17 mistakes Generation Google would never make

1. "I was 21 before I found out unicorns weren't real. Somebody was talking about unicorns over dinner and I mentioned that I'd seen a couple in a field at Chester Zoo when I was five. The whole table burst into laughter and I sat there open-mouthed not getting the joke. Now, 10 years on, I get unicorn presents yearly."

2. "I thought that couples only had sex when they wanted to have a baby."

3. "Grease and Happy Days were big when I was 10. I just assumed they were current American teenagers. I didn't get that it was set in the 50s."

4. "I thought a cunt was a baby horse until I was into my teens."

5. "When I was little, I thought there were two different types of seagulls - ones with legs, and ones without. Naturally the ones without legs had no choice but to fly all the time."

6. "I thought wolves were fictional until embarrassingly recently. I just thought that wolves were to dogs what unicorns are to horses."

7. "I used to believe that a man sat inside the cash machine and pushed cash through the slot when you asked for it. I believed that until I was 21. I have a degree and everything."

8. "I used to worry a lot that either God or Father Christmas must not be real because how could there be two omniscient beings? There was a lot of angst every Christmas over that one. Dinosaurs somehow came into the mix as possible fantasy creatures, like God. Of course now I know that both dinosaurs and Father Christmas are real..."

9. "When I was a small child there were news stories about Guerrilla warfare. I actually thought they had trained gorillas to use machine guns."

10. "I used to get horribly confused by all the talk of fighting over the Gaza strip. This was around the time Gazza still played football, whilst wearing his team's strip..."

11. "I used to think that petrol stations were built on top of oilfields."

12. "Recently (as in last week), I discovered the bookmaker Paddy Power was not a sort of Black Power for the Irish."

13. "I thought that treacle came from mines."

14. "I used to think that when the contestants on The Crystal Maze got locked in the room they were actually not allowed to go home."

15. "I thought Cliff Richard was a tiny little man who lived in the radiogram and sang songs. I thought if I looked into the radiogram I would see him."

16. "When I first saw a Harry Potter film, I found out the girl's name is not pronounced 'Hermy Yone'."

17. "I can remember thinking that cheese was mined because of the Cheddar Gorge. I thought it was a vast cheesy basin."