Tuesday, November 5, 2013

"Shrinkage" (My book)

My first book, "Shrinkage," was released on April 29. It's available now in hardcover, digital and audiobook formats from Barnes & Noble, Amazon, iTunes, Wal-Mart (yes, my book is sold at Wal-Mart... how crazy is that??) - pretty much everywhere. I worked really hard on it and I think it's pretty good, so please consider ordering it today.

7 comments:

Very excited for the book. Today I found out that one of my best friends from high school was diagnosed with a brain tumor and I'm not sure exactly how this all works but they transferred him from Fresno CA to UCSF and he underwent surgery this afternoon. Today has been an incredibly tough day but thinking about your story has made today just a little easier.

I just finished the audiobook and I wanted to find the most personal way possible to tell Bryan that his book is an inspiration. Extremely well done. I am already recommending it to my wife and friends. I listened to it all day at work today. I plan on listening to it again many times. I don't want to sound sappy, but I love this book and I am really glad it mentioned your website among other things to check out. Thanks so much for writing your story Bryan.

BryanSaw you on Red Eye and thought you were great. Unfortunately, I am somewhat upset that you pilfered my thoughts from me, and legal action may follow(not really). For I too have a tumor in my brain stem, strangely enough it is lung cancer, and I have dealt with it like you, with dark humor in a series of emails I have sent out to friends and family.Below is an emailI I sent out Oct 19 last year. Do you see the first word, SHRINKAGE. That was my word, and you have co opted it. Although I am sure you wrote about it a lot better then me. I have also been taking oral chemo and radiation treatments, and they have been working. But there is still (hopefully) a long road ahead, which would mean I was still alive.I live in NJ,but don't know if I can make it to Ridgewood Thursday as I am usualyl exhausted at the end of the day. So I wish you the best of luck, and I will read your book in hopes that it may help me make it through whatever is coming foe me.Cheers, Eric Liebermannote: couldn't post the whole email, too many characters

Shrinkage. A word that strikes fear into the heart of every red blooded male, and I presume every, shall we say, fabulous pink blooded male. It is the fear that a potential sexual partner will see you at less than full extension, usually because of the effects of outside stimuli, such as swimming in the ocean or taking a cold shower. The shrinkage may cause the potential conquest to lose interest because they feel you might not be sufficient to satisfy your obligation, or, in the case of the pink blooded male, to be able to get to the bottom of your partner’s needs. Of course, the most famous example of this is when George Costanza spent an entire episode trying to convince Jerry’s girlfriend that she had seen him naked after a swim in the ocean which had left him in a somewhat diminished state. Most men could identify with George’s distress.There is, however, other times when shrinkage is not a terrible thing, when it can cause a man to cast his vision to the sky; to God, Yahweh, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Krishna, Zeus, Clapton or whichever Supreme Being, real or imagined, in whom you believe( when you have an incurable deadly disease, it pays to cover every base.) Shrinkage will in this case cause you to ask one of the aforementioned: “Hey man (or ma’am, for the same reason as in the previous parenthetical) you have really fucked up my life with all this cancer shit. Finally you got something right. Can you maybe throw me a few more bones? “I assume some of you (all?) may be saying: “what the hell is he talking about?” I realize I have been somewhat cryptic. The explanation is the reason for this email. For, praise the Lord and pass the ammunition, something actually good has happened in the battle against my arch enemy. After just a month of medication, my tumor has shrunk to approximately two thirds of its original size. My team (yes I have a team) of doctors were absolutely amazed at the effectiveness of the treatment. They want me to continue taking the medication in the same manner and are hopeful that eventually it will shrink to a tiny size or be completely irradiated. This is of course a wonderful thing. I can finally hope that I will be at some point virtually cancer free.However, of course, there is a downside to all of this joy, and that is I still feel like holy hell. My right eye is all messed up, my right hand ,arm, leg and foot are completely numb, as is the right size of my penis (just kidding…..of course my whole penis has been numb for years.) My legs each feel like they are enclosed in concrete, so walking is very slow and painful.

Huge Icelandic fan here! I've listened to the Adam Carolla show for years! The problem is that I want to buy your book through audible but it won't sell it in my zone :( Is this going to change in the near future?

I am a big fan of the Adam Carolla Show and I just finished your book. Thanks for sharing! I found it to be very touching and moving. I wish you all the best and look forward to many more years of you and Adam and Alison. Y'all are the best!