I am sorry to write to you again. I am just trying to deal with my HIV worries and eradicating each one of them. I cant think of anymore and hope there are no more and hope that whenever these events if they happen again I can just reflect back on advice you have given me i.e. your non existents to my previous worries in my battle against OCD. My therapy has now run out but I am putting back in for some more.

I have since been able to eat out again and also shake hands again thanks to you.

Again, something like a

1) Non existent
2) Non existent
3) Non existent

Would enable me to move on from all of these incidents below.

1) I woke up one morning and noticed that I forgot to lock my front door. I was worried someone may have come into my house and stuck me with an HIV needle. I checked my body all over and could see no blood stains other than about 4 Petechiae spots which is what I think they are anyhow, but I have had those for a few years here and there.

2) I fell over outside of the front of a business in a business park into a few small bushes, soil, stones and gravel. I cut my hands and got some small and slighter bigger cuts when I fell. I got worried there might have been a needle that caused one of the small cuts. So I went back at night and spent about 30 minutes searching where I think I fell with a flash light looking for a possible needle. I couldnt see one but then again I am not totally sure it was where I fell and it was dark even though I had a flash light. This not really the sort of place you get drug users though as its a bank business branch in a business park and it was quite near to the front entrance.

3) I normally wear shoes with very little soles and no heels and very thin protection around the sides just like a very thin material, kinnda like plimsolls. These shoes have very little sole, like the soles are like 3mm thick. So between my feet and the ground there is only like 3mm including the inside sole too. I have been looking at all my shoes and on the bottoms of them and on the sides of the shoes i.e the plastic parts and the leather parts and I have found cuts into them from things I have walked on or from unknown things?. In a couple of my shoes I have found very small pieces of glass even wedged into the soles. I checked the inside to see if the glass came through but I cant really tell for sure.
I am worried that since my last negative HIV test over a year and a half ago I might have stepped on a needle that had HIV in it or a piece of glass that might have had HIV on it and it may have gone though my shoe soles or maybe through the side parts of the shoes where there is only plastic or leather which I noticed also have small holes, cuts and cracks. I can't recall any bleeding or stepping on anything that caused pain but I may have forgotten as its been like a year and a half?
I have now bought all new shoes with thicker soles and better side protection on the sides as every time I was out walking somewhere I would check the ground if I heard myself walk on something to see if it was glass or a needle.

I would be so grateful again Dr Bob if you could take the time to answer this. This is truly a living nightmare but there have been improvements thanks to you.

Matt

Response from Dr. Frascino

Hello Matt,

1. Irrational fear; nonexistent risk

2. Irrational fear; nonexistent risk

3. Irrational fear; nonexistent risk

Matt, you need to get back into therapy. Your OCD remains OOC (out of control).

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