Drabble Short Story Contest - #260: SPACE SHANTIES

Well done to last week's winner. TheOriginalB picked the topic "SPACE SHANTIES"

01 - TheOriginalB - A Drunken Pilot (aka It Was This Or Spanish Ladies and I'm Not Re-using Content)

*ahem*

What do you do with a drunken pilot? (x3)
Early in the morning.

Launch his escape pod toward the Thargoids (x3)
Early in the morning.

Hey! Ho! Up she rises. (x3)
Early in the morning.

What do you do with a surface Scarab? (x3)
Early in the morning.

Hit it with rocks until it blows up (x3)
Early in the morning.

Hey! Ho! Up she rises. (x3)
Early in the morning.

What do you with a fully laden Type-9? (x3)
Early in the morning.

Ram it in the mail slot and draw station fire (x3)
Early in the morning.

02 - phong - Must..learn..reading ..skillz.

Being a rear-admiral in the imperial space navy certainly entitled one to certain perks and priveleges not available to lesser ranks,but the demands of duty required unremitting vigilance and the higher up the chain of command the heavier the burden.So a chance of home leave,however brief,was highly prized.The somewhat shy four-year old nephew she remembered had blossomed into a confident, intelligent ten-year old,defiant of jaw and firmly resolved to follow in the footsteps of his celebrated relative.She offered him the data cube,a record of her journey during the intervening years."Sheesh,auntie..."

03 - Frank - The Plight of the Molly Rose

The wind it did blow boys
from out of the sun

A coronal ejection
Let's spool up and run

The lady we left boys
a sight to behold

We'd crippled her drives
and then poked her with holes

we never looked back boys
to see what we'd done

We left her to die
when we'd all had our fun

Their comms were left open
The screams we did hear

To wash out our shame
we did all have a beer

Our black hearted captain
he laughed at their plight

But then we all knew
that his manners were shockingly bad

04 - Listeri69 - Kernal, kornal, cernal buggy colonel Blow me.....

Deep in the bowels of a small studio in new Glasgow two aspiring producers decide to write an inspiring space shanty

'Winnard is a massive kock , Hankey owns a crusty sock,
Midden, should remain hidden. and Skippy he looks like chuck rock'

'It's inspired me' moof nodded along

Kow said it's good but it's missing something how about

'Winnard is a massive c**t , his belly sticks out in front
his willy is rather chilly
for in his trousers you will have to hunt...

'I'm liking this more' Moof said

Not as good as our granny though 'Pigfart' is a classic

05 - phong - Mr.Hanky Sings Phong

'It was Friday night at the Fer de lance,and the peacocks were strutting their stuff;When into the bar strode a pilot from far,And he said that his name was Simuff.He hitched up a chair and sat down with a glare.Sven the bartender poured him a drink.....''Will you shut up with that daft song',said Kow."I'm trying to land.Where did you hear it,anyway?"'On tinternet.There's quite a bit about you,too.'"I've always fancied being part of popular culture.How does it go,then?" 'Stop',said Simoof,'we've reached 100 words.'

06 - RoyalHankey - Star Wars

All I want, all I want, all I want is a girl
Someone that cares enough about me
That she refuses to react
When I act like I don't care about her

Ice-packs for my shiners
Though you're on my nerves
Someone smart enough to click me back together
?? simple and suede and still evadable

Is that too much to ask?
Is that too much to ask?
Is that too much to ask?
Well, I don't know

Well, I don't know
Someone that loves me the way of
Star Wars, Wizards and Ninja Wars
Star Wars, Wizards and Ninja Wars