Take that, Kendra Wilkinson. Take that, Bridget Marquardt. And take that, Barbie Benton. It looks like Holly Madison may walk away with a grand prize we thought would never again be awarded -- Hugh Hefner's hand in marriage.

The buzz of the weekend Oscar parties was that Hugh Hefner, 80, will get married again before the end of the year to his No. 1 girlfriend, Holly Madison. "This is very secret, but the word is 'yes,'" one insider told Page Six. "Hef has decided he will marry Holly, and he wants it for his show, 'The Girls Next Door.' Hef thinks business all the time, and looks for a new hook, although he also does really love Holly." Madison is just one of three of the Playboy founder's buxom blond girlfriends featured on the show. "But Hef sees that she is the most dedicated," said our source. "Kendra is never there, and they both hate each other, and Bridget is hanging on by being very friendly to Holly."

Hefner has been married twice before, and separated from his second wife, Kimberley Conrad, in 1998. He has stated that he did not plan to marry again, but Holly has been pushing the issue for a long time (they've been together nearly five years now), and I have a feeling that girl can be fairly persuasive. But, you know, I think Hugh also figures he'll be dead before she hits 30, so what's the harm in marrying her?

Mostly I'm concerned for Kendra Wilkinson, who is adorable but probably functionally retarded. Without Hef around to bankroll her, that girl is totally going to end up in porn. At least Bridget has a masters degree to fall back on. Oh, who am I kidding? She'll end up in porn, too.