From mud huts, umqomboti and straightback to penthouses, expensive weaves and moet!

Rumblings – Chapter Fifty One

I hate violence. It has never achieved anything for anyone and will never be the final solution. Lately it seems though I had in innate anger within me that was bursting at the seams. My sister had made a very bad joke which really was uncalled for and cold. The dear that. Had gone through me when she said my mother had had a stroke was so strong even now I was in a state of panic. The fact that my mother had said nothing to stop the fight shows that she too knew that my sister had been way it of order. Mich as this hurt this did not even compare to the pain I felt when she called Amo a bastard! People will not always remember what you said or did to them but they will always remember how you made them feel and for me this moment no matter what will be until the end of time. She had made me feel so cheap and in adequate. in history a bastard was a child born with no father to a woman who immediately became called a whore because she could not keep her legs shut and wait for a man to wed her. In some countries in the Middle East, Pakistan and parts of Nigeria and India women like me a stoned to death alongside their bastard for this. Being a single mother, only now, because we are so many has now become morally acceptable but even then, it is still considered shameful by many families and churches. My sister therefore calling my son that was not a trivial thing, she had stabbed me in the heart, reminding me of the betrayal by Mudenda all over again! Some things you really just don’t say no matter how angry you. It’s like telling a woman who was raped in a fight that,

“That why you got raped, you deserved it!”

That you can never take back. My sister had always been an ass and a bully but considering how much she had changed lately this I had not expected nor prepared myself for. I had let down my guard and softened towards her, my mistake!

Aurelia told me to calm down and my mother handed my bastard over to me. She told me that my sister was crazy I mist think nothing of it. I could see she was trying to hide her anger because when she tried to smile, the edges of her mouth just twitched and a full. Smile wouldn’t come out. It’s ok though. Aurelia then came and sat next to me as mother stood up to go look for her favorite daughter! I asked Aurelia to hold Amo for a few minutes I just needed some air. She agreed and I went outside. I needed to be alone to cry and I could barely hold back the tears. I wished I could scream it out as they do on TV but I could not. The tears though, it was like someone or something in side of me had died! A joke is a joke but putting an Arrive Alive sticker in a hearse is not funny! That was the point. A line had been crossed and even if she came back and said she had said it out of anger I would never forgive her for that. Words hurt more than fists which is why women especially when we fight, it is words we use to bring down an enemy and boy oh boy we know how to hold a grudge.

Five minutes later I went back inside and I heard my mother arguing with my sister for probably the first time in my life. She was shouting saying what she had said to me about her being sick was wrong and cruel. My sister started defending herself again saying that ever since I became a mother I thought I was so important. She was still my older sister and I was a child compared to her so I had no right to lay my hands on her! I am not sure what she expected me to do, smile and agree that she was a budding Trevor Noah? I am not sure really. My mothers voice kept on rising and rising until at some point she asserted her dominance. It was actually embarrassing now for me now that Aurelia was here to hear all this. I could not say go away because she had come with me whilst she had not seen it fit to say she had to go. Eish, at times people must read the situation. When you visit a person’s home and people starting arguing, you say bye and you leave. It’s only polite. Oh well it was too late now. She asked me if I was ok and I told her that I will live. She did not mention what my sister had done but I am certain by my reaction it was quite clear. I was embarrassed honestly on my sisters behalf. What a stupid girl!

There was a knock at the door, o crap! I had forgotten that Tidimalo had said he was coming. He definitely was not allowed to hear my mother cursing and swearing like that.
“Faith what’s wrong? What happened to your mom? I am so sorry!”

He said as soon as he walked in. Before I could even explain he pulled me into his arms and hugged. I could not even remember the last time I had been hugged by a man affectionately and I just sank into his warmth. He smelled good and his body squished into mine I just felt at home. No wonder why girls don’t like being single for long because usually having a man hold you and tell you that everything will be ok is better than all those lonely cold nights no matter what we tell ourselves in our feats of feminism!

“My sister lied Tidi, how could she do that? She lied just to get me to come home!”

I told him. He pushed me off him and said he did not understand. What was I talking about. I started to explain the situation and before I even got far in walked my mother. She had met him before, never liked him but which mother would. He greeted her and she greeted back. She said she needed some air and was going to take a drive. She will be back. I could see she was still angry but I was powerless to stop. Driving like this was not advisable.

Left alone Tidimalo greeted Aurelia and hugged her too but not as long as my hug. The jealousy that went through me though. I looked to see if there were any signs of deceit from them to me because I still suspected that something happened between them but nothing. He hardly spoke to her and spoke to me most of the time. Even when she spoke he was friendly but no particularly warm towards her. Evil as it might sound but this actually made me so happy inside.

Amo was crying now she needed to be fed. I announced this to everyone and Tidimalo said it was time for him to leave. I heard my mothers car come back and only now did Aurelia also say she had to go. She said it was family time and them being here at this moment would be an imposition! Wow, really! It’s very easy to make another girl suspicious because she was acting dodgy.

“I think it’s time you found yourself a place to stay! You don’t cook, clean, contribute and clearly don’t want to find a job! I can’t handle!”

Thank you for reading. I am a nurse (male) at Bara. We have been married for three years and are both 28 this year. I found out last week that my wife has been sleeping with a sugardaddy. She has a 55year old doctor from here that she has been cheating with. Last week her phone was freezing and I had to take it for fixing for her as she could not. However on my way there it switched on and that’s when I saw the messages. I have never been the type of husband to go through her phone but the phone came on and as it went on a message came in saying,

“I miss you baby!”

Obviously I looked and the entire chat history was there. I am not the perfect husband but I don’t drink, cheat nor beat my wife. I am never late and she has everything she needs I can afford. She met him when she came to visit me at work and he gave her a lift. I am destroyed. I don’t know what to do! There are men like me who love with everything that they have. I even thought of killing her and then myself but that’s stupid I know. I have not confronted her about it yet because I don’t even know where to start.

Please advise me, what should I do? We have a two year old by the way. My wife just got a job in retail a month or so ago.

59 thoughts on “Rumblings – Chapter Fifty One”

í ˝ thrmbatINGREDIENTthemba thcghzbxt
THEMBA. . Yo bhuti this is really sad shem.. no one deserves to be cheated on.. especially by this lucky lady who seems to me like she has herself a goodman in u.. yooo mara except greed n selfishness angazi wat to call what ur wife did to u. And since u married n hv a 2 year old kiddo I dnt think u can just easily decide to up and leave.. divorce a.k.a failure is just not an option. Not until mhlambe ke uv exhausted all ur options.. go get tested..confront ur wife.. then decide from der.. but if shes never cheated befor n its a once off thing- mayb u can try to talk to her. See how remorseful she is..decide if u wana forgive her and u can actually live wit ur decision. Then take it from der papa .. wish u ol d best.. may u make d ryt decision for ur childs sake and ur sanity . . Eish kubhlungu mani..

Thanx fOr the amazing stories! I always enjOy your writing but yOu shOuld get a proof reader, I’m happy to do it for you!:) The error of writing mudenda istead of Tidimalo could make the story turn out quite different infact ther are other errors but I dnt want to be like a broken record.

Friday Mayhem it seems for Fith’s sister it seems.. Thank you Mike and team

QnA : Eish bhut wam yanzima into yakho shame. Men find it hard to forgive when their women cheat than u women. Try and talk to your wife find out why she did what she did. I believe in getting to the root cause of the problem so you understand and then work on the forgiving. I know men and women cheat for different reasons. Much as this wont be a valid excuse as to why she cheated but you will need to face up to it and talk to her.

I say talk to someone else about this to calm you down a bit. So that when you eventually talk to your wife you will be in controll of your maotions and not be hasty.

Thanks Mikeesto, that line about arrive alive stickers on a hearse brought me to tears Lmao!! Daily dose.

Themba, I think I’ve heard of similar story yaz, wife goes to husband’s work and ends up dating one of the bosses, these wifes aint loyal. 3 years into this marriage, a two year old baby, and already banging on sugar sticks?? Eintlek what is on a womans right mind, except for money ofcourse in this instance? Coz obviously this 55 year old can’t compete sexually, unless he Brad Pitt looking… Argh! I’m never getting married ai!

Plan of action: Before you end up killing that sorry excuse of a woman, sit her cheap ass down and let it all out, personally I don’t think rehabilitation is possible after cheating, reconciliation maybe, but how you gonna even touch her without picturing some grey beared and wrinkled elder on her punani #Sick. I would say start custody proceedings as in yesterday, that’s what I would do, but maybe you aren’t as vengeful as me. Throw her out, pack her scrap and throw her out, let she retail her way into another place to stay, I’m sure sugargran has a spare flat somewhere. call a family meeting and expose her infront of her family, give all the nasty details even, let them choke on it for giving you such a rotten female to wife.

The last thing I would suggest is that you get some therapy, whatever makes you happy, weekend away to drink your sorrows away le magenge, a counselling session with a shrink, an encounter with a stranger at Diplomat Hotel in JHB CBD. Whatever tickles your fancy bro, you can’t afford to dwell much on this coz its gon’eat you up inside, and being exposed to so much medication, we’re don’t want you overdosing on some pills no!

Remember that NOT all Women are like this, even a bunch of potatoes has a rotten one amongst. But take time off and transfer your love to your child bro, Qina Ndoda.

#XenophobiaMustFall
#NoToXenophobia

I’m ashamed as a South African with what our fellow Africans are being subjected to, by a few narrow minded bunch of disgruntled citizens. Violence will never be OK for whatever cause. I stand in solidarity with those that call for #AfricaUnite

Ever thought of being a therapist? you know you would make 1 leave the room feeling so much better after talking to you, I hardly comment, but one thing for sure is that after I read the letter I look forward to your response if its not there I will refresh the page until I see your comment, you good with words……

Q n A: Buti Themba i think u must confront ur wife, tell her everything u saw on her phone. if she shows remorse maybe u can forgive her , but if she doesn’t u hv to decide what u really want. i knw its hard bcauz u love her & there is a child involved. Don’t kill her or urself, nomatter how u were hurt, ur heart will get healed.

Thank you Mike, I know exactly how Faith, I was once in a similar situation.

@Themba, I am currently dating a guy who went through a similar situation as you and he finally left his wife(now ex wife). He is not perfect but he is a great guy but our relationship has not been easy because I have had to prove myself to him that he can trust me. I agree with Jackzorro not all women are like your wife, what ever you decide you need to know that the is life after her. But you need to approach her and speak to her and maybe even involve the elders before making any decision.

Kodwa u Jackzorro or whatever his name is sucks sometimes, a man is broken and you advice him to go bonk a cheap woman from some filthy hotel is just not on seriously. some things are better not said honestly.

Themba my heart goes all out to you and i will pray for you. my advice is this, communicate with your wife before involving a third party and find out from her the reasons behind her cheating and not that there is any reason for justification but there is a reason behind every situation.

you know your wife better than us, weigh the goods she has done vs the bad things. there is forgiveness in this world but my advice is not to involve too many people in your situation, it might not turn up the way it should be and amongst everythings else, PRAYER HEALS. go with your wife for testing and counselling. remeber first time when you decided to marry your wife, there were reasons as to why do you want to marry her. LOVE conquers all. Good luck in your marriage and do good to your child.

@ Bontle I agree… But I shall not comment about Jack being a dick in the advices he sometimes gives.

I know one is entitled to their opinion but it seems some people choose not to think before they type.I fail to understand what goes into a man of Jackraro when he gives such comments. How can one be so oblivious and brazen to such a situation? There is a baby invloved!

You can not just leave someone because they have cheated, we all make mistakes some worse than other but running away should never be a solution unless you have tried to fix what ever is wrong up.

Marriage is tough and it needs one to always be humble and patient. FORGIVENESS HLE BATHONG TSHWARELO EBEILWE MO LEFASENG!

Look here wena… If that is a threat then by all means humour me. I aint scared of you in any way. I don’t know you nor do I give a toss who you are. I will put you in your place if needs be. You are rude most times and I will not be licking your ass just to make you feel like you are something nor to have you like me… To hell with that. I do not hate you… In fact I have no feelings towards you. Geez for a man whom cant get his dick up you sure do have a lot to say. Perhaps you degrading other people most of the time helps you sleep better at night or in a way helps boosts your ego but abuti weh for once if you have nothing good to say then shurup!

Maybe if you offer that stinky of yourz and I do lapses on it then we can put this issue to bed, literally. Do you get it or do you need some extra lessons?! Islungu aint an issue, ignorance on the other hand makes cumming to understand much difficult. So have a blast about my past lack of explosions, see if it tickles your clit…#Dusted.

Reading is a privilege and its sad that not all humans have such, due to illiteracy. With that being said, many people fail to understand what they read, just like people fail to understand instructions on an exam. Reading may indeed be classified as a skill, just like Listening, as is so regularly said. The art of reading comes into reading the unsaid, making conclusions between unwritten lines that seem blurred with no existence. Get the point even though the point is not written, or readable. Before you start commenting on the Diplomat aspect of my reply, did you actually get the examples that suit the writer? Which in all facts aren’t a weekend away, possibly not therapy or even as you put it ‘bonking’. Get off your Pep store pedestal and do you and let Jackzorro do him. Talk about Prayer Heals??? Dafuq are you smoking? Do you see Cancer victims being cured after praying? Such Fuckery Bontleza. Abo Love conquers all, get outta here #psss!!

Faiths mother mara i was starting to like Judith…the tough love decision is going to fuel the fire btwn her daughters…
@ Bhut Themba in the vows you took you said for better for worse and they dont define what the worse is although we all know the better…so bhut wam talk to your wife, dont think its anything that u did or did not do neither does it make you a faillure in any way…being married myself I’ve experienced that the weaknesses that one have, coming into a marriage can be exploited big tym by the devil when his trying to break up a marriage and your seems like a good kind of marriage, talk to a marriage counsellor, talk to your church priest but dont give up on your marriage and dont allow yoself to carry this burden yoself a lot of people are going through similar issues in marriages and the way you can over come it is by talking about it and let it out of your system

Faith jst get back with Tidimalo already,A2Qdamn lemmi jst nt coment coz wht I hv in mind is so nt gud.

NO to Xenophobia

I so wish we’d say this when orlando pirates was ill treated on caf away games,when a building colapse in Nigeria and they took their damn precious tym to bring wrong pple nd had the nerves to say we shoulnt open amabhokisi,I so wish pple would fight against those nigerians turning Dbn south point into drug I dnt knw wht nt to stop tht ish,I’d also request those in power to ask Malawian president to try nd be a leader not to gether all south africans in Malawi to hit the road for this to calm down coz if nt they’ll neva stop.nd this is happening more I dbn if bengayeka ukukhuluma nabantu lyk they are skul kids they won’t stop we are talking about zulus after all
#no 2 xenophobia

Infedility is a no no. Even the bible says infedility is a basis for divorce. Your wife doesnt respect you or your marriage. She is demeaning you at your workplace. It may not be easy but leave her, you are still young you do not deserve such filth in your life, its going to damage you and your son cheating is filth coz she is out there hoarding diseases to bring in the house, how do you forgive her and touch her without thinking of the Dr. Confront her infront of her family, confront her with divorce papers. Children grow up with divorced parents and its better they grow up with divorced but happy parents. File for custody, kick her out, if your job doesny allow you to raise your baby take the baby to your parents and see the baby when you free until such a time that he/she can go to boarding school, because your hours as a nurse are hectic. Do not let her have custody coz she can punish you through the child. It is time to start planning life without her.

I pray to God to give you strength. Im very sorry your marriage didnt workout but rather now than later, that fone switching on in your presence wasnt coincidence.

@ Lebo you seem to have missed MATTHEW 18.22 in your bible THAT PREACHES ABOUT FORGIVESS. Please read it and maybe you shall give a different comment. There it is in case you have misplaced your bible. It reads “Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” 22Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven’

Thanks again Mike. Its always a pleasure. Judith needs to grow up hai! I think mum is realising too late how spoilt she is. QnA. Confront her and take it from there, i.e. (A) Divorce, (B)Counselling (C)Dramatic route: revenge, lashing out etc. Obviously C won’t help anyone so rather A or B.

A2Q, It’s a tough one my brother… further complicated by the fact that it is someone you work with and in a higher position. Whatever you do, you must remember that killing her or you for that matter is not a solution and never will be. If your heart is big enough, I’d say forgive and find the root cause but if you can’t, think of your baby do what’s best for you… You should have forwarded their chat to yourself and then send it to the both of them so they know that you know and see what happens next. That old toppy with no morals might cause trouble for you at work so tred carefully with him.

@ Q & A
Themba bra i have been in the same situation as you, im not innocent myself i have cheated and still do but i was never caught for anything. but i have caught my wife via sms, whatssapp, BBM and emails with different men and said part is that she would deny these even though they were details and obvious, shes done this for years. She claims she has changed and i forgave her bt i dont trust her and it will probably take years for me to do so, bt i made my choice that i will stay with her provided she changes her way. Bra a marriage is worth fighting for, so if you love her confront her and forgive her, if she promises to change take her word for it bt ofcos keep an eye on her,she must earn your trust. God forgives and give us 2nd, 3rd and 10th chances everyday so who are we not to forgive. but if she is not remorsefull leave her bt try sort it out first. ive been in your shoes its not easy bra.

But’ Themba, I am glad there is still that 5% of men like you out there. Don’t change who you are. Big ups to you brother. To get to your problem, this reminds me of a conversation I had this week with my colleagues about marriage vows. @Shaz said something very true. When we make vows we say for better and for worse and we don’t put conditions on those better and worse days. Yes it is true that men are not as forgiving as us women. As hurt as you are right now by your wife’s actions, revenge is not the solution because in the process you will also hurt yourself and your bambino. Before you even involve family, sit down with your wife and find out from her what the reason is behind her going through this route. Whatever she says obviously will not justify her cheating but at least you will know. Married couples have a tendency of always running to families to report everything in their marriage. Rather go to them when the situation is out fo hand. Think what this will do to your marriage. You involve the two families, tomorrow you and your wife make up and whether you like it or not, your family will always see her as a cheating whore because of this one incident. This one you can handle by yourself bru or if you feel you want out, then you can involve the families. After talking to your wife, that is when you can decide what to do. Good luck my brother and I hope you make the right decision.

I have to agree with everyone about this xenophobia thing. As one of the South African women married to a Nigerian national, I must say it is not an easy thing. Not because of our relationship but because of people who have everything against foreigners. We deal with harrassment from police to next door neighbors and everyone but that only brings us more closer to each other. All these killings by South Africans, I am really disappointed and honestly not proud of calling myself a South African at the moment. We are so quick to forget. When our people were in exile in these countries, they were given shelter and they were taken well care of but today, the same people who took care of us are the people being killed. Very disappointing and disgusting indeed!!
#NoToXenophobia

Mike nna I am very confused. I thought Faith’s mother liked Tidimalo very much and approved of him instead of Mudenda so why now asa morate?

@ Themba my heart bleeds for you, I do not know why she cheated but alot of women are lost in the illusion of an older wealthy men making them more happier than an average man which is bullshit. Your wife is just greedy and a heartless person. However that being said none of us are perfect and I do not think you should end it with her. Confront her as communication is key in any relationship and work through your obstacles through the help of your pastor or a therapist.

Please also listen to Thobela FM this coming Sunday at 20.00. The Bishop of ZCC will be live and peaching about peace and forgiveness and hopefully through listening to him will in a way bring some healing.

Pray about this situation and pray for peace as well and forgiveness within your marriage.

Q&A Themba I hope you will be able to work thing through with your wife. The worst you can do in building a broken marriage is NOT COMMUNICATING when things aren’t going smoothly. communicate with your wife and let her know you know what she has been doing, also tell the 55year old Grandpa that you are aware that hes bonking your wife. goodluck in fixing your marriage, its still early into the marriage you are meant to be enjoying being parents and each other.

Enkosi bhut’Mike and team
Q&A, this is sad mara you wife is old enough to know that for every choice she makes there are consequences. people who cheat are just plain selfish coz they think of themselves and their selfish gain. anywho i’d say first think this through, talk to her even though that will not erase what she has done to you, your child and your marriage. people are telling you about the for better or for worse vow; what about the “i will forsake all others” that your wife had promised you in front of God and witnesses? sometimes we are very selective when it comes to such, how will forgiving her based on that vow help in this situation – i am not saying do not forgive her forgiving someone also set you free. speak to her, go for counselling, speak to your mfundisi and take it from there, wishing you all the best. strongs bhuti and wishing you all the best. ask God for guidance and wisdom – this cannot be easy.

Divorce is a big step think things thru and follow your heart bt violence is never the answer yes the bible says forgive bt it also says if one of you efeba than you can divorce your partner bt you cant re-marry again until your partner passes away you might divorce lana emhlabeni bt in God’s eyes you will still be one try talking with your partner and go for some councelling, with God you guys can pull thru this yes ulenzile iphutha kodwa judging from your letter u still love her follow your heart and try and fix things

Q&A… Dude u probably love your woman, she cheated yes, I’d suggest you take a break, I don’t say dump her, just take a break, see how will life be without her…… Spend time with your child brother, give your child the he/she deserves, people will tell you to dump her but they don’t know what you feel about her, like JackZorro says therapy may help bro…

Thanks Mike and team. Kay Vee I also say no to xenophobia but you talk about people who helped South Africans when they were in exile. Those South Africans who where in exile the lived in camps they did not take over their country. If anyone is to be blamed blame your goverment for letting this ppl to stay freely in our country. We are being taxed while they are not and they ara also making money here. We are being overcharged for medical aids to renovate hospitals whiles they go there freely. And the ppl that went to exile how many of them where they were they as many as those who are here. Some of them commits crime and they cant be traced because they don’t even have id’s.

I read JAckozorro’s comment and i must say he did not say he must do it he said he must spoil himself with whatever he likes while giving him options.

I must say though your opinion is yours and it Themba that can judge anyone here as this is his letter.
If you know a man that has been cheated on before you wouldnt be swearing at people but helping a man. These men become angry at the whole world and he needs to deal with it the sooner the better.

I love this man though. i actually had to go back to your first comment as i thought maybe i missed something. I must say some of us even me wish we can have your skills of thinking “fast”. keep being yourself you inspire us.

Hhayi bo Jackzorro, Uthini manje uma uthi u ain’t never getting married. Phela I have been behaving myself because I thought you were already married. Otherwise nami I would have pleaded my case to you a long time ago, twins and all.
A2Q: My dear, I’m really sorry you are going through this. You sound like a stand-up guy, husband & father. And you don’t deserve this. I think you need to make your wife aware that you know – call her out. And seek professional help if you still want to give your marriage another chance. This dude – very old – Solomon, in Eccl, had a thousand or so wives. However, he found 1 upright man in a thousand. But an upright woman…? He did not find. Not that there isn’t an upright woman, but whatever you are focusing on, may not be what you think it should be. Your wife is not what she should be, but killing her and killing yourself is a coward’s way out and maybe you’ll rob the world of a beautiful soul – yours – you sure sound like it.

#No to xenophobia. I feel pity for those who are married to amakwerekwere/foreign nationals/illegal immigrants. I understand that you might be desperate somehow, the clock is ticking heyy…..but I’d never stoop that low. I brt on the dry bones of my great grandfather!

Jackzorro I hope you aint serious about never getting married, Tjeerrrr I have hired a PI to find you and now you saying this. Whether you like it or not mina nawe soshada!!!

I have said this before, and I am saying it again, please bantu hlukanani noJackzorro. if you don’t like his comMents, go to the bathroom and wash your stinky punanis. Finish and Klaar. Yini kanti?
Pissed off for days.

Mike you are contradicting yoself and u also mix names…Instead of Tidimalo u said Mudenda. In a previous episode u said Faith’s mother liked Tidimalo and in this episode she don’t like him…Which is which kant??? Don’t u proof read before sending???

â€śThere are many single men out thereâ€ť â€¦..kwaaaaaa lol that line just kills me coz thereâ€™s really no such. Mamela ke anonymous, I know what you going through and it can be really hard because we as woman are emotional beings and this guy is playing with your emotions.

Thereâ€™s a big chance that he honestly loves you and wants to be with you but you have to understand that marriage is bigger than love and he canâ€™t just up and leave. What you need to do is make it clear to him that you want out or else you will involve his wife and tell her to put her him on the leash. Trust me, I know its hard but you have to stop entertaining him, donâ€™t answer his calls, donâ€™t reply to his text and if you have him on watsapp, delete his contact. Actions speak volumes maluv if he tries his nonsense after youâ€™ve made yourself clear about where you stand, then you can go all outâ€¦.I mean all out…umnyele cz naye uyakunyelaâ€¦you know what that means right?…yeah goodluck ke

Salute to Commander Adv Maphoto.
Stop fighting endlini! I think its tym W set a few house rules. Rule No.1: No name calling. If U fight, then fight wth facts not about someone’s ability or lack thereof. W can create mo rules as W go.
Q&A: Killings as someone said is such cowardly way out. U wil deny yo kid a loving father. I wud suggest that U take a break from each other. After confronting her either U move out or she moves out. The baby can go with the U or the mother it doesn’t matter as long as U can visit etc.
Parents/relatives will eventually know no matter how hard U try 2 hide it. After a month or so U can think rationally & make a DECISION. Let it B yo decision alone bcz whatever it is U might have 2 leave the rest of yo lyf with it or might leave 2 regret it later. Yes U wil need 2 forgive her eventually as this will also free U inside but no 1 must push U 2 either take her back or divorce her. Let it B yo decision as UR the 1 feeling that pain alone.
I feel 4U but qina ndoda. Marriage is no child’s play. – PapaG.