Actually made it out last night to do some socializing, which really I don’t consider socializing in the technical sense of the term since I didn’t have an alcoholic beverage in my hand. But I did leave my apartment long enough to drop in at the kickoff cocktail party for the Vancouver International Burlesque Festival. I couldn’t resist—not because of the promise of lovely ladies in scandalous outfits, but because the party was so close to home, at a little Latin American restaurant called El Barrio that’s basically just down the street. Where I live, there’s not a lot happening, except for the crowds that gather around the latest crystal meth lab explosion.

I lasted barely half an hour, though, in the presence of all those good-looking drinks. In Gastown, Face of Today was having its first networking function. The idea behind the foundation, I was informed by board member Stanley Chiu, is to encourage young entrepreneurs, and also to help those in less developed parts of the world. Again, though, it was too much for me—servers kept coming around with trays of delicious-looking morsels (Nuba is a Lebanese restaurant), so I got out of there once I’d downed my chamomile tea. God, what I’d give for some of that fanstastic-looking humous right now. Slobber slobber.

Speaking of food, my last stop of the night was to see a band from Victoria called, of all things, MeatDraw. Now, this name has both benefits and drawbacks: first, it’s pretty funny, just because the whole idea of a meat draw sounds like something from pre-Industrial times. (I first encountered the phenomenon—you buy raffle tickets and win meat—at a Royal Canadian Legion, a veteran’s club, in the band’s hometown.) However, it’s also kind of a gross idea. Naturally, the band indulged in a few swine-flu related jokes—something about “Spamthrax”, if I recall.

Great band, though—lots of folk elements in the lyrics and four-part harmonies and ukulele, but it rocked hard too. More importantly, there were some unusual items over at the merch table. Besides playing trumpet, and singing with her duo Hank and Lily, MeatDraw member Lily Fawn is also a nutritionist. And so, along with the usual band T-shirts and CDs, she was offering some interesting products for sale: “Ice Queen Nipple Gel” and “Lilith Moon Personal Lube”, to name but two. Nothing to help me with my cleanse, though.