(Parental Discretion Advised)

Monday, June 29, 2009

On of my pet peeves is when people write as they speak- complete with trying to spell their accents or dialects or whatever. This has bothered me forever, but I think it started when I was in high school and had to read "The Invisible Man". I could not follow it at all. I was trying to sound out the words to figure out what they were, and I just went crazy. That was the first time I ever purchased Cliff Notes instead of reading the actual book!

I think when you read a book, a blog, an email, anything, you should be able to just read it, and not have to stop and figure out what the words actually are.

Why am I ranting about this now? Yesterday I was reading some stamping info online, and clicked on a link to learn about a new product. Unfortunately the link led to a blog- and not the post in question, just the blog in general, so it went to the newest post. I had to scroll thru pages of info trying to find what the link was about. (This is also a pet peeve. HA! Rant within a rant again!) When I finally got to the part I was interested in, this is what I had to wade thru:

****Since it is Summah and since we need WATAH and lots of it… We researched and researched and found THIS one to be DA bestest one EVAH.

Mwah to dasistahs who are THIRSSSSTY!

What a great EVE of dabirFday

WINNAHS

SISTAHS

*****

What language is this anyways??? Anyone? It sure isn't American. You don't see me blogging in a Minnesota accent or slipping into a Yooper twang suddenly. I couldn't stand to read the blog, and you know for sure I won't be back.

Don't even get me started on using texting in your writing. When you are blogging, emailing, writing freaking school papers, use AMERICAN. No "c u l8r" or such. I think this is all part of the dumbing down of America, no?

Please comment without crazy spelling to show your accent, coolness, or anything else.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Unless you watch the Fox Reality channel like I do, you may have missed this hilarious show.

"Sex Decoy:Love Stings" is on on Saturday nights, and is very amusing. I even want the fabulous tramp stamp shown in the opening!

The show focuses on a single mother with bleached and brittle blond hair. She also seems to wear a LOT of wigs, because her hair length and style changes often. This wonderful lady was apparently cheated on by her husband, so she started a company in Arizona called "Mate Check". Basically, if you think your mate, fiance, lover, friend, whatever, is cheating on you, you can call them and they will find out- by seeing if the suspected cheater takes the bait.

The mother is assisted by her three daughters, who despite their not-so-glamorous appearances, are successful strippers. The mom is trying to get them out of stripping by getting them to work as decoys in her business. (Not sure why that is perceived as "better" than stripping!) The man in charge of tech is the mom's live-in boyfriend.

The show starts with someone calling for help. They have a consultation, determine the target's schedule and "type" (to cheat with) and then set up a scenario to tempt the target. They put cameras up in the sting zone, park outside in a large motor home with the person who hired them and watch the action.

The show gives lots of people and lifestyles for the viewer to stare at and be stunned by, so I love it. HA!

My dad has no problem spraying poison on bugs outside of the house, but is not allowed to be spraying poison inside the house, so when he discovered ants entering the house via the doors (of course) he told me to come up with a "no chemical" solution.

After consulting my various books and such, I found that peppermint oil is a great deterrent. The papers I consulted suggested putting a few drops on cotton balls and leaving them at the entrance point. It didn't seem like the best idea to line our doorways with cotton balls, lol, especially since we were expecting a small boy, who eats anything he finds since he can't have actual food, to visit the next day. So I made a spray instead. I did my usual 4 oz cobalt glass spray bottle, adding 40 drops of peppermint essential oil and filling with purified water. I shook it well, then sprayed it all along the bottoms of the doors. (My sister thought I may have missed a spot and also sprayed the bases of the doors when I finished.) I did see some of the teeny tiny ants when I sprayed, but by the time my sister sprayed, a minute later, they were gone.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

I read a book this week that I loved. If you are like me, you may have wondered why the Bible says "there is neither male nor female in Christ" in one part, and then that women should sit down and be quiet in church, saving any questions for their husbands later, in another. Or how a book written hundreds of years after Jesus, then copied and recopied thru the centuries, could remain accurate. If so, I have the book for you.

"Misquoting Jesus : The Story Behind Who Changed the Bible and Why" by Bart D. Ehrman

Let me start by saying the author is seriously smart, and knows his subject. He has a number of degrees, spent his life studying the Bible and ancient literature, and learned the original languages so he could read the old manuscripts. Yet, the book he wrote is in... PLAIN ENGLISH. Nice, hey? Easy to understand, easy to read.

He starts by explaining how the manuscripts was copied by illiterate scribes, and how they changed it thru the years, both by accident or on purpose. One interesting fact is the original Greek manuscripts were written in all capital letters, with no spaces or punctuation. So if you were translating "GODISNOWHERE" do you write "God is now here" or "God is nowhere"?It depends on the beliefs of the person doing the copying, hey?

One part that made me laugh dealt with Jerome's Latin (Vulgate) Bible. Even tho the translation is plagued with problems, it was the most common one used for a thousand years. The author states:

" Scholars throughout Europe- including Biblical scholars- had been accustomed for nearly a thousand years to thinking that Jerome's Vulgate was the Bible of the church (somewhat like some modern churches assume that the King James Version is the "true" Bible)."HA!

Most interesting to me was the chapters on theological debates amongst the early Christians and how the scribes added (or deleted) parts of the manuscripts to support their views. One debate was on the role of women in the church-1 Corinthians 14 33-36, for example, was NOT written by Paul, and not part of the original text. It was added so women would "know their place". The author also explains clearly all the reasons why scholars have come to this decision.

Friday, June 19, 2009

A while back my niece picked some "dora" or "hannahmontana" (or some brand like that) press on nails as her treat when we were shopping. She was really upset after trying them because they flew off as soon as she put them on. I told her that if her mom said it was okay, I would buy her some nail glue, and that would hold them on better.

After she called and said her mom was okay with it, I checked at Wal for the glue. I ended up buying a brand that was "buy one, get one free" cuz I thought it would be good for holding my nails together when they break way down low and start cracking across the nail. One for her, one for me! I also bought her acetone polish remover, cuz it said on the glue you need it to remove the fake nails. While I was picking these things out, I saw they had a huge display of fake nails... in all lengths, plain and fancy... and I started thinking about them.

I have crummy nails. I got them from my mom. I have tried a million things to strengthen them, and nothing works. Trust me- between me and my mom, we have tried it all! My nails get a little length, then break or split or peel and I end up having to trim them down to the quick. I have always been jealous of people with nice nails. I haven't gotten fake nails from a salon tho, cuz I am pry allergic to them and they take a lot of upkeep. Plus I heard they make your actual nails way weaker and thin so when you get them taken off you are left with nothing. Basically, once you start, you are stuck.

SO, the fake glue on nails intrigued me. The next time I was at the store, I got some short length french manicure nails. It was a "free double" pack, so there was 48 nails total. Sadly I seem to have very large nails, so I had trouble picking the ones that fit once I got home. Even with the double pack, the majority were tiny and didn't fit any of my nails! I did manage to finally pick out one for each nail, and glued them on.

** Note- my sister STILL has my camera, so these were taken with my phone. Sorry!**They looked great! Not too fake, a nice pale pink with white tips. They weren't too long, either. In fact, the pinkie, my strongest nail for some reason, was barely longer than mine. I loved them.

Until the next morning when I realized one was missing and I had to find one that fit and glue it on. Over the next three days, I had to glue back on at least seven nails. I was obsessed with checking them to make sure they were all on. I started carrying nail glue in case one fell off. It was very tiring. But, no one noticed they were fake!

I keep them on for three days. I wanted my nieces to see on Sunday. Then the stress was too much so I tried to take them off. Yeah, tried. They pop off at will until you want them off! The glue directions say to soak in acetone nail polish remover. Well, acetone seems to eat thrudixie cups, so I was stuck with one nail in the cap of the remover. I soaked for a half hour, realized the nails seemed to be melting, but still did not come off, got bored and tried to pick them, tho the instructions say DON'T. They mean it. DON'T!

I ended up taking off a few layers of nail on my middle finger. The whole mess took an hour to get off totally.

I do NOT recommend glue on nails. Ever. :)

Oh, by the way, the glue sucks for holding split nails together. Holds for like an hour, max. Sigh.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

I haven't blogged for a while, cuz my sister has my camera, so I will have a lot of projects to post when I get it back.

I recently purchased a few new crochet books, two of which I love. The first is "Kyuuto! Japanese Crafts: Anigurumi". It contains patterns for cute little animals. They make great baby gifts, or even for bigger kids who like stuffed animals.

The second is "Creepy Cute Crochet", which contains patterns for freaky stuffed toys like "vampire queen" and "corporate zombie".

I made a few of the animals for baby gifts, then showed the books to some of my niblings. The girls loved the first book, and all picked out animals for future birthday gifts. (They ranged from age 6 to 10.) They HATED the creepy designs.

Then I showed the books to a four year old boy. He liked the animals and picked out the jack rabbit as his favorite. They I gave him the creepy book. He LOVED it. He had to stare at every single page and discuss details about the dolls, and he said he wants every single one. :) I had to laugh. (note: he does still want the jack rabbit tho.) We spent an hour pouring over the details in the book, especially the weapons.