Category: Bizarre

For whatever reason, some Customers are just plain odd. And the service industry unleashes them on to unsuspecting clerks with often hilarious results. If you like your customers just plain bizarre, then read on!

Me: “No, madam. That is for 24 stamps. We only sell them in books of 12.”

Customer: “But I only want 14!”

Me: “We are not a post-office, madam. We only sell stamps in books of 6 first-class or 12 second-class. In order to get 14 stamps you will have to buy two books. Will you not be able to use the rest at a later date? If it’s a real problem there is a post office just around the corner which will be open in the morning.”

Customer: “No. I need 14 stamps”.

(This goes on for some time. She eventually twigs, and buys one book of 12 stamps. We saw her talking to a colleague of ours outside. It turns out she was setting off to walk three miles to drop off the other two cards so she didn’t need the postage! This was about three weeks before Christmas. Goodness knows why she couldn’t wait for the post office to open.)

(I work in a chocolatier. We’ve opened at midnight for our Black Friday sale. My job is to greet shoppers as they come in and offer everyone a sample. By 4 am I’m exhausted from the rush. A customer comes in. He is red faced, and wearing a shirt several sizes too small.)

(I am working on a till in the run-up to Christmas. I’m 20, but I look a bit younger. A customer and I have been chatting about her plans for the day ahead.)

Customer: “Do you work here full-time?”

Me: “No. I’m actually only on contract for eight hours per week, but I’m doing about thirty at the moment, with Christmas coming up.”

Customer: “Oh. I don’t know about all that. I say to my children, they’re about your age, I think you’re old enough to know by now—” *drops into a stage whisper* “—there’s no Father Christmas. Thank you. Have a nice day!”