Monday, February 11, 2008

whoa my god

So, I feel like an asshole...

I left Kid last night with some not-so-great feelings toward him, and then I agreed to meet up with him today anyhow, not remembering anything about him except that feeling that I was going to throw up in the end, but not due to anything that I had put in my body. Maybe it was me rejecting the thought of casual sex. I wasn't going to go, but then I was talking to my little brother and I was like, "I don't think I'm going to meet up with this guy. I think he's only 22." And Little Brother said, "I'm going out with a 22-year-old today! What's wrong with that?"

But whoa my god, Kid is really sweet! And he looked older today. He must be at least 23. Or 24. That's not so bad... But I had a really good time with him! We have a lot of common interests, and he's really down to earth. And we both think our little brothers are the coolest people in the world. The only big "red flag" for me is that he seems like someone I could push around. Like he's a vegetarian and he told me a story about a guy who he didn't like but lived with him and pretended to be his friend anyway. He also has the same name as my first boyfriend, which is funny because last week I was saying I wanted my next relationship to be more like my first relationship. Which would mean I would end up with kind of a pushover guy who made me feel like a crackwhore--not because he was demeaning in any way, but just because next to his pure white ass, I felt like one...and then I started to act like one...I'm not sure how related these two developments were though.