Sunday, July 29, 2012

If you take a baby to a football game, that baby will chirrup through the first quarter

and then sleep through the second

and then be GOOD TO GO FOR A FEW HOURS.

What.

I think we broke her.

In other news, I ran 20 K today. In a tank dress and flip flops.

HAHAHA no I did not. We were looking for a food truck and accidentally found ourselves watching the end of an Ironman ('looking for a food truck' is also how we found ourselves at last week's salsa competition). So while dozens of people staggered sweatily by, we sat sweatily in the shade and ate reubens.

Yarrrm.

In other, other news, my mom and sister are coming tomorrow! In honor of their impending visit, I removed all most of the rust from the bathroom! See? Ick.

Hey!

Ew.

Ping!

And so on. And then this afternoon, because it was so, so hot, we sat in the sink and smoked our spoon-pipes.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Did I ever tell you about the video monitor my dad got us? You can check it from your phone. WE LIVE IN THE FUTURE. Aside from letting me know whether she is screeching because she is an angry beast who has been put unwillingly to bed, or because she has GOTTEN HER LEG CAUGHT BETWEEN HER CRIB BARS (egads), the video monitor informs me that she sleeps directly on her face.

Just like her dad.

I got her a sippy cup so she can start drinking water like a person, and it was hilariously disastrous.

She is like, *bite bite bite* and I am like, SIPPY CUPS ARE FOR SIPPING and she is like, *dumps* but eventually she is like *sips.*

This is my favorite thing she does, where she gets so excited she can hardly stand it and she makes tiny fists and straightens her legs hard and SHRIEKS.

You can get her worked up like this by standing over her and talking to her. She is excitable.

For anyone who is wondering, her forehead is still very, very dented. See?

Sunday, July 22, 2012

We went looking for Fries and Dolls because poutine, and accidentally ended up at a salsa competition (the chopped up bits of tomato, not the sexy dance) because that's where Fries and Dolls' twitter feed said they were, but then we couldn't FIND THEM and were finally like, Whatever, fine, I will eat this butter chicken pizza and drink this limeade.

So we did and then found Fries and Dolls almost immediately.

Of course. And so to scratch that itch where you set out to do a something, we had a zesty poutine with chipotle and other shit.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Sometimes we are, say, feeding her strawberries, and the strawberry carnage makes her look like a tiny vampire, and I whip out the camera and Joel gets behind me and makes silly faces so that the tiny vampire will SMILE for the camera, and she is like, Come on, guys.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

DID I MENTION THAT I CRASHED MY STROLLER? I crashed it. Ass over tea kettle (over stroller handle over baby).

She has a dent in her forehead now, which I have given her, and because she has cowlicks where her bangs will be which I also have given her (VIA GENETICS, NOT VIA LICKING), she will never be able to wear bangs to cover the dent.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

So I have this dress that was Eleanor's Tante Tina's, and I wanted to do a little photo shoot of E in the dress before I sent it back so that her cousin Hazel (who will be big enough for it in about three days) can wear it, so I get her out on a blanket on the grass and she's all like, Urk?

and I'm like, Of course. You are facing the sun. Let me turn you around. But then she is like, H'naaaang

and I am like, Get your thumb out of your mouth, and then she is like, Bfffffbpt

Monday, July 09, 2012

I posted this to the wrong blog at first but I AM GOING TO REPOST IT OVER HERE because I like things to all be in one place.

Eleanor turned six months old while I was internetless. I only mention it because I feel that her thighs have really come into their own in the past month.

pixi stix

FEEL THE THUNDER

And remember the other day when I was like, HA HA, if this is feeding her strawberries then FEEDING HER LEMONS IS GOING TO BE GREAT? Ok well it was hilarious in that she went to town on half a lemon, but wasn't hilarious in the way that feeding a baby a lemon is SUPPOSED to be hilarious.

Saturday, July 07, 2012

You guys, so many things! I can't even...where do I? I feel like that Mitch Hedberg joke where he pinches the microphone cord and is like, I'm going to tell all my jokes like this and then let it go and you'll get them all at once.

But really I just want to post this picture.

Ok so Eleanor has been eating Human Food, but one of is us terrified she'll choke and the other one of us doesn't feel like steaming and pureeing and sitting there and feeding her messy face when they could be, I don't know, eating their own damn lunch. So I picked up these mesh bag thingies and you put food in them and she gums them and bits come out and you don't have to worry.

It's way less messy, unless you're, like, three strawberries in. By then things have gotten pretty gory.

But she's really into it (except when she's like, NO THANKS, because babies are capricious). Sometimes she can't even pick the thingie off the table before she's trying to get it into her mouth.

That looks like the behavior of an addict. OH LOOK, another sour face.