Michael Boyd Clark, MichaelClark.name

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Archive of entries posted on July 1998

10. Sometimes stays in bed till after 6am. 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women without bonnets. 8. Shows up at barn raisings in full “Kiss” makeup. 7. When you criticize him, he yells, “Thou suck!” 6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by “Jeb Daddy.” 5. Defiantly says, “If I …

For the engineers among us who understand that the obvious is not always the solution, and that the facts, no matter how implausible, are still the facts … A complaint was received by the Pontiac Division of General Motors: “This is the second time I have written you, and I don’t blame you for not …

“Do you believe in life after death?” the boss asked one of his employees. “Yes, sir,” the clerk replied. “That’s good,” the boss said. “After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she stopped in to see you.” Date: Thu, 2 Jul 1998 13:42:35 -0500

A farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the old open cockpit airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost. “$10 for 3 minutes,” replied the pilot. “That’s too much,” said the farmer. The pilot thought for a second and then said, “I’ll make you a …

A blonde is visiting Washington, DC. This is her first time to the city, so she wants to see the Capitol building. Unfortunately, she can’t find it, so she asks a police officer for directions. “Excuse me, officer,” the blonde says, “how do I get to the Capitol building?” The officer says, “Wait here at …

So there’s this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. “Yoo Hoo!” she shouts. “How can I get to the other side?” The second blonde looks up the river then down and shouts back, “You are on the other side.” Date: Thu, 2 Jul …