I own a duplex with my mother, she lives downstairs, I up. While she has been diagnosed with AD, she is for the most part okay by herself. I try to get home each day at lunch to break up the day and to check on things. Her judgment is VERY poor. My big fear is that she will let someone in the house. I have posted BEWARE OF DOG and NO SOLICITING signs on all entrance ways, and fenced in the back yard, but I am concerned that if someone rings the bell, she will let them in. I cannot lock her in, but I am wondering if there is a way to keep other people away from the house and to certainly prohibit anyone from entering? I am looking for any ideas/suggestions that would prevent someone from coming to the door to "use the phone" or to "check your meter" as she would give them free access to our living quarters. I have posted notes on the inside of the doors saying "DO NOT LET ANYONE IN" with my work number for her to call. I have informed regular visitors to inform me BEFORE they come, so I can either be there, or leave a note for her that it is okay to let so and so in. I considered disconnecting the doorbells, but I am sure a possible intruder would just knock anyway. Even if not, we have 2 dogs (who would only lick an intruder to death) who would alert her that someone was there. Also with summer coming she will be out in the yard more.How do I keep people away from Her? And if they do come near - keep them out of the house? She doesn't "get" that someone could want to hurt her.Any/All suggestions appreciated.

Poor thing, she sure has a lot on her plate too. And what a special daughter you are to go to the lengths that you do! I will pray for you and Mom, I prayed for all of you last night before I blacked out.

Soon and very soon. She has a PET scan tomorrow, and Cancer surgery next Thursday. We will know more then. I found an already fully furnished condo near the hospital for her for her 6 weeks of Radiation following surgery, depending on what they find and how it goes... One day at a time for now. If the Doc says she needs more help, she may go to a Rehab facility. We will see... I am praying for the best. Called Mom yesterday, and she is ready to move; even found a loving home for her dog if necessary... Thanks for asking, Naus, and your hugs. We would appreciate your prayers, as Mom is terrified. God bless you all.

Excellent idea! Didn't think of it, even though my Mom and Dad have one in their home. The police were calling me regularly when they forgot to set it correctly, though, during Dad's last days at home. Mom is still there, and has panic buttons installed on a switch on the walls of each room, and the windows can't be opened without a sensor detecting it, which is an additional safety feature. We're moving her very soon, maybe even next week, or else I'd purchase your suggestion of something around her neck to press if she falls. Thanks for sharing that wonderful idea, Leah! It's expensive, but worth it. The monitoring is approximately $350.00 per year, which is reasonable ($1/day). If an alarm goes off, a dispatcher sends local law enforcement to the scene to investigate. They call me 200 miles away saying an alarm sounded and that police are enroute. They ask if I will be showing up. I tell them, "Yeah, in 4 hours! Call me if you need me to come down..." Oftentimes it's nothing, and Mom is OK

This may not be a viable option, but...what about getting a burglar alarm system? The company would post signs on the windows and outside stating that it is installed. I have vascular dementia and I feel much more confident and safe knowing that I can set the alarm. Of course, I do remember the code to turn it off to let my dog out. In your mother's case, she shouldn't have any reason to leave the house during the hours you are away. My husband and I also put a handwritten sign on the door stating that the alarm is on...so no one ever knows if it is or it isn't. The other good thing about an alarm system is the health safety feature alert system which your mother could wear and press in case of her own health emergency. Of course, you do stand the risk of having to pay fines if the alarm goes off too many times as a false alarm.An adult daycare situation sounds like the best alternative. I have watched the elderly at the senior center nearby and they are happy as can be with all the activities the center provides. Good luck with your mother's situation.

Do you work outside the home, kverduyn? I would be afraid to leave Mom alone, too. An option might be to install a "Nanny cam" connected to your computer, which shows you how she's doing when you're not there. Sounds like you need assistance for Mom, or more help. A day care situation during the day? Let us know how things work out.

Dear kverduyn, this is a good one. The only way you can protect her from these strangers, solicitors, or any one else is to not let her live alone. And by all means, you must worry about the phone. The front door is not the only way that strangers can get to her. Trust me on this one. The strangers on the phone were more dangerous than the ones who came to the door. I know this with my Dad. He had people calling him up telling him he won money all the time. He would, at their instructions, drive down to the local wal-mart, or whatever place would sell and send money grams to anywhere, to give them the required deposit, before they could send him the money that they said he had won. This is a situation that will get worse due to cognitive decline with alzheimers. They only way to completely protect her, is to not let her live alone. Good luck and prayers to you.Nauseated

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