Sept 30, 2011, my estranged husband shot me four times. He also took the lives of my loving parents, Kennie & Retha Rodgers. My life was forever changed by the decision he made, but the last of his victims I would be. The series of events that led up to that morning that God spared my life were a chapter I lived . . .survived . . . and the scars I look at as beauty now, a reminder. I’ve had to date nine surgeries to correct gunshot wounds to my face and jaw, as well as leg and chest.

Four years later, I am living through the eyes of my 5 year old daughter, for God saved my life . . .

Causes that hit close to home are the hardest to advocate. That’s my experience, anyway.

Donating even $10 causes me to feel, ironically, less sensitive to a remote situation, because my donation functioned as an assertion of control. In my mind, the pennies tossed toward purchasing a comfortable park bench somehow eases the consequences of global warming, let alone the needs of children in Africa. It’s as if my conscience puts on sunglasses and props up her feet while a perfectly irrational degree of selfishness takes over. I’ve done my piece, world. So there.

But some causes hit so close to home that they are impossible to ignore. And no matter where you reside in the US, the issues of domestic violence and sexual abuse literally—yes, literally—do.

Do you have a teenaged daughter? Precious preteen niece, neighbor, or nephew? Some of the cruelest crimes never make the news. 1 in 7 girls are sexually abused by age 18, and 1 in 5 by the time they reach 25.

Here is a hard question: What are you personally doing to change that statistic?

Furthermore, if your answer is nothing: what makes you the least bit confident that your beautiful children will never be abused?

The Little Black Dress Society strives to help survivors of sexual abuse and domestic violence in every way possible. But today’s post is not about the organization. It’s about the tragic pervasiveness of the cause.

If you’re hoping for an internet-induced dopamine rush, look elsewhere. This content is heavy. Read onward for 35 hard, cold, haunting facts about sexual abuse and domestic violence in America.

1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have already experienced sexual violence and/or stalking in their lifetime.

In the News: When I read these stories of young college men and NFL players who turn to violence against women and still get to play football I ask, “at the expense of what?” Fans will still pay big bucks for tickets to a game to support their favorite team whose players make more money than they know what to do with; college students will rally around their players sporting their colors; and donors will keep paying huge amounts of money to their Alma-mater to see their team rise to the top. But, what about the women who have been beaten, shamed by the actions of these men who have no respect for a woman? While their abuser continues to get cheered on these women hide behind the mask of shame that follows abuse. Who stands up for them? Who claps for them? They aren’t cheered on. In most cases no one knows their name or if they do, how easily they forget it. No, these women who have been assaulted, whose very being has been shamed and insulted become statistics. They become the one in four women who have been or will be abused in their lifetime!

If the NFL and the colleges and universities remove these men from the team, take away their scholarships, then maybe it will make an impact. And if we as a society stop brushing these incidents under a rug as if they never happened and rise up for the women that have been assaulted then perhaps we can make a difference.

I love college football! But I’m tired of hearing these stories! Women’s lives matter more than a game of football! Wake up people! Oh and by the way, Bob Stoops and NFL coaches, how about wearing a purple ribbon this year on your hat?