Depression and ADHD

Help with my 15 year old boy...sorry a bit long

My husband and I had a very disturbing night today. Our both boys have attention deficit. My 15 year old has ADD and my 11 year old has ADHD.our older son is brilliant and has an IQ of 148, he just has a photographic memory and does very well in school. He is on Vyvanse which worked like a charm ..that’s what we thought. He had a huge meltdown this evening about his coursework. He is in all AP classes and is taking more intensive courses next year. He suddenly came out and said that he was terrified and could not handle his course work. He keeps wandering away, has isolated himself, and is even scared to keep his window curtains open. He simply is not able to take care of his projects as he gets distracted very easily. He also has very depressive thoughts. This alarmed us as we thought the meds were working and he was in his room all the time, either studying or playing online with his friends. He would seldom come and join us even if we insisted. We thought it was a teenage thing. But today he said that he feels that he doesn’t deserve free time as he keeps wandering off and does not get his work done. He procrastinates a lot, he gets distracted at the slightest of things. He started using terms like he was terrified overwhelmed, pressurized to keep up with his AP courses. He puts the pressure on himself and we cannot change his mind. He now wants us to have an IEP at school as he is not able to keep up.

I am not sure what to do? Who do I contact first, his pediatrician, his teacher, psychologist etc. I think he needs to be evaluated for add and depression and am worried that things may get out of hands. We constantly tell him to take things lightly, enjoy life and hang out with his friends physically, not online. But he does none of them. He does not eat and has lost weight. I work full time and am not able to be with him all the time. Please advise me what I should do as his talk last night completely alarmed us.

For sure contact the psych first. They can help immediately. Then the pediatrician. psychiatrist? They are the most effective for sure. Ugh. This is such a terrible disorder. I am a sufferer. Not diagnosed until 38. I went for my entire life! Yikes. Self medicated and the whole nine. The pressure he puts on himself alone is enough to drive him mad too. I really feel for you. Let me know how he is doing as soon as you know. I am going to be on here more:)

I agree. Talk with his prescribing doctor about what you are seeing and ask about an evaluation to look at depression and anxiety.

It may be better for him to get off the AP track and into classes a level lower—while he is very smart and his intelligence deems him able to handle AP classes, his psyche may not be able to handle it, and that’s ok. AP isn’t worth suffering, depression, and anxiety.

Talk with your son candidly as well. Ask HIM what he feels will help him to stress less. No one knows what he’s thinking except him. He’s old enough to start having input as well, and that always makes a plan more successful.

You might want to ask him if he has ever thought of hurting himself. My daughter (non ADD) is very bright, but has social anxiety. We switched her to online school mid-year last year, but she became so overwhelmed that she ended up overdosing. I had no idea she felt bad, much less that bad. If he says yes, make a safety contract with him, or at least get him to agree to tell you if he ever gives any serious thought to following through.

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