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Michael Cera, who normally looks like a middle-aged lesbian high school English teacher with the third largest stamp collection in Northampton, MA, got a Guido makeover courtesy of Jersey Shore's Pauly D!

Unfortunately, Michael doesn't look like something you'd find rolling out of Karma Club at 4am. Michael looks more like a middle-aged lesbian high school English teacher with the third largest stamp collection in Northampton, MA who tried to be a hybrid of Jon & Kate for Halloween but failed miserably.

Michael Cera, who normally looks like a middle-aged lesbian high school English teacher with the third largest stamp collection in Northampton, MA.

LOL !!! That's quite an accurate description indeed.

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

omg... living for that beau-hunk Keith guy that Snooki's with on tonight's episode.

Is that the redneck guy? I believe he said he was a farmer, man I never figured them as your type Phyllicia. Tonight's show was a good one though. Ronnie obviously has a mean left hook, I thought he killed that guy he knocked out tonight. What about sister stalker that Pauly picked up? I liked the little haterade recipe The Situation came up with for the lame guy Vinny.

In case anyone missed it here's the recipe :

parmesean cheese milk pickle juice

Mix the ingredients in a bowl and place under the haters bed. They will know it's there within a few days.

Tonight had two episodes and I only saw the second one because I was watching the season premiere of Project runGay on Lifetime, and I think Snickers met Keith in the first episode. Keith only showed up briefly in the 2nd one, but he was perfectly proportioned and a keeper in the face from what I saw. I'd never discriminate against a patriotic redneck, and I definitely sensed that he was not a real guido as he'd didn't have spiked hair or a tanning salon effect.

LOL @ this intro:"Come on, bro. The idea to create The Complex Jersey Shore Soundboard was as easy as Snooki after two Jšger shots."

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

They don't have caller ID on them though, hence why Vinny got stuck on the phone with Paulie's stalker chick. This might create problems for a playa like you when a grenade calls.

I bet you can buy some contraption at Radio Shack to solve this. I just dug out this ancient black rotary phone that dates from the late 1940's or so, and that I had totally re-wired when I was in college in the late 80's, and it still works so I plugged it into my new Comcast phone/modem that I got today, but yeah I can't see caller ID. Still, I bet there's even some software floating around that I could get to work in that regards, so I'll research it.

"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Snooki said she was hiring a bodyguard to keep fans at bay. The 22-year-old "Princess of Poughkeepsie" explained, "When we try to go to TGI Friday's or Applebee's, we can't eat because people go crazy."

I know Snooki was lacking a bit in the common sense department, but she really amazed me after Ronnie got put in the slammer for knocking that guy out. As Sammi was distrauntly heading upstairs to sleep alone Snooki tried to assist by asking , "Should I call 911?". So I gathered that Snooki is under the impression that you can call 911 to get someone bailed out... kinda of funny.

"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

And here I thought that we had with Sammi was forevah. I thought they would kiss and make-up shortly after their tiff on the reunion show.

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

I read in the paper today that MTV is trying to get them to do a second season at $10,000 a piece for each of them per episode, but some of the cast want more.

MTV needs to pay them more than that. This is their first show in a good while to get as much attention (and actual viewers). They have exploited kids for a zillion seasons of "Road Rules," "The Real World," and every other cheaply produced reality show that they have broadcasted.

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

The New York Post today stated that MTV was getting fed up with the cast demanding more and more money and they might just replace them all, and that they had sent out employees to bars up and down the Shore looking for new cast members.

As much as I loved many of the cast members, it's not going to be all that difficult to find tons of replacements. They're everywhere in the northeast. Hell, you could probably recruit them all in five minutes by just going to Staten Island.

I read in the paper today that MTV is trying to get them to do a second season at $10,000 a piece for each of them per episode, but some of the cast want more.

My wife was telling me about this earlier. She said it was DJ Paulie (lol) and The Situation who were holding out for more money. IMO they should hold out. My wife watches some other MTV reality show, I think the Hills, and they make quite a bit more evidentally. I think they should pay them more, the show was ranked high in the ratings. MTV says they are sticking to the $10,000 offer and if they have to, will replace the cast members who are holding out.

"The Real World," and every other cheaply produced reality show that they have broadcasted.

Careful...easy now, that's only been one of my favorite shows for the last 16 years. I really like the challenges to be honest. I like seeing people I remember from when I was younger showing the same crows feet I have.

Careful...easy now, that's only been one of my favorite shows for the last 16 years. I really like the challenges to be honest. I like seeing people I remember from when I was younger showing the same crows feet I have.

I love the challenges just as much. By "cheaply" I meant that they don't have to invest much in these productions (and many of the earlier seasons did not pay anything to their cast members; apparently being on the show was enough). I used to love TRW back in the early 90s (especially the first season with my girl Heather B. and Eric Neiss). The Miami season was dreadful though.

If they replace "The Situation" I'll be fine with the decision. Just don't take away my Ronnie or Snooki.

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

The New York Post today stated that MTV was getting fed up with the cast demanding more and more money and they might just replace them all, and that they had sent out employees to bars up and down the Shore looking for new cast members.

As much as I loved many of the cast members, it's not going to be all that difficult to find tons of replacements. They're everywhere in the northeast. Hell, you could probably recruit them all in five minutes by just going to Staten Island.

I am totally going to ramp up my training sessions at the gym so I can be on Season 2! Ronnie, I'm comin' for ya!

Did you guys miss the Joey Porsche Experience several years ago on Hot Chicks With Douchebags? That's who they should recruit.

Ewwww! That pouting ain't cute. And he is not Italian as far as I can tell...

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

Before the Shore was only 30 minutes long. Must not have been up to a whole lot I guess, not a lot of time divided amongst 8 people if you count the one who lost her housing because she didn't want to fold shirts.

I thought for "shore" they would have talked about more intersting things. Well, they were complaining about how they wanted more then the $10,000 an episode but I guess they realized they are nobodys and could not do any better. Good for MTV to stand up to them and say anymore and no deal. They all sucked it up and took it. Lets go season 2!

Evidently MTV wants to get a 2nd season filmed so that it airs this coming summer, as that would be more seasonally appropriate. But to do so they need a warm weather location to film it right now, thus ruling out the shore in NJ. Of course this is all completely stupid considering what the concept and name of the show is.