Possible Fraternity Prank Causes Evacuation, SWAT Team Search Of House

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Pranks are funny, but fraternity pranks are hilarious. As a group, we’re just exponentially better than anyone else at pulling pranks. Who delivered the medical school cadavers to the alumni dinner? Who is responsible for the underwear-filled trees every Halloween? Who makes the toilets explode every spring? Yeah, that’s right. That’s us.

Why do we pull the best pranks? Well, aside from the fact that we’re awesome at them, we have the best resources available. By resources, I mean pledges, money, and years upon years of experience passed down through the generations. Unfortunately, every now and then, pranks go wrong. Sometimes, pranks go wrong because of poor planning, lack of preparation, or just plain bad luck. Other times, they fail simply because the prank itself is just stupid.

The following is one of the dumbest pranks I’ve ever seen.

An anonymous caller using an internet application contacted the police in Kenilworth, New Jersey, disguised his voice, and reported that there were pipe bombs inside a local residence and that two individuals were being held hostage. According to the the call, a Kean University student was holding his brother and sister as hostages.

The authorities evacuated homes nearby, while HazMat and SWAT personnel entered the building where the bomb and hostages were supposedly located. After clearing the house, law enforcement officials brought a man out of the building in handcuffs. The man, a Kean University student and member of a fraternity, had no knowledge of any bombs or hostages in the house. After a three hour investigation of the premises, no hostages or explosives were found.

The student that was apprehended is believed to be the victim of an extremely messed up prank. Police reported that whoever made the call was very familiar with the layout of the house’s interior, which is rented by members of the aforementioned student’s fraternity. For me, that gives some pretty good leads as to who made the call.

1. A member of the fraternity made the call to fuck with one of his brothers.
2. A disgruntled ex-pledge made the call to get revenge for being blackballed.
3. Members of a rival chapter made the call to mess with their enemy, or to get revenge for a previous prank.

Police are still investigating the hoax and the student in question is being fully cooperative with their efforts. After several hours, residents of nearby houses were able to return to their homes. For any of you out there who are planning pranks on rival houses, remember the basic rules of pranking: keep it simple, don’t be stupid, and don’t get caught.

BlutarskyTFM (@BlutoGrandex) is a contributing writer for Total Frat Move and Post Grad Problems, the self-appointed Senior Military Analyst for TFM News, founder of the #YesAllMenWhoWearHawaiianShirts Movement, and, on an unrelated note, a huge fan of buffets. While by no means an athletic man, he was the four-square champion of his elementary school in 1997. When not writing poorly organized columns or cracking stupid, inappropriate jokes on Twitter, Bluto pretends to be well-read, finds excuses not to exercise, and actually has a real job.