WOOD YOU BELIEVE? Woody Johnson's Jets have used some, uh, interesting tactics to try to sell personal-seat licences for their new stadium. Photo: Neil Miller

What’s green and white and full of it?

A year ago, the Jets had a 20-year tickets waiting list. Now?

With PSL Stadium opening next season, good seats still unsold and the clock running down, the Jets barely can mask their desperation. Last week, they e-mailed oily come-ons promising renewed ticket-holders an autographed Mark Sanchez ball, or free parking, or “a $250 food and beverage credit,” or “two pregame passes to stand on the field of your new stadium” if they refer someone wealthy/foolish enough to buy a PSL or Club Seat.

The missive began with this transparent garbage from a Jets ticket salesman:

“I have some great news! It won’t be long before the new stadium is sold out and you will cruise by those ‘Got Tickets?’ signs on the way to your own seats. But don’t leave your friends and colleagues out in the cold.”

Yeah, OK. The Jets have created an incentive program to sell tickets they know they will have no trouble selling. They’re doing that for you and your friends, got that? Reads more like a Wayne Root mailer.

The Jets, though, can’t help but throw some insult — some, “Dear, Stupid” — into the sell. Last year, they allowed everyone to think that some big-talker — since indicted for millions in bank fraud — spent $420,000 on two front-row seats.

But wait, there’s more:

Tickets to Penn State football also may soon become a luxury item. According to the Altoona Mirror, where once the school extorted $100 per ticket, through the Nittany Lion Club, for the right to buy season tickets — a mini PSL — next year that privilege could cost, depending on seat location, $200-$600 per ticket, plus the cost of tickets.

Increases could run fans anywhere from double to 500 percent. Recession? What recession? Layoffs? Where?

Penn State’s home schedule next year includes Youngstown State and Kent State. Kinda like the NFL’s must-buy exhibition games.

And there’s even more:

Indiana University has relocated next year’s home game against Penn State to FedEx Field in Landover, Md., creating a home-field environment for the visiting team. IU, which claims it, a) wants to raise its recruiting profile in the Washington, D.C. area, and, b) needs the money, will be paid $3 million for the switch.

If IU thinks it important to play a home game in the D.C. area, why not book the U.S. Treasury Building?

But being a sports fan/patron has become synonymous with being a sap, an invite to wear a “Kick Me” sign, front, back and on your (dunce) cap. Three major airlines have added a $50 surcharge for flights out of Miami on Feb. 8. The Super Bowl will be played in Miami on Feb. 7. Last year, the NFL charged $800 for not-so-good seats, $1,200 for the better ones.

Kick me? Kick you!

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Bud Selig last week said that MLB’s postseason schedule has too many gaps in it.

Really? No kidding? Who knew?

For example, before Game 6 of the ALCS, the Yankees and Angels each played only eight times in 20 days. What is this, the NBA playoffs?

And then the World Series ended a week into November. But that’s what happens when you sell your authority to TV, for the last, oh, 25 years.

Selig said he’s going to try to tighten the schedule.

Last year, Selig conceded that World Series games, because they often ended well after midnight (but only for the previous, oh, 20 years), would begin a half-hour earlier.

That’s the wonderful thing about big league baseball on Bud’s watch — he’s flexible, willing to bend; he will try new things.

One problem, though: From steroids to schedules, the Commissioner of Baseball always seems to be the last to notice what most everyone else can’t miss. Wait until he finds out about 2½-hour rain delays. He may want to act quickly and decisively on those, too.

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Really, now, at 6-2 and with the only winning record in his division, how much did Bill Belichick risk by going for it on fourth-and-two? . . . Which would Jets fans/local media prefer, a team that blocks and tackles well, or one that swaggers? . . . A CBS primetime promo, Thursday, encouraged viewers to catch “Brett Favre and Jets at the undefeated Titans,” today — last year’s game on Nov. 23.

Some blowouts look/sound much sicker than they actually were. Tennessee, last week, beat UNC-Asheville 124-49. Whoa! UT, though, played 14 players — six off the bench played at least 13 minutes — and no starter went more than 23 minutes. . . . The NFL would have us believe that without additional research, it’s impossible to conclude who would more likely suffer irreversible brain damage, prize fighters or CPAs, soccer players or soccer moms, wide receivers or pastry chefs.

Here’s something you’re not likely to hear today on a pregame show: For the last few seasons, coach Marvin Lewis and team owner Mike Brown have lamented the fact that the Bengals have been stuck with so many criminals. Bad luck of the draw, ya know? Yet, last week the Bengals went out of their way to sign often-arrested — but only four times since 2003 — Larry Johnson, dumped by the Chiefs as a relentless bad guy.

Sean Dougherty of Clifton, N.J. has a reasonable request for the NHL Network: When re-broadcasting out-of-region games, generally late the same night they were played, could you stop posting the game’s final score in the crawl along the bottom of the screen? Thank you.