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As entertainment critic Roger
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In the first year of the pool, we had minimal casualties in Week #1. As in 'None.' Year Two came, and a few people dropped the initial sharp-edged slate into a major artery, but most people remembered to wear their picking gloves. And in Year Three...

Go ahead, blame the lockout. Blame the commissioner. You can even blame Canada if you really want to. At least that would give a wider range of places to haunt.

Tap-dancing through a minefield is a really good way to discover which ones are armed.

because counting on kerry collins is a historically sound idea

KidFlash

had a really Radical idea

Starshine

and yes, I wanted another year to use that one

so who told you alliances worked in this game?

Molaholic

have you met the members of our death panel?

Bondt007

I just want to note that he switched his pick from a death team to another death team. Sentients and gentlebeings, the Western Divisions.

does this every incarnation year

Estee

brownout

AyaK

The double lesson: never count on Cleveland for anything.

da suicide!

Newsomewayne

double your pick attempts, double your stab wounds

Zipperhead

so how are those preseason spoilers working out for you?

Yogi

See, Jims? It can be done!

actually, Canada's post-mortem blaming us

PepeLePew

And of course:

was literally late to his own funeral

Bullzeye

Count 'em. That's eleven corpses found within the blast radius of Launch Day, only a few of which went down due to that whole 'stand right under multiple rockets for the best view' idea. I think a round of applause is mandatory. Or at least a round of noseplugs. Gawds, the charring stinks.

One (current) survivor managed to take a chance that paid off -- as in 'he lived through it' -- and with a successful two-game combo pick representing one from each personality, we have a Lockout winner: Cahaya. He now has a power. He may or may not live long enough to use it. In fact, I have a special coffin with a stick-sized sidecar waiting. But don't let that bother anyone in any way. Or for that matter, serve as a comfort, because the Lockout remains armed until used. Or until the schedule defuses the holder. Sure, let's say 'defused': that's a new one...

And while it means nothing for power excepting elemental conversion (oxygen to carbon dioxide), ScubaSteve gets the first Only Just award of the season. However, as a courtesy, it will be delivered to Tony Romo's house. Mr. Romo really needs the recognition. For starters, he should learn to recognize his own receivers.

This week's torture implement catalog:

Kansas City at Detroit Oakland at Buffalo Tampa Bay at Minnesota Chicago at New Orleans Baltimore at Tennessee Cleveland at Indianapolis Jacksonville at NY Jets Seattle at Pittsburgh Arizona at Washington Green Bay at Carolina Dallas at San Francisco San Diego at New England Houston at Miami Cincinnati at Denver Philadelphia at Atlanta St. Louis at NY Giants

It's as if you're trying to get to the afterlife before the best seats are gone.

I'm lobbying for an Only Just for last week. You may have forgotten how close I came to death 5 days ago. My life was flashing before me as my pulse escalated to 112 while I sat in front of the computer. NawLins ended up on the 1 yard line with an extra untimed play after 60 minutes had expired - only just...

This week to me is as unpredictable as last week. In fact, I'm so scared of this week I won't pick Carolina because I'm afraid the Camster might just run over my boy in pre-game and take him out. O

Oh - I figured out who Jordan is from inadvertently reading another thresd where she was mentioned. I still don't understand the comment, but at least I think I understand the context now.

Y'do know what the cost of shipping is to your area, right? Besides, it's a suicide pool and while the Packers survived a death scare, Dallas actively worked to kill itself. But if you truly want an Only Just for your very own, I'll send you the basic design and you can have one made locally. Hint: the carving on the noose should be counterclockwise.

The good news? I made my pick on time in my other suicide pool. The bad news? I picked the Browns to win. My 2011 average is 1/2 game of survival. It feels like swimming to shore for the cast-off ceremony.

Areas like that really can depend on company. I usually still had service in Yellowstone and other remote places we did field research. Really annoyed one guy who actually picked a service based on who claimed they would have service in those areas. He was the one with the worst luck in getting a signal.

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