Oh, what a wonderful time. And so thrilled that you embraced the everyone bring something. I always want to go with something and I am sure everyone feels the same way. :)I'm hosting our family brunch on Sunday and you can bet everyone is bringing something...hee hee

I love to say, "this is what we are providing, feel free to bring something to go with it." We never tell anyone they have to bring a dish to pass, just let them know they are welcome to do so. Most people do it, but if they don't, no one cares. We host a large picnic at Labor Day and have heard so many comments about how good the food always is. I feel that when you are taking one thing you often take one of your best recipes. When everyone brings their best recipes, it makes for an amazing buffet. Plus no one person works too hard. I also feel that by doing it this way, a reluctant host, is more likely to invite people over, because she will know, that it's ok to not do everything herself.

Everything was absolutely beautiful, you went above and beyond. I probably would have gone with paper plates but for my next get together I will have to step it up a couple of notches. Thanks for the inspiration.

I cannot believe I did not take out my camera. You had some great organizing shots ;)

I never mind bringing something but can't bring myself to ask anyone to bring a dish to my home. It somehow feels awkward to me and I never know how to set out what is brought. Did you put the pastries from Panera on a matching plate? What do you do with duplicate dishes or things on plates that totally clash with your tablescape? How do you handle people offering to leave the leftovers with you? Do you accept or wrap them for the guest to take home (if so, how do you graciously refuse?)

See how complicated I make this? I am fine with a potluck picnic or very casual barbeque but a brunch or dinner, not so much, unless maybe someone offers to make a fabulous dessert (but then again I wonder if others then feel like they should have contributed). For me, I just prefer to do everything myself and not dealing with any issues! Just curious how others feel about having guests bring a dish. I also think that tradition in your part of the country plays a part in the "What can I bring?" syndrome. I have lived in several states and now realize that some people probably thought I was rude because I didn't ask that question when invited!!!

Lovely - just lovely! You always have the best ideas!As I approach my 'entertaining season' - I have to admit that I feel still a bit of the southern 'perfection' bug - have not let go - yet. Can't do potlucks ever, yet.

Even when the thought 'crosses' my mind: I can hear my mama say, 'when you ask people over to your home, do not put obligation on them to make food for 'your' guests - I want to break away, but her voice is quietly chanting in both ears when I feel the urge -"Go away mama! Go awayyyyy!" ha ha ha

Thank God for your small steps toward letting go - Just might be the welcome mat I need to get started --- right behind you sister...

latriceps. still need your addy for the book thingy --- :)working mama in the northwest!

So right--letting go of perfection leads to "even better." Whether or not to ask for or even accept guests' dishes is certainly a cultural expectation. When I married into a Filipino family I was at first very uncomfortable with visitors bringing food; I felt it implied what I offered wasn't adequate. But over time I have come to see that it is a sense of sharing, and what could be more hospitable than that. Now with all my entertaining I do much what Angela does: plan a menu that includes main dish and basic sides in quantities adequate to feed everyone and to those who ask "what can I bring" answer "a side dish that you would like to eat with (main dish I am preparing)" or sometimes "your favorite beverage." It does result in too much food but that's ok because another part of Filipino culture is to send everyone home with assorted leftovers. With our mom's group we all just take what we brought unless someone offers their extras around.

I'm learning more & more how to let-go of perfection and embrace the "good enough". I don't want to be a "Martha" entertainer {as in Mary/Martha in the Bible}, but rather enjoy my guests. It's a journey....