Children’s books generally fall into one of three categories; they’re either goofy and pointless, simplistic versions of adult stories or they’re education disguised as entertainment. Nearly any kids book you can think of can be categorized in those ways

I want you to look at something and know that it’s not my fault. I didn’t do this. I wouldn’t do this. But it’s a thing that happened and I never knew about it until just now, two years after the fact. Just look.

Poor Glenn, captured by Merle and ready to be tortured or whatever. And Glenn’s a pussy so you know this isn’t going to end well. I don’t mean that in a mean way, he’s heroic in a sneaky way. But like, face to face heroics? Nah.

Most movies this week came out on Wednesday instead of Friday because Black Friday cannot be interrupted for any reason and we’re all disgusting people. God forbid you can’t stream into Best Buy like pigs being let into a feeding pen so you can get $50 off of a TV you don’t need because let’s be honest, the people who camp out to get TVs clearly already have plenty of TVs at home, and probably a lot of Slim Jims.

So Thanksgiving is here and you don’t want to cook a turkey. Do you have a turkey? Well hey, maybe you should also go get some sweet and sour tongue and maybe cabbage soup because your dinner is already shit on a plate, no need to put in any more effort or anything is there, Chef Boyardee?

Don’t you just hate faded and discolored labia? And do you have any idea how long I, as a writer, have been waiting to type that sentence and have it be relevant to something? What a day for a daydream today is.

Rick is still insane and talking on the phone to people who can’t possibly be there. Let’s be honest, the entire premise of someone randomly dialing the phone in a world that hasn’t been functioning in several years is pretty weak ass. Who’s buying this? No one. But we’ll play along.

The world is rife with classic sayings. A rolling stone gathers no moss, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, you can’t take your pants off on the bus. There’s plenty to choose from and, as you might expect, the noble moustache has its share of sayings as well. Will they bless you with wisdom and insight? Maybe.

Oh man, this is some kind of week at the movies. It’s like Hollywood got drunk and woke up the next day and couldn’t explain what happened, there was just this crazy shit going on. And now we are the beneficiaries of it. Not sure what I mean? Good thing there’s a whole rest of this article to go.

The recent election in the US and the legalization of gay marriage in yet more states has made great strides for equality as it relates to sexuality. Back in the day, gay was the worst insult you could sling at someone on the schoolyard.