It wasn’t just a burrito, it was the Ultimate burrito!
First, we start with a crunchy all-beef taco smothered in nacho cheese, lettuce, tomato and our special southwestern sauce.
Wrap it in a soft flour tortilla with a layer of refried beans in between.
Wrap that in a savory corn tortilla with a middle layer of monterey jack cheese.
Take a deep-fried gordita shell, smear on a layer of our special guacamolito sauce, and wrap that around the outside.
Bake it in a corn husk filled with pico de gallo, then wrap that in an authentic Parisian crepe, filled with egg, gruyere, merguez sausage and portabello mushrooms.
Wrap the whole thing in a Chicago-style deep dish meat-lover’s pizza.
Roll it up in a blueberry panacke, dip it in batter, and deep fry until it’s golden brown.
Serve it in commemorative tote bag filled with spicy vegetarian chili

No lie. An old bitch I once worked with saw a black man put a plastic shopping bag in the trash can outside our building and said she was going to call the police because she just knew there was a fetus in the bag. She made me go look and it was filled with wet paper towels. So, I tied the plastic bag over her head and let her suffocate. Then I called the police and blamed it on the black guy. Okay. The last part about homicide is made up. But the rest is true.