Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Sideswipe

H is not the only problem. Spotted by local blog Whale Oil (www.whaleoil.co.nz)

From the London Review of Books personals, whereby writers use their over-developed and under-utilised creative talent to get laid.

1. "The uncomfortable mantle of guilt, the heavy cloak of ignominy, the coarse socks of denial, the iridescent trousers of doubt, the belligerent underpants of self-loathing. All worn by the haberdasher of shame (M, 34, Pembs.). Seeks woman in possession of the Easy-Up iron-on hem of redemption and some knowledge of workaday delicates. No loons."

* * *

Moses is alive and well and living in Browns Bay: more hearing-impaired copy-takers from a North Shore community newspaper. This notice appeared on Friday. "Browns Bay ... Sat 11th. Huge garage sale, moving of seas. Something for everyone."

* * *

It is a media column and Sky TV is media, but not the sort you'd expect from former National Business Review writer Deborah Hill Cone, who now freelances for several mags including the Listener. Hill Cone made a reference to Playhouse Disney's Stanley cartoon this week in her Listener column, calling Radio New Zealand's book of editorial principles The RNZ Great Big Book of Everything. Tis a song that the cartoon gang, including Stanley and Dennis the goldfish, sing: "The great big book of everything, with everything inside." Parenthood is treating her well, obviously.

* * *

A reader writes: "Perhaps NZ Cricket should also be a bit more family-friendly with their choice of music. They've been playing the James Blunt song You're Beautiful, except they've been using the album version, not the censored radio version. Yesterday morning when New Zealand won they played it loudly, so booming all around Eden Park (and beyond) was the line "I was f-ing high" instead of "I was flying". Made a few people raise their eyebrows, especially those with little critters in tow (who, by the way, should have been at bloody school)".

* * *

Auckland City Council responds to a moan about being charged $4.70 for a $2 per half-hour parking space using their text parking service. The council says: "Your reader would have only been charged $2.50. People taking advantage of the new text parking service in the CBD are charged a one-off 50c transaction fee each time they park. This goes directly to the mobile company and technology provider, rather than the council. It does not cost an additional 20c to send the text and it does not cost anything to read texts. It's really all about offering our customers more choice. If people don't want to pay an extra 50c for the convenience of text parking, they can continue using traditional coin payment."