New Bartender

This is a discussion on New Bartender within the Off Topic & Humor Discussion forums, part of the The Back Porch category; A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot ...

New Bartender

A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, "Sir, what will you have?"

The man thought a moment then replied? "A martini, please". The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had. The robot then asked, "Sir, what is your IQ?"

The man answered "Oh, about 164." The robot then proceeded to discuss the 'theory of relativity', 'inter-stellar space travel', the latest medical breakthroughs', and other matters of equal import.

The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tack. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked to attention and asked what he would have. "A Martini please?" Again it was superb The robot again asked, "What is your IQ sir?"

This time the man answered, "Oh, about 100". So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Dodgers to do this weekend.

The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool.... Again a martini, and the question, "What is your IQ?"

"He went on two legs, wore clothes and was a human being, but nevertheless he was in reality a wolf of the Steppes. He had learned a good deal . . . and was a fairly clever fellow. What he had not learned, however, was this: to find contentment in himself and his own life. The cause of this apparently was that at the bottom of his heart he knew all the time (or thought he knew) that he was in reality not a man, but a wolf of the Steppes."

There are over 550 million firearms in worldwide circulation. That's one firearm for every twelve people on the planet. The only question is: How do we arm the other 11? (Yuri Orlov [Nicolas Cage] Lord of War)

"He went on two legs, wore clothes and was a human being, but nevertheless he was in reality a wolf of the Steppes. He had learned a good deal . . . and was a fairly clever fellow. What he had not learned, however, was this: to find contentment in himself and his own life. The cause of this apparently was that at the bottom of his heart he knew all the time (or thought he knew) that he was in reality not a man, but a wolf of the Steppes."