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Oh, don’t look at me like that. Even if you’re married and can’t actually lick the toothpaste, I bet you’ve been tempted.

Just a little too much squeezed out…welp, can’t put it back in the tube…is anyone watching but the cat…

*LICK*.

Sure, it sounds gross. But only because of the possibility of being the second person to lick the toothpaste, instead of the first.

Licking the toothpaste, along with drinking milk out of the carton, eating ice cream straight from the container, and leaving your dirty socks on the floor, are all the province of single people. I know if I was sharing my tube of toothpaste with someone, I wouldn’t be licking it. Who knows where that other person’s tongue has been!

But since I’m single, there’s no one around to witness my gross behavior. Or to possibly infect me with hoof-and-mouth disease, or whatever you might get from going around licking things other people have licked.*

A blogger I follow recently mentioned that she brushes her teeth in the shower. That’s one I hadn’t thought of before, and you couldn’t really do that if you shower with a partner. Then again, between washing extremely recalcitrant thick hair and shaving my legs and trying to get clean, I already have enough to last me 20 minutes if I don’t rush!

What other sorts of cool, “gross” things am I missing out on doing? Give me some ideas!