Wednesday, March 25, 2015

I had a pretty vivid daydream while working out this morning, which might mean that I was losing bloodflow to my brain; I'm not sure. It was a TV advertisement.

The commercial starts inside a crowded airplane. A husband and wife are visibly uncomfortable. There is a crying baby nearby, and the woman winces.

The scene changes to the exit gate, where we see that the woman is very clearly pregnant, about to burst. She hobbles along with her bag and her husband through rows of Christmas trees and garlands. There are also menorahs and Stars of David.

They pick up rental car keys and now they're on the freeway, and you see a large sign that says "Jerusalem" in the distance at the airport they left. Suddenly they're stuck in awful city traffic, not going anywhere, and then someone passes them very slowly, on a camel, Office Space-style. The woman grunts and sighs.

They pull their bags into a hotel lobby, and they both finally look relieved. The desk attendant presses a few keys and "I'm sorry, but I don't seem to see your reservation..." The couple stare at each other incredulously. The woman's eye twitches. "...but we do have one room left, in the stables—er, garage." The man opens his mouth to speak but the woman interrupts him and says "uh-uhh, no wi-fi." She turns her back to the desk attendant, pulls out her phone, taps a few buttons, and the text RESERVED appears on the screen. She briefly turns her head to the desk attendant with a snarky "go screw yourself" look, and then the two of them rapidly leave.

The couple are now relaxing in a spacious hotel room, while an announcer says "Instant, confirmed reservations. Another reason to book every room through Hotels.com." Through the hotel's window you can see a bright star, and near the couple's suitcases you can see three nicely-wrapped gifts.

Friday, March 13, 2015

Stuff I've been listening to lately. Nothing's stand-out awesome, but there's definitely some good, solid stuff sandwiched between the mediocre.

If you're into rock, though, just go get Imagine Dragons' latest album; I'm not even all the way through it yet and I know it's way better than anything on this list.

Charli XCX—SUCKER: 5/10
Highs: Gold Coins, Doing It featuring Rita Ora, Die Tonight
Well-produced pop music that would be better with a vocalist who doesn't sound like she really wished she had a punk band.

Kendrick Lamar—good kid, m.A.A.d city: 3/10
Highs: good kid, Now or Never featuring Mary J. Blige, The Recipe featuring Dr. Dre
Kendrick's a talented rapper but his voice gets on my nerves and the album isn't my style at all.