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Hellmand Project: Morgan, veterans form band as form of music therapy

Allen Morgan was addicted to bath salts when they were removed from store shelves last year. Since then, he has sought treatment. Here, Allen, wife, Sarah, and daughter Amelia are seen Nov. 1 at Imagination Place in downtown Gadsden.

MARC GOLDEN | GADSDEN TIMES

BY LISA ROGERSTimes Staff Writer

Published: Saturday, November 10, 2012 at 9:15 p.m.

Last Modified: Saturday, November 10, 2012 at 9:29 p.m.

A car's reflection through the window on a sunny day makes Allen Morgan jump.

A camera's flash has a similar effect.

The Iraqi War veteran doesn't like to talk about the gunfire, explosions and death he encountered.

Like many veterans, Morgan, 29, returned from his tour of duty in Iraq with post-traumatic stress disorder.

He also was diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury after he was involved in three improvised explosive device blasts while serving in Iraq in 2004 and 2005.

Morgan fought in 175 combat missions. In an Army Infantry unit, his group was kicking in doors at 3 or 4 in the morning, and by noon was in the streets of Baghdad, handing out candy and water to kids.

By late afternoon, they were back to conducting searches and kicking in doors.

Morgan doesn't talk about what happened during those days in Iraq. It's something he would like to forget. But he can't.

When he returned home, he didn't know anything was wrong.

“My mom pointed it out,” he said. “I wasn't the person I was when I left. I had masked it all.”

Morgan had a problem with drug and alcohol addiction and sought rehab a few times.

But it wasn't until he tried bath salts — still legal at the time — that he almost lost his mind.

He bought the synthetic cocaine legally at a convenience store in Gadsden.

“I used the drugs to help me get by,” he said. “I thought, ‘It can't be bad for you. It's not illegal.'”

But he was wrong.

Morgan and his wife, Sarah, have a daughter, Amelia, who was 5 months old at the time he tried bath salts.

He had been a great father until then, Sarah said.

Once he used the synthetic cocaine, he began hallucinating and acting irrationally.

After Morgan became more and more irrational, Sarah took steps to have him committed in February 2011. He was treated at a local hospital where several others were treated for the same irrational behavior after using bath salts.

The dangers were evident across the state, and Attorney General Luther Strange issued an emergency order to make bath salts illegal.

The day the emergency order was issued, Sarah attended a news conference at the Etowah County Sheriff's Office and publicly thanked everyone who worked hard to get the drug off the streets.

She was quoted in news stories and on television news shows.

But her willingness to share their story about the dangers of the drugs and importance of getting it off the streets had repercussions.

“The backlash was unbelievable,” she said. “I couldn't get a job. I lost friends because I wouldn't leave my husband.”

They eventually moved to Talladega.

Even after Morgan's treatment for addition to bath salts, he still had to deal with PTSD.

He was on a waiting list for months for in-house treatment at the Veterans Administration hospital in Tuscaloosa.

“I knew we had to get him in,” Sarah said. “PTSD and addiction go hand-in-hand.”

Sarah, a former mental health nurse, was able to benefit from a program that pays spouses to be trained to care for their loved ones with PTSD.

She also is active with FamilyOfaVet.com, an organization for families struggling with life after combat, and with the Wounded Warrior Project.

“I didn't realize how bad it was until it had already chewed me up and spit me out,” Morgan said. “It's overwhelming. It's like somebody threw a grain of salt, and it's picking up things as it's going downhill.”

Morgan completed a 90-day in-house treatment for PTSD in September.

The in-house program is a big factor in treatment, he said.

“They were able to see what medication works for me and what doesn't,” he said. “They had to see what best suits my needs.”

The treatment at the VA hospital was laid back, and Morgan had pottery and art classes.

Morgan found something else, too, that is like therapy to him. He found music.

Morgan had played with a band before, but had not played in a while. He had pawned his guitar and just put music out of his mind.

But one day, the sounds from some fellow veterans in treatment caught his attention.

“I heard them playing and waited until they went on a smoke break, and I went in and started playing,” he said.

When they returned from the break, Morgan was still playing, and the three struck up a conversation.

They soon found that even though it was difficult to talk about their experiences, they could sing about them.

“We had some of the same musical interests,” Morgan said.

But they had even more in common.

Joe Gillentine and Jason Hallman also had served in the Middle East, under circumstances similar to Morgan. All three were in treatment for PTSD and connected through music they wrote about their experiences in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Within a month, the three had 24 original songs and a name — Hellmand Project, a play on the name of Helmand Province, a rugged area of Afghanistan where about 75 percent of the world's opium is grown and where many U.S. veterans have served.

“We added an ‘l' to Helmand because it's a hellish place,” Morgan said. “A lot of good soldiers have died over there.”

Officials at the VA hospital got behind the group and helped them get started and record some of their music.

When they were writing songs and coming up with the original songs, the three clicked, Morgan said.

“We would be jamming and boom ... it just happened,” Morgan said. They blended their tastes of rock, blues and modern influences to create their unique sound.

Morgan had a riff in his mind, and he worked on it about six years. He played it during one of their jam sessions.

Hallman started playing guitar.

“Within 10 minutes, we had a 5-minute song,” Morgan said.

They already have a full-length album.

“I know it sounds cliché, but I can sit down with Joe and Jason, and I lose myself,” Morgan said.

He said their songs cover just about everything.

“It is centered around our experiences there and our experiences back home, and with our family and dealing with the person we are when we return,” Morgan said. “No matter what military branch or MOS (military occupational speciality), the desert sticks on you in its own little way.”

The veterans now have been released from in-house treatment. Morgan went back to Talladega and Gillentine and Hallman to their homes in Red Bay and Hueytown.

“That's where it gets complicated,” Morgan said.

Thanks to technology and smartphones, they continue to write music and exchange ideas.

“We send text messages and just shoot ideas around that way,” he said.

Morgan said the success they have seen in such a short time is amazing, and they have been overwhelmed by the support.

Hellmand Project is one of several bands scheduled to play Nov. 16 at Mathews Bar and Grill in Birmingham. It's a Military Appreciation Show, for ages 18 and older, and features other bands with military connections.

The group will be performing live with Black River Wine, Branded X and Chaotic Theory. Tickets are $8 in advance and $10 at the door.

• To learn more about The Hellmand Project and to listen to their music, visit their Facebook page at www.facebook.com/TheHellmandProject or www.reverbnation.com/thehellmandproject• To learn more about PTSD and the struggles of veterans and their families, go to www.FamilyOfaVet.com

<p>A car's reflection through the window on a sunny day makes Allen Morgan jump.</p><p>A camera's flash has a similar effect.</p><p>The Iraqi War veteran doesn't like to talk about the gunfire, explosions and death he encountered. </p><p>Like many veterans, Morgan, 29, returned from his tour of duty in Iraq with post-traumatic stress disorder.</p><p>He also was diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury after he was involved in three improvised explosive device blasts while serving in Iraq in 2004 and 2005.</p><p>Morgan fought in 175 combat missions. In an Army Infantry unit, his group was kicking in doors at 3 or 4 in the morning, and by noon was in the streets of Baghdad, handing out candy and water to kids.</p><p>By late afternoon, they were back to conducting searches and kicking in doors.</p><p>Morgan doesn't talk about what happened during those days in Iraq. It's something he would like to forget. But he can't.</p><p>When he returned home, he didn't know anything was wrong.</p><p>“My mom pointed it out,” he said. “I wasn't the person I was when I left. I had masked it all.”</p><p>Morgan had a problem with drug and alcohol addiction and sought rehab a few times.</p><p>But it wasn't until he tried bath salts — still legal at the time — that he almost lost his mind.</p><p>He bought the synthetic cocaine legally at a convenience store in Gadsden.</p><p>“I used the drugs to help me get by,” he said. “I thought, 'It can't be bad for you. It's not illegal.'”</p><p>But he was wrong.</p><p>Morgan and his wife, Sarah, have a daughter, Amelia, who was 5 months old at the time he tried bath salts.</p><p>He had been a great father until then, Sarah said.</p><p>Once he used the synthetic cocaine, he began hallucinating and acting irrationally.</p><p>After Morgan became more and more irrational, Sarah took steps to have him committed in February 2011. He was treated at a local hospital where several others were treated for the same irrational behavior after using bath salts.</p><p>The dangers were evident across the state, and Attorney General Luther Strange issued an emergency order to make bath salts illegal.</p><p>The day the emergency order was issued, Sarah attended a news conference at the Etowah County Sheriff's Office and publicly thanked everyone who worked hard to get the drug off the streets.</p><p>She was quoted in news stories and on television news shows.</p><p>But her willingness to share their story about the dangers of the drugs and importance of getting it off the streets had repercussions.</p><p>“The backlash was unbelievable,” she said. “I couldn't get a job. I lost friends because I wouldn't leave my husband.”</p><p>They eventually moved to Talladega.</p><p>Even after Morgan's treatment for addition to bath salts, he still had to deal with PTSD.</p><p>He was on a waiting list for months for in-house treatment at the Veterans Administration hospital in Tuscaloosa.</p><p>“I knew we had to get him in,” Sarah said. “PTSD and addiction go hand-in-hand.”</p><p>Sarah, a former mental health nurse, was able to benefit from a program that pays spouses to be trained to care for their loved ones with PTSD.</p><p>She also is active with FamilyOfaVet.com, an organization for families struggling with life after combat, and with the Wounded Warrior Project.</p><p>“I didn't realize how bad it was until it had already chewed me up and spit me out,” Morgan said. “It's overwhelming. It's like somebody threw a grain of salt, and it's picking up things as it's going downhill.”</p><p>Morgan completed a 90-day in-house treatment for PTSD in September.</p><p>The in-house program is a big factor in treatment, he said.</p><p>“They were able to see what medication works for me and what doesn't,” he said. “They had to see what best suits my needs.”</p><p>The treatment at the VA hospital was laid back, and Morgan had pottery and art classes.</p><p>Morgan found something else, too, that is like therapy to him. He found music.</p><p>Morgan had played with a band before, but had not played in a while. He had pawned his guitar and just put music out of his mind.</p><p>But one day, the sounds from some fellow veterans in treatment caught his attention.</p><p>“I heard them playing and waited until they went on a smoke break, and I went in and started playing,” he said.</p><p>When they returned from the break, Morgan was still playing, and the three struck up a conversation.</p><p>They soon found that even though it was difficult to talk about their experiences, they could sing about them.</p><p>“We had some of the same musical interests,” Morgan said.</p><p>But they had even more in common.</p><p>Joe Gillentine and Jason Hallman also had served in the Middle East, under circumstances similar to Morgan. All three were in treatment for PTSD and connected through music they wrote about their experiences in Iraq and Afghanistan.</p><p>Within a month, the three had 24 original songs and a name — Hellmand Project, a play on the name of Helmand Province, a rugged area of Afghanistan where about 75 percent of the world's opium is grown and where many U.S. veterans have served.</p><p>“We added an 'l' to Helmand because it's a hellish place,” Morgan said. “A lot of good soldiers have died over there.”</p><p>Officials at the VA hospital got behind the group and helped them get started and record some of their music.</p><p>When they were writing songs and coming up with the original songs, the three clicked, Morgan said.</p><p>“We would be jamming and boom ... it just happened,” Morgan said. They blended their tastes of rock, blues and modern influences to create their unique sound.</p><p>Morgan had a riff in his mind, and he worked on it about six years. He played it during one of their jam sessions.</p><p>Hallman started playing guitar.</p><p>“Within 10 minutes, we had a 5-minute song,” Morgan said.</p><p>They already have a full-length album. </p><p>“I know it sounds cliché, but I can sit down with Joe and Jason, and I lose myself,” Morgan said. </p><p>He said their songs cover just about everything.</p><p>“It is centered around our experiences there and our experiences back home, and with our family and dealing with the person we are when we return,” Morgan said. “No matter what military branch or MOS (military occupational speciality), the desert sticks on you in its own little way.”</p><p>The veterans now have been released from in-house treatment. Morgan went back to Talladega and Gillentine and Hallman to their homes in Red Bay and Hueytown.</p><p>“That's where it gets complicated,” Morgan said.</p><p>Thanks to technology and smartphones, they continue to write music and exchange ideas.</p><p>“We send text messages and just shoot ideas around that way,” he said. </p><p>Morgan said the success they have seen in such a short time is amazing, and they have been overwhelmed by the support.</p><p>Hellmand Project is one of several bands scheduled to play Nov. 16 at Mathews Bar and Grill in Birmingham. It's a Military Appreciation Show, for ages 18 and older, and features other bands with military connections.</p><p>The group will be performing live with Black River Wine, Branded X and Chaotic Theory. Tickets are $8 in advance and $10 at the door.</p>
<p class="italic font120">• To learn more about The Hellmand Project and to listen to their music, visit their Facebook page at www.facebook.com/TheHellmandProject or www.reverbnation.com/thehellmandproject<br>• To learn more about PTSD and the struggles of veterans and their families, go to www.FamilyOfaVet.com</p>