Thursday, January 21, 2016

Thursday

(Palin endorses The Donald.)

Yesterday, I made chicken for dinner. I fried the bird using generous amounts of salt and grease. It came out all brown and salty and crisp. My son loved the meal. He raved about my mad kitchen skills. I washed the vittles down with two bottles of Jinro soju. In South Korea, a large man can get fall-down drunk for less than five dolla. You can't beat that.

I listened to The Howard Stern Show. The featured guest was Bigfoot. The poor man's a paranoid schizophrenic with an extremely low IQ. Bigfoot claimed that he fingered his mailman's anus for a fee of fifty dollars. The segment was very funny. But I felt kind of guilty. Stern's a sharp dude. Picking on a mentally ill dullard seems a tad exteme. Yet I must be honest. I laughed so hard that I nearly pissed my pants. Oh well. What's a boy to do?

I paid homage to the Christ God. I said the Lord's Prayer on bended knees. No big surprise. I'm not some dirty pagan. I asked the Savior to grant me patience. The Dragon Lady left me again. She went into another rage and tried to break all the furniture. I'm not sure if her outrageous anger was sparked by Graves' Disease or mental illness. But I no longer care. I need a break. There's only so much that a man can stomach.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. I dreamed that my apartment was under the control of a beautiful woman. She had golden hair and a bright smile. The wench killed Clint Eastwood with her bare hands. She snapped him like a twig. Her behavior scared me.

I woke up at 6 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the paper while enjoying a bathroom break. A man from Incheon beat his seven-year-old son to death. After that, he dismembered the poor boy. It took two years for the police to find the child's corpse. The police on the peninsula are pretty useless. Plus Korea has very lax truancy laws. A student can drop out of school without any consequences. Teachers and care-givers keep their noses out of family business. So tragedy strikes from time to time.

I turned on CNN. Sarah Palin endorsed Donald Trump for president. She claims that he's the man to turn the nation around. I agree with her. Sarah's son recently got arrested for beating up his girlfriend. But I don't hold his bad behavior against the former governor. Shit happens. And there are more glad-tidings for Trump. Ted Cruz is in a lot of trouble. Iowa's governor recently turned his back on the candidate. The Donald could possibly run the table.