The Roller Coaster

I have never been best friends with speed and heights, which is why I can count on my fingers all the times I have taken a roller coaster ride: 3 in total. I still remember to be very excited with the idea, a little bit nervous while I waited on line and full of different feelings during the whole ride. The first time the cart started moving, I experienced that happy-nervously feeling that makes you giggle because of the unknown. Ok, I knew in theory what was going to happen, but my own lack of experience was increasing my concern. As soon as the cart started rolling on the first coaster I screamed with my heart, and I continued screaming during the rest of the ride. Sometimes I stopped for a good laugh, sometimes I cried, but the feeling of concern remained the same all the time. I was never brave enough to raise my arms; I was grabbing the front handle until the end. When the cart stopped, my hands were sweaty, my eyes tearful and I did not know if I wanted to laugh or cry. I was still nervous but my heart was happy and full of energy; I even felt that I wanted to do it again. I am not sure how many times we went up and down, the whole ride happened in a blink. Many years later, again I feel the same. This time on top of the highest, longest and bumpiest roller coaster ever known: motherhood. I am just starting the ride, I hope this time I will be able to raise my arms.