A Canadian is someone who knows how to make love
in a canoe.Pierre BertonAttributed.

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun.Anonymous

After all, we fought the Yanks in 1812 and kicked them the hell
out of our country - but not with blanks.Farley Mowat

Americans are benevolently ignorant about Canada, while Canadians
are malevolently well informed about the United States.J. Bartlet Brebner

America's attic.Patrick Anderson

As far as I'm concerned, I wouldn't want to go to any other
country. It's good enough here.Orviel Kruse

As we enter our centennial year we are still a young nation,
very much in the formative stages. Our national condition is
still flexible enough that we can make almost anything we wish
of our nation. No other country is in a better position than
Canada to go ahead with the evolution of a national purpose
devoted to all that is good and noble and excellent in the human
spirit.Lester B. Pearson

Canada has never been a melting-pot; more like a tossed salad.Arnold Edinborough

Canada is a country so square that even the female impersonators
are women.Richard Benner

Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and
cold fronts. Our main imports are baseball players and acid
rain.Pierre Trudeau

Canada is a place of infinite promise. We like the people, and
if one ever had to emigrate, this would be the destination,
not the U.S.A. The hills, lakes and forests make it a place
of peace and repose of the mind, such as one never finds in
the U.S.A.John Maynard Keynes

Canada is an interesting place, the rest of the world thinks
so, even if Canadians don't.Terence M. Green

Canada is one of the planet's most comfortable, and caring,
societies. The United Nations Human Development Index cited
the country as the most desirable place in the world to live.
This year a World Bank study named Canada the globe's second
wealthiest society after Australia.Time magazine

Canada is probably the most free country in the world where
a man still has room to breathe, to spread out, to move forward,
to move out, an open country with an open frontier. Canada has
created harmony and cooperation among ethnic groups, and it
must take this experience to the world because there is yet
to be such an example of harmony and cooperation among ethnic
groups.Valentyn Moroz

Canada is the linchpin of the English-speaking world.Winston Churchill

Canada is the only country in the world that knows how to live
without an identity.Marshall McLuhan

Canada's national bird is the grouse.Stuart Keate

Canadian nationalism is a subtle, easily misunderstood but powerful
reality, expressed in a way that is not to state directed -
something like a beer commercial or the death of a significant
Canadian figure.Paul Kopas

Canadians are generally indistinguishable from Americans, and
the surest way of telling the two apart is to make the observation
to a Canadian.Richard Staines

Canadians do not like heroes, and so they do not have them.George Woodcock

Canadians don't deal with the same kind of health care problems
and traumas we face. They have a health care system based on
treating hockey injuries and curing sinus infections that come
from trying to pronounce French vowels.P. J. O'Rourke

Canadians don't have a very big political lever, we're nice
guys.Paul Henderson

Canadians have been so busy explaining to the Americans that
we aren't British, and to the British that we aren't Americans
that we haven't had time to become Canadians.Helen Gordon McPherson

Canadians were the first anti-Americans, and the best. Canadian
anti-Americanism, just as the country's French-English duality,
has for two centuries been the central buttress of our national
identity.Jack Granetstein

Canadians, like their historians, have spent too much time remembering
conflicts, crises, and failures. They forgot the great, quiet
continuity of life in a vast and generous land. A cautious people
learns from its past; a sensible people can face its future.
Canadians, on the whole, are both.Desmond Morton

For many years Canada has held an obscure place among the countries
of the globe. Our borders have been pictured as the abode of
perpetual snows, and our people as indifferent, easy-going,
indolent. But change is taking place.Charles R. Tuttle

For some reason a glaze passes over people's faces when you
say "Canada". Maybe we should invade South Dakota
or something.Sandra GotliebWife of Canadian ambassador to U.S.

God Bless America, but God help Canada
to put up with them!Anonymous

I always thought of this as God's country.Jack Granatstein

I am a Canadian, free to speak without fear, free to worship
in my own way, free to stand for what I think right, free to
oppose what I believe wrong, or free to choose those who shall
govern my country. This heritage of freedom I pledge to uphold
for myself and all mankind.John DiefenbakerFrom the Canadian Bill of Rights,
July 1, 1960

I am deeply moved by the warmth and courage of the Canadian
people which I felt so strongly during my recent visit to your
country. Your support of the struggle against apartheid restored
me in my journey home and reassured me that many just people
around the world are with us.Archbishop Desmond Tutu

I am rather inclined to believe that this is the land God gave
to Cain.Jacques CartierReferring to what would be called
"Canada"

I am so excited about Canadians ruling the world.John Diefenbaker

I don't even know what street Canada
is on.Al Capone

I just think you Westerners should take over this country if
you are so smart.Pierre Trudeau

I read and learned and fretted more about Canada after I left
than I ever did while I was home. I absorbed anything I could
on topics that ranged from folklore to history to political
manifestos... I ranted and raved and seethed about things beyond
my control. In short I acted like a Canadian.Will Ferguson

If the general attitude of Canadians toward their mighty neighbor
to the south could be distilled into a single phrase, that phrase
would probably be "Oh, shut up." The Americans talked
too much, mainly about themselves. Their torrid love affair
with their own history and legend exceeded - painfully - the
quasi-British Canadian idea of modesty and self-restraint .
. . They were forever busting their buttons in spasms of insufferable
yahoo pride or all too publicly agonizing over their crises.Bruce McCall

If you don't believe your country should come before yourself,
you can better serve your country by livin' someplace else.Stompin' Tom Connors

In a world darkened by ethnic conflicts that tear nations apart,
Canada stands as a model of how people of different cultures
can live and work together in peace, prosperity, and mutual
respect.Bill Clinton

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise
of nations, it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir.Stuart Keate

In only a century and a quarter since Confederation, Canadians
have shaped out of the North American wilderness one of the
most privileged societies on the face of the earth. Ranking
among the seven most prosperous nations in the world, Canada
is rich not only in the abundance of our resources and the magnificence
of our land, but also in the diversity and the character of
our people. We have long been known as one of the most tolerant,
progressive, innovative, caring and peaceful societies in existence.George Radwanski and Julia LuttrellThe Will of a Nation: Awakening
the Canadian Spirit

It is the task of the rising generation of Canadians to create
a new confidence and a new sense of cultural and civic duty
in Canada. Unless we achieve some success on this front, and
I believe we are beginning to do so, the very real attractions
of the vigorous society to the South of us may attract too many
of our able people. Then the human resources and skills required
to shape and direct a complex industrial economy will simply
not be available to us in Canada.Mitchell Sharp

It is wonderful to feel the grandness of Canada in the raw.Emily Carr

It's going to be a great country when they finish unpacking
it.Andrew H. Malcolm

Keep Canada beautiful. Swallow your beer cans.Anonymous

Many Canadian nationalists harbour the bizarre fear that should
we ever reject royalty, we would instantly mutate into Americans,
as though the Canadian sense of self is so frail and delicate
a bud, that the only thing stopping it from being swallowed
whole by the US is an English lady in a funny hat.Will Ferguson

Our hopes are high. Our faith in the people is great. Our courage
is strong. And our dreams for this beautiful country will never
die.Pierre Trudeau

The beaver, which has come to represent Canada as the eagle
does the United States and the lion Britain, is a flat-tailed,
slow-witted, toothy rodent known to bite off its own testicles
or to stand under its own falling trees.June Callwood

The Canadian is not an American - at least, not entirely, not
yet.Alistair Horne

The Canadians of those days, at least, possessed a roving spirit
of adventure which carried them further, in exposure to hardship
and danger, than ever the New England colonist went, and led
them, though not to clear and colonize the wilderness, yet to
range over it as coureurs de bois, or runners of the woods,
or, as Hontan prefers to call them, coureurs de risques, runners
of risks.Henry David Thoreau

The crisis of Canada today is the combination of economic problems
facing us and the increasing impotency of governments that lack
either the will or the resources to do much about it. The tragedy
of Canada today is that just when we need a country that's pulling
together in common cause, we have one that keeps finding new
ways to pull itself apart.Angus Reid

The huge advantage of Canada is its backwardness.Marshall McLuhan

The reigning Miss Canada has been arrested for punching out
another woman in a bar fight . . . Quite frankly, I think it's
refreshing to finally find one beauty pageant winner who is
against world peace.Jay Leno

The romantic life of each colony also has a special flavour
- Australian rhyme is a poetry of the horse; Canadian, of the
canoe.William Douw Lighthall

The US is our trading partner, our neighbour, our ally and our
friend... and sometimes we'd like to give them such a smack!Rick Mercer

There are no limits to the majestic future which lies before
the mighty expanse of Canada with its virile, aspiring, cultured,
and generous-hearted people.Winston Churchill

Fuddle Duddle.Pierre TrudeauA euphemistic substitution for "fuck"
or "fuck off". Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau
caused a minor scandal when opposition MPs claimed he had mouthed
the words "Fuck off" to them in the House of Commons
in February 1971. Pressed by journalists, Trudeau later unconvincingly
stated he may have said (or mouthed) "fuddle duddle or
something like that." Trudeau likely got the word "fuddle
duddle" from the official Hansard transcript of his words
for that parliamentary session. The Hansard reporter couldn't
make out (or chose not to record verbatim) what Trudeau had
mouthed, and chose to write down the now-infamous phrase instead.
The phrase then took on a humorous connotation for Canadians.

Until I came to Canada I never knew 'snow' was a four letter
word.Alberto Manguel

Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely
visited by anyone but the Queen and illiterate sport fishermen.P. J. O'Rourke

Vive la Canada. This country is not for sale.Don Sweet

We are lucky to live in a country as rich as ours. To break
it apart would be asinine in the highest degree.Barry Gerding

We are tremendously proud of our cultures, heritage and achievements
and we will continue to break new ground. I am proud to be a
Canadian and I hope you are too.Philip K. Lee

We have it all. We have great diversity of people, we have a
wonderful land, and we have great possibilities. So all those
things combined there's nowhere else I'd rather be.Bob RaeThen Ontario Premier

We peer so suspiciously at each other that we cannot see that
we Canadians are standing on the mountaintop of human wealth,
freedom and privilege.Pierre Trudeau

We shall be Canadians first, foremost, and always, and our policies
will be decided in Canada and not dictated by any other country.John G. Diefenbaker

We'll explain the appeal of curling to you if you explain the
appeal of the National Rifle Association to us.Andy Barrie

What is a Canadian? A Canadian is a fellow wearing English tweeds,
a Hong Kong shirt and Spanish shoes, who sips Brazilian coffee
sweetened with Philippine sugar from a Bavarian cup while nibbling
Swiss cheese, sitting at a Danish desk over a Persian rug, after
coming home in a German car from an Italian movie... and then
writes his Member of Parliament with a Japanese ballpoint pen
on French paper, demanding that he do something about foreigners
taking away our Canadian jobs.Anonymous

When I was there I found their jokes, like their roads - very
long and not very good, leading to a little tin point of a spire
which has been remorselessly obvious for miles without seeming
to get any nearer.Samuel Butler

When I'm in Canada, I feel this is what the world should be
like.Jane Fonda

Whether we live together in confidence and cohesion; with more
faith and pride in ourselves and less self-doubt and hesitation;
strong in the conviction that the destiny of Canada is to unite,
not divide; sharing in cooperation, not in separation or in
conflict; respecting our past and welcoming our future.Lester B. Pearson

With or without the Royals, we are not Americans. Nor are we
British. Or French. Or Void. We are something else. And the
sooner we define this, the better.Will Ferguson

You Canadians have given us such hope to carry on. We admire
your bravery. You are the neighbour of such a rich, powerful
country, and yet you don't mind clashing with them. Well, that
gives us more confidence.Pedro Gutierrez

You look at the history -- the aboriginal people welcomed the
first settlers here with open arms, fed us and took care of
us ... that continues today, we welcome people from all nations
to come in and share.Peter Stoffer