Well, yeah, it should be basic expectations for a man to also pleasure the woman, but in addition to the basic expectation (which some unfortunately don’t care about), but for some the amount they get off on their partner getting off is above and beyond the enjoyment an average person gets from that act, which makes it a kink or fetish instead of what is ‘normal’. At least, that’s how the circles I run in use the terms.

For instance, many people enjoy having their scalp rubbed and find it pleasant, but for some, the sensation is almost orgasmic and practically leaves them panting, so for them, I’d term it a kink or a fetish. With a lot of acts/sexual things there can be a vanilla way to do/experience them and a way to do/experience them that’s more kinky or fetishistic.

That’s what I was trying to say for Joe, that I think he takes the enjoyment of pleasuring women to that level, which could explain his popularity.