Turns out, Internet, that wishes do come true. How do I know? Because I wished on Twitter for Margaret Atwood to consent to an interview here at terribleminds and, in what must have been a fit of temporary madness (or sinister genius), she agreed. (I’m sure by now she’s regretting it.) I know I don’t have to tell you who she is — all I need to say is it is an honor and a pleasure to have someone of her talent and stature hanging out with us roughshod riff raff here, today. You can find her all over the Internet, but let’s start with her website at margaretatwood.ca and, on Twitter, @margaretatwood.

Let the interview commence!

This is a blog about writing and storytelling. So, tell us a story. As short or long as you care to make it. As true or false as you see it.

Once upon a time there was an amoeba. It ate things and divided in two. Then there were two amoebas. They swam around and ate things and divided in two. Then there were four amoebas. This can go on for a long time, and is why we humans developed sex and plots instead.

Why do you tell stories?

Because human beings are not amoebas – having been there and done that – they tell stories, as part of the package. We narrate, therefore we are. (And therefore we are not amoebas.) And I am a human being. Most of the time. Just not before breakfast. So I too narrate.

Give the audience one piece of writing or storytelling advice:

“Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em cry, make ‘em wait.” – Charles Dickens. Footnote: Maybe make ‘em wait first? But not too long. Especially not for the first corpse, should you be writing a crime story.

“Shouldn’t you give up the idea of being a writer, and get married and settle down instead?” (My undergraduate advisor, 1961. Note the either/or.)

What goes into writing a strong character? Bonus round: give an example.

‘Strong’ as in ‘makes a strong impression and is strongly convincing,’ I take it? Rather than ‘is muscular and does not let people kick sand in face at beach?’ Okay, thought so. Therefore: Has a purpose. Carries it out, albeit in devious ways, and not always with success. And: comes with memorable details attached. Example: Miss Havisham in Dickens’ Great Expectations. Memorable detail: the spider-covered bridal cake. (Not especially arachnidally correct. But memorable!)

Recommend a book, comic book, film, or game: something with great story. Go!

Great story = hooks you at once, pages must be turned? Or: everything in the story is necessary? Or: both?

Let’s see… It was a dark and stormy night…

Maybe not.

I’ll enter Poe’s ‘The Cask of Amontillado.’ Short. Dark. Terse. Or Ray Bradbury’s ‘The Martian:’ suggestive. Both make use of the repetitive patterning so noticeable in folktales.

For cunning choice of narrators to relate an inherently incredible story, hard to beat Wuthering Heights.

Favorite word?

For turning the twist in a story? How about ‘however,’ ‘despite that,’ or ‘nonetheless’? Or ‘meanwhile’?

Or do you mean ‘much-used’? (Thinks of several bad habits, such as ‘thinks.’)

Or maybe just one that comes to mind at inopportune moments, such as ‘mauve’? (Exercise: Use this word in an accusatory sentence, such as: ‘Why do you have to be so fucking mauve?’)

And then, the follow up: Favorite curse word?

Curse words never of course pass my lips, but they must pass those of some of my characters, the times being what they are, alas. Though their swearing is rather banal, I have to say. They say things like, ‘Why do you have to be so fucking mauve?’

However, here is one that I have unfortunately never had occasion to use in a story: ‘Crise de callisse de tabernak.’ It’s from Québec, and is said to be rather strong. As in, ‘Crise de calisse de tabernak, pourquoi cette connerie avec la mauve?’ (Translation: ‘Crisis of the chalice of the tabernacle, why this C-word stupidity with a mallow flower?’) I don’t want you using this in public, Chuck.

And if you want to impress your Canadian hosts, tell them you are a shoe fetishist and you just HAVE to get to the Bata Shoe Museum on Bloor because Margaret Atwood’s blue shoes with carved heels and peacock feathers are in there. They will be astounded by your inside knowledge!

Whatever Graeme Gibson pours out of the bottle. Right now it’s the Talisker, from the Isle of Skye.

Up yer kilt.

What’s next for you as a storyteller?

A guest appearance on Naomi Alderman’s listen-while-you-run game, Zombies! Run!. I will play the last Canadian standing. Or the last Torontonian. Or the last person left in the Whole Foods on Avenue Road, fighting them off with organic grapefruits. Or something. By the way, Naomi and are writing a serial two-hander that also features zombies, and will appear on the website Wattpad.com, beginning in late October. Am I having too much fun for an old person? Does it make me appear flighty?

This interview is made of so much win. Atwood is my go-to author when I know I want to read something good. Though as a writer, reading her work sometimes depresses me (I will never be that good, waaah etc).

I met her in Aberdeen last year and babbled on about how much I liked her poem about a cat, therefore probably coming across like a total weirdo. I tried to play it cool and then devolved into gibbering fangirl. Damnit.

I’m with Laura — unbelievable score! I’d be babbling and mumbling like an idiot. I’ve always resisted putting Margaret Atwood on my list of authors I’d love to have dinner with, because it would just be embarrassing for both of us…

I think I’m most amazed that almost everything she says could be a quote stenciled on the bookstore wall. “Why do you have to be so fucking mauve?” (Okay, maybe not that one for the bookstore. But classic nonetheless…) And she is so irreverent of herself — how do you get to be Margaret Atwood and not think you’re the shit?

I’ve been putting off buying Zombies, Run! for ages now, on the basis that I feel more obligated to exercise regularly the more money I spend on related paraphernalia. It seems the bibliophile in me may have to overrule the sloth.

Having just returned from a tour of Scotland, including the isle of Skye and the Talisker distillery, I can attest to the wonderfulness that is single-malt Scotch, and heaven that is Talisker. (Cut it with just a few drops of cold water, to fully bring out the rich variety of flavors.)

When I saw this interview in my feed, I got really excited. It’s so amazing you were able to interview her!

I just finished The Year of the Flood last week, and can’t wait for MaddAddam. Those (including Oryx and Crake) are the first Atwood books I’ve read. So until the third one comes out, I’ll have plenty of time to read her other works. She is now definitely one of my favorite authors.

I am trying to be patient waiting for that third book in the MaddAdam trilogy. The first two were by far my favorite books of the past 5 years. Her short stories are so very good as well. A great author! Thank you and great job.

[…] Margaret Atwood writes amazing dystopian novels and enjoys a good scotch, which must mean that she and I should be friends, too. Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this. […]

Wow! Margret Atwood. Chuck, I didn’t realize you were such an important guy in the literary world. My respect for you has just went up half a notch, maybe even 6/10ths a notch!
Being a Canadian means I know Atwood from mandatory readings in hgh school…and being a bookworm, from voluntary reading after school. She is a fiesty, hilarious one eh?
Where and when are you coming to Canada?

Fantastic interview – and huge thanks to Ms. Atwood for delivering such a delightful set of responses. She’s such a fantastic author, and it’s nice to learn she’s down to earth enough to still enjoy interviews and talking with writers about writing – because that enjoyment clearly comes through here.

The mauve indeed–wow! Great interview. Great host. Grrrreat guest. Thanks for sharing, Margaret–that inside info on Canada will come in handy one day, I know it. This is a post I’ll be coming back to read and reread and rereread (ad infinitum).

[…] that Twitter is underestimated by many authors. It is a phenomenal way to connect with people. See Chuck’s interview with Margaret Atwood. Writing helps you reach an audience with ripples, but twitter helps you throw out more pebbles […]