Content warning: Every single thing that happened in this blog post was consensual, enjoyable, beyond wonderful. If you are likely to be triggered by male dominance, and role-playing sexual aggression, you probably won’t enjoy this, but I most certainly do.

Sometimes the difference between a lovely fuck and a powerful orgasm can be just one sentence. It’s true: it’s really, undeniably true.

When I’m alone, coming up with a new scenario which will power the majority of my wanking for the week, the most crucial things aren’t the settings or the characters, but what they say to each other. There’s no point conjuring a threesome with two guys (one much older, one my age) who strip me from the waist down then fuck me over the table during a police interrogation if they refrain from actually interrogating me. The difference between an idle daydream and a full-blown wank fantasy that’ll bring me directly to orgasm, is what the people say while they’re fucking.

It’s important that they punctuate the filthier words with a fuckstroke between each. I know not why.

Often I forget how important these little phrases and sentences are when I’m having actual sex because… well… often I forget to speak when I fuck, as does he. We’re so busy enjoying the feeling of sticky hardness – why would we need to mention to the other just how much we love it? But the other day he said something so good it made me remember.

In the middle of a vigorous, angry, role-play shag in which I played the horny desperate one and he played the dude who was using me as a convenient fucktoy, he said something so perfectly pitched that I couldn’t help but come. I was close, of course – the vicious pounding coupled with a lot of foreplay (and by ‘foreplay’ I mean ‘him beating me as I sucked his dick, then beating me harder if I didn’t do it exactly as he asked’) meant I was teetering dangerously close to the edge of orgasm. He had me on my knees on the edge of the bed, curled into a ball and gripping my ankles.

The power of one sentence (don’t worry, I’ll get to what it actually was, I promise) stayed with me for far longer than a simple “I’m gonna come now” or a “your cunt feels so good.” Both of these things are great, of course, but they don’t linger in the same way as something totally unique, something new. Something – like the following phrases – that guys have said to me and I haven’t been able to shake from my head.

Some of these are years and years old, but I still get wet when I think about them.

Sexiest things ever said to me

“Get on my cock.”

Simple, effective, casual. The use of ‘get’ rather than ‘sit, making it ever so slightly colder and more distant. Drawled with a lazy sigh, as he unzipped his fly and pulled out a thick, satisfying erection that he’d been packing for a while. Drawing our chit-chat to a close with an order so confident I couldn’t bear not to comply.

“Sssh.”

The first time a guy used this I was surprised that no one had used it before. I’d had ‘be quiet’ and ‘careful of the noise‘ as gentle reminders not to disturb the neighbours, but this was completely different. It had nothing to do with what he feared others would hear, and everything to do with him embracing the role of the dominant one – ordering me to do something that was difficult for me, so I could better concentrate on what turned him on.

You were expecting some more unusual things guys have said, though, right? How about this…

“I want to put a scoop of ice cream down the back of your knickers and bury my fucking face in it.”

This phrase, whispered in a voice hoarse with lust, struck me dumb for five minutes. We were sitting in a pub, deciding on whether or not we’d fuck again, whether the aching need for each other outweighed all the rage we felt for each other elsewhere. It was such a perfect expression of the weird love/rage/lust that we both felt, with an extra dose of worshipful need. I didn’t fuck him that day, but as we parted at the train station, in a mournful ‘goodbye’ hug, it took everything in my power not to bite into his neck.

Where were we? Oh, the sexiest thing. The one I promised to tell you at the beginning.

It was during the most vigorous minutes of the fuck, as I was trembling with the effort of trying to stay in position. “Keep hold of your ankles,” he told me, and my cunt tightened. As he shoved his dick into me with sharp strokes, I struggled to keep hold of them – to maintain the tight, curled posture that allowed him, standing up by the side of the bed, such easy access to my cunt. My neck hurt, and I shifted, losing grip on one of my ankles. He grabbed my hips and pulled me back.

“Hold that position.” Each word punctuated with a fuckstroke, just like it is in my dreams.

I held it. I held it for longer. I slipped again. By this point he’d given me enough ‘that’s it’ and ‘good girl’s’ to have me dripping down the inside of my thighs, which were shivering with the stress of staying still and the beginning of the build to a hard, heavy climax.

Then I slipped again. And he said it:

“If you don’t hold this position, and I can’t come, I’m going to beat you so hard.”

And I came. Squeezing around him and shuddering all the way from my thighs up to my chest, I came so hard I thought I was going to push his cock out of me. Which I would have, of course, if he hadn’t been in ‘dominant’ mode, and holding me tight against his crotch so he could feel every single inch of my cunt throbbing and constricting around his dick. Milking the spunk out of him as he tipped over the edge too.

I imagine that line, like the ice-cream one, or the first ever gruffly-whispered ‘sssh’, will stay with me for a long, long time. I may forget how it felt, or the way the room looked, or the tingling feeling of his huge palms slapping my naked arse, but that sentence won’t leave me – it’s pitch, timing, tone, all perfectly tailored to my individual kinks. When I’m old and frail and incapable of holding that awkward sex position, I’ll remember the guy who ordered me to, and bite my lip with nostalgic desire.

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This was at a point where I was desperately trying to deny just how much I wanted this man (there were reasons) and he was pointing out just how feeble those denials truly were. It wasn’t long after he said that that I finally cracked.

No. That is, in fact, the complete opposite of what I said. Normally I’d be totally up for having this conversation, but I’m going to stop having this chat now, because so far you’ve commented a few times and each time been relentlessly negative. Why bother reading a sex blog if all you’re going to contribute is snarky opinions on what you, personally, don’t find hot? I don’t get it, and I don’t think I want to.

I’m a huge fan of dirty talk, either giving or receiving. I’m usually the one saying it, though. Here are a few that I’ll still be fantasising about for years to come (and, obviously, anything degrading are all things said to and with people who I knew had both a thing for me and a thing for that kind of talking).

1 – A woman who had been flirting with me online for a long time. We’d played around a little bit, but not done much. We were at a big event, with a very busy bar. I stood behind her in the middle of the bar, and she pushed back against me just enough to feel my erection pushing up against her arse. As she does, I whispered into her ear “Do you think anyone else in this bar knows just what a slut you are?” She told me later that she did not stop thinking about me saying that until my cock was in her later that night.

2 – One thing I love is telling the person I’m with to say specific things (and yes, usually degrading – it’s a turn on). We were playing very, very rough, with lots of restraining, hair pulling and struggling. At one point while I was fucking her, I said “tell me what a *fucking* *whore* you are”, pushing harder into her on the starred words. By the time we both came, she was telling me over and over again “I’m a fucking whore… I’m a fucking whore” while I was telling her just how much I was using her. She and I did a lot of roleplay, and talking was a big part of that. What really made it, more than anything, was hearing how much it turned her on to say such filthy, degrading things.

3 – Same person as #2. This one was all about the set up and the way she’d say it. We were in a shed (it was during a party) and she was sucking my cock. I’d set up a challenge for her, as she liked me slapping her, so she had to suck as deep as she could and when she pulled back for breath, I’d slap her – very lightly at first. Her choice then was whether she’d stop or whether she wanted it again. But she could only do it again if she asked for it harder. We went on like this for a while, and eventually the point where I could see her deciding and hesitating before she said ‘harder’ and then pushing her mouth as deep down onto my cock as she could… I’ll remember the way she said that for decades.

4 – At a naturist sauna with private and group play areas, a woman and I had been talking for ages. We were both seeing others, so had agreed to be off-limits with each other, but after hours of naked flirting, joking and finding out just how into the same things we were, both of our resolves were weakening. We were in a jacuzzi and I had my hand on her back, which was slowly wandering lower and lower. I asked if she minded and she responded by thrusting her hand between my legs while grinning, saying ‘well, I can always do this…’. Somehow, it surprised her that I had an erection. The grin dropped, her mouth opened and she looked right into my eyes as she said ‘oh my God, you’re hard…’ as she tightened her grasp around my cock and started stroking me. I returned the favour for a few seconds – still with us both keeping eye contact – for a few seconds before we both stopped and agreed that as much as we both wanted to, we wouldn’t. But the way she said that, the way she.had her hand tightly around my cock, how wet her cunt was as my fingers pushed inside her, and the way my heart went straight into my throat…

Oooh, the last one of these holds a particular appeal for me – I *love* when guys utter, with total surprise, “you’re so wet” – I imagine it has exactly the same effect the other way round. There’s a gorgeous combination of: “what, me?” and delight at their own hotness that just makes this kind of comment awesome.

Two simple little words do it for me: “Bend over.”
Could be the kitchen counter, his desk, arm of the sofa, or hopefully one day over a wall in the countryside, either just saying it or accompanying it with a push down on the back of my neck…

Oooh, yes! I’ll add to that ‘pull down your knickers’, which has similar directness. I also like it because it’s usually incredibly casual. My guy uses ‘bend over’ and ‘pull down your knickers’ as a way of initiating sex casually, so that if I don’t fancy it I can brush it off with a ‘nah, not now’. With more involved/drawn out seductions, I always feel like if the other one’s not into it, they tend to give unnecessarily long explanations for it. I like the simplicity and quickness of ‘bend over’, ‘hell yeah’ or ‘take down your knickers’, ‘nah, maybe later’ as a very practical and speedy sex trick.

‘God that’s fucking amazing’ through gritted teeth as she was on top, pounding down on me hard as I fucked her holding her hips. For the ego boost it was, as well as the way she said it.

‘I want you to come in me’. Again, not just for what was said but the context. We were not supposed to be fucking. We’d agreed to use condoms, but in the moment, her body hot, sweaty, red chested below mine as I was fucking her, her gasps and moans asking me, *pleading* for my come inside her…..hot.

For me, it’s not a specific word or phrase but anything (could literally be the grocery list) panted hotly into my ear, particularly if it involves a lot of hard consonants. During sex it pushes me right over the edge. In the car, at a bar, in the grocery store, etc, it makes me immediately wet and longing for it.

Got a few….
“Fuck me, you’ve drowned me!” After I sat on his face & squirted…
“Your pussy is beautiful…I’m going to show you how beautiful by making you cum all over my face.” I did….
And the obvious favourite, reading other comments, “You are always so wet….why?” “Ummmm….you? What you do to me? ”
Bad past experiences, including being told I’m a prude/frigid etc made me hate myself. These comments make me feel fucking fabulous!

Otherwise it’s very context-dependent. Sometimes ‘no’ is incredibly hot. “No, you can’t do that – *don’t* do that.” And then of course I do it…but that only works when accompanied by a fairly high level of trust.

God, this is a great post. Words are so fucking powerful, and the people who know how to use them to good effect in bed ought to be treasured. I might write about this too, if you don’t mind…

Mmm… yes – that’s a hot phrase! I couldn’t agree more that those who know how to use words are to be treasured. I think most people can, it’s just that you have to accept that not everything will hit the mark. It’s a bit like being a comedian: you have to test out loads of jokes that won’t necessarily go down well, in order to find those gems that will have just the right effect. Feel free to write on this too if you want!

Oooh, that’s excellent. I don’t think a guy has ever actually shouted my name in bed. I’ve had subby guys saying ‘Yes, GOTN’, and ‘thanks, GOTN’ when I’m doing things to them, but never name at point of climax. I might have to ask for that and see how it goes down.

That certainly would have my attention and I suspect I wouldn’t be able to make it past the first even marginally secluded spot without having him inside me (unless he was deliberately going out of his way to deny me until a time of his choosing, which in its own way is even hotter).

I love words. I particularly love filthy words deployed in a sexual context (the more crass and shocking, the better). But I find accents and tone of voice can be an incredible turn-on for me, too. I know this guy who has THE BEST voice: Impossibly deep, sexy and melodic, with an upper-class twang and an ever-present hint of amusement. I remember on one particular occasion, said guy entwined his hand in my hair, pushed my head down onto his cock until I gagged and said ‘just fucking take it!’ in that voice. As favorite phrases go, it’s not particularly original but I swear that when he said that a small part of me died and went to heaven.

Discussing a threesome with someone, me making a silly joke about falling off the bed, him: “It’s difficult to fall off a bed if you’re tied to it.”

Holy fuck. We’d both done and said some incredibly filthy things to each other but the spontaneity of that, the matter-of-factness, just left me speechless. I’d have jumped him right then and there if we weren’t in a café eating sandwiches…

I’ve recently worked out how to get my wife of 11 years into dirty talk and sexting and our sex life has, well, a new lease.

Two instances stick in my mind from recent sessions… Whilst bringing her off with my tongue lashing her clit and two fingers jammed in her pussy, I reached up to pull and twist her nipples (as earlier requested ;-) and was told through a groan “no…..Just my cunt” as she was so close. I have known this woman for 20 years, loved her for 13 and never heard her use that word before. I swear my dick has never been harder, especially as seconds later she was clamping her thighs round my head and pushing my fingers out of her cunt with the force of her orgasm. I think of this episode several times a day still and my cock twitches every time.

The other instance was me to her….. she’d already come twice, but as I was fucking her slowly with her legs over my shoulders and looking in her eyes, I was telling her what I think about when I wank….. Her pushing her arse in the air and head in the pillow, reaching back to pull and squeeze my balls as I push into her…..her deep throating my cock wearing cheap lipstick that leaves smears over my shaft…… and her lying there having just been fucked senseless, legs akimbo, chest flushed, thighs quivering, pussy lips red and puffy with my spunk dribbling from her cunt. On the last words she came as hard as I have ever known, clenching and tightening round me so hard I couldn’t hold back myself. normally she likes it hard and fast, but told me afterwards the power of my words brought her off from nowhere.

So I let out a ‘good girl’ once during a blow job and the lady giving it to me stopped the moment I said it and bellowed “I’m not a fucking dog!”. She’d never been so offended. I thought it was a pretty safe thing to say.