Time to stock up on these GOP gifts now -- for Christmas in July -- or for Christmas in December! Or to be honest, for Christmas in any month because Donald Trump is going to sign an Executive Order commanding that Christmas be honored with a year-round celebration! Fa la la la la.

THIS IS PART 2 OF OUR GIFT CAVALCADE. SCROLL DOWN TO SEE OUR WONDERFUL OFFERINGS. THEN, TO SEE THE GIFTS PRESENTED IN PART 1, CLICK HERE.

1. KELLYANNE CONWAY'S COVER-UP

The guys and the gals at the White House swear by Kellyanne Conway's "Cover-Up."

"You know the president makes fake promises," said Sean Spicer, "so when the luster begins to fade, Kellyanne slathers on the cover-up. It works miracles. She can make the ugliest truth look like a beautiful alternative reality."

2. IVANKA TRUMP BFF BRACELETS

If you find that you'll be separated from a loved one -- say, for eight to ten years or more -- get Ivanka's "BFF Bracelets" -- the perfect way to let your BFF know you won't forget him.

3. PAUL RYAN'S BONELESS CHICKEN PADDIES

GOP chickens have no backbones so they're extra tender, and they make the perfect gift for friends who are absolutely spineless when it comes to holding Trump accountable for anything.

4. JEFF ON THE SHE'F

You've heard of the Elf on the Shelf? Well, now there's Jeff on the She'f.

Put Jeff on any She'f, and the built-in cameras in his eyes will watch over any and all bad hombres in the house. If necessary, he'll send electronic directives to the local police department to report to your home for seizures of cash and property.

​5. TRUMP WORLD RECORDS 2017

There are only two books better than theTrump World Records 2017: The Bible, andThe Art of the Deal.

Read all about the record-setting crowds at Trump's rallies and inauguration; the very best words he uses; the most embarrassing moments with world leaders and their spouses; and more!

6. TRUMP-BRAND FIRE RETARDANT PANTS

Liars can lie through their teeth, spread fake news, and report false facts, and do so in complete comfort -- and without a worry or a care -- when they wear Trump-brand fire retardant pants!

​7. MOTHER PENCE DOLL

Your child will give up all other dolls for play-time with Mother Pence! The Cabbage dolls, the American Girl dolls, the Disney dolls, the Barbies -- and even the Ken dolls -- they'll all stay in the toybox. Your child won't want to be in the room alone with them -- unless Mother Pence is present!

​8. TRUMP-BRAND CARDBOARD COFFINS

Trump & the GOP are determined to kick people off helath care -- so there is no better time to purchase a Trump-brand cardboard coffin. The current GOP strategy is "Repeal and Recoil" -- so it won't be long until Trump's Death-care is here!

9. Trump Handbaskets

You know where you're going -- and you'll be going in style -- when you're transported in a Trump-brand handbasket!

10. ANTI-CYBER BULLYING POSTER

Melania's anti-cyber-bullying campaign ended before it even started. "Nobody knew cyber-bullying could be so complicated," said the First Lady, so she has decided to more on to a new campaign: legitimizing pole dancing. "Pole dancers are so misunderstood in today's political climate," she said.

As a result of this change in direction, we literally have hundreds of thousands of posters from Melania's rejected ACB campaign.

Time to stock up on these GOP gifts now -- for Christmas in July -- or for Christmas in December! Or to be honest, for Christmas in any month because Donald Trump is going to sign an Executive Order commanding that Christmas be honored with a year-round celebration! Fa la la la la.

​1. TIME MAGAZINE COVER

Get your picture on a true-to-life Time Magazine cover! Put any picture you want with any caption -- say your the President of the United States or the Golfer-of-the-Year! Make up honors, awards and tributes. For example, say that you're the recipient of a Purple Heart! A fun gift for every member of the family.

​2. PERSONALIZED INVITATION FOR TWO TO TRUMP'S IMPEACHMENT

Your souvenir ticket to Trump's Impeachment for front & center seats will be suitable for framing!

​3. IVANKA TRUMP'S PRISON GARB

In recent months, Ivanka Trump has identified a void in the fashion space. Recognizing the absence of a brand that addressed the needs of the modern politician, she now offers trendy apparel and accessories in prison garb!

4. RUSSIAN FOR GOP CANDIDATES

Learn to collude with an enemy nation for personal gain by mastering Russian! Learn the Russian alphabet and basic conversational phrases about setting up clandestine meetings with the crown prosecutor of Russia, sharing very high level and sensitive information, and dismissing any talk about adoption policies and pesky orphans.

"I love it," said Donald J. Trump Junior.

​5. PERJUR-EASE

Do you stress about telling the truth -- especially when under oath? Don't give the truth a second thought -- and lie in comfort with Perjur-EASE, the tablets for tale-telling approved by U.S. Confederate General Jeffery Beauregard Sessions!

Do fast talking city slickers in the senate make you nervous? Calm your nerves with Perjur-EASE -- and you'll be able to lie through your teeth like Mike Pence without even batting an eye!

The GOP has mastered how to rewrite voting district boundaries. voting laws to suppress the vote, and historical facts. Now they're rewriting the dictionary! Don't let your kids fall behind!

​7. GERRYMANDER-O-GRAPH

Do you have a future GOP politician in the family? Then get Kenner's new Gerrymander-O-Graph! Your children will be drawing and manipulating complex and confusing voting district borders to favor the GOP in no time!

8. DON JR's MORAL COMPASS

Have a problem lying in public? Can't seem to swindle a friend or a business associate? Feel guilty when you contact enemies of the state? Fret not!

You can lie, cheat, swindle and commit treason like a seasoned GOP pro with Donald J. Trump Jr's Moral Compass.

9. MITCH McCONNEL'S HOME HEALTHCARE SYSTEM

Who needs healthcare when you have Mitch McConnell's Home Healthcare System.

Is someone in the family complaining about an ache or a pain? No worries! You'll be sawing off limbs in no time!

​Bandage wraps and pain killers not included.

​10. TRUMP UNIVERSITY DIPLOMA

We have hundreds of thousands of these things, and they aren't worth the paper their printed on, so talk about a great gag-gift for friends and family -- just fill in names and the type of the degree -- and voila -- you have a Trump U. degree!

​BONUS BUY: TRUMP-BRAND CHRISTMAS COAL

President Trump promised to get the coal miners back to work, and they're now digging away in West Virginia to provide little red MCGA bags of coal -- just in time for Christmas!

Who's in line to get some coal? Don Jr is sure to get a bag or two! So will Jared Kushner, Paul Manafort, Jeff Sessions, Mike Flynn, Marc Kasowitz, Steve Bannon, Kellyanne Conway, Sean Spicer, and Sarah Sanders Huckabee.