Turn It Down, Turn It Off.

What’s with the noise?
More specifically, what’s with all the bloody music?

As my range has
increased, so has my perambulations around this wonderful city I call home. I’ve
discovered new streets, beautiful buildings, little spots of quiet magic like
the Trinity Square labyrinth, and it’s all been completely wonderful.

Well, not entirely
completely. Because I have also discovered a noxious new trend. Music. Loud,
thumping, blaring, everywhere. I’m
used to it in stores, but haven’t before experienced stores piping it outside
as some sort of come-hither signal to the masses. All it makes me want to do is
run in the opposite direction.

I’m used to it in
restaurants — and usually always ask for it to be turned down (yes, I am that
person) — but on restaurant patios? If I’m sitting on the patio, I’d like to be
able to hear my dinner companion as we engage in that old-fashioned thing called
conversation, not yelling over the music. I’ve chosen a patio seat because I’d
like to be outside, in the beautiful summer air with its outside noise, not
deafened by whatever music the restaurant imagines that customers would like.
Hint: no music. That’s what I would like. Or, if you must play music, then background
music. And apparently I need to explain this phenomenon of background music. It
is, by definition, music that’s in the background, low enough that it can be
ignored, low enough that I can hear what my friend is saying, and low enough
that I can hear myself think.

I have a theory that
restaurants play loud music to keep the tables moving. Loud music discourages
diners from lingering, thus enabling you to get more arses in the seats per
night. I might reluctantly accept that, but on the patio? The point of patios
is to linger, not to move quickly, hoover down your food quickly and get the
hell out of there before the noise drives you crazy.

I haven’t noticed
music on patios before this year, nor had I noticed any patio-less restaurants
piping their inside music outside and apparently it’s as contagious as a stomach bug in a kindergarten. It’s barely July and already a lot of downtown patios
and patio-less restaurants have outdoor music. Again, dear restaurateur: this
is not enticing. Furthermore, if you’re on the ground floor of a residential building,
have some consideration for your upstairs neighbours, will you? Turn it down.

Better yet, turn it off!

But it doesn’t stop
there. Sunday, I headed down to Sugar Beach, eager to bliss out in the sun,
listening to the waves, the occasional screech of a seagull and the far-off
sounds of others enjoying the beach (far-off because I move down the promenade,
far enough away that I can’t really hear them). This is my bliss. This is
perfection. Sitting by the water in the middle of the city with hardly any city
noises, only lapping water and screeching gulls. An hour’s worth of this
wonderful place and I have peace in my soul.

There are two new
clubs in Toronto that are quite unique. They are so-called day clubs. With
pools. One in downtown East and the other in the West End. Yes, you heard that
right. A large club with pools that’s open during the day.

I don’t get it,
either.

Back to Sunday. What I’m
hearing is the not-so-dulcet tones of Cabana Pool Bar, located southeast of my
location. I looked up their website. It’s
open Tuesday-Sunday from noon to “late.” During which time, one presumes, they
will play loud music. Which, as they are an outside club, will be shared by
anyone in the immediate vicinity, as well as the not-so-immediate vicinity. How
they got a permit to do this is beyond my comprehension.

I put on my headphones
to listen to a book. Nope, even turned up high, I can still hear the thumping. And
it’s not because the music/insane noise is carried on the currents of a breeze
that’s conveniently coming from their direction, because the wind is actually
coming from the opposite direction.

This is not going to
be blissful. They have turned my sanctuary into hell.

And yes, I do know
that I’m starting to sound like the Grinch with the “noise, noise, noise, noise”
but when did all this happen? When did it become okay for establishments to
play music so loud that you can hear it from a block or more away? When did music
pollution become not just okay, but apparently desirable? When did silence
becomes so scary? When did it become necessary to drown out the sounds of
nature?

And when can I and all
the other people who’ve enjoyed sitting quietly by the lake at Sugar Beach get
our sanctuary back?

Comments

Some convenience stores here in California pipe music--classical!--outdoors to discourage youth loitering near the doors. It's sort of funny and it works! But I get your aggravation with thumping, pounding, LOUD music everywhere else. I hate not being able to hear my companions during a meal, and I really hate being forced to listen to music I dislike. It's an ugly addition to an already cacaphonous life.

I so agree - except that I've been noticing music pollution for years. Why do neighbours think you want to hear their music? I have to shut the doors and turn the air conditioning on and still I can hear the bass. I could rant on this one for a long time.