if i were the coolest guy
on planet earth
i would drive the tank jeep
from aliens
and it would be painted by
salvador dali’s reincarnation
inside it would be covered by diamonds
and then by velcro
i would wear the original underwear
neil armstrong wore when he walked on moon
and i would talk only using
movie quotes
because my brain
would be instantly connected
to imdb.com
i would not use money
money would use me
my woman would be
the coolest woman on planet earth
but that is a subject
for another poem