The rantings of an ultra conservative Christian, who is constantly being put in my place by the "Big Guy". A wife, and mother of 4 who is rapidly approaching 30. Lover of shopping, chocolate, worship, and rocking the boat. Passionately wanting to follow God, wherever he leads me, but taking regular side roads, and experiencing my fair share of grace.
"Some people have to learn the hard way, and I'm the type of guy (gal) that has to find out for myself." ~DC Talk

Thursday, July 31, 2008

The following post is a response to what my friend Rachelle wrote. Have you ever started to write a comment and 30 minutes later you are 1/2 way through a mini novel? Yeah, that's why I put it over here instead. Go check out her post first!

Public school for us has been a HUGE positive. I can honestly say, I LOVE my kids school. I am SO glad I listened to God and not my own fears and sent them to PS. It took me nearly a year to let my guard down enough really appreciate the positives though. At first, all I could do was search for the ways it was ruining my kids. All those years of homeschooling had conditioned me to think it was an evil government institution, ready to ruin my children. What I didn't count on was that real living people actually worked there.

There are great kids in the public schools! Oh and yes there are the bad ones, but once you stop fearing "the bad kids" and spend a moment to get to know them, they are just scared and often unloved kids, FULL of God's potential!

I disagree that public school can't be in God's plan for our families. I KNOW his plan contains both public school AND homeschool. I also know we are called to be a light unto the world.

As parents it is our responsibility to educate our children in the way of God. Oh but the lessons they are learning now about God, the lost, and love FAR surpass those I taught them in the safe confines of our homeschool bubble.

My 12 year old daughter has brought 7 unsaved kids to youth group... four of which have become regular attenders, three of them saved. I have no doubt we are well within God's plan.

My kids have learned bad words, heard s*xual comments, been told about evolution, heard the cries of neglected classmates, seen the anger in the fatherless.... They have been teased and had their feelings hurt. With all that we are still VERY happy with PS.

My children have made GOOD friends, but still love the hurting. They are learning to love those who hurt them. They are learning you don't have to agree with the authority, but you do have to respect their position. Even my 5 year old is capable of learning these things and acting as a light to his classroom. Oh, and here is the shocker.. my kids are learning academics! Yes, it's true! The public school can and does teach my children! While my kids are advanced in many areas, they don't know it all, nor do I. Everyone had different gifts. I actually attended my 10 year old's science class on Wednesday's last year, and learned right along with my daughter. Also, my children were far more motivated to do a good job on reports, assignments, etc, because they were publicly recocnized by the school and classmates for a job well done. That was HUGE for us.

Now I say all these things not to say that homeschool is in any way inferior to Public Schooling. It's not, and in some ways it is better. Yet the point here is that there are MANY positives in public school. Your kids CAN thrive... just like in homeschool, they CAN fail. It's all about GOD'S will and purpose for your family.

I spent years miserable in homeschooling, because I inncorectly beleived it was God's ONLY way. I personally beleive if homeschooling is NOT going well for several seasons... I'm not just talking one or two bad months here, but consistently... that you should prayerfully seek a different direction. You MAY be missing out on your family's purpose.

Our kids success has far less to do with where they go to school (or don't), but where they come home to. My kids come home to loving parents who love them AND the Lord with all of our hearts. We are involved, and CONTINUE to teach them what we know. We are nowhere near perfect.. but we know a lot about grace... Public school hasn't changed any of that. If anything, it's made us stronger. ~Karlie

21. Any new and exciting news you'd like share? I'm going to get a job!

22. What did you want to be when you were little? A princess

23. How old are you today? 31

24. What is your favorite flower? Rose. Mr. Lincoln is my favorite

25. What day on the calendar are you looking forward to? My kids first day of school, but only because THEY are looking forward to it. I'm not the one of those moms who can't wait to unload their kids, well, maybe my 12 year old... but just sometimes ( ;

26. What are you listening to right now? Birds

27. What was the last thing you ate? Do I have to confess? A smores cookie last night before bed.

28. Do you wish on stars? Not for a long time

29. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? This is a dumb question

30. How is the weather right now? Sunny and cool

31. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My mom

32. Favorite soft drink? Coke, in a bottle

33. Favorite restaurant? The Cheese Cake Factory

34. Hair color? Dark Brown

35. What was your favorite toy as a child? Barbies

36. Summer or Winter? Spring and Fall

37.What is in your trunk right now? Sheep feed, towels from swimming, lego pieces, maybe a french fry or two...

38. Chocolate or Vanilla? Chocolate, unless it's cake, then it's vanilla all the way

39. Coffee or tea? Both

40. When was the last time you cried? Sunday

41. What is under your bed? No comment

42. What did you do last night? Baked cookies, and helped my girl;s work on their 4-H projects

Monday, July 21, 2008

Christ's blood can cover all sins... except one. Not tithing to the church. Did you know that. See, I didn't, but lucky me, I was enlightened last Sunday by a special speaker (that my tithe money brought in, money well spent, don't you think?).

He was a funny Southern man who was charming, made me laugh, and had great claims about his abilities to save well over 200 souls a year. So his claims seemed light hearted, but in reality, the guy was screwy, and legalistic, and lets not forget... totally full of himself. OK Karlie.... maybe the LAST comment was uncalled for, but I'm pissed... and lashing out a bit.

So what exactly did he say? Well, he said that there are no thieves in heaven, so obviously you can't get into heaven if you are not tithing, because you are stealing from God. I couldn't fail but notice that this man was fat. Hmmm, are there gluttons in heaven? So, if it is indeed a sin to not tithe (which personally, I do not think it is) then why can't Christ's blood cover it like the murder, adultery, etc?

Oh, but this sermon kept getting better! This man went on to say that if you don't attend church on Sunday nights, you might as well not attend Sunday morning, because the church only needs "devoted" people. Whatever. I think my Sunday nights are better spent with my family, or fellowship. Heck, I'd be all over Sunday night small groups, but the church refuses (so as not to compete with the empty seats at the 5:00 service).

This speaker was surprisingly speaking on evangelizing. All I could think was "I'm so glad I didn't bring a guest this morning". "Welcome to our church... all we require for you to join us in heaven is 10% of your income and every Sunday night and morning... otherwise you are a thief and not devoted enough to be one of us, and you can just rot in hell". That's gonna win LOTS of souls.

The thing that scared me was all the Amen's coming from the pastor and his wife as this man spoke. As I was praying during worship (before the speaker) God kept telling me that he just wanted me to delight in him. DELIGHT IN HIM! He didn't give me a long list of demands.... a level of performance he wanted me to achieve. I feel closest to him when I just love him. Ugh... I'm so sick of the churches standards! I want to follow Christ!

I must tell you, that the time I was most blessed financially was when we chose to give our tithe to the body... not the church. Each month we would pray over where to put our tithe, and each month, We'd watch miracles happen. GOD was in control of our money. We got to be an active part of the process, and it was beautiful. Now I think it's the responsibility of the body to make sure the pastor is WELL taken care of, that the church has enough money to keep lights on, etc, but since when is the church a building??? Isn't it the body? Just a thought. My church does not take care of the body, just the building, and the special speakers, and lots of fake flower arrangements. Somehow, I just don't think that's what God intended.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Why do I even bother? Every time I go to the doctors, they just piss me off. $150 bucks got me a 10 minute visit with a doctor who cared less about the cause, than he did about sticking me on drugs. He basically said "you've got migraines, here take this drug that will cause you to be dizzy, tired, nauseated, moody, can cause severe liver disease, and maybe death!" Oh yeah! Liver disease and DEATH! Boy, that's WAY better than a headache.

So I sit here contemplating my new over advertised brand name meds. Headache relief... or death? Oh I just LOVE the drug industry! They make liver disease look good in comparison to a headache (how do they pull that off?). Hmm, I wonder if Obama hired the same advertising company? How many idiotic things will we Americans fall for?

My girls are doing sheep for 4-H this year, and the thing that amazes us is how absolutely dumb they are. They get confused walking to their own barn. They seem to live solely to appease their own comforts, They follow each other into barb wire (all for the sake of a good snack), they can't seem to figure out how to get the poop off their butts. It isn't lost on me that God compares us to sheep. We are so easily led astray. We live to serve our own flesh, we get lost.. A LOT. We are easily deceived.

In my headache fog, this post probably makes sense to no one but me, but in my semi enlightened state, I will choose today to make a stand.

No overpriced meds from my high priced drug pusher will cross my lips.

No media brain washing television will make me fall for America's left wing pretty boy.

Today I could care less what Brittany Spears is doing, or what Oprah thinks.

Today I'm going to have pride in my stay at home mom, housewife job!

I think I'll skip the newspaper that paints my God as a mythological bigot, and let my Bible be my guide instead.

I'm gonna like George Bush even though that makes me SO uncool.

I'm going to believe what my military friends say over what the news feeds me ... and support this war.

Hmm, maybe today I'll just think for myself. WOW... am I aloud to do that? Today I will choose NOT to be "enlightened", but pray for wisdom instead.

My path IS narrow.

There is only ONE way to heaven.

The media does NOT have my best interest in mind.

God LOVES sheep.

~Karlie

Politically "Uncorrect"

I'm for the low man on the totem poleAnd I'm for the underdog god bless his soulAnd I'm for the guys still pulling third shiftand the single mom raising her kidsAnd I'm for the preacher who stay on their kneesAnd I'm for the sinner who finally believedAnd I'm For the farmer with dirt on his handsAnd the soldiers who fight for this land

And I'm for the bibleAnd I'm for the flagAnd I'm for the working man Me and Ol' hagI'm just one of many who can't get no respectPolitically Uncorrect

I guess my opinion is all out of styleDon't get me started because i can get wildAnd I'll make a fight for the four father's plan (That's Right)Hell the world already knows where I stand

And I'm for the bibleAnd I'm for the flagAnd I'm for the working man Me and Ol' hagI'm just one of many who can't get no respectPolitically Uncorrect

Nothing Wrong with the bibleNothing Wrong with the flagNothing Wrong with the working manMe and Ol' HagWe're just some of many that can't get no respect Politically Uncorrect

Thursday, July 10, 2008

I hate to be the kind of person who complains about aches and pains. But.... I've had this stupid headache for over a month! It just started one night, and hasn't gone away since. I've tried EVERYTHING! From large quantities of Advil, extra water, and prayer, to sinus meds, steam, and more prayer.

I despise Doctors, so I've been avoiding going, but today I gave in and made an appointment for Friday. I have no idea what is wrong with me, but I suspect it is something benign, like wisdom teeth, or eye strain. However, with the wonderful world of the Internet, I've discovered it could be caused by any and every disease known to man! You know like brain tumors or water on the brain... I bet Doctors HATE Google.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

As a little girl, I always dreamed of living in the country. I grew up in a typical suburb. Lots of concrete mixed in with man controlled landscaping and an endless view of mini vans. On a sunny day you might even be able to see the MC Donald's arches that stood at the edge of our neighborhood, providing years of happy meals and processed cheese.

My fondest childhood memories were of the times we visited my grandmother and my family's wheat farm. Wide open spaces, country roads, fresh produce, and the animals. I knew my heart had found home in this quiet "peace" of land.

A few years back my dream was finally realized when my husband moved us on to a wheat farm 20 minutes out of town. Boy, it's funny, but our hearts desires don't always turn out like we imagine.

Life in the country these last few years have been mixed with blessings and hard ships. There are nights that I sit on my front porch with a glass of lemon aid and watch the wind blow the spring wheat like seas of green. In those moments, I think I've found heaven. Then there are the days that I feel so alone, so isolated here all by myself. I love to watch my boys play in the wheat, and the girls care for their sheep in the summer, but feel trapped in the cold winter when the house seems too small for 6 people, and the icy roads keep me home.

Despite it's draw backs, we had planned on staying. The beauty and peace kept us here.

Now, as we enter into our third year of country living, we have hit an unexpected glitch in our semi utopia. GAS PRICES. When it costs $10 to get to town, it's an issue. In the month of May our gas bill was over $1000. We didn't take any trips... that was just driving the kids to school (when the bus didn't take them), Chris driving to work, kids activities, and errands.

With groceries rapidly rising, we had to take a good look at our budget and decide what gives. It came down to this. Either the kids quit all extra activities (sports, dance, etc), I stop coming to town for anything other than church and once a week groceries, and we spend all our weekends at home on the farm.... or we move.

We spent most of June couped up at home. trying to cut back on gas. Let me tell you, It was VERY hard. We did cut back on gas by $300, but honestly, I kept cheating and taking the kids to the pool, or the library.

Now, out of the blue we were approached by a family about a house just down the street from our children's school. Houses in this little community are almost impossible to come by because of the fantastic school and "Mayberry" type community. This house would be larger than what we are in now, with a huge yard, quite affordable and is right across the street from a wheat farm. The kids and I could walk to school, sports, the library, the pool, church, and friends houses. With only my husband driving to work (a 13 mile commute) we would save hundreds of dollars a month.

It sounds like a God thing. With everything clicking together like this, one would usually jump at this chance. Yet I hesitate. This little farm in the middle of nowhere has changed me.

It's toughened me up, I can wrestle sheep, capture a stray horse, climb a barb wire fence, and stare a coyote in the eye. I've learned to shoot a gun, run a well pump, grow food from seed, and drive on REALLY BAD roads.

It's helped me to find beauty in loneliness, allowed me to fall in love with the land... not just the idea of the land.

Our decision is not made.

I'm praying for wisdom.

I'm fearing the unknown.... Like neighbors.

I'm worried we'll regret it if we move.

I'm worried we'll regret it if we don't.

It's hard to leave a dream.

No this is not my house (: It's actually an abandoned school house a few miles from my home, and my favorite place to come and pray.

Husband and kiddos in the corral

Can you believe how beautiful this is! These are the REAL colors! Not computer enhanced.

You know, it's really hard to start posting again after you've been gone awhile. I mean, where do you start? Do you just jump back in? Do you write a lengthy post sharing where you have been? So much can happen, so many blog worthy thoughts can fill your mind over the span of 4 months. Has it really been that long?

My blog looks dark now. I no longer like the black background. My picture seems dated too (even though I don't look any different). I think I need a blog face lift to be re-inspired! Then maybe the thoughts in my head will flow freely into the screen again. In this busy life of mine, I long to carve out a little niche of time to start writing again, AND to start reading again! I've missed my friends!