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Dear Abby: I have been dating my boyfriend, “Jose,” for a year. Before that, we
were friends for five years. Ever since I’ve known him, he and his half sister, “Blanca,” have
danced together at parties. We’re all in our mid-20s.

They dance salsa, merengue and other styles of music together. I used to think it was cute, but,
now that Jose and I are a couple, I find it annoying and a little creepy. He says Blanca loves to
dance and can’t always find good partners.

She gets mad when he dances with me instead of her during her favorite songs. I told Jose he can
dance only with me at the parties or only with her — not both. I don’t want to share him, and,
honestly, people joke that it’s incestuous.

How can I make him understand how much this bothers me? What can I say to his half sister when
she gives me the evil eye? My relationship with her is friendly, but it was better before I started
dating Jose.

— Takes Only Two To Tango

Dear Takes Only Two: If you want to hang onto Jose, simmer down and be less
heavy-handed. Dictating with whom he can dance makes you seem jealous, controlling and
insecure.

Because he and Blanca have danced together for so long, it’s understandable that she expects to
dance with him.

My advice is to be gracious and hold onto your temper because, if you don’t, your relationship
with Blanca will no longer be friendly and it could cost you your boyfriend.

Dear Abby: My family is having a Thanksgiving conundrum. My uncle and his wife
have offered to host the holiday. My uncle hesitated about having it because he recently lost his
job.

My grandmother decided that each couple should chip in $50 to pay for the dinner. (The total
amount will be $300.) We will all contribute dishes, too. Their children aren’t being asked to
pay.

My grandmother thinks this is a good idea because it would cost us more than $50 to go out to
dinner for Thanksgiving, but some of us think it’s odd that we’re being charged to attend a family
dinner.

No one else in the family is able or willing to host, so the only other option would be going to
a restaurant. Any thoughts?

— Turkey Troubles in Philadelphia

Dear Turkey Troubles: Just this: Pay up! And, while you’re offering thanks at the
dinner table, be grateful that the person in need of financial help this holiday season isn’t
you.