Real Sh*t

Today’s post is brought to you by a recent funk that I had been in, and I was desperate to snap out of it ASAP. I’m sure you’ve had days like this, yeah? Sometimes it happens for what seems like no reason.

I want to share all of the things that I do to snap out of it quickly. Before I get into it, I’m not implying that I am a professional when it comes to therapy or counseling. I don’t have it all together, but these are methods that really help.

CONFIDENCE. It is the single most important embodiment to own because it makes all the difference in how you feel and what amazing things may come your way…when you attract them. When you have confidence, it radiates.

Yes, it can be hard in 2018 with social media – comparison sucks. But the key here is to DO YOU. There is only one you…let it shine and own it.

It has taken me almost 31 years to feel confident and comfortable in my own skin. Of course I am not all the way THERE, but man have I made progress. Here are five tips/techniques that have served me well in the confidence department…

1. Change your mindset/think positive

This one is so simple yet makes such a huge difference when put into practice. Here’s what has worked very well for me: replace one negative thought with three positive thoughts. Taking part in this practice has massively changed my outlook on everything. Even the bad things in life come with positives, and I love to look at life this way.

I think of this replacement technique as designing my thoughts and future. There is no place for constant negativity.

2. Stop comparing yourself and focus on YOU

Who cares what other people are doing/if someone has a larger social media following than you/is thinner than you…the list goes on. Jealousy does no favors. Take the time to acknowledge these comparisons and how you feel, and then move on and focus on your goals, dreams, and ambitions.

3. Face your fears

Fear can threaten your physical self and our ability to regulate emotions because fear usually means that we do not feel in control…AKA not a good place to be.

It’s clear then how damaging the influence of fear can be, therefore it’s all the more important to realize that you can never truly run from your fears. You can keep running, or you can face your fears and then CONQUER them.

Ladies, this one has been very hard for me, but I practice all the time and I do it in small doses. I had always been that person to push things to the corner, or say “I’ll deal with this later”, but that did not serve me at all. Here is what I have done with every single fear that comes up for me:

+ Identify the fear: This is where you’ll work on the uncomfortable truth. Accept it, it is what it is. Once you accept it, this fear becomes a lot smaller just by beating the mental game.

+ Visualize overcoming that fear: What will it look like once you overcome your fear? How will you feel? Be as specific as possible when visualizing this.

+ Take action: Stay calm and GO! Tackle your fear with a to-do list/plan of action. By conquering your fears and getting extremely uncomfortable, you will feel so empowered. Trust me.

4. Spend time alone and talk to yourself

Getting to know yourself is SO FUN. I love spending time alone, whether it’s going to the gym on my own, running errands, or just staying at home and reading a good book really is the best. It is so important to strengthen the relationship you have with yourself. We cannot always rely on others, we have to be able to pick ourselves up, give yourselves that pep talk, pat ourselves on the back, and reassure ourselves.

And yes, I talk to myself. Try checking in with yourself at least once daily and ask yourself how you feel. Is something bugging you? Are you excited about something? Pause and ask yourself how you feel, and allow yourself to think through your options if a decision needs to be made – a decision that you can feel confident about. Also, trust your gut. 99% of the time, it is right.

5. Dress up for YOU

There’s no denying that slipping on something like a simple and gorgeous LBD gives us that extra pep in our step. Or that wearing a chic blazer during a big meeting helps you own a room. Clothing, accessories, and makeup all play a huge role in confidence. When you look good, you FEEL good.

Speaking of clothes, this jumpsuit is just perfect for owning your confidence. Not only is it RED, but it’s also so flirty & chic. Love how comfortable it is too.