Seriously, aside from stealing a presidential election (maybe 2), lying about WMDs in order to start a war, revealing the identity of a covert federal agent as a means of political payback, trying to suppress voter turnout in key Democratic regions, countless bribery offenses, and the occasional cheating on taxes, what proof do we have that the Republican Party is capable of such nefarious behavior?

It's a handkerchief, but there are notes written in Braille sewn into it in white thread. Check this out though, the notes all say "Don't use the N-word" and "'Middle class,' not 'you people.'" I ran it through the GCMS, and there are traces of jet fuel--and not just any jet fuel, but J460-6, which as we all know is only used to fuel private jets in the Cayman Islands. Also, a booger.

For everyone arguing that the the hanky was too bulky, obviously you don't know what 4,000 threadcount Armani custom hankerchief, made with Burmese albino spider silk cleansed in the tears of children orphaned by parents who died because they lost their health care due to their jobs being outsourced by Bain Capital, weighs.

We also did this shiat years ago with the Bush "earpiece" thing. Fark around

Interestingly enough, I more or less recieved indirect confimation that it was SOP for Bush and Rove to do an earpiece and microphone thing at most major speeches Bush gave. I knew a guy who is a "rigger" in Downtown DC and sets up lights/sound etc for most press conferences and televised speeches downtown. He told me flat out that the POTUS and his crew alway brought their own Camera that faced the crowd and fed to a montor Karl rove Watched and that he'd radio speech updates/alterations to Bush on the fly based on the crowd's reaction to what the president was saying

mrshowrules:I was with a guy named Jimmy John. I've met Jimmy John. Jimmy John, hope I get the story entirely right, I think I will, he graduated from high school, and he didn't want to go to college. And he said to his Dad can I borrow some money I want to start ...

Mr. Showrules, I knew Jimmy John. Jimmy John was a friend of mine. You, Mr. Showrules, are no Jimmy John.

Invisible Obama:Lando Lincoln: SideshowRaheem: You know how you feel when conservative sites put forward something so ridiculous that you can't believe people far for it? Yeah, this is the liberal version of that.

badaboom:chatikh: I don't understand why all the media is saying Romney won the debate. He made lots and lots of claims, but I didn't believe any of it because he couldn't answer the simple question, "How?" Saying you can magically fix the economy but not answering how you're going to magically fix the economy isn't winning. Because I really think he either doesn't know how or he is completely lying about it.

As opposed to what Obama said? What did Obama say that impressed you?

Obama's performance wasn't impressive. In his attempt to remain mostly on the side of fact he couldn't quite compete with the bullshiat explosion coming from Romney. Maybe he should have guaranteed that he'd pay off every mortgage in the US, have a military base on Mars, and cure cancer by 2014 if elected. With that immense level of BS he'd have won the debate for sure!

badaboom:chatikh: I don't understand why all the media is saying Romney won the debate. He made lots and lots of claims, but I didn't believe any of it because he couldn't answer the simple question, "How?" Saying you can magically fix the economy but not answering how you're going to magically fix the economy isn't winning. Because I really think he either doesn't know how or he is completely lying about it.

As opposed to what Obama said? What did Obama say that impressed you?

I was impressed when Romney said that the oil subsidies have been going on for 100 years and Obama cut in with "that's long enough, time to end it" something like that. When Obama summarized Romney's unexpected platform change as "nevermind". Or how about when Obama summarized how disconnect Romney was from the plight of students when he suggest that they could just borrow money from their parents. Or how about challenging the moderator on the term "entitlements" like it made people sound like leeches. You put the debate on paper and Obama kicked ass. Turn the sound off and Romney wins hands down.

Oh, sorry I must have missed the Republicans running around crying about paranoid delusional conspiracies trying to make up for the fact that their candidate had his a-- royally handed to him in front of millions across this globe.

/// back to your teleprompter fool.

Yes, if our standards for a debate win are taken from Idiocracy, then Obama got his "ass royally handed to him".

Romney (inhaling deeply from his hanky): "Ah yes, and then there are the death panels. I only want to kill Big Bird. The President wants to kill your grandmother!" "Five trillion what?! Don't you farking look at me!"

Beanlet:PsiChick: No, I just don't find it utterly ridiculous that, yeah, the guy who's hardly MENSA material might need notes and have a handkerchief in his pocket. And while I'm obviously not familiar with the gesturing patterns of white rich males, it's not like putting your handkerchief on the debate table is a universal.

But like I said, I really don't give a flying shiat, so it's a lot easier for me to say 'well, damn, that don't look good'.

imagine this.. Romney is a sweaty old perv.. he needs the handkerchief to keep his palms and forehead from dripping sweat when he's nervous. The bulging eyes, which got redder and redder as the night went on, aren't the only outsider indicator that he was nervous. He wiped his face a few times. I will be honest and admit that I have sweaty palms (I may be old and I may be a perv, too). I keep a tissue in my hand before I am going to shake someone's hand so I don't gross them out. I toss it into the other hand or my pocket in the last moments before I am to shake the hand. He may not have been shaking hands at the podium, but he was definitely sweating up a storm, his upper lip and brow were damp, so I assume his palms were sweaty too. It would be better to have that kerchief on the podium, rather than looking like he was playing pocket pool every time he went for said kerchief.

If he had notes, he sucks at reading them, since he tossed out numbers that we all know aren't correct. He'd have gotten his "zingers" correct, too.. the "you can have your own house, your own plane, but not your own facts" wasn't something he'd have written down, since it applied directly to HIM, not Obama. Most of his "zingers" were like that.. they seemed like he was taunting himself. I'd like to think that's why Obama was looking down at his notes, thinking "wow, this guy has no clue what he's talking about and I am supposed to response with.. what??"

I dislike Romney as much as the next guy/girl.. but making a big deal out of a handkercheif ...

He had to do a complete 180 on his positions, and it's not like there's a law saying he can ONLY have a handkerchief OR a notecard.

Again: I really don't give a shiat, the guy was outright lying in the debate. This just amuses me. Either he cheated, or he looked like he was cheating.

i'm surprised at how many of you are thinking about this so linearly. why couldn't he have thrown both his notes AND a handkerchief on the table? then he's got his notes to read and a handkerchief to cover them up/use to make it seem normal. or he could've just written the notes onto the handkerchief itself. it's like you guys have never cheated in school before.

I agree that the debate was pretty weird.One guy has questionable facts and ethicsThe other guy stood there like he found a dick in his pocket that wasn't his.

It was the first of three debates.It's only a debate.

Nothing changed for me, I'm still voting. These dog and pony shows for the illiterate? They're only handy if you aren't the president and have no record in international anything.Well, except for stepping on your dick when you're in England.

Has no idea why I wasted that hour watching what amounts to a controlled burn.

FormlessOne:CynicalLA: Obama look tired and the body language was horrible for a debate. This article seems a little desperate.

And here's why folks didn't care about the fact that Romney managed to whip out 28 lies in 34 minutes. "Sure, he's a lying used car salesman, but damn, didn't he look better than the other guy? Yeah! Let's vote for him!"

This is how Dubya got into office, too. Gore may have been wooden when debating Bush, but he was also correct - and in America, "correct" doesn't matter anywhere near as much as "photogenic." Bush handily won debates because he looked better, not because he knew what the hell he was talking about on just about any subject.

This very rationalization is why the media is giving the debate to Romney - it's not a "debate", it's a friggin' catwalk. Romney looked better than Obama on the catwalk - he lied, he dissembled, and he was clueless, but he looked better and that, apparently, was all that mattered.

The moderator wasn't fair! Romney was lying! Romney isn't behaving like he's suppose to behave! Romney cheated! Obama hadn't had time to adjust to the change in altitude! Please, for our own sanity we need some excuse or reason conservative ideas were presented on stage and stomped liberal ideas flat.

But get back to talking about what a bunch of crazy, desperate, and deranged people the "Freepers" are.

alphalemming:One man on the stage was looking down at his podium all night. It wasn't Romney.

This isn't a "gotcha" for the left, it's a pathetic reach that only resounds in the echo chamber. Obama clearly didn't bring his A game and will bring it next time because his second term is riding on it.

Pichu0102:This bears repeating. Having pre-made notes during a debate strikes me as good preparation, especially since you have to still work within a changing debate.

The point is you shouldn't need notes, it's a chance to demonstrate clear mastery of the material. It's amazingly telling when someone does not know without notes, I'll give you two examples:

Stephen Colbert asked a politician who was advocating putting the 10 commandments in courthouses because they are so important "name the 10 commandments." When he didn't know, it was amazingly telling exactly how important he really thought they were.

Another example is in discussing the minimum wage, many Republicans have advocated there is no need to raise the minimum wage. So when asked "what is the minimum wage" it became amazingly clear they had no idea.

In both of these cases, failure to be able to recite basic facts off the top of their head was incredibly relevant.

cameroncrazy1984:lennavan: cameroncrazy1984: lennavan: No, subby I did not notice that because I saw Romney take notes many times. But even if the way you totally imagined the debate went were true, I fail to see how a handkerchief explains it.

Why would Romney put a handkerchief on the podium? Why not just keep it in his pocket? Is he expecting some sort of snot-emergency wherein he'll need to save time?

Holy fark who cares why he put it on a podium versus kept it in his pocket. Do you? Are you seriously concerned about the location of Mitt Romney's handkerchief?

You don't think it's seriously weird that Romney put a handkerchief on the podium before the debate? Who does that?

OH SH*T it's part of his programming!

You know what, I'm not up on the current ettiquite for handling of your own handkerchief, what is socially acceptable and what is seriously weird and all. You know why? Because I could give a flying fark. Apparently this is an important part of your day, keeping up on what is acceptable use and location of your handkerchief.

But let me entertain your line of derp for a moment and pretend like this is the most pressing and important issue and line of attack on Romney - Mitt Romney puts his handkerchief on the podium before the debate. So that's one person who does it. Now here's my question - who DOESN'T put their handkerchief on the podium before the debate?

Right now, I've got 1 person who puts a handkerchief on the podium before the debate and you've got zero people who do not. I await your incredibly informed response because I know this is a pressing issue for you.

You gotta love the left's flailing around trying to figure out why Fartbongo got his ass kicked. It's simple. He hasn't had to face anybody tough in years. He got soft, he lost his edge. He became complacent. He's been told he's the greatest thing for so long that he began to believe that he was the best there is. And then holy shiat what the hell is this a tough SOB?

It reminded me of the pigs from Demolition Man: "We're police officers! We're not trained to handle this kind of violence! "

Maybe next time he'll prep for the debate. I'm not sure why though, anybody who's not faking it at their job can talk shop at the drop of a hat.