Mystical Chinese monkey predicts Donald Trump will be the next US president

While most economists, retired generals, newspapers, former presidents and American voters don’t think that Donald Trump should be president, at least he has the backing of China’s magical monkey king.Last Thursday, Geda, aka the “king of prophets,” chose Trump as the winner of Tuesday’s election by rejecting the banana nearest Hillary Clinton and instead choosing the one on Trump’s podium, sealing the deal by giving the Donald’s life-sized cutout a big smooch on the lips, AFP reports.The prophetic primate from Shiyan Lake Ecological Tourism Park in Hunan has a documented history of his banana-eating predictions coming true. In July, he picked Portugal to win the 2016 European football championships in the very same way.While Trump has an infamous love-hate relationship with the polls — believing that they are rigged when he is losing and not rigged when he is not — it’s unclear how he feels about being Geda’s chosen candidate.Trump doesn’t only have the support of mystical Chinese monkeys, but Chinese toilet paper and mask manufacturers as well. While scientific polls of Chinese people and Chinese Americans aren’t going his way, veteran China watchers believe that the top leadership in Beijing is rooting for the Republican presidential candidate.“It was Mao Zedong who said: ‘Without destruction there can be no construction’. And, if I interpret him correctly, Donald Trump is the suicide bomber of American politics,” Orville Schell, the head of the Center on US-China Relations at New York’s Asia Society, told The Guardian.“He wants to just bring the whole house down and start over. And I think there is an element [of that] that is quite tantalizing to China.”Still, Beijing shouldn’t get too greedy, this tumultuous election has already been a godsend for Chinese propaganda, allowing state news media to freely attack both candidates and trash the American political system in general.