Santa Claus Disowns Love Child, Makes Him Work in Factory

Sometimes you have to watch something a few hundred times to get what really is going on. Like, for example, at the end of THE WIZARD OF OZ, Toto’s days are numbered, because the thing that made Dorothy leave home . . . has not been favorably resolved. And she has just promised never, ever to leave home. And her aunt and uncle are worse than useless.

In much the same way, one of our readers, Chris Moylan, has noticed something about the 1964 animated classic, RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER that somehow escaped my attention for, oooh, I guess, about 45 years or so. It concerns Hermie, the misfit elf, and his obvious paternity. I think this is brilliant. And persuasively argued:

One consequence of watching anything 45 times is that you notice subtle things, and “Rudolph” is no exception. At the risk of getting on your list of Disturbed Readers, I can’t resist pointing out that Hermie has undoubtedly been labeled a misfit long before becoming interested in dentistry—in fact, from birth. All the other male elves have light bulb-shaped noses, and are bald. Female elves have pointy upturned noses and blonde wavy hairdos. Hermie has a blond wavy hairdo and…a human nose. He’s obviously a half-breed! His hair suggests that his mother is an elf. But the human nose suggests that his father is a human. Who’s the only human male at the North Pole? The more you watch that thing, the less of a good guy Santa seems to be! He chews Rudolph’s father out for having a child with a birth defect; he’s really hard on the poor elf musicians, and he seems to have no relationship with Hermie at all.