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Friday, 31 December 2010

why wait.

2010 hasn't been the greatest year - overall I have pretty negative feelings about it. I'm so happy to see the back of it. Every cloud has a silver lining though, and I feel like I've learnt quite a lot about myself and other people. I really do feel that, especially in the last few months, I've grown a little as a person.

The whole "New Year" thing is a totally foreign concept to me. There are all these expectations for New Year's Eve to be the "BEST TIME EVER!" and it never is. Generally, it's just like a regular night out, but 10000x busier (so you can NEVER get to the bar) and you have to pay to get in everywhere! Even pubs!!! Everyone is on a mission to get completely off their faces and everyone scrambles to find someone to kiss at midnight. I had plans to go to a couple of parties in my village, but since I've fallen ill it looks like I'll be staying in! I don't mind too much though - I stayed in last year too (which did not impress the boyfriend I had at the time, but oh well!)

Then there's resolutions - if there's something you don't like about yourself or your life, why wait until January 1st to do something about it? The first day of your new life can start whenever you choose.

Saying that, here are my life (not New Year's) resolutions!

I am very guilty of putting things off and just hoping they'll get done/better on their own. They almost never do. From now on I want to be active in making my life better, creating goals and working towards a bright future.

(the one I always have and break within the first week, if not sooner) healthier food, more exercise, and healthier in the brainbox too.

"I'd rather live my life in regret than not take part in it." - Every Time I Die. I will be getting help with my anxiety - learning to think differently about myself and the world.

Make them feel special. Spend lots of time with people I love, and who I know love me. Don't bother trying with people who can't be bothered with you. It just makes you feel worthless and drained.

Ideally, I'd like to live in a city for a few years while I'm young and finding my niche. I like the idea of smaller, fun cities like Brighton or Bristol. I used to live in Bristol and I don't really want to move back now, but somewhere like that. Any ideas? But, until then I'd love to find a nice little place for me and Kayley.

Even if it's just places in the UK, I need to explore. I've already made vague plans to visit a friend in Brighton, and one of my best girls who is going to live in her hometown of Berlin for a while. VERY excited.

I want to be incredible at everything I do, and when I'm not, I end up beating myself up about it, instead of bettering myself. I want to find courses to aid me in getting better at the things I am passionate about. Dressmaking is very high up that list.

I've been batting this idea around for a little while, but once I've built up some stock (and my skills) I am going to start selling. I'm not entirely sure what I will be selling yet, but there will be an eclectic mix I'm sure! I'm pretty excited about it, I just need a little help and a little push. If there's anything you'd particularly like to see in my shop, let me know!

I find myself writing more than drawing these days. But when I do draw, I think "why don't I do this more often?" - the same with painting. More books will be made. Perhaps a zine or two. Collabs?

No explanation needed :)

A wise and brilliant man once said to me, "Honestly, my life being as it is right now has made me realise that the world is so fucking malleable. You can do whatever you want - all you need is realism and determination. I just feel like so many people miss out on so much because they don't realise that life is out there and you can just fucking take it."

very excited about the prospect of you opening a shop! that snood you knitted looks amazing and the t-shirts you made are so cute! they remind me of devendra banhart a bit (which is definitely a good thing) - I would definitely buy things :)

New Year's is completely underwhelming, I never really celebrate it other than with some drinks and biscuits at home aha (: My family celebrate Chinese New Year instead, so everything is business as usual at home right now! Your life resolutions all sound really good, totally inspiring me to do something new next year! Hope you feel better soon Lyzi, and Happy New Year xxxx

I completely agree about NYE, Im old before my time I think. Some great, realistic goals there! I think you should move to Brighton, mainly because I live near there! But also, after reading your blog, I can imagine you loving it!