Scenario:"Dude, to make them instantly like our company, we just gotta tell them we have the best customer service in town. And, we're nice. Nice people rule! Yay!" Dude, there's a much better way. Try answering this sucka: How do you make Charlie -- who's never heard about your business, never met anyone in your business, never read anything about your business -- instantly like your business? Some answers:

a) Impossible.

b) Say you care about customer service!

c) Make your company look sexy.

Let's pick those suckas above apart:

a: In business -- and in your fabulous life: Nothing's impossible.

b: Yeah, but a million other companies rave about their customer service. To Charlie, you're just another one of those "companies that say they have good service, but oh-no-they-freakin'-don't!"

c: Ding! Ding! Ding! You're correct. Carne asada tacos on us.

Why Sexifying Your Business Attracts People

Before we confuse you -- and before you send us hate mail -- let's define what "sexy" means: "Sexifying your business" means creating an image for your business that visually attracts your target customers. "Fo' sho?" Oh, you betcha.

First, think of your business as a person.

It has values. It has a personality. It has a manifesto.

It loves: __________________.

It dislikes: __________________.

It has heartaches, and it has triumphs. When customers interact with your business, it's like they're interacting with a pseudo-person. For instance:

Why Sexify Your Business

Without interacting with your business in any way, people will already have assigned associations to your business. Think of the usual scenario when meeting someone attractive:

Jane:Oh fo' sheezy. Kathy, look at that freakin' oh-mi-gosh hot guy!

Kathy: Oh-mother-gosh. Oh-mother-gosh.

Jane: He's coming toward our table. Ahhhh!

Hot Guy Hugo:Hey. See ya around.

Kathy:My heart just melted.

Jane:Ahhhh! I bet he's super nice, and ambitious, and loves his parents, and cares for third -world children. He'd risk his life to save a dolphin.

It's the classic halo effect: assigning freakishly positive attributes after judging one independent quality. (And folks, it works vice-versa.) When you see someone/something attractive, your subconscious mind starts associating that positive feeling with other positive-but-totally-independent feelings. According to researchers Eagly, Ashmore, Makhijani, & Longo in Robert Cialdini's Influence: "We automatically assign to good-looking individuals such favorable traits as talent, kindness, honesty, and intelligence. We make these judgements without being aware that physical attractiveness plays a role in the process" Some examples for ya:

"In one study, good grooming of applicants in a simulated employment interview accounted for more favorable hiring decisions than did job qualifications."

"A study of the 1874 Canadian federal elections found that attractive candidates received more than two and a half times as many votes as unattractive clients."

In another study, researchers found that "the handsome men had received significantly lighter sentences."

And another: "A defendant who was better looking than his victim was assessed an average amount of $5,623; but when the victim was more attractive of the two, the average compensation was $10,051."

And finally, Cialdini concludes: "[The good-looking] are better liked, more persuasive, more frequently helped, and seen as possessing more desirable personality traits and greater intellectual capacities."

So without any interaction whatsoever to your business: if people are freakishly attracted to your corporate image, they will form freakishly positive associations to your business.