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You made it! Here it is... the blog where you get to sit back and laugh at - or be completely horrified by - life with 5 kids, 2 parents, some frogs, a cat & a rabbit (and those are just the creatures we know about).

1.26.2013

Considering the fact that I have 87 5 kids (and we don't live in a ginormous palace), they get along remarkably well. Until they don't. Inevitably, when I make a phone call or close the bathroom door, some fight will break out. The more important the phone call, the stupider the fight will be. I suppose, when the oldest is only 9, we can't really have serious issues to argue about. But, I'm convinced my kids fight about the most inane things just to mess with me. They're trying to make me lose my mind. Then they can just sit me in a rocking chair in the corner while they trash the house and eat gummy worms for breakfast. But, I digress...Here are some of our latest arguments:

Sean used the toilet. Charlotte barged in because she wanted to flush for him. Apparently, flushing the toilet is great excitement, because all I heard was ear-splitting screams coming from the bathroom while they both had their hands on the handle to the toilet. I had to break it up by not letting either of them flush and doing it myself. They both ended up in tears. I bet the Mayans didn't predict the end of the world would start in my bathroom.

I'd like you to dust off my Mother of the Year award for this one. I'll start with how it ended. Me (shouting): "Just shut up and work it out!" Patrick and Lucy were screaming at me outside the bathroom door (there I go, again, thinking I can pee in peace). What were they screaming about, you ask? Apparently, Patrick kept moving his seat away from Lucy at the table. All the while, taking the plate of bacon with him. All I could hear was, "He keeps sitting near the bacon." "But, I want to be near the bacon!!!!" Can you blame me for telling them to shut up? Or suggesting that one of the two geniuses get another plate for the bacon?

Sean and Charlotte also had a screaming match over who got to plug the charger into my computer. It becomes some kind of weird stand-off where they just stare at each other and scream. So far, the neighbors haven't called the cops. I guess I can't count on them if disaster ever strikes. They'll just assume it's my kids.

Sophie was crying because Patrick made her Mii ugly on his 3DS. Of course, being a typical big brother, he enjoyed this immensely. Her Mii is hysterically ugly, but I can't laugh because I'm supposed to be the grown-up here.

I'm pretty sure this resembles Guy Fieri more than Sophie.

Please tell me I'm not the only one whose kids fight over the stupidest stuff. Leave a comment below to share your stories. I'll read them from my rocking chair in the corner when my mind is finally gone.

1.18.2013

So I've made it all the way to Whole 30, Day 16. As long as you don't count last week's Patriots game. I've done really well - minus those 2 beers and key lime pie. Those were definitely not Whole 30 approved (in my defense, it's the playoffs!). The next day I was feeling guilty (and a little sick), but some good peeps reminded me that it was just a little slip and I didn't have to start all over. Maybe I'll just add an extra day at the end?
So, I definitely cheated last weekend. But, I had a little triumph yesterday, too. On Thursdays, my friend, Erika, and I share a pizza. Her husband gets us a barbecue chicken pizza with pineapple every Thursday. It's the highlight of my workweek lunches. Erika still brings the pizza, but I donate my slices to anyone else who happens by while we're eating because I just can't eat that right now - as much as I might want to. Yesterday, I was having a crappy day and I didn't think my lunch was going to be enough. I thought I might just have to throw in the towel and eat a piece of pizza. (Have I mentioned that I really miss cheese?) I was about to do it when another coworker told me not to. "It's just not worth it," she said. So I sat there and ate an apple and grumbled about it the whole time. I make a lovely dining companion. Later, though, I thanked that friend because I was so proud of myself for eating an apple instead of pizza. I would've felt terrible if I cheated twice in one week!
In the meantime, I have to be better at finding some new recipes this week. I'm getting a little bored with my meals. It's time to mix it up a little.
As it stands, I lost another 2.1 lbs in my second week. (I'm totally breaking the "no scale" rule.) That's a total of 9.8 lbs in two weeks. I've almost undone all of the holiday damage I did!

If you have any recipes to share, leave a comment below... I could use some inspiration!

1.16.2013

Here's a tip for you:Know your own strength.I was trying to crack a hard-boiled egg in my car (because it's totally normal to do that). I was at a red light, too, so don't go starting a campaign for laws against egg-cracking while driving. I tapped the egg gently on my center console. Nothing. I tapped it even harder. I tapped it harder still. Not even a crack. So, now I find myself sitting at a red light staring at this bionic egg that won't crack and wonder if someone is playing a prank on me. I held the egg in my hand and squeezed it. And that's when it exploded. Serves me right for eating my hastily prepared, Whole 30 approved breakfast in the car.

Have a tip to share? Or some portable breakfast ideas? Feel free to leave a comment below...

1.10.2013

Oddly enough, I feel really good on Day 8 of my Whole 30. After doing some research before I started this, I was really bracing myself for the worst. I haven't had any insane cravings, I finally stopped waking up with a hangover, and I don't feel quite so tired in the afternoon anymore.

One thing that this experience has made me aware of is how much of my kids' food I unknowingly put in my mouth. Now that my food is restricted, I am super conscious of what I eat. More than once, I've had to stop and take something out of my mouth that I mindlessly put there. Sure, I'll make you some chocolate milk. Then I'll lick the spoon. Let me open those snacks for you. I'll pop a few in my mouth before I hand you the bag. Don't mind me as I reach over and take something off your plate! I didn't even know I was doing it until I caught one of Charlotte's Froot Loops in my mouth and had to spit it out. Who knows how many extra calories I've been eating all these years?

A downside to this diet is that the food is not convenient. I really have to plan my meals ahead of time. If I forget to pack a lunch, I can't just grab something at Dunkin' Donuts or a convenience store on my way to work. I do have to admit to breaking one of the Whole 30 rules. There is a strict policy about not weighing yourself during the 30 days. Too many years of joining (& quitting) Weight Watchers has left me scale obsessed. On a good note, I lost 7.7 lbs in the first week. Granted, I think I gained about 10 lbs between Thanksgiving and New Year's, but it's a start. I know that the weight loss is not the most important reason for doing this, but I'm not going to deny that it made me very happy.What's great about this is that we've cut way down on take-out as a family. Our meals have a lot more vegetables in them, too, which the kids are actually enjoying. Overall, the first 8 days of the Whole 30 have been fine. I had one minor cheat issue on Tuesday. My husband's aunt left a bag of candy for my kids. In it were those teeny tiny Twix Minis. I popped one in my mouth and enjoyed it immensely. I figured, it was so teeny, there wasn't much harm. Until I remembered that I have OCD and have to do everything in multiples of 4. So, I ate 3 more. Other than that, I have been so good sticking to the plan. Just keep the damn tiny chocolates out of my house!Here's to another successful week (and looking for some new recipes)... Wish me luck!

HEY... If you enjoy the blog, why not become a follower? I'm the one who no longer has a sugar hangover. You can also stalk find me on Facebook and Twitter. Like the page and follow me!

**And be sure to visit my Zazzle store. Don't you need a new coffee mug or apron??

1.08.2013

Especially on some random day in January. Do something unexpected. Like bring a Christmas tree to work. Under your car.

This morning, I was rushing to work for an early meeting. On my way, I came to an intersection where the sun was in my eyes and the glare on my windshield was making it impossible to see straight ahead. Luckily, I was taking a left. I checked to make sure there were no cars coming from either direction and took my left. I felt a little bump like I might have hit a small pothole or something, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Then, I noticed a sound coming from under the car. I pulled over and walked around the car, but didn't see anything. I bent down and took a quick peek under the car. That's when I saw a small Christmas tree lodged underneath.

At this point, I didn't even have time to get down on all fours and address my new Christmas decorating issue. So, I jumped back in the car and hoped the tree would conveniently dislodge itself along the way. It did not.

Eventually, I made it to work. I had one panicked moment along the way when my car started to smell like Christmas and I fervently hoped I hadn't ignited the tree. When I got to my parking lot, I got down on my hands & knees and pulled out my tiny tree. Wasn't that nice of me to decorate the employee parking lot on this lovely January day?

Merry Christmas, bitches.

Have a tip to share? Or some post-Christmas decorating tips? Feel free to leave a comment below...

1.05.2013

So, I feel like I've successfully survived these first few days. I've felt full and haven't been going insane with cravings. I do kind of want to raid a chocolate bar factory around 8pm, but, that's my holiday late-night snacking habit catching up with me. I may have cheated a bit by having a few dates (the fruit, not the boyfriend), but I feel like that's a far cry from a king-sized Hershey bar, so I'm okay with it.Every morning I wake up with what feels like a slight hangover (without all the fun partying to explain it away). I'm guessing it's the diet because I've been told the first week of clean eating takes a little getting used to. Adjusting to burning fat instead of sugar and putting my hormones back into whack wreaks a little havoc. I've had lots of good food, too, so that was a nice surprise. I definitely don't feel like I'm starving. I was ridiculously tired most of yesterday afternoon and into the evening. Last night was also supposed to be date night with hubs to go see Les Mis. Luckily, the theater we go to has a Starbucks in it. I bought a venti black coffee to help me stay awake through a 2 1/2 hour movie. I also smuggled my own coconut milk in one of my kids' water bottles (in my purse) for the coffee. I think the old lady sitting next to me was working under the assumption that I was up to no good with my illicit purse milk. I have to say, even though PJ bought a popcorn with all that awesome fake butter deliciousness on it, I didn't even want any. Now, had he bought chocolate to go with it, I might have punched him in the throat, but he was smart kind enough to skip the candy.One nasty side effect I've noticed is all of the dirty dishes. I have done a ton of cooking this week to prepare all of my meals. At one point, I had the dishwasher running, the sink was full, and every pot I owned was dirty. It's definitely more work than grabbing breakfast or lunch on the way to work. On a side note, I've got all kinds of yummy new recipes that even my kids like. Thanks to my sister and my paleo Twitter peeps, I've found a lot of good resources. I even made my own homemade mayonnaise to use in tuna and as a garnish for other things. It tasted so fresh (and I was super proud that it didn't "break" on my first try).So, I feel like this venture into the Whole 30 isn't too terrible as of yet. I know these first two weeks are supposed to be the worst of it, so I'm preparing myself mentally for that. Four days in, I feel ok. I've also logged 2/500 miles in my 500 mile running challenge for the year. Only 498 to go. HA!

1.02.2013

Yeah, yeah, yeah... everyone's writing their resolutions. You're probably already annoyed by hearing about them or busy writing your own. This year, I made my resolutions all about me. I've set a couple of big ones for myself and for some reason, I think I might actually be able to keep them this year. By putting them here on the blog, I feel like it's going to help hold me accountable. Both of my resolutions are health related. I joined a Facebook group started by of one of my Twitter peeps titled #IWouldRun500Miles. It's an open group that anyone can join and their info states: Our goal is to run/walk/crawl 500 miles in 2013. Some people will run more, some less. Choose your own goal and join us!I'm not a hardcore runner, but I feel like I can take this one on. I did the math: 500 miles over 365 days is only 1.37 miles per day. That's not much at all. I can totally do this (that's me talking myself into it, there).The other thing I did was to embark on the Whole 30. It's an eating plan that lasts 30 days in order to reset your body after years of eating processed foods and other junk. My dad lent me his copy of It Starts with Food which was fantastic. It's a little scary when you read what all of these processed foods are doing to our bodies over time.

My sister, Kirsten, has done the Whole 30 once before and is recommitting as of today. I've already called or texted her 4 times (before lunch). I know from her past experience that the next thirty days are going to be challenging, but it's going to be worth it. This is exactly the reset that my body needs. I'm off the pregnancy/nursing roller coaster and ready to take my body back. I've been told by Kirsten and others that the first 7 days can feel pretty crappy, so I may turn to the blog to whine my way through it. I'm going to keep posting my progress because I think it will keep me motivated to stick with it.

I started the day a little worried about my daily dose of coffee. I usually take coffee with milk and artificial sweetener. Neither of those is allowed on this eating plan. This morning, with some trepidation, I added coconut milk to my coffee. Imagine my surprise when I actually thought it was delicious! I was a little shocked that I could enjoy my coffee without milk and Equal. I really loved the coconut milk and didn't need any sweetener. Who knew?

I've made it through breakfast and lunch both enjoying my meals and without feeling hungry. The real challenge for me is usually that stretch in the evening (before dinner snacking and late at night when I eat chocolate). We'll see how I make it through.

So, here I go. Whole 30, Day 1. This evening I'm off to the gym to log the first of my 500 miles. Two lofty goals for my New Year's Resolutions. Wish me luck!

What about you...Did you make any resolutions this year? Leave a comment below. Maybe we can keep each other motivated!

HEY... If you enjoy the blog, why not become a follower? I'm the one who is going to stick to my resolutions. You can also stalk find me on Facebook and Twitter. Like the page and follow me!

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**And be sure to visit my Zazzle store. Don't you need a new coffee mug or apron??