Child Custody Battle

Why is it so hard to reach an agreement on our custody arrangements?

Even under the best circumstances, creating child custody arrangements can be stressful and difficult. There are so many factors to consider and many aspects of the custody arrangements that will need to be decided on.

Even the most amiable parents are not going to agree on everything. After all, you are getting divorced for a reason.

Sometimes parents are able to work out their differences in a civil manner but when they can't, the situation turns into a “custody battle”. Thankfully, there is software available that will help you turn chaos into compromise.

Custody X Change is software that creates professional custody agreements and custody schedules.

Using Custody X Change to create your custody agreement is a great way to keep everything organized and avoid conflict without forgetting any important parts of the agreement.

What are some of the issues that may be addressed in the agreement?

What time do I have to pick my child up? What happens when my child's birthday is on "my" weekend? What if there is a family emergency and I need to have my child with me? Who will get my child on Christmas? Which one of us will go to parent-teacher conferences? What if my ex signs my child up for soccer and I have to take him to practice on "my" time? Who is going to pay for her braces?

There are endless questions that will need to be answered and addressed in your custody agreement. You are going to need to put a lot of details in your parenting plan / custody agreement.

Since your custody agreement is going to serve as the ground rules for raising your child, you should put a lot of thought into the contents of your custody agreement. You may address any issue you feel is relevant and include it in your plan.

What are some of the issues that may make it hard for us to compromise?

How can you make an "agreement" when you can't seem to agree on anything?

The moniker “custody battle” is fitting if you are unable to agree with your spouse on the custody issues involving your child. Sometimes the battle can feel like outright “war”.

There are several reasons why parents are unable to work together on their parenting agreements. The problems may lie with one or both parents:

Using the child as a weapon. So many times parents are so hurt by or angry with the other parent that they use their child to hurt the other parent. They are so caught up in their own pain and misery that they don't realize how harmful it is for their child.

Using the child for financial gain. Some parents will do everything they can to keep their child with them as much as possible in order to get more child support or have to pay less child support. Many times the court will be able to tell if your request for custody is sincere.

Being hostile or hateful. Some couples are so volatile that they can't, won't, or refuse to agree on anything. They refuse to compromise or cooperate with each other because they are stubborn and selfish.

Not putting the needs of the child first. Every court in the country considers the best interests of the child to be the most important factor in custody cases. You should make every effort to set your differences aside for the sake of your child.

You might have other reasons for not being able to reach an agreement with your ex. The important thing is to recognize the reasons why you are unable to agree and address them.

What can I do to try to reach a custody agreement with my spouse?

The first thing you will want to do is to identify the reasons you are unable to work together to create a plan. Once you know what the problem is, it will be easier to fix. Once you do that, you might want to consider some of these options:

You should keep in mind that your relationship is not over. It is just changing. You will be tied to each other because you share a child. It is a lifelong bond and it doesn't end when your child reaches adulthood.

You have the option of choosing to have a civil relationship or a combative one. You may as well try to get along now instead of spending your years battling with the other parent in misery.

You can attend mediation or private counseling. Many parents have found success by using an impartial party to help them agree on their custody arrangements. Mediation is free in many municipalities. Some states even require parents to attend mediation prior to a ruling.

You can use tools to help you create your custody agreement. There are many resources available to help parents. Many states offer divorce education and/or parenting classes that you may attend. You can also use Custody X Change to make your agreement.

How does Custody X Change work?

Custody X Change is a computer software program that allows you to create your child custody agreement. It's easy to use and as simple as answering questions and entering information.

With Custody X Change you can:

Create a calendar and schedule and print off several years of the calendar

Easily put in the time the child will spend with each parent

Divide the holidays

Create special events time when the schedule has a one-time change

Calculate the time-share percentage and overnight percentage that each parent has with the child

Use the time-share percentage as a better measure to calculate child support

Add in stipulations (you can choose from the ones provided in the program or make your own) that accompany the agreement

Create and print off the actual agreement to present to the court, mediation, your lawyer, and your ex

Print and make changes and adjustments to the schedule long after your court case is final

There many more features and benefits to using the software. You can try it out for free if you download the free edition of Custody X Change.

How can Custody X Change help me with my custody battle?

Custody X Change makes it really easy to work with your child's other parent. It makes the process a lot more objective because you will be dealing with a document instead of each other.

You can use Custody X Change to make your custody arrangements and child visitation schedule. Then you can print out a copy and give it to the other parent.

The other parent can review the plan and write down any changes he or she would like to make which you can later review and consider. It is real easy to make changes with the software.

During this whole process you can use the time share percentage to know exactly how much time each of you will have with the child.

You will have a physical calendar to look at which will make it easier to plan holidays fairly.

Since the program is so easy to use, it takes a lot of frustration out when your ex wants to make a change to a schedule that you spent so much time on. You can plan an entire year out and make little adjustments to it easily.

Using Custody X Change can bring peace to your child custody battle.

What if the other parent refuses to agree and is unreasonable?

Custody X Change is still helpful in that situation. If you and your ex absolutely cannot agree on anything it is likely that you will be presenting your child custody cases in front of a judge.

In that case, a judge will review all of the relevant information and make all the decisions.

Imagine your ex on one side of the courtroom, with a couple of papers, and you on the other side with an incredibly organized parenting plan and detailed visitation schedule.

You each present your documents to the court.

Yours are neat and address all of the issues in a manner that is fair and written in your child's best interest. Your ex hands the bailiff papers saying why he or she should have full custody or maybe just makes a verbal plea.

Which do you think will impress the judge?

Custody X Change will enable you to create the kind of document the judge is more likely to adopt. You will be able to provide the judge with an option besides the old "standard" custody and visitation schedule.

The key to winning in court is to be prepared.

You can be victorious in your child custody battle with Custody X Change. Download the free edition today.

Custody X Change is software that makes it easy to document your situation and stay organized.