When I open the door the smell was incredible. “The wee bastards’s s**te had landed in the grate, it was all over the place! “It was all on the rug in front of the fire. There’s no way it’ll brush out. What the hell am i going to say to the insurance? ‘Och, a ned shat down the chimney’? “If I get my hands on the little bastard I’ll kick him so hard in the arse he’ll never sh*t again.” A source at Grampian Police said the crime was “Unpleasant and unusual”.

When I open the door the smell was incredible. “The wee bastards’s s**te had landed in the grate, it was all over the place! “It was all on the rug in front of the fire. There’s no way it’ll brush out. What the hell am i going to say to the insurance? ‘Och, a ned shat down the chimney’? “If I get my hands on the little bastard I’ll kick him so hard in the arse he’ll never sh*t again.” A source at Grampian Police said the crime was “Unpleasant and unusual”.

Before anyone asks: no, that was not me.

Logged

As time goes by, you will seeThat we're going to be free, you and meWe'll touch the skyCan you see in your mind's eye that we are oneWe're all the same and life is just a simple game.

When I open the door the smell was incredible. “The wee bastards’s s**te had landed in the grate, it was all over the place! “It was all on the rug in front of the fire. There’s no way it’ll brush out. What the hell am i going to say to the insurance? ‘Och, a ned shat down the chimney’? “If I get my hands on the little bastard I’ll kick him so hard in the arse he’ll never sh*t again.” A source at Grampian Police said the crime was “Unpleasant and unusual”.