Mother Mess is a song about my experience with an aggressor

This song shouldn’t happen really. It’s barely a song but rather a testimonial. A testimony after-damage, after everything was done. There’s no child anymore and there’s no mother anymore, only a story after-damage. I’m quite good at being emotionless I have to say.

There was a huge struggle to put it out, even at this very moment, I’m thinking I should not write what I’m writing. ‘Mother Mess’ is a résumé of my entire experience with an aggressor, a very close one.

For some peculiar reason, I find singing about tragedies with a non-affected voice is quite aesthetical. I think it’s a real overcome of a tragedy if you think about it. Everything can be aesthetical, humans are hugely complex in feelings. Having said that, ‘Mother Mess’ is still not completely emotionless either, so it’s a failure in that respect also.

This song is out of cast compared with the repertoire I normally do. Mind you, every time I talk about my repertoire I don’t know what I’m talking about really. It’s like when you repeat the same word over and over again and it loses its meaning. A blank moment, that’s our repertoire to me. I focus myself mainly in the relationship between words and body language and the result is unconsciousness, is something I don’t know how to catalog yet. I’m still researching myself.

It’s quite interesting that everyone else seems to know what Starsha Lee is about better than I do… It’s not the first time I read somebody associating me with my guitarist’s ex-bands and they put me in this family of bands that I barely know of, its a background I have no connection and zero influence from. People place me in this continuity of something I have no contact with.

‘Mother Mess’ is the end of a chapter in monochrome style because I’m not good at whining. A lack of mother and a lack of a child.