Jon Corzine: Knucklehead of the Year

Aristide Economopoulos/The Star-LedgerAfter being subpoenaed by Congress, former New Jersey Gov. Jon Corzine testified in front of the U.S. House Agriculture Committee about the bankruptcy of MF Global, the financial company he oversaw.

New Jerseyans thought he was a financial wizard when they elected him governor. They were willing to overlook his sleepy demeanor, dated beard and even those grandpa-looking sweater vests, because, well, any guy who once had run Goldman Sachs certainly could balance the state’s checkbook.

But even with the (Wall) Street cred, Jon Corzine flopped, and voters traded him for Chris, the angry prosecutor.

When Corzine tried to regain the luster he’d lost, he took control of MF Global and threw up a Hail Mary – betting on the unpredictable European markets. The investments bombed, the company went belly-up and investigators discovered $1.2 billion was missing.

It’s the most money Corzine has misplaced that hasn’t ended up in Carla Katz’s bank account.
Corzine isn’t Knucklehead of the Year just because he stupidly bet on Europeans who get more vacation time than an Edison cop. No, it’s because he also blamed the collapse on his advisors. And because his firm might be guilty of co-mingling funds – a no-no.

And because, as governor, he railed against Wall Street irregularities and supported regulation, but then tried (unsuccessfully) to weasel a golden parachute from MF Global.

Corzine is the Supreme Knucklehead of 2012 because, along with all of that, he apparently was totally clueless. He told a Congressional panel, “I simply do not know where the money is” – which is the investment equivalent of “a dog ate my portfolio.” He added he was “in stunned disbelief.”

Those of us who have watched the fall can relate.

RUNNERS UP:

Elizabeth Board of Education president Marie Munn
What some people will do for free pizza. Investigators say Munn (and two others) deliberately misstated their household incomes so their kids would qualify for free or reduced-cost school lunches. All three were arrested. We hear jail food is even worse than school chow.

Paterson Mayor Jeffrey Jones
Jones knew what the job paid when he ran for office — $119,000. But the greedy mayor wanted more, so he tried to tap Tropical Storm Irene cleanup money for $6,000 in overtime. State officials slammed the cash drawer on his fingers and demanded he return the check.

Medford Mayor Chris Myers
If somebody posted an internet photo of you in tight, blue underwear and you were a mayor, you’d probably resign, too — especially if the person who posted the humiliating snapshot was a male escort who said you, a married father of two, offered $500 (and gifts) for sex in a California hotel.

Rep. Rodney Frelinghuysen
Apparently, one of the wealthiest guys on Capitol Hill doesn’t take the train much. Maybe that’s why, despite several serious mass-transit breakdowns, Rodney Rich tried to take a half-billion dollars targeted for New Jersey rail improvements and ship it to the Midwest for flood relief. Luckily, he failed.

Paterson teacher Jennifer O’Brien
Student? Criminal? She couldn’t tell the difference, so she announced to roughly 300 friends on Facebook that “I’m not a teacher — I’m a warden for future criminals.” Turns out, she was a candidate for unemployment. O’Brien was fired.

Union teacher Viki Knox
Another teacher, another Facebook screw-up. Knox identified herself as a Union High School instructor and posted anti-gay remarks such as “Why parade your unnatural immoral behaviors before the rest of us?” The self-proclaimed “Jesus freak” also wrote that homosexuality “breeds like cancer.” School officials are deciding whether she should be able to parade her ignorance around school anymore.

Bear No. 6131
No creature (with back hair) has asked for this many needles in the butt since Jose Canseco. But Bear No. 6131 was captured six times in 16 months. Each episode ended the same way: A Fish and Wildlife official pulled the trigger and Rover went nighty-night.

Rahway Mayor Rick Proctor
He tried to prove his love for his wife with a six-figure job as city health officer, but that led to an all-out political brawl: The town council passed nepotism rules, Proctor vetoed them, and the council slashed his salary from $65,000 to $20,808. He should’ve stuck with flowers.

Essex County Executive Joseph N. DiVincenzo Jr.
It’s been a rough year for Joe D. He was rammed in a car accident and, while riding his bike, ran into a park bench. (Maybe there was a double dip in the road.) But this was his biggest problem: While calling for pension reform and shaming public workers, DiVincenzo was outed collecting an annual $68,856 pension along with his $153,207 salary. It was all legal, thanks to a loophole, but hypocritical.

Republican State Senate candidate Phil Mitsch
Knucklehead. What else would you call a state Senate candidate who tweets: “Women, you can increase your odds of keeping your men by being faithful, a lady in the living room and a whore in the bedroom”?