Texas Tech football coach Mike Leach assembles a restaurant-quality rant here, discussing the temperament of his players and how they managed to get utterly destroyed by Texas A&M last week.

“As coaches, we failed to make our coaching points and our points more compelling than their fat little girlfriends. Now, their fat little girlfriends have some obvious advantages. For one thing, their fat little girlfriends are telling them what they want to hear, which is how great [they] are, and how it’s easy it’s gonna be. We had a whole bunch of people that wanted to win the football game, but nobody wanted to play the football game.”

Leach goes on to promise that some of his players will be “inconvenienced” as they prepared to host Kansas tomorrow. No fat little girlfriends were available for comment. Thanks, Brent