mommy etiquette

Ok so I have this major pet peeve. It drives me insane when people give their kids (specifically toddlers) snacks when they are in a play group type setting.

A mom at my toddler time at the library brings cheerios and feeds them to her kids during story time. My DD sees this and tries to take them. So me and all the mothers are spending the whole time trying to keep our kids from stealing this kids cheerios.

The other thing that drives me nuts is there is an ice cream truck that sits outside our playground. Parents buy their kids ice cream and set them loose on the play equipment. Forget chocolate, dairy, or nut allergies- the equipment is covered in melted ice cream! My DD gets filthy! It's such a pain in the ass!

Am I nuts for getting upset over this? Is it unreasonable to think you make your kid finish their ice-cream before they get on the play equipment?

Are there any other things that parents do (or don't do) that drive you nuts?

edit: it's really not nessisary for anyone else to reply with "why don't you just bring your own snack?" I understand that I can do that. Thanks. What I was really looking for were other things that drive you nuts- kind of Larry David style unspoken social contracts that in a perfect world everyone would follow.

Ok so I have this major pet peeve. It drives me insane when people give their kids (specifically toddlers) snacks when they are in a play group type setting.

A mom at my toddler time at the library brings cheerios and feeds them to her kids during story time. My DD sees this and tries to take them. So me and all the mothers are spending the whole time trying to keep our kids from stealing this kids cheerios.

The other thing that drives me nuts is there is an ice cream truck that sits outside our playground. Parents buy their kids ice cream and set them loose on the play equipment. Forget chocolate, dairy, or nut allergies- the equipment is covered in melted ice cream! My DD gets filthy! It's such a pain in the ass!

Am I nuts for getting upset over this? Is it unreasonable to think you make your kid finish their ice-cream before they get on the play equipment?

Are there any other things that parents do (or don't do) that drive you nuts?

edit: it's really not nessisary for anyone else to reply with "why don't you just bring your own snack?" I understand that I can do that. Thanks. What I was really looking for were other things that drive you nuts- kind of Larry David style unspoken social contracts that in a perfect world everyone would follow.

Eww that's gross that would driveMe nuts!! Nothing worse then sticky melted ice cream when I was growing up if you were eating something you sat down ate it then you could go back to playing... It only makes sense plus what if one of those kids was running around with the Popsicle on a stick in their mouth and falls it could choke them!! I think it's very reasonable to get so pissed with other parents over that, it's just ignorant on their part.

Eww that's gross that would driveMe nuts!! Nothing worse then sticky melted ice cream when I was growing up if you were eating something you sat down ate it then you could go back to playing... It only makes sense plus what if one of those kids was running around with the Popsicle on a stick in their mouth and falls it could choke them!! I think it's very reasonable to get so pissed with other parents over that, it's just ignorant on their part.

I think I would feed DD a snack during story time. If someone's kids wants some, I would be happy to share if I have extras; if not, it is not exactly my fault they didn't bring snacks for their kids. I mean you cant get mad at a mom for bringing a ball to the park, because your kid wants it the whole time.

As far as the ice cream goes that is just disrespectful. I would'nt let DD on the playground with ice cream dripping everywhere. Just as I would'nt let her pile dirt/ mud at the end of the slide or on a swing. Or pee/ poo in the sandbox. Plan disrespectful. IMO

I think I would feed DD a snack during story time. If someone's kids wants some, I would be happy to share if I have extras; if not, it is not exactly my fault they didn't bring snacks for their kids. I mean you cant get mad at a mom for bringing a ball to the park, because your kid wants it the whole time.

As far as the ice cream goes that is just disrespectful. I would'nt let DD on the playground with ice cream dripping everywhere. Just as I would'nt let her pile dirt/ mud at the end of the slide or on a swing. Or pee/ poo in the sandbox. Plan disrespectful. IMO

The snacks during story time don't bother me. If the library had a problem with it, they would handle it. If you know this is going to happen, either bring your kids a small non-messy snack like the cherrios or sit your kid away. She needs to learn that just because someone else has something doesn't mean she has to have it. Sorry. This point I don't agree with you on.

The ice cream issue I agree whole heartedly. But then I am OCD about messes like that so I would have my kids eat first, wash hand and then play or reverse it depending on what's going on.

The snacks during story time don't bother me. If the library had a problem with it, they would handle it. If you know this is going to happen, either bring your kids a small non-messy snack like the cherrios or sit your kid away. She needs to learn that just because someone else has something doesn't mean she has to have it. Sorry. This point I don't agree with you on.

The ice cream issue I agree whole heartedly. But then I am OCD about messes like that so I would have my kids eat first, wash hand and then play or reverse it depending on what's going on.

I'm with pp's on this. The snack at story time is fine as long as the library is fine with it. I use snacks to keep my hyperactive toddler distracted and compliant in certain settings. I usually bring extra, and would willingly share, but I do think it is each parent's responsibility to take care of their own kids snack "needs." If you don't want your kid to have a snack at that time, then it is an opportunity to teach your child a lesson about the "gimmes."The ice cream I agree with you about. That's rude and messy. I was raised to eat my food not spread it around on playground equipment. I'll be teaching my kids the same.

I'm with pp's on this. The snack at story time is fine as long as the library is fine with it. I use snacks to keep my hyperactive toddler distracted and compliant in certain settings. I usually bring extra, and would willingly share, but I do think it is each parent's responsibility to take care of their own kids snack "needs." If you don't want your kid to have a snack at that time, then it is an opportunity to teach your child a lesson about the "gimmes."The ice cream I agree with you about. That's rude and messy. I was raised to eat my food not spread it around on playground equipment. I'll be teaching my kids the same.

I guess the snack thing at story time bothers me so much because this women is the only one who does it- she doesn't share- and gives everyone this look like "why does your kid keep coming over to me and bothering us?" it's like going to the park with bread crumbs and getting pissed at the birds!

I guess the snack thing at story time bothers me so much because this women is the only one who does it- she doesn't share- and gives everyone this look like "why does your kid keep coming over to me and bothering us?" it's like going to the park with bread crumbs and getting pissed at the birds!

I'd have to say that the first couple of times I'd be ok with it. Then, I'd be giving you the same look. It's not my job to keep your kid content and snacked up. Look at it from the other mothers point of view. Would you like it if some kid kept coming over to you trying to take the snacks you came prepared with for your kid? You'd tolerate it at first but then get irritated as it kept happening.

I'd have to say that the first couple of times I'd be ok with it. Then, I'd be giving you the same look. It's not my job to keep your kid content and snacked up. Look at it from the other mothers point of view. Would you like it if some kid kept coming over to you trying to take the snacks you came prepared with for your kid? You'd tolerate it at first but then get irritated as it kept happening.

Mine is not the only one who goes over to her- and this is a very young group- 6 month-18 months. If it were me- and I felt like my DD couldn't sit through story time without being fed- I'd bring enough to share and share happily (with parents permission).

Mine is not the only one who goes over to her- and this is a very young group- 6 month-18 months. If it were me- and I felt like my DD couldn't sit through story time without being fed- I'd bring enough to share and share happily (with parents permission).

About the cheerio's thing, why dont you just bring snacks for your kid(s) then? If they're trying to take them, they might be hungry and need a snack of their own. Also, did you ever think of how the other mom feels? Its probably annoying to her that she thinks ahead to bring a snack for her child, and everyone else's kids are always trying to take them. I would be annoyed at that.

I do agree about the ice cream issue though. I would absolutely be peeved if my son was getting sticky and dirty from some other kids ice cream. There should be a designated eating area at every park IMO, and I also think that children should not be allowed to chew gum while playing at parks, bot just for the safety issue, but because kids leave gum wherever and it gets stepped in, sat on, etc.

About the cheerio's thing, why dont you just bring snacks for your kid(s) then? If they're trying to take them, they might be hungry and need a snack of their own. Also, did you ever think of how the other mom feels? Its probably annoying to her that she thinks ahead to bring a snack for her child, and everyone else's kids are always trying to take them. I would be annoyed at that.

I do agree about the ice cream issue though. I would absolutely be peeved if my son was getting sticky and dirty from some other kids ice cream. There should be a designated eating area at every park IMO, and I also think that children should not be allowed to chew gum while playing at parks, bot just for the safety issue, but because kids leave gum wherever and it gets stepped in, sat on, etc.

That's too risky. You don't know what allergies can exist or if they are even aware there is one. You do not want to be responsible for causing someone else's kid to get sick. Like I said, you might be ok the first couple of times but you'd get upset that these mothers were relying on you to bring snacks for everyone.

That's too risky. You don't know what allergies can exist or if they are even aware there is one. You do not want to be responsible for causing someone else's kid to get sick. Like I said, you might be ok the first couple of times but you'd get upset that these mothers were relying on you to bring snacks for everyone.

I have to say it, but I think you're the one breaking mommy etiquette on the snack thing. The first time I would share, and then I'd start wondering why the other moms can't seem to get it together and bring their own snacks. I never leave the house without some emergency snacks on hand. It is as important as extra diapers and some wipes. If you know it is coming, be prepared. It is not the one prepared mom's job to take care of all the unprepared moms kids. Either discuss taking turns bringing a group snack, or start bringing your own. Why should this woman have to be responsible for your kid's snack needs just because she comes prepared?

I have to say it, but I think you're the one breaking mommy etiquette on the snack thing. The first time I would share, and then I'd start wondering why the other moms can't seem to get it together and bring their own snacks. I never leave the house without some emergency snacks on hand. It is as important as extra diapers and some wipes. If you know it is coming, be prepared. It is not the one prepared mom's job to take care of all the unprepared moms kids. Either discuss taking turns bringing a group snack, or start bringing your own. Why should this woman have to be responsible for your kid's snack needs just because she comes prepared?

I have to agree with the majority of people here, bring your own snacks to storytime. I would not take it upon myself to offer food to children in this age range. Too many kids have allergies to various items to take it upon myself to give or offer foods.

Also I'm a germophobe so I really wouldn't want someone else giving my child their food. Yes I know she's going to eat things that I wouldn't feed her but that's different from what I see.

I have to agree with the majority of people here, bring your own snacks to storytime. I would not take it upon myself to offer food to children in this age range. Too many kids have allergies to various items to take it upon myself to give or offer foods.

Also I'm a germophobe so I really wouldn't want someone else giving my child their food. Yes I know she's going to eat things that I wouldn't feed her but that's different from what I see.

I guess you kind of have to be there to get why this lady is annoying with her cheerios. If it were a four hour long co-op playgroup- sure, let's plan for snacks- but it's 1/2 hour at the library- where food and drink isn't even allowed! I don't want her to provide snacks for my DD or for everyone- I just don't want her to get pissy when she sits on the floor with them and all the mobile toddlers come clambering over for a taste. She can either not bring snacks, sit in a chair where the babies can't get to her- or at the very least smile!

I guess you kind of have to be there to get why this lady is annoying with her cheerios. If it were a four hour long co-op playgroup- sure, let's plan for snacks- but it's 1/2 hour at the library- where food and drink isn't even allowed! I don't want her to provide snacks for my DD or for everyone- I just don't want her to get pissy when she sits on the floor with them and all the mobile toddlers come clambering over for a taste. She can either not bring snacks, sit in a chair where the babies can't get to her- or at the very least smile!

Just a question, and don't take this the wrong way. But did you want everyone's honest opinion about this or were you just looking to be validated for your stand on this? Because it looks like even though everyone is trying to get you to see it, you seem more intent on justifying why you feel you are right instead of saying ok maybe I may have not seen this from the other mothers perspective.

Playground=totally with you. Story time=sorry but you are in the wrong.

Just a question, and don't take this the wrong way. But did you want everyone's honest opinion about this or were you just looking to be validated for your stand on this? Because it looks like even though everyone is trying to get you to see it, you seem more intent on justifying why you feel you are right instead of saying ok maybe I may have not seen this from the other mothers perspective.

Playground=totally with you. Story time=sorry but you are in the wrong.

Again, why dont you bring a snack for your DD then? Clearly she would enjoy having a snack during story time, since she wants to partake in the snack the other mom is bringing. Also, bringing your own snacks might give you the chance to see things from the other mom's side. You might just end up annoyed at everyone else's children mobbing you, as I'm sure that she is. The looks she's giving you might just mean "hey, can you figure out how to manage your kid during story time, since I've come up with a way to keep my OWN kids calm and quiet?"

Maybe you bringing snacks will inspire other moms to bring their own snacks, and there you have it, pretty soon everyone is quiet and happily having a small snack of their own during story time.

Again, why dont you bring a snack for your DD then? Clearly she would enjoy having a snack during story time, since she wants to partake in the snack the other mom is bringing. Also, bringing your own snacks might give you the chance to see things from the other mom's side. You might just end up annoyed at everyone else's children mobbing you, as I'm sure that she is. The looks she's giving you might just mean "hey, can you figure out how to manage your kid during story time, since I've come up with a way to keep my OWN kids calm and quiet?"

Maybe you bringing snacks will inspire other moms to bring their own snacks, and there you have it, pretty soon everyone is quiet and happily having a small snack of their own during story time.

I am totally with you on the playground/ice cream situation. As for the library I have a couple of things to say. I always thought you weren't allowed to eat in the library for 1? 2 , cherrios ( or any other food ) can be a danger. My DD can't have them bc she's allergic, and she's almost 2, so in these types of settings it's very hard for me to keep her away from stealing your food ( while still watching my other 2 kids) & she doesn't understand yet why she can't have it. And yes I pack an absurd amount of snacks to bring everywhere , but I would be the mom trying to follow the library's rules of no snacks to begin with . Plus if the kid w the cherios is a messy eater there's crumbs my DD could pick up & eat. Or a smaller child could get to & possibly choke.

I am totally with you on the playground/ice cream situation. As for the library I have a couple of things to say. I always thought you weren't allowed to eat in the library for 1? 2 , cherrios ( or any other food ) can be a danger. My DD can't have them bc she's allergic, and she's almost 2, so in these types of settings it's very hard for me to keep her away from stealing your food ( while still watching my other 2 kids) & she doesn't understand yet why she can't have it. And yes I pack an absurd amount of snacks to bring everywhere , but I would be the mom trying to follow the library's rules of no snacks to begin with . Plus if the kid w the cherios is a messy eater there's crumbs my DD could pick up & eat. Or a smaller child could get to & possibly choke.

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