“They misunderstood that Topps guy and have since amended their blog; Topps did nothing wrong,” Bernstein told Deadspin. “They mistook his saying that he knew me, as me saying it was OK to sign. Very harmless, and they are sorry to have caused any trouble. I’ve been working with Topps for many years, and they are far above this.”

“Topps man sir. We sorry. JB explaining that he knowing this man and he not believe man doing these things. he say we not understanding right. Dinesh and i all things new being to us. we wishing many time we just being pitcher, but we also knowing all other things too needed.”

If these are the kinds of wacky shenanigans that are going on with Rinku and Dinesh, I only have one thing to add: Get them on TV now. This type of hilarity needs to be on film so fat, lazy Americans can openly mock them, only to realize that the mocking does nothing to fill their empty, hollow lives.