Obviously, this petition isn’t really going to get anywhere. The White House watches these things like a hawk, and takes down frivolous ones with SEC speed. It would almost be an upset if the page is still up by the time we publish this story. If they do leave it up, though, it’ll almost definitely surpass 100,000 signatures before getting a measured declining response from the President.

You can’t just make up national holidays on one month’s notice, and in my experience opening day is usually cold and dreary anyways; stumping for Super Bowl Monday is a much more noble and realistic endeavor.