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Author
Topic: Just came back from Doc (Read 2962 times)

Hi everyone. I'm new to the forum. I went to doc today to get latest results. All is well. My t-cells have gone up to 550, the highest they have ever been since I was diagnosed and I remain undetectable. As happy I am with this news, I still feel sadness because I have this thing to begin with. Although I have had such a easy ride with the virus I still have trouble facing the reality that I have HIV and that it is potentially fatal. I don't know what is worse, the physical toll HIV can take on, or the emotinal one?

.......what is worse, the physical toll HIV can take on , or the emotional one? WELL the good news , it that there is no separation between the two, it comes gift wrapped, you need to accept the whole thing. ONLY TIME will heal, meanwhile , be kind to yourself, love yourself more, take more care of yourself, maybe it could the message that HIV is bringing to you.

Let's be clear, HIV SUCKS.............BIG TIME. All of our fears are valid, because they are ours. We have good days and bad days, days where we don't even think about HIV and others when that is all we can think about. We can lament til the cows come home but we still have the damn virus, it SUCKS.

Personally, I do try to live WITH it and not let it control me, but there are days when it does get the best of me.....I think it is okay to have your own personal "pity party for one" when you need to...Just remember that after the party is over, life does go on.

Lisa

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"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves.."Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?"