Howdy, folks. Stoneman here. That's right, despite my contempt for the constant barrage of petty snark and irresponsible reporting from my fellow "journalists" here at The Outhouse, I remain your only loyal servant, bringing you straight news with no goofy commentary or fake quotes from comic book executives, all of which comes with the seal of approval from the people and organizations I'm reporting on.

Now, my colleagues have been saying all sorts of mean things about Fox's upcoming James Gordon-centric TV series, Gotham. For instance, El Presidente called the show a "police procedural teen drama" and claimed that respected actor Ben McKenzie, who plays James Gordon, is a cartoon character. Jude Terror called actor Drew Powell, who plays a secondary villain on the show, "chubby" and posted photographs of him looking fat and sexy. I don't think Jude is any position to be making fun of someone's weight. He also posted some rampant speculation from iO9 claiming the show would be set in a high school and feature teen versions of all of Batman's villains.

And that's just on this website! You should see what all the Hollywood gossip sites have been posting. Oh, if only I could leave this pit of despair and land a job as a forum moderator at Comic Book Resources. But alas, I'm stuck here, so I might as well just post this synopsis from Fox. The intellectual property owner should be in complete control of the coverage of their product at all times. That's what I believe.

Everyone knows the name Commissioner Gordon. He is one of the crime world’s greatest foes, a man whose reputation is synonymous with law and order. But what is known of Gordon’s story and his rise from rookie detective to Police Commissioner? What did it take to navigate the multiple layers of corruption that secretly ruled Gotham City, the spawning ground of the world’s most iconic villains? And what circumstances created them – the larger-than-life personas who would become Catwoman, The Penguin, The Riddler, Two-Face and The Joker?

“Gotham” is an origin story of the great DC Comics super villains and vigilantes, revealing an entirely new chapter that has never been told. From executive producer/writer Bruno Heller (“The Mentalist,” “Rome”), “Gotham” follows one cop’s rise through a dangerously corrupt city teetering on the edge of evil and chronicles the birth of one of the most popular super heroes of our time.

Growing up in Gotham City’s surrounding suburbs, James Gordon (Ben McKenzie, “Southland,” “The O.C.”) romanticized the city as a glamorous and exciting metropolis where his late father once served as a successful district attorney. Now, two weeks into his new job as a Gotham City detective and engaged to his beloved fiancée, Barbara Kean (Erin Richards, Open Grave, “Breaking In”), Gordon is living his dream – even as he hopes to restore the city back to the pure version he remembers it was as a kid.

Brave, honest and ready to prove himself, the newly-minted detective is partnered with the brash, but shrewd police legend Harvey Bullock (Donal Logue, “Sons of Anarchy,” “Terriers,” “Vikings,” “Copper”), as the two stumble upon the city’s highest-profile case ever: the murder of local billionaires Thomas and Martha Wayne. At the scene of the crime, Gordon meets the sole survivor: the Waynes’ hauntingly intense 12-year-old son, Bruce (David Mazouz, “Touch”), toward whom the young detective feels an inexplicable kinship. Moved by the boy’s profound loss, Gordon vows to catch the killer.

As he navigates the often-underhanded politics of Gotham’s criminal justice system, Gordon will confront imposing gang boss Fish Mooney (Jada Pinkett Smith, The Matrix films, “HawthoRNe,” Collateral), and many of the characters who will become some of fiction’s most renowned, enduring villains, including a teenaged Selina Kyle/the future Catwoman (acting newcomer Camren Bicondova) and Oswald Cobblepot/The Penguin (Robin Lord Taylor, “The Walking Dead,” Another Earth).

Although the crime drama will follow Gordon’s turbulent and singular rise through the Gotham City police department, led by Police Captain Sarah Essen (Zabryna Guevara, “Burn Notice”), it also will focus on the unlikely friendship Gordon forms with the young heir to the Wayne fortune, who is being raised by his unflappable butler, Alfred (Sean Pertwee, “Camelot,” “Elementary”). It is a friendship that will last them all of their lives, playing a crucial role in helping the young boy eventually become the crusader he’s destined to be.

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About the Author - Stoneman

Stoneman is the Chief of Standards and Practices for The Outhouse, and the biggest proponent of eliminating The Outhouse's snarky news initiative and returning journalistic integrity and corporate favor to the site. Stoneman abhors the shock blog antics of internet comics bad boys ThanosCopter, Jude Terror, GHERU, El Presidente, and Frankenstein: Former Agent of S.H.A.D.E., and doesn't really care for the less snarky reporters either, to be honest. Stoneman uses his position to keep the Outhouse writers in check and advance the objectives of the public relations departments of major comic book publishers.