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Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

I think that my daughter is starting to wean. She will be one on the 22nd and during the day she just isn't really showing a lot of interest in nursing. Other than feel engorged I don't have a problem with her nursing less. But I'm worried that if she keeps decreasing her nursing sessions and isn't eating 3 square meals a day that she won't get everything she needs to stay healthy Between the ages of 1 and 2 how often would she need to nurse to get what she needs????

We have EBF for almost a year, she loves foods and her sippy cup now. She likes juices and tea, and kool aid. Choc milk sometimes too. Going to start keeping a sippy of water so she gets used to it. I'm terrified of baby led solids (I kind of freak out when she chokes ) I'm scared that the first time I give her a chunk of something that she is supposed to be able to have that she will choke and die and I can't stop thinking that everytime that someone tries to convince me to give her something. But she loves flavors. I blend things up in the bullet, and we mash what we can with a fork, or cut stuff up into small pieces.

Also, I was thinking about trying to cut down on the nighttime nursing, but I didn't want to take it all away. I don't know if it's any easier to cut back at night or to leave her be and let he choose. (I know DD2 wouldn't potty train for me, no matter what I tried, but when she was ready it was almost instant.) So when I think of trying to make her wean compared to letting her wean herself, I think of that and it makes me think that things go easier and more smoothly when allowed to go on their time.

I hope I'm making since. I starting to doze off

I am also going to start Birth control pills and didn't know if it could mess with our nursing relationship when it's already been a year....

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

When a 1 year old drops sessions so fast that she leaves mom feeling engorged, that makes me worry that she's sick. Is she showing any symptoms of illness aside from reduced nursing?

Between the ages of 1 and 2 how often would she need to nurse to get what she needs????

About 3-5 times a day, with more being better, especially for babies who are closer to a year than to two years, and who are therefore growing faster and more in need of mom's milk.

She likes juices and tea, and kool aid. Choc milk sometimes too.

You didn't ask, but I'm going to give some unsolicited advice anyway, which is that a baby should never have anything other than water or PLAIN whole milk in her sippy cup. Sugary drinks are terrible for her teeth, and they are high in "empty" calories. If you want to give your LO the vitamins that come from juice, it's really preferable to offer the whole fruit- in purée form, if you're that scared of your LO choking. It could be that your LO has learned that she can get super-sweet flavors in her sippy and that's why she's dropped her nursing sessions- who wants plain old mama's milk when you can have Kool Aid?

So when I think of trying to make her wean compared to letting her wean herself, I think of that and it makes me think that things go easier and more smoothly when allowed to go on their time.

Yes, weaning definitely goes much more easily if you let baby self-wean! But if the nighttime feedings get too wearing on you, you can definitely do mother-led weaning for the nighttime sessions and baby-led weaning for the daytime ones.

I am also going to start Birth control pills and didn't know if it could mess with our nursing relationship when it's already been a year...

What kind of birth control pills? Estrogen-progestin combination pills, or the progestin-only mini-pill? The former is likely to cause problems, the latter would probably be okay.

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

She does have a nasty cold, it wasn't really showing itself when she started ignoring me

So if she nurses on and off at night which I'm pretty much okay with, I still co sleep with our 4 and 5 year old DDs also, and then she nurse say in the moring then afternoon and evening, as well as going to sleep at night, a few times through the night, and then while waking in the morning. I don't need to push her to do more.

I've also been bad with the sippy cups. choc milk was always our fav choice. I'm working on getting my girls to have a water bottle/sippy cup that they can have all day long, that I will only put water in. Then for each meal they can choose a glass of something else.

As we move towards the toddler stage of nursing I think that I would rather keep the night and nap time sessions and help her wean from the day/active time nursings. But whether it's contraversal in my neighborhood and family or not I won't make her cry and scream to wean her. I can't see how thats good for a baby.

Birth control- its a combo. The doctor I spoke with said that it shouldn't mess with my supply since we've made it this far. If it can still knock it down drastically I don't think that would be good for my DD3, I don't think she would understand why they aren't working ........

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

I don't really buy your doc's advice on the birth control. But if you decide to take the pill, and you see a decrease in supply, you can always just stop taking it and nurse on demand, and your supply should jump right back up. And if you don't want to take the pill, and want input on other possible birth control options, you can always crowdsource on the forum! I know I love talking about various methods.

I am that making weaning traumatic is terrible for a baby. I don't know why people think weaning has to be al about crying and screaming and misery! Probably because they have never nursed their own children into toddlerhood, and discovered for themselves how babies spontaneously drop most of the nursing sessions as time goes on. If you're open to nursing past one, I highly recommend it as a parenting method. Nothing soothes a cranky, hurt, sick, or sleepy toddler like the breast! And of course, it's great for your health to nurse, and for the baby's nutrition, too. You can drop the chocolate milk and know that your baby is still getting her "dairy" needs met.

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

I've always been a follow the crowd type of girl. it's hard for me to go against the grain so to speak. I don't like to be looked at negatively... Every BFing momma that I have met has either stopped nursing before a year, or in their words, their baby self weaned. But no matter what anyone thinks or says I'm not going to make her cry so that we can wean. There have been times that I want to wean and then on the other hand I want her to stay my baby...

Unless the mommas are staying undercover, I haven't seen any around here that nurse babies, let alone toddlers.

'Crowdsource'?? I have no insurance so I'm all self pay. Our standard b/c was always him pulling out. Which seemed to work ok until my 3rd pregnancy which was a surprise (miscarried) Our 3 daughters were all planned. But I don't want to be so careful all the time I would like to not have to worry about.... So any tips/advise/ideas on birth control that won't force my DD3 to wean before we are ready would be appreciated.

How will I know if my supply is dropping or if she is cutting back on nursing sessions.

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

Originally Posted by @llli*sugarfoot289

Unless the mommas are staying undercover, I haven't seen any around here that nurse babies, let alone toddlers.

You can be absolutely sure that there are mamas out there who are nursing their toddlers and even their children. They're just not doing it where anyone can see- and it sounds like there's a good reason for that. If your area is really as anti-nursing, pro-early-weaning as you feel it is, then you're not going to find mamas who are willing to confess that they are nursing their older babies/toddlers and young children.

If you don't want to be judged by the neighbors, just pretend you're not nursing. Eventually, everyone just assumes that your baby was weaned when all the other babies were weaned. No-one would know that I am nursing a 3 year-old except that I am not a follow-the-crowd type of person and I am therefore very open about nursing. And frankly, I think that you will be happier if you decide to embrace your inner mama bear and lead, instead of follow.

'Crowdsource'?? I have no insurance so I'm all self pay. Our standard b/c was always him pulling out. Which seemed to work ok until /QUOTE]my 3rd pregnancy which was a surprise (miscarried)

So sorry about the miscarriage, mama. Planned or not, it must have hurt to lose that pregnancy.

No insurance does complicate the picture a bit. I was thinking that if you like the pill you might prefer an IUD- there's a hormonal one called Mirena and a non-hormonal one called ParaGard- but they tend to be quite expensive. Of course, so is the pill when you have to pay the full cost yourself!!! And of course the IUDs have various drawbacks- Mirena's hormones can cause supply issues although it is less likely to do so when you have an older baby, and ParaGard can cause heavier than average bleeding. In your shoes, I think I would contact Planned Parenthood and your local women's health agencies and ask if they can do anything for you- maybe there's a way for you to get contraception for a reduced fee if you find the right program to apply to.

A few breastfeeding-friendly methods to consider:
- Diaphragm and spermicide. Relatively cheap- about $50-75 for the diaphragm, about $15 for a tube of spermicide. The fitting may be free or inexpensive if you go to a clinic rather than an ob/gyn. Reliable (around 94% effective with perfect use). Not the most spontaneous method- you either have to put it in before you start rolling around or interrupt what you're doing in order to put it in. Usually cannot be felt by either partner once inserted. Needs to be refitted after pregnancy or substantial weight gain/loss.
- Fertlity Awareness Method (FAM). Reliable when used correctly. Read Toni Weschler's book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" for a good overview on FAM and on fertility in general. One drawback of FAM is that you need to either avoid intercourse on your fertile days or use an additional birth control method (e.g. condoms, diaphragm) during that time.
- Contraceptive sponge, foam, or film. Not the most effective options, but available OTC and relatively inexpensive.
- Condoms. Your husband will love that option!
- Vasectomy!!! If your family is complete, your husband can get snipped. It's an outpatient procedure. Your husband will sit on the couch watching TV and icing his junk for a weekend, and then will be back on his feet. And IMO this is definitely preferable to you being on the strong hormones in the pill for the rest of your reproductive life, or you choosing a tubal ligation, which is more expensive, a major surgery, and much more difficult to reverse.

[/QUOTE]How will I know if my supply is dropping or if she is cutting back on nursing sessions.[/QUOTE]

As long as she continues to nurse, you will continue to make as much milk as she needs. Women don't just spontaneously "dry up" unless they get pregnant or start taking hormonal contraception or some other medication that has a negative impact on supply. The same supply = demand equation that governs milk supply when you have a newborn works with an older baby or toddler, too!

Re: Starting to wean, but need some answers.....

She's almost a year, so it's not like when you have a newborn and can rely on diaper output to tell you whether or not she's getting enough. I think that if she is either acting really frustrated when nursing- like she is having trouble stimulating a letdown- or is simply acting like she's losing interest or nursing just isn't worth the bother... Then you might be looking at supply problems as the probable cause for your nursing issues. If she's nursing frequently, seeming to enjoy nursing, acting satisfied after she nurses, then the combo pill probably isn't causing you problems.