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Saturday, February 4, 2012

Love is all you need

I know that I don't blog too often, but yesterday was such an exceptionally good day, that I wanted to share a bit of it with you. Yesterday was one of those days that is just so filled with love that my heart feels like it is going to explode with warmth and happiness. It was my husband's birthday yesterday and I think he had a great day, nothing extravagant, but lots of well wishes and people that called him, patients that said nice things to him etc. We had a nice lunch together and a busy day at the office. In the evening, it was a couples Bunko night because it is February and in honor of Valentine's Day. We had a cake and sang him happy birthday last night and there was silliness and fun.

Happy 55th Birthday, Victor.

Couple's Bunko happens twice per year.

So much of the love happened right at the end of the day, close to midnight. We got out of Bunko late and I picked Cassidy up from babysitting. She really wanted to see her boyfriend and I ran her by his house for a quick hug on the porch. Yes, I am sucker for love. She has it so bad, it's quite cute. Yesterday was all about The Lady and The Tramp and how much she thinks their story is similar. I watched her hug her boyfriend and was thinking about the future, wondering if they will make it, how long it would last. My daughter gets back in the car with me and continues talking to me about how much she loves her boyfriend and why, all the sweet things he says, she reads me his texts. We go to the grocery store to buy a cake for daddy's birthday and we get stuck reading all the sweet Valentines Day cards. I loved my time with Cassidy. It almost felt surreal. We actually sat in the car in the parking lot just talking. She tried to talk me into McDonald's, but I said no way, I draw the line there :)

Cassidy reading Valentine's Day Cards

When we got home, there were several kids waiting up for us. I went in the guest room to get tissue paper out of the closet and there were more girls in the guest room bed. Now, I had been getting this room ready for company on Sunday and didn't want the room to be used, I had washed all the bedding and had everything in there perfect. I had a split second of my stomach dropping and realizing I had not conveyed that the room was off limits enough, but I looked at the girls, one was sleeping, one was awake and I was so happy that they were there. I felt this overwhelming love flow through me that I haven't felt in a while. I often feel that that feeling must be the Holy Spirit. Whatever it is, it is rare for me to feel that encompassed and it just washed over me, so much warmth.

The ones awake sang Happy Birthday

More got out of bed for cake :)

After we sang happy birthday and the kids were getting ready to go to bed, I hugged every single child, mine and all the extras and I held them tight and told them how much I loved them. It was different last night. These kids are always yelling I love you to me and I yell it right back, but last night as I held each one of them, I thought about how much I do love them and I love having them here. This is their weekend haven. Some of the girls were commenting that they spend every weekend with us. I hadn't realized it, but it is true. I truly meant the I love you's last night and I felt my heart expand. The fact that we have more love in us and it doesn't diminish for the ones we already love is just incredible. What a gift we have, this capacity to love. Sometimes I feel like I have five kids, how could I have more, how could I love more, but last night just showed me how much our hearts can stretch and expand and make more room. Love is such a fantastic gift. It makes like worth living. I often say people and relationships are all that really matter, as I went to bed last night thinking of everyone in my life yesterday, all the friends, hugs, love, fantastic conversations, dynamic energy, joy, warmth, peace, calm, trust, all of those great emotions, I think I answered my own question that I had posed to a dear friend on Thursday. All of my life, I listen to my mind, I am so logical, thoughtful, my mind always wins. I have debated the topic of the mind over the heart many times. Last night, I figured I should just let my heart win the battle every once in a while.