That’s how I used to call myself when I were in junior high school.“Ami” is my nick name in my family,,, n’ I Did love to read and watch Sailormoon’s series. I love blue color just like Ami. I love the Mercury planet just like Ami. I love to play chess, I love to swim, I love to read, I wear glasses, I love music and even play Electone, Piano and guitar for myself and I’m 14 years old just like Ami Mizuno.

I’m shy and I don’t make friends very easy… I don’t have any boy to be loved. And I’m always dream of being a princess like Ami.

It’s even better when I entered Muthahhari Senior High School in Bandung. That making-friend-things are gettin me crazy…It’s not easy tough…but I finally made it. I even got myself involved in the “BMR-13” gang. Time’s changing, n’ I found myself in grade 3rd, the last grade. And I’m starting to think about my future. Weirdly, I found myself wandering on a destiny in studying Medical in German (because there’re a lot of Muthahhari’s student ended up studying in German)..OMG…this is exactly JUST LIKE AMI!

And just like Ami, I didn’t go to German. But stay here in Indonesia, studying medical in Hasanuddin University.

Here, my life turned up side down…

I never think about Ami anymore…My nick name here is “Ame’”…I got many friends…I fell in love with a great man (though now he’s gone)…I enjoy many extracurricular…I never swim, or play chess again… I got a long hair,..I got bored easily, I stopped playing Piano, Electone, and guitar. Instead of listening to those classical music from Mozart, Bach, and Richard Clayderman…I’d prefer pop and latest hits music.

But just like a wheel and circle of life…

just like the mercury planet. just like Ami mizuno, just like sailor mercury whom power is using water but the fact says that Mercury is the hottest planet in this galaxy... I'm a paradox girl...just like the paradox mercury and it's hot and flaming blue lights but it means "water" at the same....

Today, Saturday, 31st October when I saw my face on the mirror…(again with this “bad-hair” appearance)…

I looked closer…n’ realizing that this….is…just like my old hair when I was In junior high school!

This is the hair cutting of Ami Mizuno!

I looked around… to my empty room, empty house, empty inbox…n’ realizing that I feel like I don’t have many friends…I’m at home…and I’m bringing this old, big, patophisiology book. I don’t have any boy to love, I still have my piano and guitar. And my feelings getting blue…So..today…

One of my friend had just lost the same feeling with me…Do you know? She really enjoys her feeling right now…No wonder her face getting radiant every day now, I got surprised…really…She gets me to her words…“me chan…let me tell you a story…One of my friend had just married…n’ do you know?? After marriage, there’s only one thing that she regret the most…”Me : “ what is it?”“what she regrets the most is the fact that she ever fall in love with somebody but not her husband… he regrets that her hand…her face…her arms… had ever been touched by her ex-boyfriend”Me : “….”

That’s it girl…that’s it me can…

Lucky that i’ve never been touched… though my eyes…my mind…n’ my soul had ever been with that man… but lucky that I’ve never let myself to be touched…

Remember there is God over there…looking at you…wishing the best for you…Allah is The Greatest…The mercyfull…He’ll listen to you…