Dating Tips

Basic Tips for Speed Dating

The challenge that most guys face in a speed dating environment, is that they fail to set themselves apart from the other daters. Here are a few tips to help you stand out amongst the crowd:

1) Dress to Impress
Not all of us have Brad Pitt’s handsome features, but the good news is that we can significantly improve our level of attractiveness with nice clothes and careful grooming. We recommend you dress in business-casual attire – something that looks sharp, but isn’t too formal. A full suit may be a bit excessive, but a dress shirt with nice pants will do the trick. The key is to feel attractive in your outfit – it will naturally give you more confidence, which is a huge turn-on for most people.

2) Show Up Early to ‘Warm Up’
Athletes don’t jump into a game without warming up. Likewise, it can be beneficial if you ‘warm up’ by arriving at the venue a little bit early and socializing before going on your actual speed dates. Men, if you’re feeling shy about making small talk with women before the event, start chatting with the other dudes. It’ll help you loosen up and get in the zone. If you’re still feeling shy, you can always bring a friend to the event to make it a more comfortable experience.

Remember, the women will be sizing you up from the moment you walk in the door, so present yourself with an aura of confidence and approachability. If you stand in the corner by yourself before the event, people may think you’re an awkward loner. Conversely, if the women see you smiling and laughing with other people before the event, they’ll get the impression that you’re a confident person who is easy to talk to. This will put you at an advantage before even going on a single date!

3) Don’t Ask the Same Questions as Everyone Else!
This is the key element that will set yourself apart from the other speed daters. Here’s the mistake that 90% of guys will make on a speed date. They will begin by asking the SAME 2 QUESTIONS:

“So, what do you do for work?”

“What do you do for fun?”

DON’T
DO THIS!

Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with those 2 questions, however your conversation probably won’t be memorable if you only talk about jobs and hobbies. Over the course of the night, everyone will discuss those same 2 topics at least a dozen times! The Key is to STAND OUT and BE UNIQUE. Try questions like this:

“If you won the lottery, what are the first 3 things you’d buy with the money?”

“If your boss told you that you could be transferred to work in
any country in the world, where would you go?“

The key is to have a memorable, unique conversation. Remember, you only have 5 minutes on each date, so you can’t get into extremely detailed conversations. The most important thing is to convey a fun, interesting personality.

4) Keep the Conversation Light. Have Fun. Be Playful.
Speed dating is meant to be a fun event, so relax and don’t take things too seriously. If you’re too serious, you may come off as desperate or people may think you’re trying too hard. Be sure to smile and convey a positive energy, because it will make the situation more comfortable for both of you. Don’t be afraid to tease your dates. It’ll help set you apart from most of the other guys who’ll be trying to impress them. The key is to do it in such a way that is playful, not insulting.

5) Don’t Be Awkward and Don’t Reveal Too Much Information
Avoid putting your date in an awkward position by asking her if she’s going to check ‘yes’ beside your name on her dating card. Unless you’ve built up an incredible connection with her, it will likely create an uncomfortable situation. Have some patience and just wait until you receive your matches from the event organizer. Also, do not talk badly about other people at the event, because there’s a chance that one of them may be a friend of the person you’re on the speed date with. Plus, it’s just not in good taste! Refrain from talking extensively about past relationships and don’t inquire too much into your date’s personal life.

6) Take Notes… But Don’t Do it During the Date!
Since you’ll be meeting so many people in a short period of time, it may be helpful to write down some quick notes about each dater. This will help you remember specific details in case you match up with them and end up meeting after the event. But DON’T write down notes in the middle of the date – it can make the other person feel uncomfortable and think that they’re getting judged on everything they say. Wait until after the date, and scribble down a couple notes before heading to next table.

7) Stay Afterwards and Chat
If you’ve made a particularly strong connection with someone, feel free to stay after the event and continue chatting. Having a drink and talking to someone at the end of the night will help build a stronger connection and could essentially turn into an instant first date.

8) Contact Your Matches After the Event
After the event is over, you will typically receive an email with your matches within 24 hours. We recommend sending an email to your favourite match right away and suggesting a meet up for a quick drink or dessert. Keep in mind that your match may be receiving several messages from other guys at the same time, so don’t get upset if she doesn’t reply right away (or if at all). If you don’t get a reply, she’s probably not interested – don’t pursue her any further and move on to someone else. It may take a few events before you really get the hang of things, so don’t be discouraged if you don’t have immediate success.