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Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

The study says that "87% of gay men display levels of promiscuity that are parallel to those of unmarried straight men."

It appears that marriage has something to do with promiscuity. Which, in my opinion, negates the whole study because same-sex marriage has never been allowed until recently and now only a handful of states. (the date of this study is 2009)

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by para0402

I think it's mostly cause we put out more? :P

I agree with ADrock and actually I'm sure I said it (without a study to back it up) in a much earlier discussion about gay male "promiscuity"--- our "promiscuity" isn't out of line with single heterosexual men, and we're in a society where we can't marry and where breaking up with partners is easier and more common as a result. And where possibly more of us don't necessarily look to permanently settle down with one person because we can't marry anyway.

So I don't think there really is any such thing as 'gay' male promiscuity, just male promiscuity.

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by xbuzzerx

I agree with ADrock and actually I'm sure I said it (without a study to back it up) in a much earlier discussion about gay male "promiscuity"--- our "promiscuity" isn't out of line with single heterosexual men, and we're in a society where we can't marry and where breaking up with partners is easier and more common as a result. And where possibly more of us don't necessarily look to permanently settle down with one person because we can't marry anyway.

So I don't think there really is any such thing as 'gay' male promiscuity, just male promiscuity.

We also don't have to spend all that time, energy, and $$ attempting to "wine and dine" to get laid either, which I'm sure slows down the process a lot more then just going, "Wanna fuck? [_] YES [_] NO Check one box, please".

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

I think it's about promiscuity, not male promiscuity. All of us, male or female, can notice sexual potential with more than one person. "Promiscuity" has a connotation that this potential for attraction is being mismanaged.

Which it is, when it overrules loyalty to the person or people close to you. Or for that 13% of gay men who are hyper sexual in their number of partners, opening up a disease vector. Or when recreational sex becomes such a time commitment that it prevents other kinds of human attributes.

I don't think a return to Victorian prudery is the answer. But questioning the behaviour of the 13% seems reasonable.

Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

That's only because women are the sexual restraint for men. Put two men who are into each other together, and sex happens. Put groups of gay men together who are into each other and some filthy, dirty, freaky shit is going to happen. Men are biologically wired to breed and breed often. Women keep straight men from going overboard. It has nothing to do with heterosexuality or homosexuality. The answer is, and always will be, men.

That's only because women are the sexual restraint for men. Put two men who are into each other together, and sex happens. Put groups of gay men together who are into each other and some filthy, dirty, freaky shit is going to happen. Men are biologically wired to breed and breed often. Women keep straight men from going overboard. It has nothing to do with heterosexuality or homosexuality. The answer is, and always will be, men.

This. Sex is awesome ^_^

That we are capable only of being what we are, remains our unforgivable sin.
- Gene Wolfe

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by Just_Believe18

That's only because women are the sexual restraint for men. Put two men who are into each other together, and sex happens. Put groups of gay men together who are into each other and some filthy, dirty, freaky shit is going to happen. Men are biologically wired to breed and breed often. Women keep straight men from going overboard. It has nothing to do with heterosexuality or homosexuality. The answer is, and always will be, men.

Not really. It overlooks the fact that men have autonomous self control that does not require a woman to activate. And that men also value things like loyalty and intimacy. And that self-control, selectivity, loyalty and intimacy do not get in the way of a mind-blowing ly good sex life for a lot of men.

There may be other ways to accomplish those things that don't always require monogamy. But I reject the idea that monogamy is a female thing and promiscuity is a male thing. It has not much to do with having a good sex life or not.

Finally, self-control and self-discipline have always been considered to be demonstrations of masculinity.

Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by bankside

Not really. It overlooks the fact that men have autonomous self control that does not require a woman to activate. And that men also value things like loyalty and intimacy. And that self-control, selectivity, loyalty and intimacy do not get in the way of a mind-blowing ly good sex life for a lot of men.

There may be other ways to accomplish those things that don't always require monogamy. But I reject the idea that monogamy is a female thing and promiscuity is a male thing. It has not much to do with having a good sex life or not.

Finally, self-control and self-discipline have always been considered to be demonstrations of masculinity.

Sexuality and our biological impulses are really complex things, but as a general statement, I don't really know anyone who rejects the notion that the "instinctive" tendency of men is to have sex often, and our natural inclination (in question of degrees) is to notice and crave many different partners.

Of course social, cultural, moral, religious and traditional forces have acted upon that in shaping 'male sexual behavior', and of course we have some provider/protector/loyalist natural tendencies as well. But I do think that if men en masse acted outside of social influences in their upbringing, only the minority would be exclusively dedicated to one partner for life for sex.

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by para0402

I think it's mostly cause we put out more? :P

pretty much. any gay guy can get sex when he wants to. don't care who you are. there's hookup sites and the whole nine. it may not be who you want to fuck but at the end of the day, guys are not as picky as females are when it comes sex. straight dudes on the other hand have it bad.

one thing about the closet/you don't have to hurry/it will be bad tomorrow/so brother, don't you worry

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by xbuzzerx

Sexuality and our biological impulses are really complex things, but as a general statement, I don't really know anyone who rejects the notion that the "instinctive" tendency of men is to have sex often, and our natural inclination (in question of degrees) is to notice and crave many different partners.

Of course social, cultural, moral, religious and traditional forces have acted upon that in shaping 'male sexual behavior', and of course we have some provider/protector/loyalist natural tendencies as well. But I do think that if men en masse acted outside of social influences in their upbringing, only the minority would be exclusively dedicated to one partner for life for sex.

Except that's also true of women. They like sex. Their behaviour is modified by all the same factors that modify men's behaviours.

And the overlap in both the inclinations and behaviours is so extensive that it seems meaningless to treat men and women as categorically different. I just don't buy it when people say "men are this way" and "women are that way."

If we were talking about geography, it's like Germany and the United Kingdom. To say that the UK is north of Germany might seem true at first. The UK certainly extends farther north to the Shetland Islands. And Germany reaches farther south in Bavaria. However the people of Berlin and Hamburg live north of London - north of most British people in other words. Cologne is basically level with it. And the sprawl of Frankfurt is level with Cornwall in the UK.

To say "the UK is north of Germany" is such an oversimplification as to be almost useless in many contexts.

I think the parallel holds for discussions of what men are "supposed to be like" versus what women are "supposed to be like." It's basically impossible to extract a meaningful difference from the tangle of individual behaviour to actually sort people into categories. Beyond physical stuff like "men have bigger penises than women," there is so much overlap its mostly just a self-perpetuating social convention to pretend we are recognisably different in our sexual needs or capacities. Much like other self-perpetuating social conventions (slavery, racism, etc.) it too will slowly go away.

Last edited by bankside; February 14th, 2013 at 10:08 AM.

Americans need to keep their guns so they can protect themselves from gun violence just like Nancy Lanza did. And like Chris Kyle did. And like Gabby Giffords did. And like Tom Clements did. And like Michael Piemonte. And Joseph Wilcox.

Re: Gay Men Are Slightly More Promiscuous Than Straight Men

Originally Posted by bankside

Except that's also true of women. They like sex. Their behaviour is modified by all the same factors that modify men's behaviours.

And the overlap in both the inclinations and behaviours is so extensive that it seems meaningless to treat men and women as categorically different. I just don't buy it when people say "men are this way" and "women are that way."

If we were talking about geography, it's like Germany and the United Kingdom. To say that the UK is north of Germany might seem true at first. The UK certainly extends farther north to the Shetland Islands. And Germany reaches farther south in Bavaria. However the people of Berlin and Hamburg live north of London - north of most British people in other words. Cologne is basically level with it. And the sprawl of Frankfurt is level with Cornwall in the UK.

To say "the UK is north of Germany" is such an oversimplification as to be almost useless in many contexts.

I think the parallel holds for discussions of what men are "supposed to be like" versus what women are "supposed to be like." It's basically impossible to extract a meaningful difference from the tangle of individual behaviour to actually sort people into categories. Beyond physical stuff like "men have bigger penises than women," there is so much overlap its mostly just a self-perpetuating social convention to pretend we are recognisably different in our sexual needs or capacities. Much like other self-perpetuating social conventions (slavery, racism, etc.) it too will slowly go away.

Bankside I'm not necessarily saying you're wrong-- but every single thing you're saying conflicts with every study I've ever read about how the various genders select for sexual partners and their tendencies in terms of quantity of partners. Even the psychological frame of mind in which they approach sex and how men can much more easily than women disengage from it emotionally and regard it as a physical act, whereas for the great majority of women that's a formula for not enjoying it and not being able to climax.

Are there some studies that back up this view that men and women operate exactly the same way in terms of their natural sexual urges?