There’s no situation in which I would touch that. And THAT is the worst insult I can throw at any woman. And I woke up in bed one morning a lonnnnng time ago with a chick we had nicknamed “The Gila…” As in “Monster.” Let that sink in Lindsay.

If she “just” had saggy boobs, I could live with that. There is just so much going wrong in that picture. Forgive me for saying so (I ain’t no Adonis either) but I don’t see what keeps that boat afloat.