Imagine if David Ortiz were briefly suspended for doping in the minors, let off after it turned out that he had a convincing excuse, and then suspended again for four years after testing positive in November 2007, just after winning the World Series. Imagine that Papi came back a little rusty, but was outslugging… »6/26/15 1:52pm 6/26/15 1:52pm

The Cowboys may have gotten a steal by landing Nebraska pass rusher Randy Gregory in the second round, or they may have gambled away a second-round pick. Gregory, a first-round talent on every board, slipped due to mysterious concerns about his “ability to handle the rigors of the NFL”—inane football jargon for… »5/05/15 3:43pm 5/05/15 3:43pm

The UFC, lately embarrassed by its fighters failing a lot of drug tests, has hired shitbag/former IRS agent Jeff Novitzky, best known as beloved baseball legend Barry Bonds’s persecutor, to be its “Vice President of Athlete Health and Performance.” This seems like a high-falutin’ and more than faintly Orwellian title… »4/06/15 9:22pm 4/06/15 9:22pm

So you want to score some fresh weed, and you are not fortunate enough to live in one of those states that has made the sensible decision to decriminalize it. Congratulations: You’re cool, and you’ve come to the right place (within the wrong place). It’s not that hard to score bud with the right amount of finesse.… »3/10/15 4:13pm 3/10/15 4:13pm

The Nevada State Athletic Commission is a bumbling, soulless government agency, and so a strange agent for the delivery of the message that our gods have forsaken us. They never have been particularly diligent messengers in any event, but for whatever reason—bureaucracy, incompetence, something more nefarious—they…»2/19/15 9:15pm 2/19/15 9:15pm

In its pursuit of PED-using players, MLB worked more closely with federal agents than anyone realized, according to new documents obtained by Newsday. They show that it was MLB that first informed the DEA about Biogenesis, even as the league sought to protect clinic owner Tony Bosch so his evidence could be used to… »11/14/14 10:14am 11/14/14 10:14am

The NFL and the player's association have finally agreed on a new performance-enhancing drug testing policy. Under the new guidelines, HGH testing will be immediately implemented, and a few players who were suspended under the old policy will be free to rejoin their teams and play this Sunday. »9/17/14 11:42am 9/17/14 11:42am

Steelers running backs Le'Veon Bell and LeGarrette Blount (shut up) were arrested in Ross Township, Pennsylvania and are expected to be charged with possession of marijuana. A motorcycle cop reportedly smelled weed from the car they and another unidentified female were in and pulled them over. Bell was driving and is… »8/20/14 9:05pm 8/20/14 9:05pm