UK poised to invade itself in Al-Qaeda crackdown

The UK armed forces are tonight set to invade the UK as a tense diplomatic stand-off looks increasingly likely to end in war. The UK government has claimed that ‘swift and decisive action’ is needed to ensure that the ‘United Kingdom does not harbour terrorists’.

The UK government has responded angrily to the claims, ‘Just because we give Al-Qaeda terrorists passports and a weekly benefit cheque doesn’t mean we’re supporting terrorism.’ But with the UK having previously attacked countries regardless of whether they have any genuine links to Al-Qaeda, the UK government is likely to be well aware that a swift invasion cannot be ruled out.

Independent observers have confirmed tonight that UK warplanes have been seen over the skies of the UK, in what has been said by commentators to be a ‘worrying escalation of tensions’.

The Sun supported swift military action against the UK, demanding that ‘our boys show them who’s boss. No, show us, who’s boss. Well, whatever’