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It's impossible to write about The Big Wedding without damning it with faint praise. It has the sort of cast that once would have once been a selling point but is now cause for skepticism, and its sprawling plot is haphazard at best. It's worth a chuckle or two, but nothing happens that you couldn't guess from sitting through the first half hour. It's probably better than writer/director Justin Zackham's script for The Bucket List, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, but you'd have to find someone who actually saw that saccharine mess to know.
Diane Keaton and Robert De Niro star as Ellie and Don Griffin, a divorced couple whose adopted son is getting married. Don is shacked up with Ellie's former best friend Bebe, played by Susan Sarandon, who's become a close mother figure to the grown Griffin brood. Unfortunately for Bebe, the groom-to-be Alejandro (Ben Barnes, wearing a lot of bronzer) never told his Catholic mother back in Colombia that his parents are divorced, and since she's on her way to the nuptials, he asks Ellie and Don to pretend to still be married. Why anyone goes along with this is beyond logic — but logic isn't important here. What is important is that there are plenty of awkward sexual situations (De Niro listing euphuisms for cunnilingus!), bodily functions (De Niro getting vomited on!), and slapstick (De Niro being punched in the face!).
The rest of the plot is rather exhausting to get into and plays on all sorts of icky cultural stereotypes. Alejandro's biological sister Nuria (Ana Ayora) is a gorgeous, hypersexual Latina who doesn't realize she should make men work for it until Ellie tells her about American woman's mores and some sort of possibly feminist jibber-jabber. (If Zackham read any of the hand-wringing essays or books on hook-up culture, he'd realize this is complete BS.) Alejandro's mom doesn't speak English and mostly clutches her rosary while looking on disapprovingly. Topher Grace appears as Alejandro's brother, a doctor who decided at 15 that he'd stay a virgin until he fell in love, an idea that he tosses out as soon as Nuria sheds her clothes to go for a dip in their pond. Katherine Heigl is yet another sibling with problems; she left her husband because they couldn't get pregnant, but now she's upset because he hasn't tried to get in touch with her even though she left him. Amanda Seyfried is Alejandro's fiancée; her parents are WASP-y racists who are apparently horrified that their daughter is marrying someone wearing a lot of bronzer. There's some kerfuffle about Catholicism, so they've hauled in Robin Williams to appear as a priest; he actually plays it pretty straight, which is probably for the best. The themes are: double standards, fear of revealing our true selves to the ones we love, and uproarious revelations. Except not that uproarious.
Based on the French film Mon frère se marie, The Big Wedding is ultimately as forgettable as its generic title. Zackham relies on 360 degree pans and treacly music to try and rouse the audience to care, but that's no replacement for a decent script. The only thing that sticks is De Niro's saucy satyr, which is a refreshing change from his more recent films. Keaton and Sarandon are a pleasing pair, and they deserve not only much better than this, but their own movie about cool female friends in their fifties. In fact, if everything about the wedding was scrapped and this was rewritten as a dramedy about the complicated relationship between these three, you might have an interesting movie.
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The movie great and co-star Diane Keaton's characters hit a club on a date night for the film, but the singing scenes didn't make the cut in the finished version, much to Nicholson's dismay.
Meyers tells WENN, "He gets up to sing for her (Keaton's character) and it's La Vie En Rose, which he sings to her in French. He worked really hard on it.
"I had to cut the scene out because it just didn't fit the following scene, where he goes out with another woman. When it came time to tell Jack I was cutting out the scene he didn't hold back his disappointment. He said, 'Chief, what do you mean?'
"He brings it up to me every time I see him and recently I saw him for his birthday and he cornered me (and said), 'Now, about that scene...'
"To make it up to him, I put it in the DVD, so at least he can watch it on there."

The script for the 2003 romantic comedy called for the movie veterans to pucker up, but the actress struggled with the scene because she kept forgetting her lines after locking lips with aged Lothario Nicholson.
And she admits the onscreen passion made her feel alive again years after her split from Al Pacino.
In an excerpt from her new book Then Again, she recalls, "For me, Diane, not (her character) Erica, the kiss was a reigniting reminder of something lost suddenly found.
"I don't know what Jack felt. I just know everything that came out of his mouth gave me the rush of a first-time love, over and over again. It wasn't down to the script. It was Jack."

The Piranha 3-D star, who wed actress June Diane Raphael last October (10), commissioned a professional to take on the lead groomsman role and even penned the faux-Nicholson's speech so he'd amuse guests.
Scheer explains, "I couldn't figure out who to be my best man (sic)... You don't want to offend one of my friends and I don't have a brother, so, I was like, 'Who could it be?' And I was like, 'I should get a Jack Nicholson impersonator to be my best man.'
"He was amazing. And I wrote him this whole speech so he could come out and be like, 'Paul and June are As Good As It Gets. Being at this wedding, I can cross it off my Bucket List.'"
But Scheer admits, the plan ultimately backfired.
He added, "He couldn't remember any of the stuff. He'd be like, 'Can you put it on a teleprompter for me?' And I was like, 'I can't put it on a teleprompter, it's a wedding.' And he was like, 'Alright I'll try.'
"I think he had a couple beers because he started forgetting his Jack Nicholson lines, and he just started saying things like, 'Yummy, yummy'... But then he goes, 'Well guess what, I'll just stand over here and give everybody hugs.'"

Seven days, seven chances to attain sweet, sweet television nirvana. In this week's Best of Seven, we give you every excuse to sit on the couch and veg out while you patiently await the Friday opening of director Christopher Nolan's much-anticipated (and already critically-praised) Inception - this summer's Twilight: Eclipse for adults and other people with brains.
Monday
7PM-9PM: Tosh.0, Comedy Central. Comedian Daniel Tosh's sarcasm-laden celebration of viral videos, YouTube celebrities, and other pop-culture ephemera has become one of the highest-rated shows in its time slot, reportedly nabbing almost 2.5 million viewers last week, surpassing both Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's ratings. It's America's Funniest Home Videos for the Twitter generation, and it's not too late to jump on the bandwagon: you can catch four Tosh.0 episodes in a row Monday night, right before another 2-hour block (9PM-11PM) of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (including the hilarious two-part 'The Gang Gets Whacked' episode and 'Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender').
8PM: Ratatouille, Disney Channel. If gross-out humor (Tosh.0 and It's Always Sunny) isn't your thing, enjoy Disney/Pixar's charming 2007 computer-animated story of a rat who dreams of cooking in a Parisian restaurant. Won an Academy Award for Best Animated Feature.
Tuesday
8:30PM: R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet, IFC. Did you know that singer-songwriter R. Kelly wrote a heartbreaking, 22-part rock-opera in 2005 and 2007, about the perils of one-night stands and the difficulties of keeping it real? Well, he did, and it's sort of kind of brilliant in it's own bizarre way. Start watching this and I guarantee you'll find yourself weirdly mesmerized by R. Kelly's operatic tale, much of which takes place in a closet, natch.
10PM: Curb Your Enthusiasm, TV Guide Channel. In 'The Shrimp Incident,' Larry David (Seinfeld creator Larry David) suspects that HBO executive Allan Wasserman has stolen some shrimp out of his Chinese food.
6PM - Midnight: This is not an endorsement, but if you're interested, apparently the Discovery Health channel has all baby-related programming for a whole six-hour block. Seriously. Hour after hour of Big Babies, and I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, and so on. A bit of research revealed that this is not, in fact, a singular phenomenon, but a relatively frequent occurrence on Discovery Health and TLC (this Wednesday). Who on Earth is watching this much baby-based programming? Possibly the same people who are watching Say Yes to the Dress in four hour blocks.
Wednesday
8PM: Chappelle's Show, Comedy Central. 2 episodes chock-full of Dave Chappelle's signature combination of wit, gross-out humor, and biting social commentary back-to-back.
8PM: The Departed, FX. Director Martin Scorsese directs the hell out of this South-Boston set tale of one cop's questionable loyalties (Matt Damon) and another's blurring identity (Leonardo DiCaprio), centered around an organized crime gang led by Jack Nicholson. Inspired by the popular 2002 Hong Kong crime film Infernal Affairs. Won four Academy Awards, including Best Director and Best Picture.
Thursday
6:25: Annie Hall, IFC. By far one of Woody Allen's best films, this 1977 comedy-drama stars the writer-director and Diane Keaton. The Best Picture winner follows the ups and downs of a long-term relationship between two mismatched New York neurotics.
9PM: Futurama, Comedy Central. A 3-hour Futurama comedy block!
11PM: Weird Science, VH1. The former music - now 80s nostalgia channel is airing the thoroughly odd (seriously, watch this movie while actually thinking about what is going on - notice the subtle racism and perverse sexual themes) 1985 John Hughes flick. Two high-school nerds computer-generate a hot babe to teach them how to meet girls, as well as have uncomfortable three-person showers. With Anthony Michael Hall.
Friday
6PM: Law and Order, TNT. Law and Order may be over, but it will be in syndication forever. Remember the halcyon days with a classic episode from 2004. In 'Fixed,' Fontana and Green reluctantly investigate after a motorist strikes a child-murderer and leaves him for dead, and the evidence they uncover leads McCoy to a startling discovery.
11PM: The Glades, A&amp;E. The pilot episode of A&amp;E's new Florida-based crime drama The Glades re-airs at 11, if you missed the original premiere. The LA Times calls it "an accomplished if occasionally vexing affair," so take that as you will.
Other: Inception comes out tonight!
Saturday
6PM: Avoid watching the HBO special 'Inception: HBO First Look.' Don't watch it! You won't want any spoilers when you enjoy Inception yourself, for the first or second time, on Saturday night. There is nothing else on TV tonight. Don't even look. Just go watch this movie.
Sunday
Sunday nights are the reason to buy HBO, plain and simple.
9PM: True Blood, HBO. Alcide and Sookie (Anna Paquin) turn to a packmaster for advice on wow to deal with Russell's minions; Tara considers a proposal from Ranklin; Joe Lee breaks his promise to Sam and Tommy; Jason meets a mysterious girl; an heirloom reminds Eric of his past.
10PM: Hung, HBO. Ray tries to prove to Darby and Damon that he is not an insensitive ex-jock; Tanya turns to Charlie for advice; Jessica feels the pinch of the economic downturn.
10:30PM: Entourage, HBO. Eric and Phil try to convince Drama that he has talent on the sitcom front; Ari (Jeremy Piven) resists Barbara's urgings to have Lizzie promoted; Turtle is intrigued by a business proposal from Alex; Scott Lavin continues to ingratiate himself with Vince.

The God of Legion secular Hollywood’s latest Biblically-inspired action flick is old-school an angry spiteful Almighty with a penchant for Old Testament theatrics. Fed up with humanity’s decadent warmongering ways He’s decided to pull the plug on the whole crazy experiment and start over from scratch.
Fortunately for us the God of Legion is also a rather lazy fellow. Instead of doing the apocalyptic work himself and wiping us out with a giant flood which worked perfectly well last time He opts to delegate the task to His army of angels — a questionable strategy that starts to fall apart when the archangel charged with leading the planned extermination Michael (Paul Bettany) refuses to comply.
Michael who unlike his boss still harbors affection for our sorry species abandons his post and descends to earth where inside the swollen belly of Charlie (Adrianne Palicki) an unwed mother-to-be working as a waitress in an out-of-the-way diner sits humanity’s lone hope for survival. Why is this particular baby so important? Is it the one destined to lead us to victory over Skynet? Heaven knows — Legion reveals little details its script devoid of actual scripture. What is clear is that God’s celestial hitmen want the kid whacked before it’s born.
But Michael won’t let humanity fall without a fight. Armed with a Waco-sized arsenal of assault weapons he hunkers down with the diner’s patrons a largely superfluous collection of thinly-sketched caricatures from various demographic groups led by Dennis Quaid as the diner’s grizzled owner Tyrese Gibson as a hip-hop hustler and Lucas Black as a simple-minded country boy.
Together they mount a heroic final stand against hordes of angels who’ve taken possession of “weak-willed” humans turning kindly old grandmas and mild-mannered ice cream vendors into snarling ravenous foul-mouthed beasts. They descend upon the ramshackle diner in a series of full-frontal assaults commanded by the archangel Gabriel (Kevin Durand) the George Pickett of End of Days generals.
Beneath its superficial religious facade Legion is really just a run-of-the-mill zombie flick a Biblical I Am Legend. Bettany an actor accustomed to smaller dramatic roles in films like A Beautiful Mind and The Da Vinci Code looks perfectly at ease in his first major action role wielding machine guns and bowie knives with equal aplomb. Conversely first-time director Scott Stewart a former visual effects artist does little to prove himself worthy of such a promotion serving up some impressive CGI work but not much else worthy of note.

New Line Cinema's The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, the third and final installment in director Peter Jackson's fantasy epic, continued its reign at the box office with a cork-popping take of $51.2 million* over the holiday weekend. What's more, The Return of the King posted the best Christmas day gross ever, taking in $14.5 million on Dec. 25 alone. The film also crossed the $200 million mark after only 11 days, beating The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, which took 12 days. That's definitely good news for New Line, whose Rings trilogy was a $300 million-plus make-or-break investment for the studio. Combined with the spirited take of four new wide releases, The Return of the King's strong legs also helped make this weekend the biggest Christmas weekend in box office history.The comedy Cheaper by the Dozen triumphed over rival newcomers hitting theaters this weekend, opening in second place with a generous three-day take of $28.2 million. The family comedy was followed by Cold Mountain, which debuted in the No. 3 position with nippy $14.5 million. Aided by its eight Golden Globe nominations and inclusion on many critics' Top 10 lists, the American Civil War drama is on a likely track for key Oscar nominations. Something's Gotta Give, now in its third week of release, placed fourth with $14.2 million, while the new Ben Affleck sci-fi thriller Paycheck, rounded out the Top Five with a foreseeable opening take of $13.9 million. The family pic Peter Pan, the last of this week's wide releases, kicked off in seventh place with a not-so-magical take of $11.4 million.Although this week's four new releases produced a combined first-day box office tally of almost $22 million, Paul Dergarabedian, president of the box office tracking service Exhibitor Relations, told The Associated Press Sunday the industry's total yearend box office revenues would likely fall short of last year's $9.3 billion record, marking the first year-to-year decline since 1991."The end of the year is looking pretty good," Dergarabedian said. "But not enough to jump ahead of last year's revenues ... because 2002 was so amazing."Last year, Hollywood benefited from an abundance of blockbusters, such as Spider-Man, Star Wars: Episode II--Attack of the Clones, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers and the sleeper hit, My Big Fat Greek Wedding.The Top 12 films this weekend grossed an ESTIMATED $168.6 million, up 26.39 percent from last weekend's $133.4 million take and up 8.18 percent from last year's $155.8 million.THE TOP TENNew Line Cinema's PG-13 rated fantasy epic The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King kept its No. 1 stronghold in its second week of release with an ESTIMATED $51.2 million (-29%) at 3,703 theaters (unchanged; $13,833 per theater). Its cume is approximately $223.6 million. Directed by Peter Jackson, it stars Elijah Wood, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Ian McKellen, Sean Astin, Liv Tyler, Miranda Otto, Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan.Twentieth Century Fox's PG rated comedy Cheaper by the Dozen debuted in second place with $28.2 million in 3,298 theaters, with an $8,558 per theater average. In the film, a contemporary remake of the 1950 Walter Lang comedy based on the novel by Ernestine Gilbreth Carey and Frank B. Gilbreth, mayhem ensues as a couple moves their large family of 12 children from a small town to an affluent Chicago suburb.Directed by Shawn Levy, it stars Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt, Hilary Duff and Tom Welling. Miramax Films' R rated Civil War drama Cold Mountain opened in third place with $14.5 million in 2,167 theaters with a $6,691 per theater average. In the film, a Confederate soldier makes the arduous journey from the front lines of the Civil War to his home in Cold Mountain, N.C., where his ladylove has been fighting battles of her own.Directed by Anthony Minghella, it stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman and Renee Zellweger. Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Something's Gotta Give dropped one spot to fourth in its third week with an ESTIMATED $11.4 million (+24%) at 2,709 theaters (+32 theaters; $5,242 per theater). Its cume is approximately $56.3 million. Directed by Nancy Meyers, it stars Jack Nicholson, Diane Keaton, Keanu Reeves, Amanda Peet and Frances McDormand.Paramount Pictures' PG-13 rated sci-fi thriller Paycheck kicked off in the No. 5 position with $13.9 million in 2,762 theaters with a $5,033 per theater average. In the film, a "reverse-engineer" who has had three years of his memory erased by a multimillion-dollar corporation, tries to piece together his past using a collection of random objects.Directed by John Woo, it stars Ben Affleck and Uma Thurman.*Box office estimates provided by Exhibitor Relations, Inc.Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated drama Mona Lisa Smile fell from its runner-up position last week to sixth place in its second week with an ESTIMATED $11.5 million (unchanged) in 2,677 theaters (unchanged; $4,296 per theater). Its cume is approximately $31.4 million.Directed by Mike Newell, it stars Julia Roberts, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Kirsten Dunst and Julia Stiles.Universal Pictures' PG rated family pic Peter Pan opened in seventh place with $11.4 million at 2,813 theaters with a $4,053 per theater average. In the film, based on the classic J.M. Barrie novel, the Darling family children receive a visit from Peter Pan, who takes them to Neverland where an ongoing war with the evil pirate Captain Hook is taking place.Directed by P.J. Hogan, it stars Jeremy Sumpter, Jason Isaacs and Ludivine Sagnier. Warner Bros.' R rated period actioner The Last Samurai, fell four spots to eighth place in its fourth week with an ESTIMATED $8.3 million (+8%) in 2,557 theaters (-381; $3,273 per theater). Its cume is approximately $74.3 million.Directed by Edward Zwick, it stars Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn and Timothy Spall.Miramax Films' R rated dark comedy Bad Santa dropped two rungs to ninth place in its fifth week with an ESTIMATED $4.5 million (-11%) at 1,710 theaters (-515 theaters; $2,644 per theater). Its cume is approximately $50.9 million. Directed by Terry Zwigoff, it stars Billy Bob Thornton, Bernie Mac, Tony Cox and John Ritter.New Line Cinema's PG rated holiday comedy Elf fell five places in its eighth week to round out the Top 10 with an ESTIMATED $4.2 million (-22%) at 2,015 theaters (-436 theaters; $2,122 per theater). Its cume is approximately $164.8 million. Directed by Jon Favreau, it stars Will Ferrell, James Caan, Bob Newhart, Ed Asner, Zooey Deschanel and Mary Steenburgen.OTHERSSony Picture Classics' PG-13 rated dance drama The Company debuted in 11 theaters with $96,939, with a $8,813 per theater average.The film centers on a Chicago ballet company--the difficult daily work, the intense pressures of performance and the richly textured behaviors of the dancers, whose professional and personal lives grow impossibly close.Directed by Robert Altman, it stars Neve Campbell, James Franco and Malcolm McDowell.New Market's R rated biopic Monster opened in four theaters with $84,156 with an impressive $21,039 per theater average. The dark tale is based on the true story of Aileen Wuornos, one of America's first female serial killers.Directed by Patty Jenkins, it stars Charlize Theron and Christina Ricci.WEEKEND COMPARISON Last year, New Line's PG-13 rated The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers came in at No. 1 in its second week with $48.8 million in 3,622 theaters (unchanged; $13,494 per theater); DreamWorks' biopic Catch Me If You Can opened in second place with $30 million 3,156 theaters ($9,523 per theater); Warner Brothers' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Two Weeks Notice followed in third place in its second week of release with $15.5 million in 2,755 theaters (unchanged; $5,633 per theater).
Go to our Box Office section for recent weekend movie analysis.

It was a tough sell, but New Line Cinema's supernatural drama The Butterfly Effect, starring Ashton Kutcher in his first non-comedic role, soared to the top of the box office this weekend with a colorful $17.1 million*.
The Butterfly Effect's ripples were enough to send last week's box office topper, Along Came Polly, to second place with $16.6 million, followed by this week's only other new wide release, Win a Date With Tad Hamilton!, which won the No. 3 position with a rather trivial $7.5 million.
After weeks of close calls, Tim Burton's Big Fish finally overcame The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, defeating Peter Jackson's fantasy epic with a lofty $7.3 million. Return of the King, meanwhile, rounded out the Top Five with a still noble $6.8 million.
This week's box office also saw the reemergence of Mystic River. Warner Bros. decided to expand the film's release to approximately 1,194 sites Friday because of the critical praise it's received during the awards season. Since its release Oct. 10, Mystic has collected numerous nominations and awards for its director Clint Eastwood and the ensemble cast. This weekend, the film came in at No. 10 with $3.1 million, bringing its cumulative total to $58.5 million.
THE TOP TEN
New Line Cinema's R rated supernatural drama The Butterfly Effect kicked off in the No. 1 position with an ESTIMATED $17.1 million in 2,605 theaters, with a $6,564 per theater average.
In The Butterfly Effect, a college student discovers a way to travel into the past to access sublimated childhood memories. He soon realizes that in occupying his childhood body, he can stop the unsettling events before they occur.
Directed by Eric Bress and J. Mackye Gruber, it stars Ashton Kutcher, Amy Smart, Elden Henson and Ethan Suplee.
Universal Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Along Came Polly, last week's box office champ, dropped to second place in its second week with an ESTIMATED $16.6 million (-40%) in 2,995 theaters (+11 theaters; $5,543 per theater). Its cume is approximately $53.5 million.
Directed by John Hamburg, it stars Ben Stiller, Jennifer Aniston, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Debra Messing.
DreamWorks' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Win a Date With Tad Hamilton! debuted in the No. 3 spot with an ESTIMATED $7.5 million in 2,711 theaters with a $2,767 per theater average.
In the film, a grocery clerk in rural West Virginia wins a date with big-screen idol Tad Hamilton, much to the chagrin of her best friend and co-worker Pete, who is secretly in love with her.
Directed by Robert Luketic, it stars Kate Bosworth, Josh Duhamel and Topher Grace.
Sony's PG-13 rated drama Big Fish dropped a notch to third place in its seventh week with an ESTIMATED $7.3 million (-29%) in 2,438 theaters (-76 theaters; $2,994 per theater). Its cume is approximately $49.1 million.
Directed by Tim Burton, it stars Ewan McGregor, Albert Finney, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange, Helena Bonham Carter and Alison Lohman.
New Line Cinema's PG-13 rated fantasy epic The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King fell three rungs to fifth place in its sixth week with an ESTIMATED $6.8 million (-33%) at 2,558 theaters (-445 theaters; $2,678 per theater). Its cume is approximately $337.8 million.
Directed by Peter Jackson, it stars Elijah Wood, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Ian McKellen, Sean Astin, Liv Tyler, Miranda Otto, Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan.
*Box office estimates provided by Exhibitor Relations, Inc.
Twentieth Century Fox's PG rated family comedy Cheaper by the Dozen dropped two notches to sixth place in its fourth week with an ESTIMATED $6.6 million (-27%) in 2,810 theaters (-215 theaters; $2,349 per theater). Its cume is approximately $122.7 million.
Directed by Shawn Levy, it stars Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt, Hilary Duff and Tom Welling.
Miramax Films' R rated Civil War drama Cold Mountain fell one place to seventh place in its fifth week with an ESTIMATED $5.3 million (-22%) at 2,802 theaters (unchanged; $1,892 per theater average). Its cume is approximately $72.9 million.
Directed by Anthony Minghella, it stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman and Renee Zellweger.
Warner Bros. PG-13 rated actioner Torque dropped three pegs to eighth place in its second week with an ESTIMATED $4.4 million in 2,463 theaters (unchanged; $1,797 per theater). Its cume is approximately $17.2 million.
Directed by Joseph Kahn, it stars Ice Cube, Martin Henderson, Monet Mazur, Matt Schulze and Jaime Pressly.
Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Something's Gotta Give dropped two spots to ninth in its seventh week with an ESTIMATED $4.1 million (-29%) at 2,143 theaters (-359 theaters; $1,913 per theater). Its cume is approximately $107.1 million.
Directed by Nancy Meyers, it stars Jack Nicholson, Diane Keaton, Keanu Reeves, Amanda Peet and Frances McDormand.
Warner Bros.' dramatic R rated Mystic River expanded again after 16 weeks of release to round out the Top Ten with $3.1 million (+851%) at 1,327 theaters (+1,194 theaters; $2,355 per theater). Its cume is approximately $58.5 million.
Directed by Clint Eastwood, it stars Sean Penn, Tim Robbins, Kevin Bacon, Laurence Fishburne, Laura Linney and Marcia Gay Harden.
WEEKEND COMPARISON
This week, the Top 12 films grossed an estimated $83.4 million, down 12.21 percent from last week's $95.05 million, but up 4.39 percent from last year's $79.9 million.
Last year, Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated horror pic Darkness Falls debuted at the No. 1 spot with $12 million at 2,837 theaters with a $4,239 per theater average; Warner Bros. PG rated comedy Kangaroo Jack came in second in its second week with $11.5 million in 2,848 theaters (+30 theaters; $4,055 per theater average); and Miramax's PG-13 rated Chicago came in at No. 3 with $8.2 million in 2,848 theaters+59 theaters; $13,375 per theater).

The King has finally been dethroned.
The Ben Stiller/Jennifer Aniston farce Along Came Polly debuted at No. 1 this weekend with $27.6 million*, officially ending The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King's four week reign at the top of the box office. Polly is the second biggest January debut since Star Wars: Special Edition, which opened in 1997 with $35.9 million.
After weeks of heavy dramas angling for awards considerations, sometimes all an audience wants is a laugh, Paul Dergarabedian, president of box office tracker Exhibitor Relations told The Associated Press.
"[Ben Stiller] does seem to play this role a lot, but he does it well," Dergarabedian said. "The audience obviously loves Ben Stiller in this type of movie."
Polly also becomes the biggest opening film of all time for the Martin Luther King weekend and, if the estimates hold through Monday, the figures could put this weekend as the fourth best MLK holiday weekend overall. The same weekend in 2001, led by the dance drama Save the Last Dance at $23.4 million, still holds the record as the best MLK weekend at $124.9 million for the top 12 films over four days.
The real race this weekend seemed to be between second, third and fourth places, with a scant $200,000 difference between the three. As of Sunday's estimates, second place belonged to Big Fish at $10.4 million, which nearly came in first last weekend when it first expanded wide. The high-octance Torque revved up in its opening weekend, coming in third with $10.27 million, while The Return of the King slid down to fourth place with $10.2 million. These spots could be adjusted in the final tally, which will be released Tuesday.
The family comedy Cheaper by the Dozen rounded out the Top Five with $8.7 million, while another newcomer, the animated Disney's Teacher's Pet, failed to make the Top 10 in its opening weekend, taking in a piddly $2.4 million.
THE TOP TEN
Universal Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Along Came Polly debuted at the top of the list with an ESTIMATED $27.6 million in 2,984 theaters. Its $9,249 per theater average was the highest of any film opening wide this weekend.
The story revolves around an insurance risk assessor on the rebound who falls for an avowed risk taker.
Directed by John Hamburg, it stars Ben Stiller, Jennifer Aniston, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Debra Messing.
Sony's PG-13 rated drama Big Fish held onto second place in its sixth week with an ESTIMATED $10.4 million (-25%) in 2,514 theaters (+108 theaters; $4,137 per theater). Its cume is approximately $37.9 million.
Directed by Tim Burton, it stars Ewan McGregor, Albert Finney, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange, Helena Bonham Carter and Alison Lohman.
Warner Bros. PG-13 rated actioner Torque premiered in the third spot with an ESTIMATED $10.27 million in 2,463 theaters and averaging $4,170 per theater.
On the mean streets of Los Angeles, a biker gang member must outrace his enemies if he wants to clear his name and live to ride another day.
Directed by Joseph Kahn, it stars Ice Cube, Martin Henderson, Monet Mazur, Matt Schulze and Jaime Pressly.
New Line Cinema's PG-13 rated fantasy epic The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King fell down a few spots to take fourth in its fifth week of release with an ESTIMATED $10.2 million (-28%) at 3,003 theaters (-529 theaters; $3,397 per theater). Its cume is approximately $326.7 million.
Directed by Peter Jackson, it stars Elijah Wood, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Ian McKellen, Sean Astin, Liv Tyler, Miranda Otto, Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan.
*Box office estimates provided by Exhibitor Relations, Inc.
Twentieth Century Fox's PG rated family comedy Cheaper by the Dozen dropped two notches to fifth place in its third week of release with an ESTIMATED $8.7 million (-26%) in 3,025 theaters (-213 theaters; $2,893 per theater). Its cume is approximately $111.9 million.
Directed by Shawn Levy, it stars Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt, Hilary Duff and Tom Welling.
Miramax Films' R rated Civil War drama Cold Mountain slid two places to sixth place in its fourth week of release with an ESTIMATED $7 million (-11%) at 2,802 theaters (+500 theaters, $2,499 per theater average). Its cume is approximately $65 million.
Directed by Anthony Minghella, it stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman and Renee Zellweger.
Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Something's Gotta Give followed the trend and dropped two spots to seventh in its sixth week of release with an ESTIMATED $6 million (-22%) at 2,502 theaters (-374 theaters; $2,398 per theater). Its cume is approximately $100.9 million.
Directed by Nancy Meyers, it stars Jack Nicholson, Diane Keaton, Keanu Reeves, Amanda Peet and Frances McDormand.
Miramax's R rated comedy My Baby's Daddy dropped to eighth place in its second week with an ESTIMATED $3.6 million (-52%) in 1,446 theaters (-1 theater; $2,527 per theater). The bachelor buddy comedy's cume is $12.3 million.
Directed by Cheryl Dunye, it stars Eddie Griffin, Anthony Anderson and Michael Imperioli.
Warner Bros.' R rated period actioner The Last Samurai stayed in ninth place in its seventh week of release with an ESTIMATED $3.12 million (-31%) in 1,403 theaters (-498 theaters; $2,224 per theater). Its cume is approximately $101.9 million.
Directed by Edward Zwick, it stars Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn and Timothy Spall.
Buena Vista's PG-13 rated British comedy Calendar Girls moved up the list from last week's 12th place to No. 10 in its fifth week with an ESTIMATED $3.1 million (-17%) in 967 theaters (+10 theaters; $3,206 per theater). Its cume is approximately $17.2 million.
Directed by Nigel Cole, it stars Helen Mirren and Julie Walters.
OTHER OPENINGS
Buena Vista's PG rated animated Disney's Teacher's Pet failed to make the Top 10 in its opening weekend, taking in an ESTIMATED $2.4 million in 2,027 theaters with an average of $1,184 per theater.
The film is a quirky animated kid's movie about a dog who dreams of becoming a human boy, and his master, who just wants a dog.
Directed by Timothy Bjorklund, the vocal cast includes Nathan Lane, Kelsey Grammer, Shaun Fleming, Debra Jo Rupp, Jerry Stiller and David Ogden Stiers.
WEEKEND COMPARISON
This week, the Top 12 films grossed an estimated $95.5 million, up 5 percent from last week's $91 million, but down 3.99 percent from last year's $99.5 million.
Last year, Warner Bros. PG rated comedy Kangaroo Jack opened at No. 1 with $16.5 million in 2,818 theaters with a $7,770 per theater average; Sony's PG-13 rated National Security opened at No. 2 with $14.3 million in 2,729 theaters with a $6,161 per theater; and 20th Century Fox's Just Married fell to third place in its second week with $14.6 million in 2,769 theaters (+3 theaters; $4,974 per theater).

After a heated battle, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King sank Big Fish and reclaimed the No. 1 spot at the box office this weekend by a very slim margin--just $400,000.
In fact, the race was so close that it was impossible to call until Monday, when final weekend figures were released. The final tally shows that Return of the King came in first with $14.2 million* while Big Fish crossed the line second with $13.8 million.
But estimates made Sunday--when studios make projections on how big an audience their films will pull in on the last day of the weekend--painted a different picture. Sony Pictures yesterday estimated that Big Fish had taken in $14.5 million, which would have been enough to dethrone Return of the King, which had posted a $14.1 million take.
The paltry $400,000 separating the top films had many pundits predicting that the rankings would flip once the final figures were released--and that's precisely what happened.
If any film was going to challenge Return of the King's reign this weekend, Big Fish was the only one of the three wide releases with a chance in Mordor to do it.
Big Fish, which debuted in only six theaters Dec. 10, expanded to 125 theaters Christmas day and took in a $2.5 million last weekend alone, averaged a monstrous $20,355 per theater. This weekend saw Big Fish's first wide expansion as the film played across 2,406 screens.
But Return of the King's take was enough to keep it at the No. 1 position for a fourth straight week and enough to push it passed the $300 million mark.
Meanwhile, Cheaper by the Dozen, which claimed third place with a still strong $12 million, became the 26th 2003 film to cross $100 million.
The comedy Something's Gotta Give also continued strongly, coming in fourth with $8.2 million, followed by the Civil War drama Cold Mountain, which rounded out the Top Five with $7.9 million.
This week's two other wide releases, the romantic comedy Chasing Liberty and the urban comedy My Baby's Daddy failed to make the Top Five. My Baby's Daddy, which opened in only 1,447 theaters, came in sixth with an expected $7.8 million, while Chasing Liberty debuted at No. 7 with a rather constrained $6 million.
THE TOP TEN
New Line Cinema's PG-13 rated fantasy epic The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King retained its No.1 title in its fourth week of release with an ESTIMATED $14.1 million (-50%) at 3,532 theaters (-171 theaters; $3,706 per theater). Its cume is approximately $312.2 million.
Directed by Peter Jackson, it stars Elijah Wood, Viggo Mortensen, Orlando Bloom, Ian McKellen, Sean Astin, Liv Tyler, Miranda Otto, Billy Boyd and Dominic Monaghan.
Sony's PG-13 rated drama Big Fish expanded to 2,406 theaters in its fifth week of release to take second place with an ESTIMATED $13.8 million with a $6,027 per theater average. Its cume is approximately $24 million.
In the film, a son comes to understand his father through the older man's fantastic stories.
Directed by Tim Burton, it stars Ewan McGregor, Albert Finney, Billy Crudup, Jessica Lange, Helena Bonham Carter and Alison Lohman.
Twentieth Century Fox's PG rated family comedy Cheaper by the Dozen dropped one notch to third place in its second week of release with an ESTIMATED $12 million (-45%) in 3,238 theaters (-171 theaters; $3,706 per theater). Its cume is approximately $101.3 million.
Directed by Shawn Levy, it stars Steve Martin, Bonnie Hunt, Hilary Duff and Tom Welling.
Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Something's Gotta Give followed the trend and dropped one spot to fourth in its fifth week of release with an ESTIMATED $8.2 million (-30%) at 2,876 theaters (+68 theaters; $2,851 per theater). Its cume is approximately $92.8 million.
Directed by Nancy Meyers, it stars Jack Nicholson, Diane Keaton, Keanu Reeves, Amanda Peet and Frances McDormand.
Miramax Films' R rated Civil War drama Cold Mountain fell a notch to fifth place in its third week of release with an ESTIMATED $7.9 million (-32%) at 2,302 theaters (+68 theaters, $3,438 per theater average). Its cume is approximately $55.3 million.
Directed by Anthony Minghella, it stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman and Renee Zellweger.
Miramax's R rated comedy My Baby's Daddy kicked off in sixth place with an ESTIMATED $7.8 million in 1,447 theaters with an impressive $5,417 per theater average.
In the film, three bachelor buddies are in for a rude awakening when their girlfriends all get pregnant at the same time.
Directed by Cheryl Dunye, it stars Eddie Griffin, Anthony Anderson and Michael Imperioli.
*Box office estimates provided by Exhibitor Relations, Inc.
Warner Bros.' PG-13 rated romantic comedy Chasing Liberty debuted in seventh place with an ESTIMATED $7.8 million at 2,400 theaters with a $2,506 per theater average.
In the film, the 18-year-old daughter of the president of the United States runs off on a romantic adventure during the family's European getaway.
Directed by Andrew Cadiff, it stars Mandy Moore, Matthew Goode, Jeremy Piven, Annabella Sciorra and Mark Harmon.
Paramount Pictures' PG-13 rated sci-fi thriller Paycheck fell three positions to No. 8 in its third week of release with an ESTIMATED $5.2 million (-47%) in 2,762 theaters (unchanged; $1,883 per theater). Its cume is approximately $46.4 million.
Directed by John Woo, it stars Ben Affleck and Uma Thurman.
Warner Bros.' R rated period actioner The Last Samurai fell one rung to ninth place in its sixth week of release with an ESTIMATED $4.5 million (-46%) in 1,901 theaters (-500 theaters; $2,838 per theater). Its cume is approximately $97.1 million.
Directed by Edward Zwick, it stars Tom Cruise, Ken Watanabe, Tony Goldwyn and Timothy Spall.
Sony Pictures' PG-13 rated drama Mona Lisa Smile dropped three notches to round out the Top Ten in its fourth week of release with an ESTIMATED $4.5 million (-46%) in 2,500 theaters (-214 theaters; $1,800 per theater). Its cume is approximately $57 million.
Directed by Mike Newell, it stars Julia Roberts, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Kirsten Dunst and Julia Stiles.
WEEKEND COMPARISON
This week, the Top 12 films grossed an estimated $92.4 million, down about 23 percent from last week's $120.1 million, but up 4.9 percent from last year's $88.1 million.
Last year, 20th Century Fox's PG-13 rated comedy Just Married opened at No. 1 with $17.5 million in 2,766 theaters, a $6,345 per theater average; New Line's PG-13 rated The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers dropped to No. 2 in its fourth week with $14.7 million in 3,477 theaters (-145 theaters; $4,244 per theater); and DreamWorks' biopic Catch Me If You Can held on to third place in its third week with $14.6 million in 3,225 theaters (+55 theaters; $$4,537 per theater).