As a first class curmudgeon, it falls on me to tell you how much it disturbs me that YULE LOG CAKES are commonly decorated with candy mushrooms. Why is this disturbing? Well, mainly because these cake generally look like big logs of crap.

It isn't really appetizing to me. If we are talking about magic mushrooms, well, that's different. Those are supposed to sprout from piles of cow shit. In any case, any log related cake should not be festooned with fake mushrooms dusted with cocoa powder.

Well, it would appear that Peter Jackson's new Hobbit trilogy is causing some viewers to puke from the 3D motion and the 48 FPS that spools twice as fast as a regular movie.

There is nothing worse than going into a movie theater to the smell of freshly mopped vomit. You know that smell. It's a mixture of Pine-sol, bile and parmesan cheese. It will be interesting to see if this epidemic is an isolated issue or if the puke fest will continue when the film opens later this month.

One solution might be to not see it in 3D, but if the frame rate is the problem, well, you might be shit out of luck. Best to be prepared. Popcorn buckets make good vomit receptacles.