Dear Abby: I’m upset that boyfriend’s ex-wife is keeping his name

DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend and I both got divorced about the same time, but his took much longer to become final. It is finally over, so we have begun talking seriously about marriage and starting a family. During one of our conversations, he mentioned that his ex-wife doesn’t intend to change back to her maiden name. I was shocked because she took advantage of him financially and was emotionally abusive all during their marriage. They had no kids, so it has nothing to do with her wanting to share the same name with them. They were married only a few years, so she isn’t well established under that name, either. When I asked him why she wasn’t changing it, he told me she said his family was always nicer to her than her own. I suggested he ask her to adopt another last name of her choosing if she doesn’t want to go back to her maiden name rather than be falsely associated with a family she is no longer a part of (or welcome in). He won’t consider taking on my last name, so I’m thinking about keeping my own maiden name after our marriage until she changes hers. Am I overreacting, or are two “Mrs.” too many? — SOON TO MARRY IN CALIFORNIA DEAR SOON TO MARRY: You are overreacting. When a man has divorced, his ex can retain his last name if she wishes. Some do it because they think it may be to their advantage socially… [Read full story]