"The more of these i drink, the less repulsive you look"
"Your very good looking.. well considering the car crash and stuff"
"Tell you what.. im in a giving mood, you me, your mates right now for some loving. Im waiting for my taxi though.. so lets make it all about me"

Insults

"Yur Maws Got Claws an she's clawin it mah bawz"
"Ah Hud Yer Maw"
Throwing a 2p penny at the person you're insulting" Give this to your momma"
Sniffing the air "sniff sniff......do I smell Fish? ....oh no it's just your crusty fanny you stenchy cow"
"No wonder you're so fucking ugly because your brother's your dad"
" At night I buttfuck your mum up the ass and then I make her clean my dick with her tongue before she kisses you goodnight"
Scowling" suck my dick" pointing at your crotch.
Find a girl you don't like and slap her ass real hard then when she turns round say "Oh damn I missed, I thought it was your face"

No longer playing World of Warcraft. Goodbye fond memories
FUCK THE ALLIANCE

bwahahahah

I didn't read all that, you write too much/I'm lazy/ a combination of the two

But drunk out in the sticks stories are great!!

New Years eve... about 4 years ago I guess, Garristown '5 miles from anything resembling civilisation'

We get a lift the mile up to the village and go to one of the 2 pubs, there's 2 pubs a shop a police station that's always empty and a butchers... that's the village.

The night goes as normal... people get really pissed...

Being that the village is miles from everything closing time is when the police sergeant leaves the bar... seriously

So midnight has passed and the drinks are still flowing, 1 o clock no change... after a while most of us decide to leave (pints in hand), my mate Wayne says 'I'll follow you in a minute' as it happens my folks moved to the tiny village where his family come from...

We wait a little while... not long, it's cold and most of our beer is back in the house and he doesn't appear... Mile long walk in the cold and in for more beer!

an hour or so later, door bell rings... Bop is at the door covered in mud!!

Bops story 'on the way home, the ditch jumped up to get me, but I threw a few digs and got away!'

I fucked him in the shower fully clothed and gave him a pair of shorts to wear

Dopey bastard

DROC

"You've got a lot of opinions for someone who's not on there!"
Michael Bisping
"Showed a lot of grit" - Ian Butlin