7/07/2014

The Rude Pundit spent 4th of July weekend having a merry time in Chicago, one of his favorite places on this entire overheating planet. It was a mighty fine few days, filled with good friends, good weed, good food, good booze, good weather, and good music. He hadn't been to Chicago since 2007, so the Rude Pundit was thrilled to rediscover his love for that enormous town, spread out there like it's hugging Lake Michigan with two brawny, filthy arms.

Then he hopped on the computer this morning after sleeping it off last night to see that at least 60 people were shot, with at least 11 dead, in Chicago this weekend. The Rude Pundit didn't spend any time in the south or west sides of the city, where nearly all the shootings occurred. He isn't a young black or Hispanic male, who were nearly all the victims. It was hidden from view, in its way, the violence. While he was dancing drunkenly, he didn't realize that he was two-stepping on the edge of a pit, ready to plunge in.

Don't worry, people tell the Rude Pundit constantly, don't worry so much. It'll be fine. It's not so bad. Except it is. With every issue, with every thing, it's almost always as bad as it can be. For instance:

1. The Hobby Lobby contraception coverage case, we're told, isn't a disaster yet. It's only a narrow decision. It's only focused on supposed abortifacient drugs. It might not apply to other corporations, nonprofits, and colleges seeking exemptions from the rules of the Affordable Care Act and HHS. Except we already know it's worse. We already know that the justices have said that it applies to all forms of birth control for women. And it's going to get worse because of the Trojan horse in the decision that's gonna blow up like an IED with a truck heading its way.

See, the most insidious part of the decision isn't Justice Alito's assertion that if contraception offends your particular flavor of Sky Wizard, then fuck the Constitution and let's all bow down before your fictional delusion. That's bad enough, sure. But Alito wrote, "[A]ccording to their religious beliefs the four contraceptive methods at issue are abortifacients." As the Rude Pundit wrote last week, "belief" trumps science. Faith trumps facts.

To tease this out a bit, it's not merely that your religious beliefs compel you not to use or fund contraception. It's that your religious beliefs compel you to disbelieve science. That's some scary shit right there. Because, see, it's another thing entirely for the Supreme Court to declare that science doesn't matter. And while people tell us to calm the fuck down, that this ain't that bad, no, fuck that. This Supreme Court is that bad, despite the noble efforts of the women on the Court.

Think about how that willful disbelief in science can apply. If Cargill, a closely-held corporation, says that its church doesn't believe that climate change is human-made, does that mean it can ignore pollution mandate? Can Chick-fil-A claim that its owners' religion says that homosexuality is a learned behavior, not genetic trait so, fuck you, queers, go home? Just think of all the laws you can toss out if you have a religious belief that is total bullshit, but sincerely held. Koch Industries was just told, "Go nuts, motherfuckers. Have blood orgies to your mad gods and sacrifice virgins to the oil demons, if that's what you believe." Walmart can finally make lard a sacrament.

Yeah, this shit's gonna go nuts. But not just because corporate Christians see a way to assert control over their heathen employees. It's because all of a sudden, logic, really, dictates that these entities are treated the same way that Hobby Lobby was. Of course, "logic" is a part of science, so maybe the Supreme Court doesn't believe in that anymore.