Help with my Father's Estate

Dad passed in October without a will. I am one of eight siblings and am the Administrator of his estate. The problem is the eight of us have never been able to agree on anything! Right now, I need to make a decision on the most fair and equitable manner in which to disperse of the estate. I feel an auction would be best. Any advise would be appreciated.
Thank you,
PL

A lot depends upon the nature of the estate. Auctions are usually
quick, but there may be resentments after the fact if the money isn't
what is expected-depending on your siblings. I don't envy your
situation, but I would say that a consult with an attorney would most
likely be quite beneficial. There are different laws in different
states that may apply as well.

My condolences on your father's passing. I hope it was peaceful...God
bless and I wish you the best in this.

I have an attorney lined up. I have had the estate appraised, the guy
said he would appriase at what he would expect things to bring at
auction rather than what he thought it would cost to replace them.
Some family members want to buy the estate, some want to auction,
there has even been mention of a tag sale. The closed auction sounds
like a good idea. All I have asked is if someone buys the estate,
they are responsible for clearing out the house. My other concern is
that by selling the contents to a sibling, is it fair to the others
that it didn't go on the open market? It's not a lot of money, but I
have some family members that eally could use it more than others.
That's my dilemma.Thanks for your response.PL

Have an independent appraiser determine the value of the entire estate
(house and all) on the open market (not a real estate agent, who may
lowball it to buy you out cheap), and let that be the price if a family
member wants to
buy out the others, and divide the proceeds equally. If they can't buy
it outright cash, then a mortgage
of some sort will have to be set up.

What do you mean some "could use it more than others"? I don't mean to
be nosy, but it can cause even more resentment depending on whether the
others agree with you or not. For example, if someone was a drug
addict or alchoholic, I might give them some money for a live-in kick-
the-habit
program, but only if they were serious, and tie up getting the rest of
their share to staying clean. Someone who is in frivolous debt up to
their eyeballs shouldn't get extra bailout money (that's why I'm a big
fan of equal shares). I read somewhere that if you have disabled people
to provide for, you have to leave them money the right way (a special
needs trust, I think it is called), or then they are no longer able to
get any government aid because they have too many assets. See a lawyer
for that.

So, overall, whatever you do, I think equal shares across the board is
the way to go. Oh yes, be sure to deduct your fair share of expenses
from the estate, not from your own pocket.

Phil, you dont mention if your siblings are all the same gender if
not then you should consider that in some families the boys wind up
with all the 'boys stuff' and the girls get left with the 'girls
stuff'. Now this might be ok but it gets a bit unfair if your mum
went without for years so that dad could add to his collection of
antique motor cycles.

Dad didn't really have a lot. The Contents of the house was appraised
at
-- Phil Long (pl1433@aol.com), January 17, 2002.

Phil, have you fully apprised the other family members of these facts,
including that you and your brother are going to charge a fair amount
for your time against the estate?

If they can't come to an agreement (say Sally and John both want an
armoire) in a reasonable amount of time (say 30 days), sell everything,
and split the money up evenly. You should not be tied up forever over
mere material goods, you have a life, too. Point that out to them as
well. It is bad enough to be grieving and then have to deal with family
arguments over "stuff". I'm thinking of you.

Phil, my mother got stuck in the same position you are in now. Her
solution was to put a price tag on each item in the house. Every
sibling got a certain amount of "money" in their account. They could
use this imaginary money to "buy" items they wanted. If more than
one person wanted the same item, their names were put into a hat and
a drawing was held. The one whose name was drawn got the item and
the appropriate amount was deducted from the person's account. They
used imaginary money because one of the sisters didn't have the cash
to actually pay for anything up front. Some were disappointed, some
were downright P.O.'d for a little while, but in the end they all
knew it was fair and got over it. I don't know if this will work for
you or not, but it might. Good luck.

Phil, I am so sorry for the jam you are in. The bad thing is that no
matter what you do, it won't be right in your sibling's eyes. Why not
have the estate auction on a date when all siblings could attend. That
way the highest bidder gets the pieces that everyone wants (even if an
outsider ends up with it, your sibling didn't want to shell out the
money for it). The money is split among all siblings, end of story.
Of course chances are the story will never end because your siblings
are going to be resentful no matter what you do. Good luck, let us
know what happens. And for you people out their without a will- is
this what you want happening after your gone?

Dear Phil-----
Oh my----you are left in the hot seat----
Phil for many years my hubby & I have bought out households just like
your Dad's. We go in & look around & give a bid on the whole house
hold----from the underware in the drawers to the cleaner under the
sink & all the rest---
Then I recommend to family /what I feel are Antiques or family
keepsakes--that could bring more money if sold to dealers/ or
sold /or kept by family---
now I'm old so not all people are as honest any more about those
things----
but there are many still out there /who do buy out house holds!!
We don't do it any more------as we have gotten tooo old & it is too
much work for us---
I have also worked with friends who do estate sales----they go in &
price everything---second day prices go down on things that have not
sold & then usually 3rd day the price is half---
the company that does the sale usually gets a flat rate for doing the
sale & then a percentage of things sold. This gives the family a
chance to buy things that are priced by the estate sale appraisers.

I have sold things at auction & it is usually was a buyers market---I
won't ever sell anything at auction again--- I buy at auctions but
not sell!!!!

The house could be sold by owner---at appraised price----is an option

These are just a few options----
maybe you have thought of them all-----but I just wanted you to know--
-that with working with most families /that no one can agree-on who
should get what----an estate sales company /who comes in & appraises
& prices everything for an estate sale has worked well-----as
everyone has to buy at the appraised price at the estate sale---
When my hubby & I bought out house holds we went in & bought it all---
-moved it out all & cleaned up after & it was a clean & empty house
when we were through----since we bought everything we usually asked
the owners to get more than one bid------
then they saw /we had done our very best to deal the best we could---
also I will remind you /I also told family of what was antiques if
they were not aware & what was probably family keepsakes---that
family should keep--etc/etc/
I also helped them find dealers for the antiques & sometimes I was
the top bidder on those things also!!
I have worked with families like yours for over 30 years---all I can
tell you---is you can't please everyone & if you are a God fearing
man pray about it---make the decision you feel is the best one you
can make & then just live with it--knowing you did the best you could
& you can't please everyone & then if you have not made out your own
will----do so as soon as you can!!!!
I have worked for 30 years with people who have had the same
decisions to make you are haveing to do---& I know it is not easy &
you can't please everyone----
I can tell you are a careing man---& I'm sure what ever decision you
make it will be fine----I'm sure that is the reason your were the one
choosen to take this task----may God be with you!!