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Apple’s Nemesis Arrived, Right On Schedule

That didn’t take long. One day after Apple introduced yet another iPad Pro model, this one a successor to the 9.7-inch iPad Air, the nattering nabobs of negativism hit the digital streets with a litany of reasons why they won’t buy a new iPad Pro and why you shouldn’t buy one, either.

Somewhere in the bowels of a laboratory in Boulder, CO is an atomic clock, a state of the art timing mechanism that is accurate to within one gazillionth of a second (or somewhere near that). The atomic clock could be used to time with accuracy how soon the doom and gloom and negativity begins after Apple introduces a new product.

Nattering nabobs of negativism? William Safari wrote the phrase, among others, for Richard Nixon’s VP henchman, Spiro Agnew way back in the day. Safire also wrote hopeless, hysterical hypochondriacs of history to describe the negativism that swirled around the U.S. government for its involvement in Vietnam.

As far as I know, neither Safire nor Agnew were Mac users, and not likely Apple customers (the former died just a year or so after the iPhone revolution began, the latter years earlier). There is little question that Safire would have loved to throw a few scathing remarks at those who criticize Apple for fun and profit.

Can you name another technology gadget maker on planet earth that gets the scathing criticism from the digerati elite politburo? With every new Apple product, either revolutionary or incremental, they show up just like clockwork, atomic or ticking, to drag the company over the digital coals with a negative perspective and a low opinion on the company’s latest gadget, only to fade away into the woodwork like the human cockroaches they are.

Let’s back down memory lane for a brief moment.

iPod:

Sounds very revolutionary to me. hey – heres an idea Apple – rather than enter the world of gimmicks and toys, why dont you spend a little more time sorting out your pathetically expensive and crap server line up? or are you really aiming to become a glorified consumer gimmicks firm?

iPhone:

Apparently none of you guys realize how bad of an idea a touch-screen is on a phone. I foresee some pretty obvious and pretty major problems here.

I’ll be keeping my Samsung A707, thanks. It’s smaller, it’s got a protected screen, and it’s got proper buttons. And it’s got all the same features otherwise. (Oh, but it doesn’t run a bloatware OS that was never designed for a phone.)

Color me massively disappointed.

iPad:

It’s basically a gigantic iPod touch; no physical keyboard, heavier than Kindle, needs two hands, it’s not a laptop; not nearly as good for creating stuff…

Watch:

You simply can’t one-hand the Apple Watch…because it’s a tiny screen with a tiny control wheel strapped to your wrist, you have to use both hands to use it, and you have to actually look at it to make sure you’re hitting the right parts of the screen.

MacBook:

Upgrades are impossible… expensive to the point of being hard to recommend… the lightness sometimes makes the notebook hard to steady on your lap…

You get the idea, right? Google is your friend and you’ll a massive number of similar negativity toward almost anything Apple does, yet the company continues to press the envelope and the customer user base exceeds 1-billion earthlings.

Every new Apple product for years has met with the same response. Oohs and aahs. Scathing criticism from members of the technorati elite politburo, often intent on drumming up hits for writing anything negative about Apple, all followed by a growing cadre of customers who love Apple’s latest?

Zealots? Cult? With more than 1-billion active users it would appear that Apple has gone well beyond the niche market and cult status to become a worldwide phenomenon. Just like the nattering nabobs of negativism.