Why American Idol Has Me Worried

Are you guys watching? I have to admit, I am. I haven't tuned in to AI since the Clay Aiken season and it really isn't my cup of tea (I'm very particular about reality TV) but this year, I'm in. And I'm loving it. But here's what baffles me: Some of these people think they're really good. And they're really not. They're completely shocked when they don't make it to Hollywood. Seriously? Nick and I had an entire conversation about this the other night. I can't help but wonder...

What if I'm not as talented as I think I am either? I truly believe I'm very good at certain things. What if I'm actually totally average in every way. What if my confidence is simply a result of having parents who told me I could do and be whatever I wanted? What if it's all in my mind? In a former life, I was an athlete and an artist—talent in these areas can be subjective. Art for obvious reasons and sports, well, if you have a coach who doesn't like you, you don't play. I thought I was pretty good at both of those things. I won lots of awards for each. And yet looking back on my life, I can't help but wonder if I was semi-delusional. Then there's my writing. And my cooking. I feel like I've hit my stride in both areas, I do them with gusto, but what if I'm actually singing off key? OMG, what if I'm really William Hung?

I think a certain amount of confidence in yourself is necessary despite what talent you have to back it up. But then there's just plain delusional. I hate that a show like this is making me question my skills but there it is. Perhaps I should have titled this embarrassing confessions. Anyone else think about this? Have you questioned your skill level/talent/confidence lately? And, if you don't have your own personal Simon to cut you down, does it really matter? Let's discuss.

P.S., So far I like the rocker chick from last week who sang Baracuda and the theatrical dude from last night who sang Bohemian Rhapsody.