Sometimes I listen to my colleagues, or happen to hear parts of their conversation on the phone, sometimes the user on the other side of the line is so upset that it's hard not to hear him! (or her) b.ex. "My laptop does not work and you promised to call and now it's two hours and no one has called me back!" etc.

To remain calm in this situation and also manage the trick of calming down the other one is not easy, but it is possible. The most important thing is to listen and feel on which level you should put yourself on, which phrases are the right ones to use - both for him and for yourself! I'm not a very skilled liar and it feels like anyone can hear on my voice when I'm not honest. There's a lot of theater played at a servicedesk - some days it work perfect and not much theater needs to be played at all, other days I would rather draw a burqa over my whole body and hide. And still we are not working with a webcam! (If they ever would start with that, I would quit on the spot.)

At last, I always have my "secret weapon" to use, well, secret and secret ... The fact that when it really is needed I do my utmost to see to that the client really get supported as quickly as possible, even if it is not myself who deliver the solution. Through mail, phone, chat, searches on google and in manuals, I usually find more information, and then I call back and inform the customer. This is No. 2, even if you don't have the solution - inform the user. The worst thing they know is to not get any information or communication at all for several hours.

But I hate conflicts and I want to avoid to give bad news, which is not always possible. Sometimes (but not often) it happens that someone calls for a problem we can not resolve, either because we do not provide any support for this particular type of computer or that the problem isn't possible to solve. (A new laptop might have to be ordered.)

I have an ex- colleague who really knows how to effectively get a call in the direction you want to have it. Several members of her new team had to deal with a German lady who, contrary to what is normal, didn't calm down or start to listen after the usual methods. The next time she called they all asked my colleague if she could take the call. And indeed, "the lady" in question started directly in a highpitch angry voice to complain. After approx. 20 seconds my colleague interrupts her and says: "If you continue to speak to me in that tone, you can pack up your stuff and look for a job at Stasi in East Germany!"

Total silence.

It was as if she had a punctured balloon. The lady took a few breaths and started to behave like a real lady.