now navigating the post-graduate limbo completely by grace

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When life hands you a diploma. . .

It’s been a long time since my last post. A lot of changes have transpired over the past six months, and the biggest is this: I am now a college graduate. It’s actually been five months and one day since I switched my sablay from my right shoulder to the other (our school’s traditional way of showing that one has her degree conferred).

When I was still studying, I was looking forward to all the free time I could use to write on this blog. It’s been six months since UP freed me from academic slavery, and I have not a single post to show for it. It’s not because I wasn’t writing. My personal journal have not been abandoned and I have even succumbed to my brief On the Jellicoe Road fandom and wrote a fan fiction for the first time ever. I did write. I just couldn’t do it here.

This was supposed to be a blog about my student life. Here I am, no longer a student for the first time in 17 years. It is as if my whole life was leading up to that afternoon I graduated from college. The sun set, and the afternoon turned into evening. When my graduation dinner was over and the camera ran out of memory, I was left to face the fact that I am about to embark on a completely unfamiliar, hundred-forked road.

If I had to choose a word to describe my post-college life, I would pick “confusion”. It’s been almost half a year and I still don’t know what to do with my life. To be fair to myself, I have up to the end of November accounted for. Reviewing for my impending board exam should keep me busy until then. I don’t even want to think about failing it and finding myself tied up to review for another five months. I don’t think I could stand to suspend my life for that long. I want to go home and do the things I vowed I would before graduation. This after-college/ pre-board exam period feels like a limbo. It’s driving me crazy.

To make myself feel less crazy, I have decided to open this blog again. I’m going to deactivate my facebook in a few weeks in the hopes that I can focus on my board exam review. I will use this blog as a positive reinforcement for myself. If I get a solid day of studying, I can wordpress the night away. I hope it’s going to be effective.

Meanwhile, I’m going to be posting some of my less personal recent journal entries here, so don’t judge me if my topics feel outdated. For now, let me welcome myself back to the World of WordPress! 🙂