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Almost catching up now. That first word is the most important.

This is the sight that looked up at me after I'd given in to my primal lusts.

This is the reason I have such problems slimming.

This evil little beast is Marks and Spencers Italian Style Coffee Milk. I love it! It's the nicest drink in the world, better even than Baileys. Just lovely. Can you see how it's an empty bottle? That's 'coz I' just went and gone and drunk it. I went and gone and drunk the whole dang fing.

The only catch is that it's 10 points per bottle. 10 weight watchers points, per bottle! That's a meal. And a dessert. In one! 10 points... I get 30 per day.

To put it into perspective: meatballs, two slices of toast and a bottle of beer all together would be exactly 10 points. So as you can imagine it was a tough call when I was eyeing up this little treat at the train station on the weekend:

"Woo that's a lot of points Nicholarse, you're slimming you can't really have things like that, skip a meal. Sorry, I mean, you can't really have that. Skip a meal. Oops, there I go again. Sorry. Skip a f#cking meal!"

So I did, I skipped a meal and gorged on this baby. Here's the bit where most people usually go ", oh, and I regretted it afterwards," but balls to that! I loved every second of it. And I'd do exactly the same thing again. Seriously, it's nicer than Baileys! If you want to be big and fat like me go and buy some next time you're at Marks and Spencers and guzzle away. Your tastebuds will thank you. It'll serve you right for gloating as well*.

NM

*You were. You're sitting there going, "pah, no wonder he's so fat, serves him right, fatso!". You wait 'til you've had some of that stuff. It's like heroin. I imagine. Only don't inject it. Or smoke it. Drink it. The milk thing, not heroin. Heroin is bad. Drugs are bad. So is that milk thing. Help me.

In short he's a TV presenter and an award winning radio presenter.
In long, he's worked on LBC, Kerrang Radio, Hallam FM and The Bay. And other places, for a bit.
The TV show he presented was called "Esoteria" and ran for two series on Controversial TV (Sky channel 200).
Currently he is, as they say in radio, between jobs.