The first day of school is behind us. This year no one in this house had any firsts. It wasn’t the first day of kindergarten that kept me up and tore me up for so many nights. It wasn’t the first day of middle school (that comes next year) that had me worried as an 11-year-old. Would I know where to go? Would I know anyone? After three hours, did I settle on the right outfit to wear the next day?

This year my son and daughter seem pretty settled into routine right away as third and fifth graders, but as a mom I still lie awake at night and think of all the firsts that await them.

In no particular order, the first…

Big fight with a friend

Bra

Crush

Bad fashion choice

Time getting in trouble at school

Bra strap getting snapped by the boy sitting behind you

Big decision

Bad grade on a report card

Broken bone

Kiss

Time shaving

Thoughts of a career path

Time trying to find a place to sit in the lunchroom

Dance

Time you feel very alone

Time someone offers you drugs

Attempt at asking someone on a date

Time you feel ashamed

Trip away from home without your parents

Boyfriend or girlfriend

Breakup

Heartbreak

Time you defy your parents

Book that makes you cry

Party

Teacher you hate

Cigarette

Alcohol

Boss you hate

Job you love

Time driving a car

Wreck

Ticket

Time the cops bring you home

College acceptance letter

Time leaving home

Time flunking a class

Time making your parents proud

Failure

Time you tried to overcome a fear

Time you were a coward

True love

Real job

Time trying to make conversation and a friend at work

Time trying to find someone to sit with at lunch

Marriage

Big fight

Ruined dinner

Child…

And I think everything is a first with kids. The cycle begins again.

What others can you think of? (And share your story.) These were all firsts of mine. Let me know which ones you most want to hear the backstory about and I’ll write a future post about the most requested ones.

37 responses to “Firsts”

This school year was our first school sports team tryout. My daughter is not the athletic type. I was surprised when she popped up and said she was interested in volleyball. For a year she has learned the game. While she has not been as great as the other girls at serving, she sure has tried and practiced her heart out. This year, as a 7th grader, she tried out for the volleyball team at school – the first time she has tried out for anything. For three afternoons this week after school, she tried out for the team. She worked every evening after tryouts to improve her technique and each morning before school. She sure gave it her best. When she and her dad pulled into the driveway yesterday, I could tell by her face that she did not make it. She got out and very grown-up, but disappointed announced that she did not make the team. I told her I was proud that she tried and did not give up. ** (Would love to hear the story about your first trip away without your parents.)

For me I worry about those scary first.. the first time they are offered drugs, the first time sex is made available for them… I just pray I taught them well. I think as mom’s we always think of everything and then more.. it’s our curse along with childbirth.. 😉

That’s a tough one. I can definitely think of times when people were prejudiced against me because of the color of my skin and what they thought I represented. It was scary and made me mad and I truly wondered if I would come home in one piece sometimes. It’s not a bad experience to have had. Surprisingly it made me feel very compassionate toward other races, not full of hate. Though I have to admit I still don’t like one certain girl in particular. 😉

I always thought getting through that stuff as a kid was the hard part, whew, now I’m through it. Seeing your kids go through stuff is tough. But I’ve learned to step back, quietly worry (a lot), and advise when necessary. They’ll figure it out just like I did. And they’re not going to do it my way anyway. I find myself saying all the time, “I went through this and survived, they can too.”

Those are tough and it still feels funny when one of my kids isn’t sleeping in his or her bed. Just doesn’t feel like all is complete. My son went on an overnight field trip without me last year. That was rough. So I have that to look forward to with my daughter.

When I was five, I had my first boyfriend, kiss AND breakup. I forget how, but we started DATING during recess, we kissed multiple times, and one day, we jumped over one kid to see who could jump farther. Our teacher said, “No running during DEAR time!”, and for some reason, I decided to break up with him. XD I know. “WTF”, right?

This list right here reminds me that having kids is a non-stop worry fest haha. It doesn’t stop when they’re out of infancy, and in fact I heard that teenagers need even more parental time than the younger years. My heart breaks just reading through all that we’ve gone through and all our kids still have to go through!

I remember keeping a lot to myself as a teenager but maybe the worry is multiplied for parents. I think for me it would be. I know my kids’ problems are so much deeper now. They’re not things that can always be solved. Sometimes I just have to be there and be a shoulder, and that’s hard when I really just want to cry too!

Love your blog. Love the post…currently I have a son in grade 2 and two girls at home. My son is way more confident than I ever was as a kid but I’ve always feared him being bullied and the toll it would take on his self esteem if it were to happen. Although I religiously straighten my hair now, in grade school it was big and puffy and curly. The boys in my class would needlessly make fun of it and would hold com

Now that is a story I have never heard! I always tell my son to be nice to the girls, but part of me thinks he is going to be one of the boys who pulls bra straps. I don’t know. Maybe he’ll just be one who giggles when others do it. I bet your hair was beautiful.

It’s so hard to think of our kids going through the same things we did, but I try to tell myself “I got through it,” “I got through it.” They will too and they will learn about themselves. I know I did.

First day of college…As I entered the classroom for the first time in many years, at the age of 40, I was a complete nervous wreck. I felt like I was entering Jr. High all over again. Butterflies, sweaty palms, heart racing…. Made me think, “What am I doing here?”