Monday, November 4

On Friday afternoon, November 15, at 3:00 pm in the Student
Commons at Virginia Commonwealth University, I will be giving a presentation or
some sort called New Writing: Maintaining Your Shadow in Light of Total
Awareness. What will this presentation involve? All of the following:

Keeping it shady even though authoritative overlords want
you to be transparent as fuck so as to get a better digital read of how they
can sell you shit/make you afraid of shit.

Preventing your blood from being turned into money by lizard
humanoids.

Using curry in combination with lacto-fermented foods to
loosen up stagnant energy in your gut – kinda like that bullshit lemonade
master cleanse thing, but actually encouraging positive probiotic growth
instead of just gut-bombing yourself like healthy bulimia.

How to successfully navigate time travel to within five
decades past, and four weeks forward. Beyond that either way, you’re on your
own.

The importance of writing strict form sonnets in the 21st
Century, but not iambic pentameter because BORING.

How our minds being completely fragmented by wireless
digital energies what which we interact with openly is definitely a change occurring,
but rather than get all Luddite scared, perhaps we should just learn to do
better more soulful mosaics with our fragments.

The neo-pagan, post-industrial, subliminal earth
consciousness of Balkan state football hooligan groups, specifically as it
relates to setting fires in occupied spaces at away games.

Bedazzling balaclavas, while still maintaining an Etsy- and
Pinterest-free zone.

Wearing digital sock puppets for increased comfort.

How to psychologically justify to yourself that America is
indeed still an exceptional meritocracy, and because of that, if you are smart
enough and work hard enough, you will not be fucked.

Using paint-sticks efficiently on rusty objects.

How to treat the surface web and more covert deep web like a
raised bed garden, using digital composting to bear life sustaining fruit not
yet harvested by libertarians (aka The Alternate White Guys).

Back yard screen-printing.

Converting old government auction school buses to
bio-diesel, and how to effectively bury recycled shipping containers for
concealed lifestyles. (NOTE: This particular part will be specific to southern West
Virginia.)

Appearing in real life to actually exist, to other animals.

Identifying future trends by communicating with forest
spirits, who have basically been in hiding since 1672 on the North American
continent, east of the Mississippi.

How to securely change your password with Google products
without having to ever use auto-save again.

The art of burning bridges, enjoying the fire, fighting up
stream, baptizing yourself in struggle, building new bridges, and then burning
those too (and how to save fun metallic memento pieces from every bridge to
weld your own Power Whirligig Nkisi).

Composing post-narrative resumes for a career-less world.

Increasing your personal brand’s worldwide presence through
guerrilla means that are not necessarily cool or necessary, then feeling bad
about it but being stuck with what you’ve done, and learning how to come to
grips with what a piece of shit you were. And selling related t-shirts.

Squatting on, developing, and sharing intellectual property
wasting its true potential because people are assholes who think they own every
fucking thing they ever thought of in their lives.

Raising chickens, including proper hen-to-rooster ratios as
it relates to egg productivity and quality of life, as well as further
explications of gamecock vs. peacock cultural differences, and how the guinea
hen sort of bridges those differences, which is why guinea hens are so
goddamned annoying.

Where to find the least toxic blunt wrappers in the hood.

Living discreetly in interstate median strips, and how to
get EBT benefits with no known address.

Counting to 666 by 7s, using only whole numbers.

Illegal emigration, and which South American rural area
might be best for you.

How “WHOO!”ing like “Nature Boy” Ric Flair can benefit you
in your everyday life, and figuring your way out of four common locks on our
psychic energies.

Making your own stencil that says GENTRIFIED to spray all
over everything every where.

How impact font is the comic sans of pretend-seriousness.

Creating effective memes and hashtags through the use of
memes and hashtags.

How to write better books that will get published and sell a
bazillion copies to everybody on earth and then you’ll be rich as fuck and
never have to hear another person tell you how to write better because it’ll
totally finally be done, like magic, FTW.

Culturing buttermilk at home, and using this as a basis to
eat from-scratch buttermilk cornbread at least three mornings a week, thus
increasing your ability to use a cast iron skillet which justifies the
continued existence of cast iron skillets, which ultimately will become more
important than smart phones, again. Also building cast iron skillet apps (aka
recipes).

Monster catfish of the James River, and they symbolic
relevance to our human struggle for equality worldwide, but specifically 85
miles in both directions off the river throughout Virginia.

Turning personal demons of self-destruction into dragon
slayers what which you unleash upon the unlounging aspects of this crooked
world.

How to successfully pretend you care about unimportant
bullshit both online and in the post-modern workplace, so as to not call
attention to what you’re really working on in life.

Making yourself more upworthy, by speaking pure truth at
1:32 mark, but literally blowing people’s minds into a thousand shards of
newfound awareness at 3:48.

Plus assorted other recipes, anecdotes, and creation myths
from my family’s 4.45 acre Bird Tribe Compound, currently co-spirited by the
trickster nature of ravens and the healing nature of owls.

None of the above. Always none of the above. Perhaps. Who
knows?

After the “talk” there will be a short break I guess, where
we talk at each other on a more personal level, then we’ll have a Rojonekku
W.F.A. Hand-to-Hand Haiku Tournament for all who choose to take part. If you
aim to compete, bring yourself 20-some haiku. If you aim to watch, aim away. I
hope you hit the target.

starting points

What It Do

Low art formed in low places by a real dude. Bread words on the bedazzling bedeviled internet machines. For flesh and blood contact, or exchanges of treasure or tribute): RAVEN MACK PO BOX 585 CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA 22902. For 1s and 0s robot contact (or exchanges of virus and vinegraic piss): ravenmack at gmail dot com. Paypal support can be thrown at that email address too if you got it like that.

Might I suggest the best way to enjoy my madness is to scroll to the bottom and get lost in the tag labyrinth.