quote:Originally posted by Coincidence Sitting closest to the escape route made him live that long.

I was wondering if maybe he was the last male Dane to actually become a real man and live his whole life without succumbing to the faggotry that has consumed the manhood of most Danes today. I mean look at our Dane. Have you ever seen anyone look like him who wasn't dying from malnutrition? Eat a Twinkie, Dane. Jesus. I could go on and on about this, but I feel it's only right that I try to keep this message as short as is practicable while still instilling the ideas I wish you to come away with down the stairs to the basement where you could hear the rats scurrying behind the walls. Walls. The cellar was full of walls and behind one of them lay the scroll and Dennison's only chance to find it, translate the recipe on it and prepare the meal to its specification in order to escape the crypt alive, let alone with the lifetime pass to Sea World Florida. "Seaworld, when you can't afford Disney or Sid's Fake Crocodile Wrestling out on RT 6.

Remember, teeth that are brushed before bed won't end up in the ground attached to someone dead. So, have your teeth pulled and stored in our state-of-the-art Tooth Repository, then replace them with our leading dentures so your teeth look great when you die.

As Ben Franklin once said, a tooth beneath your head at night will cause your older brother to attempt to strangle you with his Erector Set cable until your groping hand finds a running chainsaw and goes all "Leatherface" on the fucker.

For more information, please contact Asylum Customer Service at 1-800-947-6325 or 1-800-SIN-SOUP. We only ask that you not send email, parcels of any kind, letters larger than .005mm x .0314mm unless it's Tuesday when we don't ship packages at all.

A short length of 2x4 and a 4 lb dead blow hammer will take care of that roof from the inside pretty quickly. Other than that there doesn't look to be much damage. You might want to get the alignment checked. Glad you weren't hurt, son.