music, feminism, spirituality, words and more

April 2015- Scream in, Scream Out, Time for Healing..

by moonlightwrites on April 30, 2015

so how has April been? Well read ahead to find out…

My Key Focuses for 2015

FRIENDSHIP- this has probably been my quietest month so far this year for social activity. Started feeling quite positive as I have mostly been this year but then a week ago my Nan died and my mood has gone plummeting with it. I haven’t done anything social for 2 weeks now and having pangs of friendship loneliness again. Lots of people were very nice when my nan died, and I know they said I could ask for anything I needed, but I guess all I wanted was for someone just to come round and give me a hug and listen for a bit. For some reason I didn’t bring myself to ask for that. I guess I’ve seen others that have gone through similar and they seemed to cope better by being alone. I did get invited to someone’s birthday party and I didn’t go. Now I regret that I didn’t. I think being alone doesn’t work for me. I guess death does cause different feelings and perhaps confusion. (on the day I found out, I was so not with it, I ended up getting lost on a bus)!! On the other hand now I’ve admitted that I’m feeling a bit low, some of my lovely friends are trying to make plans with me which is nice.

FUN- obviously this hasn’t been present much this month either. I did have a really fun day at my friend Sherry’s Soup meeting you can find out more about Southend Soup here. I got lots of free books, read some of my poems, got my face painted and most importantly Miguel pitched there! (he didn’t win but did do very well)

edit: almost forgot the steam fair! That was so much fun!

CREATIVITY AND INSPIRATION- didn’t do so much of this in April. I did get my book proof read though and I wrote a poem for my nan which I will be reading at her funeral next week.

Goals/Aims

To have regular healing clients- had hoped to focus on this during April but I didn’t. I did however have one new client.

To be a supervisor- this died right down this month, I just need my manager to help me finish the training book then I can do the test.

To finish my book- onto the next stage now, got good feedback, the person who read it also offered to put out a few grammatical errors for me but I haven’t heard back yet.

To visit Glastonbury, Gaunts House and Three wishes festival- nothing. I had put some money aside to go to Glastonbury but I ended up using it to buy a ticket to see L7!!

To be better at birthdays- still not been good at this!

go along to street spirit- didn’t do this either..

spend less time on Facebook- I did do this! I came back onto social media but I have changed the way I use it, I didn’t put Facebook or Twitter back on my phone and now when I look I don’t bother to read the whole feed. I just look at the past hour’s posts, messages, notifications and the groups, then come off again.

reconnect with my pagan/witchy side- read one Scott Cunningham book that I wasn’t that keen on

go into nature more- I went for a nature walk every week! I’m now increasing it to twice a week. I really love it when I do.

watch less t.v- probably been watching a bit more this month

get into music again- got excited about a gig for first time in ages! I was at the computer at 9am waiting for the L7 tickets for London to come on sale. So excited I got one!

Things I’ve done this month:

Lovely start to this month as my friend Sherry organised a fundraising meal at the Railway as part of her fundraising efforts for Mind for the Brighton Marathon. you can still sponsor her here

The following evening was the Inspiring Women meeting, there were a lot of new ladies and my friend Lauren came along for the first time.

Miguel and I went with our friends Karen and Trevor, Fiona and John and a few others to a vintage Steam funfair that was on in Chalkwell Park. It was a lot of fun, if a little expensive. I couldn’t go on as many rides as I would have liked but I had lots of fun on the ones I did, we went on the carousel, on the swingboat (which was fun and scary as there were no barriers)! and I went on the swings that spun round really fast and high up in the air, it was like I was flying!

My women’s circle this month was another small one with just 3 of us, but was about happiness and went well. We talked in depth about what makes us happy and challenged ourselves with questions to make us really think about this. Then made a happiness pledge (which I feel like I’m failing at the moment oops)

I went into Leigh on one on my days off with Miguel which was really nice as it was a sunny day and there was no specific plan so it was just enjoyable. We went to a crystal shop, had a juice at a juice bar, explored a graveyard and went to a health shop. On the same day I went to my friend Susan’s with my other friends Fiona and Sara which was nice.

The following day I went for a walk in Chalkwell park with Sara which was really lovely and we hugged a tree!

My friend Lorna has temporarily moved back to Essex so she came to visit one day which was lovely as I hadn’t seen her for ages 🙂

There was Southend Soup- which I mentioned earlier in the post and then it gets quieter. I had a dentist appointment (boo)! and a healing client on the same day (yay).

I went to visit my grandad with my family, I do feel so sad for him. We did get to look at old photos though which was lovely as I saw lots of photos I hadn’t seen of my brother and me before!

Then we get to the present day and I have been doing overtime galore and not much else….