WHO I AM NOT

It’s actually “John P. Cusick,” but he went by “Jack.”

Jack Cusick (1928-1989) was a major league baseball player for both the Chicago Cubs and the Boston Braves. He was a shortstop; besides the name, this is probably the only connection I have with the guy (I played the same position for a short time in little league). He had a career batting average of .174, with two home runs and 22 RBIs. Looking at those stats one might argue that he wasn’t a great ballplayer; but he’s got his own Wikipedia page, so we’ve really no place to judge. His gravesite is somewhere in New Jersey, which is all the proof we need to know that this is not me.

Jake “Greasy Thumb” Guzik (1886-1956) was Al Capone’s business manager and “bag man.” According to the Chicago Tribune, Guzik not only demanded that a Yiddish newspaper stop denouncing him in editorials, but he also used the alias “Jack Cusick” in a sworn statement to police; he did this to keep his mother from finding out what he was doing. Aside from the name he used and his religious affiliation (Jewish), the only connection to here me is that he served a crime boss in Chicago and my family (both sides) comes from Chicago. Oh, and I, too, am concerned with my mother’s opinion.

If you’re looking for a house in Northern Georgia, though, he’s interested in helping you out, according to his website.

This is also Jack Cusick. He’s a real estate agent in Blue Ridge, Georgia. Although I assume he’s still very much alive and still selling real estate, I know this isn’t me because I haven’t had that much hair on the top of my head in over a decade.

I am, however, a big fan of his work.

The first time people hear my name, this guy pops into their heads. I am not related to John Cusack (that I know of), I have never met him (though I wouldn’t turn down the opportunity), and I am very definitely not him. Not even close.