Self-Healing

Someone told me years ago (long time student of ACIM) that one of the first concepts introduced is that the world is an illusion. She said it was really really hard to wrap your mind around, it would take years to understand, and maybe forget about it for awhile. So, of course, I dove right in.

Part of me was relieved that none of this was real, but there was a part of me that was definitely not understanding this:

“I am not a body, I am free, I am still as God created me.”

Because it led to all sorts of hell, for myself, and others I know. I now comprehend that it is an easy little chant, but I don’t know anyone who believes it. Intellectually maybe, but not really knowing it. My own personal forays into this arena were catastrophic.

While attending Retreats to further my knowledge and understanding, certain people would come up and tell me things like: I have a message for you from so and so (always deceased), and my Higher Self/Divine Self/Intuition somehow knew they were just not telling the truth. The first time this occurred, I just happened to have recently received my own message from this person that passed, so I knew it was bullshit. But, ‘ya know, you’re at a Retreat being all nice and loving, and I just didn’t have the guts to call them out even though they were highly insistent on DELIVERING THE TRUTH TO ME. It went on for days.

There was another time, at a different Retreat, when someone claimed they were channeling Jesus, and he was going around telling people that they were soul mates. Maybe he was getting divine communiques, but I’m pretty damn sure that Jesus was not advising him to dispense that crap to unsuspecting and quite vulnerable participants. Oh my, the things we do to ourselves.

This usually seems to happen during the breaks, never in the presence of a teacher or facilitator. I began to realize that people were at all different levels, as we are supposed to be, and that’s cool. What definitely is not cool is when their “spiritual superiority” kicks in, they succumb to their loftiness, and begin dispensing unsolicited advice. And there always seems to be some unkindness attached to their words.

I have a great buddy who went straight to death because of these well-meaning (?) meddlers. They had assured her that she could cure herself, according to them. She immediately went into fear and shame, as she had many medical issues and was now convinced that she just wasn’t good enough or smart enough or spiritual enough to heal herself. She arrived home and was hospitalized. She then collapsed into some kind of mental hysteria and was not making any damn sense. I talked to her, via phone, at the hospital. She was refusing to take the prednisone that would save her life. I asked her to please take the drugs, the nurses were her angels and that medication was her very own special form of self-healing right now. I could not get through to her, she kept refusing and even had madly convinced her family to join with her. She died the next morning, but fortunately one of those angels just happened to be with her, and poof, gave her the prednisone, which brought her back to life.

Here are her own words:

“I talked to you soon after I went into the hypoxia where my brain went haywire. I had too much oxygen with the drop in prednisone (I said 4 days only then refused more). My blood gasses were all whacked out and caused confusion and hallucinations, etc. One of the reasons I refused prednisone was because I didn’t want to gain weight (20 pounds is a lot on a small person) and get a round, moon face.”

I’ve always had the thought that I am a body, and that this body is part of my classroom. Through Leni’s guides, I now know that this is true. We chose this body and whatever else we need to experience, before we decided to come in. It is our lesson in contrasts and we must quit pretending that it doesn’t matter. It matters very much. Once I could see that, I could also see how much denial is going on around that very controversy and we are making ourselves crazy.

There is definitely is a time when you begin to self-heal, but so far, almost everyone is trying to do it with the intellectual mind, and it appears that the success rate is not so good. When it finally does kick in, you KNOW it wasn’t done by you. It is completed by the Higher Self or Divine Mind, and has nothing to do with you. It just happens.

My great buddy and I have looked at this for a couple of years. We could finally see where this discernment begins. Instead of focusing intellectually (and we all do this) on the healing, you begin to practice healing your mind. (Some impressive, and easily done exercises to work with this can be found at: www.egointegration.com) The baggage that began to emerge from her unconscious were self-worth and sense of being a victim. All learned, all easily undone, when working with the exercises I previously mentioned. Oddly enough, the more she worked with the exercises, the stronger she became. She was finally speaking her mind to all of us without worrying if we were going to like her or not. We have always just loved the shit out of her and did not care one way or the other if she wanted to people please. She decided to let go of her precious victim trophy (again learned) and guess what? People stopped showing up in her life to attack her. Her art, which has always been exceptional, is accelerating and her health (especially her breathing) is showing a marked improvement. And that is not something you expect as you age, but, yeah, another myth busted.

If you are ever at a Retreat, or some other such love gathering, and someone wants to bestow their gifts of lofty superiority on you, maybe start spinning around and screeching like a howler monkey. Or, perhaps it would be more fun to get on your hands and knees and begin flinging dirt and debris on them, much like a dog. My own personal fantasy is to throw rocks at them, but, uh, that’s just me.

And then, just maybe, with such unpredictable, humorous and outrageous behavior, we can begin to heal each other, and end such nonsense for those that follow. Our job is never to correct another. We must always remember to: Do no harm.

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