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Saturday, January 9, 2016

Lonely in a house full of people

I'm not alone in a room. Ever. I don't even pee alone. My girls follow me as I change my clothes and make my bed.
Yet I still feel alone. Empty.
The only thing that even seems to help is prayer. I know it will be ok.
This is simply the result of having no car, of being stuck at home every day. all day.I haven't left the house in a week. Even then it was only to go grocery shopping.I don't really want to leave the house, to be perfectly honest. It's cold outside. I don't like being cold.
We have gone down to one car. It's hard but it saves a ton of m
oney. Right now that is important.
Even in a house where I can cuddle with children at night. Where I teach lessons all day and nurse a baby all night. I still feel lonely.

It feels selfish to feel this way. I am so very blessed and I know this.