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Monthly Archives: June 2014

As I am typing this, I am chewing on a kit kat…my ultimate weakness. What made me get it? I decided to go and buy milk for the office and some bananas for me to have before heading to the gym.

As I was in the store, I could not help myself, but grab a kit kat and go straight to the till. Am I enjoying the kit kat?? No I’m not. I did not even want it, I bought it purely because of habit. At around this time is when I used to get up and get myself a kit kat…so I went to the shop at a time when I’m most vulnerable.

Lesson from this experience? Keep your bum on your chair between 2pm and 4pm…no matter what!!!

I’ve come to the realisation that I have two vices in life…OVER-EATING and OVER-SPENDING. The food part I’ve been aware of for many years. However, the spending is something I realised I have a big problem with at the weekend.

I’m always broke, but I’d always thought that was because I was bad with money. But I’m not bad with money, I’m bad with wanting to spend it all. Within 2 or 3 days of getting paid, I’ll be on the broke side of the spectrum.

Now, I have come to the realisation that I am addicted to spending. I will swipe my card like there is no tomorrow buying things like food and drinks (See why I’m so overweight???). I rarely have something physical to show for my spending. There are all kinds of things that I need, new bedding, new pots, new curtains…and I always have intentions of buying these things.

My budget usually looks quite healthy, and because of this, I feel ”rich” and find myself swiping more than intended. Every month I tell myself, this time it’s going to be different…but that is almost never the case.

Anyway, hopefully because I have recognised this very real problem, I will start researching on how NOT TO SPEND. I still have a bit of money left…mainly because I did not put anything into savings, and a couple of my friends owe me a bit of money.

But, I am hoping I survive this month, and avoid avoid avoid spending a lot of money of food I shouldn’t be having to begin with.

Maybe I should create a spending diary to see if I can curb and keep track of my spending…yeah?

it’s almost lunch time, and I am sitting here wondering if I should go to the gym. There was a time, about a month ago, when this was an automatic YES! but, the new gym membership, can’t wait to be fit and skinny phase has worn off.

It’s not that I don’t want to go to the gym. It’s just that I’ve been ”busy” you know. And my efforts at the gym haven’t given me the results I was hoping for….but that was my fault…I was eating too much.

Now I’m not eating as much…and because I’m not eating as much, I feel I don’t ”need” to go to the gym…but I need to go to the gym to drop the pounds (See my dilema?)

And then today, I left the house with no intentions of going to the gym, because I am sitting and waiting for a phone call to see if I have been approved to buy a new laptop….They haven’t called yet…If I go to the gym, I’ll miss the call….right?

Or maybe I could carry my phone around with me as i get my gyming done?

So, does one go to the gym and risk missing the call? I mean, I could go and get some strength training done…lift a few weights?

Nah, I’ve made up my mind. I’m not going to the gym. I’ll go tomorrow. Or I’ll go for a run after work 🙂

So, almost everyday for the last few weeks i’ve been having a kit kat in the afternoon. Purely because it’s what I have been craving…not because I am hungry, or deserve a treat because I’ve been a good girl, purely because my tongue whats to be satisfied by the smooth white chocolate and crunchy wafer combination.

This craving develops between 2pm and 4pm, without fail. I’m craving it right now, but I have not gone to buy it because my tummy feels stuffed (just had a cup of chai tea…yum!).

In the past, a stuffed tummy has not stopped me from going to get some chocolate. I genuinely want to ”take a walk” and get some right now. But, instead, I am sitting here writing about how much I want it.

This is the therapy I have chosen for when I have a craving for junk food. I believe this is going to work out for me, at least for now. Right now, I’ve managed to survive the 2pm – 4pm danger-zone, and I can look forward to enjoying a lovely dinner at home this evening 🙂

Right, I’ve just arrived at work and I’m having a very healthy cup of herbal tea. However, I did not have breakfast before I left the house…(I almost never eat before leaving the house). So, I am sitting here deciding if I want a big blueberry muffin with.

I had one yesterday…and based on what I read, if you start off with bad food, you will eat badly throughout the day. However, this was not the case yesterday. I had my delicious and fresh bluberry muffin in the morning, went to the gym, did a fantastic 30 minute work-out, had a steak and kidney pie for lunch and managed to stave off my mid-afternoon chocolate craving by having a naartjie instead. For supper I had tandoori chicken and a small portion of chips. How many calories all this was? I’m not sure…maybe about 1700??

Anyway, I’m trying to justify getting up and going to get a blueberry muffin for my ‘breakfast’. Surely its not thaaaat bad a meal. Definitely better than the triple chocolate doughnuts I used to have everyday. Right?

Right. Let’s start off by saying, I’m rather overweight, borderline obese, and have been trying….boy have I been trying!!!…to get my weight down and live a healthier lifestyle. Despite my overweight-ness, I am actually quite conscious of what I eat. In fact, I kinda obsess about it. Which means when I eat something bad (which is often) it’ll haunt me for many hours.

So, the purpose of this blog is to write about my ‘feeeeelings’ whenever I crave my usual mid-afternoon chocolate or whole big packet of chips. Hopefully it will help, because nothing else has.