6 Mistakes to Avoid With Your Wedding Thank Yous

Congrats, you successfully made it down the aisle! You survived the wedding madness and only alienated some of your friends in the process. Unfortunately you’ve still got one task left…and it’s a doozy: your wedding thank yous. Before you flip out, remember that you couldn’t have done it without your friends and family and they deserve some gratitude–all 250 of them. Stay calm! And in case you’d like a more in depth guide on how to write a thank you note, check out our Ultimate Guide.

Here are some wedding thank you note mistakes that you should avoid like the plague:

1. Leaving someone out.

You should be sending thank you cards to everyone who gave you an engagement, bridal shower or wedding gift PLUS anyone who had an important role in your big day. This list should include everyone from your Bridal Party (c’mon, those girls put up with your crazy-ness for months, they deserve a little thanks!), vendors (yeah, you paid them already, but sending that extra something their way will make their day a whole lot better AND make you look super duper sweet), family members who drove you to numerous cake tastings and dress fittings, and everyone else who showed up and threw some dough your way.

2. Misspelling your your guests’ names.

Check and double check that guest list to make sure every impossible-to-pronounce, is-that-even-a-name name gets spelled correctly. Also, don’t forget to include the name of your guests’ plus ones. If you aren’t sure of someone’s name or how it’s spelt, do some detective work and see if anyone else who was there knows. Someone’s gotta be Facebook friends with them, right?

3. Mixing up who attended and who did not.

We get it, you had a big wedding and it’s hard keeping track of all those names and faces. Still, don’t give it away by thanking someone who couldn’t make it for being there or forgetting to thank someone who did attend. Hint hint, check the cards that came with the gifts–usually a guest who couldn’t be there will say something like “I’m sorry I wasn’t able to be there for your special day”.

4. Writing the same generic message for everyone.

“Dear ____, Thank you so much for the gift, we love it. John & I were so happy that you could be there for our special day. Miss you and hope to see you soon” sounds just as boring and impersonal as it looks. Remember, these people love and cherish you and took the time to look through your 50 page long registry just to pick out the perfect salad spinner. They deserve a thoughtful, well-written, personalized thank you note.

5. Sending an e-card.

Although it might seem oh-so-tempting to send out 300 of those e-cards with the animated cherubs, DON’T. Post-wedding thank you notes are one of those occasions where snail mail is an absolute must. I mean, does your 85 year-old grandmother who gave you the family china even know what e-mail is? C’mon, people get your head in the game.

6. Taking a million years to send ’em.

Once upon a time someone started a rumor saying that it was acceptable for couples to send out their thank you cards within a year of the wedding. This is a horrible lie that is making Emily Post roll over in her grave as we speak. You’ve got max 5 to 6 months to get those suckers in the mail. We get that you’re busy being newlyweds and all, but if your guests have forgotten what they gave you by the time your wedding thank yous arrive then you’re doing it wrong.