15 Ways To Take Back Your Life From Your Smartphone

“That second dose of soma had raised a quite impenetrable wall between the actual universe and their minds.”—Brave New World

In his novel Brave New World, Aldous Huxley imagines a utopian future upheld by the pursuit of immediate pleasure. Unlike Orwell’s 1984, world peace is not won through fear and repression; peace is the result of the drug “soma.”

Soma is the perfect drug. Soma is a culturally acceptable (and encouraged) escape from reality. Soma makes anything bearable. Soma has “all the advantages of Christianity and alcohol; none of their defects.” It is through the influence of soma (OK, as well as genetic engineering, lifelong conditioning, and the dissolution of the family unit) that all individualism and intellectualism is wiped from the earth. Huxley recognized that a world built on the pursuit of immediate pleasure may be peaceful, but it is even more horrific.

But this is an article about smartphones, right? What does soma have to do with smartphones?

Smartphones are the closest thing we have to soma. They may not be the perfect drug, but they aren’t far off.

Smartphones smooth out the uncomfortable bumps of life. They are an escape from any reality that is mildly uncomfortable. They are a stiff-arm against any form of solitude or silence. They are the wall between reality and our minds. They erase my individuality and intellect little by little.

This article isn’t meant to demonize smartphones or convince you to revert to communicating via smoke signals or a Motorola Razr. Unlike soma, there are healthy ways to use smartphones. I’d like to offer a few suggestions for taking back some of your life from your smartphone.

1. “Do Not Disturb”

Can I have your un-divided attention? Probably not.

I bet this article isn’t the only tab open on your browser/phone. I bet you’ve been distracted by something else since you started reading. Now, I’m not saying that you owe me your undivided attention. I’m just saying that, in our culture, undivided attention is a precious commodity. It’s so precious that you probably don’t have any.

If you want to be able to offer more un-divided attention to the important people, work, and activities in your life, give them a fighting chance. Turn on the “Do Not Disturb” feature on your phone. It’s one of the simplest ways to give yourself the gift of un-divided attention.

2. Disable Push Notifications

A bird’s wing span is the distance from the tip of one wing to the other. Your attention span is the distance between your last notification and your next.

Even with my phone on “Do Not Disturb,” I still have a tendency to pull it out every few minutes to check for notifications (which—in turn—pull me away from whatever/whoever I was just focusing on). My hard-wired attraction to novelty makes this a difficult habit to kick.

That’s why I’ve disabled all push notifications on my phone (OK, except texts). No more interruptions. I no longer expect my phone to have some email, update, reminder, or tweet waiting for me. When I give my attention to my phone, it is on my timetable, not my notifications’.

3. Boundaries with Bae

If there’s a pretty girl sending me text messages throughout the day, you can bet that my smartphone is going to receive a lot of my attention. And even though I am both pro-texting and pro-pretty-girls, those two make a terrible combination, especially if I’m trying to spend less time on my phone.

If you spend a little bit too much time texting bae, here are a few ideas to keep him/her happy, but also cut back on the texting. (Also, the conversation should not start with, “Boo, have I told you how much of a distraction you are?”)

Talk about ways to give one another more undivided attention

Write letters, not texts

Just text during lunch

Commit to having conversations face-to-face or phone-to-phone

4. Delete Games

Is your smartphone really a $600 piece of “gaming” equipment?

5. Delete Email App

Before I had the courage to delete my email app, I had to come to the realization that nothing life-threatening happens over email. No email requires (or should require) an immediate response. All of those un-read emails can hang out until I decide to give them attention on my laptop.

6. Delete Facebook and/or Twitter

There’s nothing wrong with having either of these apps on your phone. But if you find that your smartphone controls more of your time and attention than you like, deleting these two will go a long way. In my experience, a phone without these apps is refreshing, not limiting. I don’t miss them at all.

7. Delete the Internet Browser

You would think that being able to know the answer to any question at any time would make our generation the smartest of all time. In reality, it’s making us one of the dumbest. Why read, contemplate, or memorize when I can outsource my brain to Google? Why learn anything when I can find it more quickly on a smartphone? Why care about knowledge when I have data?

True knowledge is more about asking the right questions than it is about knowing answers. Our generation knows lots and lots of answers, but not to any of the good questions.

I deleted my web browser because I found that the questions I was asking in life were dumb. I was asking my smartphone dozens of questions every single day that had little to no value. Now that I’ve taken away my ability to find the answer to any dumb question at any time, I have more time and attention to focus on things that make me think well. Like books and people and stuff.

8. “Lose” Yourself With Smarter Apps

Not every moment can be packed with meaningful conversation, study, and creativity. Inevitably, you’ll need to kill some time on your smartphone. Everybody poops.

But you can occupy yourself with something better than Angry Birds or Twitter. Give crosswords or sudoku puzzles a try. Read a free book on the Kindle app. Memorize Bible verses or poetry. Try doing something less passive and more active. When we talk about passive activities we say things like, “Sorry, I got distracted by this video.” We don’t say that stuff with things that are actively engaging. We don’t get distracted by a good book or a good thought. We get lost in them.

Find apps that help you to “lose” yourself, not distract yourself.

9. Take Away “Install New Apps” Capability

Even if we’ve decided against it, our brains always take the path of least resistance. If we delete Facebook and Super-Mega-Clash Battle IV today, odds are good that we’ll download them again tomorrow. And then we’ll spend just as much time on them, only with an added sense of guilt that we suck at willpower.

The solution is to turn the path of least resistance into the path of most resistance. You can do this by disabling the “install new apps” capability on your phone. Have a friend or roommate create a restriction pass code (that you won’t know) so that you cannot add new apps to your phone without consulting them. It will be frustrating, but that’s the point.

10. Forget Passwords

Another solution to staying off of time-wasting apps is to forget your passwords. Rather than delete an app, you can simply log out. If you don’t know your password, you won’t be able to waste time on the app.

I do this by generating random, 20-character passwords and writing them down on a note card. If I want to stay off of Snapchat or Instagram for a little while, I just log out. When I want to log back in, I have to find the note card (which I hide somewhere new every time I use it) to get the password. Is this weird? Yes. Absolutely. But it allows me to give un-divided attention to the important things in my life.

11. Keep It Off The Table

When a person sits down and puts his smartphone on the table I die a little bit. I feel no remorse in saying that is one of the rudest things in the world. Don’t do it. Instead…

12. Leave It In The Car

Right now, I am at a coffee shop and my phone is at my house. Intentionally.

I have instinctively reached for my phone a dozen times this morning. Every time I do, I’m reminded how little I need it. I’m reminded how much of a crutch it is for boredom and awkwardness. I’m reminded how uncomfortable I am with silence. And I love it. It’s kind of fun to live in the moment instead of in a screen.

Which is why—for the last month—I have been intentionally leaving my phone in my car or at my house when I go places. This forces me to, you know, talk to people. It un-divides my attention. It allows me to observe better. It allows me to be present. And if I need it, my car isn’t that far away.

13. “Tech Sabbath”

Brett McKay over at Art of Manliness reserves his Sundays as a “Tech Sabbath.” He disconnects from all of his electronic devices for 24 hours to rest and “reboot.” This is his way of giving extra un-divided time and attention to his family.

Your Tech Sabbath doesn’t need to be a whole day, but incorporating regular rhythms of un-plugging is a good idea. In a world where we are constantly and immediately connected to everyone, it can be nice to embrace your inner Ron Swanson and get off the grid.

14. Keep It Out of Bed

Don’t keep your phone near your bed. It ruins your sleep in the evening. It distracts you from getting out of bed in the morning. Put it on the other side of the room.

And don’t use it as an alarm clock, either. It’s too tempting to snooze and climb back into bed with your phone. Get a real alarm clock and create a meaningful morning routine that doesn’t involve your stupid phone.

I’m right. Live with it.

15. Grayscale

Color is stimulating and addicting. Grayscale is boring. Turning your phone’s color scheme to grayscale changes it from being a portable Las Vegas Strip to a portable piece of The Rest of Nevada.