considering seeing a psycologist for personal counselingperhaps I'll start with a book.I "think" I just need a strong catalyst and support. The support is in place

Mental health is a seriously overlooked part of, well, total health. I've had quite a few experiences with counselling, the majority of which have been very positive, even if it's just affirming what I already know. Taking charge of my own mental health and the mental health of my family was one of the best things I've ever done.

_________________don't you know there ain't no devil that's just god when he's drunk

Sometimes I think ego is one of the biggest obstacles to getting strong. ... The best exercises are humbling. Most people hate that. They'd rather do quarter squats at 225 lbs from day one than learn to squat properly with an empty bar, and ultimately this ends up holding them back.

I've been off for a few days, vegetating. It's been good - also moved into a new house on friday/saturday and don't have internet set up yet.

The competition was amazing. I'm going to do a write up with videos but I don't have the videos yet, it'll probably next week I have them. Have all lifts recorded.

I was aiming for a 500KG total and I got it. I weighed in at 79KG, lightest i've been in years.

I freaked out during my second attempt squat with 160KG. Got too excited. I lost some tightness on the way down and had to wrestle with it to get it up, I thought it was too high and just lost my cool, racked it before the command. Turns out it was deep enough and if I waited for the command I would of got it. It felt like I could of done 5-6 reps when I got it in the third. So instead of going for a 220 deadlift on my third attempt, as planned, I went for 230 and got it.

So the plan going in was 500 with 170, 110, 220 and 9/9 good lifts. I got 500 with 160, 110, 230, and 8/9 good lifts. The plan was also to feel like I had more in the tank and I definitely do, on every lift especially squat and bench.

My client turned training partner got 3 "open" records, 8/9 lifts, and a 305KG total. `110 squat, 55 bench, 140 deadlift. Had more on every lift! She go a no lift on 60KG bench for pressing before the command but the weight was easy - she actually paused it a couple of inches off the chest when she realised she had skipped the command, and still locked it out.

I got 3rd in a class of 9 (or 10, can't remember). 6th over all out of 18 male lifters, most of which had experience - one came 13th in the IPF worlds at the end of last year. I never expected to place as high.

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