Question

How can I tactfully tell my mother-in-law I don't like the clothes she buys for my son?

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My mother-in-law buys clothes for my son that I wouldn't dream of dressing him in. She also buys accessories for his room that don't work with the decor. (We have very different taste, and I'm pretty particular about what I like.) How can I handle this tactfully? Do I have to use her gifts?

I have the same problem with my mother-in-law. I don't have the heart to tell her I don't like what she buys, so I wear the outfits on my son only when we're going to visit her. I don't want to hurt her feelings. I have learned that if she asked what my son needs, I am very specific. For example....I tell her what color socks and exactly what brand to buy, or if he needs Pj's I tell her what type he is most comfortable in and where to find them. I know how hard it is to deal with someone who has such different taste than you do. I keep telling myself that someday I may have a daughter-in-law who has different taste than I do and I wouldn't want her to hurt my feelings. Hope this helps! Good luck!

Perhaps dress him in something you bought that you like when you'll see her and very casually comment about what it is you like about it in her presence. Another idea is to invite her along on your next shopping trip, so that as she's making suggestions about clothes decor, you can explain what you like don't like without it being about something she's already purchased. Try to keep it positive and hopefully this will help her learn something about your tastes without making her feel bad about something she's already invested herself in. Also, watch for what your son likes as he begins to express his personality. If he likes the stuff coming from his grandma then that is what really matters.

I would talk up childrens place around then. Or another store you love shopping at for your child. Be excited and tell a story about a shopping trip. My daughter who is 2 picked up horse shirts there and only wanted purple or pink, that is all she likes to wear - an cotton. Now that we do most of our shopping there it makes getting dressed much easier in the busy mornings cause lots of the clothing mixes and matches. We love our trips there. Want to come next time..she's so cute shopping. When she was a baby - i had nothing to say but thank you!!

my MIL is insane, for my sons 4rth bday she bought him a size 10 tshirt, last i checked he's wearing size 3-5. so what i just 'store' this shirt for 5 - 7 years? she's nuttier than a fruit cake. and then this christmas just gone after being told 1 present only, she turns up with 15. wht the heck?!

Honestly, I wouldn't tell her. It's one of those things not even worth bringing up. Save that card for when it's something that may put your son in danger such as smoking around him, junk food etc. I would use those clothes for days he may be doing arts and crafts or getting dirty. Or put them on him take a picture to send to grandma and then promptly take them off! You can always keep them for the days you send him to her house. He'll grow out of them before you know it and maybe she'll catch up in style.

My mil loves nothing more than to find those great deals at yard sales and to buy the cutest outfits for our babies (cute to her anyhow). I wouldn't dream of crushing her by telling her that I'm not fond of her taste or that she buys too many toys. We have a great community swap shop nearby and I either trade or simply donate the grandma items that the kids grow out of or are simply too far out there to use although many are great for grandma playdates. It makes them feel good to do that something special for our kids. Besides when did our society become a place where we want their "gifts" but only if we get to pick them ourselves. That what Mommy shopping days are for.

I received several outfits that I wouldn't dress my DD in from the in-laws. Fake smiles and thank yous go along way (I'm extremely particular about clothing). As soon as I got home or she left, I donated those outfits to goodwill for those less fortunate. Win-Win for me and struggling families in our community. If she asked about the outfit then I politely say it's sitting in the dirty clothes bin (even though I know otherwise) and that I didn't have a chance to do laundry. Pick your battles carefully.

I grew up with hand me downs that were very much out of style (80's clothing in the 90's to give you an idea) because my family was pretty tight. my parents decided if it wasn't ripped, torn or stained then it was perfectly fine. I didn't care before school started, but when school started, I had horrible clothes and the other kids teased me horribly. But prior to school it wasn't an issue. So I would say to respectfully approach it with your MIL and thank her profusely for her generosity and explain your reasons. It may be that she is shopping in the wrong decade like my parents did, or it may be that the slogans on them aren't acceptable to you (I have seen some clothing that the slogans were things like lady's man and the girls love me that were sexual undertoned that i would never put a child in. those i understand. if it is an issue of colors, then tell her your child's coloring would look better in other colors. if it is just you, then stop being petty and thank her for her gifts

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