London has been battered by 50mph winds that have felled trees and caused travel chaos. Powerful gusts swept across the capital as the Met Office issued a yellow "be aware" weather alert for most of the country.

If only Alice Bell (2006) and Daniel Hit by a Train (2008) were as fine as The Festival, the third and newest offering in this loosely harnessed troika from Lone Twin, Catastrophe would lead to triumph.

One is French and renowned for his facial filler artistry, the other is the German doctor with a revolutionary range of facials and products that can transform ageing skin — no needles are necessary. Dr Sebagh and Dr Schulte are the men behind the crease-free complexions of high-profile clients all over the globe. Which man would you trust to turn back time on your face?

The excitement which greeted Centrica's decision yesterday to build a big new offshore wind farm, financed in part by recycling its capital out of earlier investments, might have persuaded an optimistic casual observer to think the UK is well on course to meet its wind generation and green energy targets. But the realistic interpretation is that people got excited because it is so unusual. Britain's embrace of renewables is nowhere near enough to meet the challenge.