The opening scene of “The Big Bang Theory,” an otherwise promising CBS comedy series about two socially inept geniuses, takes place in a sperm bank, where these two geeks are contemplating the donation of their, um, seed for posterity.

They soon decide to abort their emissions, however, which raises the question of why they were there in the first place.

The answer probably has something to do with deep-seated anxieties and insecurities embedded in the brains of the show’s emotionally arrested writing staff, but that’s just a guess since I’m not a therapist.

All I know is: I wish the writers of “The Big Bang Theory” (and those who wrote last week’s similarly obsessed premiere episode of “Back to You” on Fox) would work out their issues in private with trained professionals, rather than expose them to the rest of us on TV.

The running commentary on bodily functions in “Big Bang” – including an ill-considered emphasis on bowel movements – stands in sharp contrast to the rest of the show, which aspires successfully to be as smart as its two gifted protagonists.

Their names are Sheldon (Jim Parsons) and Leonard (Johnny Galecki) – an unfathomable homage to the late Sheldon Leonard, producer of “Make Room for Daddy,” “I Spy” and other shows – and they live together in an L.A. apartment.

In the premiere episode, they discover that a pretty young blonde named Penny (Kaley Cuoco) has moved in across the hall.