Your post proves flyonthewall right.
Yesterday she pointed out that if she made a post that was considered bitchy it would always be brought up and used against her, while you anons can get away with saying anything because there is no handle associated with that comment. You can snipe at anyone and say anything because there's no accountability for what you said. More often than not, flyonthewall's posts here are wise, witty, and insightful. She offers good advice to newbies as well as regs here. But she's being targetted by anons now, simply because you can see who she is. Your problem with her is that she's right about the anons who hide in grey in order to say something snarky. You get away with saying things because no can you on it - if they did you can just say "oh that was a different anon" and no would know if you were telling the truth or not. And, based on some of the anon comments yesterday, some of you pride yourself on the fact that you can get away with saying things anon online that you could never say in real life. I feel nothing but pity for those of you who have to lash out at strangers and aren't even strong enough to own up to what you've said.

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I had a boss once who was complaining about
upper management's homophobic attitude making it uncomfortable for her to come out. I told her she had far worse homophobia to deal with than that. When she asked me what I meant I said, "Look in the mirror. You think there is something wrong with being gay, that's why you're hiding it." (This was based on several in-depth discussions we had previously.) She just looked at me stunned and she was like, "Crap. You're right."

Do I?
If this is meant to be constructive criticism, then you will need to cite a list of specific examples over a period of at least a few months, and I'll actually take a look at them to see if I should censor myself more. I will not deny that I have a tendency to be judgemental, and there are certain posts that push my buttons, but I don't actually take pleasure in causing other people pain, despite what you might think.

Your post proves flyonthewall right.
Yesterday she pointed out that if she made a post that was considered bitchy it would always be brought up and used against her, while you anons can get away with saying anything because there is no handle associated with that comment. You can snipe at anyone and say anything because there's no accountability for what you said. More often than not, flyonthewall's posts here are wise, witty, and insightful. She offers good advice to newbies as well as regs here. But she's being targetted by anons now, simply because you can see who she is. Your problem with her is that she's right about the anons who hide in grey in order to say something snarky. You get away with saying things because no can you on it - if they did you can just say "oh that was a different anon" and no would know if you were telling the truth or not. And, based on some of the anon comments yesterday, some of you pride yourself on the fact that you can get away with saying things anon online that you could never say in real life. I feel nothing but pity for those of you who have to lash out at strangers and aren't even strong enough to own up to what you've said.

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I'm torn honestly.
I think that sometimes there is a valid reason to post anon - for example, you (general you) want to say something about a past experience that you don't want associated with your handle. (Of course you could create a new handle for such posts.) I think the anons who are taking advantage of overwriting their handle for the purpose of sniping are ruining it for those who post anon for good reasons. I'd rather people who post anon thought about why they were posting anon and chose to only post anon when it was needed. Personally, I like feeling like I know someone by looking through their posting history. I have an idea of what handles make what types of comments. I know who to read and who I'd rather not read. And I like being surprised when someone posts something completely different than what I would have expected to see coming from that handle. (Hope that makes sense, I'm still caffinating myself.) You just can't develop an idea of what someone is like if they only post anon. (Not that online personalities necessarily reflect reality, but that's another issue.) So I guess what I'm getting at, is that I would prefer people only posted with their handles and only post anon when they have good reason to. I really don't want to take away the ability to post anon, but, like I said, those who post anon for the sake of sniping are ruining it for those who post anon with good reasons. If we had a vote to go R+ or not I would probably vote R+, because it would probably help the tone in here. But I would rather people acted more responsibly so that we didn't have to make that decision.

I think that's giving the anons too much credit
and most of the regulars here know that going R+ would suck a lot of the life out of the forum. That said, at this point I would vote for it just because I think the forum is degenerating under an onslought of abusive grey sniping.

how I see it is, if a handful of greens,
such as the mentioned above, were to quit being so snarky to anyone and everyone except their selected few, people would not have to go gray. That would help the tone in here far more than going R+. The snarkiest people in here are longtime green handles!! I understand that you think they are fine and dandy and feel the need to defend them but they are a problem and color this entire forum, so to speak. But if you want to go R+, fine by me. It doesn't mr all that much to me but I do think you should be able to see that greens snark an awful lot too, even if not at you.

everyone can post what they like.
do you really think that it was ever all hearts and rainbows here? I was met with snarkiness, and a lot of what you 'regs' now were newbies, and didn't fit in with who was considered a reg then, and were met with snarkiness initially. people that are considered 'regs' is constantly changing! there's no point to complaining about being cked - ignore the cks and continue to post or leave. those are the best choices. the worst choice is to stay in a place you don't belong in and complain that it's not what YOU consider to be friendly. there are plenty of dyke/queer messageboards/chat rooms. why not browse through them and findto your liking?

you do realize that we're all snarky to each
other. the problem is understanding - regs that have been here awhile/know each other in real life understand the tone and delivery of most posts. again, being a green handle helps because you can associate a personality with that person. I'm snarky, but I also like to help people, if you've been here awhile you pick up info like that, which helps you get a better picture of the person. newbies, obviously, don't know any of us, and it feels like we're all jerks - but we're just sarcastic and being jokey to pass the time. again, I had the same experience! it's not hazing, it's entering a group of friends and understanding where you fit in. again, you can choose to ignore it, if you feel it is juvenile. you cannot control your environment, but you can control your response to it.

I assume that you are talking about me
and I don't know (of course) if you are the anon I was arguing with yesterday, but really I refuse to take credit for the snarky tone of this forum. Apparently I offended you before yesterday (under your green handle?) because I've tried (except for thatslip) to keep ad hominem attacks out of our arguments. If you want to give me examples of how I'm snarky to anyone and everyone, then have at it, but so far your attacks on me have been too general to address.

but see
Since you know you don't like her and/or her tone, when you see her handle you can easily skip over her posts. If you know you don't like her and still continue to read her posts, then it's your own fault for reading posts from someone that bothers you. There's really no point in repeatedly pointing out that you don't like her.

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