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December 13, 2012

Well, That Was One Big Bad Touch

I feel it necessary to offer a disclaimer and make you all aware that I am actually not a prude, even though someone in the comments section of this very blog once implied that I am a virgin who can't drive because I mentioned being unable to watch or listen to Marlena and John kissing on Days of Our Lives without praying for blindness, and also that I love soapy lightheartedness. Seriously, bring on all sorts of zany things and nine times out of ten, I will squeal delightedly because I have a lot in common with toddlers.

But today was ten percenter, because our lightheartedness took a turn for the...incesty.

Olivia, to her son, who had his pants around his ankles because he was in the midst of preparing to make a sperm donation. Because randoms can just barge in on people when that is happening, but honestly, read that again! A mother and her son, who was attempting to...self complete. This is the most disturbing combination of words that can be spoken during this bizarre and unrealistic scenario: I just wanted to tell you that I love you and I'm with you every step of the way.

AHHHH, amirite?

And then basically IMMEDIATELY after that familiar weirdness, I saw the Folgers commercial in which the overeager sister is just a little and by "a little", I mean "Um, EW", too excited that her brother is home for Christmas and I sort of want to go shower with, like, lye.

That Folgers commercial is SUPER-INCESTY! Every time I see it I think of the Flowers In The Attic (yep, my mom read lots of V.C. Andrews when I was a kid.) Just, ewwww. That commercial is grosser than today's GH.

LOVED, LOVED, LOVED the OLTL reference of "Hold The Diploma." I got a kick out of the shenagigans surrounding Dante's "donation." Yes, as silly as it was, the actors were fun to watch. Dominic Zamprogna is great to watch and I love how committed Lisa LoCicero is as an actress. Under a lesser actress, Psy-Olivia would be unwatchable. Now, I wish Olivia had something else to do besides have "visions." With news of Scott Reeves leaving I hope Olivia gets a love interest or a triangle. I'd be open to seeing Olivia chem-tested with Sonny, Robert, Mac, AJ, and even Johnny again.

Now, I wanted more of a hospital focus but this is not what I had in mind...Sabrina, Britt and Felix are walking character traits instead of realized characters. They belong on a poorly scripted sitcom. I think all of the actors seems capable but the characters are too shallow to care about. Sabrina and Britt have been onscreen too long to know nothing about them beyond their inappropriate desires for Patrick (he's the trophy.) Despite the writing, I don't root for Sabrina and hate Britt. I find them both to be wastes. After months when I see Britt and Sabrina I roll my eyes and struggle to remember their names. The writing in this story is so lazy. I wish Ellie were involved in Nurses' Ball because she's been a breath of fresh air.

I'm not a dog person and I would consider restructuring my entire life for that adorable pup!

I loved today's episode because it was Scorpio-focused. Mac being so sweet to Maxie. Patrick reminiscing over his family. Anna & Robert being bad-ass. Robin being awesome (Kimberly McCullough has more strong dialogue as Robin strapped to a gurney than in years under the two previous head writers.) The Scorpios are a strong family unit and can drive story.

as usual even during something of this nature dante doesnt think "WAIT LET ME LOCK THE DOOR AND CLOSE THE BLINDS" He did this AFTER his mom barged in. Im suprised the queen of barging in on people CARLY didnt come barreling in offering to help him LMAO!
Oh and the business with olivia seeing what is a puppy with a bib i THINK that is supposed to be a JACKEL "JACKEL" being what spinelli calls himself. so GH is implying that maxi will be really pregnant but with a baby of the JACKEL SPINELLI and not with lulu and dantes baby. I think that ellie will find this out first and because she works in the lab change the results in the lab somehow to make all concerned THINK it is lulu and dantes kid.

SHERI...a little far fetched. I don't think Maxie and Spinelli ever slept together, and certainly not recently enough for him to get her pregnant.

The Olivia walking in on Dante stuff was disgusting!! And why the hell did that nurse (Felix?) tell Liv where Dante was? He knew full well what Dante was doing and that he should not be disturbed. The whole thing was one giant plot-point.

I am so loving the Super-Spy-Revisited storyline right now. And I'm glad the Faison stuff didn't go on for too long, as so many writers are prone to do...drag out a good thing until we can't stand it any more and end up hating a character.

'SZima: I think SHERI is on to something about jackal representing Maxie and Spinelli's baby. Maxie is no pregnant yet, so she could have sex with Spinelli around the time she is implanted with Lulu/Dante's egg. I'm goin to take it a step further and predict that Maxie will become pregnant with twins, one Lante's baby and the other Spixie's pup.

Oh, please no. . . no jackal baby. Ugh. I'm hoping it means that Dante becomes a k-9 cop or something. . .anything else. . .maybe it means that they rescue a puppy for Christmas and THEN they have their OWN baby!

Surely there is enough drama with a baby being born of a surrogacy and a heart transplant recipient and all WITHOUT adding a "whose baby is it" plot. UGH.

I think it would be a great storyline if Maxie got pregnant with Dante and Lulu's baby and then Lulu got pregnant with their baby AND was able to carry it. . . then they'd sorta have twins but NOT. . . I don't think that's been done on a soap before. . . hello. . .could we please avoid a jackal baby people?

On the Dante/Olivia stuff. . . I wasn't too grossed out by it. In all honesty I thought they were going for a "Seinfeld - esque" George gets caught by his mom type thing.

I thought it was kinda funny and thought Olivia running through the scene half out of embarrassment and half because she doesn't actually want to look at anyone cause she doesn't want to have any more puppy visions, was cute!! *note, she may also not have wanted to look at anyone because of what she just saw when she burst into Dante's hospital room.

And if the coffee commercial is the one I'm thinking of, I'm not bothered by that either! Maybe I have a high tolerance for expressive love among family members??? Hmn. I DID think Claudia was a little too "close" to Johnny though.

I just thought the Dante sperm donation was hysterical and totally Lante! Dominic Z and Julie are awesome at comedy/drama, whatever they throw at them. I was not bothered at all with the Liv/Dante scenes they were totally in character for Liv! ( and Felix just sent her because he was distracted). All of it just lead up to Lulu having to "help" Dante with his donation. I love that this baby (if it is in fact going to be carried by Maxie) was concieved "Lante style".
I love Felix! He is a hoot. And Dr. Brit's i will leave him in your hands and Felix's "I wish". It was all just fun. And the puppy, could he be any cuter. I really look forward to what it is all about.