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People get insured for lots of stuff that may never come to pass -- earthquakes, dismemberment, "death" -- so why not protect yourself against an eventuality you know's gonna happen? Since it's only a matter of time, TicketAssurance.com.

In return for minimal monthly payments, Atlanta-based TA will pay the fines for up to three moving and three non-moving traffic violations annually, hundreds of dollars in savings for anyone with a lead foot and a complete disrespect for fire hydrants. Coverage includes speeding, parking and failure to stop, the reduction or elimination of outstanding warrants, unpaid fines and collection costs, and up to two booting or impounding incidents, though there's no recompense if the tow-truck dude also happens to like Diana DeGarmo/your ashtray change. If you think you're being persecuted, TA also works with court services specialists, who'll attempt to get your case dismissed by composing letters, using inside connections, and giving intensely satisfying neck massages.