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Today's Bonehead Award goes to a
Florida man, who was arrested for attacking a
Karaoke DJ over mic volume
Details at Boneheads
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Today, October 28, in
1636 Harvard College was founded in Massachusetts.
More of what happened on this day in history at History
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Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly
pathetic that it has to be us.
--- Jerry Garcia, (of the Grateful Dead)
"The nine most terrifying words in the English
language are, 'I'm from the government and
I'm here to help.'
--- Ronald Reagan
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If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!
______________________________________________________
The basketball coach stormed into the university
President's office and demanded a raise right then and
there.
"Please," protested the college President, "you
already make more than the entire History department."
"Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put
up with," the coach blustered. "Look, I'll Give you an
example."
The coach went out into the hall and grabbed a jock
who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my
office and see if I'm there," he ordered.
Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out
of breath.
"You're not there, sir," he reported.
"Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the President,
scratching his head. "I would have phoned first."
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Soon after marriage, a lady's husband stopped wearing
his wedding ring. She asked,
"Why don't you ever wear your wedding band?"
He replied, "It cuts off my circulation."
She answered back, "It's supposed to!"
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Kansas
My friend shared this tree with me. I thought you might enjoy it too.
Be safe and careful. You are a valued person.
Janice
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please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
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______________________________________________________
An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD
has been earned by
Joshua Fort,
26,
DeBary,
Florida,
Florida man was arrested for attacking
Karaoke DJ over mic sound
The only record this karaoke singer will have is a
criminal one.
A man in DeBary, Florida, was arrested Thursday morning
after police said he assaulted a karaoke DJ at Blackie's
Bar.
Joshua Fort, 26, was performing the Jay Z and Justin
Timberlake jam "Holy Grail' with another man, when he
sounded a discordant note at the job being done by DJ
Omar Isaac, according to the Daytona Beach News-Journal.
Police said when Isaac didn't pump up the volume on
Fort's microphone, the suspect responded in a way that
speaks volumes.
First, Fort grabbed the DJ’s laptop computer and slammed
it shut. Then witnesses said the suspect threw a glass at
Isaac that hit the DJ on the side of his head.
Fort is also accused of pulling the DJ to the dance floor
and throwing him on the ground there, according to WNDB.com.
Fort fled the scene, but later turned himself into the
Volusia County Jail, where he was charged with aggravated
battery with a deadly weapon. He was released on $5,000 bond.
The suspect told police he ran from the karaoke bar because
because he “knew he was going to be in trouble” and that
“everyone would point fingers at him,” according to a police
report obtained by WNDB.com.
Before his arrest, he was treated at a local hospital for
injury to his left hand.
Because the alleged crime centered around karaoke, the
Florida Sun-Sentinel suggested the suspect be shipped off
to Sing Sing.
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Tech Support Pits
From: Neil
Re: Tracker PDF editor
Dear Webby,
PDF Exchange does have a free version that is likely to be
close to the same as Nitro. On their main page, in the
upper left corner just below the banner is a graphic that
says Get Free PDF Viewer now. If you click on that graphic
it will download the free viewer. I liked their product
so much that I purchased it, but I have many pdf docs that
I must edit and annotate.
http://www.tracker-software.com/
Neil
Dear Neil
Thank you for that info!
Marlene also reported on that:
"this is a program I have used for several years.
this version is free"
Have FUN!
DearWebby
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A minister was planning a wedding at the close
of the Sunday morning service.
After the benediction he had planned to call the
couple down to be married for a brief ceremony
before the congregation. For the life of him, he
couldn't think of the names of those who were
to be married. So he simply asked:
"Will those wanting to get married please come to the front?"
Immediately, nine single ladies, four widows,
tree widowers, two single men and a lady in a formal
wedding gown stepped to the front.
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If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter,
please donate what you can!
______________________________________________________
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Molasses Sugar Cookies
This is a crisp spice cookie. I make them every Christmas
and give some away for gifts. They were my late mother's
favorite and it reminds me of her when I make them.
Approximate Time: About 15 minutes plus 1 hour chilling
and 8-10 min.baking time
Yield: Approximately 3 doz.
Ingredients:
3/4 cup shortening
1 cup sugar
1/4 cup molasses
1 egg
2 tsp baking soda
2 cups flour
1/2 tsp cloves
1/2 tsp ginger
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
Steps:
Melt the shortening in a 3 or 4 quart saucepan over low heat.
Remove from heat and let cool. Then add sugar, molasses and
egg and beat well using an electric hand mixer.
In a separate bowl combine the flour with the rest of the
dry ingredients.
Mix the wet and dry ingredients together. Chill for 1 hour.
Form into 1 inch balls and roll in granulated sugar.
Place on a greased cookie sheet, a silicon mat or parchment
paper. Space about 2 inches apart.
Bake at 375ºF for 8-10 minutes.
Source: A recipe on the bottle of Brer Rabbit Molasses
By Diana W. [12]
You can drastically cut down on the sugar and increase
molasses to get traditional soft gingerbread cookies.
You have to add more flour until you can roll the dough
into balls. They will melt into flat cookies in the oven.
Have FUN!
DearWebby
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Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
Read it on line or subscribe. If you subscribe,
look for the double opt-in confirmation request.

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One day, Jean-Claude decided to take a trip from
Montreal (where he lived) to that great city of
Boston.. He went to the airport to buy a ticket and
found out the cost was $200 one-way.
Well Jean-Claude only had $110 on him. But he saw a
sign saying half-fare for persons under 18. Well, now
Jean-Claude had just turned 18 three months ago so he
lied..a bit. And got a ticket for $100.
Well during the flight, he talking with the passenger
seated next to him. And, in the course of their little
chat, he boisterously mentioned the 18th birthday party
his friends had for him. Since Jean-Claude talked
fairly loudly, a stewardess happened to over-hear
that part of the conversation and remembered from the
passenger list that Jean-Claude had only paid
half-fare. A few minutes later, the stewardess asked
Jean-Claude if he had $50 with him.
Jean-Claude, slightly embarrassed, replied, "I only
have $10, enough for a bus and a coffee after we arrive
in Boston.. Why you ask?"
Stewardess:"I wanted to know if you wanted to buy this
used parachute."
Jean-Claude, "What for?"
Stewardess, "You only paid half-fare and you're over
18. We are half-way on our flight and you have to leave
now."
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the internet cloud is not where you think

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A passenger train in California is creeping along, slowly.
Finally it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor
walking by outside.
"What's going on?" she yells out the window.
"Cow on the track!" replies the conductor.
Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace.
Within five minutes, however, it stops again. The
woman sees the same conductor walk again.
She leans out the window and yells, "What happened?
Did we catch up with the cow again?"
----------------
Yeah, I remember a train like that in Austria.
It had little porches at each end of the wagons
and signs posted: "Picking flowers while the train
is in motion is not permitted."
Seems the locomotive engineer got annoyed when the
flower pickers passed the train.
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Noella's Blunders
Out of Cascade? Wanna know what happens when you use about
a quarter-cup full of Dawn dish soap in the dishwasher?
Well, I did one day!
I'm in my bedroom curling my hair to go somewhere, and I
hear one of the twins in the kitchen. "Uh, Noella? I think
you need to come in here."
"Why? You guys need to get ready."
"Uh, Noella? There's suds all over the floor, Lots of suds,
they're covering the whole floor!"
I groan, walk into the kitchen, and sure enough, there ARE
suds all over the floor. They're headed for the computer sitting
on the floor just a few feet away.
The boys bring lots of towels from the bathroom and I call my
husband, who is laughing his head off. His solution - get out
my Rainbow (dust and dirt is sucked into a container of water)
and start vacuuming the water out.
You know what happens when you vacuum suds with a Rainbow?
The motor starts sounding funny. So, I shut it off and open it,
to find that it took the water out of the dishwasher okay but
now suds are way up in the motor. I did remember the salesman
told us that if that ever happened, disconnect from the water
housing and run dry. Now not only is the floor still covered
with suds, there's more water plus oil on the floor. And we've
got to be somewhere in just a few minutes!
Moral of the story is - unless you want to use LOTS of towels
to sop up water, never, ever use Dawn dish soap in your
dishwasher!
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Someone had a lot of time on their hands centuries ago!

Today, October 28, in
1636 Harvard College was founded in Massachusetts.
1776 The Battle of White Plains took place during the
American Revolutionary War.
1793 Eli Whitney applied for a patent for his cotton gin.
1886 The Statue of Liberty was dedicated in New York Harbor
by U.S. President Cleveland. The statue weighs 225 tons and
is 152 feet tall. It was originally known as "Liberty
Enlightening the World."
1904 The St. Louis Police Department became the first to use
fingerprinting.
1919 The U.S. Congress enacted the Volstead Act, also known
as the National Prohibition Act. Prohibition was repealed in
1933 with the passing of the 21st Amendment to the U.S.
Constitution.
1922 Benito Mussolini took control of the Italian government
and introduced fascism to Italy.
1940 During World War II, Italy invaded Greece.
1962 Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev informed the U.S. that
he had ordered the dismantling of Soviet missile bases in Cuba.
1965 Pope Paul VI issued a decree absolving Jews of collective
guilt for the crucifixion of Jesus Christ.
1965 The Gateway Arch along the waterfront in St. Louis, MO,
was completed.
1976 John D. Erlichman, a former aide to U.S. President Richard
Nixon, entered a federal prison camp in Safford, AZ, to begin
serving his sentence for Watergate-related convictions.
1983 The U.S. vetoed a U.N. Security Council resolution "deeply
deploring" the ongoing U.S.-led invasion of Grenada.
1985 John A. Walker Jr. and his son, Michael Lance Walker, pled
guilty to charges of spying for the Soviet Union.
1988 Roussel Uclaf, a French manufacturer that produces the abortion
pill RU486, announced it would resume distribution of the drug
after the government of France demanded it do so.
1990 Iraq announced that it was halting gasoline rationing.
1993 Ousted Haitian President Jean-Bertrand Aristide, called for a
complete blockade of Haiti to force out the military leaders.
1994 U.S. President Clinton visited Kuwait and implied that all the
troops there would be home by Christmas.
2015 smiled.