Windows Update Facts

Aesop originally wanted to write his fable as “The Hare and Windows Update” instead of “The Hare and the Tortoise” but could not figure out how the hare will ever lose to Windows Update, even despite him not taking the race seriously.

By the time it takes Windows Update to download a 22 MB update without installing it, Mageia Linux’s urpmi was already able to download and install a game whose package is 900 MB (and there was still a lot of time to spare).

Only three things are infinite: the universe, human stupidity, and the amount of patience that Windows Update requires.

Windows Update does not take forever to finish updating your computer. It takes at least forever and two weeks.

Ten measures of slowness went down to the world. Windows Update required at least eleven, so more had to be provided.

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