You talk about distance. I live in the US and parents are in India. The telephone is a godsend and the time difference, almost 12 hours makes for good just before bedtime phone calls. I have a photo of my parents visible to me as I walk into the bedroom so a few minute phone call is easy.
But in America, what I now call the land of no service and all self service, finding time is not easy.

9:35 am September 10, 2007

Time w/ loved ones is never enough wrote :

I give you credit for your efforts...I used to work w/ older folks and I can not emphasize enough how important the contact is w/ family members (and nothing like the sons and daughters themselves).
In the midst of our incredibly packed days, we sometimes forget how routine/paced/even slow the day can be for folks who are winding down a bit. One thing that I would suggest, which I try to do w/ moderate success, is to have a variety of brief contacts very regularly. I applaud the cab ride to get in a phone call to them (could you do this on a once-a-week sort of schedule?). I tear things out of the paper and scribble things on them that I think would be of interest(I have mailing labels and envelopes stamped just for them).
Also, the occasional school paper from one of the kids, even something from our church bulletin that makes me think of them. Brief phone calls, so that I don't feel as though I need to talk for an hour are part of my week. Sometimes I call just to say, "we're at the park and Jacob said that you'd be proud if you could see him do the monkey bars."
But I also acknowledge that living away simply does not allow us all of those quick visits, family dinners, etc. and I am still sad to think of what I and my family are missing out on.
I try to get fairly frequent visits home. Some of the best visits are around some simple activity, and not a big holiday. While I am there, I try to schedule some specific activities/visiting time w/ the folks, and try to fit in a small task or two (buying school shoes for the kids) that mom or dad might or might not want to join in. I also occasionally go by myself for a very quick trip.
Tons of friends are dealing w/ very serious issues w/ parents these days, and those who have lost a parent acknowledge how, however burdensome it can seem at the time, once they are gone, they are gone for good and then there are no more weekend trips home, evening phone conversations, etc. and you cherish those that you had.

9:37 am September 10, 2007

marc wrote :

Deal with the guilt-it's easier than actually trying to find a "window of opportunity" to visit. My Mother lives in L.Vegas alone and I'm an only child. The pressure is intense but between dogs, kids, wife, a struggling golf game I just can't really visit enough to keep her happy. I find easier to deal with the guilt.

9:37 am September 10, 2007

MBT wrote :

I squeeze in calls almost every day. Some are as short as 5 minutes, but I know how important it is to my mom to feel connected. So, yes, I am occasionally the irritating woman you see on her cell phone wandering the grocery store aisles, or waiting outside to pick up my kids from an activity while on the phone, but I have to squeeze out the time where I can find it. When we get to share some of the daily trivia of life, instead of only calling when there's big news, it keeps us close. I also try to intentionally call when I know my mom will be out to make sure I get to talk to my dad some too. Despite being 9 hours apart, my mom and I talk more than some of her sisters with kids living in town. They are alone in the city we grew up in, so as they age it is especially important to me to stay close to how they are doing. My husband is not a big phone guy, and only calls about once a month. Pre-kids, I did take on the responsibility of calling his mom more regularly as well, but now leave that to him.

9:41 am September 10, 2007

Bill Gordon L. Stafford wrote :

We are couple that is blessed with four children, we have two Daughters and two Sons, and between them, we have seven grandchildren and four great grandchildren. The closest is a Daughter who is in the Metroplex of DFW some 350 miles away. We see the families of two daughters and two sons when we visit them and occasionally on special occasions such as birthdays, weddings, Christmas etc. Our sons, daughters, their spouses, and children have given close support in health and other needs. We love them all equally. It is a busy world and no one should feel guilty about not visiting parents just feel blessed your parents are healthy and alive.

10:45 am September 10, 2007

Upstate NY Dad wrote :

Tom, I'm there w/you. My mom's in California, so the time difference makes it hard, but I try to call and when I'm not exhausted I actually do it. We haven't visited there in about 4 yrs, mostly due to my own career turmoil and associated financial impacts, and I feel bad about it. I know my mom really appreciates my calls, so I try not to have a time limit when I call.

10:54 am September 10, 2007

Just live with it wrote :

My parents are in UK, MIL is on East Coast, we're in Chicago, and my brother's in Australia. We have all adjusted our expectations of contact to meet reality. We phone my parents (I'm in the process of buying a new phone which will allow for better speakerphone experience for just this purpose), we're also planning vacations around Xmas to them (yes, it's expensive, but we're learning to deal with it - my Dad can't get health insurance due to resolved cancer, so they can't come to us), we speak to MIL over the phone, and since FIL died recently are also planning more family vacations with her (Thanksgiving she's coming to us, and Florida we're all meeting up in Feb). However, main form of communication for everyone (and the ONLY one with my brother for the last 10 years) is email. We email every day, including photos, silly little observations on what we've all done (the minutiae are what count - even my daughter's recent potty training details) and I've also started uploading little movies onto youtube. We also text message a fair amount (particularly with my sister in the UK and my Dad). But we all accept that living so far apart and all the children with little kids, and grandparents all busy with their own lives/jobs, that sometimes you miss a call, or you don't upload photos/movies for a few days/weeks, and nobody takes it personally. We still love each other.

11:05 am September 10, 2007

Anon wrote :

This is a timely post for me - for reasons I'm unsure, I've felt this pressure more acutely this summer than ever. This is even after taking a 14-day vacation with my parents this spring. I've tended to get angry with my mother, as I think she is oblivious to the amount of pressure she applies (and corresponding guilt that results), but I can't help wonder. I'm not sure anger is the right response, but I'd appreciate thoughts on how folks dipolmatically deal with constant passive-aggressive remarks about not getting "home" enough.

11:15 am September 10, 2007

Chicago wrote :

My husband frequently calls his parents while he's commuting home or running an errand. They never ever call us so he has to find the time (when he was young and before I came on the scene he waited to see how long it would take for them to call him - nine weeks). They are perfectly content only to talk to him; the kids are barely ever mentioned when he calls them.
I'm usually on the phone with my mom once a day (dad passed away seven years ago). I'm an only child of immigrants and just can't do the once a week call; I simply can't do that after all my parents did for me. Mom spends one or two weekends with us to see the kids. She always brings a home-cooked meal and cookies or something else and usually takes us out to dinner.
I am so blessed that my husband gets along very well with my mom. My husband has said many times that my parents have treated him more like a son than his own parents. My mom makes sure she never meddles or interferes with our marriage and the children and my husband has never once complained about her being such an active presence in our lives.

11:46 am September 10, 2007

Anonymous wrote :

I usually talk to my parents at least once a week or so. We live 3 hours apart and we usually visit at least once a month. My parents are retired yet they lead busy and lives, traveling, sports, concerts, etc. MY MIL is also retired and lives in the same town as us. She doesn’t drive, she has health issues and she doesn’t get out that much. Her daughter also lives in the same town, but she only seems to call her mom when she needs something (babysitting, etc.) and her mom is acutely aware of this. We make a conscious effort to have MIL over for dinner, invite her to the kids school events, etc. She really enjoys it and she is much closer to our children than she is to her other grandchildren. And it's great for the kids to have a grandparent near by.

11:49 am September 10, 2007

Anonymous wrote :

We're fortunate that my mother who lives in SFO (we're in Chicago) comes 3-4 times a year to us. She rearely stays longer than 5 days and tries to ease the juggle for us. If she didn't come out to see us I don't know how we'd ever afford to see her. My mom also calls about 2x's a week and we regularly send photos to Wallgreens for her to pick up near her house. My Dad is another story. While he only lives about 30 minutes away he never take the initiative in seeing us and if the Bears/Cubs/Sox are playing, then forget it, he "isn't available" - although I believe he really values us & his grandkids - he's just socially lame. I go between anger and pity with him. At this moment I'm in a good place with him- I make a point of inviting him to my daughter's softball games, I e-mail articles I think he'll find interesting (microwave popcorn and the link to lung cancer was a hit) and if we're having steak for dinner I'll often call last minute to see if he's available. I once suggested he come regulalry for dinner - say every Tuesday -- but he hated the idea and hurt my feelings by dismissing it. (I htink it made him feel old). So . . . now I just mirror his casualness. My husband & I believe that it is very important to honor our parents and we try hard to honor them in a way that makes sense for all of us. BTW - my MIL lives an hour away and comes every week with groceries, dinner and babysitting services - aren't you jealous?!

12:13 pm September 10, 2007

Allison wrote :

This is a timely topic! As my parents wind down their careers, they have started to think about where they'd like to settle down after retirement. Recently, they have been talking about moving back to Sullivan, Illinois, a tiny town in the middle of the state about three hours by car from the nearest major airport. While I don't have kids now, I have been trying to emphasize how much I do NOT want them to move out there. First, my grandparents lived out there when I was on the East Coast and even though I saw them twice a year, I know I never really knew them as people and vice versa. Secondly, I have no connection to that area whatsoever and have very little desire to visit on what is precious little PTO. I've warned them - by all means, move back to Illinois, but be prepared to visit us more often than not since getting there means a full day of travel each way.

12:30 pm September 10, 2007

westchestermom wrote :

We seem to be the opposite of most of the posters as we see our parents more post children. There was a lot of tension because they tried to see us weekly. Throw in acouple of aunts and uncles and we had little time for anyone else. We are fortunate that all of these visits have continued and now it permits us to go the gym, have a night out without a big fee to a babysitter etc. Our daughter loves to sepdn time with all of her grandparents and aunts. Her face lights up when she sees them. After reading these posts, I will continue to appreciate living in the same metroplitan area even though it costs a small fortune.

12:40 pm September 10, 2007

Pat in SF Bay Area wrote :

This may sound nuts, but I have a standing time I talk to my parents. Divorced, this means I have 2 times each week. But it really works great - they look forward t othe call, I look forward to the call, and it alleviates my having to worry about staying in touch.

12:47 pm September 10, 2007

Anonymous wrote :

We spent two years in Europe with my family on the West Coast and my husband's family mostly around Toronto. My tech-savvy and very literate husband created a blog to record the interesting moments in our day-to-day life as we adjusted to living in a foreign language. Both sets of parents (not to mention other family and friends) were tech-savvy enough to be able to log in and check our stories, which saved us the time we would have spent telling the same story over and over. Plus, as an added bonus, we have a wonderful record in text and pictures of the two years we spent. The blog ended up playing a very important role in my family's life last year, when my mother became very ill. My husband and I made a point of not only trying to post something interesting (preferably with a photo) every day or so, but also of trying to go out and explore the city where we lived so that we would have something interesting to share with my family as a distraction from the difficult experience they were going through. My dad sent us regular email and photos about their experiences. These tools helped a lot because the differences in time zones often made it difficult to find a time when it worked for all of us to speak by phone.

When we did talk on the phone, Skype with a camera was a great tool. My parents and my husband set up cameras so we could speak on Skype for practically free and see each other, too.

12:52 pm September 10, 2007

another Chicago wrote :

I believe that parents are a blessing (and I hope my children share this belief when they are adults) My mom lives about an hour away and I see her every other week and call her daily. She is getting close to retirement and may end up babysitting my children which would be wonderful. I grew up with both my grandmas living with us (Unfortunately, my father and both grandpas died young). I can't imagine life with out frequent contact with grandparents. I wonder about people who haven't seen their parents in 4 years, if they will be upset when their children treat them the same way.

12:54 pm September 10, 2007

SAS wrote :

My daughter and son-in-law and 2 little grandkids live in London. Live Skype computer-to-computer hook-ups have been a life-saver for us to stay in touch. My daughter has a laptop, so once we are connected via Skype, she can take her laptop and built-in camera around the flat to show me what is new in the "back garden" or to see my sleeping granddaughter Eliza in her "cot" (crib to us in the U.S.). We do this mostly on weekends with the time difference. I can see all of them on my computer screen and we talk and talk. Plus my daughter has a very inexpensive phone plan and she calls me after the kids are in bed about 3 times during the week.

12:54 pm September 10, 2007

Spawn of Kermit wrote :

Not an easy topic to address. Our kids have one surviving grandparent -- my mother in law. A sweet lady but she is homebound, suffers from multiple medical conditions and is somewhat depressed. Her kids alternate visiting her and taking her to the doctor, but she does not in or near us, which makes being there for her more difficult. Travel is problematic for her, but going to Granny's offers little enjoyment to our kids, particularly in warmer weather. Do I feel guilty? You bet, perhaps more so than my own wife does. But my biggest concern -- and this may be selfish of me -- is the poor example we are setting for our children.

12:55 pm September 10, 2007

Spawn of Kermit wrote :

Sorry -- that should read, "she does not want to move in with or near us."

1:22 pm September 10, 2007

brian wrote :

A tough challenge. my solution is calling on my mobile as I walking my dog. this does allow my mom to hear often from me, btu additional calls are reuired for catching up with the grandkids.

1:28 pm September 10, 2007

NewMom wrote :

We have started a family web page that helps us stay in contact with our extended family; it has made a big difference. For me, the hard part is face to face contact with relatives. Since my husband's parents are divorced, we have three sets of parents to visit, none of whom live close. I feel like we spend all of our vacations racing to a relative's house to make sure that no one feels neglected!

2:15 pm September 10, 2007

Anonymous wrote :

I'm very close to my mother - we talk just about every day. I have a new baby, so we talk even more. We live within 1.5 hours of each other by train. I wouldn't have it any other way.

2:24 pm September 10, 2007

Sue wrote :

I lived near my parents and they were really annoyed if I wasn't there all the time. The fact that I worked long hours didn't seem to register. My siblings weren't even expected to phone. When it came time for the retirement community, assisted living, nursing home, I was the caregiver. It was emotionally exhausting, easier after I retired but I was grateful I didn't have to have one or both of them living with me.

2:45 pm September 10, 2007

Grandpa Jim wrote :

About the time my wife wrapped up her professional career she announced that she wanted to live by the ocean, roughly 3 hours from where we were then living. While I was not enthusiastic, I did go along with it. Our son and daughter, both of whom lived near our old residence, tried very hard to dissuade her. Both made the argument that such a move would harm our grandchildren. Two years after the move my wife realized that our son and daughter had been right. We now own houses in both locations, and spend a lot of time going back and forth. On the plus side, we now seem to appreciate each other more than we did before.

2:54 pm September 10, 2007

been there done that wrote :

From the parent's perspective I can say that it is just as hard to maintain contact from my side. I try to respect the stage of life and wishes of each child. As much as I like to see or speak with my children, I also know that too much contact can be intrusive (they range in age from 25 to 33). So I let the sons take the initiative, either by phone or email, and I always reply to a message or make time to speak when they call. If I don't hear from one them for a few weeks, I'll send an email and follow up with a call. I speak with one daughter several times a week - she likes to call while walking, riding the El or doing her grocery shopping, and I feel free to call her without fear of intruding. The other daughter is busy with her life and lives far away right now, so the protocol is more like the sons, but there were years when we were very chummy and lived in the same town. No grandkids yet, so I expect the dynamic will change when that happens. I can say that the unmarried ones like to come home for a little TLC at the holidays and all of them welcome an occasional visit from me, preferably of three days or less.

3:08 pm September 10, 2007

S wrote :

Ah yes, always a tough call! Part of the issue lies in the communications styles of everyone involved. My parents and I are just not "phone people." I detest chit-chatting on the phone and so do they-- we're totally functional, social people-- but for whatever reason it's just not a form of communication either side is that into. We frequently exchange emails though, including pictures, links, and so on. My husband's family, on the other hand, looves frequent phone calls. On speakerphone. To talk about any and all minutia. It drives me crazy-- I appreciate that they are interested in our daily lives, but end up awkwardly silent as they call "just to see what we're up to" Ugh... oh well, we have a loving, warm relationship with both sides so can't really complain-- just different styles!

3:38 pm September 10, 2007

ed wrote :

marc,

I'm an only child as well. I feel much better about myself knowing that there are sons like you who put their dogs and struggling golf game ahead of their mother.

4:15 pm September 10, 2007

been there done that wrote :

To marc and ed - Children like you are the reason I had lots of kids. Less guilt for each one of them individually and the chance that at any given time at least one of them would feel like paying some attention to me. However, I also maintain a good career, hobbies and a long-term relationship of my own (no dogs though).

5:01 pm September 10, 2007

From NYC wrote :

My husband calls his mom once or twice a week. She lives 4 hours away, so visits are for Chanukah/Christmas vacation and Passover, plus any extended family gatherings. She now has health issues and the medication has rendered her reactive, not at all proactive, and her memory is going. So, it is tough to call her, even weekly, when she has literally nothing to say. My BIL and SIL do the "heavy lifting" as they live 20 minutes away.

Since college, I always called my mother once a week; sometimes my dad would get on the phone. She called her mom every day when I was a kid and cautioned me against that pattern.

We saw my folks every 4-6 weeks, especially when the kids were growing up; they lived an hour away. At least once a year, they took the kids for a weekend. They attended school plays and birthday parties.

But when my dad died 10 months ago, I began to call my mom everyday, at least once a day. We spoke about trivia and also about the changes in her life. She especially felt alone at night, and we often spoke at 10 pm.

It no longer is everyday, but we still talk 5 times a week. She seems to need me less now, having made some new contacts. Which is fine with me.

My sister and I speak once a week and my brother a bit less often. We are all comfortable with this schedule.

5:21 pm September 10, 2007

margaret wrote :

I try to call my parents frequently, probably once a week or two weeks at most each, but find it is hard for them to understand just how jam packed my schedule is, and how hard it is to talk with them as long as I'd like. Add in the time difference, and I sometimes feel like the bad guy even calling them- I have to say up front, "I'm in the car, I'm on my way to work, I'll be there in half an hour," and then start preparing them to get off the phone 5 minutes before I actually need to hang up. Also, they don't seem to understand why we don't answer the phone. It's simple- we're not home when they call- EVER! They are on the East Coast so they only ever call before their bedtime, which is before we get home, certainly M-F and often on weekends. As often as I explain this, they complain about it incessantly. I try to compensate by calling them earlier in the day on the weekend from my mobile. It is exasperating that they hold the time difference against me since I am the one that moved away from "home." Why does aging so often result in such inflexibility?

6:14 pm September 10, 2007

One of Six wrote :

My elderly parents can no longer travel. They have 6 kids all living far away, each in a different state. Coping mechanisms:
1. Apple Picture phone is great--they can see my son do his Irish dancing and also Halloween costumes, etc.
2. Each of the six of us has a designated day to call--oldest to youngest, Monday through Saturday. It really helps me remember to call.
3. All six of us never visit at once because then it is a let-down for them when we leave, not knowing when the next visit will be. So, one of us will visit roughly ever two months.
I feel for you only children--it has got to be a heavy load!

9:10 pm September 10, 2007

Lisa wrote :

It's great to hear the different perspectives from the "kids" and parents--sometimes it's easy to forget how different all our families are. We live--deliberately!!--within 15 miles of both sets of grandparents. My loud, generous and fun Italian family are in and out of our daily lives, coming over for dinner, picking up the kids at school, asking us out for pizza, even joining Sunday barbecues with our friends. I grew up with my grandparents doing the same. So I'm lucky my husband thinks he "hit the in-law jackpot" (his words). My in-laws are quieter and were a bit bewildered by my attention at first--come for dinner! have some more pasta! the kids miss you; can we drop by to pet the dogs?--especially since they were the "call mom once a week" types. But they've learned to put up with me, and I'm delighted that my kids have such great, close relationships with their grandparents (who, for all we know, tell their friends that their kids just won't leave them alone...)

9:59 pm September 10, 2007

Anon Mom of 2 wrote :

My parents are close his are another time zone and at least 6 states away.

While my parents are close, they are not comfortable at our house...cannot get a good reason why. We would see them more if they were willing to come over for more than just cake and ice cream at birthdays or Christmas dinner where they eat and run. As it is we see them about once a month and I email with my mom weekly on average. I guess it just depends what is going on. I see my parents in the same way Lisa described the inlaws.

Yes, they play the guilt card a lot and I am not a regular caller. I talk alot during the day and will email or live chat in the evening, but another phone call is hard to do.

He talks to his family about once a week. They call us as his father has some chronic health issues and they call when he is "at his best" and usually can also talk to the grandkids.

2:40 am September 11, 2007

lynn wrote :

My M-I-L lives in France and we're in S'pore. We go back to France every year in June and M-I-L comes to our place in Nov/Dec. She gets to spend time with the kids, because they're more interesting! And of course, cooking and baking for us makes her very happy. I put on 2 kgs the last time she was here! I've lost the 2 kgs but I'll have to be more careful this year. If visits are not feasible, try MSN/e-mail/cards. Get your kids to start/learn writing letters.

9:00 am September 11, 2007

Anonymous wrote :

I also have a standing, weekly phone date with my folks on the opposite coast. Knowing they're expecting the call (and would worry if it didn't come) helps me remember it, and I enjoy the conversation because, thankfully, they're still pretty busy with their own lives and have lots to discuss. (They email me a bit during the week, but I rarely have time to reply.) They do come visit once a year, and so far I've been able to see them once a year in addition to the Christmas holiday. It's hard to be so far away, but I think the distance makes me more aware how precious is my contact with them and helps me make time for them.

9:18 am September 11, 2007

Elizabeth wrote :

Sometimes, even when you live in the same city as your parents, you have to make sure you're doing what you need to do for them.

Here's another perspective on this- my parents spend more time with their parents then with their kids. my grandparents are 78-90, we "kids" are in our 20s and 30s. I guess the grandparents technically need them more then we do, but I miss them. I guess this is a temporary thing, and alot of people in their 50s -the middle generation- are going thru it as people live longer.

10:26 am September 11, 2007

Les in Oklahoma wrote :

Once I hit 18 and moved out of NYC where I had grown up with my parents, life got busy. My dad was an Editor with the WSJ and faithfully typed me a letter on his IBM Selectric at least once every two weeks. (These, of course came complete with hand penciled edits.) Thanks to this effort, we wound up writing each other constantly. Even when I moved between states, which I did often, we kept up with each other. Phone calls are nice, but fade when you hang up the phone. Now that I am in my fifties and my dad has been gone for over 15 years, my mom over 10, I still have their thoughtful letters to read. I try to do the same thing with my son and daughter, (I'm in Oklahoma, son in Pittsburgh, daughter in Santa Barbara) but email is just so much easier as I'm at a computer all day, but I know that letters and even post cards from home are special. Drop a few of these in with the phone calls on the run. They'll outlast our phone conversations and even remain long after we're gone. I know. I still have and read mine.

2:09 pm September 11, 2007

Park Slope Pubby wrote :

What a touching group of comments. I live right next door to my mother, who is in her 80's, and I strongly recommend this if you can. We moved for this, my dear hubby accepted it. Her health immediately improved, between the food we were able to provide, and the company, including her grand=children, popping in and out. Now, whenever we are away, we notice she has health problems.

3:43 pm September 11, 2007

Sam in Cary wrote :

I am heartened by all the warmth I have read on these posts! You wonder if you're the only one out there struggling now and then. After a series of moves my mother made around the state(not the soundest of judgement, but she had the right), she suffered a steady decline in health. This resulted in a steady incline in my visits to see her. I saw my own family less and less and got laid off in the middle of it all. Timing eh? She finally decided to take us up on our longstanding offer to live with us after a few falls and minor hospitalization. What a stress reliever for all 3 siblings and my family! She has new Drs. and has had surgery for NPH and is better than ever. Communication can still be a challenge, but at least I know how she is from day to day. What a year!

4:47 pm September 12, 2007

Kristy wrote :

What a timely post for me, too. I just got back last night from two days away at a conference, and my husband flew out this morning and is coming back Friday, and he wants to drive to NJ to see his parents this weekend. I'm so not happy about it, but he mentioned the extreme guilt trip he gets from his mother that we never go up there except for two specific occasions a year. Our kids are 3 and almost 2, so that is PLENTY for me. But basically I just have to suck it up and go...

8:17 am November 1, 2007

Hurt and Guilty wrote :

I've never posted on anything like this, but I'm at a loss. I live about 2 hours away from my parents. I have a wonderful husband and great job, but I feel so much guilt for not being closer to my family. My family always expected me to live close to them and when I met my husband who is from Ohio (I'm from Indiana) that dream had to go away. My husband is close to his family also so we decided to live in the middle of everyone. Now my mom feels like my husband has changed and is keeping me away from visitng them. I call my mom everyday and we visit at least once a month for the entire weekend. Just this morning my mom said that we don't visit enough and now she is blaming this on my husband. The other issue is that I want to be a mom more than anything, but my own mom doesn't seem to want me to have kids. She keeps saying that it's too upsetting for her because she will never be close to her grandkids (since I live far away). I'm just at a loss. I don't know how to juggle all of the family, make my husband happy, and still be happy myself. I feel drained and full of guilt. I try to express this to my parents, but communication is not one of their strong points. I just hate the idea of them blaming my husband because they don't see me, but I'm beginning to see that happening. Once my mom is upset she holds grudge against that person. Is there anyone else out there who has a similar situation and can you offer any suggestions? I just don't know what to do anymore and I'm beginning to see my own happiness fade into a slight depression.

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About The Juggle - WSJ.com

The Juggle examines the choices and tradeoffs people make as they juggle work and family. The site provides readers with news, insight and tips on parenting, workplace issues, commuting, caregiving and other issues busy readers with families face. It is also a place for readers to share and compare their own work-and-family experiences and to seek advice and recommendations. The Juggle is includes regular contributions from other staffers at the Journal. Contact the Juggle with ideas or suggestions at thejuggle@wsj.com

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