TOP FIVE EMMY MOMENTS: And the winner is Jon Stewart, per People, “Play-wrestling with Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Fallon after the announcement of his tenth consecutive variety series win resulted in a very winded Stewart taking the stage. "I'm not in the kind of shape I should be in to do a bit with Jimmy Fallon!" he said. And to conclude a delightful acceptance speech, Stewart cracked, "Years from now, when the Earth is just a burning husk and aliens visit, they will find a box of these and they will know just how predictable these f---ing [awards shows] are!" http://bit.ly/QdkHor

MEANWHILE: Not a big fan of the show, per the Washington Post, “The television industry could show its solidarity by surrendering all the statuettes, heaving them into a yawning crucible and smelting them. The liquid scrap metal could be recast into one Prius-sized Emmy to be shared by Julia-Louis Dreyfus and Jon Stewart, who were the only people to show rebellious verve onstage during an otherwise dismal, predictable show hosted by that deadpan cipher of late night, Jimmy Kimmel.” http://wapo.st/QtQukZ

AND THIS: Making the best of a bad situation, per the New York Times, “This year, for the first time, not a single network show was nominated in the best drama category. That omission was so painful that networks went into denial. A montage of clips of the year in drama included shows not nominated for a best drama Emmy, including “NCIS” and “Grey’s Anatomy.” http://nyti.ms/RQ1BXs

WEEKEND BOX-OFFICE: Poor Clint, per the Los Angeles Times, “Jake Gyllenhaal's cop drama "End of Watch" and Jennifer Lawrence's horror vehicle "House at the End of the Street" tied for the No. 1 weekend position, each grossing a decent $13 million. Clint Eastwood's baseball drama, "Trouble With the Curve," didn't hit a home run with opening weekend audiences, as the movie debuted with a slightly lower sum of $12.7 million.” http://lat.ms/OlwRwL

UM, OK: Whatever, per the Huffington Post, “An Iranian official said Monday his country should boycott the 2013 Oscars and not field a candidate for the foreign film category in the wake of the anti-Islam video that was made in the United States and that denigrates the Prophet Muhammad.” http://huff.to/RQoLgq

CHANGE OF HEART: More like caving to the base, per Salon, “Recently, Lynyrd Skynyrd told CNN that it has stopped associating itself with the Confederate flag because “it became such an issue about race.” The flag had been hijacked by the KKK and other hate groups you see. However, after receiving lots of media attention and fan backlash, Skynyrd is sticking with the flag after all.” http://bit.ly/QzgR6j

PSY: Of an internet craze and beyond, per The Independent, “He has been signed by Justin Bieber's manager, has the most "liked" video in YouTube history and yesterday shot up to No 3 in the UK singles chart. But who is Psy, the South Korean rapper conquering the world's dance floors? As of yesterday, the video to "Gangnam Style", in which Psy demonstrates the "giddy-up" dance that will no doubt soon be standard fare at Christmas parties, had picked up 251 million views on YouTube.” http://ind.pn/OlKZGu

KATY PERRY: She should consult the magic 8-ball, per Radar, “(She) has fallen head-over-heels for John Mayer, but as far as her friends and family are concerned the relationship is headed for disaster, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting. The Wide Awake singer, 27, is absolutely smitten with the 34-year-old legendary ladies’ man, despite initially wanting to keep their relationship more casual.” http://rdar.co/Urkxb1

YUCK ALERT: You’ve been warned, per TMZ, “Kanye West is a sex tape master -- TMZ has learned, the rapper filmed himself doing the deed MORE than once in recent years ... and TWO tapes are currently being shopped to the highest bidder. The reports are true ... a Kanye sex tape featuring a young woman in a hotel room is making the rounds -- but what you haven't heard ... there's a second tape and the 2 are nearly identical.” http://tmz.me/Sgm4Pa

BLONDIE: Headlines? Really? Per Us Weekly, “Newlywed Natalie Portman made headline hair news over the weekend when the normally brunette beauty, 31, debuted sunny blonde hair at the Van Cleef & Arpels Dinner for L.A. Dance Project on Saturday. The Oscar-winning actress -- who hung out with husband Benjamin Millepied and Robert Pattinson at the bash -- told fellow revelers that the startling-but-stunning new look is for a film role, although she didn't elaborate.” http://bit.ly/TpMvZS

STRANGE: You have to clink on the link, and even then. . .per Rolling Stone, “At a concert in Houston two days after her drug arrest, Fiona Apple opened up to her audience about the experience while alluding obscurely to some kind of wrongdoing by people involved in the arrest.” http://bit.ly/Qd5sMe