June 02, 2007

"Slugout in the Dugout" Sinks Cubs To New Low: Carlos Zambrano finally gave fans the meltdown they've been waiting for, slugging it out with Michael Barrett in the dugout and clubhouse Friday. Great way to spend your 26th birthday, Carlos; get shelled then embarrass the team a bit more (if that's possible).

I still have hope, I have been down that road before. A new low?? Maybe. The curse in all its glory?? Never been a believer in that. I love Carlos because of his emotions, misplaced emotions. The Lou meltdown should be fun to see. I bet he wishes he never put on the Cubbie blue. Kerry Woods could be just what the doctor ordered. Keep Hope Alive!! And never put out the torch, you may need it to keep your crack pipe lit.

"Zambo" thinks he's the original Bad Bob. He's played this bad ass role before, and nobody bought it them, either. The old man used to say, "Son, there a lot of bad MFs in Boot Hill". I agree with funeralguy, on the Lou. I just hope it's something original, and a spur of the moment thing. That "throw the hat, dirt on the plate, toss the base" crap is so 1950's. Lou, you've had PLENTY of time to think this out...make us ALL proud!!! A-Rod? What does BARREEEEEEE think of this stuff, stealing HIS fire? Oh, that's right, he's not talking...

I don't know why, but I always get a special thrill when I'm watching a baseball game and see everybody start hauling ass down the tunnel after two guys have words and disappear towards the clubhouse. There's that lull as guys peek down the tunnel with inquisitive looks on their faces, then realize the shit's hit the fan and they better get back there before somebody gets the crap beat out of 'em. Viva la beisbol!

Piniella should hire Kruk and Dykstra as bench coaches. Any foolishness breaks out, the three of 'em take care of it themselves, direct and personal. Right there in the dugout, where we can all see it. The clubhouse tunnel gets sealed until things are under control. Whup the miscreants and leave 'em in the game so the crowd can admire them. They don't get to see the trainer until the coaching staff says so. Plan B would be to keep a couple of those crazed Chicago ballyard fans right above the dugout to drop in like Spider Man and help lay down the law if needed. I guess at least one of them was a Sox fan, but no matter. They like coming out of the stands and rushing men in uniform. Ideally, they would be shirtless and well marinated. Pay 'em in cash per occurrence.

That "throw the hat, dirt on the plate, toss the base" crap is so 1950's. You may have some trouble finding someone from the 50's that would start to kick their hat at second base, and continue kicking it all the way to the dugout. I wish I could remember when game that was, I know it was Cleveland vs Seattle. Griffey jr just sat in that dugout covering his face with his own hat he was laughing so hard. Lou kicked that hat into the stands, and the next thing you knew it got dropped back into the dugout. I thought jr was going to fall over. Definately my funniest "Lou moment" that I ever saw.

The "grenade toss" is HOF stuff... That was classic. Did you see the part when he covered home plate with dirt and proceeded to draw out another home plate in the dirt like 2 feet to the right, signaling where the ump's strike zone was. It was hilarious. Now that's entertainment. BTW, why would Lou be suspended indefiantly when he accidentally made contact with the ump?