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75+ Best Funny Sarcastic Quotes You Won’t Believe

Before you quickly enjoy the funny sarcastic quotes and share it with your friends, what do you know about sarcasm?

Sarcasm is a bitter taunt or a satirical remark to make fun of something. Mostly, friends start being sarcastic to spice up the conversation. It is usually for giving a comic effect to the dialogues. Sometimes, being sarcastic defines dual meanings of certain words or sentences and the friendly environment becomes extremely funny. More often the next person failed to understand the meaning and the sarcastic soul continue to say a joke (Usually a double standard talk).

If you sit in a collective gathering of different brains, you’ll always enjoy the sarcastic dialogues and would laugh out lol (LOL). Sometimes, the bitter dialogues can also make the conversation unpleasant and distasteful.

Do you get sarcasm and feel entertained?

If no, then I think you should search for the studies showing sarcastic people are smarter and intellectual than you imagine.

Sarcastic people are more active and sharp minded. They are blessed to think sharp and come up with a responsive answer. Only people with a good sense of humor can write comic books, novels, and plays. They use their healthier brains to gently insult someone and make others laugh. They love being in a sarcastic company of lovable friends.

Now, let’s come to the most humorous part of this post. I’m sure you’ll not just take pleasure in the funny sarcastic quotes but actually, love them. Have witty quotes and be sarcastic. Life will be more fun to live!

75+ Funny Sarcastic Quotes

Husband: Tell me an interesting fact that will make me happy and sad at the same time. Wife: Yours is bigger than all your friends.

Sarcasm: The ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.

Don’t regret doing things, regret getting caught

Stupidity is not a crime, so you’re free to go.

Don’t cry because its over, smile because his new girlfriend looks like a horse.

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90 % of their body… men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

You sound better with your mouth closed.

Well at least your mom thinks you’re pretty…

When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.

You know you’re awesome when people you don’t even know hate you.

Tell me how I have upset you, because I want to know how to do it again.

If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.

I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.

Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?

I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.

You always do me a favor, when you shut up!

Strong people don’t put others down. They lift them up and slam them on the ground for maximum damage.

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

I hate when I am about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.

No, you don’t have to repeat yourself, … I was ignoring you the first time.

I’m really good at stuff until people watch me do that stuff.

I don’t hate you. Its just my attitude has problems with your personality.

If I ever need a heart transplant, I’d want my ex’s. It’s never been used.

A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.

If you see me smiling it’s because I’m thinking of doing something evil or naughty. If you see me laughing it’s because I’ve already done it.

Take my advice — I’m not using it.

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.

My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy… so I got drunk.

Whatever you do always give 100 %. Unless you are donating blood.

Oh… I didn’t tell you… Then It must be none of your business…

Never break someone’s heart because they have only one inside…break their bones because they have 206 of them.

My son asked me what it’s like to be married so I told him to leave me alone and when he did I asked him why he was ignoring me.

My internet is so slow, it’s just faster to drive to the Google headquarters and ask them shit in person.

Not many people can listen to you and survive. I should be getting an award.

People say money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you had enough money, you can have a key made.

My wife sent her photograph to the Lonely Hearts Club. They sent it back saying they weren’t that lonely.

Yesterday, I fell down from a 10 meter ladder. Thank God I was on the third step.

People who write “u” instead of “you”. What do you do with all the time you save?

My husband is on the roof – only a few inches away from an insurance claim that could completely change my life.

Me: Siri, why am I alone? Siri: *opens front facing camera*

Think Im Sarcastic? Watch Me Pretend To Care!

Boy : I have a pen you have a phone number. Think of the possibilities. Girl : I have a sandal you have a face. Think of Casualties.

I just want to live in a world where people come with on/off switches.

Even people who are good for nothing can bring smile on your face, when pushed down the stairs…

Maybe you need a ladder to climb out of my business?

Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

It takes two to lie… One to lie and one to listen…

You are not as bad as people say, you are much, much worse.

Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

Girl you’re like a car accident, cause I just can’t look away.

Learn from your parents’ mistakes: use birth control.

When people don’t make sense, listen to music. It always does.

You fell asleep! No I just closed by eyes for few hours.

Just in case you haven’t noticed, you are ugly both mentally and physically. Other than that? You are totally fine!

Did something bad happen to you or are you just naturally ugly.

I’ve been running as fast as I can, but I still can’t catch my breath.

How to lose an argument with a woman: 1) Argue.

Hey, what a coincidence! You’ve the same name as my dog!

The universe is laughing behind your back.

Are you thinking what I’m thinking that I think that you’re thinking I’m thinking because if you think that I think what I think I’m thinking then we’ve got a problem?

I’m not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

The human race is lucky I’m a nice guy, otherwise only 1/4 of them would be alive right now.

A paper should be like a mini skirt: long enough to cover everything, but short enough to keep it interesting.

I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

I’m not sure what’s wrong… But it’s probably your fault!

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.

Reality? That’s where the pizza delivery guy comes from!

Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!

I wasn’t mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I’m mad.. yes, I’m mad!

Funny Sarcastic Quotes with Images

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I’m very sure that you’ve completely enjoyed the funny sarcastic quotes and images. Do you have something in your mind that can be witty and funny?