A collection of funny, cool & intersting forwarded emails

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Couple was going out for the evening. They’d gotten ready, all dolled-up , dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives and as they start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don’t want the dog shut in, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver, “He’s just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother.”

A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. “Sorry I took so long” he says. “Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her arse downstairs and tossed her out in the back yard! She better not shit in the vegetable garden again!”

“Cash, check or charge?” the cashier asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As the woman fumbled for her wallet, the cashier noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

“Do you always carry your TV remote?” the cashier asked.

“No,” she replied. “But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him.”

Stunning crop art has sprung up across rice fields in Japan . But this is no alien creation the designs have been cleverly planned and planted.
Farmers creating the huge displays use no ink or dye. Instead, different colours of rice plants have been precisely and strategically arranged and grown in the paddy fields.

As summer progresses and the plants shoot up, the detailed artwork begins to emerge.

A Sengoku warrior on horseback has been created from hundreds of thousands of rice plants, the colours created by using different varieties, in Inakadate in Japan

The largest and finest work is grown in the Aomori village of Inakadate , 600 miles north of Toyko, where the tradition began in 1993.

The village has now earned a reputation for its agricultural artistry and this year the enormous pictures of Napoleon and a Sengoku-period warrior, both on horseback, are visible in a pair of fields adjacent to the town hall.

More than 150,000 vistors come to Inakadate, where just 8,700 people live, every summer to see the extraordinary images.

Each year hundreds of volunteers and villagers plant four different varieties of rice in late May across huge swathes of paddy fields.

Napoleon on horseback can be seen from the skies, created by precision planting and months of planning among villagers and farmers in Inkadate.

Fictional warrior Naoe Kanetsugu and his wife Osen appear in fields near the town of Yonezawa , Japan .

And in recent years, other villages have joined in with the plant designs.

Another famous rice paddy art venue is near the town of Yonezawa in the Yamagata prefecture.

This year’s design shows the fictional 16th-century samurai warrior Naoe Kanetsugu and his wife, Osen, whose lives feature in the television series Tenchijin.

Various artworks have popped up in other rice-farming areas of Japan this year, including designs of deer dancers.

Smaller works of crop art can be seen in other rice-farming areas of Japan , such as this image of Doraemon and deer dancers.

The farmers create the murals by planting little purple and yellow-leafed kodaimai rice along with their local green-leafed tsugaru roman variety, to create the coloured patterns between planting and harvesting in September.

The murals in Inakadate cover 15,000 square metres of paddy fields. From ground level, the designs are invisible, and viewers have to climb the mock castle tower of the village office to get a glimpse of the work.

Rice-paddy art began there in 1993 as a local revitalization project, an idea that grew out of meetings held by the village committee. Closer to the image, the careful placing of thousands of rice plants can be seen in the paddy fields.

The different varieties of rice plants grow alongside one another to create the masterpieces.

In the first nine years, the village office workers and local farmers grew a simple design of Mount Iwaki every year.

But their ideas grew more complicated and attracted greater attention. In 2005 agreements between landowners allowed the creation of enormous works of rice paddy art.

A year later, organisers used computers to plot the precise planting of the four differently coloured rice varieties that bring the images to life.

Look closely and guess what they could be… Are they pens with cameras? NO Any wild guesses? No clue yet? NOT YET Ladies and gentlemen…

Congratulations! You’ve just looked into the future…yep that’s right! You’ve just seen something that will replace your PC in the near future.

Here is how it works: In the revolution of miniature computers, scientists have made great developments with bluetooth technology … . These are the forthcoming computers you can carry in your pockets . This ‘pen type of instrument’ produces both the monitor as well as the keyboard on any flat surface from where you can carry out functions you would normally do on your desktop computer.

A vending machine that bakes fresh pizza in minutes for a few euros has got Italian chefs in a whirl before it hits the streets in the coming weeks.

The bright-red “Let’s Pizza” machine uses infra-red rays and technology developed at the University of Bologna to knead flour and water into dough, spread it with tomato sauce and a choice of topping, and cook it — all in less than three minutes.

Its developer, Claudio Torghele, says the machine has proved popular in trials in two Italian regions, but gourmets say it is an affront to traditional methods of cooking the classic dish.

“This is not just a vending machine, it’s a mini-pizzeria,” said Torghele, 56. “It has windows where you can watch the pizza-making process. Kids, including my own, love it: when the machine is working, there’s always a crowd.”

The device was developed with help from Anglo-Dutch group Unilever, which tested it in Germany, Torghele said. He hopes to launch the machines across Europe and in the United States, with ingredients varying according to local tastes.

At present it offers four toppings — cheese and tomato, bacon, ham and fresh vegetables — at an average cost of 4 euros. Torghele thinks “Let’s Pizza” will appeal to Europeans looking for cheap options as a recession hits their pockets. “If I want to eat a great pizza, I go to a pizzeria. But our product is satisfactory, low cost and available 24-hours a day,” he said. “This is crisis proof … McDonald’s is increasing its sales. Low cost, fast food is in demand.”

Italy is famed for its cuisine and has seen a movement develop against fast food, called “Slow Food.” But it has more vending machines than any other country in Europe, according to an industry body, mostly doling out hot coffee drinks.

Purists say the Italian pizza — invented in the 18th century in the southern city of Naples — cannot be rushed: the dough must be mixed and left for 12 hours, the ingredients kept fresh, and the oven pre-heated to around 300 degrees.

“This machine is a toy,” Pino Morelli of the Association of Italian Pizzerias said. “Perhaps it will find a niche overseas, but Italians are born with pizza: their mothers feed it to them as babies. They understand it.”

In Pizzeria Brandi, nestling near the center of ramshackle Naples, the reaction to Torghele’s invention was cool.

The restaurant invented the pizza Margherita in 1889 in honor of the queen of the newly unified country, its tomato, mozzarella and basil toppings mimicking Italy’s flag.