Friday, October 07, 2005

"a little crazy"

How can you not hear them? I hear them loud and clear? Both sides of the argument on whether Coehler's Alchemist is shit. Todd is definitely pro Coehler and Zefer decididely against. I shut my door and close my eyes to sleep but they don't go away. They just keep debating and debating. Repeating the same arguments over and over again. How can no one else hear that that? It keeps me up all night. And when I don't get sleep I begin to levitate. The less sleep I get the less effect gravity has on my body. Which sure was cool at first, but I have stuff to get done on here on the ground. I've begged them to please be quite, please stop talking just for a few hours. Do you know how hard it is to type right now? They don't seem to need to get sleep. Maybe that's how they don't age. But I know that if I don't get sleep soon they'll fire me from my job, I can't type and answer phones while I'm floating near the ceiling. The weights I use at home to keep myself pinned to the furniture are no longer allowed on the subway. I can't believe they don't behave like this around others.

Years ago when Todd and Zefer first appeared they talked only a couple of hours a day on all types of topics. They even showed me how to build a rocketship. We were all set to lauch ourselves into the 23 and 1/2 century when we realized we had no fuel and Zefer was unable to attain any. Too bad too. I thought the plan ingenius, not only would we be leaving earth but we'd also be leaving this century, this time period. Ever since the rocket fuel debacle the boys haven't been the same. They've gone from shy people, who only spoke when the three of us were together, to excruitiatingly loud chatty kathies obsessed with this stupid book.

Yes, Todd it is a stupid book. No, Zefer I'm not on your side, because the book is so stupid that there's no need to even respond to his arguments. Sure discussing literature is a fine way to spend one's time conversing, and two hours on one book seems sufficient. But it's been 60 days of not stop chatter. It's not as if you are talking about Hamlet, with all it's themes and character studies, not mention it's place in theatre history. Was Hamlet really crazy or was it just an act? Did his own pretense drive Ophelia to madness or was she always a little loopy?

OH MY GOD SHUT UP! I was talking about Hamlet! Not talking about whether that shepard boy should have taken the oasis girl to the pyramids with him in that retarded book. You know what? I don't have answer to that question. You're not going to pull me into this world of insanity. Who am I to call anyone insane? Hey you both can go screw.

Oh you meant, who is anyone to call anyone else crazy? You're saying someone could call me crazy because I'm highly emotive. Since the world affects me and I have shown little ability to remain stoic in the face of emotional stimuli I may give off the impression that I'm a "little crazy." And if you two happened to have been affected by a best selling novel is that any different than those people who line up at midnight to by the latest operating system from microsoft? At least that's a new topic to discuss. How about I sleep on it? Dude, it's nearing 2am. Please just let me sleep. What? I don't know. I don't know if it's crazy to communicate with two guys that no one else acknowledges. I promise I'll answer you tomorrow.