Real Feelings.

5 Basic Things You Need To Know About Vladimir Putin at the U.N.

Between all the sh*t going down in Syria, Russia and the Ukraine, Vladimir Putin addressing the U.N. General assembly is a big f*cking deal. Here are the 5 basics you need to know about it.

1. Vladimir Putin

He is the President and former Prime Minister of Russia.

2. Russia

It’s Asia’s biggest country. In landmass. Not population.

3. Russia’s International Image

Very complicated. We ain’t got time to get into it here.

4. The U.N.

It is a simulation of diplomacy and international relations. Like model U.N.’s held in high schools around the world, only much bigger and bureaucratic.

5. What does he hope to accomplish?

Garner international support for a military coalition to help the Assad government in Syria, the same famous for gassing citizens for protesting, so that they can properly combat ISIS. The Russian military escalation in Syria was leveraged into a reluctant meeting with President Barack Obama, presumably to talk about easing up on the economic isolation he’s put Russia in since the annexation of Crimea. Pick Barry’s brain. How can I scratch your back so you can scratch mine?

Putin isn’t expected to spend the night, which is a shame. Going to New York City and only going to the U.N. seems like a waste of a trip to NYC. But what do I know? I’m not a the President of Asia’s biggest country.

Hopefully Putin at least listens to this song when he’s cruising down 1st ave: