Category: Positive Psychology

I didn’t realise how much it does!
So many babies are induced, do we realise the impact of those early synthetic drugs could have on later addictive behaviour? Or C-sections where the baby’s head is stuck & needs to be pulled out quickly. Or the effect of the epidural on the baby’s wellbeing & birth recovery?

I have recently studied this topic area & discovered that the birth process leaves an imprint in our minds & energy field, albeit unconscious. A natural birth with time for skin to skin bonding is seen as the preferred option. The mother’s heart field entangles with the baby’s heart field to stabilise & fit together to create connection & bonding.…

By Pamela Harland, Counsellor MNZAC, Mentor-Supervisor , Matrix Reimprinting Practitioner in the Bay of Islands, Northland (this article was written for Counselling Today NZAC September 2017 for counselling professionals) We are living in a quick-fix, app driven social media society today. Clients are getting more au fait with therapy in its various models & techniques. …

I was reading a lovely blog from Tiny Buddha on embracing your inner life coach & reflected on just how much popular psychology over the last 20 years or so has been driven by individuality, personal power. Its all about ME – yeah right- not! More than anything else, these times are demonstrating that we…

“NEF is an independent think-and-do tank that inspires and demonstrates real economic well-being. We aim to improve quality of life by promoting innovative solutions that challenge mainstream thinking on economic, environmental and social issues. We work in partnership and put people and the planet first.”

Professor Lord Richard Layard, November 2008

NEF used 2 components in their comprehensive research of wellbeing personal & social wellbeing. Denmark was top scorer for personal & social wellbeing. I wonder how NZ would shape up in comparison.

Trust is a very special commodity.

Yet we live in a world full of low-trust & suspicion. The emerging streams of newsfeed fill our waking lives with examples of discrepancies, dishonesty, ulterior motives, not- so-hidden agendas, personal gains, neglectful practice & backhanders which feeds us with low-trust. So who can we trust? And how? I was always told that there’s no such thing as automatic trust, you have to earn it!

Getting savvy to our own psychological trusting makeup helps us to see through the mist & smokescreens of good relating with others. Personal relationships, romantic relationships, work relationships all demand a level of receptivity & scrutiny from our trust monitor. Our radar of previous hurts, childhood wounds, experiences of having our trust broken is on the look- out for indicators & first whiff of something fishy, our self-preservation armour clunks into place. We are full of so many downloaded mis-trust messages in our psychological inner world – “don’t talk to strangers”, “be careful, the world is not a safe place”, “ people are only nice to you because they want something”

Has our technology — our cell phones and iPods and cameras — stopped us from dreaming? Young artist Shilo Shiv Suleman says no, as she demos “Khoya,” her new storybook for iPad, which floats us through a magical world in 7 minutes of pure creativity. I was mesmerised by the interactive storytelling on the iPad…

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us most. As you let your light shine, you unconsciously give others permission to do the same, Liberated from your fear, your presence liberates others. Nelson Mandela’s inaugural speech 1994

on supporting mental health in the workplace. In 2011, they commissioned YouGov to survey over 2000 employees to identify their experiences & attitudes about the degree of mental health at work. 26% reported mental health difficulties, with women higher than men. Rates were also higher in the 35 to 44 year age group.

I was enjoying walking by the ocean, golden sands, gentle lapping waves, emerald-azure waters, I could be feeling absolutely amazing or I could be lost within my dark thoughts. Then I was contemplating what does the internal landscape really look like & how do we take care of ourselves. Maintaining a feel-good factor is quite an art, even an ongoing okayness can be tricky. Our runaway thoughts are compelling & addictive as they fuel the epic 3D stories & tales – current & past.

Before we can say Jack Robinson (and who the hell was he anyway?) we have entered the dragon’s lair, fears, anxieties, self-recriminations, resentments emerge from the dragon’s fire & we spiral down. So many of our feelings especially anxieties, reside in the gut /sacral centre, yet somewhere within us we have the capacity to ease this fire & nurture ourselves, when we start to feel bad.

4 easy steps to self-nurture

Have you ever wondered why it is that some work interactions and events can trigger big emotional responses such as over-reactions, misunderstandings, injustices, defensiveness or emotional shut down, retaliations?

From my client work through EAP schemes over the years I am amazed at the amount of bullying that exists in organisations – hierarchical, horizontal, group peer pressure & so on. I wonder why it is becoming so common place when we all have the right to a nurturing and supportive organisational culture instead of one which is harmful & anxious.

I found December’s HRINZ meeting with Laura Crawshaw, Boss Whispering Institute – Intervening With Abrasive Leaders, very interesting in its perspective of providing group feedback to the ‘bully’ focused on interpersonal behaviour that causes emotional distress in coworkers sufficient to disrupt the organisational functioning, without the need for formal investigations & defences. see http://www.bosswhispering.com/

For coworkers who find themselves in a difficult relationship environment or victim mode, there is a better way to be – develop the inner super-visor.