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Cabbie: 'Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time.
Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.'

Passenger: 'There are always a few clouds over everybody.'

Cabbie: Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis.
He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star
and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.

Passenger: Sounds like he was something really special.

Cabbie: 'There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday.
He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything.
Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, could do everything right.'

Passenger: 'Wow, some guy then.

Cabbie: 'He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams.
Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake,
and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer
her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes
highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever
measure up to Frank Feldman.

Passenger: An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?

Cabbie: 'Well ..... I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his Wife!!"

After being married for thirty years, a wife asked her husband to describe her.
He looked at her for a while...then said, "You're A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K."
She asks..... "What does that mean?"
He said, "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous, Hot.
She smiled happily and said.. "Oh, that's so lovely.. What about I, J, K?"
He said, "I'm Just Kidding!"

Oldie but a ...

A heart surgeon picks up his BMW motorcyle from the shop. As he's paying the bill, the mechanic steps up and says,

"Ya know doc, we're alot alike"", the surgeoan says, "How so?"

The mechanic says, "Well I take your bike, open up the engine, figure out whats wrong, meticulously replace all the parts, put it back together and close it all up, and make it better than it was when it came in, just like yuo do with your heart patients. So how come you make millions of dollars and I only a few thousand?"

A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico .

While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.
He asked the waiter, 'What is that you just served?'

The waiter replied, 'Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are called Cojones de Toro, bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy!'
The cowboy said, 'What the heck, bring me an order..'

The waiter replied, 'I am so sorry, senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy.'

The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, 'These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.'

Would you laugh at a funeral????

CARDIOLOGIST'S FUNERAL

A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital where he had worked for most of his life. A huge heart, covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners just burst into laughter. When all eyes stared at him, he said, "I'm so sorry... I was just thinking of my own funeralÔÇª I'm a gynecologist."