But when another man tries to stand in her way of happiness, Stella pushes the envelope,risking far more than she thought possible in an attempt to keep the man she truly loves in her life forever.View table of contents...

Chapters:

My dreams are filled with haunting images; killing, blood,
vengeance, rape, and terror. I eventually kick myself awake and
feel a sticky sheet of sweat slicked against my body. I clap my
hands to turn on my bedroom light and kick my feet off the bed.
I go to my bedroom window and unclasp the lock. A cool breeze
kisses my face in greeting and I take a deep breath to calm my
wavering nerves.

I can't say that I'm not used to nightmares. A good majority
life has been a nightmare, after all. But last night
they were worse than they've ever been before. And deep down I
know why. It's been almost a month since I last visited Hell.
My minions are missing me, wondering where I've gone, where
Stephan has gone….

My stomach tightens in the realization that I am gradually being
pulled to Hell. I hate going there, but after a while, I am
always drawn back down. It must be the demon in me because right
now, the pull is worse than ever before.

I mindlessly bite my lip and sit on my window sill, thinking of
ways to push back (or entirely avoid) my next trip to
Hell. My minions will want to know where Stephan has been. But
if I tell them he was killed they'll never stop seeking
retribution for his death.

My door creaks open from the far side of my room, and when I look
up I see the heels of feet leaving my bedroom. Jeremy was in my
room?

I clear my throat and lean over to the side. "Ah…. Jeremy?" I
call out tentatively.

I see Jeremy's golden blonde curls bouncing as he walks back into
my room. Oh Heaven have mercy… Jeremy stands before me
with nothing more than a low riding pair of white boxers to cover
his skin. I gulp down a nervous mouthful of saliva and stare
bashfully at his lean and muscular torso.

"W-w-what were you doing in here?" I stammer finally.

Jeremy shrugs and gazes at me from across the room. His blue
eyes are nearly translucent in the moonlight and from this far
away, it's easy to see that he's much more than a mere human.

"I heard you crying," Jeremy says, his voice divulging the degree
of concern his face fails to show. "I came in to see if you were
OK. You were thrashing around in your bed and when I got closer
to you, I knew it was your demon who was taunting you in your
sleep. So I said a prayer for you. That's when you started to
wake up and I decided it was best if I left. I'm sorry if I
disturbed your slumber."

I can feel the last remnants of sweat absorbing into my tank top.
I glance at the clock and see that it's only a quarter past
three. The blankets and pillows on my bed are all askew, visual
proof of my troubled sleep.

"You didn't disturb me," I say, forcing myself to focus on
Jeremy's face. "But - I am glad you're here. I wanted to let
you know I spoke with Evan tonight, just before I went to bed.
He'll be joining us for dinner tomorrow."

I look away as I finish the sentence, not wanting to see his
reaction. I don't know why I'm still intimidated of him. But I
am. And the last thing I need right now is for Jeremy to pick a
fight with me. As it is, I'm having a hard time keeping my demon
tethered down. All it will take is a few offensive words from
Jeremy's end and my demon will be on the loose.

A few beats of silence travel through the room and my body is
tense with anticipation. I can hear Jeremy walking toward me,
his scent growing stronger with every step he takes. He still
smells of heaven - wildflowers, daises, grass and nature. But he
smells less of heaven now than he did the first time I met him.
The scent that makes him stand apart from others -mint - is the
stronger scent I smell. It's as if the longer he's on earth, the
less he smells of heaven and the more he smells like the
human version of himself.

"Stella, I don't want him coming over here," Jeremy says.

His voice is calm and soft. I think he can tell I'm at my wits
end, because under different circumstances, he'd be talking down
to me like a child. Just the thought of him scolding me, yelling
at me and making me feel unworthy of another man's affection gets
my heart beating into a wild frenzy. My demon squawks and gets
her daggers out, all of them pointed at the angel's heart. My
eyes begin to swirl, their beautiful brown transforming to a
sparkly, eerie black.

No, no, no. Please don't do this now. Not in front of the
angel, I plead to my demon. Even after all this time, I
still have to stoop to begging and pleading to get my way with
her.

I sneak a look at Jeremy and see he is staring back at me, wonder
and worry streaking across his face.

"Please understand Stella, I'm not here to hurt you. I'm only
here to fulfill my duty. I don't pick my assignments, they're
given to me. You can have any other guy Stella. Any. Just not
Evan," Jeremy says and lowers his eyes in sadness.

It's the first time the angel has seemed semi-remorseful for the
pain he's caused me. But what Jeremy doesn't understand is that
without Evan, I have no one. It's hard for me to find people who
understand me, who appreciate the human side I have to offer.
Evan is special, so understanding and so kind. Well of
course he is. He's a soon-to-be angelic warrior for Christ's
sake. And that's why I can't have him. I'm just not good
enough.

I move away from the window sill and slip my body back into bed
feeling exhausted and defeated. "I'm done arguing about his for
the night," I say to Jeremy.

Hot tears prick the corners of my eyes and begin to cascade down
my cheeks. I don't know why I'm being so emotional. I've been
living long enough that I should be able to hold onto my tears
until I am left alone. And yet the tears continue to fall, their
steady stream like that of a leaky faucet.

Jeremy walks over to my bed, kneeling down on the carpeted floor
and leaning his body closer to mine. My stomach flutters when
his warm breath treks over my face. I look up to see he is only
mere inches away from me. What the hell is he doing?

"You should spit in that bastard's eye," my demon barks
at me. Yes, I really should. He killed my husband and is now
preventing me from being with the man that has made me happier
than I've been in decades.

And yet…

All I really want him to do is climb in bed with me, to hold
me and stroke my hair until I fall asleep.

"No, you're fine," my unsteady voice responds. "But like I said,
I'm not arguing about this tonight. Evan is coming tomorrow
whether you like it or not. Got it?"

Jeremy gives me a faint smile and his cheeks redden to a deep
shade of scarlet. He reaches out tentatively, bringing his hand
up and lightly stroking his knuckles down my cheek. My tears
immediately absorb into his soft, warm skin. The touch is so
sensual and so soft that I become frozen in place. I'm too
scared to move, too scared to breath. Jeremy looks at me with
his deep blue eyes, his gaze searching for something I can't
quite possibly fathom.

With a clear of his throat, Jeremy moves his hand back to his
side and pushes his body away from my bed. He shuffles his feet
across the floor and pauses just before he leaves my room.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Stella," Jeremy says, flicking off my
light switch. "Please know that you cannot continue to see Evan.
But I will allow it just this once. I….I look forward to
meeting him."

And then he closes my door, leaving no room for a response or a
rebuttal from my end. My stomach is in knots and my brain feels
muddled with everything that has happened in the last twenty-four
hours. I am completely drained. And confused. I close my eyes
and take a deep breath, refusing to acknowledge that I just got
my way (for the first time!) against the angel, refusing
to acknowledge that he tried to console me when I cried, and -
worst of all - refusing to acknowledge that somewhere deep inside
me…I think I liked it.