I watched the big political debate everyone was talking about. The first candidate came across a bit smug, self-centered and more than a tad arrogant. Reminded me of a brazen Stephen Harper. The alternative candidate was more personable but left me with a nagging, uneasy feeling. What was said was swell, but the rhetoric was short on details. I can understand why some voters see their task as that of choosing the least-dangerous of two evils. Personally, I was in favor of Bernie Sanders for president, but that’s a moot point considering I can’t vote in US elections.

Oh, you were expecting a discussion of the local debate. Well, as it happens, Dr StrangeJob actually sees himself as the Bernie Sanders of the CBRM Municipal Elections. Like Sanders, Dr StrangeJob was unceremoniously blocked from the ballot box, although he is clearly the most popular of the candidates. As of this writing, the Rankin For Mayor Facebook page has 2,754 likes, the Re-elect Cecil Clarke page has 1,168 likes, but the Dr StrangeJob page is well over 20,000 likes (so what if most of them are from Brazil). Also, in a recent Twitter poll, six of seven respondents selected Dr StrangeJob as the person they would most like to see as the next mayor of CBRM. No wonder his opponents colluded to remove him from the ballot.

Dr StrangeJob’s name may not have made it to the ballot, but his “yet-to-be-released delegates” clearly hold the balance of power. Again, like Sanders, the Doctor’s strategy is to negotiate policy concessions from his opponents. In political terms, Dr StrangeJob can be bribed. No, I am not talking about a $200,000 a year job or even a new hat. Well, maybe a new job.

Let the negotiations begin! I will start by suggesting opening bids for each candidate. Actually, I am still thinking about MacSween’s bid. It’s on the tip of my tongue, but I, um, oh, um, ah, I just can’t seem to spit it out. If Clarke, on the other hand, would like the Doctor to release his delegates to his camp, then Clarke must promise to resign within one year if he does not make significant movement on the CBRM port file. To be fair, I am not asking Clarke to promise anything that he has not promised before; however, this time there is one small caveat –his promise must be notarized and legally binding. Promise me once, shame on you; promise me twice, shame on me.

Until next time—that’s my two cents’ worth.

Dr. StrangeJob is a local satirical blogger, retired educator, social activist, and developer of the world’s first 12+1 step self-help group, Incompetents Anonymous.