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Friday, 23 February 2018

Consider it official: Judith Collins just blew my mind!

Its almost a week old but upon seeing the headline that said Judith Collins considers herself the "fun" candidate I had to click on the link and see for myself.What I found was the usual low grade journalism from Newshub (hence why I don't usually use them for links in my posts) via Ryan Bridge whose style of "writing" seems to be simply to cut and paste verbatim whatever Collins said to him.But in his defense the snippets of Collins in the article and this other jewel from Newshub, simply titled "I stab from the front" - Judith Collins is such an astounding combination of truth, humor, delusion and just plain bizarre that if I did not know better I would have assumed it satire written by the likes of the Onion.For example check these out:

"With me there's a real sense of fun. It will be a hell of a ride and so much fun, and you'll enjoy every minute.

"My style of fun is slightly more gladiatorial."

"It's possibly a little late, but I suppose I could have a miracle, and the baby could be called Miracle Collins Wong Tung. It'd be great [When asked about having a baby to compete with Jacinda]

Or how about this very catty comment

"I think Jacinda Ardern is utterly playing to her strengths. The Vogue shoots and all that. It's good for New Zealand. Good on her. She could be a fashion model, frankly."

But wait there is more to come...

"I'd go after some of her vote. Not the soft fluffy vote, the red meat. The working people, working in the panel beaters, who don't read Vogue, who go to work, pay their taxes, grind out their life, trying to buy a house."

Meeeeoooowwww!

On one hand its clear that Collins has a sense of humor and I can definitely admire that and its also clear that she was having fun with her interviewers in the same way a cat plays with the mouse before eating it but if there is even a shred of serious in any of the things she is saying then you have got to wonder what she would be like as leader of the opposition or PM.

And there is just so much meat on the bones of those statements (and others in both articles) to leverage off that if one wished that you could write several posts about them without even trying.

But the one thing I whole-heartedly agree with Collins on, is this wisdom nugget:

"These are extraordinary times and we need to take quite different steps than what everybody's going to be comfortable with. We're never going to out-Jacinda Jacinda."

I suspect my idea of what "different steps" is varies from Judith's but that's probably a given.So, I'm not a fan of Judith Collins as politician but if she was to take her one woman comedy show on the road I would absolutely buy a ticket. Who she reminds me of at this point, for whatever reason, is the late Robert "Piggy" Muldoon with her combination of in your face attitude, naked lust for power and glib flippancy.

And if I pause for a minute and consider the rest of the field she is up against, with the likes of Steven Joyce, Simon Bridges, Amy Adams and Mark Mitchell, none of whom seem to have a sense of humor, maybe she is the fun* candidate after all.

Itsa me!

Political pyromaniac; born again democrat; satirical connotator; fascist anarchist; relaxed conservative; focused liberal; consumer of truth, witch-hunter general of lies and putter of the praxis into perfect!