Bacon flavored coffee syrup, too far?

Kidding, there’s no such thing as too far when it comes to bacon. Except I’m vegetarian so the closest I ever come is fake bacon which tastes like shit every time I eat i which is often because I’m always hoping the next time it doesn’t. But it never fails to disappoint. Your brain just exploding aside, this is some bacon flavored coffee syrup from Torani.

Torani Bacon Syrup ($7) is a sweet, smoky, salty syrup that can be used in everything from milkshakes to manhattans to give each drink a little pork. For the truly bold, mix with Bakon Vodka for a drink only a fast-food executive could love.

Mmmm, I’m puking in my shoes already. Thank God I’m not wearing socks. Wait — or shoes. Then why’d you draw all over my face with a Sharpie? Don’t you people know the rules?! AM I THE ONLY ONE AROUND HERE WHO CAREABOUT THE RULES?! MARK IT ZERO! Torani Bacon Syrup [uncrate] Thanks to Matt, who just uses Bac’n Bits instead of artificial sweetener like a normal person.