Such fun to be had

April 15, 2014 1:00 am

I stopped playing with trains and dressing up as Batman some considerable time ago. Approaching 60, I no longer play with water guns either.

On Saturday afternoon, 20 metres from my home and laden with shopping, I expressed my displeasure at being liquidated by a disrespectful Thai youth. "Zip up your mouth you old killjoy" some of you may say, perhaps correctly, but surely I do have a right to remain dry if I wish - don't I? However, being then approached unawares from behind, I managed to put down my bags, but was never going to be a match for this fit young Thai kick-boxer. I was visciously and painfully punched to the ground and continuously and aggressively kicked on the roadway. A small group of Thai ladies eventually came to my aid and I thank them enormously; all the men stood by at a safe distance and watched, then disappeared. I ended up with a bleeding face, broken glasses, torn brand new clothes, head to toe bruising and extreme back trauma. Delayed nausea, headache and an eye problem ensure that a trip to the hospital is now necessary.

I was advised to make a report to the police and somehow managed to force an ironic smile. "This is Thailand" were the parting words of my deranged attacker as he stomped off into the sunlight with his girlfriend. It sure is - the modern face of 21st-century Thailand in its full "xeno-fascist" high-party glory.

Anyhow, let's get back to the equally painful topic of corruption. Happy Songkran to you all, this is definitely my last, and thank God there was some gin in the house.