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10 Things I love About Winter

It’s fucking cold out there people. It has been snowing in Prague pretty much non stop for a week now and everyone has got something to say about it. The public transit shut down for an evening, I have to dress (and undress) 25 kids everyday and take them to play in it, and sure everything “looks” pretty but everything is actually just wet and cold. That’s the bad news.

But being a native Californian I decided to try and find some positive thing about winter – a season that for all intents and purposes I know nothing about. A California winter is a little lack luster. So, without further ado, my list of things I love about winter.

Winter Hats – I love knit caps. I love the way they keep my ears from getting cold and I love the way they fit to my head. I have one with a skull and kitty cat ears. The winter cap is colorful or black, it is adorned with pom-poms or just plain. There is one for every mood.

Mulled Wine & Hot Chocolate – Here in Prague you can’t get far in the winter without bumping into a mulled wine stand. Hooray. And hot chocolate is just proof that there is indeed a god.

Snowball Fights – You can have your snowmen, I’ll take a good snowball fight any day. Perhaps its the fact that I get to throw them at little people.

My Heater – We don’t have dryers here in Prague. During the winter months my heater works as a dryer. I am actually able to wash a pair of jeans and wear them later that night. (Insert angelic choir sound here)

Chaka Khan-ika – I was going through a divorce right at Christmas time a few years back. It sucked. All the love and goo in the air made me wanna punch Santa in the gullet. My best friend was also going through a break up. We decided to make a new holiday that celebrated all the best traditions of the season and call it Chaka Khan-ika – named after the fabulous funk diva. The tag is “It’s that Jewish Holiday with a Disco flare!”. All you need to do in order to celebrate this holiday is – wake up late Christmas morning and have a lot of sex. Then watch a few old animated classics dedicated to the season. Next, you hop on down to your favorite Chinese place and get you some Peeking Duck. After you eat you go to a movie. Or two. The day ends with you in a dark bar having a few whiskeys. It’s awesome. Feel free to celebrate, just remember who invented it.

Warmth – I am not a summer person. I would much rather be cold. I hate sweating. I like winter because I can bundle up. I can hide under my comforter. I can wear scarves around my entire face. I can get warm. This I like.

Paid Holiday – As I said, I don’t really care all that much for Christmas, but thank god others do. This city practically shuts down in December because everyone goes out of “The Prague” for the holidays. This means my school is closed. This means I don’t have to work for two weeks – Paid!

Care Packages – In this country, the care package is king. And with them usually comes Kraft Mac N Cheese.

Christmas Movies – Not the new crap. I am talking about the good stuff. Charlie Brown, A Christmas Story, The Grinch, Bad Santa, (I have a crush on Billy Bob) A Muppet Christmas Carol. These are reasons to celebrate the season.

I hope this little list was useful, or at least amusing. Get warm and have a happy winter!