Gwyneth Paltrow’s New Travel App Is Exactly What You’d Expect From A Gwyneth Paltrow Travel App

Gwyneth Paltrow, conscious uncoupler and recent purveyor of 15-thousand dollar sexual products, has stepped out with an exciting new venture. The woman who’s done it all — from winning an Oscar, to naming a child after a fruit, to running a luxury lifestyle site with a weird name — has just launched herself into the travel app game. Paltrow being Paltrow, the app even comes complete with a pearl-clutching name. It’s called G.Spotting.

Sadly, the name — chosen so that your mom has to explain why there’s something so risqué on her phone — is probably the best thing about G.Spotting (it’s a pun, we just got it!). According to Conde Nast Traveler, the app is meant to give you a guide to over 25 cities, letting you know what’s hot, what’s underground, how to get around (spoiler: Uber or rental car; Paltrow doesn’t seem like the public transportation-type), and what to do if you’ve had a medical emergency.

NOTE: That tip is to always call the emergency number for the region you’re in. Of course, if you’re using an app called G.Spotting to tell you what to do while bleeding, you probably have bigger problems.