Saturday, December 12, 2009

Even Simple Tasks Are Hard

I am completely frustrated right now! I should have known better. Simple normal tasks are so hard for us sometimes. Tonight we tried to put up the Christmas tree, decorate it, and make peanut butter balls as a family. Well, Todd got the tree up after 5 hours of trying to fix the lights on it! That was fun! Not! Well, while I ran to the store to get the ingredients for the PB balls, McKenzie had some kind of meltdown. Wasn't here so not sure what went down. I am sure I will get the run down tonight when we go to bed. Anyway, Kenz has been on edge today and has had two angry episodes. She has been upset with everything especially anything her sister does. The whole time we were making the PB balls she had a high pitched angry voice at her sister about every little move her sister made. She is so demanding and gets upset if Tori doesn't listen to exactly what she says to do. When I intervene she gets angry at me and is completely disrespectful. Tori cries at every little thing these days so that just makes it worse. I know her patience is running low too. Anyway, by the end of it I had had it, and I lost my temper and yelled! I know better. It doesn't help the situation. It makes it worse, but I have to give myself grace and know that God forgives me. And hopefully, the next time I will rely on His spirit and keep calm. It just makes me so sad that we can't enjoy simple things that most families do. She just started the new med. last night and I am not sure it will fly. She was extremely tired this morning and had a headache all day. And now she is refusing to take it tonight. These disorders are so unfair.

3 comments:

Hi Amy! I am sorry I was incognito for a week or so. If you read my blog, you will see why! I did not see a difference with the intuniv until we got to week 3 with a 3mg dose. We went up to 4 then dropped down, but I think we are going back up again. She does really well on 4mg.

Yes, Caroline was incredibly verbally abusive when unstable. There were times I felt like I hated her. If she is stable, she is actually sweet. But if she is off, watch out! As far as handling , it is so hard. We can't stop telling them that it is sin to treat a parent like that, but honestly, not much will change, they really can't change, until the meds are fixed! I know how discouraging it is to feel like you are trying to raise a child to follow Christ, and it seems like their behavior is outside of the power of the Holy Spirit. But, remember that they have a true chemical/physical disorder that makes "good" behavior actually nigh impossible if they are unbalanced. God understands, forgives, and has much grace for these kids. They need to know that God has tremendous grace for them, or they will just lose faith. You are doing a great job, Amy! Have a blessed Christmas!!!

Amy...I have two kids with ADHD and they were just put on Intuniv. The first couple of days are the hardest. my daughter, Siri, stayed home from school the 3rd day she was on the 3 mg, but has settled into herself at this point. She had terrible headaches. I called her doctor and she said that the first month is the hardest. My son is on 3 mg as well and I don't notice a difference in his explosiveness. We are hoping that this is going to work for him, we are putting all of our eggs in this basket. I don't think that he can go up to 4 mg because of his weight.

McKenzie had a headache too the first day she was on 1 mg. We are on the third day of 2mg. Still no change and no obvious side effects. We are still trying to figure out if she is just ADHD with anxiety or bipolar, ADHD, and anxiety. We are still trying to find a good psychiatrist here. Megan, thank you for your encouraging words.

About Me

I am a wife of a wonderful man and a mother of three beautiful girls, McKenzie-13, Tori-8, and Addyson-1. Yes, they are spread out-this was God's plan not ours exactly. But we feel very blessed. God has given us a daughter who deals with different types of mental illness. This would be McKenzie, our oldest. She has just hit the most challenging teenage years and her mental illness still has not been figured out completely. We have been on a journey to get her help and to never give up until we do. This blog is my way of sharing our story, our ups and downs, and our hopes and dreams. My hope is that if you have someone close to you who is struggling with mental illness that this blog may be encouraging and supporting to you. Thank you for reading.