@sleepyjohn: You don't test it on yourself! That's what minions and innocent victims are for!

[I'm visualizing an old Addams Family cartoon, wherein the man going to the Patent Office is looking sad while the bureaucrat points a futuristic rifle out the window at the passersby and shouts at him, "You call that a death ray? It doesn't even slow them down!"]

@DeeCee: I think my parents had a paperback collection of Charles Addams cartoons with that same one included. I *knew* there was more than one reason I liked you. (The other reason being that you applaud my filks.)

Being kissed on the nose by a zombie is perhaps the best brainwash. Much better than looking into a bright light. How many times do you remember looking into a bright light? A few times? See, it didn't always work. Now how many times do you remember being kissed on the nose by a zombie? See, it worked every time.

@ Andrew - I think. Ed is doing The Rose song that Bette Midler sang as the theme to the 70s movie of the same name. Somehow, though, i think you knew that, so sorry. Nevertheless, leave it to Unity - she kisses one nose and the muse moves readers to wax filk-etic.

I been trekkin' all day, my legs covered with goo,There's a zombie with me that's trekkin' too,It's Unity talkin', says to come along,And it's half past four when I write this song

When I know too much and its neuralyzer timeWe're standing here with shoes all filled with slimeShe don't need a clicky thing,We've got a thing that's called zombie love,I got a kiss on the nose... zombie love.

Rob (rrreed) says:
Unity, you were supposed to wipe his mind, not blow it to smithereens!

Gotta say, though, if Skin Horse is counting on the general public simply not believing anything they hear about talking dogs, zombies and so forth... this is the wrong city for it. NO's a lot like London, you can tell anything and you'll find people'll somewhere that'll listen and believe you. Usually in a bar.

Actually, that makes New Orleans the *perfect* city for counting on the public. It doesn't matter if every single person in New Orleans knows and believes about Skin Horse because nobody else believes New Orleans.

Miz Unexpected Guest is speaking into a microphone to fake the swamp entity because she is Venus, and she and Alphonse, who is pretending to be a mortician named Remy, are misleading Unity completely the wrong way. Unity's going to figure it out, find the *real* cypress, hope to get some pinwheel cookies and will get ripped to bits.

What's more, all the spare parts that "remy" gave unity are faulty and were ripped off by the tree. Let's see... was it the left arm that fell off first?

So It Begins (soitbegins) says:
I could be wrong, but I think she's using a stethoscope.

Sean Duggan (duggansc) says:
Of course, given Unity has previously shown some animal cunning, I could still see this coming around.
--
As Phoebe tries to leave, Unity grabs her arm and smiles wildly.
Phoebe: But... I thought we were friends.
Unity: Of course we are. The fox was a friend too... -- Several hours later -- Tip: Nice hat, Unity. Unity: Thanks. Made it myself.