The Mustache Abides

Wolves have packs and bees have hives
Soldiers have platoons, Indians tribes
Football players on the gridiron have teams
Everyone’s part of a group it seems
Teamwork is good, don’t get me wrong
Takes a passel o’ notes to make a song
And a lot o’ hands you’ll need for your roundup
But plenty o’ folks let their souls get ground up
Needin’ acceptance from others is human nature
Exchangin’ loyalty can enhance your stature
Just remember though when your work here is done
When you stand before God, you’ll stand alone.

They call this part of summer “dog days”I wouldn’t treat a dog this wayIt gets hot, muggy and miserablePeople get angry and irritableTraffic is noisy, loud and slowLike Christmas shoppin’ season, but more soNo one wants to get anythin’ doneAt least I don’t, a majority of oneStorm clouds rise high in the skyThen say, “hell with it”, give up and dieDogs are smart though, they’ve got it madeSprawled out, pantin’, in the shade

Summertime in Georgia at Mustache World HeadquartersIs high time for mowin’‘Cause the grass sure likes growin’The field ain’t level nor flat and it’s peppered with holesAnd there’s always a threatOf thunder and wetTall trees tower over the edges of the open spaceSo when morning or evening shadows fallIt can seem like I’m hitting a wallYou’d think with so much rain I’d never have to worry about dustBut with every turn it’ll riseCovering my hat, whiskers and eyes

Well, so between all the dust and the shadows and sun I woveUp and down and across the field I droveTurning a wild weed pasture into something closer to a golf course fairwayI’d turn my head when I had to go through the red clay haboobAnd slow down a touch when over toward the trees I movedThere’s no regular grid on this patch, I go here, there and thataway

If you’ve never mowed grassHere in Georgia, take a passIf you’re squeamish about wildlife surprisesYou need to let your senses do‘Cause there’s a lot to pay attention toBut none are as important as your eyes isMore than once these last few yearsI’ve often had to swerve and veerAs summer’s cycle goes through its flow and ebbBut when you’re shade and dust cloud blindIt’s hard not to accidentally findYour face plastered with a giant spider web

It could have been a mighty crashI could only use one hand to thrashAnd fend off the critter with my spittin’, slappin’ and blowin’It just goes to prove with real aplombHow true is that ol’ rule of thumbKeep your mind on what you’re doin’, and look where you’re goin’

Some parts of this narrative may be fiction. Sort of.Memo to Self: Next time work out a rhyming scheme before you start writing the poem.

Unlike Jethro Gibbs, I do believe in coincidence. I also believe that not everything that looks like a coincidence is a coincidence. I suppose I adhere more closely to the Goldfinger Rule of Thumb.

Still, if the little hairs on the back of your neck are standing up, it’s prudent to be (at least mentally) prepared for the next step in the Goldfinger progression. Which kinda resembles Gibbs’ Rule #36.

I think it’s a known fact that I watch RFD-TV. My first exposure to that channel’s programming was some years back, before RFD was available on our local cable system, when its parent corporation put the channel’s programming temporarily on FamilyNet.

Tomorrow, as I just discovered from belatedly watching last Wednesday’s “Western Sports Weekly“, FamilyNet becomes the Cowboy Channel, dropping (most of) its heretofore predominantly nostalgic TV programming for rodeo and rodeo-oriented fare. RFD-TV has been sponsoring an annual rodeo called The American, the success of which has convinced the corporation there is sufficient demand for Western sports above and beyond what RFD, with its agribusiness and agrarian lifestyle focus, could offer.

I’ll watch, to see how well they pull it off. The first few days of primetime programming certainly brings plenty of rodeo events.

Yes, it was campy, but I was in kindergarten. So to me, then and for many years after, Adam West was Batman.

I hadn’t yet discovered comic books, and the Dark Knight was still years away. The show could be called a takeoff on the Silver Age Batman, whose adventures took place within the bounds of the Comics Code Authority and came to be regarded in later years as fluffy and silly. Really though, there wasn’t all that much room for parody.

I just happened to be at the right age, completely innocent of The Batman’s origin story, to be enthralled by the show. It was only later, I think after the show’s original run, that I learned why Bruce Wayne had put on the costume. By then I had bought in to the characters so much that giving me a book containing some of the old comic-book adventures was a pretty good way to ensure that I stayed out from under foot for an afternoon.

Though I was momentarily confused that Commissioner Gordon in the comics looked more like Alan Napier than Neil Hamilton. And I wondered where Chief O’Hara and Aunt Harriet were. That was my first exposure to the differences in how characters were realized in different media, or even in different outings in the same media — after all, the origin story was definitely pre-Silver Age.

Still, in my head I still always heard Adam West’s voice when comic-book Batman spoke. As for later TV incarnations, Olan Soule? Who was he?

It wasn’t until after the Tim Burton series of movies that TV successfully replaced Adam West as the quintessential voice of Batman in my memory, when Kevin Conroy took on the role. Having the chance to play off the best Joker voice ever, whoever that guy was who had the same name as Luke Skywalker but couldn’t possibly be him, didn’t hurt.

Still, Adam West kept going, eventually voicing a Batman-like TV superhero on an episode of “Kim Possible,” in between his duties of voicing Quahog’s mayor on “Family Guy” (a guy who, according to West, was named Adam West and looked and sounded just like the actor of the same name, but wasn’t actually him).

Actors whose later opportunities end up limited because of one definitive role often complain, for a while, about the burden — but even Leonard Nimoy eventually admitted that, yes, he was Spock. If Adam West ever complained he was low-key about it, and like so many others he found a way to turn the limitation into a spotlight of his own that no one, not even Kevin Conroy, could steal.

The actors playing the arch-villains on “Batman” may have been more famous when the show was on, but Adam West was the star.

The other day, a re-airing of 2017’s RodeoHouston Super Shootout appeared on one of the FoxSports channels. To my surprise they skipped the preliminary barrel racing round, in which last year’s NFR champion — who was 68 last December — failed to make the final four. World champion bull rider Sage Kimzey, who placed second in the prelims, chose a daunting bull for his final-four ride, but the perfectly understandable go-big-or-go-home move — why draw an easy bull that can’t give you a winning ride? — cost him a premature dismount.

One of the bareback bronc riders had an early dismount from a horse that seemed to have been taking lessons from the bulls; normally horses don’t spin in place like bulls do.

Recently it occurred to me I had acquired two coffee mugs depicting rodeo events. From the University of Wyoming I’d ordered a mug with the state’s bucking horse icon (seen at the second link above), which represents saddle-bronc riding. I also have a mug with the words “Cowboy Up!” where the cowboy on a bucking bronc is leaning sharply backwards as bareback bronc riders do, and isn’t holding a rope as saddle bronc riders do.

I’ve since added two more mugs, depicting bull riding and steer wrestling. I think team roping will be next.