Do Not Read This Drew Doughty Update

While in bed and reading about the merits of the slow motion practice method to the golf swing, I diverted my attention and checked my emails on my phone. Our source sent me an email at 10:57pm tonight…I read it at 11:32pm. I am typing this at 11:33pm.

You shouldn’t read this. Click away, go back to what you were doing. Please.

*sigh*

If you must know, we are now told everyone spoke on the phone today. The LA Kings and Drew Doughty have reached a deal. Take your grain of salt, add Excedrin or whatever suits your migraine needs…better yet, whiskey, neat.

I am telling you what I have been told. I am the messenger. If this is wrong, by all means, kill the messenger. I offer myself as the martyr. You bring the altar.

I don’t have the details. Our source has tried to get it but nothing yet and, quite frankly, I wasn’t even going to post this until we had the terms but it’s late and I felt compelled to tell you what I know despite the fact right now, somewhere, someone’s unmentionables may be getting in a twist. I obviously don’t know when the Kings will announce it. Will they wait until Fan Fest? That would be fun…a bit sadistic but fun.

If I were you, I would ignore this article and get some deserved sleep…I am now stuck trying to hide my head under pillows each time my phone makes a noise alerting me to a new text, trying to avoid checking emails, and I don’t want to hear the phone ring…a similar plight as our source. Anticipation of death is worse than death itself. Nothing to see here. Move along.

35 replies

I love when shit says dont open or dont read
good stuff
a co-worker once took a really nice girly box and
wrote “don’t open this” on top. Two different chix screamed when they opened it and saw the huge cockroach running around inside

Well, either way, you’re right, they’ll get a deal done no matter what happens.

Take that Quisp.

But either way, it’d be nice, if this was true, that they’d announce it sooner than later so the collective population of King fans can first bitch about the contract and then collect ourselves and be psyched for the season.

I had some ideas on the blog you wrote about the fan experience inside of Staples Center and what we can do to liven it up. When I get some time I will write it.

Even if the Kings intend to keep a deal secret til Hocey Fest, it’ll leak. You can’t keep these things secret in this day and age. I hope you’re right, Bobby. This has officially dragged on way too long and is now worse than the Kovy fiasco last summer. But all will be forgiven with a signed contract. Go Kings!!!

Fwiw, I am struggling with this right now. Without the terms, I believe this is a rumor and why I struggled to post it. I had to balance that with candidly telling you what I heard. My source is not 100% on it and bluntly neither am I. With that said, we will see.

I meant to say profit, not world domination, but I haven’t smoked a cigarette all day and I’ll feeling scattered and hostile, so world domination came out.

But to continue today’s trend of hostility…. your goal is not world peace. You are a violent daredevil, own up to it. Or at least include the addendum “Mine is world peace (so long as no one fucks with me). :)