Thursday, January 19, 2006

The Ultimate Fuck tha Police Machine

Down in Houston, some guy led police on a high-speed chase for a couple of hours earlier today. The chase ended with the perp going the wrong way on an exit ramp in an attempt to continue eluding police, and he crashed into another car. What was the guy driving? A Bimmer, of course -- a brand new E90 330i.

On CNN's front page there's currently a video of the last several minutes of the chase (which might end up in their video list on the front page later on), and that article has a link to a video that has some clips from the chase as well. Now, I'm not condoning what this guy did, but man, it was pretty impressive to watch. The guy spent a lot of time fucking with the other cars, both the cops and other motorists who were trying to help stop him. He'd let someone catch up to him, then he'd just hit the gas and leave them behind. Or he'd let someone get in front of him, only to pull off a precision maneuver to get around them. If you can take out the stupid, it was neat.

He managed to elude the Channel 13 helicopter, which can go 100 miles per hour.

Of course he got away -- the E90 is electronically limited at about 130 MPH. It can easily outrun your pussy chopper.

Officers attempted to use spikes to flatten his tires, but those were ineffectual.

I found this to be particularly hilarious. You know why the spikes didn't work? Because all E90s come equipped with run-flat tires! Apparently, you don't need to limit your speed to 55 MPH when you're running flat on them after all.

From the news reports, it seemed like the people in the car he hit were OK. There was a baby in the car, and this is apparently a huge deal. I'm tired of that shit. They're no more important than other people. I think there was one person in the car who they weren't sure about their condition, but everyone else was fine, including the precious baby. The woman in the passenger seat was definitely fine in terms of physical injuries. Right after the collision she immediately got out of the car, jumped over the hood, and started yelling at the driver. Just not something you see every day.

So yeah, us BMW drivers are a bunch of assholes, but most of us aren't this bad. And again, I'm not condoning this kind of behavior, but I understand. Those cars are neat. Just don't be a dumbfuck and put a bunch of other people at risk when you're driving it, and more importantly, don't bust up your brand-new Bimmer. No, I do not do shit like what this guy did, but yes, I am a bad person.