. He unknotted the rope that bound me. When both hands were free, I plucked the blindfold from my face and threw myself at him. I bit his lower lip and gave him my tongue, taking his. Large paws cupped my tits as we made out. The outside of my cunt throbbed. The muscles in my legs were suffused by ache. My shoulders smarted from being tied for so long. My ankles and wrists were raw from straining against the rope. Small, parallel welts crisscrossed the insides of my thighs. (Evidently, he had applied the cat with greater vigor than I had supposed.) My pussy lips were battered and bruised, deformed and sore. These were minor discomforts now.

“I want you to fuck me,” I told him. I stroked his cock, which was mostly hard.

He fumbled for a moment with the packaging of the condom, then gave up and bit the wrapper open. Once he was sheathed, he leaned his weight against my chest. Opening my lips for his, I fell backward. My legs spread, and his body occupied the room that I had made. I grabbed hold of the shaft and placed it at the entrance of my pussy. Gravity took care of the rest. Amadeo penetrated me, sinking all the way in all at once. I sighed in relief and happiness at the sudden fullness of my cunt. The presence of cock gratified me. It was the axis of my globe. Raising the pelvic floor, I collapsed the muscles of the vagina around the shaft. My ankles hooked about his buttocks, and my arms wrapped his back to compel him closer to me. He fucked me with energetic movements of the hips and pelvis. His lips told me with kisses and words how beautiful I was. His fingers combed through my hair, which was soaking wet. He had not come yet. I had barely touched his penis during foreplay. He did not last long inside my much abused pussy. He lasted long enough to have me convulsing about his erection in the half minute before his own climax.

We had been lovers for quite some time, but had only been officially dating for four months when I took him home to meet the parents for Thanksgiving. It was a full house. In addition to my brother, my sister, and my sister’s boyfriend, we had one set of grandparents, two pairs of aunts and uncles with an assortment of cousins from early teens to college age, and my Dad’s graduate students. In the mid-afternoon, as final touches were being made on dinner, I went to my bedroom upstairs. The boyfriend intercepted me on the way down.

Pressing my body against the wall, he kissed me with a hunger. Instinctively, I kissed him back the same way. He extracted his penis from his pants and had me lift up my dress for him. Nudging the panties to the side, he entered me. The straps of my dress snagged against the brick. It skinned my shoulders. I struggled to keep silent. Violent kisses stopped my gasps. The fear of being discovered by anyone at all filled me with absolute dread. This was a quickie fuck. The sex couldn’t have lasted more than five minutes. During the meal, my boyfriend’s come leaked from my cunt and soaked through my underwear.

— 2 —

I had on a black ankle length dress and a white top. In a playful mood, I teased my boyfriend throughout Sunday’s football games. Going to my knees before him, I lipped his penis through the jeans. The press of a thigh over his groin raised the erection. I sat atop his lap and did a grind against his cock while I whispered seduction into his ear. This went on until he lost patience.

He threw me to the floor. A Swiss army knife stabbed through the fabric of the dress and slit from top to bottom. He cut until the dress was only rags on my body. The blade then sliced through the tank top. He snipped the red bra with greater care, and the cups fell from my breasts. After rolling the sharp and cold blade over the lips of cunt, he poked a hole through the front panel of my panties, then ripped. The rent he made was large enough for his cock. I was so immensely turned on. I was his rag doll. He pounded me while I was clothed in tatters.

— 3 —

He tied me to a tree in the woods in Maine when we went camping during Fourth of July weekend. Stout rope bound my arms high above my head. It wrapped my chest and waist. When he penetrated my pussy, one of my thighs rose to the jut of his hip. My leg vined down behind him. My shoulders and back experienced the coarse textures of the bark of the tree trunk. The sound of sex echoed in the humid air. We sweated profusely under the heat of an unforgiving sun. Perspiration stung my eyes. When he released me, he cut a shoot from a much smaller tree, stripped it bare of leaves and branches, and crafted a switch, which he applied to my ass and thighs. No one was there to hear me howl in the woods in undistilled hurt. No one was there to hear me scream in all encompassing pleasure on the previous autumn’s leaves while I was thoroughly fucked once more.

He and I skinny dipped in the lake to wash away the dirt and the grime. The frigid water refreshed and revived me in the heat. We dressed, cooked a meal at a nearby campsite, packed, and shouldering heavy backpacks, resumed our traipse through the woods.

— 4 —

Because of the open relationship, I sometimes saw evidence of sex in our bedroom. There were blindfolds stained with another girl’s mascara, dirty sheets wadded up in the laundry basket, toys drying in the dishwasher, used prophylactics in the trash can by the bed. The niche in the shower contained bottles that weren’t mine and weren’t his. When I kissed him on returning home, I might have tasted his lover on his tongue. Of course, none of this bothered me. I had the reverse of the coin as well. Other men dominated me in our bedroom. I submitted my body to them.

At night, we shared our stories. Hearing him tell me how he had spanked, then fisted, then fucked another girl while I held his penis in my mouth left my pussy sodden. When I told him about my adventures, invariably, he would slap my pubis. Who owns this cunt? he would ask. You do, I would answer. When his erection reclaimed my pussy, which was also his pussy, the force of orgasm was intense. We used condoms with our others. Only he came inside me. He came only inside me. For the final act, I lapped the semen that had spilled from me, onto the sheets. It made the wet spot on the bed even bigger. I liked falling asleep on top of it.

Catching up on work and life takes priority over blogging. Therefore, I have no long post to give. Here are short takes on catching up with my stable of lovers in London.

• Amadeo brought me over his thighs and tugged my jeans and panties down to my knees. I had to keep track of the number of times each buttocks was hit and say the number aloud. He confused me by striking the cheeks at random.

• After he came in my mouth, I spit Amadeo’s semen onto my breasts. It left a sticky trail in its wake as it ran through my cleavage.

• Face lowered to the mattress, I was on knees and shoulders as he wrenched my arms behind me and hauled me backward by the wrists. Pussy yielded to cock. One of his knees dug into the mattress. He planted his other foot to my face. I kissed Amadeo’s big toe.

• Frank stood behind me, cock to one side. He held my hair in a ponytail as I sucked him. While I deepthroated the cock, my fingers splayed on the outside of my cunt. The digits diddled my clit. He came over my face. The stuff got into my hair. Frank isn’t shy about his semen. We shared messy kisses afterwards.

• I clutched the yellow pillow and the side of the mattress. Frank clutched each foot just above the ankle. I stared up at the ceiling and took in measured breaths as his thick glans penetrated my anus.

• Fingers laced with his, I gripped his hand long after my knuckles turned color. Frank ate my cunt with ravenous intent. I came over his face, too.

A Brazilian boy: After an impromptu makeout session, I sucked him off on the roof of the youth hostel late at night. Because we didn’t have any condoms, that’s as far as it went.

The construction worker: He was an Irishman on holiday with his mates. I met him at a dance club, to which I had worn a cocktail dress that was barely decent. The top of my head didn’t reach his chin. His chest was pure muscle. Though his hands were calloused, his touch on my arms and my waist and my ass was gentle. He exhibited no such gentleness when he fucked me. He took me the way an alpha takes his bitch. He made me sweat. I enjoyed the challenge of trying to fit his cock into my throat but never quite managed the trick.

Boy on the beach: My bikini had blue and white stripes and a shining silver border. I had pulled it into the crease of my ass and lay on my stomach, tanning myself. When I rolled over, I discovered a boy staring at me from behind.

“J’ai été en admirant la vue,” he said.

I followed his eyes to the horizon, which consisted of high rise beachfront property, and grinned. He plopped himself down on the sand beside my beach towel. We communicated in my pidgin French and his equally limited English. As the conversation progressed he rested his hand on the inside part of my thigh. Since it was there already, I asked him to rub sunscreen into my skin. I doubted his complexion could tan, but he slathered some over his chest as well. I invited him back to my hotel in the late afternoon. Boldness must have its reward.

Le club échangiste: In Paris, I was a woman alone at a swingers’ club. I must have fucked six different guys during the three hours that I was there. I left in the company of a newlywed couple. They had an apartment in the 11th near Bastille. It was a studio, far tinier than my place in London. The sofa folded out to a bed. The two of them ate my pussy and ass simultaneously.

Sequential one night stands: First: the bartender in a hole in the wall pub who plied me with free cocktails throughout the night. We finished at his place. I went by bus across town to my hostel in the morning. My pussy was swollen from the 6 am fuck, the 8 am fuck, and the 9 am fuck. I had the ache of sex in my muscles. Face flushed red, I reeked of copulation. I wondered who around me knew. Second: the slightly overweight local who picked me up at the same bar the next evening. He sighed when my tongue swiped through his hairy chest and whimpered when I nosed into his hairy ass. When his cock was not in my pussy, his fingers took up residence there. I enjoyed open mouthed, wet kisses with this gray headed man more than twice my age. I liked licking the semen, sweat, and vaginal secretions from his tangled pubis. The penis returned to its maximum extension as he watched me do this. He couldn’t get enough of my tits.