With the entire world in deep denial over such trivial issues as the Rising Tide of Islamofascism, Plummeting Western Birth Rates, Illegal Immigration, Crime, and even The Holocaust, it is appropriate to look at the silly things the more credulous among us do believe in but shouldn’t. 1. Man-Made Global (sic) Warming. “We have to […]

Went for a management job at a fish stick factory (seriously) but the interview must have gone poorly, because the uptight HR Chick turned The Beast down despite his scintillant personality. It went sort of like this: Perhaps chewing gum in the interview was a bad idea too….

Several months ago The Beast was fortunate to lurch across the funniest, wittiest blog he has ever seen in his fifteen years surfing the Internet: The Hatemonger’s Quarterly. Here is just a brief taste: “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Official Complaint Form: Dear Crack Young Staff of “The Hatemonger’s Qurarterly,” I am a regular reader of your […]

Emboldened by their success at solving all our problems in the Middle East, and anxious not to lose momentum, The Iraq Study Group announced that they secretly decided to devote an extra day to ten additional problems. They are listed below: 10. Smoking. ISG: “Quit.” 9. Spouse Abuse. ISG: “Get Out Now.” 8. Teenage Homelessness. […]

Welcome to the site! Several days ago in an uncharacteristic burst of productivity, The Beast crafted a mildy amusing satire (Below) poking fun at Conspiracy freaks, the MSM Fauxtographers, and French Genius Jerry Lewis. One need only look at the header, Bush Lied, International Polar Moon Camp Already There!, to realize that this is not […]