Saturday, September 6, 2014

Am I the only one who travels here without having to put "gay itineraries" in my agenda whenever I travel?

I find that a lot of gay guys have this need of searching for places that are gay-friendly, and that really strikes to me as saying "can I cruise for sex here?"

I may be wrong, but chances are I am right about this.When I travel I focus on the sightseeings, cool things to see, street festivals, kickass pubs and comfy lounges, and such...doesn't matter to me whether it is gay friendly or not.I mean, yes it would be great to meet other gay guys during my trip, but I just find it that guys are limiting themselves of 'where to go' for a vacation when they're focusing on gay-friendly-accepting-areas.Sorry if I have offended anyone, but I'm just wondering?

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Response from Sunbuns (me) to Ash's question:

Let me assure you that I am NOT arguing your point.Just commenting and adding my own opinion.

It is a curious thing. I believe that in the future (hopefully not so long a time to come) that most gays won't be in a position and in the state of mind that limits them to choosing only a 'gay' destination. But -- at that point in time -- there won't be a need for sites such as this one either.

It's a matter of perspective and purpose.

You're on the gay channel -- remember. I am very sure that if you went to a general travel forum -- such as TravBuddies, etc, and similar sites, IF you could ask the members and get an honest answer (from some of those who post travel blogs, photos, review, etc), about who is gay, you'd find a lot are. I am positive you would get a larger than 'average' percentage of members. They are on that site because they want to learn about and talk about travel. Their purpose is not anything else - while people join and visit Dudesnude mainly for other reasons - than to talk about travel.

This site is called 'Dudesnude' for a reason. The population is heavily weighted to guys who are

horny, seeking some kind of gratification (not only sexual), and / or who like looking at (or talking/chatting) with similar guys.

The fact that there are plenty (still a minority) who are here for other reasons or who aren't always looking for sex / hook-ups shouldn't allow you to draw major conclusions about all 'gay' people or gay travelers.

Another thing is your age.

You seem to be of the latter generation (younger) - one that has (possibly) grown up without the layers upon layers of prejudice (still existing to a large degree) and discrimination (exists far, far less than 20-30 years ago) when the 40+ generation was going through late adolescence and young adulthood. Note please; I did not say that your generation has never experienced those things but it's a matter of degree. (We older folks always think things were tougher back in our 'days'. *lol* - so allow me that delusion (although I do believe there is enough truth in the idea. )

It was a different time even 20 years ago - at the time just before the first big AIDS epidemic -- and what seems normal behavior for young gay men nowadays was hardly tolerated at all -- except in some special 'gay' places. Some gay men today tend to think that way. Just one theory.

Another reason may be the way you can express yourself (in your home community) and also what you want out of a vacation may be very different -- sometimes quite extremely so. Coming from liberalized, enlightened Canada, especially a very cosmopolitan place such as Toronto (I think that where you're from) - you probably don't feel the need to go off for a vacation -- just to be your 'gay' self - it is something you can do happily right in your own community - without free of reprisal or even physical danger.

But even today in small town rural America - in Kentucky for example (where I lived most of my adolescence) seeing guys hold hands (or God forbid - kiss) is still an absolute social no-no. There are no gay bars except for a hour or 2 hour drive away and Pride is considered to be one of the 7 deadly sins -- not a summer event for the gay crowd. Gay people still don't have much of a face on the local state college campus even now -- nearly 25 years since my friends and I started the first GLBT Association on that campus.

Your purpose for travel may include things that some people can't (or don't want) to be involved with. Travel seems to be a very highly personalized activity - especially how one perceives of the 'travel' experience and its meaning.

A vacation is not the same time as travel -- although travel can also be a vacation is (usually) much more -- especially for people like you and me.

Perhaps some just see the trip (or vacation) as an extended long stay version of 'the one-night stand," whereas you (or me) might see if as something more or different or maybe not. They don't necessarily see their trip (not matter how well planned and expensive) as a real travel experience - but simply as 'vacating' their normal premises (changing spaces -- not 'exchanging' places (becoming someone new by experiencing a new cultural perspective in an unknown place in the word).

For me it is often a time of reflection, self-discovery, having new experiences or cultural lessons, and even spiritual development. But it can also be about sex and physical gratification (pleasure/desire), too. Some people may see it as a combination of all of these.

Perhaps too you're happy with your sexuality and satisfied with your romantic and sexual relationships. So you are looking for that desperately -- like some men are. For many people, the urge to find a 'mate' forms a major part of the agenda for a vacation. So the idea of choosing a 'gay' resort / gay-friendly area increases the chances of consummating that desire.

I agree totally. There are so many wonderful places in the world worth visiting - -why limit yourself by going ONLY to gay 'resorts'. However, it is also true that more and more of these great vacation spots are actively trying to 'recruit' new tourists who are gay and are actively selling themselves as 'gay-friendly' destinations. The average income of gays (in general) is fairly high - so it has become a segment of the population that is often courted by the travel industry.

Grou.ps/cmnm / Tribe.net/ Facebook CMNM Dudes

Tribe.net is an alternative social networking site (that's much older than Facebook, and one that allows discreet adult mature content (For Friends Only). TRIBE.NET no longer works.There are thousands of different tribes (public and private) groups in Tribe.net, whose members can share discussions and a gallery of uploaded photos. Members can make blogs, add friends, and set up events and advertize with Tribe.net widespread network. There is a private CMNM tribe so if you send me a request by email, I can invite you to: http://cmnm.tribe.net---------------

CMNM Social Network(s), CNMN Forum, CMNM Wiki

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What is CMNM?

This blog is devoted to experiences, stories, advice, discussions (at least to save them from being deleted or disappearing), information, links to other Net resources, and (maybe) visual media for guys who are into (n2) CMNM - clothed male-naked male scenes. Not everyone who is interested in or turned on by the CMNM scene is gay, bi, or curious. CMNM is not simply a homosexual form of behavior. Actually, there are plenty of straight guys, who consciously or even subconsciously get some satisfaction from being naked or clothed with other naked men. Maybe they are just horny or starved for affection. There are also women who are turned on or intrigued by reality of a man being naked in front of clothed men and/or clothed women (or the reverse). Whether this nakedness is natural, socially acceptable, expected, forced on them, or totally exhibitionist, it generally involves either sexual arousal for the naked guy or the clothed guy(s) watching or for both. Such is the magic of this complicated scene - CMNM.

It's really a sexual preference lifestyle issue, but some would call it a sexual fetish or perversion. However, in many ways, male nudity permeates almost all aspects of male-to-male relationships and influences the nature of masculinity and what it means to be a man.

Men use nudity and exposure of body parts or genitals to communicate affection, friendship, camaraderie, power /control, and even distain or disgust. Being aware CMNM scenes and being turned on by them is subconscious for most males. We're just a select few who have recognized it as a separate way of psycho-sexual interaction and, for some personal or social stimulation.Once you think more deeply about it, you'll be able recognize and see its effects in buddy-to-buddy friendships, sports and athletic camaraderie, male-bonding and growing up, rites of passages for young males, social events, public and private clubs and social organizations, schooling, and especially in the past - even the constant girl-chasing pack mentality of romance, male lust (and sex) and the antics and rituals associated with those. More recent acceptance of gays in society has meant that 'guy-chasing' and the behaviors around that once secretive activity are becoming more known. So CMNM (like CFNM - "clothed female-naked male") is becoming a recognized category of human sexual activity.

Latest Event News

Los Angeles Strip Poker Party for CMNM Dudes January 15 or 16, 2011

A small group of CMNM members from LA M4M Strippoker Yahoo Group meets at a private apartment in Los Angeles, CA
Los Angeles Strip Poker Party for CMNM Dudes, The next party will be either January 15 (Sat) or 16 (Sun), 2011. preferably in the afternoon, but evenings are possible, depending availability of the attendees.

Please see the Crush3r link above for more details, but send your request directly to JC, the organizer, NOT TO ME. Please read the Crush3r link on how to contact him.

Resources related to CMNM (websites, groups, individual blogs, etc).

Social Network Communities

It's a continuing saga. Ning (one of the world's largest after Facebook) decided to remove all adult-content, sexually explicit/graphic groups in January 2009. Now it seems that others will be going that way too or at least making it difficult to host such groups.

After exploring SocialGo.com as a potential new home for our Guys Into CMNM Ning (which was deleted by Ning as of January 1, 2009), I was resigned to choosing it after having explored quite a few alternative. But recently (12/28/2008), I discovered WebJam. It's a whole lot better -- for what I want in a social networking site, but it's got its limitations - as do they all. Since then, SocialGo has decided to ask adult-content, sexually graphic groups to start paying beginning in April. At $49 a month, it's not worth it and I doubt anyone wants to share the cost. Therefore, the CMNM.socialgo.com group will moved and eventually removed.

Another rather new entry into the social networking market is Grou.ps (yes... it has a 'period' in that word).

In the end, I'll choose adaptability and customization over ease and simplicity. But that's not true for everyone I realize. Therefore, there will be several in many different Guys On CMNM online communities - as time goes by, members will tend to gravitate to the one(s) that have more appeal and usability for them. So that's how I will operate the Guys Into CMNM Ring of Networks -- there will be over a different types of CMNM networks:

Guys Into CMNM Ring of Social Networks - pick out the one that suits you.

Webjam http://www.webjam.com/cmnm - The most flexible, customizable, and most like Ning (except for Video gallery), embedded video OK, multiple page profiles with many kinds of modules (widgets, RSS feeds, etc)

SocialGo http://cmnm.socialgo.com - Slow, simple interface, little customization possible, it has the basics, but was soon abandoned by the large adult content networks, rumored to become for-pay soon (will be moved to Socialgo's new adult-content service on Feb 15 and they will be charging in April -- thus TO BE DELETED April 1, 2009). For some strange reason, it still exists but no one ever logs in.

Grou.ps http://grou.ps/cmnm - Poor designed and buggy code, might have potential, but you can only share video from Youtube (and two other non-porno sites), embeddable vids in Wiki (Wall) only (not blogs).

NOTE about Grou.ps : ( June 2009) They gradually made progress with the Grou.ps site, adding some new functionality and -- most importantly - some speed. Recently, there have been many new members joining (over 1200) and the Video (embedded) has greatly improved. However, many of the large Grou.ps (Dan's Public Sex, for example, etc) have been turned into 'subscription' only membership. You have to pay (or sign-up for adverts/products, etc) in order to earn 'credits' to pay for your subscription. I don't think it will be too long before they force all adult content grou.ps to pay for subscription membership.

Orkut: http://www.orkut.com/Main#Community.aspx?rl=cpn&cmm=57809762 (recently Orkut has cracked down on adult / sexual content).My gmail id can longer log into Orkut. So I doubt the CMNM still exists.

Queerclique: There is now a CMNM group inside Queerclique (which uses the former Socialgo network as its 'branded' host server). Queerclique is the free social networking community for QueerClick (the commercial gay porn mega-blog and gallery site). Membership requires aproval.

Facebook Group: CMNM Facebook Group I founded this group in FB, but it's now moderated by someone else. Because adult content is strictly banned (not so much in private profile) and nude photos are not allowed, the group isn't very active. I learned this the hard way - my first FB account was summarily deleted (and so was my profile and status).

Yahoo Group: CMNM http://groups.yahoo.com/group/cmnmGayWatch: CMNM group http://www.gaywatch.com/view_group.php?group_id=102Lifeout: CMNM group http://www.lifeout.com/groups.php?group=1050HardHornyMe.com http://www.hardhornyme.com/gay/ Once a member, go to groups: cmnm It doesn't have much functionality as a site yet.