Upon arrival at the Pearly Gates, a man is greeted by St. Peter.
"What have you done to warrant admission?" asks St. Peter.
"Well," says the man, "I was driving in the desert, when I saw a bunch of Hell's Angels about to rape a young woman. I stopped and told them to stop. But they ignored me. So I jumped out of my car. I picked out the toughest looking biker. I went up to him and spat in his face. Then I punched him the stomach. I stomped on his foot. I ripped out his nose ring."
"Very impressive," says St. Peter. "When did all this happen?"
"Just a couple of minutes ago."