I’ve watched on the sidelines as we’ve journeyed with Charlie Sheen over the last few months of his life…watching his brand of ‘winning’ move us from trashed hotel rooms, to rambling internet broadcasts and now to the live stage in front of packed audiences and standing ovations.

Frankly I’ve been fascinated with the rest of America about Sheen’s ‘winning.’

‘Winning’ ala Charlie looks like getting fired from your job, losing your kids, and being in ‘committed relationships‘ with goddesses. Hmmm… If I lost my job, my husband and my children, I wouldn’t feel like a winner.

Winning now seems to be the ability to take pieces of ourselves, brand those pieces, and then show them off to the world. In other words, I can take my public side, or my business side, or my mothering side, or my social side; the side I am winning in, and polish that up, brand it however I want, then show it off to the world. And call myself a winner.

And the world will watch, weigh-in, boo or applaud, as I prove to them I’m ‘winning.’

Frankly, I’ve done that. Maybe you have too.

Yes I admit that at times, I have only focused on those aspects of my life that were ‘winning.’ In my own attempts to put spin control on the uncontrollable areas of my life, I’ve simply polished up my career-side, and shown that; or my physical side, and shown that. I’ve had times in my life in which only one area was working, barely and to keep sane, or stay alive, I showed that ‘winning’ side to the world.

Humans want to win. That’s a common bond we all share. But I’ve since learned that true winning is a holistic experience. It’s being, not performing. It’s authentic, not toured around the country.

Winning looks like being in healthy relationships and being financially solvent. It’s being emotionally and spiritually grounded. Winning is being employed, having a career we enjoy and being healthy physically. But most importantly it’s being content with our own value and worth apart from needing to prove our worth to others in extravagant, dramatic ways. Winning is being the same, inside and out; authentic, TRANSPARENT, and real. It’s saying to the world, this is who I am, ALL of me, in every area.

And true winning is taking personal responsibility and ownership of our lives by being honest and admitting when we don’t have it all together. Then it’s being brave enough to take a ‘time-out’ to regroup and regain our equilibrium.

That’s winning, really.

I think it’s time to stop gawking at Sheen’s ‘winning’ and start looking at our own ‘winning…duh?’ for real. This is one woman’s perspective. What do you think? Let me know: FACEBOOK, TWITTER, WEBSITE.