Colbert schools scientists for naming newly discovered spider after wrong ‘Lord of the Rings’ character

Scientists in Brazil who discovered a new species of spider that they named the “Iandumoema smeagol,” got a fierce lesson in Lord of the Rings minutiae from Late Show host Stephen Colbert, a well-known LOTR aficionado.

Colbert was upset with the choice of names, saying the scientists should have known better than to name the spider after Smeagol.

“They named it Smeagol because it’s scary-looking and lives in caves. Okay, that’s cute. That’s cute. Got two problems with this,” Colbert explained before launching into an impressively detailed history of Smeagol’s past as a “Hobbit-like creature” who eventually becomes the scary-looking Gollum after discovering the ring while fishing and then murdered his cousin Déagol in a fit of rage.

“You should have named the spider Gollum. You don’t discover a venomous snake and name it Anakin; you name it Darth Vader,” a stern and mocking Colbert lectured.

According to Colbert, the scientists could have taken the easier path and named the newly discovered arachnid after a spider that is already in the Lord of The Rings: Shelob.

“The last offspring of Ungoliant, whose poison killed the Two Trees and who consumes light and vomits darkness. You know—spiders,” Colbert stated.

He then added, “I thought you guys were scientists. This is sad.”

Watch the video below from The Late Show:

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About the Author

Tom Boggioni is based in the quaint seaside community of Pacific Beach in less quaint San Diego. He writes about politics, media, culture, and other annoyances. Mostly he spends his days at the beach gazing at the horizon waiting for the end of the world, or the sun to go down. Whichever comes first.