My life with the triple negative type – A Winning Battle (and Search for Ways to Cope With Darn Chemo Brain)

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The Memories of Going to the Clinic

Going to the clinic brings me memories just five months ago and back–my multiple visits for shots post chemo, my sick visits due to low resistance to infections, and lab work. Each visit, I felt weak and unconditioned. I did not want to be here.

I still don’t want to be here. Today, my son woke up with swollen left eye and cold symptoms–sore throat, runny nose, and general malaise. All that and he still wanted to work.

“It’s Saturday, mom. Saturdays are required.” He shows me a text from his boss, the driver who takes them to the neighborhood to do his route selling cookies. Boss says he has to work or else…

I still did not let him and called in sick for him. Because I called and said that he is sick, he is excused and he is not losing his little job, my thirteen-year-old.

But still, I am the “bad mom.” “You want to work? Here’s work.” I handed him the basket full of clean laundry. Why, suddenly, his body aches became unbearable. *sigh*

Maybe, he needs to be seen by the doctor. So here we are, on a Saturday-bigger-copay-day, we sit in the clinic waiting for him to be seen. 😦

Saint Peregrine Prayer for people with cancer

O great St. Peregrine, you have been called "The Mighty," "The Wonder-Worker," because of the numerous miracles which you have obtained from God for those who have had recourse to you.

For so many years you bore in your own flesh this cancerous disease that destroys the very fibre of our being, and who had recourse to the source of all grace when the power of man could do no more. You were favoured with the vision of Jesus coming down from His Cross to heal your affliction. Ask of God and Our Lady, the cure of the sick whom we entrust to you.

(Pause here and silently recall the names of the sick for whom you are praying)

Aided in this way by your powerful intercession, we shall sing to God, now and for all eternity, a song of gratitude for His great goodness and mercy.
Amen.

Cancer Of The Breast…

(a borrowed poem)
[...] Cancer of the breast
from east and west;
it seems Pandora's box is
making a big mess.

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A Prayer When In Pain

I am bowed down and brought very low;
all day long I go about mourning.
My back is filled with searing pain;
there is no health in my body.
I am feeble and utterly crushed;
I groan in anguish of heart.

All my longings lie open before you, Lord;
my sighing is not hidden from you.
---------Psalm 38:6-9 (TNIV)