10 Reasons to Hate Presenters

Presenters. Perhaps the people responsible for the biggest waste of time in business.

Let me set the scene…

It’s Wednesday afternoon. You’ve got a crapload of work to get through and you’re fast running out of time.

You’ve got plans this evening. You’ve been looking forward to catching up with your friends for a few weeks now. It’s starting to look like you might have to cancel so you can get your reports done in time.

To top it all off, you’re now on your way to meeting room number 4, to listen to an impromptu presentation from the company president about “work/life balance”.

Not only are you irritated to have to listen to the president banging on for 40 minutes.

Not only are you frustrated that you would have “work/life balance” if only they would let you get your work done and cut out the useless presentations.

But you’re also annoyed that, like so many other people, the company president has no idea how to do a decent presentation. The next 40 minutes will be a waste of time for everyone in the audience.

If you’re frustrated too, here’s just 10 reasons to hate presenters.

1. They’re dicks

If I were to talk to you whilst staring at the graffiti on the wall behind me, drawing your attention to said graffiti by waggling a laser at it, you could reasonably point out I was a dick.

2. Their arms are like force fields surrounding the Death Star

At least they think they are. Despite wielding no power of value, the presenter’s arms are active. Actively protecting their bodies. Hands clasped in front, arms squeezing the life out of the presenter, all in a futile attempt to be invisible to the audience. Force fields work on Star Wars, not on stage.

3. They insist on proving they’re literate

Imagine your boss handing you a letter from HR and proceeding to read it to you word for word.