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I hang out with a four-year-old and a few other salacious things happen.

Four-year-olds are farkin’ hilarious. If you ever get a chance to hang out with one, you should.

Today, my friend and her son came out to my place for a swim and cheesecake. The swim was absolute bliss, because the temperature was something like 32 today. Uncomfortable.

Anyway, the four-year-old just has so much energy, it’s ridiculous. He gets one idea in his head and he has to do it, regardless of what his mother says. He also has no fear of water. It was actually a nightmare trying to keep him away from the pool, which is way over his head, until we were ready to go in with him.

He then has this thing he likes to do called Run Rabbit. Basically, it’s the song Run Rabbit and he takes a massive run up and jumps into the pool. Also, does anybody remember noodles? They’re like these long foam things that you take in the pool, quite good for flotation. Some of the ones we have, have holes through them and the four-year-old quickly discovered that you can get water in it and then blow one end and aim it at someone. He’s a fast learner. Needless to say, we got wet.

However, after spending only a few minutes in the pool, the four-year-old got quite cold, he is quite scrawny and short for his age, so we had to get out of the pool. Being after Christmas and New Years, there were still a few treats in the cupboard. So I offered him a few biscuits, chocolate among them, and he picks the plain ones – like shortbread. What four-year-old doesn’t go for the chocolate biscuits?

What a weird child.

Anyway, Friend and I took him to his Grandmother’s to stay, so we could hang out a bit more. While she was getting him sorted for an overnight stay, I took to twitter. Massive conversations ensued.

Firstly, I had a dream about twitter people last night. One in particular and that is all I’m going to say here. Got lots of advice from people, still undecided.

But when you start dreaming about people you have never met, maybe it is time for a break? This weekend, I aim to spend less time on twitter. If any at all.

The other conversation that ensued was something that Friend brought up. Why do guys like boobs? They have a purpose to provide milk to babies etc, but what is the fascination that guys have with them?

Needless to say, a lot of people had an opinion. The consensus was that they are, in fact, awesome. But getting down to the specifics, they have been highly sexualised in our culture and it is a sub-conscious thought for most guys.

So ladies, you’re walking down the street, it’s pretty much guaranteed every dude is looking at your chest.

Many people brought up the fact that a nice pair is an indicator of good fertility. So it really does come back to that basic principle that the male sex is looking for the best partner to carry on their seed. Which brings in those, mostly, African cultures. Boobs are not sexualised at all. They are milk tankers and nothing else. In these cultures, they are also lacking in bras, so they tend to sag quickly and are not “nice” like ours.

WHAT A FASCINATING CONVERSATION. THANKS TWITTER.

So after dropping off the four-year-old, friend and I did a mish to the supermarket, where we had a few “hot boy” moments. There was one stocking the fizzy drinks, then there was a man in uniform, a cop to be exact.

Today really turned into frisky Friday. I blame Friend.

After eating dinner, we watched I Love You, Man. The funny thing was, that I cannot for the life of me remember when I had seen it, but I definitely have. Is totally going to bug me now. Totes McGoats.