Monday, September 27, 2010

A Long, Strange Trip

9 months. I haven't updated here in 9 months. That's a record, even for me, but my energies have been focused elsewhere. And when I consider the symbolism and meaning for humans of the term "9 months", I can tell myself that I'm giving birth to a new creation, and in fact have been reborn myself.

Nine months ago, I was coming out of a very dark place, and deciding that no, I wouldn't have a nervous breakdown after all. Given the events of last Fall, having mental health issues that would have required professional intervention beyond counseling or some happy pills was a real possibility. I skated right up to the edge of that, but was able to pull back in time with some help.

And how life has changed in the past year. If I'd had a crystal ball and had forseen my future, I still wouldn't have been able to believe all that has happened.

After living in Erie since 1998, I've moved. We're now down near Gettysburg in a tiny town called Fairfield. It's a beautiful area...lots of mountains and we live on a glorified pond that we call Lake Turner. I spend a lot of time pondering the incredible fact that I can drive through the heart of a Civil War battlefield to get to the grocery store.

I'm still not gainfully employed, which needs to change very soon, but it's been nice to have the time to be able to be home with the kids as Andy and I blend our families. He's a wonderful friend, and so obviously the person I should have been with all along.

He also cooks a mean lasagna.

I've been taking pictures again, which has been fun, and I'm interested in interacting with other people again, which is another change. Who knows what the future will bring, but it's nice to find myself enjoying the ride.

10 comments:

Lou
said...

Oh my gosh, my favorite blog is back in commission! And you are sharper than ever with the metaphors, the photos (your header is stunning), and the courage. Thanks, Amy. And now I'm hungry for lasagne!

In one way at least, I feel like I let you down. But in most other ways, I'm glad you escaped a place that should always be migratory, and that you have found happiness. And it's that last point that tells me you didn't let ME down! Good to see you active again, and give it your best shot...life flows on within you and without you!

I have to admit--I feel like I've been holding my breath for you for the last nine months, watching, hoping. And I feel like I just exhaled. It is so good to see you here on your blog again, so good to "hear" your voice again, so good to see your photos again! I'm happy for you friend, truly.

Beautiful, and so glad things are looking brighter for you. You have a real gift with writing your posts. I just want to keep reading because I love how the pictures correspond. Hope you'll come back more often!

Yay! You are back!!! I had almost given up on your blog and was about to delete it from my Favorites. I love your photography. You inspire me. Everyone deserves a little happiness in this life. I'm glad you found yours.

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All images copyright Amy Smith. Please don't steal my work and pass it off as your own. If you see something you'd like to use, feel free to ask.

To Do...

I'm a firm believer that telling others about our plans breeds accountability. So here are a few things that are on my to-do list this year. Not in order of importance:

1. Take a picture EVERY DAY2. Take a picture of myself at least once a week3. Quit smoking...AGAIN4. Learn more about my camera. (I still leave it on Auto when I can't figure out how to get the shot I want. Thank God for digital or I sure would be wasting a lot of film.)5. Participate. In POTD, in a local photography group, in LIFE.