first of all I am not good with constructive criticism I will tell you the good and the bad. Good: You have a strong start you let us get in the head of Hermione and Sarah. Bad: you might have a full head and get of track. (no more bad) you do have a strong start though:)

Author's Response: No, no, I wouldn't say no hope. That's why it's not abandoned yet. I like this story still, I really do. I'm just...frusterated with it right now. I've drafted chapter 2 literally five times, and they keep getting lost, or stolen, or put in the toilet (ew)... Ya. It stinks. So I kinda want this to go away right now. I hope to update this, however, it won't be a novel anymore. I have a much better "homeless child" story line. So, I hope to update, I really do! Thanks so much for the compliments!!!

Great descriptive language (though I'm not entirely sure than Starbucks is that popular in England...it's more American I think...meh...) The way you described the station and Sarah was absolutely excellent. However, the the way Sarah talked was a bit odd. I don't think street kids would be calling anyone "ma’am" in the time this is set in and I think she'd be a bit more cautious. Still, I really enjoyed it and look forward to an update.

Have a nice day! :-)

Author's Response: Thanks! Yes, I was aware faintly of the Starbucks mention; I wasn't sure what else to put in there. Is there a major coffee chain in Britian? Anyhow, I'm glad that you liked Sarah, and there is a bit of a reason that she talks in this way. It should be revealed soon (in theory). Thanks so much, and I'll try to update soon! However, I have a new novel-ish story that is almost a carbon copy of this, only the guardians are different, and the OC is better written, I think. Her name shall be Ana. Anyhow, thanks again!

Very good start that you have. One thing that you could improve on is descripitions. You probably could have put some more descirpition into what Sarah looks like and them going to Hermione's place.

Author's Response: Thanks! I have quite a bit of Hermione's house in chappie 2 (which had a draft, then that draft got lost, then it had another draft, and THAT got lost, and now I'm sick of it). But don't worry. This'll got up, eventually! :) Thanks so much!!!!!

Hi, good start. I wonder why she's out on the street? hmm. (An electronic staircase! Are Muggles so lazy that they can’t even walk up a flight of stairs?) haha, it takes too much energy to walk up the stairs =) I like it though, only wished it was longer, but that's just me, it's up to you to type as much or as little as you want. I think Sarah has a lot of sense for an eight year old, how long has she been on the street?

Author's Response: Thaks! I'm glad you liked that line. It came from a trip to Chicago, actually (well, this whole story did, really). I'll tell you how this story was born (though you probably don't care). We were in the subway station, and my brother, whose about Sarah's age, hung back to look at magazines. Well, this lady (who looks a lot like Hermione grown up, actually) goes up to him and asks him if he's lost and refused to let him leave until we went back up the escalator and said, look, we're his dad and sister. The whole thing was an inspiration. lol. So I hope you enjoyed that little rant! Thanks sooo much; I really appreciate it!

Good start! I liked that you made Hermione an Obliviator - if they really have to do what you made her do, she's the one for the job, since she's Muggleborn! Poor little Sarah. The Malfoys are really bad people. Who is her mother? Um, right, you probably can't tell... I'll have to read. Hermione is very kind to take her home. You seem to have a good story there. Update soon.

Since you left a nice review on our story we thought that we should leave a review on your story and we are sure glad that we found your story. All of your stories are quickly being added to our Fav.s! You are such a great author, its nice to read orginal Draco and Hermione stories and all of your stories sound like have very interseting plots and we are going to try to review on as many as we can!
Happy Writing
~Alayna & Danyel~

Author's Response: Thanks! But I will warn you (and I am not afraid to reveal this) DRACO AND HERMIONE ARE NOT GETTING TOGETHER IN THIS STORY!!!! lol. It's not going to happen. So...erm...sorry. Glad to get that off my chest! Anyways. I'm really glad that you liked it. (And BTW, I thought I'd let you know that your banner is almost done.)

Author's Response: I'm seriously trying. I know exactly what it supposed to happen in chapter 2, down to the food they're supposed to be eating, but it's been a combination of me being too busy and lazy to draft it. But now that I realize that I can not start a new novel (which I have a horrid NEED to do) until I update a few things, I'm getting this back into gear. So more is coming, I swear it....