*sheepishly raises her hand* I'm sorry, Ms_Cellany, but I don't quite get this one.....

It's a joke on vector mathematics. Vectors have both magnitude and direction. (Winds are vectors, for instance: 5 mph north, 20 mph west). In a "cross" operation, you take the absolute value (magnitude) of each vector times the sine of the angle between them.

The symbol for absolute value is two vertical lines, which i don't have on my keyboard.

For the wind example, it would be /5/*/20/*sin(90)

A regular old number is called a scalar, and can't be used in this type of equation. Which leads to the next joke: "What do you get when you cross an elephant with a mountain climber? Nothing. A mountain climber is a scaler."

Twas the night o' the last supper, it was, an Jaysus is sittin' round the table wit' all the disciples around him. His face is sad, and he turns to Payter, and "Payter," he sez, "I'm hearin' that one of yez will be betrayin' me this night. Could it be you?" Payter, he sez,

"Oh never, Jaysus, I'd never be doin' such a t'ing!" So Jaysus, he asks all around to everybody, and they're all tellin' him the same as Payter. There's not a one as would ever betray him. Jaysus, he finally gets to Judas, and he's askin' him, "Judas, me bhoy, be tellin' me it's not you!" and Judas, he sez,

"Why, old man, whatever makes you think that?"

Logged

If you have an opinion about my life, raise your hand!Now, put it over your mouth.

A husband and wife are having an argument over who has to make the coffee in the morning. Neither of them wants to do it, so, being Christians, they decide to consult the Bible, and agree that they will abide by whatever it says.

So they spend a few minutes poring over their Bibles, and finally, the wife calls out: "Aha! It says right here in the Bible that the man is supposed to make the coffee!"

Her husband, is of course, skeptical, and asks her where she found that.

She points to her Bible, and says: "Right here. See, it says 'He brews.'"

A husband and wife are having an argument over who has to make the coffee in the morning. Neither of them wants to do it, so, being Christians, they decide to consult the Bible, and agree that they will abide by whatever it says.

So they spend a few minutes poring over their Bibles, and finally, the wife calls out: "Aha! It says right here in the Bible that the man is supposed to make the coffee!"

Her husband, is of course, skeptical, and asks her where she found that.

She points to her Bible, and says: "Right here. See, it says 'He brews.'"

I think we've gone from stumpers to groaners

Logged

"I don't mean to be rude", he began, in a tone that threatened rudeness in every syllable.

Twas the night o' the last supper, it was, an Jaysus is sittin' round the table wit' all the disciples around him. His face is sad, and he turns to Payter, and "Payter," he sez, "I'm hearin' that one of yez will be betrayin' me this night. Could it be you?" Payter, he sez,

"Oh never, Jaysus, I'd never be doin' such a t'ing!" So Jaysus, he asks all around to everybody, and they're all tellin' him the same as Payter. There's not a one as would ever betray him. Jaysus, he finally gets to Judas, and he's askin' him, "Judas, me bhoy, be tellin' me it's not you!" and Judas, he sez,

"Why, old man, whatever makes you think that?"

I admit that I don't get it. I see that the "that" is out of character for the accent of everyone else, but that's about it.

Twas the night o' the last supper, it was, an Jaysus is sittin' round the table wit' all the disciples around him. His face is sad, and he turns to Payter, and "Payter," he sez, "I'm hearin' that one of yez will be betrayin' me this night. Could it be you?" Payter, he sez,

"Oh never, Jaysus, I'd never be doin' such a t'ing!" So Jaysus, he asks all around to everybody, and they're all tellin' him the same as Payter. There's not a one as would ever betray him. Jaysus, he finally gets to Judas, and he's askin' him, "Judas, me bhoy, be tellin' me it's not you!" and Judas, he sez,

"Why, old man, whatever makes you think that?"

I admit that I don't get it. I see that the "that" is out of character for the accent of everyone else, but that's about it.

Um...Jesus is God and is omniscient? Other than that, I got nothin'.

Logged

"It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends" - Harry Potter

Twas the night o' the last supper, it was, an Jaysus is sittin' round the table wit' all the disciples around him. His face is sad, and he turns to Payter, and "Payter," he sez, "I'm hearin' that one of yez will be betrayin' me this night. Could it be you?" Payter, he sez,

"Oh never, Jaysus, I'd never be doin' such a t'ing!" So Jaysus, he asks all around to everybody, and they're all tellin' him the same as Payter. There's not a one as would ever betray him. Jaysus, he finally gets to Judas, and he's askin' him, "Judas, me bhoy, be tellin' me it's not you!" and Judas, he sez,

"Why, old man, whatever makes you think that?"

I admit that I don't get it. I see that the "that" is out of character for the accent of everyone else, but that's about it.

Um...Jesus is God and is omniscient? Other than that, I got nothin'.

I interpreted it as Jesus is Irish, and so is 'Payter' and presumably the other disciples, but then when he gets to Judas Judas has an upper class English accent ('old man' and all that). So an Irish-English joke.

Twas the night o' the last supper, it was, an Jaysus is sittin' round the table wit' all the disciples around him. His face is sad, and he turns to Payter, and "Payter," he sez, "I'm hearin' that one of yez will be betrayin' me this night. Could it be you?" Payter, he sez,

"Oh never, Jaysus, I'd never be doin' such a t'ing!" So Jaysus, he asks all around to everybody, and they're all tellin' him the same as Payter. There's not a one as would ever betray him. Jaysus, he finally gets to Judas, and he's askin' him, "Judas, me bhoy, be tellin' me it's not you!" and Judas, he sez,

"Why, old man, whatever makes you think that?"

I admit that I don't get it. I see that the "that" is out of character for the accent of everyone else, but that's about it.

Um...Jesus is God and is omniscient? Other than that, I got nothin'.

I interpreted it as Jesus is Irish, and so is 'Payter' and presumably the other disciples, but then when he gets to Judas Judas has an upper class English accent ('old man' and all that). So an Irish-English joke.

Ah! I knew it had something to do with the accents, I just couldn't figure out it. Thank you!

Tim walks into the doctors office and tells the receptionist, "ma'am I've got the shingles." she says "okay we will get you in with the doctor as soon as possible." So Tim sits in the waiting room until he gets called back. Finally the nurse comes out and asks him "what are we doing for you today?" Tim responds "ma'am I've got the shingles." the nurse says "oh no we will get your vitals started and the doctor will be in" and she leaves sending in a second nurse. The second nurse asks Tim again what they are seeing him for and he again responds "ma'am I've got the shingles." as he finishes his explanation the doctor walks in and Tim tells him "look doc, all I need is to know where to deliver your shingles."

Logged

‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing’ attributed to Edmund Burke 1729-1797