Blog

The Shortcut to Bliss

We all have our own definitions of bliss. Regardless of the circumstances, bliss means you’re present enough to completely accept what is and experience the flow of love. It’s as if everything has aligned for that perfect moment.

Thus, the common denominators of bliss: connection and presence.

Another word for this is “integrity” (my favorite word!), meaning keeping your promises to yourself and others, so much so that that blissful moment is the culmination of your alignment with your word.

Knowing the power, freedom, and bliss that emerge from integrity encourages us to ruthlessly adhere to our word. Personally, it’s my mission to live with integrity.

Recognize, however, that there are infinite promises that that may conflict. For instance, I make promises to myself to run a loving, successful business, while making promises to friends and family about time commitments. Sometimes I have to choose which word to keep.

This is where the shortcut to bliss comes in: we must be wary not to collapse integrity and morality—making the “good” choices, doing the “right thing.” Integrity is not this. Integrity means you and your actions are aligned with what you stand for, allowing you to be whole and complete. Something is aligned or it isn’t. You either arrived at 5:00PM or you didn’t. Period, without saying you’re actions are good, bad, right or wrong.

The shortcut to bliss is awareness and forgiveness. When you don’t keep your word, which will inevitably happen, instead of blaming and shaming yourself, acknowledge and own what word you are keeping.

A couple of months ago, I gave my word to an incredible woman in Ontario to host an event. Let’s call her Abby. The two of us dove head first into sponsorships, venues, and charities. We both were stressed and frustrated with how to put it together.

Finally, when I crunched the numbers, I saw that we were in over our heads. My stress was a sign of moving in the wrong direction: I couldn’t keep my word to myself regarding a successful business and create a successful event. The frustration was pointing me to the fact that this wasn’t going to work.

Knowing that I’d had to break my word to Abby sparked a flood of shame: I’m a bad person because I broke my word; I’m a failure; I’m inauthentic; I’m flaky, etc. With shame, defeat and fatigue ensued.

Then I saw the real breakdown of integrity: treating myself with such hate. Integrity became a “should,” another thing on the to-do list, instead of an inspiring possibility for growth. I had collapsed morality and integrity and the result was destruction.

My awareness of the misalignment began the shortcut back to bliss. Becoming aware and forgiving the broken promise, allowed me to realign with my promise to myself. When I approached Abby with the news, I was able to confidently express the break of integrity and my solution. Her response was nothing short of loving understanding.

So how does this story about integrity relate to your blissful first sip of coffee? To be present in that moment, aligning everything – yourself, your actions, and your thoughts – requires your awareness and forgiveness. Bliss occurs when it all comes together: self-love, integrity, and presence. The shortcut is loving yourself enough to release the judgment.