Guestpost: “Kissing, Waxing and the Chicken Ring Theory” by A Mom Two Boys

I have this thing about trying to find something good out of a situation, even when it’s mostly crap and the good sometimes has to be really lame, like “well, it could have laid eggs in my ear!”

Sometimes it’s not so hard to find the good thing.

When my dear friend Heather lost her daughter this year, I would have been hard-pressed to say anything good could come out of it…but I will tell you this, I got to meet Meghan for the first time, I got to see what an amazing person she is {and so dang tiny and cute and pocket-sized and I wanted to put her in my carry-on luggage and keep her forever} and know that there is nothing she won’t do for a friend and THAT was a very good thing.

It’s not often you get to see someone in action and think, “THAT’s the kind of friend I want to be.”

I got to see that in Meghan.

And? She’s teh funny! So, enjoy.

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When Anissa asked me about guest posting, my first thought wasn’t YAY! It was “SH*T. What in the hell am I going to write about?!”

So that’s pretty much what I said to Anissa. With a lot of “WAAAHHH” and “The PRESSURE!” added in.

To which she replied:

“Write about anything you want…ANYTHING…your first kiss, the last time you had a waxing, chicken nuggets, 105 things you can do with peanut butter, the time in high school when you….”

So, of course, my logical response was: “I’m going to write about ALL THOSE THINGS!”

My first kiss:

I don’t actually remember my first kiss. That’s kind of sad, isn’t it? I mean, I’ve seen pictures of my first *technical* kiss, with PJ Carosella, when I was a toddler. But as for my first REAL kiss where I was all fluttery and nervous and AWESOME? I don’t remember.

The first boy I remember kissing is Billy Lilly (Yes, that’s his real name, and YES, his parents knew what they were naming him, he was a Junior). He was my boyfriend in 8th through 10th-ish grade. We had a long, occasionally stormy relationship. His mother hated me, his sister once described how she was going to kill me (something about bashing my head into her knee, if I remember correctly). But OH, how I loved that boy. He was Captain of the Football team (a running back, #23), and a track and field super star. An all around, nice, good, goofy boy. He could always make me laugh. This is us one Homecoming:

I’m petite, he’s anything but. What of it?

We were both on the Homecoming Court. Adorable, no?

He’s married now and expecting his first baby, a girl. I commented on his Facebook status that I shouldn’t probably laugh as much as I did about that. Heh.

Waxing:

The only thing I get waxed is my brows. And I LOATHE doing even that. Not because of the pain, but because the damn waxer spends 95% of the time breathing on me. And I HATE when people breathe on me. I’m getting the chills just thinking about it, so I’m going to move on.

Chicken Nuggets:

My boys are obsessed with chicken nuggets. They’re a dinner staple at our house, and most often come in the form of dinosaurs or mickey mouse. YUM-O. Yesterday at the grocery store, I noticed something called “Chicken Rings.” Chicken in the form of an onion ring. Now, I’m ALL ABOUT the chicken nugget and the onion ring. But chicken as a ring? Kinda creeps me out. I shuddered a little and walked away.

When I got home, I talked to my mom about what food the boys would eat at her house when we’re there this weekend. And she told me that Grandpa Dick had JUST purchased some Chicken Rings for the boys to enjoy. Suh-weet. I guess we’ll let them decide!

105 Things to do with Peanut Butter:

Don’t worry, I’m not going to list 105 things. In my opinion, there are only TWO things you should do with peanut butter:

Eat it (a big old spoonful is one of my favorite ways, or on some bread drizzled with honey.)

That time in high school when I:

Called my friend’s parents because she was drunk and throwing up and I didn’t want to have her in my mom’s leather upholstered car for the 30 minute drive home. They were cool about it, but I’m pretty sure she never forgave me for it. Oh well, I’d do it again.

Sigh. Now I’m nostalgic about high school.

Sadly, I’ve eaten one too many processed chicken nuggets since those days to look this good in the dress anymore:

Anissa, i love your intro. The pocket sized line is still cracking me up. Sorry Meg.

Hey Meghan? Do you hold your breath the whole time they are waxing your eyebrows? Cause I hate them breathing on me and I have tried to not breath the entire time. Doesn’t work, but I try. i hate that. ps. if you still fit into that dress, i will cry. Swearz. Luff you.

you are too darn cute in those pictures! i think i would have been jealous of you in h.school. NOT that you aren’t cute anymore– i’ve just matured a great deal and no longer feel the need to be mad at petite and pretty girls. have a blast rocking the sequins.