There has been an issue weighing heavy on my heart lately. I understand that our world is in turmoil now. Nations are at war, and there are people in Beverly Hills that cannot afford a 20,000 square foot home and have to settle for a 10,000 square foot home due to the economy. However, I have a selfish request. This mom needs some help from the Big Guy.

I find myself struggling with the nutritional value of frozen pizza, specifically Ellio’s Cheese Pizza. Cardboard covered in artificial tomato sauce smothered in processed cheese is a sad excuse for pizza, I know. Trust me. I was born and bred in northern New Jersey, the home of some of the best pizza in the world. However, try convincing a 7 year-old who runs on carbohydrates and the occasional baby carrot of this fact. See, Lord, I really need for frozen pizza to be the next Super Food. I need it to appear on the Dr. Oz show proclaiming that frozen pizza, alone, can fuel the body and fight disease.

As you look upon our dinner table each night, you see the battle that wages in my kitchen. On most nights, I tell my son, “You will eat what I’ve made for dinner. This is not a restaurant. I do not cook different meals for everyone…blah, blah, blah…” I’m sure you are as bored and irritated with the whole scenario as I am, but you are much more patient than I.

Then there are the nights that I just do not have any fight left in me. Like Rocky without Mickey, I just can’t do it. That is when I thank my good friend Ellio for creating his rectangular frozen pizza. Defeated, I heat up the toaster oven and try to convince myself that one day my child will eat fresh asparagus steamed to perfect tenderness. And smooth, buttery mashed potatoes. I guess it would help if I cooked asparagus and mashed potatoes, but you get my point.

Lord, I want what is best for my dear, sweet, possibly vitamin-deficient child and what is best for him is that I don't lose my mind over dinner every night. He will fare so much better down the road if mommy doesn’t feel the need to eat Xanax like Skittles every day at around 4:30 p.m.