Teen Mom recap: whatever they’re being paid, it’s not worth it

Editor’s note: In a series of guest entries Stephanie Sylverne is recapping MTV’s reality show Teen Mom.

Anyone who believes the Teen Mom girls are being “rewarded” by MTV for being pregnant teens (as if they committed a crime worthy of punishment in the first place) only has to watch the current season to see that isn’t true. In fact, I’m not so sure they’re better off because of this show at all, even financially. Whether they’re making $280,000 a year, $140,000 a year, or $65,000 a year, being thrust into the unrelenting tabloid spotlight is not worth it. They are subject to the amount of stress and public scrutiny typically reserved for either wealthy celebrities or infamous criminals, and they’re neither. Who would want their life exposed in this way for- at very most- $280,000?

I wonder what MTV makes off of Teen Mom. No matter what they’re paying the girls, it’s definitely a fraction of what they deserve for being the subjects of one of the most popular MTV shows of all time. The cast of MTV’s other wildly successful show, Jersey Shore, now makes $100,000 per episode with 13 episodes per season.

Considering the amount of pain the girls (and their families) are going through, I can’t help but feel that these young women are being exploited while MTV reaps the benefits. It really hit me when Farrah went to see her therapist and told her that she doesn’t have anyone to count on and “lately it seems like I don’t have friends and I’m not okay with that.” The therapist says, “You had to grow up fast; you didn’t have a choice.” Wait a minute. Farrah did have friends, way back in her 16 and Pregnant episode and in the early days of Teen Mom. And now that she’s modeling and going to culinary school she would probably make friends there as well, but she’s on this show that paints her as a spoiled brat and she’s in the tabloids every week so it’s no wonder she’s having a hard time relating to people.

I’m not playing any violins for Farrah, whose tone of voice grates on me more and more every week, but let’s just be honest about the situation. The forced “don’t be a teen mom” lessons not-so-subtly smooshed here and there in every episode are not only disingenuous but totally unfair and self-serving for MTV. They aren’t lonely because they’re young mothers. They’re lonely for the same reasons a lot of famous people are- they’re surrounded by people who want them to behave a certain way because it makes money. They aren’t making real connections with genuine people.

On top of loneliness, fame, young motherhood, and her dysfunctional family, Farrah also has to deal with the family of Sophia’s deceased father, Derek. There is a lot of animosity between them, but I don’t know if the precise reasons were ever explained. Regardless, Derek’s mom Stormie apparently blocked Sophia as beneficiary of Derek’s social security benefits by claiming that Derek never acknowledged Sophia (how could he when he passed away before she was born?) yet she is taking Farrah to court for grandparent visitation rights.

Adoption didn’t completely save Tyler and Catelynn from having to deal with aggravating family interference or a constant barrage of insults from the public. Dr. Drew might praise them up and down, but the couple has said that strangers send nasty emails and messages about how Carly will hate them for “giving her away” and that they “took the easy way out” (and those aren’t the meanest ones).

Tyler’s dad Butch never misses an opportunity to remind him that his daughter is being raised by someone else. When Tyler and his older sister Amber picked him up from jail, Butch asked pregnant Amber if their mother was trying to talk her into “putting that one up for adoption.” When Tyler shows him pictures of Carly from their visit, Butch asks him what it’s like not having his child with him. Later he displays his new tattoo- his grandchildren’s names, including Carly. But Tyler is somehow wise and patient beyond his years and calmly reminds his father that he doesn’t have much room to talk about proper parenting. Butch spent a decade of Tyler’s life in prison, so he’s simply projecting his guilt onto his son.

Amber is definitely being hit the hardest by stress (no pun intended!). She is facing assault charges stemming from last season’s altercation with Gary in which she hit him repeatedly in the face. CPS is involved too. Gary tells her she needs to hire a lawyer when the police ask her to come in for questioning but she resists. He says, “Amber you can go to jail for this!” She says, “So you think it’s smarter for me to get a lawyer or do you think it’s smarter for me to go to jail?” and “if a lawyer is more than jail should I just go to jail?” What? No really, what? Then she tells Gary he’s going to have to pay for the attorney because she can’t. (Where’s the $140,000?) Gary tells her to pay for her own lawyer, because he pays the rent and then Amber goes into a “ME!ME!ME!” tirade in which she blames Gary for the entire situation.

Gary and Amber are locked in a textbook abusive relationship. She berates him continually throughout the entire episode. She also reveals her misery, yelling, “I can’t handle it. I can’t handle much of anything right now!” She says, “I’m tired. I’m tired physically, emotionally…” Unfortunately a lot of this behavior is a cry for help. Recently Amber lashed out at the public from her Twitter account (since deleted) and was hospitalized that morning for a suicide attempt. She has since checked into rehab for anger management, so hopefully she finds support there.

Maci is kind of an exception on the show because her family is tame, her relationship with her ex is strained but not overtly hostile (compared to others), and she is well-adjusted and pleasant. Her big issue is that she wants Ryan to meet her new boyfriend Kyle, who just moved in with her. When they finally do, no punches are thrown and no insults are exchanged. In fact they were total gentlemen. Ryan must’ve watched old episodes and realized he looked like a total schmuck ‘cause he’s completely switched up his game this season.

Between the loneliness, nasty public scrutiny, overwhelming stress, lack of privacy, and legal problems, I don’t believe that $140,000 is fair compensation for a full season of the highest-rated program in the age 12-34 demographic. I realize that sounds like a lot of money to the average family, but Bristol Palin made $262,000 as a “teen pregnancy ambassador” for the Candies Foundation and all she had to do was make a couple creepy commercials. Of course the dilemma is- if they’re being paid a lot, are they “realistic”? But is anything on TV realistic? Why hold this to a different standard than any other reality show anymore?