HABIT helps people find courage in facing dementia

For those of you who are regulars to the blog, you know I often reflect on a special Mayo Clinic program called HABIT.

Healthy Action to Benefit Independence and Thinking (HABIT) is a 2-week program for persons impacted by mild cognitive impairment or early stage dementia and their support partner.

A few days ago I completed another HABIT program with 26 participants-persons living with cognitive impairment, spouses, partners and adult children.

This comprehensive, holistic intervention program involves daily memory compensation training, brain fitness, supportive small group therapy, yoga and mindfulness, along with wellness conversations and action planning.

It's more common than not during the first couple of days in the HABIT program to see and feel tension, uncertainty, and uneasiness in those attending. This makes sense; it must take a great amount of courage to show up, gather with a group of strangers and focus on something that stirs up so much fear. And at the same time, it takes sufficient courage to be faced with the risk of allowing our true selves, weaknesses and all, to be seen.

The special thing that participants soon discover is that HABIT is a place where imperfection, fear and sadness are not only allowed; they are embraced and welcomed with compassion.

We feel connection and belonging when we are around others who share in our experiences, our imperfections and our struggles. In this way, we are connecting on the deepest levels that call to us as human beings. And with this connection comes the courage to be who we are, and to believe that who we are — memory loss or not — is more than enough.

Conversely, when we are attempting to hide our flaws we are actually disconnecting from the very connection we need and long for.

Author and researcher Brene Brown in her book "The Gifts of Imperfection" states that owning our story can be difficult but not nearly as difficult as running from it and that embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging. She says that only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover infinite power of our light.

My sincerest gratitude to all the courageous and loveable individuals I was fortunate to spend these past weeks with. From Brown's Book: "We have to be brave with our life so others can be brave with theirs."

11 Comments Posted

to ann: your mom needs enough fluid it is water, tea. Enough fluid is for the blood is fluid, because the brain need this with the nution for the brain.The medication is to check, also alcohol, alcohol in the medication, because it all have to be in connection with the other. And so the paranoia will gone. But it is not all, your mom need anything to do what she like to do.
So she is better in the realy world. I wrote a book, Rediscover, Recovery Practical Reference Training. I am a caregiver and a therapist for a long time.

susangab

June 10, 2013 9:05 p.m.

Besides the HABIT Program, that is not available to all of us at this time, the paperback book and workbook by Dr. Amit Sood, &quot;Train Your Brain, Engage Your Heart, Transform Your Life&quot; has been life saving to me being an 11 year health advocate (caregiver). Actually, I would use it as the text book in a support group for caregivers. Dr. Sood fully explains neurologically why as caregivers we have to take care of ourselves, mind and body. It helps one put all in one's life at peace whatever the circumstances . Please read and let us know how it helped you to be at peace and joyful! ISBN 9781452898056

Kristina

June 10, 2013 6:21 p.m.

I'm with you, Ella, chances of participating are slim to none. So there are a lot of out here who are desperate for help. And there is not a lot of it around.

Jane

June 3, 2013 8:18 p.m.

I am really discouraged Ever since my mom got sepsis three years ago she is exhibiting signs of dementia. She is going through paranoia. Her doctor has her on medication but it does seem worse. I love her so much and I want to fix this

Ann

May 31, 2013 8:40 p.m.

looking at this post i wonder if you all could recommend alternative readings etc. to assist someone new to this journey? My husband is beginning his second leg of this trip. thx dale

Dale

May 31, 2013 8:28 a.m.

I would love to see something like this offered in our area. This sounds like a great opportunity for both the person with MCI and the caregiver, but not many can afford to spend 2 weeks in Jacksonville. Any possibility it will be disseminated in a way that's more accessible for everyone?

liz

May 30, 2013 9:04 p.m.

As one who participated in the last HABIT group, I will say it was a fantastic experience. I highly highly recommend it for people with MCI and the care partners. Love you guys!!!

Denise

May 30, 2013 2:28 p.m.

Well said, Angela!

Ray

May 30, 2013 11:56 a.m.

I don't know if an outline of the habit course could be offered on line, I have mci just now, and anything really useful to many in my position would be very appreciated. I am on nameda 2x and aricept 2x per day, and so far my memory is not slipping too fast. Thanks.

lowell

May 30, 2013 11:43 a.m.

Looking at response #1, I'd like to know what MCI is vs HABIT. Then, if HABIT is so life enhancing to both patient and care giver, why not offer it on line? I go to a monthly support group and understand how self disclosure can be a relief, but my traveling to a Mayo Clinic to take a two week course would be the equivalent of participating in a trip to Mars. That is such a labor intensive program -- a tiny droplet in the bucket for the millions of people who need help.

Ella

May 29, 2013 8:58 p.m.

Wish I grew up with the HABIT program. Grateful my husband and I took the course at Mayo Jacksonville 6 weeks ago. Little, by little we are putting patterns we learned in our daily routines. Sounds backwards, but I had an important trip to DC right after the course, so all attention went to trip preparation for my husband to be safe while I was out of town. HABIT teaches us the easiest ways to be organized and prepared for the unknowns...one must take care of themselves. Somehow this gives us a feeling of sense of control over whatever happens in our daily lives.
No matter how many times my doctors and my husband's doctors, were all telling me to take care of myself instead of just focussing on my husband, I just didn't get it until HABIT.
Since the course ended, I have made a very important decision that will make our lives much simpler. Oh, how relieved and joyful am I.
It'll take about a month to complete, but our lives will be so much richer personally as a result. MCI or not, life is not easy...and MCI makes it so demanding and frustrating, when we want to do something else with our time left on earth but feel trapped to do the correct thing and our love goes with that. Tired, one gets so tired, of the same things ....trapped! Somehow, now have we have made a major decision to take care of both of us by eliminating a part of our life we use to feel was so important to us. It wasn't-it was our ego.
This came out of HABIT. May surprises begin in you!

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