The latest rumor is that the perennially stalled Six Million Dollar Man film has found its star in Mark Wahlberg. It's an unsourced, unconfirmed rumor, so it may mean nothing. Alternately, prepare for an onslaught of jokes about Wahlberg's clueless Transformer character reacting to the abilities of Steve Austin.

"I think I can run fast!"

We don't even know whether a Six Million Dollar Man is even close to being able to pick a star, given that Universal's been trying to adapt it forever, starting with a Kevin Smith script in the 90s. Then there was a Jim Carrey-starring comedian version kicking around. And, lastly, one with Leonardo DiCaprio as Steve Austin and with Bryan Singer directing.