2) Make sure that there is actually a listformwebpart on the page
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Maks MatsveyeuMar 2 '12 at 20:44

3) hide the listforwebpart on prerender. This solution is quite dirty but when you realize how it all works you will be able to come to the idea how to make it more clear. Like my team and me did :) I wish you good luck
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Maks MatsveyeuMar 2 '12 at 20:46

I have an idea for this task - you can implement your custom form UI as a webpart and add it to a standard list item form. Then you need to hide (but not delete) a standart data form on that page. The idea behind it is to let the dataform webpart do the work for you - on a standard page it requests the needed tabs from the ribbon.. I've realized that it doesn't work because in this case you will not be able to control item save button - it will be rendered by DataFormwebPart. :(