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Seriously?!?!? It's Hide and Seek for Pete's Sake!!

Why You Shouldn't Play Hide and Seek

by Rachel

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Recently it was banned from a playground in England, the topic of a sex convict's confession in New Zealand, the subject of a child's funeral here in the United States and the reason for a 911 call in my own back yard.

Can you guess what it is?

Hide and Seek. Yes, hide and seek.

In our era of parenting, there are two philosophies regarding children's interactions with the world that have seemingly emerged. Philosophy one views the world as a mostly safe place that we need to allow our children to freely experience and explore, and philosophy two views the world as a mostly dangerous place that we need to protect and shelter our children from. Then there are those who fall somewhere in the middle, parents who are aware of the dangers of the world but not fearful, and are concerned about their child's safety but not obsessed. I think those are the type of parents we should strive to be.

So whether you subscribe to philosophy one or two, whether your agree or disagree that games like hide and seek should be banned from school yard, or whether you see bad things as happening to children all the time or as a rarity, it's important to try to reach middle ground and address serious dangers around seemingly harmless things.

Like hide and seek.

Whether you advocate for playing hide and seek or not, there are principles of the game worth considering:

Hide and seek promotes secretive play. The nature of the game is to not tell anyone where you are and what you are doing.

Hide and seek asks children to hide and not come out. The nature of the game is to ask children to hide so they can't be found.

Hide and seek sends mixed messages. The nature of the game asks children to do what we've always told them not to.

Hide and seek requires mind skills young children may not have. The nature of the game requires you to differentiate between hiding for real and hiding for pretend play.

When it comes to hide and seek, what you choose to do it up to you. What's important is that you've come to your decision from an educated and informed place.

I agree with you. Normal people have played hide and seek and there is nothing wrong with them. HECK I played hide and seek and I turned out just fine. College graduate, a 3 1/2 year old, and live in a great neighborhood.

Quoting BeAmour:

Oh FFS!!!!!

Come on now, I don't see any adult now that played hide and seek, to be fucked up or confused if they should come out or hide.

Hmmm... Very interesting. I have heard this before. I wonder if you can seize the opportunity to teach the time to play and the time to be serious by using a safe word. When they are old enough, explain that hide and seek has two special rules: hide in a safe place, and listen for the "safe word". Like "Popsicles". If i say Popsicles, i am admitting you won, but that it is time to come out. Small children don't really understand the game, and that's ok... I think i might introduce it when my kids are older and I can explain... You know, don't hide in the dryer etc. It does scare me a little to think what creatively dangerous places my kids might dream up, but I also strive to make my home a safe place for them, so I would hope they wouldn't be able to find a dangerous place to hide. I like to think I fall somewhere in the middle. Give kids some slack, but within the bounds of reasonable supervision and rules.

Edit: while I do feel it might be a little over the top, my family has a history of sexual abuse (no not the predators in my family, there are people who have been molested, such as my brother in law and my aunt.... And I can see how things like hide and seek, which is normal and a fun part of childhood, can be misconstrued and abused. Maybe I am a tad paranoid about it.

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