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I thought WIC/medicaid kicks in immediately if you get pg, no matter your nationality? I remember you mentioning that if you got pregnant you all may not be able to afford the prenatal care...

Well we signed paperwork stating that other than Workers compensation and Unemployment benefits, we would not be able to take advantage of any federal or state programs. WIC is still up in the air since it's not really for us, it's for baby.

I think I'll go to my immigration site and see if I can get clarification. But I know for SURE we can't use food stamps, TANF... and there's one more. Any child we produce CAN use Medicare though I think.... I need to find out.. BLAH.

When you sign the Affidavit of Support, you accept legal responsibility for financially supporting the sponsored immigrant(s) until they become U.S. citizens or can be credited with 40 quarters of work. Any joint sponsors or household members whose income is used to meet the minimum income requirements are also legally responsible for financially supporting the sponsored immigrant. If the immigrant receives any "means-tested public benefits," you are responsible for repaying the cost of those benefits to the agency that provided them. If you do not repay the debt, the agency can sue you in court to get the money owed. When in doubt, ask the benefit provider whether the benefit is a "means-tested public benefit."

Currently, Federal means-tested public benefits include Food Stamps, Medicaid, Supplemental Security Income (SSI), Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF), and the State Child Health Insurance Program (CHIP). States and local jurisdictions may also designate certain of their programs as means-tested public benefits.

The following types of programs are not counted as means-tested public benefits: emergency Medicaid; short-term, non-cash emergency relief; services provided under the National School Lunch and Child Nutrition Acts; immunizations and testing and treatment for communicable diseases; student assistance under the Higher Education Act and the Public Health Service Act; certain forms of foster-care or adoption assistance under the Social Security Act; Head Start programs; means-tested programs under the Elementary and Secondary Education Act; and Job Training Partnership Act programs.

Some states WILL make exceptions for children and pregnant women if the need is there, but since I think DH made almost 50k last year... I doubt the "need" is there.

Nope, not even close. We had to go through immigration. We got married in Sept, filed in December, finger prints in feb, work permit in March, green card in april/may... then I wait 2 years... have to resubmit for my green card.. that one will last 10 years.

Then I make the choice, do I take citizenship, or do I just continue paying $600 every 10 years for a new green card. Well... if I don't take citizenship I can't vote... I will not live in a country I can't have a say in. If I don't take citizenship I'm considered a foreigner when it comes to inheritance and such. So if we buy a house, DH dies, it gets treated like an inheritance even if my name is on it too... which means I pay taxes on the value of the home. Same with cars, our bank accounts etc.

So the plan is to take citizenship in 2015 when I reach the 3 year mark. Not much changes. I will still be a Canadian citizen, with a Canadian passport, I just get to go get an American passport too. Dual Citizenship . Our kids are eligible for it as well... and I fully plan on taking advantage of that since it appears to cost less for College in Canada (never thought I'd say that.. cost me 18k for 2 years). It also means they can live where ever they want.

Someone gave me the link with the answer. As a Permanent Resident I cannot use any Means Tested Public Benefits unless I've been here 5 years. Once I take citizenship I can use them though. Since my Card is through marriage, I can apply for citizenship after 3 years rather than 5. So that's end of April 2015.

DH and I were arguing tonight over whether we are going to buy insurance this January or just pay the fine. I want to get insurance, he wants to pay the fine. Thinking I might go buy insurance he can go pay his dang fine.

I'm really sorry that all that stuff is so complicated. I had always thought that if you married someone with citizenship, you automatically got it, too. I'm so sorry that is not the case. What a headache.

Your kids will automatically have US citizenship if they are born here, though.

Thanks ladies. I do see the point behind it, Imagine the people who would be using these things if they were open to those with Green Cards? The debt would be insane!!!!! Then the gov't would really have reason to complain about it

And no, I've only been home once in 2 years. I was literally stuck here for the first year. If I had, I may not have been allowed back. I flew in on the 17th of April 2011, and received permission to travel sometime in May 2012. I went home in August... and I'm not sure when I will be able to go back again. I love going home, but it's expensive, and stressful (the airport is 90 miles away for example).

While I was going to attempt to visit DH during O this cycle, it doesn't look like it's going to happen. DH was told he may be moving to another job (with more hours) that weekend so it would be pointless for Reme and I go go down. He's going to find out for sure tomorrow. If he does, he's going to contact his ex to see if Reme can miss school next Monday (the 15th) and I will leave Friday and drive down to spend the weekend with DH and his grandpa. Nola will of course be coming with.. it's so nice not to worry about finding a place to take her. Just means I need to get her a harness and leash since I won't want to leave her alone in the basement the whole time... and I don't want her roaming free since people tend to not close outside doors quickly down there. She made her very first escape tonight out into our hallway... I'd hate to think what she would do if she got out into the real world!!!

I am surprisingly ok with likely not getting a shot this cycle. I'm usually a mess while on AF.. right now I'm feeling all empowered. LOL. This doctors appointment WILL be a turning point for us. I WILL get my thyroid regulated.

Though we are discussing ntnp... DH still thinks that we will be fine and will find a way to make things work out. If he's right, It's likely that June will be our ttc again cycle. That should give me 2 full months on a meds before I'd Ovulate in June. Will also give us a chance to get some further testing that I'd like to have done.. namely I want a full STD panel done. They only looked for certain ones last time, and we still don't have DH's results (and he called, they can't give them to him, or mail them out with a phone request.. so I have to wait until he's back home... so we'll just have them run again). This will help assure that there is nothing underlying going on. My tests will be run before his... I'm just not sure what we'll do if there is something underlying, since we wouldn't be able to be treated at the same time.. which means no visits! I don't like that idea

I'm really scared he's going to tell me I need to seen an endocrinologist. We just seriously cannot swing that right now. They are more thorough (more tests), require more appointments etc... I've only ever been seen by one, once.. at first diagnosis as a teen. I wasn't a complicated case.. they were able to get my levels down to a safe level with just meds ( didn't resolve all symptoms, but I didn't feel like dying anymore either) so they just kept up with that. One day I'd like better treatment, but right now just getting the levels DOWN are what's important to me.

I admit, I'm feeling a lot better. I'm really starting to wonder if the amount of red meat I consume while DH is home has something to do with how crappy I feel while he is here. I haven't eaten red meat in the house since he left a month ago (I have had take out burgers).. it's all been fish (which I can't cook when he's home) or chicken, little bit of pork. Less animal products in general too, since I can eat meals with out it while he can't. I might have to quit my job just to cook for us.

*And I realized I'm wrong, I made beef soup, but that still a significant reduction in my meat intake compared to if he was home*

I've also significantly increased my water in take, which is probably helping a lot too.

Thanks ladies!!! I'm less nervous than I was yesterday. I spent a few hours going through my medical records from 1999 forward, pulling out anything might be of importance. Sadly most of my loss data is not in these packets, but that's ok... multiple systems and multiple offices used often means incomplete records.

(loss discussion)

I did learn something about my TFMR (termination for medical reasons). When I lost the twins in 05, I didn't realize that between my two ultrasounds there was 0 growth. The only difference was there was HB's, but no actual change in any measurement other than the SCH I had that went from 1mm to 14mm. And when they did the one before surgery, there was only a few days growth... in more than 2 weeks. This sounds terrible... but it made me feel so much better about my decision even though they were never going to make it. Amazing how much guilt a person holds onto huh? 7.5 years of it!

(back to regularly scheduled programming).

I did find my test results from the PAP I had in November 2010 showing negative for STD's, and my one in March showing Negative.. but I would have been in the incubation period. I'm quite interested to see what the dr thinks. I trust my husband, and he trusts me... I either have the STD version of Jesus's conception.. or he had something and didn't know it. Lora mentioned that his ex from before her cheated... now we are wondering if DH had it for over 15 years and had no idea... he'd originally thought he had to take a test for his wedding, but Lora did mention that it was for a UTI (how we got on that discussion.. I will never know, but it was useful!). And it kind of adds up, Long term untreated STD's can cause Reiter's (that's probably spelled wrong) Disease/Syndrome... and Dh fits a LOT of the description. Now we just need to get him into a doctor who can maybe get him fixed. I'd like to see about getting him a good 2 week course of abx... just cause. I'm thinking he'd feel a lot better... and we might see some improvement in his skin.

Now I have good news Reme and I are going to see DH this weekend! He's switching jobs next week, and will be gone another month or so. So I'm going to pull Reme from School Friday and Monday (kid has been REALLY good with his attendance this year, and his teacher thinks that the time off to see his family isn't wasted time, just asked that I bring along a few books for him) and head down to see DH and the inlaws!! Nola's coming too It's a long drive, not sure if we are leaving Thursday night after I get off work (I work 5-9:30, don't get up until 3pm).. so I could be home by 9:45, get the car packed (including the cat), get starbucks (actually, I'd prolly get that on my way home, since it's in the Mall Parking lot), get to Reme's and be on the road by 10:30. Since I can get the pet crate from Lora in the evening this week, I could have it set up and ready to go with her box and bed.. just shove her in it and buckle her in the car. When time is of the essence, I can move pretty fast. LOL.

it's a 10hr drive down, so I'd get there about the time DH left for work, get to sleep a few hours, Reme could spend time with his great grandfather, then his dad and cousins. Nola will be in the basement... which sort of worries me cause it's cold and she's tiny... I got her a sweater (lol, it cost me a quarter, I'll put a pic at the end of the entry), but I think she might still be cold. So I'm going to toss her tiny carrier in the trunk of my car so I can take her places with me if I must. Then on Sunday DH has to move to another Town into a motel, so Reme and I will head up with him, and stay in the motel and head home Monday. It's going to be a whirlwind trip... but so worth it!. And... yes I'm naughty... if I O as early as I did last cycle (if I did at all) this cycle... we might still get a chance

Here's Nola Cat in her sweater. She freaked out... refused to put her feet on the floor... it was HILARIOUS!