Phoned Out

Those who have been around me for any length of time will be aware of my effect on technology. Put simply those things that I do not blow up can often ‘malfunction’ in my tender care. If this were a measurable phenomenon I might make be able to harness it in some way – but far from being an asset in any fashion my super-power is annoyingly random.

By far the worst victims of this ‘gift, are anything that relies on batteries. Just last week I was looking for a watch to wear and found no less than eight that I had ‘killed’ at various times. I have likewise killed off TV remotes, laptops and yes… mobile phones.

Not wearing a watch is something I can work around most of the time, but not being able to have a mobile phone in my pocket, in a world that increasingly relies on them to function is just plain frustrating.

If I keep the phone about my person the battery will last perhaps a few hours – steadily losing the ability to take a charge until eventually dying altogether. If I keep the phone in my bag I don‘t hear it ring – leave it out anywhere just results in it going missing with monotonous frequency. You can see my problem. Bad enough without allowing for the ‘Law of Sod’ to take a hand.

I don’t do it often, but today, having missed a call the previous morning, I took my phone up to my office and put it on my desk. An hour later I went downstairs to fetch something – leaving the mobile behind – and yes, you guessed it, the damned thing rang.

Now we have irritating problem number two, my phone only rings 6 times before it cuts over to voice mail. It’s a setting that can be cut to less but not extended. Meaning that by the time I realised it was ringing and got upstairs – a hand’s breadth away from the desk… it stopped!

Unknown caller, so undoubtedly some cold caller, but grrrr – that is all I can say: grrrrrr!