Friday, October 12, 2012

I just wanted to give you all a little update on the situation, and I wanted to let you all know how I was doing.

My nerves are doing much better. For about 3 days during the start of all of that mess I hadn't really slept, eaten, or done, really anything.

I gave in to those cruel people, and it kills me - But I am just happy I feel sane again. My rats are over at my friends house. I see them all the time - It makes me sad not being able to sit on my bed with a rat on my lap, but fortunately, they're still close, and I can always go over there.

I talked to the management woman (Sally, we called her) and told her that I found another place for my rats. She told me she needed to come into out home for an inspection.. LOL.

I'm really upset by it, because it's absolutely ridiculous that we have to to let some stranger into our home, because of someones false accusations ( I found out a lot of other stuff, about rumors that were going on around my neighborhood, about me - Absolutely disgusting, and I won't even mention them)
But if that's what makes this ignorant woman happy, so be it.

I just want to be left alone.

We've been really busy straightening up, and just pretty much making our house perfect, so she can't complain about anything else.

I've been working at home on stuff for about 12 hours a day, and have only been getting about 5 hours of sleep at night (never sound though, because of my nerves :(.)

I honestly just can't wait until out "appointment' Monday, so she can come in, and then never bother us again.

Compared to how sick I felt last week, I am doing much, much, better, but I'm definitely still feeling anxiety, because I even have to deal with this woman.

Once it's all over things will start picking up again here on Rats and More. I've been working on a couple things, and I have a lot more coming soon, but with all of this nonsense over here, everything got pushed back a little - But I promise, lots of reviews and some giveaways, coming soon! :)

I am just trying to let everyone know that I am still doing okay. I've had a lot of negative thoughts running through my mind, but I just keep telling myself it will all be okay, and it will all work out in the end.

Some of you were concerned that I was going to hurt myself or something, and I just wanted to let you all know that was not the case. I am staying as strong as I can, and taking comfort in knowing that my rats will be with a close trusted friend, who I can visit at any time.

Saturday, October 6, 2012

I think this may be the hardest to write out of all of the posts I've written so far.

It means so much to me, to see that you all see me as a strong woman, who can really take this all on.

I'm sorry if I've disappointed, or am disappointing anyone now, but I found a very close local friend to take them in. She lives on 5 acres of land, and has a great spacious area. I've talked it through with her, and she is willing to take them in. I'm allowed to go over any time I want, and I will still be caring for them - Buying there food, litter and going over there a couple times a week to clean there cages.

I'll also be going over at least ever other day to change there water, and take care of them, play with them, and give them the love they deserve. The other days, she'll be caring for them - She's promised to give them lots of love for me.

This is a woman, I would trust my own life with. She was one of my grandpa's best friends, and she is one of mine, and my families as well.

Luckily my friend has many more years than I do of experience with all types of animals, from rats, farm animals, cats and many other breeds of animals. I know taking them to her, besides keeping them with me, was the absolute best thing I could do for them.

I don't have the strength to fight this battle. We are okay with our financial situation, but when I think of lawyers, I think of paying thousands and thousands of dollars. While we do have some money, it's not like we have thousands and thousands of dollars to put into something, that I might not even win.

I'm not an emotionally strong person. I've spent almost an entire year without my medicine, but is with sadness that I am saying I am going to call my Psychiatrist, to talk this through with him, and also get re-medicated.

I've had suicidal thoughts all day today and yesterday, and I'm embarrassed to be admitting it - I wish I was the strong person you all think I am; But I'm not. I feel like a robot - I have one thing on my mind, and that's it. I can't keep it together right now. Maybe after I am stronger, I can go and possibly talk to the board members, and have them change there minds. If not, they'll be staying with my friend indefinitely.

Like I said, I can still see them anytime I want, and I promise I'll take pictures of them sometimes when I go over there, so you can all see them too.

This is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life, and I just don't feel like I have any other options.

Thank you all for baring through this with me. It's been the most emotional roller coaster ride of my life - And I can't even describe how I'm feeling. I feel like a failure, and a let down, and I know I am going to be emotionally drained today, and probably for the rest of the week.

But because I am on a schedule, I still have to bare through it, and get some reviews up. I'll try to keep them happy, and positive, like normal, I promise.

I'm sorry everyone. I have so much that I needed to do, and I still need to do it, because I have to have certain posts up and stuff. I will be posting various posts over the next few days because they need to be up to stay on schedule, but after these posts are done, I may not post for a while.

I'm so depressed. I still haven't eaten, I haven't smiled, I haven't done anything. I don't know how to fight this battle. I just feel like, curling up and dying. My brain doesn't seem like it's functioning right, right now. I don't know how to handle any of this.

I know a lot of you are trying to help, but every time I read a new comment I break out in tears.

I try to be this happy person, but how can I be when I have people literally trying to ruin my life. I have all of you supporting me, but I don't have anyone on my side here with me, to help me tackle this. I'm the type of person who keeps to there self, but when it comes to getting stuff done, like the paperwork for College, the case I need to put together for this, everything - It scares me into submission, and I just go curl up in the corner.

Friday, October 5, 2012

Well, today, my world kind-of came crumbling down. I don't know how many of you knew about this, but I live in a gated community. Let me first start off by saying that gated communities are, well, for lack of a better word, hell.

Everyone gets in your business, and the "board" makes the most stupid decisions. Every few years there are "votes" to decide who is the President of the neighborhood, treasurer, secretary, etc. - And yet during these "votes" we aren't really well notified. It's not just when it comes to the votes either. If there are big decisions to be made, it's all based on what these 4-5 board members want (and maybe a few other people, who have nothing better to do than attend a meeting in the evening.)

Well every month or so there are meetings (that nobody is notified about) at our clubhouse. And apparently, during the last meeting. I was brought up. There used to be a large wooded area right north of our neighborhood, but there is being a new neighborhood built, and so they are clearing the wooded area over there, out. As a result, a lot of unwanted pests and animals have come into our neighborhood - One of those pests, being wild rats.

According to some people, the wild rat problem was my fault, because the wild rats could smell my rats, and it was bringing them all to our neighborhood (as well as snakes.)

Well apparently, someone who lives in my neighborhood found out I have rats. Normally, I keep my pet rats inside of my home - But when the weather is really nice (cool, but not too hot, or too cold) I put them out on my back porch, so they can get fresh air. Well the past couple weeks, the weather has been perfect, so I've had them out there.

Somebody, somehow, saw my domesticated, pet rats, and reported me to the "board." Today, I received a letter in the mail from them, basically stating that I am "raising white rats in my garage" The letter also states that if I don't take action within 21 days of the date on the letter, that I will be reported to animal control, and will receive a fine of $100 a day for up to 10 days, if the problem isn't contained.

So today, I went to a few of the board members homes. I talked to the "President" who told me that I am not allowed to have pet rats based on one of the documents we received when we moved into our home, 10+ years ago. I was provided with said document, which states the following:

"Section 7.18. Pets and Animals.

A. Commonly accepted household pets such as dogs, cats and birds may be kept in reasonable numbers. All animals shall be contained on the Owner's Plot and are not permitted to roam freely. Commercial activities involving pets are not allowed.

B. No horses, cows, hogs, pigs, swine, goats, chicken, pigeons or any other such animals shall be kept on any of the properties."

So, let's review that, and break it down. It states that commonly accepted pets are allowed. So let me ask you, would you consider a small animal a "commonly accepted pet?" I would - I'd say a vast majority of kids, when growing up have, small, common pets, such as hamsters, rats, gerbils, etc.

And then let's see, it says things that we are not allowed to have include.. UHHHHHHH... Farm Animals?! It says "or any other such animals" hmmm, based on that description, I wouldn't say rats have any relation to those. Based on there own "documentation" and rules, it sounds to me, like I haven't done anything wrong.

They tried telling me that my rats were undomesticated, and not okay too have.

I pointed out how I felt, to the president, and he stated that it's open to interpretation, and that if I really wanted to fight it, my only option was to go to the board meeting on the 17th, and then the 4-5 board members would decide. I asked him if I did that if he honestly thought I'd have a chance, and his words were "Probably not, but it's your only option."

I then asked him to tell me what he suggested, and his suggestions were" "Either abandon them, or find a friend, who doesn't live in the neighborhood, to take them"

After this, I'd had enough - I then proceeded to the office of the person who sent me the letter (A local management service.) In the office, I was in tears, because I just couldn't believe this was happening to me. The management lady was nice enough to get me a tissue, but then proceeded to have me follow her into some type of conference room, where I had to discuss my personal situation, with the doors open, for the entire office to hear.

She told me that she was informed by "informants" that I had rats. It's funny, because I had spoken to the president of the board today, and had confirmed to me that it was a specific woman in our neighborhood. The president later back-tracked what he said. He first said that it was her, and then later, when I threatened to call the police he changed it, stating "I don't even know if it was her."
For personal reasons, we'll just call this manager at the office "Sally."

Well, I told Sally that I knew who it was, and then she informed me that the other woman who I was told, brought it up, actually just confirmed that I had rats. She told me the person who actually informed her was a construction manager, who happened to see my rats, and he/she was working on the condos. I told her that made no sense, and then she told me, the construction worker had saw them across the lake. I told her that was funny, because I lived on the other side of the neighborhood, and that my home could not be seen from the lake. She told me that "said woman" must have seen it some other way then, and I continued to tell her that my yard was fenced in by bushes, and that my back yard (Which is the only place you would have been able to see the rats on my back lanai) was the only place where you could possibly see into my porch enclosure. I then asked her if her consrtruction manager had permission to trespass in my yard, and she just said no.

So really, she's admitted to me that she knows somebody has been trespassing on my property - How nice, right?! What a great management service!

She then told me that the only thing I could do was either get rid of my rats somehow, or put together some type of proof - She told me to have animals services come in, and give me some type of documentation stating that it's okay to have my pet rats, and then she told me to also go to the pet stores, and have them give me some type of documentation, stating that rats are common household pets, and that they sell them at there location.

She told me if I did that, then the board would re-consider, and go over my "case." If the board agreed that my rats were okay, then I would be allowed to keep them. She told me not to get ahead of myself, and to just follow these steps first, to see if everything was okay. I asked her, what if the board didn't agree, and she told me then I would need to get rid of them, or get a lawyer.

So after I left, I was so upset. I was in hysterics crying.
I went straight to the police department in Bonita, and I talked to the clerk at the window, and then called a number, and talked to a desk officer. The desk officer, was actually laughing, because she thought it was absolutely ridiculous - She told me that they can't tell me what I can, and cannot have in my home, and that based on the wording in the "documents" it stated nowhere, that I could not keep rats as pets.

After that I went home and talked to a few of my close friends in the neighborhood, and everyone I've talked to, agrees with me that they have no ground.

I tried calling a lawyer, but most of the offices were closed by that time. Monday I also plan on calling animal services, to see what they suggest.

I don't really have a problem with animal services coming in and inspecting if that's what's needed to be done, but I shouldn't be forced to have to do this! This is our home, and it's just not fair!

We don't really have tons of extra money to put into getting a lawyer, so I am trying to start a campaign for help on Indiegogo as well. (I canceled the campaign, as I am no longer in need of a lawyer) I have never had the need for a lawyer, and I have no idea about the amount of money needed, but I feel like I need to fight this. I'm being bullied, threatened, and harassed into pretty much throwing away part of my family.

It's not a big secret that I've had a lot of personal issues and demons in my life. Dealing with depression and BiPolar2 disorder are a daily struggle - I weaned myself off of everything, to try and deal with life issues on a better basis, where I do not need to rely on medicine to keep me happy. Right now though, I'm really not handling this well - My grandma who has handled my grandpas passing well this past year, has really kept strong, but she is still grieving, and she's even more upset than I am. She's been telling me that if they're saying this, then they have to go. Not because she doesn't want the rats, but because she can't handle the additional stress being put on her by these monsters.

I try to never ask anything of anyone, but right now, I am desperate, and scared. I can't lose my rats. I mean honestly, if I lost them, I'd just feel empty. Even tonight, I have so much to do, but I'm the type of person who shuts down in stressful situations. I haven't eaten, I haven't showered, and I can't even think straight.

I am asking you all to help me in the biggest way right now. I don't want to take anything from anybody, but I'm desperate, and need help. Even if all you can do is share this story with someone - Email, Tweet, share it on Facebook, anything, I would be forever grateful.

Right now, I just need support knowing that I am doing the right thing, that I should follow through with this, and that I need to fight and stay strong. I'm so vulnerable right now, and I really, am almost at a loss for words. All I keep repeating to myself is how this all went down today. It makes me sick to my stomach.

Thank you all for reading this - I know it's a lot, and I really hope you can all understand where I am coming from. Even if you can't help in any way, I just want you all to know that I care about every single one of you. You guys don't realize how much your kind words effect me positively when I'm struggling.

I love you guys, and I am always here for you too if you need support.

About Me

Hi there! My name's Amanda. I'm 26, I have a 14 month old daughter Millie, and a 3 month old son, Andrew, and I live with the love of my life, Luke, in Southwest Florida.
I've gone through struggles. I've done a few things, and honestly I'm just exploring. I don't know what my goal in life is, besides being happy.
I enjoy going outside. I love photography (Nikon D7100.) I have a huge passion for animals, and wildlife - And I just love doing new things!
I just can't wait to see where life takes me.