Communicating with Spirit

When a love ones make the transition to the world of spirit, those of us still on the earth plane, experience intense grief.

Grief is one of the hardest things to cope with in life, but cope we must, because as we get older, many people in our lives will enter the world of spirit before we do. However difficult, there are ways to cope with grief. Following are some suggestions:

Join a “Grief Group.” Being with others who are also experiencing grief can be extremely helpful, even though the idea may not be appealing at first. One of my clients said to me “Why do I want to be with all those sad people?” I told her that being with others who are sad would allow her compassion for others to come forward and she would find herself helping others who are in emotional pain. There is nothing more healing than helping another person.

Invite Distraction: If you are in emotional pain, you NEED a break. Rent movies, go to a museum or do anything else that will distract you from your pain. Of course if you watch a movie there will be things that will remind you of the loved one you have lost. Most likely your relief from your grief will not be 100%, but right now even 50% relief would be great for you.

Read Positive Books: While it may make you angry when people suggest that you think positively when you are in grief, that is exactly what you need to do. Never have you needed positive thinking as much as you do now. It is only through faith that life will get better someday, that any of us can withstand the heart breaking feelings of grief. Go to the library, your book shelf or the bookstore and get books by positive authors. I will suggest one of my book/CD packages that is especially helpful to those in grief. It is called “Heart and Sound.” Books by Eckhart Tolle will also be good for you at this time.

Know that Life is Eternal: As a psychic medium, I have it proven to me again and again, that when we die, our spirits live on. Having this knowledge has helped me to understand that my loved ones in the world of spirit are still there for me. I also know they are ok. Those who had cancer do not have cancer anymore. Those who had mental problems, do not have mental problems anymore. I also know that when it is my time to go to spirit, I will be with my loved ones, and in the meantime, their spirits are around me, watching over me. If you feel inclined, visit a Spiritualist church as we in the religion of Spiritualism understand that life is eternal and we communicate with those who have passed on. You do not have to be a Spiritualist to attend a service.

Take Extra Care of Yourself: When you are in deep grief, you must do everything you can to take good care of yourself. This is the time to eat healthy food, exercise and get enough sleep. Take a look at your schedule and make sure that you have time to do what you need to do for yourself. Also make time to be with the people you feel comfortable with. In some cases, you may have to take a trip to spend time with a family member or close friend.

Grief is DIFFICULT to cope with and if you want to cope you need to WORK HARD to cope. You cannot allow yourself to be wrapped in your grief 24/7. Know that your loved one in spirit would not want you to do that. Our loved ones who have passed on, want us to live happily for the rest of our lives.

Let us not be afraid to face our grief. Grief is no fun: in fact it can make us feel sick to our stomachs, like fainting, and can ruin our lives totally if we do not learn how to cope with it. Just as joy is part of human life: so is grief. None of us can escape it in our lives and so we must learn how to cope with grief.

As a psychic medium I talk to many people who are in deep grief over the loss of loved ones who have passed on. Death causes grief for the living and there are also others things that cause grief. As I look into my own life and the lives of my friends, I find that all of us experience grief over many kinds of situations: divorce, illness, separation, prejudice, lack of understanding among those we love. The list of the situations that cause deep grief goes on and on. What to do? How to cope? Who to listen to? Does anyone really have the answer on how we can best cope with grief?

In my experience with myself and with others: grief is a very personal and individual matter. It is not possible to tell someone how to cope with grief. While suggestions can be made, there is no one process that will work for everyone. Hopefully grief causes each one of us to searh our souls for the meaning of life. In the best of times we can look grief straight in the eyes and cope. Those of us who shove our grief into a place where we cannot feel it, often push all of our other feelings away too, and find ourselves unable to experience much of anything. While it is not a good idea to dwell on our grief, avoiding it entirely can become an emotional disaster.

My prayer is that each one of us can find ways to share our grief so that we do not have to be alone with it. My hope is that we can talk to each other and not feel ashamed of feeling sad. While some of us like to project an attitude that says “I am always happy” in my humble opinion most people who project that attitude are fooling themselves.
They are not facing all of the dimensions of the human experience, and as they push away grief, they may also be pushing many other feelings into the unknown.

Let us face ourselves with our grief and in doing so also find the happiness and joy that comes with honesty. As we look within we will find all kinds of things and that is what life is all about.

Acceptance is the key to coping with grief. There are some things that we cannot change, such as the passing of a loved one, or the failure of an important relationship. In the normal course of life on earth, all that can be counted on is change. It is difficult, it is tearful and there is never a good reason to push our feelings under the rug and pretend that all is happiness and bliss. There is also never a good reason to become victims of our grief. It is possible for any one of us to experience deep feelings of sadness, and then an hour later have a wonderful time. We do not need to stay stuck on our grief and in fact I often advise my clients who are experiencing deep sorrow, to take “grief breaks.” Take a walk, watch a funny movie, dance around the room or clean out that closet you have been meaning to clean out for months (or years?).

When speaking to a client last night she wanted to know when all these bad things were going to stop happening, and I said that everything that was happening to her were normal things that happen to us all, and in fact, these things would never stop happening. People would continue to become ill and pass on, there would continue to be occasional problems at work, but that did not mean that she could not have a wonderful and positive life if she wanted to.

Our “problems” do not have to ruin our lives unless we let them. Each one of us can choose to have a positive attitude. While coping with feelings of grief we can still have a positive attitude. We cannot allow ourselves to become victims because we have challenges.

Life is a mixed bag as we all know. When there are opportunities for happy moments, grab them. Happiness is there for you, just as grief is. It is all a matter of balance.

About...

Carole Lynne is a psychic medium, author and minister interested in the spiritual evolution of the soul. Ms. Lynne offers private and group readings, and volunteers for many Spiritualist churches. Learn more at www.carolelynne.com