Is that waiter texting or taking my order?

The new Bluestem Brasserie has a very modern look, and waiters who take your order on a computer.

The manners regarding texting while dining is clear: You shouldn’t do it, at least not at the table. Yet if you look at the telltale blue glows piercing the dining rooms, you’ll have proof that it’s done all the time. Some diners just can’t leave the outside world behind. Personally I like the idea of having a safe harbor that keeps the outside world at bay, but obviously not everyone agrees.

So let me tell explain another scenario and see if this situation is any easier to accept. How would you feel about a waiter standing over your table and texting while you’re trying to order your meal?

That’s essentially what happens at the brand new Bluestem on Market near Fourth Street, a modern brasserie with a high-tech look created by Olle Lundberg who is the vision behind Slanted Door and the new wavy roofed bus stops in San Francisco. It’s a cool space, so I’m sure the owners are trying to reinforce that cutting-edge design. Each waiter has a hand-held computer about twice the size of a Blackberry. Instead of a pad and paper or a very good memory, the server hovers over you and punches in your order.

It feels like he’s texting. The staff may get better with practice, but for now the process is painfully slow and awkward. Our server was so glued to the screen he never made eye contact. The machine — and, thus, the waiter — had as much warmth and personality as a white wall. It reminded me of talking to my 16-year-old niece who was texting the entire time I was giving her a tour of San Francisco, longing to be anywhere but with me.

After our waiter left the table, he went to the service station and spent another couple of minutes on the screen. Other servers finished as they left the table; their eyes were so locked onto the screen they didn’t notice if diners needed anything.

This system might seem more efficient in the planning stages, but in reality it builds an impersonal dynamic between the customer and the waiter. It takes a server’s mind off the customer and transfers it to a machine. In the end, my order wasn’t right: I had asked for the blue cheese sauce on the steak, but I got the Bluestem sauce, and two sides didn’t show up until we asked about them.

About 10 years ago, several restaurants used similar Point of Sale systems, but they never caught on, at least at the independent restaurants I frequent. I’m sure that in the last decade the technology has improved, but this is the first I’ve seen since then. I also hope it’s the last. That little machine creates a barrier between the diner and the waiter. It takes the waiter away from the table and into the clouds. It feels cold and impersonal, the last thing I want when I visit a restaurant.

Maybe I’m hopelessly old-fashioned in this regard. I’d love to know what you think.