Auction House Claims It’s Selling a Vial of Ronald Reagan’s Blood

Perhaps in a future post-apocalyptic America, this will be a holy relic. Remember ask yourself, “WWRD”? As Greogory Katz reports in the Associated Press:

A Channel Islands auction house says it’s selling a vial that allegedly contains blood residue from Ronald Reagan — a move denounced Tuesday by the late U.S. president’s family and his foundation.

The vial being auctioned online was used by the laboratory that tested Reagan’s blood when he was hospitalized after a 1981 assassination attempt in Washington, the PFCAuctions house said.

Reagan’s son Michael condemned the auction but said he was confident it was not his father’s blood.

“Whatever’s in the vial — could be mouse blood — it’s certainly not Reagan blood,” Reagan said in a telephone call from Los Angeles. “And what an outrageous thing to do to (Reagan’s widow) Nancy and the family. I hope the world calls on this organization to cease and desist because it’s so bogus.”…

I have a few gallon jugs of Ronnie’s urine sittin’ ’round the back shed, should any of y’all Randanista fanboys out there care to send in a certified money order and return address.

Nunzio X

Please offer video proof of the urine’s provenance.

Actual Reagan Urine, if applied to the skin in quantities as small as a nanogram, is known to blacken the hair as if dyed and cause the victim to begin muttering “Well, Nancy I and think….” incoherently, over and over.

If it checks out, I’ll buy a gallon and invite George W. and Dick C. over for a “lemonade.”

http://www.ContraControl.com/ Zenc

Imagine how bad this could be if a group of Right-Wing terrorists buy this and embark on a wholesale cloning project…

At first just whispered rumors that Reagan didn’t really die, that he’s working the midnight shift at a Michigan gas station – no, no, – a Jelly Bean factory in California.

Then grainy youtube clips of a brown-suited man shouting at walls and trying to export weapons to Iran…

Finally, a veritable army of glib, folksy, teflon skinned replicants descending on us… invading our schools, business, and homes with crews of union busting government service contractors paid for by “borrow and spend” fiscal policies…

Nunzio X

They had to store the blood in a special container made of depleted uranium; the blood burned right through a thick glass jar.

Arch con-servative Micheal Reagan says it could be mouse blood. If is Reagan’s blood that’d be a close guess since he was a rat dick with that silly “conservative” movement bullshit. Conservative whatever. Cons. Cronies. Criminals styling from the poor. Fuck ’em.