How Paedophiles Groom Victims

How Paedophiles Groom VictimsMost paedophiles groom their victims in a series of predictable stages. .

Learn what to watch out for and how to intervene.Many people think that child molesters are strange men who hide in bushes and snatch unsuspecting children off the streets. But in truth, a child is much more likely to be molested by someone he or she knows.Before the molestation takes place, the perpetrator goes to great lengths to cement his or her relationship with the child to insure compliance. This behavior is called “grooming.” According to INTERPOL, “The majority of sex offenders groom their victims.”Although this article refers to the pedophile as “he” parents should remember that women may also be abusers.Identifying a Possible VictimThe first stage in the grooming process is the identification of a likely victim. Pedophiles differ in their preferences regarding gender, age, and appearance, but almost every pedophile looks for a child who is vulnerable in some way. Keep an eye out for any adult who does not have children but who spends a lot of time around places like your child’s school and playground. Don’t be shy about asking questions of anyone who seems to be watching your child too closely. Collecting InformationThe pedophile’s next step is to gather as much information as possible about the intended victim. Often this is done through casual conversation with the victim and/or the victim’s parents. Be on guard if an adult starts asking you or your child questions that are overly intrusive and personal. Teach your child that he or she does not need to provide personal information just because an adult asks for it. Once the pedophile knows a little about his victim, he steps into that child’s life to fill a need. Thus a poor child might receive expensive gifts, a lonely child might receive extra time and attention, and a child who feels unloved might receive unconditional affection. Know the adults who play a dominant role in your child’s life. Be aware if your child suddenly starts talking about one adult more than any other.Lowering InhibitionsNext the pedophile begins working to lower the child’s inhibitions about sexual matters. He may make sexual comments, show the child pornographic movies or pictures, or manufacture situations where he and the child will be undressed.At this stage, children sometimes become a little uncomfortable around the abuser. Watch for any changes in attitude towards an adult that has been important in your child’s life. Watch, too, for inappropriate sexual comments or interest. (E.g., “Mr. Smith says I have big boobs.”)Initiating the AbuseAt this stage, the pedophile begins overt sexual abuse of the child. When the abuse occurs, many children show marked changes in their personalities and behaviors. Often they will look for an excuse to avoid the abuser. When it comes to protecting your child from abuse, inform yourself about the stages of grooming and trust your knowledge and intuition. If you have any concerns about the adults in your child’s life, investigate further and, if necessary, put a stop to any questionable relationships. Anyone who truly cares about children will understand your desire to protect your child from harm and respect your decision.

Facts and figures about child abuse

Facts and figures about child abuseA significant minority of children suffer serious abuse or neglect, according to NSPCC research:•7 per cent of children experienced serious physical abuse at the hands of their parents or carers during childhood.•1 per cent of children experienced sexual abuse by a parent or carer and another 3 per cent by another relative during childhood.•11 per cent of children experienced sexual abuse by people known but unrelated to them. 5 per cent of children experienced sexual abuse by an adult stranger or someone they had just met.•6 per cent of children experienced serious absence of care at home during childhood.•6 per cent of children experienced frequent and severe emotional maltreatment during childhood.1•16 per cent of children experienced serious maltreatment by parents, of whom one third experienced more than one type of maltreatment. 32,700 children on child protection registers in the UK as at 31 March 2003.Nearly 79,000 children are currently looked after by local authorities in the UK.Every week in England and Wales one to two children will die following cruelty.There are on average 80 child homicides recorded in England and Wales each year.Every 10 days in England and Wales, on average, one child is killed at the hands of their parent. An average of 35 a year over the past five years.The people most likely to die a violent death are babies less than a year old, who are four times more likely to be killed than the average person in England and Wales.Three-quarters of sexually abused children did not tell anyone about the abuse at the time, and around a third still had not told anyone about their experience(s) by early adulthood.Over a quarter of all rapes recorded by the police are committed against children under 16 years of age.31 per cent of children experienced bullying during childhood, a further 7 per cent were discriminated against and 14 per cent were made to feel different/an outsider. 43 per cent experienced at least one of these things during childhood.NSPCC teams and Helplines accepted over 24,000 requests for help in 2003-4.The National Commission of Inquiry into the Prevention of Child Abuse estimated that the cost of child abuse to statutory and voluntary agencies is £1 billion per year in the UK

Child abuse leaves more than just bruises

Child abuse leaves more than just bruises. Long after children have recovered from the physical results of a beating, abused children suffer from emotional and psychological trauma that can last the rest of their lives.Adults who experienced child abuse in their youth are more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, commit violent crimes, form unhealthy relationships, and even abuse their ownchildren.Keep these key facts in mind:•Child abusers can be any age, any gender, and any race. They can be from any economic class and have any level of education.•Children are more likely to be abused by their own parents than by a stranger.•Rarely does an incident of child abuse happen in isolation. When a child is abused once, it is likely to happen again.•Educate your neighbors and friends about child abuse. Consider emailing your acquaintances a link to this article. Or, ask an official from a local domestic violence shelter to speak to your neighborhood group, church association, PTA, or other organization. They are usually more than willing to share what they know about how to prevent child abuse.Make sure your acquaintances know that they can get help if they find themselves in a situation where they could become an abuser. It is often difficult for abusers to get help because they are afraid of losing their children and don't want to be judged by the people they know. Abusers can get the help they need by:•Making an anonymous call to the National Child Abuse Hotline. Non-judgmental hotline counselors will help them work through their problems, suggest alternative ways to interact with their children, and connect them with resources that are available in their community.•Joining a support group. Parents Anonymous holds weekly meetings around the country to help people develop positive parenting skills. The group meetings are free of charge and parents are welcome to attend for as long as they wish.•Seeking respite care. Many states offer respite care programs that will take care of a children for a few hours if they could be in danger of abuse. Such programs are not meant to be daycares, but they do offer an emergency solution for parents who need some immediate relief and don't have friends or family members they can turn to.Stop child abuse when you see it. If you have trouble identifying the difference between child abuse and acceptable forms of discipline, take a look at the government's definition of child abuse. If you're concerned that a child may be abused, it's better to be safe than sorry. Here's what you can do: During your anonymous call, their counselors can help you evaluate the situation and help you make a child abuse report to the proper authorities. If you are nervous about making a report, they will even stay on the line during a 3-way call to offer you support.•Call your state's Department of Child Protective Services directly. They will take the information you provide and do a thorough investigation into the situation. If they find that child abuse is occurring, they will remove the child from the situation.•If a child is in life-threatening danger, call 911 or if in uk 999 immediately.It's time that people take a stand against child abuse. Your simple actions will help prevent child abuse and give abused children hope for a brighter future.Unfortunately, many bystanders witness child abuse and do nothing about it. Neighbors and friends may hear or even see child abuse happening, but don't want to intrude or interfere with "the rights" of the parents. Such inaction can mean years of pain and heartbreak for young children who are unable to get out of a bad situation.Abused children need your intervention. In their helplessness, they must rely on capable adults who are willing to take a stand and get them out of an abusive environment. By being aware of child abuse, and helping to educate the people you know, you can help prevent child abuse in your community.