It’s like the fire that was lit within
Has dwindled,
Withered,
Faded to oblivion.
Leaving but a trace of who I was
Scattered across photos
My writings,
My loves.
I do not wish to pursue anything
No longer dream of a world
With all of us,
Together,
Peacefully living.
With no worries,
Just time,
Just a place to feel free.
I believed it were possible
If we made it a habit on our knees.
And all would be forgiven
And you’d live to see me succeed.
But for once I feel nothing
And truly feel lost.
Like I had to pay for my security
And you were the cost.
Been so long since a passing
Had hit so close to home.
And the memories keep replaying
Though my heart has grown cold.
Is it normal to feel angry?
Is it normal to feel alone?
Is it normal to blame Him
Even though you chose to go?
Grieving seems unhealthy
When they expect you to be strong.
But how can I hold this family up
If I can’t find the strength to move on?