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In this pilot episode, the man himself recalls the time he accidentally brought weed into Texas and the subsequent mission to replenish his supply.

“High Stories,” is an animated storytelling series focusing on people’s craziest, wildest, most unbelievable cannabis-related stories. These epic tales focus on encounters with celebrities, run-ins with the law, and general absurdity derived from ingesting some mind-elevating herbs and substances.

Everyone has a crazy story they’re “high-on,” but not everyone has a crazy high story.

Welcome to the show people. We’re glad you’ve arrived for story time.

@PaulsEgo Remembers Buying Weed in Texas

I started telling some funny weed stories a while back, and one of them was about buying weed in Texas. More specifically, marijuana and Texas. I inadvertently, accidentally, kind-of crossed the border with a bunch of weed.

So anyway, long story short: that weed eventually ran out. And I went about my business of sourcing another dude to get weed from. Because that’s what you do when you live in a place that doesn’t have legal weed. You find a guy, who knows a guy, and then you have a guy.

So I went about doing that, and I found a guy, and I won’t use his real name even though I remember it, so let’s just say his name was “Chang Wang.”

So I get this phone call and I pick it up and he’s like,

Chang Wang: “Hey Man it’s Chang Wang!”

And I was like…

Paul: Cool. Hey Chang, my name’s Pau…

and he goes…

Chang Wang: Hey man! I got that loud. Whatup man? Whatup? Do you want that loud?

And I was like…

Paul: uh I don’t know what loud is sir but…maybe?

Then he’s like..,

Chang Wang: What!? You don’t know what loud is?

I had no f**** clue what “loud” was…but anyway I find out it was weed and so he goes.

Chang Wang: Alright man, meet me the Chuckey Cheese at this address in about 20-30 minutes.

And I was like…

Paul: Uhhhhh the Chucky Cheese?

Chang Wang: Ya just park in the parking lot…at the Chucky Cheese.

I was like…(sigh)…f*** me.

The Journey to the Chuckey Cheese

So this is where funny weed stories get amplified. This Chucky Cheese is about 15-20 minutes away from my house and I am sweating f**** bullets. Thinking that I’ve been gaffled up in some sort of Texas police sting. I’m already clammed up. It’s weird, I’ve never met this dude. I know nothing really about the dude that hooked me up with him. Buying weed in Texas is scary enough.

So I’m really going out on a limb here. I get there, and I pull up. Next, I send Chang Wang message. I say, “hey Chang Wang, I’m here.”

And he’s like “alright man we’ll be there soon.” Then I take a look at the text and it says “we.”

Who is we? Who is the f*#$ else coming?

So chang pulls up in a sporty little car. And this big white dude get’s out. And Chang gets ‘s out too and hands the white dude what is very clearly my weed. Then the white dude walks over to my car and just gets in. He’s like “hey man.”

I’m like, “oh…are you Chang?” and he’s like “Nah man that’s Chang!”

So I’m like, “okay here’s the money, dude I’ve never met, can I have the weed?” And so he’s chatting me up about the weed like I want to know about it. And really all I want to do is just stash this weed and get the f*** back to my house.

and I’m like… “no, no need! It’s weed, I can smell it through the bag.” Well, he’s like “alright man, well stay upblah blah blah blah blah.” Then gets out of the car, gets back into his car and he and Chang pull away. Buying weed in Texas completed and its not even a part of funny weed stories yet And then I get on my phone to text Ashley, “hey everything went fine I’m on my way home.”

Then I start my car and look in the rearview mirror as I usually do when I pull out of a parking space. And I shit you not. San Antonio PD. And he’s parked right behind me.

His car is lengthwise across the back of my car and he’s just sitting there. I’m thinking, great I’m going to jail, IN TEXAS, of all places. I’m going to get but-raped in a San Antonio county jail.

So this dude’s back there and I see him looking and eventually, he pulls off and I’m like, “Oh thank god.”

In fact, instead of going the direction that he’s going, I go the other direction, I’m like f*** it I’m going to take go up and around the long way out of this parking lot and shake this cop.

The only way out of this parking lot is one way. And I pull up at the exact same time as the cop. So I’m like alright officer, I actually made the motion.

I was like go ahead sir, I know you have business to attend to and he just sat there. I waited about 3 or 4 or 5 uncomfortable seconds and I pulled out, and he immediately pulled up behind me. And I was like fuck it, I’m going to jail.

Alright, let’s do this. Let’s get busted for weed in Texas.

I pull onto the frontage road, and he pulls in behind me. He’s all close, I can tell he’s calling my plates in. So I drove 3/4 of a mile, and all of a sudden he lights up his lights. I hear the WOOP WOOP! An instead of staying behind me, he pulls up right beside me. Does the wailer one more time, revs his engine…

and then just peels out and leaves.

So basically, for anybody who is wondering why a cop would do such a thing. Basically, the message I got, was you have to realize I had just moved to San Antonio and I had California license plates. And basically, what the Texas guy was saying was.

“Alright California, I ran your plates. They came back clean, you don’t have any priors for drugs or anything else. But next time I catch you buying a weed in the Chuckey Cheese parking lot your white privilege ain’t going to save you, boy!”

Now am I wrong in that estimation?

We hoped you enjoyed the story about buying weed in Texas. Looking for more funny weed stories? Stay tuned.