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I drank coffee, he drank green tea, and we talked for hours about politics and change.When he told me that he read women writers because he couldn't relate to them, I should have fled then and there.Tinder's strength is that it easily tells you when there is a mutual attraction. For me, the benefits of using a dating app far outweigh its drawbacks.And rather than wishing on a star, I will take matters into my own hands, swiping right towards my next romance.In my late 40s, I never thought I would turn to a "hook-up" app for romance. After my marriage of 12 years ended, I spent most of the past decade building a successful career that allowed me the time and flexibility I needed to raise my son and assembling a close-knit circle of friends.Although my ex-husband and I co-parent our now 12-year old son, my son spends 75% of his time at my home.There were redundancy problems at work; my marriage was showing strains; and there was something large and unnameable missing from my life.

Many men act in ways I imagine they would if they were sitting across from me over dinner. My friend and I were sharing a hotel room at a weeklong business conference.After a day of dry lectures and an evening of happy hours and conference socializing, we were tired, a bit tipsy, and slightly giddy.On the flip side, many of the men are there for hook-ups.For every man seeking dating or romance on Tinder, there are probably 10 others seeking to hook-up, or to become friends with benefits.