Wednesday, 13 May 2009

Being thrown in at the deep end just so someone can watch you drown is no fun.

I feel like crying.

I have also developed sciatica in my right leg. It hurts like it did when I found out about Jordan and Peter.

I am falling apart now that I'm 26. Sciatica, ovaries - what next?!

8 weeks to wait to get physiotherapy. I may attempt a DIY amputation before then.

The ad with the limping donkey has just come on TV. I am definitely going to cry now.

Fuck you, donkey. Every fucking time.

And I don't even have a heart. It is ridiculous.

It's like in a sci fi film where a robot starts feeling human emotion. It does not compute.

I have made cake though. Delicious white chocolate, walnut and banana-y cake.

I am clutching at straws, trying to make the day seem less spectacularly put-Radiohead-on-light-a-candle-and-abandon-all-hope awful.

I really want to write a huge rant naming names and saying exactly what I think of some people and certain situations. But I shall refrain because I am a coward. And it would make me look pathological.

I am going to have to break out the big guns.

Whenever Chan is upset or anxious, I always tell her to think of otters holding hands.

So I'm taking my own advice.

I feel a bit better for seeing their furry little faces. I just have to forget about the fact that one of them is actually dead.