Random rants, epic misadventures, always a good time.

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Minivans and Other Unsettling Developments

So I’m having twins this summer. WT fucking fuck? There I was at the OBGYN, knowing I was knocked up but expecting to see just ONE baby on the ultrasound. I knew the one anticipated baby would be challenging, given I already have a toddler, but I figured I could more or less handle ONE additional child and was generally excited. TWO babies, as the doctor quickly announced were floating within the confines of my uterus, is an entirely different proposition.

TWO. BABIES.

I have numerous fears and anxieties about this development, which I don’t really feel like listing here, because I am trying to remain positive and not let myself spin down a crippling panic vortex. Not productive! Basically, my current womb situation is a great lesson in learning to let go of what you can’t control. If you worry about an outcome and it actually happens (unlikely), you will suffer twice! Yeah, all of that stuff. I’m being really zen about this shit. At least right now. Check in with me later this evening when I’m sobbing to my husband and shoving Girl Scout cookies down my gullet (Thin Mints are for basics, btw. Team Samoas, Tagalongs and Dosidos all the way).

Not Helpful

What Yo Do When You’re Having Two is a book I immediately purchased and read, because I am really good at impulse purchasing Amazon’s most popular PRIME eligible result for any given search string. It was very little help, do not buy this book. My two takeaways: 1. Since the author’s infant twins stopped breathing in her home a total of FIVE TIMES my babies will probably die. 2. A staggering 85% of twin mothers experience postpartum depression. So I have that to look forward to! Also, this book was completely devoid of helpful advice for parents how already have one (or more) children and are expecting twins. Instead the author made really supportive statements like “if you already have a child and are having twins, you deserve a medal!” Wow, thanks so much. I’ll keep that mind when I’m having a complete nervous breakdown in about nine months once I’m dealing with two newborns and a two year old. Amazon fail!

Can we get this one? Via amateuridiotprofessionaldad

Anyway, in other fun news we’ve decided to purchase a minivan, which is something I had always sworn I would never, ever do after becoming a parent. But following much debate and some tears (who cries over minivans? Pregnant me, apparently), I’m pretty sure it’s the sensible thing to do. I think we are getting one with AWD and leather seats at least, so maybe we are still a little cool? Ugh, I really just typed that.