Tuesday, November 20, 2012

"Piglet noticed that even though he had a very small heart, it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude." ~ A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

1. Use a Gratitude Journal. Help your child focus on the positive by stating something good or something they are grateful for each day. They can write, draw, or scrapbook in their journal.

2. Play the Gratitude Game. Have each person take a turn stating something they are grateful for. A great game for the dinner table!

3. Send Gratitude Cards. Have your child make a "Gratitude Card" for a family member, friend, or someone who has helped them.

4. Teach your child to look a person in the eyes when they say thank you. Not only will their message be better received but they will observe the recipient's response of a smile or nod.

5.Work towards something. Today's kids - the "instant gratification generation" receive information and often things rather quickly. Have your child earn that toy or game they desire. By working towards something there is a greater appreciation for the item and the person who gave it.

6. Send thank you notes.

7. Volunteer together.Teaching your child to lend a helping hand to those in need increases their understanding of what it means to be grateful. It also increases Serotonin, the "feel good" hormone.

8. Be the example. Say thank you, make gratitude statements, and observe the positive with your child. Children who hear and observe adults express gratitude are more likely to identify gratitude themselves.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Almost a month after Hurricane Sandy, many on the East Coast are continuing to feel the effects. Relief efforts are in full swing and families are trying to piece their lives back together. As Thanksgiving is soon upon us, Sandy is a reminder of all that we have to be grateful for.

Here are a few things I learned from Sandy:

1.Sometimes
we need to surrender. In an attempt to feel somewhat in control before the
storm I cleaned. That’s right – I vacuumed, dusted, washed laundry, and even
washed the floors. Somewhere between folding towels and vacuuming I heard
myself saying the mantra I was taught and now end my yoga classes with. “Peace
to yourself, peace to others, and peace to those things we have no control
over.” I realized I was trying to feel in control of something much bigger than
myself. I gave up cleaning, surrendered, and sat down to focus on the moment –
safe at home with family.

2.I have attachments.
In the past decade social media has changed the way we live and it was
magnetized for me during the storm. Fortuitously my very outdated scratched
screen, flip phone’s time was up two weeks ago. Deciding to update myself, I
purchased an IPhone which allowed me to “stay connected” during the hurricane. I
was comforted by seeing friend’s posts knowing they were okay, received updates
from my newly downloaded Hurricane app, and texted family members for
assurance. Then when the power went out I needed to preserve my phone, so I put
it aside. When I did this I noticed something – I relaxed. On a typical day,
due to my work, my phone is constantly ringing, voicemails are left, and texts
and emails are received. Being away from my phone allowed me to observe my
attachment as a quiet stress inducer. I was reminded to put it aside more
often.

3.Quiet is
nice. When the lights were out and the heat off I had little to do but
snuggle under my blanket, read by candlelight, and listen to the radio gently
playing in the background. I imagined my ancestors years ago living this simply
and relaxed into it. I ate dinner by candlelight focusing on the meal instead
of TV in the background, telephone calls, or email notifications. My mind and
body felt relaxed devoid of all the regular stimulation – as if I had just left
a two hour yoga class. Lesson learned. I will unplug more often.

4.We need
to take better care of Mother Earth. She can be uncontrollable, relentless,
and sometimes even vicious but she’s also beautiful, healing, and a provider of
life. As I watched the trees blowing furiously in the wind I noticed the pine
trees in the back yard moving to and fro but not budging. I was lucky to keep most
of my trees. The next day as I inspected the damage I realized the trees were here
first. The recent weather patterns are speaking to us regarding climate change.
It is time for us to listen.

5.In times
of great despair and suffering people’s good nature shines. News reports
cast images of heroic men and women risking their well-being to help others who
could not help themselves. Neighbors came together to offer a hand and friends
offered their homes for comfort to those who were affected. Why do we wait for
tragedies to express this human part of us?

6.Humans
have a great capacity to overcome and heal. In his book, Everything Beautiful Began After, Simon
Van Booy writes, “After every chapter of devastation, there is a rebuilding; It
happens without thought. It happens even when there is no guarantee it won’t
happen again. Humans may come and go – but the thread of hope is like a rope we
pull ourselves up with. “

I am reminded we have the ability to overcome,
to trudge through the messes and puddles and hurts to grow stronger, rebuild,
and to heal. When we do this together, lifting one another up, the results are
more than what we started with.

7.Focus on
appreciation. We live in a fast paced society that is constantly thinking
ahead instead of appreciating the moments we are in – hello Christmas commercials
in October? I am grateful for the many blessings in my life, my friends and
family. Sandy was a reminder these blessings, not things, are what matter.

Today I wish you
to remember when to let go, use your supports, appreciate what you have, and
know you are stronger than you believe. To those affected by Hurricane Sandy
may the road to recovery be an easy one filled with love, support, and comfort
from others.

Friday, November 16, 2012

Traveling with kids, especially long drives during the summer season, can be an adventure. Here are some tips to help you travel with ease and enjoy the ride.

1.Give each child (mom and dad too) a throw away
camera, journal, and photo book. During your car ride and vacation they can use
their creativity and log their favorite moments.

2.Pack a survival car kit for you and your kids.
Essentials are extra headphones, batteries, Aspirin, Dramamine, Band-Aids, and
any necessary medications. Then pack the “Fun” items such as a new DVD (I do
not typically recommend watching DVDs in the car UNLESS it is a long car
trip), travel games, books, and special
snacks. These can be thrown out throughout the trip as extra “surprises.”

3.Use your “Fun” items for rewards. When everyone
is sharing and keeping hands and feet to themselves they earna travel game.

4.Spend time before the trip reserving CD’s from
the library so each child can make their own vacation play list or CD for the
trip.

5.For long trips try book on CD.

6.During travel breaks designate one child to be
the leader for post drive stretching. Take turns.

Don’t forget to make frequent stops and most
importantly enjoy the ride!

Monday, November 5, 2012

Has your child walked in the door from school looking withdrawn but unable to express their feelings? Did they have a terrible meltdown but cannot tell you why? Try using our tool, Greco's Feeling Faces, to help your child express their feelings and communicate effectively.

Show your child the chart and ask them to point to their feeling for today. If you are discussing an incident that happened earlier have your child think about their feeling in that moment and point to it. This strategy can create a starting point for conversation, have your child feel understood, and for you to understand your child.

When using Greco's Feeling Faces do not forget to validate your child's feelings. Also, discuss a plan for what to do when your child is experiencing the feeling.

Examples, "When you feel nervous take five deep breaths."
" If you are scared tell Mom or Dad."
"When you are angry because a friend called you a name in school tell the teacher."

Greco's Feeling Faces will be available soon for free download on our website. Check back soon!

About

Jamie Perillo is a licensed child and family therapist, speaker, parent educator,and founder of Inspired Families. She serves on the board of FAEN and as the Behavioral Specialist for Little Ivy Nursery School.
Jamie works with families in her private practice in Connecticut. She is dedicated to supporting and empowering families through her practice, Inspired Families, and workshops. She founded Inspired Families in order to inspire healthy, positive lifestyles and provide behavioral strategies, parenting techniques, and creative, fun engaging family activities.
As a Certified Yoga Instructor specializing in holistic yoga therapy Jamie uses her training to compliment traditional treatment modalities, provide stress management and overall empowerment. She has taught yoga workshops to pre-teens and teens for the YMCA’s Upward Bound Program, Strong Kids Campaign, and co-facilitated Sierra Bender's Boot Camp for Goddesses Teens at Omega Institute. Jamie has also taught college graduate students techniques on how to utilize yoga in schools.
Prior to her private practice Jamie served as an Intensive In-Home Therapist Village and supervised teams of Clinicians and Counselors.