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Friday, October 29, 2010

Whewww... I didn't realize that my pictures for SIMPONI's visit to LSPR were featured on their blog. So happy!

I was crazily googled my name and it appeared in their blog. Kak Gamulya, the manager of SIMPONI, creditted the pictures to me. Soooo thank you. I thanked him through email and he said nicely that it's code of ethics. I'm proud of him. And so grateful for using and posting my pics...

Briefly, SIMPONI is a community that tries to reach us to aware of environment issue, acknowledge the real situation and do something without being a celebrity to give the society a push. They're doing their mission in visiting many campuses to spread their cause and gather as much as possible the youngsters to join and re-building the environment together.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

So this week is kinda 'the week of disasters'. On Monday, after school at noon, I wanted to go to work and it was raining so bad. I thought it would be over soon, in an hour or two.

But it didn't happen...

Until it was time to go home from work, and I couldn't find a way to go through as the streets were in flood. Ugh... It took about one hour to one hour and a half to get home, while actually it usually takes only 20 - 30 mins. Damn...

When I got home, my tummy was completely hurt. It felt like ulcer, but I got well-scheduled eating time. So, it shouldn't be possible, yet it really happened. The stress I got from the flood and traffic caused this for sure. Thankfully, I got my meds and it's gone not long after that. It was just in time.

But, let's see ... what people said on Twitter! It was completely crazy... I was still lucky anyway. Some people got in traffic for 2 hours to 6 from home to work. One word: Fantastic! Some had to pay around Rp. 1 million ($US 100) for the taxi fare. It's sad, it's a 'wow' and it's funny!

The things got even funnier when Renny Sutiyoso was blamed for this. The traffic and worse flood was said that the TransJakarta development caused the mess. And Renny's father, Mr. Sutiyoso, was the former Jakarta's governor and the one who planned it.

In the kind of situation, still, there were some entertainments for you. Funny and annoying. Imagine when you got in traffic and one of the causes is what your parents did. Get angry to your parents? Forget it!

It is rainy season or it should be. Considering the city hasn't changed that much to be better, flood is already predicted. Traffic? As long as you keep those Indo jetsetters alive in Jakarta, more keewwwll cars will cheer and crowd the street. This week, what we got in town? The car-bike-water mix! Enjoy....

The next day, scary things happened. From the second tsunami and eruption. Don't ask the casualties. It's a lot and it IS bad new. Not funny, annoying, but, yes, it IS tragic.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Next week, I'm going to have a Mid Term Test. One of the schedule is kinda collided with my work. There will be one subject which test I have to take at 1.30 PM to 3.00 PM, and usually I have to be at office at 1.30 PM. It takes one hour and a half to get to work from school.

I decided to contact the academic this noon after classes, saying that I need to have another schedule coz I might be working at the time I have scheduled for the test. Do you know what the academic officer said to me.... She said, "Then, what should do?"

It was weird to me to have her said that. Diplomatically but nice, I replied, "I need you to get me into another test schedule I might fit in."

She said she couldn't do that (with rolling eyes, can you imagine???). The re-arranging schedule is only possible if I'm an cross-enroll student. In fact, I'm not. This situation shocked me, of course. I asked her later on, "What could I do then?"

It's a quite tough case for me and I need advice. Simply, she replied me, "Well then, you have to choose your work or your school." That's all. Period!

I was like, sh*t... how could she be so rude and ignorant to me while actually the money she earns working in that school sourced from the money that I (or my family) earn for paying the admission!

I was too upset that she even didn't help or put any sympathy. When she saw my expressions were around disappointment, sad, and confused, she didn't even put attention to me or feeling sorry for not being able to help.

I wonder these are the people who are receiving the students' money to provide aid and services in return. But this is what I got? What if I work to earn money to pay the admission and if I can't go to work, my boss cut off my paycheck... do they think that they will effect to them?

There are also students who work for earning their school's tuition. What if it happens to them? For this case, I'm still quite lucky. I got my family backup, only for school.

My office is very strict and professional. I can't just get some days off, change the schedule and all. Now, I have to prioritize my school above my work which means I have to talk to my boss, saying that I might need to re-arrange the schedule. Fantastic!

Once, I trusted to be in that school for the education excellence. They seem soooo convincing in their services and all. Yet, this is what I got. I feel betrayed....

Monday, October 25, 2010

I got an assignment for a documentary film. Lifestyle is the category I should make. Firstly, I chose the story of a life of a street performer. In Indonesia (not only here), there are so many things like that. They came out at day and night, earning money is so-called free-styled job. What I am talking here isn't a cool R n B or Hip Hop Dance you can find in French Quarter or a romantic Violist in Arles, but a guy (total guy and isn't a transgendered) who wants to act and dress like a woman and sings with a handmade music instrument.

It's not funny in Indonesia. But what about you who never come to Indonesia?

But, before filming, my friends and I decided to interview the person and see his whole story. By doing so, we know what angle we can put up. We only heard about this person and his simple story. On Saturday night, me and my friends went out to Kemayoran, where we were told that the guy would likely appear. It was my first time there.

And, voila! It was the craziest part of the town. I arrived at 9 PM there and the street was crowded by motorcycles, full but fast. I have to go around by foot and it's hard to walk freely, why? The pedestrians were hacked by street food-sellers. All you can step on is the edge of the road. There were also many other things sold by the road. Under the dark sky without stars, riot sounds from vehicles and the breeze were completely mixed.

Crowded, crowded, crowded!

This city annoyed me more. Like, the biker who wouldn't stop to let you walk across the street. I had to put on this annoyed faces on them, but those bikers just lined up and keep going fast without stopping to let me go. Those guys were completely heartless and brainless. It took 3 minutes for me, just to get through the other side of the road of only 1, 5 meter. No traffic light, and other stuffs. Just bugging bikers.

We went around about 3 times the same quartier and still couldn't find the person we were going to interview. Then, the worst thing in that situation for me was... I wanna pee! There was only food-sellers and in the middle of the road, how could I find the toilet? So I should go across many streets to get through a supermarket, at the first floor of an apartment. Surprisingly, when I got in the toilet at the supermarket, the lamp... was on and off continuously! It wasn't like a 80s discotheque, but a haunted room in horror movies. So I said to myself, "No!"

When I went around another side of the quartier I saw a child friendly area, like balloons, toys and kids food were sold in the street. And they got their own little carousel. Unlike, the other side, where all the bikes were seemed to have a rally and adult entertainments were on the stage, these two worlds could join and make their own town. It's biased one, as somehow it's very dangerous, not only for the wild fast traffic, but also for the crime scene that might happen. I couldn't just take out my cellphone, purse or camera there. So, I have to sneak my cellphone to get some pictures. I didn't say that the people cannot be trusted. Not all of them, we met a guy who helped us to find the person we're looking for. Yet, that place was quite isolated-ly happening.

Anyway, I can say, it's an all-you-can-get town. From various food choices, toys, street karaoke, kids entertainment, tailor, magz and even bunnies!

Bunnies, at the left of a guy in white t-shirt (Click on the picture to enlarge)

Being there... you got to be careful of course. Try not to be looked eye-catching. The bad people there could just approach you in a way you can't avoid. Being there, you might be also entertained by some street singers (the one I was looking).

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Maybe you, Indonesians, might say that I'm a sad Jakartan if I say that a few months ago was the second or the third time I went back to TMII (Taman Mini Indonesia Indah). Ha! Yeap, it was, anyway. I got no choice. So in my age of 20 (20 years living in Jakarta as well) is the moment where is my first time being in Monas, and 2nd or 3rd time to TMII, but it is the first time being the castle in TMII.

Well, the look seems to be like Disney Castle, only it's not glowing, no M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E, no Minnie, no Donald, no Pluto, no Goofy and also the boring Disney Princesses. The major aspect you're going to realize once you see the building that, it's red, brick-y, and, I can say, lack of beauty. Still, it was fun to be there. Taking pictures and weird short chit-chat with friends. And yeah, don't forget the very typical heat of the town.

From the gate of the castle, you got to pay for only Rp. 5,000 (if I'm not mistaken) so around 5 cents to $1. But before you reach the castle, for the entrance to TMII is quite ranging, it depends on whether you're adult or kids and what vehicle that takes you there. That time, I spent Rp 9,000,00 per person.

Inside of the castle is quite spacious and you can jump here and there as you want, as long as there aren't many people visiting =) But actually, I expected more amusements in the castle, as it was called 'Children's Castle'. What made it quite freaky was there were about two clowns in animal costume, like bunny, strolling around and smiling with their hands waving in the air. Heck, that's called clown, if they don't do those things, they're not. You guys can take pic with them, but I didn't want to. Too freaky! Blah...

When I got inside the castle I understand more why this country isn't good for kids, especially for lower middle class kids. It is the true the fact that this country never accommodates enough and appropriate amusements. Indonesia is more devoting itself for adult entertainments, like bar and nightclubs. Kids from middle to upper class would get better appropriate fun in their childhood in Jakarta, as they're Toys Kingdom in Grand Indonesia and Kidzania in Pacific Place.

Why I said so? Kids shouldn't be delivered with darkness spot and gloomy design. Well, the nice thing is the place is quite spacious as long as the whole Indo kids aren't visiting and making troubles, yet, the castle is seemed more to be a museum with playground at the backyard. It was quite dark, no exciting things as kids would get interested in! Yet, the colour inside the castle and darkness make a good tone composition if you take them with DSLR camera. Some little things that I like was the gothic and victorian style (if I'm not mistaken about this) on lamps, portrait frames and cravings.

What else? They provide clean 'service', I mean, trash bins, with nice way... with ANIMALS POSTURES. Somehow, I just don't like the idea to throw any garbage into animals' mouth. For some idiots, that way would only teach them to do bad things to real animals. Like throwing a real garbage into real animals' mouth! Ok, I won't make things worse... those animals no matter what are very cute.

Cute? Yep! At first, I didn't believe they were trash bins. They deserved to be respected statues or whatsoever. Am I sounded overacting?

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Life's a struggle. No life with pressure and hard work, else your life is a waste!

I said it to myself, no matter how people look down on those words of mine many times. Therefore, I choose to take all the risk, sacrifice my teenage ego of being lazy and careless free. Since 2008, I decided to look for a job. Get a job and be independent.

Easy? No. For a (formerly) spoiled 18-year-old girl, it was a tough thing to conquer, yet exciting. Working life feeds my adventure side. The unfilled one part of my soul. Somehow, the steps to take were almost seemed to be impossible to be done perfectly. I'm talking about the forever progress I'm living through... temptation to stay lazy, give up, and be a drama queen. It takes a fight with myself.

I'd looked for jobs, starting from Starbucksbarista (Coffee, hmmm, I'm addicted, but I was considered too young that time), a librarian or bookshop-keeper (coz I love books so much!), to a waitress. I composed my CVs, but only one to Starbucks that I sent off. The rest of the possibility, I cannot find anything match. When I showed my CV (innocently) to my friend, saying that I might be working on those four positions, whatever I can get, he was thrilled! I remember that he said that I could get a better job rather than being barista or A WAITRESS!

Simply I said to him that I just want a simple job, which wasn't that simple actually. Those are tiring jobs and people look down on and never consider fairly. And I want the experiences, lessons, and the feel... Completely, I wanna know how it would be like. Every person has his own path and a story of struggle behind it that I want to live in. I thought it was pretty interesting to try. Sadly, my mom and my bro also think the same. However, I was ready to face something like this.

Luckily, I got a little translating job for a movie script from a friend. Whew.. I was lucky. So happy to earn money myself. No guilty feeling in spending it! LOL.... Then, later on, when I was still 19 years old, I get a job as an English teacher! It was sooo a 'yay'! Lucky, lucky, lucky...

And it's been 10 months. After all ups and down, now it's the right time to call it quit. I will submit my resignation letter in December, before Christmas holiday. I will write the whole stuff next time.

This time is just felt so right to reach my real dream, being a journo in a media I have dreamed! I can't wait! Definitely excited...

By the time goes by, every path seems harder. But, it's the adventure I wanna take anyway, ... the struggle that fills my life up. Life's about struggle, or else, it's nothing.

Friday, October 22, 2010

I always love to write. Going to communication school (although I don't really enjoy the environment of social circle) isn't a big mistake. I learn many things in the big ocean called 'communication'.

Part of being in the ocean is... becoming a journo. As it's a communication school, sooo... having an internal media is a must! Transforming the students to be the reporter and photographer? Big exercise!

Tired? Yes! Stressed-out? No journo would say 'no' :)

What do we need? Commitment. How should we feel? Just enjoy it!

Well, there's a club in my school which has the function as an internal media. We provide newspaper (Gazette) and online news (LSPRisme Online). You can see on http://www.lspr.edu/lsprisme and my nick name there is Marcella under each news I wrote.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

So far, I'd been dating with some foreign guys that I have never met. We dated online. Ha! Yeah, I know it sounds silly, but it was fun! With the time differences, like Jakarta would be 2 PM when LA is 11 or 12 PM or France or Germany is at 8 AM (depends on the season), we have to arrange both of our schedules well to turn on our laptops, sign in Facebook-MSN-AIM-Skype and standby before the webcam. Two of us really got to sacrifice: sleep late and sneaking to chat at work.

Did we succeed to keep going until our first physical meeting? No!

We broke up right months before the time we have actually planned to meet. It was for good. No more sacrifices he could offer and so could I, then it was time to end. As it's all about it.

But somehow, funnier thing is I can talk almost everything to my best cyberfriends. I love them all. Despite the distance, they can understand me well, even they know too much about me. I let them. I trust them. They do the same thing. We breakthrough the fear, suspicions and all. Completely borderless! We deliver trust and positive energy more to our friendships. I have faith with them.

Boyfriend thing doesn't work, friendship can work better. Family communications? Well, you can bet! I'm the youngest girl of 6 in the family. I am truly the youngest as my siblings and I have quite surprising age differences. My 5th sister is 12 years older and my eldest sister is 20 years way older than I am .

We don't communicate a lot with each other, as well as with our parents. Maybe some of my siblings do, but I don't. Special case, me and my mom talk more often. But, it's not all the time that we have a nice conversation, coz mostly we get in a fight on generation differences.

Since early this year, my 5th sister has gone to China to study. I have her email, cellphone number and Skype account. It's been months. But we don't talk that much, nor fight. The funniest, a few weeks ago, we talked about life, religions (as I claimed myself as an Agnostic) and a guy that has stolen my heart since last year (and the love triangle drama included). Remembering this, I thought myself would have been crazy. I never talked that open to my family.

Ive been an alien. In school, in former church... and in my fam. It's hard to find somewhere I can be myself. I'd rather stay in my bedroom and don't come out to stay in the living room or kitchen too long or if I don't need anything from those 'outside world' of mine. The real world around has made me scared and felt little to be myself. That's why, I got distance to the world surround me and then, lost contact. In other words, I lost my ability to interact directly to people who stood before me.

So, starting this blog... I'm ready to start being real me. My real name, my words, my style, my choices... all in my caffeinated life through my naked body. This is gonna be a long process, a long and winding... and could be stormy road, too. I have decided to limit my access to my solitude life in cyber world.

I learn that I need to go out of my hideaway and face people. And to try to communcate is becoming my resolution. For me, it's time to change my POV on both existing world: cyber and real. They got be kept in balance,... yes, both, instead of choosing one of them.

So, it's time to speak up and to stand up tall, and my fam would be the first to see the real me---the side they haven't seen before (Isn't it funny? I've been with them since I was born, yet all I have been doing is denying myself and pretending). I can't lie that I don't need my fam support. But guess. in my situation---unlike other fam or parents which could give you their whole trust and support on what you are and what you do---I have to earn their trust and support. I'll make them believe in me and see that they have been in the wrong lane on interacting and judging me. That way, someday my fam wouldn't be surprise to see what I have done, achieved ... and how the world might look up at me, soon... in real life.

Monday, October 11, 2010

It's not the first time for blogging, only this is the first time of me, being a really myself. And most important of all: more serious in writing, or I can say better one =P

Before a (serious) short bio of me, I can say a lil (or not) about myself....

1. I'm very honest. Yet, I lie sometimes. I'm human (in case you don't know). So, some posts will be very intense, why? I'm very very honest....

2. You might say I'm a traitor of my own country. Back to the point in number 1. I'm very very honest! I'm just saying what I see, and not making them up. If it's something bad, don't blame me!

3. I'm quite fuck*d up with deadline. College is killing me. Work is killing me. Even my hobby is killing (the previous two). Soooo sorry if I might leave without posting anything for quite a long time.

4. In reading this blog, there is a possibility that you think it's written by many different people. But, you're wrong. I'm writing this all along. I'm just a girl with bipolar disorder and Multiple Personality Disorder. Not to forget, I'm having early stadium of Dementia. And if I write same things in many different posts, forgive me... in advance!

5. I'm made of a lot of random stuffs. I promise you, no boring talk.

6. But I can't let you out of my effing silly problems.

7. It's hard to get an inspiration lately, since I'm working in the 3rd year of my blog. I can get it when I'm the bathroom, bookstore, coffee shop..... but mostly, when I'm naked and caffeinated!