“This has been a great run by some great kids,” said Propst. “There are probably only two other schools in the country (De la Salle, Calif., and Independence, N.C.) that have accomplished more than these seniors in high school football. Everybody brings the ‘A’ game when they play us, and these kids withstood the pressure well.”

We disagree. No one has accomplished more for awful teenage hair over the last four years than the Hoover Bucs.

The second thing we learned is that Hoover High School is completely hate-able. Who wants to root for the rich, white school with the psychotic coach? The Baker is our resident expert on Alabama, but I have to bring this up. Since when is staying in a hotel the night before a big game is a usual activity for high school football teams? This brings us to our belated point: no one would care about Hoover that much if it wasn’t for the show. Well, except for the entire state of Alabama (do they really count?).

This is exactly why Rush Propst should be the next head football coach at the University of Alabama. But only if they get their own reality show too. We have to watch him talking himself up and yelling at his players about how he’ll tell NFL scouts they’re no good after a loss. And let’s face it, even at Hoover, he’s still the best football coach at any level in Alabama. So what if he’s a nut and his players are terrified of him? There’s a guy that coaches basketball at Texas Tech who has made a career out of scaring players. Yeah, I went there. So join the bandwagon and donate to www.hirerushpropst.com* today!

*Disclaimer: website does not actually exist. Even if it did, if you sent us money we’d just use it to buy “The Departed” and Season 4 of “The Wire” on DVD.