Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Top 5 Situations When It Might Make Sense to Spend $128 on This Ripped T-Shirt

1. You are president of your local chapter of the Moth Damage Fan Club and need to make an authoritative fashion statement.

2. You are president of your local chapter of Spendthrifts Anonymous and need to make an authoritative fashion statement.

3. You are starring in a shockingly well-funded production of Les Misérables.

4. You thought the price was $1.28, so you were like, "Haha cool! A cozy, pre-ripped t-shirt for two bucks!" and you haven't seen your bank statement yet.

5. You stumble half naked into a Nevada airport (that's what you get for wakin' up in Vegas, am I right?), realize that you are half naked, and the kiosk next to your terminal is selling ripped t-shirts for $128.Shirt info here.

Why? Whyyyyyy?Distressed jeans aren't my thing, but they require time and effort to make, and maybe you'd rather buy them pre-bleached and ripped and pay extra for it. Okay fine. But this shirt? Takes maybe 5 minutes and a box cutter. And it makes you look homeless. I. Don't. Get. It.

When the zombie apocalypse occurs, & I am hiding out overnight in an abandoned home.. I hope this shirt is in the closet. (because the one I showed up in is probably soaked in various bodily fluids of non-survivors). It would go quite well with my distressed black denim skirt & my resilient Frye Veronica boots.

Actually.... the Les Mis guess isn't too far off. I have a friend who is a swing in the touring company of 'Phantom...Opera' & they giver her her own dress which she wears for all of five minutes, that is worth about $2,000.

But of course, hers is well made & doesn't have any holes in it, so...