My travels through the sleazy world of independent wrestling as seen through the hazy murk of nostalgia and filtered through an addiction to pop culture. Written by a whiny, inconsistent, absent-minded procrastinating Grammar-Nazi.

Monday, August 31, 2009

These are just notes for a more formal write-up later in the week. Or I may just use this because I am lazy.

Set-up for the show was a little trickier than we expected, partly because of the flooding during the Vans/Warped show that affected our tear-down and partly because the venue only let us in after 2PM and only let us set-up the ring at 5PM.

That said, the Just for Laughs Studio is a sweet venue. Someone (may have been Dre-Nuke) called it a mini-Medley and that description fits.

Urban Miles lost the match because he froze like a deer in headlights. The kid id talented and really charismatic, but you would never know it from this match.

Filling the charisma vacuum left by Urban Miles was Pauly Platinum who started the match trading gear with Jagged. Pauly practically had a stroke when Jagged elbow-dropped his vest and was then disgusted when Jagged completely no-sold Pauly stomping his bandanna.

I have real issues with Alex Silva's behaviour backstage, but in the ring, he is becoming a real threat.

Izzy Deadyet is always solid and entertaining. This match was no exception.

There was a great little pyramid spot about halfway where Mike Bailey used two guys in the corner as a platform to go nuts. No less than Ron Hutchison, the Toronto promoter singled out Bailey as a wrestler to watch.

The other guy on Ron Hutchison's list? Jagged, who proved that he doesn't need a partner to excel.

WonderFred beat Sunny D in eight seconds.

Kevin called him Chinese, but Sunny D is actually Korean.

Kevin Steen beat WonderFred in 8:48

Kevin Steen interrupted Fred's gloating and came out to essentially kick Fred's ass. Fred put up a good fight, but his ass was definitely kicked. At the end of the match, Kevin taunted Fred with a chant of "Dance Fred Dance" and then pulled off a few dance moves of his own. Just when it looked like Kevin was going to help Fred up to shake his hand, Kevin kicked Fred in the gut and left.

Nic Paterson (in a wheelchair and neck-brace) introduced "Canada's Gretest Athlete" Shane Matthews and Shane's "Main Squeeze" Olivia. (She is already being described as one of the prettiest IWS valets ever and I would have to agree.)

Shane explained to us the "Things you people don't know about Shane Matthews!" including that he was a two-time All American at Rutgers and that he graduated with honours with a diploma in International Affairs.

Shane then recognized Calgary Stampede wrestling legend Kodiak Jack in the crowd and invited him into the crowd. Shane told us that he uses to watch Kodiak Jack on TV every Saturday and thanked Kodiak for inspiring him to become a wrestler. Shane then pitched a fit that Kodiak Jack was stealing Shane's spotlight, kicked Kodiak's cane out from under him and put the boots to the old-timer.

Before the match started, Franky demanded that instead of being called the Rock N' Roid Express to the Clean and Mean Machine. (Twiggy, "You're Clean!?!" Me, "No, he's mean. You're clean.")

Really good match that really picked up when Franky started using Twiggy as a missile and pitching him around the ring to knock down the Untouchables.

Also, on really great moment where Franky gave James two chops that James sort-of no-sold and Twiggy came in and just nailed Stone with a knife-edged chop so perfect that James Stone's eyes crossed - caught somewhere between surprise and pain.

Shayne Hawke defended his Canadian Title beating Sexxxy Eddy after 10:24.

After the show, Eddy was being actively mocked by Beef Wellington for losing this match to a guy that Beef and Eddy helped train.

What Beef doesn't realize is that the student is now at least as good as his teachers. If Beef isn't careful, he is going to talk himself into a match against Shayne Hawke. a match that frankly I am not sure that Beef can win.

Beef Wellington defended his title, beating El Generico in 14:05.

El Generico dominated this match, but Beef was able to wriggle out of every danger. At the climactic moment, El Generico motioned for the Brainbuster, only for Beef to escape again and then mace El Generico in the eyes with Ax body spray, blinding the Generic Luchadore long enough for Beef to hit the E. Coli for the win.

(One unintended casualty of this was El Generico's romantic life. Kevin Steen had set up his running buddy with a "Sure Thing" date, but she was completely unimpressed by El Generico's uncontrollable weeping during their date from his reddened, amced eyes.)

I talked to Beef backstage about his latest shortcut to victory and he reacted with indignation, "How come when the Green Phantom spits Green Mist at people, that's cool but when I spray people with a colorless mist, I am being evil? If it had come out of my mouth would that have been ok? If I had used the Chocolate spray to have some colour would that have met with your approval? You're a hypocrite Llakor! What you object to isn't that I misted El Generico, it's that I did it with a hand-held Caucasian mist. You know what that makes you? A racist, Llakor. You are a racist!"

The Green Phantom lost the Burning Tables match in 9:36 and was fired.

Nic Paterson watched the match from ringside in his wheelchair. My suspicion of Nic malingering was confirmed when the Green Phantom looked poised to win and Nic snuck into the ring to hit the Green Phantom from behind with a chair. He wasn't quite quick enough to make it back to his chair before the Green Phantom spotted him though.

Technically, Manny went through a flaming table first, but the ref was unconscious when it happened. The Green Phantom was celebrating his "victory" when Beef and Eddie hit the ring, attacked the Green Phantom and put him through a second Flaming Table.

Nic, Beef and Eddy continued to attack the Green Phantom after the bell until he was rescued by his fellow "Brother of the Mask" El Generico.

I guess it is pretty clear now that Nic Paterson orchestrated the power outage at the Skratch that led to Beef Wellington beating Kevin Steen for the title in the first place.

The Winner of the YoungCuts Repechage Public Vote: Vigilante by/par Mitchell Arend, Canada. A costumed crime-fighter reflects on his career choice with a TV news crew.

Duplicate Complicate by by Peter Ian Mancao, Philippines. One twin pushes the limits of outdoing the other to get the girl he likes.

The following films in this screening are short-listed for the Mirror Weekly Best Short Shorts Award.

Passé Composé by Alexandre Lynn and Mathieu Grimard, Canada. Félix tente de reconstituer les éléments d'hier. Il fait face à lui-même lorsqu'il apprend la mort de sa mère. Felix tries to piece together his memories of the day before. To his surprise, he confronts himself when he learns of the death of his mother.

The Kill by Joe Vea, USA. The boyfriend finds his love slain and seeks to avenge her killer.

Alien Abduction by David Han, USA. A hungry alien tries to bring home a bull to cook and eat.

Jalouse by Melanie Delloye, France/USA. As she watches her mother and brother play, a jealous little girl sits by herself on a swing.

1271 by Michael Warczak, Australia. Have you found Jesus yet?

Breathless by Kyle Sandilands, Canada. A man reflects on his destructive actions after vowing to avenge his girlfriend's death.

Swipe by Max Blustin, UK. A request to borrow some money brings about unexpected consequences.

The Reel Man by Kieran Heilbron, Canada. A short film about a man, a hat and a fishing rod.

Dogface by Shai Halfon, USA. A world War II soldier, suffering from combat stress, sits alone in his foxhole behind enemy lines.

Cogency by Tyler Knell, USA. After her husband locks himself in the bathroom and does not respond, a woman calls the police and explains the events leading to his death.

Le Cou Cou by Zed Bennett Jr., USA. The interaction between a shop owner and a malfunctioning cuckoo clock.

Layang-Layang (Kites) by Agnes G. Wiguna, Canada. A childhood story about a boy who wants to catch the clouds.

Tah-Dah by Stacey Chomiak, Canada/USA. One bug. One farmer. And the cello that brought them together.

Estigia (Styx) by Claudette Montero, Argentina/USA. They say that witchcraft does not exist but we must never forget the capacity of hatred and another human being.

Mala Smrt (Little Death) by Claiborne McDonald, Czech Republic/USA. The sexual exploits of a teenage girl manifest their consequences in the death of her father.

Static by Jack Lykins, USA.

Doll Call by Sanabel Almomani, Chris Gonzalez and Yesenia Deleon, USA. What happens when the forces of evil are awakened and a doll becomes a mechanical killer?

Friday, August 28, 2009

We are living in the strangest, most unprecedented week in Quebec Wrestling history. We started the week with a beginning that no one saw coming and we will end the week with an ending that no one ever expected to see.

On one hand, tomorrow during the International Wrestling Syndicate show Hardcore Heat, the Green Phantom and PCP Crazy F'N Manny will face each other in a Burning Tables Match, and the loser of the match will be FIRED in every sense of the world.

So at IWS, we are about to experience an ending as one of the Hardcore originals will be banished from the promotion. Meanwhile over at Inter Species Wrestling, Sunday saw a new and completely unexpected beginning during the ISW 4th Year Anniversary as Giant Tiger became the ISW Champion, beating Player Uno in an impromptu match to end the show.

Number One Contender Match: Kevin Steen beat Twiggy with a Package Piledriver after 15:04 to become the Number One Contender to the ISW Title.

Inter Species Wrestling Title Match: Player Uno defended his title, beating El Generico in 14:42

Giant Tiger Match: Giant Tiger beat Player Uno to become the Inter Species Wrestling Champion..

*****

4 Years of THIS?!Detailed Results

Here is how the Inter Species Wrestling 4th Year Anniversary show started for me: I was helping the ISW big-breasted merchandise girl at the gimmick table when the ISW music went off and I realized that I was in completely the wrong place to start the show. I White-Rabbited around the crowd heading for the stage, until I ran up the stairs leading to the stage and banged my head off the metal ceiling of the staircase.

My head was still ringing when Giant Tiger hit the ring to call out Mike Rotch for his match. When Rotchy refused to come out, Giant Tiger threatened Rotchy promising to ruin Inter Species Wrestling. After he left, I introduced our ring announcer and left to find some aspirin.

4 Years of THIS?! began with a match between the world's fastest zombie, Zombiefied and Michael Von Payton. M.V.P. started the match pretending to be Zombiefied's friend, shaking his hand, slapping him and then trying the same trick thirty seconds later. Unfortunately for M.V.P. while Zombiefied may have lost some brain function, he is not a complete idiot and Zombified does have a long memory. While M.V.P. was able to use a series of back-breakers to slow Zombiefied down, it wasn't enough to stop him from going up top to flip his way to victory.

I have been waiting in dread for the sexual harassment paperwork from Addy Star after this match. Steve may be even more sexually aggressive than Sexxxy Eddy. A desperate Addy was forced to deliver more low blows than a Ric Flair "Dirtiest Player of the Game" high-light reel. Disturbingly, after losing the match to Sodomy, Addy did an about-turn and started chasing after Steve.

Before their planned three-way dance started, Viking and Sexxxy Eddy sat in the crowd drinking beer while Beef Wellington got on the mike and denounced ISW management for allowing wrestlers to get drunk before and during a match. Beef said that he had only agreed to do the match because he was paid in advance, but Beef refused to work in such unsafe conditions and quit not just the match but the whole promotion.

One quick historical point: ISW's origins lie in Beef's famous match against A Bear during the IWS Fifth Anniversary show V in June 2004. ISW would not exist without Beef Wellington.

Without Beef Wellington, the three-way dance became an all-out brawl between Viking and Sexxxy Eddy. They killed themselves through the crowd with Viking having the edge outside teh ring, but Eddy regaining control every time they got back into the ring. In a move that could basically be described as a raised middle finger to ISW on behalf of his fellow member of the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Sexxxy Eddy secured his victory against Viking by stealing Steve's Sodomy submission which we had seen just moments before. A furious Viking retaliated by hitting Eddy with a cock-slam after Eddy's submission victory was announced.

Stinky and Flip damn near killed each other in the World's first ever Fans Bring the Lego Death Weapons Match. It was by no means an easy victory for Stinky: he had to overcome Flip's allies bovine overlords, Moostafa and Moohammad. Having done that, Stinky had to recover from a series of Lego-assisted curb stomps. The tide turned when Stinky pulled out a cardboard D-Lo Brown vest covered in Lego and Stinky sealed the deal with two massive Stink Power-Bombs into a huge pile of Lego.

After the match, Stinky tried to shake Flip's hand and his former best friend appeared to want to take Stinky up on the offer, but Moohammad yanked Flip away with his leash.

After the intermission, James Stone tried to win the ISW Other match in a sequel to his match against Moohammad the Terrorist Cow from our Vans/Warped show. In their first match, James went up top and paid the price when Moohammad pushed from off the top head-first into the crowd (and the guard-rails between the crowd and the ring.) In a reprise, James dominated the match but lost when he went up top, only for Moostafa to unexpectedly save his brother by tossing Moohammad the ISW Other belt which James hit head-first.

Moostafa sometimes seems to be living in his own world. He was in a surprisingly good mood on Sunday despite not making this year's roster of Dancing With the Stars having been rejectred for being neither a star nor human. During his brother's match, Moostafa was having his own match with an imaginary opponent leading to an imaginary victory for the ISW Other belt. Flushed with that victory and with having done the right thing for once and saving his brother's belt, Moostafa issued an open challenge... answered by Maximus Primal who destroyed the Dancing Cow in twenty seconds. Maximus Primal then announced that he was gunning for the ISW Other Title which he would win for himself and the fans.

Izzy Deadyet ran his winning streak up to five victories defeating El Hijo del Bamboo by Shining Wizard with That Zombie Move. In a nauseating twist, Izzy kept regaining the advantage in teh match by ripping his own ear off and stuffing it down either the ref's throat or the Puroresu Panda's throat. Fortunately, Izzy contented himself with merely beating Bamboo Jr. rather than also devouring the Panda's brains as Izzy did with Dan Paysan and Pinkie Sanchez during his current reign of terror.

Has Twiggy ever had a bad match in ISW? M.V.P. may have the initials, but Twiggy is Inter-Species Wrestling's Most Valuable Wrestler. Here is why I love Twiggy as a wrestler: There is no way in hell that Twiggy should ever be able to beat Kevin Steen, but Twiggy had the crowd convinced, had himself convinced and almost had Kevin Steen convinced that Twiggy's victory was inevitable.

In one of the many great moments of the match, Steen (who had previously stolen and worn Twiggy's bandanna) tried to put on Twiggy's leather jacket, got trapped with it halfway on. After Steen finally got loose, he gave the jacket an elbow drop and kicked it into the crowd. The closest Twiggy came to pinning Steen came after Twiggy ambushed Steen while he was kicking the leather jacket out of the ring.

The key word is almost. When Steen realized that he was in danger of losing the match, he found that extra gear that makes him one of Canada's best and finished Twiggy off. With the victory secure, Kevin Steen praised Twiggy just long enough for Twiggy to drop his guard, at which point Kevin - like a total dick - stomped Twiggy down.

It seems hard to believe that Player Uno and El Generico have never faced one another in a singles match. Both men are very similar in style and in their appeal to the fans with Generico being faster and Uno having a bit more power. With both men being fan favourites, the crowd simply cheered the good wrestling and there was a lot to celebrate. Uno had the tiniest sliver of an advantage that he exploited to win the match, giving the 8-Bit luchadore successful title defences against Kevin Steen, Twiggy, Hallowicked, Viking, El Generico and M.V.P.

But Uno had no time to celebrate his hard-won victory. Giant Tiger came out of nowhere to whack Uno with his walking stick and waving his open contract at the referee, demanded that a title match start right away. While Uno was woozy from the cane shot, he refused to allow himself to be pinned quickly and easily. Uno rallied to attack Giant Tiger, but before he could pin the Gingerbread Man, Sexxxy Eddy hit the ring and clobbered Uno with the title belt. One no-hands pedigree later and the unthinkable had happened: Giant Tiger had gone from joke to evil genius and ISW champion and the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen have taken control of Inter Species Wrestling.

Eddy and GY attacked Uno after the bell. Stunned by what happened, I foolishly got into the ring, only to be attacked in-turn by Giant Tiger, suffering a mild concussion when either Tiger or Eddy sat on my head still ringing from the whack that I gave myself earlier in the show.

In a not-an-apology phone call this week, Giant Tiger explained to me that he had attacked me, partly because I got in-between him and Uno, and partly because he was worried that I "was about to Jack Tunney the belt away!" Truthfully, I would like nothing better. Sadly, Giant Tiger had a legal contract to wrestle anyone he wanted at any time, for the stakes of his choice and under the rules of his choice. Making matters worse, Uno had a long-standing policy that he would accept any challenge. Under those circumstances, I have no choice but to recognize Giant Tiger as the legal Inter Species Wrestling Champion.

I now have copies of the IWS Tenth Anniversary show X in my office. They are $20, or you can get the DVD and a VIP ticket to Hardcore Heat for $30. Special is good until Friday, August 28th. You can pay by paypal: Llakor@hotmail.com or contact me at that e-mail address for more details.

*****

International Wrestling Syndicate presents Hardcore Heat on Saturday, August 29th, at the Just For Laughs Museum Studio, 2101 Saint-Laurent, Montreal. Doors open at 8:00PM, Bell rings at 9:00PM. VIP Tickets are $20, Regular Tickets are $15.00. 18+ Card and Times subject to change.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

One of the places that I cross-post reviews to is CRZ's the-w message board, the heir to the very first message board that I first posted to and wrote for which indirectly led to me writing for the IWS. One of the neat features of the-w message board is the they track referrals that searched and found threads on the board. As an example here are the tracked referrals for my Inglorious Baterd review.

It is pretty natural to click on some of those Google searches to see what else they lead to, which lead me to discover two things:

1) On the message board of cinemablend.com a user named pauljeremiah basically copied my Inglorious Basterds review verbatim. Here is the cache of the page, since PJ has since erased his post once he was busted.

Excerpt of the review:Case in point, during the opening sequence the Nazi "Jew Hunter" SS Colonel Hans Landa (Christian Waltz) is interrogating French dairy farmer Perrier LaPadite (Denis Menochet). Landa suspects that LaPadite is hiding a family of Jews. While subtly pressuring LaPadite, Landa asks for a glass of milk. After greedily gulping it down, Landa compliments LaPadite on his daughters and his cows, "Mes compliments a vos filles et vos vaches." The thing of it is, in French "vache" means cow, but it is also a vulgar name for the vagina. If reprimanded for this vulgar pun, Landa could quite convincingly claim not to understand French well enough to have meant it that way, but Landa does mean it that way and he means it as a threat. And LaPadite understands his meaning all too well.

That is a really subtle piece of acting and word-play that many audiences would never catch, or at least they might understand the subtext without knowing the exact nature of the threat. The film is rich with that kind of detail. All of the French and English dialogue is chosen with that same attention to detail and while I can't swear to the German, I would suspect that it shows a similar level of craft.

After greedily gulping it down, Landa compliments LaPadite on his daughters and his cows, "Mes compliments a vos filles et vos vaches." The thing of it is, in French "vache" means cow, but it is also a vulgar name for the vagina.

I don't know where you read or heard that, but to me it would be absolutely new !! I'm pretty sure that "vache" never had this meaning for anyone in France!Please correct me if I'm wrong...

I don't know about that... it would be a strange pun to make and I don't think Landa, the eternal gentleman who purposefully left his men a good 20 metres from the house when he went in would get so direct and vulgar. Complimenting his beautiful wife & daughters is more than enough of a distant, veiled threat I think.I don't speak French at all so I don't know if the pun works and I can't tell how good Landa's French is.

Talking about puns, does anyone know why they called the film Inglourious basterds? I find the title pointless and terrible, but maybe there is some sort of a meaning I just don't get.

Inglorious Basterds | Not in Canadian French either...August 25, 2009 6:24 AMForum: Off topicTopic: Inglorious BasterdsPoster: Marie-Claude FalardeauPost title: Not in Canadian French either...

Nope, no such meaning in Canadian French either. It would be new to me as well ;)

Talking about puns, does anyone know why they called the film Inglourious basterds? I find the title pointless and terrible, but maybe there is some sort of a meaning I just don't get.

You typed one extra "u" ( the first one) in inglorious, or is that intended? BastErds is intentional isn't it?

I couldn't tell, as I haven't seen the movie. The title represents the entire film / broad context so it would be useful to know the film before discussing the title.

Other than that, what isn't clear in " inglorious basterds" ? the intentional misspelling of basterds has its sarcastic purpose.., and I presume it also serves the plot and general language style used in the film. Anything else? Personally, I find this phrasal and eclectic combination of a formal archaic word ( inglorious) and modern slang word ( basterds) quite entertaining.

Here is an excerpt from an interview with Tarantino when asked why he chose to misspell the words in the title of the film:

'Inglourious Basterds' comes from long line of tricky, touchy titles

Quentin Tarantino isn't saying why he spelled the title of his Second World War adventure, "Inglourious Basterds," the way he did. The writer-director is enjoying having a little fun with his audience, similar to the way he credited himself and Uma Thurman, with whom he co-wrote the "Kill Bill" movies, by their initials Q and U."I'm never going to explain that," Tarantino said during a news conference in May at the Cannes Film Festival, where "Inglourious Basterds" premiered. "When you do an artistic flourish like that, to describe it, to explain it, would just . . . invalidate the whole stroke in the first place. (Artist Jean-Michel) Basquiat takes the letter L from a hotel room door and sticks it in his painting," he added. "If he describes why he did it, he might as well not have done it at all."

I have no clue about the movie, synopsis and characters other than what I've read in this thread. I haven't googled anything either.

As for the specific language in movies or drama in general, it can be used purposely to match the character. That said, I would say that kind of misspelling would match a mediocre Joe who can't spell and is uneducated, never read a book in his life, or maybe the mockery of such people. Shakespeare used that a lot, that is using various language forms for different characters.

It can also be a tool to attract media attention without any hidden meaning whatsoever. He may be testing the waters and the audience. People like to think there is a hidden mysterious meaning behind everything. And now he has all these journalists asking the question so he can say " I won't tell ya" ..Hmmm...

Other than that, what isn't clear in " inglorious basterds" ? the intentional misspelling of basterds has its sarcastic purpose.., and I presume it also serves the plot and general language style used in the film.

I just find it dumb and annoying. Yes, Brad Pitt's character and his men are not exactly the university professor types, so you could easily imagine them making that sort of a mistake - in fact, they do, I just found out that it is scratched into somebody's rifle stock. But that doesn't make it any less of a horrible title... and, although I'm not a native speaker, I can't really imagine anyone misspelling inglorious as inglourious.Anyway, the rifle thing clears it up: it's just a "Look at me!" title that tries to be original or something, there is no pun or other reference... Bleh.The film is very good, though. It's dark, cruel and bloody, but it is very good.Inglorious Basterds | Well

Talking about puns, does anyone know why they called the film Inglourious basterds? I find the title pointless and terrible, but maybe there is some sort of a meaning I just don't get.

I think the spelling is pure whimsy.

The reference to the vache pun was the film reviewer's not mine. I thought that perhaps it was a French expression unfamiliar to Canadian francophones. On reflection and after discussion with one of my Quebecois patients, I think one might translate "vache" as "bitch", but not "vagina". In English, if one calls a woman a "cow" it means essentially that she is obese.

Michael Barnett wrote:In English, if one calls a woman a "cow" it means essentially that she is obese.

Since when, exactly? It certainly doesn't mean that in British English! It's more synonymous with bitch - I wouldn't associate it in any way at all with a reference to weight, unless used in combination with "fat". But even then it's not the "cow" bit of the insult that's referring to weight.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076584/Inglorious Basterds | To the correct spelling which was a mistake, of course :-)August 26, 2009 9:39 AMForum: Off topicTopic: Inglorious BasterdsPoster: Özden ArıkanPost title: To the correct spelling which was a mistake, of course :-)

Michael Barnett wrote:

Özden Arıkan wrote:

Michael, you've misspelled the movie title in your thread title :-)

Are you referring to the incorrect spelling that was deliberate or the correct spelling which was a mistake? :-)

Michael

Admittedly, I realized it -the movie title- was "inglourious" only after seeing this thread, which, in turn, was one week later than making everybody laugh at me in the theatre with a comment like "Oh, Germans misspelled the 'bastard'" :D

Since when, exactly? It certainly doesn't mean that in British English! It's more synonymous with bitch - I wouldn't associate it in any way at all with a reference to weight, unless used in combination with "fat". But even then it's not the "cow" bit of the insult that's referring to weight.

Marie-Hélène Hayles wrote:Michael Barnett wrote:In English, if one calls a woman a "cow" it means essentially that she is obese.

Since when, exactly? It certainly doesn't mean that in British English! It's more synonymous with bitch - I wouldn't associate it in any way at all with a reference to weight, unless used in combination with "fat". But even then it's not the "cow" bit of the insult that's referring to weight.

I do agree, however with the assessment given in the Guardian, this is a well acted but mediocre film, and though it did hold my attention, I left irritated at the hollowness of what I had just seen, not to mention the feeling (I don't know how to show this) that somehow American cultural attitudes of the present were being superimposed on German and French characters of 60+ years ago. And the "revenge of the Jews" argument just does not make sense to me...

An interesting discussion, although to me a little bewidering, since I have heard vache used as a slang for vagina in Montreal, Ottawa and in both New Brunswick and Nova Scotia.

Here is my full response on that message board:

Hi

I'm the guy who wrote the review being quoted. The imdb review is an excerpt of my full review from my blog: http://llakor.blogspot.com/2009/07/fantasia-film-fest-review-inglorious.html

My background is that I am half-Acadian and half-Quebec Irish born in Quebec and raised in Montreal, the Quebec Laurentians, Ottawa, New Brunswick and Nova Scotia.

In all the places that I have lived "vache" has been a vulgar term for vagina in the French and Acadian communities. Typically around here vache is pronounced approximately "vaash" and the vag from vagin is pronounced "vaaje" so it is very close. (And around here in English vag ("vaj") is used as a verbal shorthand for vagina as well.)

***

I obviously can't speak for the French of France, just my own community.

But it's not like I was the only person that got the reference either. When I saw the film with 700 people at the sold-out Canadian premiere in Montreal to close out the Fantasia Film Festival that line was greeted with a half-groan, half-boo from the majority of the crowd - one of the reasons why it stuck with me. (Although when I was writing up the review at 2am that night I didn't quite get the quote right.)

There are some other references that pop out through the French, the most notable one that I can think of happens when Shosanna is sparring with Zoller outside her cinema and says that the French honour directors which references the fact that Tarantino has always been well-treated by the French especially at Cannes. There may very well be word-play hidden in the German, supposedly Tom Twyker helped with the German dialogue.

***

That whole opening sequence is built on the sub-text of rape and murder. LaPadite plays a shell game with his daughters, trying to keep them away from the Nazis, sending them into their home, then when forced to by Landa inviting Landa in alone with his daughters, then again when forced to sending his girls out to be alone with the Nazi soldiers. And for a gentleman, Landa rather deliberately leers at LaPadite's youngest daughter.

My recollection is that Landa has three soldiers and LaPadite has three daughters (no wife from what I remember) which would be a very deliberate mirror by Tarantino emphasized at the end when Landa goes to the door where the girls exited and loudly invites them back in - only they have been replaced by Landa's soldiers.

I was supposed to be announcing the 5th entrant in the 6 man match and then the 6th entrant was going to be a surprise. The 5th entrant was scheduled to be WonderFred, looking to reestablish himself in the IWS, and needing a win to do so, but then Fred got his own idea.

If I was being a cynic, I would tell you that Fred was concerned that in a six man match he would have to share the spotlight with five other wrestlers and splitting the crowd's attention that many ways didn't give Fred enough glory, but actually that's not being cynical that's being factual.

Fred told us that he is the biggest star in Quebec and that there is no way that he could prove that in a six man match - that he needed to be the center of attention in order to prove to the world what was so obvious to him.

In order to satisfy Fred's demands, we have decided to change the Six-Man Scramble match into a Fatal Four-Way Match and give Fred the singles match that he is demanding. We are currently trying to find Fred the world-class opponent that he so clearly deserves.

*****

Canada's Greatest Athlete

Nic Paterson has gotten it into his head that I inadvertently buried this announcement earlier. Completely untrue. I deliberately buried it.

But I did say that I would make the announcement again. Hopefully announcing the Fred bit first will bury this again. Nic is really excited that he has signed to the IWS roster - Canada's Greatest Athlete!

I guess Nic is hoping that people will go nuts trying to guess who this amazing athlete could possibly be.

...

...

...

All right. I will start: Is it Iron Mike Sharpe? He used to call himself Canada's Greatest Athlete.

I now have copies of the IWS Tenth Anniversary show X in my office. They are $20, or you can get the DVD and a VIP ticket to Hardcore Heat for $30. Special is good until Friday, August 28th. You can pay by paypal: Llakor@hotmail.com or contact me at that e-mail address for more details.

*****

International Wrestling Syndicate presents Hardcore Heat on Saturday, August 29th, at the Just For Laughs Museum Studio, 2101 Saint-Laurent, Montreal. Doors open at 8:00PM, Bell rings at 9:00PM. VIP Tickets are $20, Regular Tickets are $15.00. 18+ Card and Times subject to change.

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About Me

I am the Festival Director for the YoungCuts Film Festival; the head writer/publicist/SHILL~ for the International Wrestling Syndicate; and the Commissioner and Worst Ring Announcer in the Multiverse for Inter-Species Wrestling.