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If you're...sad, depressed or just need a hug, you've come to the right subreddit. This is a place where you can share your own stories and help others with theirs. Feel free to also post anything and everything you find sad.

Just a few ground rules: Never EVER make fun of anyone's story. It takes a lot of bravery to post here. If you have just come here to laugh at other peoples' misfortune, please do so to yourself. Everyone is different and is saddened by different things, so please don't go freaking out on someone because something they found sad wasn't sad to you.

I don't usually talk about myself very much, but I've been pondering many things. People ask me why I'm sad sometimes, sometimes it's because I am fat and my friends have no trouble with being undesirable, they get guys all the time, and for me it's just like there are no options if I want a guy then I have to lose weight. And part of me wants to, but part of me just wants to stay the same so that I don't have to change to be loved and wanted. Part of me says I should be happy that people talk to me because they like me as a person, not because in their eyes I'm attractive. But part of me wants to be just like my friends who are always talking about how good the sex was last night or how excited they are that they're with a new guy... I'm so torn... And I guess I'm going to start losing weight but it makes me feel worthless that that is what I'm resorting to. It makes me feel like the only way to be a happy woman is to be beautiful in the eyes of men and other women. It makes me sad for what humans are I guess. It makes me sad that when I see a friend who is pretty I can't help but think people only like her at first because of her appearance, and that maybe someone is using her because he desires her sexually. I'm so conflicted about whether I should conform or whether I should stay above it all. But I know it feels good to have a man say you're pretty, possibly feels better than knowing that people talk to you because they like you as a person. So I'm debating which is more important. It seems like before I would have known the answer, but now I just don't know. If anyone reads this, thank you.

I think you should try and lose weight. But do not do it to be desired, do it for you. Do it to make you feel good. Try and stay possitive about it, don't listen to other people. Don't take any shit about how "good" it is for you and how "pretty" you will be. Do it only for your health. Don't do it to make life easier for you, do it to make it longer.

Do you want a man? To be in a relationship for the sake of it? Or do you want to take a peek at what it feels like?

When it comes to taking initiative, it is subjective to decide why you want to even bother. The fact that you feel conflicted about what you want to do implies that you might be hesitant in the first place. In this case, choosing your battles is a valuable skill.

When I was in middle school, I was the short, chubby, mexican kid who didn't make much of a presence in his classes or in general. This was my outwardly appearance however, and in reality, I was content and as a result, happy. I think to be happy, you have to be comfortable with your surroundings, and I was a very adaptive/malleable person when I was younger. However, this meant I was gullible. With this, I listened to what people were saying about me, my insignificance, my lack of presence, just that nice kid.

I was sad, then I was mad, then I was determined. I thought, if these fuckers don't like the way I look, I'll reflect my appearance with my personality and still be my comfortable self.

But first, I cut my hair. I had a potato/mushroom hairdo going on and I wanted to go back to my short cut look to show some face.

Immediate change. Overwhelming change. After this, I thought that I might try to get rid of this weight as well. I didn't hit the gym or change my diet (as to stay comfortable :) but I did exercises before I went to bed. I started out with what I was comfortable with, and then pushed myself using the thoughts and quotes from my peers as fuel.

I quote: stupid mexican jumping bean - chubby chancho - brown faggot - among others. These would run through my mind as I'm doing planks, push ups, sit ups, and it would drive me till I drop. I could analyze my progress by increasing the amount of exercises I could do, and it felt great for myself. Showing off my peers was just a bonus.

But, I miss how I used to be. Keeping to myself, not giving a fuck about how I looked, and taking things as they go. Being comfortable. However, I learned a lot by making these changes, I grew up.

This is when it comes to you, and very much like your quote, "in much wisdom is vexation," you need to be prepared if you want to make this transformation. Your presence will be observed, you'll be prone to judgement more, you'll have to be prepared.

I would like to ask you to think about where you stand. Are you going to be a bridge, somebody who helps others and as a result, stays purposeful and stable (I'd like to be this), or are you going to rise to the top through hard work and determination. I think you should find a balance, but it's up to you. PM me if you'd like to check in!