Monday, March 23, 2009

Monday, March 23, 2009

Yeah, yeah, guys, I get it: you want your cake to show some personality, reflect your interests, and ideally gross-out the in-laws. But really, a giant dead animal on your wedding day? Really? This must be another time when my plumbing prevents me from grasping the intricacies of the male mind.

At least this one's still showing some signs of life:

Well, as much as the baker, anyway. (Ah, candid photos, how we loathe thee.)

Oh no, but look! He's sinking into the Swamps of Sadness! Fight against the sadness, Artax! Don't let it get to you! Just because you're about to be carved up and served on camouflage-print paper plates is no reason to get all down in the dumps! Artaaaaax!!

[sniffle] Sorry. I hate that part of the movie.

Ok, where were we? Oh, right, at the economy section:

Sure, it doesn't feed many people, but then no one will want to eat it anyway. See? A win-win. Plus, mad props to the garnisher; those green spriggy bits are really classing the joint up.

(By the fabulous Tara of Tara's Cakes, who has an equally fabulous sense of humor.)

Like so.

I know we shouldn't look a gift deer in the mouth, but those buck teeth* are cracking me up. I can almost hear him saying, "Gawrsh! Why don't you carve yourself a slice? Ahuck!"

Still, I'll take goofy over spooky any day. And I'm not sure there's a chipper enough party hat in all the world to uncreepify this guy:

Sure, he's smiling, but that smile never quite reaches his eyes, you know? And he won't stop staring, like he knows something I don't.Hey, you lookin' at me, punk? Yeah? Well quit your smirking, or I'll break your antlers off!

Oh, I'm sorry; I see someone already did. Huh. That had to hurt. Well, never mind.

Huge props to you for the Neverending Story quotage. :-D That part was way worse in the book because Artax could talk (?!) and was basically begging Atreyu to turn away so he wouldn't see his final moments. *weeps*

As for the deer cakes I'm mildly alarmed because I almost think my husband would like some of these. He sent me a picture of the camo he/shemale deer cake from this very blog not realizing I read it every day and said, "Here's an idea for a cake for you to do sometime." Thank god I'm not skilfull enough to sculpt cakes so I probably won't have to worry about him suggesting one of these.

#2 (aka Artax) is actually pretty well done, I like the cartoonish shaping of his head, but his antlers are way too realistic... I hope they aren't actually real. No one in their right mind would put real antlers on a cake, right?

I was cruising through these cakes muttering about the stupidity of dead deer at a wedding--what a joyous symbol of "twue love"*--and then I got to His Toothiness. I thought it's a cross species wedding--a deer and a rabbit. It makes as much sense as dead deer groom cakes.

I don't know which is worse:the fact that I'm now having sad flashbacks about that scene in The Neverending Story, or that I can't get that creepy deer face out of my head. Ew. Scares me on so many levels. Those EYES!!

I fear the desire for a deer groom's cake is much more insidious and Freudian than just grossing out the in-laws or whomever...Men are sooo transparent and they don't even know it! (No - you don't want to think about it too hard...chuckle - argh)

From laughter to sadness and back to laughter. This post is like one, long emotional rollercoaster. And Bucky the Toothy One had me going "Bahahahahha" and "WTF is wrong this picture?" at the same time.

Men are so weird! I am married to one and I don't even PRETEND to understand him! hehehe...And I agree with someone else who posted..I am glad I can't do cakes this well because my husband would LOVE one of those crazy deer cakes..gah!

Love the buck teeth...at least you can laugh at that one. The one with the dead eyes is just creepy and I'd have to seriously rethink my friendship (or marriage if that was a groom's cake!!) to the fellow who thought that was a good idea.

@Kate; That ingenious incident happened right here in MY state! It was all OVER the news. It wasn't much of a surprise, though-- I done heerd tell of some purty odd folks!(No, the film Deliverance wasn't filmed "right cheer", but sometimes I think it could've been.) What I really got a boot out of was THIS (from the newspaper)-- what an OFFICIAL from Fish and Wildlife had to say about the fake deer antlers:"Something wasn't natural about them, in addition to the fact that they weren't natural," he said.Kinda says it all.>^uu^<

"Gawrsh! Why don't you carve yourself a slice? Ahuck!"*********************************I can actually HEAR this being said out loud so clearly in my head that it makes all of my nerves GIGGLE--like being tickled!!! Good ole "Bucky"! And he looks so happy to be there! Even though he's DEAD--what a sport!Got a question, though, about little No-Neck there on the salad bar...what the heck is that silvery-looking thing off to the left, pointing at the deer departed like a sort of weapon?Really odd. Maybe a part of another masterpiece? Also, it almost looks like someone stole the little rounded ears off a kid's teddy bear to stick on the deer head. (Maybe that dude from Vt.)Otherwise it's perfectly so-so.

Haha...before I knew of Cake Wrecks I went to a wedding when I was 18 where the couple had several sheet cakes that you get from the grocery store with two green army men shooting at two deer, with one on its side with a pile of blood red icing next to it. I wish I got a picture. But "redneck" isn't such a bad thing I guess. :)

Why is it that groom's cakes always get to show personality and character - I don't mean these specifically - while the "bride's" wedding cake is usually so generic that it's more or less the elevator music equivalent of cake?

Looks like Wedding Cakes I have seen on "my Redneck Wedding" on CMT. I live in South Georgia and know some rednecks, used in the most lovely way, that would not find a darn thing wrong with not one of those cakes. I agree about the one Punk Deer staring, like a dear in the headlights or caught while drunk kids dear shile! Thanks for making my day with a giggle!

Man! Do those lights in the 1st one ever add some PIZZAZZ!!! It looks like it's in a last rites ceremony with fire flies. And you gotta love the bamboo skewer..ahem..arrow protruding from it's side.

The large specimen is done well enough, but it looks like it's slowing sinking into quicksand. By the time the dinner is over, there will only be the tips of the antlers visible!

The absolute BEST one is the bucky the party hat wearin' fella. He seriously made me lmao. I could totally consume some of him...the others, not so much. I have a hard time eating anything that STARES at me.

I could never work out how they got the horse playing Artax to stand neck deep in a puddle of mud and look sad. Surely most horses would be looking pretty darn worried, and trying to get out of the mud...

Oh, and at least they're going for ungulates which are reasonably common and not *terribly* cute. It would be a shame if they made a cake out of a pudu or a dik-dik.

a hunters dream cake.The Society to Save Endangered Species was formed by Fred Smilek and two of his colleagues; Charlie Mack & Jonathan Korny. Fred Smilek stays active in raising awareness for this cause. [www.fredjsmilek.com]

Aren't these simply the continuation of an ancient literary tradition, courtship being likened to the pursuit of the female deer by the male hunter? As in Wyatt...

Whoso list to hunt ? I know where is an hind ! But as for me, alas ! I may no more,The vain travail hath wearied me so sore ;I am of them that furthest come behind.Yet may I by no means my wearied mindDraw from the deer ; but as she fleeth aforeFainting I follow ; I leave off therefore,Since in a net I seek to hold the wind.Who list her hunt, I put him out of doubtAs well as I, may spend his time in vain !And graven with diamonds in letters plain,There is written her fair neck round about ; ' Noli me tangere ; for Cæsar's I am,And wild for to hold, though I seem tame.

I had to leave my desk and retire to the restroom because the buck tooth one made me absolutely hysterical!!! My co-workers thought something bad had happened. If only they understood how good it was......

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