Writing for me to chronicle my endeavors and struggles during this strange season of life. Writing for me to keep from getting stuck in my own head. Writing to hopefully entertain and touch other people. Writing for anyone who interested to understand how my heart and my mind work.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Have You Ever Seen the Rain?

Song titles and/or lyrics keep jumping into my head as I feel compelled to write, so I'm going with it for titles. :)

Now if only I could play them...

I am less than two weeks from departure for Belize. I am heading out with the team from Cornerstone on November 6th. I am nervous and excited. I knew this would be an interesting, challenging endeavor, but I, and pretty much everyone else who is going or there, have been met with more challenges than I would have anticipated. There have been at least a few circumstances come up that have to be more than coincidence.

In my faith, I don't believe in coincidence any longer. Early on in planning for a mission trip, I have been warned several times, by several people, to be mindful of things that will happen that may derail our efforts. Christians call it spiritual warfare. I can appreciate how crazy that sounds if you're not a believer, so I'm just going to leave it at that, but I can tell you that I'm seeing it for myself, repeatedly.

We have already had a handful of team members drop out for various reasons, and that is their own story to tell of unforeseen circumstances. Now for myself, a few weeks ago I was wrestling with insecurities which are the chink in my armor that were slapped into my face with awful timing for being out of the country. Although I recognized it for what it was and was able to quash those insecurities and continue on with prepping for the trip, it eventually became self-fulfilling prophecy. I've now found myself in an uncomfortably fragile emotional state, which initially made me feel, "great, now I have to go on this trip and try to smile and help others." However, I am finding the timing is perfect (big shocker there, God) and that it is giving me something outside of myself to pour into and hopefully come back with a new perspective, and renewed faith. Further I am being challenged to trust that I will even be able to go, because I have found raising support to be more difficult than I had anticipated.

You may or may not pay attention to international weather events...I mean, come on, who doesn't? But over the last few days Belize, which is about the size of Massachusetts and sits on the shores of the Caribbean, was hit by Hurricane Richard. (what a....ok I'm going to keep it classy and avoid "Richard" jokes). It was a Category 1 at 90 mph, and I've learned the cutoff for a Category 2 is 100 mph. The mission base at Gales Point was successfully evacuated, and although none of the villagers would leave, everyone was safe. I've just learned that the damage is severe. John and Mel Bjorgen are the couple from Cornerstone who are the full time missionaries, and they just had a baby last week. They are all safe, but their apartment was flooded, and they now don't have a place to stay. The base also sustained significant damage as well as the village with roofs torn off and several homes were destroyed. Again, it is wonderful perfect timing that we are going now, so that we can assist with the rebuilding and cleanup efforts so quickly.

In all of this, all I can say is that the team heading down from Cornerstone, our friends and family, and the people already in Belize need prayer. The team has been amazing at supporting each other, and I am so excited to have these people in my life. I will continue to update for anyone who is interested, as well as for myself to put my thoughts out there and away from my head....

1 comment:

Wow, i hope you dont mind me commenting, I almost feel like I am blog stalking you... I just am really touched by your heart for all this and how you can see the truth even in the darkness. it seems to me that our Father God is working in your life and calling out your heart and he isn't hiding the fact at all. I am so encouraged by your endeavors and struggles lately, plus your wit keeps me rolling as in ROFL =oD