Yea, i feel bad because i know some people are like late 30s or 40s and thinking that too. I'm secretly hoping i die some kind of heroic and painless death by where my then family can sue and make enough money to be happy

Marriage is a joke in America. If you have any wealth (get a prenup, but even that might not protect it all). I do not plan to marry. My uncles and aunts almost all are divorced, plan to divorce, been used for huge amounts of $ (close to the millions).