June 1, 2005

O'Pair, The "More Socially Acceptable" Alternative To Child Leashing

You'd think that, what with Army mom Lynndie England's massive product shot, there's never been a greater awareness of the versatility of leashing. So I was a little shocked to see O'Pair described as "a more socially acceptable and safe alternative to a child's leash or harness." Apparently there are a few child leashing critics out there, sourpusses who just don't love children.

Well, no freedom-loving American will be able to resist the innovative appeal of O'Pair, which adapts the high-tech, waist-based tethering solutions developed for glacier hiking and high-volume inmate transfer and makes it suitable for use in child proximity management situations.

Their secret? Plushie fanny packs. Because wearing melon-sized, neon-colored fanny packs in the shape of no-name character heads is socially acceptable if both the parent and the child get to do it.