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Review:

likeness_of_a_seabird says:Reviewing first four chapters here at the same time because I'm too lazy to type :)

I really like this. All four founders have very defined personalities and they have their unique voices which really come across to the reader.

The story is a bit slow-paced but not everything needs to be action-packed adventures. I think the slow pace suits this type of story. Telling each chapter from the viewpoint of a different founder works; this way, the reader becomes familiar with all of them and gets inside their heads better.

I like that you've made their backgrounds different. I can totally see Ravenclaw being a high-born lady while Hufflepuff comes from more modest origins. The origins of Gryffindor and Slytherin are not so clearly defined but it doesn't bother me in the least. The mention to their origins could have been added to the story, but leaving it out does not make the reader lose anything important.

The only thing I'm having a bit of trouble is Slytherin. Unfortunately, I find his character, at least in these early chapters, a bit unbelievable, particularly concerning his relationship with Maeve. While it is certainly possible that he could fall in love with a Muggle, the ending of their relationship seemed a bit abrupt. I would have personally liked to see some hints of her mistrust towards magic and magic users growing and how she has been told it is supposedly connected to devil, even if Slytherin himself would not be able to see those hints. You could have perhaps expanded that conversation Maeve had with Slytherin about how she would be surrounded by magic and be unable to use it herself.

However, all in all I'm really enjoying this story. I love history and historical fiction and although it might not be completely historically accurate, I'm willing to turn a blind eye on them, since they do not disrupt the flow of the story. Keep on the good work!

Author's Response: Hi there! Ahh what a lovely surprise! Thank you, I'm really glad the personalities of the characters are so effective and unique and that the POV works, that is wonderful to hear :) You're right, I wanted to get inside each of their heads and show the events as each of them sees it.

Slytherin's origins are mentioned briefly in that he has prior, unpleasant history with Muggles, but year otherwise he and Gryffindor aren't really explained. I may put that in a later chapter, thanks for the suggestion :)

Slytherin's split with Maeve was supposed to seem abrupt. Because it's from his point of view and it's something he never saw coming, their relationship was meant to seem too perfect, how it was through the eyes of someone blinded by love. At least that's what I was going for. As for the magic connection to the devil, in those days magic/witchcraft were frowned upon and considered untrustworthy, and people were very religious back then (though this was before the days of witch burnings - that was a couple hundred years later) And now, at the risk of sounding like Professor Binns, I will move on! :p The next chapter is from Slytherin's POV which will get into his mind a lot more.

Thank you SO much for this wonderful review, and I'm thrilled that you are enjoying the story!! ♥