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Monthly Archives: September 2009

I put up a billboard at the entrance of Linkyshire.
It says, “Linkyshire, the perfect place.”
I think that sums it up nicely for anyone entering our village.
I want people to know that Linkyshire is perfect.
I think the Linkyshire Committee will be happy about it.
For example, in Evantonian they run over their pigeons
with big truck tires.
Here in Linkyshire we treasure our pigeons.
Knowing that, don’t you want to live here?

Caught Ruth in the lobby today.
I was going up.
She was going down, figuratively, I mean.
She said she was going away.
Anywhere.
Paul was driving her crazy,
so she was going to drive away.
She did have her keys in hand.
Turns out, Paul was building a wooden boat
in their apartment because he wanted to sail away.

On the way to my Gran’s I had to drive through Evantonian.
Ugh.
Tall buildings block out the sun.
Shadows are everywhere.
People’s clothes are dull.
Their skin is dull.
Their TVs are dull and
the local news is therefore dull.
Dull, dull, dull.
Once over the bridge I could almost taste
Gran’s cookies & milk.
Her smile was worth the trip.

Turns out Arbo is a kid around the corner from me.
I must have seen him at some point before my dream.
His hair shoots out of his head at an angle like an anime character.
He likes soccer and the XBox 360.
He says he likes to drive off buildings,
shoot pigeons, and kill his employers,
on the XBox 360, of course.
How do you avoid the police?
Cheats, he says.
He fits right into our community here.
Makes me think I should get some dangerous hobby.

Every time I go to the coffee shop
there’s this fly.
He lands on the back of a chair
or the table
or my computer
or my hand.
Yuk.
I hate flies.
I’m sure it is the same fly every day.
He looks the same and
he always lands in the same places.
Someday I’m going to kill him.
I should be able to do that soon.
Fall is almost here.
Hurray for Fall.

The topic today was Linkyshire’s future.
Everyone attended a meeting.
We all shouted ‘hurray’ for Linkyshire
and went home feeling sound and content.
The police looked happy too.
The infectious attitude swept into Evantonian I’m sure.
This happy wave was reported in the big city paper.
We rock.