I leaned back with my feet up on my desk. I read my name backwards on the door and wondered. Like a bad joke told to a brown-shoed square in the dead of night, it all came rushing back to me. I thought carefully about getting up from my desk, putting on my new Velarimosa prawn hat, opening the door to the hallway, checking the spelling on my name one more time, closing the door behind me, making my way down the evening street full of worn gastritis, continuing to a dark doorway, the length of which would lead me to a knuckle-worn bar top of mildew and pine, mounting a bow-legged stool and ordering a pint of the nectaral Maximus Ale. And then I did.

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Virtual Taste: Maximus

Originally made in 1996 (and continuously). Once beer drinkers came around to the hop profile of the IPA, we decided to kick it up a notch and ramped up the recipe for our IPA using the same ingredients, but more of 'em. Lots more.

It’s not important for us to know exactly how you arrived here, but it is important for both of us to acknowledge that you ARE here… Acceptance is always the first step.

Many souls have arrived here at the end of arduous and sometimes difficult journeys and we want you to know that you are welcomed and that we will always be here for you. Your complimentary blanket and bowl of soup will be along in a moment.

So, it is in a genuine spirit of mindful compassion that we will share this time. You are good, you are beautiful, and you are a sentient being on the planet Earth. You may or you may not have lint in your navel.

Therefore make peace with your God, whatever you conceive him to be; Cosmic Muffin or Hairy Thunderer, and take solace in the knowledge that your dog is finally getting enough bacon.