THAT’S NOT LEGAL. NOT EVEN IN EUROPE

Say what you will about soccer being entertaining or not, but it definitely provides the best scandals. For example, Swiss first-division club FC Thun is in hot water because their players are mortal men prone to temptation, and teenage girls in full bloom know how to get what they want.

Swiss first-division side FC Thun has been hit by a scandal with 12 current or former players detained on Tuesday on suspicion of having sex with a 15-year-old girl. …

All those detained have been accused of having sexual relations with the underage girl who was one of the club’s fans. The age of consent in Switzerland is 16.

Sexual relations seem to have occurred on more than one occasion, police said in a statement, adding that the encounters appeared to have been mostly consensual.

Ah yes, "mostly consensual." Story of my life. Some people say I have a way with women, but really I just have a way with ether.