Strangest celeb baby announcements

Before social media empowered celebs to reach directly out to their fans with big news, pregnancy announcements were a mainstay of magazine covers. Demi Moore, Brooke Shields, and Cindy Crawford all did some version of the naked, pregnant, and covering-my-boobs-with-my-arm thing. Brad and Angelina did exclusive cover shoots for both Shiloh and their twins, Vivienne and Knox. So did Jennifer Lopez, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and more. This was just how things were done, and the resulting images were all rather run-of-the-mill, tasteful, sweet portraits. But the game has changed. If you aren't "breaking the internet," nobody's paying attention, so some stars have resorted to scandalous and, frankly, odd ways to announce the expansion of their families. Here are some of the strangest celebrity baby announcements.

Beyoncé

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Does Beyoncé ever do anything small? We imagine she doesn't even go out for froyo without a wind machine and 7-inch heels, so it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone that she treated the announcements of both of her pregnancies with a fanfare usually reserved for the Pope. To tell the world that Blue Ivy would soon be upon them to rule with a tiny, perfect fist, Beyoncé chose to announce her pregnancy at the 2011 MTV Video Music Awards. And no, she didn't just tell Su-chin Pak on the red carpet. Are you, nuts? No, no, no, she gave a leave-it-all-on-the-stage performance of "Love on Top," then literally dropped the mic, unbuttoned her bedazzled blazer, and let the lowly normal folk of the world gaze upon her baby bump. No way to top that, right? Psh, you should know better than to doubt Bey.

Knowing she needed to go above and beyond her previous reveal, Beyoncé decided there would have to be twice the number of babies to announce. Okay, we admit that part was up to Mother Nature, but if anyone has her direct line, it's Queen Bey. Anyway, this time around, the songstress revealed her pregnancy on Instagram with the help of photographer Awol Erizku, who not only has a master of fine arts from Yale University, but has shown his work at the Museum of Modern Art, reported People. According to Vanity Fair, the imagery Beyoncé and Erizku chose, which arguably has an odd if not funeral-y vibe to it in some shots, gave nods to everything ranging from 15th century portraits of the Virgin Mary to a modern cover of Wonderland featuring Kim Kardashian. How that all adds up the most internet-shattering pregnancy announcement of all time? We have no clue, but that's why she is Beyoncé and we're just over here writing about her.

Jenelle Evans

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Each season of Teen Mom has "that one." Some may say that on the original season "that one" could be either Farrah Abraham or Amber Portwood, but we all know the truth. Only one of those ladies makes the MTV crew use a porta-potty in her driveway, so it's Abraham, no question. On Teen Mom 2, the same argument could be made for Jenelle Evans, so when it came time for her to announce her third pregnancy, this time with boyfriend David Eason, shenanigans ensued.

First, Evans and Eason let themselves get recorded talking about a doctor visit that was obviously baby-related, yet they lied about it to producers on camera. Then, they got into a car accident in which the police report documented a passenger who was 10 weeks pregnant. When the report was leaked to the press, their surprise was blown. Evans then did the reasonable thing and immediately notified her family and friends, right? Wrong. Instead, she reportedly lied to everyone, including her own mom, who had already seen the police report and remarked on her daughter's obviously growing belly. They supposedly did all of this because Evans wanted the announcement to be "classy," so she waited until they did the above J. Crew-esque photo shoot to tell everyone.

Fergie and Josh Duhamel

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When Black Eyed Peas singer Fergie learned that she would soon be sporting a new lovely lady lump, she was so surprised she told her husband, actor Josh Duhamel, "This sh*t just got real," according to Page Six (via the Mirror). But he was ready, reportedly saying, "I'm not 24, I've got some life experience that I think I can impart…My mother was the disciplinarian and my father was more of a free spirit. Hopefully I'm somewhere in between."

What we weren't ready for was this bizarre photo that Fergie and Duhamel simultaneously tweeted. It's some sort of Photoshopped mash-up of baby photos of the two of them. It kind of makes it look like they're brother and sister, which is weird, for obvious reasons. Also, are they expecting a kitten? It was cute, albeit maybe a little ill-conceived, but we're also talking about a couple who named their son Axl Jack, which sounds like one of those bulk bags of knock-off cereal on the bottom shelf, so we're not exactly dealing with traditionalists here.

Jamie Lynn Spears

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In December of 2007, in the midst of her older sister, pop star Britney Spears, having public meltdowns, shaving her head, and battling for custody of her own children, Jamie Lynn Spears announced to the world that she was starting a family. The thing is, she was just 16-years-old at the time. Jamie Lynn was also a public figure. As the star of Nickelodeon's Zoey 101 (2005-08) her teen pregnancy was bound to be scandalous, so like any media-savvy family, Jamie Lynn and her mom decided to get out in front of the story and gave exclusive rights to OK! Magazine with a cover to boot. In the article, Jamie Lynn says the pregnancy wasn't planned—Duh—and that she wanted to get the word out to her fans that they should definitely wait and not get pregnant at 16.

While that is certainly a good message to get out to her young and impressionable audience, it's odd she chose OK! Magazine as the vehicle to inspire positive change. After all, this is the same publication that ran the following headlines about her older sis: "At Home With Britney 'I'm So Bored, I Hate My Life'" and "Last Day With Mommy," which was about Britney temporarily having her sons taken away from her. We're not saying Jamie Lynn should have tried to hide her pregnancy, but maybe she could have shopped around for another mag that wouldn't be so quick to knife her sister in the back.

Bristol Palin

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Bristol Palin shocked the world when she announced she was pregnant at 17-years-old, right in the middle mother Sarah Palin's candidacy as John McCain's running mate in the 2008 U.S. Presidential Election. Palin then became an outspoken abstinence advocate, doing TV appearances to discuss the topic, and even taking a position as a brand ambassador for the Candie's Foundation, which was the charitable arm of the teen fashion line. According to Forbes, the mission of the foundation was "to educate America's youth about the devastating consequences of teen pregnancy through celebrity PSA campaigns and initiatives." Sounds great, right? She took a tough situation and turned it into a teachable moment for other young women who may find themselves in her position. But hang on a second.

Bristol promoted abstinence, meaning waiting for marriage before having sex. So with that in mind, fast forward to 2015 when Bristol, who was not married at the time, announced her second pregnancy. Whoops. The hypocrisy was not lost on the young spokeswoman, who penned a dismal blog entry announcing the news that included the phrasing, "Honestly, I've been trying my hardest to keep my chin up on this one," and "I know this has been, and will be, a huge disappointment to my family, to my close friends, and to many of you." Wow. A little advice for Bristol: maybe try to contact Google and get that one scrubbed from the internet before baby no. 2 learns how to use an iPad.

Kristen Bell

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Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard are known for comedy, so it makes sense that they would take the funny route when announcing their kids to the world. For their first child, Lincoln, Kristen took to Twitter and posted the following: "My new roomate poops her pants and doesn't pay rent…basically @daxshepard1 pre-sobriety welcome baby Lincoln xo." Nothing says adorable like a poop joke right out of the gate while simultaneously reminding the world that your baby daddy used to be an addict, right?

Bell obviously had to up her game when it was time to announce the baby sequel, Delta, so what did Belle go with? A photo of Shepard trying to buy cocaine from a stork and the stork hands him a baby instead? Nah, that's too on the nose and/or Fergie and Duhamel's Photoshop guy was probably booked. She ended up just posting a creepy picture of an adult gorilla holding a tiny baby gorilla's hand with the caption, "The estrogen has now hit critical mass! Good luck, @daxshepard1. And welcome to the world DELTA BELL SHEPARD " So wait, does estrogen turn ladies into gorillas or something? We're just going to leave that question unanswered and move on.

Benicio Del Toro and Kimberly Stewart

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Nobody even knew that actor Benicio Del Toro and socialite Kimberly Stewart were an item until they announced in 2011 that Stewart was expecting. That's probably because they weren't and, at the time of this writing, are still not in a romantic relationship. In fact, the press release/baby announcement they issued specifically stated, "Although they are not a couple, they are looking forward to the arrival of the baby." It almost seems as if they spelled this out in case there was a chance that one or both of them would be out on a date and this news would happen to scroll across the bottom of the news ticker and blow it for them.

Look, we realize it's not the 1950s, when a child out of wedlock was perceived as the ultimate smear on one's reputation, and by most accounts, Del Toro and Stewart have enjoyed a great co-parenting relationship. However, we can't help but wish they'd shelled out the cash for one of those fancy pregnancy shoots where, like, the expectant mom lays naked in a pond and they paint her belly like a turtle, and the dad stands ashore with a fishing pole or something.

Jude Law

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Whereas Benicio Del Toro and Kimberly Stewart's baby announcement was congenial, although slightly impersonal, Jude Law's acknowledgment of his impending fourth fatherhood sounded so cold it could have been written by a team of lawyers at the North Pole. Law's statement read, in part, "Mr. Law is no longer in a relationship with the individual concerned but he intends to be a fully supportive part of the child's life." That would sound less harsh if the baby mama had chosen to remain anonymous, but she didn't. According to the Daily Mail, Samantha Burke, the actress who had "shared an evening of lust" with Law, not only went public about her pregnancy but also shopped baby Sophia's first photos around to the tabloids. We think Law referring to his former lover as "the individual concerned" was most likely some shade tossed out by the notoriously press-shy actor. Seriously, if there is a worse way to tell the world that you're having a kid than in a legal document released to the press, we don't know what it is.

Bridget Moynahan and Tom Brady

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Long before "Deflategate," Tom Brady was plagued with a much more common scandal among pro athletes: baby mama-gate. Just like Jude Law, the New England Patriots quarterback was outed to the world as a soon-to-be dad when his ex-girlfriend, actress Bridget Moynahan, issued a press release through her publicist that stated she "is over three months pregnant. Former boyfriend Tom Brady is the father." Not only had Brady broken up with his pregnant girlfriend, but by the time this press release came out, he'd already moved on with supermodel Gisele Bündchen. Welcome to Scumbagville—population: Tom Brady.

With that kind of ammunition, Moynahan could have gleefully dragged her ex through the mud in the press, but she didn't. She took the high road, years later telling More (via Us Weekly), "I never made a comment about Gisele or Tom publicly," she said. "I have a relationship with these people on a daily basis. I'm raising a child, and it's public. My son has two loving parents and an extended family, whether it's cousins or stepmothers or boyfriends. My son is surrounded by love." It seems Moynahan put Brady on blast just that one time with the pregnancy announcement, then quietly proceeded to kick butt at being a mom. Four Super Bowl rings have nothing on that.