Friday, January 21, 2005

Church Girl Day

Church Girl Day!

You're a church girl, which is to say, you don't screw and everyone resents you for it because you're fine. The other kids paint graffiti all over your locker that says "She thinks her insides are so great that she won't let anyone see or thrust into them," but not in so many words. This bugs you. You want to be liked and you wish there was a way for people to get to know you so that they could see what a great person you are.

There is a way. Have intercourse with a boy tonight and make sure everyone finds out about it. Who you have intercourse with doesn't matter much. You don't have to worry about having sex with the wrong guy since everyone will be too blown away that you did the bangbang at all (in the future, "right guy" and "wrong guy" will become very important when considering public perception). Tonight it just matters that everyone finds out all about it by the end of the weekend. No one will hate you anymore on Monday. In fact, they'll like you so much that they'll all try to have sex with you, which after all is the most anyone can ever like anyone.