Aaawwww, why are you guys so mean?!

Recommended Posts

Guest Calibre

Guest Calibre

What's with this MACVILEWHORE guy. He acts like a bitch just because he's been here for a while. He thinks he's Da Man because he disses people who come here for information on a game they like playing. If you don't have anything constructive to contribute to a "Newbie" message then don't say anything at all. /Me give you coffee /Me give you coffee HAHAHAHAHAH..... You must have something better to do. Did you know there's a place outside your living room called The Real Word. It has mind-blowing graphics, great sound and you don't even need a modem to interact with people in it. I must warn you though..... there is no continue option in the game so before crossing a street please wait for a green man.

Calciumbar: I don't like you, your a meanie, you don't play nice,
WAA WAAA BOO HOO *starts sobbing like a little baby with a boo boo*

me: Oh, I am soooo sorry little boyee, I never *I run into the kitchen and quickly whip up a pot of my SPECIAL guaranteed newbie FuX0ring formula coffee* meant to hurt *i inject myself with some berserker drugs and i start glowing red* ANYBODY! BLAAAAAAAAA I KILL YOUR PUNK ASS!! * I give calciumbar a berserker groin crunch, his nads explode with a loud POP!*

/me than gets a big old rusty cup and pours a nice big cup of the newbie formula coffee
/me than shoves it in his mouth, forcing it down his throat
/me than takes the empty cup, and with my berserker strength still fully powered, i give him a berserker punch in the face with the rusty old coffee cup, his face now only a crunched in mesh of rusty shattered glass and newbie fluids mixed with blood and brains
/me than calls the newbie disposal unit up to the 35th floor (my penthouse in the doomworld building)
/me than hears a gurgling noise and turns around to see the horror of horrors

Calciumbar's old head comes off like a cocoon and a new head gurgles out of his shoulders, and to my unending horror, its the head of Aaron Carter from the backstreet boys! ARRRGH!

Calciumbar: HEY GET DOWN GIRL, IF YOUR GETTIN DOWN BABY COME AND GET IT ON BABY! I WANT IT NOW!!!!!!!!

/me than runs out the door as he starts shooting out lost souls that sing every single song written by Britney spears.
/me runs up to the roof, and turns on the deadnail signal, the big NIN symbol shinging in the night sky will hopefully reach deadnail in time
/me than runs back inside and finds myself a javolin, after I find Calciumbar and his unholy pop army roaming down the halls I sneak up behind him and throw it right in his asshole, after which for some reason all the lost souls explode.
/me than berserker kicks Calciumbar's head off

Calciumbar, with no head, stumbles toward me like a drunken zombie in last ditch attempt to kill me when out of nowhere deadnail comes smashing through the window, armed to the teeth, with his trademark black trenchcoat.

Deadnail: Go MAC! I'm gonne puncture this mothafucka!

And with that, I jump out of the way as Deadnail takes out his Glock 47 and paints the halls red with Calibre giblets. After awhile of plugging him full of bullets Calciumbar, or whats left of his gored, holed out corpse finally goes down.

/me picks up whatever is left of the body and sticks it in my newbie formula, ready for the next unfortunate bastard who should arrive here and be an idiot.

After that me and the guys put on our monkey suits and run around the city grabbing chicks butts.