Parental involvement, communication key to surviving freshman year

One local parent and a couple of educators give advice for a smooth transition into high school

Lisa Holland was nervous when her son Michael started his freshman year at Bethel High School last year. She said she was concerned he'd have a difficult time adjusting because he'd be among older students and more than four times the number of kids than in middle school.

"Not knowing how he would be accepted by the older kids, I was worried about that," said Holland, of Hampton.

But she said it took him just a week to get used to navigating the new building, and making friends wasn't a challenge. While he was among different students than from middle school, he reconnected with others he hadn't seen since fifth grade.

"He actually adjusted a lot better than I expected," she said. "It was nice that he reconnected with so many kids from elementary school."

Local educators said it's normal for parents to be concerned about their child adjusting to their freshman year in high school. But they said parental participation can help make the transition easier, and it's vital for academic success.

"The parent involvement piece is really the key component," said Jennifer Markham, college and career coach at Hampton High School who coordinates a summer bridge program for incoming freshman.

Markham said the greatest challenge she sees is that sometimes students have a difficult time learning to balance a larger homework load and altering their study habits.

"I think for a lot of freshman, that's a major adjustment in their life," she said.

Markham said parents can help by keeping track of their child's workload and talking to them about what's going on at school.

"Be involved, encourage that dialogue with your child," she said.

Michelle Banks, assistant principal of instruction at Menchville High School in Newport News, said it's also important for parents to communicate with their child's teacher, but she said some might be intimidated if they've had a bad past experience. She said she hopes parents will realize school staff share their goals for their child's success.

"We're here to support the students and parents in every way possible," she said.

Banks said it's also important for students to seek out a trusted adult at school, such as a teacher, counselor or principal.

"The more adults you have with the kids, the better off they will be," she said.

It's also important for students to join clubs, sports or other activities, they said, because it introduces them to something new and can help with social adjustment.

Lisa Holland said when she first visited her son's school, she was surprised to learn about the variety of activities offered for students, even though she'd already participated in the PTA.

"I was just in awe that this high school had so much going on," she said.

Holland said as she's working to prepare Michael for his future, she's learning extra-curricular activities could give him an edge when he applies for college.

But she said the most important advice she can pass on to parents is to remember to take a breath and cherish the time, because it will be done before they know it.

"Freshman year goes by too quick," she said. "Really try to treasure every moment you have with them."