Big Boy Sues Blagojevich for Copyright Infringement

Chicago, IL- There seems to be no end in sight to Ilinois govenor Rod Blagojevich legal woes.

In addition to charges that Gov. Blagojevich attempted to auction off Barak Obama's vacant senate seat and accusations of shaking down a variety of charities, it was announced today that Govenor Blagojevich is being sued for copyright infringement.

The plaintiff is Big Boy, the owner of the famous chain of diners.

Big Boy has accused Blagojevich of stealing the hairstyle and various other well known traits of Kip, the mascot of the Big Boy diners.

Harlan Oinkers, the official spokesperson of Big Boy made this statement at the time the lawsuit against Blagojevich was announced:

"Everyone associated with Big Boy, from the CEO down to Manuelito, the busboy in diner #254 just outside Boise can see the uncanny resemblance between our wholesome mascot, Kip and Blagojevich. Since Kip was here first, before Blagojevich was even born it's obvious he stole Kip's persona. There's no other explanation."

Oinkers went on to say, "Big Boy diners are a slice of Americana. Who doesn't remember going on cross country road trips and seeing the 40 foot Kip the Big Boy eyesore dwarfing the diner?

"Kip is a restaurant icon, right up there with Ronald McDonald and Wendy. We at Big Boy certainly don't want an asshole like Blagojevich associated with Kip. Business has already dropped off 11% since the Blagojevich scandal. It's a marketing nightmare."

When Blagojevich's legal team was asked for a statement concerning Big Boy's lawsuit, they refused to acknowledge it as a serious problem.

"When was the last time anyone ever saw a Big Boy diner?" asks Julius Roklophick, Esq.

"My client, Govenor Blagojevich has modeled his political persona after Robert Kennedy. Can't you tell?"

More on this story as it develops.

Make Madame Bitters's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

Following a tireless debate last night, congress has begun work drafting a new bill that seeks to stop white men from kicking the back of a goddamn coon's head and shattering his teeth whilst proclaiming the sanctity of the white bloodline.
The bi...

BILLINGSGATE POST: In a stunning development, Chief Justice John Roberts changed his name to Caitlyn Roberts, thereby joining Justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan as custodians of keys to the women's restroom of the Supreme C...

Washington - The President of the United Snakes of America and a Brit Reality TV con artist famous for faking the Beeb's wildlife documentaries have appeared in a televised White House junk science rant.
Barack Obama and ageing UK naturalist (sic...

Washington, DC - Disgraced NAACP leader, Rachel Dolezal, who was fired last month for being a secret whitey, didn't take long to get her life heading in a newish direction. It turns out that she quickly found an equally-minded friend in John Boehner,...

Washington, D.C - How do you cap off a Democratic Presidency that seems to have gotten almost nothing done for nearly eight long years? Well, a good way to start is to gather all the whack job liberals you can find after a really gruesome, racially m...

Malone, NY - New York Police shot and killed one of the two escaped murderers from the Clinton Correctional Facility, Richard Matt, on Friday, only a few miles from the Canadian border - which would have surely been the end of the trail for all polic...

No longer willing to ignore the stark reality of environmental degradation, global poverty, and deteriorating human health, pessimistic beverage packing company Canned Dreams, Inc., recently announced the launch of a new product line, known as the al...

In a clever political maneuver all 32 republican presidential prospects agreed to consolidate their collective power and run as one single multi-personality candidate.
The new strategy is the brainchild of Carl Rove who said it was necessary to a...