Femina has been capturing the essence of the Indian woman for 58 years now, and has evolved with her over the years bringing the world to her doorstep. And now, here's your chance to get the dope on everything--from celebrities and fashion, beauty and wellness, to lifestyle and relationships--delivered directly to your inbox. Plus expert tips, polls, contests and other interactive articles and a whole lot more!

Worst sex tips found on the internet

You think you might get the answers you need on the internet, but sometimes, all you end up with are bizarre tips and suggestions that make you wonder why you even got online. This is true especially where sex is concerned, and so we’ve rounded up a few ludicrous sex tips that we’re sure will make you laugh out loud.

The one where you’re supposed to feed each other ice cream in the dark and lick off whatever you spill on each other.

This one is just illogical. Not to mention, it’s an invitation for ants and rodents to raid your space.

This one made us guffaw. Hold his penis and lightly slap it, and tap it back and forth like a tennis ball, and then also pinch the skin on his testicles.

We don’t know why this tip even exists.

The one where you sprinkle pepper under his nose because sneezing feels similar to an orgasm and apparently intensifies the orgasm.

And let that pepper reach his eyes and possibly hurt them?!

The uneconomical tip where you’re to bind his hands behind his back with your bra, cover your nipples in some or the other toppings and have him lick it off.

We can understand you wanting him to lick something off you, but why would you ruin a perfectly nice (and expensive) bra?

The one where you’re supposed to firmly, but without breaking skin, press a fork into his body parts.

So now we’ve graduated to stabbing each other with cutlery.

That one where you hold down on his earlobes with your fingers and use them to rock back and forth as you’re riding him.

All we can suggest is not doing this to anyone, EVER.

And then, that gem about lightly biting his scrotum.

Don’t do this. At least not until you’ve been asked to do it.

The fetish-y tip about tickling his feet with your nipples.

We’re not quite sure what this would achieve except make for a very funny scene.

The absolutely archaic tip about not making the first move because guys will think you’re desperate.

Could this be any more regressive?

That gem again where he’s supposed to bite your clit.

And we say again, never bite the genitalia unless you’re expressly told to!