So I was shopping in T.J. Maxx earlier today, when I accidentally stumbled into the Stygian Nightmares section:

OH GOD HOW DID HE GET THAT.

Seriously, I really shouldn’t have touched that thing. My knowledge of Eastern European culture is rudimentary at best, but I’m pretty sure you contract Gypsy curses by handling that shit. Also, please note the name of the knife I gave him, I thought it highly appropriate: Simply CUT.