The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 8.20.14

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where I think I may have solved this whole Jared Leto’s penis is a Praetorian Guard thing by finding this Kelly Osbourne pic. Which isn’t to say I think she had sex with Alexis Arquette, but more of a suggestion that maybe she’s actually been a genital growth on Jordan Catalano’s sac this whole time. Think about it, it makes sense. I also discovered that no matter how shitfaced Kiefer Sutherland gets, he always finds the time to violently interact with fans, and that from now on Brian Singer shouldn’t excitedly smile because boy rape.

When you appear happy, Brian Singer, we all thinks it’s because of boy rape,