Month: November 2013

The dishwasher job is going well. Unfortunately a side affect the past couple of weeks has been a numbness in my hands when I sleep. It is as if they have “Fallen Asleep” and I can not wake them up. It hurts slightly from the obvious lack of blood flow. I am not sure if it is because my hands are not use to this type of work; yet.
Then there is the pinnacle star I discovered in the palm of my hand the other day. I have always taken an interest in looking at the lines on my palms. Palm reading, tarot, all that has held a deep interest for me since I was a teenager. So looking at my left palm yesterday before getting ready for work, there I noticed, an up right, five point star. It is new, it was not there before. Wild!

I have sold only two copies of my books so far. I urge you to take the risk and check them out. I can guarantee that you will be entertained to some degree.

I received this wonderful gift today when I logged into my WordPress account. My joy and appreciation is overflowing. My week has been spent washing dishes vigorously and attempting to work myself to the bone which is just in my character; when I work, I, work. It has been both a rewarding and hurtful week. Rewarding in the sense that my spirit and mind are rejuvenated by the feeling of accomplishment; hurting because the bruises on my body and the cuts all over my hands hurt as does my lower back and my right knee. Thank you WordPress for the Anniversary gift. It truly is hard to believe that I have blogged, on and off, for four years; that One Voice, Among Billions has been alive. It is an awesome realization that my creation has been alive for this long. I am proud of my blog, for it is me in every sense of the word.

Thank You WordPress for providing an outlet where I can express myself.

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Starting an art project the first of December where I will create one piece each month for 12 months as well as write a poetry book each month(got to reboot my creativity).

Each will be unique and I will auction off each piece at the end of the month; I will sell each poetry book through Createspace. 10% of the profit will go to aid those in the Philippines and 10% will go to other charities.

I will be needing some random stuff; so I need your help.

SHARE this post to get the word out. Because I will need several different types materials to do my pieces of art. I will post a detail list of what materials I will be using each month. Any and all help will greatly be appreciated. Most if not all the materials will be random, quirky things.

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I am happy and excited to announce I got the job. I start at 4pm today as a dishwasher for a nice east cobb restaurant. The past forty eight hours has been insane. Old habits tried their best to resurface and for a moment they did. However my will and my strength to give a better life for my partner and I prevailed. It has been rough.
A new way is being created as I write. I am discontinuing the habit of smoking cigarettes today. I have had some so far, but come 3pm no more. I have lived way outside of my means. Depending on my mother to care for me and my partner. Depression is a Bitch. It has controlled me since February. No more though. I know what I am worth, I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses. I know myself, better than I would like sometimes. I am strong, I am loyal, I am kind, I am trustworthy, I am dependable, I am efficient, I am caring, and I am intelligent. Depression and the pains of addiction have tried their hardest to remove these great qualities within me. NO more will their half hearted attempts be allowed. I am done with self pity, misery, depression, and fear. No more will they live in my soul.
I will prevail and I will continue to grow; and grow stronger.
Peace Light and love

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As stated in my previous post “I am back.” The past year since my grandfathers passing and having to have relocated back home, to my mothers, life has been stressed; and I have become severely depressed. Old habits have tried their best to resurface, but somehow I have managed to squeeze out my first self-published poetry books; as well as finish five chapters of my memoir. But finding work has been extremely difficult since New Orleans. I was fired from a job for using the credit card machine as an ATM; now in my defense my last job of five years I learned it was no big deal as long as I have the money in my account. The family that owned this business drank and completely ignored the fact that those that worked around me stole from them on a daily basis. Instead of being the “snitch,” I took my punishment and left. The place is bad. It was dirty, filthy more like it, and the food was awful. Since then I have been very critical of my employers. Not a great attitude to have. I worked for a short time at a bagel shop after we moved back here. I was grateful to be employed again after having been fired for the first time in my twenty years of working. It damaged my ego and my confidence. However, the general manager sacrificed quality for speed; customers would complain that their food allergy request were not being met; I watched the general manager blatantly cut a customer off in the middle of a transaction and walk away from here(a solid regular at that) with out a single word-as me being all the way across the restaurant seeing this I rushed to her assistance and then was blamed for the delay in her service. I took my concerns to the area manager and was met with doubt and brushed off. On top of all that the General Manager had only been with the company for six months and had while I was there with the company taken 3 of 5 vacations since starting. So I left. Since then I have been very particular of the jobs I apply to. I know what I am worth. I know my skill. I am a kick ass employee to have. Just ask Tommy of Tommy’s Sandwich Shop. I am not going to give my blood, sweat, tears, smiles, skills, intellect, compassion, loyalty, and dependability to just anyone. I know I have to work to survive in today’s world, however I would choose to live in the woods than let another person put me through the crap I have gone through. I have more respect for not only myself but the human race as well. So I am off to get ready for an interview at a local restaurant here as a dishwasher. I have been applying to jobs that are different than what I normally do in the industry, which has been the front of the house. But, I have become so jaded by others working with the public is not such a good idea at the moment. I do not want to go outside the industry. I have put a great deal of time and effort in expanding my knowledge; howbeit mostly through television except my food safety certification, it is still knowledge. I am excited. Hopefully it is the beginning of a new way.
As mentioned, due to others and life in general, I have become jaded. I honestly have no desire to be around people nor I desire to serve them anymore. Something, since childhood, I have desired. When I was a kid I told my mom “I wanted to be either be an actor or a butler.” She asked, “why?” My response to her was this “Well mom they are both careers of service. I want to be of service to others; and if you think of it you have to act in both roles.” So over the years I have grown to not like much anymore. I have mentally and physically sacred myself due to the side effects of making some seriously stupid choices as well as been hurt by so many. But, I realize, thanks to my dark husband, that I must change that. So starting today, I am going to try and have a new outlook each day. Meaning I am going to search for something I like for the next thirty days. Suggestions are greatly appreciated and extremely welcomed. Knowledge is power.
So with this new job opportunity and this new outlook, hopefully a new way along a yellow brick road will be revealed and all that we have dreamed together be brought to life. I hope you all have a great day. Thank you so much for reading my thoughts and my life. Blessed Be; Peace, Light, and Love!

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Being unemployed has been, to say the least, difficult. During my twenties I made some lifestyle choices that have affected me both financially and spiritually. I accept full responsibility for the stupidity I displayed and blame no one but myself. However, in doing that I am paying for those mistakes. Finding a job has proven both difficult and equally frustrating. I have done interviews after interviews as well as applied to many other jobs. There is this air that surrounds me and I feel is the reason I am unable to get a job now. I exude depression and low self-worth. Not a good aura to have when seeking employment.
But, low and behold, “where there is a will, there is way,” proves to be a true and worthy statement for as I have struggled in search of a job I have also sought and educated myself on other means to earn an income of some type through online ventures. Finally, I have stumbled upon one, that actually works; and gives me the ability to earn a fair and decent wage. Amazon Mechanical Turk is the best site by far I found that pays you for the work you do. Everything from surveys to transcription. It’s all up to the worker how much they make. As of now I am doing well, not $8 hour well, but with a little more effort and determination, it is possible.
I feel the want to write finally boiling to the surface, because now I see a way that I can give to my family and the love of my life. It sadness and depresses the situation more when those I care for suffer and there is nothing I can do at the moment; but, there is always something and I have finally found a way. Blessed Be!
There is always light in darkness, it has to be sought and found. Something I believe with all my heart you can not have light without darkness, you can not have good without evil. You can not have a positive without a negative. For there would be no balance only chaos.
I shall tarry forth in this twisted world we live in. My life is my success, the mere fact I am still breathing and am able to wake with the morning sun is a miracle in itself. I am blessed in so many ways I feel so undeserving of such blessings. But I am blessed and I am grateful for these many blessings.
In closing, to my fellow bloggers and my faithful readers, I am back and more is to come. Oh, so much more.
Peace, Light, and Love