At least then they'd know to put "bunny" in quotes.(Check out how the right one is looking at the label. Heehee!)

Somebody please tell me this is not a cross:

Although if it's not, then the alternatives are looking pretty alarming. Yowza.

Oh! Speaking of alarming religious cakes: I've yet to see a smoking lamb cake this year. I'm still holding out hope, though. And in the meantime, I did spot a few chocolate cigarettes on this "Easter flowers" design:

Sticks and stones may break my bones,but on a cake they sure alarm me.

The madness continues into the cookie section:

There are no words. Only lots of snickering.

And lastly, we have the gold standard of Easter designs:

The bug bunnies.

Jennifer T., Katie G., Steve, Taylor B., Teryn C., John M., & Shelli A., just tell them to take a left at Albuquerque. Oh, and watch out for those "sprinkles."

An Easter pig is really pretty appropriate, since Christians believe that Christ's death and resurrection freed us from the law, thus allowing us to eat pigs. I vote we adopt this as a new symbol of the holiday. Christians can use it to teach doctrine, and everyone else can have a cute (if somewhat bizarre) pink animal.

Oh my, my, my, my, MY! That cross brings nothing but the most UN-religious of thoughts to mind. Definitely need to go spend some time in church now...although I fear I will never be able to look at a cross the same way again! Thanks, Cake Wrecks. Happy Easter to me.

Oh gross, FEATHERS on a cake?! Feathers are totally dirty and mite-ridden! Now, I'm no cooking expert, but even if they've been cleaned and bleached, I doubt that any companies produce food-grade feathers.

This does not make the cake better, but the "cross" really looks like a typical italian easter cake. It is called Colomba and is supposed to look like a dove, symbol of peace. It looks like this: http://www.gingerandtomato.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/144_47.jpgBut I don't think you are supposed to decorate it like that.

The second-to-last one, the bunnies and carrots... I agree, we have a new one: BUNNY carrot jockeys. Hot dang, maybe they are making them on purpose? No... we're not that lucky. Thanks for my morning chuckle!

Yeah...I agree that the "Easter Pig" is a Care Bear ...but not a bear...one of the Care Bear's friends. You know...like their lion friend named "Lionheart" or their elephant friend named "Strongheart" or whatever. I guess the pig could be called "Cholesterolheart"The second thing with the feather ears must be an alien version of a bunny. Some sort of critter from "Lost in Space" or something.The "Bunny Cakes" with the plastic lamb faces are yet another example of people slapping "plastic flotsam" on a cake in a pathetic effort to cash in on some sort of holiday/event that they know or care nothing about.

The last cake looks more like a bunch of butterflies with their wings ripped off... =(

As for the gingerbunny cookies, I guess the bakery made too many gingerbread men over the Xmas season. Instead of being wasteful by throwing them out, they just revamped the decoration design! Now THAT'S resourceful!

The chocolate - thingie - reminded me of one of those folding omelet pans (example here), which just makes the lamb-in-the-middle even more wrecky. [Although now it's making me imagine other Easter-themed omelets; Peeps, perhaps?]

those bunnies--snug as bugs in rugs. they look like they're having a campout in sleeping bags. another interpretation of Bugs Bunny perhaps? Is it raining orange sprinkles? if those are supposed to be carrots they're eating, why are they mutant sized? and why are some, er, PHALLIC (look on the left edge).

they look like scared little ghost bunnies.

The Easter pig is cute, but he's a pink pig. at Easter. with a nest. and he looks like he's eager to devour what's in it.

ooh. the pink coconut crusted cat is scary. nasty long claws. or scared--the coconut makes his little pink fur look like it's standing on end. the wide fruit loop eyes. the feather wings--is he going to heaven? what? that's supposed to be a bunny with feather ears? yah. whatever.

um, the clover leaf/fleur-de-lis hybrid cross looks like it's covered with little tiny bones. and the sheep looks a little frightened. is this the graveyard for sacrificial lambs? and is that dove a scavenger picking at the bones? or is he bringing the lamb the message of his doom?

the logic of cigarettes on the messy CCC garden escapes me. as does my appetite. what a lovely shade of green. *turns green*

Those cookies are inexplicable. a gingerbread cookie? with a tiny plastic flotsam bunny? eating a huge carrot? after obsessively compulsively "hiding" eggs in plain sight on all four limbs of the cookie? could we at least have TRIED to make it look like there's some grass here? instead of a muddy flat? or is it SUPPOSED to still be a gingerbread man sacrifically pinned down with jellybeans and a bunny on his face? really, wreckerator. this is a mockery of the crucifixion.

You have never heard of the Easter Pig? I am from South Central PA and he is a big deal here. The Easter Pig visits after the bunny has hopped through and eats the chocolate out of the baskets of the bad children. Kind of like Santa leaving coal in the stocking. The Easter Pig only leaves wrappers....

I must have an Easter Pig cake! My Dad always used to sing "Here comes Porky Corkscrew Tail, hopping down the Piggie Trail, hippity-hoppity, Easter's on its way." Made the traditional Easter ham that much more disturbing . . .

regarding the "easter flowers" with cigarettes (or tampon applicators. . .) cake, why is there an alarming number of randomly lopsided CCCs (ptooie!)? it's not that hard to make a kind of regular shape with cupcakes. it's kind of sad how lazy you'd have to be to look at a group of randomly arranged cupcakes and say to yourself: "that's kind of a rectangle shape. if you're not looking at it too closely - good enough. where's the vat of icing and tub of unappealing decorations?"

i think that pink thing is really the pink evil bunny of death (with really fuzzy ears). i mean just look at those claws!! and i'm totally not understanding the bunny heads with gingerbread bodies. nope, just doesn't compute.

The "cross" cake is actually a Colomba Cake. It's know in Brazil (because of the Italian immigrants). It symbolizes a dove (I know you have to use your imagination a bit) and the coming of the Holy Spirit. Here's a picture of a classic Colomba: http://tvtem.globo.com/banco_imagens//canalnews/%7B376B4B09-1E42-45CE-8FDC-A7662AF0E099%7D_colomba01.jpg

The cake tastes almost like a Panettone (classic Christmas cake in Italy) but it's a little lighter.

OK, now that the serious part is over...

Pink Cat with feathers??? I want to see someone come up with an explanation for THAT! haha

I dunno what you're seeing when you look at that "cross", but I'm seeing an unexplainably brown pantyliner. The kind with "wings".

And is it just me, or is that last cake topped with the "prancing pink bugs" in Rasputin's lair from Anastasia, who sing backup to his song "In the Dark of the Night"? To quote what the Nostalgia Critic said about that: "..........FAIL!"

Speaking of Monty Python, @Kathy in Kansas, the demented feathered bunny is clearly a relative of the killer rabbit in Monty Python's Holy Grail. I would be very afraid to have that on my Easter table.

I, too, saw Mr Hanky in Easter Bunny garb (multiplied many times) on that last one.

What? You've not heard of the traditional Pink Easter Cat and the Carrot Gingerbread Men? That travel together and bring ugly "bunny" rabbits to Jesus at Easter? HAVEN'T YOU READ THE BIBLE? ;)Its all right THERE!!!

After laughing so hard I almost wet myself yesterday and causing my coworkers to think i'd genuinely lost my mind.. I came back today only to discover orange bunny sperm.. I spit my slushie on the screen... did I mention I work in a Dr. Office?

Thank you so much for a bright spot in my day. I now come to your site daily to get my fix of laughter. I even read ALL the past posts of your blog. I even had to get my inhaler out- I was laughing so hard I couldn't catch my breath. Thank you so much for your blog. It never fails to amuse and we all need a good laugh every day. Keep up the good work!Lynn :)

i just had to say that you were featured as an answer in today's yahoo crossword puzzle! twice! (sorry if this was already brought to your attention, i didn't have time to check all the comments first)

I was thinking that maybe the cigarettes on that dubious cigarette cake were because the recipient had given up smoking for lent, and with the arrival of easter would be able to once again indulge in a little bit of cancer inducing oral combustable based activity?

Cake#1. Pig, huh? HUH!#2. Looks kind of like a dust mite (I looked it up in a microscopic dictionary). It just needs to grow a few more legs, and lose the "caught-in-the-headlights" look, especially since dust mites have no eyes.#3. Again... HUH!#4. Okay, I'll tell you that "It's not a cross." But really, it is. A cross between a migraine and an acid trip.#5. Packaged display of what was just swept up out of the gutter. (Niiice.)Or possibly an employee *inside joke*. #6. Oh-oh, here it comes againnnnn: HUH.#7. This one is EASY! It's a hospital nursery! ("Oh, Mr. Bunny--come and see your 10 new daughters!")

OMG you crack me up every time. I don't know where you continue to find these crazy cake wrecks, but your comments and captions are sublime. I take my hat off to you, and I shoot coffee out of my nose all over my keyboard in your honor... Note to self: Don't try to drink coffee while reading this blog!

Oh thank you THANK YOU for the best laugh I've had all day. For realsies, those were some of the most atrocious things I've EVER seen! And most alarming, that lamb on the "cross", except that cross was slightly fallic. Ewww!

Oh I can't imagine why anyone would put bunnies on the faces of gingerbread men.. scary scary bakery that is. That second cake looked like it had been electrocuted and put on a shelf. Honestly if those cakes are the best they can do I suggest they give up and go back to whatever it is they were doing before ruining cakes lol.

Anonymous said..."@Ayla. never fear. the feathers are pink. nature does not produce pink birds..."******AHEM* I beg to differ, little missy (or mister, as the case may be), but what color do you perceive FLAMINGOS to be? My vote is for "pink."Granted, they only turn pink because of their diet (shrimps), but it's still ALL NATURAL. msyendpr said...Cake #2: first thought: special Hostess snowball cat created to hunt down the Peeps.*****Liking it! =^~.~^=

Cake 4: no, not a cross. Was it an Italian bakery? It looks very similar to our traditional Easter cakes: we actually call them "doves" because they (are supposed to) look like (very) stylized doves - try googling "colombe pasquali."

I didn't expect to jump. That pink "bunny" is frightening beyond belief. I mean, REALLY scary. Forget clowns, needles, and confined spaces, that thing will be in my nightmares for years to come. The only responsible thing for me to do is make a wrecckplica for my son. For all three of them. Hehe. Fear is slowly being replaced with evil intent...

Search This Blog

Wreck the Halls

NEW! Pre-Order Today!

Buy the Book

Buy the NYT Bestseller

What's a Wreck?

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

order

Where's the book?

We don’t have any copies of Cake Wrecks for sale here, autographed or otherwise. We decided the shipping and handling costs would be too high to make it worth your while. So instead, buy your copies locally or online and then order personalized bookplates: it’s cheaper, easier, and I think even looks a bit nicer.

Ordering Info

Payments must be made through Paypal, which accepts all major credit cards. Sorry, but that means no checks or MOs or barter-based chickens.

We ship everything first class USPS, and will do our best to have your package in the mail within 2 days of your order.