Umpires at The Ashes: Meet the men in white coats

Dominican former football referee who was the other umpire during the abandoned Oval Test of 2006, when Darrell Hair and the Pakistan team had a minor disagreement

How he gives them Leers quizzically at his subject then sends 'em packing

Aleem Dar,Pakistan

First Test

Calm and inconspicuous – received death threats along with Steve Bucknor in South Africa in 2005

How he gives them Nods his head, lifts his finger urgently and then looks the other way with a disgust

Rudi Koertzen,South Africa

Second and third Tests

Gruff umpire of 99 Tests, including the bad-tempered affair between England and Sri Lanka in Kandy in 2001, the umpiring of which Wisden described as 'execrable'.

How he gives them The slowest of slow deaths. Makes his decisions quickly but then raises his left index finger with all the speed of a constipated tortoise

Billy Bowden,New Zealand

Fourth and fifth Tests

Amiable showman, right, whose ostentatious approach to umpiring – he has his own take on how to signal fours, sixes and much else besides – often obscures a brilliant talent. Martin Crowe once described him as 'Bozo the Clown'.

How he gives them With a thrust of the crooked finger of doom, a consequence of the arthritis he first suffered in his twenties

Asad Rauf,Pakistan

Fourth and fifth Tests

Imperiously coiffured. Has presided over a number of controversies in his short career, most notably during an ODI between West Indies and India when he allowed a ball to be bowled even though the square-leg umpire was not on the field

How he gives them

By raising his finger with the minimum of fuss. Maybe it will catch on