Georgia Under Attack

Atlanta Constitution, September 2008: Not since General Sherman marched through the "Peach State" in 1864 have the people of Georgia felt so violated. In this case it wasn't the "Damn Yankees" but our southern brothers of North Carolina who crossed our northeastern border.

General Ulysses S. Putin of the North Carolina Militia said "we all are just protecting our ethnic brothers who reside in the abutting Georgia border counties of Union through Rabun, from those Georgia Crackers!"

Tennessee had threatened to invade its northern abutting Georgia counties of Dade through Fannin for reasons similar to those of North Carolina. However cooler heads prevailed and a pacification program, under the direction of former Vice President Al Gore, was undertaken. Large quantities of Jack Daniels Tennessee Sour Mash Whiskey (black label) have been quietly smuggled into north Georgia, leaving the residents very mellow.

Former Texas Governor and now President George W. Bush has offered to mediate the dispute, provided the "Tar Heels" go home.

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