Hey, you too have had that dream with the afro-haired warthog trying to sell you insurance but then everything gets drained like when you pull the plug on a bath tub and you find yourself floating in the Cygnus star system amid the alien mega-structures and the space dragons, right? Right? No. Hmm. Odd.

Anyway, there are other dreams that are quite common if you take into consideration the many people that have had them along the ages and were polite and conscientious enough to write them down or discuss them with their less than interested friends over a coffee… or… tea… whatever they drank back then…

Some of these universal dream trips will be presented below for your intrigued perusal along with the “standard” interpretations, but unfortunately without the coffee as I’ve ran out of it when serving it to the Devil as we chatted about the state of the music industry. Or was that another dream? …

1. The clothes issue

Or better called “The case of the ‘Where the hell did my clothes just vanish’ dream scenario”. This dream theme tends to happen regardless of location or the actions taking place. Whether running, talking, working etc. , in the dream, many people have suddenly had it shift to their discovery that they are partially or totally naked.

The common interpretation is that this dream implies insecurity, a sense of being unprepared or insufficiently prepared for something. Or maybe it’s just your inner repressed exhibitionist tryin’ to have some fun.

2. The dunce

This dream features you staring like an idiot at a test paper while frantically fidgeting both physically and mentally to try and remember SOMETHING, ANYTHING! No matter what you do, the dream tends to unfold with you NOT remembering anything that you were supposed to study for the test and the predominant feeling is that this particular test is reeeeeeally important. Of the life altering kind. Talk about slow torture.

It’s usually interpreted as a need of performance for fear of being rejected otherwise and/or associated with an intense drive towards being responsible. Or maybe it’s a memory of those many times you did slack off and didn’t study for the test. Admit it, you procrastinator. You’re reading this article instead of studying, huh?

3. Ruuuuuun!

That awesome adrenaline releasing (but not in the good way!), and near-heart attack inducing, epic blockbuster in which you play the prey and some undefined or TOO defined monster plays the main character that is damned fast, damned strong, smart too, and will certainly catch you in the next second. Fun stuff! Oh, did I mention the also common variation of this dream in which you suddenly can’t run anymore or become paralyzed? FUN. STUFF!

The meaning? Stop hanging out in monster residential areas! Kidding. Apparently it represents the fear of accepting the consequences of an action or decision you took, which can also be judging someone badly.

4. Da’ Bling

You found money or precious materials like jewelry or gold. Awesome! Looks like we gonna make it rain in da’ club sometime soon, ya know wha’ I’m sayin’?! Yeeeeah.

Don’t get too excited. It appears the common interpretation for this dream signals the exact opposite. Namely, the dream is just your subconscious response to being broke as hell and/or being afraid of never being NOT broke as hell. And it gets better, a variation of the interpretation also adds the hint that you might actually be harboring a deep-seated conviction that you don’t DESERVE to be loved, respected, successful, rich etc. Or maybe the initial interpreter was just jealous that other people are richer than them in dreams. Totally possible.

5. Snap and tumble

This one is one of my horrors, as I’m sure it is for other people who have had it as well. So, you’re in the dream world, just minding your own business like any respectable inhabitant when all of a sudden, without so much as a “hey, you’re about to TRY and scream in horror soon!” to warn you, YOUR TEETH START FALLING. And I say TRY to scream in horror because when you attempt it, they tumble down your throat. A decidedly uncomfortable and psychologically crippling experience (yes, scientists have proven that the same areas of the brain are used in dreaming as they are in real life, so, in essence, your brain makes no difference between real experiences and those in a dream…). The irrevocable nature of your teeth falling (fast!), as you are convinced they are in the dream, is also quite terrifying.

The good news? There IS no good news. Didn’t I emphasize the horror of this dream already?! Apparently, it means you’re just concerned about not being pleasing enough to others. OR, it means you’re afraid of aging. I don’t have any jokes for this one. The Tooth Fairy took them all along with MY TEETH!