In part 2 of ‘depression in a new light’, I will talk more about the state of depression…giving you a different ‘light’ on day to day life stuff that can cause someone to feel depressed.

What is the state of depression all about? Some of the dictionary definitions of depression are…a depressed or sunken place or part; a hollow; a condition of general emotional dejection and withdrawal; sadness greater and more prolonged than that warranted by any objective reason; a mood disorder; the action of lowering something or pressing something down; severe, typically prolonged, feelings of despondency and dejection; self doubt creeps in and that swiftly turns to depression. One internet site says depression is a complicated mental illness that can take the joy out of once pleasurable things and has a dramatic affect on a person’s life.

When we look at the explanation of depression…it may be safe to say we have felt depressed somewhere in our life.

Like any illness or disease, people just don’t become depressed over night! The feelings causing someone to feel depressed have been there for a while.

There was an amazing post on facebook the other day, ‘Depression, anxiety and panic attacks are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of having to stand strong for too long.’ How many people in your life have ‘fought’ the battle too long? You may be one of them. People stand so strong – energetically – holding things together – being the strong one….and one day their world falls apart. Where is the strength or the strong in them at that time?

Medically they say depression has to do with a chemical imbalance in the brain. That is a ‘physical’ explanation. We aren’t just physical beings. We have a body mind and a spirit – you can’t function one without the other. They all work together. The non-physical part of you is your mind and your spirit which play a huge part in what causes depression. Your mind has to do with thoughts and emotions; your spirit has to do with being at rest or unrest! What you are feeling can’t be seen ‘physically’. You can’t look at your arm and say, ‘oh there is my depression, I’ll just take it off my arm and I’m done with it.’

I’m always talking about how our bodies are messengers for us – giving us messages. When it comes to depression, the imbalance in the brain, what message is the brain giving the person with depression?

When did the depression start? What was going on in that person’s life at the time? Let’s look at the different aspects of our day to day life to see where an imbalance can show up.

A person is in a long term marriage or relationship. All of a sudden the partner leaves unexpectedly! Would that cause an imbalance in the family dynamics taking the joy out of life?

A person has been dedicated to their job for so long, putting in many hours, leading many teams and all of a sudden they are asked to move on or leave the company. Would that cause an imbalance where a person would or wouldn’t fit into life now?

People can have imbalances in their finances – lose a house or an investment; imbalance in their relationships – the feelings in their ‘heart’ so to speak; imbalance within themselves – everyone is out to get them or everything falls back on them. People can have a physical body trauma happen causing an emotional breakdown – for example, breaking a leg and not being able to teach dancing or not getting to exercise for a long period of time. Would that cause an imbalance? Any one of these everyday life mishaps can cause someone to become depressed. Why is it some people do into deep depression and some people don’t? How is the imbalance serving them?

People move through all kinds of challenges in their life…someone who is depressed is ‘moving through the expression of depression as part of their journey. In the movement, they will experience ‘healing’ within.

The imbalance may be physically represented in the brain…but the imbalance stems from the imbalance in the MIND! The mind is very powerful and will put someone at unrest in no time. There are a number of elements that come into play when it comes to working with a depressed person. A shift in perception is one of them.

Depressed people don’t get up in the morning and think about how they can be depressed all day. They are ‘moving through’ whatever this depression is bringing them to deal with. The depression can bring them isolation…can challenge them on all their belief systems…can close the door on some relationships and open the door on other relationships. Depression, like other sicknesses, illnesses or pains of some kind can also be used to manipulate others to get what they want. All of these are examples of the kind of healing that can take place inside of someone. They are experiencing life through the emotional state of depression.

Sometimes people have to hit ‘rock bottom’ in the moving forward process. Put another way, they have to let go of the fight and the battle that they have been fighting for so long! One example of this could be the fight and battle around keeping ‘up their appearances.’ When someone finally can’t keep up the appearance of always being the strong one…it could be pretty hard to let that appearance go. For so long, their feelings could have been buried deep down inside…do we really know what they are feeling?

Now go back to the role we play in a depressed person’s life…ask them ‘how they feel’ about whatever they are saying. When they answer, don’t have any judgement at all. Their feelings are about them and how they feel NOT ABOUT YOU. Even if they say it’s because of you, don’t ‘buy into it.’ Keep moving the conversation forward asking them questions about what makes them feel the way they feel. Again, this is about them and how they feel. They will tend to blame everything around them at first…and that is very normal. That will be their perception of the reality of what they feel has taken place in their life. There are many influences causing people to feel what they feel. Eventually it will be inside where they find their answers. That is where the movement with questions can help them to ‘heal through their depression’ and see life in a new light!

I’m from the province of the greatest football fans in the world. Last night the Riders lost another football game. While we were listening to the game on the radio with family and friends, I witnessed people getting all upset about what was going on in the game. They were upset about the plays that were called by the coach, missed catches and penalty after penalty definitely added to the frustration. I asked one person who was very emotional, ‘what bothers you about them playing like that?’ They replied, ‘we’re missing the ball and we can’t even kick a field goal.’ In that moment, I could feel the energy! This person was literally in the game with the players and was literally trying to make things happen.

As I was lying in bed this morning, I thought about that experience with the group last night. It made me think…how are we at handling our own teams in life? How are we at playing with our own players and calling our own plays? You bet it is so much easier calling the plays for others…been there!

We have teams that naturally form, like our families, birth and through marriage. We have teams that come together, like the co-workers in our jobs or members of the different associations we belong to. We have teams that we create through our business like our clients, for example. Then we have the team where we are all part of the collective humanity. All of these teams involve players of all kinds.

Do you always get to choose who you want on your team? Did you choose your family? Did you choose your clients? Regardless if you do or don’t, how do you play with the members of your team?

Everyone on your team has a special gift or talent. If you were going to play a game with them, what ‘game’ would you pick them as your partner? If there was a contest with a great prize for the team who knew the most about country and western singers, my mom would be the first person I would pick to be on my team. That lady knows so much about country and western singers, it blows me away. If there was a contest with a great prize for a physical sport of some kind, my mom would be the very last person I would pick. Does that make my mom not a good team player? Does that make my mom a looser? My mom, like the other players in my life, has amazing gifts and talents. She may not be the best person to compliment another person, but she sure can sew an amazing wedding gown.

Every person in your life right now is on one team or another…maybe even many teams. It may not be your team and it doesn’t matter. What matters is the teams you pick to play on. Are you finding the team that is right for you or are you still trying to play on someone else’s team…someone else’s team that no longer brings out your gifts and talents? Are you playing like a team player and are you calling your own plays? Is your team fun to play with….or are you on that team to win? Every team offers us learning; every player offers us learning….what have you learned from your teams lately?