Um, it seems Petra is busy getting her “udders and pussy milked” so it looks like it really is just me and you today.

Well, then…This whole sexy, milky fetish is some kind of big deal on the internet. I mean, just try and find out some non porn related information about lactation on the old computer. Even with your “safe search” on, the Lactation Nations and Squirting Milk Maids come crashing through your browser faster than you can say, “Holy Prolactin, Batman!”

You’d think this fetish was totally a hetero/pregnant thing, right? Well, get this, you don’t even have to be pregnant to make some sexy milk for your partner and some lesbians are even into it! Check out what my buddy, Wiki, says:

“However, milk production can be “artificially” and intentionally induced in the absence of any pregnancy in the woman. This is called induced lactation, while a woman who has lactated before and re-starts is said to relactate. This can be done by regularly sucking on the nipples (several times a day), massaging and squeezing the female breasts or with additional help from temporary use of milk-inducing drugs, such as the Dopamine antagonist Domperidone. In principle — with considerable patience and perseverance — it is possible to induce lactation by sucking on the nipples alone.“

Wow…pretty neat.

Oh, have you ever heard of the Adult Nursing Relationship (ANR) groups? They’re all into the squirt-happy-milk-fun, but don’t call them fetishists or perverts! Oh no, they’re all about, “I’m bonding with my partner through this beautiful act of love and sharing.” Jesus Christ, I hate it when fetishist get together and make up a ton of rules and use fancy codewords about feelings and emotions to try and hide the fact that what they do is kind of weird and outside the “societal norms.” Their websites are filled with quotes by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and Günter Grass and tasteful paintings of voluptuous nudes.

Where’s the fun? Where’s the dangerous element of kink? Where’s the explicit pictures of hot babes shooting milk out of their amazing mammary glands? I respect the hardcore porn sites attention to detail and straight up delivery of the goods! Like this:

“Does the sight of big milky boobs turn you on? Yeah, I know what you like, large ripe breasts that are begging to be squeezed and rubbed until she lactates sweet milk out of her big brown nipples. These busty girls always have titty hard ons and when their ready to spray milk all over their man, they aim to please. At sexy milking and lactation, you will find high quality lactating movies and pictures of beautiful, natural milking breasts. Whether its shooting milk out of their large round boobs to the sound of pumping milk trickling into a bottle these busty girls love to explode and get wet!“

Yes, Lactating Beauties, I think I do! Thanks for keeping it real this Friday! Ok, one last image to get you in the mood for a tall glass of milk!