mikehughes38

Month: July 2014

I am going to share my own experience , and how Benzodiazepines have taken their toll on my life and interactions .

These drugs along with many others in that class of tranquilizers are so very dangerous indeed .

I am 47 years old and have been on a number of drugs classed as ”Benzos”.

When I first started using Benzos over 24 years ago , they did the job quite fine, because,….all in all – at that time I was engaged in a work involving Self Transformation , going through some years in the study of spiritual Occultism , Theosophy , the Masters of Wisdom , Hinduism , Buddhism , along with group and solo meditation along the lines of service .

I will be honest to the world , so that others may learn from My experience , and thus save them from a lifetime of terrible withdraw that can plunge it’s way into your head and open ones psyche to the lowest , dark, and an emotional-astral state that may last for years, depending on how long you have been using , how much you are taking, and all kinds of various other complications ,- of which I am not in a positions to speak due to the fact that I am not a Doctor.

However I can , and will share my experience from what I myself went through during such hellish days of my , and millions of others lives.

For some time I was messed up on opiates such as Morphine , Methadone, and so on.

I Would go through withdrawl , discomfort , pain all over like a bad case of some powerful fever. During an Opiate withdraw , all the above will be very unpleasant .

There have been times When I would go through , ……and suffer from a double withdraw.

That indeed is a ”Nightmare Creeping Death.

So many people are self medicating , and taking all kinds of drugs that can potentially be deadly , causing , in time ,- to ones own demise , or in a padded room.

As to my experience , I would rather go through 10 years of opiate withdrawal than three days of Benzos withdraw.

Benzos are extremely dangerous , and withdrawing from them can be fatal indeed.!!

Perhaps some day in the distant future , we all will look back to the primitive age of junk science . We will some day know how clumsy humanity has been down through the ages in their efforts to bring comfort for people in need.

If one needed to buy these pills here in Vancouver B.C , then one would could easily do so by going Downtown to Main and Hastings , { or rather Pain and Wastings!!! }

Not far from where I live one can get a whole lot of various drugs. For example drugs such as all in the Benzos class , Opiates, Mushrooms , L.S.D , Dex , and so much more.

Withdrawing from these Benzos is hell , and I wish it on nobody. This is a battle to the end .

I have great Divine potential,- as ALL do, and therefore must exercise the Will, and find a life free without being dependant on such filth and other vice that are highly destructive.

It is a Big Ball and Chain that keeps you locked into one grid.

Despite my addiction problems I am a quiet peaceful soul who only desire is to help myself , and of course others suffering under similar conditions.

The future of treating addictions and other abnormal morbidities will , and are being developed right now as I write these words.

Please believe me when I speak and write these words ,-..for I have been there , have been through the hell of withdraw from both Opiates and of course – Benzos .

Being a Spiritual Teacher of sorts in no way makes me a ”superman” . I am as well a Human being who is subject to all kinds of weaknesses and temptations just as any other Human being.

If I am to remain as a true Human Soul then I must not wallow in the stench of self pity , that will only , in the end , become a heavy tax upon My health and well-being .

Well , life must move on .

My addictions , and the legions of hardship that will follow me in future incarnations are of my own making, – I have no one to blame but Myself.

However the most important thing as I have said before ,- is not to wallow in self-pity that can make one bitter , sour , un happy , thus declining health, and a bigger host of problems that will follow one for a very long time indeed.

I felt the need to write this and let the reader know the dangers of many a drug ”’They” , { ” Big Pharma”}, wants to test the populous

Well ,..that’s what I feel I needed to say , as one who survived this ”Nightmare Creeping Death” .

If you’re a drug user ,..fine,..so what…but please , .if you have not dabbled with the Benzos ,- like Valium , Ativan , Clonazepam, { ”Rivys” } , Xanax , and other related drugs ,..then PLEASE!! don’t even dare risk being swept up into that spinning chaotic mess!!

I have much more to reveal about how selfless service , creativity , sharing , art , meditation can help us to heal from such a powerful and destructive lifestyle.

I have so much to share with you all ,- however much too long . I will have to write half a page or whatever in future issues of ”The Carnegie” .

May we all love and take care of each other during the changes to come .

Like this:

I would like to share an article by;- Helena R of the Agni-Yoga Teachings.

Throughout my Life I have been a victim of a low and vicious type of Gossip by people who have issues concerning a low self – esteem .

Gossip is a tool used by those of feeble and weak mental and intellectual capacity and other ”psychic – Vampires”

There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to prattle at the dinner table about trifles. There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to toss slander like a shower of small peas. There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to defer an urgent action. There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to show offense like a petty huckster. There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to renounce responsibility. There is no worse act of non-comeasurement than to cease thinking about beauty. Co-measurement is like the pillar that supports the house. We even concern ourselves with the painting of the walls: are we then likely to destroy the pillar under the archway? Thoroughly assimilate co-measurement. Illumination, III:IV:10

3. On the Earth we are much concerned about the body; therefore it is necessary to penetrate into the origins of illnesses. A physician could say to the patient “You have an attack of cupidity,” or “the anemia of self-conceit,” or “stones of treachery,” or “a rash of gossip,” or “a stroke of hatred.”… It would not be amiss to set forth the true causes of the diseases–the spectacle would be instructive. Friends, I repeat–hold your thoughts pure, this is the best disinfectant and the foremost tonic expedient. Community, 23

4. Urusvati knows how harmful it is to pollute space. We have already offered many indications about how to avoid causing harm, but now We advise you not to dwell on mistakes or remain in places where there is blasphemy or irritation. Gossiping about mistakes pollutes the atmosphere around you, and attracts the fluids that will intensify the original errors. Supermundane II, 282

5. Heartiest thanks for your calm and cheerful attitude toward all the attempts and attacks of the dark ones. Often we have heard warnings about planned intrigues and repressions, but after investigation, in most cases, they proved to be only the inventions of the enemies, who hoped to frighten the weak and thus to sap the strength of the whole movement. But you act excellently and wisely in not ignoring a single tale or piece of gossip. By checking them and then eliminating them, you follow the best policy. Letters of Helena Roerich I, 12 August 1934

6. It has been said and repeated that the hour of discourse about the Teaching must be devoid of ordinary gossip. Even though this hour may be more infrequent, yet its quality must be upheld… One of you, observing what is taking place, becomes a self-appointed overseer and sinks into the pettiest irritation. The fabric of the communion is torn and an unworthy mending is begun. We urge you, even if for only an hour, to be consciously responsible people. If an hour a week is difficult for you, then better meet only every fortnight. Learn how to exclude at that time all troublesome beastly habits–smoking, drinking, eating, shallow gossip, dealings in small affairs, censure, anger…. Surely for one hour one can dismiss personal ventures. If this be difficult, how then can you think about progress and growth of consciousness?… Make an effort to give your discourses beauty, simplicity and purity. The most unusual problems of knowledge, the most audacious forms of beauty, should force you out of your musty corner. Understand, I wish to see you, at least for a while, particular and able to absorb. These seeds of cooperative thinking will give you the perseverance for attainments. Not only resolve but also persistence is needed. Community, 125

7. It is desirable to widely gather young coworkers. The Teacher would prefer to see an intense searching rather than petty gossip…. Is it possible to think about the community when occupied with gossip? But the difficulty is lessened when we know that the soldiers of slander may be kept beyond the walls of the new cities. Let slanderers look over the list of everything slandered by them. Will not this be a list of human evolutionary discoveries? No slander has any influence on the effect of evolution. But slander is a devourer of vital fuel, and from the standpoint of goalfitness must be destroyed. An absurd abusive word is not often accompanied by clear-cut thought, but slander, by nature, is akin to everything reared in darkness, and thought carries it inaudibly like an owl in flight. Someone asks, “Why pay so much attention to slander?” The inquirer does not know about economy of energy. It is not necessary to grieve about the road’s being littered, but woe to those who strew the rubbish! Community, 208

8. The yogi is not given to hypocrisy; the yogi is not given to gossip against those belonging to the Brotherhood. Such gossip is equal to treason in its consequences. The yogi knows how much he himself is affected by his own thoughts. The yogi welcomes each sign of evolution. The yogi valiantly recognizes the evil of cosmic refuse and quickly destroys the sources of untruth. Agni Yoga, 173

9. Urusvati knows that from time immemorial all the higher Teachers warned about the harm of light-minded criticism. Even so, the majority of humanity is still predisposed to this flaw. In failing to distinguish between a well-founded, just judgment and critical gossiping, people do not realize what irreparable harm they inflict on their neighbors, and on themselves. People may agree that slander is criminal, but not recognize that they, too, sometimes slander and not even realize the cosmic harm they cause… It should not be thought that slander sown can easily be uprooted. Regrettably, these poisons have a long life and leave indelible traces in Cosmos. Therefore people should think about the responsibility they bear for their judgments. Proper instruction should contain warnings about ineradicable harm. The Thinker warned not to dirty the path with light-minded criticism. Supermundane IV, 801

10. People very often utter the most terrible things without even realizing what they have actually said, besides immediately forgetting their words!… Gossip for gossip’s sake amongst the co-workers is an awful thing. But a teacher should be able to discriminate between mean, ignorant, idle talk and that which is more serious and requires his kindly, heartfelt interference. After all, confessions arise from the necessity of the soul to rid itself of all the accumulated energies that hinder progress. Better to confess to a teacher than to strangers. From experience I know how terribly difficult it is to guide people, and what diverse methods one has to apply to keep in accord with the consciousness and character of each individual. But in most cases, friendliness and warmth of the heart bring the best results. Thus, do not be afraid to listen. This will not be an encouragement of gossip and slander but, rather, a psychological operation on those who trust you, or a mental prophylaxis for them. In many cases you will find the needed explanation and give a warm, encouraging word; and in other cases you will find the words of severity that are necessary. Letters of Helena Roerich I, 18 April, 1935

For some time now I have been struggling with a very wicked addiction . I have almost got it beat ,- albeit with triggers, cravings, feeble minded excuses , and so on popping up everywhere. Over the last few weeks I have periodically been suffering from a powerful nerve agitation due to a ”double withdraw” from opiates and benzo – diazepam use for the last 15 years ago .

Last month I checked myself into a Detox here in Vancouver , and was in there for about ten days or so.

tox for over 20 years , and much has changed regarding group therapy , some have been discarded such as the mandatory 12 Step ”meetings” .

Rather than treating all patience as one ”collected entity” , they have began letting all residents do more or less what they wanted and thus have given addicts rather a time to think back in a retrospective way , – and really contemplate and give thought as to ones future course in life , – as they struggle into a greater measure of Light.

I am being monitored by Doctors who specialize in addictions of all sorts, and have been given medication to help as I learn to wean off these powerful addictions that has really mucked up my life .

I have as well experimented with mind altering plants that have provided me with very deep esoteric insights that I will forever cherish and meditate on ,- as they have led me onto the Path of Service , – selflessly given,- and it is this which has given so much meaning to life as I understand it.

I know the struggle will be long and hard. It will be along the lines of meditation , contemplation, and to exercise the spiritual virtue of becoming more de- centralised , thereby transcending the limitations of the lower carnal personality , becoming members of that growing inner group that tend as the stimulus revealing humanity’s potential for ”Greatness” .

Losing oneself in the service to others human needs ,-is indeed the best medicine that has kept me sane all these years ,- ..and all these years of human suffering have not made me to hate no living thing . As I have been told ; – ” Hate destroys the soul of anyone who tries to teach it ” -..this I know . –

The Divine Presence Within ALL men ,- The Born less One ”, Having no Beginning of Days , and no End of Days .

We all share a common bond within this Great , Living Being ,- that Being the Earth Itself ,..in which we live , move , and have our being. — This I know.- —

Through the activities of the New .Group. of World Severs ;- N.GW.S ;-

Working for this group has opened great vistas before me , SEEING Humanity as a whole with every man, woman and child taking on the responsibility for keeping the ecology clean and protected from those that would but molest , and commit dirty acts for personal profit.

It seems as if every time I go into a deep meditation I am bombarded by strange visions of the near , and the far distant future .
Some time ago I was meditating one night and did enquire to my Parent Star, or – my ” higher self” , what my old stomping grounds will look like two thousand years into the future.

I live here in the city of Vancouver British Columbia all my life , and was very concerned as to how the terrain and general geography will look like two thousand years from now.

As is my way, ; I sat in my big chair and intoned the
” Great Invocation” , next I slowed down My heart rate and commanded the ” elementals” within my ‘sphere of influence’ to bring their activities to a very quiet and calm activity.

During my meditation , I have tapped into future visions for the City of Vancouver.
My first vision was in regards to the Burrard Inlet , which, to my amazement will not exist over the next few hundred years or so.
This suggests to me that the Burrard Inlet has been filled in , and was filled in artificially to connect North Vancouver , and thus provide valuable Real-estate for a growing city , – of which the filled in Inlet will make possible .

During my vision I looked at what is now Richmond , Delta , Queensborough , and a few other places , and it appears that some sort of seismic activity has thrusted these low-lying flat-lands upward a few hundred feet or so.
To my amazement I noticed that Vancouver Island was now attached to the mainland ,- and I did take note of the fact that there were roads of some kind that went from Vancouver – to Victoria without any water to cross.
So beautiful indeed was the sky which I found to be so clean , pure , and a dark blue in which even some stars could be seen in the clean smog less daytime sky.

As I ended my meditation I became aware of the fact that there was no noise pollution , and the air was not so thick with stress , feeble minded people , and loathsome cheap commercialization , which , to my mind, – has destroyed life in the West. We all have seen the devastating events of September 11 , 2001 , ….. and seen the results of a profound corrupt commercialization when America was stricken by the ”Lords of Karma”, I.E –
[ The Law of cause and Effect}.
The living standards in the developed world , and those in poverty stricken and undeveloped places around the world , – must give way to a sense of unity and fairness.
Every man , woman , and child , has the responsibility in the gradual healing and transformation of our ‘Planet’ as a living, breathing , and a Self – Conscious ”Being” with a high degree of Cosmic vision that is beyond our understanding.

Sharing the resources of the world is , and will, produce more stability and constructive activity that will be along the lines of ‘ right human relationships’ based on sharing and Trust.

I Bless ALL humanity regardless of Race , Colour , Religion , or no Religion , Greatness will emerge from all peoples,- Hate Destroys the Soul of anyone who tries’ to Teach It.