Dating Porn Stars

I don’t want to sound like some really heavy, negative-vibe merchant, but this week hasn’t been a good one. I’m glad to say, though, that this is not the case for everyone.

There’s this cool bloke at work who does our journalism and reporting. I say he’s cool, because he’s got big hair, he’s smoked a few doobies laced with opium and he lives in Bethnal Green (officially the coolest area in London). And what makes him even cooler, is that he’s going out on a date with a porn star tonight called Scarlet O’Whora.

If you Google her, the very first hit will say “Scarlet O’Whora takes a Black Cock inside her Asshole“. Nice!

Anyway, I’m not going to mention the journalist’s name – just in case any future prospective employers Google his name and find him associated with somebody called Scarlet O’Whora. Or worse still, associated with me. Nevertheless, I salute you, Sir.

I wonder if she’s got any friends in the business you’d go out with me? I’m going to ask him in the morning…

In other news, I bought a massive porkpie for £1.25 in Iceland. It really is massive. And it has to be eaten by 22nd of January. I see no problems there.