7 Steps To Stop Being A Pushover

Are you the passive type of man who, despite your best intentions, lets others walk all over you? If your friends and colleagues view you as the peacemaker, the one who won't rock the boat or the man who never says "no," maybe it's time to change.

Think about how you routinely react when you're cut in front of in a line, or if someone walks up behind you and orders a drink after you've been waiting patiently to get the bartender's attention. You might say such things don't bother you, but maybe that's just to save face. And these frustrations, no matter how petty they may seem, may be affecting your health more than you know.

Suppose that, every year, it falls on your shoulders to organize the playoff pool. On the surface, it's a small thing, but you may start to resent it if it makes you feel like you're allowing others to take advantage of you. And what about your career? Business leaders can empathize and seek collaboration and teamwork, but ultimately must take responsibility and make decisions for themselves. Stop wavering and take charge.

It's great to be perceived as a nice guy, but if achieving that image comes at the expense of your self-confidence, physical health, career goals, and the success of your interpersonal relationships, you need an injection of backbone. By our actions, we teach people how to treat us. You can adjust your behavior and change their attitudes toward you. Here are some tips to avoid being a pushover.

know your goals

Maybe you know that you don't like being pushed around, but have become so accustomed to it that you're not sure what you should be striving for. Developing a more assertive attitude should allow you to do the following: Take back control of your rights and stop being walked all over.

Regain respect and stop allowing people to take advantage of you.

Change people's perception of you from weak to assertive.

Increase your self-confidence and sense of pride.

assert yourself

Now you know your goals; it's time to set about accomplishing them. Seven simple steps can take you from being a guy who gets walked all over to one who stands his ground.

1- Express yourself

Listen to your instincts. When something bothers you or you feel you've been wronged, it's best to speak up right away. This might take some practice. If you miss your chance on the spot, plan your strategy to bring up the issue privately later.

Ask for a meeting with your colleague and explain how you feel about short deadlines with no advance notice. Tell your girlfriend you didn't like her regaling everyone at the dinner table with details about your sex life. You need to speak up. Discuss these issues calmly, without accusations, and you will reduce your own tension and gradually change how others perceive and treat you.

2- Stop being agreeable

No matter how hard you try, you can't please everyone all the time. When your thoughtfulness and reluctance to hurt other people's feelings start to impact your own well-being, it's time to start looking out for No. 1.

If your girlfriend picks fights over ridiculous issues and your response is to avoid confrontation by apologizing and saying she's right, maybe she's just as sick of your attitude as you should be. In fact, maybe she persists in her nitpicking because she's trying to force you to take a stand on something — anything! Stand up for yourself, express your opinions and say "no" once in a while. If the relationship is worth saving, she'll respect you much more for your confidence than for being a wimp.

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