For your information, I'm half-Chinese now. That's right, Lee. For the last three years, I've studied the ancient teaching of Buddha, earning two black belts in Wushu martial arts, spending every afternoon at the Garden Massage Parlor in Pico and Bundy. I'm half-Chinese, baby.

In case you missed it, man, people are trying to kill me! I'm covered in shit and some French cops whupped my ass with some yellow pages, man. So don't tell me it ain't none of my business!

Fine. I'm not your brother.

Lee, I'm in trouble. I need some assistance!

Sister, you tell this piece of S-word that I will personally F-word him up.

I am trying kill somebody, man! Damn!

I wouldn't say nothing. He has me. His brother from another mother.

You Asian! Stop humiliating yourself!

I need a big suite, two beds, two showers, a massage therapist, some new clothes and a case of Old Spice.

Lee. I got a big problem, man. This guy's on steroids. He got a head like Barry Bonds.

Do you know who I am? Detective James Carter, LAPD. My family owns half of Crenshaw Boulevard.

We almost killed your ass! Why you didn't move? I would like for you to meet our dates for tonight, Marsha and Zoe. Fat one's yours.

Sorry, Lee. You can't be black. There's a height requirement.

I'm coming, Soo-Yung! [looks down from the Eiffel Tower] Oh, my god! What the hell am I doing up here?

I don't know what the hell you feeding him, but he is too damn big!

I'm about slice you up like a giant California Roll! (Grabs a spear nearby).

Holy mother of Jesus! She's a man! I went to second base with a damn Frenchman! It's the Crying Games! I'm Broke Back Carter!! Oh God...

Carter: For your information, I'm half-Chinese now. That's right, Lee. For the last three years, I've studied the ancient teaching of Buddha, earning two black belts in Wushu martial arts, spending every afternoon at the Garden Massage Parlor in Pico and Bundy. I'm half-Chinese, baby.

Carter: You know what I think? I think you feel sorry for this guy. Maybe Kenji didn't get away in L.A. Maybe you let him go.

Lee: The Yakuza killed his family in Tokyo. He was sent to China when he was seven. He was put in Chenzou, the orphanage where I grew up. We kept each other alive.

Carter: You protected each other and you still protecting him.

Lee: I called him Xiong Di. He was like my brother. And then, I left him.

Carter: You were adopted. What choice did you have?

Lee: He ended up on the streets. You could never understand.

Carter: I understand. I got a brother, too. My little brother, Perry. We used to be best friends. Now we don't even speak. He thinks I tipped off the cops about the chicken fights in his garage. Can you believe that? My own brother think I'm a snitch. Just because my chicken lost in the semifinals. I didn't even really care.

Lee: Carter.

Carter: He had to fight a chicken that didn't make his weight. And he still went the distance. He had a lot of heart. And he was delicious.

Carter: And I'm about to whoop your old ass, man, 'cause I'm sick of playin' games! (points to everyone in the room) You, me, everybody's ass around here! (points to tall student) Him--I'm-a kick his ass, I'm sick of this!

Detective James Carter: (to Lee, as they ride the elevator to their rooms) It's all your fault. How come you didn't tell me about Kenji?

Chief Inspector Lee: (clearly upset) That was none of your business.

Detective James Carter: In cased you missed it, man; people are trying to kill me! I'me covered in shit and some French cop whooped my ass with some yellow pages, man. So don't tell me it ain't none of my business.

Chief Inspector Lee: You lucky we're not in Hong Kong. Phone book twice as big.

Detective James Carter: Why didn't you tell me you had a brother, man?

Carter: You are one mess up lady, I mean man, I mean whoever the hell you are?