I am going off topic. Yes, I know that doesn’t happen very often. Well, sometimes it does.

So here we go:

As you all know, like many other female survivors of breast cancer I have had to recently have a complete hysterectomy. As those who have had to do this also know, it is major surgery and like it or not they staple you to your bed and home for rest.

As you my readers know, sitting still is not my strong suit. I have been reading, quilting, and watching waaaaay too much television. (Eating bon-bons are out thanks to post-surgical diet.)

So I have been very indulgent in the area of “television land”. I have re-watched Downton Abbey, caught up on Nashville and the Blacklist….and delved into reality T.V. drama. The Real Housewives franchises for the most part amuse (not the O.C. ladies but Atlanta, New Jersey and New York in particular) as do some of the other shows. I am not a Honey Boo Boo or renegade Amish people kind of watcher, I am all about good locations and good wardrobe.

I have watched the first couple episodes of the current season of Real Housewives of New York. They never disappoint and they definitely have the best wardrobe. One thing all of these shows has every season or so they last are people they are obviously “trying out” for these show franchises. Usually they end up being some sort of frenemy.

So if any of you have been watching, there are some new faces, including this woman who is an “image consultant“. She is there to help a cast member with her “image” I guess because being a viper doesn’t make this woman stand out enough.

(I know, I know you all are thinking I need to get back out in the garden and I couldn’t agree more but I can’t right now as you know.)

So this “image consultant” keeps popping up as hand maiden/pit bull of the blonde and mighty. There I sit in bed, perversely fascinated that people actually do this stuff. Then it hits me: the image consultant is trying to up her own brand by being RHONY handmaiden and is probably angling to become a housewife.

(Yes, I really do need to get back to normal life.)

Flash forward to today and I am trolling twitter on my iPad because I don’t feel like reading, don’t feel like watching T.V., don’t feel like working on my latest vintage quilt restoration and it’s nice out and I am not allowed to garden. So I see these Real Housewife of New York tweets go by from one of the remaining two “housewives” I find interesting.

So I tweeted off a reply and well I mentioned I didn’t get the wannabe housewife.

(Yes, I opened Pandora’s Twitter Box.)

OMG only in the twitterverse, the wannabe house wife shoots me a reply…and calls me “sweetie” which is New York for patronizing and “you can’t comment on the goddesses.” So I sent a reply and all of a sudden the “image consultant” has deleted her response to me. I guess wannabes have to watch those piranha instincts until they get the Bravolicious nod or something?

Anyway, her little temper tantrum in 140 characters or less has provided me with much amusement.

Twitter does amuse me. You see some seriously funny stuff go by. I don’t always get it, but I like to play now and again.

Oh and if you are interested I like Carol Radziwill and Heather Thompson. They seem to keep it as real as you can get while living part of their life out loud on a reality television show.

Now I have nattered enough on this weighty subject. But a girl has to find amusement somehow while on bed rest. I will spare you the dissertation on Nashville Wives and Southern Charm (both shows appall people I know in Charleston and Nashville).

Life is funny. You see these other snippets of what others call their own reality and wow, life is so much nicer when you don’t swim with the sharks. And I will close by saying, please don’t pet the animals in the zoo.