If you drafted Manny this year, then you better make a new plan, Stan because Man-Ram is getting time off for bad behavior. 50 games to be exact. The reason – he came up positive for human chorionic gonadotropin, or HCG, which can be used to boost testosterone levels. Manny seems to be claiming his doctor prescribed it for erectile dysfunction but the drug is most often prescribed for…women’s fertility. Huh? And here we thought Alyssa Milano was the only person in the LA Dodger clubhouse taking those. Maybe Manny got screwed by a bad boner doctor but our money is on Scott Boras. He probably gave those pills to Manny, told him they were Flintstone vitamins, and Manny hallucinated Flintstone faces onto the vitamins.

So what are the fantasy implications besides crying if you own him and picking from the FA scraps? Juan Pierre is going to get the lion’s share of playing time in the outfield. With Hudson and Ethier hitting so well at the top and Torre always going back to Furcali as his leadoff hitter, the only question is whether he bats Pierre 8th or 9th (tonight it was the 9th). This is a pretty good move if you’re a Pierre owner as he’d get bunted over by the pitcher if he hit 8th but will steal from the 9th slot (got one today). As for whether this affects the production of O-Dog and Andre Ethier, time will tell. You’d have to think that O-Dog’s runs and Ethier’s RBIs are going to down because of this. Interestingly, Torre moved up Ethier to #3 and hit Loney #4. Our guess would be that he goes back to his beloved lefty/righty/lefty/righty order and separates Ethier and Loney with either Martin or Kemp. Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Matt Cain – 6 IP, 1 Hit, 5 walks, 7 Ks. His walks are up, his Ks are down, his homers are up. None of this spells, “Yay.” His BABIP is near his norms but his men left on base is higher than it’s been for the last couple of years. His ERA is under 3 but it should be over 5. Like Minnie Pearl, I’m going to give this to you plain and simple, he needs to cut down on his walks. But it’s still early, Cain has time to correct his problems.

Randy Wolf – 6 IP, 1 ER, 5 Ks. 3.59 ERA on the year and five consecutive no decisions. Why can’t I get a win? Who have I wronged? Was it the old lady who yelled at me in the post office calling me Prince Charles? Cause if it was her, I’m sorry. She was up next. I just told her you’re up, I wasn’t rushing her!

Jordan Zimmermann – 6 IP, 6 ER, 4 Ks. ‘nn settled down after being Kemp’d in the first. Unfortunately, this takes some of the shine off of ‘nn so it’ll make it harder for you to flip him.

Joe Beimel – Vin Scully, “The Nats are without a closer so they’re trying out Beimel in the role.” He said that as Beimel pitched the 8th in a four run game. Of course he’s pitching the eighth! It makes perfect sense. I’m currently pulling my mustache hair out.

Casey Kotchman – First homer of the season yesterday as he bats .313 on the season. Might be startin’ somethin’. Then again, the Braves are facing a lefty tomorrow. Okay, Saturday’ll be startin’ somethin’.

Kendry Morales – In my series of “yawnstipating 1st baseman who won’t get drafted but should” posts, I targeted Morales. He just hit his 5th homer. I am Prince Charles!

Hanley Ramirez – 2 HRs yesterday. For the longest time the ‘lins were threatening to put some reins on Hanley’s running. He’s sitting on 3 steals and 4 caught stealings.

Derrek Lee – Sat out 2nd straight game but said the injury was “no big deal.” Oh. Okay. Then how about you play?

Bengie Molina – 2 HRs and 4 RBIs yesterday. Brings his totals to 7 HRs and 27 RBIs. The rest of the Giants have 9 HRs and 84 RBIs. Step away from the buffet, Molina, and let Fred get some grub.

Dexter Fowler – 0-for-3 yesterday and has been terrible since he lit Razzball aflame with his 5 steal game. Icarus Fowler?

Jered Weaver – A complete game win with 8 Ks and 3 baserunners. A HR by Aaron Hill spoiled the shutout. Won’t be surprised if he ends up with 15 Wins, a 3.50 ERA, and 175 Ks. As long as big bro Jeff doesn’t drive up north to teach him how to flatten his slider.

Mark Buehrle – 8 IP, 0 ER and is 5-0 on the year. Maybe I should’ve drafted him in a league. Back in my top 80 starters post, I wrote, “He’s not flashy with those Big City Ks. You probably won’t want to own him. But for the better part of two years, I’ve owned him off and on. He’s usually good for a few ‘worth-owning’ streaks a year.” So far this year it’s obviously been one of those “worth-owning streaks.”

Joakim Soria – Got the save, but gave up two hits, two walks and one run after giving up an unearned run his first time back. I’d hold Juan Cruz for now if you have room. And who doesn’t have room for Juan Cruz, he’s like a buck-twenty soaking wet.

Rick Ankiel – To the DL. This boosts Rasmus’s value a bit (but he already had some value).

Alex Rodriguez – Due back on Friday. But don’t look here. Look back at Manny.

Anibal Sanchez – Left game with shoulder discomfort. Not good, home slice. But neither are any of his stats.

Clete Thomas – I love managers that remove a top of the lineup hitter then just shove some other schmohawk in their place. “Clete. I like that name. Like the things at the bottom of a baseball shoe. You hit 3rd, Clete.” If Spike Owen came out of retirement, he’d hit 4th.

Hanrahananananan, Beimel or Bailey? At the moment i own Beimel, but Hanrahananananan and Bailey are available. I’m thinking about picking up Bailey for Beimel. Good Move?

And the last days i read a couple of times, that Scott Kazmir is a strong sell (talkin about his controll issues, lost velocity and a possible DL stint), but i really thought he will be a nice pitcher. 3.50 ERA many K’s and some Wins. Should i really sell him? I already have an offer: Davis + bunch a practice balls for Kazmir and Khalil Greene. Already got Zimms at 3rd base, but as i often said, i don’t really trust him.

What is with these base stealers these days? They steal a half dozen bags in a game and then take the rest of the month off. They’re getting like boxers who fight once every year. Is it so exhausting to run 90 feet 5 times that you need to recoup until the next time Chris Young pitches?

Fowler, you’re no good to me going 4/20 with 2 runs and an RBI (0 SB) in 7 days. How about a bag every second night? It’s called pacing yourself Snitches.

I suppose I’ll try Pierre for awhile.

Meanwhile, I received a call from Rickey Henderson:

“This is Rickey calling on behalf of Rickey. These other clowns put the ickey in Rickey. Bring me back.”

D. Lee owner in my league might be interested in a Votto/Jurrjens for Peavy or Votto/Wandy for Peavy. I have Ryan Howard at first and way too many OFs (Kemp, Rios, Hart, Ellsbury, Bruce–and I can’t seem to move one for a SP in my league) for 3 OF and 1 Util slot. So usually I end up with 2 of the OFs on my bench and Votto in my Util slot. I have also have Haren, Wainwright, Weaver and Hughes as SPs (and Lackey on DL right now). Good trade for me?

@ScoutAbout: Votto for Peavy straight up would be enough in my eyes? Throwing in a Jurjjens or Wandy is too much. I think votto is too much! Is he tempting you saying Votto has the swine?

@knighttown: I’d deal Bruce for Rios. A guy in my league tried offering me Rios for my Holliday. Holliday is TOO MUCH, and I think Bruce might be just right. You’re probably giving up some dongers, but gaining in AVG and SB’s. Depends on your needs. And I just traded Rodney for ALEXIE in my 12 team H2H league, very compeitive too… I don’t think Alexie hits like this for very much longer, 2-3 more weeks? I’d sit if i was you or you’re gonna be just like that guy i dealt rodney too! Looking like a fool! It took Alexie til May 27th to hit last year, its only May 7th, its cold up here in the north still….. give it time daniel son…..

@Bob from Germany: I’d wait another day or two to see how the Nats… oh, hell, I’d kick Beimel to the curb and take Bailey. IT’S THE NATS. Not exactly the Gold Coast of save opportunities.

I like Soria but he smells injured.

I like Mariano but he smells done. Or, at least, closing in on done. It had to happen someday. If you own him, wait for two clean saves, then sell.

I don’t like the Yankees, and am enjoying the Yankeefreude. And the Mannyfreude.

@knighttown: I need steals. I dropped JUpton for Fowler. Now I dropped Fowler for Pierre. I went from JUpton to JPierre. Let’s not talk about it. Thankfully, neither are starters for me.

@knighttown: Both of those are doable. Depends on needs. But remember to Respect The Bruce. As Cisco once sang, “Donk-donk-donk-donk-donk.”

Yesterday I traded Vernon Wells and Kevin Gregg to get Matt Holliday, after avoiding Holliday in the draft like swine flu. This is what’s known as a classic two-fer, kids.

On the one hand, I swapped my 12th and 19th picks for a 3rd round pick. That’s good. On the other hand, every scary prognostication about Matt’s Holliday from Coors may be coming true. That’s bad. Still, I think it’s a good deal. Feel free to tell me otherwise.

The owner I did it with sent another offer (Hardy for Gallardo — uh, nope) this morning, which means he either a) is pleased and thinks I’m a sucker, and wants to come back for another round or b) is having trader’s remorse and wants to equalize the trade with another deal that’s more in his favor.

@ScoutAbout: You give Votto/Jar-Jar and get Peavy? With your lineup, I’d do that trade. Give what you have, get what you need! Everybody happy!

@Tony: Let’s start a Friends of Holliday support group. Repeat after me: He’s going to be just fine. He’s back to his old leg-kick batting stance. He gets to play half his games outside of Oakland’s yawning abyss…. om….om…. om…..

May 8th, 2009 at 4:57 am
J-UP stays hot with a 2 for 4 and 1 SB. Lexie picking splinters.
But the biggest revelation I had last night reviewing my roster, Johnny Damon has become a “Must Start” when playing at home!

@Baron Von Vulturewins: I’m down. I’m not trading him away while value is low. I’ll ride the Holliday USS down to the bottom of the ocean if i have to. Whoever posted the foul ball outs he’s made this year playing in OAK was kinda scary yesterday i think? That foul territory is taking the bat outta his hands… I guess he just needs to drive the damn ball more! It seems to be coming around a little, a few dongers lately….!

@Tony: Yes, given that one week and four saves ago Gregg had basically no trade value whatsoever, I felt pretty comfortable making a Vernon Wells-for-Holliday upgrade.

Now to scour the wires for junky closer replacements… on Beimel! On Cruz! On Hanrahan! On Ray!

Best part of the trade was that the other guy said he “needed a stopper.” Ah, that took me back…. it’s been a long time since I heard a closer called a “stopper.” Rolaids Fireman of the Year Award, here I come!

I have sexy alexei and I’m hoping that Stevie Nix will stop hitting HRs soon. I’m sitting tight with Alexei, but to hold the empty ss spot, I picked up callaspo.

I was just offered Tejada and Aaaaardsma for Qualls. I really don’t like Tejada, but is Qualls just mediocre enough to make this trade good for me? The guy who offered the trade also has Bartlett and Scutaro (with ARod coming back he no longer needs Scutaro). And I also have Bell and Hawkins. Any advice on a counter-offer?

Marlins are calling up one of their top prospects, Chris Coghlan, he has been playing 2B in Triple-A and absolutely destroying the baseball. He was originally a 3B in college but shifted to 2B in the minors. I was reading some Marlin blogs this morning and they believe he can play some 3B-2B and even OF. He stole 34 bases last year in Double-A, walks a fair share, and doesn’t strike out a lot.

Maybe this guy comes out of nowhere the way Uggla did a few years ago?

Last night I went to the Mississippi Braves – Tennessee Smokies doubleheader. Ryne Sandberg is the manager for the Smokies. The stadium was mostly empty by the time the second game started (the first game went into extra innings), so my friends and I moved down to the third base line front row, and every time the Smokies were batting, Ryno would come out to coach third base.

We yelled our heads off…”RYNO WE LOVE YOU”…..”YOU’RE THE GREATEST RYNO!”…….at one point I looked up his page on my Blackberry and started calling out his career statistics and achievements to him.

He flat stonewalled us. Wouldn’t turn his head, wouldn’t look at us, wouldn’t acknowledge that of the 300 people remaining in the stadium, 8 of them were 20 feet away from him, yelling his name. I found this a little frustrating, so in my slightly inebriated state (did I mention it was Thirsty Thursday?), I waited until the stadium was quiet, and then at the top of my lungs, yelled:

“Hey Ryne — just answer me this: Who was cooler? Mark Grace or Mickey Morandini? Could you get me Mickey’s autograph?”

I’d love to finish the story by saying that this brilliant comment produced a smile or even a glance, but I’ve got to hand it to him — he didn’t budge.

so mark reynolds made it easier for me to drop him today, as ARod comes in to take his roster spot. I’m gonna hang on to Ian Stewart and LaPorta, since manny is out w fertility issues. Stewart is at 9 games started at 2B, so that’ll be nice to spell Howie when he gets to 10. any WW guys that are on the DL that would be worth stashing in my now empty DL slot?

In one of my 20 man long term keeper leagues, I traded last week Carl Crawford and Mike Fontenot for Manny and Adam LaRoche because I had like 20 steals every week and was starving for power (a problem I had since last year).

@Baron Von Vulturewins:
Bruney is the obvious choice, but he is hurt too… Plus, his career doesn’t indicate that he is closing material. I know internally, they think Melancon is the closer of the future. His stuff is actually quite sick. His breaking pitch — not sure if it’s a change in on righties — drops off the face of the planet. That said, he was horrible his last two outings. I think he walked three and a row and was pulled.

So that was a long-winded clue of saying I have no idea.
IF Mo is hurt bad AND Wang comes back, I think Wang (or Kennedy) start and Joba closes.

I’m in desperate need of SP in my keeper league and and lead in 4 of 5 offensive categories even with Bossman Jr. pooping the bed. I’m thinking about dealing him and Scott Baker for Ellsbury (SB is the one offensive category I dont lead) and Bedard. Mistake??

@ichirosan: If it’s any consolation, it’s not really a screw-up, because you couldn’t have seen this coming. Dropping Josh Beckett to pick up Scott Richmond is a screw-up. This is just getting screwed.

That said, you should probably remove your belt and shoelaces, and stay away from light sockets.

@RT: Interesting theory, re: Joba. I think you’re exactly right. If Mo goes down for two weeks, they probably go committee/Melancon. If Mo’s out for a few months or the season, it’s Joba to the pen.

@Falcon: Why would someone drop him in a competitive league? Trade him or drop him, doesn’t really matter…..just depends on if you can handle using up a bench slot, and if you can get a valuable piece in return.

Is Damon and Rios too much to give up for a 1B like Teix, Prince, or Fielder (a top tier guy)? It’d leave my OF with both Upton brothers and Elijah Dukes. My current 1Bs are the sucktastic Adam LaRoche and Conor Jackson

@Baron Von Vulturewins:
Agreed.
As much as they have not admitted it publicly, internally, Hughes is their #3. Legit. CC, Burnett, Hughes is a solid 1, 2, 3. Add Petitte and Wang (yeah Wang) and that rotation will be ok.

Funny you should talk about Cain and Weaver in the same post, because so far this year Weaver = Cain with about half the walks. Both have about average K rates, both give up tons of fly balls, and both usually manage to get away with fewer home runs than you’d expect. Unless there’s good reason to expect that their deep fly balls won’t leave the park (and Jered’s been looking pretty homeschooled this year, so that might have something to do with it), both are due to give up more donks than in years past, but at least Weaver’s likely to have fewer men on base when that happens.

@Falcon: i traded fernando rodney for alexie, i like to repeat that as many times as possible…. uggla is alright, but overall if alexie comes back and hits you’re golden, if he doesn’t you got hosed, big risk i think…..

@knighttown: In case you need another reason to respect the BRUCE, here’s one:

If Bruce had the same batting average on balls in play as he did last year (which was still waaaaaaaaay below what he managed in the minors), he’d be hitting .294 right now. And that’s me quoting a spreadsheet I made in my mother’s basement!

That’s the magic of regression — it always works, except for when it doesn’t.

@Tony: I was the one who posted about Holliday’s foul outs, and I scared myself in the process. But it’s so early in the season, you can find a “trend” to focus on to prove any point you want to. Here’s another one that’s a bit more reassuring:

So far this year, Holliday’s actually hitting better at home than on the road (lower AVG, but higher OBP and SLG). Remember how last year people talked about how he did better over time in away games as he adjusted to hitting at sea level? Maybe this year he just needs time to adjust to not adjusting.

@everyone: I just pulled the trigger and sent BJ Upton and Scott Baker over for Ellsbury and Bedard. Needed pitching badly and the extra SB will be nice.
ITs a keeper and I already have Reyes, MCab, and Longoria so I figured I could afford to deal Upton’s elite talent for pieces that will help me win now.
Reassure me?

thats awesome for the 10th place dude he’s getting hanley, but he’s also giving up TULO who is gonna heat up eventually, ludwick is solid, and Kaz is solid on one of the best teams in baseball… Honestly I can’t figure why the 4th place team wants to deal Hanley? Who are you thinking is getting the best side, because there’s no way in toledo this is vetoeable.

Just some credence for you to borrow regarding Bannister: K/9 of 5.18, BB/9 of 4.07, BABIP .237, LOB% 80.4. His LD% is relatively low (16%), but a drastic correction is coming soon. Or I will eat these numbers.

Felt like popping my comment cherry since I am always lurking at this site. 8 x 8 H2H League (2B,3B,OBP – Losses, BB, CG are the 6 added). I feel like this is a no brainer but I’d be getting Carlos Lee for Atkins and Maholm. I can make the Lee trade now or do I risk waiting a little and go for same type of trade for Soriano? Thanks fellas

@Grey – I find it somewhat incredible how much Razzball time is consumed on discussing the Nats chaotic closer situation, all for the possibility of grabbing one or two of those 3 saves on the season. If Fowler is Icarus, the Nat closer situation is Tantulus.

I was watching a ballgame the other day, when the announcer stated that Mike Napoli had the highest home run per at bat rate of any catcher in history to hit over 50 dingers. His rate is a tad over 1 for 15 at bats.

Who is Cla Merideth? I recognize the names of the vast majority of ML players, but not him. Pelfrey, despite pitching mediocre at best, with seemingly his last strike out last September, is also 4-0. I hate wins as well. Every owner of Jobucum has to hate wins, and I have him in 3 leagues.

Question – Are any or all of these players now disposable – Mike Aviles, Brett Myers, Jordan Zimmerman? And is it worthwhile picking up Homer Bailey at this time?

I mentioned this yesterday, but talks have moved a little more. I only have Andrus at short, and was offered Furcal for Nelson Cruz. Swisher is currently on my bench and Choo is in the UT slot. Think its worth considering?

Is the interest in Andrew Bailey here mostly due to the belief that he might get saves, or is it also because it is thought that he will continue to post great numbers all-around? I’m interested in him, but I can’t find too many detailed scouting reports and his minor league numbers aren’t very noteworthy.

@PJTres: yahhh he’s getting the best talent no deal…. just trying to show you alot of guys that are hot/good for the two best players in the deal. IN a keeper league where you’re keeping what 6? its not a good deal….

In a 12 Team Mixed 5 x 5 Keeper League I’m looking to maybe trade a solid pitcher for some hitting help. My rotation is Santana, Lincecum, Cueto, Beckett & Jackson, with Parra and D. Price on my bench. Would a Beckett for Cruz be OK……. or should I be looking for something better? My OF is Bay, Hawpe, Rios, Matsui & Morales (with Teahen, Del, Young on the bench). I’m also tempted to go after Wright, or Quentin or Adam Jones……. I feel like I can afford to let a solid pitcher go, I just need to target the right hitter………… I’d appreciate your thoughts…….!! Thanks

Re: Alexei. You’ve all probably seen this already, but … courtesy of Rototimes:

Guillen said, “I am not putting this kid on the bench because I am crazy or we are losing. I put him on the bench because all my coaching staff was thinking the same way I was thinking. He is going to be back in the lineup. If I see him the same way, we will make a drastic decision and see what happens.”

So I need pitching bad, and I’ve got tons of hitting/lots of OFs (Beltran, Crawford, Ibanez, Hunter, Cameron and Guerrero on the DL). I’ve been offered Haren and Swisher for Webb and Beltran. I know I could end up with the short end of the stick for both players, but is it worth considering the deal? Webb’s gone for another month, and who knows what he’ll be like when he gets back…

@anon: I traded Rios and Adrian Beltre for Lance Berkman a few days ago in my 16-team league. At this point, I’d say that Damon’s value is much higher than Beltre’s. So if you’re willing to gamble that the Big Puma won’t be hitting .200 at season’s end (and I’d say that’s a pretty good bet), you probably could acquire him for much less than Tex, Howard, or Fielder would demand.

And everyone seems keen on dealing Votto…is he really over-performing? I’ve got him at 1st in a deep 12 team keeper league, should I attempt to deal to get something better?

I’ve got a lot of mediocreish starters (Baker, Galarraga, Jered Weaver, Brett Meyers, Guthrie)…so I’m decent in wins, Ks, and QSs but getting killed in ERA and WHIP…maybe attempt to package Votto and one of those guys for someone elite…then I’d be stuck with Konerko at 1st.

Hey all. Mid-day trade question. I give up shields and I recieve a b.j upton. My hitting is ok and so is my pitching, deal worth making? Also what to do with atkins? Would love to trade him, but is there even a market for this schmuck? Thanks for the help

@Teef: Nice work, Teef! It’s confirmed what I’ve suspected. It’s not just random luck that’s kept his avg down, but it’s also not anything that he shouldn’t be able to work his way out of. There’s no evidence of a major decline in skills, and that’s what matters.