FOLLOW OUR JOURNEY...

Here we are a few hours post embryo transfer, belly full of subway and relaxing for majority of the day. We arrived to the clinic around 8:30 this morning and was told to take 600 mg of ibuprofen to prevent any possible cramping during the transfer. We waited patiently and our nurse Kelly took us back to the transfer room. She opened the door and we were greeted with soft music, a monarch butterfly mobile hanging from the ceiling and the words written on the wall, "Believe in miracles everyday." We went over a few paper work details and soon enough I was in my hospital gown and we were waiting of the embryologist to come in. We received good and not so good news from the embryologist. Out of our five eggs, four fertilized and only two of the four were viable. The other two embryos stopped developing after day two. We were able to transfer the two viable embryos that were doing really well. Since the other embryos didn't make it we did not have any embryos to be able to freeze. So to put it basically if this transfer doesn't work we will have to make a hard decision on what to do next since we would have to start all over. Im not going to lie I was pretty upset to hear we didn't have any embryos to freeze, but I have no control over that so Im relying on that its all apart of God's plan. There is so much riding on these two tiny babies that it does bring some fear and worry into the situation. Ryan and I had talked before though on how if we got pregnant especially with twins we wouldn't want a lot of frozen embryos incase we wanted to be done having kids. We believe that these embryos are human and didn't want to destroy them, donate them to science or donate them to another couple while we were still alive. We also didn't want to have to pay for frozen embryos the rest of our life. So we are really hoping that because we have none to freeze that God just basically made that decision for us. We are thankful that we have two strong embryos, we could have only one or none.

I asked Dr. Corfman on why Mayo was able to get more eggs from me then he was and he said its all due to how many eggs my body decides to release. We could do this a few months later and get twice the number of eggs, it just all depends on my body. Once the embryologist left Dr. Corfman came in and they got me situated on the table. He uses a speculum to open me up to see my cervix. He washes the area and gets to the exact area he had measured on the day of the egg retrieval. This area is the prime placement in my uterus for those embryos to be happy and hopefully implant. Once he is ready the embryologist comes in with the catheter that contains our two embryos and the same fluid they are growing in. The release the fluid and embryos and then remove the catheter. They embryologist then goes back to the lab an checks the catheter to make sure it is clear and gives the ok. After that Dr. Corfman removes the speculum and I lay on the table for five minutes before i'm given the ok to get up. Dr. Corfman was pleased at how well they transfer went and even joked about how he didn't even drop the embryos this time. Hahaha! The transfer took about five minutes and the hardest part was having to relax with a speculum in you. They are the most comfortable thing.

During that five minutes I laid there and watched that butterfly mobile float above me. I couldn't help but feel a sense of peace come over me and feeling very relaxed. The beautiful monarchs fluttering around made me think of Gods love for me and finding peace in his goodness. If you look up the meaning of a butterfly it states that, butterflies are deep and powerful representations of life. Many cultures associate the butterfly with our souls. The Christian religion sees the butterfly as a symbol of resurrection. Around the world, people view the butterfly as representing endurance, change, hope and life. I told Ryan when we get pregnant I want to have a butterfly mobile in our nursery like the one in our transfer room. I don't think I will ever look at a butterfly the same way. I got dressed and we headed the 80 miles back to our home in Goodhue. I shed some tears on the car ride home from text messages I received from friends and family members. I also shed some tears out of basically just being scared. This whole process is such a rollercoaster and it all comes down to this day, so many emotions and it felt good to just cry and let out that fear. Ryan has been so awesome through all of this and has been my rock, remaining strong and positive. He even had me laughing laying on the table after the transfer when he played the you tube clip of Phoebe from Friends singing to her fetus after she had her brother's embryos transferred.

I will be on a Motrin regime, 600 mg every 8 hours for the next three days to prevent any cramping. I also start a daily low dose aspirin regime that will continue through my first trimester if we get pregnant. I also start vaginal progesterone suppositories three times a day. I was fortune to not have to do both the suppositories and the daily progesterone injection that is done on the behind. I did beg my doctor to let me do the injection versus the suppositories, but he says the suppositories are more effective. The truth about the suppositories is that they are gross and they are a pain. If I get pregnant I will be using them through my first trimester. Minor pains to have to deal with when the outcome will be a baby but none the less thats the truth that goes on with trying to get pregnant. It can take a few days for the embryos to implant, doctor said I could have some potential spotting from this and that would be a good thing, but if I don't have spotting its not a bad thing either. Everyone is different so don't get upset if I don't have it. Now begins the two week waiting game. This is the hardest part of the whole process, waiting. Doing everything possible to try to distract yourself. Time goes so fast so you hate to wish it away but these two weeks I hope they fly by. Doctor said to take it easy the next few days, walking but nothing strenuous and to wait until at least next week to do any weight training. Nothing crazy but I'm happy to be able to be active versus nothing at all.

We go up for our pregnancy test the day after Easter. We find it fitting that we will be celebrating the resurrection of Jesus the day before with our family. Easter is a picture of new life and birth so as my cousin Trudy texted me we will pray that the Lord will bring a literal new life or lives into our family. We have received an abundance of prayers, love and support from family, friends and complete strangers. We can feel everyone behind us, routing for us, and literally it makes my heart overflow. So everyone keep all those prayers up!! God is good!