Let's just get this out of the way first: Michael Bublé did NOT make this week's Top 5 list, okay? He didn't even come close. If this were a rundown of, say, the Top 5 Guys Frank Sinatra's Ghost Should Terrorize for Biting His Shtick or Top 5 Reasons Not to Marry Someone (No. 2: "He likes Michael Bublé" No. 1: "He is Michael Bublé"), the Canadian would have made it. But alas, today's checklist is dedicated to the Top 5 March concerts, and Bublé's March 13 tilt at the St. Pete Times Forum just didn't make the cut. Capiche?

Related News/Archive

•1TAYLOR SWIFT (St. Pete Times Forum, Thursday): Tay-Tay's Tampa gig is the kickoff of her U.S. tour. This show sold out in minutes flat. But if you're dying for tickets, maybe, just maybe, you can bamboozle an 8-year-old fan out of her seats. Try this. Tell her you're "Jonathan Swift, Taylor's writerly uncle. If you give me your tickets, honey, I'll introduce you to Taylor." If the 8-year-old catches you in the scam, run like hell 'cause those girls can fly … or so I heard. (sptimes forum.com)

•2GORDON LIGHTFOOT (Mahaffey Theater, March 12): Great chunks of my Garanimaled youth were spent in the backseat of my parents' 10-ton Oldsmobuick listening to fuzzy '70s soft-pop crackling out of a tinny stereo. It sounded lousy at the time, but man, it sure sounds sweet now. That yesteryear playlist included Gordon Lightfoot's 1974 classic Sundown. All together now: "I can see her lyin' back in her satin dress / In a room where you do what you don't confess …" (mahaffeytheater.com)

•3MARVIN HAMLISCH & THE FLORIDA ORCHESTRA (Mahaffey Theater, March 13 and Ruth Eckerd Hall, March 14):I just bought the vinyl soundtrack of 1973 classic The Sting. The cover art of Newman and Redford hatching a plan is the epitome of illustrated cool. Even better is gawking at said sharps while listening to the jaunty rag of Scott Joplin's The Entertainer as masterfully interpreted by Marvin Hamlisch. If Marv doesn't play this, you have my permission to riot. (mahaffeytheater.com; rutheckerdhall.com)

•4WILCO (Ruth Eckerd Hall, March 23): Tickets for this are going to be a tough get. But if you're dying to get in, maybe, just maybe, you can bamboozle a 43-year-old music snob out of his seats. Try this. Tell him you're "Jay Farrar, an old friend of Jeff Tweedy's. If you give me your tickets, hipster, I'll introduce you to Jeff." If he catches you in the scam, run like hell 'cause those guys … actually, just take your time. Wilco fans eat a lot of cheese. (rutheckerdhall.com)

•5ALICIA KEYS (St. Pete Times Forum, March 28):On two occasions as a working journalist — at the Grammys, at the MTV VMAs — I've had the legal right to stand a few feet from Alicia Keys. Let me tell you: She is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. And I feel confident in saying that because my fiancee never has time to read the Monday paper.By the way,I also shrunk my fiancee's sweater in the wash and hid it in the hamper.Wow,this feels so liberating!(sptimesforum.com)

Sean Daly can be reached at sdaly@sptimes.com or (727) 893-8467. His Pop Life blog is at blogs.tampabay.com/popmusic.