Where Stuff Gets Rated

Tag: snacks

These are Rice Krispie treats covered in chocolate where every ingredient is the lowest quality version of itself. These shouldn’t be good, and they aren’t, but they manage to be slightly more addictive than heroin-covered Pringles. 3.9/5

These are low rent Twix bars. They’re definitely not as good as Twix, but they’re bigger and you get eight of them for a buck and a quarter. I don’t think you’re even allowed to think about Twix for a buck and a quarter. 4.1/5

These are banana flavored spongecake with snack cake filling. Essentially they’re banana Twinkies nobody bothered to close so the filling squirts out of the sides. Banana spongecake is better than regular spongecake but snack cake filling on my face is a deal-breaker. I’m just going to give them whatever I gave Twinkies, which I’m not going to look up but I remember was low and that I suggested radioactive post-apocalypse cockroaches wouldn’t eat them. 0.3/5

These are not nuts, either. They’re something called a “drupe” with is a seed inside like four other seeds inside of what is essentially a gross peach. Eating one is like eating a tiny piece of wood. I like them. 3.5/5

This was a contest from 2008 where guessing the mystery flavor let you enter a contest where you had to do a bunch of nonsense and eventually somebody won $10,000. I imagine guessing the flavor was not the most important aspect since I just asked the Doritos distributor at Target what the flavor was and he told me. It was Mountain Dew. These were Mountain Dew-flavored Doritos. They were awful. Just awful. 0.1/5