A community where individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder, and their supporters/allies, can come together to offer encouragement to those with BPD, education, and effort to eliminate the stigma of BPD. If instead you are seeking support for yourself as someone involved with a person with BPD, or someone who has experienced borderline abuse, please visit /r/BPDlovedones

What is SOFFA?

SOFFA is a term borrowed from the transgender community. Adjusting for our purposes, Urban Dictionary has defined SOFFA as, "Acronym that stands for Significant Others, Friends, Family and Allies of those with Borderline Personality Disorder. SOFFAs generally take on the role of providing comfort and support to BPD loved ones. SOFFAs act as an important link between non-BPD and BPD persons. "

This space is intended as a discussion between those with a BPD diagnosis, and those who would like to offer support to those who have a BPD diagnosis. We would like to keep a positive focus on encouragement and support towards recovery for those with a BPD diagnosis.

This represents a marked change in focus, and a repurposing of this community more in line with the original reason for it's creation.

We have split into two communities. /r/BPDlovedones is a safe space whose priority and focus is on the needs, feelings, confusion, and experiences of loved ones specifically, rather than on the individual with the diagnosis. If you are looking for support and encouragement for yourself in what you have experienced with a person with BPD, or a safe space to discuss your experience being abused, please visit us at /r/BPDlovedones.

I've had to put down some pretty hard no lying rules, she was at the point of being an almost compulsive lyer to me. for almost a year the though was in my head "i love her, but i should not believe anything she says ." of course given i loved her i failed to take this advice and believed all sorts of stuff that she told me.

Normally, i would catch her out on her lies, and since putting my foot down (after her having a cyber affair, hospitalisation, diagnosis,dbt etc) the lies seem to have stopped.

im ok with her making mistakes as long as she tells me about them. if i find out things other than by her telling me and they are big, it is divorce court time. and she knows this.