"The right ring finger. ... No, THE LEFT RING FINGER!" It's minutes before sunrise at Westchester's Kerlan-Jobe sports medicine clinic and Johnny Knoxville has very nearly, accidentally, authorized orthopedic surgery on the wrong hand. His uninjured hand. A clinic administrator taking down Knoxville's information shakes her head in disbelief. Within the hour, the co-creator and breakout star of MTV's cultishly beloved series "Jackass" - and a trio of spinoff movies that have a combined gross of more than $335 million - will be under general anesthesia and no longer able to rectify any self-inflicted finger fiascoes.

In a move that could disappoint gift givers and would-be collectors, Walt Disney Co. will stop issuing paper stock certificates. The Burbank-based entertainment giant has long offered physical stock certificates that include the images of popular cartoon characters such as Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and Bambi. Starting Oct. 16, the company will only issue shares digitally. PHOTOS: Hollywood Backlot moments "Like hundreds of other companies, Disney will no longer be issuing paper stock certificates in an effort to create a more secure and efficient system," the company said in a statement.

SAN FRANCISCO -- Twitter just minted a billionaire -- at least on paper. Evan Williams, the 41-year-old co-founder of Twitter, owns 12% of the social media company that is expected to go public next month, according to a filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission on Thursday. Twitter has been valued on the secondary markets at about $9.4 billion, making Williams' stake worth more than $1.1 billion. Forbes is estimating Williams, Twitter's largest individual shareholder, may be worth closer to $1.4 billion based on current valuations.

Lane Kiffin was never the long-term solution for USC football. He was an eleventh-hour poker play in 2010 by former athletic director Mike Garrett, a desperate short-term move to save a program from the NCAA sanctions that were about to be handed down under Garrett's arrogant watch. Garrett fooled us all by hiring a coach under NCAA investigation at Tennessee to a school going on NCAA probation. How brilliantly sinister! Never mind Kiffin lacked the credentials or the pedigree, he was a not-too-distant member of Pete Carroll's old glory guard.

WASHINGTON - The Obama administration, facing glitches in necessary computer systems, is delaying two online tools supposed to go live Tuesday for enrolling Americans in insurance under the president's health law. California is unaffected by the delay. But small businesses in some states that want to sign up their employees for health coverage on new federally run marketplaces created by the Affordable Care Act will have to use paper forms until November, according to administration officials.

About 100 pounds of marijuana hidden underneath clothes in checked baggage and covered in birthday wrapping paper was seized at Los Angeles International Airport on Wednesday morning. The pot has an estimated street value of about $300,000, according to the Transportation Security Administration. At 5:15 a.m., officials at one of the terminals "reported four suitcases full of marijuana were discovered," according to a statement from TSA Public Affairs Manager Nico Melendez. The marijuana was wrapped in green cellophane and covered with birthday wrapping paper, Melendez said. The bags belonged to two different passengers on a flight bound for Atlanta. The passengers did not board the flight and have not been found, the TSA said.

It was a game within a game for the Denver Broncos offense -- and Peyton Manning didn't even know about it. The trio of Broncos running backs were feeling so comfortable in Monday night's 37-21 victory over Oakland, they played a game of rock, paper, scissors to decide who got to blast into the end zone for a one-yard touchdown. "We were just messing around on the sideline," running back Ronnie Hillman explained. "Just something to do. Have fun. " The play in question came in the fourth quarter after Hillman tore off a 19-yard run that looked to be a touchdown.

Popular stationery company Paper Source has changed hands, from Southern California private equity firm Brentwood Associates to investment management firm Investcorp. The financial terms of the deal were not disclosed. The Chicago-based chain, which sells paper goods, gifts and crafting supplies across 23 states and the District of Columbia, was founded in 1983. Brentwood contributed capital in 2007. Since then, Paper Source's store count has increased to 73 units from 21. Now, there are nearly 20 stores in California alone.

PHOENIX - At just 20 years of age, Carla Chavarria sits at the helm of a thriving graphic design business, launching branding and media campaigns for national organizations. Some of her projects are so large she has to hire staff. Still, Chavarria has to hop on buses to meet clients throughout Phoenix because Arizona won't give her a driver's license. The state considers her to be in the country illegally, even though she recently obtained a two-year reprieve from deportation under the Obama administration's deferred action program.

A Superior Court judge Friday refused to grant the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum Commission an emergency order demanding The Times and others surrender internal emails about its behind-the-scenes efforts to give USC control of the stadium. In the emails, commission officials discuss such topics as limiting public debate of a proposed USC lease of the taxpayer-owned Coliseum and excluding state officials from closed-door talks on the deal. The documents also show the panel's then-president and its top administrator tallying the commission's expected vote on the lease terms weeks before they were made public.