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Double the Douche.

So this week has been a case of speaking to guys and then blocking, always a good week dating wise when this happens!

Let’s start with The Artist, I sort of sensed an immediate clash of personalities but you know me I cracked on! The major warning signs were the questions he was throwing out at me after a day of talking ‘do you fancy me?’ ‘Do you want to fuck me?’ And my personal favourite which is never good ‘how many other guys are you talking to?’ It comes across as soooo needy! Also this may sound wanky but I hate it when I have mundane generic questions thrown at me, I like silly fun conversations that go off on random tangents but here’s this guy asking if I ever had a pet? How does that really learn anything about me? The final straw was when I joked that if he drew me he would get into my pants, well this guy presented me with a doodle and actually thought this meant we would be fucking! Erm…it’s slightly harder than that mate! After he never got the answers that he wanted and I stopped replying he decided that and I quote ‘was a horrible person and he fell into my trap’ my what?! I mean I’ve had a lot of penis but there’s no chance of anyone falling into it! And then he did the classic recovery technique of saying he only messaged me because he was drunk….way to regain your dignity buddy!

Then there was the racing car driver. A hoot to text (take note doodler!) we were flirting and then he started getting really persistent about coming to my house that night bare in mind we had spoken for about three hours. Well I sacked it off and started speaking to someone else as it started to get annoying. Half an hour later I got an aggressive message asking me why I was still online? Oh god no. I literally can’t be dealing with this shit. If he’s being needy now what would he be like if we were actually going out? So I just straight up blocked him.

I guess the way I have to look at this now is that maybe it’s a good thing I’m meeting all these dickheads, because eventually they will run out and I will have blocked them all to make way for my prince! I’m being wildly optimistic aren’t I?!