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Whoever thinks that “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” has probably never been to Paris. Or if they have, they’re eating the wrong things. I realize that many of you are probably in a post-Halloween sugar crash stupor. But even if you have vowed never to eat sugar again, you should probably reconsider if you happen to go to Paris.

Here are five of my personal favorite ways to not lose weight in Paris (disclaimer: we’re not talking about high-end foodie choices here, but rather guilty pleasure crowd-pleasing goodness):

Macarons

I know, I know, every town in America now has a bakery that thinks they know how to make macarons. But they can’t. And I’m not saying that to be mean. The fact is, most macarons in Paris are not too great either. If you want to know what a good macaron tastes like, go to Pierre Hermé (those are some Pierre Hermé macarons pics I took in our apartment before devouring them). The flavors change with the season, but my favorite is probably “Mogador” (milk chocolate and passion fruit). You can also always rely on Ladurée (you can also rely on it always having a long line), and Jean-Paul Hévin is always a good choice for chocolate.

Religieuses

A religieuse is my favorite pastry. This may not be to most trendy pastry (éclairs—the slightly less messy cousin to the religieuse— are enjoying an upswing in popularity), but nothing beats the ritual of decapitating the pastry and popping that creme-filled top in your mouth. Pictured above is the perfectly respectable Ladurée chocolate religieuse. In the summer they have a strawberry one that’s very good. My favorite (although much less photogenic) is Carl Marletti‘s. Le Figaro ranks Marletti third on their best religieuse list, behind Rollet Pradier, and Rouiller, so feel free to do your own comparison and tell me if I’m wrong to prefer Marletti.

Chocolates!

I like chocolate, and not always the ones I’m supposed to like. At Patrick Roger, the “Valparaiso” chocolate is filled with an amazing burst of lime, and “Tenderness” has a perfectly roasted and caramelized hazelnut center. I’m not in love with La Maison du chocolat. Richart, on the other hand, always tempts me—especially the spiced collection. In some alternate reality where I have money to burn, the $850 burlwood vault of chocolate would be my equivalent of a box of cuban cigars. For chocolate bars, I like Michel Cluizel‘s collection. If you’re a foodie (I’m more “Chowhound” than foodie; more gourmand than gourmet), you can probably list Italian chocolates that I should prefer and are probably already questioning my taste, so I may as well really shock you and say that I LOVE the Belgian Côte d’Or chocolate bars they sell at most supermarkets. In particular, the salted caramelized pecan milk chocolate (Did he say “milk chocolate”??? Shock! Horror!) bars. It’s kind of a nostalgia thing from when I lived in Belgium.

Crêpes

A good old street crêpe with Nutella, sliced banana, coconut (and a splash of Grand Marinier if you’re feeling extra decadent). You can make them at home, but make sure you get that really good powdered kind, not the long, sweet stringy kind used in German Chocolate cake recipes.

I know it’s not French but…Gelato

Amorino stores are everywhere. Grom is better, and in Italy I’m sure it gets better still. Due to proximity, I get Amorino. I like it way more than the overrated French Berthillon.Amorino is fairly low-brow, but it’s a far cry from a McFlurry.

To celebrate the launch of What The French?!, we have Free Paris Hi-Res (1920X1200) desktop wallpapers just for you, exclusives of whatthefrench.com from Marc Olivier (that’s me). Normally, you can find my work at various retailers (and on art.com), but here are seven wallpapers that you won’t find anywhere else. You can download them free here or from my photo site. If you want to thank us, please tell your friends about our beginning and intermediate French grammar book on iTunes.