Case Number 10635

JAG: THE COMPLETE SECOND SEASON

The Charge

"If this is what being a lawyer is all about, you can have it because
being a lawyer sucks!" -- Bud

Opening Statement

Donald P. Bellisario is no stranger to hit TV. Renowned for such beloved
shows as Magnum, P.I., Airwolf, and my personal favorite cult
television hit Tales of the Gold Monkey, Bellisario has his finger on the
pulse of campy action TV. JAG incorporated many of Bellisario's favorite
themes, and ran for an astonishing ten seasons. Does this add up to television
magic or a ho-hum potboiler?

Facts of the Case

Cmdr. Harmon 'Harm' Rabb, Jr. (David James Elliott, The Untouchables)
is a heroic fighter pilot cum lawyer who investigates and/or defends
people accused of Naval crimes. The line is kinda blurry...more often than not
Harm finds himself pinned down by a spray of bullets, leaping out of Marine
Corps attack helicopters to pursue wayward patriots threatening the sanctity of
American freedom.

He is joined in these escapades by a Marine lawyer cum adventurer
named Lt. Col. Sarah 'Mac' MacKenzie (Catherine Bell, Bruce Almighty).
When she's not trying to disguise the sinful curves beneath her impossibly tight
uniform, Mac is busy standing up to Harm's testosterone-driven (yet deep down,
sensitive) antics. Her equivalent rank gives her an autonomy that her
predecessor Lt. Meg Austin did not enjoy. Together, and with the help of
assistant Lt. Cmdr. Bud Roberts, Jr. (Patrick Labyorteaux, Little House on
the Prairie) and Adm. Albert Jethro 'A.J.' Chegwidden (John M. Jackson,
The Glimmer Man), Harm and Mac untarnish the legal honor of our nation's
Armed Forces.

The Evidence

Television doesn't get any campier than Tales of the Gold Monkey, but
the show has a rabid cult fan base. Magnum, P.I. made Tom Selleck a
household name -- or was it the other way around? And Airwolf was stuffed
to the brim with pseudo-military hocus pocus. None of these shows would be
confused with enduring classics, but they were enjoyable in spite of their
badness. JAG seamlessly fits into this parade of corn, fast cars,
sexiness, and action.

Nevertheless, Judge Cynthia Boris had it right when she said this about
Season One: "I love NCIS which was created by the same team, so I
assumed I'd like this show too. That wasn't the case." Maybe JAG's
earnest military bearing turned me off, or perhaps it was the slow pacing,
cornball acting, trite dialogue, or predictable plots. In any case, watching
JAG was like being hooked up to a IV drip of molasses: between long bouts
of minor discomfort come syrupy does of dialogue and/or pulse-quickening shots
of Catherine Bell. JAG isn't unlikable, per se, it just isn't
memorable.

That's a vague statement, so let's pin it down. One of the better episodes
in this season, "Full Engagement," pits an off-duty Harm and Mac
against murderous poachers in the Appalachians. (Spoilers follow, by the way.)
This trio of criminals wants our favorite Judge Advocate Generals out of the
way. Harm and Mac have no means of transportation, no weapons, and no means of
communication. Yet the poachers fire long range shots at the two, giving them
plenty of time to duck, run away, or pluck spare parts out of a Jeep to fix
Harm's plane. At no point do the poachers simply walk up and shoot them point
blank like dogs. These are the worst hunters I've ever seen. There's even a
scene where Harm is framed directly in a bullseye with his back turned. How can
you miss that shot?

So we have a classic "hare and hounds" episode here. Three
poachers (in other words, guys who make their living hiding in the mountains and
tracking game) are hunting our heroes down. That doesn't stop Harm from stopping
in the woods to deliver a long soliloquy about his father and grandfather. It
doesn't stop Mac from lighting a roaring fire. I guess I'm saying that
JAG has no semblance of logic or realism. This makes it unmemorable,
because there is no clever twist or real tension to stick in the mind. After the
first volley of wayward bullets, I tucked the poachers into the
"incompetent, faceless villains" category and promptly forgot
them.

This same vibe applies to the show in general. It's as though JAG
lifted A Few Good Men's smarmy military trappings and Top Gun's
fixation with military hardware, but forgot to appropriate the edginess and
tension that made those movies work.

The good news is that if you love the show, this set has much to recommend
it. The sound and video are crisp and clear. "Setting Sail on Season
2" is an extensive peek behind the scenes, with reminiscings from the whole
cast and crew. "Inside the Real JAG Corps" has a high fluff factor,
but it also features actual JAG lawyers who poke gentle fun at the show while
explaining how JAG impacted their real life work. The commentaries
feature lots of dead air, particularly Bell's commentary for "We the
People," but fans will glean many rewarding tidbits.

The Rebuttal Witnesses

Catherine Bell looks good in her uniform. By that, I mean she single-handedly
redefines the "woman in uniform" fantasy. From what I gather, David
James Elliott fares well in that department, too.

Cleverly integrated footage gives the show authenticity, such as the
Forrest Gump-like inclusion of Bill Clinton and stock footage from big
budget military flicks.

Closing Statement

Camp is one thing, but generic melodrama is another entirely. JAG had
a good run, but I don't get what the fuss was all about. Nevertheless, if you
like the show, this set should please you because of its decent extras and
polished audio-visual quality.