The Everything Box by Richard Kadrey

If you loved Good Omens and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, you’ll love The Everything Box.

An angel sent to wipe out flood survivors loses his doomsday device: humanity happens.

He spends the next few thousand years looking for the Box.

Coop (reminiscent of a very put-upon Arthur Dent) gets swept up in a mystical tug-of-war for the Box he recently lifted from a fancy estate. Impervious to magic, Coop surrounds himself with criminals (capable of clouding people’s minds, breaking locks), a poltergeist, and best of all, his ex-girlfriend.

Between a stint in a mystical prison, a trip to Jinx Town, and his sudden recruitment by the police, Coop’s inability to hold things together while simultaneously trying to run away ends in world-saving and shenanigans.

Honestly, I could have read an entire novel about the Cladis Abaddonis Lodge and the Caleximus cult pulling pranks on each other.

Favorite quote:

The priest said, “A boar would be the equivalent of a metric ass-ton of corn chips. Did you buy a metric ass-ton of corn chips?”