considering I have a halfway functioning brain and a smidgen of common sense.

My hours in the airport were rampant with eavesdropping material. A few things you should never discuss in a public place:

-how the doctor removed your cyst

-the family problems you will encounter over Thanksgiving

(especially when talking to a stranger)

-anything said when sitting by yourself in the airport bar

Also,

I find it aesthetically offensive when people dress for flying

as if they are about to be put into a coma. IT'S NOT THAT BAD.Sure, the seats aren't super comfortablebut you're not sitting on a hardwood bench for days.And if you were, those flannel monstrosities aren't going to help much. Neither are your skintight yoga pants.Man up and wear some real clothing.

Ignore the "Peace Corps Volunteer" part. Just get out.

Think about flying 50 years ago.

People dressed.

As technology has increased, humanity's ability to wear non-elastic clothing

while in the air seems to have decreased. Being poorly dressed isn't a thing, so stop trying to make it a thing.This post is going to have to end early. I just worked all weekend at Anthro. I was excited to work after Thanksgivingbecause I could finally embrace all the holiday loveliness.

But after a few days of the same remixed Christmas music on repeat, I feel like the holidays just curb-stomped me. I came home to a VERY large glass of wine tonight.

I have another full week at the law firm& then another weekend at Anthro. My next day off is not anywhere on the horizon. And now my eye is twitching.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

First off, can I just say how annoying it iswhen someone at work mentions my age?

It's never in admiration. No one mentions how young I amand is impressed with my go-getter attitude & the fact that I have a real job.Any time my age is mentioned,it's in a manner of doubt. When I was teaching, the other educators were constantly talkingabout how young I was.One even alluded to the fact that I would have her daughterin my class next year and that she was a little leery. Excusez-moi?And, now, at the law firm, clients & co-workers alikemention my youth as a sign of ineptitude. What do they expect?There is no law saying young peoplemust serve five years as retail/fast food workers/babysittersbefore obtaining real employment. And shouldn't it be an embarrassment that someone fifteen years your seniorhas the same job?Moral of the story:I don't mention how old you are. Please don't mention how young I am. Back to ze blog…(If you're a new reader, this might not be the post to start with.Try one in which I sound intelligent and not fan-girly.)Sorry, ladies & gents(HA! Like anyone of the male persuasion reads my blog):this one's a fluff piece dedicated to a lovely lady in my life.

I watched this commercial

on my way to a video of super-cute GWB being super-cute on Jay Leno.

And it got me thinking.

Britney Spears really does do what she want.

Like, sometimes, I say it...

…but I know that I really will do whatever a higher authority tells me.

I'm simply not as brazen as our Supreme Leader Spears.

I've often threatened to shave my head

(mostly when it's a billion degrees outside because I have quite the mane

and it gets sweaty-difficult.)

But never have I actually taken the clippers to my locks.

My girl Brit did.

And she clearly enjoyed it.

Literally, not a day passes in which I don't feel like hitting someone with an umbrella.

As I do not have fame & fortune to fall back on,

I have to practice restraint.

Baby girl doesn't.

And I envy her all the more for it.

I also tend to practice some of that restraint with my clothing choices.

I would love to wear glitter and fur and animal print and tulle ALL THE TIME.

But, alas, I am not a Russian czarina, a lost Russian princess,

or a member of the Russian mob.

Maybe not so much the denim-on-denim, though. But I'll take a JT on my arm, any day. She made an absolutely awful movie

but we've all seen it at least once. If you say you haven't, you're a liar. This comes on TBS for a full weekend at least once a year. Sit down, shut up, and experience some girlfriend roadtripping. And then watch her guest star on How I Met Your Mother. SHE DOES, LITERALLY, WHATEVER SHE WANTS.I'm not obsessed. I mean, I hosted multiple Britney-only Power Hoursover my college career. But that's not crazy.

I just think the fact that she's been freaking AWESOMEfor almost 15 years is quite the feat. And she makes faces like this while listening to others sing:

I like my job at Anthro. It wears me out, and makes my feet hurt, and sometimes I get super stressed, but the people are nice, and it smells good, and the discount is awesome, and I'm surrounded by beautiful things. So it's worth it, in the end. Here are some things I've learned at Anthro, so far:» The world is upside down

More people at Anthro have college degrees or are pursuing degreesthan at the law firm. I'll wait while you read that again. WHAT.» Style is (relatively) subjective and ever-changingI'm more adventurous, style-wise, than I was pre-Anthro.(Sadly, I also put more care into dressing for Anthro than I do for the law firm.Everyone at the law firm has glittery fake nails.Sue me for not caring what they think.)

This is an acceptable work hairstyle at Anthro:

It makes me feel like a sumo wrestler.

» Shoppers are destructive

The sale section.

Sigh.

I spent an hour organizing the sale room on Saturday,

all the while knowing that my work would be for naught.

Here's some friendly retail advice: HANG YOUR CRAP UP. If you are the reason something falls to the floor, you get to be the one to pick it back up. It is my job to sell beautiful things and help you find those beautiful thingsand get you a fitting room for those beautiful things.At the end of the day, I help make the beautiful store look beautiful again.

It is not my job to pick up after you like some maid.Also, don't leave your coffee cup tucked behind things. It's rude. » Never turn your back on a childOne: Children go straight to the egg timersand set all of them to 10 minute intervals. Two: Children take the fragile holiday bellsand run through the store ringing them. Three: Children take the markers in the fitting roomand write fake names on all of the doorsso I have no idea which rooms are actually in use. To be continued, I'm sure...