While it had been suggested that advertisers planned to "play it safe" during this year's Super Bowl(R), one company was all about taking a risk. Degree(R) For Men introduced "The Mama's Boy" in their first-ever Super Bowl(R) commercial. The ad supports the introduction of Degree For Men, a new line of body-responsive anti-perspirants and deodorants that helps men maintain their confidence when they take a risk. (PRNewsFoto) less

While it had been suggested that advertisers planned to "play it safe" during this year's Super Bowl(R), one company was all about taking a risk. Degree(R) For Men introduced "The Mama's Boy" in their ... more

Elite runners start the first wave of Bay to Breakers 2018San Francisco Chronicle

Coyote trots around Golden Gate parkTed Andersen, SFGATE

But at least one danger was averted: The halftime show, featuring Paul McCartney, was produced by Don Mischer, the same guy who produced the Democratic National Convention and famously screamed this into an open microphone on CNN: "Go, balloons. Balloons. What's happening balloons? There's not enough coming down. All balloons! Why the hell is nothing falling?"

Sadly, that wasn't repeated again on Sunday. Instead, what came across our screens was mostly safe, mostly boring and only occasionally good enough to be remembered today (including the game).

Super Bowl commercials tend to either go for laughs or spread the schmaltz. Advertisers almost completely avoided the latter, and couldn't pull off the former nearly enough. And you can't really blame Janet for that. Some thoughts:

-- When expectations are low, pilots jumping out of airplanes while chasing beer can be funny. But only because you really want to laugh after enduring, what, 19 hours of pregame hype?

-- So why spend $2.4 million in the span of 30 seconds to sell breathable contact lenses?

-- There was an Olympus ad featuring some funky dancing stuff that was interesting and even cool, but didn't somebody else use that technology last Super Bowl? Levi's, maybe?

-- Loved the FedEx spot spoofing Super Bowl ads with Burt Reynolds and the bear. Clever. You know, sometimes clever is better than stupid. Not always, but mostly.

-- You think Cedric the Entertainer tossing away two squabbling, hot babes in favor of a barbecue and a dog was sexist? What, sexism in the Super Bowl?

-- Diet Coke has unearthed its women-gawking-at-men idea (reverse sexism, in the Super Bowl?) but made it credible again with "Queer Eye" star Carson Kressley in the mix (reverse, then half-back-option-pass sexism in the Super Bowl?).

-- Did Godaddy.com, with its busty beauty almost having a "wardrobe malfunction" spoof our nation's reactionary backlash to Janet Jackson, MTV and boundary-pushing crassness, or was it just a model in a stupid ad?

-- If you watched the McDonald's commercial and went to lincolnfry.com well, hell, there's just no hope for you. If you went to Godaddy.com, then sex does sell, to the tune of $2.4 million for 30 seconds.

-- Laughed out loud at the Ameriquest "You're getting robbed" commercial. Mace, electroshock -- always funny. The "don't judge" concept worked smartly again with a white cat, tomato sauce and a carving knife.

-- Aren't we, as a civilization, just a tad too sophisticated for talking babies? Quiznos, take note. Baby Bob -- not even the graphics are good. Work on your food, next time. Same thing goes for the Subway ads. Boring.

-- Every Super Bowl there's one or two commercials that dumbfound you. Some are just a complete waste of money. Others make you think, "Was a crack pipe used in the making of this ad?" This year the award goes to MBNA for its credit card commercials. English rugby and Gladys Knight. W-o-w. Even if you get the jeering comparison to unpadded, unglorious rugby vs. NFL football, you still have to factor in Gladys Knight. Rock and Roll Hall of Fame? Yeah, OK. And?

-- The Lay's potato chip ad with the scary old neighbor throwing an errant baseball back over the fence when given some chips played well, then built to even bigger laughs with the tossing over of forgotten items like a car and then MC Hammer (who got tossed back to the old man). Excellent.

-- Careerbuilder.com and the monkeys. It went beyond the obvious (not enough to be great, but it got a few smiles).

-- Pepsi and iTunes together. Whatever.

-- The Degree ad with the "inaction figures" was mildly amusing, but then the pitch "some men never take risks" -- well, it's a long way back to deodorant concerns from there. If switching underarm products is taking a risk, some people have been in the house too long. Speaking of that, was Sunday the longest day ever?

-- Probably shouldn't have laughed, but did: The cockatiel and the Bud Light ad. Animals with accents -- maybe not always politically correct, but almost always funny. Sad but true.

-- Maybe if you're from Chicago you appreciated the commercial from some company called Silestone about its "Diana Pearl" countertop product, but really, why would anyone else sit up and think about redoing their kitchen by watching faded athletes from the Windy City?

-- The Brad Pitt ad for Heineken was cinematic and almost interesting, but mostly it will make the Pitt-Anistonologists go insane deciphering the intent of "Yeah, we're still on."

-- The NFL Network has had consistently creative ads since launching, and Sunday's featuring Joe Montana and others singing "Tomorrow" to Ben Roethlisberger, the Steelers rookie who almost got his team to the Super Bowl, was another fine score.

-- One more car commercial and out come the eyeballs.

-- The dad lying to his daughter so as not to give her Emerald nuts -- yes. More, please. Even the Cadillac ad with the dad racing down his eloping daughter just to get the car back wasn't all bad.

Unfortunately, like most of Sunday's commercials, neither was it all that memorable. Maybe the advertising community had its creativity dampened by the wet blanket of the morality police.

If so, maybe that's what we'll take from Super Bowl Sunday. We're all cleaner, if not entertained.