Posts by deb singh

Hello dear Shameless readers!
I was so inspired by Letters Lived: Radical Reflections, Revolutionary Paths edited by our very own Shameless editor, Sheila Sampath, that I came back after taking a blogging break and wrote my own letter.
Letters Lived is an inspiring short read from writers and activists writing to their younger selves, as adults. Ever want to reassure, guide or share your 20/20 hindsight with yourself after the fact? Letters Lived offers that very promise. … READ MORE

I feel angry. I feel upset. I feel anxious (actually, I haven’t said that last one to Adli yet!) These are statements I make to Adli when I want to express my emotions. I want him - currently as a cisgender boy - to learn to express his feelings, however artificial it may seem at first.
I also have been trying to talk about oppression. How do I educate and support the learning of my kid … READ MORE

Content Warning: References to Orlando Pulse Nightclub massacre.
I think I know why U.S. and Canadian media outlets need to call the Orlando Pulse Nightclub massacre, the “the deadliest shooting in U.S. history, with 50 (sic) people killed, 53 others injured and the gunman dead in a shootout”.
Because America loves violence.
To read more about what went down.
Hear me out: They actually love it. I recently read a post that said that guns are part of American … READ MORE

At the Top of the ‘Class’: Growing Up and Class Background
Adli is growing up with some of the best things in life: a loving parent and being raised in a violence-free home.
Adli has an educated parent who makes a steady salary and has access to fresh vegetables and organic milk.
Adli lives in a big city, with access to diverse people, cultures, resources and spaces.
Adli was breastfed.
What do these things have to do with class or … READ MORE

Trigger Warning: Discussions of Rape Culture
The Law: Not Here for Survivors
When survivors go to report a sexual assault to the police, statistically speaking: the police do nothing.
It may be their job – at the very least – to listen to survivors by taking their statements but after that, on the most part, nothing more is done to validate the experience of the survivor.
And why would anything be done? The system has proven time and time … READ MORE

Please note, this post has been updated since first published as the original version uploaded did not properly display the entire post.
So I have a partner, going on 9 years, and I still feel awkward and scared to masturbate in front of her. I know, TMI. But that is exactly my point.
In this dominant western culture, we have a problem with openly talking about sexuality, being openly sexual, and women’s racialized and queer sexualities themselves.
We … READ MORE

Trigger Warning: Assault and Violence
On March 24th, 2016 Jian Ghomeshi was found not guilty on 3 counts of sexual assault and one count of choking, overcoming resistance by Judge William Horkins.
Below is the collectively written speech one of our most esteemed counselors read at the evening action that brought together the issues of survivorship and sexual violence and anti-Black racism. Organizers from Black Lives Matter, Ryerson Centre for Women and Trans People, Ryerson Office for … READ MORE

It’s a social experiment but we are making the blog series “Queer Brown Girl Trying to be a Parent” into a column! So get ready for a monthly blog about all things Queer, Brown and Parenting! READ MORE

CONTENT WARNNG: This blog includes personal information about family violence , domestic violence and child abuse. READ MORE

As cisgender mothers, there is a ton of stuff we just plain feel guilty about. It’s all rooted in good old fashioned sexism - part and parcel with how we are supposed to love our children in opposition to loving ourselves and be self sacrificial at all costs and turns.
This is impossible. Like it’s physically impossible to care for someone without support or at the very least some time to care for yourself as well. … READ MORE

It’s a social experiment but we are making the blog series “Queer Brown Girl Trying to be a Parent” into a column! So get ready for a monthly blog about all things Queer, Brown and Parenting! READ MORE

CONTENT WARNNG: This blog includes personal information about family violence , domestic violence and child abuse. READ MORE

When Adli popped out of me the day he was born, the first thing I said was ‘You’re a person’. I was obviously exhausted and slightly delirious but I knew exactly what I said, but not exactly what I meant. It is pretty incredible, a miracle some might say, to have a human develop in your body, a place once occupied only by tissue and blood and have an actual person come out after 40 … READ MORE

It’s a social experiment but we are making the blog series “Queer Brown Girl Trying to be a Parent” into a column! So get ready for a monthly blog about all things Queer, Brown and Parenting! This month’s blog: Polyamory and Parenting. READ MORE

The Toronto Rape Crisis Centre/Multicultural Women Against Rape and Black Lives Matter – Toronto are pleased to announce the 35th annual Take Back the Night happening on Saturday September 26th, 2015 at Scadding Court Community Centre (707 Dundas St. West).
This year’s theme is: “All Black Lives Matter: Black Communities Take Back the Night” This year’s theme speaks to the anti-Black racism centering the experiences of Black women, Black queer and trans people along the gender … READ MORE

It’s a social experiment but we are making the blog series “Queer Brown Girl Trying to be a Parent” into a column! So get ready for a monthly blog about all things Queer, Brown and Parenting! READ MORE

CONTENT WARNNG: This blog includes personal information about family violence , domestic violence and child abuse. READ MORE

It’s a social experiment but we are making the blog series “Queer Brown Girl Trying to be a Parent” into a column! So get ready for a monthly blog about all things Queer, Brown and Parenting! This month’s blog: Sex and Parenting. READ MORE

Most recently I read two articles that spoke to the fact that once a movement focuses on one set of victims/survivors of sexual violence, that movement must be excluding the other victims/victims.
First, Angela Mullins wrote in Metro views on May 26th that she wanted to start a men’s movement. This was because she believed that the movement to end sexual violence and the newest campaign by the province of Ontario ‘It’s Never Okay’ excludes men … READ MORE

Hello dedicated readers! This is my 40th blog entry with Shameless Magazine. Attention must be paid!
First, I would like to thank every reader who has ever spent their valuable time reading my entries. I truly appreciate you and thank you for caring what I think about stuff.
Second, a major appreciation to Sheila, Julia, Meg and Naz for working with me over the past 40 blogs. I am so grateful for your confidence and for allowing … READ MORE

As a privileged person, I was able to access many resources during my Maternity Leave to learn how to be a better parent. And, I accessed those resources. Like everything in my life, I achieve by learning so it was no surprise that I took full advantage of the City of Toronto’s Public Health departments parenting resources.
For one, I started with the online prenatal classes, and, I was able to take 2 more Mom’s groups … READ MORE