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It feels as though the end of the year is always an appropriate time for reflection. This December 31st is no different. 2013 has been one hell of a year.

Last year, I blogged about whether or not New Year’s resolutions are worthwhile, or simply a waste of time. While I still hold onto the belief that it is always acceptable and encouraged to take a retrospective approach to an upcoming year, the ideology that a new year brings new opportunities and fresh beginnings is often a little bit idealistic (I’m not jaded).

Why must we wait for a new year to make a change in our lives? I am going to take the opportunity this New Year’s Eve to reflect on my past year’s triumphs and challenges, rather than set myself up for failure with resolutions that I may or may not commit to. I think that resolutions encourage positive change and am not discouraging any of you from making a resolution or two for yourself. I just want to make changes in my life as I am mentally and physically capable of doing so, on a day to day basis, rather than mapping out my entire year before it has even begun.

I do think that it is important to look back on the year, however. I learned a lot about myself this year. I shall share, without going into too many personal details:

I am more capable of overcoming obstacles than ever before

Family is everything

Friends are family that you choose to have in your life

I strive to be the wife that my husband deserves

Teaching is truly a vocation in my life (far beyond a career choice)

Kids really do say the darndest things; especially my grade 7s

Photography is a passion that I definitely want to pursue further

Procrastination is my biggest enemy

Turning 25 makes me feel like a real grown up

I have a backbone and deserve to stand up for myself

I wish all of my readers and friends a safe and prosperous New Year. I hope that you spend the evening with loved ones and I look forward to sharing more posts with all of you, here on Merzybean, in 2014.

I have an exciting interview for you today, as I spoke with Dominica Valentina who created the inspirational business and website for girls all around the world. I stumbled upon Dominica’s website via a YouTube video and once I finished perusing the website and blog, I was on board with the Smart Girl World Movement. I think that it is incredibly important for girls to bond together, rather than bringing each other down. As a girl who has been through many highs and lows in my own life, I value what Dominica is doing and think that it is valuable for girls to have a community in which they can unite and celebrate each other’s differences and similarities. Without further ado, let’s see what Dominica had to say about the Smart Girl World.

MB: How and when did the Smart Girl World develop?

DV: I was 15 years old when my mom told me I could be or do anything I wanted in life as long as I believed in myself. She gave me a ring and told me it was my “Smart Girl” ring. She wasn’t telling me what to do, she was trusting that I would always make the best decisions for myself in life and follow my dreams. It wasn’t until I was 19 when I decided to take this idea and expand it into a business for other girls to share and be apart of.

MB: How has your mother positively influenced you to be a smart girl yourself?

DV: My mom is the one person I can go to and talk about anything with. She listens to me when I have boy drama and is always there to give me the confidence boost when I need it. I think the most important way she influences me to be a Smart Girl is by teaching me to always follow my heart. We go through so much in life as girls, we make mistakes and none of us are perfect, but when we choose to think for ourselves, and always learn lessons in life, we grow and become stronger. My mother’s main goal for me in life is to teach me to have confidence in myself, believe in myself and love myself. When you do that, you will create whatever your heart desires in life.

MB: What do you hope to achieve with the Smart Girl movement?

DV: My main goal with the Smart Girl Movement is to show other girls that none of us are perfect. If one girl has been through something, there has to be thousands of other girls who feel the same way. I wish to bring girls together to support each other and encourage each other to achieve any desire they want in life. It’s cool to see other girls comment and really give another girl helpful encouragement and support!

MB: What have you learned about yourself as well as other girls since starting Smart Girl World?

DV: Each blog post I do is about something I am going through in life, or about something my girl friends are going through. It’s crazy because once I post something about how I’m feeling, I get so many girls emailing me saying they feel the same way! Or girls thank me for kind of opening up their minds about certain situations I blog about. When I first started this I didn’t think that many girls were going to relate to me, It turns out we all kind of feel the same way! I have definitely learned that by being real, people will relate to each other, and I think I have taught other girls to “not judge a book by its cover.”

MB: A large part of the Smart Girl World is setting and dreaming up goals. How do you achieve your goals?

DV: I love writing down my goals and putting them up all over my room and bathroom where I can see them everyday! I feel I have accomplished something when I can cross it off of my list! Sometimes I set goals that are too big for myself and get discouraged when I don’t achieve them quickly, so I’ve learned to set little goals for myself that eventually get me to the goal I desire 🙂

MB: What advice do you have for young girls struggling through personal issues?

DV: Just know that you are not alone, you could look at the most beautiful girl in the world and if you ask her if there is something about herself that she doesn’t like, I guarantee you she will tell you a list of things she wishes were different about herself. My main goal with helping girls struggling through personal issues is to love yourself. Constantly tell yourself that you are pretty and perfect just the way you are. Once you love yourself it will show and you will radiate confidence! It’s a struggle and it’s easier said than done, but that is my main goal with helping girls get through personal issues.

My proverbial hat goes off to Dominica, keep the Smart Girl World spinning and continue to inspire young girls. You can connect with Dominica and the Smart Girl World on Twitter, Facebook, and of course the Smart Girl World Website itself!

The power that girls have when coming together is so much stronger than when girls turn on one another. The perfect thing about girls is that we are not perfect, and the Smart Girl World is a refreshing reminder of this.

It appears as though we are living during a time where everyone is striving for the same thing: happiness. This is likely a common goal for everyone, despite generational and cultural differences. While we are collectively and individually aiming for happiness, this begs the question of who are we actually pleasing along the way? I started wondering about this after thinking about several conversations I have had with people in my life over the years. Some might say that I am a bit of a people pleaser. While this might seem like a good thing to the people who I am pleasing, this does not always benefit my own individual needs and wants. Quite frankly, this is what inspired this particular post.

People can be considered doormats if they are too willing to please others, but on the contrary can be considered selfish if they do something for themselves. As a society, where do we differentiate between the two? It appears as though the boundaries between being selfish and being selfless are blurred and this can either create a safe haven, or a bit of turmoil in one’s life. The goal is to find a happy balance between the two, pun intended, in order to avoid becoming stressed out.

It is really important to take care of ourselves, first and foremost. This is not meant to sound selfish, it is instead supposed to champion the importance of personal well-being. If we are not happy and satisfied with ourselves, it is not possible to be able to contribute to the happiness of those around us without a struggle. Particularly for us 20-somethings, I think that many of us are at vulnerable points of our lives and we are constantly striving to please others. We’re either trying to make someone else happy so that we can have a partner to share life and love with, or we are striving to please employers because we are on the never ending job hunt in today’s job market! No one wants to hear the sob story that times are hard, so what are we going to do about it? We can aim to achieve personal happiness in all aspects of our lives. It is important not to neglect our personal, physical, and mental well-being, so that when it comes time to please and impress others, we are fully able to do so without depleting from our own happiness.

Some things that I do to feel better and work on my well-being include reading a good book, listening to music, and going to the gym. While these things are smaller scale contributors to my personal well-being, every little bit helps! We must remember to take time to breathe and not allow the stresses around us to infiltrate our personal happiness.