Sheriff Joe held a press conference this evening to continue spouting off about his conspiracy theory, complete with a team of "experts" to verify his claims.

Lead investigator Mike Zullo explained that numeric codes on parts of the birth certificate mean that those sections were not originally filled out. He knows this because he asked the 95-year-old former state worker who signed the birth certificate, and 95-year-olds are known for having all their facts straight.

This witch hunt couldn't possibly have anything to do with Arpaio's failures, right?

The Arizona Democratic Party says in a statement that Arpaio's investigation is intended to draw attention away from problems within his own agency, such as hundreds of sex-crimes cases that the sheriff's office failed to adequately investigate over a three-year period.

It's a more eloquent response than that offered by George Lopez, who called Arpaio a "puto."

President Obama, who was born in Hawaii, has not responded to Arpaio's most recent allegations.