I don't have a problem with the disclaimer that the fabric might be different. I purchased a laptop sleeve from an online seller who made a point of putting a disclaimer that she used vintage fabrics and therefore couldn't make any guarantees as to which fabrics would be available at any given time. I emailed her with my order and mentioned a particular fabric I had really liked- it was a bunch of colorful kokeshi dolls - and asked whether there was any possibility that she might still have more of that fabric. She was out, but let me know about an even better pattern - kokeshi dolls with cat heads - which she had only just received. I felt like my experience was more personalized because I got a fabric based on my preferences that I might not have even known about otherwise because it was a recent arrival.

Exactly. We don't sell through the website, the website is just to give you an idea of what's available. I get paid to do quarterly updates four times a year.

In that case, as I said, I'd find information about fabric lines the shop carried much more useful than being shown fabrics that might or might not be at the store if I went there. Or even, just a plain page giving the store's location and hours. I'd be willing to go and check out a nearby store at least once, without knowing anything more than that they were a quilt shop.

Once upon a time I didn't know what paisley was. A few people IRL tried to explain it to me, but I couldn't visualize it no matter who described it or how. Until I finally saw a paisley print fabric that was identified as such, I had no idea what people were talking about. I've heard of batiks, but I don't know what that means. So, just having general, "stock" photos of different styles/prints would be helpful for me.Also, unless I know that there is stuff I would like to see, I don't have the luxury of popping by and checking out a nearby store. Any time I go out, I've got 3 little kids in tow. So, for me, I would actually rather see some prints that give a good idea of what may be available. If it's just a plain page with location and hours, I'm much less likely to ever stop in. But that's just me, and I know that my circumstances are far from universal.

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In the United States today, there is a pervasive tendency to treat children as adults, and adults as children. The options of children are thus steadily expanded, while those of adults are progressively constricted. The result is unruly children and childish adults. ~Thomas Szasz

I work as tier two technical support. This means I often get upset or angry customers who have impossible requests. A common impossible request is for a repair method we don't have. Now, I've worked supporting these items for nearly 2 and a half years, as a tier two for about 9 months, and in all that time, the repair methods have not changed. The prices have slightly, but the methods themselves have stayed basically the same.

Not only are these the only methods we have, there is literally no one who can do anything different for any of these methods. I explain this to customers.

Customers are not special snowflakes for asking for different methods. They become special snowflakes when they threaten to sue our company because they don't like our repair options, which are the ones stated in the warranty. They are special snowflakes when they personally attack me for these policies.

Most of my customers are awesome, but the few that aren't could fill a book of special snowflakes. I'd have more stories, but most of them would give away who I work for.

Once upon a time I didn't know what paisley was. A few people IRL tried to explain it to me, but I couldn't visualize it no matter who described it or how. Until I finally saw a paisley print fabric that was identified as such, I had no idea what people were talking about.

OT: A few years ago, if you typed 'paisley' into Google, the first or second site that came up was a very serious website explaining how the paisley design was one of the symbols of the Devil, and why anyone who used it or wore paisley fabric was putting themselves at risk of eternal damnation. It seems to have vanished now, unfortunately - I used to go and look at it occasionally just for a giggle.

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When you look into the photocopier, the photocopier also looks into you

I work in food service. Thus far most of the things people have asked for have been technically possible, just really difficult. The exception to the rules however have been some of the best SS scenarios ever.

-We offer cheddar sun chips, but not plain sun chips. A customer asked if we could wipe the cheddar off. Seriously.

-Someone wanted a whole muffaletta (which is a giant sandwich the size of a dinner plate), but instead of bread, they wanted it wrapped in lettuce. Ok...maybe this can be done...but they asked if we could cut it in to pinwheels so they could serve it as party food. So physically impossible.

-A woman asked if the staff could go around the room and ask other customers to stop eating and sing happy birthday to her mother. We had to decline because that's incredibly weird.

-Someone wanted a whole muffaletta (which is a giant sandwich the size of a dinner plate), but instead of bread, they wanted it wrapped in lettuce. Ok...maybe this can be done...but they asked if we could cut it in to pinwheels so they could serve it as party food. So physically impossible.

I dunno, lay out some lettuce, layer it with meats and olive salad, roll, stab with millions of toothpicks and slice. Probably a bit messy, but if you used a minimal amount of olive salad it might work.

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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. -Mark Twain

-Someone wanted a whole muffaletta (which is a giant sandwich the size of a dinner plate), but instead of bread, they wanted it wrapped in lettuce. Ok...maybe this can be done...but they asked if we could cut it in to pinwheels so they could serve it as party food. So physically impossible.

I dunno, lay out some lettuce, layer it with meats and olive salad, roll, stab with millions of toothpicks and slice. Probably a bit messy, but if you used a minimal amount of olive salad it might work.

I don't know about YOUR lettuce, but I've never seen lettuce that would wrap around something dinner plate sized.... I've seen lettuce leaves that could do a burger bun thing, top and bottom, but not wrap around. Do you live in Alaska and grow those gigantic veggies I used to see pictures of?!

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Newly widowed, fairly cranky, prone to crying at the drop of a hat. Newly a MIL; not yet a Grandma. Keeper of chickens and dispenser of eggs! Owner of Lard Butt Noelle, kitteh extraordinaire!

I work in a quilt shop, and I frequently get customers looking for a particular fabric they purchased from us months or even years ago. There is a core of fabrics we call 'blenders' because, well, that's what they do - they fit with many fabric lines and help pull your quilt together. They tend to stick around for a long time. But the cute fabric with purple and green dinosaurs or kitties playing pool - 4 to 6 months tops at our store. Sometimes it is no longer available for reorder, sometimes we just need to make room for newer and fresher fabrics, and the older lines wind up reduced on the flatfold table. So if you love chevrons or black and lime green, buy it while it is in style, because it may not be so easy to find when it isn't.

-Someone wanted a whole muffaletta (which is a giant sandwich the size of a dinner plate), but instead of bread, they wanted it wrapped in lettuce. Ok...maybe this can be done...but they asked if we could cut it in to pinwheels so they could serve it as party food. So physically impossible.

I dunno, lay out some lettuce, layer it with meats and olive salad, roll, stab with millions of toothpicks and slice. Probably a bit messy, but if you used a minimal amount of olive salad it might work.

I don't know about YOUR lettuce, but I've never seen lettuce that would wrap around something dinner plate sized.... I've seen lettuce leaves that could do a burger bun thing, top and bottom, but not wrap around. Do you live in Alaska and grow those gigantic veggies I used to see pictures of?!

Lay down several overlapping leaves. If you roll them in the right direction, they'll stay together.

I am overhearing a Harry Potter situation from someone sitting near me:

Customer needs a technician to fix his internet lines onsite and has an open ticket. The recent note mentions the tech is not allowed on site at the moment due to a recent fire that was put out in his building. I am not sure what part of "we cannot override the fire marshal and emergency services are not letting anyone inside the building" at this time. At least my co-worker is offering to make the update to the ticket and escalate it even if the tech is not allowed yet into the building to fix the issue.

Not a patron request but similar to the last story - My sister had a similar conversation with the Landlady of the house she lived in as a student. The kitchen had a gas cooker, and my sister and her housemates turned off the gas and called the emergency gas line after an incident involving a sheet of flame shooting out from the back of the hob when they tried to light one of the rings. (as the size of the flame made them think that there must be a leak, for there to be that much gas around when the cooker had not been turned on)

The gasman who came out apparently turned white as a sheet after inspecting the cooker. He then physically disconnected it from the gas supply, wrapped it round with tape marked 'condemned' and advised them both verbally and in writing that the cooker was extremely unsafe, and under no circumstances should it be reconnected to the mains, or used in any way, unless it was first repaired by a qualified gas engineer and re-inspected. He also told them that he did not think it was likely to be worth trying to repair it, due to its age and the extent of the faults.

When they were able to get hold of the landlady her response was to tell them to "use the other three rings". After having been told that the entire appliance had been disconnected and condemned) She went as far as to suggest that my sister and her housemates should reconnect it so they could use the other three rings.. Even after they explained that that would be illegal.

In the end, I think it was about 2 weeks before she finally agreed to replace the cooker.

I am overhearing a Harry Potter situation from someone sitting near me:

Customer needs a technician to fix his internet lines onsite and has an open ticket. The recent note mentions the tech is not allowed on site at the moment due to a recent fire that was put out in his building. I am not sure what part of "we cannot override the fire marshal and emergency services are not letting anyone inside the building" at this time. At least my co-worker is offering to make the update to the ticket and escalate it even if the tech is not allowed yet into the building to fix the issue.

Did something get left out here? I'm not seeing the impossible request, just that a customer needs an on-site technician once the fire marshal allows re-entry of the building. Your co-worker should be updating the ticket and noting the request as part of their job.

I am overhearing a Harry Potter situation from someone sitting near me:

Customer needs a technician to fix his internet lines onsite and has an open ticket. The recent note mentions the tech is not allowed on site at the moment due to a recent fire that was put out in his building. I am not sure what part of "we cannot override the fire marshal and emergency services are not letting anyone inside the building" at this time. At least my co-worker is offering to make the update to the ticket and escalate it even if the tech is not allowed yet into the building to fix the issue.

Did something get left out here? I'm not seeing the impossible request, just that a customer needs an on-site technician once the fire marshal allows re-entry of the building. Your co-worker should be updating the ticket and noting the request as part of their job.

It sounds like the customer was trying to insist the technician go in NOW NOW NOW, fire marshal or no fire marshal.