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Fun wit da 4 1 9

This was a ridiculously retarded day, so I decided to play with one of the 419 scammers. I got 3 new ones today and rather than delete, I set up a phony e-mail account and had fun. We'll see if I can be as clever as my new hero Wendy Willcox. Only time will tell as the story unfolds, eh? (I imagine I might get bored after a while, so who knows?)

Anyway, here's how it started... typical spam... guy says his name is Ladan Mohammed and "I WORK WITH THEINLAND BANK OF NIGERIA PLC AS A GROUP HEAD TREASURY DEPARTMENT.

IN THE DISCHARGE OF MY DUTY, I STUMBLED ON THISDOMICILIARY ACCOUNT THAT HAS REMAINED DORMANT FOR THREE YEARS NOW WITH EIGHT MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS ($8.5M) IN IT. ON PERSONAL INVESTIGATION, I DISCOVERED THAT THEACCOUNT HOLDER DIED IN AIRCRASH ACCIDENT WITH THE MEMBERS OF HIS FAMILY WHO SHOULD BE THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE AMOUNT... NOTE THAT MY PURPOSE OF CONTACTING YOU IS BECAUSE THE DECEASED HAS THE SAME NAME WITH YOU."

Sorry, but the likelihood of someone in Nigeria having the name Liz Erk is probably as big as this guy is telling the truth.

I went and set up a phony e-mail with the name of Dana, deleted references to myself and said, "Dear God! How can I help?"

I got this whole crazy reply about how I should travel to Nigeria, blah blah blah.

So Dana replied:

"Hi Ladam,

Pleased to meet you, I truly believe this endeavor will be mutually beneficial to everyone.

I'm a little concerned about doing business with someone I do not know. Can you send me a picture of yourself? Or one with you and your family? I've enclosed one of myself. I am a devoted Christian and it would mean everything if I could pray each night with your picture by my side. You see, I really felt this was fate because my husband, the CEO of a major Rhode Island oil drilling company recently died a terrible death. He fell asleep on some train tracks and, well, it took Amtrak 6 hours to pick all of his pieces up.

I am a single woman without very much money. A trip to Nigeria would be costly. I do not have any children, but I am a french fry maker for a corporation called McDonald's. Mr McDonald told me that if I work 7 days a week for 2 years, I'll get a raise from $6.00 to $6.25. I need to really work hard, so I can't miss work. I can't hire an attorney because that's costly. Perhaps you can advance some of the dead guy's money and hire me an attorney?

And please send me a picture so that I can pray to make the right decisions. I want to help, but I'm not sure..."

*Note: I grabbed the first pic I saw off a mullet site.

He replied:

>From: ladan mohammed <ladanmoha@yahoo.com>>To: Dana >Subject: I AM WAITING FOR YOUR CALL>Date: Sat, 12 Jul 2003 09:15:09 -0700 (PDT)>>>Dear Dana,>>Thanks very much for your mail.>Your suggestion is well accepted and i will send my>international passport to you by monday because we>only work half days on saturdays.>>That is why i can't send it now as i am on my way to>home.Please try to call me for us to talk well>concerning what we are havibg at hand.>>As i am also expecting you to send your phone numbers>to me as it will please me to call you also.>>I will give you detalis on monday.>>I expect your call.>>Thanks,>>Ladan

Dana replied:

"Sadam,

I can not call you, as I told you, I don't have enough money to afford extras. I don't have a phone. The utility company shut it off a month ago. Can you send me money to turn it on? Or maybe can you send me a cell phone? I'm at the library checking my mail on a public computer.

Please send a picture so that I can pray to our Lord. I believe God has brought me to you. Can you get me a husband too? I am so lonely and need some love. And maybe a small cactus plant.