Japan Comes Back To Beat Pennsylvania 18-11

SOUTH WILLIAMSPORT, Pa. — With more than 42,000 fans cheering against them, the Tokyo players found themselves down eight runs in the first inning of the Little League World Series championship game against Lewisberry, Pennsylvania.

That brought out manager Junji Hidaka’s inner Yogi Berra and sparked a record rally that saw the Kitasuna Little League pound out 22 hits in an 18-11 comeback victory in a battle of undefeated teams.

One team. That’s all I’m asking for. One of my teams to win something. The Phillies season is a tire fire, the Sixers are going to suck out loud again this season, and the Birds have literally never won a goddamn Super Bowl. The universe could have thrown me a bone here and given me a Pennsylvania championship belt that would have perked me up a bit but ultimately doesn’t count. But instead the Japs came back from an 8 runs lead and dropped an 18 run A-bomb on Williamsport. Devastating stuff.

I’m embarrassed to admit this but I thought that the LLWS was a double elimination tournament and thought this would be a best of 3 series. This doubled my disappointment and really put a kibosh on this Pearl Harbor->Nagasaki->Hiroshima: Game 1->Game 2->Game comparison I had cooked up. But when you’re beat your beat so I guess I have to tip my cap to the boys from the Land of the Rising Tentacle Porn. Here’s a tribute in the form of a borderline offensive song from the 80’s.