8.04.2012

those fiesty redheads. they're tipping the scales in the cooper, and lady katza of peanut butter macrame is about to bring the house down with some booty shakin'. LOOK OUT. get in the limo, lady, and tell us about PAYBACK!

The Revenge Prom

Some of you may have guessed that I'm not normal. I don't fit in with the crowd, period. The only high school prom I went to while I was in high school was my Senior Prom. I went with my boyfriend and my best friend/soul sister. Here's me and Veronika at MY Senior Prom.

(This is a great photo of me, and a bad one of her. She's an actress in Germany now and is amazingly attractive. )

Notice I said "while I was in high school". Yes, that's right. I WENT BACK! See, my boyfriend at the time was a year younger than me and I went back with him to HIS high school prom. Our relationship was pretty rocky at this point because I'd all but moved out and had hit the magic 18 and was able to get into a lot of the Goth clubs. And I started working Renaissance festivals and otherwise doing a lot of things you do when coming of age. The biggest revelation of all was that I was attractive.

Yup. Attractive. I was CONVINCED all through K-12 that I was the Ugly Duckling, that I was fat (HA!) and my pale skin and reddish hair made me undesirable. Upon moving to Georgia, one of the biggest contributors to this was some Varsity hotshot named Tripp. My soul sister, Veronika, called him Cro-Magnon man. Which, in retrospect, he totally was. The top of his head was flat from ramming it into other men in tight pants and padding, but I digress. He's important later in this story.

So, in any case, the beau asked me to go to his Senior Prom and I had just spotted THE MOST AMAZING DRESS EVER! But it had to be special ordered, and after batting my eyelashes at Dad, he agreed to buy it for me. I still have this dress hanging in my closet. It was worn by one of my good friend's daughters, who is openly homosexual, and on Homecoming Court. Which is why its the Magical Dress that will never be given away.

It took me a while to find some photos, but this is what I dug up:

(Please to be noticing the computer. Yes, even then I was Total Geek.)

The beau wore a matching vest. We looked Fabulous! And it was at this point in my life was finally convinced that I could stop traffic. It was that sort of confidence that I went back to High School Prom. And I got one of the girl's at the Renaissance Festival to do my hair.

Much of the rest of it was a blur. I know that me and the beau started to fight, but I was mostly ignoring it because there was music and a dance floor. I've always loved to get down and had been having a blast at the different Goth clubs on the 18+ nights. I kicked off my shoes and started to drop it like its hot.

And that's when I got the attention of the Varsity boys. Suddenly I found myself in one of those dance circles shaking my tail feather while everyone cheered me on. Kinda like Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion. And wouldn't you know it, Mr. Flat Head Tripp himself came out to the middle of the circle and tried to do the bump'n'grind with me. WITH ME!!! He didn't even know who I was. What did I do? I stopped dancing, turned around, put my hand in his face and walked away. Everyone watching started laughing at him.

Best. Prom. Ever. I don't have to remember the rest of it because THAT was worth everything else.

turn up the music, ruggy, and lady, be good! we're speeding back to our 'hood, our east coast 'hood, that is, for another virtual pickup in the morning. and i have a feeling she'll be awake and partying when we get there...

7 comments:

Runs across the room the HIGH FIVE THE SHIT outta Lady BAD ASS!! I love the you gave him a silent talk-to-the-hand!! I hate bullies with a fiery passion. And I always root for the already hot girl who finally realizes it!