Greetings, Dicks. I'm Doctor Ashley Tagg... although some of my students have recently taken to calling me "Doctor Hashtag". I don't know why.

It can't have escaped your attention that we are on the eve of an historic, three-way, decision: whether to leave, opt out from, or depart the European Union, or "Eu-U".

Before you take to the polls today, I want to draw your attention to the real risk facing Britain today, a phenomenon discovered by my dear friends, the Chan quadruplets, from the University of Beijing (the students call them "4Chan" - I don't know why).

That phenomenon is the real and present threat of massive migration from the continent. Here I present for you today a picture of what Britain will become if we do not vote to leave. I thank you with all my heart for giving me this opportunity, and I wish you the very best in your endeavours.

If we do not close our borders, this is the Britain we shall have: a country overrun by enormous Continental migrants. These literal giants, these towering mutations, shall flood our towns and villages with their massive way of life, looming over our high streets, and pointing and frowning at our trains.

how churlish to suggest pro-brexit is down to xenophobia. For myself, it's a matter of resolution. No thankyou to one size fits all political solutions. Rule of thumb, if dodgy Dave wants it, then there's something amiss

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Hamptonoid

23/6/2016 12:30:53 pm

Yes, we should all throw our lot in with not-at-all-dodgy Trump, all-round-good-egg Boris, and bemused-ale-guzzler Farage.

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Ima xenofobe brexitz lul

23/6/2016 02:24:19 pm

Haha true. Ultimately politics is riddled with scum. Perhaps we should try and make our choices based on the high level premises, instead of cherry picking villains and having it play out like some lame-o pantomime