Relative resources: “According to this perspective, the more resources or power a person has in relation to his or her spouse,” said Forste, “the easier it should be to bargain one’s way out of routine housework.” Thus, if a man makes more money than his wife, the implicit (or explicit) agreement is that he should not have to do as much housework. However, research shows that, even when women are equal to men in terms of what they bring in, they do more housework.

Time availability: Since time is a resource, the amount of time spouses or partners work outside the home would seem to have a direct impact on their share of housework. It doesn’t have as much as an effect as one would think, though.

Awareness: Men are not always aware when it is necessary to do housework.

Forste encourages men and women to “view [housework as] regular maintenance, rather than women’s work, [which will] change how we share the load and how we think about it.”

This post is twenty-fourth in a series of videos available in our new BYU Social Sciences YouTube channel! The channel contains tidbits of many of our most popular lectures and useful, succinct, research-backed advice on relationship, political, religious, media, and financial issues. Follow us there to stay up-to-date on wisdom that will help you and your family live better lives.

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BYU’s College of Family, Home, and Social Sciences is all about connections—in and between families, societies, political systems, lands, and even between the past and the present! That’s why we call our annual magazineConnections. And we want to connect better with you! We want to learn about some of the unique ways that you connect, and not just with your WiFi. Connections can be made in many different ways and with many different things or people. Doing family history can connect you with your ancestors. Rotating weekly cooking arrangements that let you eat together can connect you with your roommates. Taking a morning walk every day may be your key for reconnecting with nature. Connections are everywhere! Show us who or what you connect with on our Instagram page (@byufhss), and you could win some amazing prizes, like a $50 Visa gift card (that you can use anywhere) or a $30 gift basket from the BYU Store!

“My Connections” Instagram Photo Contest

Your photo should depict a connection of some kind. You may choose to focus on a connection with

your community

your heritage

your education

your environment

your family

your friends or roommates

Like our page to see all the photos submitted last year. Think outside of the box and be creative. You may not even recognize something you do as a means of connection until you take the time to stop and think. Two winners will be chosen. Each individual may enter one photo to the contest. The photo must be an original one you took.

To Be Eligible For This Contest You Must:

You don’t have to be a BYU student to enter, but you do need to post only BYU-appropriate content.

How to Enter the Contest:

Post a picture on Instagram, between November 23rd and December 2 with the following:

A caption that describes the significance of the photo and how what is happening in the photo helps you connect

Tag @byufhss

Include #byufhssconnect in the caption

Encourage your followers to vote for your picture between December 5th and 7th.

Contest Timeline:

Entries will not be accepted after 11:59 p.m.on December 2nd.

Voting: On Monday, December 5th, five of the best photos will be chosen and announced on our @byufhss Instagram page. This decision will be based on creativity, aesthetic appeal, and relevance to the theme. Popular voting, which will be done by liking or commenting on the photos, will begin on this day.

Voting will determine 1st and 2nd place out of the top five, and will be based on the number of likes each photo receives. “Likes” will ONLY be counted on the photos on the FHSS Instagram (“likes” on individual Instagram accounts will not be considered). Voting will take place between Monday, December 5thand will go until Wednesday, December 7th at10:00 p.m.

Winners: 1st and 2nd place winners will be announced onThursday, December 8th!

Prizes:

1st place: a $50 Visa Gift Card (think: Christmas shopping done!)

2nd place: a $30 finals survival kit full of goodies from the BYU Store

*Note: by submitting a photo and entering the contest, the entrant affirms that it is his or her original work, and gives the BYU College of Family, Home, and Social Sciences permission to use it in any of its various communications channels, including but not limited to the annual Connections magazine. You will be given credit.

**This post’s feature photo was last year’s second-place winner

Let’s get gramming!

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The question of how to balance family and career responsibilities, if we’re mothers, or if we’re not, how we support those that do, is often deeply personal but also quite common. We also frequently ask ourselves, if we’re parents, how to raise our children so that they are productive and altruistic. The answers to those questions are also quite often both complicated but universal. Various female members of our School of Family Life faculty will talk about what they’ve found works best, in their lives and in their research, and invite you to chat with them in real-time and on-line, in conjunction with the release of their latest magazine.

Called Family Connections, the latest issue of the magazine shares the example of alum-turned-professors Laura Padilla-Walker, Chris Moore, and Erin Holmes, as well as those of other alumni who are making a difference in the world today, and discussion of raising “prosocial” children. SFL alumni are invited to request to join the SFL Alumni Page BYU SFL Alumni Connect, if they haven’t already been included. Then get online on

Friday, August 4th

6-7 p.m.

If you’re already a member, comment below with the kinds of questions or topics you’d like to see addressed. There will be a drawing for a $50 VISA gift card at the end of the discussion; all chat participants are eligible.

Panelists:*

Erin Holmes

In 1998, Erin Holmes graduated with honors from BYU and went on to get her masters in 2001 at the University of Delaware, eventually obtaining a Ph.D. from the University of Texas at Austin in 2006. While going through her doctorate program, Holmes became pregnant with her first child.

As you can imagine, she faced the very difficult choice of continuing her studies or being a stay-at-home mom. Unsure of which was the right decision, she turned to the scriptures. In Isaiah 40: 31 Holmes read: “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” After that, the choice was clear: continue with her education.

With aid from family and friends, she was able to complete her degree and was offered a teaching position at BYU. Since then, she has had two more children and continues to balance her work as a professor while being a mother to her three children

Laura Padilla-Walker

Professor Walker obtained her BS in 1999 from Central Michigan University, her MS from University of Nebraska-Lincoln in 2001, and her PhD from the same university in 2005. As a working mother, she understands the difficulties of successfully managing both a career and children.

However, Walker finds the experience enriching; when asking her daughter of her desired career choice, the girl replied, “when I grow up I want to have a job like yours and work part-time and spend most of my time with my kids.” Walker adds, “That is success to me because she is not aware of how much I work; she just knows that I am present when I am home with her.” Through her actions, she shows that balancing work and a family is something that can be accomplished.

Chris Moore

Chris Moore knew early in life that obtaining an education was paramount. When she was young, one of her great grandmothers told her: “Christine, you cannot rely on a man to take care you, so I am going to give you some money and you are going to college!”

By the age of 50, Moore had one Bachelor’s degree, two Masters, and a Ph.D. Before becoming the director of the Family and Consumer Sciences Education program, she taught junior high. Throughout both of these careers, Moore has been a positive example to all who come in contact with her.

So, be sure to join us on Facebook on August 4th from 6-7 pm to learn just how these ladies do it- and how you can do it too. We hope to “see” you there!

*Panelists may change.

How do you balance the responsibilities in your life?

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Social media is now an essential fiber in the thread of most adolescents’ social life. Kids and teens use social media everywhere. They use it at home, on the road, and even at baseball games. Although it is impossible to be absolutely certain that your kids are free from social threats on their social sites, parents can take some small and simple steps to secure some online safety for their kids and peace of mind for themselves.

One of the leading experts in teen social media use, Marion K. Underwood, visited BYU campus two weeks ago to present her findings on the subject. She suggests that parents:

Follow Their Kids

If you don’t have a social media account, get one! Your children can benefit from knowing that you will see what things they post, and some of what will be shared with them. Being your child’s friend and follower is a simple way to stay aware of what they experience, and even show you care.

Also, make sure to be more than a passive observer of social media content. Participate! Post, like, and comment on different material. Being a more active participant in social media will help you understand where your child is coming from. Dr. Underwood, as she received likes and responses to her personal social media content, recounted, “I was amazed at how thrilled I was.” She now has a better understanding of what her children feel as they participate in social media conversations.

Experiences like these will help you to empathize with your child. “By creating your own account and joining these platforms,” says Underwood, “You will understand the power of digital communication in a way you never thought possible.”

Take Away Phones at Night

“85% of the students in [our] study said they slept with their [phones] under their pillows so they could hear an incoming text message in the middle of the night. Disruption in sleep is terrible for adolescents,” said Underwood.

Further, when teens are alone in their rooms, they are more likely to subject themselves to negative content, which is widely available on all platforms. Making this quick rule will lessen the likelihood of teens dwelling on negative messages.

Set Specific Guidelines for Specific Situations

“I think we all need to structure our homes and our children’s time to avoid over-involvement with social media,” says Underwood. She suggests at least two ideas:

No phones during meals.

“[This includes] family meals at home, at restaurants, that includes parents – everybody has to put their phones away.”

No phones in the car.

“A rule that I had when I would miss my work time to drive children around in carpools was ‘no phones in the car,’ said Underwood. “If I’m spending my time to take my young ladies places, I wanted them to converse with me. So I would say, you’re not going to look at your phone . You’re going to talk about your day. And every family can come up with their own set of guidelines.”

Further, children and teens are capable of doing a lot of good on their various platforms. Encouraging children to engage in pro-social behavior on social media can be beneficial to overall mental health and well-being.

Setting these kinds of boundaries doesn’t absolutely assure that your home’s parent-child interaction will be full of green pastures, but it does mean that family stability will more easily prevail over the outside social world.

Talk Openly

Social media is a big deal to your kids. “Online experiences [are] vitally important to…students,” Underwood said. “When we asked them what was more important, their offline social experiences or their online experiences, they said online social experiences were more important in their lives.”

“I’m not a big fan of monitoring software,” says Underwood, “Young people are very smart about how to get around it and platforms change all the time. Our best hope of influencing their online conduct – their online experience, is to use our relationships to discuss with them.”

Invite Children to Help

Children and teens can help you to help them. Dana Boyd, author of It’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens wrote: “What makes the digital street safe is when teens and adults collectively agree to open their eyes and pay attention, communicate, and collaboratively negotiate difficult situations.”

“Teens need the freedom to wander the digital street, but they also need to know that caring adults are behind them and supporting them wherever they go.”

You can have a positive influence on your children. It is never too late to begin implementing guidelines for a positive social media experience.

You can view Dr. Underwood’s full lecture here:

What guidelines do you have in YOUR home for social media use?

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BYU’s College of Family, Home, and Social Sciences is all about connections—in and between families, societies, political systems, lands, and even between the past and the present! That’s why we call our annual magazine Connections. And we want to connect better with you!

We want to learn about some of the unique ways that our audience members connect, and not just with their wi-fi! Connections can be made in many different ways and with many different things or people. Doing family history can connect you with your ancestors. Rotating weekly cooking arrangements that let you eat together can connect you with your roommates. Taking a morning walk every day may be your key for reconnecting with nature. Connections are everywhere!

Show us who or what you connect with, in Instagram, and you could win some amazing prizes!

“My Connections” Contest Description:

“My Connections” is a photo contest through FHSS’s Instagram page. Your photo should depict a connection of some kind. You may choose to focus on a connection with

your community

your heritage

your education

your environment

your family

your friends or roommates

Or something else. Think outside of the box and be creative. You may not even recognize something you do as a means of connection until you take the time to stop and think. Three winners will be chosen. Each individual may enter one photo to the contest. The photo must be an original one you took.

To Be Eligible For This Contest You Must:

You don’t have to be a BYU student to enter, but you do need to post only BYU-appropriate content.

How to Enter the Contest:

Post a picture on Instagram with the following:

A caption that describes the significance of the photo and how what is happening in the photo helps you connect

Tag @byufhss

Include #byufhssconnect in the caption

Contest Timeline:

Enter: You may enter the contest at anytime between Monday, November 30th and Wednesday, December 9th. Entries will not be accepted after midnight on December 9th.

Top Five: On Friday, December 11th the top five photos will be announced through the FHSS Instagram account (@byufhss). This decision will be based on creativity, aesthetic appeal, and relevance to the theme. Each of the top five photos will be posted onto the FHSS Instagram account exactly as it was entered. **Please note: By entering the contest, you give us permission to share your photo. You will be given credit.

Voting: Voting will determine 1st and 2nd place out of the top five. It will be conducted through the FHSS Instagram account and will be based on the number of likes each photo receives.”Likes” will ONLY be counted on the photos on the FHSS Instagram (“likes” on individual Instagram accounts will not be considered). Voting will take place between Friday, December 11th and will go until Sunday, December 13th at midnight.

Winners: 1st and 2nd and place winners will be announced on Monday, December 14th!

Prizes:

1st place: a $50 Visa Gift Card (think: Christmas shopping done!)

2nd place: a $30 finals survival kit full of goodies from the BYU Bookstore

Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

*Note: by submitting a photo and entering the contest, the entrant affirms that it is his or her original work, and gives the BYU College of Family, Home, and Social Sciences permission to use it in any of its various communications channels, including but not limited to the annual Connections magazine.