Work is cut out to keep kids abuse free

April is Child Abuse Prevention Awareness Month. According To Rush Russell, executive director of Prevent Child Abuse NJ, there were 9,000 confirmed cases of child abuse in New Jersey in 2013, about 25 children per day.

Alarming as that is, the number of actual New Jersey victims is closer to 100 children per day.

Clearly, we have our work cut out for us to keep our children safe.

Children are more at-risk for abuse at home than any other place, including day care centers, schools or youth organizations. Approximately 90 percent of adults who abuse children are known to the children they abuse.

While most parents do a good job of warning children to keep away from strangers, parents need to inform children that trusted adults hurt kids too. Parents must tell their children that they cannot keep the abuse a secret, even if they “promised” to do so or if the perpetrator is a beloved family member.

There are many good programs for parents who abuse or who are at-risk for becoming abusive. Most abusive parents do their best as parents, given what they know about parenting and their own childhood experiences. But effective parenting programs can provide important information and teach safe ways of raising children. Additional information can be obtained from Prevent Child Abuse NJ and the NJ Department of Children and Families.

In a Trenton Times op-ed essay, Russell referred to a recent study of 17,000 adults in which, “The research found that significant stress that occurs during a child’s first 18 years has a profound and long-lasting impact on their overall life expectancy, chronic health conditions, the likelihood that they will become involved in drugs, alcohol and crime, their success in marriage and relationships and even their risk of suicide.”

Russell adds, “Further research has confirmed that children who have experienced the most serious stress fill our prisons, emergency rooms, mental health and substance abuse clinics and unemployment rolls.”

We can keep children safe by offering help to parents and children and by seeking help for ourselves and family members.

PARENTING WITH PETE by Peter Herbst, MSW, LCSW, runs every other Thursday in The Jersey Journal. Have a question? Email him at pete_herbst@comcast.net. Comment at http://www.nj.com/parenting-with-pete/.