A UK woman who was snooping through her boyfriend’s old phone “looking for some old photographs” had to know she would encounter at least one thing she wouldn’t like. But nothing could have braced her for the horror she discovered: A video of her boyfriend “having full intercourse” with someone else.

It gets worse: That “someone else” was one of her closest friends.

It gets MUCH worse: That “closest friend” was her beloved Staffordshire bull terrier.

Wayne Bryson, 19, was immediately arrested when his girlfriend took the phone to the police (presumably fighting her gag reflex the entire way). Bryson admitted to the act of sexual penetration, which broke Britain’s Sexual Offences Act. He was “unable to give any reason to the police,” though he “claimed he had not done it before.” So there’s that.

Adding to his troubles, Bryson was caught with marijuana during the arrest. But that’s probably the least of his concerns (and issues) as the dog f*cking stuff carries a maximum sentence of one to two years in prison. He’s currently out on bail on the condition that he is not allowed to be alone with animals, and will report for sentencing on March 5.