2012 Special Reports Library

John Klossner's Ink Tank

While doing research for a cartoon and blog entry on open source software, I made a couple discoveries:

* Current discussions on Web 2.0 systems -- specifically social networks and cloud computing -- focus on the security questions that arise with new technologies. Many of these comments border on paranoia: After reading the comments sections of several articles, in fact, I worry that by posting this blog entry my bank account will be emptied tomorrow.

I call this the superhero phenomenon. Let's face it, the first time a guy showed up wearing long underwear with briefs on the outside (not to mention a cape and mask), folks weren't too ready to accept this as "help." People probably grumbled about how somebody that dressed this way couldn't possibly be secure, that a cape would be of no use in cold weather, and that those booties didn't look very safe (what if the car he was lifting dropped on his foot?).

But after watching this underwear-clad person lift a car, prevent a building from collapsing or win a reality show, people started to trust the underwear-on-the-outside guy. A couple influential voices might have even had their businesses saved by the superhero, allowing them to spread the word and winning the public over to the masked guy's side.

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Entries / questions from comments sections when the first superhero appeared

* A recent battle between a superhero and a mutant space alien caused tremendous damage to the downtown infrastructure, resulting in increased taxes. Should we expect this from all future "rescues?"

* The entry into our community of superheroes will attract evil geniuses intent on battling these caped freaks. Are we prepared to suffer the threat this presents to our security?

* If this person uses x-ray vision, won't that contribute to climate change?

* Our local superhero hasn't provided us with a birth certificate. Should we allow him to save us from the mad scientist who lives on the next street?

* How soon until these "heroes" will start presenting us with invoices for services rendered? Or go to the other side for a better offer?

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I'm not saying open source is a superhero; it's more like a team (the Fantastic Four, say). I'm just pointing out that open-source software is going through the same process in gaining public acceptance as superheroes did (and Web 2.0 technologies probably will). But this takes time, allowing for maturity of the technologies and public acclimation.

I imagine that social networks and cloud computing -- not to mention whatever technology is released next week that will make communications easier but have security concerns at the start -- will, by a combination of users becoming more comfortable with them and the providers fixing any glitches, be acceptable in the next few years. In the meantime, we need a superhero who can defend us from the comments sections.

I recently spent a couple afternoons reading through the many submissions received during the brainstorming phase of the Open Government Dialogue. This was before the site was commandeered by some single-issue Web crawlers who eventually flooded the site with their, well ... single issue. (For a more extensive description, go here).

But in the good old, innocent days, the Open Government Dialogue site provided a wide variety of suggestions for improving our government. Here are some that caught my eye (Note: I apologize for missing any newer entries. This being the Internet, things change quickly, and my recording of one moment on a Web site will almost certainly eliminate later worthy candidates):

SOCIAL MEDIA MADE EXCLUSIVE — Government use of social media should focus more on small groups of smart people arguing with each other. I believe this idea has already been implemented. They call it the Kennedy School.

CREATE A GOVERNMENT CABLE CHANNEL — Create a government cable channel devoted to delivering news and information about the government. I believe this idea has already been implemented. They call it the Kennedy School.

GETTING CREDIT FOR IDEAS — People who provide good ideas get recognition. I found this one a little self-referential. If you provided the good idea of giving recognition to the other good ideas, should you get bigger recognition?

ESTABLISH A GOVERNMENT INTRANET — Create a Government-wide Intranet. The proposal states that this Intranet will "facilitate vital information sharing and collaboration across the entire U.S. federal government." But federal employees will still have to use the regular Internet to access YouTube.

LEGALIZING POT / BACKING OFF OF THE DRUG WAR — Calls for legalizing or re-classifying marijuana and cannabis. Before the Obama birth certificate issue came up, this may have been the most popular proposal. Maybe these folks and the birthers should get together and form a marketing firm.

ELIMINATE ELECTORAL COLLEGE — No unintended humor here, but I found the debate in the comments section to be rational, respectful and informative. Unfortunately, like the Electoral College, I worry that these qualities might also be arcane.

REDUCE THE EFFECTIVENESS OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT — Wait: By reducing the effectiveness of the federal government, we'd be increasing the effectiveness of the federal government? But then we wouldn't be reducing the effectiveness of the federal government ... wait ...

And my top 3:

No. 1: CUT DOWN ON NUMBER OF PENS USED IN BILL SIGNINGS — I need a little more information here: Should we have two presidential pens? Should there be a decoy pen in case of theft? Should there be a specific Secret Service position for carrying refills?

No. 2: WINDMILL IN IOWA — Build a giant windmill in Iowa, for tourism and alternative energy purposes. Not a bad idea, but then they'd have to build something for each state, and I worry that the giant clown in New York State would scare my children.

No. 1: FREE PIZZA ON FRIDAYS — I'm kind of surprised that this didn't get a more positive response, scoring a miserable -42. Who could possibly be against free pizza?

I am new to the grudge match between federal employees and federal contractors. Like lions and hyenas, Yankees fans and Red Sox fans, the French and everybody, there seems to be a natural conflict here. While reading the comments section of a recent FCW Insider piece on this issue, I wondered if there was some sort of list or primer to help us identify the combatants -- er, co-workers.

CIVIL SERVANTS...

CONTRACTORS...

will let you know within 5 years that they are a federal employee

will let you know within 5 minutes
that they are contractors

can lose job by filling out necessary paperwork
and waiting for response