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httt? yynnxr TCT'AVTi AT?nTT.Q TTTTTRSDAY. SKPTEMhER 29. 1010.
xirivvjijv' -- ----- w r
THE ARGUS.
Published Dally and Weekly at 16J4
lecond avenue. Rock Island. XU. CKn
isred at the poaiofflce as second-class
Batter.
BY THE J. W. POTTER CO.
TERMS. Dally. 19 centa per week.
Weekly. 1 per rear In advance.
All communications of argrumentatlvs
Ibaracter, political or religious, must
lave real name attached for -publication.
No such articles wlU be printed
rver fictitious signature.
Correspondence solicited . from every
township In Rock Island county.
Thursday, September 29, 1910.
Is It really possible that the Belt
line Is to be permitted to fizzle out?
Over in the Empire state a dark
cloud settled over "Sunny Jim' and
has obscured the sun.
That woman of 81 entering college
does much to encourage the girls of
21 to appreciate the value of knowl
edge.
The way to put down lawlessness is
to screw your courage to the sticking
point, and there can be no such word
as fail.
Let no side issue divert your thought
from the main thing. The fight is with
gamblers and open and defiant law
lessness. Fight it out on that line.
The New York state republican con
vention was an exhibition of brotherly
hatred the like of which has never
been equalled since the Grant third
term ruction.
A New York man shook pepper into
his soup and then was seized with a
fit of sneezing that killed him. Now
the question is, did the restaurant
keeper make his heirs pay for thq
soup?
Then, after Colonel Roosevelt had
won the control of the republican ma
chinery in New York by fiery insur
gency, he astounded his followers by
Btraddllng the platform. Oh, Teddy
is something of a politician, all right.
Sir Ernest Cassel, the English finan
cier, and a close friend of the late
King Edward, has arranged to estab
lish a foundation of $1,000,000, the in
come from which is to be used for
the benefit of poor Germans seeking
employment in England and poor
British subjects seeking work In Ger
many, who are without money for their
support.
The republican campaign text book
contains "liberal quotations from the
speeches of President Taft, Vice Pres
ident Sherman and Congressmen Mo-
Kinley. Boutell, Fordney, Tawney and
Londenslager, but studiously avotfla
the utterances of such good republi
cans as Senators Dolliver, Bristow, La
Follette and Cummins. It is obvious
that if the insurgents wish to be rep
resented in the coming campaign they
will have to get out a text book all
their own.
Seeking to Switch the Issue.
It has been the aim of sinning man
since the creation to lay the blame of
wrong-doing on others. It crop
ped out in old Adam, when the first
mortal offense was committed to seek
to escape himself, by pointing to the
other as the cause. But Adam died just
the same, and since then man has been
but of the things earthly, born to per
ish. At the present hour in Rock Is
land, we find evil doers, gamblers and
their aids and the public officials who
think more of this element than they
do of their obligations to the people,
endeavoring to have the odium
for the open violation of law so mis
represented as to stir up confusion and
divert public thought from the great
offense that has been committed. It
is ever thus w"hen bold outlawry is
permitted. "Look at that other fel
low' they say whether warranted or
not, "get him, too; he is as had as I
Never mind the mote that is in my
eye. Find one in the eye of the oth
er fellow and if there is not one there
let ns" kick up a dust until there is
one." 'That is the theory that the
law breaker Invariably goes on. Get
somebody else and then somebody else
will sue for a compromise. And thus
the main criminal will escape.
Switching the issue; that is the fa
vorite pastime of the evil doer. That
is what the representatives of the
gamblers are tip to In Rock Island now
who, caught with the goods, are seek
ing to drag in with the aid of the
law, the names of good citizens and
thus seek to minimize the real evil.
And then they talk about the "mix-
up."
So when anyone comes to you and
discusses the "big mix-up," just give
him the laugh. There is no mix-up
about it. Open gambling, not only
winked at, but aided and abetted by
the representatives of the law has
been checked and gamblers on the
strength of what they claim to be
their rights under a "license" fee are
demanding that the law protect them
which agents of the law have so far
done and recognize their property
rights, the property Tights of. a crea
ture who under the law Is regarded
as a. vagrant.
No, indeed, the gamblers and those
who instead of attending to the busi
ness that the tax payers are paying
them to look after, cannot aid their
gambler friends to get away by point
ing the flnjrer of accusation at others.
Crimes have been committed and
the law breakers have been caught.
They are known. . Punish them and
all connected with" them.
Hew to the line.
Democracy the Antidote.
Frequently since General Grant
was a candidate for a third term we
have heard of the "man on horse
back" as a fear of what will some
time happen In this republic. That
dread has now seized the minds of
many people through the evident in
tention of Theodore Roosevelt to
make hmself master of the republi
can party. They fear that he 1b a
candidate for a third term, and if
elected then for a fourth term, and
thus gravitate to the man-on-horse-back.
This dread of usurpation by
any man should not disturb any sen
sible person. The patriotism of the
great majority of the American peo
ple would rebel against any such at
tempt and any coterie or party who
would endorse such a movement
woull be smothered under an aval
anche of opposing votes.
There is but one danger to guard
against and that could only be im
minent in consequence of a long war
with some foreign nation In which
a great and successful general would
be developed, without whose efforts
defeat would be probable; or if de
feat occurred he would seize the reins
of government in consequence of the
exhaustion of the civil power fol
lowing an overwhelming disaster.
But there are no grounds for fear
ing such a catastrophe. In the near
future it is probable, that, as the
people gain more power, both the
army and the navy will be reduced
instead of being increased as the re
publican leaders have long desired.
Those timid souls who dread the
future and those who imagine such
a vain thing as a usurper, can rest
assured that the great mass of the
people of the United States will
stand firm for the constitution and
the laws based upon it and democ
racy which is founded thereon.
serious Army Conditions.
The republican party has been
spending an average of over $96,
000,000 a year on the army of 78,-
782 men, and yet Inspector General
Darlington in his annual report de
clares that present conditions are
"the most fruitful source of profes
sional disease." In one department
nearly a third of the line officers
were absent from duty. One Inspec
tor points out a whole battalion of
artillery starting for the Philippine
service without a single field officer,
and one of the batteries commanded
by a second lieutenant of less than
two years' service.
This would seem to be a very ser
ious situation that may at any time
lead to disaster. That our army Is
far belojw mediocrity in marching ca
pacitythough well trained In the
use of the rifle, but the men and the
gun would be useless unless they can
be placed in position in time to be of
service is the opinion of Inspector
General Bell.
The great trouble seems to be the
detail of officers to other than their
regular duties, such as to teach mili
tary tactics at colleges and schools.
An army of 50,000 In first class con
dition is all that is necessary in these
times of peace and with the demo
crats controlling the next congress
there should be a thorough investiga
tion of the army and its reduction to
that force.
.
Illinois an Exception.
Illinois is conspicuous as a western
state where republican Insurgency has
found almost no footing, says the
Springfield Republican. "While In one
or two cases republican congressmen
have been defeated for renomination
because of their standpat affiliations,
the republican state convention was
easily dominated by Mr. Cannon and
his friends, and the president receiv
ed treatment notable for its friendly
regard and sympathetic support.
The condition of Illinois represents
singularities, if one considers Its cen
tral position In a group of states
where republican insurgency is ram
pant. Iowa, Minnesota, Wisconsin,
Michigan and Indiana are deeply in
fected with the ideas of Cummins, La
Follette, Townsend and Beverldge, and
every one of them has swung to the
insurgent standard. But Illinois seems
like a fortress of the old order, still
garrisoned by a defiant body of veter
ans who have been through many pol
itical wars.
FIELD OF LITERATURE
Lipplncott's. Magazine editors would
probably deny that they N concentrate
more thought and energy on one num
ber than another, yet the fact remains
that the autumn issues often seem
stronger than those which have imme
diately preceded them. Perhaps the
editors do this unconsciously just a3
folks in other walks of life take up
their burdens with renewed zest after
the relaxation of the summer season.
Lipplncott's Magazine is one of those
which open the fall campaign with es
pecially meritorious October numbers.
The complete novel long a feature of
this publication Is "The Riders of
Petersham," a stirring tale of the south
and its "night-riders," by Rupert Sar
gent Holland, author of "The Man in
the Tower." Though full of action and
dramatic scenes, there is a delightful
love interest running through the story.
We predict that it will prove one of the
most popular novelettes Lipplncott's
has ever brought out. A very striking
feature is "Thirty Years of Pencraft,:
What It Came to and What It Cost."
This paper, to be published in two
parts, in October and November, em
bodies the literary remlnescenses of
the distinguished soldier-author. Gen
eral Charles King. The general talks
freely of his successes and of his fail
ures, and the result Is not only Inter
esting reading, but may prove a valu
able object lesson to literary aspirants.
Other articles, brief and pithy, are
"The Fetich of the Girl," by Herman
Scheftauer; The Clubboy," by Ralph
W. Bergengren; and "The Hifalutin'J
Hyphen," by John E. Rosser. Minna
Thomas Antrim contributes a charming
as well as seasonable sketch on "Get
ting Back to Work," The short stories
in the October issue of Lipplncott's
are distinctly clever. - "Little Brotner,
hv rciizaheth Matirv Coombs, is a strong
yet pathetic tale in which are depicted
some of the vagaries of the numan
heart. "The Lust of Conquest, oy
Rafael Sabatini. Is a lively romance
with the true flavor of the olden imes
in which t is laid. Other stories
worthv of sneclal mention are 'Ten
Thousand Dollars," by Thomas L. Ma
son; 'The Prolonged Halloween, Dy
Caroline Wood Morrison; and "The'
Platonic Friend," by Gertrude Morri
son. Then there are the usual 16
pages of "Walnuts and WTlne," Lip
pin eort's widely quoted humorous de
partment; and poems by John Hen
drick Bangs, Agnes I. Hanrahan, Irene
Stanley Martin, and others.
ANOTHER ALED0
COUPLE CELEBRATE
Mr. and Mrs. John McPherrin, Mar
ried OO Years, Surprised by
Friends.
Aledo, 111.. Sept. 29 (Special)
Members of the G. A. R. and W. R
C. Joined the family and friends of
Mr. and Mrs. John McPherrin of
this city in the celebration of their
golden wedding, which occurred
Tuesday. There were about 60
friends who came in the evening as
a surprise. Their wedding occurred
in Aledo Sept. 27, 1860, at the
home of Mrs. McPherrln's sister, Mrs.
B. F. Reynolds and they have made
Aledo their home for all these 50
years.
Three children were born to them,
one of whom is now living. George,
who with his wife and daughter, Miss
Lulu McPherrin. also live in Aledo.
On Aug. 14, 1862. Mr. McPherrin
left his wife and two children to
answer his country's call, enlisting as
a member of Company H, 84th I Hi
nois regulars and he did not reach
his home again until June 15, after
the war closed. The couple are
both in good health. Among the
guests were Mr. and Mrs. Charles
Smith of Chicago and Mrs. Sarah
Graham of Galesburg. The evening
was spent pleasantly and the pro
gram of music rendered was much
appreciated.
To Mrs. McPherrin the ladies pre
sented a beautiful souvenfr spoon
and the old comrades gave Mr. Mc
Pherrin an easy chair.
Sept. 29 in American
History
1813 Anu-i iK-mt .!...,- .i.,,.t-r (ieneral
William Henry Harrison recaptur
ed Detroit from the British.
1867-The Emperor Maximilian shot
at Queretaro by order of the Mex
ican government.
1S73 Admiral John Ancrum Winslow,
U. S. N.. hero of the Kearsarge
AJabama fight, died; born 1S11.
Chance For Heroism.
Adorer (anxiously) What did your
father say? Sweet Girl Oh. be got
so angry I was afraid to stay and lis
ten. He's In a perfectly terrible rage
Go in and appease him.
PUZZLED.
Hard Work, Sometimes to Raise
Children.
Children's taste is ofttimes more ac
curate in selecting the rigul kind of
food to fit the body, than that of
adults. Nature works more accurately
through the children.
A Brooklyn lady says: "Our little boy
had long been troubled with weak di
gestion. We could never persuade
him to take more than one taste of
any kind of cereal food. He was a
weak little chap and we were puzzled
to know what to feed him on.
"One lucky day we tried Grape-Nuts.
Well, you never saw a child ' eat with
such a relish, and it did me good to
see him. From that day on it seemed
as though we could almost see him
grow. He would eat Grape-Nuts for
breakfast and supper, and I think he
would have liked the food for dinner.
"The difference in his appearance is
something wonderful.
"My husband had never rancled cwr
eal foods of any kind, but he became
very fond of Grape-Nuts and has been
much improved in health since using
it.
"We are now a healthy family and
naturally believe in Grape-Nuts.
"A friend has two children who
were formerly afflicted with rickets. I
was satisfied that the disease was
caused by lack of proper nourishment.
They showed it. So I urged her to
use Grape-Nuts as an experiment and
the reult was almost magical.
"They continued the food and today
both children are well and strong as
any children In this city, and, of
course, my friend is a firm believer In
Grape-Nuts for she has the evidence
before her eyes every day."
Read "The Road to Wellville," found
In pkgs. "There's a Reason."
Ever read the above letter? A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true and full of human
interest.
FINE FRUITS
PURE OLIVE OIL AND
MACARONI
"SPAGHETTI
A full line Just received from Italy at
F. CAMP ANA'S
1917 Second Avenue.
www.miiiiM'"'" -i i ii ii. , 1,11 ", J""ii.
"For he ssldt 1
. a strange land.'
All day trie human current beats i
Men twirry up and down.
Cross and recross fev.mil tar streets
In their familiar town.
A thousand men go on this way
And pass a thousand more.
Yet none will Know another day (
He saw these men hefore.
(And over the mountain and'Wer the sea
A-many and many strange lands there bej
Men walK they wait, they sell, and ride
Together everywhere
They stand unhnowtng side by side.
Together on they farei
Each day they meet and pass the same.
Each ignorant of each.
And no man Knows another's name '
Or hears another's speech.
(Yet over the mountains and seas afar
A-many and many strange lands there are.)
And none of all these understands
He has no need to roami .
That strangest of all stranger lands
Is this that he calls home
Is this where go a thousand men
And meet a thousand more.
And Know not when they meet again
That they have met before.
(But over the seas and the mountains high
A-many and many strange lands there lie.)
Copyright 1920, by
The Argus Daily Short Story
Driven to Wedlock By Addison Howard Oibson.
Copyrighted. 1910, by Associated Literary Press.
Alf Bennett was sitting nt his desk
making up copy for the Chicago Times
when the postman entered and care
lessly tossed him a letter. Alf was
somewhat new to the business, and his
shabby suit and rusty shoes gave evi
dence that his checks, "like angels'
visits." were few and far between.
Yet in spite of this there was an open,
honest expression on the man's face
that inspired confidence.
He picked up the letter, tore it open
and began readiug:
Los Angeles. Cat. June 20, '01.
Dear Nephew When you read this 1
shall be in my grave. My Arizona mines
bave brousrht me considerable wealth, and
my lawyer will "inform you that I have
made you my heir, but on one condition
that you marry May Grayson, daughter
of the man who gave his life to save
mine when the Indians attacked the camp
twelve years ago.
May is heart free as yet. and I have
reason to believe you are the same.
My lawyer, F. B. Goodfrlend. will ar
range for you to meet her. Inclosed Is a
check for HOO. Come to California Imme
diately. Your uncle.
DANIEL T. ROCKWELL.
"Hang it!" he ejaculated as he sur
veyed the situation. "I'd like to know
how It would seem to be a rich man.
Of course anybody would. But why
didn't he marry some nice woman him
self and have a family of his own to
leave his money to? That would have
left me 6ut entirely. But oh, plague
take that condition!"
Thinking there, might be, .after all,
6ome modifying clause in the will
whereby this annoying feature could
be avoided, be arrayed himself in a
new suit, bought his ticket and left
Chicago by an early train.
Arrived in Los Angeles, he immedi
ately sought the office of F. B. Good
friend and introduced himself as Al
fred D. Bennett of Chicago, nephew
of the late Daniel T. Rockwell.
"Glad to meet you. Mr. Bennett! Take
a seat, and we will talk matters over."
"There is one feature of my uncle's
will that gives me a good deal of an
noyance," remarked the young man,
seating himself near the lawyer.
"Which one is that?"
"The one obliging me to marry a
girl I have never seen. It is perfectly
ridicalou8l"
The lawyer laughed till his fat sides
shook. "Why. that's the best part of
the whole willl"
"The worst part, you mean," said
Alf desperately. "But isn't there any
modifying clause? There surely must
be."
"No, there Is none until yon have
tried and failed to woo and win the
lady of your uncle's choice."
"I don't suppose the young lady like
the situation any better than I do."
"I don't know that she does, but Miss
Grayson had a daughter's love for your
late uncle and humored all bis vaga
ries," returned the lawyer, trying to
bide his amusement at the young
man's irritation.
"Look here. Bennett. Comemd sit
down and we'll talk business. I admit,
if. yon please, the singularity of the
M'"iy i;'lJ'l, '.'J1 '-.'U-. '" iwi"i '
5!
V
have been a stranger
" F.yodns ii, 22.
W. O. Chapman.
condftion. though it seems more unac
countable to you than to me. But yon
would like the money your uncle has
left? Now. frankly, wouldn't you?"
"Of course 1 would."
"That's honest, and I respect yon for
the admission. Now. listen. You have
never met the girl. Who knows but an
acquaintance may prove satisfactory to
both? At any rate, you two must meet
The will specifies that. Miss Grayson
Is spending flie summer with her aunt
who owns a large olive orchard about
sixty miles from the city. I am an old
friend of the family. Leave it all to
me and I'll nrrange a meeting. You can
then tell whether the condition is en
tirely obnoxious or not What do you
6ay, young man?"
"I'll- do as you advise." replied Alf,
who. havlag cooled off. was making an
effort to view the affair in a business
light. "It won't do any harm to see
the girl."
Three weeks later Bennett took the
morning express out of the city, bound
for the l5tt?e station sixty miles dis
tant. Arriving there, he was disap
pointed to find no conveyance awaiting
him and was just starting for the little
hotel, the only one that the place could
boast, when a buggy came rapidly up
to the station platform and stopped.
The agent hurried out to meet the
driver, who was a slender young girl,
beautiful as a wild rose, with full dark
eyes and a wealth of bair that seemed
to reflect the warm sunshine.
"Did Mr. Bennett come on the train,
do you know ?" she inquired in a sweet,
clear voice. "Mrs. Grayson sent me to
meet ber guest."
"I am Mr. Bennett." said the trav
eler, stepping forward and lifting his
hat to the fair driver.
"I have come to drive yon to Mrs.
Grayson's," returned the girl.
"Thank you.'! And he sprang In
lightly and seated himself by her side.
"Do you wish me to take the reins?"
he asked.
"Oh. no. thank you! Billy objects to
strangers," she replied.
"Too bad I have put you to the trou
ble of coming so far, though," said the
young man. stealing a sldewise glance
at the lovely face so close to his own.
"I don't mind the drive at alL Be
sides, I was almost obliged to come,"
she admitted with charming frank
ness. "I hope you are going to enjoy
your visit. Mr. Bennett. I know mam
ma and May will do all they can ' to
make your Btay pleasant."
"So you are Miss Grayson also? I
didn't know there were two Miss
Graysons."
"Yes, two May Graysons. But I am
commonly called Mazle to distinguish
me from my more dignified Cousin
May."
Two May Graysons! It was strange
that Lawyer Goodfrlend had not men
tioned that fact to him before be cane.
"Mazle! She is a perfect little bundle
of sweet mystery," thought Alf. "If the
Mar Grayson referred to in the will la
but half as bright and winsome as this
girl by my side I won't find it such a
hard matter to live up to that condi
tion after all. And yet I don't know
that I really want to live up to It now
that I have seen Mazie."
Mr. Alfred Bennett found a very
cordial welcome awaiting blm at the
pleasant borne of Mrs. Grayson. May
Grayson the May was a nice looking,
stately girl of twenty -one, with a beau
tiful crown of nut brown hair and clear,
expressive gray eyes. She was bright
and intelligent, and be was forced to
admit after an hour spent in ber com
pany that there was nothing of the
mining camp style In ber manners.
He liked ber very well. too. and might
bave fallen in lore with ber If be bad
not, met Mazie first. Bright, merry
Mazie I She charmed blm more and
more as days and weeks went by.
And yet she studied to avoid bimMn
every possible way. and she succeeded
almost always In forcing blm into the
company of her cousin, thus escaping
any marked attention be might wish
to pay to herself. '
But this scheming on her part did
not lead young Bennett to bestow any
. warmer affection on Miss May. Ere
long be made the discovery that bla
life would be an intolerable failure if
be was obliged to live it without Ma
rie. The struggle between this love
and the desire to gain possession of
bis deceased uncle's wealth was over,
I and as be arose. one morning be an
nounced to himself. '
"May Grayson 'may bave balf the
money and the orphan asylum the oth-'
i er balf for all I care! I'll be true to
the love that baa crept into my heart.
IH marry Mazle if I can win ber.
With ber ijy my side X shall be brave
and strong enough to earn my own
wealth."
Having thus decided in bis own
mind, the young maa set out for a
troll tbrouffh the pretty little meadow.
Suddenly be came upon a tiny figure
in white. "Out for a morning consti
tutional, Mr. Bennett?" she inquired.
"It is an ideal morning, as Cousin May
would say."
"You are always thrusting Cousin
May at me," Alf returned, with some
slight irritation. "But it is you I wish,
to speak with this 'ideal morning.' I
am going to leave tonight, and I must'
say something to you before I go."
"We'd be sorry to bave you leave us
with anything burdening your mind,
Mr. Bennett."
"You know, I suppose, why X came
here?"
"I believe so," she said.
"Well, I want to inform you that the
condition in my uncle's will can never
be compiled with now."
"Is that so?" came from ber lips in
feigned surprise. "It will be such a
pity for you to lose the fortune."
"Yes, but I have learned that there
is something better than riches. It is
love. Marie, I cannot begin to tell
you bow tenderly I love you. I want
you to be my wife."
"What! After ail the attentions you
bave been showing Cousin May?"
"You are responsible for those at
tentions.' How else could it be when
you persisted in throwing us together
so often?"
"I think you are very fickle."
"No; I am very constant. I haven't
ceased loving you a single minute
since I first 6a w you. Can't you love
me Just a little, Mazle?"
"I'm afraid not."
"Won't you try to love me, dearest?"
"I don't need to try, Alf." she re
plied, looking up into his face with a
shy smile.
"You sweet deceiver !" he cried,
catching her In his arms and pressing
her to bis heart "You were fooling
me all the time."
"Yes, for, much as I was growing to
love you, I resolved not to let you
know," she said, freeing herself from
his arms, "because, you see Oh.
there is Mr. Goodfrlend!" she cried,
rushing forward to greet the lawyer,
who had come unannounced.
"Oh. I saw it all. children." he snid.
shakiug hands first with Mazle, then
with Alf. "I didn't cover my eyes. 1
came unexpectedly on the night ex
press and got here in time for break
fast Mrs. Grayson told me- I'd find
you both down by the meadow. I ar
rived in time to see that you two have
come to an understanding."
"Yes. sir." said Alf decidedly. "I've
concluded to enjoy love in a. cotlage
with Mazie ratber than take Miss
Grayson with all my uncle's money."
"Love In a cottage! Oh. the refresh
ing youth!" And Goodfrlend broke into
a hearty laugh, in which Mazle could
not help Joining. "Pardon me. Ben
nett." said the lawyer, wiping the
mirth shed tears from his eyes, "but
you are the victim of your own blun
der." "Blunder? I don't understand you.
sir," said A!f.
"Of course not!" And the lawyer
went off into another convulsion of
laughter. "This sprite, whom you took
to be the daughter of Mrs. Grayson
because 5f a pet way she has of call
ing her 'mamma,' is the true May
Grayson referred to In your uncle's
will."
One month later the "annoying con
dition" in the will was complied with.
Cancer of
The Stomach
is the direct result of dyspepsia neg
lected. For months previous to the
development of this dreaded and FA
TAL disease CANCER OF THE
STOMACH the patient suffers from
serious impairment of appetite with
frequent attacks of indigestion with
a gnawing, "cutting" pain in the
Btomach, etc- Then follows great loss
of weight and strength and general
decline. As the disease progresses,
vomiting is frequent, accompanied by
blood, and in the advanced stages,
food cannot be retained in the stom
ach at alL Finally death comet at (lad relief.
HoIIistcr's Rocky Mountain Tea
l especially valuable Insvertine this dreadful
affliction. It accomplishes this by preventinr and
correcting early dyspeptic conditions. Hollister's
Rocky Mountain Tea is sold by all dnifrista JSc s
package making 105 cups of health-giving hers
fTMdhHpei
Humor and '
PWtosoptiy
9r 7VtCjKJV M. SMITTf
PERT PARAGRAPHS.
"OTIIING irritates a young man
more than finding that bis father
is too big a fool to take his son's ad
vice. The busy bee may be the emblem of
Industry, but the busy mosquito gets
more press notices.
Being your brother's keeper Is no
soft snap when the bill collector Is on
bis trail.
'A good imagination and a bad mem
ory make the owner do some pictur
esque work when be starts out to lie.
Too many men take the automobile
route to the bankruptcy court.
If other people were only as careful
of our rights as we are it would mncb
add to our income.
The self satisfied man may be bap
py, but be often tempts bis friend tnte
a murderous frame of mind.
A bigger man about helps a bad man
wonderfully In holding his tamper.
Reform has to take frequent vaca
tions to keep up Its health, but vice Is
on the job twenty-four hours la the
BBMaBSBBjaasasasssBS i a4 s
- I'iiait"
QiHte a Rsssmblanoe.
"You bave traveled a great deal, 70a
Siiyr
"Yea, ma'am; I've been over most of
de country," replied Sleepy Dan.
"Where do you admire the scenery?"
"It all looks about alike to me."
"Impossible. Barely some Is more
charming than others."
"I hadn't noticed, ma'am. Ton see,
de inside of box cars la about de same
east and west."
1
Cuts Willie.
Ton must take your medicine, Wil
lie." "Will you do something for me first,
papa?" -
"Yes."
Honest? Cross your heart.
"Yes; what Is it?"
"l'ou take It, papa." iiJ
Exact Lsngusgs. ' '
They say of a sailor, "He follows the
ea."
Describing- his llfs so romantic and free.
Will they say to keep language exacting
and pquare
Of the flying- craft man that he follows
the air?
Getting Educated.
"Mildred Is working so hard.
"What is she doing T'
"Going to boarding school."
"Specializing?"
"Yes."
"What In?'
"Anything that is entirely useless."
How He Felt.
"I'm a little baiy
on the rules," said
the new member
who had just been
turned down.
"What is It you
want to know?"
asked the chair
man. "Is it good par
liamentary law to
lick the speaker?"
5 IE A5)
,.M fOt
You Are Right.
"What is the smart set?"
"The smart set, my boy?"
"Yes."
"Well. In the light of present devel
opments, I should hazard that tha
smart set is tho set that can't pay its
grocery bills."
Evident.
"She has a secret sorrow."
"Has she?'
"Yes."
"Ilow do you know?"
"Why, she talks about It all the
time."
Regret.
"This reign cf graft Is awful." .
"Awful. Indeed."
"Simply awful."
"Awful tbiit there Is so much going
and 1 can't get in on any."
The Child Wonderful.
Willie was a wonder
Yes, you must agres
For a liaby under
Four and Juat past three.
In the public places
He could speak and sing.
Going through Ms paces
Just like anything.
Without hesitation
Offhand he could rell
Words like reservation.
Wasn't that quite well?
Picture books he'd rifle
With alarming speed.
Help him Just a trifle.
He could almost read.
Though he made a racket
Flaying on the floor.
Never soiled his Jacket
Or his pinafore.
Cunning little codger.
Of such Rood intent.
But on artful dodger
When on mischief bent.
Did the honors nicely:
Never fibbed in funf
Told the truth precisely
Uke tl. Washington.
Never made a blunder.
Wonder how 1 know
That he was a wonder?
Daddie told me ao.
A Man of Iron Nerve.
Indomitable will and tremendous erv
ergy are never found where stomach.
liver, kidneys and bowels are out of
order. If you want these qualities and
the success they bring, use Dr. King's
New Life Pills, the matchless regulat
ors, for keen brain and strong body.
iwenur-sve cents at all druggists.
V
i