Note: Make sure to watch in high-definition, your eyeballs deserve it. Unless you're one of my enemies, in which case your eyeballs deserve to be GOUGED OUT WITH SHISH KABOB SKEWERS.

This is a video from Lavapix of 2,000°F lava flows destroying Coke cans. "What's that in Celsius?" Super f***ing hot. What does Lavapix have against Coke cans? No clue, maybe they blame soda for a family member's diabetes. I rarely drink soda, but when I do it's either 1. grape 2. orange 3. cream soda or 4. red cream soda. Remember that when you're buying snacks for my Super Bowl party this weekend. "You don't want me to bring beer?" Nope, I'm going sober! "Seriously?" No, you're just not invited is the thing.

Keep going for the video. I like how the one can starts peeing. I'd probably do the same thing if I were being devoured by lava.

Thanks to bloodstain (OMG WHAT HAPPENED?!) and Tim C, who destroy Coke cans the old fashioned way: smashing them on their heads after they're finished to impress girls.