Let’s Just Keep Shitting On Black People And Women

I woke up this morning to a bit of a tizzy on the internet. This is not to say that today was out of the ordinary, but it got me thinking…

Wait, can my posts be pink? I only write in pink. No? How about the headers? Links? SOMETHING? Thanks. [We’ll look into it. -Ed.]

Maureen Dowd, resident firecrotch (I mean that in the nicest way possible, really) at the New York Times, apparently started some sort of shitshow. Dowd’s article, Duel Of Historical Guilts, contains some stuff about shoulder pads and feminism as if the two are related in some way other than that they are both outdated trends from the late ‘80s and early ‘90s. And that’s just where she begins!

M.D. Firecrotch also pulls random quotes from random people. The first nonsensical quote comes from a white woman, quoting her black male friend saying something about slavery (naturally), and how that (naturally) meant he was voting for Barack. The woman’s comeback to her formerly enslaved friend was something similarly stupid about women, slavery, and menstrual cycles, and how that (naturally) drove her to vote for Hillary. Firecrotch then closes the entire article with this: “‘We love you, Bill!’ yelled one boy. ‘You did a good job, except for Monica.'” I’m not even going try to figure out why that quote was thrown in there, but Monica was totally a bad call.

Here’s the part that created the frenzy and got me thinking:

With Obama saying the hour is upon us to elect a black man and Hillary saying the hour is upon us to elect a woman, the Democratic primary has become the ultimate nightmare of liberal identity politics. All the victimizations go tripping over each other and colliding, a competition of historical guilts.

People will have to choose which of America’s sins are greater, and which stain will have to be removed first. Is misogyny worse than racism, or is racism worse than misogyny?

As it turns out, making history is actually a way of being imprisoned by history. It’s all about the past. Will America’s racial past be expunged or America’s sexist past be expunged?

I’ll save you all the time and pain of actually plopping yourself in the middle of the shitshow that ensued from this piece by summarizing key arguments. Nevermind, that’s too much work since each argument seemed to end up in the same place anyway. No matter how hard each “blogger” tried to explain that race and gender have no place in politics because it’s the “issues” that matter, each argument inevitably ended up being a pseudo justification as to why Hillary should win because “women have come so far” or why Barack should win because “blacks have come so far.” Don’t forget though, this election isn’t about race and/or gender, and only the issues have led to their decision.

I’ll be blunt: this election is about race and gender. Nobody wants to admit it, but it’s true. You can fight me all you want on this, but we all know that race and gender definitely play a factor in this election. Plus, if you and I got into a fight, I’d probably win. Anyway, for the first time, we have a woman and a black man who actually have a shot at becoming the leader of this great nation. You can’t say that something this significant, a 180° from something that has been the same since George Washington was elected in 1789, can just happen and not have any impact on people’s choices. Well you can, but you’re wrong.

Among the slightly more eloquent, Dowd’s last question about expunging past wrongdoings garnered a resounding “neither.” I agree with people like Johnny Firecloud (Firecrotch? Close enough…) who responded to that question this morning by saying, “neither, ever. stupid question.” You’re right; the past will never be expunged. What I don’t agree with is him, like many others, getting so “irritated” over such a “stupid” question. Maybe this irritation stems from Mr. Firecloud knowing that deep down there’s something bigger hiding in the fact that someone still feels the need to ask such a stupid question, but maybe he is too irritated to try to figure it out like the rest of this country.

Regardless of the point Firecloud was actually trying to make, he got me thinking about my own: No matter who is elected out of the three remaining contenders, that choice will have undeniable implications. If Obama secures the nomination, it’ll be the stain of misogyny that prevails by being able to keep another woman down; if Hillary is the nominee, the stain of racism will prevail by keeping the white tradition. It will likely start a discussion about why a white woman is given that opportunity before a black man, or vice versa. Sound familiar? Yeah, we had this discussion when one of these two groups was given the right to vote before the other, but that’s obviously for a whole different episode of Oprah.

McCain should just be crowned president now; at least that way, the quarreling will cease and the white man can put everyone back in their respective places.

Britney Bernstein loves the internet, pop culture, and politics. Britney also loves her Momma, Jesus, and America, too. If Britney didn’t have a full-time job saving the world for peanuts, she’d probably spend a lot more time mooching off Paris Hilton. Britney enjoys stalking people on MySpace and Facebook as well as reading away messages on AIM. When Britney isn’t saving the world or Googling you, she is probably hanging out with her amazing Australian Shepherd, Killer Bernstein.

15 Comments

The democrats are cute how they want to gutcheck the entire country in an epic bros vs hoes duel. The funny thing is, the answer is “old white haired dude”.

The same way its been for 52 presidents before now.

Let’s be honest, these candidates are longshots and truth be told, the democrats are at their best when they are the perennial poor-me, everything is unfair, you know you really should recycle more—any of you guys smoke pot?- underdogs.

Since you have prob spent time in DC as a lobbyist, you know that politics are a business in DC as much as gambling is a business in Las Vegas. Democrats have done pretty well ($) over the years promising the plebes all kinds of pipe dreams that they never deliver on (hint, delivery=less inventory to sell).

I’m convinced this is their plan and its business as usual. Either way, I can pretend to care about identity politics, race, universal health care and every other feel-good issue the Dems have domain over— but I still don’t think that my tax dollars can really help problems like that. So: i’d rather just keep more of my money.

I hope Obama or Hillary don’t quit their congress jobs because, you know, that shit is embarrassing when the whole presidency thang dont pan out.

(note: don’t the impeach bush twits know that impeachment takes longer than he has left in his term? in case you guys know any twits like this please answer in the space below. Thank you please [this phrase was ripped off from a refused song.])

“Maybe this irritation stems from Mr. Firecloud knowing that deep down there’s something bigger hiding in the fact that someone still feels the need to ask such a stupid question, but maybe he is too irritated to try to figure it out like the rest of this country.”

Silly rabbit – there’s nothing “hiding” in the fact that we haven’t come far enough out of the dark as a nation for me to believe that the symbolic nature of one person’s achievements can greatly impact the racial or misogynistic undertones of a country that has only recently become as balanced as it is, however remotely and inconsistently it may be.

No president is really going to have that much of an impact on that, regardless of pigment or genitalia. Sure, legions of books, magazines and TV networks will hail the amazing, history-making achievements of [insert candidate here], opening doors for [insert sociopolitically oppressed group here] across the nation. Millions will be made. But who’s really buying it?

All I know is that the road McCain’s waving us down does about as much for both causes as Bush did for the environment.

Nice to meet you Britney.
I wanted to read this article, but just as my brain got around the fact that you’re cool with being introduced as “super hot” right before your article that is presumably about black people and WOMEN deserving more respect and proper treatment, well… I just didn’t feel right about it.

Mr. Rose, I feel the need to respond to you first since you’re cool and I like you. The reason I’m cool with being introduced as “super hot” is because I am.
You say something about my article “presumably” being about black people and women deserving something they aren’t getting – it’s not, but better luck next time.

Note to all: read (or learn how to) before you comment on my posts. kthx.

Mr. Firecloud, you next. Oh wait, you must be a hippie. When I saw that “environment” was the last word in your comment, I had to laugh. This issue kind of isn’t about Bush, or the environment. I know you were just making a point (or something) but go to the Sierra Club website where people will be sympathetic to that stuff.
The rest of your comment misses my point. Ultimately, my point is that race and gender do play a part in this election – not that it shouldn’t or that the issue will be wiped away by some black dude or some chick.

Misanthropy, I have spent some time lobbying in DC as well as in Sacramento. Vegas just has a lot more whores than DC, but money is thrown around just the same. I’m not sure what I think about this being a “plan” by the democrats, but you’re definitely right about your tax dollars not being able to solve problems like racial/gender conflicts.
P.S. Don’t listen to Refused. That’s the devil’s music.

also, for the record, ‘super hot’ was added at her request (though i can vouch for its validity), and i’m kinda amazed that that has caused more controversy thus far than suggesting that ‘the white man’ should put ‘everyone back in their respective places.’

oh and also… dennis (of refused) is not saying ‘thank you please’ at the end of new noise. he’s saying ‘take your place.’

The issue of race and gender play less of a role than some might have us believe. Sure, it’s interesting and mildly entertaining that Oprah’s legions are divided by the fact that she’s supporting a black man instead of a woman in the presidential race, but in the end their arguments are fucking ridiculous. It’s akin to rooting for a sports team because you like their uniforms. That’s right, I said ‘akin to’.

I have family members that are, sadly, some of the more racist people I’ve encountered in life – but surprisingly even to me, the majority of them are ready to vote for him in November. Hell, maybe they just hate women more…
haha…

That, Mr. Firecloud, is because what is actually the most dangerous thing isn’t outright misogyny, but the general sexist undertones that exist everywhere. These days sexism has become less “Let’s keep the women stupid, pregnant and in the kitchen” and more “Heck….we can’t let a woman be president! The country will fall apart once a month when she gets her period!” A sentiment that Hillary did little to dispel when she almost cried (twice) on the campaign trail.

Whether you hate Hillary because she’s a woman, or Barack because he’s black, or you just hate them both because they’re Democrats….it doesn’t matter. It’s six of one, half dozen of the other.

In a time when countries like Nicaragua, Haiti and the Philippines have ALL had women leaders, we are behind the times. And the fact that all of this is such a “hot button” issue is frankly, a little sad.

I wonder why, when Sen. Joseph Leiberman was the VP Democratic candidate on the ticket with Gore in 2000 and again when he attempted to run for Pres. in ’04, religion wasn’t even close to being as big an issue as either sex or race has become in this campaign. Especially when anti-semitism is arguably older and deeper than either racism or misogyny. But the answer to that i’m told, is that “even Jews hate Jews”.

Ms. Freeman – Hillary makes for the perfect DentyneIce rep., except – minus the gum and twice the ice. Had she not dropped a scorching-hot tear or two, her supporters might have started to wonder why a well-intentioned victim like her is such cold hard bitch. Obviously the act was premeditated. I honestly wonder whether she even has periods, considering that she’s almost always been the first to pull her cock out and piss on her opponents.

I personally think that people need to get the fuck over this race issue. Nobody calls up to the Lord and says, ” Lord – make me white or black!” Nobody. I am a black female and have some black friends who are not voting for Barack. so all those that are saying that all black people are voting for Barack is just stupid. Look at what the nominee can do for you and your country, don’t look at their race. I have plently of wonderful white friends and it’s fucked up to hear that some white people have apparently not gotten the memo. Well let me let it be known. Cut the bullshit with race enough is enough. Just like black people to drugs and are lazy, so are white people and all other races.