Friday, May 30, 2008

The guy at the desk next to me is spastically shaking his leg so much that the rest of his body is slowly undulating along to the beat. I have observed this in my peripheral all morning and finally glanced over to see if there was something wrong with him. He gazed at his monitor like a glassy eyed jello mold of a human being, twitching and undulating. Then I notice the empty cans of coke on the desk and the one he was nursing. It seems that soda has rendered him into a pudgy quivering pile of festering diabetes. That's when I went into the kitchen and noticed the new delivery of 116 cases of soda.

This got me thinking about how much soda this country must drink. I stopped drinking soda my senior year of high school because I read the label and realized I could be drinking water instead and avoid the pile of crap in each can, but this isn't about being on my slurry free horse. It's about benzine, aspertame, high fructose corn syrup, artificial flavoring, and the fattest country on the planet. So here are a few morsels of truth to think about over the weekend.

2. The relationship between soft drink consumption and body weight is so strong that researchers calculate that for each additional soda consumed, the risk of obesity increases 1.6 times. James A Howenstine M.D. A Physician’s Guide to Natural Health Products That Work

3. Coca-Cola paid the Boys & Girls Clubs of America $60 million to market its brand exclusively in over 2000 facilities.

4. Adolescents who consume soft drinks display a risk of bone fractures three to four-fold higher than those who do not. James A Howenstine M.D. A Physician’s Guide to Natural Health Products That Work

5. In a study of 91,249 women followed for eight years, those who consumed one or more soft drinks per day were twice as likely as those who consumed less than one per month to develop diabetes. American Journal of Public Health

6. A child sized portion of soda at McDonalds is now 12 ounces. They just came out with the "Hugo" weighing in at 42 ounces.No doubt an homage to Hurley from Lost (who is the best damn thing about that show).

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Just a quick shot after one of DC's 3 goals scored against Toronto. The smoke bombs gave the event a European flavor. DC didn't look so hot during the first half but they pulled it out in the second, scoring 2 goals back to back. We had the pleasure of hanging and tailgating with the Screaming Eagles.

Friday, May 23, 2008

One this long holiday weekend of gas consumption let's pause to consider a few things to curb the guilt... besides riding a bike.

First up from the good folks over at Metaeffcient. The Envision Solar Grove™ is a system of solar cell canopies designed for parking lots. While providing shade for your car they eliminate light pollution, curb hazardous run off and the urban heat-island effect, all while powering the mall you parked at. I would have one over my driveway if I didn't have one of these parked there.

Start composting for free!For all you locals out there Montgomery County MD is giving away compost bins to all residents. Compost bins can cost a ton for some reason but these durable plastic bins work great and the price is right. I picked one up from the Bethesda office last month and I am digging it. Aside from a lack of sunlight in the backyard it is doing pretty well. Check your local government waste collection agency to see if they have a similar program.

Use a reel mower.Late last fall a neighbor put an old push reel mower on the curb which promptly snatched up like a crazy pack rat. When I bought my first house I went out and bought a pretty nice $350 dollar mower. This mower now acts as a really expensive back up to my free push reel mower which cost nothing to run, produces no harmful exhaust and best of all gives me a good upper body work out if I want. Beyond the obvious benefits, a push reel mower is much better for your lawn than an electric or gas powered mower. The clean cut of the reel mower cuts the grass rather than smashing the ends off. Also when you don't bag, the grass clippings provide a natural fertilizer for the yard.

Cook LocalChallenge yourself to get all the ingredients for your holiday BBQ from local sources. I am going to a friend's house for a nice little grillout chillout on Sunday. I am going to get all the ingredients for the dish I am bringing from the Saturday farmer's market in Silver Spring, and the Sunday farmer's market in Takoma Park. From these I should be able to get most meat, vegetable, or dairy products I need. Shopping locally means the food hasn't had to travel around the world to get to you. This gives you fresher food and less environmental impact. Why should I by apple that had to travel here from New Zealand when I can get them fresh from a farm in Purcelville?

Friday, May 16, 2008

Although it was raining there was a pretty good turnout in both Silver Spring and Bethesda this morning. In Silver Spring the festivities even included a group of local high school cheerleaders. I joined a group ride to Bethesda from the Discovery Channel HQ and was pleasantly surprised by the percentage of people on the ride who are new to bike commuting. And here I thought it was going to be a bunch of regular commuters who happened to be in the area. I guess that means the day was a success.

Lots of prizes and gifts were given out in Bethesda so I thought I would hand out a few CycleJerk Honorable Mentions:

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Bike to Work Day is to bike commuters what Flag Day is to Betsy Ross impersonators. Yes it may rain tomorrow and you might get a little wet... (or a lot), but remember, a bunch of wet cyclists draws a lot more attention than a bunch of dry ones, and isn't that the point of tomorrow, to raise awareness about bike commuting? This year seems to be pretty well organized by WABA with group rides, pit stops, and raffles, and such it should be a pretty good time rain or shine. So think hard kids, if you are on the fence about riding to work tomorrow and remember, regret is insight that comes a day too late.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Yesterday some of your morning commutes may have been interrupted by a water main break that resulted in the flooding of Jones Mill Rd. at East West Highway. This resulted in a big fat sinkhole which took out a telephone pole next to the road and the appearance of a bunch of "people" in orange jumpsuits. Several of these strange jumpsuits proceeded to stand at the edge of the hole and point and bark at two jumpsuits in the hole who appeared to be doing all the work. This strange behavior has never been documented before. After fixing the problem the alleged orange jumpsuited do-gooders disappeared as mysteriously as they arrived. These photos are the only proof of their existence.

Friday, May 2, 2008

What did Albert Hofmann do immediately after discovering and ingesting LSD for the first time? He jumped on his bike of course. What better way to embark on the first acid trip than on a bike. This is fitting, since the effects of LSD and cycling are almost identical. Both incite a dangerous amount of fun, both inevitably lead to silly clothing, and both provide the user delusions of grandeur... the list is endless. Albert said of LSD "It is just a tool to turn us into what we are supposed to be." See? The same as cycling... RIP ALbert

Lance is embracing the urban bike scene by opening a commuting/training focused bike shop in Austin called "Mellow Jonny's"

Lance's new fixie dealio from Trek is so advanced it doesn't even need a chain. Just the gears to imply the presence of a chain is enough to propel most any hipster.