Answered by Father Edward McNamara,
professor of liturgy at the Regina Apostolorum university.

Q: I was asked the following question: A woman explained that her son
was Catholic, though not a practicing one, who married a Jewish girl and
they never had their baby baptized. This woman dearly wanted the child
baptized. One day, after Mass, on the way out she stopped at the holy
water fount, took some holy water and sprinkled it over the baby's head
saying "I baptize you in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit."
She wanted to know if that was all right to do and sufficient for the
child's baptism.
—
C.C., Fall River, Massachusetts

A: The question must be answered on two levels: If baptizing the child
was the right thing to do; if the woman's actions constituted a valid
baptism.

The first question is rather delicate because although the grandmother
deeply desired the child's baptism, the education of children usually
falls upon the parents who are called to be the primary educators of
children.

Canon law (Canon 868) also requires that for an infant to be baptized
licitly:

"1. the parents or at least one of them or the person who legitimately
takes their place must consent.

"2. there must be a founded hope that the infant will be brought up in
the Catholic Religion; if such hope is altogether lacking, the baptism
is to be delayed according to the prescripts of particular law after the
parents have been advised about the reason."

At the same time the canon specifies that "An infant of Catholic parents
or even of non-Catholic parents is baptized licitly in danger of death
even against the will of the parents."

Even though there are clear historical examples of grandmothers who
secretly baptized children under atheistic Communist regimes, this does
not appear to be the present case. The baptism should not have been done
without the parents' consent.

Also, only the priest and deacons are ordinary ministers of the
sacrament of baptism and can perform all of the rites. In some extreme
conditions where there are no ordained ministers available, lay people
have been authorized to perform the essential rites.

An unauthorized lay person should not perform a baptism except in cases
of imminent danger of death or other dire situations where not even an
authorized lay minister is available.

With respect to the second question regarding the validity of the
baptism. As we have seen, the grandmother, no matter how sincere her
motives, acted against Church law and should not be imitated. From the
description of what she did, however, it would appear to have been a
valid baptism and the child is truly baptized. All the same, in order to
be certain, it would be necessary for her to give a detailed description
of what she did to a priest in case she committed an error regarding
matter or form that would cast doubt on the baptism's validity.

What to do? It depends on many factors, but sooner or later the parents
should be informed. The grandmother could perhaps avoid having to reveal
what she has done by asking permission from the parents to allow her to
have the child baptized in a private ceremony, with just herself and the
priest, and then take charge of its religious upbringing. If the parents
consent, then she could have a priest or deacon complete the baptismal
rites and formally register the baptism.

If the parents are very much opposed, then there is little to be done
other than to await a suitable moment to inform them that their child is
already baptized.

In all cases she should do all in her power to transmit the faith to the
child, above all though her living witness to the Catholic faith.

* * *

Follow-up: Unauthorized Baptism [10-17-2006]

Several readers wrote in reply to our Oct. 3 column on unauthorized
baptism by a grandmother.

A California reader asked: "You remarked that a child should not be
baptized if there were no assurance he would be brought up Catholic.
What happened to the old idea of baptizing a child whose parents were
lackadaisical Catholics in the hope that the grace of the sacrament
would bring him back into the Church? That seems to make more sense than
not to baptize him at all."

The two cases are not quite the same. As our reader points out, the
Church will usually proceed with baptism in the case of children whose
parents are less then assiduous in practicing their faith. This is both
for the good of the child and because pastoral experience shows that the
occasion of a child's baptism can often awaken the parents from their
religious torpor.

Even if this does not happen, there is usually a reasonable hope that
the child will be offered some opportunity for religious education at
the time of first Communion and confirmation.

In the case we dealt with, only one parent was Christian and both had
decided not to baptize the child. So there was fairly scant hope of the
child being given a Christian upbringing.

Some reasonable, albeit far from certain, assurance of a Christian
education is required before baptism. This is because
—
barring extraordinary interventions
—
sacramental grace is called to be developed within the context of a
constantly developing relationship with God and God's family, the
Church.

This contextual development of the life of grace is something willed by
God as grace perfects, but does not substitute, the natural process of
human flourishing.

Regarding the validity of the baptism a reader pointed out: "A baptism
using the proper intention, form and matter is always valid ... though
perhaps illicit. The child was, in fact, baptized and should be recorded
as such. The matter that the parent did not agree is moot in regards
sacramental action."

Our reader is correct that the validity depends on the correct intent
and the use of the proper matter and form and that the parent's
opposition has no bearing at all on the baptism's sacramental validity.
This point was made in the original article.

Where our reader goes beyond the original article, and rightly so, is
with regards to the registration of the baptism. I had proposed a
strategy through which the grandmother could achieve the baptism while
avoiding a family feud. However, if this were not possible, then the
parish priest should duly register the baptism while noting the special
circumstances.

The grandmother should then take the necessary prudential steps to
inform the parents, even, as a last resort, in her will, in order to
avoid a possible future invalid baptismal ceremony of a person who is
already a member of Christ's mystical body.

A rather unusual e-mail came from South Africa: "A couple in our parish
had a premature baby who was seriously ill, and in fact, in danger of
dying. The baby was kept in an incubator in the intensive care unit of
the local hospital. The parents desired the child to be baptized, but
because of the medical circumstances, it was not practical.

"The priest then baptized the infant's brother 'by proxy,' that is, the
brother was not baptized, but was baptized on behalf of the infant who
was in danger of death.

"Is baptism by proxy allowed in these circumstances? What would the rite
be? For example, which child's name does the priest say? Could the
priest baptize 'through' the glass of the hospital without water? If
baptism by proxy is allowed, can one extend that to the other
sacraments? Do pastoral needs supersede the liturgical norms, as
circumstances require?"

Sad though it is, as the child in question eventually died, it is
necessary to admit that the priest made a grave mistake by this action.

The only sacrament that may be celebrated by proxy is matrimony. All of
the others require some degree of physical presence and contact of the
person receiving the sacrament.

This is not something that the Church can change for she has received
the sacraments, along with their inherent limitations, from Christ
himself.

In such cases it is almost always possible to baptize the child. A few
drops of water on the head, even from a syringe, while saying the proper
baptismal formula would have sufficed. If it were impossible for the
priest to enter the ward, a doctor or nurse could have performed the
baptism.

All the same, although the problem of infants who die before baptism is
still being studied from the theological point of view, the Church is
confident that a merciful God will not leave the parent's desires and
prayers unanswered. ZE06101729