Surprise: It’s Another Terrifying Recording of Mel Gibson!

It’s been nearly two years since we were graced with all those recordings that let us in on the private life of Mel Gibson, but I know we all remember it like it was yesterday. It’s not every day that you hear Mel Gibson violently screaming at someone to blow him (or at least it wasn’t until that fateful summer of 2010). The memories of Mel’s terrifying rants will surely stick with us for a long, long time.

And probably even longer now that we’re still hearing them.

Ok, we have to catch up a little bit. This story has been developing for a week or so, so I’ll just give you the rundown real quick, all right? See, Mel Gibson was trying to make this movie called The Maccabees, which is weird, because the Maccabees were a bunch of hardcore, badass Jews, and that doesn’t really sound like Mel’s cup of tea, does it? But Mel got this guy named Joe Eszterhas to write the movie for him. Time went on, things happened, and then Warner Brothers was like “you know what, never mind, let’s not do this movie right now,” apparently because they weren’t feeling Joe’s script. So Joe wrote this big long letter to Mel, basically saying that Mel never wanted to make the movie in the first place, he just wanted people to get off his back for being such a bigot. He also went on and on (the letter’s nine pages long) about how crazy Mel is, about the awful things he called Jews and Oksana and about all the times he had to deal with Mel’s crazy ass. Mel responded with what was essentially just a big ol’ “nuh-uh,” and here we are.

So what’s the deal with the new recording? In the letter Joe wrote, he said that in December, he took his family down to Costa Rica to stay at Mel’s house down there, along with some other guests. One night, everyone was waiting for dinner, and Mel was checking out the internets, and he saw a picture of himself with his baby daughter, Luci, and he flipped out because “I look so f-cking old! I look horrible! That f-cking whore is destroying me! She’s taking my looks! I hate her! She’s destroying my life!” Totally rational, right?

Mel then, according to Joe, starting running around the house and knocking things over, and yelling about both Oksana and Joe’s script. He screamed a bunch of random obscenities, and then drove away. Is that believable? Could you see Mel doing all that? Of course you can. And if you can’t, here’s the recording to prove it:

Here’s the transcript so you can read along at home, since it’s a little hard to understand him when he gets all full of rage like that.