You know the drill. This one introduces an explicit "dad" angle, in case your Kevin Clash heebie-jeebies were getting complacent. Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The plaintiff, identified only as S.M. and then referred to as John Doe throughout the suit, alleges that he met Clash in Miami Beach in late 1995 or early 1996 and the puppeteer befriended him, after which the two stayed in contact when Clash returned to his home in New York.

The suit contends that Clash, over the phone, enticed John Doe to visit him with promises of a plane ticket, cash and a place to stay, as well as the promise of "being a 'dad' to him."

When the plaintiff ultimately visited Clash in early 1996, the suit continues, he and the now-52-year-old Clash "had sexual contact on multiple occasions," including sodomy and oral sex, in the older man's apartment. John claims that he didn't know Clash was the voice of Elmo until he visited him in New York.

Today in just-got-something-in-my-eyeball news, Jack Osbourne is excited about his first Christmas with baby daughter Pearl:

"Yeah, it's pretty cool," Osbourne told us at Spike TV's Video Game Awards in L.A. "The house is decorated to the nines."

"We have two Christmas trees," Stelly added with a smile. "Not one, but two! One fake, one real."

...The happy couple says their Christmas celebration will involve "a lot of family and a lot of food," but they may go easy when it comes to overwhelming little Pearl with tons of presents.

"She has so many as it is, so it's not going to really make or break her," he said. "I mean, she's not going to have any trauma at this stage if we don't completely shower her with gifts."

I feel like I shouldn't like them, but I just really really like them. Maybe it's my affection for Kelly's hair. And also because Jack looks like Baby Peter Jackson and it makes me think of hobbit Christmas. [E!]

Apparently Lindsay Lohan hornswoggled the show Million Dollar Decorators to million-dollar-decorate her Bev Hills mansion, and then scampered off like a horny little Rumplestiltskin with hella free rugs and lamps and shit.

Sources close to Lindsay tell us she agreed to film the segment for the show earlier this year — and in exchange, the people behind MDD spent $200,000 on expensive furniture and other trappings for her house ... which Lindsay's now renting for $8,000 a month.

We're told Lindsay was initially cooperative — filming a furniture shopping segment back in March and spending several more days shooting in the home before the renovations.

The show then went to work on the house — filming the entire renovation process — but when it came time to shoot the big reveal in April, Lindsay stopped returning their calls.

DOOOOOOOD, LOHAN. I get that you are a troubled lady with hella problems, but if you want me to be sympathetic you need to stop being a GIANT THROBBING MEGADICK all the time. [TMZ]

I DO NOT LIKE THIS HEADLINE ONE BIT: "Martin Freeman Continues to be Unfunny- Jokingly Calls Lucy Liu a Dog." But I'm at a cafe with no headphones so I can't watch the video to get the context. Is Martin Freeman a dick? EITHER WAY JUST TELL ME NO. [ONTD]

For $15 million you can live next door to Britney Spears and poop in Wayne Gretzky's toilet. [E!]

Here's Padma Lakshmi having the time of her fucking life in a blue bikini. [Radar]