Categories

The Terror Twins really have their HEADS IN THE CLOUDS this week! Start stretching, get into the kitchen, make sure that dog DON'T EAT OUTTA THE BOWL, and get ready to FLY over MALIBU. This book ranked HIGH on Matthew's not-excited-to-REREAD list but, boy, was his ass WRONG. Listen and find out why it SOARED to the tippity-top of his MILE HIGH BOOK CLUB terror tomes! Featuring exclusive performances by legendary iconoclast Hilary Duff and pissing singer R. Kelly!

Jack Frost? JACK NASTY! Get ready for one of the weirder, wilder, COLDER entries in the Goosebumps canon in a remote Arctic village where there's a terrifying, confusing, contradictory local legend that'll send shivers up and down your spine! Allison Janney is a SEVEN-time Emmy-winning, Tony-nominated, GOLDEN GLOBE-winning actress, soon-to-be Academy Award WINNER. Hailee Steinfeld is a platinum-selling recording artist AND an Academy Award and Golden Globe nominated actress.

HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE! HUMANS ARE THE PAST! CREEPS ARE THE FUTURE!

FINALLY! A VAMPYR BOOK! Things REALLY go from BAT to worse for Freddy and Cara in this story - too bad it totally SUCKS! Honestly, it makes me so sick - I can't stop COFFIN! The Terror Twins are totally DRAINED after reviewing it, so FANGS for listening!

HAPPY HALLOW'S WEEN! MADtthew Scortch and DAMNiel MontGLOOMery are PUMPed about this trick-or-treat HalloWEENER-packed candy-coated ultimate JACK-O-CRACKO CLASSIC! Dump out your SACKS, shove candy in your SCREAMHOLES, ring those BELLS, and be a ding-dong-DITCH WITCH on this HalloWEEN'S NIGHT's GIFT. The TV episode? MASTERSHRIEK THEATRE! The book?! A TOME we'll take to our TOMBS! Did we mention this book also features TWINS?!? GET. NASTY. HAPPY ALL HALLOW'S WEAVE.

Get lost in the fictional European woods with us, little Matthew Scott and sweet Daniel! Check out this KOOKY CLASSIC (or IS IT?) and the no TV episode! All kinds of falling on hands and knees in this one, not to mention a pit with no BOTTOM. Did you hear that!? I repeat, NO BOTTOMS! Can Justin and Marissa find the legend of the legend of the lost legend?! Legendary? MORE LIKE LEG AND DAIRY!

Y'all chickens hungry for Grandma Rose's BLUEBERRY PANCAKES? Or how about some of her sweet-as-sin RHUBARB PIE? That's great! But whatever you do, don't go into the supply closet at the end of the hall on the third floor!! And stay out of the SWAMP. And never EVER let your parents go to Atlanta! Danny Mack and I Robot You Jane don't heed ANY of these simple warnings as they dive deep into the boggy foggy knee-filled mists of this stupid fun BOOK and swamp-trash TV EPISODE.

It's SUMRATIMES! and that means CAMP CAMP CAMP! Canoes canoes canoes! Daniel and Matthew pack their bags, hop on the BUS, and sing at the TIPPY TOP OF THEIR LUNGS "Yohhhh, Spirits!" They can't wait to spend their afterlives at CAMP SPIRIT MOON. Watch our for that NASTY fog and those ICY CANDY STICKY BLUE PUDDLES! Love you guys! You're standing on our hearts!

PICTURE PARFECT! Danny and Matt S. Montgoms love having their photo taken... TO THEIR GRAVES!! The Terror Twinz expose the Robert Lawrence book and TV episode - and FLASH! SNAP! You'll be gagged at what DEVELOPS! If Daddy wants to please me, he's only got to CHEESE ME! AGAIN.