I am bi racial so yeah I can definitely relate. My situation is a little different from most though since I dont have a white parent. Both of my parents are half black and half white. I am aware of both sides of my myself but at the same time it is impossible to identify as a white woman. Especially since my parents are both darker skinned and really dont look mixed. Yes it is annoying that people are always concerned with why you are lighter or darker skinned. We have the one drop rule in America so unfortunately most people are going to just call your children black and not respect both sides of their culture. My mother raised me by herself and people would refer to us as black even though we are bi racial and I am clearly bi racial. You just get used to it.

Your children will know who they are regardless of what people try to box them in as. It sounds like you are sensitive to BOTH sides equally which is really great and will make it easy for them to speak up for themselves when they encounter those situations. I think about that stuff too since my sons dad is white and my son will most likely look white. I want him to know he is still mixed no matter what people think or try to tell them. Your shade of brown does not determine who you are even though thats what people think. Ever since I got pregnant some friends and family members think they have to make it a point to tell me since I got pregnant by a white man my baby is going to be white. It is starting to aggravate me and they do get corrected. He is mixed. No matter what color his skin color turns out to be he is still one quarter african american. I dont want people making him think he cant identify with that part of him. It is his culture too.

I think I just need to be reminded sometimes of things that have been put into place like the one drop rule.Eventhough someones race is indentified incorrectly it doesn't change the fact that they are biracial or whatever they are. Great comments whitneyp06.

I have a 7 yr old bi-racial daughter and haven't had this issue. Her birth certificate only shows my race and her dad's race. My daughter was fair as a new born up to age 3, but we live in the south and she can keep a tan for a long time. Now when my daughter was younger, I use to hear comments like, "is she your child?" If I had a dollar for every time I heard that ... My ex-hubby (now) use to hear it too but not as much because at the time she looked so much like him, I think he gave birth to her. So, it was a little heart-breaking when people automatically new she was his child, but only assumed that I was her mother.

I only have 1 child, so there's no comparison to be made in sibling skin tone. People will always be curious about skin color, regardless if the child is bi-racial or comes from 2 black parents. If you think about it, it's not unusual for a black family to have 1 child that is darker than the other. However, all I can advise you to do is make sure your daughter's birth certificate accurately shows her as bi-racial or multi-racial.

Lastly, I've always taught my daughter from the time she was 2 yrs old that she was bi-racial. She's not black or white, but both. I've told her that it's ok to be different and not to let other tell you who to be and what to be. So far so good. My daughter is a smarty pants, so if you ask about her race she'll tell you the human race and then that she's bi-racial. Her father and I always agreed that neither race should be loss because of what other's thought. We aren't into making others feel good, but rather our child can feel good about herself and her identity. If you choose this route, start telling them this while there young. My daughter is in the 2nd grade now,and she will tell you who she is with no problem. She doesn't identify with either race but as bi-racial or rather multi-racial. At school she is identified as multi-racial.

Don't make their color an issue but make it normal. When my daughter was young she thought for a long time that all kids had a white parent and a brown parent. It was abnormal for to see two parents of the same race although she saw them all the time. I try to find dolls and Barbies that looked like her as much as possible. I bought a doll house and bought a white daddy and black mommy so it was a representation of her family.

Wait until school...they make you choose only one race! My DD is black/white so I decided that we would pick the race that she looks most like which is white because she looks more white than black. My husband is white and I am a very light-skinned black woman. America needs to overhaul the system and make a box for "Multiracial" and that would cover all racially mixed kids.

Here's a quick anecdote for you..........Years ago when I gave birth to my DD, the office manager at my workplace (who was also a part-time boss of mine) heard from my boss that I had just given birth and the first thing she said was "Is she DARK?" Not is she healthy, or how much does she weigh, etc.......

My son is 11 months old. His father is Black and I am as white as they come. Since day one everyone has told me that my son looks asian, and he isnot very dark. They even say, "well his dad is so dark, why is your son so light?" I get questioned all the time about his skin color." In public nobody ever assumes he is mine. "I am to white to have a darker baby." I have these comments coming at me all the time. In just 11 short months I have learned to deal with peoples ignorance and move on. My son is biracial. Neither all white nor all black, so his skin color is going to reflect that. YOur not alone :-)

My DD is black/white so I decided that we would pick the race that she looks most like which is white because she looks more white than black. My husband is white and I am a very light-skinned black woman

Doesn't it concern you that your child will grow up checking off the white box only to have society tell her she is Black? I feel sorry for her because it seems as if she will have to swim against history, people, the complete structure of our society and yes even the little race box.

Yes race is what you are perceived to be...but when her "light-skin" Black mother walks in behind her it's going to be nothing but confusion. I guess I don't understand how you think she is white when she has a Black mother...I know the one drop rule plays a huge roll as to why I think this way. Kinda reminds me of Imitation of Life

My DD is 1/4 white and I will let her know she is Black first and mixed second, my reason being is that she can relate to the Black culture better, I can't imagine her fitting in that well in Norway.

I am a biracial female. My mother is white, my father is black....and like PPs mentioned, the "one drop rule" is definitely true and a standard that society has created. Although I relate easier to my black side, I always know I am also white.

To keep a long story short, if I am surrounded by a group of white people, I DEFINITEYL stand out...therefore I do not fit in. If I am surrounded by a group of black people, I still stand out, but only as one of the "lighter skinned" people and not as a misfit (KWIM?).

My white mother raised me, and I have a FULL white sister and my mother's husband is white. I still managed to turn out "black" but with a strong understanding of WHO I am and my culture.

Long story short, SOCIETY DOES have a huge roll in subjecting a biracial person to "choose" (for lack of a better word) a race, and quite frankly as much as you try, society will have more impact that you on your child in the long run.

I am white and my husband is black. our daughter is 22 month's and is around both sides of our family. we go to a mostly black church and my husband side of the family are all black, then every day we are at my mother's house who are all white. the nice thing is she is around both side's of the family often, because they all live in our town. My hope is that she get a lot of exposure to both sides of her family and can pull the good out of being a mix that made her into the beautiful girl that is her. I am sure most stranger's will think of her as black only because of her brown skin, what I think matter's most is that she know's who she is and I hope she wont be bothered by the people she dose not know.yes society want's to make people into a type, but if you know who you are then let the world think what they want.I am white but I am also indian but to look at me you wouldn't think that I was not part indian but I am. I know who I am and if the world think's I am white so be it. GOD BLESS

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Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, She became a butterfly.