Most of you are probably not aware that I live in a subtropical climate. It's always hot here and we don't really have a winter the same way most regions do. We have insane humidity and no dry season. You can't even buy a winter coat down here, though maybe you could get a fur coat from that posh place downtown, I dunno. It was 80 degrees in November while people a few states north were experiencing record-breaking snow fall. So basically, it's fucking hot here. Not cold.

Which is why I am totally unprepared for motherfucking SNOW. Although it may actually be sleet - whatever, my car was covered in piles of ice this morning. That's all that matters. I live in flip flops. My heaviest jacket is a fleece pull over from Old Navy - you know the one I'm talking about, you all have one, too. I can't handle this weather. And it's only going to get worse, says the weather app on my phone (which you know can always be trusted).

I feel like we're going to end up cannibalizing each other's frozen bodies before the weekend is over. I'm going to keep and eye out for my neighbors... I'm not sure if the fat guy will last longer than the skinny guy, but whichever dies from hypothermia first is gonna be dinner.