Toddler Who Mooned Li Keqiang Could Face Death Penalty

BEIJING — The toddler from Inner Mongolia who climbed out of a wardrobe and mooned incoming premier Li Keqiang could face the death penalty if he is convicted of treason and “incitement to subvert state power.”

After the pornographic incident was broadcast to millions of viewers on national television, the Chinese government issued a statement saying the boy had “sorely hurt the feelings of the Chinese people,” and that, since he is Chinese, should be charged with treason.

“This was a premeditated act clearly intended to undermine Li Keqiang’s ascendance to the premiership and challenge the legitimacy of the state,” the statement read. “At present, it is unclear who put the child up to it, or how he was radicalized at such an early age.”

Sources in the Ministry of State Security believe that “hostile outside forces” played a part in the young boy’s actions and has detained the father and several Tibetans for further questioning.

Thankfully, Li Keqiang’s next photo op went without a hitch as he visited a local elementary school class and not a single ugly child escaped from the utility closet in which they were locked.