Spoof news stories from Sunday 21 October 2007

The 2007 Rugby World cup has been thrown into turmoil after English Newspaper, the Sun broke the news that full back Percy Montgomery was not eligible to play for the South Africans and as such the World Cup final and possibly the entire tournament...

The lunar calendar and more accurately the Mayan long calendar predicts 2012 to be the date when the gravity of the planet Venus negatively affects the Moon's lunar trajectory and causes disruptions in the weather patterns on the planet Earth.

Hollywood, California. Inspired to action by national events rippling through the Constitutional Advocate pool of advocates demanding separation of Church and State and their opposition advocating, well, the opposite, specifically all faith chapels in national and international air terminals, celebrity actor Tom Cruise and fading celebrity actor John Travolta have joined forces in...

District of Columbia (Scars and Tripes) - It began quietly enough last week when the Dalai Lama was presented the prestigious Congressional Gold Medal for his many years of selfless work with Tibetan llamas.

Washington Toast - Unable to answer whether water boarding is torture, the chairman of the Senate Judiciary committee invited the newly nominated Attorney General, Mr. Mukasey, to spend a few hours on a water board to help pluck a simple "yes&qu...

Buckingham Palace - (Ominous Mess): Panic has erupted in the ermine-lined corridors of power at Buck House as The Puppet Monarch's confident prediction of an England Rugby World Cup triumph bit the dust late last night.

Bogota, Colombia - (Associated Mess): An unemployed Colombian satirist has been reported as having sewn shut his mouth and locked himself behind a grotesque mask to demand the return of comedy to his beleaguered life.

Washington, DC - During a Giuliani campaign rally, an 8-year-old-boy asked him what he would do as President of the United States if it were discovered that alien life existed on another planet and it was hostile toward us. Without hesitation Giulian...

New York, New York - Concluding her U.S. promotional book tour of the Deathly Hallows in New York City this week, J.K. Rowling dropped the bomb on the pre-adolescent audience gathered at Carnegie Hall to meet their number one fantasy writer by announ...

Wall Street, New York (IP) - Our financial investigative reporter has discovered that mortgage borrowers have grown tired of being robbed blind by banks and other lenders and have gone on strike. This activity has caused a financial crisis of global...

London, Eng-er-land. - Scientists at the Institute of Physical Jerks in Norway believe they have isolated the rogue genetic sequence that causes British athletes to consistently blunder at important sports events.

The comet-haired physics teacher, Stanlonso Del Van Der Graaf Barber Shop Quintet Nucyulus-Sharpe, also known as Sweeney, WAS in the cupboard with Fambly, it was claimed a hundred years ago. And last night.

Detroit, Michigan - In a startling turnabout today George Nigelson announced that his formerly favorite pair of "Lucky" underwear had recently let him down so he is now officially downgrading their status to "Mildly Fortunate".