the ht link speed is displayed in mhz, so its (if I remember right) 200, 400, 600, 800 ...2000 in the bois, so im guessing set it too 2000mhz?
also if I leave the ram at x10 its 1667mhz 9-9-9-24 1.5v, should I up the volts or settings?

I don't think RAM has a x10 settings. The NB/CPU does. RAM is 400, 533, 800, etc. There's a math to follow to find RAM speed depending on that setting but I can't remember what it is as I have it written down at home. For now though, set it to one of those, boot, look in CPU-Z and see what the RAM speed really is.

could it be a temp issue. i know that voltage for the cpu at 3500 is high so that should be no problem, ht is close to stock, try and lower your nb down to stock aswell to eliminate that.
what brand ram have you got and what slots is it in, the 2nd n last from the cpu socket is supposed be better for overclocking ive heard.

Trying those settings now, prime95 is running and at least didnt crash in the first 2-3 seconds.
cpu is staying around 43c while running prime.

I'm thinking this is all about ram settings, I remember reading on a forum post a guy getting to 3.5ghz with the same cpu/mb as me and in the end it was his ram timings, it use his settings but my ram is different.