Many will blame Chaz Bono for turning our precious babies into transchildren once they see him thrusting his concave pelvis for Bruno Tonioli's delight on Dancing With the Stars. But has America ever considered the gender-questioning damage done to our youngsters by Seth Herzog? Sweet, which is (probably??) the LONGEST RUNNING independently produced weekly comedy show in America run by a man shuffling in a Wonder Woman outfit, celebrates 7 years of existence tomorrow night with a good old fashioned birthday blowout at Webster Hall. Janeane Garofalo and John Mulaney will be there and Patton Oswalt might drop by too. But not because he wants to, he just needs to get away from all the stinky garbage surrounding his luxury LES hotel!

Ever since Apple stopped putting optical drives in their MacBook Airs, I've been trying to figure out what to do with ALL THE USELESS CD PLAYERS in my apartment. Should I donate them to the underprivileged? Should I use them to incite a Party City looting free-for-all? I learned today there's a reason to keep at least one around for just another couple of days: Comedy Central announced the release date of TJ Miller's debut stand up album, The Extended Play E.P.

Among the fastest-rising comedy stars in the country, T.J. Miller, was named one of the "10 Comics to Watch" by Variety and one of the 12 Rising Stars of Comedy by Entertainment Weekly in 2008 and was included as one of ten comics to watch on COMEDY CENTRAL's "Hot List" in 2009. COMEDY CENTRAL Records releases T.J. Miller's "The Extended Play EP" CD on Tuesday, September 13.

Miller's potential is realized on this amazing hip-hop/pop/folk album and for the first time he’s expressing himself both emotionally and physically through music. With guest stars galore, great beats, and lyrics you’ll be chewing over for months or at least the rest of the evening, this is more than a comedy rap album – it's a life soundtrack you can play loudly in your car. With videos (featuring said star guests) being released in the weeks prior to and through the CD release, the album is being launched in anticipation of Miller's hour special on COMEDY CENTRAL, which debuts later this year.

I'm always amazed at how companies can reinvent their products to make them great. I remember when Orbit was a shit gum (really), inasmuch as you never saw commercials for it featuring hot white-girl twins on vacation, at the beach or getting their portraits done by hot white boys. Didn't black people chew gum, too? Well, today we live in the age of Everything Is Funny In Commercials where less emphasis is placed on socioeconomics and those who buy chewing gum. That said, Orbit gets credit for taking an early, different tack, glorifying the randomly strange, but also playing it a little safe by buttoning their ads with an attractive '60s-style English air hostess. Why? No idea. But that early work is why this ad featuring Ed Herbstman (The Mantzoukas Brothers, The Magnet Theater) is not only acceptable in its strangeness, but also eye-catchingly good. Watch the ad and find yourself not asking these questions: "Why is Ed bobbing for apples at a teenager's house party? Why is that bearded guy in a pool of apples? Why did Ed take him home?"

Maybe these two ads were meant to be book-ended. The domestic strife has caught up to Ed and now he's shipping his wife's wedding dress to a dead-letter office in Topeka. I like how Ed flawlessly opens the fusion box, though. Like it should have taken a million tries to get it right, but Ed nailed it in two. I could do without the bit with the kid at the end, though. No offense, Youngster.

According to Joseph Campbell's definition of a monomyth, or Hero's Journey, every great narrative -- whether it be a movie, television show, play or novel -- follows the same essential story line. A single character leaves his or her normal way of life after another character compels them to obtain a valuable object or perform an important task.

In Lord of the Rings, Frodo leaves the shire after Gandalf compels him to destroy the One Ring. In Star Wars, Luke leaves Tatooine after Obi Wan compels him to rescue Princess Leia. And in The Matrix, Neo leaves the matrix after Morpheus compels him to save mankind by defeating the machines.

In Brad Sacks Gets a Hand Job, writers Adam Levy and Connor Izzett deftly utilize the same basic story structure. A nerdy kid leaves behind nerdy pursuits after a friend tells him that a girl wants to give him a hand job. By inserting lowbrow sexual specifics and wackadoo characters into a tried and true structure, they come away with a show that is narratively satisfying, ridiculously funny and could probably serve them better as a full-length feature film. For all intents and purposes, they make a hand job seem like it's going to save the world.

Brad Sacks (Tim Dunn) is a nerdy high school freshman who spends his days breaking into song, dancing and being "sick" at Magic the Gathering. He gives this all up after his friend Megan (Abra Tabak) reveals that Jessica Sanders (Emily Axford), the "hottest girl in school," wants to give him a hand job. With the help of his best friend Jake (Michael Hartney), who repeatedly hits the nail on the head with dramatic audience addresses comparing Brad's journey to Frodo's journey, Brad sets off to prepare for his date with destiny. Along the way he is repeatedly disrupted by the misguided interference of his sexually adventurous parents Gerald and Suzane (Matt Fisher and Beth Appel, who also directed the piece) and the horrible advice of his older, Jersey Shore-esque brother Dan (Dan Black).

Like most journeys, Brad overcomes these obstacles to claim his prize, but unlike Frodo's destroying the ring or Neo's defeating the race of machines, the prize Brad claims in the end is nothing like what he thought he'd get at the beginning.