Painting is one of the things that my kids ask to do but I almost always try to come up with some excuse to get out of it. “Oh we don’t have time, we need to finish homework and baths”, “Ummmm, mommy just cleaned today, can we please paint another day?” or my favorite one “We are all out of paint brushes”. I pray that they will forget all about it for a few weeks and then I can find a new set of excuses. It’s such a hassle for me and not worth it some days. If they do get to paint it means that I am in a really good mood or I just picked up a new box of wine that day! Next to Play-Dough, painting is pretty much the only craft that I despise pulling out of our craft closet. I hate the brushes, the drops of wet paint everywhere and the constant dipping of brushes into water or God forbid into another color. Why on earth would a kid think it was a good idea to mix colors! Okay that’s just my neurotic self talking. I know they are just being creative. But for the past few years I have left the painting to their teachers at school.

But there has to be an easier way, I have tried all sorts of painting products. I like the paint with water books but the kids do not enjoy them as much as I do.

I have never heard of Kwik Stix until they reached out to me. But let me tell you that I absolutely LOVE THEM. I wasn’t sure if the kids would like it as much as their mommy, but they did. Sean and Ben both had a blast painting. They kept drawing pictures of me for some odd reason. Maybe they were just so happy that I let them paint for once in 2015.

Kwik Stix are awesome, clean and there’s virtually NO CLEANUP! They look like the size and shape of a standard glue stick but its paint in there and there’s NO MESS. Did you hear me, no dripping water or paint onto clothes or my floors. You don’t even need a brush, a smock or a bowl of clean water. You just take off the cap then twist it up from the bottom. It’s a very soft texture but it’s not runny or drippy.

The kids had a blast drawing pictures and painting them in. It is also a fast drying paint and has the finish of real paint. They said that it would dry within 90 seconds and that was pretty accurate. The one small bit of paint that Sean got on the counters wiped off easily 1/2 hour later when I finally noticed it. The only downside was that they were a little thick. Sean was working on a project and couldn’t stay in the lines. So it would be great if maybe they had another version with a smaller tip for smaller projects. But other than that they worked great!

I have already let Sean use them twice this week! That’s shocking for me, painting before school on a Tuesday morning. WHAT? I figured why not, there’s no clean-up for me. He just puts the cap back on and viola we are done and I have some pretty cute pictures to hang up.

I would definitely recommend these for kids of all ages. It’s the perfect Christmas gift or stocking stuffer this year. You can find them over at Amazon in a variety of packs. It’s better than a crayon since it works on all types of materials. Sean painted a canvas bag and it even works on wood, cardboard or canvas. I might try a pumpkin later on and see if it sticks onto there! That would save a lot of carving and mess next Halloween! Heck, I even let Owen do some painting with them. He tried to eat them at first but then he got the hang of it after I showed him how they worked.

For the past few years I have been taking the boys to a fun pediatric dentist. They have monkeys and a treehouse and tons of goody bags. Well my insurance company was not too fond of this place and once they turned 6 they stopped covering the kids. It was considered a specialty dentist since its focus was pediatrics. My only other option was my dentist. I wasn’t a huge fan of the office. It felt more like a deli counter where I was just known as ticket number 42. No connection at all with the hygienist or the dentist. Not that I need to bond over coffee and scones but I like to feel comfortable when someone is sticking needles inside my gums and pulling teeth.

Well the time came that I had to start taking the boys there. Ben has been going to the dentist for 4 years now but he has never let them clean/brush his teeth. He can’t stand it. He would let them do X-rays and count or check for cavities but never a real cleaning. Today was the day that he put on his big boy pants and got it done. He was so brave. The X-rays were smooth and the cleaning and plague pick went well. He didn’t like the fluoride treatment but I reminded him that when I was a kid I had to hold a duck shapes piece in my mouth. Now they just brush it on with a toothbrush. Kids have it sooo easy these days. I’m just so glad that the kid got over his fear. It also helped that mom mom bribed him with $10 and a new chapter book. Money talks with this kid. He told me that he is saving up for his own iPhone. He wants to own one so he can charge it by his bed. Since he doesn’t “own” his iPad I won’t let him charge his iPad in his room for obvious reasons (i.e. He will be up all night on the darn thing watching Minecraft videos). So he’s on a mission. I’m sure he will get to $30 and buy a Pokemon box or a Lego set. Kid can’t save at all.

But anyway back to the dentist. I was so proud of him and Sean too. Sean who is always a pro at the dentist was not as easy but he did great too. He kept telling the hygienist fibs. He told her that Ben was his twin brother, that he was 7 not 6 and that everything hurt even when she wasn’t touching his teeth. Little stinker. Again he hated the fluoride treatment but he got through it. $10 and a book were at stake if he didn’t get it done.

The hygienists were awesome and listened to the boys talk endless about Minecraft. The dentist himself was ok. He reminded me of the New Orleans Saints DC Rob Ryan. He was interesting. But he told the boys that their teeth were healthy and that they were both cavity free! Such happy news!

My only complaint was the front desk. When she asked if they were new patients I said yes. She gave a loud sign and was acting rude. I said is there something wrong. She said yes now I have to do work. Ummmm listen lady it’s called a freaking job. Yes you have to do work. It’s called typing the 17 pages of questions into a computer. You’ll live!!! I had to fill out about 50 forms (not even sure what half of them were) but I probably signed over my third kid to their practice for experimental reasons. Sorry Owen!

So thankfully for the first time in over 4 years we had an awesome visit. I really hope that we are over the hump with the dentist fears (well at least until someone has a cavity)

I am finally getting a chance to catch up in all of my posts!!! Sorry for the silence on here over the past few weeks. I’m struggling to get a grip on things lately. So much to balance with the boys and I don’t have much free time anymore. I’ll figure it out one of these days {or I’ll probably just have to wing it for the next 18 years}. So here’s a quick update on some big news about Ben.

A few weeks ago Ben finally lost that first tooth. You know the one that had been loose for about a month or so. He would wiggle it all of the time but it wouldn’t budge. I on the other hand ran out of the room screaming every time that he touched it. Yes, I’ve had 3 c-sections but a loose tooth still makes me queasy and nauseous. And the boy who can’t stand blood or shots had a fun time chasing me around with that wiggly tooth! Little brat!

Well I was praying that it would not fall out when I was home alone with the kids. I know I am a wimp and thankfully the tooth fell out at school. When I brushed his teeth that morning, I could see that it was pretty much out of his gums. He wiggled it but it didn’t fall out. I knew it wasn’t going to make it through the day. And I was right. When be got off the bus in the afternoon he came running off screaming that he finally lost it. He told me that when he was getting off the bus that morning his friend said that his mouth was bleeding. When he showed his teacher she used a tissue and I think it just fell out after one little wiggle. His new tooth was already sitting back there waiting! And you can see that he has another tooth back there too. It’s just waiting for his space up front!

They put his tooth in the cutest little tooth box. He was so excited.

He couldn’t wait to write his note to the tooth fairy. The kid begged for $20 but the tooth fairy just couldn’t do it. He did get $10 for his first tooth (and the tooth fairy promised me that it was going to be a lot less for every tooth after). He was set in $20 because he wanted to buy this box of Pokemon cards from Target.

Here’s his note! Good luck trying to figure out what it says. I will translate it for you:

Dear Tooth Fairy,

Leave me twenty dollars. My tooth is in the pillow.

Look down and you can take my tooth out and open the box.

Love,

Ben

When he woke up he was pretty angry that the tooth fairy didn’t leave him the $20.Thankfully after a long talk about earning money and saving it, he put his $10 in his wallet for later. We went to Target the next day to buy those Pokemon cards! He forgot that he had another $10 in his wallet from doing some chores around the house! He was a happy camper!

We have two more loose teeth but I think that they are going to be staying put for awhile! He is still biting into apples with no issues. Ewww gross!!!!

I have always wanted to start the tradition of family game night. Right now it’s very hard to do with the baby, Joey’s work schedule and homework. But I know that soon we will pick a night that works best and start our “official” game night. But we do try and squeeze in games every now and again to pass the time on a rainy day or just for fun. The kids discovered UNO this fall and have been obsessed with it ever since. I remember playing it as a young kid and I love that my boys are enjoying the same games!

A few weeks ago I received a box from Gamesformotion filled with a stack of familiar games. But there was a twist. These games had their pieces and tiles replaced with some very yummy Belgium chocolate! Yup that’s right, I said CHOCOLATE! Now we can play Candy Land, Scrabble, Battleship and many other games with actual pieces of chocolate. The rules of the games have been modified a bit but nothing too confusing and who cares, you are playing with chocolate!

I finally had the perfect time to break open Candy Lane and play it with the boys. Of course it was a huge hit. The boys had a blast playing. Candy Land is already a great game but it’s even better with chocolate. Yummy! Sean won the big 1st Place medal (made out of chocolate of course). But he ate it before I could get a picture of it! Sneaky Kid!

Guess Who? Is next on our list to play.

All games will be available for purchase at mass retail stores such as Target, CVS, at select SuperValu store locations, Kmart, Amazon.com, Meijer and Fred Meyer, Bed Bath & Beyond and select smaller distributors with retail prices starting at only $9.99.

I was in Target this past weekend and found a display in the Christmas section. I would have snapped a cute photo but my phone was dead! So keep an eye out for these fun {and delicious} games! They are the perfect gift this holiday season! But you really don’t need to wait. Enjoy them today.

I did not receive compensation for this review but I did receive sample products from Gamesformotion. All of the opinions stated above are my own.

I don’t even know how I am typing this post right now since my eyes are being held open by toothpicks. It was another sleepless night in our house. I don’t know how I created three children that do not like to sleep. Owen has been a handful lately and not sleeping or napping on schedule (even off schedule he’s not napping) it started before daylight savings time but did get worse after. Owen is 11 months now but he’s still waking up 1-3 times a night. I try to let him cry it out but he can’t figure out the self soothing thing and just screams forever (or in Sean’s words he screams for infinity). So after what seems like forever I cave and feed him. Oh and now he’s started soaking through his diapers at night so I have to start buying overnight ones. I’m tired of changing pajamas and sheets at 3am.

So the other day Owen decided that after a 1:00 am wakeup call he would get up for the day at 3:45 am. So yes I spent all day home with the 3 boys on about 3 hours of sleep. I went to bed around 11:00 pm but was up from 1:00-2:00 am with Owen (I cannot fall right back to sleep after feeding and changing him). Then he woke me up again at 3:45am. The other two boys were up pretty early too. They didn’t have school yesterday or today because of the NJ teacher conferences. It was raining all day out so the boys were restless and fighting NON-STOP. I tried entertaining with Legos, games of UNO, iPads and of course Christmas movies. Nothing could contain their behavior. The morning wasn’t bad but by 11:00 am I was exhausted and moody. Owen finally napped a bit so that helped. I was excited for bedtime. I got the kids to sleep by 7:00 pm. I knew that they would probably be up by 6:00 am but I could handle 6!!! If only it was 6:00 am that everyone woke up for the day!

I tried going to bed myself at 8:00 pm but I had to shower and fold some laundry. I had about 1,000 other things on my to-do list that I had to skip. I gave up even trying. I finally fell asleep around 10:00 pm. But by 1:00 am Owen was awake and ready to rumble. He was soaked again so I had to change him, feed him and deposit him back into his crib. Thankfully he went right back to sleep. But the dreaded 3:45 am arrived and right to the minute he was awake and screaming. I ignored him for awhile but he wouldn’t stop. Joey fed him and changed him. Oh and while this was happening the boys woke up. Yes all 3 kids were wide awake at 4:00 am. Owen finally crashed around 5:00 am but the older boys did not. So I am sitting on my couch right now with two boys who have been up since 4:00 am and one baby who slept until 6:30 am. Thankfully the sun is shining today and Ben has an afternoon play date!!! It should be a less stressful day but not any less tiring! Wonder if I can get them all to take a late morning nap?!

I can’t believe that I have three minutes to sit down and type about my day. It was one of those days where everything starts off bad and then just gets worse. The day that you just want to crawl up into a ball in the corner and cry your eyes out.

It started last night around midnight. I finally fell asleep around 11:30 when a 1/2 hour later I woke up to Sean staring at me. I knew it was coming. He agreed to go to bed earlier without a fight — WHICH NEVER HAPPENS — Oh and he mentioned that he didn’t feel good. So I knew that it was going to be a long night. The kid had a fever. Not too high. around 101. So I gave him some Tylenol and snuggled him. While we were snuggling, Owen woke up. This kid is killing me. He wakes up 2, sometimes 3, times a night. Why on earth have I not produced one child that can sleep more than 4 hours straight. EVER. So I hopped out of Sean’s bed and fed and changed Owen. Thankfully he went right back to sleep … for now! I crawled back into bed with Sean for another 1/2 hour until he FINALLY fell asleep. I slithered out of his room ever so quietly. Back to my bed. WIDE AWAKE. Candy Crush at 1am. Sure, why not. I did make it to the next level. Can someone please advance me to the next level!!

I finally fell asleep around 1:15. Around 3am I hear Owen crying, AGAIN. I just let him cry a bit but it was getting worse so of course I go in and he has soaked his crib. So here it is 3am and I am changing crib sheets, pajamas, mattress covers, etc. FUN TIMES! He wouldn’t go back to sleep either. He was up until 4am. That’s when I finally fell asleep too. Then wake up time was around 6:30. Sean couldn’t go to school because of his fever and he was not happy. He was fine when he woke up but I had to follow the 24 hour rule!!! Ugh those damn middle of the night fevers. If I can just train my kids to not wake me up then I will never know about it… and they can go to school. I kid, I kid. So Owen, Sean and I planned our day sitting on the couch watching Jesse on Netflix. That is until Ben woke up and reminded Sean that he was going to buy lunch for the first time at school today. Sean started crying and it all went downhill from there.

We finally got Ben on the bus and ran to Shop Rite real quick for some milk.

The rest of the morning went smoothly. Sean watch Jesse on Netflix and Owen took a nice 2 hour nap! I wanted to nap too since I didn’t sleep the night before but that wasn’t in the cards! I’ll get some sleep in a few decades! After lunch I thought I would let Sean go outside and burn off some energy. This kid cannot just sit all day watching tv, painting or reading books. He needs to play! So we went on a bike ride to the lake. He was feeling fine and I figured we couldn’t spread too many germs riding bikes.

Well that quiet bike ride turned out to be pretty eventful. If you read my blog or know Sean personally, then you know that the boy gives me a heart attack every day. It’s always something. I can’t believe that I have managed to keep him pretty injury free for so long. Well today almost turned out to be horrific. He was doing well riding his bike and listening to me when I told him to stop for cars, alleys, and streets. Well we had just crossed a big intersection in my neighborhood and we were about to cross another street. I told him to stop because there was a car coming. He was stopped but for some reason he heard “GO” and took off. I started screaming and running and yelling. The car was headed right towards him. I am not lying when I say that I saw both of our lives flash before our eyes. Thank GOD that the car was going somewhat slow and coming out of a roundabout so he was not speeding. The guy was yelling at me, but I didn’t care. He stopped in time and that’s all that mattered. There was about 5 feet between Sean and the car. Sean just kept on going. I was hysterical, screaming, yelling, crying, scared, etc. I told him that he almost got hit. His response was “but I didn’t”. That’s his attitude on anything dangerous. Danger just doesn’t click with him. And that scares me to death.

After all of Town Center heard me screaming, I figured it was time to head straight home. So I picked up my heart off the sidewalk and marched him back home. After a few more time outs and some yelling it was time to get Ben off the bus. That went pretty well.. no fighting, no hitting and noone running into the street. But then we got home. Owen was cranky so I put him down for a short nap. Yeah, that didn’t go so well. The kid screamed and screamed. I finally got him but he proceeded to scream for 2 hours straight. Dinner was burning in the stir fry, Owen was screaming, Sean wanted a snack and Ben had his face in the iPad! I just poured myself a drink and texted Joey to bitch! Ahhh thank goodness it is Friday!

I managed to feed all 3 boys and myself. We headed to the basement where the boys ended the evening with a light saber battle. It all ended well. Sean is fever free and ALIVE, Ben did great on his spelling test today and Owen is finally sleeping!

AHHHH just another day in my life. I am not kidding when I say that this is my life… ON REPEAT!!!! But I wouldn’t trade it for the world {well except for the almost getting run down by a car part}.

Have a great weekend! We have soccer, karate and then NOTHING! We are hoping to go exploring in the woods, carve some pumpkins and play outside all weekend long! Happy Fall!

So Tuesday was a very traumatic day for Ben. He had to get eye drops! Yes, I said that right, eye drops. Poor kid!

As you know Benjamin has worn glasses for about 2 1/2 years now. I don’t recognize him when he doesn’t have them on. They are just a part of him now. And he is so adorable with them.

Well he wears them because at his 4 year check-up we discovered that he had some eye issues. His right eye has a cataract and poor vision. It’s not terrible but because of his cataract he used his left eye a lot and his right eye never strengthened. We tried patching for a year and that didn’t work. So we figured that the boy would just wear glasses going forward. After his last eye appointment his doctor suggested that we meet with a top doc in Philly to confirm that the cataract is “normal”.

On Tuesday Ben, Owen and I drove down to Philly while Sean was in school. I knew that it was going to be a long day so I packed accordingly. Teaching hospitals / doctors offices never move quickly. We learned this from his yearly visits to the NYU Skin Cancer clinic. A 20 minute appointment usually takes several hours because of all the doctors that pop in to check him out.

And because it always happens this way…. the kid with the most medical issues is the one with the most fear/phobias/anxiety. The poor kid is definitely my son. I hate all things medical and I have had multiple skin cancers removed, three c-sections, etc. I tend to have panic/anxiety attacks whenever I am faced with anything medical — even if it’s just something minor. So of course Benjamin is that kid in our family.

The first thing that he asked the doctor was if he would need eye drops? The doctor said maybe {which we all know means yes} and it all went downhill from there. The first doctor did the eye exam, then the second one did his. Now it was time for the drops. Three doctors and one mom {me} had to hold the kid down to get those drops in. But we got them in after a ton of hysterical crying and kicking and screaming. Once they were in we had to wait for his eyes to dilate. A half hour later we were back in the room to visit with another doctor. This is when he got upset all over again. The drops had worked and now his eyes were all blurry. He kept crying to me that he was going blind and he couldn’t see. I felt so bad for the boy. It’s hard to explain that they will wear off in a bit and he can go back to reading his Lego Chima book.

The poor kid was so tired from the long ride, appointment and screaming. He fell asleep for a few minutes while waiting for the final doctor to come in and visit with him.

Finally after three hours (and 3 doctors) we met with the head doctor and he confirmed that his eyes are great. The right one does have a cataract but he was born with it and it hasn’t changed at all. His eye sight is not getting any worse. The risk of any surgery to remove it would not be worth the reward. Meaning it wouldn’t change his vision much {if at all}. So he said that he would NEVER put the boy through the surgery and a few weeks worth of daily drops just to see if it helps his vision. THANK GOD! I would not want to wheel Ben into eye surgery EVER. So despite the drama of the 3 hour visit and drive to/from Philly it turned out to be great news.

Do you ever feel like you are living in the movie Groundhog’s Day? No? Well I feel that my entire life the past year has been the theme of that movie. Day in and day out I go through the exact same thing OVER AND OVER AGAIN! It never changes. Just one day I hope for a change but it never happens. The boys fight all day long, every single day, non-stop. I can’t get it to end! I understand that kids, especially siblings, fight alot but this is getting out of hand.

Why can’t they be more like this:

And less like this:

Yesterday was one of those days that you just want to erase and forget all about. Please tell me that you all have those days. The scary part is, I know that it’s going to happen all over again tomorrow. You know from the moment you wake up until the moment you fall asleep that it’s going to be torture. I thought it was going to be okay because Owen slept all night and only woke up around 5:45 am for the day. Not the best wake up call, but not horrible. Sean was up at 7 am and Ben rolled out of bed around 7:30 am. The morning was fine until Sean started sneaking twizzlers and juice boxes for breakfast! Sorry kid, that’s not what we eat at 7:17 am. So that meltdown woke Ben up a few minutes later. Neither one of them would get dressed for school {shocking!}. It’s so annoying since no one will get dressed or brush their teeth upstairs. Everything is done in the family room and it drives me wild. Well they do brush their teeth in the powder room and not the family room. I just wish that they could take care of this upstairs. I have tried training them hundreds of times, but it never sticks.

So I finally get them all dressed, brushed and packed for school. Then at 8:25am we slam the door, scream at each other and head off to the bus stop. This half block walk consists of Sean darting into the street no less than 3 times before he runs all of the way across the park to the bus stop. Ben was fine on the walk but then all hell broke loose once we hit our corner. The fighting begins. “I was here first!”, “No I was!” AHHHHHHH the daily fight over who is first in line. Then they spend the next few minutes pushing each other into traffic until the bus arrives. I try breaking them up but then I get caught in the line of fire. The pushing and shoving is now directed towards me!!!!!!! I just want to crawl into a hole. I am so embarrassed every morning but I cannot control them at all while I am also holding Owen. I separate them, I scold them, I threaten their existence. Nothing gets through to them. Then after a few choice words the bus shows up and off they go! I think that I actually skip back to the house now that they are in someone else’s hands!

So my day is fairly calm. Owen and I do chores, shop and he naps! Then at 3:55 we head back to the bus stop to pick up the raving lunatics {errr I mean my boys}. They come flying off the bus at 125 mph. Sean takes off up the street while Ben is hanging on Owen’s stroller. By the time I catch up to Sean, he is half way across the street. UGH this kid is going to give me a heart attack. I swear to God, no matter how many times I talk to him he still takes off running. Then we get inside where they invade the snack closet for the next hour straight.

The rest of the night is too embarrassing to type out for you! Just close your eyes and imagine living with the Gosselin’s in the middle of their lowest point with a side of Roseanne! Yeah, that’s how I feel most nights. I am struggling to find the balance right now of homework, snack, dinner, outside play, baths, etc. It’s been a huge adjustment this year and I pray that I can figure it out before summertime! I finally just organized all of the school papers that have been piling up since the start of school 3 weeks ago. I am never going to catch up!!! AHHHHH

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Just now catching up on some of my blog posts? Here are a few blasts from the past that I thought you might enjoy reading!!!!

Oh and please, please, please take a moment to click on this link below! Every click equals one vote for my page! I am doing so well over at Top Mommy Blogs and would love to move higher up the charts! Thanks again! Oh and remember that you can vote once every 24 hours!!!!

No, I am not talking about Christmas! You know what time it is. It’s Back to School time. Yes, I know that the boys have been back for a few weeks now but I finally have the chance to catch up on everything!

The first few weeks have gone very well. Ben is an old pro at the bus and full day of school thing. Homework starts tonight for him so we will see how that goes. Oh and his first spelling test is this Friday. Why am I soooo nervous? He loves that the first graders can buy snacks at lunch so of course he asks for a dollar everyday. He LOVES getting an icy pop! The kid is having a blast meeting new friends. Every day he comes home with a new name of someone that he met on the playground or he recognized from karate. It’s so cool seeing his excitement.

Sean has done very well too. He loves the bus and as far as I can tell he loves school too. He has had a few glitches with the bus but nothing major. On the second day of school he was stung by a bee right before he got off at our stop. The poor guy was hysterical but after 45 minutes of screaming and icing it, he passed out on the couch.

Then on the 3rd day of school he got off at the wrong stop. Thankfully he figured it out and jumped back on the bus before the driver pulled away. I wished he had never told me, but I have recovered (slightly). Other than that the bus has been ok.

Both of the boys are quiet when it comes to what actually happens at school. How was your day? Good. What did you do? Nothing. I’ve tried asking in different ways. Did you play kickball or basketball in gym? Who did you sit next to at lunch today? Did anyone have to go see the principal?

But they still don’t answer. Oh well, I guess that I better get used to that.

This week we had back to school night for each grade. Sean has the same teacher that Ben had last year so I know what to expect. She said that Sean is doing well, he is just a chatterbox! SHOCKING! They have a very busy schedule each day but Sean is hanging tough. I think the hardest part is not having lunch until 1:25 pm.

Last night I met Ben’s teacher and sat in his desk. He is so excited that he has a spot in his desk for all of his papers and books (aka a real school desk and not a table).

So overall, this school year has been a success. Let’s pray that we have a very UNEVENTFUL year of Kindergarten and First Grade! I will fill you in after conferences in Oct!

Oh and what have I been doing these past few weeks? Well I have been snuggling up with Owen, decorating for fall and trying to organize this house! Every day I tackle a new project. I just fixed my kitchen sink this morning. Later I need to tackle the toy room!

Remember to enter below to win your very own Silly McGilly. Such a cute gift for your little ones!

I still can’t believe that the above phrase is now a major part of my back to school supply list!

I never really admitted it to myself but Ben has epilepsy. I always just told myself that he had a few seizures and that was it. Yes, he was on medicine and went to the neurologist for sleep studies, EKGs, etc. But I never wanted to say that he had epilepsy. His first two seizures happened at pre-school a few years ago and I never witnessed one. I guess that’s why it was easier for me to deny the term epilepsy. Then he gave me a huge scare early on in the summer after he came home one day from basketball camp. I witnessed my very first seizure. Thank goodness my mom was there or I probably would have lost it. It was fast but it was scary. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

After his appointment at CHOP, the doctor decided to up his medicine. We think that he probably outgrew his old dosage. But she told Joey that to expect more and pray that he outgrows it after puberty. But as Joey and I were talking about this all one night, he really just looked at me and said “Erin, Ben has epilepsy”. I never said it before. Saying it out loud means that it must be true. I never used to say that I had skin cancer either. I just said “oh I had moles removed”. But when those moles are melanoma and basal cells, you have to just one day throw in the towel and call it what it is… skin cancer. It’s weird that once you put a name to something it’s real.

My son has epilepsy….

And we are all OK. It’s going to be fine. I thank God everyday that it’s not severe, it seems to be pretty minor but it’s still scary. There are some nights that I lay in bed until 3 am worrying that he might have a seizure on the playground and hurt himself. I worry what will happen but I know that I can’t control them, I can only control how I react to them. I pray to God that I never witness another one again. But deep down I know that I probably will. I am also thankful that I have a strong husband that can handle the doctors appointments, the overnight sleep studies, and the ever so wonderful blood work! Without him I would be a mess.

Since we did increase his medicine, everything has been calm. Well as calm as it can be with three loud and crazy boys! But it’s calm!