I recently shared a pic on Instagram of a car spray-painted with the words ‘I hope she was worth it’. If pictures tell a thousand words, that one is definitely an entire novel.

But it does beg the question: is revenge really sweet? Is it something you should do yourself when someone wrongs you? Hell to the no. And here’s why, kids.

Because it makes you feel worse. Seriously, the amusement or retribution you may feel in the moment will dissipate fast. There’s something to be said for being the dignified one after a break-up.

It gives your ex more ammo. If he or she thought you were batshit crazy before, doing something ridiculous like cutting off one leg of every pair of their jeans or hiding prawn shells in the curtain rods will not only convince them further of your dubious sanity, but give them a ‘my ex is nuts’ funny story to share with their mates. And that shit can follow you around for years.

It’ll make future partners think twice about dating you. No one wants to go into a love match fearful of what their date might do if things truly go pear-shaped.

It prolongs the ‘angry’ stage. And really, don’t you want to be getting the heck out of that stage and into the ‘healing and moving on’ stage as soon as humanly possible?

It may have ripple effects you didn’t intend. In the age of social media, your actions can be widely shared and once they’re out there, they’re out there for life. Parents, current or future employers can find out your history from a little Googling – and will – and there’s not a lot you can do about it.

So there you have it. Think about it, fantasise about it, heck – write a list of what you’d like to do and publish it here. But when it comes to actually doing it… go sit on your hands and watch 10 or so episodes of something really distracting. Like Vanderpump Rules.

Have you ever taken revenge after a break-up? Do you regret it? Or has an ex taken revenge against you?

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Letter To My Ex is run by journalist and blogger Rachel Smith. Write a letter of your own, read thousands of letters from all over the world or check out the latest on the blog, where we touch on everything to do with break-ups, exes, single life, dating and relationships in general.
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