"Your body is the first thing any child of man ever wanted. Therefore dispose yourself to be loved, to be wanted, to be available. Be there for them with a vengeance. Be a gracious, bending woman. Incline your ear, your heart, your hands to them.... To be a Mother is to be the sacrament - the effective symbol - of place. Mothers do not make homes, they are our home." from Bed and Board, Robert Farrar Capon

Monday, February 27, 2012

One of my sisters forwarded this to me and it really encouraged me. It's nothing new (in fact Luther wrote it almost 450 years ago) but in the midst of the day to day tasks of motherhood it is so easy to forget...

" Our natural reason looks at marriage and turns up its nose and says, "Alas! Must I rock the baby? Wash its diapers? Make its bed? Smell its stench? Stay at nights with it? Take care of it when it cries? Heal its rashes and sores? And on top of that care for my spouse, provide labor at my trade, take care of this and take care of that? Do this and do that? And endure this and endure that? Why should I make such a prisoner of myself?"

What then does Christian faith say to this? It opens its eyes, looks upon all these insignificant, distasteful and despised duties in the spirit, and is aware that they are all adorned with divine approval as with the costliest gold and jewels.

It says, "O God, I confess I am not worthy to rock that little babe or wash its diapers, or to be entrusted with the care of a child and its mother. How is it that I without any merit have come to this distinction of being certain that I am serving thy creature and thy most precious will? Oh, how gladly will I do so. Though the duty should be even more insignificant and despised, neither frost nor heat, neither drudgery nor labor will distress me for I am certain that it is thus pleasing in thy sight."

Thursday, February 16, 2012

The other night, when I had finally plopped down onto the couch at the end of a long day, my baby girl came crawling over and I noticed she had cookie crumbs all over her face. (One of her big brothers or sisters must have been being generous.) And of course no one was anywhere in sight to whom I could pass off the job of taking her to the kitchen and wiping down her hands and face.

I groaned. I could not muster the energy to get up. So what did I do?
I brushed all the crumbs off into my hand. And then guess what?

I ate them.

Hey, there comes a point (you're probably not there yet, and most likely never will be, you classy gal)
when exhaustion finally trumps squeamishness, etiquette, and even... self-respect.
So now you know.

The following is an excerpt from the book "How Do You Find the Time?" by Pat King. She had ten children, and she tells how she learned (sometimes the hard way) that there is a war against us enjoying our children. I think I first read the book in 1976, the year I had my first baby. Then I read it several more times through the years (probably whenever I felt completely buried in laundry, diapers, and messes). Looking back over the years, I can see how much this book helped shape my attitude about what is really important. Here's an excerpt:"Children take time. If we have been called by God to be mothers, let's drop all the activities that are making it so painful for us to enjoy our children.

It takes half an hour to feed a toddler breakfast.

Half an hour to bathe and dress him.

Half an hour to clean up what he shouldn't have gotten into.

It takes half and hour to sit with a four-year-old, working a puzzle for the first time.

It takes half an hour to listen to a six-year-old's reading lesson.

It takes half an hour to coach a teenager in history.

It takes twenty minutes to share a cup of tea with a young daughter.

It takes uncountable hours to drive a carpool.

It takes fifteen minutes, six times a day, to discipline a child who has decided to test you.

It takes fifteen minutes, each night, to listen to each child's prayers.

All these things that must be done with our children are at war with all that society tells us, or that we tell ourselves, we must do elsewhere.

For me the war ended abruptly, and with it the misery, with the realization that I didn't have to be any of those people that magazines so subtly insisted I should be. I didn't have to be a "great" housekeeper or an enviable cook. I didn't have to wear any of those "hats" ... I didn't have to be any of those people that the media insisted were so important: the politically involved, the champion of the down-trodden, or even the exciting, innovative hostess.Sometimes we make life so complicated, and get our time so parceled out, that half an hour for a child's story, or two hours for an afternoon game, or 15 minutes to clean up a quart of spilled milk throws our schedule and our dispositions into a fury."

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

"What is the essence of the cross that each Christian must of necessity carry willingly, even joyfully?

Jesus defines it for us with all its flesh-piercing splinters and slivers. He defines it in such a way that there could never be a time when an aware Christian would be unaware of his need for the compassionate Christ, who gives rest to the weary and refreshes the burdened.

The essence of the cross in every stage of life and in every changing circumstance is this:

Self denial.

He tells us, 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.' (Mark 8:34)

Again, with what mastery Jesus sums up the whole matter in Mark 8!

Self denial will always be difficult, will always be a struggle.

Hence, to undertake such is to take up a heavy, flesh-ripping backbreaking cross.

For what is it that everyone wants by nature?

What is it that is at the very heart and core of each one of us?

Each wants to save his life and not lose it. And to fallen man the essence of saving life is not

merely the continuance of bodily functions. It is rather that one's own will be done.

To do the will of another or to have one's own will denied is to lose life."

Monday, February 13, 2012

I stumbled on this online article from the British newspaper "The Telegraph". Really, it was a complete accident but I thought it was very interesting that it was in a newspaper.

Field wants school pupils to be given classes in parenting

02 Feb 2009

Parents who put their children before work will rescue British society

Parenting is vital and absolutely not something to outsource, says Gill Hornby.

Well, at last. For every parent who has ever put family over career, this is your moment. Everybody who has ever been asked "And what do you do?" at a dinner party, who has answered "I stay at home with my children" and who has spent the rest of the evening looking at a turned shoulder – now you can gloat.

If you have ever been told the funny story about how the toddler cried when the nanny left the room and the mother entered, and you didn't get the joke, now you know: it wasn't funny after all. The Children's Society's report into the living conditions of young people in Britain today has published some radical thoughts.

The authors have dared to attack the prevailing "selfish and individualistic" culture of the past 20 or 30 years, which insists that both parents should work and that childcare should be outsourced. It dares to remind us that "childrearing is one of the most challenging tasks in life".

It insists that being brought up in a single parent family is socially and emotionally damaging for children, and that they – boys and girls – need a father as well as a mother.

... Some of us can at least take heart that one group of experts said that bringing up your own children isn't such a bad thing to do after all.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

The Liturgy is such a wonderful prayer. I like to read it over at times with my different children or myself in mind. Here are some excerpts.

"We pray through Thy boundless mercy that Thou will graciously behold this child, Thy servant, whom Thou has called to instruction in the faith, drive away from her all blindness of heart, break all the snares of the devil with which she is bound. Open to her, Lord, the door of Thy grace, so that she may be free of the stench of all evil lusts and serve Thee joyfully according to the sweet savor of Thy commandments in Thy church, and grow daily and come to the grace of Thy baptism. Bless her with true faith in the spirit so that by means of this saving flood all that has been born in her from Adam and to which she herself has added may be drowned in her and engulfed, and that she may be sundered from the unbelieving, preserved dry and secure in the holy ark of the church, serve Thy name at all times, fervent in spirit and joyful in hope, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen."

"Therefore thou miserable devil, acknowledge thy judgment and give glory to the true and living God, and give glory to his Son, Jesus Christ, and to the Holy Ghost, and depart thou unclean spirit and give room to the Holy Spirit; for God and our Lord Jesus Christ has of His goodness called this child to His holy grace and blessing, and to the fountain of baptism."

"It is your task as parents to confess with the whole Church the faith in our God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, in whose name this child is baptized. After this child is baptized you are at all times to remember her in your prayers, put her in mind of her Baptism, and, as much as lies within you, give her counsel and aid, that she be brought up in the true knowledge and worship of God and be taught the Ten Commandments, the Creed, and the Lord's Prayer; and that, as she grows in years, you place in her hands the Holy Scriptures, bring her to the services of God's house, and provide for her further instruction in the Christian faith, that she come to the Sacrament of Christ's Body and Blood and thus, abiding in His baptismal grace and in communion with the Church, she may grow up to lead a Godly life to the praise and honor of Jesus Christ."

"Lord and Giver of life, look with kindness upon the father and mother of this child, and upon all our parents. Let them ever rejoice in the gift you have given them. Enable them to be teachers and examples of righteousness for their children. Strengthen them in their own Baptism so that they may share eternally with their children the salvation you have given them through Jesus Christ, our Lord."

"Almighty God, the father of our Lord Jesus Christ, has given you the new birth of water and the Spirit and has forgiven you all your sins. May he strengthen you with His grace to life everlasting. The Lord preserve your coming in and your going out from this time forth and forevermore. Amen."