My mantra as a new mom to any advice given to me, whether it was liked or otherwise, was "I'll take that under consideration." if I liked the advice, I'd look into it further, if not, I let the idea leak out of my head no longer to be thought about (which was most advice).

Sometimes, it might help to leave the room to feed the baby because YOU may need a break, but it may not be realistic with every feed for a month.

With my MIL, it sometimes helps to talk about we are in agreement on, reminding her that I know she clearly raised good kids as i chose her son to be the father of my kids. I guess give a little sugar to her to improve the taste of vinegar you may have in your mouth ;-)

I agree with pp about doing what works for you; you do not need to be apologetic as it is your home. Do as you feel is right to keep the peace for your family's needs.

Good luck!

August 27th, 2012, 08:28 PM

@llli*maddieb

Re: Visitors and breast feeding

I get not wanting conflict-if I am understanding this correctly, your in-laws live in another country and the visit, while long, will not be repeated anytime soon?
Going into another room or covering up in your own house will get old fast, I agree-but for the sake of family harmony, can you live with that for a month? only you know the answer.

As far as unwanted advice-again, for the sake of family harmony, some folks just let it go in one ear and out the other. Obviously you are not going to formula feed your baby just to please your mil.

Also, are you sure your mil would be so rude as to question your parenting choices, to your face, in your own home? Asking when you plan to start formula or do cry it out, is just a question, possibly indicating a lack of knowledge that, of course, is widespread. It's a long way from getting 'offended' because you dare to feed your baby in front of them in your own home. As far as questioning your housework-well, I would show her where the broom closet and toilet cleaner was, with a big smile and “thanks, I could use some help keeping up!” but, that’s me.

How nice it would be to get your in-laws on your side, though. After all, the science and facts entirely support nursing. If they were on board, you could even consider leaving baby with the in laws so you and your husband could have a date. But if they are hostile toward breastfeeding, that is probably not possible. Too bad, for everyone.