Making life better for kids

May 11, 2003|By Devin Rose.

Cook County Public Guardian Patrick Murphy, who recently announced plans to retire in the fall, will be remembered as a passionate champion of abused and neglected children. Q recently asked him: What can the average person do to make kids' lives better?

"It's very, very important to spend time with your kids," he said. "I didn't have my kids till I was in my 40s, and I was home every night to have dinner with them. The best thing any adult can do for kids is give them time. If you're an uncle or a friend or an aunt, you can spend time with them too."

Murphy has two sons, ages 18 and 21. His older son goes to DePaul University, "but he's still calling home asking what's for dinner and coming over half the week."

But being there for kids isn't just about the good times, Murphy stressed.

"A good parent is there when the kid is miserable and mean and terrible. That's what parenting is."

Also, men play a huge role.

"Kids, particularly boys in their teens, need men in their lives. Men who run from their kids should be flayed. I'd say 90 to 95 percent of kids we see [in the court system] are there because they have no men in their lives."

But what about the kid who's not part of the family--the kid down the street who looks dirty and sad and scared?

"Call the police or DCFS and hope and pray they do the right thing," Murphy said.

The hot line for the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services is 800-25-ABUSE .