Tuesday, 21 April 2009

How big a part does humiliation play in a spanking, is it positive or negative, and is it real humiliation or just the feeling of it, I wonder how others find it.

Why do I ask? Because I experienced it recently and I rather liked it but as the matter at hand was serious I don't think I should have. Liked it, that is.

We were at the office Sunday morning, not a regular date at all, but we're shifting some old files, which we have to keep for so many years, to a new location, it requires quite a bit of sorting, we're also trashing the oldest stuff so it's a job best done when the rest of the offices aren't in, easy access to shredding and the bulk waste bin has plenty of space.

Now I'd managed to trash a whole year of stuff which we're supposed to keep, we do have most of the stuff online but some of the files contain signatures and original docs, I can't remember ever having to refer back to any of them but P was mad because he said if ever we were audited or challenged legally over something we might need them. Possibly I suppose, that's his dept not mine, but it was not intentional at all and no point being mad at me. Anyway I made some flippant comment about he could always visit the waste bin and retrieve the shreds if he was that bothered, we'd got plenty of sticky tape and pritt stick, he didn't think that was funny, the exchange escalated a bit and I told him not to be so bloody childish what's done is done.

It always gets P when I take that sort of attitude and it rebounded on me of course, he dragged me over to his desk, bent me over it, took my jeans down and spanked me really hard with his hand, I struggled and told him to stop which he didn't, then I told him to bloody well stop I wasn't in the mood and I tried to get up but the 13st channelled through his left arm is quite hard to struggle against then he told me if I didn't keep still he'd take his cane to me, all the time still spanking, my knickers then came down and he finished off with a volley of superhard spanks which really made me gasp. He let me up and turned me round to face him, jeans and knickers still round my ankles, and then he lectured me on why the files were so important and why he was concerned, he made it sound very convincing and then he told me it was my attitude which had really peed him off. He kept telling me to look up not at the floor while he was telling me off and he wouldn't let me pull my pants and jeans up until he'd finished, I just had to stand there with a smarting backside and take it. When he'd finished pontificating he told me to pull my pants up and get on with the job we'd come to do, just matter of fact as if nothing had happened. Talk about infuriating, he has a way of doing that and I don't have a way of responding other than doing it.

Three hours later were sitting having a snack and a pint in a local pub just chatting away and I was getting that warm toasty feeling I get after a put-in-place spanking which has no obvious or immediate sexual context. I was thinking isn't it nice I can still feel embarrassed in front of my husband after so many years, and also how deeply affected I can be by the humiliation of having to stand half undressed blushing at both ends while the man I love sets me straight.

WOW! That tale has me re-thinking taking a break from spanking. I'd love to see Dante be that openly dominant and also interested in me and what I'm doing these days!

But as for the humiliation factor, that still causes me a lot of angst. Back in earlier days of our relationship, Dante did a lot of things just for the sole (or at least primary) purpose of humiliating me. It was reasonably ok at the time, but back then, I didn't even like myself very much, so that makes sense. Now things like that, done ONLY for the intent of humiliating me, just rub the wrong way all together.

But that's quite different from what P did... a whole world apart, and THAT kind of humiliation is something I think we all can benefit from in more ways than one from time to time! Thanks for the warm fuzzies!

Davey does that, he orders me to explain why I got spanked, and discuss how to avoid it in future... while I am standing there bareassed...in fact, he often makes me grip my sore ass real hard and pinch it, which really hurts, and I am not allowed to let go till he has finished his lecture...and woe betide me if I do not maintain eye contact! Yes, it is incredibly humiliating, and OMG sexy! sexy! sexy! (but don't tell him!!!) LOL

humiliation.. I do understand why a scene like that in private would feel good... it's public humiliation I hate... and I've seen it done in public and that upsets me.. in private something like this can be mmmmmmmm...

Cheekycherry - yes I do love it when P takes the lead and yes he does address the matter when I am in the wrong :)

M:e, lovely to see you. It happened to me before but whenever I've tried to design it, it doesn't happen, it is a curious mix and in different circumstances I'm sure It would be very undignifying.

Tiggs, hello, I know what you mean Tiggs there are different scales of humiliations and the circumstances in which it's applied can make all the difference.

Lothianne - thank you very much. I didn't know you knew P, yes he does snores LOL

Daisy hiya, I'm not letting P read your comment, your be giving him extra ideas LOL. The eye contact does it for me.

Grace - I think so, no I know so but sometimes take it for granted too much thought I try not to.

PK - that happens to me as well. Thank you, I think you kow how I feel about P :)

Kitten - hello, oh yes I certainly do know what you mean.I enjoyed answering Tiggs questions. We get to know a little bit more about the person behind the blog.

Lessa - Oh I totally agree with you, private humiliation is fine but public humiliation has no place for me and P wouldn't do it. When you think about it you see quite a lot of it around you in different ways. It makes me angry when mothers humiliate their children in the streets, that I cannot stand.

Constance - hello, thank you for stopping by. As for pontificating I choose the word knowingly, pretty sure P hasn't read it but if he did and it provoked a response then I would have to cross that bridge at the time, I do play with fire a bit sometimes.

I really do appreciate you all stopping by and taking the time to comment.

I believe humiliation plays a very important part in any spanking given to a naughty woman. Standing her in the corner, showing her pubic area when her knicker's are taken down. Also having other people watching her being spanked.