Tag: observations

Everyone has seen the movie The Lion King, and everyone knows the villain, a devious lion called Scar. He is one of Disney’s most prominent villains (and that is partly because he is voiced by the marvelous [and British] Jeremy Irons) because he is evil with a hint of charm. Come on! If anybody ever said that Scar isn’t charming in a scary sort of way, I would have sharp words with them.

We all remember the scene where he sings the gratuitous villain song, “Be Prepared”. Before he starts singing, Scar is explaining his plan to the hyenas and they just aren’t getting it. He puts his paw to his temple and mutters, “I’m surrounded by idiots.” How many times have we done that since we matured? A lot, we all know that at least. There are moments in life where we are surprised by the sheer stupidity of a situation or a person.

Since I have grown up (and become more dry witted with age, kind of like a good wine), I have become less tolerant of stupidity in all its forms. Of course, that is partly due to example set by my father. He punished stupidity decisively and without mercy (dramatic emphasis). Anyway, every time I see or hear something that challenges intelligence as we know it, I always say, “I’m surrounded by idiots.” Certain things at work make me blink once, twice, and my one eye usually twitches sporadically. Example being over Easter weekend, I had a family of four walk in and I didn’t have a table for them and I told them they would have to wait a bit. Instead, like every other ‘smart’ person out there, they asked to sit four people at a table that could seat twelve. I told them no, “It’s meant for larger parties.”

“Can’t you pull that other table away so we can sit there?” Said ‘other’ table, could seat four people, but there was no space to put it in to, or extra chairs to put around it to seat four. Needless to say, I did my two blinks and eye twitch. I couldn’t (and I never will) understand why people don’t seem to get that I am a hostess, not a magician.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re looking at the picture and the title and wondering, “What could this be about?” Well, I can tell you it’s about funny little observations I’ve made while being a hostess, and most people do it.

Now, everyone hates to hear that there is a wait of any kind for a table. They want to sit down right then and there and order their food and drink and eat immediately. Nice, right? Well, on Fridays and Saturdays at most establishments, you have to wait a few minutes. Sometimes longer. Don’t get all pissy about it. Accept it as a fact of reality and life and you’ll find inner peace. I’m kidding… but, seriously, shut up instead of winging about waiting.

Anyway, at my restaurant when I tell people to wait, I always scope the joint and see them looking around, as if them staring at desirable tables will somehow make them get up faster. Hate to break it to you, but that isn’t going to happen. We have a couch before our fireplace, and frequently I tell people to sit there while they wait to get them out of my hair. A few minutes later, as I glance around, I’ll see somebody stand up and look around and maybe even point to a table. You do realize that people can see you, right? You’re not suddenly gifted with invisibility. Reminds of the Cone of Silence from Get Smart. We all know how that turned out. They look silly and tables that are already seated and eating or talking, give them looks. They pop up like prairie dogs and I have to chuckle. I gave you a wait that was ex amount of time long. And you’re already impatient five minutes in? Gah! The prairie dogs are on the loose!

In other words, when a hostess gives you a wait time and you sit down, don’t pop back up again to check on a table. People will be judging you.

If you’ve read my title and aren’t offended, congratulations! If you read it and are, get over it. I’m a woman and I’m giving an honest opinion of what I’ve seen of female villains in movies and shows and how they are portrayed. And I’ve discovered that the best female villains were written and scripted by men. Here’s why.

A woman is going to write a female villain in terms of ‘how would I act if I was evil’. All well and good, but she’s also not likely to be honest about it because she doesn’t want people to not be able to relate to her female villain. In her attempt to make them relatable, she makes them too weak or nice in a way. Not good! When you make a female a villain, make them a conniving b*tch because that’s what a woman is when she’s angry, or has plans for world domination. Now, not to say all men have female villains down pat. They make mistakes too… why? Because they’re human like us and nobody is infallible.

An example of a bad female ‘villain’ is Maleficent, as portrayed by Angelina Jolie in the 2014 movie of the same name. It was written by a woman about one of Disney’s most iconic villains, and she made her good. The mind positively boggles. The movie had a low reception from moviegoers, with a score of 51% on Rotten Tomatoes. Their critique was Jolie’s performance was good, but the script and the idea that Maleficent was the ‘heroine’ just didn’t fit. And most loyal Disney fans would have preferred the traditional Sleeping Beauty story with Jolie playing the green-skinned villainess as she was supposed to be. We all know that even though the movie was named Sleeping Beauty, Prince Philip, and Flora, Fauna, and Merriweather were the real heroes.

Now the example of a good female villain would be Hela, portrayed by Cate Blanchett in Thor: Ragnarok. She was powerful, terrifying, eerily attractive, and above all: a cold-hearted b*tch. Thank you, male writers! I have tears in my eyes! Hela was the perfect villain and Cate Blanchett did an excellent job with bringing her to life. She was devious, vengeful, spiteful, and strong. You hated her, but at the same time, you admired her. She knew what she wanted from life, or, death as it were; and she knew how she was going to get it. Things just conspired to get in her way, but she certainly wasn’t a villain who was a pushover.

Now, that’s not to say that women can’t do female villains, it’s just rare for them to be honest enough with their character to create a foe worthy of their protagonist. When I created my main villain of my trilogy, I just stopped analyzing and let the character speak to me. Princess Rae dan Kae of Capricorn, killed her mother when she was born because of the curse of a pair of horns that protrude from her temples cutting her open. Her father blamed her for his wife’s demise, but never said anything directly to her. Rae dan Kae is the unspoken heir to the throne, and is too terrifying for any man to approach to ask for her hand in marriage. She is conniving and plans to subjugate the other nations to her whim and will. Her father thinks he makes the plans, but she is really the influence over him and many others in her kingdom. She kills because she can, and her moods are unpredictable. Rae is incapable of love and the only true emotion she is possession of is contempt. Everyone else and all other nations are beneath her and her idea of Capricorn. She was the perfect opposition for Zodia in every way, and when I wrote their clashes, I really enjoyed myself.

Well, there you have it for that problem: the dilemma of worthy female villains. Careful with humanizing them because you could possibly take away those traits that will make them truly despicable.

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