If you didn't think it was worth it. If you didn't think there was a real chance. You wouldn't be here. Either that or you're a huge, terrible, abusive, sociopath. Since I don't believe the latter, I'll stick with the former...which...means...*sigh*... I'm still madly in love with you.

One part of the day I can be outgoing and all jokes and smiles.. And then, for no apparent reason, I stop smiling and talking and seem to leave this world.. But I'm still here. It's just that my mind wonders and I let it.

And just to be perfectly clear here. I want to make sure you understand. I didn't leave you. I am trying and almost finished getting the education that is going to free me. It was never that I didn't love you. It's that I have two other people that I love and am responsible for too. If you had cared you would have worked harder to help me.

DON’T ask me how I'm doing Don't ask if I’m okay Don't say they're in a better place, as you won't like what I say NO .. Time is not a healer and this was NOT Gods will, If He knew how much I’ve really lost, they would be right here still. I WON’T try to be positive And this wasn't for the best My hearts in broken pieces And it hurts deep in my chest. Don't say, at least they're out of pain Well I'm not, and MAY NEVER be. Their pain is gone, but mines still here It's been passed on to me…

I won't deny that we had arguments and I'm not perfect but I'll be fucking damned if I'm going to let you say I abused you mentally or emotionally . Look I love you and I'm still here after everything we have went through but it's because of our stubbornness and bad decisions we both made in the past and guess what we can fix it . I know what your thinking but ask yourself do you love me and if so try being real with the situation instead of passing blame on others to make yourself look…