My God, What Have I Become

The title’s a joke, based on a realization I just had. I was thinking about how annoyed I was that I went on hiatus. I enjoyed every minute of my vacation, but I hate the idea of ever going on hiatus again. I was on a bitter mental tack, swerving back and forth between self-loathing for suggesting a hiatus and self-loathing for being a workaholic.

Anyway, that’s when I realized how ridiculous it was to think of myself as a workaholic. Driven? Sure. But I enjoy loafing around too much to be a workaholic. I can kick back and relax, and as I understand it — that’s the antithesis of a workaholic. I have some strange tendencies… like volunteering at conventions as my vacation.

I might have some workaholic tendencies, but I can’t hold a candle to people who have trouble relaxing. I’ve even been called slow by some people who bounce off the walls by comparison. Maybe the difference is, I like efficiency where I can, and I don’t like to expend more effort than I have to. Maybe that makes me a conservationist. Or lazy.

Really, I should be somewhere in the middle — would that make me normal? Wait, not normal. Average, perhaps, but not normal. I know too many people who are one way or the other. It might be one of those things where most people are extreme … maybe I just feel different because moderate people don’t tend to stand out.