– Teddy Long takes over as the Raw general manager thanks to an edict from the mysterious Board Of Directors, meaning nothing will be planned out, Randy Orton will probably have at least three matches and Teddy will be waiting by the curtain to interrupt any kerfuffles with an impromptu tag team match announcement. Also, if we’re lucky, the return of the White Boy Challenge.

– Pre-emptive best: David Otunga and Teddy long switching clothes, finding out that they’ve been accidentally wearing each others’ sizes.

– The Rock will be in the house! Or he won’t.

– Triple H and the Undertaker were oddly absent on last week’s show, which nearly guarantees a solid 33 minutes of THIS BUSINESS to open up tonight. I hope they reveal that when they say “this business” they don’t mean wrestling, they mean public speaking.

Remember, the top 10 comments from tonight’s open discussion thread will be featured as my fave five ‘longside muh boy D-Bryan right here in tomorrow’s Best and Worst Of WWE Raw report. That makes you an Internet celebrity by proxy!

Also something to remember: To nominate a comment for one of the top 10 of the night, be sure to reply with +1. That’ll make it easier for me to differentiate between the 2,000-or-so comments that are left.

1. Are we positive that The Rock doesn’t have dementia or possibly had a stroke? Could that be why he keeps repeating himself and can only remember his catchphrases?

2. After that HBK and HHH promo, I was a little disappointed when WWE didn’t have one of those Did You Know screens dedicated to them, just to recap their conversation. “Did you know HBK and HHH have been friends for 17 years! Also, THIS BUSINESS” I get it, you guys are friends…now make out already.

Just got done watching on I-live-overseas-right-now-delay, and I really only have one question:
Does The Rock think he’s a Centaur, or that his mom had sex with a horse?
Screw history lessons, homeboy needs a biology lesson.

Rock is giving promos where he’s almost on the verge of not sucking, and then ruins it all with a stupid line or Twitter reference or eHarmony bio or whatever. Then he says a serious line like “I am going to rip your throat out”, and it’s such a total non sequitur that you’re left to scratch your head and wonder why he didn’t just do THAT in the first place.

Then you have Cena, who makes jokes about this guy, and doesn’t take anything seriously. He’s your typical Boston douchebag prick, who will smirk in your face and always have some smartass thing to say, because he’s too cocky and/or stupid to know that he should be taking something…ANYTHING seriously.

My question is this…The Rock, in his career, has beaten EVERYONE. Movie star or not, he should be getting respect for what he accomplished in “this business (TM Triple H). When he doesn’t GET that respect, it should make him angry enough to say something about it. The Rock circa 2000 would’ve smacked Cena to death for smirking in his face the way he was. This Rock just says “Yeah? Well…I’m gonna win!” and walks out.

So basically we have thoroughly unlikeable cocky douchebag party-jock being a prick to a guy who clearly doesn’t care whether he wins or loses. Why should I care? If they don’t, I don’t.

Shawn Michaels is mad that Aytch gets to ‘Mania with Taker instead of going towel shopping with him. They were supposed to go to Bed Bath & Beyond and now Aytch has ruined EVERYTHING. Now how will they match to the little soaps?!

So it seemed like they were going to get serious and move past all the fruity pebble goofy shit. On top of that, I was actually starting to root for Cena. Now they’re going to have a concert next week. Fuck.