Bikini Body

As I was sitting in the pool yesterday I thought about swimsuits; yesterday was actually only the third time I’ve had my swimsuit on all summer. I typically spend the least amount of money I can on one, and don’t EVER try them on first, preferring to just stick with whatever black one-piece I find at Target (which is what I’m wearing. It’s pretty ill-fitting honestly).

I’m sure you’ve all heard the new response to magazine editorials on getting a “bikini body” for summer: put a bikini on your body. Or even better, I loved this one from the Cut: How to Get Your Body Caftan-Ready for Summer.

Now, I agree one million percent with the first statement; there is no “bikini body” – we all have bikini bodies, all you need is a body and a bikini. But you’ll forgive me if I don’t put THIS body in a bikini. I just wouldn’t feel comfortable in one. Too exposed.

I LIKE one-piece swimsuits, actually. I think they’re very chic and sophisticated. And sometimes, I don’t need to see everything on everyone, you know?

But it may be time for me to invest in a swimsuit that actually fits. And that I feel comfortable in. In that case, I should probably go for a skirted one, to hide my saddlebags, or at least a swim skirt + tankini top (I’ve heard good things about Land’s End for skirts).

What do you wear at the beach/pool? How do you buy your swimsuit?

More of my favorites:

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thanks for sharing 🙂

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Comments

I’m earning my dive master cert, so I’m out on diving & snorkel trips often, thus I see a lot of folks in various versions of swimwear (when they aren’t in a wetsuit). It’s funny how many women, even those in some seriously good ripped P90-esque form still find it necessary to randomly apologize for their current state of fitdom. Everyone has trouble getting inside a wetsuit whether you are a buff or a puff.

Even on regular snorkel trips, a lot of patrons just wear swimsuits & maybe a rashguard top & there seems to be a lot of women quickly glancing at other women who might be in younger or better shape & then the “glancer” begins to yank at her own swimsuit & shift uncomfortably as her insecurities bubble up to the surface. (Pun not intended, but it just fit). I hate to watch this happen as it begins to introduce doubt & unnecessary stress when the focus should be on enjoyable, fun, happy (& safe) diving or snorkeling.

There is always someone more pretty than you, thinner than you, richer than you, younger than you, more vivacious than you, more happy than you, more friendly than you, etc.

But there is always someone “uglier” than you, fatter than you, poorer than you, older than you, sadder than you, more socially-awkward than you, etc.

It can be hard to not want to gauge oneself against others as it seems we all tend to use some benchmark to measure just about everything, but to do that constantly is exhausting unless you always end up on the side that errs in your favor (good luck with that btw). I get the biggest kick when I meet folks who just enjoy the moment for what it is & if they are secretly gauging themselves against others – it doesn’t show in their unconscious actions, & they seem to walk away happy, healthy, having enjoyed their surroundings & life is good & that’s something to envy.

it makes me so sad that we do this, compare ourselves to others. i don’t care as much any more how i look, it’s more about how i feel. which is related, definitely, but mostly it’s about fit. i’ve just always treated swimsuits as something i NEED to have, but don’t want, so i don’t pay attention to getting one that actually fits. i know if i put some effort into it, i could find one that’s moderately flattering and comfortable to wear.

It’s hard to live in a warm climate like ours and not realize the need for the perfect swimsuit, even though it’s been several years since mine have seen water. Although I was trying not to shop this summer except for a few key, pre-identified items, a decent swimsuit I could wear to my 14-year-old niece’s birthday party was on that short shopping list. I am tall and bottom-heavy (sz 8/10 top, 10/12 bottom) and mid-50’s, so finding a one=piece that is long enough is like hunting for unicorns. Hence the Great Swimsuit Saga of 2015:

I liked the idea of a tankini, since the length wouldn’t matter so much. Since I rarely need swimwear, I started at Target for price and selection. Bolstered by one margarita too many, I hit the fitting room and immediately became trapped in what I thought was a tankini top; actually it was a one piece with a longer front that obscured the crotch. I nearly had to call a friend who lives near the store to rescue me, but realized how hard it would be to say “I’m a little bit drunk and stuck in a swimsuit at the Target a block from your house.” Finally managed to get myself out of it, and proceeded to try on every combination of top/bottom available, with no luck. Quality was about what you would expect; sure wouldn’t be getting multiple summers out of these, but they had some cute styles, just not cute on ME.

Then I hit the major departments stores – no luck. Finally I turned to Venus.com, an on-line source I used several years ago and luckily, by this time in the summer, suits were already on sale. You might check out their selection and current end-of-season pricing. I bought the Caress one-piece in both solid black and the black/blue combination; still deciding if I can justify keeping both. I could wear the 10 but got the length I needed in a 12. Fabric and construction are equivalent to those in much more expensive suits I tried on at Dillard’s, Macy’s, etc. I also bought a structured, underwire bikini top and fairly covered up bottom in solid black, just in case my imaginary boyfriend comes along and wants to take me to some secluded place where I wouldn’t mind getting some sun on my tummy. True to my shopaholic tendencies, I now have three suits, but they all fit and could be worn anywhere. I am wearing the bikini top with running shorts to mow my yard, much to the delight of the old guys on my block.

I also bought some tankini tops and bottoms through Lands End earlier in the summer. Quality is great but their fit is a little “off” for me, and they are very pricey. Their suits seem sort of “old lady” to me, even though I guess technically I AM an old lady. Another source that might be more your style is Athleta. You can find them on-line and they also have some brick&mortar stores now in our area – Preston Oaks or Turtle Creek Village would probably be the closest to you.

In the end, I missed my niece’s bday party because I still didn’t have a suit at that point. Now I wish I had gone in a sports bra, old bikini bottom and running shorts. How much longer will she think I’m cool enough to come to her parties??? Writing this entire swimsuit saga has been cathartic, and made me remember your post about things that are not perfect, but just good enough. Hope you find something that makes you feel good; I know you’ll look good, no matter what you think!

honestly, i just want to find a swimsuit i FEEL comfortable in. the one i have now is so big up top and weird on the bottom i’m always fidgeting with it. and i would like to contain my saddlebags, just a little bit. i always feel better just a little contained…even at the pool!

I swear by rash guards and surf leggings.. I’m protected from the sun, comfortable, and not self conscious at all. I favor long-sleeved rash guards and full-length leggings, but there are tons of options now. I usually purchase mine from Nordstrom and Jcrew, but even Forever 21 is selling them now (and surprisingly the Forever 21 leggings were generously sized).

Never heard of surf leggings, but I need to check them out! Can one wear them when not in the surf? Like a regular pool? I always said if I could just wear black spandex running capris to the pool, I’d be fine. : ) My “problem area” as my daughter so aptly described it recently, is my thighs, and it seems like the suits meant to camouflage them just make it worse. I seem to look better in a bottom that is higher cut on the outer thigh, but still feel like my thighs need their own ZIP code! Someone in my running group recently gave me the wonderful advice to think about all my thighs can DO, rather than how they look. By those standards, these are the thighs that have carried me through a half marathon, helped me push an entire human into the world, and rode a bicycle for an hour in 100+ temps this weekend. But I STILL hate them!

Yes, surf leggings basically look and feel like regular gym leggings, except they’re designed to get wet and have UPF. Many are now advertised as going from gym, to pool, to ocean and back. I find that I just need to wear bikini bottoms underneath them, just as I wear a supportive top under my rash guard. (Lesson learned- do not try to wear a one piece swimsuit under a rash guard and surf leggings – bathroom nightmare!)

TAM i heard that before too – and started to try and look at my legs differently from that point forward. honestly, and i’ve told the story before, going to the anne frank house in amsterdam really changed the way i see my legs – beyond all the emotions that well up from being in that house, i could use my legs to get me up and down the narrow staircase with ease. and they’re great for walking long distances around cities. you know. so i started to appreciate them more, and remember that every time i start to get hard on myself. if my legs weren’t so thick and sturdy, they might not be able to carry me around like i’m used to 🙂

we could never get together then in person. too much thigh for dallas LOL 😉

I agree it is so important to remember what our bodies do for us every day! 🙂 A funny anecdote about having thick legs: My sweet grandma is the kind who would always say we are too skinny and need to “EAT MORE!” especially back when she was the one doing all the cooking. Now, the too skinny part could have been said truthfully to both my siblings, but I have always fallen firmly in the category of “average with slightly chubby legs.” A couple years ago my grandma made a halfhearted comment about me being too skinny and me and my mom laughed and said no, definitely not. My mom then says something about my legs being big. Grandma looks me up and down then concedes (this is a rough translation) “Hmm, legs are a little thick. But that just means you stand sturdier.” ;-P I love my grandma.

I love Lands End – I get them on clearance (they’re always having a sale! And often they show up on Sierra Trading Post as well – and then you wait for their 40% off coupon….)

I buy separates – I need supportive tops – tankinis with underwires or bra size tops. I can get those online as well (bought a bunch at swimoutlet.com before my 40th birthday sailing trip) And then I just buy black swim shorts (walmart, target or lands end) to mix & match with the tops. I find that shorts are more flattering on me than a skirt. Or they look the same but the shorts are my preference 😉

And for swimming laps, the swim lessons & aqua aerobics I also did before my 40th birthday trip – speedos from Costco 😉

I practically LIVE at the beach in the summer since we moved near the ocean. (Don’t worry, sunscreen and an umbrella are my best friends!) I find that I require a long torso suit. I once ordered a strapless suit that only rose to my “under-boobage.” I had a good long laugh over that one. J Crew and Land’s End are my go-to’s. Land’s End wins for longevity and fit, tho.

Eh, I have saddlebags. They’re not going to go away unless I spend lots of money on liposuction. I used to feel more self-conscious about them as a teen or young adult, but apparently not self-conscious enough to have the surgery.

I have been wearing a Tyr reversible suit for … years, I guess. I love it, because it plays up my strong back and shoulders and smaller waist. I can swim in it fearlessly. I never have to tug it up or down. It’s timeless.

Twenty years of not worrying about swimsuit shape — it’s awesome. A++, would recommend to anyone.

thanks for the recommendation – i know mine aren’t going anywhere, either, and i don’t want surgery. they’re just frustrating… and i feel like they’re relatively uncommon, or at least I don’t see many women in person who seem to have them like i have them. of course, i’m also probably exaggerating my saddlebag “issue”.

I won’t lie: I have a friend who got the lipo and was like, “This cleared a lot of mental real estate,” and for that reason alone, I have not entirely ruled it out.

FWIW, the only time I “notice” them in your photos is when you point them out! Because otherwise, you’re dressing (or posing) like someone who’s pointing out her lovely toned torso and small waist, and that’s what my eyes go to.

i’m not averse to surgery, necessarily, just scared of it ! like, i know that’s the only way to NOT have saddlebags at this point. i can loose 25 more pounds, definitely, but they’ll still be there, just maybe a little smaller…

Some of the one-piece swimsuits are really nice–I like the teal one and that black sweetheart La Blanca. But from another lady who is one or two sizes smaller on top than bottom, you may find that it is much easier to find a two-piece that fits you properly. All the one-pieces I tried were either too tight on bottom or too huge on top due to my proportions. 🙁 And you don’t have this problem, but I have a bit of a pooch these days, and a one-piece did nothing but accentuate that (even the ones that claimed to have tummy control) whereas it is not so noticeable in a bikini, oddly.

Short of accepting your saddlebags, which I know is hard, have you considered looking for cute board shorts to pair with a swimsuit? I bought a pair from Athleta last year, and I can wear them for hiking and other outdoor activity so they are very versatile. The material would dry very quickly. I think they’re called the Costa short. 🙂

i don’t like shorts either, because they accentuate my heavy thighs/knees – tried that! i have issues from the waist down LOL!!! i do wear lululemon running skirts for walking dagny in the mornings and i love those – the shorter length helps slim my legs i think, and hide my saddlebags, so i’d like to try a skirt, like this one by gottex, which i think would do the same thing.

definitely agree that it would be much easier to find a two piece to fit correctly. since i’ve never found a one piece that fit very well i might as well try!! i just want to be comfortable. and not see my saddlebags … but mostly just comfortable!! i’m working on accepting them, and i’m doing much better than i have in the past, definitely!

I own exactly…zero..pairs of shorts. I HATE shorts with a passion on me. I much prefer a skirt to shorts. I remember shorts being more uncomfy than not & annoying as well.

What really got me shorts averse, was years (decades actually) ago it seemed there were women everywhere walking around…wearing shorts…and reaching up at their crotch & yanking out their shorts. Some even got fancy with a little side leg kick going.

That did not seem like something I wanted to find myself doing in public, so I stopped wearing shorts & haven’t missed ’em in the least.

ha! i don’t own shorts either, well, besides a denim pair that’s a cut-off from my very oldest pair of Goldsign jeans… what i do LOVE are the “running” skirts from lululemon. i have two pairs and wear them CONSTANTLY to walk dagny. so comfortable, and cool and the newest pair has tons of pockets for random stuff (and treats to tempt her from swallowing road kill)

I wear dresses pretty much ALL the time in the summer (work & casual). But for certain things I prefer shorts. HIking, swimming. I’m not sure why I have split preferences like that. Things like chafing while hiking is part of the issue, but not all, I’m sure.

Just wanted to recommend J.Crew. Quality, quality, quality. I just passed down some bikinis I have had for almost 13 years to a friend’s daughter and they still are in amazing condition (was finally ready to part with them after reading your earlier post that noted why do i have more than one bathing suit). Colors are classic, fit is comfortable, many coverage options. Every time I stray – victoria’s secret, old navy, etc- I am disappointed. Price is reasonable, especially if you can catch a sale.

I 2nd JCrew swimwear. Certain colors fade more quickly in chlorinated pools (but really, Cl gets everything eventually), but as far as holding up to saltwater – pretty good actually. Even the black ones. As far as durability, I’ve never had a JCrew swimsuit fail me at the seams or cause any wardrobe malfunctions.

I had a co-worker pony up for a suit from Malia Mills years ago. She spent a pretty penny on a 2-piece suit & while the quality was great, she looked really frumpy in it (from what she told us, as I never had a reason or need to see any of my co-workers in a bathing suit thankfully). But, that was years ago & they very well could have added more styles & less “old lady-ish” cuts.

I almost hate to suggest this – but have you ever checked out Malia Mills? Best swimsuits ever BUT uber-pricey and never on sale except occasionally final sale. (And you would have to be crazy to buy a swim suit final sale.). Still, her swimsuits are amazing, and, for me, worth every penny for how they make me feel – 100% body positive-ness!

I live in swim suits in the summer and totally subscribe to “put your body in a bikini.” I like one pieces too – but I have a super long torso and usually two pieces just fit me better. As to the swim dress or swim skirt issue – ugh, no. Unless you are 80 years old. Rarely do they do anyone any favors. Be proud of your body! Who the hell cares if you have saddle bags? Or a tummy? Or saggy boobs? Or whatever?

ACK! why did you make me look!! i’ve heard of mailia mills before, and have looked in the past, but obviously, am loathe to spend so much on a swimsuit! but OMG, i love these shorts. but OMG, the price!!! and i love this top. but MAN!!

when/if we go to hawaii, or some other beach vacation, then i will definitely consider these. love that they’re made in the US (hard to find!) also. but yeah, they’re beautiful suits, and love all the bodies featured.

i agree with you generally on skirted suits, etc., but…but…not even this one is okay? 🙂

As I was reading the comments I was thinking… Malia Mills! Her suits are expensive, yes. But I’ve been wearing her suits year in and year out and I always feel amazing in them. Check out the sale page. I’ve gotten all of mine marked down, and dollar cost averaged…. they’re worth the dollars spent! XMartha Merrill´s last blog post ..Awesome Graphic Tees for Men

I’m pro board shorts (longer ones), skirt bottoms, and loving the swim leggings that I just recently discoverd. I am pasty and I hate sunscreen so I am instantly drawn to a swim legging but I also think I would feel weird in them unless I was actually surfing or something.

I would love a one piece, as I think they can look great too, but frankly can’t find anyway with enough coverage on the bottom unless they’re skirted. I love a swim skirt but prefer it as a separate. Anything else would require a bit more shaving or exposure than I am comfortable with….

When I was younger, I was all about the bikini. Now that I’m older and pregnant, it’s all about functionality. I have a simple black one-piece that fits and that doesn’t cause me to tug, pull, or worry about showing too much. When you’re trying to wrangle a toddler, that’s a must. This summer is when I had my AHa! moment. Swimwear isn’t about going to the pool, looking a certain way, or impressing anyone. It’s about finding something that makes you comfortable and allows you to enjoy yourself. And shouldn’t all clothing do that for us? It may sound so simple, but I guess I was just so hung up on the aesthetics before, rather than the function.

absolutely agree. i just want to be comfortable at the pool/beach. the swimsuit i have now is much too big up top, and hence, slightly too revealing, and a little saggy in the ass, honestly. so i’m always messing with it. And for me, feeling comfortable and looking “good” are very much tied together though, so i usually try to find a good balance, something i’ve never attempted in a swimsuit! i just have never cared about it only buying something to cover my body so i could go to the pool/beach.

I am all about the high waisted bottoms and structured bikini tops. I <3 Lands End and Jcrew suits. Esp. because I am DDD on top right now. I am pretty body confident even post baby at size 10 so I always wear a bikini. The only thing I have started to do nearing 40 is embrace rash guards. My baby and adopted daughter wear them, I should probably too for sun protection. I did notice at the public Pool yesterday that most moms were wearing 2 pieces and most were my size or bigger, so maybe we are on our way to less body consciousness. When we and my husband, pre kids, went to Australia 2 years ago people were mostly middle sized (I feel like in the US, women are smaller than 6, bigger than 12) and people just wore whatever but ALWAYS sun protection. The culture there is very much beach centric but also active as people are much more into sport. Since then I just love that idea. Be active, stop obsessing over body. Also, I just completely reject the idea that I should dress to "hide" a body part. Who decided that body part was taboo? Part of a love for fashion as art means that you buck convention and so some weird rule about slim thighs or flat stomach seems stupid TBH. Love your blog! Totally trying to do conscious shopping right now.

i totally want to try some high-waisted bottoms and a nice halter top! i’ve found some i’m thinking about ordering…

see, i also reject the idea that “we” should dress to hide body parts, or always wear what’s “flattering”, what makes us look taller, thinner, or whatever. but sometimes, i WANT to hide a body part. or look taller, slimmer, whatever. and that’s also my prerogative. as it is anyone’s. i would never ever tell anyone she should dress a certain way to hide or enhance any feature, but if she wants to, who am i to say she shouldn’t? if it makes her feel better about herself to look a certain way, then more power to her. i find it sad that anyone would feel that way, hell, that it’s sad that i feel that way sometimes, but that’s reality at the moment, so given that, whatever we/she has to do to get out there and feel good about ourselves, then…

hell. i don’t even dress myself in the most flattering way possible, ask any of my haters LOL – i’ve never tried to tell anyone else how they should dress, or what to wear for her body type, which essentially is saying “this is how you should dress to enhance your ‘good’ parts and hide your ‘bad’ parts” – there are no good or bad parts 😉

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