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This is Chris Paul from the TJMS running through the top stories in roughly sixty seconds with The Morning Minute.

Last night was the Vice Presidential debate and the winner, by a knockout, the Scranton Assassin, Joe Biden. Joe Biden put a foot in Paul Ryan’s behind. And was Paul Ryan thirsty or what? He drank more water last night than Leonardo DiCaprio did at the end of Titanic. I bet he’s still at the urinal.

A Zumba instructor named Alexis Wright was arrested and charged with running a prostitution ring out of her Zumba studio. But I’m saying is her crime really that bad if the fellas having sex with her were losing weight? But I wonder what she charged them? Probably $20 for Zumba and $100 for some woomba.

The latest issue of the National Enquirer has a shocking story about America’s favorite negro Will Smith. They say that back in 1989 good guy Will got arrested and charged with aggravated assault after he had his bodyguard beat a man senseless.‘Now this is a story all about how we knocked some brother’s punk ass out, and the National Enquirer discovered the tale of how I became a prince of a Philadelphia jail.’