'Girls' Premiere: Road Trips, Rehab and Relationship Woes (Oh My)

Girls is back on HBO (and on YouTube, for the premiere, at least). The two-part Season 3 premiere caught us up, to varying degrees, on our four main girls. For once, Hannah's life might actually be the most together, which might sound like a sign the Girls' universe is imploding on itself, but it works, somehow.

As usual, Lena Dunham is masterful at setting the emotional scene from the get-go, and the first Season 3 shot of each girl sets the stage perfectly for where she's at in life. Hannah is in bed, but we don't know with whom at first. As is so often the case, the couples' faces are the last thing we get to see. The scene opens on a cute footsie tangle and pans up to reveal (drumroll, please): Adam. Of course, it's Adam. It had to be Adam, right? And, what's more, it seems like their relationship is the healthiest it's ever been (not that that's such a difficult feat). He's living with her and helping her manage her OCD by making sure she takes her medication. It's actually kind of adorable.

Next up is Marnie, who we knew wasn't going to be cuddling in bed with Charlie, thanks to Christopher Abbott's publicized exit from the series last spring. What we didn't know was how Marnie would be taking the break-up and where she would be now. The answer, as it turns out, is curled up on her mom's couch in New Jersey under some fabulous vintage Rainbow Brite sheets. In case this doesn't paint the picture for you, Marnie is not taking the break-up well.

Shoshanna has not taken Ray back. Nope, she's waking up in the top bunk of a dorm bed, and apparently getting more and more comfortable with her sexuality, seeing as the guy's roommate is gchatting in the bunk below.

And then there is Jessa, who we haven't seen since she ditched Hannah on a weekend trip to her parents' last season. While everyone else is just waking up, Jessa is already out of bed and working as hard as Jessa ever works. She's washing dishes, but, in true Jessa fashion, she decides to fuck it and throws one particularly crusty piece of glassware in the trash.

And those opening moments really sum up where each girl is in her life.

Hannah is happier and more well-adjusted than we've ever seen her. She has a handle on her OCD and is back on her editor's good side. He loves the fact that she was derailed by mental illness because that's fantastic fodder for her books. He can work with that. She and Adam are happy. Of course, there is a minor run-in with Adam's ex, Natalia (Shiri Appleby), but he deserved it after he freaked her out sexually and then disappeared.

Marnie is a wreck. She's reeling from her break-up with Charlie (he dumped her, and we know how great she is at dealing with rejection), and living at home with her mother. She has a job at Grumpy's and is getting a new apartment in the city, but all signs point to a major meltdown at the time of the breakup.

Shoshanna is getting the college experience we all knew she needed. She's sleeping with guys her own age and has developed a very Shosh-like plan of attack for senior year, with structured and alternating times for fun and study to make sure she gets the most out of both sides of the experience.

And Jessa, she's in rehab, somewhere in the middle of nowhere (presumably upstate New York?) and doing her damnedest to get kicked out, since she's only there so her grandmother will give her a plane ticket, money and a pair of Uggs. She succeeds in getting kicked out, berating her fellow patients and outing one former abuse victim, only to later go down on her.

The first episode of the two-part premiere, "Females Only," caught us up on everyone, but episode two, "Truth or Dare," saw Hannah, Adam and Shoshanna take a road trip to pick up Jessa, who says she needs someone to sign her out of rehab. Here's what we learn on the road trip:

1. Marnie feels left out. When Hannah talks to her from the road, she lies briefly before admitting what's really going on. Marnie feels left out and verbalizes her feelings because, well, this is Girls. I smell a theme for the season a-brewing.

2. Adam should probably give Jessa a good talking to. Not only does he spew some words of wisdom to Marnie at Hannah's dinner party, but he's the only one who questions the fact that Hannah and Shoshanna are embarking on a two-day each way road trip to sign Jessa out of rehab without any knowledge of why she was in rehab or if she's really ready to leave. Adam might be blunt and reactionary and downright weird, but in a lot of ways, he's more mature than anyone else on the show.

3. Adam has never played, and isn't sure how to play, Truth or Dare. Did Adam grow up in a cult? It would explain both the lack of basic middle school social knowledge and… everything else. (Full disclosure: There's no actual hint in the episode that Adam was raised in a cult, but… not knowing Truth or Dare? Really?)

4. Hannah is going to really annoy someone with her book deal this season. Everyone is happy for her now, but Hannah has started to view the world even more exclusively as fodder for her book. She laments the road trip because it's not a metaphor for anything, and she was hoping that it would be. Adam makes an offhand comment about it that might be snide if made by anyone else, but since it's Adam, it's hard to say. Even if it's just the audience, someone is going to want Hannah's book deal to fall through if she keeps obsessing about it.

5. Shoshanna is awesomely random. Yes, this was already known, but it was definitely reinforced during the premiere when she buys a rocking chair on a whim at a restaurant (it must be a Cracker Barrel or something like it) she, Hannah and Adam stop at for breakfast.

Overall, the premiere was very Hannah and Jessa-heavy, but not in a bad way. Those interested in details about the show's two big off-again relationships, Shosh and Ray and Marnie and Charlie, will just have to wait on bated breath.