15th of December

Some things you just wish you didn’t ever have to go thru and Chemotherapy is certainly one of them.

But you don’t have a choice if you’re faced with cancer. Well, you do have a choice not to go thru chemo but more than likely it will end in death. Of course, there’s no guarantee even with chemotherapy but the odds are better. But generally, with today’s amazing drugs the odds are pretty good.

so,

Your world gets smaller. You really just don’t go out as much. Partly because you feel lousy but also you want to avoid crowds, germs etc. I remember sitting in the car while my husband would go into the store for a few things and I would look around at all the people coming an going and thought, “wow”, “it’s all so ‘normal’ for them.”

You realize that most things aren’t that important. So you ran out of eggs, figure out something else to eat then. Oatmeal? Just an example.

Time slows down and you just drift from appointment to appointment. Time definitely was different. I didn’t keep a schedule as such and it wasn’t till I found FlyLady that I started my routines.

Normal things become a big deal, like taking a shower, or getting out of bed. It wasn’t till a year and a half after my SCT, that I realized, I wanted to be normal again. I am forever grateful to A.L that hired me as a Library helper and equally profoundly saddened that S. S., ended that 8 years later by not stepping up to the plate to library administration. But life moves on.

Your relationship to food, money, life, shifts and you realize life is just a fleeting moment and You learn to live in the Present. Even after being a meditator for 35 years, living in the moment with cancer taught me more, than all those years combined. You just had to be in the moment no matter how you felt.

It’s a strange place to be but then life moves on and you get back into the rhythm of it all when you hit that wonderful moment of remission or for some people and actual cure.

I've been married for nearly 15 years to a wonderful husband and I'm a mom to three great kids ages 12, 11 and 9. Oh, and I just happen to have cancer. Multiple Myeloma is a cancer of the blood that is currently incurable but IS considered highly treatable! My goal is to make people laugh, cry or feel a little less alone whether you are a mom, cancer patient or BOTH!