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“She wouldn’t let me, she said they were naughty…”

June 30, 2008

Things we’ve learned from this series of Dr Who:

> UNIT are shit.
First the Sontarons break into their base (which looks more like some kids’ clubhouse than a top-security military type building). Next the Daleks glide (I was going to say walk, but that would be a tad insensitive) into their next base (this time some kind of hospital wing with screens), with no problems whatsoever. Do UNIT not have security?

Not only are their building penetrable, they’re also rather bumbling. Forcing recruits to test weapons that haven’t been properly sanctioned yet, for one.

> Anyone can access UNIT/America’s home security intranet type thing.
Mr Smith and the super computer at Torchwood were clearly able to hack in, but apparently any old laptop’ll do. Cribbins got online, Rose walked into a random computer shop and managed to upload to it. Even Harriet Jones was teck-savvy enough to get on to hear the Daleks and their message of doom.

Speaking of which, why was everyone so shocked at the Daleks’ return? “It can’t be…” whispered the Doc. Well… Actually… If you think about it, they *do* tend to come back every sodding year, so it usually *is* them, isn’t it, sweets? But a wicked Red Dalek (me want) and of course Davros and Dalek Kahn make a wondrously grotesque, maniacal pairing.

> Judoon is a brilliantly mirthsome language. Sign me to lessons now please.

> You can do a massive ensemble piece and it still be good.
I was a tad concerned that too many cooks would spoil the broth, but actually (apart from some unwelcome visitors – which we’ll get on to later) it was just great to have everyone together and my, what a showcase as RTD’s swansong. I doff my hat at you, sir, for creating (on the whole *cough* Torchwood *cough*) some really good popular sci fi stuff. Sadly I work, so I can’t catch The Sarah Jane Smith Adventures, but they do look cracking, don’t they? She’s rather good (and yes, still foxy)…

> Tennant is a great actor, but sometimes gets caught up in the moment a tad too much.
Check out BMTV next week for our End Of Series David Tennant’s Acting Masterclass.

> The Shadow Proclamation have drug issues with their staff.
That lady had serious red-eye. Munchies anyone?

> Cribbins is an absolute pleasure to watch.
At being asked if he has a webcam: “She wouldn’t let me,” indicating Donna’s mum. “She said they were naughty.”
I bloody love that man. Give him O’Grady’s slot, please!

> Rose shouldn’t have come back.
Yes I know. More controversy. I was a massive Rose fan back in the day. But even I didn’t want her back this time. Not only have we had Martha over shadowing this series, but we’ve had Rose pop up every other episode. Thankfully, Tate is a better actress than the two of them put together (yes, she feckin is, OK?) and so there was hardly any scene stealing involved. But if I had to watch her whinging and moaning about the fact that she “was there first” I really was going to turn off. I can’t stand her now. She’s just a spoilt brat who doesn’t deserve the Doc’s companionship (or love for that matter – you’d think someone as clever as he wouldn’t be swayed with such love-sick puppy eyes, but hey ho. Essentially he’s a man, so…)

> What are the Mr Copper Foundation and the Osterhaagen key?

> A bit of laziness does hurt.
Lazy Deus Ex Machina *yes again* with the “billions of phones all calling out at once” malarkey. Now, why does that sound sooooo familiar?

> This series has been the strongest.
I genuinely haven’t disliked one episode of this. Not that I can’t remember anyway. RTD has pulled out all the stops and his Turn Left and Midnight were among my fave eps of the series. I’m so glad, as I don’t like not liking people. But now, hand on heart, I have buried my issues with RTD and am now a fully paid-up member of the RTD fanclub. He’s great he is. Marvellous in fact.

And so to the end of the first half of the finale (oh, you know what I mean). I’m thinking the hand will have something to do with the Doc’s non-regeneration. After all, if we’re to believe that Tennant’s filming of the Xmas eps aren’t merely a decoy (and I don’t believe that any more) then he won’t be able to regenerate, right? Or can he regenerate but just have a slightly different eyebrow for example? Who fanatics? Care to venture?

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UNIT were always shit. But Doctor Who’s always been vaguely anti-military, so that’s how it should be. It’s leaders are meant to be Colonel Blimp types. This is when we have to be really thankful the Americans never got their mitts on the programme. They’re incapable to ever really denigrating their forces. Probably too scared to.

It is probably the best series so far, in the sense of there being no clunkers, but no episode has wowed me like Human Nature/Family of Blood/Blink did last year. Moffat’s tale was possibly my least favourite story but when it means so much to everyone else I’m not going to be arrogant enough to call it muddled and convoluted.

And you’re right about Tate. And here I can be a little smug as I knew she’d win people round. God, I’m going to miss her.

I agree, definitely the best series so far, it’s got stronger as well as the series has progressed, I wasn’t overly in love with the Pompeii one, the family were a little too Eastenders but other than that it’s been brilliant and I hazard a guess that the finale next Saturday will be the best finale since Eccleston’s regeneration at the end of series 1.

Mr Copper was the guy who stayed on earth at the end of Voyage of the Damned (him out of Keeping Up Appearances). He had future knowledge and a lot of money, so he seems to have set up this Foundation thingie.