Wednesday, February 25, 2015

I am in a coffee shop that is playing strictly oldies- mostly
Motown, some classic rock.
And I am loving every minute of it.

A few favorites so far include “Signed, Sealed, Delivered”, “My
Girl”, and “Heard it Through the Grapevine”.

Blame it on the coffee but my left foot simply will not stop stomping to the beat and my mouth refuses to
stay closed. I must sing and
dance to this music. To do anything else would be inhumane and just plain silly.

Currently hidden away in a tight corner near the front door
sets me in a position to see the entire room as I peer up from my laptop like a
groundhog announcing its innocence and optimism inviting a new season to the
earth.

One by one, people shuffle in from the cold winds and grey
sky wearing long and sophisticated-looking jackets. They all seem to retrieve their wallets from their
right pocket with the same swift hand gesture as smooth as whipped cream on
pecan pie.

There is something about shared space with strangers that is
beyond beautiful to me. We all share the same air, the same need (warm drink, food), and we all try to act like we are the only one in the room. We check our
phones, we keep our eyes down robotically as the guy behind the counter
announces “Americana on the bar” or “Large Latte up”.

Monday, February 23, 2015

The sun peers in through the window like a child playing
peek-a-boo. Its light is sneaky but warm. Its morning rays are nothing but a
gift to our neighborhood, and against the pale blue sky, it is magical on this
early Monday morning.

Gypsy, my roommate’s cat, leans over the windowsill. Her
nose is pressed against the glass window like that of a child’s as she stares into
her favorite store at Christmas. It is as if Gypsy is trying to lean herself
into the earth on the other side, thinking the glass is an optional barrier,
easy to defeat. Her white-as-snow front paws dance around the edge as she takes
every ounce of outside in. Her ears perk up at the sound of the train passing
by and her head bobs back and forth like a toy ship in the bathtub.

Gypsy is
beyond curious about what's outside that window.
I think she could sit up
there for hours.

This cat has so many layers. Sometimes she bites your
fingers when you try and pet her back. Out of instinct, you shake your hand
obnoxiously to ease the pain while she slips away and hides. Her teeth are tiny
but sharp. They curve in at the top like mountain peaks.

Lately, though, Gypsy has been coming into my room more,
just to say hello and look around. She can be kind and gentle when she wants to
be, and I think I have gained her trust a little bit more now.

And the way she leans at the windowsill, her eyes scanning
the pavement, I am drawn to her peculiar ways. Gypsy is so in awe of the
world, just like me.

I lean over the windowsill at the edge of my heart most
mornings. I look into the day with questions, eager to explore, eager to play.
All senses are engaged and activated as I blink my way into a new day, my alarm
announcing the time with urgency and demand.

What’s next? My eyes
ask as I lean over my heart's windowsill and let my face be warmed by the sun. Where
can I explore and dig in a little bit? Maybe I will find new places to hide today,
new places to run.

Sunday, February 22, 2015

It’s amazing what five days of icy roads and slippery snow
can do to your schedule.

Spoiler alert: It kills it.

I had planned a busy week as usual. A meeting about my
future radio podcast (!), webinars at work about community
organizing and activism, an Ash Wednesday service to attend at the A-frame Chapel at Vanderbilt, a networking event for young professionals in the
nonprofit sector, and then topping it all off with a weekend visit from my mom.

None of these things happened.

Most of them are rescheduled.

But life goes on without our plans. I was reminded this week
that I am not in control. No matter how hard I try, I cannot control the
weather… or really anything.

But this week was a true gift.

Here are some highlights of what happened instead.

Monday-

I had a conversation with my old roommate and sweet, smiley
friend in California… I mean like really smiley… as in she is probably the most
joyful person on the planet. (Picture Mrs. Clause as a 20-something). Even the
sound of her voice is like listening to a song- upbeat and melodic. We talked
about her megabus adventure coming up this spring including her visit to
Nashville when we will do lots of hiking, camping, and tree-climbing. This
friend belongs outside, and when I am with her, I remember that I am too.

I watched the Saturday Night Live40th year anniversary show with friends. We ate chex-mix and brownies and drank Blue
Moon. I can’t tell you the last time I watched SNL. I also can’t tell you the
last time I laughed that hard.

I watched Two Weeks Notice with my roommate. And let me tell
you, Hugh Grant’s accent is still adorable after all these years.

Tuesday-

I played on Garage Band for hours on end. I’ll just sum it
up this way: piano, harmonies, beat boxing. I felt like a kid in a candy
shop, losing track of time and overly excited about the beauty of raw sound.

I discovered a beautiful new movie called Life of a King. Reminded me that life is not about our past. It’s
about giving and laughing and forgiving yourself and your neighbors.

Wednesday-

Slowed down a LOT (by this point I am feeling the weight of
the snow against my chest and the ice under my boots) and sipped on some ginger
tea while reading The Way of Tea and Justice by Becca Stevens, AKA the most hilarious, humble hero ever. It’s
funny, I can hear her thick Southern accent so clearly when I read her writing.
I feel like she is sitting beside me, laughing and crying at her own words, her
feet kicked up and her Justice Tea glued to her fingers. Thoughts around self-care,
mini-retreats, beams of mysterious and heavenly light, grieving and
celebrating, and learning how to rest floated off the pages for me, like
writing in the water, flowing gracefully and staring back at me with wonder.

I took a friend to yoga… or she took me because I was still
too scared to drive and she’s from New Hampshire and laughs in the face of
Nashville “snow” days.

I watched some episodes of Lost with the sweetest boy I know. And then we had
breakfast for dinner with friends and I had one too many cinnamon rolls.

Thursday-

I went to a beautiful restorative flow yoga class. There was
lots of deep stretching and headstand mastering involved. The teacher was
patient, playful, and kind. It was sort of like a therapy session for the body
and mind. I swallowed each word like tea and let it soothe my inner sanity in
this toasty, toasty room.

I had chips and queso in the middle of the afternoon with an
old friend for no reason other than we love the queso at Rosepepper. We changed
topics every 5 seconds, like squirrels chasing an acorn. That’s how our
friendship works and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Friday-

More yoga with more twists and chaturangas. The teacher came
over and adjusted my hips at one point. It made all the difference in the world.

I finished the book The Way of Tea and Justice and tears fell, one after the other, as I read the
last chapter describing the opening day of Thistle Stop Café over a year ago
now. I imagined the smiles of the women who had been picked up off the streets- some of them, literally the day before this event. I could feel the love in
that room like a hand-knit sweater over my shoulders as I felt the warmth of
each hug and embrace across the room.

I had dinner at my neighbors’ house as we discussed movies
and the disturbingly biased criminal justice system in the States over seafood
stew, salad and bread. I felt centered, happy to be alive, happy to be
breathing, tasting, talking.

SO.

This is life uninterrupted. This is spontaneity in the midst
of rejection- rejection of schedules, rejection of normality, smooth roads and
transitions. This is life untouched- untouched by expectation, routine or
deadlines.

This is my life in a snow week, where icy roads separate me
from a Brentwood office temporarily transformed into an ice skating rink.

Yes, I watched a lot of movies and episodes of Lost. And no, I am not ashamed. Because here’s the thing-
I also slowed down and got a lot of sleep. I had time for longer conversations,
deeper breathing, less driving.

About Me

meeting new people is my heart's delight. i cherish each day because i know there is purpose wrapped up in every waking moment. i love to play in the great outdoors and listen to the music of the sweet birds that call me home.