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What Am I Even Doing? (Monthly Wrap-Up + Camp NaNo)

March was... *awkward chuckle* Not the best (productivity-wise). Or, at least, it felt that way. The last couple weeks have been confusing, if I may be honest. I have been questioning pretty much everything. Which has consisted of me asking myself this question, over and over again:

What am I even doing?

It's a confusing time in my life at the moment. I have so much I need to figure out, so much I don't even know how to figure out... And it all feels overwhelming. All my goals kind of just plummeted and at some point, it all just seemed... pointless.

Which stinks because I want this to be a positive community.

But I'm not perfect and not every day is going to be productive. So, I think I just have a lot more figuring out to do... *cliche eye roll* I guess I put pressure on myself. I look at all these amazing things that everyone is accomplishing and it makes me feel like: oh, I should be doing this and this NOW. I don't mean to sound like I am complaining. Of course, that is not my intention. The reason why I express these feelings to you is because I like to be honest with you. And I like being able to reach out just in case someone else feels the same way.

I was talking to my beautiful friend, Anna, and she gave me some advice that I would like to share with you.

You are still young (no matter how old you are). Everything will fall into place. It might not work out the way you want it to but it might just work out better.

So, sometimes life doesn't go as planned and you might fail, but whatever does happen... there will be some sort of positivity that comes out of it. You just have to look for it.

And that's what I am going to do right now. Without further ado... Let's do this.

WHAT I READ

This month was actually pretty good for reading, if I may say so myself. ;) I did end up re-reading two books but it was so worth it.

Carry On by Rainbow Rowell

If you asked me what my favorite book is, I'd probably lie and say something like "I don't have a favorite" when, in reality, I'm mentally chanting "Carry On!".

*giggles like a kid on Christmas* Hehe, yeah... I read it again and loved it even more. Who knew that was even possible?? I am shamefully not ashamed.

Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli

You all probably already know from my previous blog post that I read Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda again before going to see the movie and I loved it all the same! It was interesting to read it knowing who Blue is because then I could point out all the times Simon was so clueless. It's great.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz

My lovely friend,Sarah, sent me this book and I am SO THANKFUL THAT SHE DID because I wasn't planning on reading this anytime soon. And allow me to say that it was so good.

You can read my goodreads review on it if you want to know a more in-depth reaction but I will say that this book made my heart ache in the most beautiful way. It was a deeper read, but in a good way. I loved it so much. I highly recommend it.

*is eagerly waiting for the sequel to come out*

Runaways issue #6 and #7

This is the first comic series that I am reading and so far I am enjoying it very much. (And so not because Rainbow Rowell is writing it. Pft. I don't have favorites. She said, her voice high and eyes, darting like crazy.)

WHAT I WATCHED

Love, Simon

Cannot. Talk. About. This. Movie. Enough. It was perfection. The cast and everything. Even the experience going to see it was breathtaking. I want need to go see it again and again and again.

I think I'm going for round 2 this week. I'm probably going to cry. Again. BUT I DON'T CARE BECAUSE:

1. Nick Robinson is the most awkward, adorable, beautiful human to exist. I'm not even going to deny that I love him.

And he is Simon.

2. I am also not going to deny that Keiynan Lonsdale is an absolute CUTIE.

That smile. I die.

47 Meters Down

Literally about two girls doing it for the 'gram. Did they not notice that the boat was super rusty??

When Calls The Heart

I've watched all the seasons so now I am caught up and I think I ship Bill and Abigail.

WHAT I LISTENED TO

Well, I'm so happy you asked because throughout the past month I listened to:

...Simon has really good music taste, okay?? Yeah, I'll shut up now. (Links are included, by the way.)

WHAT I WROTE

I wrote a blog post over at Coffee and Wisdom about Agatha Christie and her play, The Mousetrap. I'll be posting over there quite frequently so you should definitely check it out. ;)

I also worked on my short story some more but I recently hit a writing rut and I am currently pounding my head against a wall. (Not really but very close to.)

I am hoping that Camp NaNo will inspire me to get over this bump in the road. Which reminds me...

I am doing Camp NaNo!

I decided to do it at the very last second. I have never participated before but I am eager to see what it is like. I am not even prepared but who cares. (I do but it's whatever.) I even got assigned a cabin?? It feels like I'm actually at camp! Which is cool because... I've never been to camp.

Anyways. I'm not really putting a lot of pressure on myself to do it but I am using this as a chance to finally finish my short story and maybe GET OUT OF THIS UGLY WRITING RUT.

Are you doing Camp NaNo? If so, what is your goal? I want to hear all about your project!

WHAT'S IN THE UP & UP

I should really be more prepared and take notes before I do these posts because now I am forgetting absolutely everything that happened in March. *grabs phone and looks through photos to see if it triggers any trace of memory*

Oh! Okay... I do have a few things to share. ;)

Spring cleaning!

I've been cleaning like a mad woman. I gutted my room and rearranged it. Including my mountain of books.

I also got rid of my desk because 1. my chair broke, and 2. it was too small anyway. So, I'm deskless but I might be getting bookshelves, which has been my dream since I fell in love with books.

I had oreo waffles!

And allow me to say that they were heavenly.

I won another goodreads giveaway!

I actually won it in December but the book didn't arrvive until... four months later. It's okay though because FREE BOOKS ARE AMAZING.

It's called Meet Cute and it is an anthology of cute stories by a bunch of authors, including Nina LaCour and Nicola Yoon! I'm thinking of maybe doing a review on it? LET ME KNOW IF I SHOULD.

It was Easter and I wore a yellow dress that my sister got for me.

Despite it having been 30 degrees.

I GOT AN ARC FOR WORLDS BENEATH!

The amazing Kate asked me if I would be interested in reading her second book to The Blood Race series and OF COURSE I SAID YES. I read an arc of The Blood Race last year and devoured it, so I am totally pumped to read this. I'm almost a hundred pages into it and YOU GUYS. You guys. You guys. It's been so worth the wait. I can't wait to review this book.

I've been working on my college applications.

I recently received some good news from a college of my choice. However, much of what I said above, actually, is related to the topic of "college". (It's a scary topic, in my opinion.)

I basically have the fate of my whole life in the palm of my hands and dude, I think that's freaking terrifying.

TALK TO ME!

Wow. This was a crazy, jumbled up post. I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE IF YOU READ THAT AND ALSO THANK YOU FOR MAKING IT THUS FAR. You're the best. SO HOW WAS YOUR MARCH?? Are you excited for April? DO YOU HAVE SPRING FEVER BECAUSE I DO! I desperately want to be at a beach right now. Like, I am aching to go. So, if anyone is going, please kidnap me and take me with you THANKS.

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I'm so sorry you've been feeling so unproductive this month. I hope April is filled with productivity and so much purpose finding! I've been feeling all that too, and this post was really encouraging and relatable. I totally understand if you need to rant about it!Also I am such a huge fan of spring cleaning!Happy April!!

Thank you so much for your kind words. It truly means a lot to me. <3 I am happy to hear that you were able to relate to this post and that you found it encouraging. If you ever need to rant or vent or just voice out your feelings, I'm always here. ^-^ Yess, spring cleaning is so nice! It gives you a chance to start out fresh and (don't mind the pun) clean.

Your book piles just look amazing. �� And I have yet to read the book Love, Simon is based on; is it good? I mean, there's a lot of hype, so I'm not sure. (That sounds backwards. But the last time something was hyped - Thor Ragnorok - and I watched it, I was super disapointed. *shudder*)

EEEEEEP, thank you girly! <3 And I absolutely know what you mean! Actually, you aren't the only one with that same opinion. My brother thinks that the movie, Thor Ragnorok, was overhyped. He said that he likes the movie but he just didn't think it was "the best Marvel movie ever". I have not seen it but I do think a lot of Marvel movies can overhyped. o-o

So, with that said, I do not think this movie/book is overhyped in any way. I definitely think you would enjoy the book very much. It is SO so so good. I couldn't stop smiling while reading. It's worth giving it a shot. :)

March has gone by so fast! It's hard to believe it's April! Just found your blog! I like the name. How did you come up with the name paper pizza?? Recently, I started a blog of my own and would love it if you stopped by!-Brooklyne bensshowersofblessings.blogspot.com P.S. I'm homeschooled too!! :-)

Eeep, thank you so much! <3 I just really love pizza... (and making art). I can't take full credit for the name creation but it definitely suits me. :} EEEEPPP welcome to the blogging world! I hope you are enjoying your stay. ;) I would love to check out your blog!

Thank you so much for stopping by and commenting! I loved hearing from you. <3

Super late to the comment party, because you know…I comment on Sundays only. Ops.

I relate to this question A LOT. I probably ask myself at least once a week: "What the heck am I even doing with my life? Cause it's not half of what I am thinking in my head." Anna's advice is good advice, though. The equivalent to: chill out because you're still young and you don't have to have it all figured out yet. *nods* Good advice.

Moving on...

1. Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe sounds so good! And the cover is gorgeous. *adds to my list*

2. Best wishes on your Camp NaNo project! I'm not participating, but I am working on a novel I need to finish because I have procrastinated for too long, and it needs to be finished.

3. Ahhh, I seriously cannot wait to read Worlds Beneath! I devoured The Blood Race, and I'm so excited to see where Kate takes the characters next.

No need to be sorry! I should probably take note and figure out which day(s) work best for me to comment on blogs. I seem to do it only occasionally but I'd really like to stick to it, you know?

YES, exactly! To be honest, I probably ask myself that more than once a day. o-o It's so hard to figure out your life when you have this image of it inside your head... Yes, Anna is a very wise soul. <3

1. YES. The writing is so beautiful. <3

2. Thank you so much! I know exactly how you feel. Best of luck on your project! I hope I am able to read it someday. :)

3. GIRL. I AM SERIOUSLY DYING OVER IT. It is definitely going to be one of your favorites. <3 ;)

I hope you are feeling amazing because you are an amazing person. Thank you for all your kind words, they mean the world to me. <3