Jos. A. Bank Attempts To Fend Off Men’s Wearhouse Get Weirder

Everyone was getting bored with the constant drama in the Men’s Wearhouse/Jos. A. Bank saga, and we ran out of “gonna like the way you look” jokes weeks ago. That’s why Joey B. decided to mix things up last week and make what seems like a completely random offer to acquire Eddie Bauer.

Why Eddie Bauer? Nobody really knows. Analysts and experts are puzzled, and neither company is talking to the press. The company declared bankruptcy in 2009, and was acquired by private equity firm Golden Gate Partners.

The only possible explanation for the talks, experts speculate, is to make Jos. A. Bank’s prospects look worse and make it a less tempting candidate for acquisition.

Meanwhile, renowned retail expert Jerry Seinfeld weighed in on the merger and acquisition mating dance in an interview with Buzzfeed.

“I want to know how..Jos. A. Bank, could they advertise more? Could they sell less? They advertise, ‘We’ll give you three suits for eight dollars! Just take it! Just take it and get it out of here. It’s crap, nobody wants it.’ Then Men’s Wearhouse says, ‘We want more crap. We don’t have enough of this crap of our own.'”