UGH. Why do I have to have emotions?!

Quoting ~*~Conor & Amee~*~:" No i understand where ur coming from. My ex and i never talked, didnt ever spend any time together and ... [snip!] ... the karma seaking b***h either. I believe each deserves what they give to others and over time good things come to good people."

For someone to hold something against you for 5 years is just crazy... He told me I'm never going to trust him so he's not gonna try. I told him what NOT to do (like talking to ex's, having passwords, or even the secrete stash of naked photos of every girl he ever screwed), but he loved those things more than me.
All he ever told me was "why can't you just get over it so we can be happy"... but he never aknowledged that he needed to change. He never even aknowledged that I even had a right to my anger. But there were far too, too, too many things that he did wrong to just "get over it".... it's not possible. Me trying to get over it and ignore it is what made me drink. I lost my son, then he came back in to my life just to further f**k it up. I think I have a lot of guilt over the way I lived the last few years so I just assumed I deserved it, even though I know I don't. Either way, he can suck it. lol

It's hard to get over something like that specially when they keep holding it against u like that. The guy that im with now makes comments towards other women but last night we talked about it and i said it normally doesnt bother me because ill go along with it but right now it does but im like huge pregnant. But i know 5 years is a long time to hold something like that over ur head but it takes time. In order for u to get over it he has to put in the effort to change his ways also. Both people need to work on how they can make it better and sometimes things just dont work out when only one person is putting in all of the effort 2 should be making.

Quoting ~*~Conor & Amee~*~:" It's hard to get over something like that specially when they keep holding it against u like that. The ... [snip!] ... make it better and sometimes things just dont work out when only one person is putting in all of the effort 2 should be making."

Yeah that's why we failed. I was the only person putting in effort. I wish I could make him be a better person because I know he hates himself too... but apparently he likes hating himself because he never changed from the time he was 19 to now. It sucks knowing my daughter has a tough future ahead of her with an a*****e as an example.... that's what upset me most....but I am just going to have to stick to my guns about my boundaries with the future men I date. She deserves a perfect father figure.

With my sons father he is a bad influence on him. hes mean to women and only thinks of himself. sometimes it seems like he doesnt even want to see his son. he sees him 2 days a week and on those days he waits until as late as he can to pick him up and wants to drop him off as early as possible. He told me that when my son is 13 years old if he wants to move in with him hes gonna do everything in his power to get him there and hes trying to be the best friend and the perfect parent so i look like the bad parent. Im honestly afraid that my son is gonna want to move in with him because hes gonna get away with not doing homework, smoking pot, drinking and doing whatever he wants when i dont believe he will be old enough to make those decisions. I know he has nothing against me in court and i have alot on him that i will pull out if i have to not that i want to but if it comes to it i will put the safety of my child first. My son looks to my boyfriend as his dad and i hope he doesnt get confused when hes growing up.

Quoting ~*~Conor & Amee~*~:" With my sons father he is a bad influence on him. hes mean to women and only thinks of himself. sometimes ... [snip!] ... the safety of my child first. My son looks to my boyfriend as his dad and i hope he doesnt get confused when hes growing up."

That's crazy... that's how it is with me to. Except he NEVER sees her. He took her one time but I had to drop her off and pick her up. Her bed time is 8-ish. He asked me to drop her off at 7:30 then had me pick her up at 11 so he saw her for 2 hours. I filed for full custody. He got pissed and said I'd never get it (which I will in about 2 more weeks). I do NOT want her around pot and around someone who condones poor behavior like drinking at a young age and all the stuff that goes with that.