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Finances and annoying habits tied as top sources of relationship stress

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Tuesday, February 6, 2018 (9:00am)

According to a new survey by SunTrust Bank, people who are in relationships are more than twice as likely to claim that they are a saver but their partner is a spender. According to the findings, finances are tied with annoying habits (both at 24 percent) as the top stressors among couples who experience relationship stress. One in seven people have even ended a relationship over money. SunTrust conducted the survey as part of its ongoing effort to understand consumer attitudes toward money and help people take a step toward financial confidence through the onUp Movement.

ATLANTA, Feb. 6, 2018 /PRNewswire/ -- People who are in relationships are more than twice as likely to claim that they are a saver but their partner is a spender, according to a new survey by SunTrust Banks, Inc. (NYSE: STI). Twenty-eight percent of 1,339 people surveyed said that they are a saver and their partner is a spender, but only 13 percent admitted that they are a spender and their partner is a saver.

SunTrust conducted the survey as part of its ongoing effort to understand consumer attitudes toward money and help people take a step toward financial confidence through the onUp Movement.

The SunTrust study suggests that differing views about spending lead to relationship stress. According to the findings, finances are tied with annoying habits (both at 24 percent) as the top stressors among couples who experience relationship stress. One in seven people have even ended a relationship over money.

"People are prone to view their spending as necessary, but a partner's spending as excessive," said Brian Nelson Ford, financial well-being executive at SunTrust. "Seeing the same purchase from two totally different perspectives creates the perfect environment for stress and arguments to happen."

For some couples, the solution is separate accounts. SunTrust's research found that 57 percent of couples keep at least some of their accounts separate. Within this group, more than a quarter (27 percent) said they did it to prevent fights about money.

"Arguments about money are really disagreements about what a couple values," Ford said. "Instead of going straight into a conversation about money with your partner, begin with a deep dive into what's important to each of you, whether it's travel, a comfortable retirement or buying a home. If you can agree on those things, it's a lot easier to agree on where your money should be spent."

Ford suggests considering these five questions when starting a productive conversation about money to help couples become more financially confident:

What do you value most? Talk about your main priorities in life. The ones that overlap will be easier to save for since both of you will be motivated to achieve them. However, take note of your differences. That's where financial conflict can enter the relationship.

What's your money history? Be open about your financial successes and failures. Transparency about financial decisions that are still impacting you today can go a long way toward building trust. From student loans to credit card debt, poor credit or even a really smart investment decision, open up about your financial past.

Do you have specific financial goals? Once you've covered your values and current financial situation, it's time to talk about specific goals. Whether you want to buy a home with your partner or add to your nest egg before having a baby, write down each of your financial objectives separately – and then compare them with your partner's list.

Do you want to combine accounts? Candidly discuss the reservations you have about combining bank accounts. Do you trust the other person to spend responsibly? Are you trying to maintain some independence? Are your incomes significantly different? The answers to these questions will impact how ready you are to have joint accounts.

What's your limit? If you decide to combine accounts, agree in advance to talk about purchases over a certain dollar amount. Ask your partner: When do I need to check with you before making a purchase? Having that conversation can prevent future conflict.

Visit onUp.com for more financial insights delivered through articles, videos, calculators and inspirational stories. The onUp.com site is the heart of the onUp Movement, which is inspiring and empowering people to achieve financial confidence.

Methodology: SunTrust completed this quarterly online survey with 2,500 individuals (among whom 1,339 indicated being in a marriage or domestic partnership), representative of the U.S. adult population that is large enough to address Americans of different ages, incomes and geographic regions. Final results are weighted to ensure representativeness nationally by age, gender, race and income.

SunTrust Banks, Inc. is a purpose-driven company dedicated to Lighting the Way to Financial Well-Being for the people, businesses, and communities it serves. Headquartered in Atlanta, the Company has two business segments: Consumer and Wholesale. Its flagship subsidiary, SunTrust Bank, operates an extensive branch and ATM network throughout the high-growth Southeast and Mid-Atlantic states, along with 24-hour digital access. Certain business lines serve consumer, commercial, corporate, and institutional clients nationally. As of December 31, 2017, SunTrust had total assets of $206 billion and total deposits of $161 billion. The Company provides deposit, credit, trust, investment, mortgage, asset management, securities brokerage, and capital market services. SunTrust leads onUp, a national movement inspiring Americans to build financial confidence. Join the movement at onUp.com.

"SunTrust Advisors" may be officers and/or associated persons of the following affiliates of SunTrust Banks, Inc.: SunTrust Bank, our commercial bank, which provides banking, trust and asset management services; SunTrust Investment Services, Inc., an SEC registered investment adviser and broker-dealer, which is a member of FINRA and SIPC, and a licensed insurance agency, and which provides securities, annuities and life insurance products, and other investment services.

SunTrust Robinson Humphrey is the trade name for the corporate and investment banking services of SunTrust Banks, Inc. and its subsidiaries, including SunTrust Robinson Humphrey, Inc., member FINRA and SIPC.