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Yay, Red. I'm so glad that you're calm about this. I think that makes a world of difference. Will keep sending hugs and positive vibes your way. The statistics are definitely on your side!

Definitely! This thing is most likely benign, but if it isn't, I'm really glad I found it and got it checked out right away. I'm a huge procrastinator (have to be, it's in the slacker handbook) but if it is malignant, waiting is really bad. I've read enough of your stories, and been impacted by them, Marni's for example, to know that this could happen to me, or any of us. Even though I "do everything right" better people than me get cancer.

Well, I didn't get the biopsy today. After the radiologist looked at it, he determined there was a possibility he wouldn't be able to get a good sample. He didn't want to put me through the procedure (it's in a very sensitive area) if he wasn't sure he could get to it. He was very kind and gentle. I could feel his hesitation, so I decided to go with his gut. I'll be having a surgical biopsy instead.

I'm glad that he was honest about it, but I'm sorry you keep gearing up for this only to have it put off. Are you still doing okay? What will a surgerical biopsy entail?

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

The surgeon will excise the whole lump. It will be a local anesthetic, but I'll be sedated. There will be an incision and stitches. My friend just had this surgery 2 weeks ago, so I know what to expect (she slept through the whole thing). She said it hurt afterward, but she doesn't believe in pain meds. I do. Why suffer?

At least then it will be gone, and not something I'll always be wondering about. It's probably a good thing.

I have no idea when this will happen. I'll be getting an appt tomorrow.

Ha! The quick and easy boat has sailed! I'm okay with it, though. My pulse was in the 50s in the office today, so I'm pretty calm still.

I have to say, this hospital is awesome. They never left me alone in the room. They had someone meet me when I got there, and sit with me while I waited to go in. They brought me a towel for over my eyes (my idea). It was almost like being in a spa, minus the great stuff.

Although they are drawing this out, it is rare to find someone so honest! That is a good sign.
It sounds like a great hospital. The surgery doesn't sound that terrible, in the total scheme of things. I would take the pain meds, too.

Yeah, if the sedation is anything like what I got for my colonoscopy this past spring, you'll sleep right through the procedure. I'd actually prefer that to the alternative! And pain meds, I'd sure take 'em too!

Take the pain meds and stay ahead of the pain. The ones they can put in the IV line make a huge difference in a matter of seconds. And, if you are cold... they have warm blankets. If the sedation is anything like I've received, the 'reboot' of your brain is fun in a weird sciencey way.

Tomorrow is the big day. I find myself mourning my normal old breast. It wasn't anything to write home about, but in retrospect, it was perfect. But, soon the lump will be gone. It may not be perfect after, but it wasn't even when it was, so who cares!

At today's consultation with the surgeon, she said she'll be removing a walnut sized piece, which to a surgeon is tiny. It's huge to me, especially since I'm small. I told her I'd rather she take less, since it's most likely benign, and she agreed to. I'm glad I spoke up. I suppose this means if it is cancer, more will have to be taken later, but I'm willing to risk that. Keep your fingers crossed I'm making the right decision!