Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Hiding

Am I hiding by acting like the girl my father/mother has always expected me to be?

Am I hiding by trying to be the kind of woman my husband wants me to be?

Am I hiding by trying to stay in line with the kind of woman I think my kids will want to remember me as? I don't want my kids to grow up wishing for another kind of mom.

Am I hiding by constantly trying to be a composite of many women I see around me-usually women who have skills I lack or personalities different from mine.

Am I hiding by agreeing to fit nicely into the roles I feel are acceptable in my church and social community?

Am I hiding behind what I feel are cultural norms ascribed to women and mothers? Do I have the courage to buck the tide?

Am I hiding behind my own fears? Am I afraid of failing or looking stupid, or being rejected if I raech for my dreams and let my latent true self emerge?

"to live as an authentic, ransomed, and redeemed woman means to be real and present in this moment. If we continue to hide, much will be lost. We cannot have intimacy with God or anyone else if we stay hidden and offer only who we think we ought to be or what we believe is wanted....You have only one life to live. It would be best to live your own."John and Stasi Eldrige in Captivating

6 comments:

That is the best book ever. It truly touched my heart and soul in ways I didn't anticipate. Are you doing the workbook too? I so recommend it if you are not. It allows you to be honest with yourself. Keep me posted as you go.