dBFT varies differently from PoW or PoS in that there are a limited number of nodes that take part in the consensus process. In dBFT consensus nodes are selected via a voting process. This process is currently not implemented into mainstream wallets, as more research needs to be done into sybil attacks, cartel voting etc.

You can think of NEO as a representative democracy where you are allowed to elect validators

It is unlikely that an average NEO citizen will ever run a consensus node as it requires technical expertise, and a very large amount of responsibility. What you can do is run your own full node. These do not take part in the consensus process, but do help data propagate amongst the network.