Gilbert's Cover Shot, Gheorghe's Fitness Book

George Gilbert is a "motivational humorist" who lectures on "the benefits of laughter in life" to groups like the California Refuse Removal Council and has a blog in which he tells jokes ("Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.")

Gheorghe Gilbert, on the other hand, are two of the greatest things that have ever happened to D.C. pro basketball. This week provided yet more evidence. Despite being injured and sure to miss at least a month of the season, Gilbert Arenas pops up on the cover of the new issue of Dime, under the extremely unfortunate headline "Gilbert Strikes Back." Some copy editor's wishing he had stuck with "Return of the Meniscus" right about now.

Fitness has given me the opportunity to play professional basketball--to excel in life. And being physically fit has rewarded me with confidence and self-esteem. It will do the same for you.

Wait, fitness gave him that opportunity? Right, and it was manic weight training that landed Manute Bol in the NBA.

As pleasing as this all is, I can't help but be more intrigued by the future volumes in the series, including The Boy's Guide to Friendship and Communication, The Boy's Guide to Bad Habits and The Boy's Guide to Girls. Let me guess: they're guest-written by Michael Jordan, Rod Strickland and Gilbert Arenas.