How Rebbetzin Heller Changed My Life

In memory of Rabbi Dovid Heller, of blessed memory.

The first time I met Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller I was newly married, newly arrived in Israel and newly miserable. I was struggling with my career. I was struggling with my identity as a wife. I was struggling with my beliefs.

I went to a number of different classes searching for answers. But I was rapidly becoming frustrated because I couldn't seem to relate to any of the lectures. Having just graduated from the University of Pennsylvania, I was bored and unconvinced in every class that I found, even though I desperately wanted to absorb all the beautiful ideas and values. And then I walked into Rebbetzin Heller's class.

I was late and tried to slide inconspicuously into a seat in the back, but she looked up at me and stopped speaking for a second. "Welcome," she said, giving me her signature smile with her sea green eyes lighting up with warmth. And then she continued to teach. It took me about five minutes to realize how brilliant the Rebbetzin was. And it wasn't just the depth of her wisdom; her values were authentic and strong. Sometimes she would be telling a story about some person who performed an incredible act of kindness and her eyes would fill up with tears that she never let flow.

I followed her from class to class like a parched wanderer desperate for water. I asked hundreds of questions; she encouraged me and answered me with endless patience and attention. In those first hard months, she gave me strength when mine was gone. She gave me vision when I couldn't see beyond today. She gave me content when I was stuck on the surfaces.

Rebbetzin Heller's words cut through all of my excuses and poured into my soul.

And I remember one stunning, Jerusalem morning, sitting in the second row, when her words pierced my heart. At the time my husband and I were struggling with whether we should start a family; I wasn't sure if I wanted children yet. Rebbetzin Heller's words that day, which I afterwards reviewed in one of her books, Our Bodies, Our Souls, cut through all of my excuses and poured into my soul: "While one can give to society in innumerable ways, bringing new humans into existence and imbuing them with spiritual values ensures the perpetuation of everything that makes life worth living. It is the most fundamental contribution one can make to the world."

Until then I had thought that the most significant contribution I could make to the world would be through my career. I had defined myself and my goals in terms of how successful I was professionally. Within that framework, children would only get in the way and make life harder. But I walked out of that class and thought about the Rebbetzin's words. What really made life worth living? Later that afternoon I read further: "The Hebrew word for children, banim, comes from the same root as the verb banah, build. Mothering allows a woman to directly and experientially address the aspects of herself that are most Godly and thus build herself... Religious Jews value souls coming into the world both for the good of each soul (which now has the opportunity to rectify and perfect itself) and for the fulfillment of the mission of the Jewish people, to which each soul is expected to contribute." (Our Bodies, Our Souls, 134-135)

I wanted that kind of greatness; I wanted to build. I wanted everything that ultimately makes life worth living. And if someone like Rebbetzin Heller could raise 14 children and become the Torah powerhouse that she is today, then perhaps the ideas that I previously had about motherhood needed some amending. That’s how Rebbetzin Heller inspired us to have our first child.

The Heller Home

But it didn't end there. Throughout the following years as we were blessed with more children and I was working to complete my Master’s degree, I ran to Rebbetzin Heller's classes for oxygen. I continued to ask and search. She continued to teach. I didn't think she even knew my name.

One day, while I was writing a research paper and feeding my baby, the phone rang. Absentmindedly, I picked it up.

"Hi Sara? It's Tziporah."

I didn't have any friends named Tziporah; I had no idea who was calling.

"I wanted to know if you and your family can join us for Friday night dinner."

The voice sounded so familiar. Where was it from? And then it hit me. "Rebbetzin Heller?! Is that you?"

"Yes, can you come?"

After I hung up the phone, I called my husband who was equally surprised. "I wonder how she got our number."

That Friday night we walked down the moonlit streets of Har Nof with our three little girls in their strollers and a bottle of wine. When Rebbetzin Heller opened the door, the aroma of chicken soup and fresh challah enveloped us. Her children were laughing on the couch with her husband, Rabbi Dovid Heller. The apartment was bare except for: the couch, the beautifully set Shabbos table, the candlesticks and cabinets full of Torah books. In the kitchen sat an old urn and an ancient hot plate, but the warmth all around me shone through the simplicity.

When Rabbi Heller stood up to say kiddush, I looked up at the pure Sabbath lights reflected in the window, and I thought: This is the most beautiful home I have ever seen. Throughout the meal, the Rabbi and Rebbetzin sat beside each other at the head of the table while their children served. The Rabbi's smile lit up the room as he spoke softly with his Rebbetzin, his children and my husband. I kept waiting for a speech of some sort that I was sure either the Rabbi or Rebbetzin would make, but it never came. Instead, Rebbetzin Heller held my baby almost the entire meal, the Rabbi asked my husband about his work and his background, and he told stories to his captivated children that imparted Jewish wisdom.

I have never again witnessed such an extraordinary marriage. The peace and the love between the Rabbi and Rebbetzin could literally be felt in the room. Neither of them overshadowed or interrupted the other. The children looked up to them and gathered around them like vessels waiting to be filled with the overflow of their pure connection to each other.

On the way home, I asked my husband if he knew where the Rabbi worked. He shook his head.

"He didn't talk at all about himself. But I thought he was brilliant. I wonder if he teaches."

Rabbi Heller ran far away from honor. His primary motivation was to serve God with humility and modesty.

I didn't find out what Rabbi Dovid Heller ztz"l did until yesterday when he passed away rather suddenly from a stroke. I didn't find out that he was the administrator of Yeshivas Pachad Yitzchak for over 20 years. I didn't find out until yesterday how he was known in his neighborhood as a man who pursued acts of kindness the way others seek riches, whose gentle countenance and wisdom changed the lives of countless individuals. But I'm not surprised. The extraordinary modesty and depth of his character came through when he sat at the head of the table next to his beloved Rebbetzin. It came through when he laughed with his children on his living room couch. It came through the purity of his voice when he made kiddush. It was clear to me that this was a man who ran far away from honor, whose primary motivation was to do the will of God, with humility and modesty.

When I heard that Rabbi Heller passed away yesterday, I was sitting with my children at the dinner table. I walked to the kitchen window and looked out at the sun sinking through the trees on a horizon that looked like it had just been set on fire. I felt my eyes fill with tears as I thought of my teacher, my mentor, my hero. The horrific loss that she must be feeling right now as the other half of her soul moves on to the next world.

I looked back at my children and their questioning eyes. And I thought: "Rebbetzin, I can't imagine what you are going through, but I am praying for you. Just like you prayed for me and for all of your students. And all of these precious children around my dinner table are here because of you. All of the goodness and truth that fills my home is here because of you. Your extraordinary marriage, your children and your grandchildren continue to light up the world in ways you can't even imagine. May God comfort you among the mourners of Jerusalem. May your husband's pure, lofty soul rise higher and higher through everything that you have built together."

Featured at Aish.com:

About the Author

Sara Debbie Gutfreund received her BA in English from the University of Pennsylvania and her MA in Family Therapy from the University of North Texas. She has taught parenting classes and self-development seminars and provided adolescent counseling. She writes extensively for many online publications and in published anthologies of Jewish women's writing. She and her husband spent 14 wonderful years raising their five children in Israel, and now live in Blue Ridge Estates in Waterbury, Connecticut, where Sara Debbie enjoys skiing and running in her free time.

Visitor Comments: 31

(29)
Chaya Sarah Stark,
October 16, 2013 3:12 AM

review of the article

Thank you for putting into words what so many of us feel. Rebbetzin Heller's loss is our loss, as she has had such a profound impact on so many of our lives. We owe a great debt of gratitude to Rabbi Heller A"H for being the "wind beneath the Rebbetzin's wings " and allosing so many of us to benefit from the Torah that she taught us. Thanks again

(28)
Aliza Miriam,
October 14, 2013 6:01 PM

Beautifully written and poignant; expresses the heartfelt thoughts of many...

Thank you!

(27)
Paul Stoller,
October 9, 2013 10:46 PM

Well said

One of the best little gems I have ever read. A touching tribute so clearly true despite the regret I have not heard of this pious pair until now.

(26)
Yehudit Spero,
October 8, 2013 6:09 PM

The influence of the Heller family

This was such a moving and well written piece. It was a a hesped ,in a sense, for Rabbi Heller ztl whose loss all of Am Yisroel will feel. May Hashem watch over their dear family.I hope the author and her family will return to Israel. You will be a wonderful addition to the people liviing here>

(25)
Sharon,
October 8, 2013 7:23 AM

without compensation

Along with dozens of other women in Jerusalem, I regularly attended Mrs. Heller's classes held in her home in Maalot Daphna. At some point I asked Mrs. Heller if she would like me to collect payment from each woman, since the class was free of charge. She told me she would talk it over with her husband. When I asked her the following week, she told me that her husband and she agreed that this one class would be her contribution without payment since her other classes in Neveh were her formal salaried job.I remember til this day, many of her ideas including ones that I can no longer accept. But overall, she gave me food for thought.

(24)
Anonymous,
October 7, 2013 10:13 PM

inspiring

I had the privilege to attend a class that Rebbetzin Heller gave during my Aish GEM trip and she inspired me so much. A wonderful woman and I am so sorry to hear about her loss.

(23)
michael goldstein,
October 7, 2013 10:01 PM

affecting lives

This is truly a wonderful thank you expressed so eloquently-to meet people like the Hellers and to be so inspired-I too look forward to more stories about this special couple who illuminate other lives

(22)
Laura,
October 7, 2013 12:00 PM

All during our lives we meet lots of people, only a few, like Mr. Heller, make a difference and change our hearts.

(21)
Samrah,
October 6, 2013 11:41 PM

What a beautiful and sad story

I was reading your story I never heard of the Rabbi or the Rebbetzin Heller but you surely
created inside of me a big regret for never meet
This wonderful couple ... Then I was reading and
Learned the Rabbi passed I jump from the couch
is with tears in my heart and soul I offer you my
Condolences may the Rabbi rest in peace
And I am sure Mississ Heller you will continue his
Legacy !
May G-d bless you and your family !
Amen !

(20)
Yocheved Woolf Heiligman,
October 6, 2013 9:27 PM

Condolences

Dear Mrs Heller,Though my opportunities to see you have been rare,(most recently in Baltimore at the Women's Torah Institute a few years back) you always remain in my heart, and I am so sorry to hear of your loss. May Rabbi Heller's memory be a blessing and the sacred work of his hands long endure.

(19)
Ruchie Aloof,
October 6, 2013 6:58 PM

I had the opportunity to go to Prague for a shabbos with Rebbetzin Heller. Each discussion intrigued me more. Here sheer brilliance was astounding. She shared a story that has stated with me and has offered tremendous chizuk over the past few years. She was telling of a young girl trying to make sense of past misdeeds. The message was as long as she was in the path of teshuva that she could turn the page or better yet close the book. That advice has helped me move forward on my constant journey toward Torah and mitzvot.
My heartfelt condolences go out to Rebbetzin and the entire Heller family. May HaShem comfort you and assist you in moving on from this tremendous loss.

Michy,
October 7, 2013 2:15 PM

Is this story or speech available online?

Ruchie, your comments struck a chord and I'd love to hear or read the Rebbetzin'swords on making sense of or forgiving oneself for past misdeeds. Do you know if this is available online? Thanks!

(18)
lynn finson,
October 6, 2013 6:02 PM

Thank You for articulating this testimony of hakarat hatov

I was saddened with the the rest of Jerusalem to hear of the loss of Rabbi Dovid Heller zt'l . This article so aptly describes what we are all trying to achieve in our marriages and with Hakados Baruch Hu -, " connection, " May Hashem grant Rebbetzin Heller and her beautiful family comfort amongst the mourners of Zion and Yerushalayim. May they know no more tzaar.

(17)
Anonymous,
October 6, 2013 5:42 PM

Role Models

As a student at Neve, I was fortunate to be a guest at their Shabbat table several times. Rabbi and Rebbetzin Heller embodied that "oneness" that every marriage should strive to reach. They respected each other, joked with one another, challenged each other on Torah, cared for each other, they were both baalei chessids, who led their lives with integrity, kindness, caring for others and Torah. I'm so grateful to have met them and to have be given the opportunity to have them serve as my role models.

(16)
Anonymous,
October 6, 2013 5:09 PM

This was such a beautiful article written describing the spiritual beauty of how the Hellers created their home. I had the opportunity many times to hear the words of Torah, hashkafa, and guidance from Rebbitzen Heller at Neve Yerushalayim from over 15 years ago. Now, I barely have time to get to a shiur outside of my home, but when I hear that Rebbitzen Heller is speaking , I always try and get there to hear her pearls of wisdom. I've quoted her many times in my counseling with others. When I heard of the passing of R. Dovid Heller ztz"l, my heart sank, just imagining what the Rebbitzen must be experiencing. I pray that Rebbitzen Heller and her family should be comforted amongst the mourners of Zion, and I extend my deepest condolences to all of you.

(15)
Anonymous,
October 6, 2013 2:46 PM

A beautiful tribute

This is a most beautful tribute to Rav Heller and also beautifuly written

(14)
Reuven Frank,
October 6, 2013 1:01 PM

HaMakom

I knew both the Heller's when I was learning at Ohr Somayach around 1980. Rebbitzen Heller looked so young, I thought she was one of the children.I had several interactions with both the Heller's. When Rav Dovid ztz"l came into the kitchen to help finish cooking the Friday night meal.When the Rebbitzen Tlit"a made Havdala because R. Dovid was away in the US raising funds for the Yeshiva.I understand that men don't pay Shiva calls to women, but maybe the Rebbitzen will see this:HaMakom Yenachem Eschem B'soch Shar Aveilei Tzion V'Y'rushalayim, V"Lo Tosifu L'Da'ava Od

(13)
Anonymous,
October 6, 2013 10:40 AM

Condolences from Australia

Dear Rebbetzin Heller and Family

May you be comforted amongst the mourners of Tzion and Yerushalim"So sorry to hear of the passing of your late Husband and Father

From a regular reader here in Australia

(12)
Zissi,
October 6, 2013 1:27 AM

Condolences to Rebetzin Heller from former student

My condolences to Rebetzin Heller and her family-your husband was a great man. May his neshama have an aliya.

(11)
Chana Miriam Zelasko,
October 5, 2013 6:05 PM

Shabbos Seudah

Rebbetzin Heller was my Chumash teacher 36 years ago in Neve. I also was zoche to be a guest by them for Shabbos that year, and I remember the beautiful Shabbos Seudas I had by them. I even remember what Rabbi Heller z"l discussed at the Seudah. May the family know of no more sorrow.

(10)
Anonymous,
October 4, 2013 1:38 PM

Very sad news

As a student who was given access to on-line studies at Naaleh by Rabbi Heller, I cannot express how sad this news makes me. I spoke with Rabbi Heller twice and was deeply impressed by his candid warmth and openness. It is obvious that this spiritual power couple have been role models for hundreds, if not thousands, in the Jewish community. To the author, your writing illustrates the impact of Rebbeztin Heller's teaching on you. This is a beautiful tribute. She has obviously taught you well. ITo Rebbetzin Heller, you are beloved. So many want to help and extend themselves to you right now. May you be comforted by your family and may those of us who were touched by you indirectly through studies, present deeds in this world that are worthy of your example. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

(9)
Anonymous,
October 4, 2013 12:53 PM

Rebbetzin Heller, an amazing guide

There are literally hundreds of free classes by Rebbetzin Heller at Naaleh.com. She has a remarkable breadth of knowledge in Torah, teaching a surprisingly great range of topics with unique clarity. She also gives strength to her students and listeners with great wisdom (& happens to have a pretty fabulous sense of humor too!) She is an important resource and guide especially in these turbulent times.

(8)
reuven,
October 4, 2013 11:07 AM

Rabbi

In the 80's I had the honor to be in Ohr Somayach shiurim of Rabbi Heller z'TL- well polished weaving lectures of an international speaker are not the most accurate adjectives I would use- every shiur conveyed pure Love of the Al-Mighty and torah the hug engulfs each one of us as individuals and as Hashem's nation etc- NOTHING more important- has he proved by making his parnassa from running the yeshiva culinary. Since then when there were events around the Rebbetzin, I would run to the Rabbi to ask him questions- over the years the twinkle in his eye glared ever brighter as he looked up to his father- the Al-Mighty as if He was right there- answers would not flow like poetry but any body could feel the message and connection from the Al-Mighty. Maybe there are still other grey haired people like myself feel famished from such rare wellsprings of pure Ahavas Hashem without any glitz or glamore. ..... wo to Kllal Yisroel who no longer has the merit to have Rabbi Heller

(7)
Anonymous,
October 4, 2013 12:38 AM

Rebbetizin Heller, exceptional teacher

Rebbetzin Heller was teaching classes each week in the apartment below the apartment I just happened to pick to rent off a one time search on the internet. I am sure it was no accident I rented that apartment and was invited to attend her classes. Heartfelt, connecting truths. Very real and simply exceptional teaching. Strong woman. Sorry to hear of her husband's passing.

(6)
Aliza,
October 3, 2013 10:22 PM

Wow

Thank you for this beautifully written article, learning about such incredible human beings and their marriage isinspiring.

(5)
shira Mathias,
October 3, 2013 5:57 PM

Thank you for writing

I have been waiting to hear something about Rabbi Heller z'l ever since I heard of his passing. I have been thinking of the Rebbetzin and your beautiful article has filled in some details about this giant of a man. Thank you!

Mordechai Shuali,
October 4, 2013 1:28 PM

His Greatest Act of Kindness

It is said of the great Steipler Gaon, Rabbi Y. Y. Kanievsky, that the greatest miracle he performed was that he learned Torah for its own sake for 40 (50, 60, 70) years. In a similar vein, Rabbi Heller zt"l, whom I met in the early 80's and saw and spoke to on a yearly or twice yearly basis for 15-16 years, performed such wonders. That he was involved in countless acts of kindness is well known; Rebbe, fund raiser, Rosh Kollel, Kitchen manager, and his wife's equal partner in a one-man/one-woman kiruv organization (the Heller Home). What is far less known is the even greater kindness he did through his Torah learning. His vast knowledge and tremendous hasmodah (diligence) and ahavas HaTorah (love of/for the Torah) was known to few, but affected thousands. He was a true Talmid Chocham and studied, reviewed, and understood, perhaps mastered, a wide range of Torah subjects; halachic (legal), aggadic (which are among other things ethical lessons taught poetically using much symbolism through stories in the Talmud), and philosophic. Many people were unaware of his vast knowledge in these area; his humility and dedication to doing for others did not allow this to be shown. But I was privileged to get a glimpse of it once or twice and one of my children, who saw Rabbi Heller on a daily basis for close to a decade, confirmed this. There is no Shabbos or Yom Tov I don't think of him as he taught me a perhaps little known halachah (law) about how bread is to be cut and which I follow to this very day. There are certainly many, more people who owe so much to him. Physical bodies cast shadows, and as the body moves so does the shadow. Sometimes it is difficult to tell what is the body and what is the shadow. In the case of the Hellers, who as noted above both sat at the head of the table, there was one body and all whom they touched were their shadows. Y'hi zichro baruch.
NB - I have no objection, indeed would appreciate it, if this was forwarded to the Rebbetzin,

(4)
Anonymous,
October 3, 2013 2:32 PM

Thank you to the author...

I can attest to the remarkable sense of shalom bayis they seemed to embody together. As I balaas teshuva at Neve for a number of years & being in many, many different people's homes then for Shabbos seudas, I'll never forget the Shabbos seuda when I was in the Heller's home. Perhaps they just needed the extra room as the table was filled with guests, nonetheless, they sat together at one head of the table. They were more relaxed than I'm used to seeing people in our day. Their smiles were very youthful. At one point they were laughing together, not in a loud boisterous way, but in a pleasant quiet way & I could've sworn she had tears in her eyes from her quiet laughter. From tehillim, perek 97, 11 "...ulyishrei leiv simcha" "& for the upright of heart, simcha". What a special family, a light unto the nations. My heart goes out to her very much.

(3)
Yisroel Tzvi Serebrowski,
October 3, 2013 12:11 PM

Heartbreak

Oh so powerful. and heartbreaking. From one who had the merit of hosting the Rebbetzin multiple times for Shabbatonim in the Cherry Hill community our collective hearts go out to the Rebbetzin and family in their time of tzara. Rebbetzin, we have been inspired by you and we hope that the worlds of merit that you have created around the world will help to assuage your unfathomable pain at this most difficult time. May Hashem give you the strength to carry on in your holy work until the time when He will send Moshiach and we will all be reunited with our dear departed loved ones.

(2)
Lisa,
October 3, 2013 11:00 AM

" Just" a Rabbi....who showed kindness...his only agenda was GD

No coincidence that this tzadeck, Rabbi Heller, (Z"L) passed away on Parshat Noach, where we read about another tzadeck!

I live in rural Montana where the Cholov Yisrael milk is difficult to obtain and very expensive. So I drink regular milk. What is your view on this?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Jewish law requires that there be rabbinic supervision during the milking process to ensure that the milk comes from a kosher animal. In the United States, many people rely on the Department of Agriculture's regulations and controls as sufficiently stringent to fulfill the rabbinic requirement for supervision.

Most of the major Kashrut organizations in the United States rely on this as well. You will therefore find many kosher products in America certified with a 'D' next to the kosher symbol. Such products – unless otherwise specified on the label – are not Cholov Yisrael and are assumed kosher based on the DOA's guarantee.

There are many, however, do not rely on this, and will eat only dairy products that are designated as Cholov Yisrael (literally, "Jewish milk"). This is particularly true in large Jewish communities, where Cholov Yisrael is widely available.

Rabbi Moshe Feinstein wrote that under limited conditions, such as an institution which consumes a lot of milk and Cholov Yisrael is generally unavailable or especially expensive, American milk is acceptable, as the government supervision is adequate to prevent non-kosher ingredients from being added.

It should be added that the above only applies to milk itself, which is marketed as pure cow's milk. All other dairy products, such as cheeses and butter, may contain non-kosher ingredients and always require kosher certification. In addition, Rabbi Feinstein's ruling applies only in the United States, where government regulations are considered reliable. In other parts of the world, including Europe, Cholov Yisrael is a requirement.

There are additional esoteric reasons for being stringent regarding Cholov Yisrael, and because of this it is generally advisable to consume only Cholov Yisroel dairy foods.

In 1889, 800 Jews arrived in Buenos Aires, marking the birth of the modern Jewish community in Argentina. These immigrants were fleeing poverty and pogroms in Russia, and moved to Argentina because of its open door policy of immigration. By 1920, more than 150,000 Jews were living in Argentina. Juan Peron's rise to power in 1946 was an ominous sign, as he was a Nazi sympathizer with fascist leanings. Peron halted Jewish immigration to Argentina, introduced mandatory Catholic religious instruction in public schools, and allowed Argentina to become a haven for fleeing Nazis. (In 1960, Israeli agents abducted Adolf Eichmann from a Buenos Aires suburb.) Today, Argentina has the largest Jewish community in Latin America with 250,000, though terror attacks have prompted many young people to emigrate. In 1992, the Israeli Embassy in Buenos Aires was bombed, killing 32 people. In 1994, the Jewish community headquarters in Buenos Aires was bombed, killing 85 people. The perpetrators have never been apprehended.

Be aware of what situations and behaviors give you pleasure. When you feel excessively sad and cannot change your attitude, make a conscious effort to take some action that might alleviate your sadness.

If you anticipate feeling sad, prepare a list of things that might make you feel better. It could be talking to a specific enthusiastic individual, running, taking a walk in a quiet area, looking at pictures of family, listening to music, or reading inspiring words.

While our attitude is a major factor in sadness, lack of positive external situations and events play an important role in how we feel.

[If a criminal has been executed by hanging] his body may not remain suspended overnight ... because it is an insult to God (Deuteronomy 21:23).

Rashi explains that since man was created in the image of God, anything that disparages man is disparaging God as well.

Chilul Hashem, bringing disgrace to the Divine Name, is one of the greatest sins in the Torah. The opposite of chilul Hashem is kiddush Hashem, sanctifying the Divine Name. While this topic has several dimensions to it, there is a living kiddush Hashem which occurs when a Jew behaves in a manner that merits the respect and admiration of other people, who thereby respect the Torah of Israel.

What is chilul Hashem? One Talmudic author stated, "It is when I buy meat from the butcher and delay paying him" (Yoma 86a). To cause someone to say that a Torah scholar is anything less than scrupulous in meeting his obligations is to cause people to lose respect for the Torah.

Suppose someone offers us a business deal of questionable legality. Is the personal gain worth the possible dishonor that we bring not only upon ourselves, but on our nation? If our personal reputation is ours to handle in whatever way we please, shouldn't we handle the reputation of our nation and the God we represent with maximum care?

Jews have given so much, even their lives, for kiddush Hashem. Can we not forego a few dollars to avoid chilul Hashem?

Today I shall...

be scrupulous in all my transactions and relationships to avoid the possibility of bringing dishonor to my God and people.

With stories and insights,
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