I have had issues with drinking enough water lately, and sticking to my healthy diet of fiber and Whole Foods. Work has been tough, and lunch is a “treat” not a “right” in this environment.

After a stressful day at work, the ride home I realized I had drank half a bottle of water all day. I had not shit in 2 days and felt a storm coming. The welcoming pain and feeling of a giant blob of feces was in my lower intestine as I walked up my apartment steps and unlocked the door. Immediately I ran to the bathroom. The moment I sat, no bowl movements.

I’m now in a panic. For my body, 2-3 days of no bowel movements causes issues in my upper tract- nausea, acid reflux, bloating, unreleasable gas. I needed something fast acting. Stool softener? Too long to work and unpredictable. Oral laxative? May work in an hour or may work tomorrow, during the most important work meeting of my career. No.

The quick fix, no BS trick= Suppository laxatives. Just insert in the Anus, and movement comes within 3-15 minutes and is over once the suppository exits your ass with the piles of shit behind it. The stimulant in the laxative causes liquids to form in the intestines and lubricates for an easier push...

So I use the suppository and after becoming red in the face and tensing all muscles as a giant football came out of my ass, I felt pain... when I wiped, the bulge was felt. I now have a hemroid at 27yo? Wtf?

I start researching the best ways to relieve the swelling: Prep H pads and Prep-H suppositories. The answer was already in my house!

I went to the cabinet to grab the suppository for easier relief next time. The package says, in different terms, “clean your ass well, with wipes or towels, before using”

Hmmm. I don’t want to use a towel... that’s gross... Prep H pads! Those are clean and have aloe and are used by many as standard “wet wipes”. I grab the package and notice it had not been sealed, and the towels were mostly dry. What do I do? Wet them!! Get them soaked with water and that will help clean!

When I finished cleaning, I inserted the Prep-H suppository. Relief! The pain and swelling went down, I was able to pass gas. Life was great....

...for 10 minutes.

After wiping with more Prep-H pads after the fact, I stood up. Suddenly my knees are becoming warm. Likely from sitting on the toilet too long, it’s happened. But they aren’t numb, they are hurting. Suddenly, my knees are on fire and I can’t bend them.

I look down, and every vein from my torso down was BULGING as if I had turned into the Hulk. My throat started to close and anxiety hit. My heart started to hurt and panic set in. “Call 911”. That’s all I remember, though I was conscious after I asked someone to call.

Here I am in the hospital. Confused overall. Did I have a reaction? Was it not a hemroid but a bigger issue?

No. Placing water on the Prep-H pads had released 100x (made up) of the chemicals prescribed on not only one, but 5 wipes. With opiates and od’s in the news, it can be compared to crushing a pill to cause a faster, higher rush but with consequences.... The active ingredient meant for my ass, causing constriction in the targeted blood vessel, had soaked down my legs to all veins. Blood was now stuck in my legs and unable to easily pass through my body as normal. The suppository? It made the reaction dramatically worse, with medication being delivered continuously after insertion and during the reaction.

TL;DR

Right now, I am waiting to be released from the hospital for Overdosing, on Prep-H pads. The soaking of dried wipes with chemicals meant to affect blood vessels in specific areas, had seeped down my legs and put me at sudden risk for a heart attack (worst case scenario, and not likely unless another condition contributes. I’m okay, my ass is not. My ego, gone...

No. Placing water on the Prep-H pads had released 100x (made up) of the chemicals prescribed in one wipe. The active ingredient meant for my ass, causing dilation in the targeted blood vessel, had soaked down my legs to all veins. Blood was now stuck in my legs and unable to easily pass through my body as normal. The suppository? It made the reaction dramatically worse, with medication being delivered continuously after insertion and during the reaction.

Right now, I am waiting to be released from the hospital for Overdosing, on Prep-H pads. The soaking of dried wipes, meant for one area of the body, had seeped down my legs and put me at sudden risk for a hear attack.

The quick fix, no BS trick= Suppository laxatives. Just insert in the Anus, and movement comes within 3-15 minutes and is over once the suppository exists your ass with the piles of shit behind it. The stimulant in the laxative causes liquids to form in the intestines and lubricates for an easier push...

So I use the suppository and after becoming red in the face and tensing all muscles as a giant football cane out of my ass, I felt pain... when I wiped, the bulge was felt. I now have a hemroid at 27yo? Wtf?

Okay, so I will reply to this one... since it’s deep in the comments...

When I mention vessels below my waist... my dick was BULGING. I mean not just hard but the girth was unreal- reminded me of a friend that took viagra once... but using it was the last thing on my mind.

The Four Hour Rule was also setting in, but from anxiety it’d only been 5 minutes..

When I mention vessels below my waist... my dick was BULGING. I mean not just hard but the girth was unreal- reminded me of taking viagra once at 23yo. I was too scared to try anything (sexually, tho my body wanted to), tho I was on the fence...

When I mention vessels below my waist... my dick was BULGING. I mean not just hard but the girth was unreal- reminded me of taking viagra once at 23yo. I was too scared to try anything, tho I was on the fence...

It’s funny you say that it’s the last thing on your mind... sex was the LAST thing on my mind... being honest here, but I still felt this almost primal desire to cum. Like I almost felt as if I needed to, but then I thought of all the muscles that would tense more upon climax... wish I would have for the story haha

It was an internal struggle in every piece of me, physically and psychologically.

If or when I decide to get another I'll probably spring for one with a heated water option, I got this to kind of test it out without sinking a bunch of money into it, but it is absolutely worth it. The cold water actually isn't bad, it's very soothing when you have issues, just don't crank it to full blast.

I mean, you can if you want. But you can wash your butt with a cloth anywhere there’s soap and running water.

I’m not saying walk around with a shit crusted asshole to get to a sink. I’m assuming people will at least wipe the shit off their asses with toilet paper before going at it with a wet cloth if they don’t have a bidet.

I wish bidets were common in North America. I used one in Northern Ireland and it was just absolutely superior. I honestly don't know why we even have our toilets in the same room as our bathtub other than the obvious architectural reasons. I've always felt like it should be divided into an actual bathroom where all you do is bathe and brush your teeth and stuff and then have an actual wall between that place and the place where you shit.

The chemicals in prep h constrict muscles when wiping the actual area needed... so applying to other muscles can have the same affect, but not one that is wanted, especially when wetting 5 towels, releasing some powerful chemicals.

Embarrassing solutions either way imho. You can go to a pharmacy and get some over the counter stuff, which is super soothing and reduces inflammation. The branded stuff in supermarkets near me is called Anusol, so makes it pretty conspicuous as to what you're buying. Although if say if they are bad and causing a lot of pain (especially if you work in a job where you sit for long periods) I'd say it's worth powering through the embarrassment and going to the docs. I had to do it when OTC medicine wasn't working and the prescription stuff he gave was much stronger, worked a treat!

Awe man, can be embarrassing. I eventually had to go to the doc go get perscripption stuff but there's things you can try first.

Get preparation h. There are different kinds, it gets confusing. You will be embarrassed by the suppositories but those work really well.

Get tucks or make your own. You can get Witchazel at the pharmacy and cotton disks. Use that every time you wipe, at the end, to make sure you cleaned fully. You can also use these wipes in between medication if you're irritated. They cool and stop the itching for a while.

If all goes well, it'll feel better right away, but can take a week or two to go away. If you are getting worse or bleeding, I say suck it up and see the doc. They'll prescribe Anusol, and it'll clear you up pretty quick. That will be an uncomfortable appointment, but remember. They've seen worse.

To prevent them in the future, stay regular, maybe up your fibre. Stay hydrated. Don't push at the toilet. Consider getting a foot stool for the toilet or a Squatty Potty type thing.

I mean, really, if you can’t laugh at this, come on. Sorry, OP. But thanks for this amazing story. Also: your work sucks re: lunch/water. I used to have one of those jobs. After this incident it would probably be pretty easy to get a doc to write you a note that says for med reasons you have to be allowed to carry at minimum whatever the amount of ozs are in a Nalgene water bottle.

Under investigation for it, but not formally diagnosed yet (my pain consultant changed a while back and I went from a very good consultant to one who managed to write a prescription so wrong that the pharmacy wouldn't fill it).

Best of luck with your diagnosis hunt! I have an endoscopy and colonoscopy in two days to check for celiac disease or another gastric condition that is causing nutritional deficiencies and exacerbating my pain. It's not fun lol! Fingers crossed they figure it out.

Did you find any relief from pregabalin? I had a terrible reaction to cymbalta (duloxetine) and my doc wanted to start me on pregabalin but after spending the night in the hospital with a heart rate of nearly 300 and uncontrollable shaking with the duloxetine, I’m hesitant to take anything beyond ibuprofen. Even more so because even though I have a fibro diagnosis, I’m fairly certain my pain is from EDS. The rheumatologist who saw me didn’t do any hypermobility tests and basically ruled out RA and sent me on my way with the fibro diagnosis and a suggestion that I might want to try smoking weed.

From my understanding, GABA drugs can be effective for nerve pain, but if mine is caused by joint instability and muscle overuse, they likely won’t be effective. Anyways just wondering if you’ve found pregabalin effective at all and if you’ve had any bothersome side effects.

I'm in the same boat as you (likely connective tissue disorder, but diagnosed fibro/SPN/narcolepsy). Lyrica makes me feel like a million bucks. It does have some of the worst, if not the worst, withdrawals of any drug, though.

I use it for neuro pain. It's fairly effective for a non narcotic. I've known a few people that have taken it also and only one of them couldn't deal with the initial side effects. I second BLC's mention of horrible withdrawals. My insurance changed prescription requirements at the beginning of the year (just had to change pill dosage so less total pills). It took a week to get straightened out and by the third day I was contacting friends to borrow meds. Felt like a junkie but I was definitely going through withdrawals.

Thankfully I only ever had withdrawal from Citalopram, and only mildly (basically, brain shocks). Other than that, I can't think of a single tablet I've ever taken for anything which I got a side effect from.

I never thought I would say this, but thanks. Thanks for calling me a troll. Thanks for endorsing incest. Thanks for being a triggered little liberal bitch. No matter what you do or say to me WE HAVE A NEW SCOTUS........!

phenylephrine is a vessel contrictor. It also has witchhazel sometimes, and always in the wipes. It's sort of a time honored remedy that has some pretty potent antinflamtory and hemostatic properties. So it can cause blood clots in high doses.

It's witchhazel. It's sort of a time honored remedy that has some pretty potent antinflamtory and hemostatic properties. So it can cause blood clots in high doses.

Work has been tough, and lunch is a “treat” not a “right” in this environment.

That's sad to hear. Are there no laws to prevent "authority pressure" of meal breaks wherever you live? I'm pretty sure there are laws that hold employers responsible if they chose to pressure you out of lunch.

u/pot88888888s , it is a violation, but sometimes the pressure and even self drive is a factor over management actually not allowing lunches. An hour lunch is an hour of time I could be making commissions... just being honest, I know it’s not right to choose work over health. I’m not falling victim to blaming management for overworking myself for my own gain...

Yeah, but they should enforce the breaks. Just saying. To protect their workers.

When managing, I didnt care if someone I was responsible for wanted to work through their break or lunch. It's their right to have breaks. They're gonna get it, just like they're gonna get their pay check. It's owed. It's been negotiated. I kept track because it was MY job TO keep track.

Not only that, the measly breaks that do exist are there to help keep everyone safe and provide a chance to do personal things without the pressure of having to ask when they really need it.

Because, surprise, the pressure will always be there and there will always be more work, more people who need something. They can wait for you.

And employees are humans first.

From kitchen/food industry work to work in the medical field, Ive seen people compromise personal safety to accomplish tasks. I've worked more than I should, and seen others do it. But that behavior leads to burn out, depression, and mistakes.

As someone in charge of a team, you realize quick you might win the battle, but you're going to lose the war every single time.

Harness that drive and feed it. Ambition is very valuable. Dont let the ambition drive you.

Breaks!! Breaks for all!! Then let's kick some ass. Or save it. You know.

Edit: and yikes, so glad you made it through such a nightmare surreal experience. I stand here today warned of the hazards that are to come.

Another perspective is, would you trust someone to take care of something for you if they won't take care of themselves?

Being self-sacrificing is a put off if it doesn't make sense. Also can be a put off just because you can see that behavior is going to lead to a critical failure. Why align with failure?

Sadly in some cases its low self worth. In which case, please take the break and learn that you are okay. You are just as valuable as your peers and will be more effective if you dont waste your energy jumping over hurdles that no one else may ever see. You're okay, everything you feel is okay, and it will get easier. The break will become normal, and you will gain stability.

Hope you're clocking out and leaving, with ample time accounted for, which you are reimbursed for in growing rates until the end of clocks.

sadly not all places are like that. I am in a will to work state meaning no guaranteed lunch/breaks there just has to be the "opportunity" for example my old job. There was queue to go to lunch. so when you started your shift you signed into the queue. They had about 700 employees and allowed ~15 people on lunch ~ 5 on break at a time. So basically you clocked in, and prayed that you got high enough on the list to take your break before your shift ended. That was until they added the "token" system. basically if you were at your desk logged in before your shift started every day,and were never late at all from the day the system was implemented you were at 100 points. you got 1 token each day while at 100 points which could instantly trigger your lunch/break. The problem is this was a scale, and if you were even 1 second late coming back from lunch/break or logging in for the day. your "points" were lowered and you no longer got tokens. I had my points lowered for being 12 seconds late on a lunch break. And i did not get an opportunity to raise the points to give me more tokens. So i worked a full year and took 3-5 lunch breaks.

They also used metrics which had nothing to do with your ability or performance. I was the most profitable agent the company had (because this was a visible statistic for the entire company) for almost 2 years straight and trained many of the companies top agents. But was getting passed for promotions based on metrics that had nothing to do with my ability and purely were based on the randomness of the tickets i received.

How horrific. I am so sympathetic, it takes a lot to survive in such bleak conditions. It makes sense they wouldn't recognize someone worthwhile, the state of their business shows how little organization or logic went into their system.

I hope you have found a place that treats you well, and allows you to influence the growth of the company. You sound like the exact type of person who would be the life blood of a group, and I would be honored to be working along side you.

I hope some day human societies will abandon this dehumanizing capitalist system that destroys lives unapologetically. There is enough love, food, water, shelter in the world. More than enough. The problem is all bureaucratic and zero logistic.

Honestly I was young and didnt value myself enough. I am now working in the same field but making about 3x the salary I was making there. Still plenty of room to grow and learn. But it was a toxic enviroment that has ruined a lot of peoples views on humanity lol definitely a soul sucking place.

I don’t understand how in a country that is supposed to be a world leader there are still people being treated like it’s the 1800’s again at work. Why does America seem to think that corporations are so much more important than basic human necessities?

Omg that sounds horrific, hope they got in major shit for doing that. This is horrific, may I ask where you worked and who you worked for? Not anything specific but just a general sense of where this is happening.

They basically had the thought that since you were work-at-home there was 0 excuse for being even a second late, and if you called in sick it was considered a no-call no-show unless you had a doctors note... Company gives 0 shits about its employees.

I have a friend who constantly didn't take her breaks for the same reason. She could take her breaks whenever so usually when a manager asked she'd lie and say she'd taken it already. Management seemed to think her an amazing worker as she did the same work in less time, while truly just working illegally for free. It ended up with her getting a promotion.

It frustrated me to no end because she basically stole that promotion from someone deserving it more, just because she was willing to break the law. I get it from all sides involved but it infuriated me to no end.

That's asking for lawsuits, though. Even in "at will" states, there's wrongful termination, and heavy fines for not being in compliance with state and federally mandated employee protection laws (like OSHA). They're really not guidelines, they're mandatory. Most of the places that get away with violations are a mishap away from losing their whole business.

Haha that cake symbol took me by surprise. Haven’t been on Reddit in quite some time. Tried posting this yesterday but the rules were so strict, and butthole hurting, so I drafted it (new on the app update?! Sweet!)

OMG I needed this laugh but Jm so sorry for you! I’m 9 months pregnant with my first baby and have developed horrible hemorrhoids! They are awful so I can relate! Will remember not to make these mistakes!

Anyone that has Prep-H pads sitting around is a person who needs a bidet! You can get them super cheap (starting at like $30 on Amazon) and they just connect to the toilet. You will never suffer a hemorrhoid again once you purchase an ass-blaster! You can gently cleanse the butthole with a gentle spray or go all out and squirt a blast of water right up in there (like a mini enema). It's life-changing. Glad you're ok OP. That sounds like quite a day.

Correct, phenylephrine is a vasoconstrictor, not vasodilator as OP says. Overall, I'm pretty skeptical of the whole story, as there is minimal to no systemic absorption after application to the rectum. Also, there's an absolute 0% chance that "Placing water on the Prep-H pads had released 100x (made up) of the chemicals prescribed in one wipe."
Perhaps OP had an adverse reaction to the phenylephrine itself, but it was definitely at a therapeutic dose.

I agree. Hemorrhoids exist because of dilated vessels.. Phenylephrine isn’t going to further dilate. That’s why it’s used for treating hemorrhoids- to shrink them. I wonder if maybe OP vagaled out because of all the rectal stimulation and decided to twist the story into something more outlandish for karma.

As a medical professional, I agree with your clinical assessment. He/she has a large stool load, heavy pushing and straining, sitting on toilet and stimulating anus with wipes. Lots of canal tone. Then passed out. The active ingredient in prep h does the opposite of what OP is claiming. It’s a vasoconstrictor. Possibly did see lots of vasodilation in other vessels due to vagal effect.

Edit: just saw your username. Suspect you are a medical professional as well;)

"The active ingredient meant for my ass, causing dilation in the targeted blood vessel, had soaked down my legs to all veins. Blood was now stuck in my legs and unable to easily pass through my body as normal. "

A few things that I tell my patients: first, the obvious get enough hydration and fiber in your diet, meaning plant foods. Specifically, prunes have actually been studied against I think metamucil quite favorably and I recommend at least 3 prunes daily - they really aren't bad, and I think can help. Of course, you could use a stool softener as well.

Now the less obvious stuff - get a squatty potty and a bidet. The squatty potty helps to basically orient the human body into the more natural position that it's meant to poop in. Modern human Western toilets are kind of barbaric actually from a physiological point of view.

A bidet can be a HUGE difference maker for people with hemorrhoids. First of all, it's much better at cleaning. Think of it like this - if you went and ate ribs at a steak house, would you rather vigorously go wash your hands in the bathroom or wipe them with a dry paper towel? Which would be a better cleaner?

This is even more so because hemorrhoids lead to folds, which make them hard to clean because the poop gets stuck between the folds. So you wipe even more, which of course is very irritating and overall makes everything worse.

For like $30-40 you can get a bidet attachment that is easy to install (maybe 15 minutes) and you basically flip the switch, shift your weight a bit to get it all clean, and then dab dry. That's it. No more irritation from wiping, no more itching from not getting all of the nooks and crannies, etc.

For people that use bidets, the thought of not using bidets is ... perhaps almost horrifying in how backwards it is. I almost guarantee that anyone that switches to one will not want to poop anywhere else.

Generally, no, other than discomfort. I suppose theoretically I might hypothesize that you're getting a sort of chronic low-grade bacterial exposure to your system which might just take some resources physiologically, but I'd consider that fairly minor in general.

With that said, if you don't have a bidet, I don't think you'd regret it and you'd probably wish you'd done it earlier.

Man, I have to admit that reading this as an adult (26) made me feel really bad for you, but I know if I had read this as a teenager I would have probably been howling from laughter...

That being said, try taking a Magnesium supplement every day! It’s weird, but it helps you become more regular and digest your food. I’m not sure of the science (and tbh I didn’t even know your body needed Magnesium until the end of last year) but my mom told me to try it and I’ve felt a lot better. I normally have a pretty sensitive stomach that gets upset super easily and I hate the bathroom aftermath, but I find if I take the Magnesium supplement on a regular basis, that it really calms it down. It doesn’t give me guts of steel or anything, but it helps a bunch.

as a kid, I had terrible issues with bowel movements, due to my parents having zero knowledge on diet/exercise and just fed me garbage and cheap "fiber" bars that still kept me constipated for 7+ days. As a kid in the early 2000s, I kinda just went with the flow, and never really self researched.

After making a switch to whole foods, I can't recommend RIPE banana's and laying off meat/dairy for a few days during a cleanse enough.

As a kid, I was told that banana's are a food that gives you constipation. (By a LITERAL doctor) Later, Iv'e noticed hearing different things from different people. Which later, I found out it depends on when you eat them.(ripened or, Unripend) Wait until there are fully loaded with black spots, not just a few.

A smoothie with a couple ripe bad boys, kale and some other stuff with a LOAD of water. (Usually I fill the blender entirely with water, mix in with really ripe banana's and sorted fruit/veggies)

And damn, it fix'd everything. I don't even need effort, the bowel just slides on its own in seconds.

it was nice to actually never have bowel issues again. Though, I'm not a medical doctor so please take my advice lightly.

As a kid, It was actually a crazy traumatizing thing, I would go weeks without bowel movements and trips to the doctor/hospital. While my parents still just fed me milk/cheese to try to help the issue....

I dont blame them, but damn early 2000s was rough... doctors really couldn't give 3 shits about your kid and would 100% recommend over the counter drugs/stool softeners(Metamucil) over food recommendations (oh, and prune juice lmao, like that did anything)

real ripe fruit is the key. (in high doses, Just dont go over your caloric daily needs). You'll be amazed at what 2-3 days on RIPE bananas, kale, unseasoned potatoes, lentils can do.

Im aware this is all anecdotal, But Iv'e lived with terrible bowl issues for YEARS. as a kid until 18-19. It was an actual blessing to fix.

If you have any questions, feel free to pm. People always feed awkward talking about bowel movements, but was my life a living hell during those years.

Going from sometimes 5-7+ days of constipation into a painful stool that made me lightheaded that took upwards of 30-60 mins to deal with, to a 10 seconds (faster than my pee sessions) Stool that flows out with ease was a literal Life changer.

it was nice to actually never have bowl issues again. Though, I'm not a medical doctor so please take my advice lightly.

As a kid, It was actually a crazy traumatizing thing, I would go weeks without bowl movements and trips to the doctor/hospital. While my parents still just fed me milk/cheese to try to help the issue....

If you have any questions, feel free to pm. People always feed awkward talking about bowl movements, but was my life a living hell during those years.

as a kid, I had terrible issues with bowl movements, due to my parents having zero knowledge on diet/exercise and just fed me garbage and cheap "fiber" bars that still kept me constipated for 7+ days. As a kid in the early 2000s, I kinda just went with the flow, and never really self researched.

And damn, it fix'd everything. I don't even need effort, the bowl just slides on its own in seconds.

Bowel movement issues as a teenager are terrible and confusing and embarrassing as fuck. I've only been truly constipated once in my life when I was 16 (28 now). I'll never forget that day because I had spent 2 hours trying to shit and everything was stuck at the worst possible point. I was sitting there bawling because everything was so ungodly painful. So I called my mom and she told me I needed an enema. I had to walk 5 blocks to the drug store to pick one up. I'll never forget the look of pure pity that cashier gave me when I hobbled into the store, bawling, trying to ask where the enemas were. I'm walking home still in tears reading the instructions thinking "what the actual fuck!". Every step was so painful I thought I was going to die.

I get home and lay down on the floor like the instructions show and am laughing and crying at the same time. It's not like I had ever even considered shoving anything up my ass before. God damn those things work incredibly fast. The relief when I finally hit the toilet was so fucking incredible I cried tears of pure joy for at least 10 minutes.

Last year my dog was severely constipated and every time I took her outside to try I would start crying and going through some weird ptsd episode. I can't imagine having to deal with constipation on a regular basis.

To be fair, doctors did recommend bananas for diarrhea. It's the amount you eat. They'd order a BRAT diet, (Bananas, Rice, Applesauce, Toast) for diarrhea or upset stomach. Bananas give you a lot of nutrients but are easy to digest, so they're a common recommendation. It leads to a lot of people thinking they're good for stopping the diarrhea, or leading to constipation, but they don't recommend the BRAT diet much any more, it's not nutritionally complete and can swing the other way too.

You said I now have a hemorrhoid at 27, making the presumption that this was your first hemorrhoid. Why would you have Prep H wipes and Prep H suppositories if you've never had hemorrhoids before. Am I the only one who noticed this?

Careful with the shit bro, the more you strain the more of a chance you will get diverticulosis or diverticulitis. It's perforations or pockets in the colon that can be painful. In the west, about 25% have them over 45. In Asia, not many at all.

Yeah, but see, the part about you having constipation is completely unnecessary. You could've just started when you went looking for the preparation h, and gone from there. I think you just wanted to make it more humiliating, because I guess that makes a better TIFU.

Yep, like I said it is a pretty long post about shit... but it is a lot easier to write about a personal experience and get caught up in the funny details when Reddit is a place for entertainment. No shame... only around my choices in question ha

Jeez I wish you could be my patient haha, oh man that would have been hysterical to read your file firsthand. The complete randomness and absurdity is what makes this so good. I would gild you gold but I'm broke.

Both of us... but it’s different for everyone and diets. Some are healthy and only go 1-2 a week, others 3 times a day. Depends on the diet and metabolism. The best way to know if you’re broken, is using the stool chart. You want it to be a nice soft but shaped turd. Not a solid brick, not too liquified, not a bunch of pebbles...

Dudddeee I know... works like a charm, but I became dependent... then moved to short stint of chewing tobacco, not my favorite, then now a Juul really works... so coffee and Stims will make me feel like I have to go, but the dehydration is what killed me...

I overdosed on benadryl once. Lost my memory from the point where I took the Benadryl on I think Saturday, and came to, cussing blue lightning, in the e.r., with a big old knot on my head, where I apparently faceplanted in my yard, and my neighbor (another doctor) found me and called my husband (also a doctor.)

At that point, I had major spine surgery coming up, and was on a fairly low-dose fentanyl patch, so it's also possible that the Benadryl and fentanyl didn't play nice together.

The er doctor was convinced I had tried to commit suicide. By Benadryl.

Let me emphasize this. I was on fentanyl patch, took benadryl because I had a horrible sinus headache, went out of my gourd, and the er doctor had three different psychiatrists come to my room, trying to find one to say what he wanted to hear. They apparently all told him to get fucked.

When I was explaining to my daughter about this, she said, "What a moron! That doctor is soooooo stupid! If you had wanted to commit suicide, you could have just eaten your box of pain patches! Duh!"

Which I had said to the doctor myself, in much more colorful language.

I am so damn glad to be off fentanyl. I hated that shit. It made me sleepy all the time, and I was terrified a patch would fall off me and stick to one of the kids, or get eaten by one of the dogs.

Oh man, this was just fascinating. I didn't realize the active ingredient in preparation H was phenylephrine. What a horrific chemical for an accidental overdose, and you absorbed it rectally so you might as well have injected it. You're lucky to be alive OP. This is hilarious but horrifying, kind of like when you hear about heroin addicts who haven't shit in a week because they've been abusing immodium which in massive doses can cause a very weak opioid high.

Haha it’s funny you say that. I didn’t have stomach issues much until a few years ago. I just thought pepto was for everything... right? Nope... unless you plan on not going to the bathroom for a day or two and get a black tongue (it’s gross and common for Peptobisnsbsbsbnal , look it up...)

Sort of similar thing happened to me this morning. I took a natural laxative yesterday in the AM (haritaki) be cautious with its use and completely forgot about it. So I wake up at 6 to get ready for work and I feel incredibly hot, and turn down the heat in the room. Which should have been the first warning. I walk to the restroom and empty all my pee (which felt like forever) and as I stand up I feel incredibly hot and dizzy, and call out to my partner.. that’s all I remember. The next thing I know, I’m on the floor blacked out.

Long story short: I’m feeding myself and taking electrolytes. Be careful with laxatives people.

Meta works, had tons of broccoli for lunch and a fiber-one bar for a snack. The key is drinking enough water for me. It’s so sad to say that I have access and nothing stopping me, I just don’t think about it sometimes...

And extra fiber with less water can just cause more issues, supposedly.

I totally apologize. I don't know what I was thinking. I had a complete /r/thanksimcured moment there, didn't I? Please, do forgive me, I am trying really hard to make sure I'm not like this, but I'm imperfect and still working on it. I also hope fervently that you have relief, as I'm much too familiar with lots of issues below my esophagus.

Oh stop! Are you kidding? Giving advice is accepted and I appreciate it. Someone gave me that advice before and had they not, I would have taken yours. No harm at all, and I’m sorry for making you feel as if I challenged you. Haha

I’m familiar with both sides and I’ve just become smart enough to see that they are connect, in my body. When I get blocked, I am taking Zantac, Prilosec prescription (cheaper!), tums.. only thing that keep me from puking.

But lower issues, i never had an issue above, as if my stomach acid was moving properly, just not my bowels(?) talking out of my ass. (getting tired of puns bu(t)t..)

I’m sorry and I appreciate your time and care. It’s easy to crack a joke, it’s different when you take the time to help someone, especially when advice is harmless (in this case) if I’ve already tried it. But helpful for others.

Cheers haha

Edit: I had liked your comment before I even replied, if that’s proof enough that I appreciated it

1000% agreed and used to help stomach pain, but when using before going to the bathroom, it almost takes any edge off and makes it harder (in my experience). Stomach ache goes away and the feeling to go dissipates

When I’d only smoke earlier in life, no issues. As I get older (not much but I didn’t give exact age...) I need a medication for one thing, it causes constant diarrhea. I take meds to help that, so it blocks up top and I know have gastrointestinal disease... so I’ve take all these meds too...

All because of one. It’s a hilariously scary and serious issue... “I’ll stick with weed” one of these days too, as I figure out what I need and don’t need.

I'm on meds that can cause issues like constipation and have basically been in the exact same predicament- right down to dried out prepH wipes. And, of course, I've turned right to the sink to dampen them. Never knew that there was a suppository or that you could OD on this stuff but that's insane and I now have learned to be more cautious from your story.

It's a youtube channel that is known for crazy titles like "A boy ate 150 gummy vitamins, this is what happened to his bones" where he then goes into incredible detail how people making one dumb decision can lead to a crazy chain of events in their own body, killing (or like in your case, almost killing) themselves

Yep still doesn't make sense. Phenylephrine causes constriction of blood vessels. It makes zero senses for it to cause "pooling of blood in your legs". It literally makes your arteries smaller, decreasing the amount of blood that goes through the periphery. That's how it helps haemorrhoids. It decreases the amount of blood flow to the haemorrhoid, thus decreasing the pain.

So just a reaction? The only thing is that I use them all the time, in the proper area as directed. Never taken literally 5 pipes, held under the sink for seconds, and literally used so much I need to use a towel (something I never admitted in the post). Legit question for your opinion.

You may be trying to challenge me, but I accept it because I want to know what really happened, instead of just being told not to take it anymore because of that reason I mention. But what do butt doctors know?

All I'm saying is that blood "didn't pool in your legs" from the preparation H. This makes no physiological or medical sense. I can't really explain your "symptoms" but the way you describe it doesn't make sense. I very much doubt that you had ANY side effect from absorption of the phenylephrine because it's a tiny amount.

Cheers. I think we’d get along on many things, but this is going nowhere good. I’m just telling what I heard from the doctors and the internet... I’m not a doctor, but pointing out I’m wrong with such direct points, would make me think you’d know more than you’re an idiot, OP

Edit: idk if you’re realizing that I had a handful of this chemical, drenched with water, and cleaning while standing. Enough to need a towel after... it wasn’t a small amount.. if I had socks on they’d have been wet

Wow, I've been in this situation so many times (not being able to poo for a long time and trying anything to make it pass). I now realize things could've gone very different, even more so since I already suffer from heart failure.

The prep-H wipes I've used only have Witch Hazel on them. I've never heard of it causing that kind of reaction but now I'm concerned. Did your wipes have more active ingredients than the Witch Hazel?? Did the doctor tell you which ingredient caused the blood to pool? I use prep H wipes pretty regularly (they are off brand and only have witch hazel on them though). But if witch hazel is what caused it then I will be much more cautious! Really hope you can respond to this!

Not witch hassle! Another active chemical. I’d be lying if I knew which one, but the details of the chems are in the link.

Cheers and don’t worry! Just don’t do what I did... I’ve used prep H a lot before this happened, because I used as intended, only placing the chems on the needed area... not letting run off go down my legs

He would die if this was left untreated, possibly as soon as a couple hours. Too much Phenylephrine can lead to cardiac arrest and it sounds like he had enough in his system to take a straight shot ride up his circulatory system.