Adventure isn't missing.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

One of my closest friends (and favorite people) is celebrating the launch of her company

The Constant Stylist!

THIS WEEKEND the party happens.

I will be there, in full support of my pal who is a serious source of inspiration, creativity and all things lovely. Constance has been a style mentor for me over the years, and most recently helped revamp and refresh my tired wardrobe.

I also got to dress up real purdy and get my photos taken for her business.

YOU can join in on the fun.

If you’re in the area, Eastside’s 425 Magazine is handling the marketing and has put together a social media contest which will allow the winner and a guest an exclusive VIP experience at the Constant Stylist launch party. You can still enter to win here 425magazine.com/new-year-new-you/ - only a few days left!

Saturday, September 26, 2015

"And I saw the deeds, the deeds of my own life, the smallest, most trivial things, I saw them suddenly in their seed and sprout and with their groping branches: I saw them growing, intertwining with other deeds, and those deeds come to form a thicket and a woodland and a great roving wilderness that dwarfed the world as we hold it on a map, the world as we hold it in our minds. Dear God, next to this, this endless spawning of deed from deed and word from word and thought from thought - the world is nothing. Every single soul is a world!"

Thursday, May 14, 2015

My little sister married the love of her life on a wooded beach cliff last weekend. I can't say I've attended a more meaningful, genuine wedding. A small group of their biggest fans and family came to support their love, and my husband officiated. I wish Heather and Jesse, and their son Oliver, all the blessing and love there is.

Monday, December 01, 2014

I took the bus home on the first day of Advent. In fact, I made the bus driver mad because I chased the bus. I was late to it, and he was impatient, but he let me on anyway.

As soon as I sat down, I was aware of the humanity around me. Me, late and hurried. Others, grateful to get out of the freezing temperature. The older man up front, confused, talking to himself. Hope. Loneliness. I think I felt all of it within me too.

I was looking forward to getting home to my family. But for that moment, I was just one of them, nobody special, in need of a bigger reason than myself.

This is my favorite Christmas-time song. I played it as I rode home, and let the story bring me to tears again. It's so predictable, every time I hear it. The drone of the bus hid my emotions, and I just sat there, so aware of Advent, and the coming of Christ to humanity. I prayed that I would not miss him this season, and that my imperfect life could possibly point to him.

Then tonight, I was readying Ann Voskamp's words on Advent..

"It is possible for you to miss it. To brush past it, to rush through it, to not see how it comes for you up over the edges of everything, quiet and unassuming and miraculous - how every page of the Word has been writing it, reaching for you, coming for you. And you could wake on Christmas only to grasp that you never took the whole of the Gift, the wide expanse of grace. So now we pause. Still. Ponder. Hush. Wait. Each day of Advent, He gives you the gift of time, so you have time to be still and wait."

Last year at this time, I was 9 months pregnant, waiting. I clearly remember that feeling of wonder. My baby boy was about to arrive. When would he come? Late? Early? I was so aware of every little change, every zinger of pain, every kick. I was taking it all in.

A few hours before he came, I had a conversation with a friend that was monumental. I didn't feel like I was ready to have him. And she called, somehow knowing I would need to talk. Thank God for friends who point the way. After tears and prayers, I hung up, and laid down to rest, at peace. At midnight, he decided it was time. And in my heart, I knew it was time.

All that led up to that moment was the waiting. And then suddenly, he was here. Less than three hours later, my world was changed. It was a gift to me that my son was born at this time of year, because I can't help but think of that story when I think of Advent.

For all of us, I pray for the grace to take it all in. To not take anything for granted. To experience life, unhidden, unhurried.

Thursday, June 05, 2014

Monday, April 07, 2014

We found ourselves together in an old house in a small town called High Hope.We didn't mind the quaking.Through me a tremble rose and I thought I might tear, but I hope.We gathered in the same room, but as the house shook and the ghosts looked in we moved.Through the ceiling I screamed at you.I said "These bonds are wearing thin. Can you get us through?"

- Wind, song 2 on Native. Dreamer. Kin.
(my favorite song of theirs)

Check 'em out on Noisetrade.
Thanks Kate, for sending their music my way.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

I was happy to learn John Mark McMillan came out with a new song, out front of a new album. I really like it. (Personally, I'm not a fan of watching people stand around singing other peoples songs - something about it feels weird, like I'm spying on them. So I like the song for what it is, but not so much the video.)

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

How do you put into words walking on the moon? Or summiting Everest? Or falling hopelessly in love? I'm not sure how to describe something so terrifying and exhilarating, so I'll start with the facts.

I'd been dilated 4cm the last few weeks of my pregnancy and my midwives said he was definitely coming early, and when he comes it will be quick.

Right on both guesses.

My contractions started around midnight on Friday the 13th. A short rush woke me up and I knew we'd be meeting our son soon. I was so ready to meet him! My state of mind was focused on getting through the contractions as they sped up. Around 1:30am my water broke at our apartment. My body instantly went into push mode. You could also call it Beast Mode - I'm sure our neighbors thought something very, very bad was happening if they heard me. This baby wanted to come out and I was sure if we didn't leave for the hospital RIGHT THEN I was going to have this baby on our bathroom floor.

From the start Jeff was amazing, helping me work through the contractions, reminding me to breathe, and somehow was able to get me into the car and to the hospital.

We made it to Evergreen by 2:10am. Let's just say I always pictured myself with a little more dignity than I had going on that night. I stepped into the lobby and I was immediately on my hands and knees, bearing down. You couldn't have paid me a million bucks to stop - this kid was ready to meet the world.

My incredible midwife Heather met us there and wheeled me down the hallway, got me in my room just in time, where I could start really pushing. Not surprisingly I was 10cm dilated. I pushed with all my might for about 30 minutes. I have to say this...I loved the pushing part. I love consciously working hard with my baby and my body to get him out.

At 2:51am he was born. 21" long, 7lbs, 5oz! Jeff caught him and put him on my chest. And my heart has never been the same.

day 3

And now my boy is almost two months old. I can't tell you how much I love him, because words don't ever suffice for something like this.

day 49

I am so, so grateful that his arrival was short and smooth. My heart breaks for my friends who have numerous complications and are left having to focus on the pain and healing, when they should have the joy of focusing on their new baby. But everyone has their own unique experience, and there really is no comparison. I'm just so grateful for ours. For some reason our little Lincoln came into the world this specific way. He came with so much insistence and peace at the same time. I like that about him. I also like that he was born at Christmas time. I like that he smiles when his dad laughs. I like that he is really social and aware. I like that he slept for 5 hours straight last night.

I'm also really grateful for our community of friends and family who have been so excited about his arrival, and really supportive of us. So many amazing gifts have been given, meals were brought, offers were given to babysit and care for him when we need a break, and everyone just loves him so much. We couldn't be richer. Lincoln has no idea how many people love him.

It's such a privilege to be a mother. It's slowly changing me in ways I didn't know it would. And so I pray for my family and my children and my house.

"Let those that are united to me in tender ties

be precious in thy sight and devoted to thy glory.

Sanctify and prosper my domestic devotion,

instruction, discipline, example,

that my house may be a nursery for heaven,

my church the garden of the Lord,

enriched with trees of righteousness of thy planting, for thy glory..."

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Friday, October 11, 2013

Actually, my 6-year old laptop is lame. It's toes up for now. We'll see if we can come up with a miracle. Heck, it's happened before.

For now, here's a TED Talk my husband sent me yesterday that may or may not have made me tear up. As far as I know, I will never go to art school, but I never want to lose the art of seeing life through the unexpected. His email said this: "The themes Alexa hits on and her ultimate thesis are reasons why I fell in love with your art and writings so many years ago."

That made me want to cry.

Girl gotta get on it.

Meanwhile, here's the TED Talk and a picture of me from last night. 31 weeks, people.

Friday, August 16, 2013

"The power of preserving silence is the very first requisite for all who wish to shine, or even please in discourse; and those who can not preserve it, have really no business to speak. ... The silence that, without any deferential air, listens with polite attention, is more flattering than compliments, and more frequently broken for the purpose of encouraging others to speak, than to display the listener's own powers. This is the really eloquent silence. It requires great genius - more perhaps than speaking - and few are gifted with the talent."

Monday, August 12, 2013

Thursday, August 08, 2013

Lately I've been reading Sheldon Vanauken. In "A Severe Mercy" he references the story of a Hebrew woman named Veronica, who supposedly wiped Jesus' brow while he was carrying his cross to Golgotha. I'd never heard of that before. And I can't stop reading this sonnet he wrote...

Wednesday, August 07, 2013

We had our 20 week ultrasound on Thursday. I woke up feeling more excited than a 6 year old at Christmas!! The plan was to see if he was healthy all-around and find out our little baby's gender, and find out if we were right. See, we thought it was a boy from the very beginning. Before we ever got pregnant, we referred to our first child as a "she"...but once we were actually expecting, without even trying or noticing, we started referring to him as a "he". Once we recognized this, we realized we both thought he was a boy, for reasons we don't really know. We just knew. Then I had a dream he was a boy. Either way, we would've been so happy, but we were soooo curious.

As you can see from the picture, he's definitely of the male gender. We could tell right away, and we all laughed and Jeff said "that's my boy." :) And my eyes may have filled with tears. I was in awe. I couldn't speak for the longest time.

The rest of the ultrasound was great. He has all 10 fingers and 10 toes. They measured his bones and checked out his kidneys and internal organs. He was doing this funny nose dive so the doc couldn't see his face, heart or brain for awhile. Kinda the most important parts. :) So they leaned me back really far on the bed, with my feet up in the air, hoping that gravity would make him change positions. He finally did, and everything looked great. He is a perfectly healthy baby boy, and we are so grateful.

Here's his sweet little face...

"As you know not what is the way of the wind, or how the spirit comes to the bones in the womb

of a pregnant woman, even so you know not the work of God who does all."

Ecclesiastes 11:5

I can't tell you how much joy I have thinking of our little son. Every time I get to hear his heartbeat or see his little body on the screen I am full of joy in a way I've never been before. I can only imagine what it will be like to meet him for the first time. I hope he's like Jeff. :)

He's 21 weeks along now, and I can feel him more and more every day. Last night my stomach looked like waves. I think it's his feet. Then he will push his head or butt up really far so I have this huge round knot sometimes. It cracks me up. I love that I can picture him in there now.

20 weeks

His name is Lincoln. Lincoln Kline. It's been Jeff's top choice for years, and I really like it. We decided on it for our 1st son before we were even married. It means "from the settlement on the lake"....which is just perfect, since we live on a lake. But I also like that when I think of his name, I think of freedom, perseverance, joy, compassion and tenacity. I've never known another Lincoln, and the only other context I have is Abraham Lincoln. Not a bad namesake. We're still working on his middle name. For some reason, that's harder for me.

So things are progressing nicely and I have loved being pregnant, so far. I have lots more energy than before, except that I get really winded walking up hills. Phew. One other fun thing is that I've been having restless leg syndrome at night. My legs feel like they are waking up from being asleep, like there's ants in them. It. drives. me. nuts. That's my only minor complaint. Well, that and having only 1 pair of pants that fit. (Yes, we broke down and bought me a pair of maternity pants. They're actually really cute.)

What I really love is that so many of my friends are pregnant right now, or just having babies. I can't wait to be initiated into that crew of awesome women! I can't wait to hang out with my sister, letting the cousins play together.

Speaking of Ollie...here's my newest, most awesome photo of him...

What a guy! And I get to be with him tonight!!

On that note, thanks for reading this long catch-up post and coming along with me on this journey of becoming a mom to little Linc. I am truly in awe.