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Adversity in childhood can create long-lasting scars, damaging our cells and our DNA, and making us sick as adults
When children or teens face adversity and especially unpredictable stressors, they are left with deeper, longer‑lasting scars. When the young brain is thrust into stressful situations over and over again without warning, and stress hormones are repeatedly ramped up, small chemical markers, known as methyl groups, adhere to specific genes that regulate the activity of stress‑hormone receptors in the brain. These epigenetic changes hamper the body’s ability to turn off the stress response. In ideal circumstances, a child learns to respond to stress, and recover from it, learning resilience. But kids who’ve faced chronic, unpredictable stress undergo biological changes that cause their inflammatory stress response to stay activated.Human beings convert traumatic emotional experiences in childhood into organic disease later in life. Often, these illnesses can be chronic and lifelong. Autoimmune disease. Heart disease. Chronic bowel disorders. Migraines. Persistent depression.
Children who face emotional or physical abuse, or experience childhood neglect, or witness marital discord between their parents are more likely to develop cardiovascular disease, lung disease, diabetes, headaches, multiple sclerosis and lupus as adults.aeon

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We Live in an Age of Irrational Parenting
Absent having any other conspicuous way to prove moral worth — by taking care of their own parents, say, or heading up local civic organizations — we instead try to show our virtue through parenting. It’s become our new plumage, how we parent, peacockishly displayed on Facebook and in playgrounds and at birthday parties; the result is a culture of surveillance and judgment rather than compassion and collaboration, and frankly, it’s exhausting — nor is it doing anyone one lick of good.NYMAG.COM

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How Your Birth Order Can Influence Who You Are
Due to a differential treatment by their parents during early childhood, firstborns prefer self-referenced standards to evaluate their competence. That is, they approach tasks with the desire to develop knowledge, skills, and task mastery. On the other hand, secondborns tend to evaluate their competence in terms of other-referenced standards. They are more strongly inclined to approach tasks with the desire to demonstrate competence relative to others.Firstborns consistently rank higher on intelligence tests. The going theory is that they get more attention and resources from parents. Firstborn children are almost exclusively exposed to adult language, whereas laterborn children experience the less mature, childish speech of their older siblings.io9

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Do Parents Nurture Narcissists By Pouring On The Praise?It’s a lot better to say ‘You worked really hard’ than ‘You must be really smart’, because if you tell the kid that they’re smart and then if they fail they think ‘Oh I’m stupid.’ If the praise relates to effort, a child who fails will work harder next time.
People with high self-esteem tend to have lower levels of anxiety and depression over time. Parents can raise their children’s self-esteem just by expressing more warmth. If you want to look for a substitute for ‘You’re special,’ just say ‘I love you,’.NPR