Friday, June 22, 2012

BSNYC Friday Illegible Piece of Paper That You Found In Your Pants Pocket!

What is censorship?

Technically, this image is censored:

Yet is it not far more titillating than this image, which is technically not censored, and which in fact reduces the picture entirely to its forbidden elements?

The above illustration reveals something profound about perception, context, culture, marketing, and societal taboos, but it's Friday and I refuse to expend the mental effort to work out exactly what that is.

Speaking of mental effort, the world is apparently full of people who either refuse or are simply unable to expend any regardless of what day of the week it is. For example, the other day I mentioned an article about speed cameras in New York City, and recently I noticed the following comment:

Yes, I understand 30mph, I understand to stay out of a lane that is now a bike lane, I no longer can drive down Broadway into Times Square, I can not travel through Central Park to make up for time to get to the theater or a meeting. If New York has money for all these changes... How come more than 85 percent of the roads and bridges are in worst shape than ever! I get a ticket and pay for it... fix the roads and highways I recieved the citation on and DON'T take all decade to do so.

It's good to know the reason we still don't have a car-free Central Park is that douchebags don't want to be late to the theater. Complaining about how hard it is to get to the theater on time in your car is like complaining about how you're always late for your reservation at Le Bernardin because the city doesn't provide adequate mooring for your yacht. What is it with drivers complaining about being late, anyway? Sure, I realize they refuse to take any personal responsibility for running people over, but the least they could do is admit that they have poor time management skills.

Meanwhile, in Australia, things are getting increasingly sucky for cycling, and a number of readers inform met that the State Government of Victoria has now eliminated its bike infrastructure budget. This compelled riders in Melbourne to unfurl the Blue Ribbon of Shame outside the Parliament House:

And now, I'm pleased to present you with an quiz. As always, study the items, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll know, and if you're wrong you'll see something Australian, forwarded by a reader.

"I’ve biked dozens of American states and all over western Europe, and nowhere else have I encountered a cycling culture so cutthroat, vicious, reckless, hostile, and violently competitive as ________."

No surprise on the bonus question. You ever watch cycling youtube stuff from the UK? Some of the cyclists are camera toting vigilantes and the drivers are totally pissy too. Plus, their bike lanes look to be about two feet wide alot of the time.

Hi. This is Bobby Jonez, taCOMA, WA USofA, age 12 and severely over-hormoned. I was sitting in my room listening to Black Sabbath, 'turning japanese' and grooving on industrial strength cleaning product vapours when I happened upon the two recumbabe pictures. Being fhotoshop facile I combined the two and I have to say that for her age and road mileage recumbabe is utterly and totally recumable.

snob, i will never believe you when you say that you are barely employed and your blogging is not a real job...how in hell can you stand going through comments, which you sometimes do, on a post in bikeportland and not vomit your guts out?

would it be at all possible to commission a photo shoot with an actual hot chick in a recumbent? i say commission the photo because obviously no attractive person has even given consideration to riding one. I do appreciate the tingly titilizing feelings that arise from a properly censored photo, but i just wish you were censoring something worth looking at.

Maybe you could hold a contest whereby female fans of BSNYC submit their photo?

I'd have to think at least one attractive gal out there actually reads this crap.

oh yeah and they found the car with which the local cyclist was hit and runned upon last weekend. no word yet on the condition of the rider. this will be our second h/r prosecution in less than a year (smallville).

...Oh, says Red Molly to James, "That's a fine motorbikeA girl could feel special on any such like"Says James to Red Molly, "My hat's off to youIt's a Vincent Black Lightning, 1952"

And I've seen you at the corners and cafes it seemsRed hair and black leather, my favorite color schemeAnd he pulled her on behindAnd down to Box Hill, they did ride

Oh, says James to Red Molly, "Here's a ring for your right handBut I'll tell you in earnest I'm a dangerous manFor I've fought with the law since I was seventeenI robbed many a man to get my Vincent machine

Now I'm twenty-one years, I might make twenty-twoAnd I don't mind dying, but for the love of youAnd if fate should break my strideThen I'll give you my Vincent to ride"

Not sure if Lionel is actually caught in an ill-tempered race, or if everyone else is just quicker than her? In London you learn to ride with the pace of traffic if you don't fancy repeated close passes by bus/white van drivers.

Non-Londoners might like to know that before the cycle superhighway was put in (narrowing the area left for cars) the Embankment was essentially a highway with a very nominal 30 mph speed limit, so any idea of "wending" your way along it would have been suicide.

There's a certain type of London cyclist that hates the idea that normal office workers are cycling these days, instead of just bohemian writer types like herself. It's just intellectual hipsterism.

Anyone know of any bike safety or just intro to biking classes in Park slope/ Kensington? I'm looking for general riding tips and good lock selection I've chosen the best online but still keep having my bike stolen. Any good places in the area would help.

Update from Melbourne - Victorian State Government's ingenious attempt to make the whole "We aren't spending a dime on bicycling infrastructure this year despite what we said last year when Cadel won the Tour" go away.

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!