The Forum Conspiracy

BANG!

BANG!

BANG!

In the early twilight hours of an ordinary Sunday, three shots ring out. If not for the few houses nearby, maybe these shots never would've been heard. But they were. And waiting for the police of the ERBoH Forum is the body of a man larger than life, dead; two holes in the back, one in the back of the head. Before long, there's the familiar sound of blaring sirens in the air, a sleeping neighborhood illuminated by flashing green lights. Inside this squad car are two of only five troopers in the generally peaceful Forum, Adonis and Rocket.

"Shiiiiiiiit," Rocket complains as Adonis flies down the street in disregard of the speed limit, "if we gotta use our guns I'm quittin'."

Neither of them say a word after they get out of the car, taking no more than a few moments to spot the lifeless corpse on the ground. It's not just a dead body, and it's not just a murdered dead body. It is the king of the entire country, Vincent Bulletin, known commonly as VBulletin. He'd been on a peace tour of the country up until now, and he decided to stop in the ERBoH Forum since the area is a hotbed of political controversy.

The radio is a glossy white hemisphere with a light blue border that lights up anytime they press the button of the same color in the center of the flat side. There's a tiny microphone in the middle of the spherical side, which Adonis points towards his mouth while holding down the button.

"Sam, Sam," Adonis called out to the sheriff over the five officers, "VBulletin is the victim, get down h-"

Before he finishes, there's a flash of crimson light, followed by faint red smoke. Standing in the haze is Juiz, one of the three executives of the police force.

"Sam?" Juiz asks in disappointed confusion, "The king died and you called Sam? What's he gonna do for you, call me or Dion? If we weren't about to get royally fucked by the V-Force, I'd relieve you of your duties right here and now, Adonis."

A second after that, there's another flash of the same colored light; now Dion, another executive (senior to Juiz), is standing in the red fog with his hand on Sam's shoulder.

"Shitshow time, boys!" Dion shouted with rogue joy, "They're about to sick the fuckin' dogs on us. Rocket and Adonis, you guys head home. Sam, shut this whole neighborhood down. Juiz, prepare an announcement for... 7, 8 AM? I'm rolling out into the hellhole myself, I love you guys."

Rocket and Adonis don't need to be told twice to go home, and their green squad car is far out of sight in seconds. Sam gives a nod to Juiz and Dion before throwing up caution tape around VBulletin's body and heading out to evacuate the four or five forumers in the small town the king was killed in.

Now I'm sure you have some questions.

Who is this king?
What is the V-Force?
What hellhole is Dion referring to?

It is my job to explain.

---

Up until a year or so ago, the ERBoH Forum was heaven on Earth. Part of the Bulletin continent but not under the strict order of its royal family, it was the one independent Forum. Due to perfect environmental conditions and a rich culture exclusive to ERBoH, the citizens have always been born with divine abilities that some would consider and have historically considered superpowers. King Ulysses Bulletin, UBulletin, had established a law known as The PHPBB Act:

Powerful
Humans
Protected
Behind
Borders

Under this law, any Forum inhabited in majority by people with superhuman powers was exempt from being colonized by the Bulletin Royal Government (BRG). With his secret service known as the U-Force, Ulysses fiercely protected the border of ERBoH, keeping the Forumers as isolated as they wished to remain. However, some members of the family hated this. They wanted the mystical land of ERBoH, with no care for the people there. They were merely seen as the betatest of the next evolutionary level, dipping their toes in the water for the Bulletin family.

Ulysses hated this as much as his relatives hated him, but it was clear he was outnumbered. It's been a little over a year since Bulletin Manor was burnt to the ground, killing Ulysses, his wife, and his three children inside like overcooked chicken. Ulysses' only brother had died more than a decade ago, so popular favor decided that his brother's firstborn son would take over. Vincent Bulletin, a flameheaded 18 year old noble was sure to reroll The PHPBB Act on the day of his coronation, his intentions clear.

As the U-Force transitioned into the V-Force, they went from protecting the borders to entering them. They set up a BRG Embassy about two miles within the boundaries of ERBoH, and began talking with the police executives to set up tourism and maybe even housing in the forum. It was a peace offer to the outside world and a full blown invasion to the ERBoH Forumers; they realized their days of peace were rapidly numbering. It was clear that the Bulletins wanted more than tourism, they wanted the whole damn Forum.

All they need is an excuse for the rest of the continent to turn on ERBoH so they don't have to hide their invasion force...

And their king has just died...

On ERBoH soil

Last edited by Ludwig; 12-05-2018 at 06:24 PM.

Hey, I'm Ludwig, and I'm a former Global Moderator! Always here to talk! If you haven't already, register an account!

Oh hell to the yes. Dumb hyped for this, so far so good my friend, keep it up.

Your friendly neighborhood Dadministrator

Got a question? Just need someone to chat with? Drop me a PM!

Stuff:

Spoiler:

Forum Awards:

Spoiler:

September 2014 Member of the Month
December 2014 Member of the Month
ERBoH.com's 2014 Artist of the Year
ERBoH.com's 2014 Member of the Year
February 2016 Member of the Month
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ERBoH.com's 2016 Chatter of the Year
ERBoH.com's 2016 Most Active User of the Year
ERBoH.com's 2016 Best Meme of the Year (SEX PONIES)
ERBoH.com's 2016 Best REWF of the Year (Juiz vs Helioptle)
ERBoH.com's 2016 Spammer of the Year
ERBoH.com's 2016 Best Username of the Year (Hugh Mungus)

le epic maymays xdd:

Spoiler:

Originally Posted by Rocket

Is Juiz darth vader? i hope so because that means he gets to be a dad

Originally Posted by Dion

This isn't the first time Juiz has given Sane a forced analysis pounding and it won't be the last.

Originally Posted by Samilton

juiz is a revolutionary

Originally Posted by Dion

get cancer

Originally Posted by Samilton

They're called Japanese people, Juiz

Originally Posted by Gika

The fiirst rule of ERBOH.com is: You do not tell Juiz what to do.
The second rule of ERBOH.com is: You DO NOT tell Juiz what to do.

Originally Posted by Sans

do you have a moment to hear about our lord and savior juizus

Originally Posted by Rocket

sorry polar, im a moderator of the people

and the people say you suck

Originally Posted by sane

"Don't be such a pussy Sam." shouted Juiz, the big, strong, captivating godly man that he was.

Originally Posted by YellowNerd

I love juiz more than his girlfriend does

Originally Posted by sane

My name is Sane, and this is my buddy Juiz, we're kind of a big deal and we can kick a lot of ass and love Wonderwall.

Originally Posted by sane

this forum is dead and I am the necrophiliac who will fuck it back to life

Originally Posted by Brad

Juiz, you are truly the Shakespeare of our time. I laughed. I cried. I gave up red meat. Thank you, you beautiful bright ray of freedom in this otherwise fascist community. Thank you.

The Forum Conspiracy

Part 1: Crown of WBulletin

Chapter I: Who Killed the King?

"Breaking news: straight from Executive Juiz, King Vincent Bulletin has been killed at the Yuarelle Village," a male news anchor spoke across all tvs in the ERBoH Forum, regardless of if they were on or not, "I'm Top Hattington for EFN."

"And I'm Polar Bore for EFN," a female anchor evidently named Polar continued Top's point, "Yuarelle is notable for being the border town that blocks the rest of the Forum from the rest of the continent. Its only four inhabitants are our border patrol; Juiz confirmed that all houses have been evacuated in response. King Vincent was 19 years old, his 21 year old sister Winona is next in line for the throne."

"I'll be next in line for a drink!" Top proclaimed, "Speaking of which, Spartica is proud to report to EFN that he has three new ERBrews for sale to get you nice and hammered. Be sure to head on down to Havok Brewing or The Spar Bar to try out his Rep and Rap Ale, TDFE IPA, or Tawwwww Lager."

"Ayyyy Sparts," Wumbo cheered while sitting down at a tall stool, "how much did you have to fondle Hattington's balls to get that promotion?"

"I didn't have to," Spartica responded, wiping out a recently washed glass, "you spend so much here that I just paid him off regularly."

"Fuck you," Wumbo cursed at him, taking a deep, finishing sip of his TDFE IPA, "but like, can I get another one though?"

"Sure," Spartica answered cheerfully, "I was looking to air another ad for the place anyways. Thanks for keeping Havok Brewing open by the way, I really appreciate it."

"The King of the continent was just murdered." Kaku interrupted Wumbo. The two didn't notice him sitting there even though he was in the bar the whole time.

"Yeah." Wumbo nodded.

"The King was just murdered," Kaku restated, adding, "and the government has brainwashed the outsiders into thinking that we're a bunch of violent beasts. Their leader was killed as soon as he entered our territory. It was obviously set up, and now they're going to start pushing into here and fighting us. If we sit around having lame ass beer banter parties, we're gonna get shot before we can even think about using our powers. Your only takeaway from the news was the promotion for the bar."

"You're right," Spartica said after a minute of silence, "thank you for saying that, Kaku. What can we do though?"

"Anything. Anything we could ever want to do," Kaku answered, "I've been assembling a militia in case of something just like this. I came to Havok today instead of Spar Bar because I want the two of you to join. We can combine our powers to keep our freedom."

"Hmmmmmmmm," Wumbo and Spartica mused in harmony while staring at each other.

"What does your promise mean to us?" A royal guard asked, the one holding the gun.

"Yeah," Another agreed, pulling out a shotgun and pointing it at Dion's chest, "maybe we need to neutralize this threat to security."

Dion gently raised his right hand, and there was a loud static noise as both men froze and became matte red. Upon close inspection, they were trembling slightly, but almost completely immobilized by this simple motion from Dion.

"Please don't make me have to turn this into a whole thing, guys," Dion pleaded, "if I wanted to kill your powerless figurehead, I'd do it like this, not by shooting him in his blind spot."

When he undid his power, they were terrified, legs wobbling. The shotgun one was still eager to kill Dion, and hooked his finger around to the trigger when the door to the spare room they were in opened. In came Winona, whose presence was equally as paralyzing as Dion's arcane ability. That was the one power you could consider the Bulletin family of having. As if directed by destiny, anytime anyone not of royal blood was in the same room as the current holder of the throne, they would lock up in unimaginable fear and tension. That's how the guards knew Vincent was truly dead.

"Pierce, Rooke!" Winona scolded them, "To think I'd think I thought you guys thought better than that. Perhaps you're too foolish for this line of business. Dion is a well regarded gentleman of the highest honor, he's been nothing but a superb diplomat to my late brother, father, and grandfather."

"Sorry, Winona!" Pierce, the shotgun one, apologized with a bow. He immediately realized his mistake.

"You're both immediately relieved of all duties remotely related to the BRG. Forget the holidays, I'm filtering out the trash here. I want only the best." With that, Winona embodied the most fierce of Bulletin royalty since MBulletin, axing two royal guards who worked there longer than she was alive, "Now where were we, sweet Dion?"

"The part where your brother is dead and you're Queen to be," Dion answered, "we'd humbly like to request that you reinstate The PHPBB Act and withdraw the V-Force from ERBoH."

"The V-Force is conducting an investigation, Dion. Your boys are great, but we need... an unbiased investigation going on. With no PHPBB, we're within our constitution. Withdrawing them and reinstating your act are very unfortunately not on my agenda, I wish they were. Instead, the V-Force will gather preliminary information, and my soon to be W-Force will show you the wrath of a grieving sibling. Your free ride is over Dion, I'm not the fool typically found under the crown I'm getting tonight." Winona went on before leading Dion out of the room.

"I think you won't," Winona challenged Dion, "explicitly killing the successor to the throne after the predecessor is murdered in your Forum isn't exactly a smart idea. To think I praised your diplomacy to those things I dismissed earlier. Now you've got a very small Forum to protect, Dion; chit chat probably won't help much. You've got a solitary confined boss, a rookie partner, one sheriff, and five officers. We've got an army in your Forum and another one in the works. You better get some men; now flash out of here you beautiful bastard."

Dion was beyond confused but did as the Queen said and caused a bright flash of red light, sending himself to Juiz's location, whatever it may be.

---

"Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo," a young man stroked his patchy beard, "what you're telling me is we're being held in this little McPlayplace because someone died in our neighborhood last night?"

"Yes," Sam answered, "I'm sorry."

They were inside of the gold room. It was basically a super cushioned room with a shit ton of furniture, several stories underground in the Mod Watch Tower. It was the residence of Rob, the originator of all ERBoH. Due to the nature of his power, he had to be sheltered from the world, calling his shots via Dion and recently Juiz. It was also the designated evacuation spot for all intents and purposes, so it's where Sam directed the four border patrol members.

"Sane definitely doesn't realize he's onto something, but he is," another patrol member responded to Sane's question, "Why is this 'McPlayplace' here? Is it a good use of tax money?"

"Oh my god, shut the fuck up, Lawlzor." Another one begged, "The real question is: who is the old dude staring at us on the couch over there?"

"Turtle! Lawlzor! Sane! Compose yourselves!" The fourth one shouted, "We all know Sam ain't an Executive, he's just taking orders. Quit askin' him these ridiculous questions... I have one though, if I may: why are the people entrusted to protect the border evacuated when there's quite possibly a major security threat on the border?"

"Bantha," Sam started, "that is... a very, very good question. Uhhhhhhhhh... I honestly think Dion didn't think that fully through; but I can't go against his order."

"I can though," the old man spoke, "I'm Rob by the way, Turtle. Sort of the reason you exist at all, but no biggie. Sam, consider yourself a dual sheriff and border patrol, you're joining these guys back at Yuarelle."

"Rob!" Sam groaned under his breath, "You're not supposed to worry about our conflicts, remember?"

"I don't fucking care; this is my country, therefore this is my game we're playing here," Rob decided, "back to Yuarelle."

---

There is border patrol, a growing militia, moderators, and executives; will they be enough to deal with the monstrous WBulletin?

All of these are factors of The Forum Conspiracy.

What lies ahead?

Last edited by Ludwig; 12-14-2018 at 05:36 PM.

Hey, I'm Ludwig, and I'm a former Global Moderator! Always here to talk! If you haven't already, register an account!

Anyone who doesn't watch Duck Dynasty clearly isn't keeping up with the modern world!

[9:30:38 PM] MaNCHA: Oh, Sambama
If only there were someone out there who loved you.
*MaNCHA removed Sambama from this conversation.*

Originally Posted by Sambama

Technology's pretty incredible nowadays, you can like fuck robots and shit

Originally Posted by ERBoH

All Praise Tom "The Great" Hawk, doing great things with his greatness.

Originally Posted by The Mad Hatter

"Yo Taylor, wanna see my family TREE?"

"You mean OUR family tree,"

"I was talkin' 'bout my dick, yo,"

"Oh."

Originally Posted by Dion, regarding my depiction of Mega Cocojoe

I think my lung just collapsed again.

Originally Posted by HeroSamuel

Originally Posted by Wumbo

"Um... I want to ask you something.." ASK ME SHAUNA ASK ME

'Did you know that 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance?''

Originally Posted by HeroSamuel

Originally Posted by Phallicus Wumberius, rapping about The Room

ARRRR THE ROOM'S PRODUCTION COST EARNED YOUR CONDEMNATION
BUT I'LL SINK YOU LIKE YOUR HARSH REVIEW EVASION
AND THROW YOU OVERBOARD LIKE THAT FILM ABOMINATION
SO PREPARE TO LEARN THE FILM VAULT COMBINATION

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rahps so lean call me the tahwer of peesa
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Wumbo sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Wumbo roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Originally Posted by Yackerz

Wumbo's so good looking, his looks kill. But it's not murder... It's genocide