Parent meeting sheds light on gender diversity

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Mimi GellerDr. Todd Savage presented to SPA parents and faculty about his experience in the field of phycology and its relation to gender diversity on Jan. 30 in Driscoll Commons. “Gender, by and large, is a social construction. A group of people, a culture, a society, a nation, decides what it means to be female and to be male. Then they treat that person accordingly. We live in a world that was set up by cisgender people, for cisgender people. We don’t question it,” Savage said.

Definitions as presented by Dr. Todd Savage

Cisgender: Gender identity matches the sex and gender one was assigned at birthTransgender: Gender identity does not match the sex and gender one was assigned at birthGender Diverse: Broader category that captures the range of gender identities

In light of the new Gender Diversity policy that was sent out to families on Jan. 18 by Head of School Bryn Roberts, two parent programs took place these past two days to delve into the topic from both a psychological perspective and a familial stand point. The meeting on Jan. 30 in Driscoll Commons enlightened faculty and parents about gender diversity as a whole, not the specifics of the policy itself.

The “Guidelines for SPA in support of Gender Diversity” was agreed unanimously by the Board of Trustees and had been in the works since this past summer. Extensive effort was carried through by Director of Intercultural Life Karen Dye and Upper School Dean of Students Max Delgado.

Roberts introduced the parent meeting by giving context:

“This meeting is about helping all of you understand the realities of gender diversity and our understandings of it. This new policy will help us serve students better. Our students can’t live up to our mission of ‘shaping the minds and hearts of the people who will change the world’ if they don’t feel understood. Our school must be founded on acceptance. This policy will help our students and it grows directly out of our mission,” Roberts said.

But, gender, by and large, is a social construction. A group of people, a culture, a society, a nation, decides what it means to be female and to be male. Then they treat that person accordingly.”

— Dr. Todd Savage

80% of transgender adults were aware that they were “different” before graduating from elementary school

Less than 4% of transgender people understand they are transgender after turning 18

7.9: The average age of trans-spectrum self-realization

15.5: The average age of learning the ‘words’ to communicate emotions

Suicide Attempt Rate

41% transgender/ gender diverse adults

10-20% lesbian, gay, bisexual identifying people

3-5% of the general population

To begin his presentation, Savage showed parents and faculty a video from the National Center for Transgender Equality. This video humanized the scientific and psychoanalytical information he would deliver next.

“Sex is an assignment made to people by others based on biological data. From there, another assignment is made, and that is the assignment of gender. There is growing research to support that there are probably some biological contributions to gender, or what we know as gender to be. But, gender, by and large, is a social construction. A group of people, a culture, a society, a nation, decides what it means to be female and to be male. Then they treat that person accordingly. We live in a world that was set up by cisgender people, for cisgender people. We don’t question it,” Savage said.

In accordance to an earlier sentiment delivered by Roberts, Savage spoke on the fruition of the new gender diversity policy as it is related to SPA:

“It’s embedded in your mission and your values. Everything that we are talking about tonight is in alignment with that mission and the vision and the values of the school community hold,” Savage said.

Savage continued his presentation by offering overwhelming data and statistics regarding transgender mental health, suicide rates and bullying in schools among other issues.

“

We live in a world that was set up by cisgender people, for cisgender people. . . we don’t question it.”

— Dr. Todd Savage

43% feel unsafe at school

38% avoid gender-specific spaces

66% avoid extra-curricular activities and school events

60% are required to use restrooms/locker rooms based on gender assigned at birth

“It hasn’t necessarily been safe to come out as transgender in our culture. It hasn’t been accepted. And ultimately, it comes down to the perception of how the adults in their lives will react. This is an adult issue. Kids don’t care. If kids do care, it’s because the adults in their lives care. It’s learned behavior,” Savage said.

Savage culminated his presentation by contextualizing gender diversity and the surmounting issues individuals face who identify as being gender diverse. In the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, gender identity is defined as gender dysphoria.

“I truly believe that gender diversity is not and should not be a mental disorder. But, it’s just the state of physcology and psychiatry at the present time,” Savage said.

To give breadth and deeper understanding of the transgender experience from a parent perspective, Leslie Lagerstrom spoke after Savage about her son’s journey as a transgender boy. Her presentation was chronological and detailed, but the mantra was evident: transgenderism is real, it is not a phase, and it can have a happy ending.

The story of Lagerstrom’s son’s transition drew incredible parallels between the data that Savage presented and the lived reality he overcame. Savage emphasized that gender diverse youth remain “consistent, persistent, insistent” about their identity, just as Lagerstrom’s son had been his entire life.