I should feel more (or less)

Lying on the beach
Under the sun
Breathing
Feeling
Just letting its rays
Have their way with me
Maybe a gentle breeze
To keep me cool
While I’m being warmed on the inside
Nowhere to be
No one to answer to

Ahhhh…

A moment like this
Only happens in my mind
Because if I were actually lying there
I would be too hot
Or too cold
Sand would blow in my mouth
Or someone would be talking too loud
A little too close
About things I disagree with
Or feel are unimportant
Or my thinking machine
Would take over
Crashing the party
Telling me
“Stop.”
“Enjoy.”
“Now.”
“What’s the problem?”
“Why do I feel like this?”
“It’s so nice here.”
“I should feel better.”
“I should feel more.”
“I should feel less.”
I’d somehow focus
On the sideshow
And miss out
On the beauty
Of my perfect moment
Not to say it’s never happened

A real moment
Undisturbed by my
Inability to fully appreciate it

I know how it feels
I’ve been there
But I have to admit
It’s more rare than I’d like
Not to say it’s not worth trying