The Dyson DC78 Review – Sucking It Fancy

Let me tell ya something, things have really been coming up roses for the Burd lately. I don’t know what PR list I’ve gotten on but it’s the one where they say, “Would you like to try amazing shit?” and I say, “yes”.

This time it was Dyson.

Just to give you a little bit of background on this one … I own a Dyson upright. I saved and saved to buy it and it’s a running joke in my family that when I die I want to be cremated then vacuumed up and buried in my Dyson. I love that damn thing.

Then I receive this email asking me if I’d like to try their new DC78.

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I respond all cool and casual. “I suppose,” I say then run around the house screaming, “I’m getting a Dyson! A DYSON!!!!”

So the next step was finding out what Marisa thought of it. She is the angel that cleans my house and I wanted her opinion – after all, she knows cleaning. When she came in I explained that I have this new vacuum. She says, “Oh yes, I’m familiar with this” in her beautiful Portuguese accent. I then said, “ let me know which vacuum you like bett…” – “This one.” she interrupts. “It’s easier to get under everything, it’s lighter, and it cleans more.” she says. Oh, okay. Guess that was easy.

(Note: I should also point out that both Marisa and my original Dyson are huge extravagances for me. I love shopping thrift stores and garage sales just as often as the decadent stuff. For some reason I felt it was important to explain this because I was worried that I was sounding like Gwyneth Paltrow talking about the organic kale chips I paid $20 that were simply divine.)

Anyway, the vacuum rocks and is all the things you expect in a Dyson.

Stuff I loved:

It’s light and nimble so you don’t feel like you’re dragging a tree stump around your house.

It doesn’t need bags (obviously) but this one also doesn’t have a filter to rinse anymore.

It comes with all the gadgets including:

A tangle-free turbine so you can suck up hair without it getting wrapped around the beater bar

An articulating hard floor tool that gets every single speck of dust on hard floors,

A groom tool to use on tolerant pets (Commander Sally Pickles was not a fan), and

A stiff bristle brush to get the ground in stuff up and sucked away.

It even has a trigger to reduce the amount of suction so you don’t inhale your curtains or area rugs.

The container thing is easy to empty, although, it never ceases to thoroughly disgust me at how much dirt, hair and crud it picks up.

The power cord and hose seem longer than average – it covered more rooms than my other vacuum.

As with all Dysons, the suction is amazing and it doesn’t lose that suck as time goes by.

Things to consider:

I’m not going to pussy foot around this one – it’s expensive – like big car payment expensive. However, if I had to choose between this and a pair of Louboutin heels, or an iPhone, I’d still go this route simply because it will last me longer and I like shit clean.

So, if you’re as easily excited by cleaning equipment as I am, then I would highly recommend the DC78. The way I figure it is that I’ve had my original Dyson for over 6 years and it still sucks up dirt just as well as the same day I got it. Assuming this one will last just as long (if not longer), and factoring in a once a week vacuum, it works out to about $2.50 a use – and that’s only assuming it doesn’t last longer. A damn bargoon I say!

Anyway, I’m off to go suck up Cheerios off the kitchen floor with remarkable efficiency while humming John Lennon tunes to my beloved new vacuum; all the while marvelling at my luck lately.