I would rather just have nothing to worry about, nothing to feel guilty about. If I didn't care then I could go on and not have this crushing pain picking away at me, and I could walk away an unchanged person. But I do care and I care a lot...

I don't want to care anymore. don't want to care anymore. I really just don't want to hurt like this anymore. I ******* hate it all. i just want it all to end, i want to not care anymore, and just go away, and not have to hurt anyone.

I hate having feelings... I hate having a big heart... I hate caring...
It sucks to have so much emotion. I almost want to go on more meds and go back to that state of zombie! I get frustrated, jealous, sad, mad and sometimes even happy gets in the way. Life is just too much...