Thursday, August 14, 2008

Cocina MEXICAN WEDDING COOKIES para tu Amor Ahora!

Hola putas. After a long and serious discussion last night, Kira and I decided to share cooking secrets extracted from the remote desert of Mexico in the highest ziggurat known to man. I must warn you, once you read this recipe, I will have to hunt you down and knife you... but know that you will probably have enough time to make a batch of these mouth-watering treasures and bask in their daintiness before you join the lord Jesus.

Ingredients:

1 lb soft unsalted butter

1 C powdered sugar

2 T vanilla

1 tsp salt

2 C finely chopped pecans

5 C sifted flour

powdered sugar for dusting

Latin pop music for inspiration (Ricky Martin does NOT count)

1) First place your MP3 player, CD, cassette tape or eight-track into a music dispensing device and press play (or jugar)

2) Preheat oven to 350 degrados Fahrenhitos

3) Beat butter and powdered sugar with mixer until light and fluffy and peaks form (about 10-15 min)

4) Add vanilla, salt, and pecans

5) Remove from mixer and stir in flour by hand. Be careful not to over-mix, fools!

6) Form into futbol Americano shapes (or blobs) the size of walnuts and place on a buttered cookie sheet

7) Bake 10-12 minutes or until just beginning to get the slightest bit of coloration on bottoms.

8) Remove upon first sight of coloration and set on cooling rack

9) When cool enough to touch, place in bowl with powdered sugar on top and toss gently

10) Once cooled, place in a box made solely of Mayan gold and cover until ready to serve

When I don't follow the recipe exactly, I find my cookies taste like rotting corpse. These are very temperamental cookies so the slightest mistake will be horrific. If you mess them up, perhaps you don't deserve to eat cookies.