He's Charming--and Single!

Where: Asia de Cuba, The Mondrian Hotel, Los Angeles What they ate: Sushi and chicken club sandwiches, along with iced tea (Billy) and Diet Coke (Carole)

Where: Asia de Cuba, The Mondrian Hotel, Los Angeles What they ate: Sushi and chicken club sandwiches, along with iced tea (Billy) and Diet Coke (Carole)

CAROLE RADZIWILL: Did Simon [Billy's publicist] show you one of my columns?

BILLY CRUDUP: No, but I'm not so fastidious about preparing for interviews.

CR: It's a flirty interview with pictures of us having lunch.

BC: Gotcha. So who pays?

CR: Glamour.

BC: Cool. I'll have the lobster then.

CR: [Laughs.] It's the perfect date. You don't have to pay and there's no awkward sex pressure at the end.

BC: No? Simon said we would definitely be having sex.

CR: [Laughs.] When did you decide to become an actor?

BC: Senior year of college. I have a video of a bad soap opera I did: I've got a sweet mullet, weigh about 250 and I'm terrible.

CR: Let's put it on YouTube!

BC: [Laughs.] I didn't mind making an ass of myself if it meant I got a little attention. Then I discovered I had respect for what actors did, and I wanted to be better.

CR: But speaking of being bad, this overused device of coincidence in films makes me crazy. Why are people always bumping into each other, dropping things and later falling in love?

BC: Doesn't that happen in real life?

CR: No. And why do the love interests always hate each other when they first meet? Have you ever seriously dated someone whom you hated when you first met?

BC: I'm afraid I have, but we didn't bump into each other.

CR: Did you drop anything?

BC: I don't think so.

CR: Because it never happens. It's so corny.

BC: You're going to face a terrible conundrum when you bump into somebody, drop something and it's the man you dreamed of. You'll be like, "I can't date you, it's too cliche." And that's why a movie will never be made about you.

CR: Well, I wouldn't go see that movie anyway. OK, is it better to be famous or Almost Famous?

BC: [Laughs.] You'll have to ask somebody who's been both.

CR: OK. Is it better to be a Big Fish in a small pond or a small fish in a big pond?

BC: I like being a small fish in a big pond.

CR: Is it better to love or to be loved?

BC: Hey, that's not one of my movie titles.

CR: So? It's my question.

BC: [Laughs.] It's better to make yourself available to love and to be loved.

CR: Then I'm going to eat my whole sandwich with chopsticks too. In your new movie, Dedication, Tom Wilkinson's character says the average guy meets 900 women during his mating years. So when is mating season?

BC: I think it starts in January.

CR: And it ends in September, right?

BC: I was going to say February. I'm older now. I have a six-week season, then I need to rest.

CR: [Laughs.] How long have you been single?

BC: About a year. Hey, listen, I'm throwing in a couple of bucks because this was an expensive lunch. [Opens his wallet.] Oh, I don't have any money.

CR: Are you joking?

BC: Seriously, I didn't bring any money.

CR: [Laughs.] This isn't a real date. But you're funny, maybe we'll go on a real one someday.

BC: I went on a date a few weeks ago, and at the end of dinner, the waiter came over and said the restaurant had picked up the check.

CR: You see? It's better to be famous!

Carole Radziwill is the author of What Remains*, published by Scribner, now available in paperback.*