Principles for Relationships from God's Word by Claudio Consuegra

Happy perfectionists – 1

I am the LORD, and there is no other; There is no God besides Me. I will gird you, though you have not known Me, Isaiah 45:5 (NKJV)

You might think that a perfectionist would automatically be more successful; however, recent research suggests that isn’t always the case. In fact, many people who are hard-wired for perfection often sabotage themselves. Wanting to be perfect is almost like a compulsion which may be counterproductive. For instance, for some perfectionists, the drive to be perfect causes them to stall when faced with an important task. Procrastination helps them cope with a fear of failure. On the other hand, perfectionism forces others to do too much, resulting in OCD-like behaviors.

Perfectionists have a hard time accepting the fact that no one can manage to be perfect, which is one of the reasons that a perfectionist is so often disappointed. While perfectionism exists as a personality trait and not a disorder, it may lead to mental health problems, such as anxiety. For many, because expectations are so high, goals often go unmet which explains why many perfectionists suffer from low self-esteem.

Unfortunately, perfectionism is not only frustrating for the perfectionist. Because it is linked with workaholisim and exhaustion, it is also exhausting for people who are around them. So what’s a perfectionist to do to be happy and healthy? While some extreme cases may require professional help, Meghan Holohan[i], from TODAY, provides several tips from experts for anyone whose drive for excellence has become a stumbling block.

Be compassionate to yourself. You may be so busy criticizing yourself that you don’t realize you need to be kind to yourself. Keep in mind that you’re only human, everyone makes mistakes, and only God is perfect. The one area where we should strive for perfection is in our character. The way to do that is to “dwell upon the perfection of Christ, and as we behold his matchless charms, we shall desire to be like him, and become changed, reflecting more and more of his spirit of love.”[ii]

Father God, help me to realize that I don’t have to do everything perfectly all the time, but you do help me to be perfect like Christ.