A New Year and time to start planning for the next stage, getting beyond being a nomad and perpetual couch surfer. This last year has taken me from the Pacific Northwest and British Columbia to California and Mexico, and across the Pacific to Tahiti, Australia and New Zealand. Campervan life is starting to look like a very good option for me.

Anyone looking at my life right now, from the outside, would think I have it made and that it is so exciting! I live in a cute house on the water; I have a great trip coming up; I pretty much do as I please, when I please! But from the inside it's a whole different view.

Gray haired lady has been lying dormant for a while but I thought it time to get the site back live. Granny Travels has been getting the attention but that is mostly a travel and promotional site. Gray haired lady is a more personal blog.

I looked at the date of my last post - a year ago. And a lot - and not much- going on.

When we were young parents, we thought we knew everything. How to breast feed, how to hold and burp the baby. And all the accoutrements - diapers that change color to show a pee/poop? Wow!

Add 30+ years and things have changed - or have they? Or are we just out of practice?

Yesterday, Granny Janet had one-month old Liam for a few hours and I found her resting on the couch at home, the little munchkin snoozing in her arms. But that didn't last long - soon the "hungry" cries were sounding and Mom Ellie was off having a 90-minute massage! "Susan, in the fridge

there's a bottle. Ellie said to heat it for a few minutes in hot water and then it will be good." None of the micro wave nonsense that releases all the nasties. So with Liam yelling his head off, I hustled and we got the pumped breast milk warm and soon he was

snoozing again.

It takes a village - or at least two grannies!

But oh my goodness, how we get out of practice! We used to do that without even thinking!

What a treat it was, and when grandpa Bill showed up, all thumbs, but proud as can be, showing off the first grandbaby, it is hard to describe. Impossible to describe is more like it. I can't wait to be down in SoCal to see my nine-month old Oliver in three weeks.

It is interesting, though. We make jokes about handing them back when they yell, and it's true. That frantic baby yelling doesn't affect me like it did when it came from my primary flesh and blood. Maybe grandparents should raise the little ones - think more logically and unemotionally! Nah... you have to have those heart-wrenching experiences to get to be older and wiser.

So youngsters, enjoy those sleepless nights - they are character builders, and one day, you too will be a grandparent.

I guess in all the turmoil, I forgot to mention that Susan was back in the mix after initially saying she couldn't go to Panama. So that was when we found houses we liked which fell through in the end. Then the day after was when she backed out again, as it is too expensive to take Cedar, the dog.
Just in case you were confused....

I last blogged in August last year and since then I have been so immersed in the business that it seems there just wasn't time. And I also didn't want to put what was actually going on in the biz out there in cyberworld!

But now things have changed.

Friends and family know I have been battling to keep mymixednuts going on a frayed shoestring. The shoestring finally broke, or more accurately, I gave up trying to keep it in one piece. It is a great idea, but the timing (recession) and the product (non-essential) combined, did not create a climate for success.

Annie has put a lot of money into the project; I put a lot of sweat and tears. I learned a huge amount about small business. And there are a couple of things that stand out: Pay yourself first and know your partners, and define responsibilities. Of course I know Ryan but the others... I only met Annie and Joe once. And then when we took on a marketing partner, a friend of Annie's, things definitely started going downhill. I only met him once as well. Just too many cooks...

But I was desperate for work and so when Ryan suggested that I do this thing, I jumped at the chance. He saved my bacon. And it is really sad to have to walk away from what I consider a creation of mine as I really had very little help. From a single url to the site it is now is a big accomplishment for me. It would, of course, be more of an accomplishment if it was profitable.

Oh well.

So now I am back in the job market, looking for something to keep me going. I interviewed yesterday for a position in Port Townsend at a boat yard that needs someone in the shop and to do other stuff like marketing etc. It would be fun I think, but there was a tall stack of applications on the desk so who knows whether I will get it. This is a depressed area so everyone is looking for work.

But I hold the vision of warm water, swimming and snorkeling every day and sun! Every day! Instead of this cold, snow, rain, ice and gray that we are surrounded with here.

The good news is my health is excellent, I live rent free, my kitties are wonderful. I actually feel a whole lot better since sending my resignation yesterday even though I am flat broke with no job! The stress of trying to keep the biz afloat would have killed me.

So now, anyone out there, I am available for anything legal (or not) to make some money.