Tag: hard times

And introducing COMPASSION, ACT’s best friend!

Q: How can I get through the dark times?

A: Be kind to yourself. Know that this too shall pass. Beyond the darkness there is light.

Nobody likes dark times. It is human nature to pull away from suffering, to move away from what hurts us and to move towards what pleases us. There is nothing wrong with that. It is the natural human reaction.

However, life is not all about good times. We know that. Being human it goes with the territory that we will all get our share, not always our fair share you might say, of the good, bad and indifferent that life has to offer. The skill then becomes how to deal with it all. How to live a life where we can accept with more equanimity all these things that life will inevitably bring.

Most of us have no difficulty in dealing pretty well with the good stuff. When things are going well we may not appreciate it as much as we might, may even come to expect that life should continue to bestow its bounties upon us, but dealing with the good stuff is not usually a problem.

Even the indifferent may not be too problematic. True, we might wish that life were more exciting, less dull, less routine, but truth be told many of us quite like routine, are not too bothered about having our comfort zones stretched. It’s the bad stuff that causes the difficulties!

Learning to deal with the rough stuff, the unpleasant, the unwelcome, the shocking, the unfair, the unwholesome, the list is endless really. This is where we need a plan. This is where we need a strategy. ACT has a plan. And so does Compassion.

I have written many posts which discuss how ACT canhelp us to deal with the dark times. Now I want to talk about its best friend Compassion.

Compassion is a wonderful ally to have by our side in the dark times. Being kind to ourselves when things are going wrong will be much more helpful than beating ourselves up. For those of us who are self critical and quick to shame and blame ourselves Compassion may be a stranger. When we decide to change that, our internal landscape begins to change too. Try it and see.

It’s official. Compassion is good for you.

I wrote “SHADES OF LIGHT AND DARK” to remind me of that.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

How do you speak to yourself in the dark times?

Do you think being kind to yourself is the soft option or do you think it might help you?

What can you share that might be of help to others?

Please leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.

THOUGHT FOR TODAY

POEM FOR TODAY

SHADES OF LIGHT AND DARK

We can tell if we’ve made progress, if we’re in a better place,

We can look back down the year and we our ups and downs can trace,

And we can see if we’re now standing more securely than we were,

If our heart’s a little lighter, our emotions less astir.

It may be that nothing’s changed much, and yet we are pleased to see

That we’re feeling more contented, more than once we used to be,

And that we’re not so agitated by the vagaries of life,

We somehow can now accept them more, the good times and the strife.

Oh, if we have made such progress then let’s now take time to dwell

On the whys and on the wherefores that have helped us do so well,

On the strategies we’ve practiced, on what programmes we’ve relied,

And let’s appreciate our efforts, all the things that we have tried.

For we know change won’t come easy, it takes effort, sweat and tears,

Fears will not just disappear, we have to learn to manage our fears,

And it maybe our compassion is the ally we have found,

That has reached for us when shaky, helped us move to solid ground.

Oh, this life was never meant to be just walking in the park,

For every time we walk in brightness there’ll be times we walk in dark

And disregarding our resistance, Life says, “Don’t you hiss and spit,

I’ve bequeathed you all you need so you must just get on with it.”

And though we wish that it were other, it’s in dark times that we find

All the jewels that evolution has bequeathed us in our mind,

And if we find that we’ve made progress and the future looks more bright,

‘Twill most likely be the dark times taught us how to reach the light.

If you enjoyed, “SHADES OF LIGHT AND DARK” please pass it on, and do leave your comments. I would love to hear from you.

And just before you go …..

A final word from ACT, and its best friend COMPASSION ……..

If you want to learn more about Compassion, and I really hope you do, then there are some great resources on line. I particularly like the work of Dr Kristin Neff. She is one of the leading authorities on Compassion and Self Compassion and I visit her site often. You can find it at selfcompassion.org

There is a wealth of material including videos, guided meditations, exercises, tips for practice, resources etc. Do go and visit. You will not be disappointed.

ACTivation Point!

SO ……………………….

How about YOU?

What can YOU do just for today to ACTivate your life? What can YOU do just for today to add some Compassion, some Kindness, into your life?

Just for today I will ………………………

If you have read this far, please do leave your comments. How is ACT helping you? Is Compassion part of your life?

I am a student of ACT, I am learning about Compassion.I am on a journey. I would love you to join me.