Monday, June 30, 2008

Sometimes you see a story in the Times and you just wonder at how stupid people must be. In this installment, Sergeant Bill shows up - claims he's a federal officer - and proceeds to lead the police on a long series of illegal search and seizures all across a rural Missouri town... for months... before anyone bothers to check to see if the guy is for real.

I'm sorry - but that's GOT to be criminal negligence. Those cops all need to be in jail. Then again - they arrested some 'bad guys' and helped change Gerald from the 'meth capital of the United States' (according to the mayor) to something lesser (a Meth Suburb perhaps).

You waited for them to punt... for them to disappoint and somehow blow it. IMO - they were the best team in the tournament (Group D was obviously underrated when it came to the Group of Death - as both D teams beat their C opponents in the knockout). Oh sure, the Italy match had some buildup as the other 3 heavies had fallen - but they eeked out the win (and just as some others, Italy didnt play well enough this tournament to justify survival). After that - they were the best team against Russia by far - but all that just created the opportunity for another massive Spanish international letdown. A stable all-around German team barged and pushed its way into the finals playing the kind of football I hate and faced off with the Spanish - a team so renown for it's disappointments that Garret Southgate would be lost in the sea of miserable Spanish footballing souls... but yesterday they WANTED it. The beautiful ball control, the one touch passing, the side to side action breaking the german defense leading to a number of quality chances - this was the team that deserved to win.37 degrees in the sun, surrounded by Spanish expats singing and screaming, drinking too much Guinness, this is the right way to burn a Sunday afternoon. The only disappointment to be had from this tournament is that it's over.

At least there are some places where the downward spiral that is america can be viewed with some humor. Eddy is a hero - the stories are solid and, if it's some sort of viral bullshit (which i doubt) it would still be pretty damned good. The craigslist walker story is right up there in the 'hope for humanity' dept (and he's not even 1/4 zent). Goes to show that even as we, collectively, pull an easter island on the planet we can still find solace in an occasional turn of phrase (or green haired fanged girl). Of course, it could always be worse...

then again... when it comes to schadenfreude and finding humor in an otherwise nightmarish situation it's getting hard to top Olbermann

My first thought, of course, was 'he asked for a car, he got a computer. How's that for being born under a bad sign?' but the more i thought about this (and that recurring dream i had again last night where i saw myself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me) the more i think it needs greater consideration. What he did was wrong, wrong in a 'Kent - stop touching yourself' sort of way - yes - but 38 years for a school kid making a criminal mistake is probably a stretch - even taking into consideration that I think it's safe to assume that ALL grades from students from this HS must be considered suspect, that it would be terribly unfair to grant college admittance or scholarships based on such a suspect environment, and that a lot of innocent people are going to suffer their whole lives because of what he did. In that way what this kid did crossed a really really awful line.

But blaming ONLY the kid for this is pathetic. No, "I blame society. Society made me what I am" doesnt hold up either. But the unspoken reality here is that teachers and school administrators, by and large, are FUCKING MORONS who are doing the job because they cant cut it in the real world. They're sloppy and could give 2 shits about what goes on in their classroom so long as they get paid. Oh sure, there are exceptions, but as far as generalizations go it's a better one than Republicans are Assholes. Ask Michelle Rhee about the quality of American educators sometime... I bet she'll tell you a story or three (or 24 or 22).

Hey Mr Principal - if a kid breaks into your network and fixes his grades the first person that should be dealt with harshly is you.

Ed Rooney: I've got it right here in front of me. He has missed nine days...[His computer screen begins counting down from nine to two. Ferris is at home looking at the same screen]

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

As you read this remember that some people say that John McCain is a pedophile, he might have Alzheimers... or that his whole PoW story is a lie to coverup 4 years performing as a masked mexican wrestler in a series hardcore gay porn films. Wish the media actually reported some of the real stories sometime... sigh

Some days are like this i suppose... you get a movie that looks bad, you watch it, you wonder why you didnt start drinking before hand... The Machine Girl is a poignant lovestory between a high school basketball star and the mother of her brother's best friend. Not since Yo Yo Girl has Japanese cinema churned out such quality - and if Quentin Tarantino didnt have something to do with it he should've. It's Jane Eyre meets Grindhouse... only without the Jane Eyre and more blood. Oddly enough, the drill bra scene was the only one to make we wince (not even the fried tempura arm is as gruesome).Yes - if I'm going to be forced to sit through over the top japanese cinema, I'd still rather watch Kamikaze Girls but, I suppose, if I'd had more beer at the start I might have a different opinion.

Military police at Bagram had guidelines, Army Regulation 190-47, telling them they couldn't chain prisoners to doors or to the ceiling. They also had Army Regulation 190-8, which said humiliating detainees wasn't allowed.

But neither was applicable at Bagram, Bovarnick said.

The military-police rule book saying that enemy prisoners of war should be treated humanely didn't apply, he said, because the detainees weren't prisoners of war, according to the Bush administration's decision to withhold Geneva Conventions protections from suspected Taliban and al-Qaida detainees.

See - the problem is - we've been torturing people since this whole war on terra started. Americans are dicks - and unless some other American is there to tell the assholes to stop being a dick then they compete to see how big a dick they can be. Under normal circumstances there are more than enough reasonable people to restrain them - but the election of W was pretty much putting Biff in charge, and, well, it's all gone downhill from there.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Announcer for Czech v Turkey: 'hearts are pounding... nerves are being shredded!!!!'

2135: GOAL Turkey 2-2 Czech RepublicYou will not believe it. Petr Cech produces the goalkeeping howler of the tournament, spilling Hamit Altintop's cross in the most un-Petr Cech-like fashion and Nihat is on hand to tap into an empty net. This tournament. This remarkable tournament.

"how remarkable is that... of all the goalkeepers in the world, you would never have thought it would happen to one of THE very best..."

2137: GOAL Turkey 3-2 Czech RepublicOne of the most remarkable finishes to a game you will ever see. Nihat looks miles offside but he's not, the Czechs have got it all wrong and he finishes in the most amazing way, crashing a brilliant right-foot curler in off the underside of the crossbar from 22 yards to give poor, poor Petr Cech no chance whatsoever. I just don't believe this.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Ok - this one is Warren's fault.

A couple days ago: "Over a six-hour period this morning, high-powered radars in the Arctic Circle broadcast an advertisement into space for the first time.

The advertisement, for Doritos tortilla chips, was being directed towards a solar system in the Ursa Major constellation, just 42 light years from Earth. The solar system contains a habitable zone, and could host an Earth-like planet and extraterrestrial life."

Ok - so Warren's take is basically we're asking for it - and i tend to agree... remember the scene in Contact when they bust their asses to figure out what the hell this signal is - and they end up with a hitler speech? Yeah... doritos, hitler, either way - if that doesnt sic a Klendathu planet-killer on us i dont know what will.

47 years to get there - 47 years for a response - so right around 2100 expect something on the order of "SURRENDER YOUR NACHO CHEESE AND COOL RANCH OR WE SHALL TAKE OUT NORAD AND EXECUTE PAMELA ANDERSON!"

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

So I'm reading commentary on White Chapel (a Warren place) on the subject of Singularity vs Global Warming... of how the tech develops, where it moves quickly, where it will happen regardless of how badly we murder the planet, etc... good thinking going on in this thread... but one post kinda hits it.

Now - prior to this on the page we get the beautifully phrased "And that's what interests me, and what I'm trying to get people to think and talk about, not Whuffie and having separate Twitter accounts for your prefrontal lobe and your lizard brain and cosplay dorks running around turning themselves into giant anthropomorphic squirrels and humping each other in a sad little augmented reality that looks like a cross between the forest of Arden and the first fucking level of Super Mario Brothers." - I swear - THIS is why I love SF people... This is why i've been tearing through the Stross and Watts libraries like there's no tomorrow... (i'm on Iron Sunrise right now)

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Say you took a gallon of wastewater from washing out a chickencoop (pretty well guaranteed to be laden with salmonella) and sprayed it onto a valuable vegetable crop near the time of harvest - tomatoes would've been a good one - something used cold (onions, lettuce, etc) - and then went to etrade and lined up every cent you had on chicago tomato price futures leveraged at a 16:1 margin (like the hedgefunds do)...

Monday, June 09, 2008

Ok look... 'knife control' is just a bad idea. People use knives for things other than attacking people. They use big trucks for more than mowing down pedestrians too... I mean - how about you instead thank god that it was ONLY a knife, that he didn't have a couple glocks with 20 round magazines - that's how it would go down in Blacksburg, VA. Or consider that at least one of those attacked was a police officer - ie - there were public safety people right there - getting into it - trying to get control of the situation. Really - you cant stop the crazy people... dont let one nutter freak everyone out - please - dont become cowards like America has become. Instead, show the world how to respond to something like this - and dare the fuckers to do it again.

Last week, when Sen. Barack Obama (D-IL) secured enough delegates to clinch the Democratic nomination, he and his wife Michelle exchanged a fist pound greeting before he gave his speech. Teasing an upcoming “body language expert” segment on Friday, Fox News host E.D. Hill referred to the exchange as a possible “terrorist fist jab“:

Friday, June 06, 2008

Following up on my post a couple days ago - via Juan Cole this morning...

"The US is holding hostage some $50bn (£25bn) of Iraq's money in the Federal Reserve Bank of New York to pressure the Iraqi government into signing an agreement seen by many Iraqis as prolonging the US occupation indefinitely, according to information leaked to The Independent....The threat by the American side underlines the personal commitment of President George Bush to pushing the new pact through by 31 July. Although it is in reality a treaty between Iraq and the US, Mr Bush is describing it as an alliance so he does not have to submit it for approval to the US Senate."

Thursday, June 05, 2008

"A secret deal being negotiated in Baghdad would perpetuate the American military occupation of Iraq indefinitely, regardless of the outcome of the US presidential election in November."

You know, between this and Rice's big push for a mideast peace deal before the end of W's term, I'd have to consider this as active sabotage of the next administration. We've seen this all before - but damn if this isnt kicking the anthill. Hey Joe - you wanna see Israel safe and secure - this isnt gonna help (not unless you're buddy McCain gets elected and he just flat out kills everyone else within 1000 miles of Tel Aviv). I swear - the stupid in this country is just getting worse.