Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Mother's Little Helper

Mother's Little Helper (Jagger/Richards)

What a drag it is getting old
"Kids are different today"
I hear ev'ry mother say
Mother needs something today to calm her down
And though she's not really ill
There's a little yellow pill
She goes running for the shelter of a mother's little helper
And it helps her on her way, gets her through her busy day

"Things are different today"
I hear ev'ry mother say
Cooking fresh food for a husband's just a drag
So she buys an instant cake and she burns her frozen steak
And goes running for the shelter of a mother's little helper
And two help her on her way, get her through her busy day

Doctor please, some more of these
Outside the door, she took four more
What a drag it is getting old

"Men just aren't the same today"
I hear ev'ry mother say
They just don't appreciate that you get tired
They're so hard to satisfy, You can tranquilize your mind
So go running for the shelter of a mother's little helper
And four help you through the night, help to minimize your plight

Doctor please, some more of these
Outside the door, she took four more
What a drag it is getting old

"Life's just much too hard today,"
I hear ev'ry mother say
The pursuit of happiness just seems a bore
And if you take more of those, you will get an overdose
No more running for the shelter of a mother's little helper
They just helped you on your way, through your busy dying day

Recently I took the gigantic step of asking for help in the sanity department. I've been putting it off for months and even attempted to do some Yoga and take some B Stress Complex to help combat my anxiety and it just wasn't cutting it. On New Year's Eve, we were all sitting down for dinner and I had a panic attack. You see, this panic attack was completely unwarranted and I knew of no trigger at that moment of time. It scared me and I took it as a sign that I needed some professional help.

I've had anxiety my entire life, I am a worrier and I've come to accept that. However, my worries have escalated to ridiculous heights and I just can't live like that. My fears over silly things haunt me each night and while I'm embarrassed to admit it, it's true and I need to accept it.

The first thing I tackled this new year was calling the doctor. The nice man on the phone administered the anxiety quiz, with a 4 or 5 being normal and anything above that (up to 21) was considered to be an anxiety disorder. I scored a 19. Yep, I almost had a perfect score! Nothing to be proud of I know, but at that moment I knew I took the right step. I kept my appointment and the Dr. was certain I needed some chemical help so he prescribed Zoloft. I was told to give it 2 weeks but boy, do I feel better already. My patience level is normalized, I no longer have horrible thoughts late at night about bad things happening, I smile more, I'm calmer and overall I'm a happier person.

My aunt told me about the Rolling Stones Song, Mother's Little Helper and I immediately knew that song was meant for me. No more hiding behind a fake smile and no more pretending that I'm ok. This is something that I can't help, it's a chemical imbalance in my brain and I need the medication to stabilize those chemicals and that is ok. I'm not ashamed and I'm here today to share my story with you so that you know that it's ok to ask for help.

Being a woman is tough work. We already have to deal with hormones, but the pressures that exist in society of how to act, how to look, how to raise our children make it that much more difficult. Add on top of that the stress that comes along with having a job, children, family commitments can just become too much. If this isn't you, don't judge, just offer a kind word. If this is you, know you aren't alone.

Very true Michelle. I knew I needed help..I am a different person than I was just a month ago...I needed help and I got it. This post put tears in my eyes. I love you and thank you for everything you have done for me. You are the best sister anyone could ask for.

Bravo to you Michelle for getting help! Nothing to be ashamed of. I also have issues with anxiety and it can be a nasty thing. Panic attacks are horrible and no one should have to live with them! Those little pills do wonders though :)

I am so proud of you for recognizing that you needed help, for getting it, and for sharing your experience with others! I had no idea how hard motherhood was going to be and the toll that it was going to take on me - and I wish I had known sooner because I feel like I lost time with C.ooper in the beginning just trying to keep myself together. Way to go, Momma!

I finally quit trying vitamins and yoga and every other home remedy for my sadness in Feb. last year after two years of being a really miserable person. Two weeks on Lexipro and I was a better person, a better mother and a better wife. And for that, I refuse to ever be ashamed. Worse, I think, is making everyone around you miserable because you are too stubborn to ask for help. Kudos to you for doing and for having the guts to own up to it!

Right there with you Michelle. Thank you for sharing. My hubby says I need to go off the pills I'm on, however I told him I'm not ready. I get the anxiety and also still the PPD. Having kids TOTALLY changes everything and to top it off switching from working and socializing every single day to being a SAHM is just as big of a change. Still learning how to cope with that almost a year later.