Yoda

"Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is."―Yoda, to Luke Skywalker

Counted the Stars

Counted the stars on the 4th of JulyWishing we were rockets bursting in the skyTalking about redemption and leaving things behindI have these pictures and I keep these photographsTo remind me of a timeThese pictures and these photographsLet me know I'm doin' fineWe used to be so happy once upon a timeOnce upon a timeBut the sun sank west of the Mendocino County LineAnd the sun sank west of the Mendocino County Line

""SOME SEE A GLASS AS HALF FULL, SOME SEE IT AS HALF EMPTY, I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHO’S DRINKING MY RUM."

Rumbear

Sunday, February 03, 2013

THINGS I DIDN'T LEARN IN HEBREW SCHOOL

1. The High Holidays have absolutely nothing to do with marijuana.2. Where there's smoke, there may be salmon.3. No meal is complete without leftovers.4. According to Jewish dietary law, pork and shellfish may be eaten only in Chinese restaurants.5. A shmata is a dress that your husband's ex is wearing.6. You need ten men for a minyan, but only four in polyester pants and white shoes for pinochle.7. One mitzvah can change the world; two will just make you tired.8. After the destruction of the Second temple, God created Nordstroms.9. Anything worth saying is worth repeating a thousand times.10. Never take a front row seat at a Bris.11. Next year in Jerusalem. The year after that, how about a nice cruise?12. Never leave a restaurant empty handed.13. Spring ahead; fall back - winters in Boca.14. WASP's leave and never say good-bye; Jews say good-bye and never leave.15. Always whisper the names of diseases.16. If it tastes good, it's probably not kosher.17. The important Jewish holidays are the ones on which alternate side of the street parking is suspended.18. Without Jewish mothers, who would need therapy?19. If you have to ask the price, you can't afford it. But if you can afford it, make sure to tell everybody what you paid.20. Laugh now, but one day you'll be driving a Lexus and eating dinner at 4:00 PM in Florida .

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Guinness for Strength.Jameson for Courage.

Definition and difference

‎"A liberal is a conservative that hasn't been mugged yet." Also, "If you are not a liberal at 18 , you have no heart. If you are not a conservative at 40, you have no head.

Thought for the current times

"We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and then bid the geldings to be fruitful."--CS Lewis--

Political Correctness Explained

Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.