Winning Android Market Comment Of The Day Goes To… [Humor]

Today’s winning comment from the Android Market goes to… this guy (above). Apparently, Dan doesn’t understand that when you install a launcher replacement from the Market and change your homescreen that it — well, changes your homescreen. Rather than take the time to repopulate his new homescreen (Launcher Pro) with icons and widgets, he uninstalled the app after 30 seconds. In one last effort to kick developer Federico Carnales in the shins, he would later reinstall the app just so he could rate it the app 1 star. Ahhhhh… Android n00bs. Gotta love ’em.

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Usually I’ll criticize Android sites for making fun of some Market comments, but this…………..I don’t know how this is even possible. It says the word ‘launcher’ in the title!

http://twitter.com/gamercore Chris Chavez

There are no words, James. No words..

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_YZ32VTTM27DZ536QVW54DYFABY Timothy B

But you wrote a blog entry on it…

david brand

then u read it, read all the comments, then wrote your own comment. how’s that logic working out for ya ?

Del373

Tim isn’t the one who said there are no words for it. In fact, he probably thinks there are many words for it. In which case your comment is rather invalid.

teepee

Phone has a “home screen” and the “home screen” can be changed with app named “Launcher”. Can you see a problem? Are you blaming this on a user that does not know all the technical terminology related to Android programming?

Tell me why was the program not named “Homescreen Pro?”

This is BASIC STUFF that Apple gets right every time because they understand their users. The problem here was caused by the developer for using an illogical name and failing to provide good documentation.

And with comments like that it is you who fails. I hope that you do not write apps for Android because programmers who think like that make the platform experience crappier than what it should be.

RampageDeluxe

hah!! “Lets all be good little automaton drones”

http://twitter.com/cr0wnest t1mothy tAn

Its not even noon, and this already made my day.

http://twitter.com/techmostwanted Ed

Well, being an android developer myself, i’ve seen more ridiculous comments, users just dont READ and UNDERSTAND the title+description before downloading the app. But sad to say, most these users came from the States.

I get people bashing me all the time for, “WHERE’S THE WIDGET NOTHING HAPPENS WHEN I OPEN IT YOU IDIOT STUPID HEAD”.

This is a new low though. It kind of paints a mental picture in your head of someone just randomly barreling his way through the market, installing every free app he comes across with reckless abandon.

http://mitchs.co Mitch Samuels

Lowest I have seen are on apps that are free to download, but you either have to buy an accessory (Tunelink Auto) or a subscription (Last.fm, Spotify, Etc..).

People think just because the app is free, you shouldn’t have to pay for other things.

Just read a Spotify review:
“I dont see the point in this, whats wrong with free mp3 downloaders.”

http://www.facebook.com/moondrius Nolan Smith

Blink also has some dumb reviewers in the market. How can the app make your HTC phones notification led blink blue when the actual led can only do red or green? Its not the devs fault that HTC cheaped out on the led.

xarophti

umm, unless HTC changed something in later generations, I have a 1st model HTC MyTouch 3G (over 2 years old) and have an app that will make the notification LED blink blue… (not the app’s sole purpose, however)

John Mozelewski

kinda sad that i didnt get to c this in the market but this made my night it’s probably the funniest thing i’ve seen in a long long time

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=602761196 Dario Sucic

It mostly happens on launchers, live wallpapers, widgets, and extensions (like flash).

jaylanPHNX

And don’t forget themes for launchers or other apps. Those are usually pretty bad.

Del373

Probably because some people don’t understand that the item they downloaded doesn’t open like a conventional app right?

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=602761196 Dario Sucic

Why don’t you take a look at the Flash app, the comments there are ridiculous.
” NO APPS TO SD UNINSTALLLLL”
“CAN’T OPEN APP ON MY LG OPTIMUS ONE UNINSTALLED”

lynyrd65

Adobe does deserve some flack for arbitrarily deciding not to support the older platforms.

BrainOfSweden

This was a lot of fun. In Sweden, the Market is flooded by comments like “1 star, doesn’t work on my Wildfire”. Okay, so your friend has an Iphone 4, and everything in the App Store is optimized for it. But you didn’t have enough money, so you bought a cheap-ass last gen phone, and most of the heavy apps doesn’t work? NO WAY!

vman_1981

If it doesn’t work on the wildfire because of the screen rez or whatever, it shouldn’t be listed as available to download…

Andrew

Doesn’t work because of the shitty specs such as a slow processor and low memory. *facepalm*
Edit: Btw I agree they shouldn’t show the apps that don’t work for that phone in the phones market.

BrainOfSweden

I did not say it had to do with such things. The comments are mainly found on optimized for high end kick-ass games.

BrainOfSweden

I did not say it had to do with such things. The comments are mainly found on optimized for high end kick-ass games.

jamisles02

So does “Dan” give Chevy, or Ford, or Honda or Toyota a 1 star rating for a car that accelerates when you press the accelerator? Can he even spell IQ? Sad, yet hilarious at the same time.

Endoverend

I find it painful to read comments like this. A new launcher that changed his homescreens? Well, that’s what replacement launchers do.

Failing to re-implement bad design decisions or snake-oil features found in competitors’ products will also net you many 1-star reviews. As a for-instance, one of our apps includes a task management capability (intended to enable you to terminate misbehaving apps). Roughly half the one star reviews we’ve ever received for it exclaim that the product “needs autokill”. The fact that we have several pages of documentation explaining how Android works and how autokill is a really bad idea (and how Google itself has specifically indicated as much) has had little to no effect.

roze008

I have seen that and what’s sad is some of these task mgt apps eventually bite the bullet and include the autokill button :( A few of my task mgt apps did this. I understand that the devs need to do what will get them food on the table but it’s so sad :(

Oh between Tod (I always thought your name is Ted), SystemPanel is one of my favourite apps… albeit that ‘kill all’ you have on it :P haha

Endoverend

Thanks!

End all (and the end all widget + exclusion feature) were partially a concession to users who simply demanded it. The “End all” button does at least require tapping-and-holding or selecting an option from a menu, and the documentation is very specific about when it should be used (and more importantly should not be used). It does actually have a legitimate use, i.e., “my phone is doing something really weird, I need to use it now, don’t want to reboot, and don’t understand what the cause is”. It’s not always the cure of course. That said I’m sure that even with the documentation, people will continue using it for the wrong reason.

I find there is a “technical folklore” that seems to have found its way into many aspects of Android use. My newest app has received criticism for failing to include an exit button. It already has an exit button, it’s the little “house” icon that is permanently attached to your phone. All the competing products that have an “exit” item in the menu are of course doing no more than moving their activity to the back or opening the Android home screen, unless of course they’re violating the Android API and doing something dumb like calling System.exit() to shut down their VM. It is extremely difficult to pull users away from these myths…they’re less likely to believe a developer of a highly rated app than they are the guy that sold them their phone at Best Buy.

And while I’m ranting :), let me not forget the very small section of users who think that even our paid apps must be up to no good because we have this-or-that permission that doesn’t seem to make sense to them. Nothing’s more fun than a one-star about the “full Internet access” permission and how we must be using it to steal their data…on an app whose description includes “transfer files over the Internet.”

xarophti

The problem there is all the alarmist tech blogs screaming about “ANDROID MALWARE!!!!!” and warning people not to download apps that request internet access or you better hide your kids, hide your wife, they rapin’ everybody all up in here…

Donny Ward

the best market comment ive seen was for scanner radio. it said:

“was robbin a bank and heard em coming. now im rich.. great app”

and the next 5-10 reviews were people just expressing their lol’s at that review… ahhaha

dman977

The point of these funny comments is that we are laughing at the reviewer, not with them

Aaron Sua

When I was working retail at a computer store I had a customer walk up to me and say: “So I’m thinking of getting a CD-Writer, what can I use that for?”

I replied: “Uhm…make CD’s?”

Customer looked embarrassed and said: “Well, besides that?”

So I said: “Read CD’s. What do you want it to do make toast?”

The upside to this story is that he was at least intelligent enough to realize his question was dumb and didn’t complain to management.

izanee

Thats a classic…hahaha

Frankie Abaddon

ROFLMFAO Holy cow poo now that’s too funny. 30 seconds and this boy made a wise choice not really me I love ADW so not really want for me plus CM7 didn’t get along with it. But come on this is why there’s malware problems people. Cause ov rocket scientist like this.

jbrandonf

Huh?

jeff

Even funnier are the morons that install the icon packs for these launchers and don’t install the launcher itself!

Then they drop the 1 star rating and comment on how it won’t install or that it needs to be fixed!

Read the entire description people!

NorthVandea

I love Launcher Pro (it hides my terrible Gingerbread MOTOBLUR) and all I can say is: what a dumb @$$…

But I still almost shot coffee out of my nose when reading this early this morning ;)

JoshUng

Well, clearing out all the home screens is a real pain. Obviously not the developer’s fault, but if they could code it so as much of the icons and widgets came over (I know, its probably a waste of their time), it would probably keep some of the non-technical customers around some, maybe buy the full version.

I have LauncherPro, and I love it (I love my Evo, hate HTC’s dock), but the first time I downloaded it and saw that I’d need to refill my screens I thought “F’ that” and probably waited a week to do it.

Someone_asdfg

Although this guy was obviously lazy and stupid, he did bring up a good point. I recently migrated from Launcher Pro to Go Launcher EX (partly because of a folder-opening bug that required me to reset LP every so often), and Go actually offered to install another application to help me migrate my homescreens (I’m not rooted).

Worked (though it could have used some usage details in the description / in-app), except for widgets needing to be replaced (but that’s an Android issue). All the icons were in the place I last left them.

Jamie

Some people should just stick with a basic nokia and nothing more funny though just use desk migrate copies it all great app

JRX1

And people say iPhone users are dumb, lol.

david brand

honestly they should not allow comments in the market. its just another place for the self-important losers in society that feel that their opinion is the best, to whine. honestly since the internet came out i think these losers bred and multiplied. everyones a critic, anyone else notice that ?

Disagree 100%. Comments are a way to effect change or prevent others from buying a shitty product. If all users are complaining about a bug or lack of a specific feature then the dev knows there’s an opportunity cost in not providing an update which can mean lost revenue.

I think the issue here is that most people don’t think of the words ‘launcher’ and ‘homescreen’ as synonymous. It doesn’t mean you’re an idiot, it just means you’re unfamiliar with android phones.

I felt the same way when I got my first droid, spent a while setting up my homescreens, just to install launcher pro and have to do the whole thing over again. It’s not because I’m crappy with technology (far from it, actually), but it was my first time handling an android phone and I didn’t know the terminology or the way that they worked.

http://twitter.com/multikev Kevin Cannon

Yea, it’s funny that this is being criticised. It’s actually a failing of Android, The Market, and the App developer that this problem exists. All, or some of them should have set the user’s expectations before purchase.

You can laugh all you like, fine, but really it just reflects badly on Android, as a platform.

Bill Dyszel

Developers who want to succeed should take the comment seriously and set appropriate expectations if they want to succeed in a consumer market.

http://twitter.com/kite203 Rua Ho Guom

If he spent his money to buy the app, he would have better comment. LOL