Dan Roodt: On two ex-spies’ tirade against ‘the white Afrikaner’

It has been at least a month since I visited that cauldron of leftist platitudes, The Daily Maverick. Talking of platitudes, the other day I discovered HL Mencken’s definition which everyone in this country should memorise as it is singularly apposite in this colonial society that is slowly slouching towards its Zimbabwe:

“Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true.”

So this afternoon I decided it was time to boost my ego again by confirming just how stupid our PC brethren – although maybe we don’t belong to the same species at all, so we are hardly brothers – could be.

And sure enough after reading Ranjeni Munusamy’s nebulous threat of the revolution, “transformation” and “radical economic change to come” (kind of Marx and Engels’s historical inevitability for Malema’s woodwork class), lo and behold, the latest anglocentric tirade against us, the much-maligned “white Afrikaner” by Nel Marais and Jo Davies:

“Apartheid” in any of its senses is such a dead horse, especially while your marvellous system is flooding our dams and rivers with e. coli, farmers get tortured, babies get raped – you all know about the psychopathic, sadistic “substructure” of this so-called “democracy”, it’s more of a demonocracy – yet you keep flogging it!

Take note: your propaganda victory of 1976 or 1989 or whenever you felt the surge of testosterone and cried, “Aha, now we’ve got the hated Boers where we want them!”, is fast receding into memory. It’s like the Battle of Majuba for us, a magnificent victory and every year on 27 February a thousand Afrikaners climb the mountain to see where we beat the hell out of Britain’s finest soldiers in 1881, but it does nothing for our plight in the present.

Every dire right-wing prophecy by Eugene Terre’Blanche or Jaap Marais of the HNP – who knew a lot more than FW de Klerk’s whole cabinet put together – has come to pass! South Africa is a few inches – note the “imperial measurements” to gladden your English hearts – away from becoming another Liberia or Sierra Leone. Anarchy on steroids. Gentlemen in drag or in bridal gowns or naked with AK47s who are out to make war against the civilians, the elderly, the children, the weak and, of course, to rape the women. Despite everything that Africa Check and other PC, foreign-funded NGOs may say, South Africa is indeed “the rape capital of the world”.

Blaming the devil or the moon or apartheid will not help you one bit. You have made your bed and now you must lie in it. You wanted to place these people, many of whom couldn’t do a simple interest-rate calculation without a calculator, in charge, their greedy hands on every lever of power. Now they are robbing us blind and turning our once beautiful country into a human and ecological disaster, but guess what: It is your fault, not ours! You crazy left-wing, Marxist, feminist, anti-white, “progressive” mobs and “collectives” – how you love that word and its herd-like warmth – wanted all of this to happen. You placed bombs on our streets and in Wimpy bars in your fanatical thirst for revolution, transformation, radical change… Google “chimpanzee with AK-47” and you might find the YouTube video where a chimpanzee shows that he can also handle an AK-47 and hold it aloft as a victory sign, in the “African way”. Well, actually, I’ll save you the trouble:

That is more or less the content of your revolution and your much-vaunted “struggle” which, without Swedish money and East German intelligence, would never have happened.

This country is broken and like Humpty Dumpty, it will never be put together again. More people have been murdered and raped, more money and more goods stolen or defrauded over the last 20 years, than in the previous three centuries, since the arrival of Jan van Riebeeck in his three little ships!

Rolene Strauss

These two ex-spooks writing on The Daily Maverick are just making fools of themselves. They are trying to live up to a stereotype of what they imagine a British leftist would recognise as “the Afrikaner”. The reality, of course, is far more complex and an Afrikaner could be anyone from a farmer in shorts, two-tone shirt and velskoens to a derivatives dealer in New York or a lawyer or the current Miss World, Rolene Strauss. We are a quarrelling, disparate bunch but we share a common, highly standardised language spoken from the Limpopo to Cape Agulhas, not to forget Windhoek, as well as a love of the braai, biltong, melktert, Die Stem and politically incorrect singers such as Steve Hofmeyr and Bok van Blerk. Let’s leave rugby out of it and the sooner they transform the Springbok rugby team into the “All Blacks”, the better. Sport and alcohol have been our downfall and usually the two go together.

Quoting a few poems in a tendential way does not make up for the inability to think, I am afraid. The theory of “white privilege” is just a theory and no-one in this country has even bothered to write a book about it, unlike in the USA where they agonise much more over these things than we do.

The first contradiction you should try to deal with is the fact that, culturally and otherwise, we do not exist in this so-called “New South Africa”, your politically correct “Little England” where everybody tries very hard to emulate some lost British model (see my recent little essay: Raiders of the lost Empire: South Africa’s ‘English’ identity), replete with a stiff upper lip and cucumber sandwiches at the club. We have been completely marginalised, which was part of the grand plan concocted by De Klerk and his British masters, so it follows that:

It does not matter what we believe, what we do or what we talk about, as it is of no consequence to the inner workings of the ANC, what Malema will say next, Robert Mugabe’s next state visit, Eskom’s load-shedding schedule or any of the issues that are really important.

We have absolutely no influence over the fate of South Africa, hurtling towards a desired status as “just another African country” with attendant needs and ills such as food aid, IMF bailouts, peace-keeping and foreign doctors. Neither do our dead ancestors and their past political policies exercise any residual effects on today’s merry mayhem and “progressive” slide into Africanist utopia, which we would call “dystopia” as you couldn’t drink the tap water and you would have to carry a gun to go shopping.

You do not have to worry about “nothing changing”. It will definitely change – for the worse, and soon. We won’t enjoy it, but you will, as you revert to some Cuban or Maoist dream of riding around on antique bicycles past gigantic posters exhorting you to greater equality, as well as a few prison camps dotted around the countryside to hold it all together.

But we’ve also got plans, lots of them. In our future there is some little Luxemburg, a tiny corner of the country with an ocean view, full of banks and high-tech firms, symphony orchestras and opera companies belonging to a kunsteraad and lots more Afrikaans poetry, velskoens and shorts, Die Stem and other stuff you won’t like. But guess what, you will be so busy with your panoply of problems, internecine power struggles, civil wars between locals and xenos, as well as keeping the aid money flowing, that you won’t even notice. And most of these imperial, British leftists and their pseudo-Afrikaans emulators such as Nel Marais and Jo Davies won’t be here anymore, having packed for Perth or Toronto.