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July 28, 2007

I never thought a day would come when I would desperately wish to be in Collinsville, Ill on a beautiful Saturday... but then again no one has ever attempted to fill the world's largest ketchup packet in Collinsville before either. How big is said packet you might wonder? Big enough to be a Guinness Book of World Record contender at 8 feet tall, 4 feet wide and 9 1/2 inches thick. When full it will contain 130 gallons of ketchup (mmmmm!) and weigh ~1,500 pounds.

Heinz is donating 4,000 14oz ketchup bottles, which can be purchased and contributed to the packet for a dollar. All profits go directly to Heinz. Juuuuust kidding. What kind of stunt would this be without a tear jerk factor? The proceeds from the event go to the Collinsville Christian Academy, which is not only celebrating its 25th anniversary, but is trying to rebuild over 4,000sq feet of the school that were lost in a fire just this week.

Being from the midwest, I can see the appeal of doing these events in a fly over state with tightly knit communities - but Heinz should really consider doing the mother of all stunts in DC - like "a nation rallies behind Heinz on The Mall" - that way I can come live blog and eat ketchup... think about it!

July 27, 2007

Well, while we were all waiting for the SeeYouInDecember.com site to lauch, the Batman: Dark Knight promo folks pulled a fast one on us with WhySoSerious.com.

After coming out of the gates strong in late May with this crazy ass viral/ARG teaser - all has been silent on the Batman front...until now. Comic-Con is in full swing in San Diego, and the new site, apparently geared towards those who are in attendance at the event, has popped up on the radar. If you visit the site now, the video, which reportedly gave coordinates for a location in San Diego near Comic-Con and was attempting to "lure recruits" for the Joker, is gone, and a police report summarizing the events is posted.

According to ARGNet, the official ARG for Batman has started. Apparently, those at Comic-Con were given a phone number, 1-800-395-9646, which provides codes to help you log in to various sites. An audio file that provides further clues is available here.

This list always cracks me up, and then quickly reminds me why Washington, D.C. is considered "Hollywood for ugly people." Sure there are a few lookers, but by and large it looks like they grabbed a metro car full of ordinary people, threw some suits on them and went nuts with a digital camera.

This year, the profile's of the winners are much more detailed, and include the person's "nickname", political orientation and dating status. The poses are also about 15,000 times more ridiculous than they were last year (I kind of love this).

Anyway, if you have five minutes of your life you don't care if you get back, check out the list. (But please note that it is TRAVESTY of justice that my secret boyfriend Rep. Tim Ryan (D-OH) did not make the cut. I mean, really. It must be because he's too tall. Who do I talk to about this?)

July 25, 2007

For some reason (can't imagine why...) I'm often perceived by friends and family as some sort of ketchup savant. I get all sorts of questions, "Can you tell Heinz from Hunts?" (yes), "Could you tell that green Heinz they had for awhile from regular Heinz?" (not with my eyes closed), "What do you eat ketchup on?" (mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, chicken, etc. etc.). One that I get most frequently when I'm eating out is, "What's the best way to get ketchup out of a bottle?"

"So, in the case of the full ketchup bottle, the problem can be
divided into two issues: (1) How can I get the ketchup to move aside,
so that air can enter on the opposite side? (2) How can I give the
ketchup "extra weight," so that it will be pulled out of the bottle
faster?

The first issue is solved by holding the bottle sideways, with a
slight downward tilt, rather than upside-down. In this position, the
ketchup naturally is pulled to the lower side of the neck, and the air
naturally will channel along the higher side of the neck. Anyone who
pours an ordinary liquid from a bottle knows this. Yet it is amazing
how the experience is forgotten when it comes to ketchup. Merely holding the bottle in the correct position is not very
effective. It is necessary to "increase the weight" of the ketchup by
applying some G-force. This can be done by tapping the bottle downwards
against your hand, to bring the bottle to an abrupt halt."

July 23, 2007

This year's Emmy nominations came out a few days ago - and I was immediately jazzed to see that NPH (Neil Patrick Harris for those of you who missed Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle) was nominated for his a-wait for it-mazing role as Barney on How I Met Your Mother.

The news that took slightly longer to get to me were the nominations in the Outstanding Original Music & Lyrics category (doesn't that ever sound like a segment you'd TiVo through). You can imagine my surprise when I was scanning Marketing Vox for blog material and saw the article title "Popular Penis Viral Gets Grammy Nod". My confusion was only compounded by the fact that the Grammy's happened six months ago (Marketing Vox erroneously reported a Grammy nod instead of an Emmy nod). At any rate, I'll cut to the chase - turns out Saturday Night Live's immensely popular Dick In a Box sketch turned viral video was nominated in the aforementioned boring category. (The sketch, which features Justin Timberlake has racked up over 24 million views on YouTube.)

Forgetting the fact that these "outstanding lyrics" include lines like, "not gonna give you a diamond ring, that sort of thing don't mean anything, not gonna get you a fancy car, girl you gotta know your my shining star, not gonna get you a house the hills, a girl like you means something real, wanna get you something from the heart...something special... it's my dick in a box," I was not surprised. This nomination is the perfect finale to NBC's come to Jesus with YouTube and video sharing.

I've told this story before, but a long, long time ago (February 2006), there was an equally funny SNL sketch called Lazy Sunday that hit it big online. NBC, like other monoliths of its time, wigged out and pulled the video clip from popular video sharing sites crying copyright infringement - thus squelching the best word of mouth buzz the show had had in years and pissing off the blogosphere in the process. Fast forward a few months and NBC is one of the first major networks to partner with YouTube and go balls out (pun intended) promoting its new fall line up. This Graemmy nom is the perfect salvo to this relationship. While SNL is still not that funny, NBC has announced an online video distribution deal with NewsCorp. The yet to be formed "YouTube killer" will distribute on MSN, AOL, Yahoo! and MySpace - - I guess all good things must come to an end, but its been a great ride.

I got home from the gym just in time to catch the last part of tonight's Democratic debate. Unlike the previous debates, which I've paid half hearted attention to, if I watched at all, I was immediately pulled in by tonight's format - where all of the questions were asked by citizens via presubmitted YouTube videos.

I'd heard about this format and thought it was a great idea, but have to say the execution was really spot on. The questions asked were well selected and the presentations were less jittery than the traditional "town hall" debates. America a.ka. the good, the bad and the ugly scary as shit all showed up to play (scary as shit being the wack job from Michigan (natch) who asked if the candidates would "take care of his babies" and pulled out an assault rifle...). But in all honesty, totally unscripted moments like that - and when a viewers small daughter jumped up behind him and yelled GO DEMOCRATS - were what made the format so interesting and engaging.

While it seemed that the format did not dissuade the candidates from dodging an uncomfortable question, or babbling through Anderson Cooper's "Time.....TIME.....TIMMMME" warnings, the questions were not your average politico-babble dreamed up by the CNN editorial room. They were questions you've asked your friends. The last one of the night was my favorite, a viewer asked the candidates to look to the person on their left and say one thing they liked about them and one thing they didn't. The answers were priceless - there were some very kind words spoken about certain individuals' records, laughs when John Edwards said he was "not sure" about Hilary Clinton's jacket, shock when Joe Biden said he didn't like anything about Kucinich - and then joked he actually liked his wife, and a great note to end on when Kucinich remarked that it's not an accident no one was placed to the "left of him".

The upcoming Republican debate will also feature YouTube video questions, and if I had to guess this is the beginning of a popular new debate format that will likely engage the YouTube generation and older voters alike. YouTube is a huge part of the way we live now, and this debate proved it can be used for more than uploading asinine home-made and marketing webisodes.

July 19, 2007

On the heels of my recent verbal assault against summer television shows I had time to ponder the horrendously bad local advertising in my area. The Lauren Holly March of Dimes commercial is just one of these awful spots. While some are so bad they're good (At Eastern Motors, your job's your credit!) others are sketchy beyond words - like the text for your horoscope (where the fine print asks you to send in your first born after a free trial period) and the cellphones for those who have been denied by carriers.

These ads must be effective in some way - otherwise there would be no psychic phone lines, or services whose sole purpose is to send you jokes to your cell phone. It got me thinking of stuff you could effectively sell through such cheap and hideous looking advertising and one thing came to mind - a service called Hollywood is Calling.

I heard about this a year or two back - Hollywood is Calling features a list of select C-list, D-list and Z-list celebrities that will call your friends and wish them a happy birthday, or just chat. Rates are totally affordable - $19.95 for a live call. (Though something called a "Telephonic Appearance" will run you in the $300's...hey I didn't say this wasn't sketchy!). Most celebs seem to be of my parent's generation, but one totally "rings a bell."

Dennis Haskins is on the list!!!11! For those of you who didn't come of age in the early 90s, Dennis Haskins played the lovable and goofy principal on the hit series Saved by the Bell. For my money, I'd say you could organize an entire cheap television advertising buy for Hollywood is Calling around Mr. Belding. Air it during prime time to catch women and then on some late night Comedy Central to hit the guys - and I guarantee that he'd be scheduled for phone calls from now until infinity. Girls will do it because it's amazing and boys will do it because its hilarious. This is win-win I swear it.

EDIT: I had a great pic of Mr. B, but can't get it uploaded for some reason, so you use your imagination to harness the essences of Belding.

July 18, 2007

Just saw this video (courtesy of The Onion - where else?) and it gave me shivers. Could you imagine if this actually happened? I really WOULD want to CTRL ALT DELETE myself... I can't even picture what mobs of angry dorks, programmers and bloggers would do "Eric Tipton" - it would make Steve Bartman's experience look like a walk in the park.

July 16, 2007

Yes yes yes I am in fact alive. Sorry for the dearth of posts lately, I started a new job last week and am in the 7th layer of new job hell (and totally loving it). Today was the first day I did my job without harassing anyone too much, which is always exciting.

At any rate, I digress. The point of this post was to talk about the trailer for a new JJ Abrams movie. JJ Abrams is the genius that brought us LOST, so dorks everywhere are scouring the clip, which ran before the Transformers movie, for hidden meanings and signs. The mayhem began quickly with bloggers uncovering a microsite, 1-18-08, which many believe is the title of the film (not "Cloverfield", the (working?) title hyped in the first few days following the trailers release). Other bloggers have been left trying to untangle buzz about the movie from buzz about a potential video game and doing damage control to deal with rampant rumors, etc. A t shirt in the preview lead some to uncover a website for a drink called Slusho. I'm sure these are just a few of the rumors that are abound at the moment. Watch the trailer yourself and be the judge:

OK, I'm sure there is some great ARG in the making here, but people who are dead set on finding some clue in all this forget that, in addition to LOST, JJ Abrams ALSO brought us some of the worst televised crap of our time - like Felicity, Six Degrees, and worse... What About Brian. (Hehe, ok, I'm sure this is way cooler than What About Brian but still, JJ Abrams gets a lot of leeway, don't ya think?!!).

1-18-08 (or whatever it's called) and the Batman promo/ARG set the bar for viral promotions pretty high - - we have a lot to keep our eye on for winter 2008.