Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The end of Western Civilization is nigh.

As you may recall, NTS made his First Communion earlier this month. This is not why Western Civilization seems gravely wounded.

Being the sort of civilized people we are, we had a reception afterwards. This means that we sent invitations. And when you're dealing with someone (in this case the catering dept.) who has to figure out how many eggs, flour, butter and similar need be purchased for your post-Sacramental brunchfest, you need people to do the R.s.v.p. fandango.

Of course, you won't be surprised that with days to go, TFBIM was calling around to get an accurate head count to give the catering dept. A whopping two people had bothered to announce their attendance. At this rate, Western Civilization is wheezing and feeling woozy.

But it gets better.

We get back home -- I'll issue the details of the reception and the litigation-borne last-minute change in venue -- and NTS starts opening gifts. We jot down who gave him what and after waiting for the inevitable sorry-we-couldn't make-it gifts that arrived late, we schlepped to Crane's and ordered some thank-you notes in the same "pattern" as the invitations.

Here's the part at which I stand against the zeitgeist and point out to all concerned: "THAT. That's what the Hell I'm talking about." The sales assistant told me that I was the first person to come back to get thank-you notes out of +/- 50 families that had First Communions and got their invitations there.

Now, I realize that I live in a rarefied strata of society where saying, y'know, "thank you" is among the luxuries in which we indulge after oppressing the proletariat or imposing the antediluvian whims of the patriarchal hegemony. But only one out of 50? And here I thought we were slackers for waiting over a week to buy them.

Poppy Buxom posted at 7:59 AM, May 29, 2008
Don't read too much into this incident. You know how you are with the matchy-matchy? Where if Tiffany makes a nice necklace you buy it for your wife, and you also buy her the matching earrings, bracelet, tiara, and belly-button ring?

Well, the rest of us tasteless random slackers don't order special thank you notes. We write our thank you notes on our regular writing paper.

Joke posted at 8:45 AM, May 29, 2008
Te thing is that nobody had bothered to get ANY paper to send thank you notes, unless they are using standard 8.5" x 11" printer/copier paper.

Mind you, the one we got was the same (although I am all about the symmetry and consistency, this is not the reason why) because it was a 1st Communion thing, and for a boy and given those restrictions, the choices boiled down to a colossal one design.

Joke posted at 8:46 AM, May 29, 2008
P.S. For the first few minutes of signing, NTS yowled freely, but after that he settled down to a more placid sort of grumbling darkly under his breath. Still, he signed them all.