Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Tonight on Dancing With The Stars was Bollywood night. Channel 7 had been promoting it big all week, concluding with a huge coloured picture of Anh Do and Luda in today's Daily Telegraph wearing Indian clothes.

Darryl opened the show wearing his suit, clearly he was not going to get in an Indian maharajah outfit. He did his usual dull opening patter. If someone can explain to me the joke "we need a fast show because of climate change" I'll send a Kevin Rudd chocolate in the mail. Or you can vote twice in this weeks poll whichever you prefer.

Then Sonia Kruger entered in a silver Carla Zampatti dress which was meant to be sariesque and she had a bindi on forehead. After a quick bollywood type dance they chatted and of course did the usual Myer plug.

Ok I thought bring on Bollywood night. Then nothing - it was the foxtrot, pasedoble, and waltz. Where was the melodramatic indian dancing to cheesy songs. Was Bollywood night just eating curries in the green room? At one stage after the Tango I would have been happy to have had Tania Zaetta (our very own Aussie Bollywood star) as guest judge.

Then we had the special guest dancers - were they going to be an indian dance troupe??? No it was four kids from the musical Billy Elliott who Darryl patronised both verbally and physically. Still no Bollywood.

Then finally at the 11th hour we had the number we had been waiting for a Bollywood number. A three minute dance number by all the remaining contestants which would take up 50% of their score this week. That was Bollywood night. I think Channel 7 have redefined the term anti-climatic (that was not a climate change joke Darryl.)

I cannot wait for hip-hop night where Darryl will wear his suit with a baseball cap, Sonia will wear pants with her underpants sticking out, and then the contestants will dance the samba, salsa, and pride of erin.

Anyway back to the show.

James Courtney and Olya were first out with the Foxtrot. After last weeks poor routine due to lack of practise they needed to come up with a winner.

Alas there was poor acting at the beginning combined with a boring one paced dance. James, who I normally think is great looked gawky. Judges agreed and gave it 20.

Mark Beretta and Linda danced the Rumba. I thought it was their best routine yet. Mark did not do much but stand their and make poses, but it worked for me there did seem to be some passion or intensity between the two.

The judges all complained about the technique. Apparently the Rumba has a lot of hip action. I don't think the people at home care about technique we just want to be entertained. So it technically wasn't a rumba big deal. He was given 24.

This show really needs to cut the judges down. Everyone of them when critiquing Mark's routine said the same thing. It drags to show out too much.

Sandro and Patti danced the Pasedoble - they were clearly shaken by being in the bottom two. Behind the I'm just a sweet old lady act is a very competitive person. They admit to actively campaigning for people to vote for them.

Sandro was wearing the bolero jacket sans shirt. Is it illegal for men to have chest hair on this program. Mark Beretta was not sporting any nor was Sandro. Again if anyone can spot a chest hair before the end of the series a Kevin Rudd choc will be sent their way.

Judges loved their routine, because Patti showed a different side to her ie. she did not smile therefore she was being intense and gave her a high 32.

Bridie and Craig were up next with the waltz. A boring dance for a boring couple. They danced it well, however at times she was so stiff it looked like he was dancing with a blow up doll.

Judges of course gushed at their favourite and gave her a 33. It will be tough to get her knocked out with her high scores.

It was interesting to see Sonia having to be prompted to the ad break, and to think I thought she did all her own lines.

Anh Do and Luda did the jive. Anh Do played Jeff, the purple one from The Wiggles, it was a lot of fun them jiving to the perennial kids favourite "Hot Potatoe, Hot Potatoe".

Judges were not as enthusiastic and gave them a low 25.

David Hobson and Corrine danced the tango. Apparently David has been very sick all week, and he could barely talk. I thought it was pretty good and dramatic. He is a bit of a dark horse to win. However his trying to show 'personality' all the time gets a bit irritating. I was glad he could not talk this evening. Lets face it Darryl does enough talking for all of them.

Then the final number the Bollywood piece. We had the 2 min intro from Darryl who painstakingly explained what Bollywood was. Hello Daz your audience is not a sheltered workshop..

Then it was on. Well it was very difficult to tell who was what but it did look like fun and made me laugh.

Todd McKenny thought it was like watching SBS "he saw India....a white India". Isn't that what SBS viewers like - their multiculturism dished up in an anglo way. Are there any non anglo saxons (second generations don't apply they have been anglocised) that actually watch SBS? Again a Rudd chocolate to anyone who can identify a viewer whose english is a second language.

The judges scored them and then it was onto the elimination. After James and Olya's poor performance last week (when they attract the votes) to this weeks lacklustre one it was always going to be difficult for them to stay alive in the comp. Though have to say I was a bit disappointed, as he was great value, both nice personality, and a bit of rhythm. Olya was just a gorgeous russian firecracker, I hope she is back next series. Yes that will be the season with Candice Falzon, a Tozzi, and Ben Cousins as part of his drug rehab process. Can it get any better then that?

Monday, October 29, 2007

Surprisingly there was no fear and loathing on the set tonight of Australian Idol. Every one just appeared happy to have enough to fill in the long hour of tv.

They did the review of the Tarasai incident and then did the follow up of what happened backstage after the show with Tarasai giving Mark a good tongue lashing in a non sexual way of course.

How real reality is tv? Yes she did look angry and upset, but then Mark later reveals this spray occurred in his dressing room. Whereas I thought when it was being filmed it looked like Mark coming to find her. So Mark was this faked??? Did the producers go right Tarasai you stay in Mark's dressing room and yell at him then stomp off down the hallway.

Also we need to get Sheridan Tyler weekly tv time, so we will have him in the background shots a few times.

Notwithstanding that I thought she did look genuine, and probably would have clawed back a few fans.

The Arias looked liked fun - especially they got to see Nicole Kidman, who bleaches her skin so no wonder she always looks so pale. I wonder if that is what Michael Jackson does as well.

Marty rocked on until the morning, while Matt sulked in a corner worrying about the negatives on his music career being an Idol might have. I think he needs a reality check he would not have been there if had not been on Idol. Talent scouts do not just rock up to school concerts to find talent. Except of course if it is Macdonald College, or Newtown School of Performing Arts.

Marty again whinged about the format of Idol. This time it was the group songs were damaging his voice. I think he needs to realise, as I have pointed out in previous post Australian Idol is about making money and advertising dollars, not about his limited music career.

How did he make top 4?? He must have made pact with the devil, it must have been a good one as he is the most mediocre contestant to make it this far. Has he promised to poison Sydney's water supply or vote for John Howard? He makes Kate Daruggo look like she has talent and charisma. Soon he could be walking those opera house steps.

However, I think Matt Corby, and Carl Riseley will take out that honour this year. Though I could be wrong. Not unusual for me. In a previous post I say Dean Geyer and half a Veronica have split. NO still together. Last nights post I state Tamara Jaber (Kyle's fiancee) has a non existent singing career, today she is signed to a US record label with former Idols Reigan Derry, and Hayley Aitken.

So don't go putting that lazy $100 on centrebet at my predictions.

The group song was the dull Dragon song April Sun in Cuba . They had the whole of Australian and NZ music to choose from and the best they could do is that? Most of the Idol's probably had not heard the original.

Bottom three was Marty, and Tarasai (unsurprisingly) and Natalie Gauci - clearly a touchdown does not sway the punters.

Marty was the first to be sent back to the sofa, with Tarasai being eliminated. Natalie is now the only girl left. Looking very ominous for an all male final.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Gosh at what time tonight did Tarasai's mum wish she had migrated to England instead of Australia. The judges on UK Idol would not have been as vicious to her baby daughter as they were tonight.

To be honest I thought the Daniel Mifsud "fake" comment had been a bit of a beat up to try and improve ratings for the show. The "fake" fighting between the judges in the previous weeks had not worked, now they needed a bitch fight between the contestants to liven things up.

However after seeing Dicko lay into her, which in part of would have been his anger and frustration at getting poor reviewsin his role as judge for 'Next Great American Band', I thought wow you really don't like her maybe this is not a beatup. More on Tarasai's performance later.

Tonight was Aria night, which meant they all had to sing a song by an band or artist who has received an Aria nomination, not necessarily this year. I noted not one of them picked a Wiggles song. I reckon Marty could do a good rendition of "Hot Potatoe, Hot Potatoe" as it is in his limited range.

Also as part of the deal, the Idol's also got to spend a day in the recording studio with Mark Holden in his role as a producer. He may be an egomaniac but he defiantly knows about voice and performance.

The beef I had about tonight's show, was last week because they were down to six contestants they had to sing two songs each. However tonight because Channel 10 were screening the Arias from 8.30pm it was one song each , and it was the first time all season that they actually finished the show on time?

Speaking of the Arias congratulations must go to the marketing manager of ChupaChups who has ensured their logos were saturated throughout the Arias coverage, clearly they know their target audience. Probably sponsoring the after party as well.

First up was Matt Corby singing "20 Good Reasons" by Thirsty Merc. Mark was all over him in the recording studio, however did talk to him about his vibrato. He used a Warne analogy saying he does not bowl the same balls all the time, he mixes it up, and that is what Matt should do regarding his voice.

Mark could have also said "Mate if you piss off that pentecostal saving myself until marriage shit you too could bed a 1000 women like Warne has done".

I got to confess Matt looked like a rock star tonight I could not say he looked hot for ethical and moral reasons, but he did look great.

Tonight they were again allowed to play instruments, Matt again took the opportunity to play the piano with no band backing.

He did an ok job, but was clearly nervous and did not look up from the keyboard, so performance was about a 1 out of 5, which was a pity as his voice sounded good. He admitted nerves got to him and he did not play very well.

I would not be surprised if he was in the bottom 3 tomorrow night.

Next up was Natalie Gauci with "Boys In Town" by The Divinyls. Brave choice, as Chrissie Amphlett is one of the great if not greatest Australian rock chick ever. However Natalie pulled it off brilliantly, not sure she needed to get on top of the piano, and even received a touchdown from Mark.

Natalie looked better then she has in weeks, even her mum was critical of some clothes choices, however the makeup team oops I meant the Head and Shoulder confidence team are able to cover up chronic acne on Ben's face, but could not disguise a whopping zit on Natalies chin?

Also the big earrings she had on made her look like she was wearing Mickey Mouse ears.

Marty Simpson sang "These Days" by Powderfinger. Mark kept on raving on about how great Martys voice is for recording. This was one of his better performances, but by three quarters the way through it I started drifting off, as it still was a bit of a one dimensional performance.

Apparently Mark Holden teared up through it. What was that all about? Kyle thought it was great and emotional.

Marty said " Kyle you do have a soft side." Kyle responded "Yes it is my midsection". I would suggest also a bit below that as well may be permanently soft, and that is why his alleged fiance former reality tv find, Tamara Jaber, is over in LA, not just for her non existent singing career.

Tarasai then came next to receive the biggest caning I have seen in the five seasons of the show.

She sang "When I Fall Apart" The Veronicas. She was with Mark in the studio, the day Daniel bagged her out on Today FM. So she was mad, so Mark told her to channel the emotion into the song.

The ironic thing was she was in the studio saying " I am not fake" so unconvincingly she looked fake.

Fast forward to Sunday night. I thought she looked great, the hair was straight, the outfit was good, and I even enjoyed the song. This is from a person who would have loved to have seen her eliminated at least 2 weeks ago.

Kyle started off with a 'I know the real you, I know you are not fake, but show the real person type speech' which went on for about 5 minutes.

Then it was Marks turn, he called her a fake, she was really offended, and then Dicko waded in boots and all, and said it was another fake performance, and basically continued to kick the poor girl when she was down. If she had been a dog the RSPCA would have been called.

Then over to Marcia who for the first time in forever I would have liked something nice to come out of her mouth. But she just said " Nothing she can say" and put her hands in the air. So no Sista, Girlfriend, I really dug you type speech. Very strange. Marcia must not like her. Unless they were threatened by pay cuts if they went over time tonight, and the other judges had used the time. Tarasai was obviously trying to keep it together until the ad break which she just managed. And good on her for telling them she was greatly offended.

Was this genuine from the judges or was it a fake stunt to improve ratings, because of the huge reaction of the viewers to the Daily Tele blog on this issue. I think she will get the sympathy vote this week and cling on for another episode.

Last was Carl Riseley with the Little River Band and "Reminiscing". He too had a strange hand movement ala Daniel Mifsud. Maybe this is what the movement coach is teaching them or maybe this is what happens if you stay away to long from your girlfriend.

His song was like a Mike Walsh Show flashback (since I remember the show this would indicate why I cannot comment on whether Matt Corby is hot) it was trite and weak, compounded with some very bad boogieing.

I was very disturbed when I started thinking Carl was really very cute. What was going on I had only drunk non-alcohol beverages this evening. Would I need to call in those pentecostal re-educators who reeducate people with homosexual tendencies. Where they put wires on your brain and when you start reacting sexually to photos of naked men they zap you. In my case they would just use Carl's photos and videos to assist with the brain washing process. So then upon seeing him only negative thoughts would prevail. I don't want to think a clean cut, mildly talented, and socially conservative guy is cute. This is a clear indication on the poorness of quality in the males this year, when this bloke is emerging as the Alpha male.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

In an episode of this fabulous show where it is getting to the business end of proceedings I thought it all a bit disappointing. Probably the dullest dancing of the series thus far. Not sure whether it was the choreographers or the dancers. Maybe the highs from last weeks Samba just weren't there.

Firstly a couple of things:1. Hot - Dancing With the Stars boys take note, you can be a ballroom dancer and have chest hair. Pasha you looked hot.2. Fun - Adam Shankman is so "beeping" gay, and he does not shut up, but I like him.3. Weird - Adults in the VIP/choreographers area sucking on lollipops, people over 18 (make it 21 over there) should only be allowed to have these confections if they are at a rave. It just looked strange.

Cat again proved she can wear just about anything by wearing a blue number that looked like it had been covered in tinsel. We still saw a bit of last weeks Darling Buds of May outfit when the dancers were pulling what dances they were doing out of the hat. That was tres horrible.

I was wondering why Nigel looked good this week, and realised he was out of his usual dreadful beige and in a nice navy suit. Mary was again his sidekick, and I spent most of the show trying to work out if her boobs were real. They did not move however they could have had about 10 metres on Hollywood tape under that dress.

Adam Shankman director/choreographer was invited back to be guest judge after his lively performance last time. I really like him, however Nigel may not invite him back after he kept on gibbering on and taking Niges air time.

New partners tonight and they were to do two routines together.

First up were Danny and Sara with the Argentine tango. Sara looked great in a pole dancer type way in thigh high boots, the choreography was great, Danny was wonderful, but Sara did not do it for me. She was to stilted. The big moved termed the "human pretzel" felt like she was going to get stuck half way.

The judges however loved the move, and Adam went on to say Danny was the best dancer they have ever had on the show. That is debatable his brother Travis was pretty sensational as well.

Lauren and Domenic were up next Krumping. Now I know this is a new form of dance related to hip hop. As Nigel said it is meant to be 3 steps above it, I just found it a bit dull. Also a few mistakes Lauren fell but covered up, I did not notice that, however towards the end of the routine I thought Domenic had half dropped her in a lift. Maybe it was just a weird krumping move. I don't think the Aust competitors in our show are gonna like this genre.

Lacey and Neil did a Latin Jazz number. Never heard of it they keep on mixing up the styles soon we will have the rumba tap or contemporary krumping. Neil is a real cutie however the shirt off look did nothing for me. I love both of these dancers, but again it all left me cold. Maybe the judges are right and Lacey looks out at the audience to much. Or maybe it is just the mixing of two types of dances. Certainly no sizzle in it.

Sabra and Pasha did a broadway number. Sabre was great and I barely looked at Pasha, not helped by Sarbre wearing a bright gold number compared to Pasha's black. This when Pasha started flashing chest hair. So hot. Judges went gaga over routine. I thought good but not great.

Danny and Sara's second number was hip-hop. It was a Shane Sparks number, and when I heard the opening riffs of Salt and Pepa's Push It, I was like how good is this going to be. However, it was like a high school talent night complete with bad outfits, all they needed was a dose of acne to complete the picture. The judges also were underwhelmed.

Next Domenic and Lauren did the Rumba. Again forgettable. It seemed to me that Dom went in for the extra pash at the end sans tongue thank God, that would have been really gross. I suppose they had to think of their younger viewers. I think this time it could have been choreography, even though Nigel said they were dumbing down their routines for the contestants.

Also Nigel commented on how hot Lauren looked. I find this ickey when over 45 men perve a 20 year olds. It is the same as Mark Holden when he makes lewd remarks to the 16 year olds in Idol. I always feel like taking a bath to wash the slime off me.

Next Lacey and Neil dancing a Mia Michaels number which was a routine which reflect her dead father and herself meeting up again.

Judges were never going to be able to criticise it, as this is not The Chaser. I did think it was very good, as it did evoke a father with his daughter, however I did not think it was a stratospheric as the judges gushed. Mary clearly had something going on (as Nigel stated) as she cried and cried, with gunk running down and cheeks and nose. Clearly those big boobs of her are not packed with tissues as she had to wait until the ad break to get one.

Last partners dance was Sabre and Pasha with the quickstep. This was nice and bouncy, but it reminded me of their first routine of the night Broadway. This time I did look at Pasha and I thought he was good, as was Sabre as usual, her and Lacey are the strongest of the two girls left.

Next up the elimination show and Cat looked like she was going to a high school prom.How does she walk in those heels?

First up all of them had to do solos in the own dance style. I thought the only girl who stepped up to the plate was Sabre hers was sensational, whereas the others seemed lacklustre.

Whereas all the boys came out firing. Leaps and flips from Neil and Danny, and a bullfighting type no top just a cape routine from Pasha. Domenic had taken his cues from Fred Astaire who once danced with a lampshade, and Gene Kelly who had danced with cartoons, and came out with a plastic chair. I liked it but reminded me a bit of a busking routine at Circular Quay, and the showstopper before I pass the hat around is..... Also I think if you are dancing with a chair it should be a nice eames number not a kmart special.

It was no surprise that Lauren and Sara were in the bottom two with Sara being eliminated. I predict Lauren will go next week. I was surprised Neil was in the bottom two with Domenic. I love Pasha but he is not as good as Neil. Domenic bit the dust and he should be congratulated in getting this far.

I thought it was over the top the way Domenic was clutching on to Cat, and I could not tell whether she wanted to say stop manhandling me. I still think he has the touch of the stalker in him. How many of the female dancers will have to take out AVO's on him after the show finishes?

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Watching the opening gambit on Dancing With the Stars is like viewing Groundhog day, the same skit over and over and over with the Myer plug thrown in. Come on guys mix it up a bit.

At least the movie had the droll Bill Murray to provide the entertainment.

As I started getting bored with their opening routine. I was again fascinated by Sonja Kruger's hair, if there was an RSPCA for hair she would definitely be reported. It is bleached and hairsprayed that you can almost see it snapping. By Season 10 of the show she will be wearing a wig. Since Jessica Rowe won't be using hers again she could borrow that one.

It was latin night tonight, so we were expecting some sizzle, we got a little heat mixed with some tepid performances.

First up was Patti and Sandro dancing the Samba. Clearly Patti wanted to emulate the sensational bolero routine that David Hobson did last week, and she came out singing and looking like Carmen Miranda. It was all a bit camp in a boring way. I have surprisingly enjoyed Patti, but she looked gawky and unco in this routine. However she still scored a respectable 28.

James and Olya were up next dancing a rhumba. Poor bastard had another car race, not that you would have known about it from Channel 7, clearly they were not televising it like the Bathurst 1000, so he had limited rehearsal time, and it showed. The judges felt sorry for him but had to judge the dancing he scored a low 18.

He may not have had the time for rehearsals but he did have the time to wax his chest and tango with a can of fake tan. Which raises the issue is it a cardinal sin to be a ballroom dancer and have chest hair? Not one of them men (Mark Berretta included) had a chest hair in sight.

Jessica and Serghei danced the samba. Is Jessica Rowe suffering from an eating disorder? She looked like a cross between skeletor and a Cindy doll. It was disturbing, which is also a way to describe the routine. It was sooooooo bad. Forgotten steps, unco-ordinated, and cheesy. She does not do sexy well.

The judges laid into them, and James started breathing a sigh of relief knowing they would now be safe for another week. Todd McKenney was correct in saying it is not over until the fat lady sings, however she is clearing her throat. The received the lowest score this season with a 14.

David Hobson and Karina were next with a Rhumba.This pairing is looking strong, as his theatrics are pulling him through. It was one of my favourite routines of the night playing out the mediocre nightclub singer with the nightclub dancer. Todd McKenney said it reminded him of the last show on the top deck of the aloha cruise ship. Somewhere Helen may have been at that lounge tonight. Her outfit looked like she had made it with some curtains she had stolen from a faded Surfers Parisdise resort. They scored a very respectable 31. I am still trying to work out whether he is gay or straight.

Speaking of which, the camp Mark Beratta and Linda were up next with the samba. He was channelling the late and great Peter Allen. I did love his moves with the maracas. It was his best routine by far, but he is still not a great dancer. He scored a very respectable 29, however I think the channel 7 personality's on this show seem to get at least 2 points higher then they should get.

Bridie and Craig danced a beautiful Rhumba, which they scored a 36 for and Mark gave it a perfect 10. Todd also said it was the best paired couple he had seen in all seven series. She still leaves me cold, however I think she be very hard to beat.

Last was the amusing An Doh and Luda, dressed as Pocahontas and Hiawatha with fire tricks as well. I thought it was a great routine, yes he does dance the same each week, but at least he is co-ordinated. The judges were harsh while scoring for him and gave it a 27.

Sonya Kruger made me laugh when she said that he was the whitest guy in the green room. Channel 7 makeup obviously got the fake tan in bulk.

No special guests on the show tonight - probably everyone is saving themselves for the Arias.

It is getting down to the business end of proceedings, with the competitors starting to get hungry to win. However Jessica Rowe's opportunity has finished as she was eliminated. It will be interesting to see where she goes now at channel seven.

Monday, October 22, 2007

The Young Divas are "brainstorming" around a table, and Kate Darrugo pipes up "I know how I can look svelte, bring on a hugely obese black rapper and get him to dance near me" And there we had the evolution of only one weird part of a almost grotesque routine by the Young Divas, which involved boob massaging and unco-ordinated pelvic grinding. Were they channelling Brittany Spears pre rehab?

It was all a part of promoting their new single another cover "Turn Me Loose" with the new baby Diva the cute and talented Jessica Mauboy. However their voices show how mediocre Tarasai's is. Pauline and Jess were the highlights. Is Emily Williams some sort lady boy from Thailand, the outfit seemed to suggest so. Also did Sheridan Tyler dress Kate as it had all his hideous trademarks of highlight body flaws eg the tuckshop arms.

Speaking of clothing disasters. What the fuck was Matt Corby wearing? At first glance it seemed like a nightie that had been stolen of a hills hoist. But then it looked like the Banana in Pyjamas with condoms on their heads? Anyway he deserved to be eliminated because of this hideous lack of taste.

The bottom three were a shocked"But I hit all the notes" Tarasai, and the other two bottom three regulars, Daniel Mifsud, and Marty Simpson.

Marty was the first to be sent back to the couch. I have a theory on who is voting for Marty. It is a group of wealthy muso's who hate the concept of Idol, who want to show how mediocrity can beat talent. I suspect Missy Higgins a noted hater of Idol, is the leader of this pack, and part of her latest record sales are being pumped into this project.

I was not surprised when Daniel got booted, as his songs last night were beyond ordinary, and people had high expectations of him but he never delivered. I would be surprised if he has a post Idol career.

Last night was a nauseating love fest between Mark Holden and Marcia Hines, which just showed how fake the 'tension' between the judges was. "Oh Marcia what a great song you picked for Tarasai". "Mark I just want to say great choice".

The cynical public knew the articles in the paper were just a beat up. I would have thought the Channel 10 publicists had learnt their lesson with the risks of doing this a'la The X Factor, which used this trick when they faded in the ratings.

The theme tonight was the Judges picked one song each for each of the Idols, and they picked which one of these to sing. Then the second song was a song of their choice with the opportunity again to play instruments.

It was interesting that none of Kyles song choices were picked, which showed is lack of technical musical knowledge. Whereas half the Idol's picked Marcia's suggestion.

Tarasai was up first with a Taylor Dane number "Can't get enough of Your Love", which Marcia chose. It was sung well, but I still feel she is just a top notch karoke singer. Also she has some irritating personality issues like an ego.

When Tarasai was picking her second song she must have thought now will I go for Mariah, Celine or Whitney. Predictably it was Whitney Houston "I believe in Me", which hit all the right notes. She was going by the theory that big notes bring votes. But again it did not make me want to dial the number to save her.

Kyle quite correctly bagged the dress she was wearing, it was so unflattering. Kyle said they needed to fix the wardrobe issue. Here, here Kyle, Sheridan Tyler taste is gobsmackingly awful. Whatever they are paying him is to much. It will be interesting to see if he is around next series.

Next up Marty admitted he was 'lazier then the striving muso' picked a song which reflected his life philosophy a reggae number "No Woman, No Cry". Again his performance was pretty inspiring, and Dicko was correct when he said"it had the choreographic zest of a dole queue" a comment that Marty would be able to relate to very well.

Marty predictably then whinged about only having one and a half minutes to sing the tune in. Andrew G put him back in his box by saying "smashed by waves or learn to surf." I wish Marty would wipeout of this comp.

Though I must admit Marty's second song the Pearl Jam number " I guess" was one of his better performances.

Daniel Mifsud gave new meaning to the word tedious with his rendition of Sting's "Fragile". It made 1 min 30 secs seem far too long.

His own song choice was the overplayed Eskimo Joe song "Hello, Hello" I know that is not the title but I think it should be. Again his movement was an issue, with his right arm going all over the place. Apart from his version of the Kiss classic "I was Made for Loving You". There has been no improvement from him since the semi's.

Carl Risley - predictably got a another hold onto his horn entendre' in his pre song sound bite. He chose Dicko'ssuggestion the Tom Jones classic "It's Not Unusual". I think Carl is finding form at the right time of the season, and is definitely marking himself as a contender, however was it a touchdown?? His song was good but his voice was weak in parts.

The touchdowns are becoming meaningless, as they are not for top notch, spine tingling performances, but just for 'good performances' in a year of mediocrity. Also the way Mark Holden milks them for attention is becoming extremely irritating.

Now Carl's second song "Jealous Guy" deserved the touchdown it was great, and really laid down the gauntlet to Matt Corby, also it showed he could other singers apart from Buble, and Connick Jr.

He is the one singer in this competition who his improving.

Matt Corby showed how smart he was in his pre-song going home vignette. His family had a bottle of coca-cola on the table, which is a grab at getting a post Idol advertising contract. He knows that Guy Sebastian already has the Pepsi one wrapped up.

Matt Corby chose to sing a musical piece "Music of the Night" from Phantom of the Opera. However I thought he was channelling Fiddler on the Roof with his weird outfit. I am still deciding whether I am old or whether his outfits are just super trendy. Again he was being savvy by trying to make his mark on Idol, like Anthony Callea did with "The Prayer", and Damien Leith with "NessumDorma".

Matt received another milked touchdown from Mark, but it was nowhere as rousing as Anthony's or Damien's renditions.

Dicko was highly critical of the number, it was not that bad, but it was not that good.

Matt's song choice was an obscure song called "Transatlantic" or something like that. He played the piano to showcase his prodigious talent, and it was good, I enjoyed it even though I had never heard of it before.

Natalie Gauci was great tonight with "Nothing Compares to U" where her voice soared over the bad, and a toned down rendition of the Rhianna hit " Umbrella".

"Umbrella" received a touchdown. I think she will and Carl will be fighting it out for the second position to be in the Idol finale. Again Kyle quite rightly had a swipe a Sheridan, she needs to get out of the '80's outfits she looks hideous in them.

My apologies for the late post, I was away for the weekend, and had a delayed flight home.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Wade Robson - choreographer, artist, protester, life coach and pacifist. His mission was to create a set solo dance routine which the dancers were to dance separately throughout the show. The theme was anti-war.

The dancers were told to spray paint a word from a list he gave them onto the costume, a white t-shirt with a peace symbol on it. Words like hope, communication, unity and peace were chosen. I would have liked to have seen Clinton, Obama or Vote Democrats painted on at least one of them.

I had to agree with Nigel after the fifth one, it was incredibly boring and at times affected. I did laugh when Mia Michaels one of the guest judges managed to offend the Marines by wearing a military jacket with a marine emblem upside down. The great New York liberal, humbly apologised on TV.

Also Nigel Lythgoe seemed shocked at the amount of complaints they had about the anti-war message. He did apologise but articulately pointed out that anti-war did not mean they were not supportive of the soldiers in Iraq, but thought that no one was actually pro-war. Well not unless your country is the worlds largest arms exporter. Yes Nigel that would be the USA. Looking forward to next week routine where dancers act out dying kiddies in Africa because they can not get access to affordable medications because of dubious pharmaceutical companies practices...

Other then that it was another great show with some stand out performances, and for once the right people were booted off the show.

Cat looked like she was channelling Posh Spice's fashion with the high high heels combine with a short purple mini dress. However I doubt Posh would have been seen in the disaster which was the elimination show outfit. What was going on with the flowery head piece. It reminded me of a spinster English flapper.

This week all the partnerships changed, and as I wrote last week it was going to be interesting to see how some of the weaker ones went once taken away from a popular partner.

Lauren and Pasha did a Shane Sparks hip-hop number which was fantastic, even though Pasha is not the best dancer in this style. The robotic beginning and ending was great, and lucky Lauren got to mount her dance partner. I think Cat said what all women were thinking "This is the only way to travel on Pasha." Hubba, Hubba, Hubba.

Sabra and Kameron danced a TyceD'Orio contemporary number, and I found it a little dull. A lot of leaping and writhing but not much story. Once Kameron stopped dancing with Lacey he was always going to struggle, and it was going to be interesting if Sabre could pull him through. It did get me thinking about the Australian version, and I hope they get Graham Murphy, and Janet Vernon former Sydney Dance Company to be guests on the show as they are probably one our foremost choreographers in Australia. Well ones that still live here.

Lacey and Danny did the Samba choreographed by Dimitri. I thought Dimitri did not look as hot as I remembered, maybe it was because he kept his shirt on this year. This samba sizzled. It reminded me of a number that would be in a James Bond film if it was a musical. I thought it was the number of the night. However surprisingly the judges had some criticisms albeit small ones.

Does Mia Micheals need to get laid she was salivating over Lacey, then Lauren, then Sabra? All very disconcerting, also she seems to have gone a bit LA with the fake tan, bleach hair, and plastic surgery on her eyes.

Jaimie and Dominic did a Viennese waltz crossed with flamenco. Which was always going to be the kiss of death. It was boring, the fake passion was cringe worthy it was like they were acting in a bad porn flick. Nasty, and resulted in both of them deservedly being in the bottom four.

Sara and Neil were last dancing disco to a great Doriana Sanchez routine. It was funky in a fabulous way. The flip that Neil did was breathtaking. He seemed to shine once he had been freed from the charismaless Lauren. He is starting to look like a contender. Also if they do a remake of Saturday Night Fever he should definately star in it.

The results are now all viewer based which means it has turned into a popularity contest. However it seems the American public got it right as my least favourite four dancers were in the bottom Jaimie, Lauren, Dominic (cracker solo), and Kameron.

Jaimie and Kameron were eliminated. No tears from this avid viewer.

Just a footnote I did notice the promotion of Natalie Bassingwaite whose new album with the Rogue Traders was being advertised during the show. As she is Australia's So You Think You Can Dance host they are obviously trying to raise her profile with their target audience.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Our Delta Goodrem is releasing a new album. How do I know that? Well the past few weeks have been Delta on magazine covers, Delta in the social pages, Delta in magazines and newspapers all with the aim of spruiking the album and her new sexy, cool look.

So how did Delta's appearance on Dancing With The Stars fit in with this 'hot' new image? Mmm it was like seeing a split personality on screen. Whilst singing she was channelling Tori Amos, and then during the song she morphed in to girl next door, Mandy Moore. Then she would remember that she was the new sexy Delta then bingo Tori was back on our screens.

If she was going to perform on any TV show shouldn't it have been Australian Idol? Her old Alma Mater Neighbours is on Channel 10. Everyone that watches DWTS is at least over 30 is this the audience she is trying to cultivate, if so why is she on the cover of Dolly. All to schizoid for me.

Anyway back to the show.....

It is amazing how they puff out this show for 2 hours. The thing which really annoys me is there is six people trying to get air time and that is even before you count in the dancers.

They really need to put a muzzle on Darryl. I thought it ironic when Sonia and Darryl complained about people talking in their opening gambit. Take the hint guys.

Put into his contract a word limit per episode and if he goes over it he starts losing money.

Speaking of contracts, what is in Myers, do they have to promote it so obviously, it is not the Truman Show. Does Myer say we will dress Sonia Kruger if you mention our names a couple of times each episode? Sonia did look stunning in the black Carla Zampatti number, or maybe it was the glow from signing on for a breakfast spot on Mix 106.9 FM. Something that only Darryl can dream about.

First up was Elka Graham & Michael dancing the PaseDoble. She has been bottom two since the series began so really needed a big routine tonight. This did not occur, even though she looked stunning it was pretty dull. Michael was showing off his pecs, however with the 'fake' tan he just reminded me a poor imitation of George Hamilton (Is he still alive? Would have thought he had died of skin cancer by now.)

The judges out of sympathy gave them a high scoring 27 in an attempt to keep them in. To make DWTS work better I think they should cut it down to three judges, personally I could just handle Todd, and Helen, as Mark and Paul just blabber on the same thing. The Idol judges keep in succinct and witty compared to this lot.

Maybe David Leckie sends out a memo each week, telling them they have to keep on filling out the 2 hours even though there are fewer routines each week, if so they certainly have it down to an artform. There was way to much gibber tonight.

Next up were Mark Beretta and Linda with the waltz. The waltz is one of the most boring dances in the world even when done by professionals, however done by this lot it is positively tedious.

Helen said with a straight face after making some positive comments " Thething you need to do better is move better." ????? Isn't that the whole point of the show dancing. As usual he looked like a gay man with no rhythmn (which is probably a minority group within the pink community).

Anyway he hardly moved but they did give him a generous 25. As usual they plugged Sunrise, which again amazes me that it is ok for their viewers/fans to vote for Mark, but if Hillsong members vote for Idols suddenly there is a huge religious conspiracy.

James & Olya danced the waltz. This couple is hot. If I was James wife I would definitely be attending rehearsals to keep an eye on things. As usual they were good in an otherwise dull dance.

David Hobson and Karina danced the PaseDoble which was fantastic. He opened and closed it with opera singing. Very dramatic which because of his singing background pulled it off convincingly. It reminded me of the Torvill and Dean bolero number at that Winter Olympics way back in time. And even kept his shirt on which was unusual for the PaseDoble boys.

Patti Newton and Sandro danced the waltz. She is so playing up the I am an old lady, and this is harder then it looks card. Well if it is getting you votes why not. David Hobson is playing the nice funny guy card by thanking everyone in sight.

She danced well, again no comments about her being a trained dancer, however the lift at the end was fun to watch. I think she will win the competition.

Bridie Carter and Craig were up next doing the PaseDoble. She is the Tarasai of this competition. She dances well, and looks great, but for some undefinable reason I just don't like her. A very limited personality. I nearly choked when Helen told her she was a great actress. Helen, Cate Blanchett is great actress. Clearly Bridie is not so great that the only work she can get is on a dance show.Bridie was playing the role of Esmeralda, a sexy gypsy, very over acted. However they received the highest score of the night 35 along with David Hobson.

Craig was in the not wearing a shirt mob, and this look is for hot blooded spanish men not pale Aussie guys. It was not a look he carried off particularly well.

Anh Do and Luda did the waltz. He cleverly changed his persona tonight, to a more somber one. He was dedicating this dance to his grandma, as he was dressed in army fatigues, and three of her brothers had died in the Vietnam war. He looked genuine so it was not cheesy.

Luda looked sensational in a lemon pants suit, and they danced well, but it was still a bit dull. This could see them struggle bit next week.

Lucky last was Jessica Rowe and Serghei dancing the pasedoble. They were supposed to be vampires, but she came across as a zombie. She was very stiff, but I think that was part of the choreography. The routine was quite good, and the judges scored it a very respectable 29. Serghei must love dress ups this week vampires, last week cats.

The bottom two were Elka and Michael, and Jessica and Serghei. Unsurprisingly Elka was eliminated, which shows their facebook support club was not working. The results also proved that Jessica's fan base is not big, and she is not cultivating more during the show. I predict she will be gone next week.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Excitement swept across the couch when the other Australian Idol contestants could not believe their luck that Matt Corby and his over stylised hair, had landed in the bottom two tonight.

It looked like it could be a Steven Bradbury type moment when the front runner falls over and one of the other Idol's would now have the chance to reap the glittering prize.

Natalie Gauci was very bad at containing her excitement as she was bounced up an down the couch with glee. Then her look of disappointment when they announced Ben McKenzie was gone and she realised her dream of being Australian Idol had again slipped out of her grasp was classic. Mark Holden you asked to see Natalie's emotions well she certainly produced them tonight.

Now why did Ben and Matt land in the bottom two? Had the teenyboppers pre- paid mobiles ran out? Did everyone just think they were safe? Or was it a voter backlash against the popularity of Matt Corby?

What this weeks outcome will result in will be the teenage girls hitting the phones hard next Sunday. This will be the one and only time Matt will make bottom three this season.

Hopefully this shock may make Matt stop channelling James Blunt and do something different this week.

Ben certainly showed Jacob Butler a lesson in how to be gracious in defeat. Hopefully this won't be the last we see of this talented kid.

But the $64 million question who is voting for Marty? Does he belong to a secret satanic cult (not Hillsong for once) and they are slyly voting for him, or does one of his friends or relatives work for a telecommunication company. Either way it is suspicious, and needs to be investigated.

The Idol producers must also think this years Idol's are duds, by introducing James, and Andrew G into the chorus of the group routine, a medley of I Shot the Sheriff, and Psycho Killer to give it some entertainment value. Until they chimed in I was thinking this is the worst group song I had seen in the five seasons of the show.

James Mathison is just hilarious, with superb comic time . It will be interesting to see him act in his new sitcom which has just been commissioned by Channel Ten.

However James did let slip that he knew who the final three already were by eluding to the fact that after Matt Corby was up, that there was more shocks to come.

It was also worth the admission price alone to see the judges faces when presented with the two talented young boys, they knew a lame Aust Idol was about to get worse.

Reality Raver who had thought there had been a Nostradamus prophecy foretelling that Ben and Matt would be at the Sydney Opera House will now have to examine her crystal ball to see who will be joining Matt for that auspicious occasion. If Natalie can pull out a show stopper in the next two weeks, I think it will be her.

It was the first time in this series there had been real excitement on the show sadly the collateral damage was the elimination of the musical Ben McKenzie.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

With the Federal election date finally being called, I decided that tonight's Idol may be a sign of what the upcoming campaign would be like. Would it be entertaining, provocative, and full of talent? Or would it be dull, uninspiring, and full of medocrity.

Unfortunately it was the latter.

The mission for tonight was to pick a song from the year you were born. Which was all '80's and a couple songs from 1990. I think if the Idol producers take a lesson from tonight is to not bother have a 80's night this season.

The performances tonight were ordinary. You knew it was crap when Marcia "I dug it" Hines was joining in on the criticism. Was it the song choice or is it the performer? This years lot are making Lee Harding look talented, which is as hard as making George Dubya look smart.

The highlight of the evening for me was finding out Australian Idol merchandise is now in Happy Meals in Macdonalds. It is an improvement on Teenage Turtle Ninja Turtles and Shrek figurines.

First up was Ben McKenzie singing a song from 1990, Higher Ground by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers, which is in fact a Stevie Wonder cover from 1973. Which raises the issue of the rules for picking songs. If you can find anyone releasing a cover in the year you were born eg a band from Greenland releases a quirky version of a Beatles song like Eleanor Rigby, should you be allowed to sing it?

I don't, Idol needs to beat the credibility stick (that probably is an oxymoron) and say only an original song from that year can be covered.

Ben was obviously trying to woo some of Matt Corby's prolific voters to his camp(no pun intended) by doing the big stare down the camera, however the song just did not seem to suit his voice. Also the band seemed to over power him, it was like a mouse squeaking over the roar of a lion.

He did do better then most this evening with two judges liking it, Marcia, and Kyle, with Dicko and Mark finding it ordinary.

Marty Simpson sang from 1986 "Now We'are Getting Somewhere" by Crowded House. I loved the way during the song the cameraman panned to Lana sitting in the audience, just to imply they are indeed an item. I thought she was doing the HSC at the moment.

To show where his interests really lie he turned it into a reggae version, and a pretty lame one at that. The judges are always going on about showing your personality to the Idols, he needs to take the Scientology Test and ask them if he has a personality because I ain't seeing signs of it.

Also the Government did not have to waste of taxpayers funds on the leaflet called " Talk To Your Children About Drugs" when it would have been much more effective in just taking Marty into schools to show kids this is what happens when you indulge in to many drugs. I have seen people with lobotomies show more life.

He then had the predictable whinge about he needs to show case he is more comfortable singing his original songs. This is not Triple J Unearthed the whole point of the show is covers. It is the equivalent of wanting a pig on a spit at a Hare Krishna feast. I am hoping he is around for original night, as he will then have no excuses for a shite performance.

Natalie Gauci sang "Endless Love" by Diana Ross and Lionel Ritchie from 1981. I have lost count of the number of times I have heard this mangled at karoke bars. It is even worse when a boyfriend/girlfriend do it as a serious number.

However I have to confess this song is in my top ten of guilty pleasures. Even though the judges panned it I loved it. It is so cheesy but in a good way. At one stage during the performance I deludedly said to my couch companion "ooh this may be a touchdown", he looked at me like I needed to be committed. He may have been right.

The outfit she wore tonight was shocking. She needs to start screaming every time Sheridan Tyler comes near her. Dicko said that was the third outfit change of the night. Just hold on dear reader as I go off and start a "Sack Sheridan Tyler from Idol" Facebook Group.....

Back from that frivolity, next up was Carl Risley singing "Turn Your Love Around" by George Benson from 1982.

Carl's girlfriend was in the audience, and Andrew G interviewed her. She confessed to them meeting pissed at the Melbourne Cup. I was very surprised at Andrew's restraint by not asking any horn questions. She needed to take a tip from the Jacob Butlers savvier girlfriend, and get her hair done, and a bit of lippy would not have hurt. As there are over 1 million viewers looking at you and probably half are bitchy teenage girls, and the other half jaded 30 something female bloggers she was always going to cop a caning.

The positives about Carl are he shaves, he is not 17, and he looks good in a suit. Other then that his performance was dullsville. I have seen better entertainment at recent political fundraisers and that is a big call.

Matt Corby sang a Phil Collins from 1990 "Another Day In Paradise". Which ever political party promises to ban Phil Collin songs from the airwaves has my vote. Even the mega talented Matt Corby could not do anything palatable with it and I was so bored I was wondering whether he styled his eyebrows. Yes I was focusing on the big issues!

I do think he is clever doing the old sit on the chair trick so people cannot see what a crap dancer he is, something that Daniel Mifsud should think about doing.

The judges were uncontrollably name dropping. Dicko mentioned Kevin Rudd. Is he thinking politics post Idol? Also Marcia dropped her daughters name Deni Hines in the same breath as Randy Crawford, saying they both had great careers from vibrato. As far as I am concerned her most recent career highlight was being a fame game question on Temptation last week. I live in fear we are going to see her perform on a Monday night show this year, something that Marcia insisted on in her contract renewal.

Tarasai (she who can get away with one name) sang a 1987 Aretha Franklin/George Michael duet "I Knew You Were Waiting For Me". It was the best performance of the evening. Hitting the high notes great strutting about on stage, would I pick up the phone - No. She annoys me.

Dicko said " You don't over think things" Is he telling her she is thick?

However she will be safe for another week.

Daniel Mifsud got the coveted last spot to sing "Billie Jean" from Michael Jackson from 1983. As written previously he needs to take a leaf out of Matt Corby's book and sit on a chair. Every time he dances he just looks like a dickhead, and completely uncool. Which is bizarre for a person who is desperate to show how cool he is.

How do you sing a song by someone whose voice has barely broken? By this time all the judges looked like they wanted to be put out of their misery, and could barely muster any enthusiasm for his tedious rendition.

After the fantastic performers from last year, this season has been extremely disappointing. Was the talent not out there, or did the judges give us a poor 24 contenders, with the ones who made the final 12 barely improving on their semi final wins.

Has the Hillsong Church claimed another victim? It has been reported in the Daily Tele that Dean Geyer and Lisa Orgliasso from The Veronicas appeared to have had a cooling in relations.

Could it be they do not see eye to eye over the pentecostal influence over this years Australian Idol? As we know Dean is an out and proud member of that club. Or if Lisa just decided to dump him because he would not break his vow of saving his virginity until he married.

As I posted previously Matt Corby future girlfriend better snaffle him up quick as it is official a Veronica is on the loose.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Tonight's episode provided extra tension because each year the top 10 dancers get to do the end of series tour. There were more tears, high anxiety, and a greater sense of relief once the dancers were through.

However firstly a couple of things:1. Did Arnie bring in a law when he was voted in the Governor of California that all citizens must have bleached straighten teeth otherwise you are kicked off TV land. Damien Leith would not have made past the first audition over there.

2. Could someone tell Nigel's stylist that he should not be put in suits that are the same colour as his skin and hair colour, it is to much beige

The night kicked off with a swing type number to Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy. It was a lot of fun, and Lacey especially looked like she was enjoying herself.

Then Cat came out in high heels, and a top in the colour dejour of the season coral, but hang on where were the pants? What that is a dress - hopefully she won't bend to hug the diminutive Sabra otherwise there is going to be issues, especially if she is wearing a g-string (thong in their vernacular).

Judges of the night were Nigel Lythgoe, Mary Murphy (who looked like she had been eating to many tamales), and Wade Robson who I have just raved about in the previous post.

First up was Sabra with the jive.This routine was dynamite lots of energy, all eyes were on pocket rocket Sabra, but Dominic is doing ok for someone untrained. Maybe he can attend the over promoted, and I suspect over hyped Debbie Allen Dance Academy with Cedric.

In the pre-routine gambit it was revealed that Dominic drops Sabra a lot in rehearsal. In fact he has also dropped her once in the pre -recorded opening number of the show and could not continue. Lucky for him she is a former gymnast and she has probably had worse falls from the beam whilst doing a triple somersault dismount.

I think she is his good luck charm as she is pretty versatile. It will be interesting to see what is going to happen once they swap partners, I think he will struggle to stay in the competition then.

Next up were Hok and Jaimie with a Broadway number to Mr Bojangles. Normally I like a TyceDorio number but tonight it lacked his usual pizazz. Hok did plies all around the stage while, Jaimie ran around leaping and with lots of high kicks. It was tonight revealed Jaimie is also trained by Travis, and Danny's mother who is clearly the greatest dance teacher in the world. Move over Debbie Allan.

Speaking of Travis,(season 2's runner up) he was assisting Tyce with this number. He also looked like he had had an accident with the bleach bottle. Nigel, who clearly is addicted to the stuff, probably even does his pubes, must write into their contracts that at least one body area must be whitened.

Pasha and Sarah danced Jazz. It was weird funky number, which was definitely channelling the '80's with the fluro clothes and dance moves. I kept thinking Fame and Flash Dance, then low and behold next ad break there is Jennifer Beales coming up in a Law and Order episode. Speaking of ad breaks, and I apologise for being off topic, but what has happened to Sandra Sully? Has she been on one of those cheap plastic surgery trips to Thailand? The medico who did her eyes should be deregistered.

Neil and Lauren danced a Mia Michaelschoreographedcontemporary number. Again I love her work she does these weird pieces that are very evocative.

Nigel and Mary didn't understand the story of the dance. I thought that was the whole point of contemporary. The dancers when asked did not really know and said it could be anything you wanted it to be. Well I thought it was about two people escaping from the Clockwork Orange set. Now that was one weird film and I must look up Wikepedia and find out what it was actually about.

One of the things that mystifies me is how Mia Michaels gets her complex choreography across, as she is not the lithe dancer she once was. However what ever she does it works, as I gather she is a bit of a icon in dance circles.

Danny and Anya danced a Foxtrot. This was a Fred and Ginger type dance - ethereal and floaty, with lots of feathers on Anya dress. They did a great job with it. However these ballroom numbers can be the kiss of death of a couple. The voting public like the big moves, the lifts, the kicks, the fast beats in routines.Just like Idol punters will dial in when the big notes are sung. They were not able to keep out of the bottom three.

Lacey and Cameron completed the show they were dancing a hip hop number. She is clearly very popular and pulling Cameron through with her, as he is just invisible. I suspect he will struggle as well once the partners are swapped.

The routine was ok, sexy school girl type number. However I kept on thinking of a dog on heat waiting to be sniffed every time she stuck her arse out.

The bottom three couples were Anya and Danny, Hok and Jaimie, and Neil and Lauren.

Anya was eliminated even though she fired up her solo routine this week, however Lauren was told she was on her last life line. Then sadly Hok was eliminated, but it is getting to the stage in the comp where the untrained dancers start to stumble. Lacey started wailing (they are dating) probably now thinking she will now have to share a hotel room with rather dull Lauren.

As you may or may not know, Matt Corby handclapper, has a girl he has an eye on however her father wont' let her date him until she finishes school this year.Matt Corby reveals in this weeks TV Weak, that he could see this girl as his wife.

The conventionality of these people depresses me, clearly no revolutionary here. Seventeen years of age and wanting to get married? And worse where is the rebelliousness of the teen years, if you want to date this chick do it behind daddy's back. Oh and message to the girl you should snatch Matt up as there is always a Veronica waiting in the wings.

Wade Robson may be a guest on Australia's So You Think You Can Dance.

This week Channel 10, and TV Weak tantalised us in an interview withe the wonderful talented Wade Robson that he may come out to Australia for So You Think You Can Dance, which auditions have commenced in Adelaide. Also in this a further interview he reveals some interesting facets of his life.

I had not realised he had be embroiled in the Michael Jackson saga, apparently he has had the bad luck to share his bed. Notwithstanding that in the kiddie fiddling Jackson saga he was called upon as a witness, and said nothing untoward happen. Apparently he is still friend with him. Lets hope he is not suffering Stockholm Syndrome.

Anyway he is an amazing talent, choreographingBrittany Spears concerts and video clips at 16??? I could barely put a burger together in Macca's at that age.A further cap to his career was an Emmy which he recently won for a routine on Season 2 of So You Think You Can Dance.Further info on win

It is Official Jacob Really is a Knob

It was revealed yesterday that Jacob Butler pulled the plug on some of his media duties on Tuesday. Speculation on whether it was hangover or nervous breakdown continue. It also revealed he had an album in the can to be soon released. Somehow I don't see it winning any Aria awards. I suspect we will soon see him on Big Brother, or putting on 100kg to qualify for Australia's Biggest Loser. Don't worry Jacob no need to win the latter show as you already are.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Calling Hillsong can you come and interfere with the votes on Dancing With The Stars? Clearly it is ok for Sunrise to use their flock to keep the hopelessly untalented Mark Beretta on the show.

Again a very slow start to the show it really is not necessary to line up all the dancers and make rehearsed banal conversation. However it did make me realise that Ossie Ostrich really had been carrying Darryl for all those years.

The delightful Sonia Kruger added some frission with an interesting camera angle to her opening entrance down their stairs. Just as we were about to see whether she was going commando tonight she lost her shoe and the camera angle changed. Damn.

Corrine & Csaba were first up with the Salsa. Even prior to her being voted off tonight I thought this show is not going to help her career.

There are three reasons to go on this show:1. To boost your profile and promote your self for further job opportunities;2. To show a different aspect to your personality;3. Or you are a Channel 7 'celebrity' and therefore have no choice.

I can only guess it was number 1. Her occupation says comedian, but I really saw no sign of it in 3 episodes. She had no natural voter base, as her last gig was The Glasshouse on the ABC, and we all know those viewers have panic attacks if they see a commercial. I know there was an outcry when they axed the show, but maybe the ABC exec was right as she certainly does not make me laugh.

The unfortunate thing with their elimination is that we won't get to see the lovely Csaba the hottest dancer on the show.

Bridie Carter and Craig did the Foxtrot. Even thinking about her makes me yawn. Bland, boring and beige. She seriously needs to find a personality and fast, maybe she was the reason I never watched McCleods Daughters. I will have to put up with her for awhile as she always scores highly on the dancing.

Just as I was about to slip into a coma Anh Do and Luda came on to dance the salsa. Now Corinne this is comedian, he used that camera to make us laugh enough to vote for him, and when the dance begins the showmanship continues. He gets my vote tonight. This show is going to sky rocket his profile. Memo to David Leckie let Anh Do compere next seasons and send Darryl to the place where all the old unfunny comedians go. I am sure he and Don Lane could have cuppa together there.

Elka Graham and Michael were dancing in a pre-record as Michael had some unmentioned family emergency. She revealed they had a facebook site but did not mention how many friends they had. Clearly not enough with her second week in the bottom two. She is gorgeous to look at, however Australia is not as enthralled with swimmers as we are led to believe. Prediction - She will be doing her last dance next week. She gets my vote for telling Darryl what a short arse he is.

Mark Beretta & Linda danced a very unco salsa. Couple of things:Men over 40 should not wax their chests, it is just disturbing.Did we really need the 5 minute advertorial for Myers, which was disguised as a chat back stage.Everytime I see Mark it just gives me flashbacks to The Master episodes, the show he compered which was axed after one episode. His charisma has not increased since then. Todd had taken the serum of truth when he said the routine was hideous. Maybe Todd wants him off the show as he wants to be the only ageing queen in the limelight.

The Sunrise Family is influencing the vote, as he was safe tonight with a score of a very low 18, but that is a story we won't see on Today Tonight.

Jessica Rowe and Serghei did a respectable foxtrot. She actually looked great this week but maybe because all her flesh was covered. Dressed as a feline she even looked sultry at times. Her husband Peter Overton was not allowed to attend. Come on Channel 9 do you really think me seeing him in the audience is going to make me watch or not watch 60 minutes. Now I can understand why Channel 7 won't let Bert Newton attend as he will upstage Darryl.

Patti Newton & Sandro danced the salsa. Again she was great and I thought it was fabulous that she took the opportunity to have a good grope of Sandro's hot body. It must have been a refreshing change from the blubbery Bert. She can dance, and will be difficult to beat this series. I thought she was going to have a Tara Reid boob moment with the way her dress was moving. With her 40 years in show biz experience worse has probably happened to her.

David Hobson and Karina did the fox trot, it was entertaining and co-ordinated. However I thought David was trying to be too funny tonight I really like him when he is just himself.

James Courtney and Olya danced the Salsa. It was not the worst routine of the night. The poor things only had 4 hours of rehearsal time due to his racing commitments. Olya was clearly struggling as well, she looked panic stricken during the lifts. However clearly he is gaining a fan base, as he was safe for another week.

Bridie, Jessica, and Patti scored the highest with 30 and last was Mark Beretta with 18.

The show is looking tired from to many seasons in so few years. I doubt Channel 7 will change the formula as it is still rating very ighly. Some heavy duty editing would assist in making the show a bit snappier. Oh and a new compere would help.

Monday, October 8, 2007

Does Hillsong influence the results of Australian Idol shows, or does the voting public think Beatles songs are naff? Please discuss.

On tonight's show either of those theories could be correct. The bottom two Jacob Butler, and Carl Risley are not members of an evangelical christian organisation, but before we whip ourselves up into a christian conspiracy frenzy again (lets leave that to Today Tonight) they both managed to butcher overdone Beatles classics.

Personally I love a good conspiracy theory, however I am inclined to believe it is the latter. Does anyone under 40 really get excited by The Beatles these days, unless it involves a nasty divorce settlement and a prosthetic limb?

Also I know music purists are going to disagree, but was singing a Beatles tune really in the spirit of Brit Pop night as Dicko conceived it? It appears the voting public has punished them for it.

Even though Reality Raver confidently predicted Marty to go - the mystery of who is voting for him continues - must be either the Central Coast residents or the stoner dudes (if that is the case then Australia has a massive drug problem), it was no shock to see Jacob go.

It was meant to be his night, his genre, and he blew it. It was the equivalent of Mark Da Costa singing a Status Quo song on rock night. Lame.

He also blew the sympathy shag his Channel 10 girlfriend they were flashing on screen every 2 seconds was going to give him by thanking everyone but her. Particulary galling considering she probably spent about $1000 voting to keep Jacob in the competition.

The judges were encouraging and told him to keep on trying, but you could tell they thought it would be very doubtful he would be offered a record contract, You knew you were seeing a dream collapse and that teaching degree (music) was just one step closer.

The good news is that next Sunday there will be no Beatles songs as Idols will be singing songs from the year they were born. Disturbingly this will mean a couple of songs from the '90's.

Natalie was spotted doing the rehearsing for her new gig by doing the warm up for the Australian Idol acoustic night.

The judges are going to be Bonnie Lythgoe, Nigel Lythogoe's ex-wife - was this part of the divorce settlement? Does this mean Nigel will now not be a guest judge on the series. Bonnie has previously been a judge on the first season of So You Think You Can Dance. However has not appeared since, maybe that was when the marriage started breaking down.

They seperated earlier this year after being together for over two decades, and Nigel Lythgoe is currently dating plastic surgery addict Priscilla Presley. Credit must be given for him dating someone of his generation rather then a 20 something blonde as some men do once they split with their first wives.

Sunday, October 7, 2007

On a stronger episode of Australian Idol tonight again the issue was raised regarding who dresses the judges???

Mark Holden look like he was about to attend a Star Trek convention. Marcia was dressed as Caspar the Ghost, is Halloween coming up? And I cannot even speak about Dicko's shirt.

Kyle, who in the past I have found odious, was most suitably dressed, and again came up with the best witty oneliners of the night.

Tonight I thought the Idol's sorted themselves into the A and B list. Matt, Ben, and Tarasai basically said we are going to be top three, and the rest were just trying not to come last.

First up was Carl Risely with a Beatles number Can't Buy Me Love. Now I know theoretically the Beatles are Brit Pop, however I did not think that was getting into the spirit of the evening. Couldn't he have waited until '60's night to sing this?

Again it was the predictable swing number which Dicko called 'snuff jazz', but the other judges liked it. Carl certainly does not have the legs to go all the way in the comp, but he will certainly be around for a few more weeks.

Also I must confess he has me on a slow burn, early in the season I could not stand him, last week I was thinking he was kind of cute, and tonight I was having lascivious thoughts wondering what he would look like in his navy uniform. Then again perhaps he is the only male in in the show who is not a handclapping christian. Jacob does not count- as it would just become really boring having to constantly deal with his self-esteem issues.

Tarasai sang the Queen song, Somebody to Love.

Yes she did an amazing job, the high notes at the end were worth the touchdown she was given. However again she annoyed me with her comment at the beginning saying "This is a little story about myself" I am thought you did not write these lyrics, the fabulous Freddie Mercury did so please don't claim it as your own. This was almost on par as Daniel Mifsud as I previously posted claiming the Kiss arrangement as his own

Previous criticisms of her have been she has not connected with the songs by the judges. She did a bit of overkill to any one that would listen "that song touched me", and "I just so emotionally connected with that song" to make sure everyone knew she was feeling it. Again I thought a touch fake. However I do think it is the first genuinely deserved touchdown, and did mark her as a contender.

Marcia finally did the "hey girlfriend" thing for the first time this season, which has shown some restraint from her, as it has been a regular thing when addressing the darker skincontestants in previous seasons.

Ben Mckenzie was next with Oasis - Wonderwall. I just love this kid even though he is a member of some strange christian sect. I agreed with Marcia for once when she was gibbering about the light and shade in his voice. But please do they have to incessantly go on about his sexuality, I mean really Andrew G was the 12 inch joke really necessary?

Marty basically conceded defeat with a Kook song called naive. It was boring from start to finish. Dicko basically said to him it was time to go. I still don't get why people think he is so talented.

Then Marty pulls out the tired old excuse, of not used to playing covers or singing without his guitar. Ten points to Andrew G for asking "Why are you here then?"

Jacob sang the Beatles "Let It Be" after we were introduced to his girlfriend, Channel 10 publicist which they decided not to mention, just in case the viewers thought he was getting an unfair advantage. Personally I think he needs all the help he can get.

Dicko verbalised my thoughts - why did he pick a Beatles song, when for the past 4 weeks he has been channelling '90's brit pop bands. This was his opportunity to really put his mark on the competition, but he turned it into a 2cH moment.

Daniel Mifsud sang "Message In a Bottle" by The Police. Last week I just started to like him, but after tonight performance I am back to my original opinion that he is bland. Kyle is right - he ticks all the boxes but there is something he does not like. I think maybe there is a bit of arrogance there. He thought once he had deigned to audition for Idol that it was all going to be plain sailing to the Opera House. Maybe he is just not as talented as he thinks he is.

His good friend Jade McCrae could teach him some dance moves, this would also be a good chance for her to publicise her new album again through a show she disparages.

Natalie Gauci sang Amy Winehouse - Rehab. She finally got the look right tonight she looked hot, and apparently the no wheat diet is working. Might give it a go myself.

However turned a sultry rebellious song into a cutsie Lesley Gore "It's My Party and I'll Cry If I Want To" type song, or as Mark Holden said Disneyfied it. It needed attitude. Amy Winehouse would have leapt from the audience onto the stage with a blood filled hypodermic screaming in disgust if she had to listen to that cover of her hit song.

Matt Corby sang Bittersweet Symphony by Verve. Which is brave choice as it is an iconic song for a lot of people. He did a good job, but again did it deserve a touchdown? He did not evoke the emotion in me as the original does, but the audience went into a frenzy.

I revised my position from last week saying that he would have to be caught with a kilo of smack to lose the competition. I think he would have be caught with a kilo of smack whilst poisoning Sydney's water supply to lose.

Speaking of losing - where has John "Kermie" Foreman been this season. He has a much lower profile this year, and you barely sight him on camera. The guitarist on steroids gets more screen time. I wonder if this is his request or it is the egos of the judges who did this. If some idiots can start a I want to shag Dicko Facebook page, I think I will start a Bring Back Kermie Facebook site.