10 Things I learned When I Was at My Lowest

July 31, 2010

As many of you already know I have been hiding out for a week and attending to my wife and little princess after a routine ultrasound on 7/22/10 revealed that my son no longer had a heart beat. We as a family just needed some time to reflect and heal. Today is 7/30/10 and I am writing you this post from Starbucks in Henderson, Nevada. It’s 6:30am and I just got done working out with my friend Justin Blum (one of the top trainers in Las Vegas Area) As a matter of fact if you are in Las Vegas you should definitely call Justin for a workout. He kicked my A** all week. Justin’s phone number is 702-882-6871

Here are 10 Things I learned from this experience:
1. God always has the Master plan. Even though sometimes we don’t understand why some things happen. We can rest assured there is always a reason and only God knows the reason.

2. Society encourages us (especially men) to keep our feelings to ourselves and not talk about our problems and feelings to other people. I am here to tell you that, “That is bulls***.” Communication is the cornerstone of being a human. By communicating we reach out to the universe and get advise and feedback from others that can help us in time of need. All of you reading this post helped me tremendously in my time of need and I want to THANK YOU.

3. When you put yourself out there and ask for help you also open yourself up for criticism. That’s just a fact of life. It’s no different than when you play sports in front of a crowd. Someone always finds something to say about you. If Kobe Bryant has one bad night he will get criticized by a bunch of people who couldn’t make a basket if their life depended on it.

4. Some people are just skeptics and that’s just the way it is. They always think that there is a “hidden agenda” in everything. (my wife used to be like that). I can’t say that I blame them for being like that. In this day and age people are being manipulated on a daily basis and I can see why they think the way they do.

5. You can’t please everybody. If you try to please everybody then you won’t please no body. I mean look at some of the greatest leaders in the world. No matter how great they were, there were always a few who criticized them. Here are some examples: John Kennedy, Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
(OK that last one was to see if you are paying attention, lol, I like Jay Leno’s name for him he calls him Ahmadi “nut job”.) I am slowly getting my sense of humor back.

6. They say that if you have one true friend then you are already ahead of most people. I feel so blessed because I feel like I have over 700 true friends who commented and were there for me in time of need. Every comment felt like a huge hug and I THANK YOU.

7. Some people love you and some people don’t that’s just the way it is. Be yourself and don’t change for anyone. People can always tell a “fake” person vs “genuine” person. Being yourself means that from time to time you are going to pi** somebody off but that’s way better than trying to be someone that you’re not and coming off as a “fake”. Always keep it REAL.

8. When going through tough times don’t sit home and throw a pity party. It’s not healthy at all. I did that for a couple of days and found that I had a terrible attitude towards life and others. Instead I recommend empowerment activities such as yes you guessed it working out, reading, spending time with loved ones and just getting out of the house.

9. When you hurt your emotions become ultra “sensitive” and might prevent you from thinking too clearly. Never act or make decisions when you are in that “state of mind”. It’s OK to ask others for their opinion to guide you through when you are not thinking clearly.

10. As humans we all make mistakes from time to time and make the wrong judgements. If someone makes a mistake and hurts you simply forgive them and move on.

Especially if they “man up” and apologize. No one is perfect and we ALL have made poor judgements. The key is learning from our mistakes and improve ourselves.
Speaking of forgiveness I forgive Isiah B for the comment he made and accept his apology. He showed a lot of character for admitting his wrong and apologizing.See Below

Isiah B @ 7:47 pm

Saman,

I was just trying to get a rise. You let a complete stranger do that. 19 years old at that. Shows you how vulnerable a person can be in heartace. Saman Bakhitar. I’ve been a complete fool. I sincerely ask for forgiveness from the bottom of my heart. I can’t believe I’d tested myself like this. You don’t deserve this. Please forgive me. And god bless your family.

I hope no one ever goes through what I went through. I am not going to lie I am/was so hurt by your comments.
I absolutely love kids. As a matter of fact looking and playing with my little one year old daughter is the only thing that kept me together this week.
One day when God blesses you with children and you hold your child it will completely change your life forever.
I don’t hold a grudge against you as I am not perfect myself. All we can do as humans is learn from our mistakes.
I thank you for apologizing and I accept your apology. May God Bless you and your family.

Please share with me by leaving a comment below on:

1) What did you learn when you went through your toughest times in life?

2) Any words of wisdom for Isiah? How can we help him excel in his young life?