The Journey of a Painter

NEAR GATLINBURG, Tenn. – It’s a summer day in June, and as my husband and I approach the Great Smoky Mountains National Park visitor center, I have one goal in mind: I want to see something extraordinary. At my request, the ranger at the visitor center pulls out a map, smiles and immediately points to the tallest waterfall in the area: Ramsey Cascades.

Getting there will require hiking a rugged 8-mile trail that gains 2,200 feet in elevation. Our reward: a 100-foot waterfall – something you won’t find in Illinois.It is 8 a.m. The sun is shining. We drive over rough terrain to the trailhead. Our backpack is loaded with snacks and water, and we are ready for the rigorous hike, with 4 rugged miles to reach the base of the waterfall.

A short distance into the hike, I hear the faint sound of moving water. This becomes the music of the forest. I slowly walk up the rocky path, focusing on the details. I notice the shapes of the flat rocks scattered along the trail, the muddy tree roots barely peeking out of the narrow dirt path and the bright green plants that line the trail. I see colors lurking in the shadows, the bright green moss on an old worn log, the footprints of travelers ahead of me and wildflowers leaning toward the sun. My eyes take in the details, my ears record the sound. My soul is at peace.

The trail becomes more challenging with every step. About two miles up the path, a single log footbridge sits 10 feet above the river. We cross it, and the narrow path becomes more steep and rugged, with rocks and tree roots protruding from the ground. I tell myself to focus on the ultimate reward. Every step, I know I am getting closer. Every step, the noise increases steadily.

Now, the moment has arrived. My heart is pounding from the effort of climbing over several steep rock and boulders. I have goosebumps! I climb the large boulder, look up and gasp.

Here it is: 100 feet of water falling down the spectacular rocky mountain. Time stands still. I want to trap this moment. I want to somehow capture the beauty that cannot be contained in a photograph. I want to take in all the details – the sounds, the power, the excitement, the beauty – and share them with others.

For the first time, I realize this is not just a hike to a waterfall; it is the start of my journey in art.

Editor’s notes:Lori Fuller, an academic records coordinator in the Office of the Registrar, is an accomplished artist. Her paintings will be showcased in the Illini Union Art Gallery, April 18 – May 31, 2018. Her work also is on display on her website.

I love art! I love the emotions involved with creating. I love the entire process from the experience of hiking outdoors- to the excitement of starting a new piece- and to a finished product. Art makes me happy. I also love exhibiting my work. I want viewers to have a connection to nature. I want the viewer to find the beauty that surrounds us and hopefully feel that peace associated with it. I remember my first show. I was walking at the Illini Union on campus and I saw a flyer about exhibiting artwork. I was torn; exhibiting art was intimidating. I would be displaying my art for the community to see. I had been thinking about showing my work but what if the audience didn't like my style? What if they hated it and the staff on campus regretted the whole thing! I was afraid to show people that side of me. I was afraid the entire process would create self doubt and the happiness I find in the process of artmaking would disappear. I would have nothing...

The deadline to submit my proposal was a few days away. I simply couldn't decide; I couldn't sleep. My art is an important part of my life; what seemed as a simple decision was not. The morning of the deadline, I decided to LEAP; knowing that my parachute may not open or I may have a rough landing. I invited my co-workers and many people I knew on campus to the opening reception. I have to admit I was nervous, scared, and excited all at the same time.

I had a good crowd at the reception. I really enjoyed the part where people would tell me about their favorite piece. I was surprised to hear their stories- a lady at the reception recognized the location of one of my paintings and told me of how her grandfather took her to that state park and shared his childhood stories with her. Another guest at the reception reminisced about his childhood and told me he too had a love of nature and art. A student stopped by the reception and shared her viewing experience. She told me that was just what she needed to get through finals week.

The exhibit had mixed reviews; some viewers commented on how the artwork reminded them of a special memory. Some viewers liked my earlier work with bolder colors and loose brushstrokes. Some viewers commented that it wasn't art. It is all fine- I am SO glad I took the leap. I learned so much about art, the process, and myself from that experience. Don't be afraid to leap!

We were planning to take a vacation this summer to see some waterfalls. We have been to North Carolina and Tennessee and New York. This time, we decided to seek a new adventure and head to Arkansas. I had a co-worker comment on the trails and forests and I decided to give it a try. I did my research: we LOVE scenic waterfalls and we absolutely LOVE rugged hikes. I found the perfect trail online: The Richland Creek Recreational Area. The hike was described as a difficult, barely marked trail and over a 7 mile hike in which you cross the creek several times. There were 3 waterfalls along this trail. WOW- Whats not to love about this trail????

Getting to the trail head proved to be difficult on its own. We finally find it (15 miles of gravel road with huge potholes) and started our adventure. We were both looking forward to this - the chance to add 3 more waterfalls to our list (this would make 40!) . We started at the trail head And lost the trail after 20 feet. We stayed close by the creek; sometimes walking along the edge, sometimes crossing along the slippery rocks, and sometimes battling the HOT sun, cobwebs and spiders on higher ground. Two hours later, we were still wandering along the creek hoping the first of the three waterfalls was right around the corner. Jim brought up a good point and one I usually forget to think about: we still have the hike back....

Sad to day, we did not make it to the first waterfall. The hike was a lot of fun, especially climbing over the rocks and through the creek. Walking along the barely marked trail proved to be more like bushwhacking and more strenuous than I could imagine. Nonetheless, the trail was gorgeous and I am inspired to create some artwork.

We decided to take a different way out of the Ozark Forest and we actually did see 2 waterfalls. I had a lot of fun hiking along the creek. It was a great workout and I am sure I will feel it in the morning.

I absolutely love the outdoors and one of my favorite activities is hiking. I enjoy walking along a trail next to a creek or hiking to a waterfall. When I travel, I take my handmade journal with me. Because the journal is created with a variety of papers, the journal is suitable for collage, watercolor, color pencils, charcoal, and mixed media. I often use my pocket size journal to capture a composition in nature or mimic the colors and textures I observe along the hike. Once I return from the hike, I apply what I observed along my journey and use it to refine my landscape drawings at home.

​I remember when the economy dropped and I was looking for a job. I applied and applied; at the time, I wasn’t picky. I had a master’s degree in education and it would have been nice to find work in the field of education, but I couldn’t afford to be choosy. My priority was to put food on the table and pay the bills. I applied EVERYWHERE. I applied for education jobs, I applied for hotel jobs, cleaning jobs, day care and doing taxes. I applied at a local bakery. Every week, I made it a goal to apply to 5-7 jobs and every week, I received on average 2 rejection letters. This continued for 2 years. When I eventually found work at a local bakery part-time, I never stopped applying and reaching for something better.

I kept all of the rejection letters. All of them. They made me angry; I was hurt and sad. That anger stayed with me for a long time. I just couldn’t understand why. Why didn’t they want to hire me? Why didn’t I even get called for an interview? My resume was beautiful and my cover letter was perfect. If they would just call some of my past employers, they would know I was a hard worker, never late, and very dependable. The truth is: I hardly ever got called for an interview. And any interview I did get, I could tell they already had someone in mind. I was a number; a required number for the interview list. Why me? What did I do wrong? I scream and scream. ARGGGGGGGGHHHH!!!

Rejection still hurts. I create art as a hobby. My goal is to eventually become a full time artist and that takes time. Everyone knows that you have to get noticed; get your name out there. So, I constantly apply to exhibit my work locally and throughout the state. I have had some solo shows and several several SEVERAL rejections.

Rejection stinks. When I get the fancy letter about “we had so many talented artists submit a proposal and we could only accept so many”…blah blah blah. “Please apply again or get on our mailing list”..blah blah blah or “Thank you again for inspiring us with your artwork” blah blah blah…All I heard was REJECTION. That word is right up there with loser, fail and not good enough. I have to be honest, I cringe. I hold my breath; I get red in the face, and shake a fist. Why me? Or better yet, why not me? I didn’t even make it to the top 25% percent? Are you blind???? Pathetic… come on!!! I APPLIED 5 TIMES! What do you want from me????

Back to reality-Rejection is normal. We just don’t hear about it or even see it. How many artist websites list all the places they have been rejected? It’s misleading. The rejection list would probably shock you and may even make you feel better yourself. You simply are not going to find a rejection list, no one wants to embrace their loss.

​Here is what I have learned:

DO NOT get in the habit of checking to see who won. It will make you crazy and you will start re-thinking your own art or develop negative opinions about art in general (the “a 2 year old could have done that…” thinking). An artist should never bend their style to please others. If you surrender to that, it no longer becomes art. All of this negativity becomes a straw and literally sucks all of the pleasure creating art gives to your soul.

INSTEAD- do your research. Apply to places that are a good fit or close to a good fit. Spend some time on your proposal and know your audience. I learned this very quickly. One of my first heartbreaking rejections was an art gallery near my work. The location was perfect and I knew that it would get a lot of traffic. I emailed the art director and even scheduled a time to meet. The location was even better than I imagined. Hundreds of faculty, staff, and students walked past this building every day. I was so excited, it was my opportunity to get my name out there. I WILL BE FAMOUS!!! The meeting went so well and I just knew this was MY open door. I submitted the proposal and it was rejected. It didn’t meet the social justice/environmental goals. I was devastated. I was angry. I quit making art. I didn’t take the time to see WHO I was submitting the proposal to. I set myself up for rejection.

DO NOT focus on the rejection; INSTEAD come to terms that it is a part of life. It simply doesn’t sound feasible to think you are always going to get what you want. Look at this as if it were a job. How can this exhibit benefit you? What are your goals? This is the nuts and bolts of success. Is your goal for people to see your work, to feel something and gain insight into something new? Is the sole purpose to sell? Rejection has forced me to look at other venues to exhibit my work: Coffee shops, law offices, retirement communities, home shows, magazines, social media. Do not put all your eggs in one basket. Do NOT rely on getting accepted for juried shows for your open door. If you continue to apply in addition to seeking other venues to display your work, then any acceptance will come as wonderful extraordinary news worthy of being added to your website.

DO NOT take it personal (easier said than done, right??). This piece of advice is constant struggle for me to grasp. Ever since I can remember, I have a habit of holding in hurt and I take it personally. At one time I kept all of the rejection letters I received through the mail when I desperately needed income. I went back to them every time I was feeling down; it was a physical reminder that I failed. You could imagine the relief I felt when I put them in the bonfire. Looking back now, I realize, it was for the best. I proved to myself I never gave up and it opened my eyes to a bigger world. INSTEAD,make rejection a learning experience not only for your career but a learning experience about yourself.

Bottom line is this: a loss is a loss. A rejection is a rejection. It is what it is. We must look at this through a positive lens; Every time I was being rejected from something good, I was actually being re-directed to something better. It is true. Rejection is the fuel that some of us need to be successful. We simply cannot let a harsh part of reality get in the way of something that makes our heart and soul happy. It forces us to be stronger and in some ways, it makes our art even better.

I have painted landscapes with acrylic for a few years and recently became interested in colored pencil. My early memories of colored pencil came in the form of a school supply. I remember sitting in elementary school outlining shapes in my coloring book and coloring with one colored pencil at a time. I honestly don’t remember learning about colored pencil in my art classes in high school. We spent our art period learning about paper making, oil painting, charcoal and pastels. In my college art history class, I cannot even recall seeing an artist who historically utilized colored pencils. So in my mind, I never thought of colored pencil as a medium for art making.

Thanks to social media, I fell in love with colored pencil, I quickly joined Facebook art groups and became familiar with many artists and styles. I was amazed at how artists were able to build up rich colors, textures, and details. I was amazed at how colored pencils can mimic paint. I felt it would be perfect for my landscapes- waterfalls, canyons, and creeks. I was determined to learn and so I did. I taught myself.

I starting researching the internet. I carefully looked at images, paying attention to all of the details. I watched YouTube videos and I chatted with colored pencil artists. I bookmarked artist websites and signed up for newsletters and emails so I knew when their website was updated. I loved learning how far one can push the medium.

Then, I started practicing and practicing. I took my small sketchbook with me to the bus stop, to work, and on car trips. I practiced layering colors. I practiced seeing how many layers of wax the paper could take. I practiced creating the colors I remember in all of the journeys I have taken.

I have had a lot of fun learning. It was just as fun as the journeys I have taken if not more.

This is a quick glance of the stages of painting. The images were taken with my cell phone at the end of each day. In the final stages, I will add the highlights to the trees and develop more contrast in the foreground. I really want to show the light coming through the trees. In order to do this, I need to darken the shadows (deeper purple) and add highlights/details to the rocks.

Do you like adventure? Do you like viewing the scenic world at a fast pace? Do you like holding on to the door handle with your dear life? Then the Tail of the Dragon is just for you!This scenic trail was on Jim's list and being the loving wife I am, I went along for the ride. It was a beautiful car ride. The road was to take us through Alcola, Tennessee to US 129. I thought we had better stop to see if we were headed in the right direction (there were no signs for the Tail of Dragon along the way). We stopped at a McDonald's to inquire. I stopped one employee and asked, "Is this the way to the Tail of the Dragon?". The look on HIS face should have been my first clue and what he said SHOULD have been my second.. He said, yes and then said..Y'ALL BE CAREFUL! That didn't stop Jim...

We continued on..(why- not sure, but we did..) We found US 129, and the start of it, I said, "this is nothing, we drove sharper curves the day before..BUT that was ALL before the Tail actually started...

I quickly figured out when the Tail actually began. All I can say is...WOW. I had a blister on my hand from holding on to the door handles. 11 miles and over 350 sharps twists and turns.My stomach was so upset and I am sure all the pictures that were taken by people along the way were beautiful green images of me with one hand holding the door handle and the other holding my stomach. Jim didn't sweat..UNBELIEVABLE and he drove it! There were fast motorcycles everywhere! Fast cars, fast bikes, THESE PEOPLE ARE NUTS!!!I kept looking at my GPS and was so happy when I saw the end. That meant we were headed back home to Illinois! OH NO...BUT a second glance at the GPS suddenly put me a an UNhappy mood. I quickly saw that if we stayed on US 129 we would be going about 100 miles out of the way (in the wrong direction!). There was only one way out of this mess. GOING back the WAY WE CAME IN..YIKES!!!!!! 22 Miles and over 700 sharp twists and curves.. When it was all said and done, I looked at Jim and shook my head. He GOT THE LOOK!! NEVER AGAIN!!!!! He came out smiling. Unbelievable!

The Cherokee National Forest was the location of the Day #2 waterfall hike to Margarette Falls. Jim and I were both sore from the 6 mile hike to Panthertown the day before. I talked Jim into this hike since it was only a mile and half walk to the waterfall. (That is nothing,,,right???). After a few phone calls, we found the gravel parking lot. The internet said this was a 60 foot waterfall and I could hardly wait. It was a cool day and I was already very happy- several butterflies were in the area.

Since my hiking shoes broke the day before, I had to wear Jim's hiking sandals. They were about 3 sizes too big, but that was ok, it had to do, We were about to see a 60 foot waterfall- I WASN'T GOING TO LET BIG SHOES get in my way. I read online that this trail was scenic and rugged: All very true. This was the most beautiful hike I had ever been on. Once we reached the main sign post and took the trail, we could see and hear the creek. Since I was wearing the sandals, I stepped off the path several times, walked in the creek, and took some amazing pictures.

It was about halfway through the hike in the creek, Jim said, "you better watch for snakes". SNAKES- what??? but I didn't let that stop me. I journeyed in and out of the water- the only thing that was bothersome was the bugs yuck..AND a log that was covered with BIG BLACK disgusting worms. I had to crawl under it and I have never been more cautious in my entire life. I searched the entire log and found THE ONE square inch I could duck under. I escaped the booby trap, and took this picture,

This trail started as a path and then had us skipping across rocks. At one point, we were rock climbing (try this in big shoes!). I loved it. I thought we had found the waterfall, but Jim quickly realized that wasn't 60 foot, more like 10...Oops!! The bugs and worms and snakes must have been getting to me or I am just bad judge of distance..haha. The waterfall must be ahead....

I ran ahead of Jim on the trail- I had to see for myself. A short distance later, I found it! It was beautiful! I can honestly say..I was glad I listened to Jim!

The water was perfect! It was clear and cold. I love this picture I took of Jim. I think he thought the water was cold too!!!

I took a couple of pictures of the rocks. I am definitely painting the water and rocks. I love the abstract quality. I can't wait to paint this on canvas.

I started planning this trip a few months ago, There is one thing that cheers me up during the Midwest winters- planning a spring hiking trip. I had been looking forward to this hiking trip for a long time, I knew I wanted to explore North Carolina and I knew I wanted to see some waterfalls. I also wanted some adventure (traveling with my husband Jim always brings some exciting-and sometimes NOT so exciting adventure). I found the perfect trail. I did my research- it was an eight mile hike to 5 (YES 5) different waterfalls. This was a trail for us.

Once we found the parking area, we were ready to go. I had my hiking sandals and Jim had his new hiking boots. The map..well..wasn't the easiest to follow. It was the only one I could find on the internet, so it had to do. About a quarter mile into the hike, Jim couldn't get his headphones to work. I didn't want to turn around and head back to the car...I just couldn't. There were waterfalls to be seen. I gave Jim my pair of headphones and put his broken pair in my pocket.

AND then the adventure began...About a quarter mile later- MY sandal broke. I was so mad- I didn't have extra pair in the car. I knew I had to Macgyver it. Jim's old headphones did the trick!

I only had to adjust the tie every mile or so. It didn't take us long into the trail to figure out that either the map was wrong or we were headed the wrong way. We may not have followed the map, but we did find a nice waterfall- Greenland Creek falls. Jim stood behind the waterfall and took some amazing pictures.

This hike took us to the top of a mountain and one more waterfall. It was hard to estimate just how long we hiked, (I am guessing about 6 miles??) but all in all- it was a nice day. Oh, did I mention we saw a BEAR? Ok- maybe it was a small black dog behind a shrub- but nonetheless- it was an adventurous journey.