Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! You Real Housewives of New York City fans just got a drunkenly wrapped package dropped under your tree! TMZ and the Palm Beach Post report that “Money Can’t Buy You Class (But Hopefully It Can Make Your Bail)” singer and RHONYC “star” Ex-Countess Luann De Lesseps was busted by the Palm Beach PD early this morning for “being drunk and disorderly and for attacking a cop.” Please please please tell us there was a film crew there. What am I saying? This was probably in the damn script. Did she slur out the chorus to “Chic, C’est La Vie” in the back of the cop car?

The Ex-Countess, 52, is giving her ALL in that mug shot. Behold a boozy tigress readying to make the drunk tank her elegant personal playground! That’s the smoldering look a lady gives when she’s moments away from shredding her Spanx in the name of middle-aged sexual ferocity! Or it’s the look you give while trying to appear sober before you suddenly make for the toilette to vom. Either/or.

The Palm Beach Post says that the full charges made against the Ex-Countess were “battery on an officer, disorderly intoxication, resisting arrest with violence, counts of corruption by threat and crimes against a person.” There’s four felonies in there. That sounds like definite community service in some of Palm Beach’s nicer assisted living residences. She was booked into the county jail at 1:30 AM and released without bond a couple of hours later. She’s due back in court on Jan 25. And the best part?

De Lesseps declared, “I’m going to kill you all” just before her arrest, and slammed a door and kicked at least one cop, according to the state’s attorney.

Free Ex-Countess Luann! One question we need answered is whether or not she was threatening to kill the cops or her fellow cast members? That Ramona Singer biddy with the crazy eyes and vexing personality could drive even the most refined lady to murder.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).