And finally: Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has an important new mission: helping Rep. Don Manzullo (R-IL) get U.S. gefilte fish to Israel in time for Passover, even though the country has “imposed a 120% duty on imported gefilte, drying up the market.”

Even though Bubbe Mary was a rogue capitalist, she dropped every spare dime and quarter into a blue and white tin charity box that she kept in her pantry, right next to the jars of gefilte fish and red beet horseradish.