The Joke Assortment with Chewy Centres

The Humourous Word List

Some people collect trivia about baseball games, movies, presidents,
world records, etc. I am a great collector of interesting and amusing
words. Below are a list of a few real words that I find worth a laugh
because I am amazed someone bothered to invent them, or they are all too
apt.

Ergophobia:

Fear of work (better start with an easy one).

Triskaidekaphobia:

Fear of the number thirteen.

Arachibutylphobia:

Fear of the peanut butter sticking to the roof of
your mouth (careful, put that pbj down, you don't really want to hurt
anyone).

Kakastocracy:

Rule by the most incompetent (sound familiar?).

Katzenjammer:

Hangover (try telling your roommate you have a katzenjammer).

Flocculate:

Bearing small tufts of hair (such as my dad's head).

Pixilated:

Off with the pixies (ought to come back into usage in this
New Age).

And here's a greeting to lay on your friends that my grandfather used on
me when I was a youngun: How does your high corpsiosity sagaciate this
fine salubrious morning?

Q: What do you get when you cross a squirrel with a kangaroo?
A: An animal that keeps its nuts in its pockets.

Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Bloody big potholes in the road.

Q: Why did the punker cross the road?
A: Because he had a chicken stapled to his face.

The Vampire

Two nuns were driving on the highway when a vampire landed on the bonnet
(hood) of their car. The one nun says to the other, "Stick your head
out the window and show him your cross." So the other nun pokes her
head out and yells, "You damned vampire, get the hell off our car."

The Dinosaur Extinction Top Ten

For next month we are looking for people's humourous ideas as to why the
dinosaurs became extinct. Example: Because they crossed the road.
E-mail your submissions to muse@glasswings.com.au