Every variety of cheese in the world, served with dog biscuits spread with butter.

***

P.S. There's no way they'll give me any wine.

P.S.S. What they're actually eating is leftovers of roast lamb and vegetables mixed with a horrid mouth-burning chilli sauce, served with rice. I might just get a few scraps of unadulterated meat and grains of rice tossed into my bowl if I manage to keep all four paws on the floor.