With three simple words, they’ll disarm their detractors, pour oil on troubled waters. They’ll help to reunify a culture by admitting that sometimes their ideological opponents are correct.

Just kidding. Don’t hold your breath waiting for mea culpas from Cory Booker, Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi and Kamala Harris, or (throwback time!) Al Sharpton, who opined that if Donald Trump simply remained silent on the Smollett matter, it would be sinister. The formerly successful actress Ellen Page blamed the nonexistent assault on … Mike Pence.

People said to be super-smart, and also Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, fell all over themselves to announce that they not only believed the woke 21st-century version of a 1980s abducted-by-aliens story but that they were in anguish about it. And they were not only in anguish but had detected an urgent sociological message about the nefariousness of the hateful right in America today.

Just to grease their path as they were skiing off the cliff, Trump pulled off one of his subtlest trolls yet when he publicly agreed with them, so they couldn’t accuse him of being insensitive. As an old military saying goes, never interfere with an enemy while he’s in the process of destroying himself.

Ariana Grande tweeted, “what happened to jussie makes me really f—ing sick to my stomach. i can’t believe s–t like this is really still happening everyday.” Yeah, I couldn’t believe it either, so I didn’t. GQ writer Joshua Rivera, in a piece blaming “late-stage whiteness,” came up with this unforgettable description of the supposed attack: “While its veracity isn’t confirmed, its sentiment needs no fact-check.”

“I stand with you @JussieSmollett. We all do. This is America. Unfortunately,” said actress and writer Lena Waithe on Instagram. Fortunately not, I guess. Writer Roxane Gay tweeted, “I am so sorry to hear what happened to @JussieSmollett,” adding that she was “committed to holding this administration and its ilk accountable for this hothouse of hate being fostered.”

Oscar-winning “Moonlight” director Barry Jenkins tweeted, “Thinking of Jussie. Saddened. Heartbroken. Angry. ALL of it…this is F***ED. This what all that hateful mongering has wrought. Are you PROUD???” The question might today be turned back on him: How proud are you feeling of Smollett? How ashamed do you feel of yourself now?

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“I was wrong” solves so much, but this week the apologies will be few and grudging, if there are any at all. Some progressive hysterics — the progsterics — will quietly delete their outraged tweets (as activist Shaun King has already done). Some will simply stew silently.

Most will use the latest #NarrativeFail to find some other reason for bashing President Trump, Vice President Pence, their supporters, the Republican Party and anyone declared guilty of “gloating” after being proven correct to doubt Smollett’s ridiculous made-for-television story.

Progsterics who made the previously little-known actor the most talked-about TV performer in America for the last three weeks will denounce conservatives for not shutting up about the whole affair. Smollett won’t apologize either. Nor will he suffer much in the way of repercussions, because he “started a conversation,” meaning he smeared the right people.

Denzel Washington, in a 2016 speech, had some wise words about media practices. “In our society, now it’s just first — who cares, get it out there. We don’t care who it hurts. We don’t care who we destroy. We don’t care if it’s true. Just say it, sell it. Anything you practice you’ll get good at — including BS.”

Given how social media has become a publishing platform for anyone famous enough to attract an audience, actors and activists have become a huge new source of progsteria.

These loudmouths and lamebrains have no editors, no oversight and no standards. They live in their fantasies. So it’s hardly surprising that they’re among the biggest spreaders of fake news.