Kitten Mittons, you will be smitten! I just watched that crazy guy try to sell mittens to put on a cat’s paws??? This is another one of the many Internet pop culture tees featured on this site. I have to admit that if you’re not in the Internet meme world wouldn’t understand. I also have to admit that the Kitten Mittons commercial is about the dumbest pice of comedy I have seen in quite a long time. But it did make me laugh a little and I would probably go back for more from this wacky dude.

Columbia – SteamPunk Air-City | Paradise in the Skies

If you’re going to Columbia, the great steampunk air-city in the sky, then make sure to wear a steam-powered watch on your wrist. Also make sure you bring your gas-powered mask so you can breathe up there in the sky where there is not very much atmosphere. You may also want to bring your cool black boots with the silver eye-holes and crazy buckles. You can make your own gas mask with some tips from this page:

Another Internet cultural meme, inside joke, quirky t-shirt that has an association with a cat meme. Most of what I can find says, “I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!” and features a cute kitty that looks crazy. You can see it in the eyes of that little milk drinking, schizo feline. This is like when I tell people that I know that I am not paranoid, it is just that everyone’s out to get me. People are obviously not out to get me but it sure seems that way and I am so glad that, “when I am alone, I am together.”

This is absolutely true except for the part where you pick up Celiac disease or candida and lactose intolerance, and every time you eat a piece of pizza you get bloated, gassy, and often have diarrhea seven minutes after meal time. Then that faded love might not look half bad. But, before you body is overwhelmed with the wheat and cheese, there’s no doubt pizza is way better than love.

You see. The further North you are, the more better you are. At least that’s kind of what this shirt is hinting at. I don’t really believe that. My theory is the further north you are the colder you are. You say colder than a witches tit and I say colder than a well digger’s ass. We all have our own worldviews. Now, can we respect them. Buying this shirt would be a strong indicator that you have an open mind.

You see what they did here. Those are elements from the Periodic Table of Elements and they spell out OMG. Oxygen and Magnesium. OMG in Internet parlance stands for Oh My God. So, when chemistry gets overwhelming because you suck at science, this is the shirt you need to wear and the thing you need to say.

I feel like this dude should not be smiling. Yes, whatever the joke was it made him laugh hysterically, which makes you smile, but if, during those paroxysms of hilarity, your ass falls off, I think you’re no longer smiling. You’re in pain. I mean look at the chunk that fell off here. The ass goes pretty deep. That hurts. But, maybe the dude’s high.

LOTR fan? Then I know you like this one from Snorg Tees. Am I right? It’s a crucial concept in the story. Mordor is not a place for leisurely strolls. This helps set up a considerable amount of tension with the ring stuff and the good versus evil stuff…and that’s why you have a primal urge for this design.

You have a little mashup and wordplay going on right here. This is a creature from the Jim Henson movie, The Dark Crystal. And, of course, you have the song I’m Sexy and I Know It from LMAO. Now that you have the basics let me tell you where the real humor comes in. That bird is as ugly as sin. So, the implication that it is skekski is fall off you chair and roll on the floor laughing: FOYCROFL. I’ll right, maybe not that serious, but still.

All three of those words carry so much weight. They’re such strong words, which is probably why they’re used over audio communication to spell out letters, so there’s no confusion. You know “P” and “T” sound an awful lot a like over a crappy VoIP line, so being able to give the letters words to make certain the person on the other end understands is imperative.

Not sure where this Your Mom 74 People Like This T Shirt is going. Because we near Mother’s Day I choose to interpret it as your mom is popular and people like her, which is a very nice thing. However, if I think too hard, I might start to consider that the designer, Desperation UK, meant that maybe 74 people have carnal knowledge of your mom, which is sort of an unsavory thought. So, banish that from your mind, and think of the good interpretation.