Behind the lens and the pen with Rita Jacques Inspiring author and photographer

The world is full of givers and takers. And the takers have no respect for boundaries. It was time to be responsible for my own happiness. I needed to weed out the negativity in my life. And, I knew just where to start. In the garden!

But, I couldn’t do it alone. I enlisted my two daughters’ help.

“I need your help, please. My tendonitis is acting up and I need to pull out the Obedience plants.”

Much as I loved their long lasting late-summer to fall white and purple blooms, a fungus existed in either their roots or the soil. Every day, several plants died. It got to the point I only saw the withered up brown plants. I couldn’t see the forest for the trees; I mean the good plants for the dying plants. I gave them many chances to improve. For several summers, I looked past their imperfections. I stood by them through tough times. But, it was always give, give, give on my part. I gave them water, fungicide, nematodes and Miracle-Gro. You name it, I tried it.

But, no more. I needed to set limits. Draw my line in the sand. I had to remove the plants from my life. Or the soil. I read of a horticulturalist replacing 24” of diseased soil and still the fungus persisted. Heck, I was going to the root of the problem. The plants had to go! I was cultivating a new awareness. Going to surround myself with positive plants. Plants that would bring me happiness. I was going to take charge and identify what I didn’t want in my life. Make some new goals.

“Sure, Mom, no problem.”

The Obedience plants were pulled. Their tuberous roots reached everywhere. I knew change wouldn’t come easy. I just didn’t know it would be this difficult! Covering up the problem with a layer of mulch proved helpful. But, not as helpful as Roundup and more mulch. A person has to take responsibility for their own happiness. And, sometimes enlist those around them for help.

I was grateful for my daughter’s help. I had a new vision of the garden.

The Dis-Obedience plants came back to life and poked through the mulch. I consulted another self-help happiness website. Oh, I see…I needed to laugh more- especially at myself.

I have a farmer friend. He told me he knew of “real” Round-Up. Not the diluted type sold around here. I think I’m going to get some. Get rid of my toxic relationship. I would be free!

I once thought I wasn’t tough enough for any kind of gardening. I didn’t want to pull out any plants, even the ones that were threatening to take over the whole yard!

But once a certain group of tiger lilies overstepped their boundaries and tried to choke off some other faves that I had slaved over, I found out I was ready to pull them up and then salt and burn their remains . . . .