Wednesday, 30 July 2008

mogul -- the head of a major studio or communications company; from the title of the all-powerful emperors of India; "Media moguls Rupert Murdoch and Ted Turner have engaged in some heated verbal sparring of late."

moppet -- child, especially child actor; "Elizabeth Taylor is one of the few moppets who made the transition to adult star."

Mouse (also Mouse House) -- the Walt Disney Co. or any division thereof, a reference to the company's most famous animated character, Mickey Mouse; "The Mouse's music division is reuniting with talent manager Alan Smithee on a joint-venture label.

Movie industry bible Variety has published a glossary of its vivid and unique internal slang. Makes great reading, like something out of Damon Runyon. I’m going to start talking like this.

Monday, 28 July 2008

Image via WikipediaSo this guy goes into a coffee-shop (not Starbucks), and orders a triple espresso over ice, and the barista says nuh-uh, against store policy, so the customer gets on his high horse, tries some kind of side-step, eventually leaves a defaced dollar-bill as a tip, and leaves.

Sunday, 27 July 2008

A judge in New Zealand made a young girl a ward of court so that she could change the name she hated - Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii. Judge Rob Murfitt said that the name embarrassed the nine-year-old and could expose her to teasing.

A rare 250-year-old Chinese vase worth £50,000 in mint condition has sold for £25,000 after a hole was drilled in its base so it could be used as a lamp. The porcelain, which dates from 1736 to 1796, was sold at a Dorset auctioneers to an anonymous private collector.

Thursday, 24 July 2008

Google’s answer to Wikipedia is launched. Articles are written by anyone who wants to write one, and the readers may offer edits – but here’s the difference: the author, who will be credited, can take them or leave them.

The selection available for the moment is rather strange, with quite an over-representation of odd medical conditions.

It’ll be interesting to see how it works out. Wikipedia is run by control freaks, but perhaps that’s what’s needed. Google allows authors to control their own articles all the way through the process, but won’t that discourage those who offer edits but are rejected?

It’s led me to one realisation: there’s nothing I know enough about to make up one whole article. And if there were (two main realisations) I don’t think I could be arsed writing a whole Knol article about it. For what?

Hello, my name is Tamara! As you can probably tell, I'm a Christian woman who loves Jesus Christ and cares for all humans, even the wicked. What you probably don't know is that I'm hot. My picture below isn't really that good. I want to use my beauty for GOD, and want to encourage Christian women (my sisters in Christ) to do the same, according to the Great Commission.

Calling all Hot Women of the LORD!!!

So, I created this web page for information regarding the calling of Missionary Dating. First of all, it helps that you're good looking. Romans 12:1 says "to offer your bodies as living sacrifices." Since our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19), it makes sense that we should use our beautiful bodies to glorify HIS name, the Holy Spirit will work the strongest since He's in our body, right? That's the best position to be in!

Not only can we date hot guys (as only hot Christian girls could do), but hopefully we can lead them to God and help them get saved them from the burning fires of Hell. I've outlined a few tips to help you get a date off to the right start, step-by-step. Jesus saves through hooking up with cute heathen guys!

Tuesday, 22 July 2008

Image via WikipediaYou can now get here by typing http://tinyurl.com/SourGrapes, in case you ever forget the address when you're out and about, in Africa for example, and need to use a strange computer.

Get your own custom alias by going to TinyURL and filling in the name of the site you want to alias. Choose an alias, and if it's still available, off you go.

Friday, 18 July 2008

Image via WikipediaThis new phone has got a crappy camera (see photo of Antwerp station) and to get the pictures off you need to go through a whole bloody rigmarole, or else use a simple little Bluetush device to make the transfer painless and easy.

Hmm, Bluetooth, I thought to myself. My chance to get in a spot of toothing, which you've doubtless all heard of, in which you let your phone seek out similar devices in the area, contact them and then hook up for anonymous sex. Sounds amazing, right? Well, itisn't.

To Antwerp today, to visit the archives of the Zoo, which have been opened to the public, about which more later.

I got there by train, into the magnificent new station, built in the bowels of the old station. It freaks me out to be walking along the shopping concourse and see trains at the platform on the floor above, and trains on the level below. I never knew so many people wanted to come in and out of Antwerp.

Here's a picture showing all three levels, enhanced by my newest toy Speechable. Link in the picture.

Wednesday, 16 July 2008

Image via WikipediaSay what you like about the train-wreck that is Amy Winehouse, but this video has had 10 million hits already. This one is on 15 million, and Rehab has clocked up no fewer than 25 million hits on YouTube.

She clearly has something people want, and I don't mean head-lice.

To put that in perspective, though, the top-rated video at this time, that fucking (Worst. Video. Ever.) crappy Evolution of Dance thing, has 92 million hits. Rihanna and My Chemical Romance are up around 43-60 million, and the laughing baby gets 55 million.

So it looks like Amy has quite a bit of suffering still to do. At least she's on track.

Thursday, 10 July 2008

Attention All Fashion Designers With a Dream: Now is your chance to be part of "Project Runway" Season 6, which is coming to Lifetime this November!

"Fashion is about change, so we're looking forward to saying hello to Lifetime, our new fashionable home for our fashionable series," Heidi Klum stated.

Tim Gunn added, "Lifetime and I will definitely 'make it work' together." Are you ready to join Tim and Heidi? If you think you're fierce enough to be part of Season 6 of "Project Runway" and to compete with the best designers in the fashion biz, then it's time to pack up your best sketches and your sewing machines and show us what you've got! Click here for your chance to be a Project Runway Season 6 contestant.

Monday, 7 July 2008

Image by Getty Images via DaylifeBonnie Raitt is just the perfect woman for any woman-lovin man. She's beautiful, with a flaming red cascade of locks, she's ballsy, she rocks that guitar effortlessly, and she sings like a bluesy dream where she's crying out your name but only to say goodbye.

I don't care if it's old-fashioned, I am totally loving her videos on MeTube right now, and her songs on the old EarPod when I'm away from my desk.

Watch the video in that link up there. She is completely in command. I love that in a woman.

Sunday, 6 July 2008

Image via WikipediaHousehold gets back to normal tomorrow. Not before time. I get fed up being alone. Freedom isn't all it's made out to be.

What on earth do single people do? Organising your life is exhausting. There's absolutely nothing you can take for granted. I remember that from before, but we were younger then. We could ride with the punches better.

Now I'm finishing off some work, I'll pack my lunch for tomorrow, then clean the cooker. Everything's looking ship-shape, as clean and tidy as if acts of great depravity had taken place, because the house would never be clean just from living in it, would it?

That's something else that belongs in the past: acts of great depravity. I need eight hours at least, or else I won't be worth shit in the morning. I'd be lucky to muster the energy for an act of eyebrow-raising unseemliness.

Thanks to all those who looked after me this past week. I dare say we'll do it again sometime soon.

Friday, 4 July 2008

Image via WikipediaSo I'm still young at heart. I'm clever. I'm funny. I pay my way. I know this town like the back of my head.

I'm alone this weekend.

And the snot is blinding me. Some new tree species chose today to pollenate, and it's triggered my hay-fever -- which is usually mild-to-dormant. I could paper a room with the paste I'm producing here, blog-dudes!

Hay-fever is Nature's way of saying, "Feelings of spring, huh? Sap rising, huh? Think again, buddy. Forsaking all others, know what I mean?"

Thursday, 3 July 2008

Image by night86mare via FlickrI'd like to have someone famous as my Facebook friend. Someone that made people think, shit is that really his friend? Sort of Hey guys you'll never guess what-type famous.

So far the honour eludes me, and if I'm honest I'd have to admit I'm not exactly raising the tone of anyone else's inbox, if you know what I mean.

Could one or two of you go out and get famous for something? Is that too much to ask? I know Jeff's trying, and he's probably the best hope for all of us. There's Jackson, but he's going to be a TV writer, and how many of those can you name? Some of you other peeps could write a book or something, no?

I really think you could do something simple like that for a pal. What else are friends for?

Travis Bickle: All the animals come out at night - whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies, sick, venal. Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets. I go all over. I take people to the Bronx, Brooklyn, I take 'em to Harlem. I don't care. Don't make no difference to me. It does to some. Some won't even take spooks. Don't make no difference to me.

If you’re reading this in Brussels, you’ll be waiting for the break in the heavy oppressive humidity that comes from the rain that’s now falling. Another apposite quote:

Ned: You can stand here with me if you want but you'll have to agree not to talk about the heat. Matty: I'm a married woman. Ned: Meaning what? Matty: Meaning I'm not looking for company. Ned: Then you should have said I'm a happily married woman.

Wednesday, 2 July 2008

Image via WikipediaGirl Fourteen called me from Rome on Skype (the peeps they're staying with have had their phone lines disconnected because they're coming home) and I think I was short with her. Not short as in curt, but short as in I was already going, I'd better let you go before she'd given me any sign I was boring her.

I thought I was being helpful. Like, I appreciate you calling me but look, feel free to go back to whatever it was you'd rather do. I think I just misjudged. But I'm worried now in case she feels snubbed. Imagine if she thinks I had something else I had to get back to.

Being a parent is like walking a tightrope that has no end, and no end at the other end, either, just all middle, and a fiery pit under you. And you set off to walk it wearing clown-shoes made of carpet-slipper material. And there's never any going back, or changing shoes, or turning around.

I wish there were some way I could tell my mother: I get it now. I get it. I see. But she'd be like, what do you know, you're only a boy. I'm still only a boy for her. That's the entire parenthood paradox right there.

English Genius

You did so extremely well, even I can't find a word to describe your excellence! You have the uncommon intelligence necessary to understand things that most people don't. You have an extensive vocabulary, and you're not afraid to use it properly! Way to go!

This is another Neil Diamond song that's more usually associated with someone else, in this case as far as I'm concerned with the Hollies, though it's been covered all over the shop as many ND songs have.

The Hollies sang it in multi-part harmony, as has become the tradition, but ND sings it here totally alone, and needless to say it's exactly right. All right, he's not the best singer in the world, but the song is a song sung by one man about another, and that's what he had in mind, and that's what he did.

Isn't in amazing how young he is? Judging by the big hair, he's probably a good deal younger than many of us are now. Obviously candidates -- Jeff, nn -- excepted. Of course. I was referring to the grown-ups.