Do Men Need Love To Be Complete?

Everyone knows that one guy — you know the type — who always has to be in a relationship. Just when his pals are stretching out in satisfaction because the last girlfriend is gone, he brings in a new honey who, he assures everyone, is really the love of his life this time. Every relationship he gets involved in absorbs all of his time, and makes him slightly less fun to hang out with.

But at the same time, he is enviable. The ones who struggle to find fulfilling relationships wish they had his ease with serious dating and constant mission in search of love. But despite the yearning on the part of his buddies, they may be better off than Mr. Lover Man. Why? Because single guys have the chance to come to an important realization: You don't necessarily need love to lead a complete and fulfilling life.

Though I'm not advocating a big, self-inflating ego expansion here, I am suggesting that you assess your sense of self in terms of your own tastes and preferences and ignore, for a moment, whether or not you have a lady to wake up to every morning. A lot of guys think that to live without a girlfriend is not living — but they forget about themselves. So think about yourself: What do girlfriends never let you do? What part of yourself gets hindered when you're in a relationship? It's time to unleash these parts.

find the little guy inside

Altogether, you need to feel complete on your own. Before that last breakup, before the week in Miami, before the magical first autumn — really, before you even began noticing girls — you were an individual with the sole responsibility for your entire state of being. Don't try to convince yourself that this has really changed in a substantial way.

If you feel that there is something missing in your life, don't lunge for a romantic opportunity to fill the void. In fact, don't assume there is even a void when there may not be. That nagging sense that something is missing might just be a disguised urge to go to a sports bar and watch boxing.

Oftentimes, men seek shelter in relationships in order to feel complete. For some guys, it really is the only thing that rounds out their existence. But more often than not, the girlfriend is little more than the provider of a false sense of security. Johnny may think, "Oh, everything is fine now, I have a girlfriend," when in reality he has slowly been losing touch with his friends, largely because of his dating commitments. Will he ever notice this pattern? Probably not; unless he changes his ways.

In short, rebounding may not be the best way to react to a breakup, especially if it's the second or third (or more) in a long line of rebounds. First and foremost, try to remember yourself, and ask yourself this: How much have I done and what do I really want to do?