Learn Yourself Something

Happy Halloween!

During my whole adult life, I’ve wished I could go out in costume every Halloween and get candy, but that’s no longer possible: I’m too old. (When I was a kid we’d always go to the rich people’s neighborhoods, as they’d give out whole candy bars instead of stupid Mary Janes or candy corn). I suppose I could just buy candy now, but it’s not the same, and I don’t have kids to tote around as bait.

Regardless, here’s wishing you have a sucrose- and felid-filled holiday, and that you stay away from that flavored petroleum byproduct called “candy corn”! (Also avoid the cylindrical red byproducts called “Twizzlers”.)