Lawn Mowing Headphones – FOUND!

If you remember, last summer I could be found bitching about my second least favorite adult chore, mowing, and how it wouldn’t be so bad if I could just find a decent pair of headphones to wear that wouldn’t fall off my damned head while I was doing it. Now, if you remember, my primary concern was just having some music to make the entire experience suck that much less, but that I had a couple of problems that kept me from just wearing whatever headphones I could find.

They wouldn’t stay on my sweaty, nasty head.

My ears have freakishly small ear holes.

Well, in the last 6 months, I have continued my search for the perfect set of headphones, looking for something that would be cordless, loud, and not get ruined by the insane amount of salty water that pours out of my head when I do anything more physically demanding that typing… the mouse itself has been known to make me sweaty.

Fortunately, there is another group of people that have similar needs to us dutiful lawn mowers: Joggers.

That’s right, running sucks as much as mowing, and since we all know the golden rule is everything is better with music, runners need it too, with the same requirements, since they will also be actively trying to sweat another 3 pounds out of their brains.

I have to admit, I haven’t actually used them for mowing yet, but I can tell you a few things that make me absolutely confident that they will be perfect come spring:

They do not fall off the head. In fact, it takes the aid of my trained gorilla Jon Bon Jovial to remove them from my head at all.

They drown out all noise. I’ve tried them in some crazy environments, and I can even listen to quiet audio books over the top of jackhammers.

The battery lasts for approximately 13 years.

You can drop them in a puddle and they don’t short out, I’ve witnessed this first hand.

So, really, it’s only a matter of time until I have to fight the yard again, but at least this year I’m going into the fight better armed. Between new headphones and a list of must listen audiobooks about 30 miles long, I’m all set.

Published by M.A. Brotherton

M.A. Brotherton is a writer, blogger, artist, and fat-kid from the suburbs of Kansas City, Missouri. He’s tasted a little bit of everything the Midwest has to offer, ranging from meth-tweaking rednecks in massive underground cave complexes to those legendary amber waves of grain. When he’s not writing, he spends most of his time screwing around on the internet.