Monday, August 15, 2011

WRITER'S BLOG

All my friends that aspire to keep their communities entertained with their ramblings have it. I know. Because I know these people and I know they have a tremendous amount to contribute. I suppose most are just not as narcissistic as me - and don't necessarily believe the entire universe is in dire need of their daily update. That's not to say my missives are "Oh, hey I just had a PB&J sammitch, now I'm off to the loo..."

Assumptions. Apparently the mother of all fuck ups. I was also always under the impression that PB&J stood for Peanut Butter & Jelly. As it turns out it's something significantly more interesting.

So. It's Monday. That's usually what happens after a weekend. Buggery.

Well,the weekend (baby) was actually chock full of adventure ad laughter and happiness and sadness and, you guessed it, a reasonably moderate quantity of booze.

Friday was awesome. Was taken to The Artscape for the Comedy Festival. The headliner for the evening was the impressionisto, Pablo Francisco. Talk about a rapid fire delivery of one liners and amazing impressions. This guy, for those of you who don't know, can do eighteen different impressions and whatnot in, like, 6 seconds. You actually really have to pay attention. To what he's doing and to not pee yourself.

The best part for me was that our local talent was so good. To be perfectly honest I thought Loyiso Gola and the other guy (sorry, forgot his name) were even better than the imports. Possibly because their content was more relevant. Either way - awesome evening. Thanks to the wonderful Sheik Yerbouti for taking me.

Saturday morning started off with me scooting on over to "BandFratHaus" to do an emergency plumbing job, as the night before, the magic fingers of THE Ryan Higgo somehow contrived to break shit.

[*I never use real names, but in this case the name has taken on a myth and mysticism of biblical proportions, thereby lending unto itself a natural sense of awe and reverence. I will not refer to it on Fridays.]

Then off to the cosy little home studio for 12 straight hours of rehearsal and recording. The braaing was done by the most qualified of the current triumvirate comprising AXXON. I believe somewhere along the line it was decided that we should only refer to each other by our general actions or outstanding ability or the like. I have since come up with 'The Whore, The Cook and The Mother", but then realised that we now have another member, public announcement pending...

As was so aptly illustrated, Sunday was a badger wrangling fiasco. Fuckers were everywhere in the kitchen stuck to all manner of surface, be it by means of spilled brandy, coke or braai marinade. Operation "chuck everything in the magic cupboard and press the button" was a great success approximately 115 minutes later.

Which brings us to the glorious day we're currently experiencing. Not too shabby, eh Nige!

For those of you in foreign climes, a short weather report for The Cape Of Storms on this disquieting winter day. It's about 21C, no wind, clear blue skies and the view from the top of the Atlantic Seaboard is nothing short of magnificent. Even when I put the mirror down...

So. Gearing up for the week ahead then. Lots of playing music. Deadlines are starting to loom. More on that exciting news later. The exalted return to football and perhaps even a light prance up the mountain with Commander Conker. I'll play it by ear. Oh, and it's my turn to startle everyone with my culinary concoctions on Thursday. I think. Members of Dinner Club beware! And pack in your Aromat / Mr Delivery brochure.

MEGA MOANDAY insert:

Why is it that people find it sooooo impossible to apply just the merest hint of common sense or objectivity when it comes to their feelings of unjust action visited upon their ever so virtuous selves? *See story of log in eye.

Why do seemingly intelligent people still think there is such a thing as a free lunch? If you want an iPad that fucking badly, go and buy one. *See story of "Let them eat cake".

Why can't you have your cake and eat it? Isn't that the point of having cake in the first place? It's a stupid saying. *See story of bread buttered on both sides. No, not the one starring Jenna Jameson...

Onward and upward then, even if there is still a tinge of the aforementioned sadness.

NGDG: "My genius at hiding important documents in secret places is rivalled only by the unlikelihood of my ever finding those places ever again."