Monster: A Novel

Meet Monster. Meet Judy. Two humans who don't like each other much, but together must fight dragons, fire-breathing felines, trolls, Inuit walrus dogs, and a crazy cat lady - for the future of the universe.

Gil's All Fright Diner

Duke and Earl are just passing through Rockwood county in their pick-up truck when they stop at the Diner for a quick bite to eat. They aren't planning to stick around-until Loretta, the eatery's owner, offers them $100 to take care of her zombie problem. Given that Duke is a werewolf and Earl's a vampire, this looks right up their alley.But the shambling dead are just the tip of a particularly spiky iceberg.

Helen & Troy's Epic Road Quest

Witness the epic battle of the cyclops! Visit the endangered dragon preserve! Please, no slaying. Solve the mystery of The Mystery Cottage, if you dare! Buy some knickknacks from The Fates! They might come in handy later. On a road trip across an enchanted America, Helen and Troy will discover all this and more. If the curse placed upon them by an ancient god doesn't kill them or the pack of reluctant orc assassins don't catch up to them, Helen and Troy might reach the end their journey in one piece, where they might just end up destroying the world.

Too Many Curses

The wizard Margle the Horrendous takes special pride in never killing his enemies. Instead, he transforms them into various accursed forms and locks them away in his castle. It's Nessy's duty to tend this castle. Its a lot of work, but she manages, taking pride in housekeeping talents that keep the castle from collapsing into chaos. But when Margle suddenly dies, everything begins to unravel.

The Automatic Detective

Even in Empire City, a town where weird science is the hope for tomorrow, it's hard for a robot to make his way. It's even harder for a robot named Mack Megaton, a hulking machine designed to bring mankind to its knees. But Mack's not interested in world domination. He's just a bot trying to get by, trying to demonstrate that he isn't just an automated smashing machine, and to earn his citizenship in the process. It should be as easy as crushing a tank for Mack, but some bots just cant catch a break.

Chasing the Moon

Diana's life was in a rut - she hated her job, she was perpetually single, and she needed a place to live. But then the perfect apartment came along. It seemed too good to be true - because it was. As it turns out, the apartment was already inhabited - by monsters.

Emperor Mollusk Versus the Sinister Brain

Emperor Mollusk. Intergalactic Menace. Destroyer of Worlds. Conqueror of Other Worlds. Mad Genius. Ex-Warlord of Earth. Not bad for a guy without a spine. But what's a villain to do after he's done... everything. With no new ambitions, he's happy to pitch in and solve the energy crisis or repel aliens invaders should the need arise, but if he had his way, he'd prefer to be left alone to explore the boundaries of dangerous science. Just as a hobby, of course. Retirement isn't easy though.

A Nameless Witch

Being born undead can have its disadvantages, such as eternal youth and flawless beauty-things most unsuitable for a witch. Hiding behind the guise of a grimy old crone, the witch is content living outside Fort Stalwart with her unlikely band of allies: a troll named Gwurm, an enchanted broom, and a demonic duck named Newt. She leads a simple life filled with spells, potions, and the occasional curse.

The Book of Ralph

A message appears on the moon. It is legible from Earth, and almost no one knows how it was created. Markus West leads the government's investigation to find the creator. The message is simple and familiar. But those three words, written in blazing crimson letters on the lunar surface, will foster the strangest revolution humankind has ever endured and make Markus West wish he was never involved.

The Last Adventure of Constance Verity

Constance Verity has been saving the world since she was seven, and she's sick of it. She sets off on one last adventure to reset her destiny and become the one thing she's never been: ordinary. Ever since she was granted a wish at birth by her fairy godmother, Constance Verity has become the world's great adventurer. She is a master of martial arts and a keen detective and possesses a collection of strange artifacts. Constance has spent the past 28 years saving the world, and she's tired of it.

Run Program

What's worse than a child with a magnifying glass, a garden full of ants, and a brilliant mind full of mischief? Try Al, a well-meaning but impish artificial intelligence with the mind of a six-year-old and a penchant for tantrums. Hope Takeda, a lab assistant charged with educating and socializing Al, soon discovers that day care is a lot more difficult when your kid is an evolving and easily frightened A.I.

Off to Be the Wizard

It's a simple story. Boy finds proof that reality is a computer program. Boy uses program to manipulate time and space. Boy gets in trouble. Boy flees back in time to Medieval England to live as a wizard while he tries to think of a way to fix things. Boy gets in more trouble. Oh, and boy meets girl at some point.

Jim &#34;The Impatient&#34; says:"IT WOULD BE IDYLLIC, IF NOT FOR THE CORPSES"

We Are Legion (We Are Bob): Bobiverse, Book 1

Bob Johansson has just sold his software company and is looking forward to a life of leisure. There are places to go, books to read, and movies to watch. So it's a little unfair when he gets himself killed crossing the street. Bob wakes up a century later to find that corpsicles have been declared to be without rights, and he is now the property of the state. He has been uploaded into computer hardware and is slated to be the controlling AI in an interstellar probe looking for habitable planets.

Miniatures: The Very Short Fiction of John Scalzi

The ex-planet Pluto has a few choice words about being thrown out of the solar system. A listing of alternate histories tells you all the various ways Hitler has died. A lawyer sues an interplanetary union for dangerous working conditions. And four artificial intelligences explain, in increasingly worrying detail, how they plan not to destroy humanity. Welcome to Miniatures: The Very Short Fiction of John Scalzi.

Monster Hunter International

Five days after Owen Zastava Pitt pushed his insufferable boss out of a 14th story window, he woke up in the hospital with a scarred face, an unbelievable memory, and a job offer. It turns out that monsters are real. All the things from myth, legend, and B-movies are out there, waiting in the shadows. Some of them are evil, and some are just hungry. Monster Hunter International is the premier eradication company in the business. And now Owen is their newest recruit.

Where the Hell is Tesla?: A Novel

I found the journal at work. Well, I don't know if you'd call it work, but that's where I found it. It's the lost journal of Nikola Tesla, one of the greatest inventors and visionaries ever. Before he died in 1943, he kept a notebook filled with spectacular claims and outrageous plans.

Villains Rule: The Shadow Master, Book 1

Hi, how are you? Yes, I am talking to you, the reader of this book's description. Okay, I get it, fourth-wall breaking is overdone. Get over it. This book, Villains Rule, is a fantasy action-comedy which you have to hear. Not because it redefines the genre, far from it. But rather for what it contains. A villain's tale. How often do you get to listen to a story where the villain is the protagonist? No, not an anti-hero, or a brooding monster, nor a hero thinly disguised as a villain. And not evil. If you want evil, take that nonsense to therapy.

Master of Formalities

Even when finding oneself engaged in interstellar war, good form must be observed. Our story is set thousands of years after the Terran Exodus, where two powerful, planet-dominating families - the elegant House Jakabitus and the less refined Hahn Empire - have reached a critical point in their generations-long war. Master Hennik, the Hahn ruler's only son, has been captured, and the disposition of his internment may represent a last and welcome chance for peace.

The Rules of Supervillainy: The Supervillainy Saga Volume 1

Gary Karkofsky is an ordinary guy with an ordinary life living in an extraordinary world. Supervillains, heroes, and monsters are a common part of the world he inhabits. Yet, after the death of his hometown's resident superhero, he gains the amazing gift of the late champion's magical cloak. Deciding he prefers to be rich rather than good, Gary embarks on a career as Merciless: The Supervillain Without Mercy. But is he evil enough to be a villain in America's most crime-ridden city?

Orconomics: A Satire: The Dark Profit Saga, Book 1

Professional heroes kill and loot deadly monsters every day, but Gorm Ingerson's latest quest will be anything but business as usual. The adventuring industry drives the economy of Arth, a world much like our own but with more magic and fewer vowels. Monsters' hoards are claimed, bought by corporate interests, and sold off to plunder funds long before the Heroes' Guild actually kills the beasts. Of course, that's a terrible arrangement for the Shadowkin; orcs, goblins, kobolds, and their ilk must apply for to become Noncombatant Paper Carriers to avoid being killed and looted by heroes.

Space Team: The Wrath of Vajazzle

Suicide Squad meets Galaxy Quest, in this fast-paced, laugh-out-loud novel from the author the Independent calls, "the new Terry Pratchett." After saving an alien race and its god from a sentient zombie virus, Cal Carver and the crew of the Dread Ship Shatner are feeling pretty pleased with themselves. Unfortunately, the creator of the zombie virus is out for revenge, and has recruited the galaxy's deadliest - and oldest - assassin, Lady Vajazzle, to hunt Space Team down.

The Fifth Ward: First Watch

A watchman of the Yenara City guard has gone missing. The culprit could be any of the usual suspects: drug-dealing orcs, mind-controlling elves, uncooperative mages, or humans being typical humans. It's up to two reluctant partners - Rem, a hungover miscreant who joins the Watch to pay off his bail, and Torval, a maul-wielding dwarf who's highly unimpressed with the untrained and weaponless Rem - to uncover the truth and catch the murderer loose in their fair city.

An Unattractive Vampire

After three centuries trapped underground, thousand-year-old Yulric Bile, also known as The Cursed One, The Devil's Apprentice, He Who Worships the Slumbering Horrors, awakens only to find that no one believes he is a vampire. Apparently he's just too ugly. Modern vampires, he soon discovers, are pretty, weak, and, most disturbing of all, good.

Publisher's Summary

Teri and Phil had never needed their own personal god. But when Phil is passed up for a promotion - again - it's time to take matters into their own hands. And look online.

Choosing a god isn't as simple as you would think. There are too many choices; and they often have very hefty prices for their eternal devotion: blood, money, sacrifices, and vows of chastity. But then they find Luka, raccoon god of prosperity. All he wants is a small cut of their good fortune. Oh - and to crash on their couch for a few days.

Divine Misfortune is a story of gods and mortals - in worship, in love, and at parties.

If you listen to the audio clip for Divine Misfortune, you will not only get a good sample of the nice narration work of Fred Berman, but you will be immediately clued in to the zany tone that carries through this whole book. A. Lee Martinez includes a whole pantheon of Norse, Greek, Roman, Egyptian, and more gods in this farce and the story is presented strictly for comedy; no deep thoughts or religious commentary here. It won't bring new insights, but it will probably make you laugh out loud. The tone of the book reminded me of the Iron Druid fantasy series with gods behaving in ways that would make atheism very attractive. Great listen for some good laughs.

A fun book. An interesting take on religion, benign, not heavy or preachy. Definitely funny, and strangely atheist friendly. There is some extrapolations on humanitarianism, but it stays in the shallow end. A novel approach to the relationships and mythos of deities and their followers.

Divine Misfortune is one of those books that's easy to relate with. A good pick me up listen after your car breaks down, or your boss yells at you. Lucky struck me as kind of douchey Raoul Duke (Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas,) but perhaps that was intentional.

I'm a big fan of this author and the bizarre tales he tells. It also reminds me of some of the Christopher Moore books in many ways. This one was good, but it took a few chapters to really capture my attention. Once it did it was a good listen. The characters, although truly bizarre began to develop nicely throughout the book and despite being pulled from religions throughout the centuries became very real to me. I would definitely give this book a listen.

This is an amusingly clever tale of online deity shopping gone wrong. In an attempt to improve their situation Phil and Teri sign up as the newest followers of Lucky, a minor god of fortune. Lucky fails to tell the young couple about his baggage, mainly a former girlfriend and goddess of misery who is stalking him and the god of wrath and destruction that is trying to poach and eat Lucky’s followers in a misguided game of one-upmanship. It’s original, funny and well written.

The worlds of A. Lee Martinez are filled with a delightful and sometimes nonsensical mystery, and show how thin the border can be between ourselves and everything we can't explain.

Divine Misfortune is a hilarious and oddly believable look at how the world could be if the Gods truly showed themselves, existed all at the same time and adapted themselves to our time.
It was a very enjoyable audiobook, and one I will find myself returning to, often.

The concept of the universe in this novel with gods living among mortals and it is a way of life. Didn't like gorgos defeating thor though! Lol!

What was one of the most memorable moments of Divine Misfortune?

LOL!! The god of the wind sucking gorgos into a bag and kicking and stomping him! The god of deaths displeasure and the god of the wind retorting "What?!? It gets the job done!" Then the god of death joining him . .. . awesome.

Have you listened to any of Fred Berman’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

Fred Berman is only matched by Chris Aiello! I now choose books not only by author but also by reader. these two are my favorites!

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

I laughed hysterically for about 20 minutes at 1:00 am (ish). My wife woke up and looked at me but I couldn't stop laughing so I went downstairs to finish laughing. I wish there was possibly a drawing of lucky.

I would recommend this book to friends who like a little absurdity, or friends who like trashy science fiction movies.

What did you like best about this story?

This story paced itself just right. It kicked in the absurd early on, and then built on it slowly using loads of humour, cliche and "I saw that coming but still got a surprise" type moments to get to a obvious but still surprising climax. <br/><br/>

Any additional comments?

I bought this book based on my previous purchased of his book "Automatic Detective". Initially I was a bit disappointed that this book had a less noir style, but soon I forgot about that and enjoyed this book for it's own merits. It's not good literature, but it's a good story and a fun listen.

If you like Neil Gaiman, Douglas Adams, Robert Asprin, Christopher Moore or Terry Pratchett, then this is a mug of ale or glass of wine from the same brewery my friend. Some good ol' light-hearted fun.

I thought the concept of the novel was fun, the narrator was animated, and even the characters you hated made you laugh.

While not quite in the realm of similar classics like "Good Omens" or "Long Dark Tea-time of the Soul", this book did a good job of resurrecting the age of polytheism for the modern commercial age, and along the way demonstrated how living forever can screw with someone's value of life.

I haven't had this much fun listening to fiction in a long time. As other reviewers have noted this will be most appealing to atheists and theists who are willing to entertain the idea that their religion may not be the only "truth". What I didn't see mentioned by others is the superb narration. Not only does each character have a distinct voice in many cases it's hard to imagine the character speaking any other way. I found this especially true for the main god, Lucky, as well most of the other characters (although this didn't extend to the main mortal protagonists Terry and Phil).