Before Roasting That Raccoon, Think About Your Brother

All Adam Eubank's brother wanted to do was barbecue a raccoon. He did not intend to get anyone into trouble. But police heard about the raccoon-meal preparations—which took place out in the open, behind their apartment building—and found some buckets of "an unknown material" related to meth-making on the premises. And so the night was ruined.

Unnamed raccoon-cooking Brother Eubank remained free, but Adam Eubank ended up behind bars—charged with promoting meth manufacturing. An ABC News reporter stopped by their place to to talk to them, but neither brother answered the door. She did get to chat with several neighbors, though, including one man who claims that the Eubanks are known as the "Squirrel brothers" for their squirrel-skinning activities. They will probably be referred to a few other names as a result of this incident.

We learned several lessons as a result of the Eubanks' ordeal. In order of importance: One, Don't cook your raccoon near your brother's meth lab, unless you want him to go to jail. Two, don't operate a meth lab, unless you want to go to jail. Three, don't skin squirrels in public, because the neighbors will gossip about you. Following these simple rules will make your life easier, of this we're fairly certain.