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Hitman

Synopsis

Assassin 47

The best-selling videogame, Hitman, roars to life with both barrels blazing in this hardcore action-thriller starring Timothy Olyphant. A genetically engineered assassin with deadly aim, known only as "Agent 47" eliminates strategic targets for a top-secret organization. But when he's double-crossed, the hunter becomes the prey as 47 finds himself in a life-or-death game of international intrigue.

I'm not a gamer so I have no idea how this stacks up against the video-game it's based on. It is however nowhere near as bad as I thought it might be considering the horrendous reviews I'd read for it. Action aplenty, a super hot femme-fatale and a protagonist with an incredibly shiny head, what's not to like? Apart from a truly dreadful script and some awful acting, this is a lot of fun. Action films usually fall down when trying to be more than just popcorn entertainment. This one never flatters to deceive us though, this is a full on action film with a plot as confusing as why Hitman 47 doesn't give Olga Kurylenko one just for the…

A slick videogame adaptation in which people actually bleed, Hitman is over-edited and badly scripted but that never prevents it from being any better or worse than a forgettable Bond or Bourne movie.

Those who have played the game will recognise the set-up, a barcoded assassin with no personality is assigned stealthy missions which he must carry out as competently as possible. What gamers might be a little unsatisfied with is the necessary inclusion of a plot which rolls into motion fairly quickly and slowly tumbles its way into forgettable territory.

The casting of Timothy Olyphant strikes me as odd given the amount of already bald and notably beefier actors who would’ve filled the vapid role as the man who…

Video game movie adaptations have an incredibly bad rep, and with very good reason. Taking a video game's environments and characters and giving them new faces and voices with a set story somehow just doesn't fit in as well as it seems it should. Now, I enjoy Tomb Raider for what it is: good, mindless fun, but nothing memorable. Hitman had a lot wrong with it, but there were also some redeeming qualities that let me enjoy it.

"How does a good man kill?" mused Timothy Olyphant as he held a supposed target at gunpoint. Indeed, how does an assassin, who is supposed to have no conscience of his own, kill…

I don't have any connection with the Hitman video games as I've never played them, but relatively low expectations ultimately set the tone for what I were to come out thinking of the film adaptation. But at its worst, there really was nothing particularly offensive to note (I'd only imagine that I can take greater offense if I had any connection with the games) other than just the sheer feeling of emptiness that ran all throughout. Unfortunately, there was also not very much good being left behind at the same time and instead, Hitman just leaves an empty aura all around - one that is soon to fade away from the memory after having viewed the film. I can assume…

I love Xavier Gens and Timothy Olyphant (oily elephant) and my favourite hack Skip Woods wrote this so it should be an instant classic. Hitman is like Mario except he's a bald guy with a barcode tattooed on his head and he kills people. He's number 47 because at the beginning there sure are a lot of bald kids with tattoos and guns. Olyphant looks so weird without hair, too used to Justified. It's all secret murder organisations and throat bombs and shit. Olga Kurylenko is the girl with the shitty dragon tattoo and "my first goth" outfit. Olyphant crashes through a window in a hotel to find some kids playing one of the Hitman games, haha they did a…

Amateurishly written, directed, edited, starring a completely miscast protagonist* and stuffed with unexciting action scenes. Even a very forgiving b-action movie fan like me can't find much to like about it.

*At that time Olyphant was miscast in everything, but I'm glad that Hollywood didn't give up on him, since he was surprisngly perfect in JUSTIFIED years later.

I don't have any connection with the Hitman video games as I've never played them, but relatively low expectations ultimately set the tone for what I were to come out thinking of the film adaptation. But at its worst, there really was nothing particularly offensive to note (I'd only imagine that I can take greater offense if I had any connection with the games) other than just the sheer feeling of emptiness that ran all throughout. Unfortunately, there was also not very much good being left behind at the same time and instead, Hitman just leaves an empty aura all around - one that is soon to fade away from the memory after having viewed the film. I can assume…

Wow, I don't think I've ever been that bored while watching an action movie. I actually passed out for a bit towards the end, (I'm not factoring in the fact that I worked until 2 a.m. and had to be up for school at 8 because I can watch a movie after very little sleep if its captivating enough)

I don't think I missed anything of importance because nothing that happens in this was relevant to the plot. Why? Because there is no plot. Main character gets set up by his agency. Why? Wasn't explained. He has to rescue and protect this girl. Why? Reasons unknown. In one scene edit she goes from hating him to loving him. How?…

So here we have “Hitman” a dumb video game movie. For what it’s worth I fairly enjoyed this movie. It really wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I know that “Hitman: Agent 47” is way worse but this one was also known as being pretty bad. Now the story is alright, basically Agent 47 is called to take out the president of Russia. When he does it turns out that the president is still alive and he was set up. And so he must go after the real president and kill him. The action was also just alright. Most of the action scenes were slow but a couple were pretty good. One in a hotel and one in a casino. But really this was just a mediocre action movie. But I did enjoy it, I would give “Hitman” a 5.5/10 “It’s Decent”.