Todd McFarlane Vows the New ‘Spawn’ Will Be ‘Dark’ With ‘No Joy’

Hey! Do you like superheroes but hate when they bring you joy or pleasure or any kind of satisfaction? Well you are in luck! Because here comes Spawn, a movie that its own creator and film director promises will contain none of those things!

So swears Todd McFarlane, the creator of the Spawn comic book and now the director of the upcoming film reboot of the property. (Spawn got his first movie way back in 1997. In strictly scientific terms, it was ungodly terrible.)

There’s no joy. There’s gonna be no fun lines in it, and it’s just gonna be this dark, ugly two hours worth of movie, which is essentially what a lot of supernatural/horror movies are anyway. There’s not a lot of funny in them. And that seems to be a weird hurdle for a lot of people in this city to get over because they sort of go into a superhero/Avengers default all the time.

Wait, didn’t they already make this movie and call it Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice?

Just kidding. In fairness to McFarlane, Spawn is pretty dark stuff (it is about a literal spawn of hell after all) so the material isn’t exactly suited to bright colors and wisecracks. They should double down and make this the tagline. “No joy. No fun lines. Dark, ugly. Spawn — coming soon.”

Spawn doesn’t have a release date, but shooting is currently scheduled to begin this summer with Jamie Foxx as Spawn and Jeremy Renner as police officer Twitch Williams.