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September 15, 2013

CrossFit Black & White

I like to keep this blog free of controversy so today I would like to talk about race. It seems like lately there has been some discussion about the lack of diversity in the CrossFit community so I thought I would weigh in on it. It's been on my mind recently since I was talking to my Dad and he told me that I was 1/32nd Cherokee Indian. I'll be honest. Ever since I found that out I get a little tear in my eye every time someone litters. If you just got that reference it means you're old as dirt like me. Regardless, I'm pretty tired of "The Man" holding me down.

While I don't have a reason to doubt my Dad, based on my skin tone, I am the whitest Native American to ever walk the Earth. My Indian name would probably be "Running Polar Bear". My legs are so white that they play country music and want to marry their cousin. I'm also originally from Mississippi so I'm one salt shaker away from being full on cracker. That's right. I said the "C" word. Now that I have outlined my qualifications to talk about this, here is what got it in my mind. A friend from CFD sent me a link to this article below:

First of all, if you haven't read this blog you should. It's pretty funny. My only real issue was I struggled to determine where he was sarcastic or serious. I think that may be the point. Regardless I'm going to debate a few of his points.

1. The WODs are racist because they have stereotypical "white" names like "Fran" or "Cindy": This one is pretty simple. The girl workouts kick your ass each and every time. Anyone who has ever seen a black girl fight knows she will whoop your ass silly thus if a WOD was named "Beyonce" no one would show up cause they know it would be a stone cold ass kicker. I'm also guessing if there was a WOD named "Beyonce" it would have 99 squats and make you bootylicous...

2. Rhabdomyolsis is racist because Blacks and Hispanics are more susceptible to it: You get Rhabdo by overworking your muscles in a short period of time. I guess that explains those predominately white football, basketball, and soccer teams from all over the world...

3. CrossFit has a strong conservative bias due to it's high number of ex-military and police membership: I honestly can't tell you if this is true or false. There has never really been a point mid WOD where I asked someone what they thought of Obamacare or gun control. I have been thankful that there were members that knew CPR however...

4. Black behavior is to blame: The author makes some pretty valid points around obesity in the African American community however I'm guessing he hasn't looked in the grocery cart of most white people. Do you think that uproar over Twinkies going away came from the inner city? Obesity is a multi cultural issue pal. There are fatties everywhere you look. MOst of them are named Joe Bob or Jimmy Ray...

5. Rich Froning is a white southerner that Django hasn't gotten around to killing yet: That's because Rich outran him....

So sarcasm aside, here is my rebuttal. CrossFit is like life. You only get out of it what you put into it. Nothing will be given to you. If you want to be fit, work for it and quit being a victim. If you want CrossFit to be less expensive, then do it at home. The WODs are posted for free. If you want to make it more affordable for people (of any race) that are economically dis-advantaged, then open one and charge less than your competitors.

Your other option is to sit on your fat ass and bitch about how everyone is holding you back. Now if you will excuse me, I am done ranting and I am going to go watch some NASCAR or hockey...