Behind the Garden Gate

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Punctuating dialogue

I’m consistently seeing submissions with problems in
punctuating dialogue. By consistently, I mean it’s rare for me to see dialogue
properly punctuated. If you think this could be you, you’re in good company.
Some of these manuscripts were good enough to rate an automatic contract offer.
A few punctuation problems alone will not turn me off an otherwise good story.
However, proper punctuation makes an awfully good impression on a reviewing
editor, so today’s post is on punctuating dialogue.

DIALOGUE TAGS Most writers know how to punctuate the
basic unit of dialogue using a dialogue tag, like he said. Enclose the spoken line in double quotation marks and
separate the dialogue tag from the spoken line with a comma. If the dialogue
tag follows the spoken line, the comma goes inside the closing quote mark.

EXAMPLE: “I’ve come to fix your satellite antenna,”
she said.

If the dialogue tag comes first, the comma is right
after the tag, outside the quote marks, and the final period is inside the
closing quote mark.

EXAMPLE: She said, “I’ve come to fix your satellite
antenna.”

If the dialogue tag interrupts the spoken line, put
a comma inside the first closing quote mark and after the dialogue tag.

EXAMPLE: “I’ve come,” she said, “to fix your
satellite antenna.”

ACTION TAGS Using action tags instead of dialogue
tags makes a richer, more active piece of writing. Action tags link more
character information to the spoken line and create pictures in the reader’s
mind. Action tags can precede, follow, or interrupt the spoken line, but each
of these options comes with its own problems in punctuation.

Dialogue tags use words that involve making sound,
like said, asked, or replied. Action
tags can show almost any action, but do not involve making sounds, so, unlike
dialogue tags, action tags are not connected to the spoken line with a comma. Treat
the spoken line and the action tag as two separate sentences. When the action
tag precedes or follows the spoken line, separate the two with a period.

EXAMPLE: “It’s right over there on the porch roof.”
I pointed toward the veranda.

When the action tag interrupts the spoken line,
that’s when punctuation can get wonky. Use emdashes to show interruption. When
the spoken line and the action occur simultaneously, place the emdashes around
the action tag outside the quote marks. Don’t put a comma at the end of the
first section of dialogue because there’s no pause in the speech.

EXAMPLE: “It’s right over there”—I pointed toward
the veranda—“on the porch roof.”

If the spoken line breaks off and then the action
occurs, put the emdash at the place where the speech breaks off inside the
closing quote mark. Treat the action tag as a separate sentence.

EXAMPLE: “How are you gonna—” I caught sight of her
truck. “Oh, you brought your own ladder.”

If the spoken line trails off or hesitates, then
resumes, show this with suspension points (ellipsis). Treat the action tag as a
separate sentence.

EXAMPLE: “Are you sure you’re okay…” She hoisted the
ladder off the truck. “…by yourself?”

These few examples will cover most forms of
dialogue. If you can get these right, your editor will be very grateful!