Friday, 8 December 2017

This Mother Was Shamed For Being 'Too Big' For Her Clothes

Last weekend, Charli Stevens was minding her own business while shopping with her 5-month-old son in a Columbus supermarket.

Suddenly, an older woman in the store began casting critical stares in her direction. The situation escalated when the woman approached Charli and decided to make a bunch of unsolicited, judgmental remarks about her body.

The experience quickly turned emotional for Charli, who decided to share her story — as well as a powerful message about respect — on Facebook.

Charli was Christmas shopping at her local Kroger when she first noticed the woman staring at her.

"I hate when people stare but didn't say or do anything," remembers Charli.

"A couple minutes later, she came up to me and said 'I think your clothes are a little too small on you.' 😳 😳 " Charli was wearing the outfit you see below.

"Completely caught off guard and baffled and also hoping she didn't say what I thought she said, I said, 'Excuse me?'"

"And she said, 'Well no offense but you're just a bit big to wear those type of clothes.'"

"Instant tears. I didn't know what to say," wrote Charli.

Whenever someone starts a sentence off with, "Well no offense," it's pretty much guaranteed that whatever they're about to say next will be offensive.

I wonder what that woman was shopping for... Maybe a heart? A life?

"She said, 'I'm not trying to be mean but maybe just reconsider your outfit before leaving your house from now on.'"

Woooooooooooow, who does this woman think she is? The level of audacity here is astounding.

"She walked away and I just stood there at the cart with [my son] looking at me," wrote Charli, "I was literally crying in the middle of the Christmas aisle at Kroger. I left without buying anything and sat in my car and cried."

"How are people so rude? It's no secret that I've gained weight throughout life. I've birthed two kids so it's bound to happen."

"Do I realize I'm overweight? Yes. Do I want to be smaller? Yes. But am I okay with the way I look? Yes!! Why would a complete stranger go out of their way to insult someone?" wrote Charli.

We're honestly wondering the same thing.

"What if I was severely depressed? Or what if I was constantly made fun of for my weight and that one comment from that stranger pushed me over the edge?" added Charli, raising an important point about bullying and mental health

"Luckily, I'm neither of those things. But people have got to start being nice. Having common sense. Being respectful."

"This lady knew nothing about me," she wrote, "I had my 5-month-old son in the cart and I am SO thankful my 4-year-old wasn't with me to witness what happened."

"This lady also doesn't know that I've lost nearly 50 pounds from my heaviest weight before having [my son] — but apparently that's not good enough. My clothes were tighter than what I would normally wear but so what?! It shouldn't matter what people wear," added Charli.

Frankly, Charli shouldn't even have to contemplate the tightness of her clothing. That woman's words are a reflection of her own ignorance and not of Charli's outfit or body.

"Please, PLEASE, have some respect for people."

"You never know what someone is going through or if your one little comment, snicker, stare, whatever will be enough to break someone down or push them over the edge," wrote Charli.

"I'm not writing this for sympathy but just as a plea to anyone who might read this to just be nice and have respect for people. I fear for my daughter to grow up in this world. We've gotta set a good example for our children," she added.

What we need is more acceptance, empathy, and respect. Those other things — like shame and judgment — can take a hike.

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