Hmm… I don’t know, I think I still prefer the Newport State Of Mind parody to the original. Not bad, though.

Dirtee Cash sounds like a straight-up remix of The Adventures of Stevie V’s Dirty Cash, just with Dizzee Rascal’s vocals added on top. I kid you not, if you took Mr Rascal off this song it would sound like an alternative mix of Dirty Cash from 1990. Do you know something, I like this one. Pitbull, meanwhile, repurposes the Nightcrawlers’ Push The Feeling On and Sugarhill Gang’s Rapper’s Delight… not for the better, it has to be said. Pitbull’s definitely having fun, it’s just a shame it hasn’t been transmitted to the rest of the song. Sweet Disposition’s an odd one – it’s almost as though somebody’s noticed that U2’s latest album has performed badly (lead single Get On Your Boots stalled at No.12) and decided that somebody needs to put a U2-esque song into the upper reaches of the chart in order to maintain continuity.

If New Order had written Crystal slightly differently or even given it to someone with poppier sensibilities, it could easily have ended up as Forever Is Over. Believe it or not, that’s me being nice about the song. Oopsy Daisy’s a better song than the title suggests, but to be honest it didn’t really have any choice.

Haven’t Met You Yet is an unashamedly happy song. Good-o. Also, Bodies is a decent latter-day Robbie Williams single. Yep, he’s still capable of such things. Something about Bad Boys leaves me cold though, and I don’t know what it is. The singing’s good, the tune’s OK, but… actually I think it’s the presence of Flo Rida. It’s not his fault, it could’ve been anyone in his place, but I can’t help wondering if somebody at Ms Burke’s record label decided the best way for her to break America was to team her up with somebody who was already big over there. The pairing feels a bit… well, forced to me.

I Got Soul is an extensive reworking of the Killers’ All These Things That I’ve Done, sung by a collective of all sorts of famous pop stars… and V.V. Brown… and, er, Bashy… and revolving around the “I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier” refrain. Having heard far more than my fair share of charity singles sung by collectives, I can honestly say that this is one of the better examples of the genre. Million Dollar Bill’s not bad either, it’s an agreeable helping of old school soul, but Fight For This Love… well, I suppose it could turn out OK when they finally get around to finishing it.