Hey Everyone, I lost my dad when I was 21 years old, he suffered from a major heart attack he was only 53. Three years later my mom aged 55 is diagnosed with acute Leukimia. I was by her side for all of her treatments, watched her get sicker and weaker until her body coudnt fight anymore... 6 monthes later she was gone..... Im 24 years old and everyday I think I have some type of cancer, Im always going to the doctor and they keep telling me theres nothing wrong and its all in my head. I feel like I cant enjoy life cause Im always thinking I have some type of cancer.

My friends think I should talk to someone about this but Im very private and I already have a hard time opening up to them. I worried all the time and its starting to affect my life.

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walkingtall (07-23-2011)

Sounds like you are suffering from depression and anxiety and you really need to see your dr and tell them how you are feeling. Keep a healthy diet. Sounds like you are still grieving as well. Time heals those wounds. Please talk to your dr.

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lisa5011 (07-23-2011)

I'm sorry for your losses. I lost both my parents by the time I was 19. My father had pulmonary fibrosis and my mom less that three years later had a brain aneurysm. They were both 53 when they died. I also used to think I would die young because of this. But I am now 61 years old and am still here. You probably should talk to someone, whether it is a friend or counselor. I know it is a terrible loss and you will always look back and wish they were with you. It will get better with time.

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my dad in June, he was 55. It just came as a big shock. Every time someone would come up to me to condole me, I'd say something like well we're all going to go someday. I realized that I didn't like the impression my thought process gave people so I stopped saying it.

Now I feel I'm more silent and don't smile as much as i used to. I also read a lot of news of people dying everyday (not to feel better about myself, just to know that what happened was natural and try to accept it). Maybe it's because I am the eldest and my brother and sister still need to be looked after I've become very private and only have one or two people who I can share stuff with.
I've learnt not to predict death. Though I do think that everyday about my relatives and aunts, uncles and my mom especially, what's going to happen if they die and I'm left alone.

I never made a lot of loyal friends because I've moved around a lot, somehow I feel I should find all the strength I need from within myself.
I'm not really worried about myself dying, just worried about the people I'll leave behind, especially if I die young and have children.

I hope you can overcome your problems. Maybe you could talk to a psychiatrist or a therapist. Sometimes it helps if you don't know them.