Author: Grumpy

Jay-B is the only member of the team who can spell “antidisestablishmentarianism” and that’s really the only reason he is on the team at all. Admittedly, it doesn't come up a lot, but when it does. . .

Jay-B is the only member of the team who can spell “antidisestablishmentarianism” and that’s really the only reason he is on the team at all. Admittedly, it doesn't come up a lot, but when it does. . .

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where the hookers are, and where to get drunk cheap, and who sells meth the cheapest, and what a bunch of disappointing jerks you all are, and all that Gunny Highway kind of crap. In the first place, […]

WASHINGTON — The Department of Veterans Affairs plans to tackle the problem of long call wait times by automatically disconnecting calls that keep a veteran on hold for 30 minutes, sources confirmed today. “For too long, we have kept our nation’s veterans in an unending limbo of hold music and meaningless reminders that ‘their call […]

ABDERDEEN PROVING GROUND, Md. — Public Affairs officials at 20th Chemical, Biological, Radiological, Nuclear, and Something That Begins With “E” Command are scrambling after a slew of IG complaints were made public yesterday accusing leadership of using fake names on Facebook to snoop around their subordinates’ accounts. Top officers at 20th CBRNE have apparently been using […]

WASHINGTON — The US Army’s ongoing efforts to be more open and accepting has expanded this week to include another historically marginalized group: Furries. According to sources close to acting Army Secretary John McHugh, the Army will soon announce a set of uniform accommodations for these soldiers, who fetishize animal costumes. “We are committed to […]

An Op-Ed By Staff Sgt. William Tecumseh Charmen, Blue Angel No. 4 Crew Chief SANTA CLARA, Calif. — America and football go together like burger and cheese, which is why I am pleased to spend my Super Bowl Sunday working on Blue Angel No. 4 instead of attending a Super Bowl party with my family, […]