hi tori,
from what you have said over the months you have been here i don't think you married a man with the abilities you seek. if they were there you would be awash with loving compassion, comfort and helping hands.
you are the only one who can decide what you are willing to live with in order to feel loved. do the best you can and keep your eyes and heart open should that moment come when all the universe says set yourself free. then be strong enough to do it.
you know i ended 2 relationships due to lack of compassion and kindness. the last thing i need in my life is someone standing over me telling me i am not good enough. okay, i am not good enough for you, so go, find the one who is, i set you free, and in doing so i set myself free too. free to be the best me i can within the body i have.
you will find your way. whatever direction that may be. till then i wish you the peace of not believing all that you hear.
you really kicked arse on the house. bravo girl! bet you found muscles you forgot you had! i am really proud of you! umm, just a thought, if he wants babies he can do it himself? or pay someone to do it for him. like one of the kids?
peace and hugs,
blue

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