IS Nothing Safe? Andrew Davidson, 25, shouted “I want to kiss you” and attempted to have sex with a drinks and snacks trolley onboard the train travelling from Aberdeen to Glasgow.

Fiscal depute Jim Eodanable was unimpressed:

“This happened on the train from Dundee to Perth at 5.45 pm.”

Far too early.

“The staff member was serving drinks and snacks from the trolley. The accused had previously asked to purchase a can of beer from her but had been told she had run out. He approached again and tried to engage her in conversation. Just prior to arriving in Dundee station he asked if he could kiss her and she said no. This was heard by passengers who were concerned for her safety. One passenger, who had her daughter with her, decided to keep an eye on the situation. The train stopped and the accused was seen placing his hands on a female passenger leaving the train. The staff member was standing opposite the accused and he grabbed her right arm. He said he was going to kiss her and she broke free.”

“The accused was then seen trying to sit on the lap of another female passenger, before falling onto his face. He was rubbing his chest, sticking his tongue out and shouting about what he wanted to do to his boyfriend. He got back to his feet. He then approached the unattended trolley and started rubbing himself against the trolley. The train had moved off and the British Transport Police were waiting for him in Perth. They found him lying face down near the train door. He indicated that he didn’t remember any of the incident.”