Could striving for
life balance be reaching for an ideal, which is only an illusion?

What I mean by life balance is having the various aspects of our lives flowing smoothly and easily. When new experiences come
into our lives that create uneasiness and chaos, invited or uninvited, do we
still need to be striving for balance?During
this time of reaching, we are no longer being present to what is happening in
the now…we are trying to BE something else.It almost seems as though this striving
is a form of resistance to what is…which may intensify the feelings of
uneasiness and chaos in our lives rather than bring us the peace we so desire.

Some years back, I was a single mom, working part time.My youngest son became extremely ill.My life began to feel way out of
balance.I could hardly keep up with
what needed to be done.Working, raising
my boys, getting my son to all of his medical appointments, keeping up with his
treatments (which had to be done every 4 hours around the clock), along with a
million other details.I had an
internal sense that I was not “doing it right.”So, I went to the book store and picked up a book that explored life
balance.As I read through the book the
words felt like a slap in the face!The discussion
read like a like to-do list.I already
had too much on my plate and none of it could come off.The author acted like if I could just follow
her step-by-step program, all would be well! What
I really needed was a hug!!!

Life balance started to look like something other people
could accomplish…but not me.

But, in truth, my life had moved into a new rhythm…I had to listen
and tune into the new heart beat…the new pulse.I needed to become fully present to what was happening rather than striving to have things different. Some
moments felt balanced, while other moments felt like I was falling off a
cliff.I did a lot of breathing.I eased up on my judgment of how my life was
“supposed to be.” I stopped comparing myself to others… and I used that book as
kindling in our wood burning stove!!

Some years later my son’s health returned and life moved
into new possibilities…there was a new rhythm.With my son’s health, came a strong steady heart beat…a more consistent
rhythm… one we could groove with, on a day to day basis.

Maybe our lives are filled with many starts and stops that
show us how to be present to the ebb and the flow… to the ever changing
seasons.Maybe when we are 90 years old
and we are looking back on our lives from the broader perspective we will see a
balance in all of the uneasiness and chaos. A balance in the ebb and flow.We will see years that we raised children,
years that we took care of ill loved ones, years that we played, years that we
focused on careers, years that we were in relationships and years that we were
not.We will be able to see that our
life balance was there the whole time… we just didn’t have the broader view.

I give you permission to be fully present with where you
life is now.There is no balance that
you need to strive for, nothing that you are doing “wrong”… so, take a deep
breath and let’s dance to the beat… to the flow… to the ever changing rhythms of
life!