November 30, 2011

The Lebanese poet Kahlil Gibran told the world about a hundred years ago that “your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.” Now I know there is a lot of hustle ’n bustle around planning a wedding, and oddly enough, it doesn’t always include the language of the heart. Sometimes the pressure builds and harsh words are spoken. So perhaps if you included more “silence” as the poet says, words of love become the main language!

Conversations With God author Neale Donald Walsch advises us to cultivate the ability to listen to and learn the language of your heart...and let there be quiet:

Listen to your heart. Practice it. Produce it. Perfect it. It is not that difficult. Just be quiet with yourself. And for heaven’s sake, stop listening to your mind. You will not find the truth there. You may find the answer, but it will not be the truth unless it coincides with the answer in your heart.

You think there is more to know about life than this, but there is not. Your heart holds the key. Your heart holds the wisdom. Your heart holds the future. Your mind knows nothing but the past. It imagines the future will be just like yesterday, so it makes it decisions based on that. Only your heart can see beyond memory’s horizon.

Take a deep breath and breathe in and out of your heart until you hear the silence. (The practice can be fun...and it’s worth every quiet, productive, heart-full moment.) Then go and have a beautiful, full-of-love wedding and life...with time to be quiet with yourself. Love. Listen. Let go....with love from Cornelia
[Photograph: The Nichols]

November 23, 2011

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Do you think that abundance is limited ... that good fortune skips a day in your life? Wise spiritual guides tell us that what we might consider as lack of abundance or a misfortune is actually an opportunity to open our hearts even wider ... a reminder to be thankful for what we do have. It seems blessings come a’calling to a grateful heart!

Over two thousand years ago, the Roman philosopher Cicero said “a grateful heart is the greatest virtue.” We receive gifts each day that we may not recognize as gifts, but anytime we express appreciation for the experience we’ve been given—no matter what it is—then our hearts open that much more.

Keep your heart available for love in abundant proportions . . . and abundance is yours. Remember that it’s a generous dose of gratitude that returns you to the virtue and “fortunes” of love.

November 16, 2011

Dear Bride-to-Be:
On your wedding day, set aside a bit of “just for you” meditative time to relax, center yourself and get grounded . . . a moment to simply melt into your heart. For help in relaxing, you can listen to soft music, gently stretch your body, read a favorite love poem, or do a soothing deep-breathing exercise. (Or a combination of all of them!)

As you relax during your little “wedding day reverie,” let go of any noisy thoughts and allow the world to get quieter so you can hear your inner voice. What messages are you hearing? Whatever comes up, just breathe love into it.

Easy does it. As you continue to enjoy your reverie moments, take more deep, slow, soft breaths and relax more deeply and allow your body to remember that sweet moment of “falling in love.” Breathe in the feeling so you can recreate it fresh and new—and take that feeling with you throughout the day. Share it with friends, family, strangers.

Like love, weddings are about inclusion. Be the goddess of love today!

November 9, 2011

Dear Bride-To-Be: There is a wise Chinese proverb that says: “Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.”

Wherever you are in your wedding planning process—just thinking about it, in the middle of making lists, only a few days away from your wedding—it’s probably a busy time for you! Yet it doesn’t have to be tense; you don’t have to be tense. So take a deep...slow...easy breath and just relax. Although it may seem at odds with how you feel since being tense has become the new “normal” in our hectic world, but be a bold trailblazer! Shine some light in all the frenzy and change your default setting to “relax.”

I know, I know. In our busy noisy world, we have made relaxation “hard”—but you can make it easy and lusciously refreshing for yourself. One way is to simply sit alone quietly for a few minutes in a peaceful spot ... slowly, softly, deeply breathing in and breathing out. Paying attention to your breathing is a chance to quiet your busy mind and allow your body to be at rest. This little practice would be a gift of ease and heart-opening softness for yourself ... even if it’s only five minutes of quiet solitude a day. (It will make a difference in how you feel, how you look and how you see the world.) Do this for yourself and by doing something relaxing for yourself, you’re doing it for everyone around you.

“Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.” So be your authentically beautiful self and slow down, breathe deeply and relax. Then go have a glorious day.

November 2, 2011

Dear Bride-to-Be: As you're preparing for your wedding, you will hear and see lots of familiar "wedding expressions" in your daily routine that are actually rooted in the past. Like "tie the knot"....

You've probably heard some of the stories of its origin: how a couple would tie a rope or scarf in a ceremonial knot as a wedding ritual, symbolizing their connection and faith to each other. Perhaps you know of someone who has used a version of the ritual in their ceremony.

But did you know that the original ceremony -- from the ancient Celtic culture -- was a very intricate weaving that would entwine the couple's hands within the knot at the same time? This Celtic love knot pattern consists of complete loops that have neither a beginning nor an end. It was difficult to do and took a lot of practice by the couple, becoming like a meditative rehearsal for intimacy. The purpose was not only to create a "symbol" of the continuance of life and love, but was actually to help create or deepen an intimate bond between the couple.

Imagine doing this ceremony with your beloved: you are standing face to face; you feel the cording on your skin as it connects the two of you together; your hands become entwined; you are drawn even closer as you look into the eyes of your beloved, that intimate moment of looking into the "mirror of your soul" through another.

This is the purpose of all ancient wedding rituals: to create an intimacy of connection for the couple; to connect hearts for a lifetime. And the wisdom of the Celtic love knot ceremony takes it even deeper: entwining the heart of your relationship for inner-growth and self-discovery ... and the experience of practicing unending love together. Relationships don't always last, but the love that brings people together can indeed be everlasting with a little bit of practice.