So here continuing from the last post where I began walking the Self Forgiveness on the EnergyRelationships I’d formed toward the Thought, Imagination and Backchat Dimensions:Imagination Energy-Relationship Self Forgiveness continued:I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within/as the imagination in imagining scenarios in which I can possibly avoid going through with the interaction with the person, where I in my mind try to come up with possible excuses/reasons/justifications that might ‘get me out’ of the situation, and within this not considering/seeing realizing how what is it that I am actually trying to avoid is not the meeting/interacting with another in itself, but is the fears of how I think I’m going to experience myself when/while interacting with them, as the thought that they maybe ‘will not like me’ and thus will ‘treat me mean’ in which case I would experience myself negatively, and thus it’s that negative experience that my mind has projected within a thought as an image in my mind as to how I’ll apparently experience myself in the actual situation, and thus what it is I am actually trying to avoid is that thought actually manifesting, but the only actual way to do that is to stop participating in the thought.I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize how I’ve manipulated myself by becoming my imagination and to become the energy-experience of relief when imagining myself having some excuse to get out of the situation, where I picture myself getting to rather spend my time not having to face this meeting/interaction with another, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect the feeling of relief to the imagination of ‘not having to interact with another’ and within this to not consider how I am sabotaging myself and my expression in my world and my communication and interaction with all the beings that I face in my world.I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize/consider that changing my experience within my mind from/between positive/negative energy-experiences does nothing to change my actual reality, and that instead of actually changing here for real as who I am and what/how I’m living in actual reality, that I’m busy wasting time in my mind changing between states of energy-experience and thus not doing anything to change my actual situation/reality/living but allowing myself to be caught up in my mind in a rollercoaster, back-and-forth of emotion/feeling reaction experiences.Backchat Energy-Relationship Self Forgiveness:I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take it even further where after the imagination dimension is activated, then going on to have a conversation with myself within myself in relation to the thought/imagination dimensions, where in response to the scenes I played out within my imagination, and the energy-experience of anxiety, I then participated in conversation toward that within the backchat “I really wish I didn’t have to face this person right now”, within that not realizing/seeing how I was in fact manipulating myself through voicing these words within myself, and further validating the thoughts, imagination, and reactions that came up in me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize/see how I have allowed myself to utilize images, words, and memories as/within thoughts, imagination, and backchat and with connecting energy-experiences to them, to define who I am in my living, instead of me living words in self awareness and thus being an actual living being here in reality, instead of going into an alternate reality in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/understand how I’ve been creating myself as my mind as energy-experiences by accepting and allowing myself to participate in words and representations of words within my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize how when I participated in the backchat “I really wish I didn’t have to face this person right now”, that I was actually in the process of creating me as the experience presented in my thoughts and imagination as the energy-experience of anxiety, instead of in that moment remaining here as breath and actually moving myself to follow through with the meeting/interaction.

Reaction Self Forgiveness:I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define who I am as the energy-experiences that I experience as reactions to the thoughts, imagination, and backchat that comes up within me, and to not even question if that is who I really am, and why do I have these experiences going on inside of me which are separate from me here as the physical. Why am I not simply experiencing myself here as the physical as my physical human body, and why am I trusting in these feelings/emotions that I don’t even know where they have come from or how they were created, as I did not create them myself in awareness, where I said ‘ok, I’m going to experience this now’, but no, they ‘sprang up’ from ‘somewhere else’ and then I immediately go and trust these feeling/emotion/energetic-experiences as if they are who I am when I don’t even know where they came from.In the next post I’ll continue with the Self Forgiveness on the Reaction/Experiences of the Validation Character and then will walk the Self Commitment Statements in relation to the points I’ve walked Self Forgiveness thus far.