Feb 11 Taxidermy without the ick factor

Meet Robert, a simple guy with simple needs, always up for a good time and knows his way around high-powered tools.

While I find the thought of taxidermy way too creepy and haunting, he always fancied himself as a guy that could pull off a stag head on his wall, not to mention, he can totally work flannel like no other ;p. So, on a somewhat recent trip to the states, the dream became a new reality.

It was on the New York leg of Robert’s trip that he came across taxidermy, taxidermy that belonged on his wall, matching perfectly with his cherished blanket bought in Morocco many moons before. Quickly scheming in his head all the ways to possibly smuggle it through customs, it wasn’t long before he left the delusional notion behind, after all, he didn’t fancy being strip searched from an all too eager customs official.

Carrying on shopping for Christmas presents, navigating through blizzards and begging for sympathy from his tired feet, it was in a random store that the gift he was most certainly gifting himself with was spotted. Cardboard Safari (www.cardboardsafari.com), cardboard animals that come in flat packs to assemble yourself in around A4 scale, perfect for the suitcase and designed like taxidermy, there it was a nice compromise all for himself.

Back in Australia, after he started to assemble it, he came to the realisation that its not exactly durable should he need to disassemble and reassemble during any potential house moves. After a quick analysation, engineering and woodwork skills ticking over, it was decided to that he would increase the scale by 225%; photocopying the pieces (to become his new pattern) and use a stronger material.

Weaving around Bunnings like he owned the joint and me practically running to keep up, and oh so conveniently his carrying assistant, 3mm ply wood was chosen to construct his own version. A bandsaw was used to cut out the pieces and a dark furniture varnish used to stain and coat it. The deer was mounted using picture hooks, with the total weight being 4.8kgs. As much as this prototype was complete it fell and the apex of the antlers sheared, so it was reconstructed increasing the stability/durability.

Project taxidermy now perfected; decked out in an Abercrombie & Fitch flannel and a cold Stone & Wood Ale in one hand, time to sit back and admire his master piece… ahhhhhh Cheers Mate!

Note:

- Cardboard safari does some awesome stuff and not just animals, but postage to Australia is a bitch.

- This is a labour intensive and time-consuming project, and do not operate heavy machinery inexperienced or without protective gear.