Sunday, January 11, 2009

BEWARE! Baby in A Bucket!

Even my four-year-old knows what this means: Don't let your child chase a bumblebee into a bucket of water. . .

It's not enough, in our semi-literate, often multi-lingual society, to merely warn people that high-voltage hazards exist inside that green utility box over there on the corner. Instead, such warnings are often communicated using pictographs, dispensing the need in most cases for words to make the point.

Often, the graphical warnings are straight forward. Sometimes, they're inspired in the over-the-top depiction of the horrors the await those who don't heed their warnings. And sometimes, they're just pretty damned funny.

Here's a few from my collection:

LEARN NOT TO BURN

Burning to death, to me at least, must be one of the most horrible ways to go. And here's two treatments of exiting a building that on fire:

Here's the cool, calm building dweller calmly leaving the scene of a fire (my guess is he's the guy who started the fire and he's trying not to call too much attention to himself). . .

. . .and this guy here is me, getting the HELL OUT as quickly as possible.

Here the artist assumes his work isn't clear enough without the written elaboration. This seems like a particularly awful situation.

HIGH VOLTAGE

You never know when death in the form of an electrical jolt will strike you down. This one is pretty self-explanatory, with little additional flourish. . . .

. . while this sign really anthropomorphizes electricity as a demon that could scare the hell out of you. It's about as far as you can get from the friendly image of Reddy-Killowatt.

FUN WITH HEAVY EQUIPMENT

I particularly like this one for the "whimsical horse-play gone awry" it implies. And look at the detail work! The "boink" marks on the ground, as well as the dent the poor unfortunate's head makes on the earth elevates this warning sign above the strictly pedestrian.

This doesn't look like much fun, does it! Getting crushed by a tractor as it rolls over on top of you down a hill is a particularly awful way to die.

BEWARE PINCH POINTS

It would seem to make sense to keep out of the way of automatic gates, but I suppose some horrible and gruesome death in the past necessitated this sign. . .

While first-time bowlers may well be ignorant of the hazards that await them near the ball-return.

STAIRS ARE DANGEROUS, TOO. . .

This little incident reminds one of a stunt from Jackass. Really, though, if you're going to help out your wheelchair-bound friends, please don't attempt any shortcuts around the ADA ramps. . .

And all that's missing here is a tiny banana peel at the top of the stairs. . .

ENDING WITH A FLOURISH

Mountain-climbing, of course, is fraught with peril. But do mountaineers really need a sign warning them of the hazards of falling into a crevasse? I think not. Where is the sport in that?