Archive for March 2011

So, I haven’t had time to update this journal for a while as I have been busy with life – tutoring, the PhD and just life in general. All’s good, except I am still struggling on the research front, and trying to put in more effort. I am stilll trying to juggle tutoring with the PhD, which honestly the former does require a fair bit of effort as well.

At the same time, I have also shifted this journal to http://www.jasminezheng.com . Yeap, I’ve decided to get my own domain, and hoping to have more time to write about my views on economics related issues, and so on.

A friend, D, from my previous workplace is here for a whirlwind work trip. So, R (his intern) and I showed him around Canberra on Sunday afternoon. It was good fun, and I am really glad to be showing anyone from Singapore around Canberra.It will be good to have YW in ANU sometime in the later part of this year.

We covered a fair bit of ground just by walking around. We went around the City, around ANU, my office to take shelter from the rain, around the lake all the way to the National Museum, had dinner at Pancake Parlour, and chilled at Knightsbridge, which really is by far my favourite chill-out place in Canberra (apart from cafes). Yes, that was a lot of walking we did.

This song brings back memories of a very dark period in my life, sometime last year. Looking back on it, it’s funny. But, it certainly wasn’t funny at all when going through that period of time.

I am not one of those who goes about saying there isn’t anything they regret in life. It’s reality. There have been decisions I have made that I wish I never went ahead with. These are moments I do regret from time to time. Decisions like: the first job that I should never have taken up because it was really only in the second job that I felt that I was learning things that I want to and valued as an economist; being away from university for four years was far too long; the list goes on. Well, I am not saying that I am filled with regrets either.

I guess it’s the rain and lack of sleep that’s putting me in such a mood.

Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That’s alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, missundaztood
Miss “no way it’s all good”
It didn’t slow me down
Mistaken
Always second guessing
Underestimated
Look, I’m still around…

You’re so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you’ll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It’s enough
I’ve done all i can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you same

You’re fuckin’ perfect to me
The world stares while i swallow the fear
The only thing i should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and I tried tried
But we try too hard, it’s a waste of my time
Done looking for the critics, cuz they’re everywhere
They don’t like my genes, they don’t get my hair
Stringe ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?

My heart goes out to those in Japan. The country doesn’t really need the nuclear incidents after a major earthquake. Friends in Japan are safe, with one returning back to Singapore for the time being, given how he can’t help with anything that’s happening.