God’s Bloopers

03May10

You’ve heard about God creating the universe, seeing that it was good and all, but have you seen the mutants he’s been spawning of late? Are they God’s bloopers, manifestations of his sense of humour, does he have a day off and let jesus do some of the creating? If it’s the former then he can’t be all powerful, if it’s the latter, he’s got quite a sadistic sense of humour for someone supposedly holy. Do these mutants look like they were personally sculpted by an all-knowing, all-powerful and all-good being, or are they more adequately explained within the theory of evolution: as random genetic mutations? These mutations fail to give their bearers a reproductive advantage amongst their kind, thus, their oddities were not “naturally selected” since this means they were not evolutionarily beneficial.

Liu Ch’ung, who Ripley met in China.

Can anyone still say “intelligent design” with a straight face?

A two headed kitten from Illinois.

There will be more of some of nature’s best bloopers up shortly, at about the pace of a freak per week, since the scanning process is long and monotonous and Freak per Week sounds crisp.

I’m not sure if these are bloopers…or purely god just having a little fun. Not saying I believe in a certain god, because mankind separately chose to create 20942980 different species of “gods, however, if a collective god were to somehow emerge, and if this said god is really to know everything about everything…think about how much stand up-material he would have. See, I see these bloopers as said “god’s” little comedy sketches. And therefore… god is kinda a dick.

Indeed! Though perhaps eternity would drag on after a while, and even all of the knowledge in the world would get boring, so he started off with the best intentions but now lashes out, or he thinks he’s an artist, crafting mutants… What’s certain is that there’s a lot more radiation, microwaves, and other potentially genetically-mutating shit about nowadays, which should give him more chances to play his games – a little convenient, methinks!