I let my yard guy bring his family over to use my pool. It was summer, so the kids werenít in school, but he insisted that Saturday was the only day they could come. Saturday is a bad day for me because I have to be at work very early on Sunday. I finally agreed on Saturday if they left by 6 p.m. They showed up at 5:30.

Yard guy arrived with a bunch of guys (no women), including four young children, two very rowdy teenaged nephews, and assorted relatives and friends. They proceeded to have a raucous party that didnít include me. I was so distressed by the teenagersí behavior that I went into my house and stayed there, hoping my neighbors wouldnít call the police.

They did not bring their own insect repellant, sunscreen, towels, food or drinks, other than beer for the adults. I offered what I had. The kids went through all my soft drinks and a case of bottled water. I put out chips and trail mix, which the kids didnít touch. When they were leaving, the kids asked for a plastic bag (I assumed for wet swim suits) and dumped every bit of the food into the bag to take home with them.

When they finally left, there was a huge mess, and I had to stay up past my bedtime to clean it up. I was fatigued and crabby the rest of the week.

Every year since, Yard Guy hints about bringing his family over, and I completely ignore him.

This year, Yard Guy is babysitting his toddler grandson part time, and he brought the grandson with him for me to watch while he worked. I put a fast stop to that.

Logged

It takes two people to play tug of war. If you don't want to play, don't pick up the rope.

I let my yard guy bring his family over to use my pool. It was summer, so the kids werenít in school, but he insisted that Saturday was the only day they could come. Saturday is a bad day for me because I have to be at work very early on Sunday. I finally agreed on Saturday if they left by 6 p.m. They showed up at 5:30.

Yard guy arrived with a bunch of guys (no women), including four young children, two very rowdy teenaged nephews, and assorted relatives and friends. They proceeded to have a raucous party that didnít include me. I was so distressed by the teenagersí behavior that I went into my house and stayed there, hoping my neighbors wouldnít call the police.

They did not bring their own insect repellant, sunscreen, towels, food or drinks, other than beer for the adults. I offered what I had. The kids went through all my soft drinks and a case of bottled water. I put out chips and trail mix, which the kids didnít touch. When they were leaving, the kids asked for a plastic bag (I assumed for wet swim suits) and dumped every bit of the food into the bag to take home with them.

When they finally left, there was a huge mess, and I had to stay up past my bedtime to clean it up. I was fatigued and crabby the rest of the week.

Every year since, Yard Guy hints about bringing his family over, and I completely ignore him.

This year, Yard Guy is babysitting his toddler grandson part time, and he brought the grandson with him for me to watch while he worked. I put a fast stop to that.

I assume he's a really good yard guy for you to keep him on after those shenanigans.

I think I probably would have reminded him when he arrived at 5:30 that we had agreed use of the pool would end at 6:00 so obviously, since that would only give him half an hour, it wasn't going to work out today and we'd have to plan for another time. When the subject came up again, if I were still inclined to allow him to use my pool, I'd have let him know that I only expected him and his children, period. Of course, I know that's moot now, since you have gone with the wise "No way in e-hell ever again" option.

(snip) The best part? They left alcohol bottles and partially filled cups on the table where my niece could get to them. She's 3 and most likely would have tried to drink out of the cups since they looked like they had juice in them. (snip)

I would have a talk with your sister about that - that could be construed as child endangerment. What if niece had woken up and gotten to the cups before you were able to remove them? (I'm assuming that you had to clean up the mess because sister was sleeping it off.)

Is sister and niece living with you or are you living with them? If the former, I would demand payment for the lamp and tell sister her sorority sisters are no longer welcome (they have a chapter house, let them party there). If the latter, put your stuff in storage until you move out, which would be sooner rather than later.

I'm Gs live-in nanny until my sister graduates this December, but when this happened I worked a regular job. I told L then that she couldn't have people over acting like that again and we haven't had a problem since. She usually isn't that irresponsible so I'm hoping that either she won't have those girls over or that I'll have enough advance notice next time to take G home to visit the grandparents. I wasn't too worried about the lamp since it was a thrift store find, but I've made it clear since if her people break anything they're paying for it. Thankfully I got to the drinks before G got up. I know I would have been blamed if she had gotten into them

This is slightly different, because my family was the guests in this case. When I was 12, my parents and I visited my grandparents in London (my dad's parents). I asked for and received permission to go for a walk after dinner. I soon got hopelessly lost and wandered around for what seemed like hours until my dad found me. He took me back to my grandparents' house, and that was that ...

... Not as far as my grandmother was concerned, however. She asked my parents what they were going to do to me to punish me for scaring everyone like that. Mum pointed out that I was shaking and crying, not to mention the fact that I hadn't gotten lost on purpose. Nana's response: "You should beat the hell out of her to make sure she never does anything like that again." She was scandalized and disbelieving when Mum said quietly "We don't hit our daughter."

Dad had always had a strained relationship with his mother; that gave a hint as to why. He confessed many years later that she was always free with her fists, even when he was tiny.

One summer when I was a kid, one of our relatives came to live with us for a few weeks to get away from her abusive soon-to-be ex-husband. It's been so long ago now (and I was just a kid and not privy to "big people talk") that I'm not entirely certain of how it came about for her to stay with us. I'm not sure if she came to my parents for help and they offered her a safe haven or if she just informed them that she was coming to stay. Knowing this relative, either could have happened.

And she was bringing her dependent son with her too. While I was at an age where I would be okay with someone just around within earshot if I needed them, the son needed supervision pretty much all the time, even though he was quite a bit older than me (developmental issues). So that fell to my parents and me when Relative was at work. Dad worked night shift full time and Mom worked part time at the local store. Plus having to watch Relative's son while Relative was at work. Anything of mine that the son saw that he liked became his. Didn't matter what it was or that it had been a gift to me. It became his. I don't want to go into a lot of detail, but I'll just say that this wasn't a little kid who didn't know any better. This was someone who should have been given boundaries early on but it had never happened because of his "condition." I'd try to hide my things, but he'd find them, digging through drawers and closets to see what he could find. My mother let this behavior slide for a bit, until he started stealing my school supplies that we'd set aside for me. My parents didn't make a lot of money, and they just couldn't allow the things they'd bought me for school to be taken away like that. Mom confronted the son, read him the riot act about what he'd done, he tearfully apologized to me (I really don't think he had a clue that it was wrong to take things from me), and I got my stuff back.

Also, Relative took it upon herself to "police" my chores. One of my chores was to make sure that the dishes were washed, dried and put away; I often wiped while my mom washed. Mom didn't have a problem with how I did it, as I did it how she'd taught me. Relative, however, did have a problem and announced that she was going to start "inspection" on my chores and make me do over anything that wasn't up to her standards. I don't remember that I actually said anything to her, but I do know that I gave her a look that said, "Oh, yeah? You and what army?" I did say something to my mom about it, and she spoke with Relative and let her know that it wasn't her place to monitor my chores.

The straw that broke the camel's back - and got these people out of our home - was when my dad found out that the soon-to-be-ex-H was stalking Relative. There were some tools and bundles of fencing material that Relative had given us that suddenly disappeared one night while Dad was at work. And then, a day or two after that, Dad and I were outside and saw the man drive past our house (over 40 miles from where the guy lived) really slowly, checking things out. When the man saw my dad, he sped up and drove on. Mom and Dad had a talk with Relative soon after that and made it clear that our family - Dad, Mom, and me - came first and that they would not allow anyone to live there if it made our home unsafe and we definitely felt unsafe if someone was coming onto the property in dark of night and taking our stuff.

I think Relative and her son did maybe spend a few random nights with us after that, but never anything long-term, and well after the ex-H had passed away and was no longer a threat.

Whew...finished reading all of these! My jaw has been scraping the floor for over an hour now.

For my story..I gritted my teeth every other Christmas knowing I would be hosting my step sister, her husband and their eventual child, but as they live 8 hours away and only came every other year I just dealt with it...until I finally had had enough(Sorry..Long)First time - This was the first time I had spent any time with my BIL and it took about 5 minutes to realize I really did not like him. He is a loud mouth know it all, but for the sake of harmony I kept my mouth shut (trust me, that is no easy feat for me!). He kept following me into my kitchen (that was very small) and telling me how to make things. Ummmm..my holiday meals were always very well received so I didn't need help and he was in my way. Step mom finally told him to sit down and leave me alone. Now, I like when people eat, I cook a lot of food and even with my parents, my step brother and these 2, my DD and myself there should have been left overs..I say should have. I have never seen 2 people load up on food like these 2 did. I have oversize plates I use for these meals and these plates were literally overflowing! Not only did they each have 3-4 helpings of everything (while we all sat wide eyes) but they drank 2 gallons of milk! Then complained when things ran out! I have never had anything run out! When they left I realized they drank all the milk without telling me leaving my then 2 yr old with no milk!Second time- Different place, slightly larger but I still hated anyone in my kitchen when I am doing things but he was my shadow. Again, ate like it was the first and last meal they would ever have, but thankfully my dad gave me the idea to not put all the food out so we would have some left overs for both myself and parents to take home. Hid extra milk too. Step sis had just had their son and was BF'ing..no problem other than she decides to feed him at meal time in front of all of us with absolutely no cover. Glad she was ok with it..my father and her brother were not. I gently hinted that she could use my room but she said no, she was fine and continued shoveling food in her mouth while we were all staring at the turkey carcass. Third time - Their son was now 3 and they let him do whatever he wanted. He got upstairs and went under my sink and got the windex out and was spraying it everywhere. My DD, who was 9 found him. She brought him back down (I was getting the buffet set up) and told his parents what he did but said she didn't believe he had ingested any. I was then treated to a 20 minute lecture about why I should have baby proofed my home. I finally said "I don't have a baby, they do and should have been watching him." He told me "Your DD should be watching him, we are guests". By this time, between him putting on a football game on TV loudly and the kid running and screaming constantly, my poor dad had developed an eye twitch and I wanted them to just leave. Again, ate like barbarians, loaded their sons plate up and he just threw it all over my floors (they didn't clean it up or attempt to stop him, my step mom did).Straw that broke the camels back - The year my little one was 1, they were coming again, having not been for a the last year due to weather. My dad calls me about 3 pm Christmas Eve to give me the heads up that I am going to get a phone call asking me to change the time of the meal because they had to be back to work the day after Christmas but still wanted to have dinner (remember, they live 8 hours away). I told my dad they can ask but dinner was 5 pm like it was every single blessed year. So an hour later step BIL calls and says "I need to ask a big favor, We have to work the 26th and it is a long drive back but we want a Christmas meal, so can you make it earlier?" I bit, just to see what he would ask (dad didn't specify the time they were asking for) and he said "Noon". Pardon? You want me to have a turkey, a ham, and the various sides all done at noon because you twits can't plan to come down when you have time off? (This part was said in my head!). I just said that that would be impossible as the morning is spent with my kids opening gifts and having breakfast, that I would have to start cooking at about 6 am and myself and SO were up late anyways getting the gifts under the tree and doing some of the food prep. He then whined (not attractive) "what are we supposed to do? How will our son have a holiday meal? You have to change this!" I calmly told him no, wasn't going to do it. He hung up, I called my dad and him, my step mom, my SO and I shared a good laugh. My poor step brother, who they were staying with apologized to me for their rudeness. They ended up coming over unannounced on Christmas Eve, where the son repeatedly harassed my SO's dog(we put up a baby gate to keep the dog from mauling this kid) and were treated to why my step BIL is the smartest man in the whole.wide.world. because he knows EVERYTHING! Finally, I looked at my watch and said, goodness, if we are going to be there, we have to leave now. Thankfully, my SO and older DD played along with this lie, they left and we drove around looking at Christmas lights just to get out of the house! They have never been back and I told my parents I would never host them again.

This happened to my husband's cousin, who is something like a younger brother to me (when he left home, I taught him how to shop for groceries, how to cook, how to do laundry, etc.)

He had an interstate friend over for a week and was very much looking forward to it. He hadn't seen this guy since early high school. Unfortunately, it seems that his "friend" hadn't matured since then. If anything, he'd regressed. He was a total idiot.

The first night, cousin was awoken by his "friend" emptying a 2L container of milk all over him and his bed. "Friend" though this was hilarious, and wouldn't understand why cousin was upset at being woken up rudely and having to wash not only his bedclothes, but also the surrounding carpet and wipe the entire bedframe and walls so they didn't stink of off-milk in a day or two.

Cousin began to lock his door whenever possible and rapidly child-proofed his apartment. Anything which was easily flammable or expensive was hidden away under lock and key. But it turns out "child-proofing" is much easier than "idiot-proofing", because idiots are more able than children at organising alcohol-fueled parties without telling the host of said party beforehand. Idiot adults are also more adept at breaking large things than children.

Initially Cousin was upset that "friend" wasn't the person he fondly remembered him as from school, but this feeling was quickly replaced by loathing and finally the much-desired "thankdeityhesgone" feeling.

I guess I have to thank my lucky starts I donít have any stories that come close to the egregious behavior displayed by the rude guests in the stories in this thread.

I did have one guest though whose behavior took me by surprise.

We have a group of friends that we play cards with on a monthly basis. We alternate the house we go to every month, and this particular month it was my wife and I turn to host. One couple that came was Ted and Alice. Alice is a charming sweet lady. Refined, well educated, and a pleasure to be around. Ted was always a bit strange. He is the brother of the wife of one of the other couples that were in the group. The other couple was Bob and Carol. Bob had made some comments at times concerning his BIL Ted that led me to believe he wasnít a big fan.

This particular night, things were starting to wind down, I was standing talking with some of the other people in the group. Alice was not playing, we had an odd number of players and she was happy to sit and chat between games (we also socialized over dinner and then later dessert), and she had a book she could read while people were playing. She was sitting in one of my recliners and had actually dozed off.

That was fine, my recliners are very comfortable and she wasnít the first person to fall prey to its soothing charm. Ted was still playing, his partner was actually his brother who was visiting from out of town and joined us for the evening. The other two players were Bob and Carol, so it was a table comprised of family.

Bob and Tedís brother were talking, I donít know what they were saying, but Ted took offense. He stood up, started swearing, saying he didnít have to listen to this @#$%, plus a few other choice phrases. He looked over to Alice and said ďCome on, weíre leavingĒ. Alice had no idea what was going on, she had been dozing, Ted swore some more, again told his wife to get up, and before he even gave her a chance to respond, he stormed out the door, got in the car and left.Bob and Carol ended up giving Alice a ride home, which was forty miles out of their way so they werenít too happy with Ted.

The aftermath is that this was the straw that broke the back for Alice. Somehow in the fallout to all of this she found out that Ted had a girlfriend, he had been spending a lot of money on her (Ted had been out of work for a long time and had only recently started working, so in essence Alice had been paying for all the gifts to Tedís GF)She has filed for divorce, and needless to say I donít have to worry about ever hosting Ted at my house again.

I asked Bob what the conversation had been at the table that got Ted all worked out, and he was pretty much baffled about what set him off. But according to him, this was just another in a long line of events of strange things that would set Ted off on some rampage over perceived insults.

Our never coming back guest is my BIL. He is in our town once a month for work and once in a while would come and stay the night. He's got a chip on his shoulder about not being loved by the family (adopted) so we'd get him in the food he liked and basically try to be hospitable. Well, we were obviously too hospitable because over time he went from being a greatful house guest to complaining if the hospitality wasn't up to our "normal" standard. He also stopped visiting with us and would just play on the PC.

His last visit we'd just been in a serious accident and were both recuperating and not up to visitors but he begged and we gave in. He was meant to stay for one night but ended up there for two... in no particular order he:

- complained because I ate his chips (yes the ones I paid for that I had been saving as a treat)- asked me to lend him a hundred for petrol - asked me to go to the store and buy him smokes- hit on the victim support counsellor (around because of the accident)- asked me (while recuperating) to wash his car because I was off work and he was tired

All of those had become fairly typical and we were pretty good at laying boundaries and didn't feel they were egregious enough issues over which to turf family out.

However, he made a mistake when he went out to get his smokes (the ones I wouldn't buy him) and didn't log out of the dating site he had been on. When I went on to check email I found a series of messages where he was arranging a one night rendezvous with a stranger in our house after we had gone to bed. So I checked web history - and found all the interesting material he had been browsing while being holed up in our study.

In my home? I don't think so.

The rest of the family think I am a complete monster but anyone who would abuse my hospitality in that way is NEVER welcome back.

My best friend for a while at university got the cut direct and never got invited again in one fell swoop. Let's call here Antje, 'cause that was her name.I'd changed courses and made some new friends, and she got incredibly jealous. I was really clueless about that kind of thing (someone jealous? of ME having friends? never! I'm not worth it!), and just invited her to come along to a party at my school. We met up at the place of one of my new female friends who'd promised to do my make-up. Cue the first attack of jealousy. She wanted to have her make-up done, too. New friend suggests thinning out her eyebrows a bit. Tweezer barely touched her and she BELLOWED in pain, much like a small child will exaggerate the tiny bump against the table after you've told them off for something, to demonstrate that they are really the wronged party here.Well, we went to the party and after ended up at said new friends place again. Antje got hungry. Friend said, well, you can make yourself a cheese sandwich. Off she went to the fridge. When she came back, she'd put all the cheese in the sandwich - the entire packet of sliced cheese. New friend (who was also just a poor student, plus this was late on Saturday and shops did not open on Sunday) lost it a bit and said, how much cheese did you put in there?!

Antje's reply? 'As much cheese as I needed to make it a nice sandwich for me, I'm hungry after all!'

Yeah, no.

I rang her the next day, and the first thing she said to me was 'I know what you are thinking, but I'm not jealous.'

I said, 'Sure, but in that case you have even less of an excuse for behaving like a spoilt brat all evening. I was embarrassed to have taken you.'

And that was pretty much that. I think the fact that I'm a fairly motherly creature with my friends misguided her into thinking that all the things I did for her on a regular basis were her due and she owned me. Nu-uh. Looking back, she was one of those people who never reciprocated and acted really put out when you asked them for a favour. More fool me for having stuck with her that long. I really did not miss her, which surprised me a bit.

heyyoume's story reminds me of a babysitter we used to have. She wasn't a very good babysitter (she barely interacted with our kids), but she was all we could get one evening. We came home unexpectedly early and found her downstairs in our study. That was already a bit weird (the kids were asleep upstairs; why was she in the study, as opposed to, say, the livingroom)? After she'd left, we found that she'd installed MSN Messenger on our computer (strike 1 - do NOT touch our computer, and strike 2, do NOT install software without asking us first). Not only that, but because we'd gotten home before she'd expected us, she hadn't had a chance to close down her chat window, and we found that she was talking to a boy about - well, let's just say the same act that made Monica Lewinsky famous. Strike 3.

I found a series of messages where he was arranging a one night rendezvous with a stranger in our house after we had gone to bed.

Amazing Infuriating. Unbelievable. Cut direct worthy--forever.

Oh this reminded me of not my guest, but a friends. Several years back, was my 25th HS reunion. And someone I had been pretty good friends with in HS, who happens to live literally around the corner from me, was going, (susan) and would be staying at another friend's house (we live about 45 mins from where we went to school).(Jane)

All was well and good, except Susan, shall we say, "hooked up" with another classmate, Peter, and invited Peter back with her to Jane's house, where she was staying!!! Jane said she didn't know Peter, hadn't known him in school (I did, as we sat next to each other in homeroom sr. year), and was quite upset with Susan for not only inviting a stranger back to HER home, but she's pretty sure there was some scrabble being played as well! Jane also told us she slept with her purse next to her in her room!

since reconnecting with Jane at said reunion, I have been to several casual getogethers at her house, and even stayed overnight at one. In her daughter's room. I don't know if that's where Susan and Peter were, but blech. Jane did say they stripped the bed, but ewww. who does that?

Jane is one of the most gracious hostesses I know, but I think this took it bit to far. And between that, and several other smaller "issues" I don't know that Jane adn Susan are really that close anymore.