The key to your son’s heart

Moms, are you having trouble connecting with your sons? Are you showing them the same love that you show your daughters and not getting the same results?

“Mothers long to connect with their boys. This is a virtue that God has created in a mother; to connect.”

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs points out that most mothers have an easier time connecting with their daughters, but the story changes when it comes to connecting with their sons.

“When it comes to boys, it sometimes feels like they’re navigating in a foreign country and the whole thing seems different, particularly from age 4-40, that little precious baby isn’t there.”

Mothers tend to feel overwhelmed with shame and guilt for not being able to reach their sons.

“So there is this disappointment in her heart; she’s wanting to connect, but her son doesn’t seem to engage her in the same way that the daughter would engage her. There is this frustration and she feels inadequate, she feels like she’s failing.”

Often it is because mother and son have different needs and expectations for what connection looks like. While love is important, Dr. Emerson says that respect is the key to your son’s heart. By showing your son respect, it will draw you into a deeper connection with him and cover a multitude of sins.

“Boys are very forgiving and they’ll adjust very quickly if you just simply begin to use a few vocabulary words differently, and the boy will just be highly energized and he’s ready to move forward.”

Demonstrating respect often means using less words.

“He’s not wanting to talk about all those past moments, ‘what did you mean when you said this?’ and ‘mom, can we talk about what you meant there?’ He doesn’t even remember that, but there is an effect on the spirit of the boy that’s there, and you can quickly turn the corner on this.”

Moms, it’s never too late to start showing your son the respect that he needs for the connection you deserve.

“Boys are very responsive to respect talk mentioned here and there, is even if a mother has failed.”