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In my adult age, I have come to realize that all the things I said never to in my childhood days replayed back in my adult age. All came in form of events, scenarios, circumstances, experiences and for sure it changed the way I perceived life.

Some events or occurrences in our lives have being pre-determined and pre destined to occur while some are not. Some are as a result of that human nature that come from us by upholding with a strong will to a particular event, crisis, or scenarios in our life in form of “never attitude and approach”.

For instance, “I will never drink alcohol” or say “I will never marry an Anglican” all these are normal and daily events which I have heard people speak about all the time with that upholding spirit not to be part of drinking alcohol or marrying an Anglican.

However my point is, because we as human beings, we are not perfect and nature has a stronger grip on us than ourselves. We try to uphold to our wishes but nature and imperfection of man forces us down. Most of the people that can’t get their eyes off a bottle of whisky once said “never” to alcohol. And most of the people that said “never” to Anglican marriage ended up taking their vows and walking down the aisle in the Anglican set up.

Although circumstances sometimes forces our hand to that which we have said “never” to and all is due to our imperfection as humans. So in such instances who do you blame, yourself or nature? Lol

While most of us are carried away with the concept of buying one wrist watch and getting the other gold bracelet for free, we seem to have forgotten that nothing is ever free. If there was a way the air we breathe in could be measured and sold in stores with barcodes on it, it would have happened a long time ago. Lol

Someone asked me one day “why is it that water is not free, it’s natural just like air” I looked at her and laughed. I politely told her “such is life, that’s how we see it and that’s how we take it”

So don’t imagine or think you are getting that gold bracelet for free just for buying a wrist watch. In one way or the other, you are indirectly or have directly paid for that “free bracelet” (trade secrets) Lol.

Such is life in everything that we do. I always say to my friends, work hard and don’t ever expect things to be done for you when you are more than capable of helping yourself. Learn to do things for yourself that is the only way you can self-develop. And by self-development, you are sharpening your intellectual capabilities, anything good you learn today stays with you forever no one can take it away from you. One skill opens you to another and another and another and you will begin to discover a lot of things you didn’t know you could do.

It will no longer be a case of buy one get one free in your life but rather it will become a case of learn or develop one skill set and get the best abilities, jobs, recommendations, reviews, success all and many more for free.

Each time I read about or hear televised violence, what comes into play and practice are usually kids and the effect it has on kids. But with the fast changing society we are in, the reality of the issue of televised violence should be focused and channeled to adults too, because adults have become the core victims and perpetrators of televised violence.

The realistic effect is that when adults have seen a violent scene over the media, you would expect adults to assimilate it and get over it as adults. No!!! Rather they begin to replay these scenes in their minds and become saddled with the responsibility of trying it out even when they know the outcome and implication of their thoughts and actions. Then they begin to look for a victim to carry out their wicked intentions (opportunistic crime).

Most of the news on media regarding murder, rape, and all sort of evils are been carried out by adults and kids to whoever their chosen victims are.

The reality for kids engaged in televised violence, is more of the day dreaming effect for them. After they have seen the televised violence, they begin to imagine themselves as James Bond in “die another day” Or Arnold Schwarzenegger in “terminator”. They begin to reminisce over the act, and they start to use their toys to act out as weapons. Now the effect of that day dreaming becomes reality when they hit a fellow student in school in an act to be James Bond. There is a bridge, a thin line between what we know and what we think we know regarding the effects of media violence.

Action movies or any image containing violence has been set aside for entertainment purposes that is why hollywood pictures and warner bros and other entertainment movie productions companies are still in business. The mindset when watching these movies or events is of paramount importance. I once wrote an unpublished article on the effect of televised violence on kids back in my university days. I do not want to lay emphasis on just kids, adults and kids are both victims and perpetrators of televised violence.

These days, even the so called animation programs for kids, you will be amazed on the kind of inappropriate words and images you will find in them. So what is the way forward?

There have been a lot of controversial understanding regarding the use and management of wealth. For me, money/wealth is meaningless when there is no direct or indirect plan on how to manage or use it. One of the core killers of wealth is impulse buying. How about impulse buying a 2.5 billion mansion just because you love the yard or bath tub! Goodness!

Why don’t you remake your own yard to suite your taste or better still change the bath tub in your compact house. You don’t need to buy the entire mansion when you can remake your yard or change to a new bathtub. I have heard people say they loved a certain wrist watch because of the big round face. There are thousands of wrist watches with a big round face, why do you need to add a $20,000 dollar wrist watch to your already existing 30 wrist watch collections. All wrist watches tell the same purpose which is time, none will tell you a different time than what it is at the moment except you tuned it that way yourself. So why have 30 when you can have just 1. That is because there are no set plans for your finances, and most of it go on impulse buying.

However, impulse buying ruins finances. For some people, it is a habit even when they are out of cash, they got to borrow to satisfy that desire. It is nice to have couple of cash in your wallet and a huge amount stacked up in the bank. Now the question is for what purpose? To impulse buy? To intimidate? Or to help the bank remain in business? Money/wealth got to be used properly, there got to be a plan, a purpose for it. Purposes like saving for a rainy day, building up kids’ education fund or saving for a world trip all are purposes and plans that can be achieved.

It is not how much that matters, what matters is how quick you destroy them. Some are principled when it comes to spending habits while some are not. Why do people file for bankruptcy? Is not because they do not have a dime anymore, they still have wealth except that this time it has been misplaced, mismanaged, and unaccounted for. So when they look back, there is nothing left to ponder on. All the money, the lottery win, all gone!! They are actually broke for real!

There is a saying that goes “you never know the value of money if you have never worked” it is easy to spend money given to you by someone else, but the moment you begin to make money in a genuinely money making way, then you will begin to understand the principles of money management, that burden begins to weigh on your shoulders. It is hard to make but easy to spend. Huh lol

Wealth is when you have more than enough money you need to live normal basic life, when that happens, certain things should be put in place like;

Start by clearing all your debts- All the debts you accumulated before you became rich.

Think of ways to help or reach out to those you had always wished you could help or better their lives if you had enough resources. Now you have it, do it and put a smile on someone’s face.

Start thinking of an investment plan; do not stack it all up in the bank and wait for it to yield interest, whether your money is there or not, the bank will still be in business so think of ways of helping yourself first before the bank. Worst case scenarios for banks in the absence of funds will consolidate with other stronger banks and guess what? They may be consolidating with your money. So why not invest your wealth into something you will enjoy associating yourself with. Something you can commit time and energy to see it grow and possibly make you richer.

Not for profit organisation is a good way to spend your money .For example you set you a foundation that takes care of pregnant women that are sick. At least you are putting a smile on the faces of people. The world would be a better place with such diversion of wealth to the service of humanity.

Sometimes what matters most in communication is the flow and the clear message that is being passed unto. Some questions require a yes or no answer to it, while some have to do with a little bit of sentence to make it meaningful and digestible. I find communication quite strange and annoying sometimes when you are sure expecting something you end up getting another leaving you more confused than ever.

I once got lost in an airport, I had no other option but to ask a station attendant to help me out in retracing my steps. I usually do not like asking, I do enjoy venturing into the act of self discovery because that is the only and fastest way to learn. But knowing that I had a flight to catch and I was almost certain that I won’t catch the flight if I didn’t ask someone for help.

So I spotted this beautiful lady in a corner and I walked up to her saying ‘Please, can you direct me to gate D1? ‘ she looked at me and replied ‘ Okay sure, If you take the north east entrance of the south west door, take the east elevator and turn right to the waiting area, your gate is at the north west side of the waiting area’ . At that moment I knew I was in deep shit, knowing that I was not good at geography, I got even more confused and disappointed. I thanked the lady and left.

I walked a few meters, I saw a man whom I asked the same question , he politely told me to go down the escalator, take my first right and my second left and that was it!!! There was no need to east west and north south!! pheeewww!!

I asked a friend sometime ago, ‘ Are you hungry? I expected such question should come with a yes or no answer right? but no, because she replied’ somehow, not sure, just a little bit, not really’. Okay so what am I suppose to do with all these phrases!! ‘ I thought, ‘ you are either hungry yes, or not hungry which is a no. And by the time I was done with the cooking, she ate it all up and asked for more. So what happened to “somehow, not sure, or a little bit”. A yes or no would have made a difference!!

Each time I visit other embassies, they are usually free of crowded entrance and people loitering around waiting to be attended to, no queue or hassle. But the moment there is need for me to go to the Nigerian embassy for something or some documentation, I realize how stressful that is on me.Do you know that every Nigerian living in Canada has to travel to Ottawa to get a new passport or any form of travel documentation? With the inflow of Nigerians into Canada, I think it is high time the government looked into establishing several consulate offices in strategic provinces and cities in Canada that have a high population of Nigerians so that Nigerians won’t have to travel all the way to Ottawa to get a passport!!

Not only do you have to pay the flight fare to get there which is not cheap, you have to pay for a hotel and food, and transportation and also pay for the application and its processing fees!!! . I happen to be in the area at the time of this photo so I took a snap shot of this! People queuing and loitering at the entrance door of the consulate office in Ottawa in need of a new passport ! Nigerian embassy is the only embassy in Canada that I know that has no need for an appointment to be seen by a case worker. Everyone is seen on a first come first serve basis and as a walk ins!! So imagine how it will be when hundreds of people travelling from all corners and areas of Canada decide to show up one morning just as in the picture below.

I believe we can save ourselves the embarrassment by having more consulate offices to meet our needs and to have appointments times and schedule put in place in order to meet the needs of citizens!! Phewwww!!!

At least one consulate in Alberta, One consulate in Manitoba, One in British Columbia!! There is one in Ontario already (Ottawa) and many more !!

The holiday season is around the corner once again. What better time to discover the diversity of nature, enjoy the marvels of technology and embrace the passion of humanity? Busyhandz ignites this adventure by providing you some top holiday destinations around the world. Whether you are an outdoor addict, in search of nightlife dynamics, a passionate lover of nature and wildlife or just interested in shopping… join us in this exciting journey of discovery! This is a series giving you a glimpse of our top 5 destinations in each continents of the world… starting from the untapped beauty called Africa!

Nigeria : Calabar

Nigeria (with Abuja as capital city) is a beautiful country in West Africa and has a population of about 150 million people. Nigerians are among the warmest individuals you will meet on planet earth. With the inauguration of a new government (headed by President Muhammadu Buhari) and the near-complete annihilation of her security challenges in the North-Eastern Nigeria, focus shifts back to her abundant tourist attractions. Having witnessed her most stable transition of government and the commendations from world leaders, there is no better time to plan for a holiday in Nigeria and our top destination is Calabar…. The capital city of Cross River (a coastal state in southern Nigeria). Calabar has a rich history that will fill your holiday with both fun and knowledge. With average temperature of about 26 degree C, Calabar presents a beautiful recovery from the freezing winter season in Europe and North America. Ok… time to capture the sights and sounds that make Calabar our top destination in Nigeria.

Obudu Mountain Resort (previously known as Obudu Cattle Ranch)

The magnificent Obudu Mountain Resort offers a full range that makes a holiday truly re-energizing! Discovered in early 1950s, it has a serene expanse which can be enjoyed from cable ride facilities with an astonishing vistas. You can also drive up the mountain range or walk your way up (for the brave). Guides are available (for a fee) to take you around on hiking expedition. There are exquisite facilities including hotel rooms (singles, couples and families) once you get to the top of the mountains (about 5200 ft. above sea level). These and many other will make you extend your holidays… Don’t forget to check out the classy water park at the base of the mountain that should embolden your family holiday. Local and continental delicacies are available to recharge after exploring the marvels of nature. The charming poise of staff at Obudu is also a beauty to behold. One thing to keep in mind is that weather can change abruptly from a plush sunshine to intense rain… should not surprise anyone from East Coast United States and Canada. Obudu has become a truly global tourist and holiday destination. If you are thinking of an escape with your loved one (s) for an intimate bonding with freedom and nature, Obudu might just be what you’re looking for. The best times to visit Obudu (weather-wise) is between October and February!

The Agbokim waterfalls cascades over a cliff and creates a breathtaking seven-part waterfalls. Besides the waterfalls itself, the background natural environment provides splendid sights for bird watchers. A combination of the clattering sounds of nature and pristine atmosphere should trill those seeking a working holiday destination.

Of course you should not depart Calabar without visiting the Cross-River national park. A beautiful conservation that covers an area of about 640 sq. km and is a beautiful home to a range of animals including gorillas, butterflies, birds, fishes and many reptiles. It has lodging facilities to accommodate visitors. The main fun activity is taking walks into the rainforest…

For those who love shopping (perhaps the majority of us), Tinapa Resort offers an excellent combination of shopping and leisure to cater for both singles and families. There is a plethora of world-class hotels available here. Some of the things to check out are the Tinapa Shopping Centre, Tinapa Water Park, Tinapa Movie Studio, many beautiful restaurants catering for variety of tastes.

There are a number of classy night clubs (Jasper 131, Mayfair Lounge, Pinnacle, and many others) to wind down and embrace the hospitality and romantic appeal of Calabar. Some of the top hotels within Calabar include Channel View, Metropolitan Hotel, Tinapa Lakeside Hotel, Transcorp Hotels, Axari Hotels, Lush Hotels… depending on your budget.

Hobbies in life are designed to keep us in the spotlight! They create fun, and give us satisfaction. Our expectations in life are met in those activities which refresh and give us a sense of accomplishment.

However, there is a meeting point between that which we like and enjoy doing and that which drives our creative minds. Our hobbies are who we are, when the willingness to turn our hobbies into a creative power comes, creativity begins to give birth to ideas which will help us to succeed. Enjoying something which we do for leisure or pleasure such as dancing, playing soccer, singing, watching movies and all kinds of hobbies, all these should help us achieve or maybe discover our inner self and abilities.

Why can’t we turn our hobbies into creativity? Someone that loves watching movies will somehow know and get used to the sequence of events as the movies clips roll by. Over time, the person will begin to have story ideas on how to make that movie better or how to make the movie longer or more interesting or even change the genre. If a person decides to work on these, he may have a brand new script in his/her hands. An original version of a new movie.

There is a saying that goes like this, “you are what you eat” the same is applicable to hobbies. When we take advantage of our hobbies, they might on the long run lead to financial freedom and a feeling of satisfaction. There will be a prevailing self-determination and effortless push to be successful in that new found “power” of hobby or maybe “career”.

When hobby becomes career through creative and imaginative outburst, it naturally leads to a journey of self-discovery where skills are nurtured and developed over time to accommodate the new changes.

There are certain skills needed to nurture a creative work or to progress in a career. These skills come in as you explore deep into the creative thinking and become comfortable with your thoughts, inner self, and begin to familiarise yourself with the new you. Because creativity gives birth to new ideas and skills to grow and nurture that hobby which has become a part of you and the creativity part is you because creativity comes from the inner self.

I encourage you to embark on a journey of self-discovery where your hobby seamlessly merges with creativity. If this inspires you to success, I will be happy to share your story!