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Tesco causes couple condom catastrophe

Johnny? We're sorry

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The pitfalls of online shopping at the Evil Empire were revealed in their full horror to a monogamous South Yorkshire couple, who found 12 Mates condoms added to their Tesco.com shopping list.

Lynn Newby discovered the illicit prophylactics in the Favourites list after logging on to the shopping account she shared with boyfriend Andy Allott, according to the Telegraph. She proceeded to accuse her bewildered significant other of having an affair.

"I couldn't believe what I saw when I logged onto my Tesco account," said Newby. "It gives a list of everything bought on a club card and there at the top of the list was a packet of Mates condoms. I knew I hadn't bought them so I went in and accused Andy, who had no idea what I was talking about."

Tesco admitted its grievous love-endangering rubbery fubar and sent the couple £100, along with a letter of apology from Chief Exec Sir Terry Leahy saying that the mistake was "completely unacceptable".

Tezza explained that the um, cock-up was the fault of a new member of marketing staff who was pushing the bed balloons as a promotional item. This would have been fine, but nothing explaining the promotional status of the item showed up when it snuck onto Allot's faves and blended in with his own choices.

Leahy assured that the grocery behemoth was implementing further training "as a matter of urgency" to avoid any repeat of such a strife-inducing gaffe.

"Things are fine now and we can laugh about it," said Newby, "but I just wonder how many other people had to deal with this mistake which could have cost me my four year long relationship." ®