Kitchen at the End of the Universe: The Peace Burger

What a time to live in. As if dealing with the increasingly bizarre political situation at home isn’t enough, we now also have to deal with a narcissistic yellow-haired toddler threatening an unstable dark-haired toddler with nuclear war. Anyone that has seen Dr Strangelove will know that nuclear war is a shit idea. Somehow these two need to find some common ground (not including the fact that they’re both batshit crazy). So, might I suggest The Peace Burger…

Burgers most likely originated in Germany, but is now as American as apple pie and mass shootings. It’s easy to make, and infinitely customisable. But Americans also like to fuck it up quite spectacularly. Koreans on the other hand are known for their restraint, good manners, and diligence. So maybe it’s time to combine the best features of the two, and make a burger that can transcend the differences.

The basis of this burger is a basted patty, served with Sriracha mayo. It’s quick to set up, and very easy to make. Keep the patty simple and straight-forward, and use good quality mince. For the patty, you’ll need:

150g – 200g pork and beef mince per patty

1 onion, grated

Salt and pepper

For the basting, you’ll need:

½ cup soy sauce

3 cloves garlic, crushed

1 tbsp grated ginger

1 tbsp Sake/rice wine

¼ cup muscovado sugar

2 tsp sesame oil

To assemble:

Bread rolls

Sliced cabbage (I prefer purple, because it’s purple)

Sriracha mayo

Combine all the patty ingredients in a bowl, and form into a patty. Try not to handle the mince mix too much, as you don’t want it to go all mushy. You don’t need to add a binding agent (e.g. eggs), as the pork mince will do that job. Let the patties rest for a bit while you prepare the basting.

In a saucepan, combine all the ingredients except the sesame oil, and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and let it simmer to thicken. It’s ready when it can coat the back of a spoon (about 7 – 10 minutes). To finish, stir in the sesame oil.

Slap your patties on the grid, and baste them with sauce as you turn them. Once the patties are done to your liking, remove from the heat and let them rest for a few minutes. Assemble your burger, and dig in!

Comics books through the ages has taught us that every hero needs a sidekick, and The Peace Burger had the best one: Devil’s Peak Choc Shake.

The dark chocolate flavour complemented the Asian flavours extremely well, and the Sriracha spice was kept nicely under control without being overwhelmed. It’s a limited edition, so I suggest you go out and get some RIGHT NOW!