2013年11月30日 星期六

Peer Response 3

1.[蘇俞臻]:I think your topic is too long, maybe you can concise it and make it be more powerful. And in your second paragraph, "Though he got married, he never tells her about his desire deep in mind." I think that changing the word "her" to "his wife" will be better, because this is your first sentence which has mentioned his wife, if you only use "her" to describe, it will make readers a little confused. Besides, in my opinion, I still insist that the cheated person has to be blamed, though I have compassion to his childhood. However, this cannot be a reason for him to hurt his spouse! It just like if a person experienced domestic violence as he was a child, so he has the right to do that on his/her family without being blamed! [Me]: OK! I will change my title and replace "her" with "his wife."But in my opinion, we cannot choose our parents and thus have to accept the childhood they give us. It is unavoidable, so adultery is forgivable.2.[Yachu Mo]:your topic is too long that will make us lose the focusand after i read your annotation, i feel that it is hard to know your standpoint until the end.i think you can make your standpoint clearly.i still think that Adultery can't be forgive because the one you cheat on didn't have the responsibility to accept the hurt you gave even though you have a bad childhood. However, it is not his or her fault. [Me]:As you said "it is not his or her fault", so adultery is forgivable.Anyway, thank for your comment, and I will revise my annotation 2 based on these suggestions.3. [Siou-jyun Huang]:I think you were too nervous in your presentation.Your viewpoint was strong and you have to have confidence in it. [Me]:Thank for your words of cheer! I will show my confidence in next presentation.4.[Chen Joselin]:Actually, I think you and your partner are talking about different topic.I can't agree with Adultery at all. You have hurt your lover and cheat those who believe you. No matter how old are you, you shouldn't have an affair. [Me]:

well...please calm down.We are talking about the same topic. And though you cannot accept adultery, it exist anyway and has positive effects.

5.[黃毓婷]:

your speaking is really clear. good pacing!ur perspective in this article is really special and interesting, which surprices me how much that your childhoom influences your future even self. The emptiness and lonliness inserted into ur heart due to parents' indifference may have a great impact to childen's personalitis. but , I think that u make the incident of "adultery" too reasonable although you connect it to the faults which parents have made. Maybe u can explaion more about the "emptiness" or find some sources from psychologic aspects, which can clear up your points. Also, come up with some examples of how parents mistake their children might be helpful.:)

[Me]:

OK! Thank for your detailed analysis and suggestion. I will take them into account.

6.[Robert Ching]:

I can see that you are well prepared for your presentation. You demonstrated your confidence in your speech. Also I like how you include like a little story in your annotation 2. Not only does it strengthen your point but also make it more persuasive and realistic. However, I do not agree with your point about committing adultery. Although there maybe reasonable reasons for it to happen, I still think it will leave a negative impact on the innocent children.

[Me]:

Thank for your compliment:))

Although you stand on the side against mine, I can imagine you may change your idea toward adultery after you see whole my annotations.

7.[Lisa Yu]:

The story you tell makes your statement much clearer, and the presentation will be better if you don't keep looking at the note. I think that the positive case you say is the minority, but I believe that most extramarital affairs have their reasons.

[Me]:

Although it is the minority, it just exists. We cannot deny its existence, so why not just trying to understand its causes and admit it is forgivable?