Dirty Gerty's Hurdy Gurdy

GERTYHURDYGURDY

Only the poem knows what's true

Monday, May 16, 2011

A poem, dedicated to Bunbury

I realize it's been quite some time, since I've posted. I'll admit I have been in horrific states. But, this morning, circa 5 am, I woke, looked out a window, and saw my dogwood tree, full bloom. White blossoms, illuminating the shadows that foregrounded it. And, of course, this image incited me to write a poem, which I am dedicating to Bunbury:

DOGWOOD TREE

Your white flowers exemplify shadow,Reaching towards me from the bushesWho are green but seem of deepest black,To break from night and take the daylight back.

But you, a haven of phosphoric blue,Dotting the sky when night is most profoundHelped lost sailors hope, when none was found,Blossomed, to be rooted, from tip to ground.

The rain falls, in a small swell of petals,It breaks against those shores that are distantAnd yet, so close, the earth and the ash,Your flowers bob, and petals clash.

Better than gloaming, grooming the past,To move into a future, and wear its capeBlacker than the night sky, your escape,Of rain, wiping tears, from the wind’s cry.

Putting its sorrow back in the earth,The sorrow that a farrow cow won’t feelBut embodies, to ever dream of a new calf,Is nothing, if not, that dreaming lasts.

Your white flowers recede into daylight,And I mourn that their light must passUnless another night comes, another dawn,But when air gives root, my dreams, are gone.

*Expect some ramblings, reader(s)?, from me in the upcoming weeks. I have not vanished. Baudelaire wrote, in relation to genius the public is like a slow running clock. (This was in an essay on E. Delacroix). I've been thinking how true this is, particularly in contemporaneity. I'd never declare myself a genius, I am not one, however, it seems the aristocratic population is diminishing. We must work to sustain the blood line! C'est Moi? The Jewel of the NIL!*

About Me

I have an MA in English/Lit. I adore writing, the blood life, and am presently working on my poetry. I've written two novels and a novella, but have never attempted publishing them. Because they no longer feel honest to me. I should say. I've also been living with systemic lupus, with the diagnosis, since I was 19. When I turned 25, I was diagnosed with nephritis, a serious complication of lupus involving the kidneys. My kidneys have crescents and irreversible scarring. Yet, after chemo, prednisone, more chemo/immunotherapy CellCept...Myfortic (now) , I can say I am trying to keep myself stable. Needless to say, I do value life and beauty, which I define as the interconnectedness of nothing. Should you desire more, about me, message me.