Lunch Bunch solves a woman's most unspoken problem: Boredom

Sunday

Apr 30, 2017 at 2:01 AM

Tiffanie DiDonato

In the small fishing village of Sneads Ferry, Ruth Ann Bland grew weary by the tedious repetition of waking up every morning and just staring out into her back yard. In her view, the boats iced up for their venture out onto the water. Routinely, with a pad of paper and pencil in hand, she’d mark down when they left and when they returned. With her binoculars she’d watch the clammers count their bags, the shrimpers, and the crabbers go out and collect their crab pots. And for two weeks, Bland waited for a white crane to simply just move.

“I kept asking myself, OK, when are you leaving?” She described while laughing. “Then behind my back, when I got up to get a cup of coffee for five minutes, he finally did.” Though something beautiful to witness every morning, it was as good as it got, Bland admitted.

Eventually, Bland wanted what the tide could not bring in: Great conversation.

So, on a whim, she posted on a closed local group Facebook page that she was, literally, going out to lunch. And she wanted company. The response was something out of a Neapolitan Novel, by Elena Ferrante.

Fisherman wives waiting for their husband’s to return from the job, military wives of all branches, retired women, and widows (like Bland) all exited their homes to join. Each woman searching for the same thing Bland was — Friendship.

Within a matter of a day, The Sneads Ferry Lunch Bunch was up and, well, dinning 38 members strong.

A resident of Onslow County since 1981, but a Sneads Ferry resident only since last June, Bland says creating the Lunch Bunch was not about quenching loneliness. In fact, she’s never been truly alone at all. Rather, the lunch bunch was about creating a solution to a problem so many women too often get criticized for having — boredom.

“Sometimes you just want to get away and do something on your own,” Bland said. For 17 years, she worked for Omega World Travel on Camp Johnson and was the manager in the office overseeing airline ticketing for the government. Leisure travel and new duty station tickets — Bland prepared them all for our service members. Today, she’s ready to ring in her 70th birthday and is absolutely adamant about not, “drifting away” inside her home.

“At the senior center, there wasn't much. At the community center, there wasn't much. There just wasn’t much,” she stated. “And the older you get the harder it is to get out and meet new people. I don't want to sit and dwell on aches and pains. I want to get out and do stuff! I want to meet my community! This (the lunch bunch) is a reason to get out of the house. I think every community should have something like this.”

Bland and the Lunch Bunch crew meet every 3rd Thursday of the month at 12:30 p.m. The destination, though, varies.

The first luncheon date was in March and the bunch met at The Baked Pizza Company on N.C. 172. The entire bill was sponsored by Cut Rite Tree Care. Their second meeting, the Riverview Cafe located downtown Sneads Ferry.

“While we were eating and chatting, I noticed a women come in to pick up take out. She was alone and come to find out, her husband just had a stroke. I handed her a business card I had made up for the Lunch Bunch, and she’s been a member ever since,” Bland recalled.

For their third Lunch Bunch, the ladies will meet at Chadwick Shores on May 18. It will be a bag lunch with picnic vibes. Deciding where to dine, Bland said, is always a group effort. Not a single local restaurant is off limits. Not even the chains. Hardee’s, sure. Taco Bell? Sound good! These places are capable of fostering great interactions, too.

And that friendly conversation Bland originally yearned for? It’s just as active as their new Sneads Ferry Lunch Bunch Facebook site. Everything from family, cooking, grandkids, careers, and kids is welcomed as a topic of conversation. Speaking of, Bland welcomes mothers to actually bring their children with them.

And why not, Bland asks?

“Mothers shouldn’t be stuck in the house with their kids, either. Husbands are welcome, too. But, they won’t have fun. And they more than likely won’t talk. Let’s be honest,” Bland joked.

In the future, Bland hopes to book an entire banquette room of women, eating and sharing in wonderful friendly conversation. There’s even talk about joining women in their own home for lunch. Say, for the bored, frustrated cook or woman who adores to entertain for multiples. She’s out there, too, Bland promised. She’s out there, just staring at the water, counting boats, and waiting for a crane to move out of her way.