General Question

How do you cope with failure?

17 Answers

In the case of the failure of my first marriage, it varied day to day, over about a 2 year period. It was a mutual decision, made by two people who still loved each other but could not get along day in and day out. Though we both knew it was for the best, it was still devastating. I cried and grieved, screamed and shouted, reflected and grew calm, and eventually accepted it and found peace.

When you are in the moment of failure, it can be hard. If possible, try to put it in perspective. Everyone fails. All the great business leaders, world leaders, athletes, superstars, every single manjack one of them failed. Not once, but many times.

The difference between someone who becomes a big success and everyone else is not that others failed, but that the big success picked him or herself up and kept going!!!!!

Recognize it sucks. Rage about having life handing you an AFOG. Then pick yourself up and begin charting your next course.

You did not give any details. Is failure the issue here? We are not talking failed relationship are we, which is a slightly different thing?

Great answer marina. The failure I’m talking about is regarding school. There are just so many things going on right now. I just needed an outsider to tell me to look at the big picture. It’s hard to get out of tunnel vision when then only thing you see are the problems around and ahead of you.

I try to think things out and see what went wrong. Then after I’ve drowned my sorrows with comfort food, I plunge ahead and get over it. Sometimes it’s easy, other times it’s not…
Best thing is to let it go and learn from it…but that’s also the hardest thing.

@jcs007 School can be overwhelming. It is very hard if you have a lot of things going on. I assure you that it is not the end of your life. There is lots of great life after school (most people peak well after).

That said, it is still hard getting through the day-to-day when faced with a setback. Be proud that you were able to reach out for support. Know that you have it here. Take care of yourself.

@Seesul: actually, it’s my 5th semester. things have been gradually going downhill. And right now, I don’t know how things could get worse. (Or I at least don’t want to know how things could get worse).

I remind myself that Edison went through something like 1800 different materials for filament for the light bulb before succeeding, and he never got discouraged. He said something like “now I know 1799 things that WON’T work!”

If you learn from the experience it is not really a failure. Like stratman37 said above, the multiple attempts at finding a suitable filament material were not individual failures, rather they are just part of the process of elimination… ie. ruling out the materials that don’t work. As long as you don’t quit, you haven’t failed yet.