The top ten worst Valentine’s gifts

February 14 is supposed to be a day to celebrate romantic love. But let’s face it: these days, it’s become more of a test of how much money men are willing to splurge to make their other half feel ‘special’. And some gestures just aren’t good enough, guys. Here are the top ten worst Valentine’s Day gifts, according to a poll of 1,000 women.

1. Petrol station flowers – Those puny, wilting bunches of cheap blooms, half-choked from forecourt fumes, were picked as the ultimate horror by 20 per cent of those surveyed.

2. Tacky jewellery – Diamonds are, of course, a girl’s best friend, but jewellery comprised of paste stones and cheap metal that turns your skin green are a no-no for 17 per cent.

3. Large cuddly toy – Fancy infantilising the woman in your life? Plush bears bearing big hearts get short shrift from 16 per cent of women.

4. Bargain bin CD – A lovingly compiled audiotape was once a surefire route to a girl’s heart. But naff ‘romance themed’ compilation CDs going for a song? Completely off-key, according to 13 per cent.

5. Unflattering underwear – Men’s and women’s ideas about the perfect lingerie set can differ dramatically: you see a vision of sexy titillation; she’s clocking tarty cheap nylon and scratchy lace.

6. Bottle of cheap perfume – A woman can spend years finding the perfect scent; the two for one nasty niff in a bottle you’ve grabbed in a panic makes eight per cent of women turn their nose up.

7. All you can eat buffet voucher – Gourmet cooking wakes all the senses and is a sophisticated way to show you care; all-you-can-eat buffet vouchers, in contrast, are not classy, say six per cent of women surveyed.

8. DVD of his favourite action films – Gentlemen: the old adage that you should always give something you would like to receive yourself does not extend to this. It almost beggars belief that hapless men have actually offered this as a Valentine’s gift in the first place, until you look at No.9…

9. Tickets to a football match to watch his team – Three per cent of women politely suggest that this is a surefire way for men to be shown the red card.

10. Bar of chocolate – Not a box of chocolates, mind: one solitary bar of chocolate. Mind you, it’s better than nothing, and you don’t have to share, which is may be why this stingy treat only rankled with one per cent of women surveyed.

A solitary chocolate bar is not the height of romance (Picture: Alamy)