June 25, 2014

What Does Soccer Have To Do With IndyCar?

IndyCar critics who squat on the Internet and continuously portend doom for the Verizon IndyCar Series seem to have concocted a brand new rant fashioned into a weapon with which to take swipes. The soccer World Cup being held in Brazil has been doing very well domestically in the television ratings 12+ overnight category. The big matches can draw anywhere from 10 to 25 million sets of eyeballs. It is well promoted, well positioned and has multiple network partners also engaged in heavy promotion.

Good for them. Many in the USA have hopped aboard a bandwagon that has had a huge worldwide presence for decades. My only involvement this year in the hoopla was eating lunch in a bar in New York City yesterday that had Uruguay and Italy on their big screens. About half the bar was Italian and the other half Uruguayan. Whenever something halfway exciting occurred one side or the other of the bar would shriek with delight. I just wanted my damned food and the check afterward. The only thing I found compelling and noteworthy (other than lousy service) was the fact that a stunningly gorgeous late-20-something Uruguayan woman was seated at the bar with a very loose fitting sleeveless shirt on and no bra underneath. I was continually distracted by a very nice looking breast that would emerge from the clothing with startling regularity.

The thing obsessed critics seem to be creaming their dungarees over are the high ratings for World Cup soccer, and how they are so much ‘better’ than those of IndyCar. How, even in the most stretched version of the alternate universe within which such kiddies dwell, did this become any sort of valid comparison? What happened to apples and apples instead of apples and bricks? Some of the same youngsters are even asking stupid questions like ‘what can IndyCar learn from the World Cup?’

Huh?

It is not difficult to come up with valid critique points for today’s IndyCar. But comparing it to soccer? Really? Comparing motor sports to a stick n’ ball sport? Evidently I am not retarded enough to make such an illogical leap. Perhaps one of the Einstein-like regulars can enlighten me with regard to any sort of point.

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But, but, but didn’t Tony promise IRL would be bigger than nascar & F1, or there wouldnt be a IRL anymore?Editor’s Note: No. He expressed optimism that it could be. His deadline passed without a cart-like failure and IndyCar is still here. And with a blue chip title sponsor.

IndyCar is international, right? Racing in Japan, Brazil, Canada…..why isnt that comparing apples to apples?Uh, soccer. Auto racing. Hello. If I wanted to watch slow movement down a field of play where nothing really happens for 90 minutes I would become a full time NASCAR fan.

Glad you enjoyed the breast slippage, where you able to control your bodily functions?Editor’s Note: Uh, yes. I did enjoy the scenery very much, however. It was ample and supple. Thanks for asking.

LOL. Tony did in fact promise that. Dig up the video, media stud.Editor’s Note: No thanks. I’ll take your word for it. Otherwise we might be subjected to several instances of defensive, inane commentary by the Anton-obsessed. If he did, he lied. But then he has been out of power for a few years and IndyCar continues beyond the deadline. And I do thank him for bringing F-1 into a convenient place to watch it until ol’ Bernie got greedier. Austin is nice but you gotta wonder how long that will last. Evidently ticket sales are underwhelming.

I live in country in northeastern Europe, where soccer is relatively unpopular. Ice-hockey, basketball are more preferred by the public. And most people also are not satisfied with typical slow paced soccer… I also changed my priorities. In 80ies being teenager – 1986 I watched World Cup in Mexico, not caring about B.Rahal`s win in previous month, even less, that “Royals” were World Series winners at the time. Most of info from USA, that I cared was like “Challenger” accident investigation Rogers comission report, etc.. as being enthusiast of “Space Shuttle” and space program as a whole.
Gradually, through “Payprus” PC sims I noticed, that racing in ovals is much more “pure” than on road courses. I began to watch, hm, CART, though as it was 1997-98 (more available on TV), but also IRL, when it was available. Also, although I preferred CART then (I liked Homestead, Michigan more than, for example, short tracks) but driver rosters in IRL – Roe, Boat, Dismore were quite interesting, I felt, that US drivers should be more presented…
In 2007 I began watch MLB, NFL – a year earlier, in a few years I had become almost “super expert” in those sports. I really preffer more statistical, short, but important play form of baseball and american football. Does it matter if ball is on the soccer field “it is live”, if nothing important happens? It is better to wait a pitch, knowing that at any moment there can be a hit. Or at least nice fly ball. The only game I have attended in real life is – baseball, he-he. There is really low level, below single A, baseball championship with 3 teams. And it is very enjoyable, a lot of hit balls to all directions, errors also, stolen bases, etc. I was surprised that it was more impressive than MLB on TV. I could really feel energy of the ball, the contact.
Also some kind of “Interleague” happens, when 4-5 teams from neighboring countries arrive to play.
So until the age of 33, I wasn`t fan of that, but it can change. Unfortunately many people are “slaves” of prejudices. F1, soccer rule, but Indy or baseball is for “those” americans…
About F1 – very important that people seem not to notice – almost complete lack of colors. Yeah, look at those gray, black, gray, sometimes white liveries… Are they crazy, what`s going on? I watch F1 occasionally, I can`t tell the cars apart – with some lighting, fog it’s all monochrome. In Indycar everything is obvious in a few seconds – yellow DHL Hunter-Reay, light blue-white Hinchcliffe.
I still watch World Cup’s, now I am able to rewind, go forward to see some moments, so that’s less boring. I just began to think – penalty point must be moved backwards, to make chances a bit higher for a goalie, but…
then i remember why not to use coach challenges, video replays, like in NFL… NFL is light years ahead… also I think – the same soccer goalie stands usually all the time – unlike pitchers, when I think, which reliever will go out to play, maybe setup-man if it’s 8th inning…

You’re absolutely correct in that, while overwhelmingly a sport played by the youth of the US, futbol nonetheless infinitely more popular than Indycar. A more proper comparison would be with team handball, water polo and badminton.Editor’s Note: I suppose it would if someone was mentally impaired.

By the way, will your tittilating prose appear in next month’s “Girls of Assisted Living” issue of Penthouse?Editor’s Note: I assume you are trying for some sort of humor. Might try being less obtuse in the future. Oh, and it’s ‘titillating.’ Spell check is your friend, particularly if you are interested in being taken seriously.

I suspect based on your past comments that you are probably not a fan of Ann Coulter. But her recent article on the world cup and soccer is priceless and right on.

If promoters can make a sport like soccer more popular (perhaps the most boring and dull sport out there today), Indycar has no excuse to be struggling as it is.Editor’s Note: I’ll have to look it up….I do not normally read her except mainly to watch the reaction of those who she aggravates, but her take on soccer might be interesting. NPR also has an interesting piece on pre- and post-millenials and why it may suddenly be so popular. It helps when you have major networks in your pocket. NBC, for example. They would deny this, but having spent millions on rights for the World Cup I sense there is pressure to get ROI, and that pressure drives other departments, like News, to fawn over it. Why else would a sporting even in Brazil get daily detailed coverage on Nightly News, Today, etc.? I think NBC wants to elevate this to Olympic-like levels.

Editor’s Note: In order to prevent what has become tedious redundancy on your part, I combined two separate comments into one. At least you stayed on topic.
Unfortunately,you stated it was on NBC.Editor’s Note: Actually, I didn’t. I did state ‘It helps when you have major networks in your pocket. NBC, for example.’ The implication, predictably, sailed right over your head. NBC HAS spent handsomely on things like Premier League and MLS (helpful hint: same sport) and naturally they want to maximize their investment by coat-tailing. Since you are the only kid raising a ruckus my assumption is that you are the only one who doesn’t get it.

Try to be a bit better informed next time, Sherlock. Since you’ve already altered your post, it’s clear you had no clue about this. Hysterically funny.Editor’s Note: So not only is your lack of basic reading comprehension skill on display you are also delusional. What I wrote originally is what was published; unchanged in any way. Suggestion: Take off the tin foil hat and learn how to read.

You said “NBC, for example. They would deny this, but having spent millions on rights for the World Cup I sense there is pressure to get ROI, and that pressure drives other departments, like News, to fawn over it.” Sherlock, indeed.Editor’s Note: Note to self…in the future, explain in spectacularly granular detail up front every subtle meaning for those who are impaired/conspiracy theorists. Here’s something called ‘context’ for you. The word ‘they’ in the context of my comment reply refers to networks that actually spent millions. We are all well aware of the entities that own carriage rights. The feeding frenzy involves not just NBC’s evening news, it is also Fox, CBS and a host of other cable news or sports networks, most of whom do not have rights to carry games, not to mention rights holders ABC, ESPN and Univision. It is also not just Today. It is GMA, whatever CBS has on this week in the morning, etc. In the case of NBC, they are employing a tactic called ‘coat-tailing’ in which they emphasize coverage for an event they do not own the rights to. NBC would, in fact, like to acquire full carriage rights and turn World Cup into an Olympics-like recurring event. They already have the infrastructure. There is also a reason why they have correspondents and crews in Brazil. They also want to maximize ROI for their ongoing investment in Premier League and MLS. Considering the ethical shadiness of FIFA it will be interesting to see what happens. All that said I am quite sure that will also sail over your noggin so I will just remind myself to write like a second grader. Perhaps employ ‘Dick and Jane’ type story telling. In any event, thanks for your rapt attention.

Its important to know and understand IRLs numerous past failures so that those efforts are not repeated. The number one mistake ever made was Tony George. The number 2 was treating Indy as more important than the rest of the races. Explaining that point: While it might be wonderful and special to win Daytoner or Monaco, it doesn’t overshadow the rest of the series. With IRL, its allllll about Indy, and has proven to be a major problem.Editor’s Note: One might think your kind would eventually learn, particularly after two very nasty episodes of bankruptcy and self immolation, that without a strong marquee event the series is far less likely to survive. One thing NASCAR and and even F-1 has is some level of consistency year to year. With the Verizon IndyCar Series the only consistent thing has been Long Beach in April and the 500 in May. But even with a consistent schedule the marquee should be the highlight, especially since it has been around longer than anything else; e.g., twice as long as Daytona. So common sense dictates making the 500 as strong as it can be, but find someone to spread the magic through the course of a season. Three weeks off in June won’t accomplish that.

So, you agree qith me. LOLEditor’s Note: Unsure how you leaped to that conclusion, but hardly surprising. In the blog I chided Malsher for taking kind of a dick approach and asking gratuitous questions that led to corporate speak, and O’Donnell for flapping his yap but not really saying anything. Hardly the kind of sweeping indictment of Hulman Racing for which your loins seem to moisten.