Monday, October 26, 2009

Get off your cross...they're gonna need it at the church come Easter!

I am skilled and educated in many, many things. There may be NOTHING I am more educated in than the concept of martyrdom. Specifically, as it plays out in interpersonal relationships.

In my family, we learn martyrdom before other less important things like walking and bladder control. I'm fairly sure the secret proudest moment in a Vans Evers' parental life is the moment the little devil first puts the back of its wrist to its forehead in a gesture that would make Scarlett O'Hara proud. I have only recently come to recognize some of the magnificent moments of martyrdom exhibited by my beloved grandparents throughout their lives. In other words? We're pretty damned impressive when you consider the family is neither Catholic nor Jewish (my current religious affiliation aside).

I have had martyrs try to impress me...or rather try to manipulate me. They have NO idea what they're up against, really. You'd think I'd have more appreciation and, perhaps, sympathy for these impresarios. But those of you who know me best realize that I mock and judge them harshly. By the same token, I'm unforgiving with my own martyrdom. Unfortunately, I'm so good at it that often even I can't detect it. Ok, so THOSE moments give me a little pride.

I wonder what our kids will learn of martyrdom. With my mother and I both in the house, the potential teaching moments will be endless. Hopefully, she and I can keep each other in check. Hell, with any luck, the kids will call us on it.