A man asked people for fifty-thousand dollars for his talking dog. He brings him into the bar, but the bartender doesn't believe the dog can talk so the guy asks the dog, "What's the opposite of smooth?"

The dog says, "Rough."

And then the guy asks the dog, "What's the part of the house that has the chimney sticking out of it?"

"Roof."

"And who was the great homerun hitter in the twenties and thirties?"

"Ruth!"

The bartender says, "You big fake, get that dog out of here." So the guy and his dog go outside. Then the dog says, "What was I supposed to say? Mel Ott?"