“Remember not the sins of my youth” -- These are words from a currently popular song, in turn taken from David’s words in Psa 25:7.

Now why should we or David either be worried about sins of long ago –long, long ago for some of us? We and he repented, we/he confessed, we/he prayed. We were forgiven—long ago.

But, I confess that the temptations that BESET me are those same sins that started in my youth. Perhaps in that time of hubris, Satan finds our weakest character trait and attacks and lodges arrows whose tips bedevil us with the pain of sin all our lives.

To illustrate: The popular kids in high school cussed and so did I. (Shame on me). I kept that world separate from home and Mom never knew—provable by the fact that the only scars on my hide are bullet holes and various self-inflicted accidental wounds. I got to college and waxed worse, still leading singing and making talks. Then I obtained a master’s degree in bad language in the USMC. I went to Florida College 3 years, preached full time for 10 and part time for years, and have been a deacon for decades. I cleaned it up. But when frustration builds up, I still fight the battle over, when multiple things go wrong in a short time and I am tired and, and, and….the words are at the tip of my tongue, in the edge of my mind. Shame on me.

I wish I could say that is the only sin that began in my youth, battles I still fight too often. I suspect David was warning young people—don’t start. It never stops. The appetites that you do not learn to control now will haunt you all your lives.

For that same reason, Paul warns a middle-aged Timothy, “Flee youthful lusts.”Old people are bothered by the same temptations that plague young ones. Problems may vary from vulgar language to pornography to covetous materialism to sexual fantasies to lying to envy, or a host of others, but the principle remains that it is easier to never begin than to stop, easier to stop when you are young than later. Now is the time.

So, with David and Paul, I would also warn: Learn now to control yourself. Every indulgence will weaken you and haunt you all your life. Not because it is unforgiven but because it never goes away. Like an addiction, sin/Satan never leaves you alone. You can control it, but you are never over it. So you too consider yourselves dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus.Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its desires,and do not present your members to sin as instruments to be used for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who are alive from the dead and your members to God as instruments to be used for righteousness.For sin will have no mastery over you, because you are not under law but under grace.(Rom 6:11-14, NET) Keith Ward

In our quest to diligently teach our children, I think we often overlook something.We care for our children, nurturing both body and soul.Our task, though, is to work our way out of the job.If my thirty year old child still cannot dress himself, or needs to be reminded to brush his teeth, I have failed miserably.In the same way, our children cannot make it to Heaven on our spiritual coattails.It is often difficult for a parent to realize that his child’s faith should be his own, not an exact replica of his.A child who does nothing but ape his father’s opinions has, like the Jews of Isaiah’s day, a faith which is a commandment of men learned by rote, Isa 29:13,rather than learned by personal study, meditation, and conviction.Both of my sons have slightly differing views from mine about some passages of scripture.I’m glad.It means they have taken root on their own and, though there is never any guarantee, I feel much more optimistic about their remaining faithful when I am gone.If you remember the story of the orange tree my mother-in-law gave us, which rooted itself while we were trying to find a place to put it, here is yet another application:children need to have a little freedom in their quest for spirituality, freedom to spread their own roots.Parents who demand exact conformity, treating any difference as a sign of disrespect, are spoon-feeding their children’s spirituality while at the same time stunting their growth.They might as well be carrying them off the ground in a black plastic nursery pot so their roots won’t branch out.Sooner or later they will become pot-bound and die.While you expect to shape their values and instill basic concepts of spirituality and faith, God expected that they would ask, “Why?” and that you would give them real and sensible answers.“Because I said so,” does have an appropriate time and place in teaching them authority, but not in teaching the word of God.If you cannot tell them why, then when you are gone why should they continue?Encourage them to study and develop on their own.Treat their discoveries as equally interesting as yours. You may think Paul wrote Hebrews and they may not.You may believe the three-person interpretation of the Song of Solomon and they may prefer the two-person.You may look at Romans 7 as any man without Christ, while they believe Paul is talking about himself before his conversion.Isn’t it great?You will most likely have an eternity to discuss these things together and with the authors themselves, while the parents who demanded absolute conformity and automaton feedback, may find themselves looking around, wondering where their children are.And the people came up out of the Jordan on the tenth day of the first month, and encamped in Gilgal, on the east border of Jericho.And those twelve stones, which they took out of the Jordan, did Joshua set up in Gilgal. And he spoke unto the children of Israel, saying, When your children shall ask their fathers in time to come, saying, What mean these stones?Then you shall let your children know, saying, Israel came over this Jordan on dry land.For Jehovah your God dried up the waters of the Jordan from before you, until you were passed over, as Jehovah your God did to the Red Sea, which he dried up from before us, until we were passed over;that all the peoples of the earth may know the hand of Jehovah, that it is mighty; that you may fear Jehovah your God for ever.Josh 4:19-24.Dene Ward

I recently came across an article titled “How to Avoid the Natural Reactions that Affect Good Decision Making.”It is too long to go over here, but it did make me realize that natural reactions can be controlled.How?The author, who was not interested in spiritual matters at all, listed several ways, but they all boiled down to this—control yourself and do not let those “natural” reactions rule you.The Sermon on the Mount is full of exactly those kinds of statements.Rejoice and be glad [when others revile you and persecute you] for so persecuted they the prophets before you.But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.And that’s only a few from Matthew 5.This is not easy, but I think the key is this:God doesn’t expect us to control our natural reactions—he expects us to change what comes naturally to us.And He expects us to do it during the most difficult times of our lives.His people have been doing it for thousands of years.Jesus went to Peter’s house one evening and found his mother-in-law lying sick with a fever.What did she do the moment she was healed?And he came and took her by the hand and lifted her up, and the fever left her, and she began to serve them, Mark 1:30.How many of us would have taken the next few days off to recuperate, expecting a little more sympathy too?The apostles were arrested and put in prison, then brought out and beaten.What did they do? Then they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the name, Acts 5:41.Rejoicing at being beaten?That certainly wouldn’t be my natural reaction.Stephen was stoned for what he preached and what did he do as he lay dying?And as they were stoning Stephen, he called out, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” And falling to his knees he cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep, Acts 7:59-60.Impossible, you think, to forgive your murderers, but not for Stephen, a man “full of grace” Acts 6:8.Aquila and Priscilla were run out of Rome, forced to leave their home because of persecution.What did they do?They set up shop in Corinth and offered Paul a place to stay for as long as he needed (Acts 18:1-3).Me? I probably would have pleaded a need for time to get organized and put my life back together before I put my home in the upheaval of a long term guest.Paul and Silas were beaten and thrown into prison.What was their reaction?About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, Acts 16:24.They were aware that “others were listening to them.”I’m not sure I would have been aware of anything but my own aches and pains, and completely unconcerned about what others were going through.And what did David do immediately after his child died?Then David arose from the earth and washed and anointed himself and changed his clothes. And he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped, 2 Sam 12:20.At this most horrible time for any parent, David worshipped.Is it really surprising?Job did the same thing, and he had lost all his children.Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped, Job 1:20.It seems that the natural reaction for a true child of God who undergoes any sort of trial is to turn to his Father, to serve, to worship, to pray, to sing, even to forgive.I am usually more interested in my own welfare than anyone else’s.I tend to forget anything spiritual and concentrate on my own physical or emotional pain as if it were the most important thing there is.Is that what a Christian should do?These people tell me otherwise, and I could have found many more examples.Truly I have a long way to go, but this maybe I can remember:If I have become a new creature, then what is “natural” about me, including my reactions, should have changed too.Now the natural man receives not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him; and he cannot know them, because they are spiritually judged. But he that is spiritual judges all things, and he himself is judged of no man, 1 Cor 2:14,15.Dene Ward

Keith’s mother once gave him a tiny orange tree, maybe six inches tall, which she had planted from seed into a coffee can. He brought it home, transplanted it into a black plastic nursery pot and set it next to the shed, continuing to water and feed it until he could find a permanent place for it.

It had grown to a height of three feet when he finally decided where to put it. Bending down, he grabbed the pot with both hands and tugged. Nothing happened. The tree had made its own decision, its roots bursting through the bottom of the pot and digging their way firmly into the ground. It’s still there, now over twice as tall as the shed and bearing fruit nearly year round.

Our children are like that little tree. Wherever you leave them is where they will put down roots. The atmosphere you raise them in, the people they spend the most time with, the friends they make and the activities they participate in, whether you are aware of them or not, will all have their effects on your children and will influence who they eventually become.

Children are growing every minute of every day, not only in body, but also in mind. You cannot set them aside until you have more time, you cannot leave them on their own without guidance, you cannot give them into the charge of another whose belief system does not match yours and still expect your children to follow in your footsteps. You cannot tell them, not even with all the sincerity you can muster, “Just wait till I finish this degree; just wait till my career is more established; just wait till I can pay off all these bills I ran up, then I will be a good parent to you.” If nothing else, you are teaching them exactly what is most important to you--career, status, “things.” Meanwhile, they may put down their roots in places you wish they never knew of, with people you wish they had never met, and develop a character that may appall you.

“Where did they learn that?” you might wonder. In the place where you left them while you were too busy to be a parent.

Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest,eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth.Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them!He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate, Psalm 127.

I was utterly confused when the older lady asked me about the bread recipe I had mentioned.

“Is it short?” she wanted to know.

The reply on the tip of my tongue was that it was about an inch high, but intuition told me that was not what she meant. Someone else came to my rescue then and I gradually realized over the first few years of married life that “short” in cooking had nothing to do with height.

Shortening does exactly what its name implies. It shortens the strands of gluten in a bread dough. In a quick bread, which doesn’t take hours to rest and rise, that is important. If it were not “shortened” it would be too tough to chew. So biscuits, cornbread and other un-yeasted breads are far shorter than yeasted ones.

Which shortening you choose makes a world of difference too. Butter, oils, meat fats, and plain old shortening are the most commonly used, and the texture and flavor you want determines which one. If you want a sandier texture, use oil; if you want a flakier texture, use shortening. If the flavor makes a difference, choose olive oil for Mediterranean breads and bacon fat for cornbread—if you are from the south, that is.

Some recipes call for a mix of two or more shortenings to produce the best of each. You want a great cookie? Click on my recipes on the left sidebar and then click on Almond Crunch Cookies, which use both oil and butter—great flavor plus sandy texture.

I prefer to keep my pie crusts plain so they won’t detract from the filling. To that end I use shortening only. It also makes a flakier crust. Others mix butter and shortening, but I can tell you from experience that an all butter pie crust is difficult to work with and tends to be heavy.

Then there is cornbread. I can tell from a recipe whether the cook is from up north or down south. Northerners use less cornmeal, a good bit of sugar, and either oil or melted butter as their shortening—except maybe some Midwesterners who live where pork is king. I nearly flipped when a television chef based in New York used 1 cup of cornmeal to three cups of flour. To a southerner, it’s called cornbread because it has both the taste and texture of dried corn, plus that wonderful yumminess of bacon in the background.

I have been trying to figure out what we Christians use as our shortening, and I think it has to be love. Love can change both the texture and flavor of what you do. Notice Mark 10:21: And Jesus looking upon him loved him, and said unto him, One thing you lack… Love made Jesus tell this young man, the one who had done well at keeping the law all his life, exactly what he lacked. Try doing that without love and see how far it gets you.

Sometimes love is tasty and easy to get down. Sticking your finger in cake batter is a whole lot nicer than doing the same with pie crust. One is far sweeter and has much more flavor than the other. So pats on the back, compliments and pep rally encouragement are easy to stomach. It doesn’t take any maturity to handle it well.

Sometimes love gets a little salty. Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. Col 4:6. Salt can sting an open wound, and sometimes that is exactly what we need—a sharp word to wake us up. That one is harder to handle, but what are we? Toddlers who still think that discipline means Mama and Daddy are mean, or adults who have learned the benefits of correction?

Keith grew up in a family where compliments were rare, almost non-existent. Until the day they died I never once heard his parents praise one of his sermons or Bible lessons. They viewed criticism as a way of helping, and if they didn’t love him why would they try to help at all? Most of the people up in those hills were exactly the same way. They appreciated plain speech, people saying what they mean and meaning what they say. They viewed pro forma compliments as hypocritical, and indeed, any teacher knows when the man shaking his hand and saying, “Good lesson,” means it and when he doesn’t.

And we should recognize the value of love in all its forms. When you know that a rebuke comes from a heart of love it is much easier to take, even a salty one—love shortens those tough strands of “gluten” and makes them tenderer and easier to chew on. Don’t ever dismiss a word of exhortation because it doesn’t taste good to you. God expects you to recognize the shortening and use the admonition to improve yourself whether you like its flavor or not. A friend of mine once tried to sift some biscuit mix to “get out all those lumps,” not realizing they were lumps of shortening. What she produced were the toughest biscuits anyone ever tried to eat. If you try to get rid of the rebuke, even if it is shortened with love, God won’t be happy with your end product either. In fact, the comment you get from Him when you try to excuse yourself from not listening is likely to be something like, “That’s tough!”

Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it... Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy… Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent…Psa 141:5; Prov 27:5,6; Rev 3:19.

Magdi is getting old. Her red coat is turning white. She cannot hear as well as she used to and often sleeps through things that have Chloe up and running. Her gait is crooked and her joints stiff. Sometimes she loses strength in her hind legs and they simply fall out from under her. But pick up a tennis ball, bounce it once or twice, hold it out for her to see, and instantly the years melt away. Her ears prick, her posture straightens, and she crouches ready to run as soon as you throw it. Her eyes practically will you to throw it. When you do, she runs as if she doesn’t hurt at all, and will even jump into the air like old times to snatch it on the bounce. This dog loves nothing more than to chase a tennis ball, and would do it until she collapsed if we let her.

If you have never visited with an older Christian, you should. I am no longer surprised by their life stories. Most of these good people have lived far more exciting lives than I, and have been through suffering I hope to never experience. The wisdom in their words will stand you in good stead if you pay attention.

Their knowledge of the scriptures is like that tennis ball to Magdi. They may sit and talk quietly, or hardly talk at all, but then you mention the Bible and it isn’t just a light that shines in their eyes, it’s a fire that starts burning and gets brighter as they continue. They seem to tap into a hidden energy source, sit up straighter and lean forward with an intent look that will burn itself into your heart, along with the accumulated knowledge and experience they want so badly to impart. It is their legacy, and too often we don’t claim it because old people are “boring”--visiting with them is simply a duty we fulfill as seldom as possible. Besides, who can count on their minds to be clear anyway—nothing useful can come from them. So our society trains us, and so we continue to make the foolish mistakes of the naïve when the help is there for the taking.

We have another problem in our society—the desire for instant gratification. Wisdom comes from accumulated experiences and from taking in the word of God—the source of all wisdom—on a regular basis year after year after year. The reason those older folks have a fire burning in their hearts is because they feed it daily. We are too immature to stick it out. We want it now—read a few chapters and become a sage overnight, or at least within a month or two, we seem to think. If we are not careful, when it comes our turn to be the old wise heads, we will have no fuel to burn, no warmth and glow to pass on to the next generation.

So today’s thought is two fold. Go visit some older folks. Sit and listen and take in what they have to offer. Then go home and get yourself ready to be that older generation. It takes more smarts, more strength, and more diligence than you think.

God, you have taught me from my youth; and I still declare your wondrous works. Yea, even when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not, until I have declared your strength unto the next generation, your might to every one that is to come. Psalm 71:17,18.

“Stop acting like a child!” has become a staple line of many arguments. Yet one time, Jesus said the very opposite.

Verily I say unto you, Except you turn, and become as little children, you shall in no wise enter into the kingdom of heaven, Matt 18:3. Unfortunately, whenever this event in Jesus’ life comes up in Bible classes, we totally ignore the context and instead start listing all the wonderful qualities of children. By the time we have finished, it’s a wonder we can’t find dozens of passages telling us to act like children instead of dozens telling us to grow up! Till we all attain unto the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a full-grown man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, Eph 4:13. Worse than that, we miss the point Jesus is making.

Look what was happening immediately before. The Twelve were arguing about which of them was the greatest in the kingdom. Surely that had something to do with Jesus’ admonition.

The verse after the one we all quote so often specifies, Whosoever shall humble himself as this little child…(v 4). What was it about this particular child? He had no status or rank, no wealth, and nothing to offer in worldly terms at all. All he did was come the minute he was called and trust the one who called implicitly. Don’t you think that made those men squirm in embarrassment at their previous behavior?

Then Jesus went on to add, But whoso shall cause one of these little ones that believe on me to stumble, it is profitable for him that a great millstone should be hanged about his neck, and that he should be sunk in the depth of the sea, v 6. Here He included those metaphorical children who would come to Him with the same humility and trust. How we treat them determines our fate as much as how we live our lives, or even how we worship or where.

Do you think the early disciples did not need this lesson? Besides their constant bickering about who was the greatest, those early churches had arguments about who had the greatest spiritual gift and who should get the most “floor time” with his gift, 1 Cor 12-14. They bragged about which preacher baptized them, 1 Cor 1. They showed off their wealth in bringing so much Lord’s Supper that it constituted a braggadocio feast instead of a memorial supper, 1 Cor 11. Their women had to be reminded not to dress up to show off their wealth, 1 Tim 2. They were told that how they received guests into their assembly could condemn them as easily as committing adultery or murder, James 2. Clearly, personal humility and acceptance of others regardless of rank was a lesson they needed from the beginning.

Why was that important? Because, as Jesus tells the sheep in that great parable of the judgment in Matt 25, when they wonder how they had served the Lord by feeding, clothing, and visiting him, he answers them this way, Inasmuch as you did it unto one of these my brethren, even these least, you did it unto me, Matt 25:40. Any time we reject a brother because we think we are better than he, whether because of wealth, education, race, or anything other consideration, we are rejecting the Lord for the same reason.

So the next time this passage comes up in Bible class, let’s see if, instead of listing all the sweet things our children do, we can actually get the lesson Jesus intended from it. It’s a whole lot more important than we seem to think.

And he took a little child, and set him in the midst of them: and taking him in his arms, he said unto them, Whosoever shall receive one of such little children in my name, receives me: and whosoever receives me, receives not me, but him that sent me, Mark 9:36,37.

I was reading a cooking magazine a few months ago which claimed to have formulated the best recipe for chicken and dumplings—one of my family’s favorite meals, as well as a great way to stretch a dollar of the weekly grocery budget. Halfway through the article I found a big problem.

This magazine is based in Boston, its editor from Vermont. I already had a suspicion what their “best” recipe would contain—big puffy dumplings resembling drowned biscuits. In the South, especially the poor rural south, most prefer flat “slicker style” dumplings, akin to noodles or pasta, enriched with egg yolks and sometimes butter, even chicken fat if possible.

Sure enough, near the end of the article we readers were informed that the panel of tasters greatly preferred the “Yankee style” dumplings (that was their wording, not mine), “except for two holdouts from Kentucky.” Really? Do you suppose if the magazine had been based in Atlanta, with the panel predominantly Southern, that the results might have been overwhelmingly in favor of the Southern style dumplings “except for two holdouts from Connecticut?”

Taste has a lot to do with your background, what you grew up eating, what your parents did and did not like, and what was available in your area. My boys loved fried okra. Some of the friends they brought home from college didn’t even know what it was, and were almost afraid to try it. We are blessed to live in a society so wealthy that we can choose what we like and don’t like. For most of us, eating has more to do with pleasure than necessity.

Unfortunately, that spoiled attitude has spilled over into our spiritual lives. We think we can take it or leave it as we choose, without ill effect; and if we take it, we think we can choose how we take it. Our Creator doesn’t get to choose how He wants to be served. We get to choose how, when, where, even if. We get to choose which parts of this law we want to follow, and which we want to ignore. We can even interpret it any way we like, even if our interpretation ignores the context or plainly contradicts another part of it. We get to do all this choosing and He must be satisfied with what we want, and what we like. No wonder anthropologists talk about Deity as something each culture creates.

Yes, each culture creates gods they want to worship, but that is not Deity. Until we understand that the concept of Deity does not involve our likes and dislikes at all, we will never be approved by that Deity. As long as we think our opinions matter, we are not serving God, we are simply serving ourselves.

God is immutable. Truth is absolute. Obedience is not a request but a demand. We can choose to disobey, but the consequences will not be pleasant.

Thus says Jehovah, the King of Israel, and his Redeemer, Jehovah of hosts: I am the first, and I am the last; and besides me there is no God. And who, as I, shall call, and shall declare it, and set it in order for me, since I established the ancient people? and the things that are coming, and that shall come to pass, let them declare. Fear not, neither be afraid: have I not declared unto you of old, and showed it? and you are my witnesses. Is there a God besides me? yea, there is no Rock; I know not any. Isa 44:6-8.

Despite its nickname, “The Sunshine State,” we have a lot of rain in Florida. One moment it is bright and sunny, and the next it is dark and breezy with angry black clouds boiling in the sky. Within minutes they open up as if Atlas himself were emptying a huge bucket over you. It will rain so hard that visitors often stand at the window watching in fear. Many have never seen anything like a tropical downpour. With us, it is just a matter of course. Less than half an hour later, the sun is out, the pavement steaming, and the puddles already soaking through the sandy soil.

Down here our umbrellas get a work-out. You carry one in each vehicle in case you get caught, and you keep one in the house as well. I have even known a few folks who keep one in the front closet at the meetinghouse. You just never know.

Yet as handy an invention as it is, umbrellas can be awkward. Trying to hold one on your shoulder with your chin while you lean over to unlock the chain on the gate without getting wet, is a neat trick I have yet to manage successfully. Something always gets wet—my head, my hand ands arms, my legs, or that part of me that sticks out when I bend over. At best it is clumsy. At worst it is hardly worth the trouble at all, so if it’s a light sprinkle, I just leave the umbrella in the car and get wet, but probably not any more wet than I would have gotten anyway. Imagine if you had to carry one all the time. What a nuisance!

Maybe that is why we so often do without our spiritual umbrellas. However, when I turn my life over to God, it is supposed to be just that—my life. Not just Sunday morning, not just moments of crisis, not just times when society and culture say I ought to act in a more spiritual way than usual. Christianity is an umbrella I carry everywhere. It covers every aspect of my life.

I am under its umbrella when I marry, when I raise my children, when I interact with my neighbors. That umbrella should be over me when I drive, when I shop, and when I talk with the repairman or the mechanic. I should be under its influence when the wait at the doctor’s office is long, when the order at the restaurant comes out not quite right, and when the bargaining starts at the car lot.

Having that umbrella over my head can be awkward at times. It might mean that I am occasionally taken advantage of. It might mean that my patience is sorely tested. It might mean that I must yield rights that my culture says I have the privilege to. In fact, I might even be ridiculed for carrying an umbrella in a place where no one else does—including a few card-carrying Umbrellians.

Living your life under that umbrella of Christianity has a lot of advantages though. An umbrella offers protection, but only if you keep it open. You can’t fold it up and leave it at home when it suits you, then expect it to automatically appear when you need it.

Do have your umbrella with you today? Is it open?

Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ…For you died, and your life is hid with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, shall be manifested, then shall you also with him be manifested in glory, Phil 1:27a; Col 3:3,4 .

For various reasons I have found myself remembering my junior high years lately. That time of life can be trying. You are not an adult, but you are not a little child either. In fact, you are not sure who you are.

Your body is behaving strangely and you have outgrown the cute stage. You are too fat or too skinny, taller than everyone else or shorter, too loud for the adults in your life, but too quiet to suit your peers. Your hair is too curly or too straight for the current style, and you never know what sort of face will greet you in the mirror each morning.

You begin to feel a need to embrace ideals but you are not sure which ones or why. The ones your peers embrace, even as they strive to rebel from the norm, seem just a little too empty and too “popular.” Where is the individuality they say they crave? The ones many teachers press on you seem to come with agendas attached. Do they teach these because they believe them and think they will help you, or because they want disciples?

But the thing we need to think about today is, what about us as parents? Of all people, we should be teaching ideals that will make our children’s lives better and their souls secure, but sometimes the things we do make that difficult for a child to see, especially one already confused by his mind and body, and the mixed signals he receives from everyone around him.

Help him out. Live by the ideals you teach. We tell him nothing is more important than his soul, but does he see that in us, or does he see far more time and money given to recreation and status-building than to the Lord, to worthy causes, to needy souls and spiritual pursuits? We tell him his eternal destiny is more important than physical wealth and security, but does he see us sacrifice spiritual matters for those very things time and time again? Does he ever see us engaged in personal Bible study or is the TV on 24 hours a day? Does he hear us preach honesty then hear us brag about cheating the tax man? Does he hear us talk about setting priorities, about being at the meetinghouse every time the door is open, while remembering that you have not spent any time with him, one on one, talking about spiritual things in the past six months or even longer? As young as he is, he understands that there is more to Christianity than sitting on a pew.

Adolescent rebellion is not unusual. It is part of discovering who you are—considering ideas, then rejecting them or accepting them. Don’t give your children an easy—and far more obvious reason than you would like to believe—to reject yours.

But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have known the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise unto salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. 2 Tim 3:14,15.

AuthorDene Ward has taught the Bible for more than forty years, spoken at women’s retreats and lectureships, and has written both devotional books and class materials. She lives in Lake Butler, Florida, with her husband Keith.