“If your gonna send some one to save the world – make sure they like the way it is!”

A new breed of secret agent! xXx is presented as a James Bond movie for ‘Generation Next’ who are into Xtreme sports and loud punk music. But it is a great deal of fun. Sure, some of the special effects, particularly during the avalanche sequence are a bit lame. But thankfully most of the stunts appear to be done in front of the camera, rather than relying on technical wizardry.

The film opens in Prague, in the Czech Republic. A suave tuxedoed secret agent retrieves a microchip from an enemy operative. But within seconds, other enemy agents are upon him. To escape he darts into a nightclub. Inside the band Ramstein are performing. They play the kind of music I would call industrial-goth, but I suppose today’s youth would probably call it EMO. Amongst the black-clad gothic patrons, the agent stands out like a sore thumb. For his trouble, the agent is killed and his lifeless body is tossed about above the audience, like a crowd-surfer.

The death of this agent is symbolic. In his tux, he represented the James Bond’s of this world. He was the stiff, old-fashioned type of spy, who has hopped around the globe, staying in posh hotels and luxurious casinos. A spy whose methods were old fashioned, and were known by the enemy. He is a spy who has reached his ‘use-by’ date.

Meanwhile at the N.S.A headquarters in the United States, they are analyzing the small amount of information, that the nameless agent in Prague transmitted before he was killed. From the data they have identified a dangerous chemical weapon called ‘Silent Night’. And they have ascertained that the group behind the agent’s death and the custodians of this chemical weapon are a group called ‘Anarchy 99’.

Called in to oversee the continuation of this operation is Augustus Gibbons (Samuel L. Jackson). He believes the N.S.A should look outside the system for a new operative to continue this mission. He says, “Do we want to drop another mouse into the snake pit – or should we send our own snake!”

Next we cut to California. Senator Richard Hodgkins arrives at a fancy country club driving his sleek red Corvette convertible. Politically Hodgkins is outspoken about the youth of today. He has tried to ban ‘Rock’ music and video games. Unfortunately for Hodgkins, he hands his car keys over to Xander Cage (Vin Diesel) who is impersonating a car-parking attendant. In reality Xander is an extreme sports junkie who makes underground movies, videotaping his performance, whenever he performs a dangerous stunt. On this day his stunt involves stealing the Senator’s car and driving it off the edge of a bridge over a wide canyon. As the car plummets towards the valley floor below, Xander pulls a ripcord on a parachute and drifts down gently. The car, on the other hand, explodes in one of those giant orange fireballs that Hollywood do so well.

After the success of Xander’s cheeky stunt, he is hosting a party to celebrate. Only it is interrupted when the lights unexpectedly go out, and a SWAT team burst through the windows. Xander is shot with a tranquilizer dart and passes out.

When Xander awakes, he is in a diner. He immediately finds himself involved in a hold-up situation. Quickly taking stock of the events as they are unfolding, he quickly disarms the two perpetrators only to find out that the hold-up was not for real. It was a test arranged by Augustus Gibbons. He is looking for new recruits and Xander has just passed the first test in Gibbons recruitment drive.

There are more tests, but of course, Xander passes them too, using his extreme sports skills to get him out of tricky situations. The second half of the film concentrates on Xander’s mission which takes place in Prague.

Fleshing out the cast are Marton Csokas as Yorgi, the villainous head of Anarchy 99; Asia Argento as Yelena, Yorgi’s girlfriend; and Michael Roof as Agent Toby Lee Shavers, the gadget guy.

If you are going to enjoy this film, the first thing you have to get over is Vin Diesel as the hero. Diesel with his clean-shaven skull and lack of chin, would hardly pop into your mind as your classic, suave spy type. But that is the point, he is not your usual spy type. In fact the film-makers have, on the surface, tried to distance themselves as far from the usual Bondian spy film as possible. But this is all an act, and it is very cleverly done. The youth market may think that the film is ‘now’, but there are only a few short burst of rock music and even the stunts are the kind that you see is most big-budget spy extravaganzas. Most of the soundtrack by Randy Edelman is in the old school Bond tradition, and even though Xander never quite makes it to Vienna (is Prague close enough?), we are still treated to shots of cobble stone streets while the Harry Lime theme is played on a zither. It’s all a bit of an act. It pretends to be a new progressive spy film, but at the same time it is happy to revisit the past and play upon it’s spy film heritage.

One problem with making a film seem ‘now’, is that it has the potential to date very quickly. Although only five years old, xXx is already showing it’s age. Dialogue like “Word!” (yes, I agree with what you are saying) and “The cars are dope!” (The cars are very good) already sound dated.

The movie has a cheeky sort of charm. Ultimately it knows it is another Bond ripoff, but takes delight in pointing out how it is different. It’s difference is that it is youthful and hip and doesn’t really care about the ‘supposed’ finer things in life. But it is still a fairly effective addition to the genre. It wont be everyone’s cup of tea (or Cranberry Club Soda – I mean what kind of agent orders Cranberry Club Soda at a bar?), but it does provide big budget mayhem with plenty of explosions, chases, guns and girls. What more could you ask?

EXTENDED EDITION

When xXx 2: The Next Level was released at the cinemas, the producers took the opportunity to re-release xXx in an extended edition on DVD.

The added scenes do little to improve the film and in fact were on the original DVD as deleted scenes.

Also as an added bonus, they have included the short film, The Death of Xander Cage, which explains why Vin Diesel’s character didn’t return in the sequel.

The politest thing I can say is that this is a complete waste of time. It has no style whatsoever. It looks like a student movie, and the ending is terrible.

Adding insult to injury, it doesn’t fit in with the second xXx movie, which states at the beginning that Xander Cage died in Bora Bora.

The whole extended package was an insult to the fans of the movie, and hints at the direction the series was to head in the second movie.

Action: Pulse Pounding Tales – Vol 1. Think back to the days when heroes were heroes and the action was furious and full-blooded. Writing as James Hopwood, David contributed ‘Cutter’s Law’.

Crime Factory: LEE – Lee Marvin: one of the most coolly charismatic and extraordinary screen tough guys ever. Crime Factory celebrates Marvin’s life by making him the star of his own fictional adventures. As James Hopwood ‘1963: Trust’.

Crime Factory 11 (as James Hopwood ‘Hail, the Haymaker Kid’ – a look at the boxing pulps of the 40s and 50s)

Crime Factory 13 (as james Hopwood ‘As Long as the Paperwork’s Clean’ – an interview with Australian cinema icon, Roger Ward)

The LIBRIO Defection – Introducing Jarvis Love, in a white knuckle action adventure which harks back to the great spy novels of the ’60s and ’70s, but infused with the high-octane punch of a modern thriller.

Bushwhacked – A fight fiction short, set on the Central Victorian Goldfields.

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