SPENCER: Need to apply common sense for Ridley school prankster

By GIL SPENCER

Thursday, January 31, 2013

So you're 12 years old and you think you're pretty clever.

There's a student at your school you don't like. It would be fun to get him in trouble. And a brilliant idea comes to you: Create a Facebook page in his name and say you're going to come to school and kill a bunch of people.

That'll do it. What a gag!

Except the whole thing backfires really badly. County detectives end up at your house and arrest you. YOU, instead of questioning your intended victim. The detectives aren't laughing or smiling at your little joke. They look unhappy. And away you go in handcuffs.

Now you're sitting locked up at the county Juvenile Detention Center in Lima wondering what's the matter with grown-ups that they don't know a good prank when they see one. Don't any of these people watch "Punk'd!" or "TOSH.0"?

And you're also wondering when you'll be able to go home.

Well, it could be a while. There will be no "web redemption" for you.

What there will be is a long process that involves guards, judges, probation officers, psychologists, counselors, new teachers, and probably a new school. And you already know your parents are beyond upset with you.

Just think of all the time and money your little prank will cost them. They'll probably have to hire a lawyer and pay for all sorts of counseling sessions for you and maybe them, too.

But the money's nothing compared to the shame you've brought them. On websites, some people are publicly calling for them to be put in jail for not correctly parenting you. You have disgraced and embarrassed them. Maybe even worse is that your parents may blame themselves for YOUR nitwit behavior.

At least your name isn't in the newspaper. It's being kept out because of your age. But all your friends and your family's friends know who you are and the nasty, stupid thing you did.

So here's what's going to happen to you:

You will be held at Lima until you can be thoroughly evaluated to see if you "pose a risk" to the community. Grown-ups don't take threats of gun violence lightly, whether they come from a weaponless 12-year-old or a well-armed 40-year-old.

You and your parents will be asked a lot of questions about your past behavior. Do you like setting fires? Do you take pleasure in hurting animals? Do you act out in school? Do you have anger-management issues at home? Are you a loner? Did you have access to a gun?

After a while, a judge will decide whether you can go home or if you need to be placed in what they call "an alternative setting."

The likelihood is that as a first-time offender (if you're a first-time offender) you'll get probation. But you'll still have to do all the counseling and anger-management stuff.

All of the above is what Dr. Jerry Lazaroff tells me you can expect.

For 18 years, he's evaluated children like you for the county's Juvenile Court -- children who found themselves in trouble for doing dumb and mean things. He's still a court psychologist, but he only works with adults now.

He remembers that after the school shootings in Columbine, Colo., the judge in charge of our county court went off the deep end. Children were being locked up for writing essays that even hinted at violence. Honor-roll students and Boy Scouts were being detained for days, sometimes weeks, to be evaluated. It was good for Lazaroff's business, but not so much for the taxpayers or the children that these "zero-tolerance" policies victimized.

But Lazaroff also tells me school officials and law enforcement are doing a better job now of applying a little common sense to these cases, even after the recent tragedy in Newtown, Conn.

Today, he says, "Our juvenile court does a very good job at evaluating these kind of situations." They also do a pretty good job at "rehabilitating the youngster so that incidents like this don't recur."

So you've got that going for you.

Furthermore, he says that less than 20 percent of the children he used to see actually "represented a true threat" to the community. So it seems likely, even though we don't have all the facts in your case, that you're not a budding sociopath, but just a child who made a stupid mistake.

It will be the job of a judge and a shrink or two to decide where you fall in the scheme of things.

If this was nothing more than a case of adolescent bad judgment, all you have to do is be honest and then do what the people who care about you most tell you to do.

When it comes to mistakes, we all make them. That's worth remembering. From your own parents to the judge who will decide your case to the cops who arrested you. They have all made mistakes and they have all needed second chances in their lives.

You're far too young to be written off and you won't be. Not by anyone who matters.

As Dr. Lazaroff told me, "I understand the public outcry after hearing this kind of a story. But you also have to look at what was going on (in this child's life) before you jump to the conclusion that this kid needs to be sent away for years."

That's surely right.

So just sit tight and be patient. Help is on the way.

Gil Spencer's column appears Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Check out his spencerblog at delcotimes.com every day.