help I need a man perspective please

Sorry to invade your man cave, I just need a little help!!! I recently lost a baby at 10 wks which was hard for me and my DH. I am finally feeling normal and am over all the after affects of losing the baby and am ready to resume my regular activities ie sex!! During the time I was unable to partake in this activity I made sure my DH was very well taken care of via BJ. Now that I am up to par per say it seems like he is not interested in making love to me and would much rather get a BJ or just go to sleep. I have asked him why and he says he is just exhausted. (Which I can completely understand because he works a lot and is currently on call.). I feel like maybe I'm being selfish or childish it's just that I miss our connection. I miss being close to and with him. Did any of you guys withdraw from intimacy after suffering a lose or after your child was born? Do you have any advice on how to handle this situation???? Thanx for the help and I'm sorry again for invading your space!!!

Sorry to invade your man cave, I just need a little help!!! I recently lost a baby at 10 wks which was hard for me and my DH. I am finally feeling normal and am over all the after affects of losing the baby and am ready to resume my regular activities ie sex!! During the time I was unable to partake in this activity I made sure my DH was very well taken care of via BJ. Now that I am up to par per say it seems like he is not interested in making love to me and would much rather get a BJ or just go to sleep. I have asked him why and he says he is just exhausted. (Which I can completely understand because he works a lot and is currently on call.). I feel like maybe I'm being selfish or childish it's just that I miss our connection. I miss being close to and with him. Did any of you guys withdraw from intimacy after suffering a lose or after your child was born? Do you have any advice on how to handle this situation???? Thanx for the help and I'm sorry again for invading your space!!!

to be honest he is probably scared of it happening again. I would suggest doing something that leads from one thing to another. or maybe even having him get on some of the boards on here or possibly seeking some professional assistance. (Sry I hate calling it help or counseling). but give him some time and just talk with him

to be honest he is probably scared of it happening again. I would suggest doing something that leads from one thing to another. or maybe even having him get on some of the boards on here or possibly seeking some professional assistance. (Sry I hate calling it help or counseling). but give him some time and just talk with him

Thanx for the insight. I think i will ask if he would be interested in checking out the boards. Had not thought of that before. I have tried to talking to him but he keeps saying he is fine. He is a very private person and doesn't really express his feelings well. I was thinking he might be scared but doesn't want to admit it at least not to me because he has been so strong and supportive for me throughout this whole process. I love him so much and just want to show him that I appreciate him and cherish everything that he has done for me and my DD. . Thanx again for listening.

Thanx for the insight. I think i will ask if he would be interested in checking out the boards. Had not thought of that before. I have tried to talking to him but he keeps saying he is fine. He is a very private person and doesn't really express his feelings well. I was thinking he might be scared but doesn't want to admit it at least not to me because he has been so strong and supportive for me throughout this whole process. I love him so much and just want to show him that I appreciate him and cherish everything that he has done for me and my DD. . Thanx again for listening.

It's only been a few weeks which is why I feel kind of childish about asking you guys. I know everyone reacts differently to lose. And I know this has been hard for him. He never wanted children ever. Has alwyz been very adamant about that. Though he has been very loving and nurturing towards my DD and is the only father she knows (hers hasn't been around for years). This was a surprise BC pregnancy. He was very supportive when we found out and was even getting excited about the prospect of being a father. After we were told our baby never developed he was the one that sat me down and said he want to try again. That he had changed his mind about having his own child and is looking forward to the possibility of trying again. I am starting to believe that you and the other dad are right. I think that as much as he wants to try again he is afraid of having the same outcome and/or afraid of me hurting again.he is an amazing man and I just want to make him happy. I am going to try to be more patient and understanding. Thanks guys for your outlook an perspective on this matter.

It's only been a few weeks which is why I feel kind of childish about asking you guys. I know everyone reacts differently to lose. And I know this has been hard for him. He never wanted children ever. Has alwyz been very adamant about that. Though he has been very loving and nurturing towards my DD and is the only father she knows (hers hasn't been around for years). This was a surprise BC pregnancy. He was very supportive when we found out and was even getting excited about the prospect of being a father. After we were told our baby never developed he was the one that sat me down and said he want to try again. That he had changed his mind about having his own child and is looking forward to the possibility of trying again. I am starting to believe that you and the other dad are right. I think that as much as he wants to try again he is afraid of having the same outcome and/or afraid of me hurting again.he is an amazing man and I just want to make him happy. I am going to try to be more patient and understanding. Thanks guys for your outlook an perspective on this matter.

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