How do I speed up my dawdler?

Grade-schoolers who move at a snail's pace can — and should — learn that tardiness has consequences. Your goal is to encourage your dawdler to take charge of this area of his life. That way, he'll learn that no matter how much he likes to putter around the house, some things — like getting to school on time — simply aren't negotiable.

You can do your part by making sure that distractions are kept to a minimum when you're trying to get out the door. If the TV's turned off, his toy trains are put away, and his brother isn't trying to best him in a game of hoops, he'll be better able to focus on getting ready. You can also help by asking your grade-schooler how the two of you might solve the problem together. Would it help to put his clothes out the night before? Does he need to get up 20 minutes earlier? Should you set a timer ten minutes before he has to walk out the door? Just be sure he understands that while you're willing to work with him, it's his job to catch the school bus on time. And it may take missing the bus to teach him that lesson. (Of course, that means you'll have to drive him to school yourself — but the indignity of that should help motivate him to catch the bus in the future.)

By letting go of this responsibility, not only do you get to stop nagging, you'll put an end to the power struggle that dragged out your son's dawdling in the first place.

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