Rebecca Rose

Newly engaged couple Marian and Elliot are your new best friends. But I already have best friends, you say, daring to protest my declaration. Nope, fire them forever, because these two are the clear winners.

Getting tired of doing so much eye-rolling at those cheesy couples engagement photos that flood everyone's Facebook feed, Marian and Elliot decided to try something a little different when they got engaged and the results are pretty damn funny.

Blogger and marketing manager Marian said the couple had no initial plans to even do engagement photos. But in their wedding research, they began to notice a consistency in some of the types of photos they saw. Marian said she saw basically three types of photos over and over, "1.Woman looking daintily up at her intended while he looks broodingly into the distance, 2.Couple holding hands in an awkward position so the shiny bling was obviously front and center and 3.Couple kissing on the beach with pre-wife lifting one leg and pointing her toes."

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Time for an interjection here—about that couple-kissing-on-the-beach-pre-wife-lifting-one-leg photo. LITERALLY every married couple I know has a picture of themselves like that. What does that picture exactly say about us, as loving coupled up persons? "Oh we are so in love, I cannot even keep my goddamn foot down here on the ground!"

The repetition of images gave them an idea. They asked their friend to photograph them in some of the similar poses we are all used to seeing engaged couples doing, but flipped the typical gender roles seen in such photos. Marian then shared her story and photos to Offbeat Bride, which BTW is now my favorite blog ever:

So, as a joke, we started talking about doing spoofs of these photos —
some gender-swapped (how would Elliot look with his leg cocked while
kissing me?), others just extreme takes on traditional photos (what if,
instead of leading me gently down a grassy meadow path, Elliot was
snapped dragging my body into the woods?).

Elliot and I started a Google doc for fun, highlighting our most ridiculous ideas. When my dear friend, Malia,
saw the list, she insisted on taking the photos. She'd been a wedding
and engagement photographer for 10 years and said she was tired of the
familiar poses. So as our wedding gift, Malia followed us around San
Francisco while we acted like idiots and Elliot posed as a traditional
blushing bride. I don't think anyone has ever had more fun…

The results are basically hilarious and completely adorable, as you can see.

I like the inspiration photo. It says "My man will carry me on the beach so my feet won't get wet. Because I am the kind of asshole who goes to the beach and complains about their feet getting wet."

Again, the inspiration is amazing. HE IS FUCKING HEADLESS, Y'ALL. And apparently, it's a thing. That photo says "I love my betrothed so goddamn much, I cut his head off. Seriously. I have it in a jar in my basement. Now I know he will never, ever leave meeeeeeee...."

"UGH stupid man who took out a second mortgage on his condo to buy me this ring UGH. MOVE so my friends on Instagram can see this ring."