07/06/2012

It says in the Daily Star that Jessie J has "done a Gaga". Well, that could mean anything, from wearing a silly hat to having a dress made out of meat. By the way, with so many UK celebs going vegetarian I think I'll start making dresses out of Quorn. There's an untapped market. You'll see me on Dragon's Den.

I read on, and apparently Jessie has done the same toilet trick backstage. Jessie J has admitted that she pees in a cup. That should land her a sponsorship deal with Coca Cola. And it takes a certain confidence to go to the loo in a cup and have faith that no one will walk in on you. I guess she's an optimist. She sees the cup is half-full of piss.

Peeing in a cup is pretty gross, but the best bit of the story is what Lady Gaga does. She has said she uses bucket when she is on tour.

Jessie uses a cup, Gaga a bucket? Just how much does Lady Gaga drink? But fair play to Gaga, at least no one will walk into her changing room and accidentally drink from a full bucket. "I didn't know you were a real ale fan, Jessie... *gulp*!"

As a man I should count myself lucky. I have never had to pee in a cup, as I've been able to go in a bottle. In case you were wondering, it was a Volvic bottle. Wider neck. You know what I'm saying, ladies.

Jessie said: "When you are in a changing room that is 15 minutes away from the toilet and you have six changes of clothes and press interviews, you have to master the weeing in a cup situation."