Monthly Archives: April 2006

During Chelsea’s nap today she dreamt that I was made of butter and couldn’t go outside. I apparently got so fed up with staying in, however that she had to fight to keep me from going out. Somehow I managed to get out and I melted, just as she said. As a result I lost my apartment. She threw a concert to raise money for me to get a new place. The band was the Smashing PumpKIDS, a cover band of children that looked just like their adult counterparts. Needless to say, they were a hit and I got new digs. The end,

Naps are better than the movies.via hiptop

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Like this:

My grocery store Walmart has all new labels in their deli for the side dishes and they all look like what would happen if the factory accidentally started using the labels on file from the 60’s. They’re not cool looking in a retro way or ugly in an old way, they just look like what they are: from the 60’s.via hiptop

Like this:

As you can see I have become a cyborg, the latest in Crohn’s-fighting technology. The little computer box outside of my shirt records pictures taken every 2 seconds from a wireless digital camera that I swallowed early this morning. Little diodes stuck to my abdomen in several places receive the signals and relay them back to the computer. Next up – I’m going to shrink myself and put me inside of ship in my own stomach and blast the Crohn’s – that the camera detects – away!