Protect your daughters body image

In 2007, Dara Chadwick won a competition to write a personal weight-loss diary for a US fitness magazine, and it proved life-changing in more ways than one. Chadwick grew increasingly concerned that her constant attention on her weight and body would impact on her daughter. Then she came to realise that the way her own mother had felt about her body image had influenced her.

"It was the first time I'd ever really stopped to consider my body-image legacy, or the legacy I was creating for my daughter," says Chadwick, author of the 2009 book Her Mother's Thighs (Finch). "As mothers, how we feel about, and relate to, our own bodies, and the conscious or unconscious expression of that relationship, creates a 'body-image blueprint' for our daughters."

The issue of young girls and poor body image isn't new. In 2005, a survey of 14,000 Australian teenage girls, conducted by Girlfriend magazine, found that over half disliked their bodies, and more than one in two compared their looks to celebrities and cited pressure from media and friends. Many factors are known to influence teens when it comes to body image, but earlier this year, a US psychology professor, Edward Abramson, reported to the American Psychological Association that parents' attitudes and behaviours also have a significant impact on children's eating. And mothers, more than fathers, affect eating habits and body image.

Dr Leah Brennan, a clinical and health psychologist at Monash University in Melbourne, agrees. "The evidence relating to a mother's influence is stronger and there are a couple of reasons for that," she says. "One is that mothers have a stronger role to play in feeding their children, but also most of the studies have tended to focus on mothers and daughters."

In particular, mothers who have struggled with weight and body-image issues of their own may have a strong impact on their daughters' body images. "Most mothers who are doing this are coming from a good place," says Dr Brennan. "They don't want their daughters to have those same weight concerns that they had, so they are doing it from a protective perspective."

Unfortunately, many women turn to dubious methods, or fad diets, to lose weight, "without recognising that they are actually modelling this behaviour", explains Dr Brennan. "It is really difficult, as young girls and boys pick up on this." In September, a Deakin University researcher reported that many new mums feel immense pressure to get back into shape after birth.

Dr Brennan says there is a term psychologists use called "normal discontent", meaning it is normal for a lot of women to be unhappy with their body shape and weight. Author Nikki Goldstein, who instigated the 2005 survey on body image, says mothers are in a "tricky position". "Women expect a lot of themselves, so the last thing I'd want to do is make them feel guilty for their daughters' body-image problems," she says. "But the first person a daughter looks to as a model is her mother.

And if mum is constantly dieting, has low self-esteem and rejects her own body shape and size, the chances are that the girl is going to struggle with body love."For Goldstein, parents have a key role to play in terms of their children's health and wellbeing. "It starts with modelling healthy behaviours, such as exercise and eating right, but more importantly, it's about asserting boundaries and having open, honest discussions with their kids."

Lauren's story

For years, Lauren Ewings, from Sylvania, NSW, had body-image issues. Now 39, and a personal trainer, she has a 13-year-old daughter, Jessie, who appears to be developing her own issues. Ewings used to diet and criticise her own appearance and says Jessie's struggle rakes up bitter memories.

Ewings ensures Jessie eats healthily and constantly reassures her that she is beautiful. "As a toddler, when Jessie started mimicking my actions in the mirror, it was a big wake-up call," she admits. "Since then I have tried to never put myself down in front of my kids. I am hoping they will grow up loving themselves for the person they are."

We collect information about the content (including ads) you use across this site and use it to make both advertising and content more relevant to you on our network and other sites. This is also known as Online Behavioural Advertising. You can find out more about our policy and your choices, including how to opt-out here