Lawrence Vickers had fire ants in his crotch

Cowboys fullback Lawrence Vickers had to temporarily leave practice on Wednesday because he had ants in his pants. Literally. Making matters even worse is that Vickers recently discovered he is seriously allergic to fire ants.

According to the Dallas Morning News, Vickers left the first hour of practice at Valley Ranch holding his right hand near his waist and headed to the locker room to be treated for fire ants.

“I was trying not to squeeze myself in front of women out there,” Vickers said. “I wanted to pull my pants down and run inside, but I couldn’t do that. When those ants get close to those testicles, there ain’t no laughing about that.”

No, that certainly isn’t a laughing matter. If fire ants can postpone a baseball game, I can only imagine what they would do to someone’s testicles.

And it would have been even worse for Vickers.

The fullback recently discovered he was allergic to fire ants after being stung by them while working out. His neck swelled and he began wheezing, so he began carrying an EpiPen around with him in case he ever had to treat himself for it.