The almost true exploits of an intrepid spinster and her stitching...and all of the things that make up her crazy, happy, quiet little life.

Oct 18, 2010

DOES THIS FOOTBALL JERSEY MAKE MY BUTT LOOK BIG?

Moonlit Garden

Blackbird Designs

32ct. "Days Gone By" linen from Silkweaver

Weeks Dye Works threads

So I happy-danced my way around the living room last night with the recent addition of Moonlit Garden to my FUPPY box. (That's finished-unfinished-projects.) I only made two changes to the instructions on the chart this time: I changed the linen to a piece that I had in my stash and instead of using WDW Straw for the bricks and windows, I switched to Gentle Art Flax. The Straw just seemed to pinky-dinky for me.

The title of my post comes from Saturday, the day on which I watched Notre Dame play a football game. This in itself is not exactly unusual, but I must say that the boys' choice of outfits was. Apparently, the people at Adidas have developed some new fangled "compression" jersey that helps with aero-dynamics and such, but in my humble opinion, I think they looked like they were designed by a very peeved eliminated contestant from Project Runway.

(With all due respect to very peeved eliminated contestants from Project Runway, by the way.)

I'm sorry, but I don't think that getting a full-on view of armpit hair enhances my viewing experience in the least bit. And the way the shoulders were cut, you would think that these boys were actually wearing cute little tank tops intended for twelve year old girls to wear to a Jason Beeber concert. (You'll note that I don't have one damn idea of how to spell the kid's name. I just know that every time he sings Happy Birthday on that American Cancer Society commercial I want to take my new Ginghers to his stupid little haircut.)

I don't get it...if you were flinging yourself around outside and crashing into everybody and everything within a mile radius and breaking bones and such, wouldn't you want MORE covering yourself rather than LESS? Wouldn't you want your jersey to be made of something padded and substantial and have the magic ability to protect your flesh AND make you look thirty pounds lighter at the same time? Wouldn't you want everybody in the world to say "Wow. Look at that jersey. I think I need to run right out to my local WalMarts and get me one of them."

Instead, the Fighting Irish looked like they were the latest additions to the Village People.

(And that, most definitely, is with all due respect the the Village People. I love them with all that is holy and will be the first in line to buy tickets if they ever decide to come to South Bend for a concert.)

I guess this is why I will never fulfill my lifelong dream of playing professional football.

Or any other professional sport, come to think about it.

Does stitching qualify as a sport?

We should look into that and get started on our jerseys.

******EDITED TO ADD********

Apparently, the fancy schmancy jerseys are called TECHFIT jerseys by adidas, and there are several commercials on the YouTube explaining all about them.

Ah Justin Bieber. I'd never heard of him until my friend convinced me to look him up. I saw his hair and considered breaking up your friendship lol! (Decided not to, but if we go on a road trip I get to pick the music)

Moonlit garden is absolutely gorgeous! Just GORGEOUS! And I am sooooooo jealous that you have finished yours while mine sits waiting for me to finish my exchange stitching. Dang it. My fingers are itching to get back to it.

As for the ND unifirms I haven't a clue. But they do sound pretty yucky to me too.

I'm with you too - I'm old school - at least as far as football jersey. Now, looking back at Wilt the Stilt in his basketball shorts from long ago - well, those were too darned short back then. You have to laugh when you see pictures from that time.

And please take a pair of scissors to Bieber's hair. That kid drive me nuts.

I think this blog is hilarious!!! I have wanted to comment but can't seem to get Google to understand that yes, I do have an account and that yes, this is the password!!! Grrr! Anyway, I shared you comments about Justin Beiber with my 17 year old son (who has his own ideas about Justin) and I think he's still laughing. And I agree with the underarm hair statement. It ranks right up there with butt cracks. I love football but, really, TMI.

While I can actually comment (with my son's account) I have to tell you how much I LOVED the post about setting your hair on fire!!! I laughed so hard that I think I wet myself! And not because you had done it, but because that is JUST LIKE something I would do!!!Are we twins separated at birth? If I didn't know my Mom really well I might think so!

Keep the good stuff coming. I read every post. And I want to be Best Friends. (Is that creepy? I'm not the least bit creeperish--unless you count menopause. And that's really more crabbiness. Or hot flashes. Whatever. Oh, well...maybe I'll see myself on TV as some weird blogstalker or something. Warnings will go out on all types of mass media and my internet access will be forever denied. More time for stitching! Yea! See, there's always a bright side. I wonder if they allow needles and scissors in internet blogstalker prison?) Anyway, I'll be lurking until Google figures me out....so, like, forever.

I, too, along with Devon's mom, feel as though I'm a blogstalker on your site. I go to your site a couple times each day and when you haven't written, my attitude is, "Where is she??? Doesn't she know I want to read her blog every day???"

I do want to thank you for unknowingly encouraging me to get my finished pieces framed. Took advantage of Michael's sale for my two biggest pieces. Even with the 55% off, I had to grab hold of the counter when I heard what I owed. Then took 8 pieces (one from 2004!) to a local framer who normally doesn't give % off but did give me 20% off. There goes everyone's Christmas gifts this year.

Lovely finishes as always. I would not waste my Ginghers trying to cut that mop on that Bieber kid, it would no doubt dull them beyond all repair. At first I couldn't tell if that was the world's most complicated combover, combaround, swirly, whatever, or in fact he was carrying a dead squirrel on his head. At any rate, I think a chain saw would be more effective.