Biography

My version of dancing has been called "stunning". I am capable of unspeakable rationality, a dizzying array of facial expressions, not being so emotionally detached, social anxiety, an iconoclastic disposition, playful mischief, moments of complete silence, and displaying the illusion of pretension. I encourage rocking in all forms; if you play the guitar (I don't), now would be a good time to bust out a really sweet riff. I enjoy pillow forts and sweaty make out sessions, baseball and Guinness, time travel and eating foods that have passed their expiration dates.

I am married to a super hot Federal attorney, am the stepmother to a thirteen-year-old baseball star and champion of type one diabetes, and am the mother to a four-year-old future supermodel. The latter is the boss because he walks in on people in the bathroom and refuses to leave.