It’s unclear why anyone would break the tradition established in critically-acclaimed boner flicks “Prison Shower 1” and “Return of The Nightstick“… I mean, who cares if Johnny’s costars Jack King and Sebastian Young are double-penetrating him with their actual dicks? You don’t fuck with a winning formula. The nightstick is timeless! The stuff legends are made of!

To further express my frustration, I leave you with this quote from Russian playwright Anton Chekhov: “If in the first few seconds of a Johnny Rapid scene, you have someone carrying a nightstick, then it should be shoved up his hungry boy-hole a few seconds later. Otherwise don’t put it there.”