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Topic: wiping your butt (Read 120932 times)

I got a poop stool, well i just found a stool in the garage. Anyway, it's really amazing, basically you shit like a dog and apparently that's the most healthy way of pooping because it just shoots right out. It really does shoot right out, as soon as I'm position on the stool and toilet seat, about 2 seconds later BOOM. A nice clean poop comes flying out of me and the wipe up job is a great improvement for me. I would use a half of a roll of toilet paper just for one shit and now, I'm finally 10 or less wipes person. I'm normal, finally!!!!!

i just got back from Paris and the toilets there are fucked up! the water is so deep in the bowl, my peen was semi submerged. Theres a motion sensor flush.. i did not know this and leaned forward for leverage, which set of the sensor, my wang got a swirly and I got a jump scare that ended up spraying piss over everything.. all in all a thrilling experience not for the faint of heart.

Apparently last Saturday I was so drunk that while I was puking all over my friend's bathroom, I asked him to leave so I could take a shit. He unlocks the bathroom and comes in to see me passed out on the bathroom floor with my pants around my ankles (slightly unrelated but it's also worth mentioning that he kept taking shots the entire time he was helping me). He woke me up and told me to wipe my ass and pull up my pants, to which I asked "why?" It took him five minutes to convince me to do it. I remember absolutely none of this.

when you're wiping your butt, and you check the tp, and are like, how the fuck did the poo get over on that part? i wasn't even wiping there .. so you scavenger around your side cheeks trying to find the culprit, but every time you check the tp, the poo keeps showing up in different areas .. so by the end, you know that no matter what, there is some poo hidin out that's gonna mark up your undies

Wiping your ass is an art.In my gym we have a dude that I train bjj and he always smells nice (some guys smell like bums,but I get paid ..fuck it)his butt tho, is always stinky as hell man!!When I teach him armbars and triangles and shit I am on the verge of puking my guts out! I get 30€ per hour,so I can't tell this stinky ass too fuck off so I delicately mentioned ass wiping tehniques! The dude told me that he wipes his cornhole with toilet paper and damn wet cleanex!! Now,wtf is he doing wrong???...ass wiping is an art! And I need to smell them for a living

After you finish pooping do you button your pants back up or wash your hands first? The thought of poop particles renting out property on my pants button/belt buckle make me uneasy. Although there's poop particles on practically everything everywhere all the time always, but I already have enough trouble sleeping at night so I try not to think about that.