Friday, December 11, 2009

No, not those bookcases.Arty and unusual bookcases may work wonderfully as property porn in homemaking magazines, but as actual gifts for book lovers, they're pretty sh*tty. Most hold less than fifty books, and their fashion-not-function designs make any sort of practical categorization almost impossible. And the prices! That silly see-saw design retails for a whopping $1,899! Hell, I wouldn't push such a purchase in the best of economies, never mind our current one. So what sort of bookcases am I pimping?

Bricks and boards.You can buy a cement block for $2 and a six foot long 2x7 for $3. That's an entire 6'x6' bookcase for less than $50! Now, I know what you're thinking. 'But my bookish friend is gonna think I'm cheap.' Not if you tell 'em it's a one-of-a-kind-artistic-recreation-of-the-classic-collegiate-model, they won't. If they try and call your bluff, simply kick a bottom brick and step out of the way. Ka-boom! That's one less present you'll have to buy next year.

Here's an easy post: A list of links to bookish blog posts made by our Inkwell Irregulars. Not only does it save me the time of sorting through an unwieldy assembly of AP articles featuring the words 'book,' 'publisher,' and 'bookstore,' it links you (our beloved blog reader) to them (our other beloved blog readers). Incestuous? Sort of. But this is a cult -- that sort of thing is par for the course.

Pol Culture's Robert Stanley Martin has taken on a Herculean task. He's translating Dante's Divine Comedy, complete with links to applicable illustrations and annotations. And you're doing what? Making Christmas cookies?

Well, that's it for today. If'n you'd like to join our slowly expanding band of backwoods, book-loving belligerents, click here. All we ask is your life-long devotion, adoration, and a firstborn or two.

On the flip side, US magazine and newspaper publishers Conde Nast, Time, Hearst, Meredith, and News Corp. just announced that they would soon be launching a digital newsstand for "the electronic devices of the future."

The Guardian UK is out to hurt some feelings, asking their readers to list their picks for The Worst Books of the Decade. Then, as if to put a preemptive halt to the haters of hate's hate, they went and asked their readers to share their favorites.

Alfonso Frazetta, the no-acclaim son of legendary cartoonist and illustrator Frank Frazetta, was arrested on Thursday after driving a backhoe into an Allentown, PA museum owned by his father. The 52-year-old disappointment was attempting to steal $20 million worth of his pop's paintings.

A clip from The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo film, along with a chat with its director, is available here. Then again, you could just watch the whole film illegally here.

Jonathan Lethem's insane sci-fi/noir Gun With Occasional Musichas been optioned by the producers of the absolutely nuts Bad Lieutenant: Port Of Call New Orleans. This could be a very kooky combination.

Over the last few years, the universe's premier dvd company, Criterion, has been commissioning some of my favorite comic book artists to do covers for their releases. Last December, as if answering a silent prayer by an alternate reality's non-atheistic me, Criterion began selling this artwork as limited edition, giclée prints. If your (comic)bookish friend or family member has ever expressed their adoration for any of these artists, buying them one of these prints is guaranteed to make them your b*tch.(And really, isn't making b*tches what the holidays are all about?)

Chris Sims saved a year's worth of Previews catalogs and sacrificed countless hours that he could've spent finding a way to give rich, Beverly Hills residents those sexy cheekbones all the starving Croatian kids have, all to bring you The Worst and Strangest Collectible Statues of 2009. Bless you, Chris.

If you read The Business of Writing's 8 Tips for Writing Compelling Imagery and still can't come up with a quick and concise way to describe your lead vampire's crypt/crash-pad, stick your over-priced fountain pen in your ear. Now push.

Let's finish this up with the best bit of writing-related advice I came across this week. Guide to Literary Agents has been posting query letters that "succeeded in getting writers signed with agents," as well as thoughts from the agents as to why the letters worked. Steal liberally.

Monday, December 7, 2009

...Cut off one chain retailer, and another will instantly pop up to take its place.

The Times Online reports:Amazon, the world’s biggest online retailer and scourge of bookshops everywhere, is planning a surprise invasion of the British high street.

Property landlords said that the American company, which has a market value of $59.1 billion (£35.6 billion), had launched a secret search for bricks-and-mortar stores to support its rapidly growing website. It is understood to be scouring the country for high-profile sites just as the Borders book chain is shutting up shop.

Editor's note: For the record, none of the sites linked to here -- or anywhere else on our site -- provide us with any sort of payment, credit, or compensation. When we post something like this, it's because we think this sh*t's cool. When we accompany these posts with purchasing links, we do so only so that similarly interested parties can easily obtain these products without spending hours on Google or (gasp!) resorting to Amazon. Trust me, when it comes time to whore myself out, it'll be on a street corner, and I'll be in drag.