August 13, 2006

Busy, busy, busy

Did you see me at the hemp fashion show we put on outside City Hall? That was so cool. Sustainable Dockers, people -- it's our future!

I needed a break after that day. I had met Homer over at Higgins for lunch, and he was all upset about how his new park looks down in SoWa. Very animated -- that lttle vein on his forehead was throbbing, and he was ranting about how Sharon Kitzhaber wouldn't even take her poodle down to take a cr*p on that pathetic grass we planted. I told him we're strapped for cash right now, but he kept saying that wasn't the deal he made with Mommy before she got sick. He keeps threatening to show those photos he has.

Then he started in on the affordable housing stuff. How he doesn't want a bunch of welfare mothers hanging around the neighborhood, and we had damn well better not be spending his landscaping money building them apartments. I told him they could all be cleaning ladies for the condos, but he wasn't buying it.

I'm really tired of dealing with these guys, but once you sign up with them, there's no getting out.

Hey, enough about that. I've got a great photo opportunity coming up tomorrow. There's a guy up in NoPo who's fixing his broken sidewalk using expired Gardenburgers. You know I'm going to get a piece of that one.

August 11, 2006

Change of venue

Jeez, I never thought there would come a time to crank this blog back up again. Ever since Cruella left, there hasn't been all that much to post about. But like they used to sing in that song by those hippie black dudes, "Time Has Come Today." (I still sing that one in the john -- the end part, at least.)

Now, don't get me wrong, I was getting pretty good play over on that BlueOregon thing, but it's gotten to be a little too "inside" over there, if you know what I mean. How many people are going to read your posts when they're surrounded by stuff like "BREAKING: Gordon Smith Isn't Flossing"? They get a lot of traffic, but I swear half of it is the guys in the club checking in to look at their own names.

And man, things are heating up. It's been crazy around the office the last couple of days. The whole terror thing's got everybody a little on edge. T. is having his office swept for bugs three times a day, and yesterday E. hit the panic button when the cleaning lady came in and pointed a spray bottle of Formula 409 at his terrarium.

I haven't seen much of D. lately. For a couple of weeks after he won the election, every time I saw him in the hall he'd have that stoned-out look he has and say, "Summer of love, man." Then he took off. They say somebody saw him on the bumper cars at Seaside, riding around by himself and scaring little kids.

Oh, man, look at the time. I've got to get on the damn bike and pedal in to the shop again. What a pain in the ass, literally -- but Wiener says it's worth 10,000 votes. He says I'm gonna need every one I can get when those photos come out of me shopping at Wal-Mart. Hey, I was on vacation, all right?