Woody Paige, Around The Horn's resident jester, likes to have a little fun on the show with his trusty chalkboard. Today's message: "Advertise Here: 1-800-555-HORN." What do you get when you call? A message from Paige? A phone-sex line? Could be anything.

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It's the phone-sex line. It seems that Woody thought that all phone numbers with "555" were fakes. Unfortunately, that doesn't extend to 800-numbers. But you do get a message:

Welcome to eight hundred, six, six, six, one, two, three, four.

Then there's this canned moaning, followed by:

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We are spread, wet and ready for you right now. Come on, baby, let's play.

Then a second voice comes on and says that if you're an experienced caller, you can enter your credit card number any time you like. Then there's something about the pound key where the "pound" is shamelessly emphasized.

Prediction: Tomorrow's episode will chalkboard-free; frivolous.

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