In high school, I always had a lot of friends. I had a large group of “best friends” and then some other friends in other groups of people. When I got to college, everything changed. I realized, especially with my illness, that a lot of people in my life were not there for the right reasons and did not treat me right. My old best friend told me it was because I had “too high expectations for friends.” I did not really know what that meant until this year when I started living with my current roommate.

Just so everyone is aware, my roommate has no idea this blog exists, so she can not read this. Her and I became friends my sophomore because she started living with one of my good friends. We instantly became close friends and I thought she was the best friend that I always needed. We started living together in August and I had a lot of expectations. I was so excited to hang out in our room, go out together, study together, etc. When we came to school though, she slept at her boyfriends every night, only came home to take naps, and then went out with her boyfriend at night. I never saw her, never talked to her, never hung out with her. I had to drop my expectations drastically and after we had a long talk, I decided not to hold a grudge at get over it.

On my 21st birthday weekend, she threw me a surprise party and I was very surprised that she went out of the way to do that for me. The night of the party though, she did not hang out with me at all. And of course she slept at her boyfriends that night, so I did not see her until later that day. That night, my friends and I wanted to go out and she was planning on coming with us. She said she was going to go her boyfriends first and meet us downtown. Even though I was annoyed, I tried to forget about it. When we both got downtown, she sat at the bar, with her boyfriend, the whole time. I was so hurt and angry that I did not even want to be at the bar anymore.

The next day we got into a large argument. Well actually, she got mad at me for being mad at her and was basically yelling at me for an hour as I was trying to defend myself. She told me that her boyfriend is her first priority, above family, friends, school, etc. She also told me I should not “consider her a best friend anymore” because I expect too much. Did I really though? All I really wanted was for her to be a friend. She also told me that her boyfriend is her first priority, above family, friends, school, etc. So that is what I did.

Recently though, I have tried to make more of an effort to be her friends. I call her when I need to discuss an issue or text her when I could not sleep. She never answers my phone calls, never answers my texts, and is never there to talk to me in the room. So now it is difficult for me to consider her even a friend. I have been distancing myself from her because it is the only way I know how to not get hurt. It is just sad how we used to be so close, and now we are just roommates.

Yes, I know apples and broccoli are healthy, but not these alone. I used to just eat these-an apple for breakfast, broccoli for lunch and dinner. Not to mention the hundreds of calories I was burning at the gym. This belief I had that only fruits and vegetables were healthy was at the peak of my disordered eating. A couple of months into my recovery, my hair started falling out in large clumps. I have a lot of hair and it always a lot it always fell out, but never like this. At first I thought it was the medicine I was taking for my tumor. The doctors though told me that was not a side effect though. He asked me about my protein intake and I told him I ate chicken and boca burgers regularly. He recommend that I started taking a protein shake in the morning for my hair loss because that is a big sign of a protein deficiency. I could not believe I let myself get to that point.

After taking 25g soy protein shakes every morning, my hair started to look and feel better. Now I make sure I watch my protein intake carefully. Did you know you are supposed to eat half your body weight in grams of protein a day? If you work out, you need even more!!

When I started researching becoming a vegan, I realized how important protein, whole grains, and healthy fats are for you. I started incorporating brown rice, tofu, nuts, and avocados into my diet. I started to feel so much better and had SO much more energy. I also realized that sugar was ok too. I try to stick to natural sugar, like brown rice syrup, agave, molasses, or stevia.

My Dad always says, “Everything in moderation.” Seriously, he does, and I tell him I am going to put that on his gravestone. He is so incredibly right through, and he is so good at it too. My dad runs 13 miles a day, eats healthy during the week and goes a little crazy on the weekends. He helped me so much during my recovery and really respect his way of looking at food!

So, what is healthy eating exactly? It is having everything in moderation! Whole grains, protein, fruits, veggies, healthy fats, and an occasional treat or too!

Tonight my actual dinner recipe includes:

Roasted sweet potatoes, kale, onions, and brussel sprouts! I am also going to cook up so tofu to throw in for protein of course 🙂

As I am sitting here watching The Bachelor with my mom, I can’t help but think about my current boy situation. And when I say current, I mean the past 3 years. In high school, I dated a boy who I will call Joe. Joe and I dated on and off my freshman to the end of my junior year. Every 2 months he would break up with me, hook up with another girl, then want me back. Because I was a “in love” with him, I always too him back. Finally, my summer going into my senior year, I met my next boyfriend, Will. He was a year younger than me but I knew I was in love with him. We broke up before I went to college because we both knew it would not work.

When I got to college, Joe and I started dating again because he went to the private college right next to mine. When I became sick, he decided to cheat on me instead of be with me. We ended up breaking up ( I finally learned some lessons) and have not talked since. My sophomore year I met Phil. I am not sure if it was because I was finally completely recovered from any illness and disordered eating, but I was not ready for a boyfriend. I never wanted to hang out, go on dates, sleepover, etc. He was so kind and understanding, but I broke up with him over the summer and drove him completely away.

My first semester of my Junior year, I was set on not having a boyfriend. I did not have time, I did not want to be tied down, I just wanted to have fun etc. I went on several dates, but it just left me lonely in the end. Now that I have friends that are talking about getting engaged (yikes) and living with their boyfriends, I wonder if I should have a boyfriend. Is there something wrong with me? Should I WANT to have a boyfriend?

I know I do not need a boyfriend. I know I am independent and do NOT need a man to make me happy. I just hope that when the right one comes around, I think I will be ready. 🙂

Is everyone watching The Bachelor? I read on spoilers before the season even started that one particular woman is going to win. Now all the sites are saying someone different! I am so confused now! I really hope he picks Emily though!

This is a picture of Jupiter Beach, Florida, where my condo used to be.

I am currently at the public library working on the tons and tons of homework assignment my teachers decided to assign me. Being a special education major is tough work! Not only am I teach two days a week, I have class from 9am-5pm the other two days where I get assigned projects galore!

Today I had a quick check up at the doctor and then just so happened to drive past Sunset Foods.

Has anyone ever been here?

Honestly, I was not super impressed. I was hoping it would have been more like a Whole Foods, but it was more like a Jewel trying to be Whole Foods by offering some vegan options but still having normal groceries. They did have a nice selection of fresh sushi though 🙂

I picked up these….

Yes, some large lima beans that I wanted to try in a recipe I found on ohsheglows.com. I will let you know how it turns out!

So my recipe today?

I threw in a little bit of everything. Exercising, spending time with my dad, shopping, cookie, homework, and bachelor! Stir these all together for a great Monday!

Take the lazy college student and lazy high school and mix them together. Add the crankiness gradually. Stir well. Bake in oven for 350 degrees or until we got to the mall with our dad. After shopping at the mall and helping sister pick out skirt, sprinkle delicious Red Robin burgers and fries on top. Serves 3!

I was planning on working out today. That did not happen! Oh well, I was happy to be working on my blog all day. I just ate some delicious vegan ravioli watching America’s Next Great Restaurant. I am glad that some of the contestants are trying to make more healthier options. Makes me happy 🙂

Hello and welcome to my new blog! I am a college student trying to juggle my first semester of student teaching, being a vegan, sorority priorities, friendships, working out, having no money, spending time with my friends, and keeping up my grades! I have been vegan since August 2010, but with having a chef living in a sorority house, it is very difficult. I buy all my own food and basically live out of a microwave and styrofoam bowls.

Before you start making assumptions, I am not your typical sorority goal. I joined to make new friends in college because several of my high school classmates attend the same college I do. I do like to go out every once and a while, but school work comes first. I am on the executive board for the Panhellenic Association, which is basically in charge of all the sorority chapters on my campus. I wanted to be an executive member so I can change how other people view sorority’s and stop stereotyping them.

I always had a lot of friends in high school. I had a group of twelve girls that I considered my best friends. Having all of these girls in my life though caused me so much drama. There was always some sort of fight occurring that always brought me down. I also always had a boyfriend. This has changed…ALOT. I am no longer friends with most of the girls from my high school and I can’t even think about having a boyfriend. My second semester of my freshmen year of college I was diagnosed with a severe illness that forever changed my life. I found a lump in my breast that was tiny, but scary. Instead of my friends being there for me, they left me. I decided to take my sadness out on my eating which led me to disordered eating. I pretty much only ate vegetables and worked out WAY TOO MUCH. I remember looking in the mirrior and being disgusted with my body. For me, It was never about how I looked, I was just deeply depressed. I started seeing a school psychologist, dietician, and doctor regularily. It was diffiuclt because I had so much going on it was hard to pinpoint why I restricted eating.

I recovered from my illness, made new friends, gained weight back, and am happy as ever. In August 2010, I finally decided to get help with my stomach problems that I was having. I was diagnosed with an allergy to casein which has increasingly gotten worse. I chose to become a vegan and it has made such a positive influence in my life. It helped me balance my eating with working out and I found my “happy” weight. I am experiencing all of these new types of foods that I do not miss ice cream, cheese, or cookies at al(ok, maybe cookies I do miss).I also started reading vegan blogs which helped reassure me I was not alone in any of this. I hope with this site, I can help others overcome their life obstacles like other blogs have helped me! I hope you enjoy!