Wacker faces Honor Council Charges for Lewd Surname

After working at PC for a few years, the Honor Council has finally decided to charge Dr. Wacker for having a ‘lewd’ surname. Honor Council members have stated, “We can’t stand for this anymore. His name is on the website and HP’s directory board.” As you know, these are places that people visit frequently.

The Honor Council just doesn’t want PC’s campus represented in this way. Wacker plans to defend his name to the end. He states, “I have planned a lawsuit against the Honor Council for name discrimination.” Wacker plans to make sure that his name stays on the website and the directory.

He wants to make this a precedent for fhis uture brethren with ‘lewd’ surnames. If the Honor Council makes a decision, Dr. Wacker will have to change his name or state a disclaimer when introducing himself. Stay up to date by checking Leni Patterson’s emails.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this article are meant in jest and should not be taken seriously. All quotes should be assumed falsified and should not be held agains the alleged speaker. This article is part of the BlueStocking’s April Fools Holiday prank and does not necessarily reflect the direct views of Presbyterian College or of the BlueStocking Newspaper. Thanks for caring enough to read the disclaimer. Merry belated April Fools to you, kind sir!