When the narcissistic parent returns after giving you the silent treatment

A video about my own personal experience with my father trying to get back into my life after giving me the silent treatment. A little advice on how to keep going with ‘No contact’, which is where I am currently at in my own recovery.

10 thoughts on “When the narcissistic parent returns after giving you the silent treatment”

Eh, sucks to hear that your father is like that… someone who I considered to be my best friend, who I’ve known for over 20 years, turned out to be a narcissist/psychopath, so I know exactly where you’re coming from.

I don’t know if I’m also co-dependent or not, probably am. Anyways, I feel that once you acknowledge this truth about narcissistic behavior in people, it opens up like a pandora’s box, d’you know what I mean?

Just felt like writing all of this here, after watching your video. I’m a bit surprised actually because you seem to be so firm and stable, like you’ve got it all together, plus you’re married, so there are some questions pouncing in my mind (like “how are you doing this?” lol), but I’ll just conclude here and thanks for sharing. ❤

Thanks for taking the time to comment and share your experience. I am sorry your friend turned out be a narcissist.I hope you didnt get too hurt in the process of finding out (or before). I appreciate your kind words about how you see me. I am definetely at a much more stable and happier stage in my life, although the journey here was very tough and in order to heal you need to leave your comfort zone ALOT 😉. That is something that helped me immensely, along with the help of 3 different very good therapists over a period of 9 years. I met my husband at a time when I had completely given up looking and resigned to the idea of being a crazy cat lady 😜. We both come from a background where we didnt have a healthy family, so found that in each other. It is very healing to find someone that you can relate to in this way. I hope you are able to find love in unexpected places and hope in your heart. Working hard at recovering and being hopeful for the future can really make a difference. Hugs to you 🌼

Thank you for your post Athina. There was an incident in September that made me decide to go no contact with my father. However he contacts me at ‘appropriate’ times. Not because he’s genuinely interested in me, but because (I believe) he can say to people – I’ve done all the right things and see what she does, how ungrateful and selfish she is. He can play the victim. I take his calls but only answer his questions with elaborating. I don’t know how to change things. I’m scared of his reaction. I don’t want contact with him and he most likely doesn’t even know why.

Playing the victim is a HUGE thing for narcissists. That is their weapon at making others look bad..You are not ungrateful or selfish..(My dad has said these things to me too). I can understand that you are scared of his reaction..If you decide to go No contact again, let me know. I can help support you. xx

Thanks Athina, that really validating to hear. Sometimes I think I’m reading too much into things, but then my gut reaction says opposite. I will definitely ask for your help about no contact. Thank you ❤

Another very nice post. It’s a touch decision to go no contact but I agree sometimes that is what we have to do. I had to do that with my father and I didn’t speak to him for years before he passed away. I often wondered if I would have guilt over that but I am at peace with my choice.

My father is also a narcissist, and I went No contact just over 10 years ago. It’s the best thing I ever could have done. I’ve had to take help in dealing with this, and it’s been a bumpy road, but I have now healed from it all. I’m lucky enough to have a wonderful mother, great siblings, and a very loving partner instead.
The last time I saw him I told him everything that was on my mind and every way he had hurt me and my brother. Before that, I was like you, though, I never went against him, I was very compliant – until that moment, when it all basically exploded. He’s never tried to contact me personally, but there have been other people (eg. partners of his that I’ve never met) that have contacted me on Facebook, etc. But I’m staying strong. He has no part in my life any more, and he never will – simply because it’s not worth it. I am much better off without him.
This was a really great and interesting video. I hope it gives some clarity to other people going through similar things! Thank you for sharing 🙂