Ah Jon, the duality of this public nature – there in lies the rub. On one side, you now know the cycles of a domicile full of your female acquaintances. On the other, however, you are provided the vital information to keep your schmeckle far away from the likes of Kathryn.

Ugh. Why is it I can picture Lindsay like that bitch from Twilight? ‘Oh, even the smell of his farts put me in heaven, and I wished that he was here with me now, yelling at me, treating me like utter shit, but being hot enough to justify this.’

Yeah, I hate to be a killjoy and all, but I don’t think I’d be so inclined to call them on their account hacking if they were actually funny hacks.
Regardless, I have couple friends who would really post status updates such as the last one, so I suppose they could all be “geniune oversharing fools” as wordpervert so eloquently put it.

I can’t take it anymore. I need dick ASAP! But my two year old wakes up every time. When he’s not around, my herpatitus flares up. On the brighter side, Justin Bieber and I are on the same menstrual cycle now. Super high fiveon that one. I would so lick him from his toes to his ass crack.

Speaking of licking toes, that is why you dont let your friends use your Iphone.

Ashley’s is code for: My confidence has taken a nose dive and I would like some attention please, but I know the only way I’m going to get that is by pretending I’m a massive slag so that all the facebook creeps come out of the woodwork. If I was to just put ‘Hey I’m sad and lonely cos I spend every evening sat in with my sprog’ my status would just be overlooked.