That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Have a great Monday people and whatever

you do, don’t forget to LAUGH IT UP! Peace, I am outta here, Eucman!

QUOTES OF THE DAY

‘If it weren’t for my lawyer, I’d still be in prison. It went a lot faster with two people digging.’ Joe Martin

A lawyer starts life giving $500 worth of law for $5 and ends giving $5 worth for $500.’ Benjamin H. Brewster

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. John Adams

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office. Aesop

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. LM Boyd

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. John Adams

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shovelling smoke. Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

G U A R A N T E D T O M A K E Y O U L A F F….

In a criminal justice system based on 12 individuals not smart enough to get out of jury duty, here is a jury of which to be proud. A defendant was on trial for murder. There was strong evidence indicating guilt, but there was no corpse. In the defence’s closing statement the lawyer, knowing that his client would probably be convicted, resorted to a trick.

‘Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have a surprise for you all, ‘the lawyer said as he looked at his watch. ‘Within one minute, the person presumed dead in this case will walk into this courtroom. ‘He looked toward the courtroom door. The jurors, somewhat stunned, all looked on eagerly. A minute passed. Nothing happened.

Finally the lawyer said, ‘Actually, I made up the previous statement. But you all looked on with anticipation. I, therefore, put it to you that you have a reasonable doubt in this case as to whether anyone was killed, and I insist that you return a verdict of not guilty.’

The jury, clearly confused, retired to deliberate. A few minutes later, the jury returned and pronounced a verdict of guilty.

‘But how?’ inquired the lawyer. ‘You must have had some doubt; I saw all of you stare at the door.’ The jury foreman replied, ‘Yes, we did look, but your client didn’t look he just stared straight ahead.’

Friday’s Movie Trivia of the day!‘ What movie is this quote from??? “Well, everyone else we’ve bumped into has died. Why should you be any different?”

Answer: The Mummy! Said by Jonathan while convincing Winston to fly them into the desert.

Monday Movie Trivia of the day! What movie is this quote from??? “I’m still here [jerk], I’ll always be here. You push me down and I’ll get back up again and again and again and again. I could beat you right here, right now but I don’t want to be better than you Rick, I don’t want to be better than anybody.”

Friday’s Quizzler is……….

Decipher the following rebus:

GOT

GOT

GOT

GOT

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

HEROES

ANSWER: Forgotten Heroes!

Four “got” ten “heroes”

Monday’s Quizzler is……….

When you curtail a word, you remove the last letter and still have a valid word. You will be given clues for the two words, longer word first.

Look for answers to today’s quizzlers in TUESDAYS Jokes, Quotes, Quizzlers & Teases! Like this newsletter? Want to receive it daily? Also if you are on the list and do not want to continue to receive this email and would like your name removed from this distribution list, please send an email to the Eucman at Eucstraman@hotmail.com. https://dailyjokesquotesquizzlersandteases.wordpress.com/