If Only It's Like Choosing the Shoes...

This morning, I was stuck between 2 shoes. The 3 cm heel bronze, or the 7 cm black. And it often happens.

Paradox of Choice. This is a term that has been playing in my head, putting me into recognition of how life talks, sometimes in funny way. I discovered the term when I was feeling sleepy in between my internet-based TOEFL exam in Jakarta almost half a year ago. You who have red Barry Schwartz’s analysis long before me might be laughing at my belated knowing. But really, the idea of the paradox captured my mind so much that I could not move my mind frame to the next readings of the exam.

How he talked about having more means less, how choices sometimes make you fall into confusion, hesitation and difficulties. Like if you had to choose jeans trousers 30 years ago, you just had one style available at the stores. But now, we are spoiled by the fashion terms and cuts. Jeans now can be made of from soft or stretched fabrics. It can be in dark blue washed color, bright blue, black, white, and so on. It can be in the form of booty cut, baggie, straight cut... and let alone the shape of the pocket, the embroidery or other ornaments. Oh. Forgive me if I didn’t say the types and cuts in standardized fashion terms. Confirmed: I’m a humanitarian worker, not a fashion editor...

You, who are not a fashionista would scream the “Aaaaarrrggggghhhh….!!!” To see how life can be so complicated even when it deals with the used-to-be-worker pants!

See how life is like a wheel? Even for a single jeans pant!

Well, let’s leave the jeans’ case now. Aim the lens closer to life. How many choices can we have in a day, and how many minutes that we need to spend to make choices within a simple case?

I remember that some weeks ago, even in a niche organic store that I thought wouldn’t give too much options I was hesitated in between choices of pasta. Yes, pasta! It took me at least 3 minutes to read the ingredients, observed the shapes and imagined into which meal I could develop them to be something normal and eatable then shared my idea with my Beebee who was a little faster in deciding his choice, as many most of other men are.

How many times in a week, you hesitated between short cuts, and how many stories we heard about a girl making bad choice among some choices of the seem-to-be-Mr. Right?

In another way, one day when you feel stuck of your life, you wish that you would have more options; of career, of a better boyfriend, of a better place to live, a holiday, more beautiful teeth, taller or slimmer body. Some choices in your head might be serious, but it can also be as dreadful as the desire not to have obligation to behave during your first dinner with your fiancé’s family. (for those who has never been in this complication, you are blessed).

In another day, the paradox of choice might hit you. Imagine (or maybe it’s already true) that you are bright, you are gorgeous, you are known as a very good worker, you are nice, and almost at the same time you apply for 3 scholarship scheme, all of them gave you positive replies, plus you are offered one position in your headquarter, plus, seems that those are not enough, you are proposed to have your own radio or TV show, all at the same time, all in a capital city, but you have a great, handsome, athletic, smart, kind, gentle, witty boyfriend who can cook, plays guitar, teach you to swim, but at the same time he is so fun to hang out with. He is the man you have been longing for almost all the half of your life… but he is living 1500 kilometers away?

When it is the case, the question is not about how long would it take to get you in a decision, but how would you live with your decision made you feel down in between overwhelmed rush in your brain.

If you have only half of the condition, which doesn’t intersect to the paradox, you’ll be jumping, screaming for happiness. But no, no, no. Too less people on this earth huge has the privilege to always live something for granted!

So, wouldn’t you wish that it would feel the same as buying all the shoes that you like instead of spending time thinking of which one will you choose?

But friends, life is not like that, and we all know that. We are built with mind that can mend the pain. We are built from the cells that must die then being replaced. We are living in the universe that bears the curse and the gifts of being round and moving in circles. All the new will be in the same, or similar shapes, no matter how bad the process was.

Will paradox of choices created abnormality?

Like cells that can’t grow because it caught the viruses that modify the shapes?

After all, I think, when we are too drawn into the depth of the paradox and begin to feel the pain of it, and we have no power to move anything, or we feel frozen in between the choices, to whom will you ask for a guidance? ... only your heart can answer it...

I am not complaining, not at all. I am a believer who believes that having choices is the beautiful consequence of having the brain, mind, and thoughts. From shoes that you'll wear, to your life survival.