Okay, so I had mentioned to my mother's husband that I couldn't find the right outfit for Noelle so I could have pictures done for Christmas cards. He tells me that he wants to buy her a dress and since the one from last year was so cute and she adored it, I told him to go for it.

They call me and tell me they found the dress and shoes and everything. They send it to me and the dress is very cute and sparkly (she won't go near a dress unless it's sparkly or something) and then I find the shoes. Um. Strappy heels. Lucite, see through heels. For a 20 month old girl.

I'm outraged, because my mother should really know better, but I have no idea what to do aside from returning them and just not saying anything to Grandma and Grandpa about it.

Oh my gosh. I want to see pictures. That's nuts! I think that you should just thank them for the dress and tell them she's not ready for high heels yet and she can't walk in them, so you had to exchange them for something else.

I think you should just be upfront and tell them you thought the shoes were inappropriate. I think too often as parents we don't want to make waves with the grandparents, but this is something that could repeat itself in a few years if you don't nip it in the bud now.

_________________Otters main method of attack is forceful hugging. ~amandabear

ah jeez stripper shoes for toddlers! what next?!?!? (actually, I don't wanna know)I'd say to tell them that she can't walk in them but then they might say you could at least use the shoes when she's standing still for the photos. Sounds to me like you do need to tell them they're inappropriate but I'm afraid I can't think of a way to word that in a way where they won't be offended. I bet you can do it though, since you know them, right?

I can't find rainboots that are small enough to fit the Emperor, but there are HIGH HEELS for toddlers out there? It hurts my brain.

If they ask about the shoes, I'd just tell them they didn't fit. Or whip out the ol' pediatrician said not to do it speech. Or heck, just tell them it is forking INSANE to put high heels on a less than 2 year old!!

I cringe EVERY TIME I see high heels for little girls and toddlers. I cringe EVERY TIME I see a toddler/little girl in heels.

This is something you will have to nip in the bud now. Your mother needs to know you feel this is inappropriate footwear for a child (um...because it is inappropriate). If anything else, tell your mother the pediatrician said it was not healthy for toddlers to wear heels for ANY amount of time...even just standing for pictures.

I would go with all the others who said you must say that they are not appropriate. If you just say she can't stand in them, or they don't fit, then the grandparents are missing the message, which is: high heels for toddlers are WRONG.

_________________Everyone turns into Boo Radley, if they live long enough ~ seitanicversesThere are as many ways to live as there are humans in the world ~ SchwaGrrrl

Oh man, I saw a little girl with those ruby slippers from Target at the park the other day, and totally wanted to steal them from her. She proudly told me that they were the last pair at the store. Jealous!

Seeing as how heels are so good for grown women's feet/knees/back, I don't see the problem with sticking them on the forming feet of a toddler. What could possibly go wrong?

This is what I was thinking. I mean, aside from being just plain inappropriate, isn't it common knowledge that wearing heels isn't great health-wise? So why the hell is it cute to have a baby wear them?

I remember when the Cruise/Holmes bambino was getting flack (well, it was her parents who were getting it) for wearing heels. Was that just last year? Kate said they were dance shoes and that people should mind their own business. Which I suppose is a fine response. But as for my daughter? No heels. I don't care if they came from grammie or not. I would say she wasn't able to comfortably walk in them and then I'd laugh and say something like "Thank goodness. I wasn't looking forward to the looks in the doctor's/pediotrist's office when they got a load of those. Cute, but not for baby feets!)

I think use of the word inappropriate is bound to hurt some feelings. I'd just tell her she couldn't/wouldn't wear the shoes but that you found some others to go with the beautiful dress.

But if the OP believes it to be inappropriate I think that should be communicated. It could be a great learning moment for the grandparents. Or it could be a time when they get defensive and have their feelings hurt. It's up to them how to take it, and I don't think the responsibility falls upon the OP to be less than truthful to protect their feelings when doing something that's pretty messed up.

_________________"I'd rather have dried catshit! I'd rather have astroturf! I'd rather have an igloo!"~Isa

"But really, anyone willing to dangle their baby in front of a crocodile is A-OK in my book."~SSD

I called my mom last night and thanked her for the dress and told her that Noelle wouldn't go near the shoes, so I couldn't tell if they fit. She felt bad and promised to send me the gift receipt. I said something along the lines of "she won't wear anything with a slidey bottom/heel" and "I can't get her to wear anything but sneakers", both of which are true statements.

I'm more pissed that they actually make shoes like this. I feel like the heel is much higher in person than in the photos. I should probably measure it to peas myself off more.