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Friday, February 11, 2011

What Day is it?

It's Friday, which means this is one week of having cut opiates from my daily life. I have a new appreciation for Celebrity Rehab. I recall seeing some starlet trying to kick painkillers and going, "Oh come on it's painkillers not heroin!" Well, surprise surprise, it's the same shit, the same withdraw, the same everything.

Here's the point of "is it worth it?". Aside from the weewahs in my brain, the pain increase which is amazing, and the inability to balance, I'm shaking and even typing is a challenge. This is a point I've reached in quitting everything. When the withdrawls are at peak, it sure seems tempting to grab those drugs and get relief- even for just now- but that isn't the way it works. It's all or nothing. Staying in the nothing is the right thing, but it ain't easy.

The dr gave me a tranqulizer, which is good for the panic and even a portion of pain, but won't be a permanent prescription. At least I got sleep, which is a godsend. But I'm a mess, still, and there ain't no pink cloud on the horizon.