June 6, 2016

writer?

i've been employed in positions that included a lot of professional writing. i have written a few scripts. i have a profile on upwork for freelance writing opportunities. i've had this blog for years and continue to write my thoughts and ideas. even with all that, i still feel uncomfortable calling myself a writer.

are my articles even any good? am i any good? i looked back on my writing samples and edited and changed all of them, because the writer i was then was pretty bad and i saw a lot of ways to improve those articles. which is good, that shows me i have grown as a writer. i've improved. but still, am i "allowed" to call myself that? i feel like there should be a right ("wright" ;)) of passage that i need to pass before i can call myself one.

i talk a big talk when it comes to screenwriting, but really, i don't know much. as i am working on my current script, self doubt infects my fingers. i'm not funny enough. i don't understand character well enough. i don't write enough jokes in each scene. i know story. that i have confidence in. but i want education, i want to gain knowledge. i want to take a course and learn from a professor. bounce ideas off of other students. i would love to get a certificate or a masters in screenwriting, but is that really practical? not really.

it is very annoying for the poor soul who watches tv with me. that pour soul is taran. i pause, rewind, and talk a lot while watching tv. i've never viewed watching tv as a passive act, but an engaging way to learn about human character, life, and most of all, writing.

watching any comedy, i have to know who wrote the episode. the writer is always listed right before director and after all the producers. once i know who the writer is, i pause the show and look them up on imdb. i have all the writers for the mindy project memorized just like i do for modern family, and 30 rock. i study the shows i watch intently, i have a hard time sitting back and relaxing. i can do that with drama, i'm not a drama writer, but not with comedy.

am i a writer because of how much i study and learn? am i a writer simply because i love it and i do it consistently? or are you a writer once you get paid for it? i don't think that's true, because what about the writers who write novels and are trying to get published like lindsay?? they haven't been paid for that yet and people who write novels are definitely writers.

i should take out a flower and pull off its petals while saying "writer. not writer" and see which petal i land with. maybe that's the only way to know.

2 comments:

If you're writing, then you're a writer. Getting paid for it, or recognized for it, or even getting comments on our writing isn't why we writers write. "I write for the same reason I breathe- because if I didn't, I would die." -Isaac Asimov

I think it's great to be a writer and I want to try writing too. But maybe later because now I'm a little bit busy and I ask http://www.essaywriters.reviews/ to help me with this task. But I want to note that it's very cozy and you have more free time.