Psychotherapist Warschaw ( Winning by Negotiation ) and Secunda ( By Youth Possessed ) present here detailed suggestions for bringing up children through approaches based on parental knowledge of their own and their offspring's temperaments. Questionnaires help readers to categorize themselves as jungle fighter, dictator, big daddy/mamma, etc.; the young as bully, saint, loner, or other types. Case histories demonstrate specific strategies to solve problems posed by children from infancy through the teens. Crises arising from sibling rivalry, school failures, rebellion, divorce, step-families, teenage sex and drug addiction are among the many situations that call for ``winning with kids'' through negotiation. Author tour. (September)