2017-01-15

Canuckistanian Dictionary

Any liquid, be it hydrophillic or hydrophobic, homogeneous or pasteurized, that has a viscosity between that of Canuckistanian Beaver Semen at one hour after ejaculation ( 9.35 +/- 0.99 centipoise ) and Canuckistanian Maple Syrup (175 +/- 25 centipoises).

Chooch

To move, either orthogonally, laterally or radially, or any combination of the aforementioned.

To let pixies pass through the wires of a contrivance.

See also "Pixies".

Pixies

Small, usually obedient particles that are expected to form lines inside wires to make contrivances chooch. Se also: "Chooch", "Angry Pixies".

Angry Pixies

Pixies that for some reason are no longer obedient, and may for no reason at all step out of line. Se also: "Pixies".

Bumblefuckery

An activity that may result in a contrivance stopping to chooch. See also "Pop fart and give up the ghost".

(The room formerly known as) wife's sowing

A traditional in-home style Canuckistanian man-cave. Dedicated to learning from books and staying in front of the screen with the occational work with brain boxes. Tempered at around 23 Dungrees.

(The) shop

A traditional out-of-home style Canuckistanian man-cave. Dedicated to performing bumblefuckery with the bridgeport. Tempered at around 15 Dungrees.

(The) bridgeport

An age old contrivance for manually and forcefully opening snail-mail, cracking plexiglass, bending and annealing end-mills and making vodka glasses from sheets of copper.

(The) screen

Special purpose contrivance that allows Canuckistanians to learn stuff from the interwebs and youtubes.

Keep your dick in a vise

Have a nice day. See also "Keep your stick on the ice".

Brainbox

A contrivance dedicated to the controlled conversion of pixies into angry pixies, thereby making one or more other contrivances chooch.

Sexpert

Dumb fuck.

Enginerd

Engineer

Stupidvisor

Supervisor

Frankenstein

Unit of measure for temperature.

1 °Dungree = ( °Frankenstein - 32) × 5/9

1 °Frankenstein = °Dungree × 9/5 + 32

Se also: "Dungrees"

Dungrees

Unit of measure for temperature.

1 °Dungree = ( °Frankenstein - 32) × 5/9

1 °Frankenstein = °Dungree × 9/5 + 32

Se also: "Frankenstein"

Vijeo

Sequence of images displayed in rapid succession with accompanying audio.

Wank overload

An event where too much wank happened.

Cromulent

Important

Redonculous

Ridiculous

Jelly 4 ur Jam

Bang for your buck

Bifocals

Glasses

Canuckistan

The land of the polar beers.

(Canuckistanian) Copeks

Primary unit of wealth in Canuckistan. See also "(Canuckistanian) Pesos".

(Canuckistanian) Pesos

Secondary unit of wealth in Canuckistan. See also "(Canuckistanian) Copeks".

Scientician

Learned Canuckistanian.

Scienticious

Actions carried out exclusively by learned Canuckistanian. See also "Scientician".

Yada yada yada

I don't feel like elaborating now.

It's the cicle of life

At this very moment, I am having an epiphany.

Dog bless the nanny state

Idiomatic exclamation of pure satisfaction equivalent to "God bless the government of Canuckistan for looking after its citizens"!

Pop fart and give up the ghost

To stop chooching.

Flogg it like a Rented mule

To start chooching.

Son of a diddely

Mild expression of disappointment.

Safety squint engaged

Eyes squinting momentyarily to avoid damage. See also "Bifocals".

Fantabulous

Mild expression of approval.

Scokum

Of right Canuckistanian quality.

Keep your stick on the ice

Good day. See also "Keep your dick in a vise".

Rippums

Rotations Per Minute.

Meat hook abortion

Contrivance of unknown or non-Canuckistanian origin. See also "Chinesium".

Chees grade

Of considerable softness.

Bob's your auntie

Let's try this.

The sharpest bowling ball in the shed

Round Contrivance typically kept by land owners of Canuckistan in out-door sheds. Used for measuring relative mental capacity.