I’m Going To Let My Daughter Read Crappy Vampire Teen Romance Novels

Let me start with a disclaimer. I hate “Twilight”. I like to think this is an informed opinion, since I read all of the books in one sitting one weekend when our wi-fi was down. I teeter back and forth between mocking Stephanie Meyer and trying to figure out her formula for all those dolla dolla bills, ya’ll.

The book is rife with abusive themes, creepy stalker moments, nonconsensual kissing, boring prose, and heavy handed anti-sex, anti-choice messages, which pretty much sums up the opposite of what I want my daughter to absorb. Especially boring prose.

Still, I will let her read it—nay, encourage her to read it!–if she so desires.

My daughter is at that age. The age where “The Wheels on The Bus” and Wow! Wow! Wubbzy! no longer appeal, and I’ve been woefully unprepared.

She’s begun to like a lot of stuff I don’t necessarily approve of: pop music with suggestive lyrics that she doesn’t quite understand, crappy shows like Winx Club, and chapter book series that can only be described as inane considering that they revolve around either the entire thesaurus entry for “fart” or magical wish granting kittens.

I stepped into Justice for the first time ever and almost had a sequin-induced seizure from the way the lights hit a rhinestone emblazoned peace sign dress. Certainly, the One Direction techno-club-house remix radio edit didn’t help.

Ugh. My 9yo is an avid reader, so we’re struggling to find stuff that entertains and challenges her while not being chock full of flighty Tweens and mini skirts. So far she’s really into the Percy Jackson stuff by Rick Riordan, and is delving into Greek/Roman history and mythology as a result…so we’ve staved off Twilight a little while longer.

http://Mommyish.com/ Eve Vawter

we are all about the time traveling fashionista at present with my nine year old, and any books on the Titanic

Natasha B

Who is this time traveling fashionista??? Share! She’s burning through books faster than the library can supply her!

Will have to check these out, it’s good to mix fluff with the heavy. Momma don’t want no uncool snob!

Bunny Lucia

Books on the Titanic and about Egypt were my two FAVOURITE things around that age.

Has she seen Ghosts of the Abyss yet?

GPMeg

I’m pushing Rick Riordan on my Camp kids like cheap drugs — they’re really in to them and since I have a mild obsession with Greek/Roman/Egyptian mythology they now think I’m super cool. Double win!

Natasha B

I know, I was totally obsessed with mythology when younger so (confession) I eat those books up as fast as she does..”

GPMeg

YESSSSSS — our entire staff has read them all, we love them!

Tinyfaeri

Norse, too!

gothicgaelicgirl

what about the Nile books?

Tea

Try Kenneth Oppel’s stuff if she reads at that level yet. He has a fun steampunk series (Start with Airborn) with a very good main female character

Natasha B

Ah I had head of the Silverwing set but not the rest, will def have to add them to the list! Thaaaank you!!!

bl

It’s YA but I found Etiquette and Espionage quite good. It’s the first book ina series of 2 so far about girls boarding school for spy/secret agent type training disguised as a finishing school. Set ina very cool Victorian steampunk world. I think the main character is a teen but it read a little young so it might be good for a 9 year old book lover.

xvala

Yes. This. Forever. 8D

libraryofbird

Nancy Drew and Boxcar Children. A bit old fashioned but they are still favorites of mine.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

I have to steer clear of Orphan-y type stuff. My daughter knows I grew up in what was essentially an orphanage, and despite my best efforts, gets me mixed up with Sophie from the BFG or Annie. It creeps her out.

gothicgaelicgirl

wow that’s an odd connection, may I ask how she came to think this?
Hope this doesn’t sound insensitive…
I had my girls convinced I was the Girl with the Dragon tattoo due to all my facial piercings and spiky hair haha

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

#HDY???

Nah just kidding I’ll tell you. But first you need to understand that my kid has a lot of feelings. So she’s never sad so much as she’s UNCONTROLLABLY WEEPING WITH DESPAIR. So one time when she was 4 we watched a Christmas special where a little girl was in an orphanage and the headmistress or whatever incinerated the little girl’s doll. This like, destroyed my daughter. She could not handle it at all. FOR DAYS. So in an attempt to separate fact from fiction I told her how I grew up and actually my housemom was superduper nice, etc. Instead of focusing on how orphanages aren’t scary, she focused on how I was in one. I’ve been meaning to sort this out, but it’s a very heavy convo to have.

gothicgaelicgirl

Jesus my heart stopped there, I got scared I’d totally offended you lol.
We got the DOOM DESPAIR ALL HOPE IS LOST stage too. I believe it was Bieber breaking up with Gomez that had the 10 year old sobbing that she hated everything.
That does sound like a tough conversation to try lead in to alright, I don’t envy you! However, if you’re this open and approachable online, I’m sure you’ll have no trouble with it. =)

Natasha B

Ahhh they were my favs! She’s read several, and some Hardy Boys.

http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

The Vesper Holly books by Lloyd Alexander, maybe? Victorian orphan adventurer? Should be around the right age range, too, as I recall. Man, did I want to be Vesper (except for the orphan part, natch).

Natasha B

Ok, I am making a list. So many good ideas.

Lee

From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler will forever be one of my favorite books. I was around 8 or 9 the first time I read it.

Emily

And if you like that, try The Westing Game. And Harriet the Spy.

TheGiantPeach

I just reread The Westing Game. It’s one of my all-time favorites.

Ddaisy

LOVE the Westing Game!

Natasha B

She read that last year and loved it, it’s def one of my all time favorites, and fueled a love of museums.

http://www.ambiencechaser.com/ Elizabeth Licata

Half Magic and Five Children and It were pretty great at that age.

gothicgaelicgirl

The Spiderwick Chronicles!
Inkheart
The Doomspell trilogy
The Series of Unfortunate Events
The Secret of the Ruby Ring is deadly too

Invader Tak

How about the Wrinkle in Time series by Madeleine L’engle? Or is that too advanced? I can’t remember how old I was when I read it.

Princess

Hanson. Not Hansen. Hanson.

Great article otherwise

Alexandra

I’m super worried about this – not because of me – but because of my “seriously pearl-clutching” mother who is going to be living with us and essentially the nanny for my kids (to which I owe her HUGE, I understand that!). However, I just hope she’s relaxed a bit since my childhood.
Example: I wasn’t allowed to go to a b-day sleepover I was invited to because they were showing Dirty Dancing and I was 11 1/2, not 13. [It was rated PG-13 for those who don't remember]. Problem – ALL my friends were going. I can still say that – I wasn’t being a whiny kid, it was seriously embarrassing. Better option maybe would have been for my mom to watch the movie and tackle some of the themes with me in a discussion (abortion, etc). rather than making me the only kid in my group to not be able to go…..
Hopefully she’s mellowed a bit!!

FormerlyKnownAsWendy

Figure out how to make book covers or buy some……

gothicgaelicgirl

lol I specifically bought leather slip covers for some of my erotica when I was a teen.
All my father said was- “Ooh those Victorian dust jackets are LOVELY!”
While I went back to Beauty’s Punishment. =P what can I say, I love Anne Rice

FormerlyKnownAsWendy

Hahaha. Amazing!

gothicgaelicgirl

sadly my father found the ONE Hentai book I had and threw it out.
I wouldn’t mind, I only bought it cos I found it in a jumble sale, saw it was autographed by the author and after buying it for €2 (!) googled it, saw it was worth a good bit of money.
He saw it as cartoon smut and threw it out lol so I lost out on a good sale. =( Didn’t even get to read it to see what the fuss was about

FormerlyKnownAsWendy

My Dad threw Tim Allen’s Don’t Stand too Close to a Naked Man (his autobiography) into our fireplace because it was smut. There is a whole bit in there about how he had changed his last name from Dick to Allen when he got famous and how he has an uncle named Richard Dick (they called him double dick). Dad was like THIS IS SMUT!!!! I thought it was funny as hell. Ahhhh, Dads.

gothicgaelicgirl

Your dad is a legend!

Alexandra

Also, whatever happened to Sweet Valley High and Babysitters Club type books?

Natasha B

I saved all my BC books they’re in my daughter’s room.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

Can we just talk about The Saddle Club for like one minute? Lovesies.

Kay_Sue

I spent years with my nose buried in book after book from the Saddle Club. Also the Thoroughbred series….<3

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

I wanted to be Stevie so bad. Not that stuck up bitch Lisa though.

Natasha B

Oh my gosh Stevie!!! Yes!!! I love that my 9yo and I can dish over those books

Natasha B

Also, there were some episodes of Saddle Club on netflix for a bit!

Alicia Kiner

Sweet Valley High, I’m not sure about, but BSC you can still buy at bookstores. We have a couple second hand type stores around us that get them too, but Borders and Barnes and Noble still carry them.

Jayess

Try Discworld, The Tiffany Aching series is: 1. hilarious 2. feminist 3. well-written and 4. good for the tween demographic.

Basically: young girl decides to be a witch (emphasis on “decides”). Beans a monster with a frying pan. Has further adventures assisted by tiny “faeries” that are actually basically miniature Scottish brawlers.

Paul White

I read those….pretty good books

Natasha B

Love the sound of these, will have to Check them out. She loved Harry Potter.

gothicgaelicgirl

great fantasy lover here!
Try find the Divide, and Return to the Divide. Great for kids.
Also, The Doomspell trilogy, and Inkheart, and of course, Stardust!

Jayess

Stardust!!

Tinyfaeri

YES! to anything Terry Pratchett!

http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

Pterry also wrote “Nation” for the YA audience, which has both a male and female protagonist and is sweet and funny and perfect (like pretty much everything Pterry does)

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

How did I miss these? I’ve been pushing His Dark Materials, but trying to read them out loud I’m like ohhhhh yeah these are super boring I forgot.

Natasha B

I liked Phillip Pullman’s Golden Compass trilogy way better than Dark Material…I keep trying to push them on my daughter but she hasn’t gotten too into it yet.

gothicgaelicgirl

THE WEE FREE MEN!

WHUR’S THE KELDA?!

Jayess

Oh! And Kiki Strike! 5 girl band with different skills teams up to be a middle-school crime fighting, puzzle solving strike force! But, like, actually amazing!

My parents’ theory when I was a kid was, “if she’s reading, she can read whatever she wants.” This led to a pretty intense horror phase – I started on Stephen King in 4th grade. My Catholic school teachers weren’t too happy, but it worked! I learned to love reading and still read a lot (both high and low brow stuff). Encouraging reading is good; you (or she) can tweak what she reads later.

Natasha B

My parents had the same theory….so basically I was reading John Grisham and Scruples at 10….anyone remember Scruples? Sex and anorexia allll up in it. Also Danielle Steele, gag. My taste has thankfully evolved.

DeanaCal

Oh yeah, right there with ya reading Danielle Steele at 10 – yikes! But my parents had the rule that any written word in our house was fair game, as long as we were reading. I wasn’t toooooo damaged by Ms. Steele. Can’t get through more than 5 pages of her stuff now, though.

Oh my gosh!!! Scruples – yes! I’m not going to lie I still love Scruples… any suggestions for anything else similar to it? I adore trashy sexy family mama drama billionaire reads! *hangs head in shame*

Natasha B

Ah they were fun. Um, besides Danielle Steele, I don’t have much else

radicalhw

Oh have mercy, I learned more about sex from Scruples than I did from my parents’ awkward talks, my equally ignorant friends, or health class.

Natasha B

Bahaha yes. Ever read the sequel?

ChelseaBFH

I never read Scruples (maybe I will look it up…), but I did devour them entire V.C. Andrews oeuvre.

Natasha B

Oh yes. All the Flowers books. Oi.

gothicgaelicgirl

raised in a book lover’s home!
I was given my first stephen king book aged ten!
My parents figured “if she’s above her level of reading, she may as well read books AT my level”. =P
(not boasting but I was VERY advanced reader as a kid. Steinbeck at 11, and Shakespeare was my firm favourite when I was 8)

Bethany Ramos

All I took away from this is that I still love Hansen and MmmBop so much! I even tried to go see them as adults at sea world a few years ago, but the tickets turned out to be ridiculously expensive.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

Seriously? Expensive?

Bethany Ramos

Like more than $60 per person because it was lumped into the ticket for the theme park! But all we wanted was pure, sweet Hanson… Maybe $20?

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

You could probably catch them at a Bar Mitzvah or something.

FormerlyKnownAsWendy

I dragged out all the books I loved as a kid and my daughter seems to read 1 or 2 of hers and then one of mine. She loved Little House on the Prairie and anything else with a little history or myth/magic. And THE GIVER!!!!!!

Tea

I started writing YA because Twilight and similar books irritated me so badly. Plus, I like writing teenagers that act like teenagers.

jerjonji is a YA author I’m really fond of, and a super nice lady (Full disclaimer, I draw her cover art, but it means I get to read everything before anyone). I also like Kenneth Opel, and the Discworld series. I liked Heinlein’s younger audience books, but I was a dork.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

REDWALL!!

momjones

Spent 32 years teaching Advanced Placement Literature and Composition. I let my three children read whatever they wanted. One of my daughters, (who I also taught – a story in itself!), an English major, still loves YA Literature. She will also quote Joseph Conrad when it relates to those same YA novels (“The horror!”) My philosophy: read everything and anything – that is the basis of solid critical thinking.

http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

Your daughter’s reaction to the unwanted kiss makes me think she’s already got her head on straight. Banning books doesn’t do much good – I think it’s good to talk about the problematic things in books like “Twilight” (although she already seems to have a good understanding going on) but putting things on the no-no shelf just makes them seem cooler. Sunlight is the best disinfectant, right?

Also, because I love talking about YA lit, I second the Terry Pratchett suggestions above and reiterate my Lloyd Alexander, and raise you a Tamora Pierce (earliest stuff is a bit rough though I’m still emotionally attached to the max, but the “Terrier” series is amazing), Avi, Lois Lowry, Marguerite Henry (PONIES!!!), Ursula Leguin’s “Earthsea” … yeah. Books, man.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

“Sunlight is the best disinfectant” Awesomesauce. Stealing.

http://mother--bored.tumblr.com/ Aimee Ogden

You definitely should, I stole it from Justice Louis Brandeis first!

noelle 02

I second Tamora Pierce and The Circle of Magic and Protector of the Small books were adored by my kids at 10 and 7.

pixie

I adore Tamora Pierce’s novels based in her Tortall universe. I still read them (and can’t wait for when the next one comes out)

val97

I think they make good discussion material. Don’t laugh. I think most of us adults can dissect why Bella makes a terrible role model. Maybe ask some questions that at least get your daughter to consider some of Bella’s choices?

bl

I agree. I’d actually encourage reading the phenomenon type books regardless of quality. They’re going to be everywhere, might as well read them along with a kid and make sure they can at least think critically about them. It’s also a great way to talk about a lot of the sex/dating/drugs issues that are sometimes hard to bring up out of the blue.

pixie

One of my friends wrote a paper on Twilight and how Bella is an awful role model and is in an abusive relationship for an English class in university. Needless to say my friend is a pretty big feminist (as am I) and did a really good job writing the paper.

chickadee

Here’s a voice from the other side–I went through the crap-reading stage with both of my bright, unusual, and weirdo daughters, and they are fine. They came out the other side with a clearer idea of what good books are. They read the crap books because their friends did, bit ultimately my influence and their own brains won out. So don’t worry.

Kay_Sue

My mom is an early childhood education specialist with her Master’s in early literacy.She’s guided my hand all the way through his early literacy stages. We read to my belly. We read to my sleeping newborn. We read to the infant trying his best to crawl away and the toddler that wanted to hear “How I Became a Pirate” 18 times in a row every night…we read the Hobbit at five. We’ve read the first two of the Chronicles of Narnia. He sees me read, he sees my husband read, he sees his grandmother and grandfather read. We take turns reading to him. If there is something you can POSSIBLY DO to encourage a voracious reader, we’ve done it and are doing it and really should probably do it less.

So imagine my consternation when, instead of what I’d consider classic or quality literature, he’s now drawn consistently to Star Wars easy readers and comic books. I called my mom in a tizzy. “Where did I go wrong?” I’m saying, and she’s going, “Hey, your mistake was giving birth to an autonomous human being with his own likes and dislikes.”

So we’ll be going through the entire Star Wars section of the library and we’re looking for suggestions for more kid-friendly comic books. I figure if he’s reading, I’m happy.

I hope that I can apply the same philosophy to music someday, because I know I had my days…my Backstreet Boys and Nsync and Britney Spears lovin’ days….but I don’t know how far my patience will go…….

I laughed and commiserated all the way through this piece. I’m going to have to print these and stick them somewhere for review when the kiddos get older too.

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

A friend of mine brought Doraemon back from Japan. It’s a reader manga for teaching kids English over there, and features a time travelling cat or something. Hooked.

Kay_Sue

I’m going to look it up. He adores my sister who is way into anything manga (although hers is…eh…more adult, you know) and I bet he’d get a kick out of it.

gothicgaelicgirl

LONG LIVE DORAEMON!

xvala

My 11th grade AP English teacher had a philosophy towards reading that I will always carry with me: It doesn’t matter what they are reading, so long as they are *reading* at all.

gothicgaelicgirl

I am a massive manga collector, I can recommend some good kids ones.
Yu-Gi-Oh, Pokemon of course, anything by Ghibli,

Shaman King (currently rewatching the series) is about a boy who can talk to ghosts and uses their powers in a tournament to become Shaman King. (definitely one I can recommend, I’m 23 and love it, my little one is 8 and she loves it)
Shinzo
Rave Master
Shin Chan (rude in a child’s sense, little boy who is basically a Japanese dennis the menace, does a butt dance, actually very funny)
Cardcaptors (sometimes called Cardcaptor Sakura)
Hamtaro
Chi’s Sweet Home

Not sure what age the laddie is but most of these are pretty safe.
Kingdom Hearts is great too cos it ties in with the games of the same name (combines Japanese game Final Fantasy with Disney characters!)

MANGAGET.COM is great for reading these for free online.
ANIMEGET.COM is good to watch the shows as a followup. =)

Kay_Sue

He’s 7. I did not even realize Pokemon did them, he’d love that. He started getting into them over the fall.

Thank you so much. You are awesome.

gothicgaelicgirl

Pokemon is HUGE!
Delighted I was able to help.
Shin Chan would be up his alley too, what 7 year doesn’t think farts are awesome?!

pixie

Ooh, new mangas/animes to add to my reading list! One I liked a while ago was Shugo Chara. It’s pretty cute and in the magic-girl genre (not sure how boys would like it, though). Fruits basket was pretty good too from what I remember. Though I’m sure you’ve probably heard of both.

I also recently bought up to volume 12 of the Sailor Moon manga. I’m the same age as you.

gothicgaelicgirl

I’m rereading Bleach.I introduced my girls to Dragonball Z anime a few months back.
The little one erupted into heartbreaking tears when Goku died.
Child was inconsolable.
Bad mommy that I am, I knew it was coming and took a picture just as her face collapses!

K.

I am a staunch believer in letting your kid read whatever they want to read. Comic books, bad romance series, instruction manuals, the back of cereal boxes. Reading should be fun.

As a child, I LOVED “Sweet Valley High” and “Goosebumps.” But I also loved Edgar Allen Poe and Louisa May Alcott and John Bellairs.

CMJ

Oh god, I used to sit at the table FOR HOURS reading the back of cereal boxes and making up commercials.

K.

That makes me smile

Julia Sonenshein

Your kid sounds awesome!

http://www.gamedevwidow.weebly.com/ Theresa Edwards

thanks! I’m quite partial to her.

Roberta

I remember in 5th grade that I started a long and intense Archie Comic Phase. My mom would go to my teacher and worry about how they can help bring me back to novels. My teacher replied “Well, she’s reading, isn’t she?” and told my mom that there are all kinds of literature out there, and not everything has to be novels.

He also introduced me to “The Hobbit”, so we got along just fine Books should be like food: find what tastes good, find variety, and don’t feel guilty about enjoying a bit of junk food.

Alicia Kiner

My son informed me last week that in his new room (when we get our house) he wants each wall to be a different (BRIGHT) color. My daughter has hot pink curtains. Her room with white walls and blue carpet now looks magenta during daylight hours. I’ve been trying to avoid pink since I found out I was having a girl. I took her last weekend to get her hair cut to make it more manageable for her to care for alone (because heaven forbid I help her with it). All of this to say, I wanted my kids to be comfortable being themselves, to love themselves for who they are, and to be proud of who they are. So far, I think I’m doing a good job. Unfortunately, I think I may be doing TOO good of a job. I wanted them to be independent, but I was hoping they’d be dependent on my opinion just a little longer

redzulu

I love some good brain trash. You definitely need it once in a while. Who can be serious all the time. Sounds like you are doing it right. Just the right amount of both. Love that she said you can’t kiss him. I hope I can recognize moments like that as parenting wins and still allow my kid to be a kid.

Diana

If you think about it even classics like Wuthering Heights and Frankenstien are teenage trash romance/melodrama/horror. They were even written by 17 year old kids. It just depends on your perspective.

Rollergirl09

Am I the only one who is going to point out that it is Stephenie Meyer, not Stephanie? Whenever one of my friends is super smug about how their kids will never like whatever is popular and how they’ll only read good literature I secretly hope their kid is a Bieber fan with a Bratz doll obsession and will only eat chicken nuggets.

pixie

Scott Westerfeld is good for YA (Uglies series, which is futuristic, and Leviathan trilogy, steampunk-esque WWI era) and features pretty strong female leads and the Uglies series has some pretty good societal commentary. Tamora Pierce is pretty fantastic. Harry Potter, obviously. Louise Rennison’s Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging series. Libba Bray’s Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants. I could go on. I adore YA fiction. I’m currently reading Cassandra Clare’s the Mortal Instruments series (City of Bones, etc…the book is way different from the movie and way better).

I’ll admit to reading (and watching) the Twilight series. I never really liked them (for the reasons you mentioned), but I got the first three books free and figured I might as well finish the series. I was reading at a high level from a young age and something about Stephenie Meyer’s writing bothered me (ok, most things about it), not to mention the overall creepiness and stalkerish tendencies of some of the characters and the fact that Bella has no spine what so ever. I’ll admit to liking the Host a lot better.

I’ve always known I was a lot less cool than I thought I was as a tween/teen, I still rocked it, though. And your kid deserves a high-five for that Winx Club critique.

Armchair Observer

Have you read any Amy Bartol? I am even more creeped out by the male lead in her Premonition series–something I wouldn’t have thought possible after reading the entire Twilight series.

***I promise I read grown-up books, too. I just love some good YA as a break from grad school data overload.***

pixie

I actually haven’t heard of her, but I’ll check it out to see how creepy it is.
Trust me, I know where you’re coming from with the grad school overload, I’m in my first year of my masters currently working on my thesis proposal, and I, too, read grown-up books but need a mind break every now and then

March

Oh come ON, there is nothing wrong with Piers Anthony!

angelina ♥

My dad threw out multiple copies of Interview With the Vampire was about 11+…I tend to re-read things and didn’t catch on until about the third time it went missing.

Momma425

I am disappointed in the whole Twilight thing now-a-days mostly because there are all these wonderful ones that are perfect for that age group that seem to have been forgotten about. Remember Ramona Quimby? Or the Agony of Alice series? Afternoon with the elves and Island of the Blue Dolphins are still some of my favorites.
I guess I did go through a TERRIBLE Babysitters club phase…but there was definitely some great stuff mixed in there too.
I guess as long as she is reading.

gothicgaelicgirl

o god, island of the blue dolphins!
I JUST gave that to the 10 year old to read before bed!
Harriet The Spy, Famous Five, Judy Blume, and my personal favourites, the Point Horror and Goosebumps. All BRILLIANT books

Armchair Observer

Cassandra Clare is more girl power friendly. Meg Cabot’s anything is as well. Tamora Pierce is really pro-girl power (and awesome–her books are just that darn good). The Divergent series is also strong girl who doesn’t just get led around by the male lead. All three are a bit more frank about sensual sides of teen relationships, though, when compared to Stephenie Meyer.

Ddaisy

When I was a kid, I tried to police myself that way. I refused to like any song or TV show unless I was 100% certain it was kid-appropriate, intellectual, presented a positive message. I was so neurotic, it was awful! Now, I proudly and unabashedly crank up the Ke$ha and One Direction. I delightedly watch Vampire Diaries and Pretty Little Liars and even sometimes the Bachelor, and I am so much happier and less stressed out!

How much something challenges your mind depends a lot more on the viewer than the viewing material. In high school, I wrote an incredibly detailed paper on themes and motifs in Pirates of the Caribbean (which is seriously the best movie of all time), and in university, I wrote an English paper examining Taylor Swift’s lyrics as poetry. (I earned an A for both of those.)

Don’t worry so much about WHAT your daughter watches/reads/listens to as HOW she does. And from how you described her in this article, it sounds to me like you’re doing an awesome job of that!