16:42, Day Zero. Subject Evergreen successfully transported to Site Kenneth and released. Surveillance shows a tall, slender man in a tweed coat waking up under a pine tree. He is badly mislocated. He remembers getting into a cab after taping his appearance on Book Talk, but nothing after that. He discovers he is naked from the waist.

Subject is male caucasian, age 45, no known allergies or pre-existing conditions, 89th percentile on Revised F Scale. Major factor for selection was variable 1213 (Prose Style). Subject has written: "The word is the only proper register of beauty, without which human experience becomes a meaningless jumble of fleeting intensities, which is to say, television."

Subject finds shorts and trousers draped neatly over a nearby juniper, but in process of retrieving them experiences rapid onset of Side Effect A. Is able to achieve appropriate squatting posture before symptoms run their course. Spends next ten minutes looking for large, dry leaves.