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Sunday, November 7, 2010

Living That Scare!!!

"Mommy!!!" I shouted my throat out till the time my Mom reached my room. Its not that I live in some 4 floor big house but still it took her whole five minutes to travel in our 3 BHK flat..

"What the hell on the earth is wrong with you that made to shout like this at past 3 midnight?? What is the matter?" She was really annoyed as I disturbed her deep nap. I couldn't believe my Dad was still snoring like nothing happened.

I really felt very bad for her. She must be very tired after all household chores she has been doing all day. But I couldn't help as I got really scared.

"I felt it. I felt it so close. I felt like it was on me. Walking or I don't know what. But its was there." My voice was trembling when I said.

"What are you talking about beta?? Who??" She asked while scanning my room, each corner. She was really confused what I was talking about.

Me, poor thing. No one can understand what I was going through.

"That thing, that thing mom which I was telling you all in the morning". I uttered.

"Nothing Beta, you better go to sleep. Its nothing. See, there is absolutely nothing". She said and left the room.

I sat on my bed looking all around. Where it must be? How come no one can see it but me. I felt like crying. I was tortured like never before now.

It left all its signs everywhere like my book shelf, my cupboard, my study, almost everywhere. I saw it. I felt it all around. I feel it's the existence near me then why no one else does.

This wasn't the first time. I was feeling it from last so many days. I saw it. I lived it. It goes all over me nights leaving me in a fear I live whole night. I feel a fear when I switch my light off while going to bed in night. I get scared while opening my drawer for taking my things out. I had already emptied my cupboard from the fear that what if someday I open it and that comes straight on me and kept all my clothes in my Huge Suitcase which I had back in Hostel. I couldn't help it.

One day I came back home after having such a long day at work to see my whole room like a mess. Actually My Mom spied about "What-that-thing-would-be-which-scares-me..". I needed a bed but ended up on sofa.

This was it. I thought of getting rid of it anyhow. I need to be brave enough to live this scare now. I need to live freely.

And end of it was really amazing. I was going through the e-TOI while having a coffee and there it was looking into my eyes. I saw it again but couldn't hold my gaze for longer.