I'm an ex drug user. My anxiety is the reason i used and i'm currently dealing with an elevated level of anxiety. My mind goes over things constantly, and my body reacts. My head says 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441, 4114, 1441, 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441, 1441, 4114, 1441, 4114, 4114, 1441. While this is happening my body jerks in a pre predicted pattern and wont stop until I go over the pattern perfectly in my head. Sometimes its while i'm driving or talking and I can't respond or move on to the next thing until i'm completely finished. If this makes any sense to you please let me know what to do. I'm 31 and I have been dealing with this for about 25 years. I'm extremely embarrased to see a doctor and I'm sure that once my drug use is out in the open I will be shunned away as all drug addicts are. Please help me. Thanks.

congratulations on being an ex-drug user! That very fact should make you feel confident to see a doctor, as you have overcome something very hard!

We are not qualified to diagnose you here, but from what you have written, it really sounds like you may be dealing with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) as it is often characterized by repetitive thoughts or actions that one feels must be done as well as ritualized behavior.

You may want to consider seeing a psychologist to discuss this. It can be helped greatly by Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

Hi masonhenry - firstly please don't be embarrassed about your problem or your drug use. Drug addiction is at an epidemic right now with the narcotic addiction. Doctors are used to seeing all kinds of problems even worse than yours - they won't be judgmental. Its seems you're self medicating as you said. We can't diagnose but I've been here long enough to speculate...its sounds like OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder. Anytime a person feels compelled to do repetitive behavior - this is a symptom of OCD.

This isn't your fault or under your control but you can get better with the right help. Please call your family doctor and explain all your symptoms. The ritual of doing this repetitive behavior is the only way to soothe your anxiety, but obviously its interfering with your life.

A couple years ago, I saw this famous football player with his psychiatrist of a morning show - he had to count to the thousands before doing any task. If he didn't do it correctly, he had to start all over. He was completely dysfunctional from this but he got help and now he's better. This is a manageable problem so please get some help.

I think it might be helpful for you to see a psychologist. A psychologist is a kind of therapist. They are supposed to be non-judgemental. You can phone interview a few to see if they have experience with what you are dealing with. I am NOT a doctor. But it sounds a little like OCD (obsessive, compulsive disorder). It could very well be something else but that is a kind of anxiety disorder that can be very limiting and get out of control easily. The repetition and compulsion that you described is what made it come to mind. However, like I said, I am not a doctor and that is not a diagnosis. See a proper mental health professional for a complete diagnosis. If you interview a few over the phone hopefully you will find one that clicks well with you and you feel will be supportive.

By the way, it is awesome that you are recovered from using drugs. That's great. That is a huge accomplishment and that makes me proud of you. That is the appropriate response that people should have towards you, not make you feel ashamed for past problems or mistakes. You overcame. That means you are a strong person. Congratulations. I am sure you can face this problem head on too. But don't go it alone. Seek out a psychologist to help you.

Kudos to you for getting off the pills that you did. Was wondering if you are on medication for OCD?There is no reason why you should not see a Psychiatrist. I'm sure there is one out there that can help. If you feel so

sensitive about seeing this type M.D.just don't tell the world. Nobody with a brain cell in there head will shun you for having BEEN a drug user, they will applaud the fact that you've overcome it. But in any event it is nobody's business but yours and your psychiatrist. But please get professional psychiatric help. The appropriate medication will enable you to lead an anxiety free life. Please stop worrying about what others are going to think. I repeat I love what you've done for your self except for the one thing you must do seek a Psychiatrists help unashamedly and proudly.

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