Pete Wentz Is Delusional

Shhh. Hear that? Close your eyes and listen real hard. It sounds like the desperate cries of millions of 14-year old girls the world over lamenting Island Records’ refusal to move the release date of Fall Out Boy’s new shitfest album one week forward! Wait…no. No, it’s just Fall Out Boy’s resident twink-in-training Pete Wentz crying over Island Records’ refusal to move the release date one week forward. You’d be surprised how alike they sound. Really.

Fall Out Boy bassist Pete Wentz told NME.com on Friday (January 26th) that the online leak of the band’s upcoming album, Infinity On High, two weekends ago could be “the worst leak in the history of music.” Wentz went on to say that it could also “potentially be one of the biggest leaks there is…every year computers, iPod, Internet music grows exponentially and we’re probably one of the biggest bands in rock music on the Internet.” Wentz said that the band had asked its label to move the album’s release date from February 6th to January 30th, but the company refused.

When asked if he thought the leak would affect the record’s sales, Wentz replied, “It’s undiscovered. A lot of people have told us we’re the last band that’s gonna sell records, a lot of people have told us we’re gonna be the first band who does this a different way.”

Stop. Just stop.

First of all, Pete, you’re not the last band that’s going to sell records. When you realize that the people telling you this are your mother, your underage MySpace friends, and the guys wrapped around your dick in hopes of tagging underage MySpace tail by association, you’ll realize that this is false. Secondly, sources tell me that this is far from “the worst leak in the history of music”. These sources, namely me, point out that this is based on the simple fact that neither myself nor anyone around me, has even heard of this album, let alone downloaded it.

This is the part where I was going to post one of the gag-tastic junk shots that our boy managed to circulate all over the internet last year, with some hilarious re-workings courtesy of MS Paint. But then I realized that would require me to search for and look at one of the gag-tastic junk shots that our boy managed to circulate all over the internet last year. So, in the effort of keeping this blog sexy, I leave you with this naughty swimmer. Me. Ow. Maybe next time, you lose the cap, eh?