She checked out my left side, and then moved to my right. There she stopped. After a few minutes, she started to seem worried.

"That can't be right..."

Great. Just what everyone wants to hear when someone is looking at their insides.

"...I can't find your right kidney."

I swallowed hard. "Um, maybe it moved?"

"I'll check in a few other places.

5 minutes later, she found it.

"It's in your abdomen! See? Here is your heart valve. And right below it is your kidney."

I looked at the screen, and saw nothing but lumpy static.

"Here, let's look at the left side. That kidney is around back, where it's supposed to be. And your right one...here...it's supposed to be tucked below your liver. But it's not. It's in front, kind of twisted into a funny position."

I just...I had no idea what to say.

"I have no idea if it's functional. But really, you only need one to live. And you've never had any problems before?"

I shook my head.

"Good. Well, we'll refer you to a kidney specialist. It might be fully functional. Who knows? Anyway, that's it. I'll let you get dressed."

I was beyond weirded out. But also kind of excited.

See? Proof that I'm special.

It's good to know, that's for sure. A sharp pain in my abdomen- I would never think "Oh hey, maybe it's my kidney." I'd probably just grab a laxative, and then die.

Also, if one of my enemies tries to stab me in the kidney, they will miss by a good foot and a half.

7 comments:

I went in about 10 years ago for what they thought may be an appendectomy. When they got in there they removed a nearly 12' long cyst and never could find my appendix. The doctor said that evidently I never had one!!

I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, so I know about cysts and pain. (HUGS)

I was born with 2 hernias, one on each side. They found them when they went in for a laparoscopy to see if I had endometriosis (due to pain). I came out of surgery and heard, "YOu get to have MORE surgery!" Just what someone wants to hear!

Good luck with that traveling kidney! And nope - you're not the only one. Kidney issues run in my family. My grandmother was born with 4... albeit it they were little. She has also been hospitalized over 100 times for kidney stones {not fun}. I had surgery when I was four because the little tube between my kidneys and my bladder didn't operate properly (the door went both ways instead of one). I also get ovarian cysts, but they have always gone away for me so far... See, weirdo numero uno right here! That and my thumb is double jointed and does weird things... and both my bio kids inherited it!

Well, hi. I'm Helena. I grew up on a blueberry farm in Western Michigan. My days were spent reading on the beach in the summer, and reading in my bedroom under a quilt in the chilly Michigan winter. I moved out to Utah to go to school, and to get away from my family. You know, typical angsty teenager stuff. While out there, I met this guy named Kurt, who was also from Michigan. But we were just friends.

Flash forward 9 years. We got married, and then we moved to Pittsburgh so he could go to Dental School. What can I say, the guy likes teeth. Now we have a little girl, a baby boy, two little turtles, and a whole new adventure ahead of us. Welcome to my life.