Hello gang, we missed you! But we are back to check in. Ross is very pregnant. On this episode, for the entire 54 minutes, we discuss various perineal massage techniques that Patrick is reading about in the Penny Simkin classic, The Birth Partner.

Well shit is really really fucking weird right now, huh? No one knows anything about what the next several months will be like, but that doesn’t mean Ross and Patrick can’t answer some questions for you. They’ve got solicited advice for the folks who wrote in. They hope this episode will keep you entertained and maybe even a little informed while you pull yourself away from the news long enough to cry on the toilet.

This is a very special episode! Ross and Patrick check in for a few minutes to start the show and then we go to a hotel in the middle of Pennsylvania to listen in as Patrick tries to learn how to be a dad from his comedy pal Glen Tickle. Glen has two daughters, a wife, a comedy album called “(Yes, Really),” and a brand new special called “Good Grief: A Comedy About Loss and Being Bad At It.” He’s an all around great guy and a hilarious comic. Check him out at www.glentickle.com. Buy his new special there for download!!

Money, money, money, mooonnneeeyyy. Moooonnneeeyyy! Ya know, like the song. Ross and Patrick coming to you post couple’s business meeting so they needed to unpack said business immediately. Not as fun as sex but equally as uncomfortable to talk about. Sounds fun, right?

Well they’re back from the tropics and they’re depressed. However, it felt like Christmas morning on Sunday in Brooklyn because after a week apart, they finally reunited with PEGGY! So all is not lost – least not in the Holbertineau house – but the nation is a full blown nightmare. While on their magical vacation in Puerto Rico, Ross and Patrick still kept tabs on the White House of Horrors and the democratic shim sham, and most importantly The Bachelor. Tune in to hear all about the food, the beach, the relaxation, and the tv watching. They missed you!

This week Ross and Patrick are back to bouncing around from topic to topic. They know you missed that. While they prepare to be parents, they’re willing to dish out all the unsolicited relationship advice you didn’t ask for. Ross is reading about how to be a French parent, while Patrick wants to be the next bachelor. Come along for the bumpy ride all to the tune of the Backstreet Boys. It makes sense if you listen so just do it.

A day late and several dollars short, happy 2020 everybody! We hope all your New Year dreams come true. On this episode we recap a week of revelry in the great state of Maine. It’s a silly one- Patrick now does manual labor for work and Ross was kind enough to listen to his self pity for an hour. Enjoy!!

Pregnancy, sonograms, Whitesnake, oh my! What do these things have in common? Absolutely nothing of course. Somehow Patrick and Ross end up talking about 80’s hair metal after they’ve subjected you to the literal ins and outs of their first OBGYN appointment. Friends, the fever dream continues. Don’t you want to see how it all plays out?

It’s been two weeks since you’ve heard from Ross and Patrick and they’ve missed you terribly. Don’t worry- everything is ok. They just went on vacation aaaaaannnnndddd got some major life news. So they put a pin in it and now they’re back to overshare and answer all the questions you never asked.