Advice to Empaths

Do you ever come home from being “out” somewhere, whether it be work, shopping or with family and friends and feel totally emotionally drained and exhausted. Maybe even sad, angry or down even though you KNOW you have nothing to be sad, angry or down about?

Chances are you’ve “helped” someone today!

Look back over your day. Think back to who you spent time with.

The job of an Empath is to ease the burden of sadnes, pain and anger that other people carry! Empaths are like the sponges that clean our dirty kitchen sinks and benches. Sponges need to be wrung out under clean running water to clean them again. And just like the sponge, Empath’s can cleanse themselves just by talking about what they’ve absorbed during the day. Often, Empaths, feel terribly sad and/or angry or depressed or frustrated at the end of the day. However, when you come home and realise that you feel this way, stop and question who it was that you “helped” during the day. It will be a sure thing to say that you have absorbed their emotions so that they no longer have to carry them.

They’ve walked away from you thinking how “wonderful and what a great listener you are”, yet you now wish you hadn’t run into them! Sound familiar? So, what to do?

By looking hard at your day, you can see that these emotions do not belong to you. They need to be wrung out under the running water just like the sponge. I hope this makes sense?

An Empath feels everyone’s pain, anger and sadness. We try to help everyone. Sometimes we say “yes” when we mean “no” and “no” when we mean “yes”. This is something we need to be aware of, practice and learn.

If someone asks you to do something for them and you immediately say “yes” but you really want to say “no”, teach try saying “Let me think about it” or “Let me get back to you, I’ve got something else on my mind at the moment”. Then when you do get back to them, they actually have accomplished the “whatever task” themselves and they don’t actually need you. This will help you build up the confidence so that one day you can say “yes” when you mean “yes” and “no” when you mean “no”.

Sometimes too….we can actually “interfere” in other Soul’s journeys and prevent them from learning lessons by getting our “yes’s” and our “no’s” wrong! So, just be aware of that too as it may lead us to taking on unnecessary baggage.

Did you know that about 15-20% of the population is considered highly sensitive? It’s such a significant part of the population that it cannot be considered a condition, and the numbers are not large enough to make it common, so it’s not quite understood.

Many people look at being sensitive as a defect or a hindrance because it does not fit into societal norms of how one should act in public. On the contrary, sensitive people are more aware, more compassionate, more forgiving and often more driven.

Sensitive people believe things can be better and work hard to make it so. It is hard for a sensitive person to see suffering without trying to relieve the pain, to see heartache without expressing love and to see a challenge without problem solving. The empathetic nature of a sensitive person is often invisible to most, and as such, is often ignored or misunderstood.

Sensitive people are often so giving of their time and energy that they forget to care for themselves. An innate quality can be difficult to navigate with outside influences establishing the expectations of how you should act.

If you feel like this might be you, here are 5 important lessons for sensitive people:

1. Embrace and control your emotional responses

Sensitive people see the world differently and with that vision comes great power and responsibility. Because we feel what others are feeling, we often feel a moral obligation to help, and we react with bigger emotion and more rapid action. On the surface, this appears to be a good thing, an admirable trait. There are many challenges with reacting to a situation in the heat of heightened emotion. The other person might not want help, we might not be able to provide the right kind of help or we might offer help that ends up doing more harm than good to them and us.

It is not about the desire to help; it is about understanding the true nature of any situation outside of the emotional connection that is felt. Take the time to think both logically and emotionally before jumping into action. Know the whole world cannot be saved no matter how hard we try. The responsibility comes in choosing our reactions wisely.

2. Listen and trust your inner guide to protect yourself

Sensitive people have a strong intuition that comes from a heightened awareness of what is happening around us. Unfortunately, though, we do not always pay attention to what our gut is telling us. Because of our highly sensitive nature, we tend to be more trusting and more willing to take people at their word. There are people that will take advantage of that, and that is why listening to our inner guide is so important.

It is this inner source of wisdom that protects us and warns us to tread carefully. As sensitive people, we are so focused on helping that we often ignore the warning signs our inner guide provides. Pay attention to your gut as closely as you pay attention to your desire to help others. Doing so will help you help yourself which better positions you to help others.

3. Stay focused on the things that really matter

Because we are so aware and absorb so much of the energy that surrounds us, it is easy to lose our focus and take on other people’s problems as if they are our own. It is important that we stay focused on the things that matter in our lives first and avoid over-committing ourselves to the point of being overwhelmed.

We are quick to say yes but upon contemplation might realize we are not be the best person for the task. This can lead to over-complicating and overthinking a situation to the point that it becomes detrimental to our responsibilities. The lesson here is to keep our priorities first, help when it makes sense and find other resources when necessary.

4. Being sensitive is not the same as being weak

People who are not as sensitive as we are may interpret our ability to empathize and feel as a weakness. The truth is, it takes great inner strength to feel the constant joy, sadness and even heartache of those around us. This is not a burden we choose to carry but a gift with which we were entrusted.

The key to using our gift with purpose, and in service to others, is to rely on that inner strength. That strength helps us to stay strong and keep from internalizing the energy that is so easy for us to absorb. It gives us the fortitude to use the energy we encounter and repurpose it back into the universe with grace and positivity.

5. Be courageous and continue to live from your authentic truth

The biggest lesson for sensitive people is to not let others, who might not understand our gift, change us. It is often easier to hide our sensitive side than to be judged by it. Continue to live your truth and be proud of your sensitive nature. It is who we are, and the Universe needs us to share it. Doing so will create a more loving, kind and peaceful world.

Always remember being sensitive is a gift and even the greatest gifts can be a burden at times. Remember these lessons to keep yourself grounded in your true nature while honouring yourself and those your gift serves.