Maureen had had enough of Tim's obsession. "Football, football, football!"
she moaned, "that's all you ever talk about. It's your whole life. You never
take me out. You never buy me presents. You're either at a match or watching one
on the box. I bet you can't even remember when our wedding anniversary is."

"Yes, I can," her husband retorted, "it's the same date that
Real Madrid beat Manchester United in the Cup-Winners' Cup."