Is Luongo Foreshadowing an Imminent Trade With Cryptic Emojis?

Figured I’d post a screenshot for those of you who use Twitter in your browser and haven’t been able to see the cryptic symbols Roberto Luongo is tweeting out on this, the busiest Canucks news day in months.

While we’re at it. Why don’t we put our "Tom Hanks in the Da Vinci Code symbologist hat" squarely on our heads and try to figure out what Luongo is trying to tell us.

Here’s the first tweet featuring the classic "stressed out humanoid" Emoji:

So I think we can infer from this first tweet that Roberto Luongo is sweating the upcoming trade deadline and his uncertain future.

The second tweet?

Clocks a ticking, and Luongo isn’t getting any less stressed out about what’s going to happen next you guys!

And the grand finale:

So after all of that, it turns out that Roberto Luongo just has to poop which we should’ve guessed. Also presumably it’s his need to poop that is stressing him out, perhaps because he’s waiting in a long line for a public stall. Wait a minute, Roberto Luongo waiting for a public stall, or is it a public Staal? Luongo to New York for Marc Staal (E3).

Looks like we figured it out.

Update:

OR DID WE???!!!??!!111!!!

Since we first posted this blog post Roberto Luongo has sent out two more Emoji symbols, and these ones seem more urgent:

An SOS symbol? Does this mean Roberto Luongo couldn’t hold it anymore and pooped himself? Or does it mean that he’s been asked to waive his no-trade clause to join Columbus?

It’s tough to tell! Oh and one more:

There’s so much dual meaning in these tweets. Like the scary red alert phone could indicate that he’s on a trade call where he’s finally being asked to waive his no-trade clause. Or it could indicate that he’s called one of his teammates, close friends or relatives to bring him a change of pants…

All we know for sure: that Troll-berto Trolluongo is in fine form this trade-deadlines eve.

The red phone was probably because Luongo just got a call from Kim Jong-Un because Jong finally realized that Dennis Rodman is more insane than he is. Plus, he wants tickets to the next Canucks game and they are too pricey even for a dictator.