Saturday, 9 September 2006

I've been trying to cycle one of the hormones I'm on - a progesterol. The safe progesterone isn't easily available here in Australia, so I have to take a variant that has been known to cause depression.

Knowing it's chemically induced makes it easier to bear, but the timing is bad with the recent stress over the passport. Never mind, I've completed the 3 days a fortnight now, and I will be good for another 11 days. I had hoped that only taking it for 3 days would allow me to dodge the neurochemical imbalance, but it looks like I may have to discontinue entirely.

But it may not be entirely biochemical. This passport business has meant I've had to work 7 days a week for months now, so many letters written, so many trips to DFAT, and the National Library, so much legal research, so many legal appointments. And I've received some information which would indicate that the letter I received yesterday was not exactly in accordance with the regulations they're supposed to be following. That there is either malice or extraordinary incompetence involved.

So this morning, a reply to a parliamentary staffer who'd e-mailed me a few days ago, one stating the whole sorry, sordid mess. Preparing for questions in Parliament, if it comes to that.

I spent much of the night awake and crying. Must be the 'mones.

Well blow that for a joke, I'm going to have a cup of tea. Worse things happen at sea - including being stung by a ray. And as I was quietly sobbing, my little boy was cuddled up next to my back, reminding me of all the things that are truly important, and not mere transitory and inconsequential problems. Might even blog again today if I'm not too exhausted from sleep deprivation.

About Me

Actually, I am a Rocket Scientist.
Also hormonally odd (my blood has 46xy chromosomes anyway) and for most of my life, I looked male, and lived as one, trying to be the best Man a Gal could be. Anyway, in May 2005 that started changing naturally for reasons still unclear, and I'm now Zoe, not Alan : happier and more relaxed not to have to pretend any more.
UPDATE - reason now identified as the 3BHSD form of CAH.

Reviews

This blog, written by a rocket scientist, is a fascinating collection of information, both personal and scientific, regarding intersex, transsexualism and related psychosocial and psychosexual issues....It is erudite and heartfelt. Just read the posts about the passport issue. You won't know whether to laugh, weep or crawl into a ball and rock gently in a corner - an amazing person.- David---The reason I so appreciate bright, perceptive people - as opposed to ideologues whose intelligence does little to illuminate - is that they manage to both instruct and learn with a certain grace. Among such rarities in the transblogosphere is Zoe, whose direct speech and clear humanity always make her worth reading, even if one doesn’t always agree with her every conclusion.- Val---The following is a request for permission to archive your A.E.Brain blog site which we have wanted to do for several years...The Library has traditionally collected items in print, but it is also committed to preserving electronic publications of lasting cultural value....Since (1996) we have been identifying online publications and archiving those that we consider have national significance....We would like to include A.E.Brain blog site in the PANDORA Archive...-Australian National Library