7]i had no idea KDMHMD forum band hogayi ...sorry to hear that well nice move that you shifted it to fanfiction section...thanks for doing soKdmhmd forum band hone wala tha but not now humari (deshians) ki meherbani se

8]awesome write up dear...magar it was short hence i was not able to analyse the continuity ...the technicality...and the quality conformation of the FF...

9]magar i liked this chapter a lot!! short but sweetthank u so much

10] thank you for giving me a chance to review the FF dear and keep my views in front of youwell its was my pleasure

kiran_28IF-Sizzlerz

1]The pic is so cute!! nice place dearthank u this place in Shillong and i have already went there....i remember 26th/29th march 2009 episode jab prem was crying sitting on a small brifge like this thinking heer loved only his face not him...

2]"There are many couples sitting on benches, under the tree or near the lake" nice touch of detailing dear maintains the believable aspect of the FF...gives a solid scenario...nice thinkingactually in reality ward lake is one of the lover's Point in shillong

3]"Heer is busy in chatting with Ash and Misha. And our Prem is continuously trying to get Heer's attention. But Heer is not looking at him even for one second." i can imagine prem trying to catch Heer's attention!! remember his and heer's mehendi?? the broken mirror ...and i like the way you said "our" prem....makes this FF a tad more personal.. brings the reader the narrator and the characters of teh story much more close..thanks for thinking in that waywell its my point of view

6]i can imagine heer nervously smiling and hesitating a lot to accept the invitation and pinning all her hope on prem to SAVE her...and did prem looked like this? ya ryt

7]"Heer slowly stretch her hand to keep her palm on Manmeet's palm but before she could put her palm on Manmeet's she was stopped by Prem's scream" very very DRAMATIC!!!

i could imagine..heer's hand slowwwly inching towards manmeet's outstretched hands...then the video panning and focussing on manmeet's hand ...heer's hand...heer's face..prem's face...then heer's hand...prem's face...then heer's face...she swallowing down..in hesitaion...then again prem's face..heer's hand...then a fast play of all the three subjects "with zuzuk zuzuk BG sound* then suddenly Prem bucling up ...bending forward screaming!! then heer's shocked face manmeet's face now turns towards prem...and a still on every one's shocked face one by one as they watch prem screaming in pain... hmm i know it was bit dramatic na...kuch zyada hi hogaya tha

8]"Prem (screamed):- aaahhhahahaaa!!!!" but seriously i was so immersed in FF that i was shocked a bit...how dare you keep prem in pain even though jhoot moot ka...opps sry but kya karen kuch pane k liye kuch khona bhi to pardta hai na

but nice thinking...although age old idea to draw attention of his sajni and escaping from the annoying people and kabaab emin haddi manmeet

9]i was expecting manmeet will be sucpicious cos of the TIMING of his pain...can't prem build up his drama?? sort of leading to pain...so that no one could be suspicious?? anaari hey bilkul anaari ab kya karein iss jhalle ka??

10]i can see where prem is coming from...from his pOV he is in danger of losing heer anytime...cos of not saying truth out...and personally i dint like the behaviour of chipku-manmeet...arey kunal, thick friend of P and H din't take any liason with heer till now...but here manmeet is going on like a breakless gaadihahahaha

11] waiting for your "Big Dhamaaka"...hmm just wait and watch

12]awesome write up!! nice hold on story even though you had discontinued for some time..in between...nice continuity is maintained through out...nice scene build up...location was used wisely!! the reactions of various characters where well drawn out...specially the car mein ice cream wala scene ,prem's nautanki etc!!thank u so much

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