The Country Questionnaire

February 5, 2009 by C.M. Wilcox

Discussion posts are fun, but I feel like a bum when I run them too often… so I made a questionnaire, which is like 25 discussions all wrapped into one. If you’d like to play along, copy and paste the list into the comment box and fill in as many answers as you’d like. I’ll add my own answers as a comment so that you’ll be able to consider the questions for yourself before seeing my responses. Sounds like fun, right? I know.

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio:
2. Worst imaginable duet partner:
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song:
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time:
5. Least convincing outlaw poser:
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it:
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care:
8. Female guilty of oversinging:
9. Male guilty of oversinging:
10. Should stop trying to write own songs:
11. Least likely to stagedive:
12. Number of country blogs you read daily:
13. Records the same thing over and over:
14. Most distracting hairstyle:
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote:
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery:
17. The opposite of Dale Watson:
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job:
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood:
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney:
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject:
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired:
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up:
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall:
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show:

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: “Country Boy” by Alan Jackson
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Taylor Swift
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Chuck Wicks
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Reba
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: No opinion.
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Faith Hill
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: John Rich
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Gary LeVox
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Shania, if only to add some variety to her stuff.
11. Least likely to stagedive: Reba
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 5
13. Records the same thing over and over: Dierks Bentley
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Jimmy Wayne’s current one.
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: WAY too many to choose from.
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: I second Julianne Hough.
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Taylor Swift
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Chuck Wicks
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: No opinion.
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Get stranded on that island that plagues your music.
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: “It’s Not Supposed To Go Like That” by Rascal Flatts
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: It’s hard not to argue with CMW’s pick.
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Reba
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 10
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Mariah Carey

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: “Every Day” or pretty much anything from those rascals.
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Julianne Hough
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: John Rich (“I’m so good I can totally make this work.”)
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: George Strait, the first tape I ever bought, Ocean Front Property.
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Hard to say, but I know I’d be surprised if I actually met some ofthese guys.
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Merle Haggard, George Strait, anything unreleased by Waylon (but preferably without the .357s).
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Taylor Swift, there are fans out there that believe she can do this.
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Martina or Carrie
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Yep, they’re right, Le Vox
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Kenny Chesney, you’re in a rut.
11. Least likely to stagedive: George Jones
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 4-5
13. Records the same thing over and over: God knows I love him and it works, but George Strait.
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Gary LeVox in a landslide.
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: The fact that he announced to the world who Johnny Cash would have voted for this past election. Unbelievable.
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Carrie Underwood. Too much success too fast for people. I don’t like her music and don’t listen to it but she takes more heat than she deserves. Without a poster child for pop-country selling huge amounts of records there is no one for the pissed off outlaw or indie singer-songwriter to rebel against. Without the Nashville Sound and Countrypolitan we may never get WIllie & Waylon free of the constructs of Nash Vegas. So, it’s kinda a good thing…kinda.
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: A whale in a Datsun? j/k Billy Gillman.
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Jessica Simpson.
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: He could steal Haymaker from the Gourds or how about “the other guy.” But whatever you do don’t call him Kristen Hall.
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Look bro, you can cut anything you want now and people will buy it, so how about finding some really good songs that don’t mention tiki bars and recording about a dozen of them. Jimmy Buffett is probably gonna get pissed eventually. I mean I like the beach too, but…
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Buddy Jewell
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: CMW’s got it. I’m from a smalltown and it’s awesome. Here’s some of the things that are in that small town. That and high school boys.
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Kellie Pickler
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: My 13 year old cousin loves her in a kinda cute way still, so maybe 16 or 17.
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: New Kid on the Block, Oh-Oh Oh Oh Oh…

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: Almost anything by Rascal Flatts
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Taylor Swift
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Carrie Underwood
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Randy Travis
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: not sure
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Gene Watson
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: John Rich
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Gary LeVox
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Too many to mention, but right now I’m thinking Dierks Bentley
11. Least likely to stagedive: Alan Jackson
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 5 or 6
13. Records the same thing over and over: Alan Jackson (sorry)
14. Most distracting hairstyle: pass
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: I try to avoid him as much as possible
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: kellie Pickeler (she can’t really be that dim, can she?)
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Carrie Underwood
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: John Rich (would antagonise every single co-worker and get fired)
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: Who? (Oh yes, he’s the other one in Lady Antebellum, right? So Who? still works for me)
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Retire
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: have to think about that one
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: I’m so country I have to tell you so in the lyrics, incessantly (because actually you’d never realise from the actual music)
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: John Rich
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: Whatever age at which you get over being tone deaf
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: pass

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: How many are we allowed to answer? I’ll say “I saw God Today”, it’s a fan fav I know, but that’s one stupid song.
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Martina McBride
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Keith Urban
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: ‘hangs head in shame’ Garth Brooks
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Eric Church
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Mike Stinson
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: noone, if anyone could part the sea (or equally as unlikely put out a great legit country record) I’d care.
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: James Otto
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: ha.
11. Least likely to stagedive: Ray Price
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 3
13. Records the same thing over and over: Martina
14. Most distracting hairstyle: James Ingram
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: sort of obscure, but when he ran down that contestant on Gone Country for not being sincere enough about country music.
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Taylor Swift
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Chuck Wicks, alternately, nothingness
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Garth
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: who?
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: take a long vacation, like, a really long one
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Eric Church – Lightning, that or his two pink lines. I hate that guys’ songs.
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: “don’t worry, everything is ok, I’m so lucky, omg”
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: James Otto
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 15
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Richard Marx

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: America by Rodney Atkins
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: The guy from Sugarland
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: John Michael Montgomery
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Blake Shelton
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Trent Tomlinson
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Blake Shelton
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Lonestar
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Terri Clark
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Kenny Chesney
11. Least likely to stagedive: Wynonna
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 1
13. Records the same thing over and over: Kenny Chesney
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Brett Manning from the Can You Duet show
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: This town’s all about getting pussy.
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Writers of Honkytonk Badonkadonk
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Watson Dale
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Danielle Peck
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: ‘Thanks Guys’ Haywood
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Rich on no talent? I want wisdom from him.
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Alyssa Lies
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: The song about how country I am.
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Craig Morgan
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 40
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Whoever wins American Idol

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: Anything by Taylor Swift
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: See above
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: John Michael Montgomery
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Garth Brooks
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: James Otto
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: George Strait
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Carrie Underwood
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carry Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Gary Levox
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Alan Jackson
11. Least likely to stagedive: Merle Haggard
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 3
13. Records the same thing over and over: Rascal Flatts
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Gary Levox
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: Don’t care
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Jennifer Nettles’ accent
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Taylor Swift
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: John Rich
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: That One
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: I enjoy the island music, but mix in a little more country like your earlier stuff.
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: “It’s Not Supposed To Go Like That” – Rascal Flatts
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: country life
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Brooks & Dunn
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: It never should have been there to begin with.
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Justin Timberlake

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: Most Taylor Swift songs
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Taylor Swift
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Martina McBride
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Randy Travis
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: don’t know
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Carrie Underwood
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Taylor Swift
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: James Otto
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Sorry, Alan Jackson
11. Least likely to stagedive: Randy Travis
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 5
13. Records the same thing over and over: Toby Keith
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Gary Levox
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: “I know who Johnny Cash would vote for” C’mon..
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Gretchen Wilson
17. The opposite of Dale Watson:Charles Kelley
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: John Rich-his mouth would get in the way.
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: “the ugly one”
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: “Vocal Coach”
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject:
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: “Cheaters”
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Jason Aldean
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: Why would I have her on my wall? AS a “bullseye?”
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Anyone who can get them more fans but yet not bigger than they are.

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: anything by Carrie Underwood
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Carried Underwood
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Rascal Flatts
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Terri Clark
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Rhett Atkins
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Miranda Lamber
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Carrie Underwood
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Carrie Underwood
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Gary LeVox
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Taylor Swift
11. Least likely to stagedive: Taylor Swift
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 5
13. Records the same thing over and over: Keith Urban
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Rascal Flatts
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: any of them….
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Trent Tomlinson…
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: ????
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Kellie Pickler
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: no clue
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: stop trying to be the next Jimmy Buffet
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject:
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired:????
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: depends on how this economy keeps going….
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: that would mean that I have them on my wall, that would be the hubby who adores her
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Britney Spears

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: anything by Taylor Swift
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Taylor Swift
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Taylor Swift (no, not really – too much young ego to record an ‘old’ standard)
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: CDB, Skynyrd, Trick Pony (RIP)
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Jason Aldean
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Alison Krauss, Miranda, Shooter
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Carrie
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Martina
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Phil Vassar
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Taylor Swift, please just disappear
11. Least likely to stagedive: Chris LeDoux (sorry)
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 3-4
13. Records the same thing over and over: Chesney
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Jamey Johnson and his facial hair. somewhere under that beard is a decent looking man
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: just remember I play for tips (OK, so it’s a lyric)
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Dixie Chicks for their politics
17. The opposite of Dale Watson: Jessica Simpson
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Jessica Simpson – remember when she had that reality show with ex-husband Nick? Dumber than a box of rocks.
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: “Hay (sic) you?”
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Don’t buy a house in Key West if you don’t intend to move in. In this economy you’ll lose.
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Alyssa Lies
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: Martina’s victim songs
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Bucky Covington (hits?)
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 18 max
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Eminem

2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Jessica Simpson
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Sugarland
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Shania Twain
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Shania Twain
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Shania Twain
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Martina McBride
10. Should stop trying to write own songs:
11. Least likely to stagedive:
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 5
13. Records the same thing over and over: George Strait
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Shania Twain
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: John Rich
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Learn to be humble
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Dixie Chicks
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: Singing about being country
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Kenny Chesney

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: country boy, alan jackson/ bob that head, rascal flatts,any song by carrie underwood or juliane hough, she’s country by jason aldean, and i’ll stop now
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: rascal flatts and carrie underwood
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: rascal flatts
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: keith urban
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: Jason Aldean
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: miranda lambert
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: kenny chesney
8. Female guilty of oversinging: carrie underwood and martina
9. Male guilty of oversinging:
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: carrie underwood
11. Least likely to stagedive: george strait
12. Number of country blogs you read daily: 0-2
13. Records the same thing over and over: kenny chesney
14. Most distracting hairstyle: jason michael carrol
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote:
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery:
17. The opposite of Dale Watson:
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: juliane hough
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: woodie
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: try to sing a song about a new subject with no beach
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject:
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: country pride
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: alan jackson (sorry, but that’s what his new cd seems to be)
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 16
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: Carrie Underwood or Juliane Hough

9. Male guilty of oversinging:
Gary LeVox (lead singer of Rascal Flatts)
He doesn’t need to he has great voice . . . now if he’d only put it to better use.

10. Should stop trying to write own songs:
Umm … Carrie Underwood.
Every songwriter has GOT to be sending her their best songs, right?
Where are they?
I only see a couple. :o/

11. Least likely to stagedive:
George Strait or Dolly Parton.
LMBO
Could you imagine?! ROTFL

12. Number of country blogs you read daily:
4

13. Records the same thing over and over:
Ummm … Kenny Chesney and his island songs.
I like a few but for the most part they are unrelatable to us poor folks who don’t have $$ to fly off to the islands. :o(((
Also Rodney Adkins.
Love him personally though.

14. Most distracting hairstyle:
Joe Don’s of Rascal Flatts, often looks like roadkill

15. Favorite John Rich anecdote:
that stupid ‘Gone Country’ series of his on CMT @@

16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery:
Jessica Simpson
(not a huge fan of her music, although she doesn’t make me squirm)
But leave the girl alone already!

17. The opposite of Dale Watson:
Don’t know enough about him to answer this one

19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood:
I’m a LOST junkie so he totally reminds me of the character Daniel Faraday, the physicist.

Well, doesn’t he?!?!?

20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney:
Quit bragging about how many sexual partners you have had! (Was that article true?)
*ICK*
It #1. makes you look like a jerk (even though we know your not a choir boy)
or
#2. makes you appear to play for the other team
(which, ya’ll, is the context in which he made the comments, just so ya know)

Unclassy to say the least.

21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject:
Dixie Chicks
That ‘Not Ready To Make Nice’ STILL ticks me off.
If it were about a different topic, I may have liked it.

22. Song topic that really needs to be retired:
Songs about skanky bar girls wearing next to nothing and the way they move.
*hand me a bucket, barf*

23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up:
I’ll say Kenny Chesney ’cause he never really has been. (not meant as an insult)

24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall:
19

1. Song that makes you turn off the radio: “Tequila on ice” by Darryl Worley
2. Worst imaginable duet partner: Keith Urban
3. Most likely to remake a Michael Bolton song: Phil Vassar
4. Singer you’ve followed for the longest time: Gary Allan/Alan Jackson
5. Least convincing outlaw poser: John Rich
6. Could release anything and you’d buy it: Gary Allan
7. Could part the sea and you wouldn’t care: Phil Vsssar
8. Female guilty of oversinging: Kellie Pickler/Martina
9. Male guilty of oversinging: Deirks Bentley
10. Should stop trying to write own songs: Kenny Chesney
11. Least likely to stagedive: Kenny Rogers
12. Number of country blogs you read daily:1-3
13. Records the same thing over and over: Kenny Chesney/Rodney Atkins
14. Most distracting hairstyle: Gary LeVox
15. Favorite John Rich anecdote: all of them
16. Unfairly the subject of much mockery: Jessica Simpson
17. The opposite of Dale Watson:
18. Wouldn’t stand a chance at a regular job: Jessica Simpson
19. Suggested nickname for Dave Haywood: That other guy
20. Words of wisdom for Kenny Chesney: Are you turtely enough for the turtle club?
21. Poorest treatment of a controversial subject: Dixie Chicks
22. Song topic that really needs to be retired: I’m so country
23. Next artist to go all patriotic when hits start drying up: Tim McGraw
24. Age at which you should take the Taylor Swift poster off your wall: 15-17
25. Likely “special guest” at Rascal Flatts show: anyone not country