Crying for Adventure – Rebekah Benson

I can’t stop crying. I really didn’t expect the tears. They just accidentally started coming out.

We just signed a contract to sell our house.

This house is nothing special, really. It’s an older house. When we bought it, it needed a lot of love. Actually, three months of tireless, toiling love to transform it to something that was cozy and live-able. When we bought it, all the walls were painted pink except for the bathroom upstairs. That was a creepy 70’s yellow painted to match the yellow tub with yellow tiles and the yellow toilet. Eww…nobody needs a yellow toilet. There were floor to ceiling mirrors in the living room and dining room- in case we wanted to stare at ourselves while we ate. There was asbestos in the linoleum that had to be removed and rat poop in the attic. All my favorite things. We had many friends come and love us by working alongside us. We put a lot of work into it. We put our stamp on it, and it became not just our house, but our beloved home.

We only bought this house because of the yard. Oh, this yard. It was an overgrown jungle when we arrived, but Duane has put in many, many weeks of back-breaking work and transformed it into a paradise. It’s a beautiful sunny day as I type this – perfect for sitting back there and enjoying the peacefulness that it brings.

We dreamed for many years of having a food forest. We love the concepts of permaculture and sustainability. And now we have over 50 fruiting plants. Mostly a huge variety of fruit trees, along with some awesome berry bushes and grape vines. It takes a few years to get a good harvest when you plant a fruit tree. And last summer, we looked at our trees and said excitedly, “Next year! Next year is the year! The trees are almost ready!” I know there will be an awesome harvest this year.

But we will be gone before the first fruit is ripe.

We have chickens (who we’ve had a love-hate relationship with) and we raised some of them from the eggs that the girls laid in our coop. We had dreams of honey bees and rabbits. We even had an amazing tree-climbing goat named Cookie Dough that lived here until the Chupacabra got him. For reals.

We wanted a place where our boys could run and play and climb trees and imagine and just do awesome boy things. This is seriously the best yard for boys and imaginations. Duane and his dad built and amazing treehouse for them and then put in a zipline going from the treehouse down to the chicken coop. Ezra loves to climb to the top of the treehouse railing and leap off, letting the zipline catch him on the way down and then he flips upside-down for the rest of the ride. Scares me every time. There is a forest in the back that is perfect for Airsoft wars or for hunting for that chupacabra and wild pigs, or for hiding from zombies. There have been have been pirates, aliens, ninjas, and army men back there. Many stick-sword fights in that yard and water balloon fights and hose battles. There are lizards and even a few and snakes that we caught. Tarantulas and scorpions that Micah roasted over the fire and ate. He swears the tarantulas taste like lobster.

But the best thing about this house are all the memories we have had here. Soccer games and bocce ball tournaments on the front yard. Slack line competitions. Laying in a hammock together watching rain drops fall on our faces. Watching the most amazing lightening storms from the windows.

Walking in the back with my husband or sitting on one of his homemade benches talking and dreaming about our life. Duane built a big fire ring way in the back and made some awesome benches out of the cedar trees. So many friends have come over to sit around the fire and dream and talk about life as we roast delicious things. We’ve had about 50 families and groups stay here with us in our Airbnb, many of whom are now our friends. We even had a band stay here that made a video in the backyard (Mother Folk – Thank You’s). Wrestling matches with Dad on the living room floor. Many, many dinners filled with laughter in that dining room. Meals made together in that kitchen. I will miss these things so, so much. And how will I keep the closet door that has my kids increasing heights marked out in pencil?

We didn’t even list our house for sale yet. We really weren’t ready. But a firefighter friend of Duane’s wanted to come check it out and then shocked us by putting in an offer. It is so crazy to me how quickly and smoothly this has all gone so far. I know we have over a month until closing and lots can happen in those days, but the idea of selling this beloved place to a friend is so comforting. We negotiated most of our furniture into the deal as well and they are even keeping our chickens and our cat. Now when we come back to say hello, it will be like our old house, only it will be a different family making it their home.

We know we won’t be able to afford a place anything like this when we return. House prices have jumped since we bought it. We’ll tell you our ideas for our return in another post on another day, but they are a little wacky as well. Life will likely be very, very different. Duane and I look at each other just about every day and ask, “What are we doing? Are we crazy?” and then we keep on moving forward with the plan. (If you don’t know about our plans, read the post titled “How We Got Here.”)

We prayed for a long time for this house. I cried many tears, begging God for a place of our own with an amazing yard for the boys. And God gave us such a beautiful gift with this place. We dreamed a long time for this. And now we are trading this dream for another. I am grieving the dream today and will be for awhile. We want this change and are so excited for our adventure, but it is hard to let go of this one…

It just got real. Now it’s hitting me. This thing is happening!

Let us know what’s happing in your life. What grand adventures are you about to embark on? And we don’t just mean travel adventures…