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Smash Hello Kitty’s Face into Every Meal

Food, eh? Been there, done that. Isn’t it about time we just turn our meals into a quick, easy pocket of nutrients that we can just shove into our gobs and keep going? I refer, of course, to sandwiches. Why have grilled salmon when you can have a grilled salmon sandwich? Meatloaf? Meatloaf sandwich! Scrambled eggs? Scrambled egg sandwich! Big, juicy steak? Big, juicy steak sandwich! Spaghetti and meatballs? Spaghetti and- er, maybe you should keep a bowl on hand for that one.

Now that we’ve make mealtime much more manageable, wouldn’t if be great to have a gadget that purrfectly prepares pockets of protein? Worry not, friends! As luck would have it, the overworked, ever-insane marketing boys in Sanrio’s tech labs have just just the thing. Now available with compliments from the cute factory comes the Hello Kitty Sandwich Maker. It looks like Hello Kitty AND makes your sandwich look like Hello Kitty! Just crack open Kitty’s skull, stuff your square shaped Wonder of a meal inside, push down really hard for several minutes, and BLAMMO! A yummy meal compressed into a charred lump of bread! Brilliant!

JxG1991 calls it “Perfectly serviceable for a decent price.” Oborochann screams “Awful!” and complains that the machine squeezes all the cheese out of the sandwiches, a claim verified by Kevin M Albeck’s testimonial: “The first couple sandwiches ended up with no cheese in them because it ran out all over the machine.” Delicious AND helps you loose weight! Finally, hallegirl and Hello Kitty Fan agree that the machine doesn’t actually do a very good job at branding the cute cat character’s face into the bread. But that’s probably user error! What would you expect from someone posting as “Hello Kitty Fan” who just bought a machine to make sandwiches?