appreciationhttp://www.wisebread.com/taxonomy/term/9424/all
en-USThe One Word You Need to Start Using Today to Have a Better Lifehttp://www.wisebread.com/the-one-word-you-need-to-start-using-today-to-have-a-better-life
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<p>Do you want to make today better in an instant? How about making the rest of your life better?</p>
<p>Just start saying &quot;Thanks.&quot; In fact, say it right now. (See also: <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/science-shows-that-saying-thanks-can-improve-your-health-and-happiness?ref=seealso">Science Shows That Saying Thanks Can Improve Your Health and Happiness</a></p>
<p>Look around you, find something you're grateful for, and express that in one word. You don't have to thank a deity. Just saying the word &quot;Thanks&quot; can help you focus on the things that are good in your life &mdash; the ones for which you are thankful &mdash; which can improve your overall outlook.</p>
<h2>Words Have Power</h2>
<p>I've <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/the-one-word-you-need-to-get-rid-of-for-a-better-life">talked before</a> about how words have power. The words we use can affect how we think about things like our feelings as well as how we process abstract concepts, like time and direction. They change how we remember and what we deem important enough to store in our memory.</p>
<p>Given that words have the power to shape our experiences and how we think of them afterwards, it makes sense that we could use them to make our lives better. It also makes sense that some of them would be more suited to this purpose than others.</p>
<p>As it turns out, &quot;Thanks&quot; is one of the very best ones out there.</p>
<h2>Why &quot;Thanks?&quot;</h2>
<p>There are several reasons why &quot;Thanks&quot; is just the word to make life better.</p>
<h3>Gratitude Is Positive</h3>
<p>If you're not feeling great about your life, chances are that you do not have a positive outlook. You may not be intentionally focusing on the difficult parts of your life, spending a lot of time and attention looking at what's wrong.</p>
<p>When you say &quot;Thanks!&quot; you are choosing to look at something that's right. Even if you only say it to your barista in passing, you are noticing a good thing and marking it verbally. Over time, <a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/two-takes-depression/201211/how-gratitude-combats-depression">saying &quot;Thanks!&quot; can help you replace negative thinking with positive.</a></p>
<h3>Gratitude Makes Us Mindful</h3>
<p>In order to say &quot;Thanks!&quot; we have to have our minds focused on the present. That is, we have to be mindful of the present. We have to focus on what is going on here and now, on what other people are bringing into our lives, or on what we already have. Thus, <a href="http://www.elephantjournal.com/2013/11/3-good-things-how-gratitude-heals-dr-paula-watkins/">saying &quot;thanks&quot; is one way to develop mindfulness</a>.</p>
<p>Some people achieve mindfulness via meditation, but sticking with a meditation practice requires time and energy, which you may not have if life is stressful or otherwise difficult. Because saying &quot;Thanks&quot; is something that you can incorporate throughout your day, it is a road to mindfulness that you can follow anytime, anywhere.</p>
<p>Mindfulness increases the density of grey matter in the brain, improves the ways we process pain and difficult or strong emotions, helps us know ourselves more realistically, helps us feel better about our close relationships, improves our ability to focus, <a href="http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/better_eating_through_mindfulness">helps us lose weight</a>, and more. If mindfulness offers all of that and saying &quot;Thanks&quot; is a way to bring us to that state, it's certainly a habit worth cultivating!</p>
<h3>Gratitude Helps You Help Others</h3>
<p>Saying &quot;Thanks,&quot; cultivating gratitude, whatever you call it, <a href="http://www.socialemotions.org/page5/files/Bartlett.DeSteno.2006.pdf">makes you more likely to help other people</a>, even when helping them offers little to no benefit to you, or even causes some detrimental effect to you. When you are thankful for what you have, it seems that you are more willing to give other people things to be thankful for, too.</p>
<p>Helping others, incidentally, is linked to greater health and longevity, less depression, and a greater sense of self-worth. And it can all start with the simple act of saying &quot;Thanks!&quot;</p>
<h2>How to Add &quot;Thanks&quot; to Your Daily Life</h2>
<p>If you're convinced that saying &quot;Thanks&quot; can improve your life, here are some strategies for adding it to your vocabulary.</p>
<h3>1. Decide in Advance</h3>
<p>When you're first working to say &quot;Thanks&quot; more often, it will help you to decide to do it ahead of time. For instance, if you know you'll be stopping for coffee, take a second to think consciously about thanking the barista who takes your order. Even go as far as to envision it happening. Then, be sure to actually say it at the coffee shop. This can help you get into the habit of saying a word that you're not used to using, or to imbuing it with a deeper meaning.</p>
<h3>2. Make a List</h3>
<p>The idea of making a list of things you're thankful for is at least a little cliche, but it's popular because it works. If you're not the type to remember to stop and write down things you're thankful for on a daily basis (I'm not!), set aside some time each week to list a few things. Or, you can put a small section into each day of your calendar, label it &quot;Thanks,&quot; and list things as you go through your day. Take the time to say &quot;Thank you&quot; for each thing, even if it's only silently, and you don't know who you're talking to.</p>
<h3>3. Send a Letter</h3>
<p>Take some <a href="http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2014/02/18/martin-seligman-gratitude-visit-three-blessings/">advice from a gratitude expert</a>. Think of someone in your past who you would like to thank. This can be for anything, from a small kindness to having a great influence on you. Then write them a letter, telling them exactly what you remember and why it meant so much to you, and maybe why you remember it today. Try to meet with the person (or call them, or at least find their mailing address), so you can give them the letter or share it with them in the most personal way possible.</p>
<h3>4. Reward Yourself</h3>
<p>Give yourself a little treat when you remember to say &quot;Thanks!&quot; This doesn't have to be (and probably shouldn't be) anything too big, but <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/the-surprisingly-easy-way-to-change-your-habits-and-your-life">rewarding yourself notes your achievement and takes it seriously</a>. Even if you just draw yourself a smiley face or get to cross off &quot;Say Thanks&quot; in your planner, the reward will encourage you to continue the habit.</p>
<p><em>Any other transformational words &mdash; besides &quot;thanks&quot; &mdash; you've recently added or wanted to add to your vocabulary? Please share in comments!</em></p>
<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/sarah-winfrey">Sarah Winfrey</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/the-one-word-you-need-to-start-using-today-to-have-a-better-life">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-1">
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</div> </div><br/></br>Personal Developmentappreciationgratitudethank youthanksMon, 22 Sep 2014 09:00:03 +0000Sarah Winfrey1216064 at http://www.wisebread.comSilly Sounding, but Simple: Use Your Stuffhttp://www.wisebread.com/silly-sounding-but-simple-use-your-stuff
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<p>I've written before about how <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/help-from-a-former-pack-rat-getting-rid-of-stuff">I'm a reformed (or, at least, reforming) pack rat</a>. Last month, when I was going through bins of old stuff at my parents' house, I rediscovered one of what I deem to be the sadder aspects of my particular pack-ratness &mdash; not using nice things.</p>
<p>In high school, I liked the cartoon &quot;Sailor Moon.&quot; Around that time, I went on vacation with my family to Florida, and I was thrilled to find these awesome, straight-from-Japan Sailor Moon stickers at a toy store. So I bought 'em. I did a lot of letter writing at the time, and I used some of them on letters I mailed to friends.</p>
<p>But the majority of those stickers? When I was home earlier this year, I found them in a bin in the basement. I had thought that they were so nice, so precious, that I had to save them for the perfect time.</p>
<p>The reality is that usually, there isn't a perfect time to use things like this.</p>
<p>It's a lesson I'm still trying to learn. If I get nice things &mdash; things that are high-quality, delicate, or that I just really enjoy &mdash; I want to make sure that they last, and that I enjoy them as much as I can. And I don't think that's a bad urge. Taking good care of items, using those items judiciously, and appreciating the things you have are all important parts of frugality. But there are times even recently when I've taken it too far &mdash; there was the truffle oil from Italy that sat on my shelf for so long, waiting for the right meal, that the rich truffle flavor faded; there was the amazing-looking dress I splurged on that sat in the back of my closet for six months because I feared that I'd spill food all over it (I'm clumsy, so this is not unfounded).</p>
<p>I've been working on enjoying the things I have <em>now</em> &mdash; not &quot;soon,&quot; not when&nbsp;&quot;the time is right.&quot; I've been wearing that dress out on dinner dates. And while the truffle oil may be long gone, the fancy cocktail bitters I received as a gift?&nbsp;I'm always thrilled to mix a drink with them for guests at my apartment.</p>
<p>It's something my mom has been working on as well. I credit her for much of my wonderful frugality, but this mindset is something I might have also picked up from her. She's told me before about the drawer of nice nightgowns she used to have and never wore. I called her while working on this post to ask her about why she didn't wear them. Her answer? &quot;Because they were too nice.&quot;</p>
<p>But, while we were having that conversation, she also told me about how one of her recent basement-emptying jaunts revealed the box of lead crystal glasses my parents received as a <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/alternative-wedding-registry-ideas">wedding gift</a>. She decided to put them into regular household rotation. &quot;I think that's something that's more of my generation,&quot; she said. &quot;You had one set of dishes for everyday, and one set of dishes for company. But it's just so silly [to keep them stored away]. What, are we not good enough for the nice glasses?&quot;</p>
<p>Yup; it is silly to keep them stored away. Here's to enjoying and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/gratitude-and-frugality">appreciating the things we have</a> &mdash; today.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/meg-favreau">Meg Favreau</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/silly-sounding-but-simple-use-your-stuff">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-2">
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</div> </div><br/></br>Lifestyleappreciationdeclutteringpay more for qualityFri, 31 Aug 2012 10:24:42 +0000Meg Favreau952497 at http://www.wisebread.comWhen Something Breaks, Should You Repair or Replace? http://www.wisebread.com/when-something-breaks-should-you-repair-or-replace
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<p>My Grandpa Clyde was one of the great handymen of all time. He could repair just about anything.</p>
<p>Before Clyde bought something, the first thing he'd ask was whether he could get parts and supplies to repair it himself when it broke. If the answer was &quot;no,&quot; he wouldn't buy it. If the answer was &quot;You don't need to worry about it, Mr. Yeager. This will never break,&quot; Gramps would thank the salesman politely and walk away, rather than accuse him of being a bald-faced liar. As Grandpa Clyde was fond of saying, &quot;Automatic means you can't fix it yourself,&quot; and he wanted nothing to do with it.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, times have changed since Clyde's day. We now live in a world of <a href="http://www.thedailygreen.com/environmental-news/latest/planned-obsolescence-460210">planned obsolescence</a> and one in which it costs more to repair most items &mdash; if they can be repaired at all &mdash; than to replace them. That's not only costing us more, but it's a massive waste of the earth's resources. America's nearly 2,000 landfills stand as sad monuments to our throw-away culture.</p>
<p>But sometimes it still pays &mdash; financially, and of course environmentally &mdash; to <a href="http://www.thedailygreen.com/green-homes/latest/repair-things-461109">repair rather than replace</a>, even if you're not as handy as Clyde and have to pay someone else to repair it for you. Here are some rules of thumb about whether to repair or replace. (See also: <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/should-you-repair-a-dripping-faucet">Should You Repair a Dripping Faucet?</a>)</p>
<h3>The 50% Rule</h3>
<p>Financial pundits often talk about the &quot;50% rule&quot; when deciding whether or not it's more cost effective to repair an item rather than replace it. The conventional wisdom was that if a repair was estimated to cost 50% or less than the amount you paid for an item, it was usually better to have it repaired. This is still a good guide to keep in mind, although many consumer products (e.g. electronics, furniture, appliances, even clothing) have continually dropped in price (in inflation adjusted dollars) in recent generations. So now, to be more accurate, the 50% rule should be based on replacement value, not original purchase price, or even on the estimated current market value or resale value of major items like automobiles. Regardless, it's simply one rule of thumb among many other considerations.</p>
<h3>Appreciating Appreciation</h3>
<p>Before you decide to replace something instead of have it repaired, carefully consider whether the item you're thinking about trashing might appreciate in value over time. In the case of a well-made piece of furniture that is likely to become an antique, the choice to repair it is probably obvious. But it may not always be so apparent &mdash; when they needed repair, I wanted so badly to pitch those clunky old stereo speakers my dad passed along to me when I was a teen and buy some trendy new (cheap) ones at Kmart. But Dad wouldn't let me; now those JBL speakers are classics and worth nearly as much as my 401(k) (sadly, in that sense).</p>
<h3>Around the House</h3>
<p>Well-made, older <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/8-ways-to-save-big-on-appliances">appliances</a> may be worth the cost of repair (if you can still find parts and someone to do the work), but you need to factor in that most older appliances use considerably more energy than newer models (see <a target="_blank" href="http://www.energystar.gov/">energystar.gov</a>), so in the end it's often more cost effective to replace them when they need repair. On the other hand, replacing older windows in your home (if they're still in serviceable condition) with more energy efficient ones may not be a smart investment, taking a good many years in most instances to recoup the significant upfront investment. What about the roof over your head? Investing in maintenance and even fairly major roof repairs to prolong the life of a roof &mdash; provided that it's in generally sound condition &mdash; is often more cost effective, particularly for larger roof surfaces.</p>
<h3>Rags or Riches</h3>
<p>When it comes to clothing, the priority should be on taking proper care of it (<a href="http://www.thedailygreen.com/living-green/blogs/save-money/drying-clothes-clothesline-lint-460209">don't use the clothes dryer</a>!) to make it last rather than investing in repairing it. Because most non-designer clothing is relatively inexpensive, it's usually cheaper to buy something new once <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/make-your-clothes-last-longer-without-spending-big">garments become threadbare</a>. Even if you put on a few pounds, tailoring garments usually only makes financial sense with higher-end apparel items, unless you're a seamstress yourself.</p>
<h3>Is It Plugged In?</h3>
<p>A friend of mine who owns an electronics repair business once told me that nearly half of all the items people bring into his shop are simply suffering from a faulty electrical cord, plug, or other connection problem, or something else with a simple fix like cleaning out an air filter or replacing a worn-out belt. If that's the case, then repairing it will save you major currency (get it?). But, if it's something more major and requires special parts, even my friend admits that most new electronics are so inexpensive that it's probably not worth the fix.</p>
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The common line is that it&#039;s better to repair than replace, but that&#039;s not always true. Here&#039;s how to figure out what you should do when something breaks. </div>
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<p style="text-align: left; "><em>This post from the&nbsp;</em><a href="http://www.thedailygreen.com/living-green/blogs/save-money/"><em>Green Cheapskate</em></a><em>&nbsp;by Jeff Yeager is republished with the permission of&nbsp;</em><a href="http://www.thedailygreen.com/"><em>The Daily Green</em></a><em>. Check out more great content from&nbsp;The Daily Green:</em></p>
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<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/jeff-yeager">Jeff Yeager</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/when-something-breaks-should-you-repair-or-replace">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-3">
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</div> </div><br/></br>HomeShoppingappliancesappreciationrepairsreplacing stuffMon, 21 Nov 2011 11:36:18 +0000Jeff Yeager792183 at http://www.wisebread.com25 Ways to Say Thankshttp://www.wisebread.com/25-ways-to-say-thanks
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<p>&quot;Thank you.&quot;</p>
<p>Those two little words (or &quot;thanks&quot; if you want to be quick about it) can mean a lot. Or, depending on how you wield them, they can mean almost nothing. Just like&nbsp;&quot;How are you?&quot; or &quot;I love you,&quot; &quot;Thank you&quot; is a phrase that can hold great weight or have all the heft and permanence of a morning fog.</p>
<p>I've been thinking recently about how I say thank you. Like many people, I was taught growing up that when someone gave me a birthday or Christmas gift, I had to send that person a thank-you note. Writing those notes a child, I don't remember thinking much about how I was actually thankful for the gifts; rather, I considered the process of writing thank-you notes akin to brushing your hair. It wasn't something I wanted to do, but it was one of those things that people just <em>did</em>.&nbsp;</p>
<p>Recently, though, I have both received some thanks that really touched me and wanted to show my appreciation to people in a way that resonated, which led me to compiling the list below. With every single one of these ideas, I would say there are two important things to always keep in mind: Be sincere and show that you care, just as someone recently cared for you.&nbsp;(See also:&nbsp;<a href="http://www.wisebread.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-moron-5-tips-for-giving-better-compliments">You're Doing It Wrong, Moron: 5 Tips for Giving Better Compliments</a>)</p>
<h3>1. Write a Note</h3>
<p>For all of my grumbling about writing thank-you notes as a child, I believe that a considered, personal thank-you note is almost always a great way to show gratitude &mdash; especially if it's written on real, made-from-wood-pulp paper. Saying thanks over email or in an e-card is increasingly prevalent because it's easy. But the effort it takes to make or buy a card, or even just write on a piece of lined paper, shows that you really care.</p>
<h3>2. Give Food</h3>
<p>Sweet or savory, homemade or store-bought, food is always a good way to say thanks. Whether you're making dinner or buying cookies, do what you can to find out what the person you're thanking likes. While the gesture is still, erhm, &quot;sweet,&quot; your thank you will be a little awkward if you make peanut-butter cookies for someone with a peanut allergy.</p>
<h3>3. Clean Something</h3>
<p>A room, a car, a house, a dog &mdash; the gift of your time and elbow grease is a great way to show your appreciation.</p>
<h3>4. Return Items in Better Condition Than When You Borrowed Them</h3>
<p>If someone lent you something, show how much you appreciate it by taking better-than-good care of it. Similarly, if you were given something in borrowed Tupperware, return it with food in it (and I'm not talking about old leftovers).</p>
<h3>5. Say It as a Surprise</h3>
<p>One of the sweetest thanks I ever heard of was from an old college classmate. While we were working in the photo lab one day, she reached in her pocket and pulled out a note her boyfriend had put there for her to find.</p>
<h3>6. Say It in Public</h3>
<p>Everyone likes to be recognized (well, most of the time &mdash; please don't surround me in a circle of clapping waitstaff if I am celebrating my birthday at your restaurant). Whether at work, on your blog, or in front of a group of friends or family, share why you're thankful for the person or people.</p>
<h3>7. Return the Favor</h3>
<p>Performing favors shouldn't be an eye-for-an-eye situation, but if someone gave you a ride, watched your kids, or helped you out in another way, do the same or look for another favor you could do.</p>
<h3>8. Give a Little Gift Card</h3>
<p>Give an unexpected gift card of $5 or $10 to a coffee shop or bookstore. Just don't purchase a little gift card to something like an expensive restaurant. That's like saying, &quot;Thanks, now go spend a lot of your own money to use this gift.&quot; Kind of weird.</p>
<h3>9. Pick Up the Bill</h3>
<p>If you're out for coffee or a meal, pay the tab.</p>
<h3>10. Say It on the Phone</h3>
<p>Hearing someone's voice can be powerful. Call before you email.</p>
<h3>11. Do It Face-to-Face</h3>
<p>Even better than on the phone, say thank you face-to-face. Showing that you're making an effort is touching.</p>
<h3>12. Donate to a Charity</h3>
<p>Instead of spending money directly on the person you'd like to thank, donate that money to the person's favorite charity in his or her name.</p>
<h3>13. Be Happy</h3>
<p>Did someone do something that made you <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/how-to-be-happy">happy</a>? Say it, and show it. There are plenty of other times to whine and worry. Remember to be grateful and enjoy what you were given, and the person will be happy that he was able to brighten your day.</p>
<h3>14. Organize Others</h3>
<p>If you're part of a group thanking an individual or another group, be the one to organize everyone, whether it's all signing a card, pitching in for a gift, or arranging a get-together. Don't wait for someone else to do it. If you're not the person who &quot;should be&quot; in charge of such a rally, reach out to the person who would be (such as a boss) and ask if you can arrange something. There's a good chance that person will agree &mdash; and be thankful someone else it taking care of it.</p>
<h3>15. Give an Award</h3>
<p>This can be as big and serious or as easy and silly as you want. On the easy and silly side, draw a certificate, create a trophy by gluing together thrift-store finds, or buy an award ribbon &mdash; many designs are available for around a dollar at party stores.</p>
<h3>16. Take a Picture</h3>
<p>Snap a picture showing how you're using someone's gift, and send it over in an email or a card.</p>
<h3>17. Make a Recommendation</h3>
<p>If a coworker really came through for you, tell her boss or offer a recommendation on LinkedIn. You might just help her get a raise, promotion, or new job.</p>
<h3>18. Teach a Skill</h3>
<p>Offer to teach something you know, whether it's cooking, knitting, or something less practical but amusing like how to say curse words in another language.</p>
<h3>19. Pay It Forward</h3>
<p>Say thanks by doing something nice for someone else. This isn't the most direct thank you, because you certainly don't want to go reporting your good deed back to the person who did something for you and sound like you're looking for approval.</p>
<h3>20. Make Art</h3>
<p>Find a decorative way to say thanks. This can be as intensive or as easy as you like, from cross-stitching and framing a thank-you note (you crafty person, you), to drawing a doodle that someone could tack up in a cubicle.</p>
<h3>21. Give Flowers</h3>
<p>Flowers are unnecessary, temporary, and certainly not useful &mdash; but that's part of why I love them as a thank-you gift. They're absolutely lovely to have around and an indulgence that most people never purchase for themselves. Plus, since they have a limited life, flowers won't sit around adding to an accumulation of stuff. You can also go the long-lasting route and buy a small potted plant like an African Violet or even an herb for the kitchen.</p>
<h3>22. Ask About Needs</h3>
<p>While it might ruin the element of surprise, asking people what they need also ensures that you're giving them something they really could use.</p>
<h3>23. Give Something Useful</h3>
<p>Too often, thank-you gifts are needless stuff that while appreciated, just tends to accumulate. Instead, say thanks by giving something that can be used. I've received <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/urban-green-reusable-shopping-bags-for-folks-on-the-move">reusable shopping bags</a> as wedding favors, awesome metal water bottles from employers, and a personalized notebook from a friend.</p>
<h3>24. Make Time</h3>
<p>Schedules are hectic. There is always, always something else to do. Simply making time for a person &mdash; to talk, to help out, to even just watch a movie together &mdash; is a great way to show that you care.</p>
<h3>25. Just Say It</h3>
<p>While I love meaningful, considered thanks, be careful not to over-think it. If you hem and haw too long about how to thank someone, there's always the risk that you just won't. Even if it's just an email, or a moment while you walk by in the hallway, let people know how much you appreciate what they did.</p>
<p><em>What is your favorite way to say thanks?</em></p>
<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/meg-favreau">Meg Favreau</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/25-ways-to-say-thanks">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-4">
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</div> </div><br/></br>General Tipsappreciationgift ideasthank you cardsthankfulnessMon, 28 Feb 2011 13:36:33 +0000Meg Favreau495634 at http://www.wisebread.comYou're Doing It Wrong, Moron: 5 Tips for Giving Better Complimentshttp://www.wisebread.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-moron-5-tips-for-giving-better-compliments
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<p>There&rsquo;s no denying that people love words of affirmation. Everyone enjoys being told when they do an exceptionally good job or when they look nice on a special day.&nbsp;</p>
<p>Then again, receiving compliments is a relatively simple and passive experience.&nbsp;Giving legitimate, truly thoughtful, and heartfelt compliments is something else entirely. In an era of instant, faceless communication, the art of giving meaningful compliments might be headed the way of the dodo.</p>
<p>Thought and intention are a big part of the problem. A lot of us regularly offer compliments to friends and loved ones. But those words so easily bleed into the background, tossed out with minimal thought or no real consideration.</p>
<p>A genuine compliment can boost work performance, change a person&rsquo;s outlook on their day, or do countless other things you'll probably never know.&nbsp;Here are few tips for giving genuine, thoughtful compliments.</p>
<h2>Be Sincere</h2>
<p>Don&rsquo;t give a compliment just because you want to be in someone&rsquo;s favor. Others can tell when you are being insincere, which can spell bigger troubles and doubts about your intentions and character. When you give a compliment, make sure that you actually mean your words.</p>
<h2>Avoid the Usual</h2>
<p>Anyone can say &ldquo;good job&rdquo; or &ldquo;nice outfit.&rdquo; These types of generic compliments tend to have little impact on the recipient. When you give a compliment, make sure you wait for the opportune moment and embrace specificity. Choose words that embrace something truly exceptional. Not only will this demonstrate your awareness, but it will also let the recipient know their efforts are noticed and appreciated.</p>
<h2>Consider the Appropriateness</h2>
<p>Not only is being specific important, but choosing the right words can also make a world of difference. Always make sure that the compliments you are giving aren&rsquo;t backhanded or gender-specific. Comments about a coworker's appearance can easily tread into dangerous waters; it's always important to consider the setting and the environment for the compliment.</p>
<h2>Remain Humble</h2>
<p>A compliment is intended to benefit the person who receives it. Once you give someone a compliment, don&rsquo;t repeat yourself until you receive a &ldquo;thank you.&rdquo; Simply give your compliment and politely carry on with your other tasks.</p>
<h2>Be Yourself</h2>
<p>You don&rsquo;t need to put on a big show to give a compliment. &nbsp;All you need to do is be yourself and deliver your compliment in a polite and efficient manner. Giving a compliment without having to become a different person will also make the compliment more sincere.</p>
<p>Delivering great compliments will not only make you feel good, but it will also help brighten the day of others.&nbsp;In a world where everyone seems to always be facing a computer, TV, or phone screen, take the time to let those around you know about the exceptional things they are doing by telling them face to face.</p>
<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/chris-birk">Chris Birk</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-moron-5-tips-for-giving-better-compliments">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-5">
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</div> </div><br/></br>Personal DevelopmentappreciationtalkingthankfulnessThu, 27 Jan 2011 13:36:12 +0000Chris Birk484123 at http://www.wisebread.comHow Wealthy Are You Beyond Your Bank Account?http://www.wisebread.com/how-wealthy-are-you-beyond-your-bank-account
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<p>On my previous article about working to death I found a <a href="/your-work-or-your-life#comment-128956">pretty long comment </a> by a woman named &quot;Jen&quot; who has a husband that works seven days a week to provide for his family. This long and detailed rant sparked several responses saying that Jen is ungrateful for what she has. The comments pointed out many of the non-financial riches Jen has that others would love to obtain. This exchange really made me reflect on how non-monetary things make us rich.</p>
<p>First of all, I think anyone who has a loving family is already quite rich. In the case of commenter Jen, she has two children and an extremely devoted husband and she seems to love them quite a bit. Not everyone is so lucky to be able to find a loving mate, or even have any children. I am grateful to have a family every single day even though we have our own problems and conflicts. No family is perfect, but having a family at all is a great blessing.</p>
<p>Second, as some commenters said, Jen is incredibly lucky to be an American and live in America. When I moved to Hawaii from China I thought that America is incredibly clean and beautiful. When I was in my senior year of high school I realized that because I was a Chinese citizen I had a lot fewer chances for scholarships and even job opportunities. Because of this I remember being jealous of my classmates for the simple fact that they were born in America. Honestly at that time it really pissed me off that so many Americans did not take advantage of the opportunities they had. So I think anyone who is born in a country where they can freely pursue so many choices is ridiculously rich just because they were lucky in birth.</p>
<p>Finally, I think having a healthy body and mind makes a person wealthy. One obvious reason is that health care is quite expensive, and another reason is that as long as you are sound in body and mind you can do something productive and generate money. Unfortunately I think Jen&#39;s husband is suffering in his physical and mental health because of overwork. I agree with Jen that her husband needs to stop this destruction of his being because in the long run he may not be able to work as much and may need medical attention. Personally, I would rather go into debt than slowly wither away in physical and mental health.</p>
<p>For some reason I find that it is much easier for me to complain about what I do not have and it is much harder to be grateful for what I do have. I suppose it is is human nature to always want more. Wealth actually comes from the word &quot;weal&quot;, which means well-being, so I think ultimately it is not our bank accounts that make us wealthy, but our own personal sense of well-being. If you ask yourself what non-financial aspects of your life makes you happy, then you may find that you are more wealthy than you think.</p>
<br /><div id="custom_wisebread_footer"><div id="rss_tagline">This article is from <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/xin-lu">Xin Lu</a> of <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/how-wealthy-are-you-beyond-your-bank-account">Wise Bread</a>, an award-winning personal finance and <a href="http://www.wisebread.com/credit-cards">credit card comparison</a> website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:</div><div class="view view-similarterms view-id-similarterms view-display-id-block_2 view-dom-id-6">
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</div> </div><br/></br>Personal FinanceFamilyLifestyleappreciationlifemoneyFri, 11 Jul 2008 21:38:58 +0000Xin Lu2230 at http://www.wisebread.com