The Power of Unconscious Rules

Who’s seen Kyle Cease’s “Evolving Out Loud” opener? If you haven’t, be sure to check it out at the bottom of this post. He’s the first transformational comedian I’ve heard of, he inspires me greatly – – and he cracks me up. I decided to queue it up this morning as Kyle’s message is part of what’s inspired and led me to create this blog. In Evolving Out Loud, Kyle talks about creating from a space of happiness, really connecting to the creator in you rather than the fear-based you. The real power is in creating from a space of love for others rather than what you can get out of it.

My mission and passion for this blog is to share love and possibility with my readers, especially with women who know they are not here on this planet to fit in, be “normal” and live like everyone else. We are pioneers, visionaries, game-changers, explorers, trail blazers, global citizens, nomads, geeks, and shakers of the status quo. We are ready to stand up and step out, or as Kyle says, “Show up and stay in the room”. It’s time for us to show up and stick to our truth, to share our love for unique-ness with others, to inspire and encourage others to tap into what matters for them. And we start this by tapping into this for ourselves. It’s like the flight attendants say on every take off message, “Place your oxygen mask on yourself before assisting others”. You need to begin by loving what is unique about you, embrace your uniqueness and your brilliance by allowing it to shine out in every area of your life. Be fully YOU everywhere you are and in everything you do.

Have you ever been in a group or at an event where someone really allowed themselves to be themselves? How did it make you feel? Was it uncomfortable at first? Why do you suppose that was? I personally think we’ve been so well trained by our educational systems and society to fit in, to be obedient and to do what everyone else is doing, that when we see someone “breaking that rule”, we feel uncomfortable. You have to really ask yourself if you need to agree with that rule anymore. I’m guessing in your logical thoughts, you can agree that “fitting in” and being like everyone else isn’t a rule you agree with. So why the negative reaction to someone breaking that rule? It’s our unconscious training and beliefs that are hard at work, running on automatic based on rules and lessons that were plugged in from your earliest moments of life. We are taking in ideas, beliefs, rules, concepts and our brain is constantly fitting them in to what we already believe and understand. Once you make this process a conscious one – being aware, practicing mindfulness in the sense of being awake and conscious, questioning what you’ve always assumed and re-evaluating the beliefs, rules and status quo – you’re free to start re-writing your rules, your beliefs, and your own life.

My challenge to you today is to start asking yourself honestly where you’ve been running on auto-pilot. What rules and beliefs are running your life and making your decisions for you? What’s one rule you now notice that you’ve been living by but that you no longer agree with? And what action are you going to take to begin re-writing that rule for yourself and your life?

While you meditate on that, check out the Kyle Cease clip I mentioned earlier. I’ve set this video to start around the 9 minute mark, as that’s when it gets REALLY good, but feel free to watch the whole thing 😉