3/07/2011

I Wasn't Faithful My Heart Was Away

(fashiongonerogue)

It took me time to grow up. More than normal people need. It took me time to learn to smile again. It took me time to learn to forgive.

A Word.

A Pain.

My Happiness.

You told me: You will be lonely whole your life if you will keep acting like that. And now you are telling your friends with a massive satisfaction that you were right. And you are right. I have abandoned everything what I loved. But there is something you do not understand. Many years ago a cold dagger which hurted me almost for death became a lover of my life.

Early I told to God: Who wants to be born to be a flower trampled by others. I want to dissapear, be invisible, be a rock which don't feel anything. And I wanted to cross the river. But I haven't got any coin to pay a ferryman because I yet did nothing in my life. And I heard a whisper: go back and save other lives with this dagger. It will be hurting your hands and makes you cry and you will be lonely all your life but you will stand up for others who are in need and your hard work will bring a happiness to others. And I said to God: I am devoted to You.

A Word.

A Pain.

Since you left me I can't fall asleep alone in the darkness. But I don't miss you. I wasn't faithful my heart was away.