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Sunday, 28 February 2016

Maybe it’s an age thing, but being single doesn’t really
bother me all that much… about 99 times out of 100. That’s probably because I’m
at that point of transitioning into full-on adulthood where I have a lot of
other shit to worry about day-by-day. Of course, on that one day out of 100, it
does end up getting me ever so slightly. And by “slightly”, I mean I start
looking like I should be listening to Simple Plan all friggin’ day. Being the
social hermit that I am, talking with people isn’t necessarily something I am
equipped to deal with these days. With this in mind, and everything I’ve said
previously about what I’ve learnt from films, there’s that added layer of
irritating that comes with most rom-coms. It’s kind of like hanging out with
people who go on about how great their relationship is going and how much work it is to maintain; on
both sides, it only serves to annoy. Probably explains why these are usually
considered date movies in the first place; watching them while single isn’t
exactly the best idea in the world. Regardless, here I am fulfilling my
self-imposed obligation to see a film that I’m not exactly frothing at the
mouth to go see. Let’s discover why. This is How To Be Single.

Saturday, 27 February 2016

Maybe it’s as a result of the certain brand of critic that I
took inspiration from to start reviewing films in the first place, but there
are times when I wonder if maybe I’m a little too harsh on certain films. Oh sure, stuff like Vacation and War Room most assuredly deserve every fireball I throw their way, but what about
the smaller productions? Like, say, The Quarantine Hauntings from last year?
Every so often, given how relentlessly I tore the thing apart, I wonder if I
was maybe too hard on it given its lower budget and limited release. Then
again, I’ve seen amazing low budget films like Lead Me Astray and amazingly
awful blockbusters like Pan, so I’m already of the opinion that films are
capable of being held to the same standard across the board. Every film gets
the same treatment, no question about it. So, with that protecting-my-own-arse
clause out of the way, let’s get started with today’s film already. This is
Three Wise Cousins.

Thursday, 25 February 2016

Michael Bay: A name synonymous with Hollywood hackery,
thanks in no small part to his generally woeful Transformers film series. And
yet, at least in the last couple of years, I find myself defending the guy?
Okay, let me rephrase that. I’m defending the guy’s recent output which, for various reasons, I can easily say shows some
definite improvement from the guy who gave Deep Wang and “I’m directly below
the enemy scrotum”. Between the genuinely great satire of Pain & Gain, the
leap in the right direction of Transformers: Age Of Extinction and even the
surprisingly decent Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film, I can easily say that I
was properly looking forward to this one. I mean, there is a place in the world for Bay’s style of bona fide excess of
America, Fuck Yeah; I just wish that his latest would more resemble The Rock
than The Fallen. So, are we gonna get another Shyamalan? Only one way to find
out. This is 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi.

Friday, 19 February 2016

It’s a Kevin Hart film. No use writing an intro that will
just repeat what I’ve said overandover again on this blog before. Besides,
the less time I have to dedicate to this stupidity, the better. This is Ride
Along 2.

Monday, 15 February 2016

More so than any other comic book film that has been
released during my lifetime, like The Avengers or X-Men or even The Dark Knight
Rises, this is the one that I have
been waiting for. Then again, given the character’s lauded reputation and fan
base, I’m sure that that is true for most fanboys in the world. Deadpool is not
only one of my favourite comic book characters, but might be one of my
favourite fictional characters ever:
His unique fourth-wall breaking personality probably gives the most freedom of
any graphic novel character, almost like a living TARDIS in terms of story
possibility. Just to be clear, this guy once mugged Queen Elizabeth for her
clothing and teamed up with a group
of robotic animals to take down an orca in a robot suit. Under regular circumstances,
I’d say that this is that rare property that is impossible to screw up, but
then again we all know far too well that someone managed to do just that. But,
even with all the admittedly brilliant marketing behind it and the recognition
it has already garnered from fans and newcomers alike, does this still hold up
given how long we’ve been wanting this film to surface? This is Deadpool.

Sunday, 14 February 2016

Along with the better appreciations for the names of
directors attached to a film, which has led me to go back through their
filmographies in prep for their latest as you’ve probably noticed on this blog
already, I have also taken note of specific writers as well. While last year
got me to really take note of Mr. Alex Garland, whom I can only hope continues
his ride in the director’s chair, it also gave me my first proper exposure to
that footy-loving music junkie Nick Hornby. His penned film Wild mainly made my
list thanks to the amazing production qualities of the overall film, I’d be
lying if I said that this guy’s spellbindingly warm writing didn’t factor into
it as well. As such, when the posters came in for his latest write-up, it
became one of those situations where I knew I’d check it out regardless of my
current compulsions. But, even though I fixate on the writing of films far more
than I probably should if I want to keep my film buff membership ID card, I
still admit that that is only one part of a larger process that is filmmaking.
So, even with my affinity for the writer’s work aside, how does today’s film
fare out? This is Brooklyn.

Saturday, 13 February 2016

Viking horns that make Loki look subtle, the final answer to
“Was it really Adam and Steve?”, Tyson somehow outdoing his feud with B.o.B in terms of meme-worthiness and
a climax so ridiculous that not even the film is sure whether to follow through with it
or not… yeah, this is a strange sit, one that kind of defies my usual attempts
as pseudo-profundity. This is Zoolander 2.

Friday, 12 February 2016

Ben Stiller, as a presence in Hollywood, frankly mystifies
me. For a person who seems to have as much of an axe to grind on the
establishment as he does, he sure spends a lot of his time in patently weaker
productions. Sure, it’s as an actor, but it does feel like the game is playing
him at times. I mean, the Meet The Parents series took a very steep decline that
I can only hope is at its end and the Night At The Museum films, while okay
diversions for kids, had way too much L.A. sheen to really buy into why Stiller
would sign on for them… aside from the pay packet, of course. Meanwhile, behind
the camera, he’s made films like the epitome of clever filmmaking about dumb
characters with Zoolander, the underrated comedic thriller The Cable Guy and
let’s not forget his masterpiece as a satirical firebrand with Tropic Thunder.
Something tells me that there was a bit of reality-influenced casting that went
into his role in last year’s While We’re Young. Anyway, once again as prep for
a newly-released film by the same director, time to take a look at his last release
that falls under my purview. This is The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty.

Monday, 8 February 2016

While I have talked at length before about the nebulous
concept of ‘Oscar bait’, and how this time of year just before the Oscars is
usually the big dumping ground for its ilk around here, I fear I may have
misrepresented it just a touch. I have usually attributed that term to what
most people consider to be prestige pictures: Period pieces usually dealing
with the important social issue of the day; bonus points if it’s set during
World War II and/or involves Nazis. Well, only recently by my own admission, I
have realized that there is another type of Oscar bait out there: The
over-conceptualized, over-cooked ‘thought experiments’ that are meant to be
challenging but, more times than not, usually end up getting slapped with the
Pretentious label whether it’s warranted or not. It’s the kind of space that
arthouse hacks like Malick occupy. Yeah, I more than acknowledge that I may be
in the minority on this, but I will not
submit when it comes to how much the Academy unconditionally loves this guy and
work that feels even remotely like his. Not to say that the hyper-intellectual type of Oscar
bait is inherently bad; after all, Academy favourite Charlie Kaufman well and
truly fills that gap and he is easily one of the most fascinating, if not always
coherent, cinematic minds still working today. Yeah, time to actually put on
that film snob hat for once; would be a shame if I didn’t wear it even once. This
is Anomalisa.

Sunday, 7 February 2016

I hate Apple. That’s probably a statement that is both
echoed frequently and also usually done as a means of drawing aggro, but I
stand by it: I hate Apple. And yes, as I type this, I am also checking my
emails on my iPhone, so trust me when I say that I understand the hypocrisy
that can come with such a statement. From their addition to the effort of
homogenizing the entire world, rivalling Starbucks in their ubiquity, to just
the sheer audacity of their business model that ultimately only serves to
fatten wallets and landfills in equal measure and velocity. But, that’s not to
say that I’m going to let any of this filter my opinion of today’s film. I just
want to reiterate a point I made back in Citizenfour, where hatred for the original
subject shouldn’t translate to insta-hate on part of the film. I may have a
real issue with the company that hipsters rally under like beige Lemmings, but
I have enough faith in director Danny Boyle and writing legend Aaron Sorkin to
portray one of its key figures in a compelling enough fashion. This is Steve
Jobs.

Friday, 5 February 2016

Like an irritating rash on the collective backside of
cinema, Nicholas Sparks always comes back. For some mind-numbingly stupid
reason, that I can assume involves some form of green paper, we’ve gone from
getting only one adaptation every few years to getting one every year. The fact that two more of these fit within my purview
for reviewing only makes that feel worse. I’ve discussed a couple of these on
here before, like the head-on collision between hackneyed platitudes about
destiny and accidental Freudianism that was The Best Of Me or the bordering on
parody schlock The Longest Ride. Given how I haven’t taken the time to check
out his one ‘good’ work with The Notebook, I am once again at the point where I
can only hope for unintentional comedy as my source of joy for this nearly two-hour piece of work. This is The
Choice, something I made poorly.

Monday, 1 February 2016

Over the last year and a bit that I’ve had this blog, I’ve
talked before about people that are quote-unquote “easy targets”; people
involved in films that, for one reason or another, it has become perfectly
acceptable to mock. Sure, I still have my stable running joke of Jai Courtney
being attached to mostly horrible films, but for the most part I am willing to
let this kind of mindset go. The reason for that should be made most obvious by
today’s film: Director/co-writer Tom McCarthy’s last film was the previously
reviewed The Cobbler, a production that some people are still trying to insist
is Adam Sandler’s worst film; and the other co-writer Josh Singer’s last effort
was the much-maligned The Fifth Estate. Of course, maybe it helps that the
above films are usually attributed as being an Adam Sandler and Benedict
Cumberbatch film respectfully, meaning that they get the brunt of the blame for
them despite the definite reality of things. In any case, now that they have a
genuine winner on their hands, it seems like the need for scorn has ended… that
is, until the next one comes along and the process starts all over again.
Anyway, tangent, I have an actual film to talk about here: This is Spotlight.