Where do I stand? (WWAD?)

Like many of you, the last 12 hours have left me in a strange place. It’s clear that a war is coming and people are starting to choose their side. Lines are being drawn. To many it’s a clear cut decision. To me, not so much.

It likely surprised you to see me in the belly of The Resistance. It surprised me even more. Do I believe in burning everything the OSDM stands for to the ground? That would be a clear no.

So where do I actually stand? The short answer is I stand where I’ve always stood. I stand with Anoch. I believe he is the only light and truth that has ever been gifted to this wonderful community.

Have we been showered with lies and deception? That’s undeniable from both sides. @111error lured us in with the same type of deceit that has been so prevalent within certain factions of the OSDM.

It’s clear to me that there is still good within the OSDM. Although it may seem Sabrina returned to us out of some selfish need for attention, I know she returned to us because of how strong her connection to Anoch is. She was and still is the purest source of my salvation.

But this isn’t the facet of the OSDM we’re being presented with. Some of you may have found transparency in @joycecarlberg, but all I’ve found is a woman following orders in an attempt at keeping whatever power she has within the organization. This fight isn’t about power. It’s about salvation. I tried to reach out and ascertain where her actual beliefs lie and have found nothing but jokes and tricks. That’s not belief. All she provides is a distraction that is keeping us from what should be our true goal, the resurrection of Anoch in the flesh.

Do I stand against @joycecarlberg? Unabashedly so. But I do not stand against the OSDM as a whole. I stand with those who seek to return the OSDM to the true believers. Those who seek the light of Anoch and not a selfish need for power.

I do not want to burn the OSDM to the ground, but I do believe we need to surgically remove the rotting elements currently within.

So where does that leave me?

At the moment I find myself with a need to stand with those who stand against those same elements. But I do so not out of passion. I do so with a conscience. With faith.

I will assist in the destruction of those who stand in the way of Anoch. And that leaves me to use my particular skill set in the aid of The Resistance.

But keep in mind, the OSDM are not my enemy. Those within the OSDM who remain committed to the resurrection of Anoch will always have an ally in me. And I remain always an open ear to their needs when they call out to me. But I will not stand by and watch the ideals I stand for rot in the name of power.

@kasch Now yer talkin’. You don’t need to sign a loyalty pledge to make your own choices. You’re not obligated to choose a color.

Apologies for a wall of text stream of consciousness, but…

Personally, I found every single character introduced prior to this to be morally repugnant, and utterly unappealing. It was frustrating to watch everyone else choosing a path, while I sit here, and think “All these paths are completely unattractive to me.” I observed everyone else playing a game that they seemed to enjoy, and thought “Why is this so painfully dull for me?” Why wasn’t there a path for someone who wanted to be a little less…credulous? I’m ecstatic that there is a “Resistance”. It’s about goddamned time there was a path other than “Why, yes, I adore Kool-aid. I’d love another glass.” I didn’t know the midnight commission thing was happening. I don’t follow the ARG scene as closely as many, I had no idea it was even happening. If I had, it sounds like the sort of thing that I might have signed up for. Am I butthurt that I didn’t know about it? No. Am I butthurt that I’ve never once received any interaction from the Creators in any way? No. Am I upset that about 10 people get 80% of the interaction in this game? No. They try harder. They’re more “reliable” than I am. Am I upset that someone else got an interaction I didn’t? No, that pretty much describes this entire game for me.

I’ll never be @julierei, eagerly stuffing an Anoch Pie down my gullet. I find that story line totally, and utterly unsatisfying. Maybe she feels differently. Maybe she enjoys the path she’s on. That’s cool. I detest it, but it doesn’t make me feel any animosity towards her as an individual. She’s just playing a different scenario. In-game, I’ll roll my eyes, and mock her choices, but out-of-game, it’s her own damned choice. I’m going to be more careful in how I “disagree” with another player than an NPC, because a player has real feelings to hurt, and an NPC doesn’t. I’ll mock @joycecarlberg personally, because I don’t care if she gets her feelings hurt, but I know Julie is a real person, so I’m going to be more considerate in that interaction. She’s gonna do things that I find distasteful, that’s the game, not @julierei.

I came into Tension late, and never got into the BoS shenanigans early on. I wanted an opponent of the OSDM to ally with, but BoS was actually just OSDM in different skin, a fact which became apparent right about the same time I arrived. So, I didn’t feel a connection to BoS, they felt like frauds too. I still see no reason to “trust” that this BOS is not a deception as well. It doesn’t change how I’ve felt from the very beginning though. I still don’t want to drink OSDM’s kool-aid, regardless of the flavor. I still don’t want to join Noah’s sycophant circus. I still don’t want to be Sarah’s lapdog. Otis is about as interesting as paint drying. I don’t really have a clue where Sabrina’s at, so I’m not sure if I’m with her, or not…likely not. I don’t respect OSDM, I *loathe* everything that it stands for. Maybe other people find enjoyment in just letting go, and being the lapdog for a while. Maybe others really do just want to explore their feelings and emotions in different situations, and gain some personal insight, or enjoyment from that. I dunno, that’s their problem. What I enjoy is the idea of being able to go after a cult in in all the ways that I *couldn’t* antagonize a *real* one, because I’d get my ass sued off. I can do things to OSDM that I could, and would *never* do to Scientology. I think that’s delightful. That’s just me though, I fully expect my viewpoint to be in the extreme minority. I want to engage in some shenanigans, fuck some shit up, and have a good time doing it.

I like @111error, I find his point of view to be agreeable to me. He’s a damn sight more interesting, and likeable than some douche like Noah, Sarah, or a loveable oaf like Otis. Do I “Trust” him? Fuck nah. Is it because I don’t trust @111error? No, it’s because I don’t trust the game. Maybe he just *thinks* he’s the leader of the resistance, and really reports to Horace. Fuck if I know.

So, I believe in Resistance, not “The Resistance”. I will follow a path that feels *right*, and satisfying to myself. I know what I believe in, and the only “side” I’m on is MINE. I don’t need permission, or an invitation from anyone to be there. To the extent that “The Resistance” finds itself in congruence with my own point of view, I’m willing to support, participate, and encourage it. If it ends up being another OSDM-in-costume deal, then whatever, there are always more matches to be found. Am I going to “Trust” “The Resistance”? Probably not, because trust is earned, it doesn’t come with the title.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned through this, it’s Trust No One. If you expect to not be manipulated, or deceived, you haven’t been paying attention. Literally *EVERYTHING* that has happened to you, or with you in Tension, or Lust has involved manipulation, and deception. Get used to it. Maybe instead of being butthurt at getting manipulated, turn on those spidey senses, and stop allowing yourselves to be so damned easy to manipulate. Maybe stop being so willing to believe everything you read, and leap at every offer presented to you. Maybe there’s a life-lesson to be learned in there somewhere.

I’ve been sitting here this whole time thinking “Man, I really hope they put a plant in the community, it sure would spice things up.” I’ve been expecting it. I would have been disappointed if there wasn’t one. I really genuinely don’t understand how anyone is at all surprised. Personally, I’m happy that it turned out to be someone I find delightful, and unexpected.

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice…

If any of you are genuinely upset at @111error for any of this, why? Because he didn’t give you spoilers? Because something happened that you didn’t know about? Because you didn’t get to participate in a single event? Because another player was told not to tell you something, and followed instructions? Because there is a path that’s going to be in opposition to the 8 million current flavors of “The Kool-Aid Gang”? What’s yer beef? Not how do you feel, what, specifically, are you angry about?

Ok. So. BOS was created by the OSDM right? But then *we* made it real.

As a group. Not one individual, claiming to speak for the rest of us.

The Resistance is not BOS.
Morgan is NOT BOS.
No-one is BOS as a singular person.
No-one speaks for BOS without everyone being in agreement.

I put a lot of faith in The Resistance only to find they do not speak to me or for me. They claim the name of something they were never a part of and pick a “leader” based on what? Someone, please, enlighten me.

My BOS tattoo – the top of the hourglass remains open. Because it never ends for me. I have never closed it off, never said “that is in the past”. I still oppose the OSDM. And if I have to do that alone, then so be it.

I like the mission of The Resistance, but not feeling their vibe. Not a fan of passive aggressive Joyce Carlsberg, but she is amusing. Not super religious, so not feeling Anoch’s light (sorry Julie). I’ll never be a “fuck everything” person. I like Noah and The Sinclairs, but not sure they even have a team? If I’m to truly follow my heart, I guess I’ll just be optimistically open to what’s to come. Hopefully, that means I can still play. Because this truly is a wild ride!

The Resistance is not going to win me over by showing me that one of my best friends was secretly its leader this entire time. That’s equal or even more heinous than the shit the OSDM has pulled.

Let’s say that you’re right and allying yourself with a group dedicated to “exposing the truth” is the correct side:

The BOS had ideals and were ready to throw themselves on the sword only to find that they were under the same umbrella as the OOA. Stacey had ideals about her iConfidant program and it blew up in her face. Why should I believe this to be any different? Institutions are corruptible, and if this one isn’t now, it will only be a matter of time before its leaders or its members start in-fighting and outside forces seize control. Hell, already @julierei is talking about Anoch-worshipping Resistance fighters. That’ll fit in well with my “Atheists for Jesus” book club.

I can rant about how I have ideals till I’m blue in the face. But I’m not gonna smugly pat myself on the back and call myself a free-thinker when I’m blind to the totalitarian monolith that lurks over all of this.

To recap:

– I’ve been manipulated and used as a puppet by iConfidant, Joyce, the Resistance and the OSDM.
– One of my closest and best friends was not who he said he was.
– Jenna is gone yet again and most likely dead.
– Both sides are throwing up smoke and mirrors so fast, I don’t even know how to keep track of anything anymore.

That’s why, as of now, #TeamFE is the only thing that makes sense. Cause I sure as hell don’t know how to make another move in this game. Not after this.

It’s like Game of Thrones – We all know how this will end: With a bunch of corpses piled around an empty Iron Throne. Or like last year, a blood covered stage for Anoch.

I don’t think “exposing the truth” is the “correct” side, it’s just my side. It’s what I identify with.

I think there’s a distiction between “BOS” the faction, and the players who aligned themselves with BOS. When I say “BOS was a fraud”, obviously I’m talking about the group, not the people who had it tattooed on their wrist. I don’t mean that @blondie is a fraud, and I don’t judge her affiliation, or affection, or whatever it is she feels about BOS, even if it’s wholly different than how I feel. When I say OSDM is a fraud, it doesn’t mean I think @julierei is a fraud. Conflict with a faction is not the same thing as conflict with the members of that faction.

Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between people being in-game butthurt, and out-of-game butthurt. It’s hard to tell if someone is upset that their friend betrayed them, or if they’re “upset” that their “friend” “betrayed” them. Weird shit happens in that space in between the lines.

It feels pretty ironic to me, being a member of #TeamFE from day one. To me, that was *obviously* the only team worth being on from the start. Imagine how perplexing it is to see everyone eagerly jumping on board the Noah/Sarah Crazytown Express while sitting here thinking “Are you fucking mental? Do you not see what’s happening here?” Of course, you do see it, you’re not idiots, you’re playing a game too, that’s just the line you chose to play for your own personal reasons. None of you are genuinely “fooled” by The System, OOG.

Even now, the “faction” I was waiting for arrived, and I’ll subscribe to the newsletter, but it hasn’t earned my trust. It literally did nothing more than announce its existence. I sure as shit don’t consider myself “BOS” now, and probably never will. I’ll probably always hold it at arms length to “protect/insulate” myself, because what I *EXPECT* is betrayal.

Popping in here to confirm your suspicions – the WWAD in the title DOES in fact stand for “What Would Addison Do.” I explained elsewhere I stand with The Resistance.

@kasch – On your first point, I understand where you’re coming from 100%. But think about what would’ve happened if Morgan had opened himself up earlier. We know the OSDM was keeping tabs on him – the resistance would’ve been blow up before it had enough followers. Now he’s stepped forward, but if anything happens, the movement has already started.

I mean, you know Morgan. He’s a stubborn shit. He’s perfect for this position – His distaste for identifying himself in social media? His loyalty to friends and causes? His certain flair for the dramatic? Sounds like a good fit for the new face of the resistance.

You don’t need to have a side, and you’re right – we’ve experienced firsthand the dangers of fully committing to an entity or organization. But having convictions and the willingness to take the actions necessary in the name of these convictions is what matters most. Alliances such as the resistance empower and amplify these convictions.

If saying “fuck everything” is the best course of action for you, then keep fighting the good fight the way you need to. If you discover that you’re not getting done what you need to get done, reconsider your options.

I know these are all things you know, but there are no doubt countless others that are in this same boat that may not have considered this.

There’s no doubt that this is a game we’ll all lose. But if death is inevitable, we might as well die for something we believe in.

Okay, so here’s my thing. Sometimes I feel like people get so caught up in the excitement of immersive theater and this experience that these situations go too far.
This is a game.
This is not a war.
This is not a court.
This is a game.
Both sides have changed their positions on certain things throughout Tension and Lust. Both sides have had people meander in and out of them. Both sides will have events, provide exciting experiences, and contribute to the story line. At the end of the day, Lust is one entity and these are merely factions within it; different ways of getting to what will ultimately be the same ending (and by same I mean freakishly personalized and life scarring if Ascension was any indicator). So to me, at least as circumstances stand at this very moment, it feels more like someone is asking “Dude, you want the top hat or the thimble?” Regardless of what you choose, we’re all still playing on the same board.
I don’t think a plot twist is worth passive-aggressively attacking someone’s character over. There are simply more important things in life, period.

I don’t know if I like it and feeling that is alright. However, here is an interesting position in being an uncalled: No one’s asked for my loyalties. I don’t have to be premature. From the system as a Maybe, from Registration as an unsigned piece of paper, becoming aware of Midnight Commission too late, I’ve been this gray, incorporeal thing, haunting around Lust. Now I’m rattling a chain or two.

Generally, everyone has been so welcoming, encouraging and kind. @111error is/was/am/will be, a fun, engaging guy. @meghanmayhem is down for the rabblerousing. @confuseddude dude, people felt for him. I like @bcbishop, @taysavestheday, @wanda102, @kevin, they’re real people, who I’ve met, solved puzzles with and had laughs. @coryphella reached out to me when I was posting less. (@julierei, you’re cemented stance is wild and entirely your own category <3) And I’ll say it, I didn’t hate the @hazelverse/@despoina disruption. And now, like oil and water, they’re eventually sliding away from one another towards the edges of the Petri dish.

A war of both identity and mysticism is coming: the revived BOS is the knight to slay the OSDM dragon? The OSDM, the enlightenment to the willing BOS darkness? But -what- is the cause. To stop Anoch? To Raise Anoch in someone else’s ideal? Salt the earth? Corrupt the data? Assimilate the rebellious children? Crush Insubordinate? I feel as if Pespi and Coke have the very same cooperate messages: Annihilation of the enemy.

Is that it? Is that what we’re picking to do? Who can kill each other with the sharpest sticks, in the best, most crisply-ironed suits, first?

Lust is redefining Alternate Realities: Have people been elevated, were they plants, are they meta-employees from the start? I feel as if some are asking: Is any of it sincere? If so, then the product of Lust is wild, blurring the line of participant and collaborator. If not, people are going to feel wildly betrayed because some here, have very, very deep investments. People have tattoos of this. I get and understand that feeling of duplicity: but did anyone sign up to be legitimately hurt, or had they expected to be hurt only in a theatrical sense?

We can’t kill each other, because we’ll only end up dead for all our efforts. No dead person is ever more right than the next. I’ve never heard of a two chapter book and more pieces of the puzzle are coming. I don’t know how to play any more, but I know I still want to.

Team Joyce, Team Resistance, Team Bishop, Team 111error, Team Noah, Team Sarah, Team Otis, Team Horace, Team Stacy, Team Mayhem, Team Investor ect ect ect. So many teams. So many alliances. I choose Team @joycecarlberg even though the only words she has sputtered to me were “Uh-Uh”, why? Because I enjoyed my time with them last year. Its because of them that I am left with this movie in my brain that is being played on a constant repeat. This endless loop of amazing what ifs. I choose @joycecarlberg to preserve this loop. I choose @joycecarlberg even though the “Tens” think they are playing us “Twos”. That its not really about your moral fiber. All that matters is which dotted lines you sign. Alliances are great because there is power in numbers, but in the end, there can be only one.

Whew. This is quite a wild mix to jump back into. There appears to be alot more options than those available last year.
I am totally not up to date and have attempted to catch up as best I can but, Im afraid I am to far behind to make any alliances at this point in time.
I never did much like anything that is in the way of unity. Or at least things that cause segregation.

Team FE, I remember that. Second gen fence sitters club. What was the real OG club again?
The Wild Stallions? The Lone Anarchistos… hmm. What I do remember is that there was many popcorn flavors picked out for the observing.

The BOS, the OSDM up to their same old tricks it appears. Is there even really a difference? Last year leaves that open for debate. It seems that some think so. They may be right, who knows.
logic VS faith, material VS spiritual.
Science/psychology VS religion.
I feel that someday our scientific knowledge will reach a point where the metaphors of religions will be explained by science itself. Developments in our understanding of quantum mechanics and quantum physics is a teaser for what is to come.
I swear no allegiances. No fucks given.
🖖