Many people have written on why we are being visited
by aliens from outer space. I propose one theory; I'll call it the "Alien
Breakdown syndrome" for lack of a better term. I have a feeling our
alien friends do have an advanced technology, but that it may have a few
"bugs" in the system and that they may not be as advanced as
we would like to imagine they are. Sometimes they may be lost, tired, hungry,
or just having a breakdown on the side of the old' intergalactic highway.

I hope you don't mind my slightly irreverent look at
UFO history. I want you to remember, all the folks mentioned in these reports
were serious individuals who saw something very unusual and then took the
time to report it. All reports come from either the Magonia files or from
Project Bluebook' s 701 unknown files. Looking back I do find there are
enough facts in the records to warrant further research into the subject
of Alien Breakdowns.

First, I have a very early example of an alien breakdown
from April 12, 1897.

On April 12, 1897 near Green Ridge, Illinois, a large
crowd of miners saw an unknown object land 3 km north of Green Ridge and
4 km south of Girard. The night operator of the Chicago-and-Alton Railroad,
Paul McCramer, stated that he came sufficiently close to the craft to see
a man emerge from it to repair the machinery. Traces were found over a
large area. The object itself was elongated like a ship with a roof and
a double canopy. It left toward the north.

Another report of a breakdown April 14, 1897 just two
days later. Where's Charles Fort when you need him?

On April 14, 1897 in Gas City, Indiana, an object landed
2 km south of Gas City on the property of John Roush, terrifying the farmers
and causing the horses and cattle to stampede. Six occupants of the ship
came out and seemed to make some repairs. Before the crowd could approach
the object, it rose rapidly and flew toward the east.

And yet another report from just one day later of another
roadside repair job.AAA in Space. On April 15, 1897 in Springfield, Illinois,
two farm workers, Adolph Winkle and John Hulle, saw a strange craft in
a field. They had a discussion with its occupants, a woman and two men,
and were told the ship-had flown from Quincy to Springfield in 30 min and
that the crew was making electrical repairs.

And a week later another report, and the witness actually
made some cash money on this one.

On April 22, 1897 in Rockland, Texas, a John M. Barclay
was intrigued when his dog barked furiously and a high-pitched noise was
heard. He went out, saw a flying object circling 5 m above ground. Elongated
with protrusions and blinding lights, it went dark when it landed. Barclay
was met by a man who told him his purpose was peaceful and requested some
common hardware items to repair the craft. He paid with a ten-dollar bill
and took off "like a bullet out of a gun."

A more modern report of a roadside repair comes from
Oklahoma (my home state) notice the amount of detail in the report, even
the craft's identification number, now that's a good witness.

On March 23, 1966 in Temple, Oklahoma an electronics
instructor, who was driving to work at a local Air Force Base, observed
an object blocking the road. It was shaped like an airplane fuselage, 25
m long, with a "bubble" on top resembling the canopy on a B-26,
rested on legs, and had very bright aft and forward lights. There was a
door and a short stairway to the side of the object, and a man in coveralls
appeared to be examining the craft which bore the identification "TL
4768" When the witness approached, the "pilot" went back
inside, a sound resembling that of a high speed drill was heard, and the
object rose. No engine was observed. The witness was familiar with all
conventional military aircraft.

This time we encounter downright dumb activities by aliens
from 1897.

On April 25, 1897 in Merkel, Texas, People returning
from church observed a heavy object being dragged along the ground by a
rope attached to a flying craft. The rope got caught in a railroad track.
The craft was too high for its structure to be visible but protrusions
and a light could be distinguished. After about 10 min a man came down
along the rope cut the end free, and went back aboard the craft, which
flew away toward the northeast. The man was small and dressed in a light
blue uniform.

We come in peace; we only want your dog.

On November 6, 1957 in Everittstown, New Jersey, a John
Trasco saw a brilliant, egg-shaped object hovering in front of a barn and
was confronted with a being 1 m tall with a putty-colored face and frog-like
eyes. He thought the dwarf said in broken English: "We are peaceful
people; we only want your dog." The little man, who was dressed in
a green suit with shiny buttons, a green tam-o-shanter-like cap, and gloves
with a shiny object at the tip of each finger, fled when the witness denied
his request.

And some pancakes.

On April 18, 1961 in Eagle River, Wisconsin, a J. Simonton
heard a whining sound and saw an object, 10 m in diameter, 4 m high, with
exhaust pipes around the periphery, land near his house. A door was opened
and a man appeared. About 1.50 m tall, he wore a black, turtle-neck pullover
with a white band at the belt, and black trousers with a vertical white
band along the side. Two figures were visible inside the object. Simonton
filled a jug with water, returned it to the man, who gave him three ordinary
pancakes, and the craft took off.

And a glass of water to go please.

On June 15, 1964 in Aria, Chile, a miner, R. A. Donoso,
observed a strange machine land. From it emerged two fair skinned men who
asked for water in a language, which appeared to be a mixture of English
and Spanish. Donoso took some water from his car radiator for them and
they left. Their craft was about 3 m long and 1 m wide.

And while were on the subject of water to go.

On August 1914 in Georgian Bay, Canada, a William J.
Kiehl and seven other persons saw a spherical craft on the surface of the
water. On its deck were two small men wearing green-purple clothes. They
seemed to be busy with a hose, plunging it into the water. On the opposite
side were three men dressed in light brown, wearing square masks down to
their shoulders. Seeing the witnesses, they reentered the craft except
for one dwarf, wearing shoes with a curved, pointed tip, which remained
outside while the craft rose 3 m above the water and shot upward, leaving
a short trail

Water.. Water!!!

On July 16, 1964 in Conklin, New York a Edmund Travis,
9, Randy Travis, 7 Floyd Moore, 10, and two other boys, saw a dwarf dressed
in a black suit and a helmet, with a glass section in front of his face,
which looked human. He appeared to request some water in a strange tone,
which sounded, "as if it came from a pipe." He then walked to
a shiny machine partially hidden in the brush, as the boys ran home.

Another UFO that needed some H20 is reported on July
2, 1950 in Steep Rock Lake, Canada. A man and his wife saw a double saucer
with portholes and a rotating antenna come to rest on the surface of the
lake. Ten figures, 1.20 m tall, dressed in shiny clothing, emerged and
walked on deck like robots "changing direction without turning their
bodies." Their faces could not be seen. One of them wore a red cap,
had darker arms and legs and "seemed to be their chief." They
immersed a hose in the lake, and then took off. Fishermen later reported
a green moss forming on the lake.

Another out of water UFO with a MIB from 1952.

On July 24, 1952 in Vico, Italy, a man who was fishing
in the Serchio River saw a disk hovering for 10 min. From it hung a hose
that plunged into the water. The object was 20 m in diameter, with five
propellers in the rear and a dome with something like blades on top. An
orange glow could be seen through slits along the deck. A man wearing a
diving helmet looked at the witness through a window, and he received a
kind of electric shock as a "green ray" hit him. He looked up
with difficulty, in time to see the object fly away toward the east. Six
days later a stranger with a foreign accent contacted the witness and intimidated
him

Water Water everywhere!!!

On May 20, 1953 in Brush Creek, California, Two miners,
John Q. Black, 48, and John Van Allen, reported that an object, silvery,
2.5 m in diameter, 2 m thick, with a tripod landing gear, landed on a sand
bar 50 m away from them. An occupant described as a broad-shouldered dwarf
wearing clothing that covered the head and the trunk was also seen. His
arms and legs were covered with tweed like cloth fastened at the wrists
and ankle. He filled a shiny pail with water and handed it to someone inside
the craft. He then appeared to notice Black and jumped into the craft,
which made a hissing sound and departed

Everyone water logged? I sure am.

Have you ever notice that we have had many reports of
"UFO Crashes"? I have, and I wonder sometimes if some aliens
might need a designated driver program.

In March 1945 near Belfast, Maine a man out hunting observed
an elongated object flying very slowly, tilted toward the earth. It crashed
into some trees at the end of a clearing. The enormous craft seemed undamaged
as it rested briefly on the ground, then lifted again with a humming sound,
started to spin, released a shower of fine silvery threads, and rose straight
up, disappearing in seconds.

I think this is the only report I have seen of a UFO
doing a loop; I just wonder what he was on.

On October 12, 1954 in Sainte-Marie d'Herblay, France,
a Gilbert Lelay, 13, saw a phosphorescent cigar in a pasture and a man
near it, wearing a gray suit, boots, and a gray hat. He held a flashing
sphere and told Gilbert in French not to touch it. He went back inside
the craft, which flew in loops and vanished.

Here's another bad driver report from 1952, If they are
so advanced, why can they avoid hitting a chimney?

On August 27, 1952 in Lamberton, North Carolina, a saucer-shaped
craft, 3 by 2 m, landed on the witness's property after hitting a chimney.
A little man, about 70 cm tall, emerged and was asked whether he was hurt,
but he did not answer. The craft took off with a whistling sound.

Sometimes a good road map can go a long way, just don't
give out the time, as you can see from these accounts

On October 20, 1954 in Raon-l'Etage, France, Forty-year-old
Lazlo Ujvari was suddenly confronted by a man wearing a jacket, boots,
and cloth headgear (like a pilot's) who pointed a gun at him and said something
he could not understand. When Ujvari spoke to him in Russian, the man answered
in the same language, asked whether he was in Spain or Italy, and how far
he was from Germany. When he asked the time, Ujvari said: "2:30."
The man took his watch and said "You lie; it's 4:00." Then he
wanted to know how far and in what direction Marseilles was. He made Ujvari
walk on the road with him, and they came close to a gray craft with an
antenna on top. When he was about 200 m away, he heard a soft whistling
sound and saw it fly straight up, then take an oblique trajectory.

Nothing like making friends with newcomers, they were
lost and still took him for a trip.

On February 1949 in Pucusana, Peru, a C. A. V. an oil
company employee, 30, was driving to Lima when he saw a shiny disk at ground
level. He walked toward it for 10 min. Three figures came out, as he was
20 m away. They looked like mummies, had joined legs and one large foot.
They "slid" along the ground. They were covered with a strange
"towely" skin, asked the witness where they were, had a lengthy
discussion with him, and took him for a trip in their craft.

These aliens would fit in out there in Hollywood, they
could land and no one would notice, nice outfits though.

On November 6, 1957 in Playa del Rey, California, a Richard
Kehoe was driving near the beach when his engine stopped, and so did three
other cars. The man got out and observed an egg-shaped object wrapped in
"a blue haze" on the beach. Two men, below average height got
out of the craft and asked them questions about their identity, what time
it was, etc. They looked normal wore black leather pants, white belts,
light-colored jerseys, and seemed to have yellowish-green skin. They went
back inside the craft, which left rapidly, and the cars could then be started.

They liked his dog.

On October 4, 1954 in Chaleix, France, a farmer, Mr.
Garreau, saw an object the size of a carriage land in his field. Two men
of normal height emerged through a sliding door. They wore khaki overalls
and were of European type. They shook hands with the witness and said something
like: "Paris? Nord?" (According to another version they spoke
indistinct words.) They gave a pat on the back to Mr. Garreau's dog and
took off at an Amazing speed.

More breakdowns this time with rubber pants.

On October 9, 1954 in Rinkerode, Germany a Willi Hoge,
a projectionist, saw four occupants of an object that had come to ground
level 70 m from the road. He was returning home when he observed a blue
light and thought an airplane had made an emergency landing. The object
was cigar-shaped, and four men wearing rubber coveralls were working under
it. They were about 1.2 m tall and had very large chests and oversized
heads; their legs were short and thin

A breakdown with tight-fitting clothes.

On April 24, 1950 in Abbiate Guazzone, Italy, a Bruno
Facchini heard and saw sparks coming from a dark, hovering object, near
which a man dressed in tight-fitting clothes and wearing a helmet seemed
to be making repairs. Three other men were seen near the craft. When the
work was finished, a trap through which light had been shining was closed
and the thing took off. The witness had the time to note many details of
the machine and its occupants.

On June 19, 1951 in Sonderborg, Denmark, a Joseph Matiszewski,
a mechanic, heard a whistling sound and saw an object land in a meadow.
Approaching within 50 m, he found himself paralyzed and observed that birds
had stopped singing and cows seemed to be similarly unable to move. From
the object emerged four handed- men who had brown skin and wore black shiny
suits and translucent helmets. Eight objects also emerged from the craft
and hovered above it. Other men inside the craft and on its deck appeared
to be making repairs, then the objects flew to about 100 m altitude and
climbed rapidly out of sight. Only then did the paralysis subside.

On September 24, 1954 in Becar, near Diges and "Les
Michauts" or "Les Jolivets", France, two women (Widow Geoffroy
and Miss Gisele Fin) made independent reports of a dark gray disk, 6 m
in diameter, 1 m high, seen in a clearing. A man of normal height was standing
close to it. He wore dark clothes and a kind of cap. Miss Fin came within
30 m of the craft and stated the man was repairing it. Traces were found
on the grass.

Why didn't you tell me before I touched it? Thanks a
bunch!

On October 23, 1954 in Tripoli, Libya, a farmer saw a
flying craft descend to ground level about 50 m away, with a sound like
that of a compressor. It was an egg-shaped machine with six wheels and
complex machinery. The top half was transparent, flooded with bright white
light. Aboard were six men in yellowish coveralls, having human faces and
masks. When he touched part of the craft, the witness felt a strong electric
shock. One of the occupants motioned for him to stay away. For the next
20 min, the witness was able to observe the six men, apparently busy with
instruments. Reliable investigations were made.

Sometimes you just have to stop and smell the flowers.
and steal them.

On November 1, 1954 in Poggio d'Ambra, Italy, a 40-year-old
lady going to a cemetery suddenly observed an object, shaped like two cones
with a common base, resting on a grassy space. Two small seats were visible
inside the lower cone. From behind the object appared two dwarfs, 1 m tall,
wearing gray coveralls and reddish helmets. Speaking words she could not
understand, and with smiles that showed fine white teeth, they took a pot
of flowers from the witness and flew away.

Sky-watching? Hmm.

In summer, 1952 in Itenhaem, Brazil, a thunderclap and
a strong bluish light awakened a woman. As she got out, she saw a large
number of hovering disk-shaped machines resembling "inverted soup
plates" 200 m away at an altitude of about 1 m. She observed them
for 30 min, saw two figures standing on one of the craft and looking at
the sky. They went back inside, and shortly thereafter the "fleet"
took off, one object at a time.

And you gotta stop to smell the grass.

In March 1954 near Santa Maria, Brazil, a Rubem Hellwig
was driving when he saw a football-shaped machine, the size of a Volkswagen,
on the ground. He walked toward it and met two men of slim build, normal
height, their faces brownish, wearing no helmets. One was inside the object
while the other collected grass samples. They spoke to Hellwig in a strange
language, and yet he said he understood they were asking for ammonia. He
directed them to a nearby town. The craft vanished silently and instantly
with blue and yellow flames.

And we should also include the just plain rude type aliens.

On July 2, 1953 in Villares des Saz, Spain, Approximate
date. An illiterate boy cowherd, Maximo Munos Olivares, 14, saw a "big
balloon" on the ground behind him when a faint whistling attracted
his attention. Shaped like a water jug, it was metallic. Through an opening
came three dwarfs 60 cm tall, with yellow faces, narrow eyes, and oriental
features. They spoke in a language he could not understand. They were dressed
in blue, had a sort of flat hat with a visor in front and a metal sheet
on their arms. One of them smacked the boy's face, and then they reentered
the machine, which glowed very brightly, made a soft whistling sound and
went off "like a rocket." Footprints and four holes 5 cm deep
forming a perfect square 36 cm in side were found by police.

They came to Earth to destroy the newspaper?

On December 16, 1965 in Sauce Viejo, Argentina, a railroad
worker, Cesar T.Gallardo, was surprised when his carbide lamp and his radio
stopped working. He saw strange lights outside the sleeping coach where
he was reading, and a luminous being whose legs were clad in shiny dark
cloth came in, tore up his newspaper, poured the contents of an oil can
into a small bottle and went away, leaving the witness amazed. Other people
saw "a luminous man" walking along the tracks.

And a "Dbano da skigyay o dbano," to you too,
buddy!

On October 19, 1954 in Fabriano, Italy, Two men saw a
disk-shaped object, 6 m diameter, hovering and emitting small violet flashes.
On top of it was a very high antenna. Two small robot like beings, 1.2
m tall, descended from it on a long ladder. Their eyes were "sharp"
and dark red. They said something that sounded like "Dbano da skigyay
o dbano," went back aboard their craft, and flew away

Remember; you should always make friendly gestures to
aliens.

On September 10, 1954 in Mourieras, France, a farmer,
Mr. Mazaud was walking home when he was suddenly confronted with a helmeted
being of average height who made friendly gestures, then went back into
the brush, entered a cigar-shaped object about 4 m long, which took off
toward Limoges. A few minutes' later witnesses in Limoges reported a disk-shaped,
red object leaving a bluish trail.

Again on September 17, 1954 in Cenon, France, Between
Cenon and Vouneuil, Yves David, 28, met a being in a diving suit that made
friendly gestures. He was very small and had a voice "inhuman and
incomprehensible." The witness could not move throughout the encounter.
He saw the creature enter an object on the road, about 3 m by 1 m in size;
it took off "like lightning," throwing a greenish light.

And on October 1, 1954 in Jussey, France, Two young men
saw a luminous white disk moving in the sky. It dived to the ground and
two men, described as being very tall and dressed in white, emerged from
it and made gestures. The witnesses ran away in fear.

On May 1, 1957 at Pajasblancas Airport in Argentina.
When his motorcycle suddenly failed, the driver observed a disk, 20 m in
diameter and 5 m thick, hovering about 15 m above ground. He hid in a ditch
and saw the craft come down, making a sound similar to air escaping from
a valve. A sort of lift descended from its base almost to the ground. In
it was a man of average height, who made friendly gestures to the witness.
He was dressed in a plastic diving suit. The witness entered the machine
and saw inside several people seated before instrument panels, lighted
by an extraordinary light. He was then escorted out, and the disk rose
to the northwest. During the next hour, independent witnesses made six
sightings along the same course.

Our new secret weapon- flash cameras.

On February 21, 1965 in Chalac, Argentina, About 50 Toba
Indians, including policemen, saw three little men with luminous glows
emerge from an object that had made several low passes over the village
with other flying craft. A photographer took several pictures and noted
that the creatures feared the light from his flash camera. The object increased
in luminosity as it took off.

And be sure to take plenty of pictures too!

On March 2, 1965 in Brooksville, Florida a John F. Reeves,
65, retired, was walking in the woods when he observed an object10 m in
diameter, 2m thick, saucer-shaped with an outer rim and a stairway. After
watching it for 10 min, he saw a robot-like being, about 1.30m tall, wearing
a silver uniform, glass headgear, and then returned with a box that emitted
a flash when pointed at the witness. The object subsequently took off with
a whistling sound.

And sometimes when you just gotta go.those intergalactic
rest stops are getting farther and farther apart.

On September 20, 1965 in Pichaca, Peru, a farmwoman saw
an object land, and six dwarfs, 80 cm tall, emerged from it. They wore
very shiny white clothes and "walked like ducks." She hid during
the observation, and noted that they spoke in a language she could not
understand. After their departure, a liquid resembling vinegar was found
on the ground.

More Breakdowns, maybe we should start an intergalactic
Auto Club?

On October 11, 1954 in Taupignac, France, Three men driving
near Taupignac got out of their car to observe an intense red sphere in
the sky. Then they discovered a round machine with a dome, 6 m diameter,
giving off a yellow-red light, 200 m away at 10 m altitude. It was motionless
and silent. It suddenly moved horizontally for a short distance and landed
behind a wood. Two witnesses went closer and saw four dwarfs, 1 m tall,
who seemed busy with the machine. The creatures rushed inside when the
witnesses arrived within 15 m. The witness was blinded by a sudden burst
of light, blue, then orange, then red, and the object took off vertically
at fantastic speed.

These reports make me think our alien friends are a little
weird, to say the least. I guess if your going to have an encounter, it
should be strange...