Megan Fox Joined Twitter, Okay? Are You F-cking Happy Now?

Megan Fox launched her Twitter account last night, and naturally she did it in the bitchiest way possible via a Facebook post where she makes it abundantly clear she’s above all this shit but, GAWD, if she has to…

Against my better judgment, I have finally joined Twitter. Every possible version of my name is already in use so for now my Twitter handle is https://twitter.com/MeganFox516
See you there.

Even better is her bio which really makes you wonder why more people aren’t casting her in movies. She seems so down-to-earth:

Megan FoxLover. Healer. Mother

Just to put things in perspective, Charlie Sheen has done enough blow to literally believe he’s a military aircraft and even he looked at this and went, “Jesus Christ, lady,” before trying to figure out how much it would cost to have sex with her. “Only a billion? Wow, you’re making this easy on me. Check the couch cushion then meet me back in the bedroom. Bring coke.”