A box is still a box

There’s this box that the cats keep sitting in because it’s an empty box and cats have to put their buttholes on cardboard, I guess, but Victor was trying to make me laugh because I’ve been sort of down and so he was like, “Move over, cats. That looks like fun. I’m gonna sit in that box,” but boxes aren’t made for people unless they’re refrigerator boxes (which are awesome and remind me why cats probably like boxes) and so he fucked it all up and it was funny for a second but then the cats were like, “Hey, fucker. Are you drunk? Because stop fucking up our boxes. You have your own box. It’s the house you live in, asshole,” but Victor didn’t care because he can’t hear cat thoughts but then the cats were like, “You know what? Fuck this. This is still our box. You can’t destroy us. Our box is still living on IN OUR MINDS” and I was like, “Whoa. That’s a pretty bad-ass attitude, cats. I salute you.”

(That was the longest run-on sentence I’ve written in a week.)

“I’m mad, but I’m not moving.” ~ Ferris Mewler

“Fuck you. Still a box.” ~ Hunter S. Tomcat

And I was super inspired because sometimes things are all fucked up but you just keep living and enjoying things even if they’re totally broken. Because that’s what you do when life destroys your box. This is a weird analogy (especially since “box” is euphemism for “vagina”) but you know what I mean, probably. Point? Maybe things are shitty, but if you just keep living sometimes you realize that your broken outside has some nice things going for it. Like, it lets the light in like a skylight on all sides. Even if you don’t want that. Which it sort of seems like the cats don’t, but whatever. Stop glaring at us, cats. Other boxes are coming. We get them all the time, y’all.

Yesssssss! I relate to this so much. I have been really down because I have been job-searching and haven’t gotten even one interview, so I spend every day feeling really useless and generally bummed, but then I realized this week– hey, this is precious free time that I should be treating as a GIFT, dammit. And I’m going to enjoy every single minute and not feel guilty and worthless because I’ll get a job eventually, and then I’ll just feel dumb for wasting all this time. This is my box, and I’m enjoying it!

Love the box even if it is broken. Good motto, and one that I can use. Here’s another one, maybe: love the box no matter what size it is. I had a cat who loved boxes so much that he would get into it even if there was no possibility that he would fit. He’d just get as much of himself in as he could, which was often hilarious. One time I put a teeny-tiny little jewelry box lid on the floor and he immediately went and sat very precisely on top of it. “Hey,” he seemed to be saying, ” technically it’s a box. I’ll make it work.”

“Maybe things are shitty, but if you just keep living sometimes you realize that your broken outside has some nice things going for it. Like, it lets the light in like a skylight on all sides. Even if you don’t want that.” Thanks, Jenny, I needed this today! (Also cats!)

I’ve read this three times waiting for the school gates to open here in my London neighbourhood. Laughing my head off. Other parents must be thinking I’m the drunk one. I keep assuring them it’s Victor.

I feel like this should me my life motto. I need a shirt with Faris Mewler that says “it may be broken but it’s mine.” That’s my life I may be broken but I’m still me. Wow who knew Faris Mewler could be such an inspiration.

Not that your cats’ thoughts aren’t pithy and to the point. Seriously, Victor quit fucking up their shit. But here’s a photo album of cats & Shakespearean insults in case your cats want to call Victor out 1500s style. http://imgur.com/gallery/92EpE

Also, there is probably a way to post the images directly but I can’t figure it out. Don’t judge me! Plus, my WordPress user name is my daughter’s and now I realize I don’t know what she’s posting when/if she logs onto WordPress because I’m a really good Mother. Crap.

I keep scrolling for the picture of Victor in the box but it’s not there. The mental picture probably doesn’t reflect his true awesomeness or his speed of getting out of the box before you stopped laughing and picked up your camera 🙂 Thank you for being YOU and sharing your broken-ness..

Just duct tape the box up. You can get some really colorful tape that I’m sure they’ll just love + if Victor sits in it again, maybe it won’t rip open. Of course, now you have an important reason to buy some kind of something online- because everyone knows cats need boxes and Victor has to be ok with whatever it is b/c it’s pretty much his fault that you have to buy something anyway since he broke the box to start with.

Capped off by leaving at 9:15 to babysit my nephew, and only realizing when I hit traffic and was running late that since I was supposed to be at their place at 10:45, and they live half an hour away, I have apparently lost my ability to competently manage time.

Stopped at the French bakery and bought some pastries that are basically butter and sugar held together by a bit of flour. The woman at the counter liked my t-shirt (Humpty Dumpty having a great fall http://shirt.woot.com/offers/humpty-dumpty-had-a-great-fall?ref=cnt_ctlg_dgn_0 ), which I wore to amuse nephew, who at 2 1/2 is far too young to appreciate the word play. Let myself into their place and there was a bottle of selzer in the fridge for me, and the remains of a tub of yogurt for my dog because my SIL is the nicest, sweetest person ever. Regrouping. Taking a moment to breathe. And all should be well in 15 mins when they get home from nephew’s appointment. Need to remember to take those moments to breathe.

I’m so glad I found your blog. Thank you for just being you and helping us not feel so alone in our brokenness. May we all be more like Ferris and Hunter and say screw this, I’m claiming what’s mine. Thanks for the laugh.

It’s an ongoing joke how many boxes we get (yay, review copies!), so we have an unending supply of boxes for the cats. But sometimes one is just so perfect that we have to hold onto it for months. And if it gets ruined… My cats feel your cats’ pain.

I had that with music. I love it and love sharing songs with people who I know would love them too. I had built my playlist around songs that a particular guy would like and when after almost a year everything fell apart, listening to it was super painful. I still love those songs though and I’m determind to keep listening to them until I can enjoy them again!

This post was perfectly timed. I have a job interview this morning and I know it’s a Behavioral Interview (antiquated “Tell me about a time when….” crap on steroids) and I can’t think of any good scenarios to talk about from past jobs so I was getting all grumpy and negative, but then I saw this. And it made me smile, and also see that maybe I can reframe my stories and, possibly, get through the interview relatively unscathed. So, thank you. And Victor and the cats – all of you, for being you!

“Cats have to put their buttholes on cardboard” Possibly the most true statement ever! If there is a box or even just a square of cardboard (like from a calendar) on the floor, that’s where my kitty is. And eff off, September! Ruining everybody’s mood. It’s almost gone. Happy days are coming, y’all.

We’re a 3-Stage Box Destruction family. 1. The cats get it until a new box comes along, it then (2) moves to the dog to shred, gnaw on, then ignore until finally (3) I throw it in the recycling. It’s the box of life. I’m trying to say it’s the circle of life for boxes in my house, but shortened it to box of life because I haven’t had any coffee yet.

That is a great metaphor for life. And I do hope you got a good laugh over Victor in that tiny little cat-sized box to make it all worth it.

For the record, my 7-year-old uses large boxes as a game room. He goes inside to play his hand-held video game for hours. Or maybe that’s how long it takes him to get through all the duct tape I used to seal it. I prefer to think he likes it.

I needed this today. I hate the school board. I hate the school my kids got rezoned to. The principal is kinda like Snuffleupagus was on Sesame Street when I was a kid; he only exists to those who spend lots of time in the school. I still believe he’s imaginary. I want to dive headfirst into the Halloween candy I bought just a bit ago after running all over creation to find one little cord for the hubby for a presentation at work today. I need wine and some whiskey and maybe a little vodka. But this, this has actually helped me feel a little better today. Maybe I won’t have an anxiety attack in an empty house today. I can do this. Thank you. 🙂

I feel like the other part of this post that is inspirational is the reminder that ‘other boxes are coming’. Maybe your favorite box got destroyed, but now there is room for an even better box to take its place. 🙂

“And I was super inspired because sometimes things are all fucked up but you just keep living and enjoying things even if they’re totally broken. Because that’s what you do when life destroys your box.”
YESYESYES!!
🙂

Michelle at #58: I was starting to think I was the only one with a defective cat–well, OK, he’s not defective, he’s absolutely perfect at being himself, but as far as I can tell Romeo has absolutely no interest whatsoever in boxes or cardboard of any kind. Bed, couches, carpets, my roommate’s recliner (which he’s claimed to the point where, if he’s in or on it, Matt will just meekly head for the couch instead, in spite of my telling him “It’s OK, you can toss his furry butt out of the chair, really!”), my leather computer chair: hell, yes! Boxes: nope, not interested. The only time I ever got him into a box was by liberally lacing it with some of his Grandpa’s (read: my dad’s) homegrown catnip, but that only lasted as long as it took him to eat the nip; then he jumped out, rolled around on the floor, and headed for the recliner. I love the puddin’ head, but I will never understand him, and he likes it that way…

…and no, Jenny, I didn’t forget you. hugs There seems to be a lot of this going around lately, and I wish there wasn’t, but I’ll keep what you said in mind. In the meantime, if Victor’s willing, I’d like to see a picture of him in the cats’ box as well (not yours, mind you; baring your soul is one thing, but …). 😉

Sadness has been a filthy tramp around here lately, too. I need a box. And a cat. I have neither. I do have a 5’10 tween who still loves to get in boxes. And push things off of counters. And runs hot and cold with his tweenish affections. Come to think of it, maybe I DO have a cat.

I love so much about this post. We lost our older cat early in the summer, and adopted a kitten and a 1 yo cat about six weeks ago to be friends for our remaining cat. They make me so happy. Their determination to be wherever or do whatever I’ve just asked them not to. The unfaltering, swaggering confidence and self-assuredness of a kitten. I wish I had an ounce of that. I wish we all had some of that. Well, some people need less of that. But the people I like need more.

Yeah, I totally kept thinking of the euphemism version of box while reading this. I giggled through the entire thing. Especially when Victor was saying “that looks like fun, cats”. Which kitty is another euphemism. Basically i’m 42 going on 12.

I love your run-on sentences. I find run-on sentences very therapeutic because they are an actual substitute for actual running which I used to do and that’s why I was so skinny. But I was still fucking sick. Now I am fat and sick, and don’t fun (well only when I’m using run-on sentences and reading funny material do I fun these days) and I don’t run either. Wow. If my high school English teacher could only see me now. Thanks for the flattened box, Victor.

We have a box for our female (read:jerk) cat that sits in the living room. We christened it (in Sharpie) Fort McAsshole. Our neighbor, who has a dog, thought this was hilarious. Inevitable, yes. Hilarious? Hilarious is when jerk cat is crouched in there and one of the other members of the feline herd hops in without realizing the Fort is occupied. Pandelerium.

This is awesome! I love the cats’ persistence in the proper use of the box lol. Also have you seen the blog post where enormous boxes were put out for enormous cats (mountain lions, tigers, lions, ocelots, etc)? I have also put out sheets of paper (8.5 x 11) and watched the cats ponder which one to use.

I got a new armchair delivered to my house and left the box out on the front porch for a few days. I got home from the gym one day (I’d gone straight from work) to find an angry note scribbled on the box. It was from my sister and it read:

“If you’re not going to come home right after work you should let people know. I hid in this damn box for 45 minutes waiting to scare you. But you had to go and ruin it. I hope you and your box are very happy together. You suck.”

I called her after I had stopped crying with laughter. She was genuinely mad at me! Which of course made me laugh even harder.

I need you to come to our house and read my daughter’s cat’s mind. Apparently she thinks she’s one of the bunnies (we own 2) and hangs with them all the time and even tries to use their litter pans and eat their food. My daughter thinks she’s having species identity issues. 🙂

Well this could not be more perfect post. Life destroyed my box last week when my treasure of a dog who has been one of my best friends for 14 years fell asleep and never woke up. I go from angry, to complete despair, to emptiness so many times a day. My heart is absolutely broken. I just keep waiting to see her round the bend, keep wanting to hold her, keep wanting to pet her one last time. I just don’t know how I’m going to go on without her, but I’m trying to anyway, no matter how much I may fumble along the way. I did well on a phone interview last week when angel (my dog) was still with us. I truly think her presence that day kept me calm and helped me so much. That same nonprofit just called me back today and scheduled an in person interview for next week. I believe angel helped me again..this time from the other side to help me gain this interview. Hopefully my grief doesn’t show through. Thank you again Jenny for this poignant post. Sometimes that’s all we can do.. move along brokenly…but still move along.

Omg! I’ve just started following you!,,, I just (how many times can I use just or exclamation points!!!! There is just no limit!!! Apparently! In my world! ) finished reading your book “Furiously Happy” and loved it! It was cleverly funny, sweet and painful at the same time! It’s like sucking on super sour candy…
I wanted…needed… more of the same awesome weirdness so I did something I’ve never done before and reached out a likeminded crazies and joined your blog…
omg … There’s a whole wild furious community of crazies like me!!!.. it’s like discovering a whole new world of bananas! (And bananas are soooooooo AWESOME!!!!!) I’m wondrously gobsmacked!
In my scariest lonliest moments, I actually go around my apartment hugging your book to my heart! (Yes that is a little creepy but I promise, that’s all I do!! Okay maybe I stroke the cover.. but nothing else…seriously…)
Thank you thank you thank you for your brave honesty. And for helping me let go of some of that shitty shame I feel for the ugly dark days ….😊

I had a fantastic refrigerator box when I was about 10. I had it all kitted out with a record player, a window with curtains, a sleeping bag, and a lamp. Then I went to my aunt’s house for a week and my mother threw it away while I was gone. It still lives on in my mind as the best box ever. As they say, you can take away my box, but not my dreams…

I love it that you think broken things can be good too. Leonard Cohen said to ‘ ring the bells that still can ring, forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.’ That has helped me through some dark times. Yay skylights in broken boxes!

I have one cat who refuses to even sit in one of these, and if he sees you approaching with a carton in your hands he flees. I suspect he had Experiences With Cartons at his last home. First claustrophobic cat I’ve ever had.
I love the video of the wild animals. Cats are cats, super sized or not.

“And I was super inspired because sometimes things are all fucked up but you just keep living and enjoying things even if they’re totally broken. Because that’s what you do when life destroys your box.”

Life’s a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life’s a laugh and death’s a joke, it’s true,
You’ll see it’s all a show,
Keep ’em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you!
And always look on the bright side of life.
Is the song for my phone alarm on days that I get to sleep in. Monty Python always.

I love everything about this story!!! I love that all cats love boxes and that Victor decided to sit in one. I love the cats’ badass attitude, which suddenly makes me think that a new word needs to be invented for this: BADASSITUDE. Now I also love that word. And I love your analogy. And I love cats. Thank you.

I don’t like tight places. Sometimes my life feels like I’m stuck in a box, but I’ll keep living and pretend that there is no box and the light is coming in. Now everything I say sounds like a euphemism.