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Tuesday, September 10, 2013

And so here's MyPat and I on the 12th floor of the hospital and as usual, MyPat is busy analyzing documents handed to us by the different doctors while I'm here with a somewhat difficult prognosis of yesterdays "Pinoy" events as I'll try and dissect them for you to easily absorb.

We finally made it inland at 9 "fee-em" (p.m.) after a long journey on our bamboo raft and luckily, we weren't wet after all that two and a hap-non stop strenuous paddling, hitting monstrous waves that occasionally reached three quarters (sometimes 2 dimes and a nickel) to a foot high. And that is the main reason why we ended up here in this hospital due to dilapidation for the lack of water.

DAY 1
Although we weren't required to be here until Saturday, we hopped on a TAXI yesterday as our Eeball Kanniball dry bearrr zoomed us on the Pinoy Super Highway, mindlessly racing and cutting off others like no body's business. I'm fearless (or at least I thought I was) and used to this crappy Pinoy maneuvers but believe me and I'll tell you this again, had you been in my 'chai's 9 and a hab 3W choose' from my Athletes Foot, you'll most likely not end up with an underwear bearing brand new multiple skid marks but probably one that's loaded with one stinky bomb-just ready to explode. That will be the outcome experience one will get from these Pinoy drivers and I strongly advise that you read the water marked fine prints (if any) on your insurance papers but if you don't have one, you can write your dying will to me even before you think of taking a ride on the Pinoy Super Highway. As for MyPat and I on this day, we got to our destination in one piece and got a head start familiarizing ourselves on the different floors.

After we thought we've Aced the hospital's maze with no problem, we hopped on a shuttle to the Ayala Mall where I waited almost 3 hrs. for MyPat as she gets a MAKE-OVER. This particular mall is nothing compared to our numerous malls back home-keep wishing. It's large and one can easily get lost among the hundreds and hundreds of others going about their own business and so, while MyPat decided to go on a make-over, I hung around close to the parlor watching, like a scary little chichirika that dares to fly off far and get lost having never to return. I STOOD MY GROUND in my self proclaimed nest waiting for mama bird to come out of the parlor and just get the hell out of dodge but don't blame me! I have no problem getting lost at home as I can always be found but not here. Hell no!

DAY 2 (FASTING)

If the Pinoy traffic wasn't fast (at a screeching halt), we were fasting (avoid eating or drinking anything) the previous night for our first "procedures" with the different doctors. We had to be at the hospital before 8 in the morning so we got up early but madam MyPat was taking her sweet time 'toying' the net but when she asked what time it was (7:45) and I said "past 8" she was like "failaal-sa schiw" only to get a (low but crispy clear) cuss when she found out what the right time was when we reached the hotel lobby.

First to the WELLNESS CENTER on the 5th floor. This seemed to be our favored portion of the hospital. There's a comfortable lounge area, coffee, soup, different pastries and other dispensable drinks, a never ending table of sweetsand a great discovery-outlets to plug in and play the net and the occasional stare from other (home) locals whom we both aren't sure whether they were locals (CNMI or Guam or the other Pacific Islands).

Then there's the blood pressure check, weight and height then off to the reason we had fasted for, the blood extraction, ECG (what ever it stands for), doctors consultation, x-ray and the 2 small cups for (you know what) specimen. Different doctors for different consultations plus the occasional visits to the Insurance Office (on the 10th floor) for coverage consultations.

DAY 3

More consultations and treatments followed on this day which practically took the whole day again. The different appointments on different floors and wings of the hospital can somewhat be confusing at times too but all went well. Had we clocked ourselves in when we first got to the hospital, we could have earned millions in PHP each for being at the hospital more than 8 hrs. but that's okay, we can give back to them for the health services rendered us.

DAY 4

It was Sunday and there were no schedule procedures so we planned to visit the Local Pinoys in 'Karamba' Laguna but that had to be changed. We went to the mall AGAIN!!! Only this time, we had intended to catch the south bound bus to Laguna but once at the mall, the 'planning network' went haywire and so, the attention was focused again on the same parlor as before. From an agreed one hour TOUCH UP to a frigging forever wait on my part. Men'an juice wo nge-alomw santuron. Back to square one and off to Bourbon Street of Makati Avenue we go. And then...I felt I didn't wanna go on with the events that followed before departing the Pinoy isle but I can safely say, all went well with the medical check-up but as far as MyPat goes, we still have another upcoming journey to follow through.