#3 I am easily the best blogger in the entire Eve blogosphere. I might not get the most traffic, I might not make the most posts and I might have some trouble grasping the Engrish language but I am still the king. Like a diamond in a giant pile of dinosaur crap. Like a clouds silver lining. Like that 15 seconds of pleasure you get before the weeks of deep depression after boning a really fat chick when you were really drunk the other night. I am the shining beacon and ray of light that the Eve community needs and requires to function adequately. Without me there is only shit. You are all welcome.

PeeVeeEeeeeeeeeee...

One thing that you notice when living in a certain races space is that the ships flown nearby are usually skewed towards their makes and models. When I lived in Minmitar space, I saw so many Rifters and Ruptures and Hurricanes that I began to see them in my sleep. Now, living in Caldari space is considerably less scary as engaging a Merlin, Caracal or Drake is usually much more predictable and easy to handle. Check our killboards Top 10 stats and you'll notice that in our corp's brief existance so far, we have already destroyed 36 Drakes, 27 Caracals and 21 Cormorants, easily putting Caldari ships way at the top.

So with practiced speed and effeciency, we probed down and destroyed yet another Drake yesterday right as he was finishing the room. We got a nice kill, picked up some decent loot and were about to vacate the site when our target queried us:

[15:40:22] rcomm > lol[15:40:45] rcomm > could u at least tell me what was in the command center?

Hmm... maybe something valuable was left behind for us to nab? We engaged the large celestial object and upon its destruction were greeted with a large popup message in the middle of our viewscreens. Some NPC dude wanted us to go assassinate some other NPC ships for... wait for it...

It was quickly explained to us by our Missioning/PvE carebear expert Andrea Skye that we had stumbled upon an escalating set of exploration missions that could potentially result in a huge reward. After a bunch of poking and prodding, us hardcore pirates finally agreed to give this PvE content a shot. I tried my best to justify these missions as part of the loot that the Drake gave us and because the potential reward would go towards PvP ships but I still felt dirty. Even worse was that we decided to bring T1 cruisers with shield tanks and an Osprey to remote shield boost. This was fine for the Caracal and Osprey in gang but I felt so incredibly WRONG in my shield tanked Vexor, sporting a Dual 150mm Railguns, Large Shield Extender, Cap Recharger, Armor Repairer and a motley assortment of modules that might have made some sort of sense in our gang but would look absolutely horrendous if I was somehow killed and posted on a killboard. Fighting NPC's in this ship was risking my entire reputation in the universe as a badass mother.

We arrived at our first destination and easily finished the mission sporting only a battlecruisers and frigates. Our gang of Cruisers and frigates had no problem and we soon moved on to the next stop in lowsec where we were greeted with pretty much the same. Next, a third spot with again the SAME types of ships and in lowsec. The next step assigned was where things got ugly (even more-so than the Python Cartel doing missions is already ugly). An assignment in 0.0 and the only way in was there was jumps past two highsec systems. After a number of scouting mishaps, almost getting caught by a camp, and avoiding the faction police, we made it through to the appropriate system with all our ships alive! A miracle!

"One billion ISK, HERE WE COME!" I thought confidently as we started the next stage. Frigates, Cruisers and even a couple Battleships in this room... surely it would be a difficult fight against all odds where we would come out victorious and be rewarded huge. Imagine our dissapointment when it was almost no challenge and it proved to be a dead end. Several hours of effort, a horrible carebearing dirty feeling and all we were rewarded with was a dead end to the escalating mission chain and a couple faction items worth around 100 million ISK combined. After all bounties and loots were totalled, only around 20 million ISK per pilot. Doh.

9 comments:

In your Vexor fittings, you said "Large Shield Extender, Cap Recharger, Armor Repairer". Do you have ANY IDEA how hard I cringed at you both shield and armor tanking a Vexor? Oh god I think I'm going to pod you.