Spoof Expense Account Causes Uproar In Commons

A spoof expense account caused uproar in the house in the early hours of this morning, as Jeremy Bender-Blewett, a Conservative back bencher declared the spoof contents to a somewhat sleepy house.

The document, leaked by a particularly malevolent spoofer of long standing, purported to be a proper claim for expenses by 'Cabinet Minister', Rolly Necksweater. Who doesn't actually exist. Naturally.

Seizing his defining moment with both hands, Bender-Blewett rose, rather smugly to his feet and promptly denounced the Labour Party's expense fiasco before going on to state that 'Cabinet Minister' 'Rolly Necksweater' 'Who really should know better' had claimed for several 'outrageous' items at the humble taxpayer's expense.

"His and hers gold plated crack pipes, a spare wheel for a Lear Jet, six return trips to Dubai, the construction of a bondage dungeon in a Mayfair residence, four cases of absinthe, a Harley Davidson motorcycle, and a twelve month subscription to Loaded magazine."

It was only when he got to the part about claims regarding an unspecified quantity of weapons grade plutonium, lots of opium and fees payable to several dozen Moscow prostitutes that Bender-Blewett eventually smelled a rat.