How To Clean Your House Like A Boss

By Lisa Fromont - 01 Mar 2017

Is your house a mess? Are you tired of scrubbing and washing only to have someone clumsily spill wine on your freshly cleaned carpet? Is your housework experience as tragic as an infomercial? Well, not anymore! We at The Urban List understand that cleaning is awful, and we wanna help you out—but wait! There’s more! Read on and we’ll give you some tips on how to clean your house like a boss, for absolutely free!

We’re sorry you had to read that. But seriously, we all make housework too hard for ourselves, maybe because we were never taught it at school. Maybe because the idea of adulting feels like something that should happen in your 30’s. Whatever the reason, there are a few tricks of the cleaning trade that will make things a whole lot easier for you. Work and shop smarter and you’ll have that house as clean as a whistle in no time. Better living, everyone.

#1 Think Minimalistic

Your first step to cleaning like a boss is to declutter your house. Stop hoarding junk, it’s gathering dust and it just gives you more to clean. Food, clothes, stupid ornaments—bin them all. Grab two boxes, one for donation, one for the rubbish and work your way through every room. Or, if you want to get really serious, here’s how to Spark Joy the Marie Kondo way. The good thing about this is that once you’ve done it, you never have to do it again if you pinky promise not to buy any more crap.

#2 Start The Cycles

Once you’ve decluttered your space and therefore your soul, start the laundry and dishes cycles. Go through every room collecting every piece of dirty clothing and every dish, spoon or cup and pop them in the dishwasher or washing machine—make sure you get the right one. In an hour (give or take) you will have to put the newly cleaned things away, so you might as well do chores while you wait to do more chores. Start those engines!

#3 Clean Smart

Completely finish one room before you move onto the next one. Make sure you carry a bucket where you can put any items that don’t belong in that room. Clean from the top, down, people! Because, if you clean your floors then dust the shelves, you will have to clean the floors again. It’s a gravity thing. And, last but not least, make sure you tidy as you go. There’s no point in having sparkling floors if the cushions are everywhere.

#4 Have One – And Only One – Of Everything

Obviously stow away spare dishes and towels for when you have guests, but when you don’t, make them strictly off limits! Everyone in your house gets one plate, one bowl, one towel etc. Why, you ask? You will have no more clutter, and everything will have to be clean all the time or else you starve. It’s called tough love.

#5 Know Your Old Wives Tales

Mr. Muscle is a total hunk and it makes perfect sense that you’d want to check out his pecs on those yum-smelling cleaning products, but we urge you to resist. Do a lil research and you’ll find that 90%* of cleaning can be done super effectively (and cheaply) with such ingredients as vinegar, lemon, bleach, and baking soda.

*Made up statistic but that’s how serious we are.

#6 Get Organised

We’re talkin’ labels, compartments, draws—the works. If you know exactly where every single thing goes, you take the brainwork out of house work. Score! You can then focus on more important things like imagining witty comebacks you could’ve used when you had that argument with your sister last week (We all do that when we clean, right?).

#7 Cover Mess-Prone Surfaces

This one will save you sooo much time. For example, line the shelves of your fridge with dishwasher-able placemats, if you have any spillage, take the whole mat out and let the clean machine work its magic. Do this wherever you can in your house (got a messy make-up station?) and you will live a life of peace.

#8 Keep Cleaning Supplies In Every Room

Everywhere in your house needs to be cleaned, so have a cleaning-products hangout zone in each room. Divide full-sized cleaning products (including vinegar and co.) into smaller bottles, and keep them all together with a list of the rooms’ cleaning tasks—because no one likes having to put thought into cleaning.

#9 Set The Mood

If the idea of cleaning sends your mood darker than a moonless night, give yourself a little pep talk, put on some comfy clothes and turn that stereo up. There’s nothing quite like boogeying as you vacuum.

#10 Stay Focused

If your mind tends to wander here and there with any menial task, it’s far too easy to check that email or see what Sarah’s been up to on Facebook (OMG, she’s overseas AGAIN??) Just stop! Put that phone away and do not, we repeat, do not touch it until you’re done.

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By Lisa Fromont

Growing up in semi-rural South Auckland, Lisa’s passionate about all things outdoors. Festivals, road trips, beaches, bush-walks and sports top Lisa’s list of favourite things ever—preceded only by her absolute gem of a dog, and followed by Mexican and Japanese food.

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