Well, it is jolting to hear a candidate say something like that, but I know he loves those rhyming phrases. It’s sort of his trademark. Here are some examples from my own wide-ranging Cain interview, conducted in my imagination…

* * * * * * * * * *

Mr. Cain, could you comment on the Occupy Wall Street movement?

I strongly oppose those protesters. We need brokers, not jokers, and bankers, not wankers.

And what about the growing problem of homelessness?

We need poems, not homes…

And Mr. Cain, what about health care?

We need verses, not nurses.

I see. You’ve been very critical of the news media recently. Would you like to see all journalists forcibly sent overseas?

Yes. We need deporters, not reporters.

Mr. Cain, what about the idea that actress Uma Thurman would make a better candidate than yourself?

“Wankers” is most definitely a word not used often enough on the west side of the pond. It is such an awesome word. I would like to requisition our trans-Atlantic friends that we here in good ‘ole North America be allowed to add wanker(s) to our vernacular also. And I am willing to negotiate something in return. If there is a word or phrase that catches your ear lemme know and we can work something out!

What we need is pepperoni, not more baloney!
The English version:
What we need is Prince Chuckles, not pig knuckles.
The Australian version:
What we need is Kevin Rudd, not Elmer Fudd.
Although with that last one, it could be difficult to tell the difference.