Friday, September 27, 2013

The Hunger Games (aka FFAQ)

(I forgot to mention--you know how I lost my keys a couple of weeks ago? Well, guess where they were. Weightwatchers. Oops.)

It means I spend the day writing.

It means Lolly and I will go out together tonight and reconnect after a long week

But most importantly of all, it means it's time to ask some questions for FFAQ!!

If you're new here, let me break it down quickly:

FFAQ (Friday's frequently asked question) is a chance to either pose a question you'd like answered, or vote on another person's question that you find interesting by commenting with the word "ditto". The question with the most "dittoes" is the one that I am obligatedprivileged to answer. There aren't a lot of rules, and the system works pretty well. Don't cheat. You can ditto more than once, but only once per question. Ask your question early. Don't be afraid to post a question that was posed previously. Winning questions are usually asked within three hours of the post going up, and tend to be simply worded, relatively short, and very clear. The winner gets a shout out, so be sure to link to something you want pimped out. (It always makes me sad when, like last week, the question-asker has chosen to be anonymous and I can't highlight any of his or her stuff.)

Questions can be about anything really. Most of the time they are about gayness, but some of my favorites have been about other random things as well. And don't worry if you ask a question and it doesn't get a bunch of dittoes--I've used various questions with very few dittoes as the basis for later posts simply because they were excellent questions. Moods change. One FFAQ a particular question might get only a few dittoes, only to get enough dittoes to win the next FFAQ. There is no rhyme or reason here, and it's probably better that way.

Oh, also, the winning question will be answered on Friday of next week. Then the next week we ask questions. And so on and so forth, into perpetuity.

Are you ready for this?

WAIT. We need our logo. *rustles notes to find it*

Okay. All is right in the world now.

LET THE QUESTIONS AND DITTOES BEGIN!

(Is it weird that I just felt a little bit like Effie Trinket on The Hunger Games right then? Be careful out there guys. Don't accidentally murder each other with your dittoes.)

Do you believe people are born "gay?" And secondly, why would God do that? It seems unfair. (side note: when I was 6 my mom left our little family for another woman. I've been fielding these questions for years. I know what I say. What do YOU say?)

I've struggled with my sexuality for about a year now. I'm 20. I know what my heart wants but my head tells me it isn't possible for me. In the midst of all of this, most of the news and writing on this subject (mixed orientation relationships) is all but positive. What would you recommend to keep my spirits high and my pathway 'straight' (get it). Only my mother knows I struggle.

I know same-sex marriage is a hot topic right now, but what about other aspects of the "gay rights movement"? What are your thoughts about it being legal to be fired or be denied housing because of one's sexual orientation and gender identity in most states in America? What about how some states don't have added protection/punishment for hate crimes against non-heterosexual/non-cisgender individuals?

Josh, so many people have misconceptions about "Gayness" and it saddens me when people act like they should recoil when they hear the word. I know many wonderful people who happen to be gay. What do you LIKE aout being gay or your "gayness"? What can be gained by keeping our loved ones and friends who are gay close? Or why be open to befriending someone who is either suspected of being or is openly gay?

I doubt that this will get dittos but I'm curious about how making so much of your personal life effects your work with clients as a therapist. By nature of the job you don't generally self disclose much about your life but I'm wondering what that looks like for you?

Do you and Lolly have friends other than each other and your daughters? You seem to have a unique personality. Do you ever feel shy or self-conscious because of that? I have the impression you did as a teenager, but how about now?

Do you and Lolly have friends other than each other and your daughters? You seem to have a unique personality. Do you ever feel shy or self-conscious because of that? I have the impression you did as a teenager, but how about now?

You've written before about the fact that you have struggled with your weight since childhood. Do you think that having a healthy, loving relationship with Lolly has helped you to overcome that? Going to Weight Watchers meetings together is wonderful! What advise do you have for other people who have an unhealthy relationship with food?

I'd like to know what was the naughtiest thing you ever did as a kid. I know, I know. You were probably a good kid. So was I. (I was the best Mormon girl.) But even we good kids have a few stories to tell. So what is it? If you have a story about getting into some shenanigans, I'm sure we would all love to hear it.

I probably won't get as many votes on my question since it's Sunday night (Well, Monday morning) and it's not centered around gayness. Frankly, Weed, I'm kind of tired of thinking about your gayness. No offense. Also, I've had a really bad week. And by that I mean bad even for this year. And also, let's be honest: You're the administrator of this blog and you can choose whatever question you want. And so I would encourage you to continue to dodge the question about legalization of gay marriage and instead tell me what was the naughtiest thing you ever did in high school (or whenever).

Are you new here?

Oh hi.

I am Josh Weed.

I am a gay, Mormon man who is married to a woman. I have four daughters, one of whom is not featured in the photo on the header of this blog because she wasn't born yet. When she's old enough to realize this she's gonna be pissed, but as of now she can't talk yet, so I'm rolling with it.

I am a Marriage and Family Therapist who is licensed through AAMFT (the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists), a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist trained through IITAP (the International Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals), and was named the Best Father Ever from TAOITMKTSTOITATST (The Association of I Told My Kids To Say That Or I'd Take Away Their Screen Time).

This website is my personal blog. I write serious posts and humorous/satirical posts. You'll probably very easily tell the difference, but if you're ever wondering, just ask. Sometimes as I write this blog, I might talk about therapy concepts. I might mention things that I've learned in my grad studies. I might share thoughts I'm having around things I'm reading, or ideas I hope will be helpful. When that happens, please know that I am offering my thoughts as a fellow human writing on his personal blog, and not as your personal therapist, or even as a professional giving professional advice. Grain of salt, is what I'm saying. Always consult (and pay for!) a professional's opinion when making therapeutic changes in your own life.

So yeah. That's how things go around here. Some days you'll get a post on a serious topic I happen to be thinking about. Other days you'll get a post about me crapping my pants on a morning run.

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...The weed stood in the severed heart."What are you doing there?" I asked.It lifted its head all dripping wet(with my own thoughts?)and answered then: "I grow," it said,"but to divide your heart again."