A small thanks

A week from now I’ll be flying to Toronto to begin the last leg of my book tour. (Click here for dates.) Somehow it’s still on the bestseller list and I owe that completely to you. And that’s why I’m doing a giveaway today. Leave a comment and I’ll choose a few of you to win either an autographed copy of the American version, the British Version, or the audio CD (whichever you choose.)

Also, if you really want a signed and personalized copy of the book for you (or for a gift) but you can’t make it to any of the tour stops you can contact Changing Hands (480.730.0205) to buy a book and I’ll sign one for you when I’m in Arizona. They ship all over the world.

Thanks again for all your amazing support. I literally couldn’t have done it without you.

A friend of mine, non-blog reader, told me she picked it up and, “didn’t get it.” I told her it is imperative that she go to the blog archives, read them all and then try again. I expect that she will want a signed book in a few days (or weeks, depending on how much else she has going on).

My first experience with your blog was when a friend read it at work and was laughing so hard she couldn’t speak. It was the day beyonce came to visit Victor. Been hooked ever since! The book was awesome!! Keep it up!

Seriously, I am going to come see you in Toronto. well, maybe, if I can get the courage to take public transit down town and brave the mass of people that are going to be there. Maybe I will bring my cat.

My daughter made a sand drawing in honor of you on our recent trip to the beach. It said “STABBY FEELING” and had a big giant knife. I will post the photo on the Facebook page. She is 8, but sneaked the book into the bathroom and read the Post-It Note Chapter. I thought her drawing was both creative and deeply disturbing.

I just have to say that you are awesome. I dont know how but you always seem to know when I am having a rough day and you post something that makes me laugh and pulls me out of my funk. Thank you for all of the laughter you have brought into my life since I found your blog last year.

You are awesome. I only read four blogs ( I work three jobs and have no time for frivolity), and the #1 choice I make if I have an extra busy day is YOUR blog. Thank you for sharing your life with all of us, it means a lot to me for sure.

Your book is made of awesome with sprinkles of awesomeness on top. And whipped cream. And cherry.
If I get one signed, I’ll donate mine slightly (ok, not so slightly, but clean) used copy to local library for others to enjoy.

I LOVE your blog and even make my husband read it from time to time…especially concerning taxidermy and Nater Tater. He laughs on the inside, which manifests as shaking his head on the outside, while I am laughing so hard, I’m rolling on the floor crying. Big difference between me and him, I guess. Anyway, the book would be great because I have a feeling that he would end up reading it if I wasn’t there to show him…

If I don’t win I’ll still buy a copy, but I figured this was worth a try, since winning a free book will free up the money I need to buy the bacon-flavored lip balm I have my eye on.
– Gina from the other end of Canada than the one you’re going to

When I read your blog, I am not allowed to drink any liquids, and to pee before, because I will either end up spitting all over my computer, or peeing my pants from laughter.
So thank you for that, you’re fantastic… and I have gotten all of my blogger friends addicted to your site!

Honestly, thank you for writing it. It seriously has gotten me through the last few months. Every time I’m starting to feel sad, I just pick it up and re-read a little bit.
You’re an amazing person, and we love you for absolutely everything you’ve done for us🙂
Hope you get to come to Pittsburgh one day so some fellow Lawsbians and I can meet you!!❤

I am loving that this has been so successful for you! And that I have contributed to your bottom line myself!😉 Since really at the end of the day it is all about me and my way of helping!😉
Enjoy Canada ‘eh!

I read your entire book in a day, and got strange looks when I laughed out loud at my kindle when I was walking the dog. I told the people giving me the looks that the dog is funnier than you’d think. Any way, you’re book is awesome. I thought you should know that.

I already have the Kindle version and plan on buying a hard copy when you come to Minnesota- Squeeeeeeee! So excited to say thank you to you in person! Thanks for the laughs and the tears and for teaching me to be furiously happy!

I have the kindle version of your book & I read it outloud to my husband & both of us were laughing till we cried. We both think you are fantastically hilarious! Wish I could make it to a book signing! Although…signing my Kindle could be a little awkward…

I just want to say that I find you hilarious. After talking on Facebook about some ridiculous things I have done to my husband a friend showed me Beyonce. I have been a loyal fan ever since. To be fair, my husband hates me now because I read most of your book to him, and victor would probably hate me if he heard my imitation of him, but I think it is all worth it. And after learning about some anxiety issues I had last year, I’m also glad I’m not the only one with weird justifications for the things I do. So to sum it up, you’re awesome.

I absolutely love your book! It made me laugh out loud. I am so glad that your book is still on the bestseller list and I’m making everyone I know read it. Thanks for writing it and I’m looking forward to anything else you publish!

Since I am in the UK *and* have a kindle edition of your book this might be my only chance to lay my hands on a signed paper copy! Love the book, read it in a single snotty with tears of laughter sitting. AND I just realised that it’s down to you that I never gave Castle a chance *shakesfist at Filion and his twine allergy*

I borrowed your book from the library and already have it back on my list of requests because I want to read it again. As a fellow social phobia-depression person, I love that you are so open about your challenges so that my challenges don’t seem quite so terrible. Thank you, thank you, thank you!! (and I would LOVE a copy of your book)

Congrats on your success! My wife and I love your blog. Glad you made it to Canada! Come for the people, stay for the health care. I hear you get a free chunk of tar sand if you get to Alberta. In Cape Breton they just give you a closed-down coal mine or something.

so stoked for your success! even more impressed that you’ve actually made it to all of your book tour engagements and haven’t found yourself stuck in a bathroom! (except of course thru that poster) You’re an awesome leader of a huge band of misfits😀

Unfortunately, none of your tour stops have come close enough for me to make it, but I’d love a signed book! Then I could send my unsigned copy that I bought when it came out to my best friend. I mean, I guess I could send *her* the signed copy, since we’re best friends and all, but…no, FTS, there’s a limit. The signed one is mine!

I tried to make it to the San Francisco signing, but it was just too far away. I read bits of the book aloud to my boyfriend when it first came out and he still brings up his favorite parts. He had not seen me so captivated by a book in a while. You are hilarious and inspiring and wonderful. Have fun on the last leg of the tour!

YAY! You deserve to have your book still at the top! It’s a fabulous book, and all the girls that I went on vacation with in May (while I was re-reading the book), went out and bought it as soon as they got back from Mexico, so they could figure out what the heck kept me roaring with laughter. Thank YOU for sharing your life with us and making this crazy anxiety-ridden, depression-prone world a little less scary. 🙂

I loved the book, so glad it’s still on the best seller list and I can’t wait for your next one (no pressure). I’d loooove a copy of the audio book. I’m not above bribing you with knitted wares or baked goods.

Jenny your book is awesome and deserves it’s place on the bestseller list! I laughed, I cried and just generally enjoyed it as much as anything I have read in a long, long time. Your emotional honesty is truly bravery to be admired and emulated. You rock, lady!!

I just finished listening to the audio version of the book and am waiting on the return of the hardback I own from a colleague who is reading it for our university book club. I’d love an additional copy to send to friends whom I keep RAVING to about how fantastic your blog/book/you-in-general are.

What’s green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.
(The American version, please. I’m getting threatening notices from the library to return your book that they obtained from another library, just for me. Now I’m curious, does the British version use different swear words? I dislike when I read or hear arse…especially “your fat…” directed at mine, except from Brits. We’re in America people, we have awesome cuss-words.)
Seriously, your book was a great read. Thank you.
~Holly

Holy shitsnacks! I’d totally accept an autographed American version! I have the kindle version and that’s admittedly pretty hard to autograph. Though I wouldn’t put it past you to try. You are nothing if not tenacious!

I would love either the American or British version. I have yet to read your book, but I’ve heard so much about it and can’t wait! Thank you for being so awesome Jenny!
P.S. Having your autograph on my bookshelf would make me the envy of my nerd friends!!! I think I might actually sleep with it under my pillow…

That would be amazing to have a signed book by you! I read my husband your blog especially the ones with Victor and you and he really likes Victor lol. He doesn’t get your since of humor or understand why I find you so hilarious! Thanks for being so awesome Jenny!

I loved the audiobook so so much. I am a home visitor, and so many times I caught my clients staring at me with concerned expressions from their windows as I sat in my car staring straight ahead and laughing uncontrollably as I listened to your tales! I would love a hard copy to share with these clients🙂

I tried so hard to stage an impromptu road trip to see you read in Chicago but it fell through at the last minute. If you, I’m very jealous of the folks on the last leg. Congrats on the best seller list, you definitely deserve it!

Just wanted to say thank you for doing what you do! I loved the book – laughed so hard coffee flew out of my nose and my husband was seriously concerned. My assistant, who shares my sense of humor, gave me a Juanita birthday card. Keep up the good work!

I would love a signed copy! I have the kindle version (which I loved to carry around with me and read in public so I could laugh maniacally and creep out strangers) and I’ve gotten all of my officemates addicted to your blog and your book. We’ve all started following you on Facebook and everytime you post something there are shouts around to office to let everyone know to read it! Wish your tour was coming somewhere closer to me (the middle of Central PA where nothing exists except Penn State where I work) so I could see you!

I’m pleased to report I already have a copy of your book, albeit, not a signed one. I am going to try and wrangle something so I can come see you in Toronto though and maybe you can sign that copy. That being said, I don’t want to take away the opportunity from anyone else to win the book so if you pick me just pass it along to the next person in line.

I’m so excited to see you in San Diego in a couple of weeks! I have the kindle version, but am totally going to buy a hard copy to ensure that this book is around a thousand years from now after the robots have taken over.

I’m totally going to need a new copy once my friends (who I read parts to and totally acted them out) finish reading my copy. They are all getting your Fridge magnet for x-mas! And my co-workers and I are planning a security test complete with “Notes” of our condition once the 15 minutes has past. You rock so much.

Comment comment comment free stuff yippee. I wanted to go to your book tour but you were i nSan Diego ,the closest you have come to my house butvthree hours away and I was having qdrenal insufficiency fueled depression so…I stayed at home. But if I get a giveaway from you I would find some creative way to display it…I have yet to figure out my creative ways but with hippy road kill collecting parents, me thinks my genetic predisposition to weird things are to my advantage.

I’m sadly going to miss your reading/signing in Portland since Jack White announced his tour dates first! So me and the rest of the fantastical fan girls that I was wrangling will hike up our red dresses and try and scoot on up to Seattle. Until then, and if you have free time in P-town check this place out, I think you’ll like it, like just a little bit. http://www.paxtongate.com/about.aspx. Oh, and a signed book would be pretty kick ass!

I’ve been patiently waiting for my public library to get an e-book version of your tome, so I haven’t had a chance to read it yet… but I’ve heard nothing but awesomely ridiculous things about it and can’t wait to get my grubby little paws on it!

best book I read all year! would love to have an autographed copy to have for my very very own…
alas, cannot come to your book signings (well, better said, dammit! I can’t go to your book signings … got conflicts, you know…)…smile, cheers! gwen L

At 42 years old, its been a really long time since I almost peed myself in bed – then I read your book last week. I was laughing SO hard, but managed to get where i needed fast enough. Good thing too – My husband was only mildly annoyed to be woken from a dead/sound sleep by my laughter. I can only imagine if he woke up b/c of damp sheets (then again, I guess I could have always blamed the dog).

I had to quit reading your book at night because I was laughing so hard I was keeping everyone else up (including the dogs). And I was also poking my husband with the book, asking “are you asleep??!” so I could read parts to him. He was amused by you, not so much by me.

Your book was absolutely awesome (I snorted lots and read many pages of it out loud to my husband…I read almost all of your blog to him as well)! I don’t live anywhere near any of the book tour sites, but my sister lives in Denver. So I sent her all the info for that one and told her to bring her Xanax bottle as it MUST get signed!😉

That is so awesome! I would love a copy since I haven’t picked one up yet! Hubby has a stupid rule that I have to read at least half the books in my to-read like before I go and fiendishly buy more. I usually argue that he just doesn’t understand my process.

Your book is one of the few my husband has actually read. He told me he wanted to read it because I laughed so much and he wante to be in on the joke. He was not disappointed. You’re amazing, Jenny. I’m glad I stumbled upon your blog last year.

“WE NEED MORE BOOKS LIKE THIS ONE!” (words over a pic of Juanita the Weasel) or this “THE BOOK MADE ME SCREAM WITH LAUGHTER” I want an American version of the book unless you have in the British version tire spelled like tyre because that is cool how they misspell things in the UK. Forget it, do you have a Texas version and it is filled with fixin toos and y’alls because that is the version I would like to have.

Since I have purchased my own copy already, if I won, I would love to place it in an auction that I am holding in September to earn money for my cat. He needs surgery and I’m trying to get some really neat things to auction off. Your book would be an absolutely wonderful addition!

Jenny, you lighten life’s travails! I was thrilled to secure a copy of your timely tome from my local library to read, since I continue to be a displaced (unemployed) worker, no longer receiving benefits (yeah, you read that right). An autographed copy to grace my shelves would be over the top! I hope to hear more about the giant rooster’s travels in your sequel. THAT had me snorting non-stop in the middle of the night!

You know what? tell Mary Fairy godmother to take you to Colombia (she knows how to do it, plus she gives you tons of fairy dust yayyy) , honestly you’re amazing and it would be a pleasure to have you here.
You’re Better than Madonna and cheese and coca cola.

Jenny, you are awesome!! Don’t stop doing what you do. I think the world would be a happier place if more people collected oddly brilliant taxidermied animals. Sadly, I have yet to start my collection. Perhaps I can live vicariously through your book if I win a copy!!

Congratulations! I would love to win an autographed american version of your book! Thanks for the chance to win! I love your blog and especially your conversasions with Victor. I read them to my husband and we both just crack up. I also appreciate your honesty on depression, thank you.

Your book is great! Of course its still a best seller! Wish I could make it to your book signing when its out my way but I have this pesky thing called work getting in my way (*shakes fist at the unfair world*). Your blog has become apart of my morning coffee-procrastinate-starting-work-for-just-a-bit-more routine. Always brightens my day🙂

Tossing my name in because while I really want to pick up a copy of your book, I’ve been looking for steady employment since I finished grad school, and it’s not going to well..
I’m still going to try to come see you when you come to Toronto, though! Very exciting that you’re coming up here. You’ve been a wonderful inspiration on how to terrorize one’s significant other with overabundant enthusiasm for life.. and dead things, oddly enough.

So happy for you that your book is doing so well! I own a hardcover version of your book, and I was lucky enough to have you sign it for me when you came to MA. (I was the awkward red head who asked if it would be ok if I gave you a hug, and you were awesome and said yes, of course.) I would love to win an audio version of your book!

I laughed so hard I cried on the way to Yellowstone earlier this year…then I shared the book with my 16 year old daughter so she could enjoy it just as much on the way home from Yellowstone. It would be great to be a two copy household

So I introduced you to my sister. She also manages life with depression and you’ve been a big help. She bought your book, has attended the readings and everything. She was even so nice that she loaned me (poor college student) your book so I could read it. Which I was doing, and I was half way through when I had to go to school for the day. Well, while I was being an awesome student by attending class, my dogs ate the book. Now, the only other books they ever ate were the Harry Potter books, so I figure it’s a compliment. However, it wasn’t mine – so I’d like to enter the contest so I could return something other than compost to my sister. I’d also like to say that I’m very glad to see you have such success.

I haven’t laughed out loud reading a book like I did when reading yours possibly ever. I have issues with depression and autoimmune conditions also (lupus and RA) and reading your book/blog is the best medicine! I am in LA and wish I could make the trek to San Diego but it’s the week/weekend of my cousin’s wedding. If you sent me a signed copy from Phoenix I might just be an atheist who finally finds Jesus somewhere besides the kitchen!!!

Oooh I’m excited you’re still on the bestseller list. I wish I could afford a copy, but we’ve been scrimping for my dental work.

And when I say dental work I mean DENTAL WORK. I just had all my teeth removed. Well, all but two, those two were already missing. Which sounds pretty extreme, but it was the most reliable way I would get to chew food again. It’s definitely something to celebrate! I think I should get a tattoo to commemorate my liberation from dental pain, but I haven’t decided what the subject should be. Maybe a dead Cavity Creep?

Anyway, a toast to celebrations of all kinds! (Mine is non-alcoholic, because I’ve been told pain pills and booze don’t mix. I don’t believe it, but I’m a cautious soul.)

Although I own and have indeed read your book, I think it would be fun to hear it read by you, so count me in for the draw for the audio version! And congratulations on your book – it’s definitely a pant-wetter. Can’t wait to meet you in T.O.!

Thanks to you introducing me to the lifestyle of Beyonces, I now get tagged in any photo of metal chickens my facebook friends can find. I seriously think there are more “photos of me” as metal chickens as there are of actually “me”. Winning!

You really need to stop signing so many books… it is reducing the value of my “Personally signed by the author” book on EBay! Kidding!!! AS IF I WOULD EVER SELL MY PERSONALLY SIGNED BOOK!!!! I treasure it.

I have been stalking your website, I mean reading your website for years now. You make me laugh and make my day. I have the Kindle version of your book but id look to see the pictures in person. I mean in real copies.

Jenny, I have two grown nieces who live three thousand miles from me in the Atlanta, GA, area. I have recently learned, due to my crazed fan-rave about your upcoming tour through Seattle, that they are huge fans of you, your book, and your blog. You, Jenny Lawson, are bringing families together; forging common ground. Whatever. Anyway, I’ll see you at Costco in Shoreline.

Hi Jenny, thanks for all the laughs. I don’t remember how I found your site and your twitter account, but I’m glad I did! I also love to spread the word – your posts make me smile and laugh and I always like to share a good smile and laugh. Makes for a better world, yes? So I guess you’re saving the world – good job! Keep it up! Thanks again.

I loved the book! I have passed it on to my mom, sisters, and best friend. My husband will eventually be reading it as well! I could probably get him to read it faster if I had the audio version😉 Then when he is done I can listen to it whenever I need a laugh!

I want to be in your drawing. But I’m not very lucky, so I probably won’t get picked. My 7-year-old daughter, on the other hand, is the luckiest kid in the world who is not made out of four-leaf clovers or rabbits’ feet. Ooh. A kid made out of rabbits’ feet sounds scary. If I let her make a comment maybe I’ll win. I mean SHE’ll win. that’s what I meant. Totally.

I read the Kindle version of “Let’s Pretend This Never Happened” and laughed so hard while reading in bed that my husband said it was like sleeping in a seedy motel bed with Magic Fingers. I’d love an autographed copy of the book, if only to better see the photos of creepily adorable long-deceased taxidermified animals.

I’m pretty poor right now so I’m trying to borrow your book from the library….I’m 42nd in line. Do you know how many weeks it’s gonna take for me to finally get to read it? Like two billion!! If I get chosen I’ll read it then donate it to the library so others can finally enjoy it without living there whole life on the library’s wait list!!

Wow, that would certainly make days of uncontrollable giggles on the London Undergroud which resulted in people backing away with a look of fear in their eyes as well as the need to change my underwear on arrival at work as, during said giggle fits, a little bit of wee had come out…totally worth it!!!!!

Whether or not you could have done this without us is moot, since you have lived this awesome life. You inspire me, you make me laugh, you make me strive to be a better woman struggling with depression and anxiety. You are a true friend to a bazillion people, even when you’re hiding in the bathroom. Thank you Jenny, for all you do.

As a school librarian, I feel a bit guilty if I am reading materials other than books for kids or educational stuff. There is always too much new literature coming down the pipeline, and I have to try and stay on top of it. When I am not reading about teen vampires, zombies, and dystopias, I read your blogs. I would love to get your book so that A) I can recommend it to teachers, moms, and other people as twisted as I am B) I have an excuse to break away from teen vampires, zombies, and dystopias. I mean, it’s a gift, right? I can’t just NOT read it if it is a gift?🙂

Congrats on the success you’re experiencing. You’ve made so many of us laugh, feel less alone in the world, and look at life with new perspective. You’re the best! (and so is Viktor!)

Any chance that you can come do a book tour in England? You could collect a dubious taxidermy Loch Ness Monster, take a ride in the TARDIS and visit a museum for brains! We have so much to offer!!! Plus, some very swish bathrooms for reatreating to, should the need arise.
Yours in hope (or London, whatever),
Jen.

I am so excited that you’re finally making it to Arizona! I’m making a special trip down to Phoenix for this, and I hate Phoenix. As in, hate it so much I don’t visit family down there very much. This is how awesome you are.

Congratulations on your success! A hard copy would be so wonderful…I keep telling my roommate (who, I think, has fallen in love with you) that he needs to read your book, but I had downloaded it because I was too impatient to wait until I could get to the bookstore. He is a slow reader and I do not want to be without my phone (which has my Kindle app) for that long.

Ah well…if I’m not chosen to win, I will probably just buy a hard copy anyway. I tell too many people about it not to have a copy on hand for loaning to them.

I recently e-mailed you to tell you that I am in Seattle and on your book tour list…I just didn’t know if I would be alive long enough to make it that far. Your fairy godmother Mary was sweet enough to reply to my e-mail. I’m trying really hard to make it to August, if only to meet you. I can check off one more day now.

This is like Christmas in July! I would love the audio copy – the book was great!! With my new audio copy I can listen to it on my long commute to work – and laugh until I cry every morning… well maybe I shouldn’t cry because that could cause an accident.. but the audio book would make me a super happy gal! I can’t wait for you in Seattle!

You happen to be on the best-seller list STILL because you are spectacularly witty and I’m not just saying that to suck up and win, but because I truly enjoyed your book.
OK – and just a little to suck up if it will swing the odds in my favor…cuz I would so love to hear the audio version.

I was reading your book in bed. My husband was trying to sleep, and I kept laughing (potato chip on the floor, being kicked in the face.) I said to him, “Sorry, I guess I shouldn’t read this at night.” He said, “Yes, you know how I hate your joy.” True love. : )

Oooooh, I desperately want an autographed American version. Pick me… But, if you don’t I will probably order one from Changing Hands. So, I guess there is very little incentive for you to pick me. Except that it would make a much better story if I won it than if I ordered it from Arizona. And really, it’s all about having a story to tell, right?

I missed you in South Florida because I got sick with the plague or something horrible and the Walgreen’s pharmacist kept telling me I just had a cold, but isn’t that how the plague started? A cold between rodents?

Anyway, I won’t be able to make it to any stops on your book tour because my cape is in the shop.

I am looking foward to seeing you in Seattle! My husband is from Texas, and he loves it here. Perhaps you might consider moving up here someday. As fas as I know we have no scorpions or poisonous snakes. And it’s the PNW – we embrace unique and therefore you.

I hope you next book comes together in less than 10 years! Looking foward to reading it.

Never thank a person for having good taste… see you in Seattle….and I am passing up Lauren Jackson Bobblehead night for you and the Seattle Storm and….WAIT A JENNY LAWSON BOBBLEHEAD…SOMEONE GET ON THAT…

Not only are you not coming to the Chicagoland area, but I haven’t managed to arrange my annual trip to Ontario so I can’t see you there, either.😦 (I’m still searching for the perfect “Beyonce” with which to irritate my husband… I know she’s out there… somewhere.)

I not only loved the book, but my 18 year old daughter did and my 14 year old son keeps reading pieces out loud to me. That is why you are still on the bestseller list – you are funny and appeal to everyone!

I live a mere three and a half hours from Toronto, yet I cannot make the pilgrimige. AUGH! You finally come to Canada and I’m thwarted by Toronto. If only you’d come to Ottawa…. Next tour, hopefully. As a mildly disgruntled and thwarted Canadian, I would be mollified by an audio version, as I already have the hard cover.

one of my best friends told me about your blog and book just this morning. After checking out your blog, belly laughing, and identifying with your anxiety and bathroom retreats i cant wait to read your book!!

A signed copy of your book would make me happier than it’s probably legal to be in the state of Arizona. Also, it would give me something to show my cat, Barkley, because he is a super-fan of your cat, Posey, and is also my own personal psychopath on the other side of the bathroom door. Shortly after reading your book, I found myself in a similar situation caused not by laxative but by an unfortunate Mexican food episode that I’ve probably already said too much about. Anyway, I, too, was alone in my house when the bathroom door handle started jiggling. “Someone’s in here!!”, I heard myself yelling. Then the absurdity of the situation struck me and I started laughing but then Barkley succeeded in opening the door which flew open because he was standing against it and so then I started screaming.

Anyway, in conclusion, a signed copy of your book would make for two very ecstatic Jenny Lawson & Posey super-fans in my house and would also become a cherished family heirloom as we don’t have many nice things.

Im so happy for you. And proud if I can say that without sounding condescending. And also a little disturbed because I read your book and Fifty Shades at the same time and I had some very awkward dreams about you and victor….and wolf blitzer.

Alas, you’re not comin far enough east for me to even dream of meeting you! Plus silly things like kids, work, and responsibility keep me from packing a bag and going to any of your signings. Le sigh… But the work and you are awesome!!

ok, I’m usually a silent follower, and I haven’t won anything since winning a Tandy TRS80 in the grade four bike rodeo (yeah, if that doesn’t age me….), but hey, can’t turn down a chance at a free (and much coveted) book! (and since my funds are very tight these days, I have’t been able to move your book from my amazon wish list to my shopping cart just yet!). Congrats on all your success!!

YAY for the giveaway since my library has 4 copies for 105 holds and hubby lost his job a few weeks ago so any money we have has gone to stupid stuff like mortgage and food . . . and I thought about shoplifting (hey you said I could) but I just didn’t have the nerve/balls/fast shoes to do it.

Ooh, I told a friend about your book last night – but I won’t let her borrow my copy, because the last book I gave her was just returned. After five years. BUT if I win an autographed British copy, then she can totally have my boring ol’ American copy.

I would love the audio to share with my mother. She’s blind. I’m deaf and have the hard copy. We find this sort of amusing when we go out together in public. The deaf leading the blind. Until we communicate then it usually ends up reversed.

I borrowed your book from my friend who *is* going to see you in Toronto, and need to give it back to her. She, meanwhile, is in the throes of creative misery as she tries to think of things to give you that will make you laugh so hard you have to lie down.

I am very disappointed that you didn’t come anywhere close to the nation’s capital. Really, most of the politicians are imported, and the natives aren’t like that at all. I promise. (And you know how we feel about promises around here!)

You can make it up to me with a book. Because I don’t want any taxidermied animals. And I don’t look good in a dress. And I don’t have enough hair left for those curlers.

I wish I could come up with something wild and witty to say to ensure I was one of the chosen ones, but I’m sorry…that’s why I read you, to avoid the work of trying to be wild and witty! (Please, STOP trying to make me do your job for you! Geeze!)
So I’m just gonna jump up and down in my computer chair, waving my hand wildly in the air while screaming, “Me! Me! Me! Oh oh oh, pick ME!!!!!” (yeah, right up until all the jumping causes a baldder incident, which will TOTALLY be on YOUR head! Thanks a lot…)

Jenny Lawson,
Where do I begin? Thank you for your book. It makes me feel a little more sane (which is totally fucking dangerous!). Knowing that Victor has made it through all this gives me great hope for my husband. But what I am really trying to say is that I enjoyed your book so much because we have so many similarities. Well, in part. Except that your anxieties lead you to the bathroom, hanging out like the girl that is too cool for the party while I end up running to the bathroom trying to beat the shit storm my anxieties bring on and then I have people all panicked that they are going to get food poisoning and my husband has to explain not to worry, I do this all the time. Okay, maybe it doesn’t happen quite like that but if we had friends that invited us over it would. That’s why my bathroom is the safest place to be. Desperately trying to hide away from my fears of the world, or from my children and husband. And I am tired of retreading the same damn magazine that is three years old now so now you see why it is so important to have your book. As my safe room supply. And now I find myself wondering if I really want to post this rant for the world to see. Yes! Yes I do! Because if Jenny Lawson can do it, so can I! And if that ends up on a shirt, I want one of those too. Signed, “you are one badass bitch- in a good way” because that’s how you make me feel, Jenny Lawson. And I am grateful. The end. I think. (a sigh of relief that the rambling can now end) (and the obsessive checking of the inbox can begin) (someone stop me please!!!) okay, here is the real end. .

Just finished reading your book~ it was hysterical. My sides hurt from laughing! I now use the phrase “Dear Victor” as a warning to my husband! (I read him the post it note chapter) I would LOVE to win an audio version, then I could hear your voice!

I’m so happy for you, but I’m also totally unsurprised at your bestselling awesomeness. You’re a fabulous writer with a unique perspective, and you’ve written your butt off (erm…likely not literally). I hope your second proposal goes through: can’t wait to read more!

Well. That was the extent of my sappy good will for the week. I’m sure Husband will roll his eyes at you now, since I’ve spent his quota on you. Hahahaha.

I don’t generally enter blog giveaways because they’re usually giving out something I will never enjoy. But having a signed copy of your book is, like, shrine-worthy. In fact, if I win a signed copy, I will erect a shrine in my house for said book and post pictures of it on my blog for you. That’s TOTALLY free advertising, which is way better than advertising you pay for. See? Win/win for both of us.

Also, my blog has pictures of carrots with penises, so you’ll fit right in.

Also, I’ll donate the copy of your book that I already have to the families needy children*.

(No, not UNDERPRIVILEGED children, NEEDY children. The type that whine all the time and are never happy? Their parents need some escapism. They also should know how to traumatize their children by using dead squirrel puppets and such. Think about it: We’ll be saving families together.)

Because of you, I almost purchased a five-foot tall rooster akin to the famed Beyonce while driving through Mississippi earlier this month. It would’ve looked great on my boyfriend’s front porch next to wicker one-foot tall rooster he purchased to shut me up. Thanks for that.

I thought about driving the 10+ hours to get to Portland to get a signed book, but my sciatic nerve is acting up and I dont think a drive that long would be good for it. So I’ll settle for winning a copy of the signed book here.🙂

And congrats on all your success! The Beyonce story alone, make the book worth it’s full price, so thank you for my own little personal copy of that!

Not only have both my husband and I read your book, but so have all of my colleagues at work. A couple of weeks ago, my admin walked in with a tiny squirrel stuffie, smashed into a cracker box and yelled, “Guess who I am!” The whole cubicle area laughed so hard, that our ED had to come over and tell us to quiet down.🙂

Wish I could catch you in Toronto, but I’m in Ottawa and I unfortunately can’t slip away for the 5+ hrs it takes to drive up there. Have a fantastic end of tour – you earned it!

Have fun, stay safe and don’t let the Canadians convert you. If you’re anywhere near these stops for Jenny’s tour — stop what you’re doing and GO. You’ll never regret it, and you only live once! (Even if you choose to pretend it didn’t happen at the end.)

I’m really sad because I was lamenting for months about the fact that you weren’t bringing your book tour to Toronto, and now that you are, I’m not going to be able to go. I am playing Henry Higgins in a production of Pygmalion, and I have rehearsal that night. I suppose I could call in sick, but that would totally screw everyone else in the cast because Higgins is in almost every scene. So, I’m choosing to do the right thing, but have to miss the chance to meet you as a result. Major bummer. Oh well–I’ll make sure to keep my calendar free for when the tour for your 2nd book comes to town.

Congrats on all your success, Jenny. Thanks for all you’ve shared with us.

I would DIE to win a copy! Although that would make it a bit difficult to read if I won… hmm….

But seriously I do really really want a copy but haven’t been able to buy one since finances have been really tight here. But I love you so much and I would just about die laughing as I always do reading your blog. My husband doesn’t get it, but I don’t care. He already knows he married the crazy, he’s stuck now!

You make me laugh until I do this really unattractive wheeze/snort, and that’s something I value immensely. Congratulations on all of your success with your book, I hope it stays a bestseller for a long time to come!

Oooh!
Pick me, pretty please.
I like free.
And your blog makes me laugh, so
I imagine your American book would
make me laugh, too.
Thank you.
Also making me laugh: the time and effort I am putting into this comment, because
1. it will never be noticed, tossed in with the hundreds of other comments
2. I should be doing laundry, but I am not, because I am *so busy* on the computer, like it’s my job, which it isn’t, because I can’t seem to make blogging pay.
Thank you, again. This has been a welcome break from laundry.

I really want a signed book, so that I can gloat continuously that I have one and none of my friends do. Please help me make my friends jealous! And I’m gonna try to get off work so I can come to your signing in Minneapolis!

The first thing I did after I read your book was check out a book from my library on how to write creative non-fiction. Because you’re GODDAMNED INSPIRING.

I’ve also picked up some of your shout-y capitalization habits.

While reading your book, I laughed like a crazy person many times. I realized that my social anxiety doesn’t mean that I can’t have a voice. And I was encouraged to go learn something new. Point being, you’ve already given me a gift, so this isn’t even a ploy for a signed copy – it’s just to say thank you.

Bought this book and loved it! Took my children to the water park, but found it difficult to put the book down long enough to enjoy many of the rides (No judgement here people…my children are older and they don’t want their mother, especially their mother in a bathing suit, following them around). So I just sat in my chair, obnoxiously laughing out loud, while the lady next to me (reading non-fiction) gave me the stink eye!

I tried to convince my husband we needed a giant metal chicken for the yard the other day. He wouldn’t go for it. Maybe if I had told him I was going to name it Beyonce he’d be ok with it? I don’t know. I hadn’t come up with a name yet, though. Next time, I’m not asking, I’m just going to surprise him with such things.

I want the audio version of your books so much! I’d already purchased the hardcover when I found the YouTube video of you reading the first chapter and now I MUST hear the rest. And I loaned your book to my sister, so I’m never getting that copy back.

As a kid, and later as a teacher, the Junie B. Jones book were my all-time favorite. I love that kid! And I for real think you are the grownup version of Junie B. Which is honestly the highest compliment I know to give anyone. Loved listening to your book and now occasionally find myself narrating my life in my head using your voice. You are one of the bravest, funniest women I know. thank you for your blog, and your book.
Love,
A Junie B. and Bloggess fan.

I’m not the slightest bit surprised it’s on the best seller list!! It the most refreshing book! Filled with hilarious stories and it reads like you’re sitting right here telling them. Thanks for sharing, and I know I’M looking forward to book #2!

Your book is the only one that I have ever read and laughed out loud (literally) so much! I would read in bed and start cracking up and my husband was always like, WTH??? Loved it! Can’t wait until your next book!

I loved your book, it made me laugh so much. Only problem was that I didn’t have any ethically taxidermied animals to read it with, so I made do with a stuffed toy Tricerotops called Trevor and Eeyor. So congratulations on the book’s success and thank you for making me feel less anxious about my own anxieties/neurosis. My next goal is to get a version of the audiobook in the UK to continue the joy!!

When my boyfriend arrived home(sweden) from a 3 week business trip in canada i dragged him straight to bed and read the Ritz cracker squirrel puppet chapter to him out loud. He couldnt breath by the time i was done and now follows your blog religously. That and i vote for Scott again.

ooooh. Pick me. Pick me.
PS – I use the line “And that’s when I realized I no longer had the Turkey Baster.” as a short cut explanation for every scarring and embarrassing moment of my life. It’s saved me a lot of time, since I have those moments far more frequently than I should.

I was going to try and say something witty, but really I’m just very grateful you wrote a book about owning your personality despite (or perhaps in spite) of all the obstacles to being genuine.
❤ small talk suicides.

I too would love to win a hard copy. I bought the kindle version AND a hard copy but I gave it to my girlfriend who I believe could really benefit from your experience AND humor. A signed replacement would be A-MAZ-ING!

I am sadface because you came to North Carolina, but NOT to Raleigh, so while you were signing books for my sociology professor two and a half hours away, I was weeping disconsolately into a stuffed muskrat. Is that how you want to see taxidermied rodents treated, Jenny? Is it? As snot rags?

A friend suggested I read your blog…simply to add a little more hysteria to my day. Now I am hooked! If only I could get my husband to quit giving me the “you really are crazy and I should have listened to my mother” look when I read a post to him. Keep up the great work!

My mom told me about your book and blog and I loved every second of it! And now, as a bookseller at Barnes & Noble in Tennessee, I can’t help gushing about it to all the customers and fellow booksellers!! Lots of your books are flying out the door here!!

I like free stuff! Since you aren’t doing a book signing in Kerrville, sadly I can’t attend the final leg. Your book is literally my life except instead of taxidermist, my dad is in a cult. See, so similar, I know, right?

Oh. my. lanta! I think that I need a signed copy. I have the kindle version but it’s not like having the real deal. I would also be cool with an audio CD, mainly so I could irritate the hell out of my husband. He doesn’t think that taxidermy animal collections are as cool as I do. Clearly, he’s has no sense of humor.

Ooo! I would love a copy of the book or the audio version. I bought it when it came out and I got up to the chapter about the cow-vagina before I lent/gave my copy to a friend who found out she had cancer and needed something to cheer her up during her surgery and treatments. (And she totally sympathized about the whole-gynocologist at Starbucks run-in- because she was having to get naked in front of so many doctors back in the spring time. HA!)

I just had to tell you how much I am just enjoying this book. You tell a great tale in your own voice and even with anxiety dosorder and depression, you still find positive moments and humor in each situation. I truly believe its powers like these that help us get through the world as we know it today. Believe or not, I think you’re a great role model and a great humorist. Thank you for such a womderful and honest memoir! Best of luck in the future!

I read your book on the plane, coming back from taking 50 elementary kids from Houston to Minneapolis. We passed the book around and took turns reading out loud…when the reader was laughing to hard to breathe properly, the book got passed to the next person. You are an inspiration and a modern day wonder of the world!

Live on an island with a medically fragile child who can only be left with her nurse and the closest you came to me was Boston which would have been fine (only 1 1/2 hr ferry ride then 3 1/2 hour car ride) if my oldest was not getting ready to graduate high school right then! *sob*sob*sob* So, I would LOVE an autographed copy of you audiobook. I already have it on my Nook, my itunes and the hardcover with my treasured autographed book plate lovingly stuck inside. But a girl can never get enough Bloggess on her life.😉

Absolutely loved the book and am slowly, but surely exposing more people to your blog so that I can tell people things like, “Knock-knock, mother******” and have them get the joke. Thanks for being whimsical and creative and for often brutally honest in your struggles. You bring joy, laughter, and an invitation to recognize the beauty all around us.

I keep entering and hoping to win an audio copy, but thus far the stars have not aligned. I just reread the last two chapters of your book last night for fun, while I was sitting in bed wide awake instead of sleeping. I was SO excited to see that you were coming to the Pacific NW, but unfortunately, you come to Portland on a weekday and it is a 3 hour drive from where I live and I work from 8-6 M-F. Sigh. I want to be there sooooo bad. I hope the tour goes well for you! If you happen to ever find yourself in Bend, Oregon…let me know!!
P.S. I think you’ll love Portland. They pride themselves on being ‘weird.’ It makes me happy.

Jenny – I loved reading your book and share your blog with everyone. Thank you for sharing your “neuroses” with the rest of us…we’re all in this crazy world together. Congrats on staying on the bestseller list!

Congrats on the tour, I have not been able to see you, which makes me sad. However, on a better note, I’ve been trolling thrift stores trying to find ethically killed/stuffed animals.
Thanks for giving me a new hobby.

I so wish you were coming to Cleveland, OH! I would love to meet you and talk wackiness with you! I love your posts and love your book and am so happy I stumbled across your site! You make so many people feel hopeful. And that’s awesomeness.

I am savoring it – any time I let my mental health get to me, or I have a rough day, or my husband just fails to appreciate my uniqueness, I boot up the nook and read a little while. I don’t want to tear through it – I rather creepily use it as my virtual Jenny friend. I’d love a hard copy to share!

I heart your book and blog!!! The Double Unicorn Success Club is the only club I having willing joined in my adult life and I feel like a successful productive member seeing how I am constantly spamming my friends with pictures of Wil Wheaton. I deserve a signed book🙂 Don’t you think…

I posted this on your Facebook Page but I want to post it here as well.

My daughter was born with Amniotic Band Syndrome and is missing her left arm from the elbow down. Some wonderful ladies at my Sister-In-Laws Church have started fundraising to buy her a prosthetic arm. Would you share the link to her Facebook Page to help get the word out? She’s a beautiful little girl but she just wants to look a little more like other girls. She doesn’t want to be stared at all the time anymore. She just wants to feel like a regular kid. It reminds me so much of your Traveling Red Dress.

Since you didn’t come to Nebraska on your book tour (not that I blame you), I feel you owe me a really cool Brittish version of your book. All will be forgiven and peace will be restored blah blah blah. You’re awesome btdubs.

I live about 12 miles from Changing Hands and plan to be there when you visit. I’ll be the obsessive, stalker-like guy hanging out in the back . . . I will bring my copy for an autograph, but will gladly accept another to give away to some deserving soul. And since I’m local, I’ll save you (well, someone) the trouble of shipping the book.

I’ve been on the waiting list for your book at the library forever, but would be so thrilled to win any version of it (American preferred, but any would be awesome!).
Congrats on all of your success with the book!🙂

I love your posts! I’m still waiting to get my hands on your book so this would be the perfect opportunity…..plus this one would be extra special! It would be awesome to have a signed copy. I’m keeping my fingers and toes crossed for this one🙂

My kindle version has kept me company and has been well abused. Wishing you had gotten closer to Columbus Ohio.. but I will suffer through!! I would love your autograph.. so I can add to my ” who are these ppl” autographs (You would be the first famous one)

Just when I thought all hope was lost you added Arizona to your book tour. I am feeling lucky so put me in the running for a free book. I have it on my Nook already and love, love, love! See you in Tempe!

Because you wear curlers with class, gift your husband with temporary exotic pets, and are always a shining light, I promise to read portions of your book to my undergraduate students each week if I can find appropriate passages. They need your wisdom!

WantWantWantWantWantWantWantWantWantWantWant! (It goes to 11.) And congratulations on everything you’ve achieved! I was not able to make your one local tour stop earlier due to work, but would love something autographed by a person who’s made me actually LOL more than anyone else I can think of since discovering your blog thanks to Wil!

I have never laughed so much reading a book until I read your’s. I’ve been passing it around to everyone at work. Thank you for this book! I will soon be buying one of your beyonce’s to put in my new house. 🙂

Thank you for showing “crazy” is okay, thankyouverymuch! Our book club read your book as last month’s selection and thought it was the perfect fun summer read. We also think Victor is a saint, made up, or in denial. Could go any of those ways, really… But, since my folks are moving into the Hill Country area now, if I ever hope to have an accidental celebrity run-in, I’ll need to frequent the odd antique shops that are everywhere, particularly if they sell dead stuffed things.

Thanks for the gift of you and happy writing #2! (The book, that is, not… well… you know!!)

Greetings! Am currently working inside of a large tent that seats over 2,000 people with a show that has 49 stallions and numerous very talented acrobats…would adore to see you in in person at some point…
your stories are such great comic relief..thank you!

I’d just die of happiness if I had an autographed British version of your book. Then come back as a zombie because I have to read it. But if I die of happiness I’d be a happy zombie! So it’s all pretty great in the end! And I’d read it every single day since it’s that kind of amazing.

I would LOVE your audio book! My husband got me the actual book for my birthday, and I devoured it quickly. I love reading your creations! You are just so smart, funny, and REAL, and I wish I knew you in real life so we could be friends. Brava on all you have accomplished!🙂

You make me happy every time I read one of your blog entries or reread your book. Yes, I would certainly love to win a copy, so I’d be sure to not freak out when they didn’t return my other copy. I wish you safe travels and continued success! You certainly deserve it!🙂

The audio version would be so awesome because I can only read so much at a time. I start laughing so hard that I can’t see from the tears of laughter and have to stop. Although the British cover would be super cool to have too.

So sorry you won’t be coming to the Kansas City area – but I do rave about your book any chance I get. Stay strong, and thank you for the Red Dress phenomena, I just bought a red dress I am offering for others to wear.

When you came through the Washington DC area, I was in the middle of projects for school and was not able to attend any of your book signings. I cried for days and days. My sister was able to see you in North Carolina and she holds that over my head when ever she gets the chance. I would love to a signed British Version to hold over HER head … or a signed American version. Which ever one you could spare for a poor starving student.

I would LOVE a copy of the British version (being Canadian, and all). I’d try to be all witty and whatnot, but I’m the 560th (or thereabouts) comment, and you’ve probaby stopped reading them at this point, so: congratulations on your book. Well deserved success.

I would LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE a hard copy, have the Kindle version! The only thing I would like better would be part-shares in Hunter S. Thomcat – preferably the part-share that involves no hairballs, but beggars can’t be choosers.

This tour must be so exciting/nerve-wracking! I went to see you in Brookline and the room was so crowded I couldn’t get in! (My sister’s fault, not mine, that we weren’t very early… but we weren’t at all late, either!)

I love your blog and cannot wait to read your book – it is on my list. I have a sister that has mental health issues, and reading your posts helps me deal with her day to day. Thank you so much! I’m sure the book will help wonders!

A couple of my friends have read your book and laughed the entire time. I’m getting married at the end of August and would love to read over my honeymoon… either with a copy from you or I’ll go pick one up myself. Congrats on the success of your book!

From one Texan to another… You should totally send me a copy of your book. When I first found your blog, I was reading through some posts, laughing SO HARD! My husband was all, wtf, woman? So I just told him he needed to read it too. He laughed, but I think still just thought I was nuts. Then again, probably pretty accurate.

I’m so excited to see you in San Diego I keep capslocking about it to my boss.
Who is now deathly frightened that she is going to come into work and have her office be filled with taxidermied chinchillas.

Oh my, you poor thing. Having to read through 600 + comments to give away the books! I want to buy one now, just to help ease the pain. One question….is the British version written in English and the American version written in American? English and American seem to be two totally different languages these days.

Wish I had made it to see you when you were in Maryland…damn anxiety. I attempted to talk my boyfriend into driving me to Canada and then forcing me into the signing with xanax…no luck. He also won’t buy me a pony though so what should I expect. At least I have my signed bookplate!🙂

I already have your book, but would love a signed copy. You can make it out to, “Wonderbutt’s Mom, the illustrious Mrs. Cap’n Firepants, collector of killer mattresses, maladroit medics, and fashion faux pas.”

A recent fan – someone sent me the link to your site after I attempted to convince my husband that we needed a 12 foot metal chicken in our yard. Alas, I could not fit it in our car so we have no Beyoncé II for our neighbors to admire. Sigh.

I’d love a hard copy, read it on my Kindle – it was fabulous, except I couldn’t see the pictures very well, and I’m sure they were hilarious! If I win, I’ll get it double autographed when I see you in Denver! YAY

Thank you for writing it. Please write another! I laughed so much. Also after I finished it I messaged you on twitter to let you know how much it meant to not feel like I was the only crazy person who had to go hide in the bathroom and you responded, it was really cool of you to do that. So thanks again!

I’d love an autographed hard copy. Listening to the audiobook now. Had to have it because YOU did the voice over. The DH & I wanna see the pictures. Even if I don’t win, could I get a hard copy & mail to you (w/postage for the return) for an autograph? Is that a rude thing to ask?

I started following you back when you wrote about meeting Neil Gaiman at w00tstock! I’ve been a follower and fan of Gaiman’s for decades. And I am a fan of w00tstock (Paul and Storm, Adam Savage, Wil Wheaton and most of the acts they have booked). I’m now a fan and follower of yours.

There is a force in the universe, I like to call, “The Confluence of Awesome.” It’s like the six degrees of separation in reverse. Or maybe it’s like “The Force,” in Star Wars. This theory states that All the people you think are Awesome eventually cross paths, or you will feel a profound need to make that happen and bring them together. It’s the some force that makes people set up their friends on blind dates. So it’s not always a force for good.

This is my roundabout way of saying that I think you are awesome. And I hope you get a chance to meet Laurie Anderson, Molly Lewis, Marian Call, Jules Sherred, Maria Bamford, Regina Spektor, Jackie Kashian, Mary Jo Pehl, Jade Gordon and the Fabulous Lorraine Garland soon. My guess is several of these women have crossed your path already. All are Awesome too. And to prove my theory right, whatever force governs the “Confluence of Awesome” should have you crossing paths with them sometime soon.

Did you hear about Wil Wheaton’s birthday party? THAT was a manifestation of “The Confluence.” One you know about “The Confluence of Awesome,” you won’t be able to stop recognizing when it happens.

I’ve never commented before, but I’ve spent many (re: all) hours at work combing through your archives after reading your book. It was a much needed break in my own storm of depression. When my bipolar lows start to dip I now have a much needed outlet. Thank you for putting all of your craziness together. I’ve read it twice now and peed a little from laughing more times than I can count.

You are an inspiration in a world where the world seems to get worse every day. Bringing joy to people is the only way I know how to offset the depression that threatens to creep back in every so often and obviously that doesn’t always work. I’m a senior in college near Austin and I have no clue what I’m going to do with my life. All I want is to inspire others and make the world a bit better. You’re one of my role models and my life has been forever changed for the better because of you, your blog, your cats, and your various purchases (I even got a metal lawn peacock in honor of Beyonce; his name is Penelope).

Have a beautiful day, I’m terribly sad to not have been able to make it to the Austin book signing but I had class and could not miss it under penalty of failing…I hope you’ll be back around soon.

Jenny, I’d tell ya I love ya anyway, but I’d love a copy of the audio book! Having heard you read portions of it (twice now!), I can only imagine how many boxes of kleenex I’d need to wipe away the screaming tears of laughter. :p

SO cool – I gave your book to a friend recovering from surgery. Luckily (for her) she waited to read it until she was pretty well recovered, ’cause some stitches surely would have exploded had she embarked on the journey earlier! Then she called her daughter over and they both fell off their chairs laughing….she said she hadn’t laughed like that in years. THAT is what it’s all about!

I really want to read your book! Just yesterday I found a taxidermist’s shop on Main Street in a nearby town (to me, not to you, although maybe you have one close by?) I was looking at a white lynx and a big stag with a t-pin in his lip and thinking of you.
Cheers,
DJL

I don’t NEED an autographed copy, but we all know there is a huge chasm between NEED and WANT. That said, I would put you on the same shelf as Kenneth Branagh and John Houseman, Lorrie Moore and John Fowles. You would be in very good company.

I’d love to listen to you read, it was an awesome read on an airplane. and by awesome I mean I looked like a crazy person as I laughed loudly. and by looked like a crazy person I mean it let people know how I normally am

I do so wish that I lived near any of the tour cities! I’d love the audio cd. I’ve already read the book but fantasize about laughing like a mad person while working out at the gym while others look on bewildered.

My boyfriend and I are both really interested in reading your book, but we haven’t gotten a chance to buy a copy yet. Our first anniversary is coming up in just under a month, and I think, “what better gift could I get him than a signed copy of this book?!”

I would LOVE a copy of the audio book! I am waiting very patiently until my next month’s paycheck so I am allowed more books & can buy yours for my nook.

You are one of the best bloggers/writers out there, and I look forward to reading along as you continue on this path. I get so excited when my RSS feed notifies me you have a new post on your site! The support you have is all because of the kind, open, and generous person you are. You encourage us all to be a little more vulnerable so that we can be open to just a bit more happiness. It’s nothing to sniff at.

I still haven’t gotten your book, so i am not one of the people you should thank, but I’m going to thank you. You are such an inspiration to be awesome and be yourself and just be. I mean life handed you shitty thing and after shitty thing and you took the knocks and said “knock knock mother fucker”. You’re my hero. You have no idea. I wish you would come to philly so i could hide in the back and cry and then run away without a signature but know in my heart i was there to see you. You are awesome, so thanks. Crying at work again – you owe me the book😉

So excited you are coming to Portland!
So sad we will not be in town when you are coming to Portland….

My first exposure to you was my wife reading to me about the monkey hands. A shirt while later, I got to read your blog post about the travelling red dress. I have had lots of mini battles with depressing, confidence, body image. Your blog gives me joy, hope, comraderie. Thank you.

Would love an opportunity to win a book to give to my wife. Barring that, I need to contact Arizona after the mortgage is paid…

I’d love a physical copy of your book! It’s on my list of things to reward myself with once I finish writing this loooong paper, but that’s very far away and luck doesn’t count, right? I was trying to look up a fitting saying but I have no idea what horses or their shoes have to do with it.

I would absolutly love an american copy of your book. The ladies at work and I think you are hilarious. and actually we have a framed picture of your metal chicken hanging in our office. Wish I could have made one of your book signings. Stay awesomely different!

I missed your Maryland visits because it’s illegal to leave preschoolers home alone. It I win a copy of your book it will be so much easier to prove to my book club that we need another non-fiction selection. Pick me, pick me!

I would love to win a copy of the book, simply because I could then give my copy away to someone else and bring your words to someone who doesn’t know them. I found your book inspiring, funny, and real. I wish I could meet you in person, I do, but you haven’t come close enough to my hometown. Maybe one day! Be safe on your journey!

Last week I had a terrible spiral into depression… your blog got me through. Depression Lies. I hadn’t heard that until you, and that was what i clung to when i started to think the world would be better off without me.

Would love copy of the British edition, especially since my book money jar is empty and I am chewing my nails to get some funds to buy your book… and your love of taxidermy reminds me of the “Squirrel people” from Christopher Moore’s Dirty Job, which gives you special kudo points in my heart…

You should drop by Halifax while you’re visiting Toronto. They’re really close together. Honest! Okay, it’s a 20 hour drive. Very scenic, though. Love your blog and would love to have a copy of the book. Thanks!

I read your book on holiday in Tenerife & it made my holiday! I live in Scotland & so had a bit of trouble with the heat as not used to it at all. Would love an Audio version of the book, pretty please x

the best part about your book was how perturbed my husband was that i kept randomly laughing out loud while reading it. if you gave me a signed copy, i would put you on the shelf next to my signed Isabel Allende books. and then i’d let someone borrow my unsigned copy, which would dramatically increase happiness in the world.

I love you book to the point of sharing my copy with my HR lead. We have spent many lunch breaks giggling at all the HR moments we have shared. I would love to win another copy so I can spread the shenanigans.

Just finished reading the book. I spent the last few nights laughing, crying and reading outloud to anyone who was in the room … or the universe if I was alone in the room. A signed copy would mean I have your exceptionally valuable autograph, and will be able to share the one I paid for with friends and relatives (who didn’t hear my personal audio version because they were asleep … or in another town)!

Unfortunately you are not coming close enough on your tour for me to get to meet you. But know that I am doing me part to keep you on that bestseller list. So far I have bought 5 copies for friends and family. I am thinking of starting to hand them out to depressed strangers on the street.
Thanks for making us laugh and thus making us sane(r)!

Best vacation book I’ve ever bought… read it during a week in Amsterdam, and I was always just drunk/hungover enough while reading to be moved to tears (laughing and sad) by your stories. While reading at bedtime one night, your acupuncture story and your vulture/digging up the dog story had me wheezing with silent shrieks of hilarity, trying not to disturb my poor friend in the bed next to me. Solid gold. I’ve recommended it to about a dozen people already. Would love a signed copy!

I would LOVE the British version autographed is possible. And you shouldn’t be surprised it’s a best seller – you are so amazingly talented and funny. I have the e-version of this book but can’t wait to get my hands on an autographed copy. 🙂 Thanks for sharing your life and laughter with us.

I adored the book and you success is well deserved. I have even read edited parts of it and the blog to my 9 and 11 year old children and they roll on the floor laughing. It is comforting for them to know that they are in Double Unicorn Success Club even when they are feeling stabby. Sadly our weird conversations about these things in grocery stores tend to scare the very old and the very young. Also could you ask Copernicus to stop crank calling my son — its making him feel stabby.

DONT YOU DARE send me a signed copy of your book! I’d rather get it in person when I can thank you for inspiring me to write. I’ve always wanted to write but never committed to the first step. (You know, actually putting words down and then coming back continuously to add more words.). I will give you a signed copy of my first book in a few years though. Deal?

JENNY YOU ROCK!!!!! I have your book, and would love another one, but you MUST KNOW that YOU ROCK!!!! I’m hoping that I get to come to your book signing in Denver, but it’s the 1st day of school for my kids and I have work….blah….blah……FREAKIN BLAH.
Also wanted to let you know that you have inspired me to start writing about my crazy life🙂 So THANK YOU!!!

What the hell am I suppose to put in the “website” box???? It’s highlighted in RED and freakin me out a little bit – should I make-up a website??? Can I just hit “submit”?? Will you get this??? OH MY GOD the question’s…..here I go…..SUBMITTTTTTTT

Your my superwoman. (:
(on a more serious note, I read your super woman blog post after being in the hospital for a week from toxic shock that almost killed me. I told some of my family if they ever had to make funeral arrangements for me, I want something awesome like that.)
Thank You!

good luck on the tour! Toronto better treat you right so that you come to more Canadian cities in the future🙂 I would love a UK version signed. Thank you for sharing your humour and your experiences with us and for making people like me feel less crazy and less alone.

Jenny, your book made me laugh out loud! The only problem was that I couldn’t read what was so funny out loud for my husband to enjoy also as there were little ears listening. Thanks for sharing! Can’t wait for book #2!!

I shall wave to you from across Lake Ontario when you are in Toronto! Well, I’ll face north and we will have to pretend since I’m not really all that close to the shoreline. Its a pretty big lake anyway, not like you can see Rochester from there unless you look really hard and have binoculars and are pretty much way out on the water. It is the thought that counts, though and I WILL wave.🙂 Have fun in Canada, my Pop’s home country!

Depends what your signature really looks like. I wouldn’t want people to find out that copy I have was actually faked by writing with my left hand, with my eyes closed…wait? Can I claim I didn’t know it was fake if I didn’t actually ‘see’ me write it?

I really just wanted to say that I think you are awesomely brillant. You are a very strong woman that puts everything out there, and dares anyone to say anything. If the whole world was more like you, we would live in a much better place. We all have issues and we deal…that’s life. But you are a perfectly picked bouquet for the souls of all of us that frequently visit the “Dark Side”. So thank you so much for being you, and sharing yourself with all of us.

Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease pick me!! I pre-ordered your book in January, patiently waited until April, it arrived from Amazon a day after it came out, I had the sticker with your signature, which I promply, proudly put on the title page (almost as if you’d signed it yourself originally, or so I convinced myself) and was so excited to read it… I took it on the Acela train from Boston to CT when visiting friends, and apparently, I left it on the train in my haste to not miss my stop. 😦 I was so sad that I’ve been stalking the train stations in Boston and DC weekly hoping that the book will turn up… I would be so happy to get another copy, signed for real!!!! Thank you so much!!!

Ps, I’ll still heart you and read even if you dont pick me. But, (i may be biased) I really think you should pick me!

Dear Jenny. I bought your book as a gift for a friend. Mostly because you reminded me of this friend. Both of you are sensitive, kind hearted and witty. I would love my own copy of your book. A signed copy would be an absolute treasure. Thank you.

I’d love a copy of the British edition, as I love your column with the fire of a thousand suns, but my redundancy money is getting a bit low now and I’m having to be careful about what I spend🙂
Thank you for your videos and posts on how you tackle depression. It’s inspiring to see we’re not alone in this, and that you can have your struggles with it and still come through and be amazing.
*hearts*

I’d love a signed copy of your book…because 1. I’d love to read it, but am too lazy to go check it out from the library, and 2. Am kind of cheap, so I don’t really want to buy it just to read it once. I’m going for honestly points here. Also, your blog is a great way I’ve used to connect with the college students I work with. They love Victor especially. Perhaps Victor should sign the book too…

I am so happy for you!! Your book is amazing and it deserves all the success!! Also, I would love to win a signed copy…does the British version have an accent? Cuz that would be awesome!!🙂 Congrats on everything!!

I would love to have the audio cd! I’ve read so many of your posts to my husband and said “she’s just like me!!” Like the Snoopy Sno Cone maker, I wanted one of those SOOOOO much when I was little — never got one. Also, my husband is an electrician and when he was out of town several years ago, a fuse blew. He tried to tell me what to do over the phone; I just lived the next few days with only a partially lit house…

In all honesty I’ve read over half of the book ….and I’m scared to keep reading it because then it’ll be over and I will have no idea what the hell to do with myself, nor will I have such an amazing source of entertainment to get me through those really shitty days. Then again, I could just read it 12, or maybe 43 more times..(and I’m not just saying that so I can get a signed copy, or maybe I am. I’d like 5 copies please and thanks).

I bought your book shortly after it came out, and I’ve read a few chapters. I have laughed, cried, and nearly peed myself. I have also had several people buy your book on my recommendation. However, I feel like I will never finish your book because I have 2 small children (2 and almost 5 months) and I’m in school full time set to graduate in December. I’m hoping to get a job in PR, mostly so I can show guys pictures of their penis-es (penisis? peni?) that they’ve emailed to people. Anyways, I would LOVE to get a CD Audio copy of the book so I can listen to it on my way to and from school. Plus, as I already imagine your voice reading the book in my head, it would be BAD ASS to hear you actually read it!!

You deserve every single bit of this success! Good things come to good people and ours about damn time the universe started to see your awesomeness!

I would love to have a signed copy of your book or the audio book. You could sign a dirty sock and send it to me for all I care! I’d be super excited to have anything that you’ve autographed! You could sign H.S.T and send him to, just sayin… 🙂

At our last book club meeting we discussed Let’s Pretend…
One of our members asked if anyone in our group would like to have you as a friend, which I thought was a great question.
I was the only one who said yes (I’m drawn to eccentric people and I’ve been entranced with you since my first blog read of yours, which happened to be the one about Beyonce).
You had me at “shiv.”
I’d love to be chosen but there are probably better missives than minel

I wish I could have made it to a reading for a signed book.😦 I did think of Beyonce while driving around the South the other week because apparently, giant metal chickens are popular down there…Kinda wish the car would have supported one to bring back North!

I’m a new reader (spent three hours reading your blog last night!). I think you are very talented- so real and relatable. I laughed so much, and I can only imagine how great your book is! I would love a copy.
I’ll be telling all my friends about you…truly great!

I come to your blog a lot when I’m feeling triggered (self-harmer 19 weeks and 3 days since the last time!). I’ll read back posts until I’m feeling better (or laughing so hard that I pee myself a little). It’s a great distraction tool! Keep on rocking and making us out here in internet land smile!

Really wish you could make it over to the UK for a signing. One of the castles in England (think it was Warwick) has a 6ft stuffed brown bear holding a tray like a waiter. I would so have taken you there and most likely helped you try and steal it! I probably still even have a photo of it somewhere….

I would love a signed copy of your book. I live in Denmark, and just revisited USA this Spring after living there three years ago. And I didn’t get to buy it, when I was there. I would prefer the American version, but British would also do nicely🙂

And congratulations with all the success you’ve had with the book. You deserve it!

I never win anything. Well, one time I won a gag gift of a hideous creamer and sugar bowl. Someone stole it from me in the gift giving swap (I was glad, but got something equally as stupid in return). My dear husband, who after 41 years of marriage STILL does not know me, stole the creamer and sugar bowl back, thinking I LIKED it. Sweet, dear, just sweet.🙂

How I wish I could have been/be at one of your book signings. Alaska didn’t make the cut. You deserve all this success and continue to inspire me and remind me I’m not alone. I’m willing to take whatever you sign (books, tshirts, unicorns, etc) to put on the shrine I have to all things awesome. Well….it’s also known as my bookshelf but that’s a story for another time.

I bought the Kindle version of your book last week. Laughed until I cried. I would love to have a hard copy. But in any event, I I just wanted you to know how much I loved it and can’t wait for the next one.

I would love a signed copy, if for no other reason than to be able to stop contributing to my 401K and just sell my copy before retiring comfortably. And I enjoyed this blog, though I was disappointed when I clicked the “Click here for dates” link. Let’s just say I’ll stick with eHarmony for my online match-making. Totally misleading.

My family was never happier for me to finish a book as when I read the last chapter of yours. They were exhausted from trying to figure out just what insanity I was laughing at and are pretty much convinced that you must be my long lost little sister. (don’t tell my real little sister this. she is quite use to being the middle child and will be really pissed off to find her entire life was based on a lie.)

I got your book from the library but I’d love a copy of my own! I’ve been telling anyone and everyone who’ll listen that they need to read your book. (including Jen from Cake Wrecks!) You made me laugh really hard when I didn’t have a lot to laugh about lately. Thank you!

I’ve read the book already, but I think hearing it in your own voice will make it that much funnier. I’m putting my name in your hat to get an audiobook copy.
Keeping my fingers, toes, hair and other unmentionable parts crossed.

“Let’s Pretend …” remains on the best seller list because you wrote an extremely funny book. The stories are well told, engaging, and often scream-out-loud hysterical. Elements of it are quite touching. I have no need for another signed copy of this work. If this comment wins, donate it to someone else. However, if there is a queue to join to buy the NEXT thing you write, please add me to it.

I’m heartbroken that you never got close enough to the Tampa Bay area for me to see you, but a signed book would go a long way toward stitching my blood pump back together. Congrats on your well earned and massive success!