How stupid can a closing ceremony be?

All these days, I’ve been watching closing ceremonies which have been fairly underwhelming, but are quite efficient…

However, the IPL closing ceremony is just a great example of the fact that you could just lock up your brains in India and plan the closing ceremony!

How else could you explain the camera shooting, which was horrible, to say the least? The people who were switching camera angles must have been suffering fits! The idiot was changing angles every 2 seconds and it got so annoying to an extent that my cousin had to shout at me to stop mumbling about it!

Another bone of contention was the performance by Akon.

Now don’t get me wrong, Akon’s songs are great (though I haven’t got the opportunity to listen to most of them), and I have no grudge against him, but how do you explain the fact that the song “Smack that” blaring on the speakers but Akon was just strolling on the stage?

Lip-syncing is perfectly OK, but the guy should know that he should be lip-syncing!

The whole “Bollywood-SA”, or whatever that nonsense was called, was also a big farce. Frankly, I always looked forward to the strategic break so that I could see some nice-looking girls, but to actually make it out to be like some Miss World contest is just plain stupid!

To cap off this post, I would like to make special mention of Lalit ‘Monkey’ Modi! (no, no, not in the racial sense, don’t haul me before a court as I only have $5 to pay as legal fees!).

The IPL, as far as my understanding is concerned, is a sporting event. Since when it became a personal gratification even for Monkey is unfathomable.

Correct me if I am wrong, but this is an excerpt of what he said that day..

..I’d like to thank my wife and my children, x, y and z for their immense support…

Can you imagine what Mrs. Monkey would’ve said when he said that he was shifting out of India?

Darling, why don’t you shift the IPL to South Africa? I’ve already been to England, and I think SA would be a great place for shopping…

The children would’ve said something along these lines…

…Daddy, I like Mr. Nel because he makes monkey faces like you, please move the IPL to SA so that I can meet him…

Poor little chap, unaware that Nel is doing his circus tricks in London…

Do you hate it when those balls come into you? Do you hate the sight of tall bastards running in and propelling it into your crotch? If yes, then this is the sanctum for you (for you southpaws, SCRAM!)