Surprised that noone has started this, so hopefully no one is coppying this while I start it.

Weather off and on rain. best to say dreay and leave it at that. Could use the rain though. Just not on the state fair.

Mood so so . Didn't sleep well and now the cats are driving me nuts.

Sleep Not enough. Hopefully will get a nap later.

Plans do more dishes. Pick up some.12 days til inspection. Yea rah!!. Peabody is seariously being a pain lately. Don't know if he has a case of fall feavor or is just being a nucisense. The heat was really hard on him because of his llong coat and he really likes to run around like a fool. Seriously thinking of seeing if my mom will take him. She has a ton of room for him to make a fool of himself and hopfully he'll get along wil the other cats. I'll misss my little furball. but in the end it might be the best thing for him. He's just too much for us almost. Don't really know what to do.

Weather off and on rain. best to say dreay and leave it at that. Could use the rain though. Just not on the state fair.

Mood so so . Didn't sleep well and now the cats are driving me nuts.

Sleep Not enough. Hopefully will get a nap later.

Plans do more dishes. Pick up some.12 days til inspection. Yea rah!!. Peabody is seariously being a pain lately. Don't know if he has a case of fall feavor or is just being a nucisense. The heat was really hard on him because of his llong coat and he really likes to run around like a fool. Seriously thinking of seeing if my mom will take him. She has a ton of room for him to make a fool of himself and hopfully he'll get along wil the other cats. I'll misss my little furball. but in the end it might be the best thing for him. He's just too much for us almost. Don't really know what to do.

Plans: clean my apt its a wreck. I've been very busy planning the major changes in my life. Dad was not happy when I told him about my plans. Told him too bad it stinks here. Transportation sucks big time. So he said get a job first before you move. So I am working on it. Reason I am annoyed is my DVR is MIA. She finally answered my email yesterday. So she wants a meeting with me to discuss what options I need to take. This should be interesting though.

Plans: clean my apt its a wreck. I've been very busy planning the major changes in my life. Dad was not happy when I told him about my plans. Told him too bad it stinks here. Transportation sucks big time. So he said get a job first before you move. So I am working on it. Reason I am annoyed is my DVR is MIA. She finally answered my email yesterday. So she wants a meeting with me to discuss what options I need to take. This should be interesting though.

Sleep: Tossed and turned all night. S and I had a fight right before I fell asleep and that always screws with my sleeping

Mood: Depressed. Exhausted. Baffled and the anxiety is riding really high

Plans: Continued arguement from last night with S. Went to breakfast to break it. Cried at the table in the middle of Cracker Barrel cause I realized that everything that is wrong is me cause I can't seem to stabilize the BPD when it comes to him. Went to my kids' house to attempt to figure out why my oldest is failing geometry. Found out he did not get credit for his algebra last year. As in he is a full credit in math towards graduation. And he can't build off of skills he doesn't have, right? ATTEMPTED to get oldest to be as open/honest with his anxiety issues over the class and to try to formulate a plan to help ds1 to overcome this and succeed, but that turned into "I'm your father! I should know this." Well, wtf was he in June when ds1 didn't get a credit? How does someone NOT know this? Seriously? I didn't have access to their school records or I'd have been on that like white on rice. I just don't know what to do. Ds1 does not trust nor want ex's help, and frankly, I don't blame him since the discussion was all about dad and not the issue at hand. I'll be talking to the guidance counselor on Monday to schedule an appt ASAP to discuss this situation and implement a plan. I'm going to try to include his father, but if I can't, oh well. I'll probably get more accomplished by myself anyways. I am so mad, disappointed, astounded, upset I am just ready to cry.

Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops... at all. ~Emily Dickinson

Sleep: Tossed and turned all night. S and I had a fight right before I fell asleep and that always screws with my sleeping

Mood: Depressed. Exhausted. Baffled and the anxiety is riding really high

Plans: Continued arguement from last night with S. Went to breakfast to break it. Cried at the table in the middle of Cracker Barrel cause I realized that everything that is wrong is me cause I can't seem to stabilize the BPD when it comes to him. Went to my kids' house to attempt to figure out why my oldest is failing geometry. Found out he did not get credit for his algebra last year. As in he is a full credit in math towards graduation. And he can't build off of skills he doesn't have, right? ATTEMPTED to get oldest to be as open/honest with his anxiety issues over the class and to try to formulate a plan to help ds1 to overcome this and succeed, but that turned into "I'm your father! I should know this." Well, wtf was he in June when ds1 didn't get a credit? How does someone NOT know this? Seriously? I didn't have access to their school records or I'd have been on that like white on rice. I just don't know what to do. Ds1 does not trust nor want ex's help, and frankly, I don't blame him since the discussion was all about dad and not the issue at hand. I'll be talking to the guidance counselor on Monday to schedule an appt ASAP to discuss this situation and implement a plan. I'm going to try to include his father, but if I can't, oh well. I'll probably get more accomplished by myself anyways. I am so mad, disappointed, astounded, upset I am just ready to cry.

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