All we talk about are the drawbacks. Always. All the time. Of everything.

But I am an optimist who thought, thank God, cows don’t fly! And a woman who really enjoys her own wiles, appeal and different thinking while appreciating the God-given beauty in men and their raw sex appeal, not limited to their broad shoulders and bums only.

So, today I’m going to talk about the advantages of being a woman in a male-dominated society.

I’m not talking about a generalized idea, nor saying this society is right but am trying to make the best of a situation that already exists, till it changes, and I do believe in Gender Equality. And this post should make the men hope and wish for it too. This idea is mine and how I look at the society and my life, and how I can make it a win-win situation. My observation alone.

If at the age when everyone is trying to get you off married, and it is the last thing you want, or you can get married but want to have a career too, all a woman needs to do is convince the parties concerned, whose opinions matter, who have a say, to agree to you having a career. And then have any damn career you want.

The advantage? You can follow something in life, become or do just because you want to. ‘Want’ is enough, it is the word. Not because you have to. Think about it. You are not required to be the bread-earner in the family by the norms of the society itself. You can do anything you want without thinking about the money you are raking in. After all, that is the job of your husband or the one-to-be and not your responsibilty. Has anyone ever thought what failure does to a man in the society? He is supposed to earn. Anyhow. He has to. Whether he likes it or not. He just can’t quit something because he does not enjoy, is brow-beaten if he already doesn’t have a equally good or better offer on his hands. Responsibilty is drilled into them from when they are aware of what the word entails. And all they can think of is the money they bring home, rarely of what they want to be in life. Where is that privilege? And they only have been taught, by example not to take anything from their female counterparts.

Partially I feel sorry for them and then I think, it was them or their ancestors who made it this way. And so I say, if I can’t have equality, I might as well enjoy the benefits of the existing inequality.

It is not easy for women to excel in men-dominated fields and careers. We face resistance from only those men who have a secret fear of being upped in their minds. But we have more tenacity and are more stubborn than any man in the world. And we have nothing to lose. And there is nothing as fearsome as someone with nothing to lose. That’s why i believe we can also up them if it comes down to either-or and/or a case of comparison for them. Plus, we are pretty good too, at most things we do.

I, for one, have no intention of being the bread-earner. I’ll put up my feet, make the bed, cook at home and blog when I feel like not working. And then when I feel like going back to a laboratory, I’ll very well do so. I have plans that when I work, all my earnings will go towards buying shoes and clothes and cars, all the luxury items! And so I have told my fiancé.

Sadly, he is one of those men who are liberal and independent thinkers, who have no problem if their wives earn more than them. He is very successful himself but he broke down all my well-planned, to-be-executed ideas when I saw him be the happiest when I did well, better than most. He is one who would relocate because I got an offer that shouldn’t be refused, just to be near me. And he makes the bed, though as a connoisseur of good food, he needs me to do the cooking, but the heating is left to him.

And dang he is smart, smart enough to tell me I will want toneed tohaveto earn if I want to have that Porsche. Always that is the bait hanging over my head…

But still, my notions were pretty cool, considering…. I just didn’t count on being as lucky.

N.B. My ideas were good, weren’t they? Making the best of a poor situation. G.:)

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About Guria

An Artist in Science - I am a Misfit 'cause I choose to be one. "Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform" And I am a Maverick, because, I'm... umm... brilliant?

20 Responses to Why I Like being a Woman in a Patriarchal Society

Someone's fiction is somebody's reality you know…but life is such that it could be the reverse as well – quite not a 2 + 2 =4 as most would vouch. Yet we continue to dream..the only common thread between the have's and have not's…what comes of it no one really knows…

You dont have to be the bread winner for the family but I think its a must for a women to be independent. She can actually be independent and have some laid back time and have fun. Its i guess the bright side for us ;).

umm, i agree with most of it but not with the whole. Well, if you talk about aspirations, don't you think that even us need to stand their test…may not be bread earner but may be giving up her career choice because of her family since its not considered civil in this male dominated society. a friend of mine wanted to be a model, another a dancer. Both of them are now pursuing something very much different as their families didn't agree with their choices. :-). But then again I suppose these are the aspirations that even men might need to fulfill (read, you have to be a doctor!)

In some UN report I read (do not remember exact reference 😦 sorry!) that in the world 65% of families get enough food because women in those families earn .. where women are bread winners!

even for those women who 'do not work outside' why we assume that they don't count is the aspect I have never understood..

with the prices going up and many women having to manage house single handedly (by choice/by force/by destiny…), women have to be breadwinners.

i fully agree though that we have to see the positive side of life too.. there is too much of complaining from those who don't have to complain .. and those who have much to complain are taking it in right spirit and fighting..

@Gyanban: I have no idea what you meant by what you said! As far as what I wrote, it is neither fiction nor reality nor dreams! 😛

@Neha: Rather than writing my heart out, I kinda' bashed my (own) brians out!To tell the truth, there's a thrill in bringing money home but I'd rather bring it in for the luxuries than the common bread!! 😀Love ya, babes! 🙂

@Paushali: Your point had crossed my mind, and is damn valid but I was actually trying very hard to find something good out of the whole fiasco that exists! 😛But I have had another brainwave regarding this…. how about doing a prim and proper degreee to mplease the afmily, then sprout wings, become independent, fly away and be whatever you want! 😀Actually, this reason was why I mentioned “convince the parties concerned”…. :))But what you say 100% correct! :))

@Harini: That is one given! And once you earn money, you will be independent… What I meant by the post is we can be more casual as a high-earning job with neat packages are not mandatory for us! so no pressures! :))

@Bikram: Ahhh, that's the reaction I wanted! Optimism in colors, wouldn't you agree! 😀I'm glad you saw the fun-side! :))Thanks!

@Rashmi: Thank you, sweetheart! :))

@Mahesh: If written by a boy, depeneds on how he tackles the problem… if they can keep the go out and of course, if the readers can too. :))Thank you!

@Avada: Absolutely! independence is a must! :))I actually have shifted from DISQUS to Blogger comments and it seems I have lost the previous ones… hopefully I'll get them back! 😛 :))

@Durga: Welcome to MM! :))Yeah, it feels good to be a part-bread winner too, but by the rules of the society it is not mandatory hence even in this biased norms, my optimism sparks! 😀Thanks for your comment! See ya' around! 🙂

@aativas: That is so true! I had missed that point though I'm aware of it. It happens mostly in the lower classes where the men are mstly good-for nothings and bad-in-many-things… And agree to that too why home-making is not counted as work just because there is no moolah involved. But this post was a funny post about my optimistic views in not so nice a s ociety! :))Thanks, it is always a treat to see you here. :))

@Makk: I disagree… women like me are rare! 😀I don't enjoy inequality, never, not at all but am smart enough to use situations to my advantages! 😀But very very honestly, inequality has no privileges… I tried very hard to find one and this is the only warped one I found.

@BK Chowla: A deep insight from an Insightful man! Thank you, Sir. 🙂

@Rajlakshmi: I am glad you have all your wishes. :))

@Aditya: Leave it to you to bring it down to the lowest denominator. But I also think, Guys are beautiful and girls, weird! 😉

@Chatterbox: Thank you! 😀And I agrre to that last about independence whole-heartedly! :))

@The West Wind: Thank you so so so much for that award! Honored!! :))

@The Holy Lama You hit thenail on my head err.. I mean hit the nail on its head!! 😀Thanks and a hearty Welcome to MM! :))

Hii, Me and some of my frnds hv started an E-magazine called Reader's Quotient it is totally for a noble cause of funding education to needy children, just wanted to ask if u shall be interested to come along with usIf yes pls contact us at sangeeta.goswami@readersquotient.comWaiting for ur revert