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provide a sense of authenticity, and are used fictitiously. All
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and all incidents and dialogue
are drawn from the author’s imagination and are not to be construed
as real.

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FAMILY
FOREVER

Book 1 –
In The Beginning

Book 2 –
Young Lovers

Book 3 –
Betrayal Blessings

Book 4 –
Tragedy, Tears, and Trust

Book 5 –
Decisions

DEDICATION

In the
memory of my grandmother, Isla Whiteford.

Until I
had grandchildren of my own, did I realize the depth of her love for
me.

PROLOGUE

It
was three o’clock in the afternoon, and Isla had just finished with
her last customer for the day. She went to the kitchen to heat up
some water for a cup of tea. Staring out the window, she thought
about all that had happened to her family the past few years.

It broke my heart
when I found out that Jani was pregnant and had to marry Nate. I’m
sure she was scared to tell her parents, just like I was when I had
to marry Jonathan.

The double wedding
ceremony for my granddaughters was
beautiful, and I enjoyed making the girls’ wedding dresses. And
now, one is divorced.

I never thought Nate
was right for Jani. I certainly didn’t think he would cause so much
havoc. At least he blessed us with sweet Angie. Too bad he showed up
at her birthday party. He seems to constantly cause problems for the
family. I hope he doesn’t continue to fight Jani for custody of
Angie.

I hope Brad settles
down. I know Emma wants to have a baby, but I’m not sure Brad is
ready for all the responsibilities that come
with having children. I’ll keep my thoughts to myself. Emma isn’t
aware that I know about Brad being in jail and wrecking their car. He
is making some reckless decisions. I had a husband like that in my
own day.

I was so worried for
Franny and Harry when he found out he had cancer. Thank goodness the
surgery was a success! And then Nate caused Harry to have a heart
attack. What will happen next?

Harry and Franny’s
marriage seems to be stronger than ever. Now that Jani and Angie are
living with them, I hope they can deal with all the family issues
ahead.

BETRAYAL
AND BLESSINGS

CHAPTER
1

Jani
heard the phone ringing as she unlocked the back door. “Don’t
hang up. Don’t hang up!” she kept saying as she put down her
daughter Angie and rushed to the phone.

She had been anxious
all week, ever since her mother had told her they’d seen Eric, her
long-lost love, at a friend’s wedding and that he was going to call
her. Every time the phone rang she hoped it was Eric. “Hello,
hello?” she said grabbing the phone. It was too late, the caller
had hung up. “Shoot!” she said, returning the phone to the
cradle.

“Shoot! Shoot!”
repeated two-year-old Angie.

It’s a good thing
I said “shoot,” thought Jani. Angie is picking up words
too fast. She hoped that when the time came to talk to Eric she
would sound composed and not like a giddy teenage girl. After all,
she was a mother now and also labeled a divorcée.

She had not admitted to
anyone, not even her twin, Emma, with whom she shared everything that
she’d had deep thoughts about Eric during her marriage to Nate. She
had also had explicit dreams at night about the two of them together.

Four years ago, when
Jani was only sixteen and was seeing Eric, Harry, Jani’s father,
had put a stop to their relationship because of their six-year age
difference. He told Eric that when Jani was eighteen
if he still wanted to date her, he would give his permission. But
Jani married Nate and had a baby, Angie. Nate was a jealous person
and dangerously abusive. After the last time he beat her up, she took
Angie, moved back to her parents’ house, and filed for divorce.

Eric was a licensed
veterinarian. His main practice was at horse racetracks, and he also
had full responsibility for the care for his father’s thoroughbred
stables. He also owned his own home in Chino, a mile from his
parents’ horse ranch.

Hoping it was Eric who
had called she proceeded to take Angie to her room to change her
diaper. They returned to the kitchen, and she sat Angie in her
highchair for a snack as they waited for Franny, Jani’s mother, to
come home from work. Then the phone rang again….

“Hello?” said Jani,
not waiting for it to ring a second time.

“Hi… Jani?” said
the caller.

“Yes,” she
responded, recognizing Eric’s voice immediately.

“Jani, it’s Eric.”

“Oh hi, Eric.” Jani
could feel her heart beat in her throat. “Mom said she had seen you
at Cindy’s wedding.”

They were making small
talk when Franny came home. Covering the receiver with her hand, Jani
mouthed to her mother, It’s Eric. Franny smiled back as she
stopped to give Angie a kiss. Jani and Eric continued to talk for
almost an hour updating each other on their lives while Franny tended
to her granddaughter.

“How would you like
to go riding on Saturday?” asked Eric after telling her he owned
four horses: two racehorses and two for pleasure
riding. “I have a beautiful black mare named Midnight.” He heard
her gasp with excitement. “I bought her hoping you would have a
chance to ride her someday.”

“Oh, Eric!” she
said as her heart beat faster. She never imagined she would ever ride
again or have the opportunity to love another black horse. “I’d
be honored. I’ll check with Mom to see if she can watch Angie for
me. Call me back in the middle of the week to confirm the time.”

“Okay, I’ll talk to
you then.”

“Bye.” Jani hung up
and fell back in her chair in a swoon. Is it possible to have the
love again, that we used to have? she wondered. I’m a woman
with a child. Can he love me for who I am today? Can he love my
daughter? Jani was in no hurry to bring Eric into Angie’s life.
She had decided long ago that when she started dating again, she
wasn’t going to parade her daughter in front of her suitors until
she felt like there would be a future together.

Giggling, she told her
mother about their conversation, and then she immediately called Emma
to give her the exciting news.

***

Eric picked up Jani
on Saturday; they talked about their love for horseback riding on the
way to the ranch. Midnight was everything she imagined, and riding
her was a heavenly experience. During the ride, Jani glanced at Eric,
flashing a big grin of enjoyment. It was hard to believe that so much
time had passed since they’d last been together.

They cooled their
horses down and secured them in their stalls after their ride. Jani
hugged Midnight around her neck before she left, saying, “I hope to
ride you again soon.”

When Eric took Jani
home, he wanted to grab her and kiss her, but he restrained himself
from making a move. He recognized that she was a woman now, and he
was not sure if she still had feelings for him.

Jani couldn’t help
but compare Eric to Nate. Eric was a man; he owned his own home, had
his own business, and ran chills up her spine when he touched her.
The chemistry with Eric was still there.

They went riding
together the next two weekends. Jani was beginning to question where
their relationship was leading. I wonder if he can tell I’m
crazy abouthim.Is he ever going to try to kiss me?
Should I make the first move?Maybe toomuch time has
passed between us, she thought. Maybe he doesn’t want a
girlfriend with a baby.

Emma was eager to hear
about Jani’s dates with Eric. She wanted Jani to be happy, and she
had always liked Eric. Franny and Harry were planning a cruise and
would be leaving in a few weeks. Emma decided to invite Jani and Eric
over for a barbecue and thought she better ask her soon while Franny
was still in town to watch Angie.

Eric extended his hand
to Brad. “Nice to meet you Brad, and here’s something for the
host,” said Eric handing Brad a six-pack of beer.

“You’re my kind of
guy. Thanks,” said Brad. “Let’s go out to the backyard. I’m
just about ready to put the ribs on.” Eric followed Brad to the
patio.

“Nothing like
starting off on the right foot,” Emma said to Jani as she took a
vase from the top shelf of her cupboard and filled it with water for
the flowers. “I’ll put these on the table in
the patio. We’re going to eat outside.” Jani followed Emma to the
backyard.

“Are you ready for a
beer?” Brad asked Jani.

“No thanks. Iced tea
will be fine.”

“Just like your
sister,” said Brad rolling his eyes.

“So what’s the
surprise?” asked Jani, turning to look to Emma.

“Oh, it can wait
until after dinner,” said Emma.

“No,
it can’t. You have to tell me now,” said Jani with persistence.

Emma looked at Brad.
“Go ahead and tell her,” he said.

“I’m pregnant!”
she yelled, throwing her arms in the air.

“Yay!” squealed
Jani, taking her sister’s hands as they jumped around in a circle.

“No, I wanted you to
be the first to know. I just confirmed it yesterday with the doctor.
We haven’t even told Brad’s parents.”

“Let’s call Mom and
Dad now,” said Jani with excitement. “I’m sure they are both at
home.”

Holding hands like
six-year-olds, the girls went inside to call their parents. Jani
dialed the phone, and Franny answered.

“Mom, Emma has
something to tell you,” said Jani handing Emma the phone.

“Mom?”

“Yes, Emma?”

“I’m pregnant!”
Both the girls squealed again.

“Harry!” Franny
yelled over her shoulder, “Emma’s pregnant.”

“It’s about time,”
Emma heard her dad yell back to her mother.

“Congratulations
honey,” said Franny. “I know this is something you have wanted
for a long time. How’s Brad feel about it?”

“Believe it or not,
he’s excited,” said Emma. “Gotta go now. We’re about ready to
eat, and Brad’s giving me the hang-up signal.”

“Well honey, I’m
happy for you and Brad. We’ll talk more
later.” Franny hung up the phone with a smile.

“Just think, Angie
will have a cousin,” said Jani. “I’m so excited for you. This
is going to be so much fun.”

Emma, with a serious
look, asked, “Talking about Angie, has Eric met her yet?”

“No, but it’s time.
I think Eric and I have a future together. I need to see how he is
around her. Having a loving father for her is just as important to me
as having a good husband.”

“I’m sure they will
get along fine.”

“I hope so. He’s
never dated anyone with a child. He doesn’t even have any brothers
or sisters. My time with Angie comes first, and he will have to be
second. I’m not sure how he’ll deal with that.”

“I guess you won’t
know until you move forward with their meeting.”

“That might not be
the only problem.” Emma gave Jani a questionable look. “His
parents. I don’t think they’re happy about him getting involved
with a ready-made family.”

“Have they said
anything?”

“No, but his mother
is so uppity. I’m sure she won’t like telling their friends that
their son is dating a divorcée with a two-year-old child.”

“I suggest you
concentrate on you, Angie, and Eric. Let him deal with his parents.
Are there any other issues?” asked Emma. Jani shook her head.

“Hey! Em,” yelled
Brad from the backyard. “Bring out the salad. We’re ready to eat.
And grab two more beers while you’re at it.”

It turned out to be a
wonderful day. Brad and Eric got along fine. Brad told Eric about his
work, and Eric told him about the horse ranch and his veterinarian
practice. And of course, the sisters talked about babies and being
pregnant.

Brad took Eric out to
the garage and showed him his boat. “We’ll have to get together
some weekend and go skiing,” said Brad.

“That sounds like
fun,” said Eric. “With my schooling and the business, I’ve
never had any time for recreational sports, but I’d like to learn
how to ski.”

“I’ll have Emma get
together with Jani, and we’ll set up a trip.”

“Let me know what I
need to bring,” said Eric.

“Oh, I have
everything we need, but you can always bring some beer.”

“I see you are
showing your baby to Eric,” said Emma to Brad as the girls joined
them in the garage. “We’re going to have a real baby now, so
he’ll have to find a new name for the boat.”

“I thought about
that,” said Brad. “I think I’ll name it Wet Dream.”

“Yuck!” said the
girls, which made the boys laugh.

“Brad’s invited us
to go skiing,” Eric told Jani. “I’ll make some time from work
so we can go with them.”

“Emma said, you
haven’t water skied before,” Brad said to
Jani.

“No, I just know how
to ride horses,” she said winking at Eric.

“Pick a Saturday, and
I’ll clear my calendar,” said Eric.

“I’ll get with
you,” Emma said to Jani.

The boys shook hands.
“I’m looking forward to that ski lesson,” said Eric, thanking
them for dinner as they left.

***

“I like him,”
said Brad. “It’s too bad she ever hooked up with Nate.”

“I agree, and I hope
we never see him again. But there was one good thing that came out of
their relationship - Jani had Angie, and I think she would go through
it again if that was the outcome.”

“You know you won’t
be able to ski if we go. I don’t want anything to happen to him,”
said Brad, patting Emma’s stomach.

“Him? What makes you
think it’s a boy?”

“Wishful thinking,
Mrs. Mills,” Brad said taking Emma’s two hands in his and,
looking her square in her eyes. “Would you please give me a boy?”

“I’ll do my best,
Mr. Mills.”

They laughed and
hugged, and together they cleaned up the dishes from the barbecue.

This is going to be
a big adjustment for Brad, thought Emma. Doing things on the
spur of the moment may be more difficult with a baby around. I’m
sure he’ll be a good dad. I just hope he finds that staying home is
more fun than partying with the guys.

CHAPTER 2

Monday,
on the way home from work, Emma stopped by Isla’s to tell her the
good news. Emma was a little disappointed at the lack of excitement
from her grandmother. She expected her to be elated
given how long she had wanted to get pregnant. “Please be happy for
us,” said Emma.

Every time Isla heard
someone was pregnant, she couldn’t help feel sad remembering the
hard time she’d had with her first baby.

“I’m happy if it
makes you happy,” said Isla giving Emma a hug. “Just stay
healthy. Guess I better start making you some maternity smocks,”
she said with a smile.

“That would be
wonderful.” Emma hugged Isla one more time. “I better get home
and cook dinner for my husband. I want to keep him happy.”

After dinner, Emma
called her mother to tell her about her grandmother’s reaction.

“I know,” said
Franny. “Mother tried to act excited when I told her I was pregnant
with you girls, and that’s when I found out that she had had a baby
before me, and it was stillborn.”

“Oh, no,” gasped
Emma.

“I don’t know the
circumstances, but I do know that whenever she hears that someone is
pregnant, it makes her sad.”

“Mother, that’s
terrible!”

“Don’t forget my
real father left us when I was six months old. Add that to the
equation and try to understand her lack of excitement. Mother had a
hard life, and there is a lot I still don’t know. She is very
closed-mouthed about her past. I hope someday she will share it all
with us.”

When Franny hung up the
phone, she returned to the kitchen where Jani was doing the dinner
dishes. She wanted to have a talk with Jani about her dating Eric and
this seemed like a good time.

“How was the barbecue
Saturday?” asked Franny.

“It was great. Eric
and Brad had a chance to get to know each other. Brad even asked us
to go skiing with them some weekend.”

“Remember Jani, take
it slow.”

Jani rolled her eyes.
“I know. We need to get to know each other all over again. He might
be a different person now. It’s for sure I am.”

“Yes, and now you’re
a mother.”

“And an independent
woman. He might not like that.”

“Just be careful.
Don’t mistake lust for love.”

“Oh, Mom!”

The conversation ended,
and Franny went to the den to pay some bills for Harry’s company.
Harry had his contractor’s license now and was in business for
himself, and Franny no longer worked at Buffums. She was putting her
bookkeeping skills to work by doing the accounting for Harry’s
flooring business. They had set up an office in the corner of the
den. Franny worked from home which gave her a flexible schedule, and
more time for her Ebell Club functions.

***

Jani and Eric had
been dating for two months. Besides horseback riding, their dates
consisted of going to the movies or out to dinner with some of Eric’s
friends, who were either veterinarians or friends whose parents owned
horses. A few were horse trainers.

He took Jani to a few
horse shows where she met a few of his
associates. Due to her love for horses, she fit right in with the
group.

One afternoon on the
way home from riding, Eric said, “I would like to get to know
Angie.”

“You would?” Jani
was taken off guard by his request.

“Is there some reason
you are keeping her away from me?”

“No…”

“Then what’s the
hesitation?”

“I just didn’t want
her to get close to you and then have you go away.”

“Go away?” Eric
looked at Jani, not quite understanding.

“Angie’s father
left her before she was one. If she gets attached to you, and if we
stop dating she might begin to feel rejected. “

Eric still looked
confused. “Do you think I’m going to go away?”

“I’m not sure about
our future. Having a little one around might change our
relationship.”

“Well, we’ll never
know if you don’t give me a chance. I love you, Jani.”

Tears slowly formed in
her eyes. Hearing him say he loved her was what she had been wishing
for. She finally spoke, “That’s the problem. I love you, too, and
I’m afraid to lose you.”

Sensing her
insecurities he parked his truck on the side of the road so they
could have a serious conversation. “Jani, I want us to be a family.
I want to marry you.” He reached over and pulled her close for a
long hug. Still holding her, he said, “Until you let me in your
heart with Angie that will never happen.”

“I’m afraid.”

He pulled away. “Afraid
of what?”

“Once you find out
you have to share your time with Angie that might not be what you
want.”

“Like I said,
until you let me in, we will never know. I want to learn to love her
too and, for her to love me. Please, let’s give it a try.”

“How should we
start?”

“Let’s take her to
the ranch. We’ll visit all the animals and have a picnic lunch. Let
us get to know each other and see what happens.”

“Okay. Let’s plan
it for Sunday.”

“I’ll pack a
lunch,” said Eric.

***

Jani and Angie were
ready on Sunday when Eric came to pick them up. Angie was
dressed in a pink sundress with an eyelet bonnet. Franny was at the
door to see them off.

“You be careful with
her around the horses, Eric,” warned Franny.

“Mother,” Jani
scowled at her.

“Well,
you know how I am.”

“Yes, Mother. I do.”

“And don’t let her
step in any horse poop,” said Franny. “She has on her new white
shoes.”

“All right, Mrs.
Mills. We’ll take good care of her,” said Eric.

“Bye, Mother,” said
Jani. “Go to church, and don’t worry about us.”

She handed Eric Angie’s
diaper bag and pointed for him to get the car seat which was waiting
by the back door. Without hesitation, Eric did as he was directed. He
put the car seat in place, and returned to the house in case there
was more; there was.

“Can you get the
playpen?” asked Jani picking up a blanket. “You can put it in the
back of the truck.”

So much stuff,
he thought. Well, I asked for it, so I better get used to it.

Eric kept glancing at
Angie as they drove to the ranch. “She certainly is a cutie,” he
said giving Jani a smile. Being an only child, he hadn’t had much
interaction with children. Of course, he didn’t any nieces or
nephews; it was not common to find little ones around areas where he
worked. The truth was, he felt a little awkward.

When they arrived at
the ranch they found a nice shade tree for their picnic. Jani showed
Eric how to put up the playpen and then laid out the blanket.

“I brought a bottle
of milk and one of juice. I need to put them in a refrigerator,”
said Jani.

“Okay. Let’s go to
the house and put them in the fridge and then we can go to the
stables,” said Eric as they walked to the house. “Let me take
her,” he said, reaching out his arms.

Jani handed Angie to
him, and she immediately put her little arms around his neck to hold
on. “I'm eager to see Angie with the animals,” said Jani.

He opened the back door
of the house, and they went inside.

“Is that you Eric?”
his mother yelled from her bedroom.

“Yes, Mom. I’m just
putting something in the refrigerator. Jani’s here and we’re
going out to the stables.”

“Okay, dear. Hello,
Jani!” his mother hollered.

“Hello, Mrs. Ross,”
Jani hollered back. Then she wondered, Why didn’t he say, Jani
and her baby? Why didn’t he ask her to come and meet Angie?

After she heard the
back screen door close, Eric’s mother went to the kitchen window.
“Charles, come here,” she called to her husband. After a few
minutes, he entered the kitchen.

“What is it?” he
asked, seeing her standing at the window.

“Look out there,”
she pointed toward the stable area. “Jani’s here with her baby.”

“So?”

“Has Eric talked to
you about how he feels about her?”

“Who? Jani or the
baby?”

“Jani,” she said
annoyed that he even had to ask.

“No, he doesn’t
talk to me about personal things.”

“He doesn’t talk to
me either.” They stood there watching Jani hold Angie, as she pets
the horse’s nose.

“I was hoping our son
would fall in love with some young college girl. Not one who is
divorced with a baby.” He could tell by her tone that she
disapproved.

“Jani seems like a
nice girl, and I like her family,” said Charles. “She just made a
youthful mistake. It can happen to anyone, you know. If she had been
your daughter, I’m sure you would have handled it differently.”

“Oh, Charles,” she
said giving him a little push. “Get out of here, and go back to
whatever you were doing.” He patted her on her rear and left her
staring out the window.

***

“Let’s go to the
back acre,” said Eric. “I think there are some newborn calves.
I’ll carry her,” he offered.

“All right, but don’t
let her shoes touch the ground. She might get poop on them,” said
Jani handing Angie to him as they laughed about Franny’s comment.

“Poop, poop,”
repeated Angie.

“You have to watch
what you say around her. She’s at the age where she is repeating
everything,” Jani told Eric.

After checking out the
newborn calves and still carrying Angie, Eric said, “Let’s go
over to the haystacks. I think we might find a
litter of kittens hiding.”

They walked around a
few stacks. “You’re right. Over here,” said Jani, motioning for
Eric to bring Angie. She held up one of the kittens while showing
Angie how to pet the kitten by stroking its back.

Angie pulled back her
hand as she touched it and it meowed. Laying her head on Eric’s
shoulder, she yawned.

“I think she’s
ready for a nap,” said Jani.

“Let’s go back to
the tree, and I’ll go get her bottle.”

“That would be
perfect.”

Returning to the tree,
Eric handed Angie back to Jani. “Okay, I’ll be right back.”

Why didn’t he ask
me to go into the house with him? she wondered. Does he not
want hismother to see Angie? It’s probably my imagination;I’m overreacting.

When Eric returned, he
was carrying a basket with a few apples, some grapes, two chicken
salad sandwiches, and two sodas, plus Angie’s bottle. He also had a
portable radio, playing the song, Stuck On You.

“Well, that looks
good,” said Jani peeking in the basket. They sat under the tree
while Angie took her bottle and fell asleep. Several times Jani came
close to asking Eric what his parents thought about them dating, but
she stopped herself. Maybe another time, she thought.

At the end of the day,
when Eric took Jani and Angie home, Franny was watching from the
window, “Harry, come look,” she said. They
watched Eric walk to the house carrying the playpen with the diaper
bag over his shoulder.

He put down the items
by the porch steps. “See you later little one,” said Eric, giving
Angie a loving pinch on her cheek. “You too,” he said as he gave
Jani a kiss.

“Thanks for a great
day,” said Jan. She waved goodbye to Eric as he pulled out of the
driveway.

“How was your day?”
asked Franny when Jani came into the house.

“It was wonderful,
Mom. Eric carried Angie around as we visited all the animals. He even
put her on his shoulders when we went through the stables. We also
found a litter of newborn kittens, and we let Angie pet one.”

“I hope you washed
her hands afterward,” said Franny.

“I did,” replied
Jani, disgusted with her mother’s comment. “But I think I’ll
give her a bath before I let you or Dad hold her.”

Taking Angie to her
room to get her ready for her bath, Jani thought. Mother is so
fearful of horses. If Angie takes a liking to horses like I did, at
least I’ll be there for her. Mother never understood.

That night, Jani and
Emma chatted on the phone. Jani told Emma about taking Angie to the
ranch and shared her concerns about Eric’s
parents not accepting her.

“If he loves you,”
Emma said, “they will just have to accept it. How was he with
Angie?”

“He couldn’t have
been more perfect. Several times he offered to carry her, and she
went straight to him. It was so natural, and I loved seeing him hold
her.”

“As they say,” said
Emma, “time will tell. How could anyone not love Angie?”

***

The following Sunday,
Jani and Angie went back to the ranch. This time
Jani took Angie for a short horseback ride. Holding her tightly on
the saddle in front of her, they walked Midnight slowly around the
corral. Mother would just die if she could see usnow,
thought Jani to herself.

Eric took pictures of
the two on horseback. Jani knew she would have to hide the pictures
from Franny to keep her from having a panic attack.

Visits to the ranch on
Sundays became a threesome affair. The following month, Eric’s
mother asked them to stay for dinner. Jani was anxious
and hoped Angie would be in a good mood.

Mr. Ross
gave Angie a horsy ride on his leg. She squealed and giggled, and
didn’t want to get off. He seemed more comfortable with her than
Mrs. Ross did. At the end of the evening, Mrs. Ross brought out a
small stuffed horse to give to Angie. Jani thought that was a good
sign of acceptance.

“Thank you for
dinner, Mrs. Ross,” said Jani. “And for the darling gift for
Angie. That was a sweet thing to do.”

“It was my pleasure,”
responded Mrs. Ross. “I hope the two of you will join us for dinner
again.”

When Eric returned from
taking Jani and Angie home, his mother called him. “Angie is a
sweet little girl,” she said clearing her throat. “What are your
future plans with Jani, or is it too soon to ask?”

“I think I’m going
to ask her to marry me.” It was quiet on the other end of the
phone. “Mom? Did you hear me?”

“Yes, Eric. I did.”

“There are still a
few things to take care of before I pop the question.”

“Just make sure you
are making the right decision. Taking on a wife, and a child
is a big step.”

“I know, Mom. Thanks
again for having us over for dinner. Good-night, I love you.”

“Love you too, Eric,”
she said and hung up. She sat by the phone for a long time. She was
not sure what to think about his announcement. She didn’t know
whether she should try to discourage his marriage to Jani or not. She
knew that if he had made up his mind, she would not be able to talk
him out of it.

***

Emma was experiencing
morning sickness. She was concerned about having to tell her work
about the pregnancy. Company policy stated that once you were three
months pregnant you would be laid off. Emma had heard that morning
sickness usually only lasted three months, and then you felt better.
She decided to keep her pregnancy a secret from work
as long as possible.

She also knew that once
she told her boss she was pregnant, she would have to go see that
nasty company doctor. She still remembered how violated she felt
after her company physical.

Brad was being
wonderful and so attentive. He was proud to tell his friends they
were going to have a baby.

***

A few months later,
Eric finally found time to go on the skiing trip with Jani, Brad, and
Emma. Brad wouldn’t let Emma ride in the boat. He told her he
didn’t want her to take any chances. She watched them ski from the
shore.

This was Eric and
Jani’s first time water-skiing. They were both
fairly athletic, so they had no problem getting up. It did take Jani
a few attempts because she kept letting go of the rope. Once she was
up, she yelled, “Yee-ha! Yee-ha!” like she was riding a horse.

The three came back to
shore and ate the lunch that the girls had packed, while the boys
cracked open a few beers. After lunch, they went for one more ski
ride, and then they loaded up the boat and returned home.

“That was great fun,”
said Eric. “Thanks for the ski lesson.”

“I’m glad you liked
it. We’ll have to do it again sometime,” replied Brad.

“Yeah,
Jani. Just wait until I have this baby, and we’ll have to ski
double,” said Emma.

“That sounds like
real fun,” said Jani. “Maybe someday we can put some skis on
Angie. That reminds me, I better get home. Mom has had her all day.”

The twins hugged, and
the boys waved as they went their separate ways.

CHAPTER 3

Emma’s
pregnancy started to show, and she finally had to tell her boss.
Shortly after, she was laid off and placed on disability. She took up
crocheting to pass the time while at home. She made potholders… a
lot of potholders. She made them for Franny, Jani, and Isla. They
didn’t have the heart to tell her to stop because they had enough
to last a year.

“Would it be okay if
I gave a few to my neighbors?” asked Franny. Emma was proud that
her mother thought that her handy work was nice enough to share. It
never entered her mind that Franny simply had too many.

Isla thought it was
time for Emma to tackle something larger and gave her an afghan
pattern. Emma started with one for the baby and soon the baby had
five afghans, all in different colors. Then they started to get
larger and larger.

“If you ever get cold
at Emma’s you can count on her to bring out one of her afghans,”
Franny told her mother. “If you’re lucky she might even let you
take it home.”

One day at work, Brad’s
friend Alex, talked about his boating trip to the Colorado River
where the weather was still warm. Emma was seven months pregnant when
Brad suggested they go for the weekend. Emma had no problem with the
five-hour drive. She never let her pregnancy
interfere with fun.

Franny tried to
discourage the trip but was unsuccessful. Brad
invited two other couples, Phil and Margo, and Jim and Bev, to go
along. It was going to be a fun weekend. Alex told Brad they usually
stayed at Sports Valley campsites along the Parker Strip.

“Sports Valley also
has a restaurant. In case it gets too hot, we can go inside to cool
off,” said Alex. “And, the restaurant has four pool tables.”

Friday after work, Brad
finished packing the car and hooked up the boat trailer to the back
of the car. They didn’t leave their house until 7:00 p.m. and
arrived at the campsite at midnight. The boys had been drinking beer
all the way and were ready to party. Emma was ready for bed.

Brad unloaded the car
and set up cots with their sleeping bags. Margo and Bev were ready
for bed, too. Brad kissed Emma goodnight and
joined Phil and Jim at the restaurant to shoot pool.

The next morning, Brad
was up before the sun broke over the surrounding mountains. Emma
could not believe that he had brought a rake from home and had raked
their campsite. He had placed a tablecloth on the picnic table
and had started to cook breakfast. Although she was well past morning
sickness, the smell of bacon still made her nauseous.

Getting out of her
sleeping bag, Emma looked to see where they were. It had been dark
when they had arrived, and she wasn’t sure how close they were to
the river edge. In the darkness, she could hear the rustle of the
river current and fresh scent of the water. She was eager to see
where they had spent the night. It turned out the campsite was only
fifty feet from the water.

The Parker Strip
stretched from the town of Parker, Arizona, to Parker Dam. The width
of the river was approximately five hundred feet, with Arizona on one
side and California on the other. Most of the land on the California
side was still owned by Indian tribes.

There were campsites on
both sides of the river, and homes on the other side of the road were
nestled in the low surrounding mountains. Although it was the middle
of the desert, there was an abundance of shade trees along the
shoreline. There were coves thick with reeds where the fish settled.
The river had a strong current from the dam to Parker. It was common
to see people floating on inner tubes, as they moved swiftly along
the water.

Brad cooked, and Emma
did the dishes, and then he launched the boat. She looked up when she
heard Brad call her name. He was waving from the boat, and Phil and
Jim were with him. They were off to who knew where. That was fine
with Emma and the girls, they wanted to work on their tans.

They set up their
lounges in the sun and enjoyed watching everyone ski. Periodically,
the boys would drive by in the boat going full speed, waving and
yelling the girls’ names. They would wave back, content to be
staying on the beach.

Needless to say, by
four o’clock, there were five sunburned bodies. The boys’ backs,
faces, and the tops of their legs were burned from riding in the boat
all day. The girls had forgotten to turn over, and their chests,
arms, and legs were bright pink. At least Emma had remembered to use
sunscreen and had had sense enough to move to the shade after a few
hours.

After dinner, the
others started to moan and groan, and Emma’s legs had started to
swell. The definition on her ankles had disappeared. Brad was more
concerned than she was. He wanted to take her to
the hospital, but she insisted that was not necessary.

He set up
a lounge for her, with pillows to prop up her feet, and wrapped her
ankles with ice packs.

“I don’t want you
to get up for anything,” said Brad. “Just let me know what you
need and I’ll get it.” She complied willingly.

Even the next day he
waited on her. The swelling didn’t go down until they returned
home. They decided they wouldn’t take any more trips until the baby
was born. Emma saw a worried side of Brad she had never seen before:
it makes her love him even more.

Monday morning, Jani
called Emma before work, to see how their river trip went.

“I’m about ready to
pop,” said Emma. “I feel like a large mother duck waddling
around.”

“It won’t be long
now before Angie will have a cousin,” said
Jani.

“It’s going to be
so much fun watching them play together.”

“Do you want a boy
or a girl?”

“I’d like a girl,
but Brad wants a boy. I’ll be happy either way. Grandmother thinks
it’s a girl, she is already making dresses. For someone who showed
little excitement when I told her I was pregnant, it’s all she
talks about now.”

“If it’s a boy, she
can save the dresses for the next one. That is, whichever one of us
has a girl next.”

“Have you and Eric
talked about having children?”

“No, not really.”
Jani hesitated. “But I’m sure he wants to have a family.”

“Do I hear a question
in your voice? You know he’s not at all like Nate.”

“Oh, I know that.”

“Eric is older. He
has his own business and owns a home. He’s a great catch, and I’m
sure he’ll be a wonderful father.”

“You’re right. I
was worried about his mother accepting me, but I think she’s okay
with us now.”

“He’s lucky to have
you and Angie as a family.”

“Talking about Angie,
I better go, I hear her fussing, and I need to get to work. You’ll
soon know what that’s like. Let’s get together next week, and in
the meantime, get lots of sleep because you won’t be getting much
the first three months after the baby gets here.”

“I think I’ll take
your advice.”

***

About a week later,
after Brad had left for work, Emma decided to go back to bed. Napping
had become part of her everyday routine. She had been sleeping for
about an hour when a stomach cramp woke her up. She rolled over onto
her other side. Ten minutes later, she had another cramp. Wow!
she thought, rubbing her stomach. That didn’t feel like a cramp.
She checked the clock. It was 11:30 in the morning. Sure enough, at
11:40 it happened again. I thinkI’m in labor, she
told herself. Stay calm.

She phoned Brad at
work. It would take him an hour to get home. By that time, she would
be ready to go to the hospital. The doctor had told her that it takes
awhile to dilate, especially with the first child.

She called Brad at work
to tell him that she was in labor, he didn’t even bother to tell
her goodbye; he just hung up the phone. He shouted to his co-worker,
“I’m having a baby!” and ran out of the office. He was home in
forty-five minutes.

When Brad arrived, he
was a nervous wreck. Emma called her mother and
told her to relay the information to Dad, Jani, and Isla. “We’re
on our way to the hospital,” said Emma. “Brad will call you as
soon as he has something to report.”

Brad ran about the
house making sure Emma had her overnight bag. He kept asking, “Are
you all right?” She assured him she was and reminded him they had
plenty of time.

At the hospital, the
admitting nurse called Dr. Winco and gave him Emma’s status. The
nurse called for a wheelchair to take Emma to her room. Emma looked
at Brad and thought he probably needed the wheelchair more than she
did.

Once she was settled in
her room, Emma noticed her contractions were now five minutes apart.
The nurse had Brad put on a gown and gave him a few magazines.

“You can stay with
your wife during labor, but when she is ready to deliver you will
have to go to the waiting room,” said the nurse. He didn’t
respond other than a nod that he understood.

Later, the doctor
arrived and the nurse started to prepare Emma for delivery. Brad said
he was going out for a cigarette and would be right back.

While he was walking
the halls, he saw another man in a hospital gown, standing in front
of the nursery window. Brad stood next to him as they watched five
newborns screaming at the top of their lungs.

“Are any of these
yours?” asked the man.

“No. Mine will be in
here soon,” answered Brad with a smile.

“That’s my little
girl,” said the man, pointing to the baby right in front of him.

“Congratulations,”
said Brad, shaking the man’s hand.

“Good luck,” said
the man as Brad started to walk away.

“Thanks,” Brad
responded, thinking how close he was to having his baby in the
nursery for everyone to admire.

When he returned to
Emma’s room, he heard a woman screaming in the labor room next to
hers.

He stared at Emma, “Are
you going to do that?” he asked.

“I hope not,” she
replied, but she really wasn’t sure how she would react when the
labor got harder. Brad sat in a chair next to Emma’s bed. Looking
at a magazine, he held it open high enough to cover his face so he
couldn’t see Emma’s face. It was difficult to see her in pain and
not be able to do anything about it. Occasionally he peeked over the
top of the magazine.

“I’m still here,”
Emma said with a laugh as he took a peek. “I’m not going
anywhere.”

Every time the woman in
the next room yelled, Brad hid behind the magazine. It reminded Emma
of a turtle ducking back in its shell for defense.

Her labor was getting
harder. She groaned softly with pain, but she
had made up her mind not to scream out. All of a sudden a flood of
water spilled out from under her. She sighed with relief.

“What was that?”
asked Brad in a panic.

“I think my water
just broke.”

Brad was out of his
chair as if a hot poker had burned his butt. He ran out of the room
in a flash. She could hear him shouting, “Doctor! Doctor! My wife’s
water just broke. Hurry! Hurry!”

A nurse came in
laughing, and said, “We might have to sedate your husband. I don’t
think he’s going to make it through your labor pains.” Checking
out Emma, she said, “I think it’s time to have a baby. I’ll get
the doctor.”

Walking next to her,
Brad held Emma’s hand as the nurse wheeled her down the hall to the
delivery room. He kissed her goodbye and then went to the waiting
room. He couldn’t take his eyes off the clock on the wall. What’s
taking so long? he wondered.

The doctor entered the
waiting room. “Congratulations, Mr. Mills. You have a perfect baby
boy. Your wife is doing fine, and you can go to her room now.”

He rushed to her room,
still wearing the hospital gown. “We did it. It’s a boy!” Brad
said with astonishment, bending over to kiss Emma.

“He looks just like
you,” Emma proudly said, cuddling her son in her arms.

“Thank you, honey,
for giving me a boy.”

“I aim to please,”
she said with a smile. “But we haven’t picked out a name. I
really don’t want to name him after anyone we
know because the others might get their feelings hurt. Do you have
any suggestions?”

“I don’t care. You
can name him, you did all the work.”

“How about Luke? I
think that’s a strong name.”

“Luke? Our son Luke.
I like the sound of that.”

Luke Mills was born on
January 5, 1961.

Feeling strong after
the birth, Emma couldn’t wait to take her son home. She talked her
doctor into releasing her the next day. Franny was waiting at Emma’s
house, anxious to hold her new grandchild. She offered to spend the
night, but Emma said they would be fine.

The fourth day home,
Emma’s bleeding seemed excessive. Franny stayed with her that night
and continued to change her blood-soaked
clothes. She helped tend to Luke during the night and the next
morning so that Emma could stay in bed, hoping
her bleeding would diminish.

The next morning,
Franny called the doctor, who didn’t hesitate to make a house call.
Emma was hemorrhaging, and her blood pressure was very low. The
doctor gave her a shot to coagulate her blood.

Emma was so weak that
she could hardly lift her head off the pillow. Franny stayed with her
around the clock.

“I feel so useless,”
Brad told Emma. “I don’t know how to make you better, and I don’t
know how to care for a baby.”

“It’s all right,
honey. Mother has everything under control. I’ll feel better
tomorrow.” She was so tired, she couldn’t keep her eyelids from
closing as she spoke.

With Franny there, Brad
slept on the couch at night and paced the floor during the day. Harry
came by the house after work, stayed for a bite to eat, and then went
home. The following evening Emma tried to stand up to walk to the
bathroom but collapsed just as Harry was coming
into the bedroom to check on her. Brad stood in
the hallway as he watched Harry catch her. Emma saw a helpless look
on Brad’s face.

After returning her to
bed, Harry joined Brad in the front room. “Emma’s a very sick
girl,” Harry said to Brad, his brow furrowed with worry.

“Is she going to
die?” asked Brad, panic in his voice.

“Oh, no!” responded
Harry, putting his hand on Brad’s shoulder to assure him. “I
think the worst is over, but she needs to take it slow.”

Later that night, Brad
sat on the side of the bed next to Emma, “I should be helping you.
I wish I knew what to do.”

“Me, too,” agreed
Brad. He laid down next to her and soon they were both asleep.

The doctor came to the
house twice a day, for three days.

“Do you think we
should take her back to the hospital?” Franny asked the doctor.

“No! I have
everything under control,” he replied. He was their family doctor;
who had delivered Emma and Jani. Franny told Emma she was concerned,
but they trusted Dr. Winco to make the right decision.

Emma was disappointed
when the doctor decided to give her pills to dry up her milk; she had
been looking forward to nursing Luke. The doctor told her that she
was too weak, and the main objective was for her to get well. A few
days later, Emma slowly started to get her energy back.

Franny had gone home,
and the house was quiet. Brad sat next to Emma as she lay on the
couch and held Luke. “Do you want to hold him?” Emma asked Brad,
realizing he hadn’t held him yet.

“I want to, but I’m
afraid. He’s so little.”

“Here, I’ll put him
in your arms. Support his head with your hand, and let him rest on
your lap.” Gently, she placed Luke in his arms.

“How am I doing?”
he asked as he held Luke for the first time. Luke let out a little
sigh. “I think he likes me.”

“I’m sure he does.
You’re his daddy.”

Emma and Brad sat for a
long time, just staring at their precious baby boy.

CHAPTER 4

Are
you ready to go back to work?” Jani asked Emma during a phone
conversation.

“No, but I need to.
I’m not telling you anything new when I say; that having a baby is
an added expense. I have two more weeks to find a babysitter or I’ll
lose the opportunity to return to work and keep my seniority. Luke
will be six weeks old, and a lot of places won’t take a young
baby.”

“I’ll ask my sitter
and see if she can recommend anyone. She is up to her licensed
capacity or she could take Luke.”

“Okay, let me know.
Got to go. I’ve got dinner on the stove.”

“Talk with you later,
bye.”

After dinner,
the phone rang. It was Isla.

“Hi, Grandmother. How
are you?” said Emma.

“I’m fine. I
wondered if you could bring Luke by tomorrow? I’ve made a few
outfits for him, and I want to make sure they fit.”

“I’ve got a
doctor’s appointment for Luke at ten o’clock. We can come by
afterward.”

“That would be fine.
I’ll see you then.”

The next morning,
getting Luke ready to go out was an ordeal. He kept throwing up his
milk after she fed him. She hoped it wasn’t anything serious.

When she told the
doctor about Luke not being able to keep his milk down, he said, “I’m
not too concerned about Luke’s health because he is not losing
weight. He might be allergic to the formula, however, I want you to
switch to goat’s milk and see if that makes a difference.”

Emma stopped at the
store on the way to Isla’s. She was disappointed to discover that
the price of goat’s milk was double what she paid for his formula.

Isla was happy to see
Luke. “Aren’t you getting to be a big boy,” she said. “Come
here and let Grandmother hold you.” Emma handed Luke to Isla.
“Let’s go in the kitchen. I just made some fresh lemonade,”
said Isla. While they drank their lemonade, Luke sat in Isla’s lap
content.

As they visited, Emma
told Isla she was going back to work but hated the thought of leaving
Luke with a stranger.

“Why don’t you let
me take care of him?” asked Isla.

“Really?” said Emma
surprised at the offer.

“I get up early, and
it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“What about your
customers?”

“When Jani had Angie,
I wasn’t able to do it because I had a lot of customers at the
time. I don’t have a large clientele now. My eyes are getting
tired, and I haven’t taken on anyone new. I can schedule my clients
during Luke’s naps.”

“Grandmother that
would be wonderful! Are you sure?”

“Yes. I have already
given it some thought. I would enjoy taking care of Luke. It would
give me purpose, and I would love the company.”

She threw her arms
around her grandmother and Luke at the same time. “You have
answered my prayers. This will give me such peace of mind.”

***

The Saturday before
Emma returned to work, Brad, Luke, and Emma went to Isla’s. They
bought a playpen for Luke and enough diapers for a week. Isla had
already bought a diaper pail, and she told Emma she would wash the
diapers and maintain a clean supply at her house. As Emma went over
Luke’s routine she realized what a Godsend her grandmother was.

Emma was nervous as she
got ready for her first day back to work. As much as she went through
the plan in her head, actually getting Luke ready was more time
consuming than she had anticipated. As she was taking Luke to the car
he spit up on her new dress. Goat’s milk had a
stench that couldn’t be wiped out. Emma rushed back into the house.
She put Luke down, and he cried for the whole time it took her to
change her clothes. Then she was off again - but running late.

Thank goodness Isla was
at the door waiting. “Sorry Grandmother, I’m running behind
schedule. He spit up on me, and I had to change
my clothes,” said Emma handing Luke off to Isla and walking
backward to the car. Taking a deep breath she
backed her car out the driveway.

How do mothers do
this? she wondered. She thought of Jani and how she managed to
hold down her job at the bank. Of course, she
lived with their parents, and Franny was there to help out. Then she
remembered that in the beginning Jani had been married to Nate, who
was no help at all. Thinking about all that Jani had to put up with,
she had a new admiration for her sister.

As she drove to work,
she thought, How lucky Mom was to be able to stay home with Jani
and me. I hope someday I can do the same.

By the end of the week,
Emma was exhausted, and her house was a mess. There were clothes all
over the place as she had to change again after another early morning
spit-up incident. Dirty dishes were still in the sink, left from the
night before because she had collapsed in bed
right after dinner.

Emma had planned to pay
Isla for taking care of Luke, but she was so glad it was Friday that
she forgot. How could I forget that? she wondered. I’ll
give her some money on Monday.

Yeah, the weekend is
here, thought Emma. I need to get caught up on my housework.
Luke was on an early morning schedule so sleeping in was not an
option. I’m so tired. Maybe Ican grab a nap with him in
the afternoon.

“Let’s take Luke
and go visit Jim and Bev,” suggested Brad.

“I can’t go
anywhere. I have to wash clothes, clean the house, go grocery
shopping, and then get ready to go to work on Monday.”

“We haven’t gone
anywhere since you’ve had the baby,” said Brad. “Can’t you
let any of those things go for now?”

“I wish I could, but
I’m already behind.” She heard Luke crying as he woke up from his
morning nap. “You can go if you want but I have to get the baby and
start the wash.”

Brad helped with
grocery shopping but that was about it. Emma didn’t ask or expect
him to help with cleaning the house or the wash. She felt that was
all her responsibility. By the end of the third week, life began to
settle down. Emma had a daily routine that was working for her, but
she had little time for Brad.