Dahlia Diaries

And I LOVED every morsel of it!Thanksgiving is centered on family and friends gathering on the specific holiday, laughing, cooking, and most importantly EATING. The day turns into night with long distant cousin catchup along with badgering questions from the elders pondering on your wedding date and when you’re starting a family. I don’t deal with that much as my Thanksgivings have been with my close family hopping form house to house tasting all of their special dishes.​My favorite holiday as it revolves around food was a bit different this year. Since I wasn’t able to get home to GA, I took a “me” day for the occasion. My plan was to cook m own style of Thanksgiving dinner along with enjoying good wine and relaxing. I did all three and then some.

The menu for the day was sweet, tasty, and simple. Cornish hens, free green beans, roasted red potatoes and spinach salad. Washing it all down with refreshing lemon water and Shiraz (my fav wine).

Wine time until the food is ready!

I woke up later than I had planned but luckily the grocery stores understand the importance of Thanksgiving procrastinators and the "forgetfuls". Obtaining my necessary ingredients, I hurried home to start on my meal.​It had been a while since I dabbled in Cornish hens however, when you’re good at something, it never goes away. Stuffing them with scallions, red, yellow, and green peppers. Topping it off with a variety of seasonings including garlic, Italian, seasoning salt and pepper. Rubbing the hens down with butter for that added flavor, and my babies were ready to bake! I love to mix red potatoes with onion seasoning wrapped with butter or oil. As far as the green beans, zesty seasonings, but not too much because I didn’t want to take away from that “freshness” taste.

As the gas stove prepared my meal, Golden Girl and Shiraz entertained me. I looked out of my window feeling grateful for how far I’ve come. Enjoying my New York apartment on a beautiful and blessed day!

After I was full of food, I retired with a hot shower, more episodes of Golden Girls and continuing the thoughts of thankfulness. Although I wasn’t able to see my family, I nice lengthy phone conversation eased my heart as they regaled in me actually cooking along with giving sass about me not preparing this meal for them. (I’m the baby of the family soooo, I wasn’t one to volunteer for the cooking duties.)

Food Check!

The Finished Product! :)

I had been looking forward to my solo Thanksgiving for a while and I’m very pleased with the result of the meal and the overall day.

Although the holiday for being thankful only comes once a year, we should put into practice of gratitude, peace, a good meal, and enjoying the blessings.

How did you spend your Thanksgiving? Share Below!

My night at an Inspirational Rock-Doc, Bohemian RhapsodyI have a thing for 70s and 80s rock stars. The whole idea of letting go and laying it out on the stage. Being free to just be… One band who is amazingly legendary is Queen. A British four piece band of misfits, responsible for the classics of “Bohemian Rhapsody”, “Killer Queen” (my personal fav), “The Show Must Go On", "Another One Bites the Dust", “We Are the Champions”, and so much more to name. Queen pushed the envelope in music, showing that you don’t have to be one thing to fit the formula of the music industry. The band’s front-man, Freddie Mercury, was one of a kind. The way he put on a show was like none other. His voice was impeccable and can’t be duplicated. One look at him and you know he was born to do it!

Finally Queen fans received another reminder of the band’s history and why they are legendary. The release of the movie Bohemian Rhapsody, a bio-pic of the band along with insight on how their music was created and the details of Freddie Mercury’s life. As soon as I saw the previews of this film I KNEW I had to go on opening weekend. This movie isn’t one of those “Oh I’ll just wait and see it later…” It’s an experience you have to see as soon as it is released.

Usually I’m not excited about movies because I have my Netflix and Hulu, but a movie about Queen. Oh I’m leaving the house for that one!

I planned a solo date to see the film because I needed this experience. Can’t wait on someone else’s schedule for this. For my own personal tribute to Mr. Mercury, I decided to create my own fashion rendition of the 1985 Live Aid Performancecostume. Simple and sweet yet displays an iconic performance that is still relevant today.

​The Movie.It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a film where I’m like OMG throughout the entire movie. No down times or boring moments. Everything about the film was amazing. The casting was so on point. I want to speak on a few cameos but I don’t want to give it away…Well, here’s one. Mike Myers. He plays a record executive for EMI in the film. Didn’t recognize him at first but after the credits rolled, “Oh wow that was HIM!?!?” Which is so epic because he revived the tune “Bohemian Rhapsody” for a newer generation in his movie Wayne’s World.

Kicking up my feet at the movies!

On to Freddie.You couldn’t tell me, Rami Malek, wasn’t Freddie Mercury. Hair and make-up did their part however, he brought it to life! You can tell thorough research was done and he was exceptional in re-creating Freddie’s life and performances. I hope he wins an Oscar for this one because this wasn’t some impression. Freddie was reincarnated right before our eyes!​We even got a glimpse into the genuine love story with him and Mary Austin. Although their engagement was broken off, they remained in each other’s lives and she was loyal to the end. He even left her a good portion of his estate to her after his death. (My exes only left me alone, but I wrote a book series about it so I’m good lol.)

The Inspiration.Throughout the movie, I was left with nuggets of inspiration. To live the life you want to live, break barriers, and DO what they say you can’t. That’s how you become legendary. Not by silly antics for attention. Bohemian Rhapsody inspires me to keep going and to be the person I was meant to be and for that, I’ll always be grateful to Mr. Mercury. Thank you for your gifts, your voice, and your live out loud performances that I can watch, share, and cherish. You can’t watch this movie and NOT be inspired. This is a movie you MUST see!

The month of June hit, the weather was heating up, which was a relief because of the never ending cold season. My crop tops were ready to come out and play. I spent the first sunset of summer chillin at Riverbank State Park as the beautiful colors of God’s creation painted the New York sky over the Hudson River. July came around and it started off good. Warm but not too hot. My box fan in the window, along with breezes climbing to my fifth floor, served me just fine.

Why did I have a fan and no central air nor an A/C? Welp in NYC some older building aren’t equipped with central heat and air and in order to cool your apartment down, you need a window unit. Didn’t buy one for my apartment because, as I said, the box fan served me just fine. Plus it’s New York, it’s mostly cold throughout the year. So I thought…

​As the temperatures rose, the fan worked overtime to blow out hot air. Since my skin is so sensitive at the wrong times of the year, I suffered from clammy skin and heat bumps. In addition, letting my windows up not only allowed for sporadic breezes to flow, insects felt it was an open invitation to come join my “hot” party. Seeking refuge in my apartment as well as seeing me as a snack. And not the “snack” that’s sweeping the social media comments and captions.

One day while standing in front of my open freezer, I couldn’t take it anymore. I humped it around the corner to a local outlet store and found a window unit A/C. I’ve seen these things get installed before, no big deal right? Well before then, I had to get it home and up my 5-floor walkup. Taking my strength to walk it across the street, I realized that carrying this heavy cooling system was a no-go. Uber to the rescue!

​Now it was time for me to get it up the stairs. Usually the walk-up doesn’t bother me but man I needed an elevator for a day like that. All in all, I took a deep breath and carried the A/C up the stairs, no breaks, no one randomly in the hallway asking if I need help. Just me. Reaching the door, I dragged that sucker in.

Installation time. My living room window was too big for the small unit. Didn’t realize that until I tried to screw in the final bolts. My bedroom window was the last resort. However, there was a road block. Bars screwed from the inside of the window, used as a guard for small children to prevent them from going out on the fire escape. Understandable but useless for me. I’m a grown up I don’t need it. After unscrewing the window guard I was ready to install the A/C. Late afternoon turned to evening as I adjusted, re-adjusted, and adjusted the A/C to make sure this thing wouldn’t fall out the window and break.

​The big relief came when I plugged it in and the cool air flowed. After all my struggles, the cruel summer inside of my apartment was at an end. Well almost…

Remember the bug party? Well New York seems to have a different breed of mosquitoes that are uncommon in GA. And uncommon to my sensitive skin. One or two bites turned into allergic reactions on my legs. GREAT! So now I sit here, doused in calamine lotion hoping for this irritation to clear up before a modeling gig. A modeling gig that consists of me wearing summer wear and a swim suit. Will the madness ever end?

Definitely looking forward to the Fall. I shall never complain about a long winter ever again. I LOVE summer don’t get me wrong, but it can turn cruel on you in a split-second. Just when you’re getting comfortable. Stay cool peeps!

What’s your “Cruel Summer” story? Please share!

​You're not his woman, nor does he have the desire for you to be. You're just filling space until the original owner comes back OR until he finds a better fit. You know, the one he’d be willing to put in the work for. Not you though. I call this position, the seat filler. There's nothing wrong with you, he just doesn’t see you as "the one".

Now think of the responsibilities of a REAL seat filler. They attend the award show, get called to a particular seat if they have a certain look or just next in line. They can’t get too comfortable no matter how good the show is. The star returns, and the seat filler is escorted back to the holding area. THAT’S what you are in his life.

If you are fully aware of when you’re in this position and decide to move forward anyway, understand that it’ll never be a win/win situation. You won’t get “camera time” (No social media sightings), no red carpet appearances (date nights), and you’ll never be welcomed to the stage during the highlights of his life. And at the end of the night, when your duties are complete, you’ll be sent to the back before the show is over.

Don’t invest too much in this position. It’s just temporary fun. And know that you do have the option to get up and sit in a section that is meant for you.

TRUTH MOMENT:I've often found myself in this position. So much to the point where I started recognizing that I was a seat filler and became "ok" with it. I understood that any day the phone calls and texts would stop, no more "quality time", no more intimate hugs in pubic. Whether I'd be warned beforehand or not, there would come a time when I would be forced to let go. Then I had the nerve to be shocked about it. But the ending would appear out of nowhere. When I wasn’t ready to let go. Like a roller coaster stopping the ride after the first big loop.

Oh that’s it?!

Over time I realized that, in a way, I inflicted this pain on myself. I knew the risks and I knew the results but I kept it going anyway.

On an episode of The Golden Girls I remember Blanche telling Rose: "Sometimes life doesn’t work out the way we want it to, so we have to grab our happiness however we can get it". I used to live by this. Telling myself that if I couldn’t have him the way I wanted, I'd settle for whatever I could get.

But when does a person come to the point where the constant disappointment and heart ache is enough? If I’m just going to end up alone, why not stay that way. Why was I giving so much to someone who gave so little? Was I not worth more? Did he not understand that I’m worth more?

Doesn’t matter. I wasn’t it for him. For whatever reason, I didn’t do it for him. My only job was to “fill the space”.

So tell me. What section are you sitting in?

Welcomethe ​HEARTBREAK!Tap into the heartbreak and engage in the conversations many are too afraid to start with lovers...Learn more about the Heartbreak Diaries Series!

Walking through Manhattan, busy streets, people moving quickly, buildings on top of buildings filled with art, business, beauty, fashion, and God only knows what else. Passing through places like Brooklyn and Queens admiring the murals, small businesses, and the various cultures who all had a hand in building these boroughs. Experiencing these wanders first-hand, how can you NOT get inspired to want something for yourself?

We all know that NYC is a hustle city.You must hustle to survive financially, spiritually, and even emotionally during the MTA mishaps, awkward encounters with people, and the weather that will leave you shell shocked if you come from the south.

The spirit of NYC ignites a fire within the dreamers who relocate here looking for more opportunities or to start over. I don’t see how anyone could move here just to be here. There’s always another door to knock on, and more pavement to pound. However, it doesn’t come easy. That’s where the hustle has to kick into over drive.

Staying the course.Now, it is easy to come here and get caught up in the nightlife, people, and events. If you’re not careful, you can lose focus. This is why it is imperative to always have a reminder of why you came here in the first place. Enjoy the town but understand that while you're sleeping, out partying, or just getting taken away from the views, there are thousands more who are moving past you to get things done.

Here’s a few tidbits I’ve picked up on how to stay focused within a city that has so much going on:

Each day, do at least three things towards your dreams. Of course, you can strive to do more but at least get in three tasks that doesn't involve working for someone else.

Find a side hustle to make more money to keep up with the cost of living and/or invest in your dreams. In addition, budget your funds for investing in your dreams. (Make sure your bills are paid though)

Celebrate the small wins. Those are motivation! Downplaying the moves and wins accomplished will only lead to a decline in your work ethic. This will result in you giving up. Don’t allow that to happen. Be proud of yourself for everything big and small each step counts!

You don't have to post about the moves being made. Yes, we live in a world where it's hard to not let people know what you're doing every day, but remember that it’s not a requirement. It’s not our jobs to convince others who are afraid to take risks that we are succeeding in our faith moves.

Do a self-assessment check. Figure out what you’re doing right and what you can change.

Veering of task (that’s normal)? Don’t dwell on that. We all fall off the wagon but it’s all about getting back in the game and keeping it moving.

Claim it! Get you some positive affirmations and stick with them daily.

Enjoy the spirit of the city. Walk around, look around, and be glad that you’re among the fold of dreamers and doers who are making things happen.