You know it is the worst day of the year when someone you care about died.
It just had to be my cat. The only cat I have left.

It's not like I have tens of cats anymore.

I never really grasped the concept of death. To me, death is something unreal like a nightmare.
It is probably one of the reasons why I can't be a doctor. I never seem to understand death.

I mean how can you move on when someone you expect to be there isn't there anymore.

Like when I woke up this morning, I thought yesterday was just a horrifying nightmare.
But it wasn't meant to be like that.
My cat is still gone and I'm still here.

I have been dealing with dead pets for years but this one was the worst.
I was too numb and shocked to even handle the corpse.
Usually, I would be the one who took care of those dead pets but I couldn't think or do anything yesterday.

It was the worst feeling I had in months.
I knew the cat was going to die at some point or another, I just didn't expect it to be so soon.

I didn't get to touch or pet Tiger this week.

I didn't even heard or saw Tiger this week.

One of the things I missed while in Banting for the first few weeks was Tiger.
Never knew I am going to miss her even while I'm back home.

Geez.
I get so teary-eyed over a dead pet but I didn't even shed a tear when my grandfather passed away back when I was a kid.

Obviously I was a heartless kid and just grow a heart.

Someone once said, "People say you don't know what you have got until it's gone. Truth is, you knew what you had, you just thought you'd never lose it."