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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Top Ten: Questions I Am Too Embarrassed To Ask

10. To someone in the military: “You ever kill a child?”
9. To anyone: “What is with that foot cramp during or after sex?”
8. To a Mexican: “Does your food give you diarrhea as well?”
7. To certain gay guys: “Why do you talk like that?”
6. To a gay woman: “[When] were you raped?”
5. To a cop: “What is the statute of limitations on drug trafficking?”
4. To everyone I slept with: “How often were you faking it?”
3. To people I run into from high school: “Wow, did you gain weight?”
2. To a blind person: “How do you know when you’re done wiping?”
1. To women with a large belly: “When are you due?”

9 comments:

I pointed out to my wife earlier today that I think they nurture that voice until they get it right. I don't think the biology of homosexuality, if there is such a thing, even carries over to the voice.

Therefore, I think the gay voice is considered sexy or cool or something to other homosexuals, so some homosexuals fake it.

I find the fact that they build their own voice to be a bit disingenuous, so it bothers me. Other than that, though, I kind of like it.

Actually, I find that most gay guys who speak in that stereotypical gay-guy manner tend to be southerners who fled the south to move to a city. I say this based on the fact that when I moved to the south, I thought half the guys I met down here were gay, then I realized... a lot of southern men sound very effeminate, especially men from Louisiana and Georgia.

I once arrested a gal with a pot-belly, so as I was sitting her in my patrol car I asked if she was pregnant. "what? You think I be pregnit?". Uhhh, no maam, I just have to ask every woman that question, actually.