With Paris on our minds it's hard to write about anything else. How do we respond to terror and tragedy? When does defense become terror too? No one has the answers to this. We are in a whole new era. And it requires a mature, considered kind of response. Earlier I cited the movie, The Little Drummer Girl which came out in the 80s. It was about terror in the Middle East. Acts of terror were committed and the other side responded but this time with their own acts of terror. At first as the audience we are rooting for the good guys but as the film progresses its hard to tell if there are any good guys. The other side is now acting as horrifically as the terrorists. There is no longer any difference between them.

That we need to defend out countries is without question but how we do it must be well thought out. Knee jerk reactions will not solve the problem but will escalate it. We are in a whole new world which is going to require a whole new way of thinking. This is not a John Wayne movie for those of you who remember him. This time the hero is not going to ride in on his white horse.

I think each of us needs to decide how we will handle our life as a result of these events. Do we become suspicious, blaming everyone who is different. Do we scapegoat others not like us? We have to be very careful about what we choose.

Of course we need to express our horror but we cannot let it dictate our life. We need to live every precious moment of it. We need to value all life. We have to live from our hearts and make our life count. We have to hold dear all of our family and friends while still remaining open to the people we meet.

This feels like a test of something to me but I cannot say what exactly other than it is a test of how we will respond. And how we respond will say exactly who we are.

My best friend on the planet is in Greece with her husband during this. In order to get back to Rhode Island they have to take four planes. They are scared but they had the BIG conversation. They discussed if something did go on how they would respond. They both said that they would try to help even if it meant they would not survive. We all need to have that conversation with ourselves. We all need to find out who we really are.