cracking up....I also am on a Subaru forum, and they currently have a "Do you fart in your car?" poll... immediately thought of PPK... ;)

answer: its my number one spot for it

Worst thing ever though, when I drive my husband to work, he farts in the car before he gets up and out of the car, and when he does get up the smell is released, and I'm left with a smelly drive home.

I also think it's funny because I once had a Subaru nicknamed Smelly Car. It was my dream car at the time, a Subaru Loyale wagon, and we did get a decent price because of the smell, but just thinking about it makes me feel nauseated.

_________________I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk

Two summers ago, my husband gambled and lost while he was driving down state. It wasn't a big accident, but it smelled like hell. He had to stop at an outlet mall to try to clean up in a bathroom and then walk into the Adidas store with poopie pants, to get a new outfit. He said that the sales guy kept giving him hateful/sort of hurt glances while he was helping him, as if to say "Why, why are you doing this to me?". Every time he wears the outfit that he bought there, I say he looks like "the shiitake". No one can figure out why I think "he looks so great" in this outfit. TMI? Maybe so, but I care not!

poopiebitch wrote:

I'm reviving this thread, because earlier I was changing poopiebaby's nappy and suddenly I hear my husband rush out of his office (next door to the nursery) and quickly slam the door behind him. I asked it there was something wrong, and it turns out he did a fart that smelled so bad he chased himself out of his own office.

I was already laughing at this thread when I read mel's post, now I'm crying laughing (actual tears!). My chest hurts and I nearly peed reading about your husband PB. I can't read any more in case I do actually pee.

OMG, I keep farting at my desk! I can't help it. Good Lard I hope these don't start to smell. That's what I get for eating beans at two meals yesterday.

_________________I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk

I haven't been farting much lately, but I did have that wonderful experience where you go to a store, get a cart, put a few things in it, and then you have to poop. It's the biggest poop of your life. So you rush around the store, farting, trying to check out so you can run to the bathroom.

_________________"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear

_________________I would eat Dr. Cow pocket cheese in a second. I would eat it if you hid it under your hat, or in your backpack, but not if it was in your shoe. That's where I draw the line. -allularpunk

Ok, so I just had to bump this thread to tell a story that happened a few days ago. It started with some delicious cabbage broccoli soup that I ate way to much of. After dinner, I retreated into my room to do some reading. The door was shut. Before long, I farted, and it was a reallyyyyy bad one. But whatever, because I was alone, right? So the gas kept coming and I kept letting it out. After a while, either because I was too engrossed in my book, or because I had gotten used to it, or because I was subconsciously breathing through my mouth, I didn't notice the smell anymore.

Then my roommate walked in to ask me a question. She got about two steps in before she stopped in mid-sentence, pulled her shirt over her nose, staggered backwards while spinning around, and slammed the door shut. I was cracking up at this point, but I was able to hear her yelling something about "gas chamber" and "my mouth was open." She also claimed that she could still smell it the next day, but I think (hope?) she was exaggerating.

_________________Yay, and verily he said unto them, "Eat this nooch for it tastes kind of like cheese, and drink this kombucha for it is awesome. And don't be a vegan hating douche because no one likes an asshat." - DancesWithTofu

_________________My last Craigslist ad "Bangable Panda for You" got only a few responses and they all just said 'send pic' or 'black and white or red?' - pandacookieI don't want anyone here who doesn't know every forking line to Willy Wonka. - Fee

I had fresh juice this morning too close to my breakfast, so I figure that's why I've been farting all day. But they're baby ones. They're toots.

_________________My brother had a beehive in Ithaca, and a bear destroyed it.He has a new beehive now, but this one has hurtful anti-bear epithets scrawled all over it.And that's why I don't eat honey.

Had lots of Daiya yesterday. Today, I'm gonna need an exorcist or fumigator or something... I'm packing enough blast power to fly myself across the Atlantic, and my husband won't sit in the same room with me.

_________________Yay, and verily he said unto them, "Eat this nooch for it tastes kind of like cheese, and drink this kombucha for it is awesome. And don't be a vegan hating douche because no one likes an asshat." - DancesWithTofu

I wish Brian were so forgiving. Every time I fart he gives me a look like I just pissed on his grandma. And then I laugh because he's looking at me and he says he looks at me like that because I think it's funny but I wouldn't be laughing if I didn't know he was about to act totally disgusted.

_________________"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear

And my husband has always been a fart-factory, but he acts disgusted when I fart! It's apparently okay for him to rip 20+ (stinky) farts each day, but I let one loose and it's sooooo nasty? I just laugh.

I have a student we'll call DJ. DJ should not eat whatever the hell it is he eats all the time. He clears my room out daily with the stank-ness. Anyway, today DJ was being his usual gassy self and just after he let one go, someone else did too, and then another, and then another. I had a friggin chain reaction! My room was hazmat material for two hours. We seriously moved outside because it was so bad. The principal thought the bathroom across the hall was backed up and didn't believe it was in my room until I made him walk in. Half the upper floor was complaining of the smell. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Monday's writing prompt is going to be about farting.

_________________~Sweet songs the youth, the wise, the meeting of all wisdom. To believe in the good in man.