The quiet of the day

12/26/16

I've been craving solitude lately and these holidays just fitted in so well. With my boyfriend gone to celebrate over at his parents' for a few days, I spend my moments idly, mostly doing nothing withot remorse. I'm singing a lot and wandering through my fields and forests for hours on end. Being solo suits me fine and I find comfort in not having to interact with anyone. It's like coming back to my own place in my head and in my heart, and remembering or perhaps re-learning what I like and want and need and am. There are things we all do because they're expected of us but they may not correspond to who we really are. I may have put on some pretty and elegant attire for Christmas Eve but weary legs in muddied shoes and shoulders tired from carrying a backpack are always going to be "me" more than anything. I like to sing and drink good coffee and watch teen dramas. I think about other people way too much and I get hopelessly lost daydreaming my life away. I need more structure but less restraint and self-imposed rules. I want a lot of time and space to feel alive. This is who I learn I am now, at this quiet time that I wish would not come to an end.

Maybe it's just the reflective nature of the end of the year but it's good to realize these thoughts. Have you had any end of the year revelations that you'd like to share?

I'm wearing: a dress I made from a self drafted pattern and from vintage corduroy. Also: Nightcrawler Goods pin (thank you for the extras, Ben!), old cardigan, hat knitted by Granny, thrifted coat and boots and backpack, necklace c/o Good Looking Objects, old scarf.

3 comments

That sounds lovely. And knowing that is how you are spending your time at the same time as viewing the photos paints a lovely feeling. " I want a lot of time and space to feel alive." -- i am the same way, at least how I interpret what you said : ) I need a lot of free time to just be, daydream, "waste" time, etc... Stunning photos, gosh! So juicy. And so so delighted to see the necklace is within these photos!!

I felt so identified with your writing! I love spending time alone as well — I'm an introvert and too much social interaction can leave me feeling super exhausted. Thankfully, I am a part of a very small family so Christmas and New Year are always very peaceful and quiet ^^.

Thank you for this post so elegantly and truthfully written. I read it a couple of days ago and it has stayed with me, so much so, that I had to come back for a reread.

My husband is moving to a new city in a week and I am staying in our current city (Seattle) to fulfill my yearly teaching contract. Although I am a saddened by the thought of being separated for 6 months, I am also looking forward to the same solitude you wrote of in this post. Time to gather one's thoughts and bask in silence is not something everyone knows how to appreciate.