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That is the PG13 title for this post. Truthfully, it should be called I hate Winter, because I do. You can call me a grinch and I will just shrug my shoulders in a grinchly manner! Winter is absolutely, hands down the WORST season of the year. I haven’t conducted an official poll yet, but I’m sure I’m not in the minority.

One of the things that grinds my gears about Winter is the weather. It’s just cold. Not cool, not chilly, but just COLD. The kind of cold that isn’t comfortable, the kind that requires layers to be worn. Don’t forget the hats, gloves and SCARVES lest you want to expose yourself to some sort of flu/cold combo. Personally, I’m not a fan of hats, but I’m forced to wear one everytime I go outside these days, because its so friggin cold! Also, I’m just a naturally cold person. Well, not my soul, but just my body. Let’s just say, I sleep with comforters during the summer and I don’t have AC. So when the temperature starts shlepping towards below 50 degrees, I begin the layer dance. And below 45, I might start the hat/scarf/gloves combo. The thing is my hands and ears are the most sensitive to the cold weather. When its cold out, my nails and the tops of my ears begin to hurt. Yes, put on gloves, put on earmuffs. I DO. But after 17 years of city living and 8 years of Massachusetts living, my nails and ears still hurt! Another thing is that everything is dead. Ok, maybe not everything, but nature is pretty much gone at this point. Combined with the temperature drop and the shortened days, you won’t find beautiful lush trees, green grass, or even an occasional flower upon which to gaze longingly. Instead you get snow. And forgive me for not thinking snow is pretty, but I’m from New York City where white snow lasts all of 2 seconds before it turns its permanent color of grayish-brownish. Cold weather, bare nature and dirty snow? Its the perfect recipe for me to despise winter.

While I do enjoy the occasional song about Winter, you won’t hear me blasting my stereo when “Winter Wonderland” or “Baby Its Cold Outside” comes on. Ok, I don’t have a stereo, but if I did, I definitely would change the radio station. Why would anyone want to walk in snow, because let’s keep it real, that’s what a Winter Wonderland really is…just some snow Wouldn’t you like to walk on a sandy beach? Or even a dry piece of sidewalk? And while I don’t think the weather is a valid reason to get closer to your lover, I’ve heard an escape to any of the Sandals in the Carribbean will do wonders to revive the spice in a relationship.

So, readers, I personally won’t be dreaming of a “White Christmas.” As a matter of fact, I’ll just enjoy day of winter as it passes because one day more of winter, is one more day closer to summer!