If you think the continuing conflict over Palestine is bad, if you thought the Spanish Inquisition was horrible, if you thought the Holocaust was awful, well then just wait until you catch wind of Miranda and Orlando's religious rift you are absolutely right. Those are unquestionably three low points in human history.

Frankly, the list of godawful (pun intended) tragedies caused by religious strife and deity-centered persecution is longer than Alexander Skarsgård's perfect peen and nearly twice as intimidating. Furthermore, if this recent interview with supermodel Miranda Kerr is any indication, it just got a little longer!

(The list, we mean, not the perfect peen — apologies for a literal dangling modifier.)

In case you weren't paying attention, Miranda just made one heck of a confession:

She was seeing another man! She was having an affair with her Lord & Savior, Jesus H. Christ!!! Yup, Miranda is a self-proclaimed Christian who prays every single day of her life!

Which is fine, obvs. We should all have hobbies!

But what if God was one of us, just a stranger on a bus got between Miranda her soon-to-be ex-husband Orlando Bloom? What if that's what divided their seemingly happy family?

In her Telegraph interview, the model mom was asked about being Buddhist and she squashed those rumors like a fat, juicy bug.

Miranda admitted:

"No, I'm not Buddhist. Orlando is… I'm not Buddhist. I'm Christian. I pray every day. I meditate every day and I do yoga. I'm not religious, I'm spiritual. And praying is something my grandmother taught me as well. To pray and be grateful, have gratitude, is a big thing for me."

Wow! What a telling quote! Clearly Christianity is important to her! Plus, isn't her family's skincare line called Divine??!

It sounds like religion was a major rift in the power couple's relationship! We wonder if it eventually tore them apart?

25 comments to “Is Orlando Bloom Divorcing Miranda Kerr Because She Cheated On Him With Jesus?! Holy Split!!”

First of all, to insinuate that religion was the cause of their breakup simply because he's Buddhist and she's Christian is super presumptuous. In no way did she imply that it had anything to so with their divorce - she simply stated a fact. Secondly, to refer to religion and prayer as a "hobby" is very offensive. Billions of people devote their lives to different religions, faiths, and forms of prayer. It's more than just a pastime. Anyways, love Miranda and Orlando and their little baby Flynn is hands down the cutest baby in Hollywood! I hope they find happiness wherever their paths lead them.

This is by far the most ignorant post on your website. You glorify all of the wrong things. Idiots. I'm embarrassed for you. Your beliefs and Christianity are much more important than any earthly relationship.

"Which is fine, obvs. We should all have hobbies!" - Here we go again: the old double standard. Chastise a Christian (or anyone else for that matter) for having opinions, and the everyone gets their panties in a bunch. Call Christianity a "hobby," and it's fine to go there. Ugh. Perez, you sound like an uneducated teenager. Why not give us the scoop on our favorite celebrities without the subtle bashing??? You seem to promote acceptance and tolerance on one end of the coin, and then love to stick in your intolerance subtly into other articles. For a guy who chants anti-bullying war cries, you sir are the antithesis of that. Start by practicing your so-called intolerance before you are willing to preach it, Mr. Hilton.

So it's not okay for Christians to say something that could possibly hurt your feelings, but you call prayer a "hobby"? I'm a devout Christian and I find this offensive and don't understand the difference between you bullying us but when somebody says anything remotely offensive about your culture, you fly off the handle. I used to be a huge Perez fan but it's the constant hypocritical posts like these that make me not want to visit your site. I pray that you somehow find Jesus Perez.

"We should all have hobbies!". Wow. Perez is always jumping down people's throat about being offensive, and being PC, but then he comes out and says this. That's offensive to Christians to amount their religion to a hobby.
I'm so tired of Perez's hypocrisy.

Yes, praying is a fucking boring hobby. Stop complaining, you are just low minded if you still think there's a God helping you. It's so old fashioned. And not having the same religion , even if I think Buddhism is more a way a living, is a great deal in a couple, even between friend. It's the same as not having the same political preferences.

11 million people were murdered during the Holocaust (including Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, homosexuals, people with disabilities, and Gypsies, among other groups targeted - and well over a million of them were children). Studies show that the divorce rate among celebrities is 70-78% with the majority of the divorcing celebrities attributing it to infidelity and dishonesty. Thus, regardless of whether the divorce is due to religious differences or not, the odds were the celebrity marriage was more likely to fail than not. To compare a failing celebrity marriage that allegedly may be failing due to religious differences based on mere speculation to something as horrifying as the Holocaust (which was fueled by the ignorant goal of creating a superior race, not necessarily just religion) is not only insulting but just as ignorant. As a public figure with a large following, you should be more aware of what is appropriate and what is considered going "too far," as your career is sustained solely by those who follow you. Just some food for thought.

I'm Christian (regular church attendance), but don't force it on others. Shouldn't they be more concerned with their respective religions views on the sanctity of marriage and how they can sort it out?

I just want to state I am a Christian and I am not offended … To her it probably is a hobby since she doesn't practice the religion. " I'm not religious, I'm spiritual " There are so called Christians out there who have the faith and say I am christian but don't practice it.

How DARE you try to compare the Holocaust or conflicts to a celebrity split or poke fun of them. Countless people lost their lives over these unfortunate events. You seriously are a piece of shit for comparing celebrities to such dark periods in world history.

It's called putting 2 and 2 together. Also a hobby is a regular activity done for pleasure typically during leisure so prayer can be a hobby." No, I'm not Buddhist. Orlando is… I'm not Buddhist. I'm Christian." She is defining that difference/separation between them so I think this article is correct because she herself is insinuating it. I would also like to say that she is not devoted to Christianity as a religion she states "I'm not religious, I'm spiritual"

Re: Golri – "Yes, praying is a fucking boring hobby. Stop complaining, you are just low minded if you still think there's a God helping you. It's so old fashioned." A Hobby is not boring to the one who practices it that's why it's called a Hobby… nobody asked you to take up praying lolz

Yeah, she seems like a lot of Christians - flaunting her body, cheating on her husband with Bieber of all people and generally making a spectacle of herself. I believe it. The hypocrisy doesn't fall far from the Bible.

Re: Say What? – living a lifestyle thats in conflict with the faith ones professes with is not a monopoly of Christians. To some, religion is a just a form of convenience. Im a Christian and being judgemental is unchristian but i cant help agreeing with you on Miranda. So that makes me of the same ilk as hers just like lots of Christians as you said. Seriously tho I pray(not as a hobby) that we both rise from the pit to be worthy of our faith.

Am glad that her brand of 'spirituality' did not seem to rub on Orlando as he appears to be decently grounded. And with the way she is behaving, I guess she needs to pray more. With God's help(yeh, I believe in it) all is not lost on these two as a family.

Re: Say What? – The only difference between you and me is that if I say bullshit, I know I'll have to pay the price. You, however, you preach in the belief that no matter the filthy blasphemies coming out of your mouth, you will never suffer the consequences… Then the mere fact to argue with a coward like you, it gonna left me an unpleasant impression, similar as if by madness, I would choose to argue in vain, in a sterile argument lost in advance with the devil in person.. And I know that I'm a little crazy in my way, but I would never approve such hypocritical attitude like yours.. (Add here the disapproving gaze of the typical African-American who, at the same time, shakes her head)

First off, I've always *assumed* this chick was full of it; I distinctly remember her (…yes, HER on live tv straight from her own mouth) saying she converted to Buddhism. This was back when reports of her and Orlando were "secretly dating" started to surfaced. Sure she could've changed her mind and blah, blah, blah…. But back then there were people who'd claimed to know her, claiming she was lying about the whole Buddhist thing and that it was just part of her ploy to whim over Orlando. Now she has Oly out of her system, she's back to praying to Jesus again? Sister please. Second off; Perez for the love of all things holy, NEVER EVER dis someone's beliefs. Buddhists have NOTHING against Christians - I know because I was raised as a Christian and several years ago converted over to Nichiren Buddhism. If I'm not mistaken Oly is apart of Soka Gakkai. Altho Sokians are somewhat considered an occult form of Nichiren Buddhism, to the best of my knowledge they don't have anything against the Christian faith or any other faith for that matter. So to report their marriage went south because she prays to a different God is irreverent.

But now, that's all about to change, at least according to TMZ! That's because a week from tomorrow -- on December 17 -- Khloé and Lamar's split will be legal, final, and FULL! And that's all she wrote!

As the final divorce docs are set to be stamped by a judge on that day just over a week from right now, the final terms are pretty standard and straightforward, too: