sorry to disappoint

You know the girl that says YES to everything because they want to save the world with yes?

That’s me. Well, was me because I am learning that saying yes a million times only leaves me feeling like a failure with nothing left to give, and it leaves others in disappointment.

I hate disappointing people.

But I learned something very important a year or so ago that just now clicked, when you say yes to one thing you are saying no to something else.

Is it your family? Friends?

To be completely honest, I find myself saying NO to my family more than I should. It’s easier to ask them for forgiveness when I disappoint them than to disappoint the other person. It’s horrible but it’s how I have lived my life.

what I wrote makes me cringe!

I guess that’s why I am here. Living my life out loud. It helps me to process and want change in areas I have neglected.

Emery came along and I felt like I was ALWAYS saying no to people, because I was. I was saying no to everything because I just wanted to be home with my kids, and the thought of taking two kids anywhere gave me an anxiety attack. Thinking about it now gives me anxiety.

I can tell you that the NO’s became easier and something started happening. The more I said it the more freedom I felt. I didn’t care about disappointing anyone anymore {I still say YES way too much but I’m a work in progress}

The season of NO is here. It’s given me more time with my husband, my kids and myself. It’s made me uncomfortable but it’s grown me. It’s allowed me to take a step back and focus on what’s in front of me. What’s important.