Surviving Testicular Cancer

Three Men Who Beat Testicular Cancer Tell Us How The Battle Changed Them

At some point in the history of man, we got the funny idea that testicles were the source of courage or manliness. You hear it all the time. When a man shows his mettle, the stock response from other men looks something like this:

Unfortunately, that’s complete and utter bollocks. Even if we’re excluding women for a moment – and I’m fairly certain Amelia Earhart, for example, wasn’t exactly gifted in the goolies department – surely one of the toughest things a man can endure is the loss of his testicles.

It probably hasn’t escaped your attention that it’s Movember again. The charity has broadened its scope in recent years to raise awareness for all aspects of male health, both physical and mental, but it all started with your bollocks.

Testicular cancer is rare (it accounts for 1% of all cancers in men), but the number of men diagnosed has doubled in the past 50 years. Those of us aged 25-49 are most at risk and by the time you finish work today, an average of six men in this country will have been given some very bad news.

We spoke to three guys who once had that miserable conversation with a doctor. Below they tell us how they reacted, how they coped and how, when it comes to beating cancer, it doesn’t take balls. It takes something much stronger.

It’s something I’m proud of now, like a war wound or a shark bite

Name Darren MorganAge 40Occupation Police officer

When did you first realise there was a problem?
Two years before I was diagnosed. I went to the doctor and he sort of turned me away saying there was an inflammation. I walked out of there thinking I was Rocky. Two years later, I came back from South Africa, got off the plane and couldn’t walk straight. It wasn’t painful, just like a dull ache but I was physically, uncontrollably sick.

What was the prognosis?
I remember seeing the doctor and he examined me like he did the last time and he just knew, you could see by his face. He went a pale sort of colour, which frightened me. I can remember beads of sweat on his forehead. It was 5th June. I was 30.

I went into hospital and it’s not the most graceful thing when you’ve got to pull your pants down in front of two nurses, but they were really caring and open. It was the sort of lump that was integrated within the testicles, it wasn’t protruding. If you imagine an egg, it was like the top third of the egg was solid.

Who did you tell first?
I think it may have been my mother, or my wife at the time, but I’m not sure. I can’t really remember because my state of mind deteriorated quite a bit. I went into pure depression and panic attacks, anxiety. I struggled to cope with the whole issue. Physically, I was probably the fittest I’ve ever been in my life. I was playing semi-professional rugby.

You change into somebody else. You’re a bit robotic in what you do. You’ll have conversations and you’ll walk round the corner and you’ll have forgotten what you’ve talked about. It totally takes over your persona and the person you are. The only way I can describe it is like a robot. Like, answering questions to be polite but you’re constantly in a state of panic and anxiousness and not knowing what’s going to happen.

Can you describe your treatment?
Obviously, I had to have the testicle removed, which was obviously a horrible time. They offered me a prosthetic, which I refused. It’s just a scar at the end of the day to remind you of what you’ve been through – that’s my opinion anyway. To be honest, it’s something I’m proud of now. It’s like a war wound or a shark bite, haha.

I was told that, for testicular cancer, it was the most aggressive of its kind. We put a plan together to deal with it: a single blast of chemo and then regular check-ups.

Where did you find support?
My consultant was amazing, and you have an annual MOT which gives you peace of mind and keeps you positive. You also go through different programmes that are really beneficial. Part of it is cognitive behavioral therapy – what your mind is telling you. Your mind has a massive control over your body and it makes you realise how much control it does have from day to day life.

What was the hardest thing you dealt with?
My son would have been 5 and my daughter would have been 4. They didn’t really understand the severity of it. You can imagine what goes through your mind when you hear you’ve got cancer and you’re a parent. When they’re born you want to make sure they’re secure for the rest of their life. Every worst fear goes through your mind – not seeing their next birthday, things like that.

What lasting changes did cancer make to your life?
I couldn’t put it into words, I’m just a totally different person. Things broke down at home, I got a divorce and concentrated on my kids and still do to this day. That’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made: since the cancer, I just try and have a positive impact on people’s lives.

How do you feel about it now, looking back having survived?
I’m very open about it. Some people get uncomfortable and they ask me, “How can you talk about it so easily?” Part of coming out of the depressed and anxious state is wanting to talk about it in a positive light and just offer reassurance to other people. Yeah, you have the banter – you’re referred to as ‘one ball’... I’ve had problems with hormone balance and testosterone, too. But on the other side, boys at work or at rugby have gone to check themselves and if they’ve got a lump they’ll jump on the phone and ask me about it. I couldn’t tell you how many people have come to me with concerns about it.

What advice do you have for other men?
If I could go back to the first time I went to the doctor, I would have asked for a scan, X-ray, blood tests, everything. It would have probably brought the diagnosis forward two years. I’m lucky that during those two years it didn’t spread. Never take one doctor’s judgement if you’re unsure. That’s what I wish I’d done.

Chemotherapy was by far the hardest thing I have ever done

Name Ben BowersAge 36Occupation Innovation lead, Movember Foundation

When did you first realise there was a problem?
When I was 26 I was sat at my desk and over the course of a few days I felt some discomfort in testicles when sitting down. Over a few days the discomfort turned to subtle then mild pain. One evening I checked my testicles at home and found a lump. I then looked online to see what the cause may be. Unable to discount cancer, this prompted me to go and see my GP. This was uncharacteristic but the mere mention of cancer was enough to make me act. My GP found the lump and referred me for an ultrasound to get an accurate diagnosis of the cause.

Who did you tell first?
After I’d seen the specialist who had given me the news, booked me in for surgery a few days later and sent me for some blood tests, I rode my motorcycle back to my dad’s house and told him what had happened. Well, I actually broke down in his arms and eventually managed to actually vocalise what I had been told.

Can you describe your treatment?
This is where the story gets a little complicated. I’ve actually had TC twice now. The first treatment was very straight forward. I had my right testicle removed under general anaesthetic. Further scans and biopsies showed that the cancer was early stage and had not spread to other parts of my body. From there I went through regular check-ups and monitoring to ensure the cancer did not come back. Once I recovered from the surgery I was back to work and back to normal.

I was diagnosed a second time 3.5 years later with a different, more aggressive form. Unfortunately, this time it had spread. I had my remaining testicle removed then underwent an intensive course of BEP Chemotherapy over the course of four months. This was by far the hardest thing I have ever done. It was physically, mentally and emotionally draining. I was made to feel utterly destroyed in every way. I managed to get through it though and the treatment was successful in killing off the cancer.

How did you process that and come to terms with it?
[The first operation] didn’t affect me much, losing a testicle. I retained all the function with one remaining and wasn't bothered about how it looked. I struggled a lot more with a cancer diagnosis as a young man, I think. Going from a feeling of invincibility to seeing your own mortality was difficult and not something I dealt with very well or even acknowledged at the time. Over the last 10 years I’ve struggled a lot with the mental impact of having cancer. I did not realise or understand at the time that I was struggling and this put pressure and stress on those around me. Eventually I reached a crisis point which resulted in a depression and anxiety diagnosis and subsequent treatment.

Where did you find support?
I had support from family and friends, which was great, but I needed more. Once I finally understood that there was a problem and that I needed help I searched hard for support tailored to men like myself. I really struggled to find services for me and was frustrated about how hard it was to get help when I finally reached out for it. I strongly believe that had I received tailored support targeted for young men at an early stage a lot of the struggle I had would not have had such a profound impact or even any impact at all.

What lasting changes did cancer make to your life?
The mental impact lasted for a long time but I feel that’s in the past now and I can identify sooner when I may need some help or I’m starting to struggle again. With no testicles I now have testosterone replacement and will continue to have this for the rest of my life. That has effects on my hormone levels between injections which has taken time to understand and identify. It can be frustrating and difficult to understand but ultimately it’s a small price to pay for my life.

How do you feel about it now, looking back?
I feel lucky to have survived and [be] in a good place now. Of course I wish it had never happened but given the past 10 years, I feel I am now in a great place in my life. I am also able to work for the Movember Foundation now and share my story and support other men who have been through or are going through testicular cancer. To be able to help these guys and spread the word far and wide is an amazing opportunity and personally something I’m very proud to be part of.

What advice do you have for other men?
Check you testicles at least once a month. Early diagnosis is absolutely key to good outcomes. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or show weakness. If I’d been more open about how I was doing I would not have struggled through the last 10 years like I did. Learning to be open about my feelings, worries and fears has helped me deal with them so much better. It’s made me more of a man as I’ve taken responsibility for my health.

I’m glad it happened ... it made me a better person

Name Bobby BansalAge 35Occupation Sales finance specialist

When did you first realise there was a problem?
I had a double puncture on my bicycle when riding to work one morning, and as a result I bruised both of my testicles quite noticeably. After a couple of days one had reduced in swelling, but the other hadn't, so I went to see a nurse. She told me to take some anti-inflammatory medication and come back if the swelling hadn't reduced in two days. It didn't, and I duly went back and was examined by a doctor, who asked me to have an ultrasound scan as soon as possible through my employer’s private medical insurance. As a result I ended up having a scan that evening.

What was the prognosis?
After the scan I met with a urologist who informed me that I did in fact have a tumour and that surgery would be required to remove it to allow for a biopsy to confirm if it was cancerous. He also told me that he would be performing the surgery and that I would need to see an oncologist to determine if chemo was required.

Who did you tell first?
I was with my partner at the time, and she would be the only one that I would have wanted to discuss this with.

Can you describe your treatment?
I had the surgery seven days after my diagnosis, and once I'd healed (about two to three months later) I had a round of carboplatin chemotherapy. This was at the recommendation of my oncologist after examining my biopsy results and the size of my tumour – 5cms at its largest point. The alternative was for me to have monthly rather than three monthly check ups for the first 12 months.

How did you process everything and come to terms with it?
I didn't really have an issue with the fact that it was going to be removed, more so that it had a tumour in it! To be honest I made a joke of it; how my balance would be affected and how I would no longer be able to swear in the plural, only the singular!

The real difficulty came with the waiting between the surgery and the chemo, and then between the chemo and each of the subsequent follow ups. There was a worry that the cancer would come back, and a worry about other side effects from the chemo such as haemorrhoids. There was also a need for testosterone replacement, and it has taken about nine months to get the dosage and subsequent effects right.

Where did you find support?
I found it from my partner, and talking about it with everyone, a lot, to the point that people were embarrassed because I was so honest about it all. I didn't (and still don't) care; it's an important issue and I feel that people don't need to skirt around it. I also found a great deal of support through a Facebook messenger group of similar 'one-offs'. In addition, I've been exceptionally fortunate to have a great oncologist, urologist, GPs, nurses and various other medical professionals around me.

What lasting changes did cancer make to your life?
It's made me appreciate things a lot more in my life: my partner, my career, my health, and the realisation that I am more than capable of bouncing back from something like this.

How do you feel about it now, looking back having survived?
Glad it happened – it sounds like it cannot be true but it has made me a much better person. I've learnt an awful lot about myself and also how much I value my better half.

What advice do you have for other men?
If in any kind of doubt, get it checked out! Don't wait – a couple of weeks could make the difference between a close-call and a real headache of chemo cycles. I also couldn't recommend more talking about what's going on in your head with someone, because that's probably as big a barrier as anybody can have in terms of seeking help.

To donate to the Movember Foundation or get more information on male health issues, visit Movember.com