LATER THIS AFTERNOON AND SOME OF THOSE COULD BECOME STRONG. HAVE A GOOD DAY. "FLASHPOINT" IS NEXT. CAPTIONING PROVIDED BY: U.S. CAPTIONING COMPANY, DEPERE, WI GOOD MORNING AND WELCOME TO FLASHPOINT! HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY. THANK YOU FOR JOINING US THIS MORNING. TODAY WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT MOTHERS. NOW BEFORE YOU TURN THE CHANNEL, REMEMBER YOU'RE EITHER MARRIED TO ONE, YOUR MOM IS ONE, YOU WORKED FOR ONE OR YOU HAVE ONE AS AN EMPLOYEE. SO WHEN IT COMES TO MOTHERS, THEY'RE VERY MUCH A VERY BIG PART OF YOUR LIFE AND IT REALLY IS WHAT MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED. TODAY I HAVE ASSEMBLED WHAT WILL BE A VERY ENLIGHTENING AND ENTERTAINING PANEL OF SOME OF MY GOOD FRIENDS WHOM I ENJOY NOT JUST IN PERSON BUT OVER THE INTERNET. LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO MY PANEL TODAY AND THE STATE OF MOTHERHOOD. JOINING ME IS THE PRESIDENT OF CNL BANK AND SANDY AND I MET AWHILE BACK WHEN YOU WERE RUNNING THE CAMPAIGN FOR THE HEART OF FLORIDA AND THE UNITED WAY. YOU HAVE RAISED MILLIONS OF DOLLARS FOR LOCAL CHARITIES AS WELL AS BEING THE PRESIDENT OF THE BANK AND I'M EXCITED TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THE STATE OF MOTHERHOOD. WE HAVE MY GOOD FRIEND DEION WHO YOU MIGHT KNOW AS THE HOT MESS MOM. SHE HAS A NATION, ONE OF THE TOP BLOGS IN THE NATION AND SHE HAS WONDERFUL THINGS TO SAY. AND MY OTHER FAVORITE BLOGS IS MOMS AT WORK BY THE ORLANDO SENTINEL SO I INVITED OVER THE SENIOR PRODUCER OF THE AUDIENCE ENGAGEMENT TEAM AND ALSO CONTRIBUTOR WITH THE MOMS AT WORK BLOG. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE. SANDY, OKAY. THIS IS WHAT I LOVE ABOUT SANDY. SHE'S ALWAYS PUT TOGETHER AND LOOKS WONDERFUL AND HAS TWO GROWN FABULOUS SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN AND MY ROLE MODEL WHEN IT COMES TO PRIMARILYISM AND MOTHERHOOD. NOT TO MENTION YOU PROBABLY HAVE SEVERAL DIFFERENT WOMEN OF ALL AGES AND WHAT DO YOU FEEL IS THE STATE OF MOTHERHOOD? MOTHERHOOD IS A WONDERFUL THING AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN. I THINK WE SHARED ON THAT CONVERSATION RECENTLY WHAT I AM THERE WITH IS I SEE A LOT OF WOMEN STILL STRUGGLING OF TRYING TO BALANCE WORK AND MOTHERHOOD AND SO I STILL THINK AND THE REASON I'M SHOCKED BY THAT IS OUR CHILDREN COMING ON AND ALMOST 28 AND GOING TO 24. AND THAT WAS MORE UNDERSTANDABLE AND BACK AT THE TIME I'M A BANKER AND SPENT THE FIRST 5 OR 10 YEARS OF MY CAREER THAT I WASN'T A TELLER. NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH BEING A TELLER. IT'S AN IMPORTANT POSITION IN THE BANK. BUT IT WAS SO UNUSUAL FOR WOMEN AT THAT POINT TO BE THE WEATHER. AND IT IS GOING TO BE GETTING OVER THAT RELATIVELY QUICKLY AND, YEAH, AT FIRST AND ESPECIALLY WHEN I FIRST CAME BACK TO WORK I FELT LIKE IT WAS A REAL AMERICAN AIRLINES OLMOST A NEGATIVE SO I REALLY RARELY TALKED ABOUT MY CHILDREN WHICH I'M EMBARRASSED TO SAY TODAY. AND I DIDN'T HAVE A LOT OF PICTURES ON MY DESK OF MY CHILDREN AND I'M MORE EMBARRASSED ABOUT THAT. BACK THEN YOU TRY TO HIDE THE FACT AND THAT'S BACK IN THE DAY WHEN I TRY TO DROP LIKE A BANKER AND IT LOOKS LIKE A MAN. YOU'RE STILL SO PUT TOGETHER AND I GUESS AS YOU MENTOR THE YOUNGER WOMEN IN YOUR COMPANY AND IT'S A VERY LARGE COMPANY AND WELL KNOWN AND OBVIOUSLY LOTS OF YOUNG WOMEN AND YOUNG MOTHERS IN YOUR PROFESSION AND HOW DO YOU MENTOR THEM AS THEY MOVE THROUGH MOTHERHOOD AND PROFESSIONS AT THE SAME TIME AND IT IS SORT OF A FINE LINE. I WILL SAY THIS. SOME THINGS HAVE GOTTEN BETTER. I THINK EMPLOYERS ARE ABSOLUTELY MORE CONSCIENTIOUS THAT WOMEN ARE A VERY IMPORTANT PART OF OUR SUCCESS. I'LL BE HONEST. THEY TEND TO BE SERVICE ORIENTED AND WE COULDN'T OPERATE WITHOUT THEM. AND WE ARE ALSO VERY SUPPORTIVE OF FAMILIES AND I THINK TODAY THAT IS IMPROVED. WITH THE FLEXIBILITY? THE FLEXIBILITY AND SOME OF THE BENEFITS ARE BETTER NOW FOR WOMEN AND, AND AWARENESS. I THINK AWARENESS IS SO MUCH BETTER AND WHAT I REALLY TRY TO SAY TO YOUNG MOTHERS IS KEEP GOING AND LISTEN TO NO ONE ELSE BUT YOUR OWN INNER VOICE. THAT'S LIFE! AND I SPEND A LOT OF TIME LISTENING TO MOMS AT WORK AND IT'S NICE WHEN YOU WORK FOR THE COMPANY AND PEOPLE LIKE SAND WHOA ACKNOWLEDGE THE FACT THAT HOME LIFE IS IMPORTANT AND THAT CHILDREN ARE IMPORTANT AND LET'S FACE IT MOST DON'T REALLY GIVE YOU THE SAME KIND OF LEEWAY YOU MAY NEED TO BALANCE THINGS IN LIFE. WHAT'S THE MAJOR CONCERN ABOUT PEOPLE ON YOUR BLOG? I THINK OUR COMPANY IS REALLY GOOD. THE ORLANDO SENTINEL IS REALLY GOOD. WITH FLEX FINE FOR GOOD AND SOMEONE THAT HAD TO USE THAT BECAUSY WORK ONLINE AND SOMETIMES I'LL HAVE TO WRITE AT HOME AND SOMETIMES CHECK EMAIL AT HOME BUT ONCE IN AWHILE IF MY SON IS SICK AND I HAVE A LOT TO DO THAT DAY, I'LL ASK IF I CAN WORK REMOTELY AND I HAVE EVERYTHING AT HOME THAT I HAVE AT WORK AND IT'S WONDERFUL. AND THAT'S THE ONLINE THING. WE'LL GET TO THE HOT BUTTON IN A MINUTE AND YOU CAN SEE THAT ALL ONLINE. LET ME SAY THIS. AS YOU START WHAT'S THE MAIN THING FROM THE STATE OF MOMS TODAY AND WHAT'S THE HARDEST THING YOU BROUGHT AS THE WORKING MOTHER? I FEEL GUILTY SOMETIMES THAT I WORK MORE THAN I SPEND TIME WITH MY SON AND THERE ARE TIMES HE WILL COME TO ME AND I MENTION THIS IN A BLOG TODAY IN A POST I WROTE AND SOMETIMES HE'LL SAY I NEED MORE TIME WITH YOU, MOM. AND LAST NIGHT I WAS ON THE COMPUTER FOR A COUPLE OF HOURS DOING THINGS I NEEDED TO DO BUT I TOOK THE TIME AND SPEN SPENT IT WITH HIM AND HE WASN'T FEELING WELL AND I NEED TO PUT HIM FIRST. SO HOT MESS. YOU DECIDE TO LEAVE CORPORATE AMERICA, START THIS BLOG AND TALK ABOUT HOW LIFE REALLY IS A HOT MESS. I LOVE YOUR BLOG BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I RELATE TO A LOT OF IT. WHEN I'M NOT ON TELEVISION WITH MY LIPSTICK AND SPANX AND PERFECT HAIR AND MY LEGS ARE NOT SHAVED. I KNOW SANDY'S ARE! AND SHE'S LIKE PERFECT AND THE REST OF US WE LIVE IN THIS HOT MESS WORLD AND DO OUR BEST TO TRY TO GET BY AND LIVE THIS ILLUSION FOR EVERYBODY ELSE AND THAT IS WHAT YOU WRITE ABOUT AND WHY PEOPLE FOLLOW YOU. I'M MAD. IS THAT A QUESTION? I KNOW YOU'LL HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY. YES. BECAUSE AND KIND OF PUTTING ALL THESE I GUESS QUESTIONS INTO ONE ANSWER I THINK THAT WE ARE WOMEN TODAY AND EXPECTED TO DO EVERYTHING AND TO DO EVERYTHING WELL SO WE HAVE TO BE A PERFECT PARENT, PERFECT EMPLOYEE, PERFECT BOSS, PERFECT NEIGHBOR, PERFECT HOMEMAKER AND IT ALL HAS TO GET DONE ASK WE'RE THE ONES TO DO IT AND INEFIT ABILITY IT CAN'T BE DONE SO I THREW IN THE TOWEL, OPENED THE VODKA AND STARTED TO EMBRACE IT AND IF I HAVE TO GO TO BED WITH DIRTY DISHES, I GO TO BED WITH DIRTY DISHES. AND IF I HAVE TO PULL THE KIDS OUT OF SPORTS ONE SEASON TO TRAVEL AND CAN'T DO BOTH, THEN, YOU KNOW WHAT? MISSING SOME SPORTS WON'T KILL THEM. IT'S NOT JUST BEACHING ON YOUR SITE. YOU ARE CONSTRUCTIVE WITH HOW PEOPLE CAN MANAGE, RIGHT? I THINK YES. I BITCH, TOO. AND I THINK PEOPLE HOLD THEMSELVES AND WOMEN SPECIFICALLY HOELZ THEMSELVES TO THE STANDARD THEY WOULD NOT HOLD ANYONE ELSE TO. THAT'S SUCH A GREAT COMMENT. THAT IS THE BEST COMMENT I'VE HEARD ABOUT DESCRIBING MOTHERHOOD BECAUSE THERE IS NO ROLE AND I MAKE A LOT OF JOKES AND I TOLD MY MOM I WAS GOING TO LATER IN LIFE THAT I BECAME A BANK PRESIDENT BECAUSE THERE WAS NO WAY IN THE WORLD I WOULD BE THE KIND OF MOTHER SHE WAS. THAT I COULD NEVER MATCH WHAT SHE DID AND PART OF THAT IS WE HOLD MOTHERHOOD UP HERE AND NOTHING LESS THAN PERFECT IS WHAT WE'RE SHOOTING FOR. I TELL A STORY WHEN I SPEAK A LOT ABOUT I FORGOT THE SNACK BASKET. WHO HASN'T DONE THAT? I ALMOST QUIT WORK OVER IT AND LUXY HE MY HUSBAND SAID OKAY, YOU CAN QUIT WORK BUT THEN YOU'RE STILL GOING TO HAVE TO COME TO THE REALIZATION YOU ARE NOT GOING TO BE PERFECT EVEN IF YOU QUIT WORK. WHEN WE COME BACK WE'LL TALK ABOUT THE OTHER HALF BECAUSE ALL OF US HAVE OTHER HALVES WE'RE VERY FORTUNATE TO HAVE AND LATER ON IN THE SHOW WE'LL TALK ABOUT THE BRAND NEW AND INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT MILK BANQUET COMING TO FLORIDA TO HELP MOTHERS WITH THE TINIEST OF BABIES TO THRIVE AND SURVIVE. WELCOME BACK. TALKING ABOUT THE STATE OF MOTHERHOOD AND I WANT TO TALK ABOUT SIGNIFICANT OTHER. I GREW UP IN A FEMINIST HOUSEHOLD. MY MOTHER WAS A STAY AT HOME MOM AND SHE STILL WORKS PERIODICALLY. SHE'S A TEACHER. MY FATHER WAS THE BREAD WINNER. BUT I GREW UP THINKING I COULD DO WHAT I WANTED TO AND MARRY WHO I WANTED TO BECAUSE I WOULD EARN MY OWN LIVING AND NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT DEPENDING ON OTHER PEOPLE FINANCIALLY. I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT CAME IN MY HEAD BUT NOW I DON'T KNOW THAT I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT IT. I DON'T KNOW IF I FEEL FEMINIST ABOUT IT NOW AND THEY MIGHT BE MISSING OUT AND HAVE THE TIME WHERE I WISH I WAS HOME WITH MY KIDS A LOT OF THE TIME. DO YOU FEEL THERE WAS A SHIFT? GOING FROM THE FEMINIST TIME WHERE YOU FOUGHT FOR THE TOP AND ALL OF A SUDDEN AS YOU TALK TO YOUR OWN CHILDREN HAS IT CHANGED A LITTLE BIT? HAVE YOU MODERATED ON BEING THE WORK HORSE OR YOU CAN STAY AT HOME WITHOUT FEELING LIKE THE BAD THING. SFE, AND I AM UNDERSTANDING OF IT BECAUSE I LOOK AT MY MOTHER AND THOUGHT I'M GOING TO GO DOWN AND MY MOM STAYED HOME AND SHE'S BETTY CROCKER AND HOMEMADE COOKIES AND BREAD AND JUST UNBELIEVABLE. DID YOU THINK IT WAS A GOOD THING OR ASPIRED FOR MORE? I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD AUTOBIOGRAPHY AND MY MOM WAS SAYING YOU NEED TO BE A NURSE BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE A GOOD PROFESSION WHEN YOU DECIDE TO STAY HOME. SHE JUST KNEW I'D STAY HOME. MY DAD IN THE OTHER EAR IS SAYING. AND GIRLS ASPECTER DOCTORS. THAT'S MY GENERATION. IT'S CRAZY BECAUSES AN INFLUENCE ON WHAT YOU WANT TO DO AND YOU HAD TO CARVE A NICHE TO BE HOME WITH YOUR CHILDREN. I HAVE A UNIQUE PERSPECTIVE AND WE WON'T BE JUDGED IF YOU WANT TO WORK OR STAY HOME. I WORKED THE FIRST 10 YEARS I HAD CHILDREN. MY HUSBAND TRAVELS AND I'M GLAD I DID IT. AS STRESSFUL AS IT WAS IT LOOKS LIKE ANY OF THE CHILDHOODS BASICALLY AT ALL AND I COULDN'T HAVE BEEN HOME AND LIKE MY PERSONALITY I COULD NOT HAVE SENT HEME WITH 3 KIDS UNDER 3 AND I WAS NOT TO GO IN THE PARK AND ANDIS, I REMEMBER TALKING ABOUT THE DEVICE AND IT COMES UP THAT MOMS THAT WORK VERSUS MOMS WHO STAY HOME AND THEY WANT TO CONTINUE TO DIVIDE US BUT THERE IS THAT SHIFT AND I WISH I WOULD HOLD MY HEAD OR I HAD 4 HOURS TO WORK OUT TODAY AND, YOU KNOW, DOO YOU FIND THAT MOMS AT WORK AND LOTS OF COMMENTS ABOUT THOSES? I THINK WE GET A LOT OF COMMENTS ON BOTH SIDES. THE PRIMARY AUDIENCE IS ALSO PORK AND THEN WOMEN WHO STAY AND IF I COULD STAY HOME I THINK I WOULD DO THAT. GOING A LITTLE SIR CRAZY BUT I REALLY ENJOY WORKING AND DO THE BEST I CAN TO BALANCE MY TIME WITH WORK AND MY TIME AT HOME AND MY SON HAS TO COME FIRST AND THERE ARE TIMES HE'S SICK AND I CAN WORK AT HOME AND MOST OF THE TEAM IT WORKS OUT BECAUSE I WORK REMOTELY AND HAVE THE ONLINE CAREER. AND IT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING. CAN I TALK ABOUT BALANCE REAL QUICK? SURE. SHE MAKES, SHE MAKES A LIVING RIGHT NOW. OTHER THAN HOT MESS MOM THERE ARE, WHAT IS THIS CALLED? A TUMBLER. A TUMBLER AND SAYS THERE IS A CHANCE THIS IS VODKA. FRANKLY PRETTY FUNNY. BUT THERE IS A TRANCE IT'S VODKA BECAUSE I'M A MOTHER WITH CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 6 AND THERE IS ALWAYS THE CHANCE THIS COULD BE VODKA BUT I WANT TO BRING UP THE POINT OF THE FACT I'M CONCERNED ABOUT WOMEN'S HEALTH AND I FEEL THAT ESPECIALLY WHEN IT COMES TO WORKING MOMS AND MOMS TRYING TO SPRIT THE AND THAT'S WITH THE HELP OF OUR CHILDREN. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? IT COULD BE VODKA. WE HAVE THE BALANCING, I THINK. I THINK I WAS SO RELIGIOUS ABOUT MY CHILDREN HAVING THEIR EVERY 3 MONTH CHECK UP AND I WOULD HAVE SINUS INFECTION OR STREP THROAT AND DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO GET DOCTOR BUT I WAS CONSCIOUS HE TRYING TO IN GLECT OURSELVES AND WATCHING WHAT'D SHE DO AND CHOOS AND ARE YOU THINKING TAKING BETTER CARE OF YOURSELF? I JUST STARTED A NEW CATEGORY ON THE BLOB. THE 40s AND OVER AND I FEEL LIKE NOW I REALLY THINGS ARE CHANGING. BEFORE I COULD SKATE BURGER AND NOW YOU REALLY CAN. RIGHT NOW YOU CAN. AND IT IS FOR EVERYTHING. AND YOU HAVE THIS POINT AND TELL ME THERE IS HOPE ON THE OTHER END WELCOME BACK. I'M JOINED BY QUADRUPLETS AND THEIR MOTHER TERRI BELL AND NURSE KAREN WHO IS WITH MOTHERS MILK BANK OF FLORIDA. TODAY WE'RE HERE TO TALK ABOUT A BRAND NEW MILK BANK OPENING THAT MOTHERS HERE IN ORLANDO AND CENTRAL FLORIDA CAN GIVE OTHERS THAT NEED BREAST MILK. WHEN YOUR CHILDREN WERE BORN, QUADRUPLETS, OBVIOUSLY MOST PREMATURELY. ALL. WHY WAS IT IMPORTANT TO HAVE BREAST MILK? THEY'RE ALL PREMIES SO LESS THAN 2 POUNDS AND WE LEARNED FROM THE NICU THAT BREAST MILK IS LIFE SAVING AND WITH 4 THERE WAS NO WAY TO PRODUCE MILK FOR 4 BABIES AND THEY RECEIVED LIFEHEALING TRAIT. THIS IS THE FIRST AND IT'S THE MILK BANKS IN THE COUNTRY THAT PROVIDE MILK FOR THE LOW BIRTH WEIGHT BABIES AND WE HAVE A LOT HERE AND WE HAVE A MOM WHO IS SCREENED CAREFULLY BEFORE DONATING BREAST MILK AND THE MILK BANK CULTURES AND PASTEURIZES AND CULTURES AGAIN TO MAKE SURE IT'S PROTECTIVE AND IT HELPS THEM SURVIVE AND THEN HOE IS SHE BORN? AND HOW IMPORTANT IS BREAST MILK AS FAR AS HER RECOVERY AND GROWTH. IT WAS VERY IMPORTANT ON THE INFECTION AND WE CALL IT NEC. AND IN FLORIDA HUNDREDS OF BABIES GET NEC EVERY YEAR AND SO NEC IS SO SERIOUS THAT A BABY CAN DIE. OKAY, LET HER DOWN. ANYWAY, NEC IS SO SERIOUS THAT BABIES CAN DIE AND IF THEY DON'T THEN THEY NEED REALLY STRONG MEDICAL INTERVENTION AND SOMETIMES SURGERY AND THEN THEY HAVE HEALTH PROBLEMS THE REST OF THEIR LIFE. IS IT SAFE TO GIVE BREAST CANCER WITH MORE NEED. AND YOU HAD NO PROBLEM TAKING IT FROM THE BANK? ABSOLUTELY NOT. AND THERE ARE SO MANY RISKS TO GETTING FLORIDA AND IT'S GETTING THOSE WITH DIARRHEA, RESPIRATORY INFECTION AND THINKING MORE OBESITY AND EVEN CANCER AND DIABETES SOY AND THEN BH IT'S PROCESSED AT THE BANK. AND NO BANK AT FLORIDA.ORG. HOW DO YOU DO THIS RIGHT NOW? WHO IS ESCAPING RIGHT NOW. COME BACK FOR ONE LAST SHOT AND NOAH AND OLIVIA, HOW DO YOU DO THIS? WE HAVE A LOT OF GATES IN OUR HOUSE. PLEASE LEARN ABOUT FEEDING AND DONATING MOMMY'S BREAST MILK. THAT'S IT FOR OUR SPECIAL MOTHER'S DAY.

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