I remember somewhere along the way that, perhaps after some therapy, I realized I could not please everyone. Somewhere along the way, I said 'oh well, ain't gonna happen.' I also realized it was ok for some people not to like me. When I saw it was ok for them to not like me, then it was ok for me to not try to please them. Granted the perception with immediate family may be different, even some of them can take a nice long break from my people-pleasing agenda, perhaps indefinitely.

Start right now dude, get on the PC and surf youtube all day or go buy a nice bicycle and take off for an afternoon or go for a drive and visit your hometown or buy a cool model set (like tanks and planes or nascars) and put them together down in the basement while you listen to archived Micheal Savage shows on your mp3 player or WHATEVER.

You're an adult, DO WHATEVER you want to do. You don't HAVE to be with your wife EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY. You don't HAVE to be with the kids EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY.

Sounds like you need some "play time" to me.

Then again, I was never the people-pleaser, I never really gave a damn what others wanted of me. I guess we're all different huh?

Yes Mark, yes. When is my Flippin turn. Making me cry. We'll get there Brother, that's what it's all about, that's what the healing is all about. Time to realize, now is my time, same as you, now is our time.

When we realize we get to have a turn that's when the healing is done.

Hard Brother, never been there. Still working myself. But if I can get to a point where I do value myself enough to believe I get a turn, I would think then I just become...what...normal? Maybe join the rest of the world in thinking I might deserve something???? anything???? ....Maybe put myself first.

Is there something so wrong in that. Putting myself first. I know feels wrong to me too.

Hard Bro, but in the end I "guess" I am worth it, who the F**k else is going to put me first other than myself. As an adult "logically" nobody else is.

Want to solve it for you bro, but I'm in the same place.

Are we worth it? Shit I don't know, but would we be here if in the back of our heads we thought different.

I
agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and
chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole
discretion of MaleSurvivor. I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor
resources are AT-WILL,
and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for
any reason by MaleSurvivor.