Q: What does it mean when a guy goes mentally numb and has an “out-of-body” experience of sorts during sex? In the few times we have had sex, the guy I’m trying to be with has mentioned this happening. He says it is the best feeling in the world but also kind of scary, and that he has had this feeling only one other time out of all the relationships he has had. He told me not to worry about the issue.

Is the “numbing” linked to nothing more than sex or is it safe to say that feelings, such as love, can be involved in this sensation?

Dr. Pepper Schwartz: I am confused because the words “numbing” and “out-of-body” seem sort of contradictory. Let us just say he goes into some “strange zone” when he has an orgasm or is extremely excited. I see nothing wrong with that as long as you feel it is happening because of pleasure rather than some other disturbing emotion.

And of course, it is not a problem as long as you don’t worry, don’t feel used in any way, but instead can participate in and enjoy his extreme reaction.