Thursday, 22 January 2009

Sexist

Look, I know I go on and on about radio advertising in Dubai. But this is really too much.

Man: (sings) Happy anniversary to you!Woman: Thank you honey!Man: Now, close your eyes! I have a surprise for you. Woman: OK!Man: Open your eyes! You wanted a new refrigerator and washing machine. Here they are!Woman: Wow! A new LG steam washing machine and a side by side refrigerator. Can we afford both?Man: Of course! Exchange any old washing machine or refrigerator and bring a new LG washing machine or refrigerator. As part as part of their five year leadership celebration, LG is offering three exciting rewards. We also get an extended warranty on LG home appliances. Woman: Wow!Man: Plus we get free one year's supply of detergent powder for washing machine and a microwave oven for the fridgeWoman: Fantastic! Honey, this is the best anniversary ever!Man: Add magic to your festivities with LG's exchange offer! Pre-register by calling blblabla. Conditions apply. LG. Caring for you in every way.

I shall refrain from adding any comment beyond noting that the woman sounds like a helium breathing chipmunk on speed and the man is excruciatingly wooden. There are no typos, this is an accurate transcription apart from the word 'steam' which I can't quite make out but which sounds like steam.

The delivery is so excrutiatingly bad that I'm convinced the readers, the man in particular, are actually protesting at the inane script they've been given.

I was going to post about DEWA's nonsensical radio ads at some stage. The ones about 'behind your tap is a story' and explaining to an astonished world that it's...(drum roll)....water. There's another about electricity too.

I never get the nonsense on tape to transcribe it...as you're so good at it maybe you could as part of your series reviewing the creative excellence of our writers, creative directors and actors.

But I couldn't help but like the RTA's radio campaign involving speeding and black points which aired late last year..... "You're going too fast Ahmed.... slow down habibi etc etc.... you'll lose your licence etc etc....."

The 'steam' bit is (I think) the new technology in washing machines - sort've a cross between water conservation & dry cleaning without really smelly chemicals.I gave up listening to the radio because the music was crap & I always managed to catch a DJ who either had a speech defect or was simply bloody annoying. Having said that, I have an LG store just around the corner & thanks to their ad in the window, am now rather tempted to treat myself to a few new appliances :-)

I don't think it's sexist. My wife works and does the laundry. She would certainly not be excited about a fridge for her anniversary, but I'm sure she would appreciate it. Hell, I would.

In fact, had it been my anniversary and my wife went out and bought us a new fridge (not sure I care for the washing machine), I would call it the best anniversary gift ever :)You know, I've always wanted to have one of those fridges that comes with an ice-maker.

In all seriousness though, it was just another crappy radio advert. Not any worse than the rest of it.

The thing that worries me is that more and more these days I'm unable to see quite how bad these ads have become. The issue comes down to an issue of laziness and lack of creativity in Dubai. 2 issues that I believe will be a major problem for Dubai in the coming years.Have a look at my blog on dubai and other stuff to come.http://jacquesrenault.wordpress.com/

Who writes the excruciating advert scripts? There's one about the Government Bonds that has some bloke saying that he knows where he's "...putting his money henceforth!"

Only a few people and goats write like that; no-one ever speaks in that way in Real Life. (E&OE)

The worst advert ever has got to be the one with a strapped-for-cash mother agreeing to buy a doll's house and a 'coool' bike, take her offspring to the water park and eat out, but only after their father has 'sent the money.'

It's dreadful, and fails as an advert because I can remember every minute detail except for the product being advertised.

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I write books, I consult on publishing, media and digital communications, I cook. I spend quite a lot of my time laughing and do try not to be a stick-waving, spittle-flecked angry old man. I fail in this occasionally.