I've edited "What am I " to "What do I do ", this is not in response to Cec's reply but rather that "What am I " did not really have the meaning I was after.I realise that people will take it as the first line of a joke requiring a punch line but keep in mind that there is a riddle in there as well.

Still thinkingFrom your comments so far, I've concluded that "to speed" means to "drive fast" and because the word "up" doesn't refer to getting out of bed, etc. nor does it relate to improving one's well being to perform better then I can't see the meaning of the word "up" in this riddle/joke.?

Unless I'm mis-interpreting this riddle MCC is asking "What do I do" to "get a well known person up to speed" ? I'm having trouble trying to work out what "how do you get a well known person up to speed" really means before I can work out "What do I do"?

Cec wrote:Still thinkingFrom your comments so far, I've concluded that "to speed" means to "drive fast" and because the word "up" doesn't refer to getting out of bed, etc. nor does it relate to improving one's well being to perform better then I can't see the meaning of the word "up" in this riddle/joke.?

Re Cec's confusion, I initially was going to go with "How " but decided that this would only provoke you (the usual suspects) into providing punch-lines, so Cec, if you want to think "How " rather than "What do I do " then please do so, if you think it may help.