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Author
Topic: Condom Holes (Read 16437 times)

Hi everyone and thanks for your time in helping me out here. I had unprotected sex about 10 days ago with a girl. She said she was clean when i asked her and everything seemed fine. I have felt unusual lately and been fatigued, i have a normal temp 98.8 F. My lymph nodes do not seem swollen except for one in my armpit, but it seems very small so im not sure if its swollen at all. My tounge is white, but not totally just kinda tinted, yet im pretty sure it always has been. My mouth has some small bumps under my tounge. Thanks for your help

First up please don't use words like "clean" when referring to HIV. It infers that HIV positive people are in someway dirty. I'm HIV positive and I don't like being referred in such a way.

You had unprotected sex and so you do need to test. The window period is 13 weeks and so you should have an HIV antibody test 13 weeks from the date of this sexual encounter. In fact there are other diseases such as chlamydia which are far more prevalent and easily transmitted than HIV. You should organise a full STD screen, which will include an HIV antibody test.

HIV is a fussy, fragile virus and is not easily transmitted, particularly from female to male.

Also you should take the time to read our Welcome Thread which contains links to our lessons on testing and transmission.

Mike, HIV is not an easy virus to transmit. It's significantly harder to accomplish from female to male. BUT lower risk is not the same as no risk, so you need to learn from this experience. Everytime you have intercourse, no matter whom your partner is or what you think you know about their history you have to wear a latex condom. NO EXCEPTIONS!

As far as your symptoms are concerned there is absolutely nothing in any way HIV specific about them. The ONLY way to accurately know your HIV status is getting tested at 13 weeks after the most recent unprotected incident. Everything else is guesswork and HIV status is nothing to guess about.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

As you've been told, for a conclusive result you need to test for hiv three months after the incident. Syphilis shares a three month window period with hiv. You can test of other STIs ten days to two weeks after, or sooner if you develop a discharge from your penis.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

I had sex unprotected sex with a female 12 days ago, since then I have had a sore throat, no fever, fatigue, and unusual red bumps on my tounge, i also have a short breathe. I think there is something wrong. The girl said she is clean but im having second thoughts. The symptoms are similar to mono but i only kissed her once and it was lip to lip. Is there any hiv test that i can take that will be accurate at this time? Could this be something else or another type of Std?

No there is no approved test to be taken at this early stage. As for your friend being clean that's nice to know, I take a shower everyday also. Symptoms mean nothing when it come to HIV. You had a risk, so you will need to test at 12/13 weeks post exposure.

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

You were told yesterday about using the term "clean" to mean hiv negative. Knock it off already. It's highly insulting to those of us who are hiv positive - and we are the people taking time to answer your questions.

Symptoms or even the lack of symptoms mean nothing when it comes to hiv infection. Only the appropriate test at the appropriate time will reliably inform you of your hiv status. We do NOT discuss symptoms here. If you're worried about yours, see a doctor.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

One thing i forgot to add, the female was puerto rican and i'm only 16 shes 15 sooo..........

So what?

Mike, hiv is an equal opportunity infection. It doesn't care what ethnic background you come from or what age you are. It doesn't care how you did on your last history test or how much money you have in the bank. It can be spread through unprotected intercourse no matter who you are.

Although I'm fully expecting you to come out of this with a negative result, please learn from this incident. You MUST be using condoms until you are in a monogamous relationship where you have both tested hiv negative together.

You can have all the sex you like, just make sure your penis is covered by a condom before you put it inside another person's body. Don't forget to check out the three condom and lube links in my signature line so you know how to use them correctly. A correctly used condom rarely breaks and will protect you against hiv and other sexually transmitted infections.

Do yourself a favour and stay off internet hiv sites. Keep yourself productively busy until it's time to take your test. Again, I'm fully expecting you to test negative. Hiv is a fragile, difficult virus to transmit and more so from a woman to a man and the chance of you testing negative following a one-time incident is huge.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Ok well i had unprotected sex like i said about 5 weeks ago. My symptoms are mono like which worries me and i feel just unusual. My legs feel weak and im tired. I do not have anything unusual in my mouth except for a white tounge. My legs also tingle and i feel like i have a fever but i dont have an unusual temp. THis is very unusual and im interested in some help.

Symptoms or a lack thereof mean nothing when it comes to diagnosing HIV infection. The relevant information here is that you had unprotected sexual intercourse and, as you've been told, you need to have an HIV test 13 weeks from the date you had that sex.

I agree with Ann here. I fully expect you to test negative as a result of this.

Mike, you're spending way too much time focusing on this event. Which I guess is understandable when you're becoming sexually active, which is exciting and also scary. The odds are way in your favor that you're going to test negative.

As you've been told, and it bears repeating, from here on in no matter whom you are with you need to wear a condom everytime you have intercourse. It doesn't matter how great your partners look or what you think you about their history healthwise, a condom is a must. Period.

With regard to your symptoms, if any of them are persistent you should discuss them with your doctor.

Now get productively busy and the waiting time for your test will pass more quickly than you imagine is possible. Really.

Whatever test you choose to use, just make sure it's an approved (ie approved by your relevant health authority) HIV antibody test and you use it 13 weeks after the date of this sexual encounter and the result will be conclusive.

This all seems too coincidental, having a cold now and feeling unusual. I had symptoms also such as a sore throat 5-12 days after our contact. I still have no fever. About my lymph nodes, they have been going down. They popped up after i stayed up till 4:30 in the morning and got up at 10:00. That may have been why they have been swollen up these few weeks. But i dont know why i have a runny nose. I also have a rash on my rear side(not my back, the other rear). This seems too odd to not be something bad.

Im still unsure, i never have colds in the summer and i do have white bumps in the back of my throat and small red bumps on the front of my tounge. I weighed 167 a week ago and now i weigh 165.5 so thats a major sign.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Just a random question. Do you think hiv can be transmitted during physical exercise such as boxing? I dont always mean blood involved but if there is blood involed can it infect the other person. Do you think close contact in boxing can affect your partner because of the blood and sweat?

Of course we've heard of PEP. It has to be initiated no longer than 72 hours after possible infection - although your situation would not have warranted it.

PEP is short for Post Exposure Prophylaxis - it entails taking anti-hiv drugs for 28 days. These drugs are quite toxic and many people discontinue PEP before the 28 days have passed because of side-effects. It's not something to take lightly nor is it something to take in a case (like yours) where transmission has most likely NOT occurred.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Well im thinking of getting a home hiv test, the ones you can buy at walmart and they are sent to a lab. The results are said to be 99% accurate and im pretty sure the fda approved it. Where can i get an Elisa quicktest or an oratest? Are they sold at a cvs or riteaid?

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Ah my bro wont get me a test n my mom n dad aint takin me for a test. My bro says it take 8 years to get aids so he says its ight. My gurl says she got a test on aug first n it was negative, she says she was at the hospital for six hours gettin tests n shes negative. I dunno if shes tellin the truth, but f$ck it if i got something i decied. Ill prolly be dead before eight years. Like i aint gettin a test or nothing n theres such a low chance i got hiv i think im makin these symptoms come on by stress and when i think about it i become in fear. So this isnt nothing.

Ah my bro wont get me a test n my mom n dad aint takin me for a test. My bro says it take 8 years to get aids so he says its ight. My gurl says she got a test on aug first n it was negative, she says she was at the hospital for six hours gettin tests n shes negative. I dunno if shes tellin the truth, but f$ck it if i got something i decied. Ill prolly be dead before eight years. Like i aint gettin a test or nothing n theres such a low chance i got hiv i think im makin these symptoms come on by stress and when i think about it i become in fear. So this isnt nothing.

Mike,

You did have a very low risk and ultimately the decision to test is one for you. You have to make that decision, not your girlfriend or your brother - who doesn't know shit when it comes to HIV, by the way, so stop listening to him about this.

Surely there must be some way you can access reliable confidential HIV antibody testing where you live. If you do decide to test, I really don't think home testing is the answer for you. I feel you could benefit from the pre and post test counselling that you get a clinic which specialises in these matters.

well the girl says that she got tested at the hospital. I dunno if hospitals do testing. I can find a place but i dont think i got hiv , i think im being a girl about this n if i do then ill get it outta my system anyway i can.

well the girl says that she got tested at the hospital. I dunno if hospitals do testing. I can find a place but i dont think i got hiv , i think im being a girl about this n if i do then ill get it outta my system anyway i can.

MIke,

As I said the decision to test is ultimately yours and you have to be responsible for yourself. HIV is an extraordinarily serious disease and is nothing to make guesses about, much less take the word of other people when it comes to your personal situation.

As we've noted all along, the likelihood that you're HIV positive is very low. We can't rule it out, but it seems very unlikely. So if you're not worried about it, don't test. If you're concerned get tested, but whatever you do make the decision based on sound reasoning, not what your girlfriend might or might not have told you.

I know . I may get tested but i think she aint lying. Im on probation n all that good stuff so im back in my hood now n i cant worry about that stuff cuz she aint lyin 2 me. It could be worse, hiv aint the end of the world but i dont think i got it. Good luck 2 everyone wit hiv n there will be a cure soon wit this technolgy so dont sweat nothing. Im out ffrom these forums. NVH( Northview Heights) Pittsburgh stand up puttin it down nvh.

If you're old enough to be having sex, then you're old enough to get yourself to a testing center to get tested. Or do your parents and/or brother take you by the hand to your sexual hook-ups too?

Sex comes with certain responsibilities - such as making sure, number one, that you use condoms to protect your health and two, getting regular sexual health care check ups. If you're not old enough to take care of these two things, maybe you're not old enough to be having sex.

You've got the rest of your life for sex. Don't mess it up over a few minutes of pleasure.

And when you do have sex, make sure you're using condoms. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever. Remember that.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

well i just talked to my bro he is a biochemial engineer with a phd for it he says that hiv is a dormant virus that takes over five years to devolp symptoms and it is extremly unlikely i got it from one time with a girl.He also said you cannot show symptoms in six weeks. So i guess im not getting any testing done.

HIV is NOT a dormant virus that "takes x amount of time" to develop into AIDS. There is no set time for when a person develops AIDS. It's different in everyone and HIV is always active in a positive person's body, busily destroying their immune system.

So your mate the biochemical engineer clearly knows three quarters of fuck all when it comes to HIV disease progression.

The bottom line is this; you had a low risk. It's unlikely you have HIV, but since you have access to suitable testing you need to make a decision about getting tested. Not other people, you buddy. You decided to have unprotected sex and now YOU have to deal with the consequences.

So decide one way or the other. But stop coming in here with all this I will/I won't carry on. Just make a damn decision.

Im finally taking my test tommrow but results wont be back until sunday when i call the clinic. What are the chances of a one time incident on a girl that claims to have been tested and is negative. I think shes honest but im getting tested so i can stop worring about this. I have annoyed her every minute for the past month so i think shes honest. What are my chances of coming out negative and do you think i will come out negative?

My uncut partner didn't become infected despite a year and a half worth of unprotected sex with me. We're still together many years later and he's still negative. We started using condoms when we discovered my positive hiv status. Condoms work - they prevent hiv infection.

I do not expect you to get anything other than a negative result from this one time incident. BUT, the only way to know for sure is to test.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Tim Horn went much easier on you than I would have regarding your asking people via PM how they got infected. This kind of activity is very rude and if I hear of you doing it again, you will be given a time out. I don't care how worried you are, it doesn't give you the right to go questioning people about their private lives.

Make sure you read BOTH of the stickied threads that appear at the top of this forum and keep all your questions in THIS thread only. Thank you for your cooperation.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

I rejected the new account you applied for. We only allow one account per person here and this is something you agreed to when you became a member. This information is also contained in the Welcome thread.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

I have had shortness of breathe for around a month to 2 months. This all occured after i had unprotected sex. Can this be any symptom or sign of an hiv infection? I am also tired more easily now and feel fatigued. On my forehead i have developed colorless bumps that i have never seen before. Whats holding me back on all this hiv things is that my lymph nodes were swollen and have been going down lately.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

That's what they've been trying to tell you Mike. Not all people have symptoms that go through seroconversion. I didn't have any symptoms when I went through seroconversion. Serocoversion can take on average 22 days from time of infection. For one to test postive can take 6 weeks to 3 months.