Entire Security Conference Forgets What SELinux Is or Does

2018-01-09 20:08

Silicon Valley, US - in an informal Security Hackfest, an entire breakout session of security experts seems to have forgotten what SELinux is or does.
“Operating system enforced isolation would be good,” said speaker Matt Dewey, referencing the recent Intel security bugs.
“Isn’t that SELinux?” said a voice from the crowd, which Matt characterized as “not entirely sure”.
After a couple minutes of clamor, though, it seemed as if nobody actually was “entirely sure” of the answer.
...

pornfs 0.6.9 Released for Linux

2018-01-03 19:16

Apache foundation has just released a Linux port of pornfs, a user filesystem that hides a porn directory in plain sight.

“The traditional way of hiding porn on Windows is just to stash it under a nested directory with boring names. You know, Desktop\Files\Project Tasks\work\proposals. Nobody would look there”, said Jeremy Wright, spokesman for the pornfs project.

“We’ve long been missing this feature on Linux.”

...

Tensions Rise Between Emacs and systemd

2017-12-17 09:42

Just one week after its formal declaration of independence, the Republic of systemd has already met opposition from rival nation Emacs over territorial disputes.

“Yeah about independenced. It turns out there’s already an Emacs keybinding for that”, said Ed Best, a spokesman for President-for-life Saint Ignutius. “Control x Meta d Meta i. You then supply your own constitution in Emacs Lisp.”

...

New JS Paradigm Deprecates Variables

2017-12-01 09:41

ECMAscript working group is reportedly having talks regarding a controversial paradigm shift in JavaScript which deprecates variables.

“Last I checked, we have 3 different package managers, 4 or 5 job systems, 4 module formats, 3 inheritance models, 3 timing models, 4 different syntaxes… I don’t see why we should have only 1 variable system.”

...

Study: Being Mauled by a Gay Bear More Likely Than Brasero Burning Disc Successfully

2017-11-26 12:47

While FOSS users have known for years that the Brasero disc burning utility is really a CD-to-coffee-coaster conversion tool in disguise, a recent study has shown that the success rate is even worse than first thought.

...

New Firefox Not Nearly Clunky and Insecure Enough for Local Man

2017-11-24 18:08

Lamenting the fact that the new Firefox “Quantum” had made his browsing experience just “too darn fast and shiny”, local man Ricky Hasshat says he wishes for the good old times, complete with single-threaded “blocking” browser windows and random high CPU usages.

...

10 Year Old Root Exploit Found in 'man' Command

2017-11-13 19:57

A 10-year old root exploit was found in the Unix “man” program used for displaying system documentation.

The “man trap exploit” is triggered when certain key combinations and escape sequences are triggered in malicious man pages, which would be able to use the screen buffer memory to replay login details. Infected man pages have been found in the core utilities of virtually every Linux and BSD distribution.

...

Sysad Discovers Backup Server Stuck in Recovery Prompt Since 2010

2017-11-10 18:58

A system administrator for a software company recently discovered a backup server that has been stuck in the “recovery mode” prompt since 2010.

“I was looking for a spare hard disk and noticed the extra box at the back of our server rack. I was half-way through unscrewing the case when I noticed it was still plugged in”, said the sysad on Friday.

...

Software Projects Surprisingly Not Actually Cancerous, Says Study

2017-11-07 19:53

Fear your software no more, say researchers from the University of Colorado, after the results of a year long study into various software projects that were often alleged to be “cancer” were released. In what should be a huge relief to users, the researchers say that no traces of actual cancer could be found.