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Random Musings

It is impossible to avoid. It stalks your every move. It haunts your dreams, daydreams, and nightmares.

And what is this demon you may ask? The dreaded question. The question that begins to gnaw at the back of your mind beginning in high school.

“What is your passion?” — which inherently translates to: “What were you put on this earth to do?” “What will make you feel fulfilled?” “What will be you contribution to the human race?”

Has anyone in the history of forever actually discovered the answer to this question? (Not posthumously!) Does a One True Passion even exist? It is easy to look back on influential people’s lives and say: “Yes! That was their passion! That was their calling! They were so lucky to know what they wanted to do with their life.”

But do these people just wake up one day and know what they’re meant to do with their lives? No, I don’t think so. We put so much pressure on ourselves to hone in on that One True Passion that we miss so much along the way. The people who appear to live the most passionate lives are not constantly worrying about finding their “passion” or missing out on their one true calling. They are just living and striving to be their most authentic selves.

Photo by Jared Rice on Unsplash

So, what does that mean for you? For me, it means changing the way I think about life and the future. If I am constantly living ten years from nowinstead of the present, I am not truly living. I choose to live in the here and now, embracing each day and the unique opportunities it brings. Join me?

What to write? What can I write that will change the world, touch someone’s soul, save their life, give them a reason to keep on going. It would be so easy to give up. Just open social media; turn on the TV — the world is exploding. Annihilating our insignificant lives one by one.

One person commits an act of kindness? Ten more commit murder. How do we keep on? Why do we keep on?

Because to stop is to surrender. To give up is accepting the worst of humanity. We are more than this. We are more than our worst mistakes and faults. We need to find our souls again. We need to seek what binds us together, not what tears us apart.

We need to be kind. We need to love. We need to accept.

I alone cannot change the world, but perhaps together, we can begin to heal. We can take steps forward instead of ten steps back.

I ask you: What makes us the same, not different? Name one thing; it can be anything, that unites, not separates. And then name another, then another, and another. Never stop. Maybe then, the world will change.

Feel free to comment your own thoughts on how we are all more alike than we are different. It could be one word, or a paragraph, whatever you feel is right. Let’s change the narrative.

If I could sum it up in one word: refreshing. The movie featured four women as the main characters. Yep, you heard that right: four women. The only main male character was a ditzy, but sexy, receptionist. Sound familiar? The ditzy, sexy (almost always female) receptionist is all too common in the film industry, but Ghostbusters turned the stereotypes of Hollywood on its head. The four female characters are allowed to have brains, be passionate about their careers, pursue their desires, and not once feature a love interest (besides commenting on the attractiveness of said ditzy receptionist which doesn’t really count.) And for once, the women rescue the man! Because, yes, sometimes men need rescuing too.

Also, the women were hilarious! The old sexist stereotype of having too many women in one room definitely does not apply to this highly entertaining film. The four women got along splendidly! And Ghostbusters finally proved that yes, women can be funny too!

As a woman watching this movie, I found it so incredibly refreshing. On the screen were women pursuing their passions, not letting anything stop them, doing what they wanted, being brave, and doing it all without the help of a man. Now, I’m not saying anything against men; I love my husband! But it is wonderful to finally see a big movie portraying women how most women actually see themselves (or hope for themselves), not how the media traditionally frames them.

So if you haven’t gone to see Ghostbusters yet, GO NOW! It definitely will not disappoint.

I am downloading PokemonGo. But not to catch Pokemon. The app has been live for a week now and already become a worldwide phenomenon. I’m seeing even more people than usual hunched over their phones, running across streets, going on long walks, and taking the long way home to try to catch them all. And don’t even get me started on the endless Facebook posts about that one rare Pokemon they found. Frankly, I think you’re all nerds and it’s very annoying. (It’s okay, though, I’m a nerd too; just nerdy about different things.)

BUT my husband and I went on a walk last night, and I begrudgingly admit that the app can be useful in fulfilling a certain passion of mine: travel! The app has made all important tourist locations, historic buildings, monuments, museums, etc. a “Pokestop” where trainers can stock up on Pokeballs and other apparently essential items. (I really have no idea what the Pokemon world entails.) Also, for those of us who are directionally challenged, the app features a map that is quite helpful in planning your route. PokemonGo has literally forced players to wake up to the world around them and explore. And I am all for that! We discovered a quaint museum on our walk last night we didn’t even know existed in our small town, and we plan on going back sometime when it’s open.

So, yes, I have finally caved. I will download PokemonGo. But not to only catch Pokemon, but rather to discover new and exciting places to explore. Bon Voyage Pokemon trainers! May the odds be ever in your favor…or I guess may you catch them all? I don’t even know…but I guess I am soon to find out!

This blog is primarily about travel: both the physical and inner journey. I believe the journeys and adventures we embark on while stationary are just as important. I mentioned in my last post that I have just recently gotten married. Yesterday marked three whole weeks of marriage for Quinton and I! (Hey, we’ve made it farther than some couples!) While I readily admit we know little of marriage as of yet (and this post may seem naive to some), I thought I would just share a few of my thoughts on marriage so far.

Being wedding season, I have seen many posts outlining the difficulties and hardships of marriage, but how it is so worth it in the end, etc… While I admit that some days have been harder than others, our marriage has been quite easy and enjoyable so far. (Maybe because it’s what they call “the honeymoon phase”? I’m not sure yet…) Either way, I think it is important to brag about just how awesome marriage can be too. This is the time to build up and cherish all the ooey-gooey romantic moments. Then when bad days do come along, which I know they will, you will have a solid foundation. Keeping in mind that the good days far outnumber the bad days will help keep life in perspective.

Marriage is like a long sleepover. With some added perks, of course. Wink, wink 😉 Just like with the girls back in middle school, you spend evenings watching movies, making and consuming food together, picking out each other’s outfits, then get up and go to school the next day (or in our case, work). Sometimes you fight, give each other the silent treatment, vent to other friends, but you eventually make up and go eat some more food and repeat.

Quinton summed up one of the most important lessons we’ve learned so far (one that we actually learned even before we got married):

“We’ve learned how to dislike each other.”

Yup, you read that right. Sometimes I really, really, really don’t like my husband! And I know sometimes he really doesn’t like me. And that is totally okay. Why? Because if we liked each other all the time then we’re not pushing one another. We’re not learning and growing and moving forward as individuals and as a couple. We would be static and complacent, which frankly is quite boring and the complete polar opposite of traveling. I do enjoy a good healthy argument sometimes; keeps us on our toes and always moving forward!

So yes, marriage is difficult sometimes, but most of the time it is easy and wonderful! I get to see my best friend every day and share this journey with him. What could be better than that?

In the span of only two months, I have graduated college, moved into a new home, started working full-time, and got married. Only three days back from our honeymoon, and I am definitely starting to experience what I term the “post-event slump.”

Parents, teachers, friends, and society-at-large all drilled into my head the importance of college. While my college experience was less than desirable, I stuck it out to the end. I have a degree! I can now check that off my life to-do list.

Next up, my fiance and I put a deposit down on our first home together. A town home, mind you, but still an investment. We moved into our new place the weekend after my college graduation. Find a place to live: check!

About two weeks after moving, I was bumped up to full-time at my previously part-time job. (All this while planning my wedding, of course.)

Then two weeks after that, we got married and drove to Florida for our honeymoon on the beach and Disney World. It was an absolutely magical time!

We have been home for three days, and today was my first day back at work. While I am extremely happy to be married and very much in love with my husband, I still find myself feeling glum. Why is this? Shouldn’t I be jumping with joy? I have achieved all my life goals! Or so society seems to tell me. But all these life goals: college, marriage, a nice home, etc. happened in only four years! Now what do I do with the rest of my life? How am I supposed to find out what I want to do? What comes next? What do I want to come next?

When big events like these happen in our lives, it’s hard to return to the everyday grind of life. We find ourselves feeling dissatisfied and bored. When did we lose the ability to just exist and live our lives not worrying about what happens next? (Or have we EVER had that ability?) Because no matter our best efforts, our lives will likely not go as planned. I know mine sure hasn’t, but I am very happy with where I ended up so far. So why am I experiencing so much anxiety for the future?

As I embark on my first few weeks of married life (which if I’m honest, does not feel that much different from before besides maybe more awesome sex), I am attempting to live each day to the fullest, even the ones I spend at work, cleaning, grocery shopping, paying bills…

I have a feeling my life will be wonderful no matter how much or how little time I put into pinpointing my plans for the future. I am just going to (try!) to sit back and enjoy the ride!