These are not easy times for young families: the job market is tight, the price of housing is sky high, incomes are not keeping up with inflation and post-secondary education leaves the average person about $25,000 in debt before his or her working life even begins.

To get a sense of how families are coping with the stresses of raising children in tough times, The Vancouver Sun spoke with several Metro Vancouver parents with children under the age of five.

Many felt their children’s futures don’t look as bright as their own once did. And while all hope their children will get a good education and do well in life, there was a common theme of downplaying the importance of material goods and consumption.

Michael Tudorie, who came to Canada as a stowaway on a ship in 1989, for example, said his parents had a lower standard of living in Romania, yet they were happier with what they had.

“They had the mentality that as long as you’re healthy with your family around you and have a positive attitude, then nothing else matters, you just go day by day,” said Tudorie, now a 43-year-old real-estate salesman with Dexter Associates in Yaletown and the father of a four-year-old son.

Tudorie was just 19 when he left Romania to start anew in Canada with just $30 in his pocket. He entered Canada as a refugee and is now a Canadian citizen.

The journey hasn’t always been easy.

By the time Tudorie left university, where he studied marketing and communications, he had $28,000 in student debt, despite working full-time while attending school.

He met his future wife, Luba, in Vancouver in 2000. An assistant store manager, she’s immigrated to Canada at about the same time from Slovakia.

“People think that if they have more, they will be happier,” Tudorie said, “even though it could be the opposite.”

Angie Chan, the mother of Isla, 3, and Duncan, 1, said she has high hopes for her children — but those hopes are tempered.

“I am hopeful that they will find good jobs and earn a good standard of living,” she said, “but I think they are likely going to have to fight harder for those things than I did.”

Chan, 32, lives in Vancouver where she has a master’s degree and works as a health care manager; her husband is a lawyer. She said she had to get a lot more education than her parents did to have the same income and opportunity.

“Because of the last five years of economic downturn, our living standards feel a lot more uncertain,” Chan said. “There seems to always be the looming possibility that jobs and homes will be lost; and there is always a question for me as to whether we are saving enough for ourselves and our children.

“I think, generally, our parents saw a world of opportunities, if not for themselves, then at least for their children. But we regularly hear stories of livelihoods undermined locally and around the world.”

Lena Jerabek, 35, and her husband James Merinuk, 38, have two children: Jonah, 3, and Lucie, 1. They hope their kids will be able to get as much post-secondary education as they did.

“We also hope that they will find work that they truly enjoy, that is meaningful to them, and that they will pursue that above pursuing money for the sake of money,” Jerabek said. “I don’t need for them to be rich by conventional standards, but I do hope for them to be happy and comfortable.”

But getting there is a challenge for young families, facing a rapid increase in the cost of living — from gas prices to insurance to housing — while wages haven’t kept pace.

That’s why, for now, Lukas Tudorie is an only child. “We want to have another child one day, but if we can afford it may be another thing,” Tudorie said.

Nonetheless, Tudorie is hopeful that Lukas will have an even better standard of living than he and Luba have.

They plan to send Lukas to a French immersion kindergarten at a public elementary school, but they’ve also considered private schools — the preference of many of the parents of young children he meets.

“By the time he is in Grade 3 or 4, I will see how the public school is going,” Tudorie said, adding he’s concerned about the high ratio of students per teacher in the public school system.

Right now, Lukas wants to be a bus driver, a chef or a race car driver when he grows up but, Tudorie says, “he’s just a kid” and will probably change his mind many times.

The most important thing for Tudorie is that Lukas is happy with the career he ultimately chooses.

“I just let him explore the things he likes; the things he leans toward,” Tudorie said. “It has to come from within.”

The high cost of housing is also a concern for many young families and a worry for their children.

“Many families need to have both parents working, but then the cost of daycare for young children is so high that often it doesn’t make sense,” Jerabek said. “I also fear that they might not ever be able to afford a home in the Lower Mainland, if that’s what they ultimately want.”

Jerabek recently started a home-based business in New Westminster — Beesafe Solutions, which sells emergency kits — so she could spend more time with her kids. Her husband is a district sales manager for Ecolab Canada, which provides water, hygiene and energy technologies and services.

“We are sacrificing financially in the short term as my business grows, but already we feel like this is the far better choice for our family and that we all have more time together,” Jerabek said.

Tudorie says he doesn’t worry about the economy and tries to stay positive.

“It’s up to an individual to make it or not make it; they cannot wait for a government handout,” Tudorie said, while adding that he and Luba are big proponents of government investment in various social programs for children and seniors versus subsidizing private enterprises.

As far as balancing the need for economic growth against environmental concerns, he said people need to have the right to agree or disagree with government decisions after weighing out the pros and cons of each case.

“It depends on what it is. For example, I’m all for the oil pipeline planned from Alberta to the United States, because I think it’s a good thing so that we don’t depend on oil from Middle Eastern countries,” he said. “But I’m not for cutting down trees to build a resort.”

Jerabek said consumers should question their need for physical goods.

“I do feel that economic growth is important, however this growth needs to be conscious and I think we as consumers really need to question our need for physical goods,” Jerabek said.

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Raising kids in tough times

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