Weekly Recap: The Dork Tower

Hollywood spent over a decade trying to figure out how to adapt Stephen King’s fantasy novel series for the big screen. The end result was a movie that was panned by critics. Despite a first place opening at the box office, The Dark Tower will likely end up losing money. Idris Elba is expected to reprise his role in a follow-up TV series and any potential sequels. But based on the movie’s lackluster performance, those plans have to be called into question.

Yep, the summer movie season is limping to the finish line. But there’s still a lot of activity here at Le Blog. Let’s recap the week and see if you missed anything.

We have been building towards an important milestone here at the site. Last summer, Jestak officially took over the birthday articles on August 9. Since then, he has posted an update daily. Next week, he will post his 365th consecutive article here at Le Blog – something no one else has even come close to doing. This week marked a related anniversary. A year ago, Jestak began supplementing my updates with additional content. So he’s officially been contributing for a year.

This week’s birthdays included the creator of the Boy Who Lived, a Bond villain best known for hawking lemon-lime soda, the director of the last two Bond movies, and a butt-kicking Bond girl, Aquaman and Sinestro, Burt Reynolds’ best buddy, a legendary Hollywood producer and one of the most respected directors in film, the Thin Man’s wife, that guy from Avatar, a former president and a fictional commander in chief, Dr. Cox, a former Lost castaway and future superhero, a superbowl-winning quarterback, a successful director and his son, a very bad Santa, the Guardians of the Galaxy helmer,

Can’t wait to see who shows up in next week’s big anniversary recap.

Daffy Stardust has continued assembling his movie poster puzzle. This week the spotlight was on George Lucas’ second-best movie as a director. American Graffiti is a big old hunk of nostalgia which Daffy argues was actually surprisingly revolutionary for the time.

Kevthewriter looked back at Tim Burton’s take on Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and asked, hey, why did so many people shell out money to see that? My short answer us is that at the time, Depp-fatigue had not yet set in. But it was about to.

This week on Twin Peaks, Audrey Horne finally returned. But I don’t think too many of her vocal fans were in a celebratory mood as her return was featured in one of the weaker episodes of the season. In fact, if you told me that David Lynch set out to frustrate viewers during the twelfth hour of the revival, I wouldn’t be surprised at all. I suspect that future episodes will reveal information that will make this installment more interesting, but since Lynch withheld essential details from the audience, there were lengthy scenes that were hard to care about.

The Movieline archives kicked off with a cover story about Meryl Streep from the Aug 1992 issue. At the time, Streep was going through her transition from acclaimed movies seen by small audiences to more mainstream fare like the effects-heavy comedy, Death Becomes Her. The same issue included Joe Queenan’s take on the filmography of Oliver Stone up through JFK and a look back at the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer when no one knew who Joss Whedon was and Luke Perry looked like he might be a movie star.

Last and almost certainly least, I shared one of the time-killing apps on my phone, Disney Emoji Blitz. If you’re looking for a casual puzzle game or a few Disney-themed emojis to text to your friends, check it out.

Next Week: Jestak’s 365th birthday article plus probably a few more after that, Kevthewriter looks at a couple of comedies aimed at the ladies and asks why one was successful while the other was not, the lucky 13th episode of Twin Peaks: The Return, and a Movieline cover story featuring a French actress who was popular in the late ’90s,

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