It is exactly as it appears.But the guy filming says, kief! your a pirate!He looks at the camera, piss drunk, and says "That would explain everything"then he kicks some tree ass.The entire thing reminds of of Bad Santa.BB stumbling in shitty ass drunk and kicking the shit out of the decorations in the mall at the santa picture station.

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You ever see bad santa scotty? This scene and because I know no sound for you:Willy (Santa) : Billy Bob ThortonMarcus: Tony CoxGin (Mall head of security) : Bernie Mac INT. CHAMBERLAIN'S - WINTER WONDERLAND - DAY Marcus checks his watch impatiently as the endless line of excited children and their parents impatiently murmurs. The tension is suffocating Marcus. Finally, a gasp goes up from the crowd. Marcus looks up to see Willie, totally shit-faced. His costume is half on, his undergarments are showing, and his hand clutches the neck of a broken bottle. MARCUS No. Willie stumbles over a burro and falls into a pile of fake snow. He rises to his feet and begins to pummel the statue. WILLIE You fuckin' spic! Children scream in horror as mothers cover their eyes. Gin enters the Wonderland and takes in the spectacle. GIN Sweet Jews for Jesus... Willie finishes dispatching the burro and stumbles to his Santa chair. Marcus stomps up to him. MARCUS Holy motherfuck. What do you think you're doing? WILLIE (sobbing) I pissed my pants! Marcus pounces on him. MARCUS You son of a bitch! Gin pulls Marcus off. GIN Alright, let's get him out of here. I'll go smooth this over with Chipeska. Food poisoning, something. The two men face each other, their voices rising. Beyond them we see the line of children staring at them. MARCUS What do you mean, get him out of here? GIN Take him to his car. MARCUS In case you hadn't noticed, I'm a motherfuckin' dwarf. So unless you got a forklift handy, maybe you should lend a hand. GIN That figures, you wantin' all kinds of set-asides and special treatment 'cause of your handicap. You're all the same. MARCUS Special treatment? I'm three fucking feet tall, asshole -- it's a matter of physics! Draw me a sketch how I get him to the car! Gin notices the line of kids staring. He puts up a sign that reads: "Santa Has Gone To Feed His Reindeer. He'll be back soon". GIN Bitch, bitch. MARCUS Sketch it up, fuckin' moron. Fuckin' Leonardo da Vinci. GIN What did you call me, thigh-high? MARCUS I called you a fuckin' guinea Homo. From the fifteenth fuckin' century. GIN I could stick you up my ass, smallfry. MARCUS Yeah? You sure it ain't too sore from last night? GIN You got some lip on you, midget. MARCUS Well it was on your wife's pussy last night. Why don't you dust that thing once in a while. Asshole.

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That movie is the funniest fucking thing I have ever seen related to christmas.Iv seen it 3 times this year, and atleast 30 total since it came out.Its good i have it memorized as I like to smoke a big bone and then start it up and hit a extra spliff about every 30 minutes in to it.While bad santa is great, badder (unedited,unrated and longer) is even greater.That is not even close to the best scene. John ritter catching him fucking fat girls in big and tall, talking to Mac about his concerns over santa, santa fucking the bar maid int eh parking lot, explaining why his beard is fake to the kid (I slept with a unclean woman and my beard fell out, now I gotta wear this piece of shit, mrs santa? No, her sister) Willies summer vacation waiting for marcus to call to set up the next mall santa robbery, Teaching the kid to fight, the wooden pickle, preparing to rob an old lady (Is granma spry?) FUck oh dear, even sober that movie kills me. Do not rent it, buy the fucker, buy it today and watch it tonight! watch it on christmas, and watch it any time fo year, and every year!

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Just to set teh mood for you scotty, teh movie opens in a bar, like one youd see on its a wonderful life, snow flakes drifting down, willie in his santa suit, drunk as fuck with the following voice over: I've been to prison once. I've been married twice. I was once drafted by Lyndon Johnson and had to live in shit-ass Mexico for two and a half years for no reason. I've had my eye socket punched in, a kidney taken out, and I got a bone chip in my ankle that's never gonna heal. I've seen some pretty shitty situations in my life. But nothing has ever sucked more ass than this. If I'd known I was gonna have to put up with screaming brats pissing on my lap for 30 days out of the year, I would have killed myself a long time ago. Come to think of it, I still might. Where I come from, we didn't celebrate Christmas. Not because we were Jewish, but because my dad was a worthless-coward fucking asshole whose idea of a present was a daily punch to the back of the head. He did teach me how to crack a safe, though. My dad never did shit with his life, so he took it out on me. You could say I'm no different. I'd have to say you were right. But at this point, it's too late to start over.

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