More

I try to live in the moment. I take interest and mentally record events that I wish I had my camera for. Sometimes I like to share my impressions. Other times I savor them for myself. In other moments I feel like my greatest goal and joy is sharing. It is in this spirit, of the intangible, the inexpressable, (forgive my english, Sir Michael) that I write this post.

This is a time of great reflection and change. Between jobs, I have nothing more to enjoy than my art, my sweet dog Lukas, my wonderful retired friend Tim, and contemplating the future. How many people have such an opportunity? Unharried freedom to wake up and decide what your next step is. Between art, work, friends, roomies, family, how does one set a plan, make a future?

Patience.

I told myself, in this 8 days in San Francisco, you’ll laze away your afternoons by the beach, while away a verdant sunday at the drum circle. The reality was far different for your author. Far from the succulent moist quietude of the Pacific Northwest, all of San Francisco was a frenzy of heat, light, and confusion. Having spent the 8 days there in a hotel instead of a hostel, I thought I would be content to while away the afternoon with books of philosophy and takeout from mel’s.

Instead, as I sat in the sunny room some afternoons after coming back from a days’ adventure, I felt I would be wasting a beautiful sunny day in SF when I know my friends in Seattle are inside because of the rain and not because they may not have anything else in particular to do as was the case with your Author.

Its interesting because I don’t often find myself at a lack of things to do, but on this trip, I did not bring a bunch of paper work, since my film work requires most of my notes and materials handy, which are not easy to transport and pack.

I just bought along a bunch of books of varying types to read when the mood struck me, and kept an open mind.

After all, here I am again, in the city where my new life began. I have been back probably 5 times since leaving, but I was always in Mill Valley working, so I never got to spend a lot of time in the city or with my friends. But here I was, three years later, back where it all started. My new home.

At times I was simply happy to wander around. I tried to enjoy experiences rather give in to a strange impulse to photograph it for my blog. As a result, I cannot say that I have a ton of pictures. There is a lot of variety, and things I photographed were images that compelled me to record the experience.

These last pictures, taken here in Seattle this evening ,express, without words, how I feel. More on this forthcoming. Here is your author in various self portrait poses, posing, how she feels.

One things I have been contemplating, if you don’t mind a transcentdential tangent, is perception. Intention is so powerful, it is incredible. More and more it seems to me as if pessimism, defeat, hopelessness, is built on an unsure ground.

And the path, a zen way to realizing the future, to precipitating and experiencing, preparing and creating that way to the future, is in the here and now. In what we feel. In what we think. What difference is there between a world that is here and now, a world that you imagine, and a world that never was? a place where all possibilities exist? Does the future not spring from what we do today? Does the fruit not rise from the tree from which gives it light? Is anything possible if not imagined?

Death, darkness is an end. :Light is the only true way to eternity. Love shines and illuminates all the worlds, makes all things possible.