Boxers or briefs? Comic Cowboys' Queen Eva tells all (photos)

MOBILE, Alabama – Easy lies the head that wears the crown, especially when he can relax with a malted beverage at noon on Lundi Gras.

His royal highness Queen Eva held court during float load at the Comic Cowboys’ barn, assuring everyone that he was all ready to roll on Fat Tuesday.

He’ll wear a newly purchased blonde wig and tiara and a specially made red-and-houndstooth dress to honor the University of Alabama. Oh yes, and he’ll wave a plunger in place of a scepter.

The members aren’t sure of the exact date that the so-named Queen Eva first made her appearance, but the Comic Cowboys’ figurehead has most likely always been a drag queen. In Dr. Sam Eichold’s 1984 book, “Without Malice,” a history of the organization, Eva is listed as being played by John Loris as early as 1936.

The 2014 Queen Eva was recently described by the Masked Observer as being “as wide as she is tall.” “He’s been working on his physique since birth,” a fellow Comic Cowboy remarked during Queen Eva's interview with Al.com on Monday.

How does a Comic Cowboy rise to this level? “You have to bribe someone.”

What are your responsibilities as queen? “My duties are to serve these guys as best I can and make them proud of me. … I’m also supposed to raise as much hell as I can.” (And one component of that, a fellow Cowboy said, was “kick-a-my-poo joy juice.” Alas, the ingredients are top secret.)

Tell us about your costume. “I got the tiara from a beauty shop in Prichard, and the wig from Sally Beauty Supply. My shoes are triple-E, 13-D, one red, one black.”

And the 'Bama dress was designed by you and your wife? “Yes. She hated every minute of it; she’s an Auburn fan. Her only input was the houndstooth bow on the back.” The dressmaker was Janice Roberts, but Queen Eva also wanted to give credit to Omar the Tent Maker, “brought in from India.”

Boxers or briefs? “Commando.”

Measurements? “A 55-inch waist and probably 2 inches less than that on the hips.” (And then there is Queen Eva’s vaunted 52 DD bosom. Queen Eva’s wife, who happens to be the granddaughter of beloved Cowboy Donald Smith, believes the rack dates from 1974, but on Monday, an elderly Cowboy insisted that the massive set was made in New Orleans in 1950. At any rate, the chesticles predate Watergate, and Mrs. Queen Eva said she cleaned them with liberal doses of Lysol. “When Michael Jackson sang about ‘the funk of 40,000 years,’ he’d never smelled anything like this,” she said.)

It’s an honor to be queen, yes? “I’ve looked forward to it and wanted to do it ever since I got in this organization.” (“Once he got off probation, he went right on the list,” a fellow Cowboy added.)