Indians rejoice over new bullet train tracks as Modi government fulfills promise of new toilets

It was a time to celebrate for millions of people living next to railway tracks as the Railway Minister announced the launch of bullet trains in India, one of the most awaited plans during this years railway budget.

Modi government’s pre-poll promise of constructing new toilets for people was expected during this years general budget, but the announcement of the new railway tracks has left the aam aadmi surprised and elated.

Old model toilet.

Shyam, a person who has to walk nearly 5 kms everyday to address the nature’s call every morning, was extremely excited on hearing this news and welcomed this new move by the government to bring toilets closer to home.

“I would like to thank Mr. Modi and the railway minister from the bottom of my heart for finally listening to the aam aadmi and constructing railway tracks near our homes,” said Shyam who broke down into tears while talking to Faking News.

But some people are disappointed with this move as their long standing demands have still not been addressed by the new government. “We have been demanding the government to install taps and provide free liquid soap next to railway lines so that we don’t have to carry bottles everyday, but the government has completely ignored our demands even in this budget,” said Shyam’s brother.

The railway minister dedicated the Delhi-Ahemdabad train corridor to the people and said that ache din start only when people have start their day on the right track and this one is in fact a world class way to start the day.

Some people are quite skeptical over the announcement of the bullet train tracks as these trains are expected to run at very high speeds. These people are concerned that they may never get a chance to s(h)it peacefully on the tracks as these trains will not be visible from long distances and may actually run over them.

Munna, who has five toilets at home but is still a frequent user of the railway tracks, said that these tracks were actually not recommended for people as earlier the trains would come near them and stop until they finish their “work”, but now the trains would actually run over them.

“That would be an embarrassing position to die in,” Munna said. On being asked why he prefers railway tracks over the toilets in his home, he answered that he loves the way people peek out of the train windows when he is s(h)itting on the tracks, and that helps him stay fresh and light all day long.

Meanwhile, Mr. Arvind Kejriwal called the budget a ‘farce’ and promised to provide free water and soap to people living close to the railway tracks in case his government is voted to power in the next elections.