An Invitation to Laura Hall, Banned from Drinking in the UK, to Drink Up All the Dollar Booze at Literary Upstart Tonight

This weekend, UK authorities issued an unprecedented two-year “Drinking Banning Order,” which prohibits her from “entering any pub, club, off-licence or bar” in all of England and Wales, or from “buying alcohol at any other establishment or shop, carrying it in an unsealed container or drinking it in a public place.”

The woman—Laura “Alko” Hall, 20; pictured, in a shot almost certainly taken from her myspace by an enterprising subeditor—had run up a marathon list of alcohol-related offenses: disturbing the peace, flouting bans, wearing a ring emblazoned with the word “Boozey” on it, etc…

Well, Ms. Hall. While you may be too drunk for England and Wales, you’re never too drunk for Literary Upstart. It’s short notice, I know, and European flights are still effed up, but still: we at The L Magazine would be very pleased to invite you to be our guest tonight at our Literary Upstart reading. The booze will be cheap and you’re not banned from drinking in this country (you have a fake ID, right? from your preteen days?), so we’re sure you’re down; and we are very, very eager to meet the woman ruled too much of a boozehound for the nations which produced Kingsley Amis and Dylan Thomas.