The 9 SUPER-Craziest Things People Have Done After Getting Fired

Over at Ask Reddit, people share the absolute craziest things they (or someone they know) did after they were fired, and there's some seriously intense stories. I thought I was ~living on the edge~ for not fully cleaning my fridge food out when I was fired from a telemarketing job in college, but it turns out that was small potatoes. Here are the absolute most bonkers, bizarre, and, TBH, super-saddest stories on the thread:

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1. This guy is ballsy AF. "I worked at the Home Depot in college. I'm sure everybody knows how big the stores are, but they don't realize that even though you think there are only a handful of employees, there are actually a ton of orange-aproners in the store at any given time. In fact, my store had around 200 employees. There was this kindly old guy who worked high-ticket sales. He would walk down to lumber, pull down whatever he wanted (grabbing tools from the shelves), and proceed to build furniture in the back of the store. He was gifted, honestly. Chairs, tables, cradenzas [sic]; you name it, he built it. Everybody assumed that he was building these for displays or for the employee lounge, but nobody paid him much mind. Three months after I started working there, he left and never came back. Apparently he picked up the job so that he could get paid while building himself an entire houseful of goods. When he finished, he just walked out the door."

2. Nudity is always amazing. "We had a guy strip naked except for his boots and hard hat, then walked into the office to announce his retirement. He then walked out the gate, telling security, 'It almost feels like I forgot something today..'"

3. Penis humor never gets old. "Years ago at a job, this guy that worked there gave his two weeks verbally. The HR manager asked him to submit something in writing for her records. So he leaves and comes back a few minutes later with an envelope. HR manager opens it up and it's a piece of blank paper that he drew a giant set of dick and balls on then signed the bottom of it. She asked him if that's really what he would like to submit and he said yes. I still think about it to this day and smirk. What a genius way to do it."

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4. Eat (me) fresh! "At my old job, someone took a handful of pickles and beamed them at the wall while screaming that he was 'the goddamn best sandwich artist they would ever have.'"

5. Um, this is just awful and horrible? "Guy at my work drove around town at high speeds. Got into a high-speed car chase with the police and drove up to our building, got out and shot himself in the head."

6. This is also awful. "At my last job, our CFO was fired for mishandling company funds. He essentially had a mental breakdown and no one, including his family saw him for a week. There's parking garage footage from that day of him wandering out of the garage and a strange man no one knew coming to get his car hours later. He resurfaced after a week, strung out and in the same clothes."

7. Again, this is also awful. "I'm a business owner who has let employees go over the years. It's just part of the job. A couple of years ago I had a warehouse employee who just kept making mistakes. I sat down with the employee several times to go over procedures to eliminate the mistakes but nothing worked. Finally, I had to let him go. I called him into my office on a Friday morning, told him the situation, told him he'd be paid for the day, allowed him to collect his things, walked him to the door and said good bye. By about lunch time he came back into my office crying, telling me he can't let his wife know he was fired. I was sympathetic and can assure you that no employer actually likes firing people but he had just made too many mistakes. I told him so and he left. At the end of the day he came storming in, screaming how I'm threatened by him and he wasn't going anyplace. My sympathy was worn away at this point. His job wasn't exactly difficult and I had gone pretty far out of my way to try and help him do it properly. I was perfectly kind when I let him go and when he came back. I told him we're all going home for the weekend and if he didn't leave I was going to call the cops. That was fine by him and he refused to leave. I appealed as best I could that getting arrested wasn't going to solve any of his problems but he just kept cursing at me. Finally I called the cops, they dragged him out of the office, and arrested him. The best part though is he later used me as a professional reference."

8. Crafty! "Not crazy, but clever: guy gets fired and before he left he sets his voice mailbox to send the managers ranting and disparaging voicemail messages — using the 'future-delivery' feature — every week. they didn't know how to manage their voicemail system well so they had to pay their phone vendor to come and make it stop after it went on for a month or two. I was the tech to roll and fix it."

9. Started at the top, now it's coming out his bottom. "Guy at my old job took a shit in his bottom desk drawer in his cube."

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