One of these days I will get it together, I tell myself over and over.

And then the next day I say it again. And then the next and the next.

One of these days.

Being a parent is overwhelming. It’s exhilarating and exciting and exhausting and hmmm…let me think of more words that begin with “e” and I’ll get back to you.

One of these days.

The thing is, I don’t want to be perfect. I know I am no where near it and I am also acutely aware that no other mother is perfect either. In fact, perfection is so far out of my sights that I am not quite sure where all these uneasy feelings come from. Yet here they are.

I just want to hide.

I want people to stop asking me questions. I want to stop anticipating needs. I want someone else to know that we have enough milk left to make it through breakfast as long as one of us opts for an egg on toast instead of cereal. I want to remove my brain, hand it to the nearest responsible (enough) adult and go hide. In my hiding place.

Is that wrong?

Does that make me an unfit mother/wife/friend/blogger/daughter/sister/person?

I don’t THINK so.

Right?

And so I think that I can fix it. I think that one of these days I won’t take on too much and get run down. I think that I will magically make a sustainable system of household efficiency where all I have to do is show up and enjoy my beautiful life. I think that if I could just hide for a few moments I could figure it out.

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“I want people to stop asking me questions. I want to stop anticipating needs. I want someone else to know that we have enough milk left to make it through breakfast as long as one of us opts for an egg on toast instead of cereal. I want to remove my brain, hand it to the nearest responsible (enough) adult and go hide. In my hiding place.”

Hahaha, I could not have said it better! No, you are not unfit and you are most certainly not alone in feeling this way!!

marrisa

Exactly how I feel. I love my family, but God I just want to drop out of my life from time to time.

Mama G

I feel the same at times but it is only transitory.
If these feelings persist go see your GP because you might be depressed.
Ps you are doing a great job anyway

Tracey

Reading this I felt a little like you read my diary! You are certainly not alone in feeling like this! One of these days we might just get it together 😉

Momma

Oh my goodness, I know just how you feel. Yesterday when I got off work I walked into the livingroom and thought to myself, “Am I really the only who sees what a disaster area this is??”

I’m also tired of being the keeper of daily-life knowledge, such as if there’s enough milk left for one more meal, or how many days I can get through before I need to buy cat food. I’d like someone else to pick what we have for dinner. They don’t even have to cook it! Just tell me what exactly it is that is wanted for dinner, so that I can cook it and serve it without hearing “This AGAIN?” or “But I don’t like _____!” I want people to put their own crap away so they don’t get mad at me when I can’t remember where I put it because I’ve put so many flipping things away today. Again.

I’d love to just book a hotel room and order room service and soak in a large tub and have control of the TV clicker for just one day, and NOT worry about whether or not my son ate breakfast/lunch/dinner (or WHAT he ate), or how many dishes will be left in the sink when I get back home, or if the cats were fed.

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