Named the "Best Blog" by Parent & Child Magazine, this popular mom blog chronicles the wonderful mundaneness of a Philadelphia stay-at-home mom's life with four small children including twins in episodic form. Recurrent topics include adoption, multiples, Fifth Disease, Crohn's Disease and pregnancy, and academia.

December 22, 2008

Cortlen's Horrible Life

Life can be so cruel.

Last week, my elderly friend gave each of my children two crisp one dollar bills for Christmas. The money started burning holes in the beneficiaries' pockets the minute that the envelopes were opened, so I decided to take the eager shoppers to the local Mennonite thrift store before anyone got hurt.

Before stepping foot on the hallowed ground, I tried to persuade the newly rich to put their bills into my purse for safekeeping. I didn't get any takers.

"Then at least put your money in your pockets," I suggested.

Two children dutifully shoved their bills into their pants. The child wearing a pink dress stuck out her tongue at me. A few minutes later, a loud wail reverberated from the toy aisle.

"I can't find my money!" cried a distraught customer.I shrugged my shoulders. "That's very sad," I said.The customer squinted her eyes and peered suspiciously at the other shoppers."I think that lady stole it," she said, pointing to a woman wearing a brown floor-length dress and apron.

Cortlen spent his two dollars on a treasure that you can't find anywhere else, except for the bottom of a Happy Meal bag.

My daughter would have went on and on about how her toy was SO much better until my son no longer wanted his and then craved her toy..and then traded. She's already mastered reverse psychology! I have to intervene a lot too.. she's so sneaky!

well i am new to your blog and last night is the first night i've read it and i haven't laughed so hard in a long time i also have 4 kids my girl who is 4 and then i have 3 boys who are 3,2, and 1 so as you can imagine a good laugh is very important so thank you so much!!!

I don't know how many times I tell my eldest to put his money, phone, camera and every other expensive item he has into his pockets and zip them up. I've lost count of the number of cell phones, wallets and money that have mysteriously disappeared over the past couple of years.