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There is a difference between a guide to holiday movies and holiday movie guide. The former is simply a tour of cloying Christmas-time flicks you know by heart and the latter is a battle plan, a plan of action, a roadmap to maximizing your entertainment during whatever vacation you have managed to squirrel away for these winter days. Let’s consider various scenarios to ensure you maximize your movie merriment.

Ty Burrell of the stunningly overrated TV show “Modern Family” has officially signed on to the sequel to The Muppets, presumably not as Miss Piggy’s new love interest. On the one hand, any time one of the people helping to make “Modern Family” the ongoing unfunny abomination that it is gets more work, I’m sad. On the other, this means that they really are moving forward on another Muppet outing. It’s the yin...

A quick preface before I eviscerate gifted director Joe Wright’s self-indulgent adaptation of genius playwright Tom Stoppard’s artifice-laden take on Leo Tolstoy’s classic Anna Karenina. I wrote a Master’s thesis on the influence 17th and 18th century female conduct books designed to codify feminine behavior had on the writing of Daniel Defoe’s satirical novel “Moll Flanders.” I don’t mention this just to make me...