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Mothers balance work, faith, family

J.D. Gallop, Florida Today
12:01 a.m. EDT May 12, 2013

In spite of obstacles, these moms persevere.

Annetha Jones at her Port St. John, Fla. at home with her children Jada and Marcus on May 8, says that raising children, with all of the joy and pain involved, is worth it. "I wouldn't trade anything for being a mother," she said. Jones is married and an assistant principal at Jefferson Middle School in Merritt Island.(Photo: Craig Bailey, Florida Today)

MELBOURNE, Fla. -- She is worth far more than jewels, cites the Bible's Proverbs 31 — among many other praises — about wives, mothers and women who do it all.

The Old Testament scripture — sometimes sung or read to mothers during the Sabbath in traditional Jewish homes or quoted from the pulpit in churches — celebrates the ideal mother who provides, nurtures and oversees the affairs of her household.

Translations vary, but words used to describe women's character include virtuous, noble and valiant. Pastors, friends and relatives of some local women say the ancient text still rings true, even in the face of modern challenges: income inequality, redefined gender roles, raising children in a media-saturated world, a rise in single motherhood and the distractions of social media and mobile technology.

Despite the obstacles, Port St. John resident Annetha Jones says that raising children, with all of the joy and pain involved, is worth it. "I wouldn't trade anything for being a mother," said Jones, an assistant principal at a Merritt Island middle school.

Jones is married with a 16-year-old son and an 18-year-old daughter now attending Florida State. The professional educator's world is a whirlwind of meetings, late-night work sessions, crunched with church gatherings and nightly family prayers.

She is among thewomen who make up about 46 percent of the labor force, either providing primary or supplemental income for their families, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Jones, who was raised by a single mother, said work does not mean the negation of family time.

"We try to have family dinners almost every night ... I cook but my husband and I both try to share in that," she said.

Despite all she has going on, Karen Davis says she is far from feeling overwhelmed.

Davis recently stood near the concession stand at Knecht Park in Palm Bay, working the booth and cheering on her son's youth baseball team even as the 10-year-old sat sidelined by a foot injury.

Annetha Jones reads her Bible at her Port St. John, Fla., home on May 8. She says that raising children, with all of the joy and pain involved, is worth it. "I wouldn't trade anything for being a mother," she said.(Photo: Craig Bailey/Florida Today)

Her brown hair — salted with a touch of gray — is close to her scalp, the result of sitting under shears earlier this year as she, her 12-year-old daughter and 81-year-old mother donated their hair to help raise funds for children suffering with cancer.

And the mother of three is preparing to adopt two young orphans from Ethiopia.

"There's definitely prayer involved, I try my best to be focused and keep my priorities in order," Davis, a full-time pharmacist, said about finding balance between her family, faith, community work and career.

Scriptures

The valiant or noble woman as described in scriptures carries a passion for directing her household. In that light, Pastor Jarvis Wash of R.E.A.L. Church in Rockledge points to Ilene Herr. She moved to Melbourne Beach in 1990 from New York with her two young sons, Joshua and Jason, fresh from a divorce.

"The most important thing for anyone going through that is to have a support system. I always tell people that if the mother is OK, then the kids will be OK," said Herr, now 61 and an assistant principal at Satellite Beach High School.

She also is the principal of the religious school at Temple Beth Sholom, a Conservative Jewish congregation in Melbourne where she took her sons for Sabbath services.

Herr says her focus is always on her students, sometimes sharing advice or even bringing in a hot tray full of hot dogs-in-a-blanket while also overseeing the medical needs of her ailing mother.

"I don't sleep a lot. What I've found is that you do in your life what's most important. I take care of my family and my mother. Maybe the ironing doesn't get done quite right or you don't get a chance to pick the weeds, but you do what you have to do. It's a passion."

Chaotic

Yolanda Artis, 33, of Rockledge said having her grandparents as a support system, along with her faith, helped lift her from alife that started with a chaoticchildhood into the order of a life as a working mother.

Artis, who said she survived sexual, emotional and physical abuse while growing up in Brooklyn, N.Y., also was abandoned by her mother. Artis never married but remains determined to see her three children seek their education and contribute to the world.

"I let them know they're loved, regardless of our situation and I don't regret having them. I tell young people today to never let your life situation make you feel like you don't have any opportunities," said Artis, a professional health care worker.

"You have to create your opportunities. Every Sunday we do family dinners, no matter what. We play cards, hang out at the house," she said.

Artis, pursuing a nursing license at Brevard Community College, says she manages her time to take care of her family and work.

"My cellphone is my life. I can also work at home to get things done and I'm one the phone with the school," she said.

Her dream; is to one day open her own hospice center.

"People choose their destination. You have to think bigger than yourself," Artis said. "You can do better."