Friday, August 10, 2012

While I'm off enjoying New Baby the fabulous Maria Grazia Swan is filling in for me with guest posts. Enjoy!

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I remember the first time I set foot in an American Catholic
Church. I was fresh off the plane and totally clueless.

You see, back home, in order to go to mass and not get
publicly humiliated and asked to leave, you had to follow a strict dress
code.I’m talking about the female part
of the population—seems like males could do no wrong.

Pants were not allowed, no excuses. Head covered. Sleeves
had to be long enough to hide the elbow, skirt to cover the knees, and you HAD
to wear stockings or knee high socks.

Most Italian churches are big, I mean, really big, maybe because
in general there is only one church per community. So you might ask how would
the priest know if you were dressed appropriately? They actually checked us
out. An old priest would walk down the aisle and look us over. If something
appeared out of place they would motion for you to get up and walk to the end
of the row. By then everyone would be staring at you.

The head scarf was an easy fix, even a clean handkerchief
(yes, we used real handkerchiefs to blow our noses) would do. Sleeve length was
negotiable. It got sticky when the priest questioned if you were indeed wearing
nylons or not, he would feel your legs to make sure. Not making this up! If you
had pants, you were gone, no questions, just the hand pointing to the massive
double doors at the back of the church.

The walk of shame.

So I was stunned when I went to my first mass in the
Cathedral of the Phoenix diocese. I saw women walking up to take communion
without covering their heads and wearing sleeveless sun dresses. OMG!!!!

My kind of church!!! I became so comfortable with the new
experience, at some point I forgot about my Italian up-bringing.

But it all came back to me two years ago in Rome. I went to
visit Saint Peter Cathedral and got kicked out because my sleeves weren’t long
enough. No, I wasn’t wearing a sun dress, but a knit top with cap sleeves. How
about that?

I don’t go to church much these days, but when I do, the
ease of the American Catholics always puts a smile in my heart.

6 comments:

When I was little they were still making us look nice, but no one ever checked us out or kicked us out. Though my grandmother lamented the changes. She had the doily on her head and the white gloves and the whole shebang. When my mother was young the mass was still in Latin.

I'm thankful it loosened up for my lifetime, but we still respected the place and experience. I haven't been in a long time now but seems to me the last few churches I attended they might as well have been sitting down for a party. No silence before. No quiet reflection. More mingling like some giant picnic in pews.

I'm all for loose, but there's such a thing as too loose. Or I'm just old. :)

Terri, I agree with you, I think the American Catholic Church had to adapt in order to keep people coming, it's different in Italy, old alliances and family traditions still fill the churches and their coffers.Thanks Valerie, it's fun now, not so much back then.

I had no idea!!! I know when I was young the head covering was still necessary and shorts were out or jeans but I never heard of the rest of the rules you mentioned. Personally, I can understand being respectful but I think that is a bit much and more likely to deter people from going. I have a problem with those who demand total control for what I feel is an unjustified reason. And to embarrass everyone too!!I'm afraid organized religion is no longer for me. Too many manmade rules and intolerence in many cases.

I prefer Saturday Mass. I can get away with capris and a button down shirt. I have to say, some are too relaxed. We saw a few young ladies wearing barely there, threadbare jean skirts a while back with tank tops. Um, no. As for the dress code for overseas Mass, useful information to file away! Thanks! *g*

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