How to find a church to attend

Find a church to attend can be one of the best things you ever did. In my family we have a lot of religions: Catholic, Christian-non Catholic, Buddhist, Religious Science/New Age, and Judaism. We each came to our own decision based on our needs and background. Finding a church can be based on your geography. At one point I picked the church walking distance to my house because I didn't own a car. It was nice. I made some friends. The pastor was especially a very good bible teacher. I ended up attending for five years. It was a Baptist church. Although I never thought of myself as anything beyond main stream Christian, I guess any outside observer would have labeled me Baptist.

Things You Will Need

If you are going to attend a Baptist church and not be Baptist, you will need to be clear on what you do believe and what you are looking for. Lord knows if you are worried about going to hell, you better meet with the pastor of what ever church you are looking at and find out what the church doctrine really is.

My first experience with attending a church regularly, was in Hawaii at a nice Religious Science Church. Had I never left Honolulu, I would still be that religion. Instead I met my first husband. I met him AT that church. He was the guest musician. I thought we were the same religion. Actually he was a New Age believer who tried to convince me Unity Church, Science of the Mind and Religious Science were all the same thing. I wondered why they had different names if they were they same thing. Of Course THEY ARE NOT THE SAME THING! After moving to the mainland to be with my first husband I realized how little doctrine there is to Religious Science Church. Each Organization follows the charismatic leadership of the minister in charge. So speaking to the that person and interviewing them on their beliefs before you commit to membership is paramount.

Step 1

Search out all the religions and belief systems in your neighborhood. My oldest brother became Buddhist of all things. You may think things like B'hai or Islam or Hinduism are too far off the beaten path for you, but how will you know until you try? You might meet the nicest people in the world at such a temple or church. Even religions that traditionally do not convert will accept your eventually if you take classes and come to understand the belief system. I had a friend who became a Jew with a full bar mitzvah as an adult. It happens, and he is happy.

Step 2

If you want to know if a church is right for you get in there and volunteer for something. You'll never know if you hang out on the fringes, observing the group. Get involved, that's how you meet people. Even if you can't teach, you can greet or watch kids in the nursery, do paperwork in the office, offer to arrange flowers. There's no point to getting out of a nice warm bed on a Sunday unless you are invested in the project. The church IS the members after all, it's not the four walls.

Step 3

Bring your kids and spouse. Going to some other church than the rest of your family can be more divisive than bonding. For something that big in your life as your spiritual belief, include your loved ones. To that end, if you have teens, find a church with a thriving teen group. If you are married take a couples class with your spouse. Find a way to make it fun for everyone. Your kids are more likely to continue in your belief system if you endorse it whole heartedly. Participate in the bake sales and the camping trips and what ever the church has to offer.

Step 4

Stay away from churches that are too controlling or cult like. Stay away from churches that make you feel bad about yourself. Stay away from churches that ask for more than you have to give. If every week becomes all about the tithing and charity and you can't afford that, stay away. Beware that even the nicest people can become tempted by being put in a position of power. Men who went into the priest hood to help people are not immune to womanizing. Don't blindly follow authority. Use your God given discernment to get out of freaky weird situations if necessary.
Find a church that fits you, your lifestyle, your geography and your family. My son wanted to attend a church but it seemed to meet when he had to be at work. He ended up finding one that was closer to his home. Be reasonable. Be patient. It's not worth getting mixed up with the wrong people. Be open minded. I once went to a Hare Krishna temple, just to see. You know what, they ate some pretty good food. I came away with renewed respect for them, even though I still don't understand the hanging out at airports thing they used to do.

Tips & Warnings

Beware of the groups that won't take no for an answer. One time once, I went to a Scientology church and 25 years later they are still hunting me down and sending me literature. I think it's a bit over the top. I did not like the pricing scale they had attached to their arcane knowledge. Anyone can find a bible for cheap or free, not to mention the teachings of Buddha. I don't think spiritual knowledge needs to cost an arm or a leg.