My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.
My wife asked, "Do you know her?"
"Yes," I sighed, "She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" said my wife, "Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?"