Afghan President, Hamid Karzai, will stepping down. Soon. In two years.

President Hamid Karzai a-pointing his successor

With the end in sight, the corruption-interested world, viz. the Karzai family, is taking a look back on the last decade wherein they have secretly amassed a massive fortune and are in the throes of fighting over who earned what and who embezzled how much. The assassination of Ahmed Wali Karzai, the President’s brother (or son or whatever) and ex-family-tribe leader, is looking rather fratricidal, and the newly appointed family-tribe leader, the brother who replaced him, Shah Wali Karzai, is looking rather abominable.

Ahmed Wali Karzai telling you to GTFO of his pillow room.

Ahmed Wali Karzai was undoubtedly a nefarious family-tribe-leader-brother-son. He was, however, an American citizen and has been since last millennium. Ahmed worked as a waiter in Chicago, then moved back to Afghanistan in 2001 to become one of the most powerful men in the country.

Try the lobster bisque, one of our chef’s finest creations.

It has been alleged that much of the political and business operations take place out of the public eye, which is rare these days. Ahmed Wali was suspected to have been involved in the Afghan opium trade. Doesn’t the opium trade account for, like, %80 of Afghanistan’s economy? How could he not, right?

Note: Controlled/Occupied by Transitional Government in ’04

Who else could possibly be profiting from the Afghan opium trade? Some war-profiteering mongrels, I guess. I have no idea. But hey, look who’s clapping.

Shah Wali, who replaced Ahmed Wali after his assassination as leader of the tribe-family-thing, viz. the Populzai tribe of the Kandahar region, is even more corrupt. He caused a rift in the family, when he embezzled $55 million from his brother Mahmoud Karzai’s corporation, AFCO, which oversees infrastructure and development in Afghanistan. Shah Wali said he did it to protect the people of Kandahar, because who knows what could happen or where the hell money could end up in Afghanistan. Essentially, he embezzled the millions to protect Afghans from corrupt individuals like himself.

The Karzais are all pointing fingers at each other, but the truth is, they’re all pointing at themselves.

If you’re Afghan and not a Karzai, good luck.

If you’re Afghan and a Karzai, watch your back.

Keeping it white-gloved

Also, if you become a waiter in the U.S., you might assume a life of wealth and power.

Not a Karzai

If you’re a Karzai—sorry.

Hamid Karzai will soon be stepping down from his post as President in two years, but I don’t understand why we’re even discussing that because two years isn’t soon.

Soon, this finger might be pointing at you, if you dare send your overcooked fish back to the kitchen.