Former home of Ranting and Raving, Charlotte-based writer Regan White has taken a turn as a recovering journalist. Continue to follow the antics, anecdotes, sarcasm and sentimentalism here.

October 15, 2010

Coffee, columns and strange weirdos

It seems as if the past few weeks have been an unending stretch of gathering information like berries in a basket. One here, one there, a few spill out here, a few are full of fungus over there. Today was an important day in sorting the information out, putting it on paper, hitting deadlines. Sometimes it's painful. Like today. It's slowly coming together, though I have miles to go before I sleep. (Kate, I owe you a call. Sorry I missed yours tonight. Way too behind. Promise to call tomorrow or Saturday.)

Amid the hubbub of work that's due, so was my online application to Good Morning America's Advice Guru call for candidates. My favorite Starbucks barista, Janie you're the bomb!, grabbed me in early October after hearing GMA announce the contest and said, "You HAVE to apply, Regan." I went to the website right away. I copied down all the application questions. They sat on my desktop and fermented. True to form, an hour before it was due at midnight I started banging out my replies. It might've just been the end-of-time endorphins but I think my responses were pretty damn good. I'm quite pleased. Uploaded my photo, filled out my info, sent that shit in with 10 minutes to spare.

Now, does GMA pay attention to one of the last of thousands to apply before the floodgates closed? I don't know. Is it better to be first or last? Are we talking about the Kingdom of God or a job application? Either way, it's probably best to squeak in at all. I'll take it. And now I can get my latte without shame as the baristas have been hounding me about if I had submitted my application yet.

My sweet dog Korben is lying beside me. His allergies have been awful and after not being able to breathe a stiff course of steroids has left him overly aggravated and hungry all the time. He's like a tiny Maltese version of Napoleon right now. I never met Napoleon exactly, but I have a pretty clear image in mind. If he were a Maltese in a bandanna, he'd be my dog. I'm touched that he's sacked out next to me, softly snoring. While Leeloo shows her love for me by still trailing me like a puppy and sidling next to me every chance she gets, Korben is far more fickle. But it's in moments like these that I know he prefers me. Or at least my bed and ceiling fan. I don't blame the little guy.

And in hypocritical news, when my due stories are in and sent I will be purchasing a sexy Halloween costume this very day. I know, I know. When did I ever think I'd type those words, right? Especially without them being coupled with the words "Rainbow Brite." Peer pressure. It's a horrible thing. It's another item to add to the turning 30 bucket list: Resolve to wear sexy costumes while you're still relatively sexy enough to pull it off. Now to narrow it down to the essence of sexy Wonderland Red Queen of Hearts - who hasn't been sexy in any iteration in literature or silver screen. Somehow these costume companies have thought otherwise, however, and have rendered her in thigh high, bow-draped stockings, heart-festooned corsets and glitter platform Mary Janes. They know my weaknesses it seems.

Regarding pressure, love and the whole business of living, I've been listening to the song below today and find it rather poignant. Well put, Loudon. Well put.

Song of the day: Loudon Wainwright III's "Strange Weirdos"

"Isn't it strange that two strangersSuddenly don't feel so strange?It's something familiar though this time it's differentWhat they're in for feels like sea change

Isn't it weird that two weirdosCan wind up not feeling that weird?It's all so momentous yet perfectly normalScary but not to be feared

And it starts with a sentence that might last a lifetimeOr it all might just go down in flamesIf I let you know me then why would you want me?But each day I don't is a shame

And each day I don't is a great shame

Isn't it great that two peopleTogether can tear down one wall?The handwriting is on it, it's not hieroglyphicThat barrier just has to fall

But isn't it sad that most peopleStay so lonely it's almost a crime?We might be strange weirdos but it can't be normalTo be frightened so much of our time

And it starts with a sentence that might last a lifetimeOr it all might just go down in flamesIf I let you know me then why would you want me?But each day I don't is a shame

Comments

Awww, Snarky Dan. You're so sweet.
As you well know, I'm quite the open book. I let most everyone know me. A veritable whore of sociability, that's me. I've felt close lately with someone who holds back from me, as the case has it. And it's a shame. At least from my perspective. It's a great shame.
Hope you're well - one weirdo to another. ;)

Times in life require pumpkin spice and sweet potato soup. From a creep to a weirdo, not the case at all. You are not a weirdo. Some people may not be comfortable with your level of intelligence. Men in general, not all men, but most have a problem being around a woman that they feel may be smarter or more verse than they are. You are very diverse- nerdy, funny, cute. If the person cant realize that you are a total package, then maybe this person may not be worthy..