Glum thoughts are occupying the mind of the Russian striker Artem Dzubiya, who found out on Tuesday that his country were cutting him from their Euro 2012 squad and, as if that wasn't deflating enough, now learns that he is sought after by Aston Villa. Then again, maybe that is not such a sorry situation – indeed, that is the very question with which Dzubiya may be grappling as we speak: is having no manager better than having Alex McLeish as manager?

West Bromwich Albion don't have a manager either but soon they will have, with several papers announcing that Ralf Rangnick will be appointed as Roy Hodgson's successor later this week. No mention is made of how many languages Rangnick speaks, nor of his taste in high-brow fiction, but we are assured that he is an able manager all the same and little attention should be paid to the fact that he has been out of work since stepping down from Schalke last September because of fatigue. Fatigue, funnily enough, seems to be one of the main reasons Rangnick will get this job, as Albion have grown tired of haggling with Birmingham for the services of Chris Hughton.

Rangnick may not get a chance to work with Ben Foster, as the former Manchester United goalkeeper, who has previously admitted that he struggled to cope with the pressure of playing for a big club, is wanted by Spurs. You know the punchline.

It remains to be seen, of course, whether Foster, or anyone for that matter, wants to go to Spurs. The saggy second half of last season that cost them a Champions League spot may also cost them their top players, as Manchester United are (still) mulling over a move for Luka Modric and Schalke are preparing a £12m bid for Rafael van der Vaart, who they hope will jump at the chance of playing (about 65 minutes of) Champions League matches next season.

Adam Johnson almost never plays 90 minutes either but that could change if Alan Pardew's fluttering eyelashes lure him to Newcastle. But Manchester City's suddenly subdued neighbours may try to entice him to Old Trafford instead.

Meanwhile, the Sun tells us that "Ken Bates wants a mystery Canadian consortium seeking to buy Leeds United to double their offer to £80m", which suggests that Bates is intent on finding out a thing or two about this mystery consortium, starting with how dumb they are.

After missing out on one superstar tease from the Low Countries, Manchester City are turning their attention to Wesley Sneijder, whose famously extravagant wage demands are now believed to equate to one pound for every transfer rumour featuring him.

Meanwhile, Vincent Kompany has reportedly let Barcelona know he has no intention of leaving City any time soon. Of course, Barça would be unlikely to be able to afford him anyway. With Spanish banks on the brink of being bust and therefore disinclined to empty money into the pockets of Real Madrid or Barça, Manchester United fancy their chances of competing with that pair for Bayern Munich's versatile 19-year-old David Alaba. Arsenal could gazump the lot of them, but, as ever, it seems that Arsenal are content to know that they can spend big rather than actually do it. So they'll be hoping that Southampton and West Ham don't start getting serious in their pursuit of the Real Madrid reserve striker Joselu, who is also kind of wanted by Arsène Wenger.

There are also extraordinary claims that Wenger wants to add the Dutch kung fu king Nigel De Jong to his Arsenal midfield.