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We open on a row of trucks leaving a warehouse and clearing security on their way out. One of the truck drivers is particularly nervous, causing the security guard to inquire what’s going on. But before you can say “Oh, this guy’s going to die” out loud, surprise! A guy pops up in the passenger seat, shoots the security guard and the driver, then slides into the driver’s seat. A second guy pops up - how many people does the cab of this truck fit? - and freaks out, complaining that Guy #1 didn’t have to shoot them.

But before the shooter can express any remorse, oops! He gets shot, too. Turns out the security guard stayed alive just long enough to take the guy out. Guy #2 who had been complaining about all the violence thinks now would be a good time to get the heck outta here, so then he slides behind the wheel and pulls away.

Lots of shooting before the opening credits even hit. Whoa, buddy. Buckle in for this episode, as that’s going to be a bit of a theme…

Callen is bringing coffee to Sam as they work on his boat. Well, Sam is working on his boat, Callen is mostly just trash talking the whole process. He then suggests getting jet skis, which sounds like the plot of a future episode I would really enjoy watching, but Sam doesn’t go for that plan. The partners’ bickering is interrupted by Eric calling them in to discuss the shooting at the warehouse.

It turns out the cargo in the truck that Guy #2 - aka Tony Young - drove away with was a shipment of M27s, with a total street value of well over one million dollars. I just Googled what an M27 rifle looks like, which took me down a Wikipedia hole of weapons, and now I’m fairly certain I’m on an FBI database somewhere.

Anyway, Callen and Sam decide that, based on how sloppy this whole thing went down, this Tony Young guy is an amateur. (One might say he’s…. young. *lowers sunglasses over eyes*) Eric is able to track the truck a little bit and before he loses it, he sees it meet up with an SUV, who has a driver Sam recognizes.

It looks like Sam’s friend who works in private security, Byron Brown, is somehow tied up in all of this. But Sam isn’t buying it - Brown is a stand-up guy and would never do anything this shady. Nell gently presents evidence that disagrees - he resigned from his job a week ago, and OH YEAH THERE HE IS ON TAPE MEETING WITH THE DRIVER OF A TRUCK FULL OF STOLEN GUNS. Callen suggests Brown jumped to the dark side, but Sam still isn’t going for it.

Meanwhile, Kensi and Deeks are on their way to Tony Young’s last known address in an absolutely beautiful Porsche. Apparently he just happened upon this car in the motor pool and decided to give it a spin.

The couple banter about how Mosley probably won’t let him keep the car, since she may not even let him keep his job, and dang but that car is beautiful.

What’s not beautiful is the Winnebago they pull up to that has seen waaaaaay better days. And I’m going to be honest, I didn’t know Winnebago was a brand name until just now. I thought it just described that particular style of van/camper. Anyway, they draw their guns and approach, but there’s no reason for the precautions since Young isn’t there.

But a girl who could be Kirsten Dunst’s cousin is, and she is pretty drunk, and she’s not even blinking an eye at law enforcement with guns drawn knocking on her door. She is so over the whole thing, and NO SHE’S NOT KIRSTEN DUNST'S COUSIN, SHE’S THAT GIRL FROM MISS CONGENIALITY. Oh my gosh, she’s totally the girl from Miss Congeniality - Miss Rhode Island, Chery Frasier, the girl who thinks April 25 is the perfect date because all you need is a light sweater. (A quick IMDb search tells me that is a completely different actress, but y’all back me up on this.)

Anyway. Miss Rhode Island’s twin turns down Kensi’s card and Deeks does a quick sweep of the camper before leaving with Kensi. And what did he see in the Winnebago? “Men’s shoes, second glass of wine, Need for Speed, pause in the TV.” They make a bet that Young’s about to come back and they put their aviators down for a stakeout in the world’s most conspicuous car.

Elsewhere, driving a normal car, Sam and Callen have found Brown. Callen seems pretty convinced the guy’s gone evil and say’s he’s “wondering if we ever really know anyone.” Sam remains steadfast on his friend’s innocence, but that starts to waiver when they see him walk out of a building with Travis Coogan, a known player in a major terrorist organization.

Callen ducks into a bus stop to avoid being seen, and we catch a glimpse of the L.A. Metro map on the wall. Quick question for L.A. readers - does anyone ride public transit there? Because that map looks similar to the Atlanta transit system in that it covers approximately 10% of where it’s most needed.

Back at the fancy car stakeout, Deeks and Kensi are looking good and having a conversation about looking good, and I’m fairly certain Deeks is just snapping a bunch of selfies. His impromptu photoshoot is cut short when Miss Rhode Island jumps in a car - wait, didn’t we just establish that this chick is drunk? - and drives off. They follow her, presumably to find Young and not to give her a DUI.

Back at the office, Eric has found that Brown and Coogan are at a charity sports shooting event in Malibu, CA hosted by defense contractors Livingston-Bradford. Apparently 90% of this company’s business is supplying legal arms to friendly governments, 10% is philanthropy. But there’s this dirty rumor that they’re supplying weapons to both sides of the Western Sahara conflict. So, it's basically Iron Man's origin story. Callen and Sam think the event is where Brown and Coogan will find buyers for those M27s, and start pitching suggestions of how they can go into the party.

They throw out some fun ideas - going in as a senator, investor, foreign royalty, etc - but Mosley walks up and brings the whole thing to a screeching halt. She has an invite to the event since she’s EAD, and they’re going as her security team.

Sam is impressed. “Like a page out of Hetty’s book,” he comments. “Not even from the same library,” Callen responds. I side with Callen. If it were Hetty she would’ve spoken in a backwards riddle, all Yoda-like.

Speaking of Hetty, Eric would like to have a chat about his research on her whereabouts. He tells Sam and Callen he found her boat in Hawaii, where it’s been for weeks. But still no sign of her. The team has a quick chat - maybe she really is gone for good, and they just need to accept it.

But let’s not think about that for too long because it’s time to get ~fancy~ and go to a party. Sam and Callen are lookin’ sharp in their suits and Mosley is wearing a beautiful black dress with white ruffles and WHOA. Um… Let’s just say that she incorporates her undergarments into her outfit in a way that would be sexy at a party, but it’s an interesting clothing choice for a government employee to make for an event she’s attending with two people she is the direct boss of. (And I know this picture does NOT show what I'm talking about, but whatever.) I like the outfit, and she looks beautiful, it’s just the opposite of everything we know about her character thus far. I would’ve pictured Mosley’s interpretation of “formal” as all black, buttoned up head to toe, hair in a bun.

But clearly she’s working an angle - or she’s just finally starting to be comfortable with her team and revealing more of her personality (and bra) - because she’s really flaunting the “perks that come with being the EAD” status. She makes a point to show off her personal guns that she had sent down to the event.

The trio mingle with the event attendees, which include Mr. Livingston and Mr. Bradford, of Livingston-Bradford fame. Bradford is pretty excited about the company’s impending shift away from guns to focusing on philanthropy, calling the event a “going away party for guns.”

During all these conversations, Sam and Callen are just chilling in the background, acting as Mosley’s security guards. Well, Callen is. Sam is terrible at this inconspicuous thing - leaning in to listen to every conversation, making eye contact with everyone he’s listening to… Well, he’s about as subtle as a dude that jacked can be, I guess.

But then he delivers my favorite line so far this year, commenting on the rich folks at the event: "Most of these guys were born on third base and they act like they hit a triple.” I’m a huge baseball fan (confession time: the World Series is a big reason this review is so late,) so this really hit me.

Eric runs facial recognition on the crowd as Sam sees his buddy Byron and runs up to say hey. They both make pleasant small talk and are all smiles, but Sam knows something is up.

Back in the Porsche, Deeks and Kensi have followed Miss Rhode Island to Tony Young. Kensi jumps out of the car to confront him, and Deeks hilariously yells after her, “Go get ‘em tiger, I’ll stay here and look awesome.” Truer words have never been spoken. They get Tony while his girlfriend - is anyone worried about her still being drunk? - drives off.

Kensi asks Young where the rifles are and he says he was just doing what he was told, following Byron Brown’s instructions. He tells them where the guns are and that an exchange is supposed to go down soon.

Back at the gun show - and I’m not just talking about the agents (sorry, I’m in a really dad joke mood) - it’s time for Mosley to show off her fancy personal guns. And show off she does, hitting the targets while firing with both hands. And by the way, it turns out Hidoko is working the event undercover, and I can’t be the only one who has picked up on the chemistry between her and Mosley, right?

Sam and Callen talk smack about her behind her back and it’s clear they still really don’t love Mosley. Callen sounds like he wants to give her a chance, but Sam is still super opposed. I kind of agree with Sam on this - it’s hard to nail down Mosley since she plays everything so close to the vest.

Over at the warehouse exchange, Young is pacing and losing it. A guy named Felix Swoop swoops in (not even sorry) to buy the guns. As soon as he gives Young the money, Deeks and Kensi arrest him. He claims no connection to Brown and Coogan.

The partners at the warehouse call up the partners at the gun event and try to figure out what’s going on. Brown and Coogan are still at the event, having made no move to attend the buy at the warehouse, and somehow Sam and Callen figure out that means they’re planning an assassination.

I’m going to be honest - I have absolutely no idea how they came to that conclusion. It’s the right conclusion, but I really had a very difficult time following their logic and I re-watched the scene three times. It has something to do with the fact that Brown kept the truck the guns were in, but that’s all I got. Anyone have any explanations they can throw my way?

Anyway, so now it’s time to figure out who the target of the assassination is. Sam runs off to talk to Brown and tasks Callen with finding the truck

Sam finds Brown pretty immediately and the two fight, with Brown insisting that he doesn’t have a choice. The room where they fight is filled with boxes - are there guns in there? Or is it just convenient to have a bunch of empty boxes they can fall into during the fight? Either way, Sam gets knocked out and Brown runs off.

Meanwhile, Callen has found the truck - now empty - and a bunch of dead security guards whose uniforms have been stolen. As he’s putting together what happened, someone runs around and shoots at Callen. He shoots back and runs off to meet a very quickly recovered Sam, who has decided someone must be threatening Brown to make him do all this.

They call up Eric to have him find Brown’s family and see what’s up. Eric sends Kensi and Deeks off to his house and sure enough, they find his wife and kids surrounded my men with rifles in their own home. The mom seems VERY chill about the whole thing and very confident he’s not going to hurt them. The agents rescue the family and gets the message back to Sam.

Eric has been digging a little more into Livingston-Bradford and found that they actually are supplying guns to both sides of the war. They deduce that Bradford wants to pull company out of the weapons business, but Livingston may not be as into that plan. Thus, Bradford is the assassination target.

Then I am COMPLETELY taken out of the episode by the most POORLY WRITTEN COMMERCIAL I’VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. It’s a dog food commercial that opens with the winning line: “He’s a dog in every sense, but in his heart, he’s a wolf.” What. What? Just, what. That’s so, so, so stupid.

Anyway, once I’m done writing my complaint letter to the dog food company, I’m back to the show. Sam spies an open window where Brown is setting up a rifle, but Sam easily stops him by showing him a picture of his family, safe and sound. Um, that could’ve been easily faked, but sure. But Brown says that he was just a back up shooter.

Callen tackles Bradford before he can think about taking the stage, saving him from sniper #1. Sam quickly takes the sniper out, saving the day. Sam, Callen, and Mosley confront Livingston, who swears he had nothing to do with the plot… But surprise! His wife did! She’s clearly grown accustomed to a certain way of living and wanted to keep the money-making part of the business going.

The case all wrapped up, Mosley encourages Sam and Callen to have a drink at the SoHo House, on her. Yet another privilege of being the EAD, apparently. She’s really enjoying flaunting her power this episode, huh?

Back at the office, Deeks is editing his selfies and talking about how he can’t wait to drive around the motor pool Porsche some more, but Mosley shows up to break the bad news… It’s actually her personal car. DANG how much does EAD pay? I think the point of this episode was to show off how much money Mosley has.

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