Hello, everyone. It is time once again for my review of the latest Doctor Who episode, so please indulge me as I bore the shit out of you while I talk about the various intricacies of the Christmas Special. Ok, ready, guys? Here we go.

I wasn’t able to talk about the last two episodes before The Snowmen, mainly because The Power of Three and The Angels Take Manhattan were two of the most heartbreaking Doctor Who episodes I have seen since Rose Tyler and Donna Noble’s respective exits. I really, really, loved the Ponds, ok? Rory’s my second-favorite companion after Donna, and we all know about my unhealthy obsession with Amy Pond and her ginger sexiness. Which is why I was both dreading and anticipating Clara’s debut as companion in The Snowmen. How the hell is she going to live up to the Ponds? Also, is she going to be another sassy, sexy, companion in the same vein as Amy and River?

Full review, plus spoilers, after this point!

So The Snowmen is set in 1892, where the Doctor has been hiding and sulking after the Ponds died – despite the strong objections of Commander Strax and our favorite Victorian Detective Ninja Lesbian Inter-Species Couple, Jenny and Madame Vastra. (Try saying “Victorian Detective Ninja Lesbian Inter-Species Couple” out loud five times. Come on.) He meets Clara, a girl who is insistent that he helps her out figuring the mystery of the living psychic snow that turns into murderous snowmen. Murderous snow voiced by Ian “Gandalf and Magneto” McKellen with the manager from Spice World controlling the snow. Yeah. How awesome is that?

Anyway, the Doctor, despite his insistence that his days of adventures and saving the universe are through, ends up investigating the mysterious snow, and discovers how wonderful this Clara girl is. Seriously. The moment Clara shows that spark of brilliance in her when Madame Vastra puts her on the one-word test, I was sold. It was one of my favorite moments of any companion, ever. I also love the idea of her dying twice.

Anyway, thoughts, in bullet form:

Before, I theorized that Clara Oswin Oswald uploaded her mind to the Dalek Neural Web before she died in Asylum of the Daleks. We all know it didn’t pan out this way, but I think she’s related to the Great Intelligence in one way or another. That’s how she keeps on living.

When the Doctor gives Clara the key to the TARDIS, it felt so amazing. It’s just one of those moments that have earned its emotional gravitas. It has given me so many feelings.

The resolution felt rushed, like in The Power of Three, but I’m willing to give it a pass because of the brilliant reintroduction of Clara.

I love Strax, Jenny, and Vastra, and I would pay to see them in their own spin-off.

Speaking of Strax, oh you poor potato, you.

I love the Doctor-Strax dynamic. I want to see a few episodes of just the two of them sans other companions.

And it felt a bit cramped, but I really, really, love the new TARDIS interior. I love how everything is moving inside. I kinda miss the coat hanger though – small touches like that make the TARDIS for me.

I know this isn’t really popular, but I love the callback to the 80’s Doctor Who with the new title sequence. And hearing the new theme song and how it combines all versions of the theme songs over the years has given me goosebumps.

Oh, hey, they brought back the Doctor’s face in the title sequence! Finally!

Given that this was a Christmas special, I was ready to accept that it was going to be cheesier than usual. Yep. Thankfully it wasn’t as cheesy as last year’s special.

We were SO close to having a modern Who companion who wasn’t from the 21st century! I was hoping to see Victorian Clara cope with the future.

I liked Clara’s personality here better than her appearance in Asylum of the Daleks. She’s more subdued and less sassy, and her kindness really shows, as opposed to Amy Pond’s sass-back tendencies.

I wish they’d veer away from the sassy girl personality of recent companions, but Clara’s different enough from Amy that I like her already.

No more River Song, please. I don’t care how awesome a Clara-River confrontation becomes. I don’t want to see her anymore.

Doctor Who, can we have a single companion who doesn’t kiss the Doctor? I mean, Jesus, you even got Rory and the Doctor to snog.

The Sherlock Holmes bit was brilliant! Also, “it takes one to snow one.”

“It’s smaller on the outside.” BRILLIANT.

The joke about the London Underground being a weak strategic point in 1967 made no sense, until I found out that the Second Doctor first encounters the Great Intelligence in the London Underground in 1967. PREDESTINATION PARADOX, BITCHES.

I loved the bow tie bit. Seriously. What else could be the best way to show the Doctor was back.

More scenes of Jenna-Louise Coleman running. Please.

I believe that this was the best introduction of a companion ever. Clara had huge shoes to fill after Amy, and she delivered.

A Christmas Carol is still my favorite special, honestly, but this is a great way to introduce a new companion. Excited for the rest of series 7.

Now, you tell me what you thought of The Snowmen – let me hear your thoughts in the comments!