Like this:

Ok, so you’re saying that TSA agents are going to be asking us questions and then, based on our responses, deciding whether we’re a threat or not? C’mon, you’re joking, right?

Nope. According to this story, it’s true. The trial program kicks off at Boston Logan International Airport next week.

The idea (patterned after Israeli security tactics) is to “require passengers to answer several questions as they hand over their boarding passes – basic stuff along the lines of, ‘Where are you headed?’ The aim is to analyze so-called micro-expressions – small, involuntary emotional reactions to stimuli. People who seem tense or untrustworthy . . . will be given full body scans.”

Well now, I’m sure you can recognize a great idea when you hear it, right? Recognize this one? Yeah, didn’t think so.

But what is amazing is that the FAA thinks this really is a great idea. Of course, given the fact that TSA agents are renown for their sensitivity and ability wisely to refrain from overreacting to comments from passengers, not to mention their skill in observing subtle markers that travelers put out by their body language and facial expressions when asked questions by these amazing Guardians of Our Safety — why would they think otherwise?

Incredible.

Honestly, not even Saturday Night Live in its heyday could satirize the TSA any better than this.