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Introducing “DiResta,” a new video series on MAKE. In each episode, artist and master builder Jimmy DiResta (Dirty Money, Hammered, Against the Grain, Trash for Cash) will let us into his workshop, to look over his shoulder while he builds whatever strikes his fancy. In this episode, Jimmy finds a slab of locust wood at an upstate New York flea market and it instantly calls out “slab bench.”

Oh! Usually, when faced with these sorts of contests, I make my call based on loyalty. King Kong vs. Godzilla? The ape is going down! Godzilla is ten times the size of King Kong and breathes radioactive fire to boot. Alien vs. Predator? That’s a personal preference call. Alien, at least the first four movies, as a franchise, is a much classier and more innovative act than Predator which was never anything but tacky. Predator has its charms, but so did Snake Plissken and nobody takes him seriously. Superman vs. Batman? I’m thinking Superman would take it, but I couldn’t care less about either player so I just throw out the whole match as not being worthy of my time.

But I have an affection for both of these monsters, so I must consider this carefully. On first glance, it seems that Godzilla would win based on size and that radioactive fire breath. But the Alien is a parasitoid. What’s more, she’s a parasitoid that does not have a specific host. That is to say, she has tricks up her sleeve. And she has more at stake. If she’s going to complete her life cycle, she has to get over on the targeted host. She could just have run away, but as she is standing to fight, it isn’t simply to protect herself. She has a bigger motive. Also, if there is one Alien around, there are often multiples.

Godzilla, I’m thinking, is fucked. He may have stomped all of Tokyo before, but now I just want to warn him: “Brace yourself for oviposition.”