I had to leave out some badass sentences I wrote for an article because they just didn’t fit. It sucked, but the piece was better for it overall. Here’s another baby that I (this time accidentally) left out of a recent article: “Her smile is practiced, but her eyes are alert and sincere.” (Also, infanticide.)

WISDOM:

All the coolest people are dead.

Duh.

STUPID:

I don’t drink tequila, but if I did I would put gummi worms in it. (not a metaphor)

Since I wrote this, I have drunk a little tequila. Unfortunately there were no gummi worms around.

That concludes this episode of “This Is Twittering: Meta-commentary Digest”.