Squiddy: Aren't you the hero? Jables: I don't know. Squiddy: Would you like to be? Jables: OK. Squiddy: Let's try this again. Hellllloooo, hero! Jables: Yo.

Jable's Adventure is a freeware platform game created by Jason Boyer (with help from Ryan Pietz on the dialogue and plot, and music by Kevin "Frantic Panda" Carville) and released in 2010. It's a Metroidvania game (it plays like a less-linear Cave Story) with a surreal, self-aware sense of humor.

You play as Jables, a 15-year-old boy who wakes up one morning to find a squid perched on his head. Its name is Squiddy, and he insists that Jables is the hero. So Jables sets off to go exploring and a-hero-ing.

In spite of the game's short length (Boyers estimates that it has 30-60 minutes of gameplay), it's surprisingly Troperiffic.

The Cuckoolander Was Right: The princess. Squiddy doesn't even mention the princess until the game is almost over—it comes across like he just made her up. Then King Squid, in spite of being a card-carrying villain, vehemently denies kidnapping her, further calling into question her involvement with the story. Then she shows up at the end of the game anyway.

Jables: If we've found a jet pack, then we're probably nearing the end of the game. Squiddy: Oh, I guess you're right. Jables: Yeah. Squiddy: On the bright side, you'll get to meet the princess soon. Jables: I didn't know there was a princess. Squiddy: Neither did I...

Jables: I had no idea there was a villain. Squiddy: I bet he's the one who kidnapped the princess. Jables: Let her go, King Squid! King Squid: I didn't kidnap any princess. Squiddy: Then where is she? King Squid: My plan doesn't involve the princess. Squiddy: Yet you kidnapped her anyway. Jables: That's evil. King Squid:...

Let's You and Him Fight: Neither of the first two bosses are evil. Lumber Jacques attacks because he thinks you're a walking tree. Rutherford Goldbeard attacks because he thinks you're a cattle rustler.

Loads and Loads of Loading: it's a low-resolution game that requires several seconds of loading whenever you enter a new area, on contemporary dual-core gigahertz machines.

Mission Control Is Off Its Meds: The creator's description of the game calls it "an adventure filled with ... useless advice..." and he's not kidding. Squiddy thinks Jables couldn't jump before meeting him; he tries to teach Jables how to break blocks with his mind; and some of his useful facts about fruit are complete nonsense.

Morton's Fork: Employed by Rutherford Goldbeard. First he thinks Jables is a cattle rustler, who therefore needs to die. When Jables convinces him he's not there for any cattle, Rutherford concludes Jables has been possessed by a brain squid—and Rutherford's brain-squid-removal procedure is no less lethal than his anti-cattle-rustler measures.

Offscreen Villainy: While King Squid claims to have a villainous scheme, no details are ever revealed. As far as we can tell, the scheme may have consisted of nothing more than declaring himself the villain and waiting for a hero to come fight him.

Schmuck Bait: The mermaid gives you useless things to make you go away, eventually culminating with, "Listen, if I tell you a secret, will you leave me alone? ... If you pester the mermaid too much, you're gonna have a bad time." If you talk to her again, she says "I warned you," and kills you instantly.

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