72 Responses

Servers: Please vow to not sit at my table-I’m not there to have dinner with you. Do not kneel down like you’re praying to the Tipping Gods. Please don’t refer to a table of women as “guys”.
Chefs: Offer healthy choices when possible, especially since we will need extra support keeping our New Year’s eating resolutions.

To the servers out there: I will always respect you, say “please” and “thank you” and always tip well (you work hard and are often under-compensated). Please please please refill my water glass. Hydration is important. Thank you.

I second the “guys” thing, regardless of gender, and add “hon” to the list.

Also, please refrain from asking “Do you need change?”. I know you work hard (so do I to earn the money to eat at your restaurant), but that question labels you as lazy. In 2013 my response to that question will always be “yes”, and when the change is returned you run the very real risk that the tip will be reduced.

Please allow personal wines subject to a corkage fee and provided that you don’t stock the particular wine. I’m willing to accept those fair conditions for the ability to enjoy my cellared wine with your cuisine.

To servers and other customers service people handling cash: When giving change, please do not assume that I don’t want exact change and round up (down in one recent case) to the nearest dollar amount. Whether in the minority or not, I want my coin change. I like my coin change.

Please refrain from the ‘guys ‘ thing. It is rude.
I second the ‘do you need change’ question also. Yes, we will always need change,especially when your tip was reduced to 15% because you kept referring to us as ‘guys’.
If you are not going to write down the orders,please do not bring them to the table and place them in the middle and say,’there you go! Enjoy’
Earn your salary and tip,please.
In a small eatery, please do not congregate within sight of the customers and chat amongst yourselves or talk on your cells about your social life and sex. We are eating and trying to have our own conversations.
Lastly, for owners-please know your servers and train them so that we will continue to patronize your establishments.

Either gladly accept coupons or don’t accept them at all. No more making people with coupons order off a separate menu or feel like a second class citizen. If you aren’t going to be happy about having people in your restaurant using coupons then don’t offer them.

Chefs, please stop including the skins in the mashed potatoes. Enough already. Sometimes I find more peel than potato! It’s so 80’s and so over.

Good mashed potatoes should be so easy, yet most restaurants get it so wrong.

I want my veggies cooked. I don’t want to cut into broccoli and have it spin off my plate onto the floor. Or worse, have a dull knife and basically render the broccoli into nothing more than a place holder.

Please stop adding that ubiquitous seasoning to steamed veggies too. All it does is add a real off flavor and makes the side dish tiresome.

“Hon” is a relic from waitresses in diners in the 1950s (see “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore” and the TV adaptation)and was never intended to offend. I happen to like being referred to that way, especially in my advancing age.

This blog is full of tight sphincters and I’ll bet they all voted for “tight leash”!

Owners: If your not going to take reservations and it will be a 30-45 minute wait give the people waiting a comfortable place to wait.
If a party cannot have a comfortable place to wait without being in the way of servers then start taking reservations.
Servers: Always follow the description of a special with the price.
Customers: If you have been there a couple of hours and people are standing waiting for tables hit the road and finish the conversation in the car.

Dear owners and chefs: only the basics, across the board, no matter which venue you are: please have water on my table automatically, we haven’t had drought for some time, and though you might save a glass or the dishwasher’s time and energy, dining out is a luxury, even to the wealthy among us. If you serve bread, no excuses for substandard mealy little white forgettable pulp, invest in my first impression of you. Decent butter, no rancid oil. No shaky tables, and please don’t clear anyone before the last person is finished, unless asked. Just the easy, simple things that make a customer relax into his or her chair and cheer up because he or she has entered into your establishment.

Owners and Managers: Please train your waitstaff and reinforce with them that a hot food item is to be delivered immediately to the guests before engaging in a conversation with others while en route to the table.

Fine restaurants should have fine beer programs, sooo many are behind the times in the Cap Dist.

as for above, if these slights in service bother you, you should seek an establishment with a better quality of server, no? I feel that if a restaurant has poor service standards then they probably have many other poor traits as well.

When I was a server, and it was time to take a cash payment, I simply picked up the payment and said” I will be right back with your change”, if they wanted you to keep it, immediately they would almost jump at you and say no, that’s for you or keep the change, or I would go and get their exact change.

Chefs, it is o.k. with me to charge a high price for an entree, but PLEASE make it worth it!

To Owners: Please be consistent with your hours, within reason. I’ve stopped going to certain restaurants because too often they are closed when they are supposed to be open. And I’m not talking about showing up 10 minutes before closing. I mean restaurants who have hours posted on their website, on their doors etc yet never seem to be open during the stated hours.
To Customers: Please let your server know up front rather then once you are given your check that you will require separate checks. Many restaurants do not have the most up to date computerized systems. In that situation and for example, separating a check for a table of 8 into 8 separate checks takes time.

Owners:
-Please post your menus, with prices, on your websites.
-Please dont cram us in to tables so close together that it feels like we’re dining with the table next to us (yeah, Provence, Milano, and Beekman Street Bistro, I mean all of you)

Even as a wholesaler, we love our walkin public. Seven years ago this coming year, AIF had a retail spot down in Albany. The profit draw from wholesale was literally greater than 99% as opposed to walkin retail, so the retail spot was closed and we’ve gone wholesale and never looked back. For anyone who has ever been to our warehouse, you know that when you come during our hours (and even when you don’t), we will always spend time to help you, take you through a tour of our warehouse, and talk to you about products.

As much as we love people who come in for a chat, it truly does hurt us when people come in angry and sometimes refusing to buy from us because we no longer have a retail spot. This happens fairly regularly with our walkin public. We are always happy to accommodate, but we also must point out that if someone comes in and says, “Last time I bought from you, you had a retail spot! I’m outraged that I’m forced to shop in a ‘warehouse’!” then it was 7 years ago that you shopped with us anyway. We do not feel that a visit once every 7 years warrants this type of outrage.

If you do not want to spend time perusing our warehouse (it can get cold in the winter), please feel free to go onto our website at http://www.adventureinfood.com and peruse our product list. As we now do with many of our public who are regulars with us, call in your order and we will invoice, pull, package, and have your entire grocery list waiting for you upon arrival. How’s that for service?

Bar owners stopping shorting customers with “cheat glasses” that look like 16oz. but are more like 12-14oz. and charging extra. There are a long line of culprits in the region that use this practice and get the glasses from Stanley Paper Inc.

@18, I’m only mad at the fact that truffle oil is overused, hardly resembles the flavor of real truffles, and in most cases is a synthetic flavor concocted by a perfumist. Would you drizzle Polo Blue on your pasta?

My suggestion to owners is to get on Facebook and then post your specials, your soup of the day, etc. Oh – and I DESPISE banquette seating so much that I will choose restaurants WITHOUT banquettes over those with that awful seating configuration whenever I can. Like another commenter – I really have no interest in sharing my romantic special occasion with the strangers seated less than a foot away from me.

Servers – please don’t give me terrible service after I don’t order an alcoholic drink. I don’t drink but I do tip! And yes, PLEASE refill my water glass repeatedly and if that’s too much trouble, bring me a pitcher of water.

@32-Sara; STOP the servers dead in their tracks when they are clearing the table before the whole table is finished. Just stop them and tell them to not clear the table. You can bet your life that they will be so embarrassed they will not do it again.

What resolutions do you wish owners, chefs and servers would make — and keep — for 2013? – Owners and managers need to realize that they need a social media person on staff to create and maintain a heavy Facebook/Twitter presence for the restaurant. Whether it’s a tech-savvy server or a separate, dedicated position, if you’re not active on social media outlets, you’re losing.

What do you wish customers would faithfully resolve to do or not do next year? I wish they’d remember that even though the customer is always right, until you actually become a customer, keep your unwarranted negative remarks and comments to yourself.

Owners & Servers: Please let us finish our starters before you stand at the table with the entrees. This happened a few weeks ago at a great restaurant and by the time I ate the $30.00 entree, the only thing hot was me! I hate the push!

#33 theshakes, point taken, but it’s so damn good. I eat good things even if they’re not organic, perfect, preservative free, etc., and to your point, yes to real, black truffles, even white truffles, but – in a pinch, a duck egg basted in truffle oil with herbs or a mushroom pizza drizzled with truffle oil is still really, really delicious.

I agree with above, in a wide open restaurant, why must patrons be clustered together? Spread us out, please. Thanks!

I have another –
Servers, stop taking multiple glasses away from the table for refills, for example refills of iced tea. I’m a total germaphobe, and get grossed out completely thinking you’ll give me back someone else’s glass. Just bring the pitcher to the table, or better yet, provide a fresh new glass.

Customers: If you are paying with a Double Take, Groupon, etc – the tip is calculated before the discount!! Lately, I have seen alot of people tipping after the discount….and I take pride in my serving skills and have almost 20 years experience, and give 120% and smile when I am waiting tables before the wise remarks follow this….

Please, wait to be seated, and why, do you always have to head straight for the 1 table that has not been wiped down yet? WHY?!

Owners: When a party of 8 has reservations and requests a server, if they are unable to have that server, fine, but advise that server or someone else to at least acknowledge the table and not leave them sitting 10 mins without acknowledgement, especially when the table will prob end up spending $400….and 75% of the table are in the business and 25% regulars….very disconcerning, not the first time this has happened, it was my favorite restaurant, was…..Owners-know your employees…

I fully agree with theshakes – truffle oil is a chemical concoction unrelated to real truffles. Don’t use it! Also the Sysco comment- if it came from there, don’t serve it!

However, I would add that I feel very lucky in the Albany area because we are surrounded by excellent restaurants….Chez Mike’s; the Gingerman; DP’s and Yonos; so many others. Good service and good food – no complaints.

While everyone is complaining about “guys”, my husband and I were recently called “youse” at La Serre. Ugh.

I would like to see staff and owners treat all customers with respect and provide the same high level of service from one table to the next. Unfortunately, more than once this year, we’ve seen owners and servers fawn all over people who may be writing up their dining experience and barely paying attention to the terrible food and service they’re providing elsewhere. I don’t have an issue with owners and servers paying special attention to certain customers but it’s no excuse to treat the next table poorly.

Wow, quite a bit to take in here and fairly one sided. I suppose I’ll play devil’s advocate and provide the other perspective. I should say beforehand though, that I agree with calling tables “guys”, not automatically offering change, the cramming of tables (though to be fair your server probably hates that as well – they want the room to move just as much as you do), keeping drinks/waters filled, as well as the need to acknowledge your tables quickly even if you can’t get to them right away.

To customers:

1) If you are going out with 6 or more people, PLEASE call ahead – even if it’s only 10 minutes. Coming in and being upset/surprised there is a wait or no space is no ones fault but your own. Calling ahead will allow us to get a table prepared or you, or, let you know if one is not available. Also, on the same subject, never, ever, ever seat yourself.

2) Please stop arguing with servers over prices/coupons. We don’t control their rules. Read coupons before you bring them in. They have price minimums, expiration dates, numbers allowed per table (table being an important word, a separate check does not allow the use of another coupon), and usually lots of other information. Speaking of separate checks – if you want them please ask before ordering anything. If the server says they can’t do them, please respect that. It’s not being done out of spite. Old computer systems, lack of ticket space in the kitchen, or simply restaurant policy is often the reason.

Owners– please TRAIN your hostess/host on how to do their job. Thank the customer when they come in and when they leave- leaves a wonderful impression. Brad Rosenstein and family at Jack’s have had this down forever. The front of the house is very important to the overall experience. If you sell wine, train your servers how to pour it and ensure they have some knowledge about the list itself.

Servers– don’t clear the table until all are finished, know the prices of specials and how the dishes are prepared, and have at least some knowlege of the wine list– tips improve when you round out the customers experience.

If a restaurant really has an old computer system that makes splitting the check up at the end so difficult then why not offer it up front? When I was in Rochester for a reunion we dined at three separate locations as a group and at all three they cheerfully asked up front if we wanted them to split the checks or put it all on one. I have to say, it was a really nice gesture that would make me want to dine with a group at their restaurants more often.

willie: Haven’t you been tempted to walk over and listen in on a cellphone conversation at an adjacent restaurant table and make comments? It would take enormous chutzpah to do it but I’d bet it’s a sure fire cure for a very bad habit. 😉

Tempted, Mickey? Not so much in restaurants, but in other places I’ve actually DONE it. But the dolts don’t listen to me; they’re too wrapped up in their selfish semi-private conversations to notice. Or so it seems.

Most of the resolutions I’m about to suggest to restaurant owners and staff have been mentioned by previous commenters, but I hope you will forgive me if I repeat them. I’ll feel better after I do! Owners and managers: Please maintain your website so that the hours, menus, and prices are current. Front-end and dining room staff: “You guys” and “Do you need change?” have to go, and please introduce yourself to us. The spray bottle with cleaner should be banned during the hours the dining room is open. I shouldn’t have to say this, but even if one dining room is closing, vacuuming must wait until there are no diners left. I order soup with almost every restaurant meal, and the soup is served lukewarm more often than not. This occurs whether the soup is microwaved to serving temperature or it’s served from a heated vessel of some sort. The soup needs to be stirred before the temperature is tested, and “steam” floating from the surface does not mean that the bowl is hot. If hot soup is placed in a cold bowl, it will lose a significant amount of heat before it reaches the table. The rest of the resolutions pertain to the timing of the meal, the art of which seems to have been largely lost to servers. (Who remembers the serving professionals at Stone Ends in Glenmont?) It is important that all meals at the same table be synced and the time between courses paced, even if all diners are not being served the same courses. You’re losing potential business (including tips) if you don’t make certain that all diners have a wine/cocktail menu and offer soup or appetizers, dessert, coffee/tea, or after-dinner drinks to them. We usually will not order these if we’re being paced out-the-door. I don’t want to see my entrée if I still have soup or salad on the table. Confirm when we would like our wine served. We’re usually paying a premium for the bottle, and it spoils the moment if it shows up when we’re well into our entrée. The most grievous sin is removing courses prematurely. The goal is not to snatch away a plate, sometimes with food on it as soon as the server believes the diner “has stopped working on it”. (Yes, I’m in agreement with the previous commenters regarding that question.) The course should be cleared from all diners simultaneously, unless the server is asked to remove it sooner.

Owners : Please heat your dining room to a comfortable 70-72 degrees. Nothing will make me stay home and cook in my warm home faster than a chilly restaurant. This is so prevalent that people go out expecting it! They wear heavy sweaters or keep their coats on during service. Not only am I uncomfortable, but food gets cold quicker. If you want to save on your heating bills, you can do it without me as a customer.

Owners – many restaurants having no double door entry or other means od diverting the winter cold from blowing on diners each time the door is opened (sometimes many) – please conslider installing such a system. There are multiple restaurants I will avoid in the winter…that is lost business for you.

Owners: If you’re not personable, please hire a manager that is. You may have a great business mind and be an amazing owner but if your customers get hives when they see you coming, you should probably stay in the office.

Be on time for your reservation. When making a reservation, please give us as much information as possible. ie we have to go to the theatre; one guest is allergic to shellfish; etc

Don’t write your own menu by picking items from different entrees, and then complain/send it back when your flavor development doesn’t work. There’s a reason chefs put menus together.

If your food takes a long time, it’s because the kitchen is behind. Don’t take it out on your server via a poor gratuity.

PLEASE COMPLAIN! If something is not right, please tell us as soon as possible. Don’t remain silent and then wield your magical powers on OpenTable, TripAdvisor, Yelp! etc etc. We truly want you to have a great experience and come back. We will fix it right away. We truly don’t want to screw it up twice. Complaining on the internet only helps your ego. It doesn’t help your experience and it doesn’t help the restaurant.

Don’t be afraid to send back your food. People have seen Waiting! too many times. If you think that the kitchen would be capable of that, you shouldn’t be eating in that restaurant in the first place. If any self respecting cook saw another person do something to a guests’ food, they would not allow that in their kitchen.

Understand that meats are cooked to a certain temperature. Just because you call it medium rare at home, doesn’t mean that it actually is.

Don’t say that you’re allergic to something just because you don’t like it. We’re more than happy to remove it from the item, but to say you’re allergic to it is a lie.

Please realize that all restaurants are not designed to appeal to everyone. So many factors go into the design of the restaurant. if the music is too loud, it’s by design to make the place energetic and lively. If there are soft strings in the background, it’s by design to keep the sound level low and conversations quiet. For every person that complains that it’s too cold, there is someone who complains that it’s too hot. If you tend to get cold, put on a blazer, bring a shawl or an extra layer. If it’s a 100 seat restaurant, 50 people will think 70 degrees is too cold and 50 will think it’s too warm.

Same goes for table spacing. If it’s a casual restaurant, bistro, brasserie of cafe, the tables are meant to be closer together to encourage a more lively communal dining experience. If you are in a fine dining restaurant, the tables will be spread further apart to encourage more intimacy. Part of the price point that you pay for in a restaurant is for the “real estate”. If you’re paying $22 for a steak, you are paying for a small amount of real estate. If you are paying $47 for a steak, you should get a little more of it.

Dress appropriately. If you’re going out to eat with a place that tablecloths, take off your baseball hat and lose the Def Leppard T shirt, or at least put a sport coat on over it. Flip flops are not acceptable footwear in any restaurant unless there is sand within 100 yards of the front door. Understand that you are part of the ambiance of the restaurant. Please dress appropriately to your surroundings. New Year’s Eve is this week. Dress up for your dining partner, they’ll appreciate it.

GET OFF YOUR CELLPHONES If you go to a restaurant where you are served, it is plain common courtesy to the staff and your fellow guests to get off of the phone and have your attention focused on dining out. If you must take a call, excuse yourself to a secluded area, (ie outside, vestibule, lounge)

Advocate, I agree with just about everything you said and ESPECIALLY the thing about cell phones.

Seems like people in general have decided they’re not responsible for being courteous about cell phone use. The only thing worse are the cigarette smokers who drop butts at will, being the biggest and most obnoxious litterers there are in the world.

Events on websites. Keep them up to date and accurate. Most of the time, I choose where to eat based on what band is playing where.

Temperature. While I’m sure that people complain about it being too hot when others are complaining that it’s too cold, please err on the side of NOT freezing my toes off. Sweaters are nice and wool socks are great, but there is no substitute for an appropriately heated room.

‘Temperature. While I’m sure that people complain about it being too hot when others are complaining that it’s too cold, please err on the side of NOT freezing my toes off.’ – Stop wearing flip flops. ha

I am sure this is probably a generational issue, but if I am out with friends for nice dining(not burgers and a beer),we like to have a conversation. This is almost impossible in some restaurants because the music is blaring. I find this true in some of the newer “cafes” and wine bars. Sometime I would like to hear from owners as to their “philosophy” on type and volume of music in their establishment.