Friday Zing!

• FSU’s best intercollegiate team — with an average ranking of No. 4 over the last eight years — starts its season today: The women’s soccer team takes on Portland, a previous national champion. Go ’Noles!

• Governor, that tightrope you’ve decided to walk is pretty funny to most reasonable people, scientists or not, until we realize just how serious it really is.

• After the chanting, looting, yelling, screaming and sign-carrying are over, then what?

• The official Tallahassee rain gauge must be under a roof.

• The Zing!er is right. Nothing like “drafting” a school bus, especially in heavy traffic.

• The “Under New Management” sign is out at the FSU golf course. That ought to pack them in.

• I’m Barack Obama, and after seeing our American beheaded by ISIS, I must face a frightening reality: It will take me at least a week to get my golf swing back.