9/8/97 - Semblable to a Spark's E-mail.
So you want to e-mail Ben but you don't
have time? No problem! After reading
this .plan, you'll already know what
you'd get in response from Ben!
First of all, you'll notice the strange
e-mail address Ben is using to write to
you. His domain server allows for
unlimited e-mail aliasing, and Ben
cannot pass up the chance to exploit
something few others have. Often his
address will have some reference to
Anna, a trend which started after
London.
You don't know what London has to do
with Anna and Ben? Keep reading!
Then you'll see some PGP info. Ben
encrypts his e-mail for some reason.
No one's going to fake their e-mail
using Ben's name, but Ben uses it
anyway. Some suspect he just thinks
it's cool.
Ben will conventionally start off
by thanking you for complimenting
him or his site. He will then
apologize for not responding on
time. Without fail.
Ben will then begin to babble about
various things tangentially related
to what you were originally talking
about. He will digress into a rant
about how much people suck and about
why the Internet is so magnificent.
Sometimes Ben will even go so far
as expressing his frustration for
the people who never accepted him
in high school.
No matter what the situation, Ben
WILL find a way to link it back to
Anna. It comes full circle, as Ben's
roommate says. Do not try to avoid
this part of Ben's e-mail. It is
inevitable. You can talk to him
about growing mushrooms in a sand
compound and he will soon be talking
about Anna, his girlfriend. When
Ben is particularly enamored, he'll
tell you about his memories in
London, the first time he met Anna
in real life.
At this point, Ben will either a) get
sidetracked and switch windows for
an hour or two or b) get tired and
wrap up his e-mail in a boring fashion.
Again, Ben will apologize for responding
late and he might apologize for talking
about Anna so much to someone who isn't
interested in his love life.
Other optional sections: Bennish (c)
ribbing, if he knows you well enough.
Music lyrics to show off his taste in
music. An attached love poem he found
while skimming Norton's Anthology. Real
content, although that appears infrequently.
"All thoughts of a turtle are turtles,
and of a rabbit, rabbits."
-Emerson
I'm tired and low on ideas. Sorry I'm not
updating daily right now.
. . . c o m
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