~ a little chit chat just like on my diary

weird moment

It’s a weird moment when you look at the mirror and what you see is a stranger

A few days a go. I kinda experience it. Honestly, it’s scary! 😆

So, I was at the bathroom, it’s a habit of mine to sing while washing my hair, staring to a small mirror to make sure did I got every part of my hair clean.

For those who don’t know, my eyes are dark brown, as dark as my hair, but not that dark to be called black. At that moment, when I look at the mirror, suddenly I feel scared. I was thinking: “what on earth?”. I think I just see someone else at the mirror. Someone who have the same face like mine, the same ears like mane, the same lips like mine, the same skin like mine, almost the same at everything! EXCEPT the eyes color. Maybe because the mirror got a bit blurry, so I see it wrong. So i take a second, a third look, I SWEAR that girl’s eyes color are black! Really black!

Ahaha, I know I know! Maybe I’m just imagining things. Now that I recall about that night, I just realize how silly I am for being scared. Actually I always have this kind of phobia that makes me hate mirror. Some feminine side of me cure it, since I love to dress up. But I won’t lie to say that I am not afraid of that thing anymore.

It takes me 3 years at college before deciding to buy a huge mirror rather that a small one which is easier to hide. So, you know, I’m quite confident that I am not really affected by that delusion of mine anymore. But tada! That’s weird moment happen! Hello stranger at the mirror!

Anyway, it’s not the first time I experience it. (Just so you know). I love drawing since forever, even when I know I don’t have that much of talent. So there was once when I was small, I want to draw my self. Since at the moment I don’t have any portrait that good enough, I decided to sit in front of the mirror and draw the one I see right in front of me. But. I stop before I draw the eyes.

So, I always start with drawing the eyes first. That’s just my style. Eyes – nose – eyebrow – lips -face – ear- hair and then neck. Got it? To picture something perfectly I tend to focus my sight at the object. And there’s nothing wrong with the me at the mirror’s world. Just the fact that I am scared of her eyes!

So I kinda wondering. I used to see this soft gaze at her eyes. I used to see this smile at her lips. Frizzy and curly hair, but friendly. Somehow I never look at the mirror when I am mad. Did my eyes always that scary? There was a friend of mine who said that my eyes look scary when I was thinking or being so serious and focus about something. So I tend to try not to be so serious all the time. Even though I have this serious personality.

And, so I say. There’s time when my eyes are scary. And it’s not something new. But I can never get used to it. It feels like looking to someone, a twins of mine who has a different eyes. And she is scary when she’s not smiling. Even me, I am scared of her. So let’s loosen up shall we? 😉