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Friday, 21 October 2005

Glamorous newscaster and friend of Matthew Wright, Kate Silverton was heading for a new controversy last night. Just weeks after falling out with fellow news reader Philip Hayton, the gaffe-prone lovely was the subject of a spate of emails from BBC Breakfast viewers all complaining of the alleged personal slant she has been giving to the programme's news coverage.

Silverton: "T-wit t-woo? Or just t-wit?"

Said one viewer, who preferred to remain nameless, "it's just birds, birds, birds with that bloody Silverton! If it isn't that poxy Avian flu pandemic, it's some heart-rending story about some rare species being on the verge of disappearing from our shores. I thought it was just me, but then she started banging on about Turkeys joining the EU and I knew the woman had finally snapped. What is it with her and her bleedin' birds?" demanded the clearly emotional viewer, twitching his litle nose and cleaning his fine long whiskers with his delicate little hands. "Anyone would think she was one herself the way she twitters on about our feathered friends continually. Now, if you'll excuse me, there's a nice looking piece of Cheddar on that piece of wood with a lethal metal springed attachment over there, and I haven't eaten in several days..."

Free range farming, China style....

Another viewer bemoaned the perceived pro-bird bias in the morning bulletins. "Why can't we have some nice stories detailing the experiences of rodents or other small mammals?" asked Mr. F.L.D. Mouse of the Cornfield, Hertfordshire. "Our lives are made grim enough as it is by owls swooping down and sweeping us off to their bloody barns without them dominating the news agenda into the bargain."

F.L.D. Mouse: "nocturnally hunted"

Kate Silverton is currently appearing as Wol in Winnie the Pooh and the Avian Flu Epidemic that Swept Western Europe Killing Millions at the Alhambra Theatre, Leicester.