Brazilian Dating Guide For Men

It’s generally easy for a Western male to date in lower income countries, especially in Latin America. Being a Westerner automatically associates you with money, and a chance for the girl to obtain a visa back to the richer country. It also draws in girls who might be tired of the macho-infested culture and are eager for a change. This is certainly true all over Latin America.

Except Brazil.

After spending more than a year in Rio, I thought I’d give some pointers to guys that are interested in going to Brazil and dating Brazilian women.

(Disclaimer: My experience is based on my stay in Rio de Janeiro — so if you’re staying elsewhere, your mileage may vary)

The Rule

The universal rule is that Brazilian girls usually fall into two camps: those who exclusively date Brazilian guys and those that have dated and are open to dating foreigners (gringos). This alone sets Brazil apart from the rest of Latin America. Signs that a girl is open to dating a gringo, she has lived/travel abroad, she speaks great English, she had/has gringo friends, she hangs out in places where gringos go, etc.

Speak Portuguese

This seems obvious, but it’s not. If you only speak English, you will most likely meet girls who speak English and have travelled/lived in US (or Europe) and hang out around gringos (see #1 above). On the other hand, if you speak Portuguese, you will meet all Brazilian girls, and it’ll be harder to filter which ones are open for dating a gringo. Knowing Portuguese is obviously a plus, but not as important as it seems at first.

Gringo Factor

Unfortunately male gringos in Brazil have a negative reputation as prostitute seekers and exploiters of Brazil’s natural resources (i.e., women). This creates a double standard. The girls are especially sensitive to such stereotypes, and as a result they will take any negative “asshole-type” behavior very personally. Even a light tease that’s culturally acceptable anywhere else can result in backlash, while the same behavior from a Brazilian guy can be totally acceptable. This means in the initial encounter, refrain from any questionable teasing and keep things very friendly.

Venue is important

If you go places that charge $50 cover, then you would expect to meet girls who are interested in meeting well-off guys. However, if you go to street parties, and cheaper places, chances are the girls will be more down to earth. In Rio, Ipanema and Leblon have the most beautiful, but richer girls, while Lapa and Botafogo have more down to earth variety.

Looks are important

Rio is a beautiful city situated with mountainous landscapes and blessed with a gorgeous beach. Girls are beautiful as well, always dressed to the nines, refusing to leave the house without without high heels. They take care of themselves, and expect the same from guys. So remember to GTL (Gym, Tan, Laundry) before you go to Rio.

Do you want a drink?

Brazilian girls are direct

Unlike in US or Europe, girls here play much less games. When approaching a girl, the girl will know very quickly if you’re her type or not. If things are not moving forward within the first 10-15 minutes, it won’t go anywhere. Just politely eject and keep going.

Be aggressive

If on the other hand, things are progressing nicely, slowly go for a kiss after fifteen or twenty minutes of conversation. A kiss doesn’t signify intimacy in Brazil, but kissing quickly is normal and is part of the mating ritual.

Things move fast

After you get the number, it’s OK to call the next day and schedule a date for the following or same evening. You do not need to wait 2-4 days like in US.

Keep it simple

I know in the West, dinner and movie is the norm. In Brazil, keep dates simple. Meet her at the beach, go for a drink at Devassa Bar in Ipanema. Go to a Hippie Fair in Ipanema on Sunday afternoons, or just grab a coconut juice on the beach. It doesn’t need to be expensive or complicated. The cheaper the better.

Have fun

Many guys get wrapped up in trying to attract the girl by impressing her. This wouldn’t work in Brazil because above all Brazilian culture is extremely chill, and people value a relaxed atmosphere over a serious or deep conversation. So don’t try too hard and just have a good time.

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James is a writer and traveler. In his former life he worked as a software engineer in Silicon Valley. He's now a permanent traveler who's been to over 75 countries and lived in 15. His mission is to help all men embrace the location independent lifestyle and live life on their own terms. Learn more.

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Finally a nice, down to earth & so correct post about carioca’s :))) . You’ll see that after spending time here the Leblon/Ipanema girls will be approachable as you’ll mingle in better & are able to get rid of the gringo status. I’m living here for about the same time as you, love every single day of it, but had to adapt my approach to women & thoughts I had about Brazilian women before coming over here. Keep up the good writing/work 🙂

I lived in Rio for a few years, and it’s an awesome place with it’s own pros/cons. Having been out of Brazil (which I consider its own continent) for a while now, I now have some new realizations which probably deserve a post of its own.

respected dear:
my name is afzaal ilyas i am from pakistan i also like travelling to different country and i am student of software engineering. but i have no lots of money to travell another country and you help me in this situation and i work in different country.
thanks

Lol, interesting… I think you got it right in most parts. Being a Brazilian girl who has dated a few foreigners (specially Americans) and who knows US culture very well, I can give you a female perspective of the tips you gave here. I agree with everything you said except for the when you mention guys should go for a kiss after 15-20 min of conversation, coming from a “gringo” that attitude would look odd, we know that you guys wouldn’t do that with american girls, why would you think you can do it here? Got it? That can ruin everything. Wait for the right moment to kiss the girl. That might take the whole night/afternoon / whaterever… but definitely kiss her before the night ends 😉

” but definitely kiss her before the night ends” – I couldn’t agree more. Being a Brazilian girl living in the US, it really annoys me that a guy spends 3 hours of “trying to impress me” conversation, very little flirting, and goes for a good bye kiss.
Don’t be afraid! 😉

Time is not an issue for me. Decent tips but the Tan part, that does not apply to people of color nor does dressing properly. I am deciding between Brazil/Argentina or Central/Eastern/Northern Europe for LTR Only. This was helpful but only just, decent blog though.

I read that you were most of your time in Rio. I was living up in the North East of Brazil for a year, in Recife, and found it a lot less expensive than Rio. Also it seemed much easier for Brazil dating. The main reason for this is that I found the beaches at Rio were mainly filled with tourists, as opposed to the beaches in the North East Brazil which were full of local Brazil Girls, and not many tourists from Europe.
I actually arranged my visit through the RomanticoBrazil website, although I did have a lady to stay with that I met on-line. I would say that the North East is definately the best area of Brazil for Brazilian dating.

Hi all, my name is Marcelo, im from Chile, i’m the kind of guy who has not too much sexual, dating or hanging-out experience with girls, im 21 now, i met a girl from Brazil in internet, and what the article says is true, but except for the fact that i cant do anything from the webcam haha. Well, im a bit worried about the posibilities to date girls around 18 – 25, because i’ll be around 23 when i get money for travel and meet this beautiful country and the expected friendly people. Also there is a fact that i look older than my real age (27 sometimes), so that’s why i ask about that range age of brazilian girls (18 – 25). Another thing is that Chilean girls are a more cold, they dont hang.out too much, chilean girls just kiss once or fell in love, and they are a bit more hypocrites in relationships. Well, i’ll like to know the age of you guys, overall of the writer of this article, to know how to get a very nice experience even if a to old to date this kind of girls. Thank you very much, and sorry for my english, i’m still trying to improve it (not google translator used). See ya!

If you’re a normal foreigner looking for a decent girl just try to be honestly yourself. In general a Brazilian man suits better a Brazilian girl mainly because of the natural mutual understanding, however the human being factor should be the most important asset. A man can sense the responsiveness of a woman, no matter where.

Marcelo…reading your post, I don’t think the ‘age thing’ that you mention is going to be a problem for you. It sounds like you will be at a perfect age for Dating by the time that you go. It you want to look at some of the Recife girls, that I mentioned above, before you go, go here, like I did, to [spam deleted]
I am about ‘double your age’… but usually, you will find, that Brazil woman (un-like European ones) don’t mind men that are quite a bit older..as long as they can support themselves…i.e…Have some money and a job !

ell, as a Brazilian (carioca) lady, I would like to say about being aggressive and move fast will be only welcome if the guy are very confident that we really liked him and we had strong physical attraction because I if we are not ready yet, that quick move can spoil the whole date. Brazilian like long talks..long intelligent conversation before any touch. Unless is a soft touch 🙂 If you guys love the Brazilian ladies and the culture, please check my website Please read the Terms of use before you get your free trial with no commitment with the web..but with the girls! they are all waiting for a serious single gentlemen who knows how to treat a woman like a lady, how should always be 🙂 Good luck!
Denise.

This seems ridiculous…!! I’m from Rio and like, 10% of that is true. Sure, we are chill but not all girlies over here are like that. There are A LOT of weirdos and less popular (or whatevs) people. Idek, lol

I’m a brazilian woman, and if I’m talking to a guy and he simple decides to kiss me after no matter what time without telling me, I would slap him. And not just because I have a boyfriend!

It’s easy to mistake interest, because, I admit, brazilians are more “open” to talk and touch while talking, unlike other people around the world, but that doesn’t mean we expect kisses or even that kisses don’t mean intimacy. They may not mean a compromise, but intimacy is another thing entirely!

I would be more carefull if I were you! I was offended by that, and am sure other women would be too!

You sound like someone who would be offended by a lot of things. Girls don’t want a guy to ask before he kisses them, no girl is turned on by that. Also if you are slapping guys for trying to kiss you then you clearly have attitude problems.

Usually not, unless it’s in a club and I can tell from the way she looks at me she wants to kiss. Communication is over 75% non-verbal, so you don’t need to ask someone to know if they want to kiss. A man can naturally escalate to a kiss without ever mentioning kissing. Women much prefer a man who can escalate naturally and never asks permission.

Max

I guess you are from a place in Brazil called jungle?

I am from Austria and kissed a lot of Brazilian women who visited Vienna and never had a single slap from them.

That is called attraction, we don’t kiss someone that doesn’t attracts us!

You need to take shower and piss off with your boyfriend, you are ruining the true Brazilian image.

I am also a brazilian girl. So, for you to know, most of us hate to be threaten like sexual objects made for kissing and having sex and fun. Most of the girls you’ve kissed were probably desperate hoes looking for gringos or brazilian men in the bars of the city. If I met a man and, after half an hour of talk, he kissed me, I’d slap him too. We, brazilian women, know very well of what we’re talking about. So we’re not ruining the “true brazilian image”. You are, by saying that most of us kiss the first guy we meet. That is so not nice, so please stop.

“Most of the girls you’ve kissed were probably desperate hoes looking for gringos or brazilian men in the bars of the city.”

Why do you have such hate towards other Brazilian women? You don’t even know them.

That’s not a very attractive trait.

Diogo (BR)

In Brazil to kiss the face (not mouth) is common when you are being introduced to a girl. To kiss girls at mouth depends the place and your nonverbal communication. Inside a party for example is more easy to meet people open to kiss, in a restaurant the people are not thinking that. But for all rules always has exception, there is not a 100%. Other example in carnival week you dont need to talk to much, but it’s my point of view (brazilian man). About gringo approach (except kiss) I think is correct.

Maverick, dearest, you just forgot to say that these girls you’ve just mentioned are only available in Copacabana at night, and they do charge you! Not to mention that some of them are not even girls (in case you hadn’t noticed when you kissed them in the first 15min.)!!!

Regular Brazilian girls NEVER fall for sexist assholes like yourself and your followers.

You failed to tell men that cohabiting in Brazil with a women that a man is held accountable to alimony should the two part.

You also failed to mention that all the stereotypes about Brazil women being whores of all economic levels are true.

If you don’t have the ability to get with an American woman than develop yourself. Brazilian women have been taught that their primary assest is ass or beauty of some sort. They expect that American men are rich, which you typically are as most of these people are extremely poor and ignorant.

Thats cool and real, man. Im brazilian from Sao Paulo and the same rule is here. For the first time I read an article who keeps respect and TRUTH about what it takes to have a chance on us.
Thanks for posting

I met, for the first time in my life, a Brazilian girl in the USA in 1999. We’ve been talking for a few months over the Internet before we met in person and kissed after the first 15 min or so. This girl is my wife for 15 years already! 🙂 Love is life!

If a Brazilian chick admires you already then you only just need to say your name and where you come from ,and she will do the rest for you , all you need to do is to be available and open for her to feel free about kissing you and doing what ever she likes so long you are willing ..
Women are like shoes made for men to wear but definitely every pair or shoes dont fit every man ,so men should go in for their right sizes ,same thing applies with women too .

Great stuff, Maverick. I’ve been following you for years and I must say this information is spot on. Remember now: Brazilian women MUST be feminine because most of Brazil is a sex paradise for men. Literally, American guys go down there to bang the pros without speaking 1 word of Portuguese. When you have lots of options, it makes you very picky. Thus, why Brazilian women love direct men. There’s so many options that she doesn’t want to play game. The cards are stacked in your favor.

I won’t go into the dating scene in the USA and UK because it’s such a joke. I rather not discuss it anyway. Brazil is the best country for men in the western hemisphere. However, you need to use common sense as well. I’ve seen lots of gringos end up in bad situations (including myself) due to lack of cultural understanding and just plain foolishness.

That’s why I wrote a book on everything you need to know before you visit Rio de Janeiro. Brazil is pretty big but I still think Rio is the best city in the country.

I wrote the book after spending 1 year living in Brazil. There’s a lot of good information online but I think you will benefit from reading my book. If Maverick is interested in reading it, I can hook you up with a copy for free.

Thanks again for the great blog and I’m looking forward to your commentary on Eastern Europe. I got a friend who fell in love with a Russian girl last year and he’s been begging me to go there. I’m still on the fence, but would like to hear your thoughts about Russia. Thanks Maverick!

Keep in mind when people in these articles say Brazilian girls they mean brown girls; generally mulatas, pardas, and light skin Portuguese females. Do not think you will go to Brazil and land a blonde blue eyed girl. Also, the far south of the country RS/SC/PR is basically a different country from Rio, and this area is White-Brazil. They are more like Argies than Cariocas.

In any SA country the White girls are generally off limits. If going to Porto Alegre splurge and hire a Gaucha escort.

I am in Brazil now and it doesn’t seem like a good description.
Lets say that the majority of Brazilian girls are not beautiful or even cute. Many have bad faces, LOTS of fat girls. I would say the average girl is not more attractive than an American girl and definitely much less attractive than Colombian. Maybe in clubs the situation is better, but on the streets you are lucky if you see an attractive girl in an hour.

They do play games, a lot. Lots of flaking, lots of lies.

Every hot girl in Brazil has lots of hungry men after her, so she is not gonna feel like you are a catch. She is a catch and she knows it.

of course, this is my experience and this is mostly about Sao Paulo, but saying “Brazil is sex paradise for men” is complete bullshit.

First of all I am a brazilian woman (from the North) and I have to tell that I loved what you wrote! I was just curious about how north americans and the european people see the brazilian women, so I started to research… I have to confess that it made me quite sick.
I’ve born in a big family in a very poor place of my city (Belem do Para). My parents had no money to pay a good school for me and my brothers and sisters. But ever since I was a kid I always liked to study english and to know about different cultures. Brazilian people knows how expensive is to study foreigns languages in Brazil. Therefore, I started to study it for myself. I am 31 years old now and I speak english and spanish fluently based on my own curiosity and talent. When I started to study english I was only 11 and I never thought that would like to find a “gringo” and leave Brazil.
The brazilian women are not just about sexy. We are romantic in a high level, we are not searching for a rich man, we are educated and classy, we like to take care of our man, but we are also love to be independent. Yes, we love to dance and take care of our body because it where our soul live. We are spiritual beings and we are conscious about our worth.
So, before you stereotype the “brazilian women” get to know Brazil first. And, please, never ever judge place, people or whatever it is based in what you read on internet.

So what if you are not a gringo, but from the UK, born in New Zealand, with Portuguese, English, Kiwi and Jewish blood, look like a Portuguese person yet speaks perfect English?.

So what then?.lol.

Personally, no one can really tell you how to get the perfect woman. I look at Brazilian ladies and think, wow, I wish.

Even though I am 38, look in my mid 20’s apparently, I still do not think I would ever get the dream Brazilian lady I would love to settle down and have a family with.

Your advice may work for gringo’s, but reality is, you would be exceedingly lucky to get the woman of your dreams, whether that is in Brazil, UK, America, wherever.

Good luck though, I am off to Mangue Seco region for 3 weeks holiday. Yeah, it would be amazing to meet the lady of my dreams, but it will be whatever.

The problem is, that unfortunately, the English and Yanks have given the west a bad name in Brazil. Even though I do not look like a gringo, I have a totally English accent. So God alone knows what they will think of me when I visit.

All I know is, Brazil looks like a beautiful country with its beautiful people. Looking forward to the beaches, chilling out and who knows, maybe I will meet my dream lass walking along the beach. But I am not going to go out of my way to find it, or it will ruin my holiday, in it.

I’ve been traveling back and forth to Brazil, most of the times to RJ, for the last 15 years. Im not Brazilian but have a few Cariocan girlfriends.

Original author gets some things right but it greatly depends on if you’re after a short fling or a serious relationship. Tips from the original article apply to the former but definitely not to the latter.

From experience, serious Cariocas from good upbringings that you can look into establish a relationship, will slap you straight on if you move as aggressive as trying to mouth kiss after chatting 15min…

Obviously you need to establish a connection, and that can take anywhere from 2-5 dates to happen.

Rio de Janeiro, summer, sun, wonderful beaches, tiny bathing suits, fit bodies, big smiles and a hell of a temper. That’s the idea you might have about Brazilian women, right?

So you think you know Brazilian women? Well, you have been WRONG all this time. Listen to what my mother taught me.
How do I know that? I’ve been living with a Brazilian women for almost 33 years now: my mother. And I must tell you that being an American citizen with a Brazilian mother and a British father is like a PhD course in human relationships. Very few men in this world had the chance to experience the temper of Brazilian women in such deep ways and here is what I learned.

First of all – Brazilian women hate being treated as a cliché. Never forget this! Brazilian women are well aware of their reputation around the globe and they don’t like to be stigmatized. Neither because of their bodies, nor because of their temper. So, if you are interested in Brazilian women, put your prejudices behind.

Just a tip: if any of you guys try to do any of what is saying in this damm list the greatest thing you’ll get here in brazil is a hello to the cops in the police station and/or a kick on the balls and/or a slap in the face.
oh, and ther eis always the canc eof a great laugh.

Really nice advices, that is for sure. I am a Portuguese that goes to Rio to work in the IT business (don’t know for how many years), and I consider myself a little bit nerdy (I guess my field of works does that to people), and therefore a little bit shy, so I was wondering if you happen to good dating websites, just to explore that option first?