This Frolics weekend, McHugh’s disease resulted in her vicious death as she danced unabashedly to All Star’s “Smash Mouth” on the porch of FIJI, where a large angry mob of Union Board members preceded to strangle her with fanny packs and free t-shirts.

Union Board members were later seen toting parts of her limbs and relics of her clothing for the upcoming “Human Dismemberment DIY” event.

McHugh’s battle with IPAD has been well-documented on the Facebook page and in her various social-media-attention-seeking escapades of yore. Many students were both saddened and others
delighted by McHugh’s untimely death.

Friends and family of McHugh remember the vivacious young woman for her spunk, ability to burn bridges without second thought, and an aggressive loyalty to the arts as evidenced in an aggressive defense of the Union Piano and public ukulele singing.

“She inspired me to hate like I’ve never hated before. Oops isn’t funny. The Yowl isn’t funny. Ukuleles are dumb and I hate blonde people,” said a Union Board member who will remain anonymous.

McHugh will be remembered for her legacy as the campus lightning rod who inspired annoyance and rage in her fellow students due to her inflammatory opinions regarding vaginal health and the
band Moon Taxi.

According to several eye-witness reports, McHugh’s last words were heard as such:

“Sure, I’ve had my enemies. Sure, I’ve had my moments of hypocrisy. Sure, I’ve been rejected by the other late, great Yowl editor, Paul Henderson. Love you always, Paul, btw. But I’ll be damned if I won’t be remembered.”

And remembered she certainly shall be.

In all seriousness (not something we’re used to here), we at The Yowl will miss our soon to be dearly departed Sofly Sophie very much. She has ferried this publication –the most important campus publication above Liburdas, the fun facts about sexual health in the library bathroom stalls, and the not alt-right, alt-right magazine courtesy of Benny Boy– through censorship, the #haterz, and a litany of problematic Yowl submissions (looking at you Leo). She is our fun, free-spirited liberal arts grad, and we will be sad to see her go off to the big, bad, adult world. We hope she’ll be able to use her experience here at our humble satire publication to make mad bank. But we sincerely, sincerely doubt it. Love you Sophie!