Democrat dingle-berries want you women to know that they are there for you! Of course, there are a few disclaimers that should be attached in fine print at or near the bottom of their official declaration that their opposition is at war with you:

We reserve the right to pivot to a different priority victim group at any time due current events real or manufactured in order to best enhance our standing with the preferred victim group of the moment.

We are indeed insinuating that you are too stupid to think logically and unable to thrive without our omnipotent intervention in your daily lives.

We reserve the right to demonize our political opponents and those nasty proprietors of private business (something which, with your blind support, we can drive from our land) by accusing them of the inequities that exist in our very own staffs.

We do indeed believe that there is no limit to the potential beneficent intrusion of the federal government in states, private companies, and individual lives, but we require you to believe that it will not adversely affect you as we are on your side.

Any woman who does not believe that her life and livelihood depends solely on the magnanimous action of our federal government is not to be considered a real woman. (Refer to our contract with black people for evidence that we treat dissenters the same regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religion.)

The DNC, OFA, NARAL Emily’s List, NAACP, SEIU, Planned Parenthood, FFT, Southern Poverty Law Center, ACLU, NOW, Huffington Post, NBC, CBS, and AFSCME reserve the right to modify this agreement at any time if polling indicates that greater electoral benefit can be attained by changing direction. This includes but is not limited to changes of 180 degrees if political gain is deemed sufficient. Read the rest of this entry »