Truth #4 – We want one of each

After I had my second daughter people congratulated me just the same. I know they were genuinely happy for me because after all, I had two perfectly healthy and thriving baby girls. As a mother, that’s all you could ever hope for. So why did so many people feel the need to ask me : “Are you gonna try for a boy?” At least wait a minute no? I just pushed out a human for *&% sakes! I’m still super fat, exhausted and shockingly I guess, really thankful and proud to have given birth to yet another healthy baby girl!

Here is my secret Mother Truth: I wanted a bunch of boys my whole life. I made the mistake of saying it out loud because those who knew my secret assumed I was disappointed. Are you kidding me?! After nine long months of daily paranoia and prayer, all you want is for whatever it is to get the hell out and be able to breathe on its own.

It would have been nice to have one of each. Why? Well, for a few reasons… I would love to see my husband with a son to see if he would parent any differently. I only have a brother and we’re really tight so I would have liked for my girls to have a boy around. I love being a mom to daughters so much that I would have liked to also be a mom to a son. And finally, I wish I didn’t feel like I disappointed anyone. It would have been nice for people to say congratulations and shut up!

If my husband and I decide to try again one day, it will be because we want another healthy baby rather than because we’re hoping for a boy. Here’s a piece of advice for those of you out there who feel the need to ask, “are you gonna try for a boy?” or “are you gonna try for a girl?”. Stop right there! Idiots! Odds are the brand new glowing and super blessed parents are enjoying their fantastic new creation. It’s highly doubtful that they’re hoping it turned out differently but if they are, secretly in their heart of hearts, they’re only human because it really would have been nice to have one of each.

Congratulations Nat!!! This is truly amazing!! Your blogs had me laughing out loud at points and with tears at others – simply because everything you have written is completely true! All of us young mothers feel these things – the difference is many of us are too scared to say them out loud or admit that we are thinking them!! You are truly a talented writer Nat and I look forward to reading your entries! Congrats again honey – lots of love and all the best!!! xoxo

Again , I share the same thoughts as you Nat!!! I have 2 little girls and love them dearly, they are healthy and beautiful and that’s what’s most important. I had c-sections with my girls and after Sophia (my second) I was asked when I was going to try for a boy?? Are you kidding me!! My f%^#ing stomach is stapled shut and you wanna ask me when I’m trying for a boy!!!!
I just had a healthy baby isn’t that enough??? why are we always being asked what are next move is??? You have your first, they wanna know when the second is coming?? is it boy or girl? what are you naming it?? are you having any more??? and on and on I feel like I’m being interviewed by a bunch of Barbara Walters Clones!

Nat,
I Love your blogs, they are so true!! I am pregnant for the 3rd time and if you thought what people said was inappropriate about you having a 2nd little girl, it’s even worse when you have a 3rd boy (like me). People act as if someone has passed away…”ahhhhh, are you o.k??”, “I really was hoping you would have had a little girl this time” or the best “I’m sorry”…REALLY!!!??? Like you, I had said that it would be nice to have a little girl, but as long as the baby was healthy I didn’t care the sex of the baby. People are crazy!! LOL
I look forward to reading more!!!