Try out as many firearms as you can, and choose the one you like the best. All I have to say on this particular issue is going to be a polymer compact pistol with that particular round is going to be pretty snappy as far as recoil goes.

I have really enjoyed my XD45, except for the ammo cost. If i wanted a carry piece (i don't carry), i would consider the XD45 compact model. IME, the .45ACP has more of a "push" than a "kick" or "snap", recoil-wise.
I agree with the "test drive many to limit disappointment" idea.

For the life of me I just don't understand why so many newcomers want a .40 as their first handgun. Of all the common pistol calibers, it's the most difficult to shoot well and has a nasty sharp recoil pulse that almost guarantees developing a flinch...

For the life of me I just don't understand why so many newcomers want a .40 as their first handgun. Of all the common pistol calibers, it's the most difficult to shoot well and has a nasty sharp recoil pulse that almost guarantees developing a flinch...

Hit up a gun store and check some pistols out and/or stop by a range that rents pistols. Try a few out, different styles, makes, manufacturers. Also try different calibers too and try to find one that will fit your uses/needs.

I went right to a .45acp because i felt comfortable enough that I could learn on it. Some would feel more comfortable with a .22. 10 different folks can give you 10 different opinions, all of them valuable.

TBH, I always recommend a nice .22 pistol to learn the basics cheaply.

Many folks decide they need a gun for protection, buy the biggest they can afford along with a box of shells, and then put it in a dresser. Handguns are not that easy to shoot well and it takes a LOT of practice to become proficient. Practice costs money in terms of ammo so learning with a .22 makes sense.

If a .22 is not practical, I'd recommend 9mm for a semi-auto or .357 Magnum (can shoot cheaper .38 Special) for a revolver.

I knew I was having deja vu as I typed this, sure enough this is the second time today I gave the same basic info...

+1 for what NGIB suggested. Never discount wheel guns. The Ruger GP100 is a great pitol. I would also suggest taking a look at the Bersa Thunder .45 for a first semi. Both of these would be viable options if you decide you want a "full powered" pistol as opposed to the forementioned .22LR options. Of course, if you want to up your budget a bit, there are quite a few 1911 fans here, myself included, and you can always put a .22 conversion kit on it for practice.

TBH, I always recommend a nice .22 pistol to learn the basics cheaply.

Many folks decide they need a gun for protection, buy the biggest they can afford along with a box of shells, and then put it in a dresser. Handguns are not that easy to shoot well and it takes a LOT of practice to become proficient. Practice costs money in terms of ammo so learning with a .22 makes sense.

If a .22 is not practical, I'd recommend 9mm for a semi-auto or .357 Magnum (can shoot cheaper .38 Special) for a revolver.

I knew I was having deja vu as I typed this, sure enough this is the second time today I gave the same basic info...

I agree wholeheartedly. A .22 would be the best money can you spend to get into firearms. I would go one further and recommend a double action revolver in .22. Develop your skills and have fun shooting, then you will be able to move to your desired carry weapon from there. I have taught several friends to shoot using this method and it has worked well.

Forget the .40 cal. Go with a 9mm and don't worry about recoil at all. I would suggest a Glock 19. Great gun which you can get for under 5 bills. As far as carry rounds look at the Hornady critical defense. This combo will put anyone down. But then again, its just another opinion. Good luck bro. Ed

As everyone else has already said, you should consider a 9mm for your first handgun. I myself am guilty of buying a 40 for my first pistol, and while I was very happy with the gun (S&W M&P 40) and it's accuracy, the cost of ammo was too expensive. I sold off the M&P 40 and bought a Beretta 92fs 9mm. In the past I would spend about $30 for 50 rounds of 40S&W, now I buy 50 rounds of 9mm for $13.

If you've never shot, then yeah, get you a .22 and practice until you go blind.

Sure the 9mm will make a better learning tool, not just due to the recoil, but ammo cost as well, however a good revolver in .357 will serve you MUCH better over the course of your shooting career. The versatility of ammo, .38 target loads all the way up to .357 mag 200 gr full house hunting ammo and everything in between.

In addition an old Ruger "Single-six" in .22/.22mag will learn you great and a revolver chambered in .357 will complement your skills learned on the rim-fire. A natural transition.

I recently helped turn out a noob with the same combo (female, about 120 lbs) and she bought a Ruger "security-six" for her first and shoots it plenty well for 2 and 4 legged defense. The 9mm will help out OK with 2 legged predators, but nothing but a nuisance for 4 legged ones. Why not cover all bases?