Donny Levine: You wear a bathing suit in the shower?
Todd Levine: I can’t even take my shirt off in front of other people.
Donny Levine: What’d I do to his back?
Todd Levine: Let me jog your memory.
Donny Levine: The New Kids on the Block! The heads are all warped now!
Todd Levine: That’s because I got it in third grade, my body grew!
Todd Levine: You suck.

Donny Levine: So what did the IRS say?
Randall Morgan: Three years in prison. You haven’t paid taxes since 94, Donny!
Donny Levine: What are we talking about? Fifty, sixty bucks?
Randall Morgan: Forty three thousand.
Donny Levine: Fuuuck! No!

Todd Levine: You were basically the worst parent ever!
Donny Levine: I was awesome!
Todd Levine: You let me eat cake and lollipops for breakfast every day!
Donny Levine: That’s what you asked for!
Todd Levine: You’re supposed to say no!
Donny Levine: I didn’t know what I was doing! I was 13,14 years old!
Todd Levine: Do you know what I remember? Is me having to drive you home from the beach that time because you were too drunk!
Donny Levine: Somebody’s hammered, they have another guy drive home!
Todd Levine: I was eight!
Donny Levine: And you fuckin’ drove like a champ too. Huh?