Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Few things could cause me to be more irritated than some events that happened today.

My morning was good. The first job of the day was virtually uneventful unless I count the totally useless meeting that I attended which kept me late at work. I will not get into it fully, but I will say a marketing plan for 2008 turned out to be a chat fest about new software we should try…a total waste of time.

After I left the office, I headed to the frame shop, hoping to get some work done and get Julie out of the weeds, and I ended up spending a fair amount of time trying to discipline a completely out of control dog. I love dogs (I love, love, love dogs!), I don’t mind training them, but everyone around me just ignored the bad behavior, making this one of the most irritating situations I have been in for quite some time. This dog barked a full 5 hours that I was there (less when I started to try to discipline him), and everyone just ignored it, including his owner. As I sit here now, I can say with complete assuredness that this dog’s behavior could have easily rivaled a screaming, temper-tantrumed 3 year old.

When I got to the shop, I was so hungry I had to get some lunch, and I made a mistake. I had a chicken Caesar salad that did not agree with me to the point of cold sweats, nausea, and green/pale face. I would have been better off not eating at all. I thought it may have been mild food poisoning, but it could have been homemade Caesar dressing with raw egg. I cannot eat egg. Mustn’t eat egg.

So, now I sit here in front of this useless laptop, trying to get a connection to the ‘inter-web’. I am using all my self control not to whip this piece of metal across the room and out the window. In fact, if it was summertime out there right now, I just might have entertained that idea a bit more. I just hate the cold so much that I would like to keep the windows intact.

Thanks to Microsoft Word, I have the ability to write about my irritation while it is still fresh in my mind, and fresh at my fingers. I will now attempt to get on the internet once again for the 40th time tonight so I may post this babble. Wish me luck.

Update: I could not get on the internet after three long drawn-out attempts. I will have to post this tomorrow, if in fact I can get some kind of connection then. For now, I suppose I can just go up to the bathroom and stare at the hole in the tiles on the back side of the shower.

Update #2: Make that 4 long drawn-out attempts.

Update #3: As you can see, I finally acheived a connection. I don't expect it to last for long.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Today, we had a plumber in to look at our bathroom leak that has been a thorn in our side for the past month or so. Showers recently consisted of Scott preparing the rear end of the fixtures with a 'vitamin water' bottle outfitted with a funnel to catch the drip (inside the wall). The drip was not always a drip, sometimes it was a stream.

After three tub re-caulking jobs dutifully undertaken by Scott, we realized we needed a real plumber to fix this.

Turned out we needed a new valve. The valve in place was horribly corroded, getting worse every day (every shower). Could the financial squeeze get worse after all the money we have already spent to help Perry? Yes, it could, and it did.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

I plan on spending the day making jewelry for the Big Holiday Sale on Saturday at the gallery.

Scott is working, and the family we usually go to celebrate thanksgiving with is off on a cruise somewhere. I am actually relieved to have the day to myself. I think I will sleep late and wake up and make jewelry in my jammies.

I do have a meal planned.We are having Roasted Chicken with thyme, lemon and garlic. Accompanying that chicken will be roasted carrots, potatoes, onions and more garlic. Yummmm!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

I asked a fellow etsy seller if she could make an urn for Perry, and this is what she made. When I found the listing, I wasn't expecting the personalization, I love the 'Perry' tag. I love EarthElements shop.

There are times when I forget Perry is gone.Mostly when I wake up and go sleepily to let him out, or when I make a loud noise like dropping something heavy and cringe and go look to see where he is. He didn't like loud noises.But no times do I miss him more than when I am cooking. He was always underfoot waiting for something to drop...especially spinach.That silly dog tripped me up so much when I was cooking that I don't know what to do with all the space I have now.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Perry was a very sketchy dog, not very trusting at first, and always shaking.He shook from the minute we picked him out, to the second he made peace with this world. His entire life, start to finish, shook.

The shaking was constant through all of his 11 years. I will never know if this was because of something that happened in his life, or just because.

He was very afraid of some things when we first got him. Brooms for one. The first time I picked a broom up in his presence, he cowered and I put the broom away.

He wouldn't go into the basement for the first 2 years he lived with us, in fact, he would stay far away from the open door for a while.

One thing that really upsets me is the fact that Perry cowered at the sight of Scott's gun when he took it out of it's holster (which he does on an almost daily basis). The first time, we both thought, "why should a dog be that afraid of a gun". We started thinking that a dog afraid of a gun must have had some horrible incident with one, one which is burned into his little doggy memory. This never repaired itself. He was always afraid of guns. I feel so terrible that I couldn't quell his fear of guns.

Ultimately, he did start going into the basement, and stopped being afraid of brooms. The gun thing, he never got over.

He never stopped shaking either. I secretly called him 'Shakes McGee'. Ok, not so secretly. I don't know how many people ever heard me call him that, but he knew I was talking about him when he heard me say it.

Ok, so the shaking was not all that bad. We called it the 'stripper dance', he was very good at it. He was prescribed some medication for his shaking years and years ago, to calm him down... I gave it to him once. He was not a pill popping dog, he prefered to be natural. The one and only time I gave him 'that medication' he acted drunk and surley, I felt horrible. He never had it again.

We adopted Perry on September 2, 1996 when he was approximately 8 months old.I say approximately because Scott and I are Perry's 4th owners, so we never did get a proper history for him. We never knew his true breed, his true birthday, or what horrible things happened to him before we finally met.

At the pound, he was the quietest one in the room. He just sat there and looked at us while all the dogs in the other kennels were barking hysterically to be picked. He had a stupid look on his face, and he was panting.

I asked to see him, and they opened the gate. I got down on my knees and pet him while he quietly took the love. He was easily the cutest doggy in the room. Right then I needed him. We looked at other dogs, but I kept thinking of the quiet one. I told Scott I wanted that one. He agreed.

Perry's name was not always Perry. He probably had a few names before his last. When we adopted him, his name was something that had been shortened to Peli, I think it was Italian.

Scott and I were so pleased to have adopted a dog that we felt the need to take him to our friend Kevin's new house to visit on the way home. Perry was trying to climb in the front seat, and would not stop looking out the front windshield. Scott was trying to drive, and getting really perturbed. Forgetting the name of this new dog in his backseat, Scott yelled "Perry! Back!" And Perry listened, and so he was named.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

I just recently re-discovered Trader Joe's.Well, I never really discovered Trader Joe's, but have shopped there a few times over the years, but their markets are too far out of my way to be a regular stop.Not anymore.Thanks to my new job in Needham, I get to drive by a Trader Joe's 4 days a week.

I am very pleased so far with the quick meal solutions I have found there.Tonight we had tamales for dinner from the frozen section. They were great! A few days ago we tried the marinated Mahi-mahi, delicious.

Today, we also tried an Irish Cheddar with porter. Very daunting looking cheese, but fantastic.So many different cheeses to try, I think I'll get a new one every week.

Ok, so not only does Trader Joe's have easy, interesting, good for you foods, but they are also inexpensive. Tonights meal of tamales and black beans totaled approximately $5.20...for the two of us! That's half the price of any fast food, and way better!

Friday, November 09, 2007

Well, I haven't as of yet.Pieces are still everywhere, probably will be until we are ready to pick them up.

Scott and I did have a few good laughs tonight thanks to Suzanne's comment on the previous post.

'Zaipoopish' was a favorite toy of Perry's which he ripped apart, but loved so much that he knew the name. He would pick this toy out of a dozen if I called for it.It was a ridiculous looking multi colored humanish form with rope hair. Very sturdy, and lasted a long time. I named it after a crazy Tom Waits song called 'Kommienezuspadt', it seemed to fit. I looked through all my pictures, and sadly I have no picture of Zaipoopish. He will just remain in my memory, and Suzanne's apparently. I have no idea how to embed a song on this blog, if I did, you would hear the strangest song ever.

That along with the terrifying 'at times' tuck and run, Perry was truly a character. Scott reminisced tonight about a time that Erik was over and Perry was in a rare form of 'tuck and run'. The most exciting, terrifying type running around you can imagine. He actually tucked his butt under himself and ran around at high speed. This particular evening, Erik was sitting on the couch and Perry was in such high gear, he actually ran 'around' Erik. Yes, up the couch, around the back of the couch (where Erik was sitting), and down the other side. Erik is lucky to have his life.

Thank you Suzanne, this is what we should be focusing on now. The happiness, the good times, the tuck and runs. Zaipoopish!

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

I hear his barking when I come home.I hear his collar jangling when I open a snack.I hear his toenails clicking on the hardwood floor when the house is silent.I hear him walking up the stairs when I am in bed.

I woke up this morning at 5am sobbing.I miss him so much. So much. There are no words.

******The title is intended to discourage anyone who is easily upset, especially at work. I read this again before posting, and I blubbered once again. Blubbering seems to be something I am very good at right now.******

I have been breaking out in full blown breath gasping tears tonight, most of the night. It began with Suzanne's sobbing while we drove off with her P-love, and never stopped. I am just a mess. Not your fault Suzanne, in fact, I am so sorry. I love him, too.

This is Perry's last night, and for him it is not proving to be a good one. He has been having mucus diarrhea all night, a couple of times at J&S's house and 3 times so far at home, and most recently vomiting which is what sent me into such a state of blubbering. Thankfully, all occured outside.

After the vomit episode, I forced a nausea pill into his mouth and got it down. I had decided earlier that I was not going to give him any more pills, but after the vomiting, I thought he may be better off with this one in him. I hope it makes the night easier for him.

My baby is so sick, he is going to heaven tomorrow and I can't stop crying.

I will probably not sleep at all. I am staying downstairs on the couch where I can be close to him.

My face is hot and red and blotchy, nose raw, and my eye sockets are twice the normal size, but I digress. This isn't about me.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

My ipod is broken. I have to take it to an apple shop very soon, since I don't have a warrenty on it and it was purchased at the beginning of December (Sweet gift from hubby). It decided all by itself that I only need music coming out of the left earpod. Yeah, I checked three different headphones with it...it is the ipod, not the earpods.

Anyway, I was listening to some of my favorite music on the laptop with my ipod earpods (which sound great, btw, out of both ears) tonight, and I realized that Demon Days is an album that I associate with taking Perry for a walk. We like the progression, the beats and the cadence...good dog walking album, if I may say so myself. It gives big steps and a swift walk.

Perry has completely lost any interest in eating. He is not feeling well at all. I am trying to keep my cool, chalking it up to friday's very aggressive treatment. He still has interest in food, just no interest in eating.This afternoon I came home to an accident in the kitchen, a small one since he hasn't eaten much in the last few days. After I cleaned that up, I had to force feed him his pills. Something I only recently started to do since he stopped taking pills in food. I hate doing that. I have to pry his mouth open, get my whole hand in there, place the pill as far to the back as I can, and then close his mouth and keep his head up until he swallows. The strange thing is, I do this with two hands, so I am not holding him there, he just stays there all by himself. I am wondering if he is losing his fight. I wish he could speak. We shared a hug filled, petting, and crying time today. He knows I love him, he doesn't leave my side these days.

Today was the Women In Business Open House at the Elks club in Norwood.We didn't have a very good turn out, but I managed to do okay. Actually I did quite well considering I didn't expect to sell anything. I sold two necklaces, two bracelets and two pairs of earrings. I consider that a success. I also gave out a lot of cards and spoke to a lot of people who were interested in my stuff.One woman I met runs a walking house tour in Norwood every year around christmas time, she asked me if I would be willing to give her some jewelry items for her to sell at the end of the tour. Last year their were over 140 people, this year she expects 150-200 people. I am totally IN. She relies on ticket sales, so she wants no compensation for selling my (or anyone elses) stuff. How could I turn this down? I can't. I think the walk/sale is on December 8th this year. I have to re-check that date, but I figure I have about 1 month to get my shit together for it.

Friday, November 02, 2007

We are home from the oncology center.Perry behaved very good for this treatment, another iv one. This one took 10 minutes to administer as opposed to the usual couple of minutes. He needed a shot to combat nausea, as this treatment is known to cause dogs to vomit. There was no vomiting, thank the lucky stars.

There was, however, diarrhea on the ride to the treatment. Yeah, you heard that right. IN MY CAR! Thankfully only on the blanket. I could have killed us both trying to keep him away from that side of the backseat while I was driving. I was almost in tears.After the treatment, Jessica gave us another blanket for the backseat, thanks Jess.He just slept most of the ride home.

So, we need to make an appointment with our regular vet to get bloodwork done next friday. No oncology visit next week. We are now on the every two weeks plan, for the time being.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Perry is not doing so well today.He hardly ate, I had a hard time getting his meds into him. He spit out deli ham! Unbelieveable.

I woke up this morning to diarrhea again in the kitchen (good thing we confine him at night these days) but this diarrhea was unlike the norm. This was very mucussy (is that a word?). It was like thick brown stinky spit. Much different from other messes I have had to clean up. Yes, more bad news. Sorry.

Tomorrow after work, I take him to the NEVOG for his 5th chemo treatment which will be the most aggressive one yet. I am trying to be optomistic. He is done with the weekly treatments, so now it will be once every two weeks for a while. If we see no improvement in the next two weeks from tomorrows treatment, well, you know. I hate to say it.