Is your partner’s drinking hurting your relationship? Perhaps you used to have fun together and enjoy an occasional drink, but now it seems that he consumes far more than you’re comfortable with.

Have you ever asked what you can do to help your husband stop drinking? Maybe he’s promised to stay sober in the past, but you know that didn’t go quite as well as you’d hoped. You might suspect that your husband is now hiding his alcohol consumption, which makes you even more concerned that his habit is getting worse. Deep down, you fear you just can’t trust him.

Maybe it’s an issue with binge drinking. Do you feel that your partner doesn’t have an “off” switch—that he will just keep drinking as long as alcohol is available?

It may be that your husband has done something truly alarming or destructive while under the influence. For example, perhaps he’s made a scene at a party, drained a bank account or even crashed the car. Or, maybe he’s had more frightening private outbursts, lashing out at you or the family in cruel and confusing ways.

It may seem like the caring, dependable person you married has been lost to alcohol. Now, it’s on you to keep it all together—your family, your home, your relationship—while the ground keeps shifting in frightening fashion beneath your feet.

Are you tired of managing the cycles of chaos or stupidity on your own? Do you wish you could free your relationship from the damage caused by drinking and reclaim the connection, trust and fun you once shared?

Drunken Behavior In Relationships Is Painful And Common

You are not alone. Alcohol dependence is extremely common all around the world—and especially here in Australia. In fact, it’s so common that people even joke about it, repeating this well-known line “I’m not alcoholic. I’m Australian.” Or “I just love beer.”

‘Jokes’ like these can make it difficult to distinguish “normal drinking” from dependency. But, as you no doubt know, alcohol abuse isn’t a laughing matter. According to a NSW Health report from 2017, “30% of adults drink at levels that increase their long-term risk of harm.”

This statistic only reflects medical harm, not the profound damage drinking can do to relationships, families or careers. Alcohol often causes, or at least fuels, intense, chaotic incidents and dynamics. For some of us, there’s nothing a little bit of liquor can’t make worse.

The truth is that, often, excessive consumption is the symptom, not the problem. Modern life is stressful and generally not quite as rewarding as some of us may wish. Drinking can seem like a tempting route to short-term relief from all the restlessness and discontent.

As the partner of someone struggling with a drink dependency, you likely know that it causes more distress than it soothes. You have likely also found it impossible to effectively communicate your fear, pain and frustration to your partner without the conversation turning into a fight.

Thankfully, with expert guidance in a safe environment, you can talk with your husband about his drink dependency and recovery. You can carve out a path toward mutual understanding, restored trust and lasting connection. You can get back onto stable ground together.

Dependency Treatment Can Help You Address This Problem At The Root

Even if you have a very good reason to suspect that your husband drinks too much, expressing your concerns likely exposes you to his anger or defensiveness. Working with me, you don’t have to feel like you’re “crazy” or “a nag,” or whatever else you may have been called as you do your best to keep your family above water. And, my presence makes it much less likely that one of you will erupt and storm out of the room in a fury. You deserve a chance to feel heard and understood.

As your counselor, I combine both alcohol dependency counselling and couples counselling. The overall goal is to provide you both with the support you need to reconnect and move forward. I am here to help each of you give voice to your fears and frustrations, guiding you toward shared understanding and solutions.

That means we have to directly acknowledge and address the problem at hand: Your husband drinks too much. To that end, I’ll encourage you to express all the ways alcohol is wreaking havoc in your relationship. I’ll help you develop the tools required to get your needs met without triggering your spouse’s shame or anger. That way, your husband can begin to take real responsibility for the current chaos and conflict in your relationship. He can become accountable, and you can both begin to have the conversations you so desperately need.

Couples counselling for drinking involves helping your husband find the best possible path forward. Because you will be involved in sessions, you can rest assured that your spouse is actually participating in treatment. You get to ensure that the full story is being told, even if it’s painful or shaming. Most importantly, you and your partner can both work to understand the core issue beneath the dependency and begin to carve out a path to recovery.

We Are Only As Sick As Our Secrets

Chances are, your husband has been struggling with a secret pain he’s kept buried for too long. Maybe he doesn’t know it’s there, or maybe he just doesn’t know how to put it into words. For example, he may drink to mask a deep-rooted feeling that life just isn’t going as it should do. Or, he may be attempting to numb anxiety or to create excitement in a life that seems drab and dull, especially when compared to the dreams he once had. It’s also entirely possible that he just can’t figure out how to stop drinking.

Whatever the case may be, treatment can give your husband the ability to cope with challenges without relying on the bottle. And, together, you and your husband can tear down the walls between you, then use those bricks to build a bridge.

On a personal and professional level, I understand what it’s like to have alcohol consume your life. And, from 30 years of experience working on these issues in my own life and in the lives of my clients, I also know that change is possible. With help, you can restore your relationship and reclaim the love you once had together.

You may have concerns about behavioral couples therapy for substance abuse…

If I call you, will I be betraying my partner?

By reaching out for help, you are not causing a problem—you are acknowledging a problem that is already there. Alcohol dependence is something what will not get better on its own. It is progressive in nature and tends to accelerate. In a way, it’s like you’re stuck in an elevator hurtling down. It’s up to the two of you to decide where you want to get off and begin a journey back to sanity, one step at a time. That’s not betrayal—that’s support and care.

Is counselling confidential?

Yes. Treatment is 100% confidential. Because I don’t take Medicare or private health insurance, no diagnosis goes on any record. This means that no one has to know about this counselling except for you and your partner. Your privacy really matters to me.

We’ve already tried everything. How is your approach to his dependency any different?

Too many people try to address a drink dependence by simply eliminating alcohol. But, getting through “Dry July’” doesn’t prove anything or fix anything in the long-term. You can’t help your spouse stop drinking until you know why he is drinking. Then, you can both start to really know one another again and repair your bond in the process.

Without being overly harsh about it, let me just say that your average dependent is going to have a whole host of reasons why they don’t have a problem. Denial is a very powerful force in your husband’s life right now. At the most basic level, he really likes drinking, and he probably isn’t thinking about quitting unless something truly terrible has occurred.

I can help you communicate that something terrible is occurring—his behaviour is eroding your relationship. You do not have to wait until his dependency sets fire to you and your family.

You Deserve To Feel Heard And Understood

If you’d like to learn more about alcohol dependence treatment and marriage counselling, please contact me for a free, 10-minute consultation. If you have any other questions, I encourage you to take a look at the FAQ page.

My practice is based in Bondi Beach in Sydney’s Eastern Suburbs, 2026.

*I am speaking directly to the female partner here because, 9.9 times out of 10, the female partner is the one who reaches out to me for counselling. However, if you are a man struggling to understand your partner’s drinking, this page is also meant for you! I am equally well acquainted on the particular issues faced by male partners, and I am here to help.

Testimonials

Michael Myerscough

I do not have high enough praise for Michael's work. His integrity, clarity and insight allowed my husband and I to laser cut through our years of unfinished conversations and misunderstandings in a matter of months...to the point where we now have the tools to consistently go through "Door B" as Michael would say.....to do it differently.
Our marriage had a lot of love and was a "good" relationship, but there were areas where we both ...

I do not have high enough praise for Michael's work. His integrity, clarity and insight allowed my husband and I to laser cut through our years of unfinished conversations and misunderstandings in a matter of months...to the point where we now have the tools to consistently go through "Door B" as Michael would say.....to do it differently.
Our marriage had a lot of love and was a "good" relationship, but there were areas where we both ...

Brenda

Michael Myerscough

Before my wife and I met and started working with Michael, my marriage was over. My wife had "left the building" and only agreed to couples therapy as a means of a smoother exit to our relationship. Michael explained to her that a smooth exit was not out of the question, but a hard look at how we had gotten to such a place was where to start.
With amazing objectivity, he took us through our ...

Steven

Michael Myerscough

Kate and I would like to thank you for the work you have done with us. Our transformation using your strategies and meeting with you have been nothing short of life changing. Many thanks again Michael

Warren

Michael Myerscough

One year ago my world came crashing down when I found out that my amazing, seemingly perfect husband had been seeing prostitutes for 9 months. I am a mum with three small boys. I didn't know what to do or how to function. All I knew is that I had to hold it together for my children.
After seeing several marriage counsellors who were unable to help, my husband and I found Michael. He listened, ...

Karina and John

Michael Myerscough

Michael is a truly great marriage counsellor.
He sized up my marriage faster than any therapist we've seen before (and we've seen a few), and we made more progress in 3 months with him than I thought possible. I understand where my wife is coming from more than ever before which is amazing.
I no longer feel our marriage is at deaths door. I would highly recommend him to any couple who is struggling.

Martin

Michael Myerscough

Michael saved both my marriage and myself. I had a crush on another woman which was splitting our marriage. Within two sessions, I realised that firstly I was suffering from depression and two that my crush on this other woman was my way of escaping the bleakness. This was helpful because I was able to let go of the crush and return emotionally to my wife.
My wife is probably even happier with Michael than I ...

Graeme

Michael Myerscough

Michael knows exactly how to get a couple out of trouble and is fearless.
Before working with Michael I was very sceptical about therapy for couples and did not believe that any outsider could fully understand me, my partner or our situation well enough to be of help. At best, I expected clichés and a quick fix that would wear out after a short time. Michael is different and not at all what I had imagined in ...

Chris

Michael Myerscough

Wow, I never thought I could get someone to get through to my husband and allow him to see himself in true REALITY! Michael Myerscough has been an absolute life changer for my marriage and it is evident that his approach to marriage therapy is a success story in itself.
My husband has a drinking problem which has been an issue in our marriage since the beginning. I and my children have witnessed his on and ...

Jasmine

Michael Myerscough

We first visited Michael because we weren’t sure that our marriage was still worth the effort. We’d already tried counselling and had got nowhere but Michael was different!
He immediately identified our underlying problems. He often says things we don’t want to hear but balances his insights with humour and compassion.
Michael has saved our marriage and has helped us as individuals in the process – we’re happier than we've ever been!

Ashley and Luke

Michael Myerscough

We stumbled across Michael’s site during a time of absolute marriage hell and upheaval. I thought my marriage was over. My husband turned around one morning out of the blue and said he was done with our 14 year marriage and he was attracted to someone else. I was completely blindsided and was at an utter loss. My whole world was destroyed in an instant.
I convinced him ...

Emma and Mario

Michael Myerscough

Michael Myerscough surprised us when we discovered he was a "Marriage Coach" as my wife, Brenda had been telling me of a book she was browsing. "The New Rules of Marriage" written by Michael’s mentor.
Within the first three sessions, I found that the "mechanical" process of "accountability" allowed me to 'ask' for what I need in the relationship and to be willing to hear the requests of my partner; the love of my life.
Michael provided ...

David

Michael Myerscough

Michael I really appreciate you following up.
I do know you tried very hard and I appreciate that so much. The fact you couldn't save my marriage is sad but as you said sometimes people aren't meant to be together.
My brain tells me that I will get through this, but at the moment my heart is telling me otherwise.
I am determined to have a good and better life and I will work very hard ...

Lynsey

Michael Myerscough

Your teachings has opened up a whole new world for me. I am able to better understand the emotional requirements required, firstly to be genuinely happy with ourselves, and secondly to try to understand and be happy with my wife.
If I were to advise anyone who found themselves in the unfortunate position that I was last year and I had to sum up my learning with you it would be; find someone who's advice you can trust ...

Sean

Michael Myerscough

When I contacted Michael regarding therapy it was with the explicit intent that he help us end our marriage in an amicable and conscious way for the sake of our children. This was our 3rd attempt at couples counselling and I was not interested in the least in "saving my marriage." I realise that if you're reading this you may be thinking "no one understands how bad your marriage is or could possibly have the ...

Maureen

Michael Myerscough

Thank you Michael.
Yesterday's intensive was amazing, I really thought I was the only issue and it's been spiralling me down deeper and deeper into this depression. It was at a point where I was questioning my love for Claire as I felt like I was lost.
I am very happy just from yesterday's outcome. Thankyou for showing us a way forward and through the mess I got us into. I look forward to future meetings ...

Tony

Michael Myerscough

My husband and I have been married for over 30 years and most of those years were spent raising our 6 children and striving to achieve goals that we had set for ourselves. Imagine my dismay when we had accomplished almost everything we had dreamed about and we were a light year away from happy. Our many homes, cars, vacations and travels did little to cover up the fact that we had grown ...

Mary

Michael Myerscough

In my 1st session with Michael I realized that Michael "got me" like no other professional ever has. Michael pin pointed issues that I have had for more than 50 years that have held me back. He has helped me to improve my life and save our marriage. Even better the work we did was respectful and a lot more entertaining that I would ever have thought possible.

Bob

Michael Myerscough

My wife found out about an 8 year emotional affair I'd been having. Somehow I'd convinced myself that it wasn't a big deal and that I wouldn't get caught. Well, I got caught and it was a huge deal. It was horrific. At points I was afraid that I'd either killed my wife or she was going to kill me. I had no idea this was going to cause such a big rupture or how ...

Gordon and Jenny

Michael Myerscough

We met Michael, at a point where our marriage was at rock bottom and I was really struggling with how it was going. I wanted out, but something kept me wanting to make it work. We had seen marriage counsellors, before, but Michael, was different. He has a great knack of getting to the root of the issue, using humor and a lot of sensitivity; he understands your boundaries and knows when to cross them. ...

Phillipa and Roger

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