Protecting the Land of the Free…

A nine-year-old boy’s dream trip to Disney World was ruined when US immigration officials ruled he was a threat.Civil servants Kathy and Edward Francis planned to surprise their grandson Micah Strachan with the holiday of a lifetime to Florida in February.…But this week US Embassy officials denied the schoolboy a visa to enter the US.They said there was a risk he would not leave the US at the end of his holiday and refused his application under Section 214 (b) of the Immigration and Nationality Act.

English, motherfuckers. Do you speak it?

… the US Embassy’s rejection letter to Micah said: “Because you either did not demonstrate strong ties outside the United States or were not able to demonstrate that your intended activities in the US would be consistent with the visa status, you are ineligible.”

Look, he’s a nine year old who wants to go see a six foot rat, and while I can understand there might be some confusion over the issue of his holding an RSA passport when he’s lived in Britain his whole life, I repeat: he’s nine. Just ignore the fact that he doesn’t pronounce it “Suth Efrica” and doesn’t look like this:

What the hell do you think he’s going to do? Lose the olds at the airport before hijacking a Bob The Builder ride-on toy to the nearest state line and going underground? Seriously, fellas, you are not protecting anything, least of all your reputations, when you deny a child entry to visit a tourist resort for, well, children and claim it’s because you don’t understand why he wants to come. I mean what next, kicking American children off planes? Oh, hang on, that’s actually happened, hasn’t it?

:Sigh: Okay, read carefully now.

tourist |ˈtoŏrist|noun1 a person who is traveling or visiting a place for pleasure : the pyramids have drawn tourists to Egypt.2 short for tourist class .verb [ intrans. ] raretravel as a tourist : American families touristing abroad.

terrorist |ˈterərist|nouna person who uses terrorism in the pursuit of political aims.

Got it?

And poor little Micah? Well, he’s got a rich and (in)famous ally speaking up for him.

Tessa Jowell, Labour MP for Dulwich and West Norwood, said: “I was very concerned to learn about the situation facing my constituents and of course understand the distress the decision has caused.“I have asked the American authorities to look again at this and very much hope they will feel able to reconsider their decision.”

Unfortunately I suspect the American authorities will take sit up and take notice of this for a maximum of zero seconds since she’s also no longer in government and as useful as one of these.

My advice, Micah, for what it’s worth? The Yanks, or at least their immigration service. don’t want you or your grandparents’ money so vote with your feet. Go to Euro-Disney instead.