Wanted you to know that I saw both your posts and was thinking about them.

Memories have a way of flooding us with a kind of intensity. Sometimes I feel like I'm holding my whole body against a door behind which they lie. It can be exhausting, but in the long run perhaps necessary.

Please continue to pace yourself and seek whatever you need to stay strong. Eventually it is possible to gather enough resources and find ways to recover.

It's terrible that any kid has to go through that and has to deal with the fall out now as an adult. Just wanted to say that you aren't alone, there are lots of guys on here who can relate to what happened and to the confusion of dealing abuse like that now as an adult. I know I can relate. Anyways, just wanted to say that I hear you. It isn't easy.Ben

Hi Greg. I don't know what to say other than I hope you can find some peace with all of this eventually. You are not a sick freak, and no one here would ever see you as such because of what happened. It was not your fault, and couldn't have been. Keep sharing man. We are here for you. Take care. Peace,

I know I've said this to you before in other threads where you were worried about "coming across as a freak", but I can't say it enough. You DO NOT come across as a freak, you come across as a survivor. Peace,

I agree with Ken. You are not a freak. I mean, if you asked for a show of hands of who feels shame about the abuse, who struggles with remembering details, who was abused by their mothers, who initiated sexual contact with their abusers, whatever else you struggle with or worry about - you would see a sea of hands here. Someone relates. It is sad sometimes, but sometimes comforting. You are not alone in your pain or in your struggle. Not here.ShalomBen

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