Mummy DJ

Thursday, 15 November 2012

I often observe myself and consider my thoughts and behaviour totally irrational. It is completely out of my control, I can't stop myself from acting this way, so I just get on with it, like a total neurotic nut-case, sweeping through the crazy disorder!

Yesterday evening I found myself getting irrationally stressed out about going Christmas shopping with my little sister, how stupid does that seem? We planned to travel 40 miles to Belfast and my crazy mind built it up to be a journey so long and tough that it would rival crossing the Sahara! I could not force the reasoning into my brain that this is not that far, before I was off on maternity leave it was my daily commute!

Why it was stressing me out baffles me! Was it because it will be the longest ever journey my 12 week old baby has ever been on in the car? Was it because by the time we travel to and from Belfast she will have been in her car-seat for over the recommended limit of time a child should spend in it in a day? Was it because it was the first long car journey I would be taking my toddler on since she has been out of nappies for a month? Yes, all of the above stressed me out! However the realities of the day involved much more bedlam than I could ever have imagined.....

Having packed the changing bag I made what felt like a totally overwhelming decision of which car to take today, (thought process including: which car was bigger, which car was easier on fuel, which car had nursery rhyme music in it and which car did I have my sunglasses in!) I decided on my hubby's car, mainly because the double buggy was already in the boot of the car!

After breakfast I had the brainwave of taking the girls to mums and toddlers for an hour or so to wear them out a bit so they would sleep in the car- oh how clever I thought I was. Mums and tots turned into a nightmare with Brooke refusing to go to the toilet for the third hour in a row, stressing me to the max, and then torturing other mums (who were lovely and v understanding) to take her to the loo where she declared to them "can't go" and to top it all off she decided to pull herself up onto the adult seats by pulling on my arm which was holding a cup of tea that instantly flew everywhere AAAAHHHHH! Everywhere meaning all over MY top, belly legs and arm and a bit onto Brooke's sleeve. What a scene to cause. I panicked and rushed Brooke's arm under the cold tap and thankfully she had no harm done apart from a brown stain on her white Peppa jumper which she had a cry about. Me on the other hand am still a bit red 12 hours later!

Needless to say, me being me, my plan to tire Brooke out completely failed. No sleep in the car. Zoe wasn't that tired either and liked to play the game where she was silent when the car was moving and cried every time we stopped in traffic. This was great fun as we hit a mixture of grid-locked rush-hour traffic and what seemed like thousands of cars making their way to Disney on Ice. Just when Zoe peacefully dosed over, still stuck in a complete traffic jam, unable to move the car, my heart sank as Brooke shouts "Mummy mummy I've a sore belly I need to poo!" Me and my sister Grace just looked at each other with wide-eyed panic, there was nothing we could do, nowhere to turn as we heard a very loud 'motorbike' coming from the back seat followed my a horrible smell and Brooke saying "uh-oh!" I could have just cried at the thought of what was going to be in the back seat when I eventually got pulled over. Strangely Brooke wasn't upset though and about ten minutes later I got pulled over in the dark under a street light to examine the damage, but amazingly no harm done. I said Brooke "did you not poo?" she said "no just a motorbike mummy! Need to poo now need to poo now" In a panic I grabbed the potty I keep in the car, set it on the footpath, in the dark, under the streetlight, as traffic flooded past and sat Brooke on it where she smiled "Just another motorbike mummy!" and got up all pleased with herself!

I have never been so happy for a day's travels to be over and I have to mention my complete awe of a friend of mine who managed to travel from England to Northern Ireland with her baby when he was only 2 weeks old to be bridesmaid at her sister's wedding- I salute you! though I definitely think my fears of travelling are well-founded!

Sunday, 11 November 2012

This year I got into the spirit of fancy dress and bought my wee woman a lovely Minnie Mouse outfit from Mothercare. She loved it and, being totally impartial of coures, I thought she was totally adorable in it :) The only downside being that after her Nursery's Halloween party one day and then a mini Halloween party at home the following day, she wanted to wear it every day!

Not the easiest to explain to a two year old why she can't wear her "pretty Minnie dress" today! I have hidden it away for now, might get a Christmas outing or just remain parked until her baby sister is big enough for it! (I didn't dress up my 2 month old this year, she just slept through the fun! She will have her day too, soon enough no doubt!)

I have never really enjoyed fancy dress, probably because I am a total chicken, frightened by everything, including the dark, and I never wanted my babies to be scared of people in fancy dress either.

I also have never understood why people would want to make their children look terrifying and/or ugly on purpose at Halloween- hence my cute choice of Minnie dress above!

However, this year, under the influence of my little sis, who is a fancy dress fanatic, I went crazy and put on bunny ears lol!

All in all, we had fun, my little lady was grinning from ear to ear whilst dressed up which made it a big success in my eyes. Next year I will have to kit out my two little ladies for the festivities, joys!

Thursday, 8 November 2012

The dreaded winter bug hit our house last week and the aftermath is just about cleared away now and I am truely drained, more than I ever could have believed I could be!

Last Wednesday the bug crept up on my wee Brooke, the 2 year old getting used to using the potty/toilet. Stressing about how diarrhoea would set her back in this development, I was and still am amazed that it was the one thing that perfected her technique!! Out for lunch she insisted her auntie take her to the toilet and whilst waiting in obvious discomfort held it, refused a potty because "No way, need a toilet, it's too yucky!" And the toilet got it! And every time since that the "Yuck" needed to go in the toilet. So my advice for toilet training difficulties with Number 2s- diarrhoea is your friend!

From then on it has been vomitting and diarrhoea crazy times in my house :( I have changed so many sheets and used so many baby wipes that I nearly ran out of both! Nobody has had any energy, everone unhappy and gurning and to top it all off I took a horrendous spell of it myself on Monday with two children to look after at the same time I felt like I was dying!

My finest moment was when I had to sprint to the loo mid way through changing my baby after a poop explosion, clenching poor Zoe to my chest and dropping parts of her outfit onto the floor along the way, then on my way back to the sitting room I tripped over Brooke's potty which she had filled while I was away and soaking the kitchen tiles, AND to top it all off my little dog got all excited and tried to lick it up! It has truely been a disgusting time, which scented candles have been a god-send to get me through!

Just about getting back to myself this morning, but still very tired my friend was texting me from a corporate event. I could picture her, ever the glamazon, fitted outfit, immaculately turned out, networking away and the contrast was shocking as I lay slouched across the sofa, watching Mickey Mouse, in my dressing gown, 'milking' myself! I think she had a good laugh at the image of this too!

I am determined that I will pull myself out of this slump, the bug will not destroy me, I shall wear make-up again! It has been a tough time, BUT the pros are- Brooke is amazing with the toilet now and I am bound to have shifted a reasonable amount of baby-weight! :)

Saturday, 27 October 2012

Potty training- I dreaded it, I knew it had to be done and I embraced it with bucket loads of enthausiasm just over a week ago. I feel exhausted but it has been brilliant, my wee Brooke has been a little star mastering the overall art of it all on the third day. Nevertheless, there have been some comedic moments along the way which are too good not to share!

My favourite was when Brooke spent an entire afternoon struggling with her number two's, jumping on and off the potty gurning "I can't do poo-poo, it's too yucky!" She was uncomfortable and irritable and with my other little baby needing attention too I had a breakdown- I sat on the floor and started to cry. Poor Brooke was shocked and concerned as I creid "I just want you to do a poo." The little trooper then pulled down her leggings and pants, sat on the potty and started to push her hardest and said in her wee voice "Brooke's doing a poo-poo on the potty to stop mummy crying" AND SHE DID! After she finished she hugged me, wiped my cheeks and said "It's ok mummy, stop crying, Brooke did a poo!" I couldn't stop laughing at the wee pet as we rang her granny to tell her all about it! If I had realised my tears were so powerful I would have used this tactic sooner!

Also amazingly hilarious about the whole thing was how my little lady's rear end supposedly had become so sensitive. After months of landing full whack on it from carrying on, sitting on all sorts of awkward things she shouldn't have, including the family pets, suddenly Brooke was very fussy about what she sat on. The cheap potty was "too sore" the fancier potty was "too big" the toilet seat supplement was "big and sore." It was all her ploy to get a game of chase started as she sprinted between all toileting options around the house cackling away in joy, driving me mad!

On our first trip out to mum's and toddlers a week into training, I was entertained by how in total awe Brooke was of our Church hall and its wide variety of toilets and potties available. I spent the whole two hour session running in and out after her claiming she needed to pee just so she could take turns of sitting on every throne in the building! I soon stopped being entertained as I sweated through the session, so grateful of a good friend nursing my tiny Zoe to allow my wild goose chase, as other mums got a laugh at me and Brooke!

So potty training is going reasonably well so far with plenty of laughter and tears along the way! Anyone else having potty training drama too?

Friday, 26 October 2012

My name is Diane Forsythe and I have decided to begin a blog about my crazy experiences and jugglings as a busy mum and my many adventures with my two daughters. This is my first time ever blogging, so a total novice, learning as I go, I hope I enjoy it as much as I have been led to believe I will!

I am employed as an accountant but currently am off on maternity leave. My husband and I celebrated the birth of our lovely daughter Zoe, nine weeks ago; we also have an older daughter, Brooke who has just turned two. My hubby works full-time and is a bit obsessed with cars, both real ones and those on his X-Box! So I spend most of my days and evenings engrossed in all sorts of mummy things, looking after our miniature Yorkshire Terrier, Ben, whilst juggling housework and keeping the wheels turning in our home!

Like most "honest" mums, my life since becoming a parent is more often than not, chaotic, dramatic, operates at extremely high volume and is definitely messy but most importantly it is the best fun and most rewarding thing I’ve ever done in my life and I would not swap my life with any one. I believe that by sharing the journey online other mums can take comfort in knowing that there are others who feel as bad as they do some days and that we are not all perfect, as I have taken comfort in others' blogs as I originally embarked on motherhood!

I hope you enjoy reading about my family, my love of all things quirky and many other completely unrelated things! My blog is honest, I hope funny and a real portrayal of the dilemma’s I think we all face as mums in trying to bring up our kids to the best of our ability.