“The presidential candidates were right: Main Street IS more important than Wall Street. So I woke up this morning and decided to officially change the name Wall Street to Main Street.”

NEW YORK, NY – New York City’s Mayor Michael Bloomberg is gearing up for a run at a third term in office. He’s making the usual rounds of fundraisers and kissing babies to drum up support. But in the wake of the failing financial institutions, Bloomberg needed a big hook to get New Yorkers on his side. So, today, in a private ceremony, Bloomberg officially issued the civic edict changing the name of Manhattan’s most famous street.

“The presidential candidates were right: Main Street IS more important than Wall Street. So I woke up this morning and decided to officially change the name Wall Street to Main Street,” said Bloomberg. No New Yorkers seem to have noticed the change.