I was thinking of what to write today when I came across the below post on bliss.

The Merriam Webster dictionary defines bliss as “complete happiness.” While it is not a bad definition, in my mind, it misses out on the major ingredient; complete peace.

I remember two instances in my life where I have felt bliss. Neither one of the times resulting from anything extraordinary happening.

The first time was when I was about 30 years-old. I was upstate New York with my first husband having dinner at my friend Billy’s home. Billy was a furniture maker. He actually went out to his 60 acres of land and chose the wood he would use to make his pieces. He was not a hip or particularly educated man – I mention that because at the time those were values that mattered to me – but Billy was an exceptionally nice and genuine guy.

Anyway, Billy and his girlfriend had made dinner for us. It was simple and served in the kitchen. When we finished, I got up and went to sit in the living-room. Actually, I sat on Krumpus’ couch. Krumpus was a very smart dog and he only let two people sit in his couch – Billy and me.

The fire was roaring in the fireplace. No sounds were coming from the outside. As I sat in that couch I felt an amazing sensation of belonging, of being part of the universe. For the moments it lasted, I felt integrated and at peace. I didn’t have to do anything or be anybody. I just was. I didn’t even need to be happy. It seems to me, looking back at that moment, that happiness would have been a lesser feeling than what I felt. Unfortunately, my bliss didn’t last long. As quickly as it came it left me.

The second and last time I felt bliss was again upstate New York. This time in a lake by myself. The day was beautiful and I sat in the water at the edge of a lake. Within seconds I was surrounded by small fish. Again, that feeling of complete connectedness took over every cell of my body.

I have had many incredible moments and experiences in my life, but these two simple situations were the ones that gave me bliss. What I learn from them is that belonging, complete contentment, bliss, doesn’t have to come from standing in one’s head or doing cartwheels. It can come from lying down on a coach by a fire or sitting in water watching the fish swim. Sometimes, we spend all of our time chasing after things that we believe will give us bliss, while all along passing up on simple opportunities that would give us the much sought after feeling.

Please read on.

What Is Bliss?

By Sean Meshorer

Shortly after I’d given my publisher my manuscript about bliss, I had coffee with a friend who asked me: What, exactly, is bliss?

I didn’t have an easy answer. It had taken an entire book to lay out what I’d learned from teaching a class series in Los Angeles, where I’d seen people of all ages, backgrounds, ethnicities, age ranges, and personalities improve their happiness and spiritual awareness. I’d spent 20 years studying advanced meditative practices and global religious histories — both as a spiritual teacher, minister, counselor, and on my own journey. But even writing several chapters about bliss and how to get it didn’t make it any easier to describe in a few words…Continued

Posted below is an excellent article I found today in the New York Times – albeit a little late, it was published on May 16th.

It’s about Martin Seligman’s new book, “Flourish”. Seligman is also the writer of the 2002 bestseller “American Happiness” and founder of the positive psychology movement.

It is an excellent post because it states that happiness is overrated. The post then goes on to describe what the feeling of well-being is, and the necessary elements to get there. It lists 5 elements and they are: 1- positive emotion, 2 – engagement, 3 – relationships, 4 – meaning and 5 – accomplishment. These five elements together create a sense of well-being which is actually permanent and not transient like happiness.

When I lived in NYC, many years ago, I had a house upstate NY in an area which at the time was mostly economically depressed but had amazing mountains, lakes and streams. I was living in a very abusive relationship which lasted eleven years. My refuge was going upstate.

I had a friend there who had been born and raised in the small town where my house was. He built custom made furniture and lived alone in the woods. He planted and cut his own trees to make beautiful tables, chairs, and beds. He led a simple life with his dog who only liked two people; him and me.

One night, my friend invited the man I lived with and me to come to dinner. It was winter, and the night was really quiet.