I wasn't planning on posting until I finished writing, but I have played through MOST of Soul Silver, (I say most because I'm planning on recording the battle against Red.) but with the thread bumped I feel like I have to say my plan was to get through Johto then start writing so I'd have an ahead start then start posting... Needless to say, that didn't go too well with writing motivation. My current plan is to post the entire playthrough/fanfiction at one on a fan fiction website then linking it.

After I post Soul Silver don't expect anything else soon. Pokemon Black looks extremely painful if you stick to no Potions in battle, which I plan on doing because I don't value my sanity. If anyone else does it, I highly recommend spamming Potions against the first N battle because the alternative involves soft resetting for a 1/100 Snivy with 13 Defense and that's just the tip of the iceberg.

For now, I have this.

Pokemon Emerald Status Moves Only

Climmy: I challenged your daughter. Can I have Pokeballs now?
Birch: Are you sure you challenged her? She hasn’t come back yet.
Climmy: I’ll challenge her again.

Later...

Climmy: Is May back yet?
Birch: No.
Climmy: Can I have Pokeballs now?
Birch: No.
Climmy: Screw you, I’m out. Hoenn can drown and burn for all I care.

The End!

Note: This is Barely Arguably Hypothetically Possible. (Yes, I had to use two words that effectively mean “kind of, but not really” to come close enough.) In the following we’re assuming perfect luck through extreme Random Number Generator (RNG for short) manipulation.

The key to this the Hypothetically possibility is that Tackle has 95 Accuracy in Gen III.

If the goal is complete the game without using attacks, then you can “fight” wild Poochyena on Route 103 that only know Tackle, which has 35 PP vs Growl’s 40 PP. You can survive Struggle if you use a Potion, which you’ll be able to get 11 of (1 from free a gift and 10 from spending all your money.) which is how you can Level Up your starter (unless it’s Treecko, which has the 30 PP Leer.) Mudkip learns Mud Slap at Level 6, so it’s not worth Leveling it up. If you go with Torchic you get Focus Energy at Level 7. It takes 4 Level 4 Poochyena for that much experience, so that takes 4 Potions. The Rival’s Mudkip has Tackle and Growl for 75 PP total, but Torchic’s Focus Energy and Growl have only 70 PP. If you add the 7 potions you have left, (You can use them to take up turns if you let Tackle hit.) you get 77 Turns total. That gives Mudkip 2 turns for Struggle which deals 6 Damage to itself per Max Damage Critical Hit against a 0 IV -Def Nature Torchic for 12 total, 8 short of the 20 needed. (For insult to injury, Treecko and Mudkip both learn their first moves at Level 6. If Torchic learned its first move at Level 6 instead of 7 like the other starters, then you would be able to save two potions by only Leveling Up once instead of twice, which is exactly how many more you need for this to be hypothetically possible. (If this was possible, I’d be tempted to make a Pokemon Emerald Status Moves Only Tool Assisted “Speedrun.”)

If the goal of the run to complete the game without dealing damage with attacks, which adds a loophole that lets you attack as long as you miss, you can pick Mudkip for 75 PP between Tackle and Growl. If Treecko uses Pound 35 times before using Leer at all and you use Growl, then Tackle will deal 3 Damage before Growl and 2 after any amount of Growls, for 71 Damage total, which you can heal. Even if you let Leer happen, -6 Attack from Growl cancels out the -6 from Leer and you’d take 105 Damage total, which you can still heal. (Personally, I don’t think this counts, but if someone wants to make a Tool Assisted “Speedrun” of it... :P)

If the goal is to do anything with Treecko in this kind of challenge, you’re screwed. Treecko has Leer which has less PP than Tackle, so you’ll be forced to attack before the opponent is forced to use Struggle. That said, I’d pick Treecko just because it cuts off any impossible hypothetical possibilities of being able to do anything. If you disagree, think about the odds a 5% chance happening 35 times in a row.

Edit: I'd post this in the Sword/Shield discussion, but it feels like stating the obvious like and too much like self promotion.

I thought it would be funny to upload an unbelievable playthrough an April Fools Day so people would think it's an overly elaborate joke. The actual joke is, it's real. (That said, I'm pretty sure most people here already knew it was real.)

It's not all posted yet, but I should be copy/pasting faster than you can read.
Edit: I've now posted everything I've done except for stealing Leftovers form the Snorlax that respawns if you don't catch it and finding a Shiny Sentret on Route 29 because I have to go through that Route just to withdraw my Pokemon that knows Fly. (Why do starting towns, other than the one in B2/W2, never have Pokemon Centers?)

The bad news is I don't have the "battle" against Red yet, but I should be able to record it by the end of the week. After that, I have to figure out how to sync Audio and Video because I record them separately. (It's either that or recording the sound of my breathing on the camera.)

I was able to record a few complete battles against Red, but I didn't get the showboating I wanted in any of them because Charizard keeps using Flare Blitz instead of Blast Burn. I feel like I need the showboating I planned because the battle against Red should be a, if not the, highlight of the play through and the current highlight is insane.

I pretty much promised a video today at the latest, so it's a good thing the Vs Recorder let me record my current highlight.

Vs Tower Tycoon Palmer (Round 3)

(Sorry about the video quality. I don't have a capture card.)

The Battle Frontier is the only way to get TM 06 is Soul Silver. If there was any other way then I wouldn't have spent a month grinding there and and EV Training after going mad about loosing so much in the tower...

First of all, I’d like to frantically beg for forgiveness. Ahem... I’m so sorry this took so long, please don’t kill me! I’m sorry I screwed up enough to make this take over a week!

With that out of the way, let me explain why this took so long. Winning against Red was my secondary goal. The primary goal, destroy Charizard.

The problem was that Charizard’s Flare Blitz’s recoil damage ruins what I’m trying to show off, so I wanted Charizard to use Blast Burn against Meganium instead, but the AI doesn’t like using Hyper Beam moves and would always use Flare Blitz as long as it could OHKO Meganium. Meganium’s EVs were 255 HP/124-127 Def/124-127 SpD which is pretty amazing considering all I did to balance the Defense stats was EV train in Special Defense once HP was maxed out. I had bought a Power Belt with my extra BP and could update the stats by using EV reducing berries, (In Gen 4 stats don’t get updated until you Level Up or force an update with an item that affects EVs.) so I could adjust the EVs slightly. I changed to 255 HP/155 Def/100 SpD and I thought I was fine... then after a week of trying, failing, and rage quitting I realized I had miscalculated the amount of HP Meganium would have after a turn in the Sandstorm. Turns out, it was exactly the amount Flare Blitz could deal with maximum damage. I shifted 20 more EVs from Special Defense to Defense and then it finally happened... after a few more tries... Blast Burn was still not guarantee... Also, when I adjusted EVs I had to mess with the date for Diamond Dust to come back, which made it so I had to wait for 24 Hours and 2 Minutes. (The date has to roll over twice, so I have to set the time to 23:59 Feb 27, 2020 then wait for 00:01 Feb 29, 2020.)

The good news is after enough failed attempts I had a consistent plan. The bad news, taking down Pikachu takes 5 Minutes and Thunderbolt has side effects that can, and will, screw you over. (My plan for dealing with these is pray they don’t happen.) Paralysis means you have to pray harder (Spoiler: praying usually doesn’t work.) and a Critical Hit is either an OHKO from full health or leaves you at something like 6 HP. You’re not healing enough to survive the Thunderbolt after that...

Here's the video.

Here's my plan if you don't want to watch the video or if you just want to read it anyway.

Before I arrived at the peak, I had to make the Diamond Dust Easter Egg happen. It’s supposed to do nothing, but because it’s the weather instead of the blizzard that’s supposed to be always happening, Hail doesn’t happen during the challenge. (I know it’s ironic that I’m going out of my way to avoid a passive health drain.) Honestly, discovering this was just luck, but if I discover something I can use to my advantage, I will abuse it.

Against Pikachu I lead with Meganium and use Leech Seed, Grass Whistle until it works, then Synthesis before switching to Forretress. (If too much damage is taken for one Synthesis, Rage Quit. Also, there’s not much gained from trying for Grass Whistle instead of just using Synthesis to heal off two Iron Tails, but it’s deal with luck sooner so you’ll have to deal will less luck later.) If Pikachu’s sleep lasts one turn, it will use Iron Tail when I switch to Forretress, but it can be fully healed by Leech Seed and Leftovers or come within about 3 HP of a full heal. If Iron Tail lowers Defense, Rage Quit. Volt Tackle will deal more than Thunderbolt and the recoil means I have too little time to set up. If sleep lasts two turns, it didn’t save Forretress from any hits, but I didn’t really need to. If sleep lasts three or more turns, each of those turns is a free chance for Entry Hazards. While Pikachu is awake, alternating between Entry Hazards and Protect gives you enough healing for one layer of Toxic Spikes, three layers of Spikes, and Stealth Rock. (I could go for two layers of Toxic Spikes, but you’ll see why I don’t.) After Forretress’s job is done I switch to Tyranitar. I then use Protect to almost fully heal the damage Thunderbolt dealt during the switch, and that’s usually when Pikachu faints. If Pikachu endures, I don’t have anything better to do than try for Protect again and Iron Tail only deals about 100 Damage, so I don’t care.

Blastoise will be sent in next because I have Tyranitar out and Blastoise knows Focus Blast. I switch to Lunatone to take it because I actually want it to take damage. If Focus Blast misses, I keep Lunatone in to take a Flash Cannon. After that, or if Focus Blast hits, I switch back to Tyranitar incase Blastoise tries to KO with Hydro Cannon. (Although the AI usually goes for moves that can KO, it will sometimes not try to KO with a Hyper Beam move.) If Hydro Cannon is used, I waste a turn then use Protect Blastoise uses its final move before fainting. If Flash Cannon is used, I use Protect twice. After the first Protect, Focus Blast can’t KO Tyranitar, (I know this because I found out that the AI will not use a Hyper Beam move if another move can KO the opponent.) so I have to keep Tyranitar because Lunatone will get KOed by Hydro Cannon if it gets used.

The third Pokemon will be Lapras. I switch to Lunatone while Lapras uses Brine, which will deal enough damage after Blastoise’s attack to lower Lunatone’s HP below half. (Brine is a Power 65 move that deals double damage if the target is below half health. Of all the Water moves to give Red’s Lapras, Brine? Really?) I use Gravity and let Lunatone get KOed by the second Brine. I sent in Meganium to lure make Red send in Charizard next and use Protect to block Blizzard. After that, Lapras faints.

Now Charizard is sent in. I use Leech Seed then Rage Quit if Flare Blitz is used. When Blast Burn was used, Meganium survived by eating an Occa Berry to cancel out the Fire weakness, but a power 150 STAB boosted by the ability Blaze still ****ing hurt. By ****ing hurt, I mean 44 HP left hurt. Everything I did to Charizard hurt more though.

Charizard took 8/16 HP from Stealth Rock, 4/16 from Spikes because of Gravity, 2/16 from Toxic Spikes’s Poison, 2/16 because Meganium endured to use Leech Seed, and 1/16 form Tyranitar’s Sand Stream. That adds up to 17/16 in One Turn! That sounds like slight overkill, but because the damage is rounded down, the Sandstorm's apparent overkill was needed.

Against Venusuar and Snorlax I don’t really have a plan, but Forretress walls them, so I don’t need one. I switch to Ninetales after Frenzy Plant for Will-o-Wisp, but other than that, it’s have Forretress out heal Venusaur’s Grass and Poison attacks. (The latter is easier.) Snorlax is also walled by Tyranitar, who knows Toxic for when a Full Restore is used and Rest if he somehow takes enough damage from Blizzard to need it.

In the try where Charizard finally used Blast Burn, at one point against Snorlax I had a feeling that I should waste a turn before using Roar to force Venusaur back in, but I ignored it. Venusaur took entry hazard damage then fainted to Sandstorm and his burn then Snorlax returns and endured the entry hazards with an HP bar that looked empty then Red used a Full Restore.

News about future playthroughs:

I have lots of time before I beat my first trainer in Black, so I'm going to learn how to make better videos before then. That said, the photage quality will remain as bad as it is now because I don't have a capture card. The good news is I jailbroke my 3DS, so I can have good quality for Y, Ultra Moon, and Omega Ruby if that game is possible. (Yes, I'm playing every game I can this way.) I'm also going to buy a Switch Capture card and hope Shield is possible without attacking. (It probably will be.)

Why Pokemon Black: Status Moves Only Sucks

If you fully commit to “No Items in Battle” then you are going to hate life. If you want to do this challenge and value your sanity, use Potions against N! You do not want to do what I'm doing.

To start you need a +Def Nature Snivy with an IV of 30 or 31 in Defense, (1/100 or 1% Chance. If you reset on Lax, which is +Def -SpD, then it’s a 1/133.33... or 0.75% chance.) Preferably with 20 or 21 HP. (20 is an HP IV of 10+ and 21 is 30+) Wait, it gets stupider. You have to then catch some Level 4 Pokemon to take hits because you’re not stalling out 35 PP of Tackle and 5 Struggles with just Snivy and you want them to have 9 Defense, so they can take less damage from N’s Purloin’s Scratch after a Level Up. To get experience you need to find a Level 2 Pokemon with a -Atk Nature and spam Leer. (Finding a Level 2 -Atk Nature Pokemon is an 8/125 chance, which is about 1/15.5 or 6.4%) If it has a -Atk Nature then 15 out of 16 attacks will deal 1 Damage to Snivy, and 1 out of 16 will deal 3. (From now on, I will call the 1/16 chance a “Max Damage Hit” or “Max Hit” for short.) On top of that, Critical Hits have a 1 in 16 chance of happening and deal 4 Damage! (Max Crits deal 6. I’d say the game was being cruel, but honestly, you’re doing this to yourself.) To the rest of your team, Tackle will deal 3 Damage or 4 from a Max Hit, so they’re 6HKOed if there’s no Critical Hits. That said, Critical Hits do 7 Damage and Max Crits deal 9, so expect a few of them to get 5HKOed or even 4HKOed. You have to endure 35 Turns of Tackle then 5 of Struggle for 40 Total, and not counting Max Hits or Critical Hits, you have 48 to 50 Turns depending on Snivy’s HP. Counting Max Hits and Crits, you lose 2 turns when Snivy takes a Max Hit, 3 from a Critical Hit, and 1 or 2 when someone else takes a Critical Hit and you can only lose 8 to 10 turns to luck before you lose. Also, Snivy only gets 12 Exp per Patrat and 13 per Lillipup at Level 5 and needs 44 for Level 6...

Long Story Short, No Potions and No Attacks means you’re playing Pokemon Black Kaizo, complete with traps that can kill you when you think you’ve already won. Honestly, I'm mostly doing it this way because I want to see how long it takes.