This is 6-foot-2, 258-pound five-star defensive end Solomon Thomas out of Coppell (Texas) High School. If you cannot tell by his hilarious props, Thomas commemorated #SigningDay (hashtag Fax Joke Day) by announcing his commitment to the Stanford Cardinal via miniature tree. Also, a pair of Revenge Of The Nerds-style glasses with tape over the nose. Precious. Enjoy the school Jessie Spano wanted to go to most, Solomon!

His other top choices were UCLA and Arkansas, so let’s be thankful he didn’t pull a shrieking pig from under that table.