Imperial Dreams

Adventures in the Roman Empire

You have not met me before, but I thought it would be sporting to inform you before hand of my plans to kill you. My name, is and I am the man who is going to kill you. You wouldn’t know, but I am one of the greatest assassins in the verse, and normally i prefer to keep things on a strictly professional basis. However, you have done what many have thought impossible. You have offended me, and I do not suffer insults lightly. I will destroy you, completely and utterly. However, before I do so, I am going to kill everybody you love, I am going to destroy the Empire you value so much, and I am going to take away everything you hold dear. Then, and only then will I subject you to cruel torture, the most horrible torture that any individual has ever suffered. And after you have been ruined more than any mortal creature has been ruined, I will deliver you a death of such extreme agony that your previous tortures will seem a blissful memory in comparison. You might think that I am being flippant with my threats, but I assure you I am being deadly serious. There is nothing you can do, I am sending this letter only as a courtesy, to let you know that there is no hope for you to survive.

Keiko, inventory
A good katana in slightly rough shape
Bastard sword, chipped
Long sword, burnt handle
A mediocre katana, good condition
Self bow, magical, provides one lightning bolt per day, for invocation whisper: ‘eco-terrorism’
2 japanese sandals, one of each gender
1 ruby, to be put into a ring

The glaive of Goroa samura
+2 Glaive, extra 1D12 damage against undead
This glaive gained notoriety for its use during the battle of the Bloody Grass, where the Ronin Koro, Gatsu was able to show great bravery and held off an army of attacking zombies for an entire day. The glaive was used for the next 200 years until it was lost in Planescape/Sigil

“Hope’s Last Tea. When an archon of sufficient power is destroyed, normally their bodies burn into a cripse. However, if the Archon died still believing that their mission could be accomplished, then a feather like this is created. The feather can be used to negate the negative effects of the lower planes. One person only, constant effect.

The TV Tropes of our own game

Setting Generally

Library Game

Luke I am your Father – Aquilinus to Shahrazad
Punch Clock Villian – Aquilinus
Go Karting With Bowser – Aquilinus’s relationship with Shahrazad in a nutshell, the vast majority of his scenes are basically this
10-Minute Retirement – Constantly attempted by Aquilinus, who is too spineless to ever actually do this
Faking the Dead – Again, attempted on a regular basis with Aquilinus

-Short summary
We be Chillin’ down in Ravenloft after our Bros got dun convinced into going by the ghost of a dude who didn’t realize he was dun dead till it was too late. Yah get me so far?

-Beginning of long summary
After a long chase. Our crew found themselves in a roman occupied town being mugged. However, not being the type of people to stand for such things, our group swiftly dispatched the attacking party, something that at the time seemed to be of very little significance.

From there they were engaged by a strange man who was then “blown off” of by self proclaimed group leader “Ashtaad.” (I have no idea how to spell that name).

After a Goblin overhears Gleadwine talking, he cuts the conversation short and asks Gleadwine a lot of seemingly random assortment of questions about his belief system. Gleadwine answered and unwittingly welcomes more chaos for our crew.

The Goblins take our crew to their underground tunnel system and appoint them religious leaders. While there Gleadwine is offered five female goblin sex workers who he courteously declines (again in typical Gleadwine fashion, accidentally gaining a new admirer: “Flowers”).

Feeling that things are safe, the females of the crew take a shared bath (offered by the goblins). It is while Gleadwine is sitting outside waiting for them to finish, he learns that this particular set of goblins finds a new religious leader every week and then dispatches them by the end of the week.

Acting on pure impulse as always, Gleadwine crashes into the bathing room and picks up everyone from his crew. He the proceeds to carry everyone (all very wet, naked and confused) at top speed, out of the goblin tunnel system. Not a single goblin put up a fight due to the irregular behavior exhibited by Gleadwine (it is not custom to run around with naked, wet women in your arms and a naked goblin on your back).

From there Gleadwine blindly runs through the town and stumbles into a bath house. From there the group is attacked (now all naked) by the gang the muggers had previously belonged to. After a very bloody battle the group gains a new addition (Gregor the Gay Orc) and Gleadwine is slightly traumatized from killing an “innocent” bath worker (Olga).

Leaving the bathhouse in a hurry, they happen upon the strange man from earlier and decide to act on his request for them to visit his town to “help.”