When reports surfaced in July that Donald Glover would be playing a much smaller role on NBC’s cult favorite Community, comedy nerds were understandably disappointed. But comedy nerds also knew that Glover is an incredibly talented guy and that he couldn’t play Troy forever. He’s already become a relatively successful hip-hip artist — under the Childish Gambino moniker — and, we would come to learn in August, that he was working on his own series for FX. All seemed well– until last night when Glover took to Instagram to post a series of handwritten, soul-baring admissions.

“I feel like I’m letting everyone down,” one note began. “I’m afraid people hate who I really am. I’m afraid I hate who I really am. I’m scared people will find out what I masturbate to. I’m afraid I’m here for nothing. I feel that this will feel pretentious.”

Glover also talks business within the series of Instagram posts, explaining that “I didn’t leave Community to rap. I don’t wanna rap. I wanted to be on my own,” following up with, “I’ve been sick this year. I’ve seen a bunch of people die this year. This is the first time I’ve felt helpless. But I’m not on that. Kept looking for something to be in with. Follow someone’s blueprint. But you have to on your own.”

You can view the rest of his notes below.

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About the Author

Dylan P. Gadino

Dylan is the founder and editor in chief of Laughspin. He launched Punchline Magazine in 2005 (which became Laughspin in the summer of 2011) with childhood friend Bill Bergmann. Dylan lives in northern New Jersey with his wife and two sons. He hopes the Shire is real.

Well it’s no surprise, the Residence Inn Marriot makes everyone feel that way.

I’m just kidding I don’t even know where that is. But from a purely observational standpoint sounds like depression, something that sadly is pretty common among comedians. Hope he gets well or gets treatment soon.