Breaking News: The Tuna Gate Scandal

Salt Lake City, Utah – Donald Trump just recently visited Utah to sign a bill that would greatly reduce the size of Bears Ears and Escalante National Monuments. Trump’s long time friend Senator Orrin Hatch originally asked Trump if he would come to Utah and undo the bill that former President Obama signed, that expanded the size of the national monument. A quick flight on Airforce One and the stroke of a pen and Trump wiped out Obama’s Bill. He also met with LDS church leaders to discuss Welfare Square.

Trump- Meet The Mormons

There was more to Trumps visit than people know.
The Brine Shrimp received a video of Hatch and Trump discussing this. We also recieved emails communications between the two men. Something seemed fishy.

What the public doesn’t know is that a secret deal went down. Tump originally declined Hatch’s request to come to Utah, Orrin had to bribe him to get him here. What could possibly offer him? He has all the money in the world. Everything is within his reach. That’s where his Mr. Trumps hidden addiction was exploited by Hatch. Donald Trump loves Mormon tuna. He loves it, bigly! And Orrin knows it. You probably noticed Trumps strange behavior when he visited Welfare Square. He started acting weird around the tuna.

Donald Trump chomping down on Mormon Tuna

Hatch promised Donald that he would use his LDS connections to get Mr. Trump approved for church welfare. Once approved he could gain access to The Bishop’s Storehouse, where he could get endless Mormon Tuna.

Trump greatly exceeded the income limit for these services, but Hatch made it happen. He also pulled some strings to get Donald extra tuna on his food order. Trump plans on using tax payer dollars to make secret trips to Utah on Airforce One to pickup his weekly food order.

Hatch returned the favor to The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints by signing over some of the land to the church. Apparently, they believe a Stargate or a wormhole in the area that will take you to Planet Kolob.