Monday, November 01, 2010

Christian Pre-Marital Relationships

This is my current thought of what Christian Pre-Marital Relationships should be.

A couple of notes before I reveal my thoughts:

1. I didn't think of this while contemplating my own situation, but a couple of people I know who are getting "close" and might ask me about it soon.

2. I'm not completely sold on the idea yet. I'm still mulling it over and would love to hear any (improving) thoughts that you may have.

From a guy's perspective, a Christian Pre-Marital Relationship is him showing her that he is equipped by God (thought faith) to be the leader in a relationship so that when God does tell them to marry, she will have a slightly less difficult time submitting to his leadership.

I do not even have a desire right now to contemplate the girl's perspective on this. I'll leave that for another time. Any thoughts? You can tell me it's rubbish if you want, but if you do, you better supply something better.

2 comments:

J
said...

Jonathan, do you find it mildly interesting that this subject of pre-marriage activity is NOT directly addressed by God in His Word? Sure, there are many examples of traditional and cultural interpretations but direct/irrefutable commands don't seem to be present. Sure, there are many morals, ethics, wise approaches, and proper state-of-the-heart lessons taught us in the Word. But...an event (attraction leading to courtship leading to marriage) that consumes so much thought and time in a person's life; an event that changes the course/aspect of one's life; an event of such monumental meaning that God even uses it to describe Jesus' relationship to us His believers; an event present since the beginning of time; an event common to all men of all times and in all places...I would think that there might be an entire list and structured program for participation in it (if for no other reason than to direct my own young children upon it and towards a Godly, loving, fruitful, faithful marriage). But the Lord, as with many other issues of life and living, has remained silent...we are left to search out His Word for guidance and wisdom. It is extremely fascinating to study how past cultures have approached pre-marital relationships. I believe there are many useful (and a whole lot of barbaric!) examples. The ancient Jews, having such a devoted and extensive relationship themselves with Yahweh, have probably gotten the closest to God's ideal. But the only one I really care about is God's. So I will spend the next week or so praying in His Word and Spirit...(I don't have anything better on my own!!)

So...I found myself thinking about Biblical pre-marital relationships--Adan and Eve--Isaac and Rebekah--Jacob and Rachel--Joseph and Mary--Samson and Delilah--Samson and his first wife--David and Michal--David and Bathsheba--Boaz and Ruth--and others

Each and every one is unique and different; there is no unifying thread woven throughout. An example doesn't seem to be given us...or is it? There is one relationship referenced many times in Scripture that now comes easily to mind: Jesus and His church. And there is one driving force that dominates that relationship: Love manifested in grace.