Donald Trump…Greasy

19Apr

Whooosh! Now youre Creepy Combover Guy!

And I’m not talking about the thinning strands of golden cotton candy hovering over his scalp. No, Donald Trump truly is trying to show the country that he’d fit in as a greasy, slimy, dishonest politician by saying some really stupid crap (while making that ridiculous face he always makes while firing people, like he just finished sneezing)

Thats the face.

First it was getting the Tea Partier birthers on his side by acting like he truly believes the bullshit about Obama not being born in the US. This topic has been beaten to death, is there really any sane person out there that still believes he’s not a US citizen? Politifact has gone to great lengths to gather all of the quotes from various figures regarding this topic and disproving them one-by-one. You can find their “guide to Obama’s birth certificate” here. Look, Donald’s on their twice. Better yet, look at his statement page on Politifact, granted he’s only been in the political spotlight long enough for them to gather six statements, but look how many of them are completely true, not a single one. This guy clearly should be running our country, he’s obviously got the lying thing down.

Second, he’s trying to get the Reagan loving conservatives on his side by saying that he really liked Ronald Reagan, here’s exactly what he said.

Well, I really like and knew a little bit of Ronald Reagan, and I really liked him. You know, not only his policies, smart guy and so much smarter, you know, I always sort of have to laugh to myself when people try and criticize that level of intelligence. And I loved his style. I loved what he represented. … I thought he represented something very special for this country.

Alright, well, I’m not here to agree or disagree with the words Mr. Trump had about his boyfriend but what I am here to show is that this is a complete 180 from what he felt of the man during his actual presidency. An excerpt from Trump’s best-selling book, “Art of the Deal,” on ThinkProgress.org had to say the following, written at the close of Reagan’s term.

Ronald Reagan is another example. He is so smooth and so effective a performer that he completely won over the American people. Only now, nearly seven years later, are people beginning to question whether there’s anything beneath that smile.

Ouch, in your face Reagan…hey wait a minute. I thought he was a “smart guy” and that you liked his policies. So here’s what it must be, you truly felt this way about Reagan back in the day, but you also know that Reagan was the conservative superhero that you can’t exactly go bad mouthing the guy now that you’re running as a Republican.

Here’s what I think, if Trump somehow manages to be elected as a President (God help this country if he does) I bet you’ll be able to replace “Ronald Reagan” in the book excerpt above with “Donald Trump” and it’ll still be relevant. Say what you want, that this is all propaganda designed to bring Trump down. But I highly doubt it, this stuff is too hilarious to be made up.

All I have to say, if he becomes President, is well…this will suffice…

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"They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying to get what they want … Well, we know what they want. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else... Good honest hard-working people continue to elect these rich cocksuckers who don’t give a fuck about you..." - George Carlin

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"If you want to see the true measure of a man, watch how he treats his inferiors, not his equals." -J.K. Rowling

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"Every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies...A theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed." - Dwight D. Eisenhower