10 December 2009

Crazy Shit I Have Witnessed - An Incredibly Small Kitten

A year ago, my little sister informed me that, in addition to the hulking black cat she took from home, she had adopted a small stray kitten. Assholes on the internet love cats. 4chan stalkers and lolcats have proved this to be law. Being an asshole on the internet, I love cats. I especially love kittens.

We arrived at her apartment. "He's in my room."

I burst down her bedroom door, driven for a thirst for kitten cuteness. But I see no kitten.

"He might be sleeping under my pillow."

Out crawled the tiniest kitten in the world, named Mr. Monk.

Those are normal sized pillows. He is an abnormal sized kitten.

Oh my lord. I couldn't believe. A kitten so small he slept in the gap between a pillow and the bed. He was so tiny that he couldn't jump off the bed. He would flip off the edge of the bed into a pile of pillows my sister provided to lessen the chances of injury and brain damage.

FYI: My school ID is the same size of a driver's license.

Mr. Monk is now about a year old and has grown into a large, lanky cat. He is also a complete and utter asshole who bites everyone and climbs window screens in his spare time.