I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the delusion that I was changing because my routine was being manhandled by school from the perspective that to do well on a test, I would have to actually do work, the kind that everyone does the same way and cannot be transferred.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that I must be forced into the routine because school is superior to me because of representing a bank of knowledge.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame ‘something’ to be brainwashing me, meanwhile I had done no investigation or even identified what changed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that I must be careful of what I place into routine because I could be benefitting someone with less payoff/profit than what I would have been earning in the market system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that others could manipulate me without me knowing about it. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place myself into a position of apparent victim to/towards others out of the paranoia that others could manipulate me to make me sabotage my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that my routine is out of my control out of the excuse/justification that for me to stay in school, I must do all the tests and pass them, and to do all the tests my routine must give time to study for the test, and I wake up to go to school.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the conclusion that school is controlling me out of the justification that if I fail a few tests, I will probably be kicked out and with this kicked out of everything I have in an instant.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my daily routine according to an abstraction of money that I exchange to be capable of pleasing everyone that decide my access to money, wherein in my Mind I believe people may like opposite traits and I have to please most if not all of them; one person disliking me is more chance of being kicked out, and I have to please all to survive with one routine.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the actual doing of a routine according to PLEASING OTHERS so that others are pleased and give me more rewards, but I must apparently search out there for means/methods/’skillful procedures’ to remain at the top of the pile and feel like I am on the top of the pile.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine an entity as school preordaining my routine because I concluded within myself that I had to be what others liked to be accepted, and this meant doing work to other’s standard of perfection like a test at school, and even invalidating my own common sense to fulfill other’s standard as I also had to prove to others I can be trusted with their life.

In this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that trust is built between two individuals by/through one individual breaking his own rules to benefit the other, in this ignoring the actual doing required to be able to trust myself so that I prove to myself first that I can be trusted with responsibility.

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About Kasper Kwan

Currently supporting myself in the process of establishing my words in the physical principles of Oneness and Equality. Had to start this process because I have allowed and accepted my words to be established in the mental idea of self-interest/greed, and only realised this recently.