The thing is, like everyone else, if i focus on a pleasure emotion, i will feel a pleasure. But i cant -really- feel a pleasure by doing a thing itself.

Researchers theorize that anhedonia may result from the breakdown in the brain's reward system, involving the neurotransmitter dopamine. Studies by Paul Keedwell, MD, then of King's College, found that the brains of participants who were clinically depressed had to work harder to process rewarding experiences.

So i can feel happy if i think & focus to it, but otherwise i will stay in a neutral emotion despite my actions. It's not natural for me to "enjoy" something, but it's still doable... but i can "enjoy" without anything even if it's not natural so... i dont need moar o.o

By the way, i still feel others emotions too, as the fear, the "adrenaline" feeling, the stress, Ect. naturally but it doesnt "cover" my neutral state, so it's like i'm at 133434 kilometers of myself. I see myself from an other point of view. I'm not a block of ice with a static face, my emotions still touch me, just that my mind will " block" & "control" them.

This "neutral" position in my mind is required for the control of myself...because i'm physically hyper sensitive, it goes with my dyspraxia sickness. [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

People with dyspraxia may have sensory processing disorder, including abnormal oversensitivity or undersensitivity to physical stimuli, such as touch, light, and sound.[18] This may manifest itself as an inability to tolerate certain textures such as sandpaper or certain fabrics and including oral toleration of excessively textured food (commonly known as picky eating), or even being touched by another individual (in the case of touch oversensitivity) or may require the consistent use of sunglasses outdoors since sunlight may be intense enough to cause discomfort to a dyspraxic (in the case of light oversensitivity). An aversion to loud music and naturally loud environments (such as clubs and bars) is typical behavior of a dyspraxic individual who suffers from auditory oversensitivity, while only being comfortable in unusually warm or cold environments is typical of a dyspraxic with temperature oversensitivity. Undersensitivity to stimuli may also cause problems. Dyspraxics who are undersensitive to pain may injure themselves without realising.[18] Some dyspraxics may be oversensitive to some stimuli and undersensitive to others.[18] These are commonly associated with autism spectrum conditions.

Otherwise... i could feel bad, or "overloaded"

People with dyspraxia sometimes have difficulty moderating the amount of sensory information that their body is constantly sending them, so as a result these people are prone to panic attacks

Despite this "neutral" state, i have a lot of "hot flashes"[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]And no, i'm not menauposed or castrated xD

Also, my "rewarding" system is screwed up because of the others dispraxya's problems. When something is hard to do for you but you judge that this thing is common and "easy"... you cant be proud of you.

n addition to the physical impairments, dyspraxia is associated with problems with memory, especially short-term memory.[16][19][20][21][22] This typically results in difficulty remembering instructions, difficulty organizing one's time and remembering deadlines, increased propensity to lose things or problems carrying out tasks which require remembering several steps in sequence (such as cooking)

The thing is, like everyone else, if i focus on a pleasure emotion, i will feel a pleasure. But i cant -really- feel a pleasure by doing a thing itself.

Researchers theorize that anhedonia may result from the breakdown in the brain's reward system, involving the neurotransmitter dopamine. Studies by Paul Keedwell, MD, then of King's College, found that the brains of participants who were clinically depressed had to work harder to process rewarding experiences.

So i can feel happy if i think & focus to it, but otherwise i will stay in a neutral emotion despite my actions. It's not natural for me to "enjoy" something, but it's still doable... but i can "enjoy" without anything even if it's not natural so... i dont need moar o.o

By the way, i still feel others emotions too, as the fear, the "adrenaline" feeling, the stress, Ect. naturally but it doesnt "cover" my neutral state, so it's like i'm at 133434 kilometers of myself. I see myself from an other point of view. I'm not a block of ice with a static face, my emotions still touch me, just that my mind will " block" & "control" them.

This "neutral" position in my mind is required for the control of myself...because i'm physically hyper sensitive, it goes with my dyspraxia sickness. [You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]

People with dyspraxia may have sensory processing disorder, including abnormal oversensitivity or undersensitivity to physical stimuli, such as touch, light, and sound.[18] This may manifest itself as an inability to tolerate certain textures such as sandpaper or certain fabrics and including oral toleration of excessively textured food (commonly known as picky eating), or even being touched by another individual (in the case of touch oversensitivity) or may require the consistent use of sunglasses outdoors since sunlight may be intense enough to cause discomfort to a dyspraxic (in the case of light oversensitivity). An aversion to loud music and naturally loud environments (such as clubs and bars) is typical behavior of a dyspraxic individual who suffers from auditory oversensitivity, while only being comfortable in unusually warm or cold environments is typical of a dyspraxic with temperature oversensitivity. Undersensitivity to stimuli may also cause problems. Dyspraxics who are undersensitive to pain may injure themselves without realising.[18] Some dyspraxics may be oversensitive to some stimuli and undersensitive to others.[18] These are commonly associated with autism spectrum conditions.

Otherwise... i could feel bad, or "overloaded"

People with dyspraxia sometimes have difficulty moderating the amount of sensory information that their body is constantly sending them, so as a result these people are prone to panic attacks

Despite this "neutral" state, i have a lot of "hot flashes"[You must be registered and logged in to see this link.]And no, i'm not menauposed or castrated xD

Also, my "rewarding" system is screwed up because of the others dispraxya's problems. When something is hard to do for you but you judge that this thing is common and "easy"... you cant be proud of you.

n addition to the physical impairments, dyspraxia is associated with problems with memory, especially short-term memory.[16][19][20][21][22] This typically results in difficulty remembering instructions, difficulty organizing one's time and remembering deadlines, increased propensity to lose things or problems carrying out tasks which require remembering several steps in sequence (such as cooking)

i'm actually diagnosed as dyspraxic by 2 doctors, a neuropsychologist & an orthoptist. I also wear differents glasses which includes special prisms for my vision. And i do a reeducation to help my coordination between my eyes and the movement of my body with a psychomotor doctor.

My parents are doctors too, but they didnt learn this sickness when they was studying, 30 years ago.Thoo we have discovered my problem 2 years ago. Before, we knew that in all my life something was wrong, but we dont knew what. I'm born with dispraxya & imma die with it :p Btw, it's nice to have the name to yours problems when you feel "different" in some ways. When we have diagnosed it, i felt like "OMG finally, i was not mad/crazy/schyzo. I was not imagining things, it was not my mind, it was my fukin brain."

soso. I took my referencies in wikipedia because it was simplier and nothing was wrong(atleast, with my knownledge). Of course i dont have all the symptoms which are in the links. fortunately. It was just for give you an idea of what i'm talking about.

RedSphinx wrote:GreenTeck, you cannot say that, unless it is your personal experience. From my point of view, even though you don't give a shit of course, all this *no life* and *living the game* is one big MYTH. I could point at any user of this forum and I am 100% certain he / she would have personal life, hobbies, tasks to attend, do work / school / university. It is one big MYTH baloon inflated by trolls, who base their words on EXTREMELY rare examples of *no life*. So yeah, what I am trying to say is that you are trying to express yourself, basing it on your personal experience, or you try to boost your ego by downgrading other people with your statements based upon air, ain't that so?

Joel wrote:I have a cousin that's dyspraxic. as well as "aspergers" (dumbest disorder ever)

hes pretty normal just has bad hand/eye co ordination. and he cant understand sarcasm... at all. he has IQ of 160 or something yet he is a complete social retard.

none of the crazy shyt u posted up there lol

Dyspraxia, as a lot of neuropathologies, can vary between a lot of symptoms and the degree of the symptoms will vary aswell.The asperger syndrome is in the "overlap with others conditions" part of the wikipedia article.I'm physically normal, i talk almost naturally but i will speak too fast in some situations, like stress.Otherwise, my coordination is bad, my short memory too, i cant write well with a pencil, i have some psychomotors problems but you will maybe not notice my problems if you talk with me.you could think that i'm a bit strange but normal like everyone else. Etc.

However, they are unlikely to have problems in all of these areas. The pattern of difficulty varies widely from person to person, and it is important to understand that a major weakness for one dyspraxic can be a strength or gift for another.

Now let's talk about the crazy shet symptoms.

it's simple, imagine that, all the day, all the mins, all seconds, you feel your anus. Now extend it to your complete body. ( not the anus hey, just the feeling of your body ) And you feel it too much. it's an oversensitivity.My muscles, my skin, my tongue are oversensitive as all my others senses. At the start it look nice no? its cool to feel "moar"...?The problem is that my brain cant classify theses informations and "disable" the unecessary ones. So i'm always disturbed by the own feeling of myself. Especially when the feeling is Pain. because Yeah, you feel everything, the pain in your back, the ballz that you want to scratch. Your tongue in your own mouth and when you move it, yours teeths. Your belly which is full or not if you have eat. You want to pee or not, The degree of the feeling is always the same for my overall body. i feel my toes to the spots of my hairs

I have a lot of headaches cuz my eyes are oversensitive to the light. I should wear sunglasses even in my house when i'm near a window in the day. If i go in a place with a high luminosity, i will just feel sick and have a migraine, no beach for me, no high mountain. I dont enjoy the day, and i prefer to live the night.

I dislike the warm, i start to feel bad when the temperature exceed 20 degrees.

When you cant stop to feel everything at the same time, you become mad. You cant be concentrate, focus on something, or do a simple action. You cant think, you dont have the possibility for that, you FEEL. You dont have the control. It can lead to a panic attack.

So now, we can add this oversensivity factor with the others dyspraxia problems which touch me more or less.

In addition to the physical impairments, dyspraxia is associated with problems with memory, especially short-term memory.[16][19][20][21][22] This typically results in difficulty remembering instructions, difficulty organizing one's time and remembering deadlines, increased propensity to lose things or problems carrying out tasks which require remembering several steps in sequence (such as cooking). Whilst most of the general population experience these problems to some extent, they have a much more significant impact on the lives of dyspraxic people.[21] However, many dyspraxics have excellent long-term memories, despite poor short-term memory.[21] Many dyspraxics benefit from working in a structured environment,[23] as repeating the same routine minimises difficulty with time-management and allows them to commit procedures to long-term memory.

Poor timing.Poor balance (sometimes even falling over in mid-step). Tripping over one's own feet is also common.Difficulty combining movements into a controlled sequence.Difficulty remembering the next movement in a sequence.This disorder can cause an individual to be clumsy to the point of knocking things over and bumping into people accidentally.

Welcome in Hell.

Moderate to extreme difficulty doing physical tasks is experienced by some dyspraxics, and fatigue is common because so much extra energy is expended while trying to execute physical movements correctly.[25]

So, What i have learnt (by myself, in years of life, because it was a necessity for survive), for be a "normal" human and have an almost normal life, is to protect my mind of my feelings and emotions. I try to be away of my self and stay "neutral". It was a long process, and it's still not finished. Sometimes i fail, cant control my feeling of myself, and feel fukin bad for "nothing", it's what i call being " overloaded", too much informations at same time. Even if i do nothing. It's a panic attack. In my case it generally lead to have hot flashes, migraines, anxiety, nauseas, dizziness.

Unfortunately, this neutral state also cut me of the general pleasures of the life, but i prefer that.it's near ( but NOT exactly) an anhedonia sickness. Atleast it's peacefull. Calm and quiet.

Because i'm away of myself and see the things from an other point of view, for protect myself of my feelings,it can be diagnosed as derealization or depersonalization. the frontier between them are extremely short.i dont feel like an actor, i'm watching the T.V by the eyes of my body which is not really under my control, if i take the control, i will feel bad.

It's hard to explain, and i think it's even harder to understand, unfortunately we cant feel the others peoples experiences.

Last edited by Lancegeis on Fri Apr 13, 2012 12:05 am; edited 2 times in total

the feeling of " to live" is directly linked to your feeling of your "existence". You feel your own existence by the "others". You exist because the "others" will show you that you exist. It's a "mirror".To exist... For it, you need to feel a belonging with something, your familly, yours friends or even your religion (shut up ! :p i know u!), your society or anything else.Maybe "I" cant exist if there is no "others" at all? You can live, but do you will really feel your existence in this world?

You're right, it works like that as well as it don't. You live for yourself, that's how it should be. Does it matter how many people note your presence? No. Each eye is individual, mass is nothing. This is serious question, does it matter how many people know you? I have a certain circle of people who know me, and what if millions would know me? Does it matter for you as human being who seek to fill yourself with meaning? From my point of view, it doesn't matter at all. Yet, you are pretty much intelligent, you discuss like disease was not here, you're better than you described yourself.

he has IQ of 160 or something yet he is a complete social retard.

How is that even possible? I thought IQ got nothing to do with knowledge, because knowledge is not intellect, and IQ seem to be intellect, and he cannot understand sarcasm. Although it is biggest piece of crap what could ever be invented by human. How can you measure intellect? Give me two IQ tests, not the same of course, I guarantee results would be different, so how correct is it? Not to mention 1/3 of test itself is based on luck - choose answer randomly when you have no idea. So my point is that you cannot be measured like that, only after a certain discussion you might evaluate your companion. That's my opinion.

People will do what they are used to doing. If they are assholes in real life they will be assholes in games too.

I can be some dirty ass hole in game, but in reality I have no balls to be like that. It is different to look into someones eyes & speak and to chat on internet, without any responsibility of any action. Plus, for example, I am kind hearted, some might take an advantage of this, so I am not so same in action. Yet thoughts in head might circulate the same way as in game, so I guess you're right, even though I behave differently. These ass holes usually hide over a mask, the troll mask.

It's hard to explain, and i think it's even harder to understand, unfortunately we cant feel the others peoples experiences.

I put all my imagination towards it and I find it really complicated & uncomfortable, so I start to understand why you don't see the light in life, yet I cannot say anything as it was not my experience.

Last edited by RedSphinx on Thu Apr 12, 2012 11:58 pm; edited 1 time in total

You're right, it works like that as well as it don't. You live for yourself, that's how it should be. Does it matter how many people note your presence? No. Each eye is individual, mass is nothing. This is serious question, does it matter how many people know you? I have a certain circle of people who know me, and what if millions would know me? Does it matter for you as human being who seek to fill yourself with meaning? From my point of view, it doesn't matter at all. Yet, you are pretty much intelligent, you discuss like disease was not here, you're better than you described yourself.

Effectevely it's not the number of peeps but the importance that you "put" in the relation, it's also how the "love" (not the sexual one) feeling work, when you are recognized by someone. If the relation is not important, or if you cant allow an importance to the relation, can you feel your existence?so yeah you will live and feel your own life. but still do you will feel your existence...? i dunno.Be recognized, by anything, is required for feel ours existences.

It's why internet relations are interresting , with this tool, we can accord a false importance to a relation and suddently... disconnect it. A lot of ppls do it every day without thinking about it over the global internet, via chats & forums.It's also why ppls can "create an illusion" of their own life and feel better with the net, it fill a "need". There is nothing wrong with that, it's a human process like an other.

IQ test is bullshit, of course. when i was a 7 years old child i had a QI of 135, now i have a QI of 115, does that mean i'm less intelligent? Of course not. That only mean that my knownledge was in advance for my age when i was a child.and that i still have "some knownledge" according to some mesureables capacities which dont reflect the overall intelligence.

and yeah u can be "intelligent" and do not understand sarcasm... Ppls arent the same and do not understand the sames things by the same words and expressions.

There is also a lot of abstract thinking which cant be explained with words, even in the head of the thinker but which can lead to some genious theory, observations or ideas. Theses abstracts thinking are harder to translate for some peoples, but it doesnt mean that they are idiots, they just cant find the words, or a lot of time is required.

In an IQ test, theses peoples will have a lot of troubles and be "downgraded". therefore, IQ test cant be relevant about the global intelligence of someone. But, IQ test is relevant for something, a fukin bad thing: The efficiency of someone in some tasks. Which would basically lead to his efficiency in differents jobs. When you do an IQ test, you are referenced by your capacities to work with differents tools. It can be knownledge with basic questions but also obversations, memory etc. Which are a part of all the differents jobs create & made by the human.IQ = capacities & efficiences in differents works.

I put all my imagination towards it and I find it really complicated & uncomfortable, so I start to understand why you don't see the light in life, yet I cannot say anything as it was not my experience.

Thank you man, with theses littles words, you gimme some importance and i feel recognized. I will feel my existence for a short moment ... Duuuh I'm joking xD

Yet still thank man, i understand what you mean, as i cant know how is the life of a blindman or a paraplegic, i still can imagine which problems can occur, and how painfull it can be. It's not accurate of course. And it should be more dramatic than what i can think.

Last edited by Lancegeis on Fri Apr 13, 2012 1:17 am; edited 2 times in total