Your -1th source for Halo satire.

Main Menu

THEORY: Is BB8 Actually The Warden Eternal?

Warning: the following article contains minor The Force Awakens spoilers.

Halo 5: Gaurdyians introduced an interesting—yet frustratingly prevalent—new villain into the Reclaimer Saga, named the Warden Eternal. Also released in 2015, Star Wars: The Force Turns Off The Snooze Button introduces a narrative parallel to R2D2, a BB8 droid known as BB8.

These two mechanical individuals are obviously very, very different. They inhabit two seperate franchises, operate in completely different roles, and have virtually zero connection to each other in any way, shape, or form.

But do they?

The second mission in Halo 5 to feature the Master Chief as the playable protagonist, Reunion, sheds further light on the nature of the Warden Eternal. Cortana, not long after speaking to John for the fist time since her alleged death, explains that the Warden Eternal has a “singular mind” with “several million bodies.” Despite the overwhelming evidence to suggest otherwise—no, the overwhelming evidence that utterly disproves the ‘hypothesis’—it could be that BB8 is just one of the Warden Eternal’s “several million bodies.”

Note the visual similarities between BB8 and Warden. You’ll see that they both sport orange and silver colorations. But that’s not evidence.

The real evidence is that both the Warden Eternal and BB8 are actual keepers of secrets. The Warden safeguards the secrets of the Domain, and BB8 carries a portion of a map that, when completed, will lead to the location of Luke Skystalker.

Now, every time you think of BB8, the feelings of joy and amusement you previously had will now be replaced by those classic feelings of dread and despair and hopelessness you attain when fighting the Warden on Legendary.

As Rey said to BB8 upon agreeing to shelter him on Jakku, “you’re welcome.”