But remember this, comrades: there can be no queer revolution without bikesexual revolution! So come pedal with us in Copenhagen, this Wednesday night at Råhuset, Onkel Dannys Plads 7, probably around 20.00. Just before the sex party, to which we are sure your bicycle is welcome.

July 24, 2011

One of the greatest parts of traveling and inspiring people to view transportation and sexuality in a new light is the the art that is created when a community really takes the message to heart. For example this reinterpretation on a classic, the Bicycle Playin' Card

July 23, 2011

We take up a lot of space on this blog talking about ourselves, our plans for the future, and generaly how awesome we are (we're so awesome!). And usually no one ever talks back to us (except for the comment thread on our Malmo post, which we heartily recommend you review). It's just us, talking and talking. But we don't like that. We want to hear what the common people think. Well, the common people have finally spoken. In Swedish, but nonetheless, thanks to the comments section of our news appearance in the Sydsvenskan newspaper, we now have a precise composite picture (vie Google Translate) of what the people think of us and the bike porn project;

Those who want to see these people do porn have to be very sick- King

Would be interesting to see what the "jones" is going on behind the four walls. Or wait a minute ... Believe it is reflected in these bizarre lust you can think freely from the internet.- apan_som_styr_skutan

There are no monkeys in Sveige därmemot a Bernadotte and another variant of that, and so you yourself of course. The monkeys from the zoo.- Black Coffee

I wonder if Mitt Möllan gets its business wholly or partly funded by Swedish taxpayers' money. "Cultural subsidies." I would probably really do not know, because I think the answer would be disheartening.- SRZ

Well, it must be tender to have sex with a bike, you've certainly heard the joke about the nun who rode without a saddle. Well, they're just so happy, they make of course no harm.- Reds TV

Bicycles who have sex ?????What are they for? SEXTASY.Ride on !!!!! Do not forget your helmet.- aroma2011

Mums;have wet dreams about my red Crescent- volcano man

Have always wondered how the new bikes are made!? Thanks!- Peter Peppe Gullstrand

July 21, 2011

Behold, the Blitzkrieg of bike perversion on Sweden has begun! We woke up to a big steaming slice of Swedish fame and glory this morning:

This article from South Swedish Daily might sound like good fluffy news with quotes like, "bringing positive sex culture to the bikers and bike culture to the perverts," and, "there may be vegetables," but it also does a great job bringing up our ethics:

We help communities define obscenity for themselves

We protect our artist's privacy

We don't sell DVDs, it is only shown for a community audience

We don't even have screeners for the media. Thus Its not too often that media is able to do us right. But damn, how they do it in South Sweden.

July 19, 2011

This special message from Bike Porn Industries International is being recorded for broadcast somewhere in the middle of the Baltic Sea, aboard Bike Smut Sea HQ. Bike Smut's neon gang of sprightly pornographers has bounded aboard a naval vessel of massive proportions, and commandeered it with effortless bike porn style and grace. From our floating command ship, we are plotting what may be our most daring mission yet: an amphibious porno raid on the quiet seaside Swedish city of Malmo.

The Bike Smut Skindinavian Expeditionary Force musters on deck with two motorcycle mercenaries.

We are currently stealthily approaching the unsuspecting coast of Sweden, cruising within sight of the wind farms of Denmark. Under cover of midnight darkness, we will disembark from Bike Smut Sea HQ and seize the harbor with our amphibious bicycle assault force. It will be exactly like when Guevara and the Castro brothers landed the Granma on the Cuba shore at the beginning of the revolution in 1956, but this time with porn and a tall bike.

Castro rolls into Havana with bicycle corps.

Our expeditionary force will establish a secure field headquarters in Malmo, from where we will survey the field of war, gird our loins and prepare for the final battle, for the culminating conquest, for the bike porn Armageddon of Malmo:

Thursday July 21 8 pm

Galleria Leonard, Mitt Möllan

Entrance from 7 pm

Entrance fee 50 SEK or 30 SEK for students and unemployed (beer included!)

DJs, films and bike pimping etc during the day

"Bike against sexism", bare as you dare bike mob at aprox 10 pm through town aiming for GALLERIA LOYAL where the party continues.

July 16, 2011

Wow! That was, by many accounts, the most successful European show ever! Was it our new, interlaced videos and performances? Was it the locals demand for more joyful, liberating art? We may never know, but we are pretty excited just the same, thank you!

Three shows in three days would be too much for most pornographers, but thankfully our thighs are used to the strain and chaffing. Plus the local bike-folk have taken it upon themselves to design up some images for us. Thanks!

July 15, 2011

One of the great things about many of the European countries we have been through is that private property is frequently disrespected in the most exciting ways. The many squats and occupied spaces provide us with ideal locations for public screenings of bicycle pornography. And so we salute those brave squat pioneers who have seized for us the Gängerviertel in Hamburg, Autonomes Zentrum in Cologne, and all other free spaces that have welcomed Bike Smut.

So we now rush boldy into the arms of the denizens of Hamburg - the Hamburgers? Or, the Hamburg, to be more correct in German grammar? Wikipedia is abuzz with the controversy of what to call these meaty citizens! But what we know is that the squatters at Gängerviertel who have craftily stolen that huge hoard of private property can only be one kind of people - Hamburglars:

July 14, 2011

Tonight, Bike Smut rides again, across the Rhine and through the cold windy streets of Cologne! Critical Mass kicks off in half an hour at 17.30 from Rudolfplatz, and from there we pedal our erogenous zones around the city to the occupied Autonomes Zentrum for a bike porn screening in their luxurious cinema room.

July 11, 2011

Commuting to work inside a building has never been more... uncomfortable?

Behold the strange world of interoffice bikesexual politics:

Does selling jeans mean you can't use your hands to signal your turns? And if they are so fashon forward why can't they build sunglasses into some fucking helmets??!!?? Bicycle Jesus knows you betta keep your protection at the ready.

They should be complimented for at least having some male chest in the video, but why is there so little diversity in handlebars? Straight or drop seem like the only two options, and they would all look way more comfortable if they would learn to sit up and beg.

July 9, 2011

Faithful monogamy is at the very heart of a designed and purposeful order – as conveyed by Jewish and Christian Scripture, by Classical Philosophers, by Natural Law, and by the American Founders – upon which our concepts of Creator-endowed human rights, racial justice and gender equality all depend.

Election season is somehow already beginning back in the Bike Smut homeland of the USA, and this means POLITICIANS. Politicians who firmly believe that the only way to improve the world and fix the ills of society is to use the violent power of the state to force all people to conform to arbitrary and impossible moral codes.

And thus we now have the first bold anti-porn attack of the election season: Michelle Bachmann and Rick Santorum, right-wing candidates for the Republican presidential nomination, have made a solemn pledge to ban pornography if elected president. The two politicians were the first to sign the 'The Marriage Vow', quoted above, a pledge which requires that its adherents recognize that married people have better sex, that the greatness of America depends on its women having as many babies as possible, and that homosexuality is a dangerous disease. And of course, that the only way to 'protect' women is to save them from the sight of pornography:

Humane protection of women and the innocent fruit of conjugal intimacy – our next generation of American children – from human trafficking, sexual slavery, seduction into promiscuity, and all forms of pornography and prostitution, infanticide, abortion and other types of coercion or stolen innocence.

Poetically put, Religious Right.

As pornographers ourselves, we are well aware that we are different from baby killers and slave runners. The stupidity of these anti-porn politicians is obvious enough that it needs no discussion. The one question we have to answer, as insurgent bikesexuals, is, when politicians try to take control of our sexuality, how can we fight back? How can we resist? Make your own porn! Only by creating our own sexuality can we prevent politicians from ever taking control of it.

LONG LIVE BIKE SMUT - DEATH TO THE INNOCENT FRUIT OF CONJUGAL INTIMACY!

July 3, 2011

Berlin is big. Berlin is crazy. Berlin has porn. Bike Smut is ready. We've been waiting for this moment ever since we left Berlin the first time back in mid-April without being able to do a show there. Since then Bike Smut has exploded across the eastern reaches of the European continent, and is now fully set to re-engage Berlin and its multitudes of sexiness.

Bike Smut's first hit of Berlin on July 7 is organized by porn comrades from the queer feminist porno mag Bend Over and Too Much Pussy. Our show will feature the queer electro chic band Scream Club, and a set by DJ Juan of a Kind. How can you find the Bike Smut show on July 7? It's really very simple - follow the fancy dress bike ride from Hermannplatz to the King Kong Klub (Brunnenstr. 173). The show begins at 22.00, more details about the fancy dress ride will be added in the near future. Tickets to King Kong Bike Smut will be 3 Euros.

Following a day-long nap, Bike Smut takes another lap around the porno velodrome at Schwelle 7, Berlin's center for the mystical pursuit of 'experimental body work and body research.' We will be pedalling there on Saturday, July 9 at 21.00.

Bike Smut is...

At first you may not see the connections between sex and cycling. Some are attracted to the sleek designs, some champion the liberation of women, (eg how bikes put pants on women) while others think bikers are hot and want to fuck them.

We can help.

Our program of short, DIY bike pornography is specially designed to provide you the tools to meet, converse and potentially reach orgasm with bikers in your area!

We endorse:

joyful exploration,

shameless flirtation,

and radical honesty.

Movies are a powerful medium, but even more impressive is what creative ideas come from a community gathering to appreciate the cause of better sex and better transportation! Workshops, dance parties, lectures and discussion groups, potlucks, craft nights, naked/underwear bike rides, and more take part in bettering your community by helping to define obscenity for yourself...