Baby Ten goes for a walk so you can meet him

Judging by how close-up the shots are, it’s a set-up. (Lainey: it is indeed. These are FilmMagic photos -- and they don’t “pap”. They’re being sold via Getty Images as “exclusive coverage”. There’s nothing accidental about them. They’re not cheap either. So I decided not to spend the money. Especially not on a baby. Click here to see.) Reese looks pinched, but I chalk that up to her being a tight-ass. Newborn Tennessee is as cute as a baby can be at the age, and the magazines rewarded Witherspoon with flattering if bland descriptions of the photos.

US Weekly says he’s “blonde” (I would have gone with bald).
Reese is described as “casual” and “thin,” the way a new mother is “expected” to be, obviously. And she’s not too dressed up (that would be vain), but not so sloppy that she’s let herself go. We judgy bitches should be satisfied, shouldn’t we?

But there’s a touch of malaise in all this: PEOPLE only had about 120 words on these photos. Considering how they salivate over any celebrity pregnancy or baby photo, it’s downright stingy.

It all feels very obligatory, doesn’t it? It’s as if Reese is saying, fine, I know I am one of the architects of this mommy game (think back to her Oscar campaign-- she was not only the down-home wife and mother, her marriage was painted over perfect, remember?) -- so let’s get this over with. It’s like a dreaded family visit with your crotchety great aunt– you know she has to see the baby, but you schedule it for a half hour before baby’s bedtime so you can get it over with quickly. Reese thinks it’s beneath her but the reality is, well, she has to now.

Look at these shots, how she lifts the baby out of the stroller– the message is that this is a mom who actually changes diapers. And… sings duets with Michael Buble…

That’s her career now. That’s definitely the target market now then. That’s the demo that needed to see these photos.