Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Let me back up a few years; in 2001 my mom had a brain aneurism—that was one of the scariest moments that I have ever experienced. Thankfully the aneurism was successfully removed; it left her legally blind (she didn’t have any preferial (sp?) vision)—however Thank God that was the only thing wrong. With a brain aneurism you have a lot of risks that follow…death being the scariest of all.

I will never forget that day, it was something I didn’t ever want to experience again…unfortunately sometimes God has other plans for us…

Yesterday afternoon my world stopped and stood still it seemed…yesterday one of my worst nightmares came true…yesterday my mom called and told me that she had yet another brain aneurism and a brain tumor. This came as a complete shock, she had an MRI last week b/c her Dr. thought she had a stroke...she went yesterday to get her results and thats what we were all expecting, so these 2 things weren't even an option to us...I can’t tell you how I reacted, I still don’t know for sure…I’m scared…sad…mad…upset…worried…confused…every emotion that you can possibly imagine I felt yesterday and feel today. It seems like I am only this “strong” person when I am going through a hard time—when it’s someone I love I turn right back into my “weak” old self…I held it together on the phone, I didn’t want to alarm her or worry her…but inside I am scared to death! Lets face it, my moms health is far from great, she has more health problems than I could ever imagine one person to have…she has been to heck and back it seems…I do not want her to go through this again, I don’t want to experience all these emotions again…is that selfish of me? I just keep telling myself that God has a plan…God has his reasons…God is in control…

We do not know the severity of either yet, she goes in next week sometime to have an angiogram and that’s when we will find out how bad each are…please lift her up in prayers.

I debated a long time whether to write this blog or not…I really want as many prayers as I can possibly get…however talking about it isn’t easy right now. So yesterday there was only a hand full of people who I told…this isn’t easy, I rarely get “down”, but yesterday was a very “down” day for me…I am sure work being stressful…and Zach’s grandpa not doing too well didn’t help the situation either, this was just like the icing on the cake. I know though posting this is something I NEED to do; you all have been nothing but wonderful to me…you have prayed many nights for me and my husband, now I ask…can you please pray for my mother.

“Without Faith nothing is possible….with it, nothing is impossible”

I have this on a magnet that hangs by my desk…I sometimes catch myself staring at it and just reading it over and over again…FAITH is the thing that has gotten me through my tough situations and I know having Faith will get me through this as well. God is amazing, he is our refuge, all we have to do is lean on him and he will guide us through this journey of heartache. He knows all…and with him, all things are possible!

Thank you for the prayers, I can not begin to tell you how much they mean to me…I will post more when I know more

26 comments:

i said all this yesterday, but just wanted to "reassure" you that we're def keeping yall & your mom in our prayers! if there's anything yall need, let us know! i hope it all comes out ok for everybody! love ya!

No u need to post things like this and get it out of u! My grandpa died of a stomach aneurism so i know what ur going thru. But if it were my mom I would be the same way u are. We cant all be strong all the time. Sometimes we NEED to just cry and have our "weak" moments. Its nothing to be ashamed of. I am praying for ur mom. I remember her from Whitneys house & shes a ton of fun & so sweet! ~Blessings~

Hey, sweetie!! I am glad that you ended up blogging about this!! I know that yesterday was a really hard day for you and I am soo sorry that you are having to go thru this again. I know you may feel weak right now, but stay strong for your mom. You are soo positive and I couldn't think of a better person to have by my side if I were going thru a tough situation. You will keep her positive and you are def. the support that she needs!! We will be saying lots and lots of prayers!!

So sorry to hear the news of your mom. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I have been reading your blog for a couple of weeks and I am inspired by your faith, your strength, and your positive outlook on life. I'm praying for your mom and your family.

ps. I know this is a bad time, but I also wanted to tell you that I nominated you for an award

I am so sorry you have to go through this again. It breaks my heart, I was so upset for you when you emailed me yesterday. I am glad you felt you could come to me. I know we are just now getting back in touch since school and really beginning to have a friendship. But I value our friendship in so many ways. You are such an amazing person Tiffany, you hang in there. You and your mom will get through this together. I have been praying for her, you, Zach, and his grandfather and that will continue. Keep your faith and stay strong. Love you!!!!

Your in my prayers darling!! I know that you will overcome this struggle just like you have overcome all the other struggles in your life. With grace and love for God no matter what. You are such a wonderful person. I don't know you in life, but I've been reading your blog for about a year and a half now and I feel like I know you. I feel so bad to know the struggles that you have, but you always come through shining gloriously!!

I'm so sorry you and your family are going through this. Rest assured, our God is alive and active, He has risen, and the story doesn't end there. I'll be praying for comfort, peace, and complete healing. Hang in there and please keep us posted.

I'm so sorry your having to go through this. I'll be praying very hard for you & your mother. I unfortunatly know what its like to lose a parent.. My heart goes out to you. God is in control & will help you in this trying time:)

Yes... peripheral... my hubby is legally blind in his left eye because his retina detached when he was 18 months old. So he has ONLY peripheral vision but no straight on vision... kind of the opposite of your mommy.