Got in 2 walks today and think I’ll get a routine of 3 walks a day going tomorrow. I sleep well, but the down side is I’m stiff as a board in the morning or if I sit for a couple of hours or more at a time.

At 6:53 PM -0800 1/28/06, someone asked:
>Hey Don-
>Im glad you are home! I bet its much better to be at home than at the hospital.
>I hope you continue to recover well. Is your pain real bad?
>love you

This is just an effort to record my experience as I recall it. Appreciation for prayers & love from friends, family and pastors will follow.

I reported for pre-op at 5:30, very easy to find parking at that hour.
Gave blood for typing and screening, listened to a couple more horror stories about hospitals from dear friends & family (note for future … don’t do that).

Then chatted with the Doc, agreed on a plan about 7:45 and dozed off about 8.

Prep and surgery lasted from about 8:00 to 11:00 and recovery from about 11:00 to 14:00. I was in my room about 14:00.

According to Jo Ann, the Doc said visually things look good. He could see the nerve bundles clearly and feels they were spared. No visual evidence of cancer outside the prostate. We should have biopsies of the prostate and lymph nodes nearest the prostate Friday.

I’m feeling good and I was very happy to see faces of family & friends as I was wheeled up to my room.

Monday evening I sat up on the side of my bed and then stood beside the bed with the care of Jo Ann and a nurse. I slept very well Monday night without aid of morphine from 11:40 to about 5:30 and then dozed from 5:30 to 7:00 trying to give Jo Ann as much opportunity for sleep as possible – bless her heart.

Tuesday I managed to walk up and down the hall on my own 2-3 times and enjoyed many wonderful and uplifting visits from friends, family & pastors starting about 7 AM and until sending Jo & Abbi home about 9:00.

Tuesday night I fell asleep about 11:00 and slept like a baby till about 5:30, not even waking fully for each check by the nurses.

Today I feel even better than yesterday, writing this standing beside my bed Wednesday morning about 9:00 and hope to be home this evening … if everything ‘goes’ well.

The message below to my kids & wife was written at 1:00 AM, Monday, January 23, 2006 … about 6.5 hours before surgery to remove my cancerous prostate.

At that time I was truly frightened and not sure at all I’d see my kids again. Looking back on that time is a lot easier than looking forward was.

The point was not being optimistic vs pessimistic. Neither was it about predicting or expecting the worst. It was all about facing a moment and accepting that the worst could happen and I might not see my kids or my wife again after this final goodbye.

And yet, this moment was complicated by the fact that I didn’t want to frighten them prior to the surgery.

Listening to Darden Smith, Field of Crows
Loving the feeling that music brings
Wondering what tomorrow brings
Frightened
Wishing I’d said so much more

Ben, Conner & Abbi,

Celebrate what yesterday gave … eagerly seek what tomorrow offers.
I hope I didn’t asked too much of you.
I hope I asked enough.
Always … always … always be true.
Practice what you know.
Trust your hunger to know more.
Let others teach you.
Never give up.
Always treasure your gifts.
Love others, as you would have them love you.
Listen to your mother, and grasp for all she offers.
Trust your heart.
Practice listening & watching for God.
Life is hard … and will never be fair.
Savor the Sweet … and the Bitter.
Was Gonna, Could’ve, Should’ve … are not thoughts that count.
Master learning … and practice it the rest of your life.