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Why Leaders Need to Forgive and How They Can Do It

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Written by Connie Domino

Published: 20 February 2010

When people think of leaders and forgiveness, many are not thinking of a tool that can create a harmonious, productive, workplace and life. Instead their minds go to one of the many televised confessions of one of our leaders who was caught engaging in a scandalous activity, usually involving sex or money. The bleary eyed leader generally asks for our forgiveness. Being good natured, most of us grant it.

Most leaders do not realize that forgiveness is much more than a desperate act of last resort. It is actually a strategy so powerful it can expedite their grandest dreams and goals. There is a word for forgiveness in every major language. Every major religion and philosophy teaches the importance of forgiveness. Lack of forgiveness can block goals from manifesting in every area of life. It can be the main obstacle blocking a leader's climb to success.

Leaders may be surprised to know that forgiveness is a key to success. Forgiveness is not a nice thing they do for undeserving people. Forgiveness will not only improve a leader's work life, but will allow for goals and dreams to come true.

Leaders can use the 6 Step Technique to improve any relationship and expedite their strategic plan. They can also use these steps to meet business or personal goals.

THE 6 STEP TECHNIQUE

The 6 Step Technique utilizes affirmative goal setting and visualization, a potent combination with quick results. This example involves a leader improving a business relationship with an employee (Rhoda).

Step 1: You choose a focus area. When writing a forgiveness goal, your area is relationships. All forgiveness involves a relationship, with yourself or others.

Step 2: You must write a goal affirmation for any relationship you wish to improve. All the words must be positive and forward moving. The affirmation must be written as if the goal has already come true and must include a goal date.

Example: My relationship with my employee, Rhoda now has the following qualities:

Basic respect Cooperation Team Work, etc.

by: a goal date for manifesting.

Step 3 A: You make a list of why your relationship goal hasn't already come true. This list of excuses will show you what is blocking your goal from manifesting. Then you write by each block how it makes you feel. For example, if your block is "My employee Rhoda is always complaining, calling in sick and missing deadlines." Your affirmation is "Rhoda is now healthy, happy and well and completes her work on time."

Step 3 B: In the privacy of your home, you state an affirmation of forgiveness for the person (Rhoda) you wish to forgive. You do not need to contact them or get them involved. The Forgiveness Affirmation will unblock energy so that your goal can come true. You bring the person's higher self into your mind's eye. You have a conversation with the person's higher self or soul letting them know that you forgive them completely and freely, and you release them, and release the incident that happened between you, and you hold them in the light. When you have completed your forgiveness affirmation, you visualize the person accepting it .

Keeping Rhoda in your mind's eye, you will have a soul to soul conversation with her higher self. A person's higher self will not judge you, so you can pour your heart out. Begin by describing the problem and how it makes you feel. Second, describe the solution. Third, explain to them the consequences if their behavior doesn't change. Visualize the person's higher self accepting what you have said and then walking out a door or off a stage.

Step 4: You create a "To Do" list. List all the actions you plan to take to manifest your relationship goal. First, you will say your relationship affirmation listed in Step 2 a minimum of three times a day. Next, you will complete Step 3. You should say your affirmation for blocks two to three times a day. Also, complete your forgiveness work. If there are other actions you wish to take to better your relationship with Rhoda, you can list them as well.

Step 5: You will watch for synchronicities that tell you your goal is on its way. For example, Rhoda attends the weekly staff meeting and for the first time doesn't complain.

Step 6: Write the date your goal manifested or how you felt about it. I know leaders who used this affirmative goal setting technique and reported the employee they had been having trouble with actually came to them and offered to mend their relationship.

Be ready for the positive changes in your life. Tapping into the Law of Forgiveness is one of the most powerful strategies for positively affecting a difficult relationship and manifesting your goals.

Connie Domino, MPH, RN, author of The Law of Forgiveness: Tap into the Positive Power of Forgiveness -- And Attract Good Things to Your Life, is a nationally acclaimed life coach, trainer, registered nurse, support group facilitator, motivational speaker, and educational counselor who teaches public health nursing at the University of North Carolina.

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