Natalie

Dear Plunderer(s), I know you saw my sexy little red crossover and thought you had hit the jackpot, but the JOKE WAS ON YOU. Realistically, you should have known better the second you saw the Keep Reading

I was working in the backyard again yesterday and came across another creature of wildlife. This one, however, was less snuggly fluff (click here if you missed that post) and more ‘I could fit your Keep Reading

I had a few other title ideas for this post such as: “Bunny Decapitation and Other Shovel Stories” “Lawn Mowers and the Fuzzy Things They Can Run Over” “In Which Wilbur Tastes the Sweet Sweet Keep Reading

Bubbles bubbles everywhere On the floor and in mom’s hair Without them everyone will scream As if poison were running through their bloodstream Ava pretends to be a fish Harrison licks water from a dish Keep Reading

When it comes to fortune cookies I appreciate forewarning of wealth or success just as much as the next person, but there are an abundance of other things constantly worrying me. The following, however, is Keep Reading

A startling new report of scandal has reached us from one year old Harrison. Harrison shared with The Lumpy Mother News Team that he has been regularly mistreated in his home. “She would place torture Keep Reading

Meet Natalie

Hi! Welcome to The Lumpy Mother, where we never judge a mom (or dad) for peeing in public, crying at the grocery store, or feeding their kids pizza for four nights in a row. I'm not here to add anything to your to-do list. I'm here to help you lose the guilt for not getting it done.