Russ Maschmeyer and Jessica Hische: 'YouTube's commenters were mostly idiots, while Gawker's were people who wanted to think of themselves as smart.' Photograph: John Lee for the Guardian John Lee/Guardian

Jess: We were so pumped about the project and we had so many awesome friends involved that we were like: "People will love this!" I pretty much subsist on the delight of others – it empowers me. And Russ said: "OK fine." Russ is an introvert.

Russ:I think Jess is really good at finding out what people are going to respond to.

J:I'm not a person who has bizarre tastes and flavours. I feel like I'm a normal person who's delighted by normal things. When we announced we were engaged, people said: "Oh my God, you're going to have the best wedding invitation ever!" I thought if we made the process more collaborative, the pressure wouldn't be so much on me, as on everybody.

R:The artworks by our friends on the invitation were wedding presents, actually. The only cost was hosting. So when there was a comment on Gawker – "I can't believe these people paid $100,000 to have a website for their wedding" – I was like: "I could make $100,000 from designing a website?"

Why did we put all this stuff about our relationship out there? It was just wanting to tell the story of our relationship to our friends who were coming to the wedding.

J:Right. It definitely started as a private thing. But as we worked on it, it became something else. I have so many friends who are strangers on the internet. To me, Twitter is just like a chatroom. And I thought: "My Twitters will love this." That made me want to work harder on it.

R:Jess has no qualms about sharing all her life.

J:Russ has forgiven me for a lot of personal disclosures over the years. I think our story isn't: "Oh, and then we were on a yacht." We have pretty fun lives, I love our lives, but we're not disconnected from reality. We had what was to us a pretty outstanding courtship, but not: "And then he surprised me with a trip to Zimbabwe…"

Then the story got picked up by media sites, and people who didn't know us would comment and say things like: "Well, usually, the more elaborate an engagement is the more likely a marriage is to fail." We were getting comments like: "These guys are narcissistic idiots." All of our friends and family were super-supportive.

So first of all we had a love fest, and the people involved were so happy with the way we'd used their artwork. And then the trolling began.

R: It was like watching a car wreck, because you couldn't look away.

J: There was some super-mean stuff and personal attacks. And there would be a difference in the commenters. YouTube's commenters were mostly idiots, while Gawker's were people who wanted to think of themselves as smart: they would say the sorts of things you would only say in your head.

R: I actually liked and still love that line on Gawker that our wedding invitation was "like two Wes Anderson movies fucking each other". I thought that was brilliant.

J: It was good. And actually, what they didn't know at the time is that I'd worked for Anderson. I did the title sequence for Moonrise Kingdom. So when that happened, many of our friends and fans came to our defence.

Plus, I'd hired my mother to be my digital secretary because she got laid off a couple of years ago, so she's getting all these emails and she would read the comments and leave her own comments. That was cool.

R: I think the trolling took an immediate, visceral toll on Jess, and on me a little bit – but lasting effects? None. It was like, that was unpleasant to watch – but a day later it was like, whatever.

J: Gawker asked me to comment. I didn't want to. You have to be an adult and not jump online and go: "You're a dick. You're a dick. You're a dick." Even though you really want to.

I'm still happy how it turned out. The only thing is that when someone reads that post on Gawker now, our site gets blasted. Once we had $1,000 in excess charges to the site. To be billed $1,000 for people to attack us. And Russ said: "You should send the trolls an invoice!" I said: "That's the opposite of what we should do."

Brody Ryan: 'I don’t tend to regret things but I do sometimes think: Dammit, I should have thought that through more.' Photograph: John Lee for the Guardian John Lee/Guardian

Famous for: a 16-second video clip viewed more than 1 million times on YouTube (see below). He became known by the hashtag #StarbucksDrakeHandsGuy after sending the clip to 20-year-old model Piper Kennedy. There were ruthless parodies, and Ryan responded with a track called 15 Seconds of Fame.

Everybody thinks we met in Starbucks and then I sent the video. The truth is, we've never really met. What happened is I came across her on Tinder. We exchanged information for a little while and then decided to take it to the next step. So I sent her my number and said: "If you'd like to get off the app then feel free." She hooked me up the next day, and I was, like: "Yes!" And we continued the conversation, sending each other innocent photos. She sent me photos of her on a hike, photos of her pets and whatnot.

And then I didn't hear from her for two weeks. I left her voicemails and she didn't respond. So I made a flirtatious video.

What was I thinking? I let myself be vulnerable so that she would feel more light-hearted about it. I don't tend to regret things but I do sometimes think: "Dammit, I should have thought that through more." She sent the video to a friend named DJ Brock in New York. He posted it on Instagram and then it was suddenly everywhere. Everybody had an opinion.

The experience was wild, man. I was being very spiritual over the two weeks prior to this, asking for some opportunity to arise. The day this all happened I slept in till 4pm and it was like life saying: "Get your rest because I'm going to take you on a journey." I got a coffee and a powdered doughnut, like a regular day, and that's when I discovered it all on the front porch, as it were.

And then the parodies started taking fire. I actually found them humorous. They were laughing with me. And when you saw the celebrities doing parodies people were sidetracked from the cheesiness of the situation.

The other funny thing is I had people taking it so seriously. They would send me their videos and ask: "Did I do it right?" I mean, there's no training class on Drake Hands dancing. Maybe I should write a book.

Then Piper went on the talkshow Inside Edition, and I just didn't recognise her description of what happened.

I went on Inside Edition the next day and gave my side of the story. I'd told her agent I'd prefer not to go on the same show as her. I got a text from him saying: "You're an idiot. Just by flirting with my client, you can make her a household name." The show's presenter called me an opportunistic, talentless loser and those are hard words for such an innocent video.

After that, it seemed like everybody wanted a piece of me. The exposure has been a positive, though I was a little annoyed that a lot of the parodies were sent to DJ Brock's Instagram account, so he gained 7,000 fans and I got 2,000.

I got a lot of haters, but I also got a lot of people saying forget them, and that has sustained me. With my management team, I'm trying to steer all this so I'm not a gimmick for the rest of my life. What did I learn? I guess I learned that you really never know about people. I'd say I'd be cautious in future, for sure. I'm still not getting the following I should have, though.

Maria Kang, 33, mother, businesswoman and fitness blogger

Maria Kang, with her sons: 'It's weird to have millions of people hating you. But it was great when millions more posted on my side.' Photograph: John Lee for the Guardian John Lee/Guardian

Famous for: posting a picture of herself wearing workout bra and shorts, with her three children, with the headline: What's your excuse?

I've had a Facebook page dedicated to fitness for a long time, and I wanted to inspire my followers. Why does that matter to me? Because my mother had diabetes, a stroke and a heart attack before she was 50. She always had time to watch her favourite soap opera.

For a while I was overweight and I struggled with bulimia. I've personally battled against that by working out and making better choices about what I'm eating. I've learned that it takes discipline, consistency and hard work, and I took that message to my Facebook page.

I got a picture taken of me with my three sons – they were eight, three and eight months old at the time. I take my kids everywhere so they can see that I work out and the choices I make. In the picture, I'm wearing micro shorts and a sports bra and you can see my midriff.

I knew the image was going to have an impact, but I guess the picture wouldn't have gone viral had I not put that headline on it. You see that catchphrase everywhere, so I didn't think it was a big deal. But it got something like 16 million views and 183,000 likes, probably more now.

When all the negative stuff started appearing, it made me mad. They said I was "obnoxious" and a "fat-shaming bully". It's weird to have millions of people hating you. But it was just great when millions more started posting on my side. Someone said: "No need to apologise to the fat slobs out there who don't know how to put down their forks or spoons and get some exercise."

I'm not a mean person. So I posted a reply to the haters, saying you have to take responsibility for your body – maybe what I said pushed a few buttons for you. I wanted to tough it out rather than roll over, and also to explain myself. I saw one comment that said: "People like you who post pictures like this make me cry because without surgery I will never look like you." I don't know that person, but there's a lot of entitlement out there, and some people are saying that you don't have to work to achieve. I'm saying you do.

I've been doing a lot of interviews since then. I went on the Today programme in America, which is a big deal. Do I have any regrets? Not at all. I learned that passion can take you a long way. The picture is still there on my Facebook page, but maybe I'll be more careful about what I post in future.

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