Both hands on the wheel

Area working moms intent on navigating job, caring for kids

Area working moms intent on navigating job, caring for kids

October 03, 2006|CHRISTINE COX Tribune Staff Writer

Last week, with the grass-roots backing of 55,000 working mothers and their supporters, the group MomsRising.org showed the film "The Motherhood Manifesto" to U.S. senators on Capitol Hill. Based on a book by the same name, "The Motherhood Manifesto" highlights the problems that still exist for working mothers and calls for action to correct them.

(For example, a Cornell University study shows not only are working moms paid less than childless women and men, they're more likely to be rejected for employment.)

To help gain support for a six-point agenda that includes paid parental leave, flextime and quality child care, MomsRising.org is sending the movie out to individuals for $10, encouraging them to watch it in groups.

"The Motherhood Manifesto" is not the only call to action for working moms. It's not even the only manifesto connected to working mothers published this year.

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Lawyer Linda Hirshman's controversial "Get to Work: A Manifesto for Women of the World" has stirred the decades-old debate of whether women should work outside the home. Hirshman expertly argues the glass ceiling will never be shattered unless all women are at work, equally taking their places beside men. And "the thickest ceiling is at home." She's received vehement opposition from stay-at-homemothers and from those who call her elitist, as her argument extends primarily to women with advanced degrees. (In fairness, anti-feminist author Caitlin Flanagan's "To Hell With All That: Loving and Loathing Our Inner Housewife" argues the opposite point of view to just as much criticism.)

But "This is How We Do It: The Working Mothers' Manifesto" by Carol Evans stays away from the "Mommy Wars" to the relief of many. Instead, the president and chief executive officer of Working Mother magazine reminds working mothers of how far they've come and how successful they've been in making their voices heard, and gives them advice for effectively asking for such changes as higher wages and flextime. Evans says when moms ask for change, 74 percent of the time the requests are granted.

Where do we go from here? There's no consensus among area working mothers, either.

And, perhaps because of her own exceptional social net, Slamin says single parenthood is actually easier than what she'd expected.

Slamin, mother of 20-month-old daughter, Sophia Wordinger, currently lives with her parents, turns to friends for emotional support, and works full time for an understanding boss in her job as a project manager for a local construction company.

"My boss is great and said, 'Whatever you need to do, you need to do,' " Slamin says of her pregnancy. Even though her employer wasn't legally required to give her the 12 unpaid weeks established by the federal Family Medical Leave Act because of the firm's small size, he gave them to her anyway.

And "He was very understanding when I had to go to doctor's appointments," she says. Now, "He's very flexible as long as I get my work done." She determines whether to work weekends or nights.

"I just can't imagine being in a situation where you have to work 9 to 5," she says. "Even if you don't have a child, there are just things you can't do on evenings and weekends."

But offering that flexibility should be left up to the individual business, she says.

"It's great on one hand that other countries do it," she says of family-friendly policies that she can see could pay off in the long run. "I just don't think government should have those regulations."

It would be nice

Kelly Taddeo, 28, of South Bend, operates with determination and energy whether she's taking care of her son, Jacob, 3 1/2, or working her job as a physical therapy assistant for Saint Joseph Regional Medical Center in South Bend.

During her pregnancy, she'd hoped to find a way to stay home at least part time. But, "financially with the way things are, I had no choice but to go back to work full time," she says. "I don't think I'd ever want to give up my job completely, because I love what I do, but I'd love to stay home part time with him. They're only little once."

She and her husband John aren't struggling, but they're careful about staying on top of their finances.

Like Slamin, Taddeo is grateful for the family-friendly benefits of her job, especially the partially paid maternity leave through short-term disability, and the flexibility to take early lunch breaks two days a week to shuttle Jacob from day care to speech class.

But, she's more grateful for the benefits she has instead of focusing on more.

"I'd love to see a change in the reimbursement for day care on taxes," she says. "We pay $4,500 a year for full-time day care for him, and we can claim $600 or $1,000 on taxes."

And, "It would be nice if we could have longer maternity leaves," she says.