Archive for Zombies

Last year a game was released. Left 4 dead. The wait of the game made many zombie fan’s mouths water with the thirst for zombie killing good. Both Pc and xbox360 owners were given the chance to kill as many zombies as they can. The game was phenomenal and gave Valve the chance to make more decisions with what the fans wanted in the sequal. And Valve didn’t disappoint.

Left 4 dead 2 was made and with it came a game that was to be able to make up for what Left 4 Dead lacked. In the first game, it had four separate stories. No Mercy, Death Toll, Dead air and Blood Harvest. The game had potential. Soon after almost a year, Valve released DLC for the game, to connect No mercy and Death Toll. Before that came a new mode called Survival. This DLC is free, unlike the DLC after it which were to be paid for. The game did great with the competition, but there were one problem I felt with it. It got stale and boring. I couldn’t play it after the multiple times of playing it over and over until I got tremendously bored and went on to play something else. There was almost no stories and the campaigns didn’t connect with each other therefore left me with a boring dull shell of what could be a fun zombie killing game.

Though many fans started a campaign to stop Left 4 Dead 2 from being made into a game and not simply DLC. But Valve just laughed at them and continued onward to making a great game. The game still had competition with Modern Warfare2, Assassin’s creed 2 and many other titles. But to some Left 4 Dead 2 is a great game and is a title that deserves to purchased. Now when I seen many of my friends playing it I was angry that I dont have the money to buy it, well after weeks of saving change and doing chores I bought the the game and here’s my review.

When I played and beat the first game I felt as if there was alot missing and those parts that were missing could be made up for with a sequal. And they did! Left 4 Dead 2 takes place in the southern states of America. Just like the last game, after the opening credit which gives way for the first campign of the game. The game now gives you 8 melee weapons to slice, dice and general to killdeathmurder the zombies with. And once again, the game has loads of references to more zombie flicks. Saun of the dead:Cricket paddle. Dawn of the Dead(Remake and original):Mall setting and chainsaw (which honestly I think everybody wanted even if it isn’t related to the remake). ZombieLand: Highway part of the second campaign. There is more, but right now I’m focused on the game not the references. The game now does have a story that you can follow so play the campaigns in correct order.

The zombies are now more smarter like they were suppose to be in the first game. They now flood in from every open spot in the game, but I did see a zombie spawn once and die…it was like the game aborted the zombie. :C
Anyway, the graphics have been improved and the game seems more fleshed out then the last one. DLC has even been annouced due to one of the campaign’s iconic rock band. There are even two new type of ammo. Incidinary and explosive. But both are a pain to set up, but nice because you open the box on the ground so both you and your friends can take some. The game has little fun achievements in it. Like in the campaign Dark Carnival there are two achievement that you can get by playing two carnival games. This adds more to the replay value for me.

There are three new zombie types. Charger, Spitter and Jockey each new and vile in every sense. The game has the ability to make a simply little horde a living hell for you. The AI director can now recognize player stress levels and add more tension to make it harder for you to play against twelve or twenty zombies with addition of the three new and old special zombie types. Another new addition is the two new in-game modes. Survival which was originally a DLC for the first game and Scavenge mode. The game has alot more guns to kill with and a new grenade. Boomer Bile. You can pick these up when you kill a hazmat suited zombie. These grenades can attract normal zombies unto whatever you throw it upon. So if you have the grenade and there’s a tank in your way, so theres no funner way to kill it with other than Boomer Bile. You can watch that said tank be torn apart by common zombies. And alot of them will attack so there’s no chance of the tank fighting against the lots of them. Also there are clown zombies, they’re funny in a dark sense of humor, also they might be a reference to ZombieLand.

Left 4 Dead 2 is just another great game that is hidden by oh so many other great games. I reviewed this game because I wanted to show that this isn’t just some other shooters out there, this game is a shooter that has Zombies, Gore and isn’t Fallout3 or Modern Warfare2. I should though Review Assassin’s Creed 2 and Modern Warfare 2, but out of the sequals that came out Left 4 Dead 2 takes the cake…for now. I might just do a Review of Assassin’s Creed 2 and Modern Warfare 2 just for the hell of it. But if your bored of listening to others talk about what prestige they are in COD or what does The Truth mean then play Left 4 Dead 2. Its a fun and exciting game to play. I give this game 4 1/2 decapitations out of 5.

Every day we use quotes from movies. No matter what genre, but on one special holiday, men, women, child and shit even animals get dressed up as my one favorite genre movie characters. Horror movies are really great, shit I basically thrive off them. I will be counting trilogies and sagas in this list. Here’s my list on the top horror movies.

10. Alien trilogy (not counting resurrection).

In 1979 director Ridley Scott introduced the world to anew type of alien. A parasite that facial rapes you then leaves an egg in your chest and when time comes for it to hatch it has one hellva entrance

When I was little this movie scared the living shit out of me. I couldn’t go to bed without the thought of the facehugger raping my face and then my chest exploding from a little monster. Well after I got over the whole “Im scared shitless about alien” and got the balls to see the sequels I noticed something. The alien from the first movie was sort of a “special” alien….It was a retarded alien. I mean come on it didn’t pull off the shit like the ones from the other movies, like running on walls, using it’s tail more and well being more sneaky. This movie is a must see for anybody looking for something cool to watch. The movie was great back in then and is a classic scifi-horror movie now.

9. John Carpenter’s The Thing.

Once again I when I watched this movie as a kid I was paranoid. Like almost every kid, their imagination is wild, mine was how can you say? Batshit crazy? I thought that my parents were the Thing and were trying to get me infected with the thing with feeding me foods I hated. Well now that’s all over with I can trust them now…or can I?

Anyways, in 1982 master of horror John Carpenter decided to do a remake of a classic with the same name, The thing from outter space. Both stories are alike in some ways. In the original, the alien was a vegetable-like creature and fed off of blood and hated fires, it had a mad genius who wanted to do something with the alien and it never mimicked other worldly creatures and people. In the remake it infected many just by touching them, no evil scientist even though a scientist does go apeshit and try to kill everybody, can transform into the aliens that it adsorbed or devoured and Hated fire

You see that shit. That dude freaked the fuck out. The alien enjoys the cold, but it would suck if the movie took place in Hawaii. The Arctic was a great place to based the movie on, which the book was based on. Once again we have that famous formula; Book->Movie->Remake. I haven’t read the book yet, but I can’t wait to get my hands on it. The movie still scares me. The animatronics are wonderfully scary and if you have enough time to watch the entire behind the scenes featurette then you will learn the dangers they went through to make this movie. When you want something to really get under your skin then watch John Carpenter’s The Thing in the winter…when it’s actually cold out, it feeds to the atmosphere.

8.Feast.

This movie is just….Feast is a movie that…..I just- I don’t know how this got on the list I really don’t. I have many words for movies, but this movie is just- I can’t stress this enough, but if you watch this movie you won’t look at life the same anymore. After I watched this movie I just couldn’t help but think about how fucked up Matt Damon, Ben Afleck, Wes Craven or the other guy who made this movie. The trailer wasn’t even close to making out what was in this movie

I’ve seen many disturbing things in my life, but this movie brings a new meaning to facial rape, vomit, maggots, rotting people and other fucked up shit. I couldn’t think straight for a month, no really my mind was just stuck on what I just watched almost 30 days ago.

I heard that there’s three sequels out already, as badly as I dont want to, something in my stomach says that I need to watch the sequels. This is one of those movies were you just need to be freaked out and you have nothing better to do. But in honesty, watch this movie just for the hell of it. Sure after watching it you might look at me in a different set of mind, but you know that it was worth it…in some sick way.

7.George A. Romero’s Day Of The Dead.

When it comes to zombies nobody can top it like George Romero. He started the whole zombie movie. Before him zombies were only humans hypnotized and were voodoo induced people. Sure White Zombie gave Rob Zombie a name for a band and made Bela Lugosi a better name in the horror genre, but those zombies weren’t the zombies that are famous today.

George Romero started the series off with Night of the Living Dead and as it progressed it got better over time. When Day of the Dead came out it showed a new, smarter zombie. And what has happened to the world after the zompocolypse. This movie has many famous parts. Most famously the death of Captain Rhodes

The beginning scene of the movie is very eerie and scares me. The music and feeling that the movie portrays is very lonely and it really feels like your all alone in the world and the zombies are out to get you. Romero’s zombie movies have stopped at Diary Of the Dead, a movie that is short of scares and tries to rip off of the CloverField style, you know the whole camera shot. Yet many say that Diary is just another beginning for the zombies and that Land of the Dead is the true future of the living dead. Yet George Romero isn’t entirely fond about his zombie movies, that’s all that he’s famous for, but he wants many to notice his other works of art. Like…

6.Creepshow.

Directed by George A. Romero and written by Stephen King. Creepshow is a movie that is inspired by the Tales From the Crypt comics. The movie is divide into about six separate stories that are all sorts of horror. There’s tons of appearances from many famous actors. Leslie Nelson from Airplane! Stephen King plays a comically dimwitted farmer who has the misfortune of discovering a meteor. The movie is darkly funny and has many parts that are scary and disgusting. Wait! Did I just mention the magical word about this movie? Aw yes disgusting

This movie does not lack anything that wouldn’t make it a horror movie. I has everything from a huge monster that kills a mans bitchy wife to a person being killed by bugs. If your a fan of Stephen King and/or George Romero then you have to pick this movie up sometime. There are two sequels that arn’t worth watching and a new online series is beginning.

5.Dead Alive (Brain Dead).

In the begging of Peter Jackson’s career he had some miss and hits, but hits like Dead Alive. The movie is a gore-fest of gore. It’s fucked up in so many ways that some of the shit you see will either make you puke or make you cringe at the sight of it. The first time I watched this movie I was pretty small so I didn’t remember much, but when my friend picked it up on dvd I know why I couldn’t remember it, my mind was protecting me from all of the gore and horror that is this movie. When I say horror I mean it in a good way.

This movie has one of the most memorable scenes in zombie death scene history.

Now these zombies are voodoo zombies yet they have some of the traits of virus zombies. The curse came from Skull Island (Jackson couldn’t resist) and an evil Sumatran monkey-rat;who origins are pretty fucked up by itself (Rats from a slave ship came to the island and raped the monkeys of the island). Linoel’s mother get bitten by the monkey-rat mindfuck and then the madness begins. The movie is so messed up that two zombies fuck and have a baby. It’s so fucked up that I have to show a video of the baby

4.Return of the Living Dead.

This movie has nothing to do with George Romero. I repeat This movie has nothing to do with George Romero’s zombie flicks. The movie only has a reference to it. This movie is in a league of it’s own. The movie is just really damn good and does not hold back on whatever point it’s trying to make. The movie begins when a gas canister breaks and brings back a body inside of it and everything that once lived, inside the warehouse. They burn an infected body since these zombies can’t be killed since they’re already dead and eat brains to kill the pain of being dead.

The movie sets up the stereotype for zombies that they only want brains and not like the regular zombies that only want flesh. These zombies think and talk. Infact there’s this one zombie that has grown to be pretty big and i can’t blame his fans

I can’t stop watching this movie because it’s just so damn good and different from the rest of the flock. The movie has a naked metal/punk chick dancing in a cemetery and then later she kills a hobo because she becomes a zombie (scary one at that). Now this movie has about four or five sequels that are just utter shit. This is the movie that you need to watch.

3. It’s Alive.

When a horror movie comes out there two things that can happen, either it’s a blockbuster hit that does scare people or it’s a controversial movie that doesn’t scare anybody and makes shit for money. Well It’s Alive should have some controversy for the monster bit. The monster is a baby. That right when mrs.Davis gives birth to her baby she soon finds out that it’s a murderous little beast. The baby is a frightening sight to see. This movie makes you see little cute babies as little monsters.

I remember seeing this movie and being scared of the baby, infact I still am. It’s a spooky sight. It’s like a baby, but in a sense it’s a not of this world

It’s strange that the baby could get around and kill so many people without being caught or seen. Also the cops enjoy shooting the shit out of it, but of course they miss the target. The baby is a mutant radioactive monster, so this means the movie is a most definitely a b-movie. It has two more sequels which arn’t really something you would want to want to watch at all. Watch it, but dont watch it…alone!

2.28 Days Later.

Back when Danny Boyle actually made good movies he had given the world a purpose to fear the new breed of infectious zombies. In 28 day later the zombies dont shamble around and moan they’re more animal-like and arn’t slow. They can infect you the traditional way of either biting or scratching, but if any of their blood gets in your eye, wound or any opening to your insides you can become infected.

In a series of events the infection is released when…are ready for this…when a bunch of animal conversationalists try to free a monkey that’s infected with the “rage” virus. The monkey then infects one of the hippies (beats getting shit flung into your face), then the infected hippie attacks everybody in the room, even the scientist that warns them about the monkey, smooth move dipshit. The trailer is badass by itself

The movie is bloody good and it has it’s moments where shit puts you on the edge of your seat and have you white knuckle tight. The movie has it’s share of fan-dom. There’s even a graphic novel that finishes up the movie and it’s sequel.

1.House of 1000 Corpses.

Rob Zombie. Rob Zombie has got to be one of the greatest directors amongst this generation. House of 1000 corpses is just fucking lovely, and I love me some gore and violence. Sid Haig, Sheri Moon Zombie, Bill Mosely and my favorite Walter Phelan. The movie revolves around four people who trying to survive the Firefly Family. One of the most fucked up families around. Like rednecks can’t compare to how crazy they are.

Now with horror aside…this is one hellva funny movie. In order to enjoy a horror movie you have to have a great sense of humor both dark and light. Capetian Spaulding (being played by Sid Haig) has got to be one of the most twisted and funniest clowns I have ever seen. And the evil fucking Clown from It isn’t scare he’s just stupid looking. Captian Spaulding has that feeling like he could have been real or atleast a clown out there could have been this crazy. The beginning of the movie is just awesome

I suggest that you watch this movie right now! If that beginning part didn’t get you into the movie then you can just go to hell because that was the best damn before-credit-scene ever. Well not ever because Zombieland has that title.

This is the best damn opening for a movie ever! No like give me any movie opening and I’ll be a douche and put you down. Read my review of Zombieland. For those who don’t know what band this is and what song it is the Band Metallica (fuck yeah) and the song is (obviously) For Whom the Bell Tolls off of the Ride the Lighting album. Now if your a reader of this blog and noticed that theres not that many video of the weeks then all I can tell you is that I get the case of the “fuck it’s” alot and just get lazy. But today I feel as if it’s my humanly duty to show this epic video. Go SEE ZOMBIELAND You wont regret it unless you have no balls…or no heart….or you just suck.

Hello there zombie freaks alike! Im here bringing you this review, brought to you by F the FTC. No really they can go fuck themselves. This movie review has been long awaited and well deserved for this blog. I have been wanting to review this movie so badly that I nearly went into killing my neighbor who seen the movie twice, dick. Well I’ve been busy with school and lately the post have been mostly shit-tacular, yet with today’s review comes one of the greatest fuckin’ movies of all time. Zombieland! Let me start off with saying this Emma Stone is one fine fox, oh the things I could do to her, anyway back to the review.

Remember when you had all those thought about what you could do in a world full of zombies, fuck the seat belts, who needs to exercise, all the ammo you want, well things arent what you suspect. This movie will give you the rules that you need to survive in zombie. Safety is your friend. The movie will give you rules like buckle up, do alot of cardio; shit like that.

The movie straight off the bat is fun. At parts you will get a good scares. Zombieland has a grand friggen way telling all the main character’s back stories. The movie begins with Columbus (nickname) is traveling light (its one of his rules, trust me theres a shit load of rules that do apply to his survive and possibly yours aswell) after having a good run in at a gas n’ gulp with some zombies, he’s walking a highway and then he meets Tallahassee, a redneck with a missing ?Puppy” problem. Then soon team up and head east towards Columbus and Tallahassee.

Columbus is traveling to of course Columbus, Ohio. To see if his family is alright, he’s aloner so he doesnt have any friends before the whole zompocolypse.

Tallahassee is traveling to-well you get the idea, he’s searching for the world’s last twikee, because they might be the only thing that relieves him of the evil shitstorm of the world and they have an expiration date.

As they go into a supermarket together to look for a box of Twinkies they stumble upon two sister one being Emma Stone (Hawt) and the other being little miss sunshine. Little miss sunshine is little rock and Emma Stine plays as Wichita.

Little rock pretends to be bitten and so Wichita asks for the guns from both Columbus and Tallahassee, but soon betrays them, then go off with the only ride the guys had.

Later Columbus and Tallahassee find a hummer filled with guns. Then once again the duo fall for another trap made from the sisters. From this point on they stay a team and the sisters want to go to a theme park that they haven;t been to since they were little.

The movie has alot of ways of telling the stories of the characters. Tallahassee had a “puppy” that he loved bu when shit went down his “puppy” went missing. Columbus well like said hes a loser thats just trying to survive. Little Rock and Wichita are just trying to make it to that theme park and were on the run for a while before the zompocolypse happened.

The movie is a great mixture of comedy,horror and drama. The opening credits are just awesome. The song For Whom The Bell Tolls isnt what I expected, but hell its Metallica and its a great montage with zombies.

The back stories to the sisters and Columbus are funny and extended, but Tallahassee’s is just deep and has more to it.

The only problem I had with it was that I missed a few of the rules that pop up during the movie. And that the girls’ back story wasn’t really funny.

Now the really funny part is when they go to Bill Murray’s house. That entire part made me shit my pants laughing. I warn you Now. I will spoil this one part for you. When the group get to California they look for famous places to stay. Tallahassee goes right for Bill Murray’s mansion. Now right from the get go his house is full of his face, paintings and all. Little Rock asks who Bill Murray is, Tallahassee gets pissed and says that not knowing who Bill Murray is, is like not knowing who Gandhi is. Little rock then asks who Gandhi is? As everybody searches the house, Bill Murray acting like a zombie surprises Wichita and Tallahassee, Wichita hits Bill with a golf club then Bill Murray yells out in pain not like a zombie. Soon Bill, Tallahassee and Wichita bake together and pretend to fight ghosts together. They send Bill into the movie room to scare Columbus. Remember Columbus is a pussy and will shoot anything that scares him, guess who he shoots. Yup Bill Murray. The whole time Bill Murray is dying it’s funny as hell.

Well as the movie goes on you find out that Columbus gets the family he deserves and that Wichita’s real name is Crista. Even hawter!

They movie seemed short, but long in reality. The movie gave many quotes and many rules for survival. I honestly believe that this movie replaces one of my top ten favorites. If you want something funny and scary to go see then dont waste your time on some shit and go see Zombieland. I give this movie 5 zombie outbreaks out of 5….

When everybody brings up the apocalypse or End of the world theres alot of “Ways” on how the human race and/or the entire world can bite the dust. But the aftermath of the apocalypse is what I’m interested in. Thats if the world wasn’t wipe clean of life by some sorta of cosmic ray or something. There are many books and professionals that work in the field of “Barren fucking wasteland survival guides and shit.” that tells us about where to go, what to do ,what NOT to do and who do you kill off first [Go for the naggy bitches first]. Apparently theres been a great interest in two apocalyptic theories: Robot uprise! And Zombie take over.

Down side of the Robocolypse:Now at first thought of those they sound like bullshit and silly. But try to imagine, try to think of your town and a barren wasteland being overrun by fucking Wall-es. Yes Wall-es, giant Wall-es, small Wall-es, Wall-es with lasers, Wall-es with 12 gauge shotguns attached to their shoulders. This maybe a wrong usage of examples, but fuck if I use the Terminator that’d be stupid. I’m going to use a cute little robot that is just adorable to show you how the robot uprise will mess with our heads making us think “Awww, Wall-e won’t hurt me, after all what kind of robot would he be?” Well that answer is that, humans wouldn’t be hiding so long that our Wall-e robot overlords would gain emotions, given that they don’t start an uprise with emotion app in them. So think of this. Giant evil Wall-es, killing humans, trash compacting almost everything and there’s no Arnold to go back in time to stop it from happening.

Upside of Robocolypse: With our new robot masters in charge, everything will be in order and stacked highly since Wall-e enjoys stacking all our trash and worth-less junk will be stacked and not all over the place. Hopefully the robot masters will have a deciding system that sees both side of the story so that humans will have an equal chance of survival.

Downside of Zompocolypse: When you think of zombies what do think about. No not Micheal Jackson before he died. You think of rotting, moaning, non-intelligent [like the people on vh1 and Mtv], blood thirsty creatures, emotionless beasts from hell. I would seem that zombies have began getting love by modern-day culture and books on how to survive an encounter on a low level like one or two to high risk epidemics that reach into the thousands. Sure we don’t know if zombies are real or not, I mean there are so many stories that in the future somebody should make a child’s books about the flesh craving fucks. The zombies that are in the idea of the aftermath of a apocalypse scenario would introduce The Radioactive Zombies! Yes not only would you have to worry about being bitten and turned into a zombie, you will have to worry about an encounter that may give you radiation poisoning and even death. One minute your walking through your bombed elementary school and then your meeting glowing fucking zombies. When your traveling at night and you see a glowing zombie you know that the shit has hit the fan. On the other hand, the radiation from the nukes are possibly killing the brain, the zombie’s source of power. Also when you find a really safe place to sleep make sure that you have ear plugs since the moans of the zombies could drive you mad. I mean your alone, havn’t talked to anybody in days, you seen some shit that’s just horrific and now there’s a constant noise all around you, yeah your going to become batshit insane.

Upside of Zompocolypse: Every time you want somebody to stop annoying you, you’d wish for them to go away, well here ya go, nobody around for miles or feet. Have anger problems then just kill a few zombies, nobody should care, I mean it’s all over so whats the point in Not killing the undead. you can spend some quality time with your loved ones, unless they’re undead already, you can still talk to them and even call the filthy names like “corpse fucker”, OK that was uncalled for, but still you can have all the time to travel around the world once you have the equipment and knowledge. Want silence then here you go, all the silence you can get since there’s not that many people taking. And you can go on an unlimited shopping spree and you can handle a gun or weapon for once in your life isn’t that splendid :D.

In all, the end of the world may never happen since there’s way too many prediction that clash against each other. If one of these end of the world scenario happens I’m hoping for the zombies. Maybe instead of zombies we can have vampires! Then everybody is happy and not brainless. Funny the way it is.