Behave With Girls As You Would With Horses

Jean-Batave is a martial artist from the viking stronghold of Normandy, France. He travels the world looking for new fighting techniques and new beautiful women. Eastern Europe taught him everything he knows and is his second home. His column runs every Thursday.

There are a few things that I know well. Two of them are horses and girls. Reflecting on the way men pursue women with sex or relationships as a goal and the way men tame horses, I noticed that there are eerie similarities. So here is my advice:

Apply the same behaviour with women as you would with horses and you will be more successful in your endeavours and come out a happier man.

I know some do not want to hear this, but put on your flak jacket and saddle up.

On roles and authority

– The horse has a primary function: riding. Bring it around, it comes, you ride. Then a bit of straw and see you tomorrow.

– You are the superior and dominant one, you are in charge. The horse follows your lead. You do not switch places. Science agrees.

– The male is stronger than the female. The stallion’s goal is to sire many offspring from different mares while the mare’s goal is to be fertile and take care of its progeny.

– It will test you and will sometimes refuse to follow. Pull on the tether and show who is the boss.

– Mares will excel at breeding offspring or riding. Always fit for one or the other, rarely in both.

– If it gets mad, hold tight to the rope and let it kick the air until it tires itself out. They all calm down at some point.

– Do not pass behind it carelessly or commit a mistake. You will get kicked in the groin.

– You do not say sorry to a horse. Show that you are weak or scared, it will sense it and punish you.

– You cannot reason with a horse when it misbehaves. You have to remain calm and use a combination of skills and authority.

– Never tolerate the biting. EVER. First bite if there ever is one: swift punishment then back in the line.

– They are better behaved with a bridle and a bit on.

– Always stay on your feet. Lower your guard and you will bite the dust.

– No point beating the horse with a stick or to the blood. Displaying dominance and aloofness works wonders.

– The horse supports you in your journey. You are the one with the reins, showing the path.

On riding

Tell me that this rider is not happy

– Riding horses has always been associated with masculinity.

– It is all good to observe the horse extensively, but nothing feels like riding one.

– It is much easier to sit around, look at them, and say you do not like to ride because it requires effort, than getting out there and attempt to catch them.

– Beginners fall off horses. Seasoned riders make them turn at a click of the tongue.

– When you approach, show dominant body language and no emotion. Use your voice tone to lure it in and pass the halter on its head.

– You tame a magnificent horse in its prime. It is fascinating, exhilarating. But after all, it is just a horse. Riding a beautiful horse is amazing but it is not everything there is to life.

– Give a bit of crop for the last straight line then finish strong.

– No one said that catching a fine horse would be easy. But the reward is sweet.

– If you do not ride regularly, you get rusty.

– Ride your horse often and teach it to pace its effort

– Since man became man, he has always wanted to ride the horse. Now that the engine exists, the man becomes lazy.

– The carer spends, the jockey rides.

– Loose horses never bring any good.

On relationships

– When you fall, it is on your head or your behind, rarely elsewhere. Wear a helmet and try to avoid getting your tailbone fractured.

– Everyone has fallen off his horse. The one who denies it is a liar.

– The first thing to do when you fall off a horse is to climb back up.

– Taking care of horses is a rich man’s job, often done by poor people.

– Give a carrot once in a while to reward good behaviour. It is still a being.

– Stroke it from time to time but do not translate your affection into words. It does not understand you because it is a horse. Let it neigh with its peers. Your physical touch is your medium.

– A mad horse is a danger. Get rid of it before it kicks your children in the face, damaging them forever.

– If the horse is someone else’s now, it is not your role to feed it anymore.

– Your horse ran away. Tough. Now deal with it and get another one.

– Dealing with many horses is no easy task and is an investment of time, energy and money.

On beauty

– Not every horse is special. Not every horse is beautiful.

– Only a gentle horse in good health, with well-balanced body proportions and a long, silky, natural-looking mane, is beautiful.

– Its physical shape is the index of its quality. The horse requires regular exercise and quality food.

– Sugar spoils it and is not good for its body.

– It is normal and healthy to want to ride the beautiful horse, not the mangy fat pony.

– Only fools parade around with flea-ridden, obese horses.

– Get a horse that is in its prime, not one that is old and used.

– There is a limited period of efficiency for a horse before it becomes too old.

– A lame horse is useless. People that have money to throw out the window can keep it and feed it.

On nature

– The horse will always follow the group, not questioning its direction.

– The horse runs when confronted to danger or something perceived as dangerous. It flies and does not fight. It will fight on extremely rare occasions and only if cornered.

– In the majority of cases, they are ungrateful for the care you give them.

– The horse wants to be free. You have to keep it in its paddock or it will run away.

– Compare the man who owns a lot of horses and the man who tends to them. The first one enjoys their beauty and rides them whenever he wants. The stable lad just deals with their shit, takes them for a stroll, feeds them and gives them attention. Guess how they repay him.

– The horse is a highly-social herd animal. It is not biologically programmed to be strong and independent.

– There are different breeds of horses. They have different functions and people have different tastes. A draft horse is not an English thoroughbred. It is a fact and someone that tells you otherwise is laughed at.

– Mad activists want you to think that the horse is your equal.

– The genes talk. When a horse is an idiot, high are the chances that the one before it was not the sharpest tool in the shed.

Pour finir: Cases in which these parallels do not apply

“Millennial horse”, exhibit number one

– Nature made the horse stronger than the man.

– Do not bring it around to get inseminated by a different stud every spring.

– Do not brand it with a white hot iron.

– Do not sell the offspring to the highest bidder as soon as they reach the age to be trained.

– Do not put it down if it breaks an ankle.

– Do not put a yoke on it and plow your field with it for 15 years

– A horse that has been ridden senseless is safer than one that has never been broken or ridden before.

– A large horse is usually more docile than a slender one.

– Do not let your whole family ride your horse.

There you have it. If you can think of any other, feel free to add them.

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I wouldn’t compare a woman to a dog. Dogs are far more loyal than horses, as their hearts work similar to man: win a man’s heart, and he’ll follow you to the death. Hardly the praise I would give any woman.

No shit man. It’s amazing she was chosen for the lead role in Sex in the City. Obviously this is modern woman’s poster child for sad, over the hill fugly female desperation. The only thing she didn’t represent is rampant western obesity.

How the hell did the iconic Ferris Bueller settle for that? Why Ferris, oh why?!

I’m betting the only reason she wasn’t obese was because then everyone would know it was absolute horseshit. I still remember a long car trip to a TKD tournament many years ago where the girls were watching the entire Sex In The City series in the back. It was the most obnoxious filth I ever heard. If I wasn’t asleep, I had my CD player on full blast so I didn’t have to hear it.

Well to be fair, to the individual and not the characters she played, we should take into account that when we hate an actor for the role, then that role was well played.
That this has a connection with Ferris Bueller is perfect!
You see, we were NOT supposed to like Ferris. He was a snarking self-centered douchebag. Were we supposed to like these hags from SaTC? I saw only snippets of the show over the years it was on and never saw anything likeable about those women.
That’s the joke really. People who, at one time in our society, would have been caricatures of rotten people, being “heroes” of a sort to be emulated. I wonder at times if the writers of these shows were part of the problem, or set out to display bad behavior and ended up getting the opposite reaction.
Take Al Bundy as another example. He was supposed to be the bad guy, but if you watched Married with Children, Al Bundy was a hero, a downtrodden man for the most part but his not taking shit from fat women was epic humor. And I’ll never forget the episode where Bud Bundy had a red pill moment (The sky diving episode),
SaTC was always described as a poorly written show held up only by the quality of the actors. So I’ll give her credit there. Of course if I open a browser later and see her snarking at the UN about patriarchy or something I would not be surprised but at her age she’ll be on infomercials any day now.

Back in her prime days e.g. – twenties, Kim Cattrall was actually quite pretty. She should have done us all a favor and faded into obscurity once her beauty faded and her jaw hardened, like all good looking women do when they realize that they no longer “have it goin’ on”.

I actually saw her once in a bookstore in London, doing a book signing. She had a bodyguard there threatening to remove people from the store if they weren’t there for a book signing. Everybody ignored him.

She started out in some movie with Bruce Willis, back when she was 19 I believe (or real close to it). At the time I thought “Well, at least they cast somebody who was not pretty in the role, maybe they’re trying for realism or something”. Little did I know that somehow, for reasons that have never been satisfactorily explained, she would become famous. For what, I have not even the slightest clue.

Fuck that disgusting and vile show. All I EVER gleaned from it when it was on was a bunch of stuck-up and entitled Wall-slamming cunts running around cooler-than-anywhere-else New York City going “Oh, you’re a lawyer? Let’s fuck!” “Oh, you’re a doctor? Let’s fuck!” “Oh, you’re a cab driver? Piss off!” and of course the forced cliche of lesbian “experimenting” (I just love when they try to make it sound like science!) every now and then. Yeah, great role models for our already hapless American females, I tell ya!

It will test you and will sometimes refuse to follow. Pull on the tether and show who is the boss.

This really struck me. Women will test you and I have thought about the reasons. This could be a evolutionary behavior to weed out the weak males. After all, a woman needs a man to defend her and defend the children. If he can’t even defend himself against her what use is he?

Hence the need for her to test you time to time, to gauge your strength. This is in turn prompts her ultimately to submit to your domination. Women love to be dominated by a man. This domination demonstrates your suitability as a partner. Furthermore, it explains why being a bit of a jerk (negs, put-downs, etc.) works with a woman. It shows that you will brook no foolishness from her.

Some women go to far with the testing however. These women must be ruthlessly rejected. No man needs or wants to be tested every minute of every day.

I grew up in horse country and yet I always found that they were a very difficult animal to build up a strong rapport with. Good horsemen I knew said that you should never encourage an overly familiar relationship with them as it undermines the power and authority relationship between the master and the mastered. Perhaps this is why they usually seemed cool, phlegmatic and somewhat aloof creatures to me.

I have lived on properties with horses (though I don’t have one myself) and much of this with horses is true.
In a way you have to consider that with a horse you have to keep your game on, always.
With women you have to keep your game on, always. Even if you are married. Heck becoming gameless while married is how you end up in human disasters of dysfunction, pettiness, and obesity.
This makes me wonder. The fixation with the cowboy image. Perhaps men who worked with and around horses a lot always had a “game sense” and had a natural basis for alpha mindset that made women wet in the crotch. It would not take a genius or a very observant fellow who deals with horses to make the connection that women are not far from them in behavior.

“With women you have to keep your game on, always. Even if you are married. Heck becoming gameless while married is how you end up in human disasters of dysfunction, pettiness, and obesity.”
Can you elaborate on this?

There is not much more to explain.
If you let your game down once you are married, as if having crossed some finish line, then your wife will evolve into a big fat shrew.
It’s as sure as spoiling a child. Women and children are not as far apart in wiring as one would expect. We see many cases where women are left to their own devices and things fall apart, so a woman needs to be taken care of like a child because BOTH are wired to manipulate men, just in different ways. This is humanity: women and children are least efficient in hunting game, protecting the cave, and hauling water (seeing civilization has only been around roughly 7000 years and only been so “easy” in the last 100).
A child will scream the loudest to get the most food, will throw tantrums to get what they want, etc. Let that go and you end up with a spoiled brat. While women don’t do those things (or at least didn’t back in the days of our grandfathers) , their hardwired manipulation is a little more detailed. Even they don’t know they are doing it any more than a child would have presence of mind while being a self-propelled stomach.
So what happens if, leave the marriage to no maintenance, the wife WILL get fat because she can and when a woman is secure enough to do that, she will. We’ve had many millennia of no refrigeration so what else is a woman going to do in the cave? She’s going to pack it on because you never know next year there might not be so much food. Since her survival depends on manipulation of men, if she can reduce a man to a totally subservient simp, she will.
One of the common laments of “the nice guy” is that they get dumped for being “too nice”. As we’re supposed to expect that such women who do that are sluts. I always felt this way. But I have observed that over the years, women who dump men for being too nice are in fact the ones who have departed their hard-wiring and have some self-awareness enough to know the evil rising in them when a man puts her on a pedestal. She wants a real man who is not a simp. The women we thought were evil were in fact better, more self-aware, and smarter than the primitive ooga booga minded woman who will mindlessly exploit a man and turn into a hambeast without even batting an eye or thinking twice about it (even when having to buy bigger pants every time she goes out for clothes).

You’ll have to forgive me. I haven’t studied up on game too much. Are you meaning playing the dread game on your wife, being mildly flirty with other women to keep her from getting complacent, or something else? I already don’t put up with any bullshit and don’t pander to my wife’s every petty need, but it seems like you might be addressing something beyond that.

The key components of game are:
No one “type” and severity of game works the same on every woman.
The “game” is dynamic, there is no “settling in” on what works. All factors (age, finance, SMV, kids, etc) have a role.
You have to constantly be observant and ready to adapt and overcome.
You see, long ago, men had what was known as a “study”. What was one of the things men thought about when they were alone (and that privacy was respected in there, ever notice how TV shows made fun of “the study”?) in there? Game was one of them. This is why the study has been replaced with the “man cave” where men are encouraged to be all about video games and watching sports. As if the only time you get to yourself is to be spent on mindless entertainment. Oh no, don’t give a man a chance to think about things. Men are most capable of thinking about things (because we have to – over the thousands of years men who didn’t think would die), but keeping him sandwiched between demanding wives, too much work, screaming brat kids, and his only respite being a place of infantile mindlessness keeps him off his game and keeps him from realizing his wife is a fat cow and a rotten mother.

You need not have a “Ward Cleaver” study with a desk and books and all that.
Think of it as a “construct”.
My bedroom is also my home office, but I can make it my study any moment. On occasion I have actually booted my girlfriend from it when I needed time to get things done (she does not live with me) , and I keep the door locked. Sometimes she comes by and I won’t let her in.
It’s amazing how a woman will respect your privacy and time when you assert it, but the same woman will become a black hole for your time (and your money too) if you let her. This lends to my assertion that any man can bring out the worst in any woman.

I agree. the study was where a guy would read , smoke, drink by himself. Now the “man” cave is the 21st century version of that only dumbed down where the guy watches sports all day, night ,weekend while his frustrated and passive aggressive weight gaining wife reads Fifty shades of grey and breaks out the Hitachi. Dreaming about the old days when he used to fuck her silly.Now all she wants is for her kids to get old enough so she can divorce his lazy ass. You gotta maintain your woman, guys.

I don’t think most Jockeys are particularity good at pulling women. Jockeys for the most part are consumed by their sport and all the hard slog that goes with it. Very few make good money out of it, and nearly all have to retire by their mid forties max, often on pain killers for the rest of their lives and so most women, combined with the fact that they don’t have a typical alpha build, don’t go near them. Women like horses know what side their bread is buttered on.

I knew a short skinny fellow I used to hang ductwork with. For that rare task that required someone going into the ducts, we sent him. He could have been a jockey.
He used pick up women all of the time. His lack of height and stature didn’t stop him. It was amazing to watch.

Injuries, injuries and more injuries. Look at Ruby Walsh, perhaps one the best jockeys ever. He’s only 36, but the amount of injuries he’s had is quite phenomenal, but, he’s still top of his game.I believe he has to take a lot of painkillers on a daily basis from all the old injuries and wounds that give him recurring pains. That’s dedication or just being hooked by your sport, that you’ll do anything to keep going, no matter what.

I’m thinking more along the lines of “worked with” not “worked on”. Both professions involved horses. So I’m using the term “cowboy” in general. And they didn’t even wear jeans.
My point ultimately is that because horses were common, and just about every man had to deal with them in one way or the other, they already had a taste of having to maintain an alpha trait, not let the horse “smell fear” and all that.
Compare that to these millenials today who reach the age of 20 and still refuse to drive a car because it’s too stressful for them.

” bla bla bla women are not far form horses”… Er, wait, we’re being human and I pretty think there are a HUUUUGE difference between being humen and horses. No need to be a great scientist to know that.

I recently took up western horsemanship, and was immediately struck by the parallels between how one relates to a horse and women, how things as simple as active or passive posture elicit a reaction in the horse, or how “applying pressure” and then rewarding affects their demeanor and willingness to submit. As with women, you must set boundaries for the horse, it can’t invade your personal space unless you invite it. Horses can even pick up on your character, and one can learn much about oneself reflected in the horse’s behaviour. My instructor admitted to a nervous personality, borne out in the horse’s behaviour. As for me, I was much too calm around the horse, and she mistook that for passivity and tried to have its way with me, but that was swiftly corrected. Soon after, the horse was calm and submissive. The principles of kino and comfort, leading, are the same.For example, on the second lesson my nonchalance/lack of fear/soft dominance when touching the horse, “escalating” from the face, flanks and down the legs, let her get used to my touch, and allowed me to clean the fore and hind hooves with no incidents-a surprise to my instructor. Indeed, the horse shows indicators of interest. When free-longeing you must watch the horse’s ears, to ensure it’s paying attention to you, and watch it’s mouth for chewing motions, the height of its head for submission. I have some other philosophical musings based on my observations of horses-and the mostly female riders, trainers and their motivations-in my area..
All in All, a spot on list, I would recommend western horsemanship to anyone here as a worthwhile pursuit.

Years ago a saw this movie Ask the Dust. It features Salma Hayek still in her prime and Colin Farrel. I saw it before discovering the red pill but It reminded me when I was a kid when I’d talk shit to a girl and it would elicit a great response. This movie shows Colin Farrel in the same way.He treats the insanely hot waitress like shit with quick banter and she eats it up like spanish fly. he’s almost sadistic in his verbal abuse but deep down it turns her on . Anyway heres some great dialog where the baartender who obviously hooked up with Salma’s character and give Colin advice on how to deal with a thoroughbred such as her.Using the same metaphors with dealing with women is a lot like handling a horse :”Well, thought you might likea little advice about Camilla.
That’s real white of you, Sammy,
but I think I can handle the situation.
Okey-dokey.
But you know what they say,
“Never a horse that couldn’t be rode,
“never a cowboy
that couldn’t be throwed.”
And Camilla’s one tough little pony.
She’s got a real hard mouth on her.
“A real hard mouth.”
Interesting turn of phrase.
You’re too nice to that girl, Mr. Bandini.
-Too nice?
-Way too nice.
You don’t understand Mexican women.
-Oh, Mexican women are different.
-No, sir.
They’re like most women,
except more so.
You let up on them,
they’re all gonna take advantage.
But you ease up on that little spic,
she gonna peg you
for a lily-livered gringo
and buck you out of the saddle
before you’re in it.
A horse with a hard mouth
don’t feel the bit, Arturo.
So, keep them on a tight rein,
never let them forget
who’s boss for a second. No trick to it.
Ride them hard and it’s easy.
Well, Sammy,
sounds like you know your horseflesh.
Yeah, I hope so, Arturo.
I’m gonna write Westerns.
By the way, amigo,
Camilla’s one pony
who’s worth the ride.”

This movie has great writing and a good nude scene with Hayek going skinny dipping. I recommend this movie on many levels but especially how negs are so effective on turning on a high status woman. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9aaVOicCVcY

Disagree. Sometimes you need to let the horse free if it’s too stubborn. Let it go, maybe it will find another jockey too naive to ride it bareback. Plus, not everyone can be Alexander the Great dominating Bucephalus. Or Pedro Infante breaking the stubborn yeguas in those classic 40s and 50s Mexican movies.

Look, I get the article, but why not just say this about women instead of trying to connect with horses? reward and punishments works on everyone, the animal kingdom is kind of risky to make a comparison, because some animals are just not your to tame, women are ultimately not animals, and a LOOOOOOOT of this just doesn’t apply directly, for example “Your horse ran away tough get a new one”, a man who has ben de-emasculated, can in fact get his chick back in a lot of cases, so why not let a man tame his target?…look, bottom line, I think this is sort of useless, let’s just talk about women as women and what applies. Also this sounds like someone read the entire manhood101 e-book and applied it to this analogy (manhood101 is the best site for de-emasculation information and training tho, so it’s understandable)

The article seems to be mainly concerned with “riding” women. I believe that the parallel becomes better if you instead consider the problem or taming and possessing. For example, the claimed difference that “a horse that has been ridden senseless is safer than one that has never been broken or ridden before” is just a play with words, but if you want to possess a woman, you certainly need to break her in. If you want her to follow you only you, you need to do the shit work with her as well. You can very well put a yoke on her and make her work, and she will be of great value for your entire family.

Many years ago, my grandfather explained his way of training a horse, that was in the habit of kicking, not to do so.
There was a elaborate harness system (the details of which I’ve unfortunately forgotten – maybe I was seven years old at the time), connected to the horse’s ankles, and, at the other end, to a tin can, which had been cut in half, and the sharp end end cut like a crown.
This was bound in position at the horse’s anus (“crupper” was the term he used), in such a way, that if the horse kicked, the sharp ends of the can were whacked against it.

Again, can’t agree with the ‘safest is a woman with no relationship experience’. No track record = random pot luck, and neither you nor she has any way of knowing how she’ll act after her sexual awakening. She might decide that she’s been missing out, and wants to try a bunch of other cocks before settling back down, or that she doesn’t like sex at all, or that she’s incapable of controlling her sex drive enough to remain faithful. You should always choose the greatest amount of relationship experience with the least number of sexual partners. If she’s 25, and hasn’t had any relationships of longer than 2 years, then chances are that she’s shit at relationships. But if she hasn’t had any relationships at all by that age, chances are she’s incapable of more than a one week fling, or that she’s repressed, or that she’s flat out crazy/intolerable.

I have worked with and cared for a barn full of horses for 2 + years, and my partner and their family have their entire lives. I can tell you with confidence that, aside from one or two lucky points, you really don’t know much about horses at all. And that i can clearly see where you are drawing these statements and beliefs about women to try to connect them with horses and it is just so obvious and without truth. I am not even trying to stick up for women here, just for the horses that you claim to know. Do some actual research next time.

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