Muslim day at Six Flags: on 9/12

by T. Jefferson

Tuesday, Jul 20, 2010 at 1:09 PM EDT

GLENN: We wanted to start with the beach music because it’s Muslim Day at Six Flags and this is an argument we had in the hallway. Well, I shouldn’t say we. All of us in the entire Mercury compound had an argument against Joe, my chief researcher. He’s like, it’s a private company; they can do whatever they want. Yes, Joe, we’re not really arguing that. "It’s a private company. They can have Muslims anytime they want." Yes, they can.

PAT: We know, Joe.

GLENN: We know. They’re a private company. For now, they’re a private company and they can do whatever they want. "Yeah, that’s right, they can do whatever they want." Yes. What we’re arguing here is maybe Muslim Day with all of the kiddies and the, you know, the dragon, you know, floaties around them going to the water park might be in bad taste on 9/12. "They’re a private company, though." I know. "What, you wouldn’t be, you wouldn’t be holding them out if it was another religion." No. I think I would be if the Amish, if it would have been a pack of Amish that took wagon trains and drove them into the World Trade Center and their carriages exploded.

GLENN: I think I would say it’s bad taste to have, you know, horse and buggy day on 9/12. I think I would have been might be bad.

STU: Their use of explosive butter was it was devastating.

PAT: Their churns are quite explosive with the right mixture inside.

GLENN: Abraham, what are you doing? Why, Jedediah, I am just mixing the chemicals for the explosive in our butter churn.

PAT: What is thou doing?

GLENN: (Laughing). Oh, my gosh.

STU: You’d think at the very least a large corporation like this would sit back and say, "Look, you know, I don’t think anyone has any problem with having a day. I think it’s fine."

PAT: It’s fine. Today.

GLENN: Today. Muslim day for a whole week, I don’t really care.

PAT: July 20th.

STU: It seems impossible that they would not realize that this would fire some people up and you wonder why they did it.

GLENN: Yeah.

STU: Like why wouldn’t you pick, you know, July 14th or whatever it was, you know. It seems like they made that specifically for a choice and you wonder as a large corporation, they couldn’t have been so oblivious of this that they didn’t notice.

PAT: There’s no way. Not if they’re Americans. Come on. The sensibilities, that’s what we it’s the same thing we had with the mosque at Ground Zero.

GLENN: Yeah.

PAT: Opening, the grand opening on 9/11 next year, the 10 year anniversary. I mean, it’s just and then you find out all these things about the imam here.

GLENN: Well, what do we know about Six Flags? Do we know anything about Six Flags?

STU: It’s a huge corporation that’s had some financial troubles.

GLENN: Who owns the huge corporation? Who owns it?

PAT: Saudis. I don’t know.

STU: You are just making stuff up.

PAT: Just making stuff up.

GLENN: That sounds you know in today’s world?

PAT: Yemenis.

GLENN: Come to our yack park. The rides are so wild, your kids will be yacking at our yack park, the Yemeni yack! Don’t talk back! That would be great! We’ll have a jingle: Yemeni yack, don’t talk back. I’m opening it in the sands of Saudi Arabia.

PAT: They like it. And then they can have the argument, hey, how can an American open up over here?

GLENN: How come why are they having American day on July 4th?

PAT: Hey.

GLENN: Hey.

PAT: The day they invaded Afghanistan! Wait!

GLENN: Yeah.

PAT: Seriously think about it flipped around like that. If an American corporation were to do something that insensitive, it would never happen. It would never, ever happen.

GLENN: On the day that they on the day that we invaded Iraq, imagine going over and having, at their water park, American day at their water park. You think?

PAT: You think there would be

GLENN: You think there would be anybody here in America that wouldn’t say, "Guys, I think that’s a bad that’s in bad taste. That’s in bad taste." We wouldn’t do it.

PAT: Never.

GLENN: Because that wouldn’t be our intention to stick a stick in their eye.

STU: Especially as a look, the bottom line is

GLENN: Which, bottom line is, I’m bringing up the stick in the eye. I don’t know if

PAT: Oh, boy, here we go. Are we doing it?

GLENN: I don’t

STU: If this is where it’s going, please.

GLENN: Please. I don’t know. I saw a lot of I saw a lot of blogs yesterday. A lot of people are speculating on my possible loss of vision. In fact, I think it goes further than that. It’s total and complete blindness. And they’re speculating now that I may be just faking my eye condition as a ratings ploy, and I have to tell you, you got me. There’s nothing more exciting than listening or watching to someone who is slowly, over his lifetime, possibly going blind.

PAT: Are you willing to turn over your medical records? Can we take a look at the examination? You said you took a bunch of tests. Let’s see em!

GLENN: (Laughing).

PAT: Can we see the spots of discoloration on your retina?

GLENN: May I just answer that?

PAT: Yeah.

GLENN: Sure. You can see them, but I can’t.

PAT: (Laughing).

STU: (Laughing).

GLENN: Well, possibly someday down the road. All right. So anyway, you were saying, Stu? We were talking about? Muslim Day at Six Flags.

STU: I think, you know, like, for example, I doubt there will be many people in what was the example? Afghanistan or Iraq that would make the argument, "Well, that wasn’t normal Americans didn’t attack us. It was that evil George Bush and I think maybe it’s okay."

GLENN: Normal American?

STU: But I think we would make the argument here, we would make the allowance that look, you know, a normal Muslim family it’s Muslim families day, normal Muslim families did not bring down the World Trade Centers.

GLENN: Let me ask you something.

STU: But you think as a large corporation you’d understand some sensitivities and you just wonder why you’d pick that weekend of all weekends to put it there. I mean, are you just asking for controversy?

GLENN: I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t imagine that in 1948 they would have had Japanese Day at the water park on December 8th.

STU: Yes, it would be probably would not have occurred.

GLENN: Like, now, I don’t think that’s really and I you know what? Well, I know this to be true because what Barack Obama says he’s fighting against, only the progressive FDR and Woodrow Wilson did. The Japanese wouldn’t have done it because they were afraid the progressives would round them up, again! So they wouldn’t have so they wouldn’t have done it. But I can’t even imagine a Japanese family thinking that would have been in good taste. I can’t imagine being a Muslim and thinking, "You know what? Honey, let’s get in the car." I think it would be in poor taste. You don’t think now, maybe, now maybe me because I just don’t sometimes you are like, "This is a guy thing." Really? I never thought of it that way. But the Muslim women have got to be like, you know, like my wife. Wouldn’t your wife say, "We are not going to the that’s in poor taste. It’s the day after the anniversary of 9/11."

STU: Well, here’s an example. Let’s say they did a let’s say there was a terrorist attack and it was some crazy Tea Party extremist guy and then, you know, a few years later the day after that attack they have Tea Party day at Six Flags.

GLENN: Let’s do this. Let’s do this. Let’s say that Timothy McVeigh because Oklahoma City. Do you think that you would have tyrants be damned day at the amusement park in Oklahoma? I mean

STU: Because we would argue, hey, look, we had nothing to do, that’s a nut job but still you understand the sensitivities there.

GLENN: You have eight or nine years, would you have, eight or nine years after Oklahoma City and you were still engaging in terrorist activity, there were still terrorists happening around the country and the world by the group of people that, you know, Timothy McVeigh would have been in, okay? Do you think you would have anyone at all that was associated with that group? Even if they say we’re not Tea Parties are a great is a great example. I hate Timothy McVeigh. I don’t think anybody glorifies Timothy McVeigh. I’ve never met anybody that glorifies Timothy McVeigh. The guy was a killer. But I don’t think in Oklahoma City it would be a good idea to have, you know, a big water park day.

STU: A lot of militia members would be like, wait a minute, we had nothing to do with that.

GLENN: Exactly right.

STU: But still you would understand the sensitivities. Especially as a big company you’d understand them. Maybe the members of the group might not pick that up but I mean, if you are a big company and you know this is going on, especially, again, on something that’s known for the date. I mean, Oklahoma City, you know, people know it as Oklahoma City bombing. This is known as the date. It’s known as 9/11.

GLENN: Yeah, you could easily say like 8/28, I didn’t know that was the "I Have a Dream" speech day. But everyone will remember 8/28, coming down the road everyone will remember 8/28 not necessarily with Martin Luther King but they will remember it for what we’re doing because it’s the day. You can easily, I have no idea the day of Oklahoma do you know the day that Oklahoma City was bombed?

GLENN: As long as it drives the left crazy, I’ll do it every day twice a day a hundred times a day. The more they hate it, the more I’m going to do it. I may have to have I may tonight I may have to take an eye test on air. I could schedule it at a different time, but I and it’s painful! Sure, they don’t stick anything in my eyes or anything like that. I just have to look at a card but… (sobbing), oh, the pain! The pain!