everything action theater

Agent Coulson is back from the dead and leading a new team to investigate the fallout from the Battle of New York in Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD, easily the most anticipated new show of the Fall and you can check out the first episode right here.

James Spader is one the world’s most wanted criminals who turns himself in with an offer to help the FBI catch other criminals, but he’ll only talk to a rookie profiler in the new NBC action/thriller, The Blacklist.

If you combined Parks & Rec and 21 Jump St, you would most likely get Brooklyn Nine-Nine and it’s as funny as that combination would imply, with Andy Samberg leading the 99th precinct in Brooklyn as goofy but effective detective, Jake Peralta.

Easily one of the most insane and fun shows of the new season is Sleepy Hollow where the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse and their demonic hordes are returning and the only man who can stop them is Ichabod Crane, who thought he killed one of the Horsemen back in the Revolutionary War. Check out the first episode right here.

JCVD and Scott Adkins are two of the world’s best hitmen who reluctantly team up to take down a drug kingpin and his army of goons and corrupt officials in Assassination Games, which you can watch in full right here.

Axe Cop is finally here to dispense his unique brand of justice on every type of bad guy and in this first episode, he goes right to the top against the King of All Bad Guys to rescue the friends of superhero Bat Warthog Man.

While the Punisher himself might be a slight step down from Tom Jane’s version, everything else in this movie is turned up to 11 as Frank Castle goes up against the horrifically scarred Jigsaw in Punisher: War Zone, which you can watch in full right here, thanks to Crackle.

After consulting with the “tallest TV executive we could find”, Adult Swim determined that the shot for shot remake of the opening of Simon & Simon, starring Adam Scott and Jon Hamm, was NOT the Greatest Event in Television History and tried again, this time with a shot for shot remake of the Hart to Hart opening, starring Adam Scott and Amy Poehler.