About Me

I love life, love to laugh and love my family. I strive to find humor in most situations (except when driving behind idiots.) I may not have the cleanest house or the cleanest mouth, but I try hard to enjoy life to the fullest every day.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Remember when I mentioned that Master J had taken over my newly empty kitchen with his army men? I asked him to clean them up and he did. They are no longer spread out across my kitchen. No, now they are spread out across my whole house. But they are not blatantly obvious. Because they are strategically placed in innocuous corners. Protecting the borders if you will. There are two to four army men in each doorway, peeking out from under couches and generally lurking about the place.

For example, here we have several men flanking either side of Master J's bedroom door. You can see he's brought out the heavy artillery in the form of the tank on the east side. Evidently he feels the need for extra security.

Here we see the men doing their daily patrol. It's probably somewhat unusual to have a man on the hood but I guess he's what you would call the "point man". Sucky job he has, sitting on a hot truck hood totally unprotected and guaranteed first in the line of fire. He's a brave soldier that one.

Here we have a tense and dramatic scene being portrayed by two of our fine young men. I think it goes a little something like this:

Soldier1: Help me!Soldier2: I'm trying man! I don't know how much longer I can hold up this beat up kitchen cabinet while keeping my weapon trained on the unseen enemy!Soldier1: I'm tangled up in this web of filth! Soldier2: I've only got two hands soldier! You've got to help yourself! Are you telling me you can't escape from a dustbunny?Soldier1: Can't. go on. much. longer. Being. strangled. by. Mirth hair!Soldier2: Good lord I had no idea it was Mirth hair! You're doomed soldier! Soldier1: Gack!Soldier2: Sigh. He was a good soldier. He never had a chance. What a waste. I'd take his body back to base if my arms weren't so numb.

I think I have too much time on my hands. I need to find a house buyer to keep me occupied.