The realisation that I couldn't just wander back into my working shoes after a maternity leave of 13 months.

How I was actually disposable and wasn't in as such high demand as I had once thought... My oh my how I came tumbling down off that pedestal I had placed myself upon.

Working life as I knew it was far behind me. Changed forever.

So you can imagine my surprise when I head into the office after a long weekend to find that I need to fill out an internal company profile. A profile similar to LinkedIn that can be viewed by the entire organisation worldwide.

A profile that wants me to share my hopes for the future, my aspirations for the next couple of years...

Of course I sat there stumped.

Stumped because I have so much that I want to achieve in the next two years. Stumped because I could never write it down on my internal work profile....Stumped because it would mean telling them that I want to leave. How I want to leave sooner rather than later.

I want to make big changes in my life and carve a career that I can be proud of.

I don't want to stay put in my 'comfortable rut' just because it is the easy option.

In the next 2 years I want to have resigned, gathered up enough work experience to re-write my entire CV, and I want to be in a new job pushing myself forward so that I can succeed. I want to have to have taken the chance on that fork in the road and see where that yellow brick road will carry me.

After all if I don't put myself out there now, I never will.

Success is not a destination, it's a journey and I am more than ready to grab life with both hands.