Okay, so this happened last year, but it seemed worth talking about...

When it comes to labels and definitions of words like "nerd" and "geek," I've always identified most with the classical meaning of geek - a sideshow freak who bites the heads off live animals. In my case, they've generally been shrimp, and they've not put up a fight.

Now, restaurants make you aware of the risks to your digestion of eating raw seafood. What they don't do is warn you that your dinner could ejaculate into your mouth, with spermatophores that burrow into your skin. You might have a hard time arresting your dinner for beastiality, but the charge would not be inaccurate.

Check out the date of this story from last year, too: June 15th.

It's like this was the world's grossest marketing campaign for Prometheus.

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i don't see what the problem is here. don't all of your sea food dishes try to do the nasty with you? (or is that just me?) it's probably just me. anyway.... now we know what the squid was up to with hogwarts

Though I remember a friend telling me about this last year. Thankfully, as they say toward the end, sushi restaurants in the US are more through in cleaning out those sections of the squid. I'd wager even more modern styled ones in Japan do too. Mainly you want to avoid the more rustic and old fashioned restaurants that Andrew Zimmerman looks for on that Bizzare Foods show.

Though I do kinda wanna hit some of them in Japan, like that one where you have turtle soup and can eat its still beating heart.

Like they say in the article this mainly happens in the far east where people prefer their seafood not only raw but with all its internal organs intact. The Green Tea Diner in downtown here has been closed so many times for excessive numbers of parasites in the sushi that the health inspector's office agreed to a special waiver to allow just the sushi bar to be shut down - while the rest of the restaurant remains open.

I mean, a real-life woman being impregnated against her will by a tentacle creature?? So many jokes...and yet there's just so many, I keep drawing a blank. It's when the universe gives you the potential for everything that you suddenly think of nothing. And truly, this story about seafood rape was the universe's way of giving us unlimited potential. Alas, it looks like we're all just too pure to mock this majestic tale of takeout squid sperm...

@Kozmik_Pariah Well, it does somewhat depend on the tips TR gets...but don't worry, I sent off some tips for some classy stuff I found over the past couple of days. And by that I mean the TR definition of "classy", of course.

@SlyDante777@Kozmik_Pariah I do a round of the internets once a day looking for stuff to send LYT, don't always find anything worthwhile, so I can't blame him for pulling from the heap something a bit older.

@LYT @SlyDante777 rape? you people are coming down unduly hard on the squid - who got eaten - just so everyone is clear here, if you even try to eat me, getting "raped in the face" means you got off easy. Just saying.

Squids are smarter than dog or cat, they have the ability to use advanced tools (they just can't make them) and I don't eat anything as smart or smarter than a dog or cat.

@LYT@Gallen_Dugall@scarfdemon While they left the bears alone after that they continued their policy of eating at least one of every creature they came across, including bobcats, black bears and mountain lions. These were by no means "modern men"...

@scarfdemon@Gallen_Dugall So you subscribe to the "Lewis and Clark" method of first contact? First kill and eat any new species to determine if the new species is tasty, then document and catalog it's other attributes like intelligence.

While the Grizzly Bear did manage to throw them for a loop, this plan was by and large highly successful