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One of my biggest fears, besides eating mayonnaise, is my fear of needles. Want to see me turn white as a ghost – then show me a movie that shows a needle going into someone’s arm. Yeah, I’m a big sissy when it comes to needles, which is why it’s not a surprise that I barely made it through watching Amanda (Shawnee Smith) get shoved into that pile of syringes in Saw II.

Welcome to Monday Bloody Monday, where I am shoving you into the Youtube clip of that very scene. Say what you want to about the Saw franchise (it’s just torture porn, blah blah blah), some of the traps were very effective and well done. And sure, tossing a former drug addict into a pit of dirty needles is a bit sadistic, but when you watch a Saw movie you’re obviously looking for something sadistic. We all have a little Jigsaw in us after all, don’t we? Check out the clip below and I’ll be in the other room while you’re watching.

With the passing of Halloween this year, I came to a profound realization that I kind of missed the Saw movies. Personally, I’ll take those over the Paranormal Activity franchise as far as Halloween-time releases go, but unfortunately the last Saw movie in 2010 (Saw 3D: The Final Chapter) left a bad taste in my mouth. Luckily, I have 2009’s Saw VI to fall back on if I want my Jigsaw fix.

Make no mistake, I know these movies aren’t good. Sure, the first Saw film had the twist heard round the world – but after that, the franchise became a bit of a muddled mess. Which is why I was surprised that I enjoyed Saw VI as much as I did. Maybe because it dealt with the health care system and the slugs that run it. The joy of watching them get there comeuppance put a mild smile on my face. And contributing to that mild smile was the ‘WTF’ opening scene where two people have to cut off pounds of flesh from their bodies and try to outweigh each other’s flesh poundage to win the prize of not dying.

Even though this scene is more ridiculous than Taylor Swift trying to rap, it still gets an overall ‘Holy Shit!‘ response from me every time I watch it. It honestly makes you ponder what you would do in a situation where you have to chop off your arm so you could save your ass. Kudos to the girl for her facial expressions while she was hacking away at her appendage. She sure was determined and focused, and in life that’s all you can really ask for from a person. Now let’s end this post with an embarrassing pic of her that makes her look like she’s severely constipated.

I’m a sucker for tasty suckers. Especially if those suckers were used as promotional tools for a horror franchise that had five too many sequels. The joys of scouring Ebay have helped me hit pay dirt again my friends, as I’ve found a “rare” promotional lollipop for Saw VI!

That’s looks scrumptious. If you’re salivating like me right now at the thought of eating a sucker that looks like it’s straight out of a doctor’s office ‘Please Take One‘ basket, then I’m glad I’m not alone. Smack a couple Roman numerals on there and you’ve got something almost as magical as the actual Saw VI movie. And yes, someone is actually selling this fine promotional specimen for $13.13 on Ebay right HERE. So if you’re like me and would cut off your left arm to get this candy goodness, then head over there now! Sorry, I had to use that last line so the picture below would work. Sometimes comedy doesn’t come easy.