Chapter 409: In Which Our Hero, Having Recovered From Eating British Food, Must Convince Several Villagers To Buy A Freshly Caught Haddock

Woah there, Rex, don’t go touchin’ that slimy piece of stuff. That there is another one of those dangerous weapons that the humans left behind after they killed themselves off. I’m pretty sure that one there bursts into flames if you touch it. You’d be on fire quicker than you could say “Squirrel!”. L:eave it be and if we’re lucky, a lizard or somethin’ will set it off and it’ll be gone. Hey, is that a big pile of bison dung over there? By Dog, I think it is! Let’s go have a roll!

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The Doclopedia #639

Don’t Touch That!: Round Thing

Geeby, do NOT touch that! I don’t care if that other little sproutling did, YOU will not be touching things, especially rare Third Dynasty crystal spheres! That thing is worth many millions of norebs and if you damaged it, our entire family would be sent to the Opigop Forest to harvest sluumig nuts for the rest of our lives. Now come along with me and keep your tendrils to yourself, mister!

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The Doclopedia #640

Don’t Touch That!: Cold Thing

No, I’m not kidding, Glitterleaf, that’s really a Coldbeast egg. You touch that and straight away, it will chill you to the bone. After that, it takes about three seconds to hatch and then the baby Coldbeast bites you, freezes you and then begins to eat your sorry Elven ass. Now get the hell away from it and help us find that dungeon entrance!

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The Doclopedia #641

Don’t Touch That!: Metallic Thing

Ahh, best not to touch that particular item, Sir Cecil. It is a Prussian Robotrooper and while I am fairly certain that it has been rendered harmless, it is best not to take chances. That one spinning saw hand alone would slice you up like a Christmas goose. The gun hand? Oh, even without bullets, it makes for a deadly club. Now perhaps we should move along to my Invisibility Suit?