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No, Mary Jane, No

Few things are more disgruntling than trying to have a conversation with someone who has checked out for another planet. That’s part of the reason I don’t think that marijuana should be legalized. It’s hard enough to have a sane and rational conversation without dealing with someone with paisley brain cells.

When trying to justify the legalization of marijuana, some may point a crooked finger at prohibition and the legalization of hooch, but it is possible to have one or two drinks without going over the edge. With marijuana that’s just not the case. You are either stoned or you are not.

And people have gotten themselves into some pretty fine fixes when they are high. Even though the official cause of the September 2008 Metrolink train crash that killed 25 people was text messaging, an investigation also turned up marijuana in the conductor’s bloodstream. Residues of the drug have also been found in the bodies of other crash and accident victims as well. I know I wouldn’t want a dentist working on me who was stoned or a customer service rep, though I am sure it’s already gone down.

Earl and Rob may point to the “if you can’t beat them then join them” philosophy or say that people are going to do it anyway so you might as well let them, but that would be like saying that looting should be legalized during a riot because everyone in some neighborhoods is going to do that, too.

The only time cannabis should be legalized is for medicinal purposes. Other than that, we should hold a giant bonfire and burn the stuff.