Mama said they make me nicer

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Sister

Over forty years ago today (and just how much over, I’m not telling) I was given a new role in life.

To be

a big sister.

I got two more chances to do this over the years, but this first one–the one I asked my parents for–she was the first, the one I learned and practiced on.

Some days I’ve done a better job than others of being a sister.

What being a sister means and looks like has changed over the years. Sometimes drastically. What, when we were little, meant whispering secrets after bedtime or fighting over who had to turn off the light (she didn’t even have to leave her bed–not really sure WHY we had that argument so often) turned into her being there to encourage me and stand up for me and even help me pack the night before my graduation. Help? No, she pretty much did it. All of it. As we both grew older and had our own families, what sisterhood looked like changed again.

It’s always changing.

Because relationships are fluid.

And I think that can be really beautiful.

Because, though it’s fluid and changing, it still is. The relationship is still there.

And as long as it is there, no matter how hard times might be or how much we struggle to find time to be together, there is hope. There is possibility for our relationship to grow and become even more precious. And there is grace.

Tonight I am thankful for my little sister, who all too often has been a big sister to me. She has never been afraid of the dark and time was, she’d take on a giant to defend me. She loves hard with a gentle voice and a passionate soul. I don’t remember life without her, since I was three when she was born–it’s as though she has always been a part of my story. She grounds me, she loves me, and she walks alongside me. Even when things fall apart or we argue or have doubts and frustrations, she is my sister, and that will always be one of the things I’m most thankful for in this life.