This Woman Pooped During Her Date and the Internet Is Going Wild

“I didn’t have a plan."

One girl’s worst-case scenario is going viral, in the best way possible. One Twitter use, who goes by Misunderstood Worm, captivated the world Monday night with an 18-tweet story about pooping at her date’s house, only to find that his toilet wouldn’t flush. Her solution to this nightmare of a problem? Wrap the single specimen in toilet paper and put in her bag until she heard her date flush on his own bathroom excursion and could safely deposit it.

Her unorthodox method worked, and her date never seemed to notice, though Misunderstood couldn’t stop thinking about it. You can read the whole thing on her Twitter (start here) if you’re looking for highly specific survivor’s manual.

So far, the tweets have racked up thousands of likes and retweets, with plenty of admirers, and very few requests for the questions I personally have, like, how did it not smell, why didn’t you just throw it out the window, why didn’t you pretend to have a phone call and take it outside immediately, HOW DID IT NOT SMELL, and also does your date know about this yet because I kind of feel like if you’re both fine with this whole situation just hang on tight and call it, you found each other, you’re done.

Of course, she’s not the first person to deal with a broken toilet and a working body. The beloved David Sedaris has the best advice on what to do with rogue poop in his story “Big Boy,” which you can and should read here, so Misunderstood is already in great company. We definitely encourage coming forward with any and all hilarious tales of body-based emergencies, but if you’d rather avoid all the drama, do yourself a favor and check every bathroom you enter for a plunger, soap, and proper toilet paper before you settle in. Your body functions! But sometimes the world doesn’t.