Remember episode three of True Detective, “The Locked Room,” and that strange argument that Marty had with Rust over Rust mowing his lawn? One of the curiosities about that scene was why Rust Cohle had borrowed Marty’s lawn mower in the first place. Rust lives in an apartment. Why would he have needed to borrow his lawn mower? UNLESS IT WAS TO MOW HIS VICTIMS TO DEATH?

Anyway, it was an odd way for the show to illustrate Marty’s jealousy over Rust talking to his wife, or was it? Many of the fine commenters here picked up the eerily similar connection between that lawn mower scene in True Detective and a Woody Harrelson scene with Roger Clemens from Kingpin. Slate was nice enough to edit down the relevant scene from Kingpin, so that we could add this post into the system for posterity and in recognition of Tubesteak and the rest of you pyschos who appropriately didn’t allow the allusion to slide. WHO YOU CALLIN’ A PSYCHO?

Turns out, Woody Harrelson just doesn’t like it when guys mow his lawn. Time really is a flat circle, y’all.

Coincidence or intentional reference? OR IS ROGER CLEMENS THE YELLOW KING?

It may or may not be coincidence, but the main thing we need to squash is that these are the only two times this phrase has been used. It’s extremely common, whether it’s meant as a specific “homage” or not.

There never was any. Unfortunately, a couple of writer’s for our fair site here somehow missed the subtle nuance of MOWING ANOTHER MAN’S LAWN!
/glances sideways at Dustin (it was Dustin, wasn’t it? I know he was taken to the woodshed pretty good that day, being the only person in America and all that missed the unspoken subtext to MOWING MARTY’S LAWN!)

It must be. I thought we were at the point of just joking about it as frequently as the articles allowed at this point because of how absurd it was. But this artcle makes me think some people legitimately still think he meant physically pusing a mower across the grass. So weird. Also, I’m browsing Home Depot’s website for pre-Spring sales on last season’s mower models RIGHT NAO!!1

@righteous axe Yes, I got censored for speaking truth to power…I mean being mean…I mean using language unbecoming of this comments section. I guess you are allowed one F or one S in a post here, but not both. NEVER BOTH.

You won’t ever figure out what’s coming next on True Detective, but there is one thing of which I am certain, there is a thread of repeated lawnmowing which runs through this tale, woe unto you who choose to ignore it. In this tight flat circle of time, someones mowing lawns and others are getting their lawns mowed. It is the way of things, and lawns, and mowers. Amen.

The only part of this lawnmowing topic that reminds me of the idea that time is a flat circle, is how we keep talking about it like it’s a mystery that needs to be unraveled. It just keeps repeating itself and repeating itself and repeating itse…

I swore when I read this article that the inevitable “BUT HE LIVES HOUSE DUSTIN IS DUMBASS BECAUSE IT HAS UPSTAIRS” comment would come in under 30 minutes. I was wrong, but thanks for making it happen eventually. Apartments can have an upstairs, dude, and the hyperbolic hate on every Rowles post is getting very old.

What in the actual [redacted expletive]. This isn’t an homage to [redacted euphemism for excrement]. “Mowing another man’s lawn” is a common phrase, much beyond the scope of the movie Kingpen, and the only two people who didn’t know that (or at least pick up on it via context clues) evidently write for [redacted].

Not only that, Rust lives in a house, not an apartment, so [redacted] can just go ahead and throw that whole first paragraph right out the window, too.

This sounded way more hostile than I intended it. Apologies for that. But, if [redacted] never has to edit any of his stuff, I don’t see why I should, either. POST COMMENT

(Sorry for language and hurting feelings earlier. Language edited to protect the innocent.)

I never actually saw your original post (because the censors apparantly work faster than the copy editors on Upprox – whoa hey hey, I’m getting banned now, arne’t I? Shit.) but I’m of the mind that swearing in the comments should not be something that is censored on this site. If a post is directed at someone along the lines of “I’LL FUCKING MURDER YOU!!11″ or some stupid shit like that then, sure, ban them. But if someone posts that the writer of an article is fucking retarded or whatever, and it can be demonstrated or proven that the writer did write something that was actually retarded, then what’s the big deal? I don’t see one. If people don’t want to be butt-hurt by feedback in the comments then they should do a better job of writing.

Also, just to clarify, I’m not suggesting that Dustin Rowles is a bad writer. I have stated in other comments on this site that I just keep poking fun at the absurd idea that Hart was taking about his actual lawn and not his wife’s vajayjay because it’s so absurd that it deserved to be made fun of relentlessly. Also, I think it was actually Cajun Boy who wrote the original article that suggest Hart just really really loved his front lawn. And then he was adamant about defending his goofy observation in the comments. Are Cajun Boy and Dustin Rowles the same person? If they are, I was not aware of that. But if they are…LOL.

I don’t think they are the same person. Over than this lawn mowing meme he inspired, I actually think Cajun Boy is great. And he has no problem getting into the comments section and mixing it up with hecklers, so that instantly earns him some street cred in my book. Rowles, on the other hand, isn’t a great writer. Of course, he isn’t as bad as we act like he is. Rowles-hate has kind of taken on a life of its own, like the old Frank Stallone joke on SNL’s Weekend Update back in the day. His main problem is inattention to detail and probably a lack of editorial oversight. I realize this isn’t a newspaper, and I have no clue how a site like this utilizes editors, but I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect better, or to make fun of people, since, ya know, that’s kind of the way of the internet. Specifically, the way of Uproxx. See WWTDD for Exhibit A-Q.

In the first episode when they get out of the car to inspect the crime scene Woody turns the car off with his right hand reaching over the steering wheel very awkwardly, exactly like at the beginning of Kingpin when he turns his shitbox off before trying to sell condoms to the Bowling alley. I am too lazy to collect screengrabs.