I Side With Her: Stop Sleeping on the Couch

Apr 27, 2010

My boyfriend (of 5 months) falls asleep on the couch most nights watching TV and sometimes ends up there until 4 a.m., then comes to bed only to get up at 6. We are living together. It is so frustrating. He says many men do this.My boyfriend (of 5 months) falls asleep on the couch most nights watching TV and sometimes ends up there until 4 a.m., then comes to bed only to get up at 6. We are living together. It is so frustrating. He says many men do this.—Naomi, Melbourne, FL

Sure, some men do this. They're all single.

Listen, Naomi, there's a problem: Your boyfriend doesn't think you two live together. Rather, he thinks you live with him. So he's going to act the way he did when you weren’t around, and he's not interested in changing the routine just because he has a woman waiting for him in bed. Which is to say: He's a moron.

So, tell him you're not his mother, and you're not setting a bedtime, but part of the reason you moved in was to begin sharing a life together, and his nighttime routine is making you feel more alone. And if he doesn't change, think of it this way: Moving in together is all about testing compatibility, before making the relationship more permanent. He could be telling you all you need to know.

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