Read: Da Man Dem

In ‘We Are Family‘, Troy decided to invite his friends over for dinner to reconnect. . .

I’d spent all day tidying up my flat in preparation for the arrival of my two best friends

Justin and Martin.

If I’m honest, I’ve never mastered the art of cooking. The preparation, seasoning, and timings were all too complicated, and took way too long. So, my neighbour Claudia gave me some jollof rice, cassava patties, kenkey and sardines, to serve up.

The food’s aroma had started to waft through the flat. I hunted around for some air freshener but couldn’t find any! In the end, I sprayed the room with my Estee Launder ‘Intuition’ aftershave.

The smell immediately reminded me of my ex-boyfriend Alex, who had bought me my first bottle as a present.

Even though it’s been three years since we split up, I still think about him.

I know it’s a cliché but certain songs on the radio or a film that we’d watched together or any mention of Barbados, triggered powerful memories. Barbados was our very first holiday together, and Alex was the first guy that ever meant anything.

I remember (in every detail) the first time we had sex. He did things to me that I’d never done before. Afterwards, while lying in his arms he stared into my eyes and said:

“You do realise I’m deep into you” to which I replied “let’s just go slow” to which he replied “don’t do that, you’re gonna make me fall in love with you”. And that was it ‘BOOM!’

I fell, and was all up in it!

But then he broke my heart, and not only broke it but wrapped it in barbed wire, and squeezed! It’s amazing how humans can switch from longing to see someone, to longing to stab them every time you see them?

Martin skyped me first thing this morning to ask what we were going to discuss? Is it about the US elections he asked? The race is over I said. “Over? Things are just beginning! The Americans have picked the lesser of two evils, and the country’s divided” he growled! He was passionate about his politics, and could drop it deep when he was ready. I deflected the conversation by reminding him of the time Obama was first elected. The three of us ended up getting ‘high’ at a house party in Hackney. Neither of us could remember whose party it was or how we got there?

He finished the skype session by saying he would send me a link of Michelle Obama on Carpool Karaoke.

Justin text an hour later to ask why I was calling a meeting? “Is it about Brexit? I don’t want to get caught up in one of you and Martin’s political debates”,

“Could be” I teased.

“Anyways, I want a hard Brexit” He burst out laughing. Justin’s laugh was infectious and his humour full of innuendo. He rambled something about a dancer he fancied called Pietro, who he hoped wouldn’t have to be deported back to Rome because of Brexit.

I sighed, Justin always had a crush on someone. If it wasn’t a guy in Sainsbury’s it was a barman, if it wasn’t a barman it was the new choreographer, if it wasn’t the new choreographer, it was a postman!

Martin was much more secretive about his men. Justin said it was because he was a Scorpio. Whenever you asked Martin about ‘da man dem’ he would just smile like a sphinx. He could say a lot by saying nothing and conducted his sex life with the same organised efficiency that he did in his IT work.

Justin’s sex life, on the other hand, was much more chaotic. His relationships were often messy, and drawn out over long periods of drama. Martin said it was because he was a Gemini.

They have both been in relationships with different guys but neither of them seemed to get hung up on them. Well, not in the way that I was over Alex.

I heard my door bell, and knew it was Martin, Justin never arrives anywhere on time.

I was excited about us all meeting up again.

One of my planned topics of discussion was to ask them why they thought three attractive, intelligent, black gay men like us; were all single?

Troy Blackout

Troy doesn’t have a recent thumbnail because:

A) He’s wanted in seven states

B) He looks like Quasi-modo

C) He’s shy

D) He’s an aspiring writer who prefers to be invisible so that he can people watch