Thursday, November 10, 2011

But the ghost of you follows me, i try to move on and let the pain fade but its as if the scar is open and fresh still bleeding fear. i try to live, but you remind me of all the reasons id rather die. i try to be happy and the memory of you brings anger. the pain and memories may never go away but my life is no longer yours.....that i will never forget.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Its been a while since I've been here, i had lost my fear for a moment and felt safe until the demon from my past showed up in my present. At 25 I went back into the head of the 12 year old that was so scared to shower in fear it would happen again. My abuser has taken another victim very close to me and i cant help but to feel the guilt, if i only spoke louder if only someone would have listened to me if only i could have stopped the monster. I thought I had let this go and forgiven him for my pain but how do you forgive someone who takes your childhood away who shows you that there is monsters in your closet. This is my take back I'm taking back my LIFE an even my childhood you tried to take! I will not give it to you and i will not let you take anyone else! If this post does nothing more please i beg you if you are being sexually abused tell someone! If they don't believe you tell someone else until you find someone who will, don't wait, don't be silent......I was I didn't try hard enough to make anyone listen and my abuser took another victim.