12/7/07

This could be the solution I'm looking for.

There's a commercial that's been on quite a bit lately for a sleep aid called Lunesta. Normally I don't pay much attention to these types of medical advertisements -- the Enzyte debacle notwithstanding -- but invariably with these sorts of things, in the last ten seconds some guy with a deep, barely audible voice runs through all of the horrible side-effects that they are probably required by law to tell you about, but don't really want you to know. Like the "fine print" at the end of a car dealership ad when they tell you (at auctioneer speed) that you're not really going to get the fantastical deal they just told you that you were going to get.

Anyway, as the requisite droning voice in the commercial was going on and on about how Lunesta can cause drowsiness (what? my sleep aid can cause drowsiness? WTF?), garbage mouth, light-headedness, heavy-headedness, periodic shooting of luna moths from random orifices, etc. -- something catches my ear.

I backed up my DVR just to make sure I heard it right. It said:

"Instances of sleepwalking and driving while asleep and later having no memory of these activities has been reported."

Sleep-walking, yeah I can see that, but sleep-driving? That is a pretty serious side-effect. They are telling me that I could quite possibly find myself waking up behind the wheel of my car in the parking lot at work and having no recollection of how I -- wait, that's a really bad example.

I went to their website for more information and they elaborated on this theme a little bit. They say you are supposed to "Call your doctor right away if after taking Lunesta you walk, drive, eat or engage in other activities while asleep."Maybe it's just me, but that sounds pretty cool. I'll bet I would get a lot more done.

And really, at that point, why call? Hell, I'm already out cruising around in my sleep. I'll just hit a Taco Bell drive-thru and stop over at his house. I'm sure he'll be glad to see me standing in his doorway in my Underoos at 2am chowing down on a chimichanga and snoring.

Also, "engage in other activities?"

Like what? A Badminton tournament? A 5K marathon? S&M rodeo sex at a highway rest stop?

I can picture the morning call:

Me: "Hello, Doctor Marten?"Doc: "Yes? What seems to be the problem?"Me: "I woke up this morning and apparently.... well, I think I painted my house in my sleep last night."Doc: "Oh my god! We've got to get you off that Lunesta right away!"Me: "Uh, can I wait one more night? My wife thinks it needs a second coat."

At any rate, this stuff sounds dangerous. If you take it, you might want to hide your car keys. And probably your paintbrush. Either that or just stop over and I'll let you paint my house.

Apparently there's been a rise in the number of people "making sexy time" in their sleep the last couple of years. Not sure if it's from sleeping drugs (err, I mean "sleep aids") but still something to watch out for!In other news, people taking the Parkinson's drug Mirapex have been cautioned to watch out for increased urges to gamble, have loads of sex, or engage in excessive shopping...

Double that with Requip and not only will be you be sleep eating and driving, but you'll develop a voracious sexual appetite and a gambling addiction. Almost makes one want little ants crawling around in their legs. Granted all some people have to do is cut their Haldol and they're good to go.

Ambien has the same warnings. Apparently there have been a number of cases where people have been prescribed these sleep drugs, then mysteriously gained 30-40 pounds the first month on the drugs...due to "sleep-eating" that they don't remember. Some reports even say that people wake up in jail, and they have to recollection of getting in their cars and getting in a major accident in the middle of the night. Now those are some serious side effects!!!

Someone already beat me to the Requip comment. But I felt the need to go and copy exactly what is says...

"Also tell your doctor if you experience new or increased gambling, sexual, or other intense urges while taking Requip. Side effects include nausea, drowsiness, vomiting, and dizziness. Most patients were not bothered enough to stop taking Requip."

I don't know, would I be bothered by increased gambling if I was WINNING? If I was losing mad cash at the tables, then maybe I'd think about going off the meds. But if I kept doubling down and winning....I think I'd take an extra dose.

Oh my God!!! I just realized what was wrong with the dim witted handyman who painted my bedroom wall, and I thought it was just his coke addiction!! Thanks for the heads up. He won't be back again...unless I have a craving for Taco Bell.

I took Ambien a Dr. prescribe for a long flight from LAX to Sydney. I popped one of those babies and out I went. 10 hours later I came to, somewhere over the Coral Sea, and as far as I knew, I could have been flying the Jumbo for those last 10 hours.

Funny you posted about this- I just saw a commercial for Ambien at 4 am yesterday when I gave up trying to sleep for the rest of the night. I also heard the disclaimer about sleep walking, driving, and eating. I began to wonder if you take it and lock yourself in your room before bed, if you'd remember doing so and unlock the door to let yourself out...maybe thoughts like this are why I can't sleep....

Ok, to be totally serious, I've taken Lunesta and Ambien (not at the same time!) and truly it knocks you out.

I'm not a snacker, but there's been nights that I've taken one of the pills and I wake up the next morning and there's dirty dishes and wrappers on the counter. I never thought that "sleep eating" existed until I started taking Lunesta and Ambien.

Oh my God!!! You are the only other person in the world (that I have discovered thus far anyway) that also like Meximelts!!!! I guess we are why they keep making them. Which is a good thing since that's all I like at Taco Bell.....

It's true...one can do incredibly wonderful (or stupid) things on Ambien or Lunesta. There is even Ambien-texting much like drunk-texting. Never had to suffer through sleep driving or sleep eating but I did order shoes in the middle of the night apparently. Makes for interesting talk the next morning...and even more interesting things in the middle of the night.

I've been taking this sleep aid for almost a month now.1. If I take it on an empty stomach I will experience jumble talk of a mad man about 20mins later. Very entertaining for others but a pain for me trying to get a point across.2. I've noticed a massive increase in the desire to eat cereal at night...say around 2am.3. My dreams have become so vivid that twice now I’ve smacked myself in the face after falling or dreamed of being attacked.4. The best for last. Sadly my ass seems to leak when I fart. Not just the typical I had a few hot wings or beer farts, but enough to draw some attention. Asspons might be considered if use of Lunesta continues.

i was on ambien for a few months the first few nights i fell asleep right away and felt great the next morning then it stopped putting me asleep then i had a party at my place had a few bags of trash sittin in my kitchen the next day and had to go to work got home said screw it ill take them out tomorrow took my ambien and i apparently cleaned my entire apartment including washing and putting away all my dishes dont remember a thing about it