Who isn’t sick of getting all that pesky spam? According to a recent report by the Onion, up to 90% of spam comes from the small East European country of Koy4Goff. The report claims that if these messages were blocked, the country would be virtually wiped off the map.

Remember when you were a kid and were told to wait before you could eat dessert? That excruciating delay caused fits of fidgeting as you fed the dog your dinner in hopes of hastening the glorious sweet treat at the end of the meal.

Sick of drinking beer at parties? Hate it when your buddies stick you with a warm brew? Nothing sucks the fun out of social occasions faster than the same old swill. Well, your lackluster beer-drinking days are about to be supplanted by the best of aged wines … cabernet sauvignon!

Remember when playing with squirt guns was the most fun a kid could have? The little streams of water kept you cool while also providing endless hours of fun. Then Super Soakers reinvented the water fight, blasting water at your foes in torrents!

Think you know what it’s like to be green? Perhaps you recycle compulsively, use earth-friendly cleaning products, drive a hybrid, and wear only organic clothing. Or maybe you believe simply eating organic food is enough to reduce your carbon footprint.

Everyone’s favorite blanket with arm holes — also known as the Snuggie — has returned with a vengeance. Once available only in solids, the new and improved version of the WTF blanket now comes in attractive dead animal prints!

In today’s hurry-up world, who doesn’t eat on the run? We drive, talk on the phone, catch up on e-mail, and do almost any other task while trying to consume a meal. Multitaskers take note: genius inventors have made eating even less of a hassle. Introducing … the fast-food feedbag!

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