October 19 - October 25, 1995

VIOLENCE UNBOUND: "Perhaps women were once so dangerous
they had to have their feet bound," writes author Maxine
Hong Kingston. And perhaps men have become so dangerous they need
to beat and murder women in record numbers.

Family Violence Prevention Fund statistics continue to boggle
our brains: fourteen percent of American women acknowledge having
been violently abused by a husband or boyfriend. Forty-two percent
of murdered women are killed by their intimate male partners.
Medical personnel correctly diagnose only one in 35 battered women.

Recent Arizona Department of Economic Security figures are just
as numbing:

Last year 5,474 women and children sought help at the state's
28 shelters. Forty-five percent of the abuse was done by spouses.
Only 663 batterers were arrested.

Frankly, I don't think about battered women on a daily basis.
When you live with a gentle man, like I do, a man who never raises
his hand toward you except to brush the hair out of your eyes
or offer a hug, you get out of touch.

This summer I got "in touch" when I saw my friend being
emotionally and psychologically abused by her husband. He was
isolating her from friends and family. He made disparaging remarks
about her myriad interests. He controlled all the money, even
though they both worked. One day he shoved her out of the way.
Last week I got a letter from her. She went for counseling--he
refused to go--and came home with some pills for depression. She
says her husband is "better." Thank God for drugs.

Women like me ask ourselves the same stupid questions again and
again--like, why do they take it, why do they stay--even though
we know it's the financial problems, the fear, the confusion,
the children, the habit.

Kathleen Standish, with the Arizona Coalition Against Domestic
Violence, says since the O.J. display shelters in Arizona have
been filling up--and women are being turned away in record numbers.
She says the state desperately needs more shelters, especially
in rural areas. The legal system is also weak. "There are
not a lot of attorneys who do pro bono work," she laments.

Governor J. Fife Symington III, saying he has "found"
$1 million for domestic violence action in Arizona, has earmarked
$460,000 dollars of that for direct shelter support. The rest
will go towards "implementing a state plan," says Standish.
Not another task force, I moan, thinking of the women who must
go home to a batterer tonight because there's no room at the inn.
But Standish, who relies on state and federal dollars, says we
need the plan to create a coordinated effort of professionals,
from courts to clergy to media. "It's everybody's problem,"
she says, and "it's going to take a lot of money."
And how many more broken bones?

By the time you finish reading this column, another 10 women
in this country will have been physically abused by their husbands.

And that's if you're reading fast, warriors.
--Hannah Glasston

For shelter assistance call The Brewster Center at 622-6347
or Tucson Centers for Women and Children, 795-4266.