I have to say, this works. Just like the second gears of war fit perfectly for Gears 1, this thing is a perfect sequel for Gears 2. It feels as if this thing is being written by the makers of the game.

You have the beginnings of a great story here. There are some repeating words, tense changes, repeating sentences, misspellings, and grammatical errors. But overall the story reads good and I'm looking forward to your next installment.