"Dave, can you come out and here and talk to us?"
"No."
"Please, Dave. We just want to talk."
"I don't want to talk to you."
"Dude, the BBC has got you on video."
"The BB-what?"
"BBC. You know. English TV. Monty Python."
"I don't get it."
"You're on YouTube, man."
"I don't watch the YouTube."
"Just open the door, Dave."posted by Cool Papa Bell at 11:04 AM on February 10, 2011 [1 favorite]

I kind of wish I had watched it before making a stupid remark now.posted by molecicco at 11:04 AM on February 10, 2011

Perhaps the impoliteness involved in pointing a realistic-looking air pistol is merely a reflection of the deeper impoliteness of the system itself.posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 11:13 AM on February 10, 2011 [3 favorites]

"I really am sorry to have to do this," he says. "I've got rent to pay. I've got bills. And the kids need to eat.... Thank you very much, I appreciate it," he says after allegedly robbing [the store's owner] of about $300. "I really am sorry, and if I ever get back on my feet again, sir, I'll bring it back."

I remember a story from a few years ago - I probably saw it here - about a couple of guys who robbed a drive-through coffee stand. There wasn't enough money in the tills for them, so they worked the stand for a while, making coffee for customers.posted by rtha at 11:17 AM on February 10, 2011 [3 favorites]

I'm sorry: with the mention of "politeness", "CCTV" and "petrol" I had assumed this was in Britain. I apologize.posted by boo_radley at 11:26 AM on February 10, 2011

Why should we take anything he says at face value (and does he even have starving kids at home)? Plenty of people use empathy as a way to get what they want. And plenty of people frame their lives and actions in a certain way to convince themselves of their goodness.posted by naju at 11:29 AM on February 10, 2011 [3 favorites]

Where's Super Granny with her handbag when you really need her?posted by yeti at 11:31 AM on February 10, 2011 [2 favorites]

Plenty of people use empathy as a way to get what they want.

Yeah, I'm thinking a person robbed by a polite, empathetic robber might be less likely to call the cops. Especially when that person is themselves a low-paid clerk.posted by DU at 11:34 AM on February 10, 2011

According to Michael Caine, the most dangerous time to be around a cockney mobster is when they've gotten polite and chummy. They're getting you to lower your guard so they can feed you your own Davinas.posted by Astro Zombie at 11:44 AM on February 10, 2011 [1 favorite]

His politeness seems like it's for his own short circuited conscience more than anything. Also, his gun handling (air pistol or not) seems sloppy and lazy so someone with a gun behind the counter and good reflexes could easily get the drop on him and make things bloody instead of polite.posted by Burhanistan at 11:46 AM on February 10, 2011

A fine point that is definitely lost on felony armed robbery laws, no doubt. But yeah, since it's an air gun he might've been actively trying to not point it at the victim for fear that he might notice the tiny muzzle opening and call his bluff.posted by Burhanistan at 12:00 PM on February 10, 2011

I don't care if it's an air gun or not, I've worked enough retail to know that if someone pulls one out while you're at the till, you do what they tell you.

Kinda funny, though, that the cashier offered to just give him $40 instead.posted by PhoBWanKenobi at 12:08 PM on February 10, 2011

I'm sorry: with the mention of "politeness", "CCTV" and "petrol" I had assumed this was in Britain. I apologize.

Had a dear friend who worked at a gas station in college who was robbed at gunpoint. They weren't particularly rude but she had nightmares about it for years. YEARS. She was just trying to pay her bills, too, and help her parents out a little bit (her mother had just been diagnosed with MS).posted by the young rope-rider at 12:11 PM on February 10, 2011 [1 favorite]

Where's Super Granny with her handbag when you really need her?

She only stops burglaries, not robberies. I'm always surprised at how these guys are willing to risk getting shot or spending years in prison for less than $100 and a cup of coffee. (I hope it was some serious gourmet shit and not freeze-dried Taster's Choice.)posted by Hylas at 12:12 PM on February 10, 2011

I'm pretty sure the clerk would rather call the cops on a polite robber than be fired for theft him/herself.posted by freshwater at 12:13 PM on February 10, 2011

funny Sticherbeast, I just watched that for the first time last nightposted by supermedusa at 12:13 PM on February 10, 2011

Gregory Paul Hess, 65, whose identity was confirmed to AOL News by Police Sgt. John Urquhart of the King County Sheriff's office

At that age he probably doesn't have young children at home. I thought he looked on the old side for a father of children young enough to be financially dependent on him, but it was hard to tell in the video.posted by orange swan at 1:09 PM on February 10, 2011

Eh, I don't see where the story is here. I don't care if he's polite or swears when he's robbing me. Either way he's an asshole douchebag.

News last night was saying he didn't even have kids. A prior felon, a liar, and a robber.

Add to this that even if he were indeed a desperate father with kids to feed I'd not have much sympathy for him after he points a guy at a man actually earning a living.

I hope he goes away for a long time.posted by cjorgensen at 1:13 PM on February 10, 2011

If the above reads as too harsh add a "sir" and a "please" in there somewhere. I don't want people to think I am a bigger asshole than that asshole.posted by cjorgensen at 1:15 PM on February 10, 2011

Now see, if this guy were Omar, he wouldn't have to say a thing.posted by bwg at 4:43 PM on February 10, 2011

It's really bad when a person robbing you at gunpoint is more civil than the people you meet on any given day when you're out shopping or doing whatever.posted by Mael Oui at 8:11 PM on February 10, 2011

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