Posts Tagged ‘Jonas Brothers

Marcus McNeill is a giant of a man. He’s 6’7 and weighs 336 lbs and has been to the Pro Bowl his first two years in the NFL, so I’m not one to intentionally provoke him too much, but the fact that he is a giant Jonas Brothers fan is disturbing to me to no end. McNeill is one year younger than me, so it’s not like this is some generational thing that I can’t understand. Also, I can’t imagine he’s just making it up, because really, it’s not like saying you like the Jonas Brothers is going to get you laid. Unless you’re really into underage girls…Um, Marcus let’s not go down that road eh…?

After months of bilateral negotiations, Bulgarian human superweapon Krasimir Gaydarski has been deployed to Beijing for the Olympics at the host country’s request in order to help prevent any potentially fabulous protests while the games are underway. To maintain cover, he has been assigned a role as a mid-blocker on the men’s volleyball team. Thanks to months of undercover research, we here at The Slanch Report were able to bring you this story, at much personal peril.

No word on how this might affect the international Jonas Brothers futures market.

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