Are you still wasting time on sibling rivalry?

You may always have been convinced that your brother or sister got more attention, love and money than you did. Now that you are all adults, you still find yourself now and then seething with old resentments. Is sibling rivalry ruining your life?

Your sister earns a lot less than you do and has recently got divorced. Your parents have given her R10 000 to tide her over.

a) You are glad they could help and give her a call to hear if there is anything you can do.b) You feel that this again proves that they care more for her than for you and you retreat in bitter resentment.c) You phone them and demand that they give you R10 000 too.

Your brother's child has recently been chosen for the swimming team.

a) You send a card of congratulation, but avoid them for a while in case your children might feel inadequate.b) You phone and ask to speak to your niece so that you can congratulate her in person and invite her in for a milkshakec) You make no contact and become more draconian in your efforts to change your own child into a sports star.

Your brother has just bought a wonderful new Hi-Fi system

a) You rush out and buy a smiliar one yourself, even if it means bankrupting yourself.b) You secretly resent that he has the money to do this and don't call for a while.c) You buy him a new CD for his birthday and go and see the Hi-Fi system

You live in Australia and your parents are coming to visit you for Christmas

a) You are delighted and only wish your brother and sister could be there too.b) Your siblings are moaning at your parents about the money that this visit is going to cost them.c) You urge your parents not to tell the others how much this holiday is costing them.

Your beautiful and talented sister has just had her boyfriend walk out on her for another woman.

a) You rush around there with chocolates and tissues.b) You wait three days and give her a sympathy call.c) You are secretly happy as she has always got everything she wanted and this might be a reality check for her.

Your widowed mother has to have a small operation and needs to be cared for afterwards for about a week.

a) You choose that week to go to the coast for your holiday as you feel you have really done enough already.b) You offer to do it all in martyr-like fashionc) You call everyone together and split the week equally amongst the lot of you.

Your godmother gives you enough money to pay for an overseas plane ticket.

a) You keep quiet as you are scared it might cause a jealous outburst.b) You phone your sister so you can go and celebrate.c) You tell your siblings, but only because you fear the flying debris if they were to find out by chance.

It's your sister's turn to host the Christmas lunch this year. A week beforehand she phones to say she has won a week's holiday in the Maldives, but she has to go over Christmas.

a) You say it's not your problem and hell would freeze over before you hosted it again at your place.b) you suggest that she pays for everyone to go to a restaurant, or at least foot the foodbill for the event at your house.c) You celebrate with her and offer to host the Christmas lunch - but remind her that the next two years will be her turn.

You find yourself in a financial crisis and need an urgent loan.

a) You ask one of your siblings to sign surety for a bank loan.b) You would rather sleep in a nights helter or go to a loan shark than let on you have finacial problems.c) You phone your brother or sister, ask them for a loan and make an arrangement to pay them back.

Your sister, who is a lawyer, was asked by your mother to help her draw up a will.

a) You are sure she will split everything fairly as that is the way things happen in your family.b) You hire a private investigator to try and find out what it says, as you somehow always feel shortchanged in these matters.c) You change your will disinheriting the lot of them, as it is something you have been meaning to do for a long time.

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