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It’s true and if you can’t accept it, I can’t help you other than to offer you proof. Pittsburgh is chock full of “okay looking” people and has a larger ratio of ugly people than most cities. There’s no such thing you say? Please. Ask the PRA okay? The great majority of people that live in this city were born here. Way more people leave this city than come in. So years and years of Pittsburghers marrying Pittsburghers and giving birth to little Pittsburghers seems to have resulted in mostly below-average looking Pittsburghers.

I ride the bus (you’re welcome, commuteinfo.org). It picks me up and then circles the perimeter of the city (Grant, Forbes, Liberty, Busway). The bus is boring so I’ve come up with a game and I challenge ANY SINGLE PITTSBURGHER to try this and tell me I’m wrong. See all those people walking the sidewalks or waiting for the various busses? I want you to count how many truly beautiful people you see (as in, you’d do ’em). Put your homophobia aside and look at both sexes okay? I will say that for every time you play this game, you will find if you are lucky, one person of each sex EVERY OTHER DAY that you consider attractive. And I’m really reaching here because lots of times (and yes, I’ve lowered my standards) I can’t find a single attractive soul.

Look, it is the land of Myron Cope, Bill Hilgrove, the Steigerwalds, the Rooneys. Would YOU do those guys?

You know, I’ve only lived here for about a month, but I’ve noticed the same damn thing–not a lot of attractive people here. Also, lots of people look related to me; if you were going to describe the average product of the Pittsburgh gene pool, it seems that said product is sort of boxy/square-shaped, with tortoise-like facial features. Also, am I crazy, or do they seem to have abnormally big heads and no/small necks?

barristerjubril, you are really really close to being named the “commentator” of the week. I guffawed. I never guffaw. And if you’ve only lived here a month, you are likely now realizing you may need to lower your standards if you are single. Hey though, don’t worry, I’m on the freakin’ hunt to find the hottest “burghers” (see Matt Lamanna) and I’ve got a hot female burgher coming up this week.

Glad I could make you guffaw. While we’re at it–what the hell is up with Pittsburghers and the damn ‘to be’ verb? Are they aware it exists? I swear, the next time the administrative assistant at my office talks about files that ‘needs put away’, I’m gonna lose it. Which is why I called in sick today. But that’s another story.