Hey dere peoplez, it's almost 2am but I felt that I should make a recount of what happened in my life~ Mmm it gave me these feelings that's really hard to describe... This is a not so succint but also not so detailed story about me and my gay crush, T.

First I'll introudce the people in my little "story-telling"~ There's J, who is one of my best friends. She goes to a different school but we meet up regularly and do things togetha. Then there's T. T goes to the same school as J, and T is queer. Shortly after I started coming out generally, I met T (or more precisely, we became good friends.. since we used to go to the same Primary years back but just didn't know each other too well), who on my coming out to J, also came out to J. I came out to T, while T came out to me. But just before my coming out to T, another guy called V came out to T. I had feelings for T, and I can feel T had them for me too. But I didn't tell anyone about these feelings. A few days later V asked T out, T said yes and T became more distant to me.

Okay another of my friend just came out bi... wow omg... my life is getting gayer by the second...

That makes 3 of my very good friends I've known for quite a while GLBT... (plus 2 more that I recently met, bout 2-3 months ago), I mean.. I always thot I'd be the only one! Kinda scary how I assumed their sexuality to be straight... and when I came out omg people started popping up all gay around me lol. Mmm it must be some kinda of karma drawing our gayness together... Mmm

My friend was ranting on about how he got rejected by a girl who already has a bf and he was going thru his options wit me... and for his last option I jokingly recommended that he could "turn GAY". Then he was lyk "Yeah I would if I fucking could, I have no idea what's going on in a girl's head". There, a straight guy hoping he was gay xD.

Rofl omg I found this tape that me and my brother made like 5 years ago. We used to record random tape stuff which I pretend to act like a host for a radio station and we play like music, read stories or immitate advertisements. Omg I'm like listening to it now it's so awesome! I can't believe I said those things I said in the tape though o_o.. I'm like so hyped up, random, retardedly acting and carefree in it~ And my voice hasn't broken yet it's so hilarious >_< it doesn't even sound like my voice...

Hmm.. I think in a way I'm a perfectionist... and it's reli getting to me coz I just can't let things go. I want everything to be at its best.. to be perfect.. argh, it's so annoying!

And argh, I think I'm too sensitive... I care too much about what others MIGHT think (although I've gotten a lot better to deal with this) and I feel bad and guilty and blame myself for things that might not even be my responsibility. Even though I know I do it, I reli can't help it. That's #2.

Okay um this is gona be a bit of a rant... i reli have no idea where to start.. but it's just this shit holiday i've been having in taiwan. I've got absolute nothing to do here, I'm missing so much time I could spend with my friends in NZ. It's also so damn hot here.. its over 30 degrees celsius. And I'm just pissed off with everyone in my family.

First of all it's my sister, she didn't come back to Taiwan and instead went to a South America trip so she gave me this huge list of stuff I have to buy for her... but then she didn't even explain everything properly. She told me to get her a ball dress, and she doesn't even describe what she wants it to be like. She told me that she told mum what she 'wants', but she only told mum she wants it red. Now it makes it so hard to choose one for her and it seems like I have to bear that responsibility if I choose something she doesn't like. Besides that, she asked me to get contact lenses for her as well... she said dad will know the shop which has the 'data' for her eyes so I don't need to worry. So dad said few days ago that we were going to check out the contacts... but today when I'm at my mum's place and she called dad to remind him about getting my eyes checked and getting my sis's contacts.. my dad somehow was all angry and now he decided not to get my sister's contacts (the reason partly because he thinks my sister need to be here to get a contact lense that matches her eye). And now I have to be the person to send an email to my sister on the other side of the world somewhere in South America to explain about something I don't even know much to her. It's going to piss her off and when I go back to NZ I'm going to be the one she gets pissed off with. Omg.

Grr... I have this reali bad flu and it's really getting to me now. It wasn't as bad yesterday but today I'm coughing like *insert appropriate comparison*. I'm also having these really bad headaches... grr tomorrow's my last day of school this term. What a great way to start the holidae...