My last Antenatal class was breast feeding and it's left me quite emotional. I know how good breast feeding for baby is and I feel selfish that I'm even doubting it. Im trying to work through my thoughts so much and find a way to get over it and make sure that my baby gets the right start in life but it's leaving me feeling teary. I'm such a private person and publicly breast feeding leaves me feeling uncomfy and it's something I would selfishly struggle with. I know it's the most natural thing and my perception is probably worse that how other perceive it. I've thought of expressing to make sure my baby gets my milk but I've got to express every time baby feeds so really I'd be better feeding straight from the breast. My husband isn't keen on breast feeding as he wants to be able to help but there is a lot of pressure for mum to feed on demand and there's no way for him to relieve me although there are lots of other things he can help with. I mentioned it to my mum & she point blank said I wouldn't want to be doing it & my husbands parents look at me like I'm an alien because I'm still thinking about it. I want to once baby arrives become involved in a mummy & baby group & keep amongst family support to keep prevent me feeling isolated at home when my husband goes back to work but I'd be too self cautious to feed in public & would have to 'disappear' for a fed and feel isolated, no one from my husbands family has breast fed either and they'll will play a big part socially for us as a family. I'm trying to get over this as I know the health benefits for baby. I've been thinking of how I can get over this for the better of my baby. Sorry for the vent ladies.

Sun Mar 02, 2014 5:23 pm

dragoncrazy123

Joined: Sun Aug 04, 2013 2:40 pmPosts: 0

Re: Breast v's Bottle

You need to do what you feel is best for you and baby. There is so much pressure to breast feed but if its not for you it's not for you.

I was the same before I had my daughter I didn't want to breast feed but I felt bullied in to it by the antinatal classes and peer pressure.

I tried for 4 days and my daughter lost too much weight and ended up in hospital - they told me I was so stressed that I wasn't producing any milk and I wouldn't until I started to sleep -eat and drink properly. That was easier said than done as at the time my daughter was very demanding.

So I put her exclusively on the bottle from day 5 - she is now 6 weeks old and much more settled and gaining weight steadily.

For us bottle feeding is the right decision.

Do what you feel us best for you and with any luck you'll get the support you need from family, friends and your midwife/health visitor.

Please don't put yourself under any more pressure trying to do what is expected of you - please do what us right for you. Stress is not good!

Best of luck to you x

Sun Mar 02, 2014 6:42 pm

julietlovesromeo

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 04, 2014 12:21 pmPosts: 4

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Thank you for your experience on breast/bottle feeding. So much emphasis is made on breast being best that i don't want to look like I'm not doing the best for my baby - although bottle formulae is so advanced to meet baby's needs.

Sun Mar 02, 2014 7:59 pm

EmmaG12

Joined: Thu Sep 27, 2012 8:11 pmPosts: 0

Re: Breast v's Bottle

When I found out I was pregnant I said I wanted to breast feed but couldn't do it in public so was goin to express for going out. My little boy came 10days early and my Milk didn't come in for another 24hours. My son was only 5lb 13oz born so was very small so I was concerned. He wouldn't latch on it got to about 12hours after he was born after numerous of midwives squeezing and prodding my boobs and only the tiniest dribble comig out I just begged for a bottle. The midwife who I had asked for a bottle was like fine then give up. I did try again when I got home and manage to express a little bit but not enough to feed my baby. The midwife came round and asked how the breast feeding was going I showed her how much milk I had got out and she was the nicest person to talk about it and said it doesn't work for everyone he's thriving off formula don't stress about It so i decided not to bother trying any longer. It was getting me down ad I felt so guilty when I couldn't do it, but on the flip side of bottle feeding was my partner could take over, get up in the night feed him in the day if I was sleeping. I found it much eaiser going out wth bottles.

It makes me so angry a mother is made to feel guilty if they don't breast feed her child, and there is far to much pressure put on people. I would say do what you and your baby are happy with. If you are relaxed and happy so will your baby. If you get to stressed your baby will pick up on that. Xx

Sun Mar 02, 2014 8:56 pm

danniibabez

ED member

Joined: Sat Dec 15, 2012 11:31 pmPosts: 30

Re: Breast v's Bottle

I Brest feed my lg, I have found loads of Brest feeding rooms wen out and about, but now my lg is 8mths I just sit out the way n put her on the Brest, my oh will help loads wen he's home from work, I'm lucky she took to it but if it didn't work I would of just put her on the bottle

Sun Mar 02, 2014 9:20 pm

zarajolly

ED newbie

Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2013 7:53 pmPosts: 1

Re: Breast v's Bottle

I originally was set on formula, but after seeing it Wa stage fastest way to loose weight and thought about the night feeds, prepping bottles and sterilising all day and night, I thought 'hey, I'll give it a go, I can give up if I don't enjoy it'. I had the same worries about feeding around other people. So I started by doing it with just my mum & OH in the room. Now me and baby have it sorted, and I'll feed him wherever we are, the more I do it, the more confident I get with it.

Mon Mar 03, 2014 2:26 pm

sjc_04

Joined: Thu Nov 15, 2012 7:58 pmPosts: 0

Re: Breast v's Bottle

I was set from day one my baby was goin to be bottle fed and she was and still is.. sterilising is not an issue, anyone can help with feedin! My midwife etc was a for breast but i told her no, in the hosp the midwives were really good and disnt pressure me! I wouldnt have done it anyway.. dont worry about pressure, its a personal preferance and u do whats right for u!! It annoys me so much how pressurisin people are and how breast is best... formula milk is just as good and all the babies that have it are happyand healthy!

Mon Mar 03, 2014 5:15 pm

julietlovesromeo

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 04, 2014 12:21 pmPosts: 4

Re: Breast v's Bottle

I don't want to rule it out completely but at the moment it doesn't feel right for me, although that sounds quite selfish towards my baby but bottle fed just sits better with me and I feel more comfortable with it. Midwives I've spoken to throughout my appointments havent put pressure on me at all but I do feel like they are expecting the 'right' answer

Mon Mar 03, 2014 9:48 pm

zarajolly

ED newbie

Joined: Mon Apr 29, 2013 7:53 pmPosts: 1

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Just do what you feel is right for you. You can switch to bottle at any time if you try breast, but you're limited for how long your milk stays if you don't use it. If its something you are sure you don't want to do, don't do it. It's quite sore for up to the first 2 weeks, not all babies will take to it, and the worst bit is if they get oral thrush. You're limited on how much of some things you can have (eg, fizzy drink, acidic foods and alcohol). But the bonding experience with the first feed especially, it's amazing. If you choose breast though, make sure you have bottles incase it doesn't work out for you. It's not easy, nor is it all brilliant. Formula has one brill added benefit and that's that it has more Vit K than breast, so less Vit k needs to be given to baby.

Mon Mar 03, 2014 10:46 pm

momma2b

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Oct 05, 2013 2:13 pmPosts: 1

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Can totally relate. To this post. Have been struggling with this myself.

My little fella is 4 weeks on Friday and like you I felt unsure what to do initially. I decided to give breast feeding a og and if it worked it worked and if it didn't it didn't but would at least try and give baby the colostrum. As it happens, my son attached very well and feeding went fab for two whole weeks, no soreness and he put on 12oz in a week.

But then, I went to visit my gran one day and left the room to feed my boy, but she is a bit interfering and followed me in and stood over me......I was so embarrassed...I couldn't help it, and for the next day or two my milk slowed (think it was psychological) but it made me realised how uncomfortable I was with it and I felt a little trapped as only felt comfy doing it in the house. After speaking to my lovely health visitor she said many babies don't even get a sniff of breast milk and I had given him a good start with nearly three weeks worth and I had to do what was best for us both...happy mom happy baby etc...

So it still took me a few days to ditch the boob completely cuz I felt so guilty but for three days my son has been totally on the bottle and I am doing much better and he is thriving too.

Soo don't ŵorry to much...why not give it a go like I did and see how you feel. At least then you can say you tried it. Best of luck xxxxx

_________________

Tue Mar 04, 2014 9:02 pm

julietlovesromeo

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 04, 2014 12:21 pmPosts: 4

Re: Breast v's Bottle

At the very least I would like to give baby the colostrum as they say that's the bery best, after that I think if I stay open minded then to have at least considered it and possibly attempted it can set my mind at ease that I didn't rule it out completely and gave it a chance if it works for me and baby or not.

Tue Mar 04, 2014 11:57 pm

Blackkat

Joined: Sat Jun 18, 2011 11:28 pmPosts: 0

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Why not give it a go & see how it works for you. I was worried about feeding in public but once I practised sat in front of a mirror a few times I realised that actually barely anything is on show (less than if you were wearing a bikini on a beach!). & just because your husband isn't feeding your baby there are so many other ways for him & other family to be involved. At the end of day it seems like you're getting pressure from both sides (breast from professionals & formula from family). At the end of the day it has to be a decision that you & your husband fully agree on. If I were you I would try it see how you feel as it's easier to switch from breast to formula but very hard to switch from formula to breast. Good luck in whatever you decide.

Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:48 pm

julietlovesromeo

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 04, 2014 12:21 pmPosts: 4

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Thank you. I have joined (just in fb at the moment) my local breast feeding group, have checked out books (although no book is ever the same) and I want to at least try, if it doesn't work then I want to express, although not sure how expressing works in reality. As a ftm it all seems so confusing as you try and do what is best for baby and you and take on all these facts & opinions from mw, friends and family.

Mon Apr 14, 2014 11:43 am

kme83

ED frequent user

Joined: Tue Jul 02, 2013 5:01 pmPosts: 108

Re: Breast v's Bottle

Mixed feeding is also a option.My daughter is 6 weeks old, i wanted to exclusively breast feed and i did for the first 10 days but i wasn't producing enough milk and she lost weight so i gave her a bottle of formula. Since then i have carried on mixed feeding, i express 3 or 4 bottles of breast milk per day, she also has a few little feeds from my breast and has 3 or 4 formula bottles in the evening/night. This method works well for us and she is now a healthy weight.

Thu Apr 17, 2014 2:53 pm

julietlovesromeo

ED newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 04, 2014 12:21 pmPosts: 4

Re: Breast v's Bottle

I like that idea kme that's sounds ideal, how does your schedule work for when you feed & express ?