Pushed Nude Into This Assignment

Is this what Dan Savage had in mind, changing the sex of the students, of course? Image via citygarden.com

When Dan Savage agreed to be a celebrity model for the Drawing Jam at Gage Academy Dec. 1, he claims to have assumed he’d be pushed nude into the assignment.

Gage e-mailed him time and place, and he replied: do i need to shave off my pubes myself? or should i have jen do it for me? see you saturday. dan

Savage was referring to Jen Graves, Stranger art critic. Few things illustrate the difference between mainstream and alternative press better than this query. There isn’t a mainstream newspaper in the country whose top editor would type anything like this in an e-mail, and maybe that’s what’s wrong with the mainstream. Fear of being sued has freeze-dried the fun.

Gage, for its part, hadn’t planned on the naked truth. It panicked, but in a nice way.

Gage to Savage: Dan, Hmm, I’m not sure Jen deserves that job, she’s always been so kind to us. Whatever happens, your secret is safe since you’ll be fully clothed for this particular gig.

Dan to Gage: i’m coming starkers or not at all.

Gage to Savage, getting the joke: OK good, we will make sure that room #308 is nice and warm for you!

Graves, out of town but in the spirit of get along, go along: I’ll fly back from New York early if Dan’s Pubes Are In Need.

When he showed up, Savage was fully clothed and reading a New Yorker. Real models don’t need props, Dan.