ALARM! Enemy Observed! Read Now to Be Safe!

Sloth, meepits, Xandra, The Stuff: There’s an endless list of evil things happening in Neopia at this very moment. To help you helpless Neopians to defeat one of them right away (and never have to fear this villain anymore), I have written this pwnful guide only for you. And a few hundred insecure, helpless Neopians more.

Behold... The official guide in how to conquer that evil villain we call...

BOREDOM!!! (Yes, that is his official name, no question about it.)

Read now and learn how to dodge his boring attacks on Neopia! Obviously I know you think this sounds totally awesome already but relax; there’s even more to come! This is the number #1 most awesome what-to-do guide that has ever smash hit the Neopian Times.

1. Word of the day

Enter your word of the day! If it is really perfect and awesome, it will soon be displayed on the homepage and you will be attacked by fangirls and you’ll be totally famous and soon rich!

Or maybe not. Just submit a word and cross your fingers. Yeah!!!

2. Play games

My second amazing offer to you is the perfect idea of playing games! Yaaaay! There are hundreds of fun games and I suggest you dig up some old ones or maybe visit the game graveyard. The good thing about this is that you get NP (!!!) and it’s... fun!

Maybe you think all games are boring and you think this was a bad idea and are about to scroll away this thing, but please don’t do that. I have the perfect solution for you non-believers:

It IS always fun to play a game you have never thought about playing. Yup, it’s true. So click “Search all games” and then close your eyes, and click randomly at the screen. If you are pretty awesome you’ll finally end up on a random game, if not, you might have poor clicking-skills and end up on customisation or something else silly.

PS: Remember to open your eyes after clicking randomly – or else you might fall over when you go for a glass of apple juice.

3. Send a Neogreeting

Show off how much fun you are having with a greeting card! You might even know someone you forgot at Christmas or who soon has their birthday. Send a card today!

4. Get a job!

At the Faerieland Employment Agency! Refresh fast if you want to do free jobs and then go search for the items needed. Good rewards! Awesome!!!!

5. Customise

Opened your eyes yet? Good! You are an excellent student in how to defeat Boredom! Now, moving on to customisation. So, the fun thing about customisation is that your neopet(s) will look totally different! Dig up ALL clothes you have in your Safety Deposit Box and push them into your overfull closet. Now, remove all stuff your neopets are wearing. Now you should have at least 40 different wearable things in your closet. Then start thinking of what theme you pets could have. Maybe pirate? Summer clothed? My personal favorite is glowing-christmas-spooky-robot-in-space. Also known as “random stuff looks cool”.

Still need hints with the customisation? Put all the clothes on and find cool looks! Try different styles on each pet until you are happy. Then you need something else to protect yourself against Boredom, so here it comes! Yay!

6. Chat

If you are over 13 years old, a fun thing is to chat with people! Come on, don’t be shy now! If you don’t want to enter someone else's board, here are two great ideas about what to talk about.

Jelly World does NOT exist! Please help those poor people's minds out and talk sense with them. People talking about nonexistent things is not good at all! Meeep!

Wishing Well avatar. Seriously! Stop being so lazy and go chat about how to get it! Don’t forget to include the link to the well so you (and everyone you are chatting with) can go there to donate neopoints. I’m counting on you!

7. Habitarium

What? Haven’t you been taking care of your little P3s today? Well, then do so! They need a lot of attention, which makes this a good way to keep yourself busy. An idea is to paint your petpetpets or their buildings with nice colours to brighten it all up a little.

Change the appearance of your habitarium by getting a few decorations (ooh, shiny space ships... ) and move all your buildings around.

8. NC Mall

The Mall has loads of clothing and other things for you. If you can’t afford the stuff you want or don’t have any NeoCash, you can just see yourself around and try everything on your pets to find a perfect look! It doesn’t cost anything to try on, ya know. Cool!

9. Competitions

This is always fun: Entering contests to winning fame, points, prizes and world dominati- *cough* Okay, maybe not that last one. But who cares, there’s other awesome prizes! My personal favourites are Random Contest, where you create things (like a plushie or sculpture) by yourself! Different theme every week.

Customisation Spotlight, enter your newly-customised pets!

Lenny Conundrum, maybe you feel like thinking? (If you have no idea you can just guess an answer, like “upside down” or “kaleidoscope”.)

Pet Spotlight, every neopet deserves fifteen minutes of fame! Write a short story about your neopet and draw a little picture, nothing else but great fun, both for you and your pet.

Or just click the link to all contests in Neopia. There you’ll find approximately twenty four different competitions! You can’t say no to ALL of them!? Or maybe you can, but it’s hard, believe me.

10. Pet description

Are your pets' descriptions empty? Why? Fill them now with their personality, background and future hopes! After you have done all that, they will have a new amazing personality which you can dress them after (even more customising to keep Boredom away!!) and so on.

Plus, your neopets will be so happy that they will start cleaning up after themselves at home, help you with the dishes after dinner, and give you awesome presents for Christmas! Woohoo! Or, well... It MIGHT happen? Just try it out, will you?

11. Do quests

There are several pets/faeries/monsters out there who need your help! Now, go help them with their expensive needs.

12. Talk to your petpets

Have an interesting conversation with your petpet. Expect many jumps into the air and “Brrrflp”.

13. Read the Neopian Times

You’ll find even more cool articles, comics, stories and answered questions (by TNT themselves!) in the Times! And if you really are reading this, you must be only one click away from another cool entry! Awesome!

14. Enter the Neopian Times

Come up with something funny and draw, write, or write, or write something else about it! Get a cool trophy and compete with me in getting published... !

On second thought, don’t do that. *shifty eyes*

15. Go outside

There is more to this world than meets the eye. If you gaze a little up, left or usually right you might see an often square object. It’s called a window. See it? See what’s behind it? Try to get there somehow... I promise it will be rewarding.

So... Hope you have learned something from this and now understand how important it is for you and your pets to defeat Boredom before he finds you. Go out there and BE SAFE!

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