26 identification, has received in print and on the air more publicity than has ever been gIven to any other organiza- tion dedicated to so special a purpose, and Hamilton College, which graduated him and of which he is a trustee, has also come into its just reward. He has not even neglected the Several :\1arx Brothers, an outfit which, from time to time, he appears to believe he invent- ed himself. Journalistically, all this has been sound and profitable, since there are many people who feel that they have heard more than enough about the state of the world. It has also called forth a certain amount of criticism, a few serious thinkers being of the opinion that Mr. 'VV oollcott's interests are rath- er peripheral, to put it mildly. There have even been moments of embarrass- 111ent when his protégés have backfired on him. There was, for instance, the story of Sergeant Quirt, which is probably as good a name for him as any. The saga of the Sergeant, who picked up his title as a member of the American Expedi- tionary Force, is practically endless. A literary though virile sort of man, he once worked for a newspaper syndicate, and there he was in the habit of return- ing a manuscript to its anxious author with a letter saying that it wasn't quite righ t, but that with a little professional advice, he was sure, it could be made to do. There was, now he happened to think of it, a literary agency that spe- cialized in juSt that sort of thing and, if the author cared to send his manuscript to them, he felt confident that-for a small fee, of course-they could tell him what repairs were necessary. The liter- ary agency, it turned out, was the Ser- geant masquerading as a post-office box, and he made a very nice little thing out of it until something slipped up and he was fired. After that he caused a tem- porary confusion in the publishing world by setting up a McClure Syndicate to compete with the real McClure Syn- dicate simply by going into business with a man whose name happened to be McClure. A pretty ingenious fellow all around was Sergeant Quirt. Mr. \V oollcott and the Sergeant had worked together on the Stars and Stripes, where they shared heroic ex- periences and a strong bond grew up between them. Back in this country, the friendship persisted and Mr. \'T ooll- cott invited his buddy to come and live in his apartment. The Sergeant had not yet affiliated himself with the newspaper syndicate, or indeed with any other employer, and he was without vis- L ible n1eans uf sup- / port. Mr. W 0011- cott's kindness provided him with a roof and n1eals, of course, but the Sergeant wanted other things from life, including a lit- tle pocket money. His host had gone to Europe,leaving him alone in the apart- ment, so he turned to other friends of his army days. He was. successful with them, so successful, in fact, that he made up his mind that he could afford to travel. Action always followed closely on decision with the Sergeant, and pres- ently, handsomely dressed and equipped with fine luggage, he was on his way to the Coast in a bus. He rode in peace, busy, no doubt, with his innocent plans, un til the bus reached a more or less deso- late portion of the \Vestern plains. Here an embarrassing thing happened. A pair of state troopers, appearing from no- where, drew up beside the bus and an- nounced grimly that they were looking for an escaped convict. Even as they spoke, a pale man in one of the front seats leaped to his feet and through an open window. Before the troopers could get clear of their roadster, Sergeant Quirt was in action. He, too, leaped through the window and took uff across the des- ert. The convict ran fast, but virtue lent wings to Quirt and he brought the man down not a hundred yards from the highway. When Quirt came back with his catch, the troopers were grateful and admiring. "It was nothing," said the Sergeant. The officers soon departed, taking with them the convict and a suitcase he claimed to be his. The bus rolled on, with Quirt the object of much fa- vorable comment. It had not gone many miles, however, before the same patrol car appeared beside it again and ordered the driver to stop. One of the troopers got out and stood 1n the highway. He was holding up a suitcase and he looked even more menacing than before. "^ ll . h " h . d " I .lî, ng t, e saI, no'ZJ.) want to know who in hell belongs to this bag." Sergeant Quirt took one look at it and sighed. " I d " h . d 0, e sal . "You?" said the trooper incredu- lously, recognizing the recent hero. "Yes," said Quirt. r , "O.K., buddy," said the troopeI, though still doubtful. "Then I guess you better come along." Quirt went, for he knev{ when he was licked, and he also knew that the suitcase, which fate had malignantly 111ixed up with the convict's, contained about as fine a set of plates for counter- feiting traveller's checks as you could buy east of the Alleghenies, as well as a neat bundle of Southern Pacific pay checks which he had turned out froln time to time on a little press he happened to have kicking around the house. ...... \Vhen this news finally reached ]\;1 r. \V oollcott, he was embarrassed. It was too bad, he cried; it was obviously just some innocent misunderstanding. In proof of all this, he would personally re- deem every dollar's worth of false checks that could be shown to have orie-inated ...... with his virtuous friend. He even had his lawyer make an announcement to that effect, and this was a mistake, because several thousand dollars' worth of pay checks which had been issued by the Ser- geant on previous business trips to the West were now joyfully presented for payment. Such a sum being somewhat beyond his means at the time, :\1r. ,,V oollcott was obliged to retract his offer and leave the Sergeant to the mercy of the State of California, which apparent- ly had the strongest claim on him, al- though Oregon and Nevada were mild- ly interested, too. Mr. \V oollcott, in fact, withdrew from the whole matter after arranging with the warden of San Quentin to get the Sergeant a set of false teeth, his own being in shocking condition. T HINGS like that hurt, because there can be little question that }VIr. \V ool1cott is one of the most sentimental Inen aJive in spite of his prickly exteri-