I work in a very matrixed organization. My actual boss works remotely and I seldom interact with him one-on-one, but we have a team lead on every project.

In my work group, we all work on different projects as they come in. One of my peers in another group is causing real problems for me. He never keeps his agreements and tends to hold up every project he is involved with. I’ll call him B.

He agrees to his role and then makes excuses, but no one in charge seems to know or care. It isn’t my job to give B feedback—and I wouldn’t know what to say—but it’s getting to the point that everyone in my group tries to avoid working with whatever group he is in.

I was just invited to be on a really fun and interesting project that I said yes to, but I heard B will be on it. I have a good relationship with that team lead, and I’m thinking of giving him the heads up about the chaos B causes.

What do you think? I hate to tattle, but I also hate knowing what’s going to happen and doing nothing.

Tattler

Dear Tattler,

This sounds like mayhem. The only way the matrix can work is if there is some solid oversight and everyone can be trusted to pull their weight. The fact that you are having this conundrum is an indication of poor leadership—because sometimes if everyone is a leader, no one actually has to step up and take responsibility. There’s a lot to be gained in terms of nimbleness and creativity with matrix organizing principles, but this is a classic example of one the potential downsides.

I understand this doesn’t really help you.

This might: Think about your basic values. What you are reacting to is the general unfairness of the situations caused by B. Unfairness essentially reduces all of us to four-year-olds. It literally affects brain function. It is important to be aware of this so that you don’t do something that is not aligned with your values and that you may regret. You may think that reporting someone’s past bad behaviors to an authority is the right thing to do, but your choice of label for yourself – “tattler”—indicates that you would judge yourself poorly. Frankly, you seem to be judging yourself for even thinking about it.

I sense some real doubts there, which leads me to say: don’t do it. I’m not sure what you would have to gain, but you definitely would have the respect of the team lead to lose. Because, as you well know, nobody likes a tattle tale.

Here’s what you can do. As the assignments are being divvied up, ask the group what the consequences are for slipping on deadlines. Agree as a group how you will behave. Keep your own commitments and acknowledge when others keep theirs. The first time B shows up with an excuse, call out that his lateness is going to slow everyone down and refer back to original agreements of the group. If the group doesn’t step up, then you can talk to the team lead and mention it isn’t the first time you have seen this behavior from B. You don’t have to be mean about it, just truthful and factual. Then it is the team lead’s problem.

Also, I would recommend that you make it a priority to develop a relationship with your actual boss. He is probably so busy that he figures no news is good news and that if you needed him, he’d hear about it. But you don’t want to be in touch only when there is a problem.

In my world view, it is your boss’s job to know his people and make sure they have what they need to succeed—but since that isn’t happening, you need to step up and be on his radar. Get on his calendar and be prepared with a list of all your projects so that he knows who you are and what you’re up to. To the extent possible, research his goals and priorities and ways you might be able to help him. Maybe then, when you really need his influence, he’ll have your back.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I work for a small company in a small city. I really like my job, but the atmosphere in my office is so toxic I am not sure I can live with it.

This is my first real job. My immediate boss took me under his wing, taught me the business, and he has my back. He is not without his flaws, but I have made my peace with them and I appreciate everything he has done for me. His boss is the owner of the company—a great guy who hired me and gave me a chance.

The problem is that each man trash talks the other one when the other one leaves the office. Our space isn’t very big—just an office manager and eight or ten guys at any given time—so everybody hears it. Then, when the absent one comes in, it is all “Hey, how are you?”—buddy buddy.

It is weird and off putting. Is this normal office behavior? Should I try talking to my boss? If so, what should I say?

I wish I had pithy words for you, but frankly I think both your boss and his boss are unprofessional and immature and would not respond well to your feedback. In the rough-and-tumble atmosphere of your office, you could always drop a hint like “Hey, I am going to get some lunch—don’t talk trash about me while I am gone.”

On the other hand, you really don’t want to be stooping to the middle-school behavior of your supposed betters.

One option is to take your newfound valuable experience and go search out a better work environment. Of course, they will both say terrible things about you when you are gone, but who cares?

Another option is to just roll with it. It seems to fit with the good-old-boy-type culture of the office and probably doesn’t mean anything. You can just observe, let it roll off your back, and remember it when you think about the culture you want to have in in your next job and the culture you want to create when you are the boss.

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2019/05/18/bosses-are-trash-talking-each-other-ask-madeleine/feed/212680Not Sure Where to Start in a New Senior Role? Ask Madeleinehttps://leaderchat.org/2019/05/11/not-sure-where-to-start-in-a-new-senior-role-ask-madeleine/
https://leaderchat.org/2019/05/11/not-sure-where-to-start-in-a-new-senior-role-ask-madeleine/#commentsSat, 11 May 2019 12:31:35 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=12666

Dear Madeleine,

About three months ago, I was promoted to COO in my organization. I wasn’t expecting it—a lot of changes happened at once. A large group of people were fired and the next thing I knew I was COO.

I have no real senior leadership experience, but here is the crazy thing: I’m pretty sure I can do this. I’m super organized and I have an exhaustive knowledge of the mechanics of the organization. My problem is that when I try to prioritize on what to tackle first, I get completely overwhelmed. I’m not sure where to start.

I thought about asking my new team, but they seem as mystified as I am about what I’m doing in this role. I really don’t want to reveal my ignorance to them but at the same time I don’t want my boss to lose faith in me. Any ideas would be helpful.

Unexpected Success

Dear Unexpected Success,

It’s obvious your boss also thinks you can do this—so you should absolutely play hard, and play to win. You have some leadership experience and you will figure out the senior part. You have nothing to lose.

Thomas Leonard, my mentor and a pioneer of the coaching profession, says, “Anything worth doing is worth getting help with.” The first order of business is to get help. The fastest way to bomb out would be for you to try to do too much, too fast, all by yourself. Do you have anyone from your past work life you might call to mentor you? Are there any COOs in your industry you could reach out to for advice? I suggest you hire a very experienced executive coach—someone with whom you can discuss everything you need to work through in total confidentiality. Your organization will probably pay for it. Also, lobby for an assistant to help manage your time and keep you focused. The more support you can get for yourself right now, the better off you will be.

Sit down with your boss and ask them to outline your top three to five priorities. Decide what you can do in what time frame and check it in writing with your boss so there is no misunderstanding. Focus only on your boss’s priorities and on building support for your leadership.

To succeed as a leader you need your team to trust you. Begin by spending what will feel like precious time getting to know each member of your team so that you can understand their strengths, experience, and expertise. The more you can empower them with crystal-clear goals to lead their own teams, the more you will be able to get done. Build trust and connectivity with your team by creating and sharing your Leadership Point of View.

You also need to understand your peers and your unofficial influencers in the organization. Create a relationship map to identify all of the critical players in your organization, and make a concerted effort to get to know them and understand their goals. Build a coalition of support by helping others achieve their goals and leveraging their help to achieve yours.

Once you have some clarity about your priorities, are moving toward your goals, and have started to build your network of support, then you can worry about building your own strategic point of view and influencing as a strategic leader. That day will come after your very high functioning operational machine is built.

You have a rare opportunity to take advantage of an odd situation. If you can keep your wits about you, get the right help, and stay grounded, you will be fine. Better than fine—great!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I am a senior executive with a lot of experience who is on the leadership team of my organization. I have a problem I’ve never had before, which has been developing over the last year.

Since we got a new CEO (my new boss), there has been a lot of turnover on the leadership team including three new leaders who have come in from the outside. They are all young and extremely confident (read: arrogant and brash). The problem is that, somehow, I seem to have lost my voice.

No one on this new leadership team seems to be listening to me when I do manage to get a word in edgewise. Here’s a typical scenario: I say something and no one pays attention. Ten minutes later someone else says basically the same thing and everyone—my new boss, in particular—agrees with the other person and remarks on what a good idea that was.

I know I need to somehow change my MO because I am doing something that isn’t working. But I don’t know where to start. I am afraid all the ideas I have for speaking up will make me come across as whiny or needy, and I really don’t want that.

Lost My Voice

Dear Lost My Voice,

It seems that something essential has shifted: your voice has always been heard and respected and, all of sudden, it’s not. You haven’t changed but your environment has. So it is you—but only in that you haven’t adapted to your new environment. Yet.

Here are some questions: What was going on in the former team environment? I presume you had a longstanding relationship with your old boss? You had a track record with the other members? The meetings were run differently? I have no way of knowing, but you do. Identify what is different and analyze how you might close the gap. Some ideas:

Talk to the CEO about your concerns and ask for support in holding the space when you speak and acknowledging what you say. They probably have no idea that they are bowing to the loudest and most aggressive voices.

Develop one-on-one relationships with the new members of the team. Go to lunch, have coffee, meet about specific projects, ask for their help with your goals, offer to help with theirs. Once the new people begin to see you as a human being, they will be more likely to show respect.

Don’t let people interrupt you. The only reason people get good at shutting down interruptions is that they have to. In your past team meetings you probably didn’t have to, but now you do. When someone interrupts, hold your hand up and say, “I’m not finished,” or “Please wait until I finish,” or simply “Hold on.” Watch the others—I’ll bet they do that all the time. People will only interrupt you if you let them.

Formulate your ideas so that when you do speak, you are brief, clear, and direct. Use a volume slightly above what you are used to using—and if you are female, make sure you keep your voice in the lower register.

If someone repeats an idea you just shared, and now all of sudden it’s heard, you have a clear example that you can discuss with your boss. Ask your boss after the meeting what you are doing that causes others’ voices to be heard, but not yours. The feedback might help you to use more effective language—you might learn something useful.

The thing you really don’t want to do is lose confidence and stop trying. Don’t take the bad behavior personally, because it probably isn’t personal. Sit up straight, look people in the eye, prepare for the meetings so you can be bold and succinct, and don’t give up. It might take a long time. It took time for you to be comfortable with your old team and it will take a while for this one to gel. Keep at it. You haven’t lost your voice—you’ve just misplaced it. So get it back.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I am so frustrated with myself. At the beginning of the year I set a whole bunch of goals. Then Q1 whooshed by and guess what I have done? Nothing. I stayed really focused for about two weeks and then forgot all about my resolutions.

One of my big goals was to have regular one on ones with everyone on my team, and it just isn’t happening. Something always seems to get in the way.

I feel like such a loser. I am never going to be the manager I want to be. I am racing around like a squirrel and everything seems like the most important nut. How can I reset and be successful?

Need to Try Again

Need to Try Again,

I love your metaphor. I can really relate! I’m so sorry you feel like a loser, though. I can sense the downward spiral you’re in.

The first order of business is to reverse the spiral so you can start thinking straight and get yourself back on track. To do this, make a quick list of every way you are winning—things you’re doing well, projects that are going according to plan, tasks you’re great at, goals you’re reaching, goals your direct reports are achieving. I’ll bet it’s a decent list.

The main reason you feel terrible is that you aren’t winning at some new goals. Just ponder on that for a moment. Then, if you’re still feeling like a loser, add to the list all the things you’re grateful for. It will literally change your brain chemistry.

Now let’s take a look at those new goals. How many are there? I’ll bet you an acorn you have too many. The number two reason people don’t achieve their goals is that they have too many of them. The number one reason is that they set unspecific, unclear goals.

I challenge you to choose one goal. Only one. Let’s go ahead and choose having regular one on ones with your people, since you brought it up. You may decide to choose something else on your list, but you can use this thought process.

Ask yourself: What is driving your desire to do this? What makes it important right now? Are you sure your people even want one-on-one meetings with you? What will the benefit be for them? For you? Decide for yourself what a good job looks like—how will you know you’re successful?

Then get support—who can help you with this? The obvious choice for this is your people. Ask your direct reports to take responsibility for their own one on ones. They can each put their own regular time on your calendar or otherwise make sure the meeting gets scheduled.

Finally, once you decide you’re going to commit, then really commit. Once the one on ones are scheduled, they are sacred. Nothing gets scheduled over them. (Okay, we all know that probably isn’t going to work, but you make sure the meeting gets rescheduled.) If you schedule them for every week, nobody will mind if you end up having to miss one, or even two. Then at least your people get two one on ones in a 30-day period, which maybe isn’t ideal but it isn’t bad—and it’s a lot better than none.

Take 7 minutes at the beginning and the end of each week and review your calendar to make sure those one on ones are there, and move them if needed. If you start feeling overwhelmed, remind yourself of why you decided to schedule them in the first place.

Now you can see how much work it is just to get on track with one thing—and you had a whole laundry list! No wonder it didn’t work. Get one thing nailed down, whatever it is. Get it into your daily actions, and at a certain point you will not be able to remember a time when you didn’t do it. Then you can add something else.

Calm down, take three deep breaths and choose. One thing. You can do this.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2019/04/27/behind-on-your-2019-goals-and-feel-like-a-loser-ask-madeleine/feed/1126384 Steps to Escape From Your Leadership Prison Cellhttps://leaderchat.org/2019/04/25/4-steps-to-escape-from-your-leadership-prison-cell/
https://leaderchat.org/2019/04/25/4-steps-to-escape-from-your-leadership-prison-cell/#respondThu, 25 Apr 2019 12:30:19 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=12633I recently spent time at Alcatraz…as a tourist, of course. The old federal penitentiary hasn’t housed prisoners since 1963. As a history nerd it was fascinating to walk the same halls as some of the world’s most famous criminals like Al Capone, Machine Gun Kelly, and Robert Stroud, the “birdman” of Alcatraz.

Some of the prison cell doors are open so you can walk inside and get a sense for what it must have felt like to be confined in such a small space. The cells are five feet wide, seven feet tall, and nine feet long. I could reach my arms out to the side and place my palms on the walls of the cell. The concrete walls hold the frigid chill of the San Francisco Bay and the steel doors are hard and unforgiving. It’s difficult to imagine what it must have felt like to be confined in such a small space for hours on end, day after day, year after year.

Prison cells aren’t just concrete rooms with steel doors; they can be rooms of our own making. (click to tweet) All of us, in various areas of our lives, have constructed cells that imprison us and constrain our ability to experience true freedom and joy.

In the realm of leadership, some of us are career criminals doing hard time and the only life we know is within the four walls of our prison cell. These leaders are guilty of crimes like wielding power as a weapon, hoarding information, sucking up to the hierarchy, micromanaging, breaking trust, playing politics, and over-reliance on command and control styles of leadership. Most of us leaders aren’t hardened criminals serving a life sentence, but we dabble in our share of petty theft that puts us behind bars from time to time.

There are ways you can escape from the prison of ineffective leadership practices, but it takes planning, patience, and perseverance. You didn’t build those walls overnight and it’s going to take time to tunnel your way out. Here are four steps to break out of your leadership prison cell:

Discover Your Leadership Purpose

Why do you lead? Answer that question and you’ve discovered your leadership purpose. Discovering your leadership purpose is an introspective process that takes time and effort, but the result is an internal clarity and drive that inspires and fuels your work as a leader.

The process for discovering your leadership purpose begins with reflecting on your own leadership role models. How did those people influence you? What about the way they led others inspired you? What did you learn from them and how do you display that in your own leadership style? Second, how does your leadership connect with your larger life purpose? Do you see your role as a leader integrated with your overall life purpose? Are you clear on your greatest strengths and how you can use them to positively impact the world around you? Third, what is the legacy you want to leave? How do you want to be remembered for the way you influenced those you lead?

As you wrestle with these tough questions, you’ll eventually gain insight into your leadership purpose. Writing a simple purpose statement will help crystallize your thoughts and provide a reminder of why you do what you do as a leader. Do an internet search for “writing a personal mission statement” and you’ll find dozens of excellent resources and templates. As an example, my purpose statement is To use my gifts and abilities to be a servant leader and a model of God’s grace and truth.

Define Your Leadership Values

Leadership is an influence process. As a leader you are trying to influence others to believe in certain things and act in specific ways. How can you do that if you aren’t clear on your own values? What drives your own behaviors? You have to be clear on that before you can expect to influence others…at least in a positive way.

In the absence of clearly defined values, I believe people tend to default to the more base, self-centered values we all possess: self-preservation, survival, ego, power, position. As an example, my core values are trust, authenticity, and respect. I look to those values to guide my interactions with others. Just as river banks channel and direct the flow of rushing water, so values direct our behaviors. What is a river without banks? A large puddle. Our leadership effectiveness is diffused without values to guide its efforts.

Declare Your Leadership Brand

Your brand image is not only how people perceive you (your reputation), but also what differentiates you from everyone else in your company. When your colleagues and team members think of you, what is it that comes to their minds?

Tom Peters, the guru of personal branding, says, “If you are going to be a brand, you’ve got to become relentlessly focused on what you do that adds value, what you’re proud of, and most important, what you can shamelessly take credit for.” Now, I’m not into shamelessly bragging about personal accomplishments, but I do think it’s important, and possible, to tactfully and appropriately share your successes.

Forget your job title. What is it about your performance as a leader that makes you memorable, distinct, or unique? What’s the “buzz” on you? Forget about your job description too. What accomplishments are you most proud of? How have you gone above, beyond, or outside the scope of your job description to add value to your organization? Those are the elements that make up your brand.

Deliver on Your Leadership Promise

If you’ve ever removed the cardboard sleeve on a Starbucks coffee cup, you may have noticed this statement printed on the side of the cup:

Our Barista Promise

Love your beverage or let us know. We’ll always make it right.

My experience with Starbucks is they live that promise. Whenever I’ve not been satisfied with my drink, they’ve always made it right.

Your leadership promise is the combination of your purpose, values, and brand. It’s who your people expect you to be as a leader and it’s how they expect you to behave. Whether you’ve articulated your leadership purpose, values, and brand to your people or not (which I strongly advocate you do), they have ascribed a leadership promise to you based on your past behavior. You are setting yourself up to break trust with your followers if their perception of your leadership promise doesn’t align with your own.

Escape from Alcatraz

It was simple for me to leave the island when my time was done on Alcatraz; I boarded the ferry and rode across the bay to San Francisco. It wasn’t nearly as easy for the prisoners who once called Alcatraz home. Likewise, it won’t be easy for you to escape your self-constructed prison cell of dysfunctional leadership practices, but it is doable with intentional focus and effort. Discovering your leadership purpose will direct your energies, clarifying your values will guide your activities, declaring your brand will let others know what you stand for, and delivering on your leadership promise will hold you accountable to being the leader you aspire to be and the leader your people need and deserve.

Randy Conley is the Vice President of Client Services and Trust Practice Leader at The Ken Blanchard Companies. His LeaderChat posts appear the fourth or last Thursday of every month. For more insights on trust and leadership, visit Randy at his Leading with Trust blog or follow him on Twitter @RandyConley.

What should I do about all of the requests I get from people who want to “pick my brain” or schedule an informational interview? My friends’ kids are all reaching the age where they are getting serious about having lucrative careers and satisfying jobs, and they’re all following the advice they’re getting to talk to people who have the jobs they think they might want some day. I have to be honest—I gave that advice to my own kid.

The problem is that if I said yes to all the young—and not-so-young—people who ask, I wouldn’t have time to do my actual job. I do have a great job. I’ve been lucky and worked hard. I don’t want to be a jerk, but one more request to have coffee will push me over the edge. How do other people handle this?

In Demand

Dear In Demand,

That’s a good question—and I had no idea how to answer it, so I asked around and did some Googling. The first thing that became clear is that the frustration is real and universal. Many report that it seems the folks who are requesting an informational interview are actually hoping you might be interested in hiring them or recommending them to someone else.

One woman I know who has a very cool job now does a 30-minute webinar once a month. When she gets a request, she just replies with an email or text invite with the date, time, and link for the next group call. She shares a couple of things that people might not know about her industry and then does Q&A. Sometimes she gets 3 people, and once she had upwards of 30. I thought that was a creative way to deal with way too many requests.

Most people I talked to came up with variations on putting the work back where it belongs—with the person making the request. Ask the requester to send you an email with their specific questions. Advise them to ask questions that they can’t get answered with a little bit of research. If enough people do this, and you write back enough answers, you can create an FAQ that you just respond with. To those who ask really insightful questions, you might offer a 15-minute phone call.

One very successful guy I know invites the interesting and insistent people to meet him at his local park to walk his two dogs with him at 5:00 a.m. That seems to really limit the field to those who are truly committed to a meeting!

You can’t be all things to all people, so you are right to set some boundaries and get a grip on this. Experiment with some of these ideas and find what works best for you. The people who are willing to meet you halfway and will be grateful and will self-select in, and those that are just checking a box will fall away.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Think of a time when you experienced truly excellent service. It may take you a few minutes—I don’t mind waiting.

Got it? Now compare that to a time when the service you received was just acceptable, but nothing special. Which organization do you want to do business with again? I’ll bet it’s the one where someone made you feel valued and cared for—someone who understood what great service really means.

What we know from working with companies of all sizes is that most organizations recognize that they need to offer great customer service—but few really get it right. They zero in on specific tactics or trendy catchphrases, or they provide training to a small number of people in customer service roles. They don’t understand that the best companies create a culture of Legendary Service—where taking care of customers is the responsibility of every person, not just people who work in the customer service department.

Organizations that have a true service culture look at customer service from three equally important perspectives:

Frontline service providers. Frontline people play a critical role because they are the ones who have direct contact with the customer. To the customer, these people are the company. If frontliners don’t know how to behave with a customer or how to answer a question or solve a problem, it can reflect badly on the organization in the customer’s eyes. On the other hand, if they serve customers with care, answer their questions, and solve problems on the spot, customers will happily return.

Managers. Managers in a true service culture empower frontline people to provide exemplary service. They also act as role models as they demonstrate service excellence to both internal customers—the people who work in the company—and external customers—the folks who use the company’s products and services.

Senior leaders. Top executives must fully embrace the service vision and communicate desired behaviors to the entire organization. Their goal is to create an environment where every person in the company feels cared for as a valued internal customer of the organization. Those folks, in turn, make sure external customers also feel cared for and valued.

You can see how, at an organizational level, creating loyal external customers begins by caring for internal customers—people who are empowered to create that loyalty with every direct contact they have with an external customer.

We use the CARE model to show the four qualities present in every Legendary Service provider: Committed, Attentive, Responsive, and Empowered. We’ve found that the lessons of this simple model, when applied, will have a profound impact on the service experience your customers—both internal and external—will receive. Here are descriptors for each quality:

Committed: Being Committed to customers means living the customer service vision by knowing and understanding the impact of poor service on your organization; acting on the belief that service is important; performing tasks with the customer in mind; and having goals and metrics for providing great service.

Attentive: Being Attentive to customers means listening to identify customer needs and wants by paying attention to customers’ verbal and nonverbal cues; being aware of surroundings and ignoring distractions; asking open-ended questions to draw information from the customer; acknowledging the customer’s needs; treating internal customers as if they are paying customers; and doing analysis on both internal and external customers.

Empowered: Being Empowered for customers means unleashing the full extent of your power by practicing good self-care habits; being aware of the power you have to serve customers; continuing to increase your knowledge about your job; knowing your company’s policies and procedures; and personally handling all customer situations you may encounter.

I’ve always said profit is the applause you get for creating a motivating environment for your people so they will take good care of your customers. A true service culture creates an environment where people feel involved, appreciated, and cared for at work.

If you empower your internal customers, train them well, and care for them, they will take care of your external customers. Those people then tell their friends about you and become raving fans and part of your sales force. That takes care of the company shareholders or owners as well as the bottom line. And that’s how Legendary Service leads to great relationships and great results.

I’ve been coaching executives for about six years now. Recently I was working with a leader who proudly identified himself as a perfectionist. He considered it a badge of honor that he routinely works ten to twelve hours each day. Even now, in his sixties, he has his company cellphone on him at all times and feels he needs to respond to emails, texts, and calls right away. When I asked him if he could set a lower expectation—such as replying within 24 hours—it seemed like a foreign concept to him.

This leader told me, unsolicited, that working so much meant he had missed many of his daughters’ milestones growing up. When they were kids, he told his daughters nothing was acceptable but A+ effort. He is proud that he set such high standards and believes his kids are successful because of those standards. I wonder whether he imposed his standards on his daughters to the degree that they, too, will miss out on parts of their lives trying to be perfect.

Over the years, I’ve heard many renditions of perfectionistic tendencies from my clients. This tends to show up most often when I’m debriefing a 360 or other assessment with them. It surprises and saddens me that many with the highest assessment scores—obviously very qualified people—don’t believe they are doing all that well. Inevitably, most of these people are perfectionists. Their perfectionism distorts their thinking.

Most of us believe it’s good to have high standard. Working hard and performing well are positive qualities. But there’s a difference between having a strong work ethic and striving for perfection.

When I Googled perfectionism, I found a quote from my old friend Wikipedia that sums up the definition well: “Perfectionism, in psychology, is a personality trait characterized by a person’s striving for flawlessness AND setting high performance standards, accompanied by critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations.”

Perfectionism is a huge, complex subject. My intention here is to touch on just a few simple but effective ways people can begin to combat their perfectionistic tendencies.

Notice your critical internal dialogue (which is usually hard to miss). An effective way to disrupt those self-critical thoughts is to replace them with more realistic and helpful statements—often called affirmations. Every time the internal critic surfaces, silence it with an affirmation. One I like is “I’m okay just as I am.”

Try living by a “done is better than perfect” philosophy. I first heard this statement from my boss. It’s a good one. As a recovering perfectionist myself, this thought has stopped me many times when I’ve found myself working to make something perfect. Of course, for most perfectionists, their “done” is usually much better than their non-perfectionistic colleagues’ best efforts.

Why should organizations care about helping their perfectionistic employees, you ask? Because perfectionism is linked to accident-related disabilities, absenteeism, burnout, and turnover.

Do you, or someone you know, tend to be perfectionistic? Try these first steps and let us know how they work for you. We’d love to hear your thoughts!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I am the general manager of a hotel property. I have always received great performance reviews, have high employee retention numbers (a big issue in my business) and my teams seem to really like working with me.

About nine months ago I got a new boss and she is a crazy micromanager. She doesn’t seem to understand that I have been doing this job successfully for five years. She is always breathing down my neck and questioning every decision I make. It takes more time to keep her satisfied than it takes to do all the other things I need to do.

It is demoralizing and exhausting. I want to tell her to back off and let me do my job. How can I do that?

Over Managed

Dear Over Managed,

You can’t. You can fantasize about it, but it isn’t going to get you what you are looking for, which is more autonomy. Your new boss is probably just nervous about doing well herself and is operating out of old habit driven by an overabundance of caution.

Here is what I suggest. Ask for some extra time with your boss after you have addressed the day-to-day nuts and bolts. Tell her you want to check in about how she thinks you are doing and about your working relationship. Be prepared to ask some big, open-ended questions to get her talking, such as:

Is there anything I am doing that keeps you from having confidence in me

How can I make it easier for you to trust me with __ (fill in one of your responsibility areas)?

What can I do to increase your belief that you can rely on me?

What would you need to see from me to be more comfortable with less supervision?

Why are you so uptight? (Totally kidding on this one, just checking to see if you are paying attention.)

See what she has to say. Don’t let yourself get defensive if she gives you feedback. Listen, take notes, and say thank you. Be prepared to take a stand for being left to your own devices with one or two areas that you know you have down pat—not the whole job, just a few areas, so you have someplace to start. With any luck, once you prove yourself to be dependable with one or more areas, she will ease up. The key is to consistently demonstrate competence.

Side note: In a new manager/employee relationship, it is better for the manager to start with tight supervision and then back off as the employee demonstrates competence. If the manager starts off being laid back, it is almost impossible to tighten up in the event it becomes necessary.

If it’s really hard for you to fight the urge to tell off the boss, I recommend getting it all off your chest with a good friend or your dog. Just get it all out so it doesn’t get in the way of your being open and curious when you do talk to her. Asking questions and drawing her out will get you much better results.

Your courage and openness should help get things on an even keel—but she may not change her MO. Ever. She may not be able to. If that ends up being the case, you will have a big decision to make. Good hotel GMs are in high demand!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Most people will tell you they are working as hard as they can, says bestselling business author Vicki Halsey. “The problem is, they still aren’t able to keep up with the workload. Today, people need to work smarter, not harder,” says Halsey.

“That means leaders need to (1) be sure direct reports are clear on what they have to do; (2) diagnose where they are on each task; and (3) get them the resources they need to succeed. People are doing activities—and lots of them. But the activity may not be targeted toward the critical goal, task, skill, or strategy that is actually needed for the organization to hit the target.”

According to Halsey, productivity improvement begins with observation. She likes to compare behaviors of the most productive people in organizations and the ones who struggle to keep up. One difference is that the former group has a laser focus on the work that needs to be done to achieve strategic goals.

“As Ken Blanchard says, all good performance begins with clear goals. So begin with clear expectations such as what someone needs to achieve, and by when. This is the essence of smart goal setting. Your goal is to create a crystal clear picture of what a good job looks like.”

It’s also important to check for understanding, says Halsey.

“As we think about setting clear expectations with people, it’s important to remember our differences in communication and learning styles. I teach a graduate class at the University of San Diego and also gave the same learning preference survey to my MBA students that measures if they are visual, auditory, kinesthetic, tactile kinesthetic, or auditory verbal. Results from students representing 35 different cohorts showed only 5.4 percent in the category of strong auditory learners. Consider going beyond telling—to showing. For example, in addition to explaining what a good job looks like, provide a video so that learners can actually see the behavior in action.”

Once goals are set, next comes diagnosing competence and commitment, says Halsey.

“Help people see where they are on a specific task in terms of ability and motivation, which we at The Ken Blanchard Companies® describe as competence and commitment. A person can be high or low on either scale. When these measurements are combined, the person will end up in one of four different development levels including Disillusioned Learner (low on commitment, low on competence) and Self-Reliant Achiever (high on commitment, high on competence.)

With an accurate diagnosis, a leader can put together a clear plan to accelerate the person’s productivity, says Halsey. But it requires a rethinking of the SMART goal setting model.

“I love the SMART acronym—Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Trackable. But for it to be most effective, change the “M” in the model to motivating instead of measurable.

“People want to see the impact of their work and they want to know they are making a difference. The original version of SMART begins with Specific and Measurable, which works well for identifying what needs to occur by when. But it doesn’t take into account the very human need of doing work aligned with our purpose, values, and who we want to be in the world.

“Sometimes leaders wonder why they should care how committed a direct report is to a task. When I am training a group of leaders and I hear that, I ask, ‘How many of you have something on your to-do list that you’re not motivated to do?’ Everyone raises their hand! And what happens to those things on our to-do lists? They go to tomorrow’s to-do list. And the next day’s. And what does that do to productivity? It impacts the quality and quantity of work done. So it’s critical that a leader has a very finely tuned sense of observation. They are observing their direct reports either moving toward what needs to happen, or moving away from it.”

That’s the commitment part of the equation, says Halsey—but remember it is critical to also diagnose competence.

“In its simplest definition, competence answers the question Has a person done this before successfully? If a direct report is new to a task with very little experience, the leader will need to provide a lot of direction and access to resources. If the person has accomplished the task successfully with high levels of reliability, the leader can delegate the task to them confidently. If the person is somewhere in between, the leader needs to adjust the mix of direction and support to match the person’s development level.

“So as a leader, you listen and observe very carefully. If the person is a learner, you help solve the problem for them. If they’ve had some demonstrable success but they’re a little hesitant, you flip the conversation and ask them how they think they should solve the problem.”

Halsey says in all cases, the leader needs to stay involved.

“If you leave people alone, that’s when they will move the task to the next day’s to-do list. If you want to keep accelerating their performance, you have to stay with it. Are they letting you know their status on a task, or have they gone dark? Go and check with them. If you notice you’re not seeing the person as much as you used to, you need to connect with them, figure out where they’re stuck, and get them back on track.

“Your goal as a leader is to keep the conversations flowing. That’s the secret to productivity—clear goals, people aligned on performance, and being able to diagnose then give what is needed to ensure they get the job done. When you accomplish that, you begin to work in a highly productive, aligned manner,” says Halsey. “That’s good for you, your people, and your organization!”

Would you like to learn more about creating a culture of high productivity in your organization? Join us for a free webinar!

3 Keys to Creating a High Productivity Work Culture Tuesday, April 30, 2019, 9:00 – 10:00 a.m. Pacific Time

Research shows that most organizations operate at only 65 percent of their potential productivity. In this webinar, bestselling business author Vicki Halsey shows leadership, learning, and talent development professionals how to reduce the productivity gap in their organizations by improving the performance management skills of their leaders. Halsey will share how to improve leadership skills in three key areas:

Diagnosing development level—how leaders identify the skills and motivation level of a person being asked to take on a new task

Providing a matching leadership style—how leaders flex the amount of direction and support they provide to create the perfect environment for goal achievement

Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how to equip leaders with the skills they need to align and coach people to higher levels of performance and productivity. The event is free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

In my role as an organizational coach, from time to time I am asked to work with leaders who struggle to manage anger and emotional outbursts. Amazingly, they often don’t realize that going on an angry tirade during a staff meeting or berating a direct report in front of colleagues is conduct unbecoming of a leader. In fact, uncontrolled anger often can be a career staller—and it definitely derails leadership presence. It also can take a toll on personal health and relationships both in and out of the workplace.

Coaching these types of individuals is challenging because they are labeled “problem children” and can create a toxic environment. However, the work can be rewarding when the leader is open to being coached and receiving honest feedback and is willing to change by increasing their self-awareness.

I always ask two questions of a client who struggles with managing self:

• How do you want to be perceived as a leader in your organization? • How do you think others perceive you as a leader?

Once the client answers these questions, we begin to create clarity about anger triggers or hot buttons. We discuss the importance of recognizing physical changes that happen within the body when rage begins to rumble. These might include the face becoming red, heart rate increasing, blood pressure increasing, palms becoming sweaty, or seeing stars. It is critical for the client to recognize their personal signs so that they can begin to implement self-management techniques.

Do you find yourself fuming when a work conversation goes bad or when your boss or a colleague dismisses your efforts in a meeting? Do anger issues lurk in other areas of your life? Here are 7 tips for keeping your temper in check:

Rehearse mental procedures and ask/say to yourself: • What is the source of my anger? • Do I need to do something about what is angering me? • I will remain calm and breathe deeply to allow oxygen flow to help me think clearly. • I will not take this situation personally. • I will slow down my thoughts and gain self-control.

Take a personal time out. Walk away for an hour, gain control, and cool off.

Implement relaxation skills. Examples include deep breathing; imagining a special vacation place and concentrating on its beauty; repeating a calming word that you choose; listening to music; writing your thoughts in a journal.

Get some exercise. Physical activity is a powerful outlet.

Examine solutions regarding what caused your anger.

Accept responsibility for managing yourself by responding to anger in a healthy way.

These are all simple steps that require self-discipline and courage. Daniel Goleman, author of the book Emotional Intelligence, says this: “Reasonable people—the ones who maintain control over their emotions—are people who can sustain safe, fair environments. In these settings, drama is very low and productivity is very high. Top performers flock to these organizations and are not apt to leave them.”

Use these 7 steps to keep your emotions in control and model how to create a safe, encouraging, and productive environment for everyone you lead.

About the Author

Patricia Sauer is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world.

In this episode, S. Chris Edmonds discusses the key points of his book The Culture Engine: A Framework for Driving Results, Inspiring Your Employees, and Transforming Your Workplace.

S. Chris Edmonds has a delightfully simple explanation of culture: “Culture is all about how people treat each other—how leaders treat their teams and peers, how employees treat each other, and how people treat customers and vendors. It’s about relationships and respect,” he explains. As simple as that sounds, it can also be a very disruptive concept to some organizations.

Many leaders and managers are asked to manage business results but are rarely asked to manage the quality of their work culture. “Get out of the mindset that results are the most important thing. Make respect as important as results. One of the first things I do is educate senior leaders about how important it is to have a culture that is purposeful, positive, and productive—one that is going to drive great customer experiences and employee engagement.”

So how does an organization start creating the culture they want to cultivate? Edmonds suggests writing an organizational constitution—a document that outlines the purpose, values, strategies, and goals of the company. It describes exactly how employees will engage with each other, with customers, and with vendors. An organizational constitution gives meaning and clarity to every employee by providing a clear understanding of how they can do their best work, treat others respectfully, and help the organization prosper.

It is critical to urge all the leaders in the organization to model the behaviors outlined in the organizational constitution. It becomes the document they can lead by, live by, and manage performance to. It helps them hold people accountable, praise people who are living the values of the constitution, and redirect people whose behaviors are not in alignment.

If your organization doesn’t have a constitution, individuals can lead by example. Edmonds asks leaders to pay attention to the relationships they have with their direct reports, peers, customers, and vendors. “I ask leaders to shift from an ‘I need’ mindset to a ‘What do you need?’ mindset. If leaders can help their people accomplish tasks easier, or give a client what they need, they will build trust and create a mutually beneficial relationship,” Edmonds explains. “I’ve seen it work with intact teams within organizations. I tell people to just start making a difference where they are.”

Edmonds shares several examples of working with organizations to help them define their purpose, values, strategies, and goals, and describes how these companies are creating their desired cultures. The stories bring his concepts to life.

Edmonds stresses that culture drives everything that happens in an organization day by day, including focus, priorities, and the treatment of employees and customers. A great culture not only drives great performance but also can help attract and retain top talent. However, a great culture isn’t something that evolves naturally—it must be defined, supported, honored, and modeled every day.

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice for Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I heard somewhere that as a manager I should reward good behaviors and coach negative ones. I have been trying to do this, but I realize I’m not really sure what it means. While we are on the topic, how many times do I let someone make the same mistake before I stop the coaching and just let them go?

Confused About a Bad Apple

Dear CABA,

It is confusing—the term coaching is used in so many different ways. In your case, you are using the word to represent what I might call giving a reprimand, a redirection, or feedback about performance.

If you have an HR department, ask for help documenting each attempt at having these conversations where you give feedback and direction. If you don’t have HR, keep a record for yourself. Make sure you check your confirmation bias—a way we all have of seeking evidence to support what we already believe to be true—as best you can.

How many repeated mistakes should you tolerate? Well, that’s up to you. The thing is, everyone makes mistakes—you make mistakes, I make mistakes, and our best people make mistakes. It happens. That is just normal work. People get overwhelmed by their to-do list and are moving too fast, or maybe they are doing a small part of their job they aren’t naturally great at.

When the same mistake happens repeatedly, though, there has to be a conversation about what is going on and how can it be avoided in future. I personally feel like three solid attempts is about right, because after that it starts to feel like Groundhog Day. Almost every manager I have ever worked with has given an employee entirely too many chances and suffered the consequences. I have never once, in twenty-five years of coaching managers, seen anyone regret letting a person go who either wouldn’t or couldn’t do the job. It is nothing short of liberating.

One last thing you need to consider: none of this happening in a vacuum. Your other employees are watching how you deal with this situation and taking note of what you let others get away with. Some may have to do extra work to pick up the slack around Bad Apple. They will start to resent and judge you if you let it go on too long. I know that one from painful personal experience.

So first, be kind. Give your potential Bad Apple a little extra direction and support and one more chance—and then, if you need to, call it. I guarantee you will have no regrets.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I’ve been a manager for over twenty years and I am facing a situation I just can’t handle. I have an employee—my hire—who has always been great, done great work, learned fast, had a positive attitude, and worked well with everyone. A cheery ray of sunshine on the team.

About six months ago, she started missing meetings with no explanation, calling in sick, and turning in work with errors. This coincided with her getting married. She got back from her honeymoon and just started melting down.

I have given her feedback on her work and have taken her to task for missing deadlines and meetings. When I do this, she just starts to cry. We have had several one on ones where I’ve asked her how she is doing. She is not willing or able to tell me what the heck is going on.

This situation is dragging down the whole team. Speculation about what is going on—including that her new husband is abusive—has become a full-time sport around here. Everyone is worried about her and looking at me to somehow come to her rescue. Please don’t tell me to go to HR—we are a small business and we don’t really have HR; it’s just me.

I’m going to have to let her go if she doesn’t turn things around. What should I do?

Worried

Dear Worried,

You sound kind. It is awful to watch people slide into the pit of despair. But here’s the thing: you can’t save people. And you really can’t save people who don’t want to be saved.

What you can do is continue to give feedback, be kind, and tell the truth. At this point, though, the truth might be something like “you will need to get it together or I will have to let you go. I am here to help you in any way I can, but I can’t help you if you don’t ask for help.”

That’s about it, Worried. It stinks. I know you hate it. I hate it, too. But I have made almost every mistake that can be made trying to save people, so I know this is true.

I’m sorry.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

We all have those times when we feel out of focus or off track. When this happens to you, do you ever consider that it could be due to poor self-management practices? For example, perhaps you were so intent on achieving the next level of your career that you sacrificed your health and well-being. Or maybe you felt stuck in a relationship that you found suddenly unfulfilling.

During my 15 years of being a professional coach, I have witnessed many clients struggling with similar circumstances. One tool I have used successfully and also suggested to clients is a values identification process. It is a powerful tool that helps people facilitate wise choices, strategize action steps that move them forward, and recognize situations in which their values are being compromised.

A useful online resource is this values assessment from mindtools.com. This site provides a list of common values to choose from and challenging questions to help you identify personal values. Here is a simple method to complete the exercise:

Review a list of 30 to 40 values that appeal to you.

Choose 10 to 15 that resonate – values you currently honor.

Review the 10 to 15 once again. Notice that some can be sub-categories of others.

After close review, select 5 values that are most important to you from that group.

Review those once again. Which ones do you not want to live without?

Choose the top 3 values you feel are critical to who you are and what you stand for.

Prioritize those 3 according to your personal preference.

If you need more help in clarifying your core values, answer these 4 questions:

What values must you have in your life to feel fulfilled?

What types of values keep showing up in your life?

What are the values that are core to the way you do your job, maintain your relationships, parent your children, and/or lead others?

What values challenge or stretch you the most?

One of the ways I help clients refocus and get back on track is to have them identify their top three values according to personal priority. We discuss the questions listed above and determine the values that need to be enhanced or maintained. Often, the reason a client feels out of sync or off track has to do with their unconsciously setting aside an important value. Some clients are in a work environment where they feel compromised because their values don’t match the company’s values.

In nearly every values discussion, the question of what is most important to the client emerges. At that point, it is helpful to identify action steps to realign the client with their top values. These might include setting personal boundaries, letting go of perfection, seeking a new job, or building new friendships.

Our values are a gauge that measures how close we are to our true selves. If we stray too far away, life can feel as though we are in constant conflict. Although it is worthwhile to identify personal values, it is critical to perform an occasional self-check. Are you living, working, and leading others in a manner that brings you fulfillment? Our values often change depending on our circumstances and life experiences.

Values identification is the foundation of self-management. It creates a level of self-awareness that helps us make wise decisions and become aligned with what truly matters.

About the Author

Patricia Sauer is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world.

A couple of years ago I moved from working in the bio/life sciences private sector to a government agency. It was a big adjustment, as you can imagine. Then, nine months ago, my direct supervisor was abruptly let go and I was tapped to be the boss. There was no due process, interviewing, or anything—I was just handed the job.

I was thrilled at first, but had no idea what a mess I was stepping into. I was put in the position of managing the people who were my peers, and they have all been here much longer than I have. I know some of them have struggled to not hold this promotion against me, but others have just let their hate flag fly.

If that weren’t enough, my new supervisor seems unstable. I never know what her mood will be. She starts every conversation with the problem of the day and wants me to help her understand who is to blame and how to punish them. I can’t really read her, but I can usually expect her to be hostile.

I am also dealing with some health problems that require multiple doctors’ visits but am afraid to share any information with my boss as I am certain it will not remain confidential. She thinks I’m slacking because I often take long lunches while at doctor appointments.

I am inspired by the mission of the agency, and I think I can really make an impact here—but I think the stress might just kill me. Thoughts?

Stress-o-Rama

Dear Stress-o-Rama,

Whoa. OK. Let’s review: you’re still adjusting to a government institution culture, your direct reports at the very least resent you and at worst hate you, and your boss is hostile and unpredictable. Is it possible your health issues are stress related? It doesn’t take an MD to suspect a correlation. Even if they are not related because you had them before all of this, it’s very possible the stress will make things worse. The research is unequivocal on this—and come on, did we really need the research to tell us?

First things first, my dear: your health. When people say things like “the stress might kill me,” they actually mean what they are saying, even if they don’t realize it. All the language we use that we pass off as metaphor is literal. That guy is a pain in the neck, this situation is crushing my back, she makes me sick, this job is sucking my soul out of me, my heart is broken. It is real. We are speaking the truth. And we all need to stop and listen to ourselves—me included—but right now, mostly you.

I appreciate that you are inspired and that you see how you could make an impact, but if the stress kills you, that won’t happen. Now you’re going to think I’m being dramatic, but I’m just going to say it. Stop. Breathe. Create an escape hatch. Go to HR, tell them about your health situation, and take some medical leave to get your sanity back. Go to your doctors’ appointments, learn to meditate, get acupuncture, go for long walks, speak to a counselor, create an action plan to get the likely direct reports on your side, and create a strategy to manage the nasty boss. Take two weeks, at least. Take PTO if you have to. You owe it to yourself to get the space you need to lower your stress level and craft a way to manage the multiple fronts on which you need to fight. Let’s be clear: I am not talking about taking a vacation. I am talking about taking a big step back, putting your self-care first, and putting a battle plan together with all of your wits about you. Get support from your best friends, your significant other, your parents. Devote yourself full time to getting yourself on an even keel and ready for what is to come.

With a little distance, you may see that you will not win here under any circumstance. That would be good data and something you can act on. Or you may see how you can win, get back into the game, and make the impact you so desire. But the breathing room and clarity you’ll get with a little distance are key. A couple of tools you can use immediately to calm yourself down:

Meditation. No one has an excuse not to meditate, because you don’t need a book or a class anymore. All you need is to use a free app for 10 minutes a day. 10 minutes of meditation will lower your blood pressure from the first time you do it—and keep it down for the entire day. I have seen this work for the least likely, highest strung people in the highest stress situations. It is real. It works. Do it. 10 minutes.

Morning Pages. This is a tool that was introduced in Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way. Now I really am dating myself because it was originally published 28 years ago—but some things just stand the test of time, and this is one of them. It is super simple; first thing in the morning, even while you are still in bed, you write, longhand, in a stream of consciousness, for three pages. A legal pad, a journal, a notebook, whatever. That’s it. This benefits everyone in slightly different ways, but the number one response I have heard is that it lowers the static—the noise level in your head. Do it. It will take you 9 minutes and you have nothing to lose.

So I’ll bet you won’t take time off. Very few people do when they most need to. But maybe you will try meditating and/or morning pages. Either way, I really, really hope you make a concerted effort to calm yourself down so you can think straight, get your priorities in order, and stop thinking you might actually die. Keep me posted, please. Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I am a subject matter expert in an engineering company and, well, a technical genius. I am aware it isn’t politically correct to put it that way, but it is the truth—I have an unusually high IQ and people who come to me for help literally call me “The Genius.”

Our whole team recently did a 360° feedback online. I received my report, which was okay. My direct reports have no complaints with me. I am a good boss because I studied how to be a good boss and do all that is required. Even though I find it tedious and dull, I do what it takes. My boss also thinks I am great.

The problem is with my peers. It isn’t so much that they said negative or judgmental things; it’s that for many of the questions they mostly responded “N/A,” meaning they didn’t have enough experience with me to credibly respond. The number of N/A’s from my peers made me realize how little they know about me.

I am a quiet person. People tire me out. After work, I really just want to go home, hang out with my cat, and test new levels of video games—which I do for fun for a gaming company run by an old friend. I am generally not included in social events, probably because I consistently decline any invitations I get. I am not just an introvert, I am a turbo introvert.

So, here is my question: Does it matter? Is it important? Is there a compelling reason for me to make the effort to be more social with my peers?

Well, it all depends on your work and career goals. I am a
little surprised that the success of your team isn’t affected by the fact that
you barely interact with your peers. It sounds like regular interaction and
cooperation with other teams is simply not required for you to accomplish what
needs to be accomplished. That may or may not be true as your company grows and
changes. There might be a chance that you will be OK with keeping to yourself
for the foreseeable future; however, you might consider the following points.

The higher people go in organizations, the more they need to be connected to their peers to share ideas and ensure collaboration between functions. Research about emotional intelligence reveals that IQ only takes people so far—and that people who have not developed emotional intelligence (EQ) will hit a career ceiling. There might be some value in discussing with your boss your vision for your future in the organization and asking who among your peers might be most critical for you to get to know. Another thought is that one of your peers could easily be your boss someday—and wouldn’t it be easier for you if they had some sense of who you are?

I understand that people tire you out, so I encourage you to
start seeing it as part of your job to create relationships with people in the
organization who matter to your success. You can study how to do that the same
way you studied how to be a good manager. You don’t have to be super
social—just an occasional coffee will do it. Don’t try to be anyone but
yourself, but don’t make it about you. When you are around people, find a
couple of open-ended questions that get them talking. Make it about work by
asking things like “What do you like best about your job?” “Is there anything
my team could be doing to make things better for your team?” and “Is there
anything that you think I should know?”

Then you can reward yourself by going home to your cat
knowing you have gone the extra mile. Apply that high intelligence to doing at
least the minimum. It won’t hurt you—and it will probably help you in the long
run.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

If someone asks
my opinion about their organization making a shift to a coaching culture, I
won’t say “think again, my friend”—but I will say “let’s think this through
before you go spending a lot of money on consultants and a lot of time and
energy rallying the troops.”

Who am I to say
anything? I am a passionate advocate for all things coaching. I have devoted
the last thirty years of my life to the ideas and technologies that have
emerged from the birth and maturity of the coaching profession. I am a champion
for leveraging coaching professionals in all areas of life and work. I have
created classes and taught managers and leaders to apply coaching tools to
increase their effectiveness with their people. I have taught coaching skills,
the coaching mindset, and variations of coaching processes to HR and OD
professionals—folks who are tasked with being mentors in organizations. I have
spent the last twenty-five years deploying coaching in diverse forms in companies
all over the world. And I have worked with several organizations seeking to
implement a coaching culture.

Here are a few
things nobody (except me) will tell you about creating a coaching culture:

Culture Change Is a Very Big Deal

Creating a
coaching culture is culture change. That statement alone should make any
experienced organizational citizen pause and cringe. It is not unlike asking an
individual human being to change—to literally alter their personality. And we
all know how rarely that succeeds. Culture change is huge and it is difficult.
It takes years of dedicated—actually, let’s go ahead and call it
obsessive—focus. And never mind senior level support: if the CEO isn’t frothing
at the mouth to make it happen, forget it. In fact, the CEO will need to fire
any senior executive who isn’t walking the talk, and for that they will most
likely need Board approval. Do you see the problem here? There just isn’t a way
to do it halfway. It’s all or nothing, from the very top to the guy who
delivers the water.

A Coaching Culture Is Not for Everyone

Each organization
must define what coaching culture means to them. I can tell you what I think it
means but that won’t help you; it will only give you ideas. Many organizations
I’ve worked with became so bogged down trying to get agreement on the
definition that the effort actually died of its own weight before it got past
the first stage. Other organizations, through their efforts to define and
distinguish exactly what kind of culture they wanted and needed to succeed,
realized they did need culture change—but the culture they needed was not a
coaching culture. It was something else. I considered this outcome a success.

Coaching Is Service

The dirty little
secret of coaching that nobody really talks about is this: being an effective
coach involves being a better person. Asking people to coach is quite literally
asking people to become the absolutely best part of themselves. Many people are
drawn to being a coach. Many describe it as a calling. And this is accurate—because
coaching is a form of service. It requires the coach to practice enormous
self-regulation and demonstrate a highly refined way of relating to others. It
requires the coach to put aside all distraction and be fully present in service
to another. It requires the coach to manage their impulses to interrupt, solve
the problem, or give the answer. These things are much easier for a
professional whose only agenda is the success of the individual they are
coaching. To do this as a manager or a leader—to constantly balance the needs
of the organization, the team, and the individual—requires a very special kind
of person. Most people who are successful in organizations are successful
precisely because they do have good answers, they do forge ahead, they do solve
problems, and they do not let the development of others get in their way. So
for them to shift to a coaching culture, we are literally asking these folks to
stop the behaviors that have made them successful and exchange them for
behaviors that will make others successful. The top sales manager who crushes
the numbers every year by scaring the living crap out of his people cannot be
exempt. Good luck with that, my friend.

Every Employee MUST Buy In to the Culture

A coaching
culture only works if every single individual contributor is fully engaged,
bought in, and ready to give 100% to the job. This might seem obvious, but it
must be said: for coaching to succeed, the players have to want to be coached.
They have to have a strong desire to grow, develop, and improve. They have to
be eager for feedback. They have to have a deep locus of control. And these are
all traits the organization will need to hire for—they cannot be instilled in
people. They can, however, be coaxed from folks who have been beaten into numb
submission by nasty, stupid, or just plain careless managers. So a certain
number of employees will need to be asked to leave and replaced. Can you
imagine a more unpopular reality?

For a long time, coaching was a fad. I am thrilled to report that it seems to be here to stay. But I want to be clear: creating a coaching culture in an organization isn’t a quick fix, and it isn’t easy.

About the Author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is the co-founder of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

My boss is really tough—I would say borderline
abusive. It isn’t just to me. He is awful to everyone. Because of this, I am in
a constant state of anxiety and my work has definitely suffered. I was very
good at my job but I know the quality has decreased because I have no
confidence and can’t seem to make a decision anymore.

I wait for the boss to tell me exactly how he
wants things for fear of doing it wrong. I know in my heart that I have a lot
to offer and that I could do this job very well with little or no input from
him.

Some days I feel like I just want to do the job
the way I think it should be done—to hell with it—I’m going to get yelled at
either way. What do you think?

Sick
of Being Scared

_____________________________________________________________

Dear Sick of Being of Scared,

Well, at least it isn’t personal.

Okay, Sick, there is a continuum of options here.
At one far end you have cowering submission, and at the other you have open
conflict. No matter where you are on the continuum, you are going to be scared
and your poor exhausted nervous system is going to produce cortisol and
adrenaline. Eventually, something will give and you will get truly sick and
have to take a leave of absence.

If you choose confrontation, at least it would put
some control into your hands. The more control you can exert over your
circumstances and the more certainty you can create for yourself, the less you
will produce stress hormones and the better you will feel.

Are things too crazy for you to catch your mean boss
in a calm moment and create some agreements? Tell him you want only to do
excellent work and make him happy. Ask him to give you input at key junctures
of your work so you feel confident about being on the right track. Walk through
your ideas about how the work should be done and get input from him. Show that
you are receptive to his ideas and willing to compromise.

Essentially, I’m saying don’t let your fear keep
you from having discussions, especially since it sounds like he is going to
huff and puff and yell regardless of what you do. If you can just remember that
this is just the way he is, it doesn’t actually mean anything, and you aren’t
going to die, you can take a stand for yourself and your ideas.

I think you nailed it—if you are going to get
yelled at either way, to hell with it indeed; you might as well go for it.
Think of your boss like you do cold rainy weather: put on your metaphorical
raincoat, pop up your imaginary umbrella, and just let yourself be okay with
getting a little wet. Who knows—he may respect you all the more for it.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

“In my early days as a consultant, I was asked by leaders of an
organization to help improve telephone communication skills. I soon realized
that the organization wasn’t actually interested in general telephone skills
but only wanted to address the mistakes being made at their front desk—especially
the negative feedback from employees and customers about one telephone operator
in particular. I decided to work directly with the operator on goal setting.

“She had been in her role for a long time but her manager had
never attempted to work with her on setting goals—he had only expressed
frustration about the complaints. Her service position was primarily reactive
and the manager had found it too challenging to set goals for a job where there
was little control.

“She and I tackled the negative feedback regarding mistakes by
setting a goal to reduce mistakes by 50 percent over the next two months. We identified
actions she could take to improve accuracy and customer service. We also asked
company employees to monitor their messages for mistakes and to report any
customer complaints.

“After a couple of months, I checked in and was dismayed to
learn that inaccuracies and complaints had actually increased! We attributed the bad news to the fact that we had
brought attention to the problems and asked for feedback. We decided to
consider the feedback a gift and began analyzing the data we’d received.

“Together, we discovered that most of the mistakes were occurring
between the hours of 2:00 and 4:00 p.m. Pacific Time. When the business day
ended in the Eastern and Central Time zones, calls were routed to the
California office. The extra volume was too much for one person to handle, putting
an unreasonable expectation on the operator and her ability to deal with calls
in a friendly and effective manner.

“The data gave us the evidence we needed to ask for help. We asked
the operator’s manager to put a second person at the switchboard for those two
hours. Two months later, the operator had not only achieved but exceeded her
goal,” says Fowler. “It was a simple solution—but without a collaborative goal-setting
approach, we never would have understood the underlying cause of her poor
performance. She would have continued to get negative feedback—and maybe lost
her job.”

That’s why Fowler is so adamant about approaching goal setting as
a joint responsibility where managers and team members work together to clarify
expectations, identify challenges, and develop a plan for accessing the
resources each person needs to succeed.

“Managers and direct reports need to sit down and talk about
what it would look like if each of them were doing the best possible job. It is
a rich, deep conversation that clarifies expectations on both sides about what the
job is and how they can work together to create alignment in a way that is
effective, engaging, and worth pursuing.”

Rethinking
SMART goals

Fowler says this type of approach requires tweaking the SMART
goal criteria used in most organizations.

“Most people know SMART as specific,
measurable, attainable, relevant, and
trackable. At Blanchard, we recommend
changing the M to motivating.”

Fowler explains that if managers don’t explore a team member’s motivation
and create a way for each individual to connect their work to personally
meaningful values, the manager ends up having to hold them accountable.

Fowler teaches managers to make sure they have a conversation
with each direct report where they explore the individual’s self motivation to
achieve each goal. This ensures the person’s motivation isn’t dependent on external
factors they can’t control.

“When someone can connect a goal to their personal values, the
result will be a person who is accountable—because they have clarified,
negotiated, or reframed the goal in a way that is personally meaningful and
important. That’s a key learning objective in our Self Leadership program. We
teach individual contributors that when they are given a goal, it is their responsibility
to:

Clarify the goal if it is unclear

Negotiate if they don’t believe the goal is fair or relevant to their
job

Reframe a goal if it’s not personally compelling or in line with
their values or sense of purpose

“Working collaboratively to clarify, negotiate, or reframe goals
sets up a joint accountability between manager and direct report that leads to
goal achievement.”

From
goal setting to goal achievement

Clear goals set the stage and make it easier for the manager to
provide the appropriate levels of direction and support a person needs to get
the job done, says Fowler.

“The reality is that most managers have their own work goals at
the same time they are managing the work of others. I’m always surprised when
organizations expect managers to be aware of what is going on inside the heads
of every one of their direct reports while they are each working on their
different tasks. We know from experience
that even our loved ones—the people we are closest to—often don’t know what we
are thinking. Why would we expect managers to know what each of their direct
reports is thinking?

“At Blanchard, we teach managers and direct reports how to use a
shared language to describe the four stages of development everyone goes
through when presented with a new goal or task. This ranges from enthusiastic beginner when someone is just
starting out, through the motivational dip we describe as disillusioned learner, to capable,
but cautious contributor as they build competence and commitment, and
finally, to self-reliant achiever
when they’ve mastered the task.

“When managers and direct reports have a shared understanding of
development levels, it provides them with a means to have effective
conversations every step of the way. Now a person can go to their manager and
say, ‘I’m at the D1 level of development (or the enthusiastic beginner stage) on this goal. I’m excited about the
challenge but since I’ve never done it before, I need direction from you.’”

A shared language also makes it easier for the manager to
respond appropriately and more effectively, says Fowler.

Fowler encourages leadership, learning, and talent development
professionals at companies of all sizes to consider how they can bring a more
collaborative approach to leadership in their organizations.

“In the last 15 years I have seen a tremendous increase in
research that identifies the importance of self leadership. In fact, increasing
the proactive behavior of individual contributors has been identified as the
single most important ingredient for the success of organizational initiatives.

“Teaching people how to use a shared language to self diagnose and
partner with their managers is a great way to get started. It creates an
engaging and motivating environment for the individual and helps the manager
and the entire organization move forward more quickly to succeed.

If you are a leadership, learning, or talent development
professional, you know that it takes two to optimize performance—the manager
and the direct report. As their leader, your dilemma is how to encourage and
facilitate the crucial relationship between the two.

In this webinar, bestselling business author Susan Fowler shares
how you can promote a collaborative approach to performance management that has
been proven to get results with high levels of engagement. Fowler reveals the
latest research-based strategies on self motivation and how to combine it with
the time-tested principles of Situational Leadership® II (SLII®)—the most
widely-taught leadership development model in the world.

Participants will learn how to position performance management
as a joint responsibility—with managers and direct reports working together to
make sure they set clear, motivating goals and effectively diagnose competence
and commitment on key tasks so that everyone has what they need to succeed.

You will explore how to help managers and team members:

Take a top-down, bottom-up approach to SMART goal setting with a
focus on motivation and task competence

Build mutual accountability for achieving agreed-upon goals

Take a situational approach to performance management where direct
reports self diagnose their development level and ask for the direction and
support they need to succeed

Fowler will share how this joint approach achieves outcomes
faster, more efficiently, and with a greater sense of engagement. It’s a 1+1 =
3 approach that yields much better results than when managers and direct
reports work independently.

Don’t miss this opportunity to get your managers and direct reports collaborating for goal achievement!

I was recently hired into a manufacturing company in the engineering department. I am leading two different teams. One of the teams is running smoothly, and the other one is a disaster.

Disaster
team is in constant turmoil— to the degree that some members of team are not
even speaking to each other. The work output isn’t a complete mess yet, but we
seem to be headed that way. I am leading both teams in the same way, so I can’t
identify what I should be doing differently. What to do?

A Tale of
Two Teams

_____________________________________________________

Dear A Tale of Two Teams,

Wow. The good news is that you aren’t
responsible for creating the mess. The bad news is that once a team has gotten
off on the wrong foot, it can be really hard to put things right. But there are
some things you can do—and everything you learn from this experience will serve
you well.

It sounds as if you are on your own when it
comes to becoming a better team leader. This is not unusual. Our research
shows:

Over
half of all work is done on teams, and most of us are on five or six teams at
any given time. It is how the really complicated work gets done.

Most
teams are suffering—only 27 percent of people would say that their teams are
high performing.

Just
1 in 4 people think they have been well trained by their organization to lead
teams.

The top obstacles to teams working well are
familiar to all of us. Teams fall apart because of:

Unclear
purpose of team and/or unclear goals

Murky
roles and decision rights

Lack
of accountability (some people pull their weight and others don’t), which leads
to resentment.

Lack
of candor and openness, which leads to the death of constructive conflict

Poor
tracking and no celebration of wins and progress

All of these complications undermine trust and
collaboration. Not surprisingly, lack of
clarity is the ultimate undermining factor. If you look carefully at your
team that is working, you will probably find that its members have somehow
created clarity around the team’s purpose, goals, and behavioral norms, and that
they know how to solve problems and resolve disagreements. Those areas might be
a good place to start with your disaster team. Call out that they are in
crisis, and request that you all go back to the beginning and start over to get
clarity on all of the above dimensions

It might be helpful for you to know about the study that Google did on teams that work well. They found these to be the most important elements for high performing teams:

Psychological
safety: Team
members feel safe to fully express themselves, share ideas, and take risks free
of the fear of humiliation, punishment, or judgment.

Dependability: Team members can depend on each
other to do what they say they will do, mean what they say, and have each
other’s backs.

Structure
and clarity: Everyone
on the team is crystal clear about the overarching objectives of the team and
their own individual goals and tasks for the team.

Meaning: Each person must find their own
emotional connection to the work or the outcomes of the work. It will vary for
each individual.

Impact: Each individual, and the team as a
whole, must have a clear line of sight between their own work, the work of the
team, and the big picture strategic goals of the organization.

As the team
leader, you can help create or increase psychological safety by role modeling
certain behaviors—the behaviors you seek in your team members.

Pay
close attention to each individual, use active listening techniques, don’t
interrupt, and acknowledge all contributions.

Be
fully present and engaged while with the team.

Be
accessible, share information about yourself, and encourage others to do the
same.

Include
all team members in decision making and explain your final decisions in detail
so that everyone understands your thinking.

Show
that you will not tolerate bad behavior by stepping in when you see it.

It all
starts with you. Creating psychological safety is a tall order, so I would
recommend starting with the behaviors that make sense to you and come easily.
Then drive for clarity, clarity, clarity. My experience tells me it’s very
possible you have one person on the team who benefits from creating chaos and
keeping things muddy. You know the adage: one bad apple spoils the barrel. If
this is true, it will be revealed as you drive for clarity and you can remove
that person from the team. If it isn’t true, clarity will reduce the friction
and the team will balance out.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Johnson shares seven ways managers can support their team members’ journey up the curve.

Take the right kind of risks—Help team members understand the difference between doing something just to compete, versus finding a problem that needs to be solved and creating the solution.

Play to your distinctive strengths—Help team members identify what they are good at and let them apply their knowledge to those types of projects.

Embrace your constraints—By identifying constraints and taking a hard look at them managers can help team members inspire innovation.

Battle entitlement—Encourage team members to think about new ways of doing things. Just because a process has been in place for years, doesn’t mean it is the best process. Entitlement can kill innovation.

Step back, down, or sideways to grow—Continually pushing forward is not always the best way to drive innovation. Help people understand the positive influence of stepping back to look at other possibilities.

Give failure its due—Accept what you can learn from failure. It might be the very thing to catapult you up the learning curve.

Be driven by discovery—Encourage your team to ask for feedback and use what they learn to discover things that might be holding them back.

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program, based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice for Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

]]>12090Your Managers May Not Be As Trusted As You Think They Arehttps://leaderchat.org/2019/02/28/your-managers-may-not-be-as-trusted-as-you-think-they-are/
https://leaderchat.org/2019/02/28/your-managers-may-not-be-as-trusted-as-you-think-they-are/#commentsThu, 28 Feb 2019 13:30:36 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=12086How can an organization have a problem with low trust yet none of its leaders consider themselves untrustworthy? Sounds crazy, right?

It must be possible in some sort of cosmic, twilight zone kind of way. Organizations frequently ask us to help them address low trust, yet when we work with the individual managers, none of them consider themselves untrustworthy. Huh?

If managers in low trust organizations don’t think they’re the ones with trust problems, how do you explain that 45% of employees say a lack of trust with their boss is the biggest issue impacting their work performance? Or that 82% of people say they don’t trust their boss to tell the truth? Or that research has shown people are more likely to trust a stranger than their boss?

The fact is, your managers may not be as trusted as you think they are. If you are a manager, you may not be as trustworthy as you think you are.

But, don’t worry, you can learn how to build trust. Like any leadership skill, the ability to build trust can be learned and developed. It’s arguably the most important skill required for leadership effectiveness and it’s needed in our organizations now more than ever.

A fundamental truth about trust is that it’s based on perceptions. People form perceptions of our trustworthiness based on the behaviors we use, and if you use behaviors that engender trust, then you will be perceived as trustworthy.

That’s why we take a behavioral approach to training the skills of building trust. Our Building Trust training program combines the latest research findings on trust with our 40 years of expertise in leadership development. Leveraging the easy to learn, easy to remember, and easy to implement Elements of Trust model, it teaches participants how to increase their own trustworthiness, rebuild trust that has been damaged, and how to have conversations with others about low-trust situations.

Participants learn to use trust-building behaviors that help them demonstrate greater competence in their roles, act with higher degrees of integrity, build stronger relationships with colleagues, and be more dependable in honoring their commitments. For relationships where trust has been eroded, participants learn and practice the skills and behaviors of delivering effective apologies which leads to the rebuilding of trust.

Most people are afraid to talk about issues of trust in the workplace, and for good reason. Confronting an issue of low trust can be an emotional firestorm that causes fear, anger, and defensiveness. After all, as our experience has shown, most people don’t think of themselves as being untrustworthy. The value of having a common definition of trust, which the Elements of Trust Model provides, is it allows people to have an objective view of what trust is and isn’t and talk about trust in a neutral and non-defensive way.

If you aren’t sure if your organization is experiencing low trust, I encourage you to download our free e-book, 7 Signs Distrust is Harming Your Organization. You may find that your managers may not be as trusted as you think they are.

Randy Conley is the Vice President of Client Services and Trust Practice Leader at The Ken Blanchard Companies. His LeaderChat posts appear the fourth or last Thursday of every month. For more insights on trust and leadership, visit Randy at his Leading with Trust blog or follow him on Twitter @RandyConley.

How do you guide a recent graduate—someone new to the work world—to not be so confident of his own work? How do you convince him to check his work, question his solutions, and search for the best answer instead of the first one?

I don’t want to tear down anyone’s confidence, but this person’s cockiness seems to be a surefire recipe for disaster. Plus, you really can’t learn if you think you already know. I appreciate your thoughts on this.

Want to Guide

________________________________________________

Dear
Want to Guide,

You
have to love it when a young new employee is an enthusiastic beginner and is cheerfully
ignorant of the massive amount he doesn’t know! I’m not sure how long this newbie
has been in your care, but of course there is no way to go back to the
beginning to set the expectation that you will be watching carefully and giving
feedback. (Note: It is always much easier to closely supervise a new hire and
then loosen up as they demonstrate competence than to start loose and later
attempt to tighten up. Tuck that piece of advice away for future reference.)

For
your situation right now, I would suggest you go at it with subtlety. Next time
the recent graduate turns work in, set up fifteen minutes to go over it with
him. Call out what works with his first draft and then ask him some questions
that will help him go deeper for the second draft. This way, it isn’t so much
that you are criticizing as acknowledging the positives of his work so far and
now asking him to go deeper.

Here
are some examples:

What
don’t you know about this topic? Is there a way to find out what aspects of
this topic you might be leaving out?

What
if you were to question the assumption in your first point?

Let’s
try looking at this from another point of view.

What
if you were to take nothing as face
value?

What
arguments might you use to support your point here?

How
might you expand on the implications of this?

Hopefully,
your new hire will gain some ground in the discussion and you can ask him to
put himself through the same list of questions for his next presentation.

You
can also proofread his work, track your changes, and ask that he proof his own work
in the future. (He must have had to proof his work in school, no?) Here are
some fundamental rules you can remind him of.

Leave
time between a first draft and subsequent edits. It is much easier to see
errors with fresh eyes.

Ask
a peer to do the proofing. It’s always much easier to catch errors in work that
isn’t your own.

In
a slide presentation, first go through it in “presentation mode.” Errors will
stick out like a sore thumb in that format, and it is much better if there
isn’t an audience for the discovery!

If
you need to go at it directly, start by sharing your regret that you didn’t set
the expectation up front that part of your job is to develop your people and
that you would be giving feedback. You can also share that it isn’t your
intention to demotivate him or shake his confidence, and that your input is
designed to help him to grow and to achieve his full potential.

The
key is to be clear that it’s fine for him to be where he is in terms of his
development in the new job—but now it’s time to sharpen his skills. Make it all
about the work, not about the person. Be kind, clear, concise, and relentless. Don’t
let anything egregious get by you—this way he will know you are paying
attention, and pay more attention himself.

Most
employees report that they don’t get enough feedback. You would be doing him no
favors by letting him skate by. Eventually, he will have to clean up his act, so he might as well get started now. Someday
he will thank you for it.

You
can do this!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2019/02/23/recent-graduate-too-smart-for-his-own-good-ask-madeleine/feed/212078﻿Trying to Have a Life in Addition to Work? Ask Madeleinehttps://leaderchat.org/2019/02/16/%ef%bb%bftrying-to-have-a-life-in-addition-to-work-ask-madeleine/
https://leaderchat.org/2019/02/16/%ef%bb%bftrying-to-have-a-life-in-addition-to-work-ask-madeleine/#respondSat, 16 Feb 2019 11:45:53 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=12060

Dear Madeleine,

I am an entrepreneur trying to grow my business while trying to also have a life. I know I have some bad habits that I should probably correct and I want to develop good habits moving forward. What are your thoughts on this?

You are smart to be thinking
about this. And you are right that habits can really make the difference between
success and anything less than success.

First, the basics: A lot of research has been done on habits. There is strong support for establishing regular routines that add up to small wins over the day. Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit, calls these keystone habits. They help us to exert more self control over our emotional states, act less impulsively, and stay focused on what we think is most important.

Getting up at the same time,
eating a healthy breakfast, and making the bed are examples. Habits like these tend
to build on themselves and create a virtuous circle. You can start by looking
back at times that you have been at your best and see if you had any habits
then that seemed to keep you in the zone. If that doesn’t yield anything
worthwhile, experiment with small things you think would make you feel great—then
slowly keep what works and weed out what doesn’t. If, as you mention, you have
habits you know for sure are not
serving you, Duhigg has some very good ideas on how to stop them.

Some tips:

Don’t try to do everything at once—tackle one
bad habit at a time.

Get support—a buddy, a group, a way to track
success. Any and all positive reinforcement is good.

Substitute a bad habit with something good. For
example, instead of going outside for a smoke, go outside for a walk around the
block.

Research also shows that people
who exercise are more likely to follow through with other habits that
contribute to success. Exercise is one of the hardest things to fit in to a
24/7 work scenario, but cracking that code will absolutely serve your highest
and best good.

My regular readers will roll
their eyes at me, because I am a broken record on this: developing a habit of
counting your blessings contributes to better brain chemistry as well as more
creativity, resilience, and happiness. All it means is for you to regularly
list the things you are grateful for. The great thing is that you can do it
while you are walking around the block, waiting at a stop light, or standing in
line at the market.

Now the work stuff.

When I was starting out as an entrepreneur, the book that rocked my world was The E-Myth Revisited by Michael Gerber. Clearly, I am not alone because Gerber has made himself the guru for small business and has a ton of wisdom to offer. I have used these concepts from Gerber again and again for myself and with clients:

Anything that gets done regularly needs a
clearly articulated and written process. Regular processes help a business run
smoothly. This sounds obvious—but I’ll bet if you look around, there are some
areas where you don’t have one.

Don’t spend time on anything that someone else
could be doing. As the head of your business, you are a finite resource. You
have to drive down tasks and problems that some one else can take care of. By
doing this, you free yourself and empower others.

Many entrepreneurs move fast and find explaining
things over and over again to be boring.
So, be clear about the vision for the business, and the values you use
to make decisions and then repeat.
Repeat long after you are bored silly, and then keep repeating.

As a lifelong student of
success, I have experimented with lots of other ideas from Hyrum Smith, Steven
Covey, David Allen, and others. Some habits that have made a difference for me
are these:

Put yourself first—because if you go down, the
whole house of cards goes down. To go the distance you will need to practice
radical self-care: sleep, good food, lots of water, exercise, some fun, and rest. (Rest does not mean watching TV, although that can
count as fun. Rest means prayer, meditation, staring at the horizon, reading
for fun, cooking for fun.)

Decide what, after your own health, is most
important to you and say no to everything else. Just say no. If you can’t, start
with maybe and then say no. Be
brutal. Get used to disappointing people. It is hard at first, but it gets
easier.

Do the hard stuff first: visioning, strategy,
emotional conversations, creative problem solving, etc. I tend to not be great
at that kind of stuff at the end of the day. Neuroscience research supports
this as well.

Look at the calendar every day for the crazy makers—in-person meetings that have no
transportation time between them. Phone or web meetings with no call-in numbers
or link. Meetings you need to prepare for that have no prep time already carved
out. No breaks for food. Hour-long meetings that should be 15 minutes. Meetings
that you shouldn’t be in at all. Eliminate time wasters, surprises, and stuff
that will make you late. I guarantee this: the minute you take your eye off of
it, your calendar will be the bane of your existence. (Of course, if you don’t
keep a calendar, this would be a good time to start.)

Write everything
down, even if you think you will remember it. Maybe you will, at this point in
your journey. You probably have a great memory now, but as life gets more
complicated (hyper growth! Lawsuits! Kids! Dogs! Aging parents!) you just won’t
be able to keep track of it all. And your memory will decline inevitably as you
age, much as I hate to say it, so having good systems to keep track of all the
stuff you need to do and think about will be a habit you are grateful for.

Automate and/or delegate anything you can. With
the online services available today, it is amazing what errands you can
eliminate.

Keep your eye on your social media habits –
anything that isn’t helping you be successful is quite literally a waste of
your most valuable resource. Don’t
forget the job of the news people is to keep you paying attention to the news,
don’t let yourself get sucked in. Stay
off of social media- unless you are
looking at puppies on Instagram, that is actually good for your brain.

Good luck to you.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

For most, if not all organizations, their employees are
their number one asset. This makes the wellbeing,
the engagement of employees very
important. Why? Because engaged
employees are passionate about their work.
They strive to provide superior customer service, solve problems, and
find innovative approaches.

A great way to generate a significant positive affect on employee
engagement is through individualized attention and one way to get started is
through coaching.

Every employee in an organization is different. Coaching is a wonderful way to give employees individualized, customized attention. Coaching is uniquely tailored for the person being coached. A coach works with an individual to understand what make them tick—to understand the employee’s own strengths and work passion. Coaching helps to draw out employees’ ideas and opinions and helps employees to discover how to best make their own contribution. It makes employees feel valued and appreciated. All this attention gets employees to engage more in their own career.

Is engagement an issue in your organization? Consider some
of these ways a coach provides individualized attention to those they serve.

A coach:

Takes the time to build rapport with those they coach to get a sense of who they are, not just what they do. Great rapport often increases employees’ motivation to work hard in their role and on the goals of the organization.

Values employees’ contributions and cares about their professional success. This in turn often empowers them to take more ownership of their own continued development.

Cares about the individual, working with them to understand their strengths and foster greater development.

Checks in with those they coach to see what is working, what isn’t, and what might the employee do different in the future.

Coaching gets clients to engage more in their role, their
development, and the goals of the organization. When employees receive
coaching, they feel positively supported and valued by their organization which
in turn generates and builds more engagement.

Engagement has been shown to increase retention, innovation,
and performance, and as a byproduct, revenue.
What organization wouldn’t welcome that?

When people feel that their manager cares about their development their commitment and energy increases. This leads to growth, increases their confidence, and helps them to reach their full potential. Use a coach approach to individualize attention, either by hiring outside coaching or developing those capabilities in-house. Individualized attention pays off for the individual and the organization.

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I’m a mid-level manager with a large team. My boss pretty much leaves me on my own to get my job done. He knows he can trust me. My problem is that I am constantly anxious about my performance, even though no one tells me it isn’t good enough.

Everyone keeps talking about people who are strategic, and I honestly
don’t know what that means. I’m pretty sure I am not. Right now we are setting
our goals for the year and it’s difficult for me. I think I’m just not a very
good planner.

The more I think about this stuff, the more anxious I get. I feel like
it is ruining my life.

Okay, let’s unpack one item at a
time, shall we? First things first: your anxiety. It appears there is no
rational reason for you to be anxious. Your boss trusts you, you are doing your
job well, and you aren’t great at planning—but very few people are.

Have you always had a lot of
anxiety, or is this a new development?

If you have always been anxious,
you might consider working with a therapist to get to the bottom of it and get
some real help. Most organizations have Employee Assistance Programs that are
totally confidential and allow for at least a couple of visits with a
professional. It can’t hurt and will probably help.

If your anxiety is new, you might
examine what has recently changed. Are you watching the news more? That will
ratchet up anyone’s anxiety. Have you altered your living situation? It’s
possible that a change in routine has thrown you off balance. Often even small
changes that we think shouldn’t affect us can throw us for a loop.

One client I worked with was a
wreck. When we tried to pin down what was going on, I suggested that it might
have to do with the fact that she was getting married. She kept saying, “But I
am so happy, this is a good thing, I
don’t know why I am so emotional and worried.”

Even the best change is hard and can throw us off center. So cut yourself
some slack. Identify the source of new anxiety so that you can address the root
cause. Sometimes just clarity and acknowledgment will help you get back on an
even keel.

As it happens, there are a few little techniques that can reduce
the hold anxiety can have. One is a gratitude practice. Any time you have a
down moment—walking up the stairs, taking an elevator, waiting for a light to
turn green—just make a quick list of all the things you are grateful for. Your
cat, your new phone, the lunch you had today, your best friend, your best
employee; anything good or even kind of
good that comes to mind. It literally shifts your thinking and your brain
chemistry and will always help, never hurt.

Another thing to try, especially at work, is to list your strengths and everything you are good at. Is there any harder job than mid-level manager? I don’t think so. It is fiendishly difficult to be squeezed by top leadership and by the people you are sworn to protect and serve. I wrote an article about this a few years back. I’ll bet you are actually really good at a lot of things that are easy to overlook when you are super focused on your least strong suit.

Let’s talk about the strategy
thing now. Strategy is a big word
that means lots of things to different people. The actual definition of
strategy, from dictionary.com, is: “a plan of
action or policy designed to achieve a major or overall aim.”

You clearly can do that, because you have done it in the past. It may not be
easy for you—but if pressed, I am certain you have a strong grasp of what your
team needs to achieve and what you all need to do to achieve it. You may need
to think out loud with a trusted co-worker or one of your team members, and you
may have to create several drafts until you get it right.

Planning does require a lot of
mental horsepower and some creativity; so, really, it isn’t easy for anyone to do. Try blocking off some
quiet time, especially in the morning when you are fresh, to map out your
ideas. It will be messy at first but you can put it all into order after you
get all your thoughts out of your head and onto paper. It will also take a few
iterations to get it right. Perhaps you are not comfortable with mess and
expect yourself to get it all crystal clear and correct on the first pass. You
will need to get past that expectation.

If you really feel stuck, there is no
reason not to discuss this with your boss. Just because he can depend on you
doesn’t mean you are on your own and can’t ask for direction and support when
you need it.

When people talk about others being
strategic, it can mean any number of things: they are making every decision
according to a big master plan, or they have a perspective of the big picture,
or they can see how multiple departments should work together to reach a common
goal or how the company fits into the industry and the trends in the
marketplace. Keep in mind, it could also mean the person is masterful at delegating
brilliantly so that they never end up having to do any actual work.

I worried the same thing about myself a few years ago and ordered the book Learning to Think Strategically by Julia Sloan. Some of the material—more than I expected, actually—was not news to me, but the author had some good tips I had never heard of for thinking things through. I would submit to you that a book like this will help to remind you of how much you actually do know and fill in a few blanks. Strategy just isn’t that big a mystery. I think the word just scares us.

Finally, anxiety is no joke. It
can color every facet of your life and make everything difficult. Don’t try to
gut it out alone if this little chat doesn’t help. Get some real support. It can
make all the difference.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Best-selling business author Scott Blanchard says managers who are effective at goal setting with their people keep two things in mind:

The big picture—why we are doing it and what matters about it?

The short term—what do we need to do now to move forward toward the larger goal?

Blanchard gives an example of
this process:

“I just finished some work with a
fairly large organization that has sixteen general managers. I asked if I could
interview two of the GMs who were achieving the best results. Even though I
interviewed them independently, their approach to goal setting was remarkably similar.

“Both of these GMs set big goals
and have clear expectations with their people that the goals will be met. They
also stress the importance and discipline of a weekly Monday meeting to discuss
with their team what’s in front of them this week, what they can handle, and
what they need to do to accomplish the larger goal. They succeed in the long
run by focusing on the short run and connecting the two.”

Blanchard says another important
key for successful goal setting is resilience—the
ability to adjust when things don’t progress as planned.

“Rarely do things go exactly as
planned. But too often when things go awry, instead of talking about what can
be done to get things back on track, people come to a full stop.

“My clients referred to what they
call “mental toughness”: the ability to keep performing when things change, go
sour, or take longer than planned. Early in the process, teams are primed with
the mindset that things aren’t always going to go smoothly—and they are given
ways to respond in the moment to achieve the best possible result. Goal setting
is not meant to be static. If the team is stuck or heading in the wrong
direction, the manager works with them to restate the goal and make
adjustments.”

Blanchard also emphasizes that
regular check-ins are especially important when the goal is new, difficult, or one
the team has not achieved successfully in the past. “When a team is focusing on
something new or challenging, frequent check-ins with the manager are essential.
As the team gains confidence and demonstrates competence, these meetings can be
scheduled further apart.

“In both our SLII® and our First-time
Manager programs we teach that once goals are set, managers need to check in
with team members on a regular basis to remind them what they are trying to
accomplish and why it matters. Managers also need to take opportunities to have
praising conversations when things are going well and redirection conversations
when things deviate from the plan.

“Over time, as people become more
confident and trusted, the manager can delegate more and pull back on the
frequency and intensity of these conversations. As people become self-reliant, the
manager can turn over the responsibility for achieving the goals to the
individual or the team.”

It’s all part of seeing the
leader/direct report relationship as a partnership, explains Blanchard.

“It’s about working side by side with
people—providing direction and support in a way that lets them grow into their
autonomy. For example, when a salesperson is working for a sales manager, their
goals are interdependent. As the salesperson demonstrates an increased capacity
to achieve the goal, the manager can direct a little less and use more of a
coaching style. Instead of telling, the manager is asking and listening.

“Setting goals is a foundation
for success,” says Blanchard, “and having clear agreements about performance
expectations, with regular check-ins, is the process for getting there. Obstacles
that can undermine relationships and results are a lack of clarity and a lack
of clear agreement.

“When things really matter, effective
managers make the effort to ensure the team is crystal clear on goals and
procedures. This takes extra time at the beginning of a project, but it will
pay dividends in the long term. Plus, it sets a process in place that the team
can use on future projects.

Would you like to learn more about helping your managers develop their
goal-setting, direction, and support skills? Then join Scott Blanchard for a
free webinar!

3 Steps to Building a Purposeful, Aligned, and Engaged Workforce

February 20, 2019, 9:00 a.m.
Pacific Time

In this webinar, best-selling
business author Scott Blanchard will share a 3-step process for creating a
focused, purpose-driven, and engaged work environment. Blanchard will show
participants how to

Set clear goals at the individual, team,
department, and organizational level

Identify motivation and competency for
identified tasks

Ask for—or provide—the resources needed to get
the job done

This webinar is designed for
leadership, learning, and talent development professionals charged with
improving leadership skills and overall organizational performance. Don’t miss
this opportunity to learn how to create a focused, purposeful, and aligned work
environment in your organization.

After years of working under
a very bright, well organized manager who communicated clearly, I now have a
new manager who is—well, a twit. He was a new hire who managed another
department and when our old manager left they moved him into this job.

It is a lateral move for him
and he is not happy about it. He has made no effort to understand what our
department does, and he doesn’t seem to have a clue. He crashes into our
regular department meetings and throws out tasks for people to do with no rhyme
or reason. He does no follow-up and gives no rationale for the huge amount of
“make work” he has us all doing.

A few days ago, he demanded
that I create a report and said he needed it for a meeting early the next
morning. I stayed late to do it although I didn’t understand what he was going
to do with it. As it turned out, he didn’t do anything with it—I heard from
someone who was in the meeting that he never presented it.

He constantly lectures us on
how we need to work harder to compete and keep up with the digital age. It is
all hot air and totally irrelevant. We all hate him.

My immediate problem is that
he will soon be doing my performance review. He doesn’t know me at all and was
not involved with the original goals that were set. I crushed my goals this
year and I am afraid he won’t give me the top ratings or raise I deserve. I am also
afraid my face won’t be able to hide the contempt I feel for him.

Well, this sure sounds stressful. It’s hard to go from having a great
manager who keeps everyone producing on an even keel to one who creates chaos. And
you are not alone—I get piles of letters that begin this way: “My boss/employee
is an imbecile/a cretin/a psycho/a criminal.” Your new manager sounds like a nasty
combination of all the above.

Chances are that this manager is madly casting about for some direction
and either too proud or too ignorant to ask for help. So here’s a thought:
offer to help him! Offer to share your department’s goals and how your goals
mapped to them. Be prepared to show in writing how you achieved all your goals
for the year and how your work helped the department and the company. Ask how
you can help him be successful in his new role. Make yourself his guide and
helper. It might just work. Either way, you will know that you have taken the
high road and made an effort.

If you prepare rigorously for your performance review, it will hard for
him to disagree with you. Get as much feedback as possible from people you work
with—peers, internal clients, matrix managers. There is a perspective that
everyone is doing the best they can do given their worldview, experience, and
skills. Adopting this view may help you find generosity in your heart and keep
the contempt off your face. Failing that, practice iron-clad self-regulation. If
you don’t get a fair rating from him, you need to be ready to escalate to HR.

Ultimately, you are going to have to either find a way to live with this
situation or find another job. It won’t hurt to brush up your LinkedIn profile
and your resume. It isn’t fair, but don’t let that stop you from being prepared
and doing your best.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

“As an organizational psychologist—and intuitively—I’ve always believed that self-awareness was an important skill. But as an executive coach, I’ve come to realize it is an essential skill. I wanted proof, so I started researching the concept.”

Eurich’s research shows that self-awareness is the foundation for high performance, smart choices, and lasting relationships. It also shows that most people don’t see themselves as clearly as they could. “Our data reveals that 95 percent of people believe they are self-aware, but the real number is 12 to 15 percent,” she says. “That means, on a good day, about 80 percent of people are lying about themselves—to themselves.”

There are two parts to self-awareness: internal and external. Internal self-awareness means knowing your values and personality strengths and weaknesses. External self-awareness means knowing how other people see you. The two parts are independent of each other. A person can be high or low on both scales, or high on one and low on the other.

Fortunately, self-awareness is a skill that can be developed—all it takes is a willingness to improve. Critical elements include questioning your assumptions about yourself and asking for feedback. Most people don’t like hearing feedback, but pushing past this discomfort is one of the first steps on the journey to self-awareness.

Eurich identifies a phenomenon she calls cult of self as a global problem. “Think about the way people use social media. They don’t post bad news—only great news. It can take so much effort to make ourselves seem a certain way that we become disconnected from who we really are,” she explains. “We each have a choice between being a meformer—just talking about ourselves, or an informer—focusing on what we do, how we can add value to the world, and what we learn from people around us.”

Self-serving behavior shows up in the workplace when people are not authentic and not open to feedback. The most productive work environments, according to Eurich, are built around people being humble, open, honest, and willing to learn and grow.

“A surprising finding centers on people who spend a lot of time in self-reflection. We assume they would be more self-aware, but it isn’t true. Some people spend so much time ruminating on the negative that it actually damages their self-awareness. The key to effective self-reflection is to think about something for a defined period of time and then make a decision, not to beat yourself up. For example, instead of focusing on why you may have done something, think about what you can do differently next time or what kind of support you need. Self-reflection should move you forward productively.”

To apply this concept in the workplace, leaders must model self-awareness behaviors. First, ask for feedback from every member of the team. Create a safe environment for people to share their truth when giving feedback. Most important, make sure this is a continuous practice—not just an activity at a retreat.

Eurich offers one last piece of advice. “Working on your self-awareness will put you ahead of 80 percent of your colleagues. It is the secret ingredient. Don’t put pressure on yourself to do it quickly—be open to what people tell you so that you can make a significant improvement.”

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice for Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.
About Tasha Eurich
For more information on Tasha Eurich, and to take a free self-awareness quiz, go to www.insight-quiz.com.

Perhaps, like me, you suffer from
the inability to say the word no. As
soon as I hear “You are so good at…” or “We really need you…,” I am captured in
the web of overcommitment and the stress that often accompanies it.

As I analyzed the various
commitments, projects, and requests that I have said yes to over the past few years, an interesting pattern emerged.
Nearly every one of these activities fed my need to add value to the world through
either helping others or using my personal strengths as a coach.

However, another pattern became
quite evident: one commitment cost me a significant amount of time and money;
another came with time demands that challenged my work calendar; and still another
involved extreme neediness and life challenges on the part of two close
friends.

At some juncture in each of these
examples, there was a moment when I realized the incredible outpouring of my
time, research, money, and stress, and I cried out loud: “What have I done?”

Fast forward to the present. I
persevered through all of those challenges and ultimately recognized that I
must perform some type of triage on every request made of me in my
non-professional life. How about you? Have you ever found yourself overcommitted
and then wondered how you got yourself in the predicament in the first place?
If you’re like me, you have—so I suggest you give yourself the Will this bring me joy? test. There are
four steps:

When a request for a commitment
arrives, take 24 hours to think about the ramifications on you, your schedule,
your finances, and your well-being.

Ask yourself: Will this commitment bring me joy or add
stress? Will it involve more time, money, or goodwill than I am ready to give?

Trust your instincts and be true
to yourself. Answer wisely.

Keep an index card visible that reads
Will this bring me joy? When in
doubt, answer the question.

When I look back on the outcome
of the experiences I mentioned above, something powerful occurs. I feel overwhelming joy. Joy that comes from
having fulfilled my purpose. Joy that comes from knowing new learning will take
place because of content that I created. Joy that comes from having witnessed
true joyfulness in a friend as she accomplished her quest.

Sometimes, taking on a commitment is a leap of faith. You can complete your due diligence by instituting the Will this bring me joy? test and saying yes wholeheartedly. Sometimes joy shows up in the darnedest places. Asking Will this bring me joy? will remind us to always seek it out.

About
the Author

Patricia
Sauer is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard
Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over
14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world.

If you’ve ever wondered why so many negative and critical leaders seem to rise to power, recent research sheds a little light on the cause. It turns out that even though we say we want compassionate and empathetic leaders, we perceive naysayers as being more powerful than their non-critical colleagues.

In one of a series of studies, 518 participants were shown four pairs of statements made by former U.S. presidential candidates during nationally televised debates. They were not told the candidates’ names or when the debate took place. The pair of statements included one that was positive and supportive of America’s future, while the other was negative and critical. Participants were asked to rate how powerful each candidate appeared to be, how effective they thought the person would be in office, and whether or not they would vote for the person.

Compared to the presidential candidates who made positive statements, participants rated the negative candidates as more powerful, more likely to be effective in office, and likely to earn their vote. In additional studies across different contexts such as art reviews and opinions on social issues, participants consistently rated the naysayer as more powerful, albeit less likable, than their neutral or positive counterpart.

Why is this the case? Researcher Eileen Y. Chou theorizes the cause is human psychology. We perceive naysayers as being more independent, willing to speak their mind, and willing to “tell it like it is.” This fuels a perception of the naysayer being powerful enough to not be bound by normal constraints or resources. This perception of power was strongest among those who felt the most disadvantaged. The disadvantaged perceive the naysayer as being willing to speak truth to power and disrupt the status quo.

So, should you incorporate more negativity into your leadership style in order to become more powerful? Let’s see…how can I put this in a sensitive, thoughtful, diplomatic way?

NO!

There is certainly a time and place for candid realism in a leader’s communications. Leader’s who sugarcoat the truth and try to get their people to believe everything is rainbows and unicorns are perceived as out of touch, fake, and incompetent. Leaders have an obligation to “keep it real” with their followers, but also need to inspire people with hope for a better future. Constant negativity and criticism causes people to view the leader as a malcontent and they eventually remove their support.

The more fundamental issue for me beyond the role of being a naysayer is a leader’s relationship with power. Power accompanies leadership and it can be used in healthy and unhealthy ways. The greatest use of power is in service to others and there are noble and altruistic ways of developing and sustaining power that benefits others.

One only needs to listen to the political rhetoric these days to see the harmful effects of naysaying leadership. Constant criticism, negativity, and fault-finding appeals to the most base instincts of humanity. The most successful and enduring leaders call to the “better angels of our nature,” as Abraham Lincoln said, and unite people through a shared vision of a more promising tomorrow.

Randy Conley is the Vice President of Client Services and Trust Practice Leader at The Ken Blanchard Companies. His LeaderChat posts appear the fourth or last Thursday of every month. For more insights on trust and leadership, visit Randy at his Leading with Trust blog or follow him on Twitter @RandyConley.

I have a high-stress technical job serving the sales department of a
professional services company. I have one direct report I am struggling with.

Everything is an emotional event with him. He takes everything
personally and even finds ways to get offended by positive feedback. He is
always melting down and getting sick. I am doing more and more of his job
myself, and I spend inordinate amounts of time talking him off the ledge.

In his defense, our sales people move fast—and it’s true they have
dumped extra work on him, and even some work he shouldn’t be doing. I have
talked to my boss about getting more help, but my boss tends to stay out of
things like this as long as the work is getting done. In this case, he just
smiles and tells me I can do it!

I am at my breaking point. I just don’t know what to do. Help?

At Wit’s End

___________________________________________________________________

Dear At Wit’s End,

You are clearly kind,
compassionate, competent, and over-functioning for everyone else. It will feel
mean when I point out that you are role modeling perfectly how to allow yourself to be taken advantage of. So, stop
it. Right now.

Your battle is on two fronts: 1) the problem with your direct report 2) the problem with getting what you need from your boss. Decide which to tackle first and then get up on your horse and charge. Remember, you say you are at your wit’s end, so at this point you have nothing to lose.

Regarding your direct report:
first go to HR and get yourself some help. You need to put your direct report on
a performance plan and hold him accountable for his share of the work. You can
provide him with information about what the company offers in terms of psychological
support. Many Employee Assistance Programs offer at least six sessions with a
qualified therapist and it would at least be a start for him to address his
emotional instability.

A manager can only provide so
much support, and it sounds like you crossed that line a while back. The guy must
get professional help or risk losing his job. I know it sounds harsh, but
honestly—he is not going to have a successful career without some real help, so
you are doing him a favor. The longer you cover for him and spend critical work
time providing amateur psych services for him, the deeper you are digging your
hole. Heck, get some of that psych support yourself—talk things through with
someone and develop a strategy to protect yourself from your own niceness in
the future.

In terms of your boss: it’s hard
to tell, but because you are so nice, I’m guessing you aren’t being direct
about all aspects of this situation. Get super clear about what you need. If
necessary, use a spreadsheet to show the amount of work coming in and how many
hours go into different tasks. That will paint the picture of how out of whack
things are.

You may have to threaten to quit
if you can’t get the support you need, which means you should be answering calls
from headhunters, trolling job sites, brushing up your LinkedIn profile, and
preparing to make your move. Be prepared for the possibility that you might
have to go, it will strengthen your position. But don’t think you can run away
from your own inability to set boundaries and stand up for yourself – if you
don’t really work on this now, you will get yourself right back into a similar
pinch in your next job. Use this opportunity. It will be really uncomfortable,
but worth it. I promise, you will never look back.

You can do it. Apply the same fierce analytical skills and high-level
competence to this situation that you use in the technical parts of your job.
Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I have a very simple question, but it’s one
I have been struggling with: How do you delegate to someone who doesn’t want to
do their job—and doesn’t really care if it gets done?

We have no accountability in our office. One
associate knows this and uses it to her advantage. She literally will not do anything
she doesn’t want to do, no matter how many times I ask about a project.

Our CEO does not like confrontation unless
it’s about him confronting a manager, like me, about a project.

I am so glad that you are reading
LeaderChat! That blog was actually written by my colleague, coaching solutions partner
Terry Watkins, so I asked her to weigh in on this response.

Terry says:

“It’s important to understand what is
causing the associate to be disengaged. Your approach is going to be different
based on your professional connection to the associate. Are you her manager, or
are you a peer? As her manager, you may be more direct and firm, and you may
incorporate an accountability measure. As a peer, you would try to be more
persuasive and collaborative.

Delegation
begins with planning. Follow these steps in order:

Identify the right
person for the task.

Communicate the
purpose and details of the task.

Establish a
reasonable timeline with agreed-upon milestones and checkpoints.

Schedule times for
monitoring progress to give feedback and accountability.

If you believe this associate is the
right person for the project, this should set you up for success. If she is not
meeting checkpoint deadlines, you and she need to have a heart-to-heart
conversation. Be crystal clear on the need for and expectations of the project
and why she is the best person to complete it. Ask her for her thoughts on the
project, using open-ended questions or statements such as: What is getting in your way? Is there something you need that you aren’t
getting? or Help me understand what
is going on with you.

You want to get to the heart of the matter with the associate so that you really understand the motivation for her behavior. Don’t rush the conversation—recognize that it may take some time for her to open up. Create a safe environment by showing empathy, asking open-ended questions, and practicing active listening to show you care. Identify ways you can support her in completing the project, including regular one-on-one meetings that will allow you to monitor progress. If the associate continues to resist, a formal conversation about a performance improvement plan or transitioning to another role may be necessary.”

This is
Madeleine again. Terry’s advice is sound—and it describes management, not confrontation.

How on
earth does anything ever get done if there is no accountability? How does your
CEO hold you accountable? Can you use
his methods?

Do your
best to actually manage the situation and see what happens. If the associate
still refuses to do the job with all of the support and direction you are
offering, she needs to go. Or if you get no support for hiring employees who
actually want to work, maybe you need
to go.

Good luck
to you!

Love, Madeleine (and Terry!)

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

Delegation and control are common topics with my coaching clients. They recognize the importance of delegation and how it can serve them, but some still struggle with letting go.

In order to free up space to be more strategic, have a
greater impact, be more efficient, and achieve work/life balance, delegating
appropriate tasks to others is necessary and even required for managers today. This
can feel risky—especially if the leader is high controlling, is a
perfectionist, or has a heavy workload. Effective leaders who climb the
corporate ladder are skilled at delegating and developing people.

When delegating, room must be made for learners to try
and fail, which takes extra time. Similar to Blanchard’s SLII® model,
extra time is required in Style 1 (Directing) to provide details, show and tell
how, monitor frequently, and give feedback to develop a team member on a new
task. As the learner develops, the leader can eventually move to Style 4 (Delegating)
and devote less time to the team member.

It takes time and planning to effectively develop
others, but it’s worth it. Delegation and the development of others are linked
together!

If internal issues are standing in the way of
delegating, leaders must ask themselves what is causing the need for control. Why do I fear letting go and trusting others
to do it correctly? Do I really believe I am the only one who can do it? Do I
just want attention? Some managers simply enjoy the sense of accomplishment
because they can complete the tasks quickly and accurately with no heavy brain
power (cognitive strain).

Ready to start letting go? Here are seven tactics that
will help you be more successful.

Create a detailed
plan for transferring the task.

Be clear of the
objectives and outcomes of the task.

Create a timeline.

Establish how and
when you will monitor progress.

Do not make
assumptions.

Create a safe
space for learning and failures.

Provide timely
feedback.

Many times, what stands in the way of managerial success is control. The leader’s need to remain in control of a task or project will eventually cause both leader and direct report to fall short of expectations. Delegating more will allow for growth opportunities and professional development for both you and your people. Use these suggestions, take a deep breath, and give it a try today!

About the Author

Terry Watkins is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I started my career in marketing and had some great
jobs, but I really became interested in the people side of things after being
trained in communication and working in teams.

My graduate studies were in Organizational
Development. I am still at the first job
I was offered—in HR as a trainer—but I just don’t like it. Most employees don’t
seem to really care about training and it is always up to me to try to make it
interesting for them.

I now realize that what I really am is a coach. I
wish I had a graduate degree in coaching instead of OD. How can I tell if I would be a good
coach? How do I know if I would like it
better than being a trainer? How would you recommend I proceed?

I get
a lot of letters asking about this as well as a lot of requests for
informational interviews from people who are thinking of becoming coaches, so
your questions are timely.

What is
coaching, really? It depends on who you ask. It might be easier to define what coaching isn’t. Coaching isn’t giving people feedback, telling them what to do, or teaching
or training them. Coaching isn’t a
matter of simply listening really well and asking some questions.

Our
organization defines coaching as “A deliberate process using focused
conversations to create an environment that results in accelerated performance
and development.”

Coaching
requires partnership and dialogue. Ideally, both parties learn from the
experience. Many think that coaching is about giving advice. In fact, a coach
can offer ideas and suggestions but generally guides clients through their own
decision process. One of the reasons I
do this column is because I really don’t give much advice in my work, but it is
so much fun to do it!

How can I tell if I would be a good coach? Good coaches are collaborative by nature. They want the best for their clients and see them as capable and creative. They trust others to solve problems and make decisions. The professional organization I am most familiar with is the International Coach Federation (ICF), which is the oldest and largest professional association for coaches. The ICF has developed a thorough list of competenciess that can help you understand where your development gaps might be.

Where do I begin if I think I want to pursue being
a professional coach? The ICF
website (www.coachfederation.org) is
an excellent source of information about all aspects of embarking on a coaching
career. If you decide to go forward, you will need to go through a coach
training program. There are a lot of
programs to choose from, many of which offer a lot of flexibility and a nice
mix of in-person and online training. Attend
all informational programs and really do your research before you decide on a
training program. There are a lot of scams out there where people promise the
moon but the program doesn’t really deliver.
Get references—find people who have attended the programs that appeal to
you and talk to them. And stay away from
any program that uses high-pressure selling techniques to get you to sign up.

Many
credentialed coaches complain that anyone can hang up a shingle and say they
are a coach, and this is true. What many
people can’t do is get through an
accredited training program, jump through the hoops to get their credential,
stay on top of their own professional development, and build a thriving
practice of clients who will refer them to others.

Can I make a living as a coach? Yes,
but don’t quit your day job. Give yourself a reasonable timeline and get used
to the idea that you have to market
yourself. Having a background in marketing should help you, because building a
thriving practice takes a fair amount of work. Okay, a lot of work. It will also help your credibility if you lean
on your professional experience. Since you are already working in an
organization, you might be able to become an internal coach where you are—consider
discussing this possibility with your boss. I have seen some situations where an
organization has funded coach training for some of their HR people.

The
thing most people won’t tell you is that to be successful as a coach you have
to be able to attract clients, retain your clients, and thrill them to the
point that they refer people to you. So
you must get really, really good at it and be impeccably professional. This
will take some diligence and some time.

Coaching
is a deeply rewarding career. The coaching mindset and skills translate
beautifully to mentoring, managing, parenting, and building a terrific life for
yourself. It will involve a steep learning curve and some intense personal
development, which is not always expected but always necessary. It will take
longer than you think it should, and it will be harder, too—but then that is
true of most things.

I wish
you good luck on your coaching adventure.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

In his seminal 1973 book, The Nature of Managerial Work, Henry Mintzberg proposed ten roles that define the day-to-day activities of a manager. They are: Figurehead, Leader, Liaison, Monitor, Disseminator, Spokesperson, Entrepreneur, Disturbance Handler, Resource Allocator, and Negotiator. These roles are still referenced in modern articles about management and in training courses for managers.

The world today is unimaginably different from a 1973
perspective. Workplace diversity, distributed workforces, globalism,
technology, and previously unknown industries make for a landscape as different
from 1973 as post-industrial revolution farming was from its predecessor.

In reviewing the managerial roles espoused by Mintzberg, we
wonder: Are they the same today? As a manager do your responsibilities
incorporate them or are things different for you?

Special Offer to Participate in Research Project

The Ken Blanchard Companies is looking for two dozen
managers to interview regarding their modern managerial activities and roles.
Candidates who take part in interviews can choose from selected online courses
offered by the company for their participation. Interested managers should
contact Jim Diehl and the product development research team at The Ken
Blanchard Companies for additional details.

Use this email to request information on participation: jim.diehl@kenblanchard.com

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2019/01/10/is-managing-really-different-today-than-it-was-four-decades-ago/feed/011929Ken Blanchard on Leading at a Higher Levelhttps://leaderchat.org/2019/01/08/ken-blanchard-on-leading-at-a-higher-level/
https://leaderchat.org/2019/01/08/ken-blanchard-on-leading-at-a-higher-level/#commentsTue, 08 Jan 2019 11:45:26 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11904The new, completely updated, third edition of Ken Blanchard’s perennial bestseller, Leading at a Higher Level, was released just last month.

The first edition came out in 2006 and featured the best thinking from 18 different authors, summarizing the key concepts from all the Blanchard programs at the time. The new edition continues that tradition. Now featuring the work of 25 authors, this edition includes four new chapters: Building Trust, Mentoring, Collaboration, and Organizational Leadership.

“The umbrella concept,” says lead author Ken Blanchard, “is servant leadership—the idea that people lead best when they serve first.

“There are the two parts of servant leadership,” explains Blanchard. “First, the strategic or leadership part of servant leadership is identifying the target: the purpose of your business, your picture of the future, and the values that will guide your decisions.

“Once a target and vision are set, how do leaders execute or accomplish that vision? They must turn the traditional hierarchical pyramid upside-down to begin the operational or servant aspect of servant leadership. This is when you diagnose the individual or team in terms of their skills and motivation to get the job done. You identify the competencies and commitment that need to be developed. Now your role as a leader is to provide the direction and support people can’t provide for themselves.

“Using a situational approach to leadership through SLII®, leaders must diagnose development levels, says Blanchard. “If individuals or teams are new to a task, the leader needs to provide direction. If individuals or teams are lacking confidence or commitment, the leader needs to provide support.”

Blanchard points to the new chapter on Organizational Leadership, where the same concept can be applied to an organization as a whole.

“Organizations, like people, can be at different levels of development. As a new C-level leader, you need to identify the organization’s development level, so you can apply the right leadership style. We’ve seen too many situations where new CEOs—wanting to make a quick impact—enter organizations and immediately go to their favorite leadership style rather than to the one that is needed. We include two well-known case studies in the new chapter that show the benefits of a good match and the negative consequences of a misdiagnosis and bad match.

“We’ve all seen the negative consequences of poor leadership. Our goal with this book is to provide the next generation of leaders with a road map and curriculum for great leadership.

“This involves focusing on both people and results,” says Blanchard. “You cannot sustain performance over the long term with an either/or approach. The market demands innovative, agile solutions. This requires a both/and approach to management that places equal emphasis on results and the needs of people. That’s the success formula today’s top companies are using to attract the best and brightest.

“When you lead at a higher level, people work together in a way that excites customers and gets results. Leadership is something you do with people—not to people,” Blanchard continues. “And profit is the applause you get for creating a motivating environment for people so they will take good care of your customers.

“We hope to inspire leaders to go beyond short-term thinking and zero in on the right target. We want to teach leaders to empower people to unleash their incredible potential. Finally, we want to encourage leaders to ground their leadership in humility and focus on the greater good. It’s a tall order, but we think this book provides everything a leader needs to get started.”

Would you like to learn more about creating a higher level of leadership in your organization? Join Ken Blanchard for a free webinar on January 23!

In this webinar, best-selling business author Ken Blanchard shares key concepts from the newly released third edition of his book, Leading at a Higher Level. Ken will share a four-step approach to building an organizational culture that leads to engaged people and improves long-term business results.

Participants will explore:

How to set your sights on the right target and vision. A compelling vision tells your organization who you are (purpose), where you’re going (picture of the future), and what guides your behavior and decisions (values). Ken will share how a compelling vision creates a strong organizational culture where everyone’s interests and energy are aligned. This results in trust, customer satisfaction, an energized and committed workforce, and profitability.

How to treat your people right. Without committed and empowered employees, you can never provide good service. You can’t treat your people poorly and then expect them to treat your customers well. Ken will explain how treating your people right begins with good performance planning to get things going. It continues with managers who provide the right amount of direction and support that each individual employee needs to achieve those goals and performance standards.

How to treat your customers right. To keep your customers coming back today, you can’t be content with simply satisfying them. Instead, you must create raving fans–customers who are so excited about the way you treat them that they want to tell everyone about you. Ken will share how companies that create raving fans routinely do the unexpected on behalf of their customers, and then enjoy the growth generated by customers bragging about them to prospective clients.

How to have the right kind of leadership. The most effective leaders realize that leadership is not about them and that they are only as good as the people they lead. These leaders seek to be serving leaders, not self-serving leaders. Ken will explain how once a vision has been set, leaders move themselves to the bottom of the hierarchy, acting as a cheerleader, supporter, and encourager for the people who report to them.

Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how to create a culture where leaders who are grounded in humility and focused on the greater good can create organizations where both people and profits grow and thrive. This both/and philosophy, Blanchard contends, is the essence of leading at a higher level.

In this exciting episode, Peter Bregman shares his thoughts about leadership and the importance of showing up with confidence, being connected to others, and being committed to a purpose in a way that inspires others to follow. He explains that the most successful leaders not only know what to say and do, but are willing to experience the discomfort, risk, or uncertainty of saying and doing it. These leaders display what Bregman calls Emotional Courage.

“Think about a conversation you need to have, but haven’t. You have all the skill and knowledge you need, but you aren’t doing it. Why? Most likely it is because you believe it may cause you to feel something you don’t want to feel. You might become disconnected from that person. Or they might come back in anger or act in a passive aggressive way that can damage relationships and put projects at risk. It could simply make you uncomfortable—and no one likes to feel uncomfortable. Emotional Courage is not how much you know—it is about what you are willing to feel,” says Bregman.

The four elements of Emotional Courage are simple to understand, but not always easy to implement. To be a leader with Emotional Courage, you need to:

Be confident in yourself. To be confident, you need to understand who you are as a leader and then determine who you want to become. Asking for feedback is a powerful way to uncover blind spots, while listening to and accepting that feedback is the key to changing your behavior. Building confidence creates the foundation for your leadership style.

Be connected with others. Listening with a willingness to learn something new is the birthplace of connection. Following through on commitments builds trust for a lasting, honest relationship. True success depends on connecting with others.

Be committed to a purpose. Create a clear, powerful, compelling focus toward a larger purpose in order to channel your energy and the energy of those around you toward a common goal. Achieving a common purpose requires extreme focus.

Act with Emotional Courage. Understand when you don’t want to feel something and take steps toward it. Be courageous and act boldly. Emotional courage feeds on confidence, connections, and commitment.

“The key thing to remember is to be aware of what is important to you and be willing to take the risk to increase your own productivity. That will have a positive impact on personal and organizational results—because you will be operating with Emotional Courage.”

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program, based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice for Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I work in a professional services firm and we have an open-space concept. Almost everyone is on the phone all day or reading complicated documents.

We have one assistant who supports a whole bunch of the senior people, and she sits right near me. She is an idiot, and loud to boot. Every day she has a new theme, and she works that theme all day – Rainy Days and Mondays, happy hump day, hot enough for ya? Every person who walks by her desk, every single phone call. Clichés on repeat all day long.

I am at the end of my rope, it has gotten under my skin to the point that I can’t even trust myself not to say something rude or even mean to her. She is a scourge to everyone in the office. I have talked about it with my boss, who incidentally has an office with a door. But what would anyone say to her? I use noise cancelling headphones with loud music as much as a I can but when I am on long conference calls, that doesn’t work.

I dream of blessed silence and being able to just sit and do my work without fantasizing about slapping her. Help.

Get over it. The only thing you can do right now is change your attitude about this. Play a game with yourself about what the cliché will be today. Count how many times she says it and start a betting pool. Remind yourself that all the annoying things she does are simply mechanisms to get herself through the day and she is probably dealing with stresses you don’t know about. Take the woman to lunch, get to know the woman and find something that will make you love her.

Re-frame this situation and take a deep breath and decide to let it roll off your back and smile and be kind.

Absolutely do get creative and try to find a quiet place to do focused work if you can. I worked with one manager who used to take his laptop into the emergency stairwell when he needed some quiet time.

This woman has been sent by the universe to test you. You are failing the test. I have failed this test, I kid you not, I left a yoga class I loved once because of the ridiculous breathing shenanigans of the woman on the mat next to me. Who was the one with the problem? She had a great class, so, it wasn’t her.

Let it go. Focus on what is important and you will be surprised by how the sound fades into the background.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

As we wrap up season one of the LeaderChat Podcast, Ken Blanchard and Chad Gordon revisit some of their favorite episodes. They share new thoughts about the important messages from our guests and invite you to send questions you would like Ken to answer in future episodes. Just send your questions to podcast@kenblanchard.com.

Enjoy this episode of Chad Gordon interviewing Dr. Travis Bradberry, researcher and author of the best-selling book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0—which has sold over one million copies!

Bradberry shares how emotional maturity is absolutely critical for success as a leader, and how emotional intelligence is a capacity that can be learned and developed. He explains that increasing your emotional intelligence begins with self-awareness.

Bradberry discusses how to integrate EQ training into a leadership development curriculum—and how the emotional intelligence displayed by top leaders can set the example for all levels of leadership in an organization. Bradberry also shares strategies for dealing with stress, procrastination, and toxic people.

Emotions are a primary driver of behaviors and emotional intelligence is a foundational skill of all good leaders. Learn how to be a master of your emotions in a way that increases your effectiveness as a leader.

And be sure to listen to the very end of this 30-minute interview to hear Ken Blanchard share his thoughts and personal takeaways on Dr. Bradberry’s ideas.

What is your opinion about New Year’s resolutions? I have a list of
goals as long as my arm for the New Year, and I realize I am probably overdoing
it. How do I know how much is enough, and how much is too much?

There is something so inspiring about the feeling of a fresh start, isn’t there? But we know good intentions alone aren’t going to get us where we want to go. A ton of research has been done on the topic of goal setting and achievement. The newest entry to the field is from Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit. His most recent book, Smarter, Faster, Better, is a fairly standard take on the topic but fresh for today. To be fair, though, he stands on the shoulders of Steven Covey (The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People) and Hyrum Smith (The 10 Natural Laws of Time and Life Management). These two books caused me to radically change my life twenty-five years ago. Both Covey and Smith insist that every choice you make must be rooted in your deepest values in order for you to be successful. For example, losing weight won’t work if you are doing it to please someone else. A goal must be important to you or you are not likely to accomplish it.

Here are a few quick tips if you
aren’t up for a stack of books—although a little Googling will uncover many
good summaries!

Pick one
big thing. Probably the main reason people don’t achieve their goals—other
than lack of deep personal commitment—is that they have set too many. So your angst
that you may be loading up on goals is probably spot on. As you swing back to
normal after a big holiday season, you are already behind, so you must manage
your own expectations. Choose one big thing and let the rest go.

Get
Support. Lots of it. Change is hard, no matter what it is—and if you’re
trying to break an addiction like nicotine or sugar, it is doubly hard. The
brain craves anything that causes a predictable release of dopamine, so you’ll
need more support than you think you do. Tapering off can help, as can support
groups, a buddy, keeping a journal, daily acknowledgment, or asking for help
from your guardian angel or whatever you know to be your higher power.

Break it
Down. You have one big goal. Break it down into small sub-goals or daily
commitments. Ask yourself: What can I do,
every day, to keep myself on track? Make a chart and check off something every
day. (I’m sure there’s an app for this, but I’m committed to reducing my screen
time, so I go with paper.)

Be Clear.
You may have heard of the SMART model—it’s been around for years and still offers
good guidelines for goal setting. Here’s the way I learned it:

S = Specific

M = Measurable

A = Attainable

R = Realistic

T = Timebound

Other
interpretations for the model exist but I won’t go into a long analysis here,
because so many have done it so well. Again, Google can shed more light on this
if you’re interested.

I mention the
SMART model because I have observed in myself and in my coaching clients that specificity has tremendous power, and so
does a timeline. It’s fairly easy to
set a SMART goal with something like losing weight, because we can use numbers.
With other things, it can get foggy. So specificity and clarity are key. For
example, “I want to get better at my job” is not going to help you. “I am going
to achieve ‘Exceeds Expectations’ on the following three competencies at my
job” will take you much further.

Note: before you
start, you must ask yourself: How will I
know I am successful in the end? You can only really celebrate your success if you have answered this question in
the beginning.

Make it
Compelling: Now let’s loop back to my first point, which is that you really
have to care about doing the work to
achieve your goal. You can’t do it for your spouse, your kids, your dad, or
anyone else, no matter how much you care about them. So, choose something you really, really want. It doesn’t matter
if it isn’t a big deal to anyone else, or if it isn’t going to make you a
better person. If you really care, there is a chance you will succeed.

I will leave you now so that I
can decide how to be nicer, more productive, a more patient mom, a more
inspiring boss, thinner, healthier, and a more committed recycler. I only wish
I were kidding.

Here’s to miracles for all of us
in the New Year!

Love, Madeleine

PS. I was kidding. Kind of. But seriously, my big goal in 2019 is for this “Ask Madeleine” column to be more widely read. So I am asking for your support. If you like my column, please share it every week with three (3) other people whom you think would like it. Thank you so much!

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I always get a little overwhelmed
during the holiday season, but this year I am at the brink. I have a big team
at work and I usually try to create some kind of fun event for us—but this year
it just isn’t happening. There is a massive problem with our technology and my
team and I are having a hard time doing our jobs. My printer stopped working
and so did the key card I use to go from building to building. Two of my people
are out sick and another needs to be talked off the ledge every hour on the
hour.

In my personal life, my car’s check
engine light is on and my mechanic won’t return my calls. My dryer at home is
broken, and I have two kids coming home from college with suitcases full of
laundry. Our Christmas tree is up, but it isn’t decorated, and I usually have the
house all ready for the kids. I haven’t even ordered Christmas cards, let alone
sent any! The dog is limping for some unknown reason and the cat keeps throwing
up on my bed.

I just got off the phone with a
colleague who told me that one of my direct reports dropped a big ball and
really screwed up. I am this close to
picking up the phone and letting my direct report have it, but I know it wasn’t
really his fault. So I am writing you instead.

I feel like everyone and
everything is letting me down and I am pushing a huge rock uphill by myself. I
can’t even think anymore. Help?

Melting Down

______________________________________________________________

Dear Melting Down,

Oh my dear, this sounds hard. And
so familiar. When you start feeling sorry for yourself, it is time to stop. Just
stop. Take a deep breath. Say out loud: “This is not neurosurgery, no one is
dying.” Repeat three times.

Once you have your lists—one for
work and one for home—look at each item one by one. Decide whether you are
going to deal with it, dump (ignore) it, or delegate it. Some things are simply
outside of your control and you will just have to suck them up. Others you can either
do something about yourself or get others to handle.

Before you get to it, though, you
need to consider your standards—your expectations of yourself and others based
on both what you think is important and marks you have hit in the past. Remember:
standards are not laws. Gravity is a law. I
must have the tree decorated by the time the kids come home is not. Do you see
the difference? You have made up that some of the standards you hold yourself to are a
priority—when, in fact, your reality
is making them impossible. For right now, as you go over your list of
tolerations, ask yourself where can I
lower my standards, just for this year? I remember one year when I was similarly
overextended, I just didn’t do Christmas cards. My sister-in-law was horrified—but
you know what? Nobody died.

So lower your
standards and your expectations of how things should be. Deal with the real
problems—like your car—the ones that won’t resolve themselves and will probably
turn into bigger, more expensive problems. Find a new mechanic. If the dog is
still limping, make a vet appointment. Assuming the cat is feeling better, close
the door to your bedroom just in case.

Let the kids
decorate the tree when they get home and take their clothes to the laundromat.
Send them a warm text to explain your situation and to warn them so they aren’t
surprised. They may moan, but they will also probably rise to the occasion—especially
if you manage their expectations. Send
a nice email to your work team thanking them for their hard work and promising
a fun event in February—which, honestly, is when people really need one. The technology
problems will resolve themselves eventually, and you aren’t going to get fired.

Tom Magliozzi, one of the co-hosts
of NPR’s Car Talk show, says:
“Happiness equals reality minus expectations.” Deal with the
incontrovertible reality, and remember the rest is all made up. Be the model of
grace, humor, generosity, and patience you know yourself to be, especially with
your team. Keep breathing. Your kids and you will be fine.

I wish you great peace, healthy
pets, a functioning car, and upgraded technology in the New Year.

Love, Madeleine

* Thomas Leonard, a pioneer of the coaching profession and the founder of Coach University, the ICF, and Coachville, coined the term tolerations in the late 1980s.

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

As we wrap up season one of the LeaderChat Podcast, Ken Blanchard and Chad Gordon revisit some of their favorite episodes. They share new thoughts about the important messages from our guests and invite you to send questions you would like Ken to answer in future episodes. Just send your questions to podcast@kenblanchard.com.

Enjoy this episode of Chad Gordon interviewing Patrick Lencioni, author of The Ideal Team Player as well as nine other books on teams and motivation—which have sold nearly five million copies! Lencioni describes leadership as a calling that requires putting the needs of others ahead of your own. That begins with identifying people with the right qualities and developing those qualities to the fullest extent.

Building on the concepts he first explored in his best-selling first book, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, Lencioni recommends taking a moment to consider your own behaviors when working on a team. He teaches how using a Humble—Hungry—Smart model can help you and others become more effective team members.

Lencioni shares how leadership development experts can identify these traits in potential new hires along with sharing his own personal story of using these principles in his work and other areas of his life.

Be sure to listen to the very end of this 30-minute interview to hear Ken Blanchard share his key takeaways and the areas that he most plans to work on.

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book,& The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I have a good relationship with my boss. We communicate well and I admire him a lot. Over the last two years, he’s the one who has helped me learn the job and tackle problems.

This great connection has caused all kinds of issues I hadn’t anticipated, however. My coworkers seem to think that he supports me in every situation. People say my success is due exclusively to my relationship with the boss, and no one recognizes my hard work.

To add to my troubles, I am a little bit brash. I tend to be loud and probably a little too direct. I speak out when I feel something isn’t right.

I have resigned from my current employer and am moving on to a new opportunity. I don’t want to leave on a bad note and I definitely don’t want to recreate the same situation in my next job.

Teacher’s Pet

Dear Teacher’s Pet,

Congratulations for being able to build such a great relationship with your boss. That is a useful skill. The trick, of course, is to have a great relationship with your boss, your peers, and—as you eventually get promoted—your own direct reports.

The concept that will be helpful for you right now is Emotional Intelligence. Emotional Intelligence refers to the extent to which you are aware of yourself, aware of others, and able to regulate your own behavior to work more effectively with others. Some wonderful books have been written on the topic, including Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman, and Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves.

You will benefit a great deal from applying your ambition and desire toward successfully increasing all the above. Otherwise, you are going to continue to crash around and turn people off, which will hurt you professionally.

I can totally relate, by the way—having spent most of my life being described as a bull in a china shop. Brash, loud, direct, and straightforward describes me to a T. I have worked relentlessly to learn to self-regulate. After forty years in the workforce, I still have to put a lot of attention into moderating my natural way of being. It is difficult and sometimes tiring but my efforts have paid off.

Take it from me—honing your Emotional Intelligence is worth it, primarily because you really won’t be able to make a true impact all by yourself. To make a difference in the world you need to be able to work with others and inspire others to do their best. All the research on successful people shows that the ability to build and nurture relationships with people at all levels of the organization is the key to success.

This notion is often challenged by examples of Steve Jobs and Elon Musk—not exactly Emotional Intelligence role models. If you are as big a genius as those guys, then go ahead and ignore me. But if you are just a regular, smart, hardworking, fundamentally decent person who wants a great career, your Emotional Intelligence will matter as much as your intellectual intelligence.

I know you are already on your way—you at least noticed that your way of being hasn’t been working. So as your start your new gig, keep your ears open and your mouth shut until you get to know people a little bit.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

It is my experience though, that regardless of temperament, most people have a deep need to be seen and heard—maybe not you, but most people. Your people want you to know who they are and they want you to care about them. You claim that you don’t care, but since they continue to come to you, you must be faking it pretty well.

My assessment is this: you have the instinct that it is important to spend time with your people and listen to them, which is correct—but you haven’t figured out how to draw boundaries that will limit the amount of your time people take. So it’s time to set some boundaries.

Tell your people that from now on, everyone gets a specific amount of one-on-one time. Some managers have so many direct reports that they can only spend 15 minutes a week with each person, but the ideal is 30 minutes, and an hour is even better. Tell them that their one-on-one time is their time. They should prepare the agenda and they should use their time to bring you up to speed, get the direction they need from you on their work, and plan future projects. Let people know they are invited to share about their personal lives, but they need to fit it all into their one-on-one time. They will get the message loud and clear, and you will have tight boundaries around your time.

Your people clearly crave personal connection with you, and they obviously trust you enough to seek your ear. You can give them what they need and also take care of your own desire to get on with it. Keep working on the amount of time until you reach a comfortable balance. With the right balance, you will find it easier to access the part of you that actually does care—which will meet your needs as well as theirs.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/12/08/tired-of-listening-to-your-direct-reports-ask-madeleine/feed/011824New eBook Available: Measuring the Impact and ROI of Leadership Traininghttps://leaderchat.org/2018/12/06/new-ebook-available-measuring-the-impact-and-roi-of-leadership-training/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/12/06/new-ebook-available-measuring-the-impact-and-roi-of-leadership-training/#respondThu, 06 Dec 2018 11:45:07 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11814One of the biggest challenges leadership, learning, and talent development professionals face when they propose a new training and development program is convincing senior executives of the positive financial impact of the proposed initiative. Without a compelling presentation from L&D managers, it is easy for executive leaders to dismiss a new proposal as being too disruptive, too expensive, or too time consuming.

Measuring the Impact and ROI of Leadership Training, a new ebook just published by The Ken Blanchard Companies, shows how training and development professionals can calculate an estimated return on a proposed training initiative by looking at the bottom-line impact of better leadership in three areas: employee retention, customer satisfaction, and employee productivity. Utilizing Blanchard’s ROI methodology, readers will be able to demonstrate that leadership development programs produce a return on investment of at least 8:1 after program participants adopt new skills.

Better leadership practices improve customer satisfaction scores by up to three percentage points—the equivalent of 1 percent of annual sales. That equals $1 million in increased revenue for companies with $100 million in sales.

The largest benefit of better leadership skills is improved employee productivity. Citing a case study with a large financial service firm, the ebook identifies that better leadership practices can generate productivity improvement of between 5 and 12 percent. When calculated as a percentage of annual payroll using the same $100 million dollar company, that’s an amount equal to at least $2 million per year!

According to the new ebook, leadership training generates a large return on investment because of the multiplier effect. When organizations train one manager, it creates an improved work environment for seven or more individual contributors who report to that manager.

Leadership, learning, and talent development professionals who want to learn more about calculating the impact of their proposed training initiatives can download the on-demand ebook from The Ken Blanchard Companies for free! Use this link: Measuring the Impact and ROI of Leadership Training.

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/12/06/new-ebook-available-measuring-the-impact-and-roi-of-leadership-training/feed/011814Are You Taking the Time to Connect? A Coach’s Storyhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/12/04/are-you-taking-the-time-to-connect-a-coachs-story/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/12/04/are-you-taking-the-time-to-connect-a-coachs-story/#commentsTue, 04 Dec 2018 11:45:43 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11808When you are a coach who works with leaders from all walks of life, you begin to notice patterns. One pattern I’ve noticed is that about one-third of the leaders I work with consider connecting and building relationships a part of their job, while the other two-thirds do not. This second group of leaders generally feels that they should spend most of their time focused on executing—getting work done and marking tasks off their list.

Left to my own natural tendencies, I’m part of the second group. When I’m chatting with a coworker or hanging out by the proverbial water cooler, after about five minutes I get the itch to get back to my “real” work.

But over the years I’ve recognized that in most cases, the most successful leaders are the ones who are all about building connections.

Several years ago, I spent a week working at our local sports arena during the Davis Cup tennis tournament. We were told parking at the arena would be limited, so I carpooled with a coworker named Dan. Turns out Dan had once worked at the arena and still knew a lot of the staff.

The first two days of work were spent preparing for the main event. Dan was able to park in front in a VIP section. Every day when we got there, Dan would stop and chat with different parking attendants about their work and life. Dan had obtained several Davis Cup commemorative pins that were very sought after, and he made sure to give a pin to each of the attendants he talked with. I noticed what Dan was doing but could only think about how I wanted to get inside and start working.

On the third day, the crowds increased and the parking lot was quite full. As Dan drove into the VIP section, a parking attendant he didn’t know told him he didn’t have the right credentials to park there. Another attendant immediately ran up to tell the first attendant it was okay. We parked in the VIP section each day for the rest of the tournament.

I never got the impression that Dan was chatting with the attendants and giving them the pins only to secure VIP parking. To me, this story is a concrete example of the power of connection.

Think you could use a little more connection in your life? Here are three ways to get started:

See building connections as a valuable part of your job. I mentioned to one very successful senior leader I coached that it sounded like she spent half her time building relationships. She agreed, but then said it really should be 90 percent of her time!

Regularly get up and away from your computer or other electronic devices. Go hang out by the coffee cart, invite someone to walk with you to the vending machines, drop by to say hi to a colleague, or—for the very brave—schedule some lunches. Although initiating contact might not feel natural, most people find it to be a pleasant experience.

Listen more than you talk. I don’t think it’s an accident that many people who don’t regularly connect happen to be introverted—maybe even shy. The reality is that building connections often means listening to those you are connecting with. If you are a generally shy person, think up a couple of questions you can ask, if you need to, to start a conversation. Ask a question such as ”How was your weekend?” or “Did you see the big game?” And then just listen.

With a little practice, you can learn to be a master at connecting, too!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

Earlier this year I joined a consulting firm that works with companies in my previous industry. I had taken a break to get a management degree and got a taste of consulting doing an internship that was part of my program.

I believed consulting would be a different world where I would learn a lot—but now, seven months in, I recognize that I learned a lot more five years ago when I started my career as an entry level employee.

My workload isn’t interesting or challenging. My peers are all younger than me, and all they do is complain about their jobs and bad mouth others. And when I told my supervisor how I feel about my job during my midyear review, she didn’t seem to care.

I’ve always had opportunities in the past to work with people my own age or older—people I could learn from who knew more than I did. I’m worried that I’m stuck in the wrong job and that it will negate the five years’ experience I had when I came here.

Please help!

Feeling Stuck

Dear Feeling Stuck,

Everyone is motivated to work for various reasons—the need to pay the bills is usually number one. But it is clear that you deeply value a safe and collegial working environment. A learning environment, challenging work, and adding value also seem to be very important to you.

It sounds like you are not going to get any of those where you are now. But you are only “stuck” if you are being held hostage. It doesn’t sound like that’s the case, so … go! Go as soon as you can. You haven’t let so much time go by that you have lost the value of your previous stint. In fact, you might think about going back to your old company, perhaps this time in a management position.

Honor your own experience and instincts. Find yourself a job where you can excel and a working environment that brings out the best in people.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

As we wrap up season one of the LeaderChat Podcast, Ken Blanchard and Chad Gordon revisit some of their favorite episodes. They share new thoughts about the important messages from our guests and invite you to send questions you would like Ken to answer in future episodes. Just send your questions to podcast@kenblanchard.com.

“Most ideals about why people are successful are driven by stereotypes and gut feel rather than facts and data,” explains Botelho. “In this book, we’ve aspired to provide information about how anyone can be successful by helping readers learn from other successful people in business.”

Learnings shared in the book are based on groundbreaking research and in-depth analysis of more than 2,600 leaders drawn from a database of more than 17,000 CEO and C-suite executives. Botelho describes the four behaviors of highly successful people as identified by the research.

They are decisive and understand the importance of speed over precision when making decisions. According to Botelho, most people assume that CEOs have an uncanny ability to make the right decisions more often than other people. But her research indicates that what really makes a CEO stand out isn’t necessarily the accuracy of their decision, but the speed and will to make the decision in the first place.

They are reliable and deliver what they promise, when they promise it—without exception. This behavior sounds simple, but isn’t easy to practice consistently. Botelho describes the importance of being on time and doing what you say you’re going to do—and she offers another tip: “Highly reliable leaders are thoughtful about setting expectations right up front.” Botelho shares that this behavior not only improves the likelihood you will succeed in your role, but also increases your chances of being hired In the first place.

They adapt boldly, especially when faced with the discomfort of the unknown. “Of the four behaviors, this is the one where people are most likely to underestimate their ability—and that is costly.” Botelho explains people naturally assume change will be painful, so they resist it. But her research shows that the most successful leaders are good at letting go of past behaviors, habits, and commitments that will not serve them in the future.

They engage with stakeholders without shying away from conflict. These leaders focus on leading to deliver results that benefit the company as opposed to leading to be liked. They keep all stakeholders—customers, employees, and shareholders—in mind and manage those relationships.

Finally, Botelho shares some counterintuitive insights about making great strides in your career—what she calls career catapults. “Sometimes it is better to go small in order to go big,” Botelho says. Having an elite MBA or working for a marque company is a great way to advance your career, but sometimes taking what looks like a side step instead of always focusing on moving up the ladder can have a more positive impact. By being in charge of a smaller project, division, or group, you might actually have a chance to practice more skills and get more exposure.

According to the author, here is the most important message to take away from The CEO Next Door and this podcast: Excellence is more achievable for us than we assume.

Be sure to stay tuned for comments from Ken Blanchard at the end of the podcast!

]]>117972019 Learning & Development Trends—10 Expert Predictionshttps://leaderchat.org/2018/11/27/2019-learning-development-trends-10-expert-predictions/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/11/27/2019-learning-development-trends-10-expert-predictions/#commentsTue, 27 Nov 2018 14:25:18 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11734 2019 is right around the corner. What are the top issues leadership, learning, and talent development professionals will be facing in the coming year?

10 industry experts have identified some of the key trends that will be influencing strategies—read on to see how they might impact your organization’s planned initiatives.

Each trend includes a link to its full original article—be sure to click for the full story. And don’t miss the opportunity to join us for a free Trends Webinar—details after trend #10!

The coexistence of workers and Artificial Intelligence (AI)

A recent Gartner survey found that 59 percent of organizations are in the research stage of building out their AI plans while the rest are either piloting or adopting AI solutions.

The global workforce may have a reasonable fear that the introduction of AI will eliminate jobs from the economy. Nevertheless, next generation workers will eventually have to work side by side with these technologies in order to become more productive and free up time to do emotional labor, says Dan Schawbel, New York Times bestselling author and partner/research director at Future Workplace.

“There are many conflicting reports about robots having a net positive, neutral, or negative effect on the labor market. The one certainty is that the workforce is getting incrementally used to both using and communicating with robots in and out of the workplace, whether they realize it or not.

“We use voice technology outside the workplace, such as Alexa and Siri, so we are more likely to desire the same technology in the workplace,” says Schawbel. “Companies are starting to implement AI in order to add to the human experience.”

A shocking 94 percent of workers are stressed out at work, with 33 percent reporting that their level of stress is “high to unsustainably high,” which impacts their health and productivity. Schawbel notes that, in the same study, more than 50 percent of employees say work stress impacts their home life at least once each week. In response to these accounts of high stress and anxiety, which can lead to burnout and high turnover, companies are investing in mindfulness programs for their people.

“Mindfulness and meditation is set to become a $2.08 billion industry by 2022, with an annual growth rate of 11.4 percent,” says Schawbel. “McKinsey, Nike, Google, P&G, Intel, Adobe, Apple, and General Mills have already implemented programs for employees.” Schawbel cites a seven-week employee mindfulness and meditation program hosted by General Mills. Results of their post-program survey show 83 percent of participants taking time every day to optimize their productivity, 80 percent of senior executives improving their decision making process, and 89 percent becoming better listeners. According to Schawbel, there is clear demand for mindfulness solutions and apps such as Insight Timer, Headspace, and Calm, many of which have already amassed millions of users.

In their 2019 Human Capital Management Trends report, authors Ben Eubanks and Trish McFarlane point to how large organizations such as GE, IBM, DXC, and Dutch Royal Shell are beginning to focus on elements of jobs, such as specific skills, instead of looking at jobs as whole chunks. These companies examine the granular skill sets of the workforce to improve their understanding of how best to place people into available roles.

“In tight labor markets, employers must find ways to keep their people engaged. Development consistently shows up as one of the top items for driving employee engagement and retention,” says Eubanks. He adds that as new technology solutions have entered the market to help employers better utilize existing employees, more companies are balancing outsourcing with insourcing by using available internal talent to do project-based work.

“We are now seeing technologies with the ability to connect employees and skills in a way they have never been connected before,” adds McFarlane. “Watch for companies like ProFinda in this area. They are one example of how technology can map a new hire’s skills, expertise, and knowledge and follow those as the employee progresses and is looking for challenging opportunities internally.”

In the same report, researcher George LaRocque identifies several initiatives where learning content and capabilities are being offered externally, particularly for entry-level and more junior-level positions, to candidates who identify themselves with interest in a career path but lack core skills to qualify for a job.

According to LaRocque, by providing access to learning content incrementally, employers are not just investing in the training of a new candidate and the development of a candidate pool, they are also getting a glimpse of candidates’ individual levels of commitment. Some may be worthy of consideration for internships, apprenticeships, or employment in areas that offer a ladder to their desired career path. “This investment by employers and staffing solution providers [in] the general talent pool is an incredible opportunity to positively impact both the employer’s brand and the candidate experience.”

More companies will focus on making sure they attract, hire, and retain people who really understand their business. Matthew Hamilton, people partner at Neueda, says, “One of the best ways to do this is by getting your company values and ethos into the public domain. This allows applicants to either select or deselect themselves by getting a better idea of what it is you do and, more importantly, how you do it.

“Not every applicant is going to be thrilled by lots of teamwork and collaboration, for example, so if your organization promotes a high degree of this style of working, make sure that message gets across.” Hamilton says self-aware candidates, especially, will think carefully about their organizational fit before applying.

Robotics quotient (RQ) will be a core learning and measurement fundamental for people working alongside digital workers and artificial intelligence, says Priya Sunil, journalist at Human Resources Online.

Sunil shares Forrester research that 2019 will be the year where transformation in the business world will go pragmatic to address the scarcity of available talent in the area of harnessing the power of robots.

“You don’t pick talent anymore,” says Kristina Martic in a recent article for TalentLyft. “Talent picks you.” This change of paradigm brings a whole new set of challenges and recruiting trends.

The current job market is 90 percent candidate driven. Research by LinkedIn states that more than 75 percent of job seekers now investigate a company’s reputation and brand as an employer before applying. Companies with poor reputations struggle to not only attract candidates but also retain employees.

Martic says to look for companies to begin “recruitment marketing”—the process of nurturing and attracting talented individuals using marketing methods and tactics. “Your goal in inbound recruiting is to attract, convert, and engage candidates.”

According to Terry Salo, senior HR consultant at strategicHRinc.com, the issue of equal pay and unconscious bias will continue to impact the workplace in 2019—and will require HR professionals and business leaders to stay ahead of the curve.

A recent Harvard Global Online Research study that included more than 200,000 participants reports that 76 percent of people—both men and women—are gender biased and tend to think of men as better suited for careers and women as better suited for homemakers.

Gender bias—and numerous other unconscious biases—spill over into the workplace every day. Look for more companies to implement employee training programs to show how bias can affect the success of employees as well as organizations.

“The percentage of companies using predictive analytics and advanced reporting has nearly doubled since 2014,” says Adam Rogers, CTO of Ultimate Software. “I expect to see predictive functionalities in future recruiting and learning platforms. I’m also excited about analytical benchmarking, where organizations can compare themselves to their peers and competitors in terms of L&D spending, recruiting, organizational design, and other talent measures.”

Virtual reality is the next frontier of employee training, adds Rogers. “Think about flight simulators. It’s far too dangerous and expensive to risk training pilots in real airplanes, so they train repeatedly in these digital simulations, honing their muscle memory and ingrained reactions.

“This is essentially what VR can bring to everyday corporate training. These simulations may not be necessary for every role, but many organizations will benefit from the opportunity to teach employees how to handle crucial, hard-to-replicate scenarios such as managing unruly Black Friday crowds or containing and disposing of hazardous substances.”

Employees today are used to YouTube and Netflix algorithms that provide content based on their consumer behavior and viewing patterns. If you want to engage them on their level you need to start doing the same, say researchers at Knowledge City Learning Solutions.

To do this, you can either provide training materials on platforms like YouTube that already use these algorithms or build similar ones into your current digital training materials to customize learner experiences based on levels of engagement.

Industry expert Josh Bersin expands on this topic. “Remember, corporate learning is very different from music and TV. We don’t watch learning to be entertained; we watch it to really learn something. We don’t want people to [become] addicted to the learning platform—we want them to learn something, apply it, and then go back to work.

“What we ultimately want to do is embed learning into the platform in which [people] work, so the systems can coach and train [them] to be better on the job.”

Bersin believes that by providing the principles of spaced learning, designed repetition, practice, and competency-driven recommendations, tools like Salesforce, Slack, and even Outlook can deliver conversational interfaces right into employees’ work environment.

2019 looks to be an exciting year with technology advances, a tight labor market, and an increased need for skill development-shaping plans and strategies. What about you? What are your plans for 2019? Please share them by taking the 2019 HR/L&D Trend Survey. It’s a short, three-minute survey—and all participants will receive a copy of the results when they are published on December 13 as a part of the webinar below.

2019 Leadership, Learning, and Talent Development Trends

Thursday, December 13, 2018, at 9:00 a.m. Pacific Time

In this free webinar, Blanchard program director David Witt will share the results of The Ken Blanchard Companies’ 2019 HR/L&D Trend Survey. Witt will detail responses received from leadership, learning, and talent development professionals who participated in the November trend survey to identify the #1 new initiative L&D professionals anticipate addressing in 2019.

Attend the webinar and see how your planned initiatives stack up against those of your peers! Together with L&D professionals from around the world, you’ll learn:

The #1 new L&D initiative identified for 2019

Other top initiatives and how they rank order against existing priorities

How to build a business case and present your recommended solution for budget approval

Don’t miss this opportunity to learn what your peers are focusing on for 2019 and how to get funding for your initiative.

I am serious person. I was a serious child, raised by very thoughtful and serious immigrant parents. I have always had high expectations and standards for myself.

I am now a manager of a large group of people and I am continually frustrated that almost none of them live up to my expectations. The typos in people’s emails make me tense and it is almost impossible for me to point out the mistakes without being mean.

I am in a constant state of agitation, with an equal amount of energy going into self-regulation. I know I should let people be themselves and be more accepting, and that most errors ultimately don’t really matter.

I am trying to be more at peace, and in fact, I have started a mindfulness program. But I keep circling back to taking it personally when my people turn in substandard work or miss deadlines.

How can I stop being so rigid?

Too Serious

Dear Too Serious,

You are who you are. It’s a combination of nature and nurture—and no matter how hard you try, you are not going to achieve a personality transplant. I know. I have been trying my entire conscious life.

Your foray into mindfulness training is an excellent step. Mindfulness is defined by researchers as “self-regulation of attention so that it is maintained on immediate experience thereby allowing for increased recognition of mental events in the present moment,” and “adopting a particular orientation toward one’s experiences in the present moment, an orientation that is characterized by curiosity, openness, and acceptance.” *

The practice of curiosity, openness, and acceptance will help you to relax a little bit. However, you are still going to wake up tomorrow and be yourself. So here is another idea.

Clearly, thoroughly, and honestly, share with your people who you are, what you expect from them, and what they can expect from you.

At our company we call this sharing your Leadership Point of View (LPoV). In essence, it is an examination of your leadership values—the values that inform your standards for yourself and others. These often come from your parent role models, but also from the observation of leaders you admire and from your own life experiences.

In your LPoV you tell the very human stories that explain and give context for your leadership standards. This information will help your people to understand you better and to know what your rules are. Almost everybody wants to make their boss happy, so giving them the very clear roadmap of how to do that is usually appreciated.

The act of creating your Leadership Point of View will help you to define, for yourself and others, what you will insist on and where you are willing to let things slide. You already know which battles aren’t worth fighting. Making it explicit for yourself will help you choose when to give feedback and when it just doesn’t matter.

When you present your LPoV, you share these expectations explicitly. Right now, your expectations are probably mostly implicit, and you are hoping your people will read your mind.

Instead, spell it out. For example, as surmised from your message to me, you could share:

I expect all written communication to be well organized and free of errors.

I expect all team members to meet deadlines, or, if this is not possible, to re-negotiate deadlines before the actual deadline.

Our coaches and I have worked on LPoV with countless clients and it makes a big difference for them. I use it myself and I share it in writing whenever I onboard a new employee. It will feel very risky to you, but do it.

On the topic of taking things personally, I am reminded of a book by Don Miguel Ruiz titled The Four Agreements. It is essentially a code of conduct based on ancient Toltec wisdom that can help to unwind deep seated self-limiting beliefs. In short, the Four Agreements are:

Be impeccable with your word.

Don’t take anything personally.

Don’t make assumptions.

Always do your best.

You are probably already impeccable with your word, and clearly doing your best. However, you are taking too much personally, and you are almost certainly making assumptions.

Mr. Ruiz’s prescription for not taking things personally starts with a reminder that nothing is actually about you. You might share this book with your team and encourage discussion about it. A lot could change if everyone on the team agreed to use the Four Agreements as a guide.

In the meantime, keep up that mindfulness training, and breathe. Next time you are annoyed at someone around you acting like the human being they are, just take a deep breath in and let it out slowly.

Craft and share your LPoV. Let your people in on how hard it is to be you. Be clear about your standards. Be persistent with holding them to your standards but also be curious, generous, and kind. They will come around.

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

As we wrap up Season 1 of the Blanchard LeaderChat Podcast, Ken Blanchard and Chad Gordon revisit some of their favorite episodes. They share new thoughts about the important messages from our guests and invite you to send questions you would like Ken to answer in future episodes. Just send your questions to podcast@kenblanchard.com.

Dr. Goldsmith discusses the environmental and psychological triggers that can derail us at work and in life, and what we can do about them.

Drawing on years of experience coaching top executives, Goldsmith gives us an inside look at how to achieve change in our lives. He discusses the unique challenges top executives face and shares the number one reason people don’t act on their good intentions. He also offers six questions we can ask ourselves every day to help us stay on track and begin to find alternatives to instinctive impulse-response behavior patterns.

Goldsmith explains how we can open up new possibilities by planning in advance, avoiding negative triggers when possible, and adjusting our behavior when triggers are unavoidable. He also offers great advice on how to add a little structure to our lives that allows us to be our best.

Be sure to listen to the very end of this 30-minute interview to hear Ken Blanchard share his thoughts and personal takeaways from the concepts discussed.

About The Ken Blanchard Companies
The Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I spent a decade of my career at a very sexy, high profile tech company and rose to a senior position. I worked 24/7 and my commute was a horror show. When my kids were little, my husband was traveling a lot for his job, and things started fraying around the edges, I decided to dial things back. I found a great position—a demotion—in a much smaller, not-at-all-sexy company. It took me a while to get used to a slower pace and a much more conforming, less creative culture. They have been doing things the same way here forever, and one of the reasons I was brought in was to pull us into the twenty-first century. I feel like I have finally settled in and am now doing really interesting and exciting things in my job.

My problem is one colleague.

She is at the same level as I am—a peer, essentially—but she has been at this company forever and doesn’t have much experience out in the modern world. I need to collaborate with her to accomplish my goals. I’ve tried several approaches, but she has literally ignored my emails, not returned my calls, and made herself inaccessible. I know she screens my calls and doesn’t pick up when she sees it’s me.

I’ve never had a problem creating relationships before now. I’ve always found a way to get along with everyone, even if it was hard. I finally came out and asked her what I was doing to cause her to be so hostile to me. I was shocked when she told me, straight out, that she is jealous of me—and therefore doesn’t like me and is committed to not working with me! She added that it was nothing personal and there was nothing I could do about it.

I was speechless. It would be one thing if she was unconscious about why she didn’t like me—that, I would understand. But how can someone just be okay with admitting to envy and accept that it’s okay to sabotage entire work projects because of it? It seems so childish and pathetic.

The worst thing is, I have no idea what to do now.

Green Eyed Monster at My Door

Dear GEM@MD,

Wow. This is a new one. Just when I think I can no longer be surprised by how frail and small human beings can be, I am as stunned as you are. I have often worked with folks who have had a badly behaved, envious colleague who seems to be unconscious of their motivations. But I agree—to be fully aware and conscious of such a low motive, and then consciously choose bad behavior and admit to it seems beyond the pale!

I immediately stooped to being as small and awful as your Green Eyed Monster—my first thought was that you should pour Elmer’s glue on her computer keyboard. But fun as that might be, it will not solve your problem. I had to go out to my advisory team* on this one, because I was stumped. Responses were quite varied, but I was not alone in my childish “glue on the keyboard” reflex.

Margie Blanchard wanted to know if you have a boss, and if there was any reason you couldn’t get some help there. She said: “Generally, I haven’t seen situations like this one resolve themselves and they can be very toxic to colleagues. This is why bosses exist.” My thought is that you probably don’t want to involve your boss unless you absolutely must, and you are trying to figure out how to deal with this yourself. To that end, the Blanchard Coaching Services team consensus is well summed up by Patricia Overland. We call this the “kill her with kindness and make her love you despite herself” approach.

Always take the high road. Continue to invite—but not wait for—collaboration.

Make your advocates aware. Don’t necessarily spill the beans about the conversation, but do ask for some advice on how you might engage the jealous person.

Ask the person to imagine a situation where the two of you were working together incredibly well to create something spectacular. What would that look like? Then work to co-create that reality. (This one takes some Emotional Intelligence that the jealous person might not have, but it’s worth a shot!)

If all else fails, don’t stop being fabulous. Make visible your intent to include and collaborate and find small ways to give the other person some credit, if possible.

This is a relationship that will take time to build. Start small, build trust, and keep at it.

My approach would be to just plow ahead and tell the truth: go around her, above her, or below her to get done what you need to get done. If anyone asks why you are going about your business that way, tell the truth. Say, “Oh, Marci won’t work with me, but I have to carry on despite that.” No blame, no judgment, just a statement of fact.

When in doubt, it never hurts to take the highest possible road. No matter what happens, you will always know you did the right thing, did your best, and were the bigger person.

And if you do put glue on her keyboard, please don’t tell anyone it was my idea.

Love, Madeleine

*The unofficial Ask Madeleine Advisory Team is made up of the staff of Blanchard Coaching Services (Patricia Overland, Terry Watkins, Mary Ellen Sailer, Joanne Maynard, and Sally Smith), my sister, Mia Homan, and my mother-in-law, Margie Blanchard. My husband, Scott Blanchard, is also consulted on a regular basis but never gets any credit.

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I lead a team in a large organization. I stepped in as an interim leader when my boss went out on leave—but he never came back.

At this point, my challenge is that I need to delegate more and make people on my team do the stuff they should be doing. I have managed to get by for the last eighteen months by doing much of the work myself—but I can’t keep this up. How do I change the dynamic that I have inadvertently set up here? My people are happy and comfortable with the way things are.

Where do I begin? I’ve never had any training but have been reading a lot and watching videos on leadership. I need more. Help!

Victim of My Own Ignorance

Dear Victim,

I love that you are taking responsibility for your circumstances, but this isn’t all your fault. Your organization has also helped create the situation by offering you zero guidance and support. You are not alone. Most people who find themselves managing others are in a sink-or-swim scenario and learn by trial and error. You, for now at least, seem to be swimming—so you have that going for you. You also are clear about the error you have made in taking over tasks you should have delegated to others.

I think the only way to go at this is by coming clean with your whole team. Pull everyone together and explain what you have told me here: the situation, as it currently stands, is unsustainable for you and you all need to work together to change it. Tell them you need to do a job review with each team member and hand back all tasks that don’t belong to you. Don’t call anyone out in front of the group or place blame. You need to be as clear with the group as you have been with me about how you helped create the situation; just keep it general. Then have a one-on-one meeting with each individual to go over their tasks and goals, with a specific focus on anything you are currently doing that they need to take back. You can offer clear direction and lots of support as needed to help the person work the task back onto their own to-do list. You can also share what your tasks will continue to be, so there is crystal clarity all round.

Be clear that your job is to be available to help, not to actually do the job yourself. This approach will help you build a much more well-rounded team and offer everyone else development opportunities—not to mention that it will keep you from becoming resentful and potentially burning out.

You can do this!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

People with high emotional intelligence are able to recognize emotions that surface within themselves and others. Emotional intelligence, also known as emotional quotient or EQ, refers to a person’s ability to identify and understand their own emotions and the emotions of other people.

To your knowledge, have you ever interacted with a person with low EQ? If you have, it’s safe to say the interaction may not have been very pleasant or productive.

Coaching sessions often focus, directly or indirectly, on emotional intelligence. A coach helps a leader surface and recognize the emotions that result in the behaviors that are driving them. A leader who can measure the effectiveness of their behaviors and manage those emotions can create appropriate and productive leadership behaviors for themselves.

The skills involved in most emotional intelligence models include the following:

Self-Awareness: This is where it begins! Being self-aware. Using your personal power.

Self-Management: Being in control of your behaviors based on your emotions. Self-regulation.

Social or Other Awareness: Being aware of others’ emotions. Showing empathy and being service oriented.

Daniel Goleman, author of many books on EQ including Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, highlights a study that determined people with high EQ have better mental health, job performance, and lives. Goleman states: “In a study of skills that distinguish star performers in every field, from entry-level jobs to executive positions, the single most important factor was not IQ, advanced degrees, or technical experience—it was EQ. Of the competencies required for excellence in performance in the job studies, 67 percent were emotional competencies.”

EQ is about adapting your behaviors and leadership styles to create productive interactions. This is at the core of effective leadership. Everyone experiences good days, bad days, positive moods, “just don’t feel like it” moods, tiredness, low motivation, etc. We are human and mood swings come naturally. And we have the ability to manage how we act on our emotions and how we deal with the emotions of others.

With some coaching and a little practice, anyone can increase their level of emotional intelligence and positively impact their relationships at home and in the workplace.

About the Author

Terry Watkins is a coaching solutions partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

“If we as leadership, learning, and development professionals can’t answer that question with an enthusiastic yes, we’re all in trouble,” says Dr. Paul Leone, ROI expert at Verizon and author of the book Measuring and Maximizing Training Impact: Bridging the Gap between Training and Business Results.

“The truth is, HR people don’t always know if training is working,” says Leone. “Often we ask for budget at the beginning of the year, but at the end of the year we aren’t able to show the training has had an impact on the bottom line. That’s not a good position to be in.

“Imagine how much better you would feel if you could go into meetings with senior leaders and stakeholders saying, ‘This time I have some data—and I can show that we are impacting the bottom line by X amount of dollars.’ I think that’s where we all want to be in the industry.”

The good news, according to Leone, is that you can demonstrate the impact of training if you know where to look, how to set up your initiative, and how to present your data.

“Begin with the end in mind,” says Leone. “What are the leadership behaviors you want to impact and what is the benefit in terms of increased sales or productivity, decreased costs from better alignment or efficiencies, or improvements to the customer experience?

“Senior leaders want to know that the money they are spending on training is generating a good return on investment. If you don’t clearly identify the benefits along with the costs of training, it creates some pretty lopsided equations and makes it difficult to talk about ROI—because training is seen only as a cost. That’s a vulnerable position.”

Start Small and Be Conservative in Your Approach

For L&D professionals just getting started with measuring ROI, Leone suggests focusing on a small, manageable test case, such as a pilot study with a group of managers who have direct reports with easily quantifiable key performance indicators (KPI).

“Two things are important here,” says Leone. “First, remember that you are measuring the benefit of better leader behaviors by looking at the improvement in performance of that leader’s direct reports—that’s where the bottom-line impact will show up. For example, better leader behaviors from a call center manager will translate into better performance from that manager’s frontline associates. Better goal-setting and coaching skills from a sales manager will translate into better sales performance from that manager’s individual salespeople.”

“Second, choose managers whose direct reports have KPIs that are easier to convert into bottom line impact. Don’t try to quantify the impact of better research and development performance among a group of engineers as your first project. Choose a group where you can measure shorter-term impact and easily convert improved performance into dollars and cents.”

Use a Proven Model and Process

Leone also recommends using a proven approach such as the Phillips ROI model and the Kirkpatrick levels of change. He suggests focusing on levels 3, 4, and 5 in the Kirkpatrick model which cover leader behavior changes and bottom-line impact.

Leone uses a survey administered 90 days after training to measure perceived changes in manager behavior. To corroborate answers and provide a more airtight case when presenting evidence of changed behaviors to senior executives, Leone surveys both the managers who participated in the class and their direct reports.

“It’s important to not only ask the managers if they have changed their behavior, but also ask the direct reports if they have experienced changed behavior from their manager. This provides a corroborating data point.”

To isolate the impact of the changed behaviors on business performance, Leone recommends comparing the financial performance of the treatment group (the managers who went through the training) with a control group (similar managers in an identical business unit who have not yet gone through the training).

“Comparing the treatment group with a control group allows you to isolate the benefits of the training. When senior leaders know that everything else between the two groups is identical, they are more at ease attributing the improved performance to the training initiative.”

Keep the Presentation Simple for Best Results

Leone also has a tip for how to present the data to senior leaders: keep it simple!

“When I first began presenting data after graduate school, I thought it was necessary to show things like multiple regressions and multivariate analysis in my presentations. But in reality, it had the opposite effect. When I made my presentations more understandable, they started to go higher and higher in the organization.

“If you want to squash your story, throw in a lot of numbers and tables,” says Leone with a smile. “But if you want to push that story up the hierarchy to the highest levels, make it simple and it will get up there.”

Establish Credibility that Lasts and Builds Confidence

“The goal with your ROI presentations is to create credibility within the organization—where you can say, ‘If we are going to keep a program, we are going to run a pilot and we’ll measure it. If it’s great, we’ll scale it across the organization. If it’s not so great, we won’t.’ I can guarantee you that at some point in the very near future, someone is going to ask if a training worked. You will want a study and some data to show that it did.

“Remember, you don’t need to measure everything at first,” says Leone. “Go in and measure one or two programs and do it right. Once you get your foot in the door as a credible evaluator, you’ll have a much easier time securing budget in the future.”

Would you like to learn more about calculating ROI and measuring the impact of training? Join us for a free webinar!

Improving leadership skills is one of the best ways to impact your organization’s bottom line. Still, many leadership, learning, and talent development professionals struggle with both identifying the expected return on investment for training expenditures and measuring impact after an initiative.

In this webinar, David Witt, program director at The Ken Blanchard Companies, teams up with Dr. Paul Leone, author of Measuring and Maximizing Training Impact: Bridging the Gap between Training and Business Results to show you how to identify anticipated fiscal impact of a leadership training initiative and how to measure it in a cost-effective manner after the class has been conducted.

You’ll learn:

How to calculate the ROI for your leadership training initiative using Blanchard’s Leadership Training ROI Worksheet. (Worksheet provided to all registrants.)

How to measure the impact of training using the methodology outlined in Leone’s book Measuring and Maximizing Training Impact.

How to improve the adoption of new leadership practices from the classroom to the work environment.

Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how to quantify the impact of leadership training in proposals—and how to set up your training to deliver on expectations.

“Everyone wants to be happy,” says Neil Pasricha. “We were brought up to believe that if we worked hard we would have great success, and then we would be happy. But that just isn’t true.”

Pasricha shares research that indicates combining great work with success, doesn’t necessarily lead to happiness. In fact, it is the opposite. Being happy leads to great work, which leads to success. Coming to work with a positive mindset has been shown to increase productivity by 31 percent and sales by 37 percent. People who are happy are 40 percent more likely to get a promotion, and they live an average of 10 years longer than people with a negative mindset.

Pasricha believes that happiness is a choice, and he offers simple tips for leading a happier lifestyle. He suggests we spend 20 minutes each day doing one of the following:

Going for a walk outdoors in nature.

Journaling about our day.

Reading 20 pages of fiction. (It is important to read fiction rather than nonfiction, to develop our imagination.)

According to Pasricha, all three of these activities change the chemicals in our brain in a way that helps us develop a more positive mindset. His research reveals that happiness is 50 percent genetic, 10 percent influenced by circumstances, and 40 percent influenced by intentional action. He suggests we all focus on the 40 percent that we can manage.

“I know what has worked for me and ask that you consider a few things. First, take care of yourself. Stop watching and reading the news. You don’t have to bury your head in the sand, but you don’t need to let the news consume your life, either,” explains Pasricha. He also suggests we avoid toxic people, instead surrounding ourselves with people who are happy to take care of their own happiness.

“I also suggest you throw away the concept of retirement. The happiest society in the world is in Okinawa, Japan. Their life span is seven years longer than Americans, and they don’t even have a word for retirement in their vocabulary.”

Pasricha says four of the things that help us live happy lives tend to disappear when we retire:

Social—friends and colleagues

Stimulation—learning new things

Structure—a reason to get out of bed

Story—being a part of something

“I highly recommend that you forget about retirement and remember that happiness is a choice. You can change your mindset and choose to influence your life in a positive, happy way.”

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I work for the tax collector’s office at my local county tax agency. The bulk of my efforts go to facilitating change into that environment. I am a career-driven person and I am finding it very difficult to influence others.

My job is under the umbrella of a state agency and I recently have been voted to be on a leadership board for my county. This organization has been plagued with old traditions and scandals of misuse of power. I’m optimistic and believe that I can change the environment—but at times it exhausts me.

When the HR department selected me for a grievance board committee recently, my boss asked me “Why don’t you let someone else win for a change?” I don’t know how to interpret that. What should I do differently?

Trying to Make Change

Dear Trying to Make Change,

The good news here is that it sounds like you are having quite a bit of success—but it also sounds like you are stepping on some toes to achieve it. Although a little toe stepping is probably inevitable, there might be some ways to soften your approach and make more friends than enemies.

Forgive me for generalizing, but in my experience people who have worked in local government a long time don’t love change. Government work tends to attract folks who seek predictability and stability. Even if they start out with the best of intentions—and of course, many do—if a system is in place that protects their job and benefits them in specific ways, they are loath to give that up.

You have stepped into the role of change agent, which will immediately cause others to suspect you if not outright hate you. You must realize that the role of change agent requires some advanced skills. If your boss is experiencing you as wanting to win at all costs, causing others to lose, somehow it appears that you are engineering things as win/lose.

To ease your path, you are going to have to develop more diplomacy. You’ll need to have conversations that will help people see the changes as a win/win. It is relentless, hard, and, yes, exhausting work. You sound like a logical person, so it is probably difficult for you to see why someone wouldn’t automatically understand why a change might be needed. Because it is so obvious to you, there is a good chance you may not be sharing all of the detail that might help others see things the way you do.

This alone is worth the price of the book. However, Arrien also provides some excellent ideas on how to develop oneself if one identifies with any of the roles in the title. I would say you probably at the very least are a warrior and a visionary. These are extremely difficult roles to play in the world, and you will need to create a long-term personal development program to sustain your efforts.

In the meantime, work on developing and deepening your relationships, gathering input from stakeholders, listening, overcommunicating, and being kind. I am sure you are right about the old traditions and the bad behavior, but no one likes to feel judged. The past is the past. You represent the new. Let the new be characterized by drawing on what is best in people and what people are doing right.

And, I am sorry to say it, you’ll need to develop a thick skin because no matter how hard you try, some people are still going to hate you. It just goes with the job.

Fight on, change warrior!

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I’ve had my eye on a position that might be opening in my company. It would be a big step for me, but I think this is the job I have always wanted.

My problem is that the minute I start even thinking about applying, I feel overcome with anxiety and literally break into a cold sweat. Then I hear a voice in my head saying, “Who the heck do you think you are?”

How do I get up the nerve to pursue this? I am not even sure I want the job, but how will I ever know if I get so anxious I can’t even think about it? Help!

Riddled with Doubt

Dear Riddled,

It is rare to have so many topics covered in such a short question, so I will take them in turn, in order of priority.

You need to get some help with your anxiety before you do anything else. We all deal with some anxiety, but yours is interfering with your life. This is the definition of an emotional or psychological condition that needs to be addressed. Anxiety is tricky. It creeps up on you slowly and backs you into a corner before you even realize what is happening. So I am telling you, point blank, you are in a corner and you need to get some help. There are some excellent tools available to help you tame your anxiety. If those don’t work…well, a professional can help you.

You have had your eye on this job, so clearly you can see yourself in it. Do you think you have the skills and competencies required to apply and be taken seriously? More important, do you trust yourself to be able to learn quickly and grow into the job in a reasonable amount of time?

In another part of your email you stated you are a female. As a woman, your social conditioning does leave you at a disadvantage when it comes to putting yourself out there. The statistics are varied, but the one I see most consistently says that men tend to apply for opportunities when they have just 60 percent of the qualifications, while women generally don’t apply unless they are 100 percent qualified. The various reasons for this are outlined in this article that might interest you.

Ultimately, the rules that make someone successful in school don’t really apply to working in large systems. The way to get ahead and continually find challenges for yourself will require you to take risks. You will fail, but you will also succeed. As many have said, if you don’t ask, the answer will always be “no.”

I was struck by your use of the language “Who do you think you are?” This is language we hear from people in childhood designed to keep us in our place. It is cruel and demeaning. And here you are, using it on yourself! Cut it out. Honestly. It isn’t as if you are proposing to perform brain surgery with no training. You are simply thinking about maybe trying for a new and different job that may be interesting.

I would ask you to answer that question realistically. Who do you think you are? What are your skills and strengths? What experience do you have? What do you bring to the table that maybe no other applicant has? To get a new perspective on this, you might try taking that Values in Action Strengths Assessment—it’s free and fun. It will help you answer that question more positively than you otherwise might.

This is kind of old news, but I love it so much and it has not lost its power—and you may never have seen it. It is from Marianne Williamson’s A Return to Love and it was quoted by Nelson Mandela in his inauguration speech:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?” Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone—and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

Finally, Riddled, get your friends and family on board here. Ask anyone for support that you know loves you and wants the best for you. Get a handle on the anxiety, stop playing small, get support, and go for it. Start with some deep breathing. Breathing never hurts, and always helps.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/10/27/anxious-about-applying-for-a-new-job-ask-madeleine/feed/011670The Top 5 Characteristics of Servant Leadershttps://leaderchat.org/2018/10/25/research-the-top-5-characteristics-of-servant-leaders/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/10/25/research-the-top-5-characteristics-of-servant-leaders/#commentsThu, 25 Oct 2018 11:55:48 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11639In their academic paper Identifying Primary Characteristics of Servant Leadership, researchers Adam Focht and Michael Ponton share the results of a Delphi study they conducted with scholars in the field of servant leadership.

A total of twelve characteristics were identified, five of which were agreed upon by all of the scholars polled. These five most prominent servant leadership characteristics were:

Valuing People. Servant leaders value people for who they are, not just for what they give to the organization. Servant leaders are committed first and foremost to people—particularly, their followers.

Humility. Servant leaders do not promote themselves; they put other people first. They are actually humble, not humble as an act. Servant leaders know leadership is not all about them—things are accomplished through others.

Listening. Servant leaders listen receptively and nonjudgmentally. They are willing to listen because they truly want to learn from other people—and to understand the people they serve, they must listen deeply. Servant leaders seek first to understand, and then to be understood. This discernment enables the servant leader to know when their service is needed.

Trust. Servant leaders give trust to others. They willingly take this risk for the people they serve. Servant leaders are trusted because they are authentic and dependable.

Caring. Servant leaders have people and purpose in their heart. They display a kindness and concern for others. As the term servant leadership implies, servant leaders are here to serve, not to be served. Servant leaders truly care for the people they serve.

Both lists can serve as good starting points for HR and L&D executives looking to bring an others-focused culture into their organizations. What’s been your experience? Feel free to enter additional characteristics of a servant leader in the comments section below.

Interested in learning more about bringing servant leadership principles into your organization? Join us for a free webinar on November 15!

Dr. Vicki Halsey, vice president of applied learning for The Ken Blanchard Companies and author of Brilliance By Design, will conduct a presentation for leadership, learning, and talent development professionals on 3 Keys to Building a Servant Leadership Curriculum.

In this enlightening webinar, Dr. Halsey will connect servant leadership characteristics to competencies and share best practices on how to design a comprehensive curriculum for your organization. You can learn more here. The event is free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

I started a business with my best friend about ten years ago after the real estate bubble burst and we were both laid off from our financial services business.

Against considerable odds, we have been very successful. We decided when we started to grow that he would be CEO and I would CFO/COO. The roles made sense in terms of our strengths and skill sets.

In the past two years or so, my partner has let the title go to his head and has begun acting as if he is the sole head of the business. He has been making decisions on his own, without consulting me, and treating me as if I am his employee, not his equal partner.

We have identical financial stakes in the business and have been working side by side the whole time—so we are, in fact, business equals. It would bother me less if he weren’t making some poor decisions. What do you think I should do?

Concerned

Dear Concerned,

This situation should bother you a lot, even if he were making all good decisions. Somehow you have given away your power to your partner and you need to cut it out. Make a date to have a good chat. If he won’t commit to a time, sit in his office until he walks in. You may have to force the issue because at this point he is probably avoiding you. You must absolutely stop this situation before things spiral out of control.

Business partnerships are like marriages. They both require a baseline of mutual affection and respect and a contract or code for behavior—but most important, they need wide open communication. I wonder if you have set values for the business. If so, you might be able to call on those. Either way, something has shifted and you must address it now.

Prepare for the conversation by being clear about what behaviors are out of character and not working. Do not attack him personally. Formulate your requests for change and be prepared to make them. Also be prepared to hear from him what you’ve been doing that is not working for him, as I am sure there are things that are going unsaid.

Somehow, something went sideways between the two of you—and you probably know what it was. You need to get it all out on the table. It wouldn’t hurt to work with a professional who can help the two of you communicate and set up rules of the road for moving forward. But that is in the future. I am a big fan of a technique from Paul and Layne Cutright called the “Heart to Heart Talk.” It’s a way of getting all the stuff that needs to be said between two people out on the table so that it can be discussed and they can move on. Randy Conley wrote about it in another Blanchard blog, which you can read here. This technique could be step two. It’s very effective—but it requires the two participants to behave themselves and really act like grownups.

Please don’t let this go on much longer. The more you let your partner run amok, the more normal it will seem to everyone and the harder it will be to stop. The longer you don’t stand up for yourself as an equal, the more he will treat you as if you’re not one.

Good luck, Concerned.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

In this episode, Vicki Halsey, author of Brilliance by Design, shares a case study of a team putting the ENGAGE model into practice. For years, both in the school environment and in corporate education, Vicki Halsey observed what was happening in classrooms—a teacher standing in front of a group of people, talking at them. The people in the audience were not engaged; only the speaker. This was very different from Vicki’s classrooms, where people were active, inspired, and even noisy.

“It occurred to me that the person who is energized and all fired up is the one doing the teaching—not the one doing the learning. It should be the other way around,” explains Halsey. “It happens every day in companies around the world. We hire people because they have fabulous transferable skills, but we don’t spend the time it takes to teach them what they need to know in their new position to help them be successful. We don’t engage them in learning. So, to help the learning process, I designed a simple six-step process that brings out the brilliance in learners: the ENGAGE model.”

Energize and Focus Learners—Get people involved before the session starts by sending emails to explain the importance of the experience. Then give them exposure to the materials that will be used. Send books, articles, podcasts, or video to help them start to learn before they get there. When they arrive at the meeting or classroom, get them involved immediately with an interactive exercise.

Navigate the Content—Present the content through interactive lectures, demonstrations, stories, handouts, exercises with card sorts, or case studies. The key is to understand that people learn in different ways. You need to present the content in enough ways to give everyone a chance to learn.

Generate Meaning—Once the attendees have learned the content, move the learning from short-term memory to long-term memory and help participants sell themselves on why the learning is important in their world by having them create flip charts about the value, benefits, and meaning of this learning in their lives. This will rally commitment for the next part of the ENGAGE model so that they will apply what they have learned.

Apply to the Real World—Have people apply what they have learned through practicing or rehearsing. Give them all the tools they need—checklists, scripts, video examples—then have them practice, practice, practice.

Gauge and Celebrate—It is critical to assess how much learning has occurred—and then celebrate. This can be as simple as a quiz show-style game or crossword puzzle, a group mind map, or a “stump the panel” game. The idea is to create a fun way to deepen the learning and help transfer the learning to doing.

Extend Learning to Action—Keep the learning top of mind after the meeting or class. Send reminders with a tip of the week, share success stories of people using their new skills, or have award ceremonies to honor people’s commitment to the learning. Continuous reminders or refreshers will help extend the learning.

“Research indicates that designs for learning sessions focus about 70 percent of the time on the content to be learned and only about 30 percent on having learners practice what they are learning,” says Halsey. “If you want to unleash the brilliance of your people, you must flip that equation, so they are practicing the new skills 70 percent of the time. Don’t just talk at them. Let them process, learn, and get to work.”

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I have been working for over 15 years in my field and have moved up the ranks. In my last role I was a manager.

Six months ago, I left my old job and moved to a company that had a small team where I was given a supervisor/team lead title that was one step below my previous position. That was fine, given that the title was the next rank down in the new company’s hierarchy. I also anticipated that the job would further my skill set and I would learn different tools and approaches. I had felt stagnant in my previous job.

Recently, our department head created a new “senior team lead” level between the role I have and the one above. My teammate was then promoted to this new role based on the fact she’s been here for a year longer than I have and would be assisting my team lead with strategy.

I don’t begrudge my teammate her promotion because she deserves it. However, I’m feeling like I’ve effectively been demoted because I’m now two ranks below manager instead of one. And the way that my manager presented a document detailing the new “career path” felt patronizing.

I also feel that my 15+ years in the field counts for nothing and that I’m just seen as a new person who has been with the company for six months—even though I have more experience and skills than both my team lead and my teammate put together.

I know I have the skills for this newly created job, but I would have to work here for another three to five years to be promoted even to my former level, let alone anything above that.

Should I say something? What? How? And to whom?

Thanks,

Did I Make a Mistake?

Dear Did I Make a Mistake,

I think you might be focusing on the wrong things. The questions to ask yourself are:

In this new job, are you able to further your skill set and learn different tools and approaches as you expected?

Do you like your team and your new manager?

Do you enjoy working with your new team?

Is your current compensation and benefit package working for you?

Is your quality of life (workspace, commute, personal sustainability) better with your new job, or worse?

Do you want to manage people, or do you prefer to be a technical specialist?

It sounds like your mind is really stuck on the seniority and your career trajectory, which is fine, but you must decide if that is more important to you than everything else.

That you felt patronized in your meeting with your manager is a different and separate issue. You definitely want to clear the air about that. If she isn’t aware of your experience, it wouldn’t hurt for her to know about it. If she is open to feedback about her approach to the conversation, it would be very good to share what you thought and how it made you feel. Just because your title isn’t where you want it to be doesn’t mean that your experience should be diminished or that you should feel disrespected.

If you weigh the answers to all of questions against your dissatisfaction with your seniority and title and it still feels all wrong, then you have your answer. Fight for the right title and level based on your experience—and be ready to go elsewhere if proper adjustments can’t be made.

If everything is really working for you, I suggest you let this go and focus on simply enjoying the work and doing a great job.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

In this enlightening episode, Brené Brown describes her research study, seven years in the making, that looks at the future of leadership and the barriers and obstacles to daring leadership. “One of the most important findings of my career is daring leadership—a collection of skills and practices that are teachable, observable, and measurable. It’s learning and unlearning that requires brave work, tough conversations, and showing up with your whole heart. It isn’t easy—because choosing courage over comfort is not always our default. But it is necessary if you want to cultivate braver, more daring leaders, and embed the value of courage into your culture,” explains Brown.

Brown describes the four skills needed to become a courageous leader. The first and most important skill is Rumbling with Vulnerability. Brown had assumed that the biggest barrier to courageous leadership would be fear, but her research indicated that fear is not a barrier. In fact, leaders she interviewed admitted to being fearful much of the time. The real barrier is how people armor themselves to deal with the fear. It is critical to understand that we all self-protect when we feel scared, defensive, or vulnerable.

A great tool to use when Rumbling with Vulnerablity is curiosity. “When I find myself in a tough situation or I’m about to receive some hard feedback, instead of getting my armor up, I stay open and ask questions, so I can get specific information,” Brown explains. In the book she identifies 16 different ways we armor ourselves and offers ways to move that armor out of the way to become a daring, courageous leader.

The second skill is Living into Your Values. Leaders constantly must do tough things, give hard feedback, put bold ideas into motion while being unsure of the outcome, and take many risks. Courageous leaders are able to do this consistently because they operate with a clear set of values and behaviors that line up with those values. “It is important to have values as a leader, but it is critical to operationalize them. Otherwise they are just vague concepts, not guiding principles,” Brown explains.

The third skill, Braving Trust, can be tricky because many leaders don’t know how to talk about trust. Direct reports have to trust their leaders in order to have honest conversations and both parties have to be in an unarmored position. It’s no secret that the highest performing teams are built on a foundation of trust. And building trust is a skill that can be taught and learned.

The fourth skill is Learning to Rise and deals with the ability to re-set after an error or mistake. The ability to be resilient helps leaders learn from mistakes quickly, share those learnings, and continue to move forward in a positive way. And, yes, it is a skill that every leader can learn.

“Courage is a skill set we can teach, measure, and observe, but we are choosing not to because it is an investment of energy and time and it takes muscle building. But why are we choosing not to do it? If we need braver leaders, but we’re not investing in skilling them up, what is getting in the way?” asked Brown.

Brown’s new book, Dare to Lead is the ultimate playbook that offers practical skill-building tools for creating brave leaders in your organization.

About The Ken Blanchard Companies

The Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

About Brené Brown

For more information on Brené Brown, go to www.brenebrown.com and click on the Dare to Lead Hub for free resources.

I have been assigned to handle a new team and we are currently in the developmental stage.

Yesterday as I did a few one-on-one sessions, one of the new hires on my team (let’s call her Laura) mentioned that one of my tenured team members (let’s call her Carol) was cold to her.

Laura said the only interaction she has had with Carol was when Carol told her in person that she is not allowed to use a term of endearment when talking with another woman in the office. Both Carol and Laura are LGBT. Laura said she apologized to Carol by saying she was sorry if Carol thinks it was inappropriate for her to call another woman by an endearing term but Carol did not answer.

Although I have heard rumors that Carol is interested in the woman whom Laura called by an endearing term, I have advised Laura to not magnify the situation because it might be just her imagination, and to give Carol the benefit of the doubt. I also asked her to let me know immediately if Carol starts displaying harassing behavior.

In the meantime, as a supervisor, I know I need to extinguish whatever ember is under the rug that might turn into fire. I have not yet spoken to Carol. She was part of my team before this, and we never discussed personal matters. I am scheduled to talk to her next week. Could you give me tips on how I can best nip this situation in the bud? Thank you so much.

Need to Avoid a Fire

Dear Need to Avoid a Fire,

Welcome to management. Isn’t it fun? People are the wild card, every time. Their needs, their desires, their wants.

First, let’s eliminate the static. I think the LGBT issue is a red herring, as well as who may or may not be attracted to whom. Rumors are—well, rumors, and you can’t depend on them to be true. And even if you could, it really doesn’t matter. The key is for everyone to have clear rules for interacting regardless of orientation or interest.

As a manager, since this could blow up, it would be smart for you to keep a clear record of every single thing that comes to your attention as this drama unfolds. Hopefully it will stop before it gains any steam, but you have to cover yourself.

In terms of the bigger picture of forming a new team, I highly recommend that you do two things:

Share the laws of your state or country around what constitutes harassment. In California, harassment is essentially in the eye of the beholder. Based on this, you can share what is most relevant, such as:

Avoid any and all personal observations; i.e.: “you look so pretty in that skirt!” It is always safer to keep compliments impersonal; i.e.: “that skirt is great looking.”

Avoid terms of endearment under any circumstances.

Keep your hands to yourself at all times.

Keep humor clean and light and always be mindful of anyone you may be insulting.

Work with everyone on your team to come up with norms for the team that everyone can live with. Examples include:

We agree that we are on time

We treat each other with respect

We give each other direct feedback

We talk things through when there is conflict

Speaking with Carol is going to be critical. One thing to do is request that she have a heart-to-heart talk with Laura to accept the apology and move on. Creating the norm of having your team members give each other direct feedback and talk things through when there is conflict is ideal, if difficult to achieve.

Be kind, be firm, and stop paying attention to anything that doesn’t matter.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/10/06/not-sure-how-to-handle-a-possible-harassment-issue-ask-madeleine/feed/011598What to Look for When Building a Servant Leadership Curriculumhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/10/04/3-keys-to-building-a-servant-leadership-curriculum/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/10/04/3-keys-to-building-a-servant-leadership-curriculum/#respondThu, 04 Oct 2018 11:10:18 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11579“Building a servant leadership curriculum begins by identifying the attitudes, skills, and behaviors of a servant leader,” says Vicki Halsey, vice president of applied learning for The Ken Blanchard Companies. “Once you’ve identified what to teach and how to teach it, you can begin to look at the training modules you have in place and what you might need to add.”

As a part of a 13-city servant leadership executive briefing series, Halsey has worked with leadership, learning, and talent development professionals to identify more than 60 skills and attributes that should be part of a comprehensive servant leadership training program.

“Of course you have to take this a step at a time,” says Halsey, “and recognize that some of your desired outcomes are part of a mindset—attitudinal, while others are part of a skill set—behaviors that can be learned and developed.”

“Topping the servant leader mindset traits is empathy, closely followed by selflessness and humility,” says Halsey. “This is the recognition that leadership is not about you and your agenda. It is about leading others to achieve their goals in order to achieve larger organizational goals in a collaborative way. It’s about assessing people’s needs and providing the right amount of direction and support to help them succeed.”

The top servant leader skill set behaviors are task- or goal-specific listening, asking questions instead of telling, and focusing on how and when to develop others.

“These are skills that can be taught,” explains Halsey. “If you want to be a servant leader, you must focus your energies on developing and practicing the behaviors of a servant leader.”

Halsey recommends that L&D professionals conduct an audit of their current leadership development curriculum and compare it against the complete list of attributes identified by learning professionals.

“Most organizations have some of the components already in place as a part of their current leadership development curriculum. But there are often a few competencies not on the list, such as advanced coaching skills, building trust, and self leadership, for example.

“When you compare your list with the complete list, look for gaps and consider how they might be addressed. Don’t overlook leadership basics,” says Halsey.

“Performance management concepts such as collaborative goal setting, situational specific day-to-day coaching, and effective performance reviews are still critical. You are covering the same content—just from a different point of view.

“Once you have all of the pieces in place, the next step is to organize the content in a logical flow where leaders learn and practice basic skills in and out of context and then move to more advanced skills. Along the way, keep working on encouraging a servant leadership mindset as you teach the servant leadership skill set.”

The world needs a new leadership model, says Halsey—one that focuses on both people and results.

“Engaged people and great results are not mutually exclusive—you can achieve both. With some good design and consistent application, you can create an organizational culture where leaders see their job as serving others and also see goal achievement as a shared responsibility.”

Would you like to learn more about creating a servant leadership curriculum in your organization? Join us for a free webinar!

3 Keys to Building a Servant Leadership Curriculum

Thursday, November 15, 2018, 9:00 a.m. Pacific Time

Servant leadership principles are being rediscovered by a new generation of leadership, learning, and talent development professionals. An others-focused approach where people lead best by serving first is being recognized as one of the best ways to unlock performance in today’s organizations.

In this webinar, instructional design expert Dr. Vicki Halsey, vice president of applied learning at The Ken Blanchard Companies, will share how to design, build, and launch an effective servant leadership curriculum. Drawing on her research and experience designing hundreds of training courses for clients worldwide, Vicki will share three keys to an effective curriculum:

Identify the key components of a comprehensive program. Halsey will share research on the attitudes, skills, and behaviors most associated with an others-focused approach to leadership.

Evaluate current gaps in existing training. A comprehensive curriculum includes self-awareness, listening, coaching, and performance management components. Halsey will show you how to audit your current classes and identify gaps.

Utilize effective design principles. An effective curriculum includes asynchronous and virtual training components as well as face-to-face components for interpersonal skills. Halsey will share how to match technology to content and how to create engaging learning experiences across all modalities.

Participants will have an opportunity to ask questions, explore options, and get answers about their own designs from Halsey’s expert instructional design point of view.

Use the link below to register. This event is free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

I work as a training manager in a large organization. Two years ago my boss was let go. Since then, I have been doing both her job and my old job.

I like my current boss (formerly my boss’s boss) but it’s obvious that he is fine with the existing situation. I’m not—and I feel taken advantage of.

My review is coming up and I am wondering how direct I should be. I am an introvert and quite shy and standing up for myself is not my strong suit. On the other hand, I am angry now.

Mad at My Boss

Dear Mad,

Getting two full-time employees for the price of one is one of the oldest tricks in the book. Managers get away with it because employees let them. It’s good that you’re angry. I hope that anger will catapult you into action and get you to stand up for yourself. Use it to drive your planning and fire up your courage.

You should be very direct—but the key is to remainemotionally neutral while being so. It is my experience that the reason most people don’t demand what is fair is that they can’t find a way to express themselves without becoming emotional. So they just don’t express themselves at all.

So how to do it?

Think long and hard about what your requests will be. Put them in order of priority and decide what is negotiable and what isn’t. Then practice, practice, practice. Ask a friend to play your boss and force yourself to do it. It will feel awkward, and you will feel embarrassed at first—but isn’t it better to feel that way in a safe environment than when you are with your boss and the stakes are high?

Practice ways of saying no. Try variations like “That doesn’t work for me; what if we did this instead?” or “Let’s consider another approach.” Get comfortable with a couple of phrases that may not be normal for you. You are asking yourself to perform something way out of your comfort zone, so preparation will be your best friend.

Reflect on your experience with your current boss and brainstorm all possible objections or arguments he might use to talk you out of your requests. Practice your well-thought-through responses.

Think through everything—job responsibilities, how attached you are to the change in title, and, of course, salary. Put it all in writing so you don’t forget anything (easy to do if your nerves get the best of you). Begin by asking for everything you want and be ready to negotiate down to what is essential. Decide in advance what you are willing to give up—and what you will do if you can’t get what is most essential to you.

You should consider being prepared to leave the job if you can’t get your boss to agree to your bare minimum. This means brushing up your resume, polishing your LinkedIn profile, and even putting out feelers if you haven’t already. Having a Plan B will make you feel stronger in your negotiations.

You may find a lot of excellent support in Amy Cuddy’s book, Presence: How to Bring Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges. Amy Cuddy is a social scientist who has overcome her own natural shyness, so she strikes me as extraordinarily credible. I am a big fan of her research on “power posing” and have used it myself before doing things that scare me. If you don’t have time to get her book, you can at least watch her TED talk.

When the time comes for the conversation, take especially good care of yourself. Make sure you have enough time and you won’t be interrupted. Remember to breathe. If you feel dizzy from nerves or can’t remember what you wanted to say, feel the soles of your feet on the floor and take a deep breath. Everything you need to remember will come in on your breath and you will be fine.

Most of us spend all of our time preparing for what we want to say and no time at all preparing for the end of the conversation. Your manager will benefit from this and will probably try to get you to agree to things in the meeting, but don’t fall for it! Do not, not, NOT capitulate to anything in the conversation. Instead, take everything he proposes—take notes if you need to—and tell him you will think about it. This will give you the time you need to think things through with your wits about you.

This may all feel like overkill, and it may be. But I guarantee all of this thoughtfulness and preparation will give you gravitas and make you brave—which will make it much harder for your boss to turn you down.

Fortune favors the brave…and the prepared.

Be fierce.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/29/doing-the-work-of-two-people-need-help-ask-madeleine/feed/0115733 Ways to Combat Perfectionismhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/09/25/3-ways-to-combat-perfectionism/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/25/3-ways-to-combat-perfectionism/#commentsTue, 25 Sep 2018 10:45:37 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11563When a person goes through leadership coaching it often includes some kind of evaluation, such as a 360-degree assessment. Debriefing the assessment results is typically done during one of the first coaching sessions. This debrief helps the coaching client identify strengths they can leverage as well as potential areas for development.

I’ve noticed a trend when doing these debriefs. A client’s self rating is often noticeably lower in several areas than ratings from other people such as their direct reports or their boss. Most clients aren’t surprised at this; in fact, many laugh and chalk it up to their being a perfectionist. They often say they know they set a high bar for themselves and put lots of pressure on themselves—but they seem to accept this as the way they are wired. But is it?

Most people agree that striving to continually grow and develop and to achieve one’s goals is a desirable trait. Perfectionism, on the other hand, can be a different story. A perfectionist is often defined as someone who strives for flawlessness.

Many of my clients who label themselves perfectionists push themselves harder than anyone asks them to. They tend to work more than they need to. They fear making a mistake because they are afraid others will see their imperfection. These behaviors and beliefs can make them inauthentic in their interactions with others because they don’t like to reveal what I call their “soft underbelly.”

Full disclosure here: I have perfectionist tendencies. But seeing this characteristic often in my clients has caused me to look at my own perfectionism and make efforts to throttle back these inclinations.

“Perfection is man’s ultimate illusion. It simply doesn’t exist in the universe. There is no perfection. It’s really the world’s greatest con game; it promises riches and delivers misery. The harder you strive for perfection, the worse your disappointment will become because it’s only an abstraction, a concept that doesn’t fit reality. Everything can be improved if you look at it closely and critically enough—every person, every idea, every work of art, every experience, everything.”

Most perfectionists have been that way all their lives and often have underlying beliefs that drive their perfectionism. That said, greater self awareness and a commitment to lighten up on oneself can be a start. Thanks to the internet, there is much information at our fingertips regarding the pros and cons of perfectionism as well as techniques for lessening its negative effects. Here are a few:

Realize that we are often our own worst critic. Most people are not rating and judging us to the degree we are rating and judging ourselves. Interesting fact: people often feel uncomfortable around perfectionists.

Don’t judge your insides by other people’s outsides. Most people tend to put their best “Facebook” image out there—one that is different from how they actually feel inside. So don’t compare yourself to others.

Try to keep in mind what author Brené Brown says: “Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be our best. Perfectionism is not about healthy achievement and growth; it’s a shield.”

I often ask my perfectionistic clients if they could “dare to be average.” They usually groan—because to them, average is tantamount to failure. Some, however, do work to unclench their jaw and not operate at full throttle all the time. So far, none of them has died, and several have reported feeling more at ease then they have in a long time.

Might you benefit from examining whether perfectionism is having a negative influence on your life? Please let me know what you discover!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I work in sales in a large medical device company. I kill my numbers and have been number one in my region for the last six quarters.

I need your advice. My company continually makes errors in creating inventory of the devices we are selling. I just don’t think that I, in good conscience, can continue to sell my heart out when I know that the company will not deliver on its promises of continual customer service and care.

I am at the beginning of my career so maybe I’m just being naïve—but I would like to think that a company like ours understands that when it’s a life or death situation for our customers, keeping some inventory would make sense.

I mentioned this concern to my boss and she looked at me funny and said, “Well, I’m not sure everyone would agree with you.”

I understand that holding inventory is seen as a liability on the books, but it’s becoming clear to me that in the name of better quarterly numbers and shareholder value, the company is literally okay with putting lives at risk.

The good news is that you’re killing it despite having serious reservations, so it sounds like you really could find a job elsewhere if you decide you can’t stand the situation you’re in. However, big public pharmaceutical and medical device companies have a fiduciary responsibility to their shareholders and must manage the numbers for the Wall Street optics—so I’m not sure you’ll find a different company with customer service as its honest-to-goodness number one priority. Exceptions might be found in privately held firms.

You could look for a company, a product, and a go-to-market strategy with less problematic integrity issues. Or, because your values are such a strong driver for you, you might think about how to apply your sales skill set, brains, and stamina to an organization that does something you believe in deeply.

What you’re seeing is probably the tip of the iceberg. Forgive me if I sound cynical, but I have been working in organizations for long enough to know that people at the individual contributor level only see about half of what’s really going on. So if you’re outraged now, you would probably be incensed if you knew everything.

You say you’re young, so maybe you’re not already wearing the golden handcuffs that come with a big mortgage and children who will require a college education—so the time to make the big decision is probably right now.

Nobody’s perfect and companies make questionable decisions all the time, so you’ll need to decide what you can live with and what is unacceptable. What I do know for sure is that people who spend too much time working in situations that force them to act in direct opposition to their own values eventually run out of steam. Somebody else might say, “Oh for goodness’ sake, grow up and get over yourself.” If you were supporting a family and had no other choice at all, I might say that. But it sounds like you do have a choice, and you have personal agency.

So here we are, back at the beginning. Yes. Get out. Go find yourself a situation where you can make a significant contribution to something great. You will never look back.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

In this episode, Susan Fowler explores how most companies expect managers to motivate their people to accomplish goals. Managers may try many different methods to encourage people to reach their goals, from rewards and recognition to pressure and intimidation. But research indicates that these methods just don’t work. “When did we get to the point that people have to be motivated by carrots and sticks—carrots representing incentives or bribes, and sticks representing pressure, threats and tension?” asks Fowler.

Many people may not be aware of new research showing that the real secret to motivation is creating an environment where people are optimally motivated to perform at their highest level.

“Look at your own beliefs,” says Fowler. “Do you think people are basically lazy and won’t do what you want them to do, or do you believe people want to thrive and make a contribution in their role? Do you believe people are more motivated extrinsically or intrinsically?”

Research indicates that people want to thrive and that intrinsic rewards are more sustainably motivating than extrinsic rewards. Problems arise when managers don’t believe people want to succeed or when they default to extrinsic reward systems to improve performance.

Fowler describes three conversations managers can have with direct reports. Each includes a separate set of questions to help analyze a direct report’s motivation on certain projects or tasks. The first set of questions gets to the root of the psychological need for autonomy: does the direct report feel good or bad about the choices available to them on their task? Everyone needs a sense of control over what they do. The second set of questions focuses on the psychological need for connection or relatedness and helps identify values and purpose. The third set of questions relates to the psychological need for competence and describes the skills the person brings to the task.

When the manager asks the direct report questions that put them in touch with their needs for choice, connection, and competence, the direct report is able to find their own source of motivation internally—and that is the most powerful motivation.

“You must remember to be mindful and not judgmental when having these conversations with your staff,” Fowler says. “By asking these questions, you are helping people to be more self-aware and to explore what their motivational outlook is all about.”

Fowler believes managers can create an environment where their people can have a better quality of life. “It’s not that we don’t want money—we are all motivated by money, power, and status—but there are other options that serve us and the people around us more effectively. We need to become more aware of why we are motivating people the way we are, and what is motivating us.” Fowler encourages you to ask yourself these three questions: (1) Why do I make the choices I make? (2) How do I feel a greater connection? and (3) How do I learn and grow every day?

About The Ken Blanchard CompaniesThe Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, government agencies, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

]]>115535 Keys to Organizational Culture Changehttps://leaderchat.org/2018/09/18/5-keys-to-organizational-culture-change/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/18/5-keys-to-organizational-culture-change/#respondTue, 18 Sep 2018 10:45:13 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11547In its simplest definition, culture is the way things get done in an organization. It’s about the behaviors and attitudes of employees and management and how that translates into different approaches to performance—both good and bad.

If you are a leader looking to improve your organization’s current culture and work environment, here are five steps used by change practitioners that can help with your next change initiative.

Look at what needs to change. Ideally, a leader should do this collaboratively with the organization’s leadership team or the entire management team. Examine culture and behavior norms as well as strategic goals. Ask these questions: “How big is the gap from where we are today to where we need to be?” “What cultural behaviors do we want to keep?” “What behaviors do we need to get rid of?” Describe the ideal state. Now ask: “What will people be doing differently?”

Create a scorecard. What are the leading—and lagging—indicators of success? Prioritize short-term as well as long-term goals. What are expectations within the next six months? By year one? By year three? A scorecard allows everyone to see the targets as well as the progress.

Get feedback. Leaders need to embrace feedback to understand where they may be helping or hurting the change process. Leaders set the tone for organizational culture. When the culture isn’t working, the leader must look in the mirror and ask “What am I doing that may be either serving or not serving our culture?” It may be time for a 360° leadership assessment.

A good 360° assessment is one that gets specific. The best ones I’ve seen have the leader work with a coach to create questions for the leader’s direct reports, peers, and boss. The coach conducts the interviews, pinpoints themes (similar responses from three or more people), then prepares a report and delivers it to the leader.

Be a role model for receiving feedback. A best practice for receiving feedback is for the leader to share with their team what they learned and what they are committed to improving, and then to ask the team to help keep them accountable. This is where the shift in culture begins to take shape. The leader is demonstrating that they are serious about the change and that they personally believe it “starts with me.” Leaders who take responsibility for what’s working and what’s not, and for the behaviors they personally need to embrace, will be the ones who can look back months or years later and be proud of the culture they helped create.

Get a coach. You’ve heard that behavior change, no matter how small, can be difficult. Habitual behaviors are often years in the making. Regular coaching sessions help leaders not only make needed behavior shifts but also practice those new behaviors. Some coaches will even shadow a leader and give them timely feedback.

Today’s companies need to be agile and reinventive to keep up with the changing demands of their clients—and the organizational culture plays a significant role in whether those demands will be met. The culture can determine whether people will embrace a change or block it.

The leader sets the tone for leading the change to create a new culture. When implementing change in your organizational culture, use these five steps to get management and employee commitment to making a difference!

About the Author

Joni Wickline is a Vice President with The Ken Blanchard Companies. You can read Wickline’s posts as a part of Coaching Tuesday here at Blanchard LeaderChat for ideas, research, and inspirations from the world of executive coaching.

What the heck? I tried to get some detail out of him but didn’t get much. He said to get ahead here, I need to find ways to stand out and get noticed. I was figuring if I aced my advanced finance exams and did great work, the rest would take care of itself.

Can you shed some light on this?

In the Dark

Dear In the Dark,

The first thing I can tell you is that nothing ever takes care of itself. There is no fairness, no justice, and no reward for working hard. Doing great work is the ante that keeps you in a job and gets you one thing: more work. It doesn’t get you noticed or promoted—especially in the shark tank that is Wall Street.

You’re going to want to be clear about your career goals, develop relationships with anyone who can help you achieve them, and be memorable to anyone who matters. If you’re committed enough to your own success to study for and ace those fiendish exams, then you might be able to devote a little brain space and energy toward thinking about your brand.

I first heard about the concept of personal branding from Tom Peters back in the 90s. What I thought at the time would be a fad has really stuck. Essentially, it means thinking of yourself as a product that you need to keep top of mind with potential consumers.

This means you have to apply fundamental marketing theory to yourself. What are the features and benefits of you? Who might be interested in them? How do you differentiate yourself from other people like you? What real or perceived value do you bring to anyone who might work with you?

I can see your face right now, all scrunched up with distaste. I get it. I do. But you are an analytical thinker and obviously smart enough, so you can do this.

The key is to start with what is true. Those who try to build a brand based on lies can’t keep it up long term. Think about:

Who are you? I worked with one client who called himself a Hoosier—which essentially means being from the state of Indiana, but also stands for being straightforward and honest. Early in his career he hid it because he thought it made him seem unsophisticated, but eventually he built a very successful persona based on this and it always felt authentic because it was.

What is important to you? These are your values—what matters to you. You can develop a reputation for being a stickler for accuracy, being a data junkie, or being able to synthesize numbers into a narrative that is interesting to non-numbers types. Maybe you’re a super sharp dresser? Always into the latest hair styles? Keep it up, be consistent, and make it a signature.

What makes you unique? What odd combination of skills do you have that nobody else has?

What do people get from hanging out with you? If you really have no idea, ask your friends. They will tell you if you’re funny, or if you always ask the odd question that nobody else thinks of, or if you’re the person who knows every microbrewery in the tri-state area.

From the list of what is important to you, you can build standards for your own behavior and appearance that will always be consistent. You can make choices to reveal certain aspects of yourself, when, and to whom. This is what makes you special and memorable to people and this is what your boss is trying to tell you. Just doing good work and keeping your head down is not going to get you anywhere.

Finally, part of your brand is going to be defined by who you know and hang out with. Find people you like, are interested in, and can learn from based on what how you answer the questions above. Join committees at work that are focused on things that are important to you. Environmental issues? Saving Australian Shepherds? Whatever it is, find your tribe and hang out with them.

Identify the folks who have the job you want to be doing within the next three years and ask one of them to be your mentor. The first one may turn you down, but keep trying. You’re probably thinking “Oh no, I’m an introvert, I can’t do that!” Yes, you can—and if your career is important to you, you will. You can be as shy and introverted as you want in your personal life, but you’re going to have to move out of your comfort zone at work.

I know this is a lot of extra stuff to think about, so take it step by step. Slow and steady wins the race. Apply that work ethic and that considerable intelligence to this problem, and you will be just fine.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/15/need-help-building-your-brand-ask-madeleine/feed/211542Servant Leadership: 11 Questions to See If People Would Consider You a Servant Leaderhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/09/11/servant-leadership-11-questions-to-see-if-people-would-consider-you-a-servant-leader/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/11/servant-leadership-11-questions-to-see-if-people-would-consider-you-a-servant-leader/#commentsWed, 12 Sep 2018 01:30:03 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11537Ken Blanchard has a favorite question he asks audiences when he is speaking to them about servant leadership:

“Are you here to serve or to be served?”

Ken believes the way you answer that question determines how you approach leading others.

If you’re here to be served, you think leadership is all about you. You expect people to follow and obey, you don’t see any need for feedback or discussion, and you believe it’s your job to keep people accountable.

But if you’re here to serve, you take the time to listen, you invest in developing people, you seek out others’ opinions, and you enjoy catching people doing things right and cheering them on.

When Ken asks that question, almost everyone responds that they want to be seen as a serving leader. But what specific characteristics do servant leaders demonstrate to demonstrate this mindset?

In a series of executive briefings held in Houston, Ft. Lauderdale, and New York, we asked 130 leadership, learning, and talent development professionals to identify the attitudes, skills, and behaviors of a servant leader. We researched the answers and identified more than sixty attributes.

Wondering what personal qualities people look for when they think about servant leadership? Topping the list was empathy, closely followed by selflessness and humility. Also mentioned multiple times were being authentic, caring, collaborative, compassionate, honest, open-minded, patient, and self-aware.

Would people see you as a serving leader or a self-serving leader? Score yourself on each of these eleven servant leader attributes by answering yes, no, or somewhat, based on what you think people might say.

My people would say I am empathetic.

My people would say I am selfless.

My people would say I am humble.

My people would say I am authentic.

My people would say I am caring.

My people would say I am collaborative.

My people would say I am compassionate.

My people would say I am honest.

My people would say I am open-minded.

My people would say I am patient.

My people would say I am self-aware.

How did you do? Don’t feel bad if you can’t give yourself a perfect score. Most people—even those considered very good leaders—fall short in at least a couple of these areas.

Looking for a way to improve? You can start with becoming proficient at what our professionals see as the top three skills of a servant leader:

Become a better listener.

Ask, instead of tell.

Focus on developing people.

One thing all of these behaviors have in common is your willingness to set aside your own agenda and focus instead on what’s happening in the lives of people who report to you. Centering less on your needs and more on the needs of others will help you build the additional strengths that make people want to follow you.

Servant leadership is a better way to lead—and one that leads to higher levels of engagement, performance, and human satisfaction.

Interested in exploring servant leadership at an organizational level? Don’t miss two great opportunities coming up from The Ken Blanchard Companies!

Join Ken Blanchard for a free webinar on September 12! Ken will present on the topic Servant Leadership: 4 Keys to Leading at a Higher Level. Learn more here. (Over 1,500 people are registered but still room for others—up to 2,000.)

Beginning September 25, you can join The Ken Blanchard Companies for a live, face-to-face servant leadership networking event in one of 13 cities in the US and Canada! Explore servant leadership concepts together with other leadership, learning, and talent development professionals in your metropolitan area. See which city is closest to you here.

In this episode, Don Yaeger, author of Great Teams: 16 Things High Performing Organizations Do Differently, discusses his research on why some teams win when others fail. “My research of the business and sports world uncovered sixteen things that successful teams do, and I grouped them into four main pillars,” explains Yaeger. (As you listen, you’ll realize the names of the four pillars create the acronym TEAM.)

Pillar One: Targeting Purpose

“Every team has to have a shared sense of purpose,” says Yaeger, “but this is more a belief than a statement. A high performing team feels a shared purpose in their bones. It becomes part of who they are as a team.” You may have heard about Simon Sinek’s Why concept (if you know the answer to why your work matters, you will enjoy your work more.) The concept behind this pillar is very similar to Sinek’s concept, but it applies to entire teams, not individuals. The sense of purpose for a team identifies who they are serving and why that matters. Whether in business, sports, military operations, or day-to-day life, teams show up more positively when they share a sense of purpose.

Pillar Two: Effective Management

Yaeger explains that team leaders need to be committed to developing others. To build a team to its full potential, a leader should recruit people for a cultural fit and then train them for skills. Profit and loss statements are the roadmap to the future for many companies—but Yeager suggests having the right people in the right positions is a better way to ensure that people and teams are constantly developing and improving. The most successful teams have markers on their roadmap of performance defined as developmental goals, not monetary goals.

Pillar Three: Activating Efficiency

This pillar focuses on a willingness to not just accept change but embrace it, so the team can be successful even in transition. “It is important to build a culture of mentorship. Leaders do that by making their expectations clear and praising good performance that supports the culture. Every member of the team must act as a mentor when necessary. It isn’t the job of only the team leader to be a mentor—everyone needs to own that role.”
An especially good example of this pillar is for leaders to be fully engaged in all meetings or practices to let the team know their performance is the most important thing at that moment. In fact, Yaeger recommends that leaders be either fully engaged and present or fully absent. If a leader isn’t prepared to be there 100 percent, they might as well not show up at all.

Pillar Four: Mutual Direction

Great teams have a true sense of what they ultimately want and what it will take to get there. A football team focuses on the fourth quarter and a business team focuses on the completion of a project. Both teams focus on the finish. By preparing all along the way, great teams build a culture where they can win even in critical situations.
Most important, Yaeger urges team leaders to design the culture they want. “By design or by default, your team will have a culture. So design it the way you want it to be and focus on creating and maintaining it. The best teams aren’t necessarily the ones with the best talent—they are the ones with the strongest culture.”

About The Ken Blanchard Companies

The Ken Blanchard Companies is the global leader in management training. For nearly 40 years, Blanchard has been creating the best managers in the world, training over 150,000 people each year. From the award-winning First-time Manager program—based on the best-selling business book, The New One Minute Manager®—to SLII®, the most widely taught leadership model in the world, Blanchard is the provider of choice of Fortune 500 companies as well as small to medium businesses, governments, and educational and nonprofit organizations.

I got a new boss about six months ago and I have been watching and waiting to see how he is going to pan out. So far, so good, I think—except for one thing that is really burning my toast. Literally the first thing he did was to put a stop to all telecommuting in our entire department.

For me personally, it isn’t an issue, as I have a short commute and prefer to come in to the office. But it has thrown quite a few people in my department into chaos, as many have made plans around their work-from-home schedules.

Our company is in a huge metropolitan area and the commute times are insane—two hours each way for some people. I know that my employees are productive when they WFH—often more so, because they are less stressed and have more time to actually work.

The worst part is that the new boss isn’t following the rule himself! In fact, on a recent conference call, he talked about how great it was that he was working from home that day! We were all appalled. He lost so much of my respect in that moment.

How can I “manage up” here? What can I say to get the new boss to reverse the policy—or at the very least, understand that the rule has to apply to everyone?

I really hate it when superiors pull the “Do as I say, not as I do” thing.

Losing Respect

Dear Losing Respect,

I hate that, too. I share your belief that leaders should be role models for the behaviors they seek in their people.

There are two issues here. One is the sudden radical change in work-from-home policy. Hopefully, you have had enough time to observe your new boss to get a sense of the best way to approach him to give him feedback. You can run a little informal analysis: Is your boss an analytical thinker who will be moved by data? Or a more emotional type who will respond to a story? You can plan your tactical move here by shaping your arguments so that he can hear them.

You don’t state the why behind the change in the policy. Possibly he hasn’t shared it. You might start there and ask what prompted the change. Perhaps your boss thinks people watch daytime TV all day when they WFH. I spent over a decade as a virtual employee and I now manage a partially virtual team, and I can assure you that most people do get more done when they WFH.

Your boss may be data driven and able to be moved by actual information you have about how much your people get done when they WFH vs. coming into the office. Maybe your boss feels that face-to-face interactions are more effective. This may be true for some types of meetings, and you may find a good compromise. When you know what drives your boss’s thinking, you can mount a well-reasoned argument.

One client I worked with argued for her team members who had a regular WFH schedule, saying that she had given her word—in some cases as part of the hiring agreement—and that she felt strongly about keeping her promises. That made a big impact.

Now for the second issue: your boss’s stunning lack of self-awareness, revealed in his crowing about the luxury of working from home to people whom he has restricted from doing so themselves. Do you feel that you have enough of a relationship to say something yet? I know a lot of bosses really appreciate it when a direct report points out something they are doing that is decreasing their effectiveness. I know I sure do—we can all be a little oblivious sometimes. So, you might risk going straight at it: “Hey, may I share an observation? People are very cranky about not being able to WFH—so when you are doing so yourself, you might want to keep it on the QT.” Some people would appreciate your candid directness, but, of course, many wouldn’t.

You are going to have to trust your gut here. You may decide you don’t want to work for someone (a) who is such a numbskull and (b) with whom you can’t be honest. That would be a good data point on which to build a job search. You did say it was the only thing burning your toast. You can probably tolerate one thing. Even two things. My opinion, based on observation and absolutely no scientific research whatsoever, is that it takes five intolerable things before a person starts thinking about leaving—and the seventh one is the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

So, all in all, you are in pretty good shape. And now you know that one of your leadership non-negotiables is “Do as I do.” It will help you be clear about your own standards for yourself as a leader.

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/08/new-boss-not-walking-the-talk-ask-madeleine/feed/011528Don’t Forget Coaching When Transitioning New Leadershttps://leaderchat.org/2018/09/06/dont-forget-coaching-when-transitioning-new-leaders/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/06/dont-forget-coaching-when-transitioning-new-leaders/#commentsThu, 06 Sep 2018 10:45:18 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11492 Between 50 and 70 percent of executives fail within the first 18 months of being placed in an executive role, whether they are promoted from within or hired from outside the organization, according to research from the Corporate Executive Board.

That statistic is unnecessarily high, say organizational coaching experts Madeleine Homan Blanchard and Patricia Overland. As leaders in the Coaching Services division of The Ken Blanchard Companies, both coaches have seen the research and witnessed firsthand the failure that can occur when leaders are not provided with the support they need to succeed.

“I can’t tell you how many times we’ve coached leaders who were newly promoted because they had a set of skills and good relationships with people,” says Blanchard, “and when they got on the job, they failed.”

It’s not that surprising, she says, given the high expectations set for new leaders and the minimal support they actually receive when transitioning into a new role.

“Leaders are under a lot of pressure to produce results, but they often don’t get the mentoring support they need. The thinking is that at this level they should be able to just do it.”

In conducting interviews with 2,600 Fortune 1000 executives, organizational and leadership consulting firm Navalent found that 76 percent of new executives indicated that the formal development processes of their organization were, at best, minimally helpful in preparing them for their executive role. What’s more, 55 percent of respondents indicated that they had little if any ongoing coaching and feedback to help them refine their ability to perform in an executive role.

“It’s a challenge for HR professionals,” says Overland. “And with the level of change and the number of executives transitioning into new roles, especially in larger organizations, the problem becomes magnified. It’s not uncommon for larger companies to have five executives in transition from five different parts of the company at the same time.

“Even one or two levels below the executive team, all kinds of change is occurring at the VP and director level. It’s always difficult when decision makers move. Now HR finds itself managing several different coaches from different companies, each with their own approaches, contracts, conditions, etc. It can be overwhelming, and that much harder to ensure quality and a return on the investment.

For HR leaders facing this challenge, Overland offers four words of advice: “Don’t go it alone—especially if you are managing a large number of executives in transition across a wide geographical area. This is where working with one company with global reach and a single point of contact really helps. Having one contact person who can help ensure quality, vetting, reporting, and ROI can position an organization to provide successful coaching to every leader who needs it.

“A larger, experienced coaching organization can provide a consistent quality of coaching. Not only is this good for the client and the leaders being coached, it also permits the coaches to talk to each other about how the coaching is going or about the challenges they encounter, and to ask for help when necessary—all without breaching confidentiality.

“This keeps the coaching aligned with organizational objectives and keeps the people focused on priorities,” says Overland.

Be especially careful about going it alone if you are looking to bring the executive coaching function in-house, says Overland.

“In my experience, executives tend to have a real hesitancy to work with an in-house person. They see a risk in disclosing potentially sensitive information to someone junior to them in the organization. Let’s say a senior executive is feeling stressed about a major strategy change, the sale of the company, or a pending merger. The executive won’t want to talk to an internal person about that. An external person is almost always a better choice.”

Blanchard agrees. “Coaching gives people the direction and support they need for the complex, high level leadership and management skills used in a senior role. When I’m thinking about the role of coaching, I always go back to Jim Collins’s book Good to Great,” explains Blanchard. “Collins said that a leader’s job is to get the right people on the bus in the right seats and make sure that the bus is going in the right direction.

“That’s what you are accomplishing when you bring coaching into an organization. You are ensuring that the bus is going in the right direction and all the right people are in the right seats.”

Would you like to learn more about how coaching can improve the success rate of your executives in transition? Join us for a free webinar!

Supporting Leaders in Transition with Coaching

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

9:00 a.m. Pacific Time / 12:00 noon Eastern Time / 5:00 p.m. UK Time

When leaders are in transition—moving from one role to another within the organization, or moving in from an outside organization, ensuring their success is critical. Leaders in transition can’t afford to fail—yet statistics show that a large percentage do.

In this webinar, organizational coaching experts Madeleine Homan Blanchard and Patricia Overland will show you how to leverage transition coaching during an executive’s first 90 to 120 days to ensure your leaders succeed.

Participants will learn:

The 3 types of executive transition

What the latest research reveals

The 4 critical elements you need to build into your transition strategy

Blanchard and Overland will also share best practices and examples from two large company client initiatives. Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how to put these success strategies to work in your organization. This event is free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

I am terrible at my job and it is only a matter of time before I get fired. I don’t like any of my direct reports. I am supposed to do one-on-ones with them, but I find them so boring and whiny I can barely listen to them.

I am making errors because I can barely pay attention. My boss quit unexpectedly about three months ago and my motivation has gone downhill since then. I used to care and love coming to work, but everything has lost its luster. Help! I feel so…

Lost

Hi Lost,

I am so sorry. You sound very downtrodden and sad. You need to get immediate help. Go to HR and find out about any possible Employee Assistance Program that might be available. My company is tiny and there are posters for the EAP in the break room—I’ll bet your company has something that can get you at least a confidential session with a trained counselor.

It sounds like you are in grips of a serious depression, possibly triggered by your boss’s departure. This is not something to shrug off. This is serious, and you need to get help. Depression is fiendish and it makes you feel hopeless, but treatment can help. For more detail about depression try this website.

So the first thing to do is to try to get yourself some professional help. Next, call your best friend or a parent or a sibling—someone you can rely on to have your best interests at heart—and tell them how you are feeling. Get someone who knows you and loves you on your team right now and let them support you in getting the help you need.

Then make a list of things that would normally give you pleasure—playing with a dog, taking a bubble bath, walking in the woods, etc. Get outdoors. If activities that normally give you pleasure do not, then you are definitely suffering from depression. If they do give you some pleasure, all the better.

Please get help.

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/09/01/depression-possibly-triggered-by-work-ask-madeleine/feed/011483The 1 Factor That Determines How Hard Your Team Workshttps://leaderchat.org/2018/08/30/the-1-factor-that-determines-how-hard-your-team-works/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/30/the-1-factor-that-determines-how-hard-your-team-works/#commentsThu, 30 Aug 2018 12:30:42 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11478High performing teams are a joy to watch, aren’t they? Team members are committed to the team’s purpose, each other, and work seamlessly together to achieve the team’s goal. Each person knows his or her role, is highly motivated, and will willingly sacrifice their moment in the spotlight if it helps the team win.

Why? What causes some people to fully commit to the team and give their max effort while others don’t?

It’s trust.

In research conducted by The Ken Blanchard Companies and Training Magazine, over 60% of respondents say the most important factor influencing the effort they give to a team is how much they trust their fellow teammates.

Having high trust in your teammates frees you up to focus on your own contributions without worrying about others following through on their commitments. Trusting your team gives you freedom to take risks, knowing your teammates have your back and will support you. Team trust allows you to have open and honest dialogue and healthy debate that leads to better decision-making, and conflict gets resolved productively instead of people sandbagging issues or sabotaging the efforts of others.

But developing trust in your teammates doesn’t happen by accident; it takes an intentional effort to proactively build trust. There are three major areas to consider in fostering team trust:

Team Leadership Behaviors—The team leader needs to focus on behaviors that provide the right blend of direction and support for individual team members as well as the team as a whole. It’s a delicate balance between the two, because too much focus on directive behavior can lead to micromanaging and the squashing of team member initiative and morale. Leaning too much on supportive behaviors can result in a lax culture where accountability is absent and team productivity is diminished. When team members receive balanced leadership, clear expectations, praise and recognition for achievements, and seeing their leader act in ways that show he/she has the team’s best interests in mind, they are willing to pledge their trust to that leader and their teammates.

Team Culture & Norms—High-trust teams have clear operating norms and a distinctive culture that fosters the development of trust. Decision-making processes are a particularly important aspect of a team’s culture. Processes that allow for open sharing of information, encouraging divergent point of views, and fostering healthy debate among team members are all trust-building actions a team can build into their day-to-day operations.

Personal Trustworthiness—Trust starts with you. If we expect others to grant us trust, then we have to prove ourselves worthy of trust. There are four primary ways we show we our trustworthy. The first is through our ability. Demonstrating competence in our work gives others confidence that we are skilled and knowledgeable and will be able to pull our weight on the team. The second way we demonstrate trustworthiness is by showing we are believable. When we give our word, people can believe it. They know we are honest, act with integrity, and behave in alignment with our values. The third way to show we are worthy of trust is to care about others. People want to know they matter and that their team members care about them as individuals, not just anonymous co-workers. Developing rapport, putting the needs of others ahead of our own, and giving praise and recognition are ways to show our care for others. Finally, the fourth way to demonstrate trustworthiness is being dependable. Dependability means you behave consistently, follow through on commitments, are accountable, and will be there in the clutch when your team needs you.

I think Duke basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski sums it up best in his book, Leading with the Heart, the power that trust brings to teams and organizations:

“In leadership, there are no words more important than trust. In any organization, trust must be developed among every member of the team if success is going to be achieved.” ~ Mike Krzyzewski

Randy Conley is the Vice President of Client Services and Trust Practice Leader at The Ken Blanchard Companies. His LeaderChat posts appear the fourth or last Thursday of every month. For more insights on trust and leadership, visit Randy at his Leading with Trust blog or follow him on Twitter @RandyConley.

I recently took a director level job with a huge Fortune 50 organization. I have been thrown into the deep end and I am worried about completely bombing out. I have had zero onboarding, so I am constantly making errors and spending tons of time backtracking and clearing things up.

I am really trying to do all of the things that Michael Watkins says to do in The First 90 Days, but his methods pre-suppose a sane organization. I am in back-to-back meetings all day, taking work home at night, and I have a list of deliverables as long as my arm.

When I ask my boss about how to prioritize my work, she just looks at me blankly. She clearly expects it to all get done at the same time. I have two direct reports who are already swamped and I am working on hiring a third one.

I am used to getting things done and making an impact, but I can’t do that here. I am literally in despair that I left a great job to jump into this hell. Should I just jump ship before I get fired?

The thing I can say to you is: this stage won’t last. You are going to figure this out and get yourself on an even keel from which you can make a rational decision. Big corporations can feel like lunatic asylums—I know, I have worked in some.

You will find your groove and fit right in. Or you may not. Either way, you will make the choice to stay or go based on the criteria you decide.

So what are your criteria for an organization you want to work for? Examples might be: amazing leadership, the company is making the world a better place, you are making more money and amazing benefits which will allow you to do something you always wanted to do. Make your list. When you feel as if you can breathe again, consult it and see if you are in the right place.

In the meantime, since your boss has no interest in helping you prioritize, you will have to prioritize for yourself. Since you are at director level, your boss probably assumes you know how to do this and expects you to do it. Decide what tasks you think are most important, find something that can get you a win, and focus on that. You might choose wrong—but honestly, what do you have to lose? Do a couple of things well and get your feet under you.

Take a few minutes a day to meditate, calm your brain down, and breathe. Take a deep breath in and exhale. Take care of yourself, eat lunch, and go home at a reasonable hour. You will wake up one day soon and realize you are fine.

Breathe.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/25/feeling-overwhelmed-in-a-new-role-ask-madeleine/feed/611472Crunch Time: How to Be Your Best When it Matters Mosthttps://leaderchat.org/2018/08/24/crunch-time-how-to-be-your-best-when-it-matters-most/
Fri, 24 Aug 2018 18:28:59 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11466

Learn six strategies for turning a pressure situation into an opportunity. In this episode, Judd Hoekstra, coauthor of Crunch Time: How to be Your Best When It Matters Most, talks about the skill of reframing—intentionally thinking about a situation in a new or different way to improve performance.

“When faced with a stressful situation, it is normal to have the fight, flight, or freeze reaction. But what you should do is pause and recognize when you are having negative thoughts—then challenge your thinking to have positive thoughts,” Hoekstra explains. Hoekstra offers six tips for putting reframing into practice.

The first is to reframe from trying harder to trying easier. Contrary to what many of us have been taught, trying harder under pressure is often counterproductive. Think about your best performances. Were you grinding and full of anxiety? More than likely, you remember your best performances as almost effortless. Trying easier isn’t about being lazy or not trying. It is about throttling back just a little. It’s about taking the tension out of what you’re doing and replacing it with a level of effort that allows you to perform in a relaxed state.

The next skill is to reframe from tension to laughter. Humor diffuses pressure better than any pharmaceutical on the market. It momentarily reduces the perceived threat posed by a situation. It also helps generate a sense of control and provides perspective that can help you see dire circumstances with some levity. It also stops cortisol, a stress hormone, in its tracks and releases endorphins—the feel-good neurotransmitters that enhance performance.

Reframing from anxiety to taking control is a skill that can be used in any stressful situation that undermines your performance. Instead of setting lofty goals that can be intimidating, set simple, short-term, bite-sized goals that are attainable. Then you can take control of the situation and perform at a higher level.

Fighting our own doubts is difficult, but it is possible to reframe from doubt to confidence. “When I’m making a presentation but I’m filled with doubt, I think back to a similar situation where I performed at my best level. I visualize that performance—I actually relive the event—to build my confidence and remember that I’ll be using the same tried and true skills that I’ve successfully used before,” says Hoekstra.

Reframing from failure to a learning moment is one of the most useful skills to consider when trying to deliver your best performance. Whether you are an athlete, business person, actor, parent, or teacher, we can all learn from our mistakes. Hoekstra shares how Garry Ridge, CEO of WD-40, has banned the word mistake from the company’s culture. Ridge prefers the term learning moment. People are afraid of making mistakes, but having a learning moment is an opportunity. He asks people to think about what they’ve learned and to share that information with others.

The last skill is to reframe from prepared to overprepared. This skill is especially helpful in pressure situations. A normal amount of preparation is fine, but it won’t serve you well when the pressure is high. Overpreparation allows you to operate instinctively even when things are not going as planned. “Overpreparation is what allowed Michael Phelps to set a world record in the 2008 Olympics even when his goggles were leaking and he couldn’t see the edge of the pool,” says Hoekstra. Overpreparation is the skill that allows you to overcome the unthinkable.

The best thing to remember is that people everywhere, in all kinds of professions, are using reframing skills successfully. They are as helpful to a CEO or athlete as they are to a parent trying to have a positive interaction with their children.Crunch Time: How to be Your Best When It Matters Most

]]>11466Leaders, Use this Approach for Better Employee Accountabilityhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/08/23/leaders-use-this-approach-for-better-employee-accountability/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/23/leaders-use-this-approach-for-better-employee-accountability/#respondThu, 23 Aug 2018 21:05:15 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11456In his work consulting with business leaders at top organizations around the world, best-selling author Ken Blanchard explains that for best results, leaders need to combine a focus on people with a simultaneous focus on results. It’s this one-two combination that delivers the greatest impact.

Managers need to have a shared responsibility with direct reports for achieving goals, explains Blanchard. As an example, Blanchard points to the philosophy of Garry Ridge, CEO of WD-40 Company and Blanchard’s coauthor on the book Helping People Win at Work. At WD-40, if a manager is considering an unfavorable review for a direct report, the first question asked of the manager is: “What have you done to help that person succeed?”

One of the benefits of this mutual accountability approach is that it gives leaders permission to step in when tough love is called for—for example, when performance or behavior is off-track.

Colleen Barrett, former president of Southwest Airlines, shares her organization’s philosophy about joint accountability: “We are very clear in telling our people what our expectations are. We hold them and ourselves accountable for meeting those expectations every day. Sometimes this means having a real heart-to-heart with someone and reminding them what our values are. If we have been intentional and firm in explaining what our expectations are, that gives us the opportunity to point to specific examples where the person hasn’t exhibited the required behaviors.”

Blanchard believes that this approach to management requires a special kind of leader—a person who sees leadership as an opportunity to serve instead of being served.

“We have all seen the negative consequences of self-centered leadership,” says Blanchard. “Today we need a new leadership model—one that is focused on accomplishing the goals of the organization as a whole, with an equal emphasis on people and results. The best leaders identify the hidden strengths in people and organizations and lead them to a place they couldn’t get to on their own. In this way, they truly serve. And when the leader’s work is done—to paraphrase Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu—the people will say, ‘We did it ourselves.’

“The most effective leaders realize that leadership is not about them—they are only as good as the people they lead. It’s what servant leadership is all about. Once a vision has been set for the organization, servant leaders move to the bottom of the hierarchy, acting as cheerleaders, supporters, and encouragers for the people who report to them.

“The best organizations don’t see relationships and results as an either/or proposition,” says Blanchard. “They know if they focus on both people and profits, success will follow.”

Would you like to learn more about creating an others-focused culture in your organization? Join Ken Blanchard for a free webinar on September 12,

I am a senior leader in a large nonprofit. My big struggle is with one employee who seems emotionally unstable. One day she is completely reasonable and easygoing, and the next she is reactive and flying off the handle for no apparent reason.

I’ve learned to expect it, but her behavior is affecting the rest of the team. They are walking on eggshells and one of them recently came to me for help on dealing with the situation.

It feels really personal to talk to someone about this, and I don’t know where to start.

Walking on Eggshells

Dear Walking on Eggshells,

It is your job as a leader to make sure everyone feels safe. It is not okay that your direct report is freaking out other employees. So, I am afraid you are going to have to get personal here.

First, since you are in a large organization, involve HR and start documenting. Document every complaint, every outburst, and every disruption.

Your employee may be going through a rough time personally. If so, encourage her to avail herself of counseling through your Employee Assistance Program.

If it is a self-awareness issue, work with your training department to find her a class or some coaching.

If it is bigger than a rough time, she might be suffering from a mental illness. I am not a doctor but I can tell you that one of the books about Borderline Personality Disorder is called Stop Walking on Eggshells.

In any case, you have to set some distinct boundaries by clearly stating to her which of her behaviors are acceptable and which are not. Be direct, be concise, be clear, and keep the tone neutral. Tell her you will be paying attention and will let her know when you see behavior that is over the line. Be strong and fierce.

If she can get it together and behave herself at work, great. If she can’t, she gets a couple of warnings and then she’s out. Just because you can let her behavior roll off your back doesn’t make it acceptable. It would be one thing if your employee weren’t disrupting others, but she is—so you are obligated to do something to make it stop.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

I head up one of several R&D teams at a global consumer goods company. My team is amazing—brilliant, eccentric, creative, fun people who are blowing away their goals. (It takes a certain type of person to be good at what we do.)

Here is my problem. Some of my folks are good at the basics—showing up on time for meetings, submitting expenses, dressing appropriately, filling out paperwork, etc. But the others not so much. I am constantly on them to comply with the bare minimum of what is required to operate in this large system. Case in point: conducting performance reviews.

I know some managers who can throw all the rules to the wind and allow their creatives to operate as they please, but I just can’t do it. I have spoken to my own boss and my peers to get some ideas about how to get people to toe the line, but they all just laugh and say I’ll figure it out. I don’t have kids but I am starting to feel like a parent. It is making me really…

Cranky

Dear Cranky,

Presumably, you manage these people because you are one of them. Are you not eccentric and creative yourself? How did the person previously in your position handle this problem? You must have leadership skills to have been so attractive to the best. Your people are doing well because you have created an environment in which they can thrive—and yet, you have also led them to think that they can get away with, well, acting like children.

I am married to an eccentric creative, I manage a bunch of wildly creative people, and I am a parent. And still, my least strong suit is getting people to do tedious stuff they have to do, so I really do feel your pain. I must be clear, concise and relentless about what is necessary. Repetition and reminders without judgment are helpful. And however strong the temptation might be, I do not shield other adults from the consequences of their choices.

Your job as a manager is to clearly inform your people of the consequences of not complying with requirements. Putting a time limit on getting the performance review done might work: if something isn’t done in a certain time frame, they don’t get a raise. You may have already thought of this. I know with my huge team, we have finally resorted to not paying expenses that are submitted more than 30 days after the event. That works for some, but others just don’t care about money.

Another idea is to go to HR and see what special dispensation you might be able to get for your team. It may not be possible, but I know a lot of the large global companies are trying to be more flexible about these things. Maybe you could be a pilot program for some new, easier methods in this area.

Finally, leverage the genius of your team. Put this conundrum in front of them to solve. This is not your problem alone. It is draining you now and will begin to drain the energy of your team soon as well. Let them apply some of their brilliance and creativity—maybe even some old-fashioned peer pressure—to shift this situation.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/11/are-your-creatives-making-you-cranky-ask-madeleine/feed/011442Servant Leadership: It’s Time for a New Leadership Modelhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/08/06/servant-leadership-its-time-for-a-new-leadership-model/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/06/servant-leadership-its-time-for-a-new-leadership-model/#commentsMon, 06 Aug 2018 18:35:25 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11421Too many leaders have been conditioned to think of leadership only in terms of power and control. But there is a better way to lead, says best-selling business author Ken Blanchard—one that combines equal parts serving and leading. This kind of leadership requires a special kind of leader: a servant leader.

“In this model,” says Blanchard, “Leaders assume a traditional role to set the vision, direction, and strategy for the organization—the leadership aspect of servant leadership. After the vision and direction are set, the leaders turn the organizational pyramid upside down so that they serve the middle managers and frontline people who serve the customer. Now the leader’s role shifts to a service mindset for the task of implementation—the servant aspect of servant leadership.”

Many organizations and leaders get into trouble during implementation, warns Blanchard.

“When command-and-control leaders are at the helm, the traditional hierarchical pyramid is kept alive and well. All of the organization’s energy moves up the hierarchy, away from customers and frontline folks who are closest to the action. When there is a conflict between what customers want and what the boss wants, the boss wins.”

Blanchard suggests that leadership, learning, and talent development professionals correct this situation by philosophically turning the traditional hierarchical pyramid upside down—putting customer contact people at the top of the organization and top management at the bottom.

“This philosophical mind-shift reminds everyone in the organization that when it comes to implementation, leaders serve their people, who serve the customers. This change may seem minor, but it makes a major difference between who is responsible and who is responsive.”

The next step, according to Blanchard, is to align policies, practices, direction, and support to remove barriers for the people who are taking care of customers. This high-investment approach to talent management is designed to bring out the best in everyone.

“Servant leaders are constantly trying to find out what their people need to perform well and live according to their organization’s vision. In top organizations, leaders believe if they do a good job serving their people and showing them they care, the employees will, in turn, practice that same philosophy with customers.”

The Biggest Barrier to Servant Leadership

In looking back at all of the organizations he has worked with over the years, one of the most persistent barriers to more people becoming successful servant leaders is a heart motivated by self-interest, says Blanchard.

“As a leader, you must ask yourself why you lead. Is it to serve or to be served? Answering this question in a truthful way is so important. You can’t fake being a servant leader. I believe if leaders don’t get the heart part right, they simply won’t ever become servant leaders.

“Managers who somehow have themselves as the center of the universe and think everything must rotate around them are really covering up not-okay feelings about themselves. This is an ego problem that manifests as fear or false pride. When you don’t feel good about yourself, you have two options. You can hide and hope nobody notices you, or you can overcompensate and go out and try to control your environment. I always say that people who feel the need to control their environment are really just scared little kids inside.”

“I learned from the late Norman Vincent Peale that the best leaders combine a healthy self-acceptance with humility. As I learned from Norman, “Leaders with humility don’t think less of themselves—they just think about themselves less.”

An Old Model for a New World of Work?

Blanchard explains that leaders with a servant heart thrive on developing people and helping them achieve their goals. They constantly try to find out what their people need to perform well. Being a servant leader is not just another management technique. It is a way of life for those with servant hearts.

“When I first began to teach managers back in the late 1960s I met Robert Greenleaf, who was just retiring as a top AT&T executive. Bob talked about servant leadership—the concept that effective leaders and managers need to serve their people, not be served by them. It was entirely new thinking then. In many ways, Bob is considered the father of the term servant leadership.”

It is much easier for people to see the importance and relevance of servant leadership today than it was back then, says Blanchard.

“Today when people see you as a judge and critic, they spend most of their time trying to please you rather than accomplishing the organization’s goals and moving in the direction of the desired vision. ‘Boss watching’ becomes a popular sport and people get promoted on their upward-influencing skills. That role doesn’t do much for accomplishing a clear vision. People try to protect themselves rather than move the organization in its desired direction.

“Servant leaders are constantly trying to find out what their people need to be successful. Rather than wanting their people to please them, they want to make a difference in the lives of their people—and, in the process, impact the organization.”

Servant Leadership: The Power of Love, Not the Love of Power

A few years ago, Blanchard received a letter from a man in New Zealand with a line that he believes sums up his leadership philosophy.

“The man wrote that he felt I was in the business of teaching people the power of love rather than the love of power.

“I believe the world is in desperate need of a different leadership role model. We need servant leadership advocates. Spread the word to everyone who will listen! And remember: your job is to teach people the power of love rather than the love of power.”

Would you like to learn more about creating a servant leadership culture and leading at a higher level? Join us for a free webinar with Ken Blanchard!

In this special event for leadership, learning, and talent development professionals, best-selling business author Ken Blanchard looks at servant leadership and how to create an others-focused culture in your organization. You’ll learn how to:

Set your sights on the right target and vision. Great organizations focus on three bottom lines instead of just one. In addition to financial success, Ken will share how leaders at great organizations measure the satisfaction and engagement levels of their employees as well as their customers.

Treat your customers right. To keep your customers today, you can’t be content to just satisfy them. Ken will share how to create raving fans—customers who are so excited about the way you treat them that they want to tell others.

Treat your people right. You can’t treat your people poorly and expect them to treat your customers well. Ken will share how treating your people right includes setting clear, meaningful goals, providing day-to-day coaching, and finally, setting up performance reviews so that there are no surprises.

Develop the right kind of leaders. The most effective leaders recognize that leadership is not about them and that they are only as good as the people they lead. Ken will share how servant leadership principles can guide the design of your leadership development curriculum.

Ready to take your organization to the next level? Don’t miss this opportunity to explore how to create an others-focused culture and leadership development strategy based on the principles of servant leadership. The event is free courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

I am a new manager. I have twelve folks reporting to me and it is going perfectly, except for one person (I will call him “A”). There seems to be a fundamental disconnect between how he sees his own performance (superior) and how others see his performance (subpar). I am continually confused by this disparity because it is so obvious to everyone but A.

For example, we just had a performance review cycle where A’s peers identified that he submits work for group projects that is not well thought through, is loaded with errors, and, in some cases, is not even the piece he was supposed to be working on. A’s own self-assessment was that he is way ahead of everyone else and that he should get both a bonus and a promotion!

I don’t so much want advice on what to do; my company has provided good training and I know how to have the right conversations with A. I just don’t understand how a person can be so oblivious to their own faults and deluded about their own capabilities. How does this happen?

Need an Explanation

Dear Need an Explanation,

Oh, if only I could explain this! This is one of those questions that has stumped countless philosophers through the ages. This personality quirk has been a great source of entertainment, not the least of which is exemplified in the character of Michael Scott in the TV show “The Office.” I agree it is confounding—and it also makes me constantly worried that others might think this about me! Self-awareness is just so tricky.

What we are talking about here is known in my business as Emotional Intelligence, which comprises awareness of self, awareness of others, and the ability to modulate or regulate oneself to be successful with others. The research shows that high emotional intelligence is a success indicator—and that the kind of obliviousness A demonstrates will eventually curtail his ambitions.

In our book Leverage Your Best—Ditch the Rest, Scott Blanchard and I offer the Three Perspectives, which are:

How do see myself?

How do others see me?

How do I need to be seen to be successful in this situation?

Once a person has a sense of how to answer those questions, they can figure out what to do about them. In the meantime, I cannot explain how someone can be as oblivious as A seems to be. We can speculate—and goodness knows I do, all the time. Maybe it is all an act and A is worried sick about measuring up, so he is overcompensating. Maybe he had parents who raised him to believe he could do no wrong. Who knows? Ultimately, it doesn’t matter. I think the better question may be this: how can you help A? You may simply want to present the disconnect and ask him what he thinks about it. He may have something interesting to say.

Good luck,

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/08/04/is-one-of-your-direct-reports-out-of-touch-with-reality-ask-madeleine/feed/111416A Coach Approach to Giving Feedback – 4 Lessons Learned from a Coaching Perspectivehttps://leaderchat.org/2018/07/31/a-coach-approach-to-giving-feedback-4-lessons-learned-from-a-coaching-perspective/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/31/a-coach-approach-to-giving-feedback-4-lessons-learned-from-a-coaching-perspective/#commentsTue, 31 Jul 2018 12:12:57 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11404Those of us who work with or are followers of Ken Blanchard have all heard the expression “Feedback is the breakfast of champions.” We’ve also read dozens of examples of when and how to give feedback to get to best possible outcome. Read on for a slightly different take on how to approach feedback.

As a professional coach, I often give feedback to my clients. I also give feedback to coaches I work with who are delivering coaching to our Blanchard clients. I’ve learned four valuable lessons that can make feedback something to be treasured rather than feared.

Lesson 1: What you believe is as important as what you say. If I’m annoyed with someone for flubbing up in front of a client, and now I’m in the hot seat hoping to save an account, I’m likely to rain down on my team with fire and brimstone. Oops! I’ve just terrified everyone into flight or freeze. On the other hand, if I genuinely believe people don’t make mistakes on purpose, I’m more likely to explore with my team what happened and how we might recover—and treat the mistake as a learning moment. In this way, we have participated together in a genuine learning experience that will help the team grow and keep them from making the same mistake again.

Lesson 2: Assume the best. This is a riff on lesson 1. Assume your team wants to perform well. Assume mistakes will be made. Help your team understand when to get you involved and give them the autonomy to make course corrections without you.

Lesson 3: Be specific in your redirection. It’s not enough to point out a mistake. The mistake is often obvious. What’s sometimes not so clear is exactly what you want them to do differently in the future. For example, I recently told one of my team members that it wasn’t necessary to send a long introductory communication to a new client. But then he kept doing it. I learned he interpreted my “not necessary” as meaning “Okay to do if it makes you feel good.” What I should have said to him was “Don’t send an email with the same information that has already been sent. Let’s craft together a better message for you to send.”

Lesson 4: Water the flowers. You read that right. Watering the flowers is a metaphor for recognizing the hard work your team is putting in. Thank them often, and publicly. Be specific here, too—acknowledge what’s going well. As Ken Blanchard says, praise is free. And, like flowers in the rain, we thrive when we get enough.

How do these four lessons support a coach approach? Because to be a great coach you have to know your own mind and adjust, flex, and control your thoughts (some would call this emotional intelligence). Giving feedback is life’s blood to a coach. Without the ability to do so, we would simply be cheerleaders for our clients—which would be fun but not nearly as effective. And as coaches, we are in service to our clients. We do what needs to be done in order to help the client grow, learn, and achieve desired outcomes. Don’t we owe that to our teams, too?

About the Author

Patricia Overland is a Coaching Solutions Partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 150 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I am a mid-level manager with a large team in a low-profile but significant government agency. I say significant because substantial numbers of citizens depend on us for critical services.

The chaos here has been profound over the last year or so. Senior leaders keep quitting or getting fired, mandates turn on a dime, and my boss is so demoralized that most days she just comes to work and shuts her office door. She could be playing solitaire on her computer all day, for all anyone can tell.

The mission and goals for my team are straightforward, though, so we keep plugging along and serving our constituents. I have lost some of my best people who have gone to the private sector—and because of the leadership vacuum and the budget freezes I have not been able to replace them. Of course, this has put more pressure on my remaining people.

I don’t know how much longer we can go on this way. I am very close to retirement so I know I can hang on, but I feel terrible for my people. I would need to hire at least five people in order to do the job we are supposed to be doing.

I am running out of steam here and I’m tired of fighting with no support.

Feeling Paralyzed

Dear Feeling Paralyzed,

Wow. This sounds like an exhausting and tricky situation. But you are not ready to walk away, so you might as well create a plan to keep going.

It sounds like you don’t have much to lose—which in a messed-up way could afford you an opportunity here. This would really depend on your relationship with your boss, but I wonder if you could knock on her door, interrupt her game of solitaire, and request her assistance. Tell her you need her and you need guidance, direction, and support to solve the problems you are grappling with. Maybe she’ll buck up and get her head back in the game.

If you can’t do that, I guess you are truly on your own. I mean, seriously, it sounds like there isn’t anyone paying enough attention to fire you! Go ahead and submit requests for hires to HR and see if you can get that ball rolling. If that won’t work, you will just have to do your best with the hand you’ve been given.

Look at the numbers and figure out what you can do with your limited work force. Explain your thinking to your team and inspire them to do their best with a lousy situation. You probably won’t be able to do everything you want to do, or feel you should do, but you can do something. The people you serve will really appreciate it.

What else can you do but your very best? Who is going to stop you?

Fight on!

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

In this episode, Alex Hutchinson shares what he learned from ten years of researching human performance. He explains that whether you are running a marathon, building a career, or raising a family, you will have fundamental struggles. And even though the situations are very different, the struggles are similar. “Human achievement relies upon the ability to endure?and your ability to push forward in any circumstance will separate the very successful times from the less successful times,” explains Hutchinson. Here are a few of the fascinating concepts he shares:

Although some limits we experience feel physical, many are dictated by the brain. That doesn’t mean we can ignore those limits, but we need to realize they are more changeable than we think. If, for example, you are struggling to win a race or fighting to stay awake during a presentation, you are hitting a limit. Being able to recognize the difference between apparent and actual limits is at the heart of understanding what endurance is all about.

Your beliefs could be the most powerful asset you have for improving performance. Believing you can do something is part of the trick. The method of creating belief doesn’t happen overnight?it takes time and effort to build confidence. And confidence improves performance. Tricking yourself that you are performing better than you actually are can bridge the gap between what your brain thinks you can do and what your body really can do. Deception is useful to show you what is possible to achieve; however, it isn’t a great method for sustaining performance.

Understand that mental fatigue is as real and as tiring as physical fatigue. Research shows that looking at a computer screen for a few hours can cause changes in your brain chemistry that result in mental fatigue?and that can damage your physical performance. So, if you are in the office powering through a project on your computer, maybe the best thing you can do is get up and take a walk outside to refresh your mental state and then get back to your project with renewed energy.

Pain causes discomfort that slows us down. An athlete experiences physical pain, but someone making a presentation or speech can also feel pain. The good news is that pain tolerance can be developed. To push the limits of your endurance, you need to get comfortable being uncomfortable.

Nutrition plays a huge role in your performance. It’s obvious that physical endurance depends on food and water, but a nutritious diet is also important for brain function. There is no silver bullet diet?you must find what works best for you.

Finally, Hutchinson explains the importance of optimism and believing in yourself. He reminds us that “The experience of a limit is a sensation in the brain. It isn’t easy to change, but it isn’t as absolute as it feels. Don’t take the feeling of hitting a limit as a signal of failure, but as a signal to look for another way to accomplish your goal.”

]]>1138710 Ways Leaders Aren’t Making Time for their Team Members (Infographic)https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/26/10-ways-leaders-arent-making-time-for-their-team-members-infographic-2/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/26/10-ways-leaders-arent-making-time-for-their-team-members-infographic-2/#respondThu, 26 Jul 2018 14:08:15 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11382Performance planning, coaching, and review are the foundation of any well-designed performance management system, but the results of a recent study suggest that leaders are falling short in meeting the expectations of their direct reports.

Researchers from The Ken Blanchard Companies teamed up with Training magazine to poll 456 human resource and talent-management professionals. The purpose was to determine whether established best practices were being leveraged effectively.

The survey found gaps of 20-30 percent between what employees wanted from their leaders and what they were experiencing in four key areas: Performance Planning (setting clear goals), Day-to-Day Coaching (helping people reach their targets), Performance Evaluation (reviewing results), and Job and Career Development (learning and growing.)

Use this link to download a PDF version of a new infographic that shows the four key communication gaps broken down into ten specific conversations leaders should be having with their team members.

Are your leaders having the performance management conversations they should be? If you find similar gaps, address them for higher levels of employee work passion and performance.

You can read more about the survey (and see the Blanchard recommendations for closing communication gaps) by accessing the original article, 10 Performance Management Process Gaps, at the Training magazine website.

I started a new job about six months ago. My boss warned me about one of my direct reports—he said she was argumentative and difficult.

For the first few months I thought she was okay, but now I’m beginning to see what my boss meant. She is hostile in meetings. She agrees to things and then tells others how much she disagrees with me. She does not keep her commitments and then gives me lame excuses when I call her on it.

Yesterday she sent me an email calling me names that made my jaw drop. She was rude and inappropriate to the point where I wonder if she might have a mental problem.

In the meantime, my boss was let go—and I don’t really feel comfortable taking this to my new boss. I am just blown away by this woman’s insubordination and I honestly don’t know what I should do next.

Tolerating Insubordination

Dear Tolerating,

Stop tolerating. Draw some boundaries. But first, do some research and groundwork.

I always recommend starting by giving folks the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she has good reasons to behave the way she is behaving. It’s possible that your former boss’s attitude toward her has put her on the defensive. You can certainly call for a sit-down. Share your experience and ask how you might be able to craft a more productive working relationship. For more direction on having a hard conversation, you can refer to a previous post in this column. See how that goes. Maybe you can turn this around.

I think as the new manager, it is your job to give it your best effort to make this work by making clear requests for changes and giving her a chance to improve her behavior. But if you get no traction, you have to be fierce and decisive or you risk getting dragged down very quickly. She can easily poison other employees against you and the company if she hasn’t already.

Call out unacceptable behaviors as soon as they happen and provide redirection. If you find yourself unable to do so, ask yourself what you are afraid of. What power does she have that she has been getting away with this nonsense since long before you arrived at the company? Probably none, but she has somehow cowed your former boss and is now doing it to you.

Put up the hand and make it stop. Talk to your new boss and your HR partner and start the process of documenting every time she does something that undermines the team. There is no reason for you to put up with nastiness and lack of productivity—how can you possibly get your work done? Maybe she will back down—people who are just plain bullies often do when challenged. But if she keeps it up, call the game and replace her with someone who will do the job, have a good attitude, and be a pleasure to work with. As you well know, you can teach skills but you must hire for attitude.

It is my experience that managers who spend the bulk of their time on bad apples like your direct report never, ever regret showing them the door. Get your ducks in a row and keep a record of the bad behavior—how beautiful that you have concrete evidence in an email!

Sometimes people behave so badly that we question our own assessment and even our sanity or theirs. You are at that point, which is way too far past the pale. So give it one last shot to get on the same page—and if it doesn’t work, just say no. No, no, no. No.

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

One element within the feedback conversation—redirection—tends to be especially challenging for managers. It focuses on those times when a manager must provide feedback that a direct report’s current performance is off-track.

In their book The New One Minute Manager, coauthors Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson lay out a time-tested approach to help managers deliver needed feedback. Here are 4 key takeaways you can use to improve your feedback skills.

Do your homework

Before you rush to deliver feedback, make sure clear agreements about goals, norms, roles, and expectations have been established. Often the root cause of poor performance is a lack of clarity around goals. Verify with your direct report that the two of you are operating from the same set of expectations. Many performance issues can be rectified at this stage.

Focus on behavior

If goals are clear but there is a gap between expectations and observed performance, talk about it with your direct report. Describe their behavior in specific, not general, terms. Use a neutral tone to ward off any sense of blame or judgment—remember, you are addressing the behavior, not criticizing the person. The goal is not to tear people down; it is to build them up. As Blanchard and Johnson explain, “When our self-concept is under attack, we feel a need to defend ourselves and our actions, even to the extent of distorting the facts. When people become defensive, they don’t learn.”

Let it sink in

After giving feedback, pause for a moment so you both can process the situation. Let your direct report feel your concern as well as their own.

Move on

When it’s over, it’s over. Don’t dwell on the experience. Be sure to reaffirm your belief, trust, and respect for your team member so that when your meeting is over they are thinking about how they can improve their performance, not about how you mistreated them. Expect that the feedback will be received and acted upon. And be ready to endorse and praise performance when you see improvement.

Giving performance feedback is a critical job responsibility of any manager, but it can be a daunting task for many people—especially when the feedback is less than positive. Managers don’t want to generate negative emotions, damage relationships, or make a bad situation worse. As a result, managers often delay or avoid giving necessary feedback, allowing poor performance to continue.

Don’t let that happen to you or to the people in your organization. With a little practice you can develop the skill of delivering feedback in a way that changes behavior while keeping the relationship intact. Feedback is an essential managerial skill. Take an extra minute to improve your skills in this important area!

I hear that statement all the time from my coaching clients. I get it—no one wants to be known as a boss who hovers over people and tells them what to do all the time. However, what I’ve noticed with some clients who desperately do not want to micromanage is that they often go to the other extreme and completely abdicate their leadership responsibilities.

So how does abdicating—which we also label as under-supervising—frustrate? Let’s look at one common example.

Under-supervision is most damaging when a leader says to a direct report who is unfamiliar with a task, “I know you will be fine. Just let me know when you’re done.” The direct report very likely won’t be able to do a task they haven’t been trained to do. Then, when the task becomes difficult or the person experiences some natural early failure, it’s normal for them to think, “My boss thinks I can do this. There must be something wrong with me!”

This begins a stream of negative self-talk, which can kill creativity. People in this state rarely give themselves permission to be a learner, to take risks, or to experiment with possible solutions. Isolation can also set in. People are often hesitant to reveal that they don’t know something—and are even less likely to do so if they think their boss expects them to know it.

Finally, forward motion is thwarted. When someone doesn’t know how to do something and doesn’t have anyone to guide them, they will often work on the tasks they do know how to do and set the other task aside. It appears to be human nature. I’ve witnessed people who are otherwise brilliant do this many times.

I’m convinced that abdicating behavior from a manager can be just as frustrating to a direct report as the dreaded micromanaging. The ideal balance would be to provide the right kind of leadership style depending on direct report’s development level on whatever task or goal they are working on. As Ken Blanchard says, a leader needs to “Slow down to go faster.” Here’s how it works:

With your direct report, articulate the goal for any assigned work. Express what a good job would look like. And this is a vital step: have your direct report repeat back to you what they heard you say about the goal and the desired objective. This will ensure you are both on the same page.

Next, ask the person how they would go about achieving the goal. And then really listen.

If they list out what they would do and it sounds like a good plan, send them on their way with your blessing. Of course, always let them know you are there if they need anything along the way.

On the other hand, if you hear “I’m not sure,” “I haven’t done this before,” or other statements of self-doubt, take it as a sign the person needs more supervision. Partner with them to create a plan for getting the job done—and be sure to check in with them regularly.

I always think using this style is like offering a thirsty person trekking through the desert some water. It’s giving them something they desperately need.

The hope is that a direct report who isn’t yet self-reliant on a task will grow and develop autonomy as they go forward. As the direct report develops competence and confidence doing the task, you, as the leader, can pull back on supervision.

Matching your leadership style to the specific needs of your direct reports will allow you to always correctly supervise versus under- or over-supervising. In this way, your leadership actions will always be just right!

About the Author

Joanne Maynard is a senior coach with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 130 coaches have worked with over 14,500 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I have been with the same organization for eight years. My company offers anyone who has been here for seven years a reduced pay, three-month sabbatical. My boss keeps pestering me to schedule it and take one. (I totally get that this is a good problem for me to have.)

I don’t have a partner or kids. I know I should take advantage of this opportunity, but I have no idea what to do! I have been thinking about it for years and have always thought something would come to me, but it hasn’t. I am interested in a few things, but none quite enough to take a pay cut and leave the flow of my job.

I am at the point now where I think maybe I’m just not that interesting a person if all I really care about is my job. I am also worried that I will take my sabbatical, it won’t be the best thing ever, and I will have wasted my time and money. Any ideas would be appreciated because I feel stumped and—

Pressured

Dear Pressured,

I think the pressure to do something brilliant with your sabbatical makes it hard to be creative. My first thought was how jealous I am—but then I started wondering what the heck I would do if I had three months of footloose and fancy free. It is, in fact, kind of hard unless you’ve always wanted to write a book or travel all over the world, or unless you have an extensive bucket list.

I don’t know that you need my ideas, but I do have a couple of thoughts for you. Maybe, if we’re lucky, my readers will have some more suggestions in the comment section.

What do you do in your free time? There might be some clues there. If you cook, maybe cooking school? If you do yoga, a yoga retreat?

Do you volunteer? Maybe there are service opportunities in that area.

You could go talk to your HR partner and see what other people have done. Your company may have service opportunities for sabbaticals in place. One of the organizations we work with has something called a Social Sabbatical where employees get to go do service work for a month. The company that organizes it is called Pyxera Global.

Talk to your friends. If you have always talked about wanting to do something specific, they will know.

Is there something specific you could learn that would make you even better at your job? That might be an avenue.

The most important thing is to do a bunch of research. Then put a stake in the ground and take the leap. Just changing up your routine and learning something new will be good for your brain and your soul. It probably doesn’t have to be the whole three months—maybe you will only want to take a month or two. Anything you do will be an experience and a learning opportunity. But if you don’t take the opportunity to do something, I am afraid you will regret it.

Let me know what you end up choosing.

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/14/afraid-youre-becoming-boring-ask-madeleine/feed/011359Elena Botelho on The CEO Next Doorhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/07/10/elena-botelho-on-the-ceo-next-door/
Tue, 10 Jul 2018 16:58:06 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11339What does it take to become a world-class leader? In this episode of the LeaderChat Podcast, we speak with Elena Botelho, coauthor of The CEO Next Door: The 4 Behaviors that Transform Ordinary People into World-Class Leaders.

“Most ideals about why people are successful are driven by stereotypes and gut feel rather than facts and data,” explains Botelho. “In this book, we’ve aspired to provide information about how anyone can be successful by helping readers learn from other successful people in business.”

Learnings shared in the book are based on groundbreaking research and in-depth analysis of more than 2,600 leaders drawn from a database of more than 17,000 CEO and C-suite executives. Botelho describes the four behaviors of highly successful people as identified by the research.

They are decisive and understand the importance of speed over precision when making decisions. According to Botelho, most people assume that CEOs have an uncanny ability to make the right decisions more often than other people. But her research indicates that what really makes a CEO stand out isn’t necessarily the accuracy of their decision, but the speed and will to make the decision in the first place.

They are reliable and deliver what they promise, when they promise it—without exception. This behavior sounds simple, but isn’t easy to practice consistently. Botelho describes the importance of being on time and doing what you say you’re going to do—and she offers another tip: “Highly reliable leaders are thoughtful about setting expectations right up front.” Botelho shares that this behavior not only improves the likelihood you will succeed in your role, but also increases your chances of being hired In the first place.

They adapt boldly, especially when faced with the discomfort of the unknown. “Of the four behaviors, this is the one where people are most likely to underestimate their ability—and that is costly.” Botelho explains people naturally assume change will be painful, so they resist it. But her research shows that the most successful leaders are good at letting go of past behaviors, habits, and commitments that will not serve them in the future.

They engage with stakeholders without shying away from conflict. These leaders focus on leading to deliver results that benefit the company as opposed to leading to be liked. They keep all stakeholders—customers, employees, and shareholders—in mind and manage those relationships.

Finally, Botelho shares some counterintuitive insights about making great strides in your career—what she calls career catapults. “Sometimes it is better to go small in order to go big,” Botelho says. Having an elite MBA or working for a marquee company is a great way to advance your career, but sometimes taking what looks like a side step instead of always focusing on moving up the ladder can have a more positive impact. By being in charge of a smaller project, division, or group, you might actually have a chance to practice more skills and get more exposure.

According to the author, here is the most important message to take away from The CEO Next Door and this podcast: Excellence is more achievable for us than we assume.

Be sure to stay tuned for comments from Ken Blanchard at the end of the podcast!

Check out this episode!

]]>113393 Conversations All Managers Need to Masterhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/07/10/3-conversations-all-managers-need-to-master/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/10/3-conversations-all-managers-need-to-master/#respondTue, 10 Jul 2018 13:56:02 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11341Managers don’t have enough high quality conversations with their direct reports, according to Ann Phillips, a senior consulting partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies. This deficiency has a negative effect on both productivity and morale.

“Part of effective communication between manager and direct report is a mindset and part is a skillset. Both are required,” says Phillips. “It’s easy for managers to convince themselves they don’t have time for quality conversations, especially when they aren’t particularly interested in having them and don’t really know how to do it.

“Every manager I’ve worked with has so much of their own work to do all day, every day, that some can’t see their way clear to spending time with the folks who work for them—other than performance reviews, rushed interactions, or crises,” explains Phillips. “Conversations between these managers and their people are mostly manager-led directives of ‘this is what I want you to do; here’s how to do it.’ The manager is focused on getting stuff done and on what needs to happen—not on their direct reports’ career growth or needs.

“Unfortunately, when individual contributors in this scenario become managers, they treat people exactly the way they were treated. Sub-quality conversations become a cultural norm.”

The good news, according to Phillips, is that managers can learn to be more effective in their work conversations.

“If a manager has the right mindset and training, it’ll drive the right behavior,” says Phillips. She recommends focusing on three specific conversations to get started.

The Goal-Setting Conversation

“All good performance begins with clear goals. Effective goal-setting conversations begin with clarity—what to do, by when, and what a good job looks like,” says Phillips. “Be specific—and don’t be afraid to ask questions. It’s critically important to take the time to make sure both parties are interpreting the same words in the same way to avoid misunderstandings.

“Conversations and relationships can go sideways when people interpret things differently but don’t have a conversation about that interpretation. Never assume!”

This leads to the second important conversation at which managers need to excel—giving feedback.

The Feedback Conversation

“A friend of mine recently told me I tend to hijack conversations,” says Phillips. “The funny thing is, I was just about to tell her she does the same thing! We discovered that what I interpret as hijacking and what she interprets as hijacking are two different things.

“We talked about how, when she’s talking and pauses to think, I rush in to fill the empty space. It goes back to my experience at home. In my family, you talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, and there are no pauses. So when my friend goes silent, I fill in the gap and start talking about something.

“Then I explained to her that I feel she hijacks the conversation when I tell her about something happening in my life and she immediately turns it into a discussion about something that’s happening in her life. It’s related, but it still feels to me like she is making it about her.

“Because we are committed to our friendship, we’re willing to discuss things that are uncomfortable and to consider each other’s point of view. That’s important at work, too. Managers and direct reports need to have the type of relationship where they can talk honestly. When a manager cares about a direct report as a human being—and vice versa—they build up an emotional bank account they can draw from. That allows them to have difficult conversations when they need to.”

Sadly, the word feedback has a negative connotation in business today, says Phillips.

“People seldom think of feedback as praise or recognition. When people hear that word, they think at best it’s going to be constructive criticism. But it rarely feels constructive—it just feels like criticism.

“It’s another area where most managers don’t have the skills they need—especially feedback around performance improvement and redirection. Managers are so concerned about how someone might respond to feedback, they tend to avoid it altogether.”

One way managers can be more successful when preparing to give feedback is to make sure they are coming at it from the right place.

“Your feedback can’t be based on your own personal agenda,” says Phillips. “It has to be about helping other people be successful or otherwise improving the team. If you come from a personal agenda, your feedback will come across poorly.

“In my conversation with my friend, she gave me the feedback about the way I hijack conversations because she wanted our conversations to be better. I knew that, and it gave me a chance to think about my behavior and run it over in my mind. That was a good learning for me—to recognize that behavior I picked up from my family might be misinterpreted when I’m dealing with other people.”

The One-on-One Conversation

Listening and focusing on the other person’s agenda is especially important when managers conduct one-on-one conversations with their direct reports, says Phillips.

“It’s easy to fall into the manager’s agenda, where one-on-ones can turn into a review of how the direct report is doing on each of their goals. At The Ken Blanchard Companies, we teach managers to schedule semi-monthly one-on-ones, where the agenda is driven by the individual contributor and what they need.”

The manager’s primary role is to listen and provide support, says Phillips. Senior leaders are generally better at this than are new managers.

“At the senior levels of an organization, a VP typically will have more experience asking a direct report how things are going and finding out what the direct report needs to succeed. As you move down to the frontlines of an organization, managers are less experienced at taking the lead in a conversation like that.”

Especially at the frontlines, Phillips observes, managers and supervisors need training in how to have effective one-on-one conversations. Otherwise, the direct report is likely to default to the manager and ask the manager what they want talk about.

“It’s important to teach managers to ask open-ended questions about what an individual contributor’s needs are. Suppose the direct report comes into the meeting with a blank piece of paper and says, ‘What do you want talk about?’ The manager should take that opening and say, ‘Let’s talk about some things you are working on. Let’s list the three or four tasks, discuss your development level, and talk about how I can help you.’ Eventually, that direct report will become more proactive and learn to take the lead in those conversations.”

It’s a process and a joint responsibility—one where everybody benefits, says Phillips.

“Leaders influence through the power of their conversations. Train your managers—and your individual contributors—in the skills they need for more effective conversations at work. It’s one of the best ways to improve performance and satisfaction.”

Would you like to learn more about improving the quality and frequency of conversations in your organization? Then join us for a free webinar!

Managers influence and lead through the words they use and the communication skills they apply. In this webinar, Blanchard senior consulting partner Ann Phillips will share the three types of conversations managers must know how to conduct.

The Goal-Setting Conversation—how to set goals collaboratively with a focus on motivation.

The Feedback Conversation—how to praise performance when it is aligned and how to redirect performance when it is off track.

The One-on-One Conversation—how to set aside time to hear from direct reports using high levels of inquiry and listening.

Don’t miss this opportunity to evaluate how your organization is currently addressing performance management. Learn the elements of masterful performance management and how to apply these principles in your own organization. Ann will share tips and strategies you can put into practice immediately. The event is free, courtesy of The Ken Blanchard Companies.

Our company went to “unlimited PTO” about 16 months ago. The idea was to try it out for a year and re-evaluate. The re-evaluation period was moved to the 18-month mark, so it hasn’t happened yet.

You would think the problem would be people abusing the policy but I have the opposite one: my people are not taking any vacation. Back in the day when we had a “use or lose it” policy, I had to stay on people’s cases to take their PTO and they would, but now that time off is at the employee’s discretion, I can’t get people to take their vacation.

I have a team of nine folks and every single one of them seems to feel worried about taking reasonable time off. I am worried that people are going to burn out. Can I make my people take time off? What to do? I feel like I need to call a…

In Western cultures at least, it would seem that giving people the option to manage their own workload, get their jobs done in the agreed upon timeframe, and take care of their personal lives with flexibility could only be a good thing. Such an approach treats people like responsible, sensible adults. But in some organizations many people are burdened with unreasonable workloads. Some employees are poor judges of how long certain tasks will take, so they take on too much. Other employees burden themselves by taking on more than they should. The very ambitious sometimes seek to assure their promotability by simply outworking their peers. It is up to the manager to figure this out and gauge the proper workload for each person.

In certain sectors people are going to be more affected by high performance pressure than others, making it feel unsafe for people to take time off.

People avoid taking time off for many reasons: For example, they:

Feel they are indispensable and believe nobody else can do the job they do.

Worry their customers will be upset by their absence.

Succumb to FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out)—they don’t want to miss getting in on an exciting project.

Fear being judged—they don’t want to be seen as a slacker.

Bank their hours for a “rainy day”—rather than taking a big vacation, they save their hours in case an unexpected illness or emergency requires them to be out of the office

You, as the manager, need to discuss PTO with every person you lead. Each individual is going to have a different concern and you can work with them to alleviate those concerns. You can also work as a team to assure that plans are made in advance and people are properly covered during their time off.

The benefit of the unlimited PTO policy is that it provides people with flexibility in their work day to attend to family or other personal matters without having to submit paperwork. The danger is that people won’t take the time they need to rest, play, and get a change of scenery—activities that research shows are critical to mental and physical health.

You are the leader of your group. Make it clear to your people that you expect them to take vacation time, rest time, time to go to doctors’ appointments, and other kinds of self-care. Show them you mean it by doing these things yourself. Have you planned your own vacation?

Love,

Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!

]]>https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/07/people-arent-using-their-paid-time-off-ask-madeleine/feed/011335Leadership Lessons from Sir Paul McCartneyhttps://leaderchat.org/2018/07/03/leadership-lessons-from-sir-paul-mccartney/
https://leaderchat.org/2018/07/03/leadership-lessons-from-sir-paul-mccartney/#commentsTue, 03 Jul 2018 10:45:33 +0000https://leaderchat.org/?p=11320I am one of the millions of people who has recently enjoyed a 24-minute video escape into happiness—also known as Paul McCartney Carpool Karaoke.

The video is fun, it is revealing, it is touching, and it stays on your mind for days to come. That’s lovely in and of itself. But besides Penny Lane, the house of Paul’s youth, and the Philharmonic Pub, what did I see?

As a coach for The Ken Blanchard Companies, I couldn’t help but notice that the qualities Paul McCartney revealed in the video are the qualities of truly successful leaders.

Whether with the host James Corden, or with a shopkeeper, Paul was open and connected.

In conversation about his career, he was reflective, humble, kind, and humorous.

With strangers, he was patient and generous.

And for his fans worldwide, he continues to be creative and generative.

Paul’s interactions with people were a video illustration of our Blanchard ABCD Trust Model:

Able is about demonstrating competence. Do the leaders know how to get the job done? Are they able to produce results? Do they have the skills to make things happen?

Believable means acting with integrity. Leaders have to be honest in their dealings with people. Believability is also about acting in a consistent, values-driven manner that reassures people that they can rely on their leaders.

Connected is about demonstrating care and concern for other people. It means focusing on people and identifying their needs. It is supported by good communication skills. When leaders share a little bit of information about themselves, it creates a sense of connection.

Dependable is about reliability and honoring commitments. This is about leaders being accountable for their actions and being responsive to the needs of others. If they promise something, they must follow through.

Watch the video (again). In addition to the joy, what do you see? For me, it can be summed up as Trustworthiness: A firm and positive belief in Paul McCartney’s ability, integrity, goodness, and reliability. And isn’t that what we want to see when we look around—and up?

About the Author

Mary Ellen Sailer, Ed.D., is a Coaching Solutions Partner with The Ken Blanchard Companies’ Coaching Services team. Since 2000, Blanchard’s 120 coaches have worked with over 15,000 individuals in more than 250 companies throughout the world. Learn more at Blanchard Coaching Services.

I work for a great manager at a nonprofit. My manager is wildly committed, super passionate, and really seems to care about his employees. I have reported to him for seven years, during which time I have gone from being known as a green kid right out of college to an old hand who knows how to get things done around here.

My problem is that my manager is terrible at hiring. Terrible. He keeps hiring people that were vetoed by everyone else on the team. He falls in love with candidates for obscure reasons, such as he likes their foreign accent or their backpack (true story—it was covered with travel stickers showing third world countries the guy had worked in, which is relevant to our mission, but still).

Our last three hires have been disasters, and I saw it coming each time. All three were gone quickly but our team is tired of the time and energy it takes to onboard these people as well as the disruption to our day-to-day work.

I have been researching different hiring practices and I think I could add a lot of value by making our process more effective so we make better hires. How do I go to my manager and offer my help without him getting defensive or seeing it as insubordination?

Only Want to Help

Dear Only Want to Help,

I can only assume your organization doesn’t have a competent HR person to support hiring—if it doesn’t, you do seem to be on your own. Hiring is so often treated as an afterthought and not considered to be as critical as it is. The best employees are the people with the right experience, the right skills, a solid fit with the values of the organization, and a love of work. The best employees are almost always good hires to begin with. There are a lot of ways to assess potential candidates and thereby raise the quality of new hires.

If you do, in fact, have someone in HR, you may want to start there so you aren’t stepping on any toes.

Either way, I think it is fair to say that you should talk to your boss. You have worked together for too long not to be honest about the toll the errors are taking and how you might be able to add value. I am laughing a little because all of my regular readers know exactly what I am going to say: talk to your manager and ask for permission to offer some thoughts.

The good news is that the mistakes were rectified quickly. The only worse thing than a bad hire is not recognizing it and fixing it fast. The best way to avoid big mistakes, other than hiring well, is to impose a three- to six-month probationary period before going to a full employment contract. You’d think people would be on their best behavior for the required time period, but my experience is that people are pretty much are themselves from the outset.

Even so, the cost of a wrong hire is high. So, as you prepare to talk to your manager, consider how he prefers to process information. He might respond well to a narrative—the emotional decision based on a backpack might be a clue. You describe him as super passionate and caring, so possibly an approach based on appealing to his emotions may be the way to go. Or perhaps if he is an analytical thinker and uses data (just not when hiring!) he will be persuaded by facts and figures. If he seems to be a systems thinker, you can go at the problem using information about how each system in the organization is affected by the disruption and how much more smoothly things would go with proper hiring decision making protocols in place.

Listen to your manager’s speech—the way he talks will be your tipoff. Use language he tends to use and thought patterns that will feel familiar to him. Ask for permission to share your thoughts and be ready with a brief, condensed version of your argument and your approach. Start with the big picture and the headlines and get him interested. Once he is interested, you can go ahead with your detailed outline. You can be ready with a presentation to give right in the meeting or to send to him afterward.

Your use of the word insubordination was a bit of a surprise, as there is less hierarchy these days than ever before. Perhaps your boss has strong control needs? If so, three bad hires in a row must really hurt. I think the only thing that would be insubordinate would be doing something behind his back or gossiping about his lack of competence in hiring. Trying to add value by doing research and making recommendations based on accepted best practices seems reasonable to me. Show respect and be polite and kind. Pay close attention to how what you are saying is being received and stay attuned to when you should stop and try again later. You should be okay. Your heart is in the right place.

Love, Madeleine

About the author

Madeleine Homan Blanchard is a master certified coach, author, speaker, and cofounder of Blanchard Coaching Services. Madeleine’s Advice for the Well Intentioned Manager is a regular Saturday feature for a very select group: well intentioned managers. Leadership is hard—and the more you care, the harder it gets. Join us here each week for insight, resources, and conversation.

Got a question for Madeleine? Email Madeleine and look for your response here next week!