As always, it’s two bucks at the door and you bring your own towel. Shoes are complementary. Contrary to popular belief, exclamation points are allowed. They’re just discouraged!

If you throw up in anything except the toilet or the rabbit hole, you can kiss your next invitation goodbye. And remember, no matter what you hear, we do accept the Irish. We just ask that they dye their hair before knocking on the door. Have a safe stay.