If there is one thing I learned from this drama it is to invest in the stock of tissue makers. Because everyone cries at least fifteen times a day, more on anniversaries of things (like kidnappings and such). Henceforth are the preciously snarky gems of wisdom I gained from the melodramatic tear fest I Miss you….

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I never, ever thought of this type of crafting arena. But it makes sense- in a crazy, insane, really out of this world sort of way.

Life lesson: Take that balloon animals! IV tubes are way cooler…at least when the insane start twisting them into pleasant images of flowers and bicycles. Love you mom!

Ultimate Home Protection

If you see a locked gate run up to it and shake it- do not, and I repeat, do not look for the button to open it prior to dramatically hitting the wrought iron barrier out of frustration.

Life lesson: Gates are locked for a reason. Best to overtly emphasis the fact that you are kept out with gestures of desperation and dramatic pounding.

I hate you Sliders!

Who doesn’t enjoy the 90’s sci fi hit Sliders? I know I love it…until I started thinking about the fact a world like I Miss You may actually be a parallel reality to our own where horrible things happen every three minutes.

Life lesson: Sorry Sliders. You somehow were roped into my perception of I Miss You. Thanks Jerry O’Connell for making me cry and hate life! Thanks a lot! I blame you (not YEH and definitely not Yoochun).

Cribs: I Miss You Edition

Borrison’s crib is freaking awesome. Indoor pool, secret room, weird hidden compartment under the over-sized bathtub, and an all encompassing CCT- what else could a person ask for?

Life lesson: 50 Cent take note- there is a new king of the crib and that person is Harry Borrison. Jealous? You should be.

Emotionally Damaging thoughts-ha! Repress them…

Until they blow up in your face (in a Yoochun grabbing you sort of way).

Life lesson: If you forget about it and ignore your emotionally horrid past then you will become a successful fashion designer. I suspect this is why the Olsen twins are succeeding in fashion.