‘If You Want a Free Moose …’

It died yesterday, apparently of natural causes. I called Fish & Game to come and get it. Apparently, moose are a natural resource and belong to everybody, until they die, then they belong to whoever’s property they die on. So, according to Fish & Game, the moose now belongs to me. Sweet!!

So, if you want a free moose, please come and get it before the bears do. You could use it for dog food, or stuff it and put it your front yard, bear bait, whatever. If you live in the lower 48, this might be your best opportunity to get a free Alaska moose. I don’t really care, I just want it out of my yard. Read more …

You’ll all be happy to know, funeral arrangements for the moose were made by a small squirrel in a flight helmet. He said his friend became despondent after learning his big celebrity crush, Bambi, was a dude.(Hokey smoke, Rock, who ever heard of a dude called Bambi?)

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