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Stan Van Gundy thinks the free agency fanfare has gotten out of control. He will not be watching LeBron James' one hour special. (Photo by Gary W. Green)

[Update: Listen to Van Gundy talk here.]

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that Stan Van Gundy will not watch tomorrow night’s LeBron James announcement special. James will declare his intentions for next season in a one-hour special on ESPN that will air at 9 p.m.

As Van Gundy put it a few minutes ago , “It takes 15 seconds to say, ‘I’ve decided to stay in Cleveland,’ but we’ve got another 59 minutes and 45 seconds to, what? Promote LeBron James? As if we don’t do that enough.”

Choosing one quote over another from the 7 minutes we spoke to Van Gundy about this before AirTran Airways Pro Summer League tipped off is completely impossible, so I’ve posted a nearly full transcript of Van Gundy’s thoughts on free agency.

Some highlights:

1. He thinks the whole spectacle is ridiculous and said the big three did a nice job putting on a charade.

2. He likened Chris Bosh and Dwyane Wade together to Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol and also said he wasn’t surprised Bosh went to Miami because he’d been following Wade around “for two weeks like a lapdog.”

3. He seemed to have great admiration for the way Kobe Bryant and Kevin Durant handled their recent contract extensions. “You don’t hear Kobe Bryant and certainly not Kevin Durant talking about their brand … they’re simply basketball players who want to be great players and win games.”

Here we go with the transcript. In a normal Q&A we’d have Qs and As, but a lot of our conversation was myself and the two other reporters with me just informing/reminding Van Gundy of things that happened and letting him react. So we’ve got R’s and SVG’s. Reporters and Stan Van Gundy’s.

R. Your thoughts on all this free agency stuff?

SVG: It’s gotten ridiculous I think. It’s really I mean it’s almost like a parody of itself this whole situation now. Come on, an hour long? It takes 15 seconds to say I’ve decided to stay in Cleveland but we’ve got another 59 minutes and 45 seconds to, what? Promote LeBron James? As if we don’t do that enough. Look, the guy’s a great player and wherever he goes, my bet would be Cleveland, that place will be excited. But an hour long special?

R. Sign of the times, I guess.

SVG: It is a sign of the times. Unfortunately. It’s amazing that a guy as good as Kobe Bryant simply extended his contract with no real fanfare or anything else.

R. Kevin Durant did, too.

SVG: Yeah and Kevin Durant is more in the Kobe Bryant mode. You don’t hear Kobe Bryant and certainly not Kevin Durant talking about their brand. They don’t. I hear that from the other guys. I don’t hear those guys talking about their brand, they’re simply basketball players who want to be great players and win games. Not that those other guys aren’t great players and don’t want to win games. They do, but there’s also more to it. It’s not what I like. Other people, I guess, like it. I’m sure it will be a widely watched show tomorrow. It simply will not have me as a member of that audience.

R. Bosh and Wade had their announcement on ESPN. Said he’s joining Wade.

SVG: Well, he’s been following him around for two weeks like his lapdog. So that doesn’t really surprise me.

R. What does that do to the balance of power in the East?

SVG: Certainly they’re, they were good anyway. They’re a team that was, the last two years was a number 5 seed and now they just added one of the best forwards in basketball. As far as a straight one-two punch that compares pretty favorably to Kobe and Pau Gasol. It’s right there. I think they’re instant contenders. I don’t think there’s any doubt. They’re instant contenders to win an NBA championship. It makes them very, very good. It’s not like they’re done. They’ve got a lot of money to put pieces around them. … I don’t care, right now, I can tell you they’ll get good enough pieces that they’re instant contenders.

R: Do you think Pat [Riley] will come back to coach?

SVG: I hope not. But I don’t have any knowledge.

R: As a coach, do you automatically start thinking about how this affects your team?

SVG: I think right off the bat you know there’s another significant contender in the East so that there’s no question it makes things tougher and you’re gonna have to be better. I don’t think there’s any doubt about that. You’re always sort of in the mode of, ‘What do we need to do to get better?’ It doesn’t really change, just adds another very significant competitor.

…I think a lot of people now will look at them as the team to beat in the East. You’re talking two of the top seven or eight offensive players in the NBA on the same team. I don’t think there’s any susprise. I think it’s what pretty much all of us thought would happen all along. I think these guys did a masterful job of creating suspense and carrying out a great charade. I don’t think there was any doubt. Stoudemire, I’m not sure anybody knew. But LeBron back to Cleveland, Wade and Bosh in Miami, is pretty much what everybody thought.

R: Joe Johnson back to Atlanta.

SVG: Joe Johnson back in Atlanta. There’s no big surprise.

R: Talking about LeBron, are you thinking he wouldn’t be on TV if he was going to leave?

SVG: That doesn’t have anything to do with it. I’ve always thought he’s going back to Cleveland. I just think this free agent thing has been a masterful publicity opportunity for all of them. They’ve done a great job of creating more interest in this brand. If Wade just comes right out and says I’m going back to Miami, he can’t get a film crew to follow him around to do that. Bosh had to make it look like he considered all these teams. And had to make it look like they were really considering those other teams so there would be some suspense and some interest. I think they did a great job of doing hat but in the end I don’t think they surprised anybody.

R: Think he could go to Miami?

SVG: If he went anywhere but Cleveland I’d be shocked, but I’d be doubly shocked if he went to Miami. [Wade and James] both want to be the man. I think Chris Bosh was a different story. I think he had tried to be the man. It didn’t work. I think he’s willing to be a very, very good second fiddle. I think he’s seen what happened to Pau Gasol. Teams that are good but couldn’t win the playoffs to being the second guy in L.A. and it’s worked well for him. I’m sure Chris Bosh envisions something pretty much the same. All those guys would love to be the man but it’s not that easy as a lot of them have found. I think it’s great for the Heat and good for him.