10 Dumbest
Things to Say
to a Cop
Contest: First
Round of
Voting Gets
Underway
web posted
August 18,
2014COUNTY
– The
first round of
voting for the
Top 10 Dumbest
Things to Say to
a Police Officer
is now underway.
Below you will
find 24 entries
that made if
through the
initial phase,
with duplicate
entries
eliminated by
the date the
entry was
received. With
readers voting,
we hope to
narrow the list
to ten and then
submit an actual
poll to
determine the
proper order of
the entries to
determine the
winners. Good
luck to all
those who
entered.

Below are the
entries to be
voted on. Of the
24 entries, pick
ten you feel are
the best and
email the list
(numbers only)
to the editor
for the votes to
be tallied. DO
NOT list them by
the order in
which you think
they are the
funniest or
change to number
given to an
entry. Doing so
will cause your
vote to be
counted toward
another listing,
not the ones you
choose.

Example: Your
list emailed
to the editor
should look
something like
this (taking
even number
entries for the
example) 2, 4,
6, 8, 10, 12,
14, 16, 18, 20
and in the order
they appear in
the listing. The
final vote will
determine which
will rank where
in the Top 10
list.

1. Officer: Any
drugs, weapons,
or any other
illegal
substances?
Person: No
thanks, I've
already got all
that.

2. Police
Officer: "Do you
know how fast
you were
going?"
Citizen: "Fast
enough to get
you to put down
your doughnut!"

3. Officer: how
much have you
had to drink.
Person: in dog
beers just
one.

4. Officer: Sir
do you know why
I pulled you
over?
Person: Yes, I
was speeding and
I let you catch
me, how bout
best outta three

5. Person to
Officer: Hey
Dude! You got a
rolling paper?

6. Person to
Officer: So,
don't you text
and drive
officer?

7. Person to
Officer: How was
I to know it was
YOU I was
passing? There's
no markings on
that car what so
ever!

8. Officer stops
teenage driver
who was
traveling at an
excess
speed. The
teenager denied
that he was
speeding when
the officer said
"you were going
90 miles an
hour" then the
teenager said
"sir, you must
be wrong, my car
will only go
85".

9. Cop pull man
over with bottle
on seat, tells
him he is under
arrest for
driving drunk.
Man tells cop: I
am not drunk, I
am still
drinking.

10. Cop pull man
over driving
while drinking,
tell him he is
driving the
wrong way down a
one way street,
man tells Cop: I
am not going but
one way.

11. Officer:
"Raise one leg
off the ground,
extend both of
your arms out to
the sides and
lean your head
back, them one
arm at a time
touch your nose
with your
finger"
Person: "Sir, I
can't do that
when I am sober"

12. Cop turns on
blue light and
pulls a car
over.
Driver says "Did
you really mean
to stop me or
have you made a
mistake?"

13. Officer:
Sir, did you not
know we are
conducting
checks for
speeders and we
are looking for
violators such
as you.
Driver: Officer,
I got here FAST
as I could.

14. Officer: do
you know how
fast you were
going?
Lady: fast
enough for you
to smell the
donuts in my
passenger seat!

15. Officer:
that knife can
be considered a
concealed
weapon!
Person: if you
think that is
concealed you
would hate to
see wants under
the seat

16.
Officer:
Sir, we are
conducting
checks for
speeding. You
were clocked
going 60 in a 45
MPH Zone. Do you
have a Medical
Emergency?
Driver:
Officer, My wife
is getting
pregnant today
with our first
child. I wanted
to be there when
it happens.

17. Driver to
Officer: Want a
beer?

18.
Officer:
Miss do you know
why I pulled you
over?
Miss: Well if
you don't
remember than
I'm not going to
tell you.....

19. Officer:
have you seen
this lady she's
missing?
Person : no but
I have her
sister in my
basement .

20. Officer: did
you run that
stop sign?
Person: yes I'm
late to the
party - you
should come -
fyi bring some
beer.

21. Operator:
911 what's your
emergency?
Caller: yes
where is the
closest crack
house to me?

22. Officer:
Miss is that
alcohol in
that cup?
She looks in the
cup and say's
...... "Looks
like Jesus did
it again".....

23. Officer at
the Checkpoint:
Sir, your eyes
seem to be
glazed. Have
you
been drinking
tonight?
The Driver
Replies:
Officer, your
eyes seems to be
glazed. Have
you
been eating
doughnuts
tonight?

24. Officer:
Sir, the reason
I stopped you is
you were driving
60 in a 30 miles
per hour zone.
Driver: Yeah,
but I'm only
going to driving
for 30 minutes…