Conservatives deal with facts and reach conclusions; liberals have conclusions and sell them as facts.

Strange visitor from another planet *UPDATED*

I should have realized it, because the signs were all there. There was, of course, this picture:

Others understood it too:

His identity couldn’t be more clear:

Yes, it’s Superman, strange visitor from another planet, with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men! Superman, who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper, fights a never-ending battle for truth, justice and the American way!

All you had to do was substitute “Barack Obama, mild-mannered Senator…” and there you had it. But could it really be true? Well, sort of.

But is he Superman? Well, again, sort of. As any fan of Superman knows, Superman has a doppelgänger on that strange planet known as Bizarro World:

In the Bizarro world of “Htrae” (“Earth” spelled backwards), society is ruled by the Bizarro Code which states “Us do opposite of all Earthly things! Us hate beauty! Us love ugliness! Is big crime to make anything perfect on Bizarro World!”. In one episode, for example, a salesman is doing a brisk trade selling Bizarro bonds: “Guaranteed to lose money for you”. Later, the mayor appoints Bizarro No. 1 to investigate a crime, “Because you are stupider than the entire Bizarro police force put together”. This is intended and taken as a great compliment.

Our alien president, rather than being a superhero disguised as a mild-mannered something or other, out to promote truth, justice and the American Way, is instead the doppelgänger from Bizarro World. In the American version of Bizarro World, our friends (England, Israel, etc.) are our enemies. Our active enemies and those countries that are merely passively hostile to us (North Korea, Iran, Castro, Venezuela, etc.) are the ones to whom we pay homage. Our cooling planet is a warming planet. The UN, one of the most corrupt organizations in the world, is the world’s only hope for peace. The way to cure the nation’s vast deficit is to incur more debt. Disarmament protects us. The only democratic nation in the Middle East is a Nazi country. Putting women in hijabs frees them. These are the values Bizarro World Superman/Obama has brought to us.

In other words, the world according to this alien being is a Bizarro World in which all principles, values and common sense are reversed. And just so you know this is absolutely true, I have it on good authority that the President’s real name, his Bizarro World name, is Amabo Niessuh Kcarab.

(Notice: To those of you who are liberals, please do not use this as an example that conservatives are crazy and probably want to get rid of fluoride in the water too. This is satire.)