at least when it's "a lengthy, 'good,' 'deep,' 'passionate,' 'intimate,' 'romantic,' and 'memorable' french kiss in the bed of the defendant after an overnight stay, and the kiss achieved emotional arousal and was followed by professions of true love and repeated encounters involving the same conduct." So says the Kansas Court of Appeals, though without word on what you're allowed to do if there's no overnight stay, or if it was followed by professions of something other than true love.

This case involved a female high school teacher and her 16-year-old student; in Kansas, the age of consent is generally 16, but there's a special rule for teacher-student relationships when the student is 16 or 17. However, the same would apply to two 15-year-olds French kissing, which is also a felony; it's a lower-grade felony than full-on statutory rape, but it's a crime nonetheless. Presumably in states where the age of consent is 18, two 17-year-olds could be similarly punished, at least if the statute uses similar terms ("lewd fondling or touching").

(That's Public Displays of Affection, for those worried about their Palm Pilots.)

In Colorado, Connecticut, Illinois, and Nebraska, public "lewd fondling" is a crime akin to public nudity. Under the Kansas decision I note below, would public French kissing by two consenting adults qualify? Or would it only be considered "lewd touching" (the rubric under which the Kansas court categorized French kissing) rather than "lewd fondling"?

Remember, "public kissing is a public nuisance." (The only person I can credit for this is Carrie DuShey, though I don't know if she's the author.)

Under Massachusetts law, possessing pictures of minors engaging in (among other things) "lewd fondling, touching, or caressing" is a felony. Under the Kansas Court of Appeals' reasoning, that would presumably include pictures of minors French-kissing, at least if the French kissing is seen as emotional enough. What videos would it be a felony to possess in Massachusetts, if the Kansas court's interpretation of "lewd touching" were adopted?

UPDATE: PowerBlogs' techmaster Chris Lansdown writes:

Forget movies -- what family pictures of teenage [here, 17-or-under -EV] children with their girlfriends, or teenage husband/wife kissing after their marriage (some people do so less modestly, I understand)?