Rollo Ross2015-03-31T14:26:58-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/author/index.php?author=rollo-rossCopyright 2008, HuffingtonPost.com, Inc.HuffingtonPost Blogger Feed for Rollo RossGood old fashioned elbow grease.How to Grow a Film Festivaltag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.22332762012-12-05T19:00:00-05:002013-02-04T05:12:01-05:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
These included a disastrous visit to the Souk, where I had a snake thrown on my arm by a disgruntled local and a monkey placed on my head while trying to film general views of the city. I also remember the longest alcohol-free dinner known to man, sitting all alone at a table in a corner because I forgot my dinner jacket.

I remember feeling incredibly lonely. There were very few international press to hang around with and the festival felt very small - the red carpet at Le Palais des Congres seemed more like a doormat than a catwalk and to the naked eye it was difficult to tell that a film festival was actually taking place.

If memory serves me right, I seemed to spend more time during the day in my rather unappealing hotel room watching television I didn't understand than I did at the festival.

Cut to 2012, and I am quite frankly stunned by how much this North African festival has grown.

Now the red carpet is around the same size as Berlin's, the amount of official festival stands and offices are the same as Venice, the opening night party at the Taj Palace was as extravagant as Cannes and there's a very definite film festival buzz in the air.

As it happens, the festival's current artistic director Bruno Barde first visited the festival the same year as I did and he told me in his office he felt the same vibe back then.

"I came here the same time as you to Marrakech to see everything and after the festival I said to Melita (Toscan du Plantier, director of the festival) that this is not a real film festival. We have to organise things differently."

And organising things differently meant changing the date from the warm October to (the quite frankly chilly) December, and focusing on the films and the directors rather than enrolling A-list glamour - something most up-and-coming film festivals wouldn't dare to do for fear of no press coverage.

"I think that now in this world where things are completely lazy and easy and where we believe that celebrities and the talent are the same thing, here we never do that. We are very demanding - very demanding."

"I think that the story of cinema is the story of the director. It's like a painter. I don't care who he paints - I'm interested in Leonardo Da Vinci!"

The programme this year reflects that. It's governed by a focus on 'talent' with master classes by Darren Aronofsky and Jonathan Demme and homage evenings to the likes of Zhang Yimou, Isabelle Huppert, and Karim Abouobayd.

The glamour of the festival comes in the voluptuous figures of Gemma Arterton and Monica Bellucci but for once these designer clad actresses are not the highlight. That honour (to date) went to the 'Homage to Hindi Cinema' which saw the locals descend into an almost ecstatic state at the sight of Indian megastars Amitabh Bachchan and Shahrukh Khan.

Both held open air screenings of their classic Hindi films in the Djemaa El Fna square outside the Souq.

And I realised while watching Shah Rukh Khan showboating on a barrier in front of thousands of beaming faces, and then sprinting away from his security to meet his cheering fans that the locals are what have made this festival have its buzz - not just the ones at the outdoor screenings but the others helping out around the festival who say 'Bonjour' every time you pass them.

Bruno explained that "if the people couldn't come to the cinema we had to meet the people where they are and because of this, nine years ago I said ok, we have to show everything in public.

"We went from an international festival to which the Moroccan people could participate to an international film festival made by Moroccan people for the Moroccan people. All the things you see are made by the local people - the sets, the red carpet, everything and it's very important because we are creating jobs."

And, according to Barde, the festival has also had a major impact on the local film industry.

"In the past few years, they've produced a lot of films and made good films. We've had Moroccan films that have done well in Berlin, in Venice, in Cannes but the biggest change is that the Moroccan people are now proud of this festival and proud to welcome these film makers."

I have to say that all these changes have certainly revolutionised the Marrakech Film Festival experience, and it's gone from a dismal environment to a joyous one. If it continues to go forward in this direction, it shouldn't be too long before it's as celebrated as its established European counterparts.

On a personal level, this year I haven't felt lonely at all. You seem to get a lot of respect from the locals by wearing your festival badge so I've had no encounters with monkeys or snakes.

And I've spent much less time in my rather unappealing hotel room in which - I'm proud to say - I haven't watched any television I didn't understand.]]>Yes, the London Film Festival Has Begun...tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.19569902012-10-11T19:00:00-04:002013-02-18T06:51:39-05:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/is happening and it's happening right now.

I'm not sure if this is a lack of marketing - I've only seen posters on the tube - or just the typical British stance in the press not to champion things we do well. Whereas France, Germany and Italy will show a patriotic amount of coverage in their newspapers for the opening night of Cannes, Berlin and Venice, I feel our own press do a bit of a 'meh'.

But the London Film Festival really should be celebrated for its uniqueness.

Most film festivals are where films come alive or die a grisly death. Under the chilly skies of Sundance and Berlin, and behind the glamour of Cannes and Venice, there are journalists and subsequently buyers deciding the fate of productions, which sometimes have been years in the making. It's a cruel environment, but it's necessary to sort the wheat from the chaff.

London isn't cruel. It's what I would call 'Now That's What I Call Film Festivals' (although I'm probably showing my age there!) as it picks all the gems from the other festivals and puts them all in a nice tidy selection. So there's no breaking of hearts here - just a whole load of good films that generally don't have the budgets of small European countries.

These include those movies that were overlooked by the press and buyers at the more exclusive film festivals because their debut screenings clashed with the new Tarantino film or a swanky drinks party so the buyers and press didn't attend. In other words, you've probably never heard of them. But the London Film Festival and the BFI are getting behind them.

London is usually known in the film industry as the Hollywood capital of Europe as all the big studios have their European headquarters here. Our multiplexes are full of American movies and we generally hold the European premieres of big blockbusters in London (and there's normally a lot of media coverage about them!).

But for two weeks, we're kicking back at our commercial reputation by hosting a celebration of non-formulaic movies and that, in my eyes, is worth celebrating.

Most importantly, it's a film festival aimed at the public so even you can get tickets. This isn't a Cannes where getting accreditation is like applying for Oxbridge. This is something everyone can join in on.

In case you need some tips, some of the highlights from just scanning through the long list of over 200 films are Amour by Michael Haneke, A Hijacking (which will go down a storm with Borgen fans), Thomas Vinterberg's The Hunt, the Cannes crowd-pleasing The Sapphires and the simply titled No, which stars Gael Garcia Bernal.

And if you want to enter the Oscars discussion, you should probably check out Argo by Ben Affleck, the police drama End of Watch and the absolutely heart-melting sex therapy movie The Sessions. And don't miss out on the black and white 3D animation Frankenweenie which opened the film festival last night and is probably Tim Burton's most seminal work.

Or if it's a cultural experience you're craving, there's always Wadjda, the first Saudi Arabian film by a female director. That is no small feat.

It's possible that the tickets to these films have already been bought by those people out there who seem to know about everything (you know who you are!), but don't fret.

There are always reserve tickets for the popular screenings (probably set aside for our truant national press so you're in with a chance there!) or you can always just take a gamble on anything available and I guarantee it's going to be a cinematic experience you don't often get in this country.

]]>Connecting with Disconnecttag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18578162012-09-05T11:26:26-04:002013-02-18T06:48:22-05:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
I really want to because I have fallen in love with a movie here at the Venice film festival but it is quite difficult to focus.

Oh. Hang on. I'm just going to retweet something that says the only thing wrong with this movie is it's not in the festival's competition.

But yeah, there's this film called "Disconnect" and it got a 10-minute standing ovation at its world premiere here, and it is so well deserved. It's lean, strong and packs a punch.

It follows three interweaving stories of people whose lives are affected in one way or the other by a fascination with the internet and who each need to get more in touch with the people around them rather than just interfacing with the world wide web.

There's a TV news reporter (played brilliantly by an almost unrecognizable Andrea Riseborough), a live porn artist, a bullied emo kid and his family, a cyber detective, and finally a grieving couple who discover they're victims of internet fraud.

While I check my gmail, I'll let its director Henry Alex-Rubin (who I'm having lunch with on the Excelsior terrace) tell you about the film:-

"Well I suppose, thematically the film is about loneliness. Everyone has experienced loneliness and technology is a tool which medicates loneliness and I think all these characters are in search of something and they don't want to be so alone and want to feel connected. "

"The movie is an exploration of technology like any tool that can bring people together and separate them too. And at the end of the movie everyone is physically together whereas at the beginning of the movie they are separated."

Alex-Rubin is an Oscar-nominated documentary maker and for this movie, he even cast a 'shadow cast' which were real life counterparts of the parts in the movie that the actors could relate to.

All the characters in the movie are naïve about the dangers of the internet - except one. Frank Grillo plays the cyber detective of "Disconnect" and his shadow cast member was the head of the Cyber division of the NYPD.

Sorry, Henry, I'm going to call him to discuss this. You just eat your sandwich or check your e-mails or whatever.

"He can't stress enough that the best resource to prevent hacking on your computer is a small piece of tape that you should always have over the little camera on your computer. You should always have that. I find that to be fascinating and 25,000 people a day get their identities stolen. Now that's a lot of people. And that's in the United States and not the world. And it's not that hard to do. Just think of all the information we give away. We give it away. It's scary."

I think this is the first time I've ever seen a movie that actually portrays our reliance on modern day technology as it really is.

I could tell you more but I need to put an on-line bet on who's going to win the Best Film at the Oscars.]]>Going for a Chinese in Venicetag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18538252012-09-04T08:46:47-04:002012-11-04T05:12:01-05:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
It's always a massive gamble, and often they don't succeed.

But this year, with Tai Chi 0 I think they're finally onto a winner with what I'd describe as the hyperactive lovechild of Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World and Kung Fu Hustle.

It's a typical superhero story with atypical story devices. There's a misfit child called Yang Luchan, born with an unsightly cyst on his forehead. But it's only when this cyst gets hit that his power surfaces - and his super-powered kung fu comes out.

However, like every superhero, this comes at a price. The more his cyst gets hit, and begins changing its pigment from pink to purple to black, the more likely he is to die a sudden death and the only way he can survive is to train himself in 'inner kung fu' to get his cyst back to the normal pink colour.

So he goes in search of a small village where the locals have their own secret type of kung fu, which they use on a daily basis, whether it be the tofu maker or the pig-tailed school kid. Despite being friendly enough, the villagers are forbidden from training up outsiders in their martial arts and will go to any lengths to protect their style.

But what makes this movie special is its style. It drastically changes from scene to scene with each sequence governed by a modern cultural influence from Street Fighter and Manga, to Google Maps and Steampunk.

One of the only consistencies is that the characters all remain cartoon-like in their uniform clothing.

This may sound like a mess, but it is an absolute romp.

The style and direction of the movie is the brainchild of Hong Kong born and German schooled Stephen Fung, who went on to study Graphic Design in the US, and is now a film director in China.

He's also been a confirmed gamer for his entire life, but it's the gaming element which he believes will give the film an international edge.

"When I was shooting this movie in this remote village in China, the kids they knew Angry Birds and I'm talking three to five years old here. Every time they heard an electronic squawk they'd run over and grab my phone and start playing with it. That's obviously a very Western invention and we're talking about kids from a place where the water ain't too clean and they know Angry Birds."

And he explained that behind all the post-production and zaniness of the piece, at the heart there is historical fact.

"Yang LuChan did try and learn Shunzi kung fu at this village and this village obviously didn't look like this - this is more like a Miyazaki type village in this movie - but he did try and visit this village to try and learn this style of kung fu and got beaten up three times trying to enter this village. After he learned this, he developed this kung fu into Yang-style kung fu which is the Tai Chi we see people doing today - very soft and gentle."

Tai Chi 0 is the first part of a trilogy, but I don't expect the next two parts will show any sign of calming down like the Kung Fu style.

]]>Venice Film Festival: To the Wonder of Malicktag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18505652012-09-03T19:00:00-04:002012-11-03T05:12:01-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
Several times in social situations, friends have started talking about his movies, and they'd often turn to me for my expert commentary on the director as a film festival expert but I wouldn't have any.

But last night, a funny thing happened. I was a friend's plus one to the Vanity Fair party over on mainland Venice (the film festival takes place on the beach island of The Lido).

Not unexpectedly, the room was awash with stunningly beautiful Italian women in equally stunning designer dresses, and then there were some Italian men too. Thrown in there were a few celebrities; Laetitia Casta, Samantha Morton and finally Zak Efron.

(Despite the fact that most of the Italians there didn't know who Zak was, his bodyguards at one point overzealously commandeered the only toilets at the party like it was a military exercise, advertising to everyone that the young hunk needed to relieve himself.)

Anyway, to say we felt out of place was an understatement, so we went hunting around the party for normal non-pretentious people. It took a while but eventually we came across two very down-to-earth American guys - one of which it transpired was an executive producer of "To The Wonder," the Terrence Malick film in competition at the festival.

To say he was nervous about the screening the next day was an understatement. He was smoking his cigarettes in one drag whilst continuously panicking about whether the film was going to get good reviews or not.

I told him it was obvious that the reviews were going to be mixed, as it was, after all, a Terrence Malick film - if there is one thing I know, you either love them or hate them.

This was reflected in the two press screenings of the morning, the first at 9am got a mixture of boos and claps, whereas the 11am sitting had a rapturous applause at the end.

I'd made it to the latter after making a vow to this producer that I would go and see it, so out went my plans to see the Susanne Bier movie and in came Malick.

Within the first five minutes, I could clearly see why this acclaimed director was like Marmite to the film world. It started with Bond girl Olga Kurylenko talking in French about the philosophy of love, whilst wandering and twirling (oh yes, she did a LOT of twirling in the film) alongside her boyfriend played by Ben Affleck.

The style and content of it reminded me of a feature length version of those perfume adverts which appear on mainstream television in the build-up to Christmas.

The story explored the ups and downs of this couple's relationship and whilst at first I was a bit befuddled by the sheer pretentiousness of it all, after around 70 minutes in I started to feel quite comfortable with the narrative and style - although for the life of me I still don't understand how Javier Bardem was involved in the story as a priest, although he did feature a lot.

When the film finally finished (it seemed about 10 minutes too long for me), I left the cinema but not the film as the wafty style of the movie stayed with me and I seemed to be seeing everything as if it were a Terrence Malick movie (although no-one was twirling, which was a bit of a disappointment.)

With my Malick camera eyes in full flow and my interest piqued, I was determined to find out more about this director, so I attended the film's press conference.

Sadly, Terrence didn't.

So it was up to the producers and Olga to try and answer the five minute questions posed at them by Italian journalists. (Over here, reporters appear to go by the adage - 'why use five words when you can use five hundred').

Unsurprisingly, I didn't learn much about Malick from that, except he forced Ben Affleck and Olga Kurylenko to read mighty classic Russian tomes for their roles, that he doesn't like dialogue (evident by Ben Affleck barely opening his mouth in the entire film), and that he isn't, contrary to reports, sitting at the festival in disguise.

But at least now I can say that I am no longer a Terrence Malick virgin. In fact, I'd now consider watching the Cannes winning "Tree of Life" - apparently, it has dinosaurs in it.]]>'The Reluctant Fundamentalist' Opens Venice (and People's Minds?)tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18460652012-08-31T08:13:10-04:002012-10-31T05:12:02-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
As usual, everything in the apartment is stuck in time - this time it's the Seventies - although there are some more modern features, like a stereo in the kitchen I remember having at school. There is the usual creepy kids toy which stares at you wherever you go and of course, there's no kettle. But at least this year there is running water, which is nice.

Anyway, I digress because the film festival here opened with The Reluctant Fundamentalist directed by Mira Nair ('which rhymes with fire' as she once told me) and starring Riz Ahmed, Liev Schreiber, Kiefer Sutherland and Kate Hudson.

The story's backbone is a clash of cultural perspectives between Pakistan and America. This is conveyed by a conversation in a student café in Lahore between two men, one an American journalist (Liev Schreiber), the other a supposed Al Qaeda sympathiser named Changez (Riz Ahmed).

The film is about 90% flashbacks. They unfold the life and times of Pakistani born Changez, as he graduates in America, becomes a big shot in Wall Street and falls in love. But soon after 9/11, his American dream ends and his Pakistani one begins and the film soon arrives back in the café in Lahore for its climax.

The story not just touches on but firmly addresses concepts of journalistic and business ethics, international politics and intervention, racism, education, common human morals, and, as the title suggests fundamentalism.

It has certainly changed my media-informed view of Pakistan and I'd now like to pay the country a visit.

However, the film's polarized arguments don't appear to have been discussed or even brought up in reviews despite that being the point of the film.

Perhaps it's not the critics' job to do so or maybe it's a fear about addressing or even touching on the film's numerous viewpoints. Or perhaps there are just too many issues to even start trying to unravel it.

Critics I've talked to simply say 'it was good,' 'it was excellent' or 'it was clichéd' (although I'm not sure how) and tend to focus on the film's technical prowess or the performances by the actors. However, reporting journalists have been less reticent on the ground and have been having good old chinwags about the issues, whether they liked the movie or not.

The day after its world premiere, I asked the charming Riz how he felt about the way it was received.

"Well there's a lot in it. I think it's inevitable different people take different things from it. Some bits will resonate with some people, other bits for other people. Hearing from journalists, they say 'well the film is about love,' 'well the film is about 9/11,' 'well the film is about Wall Street and what that does to the world' and I think that's really cool and I'm really excited by that."

Mira Nair did a little excited clap when I mentioned to her some of the different opinions.

"The biggest balancing act (of making the film) was to be balanced about the views and not sink into a stereotype myself. I knew it would be... I hoped it would be something that would instill dialogue or create dialogue in one way or another because I know it's not simple. We're not saying this is the one road. There is no one road. The only one road is that humanity is universal."

I feel this is one film you definitely shouldn't take any notice of reviews - just sit back and perceive it from your own unique perspective.]]>The Hidden Hero of Hollywoodtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.18297662012-08-26T19:00:00-04:002013-02-18T06:51:08-05:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
Often the director will get a brief cameo in the piece (unless it's an Almodovar, Tarantino, Woody Allen movie), and the producers and screenplay writers at these events will most definitely end up on the cutting room floor.

I've constantly bitched about how unfair this system of movie marketing is, or how unfair the media is as credit really isn't going where credit is due - to the directors, screenwriters and producers. But until I went to a presentation-cum-Q&A at the Aruba International Film Festival, I realised that there's a position that rarely gets any credit at all - they never get to walk the red carpet and yet they are the ones that truly make films magical.

They are the editors.

Pietro Scalia is one of this breed and one of the best. He's been nominated for four Oscars and won two, and was the 'sculptor' of such films as Gladiator, Black Hawk Down, Good Will Hunting and more recently The Amazing Spider-Man and Prometheus. And it was him who gave this presentation and who enthralled us with exactly what an editor contributes to a movie.

He explained how there are three versions of a script; the screenwriter's; the director's and finally the editor's - but it's the editor's vision that will be the film you actually get to see.

He proved this point by showing us the opening sequences of both JFK and Gladiator - neither of which matched the original screenplay or the director's vision but set the narrative off on its journey with the correct opening notes.

By the end of the hour, all the locals, journalists and a spattering of celebrities (Virginia Madsen, Ray Liotta and Twilight hottie Xavier Samuel) were clamouring to know more about this man that beavers away in a darkened room away from the bright lights of Hollywood.

A few days later, I got the chance to meet my newfound hero to talk more about the hidden art of editing.

"I stumbled into the art of editing, purely because of a love of film. I really love it. I really love the magic that happens. And to me, there are a lot of moments of magic that happen in the cutting room that no-one will see or know how that happens because we are in the dark room".

I notice that Pietro has a bugbear that pops up several times throughout our conversation - how editors are often forced to stick with the screenplay.

"It's not about matching a script - oh he moves from A to B. That's not really editing - editing is the written emotional subtext of what you're trying to express. You know, it's why you choose to go to a close up of the person. Film and sound are very malleable. They're really like clay. You have to think that you're shaping it.

"The reason movies tend to be too long is not because the editors are slow and like to cut slow - editors want to get to the point - it's because the scripts are really really dense in terms of the amount of pages. Sometimes scripts are overwritten. But you know what? I can make that point without saying anything - the actor makes that point. I don't need to explain anything else."

And next time you're sitting in a multiplex watching a film, watch out for who's watching you:-

"It's very good for me to see a film with an audience - with other eyes. You feel the presence and you feel how they react. So it's almost like seeing it again when the audience changes. And it's a great satisfaction when things work in movies and the reaction is always the same, it's a really good feeling. When hundreds of people react at the same time, it's a really good feeling."

For all of you out there who want to try out film editing or even a bit of editing at home, here are Pietro Scalia's top three tips:-

1. Take your home movies or your photographs and put them in an order. Try and find a narrative between those images - What is it about those images that connect in some ways? Then run some music underneath. Then you can experiment by changing around music and that will make you feel different so you start to interact with the material.

2. One of the most important things to do is actually recognise your own reaction to the edit. Be aware of that because that's fundamental. Almost step outside of yourself and thinking 'why did it make me feel like that?' - If you feel it then other people will feel it as well.

3. Go with your instinct. You have to be careful not to think of something as stale because you've seen it over and over again. You have a tendency sometimes to change things because you go "I'm going to change that because I'm tired of that." but then you go back and look at the first edit and you go "It was right the first time. The first instinct is good."

]]>Plan B's Plan to Help the Youngtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15786402012-06-07T19:00:00-04:002012-08-07T05:12:03-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/Ill Manors is 'bleak.'

I'm not sure what it is about 'bleak' that annoyed me so much but I tend to feel that the word has a dismissive quality that suggests that nothing good can come out of watching the movie.

But I whole-heartedly disagree that this is the case, as I hope that it will make people aware of lives that are very different from their own.

Just in case you don't know, the movie intertwines several tales of young people growing up in Forest Gate in East London. They are all based on real-life incidences, according to the press notes.

These stories are extreme but there again the characters are all extremely damaged people. These include violent drug dealers, novice gang members, prostitutes, sex slaves and ruthless street-level entrepreneurs.

This might sound like just another typical Brit flick about gangsters and whores, but it truly isn't.

What makes the film special is that Plan B illustrates each of the principal character's backstories soon after they appear with lavish music videos.

While you feel electrified by the style of the music and the complexity of the editing, you get to subliminally understand why these characters have ended up behaving the way they do - and that nearly always comes down to neglect.

When I chatted to Plan B about the film (there's a video attached to this blog), he made it clear that it's his mission to save these people from neglect and give them guidance:-

"I'm starting my charity which is going to work more like a trust to bring in money and give money to what I call vigilante social workers - people that are living in these environments doing good things within their communities, trying to change the kind of negative upbringing that these kids are having and doing positive things."

My meeting with Plan B reminded me of another interview I carried out with director Lukas Moodysson, who came up with the heart-breaking 'Lilya 4-Ever' - about a girl who falls prey to the dark worlds of human trafficking and sexual slavery.

When I asked him how he discovered the story, he told me to 'open your eyes' and his theory of the world is that more than half of society walk around with their eyes closed, and only want to see their own version of reality. But if you really look, only then can you see the true reality and do something about the injustices in this world.

This statement profoundly affected me and I can still hear him in my head sometimes.

But I don't think it's just the eyes. I work for Action for Children part-time as a mentor - or Independent Volunteer, as they're known - and I remember clearly the open day I attended, as something unusual or probably usual happened.

The room was crowded with well-meaning twenty and thirty somethings about to start their journey to become an Independent Volunteer to a young person in the care system.

The man chairing the initial session spoke about the realities of what your young person could be like, what could have happened to them and how the position - to keep contact with the young person and go for a day out every few weeks - is possibly a life time commitment.

After this introduction, we broke for a coffee break and when we reconvened the room was clear of over half these "well-meaning" people.

But if these people had persisted, they would have got to realize that the experience of being an Independent Volunteer is beneficial not only to the young person but also to yourself - mainly because you understand you can indeed make a difference to someone who has had an unfortunate childhood.

So please, people, open your eyes and ears and go and see "Ill Manors." And remember it's not bleak, it's real, and you can, if you truly want, help change these young people's realities.

You see, you can't get better dramatic narrative than by throwing strangers (especially ego-centric ones) among each other in a confined space and seeing how they'll get along.

One of my favourite British film directors - who because of the critics and the shame, will remain nameless - told me once it was his secret obsession.

The fact of the matter is that it's a programme which offers real drama, real narrative and real characters (once they forget who they're trying to portray) - and there is nothing else on television like it.

I'm not a subscriber to Charlie Brooker's view that the narrative is created by the way it's edited (that's editing, full stop, Charlie. You have to lose time - get over it), but I do subscribe to what transpires from the character clashes and the misunderstandings that take place.

It is akin to watching a bullfight but this isn't inhumane viewing. They are not wild animals put unwillingly in a pen but instead are people who have their own minds and by now know the consequences, but are willing to risk them.

I feel a need to watch these people as they are as dangerous to each other and to themselves and you can't get better narrative than that.

Tonight, we were introduced to the new bunch by the Master of Ceremonies, Brian Dowling.

He's not really a Master but more of a Bachelor, as his improvised comments and gestures fell painfully to tumbleweed with the audience at the studio as well as at home.

I honestly thought this year that the young Monty from Withnail and I would have been sidelined and given his P45 and one of the other three Big Brother presenters - Emma Willis, Alice Levine or Jamie East, who are each utterly brilliant on the spin-off show Big Brother's Bit on the Side - would have taken his place.

Anyway, is there any scope for good narrative this year? I would say so but we have to get the totty over first.

Then there are the 'characters.' Shievonne, a playboy bunny who doesn't drink water; Adam, a convicted gangster from Los Angeles who lives in Dudley for the purpose of nationality; Chris, a chipmunk in a bodyguard's body; Caroline, a gap year posh girl idiot, and Victoria, presumably an ex-Richard Desmond employee.

There is also a chance of bigger fights this year as they seem to have cast numerous alpha males to lock antlers with each other.

These are Conor from Derry, who thinks he is the perfect man but, leaving himself up to objective judgment as they always do, seems to have hips bigger than his ego; Luke, an entrepreneur who's decided to leave his businesses for the summer just for a laugh; and finally Benedict, a school teacher and porn star.

Shocking stuff. Actually, it's not.

My ex-flatmate was a London based school teacher and porn starlet. She told me 'What else are we supposed to do with the summer holidays?' so I'm not sure this is as unusual as it sounds.

Scott from Macclesfield popped up at some point. He's posh, he's gay but he surely cannot be from Macc - I come from there and his proper British accent isn't available in the most plush areas of the borough. I have him down as fake before the show has even started.

Then there's the headline-grabbing one - he's Luke (the other one) - a straight guy who was born a girl. Although I don't doubt him for a minute, the problem is he doesn't look or sound like a girl so his vote is already diminished. His only valid stake on this claim is that he's quite physically small.

Lastly, there's Deana - the girl who had to pick nominees for Friday's eviction (she picked Lydia, Victoria, and Conor).

I'm wondering if Deana - the current Miss India UK who resides in Mumbai and Birmingham - is intended as bait for another Indian outcry after Shilpa Shetty and Jade Goody. I only believe this because the producers also have Bhavesh an outwardly gay citizen from Mumbai too in their Wildcard section (you vote for the next contestant!).

If this is a plan for outrage, it won't work. I was the one who unwittingly unleashed Shilpa-gate last time and it was a pure accident when it happened. I was just a TV producer who got a license for Channel 4 material in the Indian markets and when my company syndicated it, they didn't like what they saw.

Yeah, you can blame me for that one (although little known fact - they thought that Jackiey Goody was Jade so their outrage was at Jackiey, not Jade!).

If this year's mini-family is going to get any publicity, they only have Richard Desmond's Daily Star, Daily Express and OK! Magazine to do the business.

But, if it's any consolation, they'll always be doing the business in my brain.]]>Tired of Cannestag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15464302012-05-25T19:00:00-04:002012-07-25T05:12:18-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
I arrived at the press junket for the new HBO movie Hemingway and Gellhorn to find most of the other journalists there acting like doped up zombies.

Even Nicole Kidman tells me how exhausted she is before my interview starts in a croaky Southern drawl crossed with Australian accent (when did she start talking like this?) and she's only been in town a few days - not like the rest of us.

Publicists and hacks alike keep asking me if they look as tired as they feel. I lie and say 'no' trying to keep up people's spirits.

But it's obvious it's not going to help. Everyone here needs new livers, a good soak and around 300 hours of sleep.

Personally, my caffeine levels are outweighing the rosé, causing me to tremble. I'm lighting up cigarettes before I've even finished the one I'm smoking and that's really not helping.

The celebrity-headed hydra of a festival is dying and there are only a few more stars' heads to cut off before the beast comes crashing down.

The finish line is in sight and the competition, which dictates which stars are on the red carpet, is almost over. There are 22 films vying for the Palme D'Or and as usual nobody can predict the winner.

L-R Rollo Ross with a certain Kylie Minogue

My personal favourite has been Holy Motors by Leos Carax which is known by people here as "the Kylie film," despite her only being in it for around 8 minutes.

It's a really strange mix of all sorts of film genres and follows an actor (or is he?) who is driven around in a limousine/theatrical dressing room in which he puts on prosthetics. He then leaves the car and lives someone's life for a short period of time.

It features Eva Mendes in a burka, a flower-eating troll, a motion-capture sex scene and Kylie belting out a sad love song in a deserted hotel.

Kylie told me that she was still "really perplexed" as to what it's all about but maybe that's the point.

But, if a film stands head and shoulders over the others like Holy Motors does for me, you can guarantee it won't win the Palme D'Or as the jury wouldn't want to be populist as they want to protect their newly-found art house image.

You can guarantee that every year, there's always massive bewilderment and a giant 'you WHAT?' as the prizes are announced.

You can also guarantee that there has to be at least one Hollywood and one French star/director picked to get one of the main prizes (Palme D'Or, Actor, Actress, Director, Jury Prize) so as to create publicity internationally and nationally. The rest are all up for grabs.

But, does the competition really matter? The pocket sized Mexican star Gael Garcia Bernal doesn't think it's that important, as he reminisced about losing his Cannes virginity back in the year 2000.

"That year in Cannes was known for 'Amores Perros' and not because of the film that won the competition. 'Amores Perros' was the one that made the breakthrough and it beat the Palme D'Or. It doesn't matter which section a film is in, it's whether it's good or not."

This year, though, there doesn't appear to have been that hidden gem - or not that I've heard of.

But there are still two more days left, so there's still a chance for one to shine through. I only wish the sun would as the bloody rain's started again.]]>Cannes: It's a Brand's Worldtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15408862012-05-23T18:32:10-04:002012-07-23T05:12:05-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
It's substantially about brands trying to hawk their names around the festival and ensure that they are associated with the most luxurious event of the year.

To be fair, even when the festival isn't on, luxury brands line the streets with their logos and boutiques (the major ones on La Croisette, and the lesser ones a block back on the Rue D'Antibes).

But when the May convention comes around, you can barely move without having a brand thrown in your face and pushed down your throat.

In my guestimation it was all started by the world famous red carpet 'Steps' as fashion and jewellery labels for years have fought great style wars to get the famous faces stuck on their latest designer dresses, shoes, and diamond necklaces.

I've seen first hand how these stars are moved from showroom to showroom (or rather hotel room) in the Martinez and how they try and woo the stars to choose their threads for their appearance in front of the world's press.

But then there's the hair and make up. L'Oreal have for as long as I've been her been associated with the festival.

If anyone saw the photos of Cheryl Cole in Cannes looking like her dress had soaked up the red carpet, she was there solely as a 'L'Oreal girl' and every night at 7pm the company wheel out three glamorous ladies to try and grab the limelight off the competition film's stars.

But if you can't get on the red carpet, you have to think of other methods of association, like a good old-fashioned party.

Every night there are free booze events, sometimes by the companies that supply the drinks like Belvedere Red or Stella Artois, or free booze events sponsored by fashion brands like Calvin Klein or Replay.

At both of these events celebrities are wheeled out in front of branding boards in the hope of free publicity and an association with the fashionable festival.

I've heard several brand publicists talk about their thrill about getting an A-list celebrity photographed with a mystery girl, knowing it will get them the publicity they crave and they can then say their job in Cannes is done.

There are other ways of getting exposure. Billboards are an old school method, but they're still present on the Croisette.

Hewlett Packard has been organising daily competitions for journalists to win tickets to walk up the steps with the stars - something they'd normally never be able to do. Now, that was a fun prize (thanks for that one!)

L-R: Rollo Ross and a glamorous friend on the Cannes red carpet this week

But an uncommon way is to try and align your brand with film makers.

Deutsches Telekom, a German telecommunications company, is actually creating something which sounds on paper like an amazing idea. Hats off to the ideas man behind this one.

They are producing an interactive road movie called Move On that will be shot over five weeks, where people across Europe can alter the location, plot points and even music of the film by sending in their ideas on-line.

It's already got its main star Mads Mikkelsen, the baddie from Casino Royale, and they've already kick started the interactivity by doing online and on-going auditions pan-Europe for the female lead. They haven't decided what she should look like but they want someone that exudes mystery, as the plot is, even to the director Asger Leth, a complete mystery.

One of the brands you maybe would least expect to try for Cannes luxury alignment is Electrolux, who's erected a huge dining room bang slap in the middle of the festival right by the Steps.

They've gone for a completely different tack, by essentially taking over the catering for the official side of the festival - and by doing so they can promote their kitchen products.

They are working with Michelin-starred chefs not only to create amazing banquets you've never tasted before (who knew cucumber and white chocolate would go so well together?) but also to get feedback on their appliances by these culinary geniuses so they can make their kitchen products even better for chefs and consumers alike.

"The angle and the strength we have is that the story is unique and is adding to the festival," explained Tom Astin, the PR Manager from the Swedish company over a rather brilliant lunch. "It's not just the films but there are so many things going on here and people need to eat every day and we're here to make the best stuff."

I'm currently sitting in the American Pavilion where I can see just at a glance six major brand boards and that's without turning my head.

Festival goers always say that when they return back to their homes, they need time to decompress. This year, I feel I also need time to be debrand.]]>A Fleeting Meeting With Ronan Keatingtag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15383602012-05-23T03:23:20-04:002012-07-22T05:12:24-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
"I got here yesterday and it was pissing with the rain and I was like what the f***, Cannes? Come on. No, we weren't happy. I came from Sydney and you get off the plane after 25 hours and it's pissing with rain. Not happy."

He's not the only one. The festival is normally drenched with scorching sunshine and now it's just drenched.

The beautiful people now have their toned bodies covered with winter clothes and anoraks, the press who run around endlessly have blistered feet from damp shoes, and the stars who hit the red carpet have ended up looking like drowned rats by the time they've got up to the top of the famous steps.

Danish actor Mads Mikkelsen told me over a lunch for his new project Move On that the cast and crew of his film The Hunt by Thomas Vinterberg spent no more than two minutes on the carpet while the heavens poured. "I was so disappointed. We waited for our big moment and then it was like, is this it?!?"

The greyness has dampened the colourful glamour, the bleary eyes are no longer able to be covered up with sunglasses and the red carpet is now a rather disgusting squelchy shade of maroon.

Not good.

But the sun is finally creeping through the clouds as I meet up with Ronan, who's here for his acting debut in Goddess.

I have four minutes to talk to the ex-Boyzone frontman, but the You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All singer is doing the opposite, as he charges through my questions passionately at about a thousand words per minute.

It's not surprising he's so passionate. He's been trying to get into cinema for the past 10 years.

"Honestly, I've been going to readings, auditions, and trying and it's been big stuff, like big directors and getting to the final five or six people and I've had representation in Los Angeles and the UK but I guess one thing as well is someone taking the risk. You know because it's not easy saying this guy could be an actor, this singer."

I'm reminded of the viral single I'm On a Boat, I'm On a Motherf**king Boat as he explained to me his first day on set.

"It was just the whole thing of being on a set, a film set, here I am I'm on a film set," and then he states the obvious in his excitement, "I have dialogue, I have lines, all the things happening at the same time, it was bloody incredible."

Believe it or not, Ronan is playing a marine scientist in Goddess, whose job is to save whales in the Antarctic.

But that's not what the film is about. It's about his on-screen wife who lives a lonely life sitting at home looking after her two kids. But all of a sudden she becomes an internet sensation by singing quirky numbers through her webcam.

I first met Ronan back in 1998 and he's always been incredibly serious. It seems now he's a changed man, and has started swearing now his role model days are behind him.

"I was shitting myself and my first day on set was with two kids in the scene with me. So my first day on set and I'm dealing with kids but it went bloody brilliant. It was frightening but it was great. I'll never forget that day."

Ronan announced his divorce from his wife Yvonne only last month after 14 years of marriage, but it seems like the Irish star is embracing his new lease of life.

"A lot has changed in my life in the last few years, big changes and this is the beginning of something very different. But I'm not going to walk away from music."

The movie doesn't have a release date in the UK as of yet, so we'll have to wait to see how good Ronan's acting chops are. So, I just had to ask him what he thinks of his film presence.

"By no means do I think I'm brilliant but I can act now where I couldn't do that before. I understand it, it's telling the truth, it's playing that character and being that character and not looking like you were acting. It was a long process to get there but I could walk into any role now, I'd be ready for anything. How I rate it, I couldn't tell you that."

And with that comment, the sun, like his burgeoning film career, miraculously blazed through the grey clouds.]]>Being a Lemon in Cannestag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15332542012-05-21T19:00:00-04:002012-07-21T05:12:12-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
You see, with most interviews you're either talking to the actual real-life human being or their alter ego, which is actually more common than you'd think. A lot of A-listers in particular seem to come across like they're acting in interviews and just reciting a script given to them by their publicist.

But with the comedy TV host Keith Lemon, I feel like I'm interviewing both him and his creator Leigh Francis and I struggle to understand which person I'm talking to.

He may look like Keith with his bandaged hand, ginger moustache (is it real?) and blond mullet and he loves to talk about celebrities (Yvette Fielding, Michael J Fox and Billy Ocean are mentioned several times) but every so often the mask slips and out pops Leigh Francis, answering more intelligently and sincerely.

L-R Rollo and Keith - or is it Leigh?

He, or rather they, have come to Cannes to launch his/their first feature film and at the start of the interview I think it's Leigh telling me, "I don't know how any of this is happening, I don't know how this is happening" in a warm and genuinely ego-less manner.

But it is happening nonetheless and one of the first things Leigh and Keith want to clear up is about the film's title.

"You might notice that it's called Keith Lemon the Film and not Keith Lemon the Movie" (is this Keith or Leigh?!) "and that's because I wanted to keep it British."

"I think simple ideas are the best and people said to me 'couldn't you think of a name for your film?' and I said 'Well, what's Spider-man called? Spider-man. What's Batman called? Batman. Have you seen Borat yet? Who's in it? Borat. What's it called? Borat. And have you seen what The Inbetweeners film's called? Inbetweeners the Movie but it's English isn't it? So they should have called it Inbetweeners the Film."

"I don't want to pull the wool over people's eyes and think that I want to make it to America because originally I probably would have done but I realized you can make films in England, so it don't matter."

I begin to understand that the key differences between Keith and Leigh are the strength and volume of their Leeds accents, the amount of 'FOOKS' there are in an answer, and how Keith loves to express things as dialogue.

So it was Keith that told me "I said to me mates 'I've made a film' and they went 'have yer FOOK?'

"A lot of things I do is just to tell me mates in Leeds, just to wind 'em up. 'I'm doing a film with Kelly Brook' 'FOOK OFF. No you're not.' 'I am.'

"I remember when I said 'I'm gonner be on telly' and they were like 'FOOK OFF there's no FOOKIN' way you'll be on telly.' And I'm like 'I will! Why wouldn't I?' I'm living the dream really. I put ideas out there and when they say yes I go 'REALLY?!?' I'm riding that wave, man."

"I don't try too hard. I don't break it down. I'm not a comedy scientist. I don't think of me as a comedian, I'm just having a laugh," adds Leigh.

The film (not movie) is an origins story of the character Keith Lemon and was inspired bizarrely by X-Men Origins: Wolverine, although with less muscle and claws and more filth.

"Everyone says it's like filth and I say it's like warm and lovely. Me mum liked it anyway."

"People have gone 'oh it's like a proper film.' I think people think it's going to be like one of them mockumentary things or TV spin-off but it isn't. It's like a story."

The persona Keith Lemon has appeared across ITV1 and 2 over the past few years and the fact he has a film coming out proves that his brand is still very much on the rise.

"Each year for me has been like a step," Leigh explains, "and some people on Twitter say 'so have you peaked now?' and I say 'No, I've peaked when I've had enough' and I haven't had enough. I want to make a series of films where we'll get all the same cast back but just in different scenarios."

Then Keith takes the baton from Leigh "In the next one there will 100% be a scene where I kill a dragon because that's what I want." And just go 'I HATE DRAGONS.'"

But in the meantime it's all about this production that's slated for release in the UK on 24 August. "It's a small film with a big heart and a massive penis. Cos I get my cock made bigger in the film. When I get rich, I get a cock enlargement."

"I hope people like it, and if they do we'll make another one and if they don't, we won't. I'm sure some people will come up to me and say it was shit, but I'll say 'have you made a film?' Well FOOK OFF THEN.'"]]>A(n) (Un)Usual Day in Cannestag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15311442012-05-20T19:00:00-04:002012-07-20T05:12:15-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
However, what I'm reminded of today is that it's also completely weird in an insane banana type way.

I wake up around 9am and 90% Rosé from the evening before and get myself together to face the day, starting off with a complementary breakfast.

Several journalists are sitting quietly around a table in the Majestic Hotel and then we remember why we're there - to ask questions about analogue photography - as you do - and its future with marketing managers from Lomokino and MUBI, as well as former Cannes winner Apichatpong Weerasethakul - try saying that after a few glasses of...actually just try saying that!

As soon as the last croissant is munched, it's time to rush down the Croisette through all the staggeringly beautiful people (where do they all come from?!) to the famous wedding cake shaped hotel, The Carlton.

Inside the illustrious and presently rather dark Grand Salon, the place is teeming with Asian journalists and a press conference is droning on in Mandarin, or at least I think it's in Mandarin.

I'm struggling to follow anything for around 15 minutes until they finally show the trailer for the movie, Painted Skin II. I'm not sure what happened in Painted Skin I but if the weird and wonderful fantasy footage of a strange ice lady putting her hand into some other woman's spine is anything to go by, I expect it was quite interesting.

As soon as it finishes there's a round of applause and I hot foot it out of there to get to my next appointment - an interview with Gael Garcia Bernal.

I arrive at the Shivas beach and am in the process of checking in with the publicist for the film, when my eyes and mouth drift away from the conversation.

"There's a giant rhinoceros head on the wall with yellow boxing gloves."

"I know" replies the publicist. "We've been having sandstorms (?) so we're going to do the interviews inside."

I sit and gawp at this strange fixture for a while before being told I'm to be "loaded" into a room to await the Mexican actor.

There's a friendly bunch of journalists in the room and we talk about eye surgery among other things until Gael arrives.

It's at this point I notice there's a bath in the corner of the room, when my brain should be fixed on the film No - the true story of the advertising executive who developed the campaign to defeat Pinochet in Chile's 1988 referendum. But there's a bath in the corner.

And before I know it, all of the other five journalists and Gael are involved in a discussion about the pros and cons of democracy, while I'm trying to interject a question about his first festival experience but instead find myself making strange interrupting sounds, like "Eeeh" and "Aaah." I become aware that I seem to be coming across more like a Tellytubby than a professional journalist.

When that was all finished, it was time for Plan B. The music star has turned director for the upcoming movie Ill Manors. I don't think I'm allowed to say anything yet about this amazing and super-slick movie as I've agreed on an embargo. Oh whoops. Does that count, Sam?

As I wait for him to finish up a previous interview, I can't help but notice a man with a hugely oversized doll on his head. He appears to be having great fun, but I am utterly bewildered.

Anyway, I like Mister B. He's not only an obviously talented musician and film maker now, but also he's got a great heart, mind and soul, so when I leave I feel like a failure of a human being, and when I reach the Croisette again I look at all these hot people and feel like I've been whacked with the ugly stick. Ouch.

I think it's time to cheer myself and who better to do that than the zany ITV star Keith Lemon? He's in town for Keith Lemon the Film (not 'Movie' as "that's American") and by the sound of it, it's going to be a winner.

As I walk around a mile to the apartment to interview him, I pass two sexy nuns, the Mario Bros, Spongebob Squarepants and a man dressed as a lion.

I tell him a little bit about my surreal day and he thinks there's nothing better to perpetuate this than to smash some crisps. So we go about punching the bowl of crisps in front of us and talk about Yvette Fielding and the lack of her in his film ("She was out ghost-hunting"), while the publicists outside are probably wondering what the hell is going on.

We finish the conversation with him talking about semen and penises although other words are used.

And as I wave goodbye to Keith, I realise the day isn't quite over,

Because somehow I've found myself at the American club Nikki Beach in a kind of orgiastic rave with banging house music and with so many of these beautiful people with buns of steel, gravity-defying breasts (both male and female), and uber-designer sunglasses. The drink bills are as expensive as their clothes and now I feel like I've been bludgeoned to death by the ugly stick and had 'POOR' tattooed on my forehead.

And someone has just been sick on my shoe.

Just your average day at the Cannes film festival and it isn't over.

The sun hasn't even set but fortunately my Rosé levels are on the rise and life is good.]]>Can Cannes Do It?tag:www.huffingtonpost.com,2012:/theblog//3.15202802012-05-16T05:14:04-04:002012-07-16T05:12:04-04:00Rollo Rosshttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/rollo-ross/
Some years it barely registers with the general public, while other times you feel like you've been a VIP at the centre of the universe and all your friends get green-eyed while talking over a beer in Camden.

You see, like every festival, Cannes, despite its reputation as leader of the pack, has to work hard to hit the front pages and like the Oscars, this is more likely to come about from a celebrity or their fashion or a combination of the two. But it's the programming of the official selection that will dictate the flow of editorial and will decide if the festival is a success or not.

If news editors around the world give up on their coverage of the world famous red carpet (which is more common than you'd think) then the festival is sunk - and so are all the brands associated with the festival who spend a fortune trying to get a large dose of not-so-free publicity.

So, it's more than important to kick off the festival with a bang; or rather an American film where all the stars are globally recognizable.

This year, it's Wes Anderson's Moonrise Kingdom which spearheads the Cannes charge with the likes of Tilda Swinton and Bill Murray and then the game is on to keep these stuffy news editors interested.

Cannes has a few aces up its sleeves this year. Brad Pitt will be in town to premiere Killing Them Softly slap bang in the middle of the festival which will no doubt cause a flurry of media interest - "Will Angelina come? Will she do that leg thing again? Will they have engagement rings on? Do they fart and if they do, do their pumps smell of roses?"

Following on from Brangelina, the Twilight Saga is coming to Cannes in the only way it would ever be allowed; both leads, Kristen Stewart who wouldn't know a smile if it kicked her in the teeth and her awkward public schoolboy boyfriend Robert Pattinson are both making appearances; the former in the Jack Kerouac adaptation On the Road and the latter in David Cronenberg's Cosmopolis.

And as if that wasn't good/bad enough, Zac Efron is making his Cannes debut in The Paperboy. The only teen superstar missing is Justin Bieber but if I've learned anything over the years at the festival, it's important not to rule anything out.

Like, who would have thought Kylie had gone back into acting and was appearing at the festival in what looks like a very strange French film called Holy Motors? This, unlike Kylie, is bound to raise eyebrows.

Towards the end on the 24th, there's the perennial amfAR event (American Foundation for AIDS Research), the stock cube of Cannes celebrity juice, where all the stars from the festival turn out to have one massive party conveniently in front of the world's press.

If all goes according to plan, it would appear on paper that you're going to hear quite a lot from this year's festival but you never know how the world will turn and how the brains of news editors work.

I personally won't know until I get back to the UK and go to the pub with my friends. They'll fill me on what they've heard on-line, in the papers and on TV about the fashion faux-pas, the celebrity gossip and the rumours.

However, they'll always end up asking "But what were the good films?!"]]>