Frank McNulty and why government needs to abolish marriage and civil unions

As part of our Shabbat dinner lecture series each year we invite a politician to come and speak. This year we invited Colorado House Speaker Frank McNulty and I am delighted that he is coming to speak at our event this coming Friday night (June 8 — feel free to join sign up at www.jitf.org[1]).

Many people assumed I invited Mr. McNulty to speak at our dinner event because of his recent involvement in not allowing the civil unions issue to come to the House floor for a vote. In fact, I invited Frank McNulty to come and speak in July 2011 — so it had nothing at all to do with that vote. However, this does give me an opportunity to discuss the issue of civil unions.

In a 2006 column I opined that it is unjust for governments to deny same-sex couples living in a committed relationship the same legal rights as married couples. I stand by this view. However, it needs to be put into the context of a larger philosophical view. As a Jew, and thus a religious minority in this great country, I am very sensitive to government telling anyone what they should or should not do in matters of religion or values.

In my view marriage is a religious concept. That’s why Christians call it “holy matrimony” and my religion calls marriage “kiddushin” which come from the word “kadosh,” which means holy. Holiness is a matter for religions and houses of worship — it is certainly not the matter for a state that offers First Amendment rights to its citizens.

It is therefore my view that government should get out of the marriage business altogether. Government should not be issuing marriage licenses or telling people who they should be having long-term romantic relationships with. Why is it governments’ business to tell its citizens which types of partners they can marry or how many they can have at any given time?

At best government can help a couple with their legal agreements that constitute the civil aspects of their partnership – those that have to do with taxes, joint ownership of property, inheritance, child custody etc. But people should not have to be sleeping together to be able to enter into such an agreement. Indeed, good friends, brothers and sisters, etc. should also be allowed to enter into such agreements if they should so wish.

Marriage, on the other hand, should be something you go to your priest, minister or rabbi to do. If secular people wanted to get married they could concoct their own type of ceremony if they wanted, but it should have nothing to do with the government.

In sum, therefore, I am in favor of the abolition of government-backed marriage and, instead, the establishment of a civil union that any two or three or more people can enter into, if they should so wish, and they do not have to have a romantic connection to do so.

If people want marriage, however, they would have to find a private ceremony for that. I dare say many churches and synagogues would not offer such a ceremony to gays or to polygamists and as private institutions that would be their right. Government, on the other hand, should have no such power.