Back and forth about Notre Dame’s fate, Carroll’s future, LOUD SEC fans and a few degrees of SJSU title separation

A long time ago, before Tom Walsh invented football, I used to work at the Los Angeles Times. Janitorial work, mostly, if I remember correctly.

Never been happier and those floors have never been cleaner. Hey, it was the 1930s. Everybody was working hard back then.

Anyway, one of my buddies from the LAT days, Chris Dufresne, is still there, cranking out the best stuff on the national college football scene (tied for No. 1 most influential writer on the beat, of course, with the Merc’s all-knowing Jon Wilmer, the College Hotline Superstar).

Duf is an institution, period, just ask the BCS conference commissioners.

Plus Duf is parked near USC’s five consecutive Pac-10 titles and Wilmer is parked near Stanford’s run of… not.

And to my knowledge he tops Wilmer lately because Wilmer is a force of nature, but hasn’t ever been a guest on Notre Dame Athletic Director Kevin White’s radio show.

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Well, Dufresne has. Just this week, Duf and White were like Howard Stern and Robin Quivers.

When Duf told me that, I knew he had to be my next Back-and-Forth series guest, to spin tales from across the football nation.

Who’s up, who’s going where for the plum coaching jobs, what’s up with San Jose State, Stanford and does Kevin White end his radio conversations with… “Our Rose Bowl dreams… OUT!”?

QUESTION: So you were a guest on Kevin White’s radio show this week, and he asked you what Notre Dame could do to match up better against USC. That’s blog gold! What did you say and what was his response?

DUFRESNE: Well, it was funny, because I mentioned to Kevin that before the USC-ND kickoff that USC honored its seniors and the ceremony lasted about 10 seconds, meaning, um, there weren’t that many seniors and most of these gifted players are coming back next year.

To which Kevin responded, “I noticed that too.”

My basic point was that Notre Dame had the right coach and the right concepts but was still about a step slow and an inch short, mostly on defense, of taking on teams like Ohio State and USC.

QUESTION: What does Notre Dame’s future look like after Brady Quinn and Jeff Samardzjia?

DUFRESNE: Excuse me, haven’t you heard? The future is Clausen. Like the pickles. His name is Jimmy, he plays quarterback, and he’s nothing like his older brothers Rick and Casey because this Clausen is going to play 15 years in the NFL.

‘Course, he hasn’t finished high school yet down here at Oaks Chrisian, where he has teamed with Marc Tyler, Wendell’s son, to stomp opposing competition in precision-like offense destruction.

Clausen committed so early to Notre Dame he had to show ID at South Bend’s front door. He’s the real deal, though, and he’ll start next year as a true freshman.

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QUESTION: Do you often appear on radio shows with the ADs from schools USC tramples?

DUFRESNE: Yes, I’ll be on next week with UCLA’s Dan Guerrero, oops, sorry. Jumped the gun on that one. White is the only AD I know who has a radio show that is not some Wayne’s World hook-up from Aurora, Ill.

Bear Bryant, of course, used to have a weekly coach’s show on Sunday sponsored by Coke and Chesterfield cigarettes, but he was Bear Bryant.

It must have been tough for White taking calls after Michigan 47-21 over ND and USC 44-24 over ND. If he’s smart, he has a really good screener.

QUESTION: Pete Carroll might go the NFL, he might not, and I must
admit I’ve lost a lunch bet with you last year because I thought he’d have gone already. Is it time for him to go to the Cardinals now?

DUFRESNE: Not yet, although no lunch bet this time because we don’t know where this Reggie Bush investigation is going to end up and if that turns ugly it might be the thing that pushes Carroll back to the pros.

Then again, USC is loaded next year and that would be tough not to come back for that.

Listen, he did the pro thing, and I know everyone says he’ll go back some day and finished his unfinished business.

On the other hand, if he stays in college he can become the greatest coach since Walt Harris, I mean, Bear Bryant, who won six national titles and had his paws on about seven others that slipped away, sort of like 41-38 slipped away from Pete last year against Texas.

If I had to bet, though, I say Carroll will get the itch and give it the old pro try. This year? Next year? I don’t know.

QUESTION: If he does go, is there an heir apparent at USC? And is he irreplaceable as a cult figure or is this program built to last?

DUFRESNE: I would think Pete would like to groom one of his assistants, Lane Kiffin, but it might be a tad early because I think Kiffin is only a year older than Jimmy Clausen.

I always thought Jeff Fisher would be the next coach someday, but not sure the timing will be right at Tennessee or whether he’d rather stay in the NFL.

QUESTION: I know you get torrents of e-mail and phone messages every time you write about the BCS order and rules and such… What school’s fans are the loudest and orneriest? Do Florida or Michigan have a legitimate beef about getting knocked out, probably, by USC?

DUFRESNE: The LOUDEST fans are from the SEC because the SEC is THE BEST FOOTBALL CONFERENCE in the nation even though their schools tend to schedule a little soft in nonconference and that always seems to hurt them when it counts.

Two years ago, Auburn went 12-0 but it played Citadel… This year, Florida will stake a claim but has to explain Central Florida, Western Carolina, and a couple of other programs that like big fat pay checks.

Michigan has the bigger beef than Florida if USC loses. Michigan has lost once, on the road, by three points, to the No.1 team.

QUESTION: You’ve got openings at Miami, Alabama, North Carolina State and Arizona State… Just for fun, give me the best candidates for each job.

QUESTION: You know Jeff Tedford fairly well… Should he be poking his head in on any of these?

DUFRESNE: If they’d ever break ground on that Stadium, I think Tedford should stay at Cal, although he has to look at USC and get stomach pains.

But what if Pete Carroll leaves? How dumb would he feel in Coral Cables if he leaves five days before Carroll is introduced as coach of Arizona Bidwills.

QUESTION: I just did my short list of Stanford candidates, should Walt Harris get the boot… What do you think of this job? Is it considered a good one nationally?

DUFRESNE: I think the job is being under-sold. It’s a good job. Tyrone Willingham won there, was a two-time Pac-10 coach of the year, so don’t tell me you can’t put a decent product on the field every three or four years because that’s pretty much the job description.

They excel in all those other sports, why can’t it work in football. Sure you can’t get everyone in, but it’s Stanford, and kids should be lining up to go there in my opinion.

QUESTION: And the biggee: I’m sure there’s a national murmuring about San Jose State’s bowl-berth campaign. Two words: Your thoughts?

DUFRESNE: Well, let’s do the Kevin Bacon degrees of separation thing.

San Jose State came within a blocked kick of beating Boise State, which clobbered Oregon State, which beat USC, which could beat Ohio State and win the national title.

I think if that happens Dick Tomey can buy his team pinky rings and use that old boxing line: We almost beat the team, that beat the team, that beat the team, or something like that.

To think Arizona ran Tomey out and hired John Mackovic. Nice move.

End of back and forth… Well, a little forth left: Many thanks to Senor Dufresne for his wisdom and conversation and someday I really will pay him that lunch I owe.

Also: He loves it when you e-mail him yelling about your school’s divine right to play in the BCS title game. Just LOVES it.