This is a discussion on How do you process life grief within the ESTP Forum - The Doers forums, part of the SP's Temperament Forum- The Creators category; Originally Posted by DrJRM731
That&#8217;s a great question. The answer for me is, very badly. I avoid like crazy and ...

I never really stew on things, I don't believe it to be useful to wallow in any bad emotion or situation outside of my control. I believe in moving ever forward and learning from any grief life may throw at me. In my darker period I found myself in a truly unhappy relationship of 5 years, and used alcohol as a means to fast forward each day so I wouldn't have to bother with it. This is further to the point that I constantly seek to move forward, that was just a really bad method of doing it.

I've been out of that relationship for about 3 months now, and my life is significantly improved. I've moved into a house with a badass roommate, got my drinking back down to social/casual, and picked up a stellar FWB. Perhaps ESTPs just have a hard time dealing with life grief and seek to outrun it, or focus on something a bit simpler and less messy.

I never really stew on things, I don't believe it to be useful to wallow in any bad emotion or situation outside of my control. I believe in moving ever forward and learning from any grief life may throw at me. In my darker period I found myself in a truly unhappy relationship of 5 years, and used alcohol as a means to fast forward each day so I wouldn't have to bother with it. This is further to the point that I constantly seek to move forward, that was just a really bad method of doing it.

I've been out of that relationship for about 3 months now, and my life is significantly improved. I've moved into a house with a badass roommate, got my drinking back down to social/casual, and picked up a stellar FWB. Perhaps ESTPs just have a hard time dealing with life grief and seek to outrun it, or focus on something a bit simpler and less messy.

That's cool. That approach, I always had that too before. About not wallowing in bullshit or being bothered about situations like that. Moving forward is very important to me too. I don't know how much all this is type dependent (as you can see I don't type as ESTP though I sortof have that as my secondary mode in some ways). I always keep wanting to outrun such things for myself yeah, then get really angry when I can't. I used to be able to outrun or just ignore it all more before, now I'm more like I indicated in my above short post lol. How did you leave the bad relationship if I can ask?

She was avoiding talking about the future, which was incredibly uncharacteristic of her. So I just went direct and said "what, are you planning on breaking up soon?", and she said yeah. Personally, I was gonna do it after our lease was up, but it came out earlier. Super amicable, just outgrew each other.

Could be an ST thing, could be a competency thing (135), or even a ping of a type 7 in you. Plenty of possibilities.

She was avoiding talking about the future, which was incredibly uncharacteristic of her. So I just went direct and said "what, are you planning on breaking up soon?", and she said yeah. Personally, I was gonna do it after our lease was up, but it came out earlier. Super amicable, just outgrew each other.

lol uncharacteristic of her? what was her type?

Could be an ST thing, could be a competency thing (135), or even a ping of a type 7 in you. Plenty of possibilities.