Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Facebook Drama

**edited to add some more responses. the asterisks will divide the added portion from the original post.**

So, I signed on to FB and I saw that little number up in the top that means you have something in your inbox...don't you love that?! I totally do.Anyway. I open it up and see HER face staring at me. She sent me a message. This is what it said:

No need to have FIL do your dirty work. I am sure he has better things to do other than monitor me and cc you. I have deleted him from my friend list. By the way thank you so much for having your friends and family (whoever it was) send me those lovely texts...Not sure that I was aware that good mormon people talked that way....

I responded with this, because I did not know what the heck she was talking about at the time (I had just signed on):

Hi, um, I don't understand about FIL doing my dirty work. Didn't YOU seek out the friendship with him? I'm sorry if the text hurt your feelings. But you have to admit, what you are doing (being a homewrecker, adulterer, etc) is disgusting and by all standards wrong. As for the language. I am not sure what was said. I am assuming you were called a slut or something. Sorry about that. Obviously I have no control over my friend's language than I have over my husband's actions. ;)

I feel I need to interject here with an explanation that someone asked for her cell phone number. I gave it to that person in a weak moment. Then when Beloved decided (yes, as much as he doesn't see it, he decided) to go to LA after I explained that he wouldn't have a family to return to, I said, 'ok.' and that person used daughter's boyfriend's cell to text Shannon. (Incidentally, he's not LDS--not like THAT matters...I know a few people LDS or Non who could make Sailor's blush!) I wonder if he sent more after the first text was sent from the other person...?

Then I saw my FIL had emailed me with "oops" and then I went back to FB and saw his message there, which said that he was going to unfriend 'said person' but then thought about it and decided that since she sometimes posts stuff he'd just watch and see what she does. And if he has a conversation with her, he'd let me know what was said. So then I understood what she was talking about and sent her this:

Oh. I just saw the comment Dad put in response to my wall post. Now I understand. And you have misunderstood what he and I talked about. I didn't want him to un-friend you and I didn't want him to monitor you. I just wasn't sure what the nature of your relationship with him was, and that is what happened.Truly, I don't want to spy on you. I don't even have any malice toward you. Others, now...that I cannot account for. As you, apparently, can attest to (the text you received).But YOU--I pray for. YOU I hope find peace. And of course I pray for the same for my husband. GigiLet her go on about what a b*&#$ I am.Let her do whatever.

I know who I am.

**************************************************This is what I found upon opening FB again:

I knew this day would come and I refuse to get into a verbal war with you. I don't have the time or the interest. I don't make decisions for Beloved nor do I have control over his actions. As far as the name calling...it's merely name calling. But, you in fact gave them my number for reasons only to harass me....You should have just text me yourself or better yet called me. I know what kind of person I am and I don't have problems sleeping at night. It's too bad actually, you will never get the chance to know ME for who I am and I will never get the opportunity to know YOU for who you are. I do feel that we both are good people and life has not turned out the way we had planned for it to. Funny thing is...I might could have actually got along with you had we met under different circumstances....Are you truly sorry for your sister calling me a diseased cunt, dirty whore and that I will rot in hell? I can't imagine you are so please don't apologize for something that you don't mean.This will be the last time you hear from me. You can send all the texts, chats, etc. that you need to in order to make yourself feel better. They really don't phase me...Good Bye! :)Now. I Know I probably should have just ignored that, but this is what I wrote.Just remember. I didn't contact you. You contacted me. I'm not in for a war of any kind.And yes, that was a disgusting thing to call you. I am sorry for it. I am glad we will have no further contact. And if you can sleep at night, that is good. Still praying for you.GigiI don't understand how she thought I was in for a 'verbal fight'. I thought my response was honest and kind.

Another weird thing: I felt like I had read that letter before. Especially the whole 'we could have been friends under different circumstances' and 'you don't know the real me' parts. But it was just, icky deja vu.

9 comments:

She can't believe you would really be sorry about the stuff said about her, because she wouldn't be sorry and isn't sorry about the stuff she hears about you I'm sure. Yikes. Could she be getting any more high school?

Wow. I don't understand where you are finding all of these reserves of good-person-ness. This woman She is sleeping with your husband and she expects you to just - I don't know - smile and sing primary songs? She wants people to be NICE to her?

She's evil. Her actions are evil. Your husband's actions are evil. People (your friends and family) recognize them for what they are and are responding to that. How on earth can she expect you to just - say nothing, do nothing. She and your husband are ruining you and your kids lives and you're supposed to just TAKE it?

Ugh. Ugh, ugh, ugh. You are a far, far better person than I. (Or anyone else I know, for that matter.)

I'm with Cameo on this one! When I read your post I was picturing myself in that situation and...let's just say it wasn't pretty! lol You have far more grace and eloquence and are sooooo stinkin' nice to this....don't know what to call her...Shannon. She disgraces the title of a woman. I like your big sis description of her. A bit more fitting than a woman. And I hate referring to her as Beloved's girlfriend. Just for kicks you should try and call Dr. Laura with Beloved on the line as well. I bet she would give him an earful. Might be a bit eye opening for him. Just a thought.

I am big sis, I am not the least bit sorry for speaking my mind, and if you remember, I found her phone number on my own, you just confirmed it. Don't apologize for my actions sister, that is not right, don't be sorry if she was hurt. who cares if she was hurt,..... nobody! She just better PRAY i am never face to face with her.

summary...your family is sticking up for you, don't apologize for them, be proud of them! they love you, and she deserves it. who cares about her feelings when she brought this on herself and invaded YOUR life and family, and she never cared about your feelings or those of your children.

Be ANGRY at her bringing her filth into your life like Jesus was at the moneylenders filthying up a house of G-d. She has no right to lecture your family on how to be a Mormon when she doesn't know anything about G-dly living. Give me a break! how DARE she!!!

About Me

15 months ago my husband told me he was in love with another woman. I was completely blindsided. I would have told you the day before that I was married to my best friend and soul mate.
Almost a year ago Beloved came home. We are working through this mess.
Why am I keeping this journal? Because I don't know how else to think through everything without driving myself crazy.
At least this way I feel like I am talking to someone.