Okay, I know there is a ton of posts about anal sex, but I really not "no holds barred" advice. My boyfriend and I would like to start to play anally..he has done it before, but I haven't. Mostly because my last boyfriends acted like little giggling boys about the subject...not exactly a turn on. But, also I honestly don't know what to do to prepare for it. I mean, our sex life is amazing and we have sex very often..spontaneous. But I don't think you can be spontaneous playing anally? or can you?

I love dirty, messy, and hot sex...but I would rather not have a real "messy" moment with my boyfriend as he is either preparing me to try and take his 8.5 inch cock..or actually taking it. What do I need to do? My gay friends I know sometimes use enemas...but I don't think I can do that all the time...just in case?

I've got to tell you, the idea of you being into trying anal (rather than just doing it for him) is so fucking hot. It makes me want to be the one ot break you in.

Some of the gay men may have better advice, but as far as I'm concerned, anal sex isn't really something that's set up for a spontaneous. It takes some preparation.

While enemas may be the best thing, you can try glycerin suppositories for an easier, neater experience. Put a couple in. Wait 45 minutes. Use the bathroom. Repeat the process.

As far as getting in, relax. Start with a finger then two. Take it slow and use lots of lube Have him slip in an inch and take it all the way out. Put in two inches and then all the way out. You'll get used to it, especially when you see the look on his face.

Okay, I know there is a ton of posts about anal sex, but I really not "no holds barred" advice. My boyfriend and I would like to start to play anally..he has done it before, but I haven't. Mostly because my last boyfriends acted like little giggling boys about the subject...not exactly a turn on. But, also I honestly don't know what to do to prepare for it. I mean, our sex life is amazing and we have sex very often..spontaneous. But I don't think you can be spontaneous playing anally? or can you?

I love dirty, messy, and hot sex...but I would rather not have a real "messy" moment with my boyfriend as he is either preparing me to try and take his 8.5 inch cock..or actually taking it. What do I need to do? My gay friends I know sometimes use enemas...but I don't think I can do that all the time...just in case?

I've got to tell you, the idea of you being into trying anal (rather than just doing it for him) is so fucking hot. It makes me want to be the one ot break you in.

Some of the gay men may have better advice, but as far as I'm concerned, anal sex isn't really something that's set up for a spontaneous. It takes some preparation.

While enemas may be the best thing, you can try glycerin suppositories for an easier, neater experience. Put a couple in. Wait 45 minutes. Use the bathroom. Repeat the process.

As far as getting in, relax. Start with a finger then two. Take it slow and use lots of lube Have him slip in an inch and take it all the way out. Put in two inches and then all the way out. You'll get used to it, especially when you see the look on his face.

VerifiedGold Member

Anal needs a little bit of planning and is not as spontaneous as conventional sex, or it can be rather messy as you say.
An enema is probably the only way you willl be truly clean but not essential. Best to make sure you get rid of any waste matter at least an hour or so before, and have a good soapy shower (inserting a soapy finger and having a good squidge around) then rinse well with clean water.

As recommended plenty of lube is a must, and you might be best with him using his fingers and maybe a small dildo to get you relaxed and used to being stretched. At nearly 9 inches he will have to be patient and go real slow to start.

Gold Member

Anal needs a little bit of planning and is not as spontaneous as conventional sex, or it can be rather messy as you say.
An enema is probably the only way you willl be truly clean but not essential. Best to make sure you get rid of any waste matter at least an hour or so before, and have a good soapy shower (inserting a soapy finger and having a good squidge around) then rinse well with clean water.

As recommended plenty of lube is a must, and you might be best with him using his fingers and maybe a small dildo to get you relaxed and used to being stretched. At nearly 9 inches he will have to be patient and go real slow to start.

Good luck and have a wonderful time.

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Not only is a good, thorough wash-out vital, but you need to allow yourself time to "dry out": trust me on this. As much as I love fucking ass (and I do so love fucking ass), all it takes is one last squirt or leak and I'm done.

As far as foreplay goes, I'd say the longer the better, especially for a newbie. By longer I mean 30-45 minutes at least. Getting yourself ready is nothing to rush into. Analingus (anal/oral contact) is a requirement.

Not every bottom enjoys fingering as part of the opening-up process, no matter how gentle the top can try and be. You might have better luck with a soft, very pliable dildo: it's not so insistent as a finger or two (or three or four )

I have to admit that I've only had vaginal sex with women, never anal. But I have 30+ years experience fucking men, and I've noticed that as many bottoms respond to the pleasure they're deriving with their ass alone as with their ass and penis in combination: they focus on their ass at the exclusion of their penis.

You might be similarly wired, or maybe not. But I would like to at least suggest that you not focus unduly on your clitoris when getting fucked in the ass, at least not at first. Men have "assgasms", and so might you.

I'll also suggest that some lubes are better for anal sex than others. Superpremium lubes are silicone based, like Gun Oil or Eros. They are silky and smooth and thicker than baby oil but not as thick as KY. They also are the only condom-friendly lube that stays wet indefinitely. But it is extremely expensive.

If condoms are not an issue for you, then I'd recommend Elbow Grease, which is odorless, stays wet forever, and has the consistency of cold cream. It is by far my preferred lube.

Crisco, BTW, is flawless and inexpensive. But don't keep an open can in the nightstand for more than a week or so. It can attract bacteria.

Thank you Bbucko! We have discussed how to warm me up for him..and to be honest I'm not so nervous about that. More nervous about being a messy affair. I wish I could get over that....so I guess what you mean by "drying out" is that after a enema...make sure that all is out of there?

Not only is a good, thorough wash-out vital, but you need to allow yourself time to "dry out": trust me on this. As much as I love fucking ass (and I do so love fucking ass), all it takes is one last squirt or leak and I'm done.

As far as foreplay goes, I'd say the longer the better, especially for a newbie. By longer I mean 30-45 minutes at least. Getting yourself ready is nothing to rush into. Analingus (anal/oral contact) is a requirement.

Not every bottom enjoys fingering as part of the opening-up process, no matter how gentle the top can try and be. You might have better luck with a soft, very pliable dildo: it's not so insistent as a finger or two (or three or four )

I have to admit that I've only had vaginal sex with women, never anal. But I have 30+ years experience fucking men, and I've noticed that as many bottoms respond to the pleasure they're deriving with their ass alone as with their ass and penis in combination: they focus on their ass at the exclusion of their penis.

You might be similarly wired, or maybe not. But I would like to at least suggest that you not focus unduly on your clitoris when getting fucked in the ass, at least not at first. Men have "assgasms", and so might you.

I'll also suggest that some lubes are better for anal sex than others. Superpremium lubes are silicone based, like Gun Oil or Eros. They are silky and smooth and thicker than baby oil but not as thick as KY. They also are the only condom-friendly lube that stays wet indefinitely. But it is extremely expensive.

If condoms are not an issue for you, then I'd recommend Elbow Grease, which is odorless, stays wet forever, and has the consistency of cold cream. It is by far my preferred lube.

Crisco, BTW, is flawless and inexpensive. But don't keep an open can in the nightstand for more than a week or so. It can attract bacteria.

NOT so much, cause, due to the fact I'm single, and not much into that 'ONE-NIGHT-STAND' thing, it's been hard finding a partner to help me with it...ANY VOLUNTEERS?

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*waving my hand in the air* "Oh, pick me, pick me!!"
I will be ready and patient anytime.

Pin-up Beauty, I think you can usually give yourself a decent cleaning in the shower with soap and water after a visit to the toilet. The guys I have been with told me that's how they prep. And yeah, your bf is lucky.

If 220483 turns down my offer, maybe you guys will let Eastbaydude (himself quite a looker) and I watch....

Gold Member

Thank you Bbucko! We have discussed how to warm me up for him..and to be honest I'm not so nervous about that. More nervous about being a messy affair. I wish I could get over that....so I guess what you mean by "drying out" is that after a enema...make sure that all is out of there?

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That precisely what I mean, sweetie.

A while back I hooked up with a guy who rushed his wash-out. We were barely started when, to my horror, some of the enema fluid started dripping out of his ass.

I am an extreme perv, but even I draw the line at scat. The moment was gone, my mood as deflated as my hardon, and I had him dressed and out the door in minutes.

You need to get in tune with your bowels. Are you regular? For day to day assplay, it may be that an enema is more than you need. For example- Some evening when you think you might want to play out back, try and have a good BM earlier in the day. Douching out your rectum might be sufficient to ensure a clean session. Douching with a bulb syringe type device in far less intrusive than a full enema, which can leave you with pockets of (shitty)water waiting to surprise you later. Cramping can be a side effect of overdoing it, particularly if you use a hose and nozzle hooked directly to your bath faucet, like a Shower Shot.
As you become more familiar with how things feel down there, you will begin to recognize how clean you may or may not be in the next few hours. Maintain decent fiber in your diet and if you are simply able to take a good healthy crap you'll be 95% of the way to having a clean, fuckable ass. Cheers!

My GF actually mentioned trying it after we've dated for a little while. What we found worked best (obviously including lube) was having her ease herself onto me, letting her control it. She lays on her side, as if we were going to spoon and I would kneel upright straddling her bottom leg and the other bent and pulled up a little towards her chest (not sure if this is making sense).

For the man patience here is key, you don't want to start getting over zealous and start pushing further in too soon. For her it takes about a minute or so, never really timed it, for her to start moving on me at a good rhythm. Once we get to this point we'll move to other positions, but starting out this way has always lead to a great experience for the both of us.

My GF and I often have anal sex. Our routine is to use baby oil (lots) and I start by slowly rubbing my cock between her ass cheeks in the "spooning" position, laying on our sides. I do not push directly inwards, just along the crack of her bum. After some time I can feel the area around her anus becoming relaxed and my cock head will feel a soft point, or depression when I pass over it. I then change position and let my cock head push lightly against her hole, some slight movement helps, but I don't push hard. Eventually I can feel my cock start to push past her sphincter, I stop at this point hold some forward pressure and wait. If she is relaxed enough, I will feel myself slowly enter. Again I wait till she has gotten used to it, then start very slowly moving in and out but only short strokes till she is ready for something more enthusiastic. The first few times we did this I had to give up before cumming as it was uncomfortable for her. After a few times it become easier for her, now she loves the slow rubbing stage and when she is ready she will take my cock and put it on the entrance to her anus. When she is has become used to my cock in her, we can do various positions without discomfort and entering again after changing position is easy, just like normal fucking.
The key is time, take a lot, lots of lube, and communicate.
I find it very uncomfortable initially to take a large cock in my ass doggy style or standing, but if I am on top straddling the guy, I find it very easy and enjoyable because I can control the amount of penetration, and of course he or I play with my cock and that makes me want to have it all that cock inside me as soon as possible.

You need to get in tune with your bowels. Are you regular? For day to day assplay, it may be that an enema is more than you need. For example- Some evening when you think you might want to play out back, try and have a good BM earlier in the day. Douching out your rectum might be sufficient to ensure a clean session. Douching with a bulb syringe type device in far less intrusive than a full enema, which can leave you with pockets of (shitty)water waiting to surprise you later. Cramping can be a side effect of overdoing it, particularly if you use a hose and nozzle hooked directly to your bath faucet, like a Shower Shot.
As you become more familiar with how things feel down there, you will begin to recognize how clean you may or may not be in the next few hours. Maintain decent fiber in your diet and if you are simply able to take a good healthy crap you'll be 95% of the way to having a clean, fuckable ass. Cheers!