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Why bare cheeks are mandatory at the Weinheim town hall

Heiner Bernhard is Senior Mayor of Weinheim/Germany. The thoroughly tolerant guy insists on sending greetings for ‘fast-breaking’ to his puking citizen. Fast-breaking is an amusing tradition, by the way. First, you fill your belly, and then you stick your finger down your throat. Or something like that. It is a little silly but good for the figure.

Only recently, Heiner Bernhard no longer understands his ideal world. This is because girls with hijabs, or who are deeply veiled, are suddenly continually gathering in front of the Senior Mayor. Sometimes even thoroughbred Germans. Now, as is well known, Islam is as much a part of Germany as white sausage is of China, but the Senior Mayor of Weinheim only wants to see women with their cheeks bare.

He can’t tell anyone how to walk around on the street, but anyone who wants to get into the Weinheim City Hall must remove the headscarf: Bernhard just wants to know what gender he is facing.

However, it is forbidden for the confirmed Muslim girls to jump around the town hall without a headscarf. On the other hand, they have to go in to register or renew their ID. A Muslim woman in full hijab who wanted to apply for an identity card for her child was rejected because, according to Mayor Bernhard, a clear view of her bare cheeks is simply necessary for the “photo comparison.” The regulations are crystal clear and absolutely strict.

We do not understand why the mother’s bare cheeks are necessary for the child’s identity card, but whatever: we have developed a procedure that solves the problem one hundred percent in such cases.

Even if the Mayor insists, for safety reasons, that both the mother’s and the child’s cheeks are bare and can be seen from afar, people who are forbidden by God to show their cheeks to anyone can simply let their pants down and turn around. That way you will flash your butt cheeks, and even Heiner Bernhard should be satisfied…