The Dorklyst: The 13 Greatest Snow Levels in Videogame History

December 8, 2010

4.

Welcome to Snowhead, home of the Gorons in Majora's Mask. The Gorons are weird creatures  they eat rocks, willingly live in a place known as Death Mountain, and are universally-male. And weirder still, the naturally fire-resistant Gorons live in a snowy place (appropriately) known as Snowhead. While there, Link gets an awesome Goron mask, engages in Goron races, and defeats a giant bull (not-at-all-appropriately) known as Goht. And while you're there, might as well stop to wonder why young Link refuses to wear pants in the freezing cold. Or ever.

3.

Surface is a pretty creepy level  the sky is pitch black, the trees are just walls painted like trees, and the ground is covered in white snow, just waiting to be covered with the blood of nameless soldiers. And as James Bond, legendary block-faced spy known for his strategy of "kill everything with an AK47 instead of ever using stealth" (at least, in this game), you're tasked with sneaking into a giant satellite facility in the middle of Siberia. What Bond probably didn't expect was how easily it was to get lost in this level, especially when the ground magically appears in front of you every few feet.

2.

While all of these levels are chock full of snow, most of them treat snow like bumpy white concrete instead of what it is: nature's cocaine (except slightly less addictive). Not Uncharted 2 though  the snow gets on your clothes, you leave foot tracks, and flies through the air like something out of a Tony Montana wet dream. It was so believable, you can practically taste that yellow snow you accidentally ate when you were 5. Unfortunately, the yetis in the game break the sense of realism a bit, since everyone knows real yetis look exactly like Wampas.

1.

Winter is a weird season  it's about being miserably cold and sick, but it's also a season filled with holiday cheer and warm memories of togetherness. This level fully captures that dichotomy in a single mission  you need to reunite a baby penguin with its mother by grabbing it and trekking down the perilous mountain. It's adorable, endearing, dangerous, and involves a fat stranger in red invading a kid's personal space. Also: Mario should really get a coat.