I feel bad knowing that I've personally wasted your time by not making my post sarcastic enough. Ignorance has cost you time out of your day that you will never get back and it's all my fault.

Doesn't matter if it was sarcastic. Everything I said in response is what I consider to be the case. Honest truth.

That said, you owe me one minute and a few deep breathes.

Soothing Mist:"Healing them for a minor amount every 0.5 sec, until you take any other action."Jade Serpent Statue: "The statue will also begin casting Soothing Mist on your target. healing for 50% as much as yours. " [What's half of minor?]
"Statue casts Soothing Mist at a nearby ally for toddler healing."