family4peace

Random thoughts (really needing to just get stuff off of my chest....)

Monday, March 31, 2008

the scratch

No news on the D**** front. Sorry. Kids are on spring break. V is at Tad's parents for a few days. We went up to my nephews show yesterday afternoon- he was great. Hard to watch him on the stage as he has taken on/over a lot of Tad's mannerisms. Almost uncanny how similar they move. It was hard for me to just enjoy E's performance as I was caught tracing the movements he made. Anyway- E was great. He has a wonderful voice. He is very talented. And he has a SENIOR as a girlfriend. He's a freshman. UGH.

Soren has continued to crawl he thinks he's pretty cool. He does every once in awhile flop back down and do the commando thing. Funny kid. I am getting pretty frustrated with him biting and hitting me. He doesn't seem to do it to anyone else. I have several bruises and scabs on my elbow. And my face is all scratched up from him trying to rip my glasses off. Nice. Not sure how to get him to stop. My current way is to tell him to Stop! He doesn't like me to raise my voice so he starts to tear up. I have also told him NO and then just set him down on the ground so he is not in my arms anymore. This seems to be very disconcerting to him. Hopefully that will work. I am listening for suggestions.

Jeff seems to be doing better. Although he seems depressed. I will walk into the bedroom (his dungeon) and often he is just looking off into the nothingness of our room. He goes back to the Dr. tomorrow so hopefully he will be given some good news. Possibility of PT soon?! I think that will be nice for him. Even to get out and drive.

I have attached a picture of the infamous scratch from D****. What a little bitch!

Friday, March 28, 2008

It's official..

Thursday, March 27, 2008

I really don't like this little girl!!

So Veda tells me yesterday that D**** was making faces at her and called her "a loser" at school. Today I decided that the principal needed to know so I called and left him a message. I get over to my friend HH's who has V overnight tonight and V proceeds to tell me that D**** pushed her today and recess!! What? Are you kidding me. I immediately call and leave yet another message for her principal.

The night goes on and I get more and more pissed. Jeff does too. We (J and I) have an argument about me having to take control of this and him feeling that he has to "puss down" to me. UGH. I just figured I started it with her parents. I did offer that he could/should come with us on Friday when we met with the parents. Anyway- he called D****'s parents and basically asked them to keep her away from Veda.

I am furious! Now it is Spring Break so school will not resume until next Monday and D****'s consequence will be forgotten or she just won't understand why it's happening. This is really frustrating and I am not sure where to go with this.

The parents just called and they say they "are going to get her some professional help". Ya think?? We had a somewhat decent conversation. I think they understand how frustrated we are. I was told by a friend that I should contact the superintendent. I think we might.

Friday, March 21, 2008

On the bus

Veda came home from school on Thursday with a big scratch under her eye. She proceeds to tell Jeff that D***** hit her, pushed her down and then scratched her!! My kid got beat up on the bus! So I find this out and call around to get the mom's number. Oh, now, she is such a lovely piece of work. This little D girl has already been suspended from school on at least one occasion that I know of. SHE IS IN FIRST GRADE! What on earth is this world coming to?

Did I mention that this little girl told Veda that she wanted to "kill your brother" and "your mom and dad are mean and I am going to poke them in the eye." Nice kid huh?

The mother proceeds to tell me that Veda has also been "causing problems". When I ask what problems she says "D**** says that Veda called her "brown". My heart jumps. I know that Veda would never do such a thing. Let me tell you I lost a lot of sleep over this one. We decide that it is best we meet to discuss the situation. Veda denies ever saying the "brown" comment. She was very honest and open with us. (I call the principal to inform him.)

We meet Friday morning and it goes okay. D**** apologizes to Veda (she still has a scratch on her face). Then the mother tells me that D**** lied about Veda calling her "brown". So a 6/7 year old has figured out that this is a good way to get people in trouble?! WTF! She apologizes.

I did end up talking to the principal and he will be investigating it today. There are video cameras on the bus so hopefully it was turned on and this little girl will have some pretty big consequences.

Veda was scared to go to school today because she thought D**** would beat her up again. D****'s parents state that she was adopted when she was 4 1/2 from Guatemala and spend most of that time in orphanages. They don't have her in therapy. Let me repeat... they DON'T have her in therapy. But they have time to take care of their 5 cats and 1 dog.

GRRR.

Soren and I are both home sick today. He has a double ear infection and bronchitis and I have the flu. Not the way I wanted to lose weight.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

"Did he suffer?"

Why can't grief be easy? There should be specific steps that you take with a certificate after completing each step! There shouldn't be any of this jumping around or "advanced grief"! What the hell is that?

So today Veda and I are walking out the door to go to piano lessons and she throws the "Did he suffer?" at me.

"Who, Veda?"

"Daddy Tad."

(The quickest answer I could come up with...) "No"

After a few seconds I decided she needed more than that. "No honey, I don't even think he knew what was going to happen. It happened so quickly that he body stopped working right away. There was no time for him to suffer. He didn't feel a thing."

So I hope that I am not lying to her. This is what I was told by Dr's and what the autopsy told me. Just too much trauma.

Jeff is coming along. He is trying to do too much I think. He is supposed to be resting and he is taking off the raised toilet seat! (Did I mention that the raised toilet seat sexually assaulted me one time in the middle of the night?! It was pretty freaky- glad it's gone.) He goes back in for another check up on 4-1 so hopefully he will be able to start PT after that. I think he is anxious to get moving more. He went for a walk yesterday- down to the gas station and brought home a gallon of milk. Shit head isn't supposed to carry that much. I think he may be trying to prove something to himself. I just love him. I sat last night and read through all of our old emails. As I told him last night- it's good to remember your history.

Soren is cute but quite frankly ticking me off. He has decided to not stay still when I am trying to change him. All moms know how annoying this is. My friends comment frequently on how my kids don't lie still to get diapers on. Why is that? Did I do something wrong? Must have skipped that page in the parenting manual. Oh yeah- my manual got destroyed in the Tsunami that hit Tecumseh last week. Bummer.

So is up again. What the hell? He should be sleeping through the night by now. He wants to see my head pop off I swear.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Standing and Walking

So my husband is walking- pretty well actually. He is doing well in his recovery. I think he is probably pushing himself a bit too much. He is upset that he is getting skinny. Feels like he is losing a lot of muscle mass. Little does he know- it doesn't matter. And he can always "bulk up" after he is healed. I think he is bored and possibly a bit depressed. The weather will hopefully get better so he will be able to do some walks outside.

Soren is starting to pull up and stand next to the couch/table. I walked into the living room the other day and there he stood. Of course I made a bit of a loud noise and quickly went over to him. It scared him and he fell on his butt and started crying... Good one mom.

Veda is having her ups and downs. (Jeff and I wonder if this is typical behavior of a 7 year old or is it diagnosable??) She has lost 7 teeth now. She is really doing well in school. Just finished a huge project on the blue jay. She had to make a model and all. Very neat.

Work is calming down after last week. Had a week long full of events that I either planned or presented at. Long nights. But it is over. Thanks to HH for all the help!!

Home to my parents this weekend. So glad to get there. Miss them so much.