Heavy, emotional day ends in growth

A few years ago, Ruidoso Middle School began hosting a new type of event for its students called Challenge Day. The program aims to teach student empathy, help lessen feelings of isolation and develop stronger bonds with their peers that will ultimately reduce or eliminate bullying and violence.

This year, The Nest sent one of its senior resident advocates, Britta Magnusson, to participate. After a long and emotional day, and after a few days to recover, she reflected on some aspects and experiences of the day with the students.

"It sort of feels like a dream," Magnusson said, noting that many moments were emotionally exhausting and overwhelming.

Challenge Day participants, students and facilitators alike, began their days with silly exercises meant to bring everybody to the same level — an important component of developing empathy. "We were instructed on what to do and how to encourage the kids to participate in both the fun part and the hard part," Magnusson said. "We started by dancing, shouting and jumping around. It was really fun to watch the kids react to adults being so goofy with them."

Participants were separated into groups and sat down together. "Most of the kids started off sticking with their friends at first," Magnusson said. Then the groups were mixed. "You had to do a dance, go up to someone you didn't know, and high five or say your name — introduce yourself — and then do partner exercises."

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After lunch, small groups of two girls, two boys, and an adult were formed. The goal was to have a group of students who did not know each other. The real work began with an exercise called "If you only knew," which encouraged students to express hardship and difficulties they had faced that ultimately determined their actions and interactions.

"It was so emotional. These kids were saying, 'Okay, I know I'm a bully, but you don't know that I've watched people around me using drugs.'" The children were also encouraged to share their hopes and dreams with others.

"The 'Cross the Line' exercise was the most intense," Magnusson said. "We were all in one big group and the leader would say things like, 'Cross the line if you've ever been judged by the color of your skin, or your weight, or your height,' or 'Cross the line if you've ever seen abuse in your home.' It was really powerful to watch all these kids who've been through so much already in their young lives."

The activities ended on a lighter and reflective note. Facilitators asked the children how participating in Challenge Day, and knowing what they now know, will change their actions and their minds in the future. Most children expressed empathy for their peers, said they would avoid being cruel to others, and, perhaps most importantly, said that they no longer felt alone and isolated.

Though the day was heavy, it was worth it. "It was very empowering for me," Magnusson said. "I think being an advocate definitely helped, because it's all about listening and getting them to talk about what they've been through and what they need. I can't wait until we do it again next year."

Business spotlight

Walmart is a big fan and supporter of the women and The Nest. Recently, they donated several strollers, car seats, a baby carrier, a bassinet and a portable playpen. According to June Shaunnessey, shelter supervisor, "These new baby items were desperately needed by residents. Thank you, Walmart, for being a consistent supporter of our families!"