Category: Fitness

I started doing Zombie’s, Run! again. Why? Because I’m shockingly out of shape.
I imagine myself running from a shambling heard across a vacant parking lot or field. The distance increases and I start to feel triumphant. Eventually, and by that I mean like 30 seconds, I start to tire and slow. They don’t.
I realized that even the Romero-esque slow-but-steady zombies would eventually over take me. If there’s nowhere to hide and it’s just a matter of endurance, I’m fucked.
Last week I started my diet and exercise routine. My plan is to run every other day and alternate excuses motivating forces.Six to Start, the creators of Zombies, Run! also make a 5k (a little over 3 miles) training app. This app has is great for people who like to set goals and alternate their running routine because running is boring.Zombies, Run! 5k Training is a fantastic addition to the Zombies, Run! program because the characters and the universe overlap without anything but the first chapter of the story repeating. I was super concerned I’d be doing the same story with different prompts. It was surprisingly hard to find out that they’re different.
In the Zombies, Run! 5k Trainingprogram you’re still Runner 5 but you’re not running on a mission, you’re training to get faster because Able Township not only needs you, it needs you at your best.
I like to run inside on my treadmill because I’m an indoor kid and no one can see me. Unfortunately, when the trainer wants me to run for 15 seconds, I have a bit of a clumsy transition as it takes my treadmill about 30 seconds to get up to speed… I manage.
While I really enjoy both Zombies, Run! and Zombies, Run! 5k Training, I found there’s one major difference between the app I have on my iPod and the app I have on my Galaxy S3: The accelerometer doesn’t seem to know I’m moving… I don’t know if that’s an issue with my S3 or an issue with the app. I’ll keep trying. [1. Fortunately, I’m on a treadmill so I can track my stats manually.]
Both programs link to Six to Start’s ZombieLink web situation where you can share stats (if your app decides to track them) and running routes and progress.
I realize $7.99 is a lot of money for app, but Zombie’s Run! is not just an app. It’s an audiobook, a choose your own adventure, a personal trainer, a progress monitor, and a game. If you want to get fit and be the star of a zombie apocalypse mystery movie, get the app. And if you want a bit of extra motivation and a change of pace, get the Zombies, Run! 5k Training app too.

Staying active is the only way to practice the need to fight or flee at any moment. Down time sounds fantastic on paper but too much can be the death of you and your ability to survive any situation.

Could you easily climb to the 20th floor of a building in a hurry?

Could you walk 20 miles in a day? Run five miles with a pack on your back?

Could you wake up in the middle of the night and sprint through the woods or ruins of s city?

Personally, I can barely make it up 12 steps in my own home without a whinge and a rest. Not a good sign.
Sitting one the couch reading books will not prepare you for the post-apocalyptic survival. Knowing piles of things with out doing them will not prepare you.
It’s hard to stay active when it’s a choice but making it a challenge might make it easier.

Some challenges to help you stay active:

1. Zombies, Run! – This is an interactive story where you’re the main character, Runner 5. You’re coached and guided by the communications expert at a survival camp to run all over the English countryside. You’re the hero and more items you collect the more you can build up your camp.
Missions can be a half hour or an hour, between checkpoints you listen to a playlist you load into the app, your progress is tracked as a runner and the more you run, the swankier you base will get.
2. About.com’s 30-day Fitness Challenge – This one’s for people who need constant prodding. You’re signing up for a 30-day newsletter, each day brings a new challenge– all you have to do is read your email.
3. 100 push-up & 200 sit-ups– This is a great challenge for those who want to prove their dedication to themselves. Over a six-week period you build up the strength until you can do 100 push-ups or 200 sit-up non-stop.
If you do the initial test, you might be shocked to find how flimsy you actually are.

Staying active is a choice.

Choose not only to get that heart healthy 30 minutes of activity a day but also build yourself up and make staying active a part of who you are so when everything else is torn away you can be confident that you’ll still be standing strong, running fast, and generally not dying a heinous death at the hands of robot-alien-zombies.

This isn’t about how I saw some obese person in the mall and thought to myself, “I’d never want a fat person in my apocalypse party because they’ll ruin everything.
No, this is about me being a chunk monster and realizing that I’m at a huge disadvantage and might want to either do something about it or look it in the eye and acknowledge it while planning my survival.Jamie, Anninyn and Char have talked about getting fit for the apocalypse by running, walking and learning to fight. I talk about social manipulation and staying pretty…
It’s not that I don’t value physical fitness; it’s that I’m really bad at it.
That’s the saying after all: Write what you know.
I know about being chubby and weird and kind of good looking if I put some work in.
The problem is being fat, unlike being Black or a woman or Gay or ugly, is a very real disadvantage in an apocalypse. Not only because you’ll be less physically fit than your fellow survivors but also because everything about survival becomes infinitely harder.

Regular readers will know Jamie, as he’s one of our most prolific commenters. Based on that, I assumed he had enough time to send us a guest post on Training for the Zombie Apocalypse… and he did!The zombie survival workout – 4 workouts you need to not get eaten
The Buddhists say that your body is a temple. The Buddhists are liars. Your body is no more holy than my browser history is free of questionable Google searches. Don’t listen to them. Your body isn’t a temple.
Your body is a weapon.
And when the proverbial world fan is spinning the proverbial shit everywhere, you’re going to need your weapon in tip top shape. Don’t bring a butter knife to a gang war and don’t bring an overweight, wheezing sack of meat to a zombie apocalypse. Here’s how you fine tune that body of yours, from head to toe, against the oncoming hordes.Rule #1 – Cardio
Yes, Zombieland rules apply here. Fatties do indeed die first. Before you even think about slaying zombies en masse, you’re going to need to be able to outrun them. Not only that, but you’re going to be doing a lot of walking across the desolate, post-apocalyptic landscape, so you need to be damn sure that your stamina is as high as possible.
So what do you train for; distance or speed? Surely it’s better to outpace zombies for the first few hundred metres and then slow down once they give up chasing you. That’s a good point, except for one thing. Zombies don’t give up. They don’t get tired. You will, sooner or later. And that’s when they’ll make you an entree. Always opt for long distance walking and running when you train. If you can, spice it up with hill climbs and interval treadmills work. You’re likely to hit the countryside at some point, and those inclines are tough.
Your general survival completely depends on your ability to outpace the undead all the friggin’ time. Throw in a sprint every now and again during your workout so you can be sure you can rely on that extra burst of speed if a shuffler gets too close for comfort.It’s all in the shoulders
I’ve seen enough zombie movies to know that if you want to properly down a zombie, you need to use blunt force trauma. Unless you’re a master at decapitating bodies in a single stroke, avoid sharp weapons and opt for your sledgehammers, crowbars and cricket bats. Most zombies are the slow, shuffling type, indicating that the only part of their brain that is active is the basal ganglia, the ‘reptilian brain’. That little sucker is buried deep inside the brain tissue so you’re going to need a lot of force in order to cave in the skull and keep a zombie down for good.
Strength training for using these big, blunt weapons needs a lot of work on your back and shoulders. If you think that biceps are the way to go, think again. What are you, applying for Mr. Universe? The force of your swing and the strength you put into it comes from the shoulders, so make that a priority when strength training. Pushups and overhead presses will give you the strength you need to swing a bat with enough force.Tighten the core
If you’re anything like me, the weekend pizza and beer sessions have left you with a slight paunch, making you more than a little front heavy. If you need to make a quick getaway or are knee deep in flesh-hungry undead, this will give you some disadvantages, the biggest of which is you dying a hell of a lot quicker.
Get shot of that beer gut as soon as possible and tighten up your core – your abdomen and back muscles near your spine. Every athlete knows this is one of the most important sets of muscles to train, as once you sort that out the rest of the body starts to fall into place. Sit ups and squats are your best friend in building up your core muscles and losing that belly.State of mind
Even though blunt objects should be your weapon of choice, the one thing that you need to keep sharp is your mind. Complacency leads to stagnation, which leads to you getting eaten. The last thing you want is for stress to get the better of you and for you to freeze up mid swing, leaving you open for attack. Throughout your workout, add in some stretches, yoga and meditation to keep your mind focused and clear. Your brain is the biggest advantage you have against zombies (hence why they find it so damn delicious) so use it.
Jamie Gibbs is the overweight, wheezing sack of meat that is doing his best to get into shape before the zombie apocalypse finally hits. You can find him on his fantasy blog Mithril Wisdom by day, and brooding over the city rooftops at night (that last bit might not be entirely true).

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know by now I’m into apocalypse training. Most people would call it a fitness regime, but for me it is most definitely about not being too fat, too slow, too weak to survive.
To that end, I have made a decision. At least once a week, every week, I am going on an Apocalypse Walk to get myself ready- and I want YOU to join me.
Yes, you.
What makes the Apocalypse Walk different from normal walking?Continue reading “The Apocalypse Walk”

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know by now I’m into apocalypse training. Most people would call it a fitness regime, but for me it is most definitely about not being too fat, too slow, too weak to survive.
To that end, I have made a decision. At least once a week, every week, I am going on an Apocalypse Walk to get myself ready- and I want YOU to join me.
Yes, you.
What makes the Apocalypse Walk different from normal walking?Continue reading “The Apocalypse Walk”

Part game, part fitness training, Zombies, Run! is the absolute BEST way I’ve seen to get yourself zombie fit. And it also may be the thing that finally makes me buy an android or an iPhone (that I can’t afford), so I hope the maker is fucking happy.
Effectively, Zombies, Run! is an audio game for iPhone, iPod touch and Android. In it, you choose your own music list, choose a route, and the game does the rest. In it, You’re Runner 5. Hundreds of lives are counting on you. You’ve got to help your base rebuild from the ruins of civilization by collecting critical supplies while avoiding roving zombie hordes. Can you save them and learn the truth about the zombie apocalypse?
Not only that, but it has strategy and RPG elements. As you run, you collect essential items- med kits, ammo, etc- and you have to decide who is more in need. So for completists like me, it’s perfect.
Zombies, Run keeps track of distance, speed, calories burned, etc, so if you’re nerdy and serious about surviving the apocalypse, check it out.

Yesterday I went on a long walk with my husband, practicing for the apocalypse. We packed long-dated, easily eaten things and we hunted-gathered while we were there, picking up freshly fallen hazel nuts and eating them along the way.
The problem came on the way home. I was so exhausted my eyes were closing of their on accord. I could barely walk, although home was only 40 minutes away.
So we ruined the whole thing and stopped off for a pub lunch.
But there will be no pub lunches after the apocalypse. Pub lunches will not exist. So what can a lazy girl like me do?Continue reading “Exhaustion- the whiny killer.”

Recently I spent a good proportion of a day in a dark, smoky room, confused by loud noise while other people snuck around and tried to shoot me. What on earth was I doing? I was playing Quasar with some friends, and it struck me that this was remarkably good practice for the end times. Hear me out. It sounds weird, but in a country where guns and assault courses are only really available for the military or over-priced stag weekends, what better? And that made me think about other nerdy or weird pursuits and how they may help with your survival choices.Continue reading “How nerdy pursuits could save your life.”