I have a rock hard body. Doctors tell me I should probably stop
eating rocks so much. I say "Fuck you doctors! This is my body and
I'll do what I want!" Then they respect my total dedication to
bodliness so we laugh and high five and I eat granite.

That I'm fairly tall (6'1-6'2 depending on the day), that I can
(and will) talk about anything and everything, that I'm the least
photogenic person they've ever met and am much more attractive in
person.

Movies: Star Wars (New Hope, Empire, and Jedi), Batman: Mask of the
Phantasm, Big Trouble in Little China, Young Frankenstein, Monty
Python and the Holy Grail, The House of The Devil, The Lion King,
Muppet Treasure Island, Black Dynamite, Black Swan, Brick, Fido,
Oldboy, Dogtooth, Wet Hot American Summer, High Fidelity, The
Avengers, Back to the Future (Parts 1 and 2), Beasts of the
Southern Wild, Guardians of the Galaxy, anything by Adam
Wingard.