Wednesday, October 07, 2009

When All I Have is Hope..

I learned to believe.

I learned that guys in books are better, but are not real. Most happy endings are found in what I read, but real endings are much better because they make you learn the hard way. Though bittersweet, you can be proud that you worked hard for it. That you made the storm pass without letting yourself down. And the aftermath will make you a better person. It will make you go places you never thought possible. And it can help you have faith even in a tiny flicker of light. Or in my case, a butterfly that's been hanging around my room the other day. :)

Yesterday, the thorn that's been pricking my heart has finally lightened its way. I am unsure if it will take a long time to finally heal, but I needed it to. Because I believe that God still paved way for me to understand everything that's been missing in my life. I now wanted to face the real world. I've been a brat for too long, so now I know better. I also learned how to listen now. That no matter how hurt I am, I am still responsible for my actions. Tama si Miss Che, that we have gone a long way, I dont have the right to assassinate everything because of how I feel for now. That someday, I might regret the things that I said during that spur of a moment. :)

On a lighter note, will be doing something special over the weekend. Something Ive always wanted to do, but didnt have the time to. Sabi nga ni Karen, corporal works of mercy, but really, I needed to do this because I have always been blessed at home, at work, and most of all in my life. That no matter how I'm having problems now, I am still lucky. And I am still loved. By God and by my friends.

Speaking of friends, I'm very very thankful that I can lean on them in times like these. I feel really pampered. :) Special mention to Karch, whom I know I can dwell by problems with, as I do with hers. To JM, who never turned his back on me even though Ive hurt him before. Also to Cris, whom I never thought could be a friend, but I was wrong. My bestfriend Mercie can be busy with her kids, but she never fails to share her shoulder when I cry. To Jeuel and Chie, Menchie, whom have been my pillars through the pain. And basically to everyone I forgot to say. Your outpour of concerns made me realize that I have all the love in this world and nothing can change that happy feeling.

Hopefully, this will be better. Because I hope. And I believe in hoping for the best. :)