Welcome to my fictional blog!
Jessica is a 24 year old kindergarten teacher, who just moved to Connecticut and is trying to find her away. Unfortunately along that journey she finds herself in the position of a mistress...

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Heartbreak with a side of the hangover blues.

I woke up the next morning with a pounding head ache. I
squinted over at the clock on my night stand. 7:23. I should have known that
drinking a bottle (or three) of wine accompanied by a few shots last night
would have me waking up hurting. Why was it so bright in my room? Ugh.

After leaving Andrews around 3:30, I sat in the front seat
of my car and cried it out until about 4, then headed right to heaven on earth.
Aka the strip mall near my house where the liquor store neighbored the pizza
shop. I ordered a small pepperoni extra cheese pizza then headed next door and
bought three bottles of wine while I waited for it to be cooked. After all was
said and done, I climbed back into my car with my dates for the night and
headed home. The pizza and wine then accompanied me on my couch for a binge
night with a rerun marathon of Say Yes to The Dress episodes. Around 6pm, I
texted Maureen that I wasn’t going to be able to come into work the following
morning, which I know was immature of me but I hadn’t taken a day off since I
started working there and I needed a me night turned into a me day badly after
everything that went down in the last 48 hours. After that I left my phone on
quiet up in my bed and took two bottles of wine to the face, hard, and ate one
slice of pizza more than I would like to admit. Needless to say, whatever
happened after that was a blur and now I was feeling the repercussions of my
mini break down night--all over my body.

I searched my bed, hitting my blankets all around me until I
felt my phone in my hand, I opened my eyes squinting down at it and found four
missed calls and a bunch of texts. I scrolled through them, 2 from my dad,
oops; 3 from Andrew, EW; and 1 from Lauren.

I opened the texts shortly after. Rolling onto my stomach to
get more comfortable I began looking through them. Holy shit. I don’t know if I
was more surprised that ten of the messages were from Andrew, or that during my
drunken stupor I didn’t answer him. I decided to skip over those and look at
the rest then deal with that fuckery after. I opened the group message from the
girls, laughing at the pictures I sent them in my drunken pizza splurge. Then
opened the text from my dad and smiled immediately, reading over the few
messages from him, letting me know him along with my two brothers, Jake and
Joey, and my niece, Joe’s daughter, Michaela, would be visiting me on Friday
for the weekend. I frowned a little thinking about how long it’s been since
I’ve seen them. A family weekend sounded like the most perfect way to end what
I know was going to be a hectic upcoming week.

I closed my eyes, sighing a little then pulled myself up and
out of bed, padding through the house and letting Daisy outside. I settled down
on my couch, which unfortunately instantly reminded me of Andrew and the little
surprise I found just a short while ago. I laid back and unlocked my phone then
opened my inbox. Starring at Andrew’s name, with a blue bold little dot next to
it in my phone, indicated unread messages. I ran my thumb over the screen, not
pressing hard enough to open the messages, wondering whether I should just
delete them or take the time and read through them. I decided on the later,
knowing if I deleted them I would go crazy all day wondering what they said. The
instant butterflies in my stomach made me regret opening them. My mind reeling
with thoughts as I read each message one by one.

Andrew: You’re so
pretty when you’re mad.

Arrogant son of a
bitch.

Andrew: Jess…please
let me explain.

What was there to
explain?

Andrew: I’ve been
worried about you all night, please just let me know you got home alright. I
know you were probably really upset while you were driving.

Oh, so now you want to be a decent guy?

Andrew: Please….

Begging now are we?

Andrew: I know I
don’t deserve your time but please don’t shut me out without at least hearing
my side of things. I was going to tell you. This is not how I planned on things
working out.

I want to hear your
side so badly. I want to forgive you, but I know I shouldn’t.

Andrew: I knew I
shouldn’t even have hung out with you. I know even that was crossing a
boundary. I knew from the moment I saw you that you weren’t going to be an easy
girl to get out of my head and from the first time we hung out I was sure of
it. I know I shouldn’t have showed up at your house that night, but there was
nowhere else I could even think about wanting to be.

And here come the
tears. At least I know he felt strongly quickly like I had.

Andrew: There’s no
words to even explain how poorly I feel about all of this. Even after it all, I
can’t get you out of my mind.

Andrew:I hope you are safe. Please don’t let this be
the end. You already kissed me. It not like things could get worse from here….

I guess we was true in
that. I was already in a way “the other girl.” He had already cheated on his
wife with me, and nothing was going to change that fact. So would letting it
continue on even be any more bad? The harm and damage was already done, wasn’t
it?

I hated myself for even trying to justify all of this and
make it okay.

I wiped the tears from my face, last night’s mascara
streaking across my hand. I was glad that I hadn’t texted him back and was just
dealing with this problem alone. I didn’t know what I was going to do about the
whole situation, but I definitely needed to figure it out on my own before
seeing Andrew again, or I know my decision will swing one way, and I’m not sure
if I’m mentally prepared to be the other girl just yet.

8 comments:

If things are going to work out for Jess & Andrew... I hope he does the right thing and leave his wife. I can only imagine the situation being difficult for all parties involved, but it makes for great drama and reading. :)

It's rude to make your readers wait this long without an update. I'm about to forget this blog since you don't have a schedule and its been a week and a half since the last blog. The least you can do is tell us, your readers why you haven't posted and when the next time will be.

you're the rude one posting stuff like this. Sorry everyone can't revolve around your schedule. Wouldn't you rather her wait and post her best work then rush and post something that won't even interest you. You know not everyone sits around doing nothing all day. There is such thing as school and work.