Internet's parallel universe can lure teens into trouble

Many parents limit the amount of time their teenagers spend on the phone. Ditto for the amount of time parked in front of the television or playing video games.

But parents may be less likely to limit the amount of time teens spend online. After all, isn't surfing the Internet a much better use of a teen's time than zonking out in front of yet another rerun of "That '70s Show"?

Though the Internet can open a world of educational opportunities for teens--the chance to research almost any topic while honing computer skills--it also can spell trouble. Big trouble. And it's not just porn sites and online predators that are causing problems for American teens. There is an even greater problem, according to the experts: Internet addiction.

There are no hard numbers to indicate just how many teenagers are becoming addicted to the Internet, but psychologist Kimberly S. Young of the Center for Online Addiction estimates that 5 percent to 10 percent of Internet surfers suffer from some degree of Internet addiction.

It's not difficult to figure out why the Internet has such tremendous appeal for teenagers. For one thing, they're members of the so-called Internet generation, the first generation to feel totally at ease with computers.

"Being online is like breathing to them," Young said.

Barbara Cooke of Deerfield agrees. Her 16-year-old daughter, Jenny, would rather spend time online than talking to her friends on the phone. Cooke said, "Teens today are using the phone lines less and less and instant messaging software more and more."

Jenny agreed with her mother's take on the situation and explained why she is more inclined to spend time in the evening instant-messaging six or seven friends at the same time rather than picking up the phone to call someone: "When you're online, you can be talking to more than one person and doing more than one thing at a time.

"When you're talking on the phone, you have to be a lot more involved in the conversation."

Something else that adds to the appeal of cyberspace is the fact that teenagers have the power to reinvent themselves. It doesn't matter if a teenager is quiet and introverted in real life. He or she can instantly morph into a popular, extroverted football player or cheerleader the moment he or she grabs hold of that computer mouse.

Teenagers also may be seduced by the ease with which Internet friendships can be made, said John Suler, professor of psychology at Rider University in Lawrenceville, N.J., and author of the online book "The Psychology of Cyberspace."

"Internet relationships can feel safer to teenagers than face-to-face relationships. Some teens feel that they can be more open in how they express themselves and may worry less about rejection because they can't see or be seen by the other person.

And, what's more, the instant intimacy of online relationships can have them pouring out their heart and soul to someone who seems to be a soul mate."

Another major draw is the fact that the Internet makes it possible to connect with large numbers of people who share the same interests--something that may or may not be possible in real life. As Henry Jenkins, co-editor of "From Barbie to Mortal Kombat: Gender and Computer Games" (MIT Press, $19.95) said, "In a small-town school, there may be only one goth or openly gay student. On the Web, there are thousands, if not millions."

Though the Internet has a lot to offer kids who feel like social outcasts, that feeling of being connected doesn't necessarily come without a price. According to Young and Suler, Internet use can become a problem if the real world begins to pale in comparison to the fantasy world that an Internet user creates online.

And because most teens tend to lead rich fantasy lives, they easily can get hooked on the larger-than-life dimensions of the Internet, creating a parallel universe for themselves in the online world, a world in which they're the ones calling the shots.

Invisible addiction

What makes the problem worse is the fact that Internet addiction can be almost invisible: "It's easy to assume that teenagers are `working' when they're sitting at the computer, when, in fact, they may not be working at all," Suler said.

"Teens can be very secretive in general, and it's not very difficult for them to disguise what they are doing online. A simple click is all it takes to replace a chat window with a window containing a paper for class. Part of an adolescent's efforts to establish his or her own identity involves that need to keep secrets about themselves from their parents. The Internet is the perfect way to do that."

Suler isn't the only person to pick up on the fact that parents often are clueless about what their teens are up to online. A recent Canadian study involving more than 5,000 children and teens revealed that 70 percent of parents know little or nothing about their kids' online activities.