Thursday, March 12, 2015

Criminal Elements Engaging in Propaganda - ISB to Investigate

ARKANIS SYSTEM - A criminal propaganda holovid has emerged on the HoloNet engaged in spreading vile lies about the Empire and even Lord Darth Vader. The Imperial Security Bureau (ISB) has been tasked by the COMPNOR Sector Office on Arkanis proper to investigate this speech crime.

The HoloVid is titled 'Beyond the Dune Sea', and is supposedly depicting a scene on the crime-infested planet of Tatooine. COMPNOR agents warn loyal citizens not to watch this video without being prepared to see some gruesome sights that are intended to shake their faith in the Empire.

According to ISB agents who have watched this holovid (so you, loyal citizens of the Empire do not have to), the propaganda piece engages in the slander that one of the greatest heroes of the Empire - Lord Darth Vader - is "evil". Further, the video depicts Imperial Stormtroopers as incapable of dealing with a common ruffian of the Outer Rim, suggesting that the Empire's finest troops somehow do not have the capacity to shoot straight.

"This is disgusting beyond belief," COMPNOR agent Prop Agandist told HNN. "Calling Darth Vader - someone who put his life and limb on the line for the Empire, having been wounded in the Empire's service - 'evil' is just... I don't have words for it. It just goes to show how depraved these people are."

Agent Agandist told loyal Imperial citizens that it would be best that they not burden their hearts with such visual filth.

"Don't give the creators of these lies the satisfaction," he said. "Let the ISB deal with these people appropriately."

"And I assure you that when we track down these filthmongers, they will see that Stormtroopers are not the bumbling depicted in this footage."