A life is isn't easy cause death is around your corner...so...spend it wisely and on your own.......^^

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

That Night of Sadness

Time:11.14pmdate:25.May.2010Location:My own room...

I was so busy of studying and I had to blog last two days about before I going home for a week.So..tonight I got a little time to blog.. I was....feeling guilt that I did not tell my dear friend about...until she cries on me.... What have I done???...sigh....she was crying of me cause...I didn't tell her about my nightmare that always scared me...and one night before I leave her home for a week...

Time:09.40pmDate:22.May.2010Location:Room 14...

That night was the most guilt night...and she hold my shirt and cry on me..and beg me..why am I like this? She was crazy...and ask me to stop this dream.I can't..and she cry sobbed like her tears fell every second. She told me.."Why are you always avoid us when we are off away?" As I told her "I don't know..." Now this is making me worse.She hold my back tight and ask me and why are you dream...and why am I...doing this to avoid all things up. I hope and wish to be left by myself there...and I doesn't know what to do now...on that night I dream to wish this dream wasn't true...but...it's a de-ja-vu...

SIGH......

Then...her eyes made my shoulder wet..and wet and make my hand froze.I can feel her heartbeat for a while...and she was sobbed for a while. As then...her eyes slowly close...and I just look at her....and she started to wake...and slap me in the face...then...she started to laugh.... I wonder why....her slap...haha....she said to me..."Ben...don't make us worry...and I hope...your nightmare will disappear..." I took her hand..and said..."I hope so."..My face with the red marks remind of a slap from a friend...and make me not to worry much on that dreams. I hope so...Then....she hold my touch my chest side and said.."Your heartbeat is slow..you should rest"..and look at my eyes that turn black and pale.I did not sleep for two days that time cause...I was busy a little and having to avoid...sigh...nevermind...

Later...she wanted to go to bed..and I take her there...and said a goodnight forehead kiss..and I went back to my room...and go back to her room..and I wanted to tell her another thing that....actually..in our life...nevermind...at the end you'll know.

Time:05.00amDate:23.May.2010Location:Room 14...

I was resting and...finished pack up...and had a hot bath made by myself.I was the only one who awake and suddenly.....Sumi awake and heading to the kitchen.I was finish bath and change that time.Then...I went to the kitchen and ask her..."Why are you here?"..and she said.."Oh!!...I hungry a bit.."..and I sweated!!! She took a few potato chips and ask me if I wanted to share with her and I said.."Okay.."..and then..we head to the garden and eat together.

Time:Between 06.00amLocation:Garden side...

I was seating on the bench and look at the grass that is wet and fill with many greenery...and then,Sumi pop out the Shandy can..and drank.I told her that drink beer in the morning is not good and stop drink and said.."Your right"..and then..she hand me over the potato chips and I open it up and eat some..and then..she start to ask me question...

"Why..we all live here?"

And I told her..freedom...and she start ask me again...

"Long enough?"...

"Maybe.."

"Why maybe?"

"Cause..."..and my tongue hang my answer for it.

"Because of Wendyll,right?"

I just nodded my head.

She sigh at me and said..."Life always fell...like me..no family at all but still can leave alone."

I look at my hand and hold the ring.

"Hmm...you two not gonna stay here longer but what about us?"she ask me again.

"I don't know...maybe...I and Wendy meant to be separated"I told her.

"I know I know...you two..lost a twin..right?"she said in her soft tone.

I just nodded my head again.

She hold my back and said.."Hey..don't be sad.I understand what is the meaning of lost a family.You just lost a brother and I lost my both family."

"Sorry"I told her...and she chuckled laugh at me.

I really don't understand...she can be so happy now even she lost her family...but before that she was sad that time...and change a lot after we move in...and she said...

"Thank you"she smiled..

"Why?"I was curious..

"Cause..you help me a lot together with Wendyll"

"Err...I don't know...that will happen"I scratch my head.

Then...she gave me a hug a while and said thanks again..and going to her room...and I was grateful to help a person..but...can I help myself? SURE CAN!

Time:Between 08.00amLocation:Room 14....

Wendy woke up and went to my room..and I wasn't sleeping instead I was reading a book...and she knock the door...and I open it. She said..

"Sorry..about yesterday."she was regret herself.

"Nevermind.."I hold her shoulder...

"Ben..one week..will you be fine?"she look at me...

"I will!!"like Sumi told me this morning...

Then...she hold the ring and said..."Don't lost it...and I will hope for you always...as always."

I told her.."I will."

Then...Ka Zi call me up..cause..I was about to leaving.She said hurry up cause...I had to go to church later...so...I hold Wendyll hand and give a headkiss..and Ka Zi said..

"Young love..as always.."

I look at her and laugh...a bit.Wendyll said...

"Not as long.."

And I went in to her car....and she wave me "See you"..and not goodbye...

And I look at her...inside the car..and Ka Zi said..."ready?"...

I tell her "Okay"...

Time:09.00amLocation:Church....

I thank to Ka Zi that she send me home...and I was at home as my dogs.."Rock and Lucky"..greets me...while surround me.I seat down and hug both of them and then...my brother open the door for me...and said..."Hey...come on in."..==''...with his silly cloth.

Then..I went to church.....

I look at all my youth brothers and sisters...and look at my ring....and my friends....and hope for them...were fragile...sigh.......

Then...Rebecca..one of my sister youth...said..."Wish you luck in exam"..and I thank her..and also...I wish everyone too...who had exam for this year...later...I went home...at 02.00pm...........

Time:11.30amLocation:School(SMKTK)Date:24.may.2010

As always in school...miss old friends...as usual...sigh...wish I can Fong again..i wonder where the hell is him??...Always don't online....jeez....

Then...I ask Riby...and she said.."He only online for two hours a week.."

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!A WEEK FOR ONLY TWO HOURS!!???

Oh my...brother...what happen???

Man...if he online I better chat with him and ask him why..

Then...I went home....with walking...as usual cause...my house was a little near.

Time:Now....Location:In my room...

Now...I miss Wendyll..Law...and my friends....wish they were here now...but only a week..and remember Riby words.."Thank and grateful"..and my head is up!!

Now....I know..I had this chance..for it....and also...I will study hard for this year PMR for everyone and make a day for it...and be a better way of it!!!Just like I did to Sumi...give her a hope to make her happy again.

Oh crap!!...Now my dad scold me cause..I was online till late...and now..I off the light and if my dad finds out that I online now...I'll be deadmeat...

Well.....I gotta go now...cause...exam...and I wish for everyone out there...who having exam...goodluck...and not just that...wish you all the best...and also...Riby...thanks for everything and Fong,my brother....thank you for everything...and also....I am proud to calling you.."Bro"....

Nevermind...I will go dad...as usual.....hahaha...well.....see you all later...cause...tomorrow exam...and wish you all luck!!!And try the best you all can!!!!!!!And Sumi...thank you...for everything...you help me that I help you...thank you...and I hope...you'll be happy as always...even without family...like me...just a small matter...and a lost brother....thank you...very much..

To Be Continued................................................

Benny Liew.....................(Missing you doesn't mean I can't see you...and I will see you all soon...and I will...see you...").........................................................

P.S..(All the dialog translated from Mandarin...to English..cause all of them speak Mandarin and I had to translate it)..=='