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Situated in University Hall’s Old Wing Dining room, Capture Collective’s debut exhibition, Ours, brought together selected artworks from the hall’s collection. Since the hall opened to students in 1896, a wide-ranging collection has been built up from the gifts of friends and alumni, as well as from the Beverage Bequest, a memorial fund left to the hall in 1962 by one of its earliest women graduates. Under the direction of former warden, Lorna Walker, the fund was, and still is, used for the purchase of artworks every few years.

Along the entire way to the University of Arkansas I’ve got The Count of Monte Cristo playing at 1.25x speed. 47 hours of material, of which, by the time I’m pulling out of my driveway, I have 17 hours left. 5.5 hours of driving projected by Maps and the car’s a-rumble with the sonority of John Lee’s narration. Ma foi, I could listen to him say French words all day.

Hosted by Sanskriti, the University’s South Asian society, Bindi promised a night of music, drinks and dancing, and it certainly did not disappoint. Starting as they meant to go on, guests flocked to the dance floor the moment the DJ began his set. The music was an eclectic mix of Bollywood and Bhangra, creating an upbeat and lively vibe that ensured it was the standout feature of the night. The committee had even sourced a dholi for the occasion, a traditional Punjabi drummer. This added another dimension to the music, and really brought the party to life. Trust me when I say it’s impossible not to dance along to the rhythm of a dhol.

When I came to Freshers, I wasn’t quite sure what academic parents were, but I knew I didn’t want to be an orphan. The good news – parents want kids as much as you want to be adopted. An academic parent is usually a 3rd year that ‘adopts’ a group of first years during Freshers. Many people have a mom and a dad but some will end up will a few moms and dads – I have 2 wonderful dads! One of many reasons to get involved in hall and evening activities during Freshers is it gives you the perfect opportunity to meet a parent. I was adopted in the Vic and I know others who were adopted while moving into halls and at various first week hall events. After you are adopted once, it’s not uncommon to have your new mom or dad introduce you to your other parent. Just get chatting: either you or your future parent can pop the question.

1. Plastic sheeting, and more plastic sheeting. It covers a multitude of sins – you never know what bodily or alcoholic fluids will seep into your carpet otherwise. Saves a lot of stress at the end of the year when the landlord comes round to inspect.

To experience pure, unconditional love. You’ll smother them with affection (force alcohol down their throats until they throw up) and they’ll willingly reciprocate (puke all over your shoes).

To make sure someone is there to look after you when you are old. By ‘look after’, I mean they’ll be there when you’re in fourth-year, taunting you with their lack of deadlines and ability to strawpedo wine without incurring the hangover from hell.

Because you fancy one of them. After all, freshers are hot. This is an unwritten rule in itself.

To watch them blossom from shy, doe-eyed first years into loud, brash, borderline alcoholics. Don’t miss those all-important ‘firsts’, including first random hook-up and first all-nighter!

To teach them what your mother never taught you. Dr. Noodles is not as good as you think it might be. Never wear your favourite shoes to Kinkell. Tequila is not a pre-drink.