March 19, 2014

The 14 Stages Of Book Addiction

1. You buy a book you’ve heard a lot of buzz about and
figure you’ll just try it out.

2. You’re a few pages in thinking “I mean, I don’t really
see what all the fuss is about.”

3. Fifty pages in and now you need to know what happens. You
NEED to know.

4. You look forward to even a few minutes of downtime
because that is precious reading time.

5. Sleep is no longer important since these late hours in
the night are when no one disturbs you and asks “What are you reading??” as if
holding a book in front of your face is not enough of a ‘Please do not disturb’
sign.

6. An internal conflict starts to develop as part of you
wants to know how the story ends and the other part of you can’t bare the
thought of life without this book.

7. You become unhealthily attached to the main characters,
especially if the narrator is in love with the novel equivalent to your girlfriend.

8. You think you might love a character more than you love
your actual girlfriend.

9. You start to become the book’s biggest marketing tool as
you preach about the literary masterpiece to your friends. As in, “Oh My God! You have to read this book! NO, LIKE YOU HAVE TO!”

10. Reality is no longer of importance. Your work can wait, so can the taxes,
the main characters are in danger!!

11. If something tragic happens to the main character or
your book , you cry for your loss, because literally no one around you cares
about your mental anguish.

12. You finish the book and your heart aches as you say
goodbye to those characters forever.

13. Walking into a bookstore afterwards is like being thrown
back into the dating world after getting dumped.

14. You find a flaw in every book you pick up and realize
you’re just not ready to get back out there.