Tuesday, December 29, 2009

We are going to starve. Or live off mini M&M's.

The holidays were lovely- my Scroogey attitude was quickly reversed when I realized I'd be getting gifts.

eek. Gift highlights; A letter written to me from my very favorite blogger/author Stephanie Klein, petitioned by my super sweet man. A month of unlimited yoga, from my parents. The box set of The Tudors (I've been speaking "tudor" for 5 days straight now, "Come hither boy!" and "What say you?" my two favorite phrases.) and plenty of goodies that smell good and make my skin soft.

...now onto bigger issues.

The other night My Love and I got in a quarrel. Just a small one. But the weight of the issue, is grand. Issue: WHAT'S FOR DINNER.

Let's preface this argument with some history: growing up with a Mother who owned a dance studio, she worked from 3pm-10pm....dinner was Taco Bell at eleven o'clock at night, or rubbery chicken that my Dad baked. Or some odd assembly of food that came wrapped in plastic. It wasn't until much later in my adult life that my Mom changed her schedule and started using the cookbooks gathering dust in our junk drawer. I learned how to "fend for myself"....if you will.

My Love's upbringing was different; he came home from school, greeted by a snack. A pb&j, crusts cut off and large glass of milk (he still will not eat anything with an OUNCE of sugar, if it isn't accompanied by milk.) He ate dinner every night with the family at 5pm. In fact, meals were planned....a year in advance at times. Impressive and also never gonna happen in my house. Eggs were on the table every morning, there was always an abundance of Icecream in the freezer and "special" bread in the bread box. AND to wrap it all in a perfectly family bow, there were placemats, seasonal and handmade placemats.

How he's even attracted to me in the slightest is by some act of God. Or confusion and desperation. But, I'd like to think God has something to do with it.

The exchange that made me realize we're going to have to find a solution for this "What's for dinner" madness went like this:

Me, "Are you serious? You want me to eat rice, noodles AND soy sauce all together, in one meal? Do you want to have sex with a balloon later? I'd be able to float after that meal."

My Love proceeds to give me this dumbfounded look as if he's never heard of the affects of sodium on the human figure. Then the debate goes, well who's cooking this alleged stir fry? In all fairness, he HAS cooked more than I have in this home...but like I said, I'll just eat yogurt and call it a night. We bounce back and forth food options, his all involve some absurd caloric value, while mine carry some monetary value and a waiter.

In the most dramatic fashion, I end up crying with a spoonful of peanut butter in my mouth, as I question my ability to be a good housegirlfriend.

So what do you do about this? No one gives you a manual that says, "Here's how to live with your boyfriend: Chapter two- Change your eating habits and learn to cook, bitch."

When you're living with someone you have to find a compromise with everything; with things you didn't think twice about before. First it's peanut butter, then it's laundry detergent, then it's "I can't dry my clothes with a Downy Ball"....downy ball? Next thing you know you're at Target looking for a Downy Ball. Then there's; do we eat breakfast together every morning, do we decide dinner plans ahead of time?

The IDEA of being that woman who knows how to bake things according to altitude, and who makes a "signature" something that everyone asks for when you attend a party is all a nice IDEA. The idea of being perfect is always nice, it's just not real.

My solution is this; We cook together. TOGETHER. If we make mushy pasta, or overly salted sauce, we do it together. We chop and dice and smell and squeeze to check for ripeness, together. When we fend for ourselves, we decide together that it's a cereal night.

168 comments:

I'm not domestic either. Maybe in my older age, I'm becoming really culinary-esque because I'm such a foodie but rather prefer eating it than cooking it. Now though (my mother and Nunnie worry I won't be a good housewife) I started to cook, it's therapetuic.

Food bloggers helped me. Because I like bloggers and they have pretty pictures and easy to do recipes and then I felt so cool and happy that I produced something so delicious.

I also feel like to be a proper Italian, I need to master our family recipe of pasta sauce, pasta and salad. That's easy. I can wow people without doing much.

I love: http://userealbutter.com/http://www.purplefoodie.com/http://www.orangette.blogspot.com/http://www.seriouseats.com/

hahah this story is hilarious! im glad you are so honest :) i bet most couples are like this!! gah, when i get married i cant imagine what we are going to have to dinner..my boyfriend HATES everything i eat!

I really need to learn how to cook; it's my boyfriend's Christmas wish (not really, but probably). He ordinarily does all the cooking and he, quite understandably, would like me to pick up the slack. It's something I'm working on.

Cute post. I like pasta dishes myself. I can't cook a whole lot off the top of my head, but I can cook and I love to add veggies and things to whatever dish it is for flavor--y'know, within reason... Don't want to add veggies to a fruit salad. :P

This post speaks to me on so many levels, as I have only cooked two meals for my husband in our five years together and I HATE THE KITCHEN. I wish I could offer some great meals or advice, but sadly, I can't. I can tell you how to clean your apartment like no other, however! Good luck!

I love that you guys have the same funny conversations that all cohabitating couples have. Well, I know that Elliott and I used to have a really hard time with it. You see, I am the one that wants to have "meals" with substance while boyfriend will eat mac n cheese out of a box every night.

Here's our compromise:I plan dinners for 5 nights a week. I like to use healthy recipes from Self or Allrecipes.com or from The Trader Joe's cookbook. We BOTH do the shopping. I do most of the cooking, but he helps (especially with chopping onions and pouring the wine). If I do the majority of cooking, he cleans and vice versa. This has really cut down on the bickering, and I believe we do save money and calories!

Cooking I'm not so bad at, there is no crazy high altitude involved in most EXCEPT for rice. Rice sucks to cook here. Don't do it. It will ruin your cooking self esteem forever!

The trick for meat and an oven is a meat thermometer. I didn't want to believe it but finally gave in and it's a wonderful tool.

Baking: I suck balls at baking... especially HERE! What did I learn? Cut the baking soda and/or baking powder in HALF! If you don't, you have a flat pankcake disaster thing. Guess the rising stuff works too fast then quits in high altitude.

What else? Easiest/yummiest meal is just steaming/reheating King Crab legs. Mmmm! No talent needed and people think you are a God. They are almost ALWAYS on special at the Whole Foods on Colorado.

I am not domesticated in the slightest. It's pretty pathetic, really. I've been known to make scrambled eggs EVERY NIGHT. Sometimes I'd add in goat cheese since I'm addicted to the stuff but mostly, my cooking wasn't very broad.

As far as easy recipes though, I make a good lemon chicken recipe that i got from my mom and some veggie couscous that's also super easy. If you want the recipes I can email them to you!

I'm telling you right now: fish and veggies. Okay so it looks/tastes/sounds all gourmet and shit but it is SO EASY. Put two pieces of fish with a little bit of olive oil and possibly some cherrie tomatoes all together and put in the oven at 400 for maybe 15 minutes ....ish. Also, cut up a variety of veggies (seriously, anything. You could do sweet potatoes, any potatoes, brocolli, bell peppers, blah blah blah) and sprinkle them with salt and pepper, and put olive oil if you want. In my opinion, they're best by themselves. and bake those for 30 minutes.

The key to having your signature dish is practice. I made those dishes so many times and now I know how to make them easy breezy. Also, presentation is key. All it takes is taking the veggies off the pan and putting them on a nice dish and VIOLA you're a cook.

uhhh cookies is a meal, right? i'm convinced im a terribly cook so i avoid cooking most of the time... well i guess until the last 6 mo. i stopped eating cheese and crackers for dinner and started making LOTS of pasta... so let me try that again. my favorite meal to cook is ghetto mac n cheese. i like whole wheat pasta, but i hate cheese powder now. so i make my mac like normal. then i spoon in cheez whiz while it's hot. it's half healthy

I have been married for years and am only slightly ahead of you in the kitchen. I do try to get some easy to throw together things for events such as yours. In an emergency I throw fresh veggies and ground turkey on a store bought frozen pizza and it SEEMS as if I have done something. I need help too. Marie @ Lemondrop ViNtAge

I had this issue when I first moved in with my boyfriend, neither of us ever wanted to cook. Somehow we worked out some orderly system where the first person home cooks, or the person who does the grocery shopping doesnt have to cook. As you said its all about compromise!

My favorite thing to cook is chips and salsa. The cooking part involves putting the tortilla chips on a plate and heating them in the microwave for 20 seconds. I live with my parents and not a boyfriend for a reason

Man, I am NOT looking forward to living with my future boyfriend/husband! =)

I have a friend who lives with her boyfriend; she plans out their dinner meals for the week in advance and writes them out on the white board she keeps on the fridge. Talk about Little Miss Suzy Homemaker!

I think that the notion of deciding on what to eat together and cooking it together seems like a good idea. It makes you guys more of a team.

My favorite easy things to cook are grilled cheese sandwiches, chicken quesadillas, and spaghetti. SO EASY! I also like to make chicken fettucini with broccoli and bacon, which is also easy, but a little labor and time intensive.

Do you like Trader Joe's? They have a cookbook called "Cooking With All Things Trader Joe's." There are some really delish meals in there!

I quite luckily like to cook, though I quite unluckily have no boyfriend to test my skills on... so I'd say we're about even. I mean, when you're only making yourself a meal it's not as satisfying, and I usually (when my mom decides to forgo making dinner) resort to having half a bag of goldfish crackers for dinner instead of actually cooking a meal.

I don't think cooking (as a womanly duty) is a requirement in a relationship though by any means. My grandparents were more than happy, and my grandmother couldn't cook to save her life. That, was my grandpa's thing. If he wasn't cooking you ate out and that's just how it went.

But as for my favorite meal to cook, I love making curried chicken, it's really very easy. I buy premade curry sauces at Trader Joes, some chicken/and or tofu, veggies, and rice, and trow it together. Very simple and very fast.

I am NOT domestic, so when I do cook for my Love, it's generally things I learned to make when I was 12, also fending for myself... tacos, spaghetti, hb helper. My dear boyfriend acts as though I've created a gourmet meal everytime, though :)(I really think it's just so I'll keep cooking- anything I make, simple or not, is better than what he's willing to attempt!)

I feel your pain here. My husband's mother cooked everything from scratch, and it's all country food seasoned with nothing but a ton of salt and bacon grease. Yuck. We have very different tastes in food. At first I tried to do things just like his Mom did, but honestly, I'll be damned if I air dry all his Tshirts so they won't shrink. Remember, you're not his mother, you're his girlfriend. You didn't take him to raise.

LMAO! I feel your pain! Me and my boyfriend have found the optimal solution: we cook separately and do our laundry separately as well. People think we're nuts but it works, and besides I would never eat the food he eats or else I would be three times my current size!

I am not a skilled chef by any means, but just had a bowl of "home made" sauteed mixed seafood, baby spinach and brown rice. BF was very impressed, but of course he would never touch any of it... he's fine with his pizza or peanut butter sammies (no jelly here).

Hi :)I am the total same way. When I lived by myself for 3 years, it was take-out or cereal. Then I started cooking for my bf and it was a rare thing. When I am hungry, I want to eat right then. I don't think about food when I am not hungry. So cooking a meal that took an hour was like pure torture. After finding easy recipes I started cooking more and enjoyed it. there are still many times where I just want cereal or a frozen burrito. it does help to cook together.

we just got an electric wok and we made stir-fry tonight. i do a few things and he does some other stuff and we eat together.

When the Ex and I first moved in together, for a month straight everything I cooked had the same mushy starch-and-protein-in-thick-sauce consistency. Eventually I learned to switch it up.

As for good, easy things to cook I'm always one for tacos. All you have to do is make the meat, open a some salsa and cheese and maybe chop up some lettuce. Plus if you season your own you can significantly lower how much of that dreaded balloon-making sodium is in them.

This exchange is so hilarious. I'm afraid in my house I'm the "What's for dinner" whiner. But fortunately I like to cook, so I usually answer the question myself and get to work. In desperate moments when I cannot deal with cooking or ordering in, we'll open up a can of chili or something.

Oh God, this is my biggest fear if/when I actually find someone who can put up with me (and vice versa) and actually live with. Sometimes I love to cook - like tonight I made a swordfish panini with arugula and lemon aioli (got a panini press for Christmas and had to test it out with something more than nutella on bread). But some nights, a bagel and cream cheese is fine for me. Or toast. Or something frozen that tastes like cardboard. I'm holding out to marry a chef.

My favorite thing to cook? Food. I'm hungry about every 3 or 4 hours. Lol, I kid... kind of... ;) I am blessed with the Li'l Suzy Homemaker gene in the kitchen, but more often than not, due to time and money constraints (yeah, the whole dancer thing = no money), I do quickie food... case in point: tonight's dinner was mac 'n cheese and canned green beans. Gourmet, baby!

On the rare occasion I do whip out a full meal a la the Iron Chef, I do Italian. I would love to learn to cook Moroccan, that's my next kitchen project...

Erik and I buy a ridiculous amount of food from Trader Joe's, so we "heat" more than cook. But my mom bought me a Jamie Oliver cookbook for Christmas which I'm excited to try out in 2010 and hopefully accomplish one of my goal's on my 101 Things list (I better hurry - it ends September 28!)

My mom and I fight about this ALL of the time. Neither of us ever wants to pick...or actually cook it. To solve this, I've started to learn to cook. My mom watches and gives instruction and I do the manual labor. It works out pretty well.

Thanks for the comment and I LOVE your comment about you and you love's upbringing. My husband and I are exactly the same way only I am the one with the mother who was at home when I got home from school. And when she HAD to work, she worked at our school so she was always near. our family was very traditional. My husband grew up totally different. His parents both worked, they never went on vacation (we road tripped the whole country during the summer) and they never ate in their dining room (we ate in our on sundays). But somehow, we love each other! :)

hahaha... interestingly enough I never knew people cooked certain items at according to the altitude until a few weeks ago. A girl a work commented on how difficult it is to make fudge in FL because of the altitude. I was baffled.

Most of my good healthy, easy, cheap, ready for you when you walk in the door meals are done via crock pot. Just throw a bunch of stuff in in the morning to make chili, chicken noodle soup, cabbage soup, pot roast, whatever... and TA DA when you get home all you have to do is fill your bowl. It's fabulous.

i LOVE this post! i guess i was the female version of your love in this situation :-/my mum has a zillion cookbooks and when she's not at work, she's in the kitchen! lately i've been helping her out when i go home..the other day we made chicken and biscuits from rick bayless' cookbook. another amazing cookbook is the pioneer woman (it's complete with lots of pretty pictures and a cute love story)

and as for my fave/signature dish... mac and cheese!!

so not conducive to the post holiday "i need to get rid of my gut" thing. but it's worth it.

Thanks so much for the comment!! It meant so much to me :) Love your blog. The "what to do for dinner" conundrum has haunted many of my relationships also. My favorite thing to cook? cereal: captain crunch with some ice cold milk-it's a perfect breakfast, lunch, dinner or dessert. The all inclusive meal and it's easy :) good luck with your quest into domesticity!

I'm marrying a chef. really lucked out on that one...except for the 20-30ish pounds he packed on me...before we started dating i was a vegetarian that ate nothing but vegetables...after brian got me hooked on pasta and bread hence the weight gain!! With our wedding a year away I don't let him cook for me anymore!! Me and frozen bags veggies are bffs!

i like the idea of cooking together - i was brought up with a culinarily disabled mother and an overly busy father, so i had to learn to cook for myself very early. i hate the stereotype of "the wife/girlfriend/woman as cook." i cook with friends, with boyfriends, but never for them. i am not domestic. i don't want to be boxed into that corner. may you have many more exciting (non)domestic adventures with your luuurve!

My favorite is a filipino dish called pancit and lumpia... I can't seemt o cook american foods, but that's because my mother couldn't cook it either. Neither could her mother before that. I was destined to never cook. That's just how it is.

My favorite thing to cook that my mom taught me to make and I used to make for my ex was chicken parmesan.. I called it "love chicken" hahaha. You should try it! Its pretty easy, even I could do it. And really, chicken and spaghetti are two of my favorite meals so why not

I stick with Rachel Ray's 30 minute meals because I uhhhhhh suck at cooking.

Thankfully S and I aren't living together yet (haha I think this might be the only reason I am thankful we are long distance!?) In the meantime I have to get my ass in cooking gear - because apparently his mom is the god of cooking.

I actually like cooking, but my loves and my tastes differ a lot. Well, maybe not our tastes, per se, but the fact that he could live off pizza and wings and I would like to eat salads. But...I use a lot of Rachael Ray's recipe's too. They usually use pretty common ingredients that are easy to find and use. They're flavorful, and a lot are healthy for us girls too!

Aw this post is really cute!! My fiance and I like to cook together a lot! Our favorite meal to cook is turkey tacos which are a healthy alternative to his own vat of grease tacos! I'm having similar issues with learning how to live with someone else. The idea of compromising everything that you are accustomed to for someone else is a little daunting. Thanks for sharing this with us!!

I actually just made a big lasagna tonight for the first time in my life. We're getting married this year so I'm trying to fast-track my domestic training so that I can be a good wife (ha ha). My favourite thing to make is squash curry.....it's vegan actually, and neither of us are, but it's delicious!!! I've posted a few of my favourite recipes on my blog. The lasagna was really rewarding though!! And not actually that hard...just takes a few hours start to finish. And the best part.....lunch for the next 3 days!!!!

I love your comment about the "signature" thing to cook that everyone asks for....I'm still working on it! Good luck to you :)

I am your straight out of the book domestic little housewife without being a wife or living with my now boyfriend (but we plan on it soon). I love to clean, cook, and anything else stereotypical.

Luckily I have the boyfriend who thinks my potato pancakes are divine (aka easily pleased). I grew up with a good cook for a mother so I try my hardest. I'm good at cooking but I feel like that will come in more so when we are actually moved in.

The book "How To Cook Everything" by Mark Bitman is really good. It's simple and has a ton of options.

Chelsea, your posts are always so freakin funny. And ahahah I can barely freeze ice or toast some bread :PI nearly burned the house down while attempting to make some fudge. I kid you not. I am now barred from the stove, oven and microwave.

Sounds just like our house! Sweet Britches eats nothing unless fried in large amounts of grease. And since I don't have any formiable "homemaker" skills, he cooks all the time.... I've gained 12 lbs. since we moved in together.

i am still trying to figure out the whole feed the family thing, but even still trying to figure it out we got married in the meantime! the most infuriating thing i get is when i ask what they want and the response is what do we have? HATE IT!!!!!

The idea of cooking together is beautiful - and idealistic. I don't really think it's realistic though, nor will you have time to keep it up in the long run.Like you said, there's a lot of compromise when you're living together, but that's all part of building a life together right? Because whatever schedule you come up, that'll be YOUR schedule.

I would say, definitely try to learn to cook a few dishes, even if you're not regularly "the chef."As for take-out, you can decide to do it once or twice a week without hammering down an exact schedule.

I recently moved out on my own and have learned that cooking and leftovers can be a girls best friend when living on a budget - and having a disposal income that general goes to new shoes. For holiday this year my family bought me many gifts for the kitchen! Take it slow and start with dishes you like to eat. With the winter months upon us, Soup seems to be an easy one pot option. I used a recipe from my grandmother and I kid you not, people thought I slaved over it all day; when in actuality it only took one hour. Add some french bread on the side and your good to go!

With all 685484 comments, you may not see this one, but trust me, if you don't have one? Buy a crockpot like, yesterday. Easiest thing ever. I usually just chop up a few chicken breasts, some potatoes, onions, and carrots (all in big chunks to save time), throw in some chicken broth and spices and turn it on low in the morning.

Here are a couple more easy ones:2 bags of boil in the bag brown riceA couple of chicken breasts, again chopped in big piecesHalf a yellow onion chopped upA small can of green chiliesA jar of salsa1 can of cream of mushroom (or onion whatever) soupGrated cheese

1. Sautee the chicken with the onions and chilies and remove when it's almost done. Season it with whatever you want.2. Boil the rice at the same time.3. Mix the salsa and soup together.4. Dump it all in a casserole dish and mush together. Top with cheese. Bake 30 minutes @350.

I love that recipe because you can add black beans if you want, leave out all the salt, make it as spicy as you like, etc.

If you like crab meat, my old roommate used to make pasta, sautee (usually imitation) crab meat with fresh garlic in a little butter, and then top it all with parmesan. It was surprisingly awesome for as quick and easy as it is.

I had the same issue when I first moved in with my husband (then boyfriend)! My room was a disaster, I could cook only ramen noodles, I was not even close to domestic! Then, I realized it's actually fun to try new recipes. I got a bunch of cookbooks and just started trying things. My favorites are one-dish meals. They look all fancy and taste like it was really hard, but it's easy as hell. I'll send you a few recipes if you want...

holy shit you have a lot of comments here! looks like you are set for life on the cooking recipe thing.

my two cents: tacoes.

i lurve making tacoes with extra lean ground beef and veggies and sour cream and all that good stuff. soft or hard shell, both are good. they're pretty easy as long as you can cook a pan of hamburg, drain it, pour some water on it and then mix in the taco seasoning. the rest is just spooning and cutting.

Ah the dramas of communal cuisine! Always harder when you live with someone else who is a self-professed domestic goddess - I end up feeling like I can't even make toast properly! You have my sympathies. And sorry for making you miss London!

I'm from a fend for yourself family too! It's probably part of the reason I was so fat as a kid, I was eating bagels and cereal for dinner three nights a week. (I still crave cereal at night.)

I started learning to cook with cook books first, then figured out what I liked and began experimenting with spice.

I'm with Grace too though, foodie blogs are very inspirational.

Here's one of my favorite, kinda but not really healthy quick eats: immerse brussel sprouts in boiling water and let boil until tender. While boiling cook up three to five slices of bacon. Remove the bacon, blot off extra grease, and chop coarsely. THEN when the little sprouties are ready, strain them and put them in the same pan you cooked the bacon in, turn the heat on low, add the chopped bacon back in, salt and pepper to taste.

Ugh, just the idea of trying to get my boyfriend and I on the same page for a TIME for dinner is hard enough. He's that guy who's mom had dinner ready at 5pm every day and I was lucky if I had dinner on the table by 7:30pm.

We go back and forth w/meals as well, but he does know how to cook a little. The problem is that he'd rather have a ham & cheese sandwich every single day for dinner instead. I like variety, even if that variety is cereal one day and yogurt or cheese & crackers the next.

I think my resolution needs to be cooking more. I can bake fine (and even cook) is just don't WANT TO.

You crack me up! I'm terrible at cooking, myself. But there's a slight problem in the fact that I live for food; no pun intended. Oh well ... maybe I'll have to learn to break out my cook books! Or just order take-out for the rest of my life ...

I like to think of myself as more of an Unodemstic Goddess. Basically, that's just a nice way of saying that the majority of what I eat is cold, toasted (and oftentimes burnt), and ready-made. My forays in the kitchen most often go awry. I too eat a lot of peanut butter straight from the jar!! :)

When we first moved in together cooking was always something of a challenge.. I'd come from a series of apartments with lousy flatmates and convenience food, and he'd come straight from home where his mum would've been making breakfast, dinner, any snacks he wanted, anything at all... so the first few months we kind of tried stuff together, before falling into a bit of a schedule of pasta, pizza, sometimes meat & potatoes... over the holidays though we got an AWESOME cookbook, with pictures and a whole section on meals under 30 minutes - so this week we're actually going to try a couple of meals from scratch.

He has the same issue with sodium in stir fry sauces too, so once he tried making a sauce from scratch - the meal basically ended up rice and vegetables covered in a slimy, watery, tasteless substance and I refused to ever let him do it again lol

May I suggest hiring a houseboy to cook meals for you and your boyfriend?

My man and I took in a friend who needed a place to live and just happens to cook for a living and have a French culinary education. We never have to fight about dinner! One of us says, "Honey, what's for dinner?" and the other says, "I dunno, ask Mr. C."

Then we stare at Mr. C, and Mr. C sighs and grumbles about having to cook all day at work and then whips up a four-star meal out of the scraps and condiments in the fridge, and we all eat happily ever after.

Well I suppose I'm a little late on this post seeing as you have ONE HUNDRED THIRTY EIGHT comments. Jesus Lord I'm a little jealous. Regardless, I am totally with ya on the 'being a girlfriend suddenly means I have to cook?' garbage?? What is that. Seriously.

Well, since I've had this fight many many many times in my life, we usually end up ordering pizza. I've probably eaten more pizza in the last 6 years than I have in the 20 years preceeding that. We eat SO much pizza. So of course, we're trying to stop and blah blah and I'm trying to cook. But it sucks.

I can currently make hamburgers (like bomb ones), really good spaghetti sauce, and fajitas. Those are my bomb meals. Other than that I can't make anything.

hehe. this entry made me laugh, a lot. i can totally sympathize but luckily my boyfriend loves to cook and i work more days a week than he does so it's generally accepted that he cooks, though i will occasionally when i'm in the mood. i'm still learning his dislikes though so i sometimes include an ingredient he can't stand. :\ great post!

Oh this made me laugh because we have the same conversations at home when I visit. I'm not a big cooker at all but friends at work have been good about encouraging me. I like making chili and now with my new crock pot, I'm ready to bust it out!

I'm all about cooking together too. Except one person has to be the sous chef b/c we have control issues ;) Our newest thing we like to cook together is homemade pizza. We get the already-formed dough from Trader Joes, add our own toppings (he's a big meat man, I'm a veggie girl) and viola, we're both happy :)

Although I was raised to sit around the table every night with a home cooked meal, I have a hard time doing that with my hubby. We both get into the "lets just have sandwiches and call it a night" funk. So sad.

I used to be the exact same way. But now I'm the one with perfectly planned meals and the handmade seasonal placemats. It took having a kid to whip me into shape, but you might be able to get going early. Start with simple meals that you really like to eat - so you'll have good motivation to cook. Once you get into it and see that can do it, you'll feel more confident. Good luck!

I am uber domestic especially in la cucina. I love Giada's cookbooks and have about 20 cookbooks just on baking. YUM YUM and YUM. You dont have to eat plain M&Ms for dinner when you can bake them into brownies!

I don't cook. My boyfriend does. i had the great stir-fry disaster of 2008, where I made stir-fry that made my boyfried sick in his mouth, so since then I've been banned from the kitchen and I'm quite happy with that set-up!

Ohhh, Chelsea! Actually...I love making stir fry or lasagna, because they are both so smack lovin' easy :)! I don't cook as often as I'd like, but at my age...{way older than you}...I've learned that men love, not only watching a woman cook, but hearing a woman Talk about what/how they are going to cook {in reality, I talk food better than I cook it}...and I'll bet when you make that pb&j {with the edges trimmed off} you are Golden!ahh, you just gave me a New Year's resolution...cook more!

You crack me up! But definitely laughing WITH not AT :D I love to cook, so that's what I do...but man I cannot clean up after myself. Or keep a room tidy for five minutes. And I'm hopeless with a washing machine too. So it balances out :) If I'm a little bit hungry but don't feel like a huge meal, I just steam or boil up a huge pan of edamame beans (like the ones you get at wagamama) and pick at them all night...so yum, filling, and really good for you!

Truthfully, I only cook if I'm eating with the husband. I never cook for myself. I don't really see a point? Plus, the husband says I require supervision. Whatever. I only left the oven on by accident three times....

PS? Thanks for your good thoughts for Maddie and her seizures! I really, truly appreciate it.

haha!this happens in our house all the time - im like you (i also illogically think that surviving on toast and tea will leave more money for shopping), and my bf's like your's! good to see that other have this problem as well :p

how do you get soo many comments? haha. well the idea of being that woman scares the shit out of me. i will never be that! and, i do want to learn how to cook.. that's a goal for 2010 in fact.. but, i just well never be that 'perfect'. :P

That was my solution as well. I like cooking to an extent but was never taught how. He had to live on his own long enough that he figured out some basics. So together we can make a pretty good meal. And a cooking magazine called 'Cooking for Two' really helped take the stress out of it. Because then I don't have to do math.

Wow, your bf was living the lifeeeee as a kid, haha. I love your guys' solution for it, though, to cook together and to compromise. It's a fun activity that, in a sense, glues you two together even more. Anyway, you've got a ton of comments on this post and I doubt you'll even read this, but I just wanted to say thank you so much for the kind words you left on my previous blog post. It truly means a lot.

I am a cooking junkie-swing by my blog and check out the "Crap that I cook" category. It has step by step instructions that always include drinking a lot of wine while stirring and flipping, etc.I think the cooking together deal is a kick ass idea. Add booze to the equation and it's PERFECT!

Someone really should write a instruction manual for living with men. I'm planning on writing a book called "How to Train Your Husband"...if I ever figure it out. I'll make millions right? Hubby and I have the dinner argument all the time. And no one ever tells you that you have to give up some of your favorite foods if your man doesn't like them. I mean, I guess I could cook those dishes anyway, but then I'd be a balloon too after I ate all that. Sigh. It's a good thing men are cute.

I used to cook something good every night,when I had little kids and a husband who never bothered to stick around for the dinner, or the little kids.But, I kept trying until I found a fabulous man who loves to cook! And, usually he would prefer to make it, than eat my version of the recipe! LOL! Plus little kids just can't stay away from him! But, I love Savannah's pasta recipe! And, baked chicken with lemon is always good.Salad's are filling and good for you, if you put all the good things in!

I'm kind of in the opposite boat here. I'm trying to learn to cook (because my mom is of the sort who just throws stuff together sans recipe and can't really tell me how to make anything because you know "you just do it" yeah....) and my boyfriend keeps telling me not to worry about it- we'll just go out or order in and then won't have to grocery shop or do the dishes after. I admit, he has a point and it's really nice to know I don't ever have to cook a damn thing. BUT, I've got all the kitchen stuff and sometimes want to. It's an uphill battle.

I love your blog already and just started. You totally introduced me the word housegirlfriend, because really it should be a standard term for all us women living in sin. Or maybe I'm just late to the game. Anyways, if you are successful on how to get him to cook with you, please draft Chapter 3 "how to get the guy to do whatever the heck you want - without tears" because the closest I can get the houseboyfriend to cook, are when there is bread, cheese and ketchup and he suddenly wants to cook grilled cheese 24/7. Hope you ended up eating m&m's.

Thank goodness G & I both like to cook, him more than me. I like to bake more...so we create a good balance when one or both of us is in the kitchen. Most of our compromise will have to do with cleaning & organization I think...