Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Some of biggest actors, directors, screenwriters, and others were born 100 years ago. They range from the first Blake Carrington, “The Love Goddess,” Ed Norton, a member of the Rat Pack, a pioneering film director, one of Disney’s first stars, and the last surviving star of the silent era.

JOHN FORSYTHE (JANUARY 29)

A stage, film, and television actor whose career spanned six decades and is best known as Blake Carrington and the voice of “Charlie.”

Leading lady of five films starring cowboy-singer Gene Autry. Will celebrate centennial on February 19.

Birth Name: Eunice Fay McKenzie

JAMES EDWARDS (MARCH 6)

African-American actor who played a variety of soldiers.

Died: January 4, 1970 (age 51)

Notable Works:The Set-Up (1949); Home of the Brave (1949); Bright Victory (1951); The Member of the Wedding (1952); The Joe Louis Story (1953); The Phenix City Story (1955); The Manchurian Candidate (1962); Patton (1970)

Former child actress who graduated to adult roles and retired from films at age 26.

Birth Name: Dawn Paris

Died: July 4, 1993 (age 75)

Notable Works:Anne of Green Gables (1934-under name of Dawn O’Day; took name of character after this); Stella Dallas (1937-nominated for Best Supporting Actress); Vigil in the Night (1940); The Devil and Daniel Webster (1941); Murder, My Sweet (1944)

JUNE DUPREZ (MAY 14)

English film actress who had a brief career in Hollywood.

Died: October 30, 1984 (age 66)

Notable Works:The Four Feathers (1939); The Thief of Baghdad (1940); None but the Lonely Heart (1944); And Then There Were None (1945)

JOSEPH WISEMAN (MAY 15)

Canadian film actor who is best known for playing the first Bond villian.

Actor who worked with Bette Davis and Alfred Hitchcock, and starred in iconic film noir.

Birth Name: John Dall Thompson

Died: January 15, 1971 (age 50 or 52-may have been born in 1920)

Notable Works:The Corn is Green (1945-Oscar-nominated for Best Supporting Actor); Rope (1948); Another Part in the Forest (1948); Gun Crazy (1950); Spartacus (1960)

ROBERT PRESTON (JUNE 8)

Actor who originated the role of Harold Hill in The Music Man.

Birth Name: Robert Preston Meservey

Died: March 21, 1987 (age 68)

Notable Works: Union Pacific (1939); Beau Geste (1939); This Gun for Hire (1942); Wake Island (1942); The Music Man (1962); How the West was Won (1963); Victor/Victoria (1982-Oscar nominated for Best Supporting Actor)

American conductor, pianist, and composer whose was among the first US composers to receive worldwide acclaim.

Birth Name: Louis Bernstein

Died: October 14, 1990 (age 72)

Notable Works:On the Waterfront (1954); West Side Story (1961)

RICHARD GREENE (AUGUST 25)

English actor who had a brief Hollywood career and is best remembered for playing Robin Hood during the 1950s.

Died: June 1, 1985

Notable Works: Four Men and a Prayer (1938); The Little Princess (1939); Stanley and Livingstone (1939); Forever Amber (1947); The Adventures of Robin Hood (1955-59)

ALAN JAY LERNER (AUGUST 31)

Oscar and Tony-winning lyricist who won three awards for each.

Died: June 14, 1986

Notable Works:An American in Paris (1951-Oscar winner for Best Original Screenplay); Royal Wedding (1951); Gigi (1958-Oscar winner for Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Original Song); My Fair Lady (1964)

DICK HAYMES (SEPTEMBER 13)

Argentine-born singer who enjoyed a brief Hollywood career.

Died: March 28, 1980 (age 61)

Notable Works:State Fair (1945); One Touch of Venus (1948)

RAND BROOKS (SEPTEMBER 21)

Actor best known as Scarlett O’Hara’s first husband in “Gone with the Wind.”

Died: September 1, 2003 (age 84)

Notable Works: Gone with the Wind (1939)

ARNOLD STANG (SEPTEMBER 28)

Comic and voice actor who was the voice of “Top Cat” and the “Honey Nut Cheerios Bee.”

Actress who is the only person who was Oscar nominated for her first three films.

Birth Name: Muriel Teresa Wright

Died: March 6, 2005 (age 86)

Notable Works:The Little Foxes (1941-Oscar nominated for Best Supporting Actress); The Pride of the Yankees (1942-Oscar nominated for Best Actress); Mrs. Miniver (1942-Oscar winner for Best Supporting Actress); Shadow of a Doubt (1943); The Best Years of Our Lives (1946); The Men (1950)

DIANA SERRA CARY AKA “BABY PEGGY” (OCTOBER 29)

Child actress who is the last living star of the silent era.

Birth Name: Peggy-Jean Montgomery

Notable Works:The Darling of New York (1923); Captain January (1924)

ART CARNEY (NOVEMBER 4)

Actor best known for playing “Ed Norton” on the sitcom “The Honeymooners.”

Segments

Best Segment: NONE OF THEM.

Quotes: Forget it. WORST. TREEHOUSE OF HORROR. EVER!

Treehouse of Horror XXIII

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Homer:We have stairs?!

Lisa: (scared after one of the ghost attacks) Why is this happening to us?Marge: (nervous) I don’t know! I don’t know! I’m sure I don’t know!Homer: Oh sweetie, sometimes mysterious invisible being from hell waits for a family to go to sleep and kills them. Now go to bed.Lisa:But…Homer: E-eh! School night!

Pope Homer:Crush them! In the name of the Jebus!

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XXIV

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Abe:You should not be here while their mother’s away!Homer:And you should be dead, you’re so wrinkled and gray!Abe:I’ll give you the business, you yellow sea cow! This go-getting oldster will… Where am I now?

Ralph:That was gonna be my show-and-tell!

Moe:Hey, torso!Barney:Huh?Moe:What’s with the cookies? Even the human snail would’ve been done by now.Comic Book Guy:I am so sick and tired of people assuming that the human snail is, in some way, slow. Good day!

Moe:Excuse me, ma’am, but, uh, I ain’t never seen a normal stand up for us.Marge: (sighs) I, too, am a freak. One eye is blue, and the other a pale brown.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XXV

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Demon School Girl:Red dress. How original.Lisa:Making fun of someone’s clothes. How original.Demon School Girl:Wow. You wanna walk with us? (snow starts falling in the middle of the hallway)Lisa: It’s true. It would be a cold day in hell when I was popular.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XXVI

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Moe: [raises his fist in anger] Ha! I still refuse to admit the old man was right! [the monster’s fire breath incinerates him to a skeleton] Legitimate difference of opinion. [one more fire breath reduces him to ashes]

Kang:Just ’cause it looks like Season 4 doesn’t MAKE it Season 4!

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XXVII

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

(Sideshow Bob gets out from behind a tree)The Simpsons:Aah!! Sideshow Bob!
(Kang or Kodos gets out from behind a tree)The Simpsons:Aah!! one of you, guys!
(The ghost of Frank Grimes emerges from the ground)Marge, Bart and Lisa:Frank Grimes?Homer:Who?Frank Grimes:I’m the guy who hated you. Hated you! Died from my hatred of you!!Homer: (giggles) Good old Grimey.

Frank Grimes:Will nobody stop these people? (clips from all previous episodes appear and a counter goes from 1 to 600). Wow. In Hell they make you watch them all in a row!

Seymour Skinner:Welcome, children! The Games will begin in ten seconds! Do not step off your pedestals before…Ralph:Before what? (explosion) Wee!!

Ralph:I’m a god in this reality!

Lisa: (crying at Janey’s funeral) Why? Why did my best friend have to die!? (sobs) I mean, it’s a great college essay, but it’s not worth it.

Rev. Lovejoy:We now bury Sherri and Terri, survived by their brothers, Jerry and Larry, and their father and mother, Barry and Mary. And now some light remarks by comedian Drew Carey.

Chief Wiggum:Lisa Simpson, you are the prime suspect in the murders of two normals and a twin set!

Lisa:Come on, we got to save Mom!!Bart:Come on, imagine a motorcycle to get us out of here!!Lisa:My imagination isn’t that powerful.Bart:You imagined a girl that’s killing everyone in town!Lisa:Good point.

Lenny:So, how did things go in Prague?Carl:Oh, quite well. I “canceled” a few Czechs.

Ned:Homer! Fall backward! (Homer walks backwards and dies outside the button)Ned: Phew!
(Homer turns on to his back and dies)Ned:Phew!
(Homer’s tongue comes out and hits the button)Ned:Oh, you stupid son of a…… (town explodes)

Otto: (throw by Homer) Opium Rules!

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XVI

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Announcer:It’s the sixth game in the world series, and the current highlights is a cloud shaped like a giraffe that floated by during the rain delay. Oh, would you look at that? The batter just called timeout again! Now let’s look in the stands with the player’s wives. Oh, what do you know! They’re talking on cell phones. No doubt complaining about the good life.Kang:This is the most boring game in all the universe!Kodos:And with all the steroids they take the players look like freaks!Both:Freaks! Freaks! [A small miniature version of Kodos’ head appears on Kodos’ neck]Mini Kodos:Freaks! Freaks! Freaks! [Kodos bites it off and eats it]

Treehouse of Horror XIX

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Nelson: (to the Grand Pumpkin, holding a yellow pumpkin) Touch me and I’ll cut your friend.The Grand Pumpkin:What do I care? That’s a yellow pumpkin.Nelson:You’re a racist!The Grand Pumpkin:All pumpkins are racist. The difference is that I admit it. (starts eating Nelson)Nelson:I’d rather die than hate!

Grand Pumpkin: Pumpkin segregation forever!

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XX

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon:As a vegetarian, I did not eat any tainted burgers. And as a convenience store owner, I’m armed to the teeth.

Marge:Homie, where have you been?
(Homer speaks muncher-like)Lisa:Dad, are you becoming a muncher?Muncher Homer:I think the better brains is, are you brains are brains, Blarrrgh!
(Bart points a shot gun at Homer)Bart:Where do you want it, the mouth or the eyes?Muncher Homer:Oooh! Mouth.Bart:Eyes it is!

Stranger:Safe Zone? You really think this is Safe Zone? *laughs* Well, yeah, you’re right. It’s right over there.Soldier:Welcome, son. To survive, all we must do is eat your flesh.Marge:Hold it right there, bub. What kind of civilized people eat the body and blood of their savior? (Rev. Lovejoy gets nervous)

Lisa:Time has passed. Children play in the streets. At night, there is music and laughter. And all we had to do was let Bart take a bath in our food.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XXI

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Professor Frink:Oh! I went too far! Spoiled the whole show for everybody. I don’t deserve to wield the remote.

Visual gags

Treehouse of Horror VIII

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Comic Book Guy:Oooh, I’ve wasted my life.

Lenny:C’mon we just want to eat your skin.

Homer:Marge, kids, you’re alive!Lisa:All the layers of lead paint in this house made it the perfect bomb shelter!

Ned:We can all work together to build a Utopian society, free of violence, hate, and prejudice!Marge:That sounds beautiful, Ned. And let me just say my family and I share your vision for a better- Now!
(Marge and the kids pull out shotguns and shoot the mutants, leaving them in a pile.)Marge: Friends with mutants, right!Homer:Now, that’s the Marge I married! So, who wants to steal some Ferraris?!Bart, Lisa, & Marge:Ooh me! I do! I do!

Lisa:He’s trying to kill me!

Homer:Nobody likes a tattletale, Lisa.

Bart:Well I’ll be a son of a witch!Witch Marge:That’s right, I’m a witch! And I’m the one who withered your livestock, soured your sheep’s milk, and your made your shirts itchy!Farmer Lenny: Hey! You destroyed my turnip crop!Witch Marge:No, that was gophers.Witchhunter Wiggum:That’s impossible. I thought we burned all of the gophers!Witch Marge:Not all of them!
(Turns Wiggum into a giant gopher)

Maude:Oh, Neddy. Look at them up there, plotting our doom. They could force us to commit wanton acts of carnality.Ned: (Under his breath) Yeah, that’ll be the day.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror IX

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Bart:You’ve got to fight the hair, dad.Homer:But I look so youthful and hunky.Snake: (possessing Homer) The kid’s gotta die.Homer:But I love my son.Snake:More than a lush head of hair?Homer:Don’t make me choose!

Homer: (after watching Bart and Lisa on TV) Oooh, how are Bart and Lisa gonna get out of this one?

Regis Philbin:My eyes, my beautiful eyes!

Marge:Homer, do something! The ceiling’s not a safe place for a young baby.

Homer:Eh, all right, I gotit. [gets a broom and tries to poke Maggie off the ceiling] Come on, get off the… [Maggie grabs the handle with her free tentacles and swings Homer back and forth across the room] Bad baby! Oh, she’s entering the terrible two’s, all right.

Homer: (to Dr. Hibbert) Is there anything you can prescribe, doctor?Dr. Hibbert:Fire! And lots of it!Marge:Hmm, that’s your cure for everything!

Maggie: Very well then. I’ll drive! [laughs menacingly as the episode ends] I need blood.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror X

Segments

Best Segment

Scared me as a kid.

Quotes

Marge:Homer, did you remember the fog lights?Homer (singing): Guess I forgot to put the fog lights in!

Homer:Okay, Marge, you hide in the abandoned amusement park. Lisa, the pet cemetery. Bart, spooky roller disco and I’ll go skinny dipping in that lake where the sexy teens were killed 100 years ago tonight.

Guard: (To Lisa) Welcome aboard. Now, before you enter, you’re going to make a very difficult choice. You’re only allowed to take one parent with yo-Lisa:Mom.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XI

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Homer: That horoscope was bologna. Nothing happened except the pick-ax in my head, the rattlesnake bite, and the testicle thing.

Bart: (after a rat bites him) Oh, I just got over the plague.

Marge:Husband, without your weekly penitence, how shall we feed our children?Homer:Don’t worry. No child will ever starve in my home.
[Later, Homer throws Bart and Lisa into the deep dark woods]Homer:So long, kids! Enjoy your new home. Say hi to your other brother and sister.Bart:Other brother and sister?
[Bart and Lisa see skeletons that resemble them and scream together]Lisa:Face it, they’re not great parents.

Mayor Quimby: We’re all frightened and horny, but we can’t let some killer dolphins keep us from living and scoring.

Homer: Hey, you got to hand it to those dolphins. They just wanted it more.Lisa:I kind of wish I hadn’t freed their leader and, you know, doomed mankind.Marge:Oh, honey I wouldn’t say same doomed. It’s going to be an adjustment, no question.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XII

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Neighborhood Lady:Cholera! I got cholera!

Marge:The best thing about a Gypsy wedding is I’m not the hairiest woman here.Homer:Yep. Everything worked out for the best.Marge:What?! Bart is dead!Homer:Well, me saying I’m sorry won’t bring him back.Marge:The Gypsy said it would.Homer: [stubbornly] She’s not the boss of me.

Marge:Pierce, that was delicious! Can we help you with the dishes?Ultrahouse:Marge, what kind of cybertronic ultrabot would I be if I let those beautiful hands touch dishwater?
[Marge giggles.]Ultrahouse:No, I’m asking.Marge:Oh… uh… Not a very good one?Ultrahouse:Damn straight.

Mrs. Krabappel:Sloppy work as usual. Lisa’s casting spells at an eighth-grade level; you’ve sinned against nature.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XIII

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Kent Brockman:Like comedy clubs in the late ’80s, these ravenous clones are everywhere. They destroyed every building in town except Moe’s Tavern, which is reporting record business.

Marge:The horde is almost dead! There’s still some writhing and twitching, but that should stop by morning.Homer Clone:Good news.Marge:Mmm, [kisses the Homer Clone] One handsome hubby is all I need. [continues kissing the clone, then gasps in shock] No belly button? You’re a clone! Then the real Homer…Homer Clone:First over cliff.Marge: [gasps] My Homie is dead? How will I go on?Homer Clone:You like back rubs?Marge:Oh well.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror XIV

Segments

Best Segment

Quotes

Lisa:Dad! You’ve become the new Grim Reaper!Homer:No way, forget it. I might occasionally kill out of anger, or to illustrate a point. But I am not a Grim Reaper! (the robe sucks in his groin) Ow! Ow! I’ll reap! I’ll reap already!

Visual Gags

Every year since 1990, The Simpsons has aired a Halloween episode each October (and for about a decade in early November-thank World Series). The writers abandon all realism in favor of scares and laughs. Here’s what I believe are the best segments from all the Treehouse series. I only chose one segment from each special because I would be writing forever if I reviewed each segment. However, I will include memorable quotes and visual gags from most segments in order of airing.

Let’s get this started! Halloween is winding down!

Treehouse of Horror I

The first Treehouse of Horror and the only one to be set in the treehouse. In this installment, Bart and Lisa try to outdo each other with scary stories with Homer listening below.

Segments

Best Segment

James Earl Jones (who voices a mover and a narrates Poe’s famous poem with Homer as the man tormented by a raven who looks like Bart. Would you believe this segment caused students to become interested in Poe’s work?

Quotes

Evil Spirit: They are all against you, Bart. You must kill them all. They all must die.

Bart: Are you my conscience?

Evil Spirit: I… Yes, I am.

Homer: Mr. Ploot, Homer Simpson here. When you sold me this house, you forgot to mention one little thing. You didn’t tell me it was built on an Indian burial ground! No, you didn’t! Well, that’s not my recollection! Yeah? Well, all right, goodbye!

Homer: He says he mentioned it five or six times.

Lisa: It chose to destroy itself rather than live with us. You can’t help but feel a little rejected.

Marge: Well, thank you very much, Mr.—

Serak the Preparer:To pronounce it correctly, I would have to pull out your tongue.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror II

Lisa, Bart and Homer have nightmares after eating too much candy on Halloween. The titles of each segment are The Monkey’s Paw (Lisa’s nightmare), The Bart Zone (Bart’s Nightmare), and If I Only had a Brain (Homer’s nightmare).

Segments

Best Segment

Based off a Twilight Zone episode “It’s a Good Life”, Bart has the ability to bend reality with his mind, read someone’s mind, and can turn anyone who says anything bad about him into anything he wants. It’s filled with a lot of great gags and has a hilarious ending that makes sense in 10-year-old Bart’s mind.

Quotes

Marge: Homer, where’d you get the monkey’s paw?Homer:I got it from the stand…over..there. (points to an empty space. A gust of wind is blowing sand around)Homer:Oh, wait. It’s over there.Merchant:You will be sorry.

Homer:I’ll make a wish that can’t backfire! I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce, and mustard, and… I don’t want any zombie turkeys, I don’t wanna turn into a turkey myself, and I don’t want any more weird surprises, you got it! (Homer eats)… Mmm, not bad, nice hot mustard, good bread, turkeys a little dry… THE TURKEY’S A LITTLE DRY!!!

Kang:That board with a nail in it may have defeated us, but the humans won’t stop there. They’ll make bigger boards and bigger nails. Soon they’ll make a board with a nail so big it will destroy them all!

Mrs. Krabappel:Well, class the history of our country has been changed again, to correspond with Bart’s answers on yesterday’s test. America was now discovered in 1942 by… ”some guy.” And our country isn’t called America any more. It’s Bonerland.

Football announcer: The kick is up…it’s looking good…The ball is turning into a fat bald guy! (f) And it’s no good, and you know what we say every time something strange happens, it’s good that Bart did that, it’s very good!

Krusty:Well, we’re still on. 346 consecutive hours. And all because of one little boy who…WHO WON’T LET ME STOP!! Anyway, now let’s go and see if Sideshow Mel has any more of those legal, over-the-counter wake-up drugs of his!

Visual Gags

The Simpsons host a Halloween party for Bart and Lisa’s friends. After Homer eats a Halloween activity, Lisa, Abe, and Bart tell scary stories to the group.

Segments

Best Segment

This was a tough one for me, but by a hair, I chose Treehouse III’s final segment as it has a better overall story. The first segment is extremely quotable and introduced the world to frogurt.

Quotes

(Bart opens Grampa’s gift, a box of cash)Marge:Where’d you get all the money?Grampa: The government. I didn’t earn it, I don’t need it, but if they miss one payment I’ll raise hell.

Homer:Do you sell toys?Shopkeeper:We sell forbidden objects from places men dare to trade… We also sell frozen yogurt, which I call “frogurt”.Homer:Yeah, well I need something for my son’s birthday.Shopkeeper:Ah… Perhaps this will please the gentleman…(The shopkeeper reaches the shelf and takes the Krusty doll.)Shopkeeper:Take this object… But beware, it carries a terrible curse.Homer:Ooo, that’s bad…Shopkeeper:But it comes with a free frogurt!Homer:That’s good!Shopkeeper:The frogurt is also cursed.Homer:That’s bad…Shopkeeper:But you get your choice of topping!Homer:That’s good!Shopkeeper:The toppings contain potassium benzoate.(Homer stares at the shopkeeper.)Shopkeeper:That’s bad.Homer:Can I go now?

Grampa: That doll is evil, I tells ya. Evil! Eeeeeeviillll!!!

Marge: Grandpa, you said that about all the presents.

Grampa:I just want attention.

Patty: There goes the last lingering thread of my heterosexuality.

Homer: The doll’s trying to kill me and the toaster’s been laughin’ at me!

Repairman:Yep, here’s your problem. Someone set this thing to “Evil.”

Burns:What do you think, Smithers?

Smithers:I think women and seamen don’t mix.

Burns:We know what you think.

Carl: Hey, I heard we’re goin’ to Ape Island.

Lenny: Yeah, to capture a giant ape. I wished we were going to Candy Apple Island.

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror IV

Bart hosts this year’s installment, but Marge and Maggie keep interrupting him as he tries to introduce the three segments. This is one of the best overall Halloween episodes, along with the next installment.

Segments

Best Segment

I’m going with the middle segment because this one scared the crap out of me as a child. Something about that gremlin just freaks me out.

Quotes

Homer: Flanders?! You’re the devil?!

Devil Flanders: It’s always the one you least expect.

Devil Flanders: Now remember, the instant you finish it, I own your soul for–(Homer has already scarfed all but a small crumb of the donut)

Homer: Hey, wait. If I don’t finish this last bite, you don’t get my soul, do you?

Devil Flanders: Uh, technically no, but–

Homer: (singing)I’m smarter than the Devil. I’m smarter than the Dev–(Flanders turns into a huge demon)

Devil Flanders: YOU ARE NOT SMARTER THAN THE DEVIL! I’ll see you in Hell yet, Homer Simpson!

Bart: I just had a vision of my own horrible fiery death.

Skinner: Hello, Simpson. I’m riding the bus today because Mother hid my car keys to punish me for talking to a woman on the phone. She was right to do it.

Homer: It sure was nice of Mr. Burns to invite us for a midnight dinner at his country house in…Pennsylvania!

Chief Wiggum: Oh, right. How are you going to get them? Skeleton power?

Groundskeeper Willie: I’ll strike where you cannot protect them… in their dreams!

Homer: Hello? Can anybody hear me?

Marge: Homer, where are you?

Homer: I’m somewhere where I don’t know where I am!

Marge: Do you see towels? If you see towels, you’re probably in the linen closet again.

Homer: Just a second! … No

Chief Wiggum: Take that, you lousy dimension!

Visual Gags

Treehouse of Horror VII

Segments

Best Segment

This segment is still relevant today. All you have to do is switch out the names of the candidates.

Quotes

Dr. Hibbert:But what to do about poor Hugo? Too crazy for Boy’s Town, too much of a boy for Crazy Town! The child was an outcast! So, we did the only humane thing.

Homer: We chained Hugo up in the attic like an animal and fed him a bucket of fish heads once a week.

Marge: It’s saved our marriage.

Bart: You’re crazy!

Hugo: Am I? Well, perhaps we’re all a little crazy. I know I am. I went mad after they tore us apart, but I’ll be sane… once I sew us back together.

Bart: But you’ll kill both of us.

Hugo: No, it’s easy. Look, I’ve been practicing: I made a pigeon-rat.

Dr. Hibbert: That means the evil twin is and always has been…Bart. (They all turn around and stare at Bart.)

Bart: Oh, don’t look so shocked.

Lisa: I’ve created Lutherans!

Kang:Abortions for all!

Crowd: Boo!!!!

Kang:Very well, no abortions for anyone!

Crowd:Boo!!!!

Kang: Abortions for some! Miniature American flags for others!

Crowd:Yay!!!!!

Kang:It does not matter which way you vote. Either way your planet is doomed! DOOMED!

Kodos:My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball, but tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward, upward not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.