School Bullying

What should be done about school bullying and cyber bullying so that it does not seem okay to keep on doing it? As it is in many schools a bully will be reprimanded for a behavior but will come back from punishment and repeat the same behavior. With texting becoming more and more popular and the commonality of the internet, school officials can not do anything about what is said or done to a certain student off campus. I bring this up because of Phoebe Prince, a 15-year old who recently killed herself, was being bullied via text message and facebook. What should the punishment be for kids who bully others in school? And is there any way to enforce a way to punish people for cyber bullying?

What should be done about school bullying and cyber bullying so that it does not seem okay to keep on doing it? As it is in many schools a bully will be reprimanded for a behavior but will come back from punishment and repeat the same behavior. With texting becoming more and more popular and the commonality of the internet, school officials can not do anything about what is said or done to a certain student off campus. I bring this up because of Phoebe Prince, a 15-year old who recently killed herself, was being bullied via text message and facebook. What should the punishment be for kids who bully others in school? And is there any way to enforce a way to punish people for cyber bullying?

Oh I am sure. I teach 7th grade and the drama(student AND parent) is endless.

Kinda OT - At the high school I was at last year there was a gun fight off campus between 2 parents for what was occurring with their daughters at school. After running from the cops the mothers told their daughters and their friends to "finish it" at school. Yea.... 10 expulsions in one day. Parenting at it's finest.

Oh I am sure. I teach 7th grade and the drama(student AND parent) is endless.

Kinda OT - At the high school I was at last year there was a gun fight off campus between 2 parents for what was occurring with their daughters at school. After running from the cops the mothers told their daughters and their friends to "finish it" at school. Yea.... 10 expulsions in one day. Parenting at it's finest.

re⋅spect â€“noun3. esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgment.4. deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment: respect for a suspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for the elderly.5. the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.6. respects, a formal expression or gesture of greeting, esteem, or friendship: Give my respects to your parents.7. favor or partiality.

â€“verb (used with object)9. to hold in esteem or honor: I cannot respect a cheat.10. to show regard or consideration for: to respect someone's rights.

Yes it is respect, by each of those definitions of the word. - Respect in the bully's eyes. - Respect in the eyes of the other kids that are bullied by that same bully. - Self-Respect for not allowing themselves to essentially be abused by the other student.

There is no mistake in my use of the word. You may disagree and I do respect that (again not a misuse of the word or the English language on my end). However again, I did not expect people to necessarily agree with me. I come from an old school way of thinking, I know that. However I have yet to insult your way of thinking in the least. I have defended my position and belief.

re⋅spect â€“noun3. esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgment.4. deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment: respect for a suspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for the elderly.5. the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.6. respects, a formal expression or gesture of greeting, esteem, or friendship: Give my respects to your parents.7. favor or partiality.

â€“verb (used with object)9. to hold in esteem or honor: I cannot respect a cheat.10. to show regard or consideration for: to respect someone's rights.

Yes it is respect, by each of those definitions of the word. - Respect in the bully's eyes. - Respect in the eyes of the other kids that are bullied by that same bully. - Self-Respect for not allowing themselves to essentially be abused by the other student.

There is no mistake in my use of the word. You may disagree and I do respect that (again not a misuse of the word or the English language on my end). However again, I did not expect people to necessarily agree with me. I come from an old school way of thinking, I know that. However I have yet to insult your way of thinking in the least. I have defended my position and belief.

This caught my eye last night and after reading all the way through I know I am late but I wanted to put in my two cents.

Not all bullying can be fixed by a fist fight. When I was in 8th grade a girl decided she was jealous of my best friend turned boyfriend. Lasted a week and we were back to being best friends. (I didnt know this until about 2 years ago.) Well over Christmas break my whole group of friends stopped talking to me. No one would tell me why or what I did. I mean I must have done something right? Well it spread from my group of friends to the whole school. At least the whole 8th grade class.

In my school the grades were separated and only ever saw each other in the hallways. This was a drastic difference between my previous middle school where students of all grades mingled at lunch and other times. So my whole class stopped talking to me. Except for like 3 kids. Bless their hearts. But I never really got to see these kids. My 2nd middle school had teams. 742 for example was 7th grade 4 teachers and the 2nd 7th grade team to have 4 teachers. In 8th grade I was on a 2 team. I had 2 teachers and I saw the same kids all day long.

I told my parents I was being bullied and they only ever told me the story of my sister decking the girl on the playground and never having to worry about it again. What was I supposed to do fight the whole school? I asked to switch schools but I wasnt allowed because thats the school the bus took me to.

I have talked to my mom about it and she said she didnt really think it was that bad. I dont know how she couldnt think it was not that bad. I lost a dramatic amount of weight. I became withdrawn and horrible depressed. I went to bed every single night hoping I wouldn't wake up. I started doing very poorly in my classes. I just dont know how one couldnt notice that their child was suffering.

In the end high school saved me. Even though the middle school fed directly into the high school I just started hanging out with Jrs and Srs. They didnt mind the mostly quiet freshman.

I dont think my sittuation is a rare one. But its one in that everyone but the parents is powerless. I mean how can a teacher make teenagers talk to someone really? My parents were the ones in the wrong on this one. It has helped made me who I am. But it was the worst semester of any schooling I have ever had. It makes me want to home school my daughter. I know I cant shelter her. And My fears cant stop her from doing her thing. But I do promise that if my daughter asks me to switch schools more than once. I will find a way.

This caught my eye last night and after reading all the way through I know I am late but I wanted to put in my two cents.

Not all bullying can be fixed by a fist fight. When I was in 8th grade a girl decided she was jealous of my best friend turned boyfriend. Lasted a week and we were back to being best friends. (I didnt know this until about 2 years ago.) Well over Christmas break my whole group of friends stopped talking to me. No one would tell me why or what I did. I mean I must have done something right? Well it spread from my group of friends to the whole school. At least the whole 8th grade class.

In my school the grades were separated and only ever saw each other in the hallways. This was a drastic difference between my previous middle school where students of all grades mingled at lunch and other times. So my whole class stopped talking to me. Except for like 3 kids. Bless their hearts. But I never really got to see these kids. My 2nd middle school had teams. 742 for example was 7th grade 4 teachers and the 2nd 7th grade team to have 4 teachers. In 8th grade I was on a 2 team. I had 2 teachers and I saw the same kids all day long.

I told my parents I was being bullied and they only ever told me the story of my sister decking the girl on the playground and never having to worry about it again. What was I supposed to do fight the whole school? I asked to switch schools but I wasnt allowed because thats the school the bus took me to.

I have talked to my mom about it and she said she didnt really think it was that bad. I dont know how she couldnt think it was not that bad. I lost a dramatic amount of weight. I became withdrawn and horrible depressed. I went to bed every single night hoping I wouldn't wake up. I started doing very poorly in my classes. I just dont know how one couldnt notice that their child was suffering.

In the end high school saved me. Even though the middle school fed directly into the high school I just started hanging out with Jrs and Srs. They didnt mind the mostly quiet freshman.

I dont think my sittuation is a rare one. But its one in that everyone but the parents is powerless. I mean how can a teacher make teenagers talk to someone really? My parents were the ones in the wrong on this one. It has helped made me who I am. But it was the worst semester of any schooling I have ever had. It makes me want to home school my daughter. I know I cant shelter her. And My fears cant stop her from doing her thing. But I do promise that if my daughter asks me to switch schools more than once. I will find a way.

"The power of ignore (with verbal situations) is just as empowering. The understanding they can tell an adult and trust in them to help is just as empowering. And leading by example is just as empowering. I also think building on children and their qualities builds confidence and praising them for their abilities builds self esteem."

I couldn't agree with you more.

"The power of ignore (with verbal situations) is just as empowering. The understanding they can tell an adult and trust in them to help is just as empowering. And leading by example is just as empowering. I also think building on children and their qualities builds confidence and praising them for their abilities builds self esteem."

We just had a parent go to jail over drama at a HS here in town. She was mad because her daughter, whom was a known bully herself, met her match. The other girl apparently put her in her place and the mom came to school to take care of the other girl. She had a loaded gun in her purse.

And we wonder why kids are the way they are these days..........that old apple surely does not fall from the tree!

We just had a parent go to jail over drama at a HS here in town. She was mad because her daughter, whom was a known bully herself, met her match. The other girl apparently put her in her place and the mom came to school to take care of the other girl. She had a loaded gun in her purse.

And we wonder why kids are the way they are these days..........that old apple surely does not fall from the tree!

You know what's strange? After all the years, the Ring Leader who more or less destroyed my childhood, and I came to a bit of a "truce." Years later, she did apologize for torturing me. I was fortunate enough that she did so. Many bullies don't reform like that. You know what's even more ironic? She became a police officer!

I really do wonder what went on in her home that made her so hateful, and I wonder what changed her heart. I still have a raw spot in my heart that doesn't want to make the effort to become a friend to her and find out, though. I spent so many years of my life caring what she thought about me, that I don't think I have it in me to care enough to find out what happened to her. I do feel some compassion for her, though, strange as that may seem.

Well, thank you very much! That means a lot to me. :)

You know what's strange? After all the years, the Ring Leader who more or less destroyed my childhood, and I came to a bit of a "truce." Years later, she did apologize for torturing me. I was fortunate enough that she did so. Many bullies don't reform like that. You know what's even more ironic? She became a police officer!

I really do wonder what went on in her home that made her so hateful, and I wonder what changed her heart. I still have a raw spot in my heart that doesn't want to make the effort to become a friend to her and find out, though. I spent so many years of my life caring what she thought about me, that I don't think I have it in me to care enough to find out what happened to her. I do feel some compassion for her, though, strange as that may seem.

I know DJ said that the school takes it pretty seriously. I have yet to see that here. In fact, one of the girls that were being BULLIED got suspended because the Bully here reported that the girl was harassing her at the bus stop. Yet the same school ignored and said "Oh well" when the bully cut off the same girls pony tail last year and stuff.

If the schools are going to act, they need to act across the board. Not pick and choose (as in this case). However I don't think it is the schools issue either, they cannot control how these kids are being raised. As far as the principle knows when the bully goes home the child is praised by the parents for its actions.

I know DJ said that the school takes it pretty seriously. I have yet to see that here. In fact, one of the girls that were being BULLIED got suspended because the Bully here reported that the girl was harassing her at the bus stop. Yet the same school ignored and said "Oh well" when the bully cut off the same girls pony tail last year and stuff.

If the schools are going to act, they need to act across the board. Not pick and choose (as in this case). However I don't think it is the schools issue either, they cannot control how these kids are being raised. As far as the principle knows when the bully goes home the child is praised by the parents for its actions.

Sorry but I doubt a Police Officer would tell you child to hit someone back because they threw the first punch is self defense. Not only am I married to a Police Officer but I am a teacher. Because bullying has become such an issue I have had to take part in mandatory training on it from Professionals. NOT ONCE IN ALL OF THE TRAINING I received was it EVER ok to hit back. In fact it was pounded into our head this action come of legal age is called simple battery, and BOTH individuals would go to jail.

Now had your daughter walked away the girl followed her and despite your daughter stating over and over again to stop then yes that would be self defense. But simply because one girl got in her face and hit first then your daughter immediately hits back does not equate self defense.

You are right, it is a slippery slope. I think parents need to be held accountable more for their child's action when it comes to bullying. Sadly in my expierence most bullies are pure products of their environments. But I think the key is teaching our children the correct meaning of self defense so they understand that self defense is the last means and it is not a solution but merely a quick stall tactic until they are in a safer envirnoment to alert the correct authorities, whether it be a school official, an adult, a parent, or even the police.

Sorry but I doubt a Police Officer would tell you child to hit someone back because they threw the first punch is self defense. Not only am I married to a Police Officer but I am a teacher. Because bullying has become such an issue I have had to take part in mandatory training on it from Professionals. NOT ONCE IN ALL OF THE TRAINING I received was it EVER ok to hit back. In fact it was pounded into our head this action come of legal age is called simple battery, and BOTH individuals would go to jail.

Now had your daughter walked away the girl followed her and despite your daughter stating over and over again to stop then yes that would be self defense. But simply because one girl got in her face and hit first then your daughter immediately hits back does not equate self defense.

You are right, it is a slippery slope. I think parents need to be held accountable more for their child's action when it comes to bullying. Sadly in my expierence most bullies are pure products of their environments. But I think the key is teaching our children the correct meaning of self defense so they understand that self defense is the last means and it is not a solution but merely a quick stall tactic until they are in a safer envirnoment to alert the correct authorities, whether it be a school official, an adult, a parent, or even the police.

It is not the solutions are working thus the cause for media attention but rather we are becoming more aware and educated about the concerns thus the reason for more media coverage. Five years ago you would have never seen the local news cover a story over a bullying issue, but now it makes all the news. Why? Because we (society) has acknowledge it as a problem.

Last week I had a student get angry and yell at another student. I asked what the deal was and he said the other student has his pencil and would not give it back. The student with the pencil it was his. Turns out the one yelling was taught to never let someone walk over him and was told by his parents to do whatever to get what is his............hmmmmmm, it is a pencil. Couldn't a civilized conversation been the start and then I would have dealt with it had that not resolve it.

I do believe in the "just cause" effect. Trust me I get it. I see the what goes around comes around deal. However I think as parents we owe our children to educate them to let them know they do not have to resort to violence to solve conflict and that sometimes walking away is better than stooping to the other level. My son's confidence will not be set on the mere fact if someone hits him in a childish act that he must hit back to be "the man". I do not want his ability to feel worthy or have self esteem being built on the fact he can kick someone's butt if need be.

I just think the mantality of "dish it back" is over used. I think the notion of "nobody cares" is not the majority, and the fact there are many one can trust should be the first step in combating the issues of bullies vs. "hit them back, give them what they gave you so they can learn their lesson" theory.

It is not the solutions are working thus the cause for media attention but rather we are becoming more aware and educated about the concerns thus the reason for more media coverage. Five years ago you would have never seen the local news cover a story over a bullying issue, but now it makes all the news. Why? Because we (society) has acknowledge it as a problem.

Last week I had a student get angry and yell at another student. I asked what the deal was and he said the other student has his pencil and would not give it back. The student with the pencil it was his. Turns out the one yelling was taught to never let someone walk over him and was told by his parents to do whatever to get what is his............hmmmmmm, it is a pencil. Couldn't a civilized conversation been the start and then I would have dealt with it had that not resolve it.

I do believe in the "just cause" effect. Trust me I get it. I see the what goes around comes around deal. However I think as parents we owe our children to educate them to let them know they do not have to resort to violence to solve conflict and that sometimes walking away is better than stooping to the other level. My son's confidence will not be set on the mere fact if someone hits him in a childish act that he must hit back to be "the man". I do not want his ability to feel worthy or have self esteem being built on the fact he can kick someone's butt if need be.

I just think the mantality of "dish it back" is over used. I think the notion of "nobody cares" is not the majority, and the fact there are many one can trust should be the first step in combating the issues of bullies vs. "hit them back, give them what they gave you so they can learn their lesson" theory.

In a lot of ways yes they have. However I hear these spineless parents also say their hands are bound. If they become more strict or if they spank they are afraid of outside interference from agencies like CPS. (Not saying it is right or wrong btw). A lot of parents feel that the government has interfered with how they are allowed to discipline their children. I also think that too much parental peer pressure has interfered with it.

In a lot of ways yes they have. However I hear these spineless parents also say their hands are bound. If they become more strict or if they spank they are afraid of outside interference from agencies like CPS. (Not saying it is right or wrong btw). A lot of parents feel that the government has interfered with how they are allowed to discipline their children. I also think that too much parental peer pressure has interfered with it.

Well seeing as you think retaliation is self defense it is not suprising you cannot see how you are using respect incorrectly.

No one respects the bully. The bullied child is not respected by the bully. The children around watching are totally not even thinking about respect but rather a "good show". No one is held with high worth and certainly there is no respect for one's right or else this whole situation would be a moot point. No one is being favored partially and there is certainly no friendship between the two to be respected.

So yes........respect is not the correct term but rather fear. The bully now realizes he is not in control and FEARS this could happen again. He is now embarrassed and probably angry. The other child is happy he won. He is now relieved to know he does not have to be fearful of the bully. No where is there respect.

Well seeing as you think retaliation is self defense it is not suprising you cannot see how you are using respect incorrectly.

No one respects the bully. The bullied child is not respected by the bully. The children around watching are totally not even thinking about respect but rather a "good show". No one is held with high worth and certainly there is no respect for one's right or else this whole situation would be a moot point. No one is being favored partially and there is certainly no friendship between the two to be respected.

So yes........respect is not the correct term but rather fear. The bully now realizes he is not in control and FEARS this could happen again. He is now embarrassed and probably angry. The other child is happy he won. He is now relieved to know he does not have to be fearful of the bully. No where is there respect.

There are others to illustrate that as well, that should be implemented first. Hitting should not be the first knee jerk reaction, especially when other means of solving the conflict that are acceptable and appropriate are used first.

There are others to illustrate that as well, that should be implemented first. Hitting should not be the first knee jerk reaction, especially when other means of solving the conflict that are acceptable and appropriate are used first.

The way people bully is a lot different then when we were kids. Kids are SO harsh now. I was on morning duty this morning and the things I overheard kids saying about other students was just horrible, I wouldnt say those things about my worst enemy. Kids have grown up too fast, they are saying adult things, they dont even know what they mean some of the time, and when they are critized on adult level their immature minds dont know how to handle the critisim.

The way people bully is a lot different then when we were kids. Kids are SO harsh now. I was on morning duty this morning and the things I overheard kids saying about other students was just horrible, I wouldnt say those things about my worst enemy. Kids have grown up too fast, they are saying adult things, they dont even know what they mean some of the time, and when they are critized on adult level their immature minds dont know how to handle the critisim.

The obligations of our representatives in Washington are to protect our liberty, not coddle the world, precipitating no-win wars, while bringing bankruptcy and economic turmoil to our people. --- Ron Paul I am just absolutely convinced that the best formula for giving us peace and preserving the American way of life is freedom, limited government, and minding our own business overseas. ---Ron Paul

Like I posted earlier in the thread. My "School Bully" well one of them, and I are now friends. Since I have been homebound a lot in this pregnancy she has even made trips to the library for me. We have been friends for about 15 years or so. To the point that we laugh and joke about it now and she actually explained it.

Apparently when she was out with her family some time ago, someone at a restraunt recognized her and straight out said to her, "So, are you still a B!7@h?" She said that hurt a lot and she of course is not. However she was a very very large girl in school and being the bully was the only way she didn't get picked on.

Like I posted earlier in the thread. My "School Bully" well one of them, and I are now friends. Since I have been homebound a lot in this pregnancy she has even made trips to the library for me. We have been friends for about 15 years or so. To the point that we laugh and joke about it now and she actually explained it.

Apparently when she was out with her family some time ago, someone at a restraunt recognized her and straight out said to her, "So, are you still a B!7@h?" She said that hurt a lot and she of course is not. However she was a very very large girl in school and being the bully was the only way she didn't get picked on.

I do have to agree. Tattling does nothing. It never has. It makes the bullied student look weaker to the bully. It makes the tattling student more of a target. It makes the bullying worse. "Mommy's got to fight your battles for you!" and other statements.

7th graders should NOT be getting records for fist fights. When this started happening is when we started tying their hands and allowing them to stand up for themselves. That is what it is. I'm sorry, however I am not going to teach my children (or any child) to wait till he is backed into a corner and being beaten before he reacts and acts on his own behalf. That is teaching him to do nothing. That is allowing the "Bully" to continue to ABUSE that child.

I do have to agree. Tattling does nothing. It never has. It makes the bullied student look weaker to the bully. It makes the tattling student more of a target. It makes the bullying worse. "Mommy's got to fight your battles for you!" and other statements.

7th graders should NOT be getting records for fist fights. When this started happening is when we started tying their hands and allowing them to stand up for themselves. That is what it is. I'm sorry, however I am not going to teach my children (or any child) to wait till he is backed into a corner and being beaten before he reacts and acts on his own behalf. That is teaching him to do nothing. That is allowing the "Bully" to continue to ABUSE that child.

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