Thank you so much, each and everyone of you for your kind words, your sympathy, and for supporting Vincenzo and me during his illness.

I'm doing o.k. Of course, I did not want Vinny to leave me like this, but we don't always get what we want, do we? I take comfort from knowing that I did EVERYTHING I could for Vin, and you all are a huge part of me being able to do so. You gave me great advice, and you gave Vinny and me strength when we needed it the most. I do feel some guilt about not doing everything right before Vinny developed the cancer, but as Maya and Oprah say "When you know better, you do better". This is so true for me. Don't worry, though, I don't BLAME myself because I know Vinny had a predisposition to this horrible disease, or he would not have gotten it so badly, so young, and been gone so quickly.

I have something else I need to share with you all. I am taking a chance that some of you might think I'm crazy, but frankly, if you haven't figured that out by now, I need to share a LOT more of my inner most thoughts with you. Today, I came home for lunch, like every day. I walked into my kitchen and noticed that my little kitchen table had water all over it. My roof/ceiling had leaked from all the rain yesterday and today (even the Sky is crying). As I'm getting towels and looking around to move things off the table, I noticed that two very wet items had already been moved off the table and to the counter. They were things I'd recently bought for Vinny, a box of homeopathic remedies and the cold/hot pack Id use'd on his leg. Joe came home for lunch too and arrived right after me. I asked him if he'd moved that stuff over and he had no idea what I was talking about. He didn't know about the leaking ceiling. I talked to my son later, the only other person with access to our house and he hadn't been home this morning either. I thought about this and realized that Vinny moved those things over to the counter. Vinny gave me a sign to comfort me. Do you get why I think this is a sign from Vin? It was only two objects of HIS that were moved with about ten more items left on the table. HIs items were wet from the rain water, and no PERSON who has access to this house touched them. The only other explanation I can think of is that Reno or Guido did it, and I'm thinking a spirit has a lot better chance of doing this than G or Wee do! Vinny let me know that he is o.k. and not too far away. It gives me the most comfort to know he is still with me, just in a different form. Love transends all boundaries. So does the spirit.

I hope everyone who is mourning the passing of our Vincenzo can feel peace as I do with this sign.

As to his passing, I think the worst part went pretty quickly, all things considered. We made sure he was as comfortable as possible. I didn't give up hope until Sunday. Everyone who saw him in those last hours agreed that he was not in pain, but he did suffer. I hoped his bad shape was going to get better and I HAD to give him a chance. He'd recovered from so much so far. The amount of really bad shape was short and we took care of his comfort the whole time.

Vinny let me know that he is o.k. and not too far away. It gives me the most comfort to know he is still with me, just in a different form. Love transends all boundaries. So does the spirit.

I don't think you're nuts at all. It seems to me like you and Vinny had a very special relationship, when you talk about that day that you guys had your talk, and he got up. That's just amazing. I'm glad he gave you a sign that he is still hanging around, Vinny is a good kid

I feel the need to clarify my comment about Vinny suffering. I don't want you all to think I abandoned him at the end. He did not appear to be in any pain. His eyes did not show it nor was he shaking or shivering. I think he suffered only because he couldn't get up. He was like that the time before when I had "the talk" with him and you all know how that ended up. To me, after having experienced this, there is a difference between suffering and pain. Maybe suffering isn't even the right word. Maybe I should say I think it was hard for him to lay there and not be able to get up. We had to wait until Monday to get him into the clinic so there wasn't much we could do for him except keep him comfortable. I believe it was better that he was home, in our living room with loved ones around him and no anxiety about being at the clinic. The last couple of times we had gone there, it was pretty obvious he did not want to be there and he was anxious about it. If we had been able to euth him on Sunday, I would always wonder if I'd done it too soon, if we could have given him different meds, or if he would have snapped out of it like before. Vinny left me no doubt that we could do nothing more to try to save him.

Thanks for reading the ramblings of a grieving mother. I will now try to stop rambling, get past the grieving, and start to celebrate the life of a wonderful dog.

Thanks for reading the ramblings of a grieving mother. I will now try to stop rambling, get past the grieving, and start to celebrate the life of a wonderful dog.

I think you need to do whatever it is to help yourself heal. If you need to ramble, ramble. If you want to celebrate, celebrate, if you need to ramble and celebrate at the same time we're here for whatever you need to do.

Here is a poem I thought I'd share, sent to me from someone at Dog Cancer Care. I felt some comfort reading it.

A LOAN FROM GOD

God promised at the birth of time, a special friend to give,his time on earth is short, he said, so love him while helives. It may be six or seven years, or twelve or thensixteen, but will you, till I call him back, take care of him forme? A wagging tail and cold wet nose, and silken velvetears, a heart as big as all outdoors, to love you through theyears. His puppy ways will gladden you, and antics bring asmile, as guardian or friend he will, be loyal all the while.He'll bring his charms to grace your life, and though his staybe brief, when he's gone the memories, are solace for yourgrief. I cannot promise he will stay, since all from earthreturn, but lessons only a dog can teach, I want you eachto learn. Whatever love you give to him, returns in triplemeasure, follow his lead and gain a life, brim full of simplepleasure. Enjoy each day as it comes, allow your heart toguide, be loyal and steadfast in love, as the dog there byyour side. Now will you give him all your love, nor think thelabor vain, nor hate me when I come to call, to take himback again? I fancy each of us would say, "Dear Lord, thywill be done, for all the joy this day shall bring, the risk ofgrief we'll run." "We'll shelter him with tenderness, we'll lovehim while we may, and for the happiness we've known,forever grateful stay." "But shall the angels call for him,much sooner than we've planned, we'll brave the bitter griefthat comes, and try to understand."

It is so hard for me to read these threads especially because I know this feeling oh too well...

Our dogs are truly a blessing and though they leave us way too soon. They bring us so much joy and unconditional love that is makes letting them go so tough. I think they are sent to teach us so many things and remind ups how precious life is...

Hugs tears and prayers for you and your family. My condolences.

Run hard and play free at the rainbow Bridge sweet baby!You are in our hearts and thoughts here and will be remembered...

Patch O' Pits Pursuit-O-Perfection

Run Hard at the Rainbow Bridge My Angel Sock-M! I Love You Baby Girl! Now that your Mom Starlit is up there too, please help her learn the ropes, love and keep her company until I can see you both again. Starlit I love you!http://i14.tinypic.com/2a8q345.jpg