Friday, July 17, 2009

Menopause & The Dog

I've officially decided that 27 year olds just should not have to go thru menopause. I honestly don't know how women going thru menopause survive without hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I know its controversial and a touchy subject for a lot of people but I'm just sharing my personal experience.

My Gyn Onc was totally against HRT so I had to see my family practitioner about it (normal GYNs don't like to see me as they'd rather my Gyn Onc handle my case-I'm fun like that). She has been awesome about it. First we tried an Estradiol patch which worked great BUT once I started radiation, the radiation actually burned the adhesive to my skin. OUCH!!! So she put me on a spray, Evamist. I honestly don't know if any of it even got in my system. The past week was just downright ugly!! I didn't want to get out of bed, I dreaded spending time with my kids (TOTALLY not me), I woke up every morning with a migraine, I didn't want to eat, and bawled every night from being so exhausted and scared of what was going on with me. I seriously was just hating life and felt like I was losing it. Everything overwhelmed me and I just could not think straight.

Luckily I have an awesome husband who pegged it and said, "Its the hormones". Seriously my brain was just not functioning-I couldn't make the simplest decisions, so realizing it was the hormones was just out of my realm. My doctor was out this week so I had to make the decision on my own to go back on the patch. Its been a complete 360 just from yesterday. I still had a bit of a headache this morning but I was able and willing to get out of bed, pumped to play with the kiddos (we had an AWESOME day with the beautiful weather), excited to get work done, and not dragging or moping around the house. Sooooo glad to be human again!! I know it will be a few months before my levels get to where they need to be but even just one day has made such a difference-it can only get better!!!

I prayed so hard the first 4 days of this week, just asking God to bring light to what was going on and show me a solution (now thanking him for my awesome husband). I couldn't even handle taking care of the kids and it scared me. Then it made me really angry cuz there have been times in the past 6 months when I physically could not take care of them and I really thought I was beyond that point so I was full of anger that my babies were having to suffer and that I wasn't enjoying them like I normally do. Then I just piled on all kinds of super mom expectations and hated myself for not living up to it-yep pure craziness. Me without hormones is just not a pretty sight. Ben even said a few times that I was scaring him, and I know he was beyond maxed on stress having to pick up after me. Glad to be back on track for everyone's sake:)

Bouncing to a totally different subject... would anyone be interested in a puppy? She is a 5 mo old female blue heeler/lab mix-mainly lab, will probably grow to be about 3/4 of a full grown lab. Super duper sweet, very affectionate (LOVES tummy scratches), needs someone that can play with her and take her for walks-at this point we just can't handle it, plus she is a little big for Bella. She is very well behaved, obeys commands, is great with other dogs (haven't seen her around cats), and loves to play fetch. We got her for Bella's bday but Bella is just too intimidated by her size to even play with her. She is still in the puppy stage of nimbling so she can't be around Hunter and would need a home without real young children. She is just full of love and such a sweetheart that its hard to let her go but we know that we just can't give her what she needs. She'd be an awesome hunting dog if anyone is interested in that aspect, and is very trainable.

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Recent Update: After posting this blog Danielle ended up in the ER Sunday and then was sent by her new medical oncologist to Mercy for a blood transfusion Monday night and did not get home until 3:30 a.m. this morning. She already says she feels better - still tired but not totally fatigued and stressed as she has been over the last two weeks. Low hemaglobin caused all of this and she feels better just knowing what it was. She is to follow up with her new medical oncologist in two weeks and then he is going to follow her main care from there. They were totally awesome to her at her PCP's office and called the oncologist while we were there waiting and got the ball rolling on this so she has two excellent doctor's looking over her care right now. She is a trooper and I love her dearly and just want her to continue working towards her goal of being back to herself. She understands it does take time and is hanging in there. Thanks to everyone for calling to check on her and keeping her, Ben, and their children in your thoughts and prayers. She will be blogging again sometime this week - just didn't have the energy recenty but at least now we know why. Thanks - Robin - Danielle's mother. :-)

About Me

Christ lover and follower, prayerful wife to an amazing husband and father, minivan driving Mama to my tiny dancer Bella and my sunshine guy Hunter, daughter to a zebra, cancer butt kickin' warrior princess, baby dreamer... with a heart for the broken, the homeless, the orphan, and the sick. Waking up every day hoping my tiny light shines for all His glory, building a Christ-centered family, leaving my heart and mind open for all that God has in store for me.
These are the random notes on things that pull at my heart strings- things that make my heart smile, cry, laugh, and do squealy girl flips.