Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Beard Today, Moustache Tomorrow for Jose Bautista

So you can understand my elation when Jose Bautista stepped into the batter's box last night sporting a coiffed moustache that rivals some of the best in the business.

Several folks threw around a couple names when it come to moustache likenesses, so I scoured the internets in an attempt to find which moustache best reflected the new lip sweater on Jose Bautista.

First up is Borat: while Jose Bautista can be known for letting his coiffe get a little out of control, the sheer size of Borat's moustache is about 2-3 times the size of Bautista's. While Borat might say "very nice!", I think it's comparing apples and oranges in the moustache world.

Next we move onto another popular choice, Freddie Mercury. Once again, the thickness and the girth of this stache far exceeds Bautista's, with the only real similarity being the angle of curvature around the face.

Here's everyone's favourite general from Cloud City, Lando Calrissian. So far, this is the closest moustache to Jose Bautista's as far as shape and size of his cookie duster are concerned. It's just unfortunate that Bautista's voice isn't similar to that of the always smooth and sophisticated Billy Dee Williams.

Last but not least, there's Vincent Price. I'll be honest - I had no idea what Vincent Price looked like until Saturday Night Live started doing those sketches with Bill Hader. Price looks more like a Bond villan than anything, but his moustache is somewhat comparable to Bautista's.

So what exactly am I trying to prove by this exercise? I'm not exactly sure. But whether it's for his ability to hit inside fastballs or his ever-changing facial hair choices, Jose Bautista has been extremely exciting to watch this season.

It was funny listening to the radio broadcast last night, Ashby and Howarth were having a hard time figuring out why Jose shaved his beard. They kept talking about not changing facial hair when you are on a roll like Bautista. But not once did they mention that he left the mustache! Well, not that I heard anyway...

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About the Blue Jay Hunter

The Blue Jay Hunter is a blog about the Toronto Blue Jays, which takes a look at the team under the microscope. Mixed in with just a hint of humour, and a shred of dignity. I also have an affinity for baseball moustaches.