Soldiers Volunteer To Return To Afghanistan

The Ministry of Defence has confirmed reports that many soldiers have slapped in requests to return to Afghanistan early rather than be deployed in London during the Olympics.

Commanding Officers claim that many of their men, when faced with the prospect of serving in a hostile, unfamiliar environment prefer Afghanistan, with many citing language and cultural differences as reasons for not wishing to be selected to patrol London streets.

The army has confirmed that Landover’s and other military equipment will be beefed up for the tough environment by having second floors welded onto them and windscreens fitted with extra strong meshing aswell as car alarm systems and anti-theft devices fitted.

Army Doctors have also issued warnings to soldiers being deployed in London and have warned them of the high risk of STDs prevalent in the zones they will be asked to patrol.

However there will be some perks for soldiers ordered to London, with increased danger money and an allowance provided to compensate for the harsher living conditions.