Serious Sam 3 PC hands-on: constant, awesome chaos

Serious Sam is the game Duke Nukem Forever should have been: fast, violent, …

I walked through a series of Egyptian buildings in one of the levels included in my preview build of Serious Sam 3, and everywhere I looked sat pieces of armor and rounds of ammunition. In this game, that's a very bad sign. Soon enemies began warping in and the gunfire began. My assault rifle ran out of bullets first. I switched to the shotgun, but that meant I had to get close to my targets. Waves upon waves of enemies crashed into the walls of fire I threw at them, but I was soon overwhelmed by their numbers and died before restarting at the last save point.

I played the game on normal, and it completely owned me. With each attempt I got slightly further, learning how the environment can best help me fight back against the overwhelming number of enemies. For instance, Sam can draw these enemies into tight corridors away from the wide-open spaces, allowing his rocket launcher to thin the herd. The game provides a constant state of chaos with a few fleeting moments of calm—and I loved everything minute of it.

There is more to this than you think

The first level starts on a much slower pace, and you're introduced to the game's violence by slamming the first few headless enemies with a sledgehammer. More arrive, and you have to dodge and strafe to avoid their shots. Then you're given a gun, and the screaming, kamikaze enemies begin streaming towards you. If they get too close, they blow themselves up, so not shooting them is a very efficient way of dying.

You're going to need a strong set of surround sound speakers to play this game effectively. These headless enemies come from every direction and the only way to keep them at bay is to listen to their screams to sense their direction, then blow them up before they get to you. Catch them when they're close to other bad guys, and you can take out great swaths of enemies with only a few bullets.

This becomes more complicated when the giant, lumbering mechs begin to attack with their rapid-fire lasers, so you'll always have to adapt.

Serious Sam 3

On the small chance that this isn't insane enough for you, the game also allows up to 16 players in the co-op mode. If you have a number of USB gamepads, you can also play with up to four players in splitscreen mode in either co-op or competitive play. There are no solid announced plans for a console version yet, because the team wanted to focus on the PC version. Fortunately, the game looks amazing, even considering the fact that the levels I have access to aren't finished. I don't know if I can sell this game hard enough; it does everything right.

There's not much story to spoil, at least not in the bits I've played, so I won't waste time talking about the characters or the dialog. The settings switch between wide-open areas where the bad guys can come from anywhere to tight corridors where the bad guys can come from anywhere. It's not just a matter of the game throwing a crazy amount of enemies at you that makes it unique, it's the fact that the game mixes up the enemies in such a brilliant way.

You need to pay attention to the traditional enemies with the guns, and they're easy to plan for. Then you hear the sounds of the galloping, skeletal monstrosities that lunge at you when they get close. While you're moving and firing in order to survive those two waves, you'll notice the screaming sounds of the kamikazes, so you'll have to make sure you're spinning around and taking them out before they get close. It's all quite stressful, and I found myself playing with bunched muscles and white knuckles. When the game saves your progress after each set piece, it's finally time to breathe out.

Did I mention that there is no cover system? And your health will not regenerate?

Fortunately, Sam can carry every gun in the game at the same time, so you can switch between them at will. How can he do this? Shut up, that's how.

This game is hard, but the sense of fun and the unending action and suspense are both commendable. This is the game Duke Nukem Forever should have been and, for now, we're just glad it's here.

Serious Sam 3: BFE is coming to the PC this summer. The developers have not announced what "BFE" stands for.