"The future looked so bright for tiny Til, a baby rabbit born without ears three weeks ago," Der Spiegel reports. For little Til was born in the east German town of Limbach-Oberfrohna, and Germans are a people known for their love of adorable mutants and pathetic baby animals. Like an earless, 8-year-old Lindsay Lohan from the family Leporidae, Til was destined for stardom.

But then tragedy struck. The microtic-anotic cottontail was crushed to death by a cameraman at her very first press conference.

We are all shocked. During the filming, the cameraman took a step back and trod on the bunny. He was immediately dead, he didn't suffer. It was a direct hit. No one could have foreseen this. Everyone here is upset. The cameraman was distraught.

And so the ruthless paparazzi extinguish another life. Farewell, Til. You lived your life like a candle in the east German wind; which is to say, not for very long.