In the war against spam, the winner is children's literature

12 AM
May 10, 2006

Someone is emailing me J.R.R. Tolkien’sThe Hobbit. This last week, thousands of advertisements for prescription drugs have arrived in my inbox, and, at the bottom of each, is a little bit of the The Hobbit. It makes me smile in a most un-spamly manner. Here’s a sample quotation:

fire, till he talks!
I wont have it, said William. I caught him anyway. Youre a fat
fool, William, said Bert, as Ive said afore this evening.
And youre a lout!
And I wont take that from you. Bill Huggins, says Bert, and puts
his fist in Williams eye.
Then there was a gorgeous row. Bilbo had just enough wits left, when
Bert dropped him on the ground, to scramble out of the way of their
feet, before they were fighting like dogs, and calling one another all
sorts of perfectly true and applicable names in very loud voices. Soon
they were locked in one anothers arms, and rolling nearly into the fire
kicking and thumping, while Tom whacked at then both with a branch to
bring them to their senses-and that of course only made them madder than