The closest we will ever come to Morgan Freeman narrating a Fifty Shades of Grey novel

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As majestic and worldly as it might be, Morgan Freeman is never going to recite the text of E.L. James' fanfic-turned-housewife titillator Fifty Shades of Grey in front of people. However, some people can pretend to be Morgan Freeman to show us just how dramatically spanktastic this might be. Actor, comedian, and voice artist Josh Robert Thompson does a wicked Freeman impression (on par with Tom Kane, who does a similarly spot-on impersonation for Robot Chicken -- and Morgan Freeman himself), and has done the world a great service by reading an excerpt, as the Great Narrator, from the second book in the series, Fifty Shades Darker. So now Morgan Freeman doesn't have to!

But hey, where do I start the social media campaign to hold a Fake Morgan Freeman Narrate-Off between Thompson and Kane, refereed by Freeman? Can we make this happen?

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I love that so many of these faux-readings are coming from men, but seriously, can’t we get some awesome ladies reading this? I mean, the central narrator is a woman. Kathleen Turner? Judy Tenuta? Dr. Ruth?