comp dot dsp guy

A few months ago someone requested new lyrics to the song “American Pie” with a comp.dsp twist. Ever since then, I wanted to take a crack at it, but never had the time.

Well, I finally made some time, so here it is. I hope you enjoy it! The lyrics to the real song can be found here.

With apologies to Don McLean, and with no further adieu…”

A long, long time ago
I can still remember how that USENET used to make me smile
And I knew that if I were able
That I could make that filter stable
And maybe it’d be bandpass for a while

But limit cycles made me shiver
A delta input made it quiver
Bad news on the o’scope
I didn’t know if I could cope

I can’t remember if I was wise
When I read about finite word size
But I was seeking sage replies
I asked… comp dsp guys.

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

Did you write a book like Rick?
And can you donate some clever trick?
If the guru asks for one?
Do you believe in GPL?
Do you boycott Bill Gates? Intel?
And can you teach me how to code for fun?

Well I know that you’ve got more to say
And you’re just as sharp as rb-j
You’re both fixed-point guru’s
Man I dig those rants of=g2’s!

He was an engineer stuck in the lab
With a quick connection and the “gift” of gab
But I knew he would take a stab
I’d ask… comp dsp guys

My filter’s ringin’

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

My filter’s ringin’

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

Now 4 2 years – and no zxform
And r u any1 2 mourn?
But that’s not the way it used 2B
Then “are assembly programmers goin’ extinct?”
And the VSIP threads, well – in they slinked
And that troll, his endless posts they really stinked

Oh and when Kusuma told him “please pipe down!”
He tried to steal his cap and gown
“I’m going to tell your dean!”
Man that e-bob sure is mean!

And while Griffin wrote another rant
Old e-bob topped his list with Grant
Proving he had less brains than a plant
just ask – comp dsp guys

My filter’s ringin’

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

Filter, filter, way outta kilter
Could it be the way I built ‘er?
eight days late and slippin’ ‘way
You think I need a Sharc array?
Or put it in an FPGA?
If you have troubles, just ask Ray
All the lurkers on the sidelines – reading Clay

Now those half-band filters – sweetly tuned
Those zero-valued samples pruned
His ASCII art will amaze ya’
Check out that long-haired Lasse!

A shifted pitch you want to hack?
Then you should look at Sprenger’s FAQ
Should you pass pointer on the stack?
just ask – comp dsp guys.

It started ringing!

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

Oh there we all were all in one place
With poles and zeroes in complex space
With no time left on his exam
So come on! what’s the answer? tell me quick!
Cold cash, it’s yours! You’re a “vocal clique”
’cause cheating is that student’s way to cram

Lasse, Jerry, rb-j
Rick, Grant, Doc Mike, and Peter K
No expert on the list
could pop that e-bob cyst!
And as the flames were posted in the night
They swamped the net with a noisy blight
I saw e-bob still thought he was right
just ask – comp dsp guys

He was stingin’

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie
Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie

(song slows down here)

Do virgins ever visit bars?
What’s MMX to do with cars?
Guess we don’t always post ’bout code…
I surfed on down to our friend Bores
Where I’d read the answers once before
But my browser said the web page wouldn’t load

And in the labs the speakers screamed
Our bosses cried, one coder dreamed
Of autobuffers sighted
Elias Howe was cited

The professors we admire most
Blackman, harris, Parks, we toast
I’ve still got time for one more post
I’ll ask – comp dsp guys

And they were singin’

Why? Why? comp dot dsp guys
Traded Hamming for a Hanning
’cause the lobes were too high
There’s too much noise to let the signal get by
Singin’ Oppenheim and Schafer don’t lie