Rant. Hair. frizzy. why don't hairdressers listen

My hair was cut yesterday. It is thick and wavy and turns to frizz when short.

I provided a photo showing a cut like Jo Grant's in Dr Who (Jon Pertwee). a bit layered, medium longish, and with each of the layers curling with their own length.

I asked that NO thinning scissors or razors be used, just the scissors. I also said I'm not going to be a slave to a hairdryer, so please cut the hair so it will be low maintainence. But did they listen?

I came out looking like Jennifer Anniston. AGAIN. With wispy ends and edges and hair all blow-dried straight.

Once it is washed I will look like a witch, with lots of ends flying in all directions. I will then wear it up in a bun for work, or a ponytail, so it looks relatively neater, and then it will be at least another year before I brave going into another hairdresser.

I hate this. It happens most of the time.

Hairdressers always bloody whip out the thinning scissors, and trim the edges around my face and at the ends so it looks and feels like I have feathers. They say the thinning scissors are important to make sure the ends arent noticed, and I get made to feel like I'm some sort of lower life form if I don't agree. I have never been to the same hairdresser twice in the last 10 years because I end up with this awful Jennifer cut.

I always end up asking myself these questions afterwards.

Why do hairdressers use the thinning scissors on curly/wavy/frizz-prone hair?

Why don't hairdressers bloody listen ? Or- what should i be doing differently besides relying on photoes which they seem to ignore ? Are there any special terms that I need to use to get them to listen apart from NOT the Jennifer A. look? I repeat-Showing a photo does NOT work.

What it is with the feathery jagged edge ends? I dont like it (on me).

Why do they expect me to blow dry my hair to make it flat when I have clearly wavy/curly hair?

When are teach hairdressers going to learn new haircuts, besides the Jennifer?

If any MNetters have answers to these please share - but not if it involves using a blowdryer or spending money on antifrizz/keratin stuff for my hair.

I feel your pain Kelpeed. I too am cursed blessed with thick wiry frizzy hell hair and get totally conflicting advice from different hairdressers. Usually they layer it and try and feather it round the face but I put a stop to that quick smart.

Last time though, the hairdresser cut it in a blunt chin length bob and although it needs a run through with the straightening irons when washed, I am hopeless at blow drying - surely you need an extra set of hands?! It can look quite nice now.

Have you got any friends with similar hair which looks nice who can recommend a hairdresser?

I totally agree. I get the same hair cut no matter who I go to. And I always have my hair straightened within an inch of its life. Which I have no intention of doing on a daily basis. There is never a discussion about what to do with 'my' hair. Just an opportunity to make my hair temporarily look like everyone else's.

ClaudiaS your suggestion for word of mouth recomendations is good and yep, I'm forever on the look out. BUT my pal with similar hair uses a hairdresser on the other side of town (about an hour's drive each way). I am keeping my ears peeled for a hairdresser closer to me. I have found a few but they have moved away. sigh.

It just seems to me the wavy/curly/frizz prone hair people seem to have less choices in hairdressers unless they go with a straight hair style which requires more effort every single day to make and keep it straight -which is not its preferred state. Which brings me back to the point about hairdressers learning how to produce a style which is allowed to be wavy/curly rather than dead straight as per the Jennifer Aniston look as per link.

So. why do I seem to always come out of hairdressers with the Jennifer haircut when i show them the above cuts? What am I doing wrong? Are all these cuts the same cut as the Jennifer? Are thinning scissors used for these?

Products really are my friend. Also shit hair like ours does need a bit of work (or a 'fuck you' attitude when I can't be arsed to style it - or indeed a hat for really bad days). I think all of those styles you linked to were layered and drenched in balms, oils and waxes and then tonged to within an inch of their lives.

I use Morroccan oil (love the smell) and then a light straighten followed by a tiny bit of smoothing wax or I end up looking like this nb this is not me!

i have frizzy/curly nightmare hair but my hairdresser (and my old one when I lived elsewhere) have always listened, understood and made it look fab. I'd keep shopping around and suggest talking to them but not taking pictures with you to confuse them

It's because hairdressers are not trained to cut curly hair. They are trained to wet it and comb it straight which makes it really hard to cut it into a style that will suit it curly.

Older/ more experiences/ more senior hairdressers are usually better (although more expensive) than younger ones who have just been taught 99 ways to cut straigt hair. They just don't know what to do so they revert to Jennifer Anniston.

There are hairdressers who can cut curly. Ask when you make an appointment, who is good at curly hair styles. If they say "everyone" then walk away. Look ou for stylists with curly hair. Or best of all ask anyone you see with good curly hair who cuts it.

Emphasise when you get it cut that you are not going to blow dry it at home and they should not blow dry it - this should at least make it clear that you want a style which looks good everyday not just temporarily.

I have naturally curly hair which I now straighten out of choice lol! When it was curly though I found my hairdressers were great.

Do you go with curly hair ie they can see your natural curl before they start?

Bit 80s but do you have a diffuser? Mouse or curly cream and dry upside down with diffuser is quite low maintenance really even with my straight cut my hair goes super curly like this. If I want loose lovely waves however I find I have to straighten or curling tongues to get like some of those pics you linked to, my curls are naturally wild!

I feel your pain OP. Most hairdressers are clueless with curls. I agree that thinning scissors are evil. I have a fab hairdresser (after 20 years of shit ones!), she's in East London, don't know if that's any good to you, happy to PM you with details

I have the exact same problem! I now refuse to allow a hairdresser to use thinning scissors on my hair as they just make my hair split and go twice as frizzy. Generally now if I book in with a new salon/stylist I say at the time of booking that I don't want thinning scissors used. If they moan or start giving me 101 reasons to use them then I just don't book there.

Yes I have the same problem! I walk into the hairdressers with my extremely thick, curly hair, say 'Please don't cut the layers too short, it really bounces up' and they never seem to believe me! I have been to expensive hairdressers and IME they are the worst because,as others have said, they are trained to cut straight hair, and people who want straight hair. I feel like I have had a personality change with straight hair, as well as it taking about an hour to straighten. I don't want straight hair!

I now go to a cheap Turkish hairdressers now. I think Greek and Turkish hair is quite thick and sometimes curly, so the hairdressers know how to cut it properly. I live in North London though, where they have a large Greek and Turkish community, so easy to find.

I have thick frizzy hair and it really needs either straighteners or curling tong to look its best. I have mine cut blunt but then thinned for the last couple of inches but ONLY in a 'sandwich' layer so not underneath where I might tie it up and not on the top so it looks all the same length. Layers are awful on me but this way it looks smooth but not triangular.

Oh god I'm stressing now because I've got my first hair appt in over a year booked for 10.30 this morning and I'm shitting it! My hair is curly too but I've only started wearing it curly in the last year so I've no idea what to ask for now.

I have got an appt with an 'older gentleman' who has promised me he knows about curly hair so I'm putting my life in his hands. Will report back later & let you know what he's done.

I don't mean to offend anyone on here who's a hairdresser, as I'm sure not all hairdressers are like this, but in general most of the hairdressers I have been to have all had a slightly superior attitude. The kind of attitude where they think I can't possibly know what I want for my own hair, and that they know best. Almost a judgemental, sneery way about them.

My hair gets very split by thinning scissors, and I've then been to other hairdressers who've moaned at me and lectured me about the condition of my hair, when it was fine before the dreaded thinning scissors. And the fact that I generally have to use straighteners on it because of the cut doesnt' help its condition either.

1. My hair might look 'only' wavy but that's because it's long and the weight keeps it under control. I have to lay down the law at the hairdressers to not layer it too short as it just springs up like a telephone cable.

2. No hairdryers or diffusers can go within a mile of my hair. Sometimes, despite me asking them not to a hairdresser thinks a diffusers will give me lovely swooshy curls. They are always proved wrong <rolly eyes, frizzy hair smug face>. I can cope leaving the salon with damp hair tied back, I'm not going to get a chill!