Things about your SO you shouldn’t disclose to friends

You told them when you found someone, relied on them when you were going through a breakup, and you have been there for them when they went through tough patches. Yet, once you are in a relationship, you need to be careful in maintaining the balance between your SO and your friends. Observe certain boundaries in what you reveal to your friends about your relationship, and how much. We have a few tips to observe some discretion.

An exact account of your fightsIf you need to vent, all right, say that you had an argument with your partner, but keep it at that. You need not repeat the exact words exchanged in the heat of the moment. The fights that you have are not meant to become a talking point among your friends. Also, their memories might last longer than yours, and even if you move on from that fight, they might not. It just creates unnecessary tension. Plus, they might form a lop-sided opinion about him, based just on a fight.

The details of your sex lifeWhatever you do is between you and your partner. Remember the ‘Princess Leia and the gold bikini’ fantasy from the sitcom Friends? Sharing the intimate things that you indulge in, in bed with a friend might fuel your friends’ imagination on perhaps pulling your leg on it later, or worse still, mention something unwittingly in your partner’s presence, making the situation all the more awkward. Better keep it under covers!

Confidential discussionsEvery couple has discussions in private, away from the world, since that’s how they are intended. Always keep in mind that if you disclose these conversations, you are breaking the trust your SO placed in you. Think of the reversal, and how you would react if he went and blabbered to his friends. If you expect him to respect your privacy as a couple, you ought to, too.

Things you dislike about his familyIt doesn’t matter who the family member is, it’s best to discuss the problem with your SO if you want a solution. Telling your friends will only widen the rift between you and his family, since your friends will most likely want to protect you and feel the other person is at fault. Besides, your friends are hardly likely to know his family members. Your partner would be able to provide a perspective on why someone said something or what that person’s backstory is.His insecuritiesNo way are you talking about these. Whether they are financial insecurities or in bed, keep them to yourself, or visit an expert with your partner. Telling your friends isn’t going to lead to any better path. Talk to him about it instead, and figure out how you can help. Even if it is a failure in a past relationship, you ought to keep it to yourself.