Stuff You Can Buy!

Don't you need more stuff? Everyone knows society judges you by the number of
things you own. But how can you get more things? How? How?
Well, here are some wonderful things that you can buy for yourself. Go ahead,
you'll feel better if you do.

Games

Games are fun. I love playing games. So much so, in fact, that I've even
designed a few of my own. So check out
Square Gear Games, where you
can buy all the games that I've published. Keep coming back, too. More games
are in development.

Tengwar

Tengwar is an alphabet J.R.R. Tolkien invented. It is used by the Elves of
Middle Earth in The Lord of the Rings. It can also be used to write English.
I, for instance, have used it here to make amusingly irreverent t-shirts.

With
this shirt, people will ask you, "What does your shirt say?" And you will
respond, "Something in
Elvish," because that's exactly what it says. But they
will still ask, "Ok, but what does it actually say?" To which you will reply, "It
actually says, 'Something in Elvish.'" Then they will probably claim that you
don't know what your own shirt says. But you can assure them that you do, and that
it in fact says, "Something in Elvish." At this point they will just get frustrated
and you will just chuckle smugly.