Welcome to the Necro Files, just off Highway 666. Follow the trail of general debauchery and complete and utter murder and mayhem. Reviews of top horror movies. Reviews of albums by top heavy metal bands. Do not feed the Garg!

25 July 2009

Help Wanted

Are you charismatic, intelligent and arrogantly over-confident? If so, a dynamic international company might be seeking your services to further its objectives.

Our secret volcano base. These are the kind of challenges you could expect during your new employment. This microfilm is for your eyes only.

Scientists and industrialists who feel that morality is relative and that the terms megalomaniac and elitist are often abused will enjoy preference for this once in a lifetime opportunity. Candidates will be flown to an exotic island location for selection and training. Candidates must love pets, especially Persian cats, and be immune to British accents. Maniacal laughter is a bonus. You must be willing to sign a non-disclosure agreement.

Meet the boss: This is our CEO, Mr Ernst Stavro Blofeld. The cat is called Solomon. That's Mr Solomon to you.

Compensation: your share of $1 000 000 $100 000 000, negotiable. SPECTRE is an apolitical organisation. We are concerned with economics, not politics. A basic understanding of capitalism and anarchism would benefit you in your new job.