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30 Things I learned Before My 30th Candle

You can
never know what life has in store for you. It is full of secrets that only get
revealed in your life when the time is right.

2.Every choice you make has a consequence.

Young or
old, every choice you make has a consequence and, some consequences are
permanent. So make wise choices.

3.Start saving.

Most of us
black children are not taught to save from a young age, however we can’t blame
our parents because they were probably living just to make ends meet. But, I can’t
stress how important this is. Start saving, and start saving from a young age.
You will be proud of yourself when you realise how much you have saved decades
later.

4.Forgive.

As I grew, I
have learned that people will offend me, and I will offend people. The key is
to learn to forgive others because I don’t know how many had to forgive me.

5.Learn when to cut ties.

Know when it
is time to move on from a friendship. The truth is, other people are in our
lives just for a season and not for a lifetime. Don’t wait for a friendship to
get sour and toxic. Know when it’s time to cut ties respectfully.

6.Don’t be afraid to fail.

Every great
leader didn’t try once and succeed. You will fail. The trick is to not allow
fear of failure to scare you. Failure is part of every success story.

7.Have a teachable spirit.

This is one
of the important foundations for any leader. Have a teachable spirit because
you never arrive. You can never know everything.

8.Know when it’s time to move.

This relates
to the workplace. Never hold on until you become a bad stench in the
organisation. You always know when it’s time for you to move to another
department or another organisation.

9.Avoid bad debt.

If you want
it so badly, why can’t you have the patience to save and budget for it? I
always knew that if I don’t need it, then I can live without having it.

10. Know
yourself.

“Self-knowledge
is the rarest train in human beings.” You don’t need performance to prove yourself.
You don’t need to be popular to feel important. You don’t need possessions to
identify with yourself. If you still think you need those 3, then its time you
evaluate yourself because you don’t know yourself.

11.You have time but don’t waste it.

You don’t
have to live in anxiety thinking that time is running out. However, don’t waste
time because you don’t want to wake up and realise you wasted so many years
doing nothing. Have a sense of urgency and get rest.

12. Define
your vision.

I love the millennials,
but one of the things I have noticed about this generation is, they start
things without calculating the costs and therefore fail to finish. Defining
your vision helps you not to do something just because you can. I don’t get
involved in things that won’t get me to next level of where I am going. You
don’t want to be an octopus on roller skates, going everywhere but not the
finish line.

13. Consistency
and hard work gets you to the success road.

Some people
are successful because they are consistent. Yet others are not successful
because of inconsistency. You need to put in the work.

14. Don’t
be hard on yourself.

We are our
worst critics, but know that for as long as you are still alive, you have a
chance to rewrite chapters in your life.

15. Value
family.

When you are
still a teenager, you think that friends are everything and your family members
are your enemy. When you are in your mid-20s, you realise family is important
and seasonal friends start to fade away from your life. Value your family, they
will be there for you when you need them the most.

16. Rejection
from people has nothing to do with you.

You can be
the best at what you do, the best friend or partner and still be rejected.
Always know that it is part of the process and has nothing to do with you.

17. Manage
your expectations.

Always give
without expectations from people. What you can easily do for someone doesn’t
necessarily mean they would jump at the chance to return the favour.

18. Take
care of yourself.

You only
have one body. Take really good care of it!

19. Take
time to pause and reflect.

Make time to
celebrate yourself for doing well. We chase achievements so much that we forget
to stop and see our tortoise steps towards the goals we have achieved. You
deserve to celebrated, so take time to celebrate yourself.

20. Create
memories.

It’s a good
idea to start working on your bucket list before family life and children take
over. You might have the time to do it later when the kids are older but your
energy won’t be at its maximum as now. So, seize the moment.

21. Don’t
live a compromised life.

You show
people how to treat you and living a compromised life will show people that you
don’t value yourself. You only have one life. You can’t be putting dreams on
hold because of other people, live your best life because you only get once
chance at it!

22. You
are a brand.

You don’t
need to be celebrity to be a brand. Know your personal brand. Work on your
personal brand and be who you believe you are placed in this world to be.

23. Two
most important choices you will ever make.

Who you believe in- that will carry you
through life. I am a born again child of God, I believe in God and Jesus the
Messiah. Who do you believe in? Who you
marry- that person can break or make your destiny. They can destroy or lift
you up and, they can put you in debt and poverty, or financial freedom wealth.

24.Respect
other people’s values and opinions.

Just because
you don’t agree on a matter doesn’t mean you have to stop being friends. You
don’t have to force people to see it your way. Respect their values and
opinions and move on.

25. Not
everyone is an early bloomer.

Some turn 28
and they already have a qualification, a house, a car and are in managerial
positions in the workplace. Some turn 35 and only do they become home owners
and get a real job. Don’t be pressured by what your peers are achieving, be on
your lane and remember we are all not early bloomers.

26.Pray always.

Prayer
works. You will need to be patient though, for God will build your character
before giving you something.

27.Think
before you tweet.

Everything
you do online lives on google forever. Don’t be over taken by emotions and not
think before you tweet. Same applies for Facebook.

28.Always
show up!

Even if it
is to sit there quietly with a loved one and listen, make time to show up when they
have lost a loved one or are in hospital. If you can’t show up, make that call!

29.Don’t
resist change.

Change is inevitable. Challenge yourself to new things and don’t
resist change. When it happens, it means you are ready to handle whatever is
coming your way, that’s why it is very important to always be prepared.

Today forgive myself- i got the understanding that not everyone is an early bloomer or over achiever. At 41 I thought I would have achieved my set goals, however im assured that all the missed/skipped goals will still come.

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