“We ran across them on ebay with no reserve. How is this possble? We bid quickly and didn’t overpay. At the last moment, someone took exception to our purchase. Paypal tried to reverse the transaction. But it was too late. We’ve since dropped Pootie-Poot and will be transacting under a different account in the future.”

(It should be noted that Chelsea Clinton, Vice-Chair of the Clinton Foundation has a 99.9 feedback rating on eBay, though the vice part makes some buyers nervous.)

Asked to comment on a very black day for America’s own gay community, Clinton continued: “Let me say this with all the conviction rank hypocrisy allows. This isn’t a day for politics because the optics are insurmountable.Tomorrow though is a fresh news day, Allah be praised.”