Making Fast Friends

Last Tuesday, the New Jersey Young Professionals organization held
a "Girl's Night Out" event at the Senoritas Mexican Restaurant in
Bloomfield.

If you like the idea of meeting a multitude of people in a matter
of minutes, but speed dating seems a bit out of your element, then
perhaps you ought to give speed friending a try. On Tuesday,
June 7, single and married New Jersey women gathered at Señoritas
Mexican Grill in Bloomfield for a quick bite, a beverage, and a few
new bonds.

New Jersey Young Professionals (NJYP), the sponsor of the event, is
a social networking organization that caters strictly to
professionals who are 21-39 years old. The group’s slogan,
“Get out. Make friends,” is simply what it’s all about. NJYP
hosts between 20-30 events a month, at anywhere from coffee houses,
to comedy clubs, to the great outdoors.

While speed friending might seem like a new concept to some, NJYP
has already organized a whopping 53 of the events since Laura
Occhipinti, the network’s owner, started hosting them in June
2006.

“We would do speed dating events and it made me think how great it
would be to apply the same concept to help people make friends,”
Occhipinti said. “Sure, people can make friends at one of our
Happy Hours, but you can't really meet and exchange info with 10 to
20 people unless it is structured. It's not for everyone, but
those who attend tend to love it.”

Anne Marie Saada, a senior software engineer, admitted to feeling
hesitant to take part in the event initially, but in the end, she
was happy she did.

Saada said, “I wanted to meet more people in the area. I was
very nervous coming into it, but it went a lot better than I
expected.”

At every NJYP speed friending event, two-seater tables are arranged
in a circle: sitters on the outside, movers on the inside. At
the end of each four-minute period, a bell rings and the movers
shift to their next potential pal. Prior to the first
rotation, all speed frienders are given a sheet with the first and
last names, e-mail addresses, hometowns, hobbies, and job titles of
the women they will be meeting.

Occhipinti believes that sharing contact information is key to
getting the most out of your speed friending experience.

“I have seen that after these events, one of the women who
attended, (there is always a natural leader), would reach out to
all the other women via email and bring them together for
reunion-type events,” Occhipinti said. “This is how close
friendships are born. It’s about what happens after the speed
event. I just help by making all the introductions and
sharing all the information.”

Like Saada, many of the other attendees noted that they were
pleasantly surprised with just how much they enjoyed
themselves.

“I felt weird going on my own, but after being there, I realized
that it wasn’t bad at all,” Cathy Maslowski, a system engineer,
said. “I wanted to meet more women, considering there aren’t
many in my field. I would definitely like to attend another
event.”

Annie Tasker, a graduate student and Florida native, joined
NJYP after making the move to New Jersey to aid her in expanding
her social network.

“It’s a great group of people,” Tasker said. “I didn’t meet
anyone tonight that I didn’t like.”

But just what is it that makes these girls nights out so
successful? After close social examination, Occhipinti has
formulated her theory:

“It seems to me that women love meeting other women when no
men are around,” she said. “I have observed this at any
all-women events and even on the line for the women's room.
But during these random occasions I've never seen women take the
next step and exchange information so a real friendship could
form. I think speed friending takes away that awkwardness and
allows for women to become real friends, after the initial
meeting.”

If you are interested in attending a speed friending event or any
other NJYP affair, visit the calendar at njyp.org.