She’s Touchy-Feely

crazy men and touchy fingers

But you shouldn’t have criticized Shana for touching guys (though we’ll get into her “touchiness” more a little later). You should have told her that you were concerned for her security. When you’re trying to sell something to someone, dude, you don’t tell them that it’s a benefit to you — you pitch the benefit to them. Like my cousin Sal “The Fish” Love says, “How did you get rich, man?”

Here’s what you should have said: “Honey, one day you’re going to touch somebody and the guy’s going to turn out to be a loon. You’ve seen American Justice and City Confidential; you know what kinds of wackos are running around out there. And that’s what I worry about — you’re just a little too friendly with strangers.”

shana admits to no faults

Did you notice that Shana didn’t tell you that she was wrong when you pointed out her touchy behavior? It means she’s structured, guy. Like my cousin Rabbi Love says, “Son, beware of the woman who can’t admit her errors.”

Clem, we don’t want Shana to “work” on anything. We want her to say, “I’m so glad you’re concerned about my welfare and safety.” Think about it: When she’s walking your 4-year-old daughter around the mall and some goof is acting nuts, is Shana going to be talking to strangers then? Is she going to hug the guy because he tells her she looks nice?

But you’ve seen changes in Shana since you two talked. That’s good; at least she’s listening. As long as there’s some improvement in her behavior, you’re moving in the right direction. Remember — emphasize her SECURITY.

she flirts with her past relationships

So this girl has loads of ex-boyfriends. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love says, “Does that mean Shana and I shot a few games of pool somewhere one night?” I want to say something to all you girls out there: When you meet a guy, please don’t have any contact with anybody you ever went out with in the past.

I’m sure this stewardess is the super-friendly type, but there’s no reason for her to stay close to the families of her exes, because those boyfriends are gone — or they should be gone.

I see that you’re playing James Bond on Shana by snooping on her e-mails. Beautiful. It proves that you’ve read the Dating Dictionary at least once. And like my cousin General Love says, “All’s fair in love and war.”

shana has red flags on the tarmac

But the fact that she has a new boyfriend with whom she’s allegedly madly in love with — YOU — and doesn’t mention him is a huge RED FLAG. And let’s face it, buddy, these other guys aren’t talking about their new girlfriends or you because they still want Shana. To you Psych majors: The ex-boyfriends are dying to get back with her.

So you’re concerned about her flying all over the globe and touching all those foreigners? Like the great Doctor Freud once said, “I could answer your question about what she’s doing when you’re not there, but you’d probably commit suicide.”

That said, I do think that you’re being too hard on Shana. The Reality Factor says that in every deal there’s going to be something you don’t like and in your deal, you have a “touchy-feely” girlfriend on your hands. In your case, the fact that she drapes herself all over every guy she meets is the downside, but considering the fact that she has everything else going for her, I’d learn to overlook it if I were you.

get on board or catch another flight

In the end, you have to figure out how you’re built before you move on, Clem. Is Shana’s touchy nature a “deal-killer”? Only you can answer that question. If this habit of hers is going to irritate the hell out of you, you better give it lots of thought, because she’s going to be touching guys for the next 40 years.

Remember, guys: It’s tough to love a girl who can’t keep her hands off other men.

To hear my LOVE RADIO SHOW, send me your love questions or to find out more about “The System,”visit me at www.doclove.com or call (800) 404-2644. For the past 30 years Doc Love has asked thousands of women, “Why do you stay with one man versus another?”