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Author
Topic: newbie here with a strange situation (Read 1718 times)

Hi all. First time poster here. I hope you all are doing well. Maybe someday I will get there.

My situation is a little strange, but nothing about any of this is normal. Thanks for taking the time to read my story (if you do!).

I am a 31 year old hetero male. About 10 months ago, i started feeling rather odd. Several days of "symptom surfing" had me convinced that I was HIV+. The thing that really got me was reading about neuropathy. I have genital herpes and have for about 10 years, and I had always associated the tingling and burning pain in my feet and hands and all the way up the back of my legs to the herpes neuralgia, even though the sensations were not confined to my genital area. I would feel the tingling and burning, which was sometimes symmetric and sometimes not, and within a day or two I'd have an outbreak. i always have had more frequent, yet mild, outbreaks. Anyway, after reading about neuropathy and recognizing those sensations as something I had been experiencing for years, I was convinced I was HIV+. I was shocked at how my body, at that point, could start to mimic symptoms. Never having had night sweats, I would wake up an hour after I went to be with a sweaty head and neck. I was having all sorts of GI distress. I finally took a test, but opted for the anonymity of the HomeAccess test. Got the courage up to call, and what do you know, I was "negative". My "symptoms" didn't disappear immediately, which caused me to question the result. However, after a month or so, things started to get back to normal and the HIV scare was moved to the very back of my mind.

About 2.5 months ago, I had the familiar pains of the neuropathy come on quite strong. But instead of subsiding after a few days, they remained. Finally after a few weeks, I had a brief break from them for about a week. But then they came back, intense and constant. I had begun to notice a while ago (as far back as a year ago) that I was starting to have problems achieving an erection. In these past 2.5 months, I would go so far as to say it has become impossible. Not only that, but it almost looks as though I was never circumcized, though I have been. The ED and the shrinkage started to sound like hypogonadism. To top it all off, I have noticed changes in my body, mainly the loss of muscle in my legs. I read elsewhere about a person talking about the twitching feeling in the muscles, and that is something I feel a lot. I can tell that my legs have become more skinny. Then, to top it off, I have experienced some fat redistribution as I am starting to grow a large double chin.

So, despite a negative HomeAccess test outside the exposure window 10 months ago and no potential exposures since then, I am experiencing what are quite severe and advanced HIV symptoms, namely neuropathy, erectile dysfunction, and muscle loss and fat accumulation. I am just at a loss for thoughts and words as it almost feels worse after feeling like I did the responsible thing last summer by testing, but getting an erroneous result somehow. I know that supposedly a negative test trumps symptoms everytime, but the symptoms I am experiencing are very real and from what I have read, pretty much unmistakeable for HIV.

The hardest part in all of this is that I got engaged last fall and had been really looking ahead to the rest of my life. The thought that I may have infected my fiance would be enough to kill me. I know that the only thing for me to do is go get retested so I can start on a treatment regime, but I am just "destroyed" as my handle indicates. If it was just the ED, I'd think it was all in my head. But the neuropathy and the muscle loss in my legs....those are classic signs of untreated HIV infection. I had a pretty careless early 20s, so now at 31, this would be the time that these sorts of symptoms would be opccurring in an untreated person such as me.

I would advise against anyone taking the HomeAccess test and counting on those results. I am not sure why I tested negative, and I suppose clerical or technical errors can occur with any method.

Hi Winiroo, thanks so much for reading my story. I have not been re-tested, I am going this week.

I know that neuropathy and lipo are commonly associated with some HIV meds, but from what I have learned is that they are also caused by untreated HIV infection as well, which would apply to my condition.

As you have not just tested positive, you have no business posting in the "I Just Tested Poz" forum. I'm moving your thread to the "Am I Infected" forum where it belongs until such time as you do test hiv positive. Which, by the way, I don't expect you will.

Make sure you read and abide by the posting guidelines found in the Welcome Thread. Thank you for your cooperation.

Symptoms are meaningless when it comes to diagnosing hiv. Only testing will reveal your hiv status and with one negative result at the appropriate time and no further "exposures", I don't expect that result to change.

You don't say what your "exposure" was but unless it was unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse, you likely didn't have a risk in the first place. If it was unprotected insertive vaginal, you didn't have a very high risk at all.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

i would suggest you get tested again and clear this out of your brains, it could be you have a different condition from HIV but because you have channeled your brains to believe that you are poz, of course you will see the signs and symptoms which are associated with it. Clarify your situation first by testing again or stick to the negative results and sick medical attention on how you are feeling now. Self diagnostic its the worst thing to do to yourself, hopefully its just something minor and nothing to do with hiv, Get well soon, all the best

I am just still confused how this could happen after the supposed negative Home Access test result, but PN, ED, and muscle loss sure are serious symptoms.

Yes, but they're not specific symptoms of HIV. In fact the symptoms you refer to could be caused by any number of things.

But symptoms are irrelevant. HIV transmission and diagnosis is all about risks and testing at the appropriate time. I agree with Ann here. I doubt your negative result will change if/when you test again.