Fuck you, My bread is made by SCIENCE.

That’s right. I don’t go in for all that multi-grain, whole wheat, whole grain bullshit. If I want my bread to taste like twigs and dirt, I’ll eat twigs and dirt. No, MY bread is made possible by the wonders of mutherfuckin’ science yo. That’s because I eat WonderBread. And that stuff is fucking delicious. It’s crammed full of all sorts of vitamins and minerals that I can’t even say the names of, with impressive sounding words like Omega and Riboflavin.

Now, I’m not saying you’re wrong if you eat regular old white bread, or whole wheat bread, or even multi or whole grain breads. I’m just saying you’re not as right as I am, that’s all.