Stan Lee reveals which Marvel superhero has the best penis

Stan Lee gave a decidedly Stan Lee-esque interview to Vanity Fair, and as you’d expect, it’s a goldmine of inimitable Stan Lee magic. Stuff like jokingly sharing how he asks his wife for lunch—“By the shades of the shadowy Serapeum, will you please make me a sandwich?!”—avowing, “I don’t intend to die,” pinpointing his secret to creating memorable comic-book characters (“Obviously you don’t want to write something that’s been done already, so you think of something that hasn’t been done”), and proudly declaring, “I’ve always been a hack writer.” Lee also weighs in on the troubled Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark, whose only problem, as he sees it, is that “I’m not sure how the show can succeed without a cameo from me.” And while all of this makes for a good read, perhaps the most salient information that can be gleaned here is only the most pressing comics-related question in the entire Marvel universe:

VF: In the Kevin Smith movie Mallrats, Jason Lee asked you a question that has crossed every serious comic fan’s mind at least once in his life. You dismissed it at the time, calling it a “superhero secret.” Are you finally ready to answer Lee’s question?

Stan Lee: Remind me.

VF: "Is the Thing’s dork made out of orange rock like the rest of his body?”

Stan Lee: I never gave it a thought. I guess common sense would say it was made of orange rock too, but I always thought it was more interesting to think about Reed Richards. As you know, he had the ability to stretch, and sexually, that would seem to be a great asset in many areas.