You were saving the dateBut you woke up too latePulled the covers down over your headYou haven't left your front doorFor a week maybe moreTell me, hey, what's the news from your bedYou know your face is all covered with your birthday cakeThat you're eating in the kitchen at homeAnother banner year, a splendid dayAnother inch or two that you've grownBut it's hard to celebrate on your own

There's a mouse in cupboard that nibbles your crumbsAnd you talk to him every nightYou say, "Hey, Mr. Whiskers, I'm bored and I'm numbYou can stay if you just treat me right. "Just last year you were fortunate babyAnd your friends circled around you in drovesAre they thinking of you? Maybe just maybe

But not a one has bothered to phoneTell me where oh where did they go

Called a carAbout an hour agoYou're gonna take yourself outDespite the cold and snowDid they forget about youAre they in on it too?You're sitting looking in the mirrorAt your dancing shoes

When your family calls you make nice to them allAnd assure them you're fine and you're greatThen you cry in the bath, cry so hard that you laughThen you watch television til lateWho do you need? Nobody.You're lucky nobody's aroundI can pour my own drinksNo thanks, Mister. Go on, and get out of townAnd you're gorgeous in your evening gown.