An Eclectic Journal of Opinion, History, Poetry and General Bloviating

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Tired of the Same Old Boring Holidays? Try Wombat Day

Break
out the Champaign and some tough roots, grass, and bark for the guest of honor!It’s Wombat
Day Down Under. It’s an ancient
tradition stretching all the way back to 2005.And so what if those asses in Canberra haven’t
gotten around to making it a legal
holiday with the Post Office closed, military parades, and bands playing Waltzing Mathilda, it’s good enough to
raise a can of Foster’s and throw another shrimp on the barbie.

The
occasion celebrates those cuddly
short-legged, muscular marsupials
native to Australia with pudgy snouts and short tails that resemble small,
over-fed bears.They are adaptable
to Australia’s various often in hospitable environments from arid semi-desert to forests and mountain sides.Not that
anyone actually sees them much in the wild.That’s because they are the world’s largest burrowing mammals—adults
average about 40 inches long and can weigh between 35 and 70 pounds—and spend
much of their lives in the their extensive burrow
systems.Being nocturnal they generally only come out to dine at night except for the rare darkly overcast, rainy day.

The
stout little beasts have powerful forelimbs with impressive claws for digging
and large rodent-like incisors to
gnaw through their tough diet choices.Their natural
predators were few—the dingo, now
extinct Tasmanian devil, and, of
course humans.Over the last century feral dogs have heavily damaged the
population.

Wombats are naturally
both slow moving and shy, but can be aggressive when startled or
threatened.They have been known to charge humans who get near them and are
large and heavy enough to knock down a grown man.Their long, sharp claws can slash human flesh and bites can penetrate stout boots and thick socks.On the other
hand, humans, both Aborigines and
early White settlers hunted them for
food.The settlers, with their fire arms and hunting dogs, quickly reduced the Wombat population and range
over much of the southeastern part of the Continent.

Despite
holding a day in their honor, Australians have a might ambivalent attitude
toward the wombat.The Aborigines did
not seem to esteem them, despite relying on them as a protein source.They did not
imbue them with the spiritual powers and significance of other animals—kangaroos, snakes, crocodiles, sharks, etc.—in their Dreamtime mythologies and seldom depicted them in their rock art.The origin story about them is hardly flattering—originating from a person named Warreen whose head had
been flattened by a stone and tail amputated as punishment for selfishness.

When
white settlers—most of them, you will recall, transported prisoners and their military guards—arrived, their opinion of the creatures was not
much better.At first because of the
similarity of size and burrow habitations they were mistaken for a kind of badger, the large European weasel and omnivore
totally unrelated thelocal
marsupial.Several Australian place names containing the name badger—Badger Creek, Victoria and Badger Corner,
Tasmaniafor instance—are really named for wombats.

The
English adopted the name from a corruption of the now extinct Darug Aboriginal language.In 1798 John Price was exploring in what is now New South Wales with James Wilson who had lived with the Aborigines
when he recorded in his diary:

We saw several
sorts of dung of different animals,
one of which Wilson called a Whom-batt,
which is an animal about 20 inches high, with short legs and a thick body with
a large head, round ears, and very small eyes; is very fat, and has much the
appearance of a badger.

Those ain't bon bons--cubic wombat scat. Now your day is complete.

That
dung or scat is among the most tell-tale signs of the presence of
wombats.Because of their fibrous diet and highly efficient digestive process, wombats leave
distinctive, compact cubical shaped
pellets.

It
took much of the 19th Century to standardize the spelling of the animal.Meanwhile they were being hunted for meat, sport, and because their burrowing was
seen as a nuisance to farming and
particularly sheep grazing.The Europeans characterized the animals
in their own folk stories as fat, lazy, and greedy.

By
the early 20th Century all three species—the common wombat, Northern Hairy-nosed Wombat, and Southern Hairy-nosed Wombat—were all
under pressure.Wombats were classified as vermin in 1906, and a bounty
was placed on them in 1925.The results
were entirely predictable.

The
Northern Hairy-nosed Wombat is extremely endangered.Only 138 were known to survive as of 2007 and
their range confined to the Epping
Forest National Park in Queensland where
they are protected behind a predator
proof fence.Tenuous efforts have
been made to re-establish another colony at the Richard Underwood Nature Refuge at Yarran Downs.The species
has become a symbol of Australian efforts to preserve endangered species.

But
their Southern cousins and the now far-from Common Wombat are also under
extreme pressure.All species have been
declared protected in all states but Victoria
where the Department of Environment
and Primary Industries still classifies them as a pest and allows both hunting and in some cases, poisoning.

The late Steve Irwin shows of a wombat giving you an idea of their size.

Attempts
by conservationists to manage a recovery of the population are hindered
by the low fertility and
reproductive rates of wombats.Adult
females produce only one offspring each breeding
season after a gestation of
20-21 days.They carry the joey in their well-developed pouches for seven months.Alone among marsupials, the wombat pouch
opens toward the animal’s rear.This
prevents the joey from being smothered
by dirt as the mother expands her burrow during which her powerful front legs
and claws toss dirt behind her.The
babies emerge as furry miniature adults.They are weaned
at 15 months and on their own and sexually
active at a year and a half.

The
threatened and endangered status of wombats has evoked some degree of public sympathy and affection for the previously scorned
critter.They are sometimes used as a
symbol for conservation efforts and have even appeared on Australian postage in recent years, something that their more glamorous cousins—Kangaroos, Koalas, Tasmanian Devils, and Platypuses achieved decades earlier.

Wombat
prestige has also been boosted as they funny looking animals have become
staples of Australian kiddy picture
books, children’s literature, and children’s television.One popular animated series features a wombat
family.

Still
the creatures lag behind those other iconic Aussie animals in public
acceptance.No Australian professional or college sports team has adopted the wombat as their mascot.

A typical wombat chocolate cake, the primary delicacy of the holiday by a home baker. Proffesional often make them much more elaborate, often like accurate three dimensional models of the animal.

Perhaps
that is why fans of the animal launched Wombat Day in 2005.It seeks to honor the animal, but has more
than a touch of tongue-in-cheek humor
about it.The only customs I could find associated with the celebration are viewing parties at zoos and animal preserves
and baking and consuming homemade chocolate cakes or brownies made in the shape of a wombat.Which leads me to suspect that the chocolate
industry may be behind much of the annual promotion of the holiday.Oh, they also consume a confection called Wine Gums.Beats the hell out of me what they are.

October
22 was supposedly chosen because it is smack
dab in the middle of the Southern Hemisphere
spring planting season and there are said to be certain vague traditions linking wombats with
fertility.These claims are open to question.

Anyway,
there you have it.A new reason to
celebrate.And coming the day after the Chicago Cubs exited the National League Championship Series after
four straight losses, this writer needs a cause to celebrate something.Pass the Wombat Cake.